Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-12-15
CLOCKS OF DISTRICT
HAVE MANY MOODS

TT has been suggested that this city
have an official clock that shall al
/ ways be right, continually in motion
and so placed as to be visible at long
distance
Having found that his watch was Off
some two minutes according to the mean
noon decided upon by the learned as
tronomers at the observatory on that
particular day. a citizen of this mans
town decided to make a tour of the town
clocks. The city is becoming richly
| endowed with clocks for the informa-
ton of the passer-by. These clocks,
If they are to be decent and well-behaved,
must be accurate. Are they? The
patient investigator arose one morning
obeying the home clocks seven strokes,
delivered on a spiral spring with Calling
considered. Their innate cussedness
their disposition to get tired and lay
| off a week, to say nothing of a playful
spirit which leads them to begin to strike
and then decide to keep it up, put them
| in a class by themselves. After papa
has set it an hour ahead to run home the
daughters late slayer and said daugh-
ter has set it back afterward an hour
and half to fool papa, its usefulness
as a timepece is strangled
watch time. Arriving at 9th and New
York avenue he discovered that the clock
upon a well-known stores tower pro-
claimed the hour of $40. He had thus
gained ten minutes time on his way.
When he got to 9th and Pennsylvania
avenue he glanced at the post office
clock. To his surprise it was S:30-the
time he left home, watch time. the solar.
sdereal, mean noon or whatever 1t Is,
time Coming up the avenue he spied
-fa III Of
in it's majesty blithely insisting that 1885
was the only Simon-pure, unadulterated
measurement of the time that had elapsed
since the last midnight. Something was
radically wrong with the clocks he had
met on his way. They seemed plent-
fully supplied with initiative, but had
no power of agreeableness each to the
other. Going farther up the avenue the
clock upon the Southern railway Office
insinuated from it's height that $40 was
the correct chronological determination.
Since it was now exactly S:5v by his
watch the investigating person was at
sea. If the mean noon was right the
day before then his watch was right.
So far however, no clock had agreeu
with his pocket piece. Thinking perhaps
to find one at least he turned the corner
of 14th an. F and sought the clock in
the vicinity Of the Corcoran building.
There was an expression almost OF apol-
ogy upon the face of this clock, as the
hands indicated o'clock. Whether some
one forgot the winding day or whether
the clock, unable to practice it's hypoc-
risy any longer, simply gave up in shame,
the fact remained that this timepiece
had ceased to struggle.
While puzzling over the inactivity Of
this old clock the clock on the American
blows upon it's mellow bell. AS his
watch now declared in favor Of S:55 here
was still another discrepancy. AS he
went down G street he noted at 18th
that the hands of the post Office clock
| were sailing around as though bewitched.
| Evidently some one was setting it. Sud-
denly the chase around the dial ended
and the hands paused at 1855. 1t was
then o'clock, watch time. CHANGING up
at the clock at the corner Of 18th and G
the investigator recoiled in surprise. The
| clock was gone an only the frame
remained. Inquiry ELECTED the informa-
ton that the timepiece had been behav-
ing badly and was laid up for repairs.
Down to 7th street he went In front of
a jewelers. massive clock indicated
9 o'clock. Watch time. sos. which was
concurred in by chronometer in the
| window.
The clocks all varied from his watch
| from a few minutes to five and ten our
ing the day. One clock was found to
have habit of holding one hand an the
other until an hour had passed. This
absent-minded habit created much dis
trust. Another clock seemed possessed
L
| ished, it had penchant for suddenly
whooping things up. Its works would
| start into feverish activity and the in
junction backward, turn backward, oh,
| time, in thy flight" was literally obeyed
The hands would turn backward hour
| after hour as they galloped madly in
| the direction no self-respecting clock
shoul4 go; Still another clock carried
out the idea OIL the poet Of time with
leaden feet This clock wasn't in a
| hurry and did not seem disposed to obey
the rules of denoting time. The interval
| between minutes seemed interminable,
and when the long hand once made up its
| mind to indicate another minute it jump
ed forward with startling abruptness.
The post once clock was found to be
| undecided about it's mission in life 1t
| seemed upon close scrutiny to be divided
between stopping forever systematically
denoting time whenever good and ready
| or simply acting as a lighthouse at night
| to indicate the location of the post office
to weary travellers lost on their Way
| from the Union station.
Solomon says: "Of the making Of books
| there Is no end" He would say it of
clocks today. Just why they cannot be
| taught to behave themselves, tell the
| truth and be instructed in the proper use of
| their hands before being sent out into the
world Is mystery.
The same uncomplimentary. not to say
| insulting. things are SAID before the
! faces of these clocks as behind their
| backs. Yet some clocks most public
| clocks, are frivolous. lacking in dignity
| and subject to moods.
| So the patient Investigator will here
after stick to the mean noon Of the
observatory's brilliant astronomers and
| avert his head or make a detour Of town