davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22
HUMOR or THE DAY

What a bright little thingl" exclaimed
the society woman. patronizinsly cooling
park Who's little one is this 20 - 'i'e
yours Fam, replied the nurse. I'm
the new nurse that KEN yistherdy."-
Fioorwalker-se See here. Mr.. sayles. that
66e Gus Id complains that you didn't show
sales.m man Scott I. showed her
nothing. If didn't show her that we
haven't got it.-cleveland Leader
Miss Youngbride-I have not the sIisbt-
est est idea how the wedding service begins.
IL have to look it UP.
gifts that have been sent -in)-Why not
begin Isll Know all men by these presents?
Jonah having, been swallowed by the
bad. It beats the flat was living in, any
Saying which. he. squeezed into the spare
bedroom and took a snooze-Milwauke
Sentinel.
On Your f6 , da1ghE b is skillful performer
Yes" answered Mr.. Cumrox 1.-THE
way she can play for hours without get
ting an earache or sprained wrist proves
10 me that she's uncommonly EXPERT
Washington Star.
Here's a letter from a Young man >,
SAND the answers to.correspondents edi-
himself of the cigarette habit
TEL him to marry a strong minded
snake editor.-Chicago News tue
What you need, said the doctor SIS a
II know it," replied the manager of the
one-night stand company, but, confound
It, didn't come to talk business with you
I'd like to find out about this buzzing in
my ears. Chicago Record Herald.
n oil
who whittles. that every one has a per
feet right to his own opinions
But in the majority of cakes the man who
thinks that way doesn't know enough to
keep them to himself. milwaukee, Senti-
Shell see an average man needs 1900
He-Yes, but he doesn't want IL In one
batch of biscuits, dear!-Yonkers States
man.
Now that your sons in college. sup
B Be getting til into the 4o Se'y exclusive he'll
"Oh. he's more exclusive than that al
ready; he's on the Observation-Disclosures dell aia
Pat.Is Casey tn boss in his own
Afike-only whin he's drinkIn' in Dolin.s
saloon.-Judge.
Citiman-Well, well. looking for another
Subbubs-Why. no, / can't say
Cftiman-What? You just said Won
were 80
Subbubs-I did not. I said I was look
ing for a cook. The others we've had
were not.-Philadeiphia Press
"Old man., I'm sorry to see you carry
such en- umbrella as that
Why so, dear boy? / think rs a ma
culiarly fine one and a credit to any
so it is, old man; so it is. Tn, sorry
to see you carrying It because IL looks
exactly IKE one l used to carry and have
lost track of somehow. "-Chicago FRS
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22
THE RIGHT DIAGNOSIS

Justice Brewer of the United States
supreme court says that the lack of re-
very largely by the acts of the legal
prolession in resorting to technicaH-
lies TO prevent the laws being enforced
we are inclined to think that the judge
70, 20 p ~ right in his iagnosis.-Otta-
apout IT. If verdicts might more reg
una, larry ne based upon the evidence and
1essf anected by the bubbles of the At
e eGpirneys. and if 1t might be possible to
i ,nri.e the delays that are due to
Juggling and the resort to technics IL
ti ies, court costs would be reduced. JUS
ice would be speedily administered
%hu we would have increased belief in
worth Times Lea FeH-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

In commenting on Sedalia's pro-
test against Burton's lecture there,
and the fact that in st. Joseph only
thirty people turned out to hear the
ex-senator. Roy Tapley says that if the
old Kansas Missouri rule holds good.
this unpopularity in Missouri ought to
make Burton mighty popular In Law
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

The Parsons Sun warns the Republi-
cans of the First congressional district
that while the Democrats are not say
ing much, they may try to sneak their
candidate in next Thursday while the
Republicans are not looking. The Suns
warning will be received and placed on
file, but the Republicans of the First
district won't worry much-for the
Democrats have no candidate.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

Evidently there WAS a large supply
of names in stock when the Alfonsos
looked the assortment over. They took
an even dozen for their baby. Perhaps,
however, they got them cheaper by the
r7o1ar1
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

