davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-07-14
KAISER IS MAKING VERY CLEAN SWEEP Personal Adjutants Involved in
 National Scandal DIES WITH A BIG HAND Johann Maschk Drops From His Chair After Drawing Lucky Cards.
 Died as He Had Wished,
 In a Cafe.
DIES WITH A BIG HAND
BY MAlCOM CLARKE.

Special Cable to the Age-Herald. From
 the Hearst News Service. Copyright,
 19O7 by w. R. Hearst)
 Berlin, July 13.-The Kaiser is making almost a clean sweep of his personal en- tourage most of whom are involved in the notorious Euenberg scandals.
 Besides many arlstocratic officers serv- ing the Kaiser as personal "adjutants, Count Hohenau, morganatic cousin of the Emperor. is among the disgraced mo- bles He was discovered by the police to be one of the coterie of prominent men who had dealings with fashionable photographer whose studio was a rem dezvous for unlawful practices.
 Further investigations by the police proved the fact that Hohenau for about five years, since Prince Gutenberg retired from the Embassy of Vienna and took up his residence at Leibenberg, had com- mitted "indiscretions' bordering close on treason. He had communicated copies of important letters and dispatches received by the Emperor to Gutenberg and to NJ. Lecomte, first secretary of the French embassy, another of the studio cotere; alSO lulilSS llt NalScl Hdu Seilu III pIlNdlt on various subjects.
 All this was known to Count Moltle and other men close to the Kaiser but His Majesty was kept in the dark In the meantime Maximillian Harden, the so- cialists writer, commenced his crusade again the "Camarilla," throwing out hints about the questionable morality of these men Finally the crown price laid the matter before the Emperor, and then the whole matter came out.
 Hohenau sent In his resignation. and skipped to England. The Emperor at first refused to accept his resignation, as 1t was his intention to put Hohenau on trial before the military court. But later he changed his mind, and allowed his cousin to go. Count Moltke had to follow, be- cause he had not as was his duty. re- ported to the Emperor what he knew about these "indscretions" of Hohenau's. and Gutenberg was the next in order. Le- comte was recalled by his government
 It Is likely that Count von Hulsen- Haseler, chief of the imperial military cabinet, and very nearly all the per sonal "adjutants" of the Emperor will have to go for similar reasons as Count Moltke. so that general house cleaning will take place.
 An unusually good hand at cards was fatal to Johann Maschik electricity su. perintendent of the Krupp metal works at Berndorf.
 Herr Maschlk was playing "tarok' with party of friends in a cafe. and was dealt exceptionally good cards. He ex- claimed: This Is the best hand of my fife. I go pagat ultimo'' 0he highest stake in the game)
 He had no sooner made this announce ment than he fell from the chair. When his friends raised him he was dead, his weakened heart having succumbed to the excitement of luck at cards.
 To die in the cafe among his friends, with whom he had spent the happiest
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-07-14

would take English manufacturers 9 years months weeks to supply the demand.
 A months accumulation of the mustard wasted daily in London on the edges of plates would suffice to give St. PauPs beautiful coat of primrose paint
 Two cocoanut husks for an adequate life belt. If the husks of all the cocca- nuts in Southern Idia were brought to this country and distributed two husks per man, there would thus be provided a sufficient number of natural life belts to enable two-thirds of the population to be swimming about In the English chan nel at the same time.
 Should some malicious person remove the 5000 volumes in Coimbra library to Madrid, 1t would take 667 students carry ing volume a time and walking twenty miles day years 5 months and weeks 2H2 days to carry them back to Coimbra.
 If all the paraffn lamps made In this country in one year were brought to- gether on Salisbury plain and lit, the heat thus produced, emanatlng from the earths surface, would be sufficient in 1900 years months days to dry up all the minor water courses on Jupiter.
 Twenty million six hundred and seven thousand and ten loads of hay would just be enough to block up the Thames at Blackfriars.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-07-14
SOME SUNDAY MORNING GOSSIP

