Evening journal., 1907-08-22
Personal and Pertinent

You say that love me-" said: that you would
DO anything for me. am going TO put you the
Darling am ready to do anything to dare anything
Of wild beasts win do it, If YOU would have me iump
70 take te RISK Bid me navigate the rapids OF Niagara
in barrel and will make the effort, so that you may
know how deep rs my affection for YOU"
Il shall not ASK do any the foolish things you
4mentpH hlu won't you, n you really love go out IN
1ne pock yard and play croquet with Aunt Mehitabe?
she says she gets SO lonesome knocking the balls around
With groap Of despair he grabbed his hat and ran
she had asked too much He could not even for her
love assume the risk of being referred to molly
Shelf am not mistaken have the Of speaking
to the renowned bass, have not?
llerTAnd what can / do for you, madam
Shelf YOU would be kind TO call out 'Johannl"
at the top of your voice can't find my carrage-Fie
gende Baetter.
Sir Launeeot-My faith, most sour-yisaged waitress
Sir Galahad-Nay. speak more softly of the damsel.
knight Who can deny that she is passing are?Kansas
city Star
Madge-what did Molly by saying that joining
the Audubon Society was good business proposition?
Marjorie-Ihe dues are only So while hat with
feathers on it cost at least S2O.-Harpers Weekly.
"A mans life is full Of crosses and temptations
lie comes into this world without his consent and goes
out against his Will and the trip between the two is
ceedngy rocky The rule of contraries is of the
important features of the trip
When he is ltte the big girls kiss him. but when he
If he is he is bad if he is rich he is
dishonest
If he needs credit he it, if he is prosperous
everyone wants to do him favor
If he's in politics it's for pie If he's politics you
can't place him, and he's no good for his country
II he doesn't give TO charity he is stngy cuss, IL he
does il is for show.
If he actively religious he is hypocrite If he takes
no interest in religion he is a hardened sinner
II he shows affection he is a soft specimen if he seems
to care for no one he is cold-blooded
If he dies young there a great him.
If he lives 10 old he has missed his calling.
The Road is Rocky but Man Loves to travel it,
A Kansas man convinced that advertising pays He
advertised for a lost IS bill and stranger who had
picked up the the advertisement and
restored the bill TO the advertiser. A few Days later
while looking over wastcoat he had laid or the origi-
nal lost bill was found in a pocket lie adverts-
ing pays 100 per cent-Utica Press
"The late Francis Murphy" said a Pltsburg man.
"was perhaps the greatest temperance reformer
country has over 100000 people thanks
his labors, took the pledge.
Mr. Murphy, a plain, sincere man. hated snobbish-
ness hardly less than drunkenness At dinner here
Pittsburg once heard him rebuke, with little
dote, snobbish millionaire
"IIe said there a rich snobbish English woman
living in the country Her husband put himself up
political place and in order help his campaign along
the woman gave garden party to which every voter
for miles around invited.
Among the humble guests very Independent
grocer. The grocer made himself quite at home No
dukes manner could have been easier and reer Indeed
the mans total lack Of subserience angered his hostess
down peg. she said to him signfeanty;
You know Mr. Greens in London shopkeepers don't
into the best society
The grocer looked at her and nodded smiled
"'rhey don't here, either, ma'am. he said"-wash.
ington star.
Judge Blank. Justice of the Peace in Oklahoma,
called upon to perform the marriage ceremony for
young couple of Guthrie.
The Judge who until short time before had gained
his legal knowledge in neghboring State where
listers officially ohiciate such occasions. a
loss to know how TO proceed However. he to
the occasion. Commanding the couple up, he
directed that they be sworn in the following terms
do you soemnly that you will obey the
stitutOn OF the United states and the Constitution the
Territory of Oklahoma and perform the duties your
Office 10 the best OF ability, help God?'
The couple nodded assent Then, continued the Judge
by the power in vested by the strong of
law pronounce man and wife now. henceforth
forever and you WIFI stand committed until the
and costs are paid and may the Lord have mercy on
yoC- esslsl '-Pkladephia Ledger