davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
GFrom the Chicago News.l

IFrom the Chicago News.l
Any man can marry an heiress-in
a novel.
It's hard for the diffident lover to
say soft nothings.
Bookkeepers for ice companies
make lot of cold calculations.
Many bad man has been cowed
by the milk of human kindness
Give some men bread today and
they will expect pie tomorrow.
When an awkward man lends a
hand he's apt to put his foot in it.
The joke is usually on those who
marry at leisure and repent in haste.
A woman can never understand how
1t is possible for smart man like her
husband to get the short end of a
lawsuit.
1t always arouses more or less sus-
picion in a mans mind when he ex-
poets a scolding from his wife and she
fails to deliver the goods.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01
SOME LIGHT FIGURES.

The argument against the recon-
struction of the city plant at a cost of
Sc {, 900 is that if the city could pos
sibly operate the plant at a cost of $48
per lamp (Which it can not dol, and
could save over the Edison proposition
$4,000 in ten years, at the end of that
time the city would have the bonds of
SOS, 900 on its hands and would have
no plant.-Topeka Capital.
Evidently some one has been mis-
leading our morning contemporary.
For at the end of ten years it would
either have a $4,000 plant or it's
equivalent. When Mr.. Freeman figures
the cost of lights at $4S a year he in
cludes depreciation on a $4,000 plant,
and he also figures five per cent in
terest on this amount, so that his fig
ures are very liberal. In figuring the
value of the plant at $4,000 Mr.
Freeman considers the old plant now
worth $25, 700 to which he adds the
$500 necessary to rebuild it. So
that at the end of ten years under
the municipal ownership the city
would not only save $4,000, which it
would lose under the Edison contract
but it would also have the equivalent
of a 100000 plant. while under the
Edison proposition 1t would have moth
ing-its money would be gone, its
present plant would be gone. and it
would be at the mercy of a corpora
ton.
In the above statement the Capital
denies that the city could manufacture
its own lights at a cost of $4S per
lamp. This is simply the bald asser-
ton of those backing the Edison prop
osition as against the opinion of a dis
interested expert who made a careful
study of the situation. It is shown
that Mr.. Freeman figured in every pos
sible item-nOt only interest and de-
probation on $4,000. but also taxes
lost.
Municipal ownership has been
splendid thing for Topeka in the past.
1t Will continue to be in the future-if
given a chance. And the people
should be allowed to say whether it
shall be abandoned or not
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01
JOURNAL ENTRIES

A Topeka mother was caused con-
sidera BILE worry yesterday. Her seven
year-old son voluntarily washed his
own ears and the family feared he was
sick.
would you say, who will do, or
whom Will do?'" asked the travelling
man in the writing room of hotel.
Neither" responded the New York
man, looking up from his writing. II
say, Hughes will do
The trouble with t5S many Socialists
is that they are not social.
Over in Bulgaria they are arresting
long-haired men on suspicion that they
are ana rchists.s This is warning to
Jim Nation, Ewing. Herbert and Prof.
W. A McKeever TO keep away from
Bulgaria. '.f--.-N -t{ -..~
The Wichita Beacon has instituted
a Query department. Will the Beacon
kindly answer this for the benefit of a
number of persons who are anxiously
looking for the band wagon: Who
will be the next governor of Kansas?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01
GLOBE SIGHTS.
[From the Atchison Globe.I

