Bisbee daily review., 1907-01-02


 dor aud after moment found the right one and replaced it and returned 10 my work without word. He look ed after me. and l heard him mum bling under his breath. He got the other screen in after good deal of banging. and then be started to it those in the back parlOr I knew that the screens be had down would never ii. but 1t wasn't my business to butt in. He moved tiie chails around and banged at the sashes. and all of sud den the house shook. ran upstairs to find him on the floor with one Of his feet through the wire screen. He was that dazed that he let me belp him up. but no sooner was he on his feet than be shnrtel out:
 By the seventeen pipes. bus I'u have gore for this Woman
 q am not Mrs. BowSer. sir" said as he tried to kick the screen or his leg.
 But you helped her to put Up this job to assassinate nc"
 No one has tried to assassinate you. You must have stumbled and gone down. Can't yon tell that those screens are for the back bedrooms up stairs3"
 He sat down, breathing hard and gIowering at me. and ran up and got the right screens and fitted them in q jiffy. He felt ashamed of his display of temper and started in to tell me that he didn't believe was m the conspir acy to saw hls leg or. but I did not stop to listen to the whole of 1t. A few minutes later I heard him going up stairs, putting each foot down as if stamping of snow, and then all was quiet for ten minutes. then felt it a duty I owed to Mrs. Bowser to go up and rescue him. He had torn down curtains and pole from one of the front windows and moved both bed and bureau in his efforts to 1t the Kitchen door to window not half it's size. He was looking around for some living thing to pour out the vials of his wrath on when he caught sight of me and burst out with:
 ''f was just about to call you. Do you deny that you have gone and tacked an extra piece on to this screen in order to spite meY'
 Needed New Pair sf Eyes.
 Haven't you got eyes in your headT' I asked 'If had brother ten years old who couidn't tell the difference be tween screen door and n window screen I'd get pair of glass eyes for him.
 Are you claiming that that Is screen dcorr' be wbooped.
 ''OS course it is. Isn't 1t two feet too long for the window? Isn't there pan els to it7 Isn't there handle on lt? I'm only a poor girl. sir. with red headed mother and fellow with glass eye for beau. but can tell an elephant from q mouse"
 ''f'f be hanged if you ain't right" he said. with a smile. after taking iong look at the door 'I suppose must have been thinking about trad ing the house and lot for a chicken farm You needn't mention the incl dent to Mrs. Bowser Thanks for com Ing up. l am sure I can manage the others
 As went downstairs left him away and feeling better. He got the screens into the windows after half an hours work. strung out by his trying to make them fit bottom side up. and then he came down to the kitchen with the screen door. He had all his pomposity and con ceit, and he didn't mind upsetting the as he dragged the screen through. watched him as he stood the door up. It was top side down. He stood back and surveyed it and shook his head and muttered:
 'Jf Mrs. Bowser has been fooling with this door she'll hear from me in a way tc make her tired"
 You've got it wrong side up. sir" ventured to say.
 ''Ah. yes. S'moTe of my absentmind edness. I was thinking about those chickens again. If Mrs. Bowser tries to pump you switch her of. The door is right side up now and fits like a glove"
 He soon had the hinges screwed fast and the door swinging back and forth, but I was holding out for what came next. Most any sort of a baldheaded man can rehang a screen door, because there are all the marks of last year, but when you come to put on the spring to keep it closed-that's differ ent Mr. Bowser went ahead with the greatest confidence in himself. whis- ting as he worked, but when the spring was on and he stood aside the door flew open.
 He Was PuzzIed.
 "More of Mrs. Bowser," I heard him growl as he tried to make the door stay shut, but I didn't tell him wherein he had made a mistake. Instead of taking the spring of and turning 1t end for end. what does he do but take tbe whole screen of and turn the out
 1e in It wouldn't it that way, and
 ,id him that 1t wouldn't, and then
 ct go of his temper and shouted at
 T told you right at the start that it
 as a conspiracy When Mrs. Bowser cones home"-
 T can put that door on in five min utes."
 You can't in 5000 years.7
 With that he picked it up and sent 1t flying over the fence into a neIghbor's yard. but In stepping back his foot struck something and he went over backward and hit bis head against one Of the clothesllne posts. I ran out to