Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1907-01-18
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II
OF our servant girls TO China. Niles
What forl Glles--ro smash It.-,-Chl.
cago News,
Author-Could you give me an ap-
propriate motto tor my essay ON sea
voyageY Traveler-Yes; "sle transit"
baltimore American,
Archie Is fairly going crazy over
his new automobile" That's strange,
Every time I've seen him he has been
going crazy under it."--Chlcago rrlD'
une
MlstreSs-Yoa can't entertain your
company In the parlor. Brldget-ol
can't Why. mum, dldn't yea hear
him laughiu' ut 10 shplity--New York
| sun.
THE man marry" declared Miss
Elder, must BE- capable ot great self
sacrihCe." Yes" murmured Miss
Younger. "he'll have to be, be,'--Clcveland
Leader.
Motto over the walls OF u school In
Germany; when wealth Is lost, moth
ing Is lost" when health Is lost.
something is lost" when character
is lost, all Is lost"
ut seems his uncle fell out OF hotel
window In Europe-----" GRACIOUS !!
Any bones brokenr' Not one" Nor
mo. he was merely drowned. 1t hap
pened In Venice" Philadelphia
Ledger.
why In the world did Snlgssley
want to marry his divorced wife
againY at seems that she'd saved up
all the alimouy he paid her during tho
years they lived apart. Rec
ord-lleraid,
Wite-I caught Bridget starting tho
fire this morning with paraliine, John.
llusband-llow much do We owe herr
Wlfe--Four months wages husband
Well, let her go ON With the paraf.
tine.--Cllpped.
Anxious Parent--Doctor, my daugh'
ter appears To be going blind, and she
Is about TO be married. Doci0r--Let
her 10 right ON with the wedding, II
anything can open her eyes, marriage
wlll.-Stray Stories.
There goes woman with his
tory" remarked the clerk In book
store. as lady passed out at the front
door How do you know?" quericl
the proprietor. Because explained
the clerk, Il Just sold It to her. CHI.
cago Daily News.
IIousemald--l'm goln' TO leave you,
mum. I'm goln' to work for Mrs.
Monk. an would you give me good
reference, muml Mlstress-To work
for Mrs. Monk Certainly; I'll give
you a glowing reference. | hate that
womau.-Sclssors.
II am afraid, madam" said gen.
tleman who was looking for country
lodgings, "that the house IL too near
the station to be pleasant" ut Is Il
little noisy" assented the landlady,
but from the front veranda one has
such fine view OF people who miss the
trains "-Tlt-Blts.
"Ow remarked the first fox hunter,
you should have seen MIR. Nurltch
take that high hedge" "Iou surprise
me-" exclaimed the other. Il thought
the horse he rode wasn't much of Il
Jumper" "Oh! the horse didn't take
the hedge. Mr.. Nuritch did It alone.'
Philadelphia Press.
His Coachman-Professo why Is II
that the moon allus shows the same
face? The PrOfessor-That Is due to
the circumstance that its revolution
upon Its axis Is colncIdent with the
revolution 1t makes in Its orbit. The
oachman-Thankee. | thort 1t was
somethln' like that.-ChIcago Tribune.
"I thought" said Mrs. OIdcastle,
"that you intended to have D'Auber.
the great mural painter do some work
for you" 1--WE did" replied her host
ess, "but Josiah discharged him. He
tried to cheat US by paIntln' on the
walls. | s'pose because he didn't want
to spend any money for canvas,"-Chi'
cago Record-Herald.
''They say you get $50 marks a
month. can't believe It; tell me
how" ~ get 110 marks salary; then
don't pay my rent, 40 marks; that's
! $50 marks; owe the mllbman 30
marks, that's 1870 marks; my butcher
40 marks, 20 marks, and every month
raise 30 marks out Of my friends,
makes an income of $50 marks a
month !'-Fllegende Batter
Polite, but
| "Good-rnorninp. ma'am," said Willie.