The poor fellow appeared utterly hope less and unhappy
 He was thin and hungry looking.
 His greasy derby was crushed in sev eral places and but for two large stub born ears would have swallowed his head. His eyes were bloodshot and his mouth worked nervousy. His tie had worked around to the southwest corner of his neck and his collar was unbottoned at the back and was trying to crawl over his hat.
 He had a bundle under each arm, Il large market bag strapped over each shoulder, a basket in one hand, band box in the other, and a basket of toma- toes clamped between his knees.
 His shoes were off style, run down at the heels and the soles were fringed with red clay dried to the consistency of burnt brick
 He was sitting on the curb at the cor ner of First avenue and Twentieth stree. and seemed to be Joking for something. l had compassion on the poor man and stopped to learn his trouble and offer what consolation the circumstances re- qulred.
 Waiting for the ambulance?' l asked.
 No, the hearse why?"
 You look it.'
 ''Do l? Why, am happier today than l have been for a week."
 You don't say?"
 "Yes, I thought I was boisterously joy full but you can hurry up the dead wagon if you happen to meet it down the street"
 "Tell me your trouble.' "Pd rather talk about my happiness. Well"
 "Neighbor Jones wife died yesterday and Cornerlot Smith moved out this morn ing"
 T don't catch the drift"
 Why, don't you understand that l am suburbanite?'
 "Ohn
 T am not acclimated yet. l guess u will be all right when 1 get used to u.
 Poor fellow. Cant you move into town?"
 "roo late. My wife is interested and l can't budge her She seems to enjoy the excitement, and then she is afraid or the things the neighbors might say about us after we are gone. l have tried to get her interested in baseball, the theatre, the Haywood trial, reading yellow journals, dime novels and the history of the Thaw case, but 1t is no use. She chooses to sit all day on the front porch and watch the neighbors. Mister, hold the stopper minute while I take another drink.
 Poor fellow, can't you dope your wife and lead her away in the night?"
 No, she smells and tastes everything before she will take 1t. She has even grown suspicious of me and swears that I am planning her assassination. Say. Mister, did you ever live in the suburbs? 7?
 "Tell me all about your troubles, II 1t is not a family secret
 There are no family secrets in the suburbs That is the trouble, exactly. Your neighbors know all about you and even more than you know yourself.
 "It is this way" he continued, deposit ing some of his bundles In the gutter and on the curb and sharpening match stick to faster his suspenders. I've moved to the suburbs about twelve months ago. We were happy then. We had pleasant. neighborly neighbors, or thought we did. We soon got acquainted and even became familiar with their breakfast menus. They were Just as familiar with our go- ings and comings. This was not unpleas- ant at first and we really liked the pleas
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-07-14
BY WALTER HARPER.

ant familiarity.
 Tt was not long, however, before we were regaled with all sorts of unpleas- ant neighborhood gossip. Gaunt skeie- tons were dragged from private closets and paraded before our eyes with sick ening glee.
 We were surprised to hear from the lips of Mrs. Brown that MT. Jones whipped his wife every night and poked sand in his baby's ears with the garden rake. We heard from the lips of Mrs Jones that MT. Brown was an ex-conVict from Georgia. and that he tied ana gagged Mrs. Brown every Sunday to keep her from going to Sunday school
 Mrs. Wellington Waterloo hastened Tn one morning to warn us against neigh boring with the Jim Smiths, who lived Just behind us on the same block. Smith was infidel and choked his children to sleep every night to keep them from crying for bread. Mrs. Waterloo also, in a careful undertone warned my wife against the Smith girls. All sorts of strange stories had been floating around about them and she was satisfied that there was something wrong.
 Mrs. Smith, during the afternoon of the same day, dropped in to tell Us about the borrowing proclivities of Mrs. We'll ington Waterloo. She warned us that If we did not put a lock and key on every
  of house and home in a month. Now the fact Is Mrs. Smith proved to be the borrower and has cleaned us up of al- most everything in the kitchen but the stove, which she could not move easily. As to the rectitude of the Smith girls We have been unable to discover anything derogatory.
 This sort of thing has gone on now for about a year and there seems to be no end to It. When one theme of scandal frazzles out, another develops to take it's place
 We had congratulated ourselves on our immunity and were really amused in watching the show up to about a month ago, when we heard that I had skipped a bond in Florida for stealing turkeys and that I quarreled with my wife reg ularly One of the neighbors saw me kiss m.' wife good by on the front steps one mcrning and she Is telling the other neighbors with much moral assurance that that is a sure sign that 1 fog her tehind the door,
 There was cramped silence between us for fully five minutes. I could con ceive TO words of consolation that would fit the case.
 Gathering his bundles the frazzled sub urbanite swung onto the inside guard of his car which was already overcrowded with hungry-looking, battered people of his own kind. and disappeared
 l hurried around the corner to get drink of limeade and congratulate my sen on the fact that my own troubles consisted only In two bank notes past due. the cooks leaving yesterday a prospective visit from my mother-in-law next week. two months gas bill due and threatened appendicitis.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-07-14
AN ASTUTE ADVERTISER.
The English Merchant Who Believed
 In Letting the Public Know.

