davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1907-02-16
A GREAT SAVING.

Here is an amusing tale from
Germany about a man who thought
he was a very clever fnancier, and
yet does not seem to have had quite
as much sense as a boy who knows
enough to go in when it rains:
A barge was being towed up the
Neckar from Mannheim to Heidel-
berg, and a shoemaker on the tramp,
with a large knapsack on his back,
came up and asked the bargeman
how much he would charge him for
q ride on the boat. The bArgeman,
who was a bit Of a wag, replied (;
"Fifteen kreuzers; but if you help
pull, only six" The shoemaker
thought the matter over for a
minute or two, and, calculating that
he would save nine kreuzers by
helping to pull, threw his bag into
the boat and cheerfully tugged at
the rope all the way to Heidelberg,
when he forked out the six kreuzerE
and shouldered his lnapsack again.
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1907-02-16
BELIEF IN FAIRIES.

A young lady recently consulted
me, as a specialist, on the problem of
the existence of bad fairies, writes
Andrew Lang, in the Chicago Amer
lean. AS she had only seen four
summers, | replied that only good
fairies have a place in the scheme
of things which we call nature.
The existence of fairies is occa-
sionally called in question by the lit
tie girls Of a skeptical age. Little
boys appear to be unconcerned with
the subject; their thoughts are en-
tirely occupied by machinery,
motors, telephones and steam en-
gines, and if they chance to be timid
their imagination a create no noe
turnal terror more interesting than
the figure Of the common burglar.
To reassure them, | am accustomed
to say that there are no such things
as burglars, adding the acceptable
argument that | never saw a burglar,
and never knew any person who did
see one. This argument usually re-
assures the infant nationalist
though, speaking as a logician, l do
not think SO highly of it as some
philosophers.
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1907-02-16
COLD CANNOT HURT WATCHES.

when a mans watch goes wrong
in winter he is apt to think it is be-
cause the cold has affected it." said a
jeweler.
cit used to be so because the cold
contracted the metal of the delicate
balance wheel. But now this wheel
is made partly Of brass and partly Of
steel, like the compensation pendu-
lum in a clock. These metals have
opposite responsibilities and the re-
suit is that the balance wheel is al
ways Of the same size and runs with
the same speed in all kinds Of wealth
or and the cold does not affect it."
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1907-02-16
A cHlLD's ADVICE.

Little Howard, whose age is five
years, has an older brother who has
recently been admitted TO member
ship in the boy choir of a fashion,
able Episcopal church. One day
Howard heard his mother taking his
father to task because he had never
gone to hear his older son sing.
Howard had frequently been taken
to services by his mother OF his
grandmother, and he seemed to be
rather. proud of the fact that among
the surpliced boys who marched in
at the beginning Of the ceremonies
and out at the close was Palmer, his
'big brother"
One Sunday morning Towards
father, somewhat conscience strick-
en-, mayhap, said, after getting up
from the breakfast table: "Well, |
think I'll go to church to-day and
hear Palmer sing"
Howard looked up at him very
gravely and said; 81 would advise
you to go in the afternoon. They
don't let the preacher have 80 much
to do, and it's shorter them
Judge.
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1907-02-16
WHEN THE FISH BITE BEST.
It is In the Latter Part of May and
In June.

Fish bite best in the latter part Of
May and in June, according to a
writer in the Cutters Book. This is
due to their mode of protecting
their spawning beds. In midsum-
mer they retire to deeper water dur
ing which time fishing is very bad.
After the first few cool nights OF
late summer they may BE- found
again among the weeds or on the
shadows. incidentally. it may be
said that any law which permits Of
! fishing before July l is little pro-
lection to the bass in North lake.
There is little to be said in favor
of any particular part of the day.
1t was never found that the early
morning or later afternoon hours
were better than midday
Easterly winds are best. The
northeasterly for pickerel and south
easterlv for bass. While still wealth
er and southwesterly winds are least
favorable.
Times Of low barometer, and, we
may conclude, of unsettled weather.
are much better for fishing than
periods of high barometer, Cloudy
weather fayors pickerel, while cleal
weather is better for bass. Botf
kinds considered, there is no choice
From this it would follow that
| good day for fishing would be ont
with an east wind, low barometer
: clouds for pickerel and clear if yo,
want bass. Go out late in May or il
early June if you want fish and il
{ early September if you are a sports
= man, and then start fishing afte
5 YOU have had a good breakfast an.
' read the morning paper, if there
/ one to be had, and come in at a rea
: sonable time in the evening. Whett
er these conditions would repeated
give us good fishing is the question
The figures shown in my table
= could have been obtained only frol
{ the fact that good fishing did repea
9 eddy occur under just such cond
: lions and with the opening Of al
other season it would be we'll
A make notes on just this point.
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1907-02-16
NEW VIEW OF NERO.