Iron the Atchison Globe.1
| A scoIding woman is bad enough,
| but the limit is a scolding man.
Nothing is so often overestimated as
| the information given "confidentially. "
Opportunity rarely comes to the
| man who spends all his time waiting
| for it.
theoretically, every man knows how
to make a lot of money in hurry
AS a rule, what a man calls his
| rights represents merely desired
privileges.
You may have forgotten more than
the other man knows and still be a
short horse.
Telling fortunes may not be very
good business, but it pays better than
having yours told.
What has become of the old fash
toned girl who said to the boys: Sir,
keep your distance!" -.44
What has become of the old fash
Toned man who said of his enemy: He
is a fool for Lack of sense ?"
Every married woman hopes that
when she gets sick the doctor will
recommend change of climate.
A woman with children never runs
out of work, or patience. although the
latter gets pretty low at times.
While men make sport of the sacri-
fees of women to vanity, they con-
tinue to wear coats during hot
weather.
w men tnere are as many as -FOUR
girls with a man. each one is thinking
that the other three are chaperons.
A book is being advertised entitled
How Fortunes Are Made Enough
suckers investing in this book is one
easy way.
There are many kinds of fools but it
is hard to believe that enough of one
variet'- ever got together to organize
a suicide club.
Women will excuse a man for crying
over the woes of stage heroine. but
condemn him heartily if he should
weep over his own trouble.
The old man who marries a young
woman in order to have some one to
take care of him." is more in need of
a guardian for the same purpose.
If a man must braS on his own
good qualities, he should choose some
subject other than his great honesty; |
much talk on that subject arouses
The Young Thing in the hammock
on the front porch thinks she knows |
a good deal about it. but the superla- |
tive joy of hand holding is only learn |
ed by having the best one in poker
game
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01
QUAKER REFLECTIONS.
From the Philadelphia Record

[From the Philadelphia Record.
Any man who can write a successful
love letter could turn his hand to
fiction.
No. Maude, dear; plank in a politi-
cal platform is not always a gang
plank.
Some people are so exclusive that
they object to even having common
sense.
The spots on the sun don't worry
the average mother so much as the
freckles on the daughter.
There is something in the wind
when the street cleaning department
gets busy on a blustery day.
A woman has an insane idea that
it is impossible to look well and be
comfortable at the same time.
"If give you a dime" remarked
the benevolent old gentleman, what
assurance have 1 that you will not go
off and get intoxicated?" Sir ex-
claimed the weary wayfarer, with a
remnant of pride. do look like
person who could get intoxicated on
a diner
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

he did not see me, and escaped him.
But lately something seemed to can
me back. 1 have been fighting 1t on
for two years, but 1 grew so hungry
for the sight of home, to hear the
sound of your voice and to look. upon
your dear face again. never
dreamed that 1 should find you here,
that We should have our brief hour
alone"
And are you content with the
hour?''
1T is better so. Should stay on it
would all come back. I think 1 shan
return on the steamer Saturday. IL
am not a strong as I thought.
MAY 1 go with your" she asked
softly, as her hand slipped into his.
Lucy" The agony in his tones
thrilled her.
you silly boy" she whispered, as
the regal head bent toward him.
Don't you know that it was I who
called you home? could not find
you save with my spirit and my love,
and I have not called you in VAIN
but your husband" he stammered.
'tHe died two years ago. she said
simply. THAT was why / called you.
dear. You answered to the voice of
love- copyrighted, 1907, by c. H.
Sutcliffe.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01
A SATURDAY SERMON.

| PROHIBITION VS.. TEMPERANCE.
| These ought ye to have done, and not
/ to leave the other undone.--Matthew %:
| Once in awhile the suspicion arises
| that Kansas has too much prohibition
1 and not enough temperance; or rather.
that the opponents of intoxicants de-
pend altogether too much on prohibition
/ to stop people from drinking and they
/ neglect to preach real temperance.
This paper believes earnestly in pro-
hibition and the enforcement of law.
Prohibition is a great aid to sobriety,
decency and prosperity. Nothing has
happened in Kansas in many years to
develop a respect for law as the pres
ent crusade against liquor selling. But
after every joint has been put out of
business, some men will still drink
and the law cannot stop them. The
only way to reach them is through tenn
perance and not prohibition. Their
number is not large in the aggregate,
but it is larger than it should be in a
state like Kansas, where the saloon is
an outlaw and the drinker is ashamed
to have his habit known.
We are told that the records of the
forty drug stores in Topeka will show
about II 900 sales of liquor during the
liquor in open joints, the drug stores
do not make more than 1000 sales in
a month; so that at least $4,000 of the
May sales We're illegitimate. Fifteen
thousand sales of liquor were made
that ought not to have been made.
Besides this, there were undoubtedly
some illegal sales by bootleggers and
commissioned one-tenth what there
would have been with comparatively
open joints, of course, but more than
there should have been.
1t is this class of drinkers who are
bound to have liquor anyway that pro-
hibition will not reach. Temperance
arguments are needed for them, and
that is where the temperance move
ment in Kansas is too often weak. 1t
breaches prohibition too much to the
exclusion of temperance. 1t ought to
enforce the law. of course, but it also
ought to help the weak to break from
the habit.
Some men are bound to go to the |
devil from sheer meanness. but others |
keep to the downward way because of
thoughtlessness or because they are
bound by habit. The latter class needs |
practical help. Prohibition is aid !
in this direction when it removes temp t
tation, but it is not enough. The !
thoughtless class needs argument-how |
liquor destroys health and manhood, |
steals the brain and will power, and |
robs the drinker of his worldly goods |
without any adequate return; how
drinking mems services are at a dis |
count among railroads and other en-
pIoyers of labor. and how the drinker
cannot, in the nature of things, be the
man he would be if he let intoxicants
alone.
If Kansas had sufficient temperance
Of the right sort, it would not need
any prohibition laws.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01
HYACINTH AND ONION