From the Philadelphia Public Ledger.
 The tragic death of MT. Whitely of London, who was the head of the largest store in the world, has recalled to old friends various incidents in his life.
 MT. Whitely advertised ',:- store as a Universal Provider. Hp claimed he could furnish anything that was asked from paper of pms or needles to an ele- phant for he actually had a geological garden, where were many animals for sale.
 One day, says the Worlds Events Mag azine, an old friend called at the store, one whom MT. Whitely had not seen for a long time.
 After the usual greetings, the friend, skipping Mir. Whitely on the shoulder. said You claim, do you not. that your store is universal provider?"
 ''Yes sir l do, and I am positive you cannot ask for anything that 1 cannot provide"
 'I will prove you," said the friend. l want q wife"
 That's all right" was the quick le- sponse. You are in earnest?'
 Surely I am," said the caller.
 Immediately MT. Wlutely called an err rand boy and said: You go to the mil 1inery floor" naming the floor. "and tell Miss c. that l wish her to report to my office at once.'
 Miss C. came and the merchant intr J. duced her to his friend. and said to the young lady: "rhis man has come here for n wife, and I recommend you. To my knowledge he is q god man and rich. Will you marry him?"
 Miss C. was greatly surprised, and after little talk asked for a few days to con- sder and make more acquaintance with the gentleman.
 The couple were married within a week, and so far as the world knows they live happily in London.
 If they are not happy, they keep it to themselves.
 Before the store was ready there was much speculation as to It's success.
 Upon the opening day MT. Whitey was on the alert to see who would be his first customer
 A lady, past middle age, was the first. She bought some choice goods taking them with her, as she wished her mantua- maker to have them quickly,
 She had paid for her goods and was ready to leave the store when MT. Whitoiy stepped to her side and said; ''You are my first customer. l would like to have your name and address. for I wish to send you a present"
 She thanked him, told her name and ad- dress. and asked: Am |, then, the first buyer in this great undertaking? Let IFS prayu She knelt just where she had stood, did the astonisned clerks that were nearby and MT. Whteiy. In @ few earnest words she asked Gods blessing upon them all.
 Each year, as long as the woman lived, when Mir Whltely celebrated the anniver- sary of the opening of his store. he re- membered his first customer with a suit able gift.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-07-14
ODD ARRAY OF FIGURES.
Queer Statistics and Calculations That
 Will Prove Interesting.
From London Punch.

From London Punch.
 If the Aurora Borealis were transplant ed and stuck in the middle of Europe, it would take employment away from $l 75O,- 439 gas workers in France, Germany, Hol- land Belgium, Switzerland, Russia, and Turkey. with a saving of household ex- penditure of ZIP ,5S4,256 13s I'd annually, while the fall in shares would bring star vatlon to 51, 451 men. ,666 women (mar- red and single), and 373,52S children under fourteen years of age.
 The amount of plotting paper that could be turned out of British paper bills. work ing two shifts a week, during 9 years s months weeks would be enough to soak up the Pacific.
 An eminent scientist has calculated that if the agricultural laborers of Great Brit tain would discard hobnail boots in favor of pumps, the manufacture of the latter would provide work for the whole contin- nent of Europe, bar one man. The iron thus thrown aside would suffice to make twelve armored cruisers two-thirds the size of the Black Prince, with plates three-fourths inch thicker
 The quantity of hair exchanged annu- ally would suffice to stuff 999 gross hair pillows, or generate enough ammonia to fill 21 ,2O3 carboys
 If man were to walk on his hands from London to Bournemouth, it would take him seventeen and three-fourths longer than 1t would take a ten-pound salmon to swim from Varstanger Fjord, in Norway, to Calcutta, via the Suez canal.
 The amount of porridge consumed in Scotland during the last three centuries Gncludlng 1900 up to october D would form a lake two and one-fourth times the size of Loch Lomond and three and one- half times as deep
 Supposing a contract were made to sus- pend linen buttons by single strings at distances of six inches along the branches of all the palm trees in Southern India it
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-07-14
No Toe Cream for Dogs.

