davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-18
Pointers to FQ11dO171

wet i M The @ fact that & the % season is so the end HaTry Et Vaughn has always finished the
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-18
Well. can you beat this?


 Thirteen games to play at home.
 Twenty-three on the road.
 How Is that for a fatal combination of figures?
 With the seventh inning gone back on the home club and thirteen dallying with the fetlocks of James Claudius Fox and the same number trotting hand in hand with twenty-three, things look a uttle strange to tho superstitious.
 And where 's the bali :an or the ball player who is not just the least hit that way?-Atlanta Journal.
 Scribe Tenders had "Matty' Matthews arrested Thursday for the alleged assault bv the Pelican catcher the last time the Peicans were in Shreveport: 'Matty s likely to retaifate by suing Tenders for ilbel, as several stories have appeared Tn the Shreveport Times about 'Matty' which the backstop says can't be proved, Irnless the case Is compromised and hushed up. like all other Southern league scandals, we may yet get little fun out of it.-New Orleans Item,
 Bob BaGgh. president of the Birmlns- ham Ball club. offers the Baron trahehi 'e for sale at s50.Oo0. Officials of the local cluh estimate the value of the Now Or leans franchise ai 'Gce,01. Shows Whai faith they hold Tn ;he future or baso- hall in this city and .h= local promoters aren't far wrong. ether. ofieans Picayune. .,
 strange. On lhe same day one Ne" Orleans paper said ro hsnch'se m ihe league was wo~tl t2Ogsc.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-18

Chicago. August 11--C. Smiths pitching and Clymers batting defeated Chicago today. Clymer's two singles drove In two runs. R. H E. Chicago .. .. Q. Q. GOO GOO 000-0 1 Washington :. .. .. .. ..010 100 OOO--2 Il 0
 Batteries Patterson. White, Hart, Smith, Block. Empires, Evans and O 'Loughlin.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-18

St. Louis, August 17-Boston shut out St. Louis today, to 0, owing to fine pitching by Pruitt and good fielding be- hlnd him. RH.E. St. Louis :. .. .. .. 1000 GOO 0OO--O 0 Boston :. :. .. .. e. .010 GOO OOO-1 1
 Batteries: Howell, Stevens; Pruitt and Shaw. Empires, Hurst and Stafford.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-18

would be foolish indeed intimate have no a ooda hrd Qt n1rnu ncn+r
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-18

Without Manager Vaughn, will trip? Before sides from whic might
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13

Sometimes | think" remarked n
thoughtful woman. that We women
are ourselves responsible for many
Of the unchivalrous men we complain
Of.
"ln crowded car the other evening,
a woman, with sour vlsage, found no
seat, and every man In the car felt
her resentment. They evidently
hardened their souls against 1t. for
nobody offered the woman seat for
fully ten minutes. Then working.
man, with more conscience than his
fellow'passengers. Jumped to his feet.
With a whitening look she declined,
remarking that she could stand during
The rest of the journey as she had be.
come Med 10 II. The mans face red.
dened MS he sat down again, and the
faces Of all the other men showed
supreme satisfaction that they had
been spared the humiliation.
81 watched beautiful child In the
same car, n child who fearlessly made
friends with everybody within reach
and smiled upon others. She did not
meet with one rebuff. simply because
she gave the impression Of a supreme
confidence In the goodwill Of her
acishbors. There were suriy faces in
the lot, and II was lovely 10 see them
soften under the influence OF n charm.
Ing baby smile or little acts and
words Of friendliness. II that child
carries her fearlessncss and conf.
dcnce into womanhood she Will 6n,l
plenty Of mcn-and women-to make
her path easy and show her every
courtesy"
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13
A RAILROAD COLLISION.

ro;Iso,.i o.ir. 49,, -,
""o"d e0t'''oa "ioc"S ""fffe ant
' "' wv 'o"'' ''''''e'l''s WIN inc
' a '"s''" " '"e "'s'"lh on
,na ""'p."' '"'' I'll "opo''ioh 10
" '"' "ee't'ei"' some
'''''a' ''"' "aii'enea III
" "'''"" "o'' ""eh cohstilh'
''o, "'",.''eS'' ''Se'' me proper ope'
" VI '"' ""'''"" s!s'e" " mteF'
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13
.l.;;;IlIiIi'I|lIIII||(.II||||(.I|I

