davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12
HAD NO DOUBT OF HIS FATE.
Mr. Jerome Evidently Was Aware Of
His Wife's Culinary Ability.

Some weeks ago the wife OF Judge
Blank. Of Pacific avenue. lost her cook,
and since she had no other resource
che rolled M her sleeves and for a
week provided such meals as the Judge
had not enjoyed since those happy
DAYS when the Blanks did not keep a
cook. The judges delight was so great
that by way OF appreciative acknowl-
edgment he presented Mrs. Blank
vith n beautiful ermine cloak. Quite
naturally. the incident was a good
DEAL noised about among the social
acquaintances of the Blanks and a
spirit Of enviOus emulation was de
veloped in certain quarters. Ii was in
this mood that Mrs. Jerome recited
the story 10 her husband. What do I
get. Jerry she asked. IF will do
the cooking for a week." Well"
said Mr. Jerome. at the end Of a
week. my dear. you'H get one Of those
long crepe wells. San Francisco
Argonaut
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

"Hum-ah-exceedingly delighted
pray accept my congratulations !
stammered
Thanks said Jack 4 thought
you would be pleased The young
vagabond actually winked as he said
this
All. yes-of course said I. with
futile attempt az dignity. Kitty Is a
charming-that is. you will both be-
er-very happy
We mean TO be- he asserted stout
ly. Don't we. little woman
Yes" she whispered softly. press
ing his arm with her daintily gioved
hand. Irony Of ironies, had bought
those gloves
IN look you up this evening at
your club" said Jack. making A. IL to
move on.
'Yes-do," said I.
They departed in a clustering gale
Of laughter. two young. handsome. per
fectly mated creatures. and /
! jammed my hat firmly down upon
my head. and walked away as IL the
love affairs Of a mere boy and girl
could have no interest for a confirmed
old bachelor Of something and forty.
Kitty and are the best o, friends
still. She Is Mrs. Owen now. and does
not seem at all 20 regret having
thrown herself away upon q worthless
young scamp like Jack she actually
ado-es the fellow. and has forgiven
him his outrageous treatment Of her.
even though the only -extenuating cir.
cumstanee" was bunch Of mistlstoe,
But then. women are like that-hum-
bugs. yes. humhuxs. call en-!
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12
Rather than one OF the Others she
concluded hastily.


Rather than one Of the others" she
concluded hastily
".
wandered disconsolateiy in A less
freQuented part OF the avenue trying
TO think things out II was now close
upon a month since my last iete-a -tete
with Kitty. and during that time had
never once been able 10 catch her
alone. Indeed. on most OF the occa.
sions when | called she was out. a
piece of bad luck had not hitherto
been accustomed to: and when | did
find her in. she was either surrounded
by friends, or engaged in elaborate
sewing operations which necessitated
the constant attendance Of her maid.
Once or twice. too. caught sight of
Master Jack in town. when by the
calendar he ought to have been pursu
ing his studies; and the circumstance
coupled with his obvious anxiety tC
avoid me, Allied my mind with a vague
fOrebOding.
What the deuce does it mean" |
asked myself. as | strobe along with
eyes thoughtfully bent upon the
ground. regardless alike of passers-by
and the people who would have passed
by had | not collided with them.
cannoned on an eminent dignitary
OF the church. and ran full tilt against
a smartly dressed couple who were
lodging round the episcopal back. Il
could only see the billowy edging of
dainty skirt-and what not-aboye a
still daintier ankle. and the bottoms
of pair of Immediately creased trou-
sers) Ny murmured apology was cut
excessively short as | raised my ha,
| and my eyes at the same time. 1t was
Jack and Kitty. looking very spic and
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12
BOTH GAINED
Nan and Wife Fs..en on erape.nu...

