davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24
- The ~
Scrap Book
And She Kept on Smoking.

Aunt Chloe, do you think you are a
Christian?" asked a preacher Of an old
negro woman who was smoking a pipe.
Yes, brudder, l spects l is"
do you believe in the BibleT'
Eyes. brudder."
do you know there Is q passage in
the Scripture that declares that moth
ing unclean shall inherit the kingdom
Of heaven?"
Eyes, Is heard of It."
"Well, you smoke, and there is moth
ing so unclean as the breath Of a smOk-
er. SO what do you say to that?"
"Well. when I go dere I spects to
leave my breI behind me-"
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24
His Last Card.

A certain venerable a%rchdeacon en-
gagged as a new footman a we'll recon-
Mended youth who had served as a
stable boy. The first duty which he
was called upon to perform was to ac-
company the archdeacon on a series Of
formal calls.
Bring the cards, Thomas, and leave
one at each house, ordered his
ter. After two hours Of visiting from
house to house the archdeacon's list
was exhausted.
This is the last house, Thomas" he
snil. leave two cards here"
"Regcin' your pardon. sir" was the
reply. 4 can't. I've only the ace OF
spades left"
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24
She Couldn't Very Well.

An attache Of one Of the foreign Legal
tons in Washington had become very
much attached to one of the sweetest
and most beautiful girls in the capital
society. He felt quite sure that his
ardor was not altogether without re-
Spouse on the girls part. Their meet
ingS had become oftener and their ap-
]pearanres n public together Were fire.
Quenr. and the young fellow felt that
a certain ball tn be given on Il particu-
lar evening 10 which they We're both
invited would . a great deal -
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24
General Sherman Reeoanixed Him.

General sherman Recognized him.
Upon a certain occasion General
Sherman was the guest Of honor at a
banquet, after which a reception was
held, says the Boston Herald.
Among the people who fled in to
shake hands with him General Sher-
man noticed a face that was very ia
miliar, but which he could not place.
"Who are your" he asked In ar apollo
getic aside, as he welcomed the guest
heartily.
The man blushed and murmured be-
hind a deprecatory hand, made your
shirts, sir"
"Ah. Of course exclaimed the gener-
al loudly. and, turning to the receiving
committee behind him. he said:
Gentleman, allow me to present Ma
jor Schurtz."
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24
Notice Of Final Proof.

UNITED STATES LAND OFFICE
GREAT FALLS, Mont, June 20, 1907.
Notice IL hereby given that
JOHN JACOBY,
of Fort Benton Montana, has filed notice of his
intention to make hnsl ~tve-year proof In support
OF his claim. viz: Homestead entry No. l2,31o,
made June -, 1901, for the E section 32.town-
ship % north, range 8 east, as amended, and
that said proof win be made before Chas;- H.
Boyle. Z. :. commissioner, at his Office in Fort
Benton, Montana, on July 36, 1907.
He nance the following witnesses to prove
his continuous residence upon and cultivation OF
said land, VIZ: Charles Thompson, william,
Fink, Casaius A johnson, of Fort Benton, MOP
tsna, Walter johnson, Of Highwood, Montana
j. NJ. BURLINGAME, Register.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24
Necessity, Not Choice.

A woman hurried up to a policeman
at the corner Of Twenty-third street In
New York city.
Does this crosstown a take you
down to the bridge toward BROOKLYN"
she demanded.
"Why, madam" returned the police
man, do you want to 60 to Brooklyn?'
"No, I don't want to-" the woman
replied, "but I have to."-Ladies' Home
Journal.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24
Dividing Up.

Dividing Up.
Two casual acquaintances were dis
cussing politics. One announced that
he had turned Socialist.
II don't know what a Socialist Is"
said the other.
"a Socialist Is one who believes In
dividing up with the other fellow"
"Does that NEAR that II you had two
farms you would give me one?"
"Sure l would"
"And If you had two houses?"
Il would give you one."
"And If you had two shirts what
would you do with them?
".Ah. gwan! you know I hare two
hirts."-Everybody's.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24
Tho Best Crop.

