The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1907-08-08

ATcHIsoN CLOSE SIGHTS.


II isshard to keep out Of work and
out OF Jail q the same time.
II angels are rs nice as girls Of 10
or AZ, we shall be satisfied.
The only thing some men are ever
willing to save is the country.
How a man will Q a at fate if he
loses a job he didn't try to hold.
The only way some women have OF
showing their love is by jealousy.
People naturally shy from the MAI
who suspects everyone Of dishonesty.
The woman who tells everything she
hears, always hear so much. too.
With some people the price of peace
Is complete surrender to their ideas.
One nice thing about tradition Is
that nc one cares whether it is true pr
not.
Politicians and pugilists are very
similar in the matter OF their retire.
lments.
When you do exactly as you please,
remember you are the only person
pleased.
A farmers idea of laziness is to let
h sun beat you at getting up in the.
r%norning.,
The average mans idea of religious
liberty & the privilege of staying home
from church.
If it were not for the funerals, there
wouldn't be any family reunions in
some IafnllleS. HM
II a girl is hon1ely, 1T is safe to as
sert that She Is a great deal of help
to her mother.
The man who has fish given him is
h only n who feels obliged to be-
lieve fish stories.
Every time we see atboy of IL, smok-.
Ing, we confess to feeling a diSpoSi-
ton to spank lin.
After a heart has been broken a few
times, the healing process becomes
greatly simplified.
What has become of the old fash
Toned girl who said she wouldn't marry
the best man living?
A stubborn man always says he is
willing to change his mind If you can.
convince him he is wrong.
A man can think of a lot of reasons
why he lost his money. and not once
think of his poor judgment.
Usually 1t is easy enough to start an
argument with the man who has plenty
of his words at his command.
I The man who is too fat, or too old
Ito run, always seems to have the most
trouble with his hat blowing Off.
The man who. says he lives "close to
nature is not the one vol will find
doing the heavy work on a farm.
Every man would be pretty well sat
sttsfied If he We're as important as a
book agent tries to make him believe.
How disappointed the average girl IL
when she shows a young man her
photo and he doesn't ask her for one.
i A really popular young man is one
who can show the visiting girl a good
time without damaging his local fences.
/, The man of artistic temperament
sees great beauty in a wonan's soul
Iii she looks all right in other partic-
ulars.
Since they have gone out of fashion.
"a man can boost his reputation as a
fool pretty fast by wanting to fight a
duel.
I, The man who thinks he is wise
enough for his own lawyer, probably
fs. ii he is good enough to keep out of
trouble.
What has become of the old fash
honed woman who saved the train from
destruction by tagging it with her red
petticoat.
The corset affords men what satisfac-
ton they can get out Of the belief that
women are not as cool in warm weather
as they look.
The card club women may laugh at
the woman who asks If the joker is
used in playing whist, but the men
admire her.
Il it is referred to as a financial
transaction" there is probably less real
money involved than if it were merely
called a deal"
Say to a girl who owns a diamond
ring. You nave a pretty diamond"
!saiAo NAlC 10 .SulC u SdG - NNI u ~ III lI
needs cleaning"
Every day you hear people complaing
or being imposed upon by visitors. Do
visitors know this? What's the matter
with the hotels?
What has become Of the old fash
Toned woman who expected that the
boy who played cards would eventually
become a gambler?
There is nearly every kline of a town
IN this country except the one in which
the loyal citizens won't insist they have
the best LOOKING girls.
There are : lany qualities which may
go toward L .aking a man a favorite
with his fellows. but wearing good
clothes isn't among them.
Gossip is more entertaining than
statistics. and for the average man
about as effective as a means Of ac-
curing reliable information.
Lectures on economy don't reduce a
boys expenditures for peanuts and
licorice until he wants to save money
to buy skates or q baseball outfit.
a woman may have the milk man.
the grocer and the butcher bluffed,
but she always tries to be diplomatic
in her dealings with the washer
omar
We have noticed that people who do
eXactly as they please, whether their
trends liBa 1t or not, get along about as
Wen as tn use who are always trying to
please.
The mal who only half tries to do
everything else, puts forth a pretty
good effort lei it comes to complain
ing about the lack Of appreciation in
this world.
A scientist asserts that a sperm
whale could swallow an automobile.
Don't be surprised If you see a few
sperm whales Topping around some
farmers barnyard.
Pictures Of last years graduates in
thefr white dresses are being carried
from he parlor to the spare bedroom to
make room on the parlor wall for this
years crop.
III order to thoroughly enjoy auto
mob1llng, a mar should nave at least
i've machines costing not less thar
S4,o00 each. He hould also employ
an expert machinist to care for the
machines and two drivers. OF course
q machine shop and a house in which
to store the machines would be neces-
sary.
Storm Signal.
Billy ran from the head of the stairs
where he had taken in the gist of the talk
at the dining table below. In the nursery
he found has younger brother.