Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-08-31
GETTING HUMAN AGAIN AT
OLD BILL MULDOONS PLACE

only few of them had come up To stating
the real facts as to the indomitable dis
cipIining methods OF the head OF the Null
doom Institution But Muldoon had results
TO show for his system. Many scores OF
columns have been printed lately-since
secretary Root was discovered NJ Nulaonn'.
piace-about the sinsulary heroic met hods
Muldoon employs In his making over OF men
In Dad physical shape but 1t would be-
aitcut TO eNaSserate the Before and
After stories OF these cases Nobody who
writes about Muldoon can be accused NJ
attempting To boom his curious instit,l-
uon Tor he always has three times as many
cases as he can receive on his waiting
liSt, ana his scheme had made him an in
dependently rich man long before his plant
| received any newspaper exploitation at all.
me difference between the average man
as ne looks when he goes I'm for the Null
doom system and he appears when he
comes away from the place could not pos
Sioiy De greater than those seemingly wildly
eNagscrated Before and After cuts that
USED 10 be run with the old time patcnt
medicine advertisements
You'll see. for example, some almost
"own. and-out elderly stock broker lining
up with the Muldoon bunch at tn, pl9ro
up in Westchester. The broker is a rounder
ana an all-nght man He Is fat wheezy
purE. pouchy about the eyes grossly
neaVy; color OF saffron. SD scant OF breath
'hat he chokes in the night soft as
woman. and muscles sbsurdly finbby liver
IN incredibly bad shape and IN general a
perfect example of modern New Yorker
everything. When. after about six weeks,
he comes away from the Muldoon plant.
and reaches New York his friends don't
know him. hardly believe their senses
ne mlddle-aged rounder is trig alert
sprlngy or step. down to his ideal weight
color ruddy. eyes clear as old IA shioned
taw agate classics" muscles working up
and down. and in play with every move
ment, and the whole mechanism working
with the precision of a thousand dollar
"atch. I've seen scores OF cases like this,
ana some of them were little short of amaz-
ing.
But going through the Muldoon thing
isn't any snap" every man who ever
braced himself to stand the ordeal. and
stood It, will willingly tesilfq. 1t means.
especially at the outset that kind of IA
tigue which seems unbeara be-aching mus
cles. throbbing legs. acute thumpings
throughout the system that feel like the
growing pains Of childhood. and sub
mission to dictation such as few men. and
especially the type of rather arrogant sue
cessful men of affairs, who visit the Null
doom place, are used to.
And, as a simple matter Of course. this
discipline thing is at the bottom of the
whole success Of the treatment.
How the System Works.
Any man. sufficiently well-to do to afford
the time and the apparatus, can-or he may
imagine he can-go In for period OF absti-
hence from harmful indulgences tossing the
medicine. ball about, riding horseback. box
ing, calisthenics. pulling weights, and all
that sort OF thing.
But not one man in a hundred thousand
can force himself to do that stuff systemat-
tcally and with undertaking method. with
out somebody by to bulldoze him and keep
him worked up to the pitch where in the
midst of the misery of pain, he Will keep
on feeling that he's in need of such streuu-
osity. That's where the discipline part Of
II comes in.
A very celebrated actor was al the Null
doom institution while l was there. The
actor had only reached the place few
hours before my arrival He was. in fact.
just returning from the long horseback ride
with Muldoon. and the rest of the caval-
cade as | got in Dismounting. the bunch
We're required by Muldoon to strip for
shower bath. The actor was taking his time
about that. though, for he had sonnet hing
else in mind He dropped around to tho
side of the house for a cigarette. Now,
Mudoon, while he allows the smokers a
cigar after each meal, hates cigarettes with
a virulent hatred, and every man he takes
in must promise, before being accepted.
that he will not smoke cigarette while
he is at the place. The actor, however. re-
garded the promise he gave as a mere lit
tie amiable white one. and he was taking
his cigarette when Mudoon who missed
him from the bathing party. strolled around
to where the actor was putting away and
inhaling the smoke into his lungs.
you've just time to make the 3:i7,"
Muldoon said to the actor man. the iron
but rather agreeable smile on his face.
How" said the actor.
The 3:47 train for New York. said
Muldoon Your stuff is being packed
now The blackboard will be around
presently. Here is the months payment
in advance that you made me, and he
pulled roll from his pocket and shi cided
off the money the actor had given him
upon being received.
That was all The actor at first pro-
tested. then became angry. then lIaplored.
All to no purpose. Muldoon turned his
back upon him and walked into the
house. The actor followed him, still i'm
ploring. and promised to cut out the
cigarettes. No use. Muldoon went to his
office, and when the actor demanded to
see him sent out word that he was too
busy to be seen and that he couldn't see
him any more anyhow. The actor took
the BAT for New York all right
Fixing Senator Depew.
Senator Depew was a wreck. certainly
in body. and with mind that was peril
ously close to being clouded, when he
went to Muldoons as a last resort
couple of years ago. Being Senator De-
pew. he naturally figured that the thing
would be somewhat eased up in his case;
that he wouldn't have to go through the
, stunts required of the other elderly men
of less distinction.
And when he was ordered into the
class of calisthenics with the other old
timers of the class the senator smilinGly
advanced toward the platform on which
Muldoon was standing in order to tell
him. in his humorous way, just why the
caIisthenics business wouldn't answer in
his case.
Sit down. SIR" said Muldoon. calmly
noticing the senator approaching him
But" Depew started to say, that we'll
known oleaginous smile on his features.
Il want to-
sit down. sir" said Muldoon, sharply
this time
Just moment" said the senator, bit
chagrned In appearance, but still ad-
vancng upon Muldoon. I've had one
amusing experience with this calls
themes experience. and L want to tell
you
las you We're" said Muldoon to the
class in calisthenics. bringing them to a
standstill Now, sir" turning to Sena-
tor Depew. Il want you to sit down till
l get through with this crowd. This Is
not jokefest Neither is 1t pocket edi
ton of Half Hours With Celebrated
American HumOristS. It's work half
hour, and | am busy. Sit down. sir
Senator Depew sat down. And he stayed
sat till the class WAS through. From that
hour he was the most tractabIe man on tho