During a recitation in history in a
Baltimore public school, the teacher
once put the question:
"Who was Nero?"
81 don't know exactly, ma'am,"
said the pupil addressed, a girl of
ten. 'But l think he's the one they
sings about in Sunday school"
"1n Sunday schoOlF' repeated the
teacher, unable to recall any re-
ligious music having Nero as its
theme. ''What do you mean?"
"Don't you know the hymn,
ma'amP" asked the girl, surprised.
It's Nero, Ny God, to Thee"
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1907-02-16
HE KNEW.

The pretty teacher was trying 80
explain the difference between good
conduct and bad, says the Youths
Companion. Good actions" she
explained, care the lovely flowers.
Bad ones are the weeds. Now can
any little boy or girl tell me the
difference between flowers and
weeds? What are flowers? What
are weeds?"
"Weeds," said Walter, who had
been struggling with the sOrrol in
his mothers garden, care the plants
that want to grow, and flowers an
the ones that don't"
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1907-02-16
WERE HAY ON GEOGRAPHY.
Australians Had Queer Ideas as to
How to Reach Africa.

It is a foregone conclusion to the
American sehoolboy that the man
who tries to walk anywhere from
Australia is doomed to a wet6ng;
but to some Australians, whom the
author of "In Search OF Eel Dorado"
met, the obvious was not so appar-
ent.
"Say, boss" said one of them,
suddenly, show far is it to the warp
"South Africa is about 1000
miles from here. Are you thinking
of going?"
"Well, some of the boys was talk
ing hat way, but none Of us knew
the country, or whether the track
was to sunrise or shutdown"
"Africa is west from here"
els there enough water for horses
on the trail?"
Man! You cross the ocean"
"Well, l reckon old Joyhorse
here, can cross anything; but i
beats me to know how a Teller cal
carry tucker for all that distance
1 suppose there is plenty Of station
on the road, thought"
The traveller who was supplyin.
the information sought for an eS
PLANTATION which would convey mean
ing, and found it not but a sudde
sandstorm turned their thought
from the subject.-Youth's Con
Danion.
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1907-02-16
4 T THAT WORKED.

Stockson-One day last week old
Gotrox bought a lot Of those ~Do-It-
Now" signs and hung 'em around
the Office.
Bond-How did the staff take it?
Stockson-Almost unanimously.
The cashier skipped with $4,000,
the head bookkeoper eloped with the
private secretary, three clerks asked
for an increase Of salary and the Of
Gee boy lit out to become a highway
man and got as far west as Pitts
burg before he was caught and dis
armed.-Judge.
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1907-02-16
MAKES A g.

"When l see a man and woman
enter my Office together l can tell at
once which one is to be the patient
by the way they act" said a dentist
a few days ago. "If the man is to
have a tooth pulled or filed, he slips
up and looks all around as if he had
the ague and says in a soft voice;
"I think one Of my teeth needs a
little Of your attention
off the woman is the one who has
been suffering, the man walks brave
ly up and says:
MY wife wants a tooth pulled"
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1907-02-16
HEN eoERs PLAYED MARBLES.
ElltleaI Prisoners Amused Them
selves Like s~choolboys.

How the grave old Boer leaders
ayed marbles like schoolboys is
bid in Carl Jeppe's new book on the
~ransvaal. The old gentlemen were
prison for political reasons at the
me. Mr.. Jeppe says: ''The re-
ormers c~ongregated all day long in
he large central square of the pris-
q which presented a most animated
Gene. In every direction you could
&c men receiving their relations,
riends or solicitors. Between these
Eager knots the Others walked, or
onnged on rugs and blankets, read
ng, writing OF killing time with
ards and chess. The fayorite game,
however, was that Of marbles.
ut was a strange sight to see mid
lle-aged men, whose daily occupa-
hon had been a game in which the
counters consisted of many thou
sands of pounds, eagerly %contending
for the possession of a few round
stones of the value Of a shilling Oh
50 to the dozen.
"And it was remarkable, too, as al
Illustration of the fallacy Of the pop
ular impression that the acquisition
Of wealth is all luck that it wa
the big capitalists who held all tn
marbles when the doors Of thei
prison opened"
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1907-02-16
STEAM REPLACED ALREADY.

