Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-27
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take his place for twice that amount.
X X
fond mother living in a northern Mich
igan town has written to Gov. Warner Of
that state to say that Providence had
blessed the family with trplets, and that
her neishbors all say she is entitled to
something from The government" The
letter was forwarded to Washington.
She writes to say that she thinks she is
deserving she has other children and
her husband is a harG-working man who
has lost several fingers in a sawmill
We have named the triplets,' writes
the woman, after the President, the gov
ernor and the King Of England. We call
them TEDDY, Freddy and Eddy.
The little fellows, all Logs. look 50 nearly
alike, says the motnel. that it has been
necessary to tie ribbons about their wrists
Teddy wears a red ri0lgon, Eddy white
ribbon and Freddy one of blue. 50 that
collectively the twins represent the colors
of the flag.
government on the triplets. the mother
says it is her intention to take them to see
The President and the governor.
!: e
The street peddler was shouting Water
melons, up al the second story window
when woman thrust out her head and
asked
How much?'
Fifty cents. maam.''
And warranted ripe?"
mo. l cant warrant EN-. l have to buy
EN- by the hundred, and they won't war
rant them TO me. Sold over a hundred
yesterday and not 4 kick. Ninet!-nine
chances out of a hundred that the melon
you buy is a luscious rcd-Core that Will
melt in your mouth. Have one?"
'Noap. Not without YOU warrant it"
That's the one thing lacking in human
nature" said the peddler, as ne turned
watermelon People will take your word
for potatoes in bag. for corn in the husk.
and for cucumber that you are going to
bring in tomorrow. They will send their
medicine-take q SaleSman's word about
clothing-walk into the traps of hundred
SWindlerS every day III the week. but when
it comes down to the watermelon you must
warrant it ripe or go sale. l am only
common man, sir. and don't prvtenn to
understand anything beyond this work but
If you want my opinion l Will say that L
believe until the American people come to
take the watermelon as 1t is, ripe or green.
we shall stand still in oul civilization. Yes.
sir. and get along, you old boss. or III cut
the hide off ye!'
Whether the cat has supreme confidence
In the goodness of humanity or merely
contemptuous dsdain for whatever man
may do has long been a debated question.
Perhaps the genus vas spoiled by the wo--
ship of the Egyptians. which guaranteed
them immunity. and individuals still think
that they are beyond reach of harm.
Be that as it may one little white kitten
showed plainly last Wednesday that she
had no fear OF what might happen to her.
As a matinee crowd was filling the side
walk In front OF one of the Washington
theaters. the kitten sat on the pavement
directly in front of the entrance to the
and proceeded with her toilet, daintily
licking the dust of her diminutfre paws,
while the hurrying playgoers picked their
way around her. giving amused siances
down at the tiny animal who paid no more
attention to them than II they had been lay
figures When the crowd had entered the
theater and the sidewalk was clear, pussy.
gathered herself together. yawned super
ciliously. and started off sedately to some
destination known only to herself
Some amusing replies are received by the
government officials who are engaged In
collecting data for the new official register.
fami,iarly known as the Blue Book. One
of the queries propounded to office holders
is: What are your marital relations?
The answer should be either married.
single or widowed"
An officer who is charged with the task OF
sending out these questions received two
notable replies recently. The first reply
was MY marital relations are very unsat-
fsfactory." Another toiler in one of the de-
partments of Uncle Sam filled out his blank
as follows:
Question. What are your marital rela-
tions?"
Answer They are hell"
This is the time OF year. said a we'll
known Washington society woman to some
friends after a trip to New York prepara-
tory to going to Bar Harbor for the sea-
son. when you meet your New York
friends on the street and they give you
their awful telephone numbers on the fly,
expecting you to remember them.
Everybody has left town., cries one. I
shall be here only a few days longer.
Come to see me. Do. l am lonely as can
be. You won't forget Will you: You re-
member my telephone number? 1231s93
Chelsea? Don't you forget it now, Will you:
And come to me! And come to see me!
Another stops her automobile at sight
of you coming along.
$50 glad to see YOU she excaims. 'Aw-
fully glad. Haven't seen you for ages.
We are going for an auto trip. Going next
week Come to see us before we CO. won't
you? Please do.
Then as the auto starts off:
Don't forget my telephone number will
YOU? l told 1t to you, you remember.
325l7s9275S Stuyvesant. Don't forget! Now
do come
Then as you walk slowly along you hear
footsteps behind you and stop and look
around Mrs. Doucet. the pretty woman.
running after you. She catches you by the
arm:
"'You dear thing she cries. When have
T seen YOU before? 1t has been years and
years and years. Oh yes. at the last meet
ing of the Pleiades Club l had forgotten.
Iut IT seernpd Look here, l am
eoI, = out of town for the summer. Going
in a week or two. Cant tell which. whether
one or two; any way. l AIN going. Then
| won't see you again till fall. Won't you
come to see me? You must. Have you my
automobile NUM- mean my telephone
number? OF course you have. 1O0Os9I654321
::2l River You won't forget ~. will you?
Please don't now. like a dear. and be sure
and come to see me before l go away. Re-
member It is for the summer.