Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-06-23
ANSWERS TO
CORRESPONDENTS

lin this column will he answered all questions Of
should write on one side only and address their let
tiers Uncle Jasper" Star Office. In OF DIM
week or two Consequently Il may be advisable
Tor all Questioners 10 watch this column carefullyl
SERIOUS-why is 1t that folks say tho
President is only a theorist railroad
matters? Ale travels In a private car
and not a day coach. Fine reason, eh'
T. U. K.-Why is it. Uncle Jasper. that
some people in Japan feel that the present
Japanese ambassador is not we'll equipped
to fulfill tho duties of his position? A
Viscount AoM is not tennis player ana
does not care for horseback riding.
MOTHER-Dear Uncle. Is II true that
there has been a boom in the buttermilk
business? A.-Unquestionably. tho
President hands out a signed photograph
for every glass. All the folks up Oyster
Bay way trying to sour the disposition
OF their cows.
INTERBSTED.-Is It true that the in
creasing use of motor cars has been
splendid thing for trade? A.-That seems
to be the case. The undertaking industry
was never in better shape.
AUNT ELIZA.-Dear Uncle Jasper,
know you are a deeply religious person.
Cannot you suggest some way to improve
the present method of dancing. which I
consider to be mere hugging set to muster
A.-You right about our character.
aunty. But why not cut out the music?
That would help some.
ANTIOUARY-IIncle Jasper in passing
through ono Of the cemeteries outside Of
Washington just the other day I saw an
inscription on tombstone which said:
Here lies lawyer and an honest man"
Now. did tho person who had that done
think 1t was necessary or what was the
reason? A.-Why. tits very simple. There
were probably two men buried In that
grave.
LITERARY.-what Is the best seller out
west. Uncle Jasper? A.-The cyclone cell
lar is in the lead In Kansas and We are
not familiar with the other states. The
sunflower state Is so unitarian.
Some folks like the President
In dress clothes. made with care.
But my little boy much prefers
To his Teddy Bear.
TECHNICAL note that battleships arc
being made bigger and bigger. What Is
the logical result OF this? A.-Peace con-
ferences will be held oftener and oftener.
Our butcher loves to drink too much
And everybody prays
That some fine day he will reform
And give up his bad weighs.
PROUD FATHER.-Uncle Jasper, m,
daughter wants to marry a count or
baron. 1 know such marriages are ar
ranged right along. but I want to know
If l can buy on the installment planr
Ayes, you can. but the family Will take
him back II you miss A payment. That's
the good thing about the nstallment plan
In this case.
JOSEPHUS.-I read in the paper the
other day that a celebrated prophet had
predicted that this the last year OF
the world. What do you think about it?
Aust our luck. Our endowment policy
is not payable until 1903.
EMELIE.-Please Uncle Jasper, give me
one of your famous recipes for chocolate
melange. A.-Take tender melange. not
too ripe peel and remove the seeds. Then
cut into quarters, boil until tender and dip
into chilled chocolate favored with cara
way and violet pumice. This Is clever
little dish for hot weather and Is good for
the teeth.
POLITICAL.-What do you think OF
Senator Foraker's speech? Awe can't
think coherently the subject. Wed
quote to you what the man who sits next
to us said about it. but he has threatened
to do things II we ever mention his name
in this column again.
All the knocks and roasting s.s
Must have made the weather man hot,
For holy suffering Mister Moses.
Will you feel what we have got?
UNCLE JASPER.