Evening star., 1907-11-02
JOBSON PLAYS TENNIS

A CROSS the street from the JooS0n
~ domicile there is a tennis court
= Arriving home early one afternoon
not long ago Mr.. Jobson stood at one or
his front windows and watched the ten
mis- players-most of them active. young
ish chaps, the sons of the Jobsons neigh
bors.
Great fun those fellows are having
eh?" said Mr. Jobson to Mrs. Jobson.
Ms. Jobson agreed that 1t seemed TO
be fun.
Perfectly royal exercise. too, that ten
mis- gag" said Mr. Jobson.
Mrs. Jobson agreed again.
Not such a poor kind of a game,
either" said Mr.. Jobson. Lot OF sc!ence
and head work about 1t.
10 you think so?" sad Mrs Jobson
Il don't understand the game. Didn't you
use to say that tennis was game for
hoydeEs and Willie boys-that 1t didn
have a particle of sense about il?
Who: me?" said Mr.. Jobson. turning
from the window to stare at Mrs. Jobson-
Il see your subconSc!oUs state is Wo KING
hard again Me say that? Next thing. l
sup2cso yoUil be claiming that l said
that Theodore Roosevelt was a son OF
poor but honest farsra masicians; that
he was bora in tho PunjauD. went 10 the
public schools OF Tahiti, ser:ed III tE5
legislature of Siar:. worked on caEei
boat running from TitiiS to IcGeran. aGu
then addressed himself to the profession
of painting stained glass WINDOWS IN
Bombay
But" said Mrs Jobson, with insist
enc: somewhat unusual with her. d!Ca |
I always understand you 10 say taat you
thought tennis was on a par with afcherJ
and puss-in- -the-Corner, and tnat--
Il beg to inform you that l am not and
will not be responsible for what you
understood or understand, or for Wnat
YOU think YOU understood or understand,
cut in Mr. Jobson sharply. Gu can't
whaedle me into accepting the TeceiVer-
ship or the trusteeship for what You
please to call your understanding. don
emember ever to have alluded to the
game Of tennis in any conversation with
you. In the whole course of my life. But
II by some forgotten chance l ever DID
ailtide to 1t while addr ss!ng you. then
1t Is impossible but that | should nave Al
scientific games in the whole list of sports
That's what | think of it. and that's what
I always thought Of It.
Perceiv.ng that something was coming,
Mrs. Jobson was silent.
Not only is that the opinion that l
entertain of the noble and health-pre-
serving game of tennis went on Mr..
Jobson, after impressive pause. but
l am going to exhibit proof Of my thor
ough belief in the game by taking it up
myself"
'Yes?" said Mrs Jobson. non-commit
ally.
you can stick all Of the veiled slurs
in that Yes Of yours that you Internally
please" g~owled Mr.. Jobson. Never
theIees and Notwithstanding, I am going
TO take up the game of tennis. and at
once"
'Er-lsn't the game just--er-a little
well, Juvenile for" Mrs. Jobson began.
but that's far as she got. Mr.. Jobson
was scoWl!nS upon her.
That VIII be about suffciency broke
In M Jobson. IF 1t pleases you to try
to make everybody else you know be-
lave that I was an active participant in
ding matches and shoestrings around
Boston when the tea party was pulled
off. and that I fought under Jackson at
the battle Of New Orleans. why, go right
know how old I am. madam. And l also
know what is fitting for my age. And II
tennis BELTS the age and the dignity of
the President Of the United States, l
guess it isn't going to hurt me-
"Oh. 1t wasn't that SO much Mrs.
Jobson managed to get in while Mr.. job
son was taking breath, but 1t occurred
to me that perhaps tennis was an unusu
ally violent exercise for men to engage
in who are past their first youth"
You might just as well daplete and
decimate those illusions of yours to the
matter Of youth said Mr.. Jobson. I'm
at length ceasing to extract amusement
from cracks OF that character. There's
somebody else around this plant that isn't
go dead young as she used to be back III
the regime of President Arthur and It's
pretty nigh time that individuals around
this dump got on to that fact"
"Of course" put in Mrs Jobson. Il
have only your interest at heart, and if
you think that tennis isn't too violent.
and that 1t won't take too much out of
you. and that 1t won't make you too
breathless. and that after playing you
wouldn't become too stiff and sore, why,
Madam" Inserted Mr.. Jobson, in his
most impressive sepulchral tone, ut
doesn't make two Chinese copper cents
worth Of difference to me what you think
I think I have already observed. about
fortythree times. that I am going to en-
gage in the game of tennis All right
Very well That's what I meant and
mean. I was not conversing for the pur-
pose of listening unto the silvern asso-
nance of my chest tones. / am going to
play tennis. What IS more to the point.
l am going to play tennis right on that
lot across the street from he~e. What is
additionally to the point, I am going to
play tennis tomorrow afternoon. And If
you expect to experience the delirious de-
light of seeing me- brought in here
shutter after about ten minutes in
dulgence In the game of tennis. you want
to prepare yourself. here and now for
most disturbing disappointment. That's
all. Now you may busy yourself. if you
are not too tired after your arduous day
of fiction consumption to superintend the
preparation of something to eat for me"
After dinner that very evening Mr.
Jobson dropped in upon his neghbor over
the way who controlled the tennis court
and told him he'd like to learn the game
The neighbor told Mr.. Jobson that he was
very welcome to the courtesy of the ten
mis- court
But l say, old man." said the neighbo-
to Mr. Jobson, you know what you're
up against, do you? Pretty hot work
tennis. for us old Codgers. All right for
the youngsters. but, geai I wouldn't
tackle 1t for anything. and I've got
shade on you in the matter of age and
adiposa at that"
Mr.. Jobson didn't like this part!cularIy
but Mr.. Jobson. like most men. can't so
freely express his dislike of things to
other folks as he can to the wife of his
bosom. On the following forenoon Mr.
Jobson pu CHASED for himself a pair of
white linen tennis trousers and a tennis
suit and an expensive tennis racquet He
left the office ear!y-soon after lunch in
fact-so as to take his first wkack at the
court. A couple of the youngish chaps
already were engaged in play when Mr..
Jobson. looking very stiff and starchad
IN his new tennis togs. turned up among
them. painting freely from the simple ex-
erc'se of changing his clothes; but the
roCngish chaps volunteered to teach him
he game-not. however without exchang-