The notion that meat is necessary
for real strength and the foundation
of solid flesh is no longer as prevalent
as formerly.
Excessive meat eaters are usually
sluggish a part OF the time because
they are not able to fully digest their
food. and the undigested portion is
changed into what is practically a
kind OF poison that acts upon the
blood and nerves. thus getting all
through the system.
was a heavy meat eater" writes
an His. man, and up to two years
ago, was in very poor health. | suf.
fered with indigestion so that I onIv
weighed IS pounds.
Then ! heard about Grape-Nuts and
decided to try il. My wife laughed at
me at first but when | gained to 125
pounds and felt so fine. she thought
she would cat Grape-Nuts too.
Now she is fat and well and hss
gained 40 pounds. We never have in
digestion any more and seldom feel
the desire for meat A neighbor of
ours, 6S years old. was troubled with
indigestion for years; was a heavy
meat eater, and now since he has been
eating Grape-Nuts regularly. he saws
ne Is well and never has Indigestion.
l could name lot Of persons who
have really been cured Of Indigestion
by changing from heavy meat diet
TO Grape-Nuts-" There's a Reason. "
Name given by Postum Co. Battle
Creek. Mich.
Read the little book, The Road To
Wellville" in pkgs.
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

future. But. aiss, when a man II In
my condition. he Suddenly an idea
occurred 10 me.
Very well. my fine fellow" said,
thrusting the letter into my pocket,
we shall see-what We shall see. He
who laughs first. laughs worst. This
viii settle your little game. at any
rate"
Miss MaInwaring was at home I
made my way up to the dainty blue
and white shrine IN which Kitty re-
ceived her most devoted worshippers.
I found her standing by a small tea
table in the center Of the room when
I entered
All" she exclaimed. running TO
meet me. = am glad you have COME"
Not more So than | am" | replied,
pressing her hand warmly.
"Oh. heaps" she said gaily. Il am
just dying to hear the news. Have
you discovered snything?"
4 have" said /. taking seat by
the tcatable. Il have discovered ev
erything"
She clapped her hands delightedly.
You dear old thing" she cried. Il
knew you would. who was it,"
1t was that misguided nephew Of
mine" / announced gloomily.
For a moment thought she vas
going to get up and dance round the
room. Then suddenly she became
grave. and the light died out of her
eyes
OH" she remarked. 1T was Jack.
vas it,"
Yes" said I. 1T vas Jack
She poured out a cup Of tea and
passed It to me. keeping her eyes fixed
on the tea-cosy the while.
Then we talked about other matters
until Il was time for me TO 20.
Goodbye" she said: and thank
you for taking so much trouble"
1t was no trouble assured her.
One must do the polite thing. you
know. at any cost.
4 can only hope" continued. that
in time you will BE- able 70 forgive my
nephew for such an act OF gross i'm
pertinence
All. yes" she answered warmly. Il
think-yes. I am really very glad II
vas Jack"
OH calculated sharply.
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

We have used. in place OF the reg
ulatiOn evergreen tree. a small cal
tree. writes a Suburban Life CORES
pOndent. We have selected a pretfily
shaped one. the more irregular the
better. and placed it in the middle
Of the room on the regular Christmas.
tree standard. There have been usu.
ally few leaves left upon the tree
which We have taken care not TO
knock of
We have frosted one side of the
tree and the branches so that. seen
in the light. it seemed as II the snow
storm had been blowing across the
bare tree and had stuck.
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12
SOMETHING OF A cYNic.
Papa Had Extreme Views on TIRE Sub
jeet Of Marriage.

Miss Marie Cahill, the actress, chose
the chorus girls for her new play.
Marrying Mary" by measurement
The Bertillon system was employed.
BY this excellent system Of meas
urement." said Miss Cahill the other
day. ''one gets. in a chorus girl. the
real thing. Mirage is avoided. You
know what a mirage is? Quite sure?
Well. at any rate. III point out its
meaning to you with a story.
a boy looked up from his book
one night.
Father he said. what is a mi
rager
The father answered glibly from
behind his paper:
The union OF a man and woman
till death or the law them do part
But said the boy, that's mar
rage. amt it!'
Same thing. sonny: it's the same
thing. replied the father. A man
imagines he sees wonders and delights
where there is nothing. Fight shy Of
'em both. my boy"
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12
ECZEMA COVERED BABY.
Worst Case Doctors Ever saw-suf'
fered Untold Misery-Perfeet
Cure by cutieura Remedies.

