The French Broad hustler. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1896-1912, 1907-11-07
EDITOR HUsTLER,s
Matrimonial Bureau

&
Matrimonial Bureau
Dear Sir: In your issue OF Oct. 3lst, l
am credited, borrowing to its excess
sively unsentimental sentiments. perhap
I should say-Debited with some anti
matrimonial metre, but am quite sure if
you re-examine the manuscript, you viii
not discover the autograph Of Chuckey
Joe's chuns.
Some p~reposteriously claim that the
reason why Heaven is said to be so
heavenly, is that there is no marrying or
giving in marriage there. Possibly
that is why SO many of our Politicians
including those Publicans-the Tax As
SCISSORS, are doing what they a to
assure themselves of a warm reception
at q warm place. They may assume
that ifno~weddings in Heaven, there may
still be some in Hades.
Shame on. the SLirks, who dodge the
glorious m~artyrdom of the Matrimonial
Market, and proudly refuse to accept
such High-Menial positions as the Su-
perior Sex may be willing to accord
them.
Let us not forget that the MUSES., like
the Graces, all sisters of Sorosis. How
willingly does Wise Woman expend al
the hard. earned savings of the coarse
and commonplace Males, to acquire that
exquisite social polish which admits her
to the more exclusive and fashionable
circles from which her distinctly less
grand grandparents would be promptly
excluded. The exclusiveness of the
once excluded is something wonderful.
How heroically does the Newest Girl
face the ordeal of a secluded drive IN an
Fl. M. r. buggy-sixteen inches narrow.
How bravely they face the certainty OF
having their heads turned in the round
est of Round Dances. What taste in
their dressing; how much fire in their
firtations;what tenderness in the glance
of goo-goo eyes; how guileless their gas,
and how gushing their gossip!
~ just think of the graces even our rus.
: tie-born damsels.gain in a year or two
J at our fashionable Female Colleges.
Some misogynistical grumblers vainly
I insist that it is just these wonderful &C
complishments that--accomplish
nothing; but-perish the thought, thai
] lovely woman was eYer created merely
: to be the help-mate and house-keeper
s of some horny-handed husband, whose
destiny in life it is only to plough and
plant, to hoe and harvest.
What man, with a soul the size Of a
sixpense (even If his income equally
~exiguous,O would demand that his very
much Better-half, should wash and iron
milk and churn, sweep and cook?
The old woman of the past was a
household drudge; the new woman OF
the present, is a heavenly Divinity. Is
it at all astonishing that the refined
young lady, who willingly serves as q
|. professional nurse at some public hospi-
tai ther patients of all sexes, sizes and
even colors)-. should repudiate indig-
nantly the sordid necessities of domes-
tic service?
To the finite masculine mind, there
might seem some little inconsistency ia
this, but we must remember that unlike
your average man, your medium maiden
is-at bottom-something of a Saint as
well as a Sinners heroine as well as a
houri; and you must not measure her
bravery by her bushes. In fact blushing
is a lost art and wisely condemned in
fashionable circles as~-provincial.
Why should these lovely creations of
silk, satin and sublimated sentiment, be
hampered by the horrors of a poor mans
novels and the hardships of half-rationsp
As n of your witty correspondents
hints, a famine for one may prove a feas
for two; and If the woman is won Zone
-wha) reasonable man could object to
being reduced to only a vulgar fraction
in the equation?
The new girl, with her novel accom-
~plishments Chat accomplish nothing is
a lovely luxury far beyond the reach OF