davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
The Plot AgaInst Oklahoma.

From the Springfield Republican.
The plot TO hold up the Oklahoma con-
s,itution and prevent the admission Of the
State before the next Presidential cleo
tion IS clearly in process Of being carried
out. and the plant which is engineering il
.is located in Washington rather than in
Oklahoma. The ustcnsible reason is that
the constitution has gerrymandered the
State in favor Of the Democrats. which is.
Of course. very shocking to Republican
ideas of pTopTiety such a thing as a Re
publican gerrymander never having been
known. But the real reason is that the
new State would probably fall into Demo
cratic possession and add seven votes Of
that political color 20 the electoral college
a year from next fall II It had been sup
posed that Oklahoma would prove to be so
strongly Democratic, the last Congress
would have withheld its enabling ordl-
nance at least until after the next Presi-
dentia, election. New States are desirable
only as they are Republican in politics.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
Editor Mack and His Mail.

From the Springfield Republican.
Norman +. Mack, the Buffalo newspa-
per man, is taking a trip abroad, and has
been unwise enough to have his mail fol-
low him. Having remained a while in
London. he pushed on to Paris, and from
thence ordered his mail, which had been
arriving al the Carlton. forwarded. There
was weeks accumulation Of letters. cir
culars, and newspapers. until under the
mail counter was pile of ii large enough.
it is said, to fill two bushel baskets Mr.
Mack's direction as to forwarding was
faithfully followed. and it proved to be an
expensive job TO him. According to Eng
lish postal laws. all matter forwarded
later than twelve hours after delivery is
charged for again at the usual rate Of
postage. So we live and learn
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
Mnrse Henry and His Riddle.

If we did not love Marse Henry more
than we can tell we would roast him 10
brown turn for the muss he has kicked
up with his dark horse for 1905. He has
been aggrovatiasly cryptic ever since he
returned from his philOsophic musings az
the tombs Of the ancients in Europe.
Even his parts of speech are almost as
confused as they are confusing. He has
set the whole pack of pert paragraphers
by the ears, and they are after him In
full cry. He has given us all nervous
headaches by the task involved in the
guessing Of his riddle. OF his arbitrary
line. he vouchsafes 20 us only its latitude,
leaving US 10 guess its length. Does it
extend beyond the Mississippi? II it does,
we can name his man in one guess: but
until he gives us definite information on
this point We shall not whisper the name.
But if II does not extend beyond the Mis-
sisslppi. then we tell Marse Henry, in the
chaste yernacular Of the suburbs Of lou
isville. that there aIn't no such man
Leastwise. we know not OF him. and we
have a fair to middliHg acquaintance.
We have thought Of the Hon. Judson
Harmon as the possible key TO Mr.. Wat
terson's riddle. Mr.. Harmon was Attor-
nev General Of the United States In the
wreck OF matter and the crash Of worlds
that followed the Democratic national
convention of 1896 But did he stand firm
as "a good organization Democrat, who
supported the ticket in that tremendous
cataclysm? We know that Uncle Adlai
Stephenson did. but Uncle Adlai, dis
tinguished kinsman Of Marse Henry. is
now seventy-two years old, and seems
content 10 pursue his amiable perigrina-
tons around the large circle Of his South
ern kiufolbs, the while eschewing politics
and politicians. a mighty good Demo
crat is Uncle Adlai and a Christian. We
esteem him all the more because he is
related 20 Marse Henry; but We doubt
his sprinting qualities.
II Mr.. Wa1terson will Oblige by telling
us If bis arbitrary line reaches TO the
broad Pacific, we will guess his riddle in
three shakes of a Sleeps tail.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
Too Many "VEIfeans'
From the Chicseo Chronicle.