"My son. who is now twenty-five
years Of age. when four months old
began to have eczema on his face.
spreading quite rapidly until he was
nearly covered. The eczema was some
thing terrible. and the doctors said 1t
was the worst case they ever saw. At
times his whole body and face were
covered. all but his feet. / used many
kinds of patent medicines. to no avail.
A friend teased me to try Cuticura-
At last decided to try Cuticura when
my boy was three years and four
months old. having had eczema all that
time and suffering untold misery. I
began to use all three Of the Cuticura
Remedies. He was better in two
months: in six months he was well.
Mrs. R. l. Risley. Piermont, n. H.
Oct "a. 1905"
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

man had been very badly treated
hy the proprietors OF a boarding
house. and when in temporary fnan.
rial difficulties had been forced to
leave. Some time later. smiled upon
BY tickle fortune. he achieved success
and prosperity as a popular dentist.
and soon found means to revenge his
former landlady's slight The method
he adopted was simple but extremely
effective. quite running the business OF
his enemy. Directly opposite the
boarding house he opened his new
dental establishment. and upon the
largest window in bold letters ap-
peared the following notice: Steel
pointed boarding house teeth a spe-
cialtyi"
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12
On. lining ttsIa Him eaek.

There vas a racket Of some kind
IN our house last night. said the man
who lives in fiat building Screams
came from one Of the rear flats and
everybody vas booking out ;he win
doWs 20 see what the matter could be.
Various ordinations and coniectures
were made By the rubberuecks and
soon several women were screaming
in sympathy Presently out of the
awful din rose a deep masculine voice
exclaiming in evaporation and with
the manner Of one feeling around in
the dark I'd go for a policeman II
could find my pants"
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

NetOmmend fe-fu-nS.
NTR. EDWARD NJ. BURTT. 5N JET
1N1 fer>on Ave. -. Louis. Mo. writes /:
'ltafFcrdsme much pleasure to an
nounce that have used your medicine
az various times for several wears. and
that n has given entire satisfaction. not
only in my own family. hut also that ot
others OF my friends And would cheer
fully recommend the use Of Peruna, as
| certainly do endorse your medicine.
Cstsrrh Of Heed, Nose, throat.
Mr.. Charles Levy. 50 Allen St, New
York, y. Y. writes:
II am very glad 70 tell you % the
cures wrought by rcruna in my family.
My son, aged seven. who had ca
tarrh Of the nose, was cured hv two
bottles Of Peruna. and had catarrh Of
the head, nose, throat and ears. One
bottle OF Peruna cured me"
Pe-ru-na IsbIets:-Some people prefer
tablets, rather than medicine In "a fluid
form. such people can Obtain Peru
na Tablets. which represent the solid
medicinal ingredients Of Peruna.
Ask Your Druggist for Free Pcruna
Almanac for 1908.
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

Respect is due to the man on his
last journey TO the cemetery. and the
New York cabuan who was making
for the Central station showed the
proper feeling in driving for some dis
tance along the procession without
trying TO cross H. But at last he
could contain himself no longer.
Turning his horse across the hearse.
he said. in a cabman's whisper: Look
ere. my fares in a 'urry. an yours
ANTI"
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

span. and no little pleased with them
selves.
"Eh7 What" gasped. taken some
what aback
Kitty's smile was as the wine OF
oporto in its intoxicating sweetness.
"Oh." she cried, 1T Is Mr.. Walker,"
Il is" said I. frowning at her leyity.
I was feeling in no particularly light
mood myself just then.
She pouted and turned to her com
panion.
Don't you think. Jack" she said.
you ought TO tell your uncle about
about IT,
Certainly" responded that young
hopeful You will. my dear uncle. be
delighted to learn that have Just OBJ
tained Mrs. Mainwaring's consent to
my engagement with Kitty here"
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12
Deafness Cannot Re Cured

