The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1907-04-22
THE EXAGGERATED EGO.
Quaint and Curious Cases Of Persons
Who Have IL.
Oouisvilie Courier-Journal

LOUISVILLE Codr1er-Journal)
When a gentleman residing in the
mountains of eastern Kentucky lets mis-
mind dwell upon the cussedness of his
neighbor until he decides that the man
is too mean to live, and, squatting be-
hind stump. awaits the neighbor's
passing and inflicts capital punishment
upon him by placing bullet from a
forty five somewhere among his vi
tails. the executioner must be held
blameless. He has the exaggerated
ego.
When a jealous husband Eliminates
upcn his imagined wrongs until he de-
cides to strange his wife with the cord
that holds back the portieres in the par
Tor, and accomplishes his purpose, he
is not a criminal, but temporarily
maniac He has the exaggerated ego.
Whers an anarchist decides that the
head of a government is unworthy TO
rule, and that he is appointed by Provi-
dence to put him out of business with
an Internal machine, and SO explOdes
ten pounds of dynamite under his car
riage, distributing the head of the gov
eminent over the immediate vicinity.
he is blameles. He has the exaggerated
ego.
When man is in love with maid
who is in love with another man, and
decides that the other man should be
held by he beard while a knife IS
iabbed under the fifth rib, to the end
that he shall cease to incumber the
earth, and, procuring a reliable and
trustworthy knife, releases his rivals
spirit from the clay carcass wherein IL
has abided. he is without fault. He has
the exaggerated ego.
When a man is convinced that the
country is going to the bow-wows be-
cause the economic theories of the par
ty in power are at fault, and decides
that ne must guard the liberty of the
man sitting upon the key of nails near
est the stove in the nearest crossroads
department store. he is not guilty of
making his wife take in washing to
support him. He has the exaggerated
ego.
When a man appropriates unto him.
self the bottom step of the car. and,
spreading his arms like the wings of the
eagle in full flight, prevents other pas
sengers from getting off in the middle
of the block, and then, after waiting
until the car has come to full stop.
steps down into the street in leisurely
manner. without looking over his Shout
der to see if any one Is preparing to
smite him with an ak handle or other
deadly and effective weapon, he is not
car-step hog. He has the exagger-
ated ego.
When the bank cashier needs q few
millions, finding life irksome on a sal
airy of 5000 a year and decides to
buck the stock market with your saw
ings and those of your neighbOr, and,
coming out at the small end of the fl
nancial horn, decamps for Nfrica, he is
not bad man. He has the exaggerated
ego.
When a man operates a life insurance
company for the purpose of fitting his
family out with individual yachts and
palaces, rather than with a view to
making the dividend accumulations of
fact equal the dividend Accommodations
that glitter i'll the imagination Of the
agent he is not thief. He has the ex-
aggerated ego.
When a man persuades you that ne
has gold mine In Santo Domingo or
Alaska too large for personal use, and
is anxious to divide with a few friends
and casual acquaintance for whom he
has always cherished a kindly feeling.
and you Join with 1900 others in in
vesting your surplus cash, and it sub
sequently develops that the promoter
never contemplated digging in earth for
gold. but was satisfied to invcigle the
innocent into digging it from their
pockets, that man is not fellow to the
horse thief and second cousin to the
pickpocket. He has the exaggerated
ego.
1T is at once wicked and futile TO try
to proceed legally against persons who
do you financial or physical violence
while suffering from the exaggerated
ego The only practical plan of oper-
ating nowadays. when man must
needs paddle his own canoe or drift
down stream. is to apply the David
Harum golden rule, do unto others
as they would DO unto. and do it fust. -
being careful TO get together con-
siderable quantity of cash in the doing,
or prior thereto. Then march into
court with a large posse of picked
aIienists and explain that you have the
exaggerated ego.