From the Chicago Chronicle.
As might have been expected. other
'Faljeans' are turning up in various
parts Of the country 20 request executive
clemency because of good behavior since
breaking out OF jail. Wisconsin furnishes
one and Missouri another. Several other
States will no doubt be heard from in due
time, and, Of course, the January case
will furnish the necessary precedent for
pardonlng all the petitioners. The whole
thing suggests the thought that as all the
jail-breakers seem to reform, it might be
advisable to give every convict the chance
to escape, and thus become a moral and
law-abiding citizen. That is the logic Of
the proposition, anyway
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

the whim-Of the President was fully
established in the abortive attempt to I'm
peach Andrew Johnson. That he can lay
no claim to any official rights. powers,
privileges. or immunities whatsoever was
settled when Congress. upon the recon-
mendation of Grover Cleveland, repealed
the tenure-o of-ofice act which Cleveland
sonorously observed had fallen into
'innOcuous desuetude."
We hope we have thoroughly exploded
the absurd notion, which has found lodg-
ment in a multitude of minds throughout
the length and breadth Of the land. that
the President Of the United States is in
any sense obligated to summon Cabinet
meetings at stated times.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
Works for Love of Il.

WOrthngton Ford belongs to that class
OF rich men who have dTifted into the
public service for sheer love Of the work.
At present he holds the comparatively in
conspicuous position Of chief Of the manu-
script division OF the Library OF Congress.
lie was chief Of a bureau IN the Treas
ury Department until the oXigenCies Of
Ohio politics in the Mckinley regime
caused pressure to be brought 10 bear
upon him to retire Mr. Ford is a mem
Der Of the well-known New York family
Of that name. and one Of his brothers
was the novelist Paul Leicester Ford
whose tragic death a few years ago
shocked the country. WOrthingtou Ford
has q highly developed literary taste, and
contributes a good deal TO the better class
the rule of government employees IN
Washington In that he is so enamored Of
his work and or life generally here that
Ia does not take the annual vacation al
lowed by law. He lives IN a handsome
residence tn Cleveland Park. and prefers
90 stay there through the hot summers
90 going 10 seashGre or mountains. There
is perhaps a touch Of acrid irony In Mr.
Ford s. sending 20 the jamestown Expo
siti0n among the manuscripts contributed
10y the Library Of Congress. an autograph
letter Of President McKinleys. in which
the martyred President, while a member
gi Congress. had pleaded somewhat i'm
Fortunately Tor an Office for q constituent
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

which II is used. but it should not be set
up as anything in the nature OF scare
crow. It simply viii bring ridicule and
contempt upon the judges who attempt 1t.
and prove a terrific boomerang In the
hands Of any masculine person who seeks
10 use IL as a club
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
Browns,tme Erlsode Responsih1e, !,

From the Concord N. H. Monitor.
The Brownsville episode is held in Bal
tmore to be responsible for the Demo-
cratic success in the recent city election.
The negroes, Il Is asserted, refused 10
go to thepolls because Of their resentment
and the Republican vote fell off enough 70
give Mahool the election. There are sew
eral Northern States where the negro
vote. chiefly Republican. is numerous
enough to swing an election. In Ohio.
for instance. there are 10000 colored
voters; indiana has nearly as MANY.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
MEN AND THINGS.
The OmcinI Trust-burterr

Frank B. Kellogg and Cordenie A.
Severance continue to be the Presidents
real trust-busters They have been law
partners at ST. Paul many years. and up
10 the time Of his death Senator Cushman
K. Davis was a member Of their firm.
Their practice has been mainly for cor
porations. their biggest client for several
years having been the great steel trust,
whose interests In Minnesota are poten-
TALLY more vast than even in the Pitts
burg district Messrs. Severance and
kellogg were brought into the trust
busting business for the government by
Senator Knox when he was Attorney
General and they have been retained by
his successors. They do their work
quietly. They have no official title or
standing, They are merely lawyers en-
ployed by the government TO prepare
cases against designated trusts under the
forms and regulations Of the Department
Of Justice. They are paid from the ex-
tra0rdinary grant Of Il half million dol
lars made by Congress three years ago
upon the recommendation OF President
client, just as the steel trust was in Min
nesota. What fees they are paid by the
government Is no more known than was
the compensation they used to draw from
the steel trust. As, however, they are
high-priced lawyers. II is believed that
the government is paying them for their
services more than any of the big trusts
I'm the country pay their lawyers one
suggestion is that they are 10 receive 80
900 each for this years work.
AZ. Kellogg, by the say has political
ambitions Ii is said ,haJ in the event
Of Attorney General B0naParte's retire
ment the President would put the Mime
sotan at the head Of the Department Of
Justice From this Office Mr.. Kellog1
might be able 10 go 10 the Senate as Sen
ator Clapp's successor. 1t is known that
the Senate is his goal.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
A LITTLE NONSENSE.
FOR LUNCH.