81 suppose electricity will even
tually take the place Of steam," re-
marked the mechanical chap.
The man who lived in the apart
ment house shivered. Something
has already taken the place of steam
in my radiators" he remarked. ppm
afraid to ask the janitor what it is"
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1907-02-16
BEFORE THE BATTLE.

Mrs. Gasser-I was, outspoken in
my sentiment at the club this after
noon.
Mr. Gasser-I can't believe it'll
Who Outspoke you, my dear2-Puck.
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1907-02-16
TO BE 0

IAN actor should lose himself in
his part, shouldn't hep"
eyes" answered Mr.. Storming-
ton Barnes. "But it shouldn't be
carried too far. Many Of US loss
ourselves in our parts so completely
that the public can't sec us at az.
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1907-02-16

Customer-How much for that
suit Of clothes if | pay cash?
Tailor-Forty dollars.
Customer-How much on credit?
T~ailor-Eighty dollars, half Of Il
down.
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1907-02-16
"ALL RIGHT"

Farmer thought you said this dog
was all right for the rats. Why, he
won't look at them.
Dealer-Well, that's all right for the
rats, amt it?
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22
GENERAL NEWS

Mrs. Lovicia Cox, the Oldest
woman in New England, died
last week at Harrington, Maine,
aged 1903 years.
Joshua Voorhies, a negro, has
had his name placed on the bal
lot for mayor on the independent
ticket at Kansas City. His petit
ton to be placed on the ballot
was signed by 57S negroes.
Charged with murder, arrested,
afterwards released without bail,
Annie Powers, a white girl only
IA years old, has been indicted
by the grand jury at Florence,
Alabama. II Is alleged the girl
killed a negro boy, nins years
old, with q rock.
In Oklahoma the Democratic
party will hold primaries June |
for the nomination Of candidates
for the United States Senate and
for all state Offices. The new
state has given women the right
TO vote In oil school district oil.
eotions,
Five lawyers at Omaha, No.
braska, last week received O foo
OF 100000 for three days work,
They were employed to contest
tho will Of q wealthy citizen who
died recently, and tho relatives
kept the contest out Of court by q
compromise, by which the five
lawyers received a good per cent,
A few days since at Mt. Pleas
ant, Tennessee, during the
absence Of Peter Gates and wife
from home their s.year.old son
took q loaded gun from tho rack
and when another brother, aged
10, attempted to take the gun
away from him II was accidental.
ly discharged, killing their H.
months.old sistor instantly.
Judge Jones Of tho United
states court Of Montgomery,
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22

Alabama, has refused to fine or
sentence to Jail Mrs. Cynthia
Hawkins, who plead guilty to
illicit distilling. The woman said
the whiskey she made was used
by her sick husband, who died
recently, and the court told her
to 90 home TO her children.
The Board Of Health OF Dem
YER, Colorado, has issued an orr
der that all house tents wherein
are residing people suffering
from consumption must be re.
moved outside the limits OF tho
city. There are thousands OF
these house tents In the city, and
q large part Of them arc occupied
by consumptives from different
parts Of the country.
Andrew Thomas, q white man,
was hanged at Mobile, Alabama,
last Friday for the murder OF his
wife, Tho day before bis exc.
eution, Thomas was allowed TO
20 out In the jail yard and view
the scaffold from which he was 10
hang. Looking at 1t, he said:
"Sheriff, why not lot mo paint
this scaffold;. ] can do II we'll.
Lot me paint II rcd, white and
bluo." The sheriff refused his
request.
AT Shreveport, Louisiana, at
about midnight, In the court
room, where no had five minutes
before boen declared not guilty
OF murder, Lee Brock was married
to Mrs, Hattie Kelley, the woman
In defense Of whose reputation he
did tho killing which caused the
trial, The jurymen who had
acquitted him were the witnesses.
and The trial Judge performed the
ceremony, Tho jury donated the
license. Brock shot |. A. Byck'
ham last eummer, alleging that
he cursed Mrs, Kelley.
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22

