The Montgomery advertiser., 1907-07-11
DRIFT " OOD . ny PHIL N. ARMSTRONG.
Adverffser ShQfa.

II A woman thinks it is not nearly so wicked to drink punch out. Of Q cut glass bowl meath a bower of artificial ferns as it is to drink beer out of 8 bucket.
 Keep the thoughts clean and your right living will take care Of itself. A woman can take on more over meeting a baby on the sidewalk than a man would hundred dollar bill. A woman can hardly ever open . telegram without tearing it. P The South is said to be getting rich CT at the rate of $7,OO0.000 a day; now you old fossils who are always kick ing put that in your pipe and smoke IL According to statistics sixty-one and a half per cent. of the graduates or Yale have married by the time they reached 43. Yes. but have they stayed married? A pie crust is said to have started a strike in a Detroit factory: Probaoiy 1t was a promise which, like Q pie crust, was made to be broken.-Nash- or yet maybe 1t was made by a young bride who was uniearn"d in ths>' culinary art, Frederick J. Belka. Baltimore man. has been street car driver, gripman and motorman for thirty-seyen years and in all that time has never report. ed late nor had an accident For most of fine time he has been on the Madi- son Square line.-Exchange.
 That man never attended banques the night before.
 A man must not only know what side his bread Is buttered on thess days, but must also be an expert as 10 the quality of the bread ' Tn building up a reputation only a few in the world can erect sky scrap CTS: the average mortal seems content with an adobe hut After all what did Mir. Rockefeller explain?
 It is stated that one pair of English sparrows can have 275,O00. .0OO,00 de- scendants. In order to please Teddy why not engrave this noble little btrd on the back of the American dollar with the stork on the front?
 Now is the time of year when man sits up at home slipping a mint Julep under an electric fan while ms wlte and the cb1dren are on at some stuny hotel fighting mosquitoes and dressing for dinner.
 The Way of It.
 Mabel has. married lawyer and on Good Lord; then she's a bigamist."
 In the Country B'GOsh. .- 50 your daughter has returned from college. Has the school good curri- 'uaG% !oh, yes; Mary had a special suit made fer It, an exercises in ther every day on the horizontal bars.
 There Are others.
 q understand she Is one of the cling ing vine variety"
 "Yes; she, clings to you as long as she has string on you.
 Ringing Tones. He is very eloquent
 Indeed. did he speak to you in ring '"s SYes; tSH' We're engaged"
 Those Men.
 "VanBlow Is club footed?"
 How do you make that?' "He foots it to the club almost every night"
 Thln Mary.
 Mary had a little limb,
 CItts fleece was fieecing men).
 For every where that Mary went
 They knew not she was thin  BathOs.
 .NTv moor man. I suppose you never think of carving your way 10 wealth or fame? ,,,-I r ue carving my way to fat turkey right now"
 shrewd.
 what Is the way to your homer he Sa! ~ !1rbv .vou just walk down Dexter Avenue three blocks until you come to a candy store. where you stop, then ana its the first house on the corner of the second block on your right N
 Helpless. "please nelp the blind" said Love
 While the cruel world passed by. For each soul knew that the sly It,
 Had dust within his eye. 
 StringIn' Beans. stringfn' beans with Susie,
 On the old back porch at home How I'd like to shake the city, Where the morning glory's twin'ng
 Round the posts-oh what a charm Stringin beans with Susie Way back wonder on the farm. stringin' beans with Susie. Oh in fancy let me go Where the bright tin pans refiectin' All her white teeth in row. Where our heads lean close together 'TiIl we smack-0t ain't no harml-a When you're stringin' beans with Susie Way back wonder on the farm. Stringin' beans with Susie. Down the long, long stretch O yearA With it's little spurts O joy An its everlastin' tears. I cain't recall no occasion That possesses greater charm 1 Than stringin' beans with Susie Way hack wonder on the farm.