Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1907-08-29
pylgs tie
<~PrsCc
NN~NONN0~


Washington Herald.
Isn't it nearly time to organize the
Society of Daughters of Presidential
Possibilities New YORK Mail.
\ bachelor can become very fond of
spending his nights at the club by get
ting married.-New York Press.
Emperor William believes in a sim
pie diet for his fighting forces. Most
of them already get it.-Boston Tran
script.
Mr.. Rockefeller says true success lies
in doing good. Standard Oil victims
have always been done that way.-New
York World.
Pittsburg now claims a population
of 100000. And less than fifty of them
have been found to be good citizens
Philadelphia Inquirer.
To administer exact justice is diff
cult. A Chicago man who poisoned six
people is to be hanged, but only once.
Philadelphia Ledger.
President Roosevelt warmly approves
the idea of teaching boys to shoot
but, it is hoped, not with toy rifles
Philadelphia Inquirer.
A Florida farmer cleared 81 200 on
one acre of cabbage in the spring.
There is money in some cabbage heads,
it seems.-Washingto Herald.
If the House of Commons is "the best
club in England" the United States
Senate is the leading matrimonial bu-
reau in America.-New York Mail.
An increase of 81, 900 first-cabin pas
sengers to Europe for the first six
months of 1907 means many, many
souvenir postal cards-New York Mail
Don't kiss babies; it is dangerous"
says physician. 1t is also moderately
dangerous, under certain circumstances,
to kiss a grown-up.-Washingto Her
aid
President Roosevelt puts in several
hours day chopping wood. Not being
a candidate for anything, he does not
have to bother about saving it.-Chi-
cago News.
When Fighting Bob Evans says there
isn't going to be any war with Japan
that settles it. If he can do without
a fight the rest of US must-Philadel-
phia Press.
Il is noticed with regret that New
York's all-night police court is crowd
ed with business. Prosperity of this
sort can't be commended.-Cle
Plain Dealer
In Germany jury in an important
murder case was selected in ten min
utes. Over there stupidity and ignor-
ance are not requirements.-Phila
phia Ledger.
BombSa are still flying through the air
in Russia, though it is such an every
day occurrence that the cable doesn't
pretend to report all the Incidents
Philadelphia Press.
Now that a Chicago professor has
discovered that sea gulls can talk,
some of the things the wild waves have
been saying may be traced to their
Sources.-New York World.
A scientist estimates that the suns
heat will last for 100000 years long
err What a long time it will take to
prove that he doesn't know anything
about it .-Philadelphia Inquirer.
The final decree of divorce having
been entered in the Castellane case,
another is added to the long list of
matrimonial warnings which will have
no effect whatever.-New York Sun.
A man who sold Strawberries in
Washington in boxes that had raised
| bottoms has been fined $3.50. The judge
ought to start earlier in the strawberry
season next year.-New York World.
Swell society in Newport seems sur
prised to learn that an ape dresses as
well and behaves as well at the table
as its own members, but the rest of the
world is not urprised.-Philadelph
Record.
The Council Bluffs clergyman who
promised to hang himself if the maxi
mum fine was imposed on the Standard
Oil Company is strangely inactive.
Why does he not get busy ?-Milwau-
| kee Journal.
Mr.. Schwab thinks the United States
can build five battleships to Japan's
one, and as he happens to be in that
line of business he would no doubt
like to see the fact demonstrated
Washington Post.
I'm this great, whirling, pushing,
Brisbane, there is no substitute for
brains" What a pity, when so many
people are sadly in need of a substi-
tute Washington Post.
The fact that some German officers
were in a balloon over Berlin three
hours ought not to be regarded as rec
ofd-breaking. The Gar of Russia mas
been up in the air for several years
Louisville Courier-Journal
Another promoter of libraries says
that you can tell a man by his books.
Yet only the other day river pirate
was shot dead and they found volume
entitled THE Life of St John the Di-
vine" in his pocket.-New York Sun.
Before the offer of some Western
farmers of 50 a week with board and
the company of their daughters is ac-
cepted by prospective harvest hands
they will probably have to forward
photographs of the girls.-Indianapo-
lis News
AD army paymaster is said to have
lost his life as the result of handling
money, and yet the world will be a
good deal older when creditors demand
tat money must be sterilized before
they accept it for debt.-Cleveland
Ilain Dealer
Judge Landis," says the Atlanta
Constitution, has placed the country