There was purple hyacinth
That worried day and night,
Because it had firm belief
1t was an onion white.
And then an onion white, within
That gardens labyrinth,
Most fondly fancied that it was
A purple hyacinth.
The hyacinth that thought itself
An onion was not sad;
The onion that was sure it was
A hyacfnth was glad.
lis SO: we're happy or cast down
Anent our earthly lot;
When we think we're not what we are
: Or are what we ere not.
R X Munkittrick in Success Maya
zine"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR,
[From the New YORK Exnress

From the New York Express
An easy way to make a living lie No.
to try to marry It,.
When thing she wears Is comfort
able a woman is generally ashamed
The best recipe for not rettinz
scoloed when you go home late is to
A woman is terribly loyal to keen
longer. any
The trouble with a good reputation
Is .nat even II you try to live up to #
peopl9 know you are hypocrita
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

John @. Royce cites the fact that w.
r. Stubs was a guest at a dinner given
by NJ. A. Low at the close of the legis-
lature as evidence that Mr.. Stubs is
not sincere in his railroad views. 1t is
barely possible, however, that Mr.. Low
and Mr.. Stubs are broad enough and
big enough to hold diverse views and
still be fairly good friends.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

william Allen White has at last
written that play for Ezra Kendall,
and it is said that there is nothing
about 1t for the public to be shocked
at This can be readily believed for
two reasons: Mr.. White is not that
kind of writer. nor is Ezra Kendall
that sort of an actor
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

When airships become common the
innocent bystander may suffer more
than ever. He will not be able to avoid
danger by keeping off the track, for
there will be the possibility that air
ship passengers may drop on him every
little while.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

W. r. Stubs calls attention to the
fact that President Roosevelt is now
advocating federal charters for rail-
roads, on which Mr.. Stubs took a
pronounced stand last summer. Nat
urally the Lawrence man is feeling
fairly good about this endorsement of
the plan of federal control which he
advocated in the last campaign, and
which brought down on him severe de-
nunciations from the railroad organs.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

Speshul dispadge: A prominendt
merchandt uf PUNK. Mosoory, sticked
cackle bur in his finger. but he 49,
a boddle uf Dozens Antyskeptic Rain
to rub on i'd, und his life vas safed
Our correspondence fails to saw ch1lsd
now der mechandt habbened to be
oudt In der cackle burs
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

Senator Foraker has also been en-
dorsed for the presidency by the Afro
American League. The trouble is that
the leagues voting power isn't concen-
trated in Ohio and therefore won't do
Foraker much good.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01
hence.