Wichita has passed an ordinance pro-
hibiting the giving away of liquor as
well as selling it. Hereafter the man
who keeps a barrel or two in his cell
lar "for his own use" will have to use
it. himself instead of calling in his
eonvivial friends to help him.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

It's a lucky thing for Dan Anthony
that the Socialists put up a candidate
for congress in tomorrow's election.
otherwise he would have-been compell-
ed to stay away from the polls or vote
for himself.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

After reading the comments in these
columns last week concerning the
method in which the business men of
jamestown, Kan. drew people to their
town. Ewing Herbert writes to the
state journal that the gift enterprise Of
the jamestown merchants is in violation
Of the lottery laws. 1t may be-and 1t
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

The statement in the dispatches
from San Francisco that Schmitz Is
mayor in name only. leads Tom Cor
dry to remark that it isn't very good
name either
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

1t will be noticed that the federal
department of justice came to Kansas
to get man to prosecute mining
frauds in Colorado, and United States
Attorney Bone will go to Denver for
that work Kansas has the Bone and
the sinew for such things.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

The fact the richest man in Wiscon-
sin has been elected United States SEN
ator does not discourage w. r. Stubs.
Mr.. Stubs knows Kansas man who
is fairly well-to-do, who, he believes,
would make a good senator.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

Little Alfonso will miss lot of trou-
BILE in a few years because the other
kids will be afraid to tie knots in his
shirt when they go swimming togeth-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22
FRON OTHER PENS
NOT ALL UNIONS


The labor unions have been making
TOOLS OF themselves over Meyer and
haywood. They have attempted TO
turn murder trial into a great state
case IN winch the principle of consti-
tutional government was at stake
with no knowledge of the facts ex
cept such as any newspaper reader
can possess. they tried and acquitted
the DEFENDANTS and challenged the
courts to set aside their verdict. Mr.
Roosevelt was indiscreet in his letter to
Mr. Sherman CHASING Meyer and Hay-
wood with Hartman as undesirable
cltlzens- A president of the United
States ought to be very careful how he
plays with public sentiment when men
are on trial for their lives. But if he
was 1ndfscreet what is to be said about
selves to be drawn into a conspiracy
to intimidate the courts by virtually
threatening class war unless a jury
acqutts two men charged with a re-
Voting crime of violence New York
World.
THE PRESIDENTS COURAGE
The Meyer and Haywood type of
Americans and their followers have, as
the president says, been engaged in
melting the people of their commu-
nifty to crime and enmity to the law
and are undoubtedly undesirable citi-
zens: and it is gratifying that the
president of the United States has the
courage to speak OUT boldly and hon
estly and with a vigor which is ap-
plauded by all good citizens.-Phila-
delphfa Ledger.
NOT ALL DEMOCRATS.
Bryan's overlooking audiences in
Vermont do not necessarily prove that
there are any more Democrats up
that way now than when the late
George NJ. Stearns said that If the
Democrats of Vermont wanted him to
address them. it would be preferable
that they should gather in his back
yard at Chicopee. Republicans are
now large factor in the Bryan meet
ings.-Springfield Republican.
NOT PROBABLE.
Even il the country has not heard
anything striking from William Jen-
nings Bryan during the past few days,
it is not at all safe to conclude on this
account that the Nebraskan has quit
talking.-Cincinnati Times-Star.
WILL TAKE THE RISK
Mayor Tom johnson looked
thoughtful as he inspected the cleo
ton returns from Chicago. but insist
ed doggedly that he's going to run
again.-Detroit Free Press.
HARD TO OVERCOME.
The habit of backing up to the steam
radiator is pretty hard to overcome
this spring.-ToledO Blade.
JUSTICE.
Ruef says he fears Injustice in San
thing that scares him.-Philadelphi
Ledger.
HONDURAS.
Honduras Whatsoever anything. from
a mule to the residency.-Baltimore
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

There is a schooIrna'a am famine II
Kansas. but it isn't worrying the farm
ers nearly as much as the harvest
hand famine.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22
ONE ON HAYS WHITE.