1.-THE best crop is the crop Of Children
President Roosevelt's statement in his re-
cent speech at Lansing. Mich.l
Eyes Ablaze and Wagging Tongue
And Tippytoe are children three:
Romping here the whole day long.
Clambering upon my knee.
Hands and knees pom the floor.
Laughing. shouting. noisy crews
There Is Joy and something more
In the things that children 10.
Eyes Ablaz Is eight years old,
And a roguish. brown haired miss:
Loving arms that round me fold.
Lips God fashioned with a kiss.
Eight years old she Is and fair.
With many OF her mothers ways:
Daughter. Playmate. comforter.
That's my little Eyes Ablaze.
Wagging Tongue. a boy Of six,
Chattering the whole day through;
Up to many boyish tricks,
He's the ~noisiest Of the crew,
shrieks OF laughter seem to ring
Through the house the whole day
long.
Oh. the joys that children bring.
Eyes Ablaze and Wagging Tongue.
Then God sent US Ttppytoe,
Just to make our home complete:
There must be a babe, you know,
Toddling on uncertain feet.
Wide eyed. wondrous boy Of two.
Too soon older you must grow:
But God warmed our hearts anew
When he gave US Tippytoe.
OF the blessings God bestows
On his grown w children here,
Fairer even than the rose
Are our little ones 50 dear.
OF the gifts he sends today
To enrich .arth's kindly breast
Rings the truth when parents say
Little children are the best.
Detroit Free Press.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24
RUSH TESTS
Why American Cultivation Of Jap
anese Plant Breeds Troubles.
DO NOT WANT US TO GROW 1T

Nipponitss Object to Importation Of
Their Rushes to United States.
Would Rather Send Mats, but Astuts
Government Expert Gets the Goods.
1t Is not alone difference Of races In
California and along the Pacific coast
that Is at the bottom of the threatened
trouble with Japan, writes a Washing
ton correspondent Of tie New York
Globe. Such an ordinary harmless
thing as the mating used on the floors
Of American houses Is tending to in
crease the GOODNESS between the two
nations.
At present the great bulk Of the mat
ting used in the United States Is i'm
ported from Japan. About 100000
worth is brought in annually. and the
amount Is becoming larger. For years
the United States has gone ahead tend
ing to farming. mining. ranching and
politics and never stopping to think
there was no need for It to send mil
lions abroad to buy mating. Recently
a few New England manufacturers
and inventors have awakened to the
fact that the United States ought to be
making It's own mating. and the serv-
| ices Of the bureau of plant industry Of
the department Of agriculture have
| been enlisted.
The result Is that the rushes grown
In Japan from which japanese mating
is made have been brought over to the
United States. Agricultural explorers
have been sent out, and n In particu-
lar has devoted much time to import
ing into the United States the plants
Of that particular rush that grows lux
uriantly In Japan and from which the
mattings that are imported into the
United States are made. Much diff
Guilty was experienced In getting the
plants. The representative Of the de-
partment of agriculture had trouble in
the first place In getting hold Of the
plants and after he got them had trou'
BILE getting them out Of the country
Warnings were issued through native
newspapers and otherwise against per
hitting the Americans to get hold OF
the rushes, and it was only after hard
work that he accomplished his mission
The plants have been carefully looked
after and cultivated and have beer
grown successfully in considerable
numbers. They are being distributed
to various parts Of the United States
and given out to parties who will make
a careful effort to raise the mating
rush from them. Department Of Agri
culture officials believe the experiment!
will be successful.
Up in Maine a loom for making mat
ting has been invented. 1t will do TIN
work Of fifteen or twenty men. Thu
department Of agriculture has informa
ton that leads 1t to believe farmer
will be we'll repaid for growing mat
ting rush and that the industry will
soon develop into one Of Importance.
Every effort Is being made to develop
PUSHES suitable far mating. They ar
being obtained rot alone from Japan
but from China and other countries
and the PUSHES that grow in the Unite'
States naturally are being tested an
developed when varieties are fOun'
that can be wove into good mating
The main reliance is placed, however
on development of the Japanese ma
tjp,r u,,S1,
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24
Notice Of Final Proof.
UNITED STATES LAND OFFICE,