From the New York Times
 A pretty girl, handsomely gowned and leading a fuzzy poodle, seated herself in front of the soda fountain in a drug store at Twelfth street and Troost ave- nue on recent morning. says the Kan sas City Star.
 "Fll have a caromel nut sundae, please" she told the clerk.
 While the drink was being prepared she contemplated the fat dog which was pant ing audibly with heat and the asthma.
 'I expect you'd better give Roxy, my poodle a dish of chocolate cream. too" she suggested to the mixer of mysterious beverages.
 Beg pardon. ma'am!" he said.
 q said give Roxy, my poodle. dish Of chocolate cream
 Sorry, ma am. but I'm afraid we can't serve dogs"
 Well, of all thingsr exclaimed the young woman indignantly. "I shall cer- tainly never come into this place again. And you can keep your old sundae. too. Come on, Roxey dear"
 And she Haunted out, Roxy panting pro- testingly behind.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-07-14

The peril of doing good to the unlettered mushik is shown by the fate of Alex ander Gruiboff q magistrate of Veronezh province Russia.
 Guribor threw up good position in the ministry of finance in order to live among the peasants, teach them agriculture and educate their children. In order to escape the suspicious of the local authorities. he obtained the post of justice of the peace.
 The peasants met him distrustfully. Hearing that he had served the govern ment they treated him as a spy and agent provocateur. He persisted in his good work in the determination to gain their confidence.
 For three years Gruiboff acted as un- paid adviser in agricultural matters, as lawyer doctor. veterinary surgeon. aud even as dsinterested money-lender. He succeeded in getting many of the peas ants to abandon the pernicious three field" system of tillage and to raise new and more profitable crops.
 Finally he decided that the peasants must be supplied with American blows Zemstvo Council to sell the blows on credit The council complied. Agricu- ture hourished. but the muZhiks neglected to pay their debt.
 A fight with the debt collector and his guard was the result. Two peasants were wounded. The enraged villagers con- vinced that Gruiboff's benefactions were a government trick to destroy them. raid cd and burned his house. tied him to d tree and riddled his body with bullets.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-07-14
The Humiliation of Our Fisheries.

CFrom Appletons Magazlne.)
 One Of our foremost national industries bids fair to be wiped out of existence. and this with hardly glance of atten- tion given to 1t from the country at large. l refer to the fisheries of the eastern coast, and In particular to the mackerel cod and lobster fisheries. They are in such danger of extermination, that unless prompt and radical protective measures are taken, 1t will not be long before these fish, like the buffalo, will be only a memory.
 Along the eastern coast all the way from Provincetown to Eastport, depop- ulated towns and rotting and unused fish wharves mutely bear witness to this deporable fact Od-time shippers. men who have sadly noted the steady de- crease of the catches year after year. know the condition of these fisheries, but they have said nothing, probably because they have had no means suggested to them whereby to proclaim the fact The fish barons in Boston and Gloucester know the real facts, but they have said nothing because it was against their in- terests to have the facts become generally known. More than this. they have stout iy denied, right in the face of the facts that the fish were steadily decreasing in numbers. These vessel owners and wholesalers and packers know the true condition of things. but they realize that protective measures would decrease their revenue.
 We Americans consume without re- plenishing. We reap where we have not sown The trees of our country have been So recklessly felled to provide pulp for the making of paper, that publish CTS are anxiously speculating as to the source of supply for the near future.
 Less than a half century ago. the buff faloes dotted the western plains by mill Hons. John Beach Master, in sis His tory of the United States" says that m H7l-72, more than 100000 buffaloes were
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-07-14

Attractive ads. aro Illustrated. La1 tGe Gawk mako your illustrations Age-HeraId Building. li$sBfE
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-07-14
hours of his life, had been a wish eX pressed by Herr Maschik.

