The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1907-08-03
y S5sskSHES
A6SsazlGFgN
~N0~~~NNN~

ZzRgIaTTNENS%S$<<%> j Wy
do you believe In signs?" Sure.
How else would people know what
business you We're in?"-Baltimore
American.
A great many authors started in life :
barefooted, and some of 'en to-day are :.
holding good positions in shoe fac
tories.-Atlanta Constitution.
Crawford-How In the world can
you pay social visits to your janitor?
Crabshaw-It makes me feel SO good
to see his wife boss him.-Puck. II
But why should keep books?"
"Well, you would know just where you
stood the end Of the month" But,
my dear fellow, why rub it in?'-Life.
She (after a quarreD-I wouldn't
cry for the best man living; so there!
He-You don't have to cry for him,
dear; you've got him.-Indianapolis
Star.
Managing Director-Well, and what
are your qualifications for the post of
night Waterman? Applicant-Well, sir,
for one thing, the least noise wakes me
up.-Bystander.
Deacon Clovertop-How are you get
tim ON with your incubator? Farmer
Meddergrass-Why, the dern thing
haint laid an egg since l got it
Philadelphia Record.
Yabsley-I wish l could break my
wife of the habit of presenting me with
cigars every opportunity she gets. Jol.
lyboy-Do as l do. Smoke them in the
house.-Town and Country.
A Carsone-I hear your typewritist left
you in buff Gebhart-Yes, l put my
foot In 1t. Carsone-What did you dol
Gebhart-I had dinner with my wife
one day last week.-The Bohemian.
Can l take joker" exclaimed the
press humorist. Say, l can take q
joke and revamp it so that it would
, hardly be recognized by the man who
originated it."-Philadelphia Ledger.
; Rollingstone Nomoss-Don't let's 60
in here. Dis woman keeps dog.
, Let's go on to de next place. latter
: don Torn-De woman at de next place
keeps a wood pile.-Philadelphia Rec
t ord.
"Id like" said Mrs. Henpeck, Ito
= see the man l was afraid of! $50
would 1" replied Henry, edging toward
the door. I'm fact, I'd even like to
;. shake his hand. Chicago Record-H Her
aid.
: "Ya-as, sub, All was a slave befo'
: de wah, subj" But when the war
was over you got your freedom" mo,
;. sub; All was married den, an Abs
a been married evan sence."-Philadel.
e phia Press.
y 81 thought you said 1t was sleigh
% ing party? at was" But you went
" in an automobile" 81 know we did
"a Our staying consisted of running ovel
4. two dogs and a chicken. cleveland
u Plain Dealer.
ee 81 thought you told me Miss Scream
er couldn't sing" $50 l did" But
=, have heard her at social gathering
ii myself a number of times" II SAT-
ct she can't sing; l never said sh
r. n't."-Baltimore American.
Or George, mother is coming to stay
!, month with us. l wish you would Sent
- her a railway ticket to come here" 81
do better than that. I'll send her
he round-trip excursion ticket good TO
FIVE days"-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
'r. "What can we do to improve tn
II. present method Of dancing?" thunder
e ed the parson; dancing is mere hug
- ging set to music" 1--WE might ell
out the music" softly suggested til
"a bad young man in the rear Of the hal
te- Answers.
81 wish to complain" said the Easie
bride, haughtily, "about that honr yo
sold me. 1t was tough" "Tougl
ma'am," stammered the grocer. I'VE
; tough. 1 made a pie of 1t and my hui
r nc band could hardly cut it."-ChicaG
~ Chronicle.
~ She of 'O7-Now that you al
In through, do you honestly believe thu
a,s college education has helped yor
10 He Of 'O6-Helped me! Well, yeste
IN. day l signed contract to coach u
Ida Montbraska university football tea
.ho for a period of five years.-Puck.
tho 81 thought you were working {
IF Crotchett's house." said the hou
o7 painters friend. Il was going to-" l
ned piled the painter, "but we had qua
nm rel and he said he'd put the paint (
ner hlmseil. Anu uiu NC uo ~.
cod that's where he put most of it"-Ph
adelphia Press.