The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-09-24

say" says somebody to me, why
don't you come COP last night, as you
agreed 1 told you dot my bulldog gets
a cObblestone in his eye. und you says
you Will be right oop und fix it. Don't
you know you vhas liar by some
clocks?''
Who you belief I vhas?" I says.
You vhas Darby, der dog doctor, but
you can't doctor no more dogs for me"
I shust get sit down to wonder if der
bulldog gets dot stone out of his eye
when der bell rings again.
Hello, Who vhas dis?''
1T vhas Mrs. Brown Say. doctor,
vhas you coming to see my husband dis
afternoon? 1 belief he vhas worse dan
yesterday. He vhas swearing all der
time. He says if der baby don't keep
quiet he Will knock his head Off Can't
you hurry oOp a leetle?'
You hat make some mistakes" I
saws.
Isn't this the doctor?''
No; dis vhas Hans der Cobbler.''
What, What. Do you mean to tell me
dot cobhler has telephone in his
shooi'
1t vhas so, ma am. und if you hat
some shoes to be fixed oop u
Go AWAY, sir-go AWAY! You
vhas a bad bad man. If you ever
dare to answer me again my husband
shall break your old cObbler shop all
to smash"
I don't like it at all. I vhas going
over to see der druggist und ask him
when melody wrings me oop like a
doorbell und says hello! sixteen times
before I can answer. Den he says:
Hello. Hans, Was dot you?"
Yes; dot vhas me-
Il heard you had got telephone in.
but hardly believed it. 1 vhas glad to
see you getting along so well. Say,
Hans"
Yes"
I have got five pairs of shoes to be
fixed oop."
Good"
But I shall send 'em all to some
Dago cobbler, for you don't know
enough to pound sand"
Dot makes me mad und 1 like to
talk, but he shuts me of before I can
call him liar. Den man walks in
ind says:
"Cobbler. I see you hat a telephone
here?"
Yes, sir
Der telephone vhas a great inwen
tion-a great invention. I stand right
here und speak to a man three miles
AWAY. Does it seem possible? How
did we used to do when we had no
telephones? Hello. Jim! Vhas dot
you p
'she vhas"
''VheI. jim. 1 like to tell you dot
Sarah vhas married last night"
You don't say SOL
''Und you vhas left out in some |
colds. Yes. she vhas married to a
man from Troy
where vhas you speaking to me
from ?" says jim
''Vhy, from a cobbler shop run by
an old Dootchmans on Court street. |
He don't know enough to chew putty. |
and I'll beat him out of the ten cents. |
Think of a cobbler shop having tele- |
phone! Well. goodbye Sorry that
Sarah threw you down.
Look here says to dot man, eff |
you don't pay der ten cents we have
some rows!"
TIA. ia. old MANS he says. und ne
gifts me a pat on der shoulder und |
walks out. Dot makes me mad. und |
] goes by dere telephone book und |
hunts Oop a name und rings oop.
Yes; What is it?' somepody asks.
"Nhas dot Alderman Green's wife %
Yes. What's wanted?"
DO you wear some shoes
"Of course do"
do your shoes need some half-soles |
sometimes? Do you vhant some lift
on der heels or cement patcheS?"
Who vhas dot talking to me % she
says. in mad voice.
1T vhas Hans der Cobbler. make
repairs to your shoes cheaper dan |
anybody else. I hat an uncle who
vhas a tanner. a nephew who makes
shoe pegs and brudder-in-Iaw who |
und so hat advantages over any 9TH
er cobbler. Can 1 do some peesness
nit you today"
Den dot womans speaks to me over
der wire. She says 1 vhas a horse
thief She calls me a william She
wants to put me in jail for a year I
can hear her stamp her foot und
shump oop and down ash she talks
und by und by 1 get so scared dot I
hang oop der receiver und go across
der street for a glass of cold beer |
When comes back dot bell vhas ring
ing to beat der band, und 1 goes und
says:
''Vhell, What you want of me?"
''Vhas you Hans der Cobbler % says
some one.
eft vhas."
'~vhas he der old Dootchmans dot