Ruef and Schmitz appeared in court
at the same time a few days ago, and
neither spoke. Apparently each was
ashamed of the other-and you can't
blame them.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

May Irwin IS authority for the state
ment that married life is happier when
the woman is the older. Perhaps this
is on the theory that there is then a
better chance for her to boss.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

The steel trust is getting suspicious
of the Pittsburg brand of presidents
H. is thinking of taking one from Chi
cago next time.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

Those Salina bankers are not sus-
rected of the Silver Lake safe blowing.
They had tramped through the town
two days before. eF
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

Perhaps Ex-Governor Hagerman of
New Mexico thought 1T a good time to
dip in just as DR.. Long had the presi-
dents eve.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

Considering the number of puffs Gen
Kuroki receives, IT'S a wonder some en-
terprising manufacturer doesn't name
a cigar after him.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

It is only three weeks until thu
longest day in the year will be here
but you would never guess 1t by look
ing at the Thermometer.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

There are nineteen women in Fin
lands newly-elected diet. Finland
must think they are sweet enough
to eat.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

The harvest hand famine isn't wor-
rying Kansas farmers quite as much as
Il did, but It will doubtless be doing
business at the old stand a month
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

The death of Mrs. Mckinley leave:
Mrs Garfield the only surviving widow
of q president.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

Those eleven school ma'ams who have
resigned from the Topeka schools, are
liable to work for less money in their
new Jobs next year.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

The rain made it easy for people
who wanted to play baseball, to obey
the law on Thursday.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01
KANSAS COMMENT
WHO Is TIP

WHO IS IT?
Ihe sauna Journal says that there
- q man IN congress from Kansas who
Gculo not earn SIS a month in private
LIZ 1it. Let's see. Anthony in the first
uistrict would make more than that
working on any newspaper; Scott in
one second could command a fairly
Sooo salary on newspaper and could
also lecture; Phil Campbell in the
tnlrd Is fairly good lawyer and made
soIne money before he went to con-
sIess; ). M. Miller in the fourth is one
tiial would come under that designa-
ton; in the fifth district w A. Calder
I IIedu was never able to make living.
NHen elected to congress he was said
70 owe about everybody in Marshall
county; in the sixth district W. A
feeeoer was compare lively wealthy be-
lore gong to congress. He was a far
rher ana banker and made money in
O D places;~fn the seventh district Ed
u,auIson was drawing $4,000 a year
M .H erected to congress; in the eighth
district Victor Murdoch is in congress.
ne could command a larger salary as
a newspaper man than any other edi-
-! .oi IN the state. This analysis would
81 Mliiers2o or head.-Lawrenc
GOOD WORDsFOR THE SANTA FEE.
IN the case Of Rol1a Evans, the EN-
poria boy who%Iost an arm and a leg
VINE working for the Santa Fe, the
company IN giving the boy ten thou
sand collars without a lawsuit did the
IaIr tnlng, in fair way. The settle
lheht with the Mccullough boy, shows
d spirit or decency on the part of the
SANTA re that can not but make the
ROAD stronger with the people. There
should be no quarrel between the peo-
PIE PIE ana their railroads and their Gus
toner's. Fhe. operating department of
any railroad desices to DE fair. 1t tries
10 Please the people, and to get bust
ness Inc troubles between the peo-
PIE ana their common carriers come
ehllFeIy from the attempts to make the
ROADS pay interest on deals made in
rrenzled finance. When the railroads
ana ger out of the hands of stock gam
piers. the people will quit fussing. The
santa Fe, which has never mixed
much on the stock exchange, but is
operated by railroad men, is more
nearly peoples railroad than any
other in this country.-Emporia Ga
zette.
EVIDENCE
A Topeka, woman who wanted a di-
vorce had her poverty affidavit turned
down because she wore long gloves
The court was unreasonable. Any wo-
man who has recently purchased a
pair of long gloves is apt to be bank
rupt.-Lawrence World.
HOW THEY DIDN'T LEARN.
Scientists claim that the jack rabbit
can not run to exceed thirty-five miles
an hour. The scientists probably
learned this in a laboratory with mi
croscope, instead of getting out and
trying to run down a healthy adult
jack rabbit.-LaWrence World.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

