Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1907-07-03
HE TERROR'S DINNER
"RattlesnakeS on Toast" Was
the Cowboys Order.
BUT He MET WITH HIS MATCH

The Promptness With Which the
Tough Waiter Served the Dish Took
the Terror's Nerve Awsy-The Re-
past and the Final Request.
Turpin established a restaurant i'm
Yuma, and among Turpin's original
| employees was n waiter named Job
/ Straight. who could shoot with great
precision. play draw poker with un-
! varying success and pack eighteen
I plates Of miscellaneous grub upon one
bare arm ut one time. He could exc
| cute all the prevailing melodies either
on piano or guitar. and he possessed
/ the most tremendous baritone voice
ever heard IN Arizona. why. men some
/ times went 70 Turpin's Just 70 hear Joe
deliver gastronomic orders No per-
feet description can be given Of that
voice, however. except to say that at
times It really did make things clatter.
Once a fresh young cowboy from
near ella Bend entered Turpin's for
/ Christmas dinner who took a startling
dropped thud-like at q table and rough
~ shouted TO Straight:
SAY. there. Badly, Bring me some
grub."
Job was at first appalled,; but. recov-
| ering his reserve limit OF cquanimity.
he brushed an imaginary breadcrumb
from the frescoed tablecloth and
whisked bill Of fare from the varie-
gated castor and placed it before the
new young terror OF the Bend
Take it away cried the latter in
tones that could give Straights ordI-
nary, everyday baritone castle and
checkmate It in five moves I don't
want 20 read your darned old tract
l don't care a darn who came into the
world 10 save sinners. Bring me some
Srub-g-r-u-b, Grub. Grub. Grubr'
what do YOU want:"
"R1ttlesnakcs on toast, And I want
you TO hump yourselfr'
whats that:"
"rve given my order, you baldheaded
old cigar store sign, and l want you 20
get move on ycprself, p. d. q. Rattle
snakes on toast"
"Rattlesnakes on toast.' cried Job TO
the cook In accents that would have
paralyzed Carl Formes had that old
basso profundo been living and heard
them.
"R0ttlesnakes on toast" was the re
verberating response from the cook
upon receiving the order.
There were 4 dozen or more people II
: the restaurant. and their eyes We're n
once turned on the young person from
] the Bend and the Infatuated waiter.
IN the meantime the cook had takcr
e 4 big catfish and cut IL into four strip.
4 and rolled these strips in batter. s,
: that they much resembled the Wand or
dered. and after placing them in IN,
{ frying pan he stuck his head out OF tn
n kitchen and shouted 10 Job:
o You want them rattlers rare or wei
- doner"
The walter repeated the interrogation.
in a cyclonic way. and the terror re
Piled in as violent tone and mamie
q rs he could command. well done. Wit
: plenty Of gravy and Chilli Colorado"
r And then job Numbered 10 the cook p:
5 well done. with plenty of Chilli Colo
:; RADIO. hot as --. and noccasin gray,
Z on the side and brochettes Of SAM
]
I There was an insantaneously dea
q silence in that restaurant. and all eve
q were again east upon the terror an
+ the waiter. The former turned ashe
Y pale and began - weaken percepubly
4 while job Sazed IT his victim
Il Maybe YOU don't think we can serv
4 all the market Affords" muttered Jol
= Maybe YOU don't like moccasin gray
T or brochettes In mode Maybe yo
h amt hungry
Il SAY, You've got me- ain't huuCr,
- SO help me- l couldn't eat u single har
boiled egg. Countermand that Gu-ne
order, old man. and III pay all T.,
penses and set EN- UP rs long rs any
!" body can drink. Beg pardon. gentl
D. men, AL. Ny first attempt to be te
n ror-pardon me. gentlemen. It's n
D. laSt-'
x And then he handed his revolver {
. Job and added:
i Take that pistol, old man. Is
2 present and promise me that the ne,
.e time any burned fool comes in Lel
10 and calls for rattleSnakes on toa.
you'll shoot him deadr'
,e But Straight was too raving mad 4
!. the way through TO willingly emera
from a situation only tolerably It
Umphant. So he took the weapon jus
n rs the order was being placed on Il
D. table and, pointing It ut the terro
exclaimed:
Now, then. my boy. dump yourSe
into that chair and eat them snakes
-, bones. skin and aHr'
i The young fellow did IS he was con
:, manded. but after finishing his reDa,
II staggered the uncOmpromiSing Job d
:, shouting:
n Il say. Badly bring NE unoth,
- plate Of snakes" '-Dcnver News.
N Wanted New Ones.
\ traveller putting up at fifth ella
hotel brought the boots" up with Il
angry StOrming.
Want Your room changed Sii