Evening star., 1907-08-24
SUMMER RESORT KIDS


car of his seat-mate.
Yep" replied the tanned man with the
boxed jaws. Had the handache and had
to come home
The handache?'
THE handache." repeated the box-ja wed
man. THE inner side of my right hand
ached so terrificaily and hollered 50 unceas-
ingly for permission to apply itself to the
do he-most-good portions Of the anatomies
of about ninety young ones that made life
q burden for the grown folks at the sea-
shore hotel where 1 stopped that-well..
had to come home. that's all. to duck the
risk of going to jail"
Mice children at that hotel where you
stopped, eh?'
oh just average American children"
coolly replied the box-jawed man.
United States children on their travels.
Patriotic Of me to put it that way. isn't 1t?
Uh-huh. But I'm standing by 1t. 1t goes
as it lays. I can still hooray for the o.d
flag ard become gUrgly around the neck
band when l hear the Marine Band play
The Star Spangied Banner. but all the
and asseverate that. taking them by small
and large. the American children that you
meet UP with at American summer re-
sort are the worst behaved young 'uns on
the face of the civilized or unciviiized
globe. and If that's treason you can make
the most Of II.
lid sou ever notice how English chill
dren-and I don't like England or the Eng
lish. under stand--did you ever notice how
English children behave? No? Wei. you
ought to notice it. They behave. They
mind They've pretty manners. They're
o5edient. They're not priggish or undi:y
solemn. but they just behave themselves
They've got some respect for their par
ents and guardians There couldn't he any
thing nicer anywhere than little EnSE sh
boz or girl That's got to be gwen to the
English. They know how to fetch up young
ores
TIE same goes for TIE children of Europe
in general. French children are charming
sweet hammered ana ariable while not
sissyfcd. tractable. SIeeful. but not noisy;
always obadient. Spanish chi DIR IN fhe same.
Ditto German children. Similarly the chill
dren of the better classes of Italy. And
right on down the line.
But the better the class OF touring Amer
leans the worse the behavior Of tn air chill
dren | can't see how l can be wrong as
to this for I've been observing 1t for years
and my opinion is corroborated by the opin-
, ions of many observant and fair men with
whom I've convers I'd upon the subject
''There's an answer of course. And one
of the simplest answers imaginable. It's
not the youngsters fault that's the an
: swer. They're not corrected. Ihey re not
made to mind. They're brought up accord
ing to the milk-and- -watery dicta of that
lung -to-lung- talks school. the main tenet
of which is that it's crime to
punish misbehaving child. That's
what's called the precept and ex-
to be staked to a series of conversations
for the purpose Of appealing to his reason
and intellect and inducing him to see the
error of his ways purely philosophical
grounds. The tyke is to be shown by means
of elegantly expressed discourse on the part
Of his elders. that 1t is for his own best In
terest and for the interest Of society in
general not to-say for the resulting advan-
fon nf
himself with circumspection and decorum.
And all like that. A whole lot-'ot like
that. But no profaning Or punitive hand Is
ever to be laid on the bawiing and be.lering
and defiant young 'un that prefers to let
the discourse thing run for Finnegan and
the end book. Nix as to that: If the kid
doesn't heed your lectures on the subject Of
the utilitarian philosophy, why. just lee
ture him smore. that's, all. but never apply
the corrective mitt to any portion of his
person. That. according to the buzzom to-
buzzon talks in the weeklies that circulate
billion or two in the middle western land
of parior organs and sich like. would be a
crime.
There were. as l say about ninety of
them IN the hotel where 1 stayed at .the
beach. This was nice hotel barring the
children OF the superior families. and it
charged nice rates-rates that ought to've
been considered high enough to insure at
least a little protection for the grown-ups
from the youngsters" The kids all belonged
TO "nat we Sel iItO lile udDit VI
nice families because they're there with
bank-rolls. But the whole ninety OF them
l didn't notice an exception-were just
brats; bowling. bawiing. defiant. shrieking.
kicking. screaming. unreguated. unguided,
| ramping. roaring brats The little girls just
as bratty the little boys; all brats. If
you consider that an exaggerated statement
| I'll make you a gamble on it, and pay your
| fare down to that hotel and back so that
you can see for yourself. and I'll take my
| chance. knowing you to be fair man. on
| your coming back and telling me that you
yourself with all of your unruff1ed amiaSi-
| ty of disposition. found them to be intol-
cradle brats.
"One morning dear little girl of FIVE,
with a big pink sash around her waist.
stood on the stairs of the hotel holding her
| outstretched fingers at her nose for my
! benefit was sitting in the hotel exchange
reading a paper. She had the fingers of
both hands outstretched. one thumb at her
nose. and she was wisgling them at me
| just the cutest you ever saw. l went on
| reading. Presently the mother Of that little
| dear came along and caught sight of the
blessed little fairy doing that thumb-at-
nose thing What did the mother do? Why,
she stood there. perfectly rapt over the
cunnin'nes Of IT! That's what!
"The youngsters at the hotel were sup
posed to play downstairs in fine big base
ment playroom provided for them. but
would they play there? Not sos you could
observe it-and the hotel folks. after the
coin. couldn't and wouldn't enforce the
rule SO the little pinafored dearS spent all
| of the daylight and some of the night hours
rearing and tearing through the exchange
and reception and ball and receiving rooms.
deliberately kicking over the expensive
chairs and tete-a-tetes and things when
they couldn't find anything else to do.
They'd stink up behind some old lady try
ing to read a newspaper or book and slam
a lot of sofa pillows into her face. knocking
her spectacles off and soaring her almost
to death. and their mothers would say re-
provingly. Now. dawling,' and let Ii 60
at that. They'd bang together on the piano
keys with all the might Of their fists. and
their mothers would say Dawling-just like
that.
They'd pound in herds Of score or SO
around the main porch, beating their shoes
and sandals on the re-echoing wood with
all their might and deliberately kicking
against the rockers of the resting grown
ups, and their mothers would say 'Dawling
to them They'd deliberately dump the
ink out of the wells onto the tables in the
writing rooms. and jes' laff and laff and
clap their little hands. 50 gleeful. when
their mammas said Dawling' to them.
They'd stink up to the hotel newsstand
and knock ali OF the books and magazines
and papers over and shrek with joy when
their mammas said "Dawling" to them
They.d come UP from the beach with double
I'D md n