Kurokfs conquest of America wa
not as hard a job as his conquest o
Manchuria.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01


tructioning uf Ulie islandt nit a ty-
phooselum would look more like
straight noos to me ,uf der islandt vas
speldt dufferendt. Els id stands. id
looks too much like a Dayeleahy-ism.
Dot cowboy vich failed to ride from
Chicago to Washington in a gifen time
may hat hessitated too much to show
off before der atmiring MATHS. Lods
uf US loos der race peacaus We stobp
to make grandstandishmendt
Again comes der repordt dot some
Moo Mexican Injuns ISIS feeding babies
to snake, vich ISIS unimpordtandt uf
true. We can not see Wy id should caus
any excitmendt, undil alder der de-
tailSs hat peen looked indo. Behabps
Injun make ISIS not wort moch in der
opben markedt. Berhabps also der
snake hat culdifated dot kind uf a
abetite, und i'd would be a harshibp on
him to switch to breakfast feed. All
desc minor detailss should be looked
indo pefore We gedt excited aboudt i'd,
anyway. allretty.
A noos idem sayss Denver ISIS full uf
detectifs From Vot We hat heard, id
ISIS necessary in Denver. Beside dot,
Carl Boilmer ISIS headed dot way on a
bicyciggle, yedt.
"Ge-speagink uf nerf," sayss Gus
Gobblesteinhauser, vile he looks two
times ad der pust uffis clock und puts
on full speed ahead, Eve musd nod
oferlook der streed car company. Id
ISIS Untitled to der whole bun. am
thinking uspechilly uf der sysdem uf
taking real niggle for ride from
der scemetary to der cidy. You gate
Oop niggle, bump der bumps to some
place ofer.in Parkdale. gedt ouf. dodge
switch enjines fer den minudes, come
oudt trough a hole in der fence near
der skentyfe hospital, squat on a nice
coldt curb stein und Wait fer q hour
und a haIluf. Den a car Games along,
und you gedt on und ask fer a trans
fer to Vashpurn, und der corndocter
says: "Say vot do yous vandt fer a
niggle-huh? Aindt two rides, a run
und wait wort a niggle mitoudt askin
fer anoder rider
Here hoping id aindt a inchustis to
anyvon ven I say dot id occurrences
to me dot id ISIS chusd possible dot der
reporter made a slight mistake in
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

OF course Indiana Is for Fairbanks,
but not hard enough to hurt.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

It appears that even the suburban
trolley car may have its disastrous col
lisions
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

Isn't somebody going to put block
in front of that Wichita crowd some OF
these days?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

It IS suspected that Indianapolis for
got all about Fairbanks Thursday.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

Here it is June l. Time for spring
n arriva
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

Now watch for the june bride crop.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

In commenting on President Roose-
Felt's declaration in favor of the pre-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

ne uno Mloer Flick ISIS going to keebp
i'd oop, hereby APPLICATION fer der chob
VI chanitor to sweep oop der amrny-
milton.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01
2.lC4llI.CI.31I

Dot te1espatch aboudt der des-
tructioning uf Ulie islandt NIT a ty-
phooselum would look more like
straight noos to me uf der islandt vas
speldt dufferendt. Els i'd stands. i'd
looks too much like a Daveleahy- ism.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01
GETTING ACTIVE.

Market reports say hog products are
dull. This doesn't include the street car
variety.-Indfanapo1is Sun.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01
HOW THEY DIDN.T LEARN

Scientists claim that the jack rabbit
can not run to exceed thirty-five miles
an hour. The scientists proba bly,
learned this in laboratory with a mi
croscope, instead of getting out and
trying to run down a healthy adult
jack rabbit-Lawrence World.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

Dot cowboy vich failed to ride from
Chicago to Washington in a gifen time
may hat hessitated too much to show
off before der atmiring MATHS. Lods
uf US loos der race peacaus We stobp
to make randstandfshmendt.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

quoting der manacher uf dot dance
haus ad Chamestown vich fired oudt
der sailors. Id sayss in der baper dot
der patrons obchected to dancing NIT
der sailorss. opine dot vot i'd intend
ed to say vas dot some uf der male pa
irons obchected to dancing alone.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

Dere ISIS Won mighty sad feature con-
nectioned nit dot case. Uf dey send
Schmitz to der pen. dey will cudt ouf
dem viskers und pompydourss, und
den he will be chused a plain, ornery
looking dub like anpody else, yedt.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-06-01

HUSTLE While YOU WAIT.
While waiting for your prayer to be
answered. try to get what you want
yourself.-St. Louis Globe-Democrat.