The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1907-07-06

UG Ou Ills UcSb DCudvlOl uC Sdu al
ways sit around his own house in full
dress; he can't make daily use of the
stilted ceremonies of polite society in
his home life. There you are wrong
and here you are right. If there is
any place on earth that a man should
be on his best behavior, it is at home,
but 1 do not mean by that that he
should put In practice all the purely
artificial forms of social etiquette.
Heaven forbid No one detests
meaningless ceremony more than do.
But the courtesies that spring from
the heart, that are the outward man
ifestations of a desire to please or to
be of service to its object, are entirely
different. To the true gentleman
they are as natural as the circulation
of his blood. He can no more dis
pense with them than he can with
his breath. 1t is pity that so few
of us are true gentlemen. Most ofus
are selfish to the bone, and genuine
courtesy is an evidence of forgetftl-
ness of self, virtue which we have
to cultivate. If it is worth while to
be a gentleman at all-and I never
heard anybody express any doubts on
that point-it is certainly worth while
to be a gentleman at home. The
good opinion of your wife is of more
importance to you than the opinions
of all the rest of the people of the
world put together. Yet you would
fail to show to her courtesy which
you would bestow upon another as
matter of course and feel ashamed if
you were remiss in the least particu.
lar.
No, you can't do a better thing
than to treat your wife at least as
we'll as you do your neighbor's.
She will appreciate it. can say that
with emphasis, for nothing hurts a
woman more than the apparent loss of
that fine consideration which distin-
guish the wooing days. No matter
| If she does feel sure of your love, no
matter If you prove your affection in
numberless other ways, she who has
reigned as queen is never fully satis-
fed with less than the honors due to
ROYALTY. And il is so easy to crafty
her. It is only necessary to keep in
mind all the time that your wife is a
woman and that good breeding works
dress suit.
1 have a strong recollection Of a
blacksmith who lived in the little
village where went to school when
a boy. He was a great, brawny,
rough-looking fellow, whose face and
hands were grimmed by smoke of the
forge. He seldom wore a coat and
never collar except on Sunday, but
he was one Of the truest gentlemen !
have ever known, and his wife was
envied by every other woman IA the
village simply because of his Difference
to her in private as we'll as in pub
lie. He was rustic Bayard, but his
chivalry was as pure and true as that
of any broadcloth attired city man.
No, my son, genuine courtesy is not
a matter of dress or of ceremony, and
| in practicing at home you don't have
to sacrifice your own comfort to an
| extent worthy of consideration. On
the other hand, it pays wonderfully
| in the pleasure it gives to your wife
and, by reflection, to you. 1t pays in
the grace it gives to your own char
acter and, better than all else, it
pays in its influence upon the charac-
ter of your immediate family. Some
of these days, unless you are differ
ent from the majority of mankind,
YOU will be father. Your children
will be very much as you make them,
and your actions will have more to do
with the making than your commands.
They will, consciously or unconscious
| ly, copy your faults as well as your
virtues, and the courtesy you display
in their presence will, in some part at
least, become fixed habits with them.
Your own training has been such that
| I do not fear you will go far wrong
in this particular, but notwithstand-
| ing this have seen evidence that you
are not holding uf to the old mans
standard, and want you to be right
all right.
Now, John, don't misunderstood
me. I don't want you to be a jump
/ ing Jack in the box at home or any
where else. Extremes are always obi
Gus, and politeness may be so over.
done that it becomes pain instead
of a pleasure to its object. Men like
old Perkins simply make themselve:
ridiculous. True politeness is nevel
obtrusive. The test oe we'll dress
ed man is your inability to remem
Der what he wore. If he inclined t
foppishness, the conspicuousness o.
his attire will arrest your attention
as we'll as your condemnation. Or
} the other hand, the absence of any
part of the correct costume or any ex
hibition of untidiness or carelessnes:
: in the wearing Is always conspicuous
So with politeness. 1t is greatly
missed when absent. 1t should bt
uuuOLlCcdDlG WltSu ~ - PASoSAe
That is the brand to use in the home
, as well as outside of it. If you take
it off when you hang your hat up II
! the hall, you can bet your sweet life
; that Anna May will miss it, and the
missing will hurt.
) Don't greet her with a grunt, but
with a kiss. I wouldn't advise yot
. to apply that form of courtesy tc
, others, but in the home the customary
forms may be modified, or, rather
: magnifed, for love and not custom
dictates there. Don't take the bes1
chair In the room unless she com
t mands it. She probably will insis
: on preserving the most comfortable
, rocker for you, but you should nevel
: get into the habit of taking things
, for granted. Show her that yot