Said the man at the first table:
l would not eat as women do;
They are a very foolish crew,
Waiter, bring me two chocolate
cclairs, some mixed pickles, glass
Of milk. and a charlotte russo
Said the girl at the second table;
Men pose as intellectual kings.
But, my, They call for silly things
Waiter. bring me two chocolate
eclairs. some mixed pickles, a glass
of milk, and a charlotte russo.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
Whom the spring nas. Come.

When the spring days come an the jay
birds raise a row.
The poet VIII be singin' 70 the mules
that pun the plow.
"Ger-haw, Git alougr
tWe know 'em by that s0ng1
"Gee-haw. Git along"
When tie spring days come an the fields
are l00kln' prime.
Oh. it's then thsr's lots o. reason in the
ploWiu' poets rhyme.
With It's "Gee-haw, Cit along"
tWe know him by that s0ngy
"Gee-LaW. Git alOug,'
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
Life in The Settlement.

"Pullin Green come mp from GRANVILLE
yesterday. Pulin is a gay bird. He heard
all about that phantom party Miss EssIe
is Eoiu to give.
Social JinKins is in our midst once
more. Social, old boy. You have our sin
cerest sympathies Miss Katie left two
hours before your train come in."
Ross Struthcrs is l0Okin' mighty
anxious these days. Never mind Ross.
old boy, the old folks are quite winin..
Just sail in an win"
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

Marse Henry says the Democratic plat
form must be short and crisp" The ad-
vice IS rendered in some four or five
short and crisp columns in the Louisville
Courier-JOurnal.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
Texts from Brother Dickey.

To some folks. truth Is Ike a rocl,
in de sea; dez ~ soon q dey sees # dey
makes fer deep water.
Satan IS levyiu' on So much er de worl'
dat purity soon de Saints won't have
standln' room ter boiler halieluia,
a hundred years frum now de folks
in de worI' viii De cutun dc grass on
yo' grave en- soliiu il fer hay. so live.
dat we.en dat time come you'll be in de
milk en- honey business whar you won't t
keer.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
4 Condition Precedent.

From the Tcrt Worth Record.
The magazines are full OF suggestions Of
how TO furnish bungalow And many
anxious readers are awaiting the maga-
zine that will tell how to secure Z. .bunga-
low to furnish.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
Cutting Him on.

"Ah, I see that another Of Mr.. Car
negies young men-
John" interrupted is wife, Il posi-
lively Will not listen 70 anything OF a
scaudalous nature"
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
Seminole War Survivors.

How many veterans Of the Seminole
war are alive2 That Indian uprising was
put down seventy years ago. and two or
three communities are now claiming the
distinction Of having citizens who par
tIcipated ia IT, Away out al Watrous.
y. Mex. there is a venerable and worthy
patriarch named Madison Horn. whose
neighbors boast that he IS the sole sur
rivur Of the Florida war. lie IS eighty
eight. and as spry as cricket At West
Palm Beach. Fla, there is a certain
Judge Andrew Jackson LeWis-born in
South Carolina, by the way-who bears
honorable scars as the result of wounds
received while he was fighting as a pri-
yate tn the ranks Of q South Carolina
regiment against the Seminoles. Judge
Lewis Is eiEhty-nine. and although he
fought four years IN the Confederate
army be looks strong and active enough
% shoulder his gun again and keep step
70 the drums tap. One unidentified vet
eTan is being presented by Indiana. but.
as the HO0s.ers have not vet published
his name OF shown by the records that
DE is drawing a pension. their claim Is
being fiouted by Florida and New Mexico.
If there is a Seminole war survivor I'm
This city, be will please come forward
with the proof. Kansas is expected soon
10 enter the list.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
DisgruntIed Press Agent.