Speaklng of Hays B. White for gov
',rl recalls job that j. w. Berry mt
up on White. Mrs White had been 70
o one state Agricultural college. The
ca,,1d we're crowded and Mrs White
t t md her ticket The cond1ico
o eor was Grabbed and said she would
orf tL nave to produce a ticket or get
al .ne train. Mr.. Berry, seeing her
e eiSo called the conductor to one
lad e a ~ d, SAD. DO you know who that
saig he said he didn't. stWelI"
9ala Berry. "She is the wife of Senator
N nays q; White who has worked hard
, 81 nor the railroads than any other
h I,lait IA Kansas" The conductor went
r. any toId Mrs. White not to worry.
- MoulQ De all right. When RerTv
Gacches White in crowd of polftjcians
Republican. 1e"eil
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

one can not talk about mortgage
Filters in Kansas any more; There are
no mortgages to lift.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

kansas" says the Birmingham Age
Herald, proposes to grow big wheat
crop, despite all drawbacks. In the
classical language of the breezy west
hot
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22
WHAT KANSAS MIssE11

With Ohio practically won the fight
I W Ia1t is to be carried into New
1ork. what a fprettyi fight Kansas
missed by getting into the Taft hand
wagon so soon.-Salina Journal.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

Anyone contemplating starting
new daily paper ought TO go 10 Gar
den City. 1t has only three.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

There is a suspicion abroad tnat mos
Taft clubs are really Mulvane cluOS IL
disguise.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

Have you forgotten that there Is
congressional election In this olstflct
tomorrow?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

What's the matter at Panama? No
body has resigned for three weeks.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

Kansas doesn't care how high wheal
goes, just so she gets big crop OF
It
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22
LA FOLLETTE

g., Inat man La Toilette of Wisconsin
IS paying hob with the cogs. levers
ana nall-bearing cranks of the old
Il.dcnlnes, many of the boss engineers
OF which are going to soon find thems
serves out of job. His San Fran
cisco speech. delivered to an audience
largely composed of business and pro-
iessIohai men, proved a veritabIe po-
litical bomb La Toilette Ivo1,Id 81
up Roosevelt's policies and carry them
out without hftch.-Wichita Eagle.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22
LOOKS coon

Fairbanks and Crane', is tba tic1-a+
demanded by the vested interests Of
New York and New England. But
New York and New England will not
oomlnate the next Republican nation
mated that will be no more h ostiia -
vested interests than Roosevelt. but
not subservient' to them Taft ana
Hughes looks pretty good to the west
Hutchinson News. z
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS.

And SIN wheat goes up.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

Ruef says he fears Injustice in San
Francisco. But it's exactly the other
thing that scares him.-Philadelphia
Ledger.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22
WILL TAKE THE RISK.

Mayor Tom johnson looked
thoughtful as he inspected the cleo
ton returns from Chicago. but insist
ed doggedly that he's going to run
again.-Detroit Free Press.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22
HONDURAS.

Honduras fightseoVer anything. from
a mule to the neutrality-suspicious.
Sun.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22
Eva BOOTHS Policeman.

you are under arrest! You are dis
turbing the peacet' snarled police
man, breaking off her first public
prayer in the streets of London. She
was still in her early teens, a slight
slip of a girl with no means of resis-
lance, and as the bullying officer
frightened his grip on her arm, she was
dragged shrinkingly with him.
But the action aroused the SYM
pathies of the rough crowd as light
ed match fires a keg of gunpowder. In
an instant the policeman and his pris-
oner were surrounded, and before the
officer could raise his voice he was
beaten to the pavement under a show
er Of fists.
1t was the girl prisoner who, forget
ting his rough trip and the cell to
which he would have dragged her, ap-
pealed to the throng in his defense.
When the crowd finally retreated, the
policeman was >groaning with two
broken legs and a mass of bruises
from head to foot.
For weeks the little girl in the big
Army bonnet paid faithful visits to the
helpless man in the hospital, and when
he was released, a warmer friend Eva
Booth and her cause could not have
found in all England. To this day she
receives letters in rough. sprawling
hand. signed simply, Your police
c. Weir, in the World
Today, for May.
Flower Clocks and Revolving Gardens.
II shall introduce this season. said
Philadelphia landscape gardener,
1.-TWO novelties on the grounds of a
Newport millionaire. One will be a
floral clock, the other a revolving flow
er bed.
THE clock is to be a circle 90 feet
in diameter. The face will be of grass.
The hands will be white carnations.
The numbers will be red roses. pan
sizes, seliotrope, and so on. This clock
will work electrically, and of course
the. mechanism will be concealed. Will
it keep good time? oh, the best. I
made an experimental one last week
that varies only Is seconds a day.
The revolving beds will be a fea-
ture of a sunken garden. There will
be four of them, each about 2 feet
square. and they will revolve electical-
ly at the rate of a revolution minute.
"These novelties will be the first mo-
ton pieces ever introduced into Amer
lean landscape gardening"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22
HARD TO OVERCOME

