davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18
HORSES THAT WOULDN'T DROWN
Remarkable Deeds Recorded by Two
veracious chroniclers.

An Albanian VINO has just returned
from the east. where freshets have
been the rule, tells the following about
a horse which had been attached to
foot bridge crossing a brook, to
keep the structure from going adrift.
The food finally swept horse and
bridge down stream. Later, the
bridge was discovered lodged against
the bank. with the horse sitting quiet
ly on the former.
A bystander who had listened in
tently to this tale. remarked quietly:
Il see suthin', similyar oncet."
Indeed? What was it," asked the
story teller.
I'VE see." was the reply, "arter the
boss l see was took down stream, no.
buddy ever 'spected to see him alive
agin. But he was pow'ful sort O.
brute, an bout hour arterward we
see him a comm up stream a-pulin'
the blame ole bridge arter him!"-Al-
bany Evening Journal.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

Uncle George was an old colored
man who tried awfully hard to be
good. but 1t was very difficult for him
to keep from stealing. AS he ex-
planned 1t. 81 just nachally want to
take what lay my hands on"
Uncle Georges latest theft was a
pig. The more he thought about what
he had done the worse he felt. About
the middle of the night his wife awoke
and saw uncle still kneeling by the
bedside in earnest prayer.
why don't you get in bed?" she
asked.
"Oh. let me alone" replied Uncle
George; Use tryin' to 'splain to
heaven jus how happen to have that
pig, and the more splain the wusser
mixed l GET
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

A bill designed to restrain federal
Judges from issuing temporary in
functions against the operation Of
state laws has been introduced in the
house by Representative Clayton, of
Alabama.
Bills exempting all lumber and coal
from import duty have been intro
duced in the house by Mr.. Boeher. of
Missouri.
A bill making 1t felony for ma
tional bank or any OF its officers to
speculate with funds of the bank has
been introduced by Representative
De Almond of Missouri.
No business is being transacted in
the house of representatives except
the introduction of bills because the
committees have not been appointed
and Speaker Cannon has announced
that they will not be named until next
week.
Nearly 1000 bills were introduced
in the senate on the third day of the
present session.
Senator Tillman has introduced a
resolution directing the committee of
finance to investigate the recent pro-
ceedings of the secretary of the
treasury in connection with the finan-
cial crisis.
Senator Hansbrough will endeavor
to have salaries of rural carriers in
creased from 5000 to $1,000 at the
present session.
Senators Gore and Owens have
formally elected by the Oklahoma leg
islature. The 90 republican votes
were cast for Jones and Douglas.
A bill has been introduced in the
house making October IL legal holt
day to celebrate the discovery of
America by Columbus.
All the finance resolutions offered
in the senate have been referred to
the committee on finance.
Secretary of State Root gave din
ner in honor of the delegates to the
Central American peace conference.
Senator Jefferson Davis of Arkan-
sas delivered a passionate address
denouncing the trusts on the floor Of
the senate recently.
Senator Foraker has addressed a
letter to the chairman of the repub-
lican state committee of Ohio ask
ing that the delegates to the nation
al convention from that state be Sc
lected at a primary election.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18
BLACK, ITCHING SPOTS ON FACE.
Physician Called II Eczema in Worst
Form-Patient Despaired Of Cure
Cuticura Remedies Cured Her.

about four years ago was afflicted
with black splotches all over my face
and a few covering my body. which
produced a severe itching irritation,
and which caused me great deal of
suffering. to such an extent that l was
forced to call in two of the leading
physicians of - After a thorough
examination of the dreaded complaint
they announced it to be skin eczema
in the worst form. Their treatment
did me no good. Finally l became de-
spondent and decided to discontinue
their services. My husband purchased
a single set of the Cuticura Remedies,
which entirely stopped the breaking
out. / continued the use of the Cuti-
cura Remedies for six months, and
after that ever splotch was entirely
gone. / have not felt symptom Of
the eczema since, which was three
years ago. Mrs. Lizzie e. Sledge, $40
Jones Ave-. Selma, Ala. Oct. rs. 1906"
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18
The thoughtful always are thankful.

