The Montgomery advertiser., 1907-10-13
DRIFTWO o OD
BY rHrL .. ARMSTRONG;.

| DY PHIL a. ABMsrRoN0. girl who drank ! bottle of ink by mis- take wasn't a chorus lady.
 when Gladys Vanderbilt married Count L.sszic s:eshsnTs for name she got It all right
 The Chicago pork packers dropped their "h,s' at the old English dinner, ssn sSf yen os Ss' sss sa'p
 A New York preacher has been tell ing his congregation that the end of the exact date but, after January 1, Georgia will be dry enough to burn.-- Atlanta Constitution. Isn't this dry humor for you?
 Now the Forakerites are going to trot out Hughes as the strongest op- ponent to beat Taft to the Republican nomination for President. Surely he the party as Avoirdupois Billy!
 Well, with the advent of winter. the poor old North Pole will have vaca- covered.
 What would the magazine poets 60 without October?
 
 Hockefeiler's physician says we arg Doesn't he think a round-shouldered man over imbibes?
 And now the New York Mail dubs 1t thoiIeringhouston .-- Wough--yoush-f and then some!
 The difference between gsnspla and the "wooily Vest is that In the one country they get 1t in the neck while In the other they get in the masazines for dynaniting ;. N
 Phra Ratancyapli, the siamsse Min ister f ill Maybe that's what he's When the frost Is on the pumpkin
 The "angel' doesn't mind. Just so 1t isn't on the play
 His money is behind.
 From labor there shall come forth eest .--Longfeilow
 But, alas not from labor strikes!
 The Bishap of London wants to see American life as 1t really is. You've met Roosevelt and seen the strenuous side of 1t, isn't that enough?
 The pure food law ought to make them state on the bottle how many headaches there are inside.-Baltimore
 If they did people wouldn't buy.
 A- A-
 Foodstuffs are getting so high that the dear old onion Hgill yet arrive to the dignity of an aristocratic delicacy.
 
 Alfred Austin is writing a poem of one hundred stanzas. and the English Government is permitting it.
 The Washington Herald rises up to say that it is no nrouder of any of It's discoveries than it Is of Mayor Tune of Shelbyviiles Tenn. So much for hav- ing musical name.
 A physician says to drink sour milk constantly prolongs life. If our phy- sician put us on such a diet it would have a tendency to shorten life-who's life we'll leave the reader to guess.
 There are no birds in last years nest. And there are no dimes in last years vest. (Though it's but humanrnature for your wife to poke her finger in the pocket, to see.)
 The boy stood on the burning deck q
 Whence all but him had fed. For he thought to get clippings by the ' Of what the papers said.
 A Baltimore professor has discovered that the songs of Solomon were not written by Solomon. Those Baltimore people have to start a new sensation now that pr. osler is out of date.
 A healthy adult breathes from four teen to twenty times a minute, except when his wife calls to him from the top step when he is trying to go to bed on the hatrack, when it becomes somewhat accelerated. Meet your friends with "smile"- especially if you are candidate for ofilce.
 Yes. even the plumber sometimes has his pipe dreams. A man seldom goes to the dogs over the loss of his puppy-iove' Time and tide wait for no man and the fve-doilar -an-hour motor car waits for no woman. The Autumn Moon. In the light of the autumn moon, my Come s let us sit and croon. my dearie. As we stroll down Lovers Lane. The night birds whistle is sad my But you you and I are glad, my daarie, We know nor grief nor pain. while the kind old moon peeps on. my A moment looks, then is gone, my dearie,
 And ysu tremNie close to my And we shape our gaze to the farthest Where seraphim and cherub are, Where the tired souls rest. | Oh, we cannot know or understand-- The mystery of the Mystic Land But ' tove you and the clasp of your
 Meath the Autumn Moon!