- ira s7r.iczfi0ns. - fH-F csaaaf r~ara th- Z !.
ets-i o rfIn . THE ar There - la'g aa- uay q
sare irAfu~-s az that e ~ e1u-tfrlfaS r~rsi'--
Jan. it ca4-si ~ a. Iufaue1 e1uslri.u q tne
nleq1s iililg = iae Elstaclfar Tlna Whrr tri.
VIZ = suiaIrl "a have ruun Ing -aurt % f-,-
PR ~ lrarilz sa4 shes f fs elri--Iy cs-l p-af-
80 = ine -rslf ta4 1uless t1e ia fuarfsr r1 -
tAsfn nst All tns t4'ze restored % irs lrrrs rrg.
e a. lrari1e Eil - eesfrsf-d f4r~rer. utre -rse-
sAt 2 tn 49, raus@1 uV GatAr~h witch . rstr =.
blf ar insAmet suiiffan - the ar1e - ss-s.-~s
We EiI give uu- Hantsst naI A.. flr srr -. -.
ises.a~-- 81 - eatarrhl taa- cAnnnf - r1re4
y hA-.s CAiafrh A1-e. -saf flF rfrrslars free
T. CHENEY a Co. T1sst5. y
~1'f ~ nruzzists 7s-
Tkke hags Fa1tlv PfIfs fsr 5-s.fs.ft5-
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12
Preachers comfortino R.msrk,.

At an evening prayer meeting in a
Maine village the senior deacon,
Dominicus Jordan. arose 20 make ap-
propriate scriptural remarks about
the death OF the late Miss SImpkins.
In conclusion the deacon said: Il re-
spected Miss Simpkins. the members
OF this church respected Miss Simp-
kins. the citizens OF this town re-
spected Miss Simpkins. but now she's
dead and gone TO the Lord. and the
scripture saith. The Lord is no re-
specter Of persons. ns."-Exchange
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12
RlI.y ana N. M.a,,,.r

While going 10 the Office Of his pub
fishers on a bright morning in Septem.
Der. James Whitcumb Riley met. what
seemed 10 him. an unusually large
number Of his aequaintances who
made the conventional remark about
the weather This unremitting an-
plause pleased and amused him. When
greeted at the Office with Nice dav.
Mr. Riley he stopped az the door and
answered drolly: "Yes-yes-Iye
heard IL very highly spoken Of"
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

The Huts OF the poor. the Halls OF the
rich.
Are neither exempt from some form Of
itch.
Perhaps a distinction may be made in
the name.
But the rich and the poor must scratch
just the same
o. why should the children OF Adam
endure
An afiiction so dreadful. when Hunts
Cure does eure9
All forms Of itching. Price SOC. Guar
anteed.
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12
u Matters Not.

No matter the name; no matter the
place; II you are afflicted with that in
tolerable. often excruciating itching
sensation. you want a cure and want il
quick
Hunts Cure is an infallible. never
falling remedy. II cures. Only SOC per
box and strictly guaranteed.
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12
How He Did Il.

Early in the morning session. when
the pupils were feeling bright and
happy. the teacher thought It good
plan 10 give them sentences 10 cor
rect, both as to grammar and sense.
She accordingly wrote on the black
board:
The hen has four legs. He
done it,
Thoughtful little Ignatius. at the
foot Of the class. pondered deeply. and
at the end Of Is minutes time. allowed
for correction. be wrote:
He didn't done 1t. God done it,
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12
Truthful Boast.

A party Of travelling men in a Chi
cago hotel were one day boasting of
the business done by their respective
firms. when one of the drummers said:
No house in the country. / am proud
TO say. has more men and women
pushing its line Of goods than mine" "
What do you SELF" he was asked.
Baby carriages" shouted the drum.
mer. as he fed from the room.-Suc-
cess Magazine.
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

