The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1907-09-14
DoNALDsoNVILLE, La SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER a. 1907.
NEW ORLEANS LETTER.
An Amusing stunt Not ON the Bill-Ise.
suit of Gubernatorial Election Force
easted-TIm Murphy Pieases
Play-Goers at Tnlanes
New Orleans. La, Sept. q. 1907.

hdppSu0u ~ H1buSSS Oh dnuSIHR
stunt which wasn't on the regular bill,
but nevertheless had every vaudeville
number backed clean of the stage for
genuine funniness. In the seat ahead
OF me sat fat old gentleman built
along comic supplement- lines and with
a complexion like an apoplectic to-
mato. His neck was one OF those
layer cake effects and bubbled up
from his low, turned-down collar to
finally lose itself in festive fringe of
grey hair surmounted by shiny bald
pate barred to the coy breezes of West
End. had been listening abstract
edly to tall girl with contralto
cast of voice tremolo-ing dreaming,
Love, of Thee" in a fashion which
made the title sound like misnomer
and rather suggested 'Scre aiming,
Love, of Thee, as a more appropria ate
name, and I was ripe for something
new and diverting to happen when a
mosquito OF the foxy, touch and-go,
aggrav ating species that are enough
to make an angel euss his relations,
buzzed boisterously across my range
of vision and made for the middle
layer of the old gentleman's S neck. 7
became so interested in the operations
of that particular stegomia faciata,
or sonata obligato, or whatever his
scientific appelation may have been,
that | was more than mildly excited
when the old gentleman, growing con-
scious of the disturbance at the base
of his sectionally constructed neck,
lifted pudgy hand and administered
resounding whack upon his collar
bone. Off buzzed the mosquito in a
dignifed, unhurried flight, after the
manner of one accustomed to sustain
ing hair breadth escapes and in no
wise concerned over his last near
fatal encounter. Nor was that initial
design upon his life lesson to him
not he; back he buzzed in a minute,
and presently aGghted on the bald top
OF the old gentleman's head after a
thorough investigation of the sur
rounding premises and no end of
spasmodic samplings of ear and neck.
I could tell by the tense expression of
the old gentleman's back that he was
just waiting for that mosquito to get
gooo and interested before he let fall
1
his final avenging blow. Then, lifting
a cautious hand, he administered q
| whack upon his own head which I am
sure made him see stars-and missed
the mosquito, of course. After that,
the old chaps contortions were ludi-
crous to behold. His efforts to
slaughter that mosquito became more
determined with each succeeding fail
ure, and his self-inaicted punishments
in the process of annihilation were
funnier than you can possibly imagine.
Red and perspiring, consumed with
impotent fury, he began to grow con-
spieuously amusing to the surround
ing multitude, and still that pug
nacious insect, with pleasantly de-
tached air, coyly settled and buzzed
away, settled and buzzed away, in a
fashion which maddened the old gentle
man to the point of frenzy. Finally,
growing bolder with repeated escapes,
the mosquito chased around to the
front, and with courage that was
positively foolhardy, charged straight
into the face of the enemy. Right on
the old gentleman's nose he settled
and there's where the Napoleonic in
sect met his Waterloo. With whack
that nearly reduced his perspiring
features to pulp, the old gentleman
slapped himself viciously in the face.
Of flew his glasses and down they fell
with fatal crash. "Oh, I say" ex-
claimed young man beside him,
struggling to retain his composure,
That's too bad, sir; you broke your
glasses" "Broke my glasses?" splut.
tered the infuriated old gentleman, 'l
don't give d-n if did, young man;
I KILLED THAT MosoUITol"
was going down town in Prytania
car Monday morning and here were
some of the snatches of conversation
that came to me from among the bust.
ness men who occupied seats near
mine:
ST tell you from present indications
Wilkinson is going to sweep the
state
81 know for certain that Sanders
has lead.pipe-einch-''
"Of course, Wilkinson will carry
Ascension, but I happen to know thai
St. Mary will turn in three votes fol
Sanders to every Ascension one fol
Wilkinson
"Wi1kinson's record is good anG
clean, he's a gentleman through anG
through, and he's the kind of mar
we want for governor of Louisiana
ut gets me weary this business o
Wilkinson perpetually prating: I'm /
gentleman; I'm gentleman'-''
"sanders is the real, right artiel,
and he's going to get there with botl
feet
and SO on, ad infnitum, while l sa
there and smiled q sm0le f,f datachef