davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
How RiIer learned 10 swim.

One of the best evidences that q man
lives as ne thinks is furnished by James
White0mb Riley, who rather gl0ries in
the title his admirers have bestowed on
him-"The Ho0sler Poet" Mr.. Riley is
getting well along iH years now-he was
born In l,53-but the "boy-heart." Of
which be- has written so much. still ahI5es
with him. on spring days such as this
ha loves 90 sally forth from his quiet re-
treat in L0ckorbie street. Indianapolis
and travel by trolley back 20 bis old home
town. Greenfield. only about thirty miles
away Here he is plain jim 20 every
one he meets, and, Ignoring the prosper
Gus. he finds his delights in loafng at
the blacksmith shop or az the corner
drug store. where he can swap yarns
with the best u the oldumers. Or. TAX
ing q buggy. he viii drive out 20 "Th' old
swimmiu hole" which he has immOr-
t7Uzed in verse, and, sitting on a log he
Will, If his companion be silent and not
too curious. recall the strange reminis-
Ceuces OF his bovhOod when as a tow
headed y0ungster he used 20 travel across
the nearby fields. barefooted, for the
iuXgEy Of a swim. Il was a little hard
for him to learn TO swim, and one DAY
% his great relief an i,inerant gravely
informed him that the only infallibie
remedy was earthworm OIL This If rub
bed on the body. would enable boys 10
keep af0at an indefinite period Of time.
he was told. OF course. the boy Riley
dug earthw0rms assiduously. and placed
them IN a wide-mouthed bottle. This was
put I'm the hot sun. as the itinerant had
said that they would turn into oil in a
few days They did. and the resultant
oil was so odoruus when the bottle was
Eucorked that all the rest OF the boys
fled i'm dismay. But Riley wanted 20
swim. and so ne anOinted himself reli-
gi0usly Alas, the charm did not work.
nor did the water of the Brandywine
wash away the effluvia. The result was
that when Riley went home he was
scrubbed and licked and licked and scrub
bed all with such small effect that for
the family peace he WAS obliged to sleep
/ IN an clubhouse until the odOr had worn
off. This IS one Of the episodes that Mr..
Riley probably will leave out when he
writes his autobiography.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
Reduced sleeper Rates.

Railway traffic officials and public men
interested in rate legislation are dis
cUssil,; the action Of a Texas railroad
in voluntarily reducing charges for sleep
ing-car berths The road I'm question is
the Texas Central, comparatively short
line. It has notified the State railroad
cOmmi. sion that after July l it will
operate its own sleeping cars. and has
made application for authority to put
into effect a rate Of $50 for lower. and
81 for upper berths between Waco and
Rotan, a distance Of 20S miles. The COM
mission recently made a general order re-
ducing sleeper rates. but the big railroads
Joined the Pullman company in enjoining
the enforcement of the new tariffs, which
were about the same as those now volun-
tarily adopted by the Texas Central
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
Microbes and Kisses,