What's that?"
I say it's nothing but an artfully ad-
vertised aggregation Of antiquated acts.
apathetic animals, and fossiliZed freaks %
"Oh, you've left the circus. have you?'
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
The GalInnt Funston.

From the Teuc Haute Tribune
Gen. Funston, in cheerfully yielding his
right TO promotion to a brother or1cer.
was just as gallant as when he was
chasing Aguinaldo.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
Value of immigration Laws.

From the Indianapolis News
The breaking Of the immigration record
every month nowadays rather makes one
wonder what would have been doing If
Congress had passed no restrictive laws.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

Il seeps a pity that Mr.. Nicholas Long
worth does not reside IN Wisconsin. II
that were the case. he might be elected
Senator to succeed Mr.. Spooner, and thus
leave Mr.. Foraker undIsturbed
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
Too Many Cooks.

From the Chicago Evening Pest.
Some shrewd old political chefs might
think there were too many cooks stirring
the Taft broth in Ohio.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
A Hunk of History.

Porus. one Of Persia's kings,
one Of Asia S masters.
For his name won added fame
By invenung plasters.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
should Include Schneider

From the Cleveland Plain Dealer
The statue of Joseph Jefferson is to
be completed and ready for unveiling a
year from next June. Let's hope il will in
clude a bronze duplicate OF my dog
Schneider.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
1t Is Remarkable.

Everybody seems TO have money to
hand me, remarked the beef magnate.
ME. too" Chimed In the ice maEnate.
Sometimes l wonder where they get
Il all"
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
DiVnrcOns.
Years had passed.

Years had passed.
Well. well. Janet" exclaimed the re-
turned hero. still n miss?'
Not still, replied the kittenlsh heroine.
Again"
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
The Secret NTUaic.

In the chill sod the seed is uursed.
To bloom and brightness srriuging;
Let all the st0rm-Winds wall their worst:
Thank God. the heart is singing,
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
Opened Too EarIy.

From the Detroit Free Press
Another plot to assassinate the Gar has
been uncovered Both baseball and bomb
throwing have suffered from early open
ings
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
AlnlONf.

Prem the Augusta ga. Chronicle.
Owing to a snowstorm the sun has not
shone in Southern Wyoming for nearly a
month. That's almost as bad as living in
Pittsburg.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
sat,srip,ioa Rate. BY Mail.

No cttcrtion tciH be paid 10 anonymous
contributions, and no COMMUNICATIONS TO
the editor UiH be printed Except oUeT the
HGme Of the tCriter.
Manuscripts offered far publication tciH
be returned If uuGraildbls. but stamp0
should be sens tCith the manuscript for
that purpose.
AH Communications intended for this
newspaper, tChCthcT for the daily or the
Sunday issue. should be addressed 10
THE ASHINGTON HERALD.
New YORK Office au-I.eskman Bldg. LaCoste a
Msxwel Managers
Chicaso Office. Marquette Bldg. LaCoste & Ajax.
well. Managers
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
EYuIafuPd

From the Cleveland Leader.
A Connecticut fisherman claims to have
seen a red-headed deyil-fish which stood
on its tail and Kissed at him. Too much
bait
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
Wrong MnferlnIs

Williams is getting up a literary club. "
Hickory is the only kind thatH ever
bring him to his success said the Old
man.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

From the way those folks are acting
over in Spain. some people might be led
10 believe that something new has really
happened" says the Bay City (Mich.)
Times Well, isn't the little Prince of
the Asturias new?
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

Il IS pointed out that Hon. Charles
Warren Fairbanks was born I'm ohio
Without some sort of Ohio trimmings. a
Presidential possibility IS really an i'm
possibility just at this time
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
Ample Room.

Mollie's writ a letter home
From whar the oceans sloshin'.
This here pond is big enough
For all to go in washin"'
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

The difference between what a captain
Of industry does know in the newspapers
and the magazines and what he doesn' Z
know on the witness stand would I'll
several libraries.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
Would Itl
LIN, IL nhio Gu

From the Ohio Sun.
Would It be safe to say the drug trust
received a Knockout drop in that IN
dianapulis Federal court decision?
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
Sensation.