Commenting upon the Records
prediction that candidates for
Congress in this district would be
few and far between if Congress-
man Brundidge should ask an
other term, the Democrat Of
Mammoth Spring says: eek
actly 50. Brundidge is not only
2good hustler in campaign but
he has a record that no one can
afford to criticise and that no one
will vote against. If he should
inter the race for senator, how
&Ver, and thus leave the field
open as to congressman, as it
low stands we believe we shall
Usk Hon. Harry Ponder, of
Walnut Ridge, to make the race
for congressman. He is cong.
rSssional timber"
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22

F'We have more trouble in col
Noting subscriptions from the rich
than the poor" says the st Louis
christian Advocate. All news
|papers have observed that, as a
general rule, poor people keep
their subscriptions paid up better
than many who are considered
Well-to do, Many men who are
lcomiortably fixed financially seem
10 rest secure in the fact that
they are "good," while people
Whom they owe small amounts
Would be very glad indeed to
have them. Money pays debts,
and q mans mere ability to pay
doesn't.
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22
The state of Arkansas cannot

81 The state of Arkansas cannot
eecure adequate fire insurance.
There is no getting around that
Proposition, and the legislature
Il not in the mood to provide
nipple insurance facilities by ex-
empting the old.line companies
ffo11 he provisions Of the anti
nv bill. Really, the legislature
Y st so much to blame. The
Democratic platform has been
burdened for years with a demand
for rigid law against trusts.
The antitrust act on the statute
books today seems to have had
The endorsement of the people,
Ind we cannot blame the legis-
lature from refusing to exempt
The insurance trust from it's pro-
Visions. There should not be one
law for one trust and one for
Mother. If the antitrust law
il not good for the people, let the
people demand its repeal. But,
While it is a law, let it be en-
forced.
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22

The Bentonville Sun very COR
rectly says the difference be-
tween a statesman and a politi-
clan is, the former advocates
what he believes will rebound to
the best interests of his country,
whether or not it seems popular
at the moment, while the latter
takes positions on questions Of
state, which in his judgment, will
be quite fad at the time Of next
election,
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22

The little city of Jackson,
Tennessee, declared against the
licensed saloon in no uncertain
tones at an election held last
Friday. The vote was 937 against
license and 3 for license. Early
on election morning 1900 women
and children began marching the
streets, singing prohibition songs
and carrying banners. They
worked at the polls all day, serv-
ing lunch to the voters.
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22

The bill providing for the an.
nexation of Argenta to Little
Rock was reconsidered a few
days ago in the State Senate and
passed. 1t is said the bill will be
almost sure to pass the lower
house. This bill has caused q
whole lot of fuss, although the
Pulaski county delegation in the
legislature is unanimous in favor
of it, in fact, was elected on the
issue of bringing Argenta back to
the capital city.
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22

Congressman De Almond OF
Missouri, besides being possessed
'of ability, has a sense of wit
For instance, seeing in q recent
cartoon, the conventional repre-.
sentation OF the Democratic party
ias n donkey, Mr.. De Almond
observed: 81 object to the use
Of such party symbols. 1t Is in
aQlting to the Democratic party
ia picture it rs an ass, and be-
alRes, it is not true, for II we did
l4&tually stand for the asses Of the
1untry, We should DO In the
jority."
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22

Several newspapers are rejoic-
ing over the fact that "their'
members Of the legislature voted
against the resolution to extend
the session sixty days. However,
it may be safely said that these
very members were heartily glad
the resolution carried, and had
canvassed the situation pretty
thoroughly before they voted no,
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22

A Chicago preacher says hell
is q place Of strong drink,
tobacco, baseball, theaters and
open-work shirtwaists, Doubt
less when the preacher made this
statement q large part Of his
congregation thought everything
would be cosy and homelike as
you please in hell.
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22

|p'he way the world wass today,
ls not at all safe for a man TO
3al a ham Of meat unless he
shes TO got into serious trouble.
\, Il while In the confidence Of
2 public, he can get away with
amount covering thousands OF
lars he appears to be as safo
IN the law as safe can be.
j some fools boast Of the
4 2jesty OF the law. IT'S all boHh,
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22