Between the learned physician who ad'
vised, Avoid all kissing as you would thc
plague" and the other who declared that
there is no danger at all in kissing.
there should be. it will occur to the or
dinary layman, some happy middle
ground upon which mankind may stand
and face the ancient and honorable kiss
with entire composure, unruffled, undis-
mayed, and unafraid.
The recent convention of physicians al
Atlantic City brought out much infor-
nation Of undoubted benefit TO the people
Theories were advanced along pathologi
cal and physiological lines that Will not
weigh lightly in the future progress OF
materia medica, II Is 70 be regretted
that so important a subject as sanitary
and safe osculation-manifesUy it would
have been absurd 10 seek to regulate OF
even defire the sane yariety-was left in
so unsatisfactory a state.
Esculapius-a gentleman Of mythology.
cal ancestry. and perhaps. for this rea-
son alone, admitted by all physicians tC
have been the father OF the cult-dsturb-
ed not the sweet serenity Of his days with
thoughts Of germs, baciIu, or other micro
scopic varmints Of hostile and maliciou.
persuasion. He imprinted chaste salutes
upon the lips Of Mrs. Esculapius whene'eI
the spirit moved him, and exc upon the
lips Of the lesser Esculapiuses EsculapH
or Esculapiusets, whatever it was the
fashion 90 call them IN those olden times
To EsCuapius. whom Homer most justly
called "the blameless physician a kiss
was what it should be- In his time. Aph-
rodites idea Of kissing was held in high
esteem. and she said
Give me a kiss and 20 that kiss score,
Then 90 that twenty add an hundred more
A thousand 10 that hundred So kiss on.
To make that thousand up a million.
Treble that million. and when that IS done
Let's kiss afresh. as when ve first begun"
And ali Of this time. bear in mind. wher
kisses were piling up into millions. only
TO begin all over again, not a germ. not
microbe, not a single lurking baciI
hove in sight. or I'm any wise gave pause
20 the felicities OF the performance.
ltANtlfScs Afh Nl iilt4t-Nr LtHLi Il ny EieAlLl
standpoint. this was reckless. and ovrI
and beyond the bounds Of such reason as
may be attributed I'm general 20 voluu-
tary osculation. II is : far cry from Es-
cuiapius 90 the i0doform-Scented life
pTeserver Of this hour and time. and the
mere fact that the pendulum has swung
so far I'm the other direction Will not of
itself warrant an abandoned return "a
the merry ways and cheerful days Of Es-
culapus. and the free and unlimited
coinage Of kisses. without the consent
Of any other nation, man. woman. OF
child on earth. save and except those per.
s01aIIv concerned.
a modern scientist has said that tears
are model germicides. Therefore lets
have
Tears f1l tomorrow.
B-t kisses to-day"
Let the germs accumulated I'm our voutf
be destroyed by the tears Of after years
The one we may have; the other we
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

this. The lessons the stage teaches are
all the more powerful because they are
indirect; the congregation is an enormous
one. and is steadily increasing. The OBJ
ject of the College Theater is to present
only the best in dramatic art, and. Of
course, no plays VIII be produced o.
which the trustees of St Vincents Coli
lege do not approve. Here viii be pro-
duced artistic and refined entertainment
and it is 20 be hoped that the theater
will be an invaluable aid to the work Of
the college.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
The Sbrewd Mr.. Penrose.

The latest story about the recent Penn
sylvania Republican State convention
confirms the predictions of those who.
for some time before the meeting was
held. persisted in declaring that Senator
PenrOse would control When John O.
Sheath was nominated for State treasurer
the statement was made that the senior
Senator had been worsted inasmuch as
Sheath was not his first choice II now
appears. according to the Philadelphia
Public Ledger. that Penrose favored the
nomination Of Sheath all along. but re-
Trained from coming out in the open
because he feared his active support
might incur the displeasure Of some Of
the more pronounced anti-machine dele
gates, and especially those from the
country districts. The Senator. it is said
was unusually secretive about the matter
and even some of his closest friends
did not know that he desired the nomi-
nation of Sheath until after the balloting
was over,
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
A LITTLE NONSENSE.
ONLY sHAMMING.

The man was cold and stern;
The maid was cute.
II made us fairly burn
To see the brute
Neglect that grille fair,
That slender slip.
And from the window stare
Throughout the trip,
Although she was as shy
As is a bird.
He let the time drag by
Without a word
We ionged 10 kick the dolt,
And but for her
He might have had a jolt,
1 do aver.
But we. # seems. were wrong.
And of the scent
They reached their town ere long,
and as they went
They left from seat to door,
To be precise,
Upon the Pullman floor
A trail Of rice.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
ARE YOU GOING AWAY?

Subscribers who leave the city tempo
FsriIy should nave The Washington Herald
mailed 20 them. Addresses VII be changed
Is often as requested. You cannot keep
fully informed about affairs in Washington
unless your paper follows you.
Before leaving. mail OF telephone your
address 10 this Office.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
1 ,Endest Hint 10 Knnx.

From the Punzsutawuey Spirit.
Senator Knox is real candidate now.
Anyhow. the cartoonists are after him.
This reminds us that the Spirit was the
original Knox boomer. We do not say
this to curry favor with the next admin
istration. but trust that Mr.. Knox vii,
not forget it when he is elected President
and begins an impartial search for good
Cabinet material
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
Not a Fittins Abode.

From the BROOKLYN Eagle.
Joaquin Miller says jocularly that his
mining ventures have been so successful
that he has concluded to enter politics
He picks oregon, and wants to be
United States Senator. Pegasus stabbed IN
the Senate chamber would be In box
stall.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
sidesteppins a Controversy.