Z - ri 3
Tprrove unqueStionably and beyond anydot
hat 0tarrh OF the nose and throat can b. cure
an furnishing patients through druggists, am =
free Trial Boxes Of Dr.. shoops G,krrh Gu, \
lido this because I pn 80 certain. that DR.. shooI
0aArIh Cure will bring actual substantial hsl
Nothing certainly. Is 50 convincing ak phyNc !
tast Of any article Of real. genuine merit Bu, III
article must possess true merit, else The test wi
condemn, rather than advance 1t. Dr.. shoop.
0tArrh Cure Is q snow white, healing antiSepu
balm. put up In beautiful nickel capped glass Jan
q Soc. Such soothing agents Is OIL Eucalyptr1
Thymoi. aenthoi etc. are Incorporated into d
yslyety, cream like PetrolHtum. imported b. Df,
6hoop from Europe. II Casarrh Of tho noso and
throat has extended 10 the stomach. then BY y
means alious Internally. Dr.. Shops Restonuv
bloAtinr. belchins,S blliouaies,. bad sasts. .
sarsIJ call for Dr.. sho6p's Restorative.
For uncompllcated otarrh only Of tho hosea
hIost nothing else, however. nssd b uJsd
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13
Trials Of a Woman Suffraqist,

From the OnlOoker.
keir llarilie had trying experience
the other evening. Addressing meet.
ing mainly attended by the other side,
he failed to get a hearing until the
chairman said: Gentlemen. II you
will listen TO Mr.. ifardfc quietly he
will he happy to answer any question
yon may put TO him at the end Of his
speech
When the honorable member had
resumed his seat a question written
on half sheet of notepaper was sent
mp to Mr., IIardic. and passed by him
unopened to The chairman, who read
It, and grew very red In the face.
Read Il out" roared dozen men,
and the chairman at Inst obcyed. The
question was. why do they call you
Gibson Gir!?" Il finished the meet
Ing.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13

Tho Rev. G. W. Bent. pastor.-Public
worship at 10:45 a. m. and 1880 p. NJ
. The Rev. w. J. Eddy. Of the First Bap
fist Church, will preach at the morn
ing hour, and the Rev. ]. C. BroomGeld
pastor OF the NJ. p. Temple. ut The
evening hour. | shall be very glad to
have all our people hear these breth'
rem who have so kindly consented to
relieve the pastor for the day. Sun
day school at $3.50, In charge Of Supt,
+. A. Wilson; class at ll:45 and $50.
Junior League at l::S0, and Epworth
League devotions at $50. In charge Of
Mr.. Writ Brown. You are cordially
invited to attend these services.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13
Pure. .'WI'I'H|||I||S'K,E||::y.
OUTPUT LARGE
WHAT THE REVENUE BUREAU
RECORDS sHoW-kENTuckY:
STILL CHAMPION "A
PRODUCER.

