Los Angeles herald., 1907-08-04
NATURE STORIES
TOLD BY BALL MEN
DIAMOND STARS ARE ARTISTS WHEN 1T COMES DOWN
TO TOSSING THE BULL
Fred Glade Witnesses Thrilling Rescue by Drove of HogsStone
Goes Him One Better with His Wonderful Dog-Ofer-
ngs from Others Have Nice Listen

$50 putting down the religious book he
was reading the old gentleman took his
cane and went out on tour of tnvestiga-
ton, and what do you suppose he dis
covered?'
Nobody making noise like guess,
the genial Ollie proceeded: why, my
uncle found on reaching the vicinity of
the birds that they all appeared to be
under the leadership of large and very
black crow, who, perched on the limb
of locust tree, gave orders to the back
birds through a series of short croaks.
LAS my uncle watched the birds for
short time, what was his astonishment
to see that each blackbird would take
grain of corn and fly over the hill with
1t. Being curious to find out what be-
came of his property unc' followed the
birds over the hill, and there he saw
sight which sure did astonish him for
fair.
"For the blackbirds were not doing a
thing but taking their grains of corn and
putting them on the railroad track, so
that when the cars came along they
would mash them UP into edible sizes.
Well, unc said that was the cutest trick
he had ever heard of. He always thought
that 1t must have been the idea of that
old black crow.
but for a true nature story" added
Olll6, as ne tOOk a lTesH CHeWb lAihh
that my uncle's experience compares fa-
vorably with the best of them.'
Its pity your uncle, the preacher,
was not born in the time of Ananias,"
said Jimmy McAleer, when he had suf-
fciently recovered from the shock of
Pckering's story.
"Why SOP" enorted Ollie.
Because" calmly replied Jimmy, as
he ficked the ashes from his cheroot;
had that devout relative of yours lived
in the days of Ananias there would be
no mention made of that ancient In the
histories of today; notwithstanding the
claim made about astonishing things hap
pening in connection with nature Stories
Hickman's Unfinished Narrative
Throughout the time that the st. Louis
players were doing themselves proud with
their nature stories Joe Cantillon, who
hates to see his players beaten at any
game, kept squirming uneasily IN MS
chair, while at the same time MS glance
wandered anxiously from one National to
another, in the hope that some one of
them would come back at McAleers men
with a corking story along nature lines
that would eclipse the efforts Of the boys
who dress in brown.
Jones. Patten, Ganley and even the new
man Shipke gave slight outward evil
dences once or twice that they were
| likely to get a story off their cnestsi
and on these occasions the hopes OF Man
ager Cantillon rose high; but seemingly
| after listening to the stories of Stone and
Pickering the Washington boys gave
it up.
But lust as Cantillion's hopes were al
their lowest ebb who should raise them
to the highest pinnacle but the deponalr
Charley Hickman, who started in as fol-
lows:
"It lust occurs to me that 1 know a
little story that might be added to TINS
nature series, gentlemen The incident,
continued Hick, occurred under my own
personal observation, and for that reason
I hope no one will doubt the truth Of 1t;
though l know myself that it may appear
a little singular to you all
"Spit 1t out, Charley" chorused the
entire Washington bunch, who were de-
lighted to have found champion IN the
ever popular Hickman.
"This occurred explained Charley,
"when was lad on the farm up In ONO.
We had a peculiarly affectionate COW
that father had raised from baby calf,
and was a regular pet OF the famliy'
Well. when this calf grew up into the
dignity of a self-respecting COW it de-
yeloped some of the most remarkable
traits One of the most remarkable OF
these traits" went on Hickman, was
its fondness for cigarettes"
"Its fondness for what?" shrieked
Niles.
"Its fondness for cigarettes" calmly
replied Charley, who seemed not TO no
tice the excitement that his remarks had
occa stoned among the members OF poth
teams. why, each morning, believe me
or not, but that COW just as soon as
a.
ette. and then getting into hammock
Hickman got no further, for with a
Wild veil both teams started after the
heavy hitter, and Charley beat it to the
best OF his ability in the direction OF his
bedroom Cantillion made elaborate
apologies, attributing Charley's weird
imagination to the effects of the heat.
But Hickman, from behind closed doors,
sent out an official bulletin to the erect
that 1t was solely jealousy on the part or
the other players which prevented his un-
reeling the championest old nature story
that had ever been told.
Fred Clarke and Nature
Fred Clarke the Pittsburg captain, ac-
cording to Deacon Phillip, the pitcher,
must have been getting pretty close TO
nature last spring just before 1t was time
for him to report for duty with his clup,
for the deacon, calling at the residence
of Charley Lever in order to accept
Levers invitation to dinner, said as he
came in the door:
"Why, 1 just neard from Fred Clarke
Charley and from what he writes me he
must be getting lower and lower in the
world every day."
''Why, how is that?" cried out Lever,
who was genuinely alarmed at the news.
''He informs me in this letter. calmly
replied the deacon, as he brought forth
the missive from his pocket and pre-
pared to unfold it. that he is at present
engaged in the arduous task of digging
ninety-foot well on his Kansas farm"
And then Leever cried, "Oh, fudge, IN
so loud a tone that his wife came hurry
ing In and declared that no swearing was
allowed on the premises.
What Connie Told Rube
Connie Mack, who doesn't get heap
of newspaper notoriety about being the
best manager yet and a lot of more bush
wa, but who nevertheless gets there just
the same, Is one of the quietest indi--
viduals in baseball today.
OF course, there is a skeleton in Con-
nies closet, and this Is nothing more or
less than the celebrated Mr.. Waddell,