From the Charlotte Observer.
Though apparently inclined to favor
Hon Hoke Smith and Hon. Col JOAN
Temple Graves. Georgia has never sue
ceeded in determining who are her most
conspicuous living sons. OF course. South
Caroli1a's are Senator Tillman and Squire
Bales. As 20 North Car0ina's and Yir-
ginia's. we are silent. not wishing 10 get
mixed up in a fresh wrangle on the sub
iect of poetry
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
DR.. Shnw,s Achievement

From the indianapolis News.
Nor is it an insignificant achievement
for DR.. Albert Shaw TO emerge from It
without becoming one OF the Ananias
guild, an undesirable citizen. or even a
nature faker
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
The worlds Desire.

Take alI my joys and my pleasures
away; put all my blessings 10 rout Rob
me Of an, but do leave me, l pray, some
thing 10 worry about
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
sure winner.

what is the plot Of your new drama o."
ct has none
"But how can it succeedTT
Hush New idea We're going to let
the audience guess on the plot az 80 cents
a throw. They can't win. Can YOU beat
it2"
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
Historical Rnmnnce-

'Tve improved my novel"
"So?"
Yes. In the new edition I make two
blades leap from the scabbard where only
one spTang before"
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

No sooner does the Houston Post con.
clude a series Of brilliant if utterly in.
sincere, editorials on water than the At
ianta Georgian unwinds a. most impossi
hle rattlesnake yarn The time for the
Georgian TO climb on the sprinkler beside
the Post would appear 90 Doe az hand
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
ninInnlnrv.

only three fingers, John. III measure
it,"
But three Of your dainty fingers
wouldn't make a. toothful."
This got him six fingers.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

A correspondent in the New York
World describes a Republican as zone
who never fired on the United States
flag" and denies that there is any other
correct definition. Unless the gentleman
desires To throw doubt upon his own Re
publican qualifications, he should sternly
suppress his bray.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

Mr.. Theodore Roosevelt speaks twice at
the jamestown Exposition tomorrow.
while Mr. John Temple Graves speaks
once Thus is the balance Of importance
finely adjusted 10 the necessities Of the
occasion
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
Shnnied

Spring 20 smile a bit doth deign,
on the side.
Even spring could not chuck rain
At a bride
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
Too wealthy.

From the New York Mail
Mr.. John Temple Graves assertion that
a paragrapher can't enter heaven is not
founded. we believe. on Matthew. xix.24.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
From the New York Nail.

Evasion or silence betrays the embar-
rassment Of the newspaper committed to
the recount bill as its full significance is
disclosed. and there is a steadily rising
sentiment Of indignation at the wrong it
proposes to do the city, and the grotesque
travesty Of republican institutions It en-
bodies
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
BY All Means.

From the Indianapolis Sun
# government ownership IS a good
thing by all means turn the weather
over 10 an administration which can diff
ferentiate between June takers and true
reformers.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
Now Ntnnt

What a CUt-u1 he is. isn't he7"
In what w8y2'
He works in q butcher shop"
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
EXPLAINED.

''They want a change Of venue"
What is that?"
Something demanded by those who
say they can't get justice under a certain
jurisdiction, but who are afraid they
can"
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
Quite SO.

a thin man in hard luck looks plaintiv
but a fat man merely looks greasy.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
Pinnacle of Popular.

rs Tompkin's wife POPULAR"
VERY. She can create more jealousy
and make more enemies than any woman
In town
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

Summer officially begins on June @, "
says the Richmond Times-Dispatch. And
yet. the indications % date are that il
will be 3 for summer this year.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

Beyond the Alps lies Italy" If you
don't believe it, we are prepared to prove
it by 15i,S57 commencement orators.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
THE RECOUNT BILL.
New York City Press OutSPoken
Against Measure,
From the Brooklyn Eagle.

From the Brooklyn Eagle
The measure. if passed will probably
be tested for constitutonallty. and that
may use mp all the time of the mayoral
term. Such q result should please Mr..
Hearst. Apparently he would rather have
his grievance for agitation than the set
tlement Of il in law or by recount under
conditions nearly certain TO show that
the mayor was elected
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
From the New Y1-k TIns..

