The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1907-05-02
By SONORA SARA.

I am q perfect slave" says a write
in woman's journal. That is an ole
story, and a silly one. I have heard i
all my life, from many a woman. Mar
riage makes slave of woman, ant
nothing else" Nonsense, little lady: i
isn't marriage that does it, it's life tina
does 1t. If you live at all you have go
to do as other things do. spin OF starve
You cannot find an exception. You
education has been faulty. You have
got it into your head that the worI(
owes you a living; that some man ough
to have come along who would worl
for you, without your having a care
But II such man could have beer
found your very relief from ordinary
cares would have created some unusua
and extraordinary ones. should like
to have you look about you and fine
just one woman who is not bound tc
do something, compelled to think, OIL
feel, or do. or all together. If you think
you find such case you will only have
to look a little deeper to discover youl
mistake. Life does not anywhere allow
anyone to be free. So you may vel
say you are a perfect slave; only DOM
think you are an exception. The only
tolerable lot in life belongs to the per.
son who takes up her duties with cour-
age and resolution.
Could matters be arranged otherwise
and be better for US? There is no doubt
but life Of care is the best possible
life. But a habit formed of looking al
our special difficulties as exceptionally
large is where the trouble comes in.
know a little woman who has her share
of trouble, but who doesn't complain
She says: Il always think Of two things
in order to choke down grumbling
first, ] think how many others are a
great deal worse off than l am; and
then I think how very much of my
difficulty is my own fault. When I be-
gin to Fret it sets loose a fret spirit all
thru the house. Then I know that no
one ever gains anything by stewing it.
and so I manage to keep a very COM
Portable feeling in my heart" But ]
have another friend who is not so much
of philosopher. II can't step out OF
my house." she tells me, without bed
lam breaks loose. So it seems to me
There Is always something happens
There is nothing to be done but just
keep my eye on every blessed thing,
every blessed minute, and that, you see
makes a complete slave of me-" The
poor, dear thing! What will the uni
verse do when she dies? Will it be able
to run on, or will 1t just have to stop
When I go for visit with neighbor
and come back the fire is out; some
child is hurt; a window is broken; the
supper IS spoiled; som ething is knocked
over and broken. But it isn't much
better when I am there. I declare for
1t, but you can't have everything in or
der without just steady fight for it
then what comfort can one have in it 2"
Such woman should either cure her
self of fretting or never be a mother.
The effect of this continual expression
of discomfort and dissatisfaction with
home life and everyday duties is dis
astrous to the character of children.
They grow up with lack Of apprecia-
ton for our cares, with which really we
ought not to expect to burden them
and then all their afterthoughts of us
are associated with our weakness. Who
wishes to be retained in her own babes
memories as a disagreeable faultfinder ?
But We have more than this to consider.
Nothing is SO delicate and sensitive as
children's nerves. II our habits of
tongue are such as to rasp harshly on
these, we shall do much to destroy their
power to respond to the beautiful. /
believe nearly all children can be made
responsive TO the finer sentiments, If we
exercise self-government.
But what really is that which some
call bondage? Is 1t anything more than
method of nature to test us? / saw
my boys with some sticks of ash and
hickory, making arrows and bows They
did not use each straight stick simply
because straight, but tested them with
their knees and feet, and threw away
all thai splintered in the fbers. A hui
man being Is not certainly a useful be-
ing by the fact Of a human birth. Can
We endure well? How shall We know
that We can unless we are tested? On
the whole, are We not complaining of
the very best feature of our social ex-
fSfanca1 trr,n WI
true child trainer. true bond of love
in society? Let 1t be found out by a
trial service.
The work of household is slavery
only In its lack Of novelty. Its every
day duties are reiterated until they nau-
seate. But the secret of good house
keeping Is invention. We ought to be
able to devise methods for Frightening
each day with something new. Sir
Joshua Reynolds answered a quack that
he mkt his paints with brains" Our
meals should be planned as well as
cooked with brains. We must put our
minds as well as our hands to what
ever we undertake. This will soon abol-
ish dread routine. Food is made appe-
thing and the table hour attractive by
flowers and conversation. see no rea-
son why course of delightful study
;i.sy not go on in connection with our
\
dertake severe problems; nor do I be-
lieve in heavy dinner talk, or awfully
wise table talk. But there are scores
Of delightful books on art and esthetics
that one may read a few passages from
just as the meal Is being served, and
so a topic, light, yet instructive, be
ready for use. Nor do quite see why a
newspaper may not be social medium,
rather than be secretly munched by the
ord of a household. When there is a
paper the most important news
ian be selected for general discussion.
That is one way of tightening upl
home life and relieving monotony. But
the trouble with women frequently is
that they make slaves of themselves
They are resolved not to get out of
bondage when they can. know women
Who, altho naturally intelligent, live
about as inteiiigently as a coffee mill
Or a grindstone. They tell you they
must DO as they do; that they have no
line TO do anything else. They even
go so far as to divide the household, |
allowing their daughters all leisure and
while themselves devoted to |
'outine plodding. I know of no such
a Shareholder as ones own |
'elf may be. unless possibly it be ones |
)etted children.
But 1t is a knack not born in some
people to enjoy anything in the doing
# 1t. Such persons get their own re-
axation in complaining that they have
iutfes in the world. They want to get
hru and sit down and fold their hands
brewer. So their idea of heaven is e;er-
lal rest, where somebody else wifi dol
he work and will wait on them, and /