More trouble in high life"
what now?"
"a New York millionaire deserts his
club for his home"
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

No exposition Of the past was ever
visited twice by the President. but the
jamestown show will be able To claim
that distinction after Georgia Day. Il
should be remembered. I'm this connection.
that Powhatan. one Of the original James
townites. was great advocate Of big
stick methods.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
The Better Way.

) way Of escape has been devised
From the deepsea submarine;
But It doesn't compare with the other plan
Preferred by the average sort Of man,
To ride ii & land machine.
Philadelphia Ledger
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
4 Big Hole.

From the Baltimore san.
They seem TO have left a hole in the
rallroad-rate bill big enough to drive a
wagon through.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

Senator Platt again hands out the old
joke about Mr.. Roosevelt stealing the
ten commandments. 1t is absolutely
certain. however, that he didn't steal
them from the Senator.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

A scientist claims 10 have discovered
a product Of the sunfower that is a fine
substitute for quinine, and far cheaper
Too bad for the patent medicine takers
that this was not discovered before the
pure food law went into effect
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

Some men would rather be wrong than
acknowledge it says Mr.. Bryan. The
trouble with that sort Of epigram is that
it invariably means some ether men"
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

Philadelphia Ledger.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

The arresting Of mere dukes, ambassa-
dors, and other nabObs must be getting
weariSOme TO Town Marshal Collins, Of
Glen Echo An occasional king OF en-
peror might EarY the monOtnnv.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

It's for him We've been a-pinin'-
Take him u the store.
Don't lis face look round an shinin?-
Dollars at the door.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

And TO think, too, that "Pete" was
whipped by a dog with such a molly
Goldfish name as "Rollo"
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

Wonder where he's been a-stayin'-
Leaving us so poor?
There Is now no time for playin'-
Dollar al the door
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

The ceremony incident to the Christen-
ing of the little Spanish prince viii con-
tiuue for two days Christening a boy
with twelve names is a strenuous under
taking
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

when the cardinal rays Of the setting
sun flood the forests. fields and spires
Of earth with golden glory, the soul scars
into the fading light and rercls in a
dream OF immortality says the Balti-
more American. Fine, A regular sun
burst OF suncrccstatic sentiment.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

An English girl has Just won the cham
pi0nship Of her country by putting an
eight-pound shot 81 feet and S inches.
The men may just as well quit
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

Although "booed" by the London gal
lery gods because Of his impersonstion
Of Henry VIII, Mr.. S0thern Is said to
have been perfectly calm and smiling.
and not 10 have lost his head for an
instant" Had Bluff King HaT' been
alive ana a witness to the performance.
the actor probably would have lost his
head for good
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

Pete Roosevelt has been thrashcd
within an inch of his life by a homely
looking cur" Saws the birmingham Age
Herald Alas. poor Pete we know him
Well once he was q hero, now he is
has-been. Every dog has his day; and
'sPete's" Is I'm the past
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17
JUST FROM GEORGIA.
From the Atlanta Constitution,
DOLLARS AT THE DOOR.

Hope within the heart is springln-
Seldom there before.
Don't you hear the dollar ringln'-
Ring.n' at the door?
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

Published Every Morning in the Year by
THE WASHINGTON HERALD COMPANY.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

The lukewarm and opposition paper!
refer 70 him as William Howard Taft
The roOters call him Bill"
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

May is a pretty nice month. after alh'
saws the indianapolis News. Yes, after
all the others.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

The Austin Statesman is Dragging about
the fine pumpkins raised IN that vicinity
We have no doubt that an Austin pump
kin has a Houston strawberry beaten a
thousand miles.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

"Hoch der Kaiser. Auf Wicdersehen. %
says the Charleston News and Courier. at
the closing Of the schuetz7ufest When q
real CuarIegtoulan sets out 90 make one
feel at home, ne goes all the Eaits.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

A Chicago thief recently stole fifteen
rhUbarb pies. II Lo ate them, his punish
ment doubtless fitted the crime
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

20 write poetry And this country has
been mighty good 90 William Allen. too.
The Washington herald., 1907-05-17

King ChulilouEkoru claims 90 be a
brother TO the moon As a matter of
fact, the moon hardly could be more than
q distant relative.