A-.'l4 llE WV A-Ia lill'-
This proceeding tunder the recount bilD
introduces baleful confusion into our pO-
litical contests. and establishes a prece-
dent that will encourage defeated candi-
dates 10 keep the courts on the jump and
the community in an uprOar. provided
only they have the means to keep up the
contest and are reckless enough TO make
IL
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

The melancholy days are come,
The saddest q the year.
Spriug gentle spring Is on the bum
Og It would sure be here,
- 5, W., in New York sun.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

According to the Charleston News and
Courier. they are enjoying '1ionears" po-
tatoes in that city. We presume we are
supposed to believe that South Carolina
potatoes not only have eyes to see. but
ears to hear as well
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

1T will be all right, If the cold weather
does not affect the mint crop" saws the
Baltimore American. The inspiration Of
the Americans wonderful optimism IS out
al last
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

Wages are steadily advancing" says
a contemporary. Except the wages Of
sin. that remains fixed and steadfast.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
Snh.crintinn Rae, kv Mil.

No attention tciH be paid to anonymous
contributions, and no communications 10
the editor iUiH be printed orcept oUer the
name Of the aUritsr.
Manuscripts offered for publication ioiH
be returned IF unavailable, but stamps
should be sent iCitH the manuscript for
that purpose.
Al communications intended for this
newspaper. lCHetber for the daily or the
SUNDAY issue, should be addressed TO
THE WASHINGTON HERALD
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

The wettest place on earth is Cherra-
punji Ida, The Sunday lid is probably
unknown ln that locality.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

why tampsr with prevailing STYLES in
hats? The present mode is very swell.
saws a fashion magazine. In other words:
stand pat, and let swell enough alone.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
From th. Now Yolk Glohs.

LII Wv TTII-E-
Mayor McClellan's appeal to the legis-
lature concerning the so-called recount
bill is a manly and straightforward pro-
test against injustice. The bill as it
reads is indefensible-bad as it is in prin-
ciple. it is worse I'm detail
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

Perhaps Senator Platt insists that he
made President Roosevelt because he
realizes that his chief hope Of fame in the
future lies in his possible ability to make
people believe it.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

why will Senator Dick not TALK" asks
an overinquisitive contemporary. Don't
know sun spots, probably.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

New YORK Office. Nassau Beekmsn Bldg. LsCoste a
Maxwell Managers
Chicago Ofcs. Marquette Bldg, LaCosts & Max
well Managers
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

The opinion advanced by a friend Of
the President to the effect that third
term might not be thrust aside by that
gentleman in the event Of a war doubtless
will result in peremptory order from
Senator Foraker 10 end the Brownsville
scran Immediately. II not sooner.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

Of japanese who refuse 10 surrender their
allegiance TO Japan, ana who, reaping
many Of the benefits of Mexican ciyili-
cation, claim exemption from some Of
its penalties. It would seem that this
matter Of the reconciliation Of domicile
with nationality is a ft and proper
question for international discussion, and
IL might very well and profitably be
thrashed out at The Hague Conference.
Mr. Bryan rigidly adheres 10 his anti
third-term ideas, but sees no especially
weighty arguments against a third nomi-
naIlnn
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

The Chicago Post discusses editorially
"The Pie Belt If it is the championship
belt Of which the Post speaks, the Bentz-
town Bard of the Baltimore Sun has il
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
From the New York Tnbune.

In our deliberate judgment the measure
(the recount bilD would supDant a better
remedy for any wrong which may have
been done. and its adoption would threat
en- a long succession of evils.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

Wouldn't it he nice If the Thaw trial
could be quietly and finally disposed Of
while the eyes Of the country are fixed
upon Boise City?
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

The only thing upon which the news
papers appear able % agree concerning
Marse Henry's dark horse is that It isn't
Booker Washington.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

It IS said that the cars on the proposed
monorailway will be so narrow that only
one passenger can occupy a seat This
will somewhat reconcile bridal tourists to
the circumstance that there will be no
tunnels along the way.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

Mr. Roosevelt says a soiled hand looks
as good TO him as any other. This may
encourage Mr.. Hartman TO call at the
White House Just once more. for luck.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
Frnm The New Ynrk World.