IA bill has passed both houses
az the Arkansas Legislature
Broviding that jail sentences
uay be imposed upon persons
nQhvieted Of carrying concealed
In this state. Tho bill
lnakos IL discretionary with
judgos and juries to impose u
jail penalty In addition to a fine,
lhere was determined opposition
~ q bill which made 1t obligatory
tron courts to impose jail sent.
enccs In such casos.
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22
The Beehe News SAWS there |

The Beebe News says there is
not an intelligent person in the
state who does not know that
during his three terms as Cover.
nor Jeff Davis saved the tax
payers Of the state many thous-
ands Of dollars. Now the people
at large can put their upper
stories to test,
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22
At tho close of the session tn,

At tho close of the session the
Arkansas legislators will have
spent 120 days legislating for the
good Of The country, and will
have received S720 each, besides
mileage, as compensation. We
hope the members will feel as il
they earned the money. Doubt
less no one else will.
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22

A man, who declared he had
not u relative in the world, diod
in ST Louis the other day, leav-
Ing q fortune OF 100000, 1t was
not long until about sixteen
cousins, uncles and aunts had un-
covered themselves.
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22

Two negroes were lynched at
Monroe, Louisiana, before break
fast ono morning last week. The
negroes ehould at least have been
fed first. It's asking too much
that they should be called upon
to furnish entertainment for o
mob on empty stomachs.
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22

A Melbourne paper makes the
statement that u. l.. billiard, on
attorney Of that place, will prob
ably be before the next demo.
cratic primaries As o candidate
for prosecuting attorney.
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22

It will be several weeks yet be-
iore Governor Little is able 10 re-
turn TO Little Rock and resume
bis duties,
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22
NORTH ARKANSAS

has bought and shipped 10000
head of cattle and hogs the past
few months.
The Law and Order League is
a new organization at Newark. Tt
has placed candidates for town
offices in the field.
Mont Ramey, formerly gro
Gerry drummer in this part of the
state, has been appointed post.
master at Mountain View.
The lizard circuit court will
convene at Melbourne next Mon
day. The docket consists of AZ
criminal cases and Is civil cases.
County Examiner E. A. Shaver
of Jackson county favors a COM
pulsory education law for this
state, compelling parents to send
their children to school.
William Akin, an old pioneer
Of this part of the state, died last
week at Cotter, and was buried
at Batesville with Masonic hon
ors. He was 81 years old.
Will Totty of independence
county, who spent some time in
the insane asylum, but was re-
leased lately, has become violent
again and will be taken back to
the asylum.
Prof. John A. Wilkes, formerly
a prominent teacher Of Sharp and
independence counties, is now a
train auditor on the Mobile &
Ohio railroad, with headquarters
at Mobile, Alabama.
In the circuit court at Walnut
Ridge last week Joe Gibson, who
killed Jake Driscoll near Laura
town, was convicted Of man
slaughter and sentenced to three
years in the penitentiary.
The body of Simon Steward, an
aged negro, was found dead near
Diaz a few days ago. The COR
oner's verdict was that Steward
came to his death from a gun
shot wound at the hands of un-
known parties.
The Western Methodist, pub
lished at Little Rock, says that
Rev. George Brinsfield, who died
recently in lizard county at the
age of 10S years, was undoubted-
ly the oldest Methodist on earth
at the time Of his death.
B. F. Cash, writing in the New.
ark Journal, says locusts appear
every thirteenth year, and adds:
"If you do not hear their shrill
noise before the 10th Of May,
will take down my sign and say
know nothing about bugology."
One day last week near May.
nard the clothing Of the 4.year-
old son Of Richard Foshee caught
fire from a burning stalk pile in
the field, and before assistance
reached him the little fellow was
burned 80 badly that he died in a
few hours.
The grand jury Of Baxter
county last week returned an in.
dictment for murder in the first
degree against Austin Baker,
who shot and killed DR.. W. +.
Noe a few weeks ago, The trial
will come up at tho next term OF
tho court.
A young man named Clapp
was run over and killed In the
railroad yards at lloxio a few
nights ago, While crossing the
track, his foot became hung and
before he could extrieate himself
the cars passed over him, killing
him instantly.
A negro driver, who was haul.
ing goods from Guion for Par
sons q Co. OF Melbourne, at
toonlad IA oroaa n swollen creek |
Sharp County record., 1907-03-22

A frog farm has been started
at Sloan Springs by n number
OF citizens, who expect TO rsisA
frogs for the market.