WASHINGTON, April 1S.-one Of
the most interesting results of the pure
food MONUMENT against adul;irratel
whiskey, which cnllnInated In the rul.
Ing made by President Roosevelt and
shown her by the records Of the In.
terral Revenue Bureau, is the marvel.
Gus increase in the quantity Of genu.
Inc whiskey bottled In bond. Whisky
so bottled must be the purest straight
variety, which the rulings declare to
be the only kind entitled to the uuQual
flied name OF whiskcy. and must be
bottled under the supervision Of fed.
eral officers before It can go out to
thn public bearing the green guaran.
tee stamp OF the United States gov.
eminent over the cork OF the bottles
containing It. The amount so bottled
to date this year exceeds the total
iigures/of 1906. which were $500, 900
gallons in round numbers. From 1895
to 1908, inclusive, 100000 gallons was
always the maximum amount. In 1908
Il went 10 100000, in 1904 to 1000. 900
and In 1905 to 1,50O.OO0. This law Is
national and the Stntcs which are chief.
ly avallng of It are Kentucky, Mary.
land. Pennsylvania, Illinois, Ohio and
Indiana.
Rye whiSkey Is made In Is States Of
the Union. chiefly In Maryland and
PENNSYLVANIA. The former State last
year produced G,OO0.OOO gallons, while
Pennsylvania produced 100000 gal.
Ions. The total output of rye whis.
key for all the States was q 100000
gallons. Kentucky produced most Of
the Bourbon whiskey, and the total
output Of Bourbon whiskey for last
year was oi.OOO,00O gallons. Neutral
spirits. which the Attorney General
has designated as ethyl alcohol, and
which when mixed with whlskey pro
nounced compound" Is produced in
~ States. The great bulk of II comes
from Illinois. Ohio and Indiana.
The production OF this article has
been increasing annually. From H..
100000 gallons made in the United
States in 1878. the output has grown
10 Ct 100000 gallons In 1906.
There are 1000 "rectiiiers" scatter.
ed about "a States. They are chiefly
located In the States which have he.
come celebrated for genuine whiskey.
There Is annually "rcctitel" or com.
pounded In the State of Kentucky over
|'l0.O00.000 gallons, in Maryland over
100000 gallons, in Pennsylvania H..
COCOON gallons. Ohio. New York and
Illinois also 'rcctify" or compound in
large volume.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13
Satisfied With
z. aft s. Pr gram
ALI POLITICAL PARTIES IN CUBA
ARE PtEAsEo-ENettsH COLI.
HI z ohY,iN HAVANA, plsAP. ~
b g.55 POINTED. af

q" l. 10 4 -
HAVANA, April 1s.-Marvelous as
It may seem, all the political parties
Liberals, Conservatives and Repabli
cans, agree in expressing complete Sat
fsfaction with the policy outlined by
Secretary Of War Taft. Financial in
terests are much pleased with the out
look, and 1t is thought that the ex
pected period of depression which has
been threatened for two or three
months will not eyentuate. The banks
will make new loans, where before H
was their intention to keep their mon
ey locked up. The provisional govern
ment has telegraphed TO Washing ton
asking that Victor olmstead. chief Of
The Bureau OF Statistics OF the Depart.
ment Of Agriculture, come to Havana
Immediately to take charge Of the cen
sus, which Is to be taken prellminar,
IL an experimental election. The es
innate of the time necessary for com
pleting the census varies from -four
10 eight months.
The Lacha, Liberal organ, says
that the politicians must put aside
their personal ambitions and work TO,
the country. It adds that II the re
public Is not re.establshed It will moi
be the fault of the Americans, but Of
the Cubans themselves. The paper
comments sarcastically upon the sur
plus OF patriots who are looking oa'
solely for their own interests.
The Dissection, Conservative, urges
that Cuba must not be exposed to the
world rs n failure. Il says that Mr.
TafCs letter does not seek 10 concil
late any political party, but Is for the
general good of the island.
/ In the English colony dlsappoint
ment is s'iardedly expressed regarding
Secretary Taft's statement. The Eng
lishmen say the Secretary's statement
only guarantees good business for i,
little over year, and that BY the end
of IL months It will be necessary tc
retrench owing to the uncertaint,
about the new government. i is plain
" evident that English interests antici
pated a statement assuring II greater
degree OF permanent American control
Spanish commercial interests ar,
pleased because they consider Secre
tary Taft's statements concerning tran
guilty tantamomt to an assurance o
American control for several years.
1t has been determined that Cub;
will send delegates to The Hague con
ference. One of them will be Senol
Quesedae the Cuban. minis.er at Wash
ington. -''--s %
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13
New "cancer Cure" a Failure.

Boston Dispatch to the N. Y. Press.
Cancer IS incurabfe" is the final yer.
dict Of Boston's various medical
schools, after long investigation OF
statements that appeared In this coun'
Try and England last year that the
dreaded disease of cancer had finally
been successfully attacked.
The "trypsin' or pancreatic treat
ment was the agency by which the re,
suit WIS said TO have been obtained,
H. involved application Of the pancre.
attic Juice obtained from the human
rancreas for the eXtirpation Of the
cancer through incubation by hypo'
dermic needle.
This treatment has now been thor
oughiy tested by doctors attached to
the different medical schools and lis
pensaries Of Boston. and the results
are naught. No beneficial results have
been prevented. The tests haze ex..
tended over eight months. The ply
s:cian in charge of the cancer depart
ment In Harvard medical schools was
one of the most interested In the
claims for the new discovery. and he
applied It In what we're conceded to
he incurable cases.
"Ycs. We have tried the trypsin
treatment" said he. "and so far as
we have been able to discover Il has
had no results whatever"
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13
Mrs, Cyrus Boycrs is III at her home
on Merchant street.
Arbor Day Programme.

