The Washington herald., 1907-03-10

supper at the house Of foreigner who has lived
IN Washington for many years, and has q minor
oincsl position under his government. EveFybody's
1 health at the table proposed. not once. but
several umes. and then there many specials
Vas told by my neighbor that was expected to
drink bumper with each health. OF course. that
would have been impossible and was forced 10
offend against the tradition.
Answer. No, this is not good form in
America-this toasting at table-except. of
course, at very formal dinners. when long
speeches are made. and it has practically
gone out in Europe. entirely gone out
among the smartest people there. A din
ner in the "UPpertendom" OF Berlin to-
day is not at all different from one in
New York or Washington, Paris or Lon
don Distances have been shortened by
the mechanical devices Of our times, ana
one custom prevails in a certain set all
the world over
s Question: What is a parrenue. hear certain
people IN Washington frequently turning I'd their
noses at what they term parTenuesi
Answer. The word "parvenue" comes
from the Latin pervenio, 10 arrive, and
signifies an upstart, one who has re-
]
be understood that all people who quickly
acquire riches are parvenues, for many
Of them accept their good fortune with
mOdesty and grace. while ths parvenue.
who has lately succeeded IN obtaining a
position in society, looks down on all
others who have not her social resources
pose that is simply amusing 70 all those
who really belong" in society. The chief
distinction OF the parvenue is that - or
she. not secure Of their position, seeks
10 discredit others about whose antece-
dents they are rot absolutely sure. Some
time ago. az the afternoon reception OF
one of these gentry. a very uainly
dressed lady called. She was unaccom-
panied but very gracious in her manner
70 her hostess. The hostess, on the con-
traTy, was almost rude in her greeting
aid paid no attention TO her guest while
she was in the room. On looking over her
cards. she discovered that il was the
wife OF the British Ambassador that she
had so sighted The fuIsomeness that
followed this first impertinence. however.
did not appease the aiubassadress. who
refused 20 forgive the rudeness offered.
and Nine. PaTvenue was never received
at the British Embassy. There is an old
adage that il takes three generations 10
make gentleman. so that the great
grandchildren OF the paryenues who are
an unpleasant element in the society Of
to-day may be acceptable some seventy
FIVE or a hundred years hence.
g. Question: Would u not be proper fcr ne 20
SO 20 the ball at Annapolis given by the midship-
men unchapeToncdf An old friend who Is in the
Academy, writes 70 from there that he viii
meet me az the station and take me o. a boarding
house kept by one Of the sustocrsts Of Annapolis
who viii chaperOn me at the hall and that this IS
perfectly proper and customary.
Answer. RegretfulIy, it is customary.
among a certain class, but il IS not proper
and very much to be deplored. There is
no excuse in the world for q young girl
going 10 Annapolis without a chaperou.
talk as much as YOU will about the
Chivalry Of American men and the indie
pendence of American women. If YOU
cannot find a Chaperou 20 go with YOU
or join some party, 1t is best 20 stay at
home. Some day the Academy authOri-
ties will take action on this much-to-be
criticised custom OF course the daughters
of the best people would never be allowed
to consider such a thing. This may sound
severe. and l regret that IL must, but IL
is quite true.
Question: If received an invitation to attend as
distant relative Of the family. q church wedding
followed by home reception. and it will be i'm
possible Tor me 10 80 20 that city how shall I sig
Nifty that I received the invitation and that can
not be present. | cannot send bridal present.
Can my sister simply write her name in pencil
as when We visit or must two cards Be senty
Answer: You should simply mall to
the person giving the wedding your sis
ter's card and your own. and drop a little
note Of congratulation. as formal or init
mate as you choose 10 make f. TO the
bridal couple. 1t would be perfectly cor
rect form 10 write your sisters name on
your card.
Question: We my wife and II entertain modestly
such Of our friends IS find our home congenaI. and
in return are occasionally invited out Now, AMONG
the places 10 which We 60 there is one quite be-
yond our means to compete with, and my wife
thinks We ought gradually 70 drop this one from
our list because We cannot return as good as we
get The man Of the house Is an old and warm
friend Of mine. and l dislike the idce Of giving
him up Quot fairel z. N r.
Answer: Your wifes idea that a quid
pro quo must always be given for social
obligations received IS a popular one. It
is. in a sense. proper enough. but one
need not pay kind for kind. a cup of
cold water and a biscuit are more ac-
ccptable from some hands than cham
payne and terrapin from others. Believe
me, il the man Of whom you speak is an
old and warm friend, ne will appreciate
the hospitality he receives at your home,
and be glad Of it. Don't give him up.