UNITED SrAr8s LAND OFFICE,
GREAT FALLS, Mont, July II, l0Jt.
Notice is hereby given that
ADOLF STIPMAN,
OF Chester. Montana, has died notice Of his in.
tention to make dnal hve-yesr proof In support
Of his claim, viz: Homestesd entry No. 1885,
made March ?. 1901, for the SEX sen section u,
and lots I, ?, 8 and s.. section =, township -
made before Maurice Spangler, q: 8. commits.
sioner, st his once in Chester, Montana, on
Tuesday, August %, 1907.
He names the following witnesses to prove his
continuous residence upon and cultivation of
laid land, viz: John .Arthues, james 8. Cox.
Thomas P. shutter, Of Chester, Montana, and
Martin Wasesha, of Beatrice, Montana.
j. NJ. BURLIN0AME, Register.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24
Desert land..Finai Proof.
UNITED STATES LAND OFFICE,
GREAT FALLS. Mont, July 10. 100

GREAT FALLS. Mont, July ~, l0..
Notice 10 hereby given that
W1LHELMIENE LOHSE,
ct Judith, Chouteau county, Montana, has died
notice of intention to make proof on her desert
land claim No. 5.soo, for $40 scres Of unsurveyed
land, beginning ct . point about one-Qusrter
mile northeast from the Judith ferry, across the
Missouri river. near the mouth Of Judith river,
north eide Of the Missouri river, thence east 1870
feet, thence north 1880 feet, thence east 1890 feet,
thence north $50 feet, thence east 1870 feet,
thence north 1920 feet, thence west 264O feet,
thence south 1871 feet, thence west 1890 feet,
thence south 1920 feet, thence west 1890 feet,
thence south 1920 feet, thence east 1890 feet,
thence south 1870 feet to the place Of beginning,
containing 80 acres in Chouteau county. Mon.
NWh sen, MEN, sen Nwk section ., SWh
sWk section Is, SEA SEh section IA, township
y north, range IL east, Montana meridian, UNI.
surveyed, before Chss. n. Boyle, U. 3. commits
ses:s At n HE e satS d in r n9 a Benton ,a Montana or
She names the following Witnesses to prove the
complete irrigation and reclamation of eaid land
John Lohss, Julius Lehfeldt and Hans Lehfeldt,
Of Judith, Montana; James Conley, Of Conley,
Montana.
J. M. BURLIN0AMR. Register.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24
Yes or No.

yes or no.
1t vas at an election meeting. and an
excited voter shouted to the candidate,
Don't beat about the bush; answer
my question Yes or NO." The can
didate replied, "But, my dear sir, there
are some questions which cannot be
answered Yes or No" The elector
replied rudely with the single excla-
nation "Bosh!" The candidate con
tinued: Every we'll. l will prove what
l say. Now. sir. the question l will
put You is this: Have you left off beat
ing your wife," And the meeting
shouted to the inquisitive e%lector. "An-
swer him Yes or Nor" London
News.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24

him, So hc personally selected q box
of the most beautiful flowers he could
get. and writing Il note addressed to
the girl. gave it to his valet, carefully
~instructing him tn deliver it with the
box in about two or three hours.
The nan finally reported that the
box and note had beer delivered, but
to the attaches surprise when he ar
rived ut the ball and went straight up
to the girl. he noticed that she was not
alone and was carrying some other
flowers. She barely nodded to him as
he approached. and during the entire
evening distinctly stunned him. The
evening was a miserable one, and he
went home sick at heart. There he
found his box of flowers standing on
the table. Mystifled, he summoned his
valet, only to be assured that he had
personally delivered the note and box.
But not that one. SIR" he added.
"You pointed out quite another box.
SIR"
.What was in the box you 1p0k2"
asked the young a absolutely mystt-
fed.
II cannot tell. sir, and naturally I
did not open It," replied the valet.
He was sent In haste to the girls ad-
| dress, and the box was brought back
to the young man. who opened 1t only
/ to find that his valet had carried to the
girl a new lot Of underwear which he
had bought that day for himself and
had sent home.
And the note had read:
MAY I hope that you will wear these
for my sake ?"-Ladies' Home Journal
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24
In the Top Drawer.

His mother tucked f~our-year-old
Johnny away in the top berth Of the
sleeping car. Hearing him stirring in
the middle Of the night, she called soft
ly:
Johnny. do you know where you
are?"
'"Tourse I do" he returned sturdily.
I'm in the top drawer."-Youth's Com
panion.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24
Men and 6rutes.

Men and 6rutes.
Now, gentlemen" said Sheridan as
the ladies' left the room, are We to
drink like men or b~easts?" The guests
exclaimed, Like men, Of course"
'Then," said he. 1--WE are going to get
jolly drunk, for brutes never drink
more than they want"
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24
Limiting the Trouble.