The following interesting pro
srammc was rendered by the pupils o
the different grades at the First wart
school auditorium Yesterday afher
noon:
Song--Flrst md second grades.
Northumberland Cordray.
Recltation--Earl Cunningham.
Song-Thlrd and fourth grades.
! Recliation--Clara Satteriield.
J" Neutrality-suspicious. Higgins. /.
Song-Fifth and siyth grades.
Recltation--NIary Gilhart
Recitatlon--Eva May.
!. Song-Scventh and eighth grades.
. Recitation--Loulse Leonard.
Observation-Disclosures Lloyd.
Song-School.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13
COMMENCEMENT
At l Submission
WILL" VII TAKE PLACE NEXT WEEK
WITH RENDITION OF GOOD
PROGRAMMES.

~ rs d a Z. . ~
cLARKsBURG, April 1s.-The grad.
uatlng class Of the shlnnston public
school has issued handsome com.
meRcemeaa invitations. TIL, cuut.
mencement exercises will be held in
the Baptist Church at Shinnston on
Thursday Of next week at s O'Clock
In the evening.
Tho baccalaurate sermon will BID
preached next Sunday morning in
the Methodist Episcopal church by
tho Rev. DR.. Elkanah Halley, Brln.
cipal of Broaddus Institute.
Monday night there will be class
social. Tuesday evening Rev. Wayne
x. Sta.naker, pastor OF the Metho.
dist Episcopal Church, will deliver n
lecture in the Christlon Church for
the benefit Of the graduating class.
Wednesday evening In the Odd
Fellows building Junior class pro.
sramme will be rendered, and the
same evening In the public school
building there will be q cbildren's pro.
gramme.
Thursday afternoon at 3 O'Clock
In the Baptist Church will be senior
class day, md Mt night in the same
church DR.. Waitman Barbe Will de.
liver the class address after the usual
commencement exercises. Friday
afternoon from l 10 s O'Clock there
will be school exhibit In the school
building.
The graduates are Mayme Anneta
flardcsty. Lena Marie IIaggcrty
Ada Marie Rohey, Opal Lcnore White.
man, Emma Laura Shlnn. Mary Naomi
johnson, Maybel Darlie Swiger. Bette
Gertrude Taught. Ella Pearle Sturm
Clarence Sturm, Nellie Swiger, Villa
Mabel Martin, Mildred Laura Jarrett,
Vera Radabaugh. Alice Glare Robin
son and Hattie Lorena Martin.
The class officers are Alice Robin,
son, president; Ada NJ. Robey. vice
president; Naomi Johnson. secretary:
Mildred Jarrett, treasurer, and Clar
ence Sturm, sergeant.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13
Dr.. SIl|loo|p's
Catarr|l GlIl'(
e. A. BILLIH6SLEA 4 co.
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
From the Chicago News.

From the Chicago News.
No, Cordelia. a grave epistle doesn't
necessarily find It way 10 the dead.
letter office.
How a man does hate to give up his
seat In a crowded car TO q short.hair.
ed woman!
Many dairyman's Idea OF pure milk
is the kind from which all cream has
been removed.
II a man has nothing to do and no.
where to so he can afford to sit down
and argue with woman.
Don't sit around and wait for oppor.
tunity TO knock at your door. Go and
knock on the door Of opportunity.
Our pity invariably Stops over when
we meet an easy.going man who Is
married to an intellectual woman.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13
To Revive Duelins in Oklahoma.