ax%fT was an objectionable liber-
ID ty." said Kitty
" The temptation" began.
She cut me short with an angry 1t
tie frown
THAT has nothing whatever to do
with IT, she remarked icily
"On the contrary said I. 1T pal
liates the oIense. II & does not alto
gether excuse It. Let MS consider the
facts 81 the case You were spending
Christmas with your aunt. Mrs Glen
torridon. IN the country. One evening
as YOU were passing along a darkened
corridor. on the way 10 your room.
you met a certain gentleman"
He wasn't a gentleman" she inter
posed quickly.
oh" exclaimed Il certainly
thought that your aunt's guests"
He wasn't true gentleman" she
added disdainfully. or he wouldn't
have acted as he did"
"A discourtseus gentleman. then
who taking advantage OF the darkness.
deliberately kissed you upon"
Don't he rid.culous,- she snapped
4 asked you TO help me-
Il am endeavoring to do 20. said I.
Then do II properly" assumed
an air OF profound gravity. Kitty re-
garded mo thoughtfully out Of cor
ner of her deep blue eye You see"
she continued. 4 don't know who Il
was-and we'll. you know. it makes
it rather awkward for me"
Didn't you see his face" asked.
NO" she answered He came Up
behind. and-and it vas all over in
a second" She shudde-ed preitily. 1t
was quite dark she added. and
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

G. W. Farlowe. East Florence. Ala,
writes.
For nearly seven years I was az.
hicted with a form Of skin disease
which caused an almost unbcarable
itching I could neither work. rest or
sleep in peace. Nothing gave me per-
mSnent relief until tried Hunts Cure.
One application relieved me; one box
cured me. and although a year has
passed. I have stayed cured. am crate
ful beyond expression"
Hunts Cure is guaranteed for all
itching diseases Of the skin. Price soc.
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

Il sincerely believe. all things con-
sidered. Hunts Lightning Oil is the
most useful and valuable household
remedy in existence For Cuts. Burns.
Sprains and Insect Bites. 1t has no
equal. so far as my experience goes {"
G. E. HUNTINGTON.
EufaIa- Ala
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

Burglar (rousfng the sleeping head
Of the family--Don't move or Ill
shoot, Whar's your money hid7" Head
OF the Family (struck by a bright
thoughtl-'-It's in the pocket Of my
wife's dress" Burglar-That's all
right III just take the dress
Thanks"
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

Mrs. IIighfyer-Yes. George ~as
away behind in his alimony. said money
was tight and all that. but brought
him around.
The Platonic Friend-IIow did you
manage it,
Mrs. Highflycr-Oh wrote him
little letter threatening TO 40 back and
live with him.
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

three years I suf-
fered everything
with rheumatism in
my limbs and a
dull. ceaseless ach-
ing in my back. |
was weak. languid.
broken with head
aches and dizzy
spells. and the kid
ney secretions were
thick with solids.
| was really in n
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

only saw his shirtfrolt. He was in
evening dress. you know
But were there no DISTINGUISHING
features. such as a shirt stud. ora
moustaehe?" I suggested.
Oh. yes,r she responded quickly.
h. had moustache. and | think he
was tall, because he had TO bend down
when when he did it His shirt stud
vas a plain gold one. believe"
Well said I. how many tall men
were there in the party who possessed
moustaches and plain gold shirt
studs"
Let me see" she mused: there
was Capt. Jack Hsrland, Mr Porter.
and your nephew Jack"
| frowned severely. Jack was an
impertinent young rascal. whose pre-
sumptuous attentions to Kitty Main
waring had disgusted me on several
! occasions.
Jack" I said. is quite capable Of
behaving in such a disgraceful man
ner"
Yes she assented. almost cheer
fully; but don't think it was Jack.
/ At least she added with a bright
smile. 1 want you to be dear old
+ | mean. a good. kind-hearted person.
and find out for me"
1T shall be done," cried. rising
both to the occasion and to take my
leave.
II
IL IS one thing to make a prom Sc
In all the glow of a generous moment.
and another thing to keep il in the
cold. practical light of after-reasoning.
However, | did the best that I could
| In the first place I wrote to Jack. who
was then at Harvard. and. without di-
vulging the source OF my information.
stated briefly what had come TO my
knowledge, and asked him IL he could
throw any light on the matter. II was
some two or three days before I re-
| ceived his reply which was character
/ Lstically brief and ran:
Dearest Uncle:-I received your
] letter containing a vivid description
/ OF what you term the shameful out
rage Now, / don't mind confessing
TO you that am the culprit. because
you have been young yourself (oncs)
and know that the path Of youth is
strewn, etc. Besides. there were ex.
tenuating circumstances in this case
Like the decent old sort you are. make
/ IL right for me with the girl. and for
ever earn the gratitude OF. Your arec-
| tionate nephew. Jack Owen.
"P. 81 don't know that I wouldn't
do 1t again II I got the chance"
| folded the letter and sat in INV
armchair. staring savagely at the fire.
Here had got myself into no end OF
a mess. and most probably lost two
/ good friends. at least. not 10 mention
making myself utterly ridiculous. over
this confounded business. and all the
time ! might have guessed who was
the real offender. wished now that
had waited before casting suspicious
upon the hospitable captain and the
Influential Mr.. Porter. both OF whom
! would doubtless cut me dead in the
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

