New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1907-05-12
STERILIZED AFFECTION.

1t has long been supposed that low temper
atures effeCtually prevent all manners of decay
and deterioration. But the latest test made in
Boston proves cOnclusively that some things
are not kept fresh by cold storage, Ex-senator
Kinds, Of Mississippi, has been conducting
periments in the great American cold storage
warehouse which show the startling fact that
even the great intellectual frigdity OF Boston
does not prevent the decay of the most carefully
sterlized Bostonian negro sentiment. Mr.. Kinds
has been unable to rent either a house or an
apartment in or about Boston. Dozens of agents
either refused or trpled their rentals to discOur-
age the Mississippi negro much to Mr.. Hindss
surprise. For who would have supposed that
BOstons classic love for oppressed races in the
South. the Philippines and everywhere else
could have gone bad?
At the usual BostOnian temperature love will
always be cold, OF course. but that II should turn
to hatred is a sorrowful discovery The newly
discovered anti-negrO prejudice throws light
upon the probable character of that exquisite
love for head hunting Dyaks and Pulaj jane
skull collectors long freely lavished at long range
by Bostonlan anti-imperiallsts and friends who
had caught their chill Unlike ordinary food.
this wonderful love for the lowIy keeps best In
warm climates and hence is manufactured in
BOSTON for export only. In Mississippi and Min
danao the natives partake of it freely and with
i'ii'H i4''iS ShHpVNNihS lhdl' II tApOstu ~ Tue
Absolute Zero Of Omniscient Boston, 1t would
turn sour as fast pasteurized milk in August.
The benighted inferior races do not understand
the causes of this paradOxiCal transformation OF
affection. for they are ignorant OF the effects OF
pasteurZing the milk OF human kindness This
famous fluid like the bovine type, normally con-
tains two kinds of bacteria. the harmful and the
harmless. The harmful ones, though differing
widely among themselves. nearly all belong To
the same genus. that Of bacillus iOgicG ab-
| strGctR. Their effect Is, curouslv enough more
violent upon the purveyor of the milk than upon
the drinker the former victim develops maud
lin sympathy for savages and an uncomfortable
impulse 10 treat the latter as Bostonians The
savage recipient. not realizing this insult gets
queer notions about the white man and his
| brain sickness The good bacilii In the milk are
| providentially placed there TO counterfeit the ef
| fects OF the bad ones; known as baciH srnsus
con'nunfs. they keep clear the heads OF pur-
veyOr and drinker alike. Unhapply though
the Bostonlans sterlize this milk by exposing
1t to the low temperature OF an intellectual
vacuum this process kills some OF the bad ha
cilli, 10 he sure, but also lays low all the good
ones. II Mr.. Kinds and other aggrieved victims
understand this somewhat technical explanation
they will know why the milk of human kindness
| turns sour so suddenly at the North Pole OF the
human race.
Needless to say. Boston milk for export Is
usually condensed and canned so that il NAV
| travel better and keep longer The fact that II
sours rapidly at the seat of manufacture will.
therefore not deter the pro-caunlbal milkmen
| from shipping canned sentiment and preserved
humanitarianism 10 the uttermost parts of the
earth there to rival in fame the wooden nutmegs
| or Connecticut. In spite OF Mr. Hinds's painful
| experience in Boston. the number Of pamphlets
| to the Fiipinos will probably suffer no dimInu-
! ton.