Il suppose you will marry when you
grow up said the visitor pleasantly.
NO." replied the thoughtful little
girl: mamma says papa Is more care
than the children, 50 l guess the ri
of ny children will he enough for me
without the rare Of q husband"
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24
A Valuable Office Boy.

The employer was bending " a ta-
bic, looking at the directory. The new
Office boy slipped up quietly and poked
a note into his hand. The surprised
employer opened it and read:
"Honored Sir-Yer pants Is ripped"
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24
No Modern Home Is Complete
Without a Telephone.

The greatest labor and time-saviug
convenience Of the age. You can talk
from your telephone to every subscrib-
er in any exchange in Utah, Montana,
Idaho, Wyoming, as we'll as all Pacific
coast points and Colorado and New
Mexico. Short rates for short talks.
Halt minute up. The pay begins when
the talk begins.
Rates from 300 up, for unlimited
local service.
Leave your orders now. The new
instruments are the very latest i'm
proved,
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24
GEORGE l.. OvERFIELD.

Cattle brand -
shown on cut; Also
1 on left hip only;
re and re on the
right ribs.
Inconsistencies
5 on left ribs OK
thigh from fAu
of 1894.
Ear. mark, y
lope in left and
split In right.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1907-07-24
Rocky Mountain Bell Tel. Co.

Water right blanks-onIy correct
form published-tor sale at the RIVER
PRESS Office.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-08-16
The Earliest Anchors.

The earliest anchors Of which we
have any record were Of wood, and
gradually, through the iron anchor OF
one hook and the anchor in the shape
Of rake, there was evolved the an
Choir with the straight thick shank,
the two curving arms with flattened
extremities and the long cross stock.
The process of storing one of these old
anchors was long and laborious one.
1t was hove close up to the capstaD
or windlass; a man was let down by
rope to hook on huge tackle, by
which the anchor was then hoisted.
still perpendicular, to a stout project
ing timber. Then the lower end had
to be hoisted up horizontally by an
other tackle and the whole made fast.
In the modern stockless anchor a
chain Is attached to it at the balancing
point, and this is passed through a
pulley at the head of the anchor davit
When the anchor is high enough, davit
and all swing round until the anchor
is over the billboard, where it rests
and is secured by chains.-London
Globe
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-08-16
The Oyster and the Cookie.

If the average person were asked
what was the strongest living thing it
is probable that he would name the
lion or some such huge denizen OF the
forest and would not even think Of the
unassert.ve bivalve. But so great is
the power possessed by the oyster that
to open it force equal to 1,319.5 times
the weight of it's shell-less body is re-
CURED The shell-less limpet pulls
1884 times it's own weight when in the
air and about double when measured
in the water. The Mediterranean coc-
kle Venus vurrucosa) can exert pull
ing power equal to 2,071 times the
weight Of its own body. If the human
being possessed strength as great in
proportion as that the average man
would be able to lift the enormous
weight of 100000 pounds, pulling in
the same degree as the limpet. And il
the man pulled in the same proportion
ate degree as the cookie he would sus-
tain a weight of no less than 3,106,500
pounds
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-08-16
ST. GEORGE and the DRAGON.

Other nations besides England have
fought under the banner Of st. George,
and other knightly orders as well as
that Of the Garter have been instituted
in his honor. He was the guardian saint
of Sicily, Aragon, Valencia, Genoa, NAL
to and Barcelona; Venetian order Of
st. George was created in 1900, a
Spanish in 1917, an Austrian In 147O, a
Genoese in 1472 and Roman in 1892.
More modern orders bearing his name
are those of Bavaria Q729), Russia
176O and Hanover 1880. The device
Of st. George Staying the dragon forms
part of the arms Of the car and ap-
pears on several Russian coins. The
conjecture that this was owing to the
presentation Of the Garter by Eliza
beth to Ivan Vassilievitch has no foun'
dation in fact, for Chancellor, the first
outspoken Englishman to visit Russia,
speaks Of dispatch sent in 1904 from
Ivan. Vassilievitch to Queen Mary, the
seal of which twas much like the
broad seal Of England, having on the
one side the image Of man on horse
back In complete harness fighting WIN
a dragon -London Chronicle.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-08-16
Queer Positions of Hearts.