Does Mr. Hearst want an honest and
complete recount Of the votes in the last
city election? If so, why does he not
publicly pledge himself TO apply for a re
count in every election district?
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

a scientist declares that the moon is
simply a piece of the earth. detached sew
eral million years ago. This news will
render il impossible for Mr. John d.
Rockefeller TO die perfectly happy.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

"Enters the Boo sisters; Peeka and
Carl says the New York Mail. II is well
TO know hoo is hoo among the BOos
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

The McAlester Und t. Daily Capital
says that "Jncle joe is merely "a by
stander' in the Ohio war. Not of the
innocent variety. however.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

Then We may be able 20 improve our
knowledge and to live such lives as 70
entitle us 10 the favor Of Him who is the
God Of the living and of the disembodied
spirits
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09
Tears f1l tomorrow.
BIT kisses to-day

Let the germs accumulated in our youth
be destroyed by the tears Of after years.
The one We may have; the other we
must and viii have
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

Mention OF Secretary Taft's name in
connection with the Presidency ev0kss
enthusiasm among Republicans OF the
Pacific SLOPE, said Col Melville NJ.
Gillette, a leading citizen of Newark.
Ohio. az the New Willard
''I was recently on the Coast. and from
Seattle to San Diego I heard not ing but
eul0gium Of Taft The people Of that Sec
ton are satisfied that nothing can induce
Col Roosevelt 90 run again. and they
look upon the Secretary Of War as his
natural successor
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

Mr. Harvey Fleming. editor Of the KAN
sas City Journal. is at the SEoreham. It
is his first visit 70 Washington in a long
time. He was formerly here as a news
paper correspondent. and was highly pop
ulsr in the fraternity.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-09

Pythagoras popular account Of earthquakes was
that they were occa stoned by synod OF ghosts as
sembled under ground.-WaTburt0n.
The sun., 1907-08-22
co on MAKING TIN SOLDIERS.
German Toy Manufacturers Refuse to
Beckon the Prince Of Peace.

PITrsBURG, Aug. 2l.-Rabbi j. Leonard
Levy Of Pittsburg. a delegate TO the recent
New York peace conference and visitor al
the Hague conference. has returned from
a ten weeks visit to Europe. where he spent
much time trying to get the makers Of toys
to cease building playthings on wsrlike
models on the ground that playing with
such toys as soldiers guns, &c., creates
wsrlike thoughts in the breasts Of the chill
dren.
His mission was failure The rabbi
tonight said:
The manufacture Of toys in Germany,
particularly in Nuremburg. is purely a COM
mercial proposition and they will make
toys for which they ind the best market
irrespective OF other conditions.
NO help to the peace propaganda can he
expected from that source now. as COM
mercial benefits are considered by far more
important.
"Peace through the adjustment of war
like toys is an admirable theory and one
which can be worked out eventually but
only with the assistance OF the Americans
What is now needed is that some Ameri-
can invent a lot Of peace toys. have them
made in Germany and allow them 70 be ex-
plotted in this country. Only in this way
can We get universal recognition Of any
peace tow"
The sun., 1907-08-22
WOODFORD VERSUS WALkER.
4 Case That Embarrssscs Judge md May
Never Come 10 Trial.

SARATOGA. N. Y. Aug. 2l.-Tom Wood
ford. who attacked J. Brandt Walker at
James Reilly's last night, wes arrested
this morning in his rooms at the United
States Hotel. Walker accused Woodford
Of attacking him. and the trial was set for
this evening at the Town Hall. The elite
OF the gambling and speculative fraternity
was on hand and embarrassed the Judge.
Mr. Walker said that he would never,
never forgive Mr. woodford for the attack
upon his person. and MIR. Woodford said
that under the circumstances he would
rather go TO jail than apologize 10 Mr..
Walker.
Senator Tom Grady and number Of other
legal lights. including in the background
the Hon. Timothy p. Sullivan. were on
hand to say a word for Mr.. Woodford.
Mr. Walker was represented by the best
talent of Saratoga, including Proctor Smith.
assistant superintendent OF the Saratoga
Sunday School Association.
The fret case called was that Of a home
less drunk Tie admitted the charge and
was fined IS or ten days. The friends Of
Woodford. led by Verney Barton. put up
the fine. This further dieconcerted the
Judge, and when the case Of Walker against
Woodfcrd was called he announced that
he would postpone it until morning
Outside the court room the crowd was
evidently for Woodford as against Walker.
and ID looked as though there would be
demonstration, but Mr.. Walker, followed
by boots and Kisses. took rig and drove
downtown
The consensus is that the case will never
come TO trial.