The habit of backing up to the steam
radiator is pretty hard to overcome
this spring.-ToledO Blade.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

MISS Youngbride-I have not the slight
est idea how the wedding service begins.
I'll have to look it up.
Her AdOrers (glancing at the veddfne
gifts that have been sent -in)-Why moi
begin Know all men by these presents ?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22
NOT ALL DEMOCRATs
NOT PROBABLE.

Even il the country has not heard
anything striking from William Jen-
nings Bryan during the past few days,
it is not at all safe to conclude on this
account that the Nebraskan has quit
talking.-Cincinnati Tim es-Star.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

Here's a letter from a Young man +"
sand the answers to-correspondents edi-
tor. who wants to know he can break
himself of the cigarette habit
Tell him to marry a strong minded
woman who objects to it." growIed the
snake editor.-Chicago News -
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

Your daughter is a skillfuI performer
on the piano, Is she not?''
Yes; answered Mr.. Cumrox. 1.-The
ting an earache or a sprained wrist proves
to me that she's uncommonly expert, -
Washington Star.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

Jonah having been swallowed by the
whale, rubbered around This Amt SO
bad. It beats the flat was living in, any
Saying which. he squeezed into the spare
bedroom and took a snooze.-NIilwauke
Sentinel.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

What a bright little thfngl'' exclaimed
the society woman, patronizingly cooling
at a baby e.Es out for an airing out in the
Yours ma'am" replied the nurse. I'm
the new nurse that KEN yistherd'y."-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

II have always commended said the man
who whites. that every one has a per-
feet right to his own opinions >"
TRUE, replied Senator Badger, .'fe has
But In the majority of cakes the man who
thinks that way doesn't know enough to
mel
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

Shell see an average man needs 1 coo
pounds weight of food yearly.
He-Yes, but he doesn't want IL In one
batch of biscuits, dear!-Yonkers States
man.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-05-22

what you need" said the doctor. .is a
change OF scenery"
Il know 1t" replied the manager of the
it. I didn't come to talk business with Won
I'd like to find out about this buzzing in
my ears. Chicago Record Herald
Crittenden record=press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1907-1909, 1907-10-10

Eskew Bros. agents for the
Horse Shoe Brand fertilizer.
Crittenden record=press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1907-1909, 1907-10-10
EDITOR OF The COMMONER WAS The GUEST OF OUR CITY.
Hon. w. Bryan Twice the Democratic Nominee for President Spoke Large
Crowd at this Place Tuesday Morning.

A better day for Mr.. Bryan to
visit Marion could not have been
made to order Tuesday, Oct. Sth,
1907. will 20 down in history as a
bright and glorious day-a Bryan
day. The day dawned auspiciously.
not a cloud was in sight aud from
early dawn until the appointed time
for the speaking the people came in
two : and tours and in droves. That
they camr to see Bryan was evidently
the fact that they went direct to the
depot, and many of them did not
even come up town, At the depot
the crowd which was so dense that
many hundreds did not get to hear or
Crittenden record=press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1907-1909, 1907-10-10
Kentucky State Medical Association.