There is one curious fact which not
everybody notices about the common,
finger-long, green caterpillars of our
larger moths Their hearts, instead or
being in front, are at the back of the
body and extend along the entire
length of the animal. One can see the
heart distinctly through the thin skin
and can watch it's slow beat, which
starts at the tail and moves forward to
the head. Hearts of this sort reaching
from head to tail are not at all uncom-
mon in the simpler creatures. The
earthworm has one, and so have most
worms, caterpillars and other crawling
things Hearts in the middle OF the
back also are quite as frequent as
those in what seems to us to be tAC
natural place. Many animals, the lob
ster for example, and the crayfish and
the crab, which have short hearts like
those of the beasts and birds, never
theless have them placed just under
the shell in what, in ourselves, would
be the small Of the back.-St. Nicholas.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-08-16
Men Past Sixty in Danger

More than half Of mankind over sixty
years of age suffer from kidney and blad-
der disorders, usually enlargement Of
prostate glands. This is both painful
and dangerous, and Foley's Kidney Cure
should be taken at the first sign of dan
ger as it corrects irregularities and has
cured many old men Of this disease. Mr..
Rodney Burnett, Rockport, Mo-, writes:
Il suffered with enlarged prostate gland
and kidney trouble for years and after
taking two bottles of Foley's Kidney
Cure I feel better than I have for twen-
ty years, although I am now 81 years
old."-H. j. Stangl
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-08-16
SIand Of Other DAYS.

Slang has always been a fruitful
source for the expansion of language,
and instances may be multiplied Of
words now respectable which were
once tabooed as vulgarisms. But, on
the other hand. there have been many
slang phrases in use for centuries
which have never become acceptable
to the purists. AS long ago as 1850 the
celebrated letter writer Horace Wal
pole used to speak of Sitting guzzling'
and getting drunk as an OWL" Then
again in the diary of one Of the most
prominent woman writer's Of the eight
zenith century, Frances Burney, are
found good slang phrases Of the Amer
lean college girl Of today, as, for in
stance, II sneaked out" did you
ever know such a toad?" and II had
a vile cold."-St. Louis Republic.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-08-16
The "Rook of Sports"

The Book of Sports was procla-
nation by James l., who in this publ
cation in 1913 signiied to his people
the royal pleasure with regard to what
sports, games and amusements might
be practiced on Sunday. The king init
mated that mo lawful recreation should
be barred on that day to his good peo-
pie" The sports forbidden on Sundays
were bear and bull fighting, bowling
and interludes. Those who did not at
tend church were not allowed to join
i'll the sports, and no one could go out
of his parish. The amusements allowed
were dancing, archery, leaping, vault
ing, May games, Whitsun ales and the
setting up of May poles.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-08-16
Knew Denmark, but Not Hamlet.

FNfSW w. wv
The Literary Lady-Do you think
hamlet was insane or merely assum-
ing to be?
The V1ctim-I beg your pardon. I
didn't catch the name.
The Lady-Hamlet
The Victim - Oh, yes. Odd name,
isn't it? Friend of yours?
The Lady-Tm talking Of Hamlet,
Prince of Denmark.
The Victim-TO be sure. Hamlet,
Prince of Denmark. [ know lot of
those Denmark princes, but | don
seem to place Ham. By tie WAY, Den
marks getting to be quite a town.
They tell me they have two regular
trains running there now, one Of them
a freight. And I heard just the other
day that eastern capital had secured
an option on the building lot across
the street from the livery stable for a
clothespin factory Denmark is GER
tainly looking up.
The literary lady glares at the vic
tim coldly and removes herself to an
other part Of the room.
Whereat the victim smiles.-kansas
CITY Independent
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-08-16
A Bit Too Realistic.

Some amateurs in a provincial town
gave a theatrical performance. Just
before the curtain went up the star
actor took the manager aside and said
to him:
.Now, look here! l don't propose to
drink water instead of wine in the
drinking scene in the second act
want wine genuine wine. The uni
ties must be preserved. We want to
make this play as realistic as possl-
ble"
"Oh, you want champagne at ID shil-
.ings a bottle, do your
Eyes, sir Everything must be re-
alistic."
'sAll right. In the second act you
shall have real wine, and when you
take poison in the last act you shall
have some real poison. I'll see that
you don't complain of the play not be-
ing realistic enough. How does prus-
sic acid strike you?'-London Tit-Bits.