The Kaiser who has heard of the gre3- automobile racing track at Brooklands. England will not rest unuti Germany has the biggest, best and completest autome- bile track in the world He is determined to make Germany the Mecca of the Mo tor world"
 Privy Councillor Fritz von Friedlandec. the coal king and a leading organizer of auto races in Germany has been entrusted by the Emperor with the task of finding the money for the worlds motor track.
 Herr von Friedlander says: "Tbe Kaiser has conceived the idea of building a race track where it shall be possible for a great concourse of spectators to watch a classic motor event during it's entiro progress, while doing away with the dan gers of such races now entailed by using the public highways"
 Although the location of the auto drome" has tot been settled, the most favorable site suggested Is the Lune- burger Heath, between Hamburg and Hanover.
 An echo of a notorious political intrigue, which ended with the banshment of the beautiful Baroness Schonberger from Austria, is the arrest and Imprisonment of her husband for forging her name on bills.
 The baroness was employed by the hostile Hungarian ministry to act the spy in Vienna by using her charms to win state secrets from Austrian ministers and to worm out of them the Emperor's pri- vate views on the crisis. She was too successful in this, but was unable to re- cover from the Hungarian diplomats the promised reward of $5O,000.
 Her neer do well husband, the baron, is now doing a six months term of inn prsonment He was no longer able to call upon the baroness for financial aid. since she had ruined herself with the heavy expenses of her intrigue at Vienna. While earning a scanty living by driving a cab the baron had attempted to raise the wind by using his wifes name on bills, but soon got Into the clutches of the law.
 Before his marriage the baron had had a large fortune. which he rapidly ran through in eXtravagances of various kinds. He and the baroness had been separated for some time.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-07-14
They Looked Alike.

From the New Y ork Times.
 Mistaken identity and extraordinary re- semblance have always done yeoman serv- ice in literature and the drama, but they find time, nevertheless, to make trou- ble in real life also. Take. for instance the true story of man who sailed from England to New York not very long ago. with just enough money to arrive decently at his destination.
 He calculated with minute exactness just how much he would have to give for tips to the various useful denizens of the steamer. He would have just enough left, he thought, to land in New York and take a cab to the address of the nearest friend in need.
 Somewhere around Sandy Hook he took the few sovereigns remaining to him-he had been very abstemious in the smoking room-and started out to find stewards. He gave the customary fee to the dining room steward and the deck steward and the bedroom steward and the bath stew ard-so he thought. But, just as he was about to get on the gangplank, a smiling Englishman waylaid him.
 "Oh-er-Fm the bath steward" he said, irrelevantly touching his cap.
 "But-but-'' began the impoverished passenger.
 The bath steward cut him short with a knowing smile and these words:
 "Oh, sir, the bedroom steward and I, we looks very much alike"
 What was there to do?
 Heavens No V nder the bedroom stew ard had been wreathed in smiles ever since Sandy Hook
 The poor passenger had to walk to the home of the friend in need.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-07-14
Quite a Heroine.

From the Philadelphia Press.
 Really said the coy girl. T think I'm entitled to a Carnegie medal I saved a life the other evening"
 "The ideal" exclaimed her friend. "Whose''
 Jack Hanson's; he said he couldn't live without me-
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-07-14
The Loa-Rollinq.

Log-rolling is still popular in politics and legislation out the good oldfashioned custom that gave birth to the institution Is fast going out of use among the people who originated 1t.
 The old time log-rolings in North Ala bama with a big country dinner as a waysido adjunct and a free for all frolic to wind up with at night, Is dear mem ory that many of us old hill-bllys will never forget
 But with the development of the coun-
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-07-14
Use Pasteurized Milk.
 Gridley-Lee Dairy Go. 312N 21st St. Both Phones.

Several solitaire diamond Tiffany rings for sale, cheap. Call Monday morning 1914 Morris avenue.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-07-14
Read Up!---Keep Posted!

Now the of prices Like the wideawake farmer you should study the conditions and reap harvest from the best field at