The daily democrat. [volume] (Anadarko, Oklahoma) 190?-1908, 1907-03-06
OLD IDEALS GONE.
EARLY MARRIAGES ARE NO,
LONGER POPULAR.
Attractions Of Bachelor Life In Large
Measure Responsible for Changed
Conditions - Excessive Cau-
tion Among Young Folks.
az MARGARET z. sANosrER.

modern cities, one of the first notes
he would make I'm his tablets would be
to the effect that people no longer
married in their early twenties. In
his day he would remember, with a
puzzled shake of spectral head, that
the wedding bells rang for girls Of l6
and boys of l9 respectively, and that
such marriages were common and a
matter of course
Except in primitive communities,
apart from the beaten tracks of civili-
zation. girls and boys do not now mar
~ and take on themselves the respon-
sibilities of bringing up large families.
marriage is more ana more postponed
until women have gone beyond 25, and
men 33 and "a years of age. What is
the occasion Of the change?
The ghost could not grapple with
| the problem lie would have nothing
i'm his experience Of human life TO eX-
plain It, with us affairs are differ
ent. We understand the forces that
combine 10 influence the prudent lover
| and to restrain the ardent one, and we
quite sympathize with parents who are
| aghast at the very thought that their
sons and daughters in some hour Of
impulse, mas marry at the age they
thought entirely proper in their own
case
Life in the great cities is extremely
easy for the bachelor whether he be
a man Of large means or of compara-
lively limited income. When bachelor
apartment houses became the fashion,
they took the place with many men
that was once filled by the home ideal.
| A man used to fancy that he needed
a wife to look after his domestic com
fort, to sit at his dinner table, to pour
mis- tea, 10 mend his stockings and
help him entertain his friends. These
were a few of the prosaic details in
cluded in his theory of married life.
AS things are now managed, a single
man may live ineXpensively and very
comfortably in rooms for which he
nays a monthly or weekly rental. His
meals are obtained at a restaurant in
the building or in the neighborhood;
he is free to go and come without en-
cumbrance.
His visiting list may be long or
short. He may spend much money
or little live simply or luxuriously,
as he may choose. His independence
Is absolute and at an instants notice
he may give mis- landlord warning,
store his furniture or resign the key
of his furnished room and go to the
end of the earth He is a welcome
guest I'm the homes of married friends,
and If he be gallant and debonaire he
Is a favorite in society and, on the
whole, has very good time.
The shadows of a lonely future do
not project themselves across the path
Of the man under 40. He declares that
he cannot afford to marry and very
possibly the fact that the cost of living
is constantly on the increase has much
to do with his contented and some
what selfish bachelor state. There
are people who for a small remunera-
tion will keep his clothing in order,
and his linen immaculate. His din
ners are apt TO be good, and he may
know, If he like, to a fraction, the
amount he must spend annually to
, maintain his position, and the amount
he may save for a rainy day.
With women the reasons for the
postponement Of marriage are more
complex. The love of home, the love
of children and the need to be dear
and precious to some one out of the
whole world, are inwoven in feminine
character Yet women do not often
marry for convenience, or that they
may change their names from Miss
Priscilla Jones to Mrs. Jonathan Rob
/ bins, or that they may attain brevet
rank in the community by being mar
ried Women are largely self-support-
ing. II is to-day almost an unheard
of thing that a man shall remain
single to support his unmarried Sit
ters Before the civil war, an epoch
which materially changed other social
conditions in this country, for all time,
Il was a frequent occurrence that a
man quietly and unselfshly gave up
his own preference for marriage that
he might toll for the maintenance OF
his sisters.
The war-cloud that broke in terrific
storm over the states in 1861, swept
away from north and south into low
ly graves, a vast host of bread-win
ners. II spared and sent home to their
womenkind another host of invalids
and cripples. Women undertook as
they had not done before, tasks n
wage-earning beyond their doors. All
great wars in modern times, in every
country under the sun, are followed
by this result Women are forced into
the open and learn TO take care OF
themselves and Of those who depend
upon them.
A girl who pays her own way, who
buys her own clothing and has her
own bank account seldom marries in
the first flush of girlhood. She grows
fastidious, too, sets a high value on
herself, is unwilling to marry unless
she meets her ideal lover, and then
she counts the cost. Is he likely to be
I g.. n.