From the Kansas City Sihr
The Oklahoma constitution does not
forbid dueling. At a tine so far re-
moved from the days oithe code, the
omission of any refereIsc to duclIng
SHOULD hardly cause surprise. |, Is
somewhat surprising, however, TO know
that one Of the most conspicuous lead,
ers In the Democratic majority was
prepared to oppose on the floor Of the
convention any ban OIL ducling had
|! been proposed. This delegate, horn
In a Southern State, where ducling was
once the mode of settling disputes be,
tween gentlemen, Is sill in favor Of
this abandoned practice.
He said: "Men would not dare ma
lign each other In the press and In
the streets as they do now II they
knew that they would be compelled IL
stand up and he shot ut. unsustained
by the false courage of passion. and
under rules that would give
the physically weaker man an cal,al
opportunity with his stronger alvcr
sary."
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13

Sunday school. $3.50. ]. 5. Walker,
superintendent: sermon. 1917. sub
ject, Spiritual Association" Junior
Endeavor. 1850, leader, Miss Alice
Thomas. Y. P. S. C. E, $3.50, led by
Miss Madge Helmick; sermon, 1880.
subject, THE Better Way" prayer
meeting, Wednesday evening ut 7:2o.
The public is cordially invited to all
these services.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13
Train Bowls Rock Half a Mile.
Winsted Comm Dispatch to Ne
York Herald,

Winsted Comm Dispatch to New
York Herald.
The Capitol Express, on the Central
New England Railway, carrying State
Legislators. yesterday struck n bowl
der west of Canaan. The train was
stopped, hut as the howlder was not
In sight, Edward Smith, the engine
driver. supposed 1t had gone down the
embankment and resumed the journey.
After running half mile the train
was again stopped because Of unusual
vibration felt in the. cab, AMI Investi.
CATION showed ihpt the rock had gone
under the pilot anil had heen tumbled
over and over in front of the locomo.
tive. The pilot and lies were badly
splntcrcd. That the train was not de.
railel and thrown down the embank.
ment was considered Amazing.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13

DON'T WAIT TOO LONG.

!. At the first sign Of Backache !.
!. or pain In the region of the Kid. !.
i. neys. or weakness and Urinary !.
!. trouble. the following simple I.
X prescription should be used; !.
+ Fluid Extract Danlelion, one. ].
I. half ounce; Compound Kargon, !.
4. one ounce; Compound Syrup j.
!. Sarsaparilla, three olnccs. Take \
Ia teaspoonful after each meal J.
:. and at bedtime. ].
X Any g0aa prescription Rharma. i.
+ cy. will supply these three in. !.
+ gradients at small cost, which Z
!. can easily be mixed by shaking J.
4. well In a bottle. This Is said 10 !.
i. force the Kidneys to filter the J.
i. sour acids and pulsons from The !.
!. blood, overcoming the worst !.
!. cases Of Rheumatism. !.
+ + + !. !. i. !. 4 !. !. I. !. !.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13
BRAlNSToRMS AHEAD.

From the Detroit Free Press.
am going to have bratnstorm,
can feel II coming on;
And n mental Illumination,
When the umpire yells, "Strikt
onc!"
Oh, the time is drawing nearer,
When explosions mental may
Occur at any minute;
I'll be there on opening day.
can see ten thousand cgos,
Exaggerated there.
can see ten thousand brainstorms
Raising Sheol In the air.
And ten thousand Nominations,
In their Illuminating way
Will he busy, oh, so busy
On the coming opening day.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13

"ANTl.coRPu" removes fat ut the
rate OF 3 10 pounds week. No stnr-
walton diet. no exercise necessary. Pleas.
ant 10 take and absolutely harmless,
"ANTl-coRPU" Is not stomach
wrccking drug or patent medicines. II
Is made absolutely out or vegetable mat
ter only md Is perfectly harmless. 1t is
made In the shape OF tr!turate and Is
pleasant and easy to take. 1t Is en-
dorscd by, Physicians anu Scientists al
over the United States as the ONLY sure
cure and safe Anti-Fat Remedy.
"ANTt.CoRPu" reduces double chin
fat hips and ilabby cheeks. Makes dull
Complexion clear and healthy. and the
skin closc-iittlng and free from wrinkles
Fat people reduced by ANTl.coRPu
do not become stout again
SOLD UNDER A GUARANTEE.
| "ANTl.CORPu" IL guaranteed TO b.
absolutely harmless md to reduce fai
from TO pounds week or MONEY
BACK. We nre n Corporation md per.
fectly responsible.
| Price .l.OO per bottle Ask your Drug.
glst for II. but take nothing else lust rs
prepafdt on receipt OF price.
We will send sample bot.
E tic on receipt OF 10 cents
Free to pay for postage and
packing. II you will men.
ton that you saw the Ad In this Paper
This sample alone may DO sufficient &c
reduce you TO the weight desired.
Sold and endorsed by Cranes Drug
Store.
EsTHETlc CHEMICAL CO.
Dept. 1870, SIT Sixth Ave-, New York
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13