My Dear Sir:--l take pleasure In
informing you, for your columns,
that the Sind Annual Meeting Of
the Kentucky State Medical Associa-
tion will be held at the Gait House
in Louisville on Tuesday, Wednes-
day and Thursday, October 10, 10
and II. Two-thirds of the physi-
clans in Kentucky are members of
this Association and it is estimated
that this will be the largest meeting
ever held. Especial attention will
be given to the Pure Food question,
and there will be an extended dis
cussion on diseases of the thyroid
land, and papers will be read on
the latest developments in the treat
ment OF typhoid fever, appendicitis
and other diseases. The new opson-
ic theory of treatment of disease will
be explained by lecture illustrated
with stereoptlcOn. BY special in
vitation DR.. George II. Simmons,
the great Editor of the Journal of
the American Medical Association,
will be present to explain the pur-
poses of that magnificent organiza-
ton.
The purposes of the Kentucky
State Medical Association are purely
alt Rustic. It's members are studying
together how to prevent disease and
how to cure it. Any notice you
give of this meeting will be appre-
ciated, not only by your local physi-
clans, many of whom will participate
in the work of the session, but by all
of your people who are interested in
the public health.
Very truly yours,
A. T. MCCORMACK, Secretary.
Crittenden record=press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1907-1909, 1907-10-10
Crlfienden County Boy at Harvard.

Beverly Todd Towery en- route to
Harvard, writes US as follows:
Dear Mr.. Editor ! regret very
much that | have no; gotten in to
see you aud all my friends aud ae-
quaintances of Marion this summer.
| am now on my way to Harvard
University, at Cambridge, Mass,
where will be entered into the Law
Department. | am both glad and
thankful to be going and believe
that my people have the same feeling
toward me, The INN ortal excellence
of culture and learning, though hard
TO attain, i, within the reach of the
humb!est citizen OF the land, | will
strive hard to reflect due honor and
upon my native county
and State. Yours Truly,
BEVERLY Tom TOwE ~
Crittenden record=press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1907-1909, 1907-10-10
Married Wednesday Afternoon.

The marriage Of Miss Carrie Moore
Of this city to Mr.. VI. +. Bacon, Of
Hopkinsyille, was solemnized We'd
nesday evening, a. previously an
uounced in these columns. The ccre-
mony was performed at the Method
1T Church at 3 o'clock, Rev. j. =.
Adams, officiating. There were no
attendants, only the ushers Messrs.
Robert Cook and ChAstain Haynes
preceding the bridal couple to the
altar. The bride, tastefully gowned
IN a gray travelling dress, with hat
and gloves to match, and always a
beautiful woman, was unusually
handsome on this occasion. The
church was decorated with potted
plants, palms and ferns and bril-
liantly lighted making the scene Of
loneliness never to be forgotten. The
happy couple left Immediately after
the ceremony for Hopkinsville, the
grooms home, where they will reside
and took with them the best wishes
of hosts Of friends both here and
elsewhere.
Crittenden record=press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1907-1909, 1907-10-10

even see the speaker, it was variousIy
estimated from two to three thousand.
The public school was dismissed at
1870 a. m, to give the 400 chill
dreu an opportunity to see the dis
tinguished visitor, and most of them
availed themselves of the opportunity.
The special train arrived as pre-
viously advertised at ll:l5a. IN. Mr..
Bryan was given an ovation when
the train came rolling in amid the
blasts Of steam whistles and music of
the Marion Silver Cornet Band. -
He was introduced by Congressman
James in his own immitable way, and
Crittenden record=press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1907-1909, 1907-10-10
Large Contract.

One of the largest contracts ever
pulled down by a Paducshan has been
captured by W. F. Katterjohp, who
will furnish ballast for l, $50 miles Of
track for the YazoO a. Mississippi
Valley Railroad company. 1t will
require five years time to complete
the task At Greenville, Miss, Col.
Katterjohn will dredge 1900, 600
yards of gravel from the Mississippi
nver. He is in Padueah today max
ing arrangements to buy a sand and
gravel digger or dredge boat. Over
! 900 yards of gravel a day will be
pumped from the river bed that will
take two aud three big freight trains
to handle. News Democrat.