Blow eV'ry horn Al early morn
And beat the noisy drum.
And let - make the ecaus wake-
For Christmas DAY has cone
Let SOY tells ring ls. .VerYthinE
And al fhe World % gay.
And lst - shout the giadae<s ous
On Joyful Christmas dAy.
Let sorrow 90 and Yuietiae flow
TIE King ctr tribute pay.
In music sweet his praise repeat
This i his natal day
ROBERT r. CARRFLr.
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12
Dire Exrectation.

Dif you have an excuse for stay
ing away from school today said
one small boy.
No answered the other. but IL
father delivers the ehastisement I ex-
pect. III have a good excuse for stay
ing away tomorrow"
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12
A Kind Word for CharIev

Il suppose" said the caller, that
your husband expects to win a great
deal of money at the races"
Yes" answered young Mrs. Tork-
ins. Il don't think that for the next
week or two anybody will be able to
accuse Charley Of boarding his
monef"
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

critical condition when ! began with
Doan's Kidney Pills. and they certain
" did wonders for me. Though | am
81 years old. I am as well as the
average woman Of so work well,
eat well and sleep well"
Sold by all dealers. so cents a box
-Milburn Co.. Buffalo. y. Y.
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12
More Merry Woman, Now.

EIcpbs-Don't you ever take your
wife out in your automobile?
Slobbs-I took her out once. but she
screamed so every time l ran over
anybody that 1t made me nervous.
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

50 your father has failed. oh? I
suppose he will have some money
left."
No. everything is gone: have
have nothing left but my beauty
Gee. didn't think It was that
bad t'-IInustou Post
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12
Daily ThouQht.

A little fun.
A little play.
A little laughter
Day by day.
A little school
And we'll confess
a little bit of waywardness.
A little grief
A little woe
As down the later
Years we go.
A little love.
A little strife.
A deal of hope
And this Is life.
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

Never tell evil Of man, IL you do
not know it for certainty. and IL you
know 1t for certainty, thou ask your.
self, Why should / tell itr'-Layater.
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12
WISE FOWL.

First Turkey won't be killed this
Christmas
Second Turkey-Why not?
First Turkey found q bottle OF
antifat yesterday.
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

1t is possible to draw out a man and
make him interesting-but it's differ
ent with a sermon.
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

What does old symper use a cash
register fors He's the only person in
his place OF business that handIes a
cent of the money"
Il know It. but old Symper went
trust even himself"
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12
NEW STRENGTH FOR OLD BACKS.
No Need to Suffer Every Day from
Bsckache.

Mrs. Joannah Straw, 52s North
Broadway. Canton. s. d.. says: For
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12
Suggestive.

Il think Mr.. Grimsbyb attentions
are serious. mamma. says the fair
young thing.
Has he said anything" asks man.
ma.
No; but for a Christmas gift he
has sent me cookbook and a volume
on home decoration. ."-Judge.
Oxford eagle., 1907-12-12

ONLY ONE "BROMO OUINISE-
mat is LAXATIVE BRONO Of-IgINE
ne Signature OF L W. GROvE Ussd IN. W,..s< "a
ever 10 Cure Cold in One Day - -" "ofia