For Catarrh, let me send you free
inst to prove merit, trial size box
OF Dr. Shops Catarrh Remedy. II
Is n snow white creamy, healing anti
septic balm that gives instant relief
to Catarrh Of the nose and throat
Make the free test and see. Address
Dr. Shoop, Racine, Wis. Large lars
80 cents. Sold by E. a Billingslca &
Co.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13

$3.50 Bible school, W. a. Hustcad
in charge; 1915 sermon, "a New
Thing in the Earth" 100. B. y. p.
IT,, 500 sermon, "A New Doctrine"
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13
fAiRMoNT. MoRoANToWN a PiTTo.
BURG BRANCH. n - 75;.fi

Fry coNNELLsyILLB md PrTTsBuaa
Leave, No. l. $500 A. NJ; No. :, tH:ls
A. NJ; No. 81, s2:lb A. N: Arrive, Ns,
.. el:l0 p. NJ. No. .; 1880 p. II; Ne
4. 1910 P. H.; No. %, 1s:to. iLlf,!3ii
Fer MoRGANT0WN. Leave. Ne, a
se:@ T. n. Arrive. No. q. it:Jt A. Nj
No. q, x7:52 4. II. NJ F53a = =.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13

"Prcventics" will promptly check a
cold or the grippe when taken early
or at the "sneeze stage" preventIcs
cure seated colds as well. Preventics
are little candy cold cure tablets, and
Or. Shoop. Racine. Wis, will gladly
mail sou samples ard n book on Colds
free. II YOU will write him. The sam
pies prove their merit. Check early
colds with preventics and stop pneu.
monia. Sold in SC and CSC boxes by
Z. a, Dillinsslea & Co.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-13
IN The BEST 4 I. HuMoR 4.

"a h ~ n fs si,il H.
h 3Teaciier-=A mole eats daily twice
as muei as Il weighs.
Pupil-But how does II know how
much 1t welghs?- Harpers' Weekly
is Willie still paying attention to
Tlllie?" .5
NO. Z. 3 IN
did he jilt her?" ...l.. 4
mo; he married her."-Illustratel
Bits. s=lt5ia
THE trouble with that man Is tina.
he takes small matters seriously" Al
Eyes" answered Miss Cayenne, but
you could not expect him TO 90 other.
wise without sacrificing bis self.es.
teem."--Washington Star.
A man in Pittsburg once. hear,
Who owned a motor.bubbie,
Had fifteen million plunks year
And never got In trouble.
Chicago News.
willie, will you tell your sister |
am here?"
Would you like to have her come
down."
"Of course"
Then II you'll give mo n quarter
I'll tell her you are not here
Houston Post.
81 suppose" said the bachelor. who
had been asked TO address the Moth.
ers' Club. to
"Ah!" exclaimed II unmarried Ia.
dies, as they leaned forward eagerly.
Ito discuss the matter calmly and
dispassionatcly."
"oh!" they said. settling hack
again Ito their seats.-Chicago Rec.
ord.Herald.
Customel-Give me something on
the fanciful order-somethlng purely
imaginative.
Observation-Disclosures work that just
fills the bill-"The Quiet Life"
Custumer-The title doesn't sound
very promising. :
Bookseller-You don't understand:
the author Is married man.-l.ondon
Punch.
Clicnt.-fou have an item in your
bill: advice. January S. six.and.cight.
pence. That was day before re.
tanned You.
lawyer know II. But don't yon
remember Oh the Sth told You wOn'd
better let ME take the case for you?
Client-fes.
Lawyer-Well. my dear sir, that Is
lndyice-Tit.Bits