Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-03-23

| their friends The result was that the
| telephone lines were kept busy all day long.
There Is no telling how many women heard
the joke during the forenoon hours, and
| number Of husbands returning home for
the MONDAY lunch were greeted at the door
with the conundrum, and before they were
allowed to place their feet under the din
ing room table they had to guess the an
swer"
"weI, what was the conundrum?" asked
the listening friend.
"Oh." said the narrator, at was this:
If Roosevelt Is President with his clothes
on what Is he with his clothes Off"
There was pause, and then before the
listener could make any reply the Iowan
calmly knocked the ashes of his cigar and
said:
Teddy bearl"
X u X X
He has gray hair and wears glasses, and
one could never tell from his sad and re-
signed expression that he makes a living
writing merry quips. modern verbal salies
and up-to-date jokes for very silly public
to chortle over. Tother afternoon he was
| fixing up to go home having done a days
work upholStering several dozen WORKOUT
mental jollties when Gwendolyn-folks say
they're almost engaged, though he hash
bought the ring yet-breezed into his office.
"Graciousv' she cried from the doorway,
have you heard the terrible news?"
The professional humorst glanced up,
saw that something terrible was the mat
ter. and looked big question.
Harry. my brother, has been arrested"
"Holy Smoke" cried the gray-haired per-
son in establishment and dismay, what on
earth for?"
For beating an egg" dear Gwendolyn
replied. with a continuous performance
giggle.
speak, but he just looked. and looked, and
looked. And finally. when the waves and
! ripples and eddies Of gggles had all died
| away, he sighed.
| Gwendolyn's eyes in the most impersonal
| way. I'm very glad you said that. could
| marry anybody but an idiot and an amateur
| in my own line of business"
The engagement rumor has died a natu-
| raj death.
There has not yet been appointed any d.
| rector for the geological survey. and Col.
| Charles D. Walcott. who has been elected
| secretary of the Smithsonian. is still hold
| ing down both jobs and spending part of
| his time at each building. One of the work
ers IN one of the institutions-ft is not nee
essary to say which-called the other day
on one OF the workers in the other. and they
were just exchanging the time of day. Said
the one:
"Well. how's your shop getting on now?'
Zine" said the other; but it's the first
time in my experience that | ever had the
pleasure of working for a bifurcatcd boss"
Just then Col. Walcott walked in the door.
and pattng him on the shoulder, said:
"Glad to see you. It's the first time l ever
heard myself described that way; but l be-
Heve. under all the circumstances, the de-
Scription fits.
John NJ Lee, who appeared as counsel in
the carbohydrates murder case at Cul-
pepper Va short while ago. has many
friends in this city. Upon the occasion of
a recent visit here he related story to
show how strong Is his love for children.
What made you pick up that child?'
he had been asked by a friend who saw
him embrace a little urchin.
"Only because I'm fond of the little ones"
was the admission of the sturdy Virginian
Two men had been arrested for entering
barn, slaughtering calf and dividing 1t, y
he related when asked concerning the incl
dent, land when they came before the court
they elected to be tried separately. One of
them was tried, convicted and given SEN
tence of three years. Then came the other
defendant against whom there was exactly
| the same proof that had caused the convic-
| ton of his companion. The testimony had
| been heard and 1t was time for the argu-
ment to be made. So far as l was concern
| ed the matter Of argument was trifling
| one. l thought that a talk of five minutes
| would settle the case and get it off the
| docket.
And so I got up to make my little
| speech, but l soon found that 1 was unable
| to speak. Just as l was about to address
| the court and jury turned my head toward
| the defendant to single him out from 9TH
ers, and seated at his side was poor Wom-
| an, her clothing of the cheapest material.
| But the sight of the woman did not at
| feet me in the least
Looking little further he added, SOL
| EMMY, Il saw little tot resting across the
lap of the woman From one side hung the
head of the little one. showing the dirty
face, and from the other side the dirty little
feet were hanging. The sight proved too
much lump came in my throat and 1
was unable to utter word. l sat down,
rested my head upon the table and finally
told the court l could say nothing. Counsel
for the prisoner had nothing to say. and the
father of that little child soon walked from
the court free man"
Having recovered from his novel expert
ence, Lee congratulated the man, his wife
and the baby. Then he went to Richmond
to tell Gov. FitZhugh Lee of his conduct.
II was frank with the governor" said the
former prosecutor. and when 1 had fin
ished relating the story of what happened
In court that day L asked that the governor
pardon the man who had been convicte I"
The governor granted the request
Police.