The system of COMPRISING air by
falling water, as installed in several
places in the United States and Can
ada, is claimed to have an efficiency of
seventy-five to eighty-three per cent.
The water flows through large hori-
zontal pipe to vertical one, at the
upper end of which is the circular loop
of an air pipe with a great number Of
fine holes in its lower side. and as the
water drops past the ring innumerable
air bubbles are drawn along and COM
pressed. At the bottom the water
turns suddenly and comes to rest in a
reservoir, into which the air rises I'M
der pressure. The compressed air can
be drawn off as desired, and when the
reservoir is full any excess passes
away automatically with the water car
ried to the surface in an outflow pipe.
The difference OF few feet In the
level of the inflow and outflow pipes
gives a rapid flow Of water while the
amount of compression depends en-
tirely on the depth of the hole.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

Laundry work at home would be
much more satisfactory If the right
Starch were used. In order to get the
desired stiffness, it is usually neces-
sary TO use so much starch that the
beauty and fineness of the fabric is
hidden behind a paste of varying
thickness, which not only destroys the
appearance, but also affects the wear
ing quality of the goods. This trou-
BILE can be entirely overcome by using
Defiance Starch, as it can be applied
much more thinly because of its great
err strength than other makes.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18
MANS LACK OF CALAMITY.
Or, az You May Look at It, Woman's
unreasonabIeness.

H. ]. Conway, of Chicago. president
Of the Retail Clerks International
union, advocated at the recent conven-
ton in st. Louis the same pay for
women as for men clerks.
when women" said Mr.. Conway
afterward. do the same work as men
they should get the same wages. And
anyone who argues that this is i'm
possible seems to me at once as I'M
gallant and as illogical as the famous
husband OF Paint Rock.
This husband was returning home
from market late one Saturday night
with his wife. The wife was burdened
with a huge market basket, a broom.
a kit of mackerel-dear knows what
all. AS for the man. he carried moth
ing.
Coming to steep hill. the wife
paused and said reproachfully:
Jack, II you were real man,
you'd help me carry some of these
parcels
Jack glared at her in disgust and
scorn.
LAW. how can II he growled.
Amt l got goth hands in my peck.
ets?"-Rehoboth Sunday Herald.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18
NEWS OF THE WEEK
Most Important Happenings Of tbs
Past Seven Days.
Interesting Items Gathered From all
Parts of the World Condensed
Into Small Space tor the Ben
eft of Our Readers.


Personal.
Col A. s. Colyar. distinguished
Iurist, statesman and author, Is dead
at Nashville, Tenn.
Secretary Cortelyou declares he has
no intention Of resigning from the cab
met at present.
Gen. William C. Gates has been ap-
pointed a commissioner to mark con-
federate graves by the president
DR.. William Wells. the Oldest pro-
fessor of Union college. is dead at
Schenectady. N. Y.
Maj. Thomas w. Park promi-
nent democrat of Platte county, Mo-.
and founder of the Platte City Land
mark, is dead.
A dollar dinner in honor of William
Jennings Bryan is announced for Lin
coin, Neb, on January Is.
Mrs. Nicholas Longworth. daughter
of President Roosevelt, was operated
upon for appendicitis at the White
house recently. The operation was
successful in every way and the pa
tient is expected to rapidly recover.
John Phil, Sousa. the bandmaster
is i'll in New York with an attack OF
bronchitis.
John Busha, veteran of the Black
Hawk war in 1882. is dead at Council
Bluffs, la. He was ia years of age
Joseph Hensley, aged 1902 years. a
farmer of Helena, near St. Joseph
Mo-, died recently.
President Roosevelt has issued a
statement reafiirming his former do
claration that he would under no cir
cumstances be candidate for prest
dent again.
w. B. Thomas has been elected
president of the sugar trust to fill the
vacancy caused by the death of ii. o
Havemeyer.
Edward Hicks Magill, former presi
dent of Swarthmore college, Penn
sylvania, is dead in New York.
James Henry Stoddart, the veteran
actor, is dead at his home in Sewaren
N. ].
James T. Smith has filed suit in
the Vernon county, Mo-, circuit cour,
against the Modern Woodmen OF
America for $4,000 for injuries al
legged to have been received while
being initiated by the Erie. Kan.
lodge.
Colonel Cocktails. engineer-in-chiei
of the Isthmian canal, will come to
Washington soon to advocate widen
ing the canal locks.
Mrs. Mary Curtis. who died recent
ly at Farley, Ia, at the age OF lOl
years, has a brother living at Hum
boldt, Kan. who is 104 Her father
died at the age of lis.
The president has named John q
Thompson OF Pratt. Kan. as an as
sistant attorney general.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

A novel French electric furnace is
in the form of mold. and is designed
for making vases or other vessels OF
pure silica. Within the furnace Is
placed a strip of carbon-pierced with
airholes--that can be made white-hot
by a strong electric current. The fur
mace is filled with sand. and by grad
ually heating the carbon layer OF
the grains is melted around 1t. and
when sufficiently thick is freed from
the loose sand. Further heating COM
pletely vitrifies the molten layer.
which is blown out by an air current
against the side ri the furnace or
mold. The objects. which are made
grayish by innumerable air bubbles.
have great resistance to sudden
changes of temperature.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18
Good Workers lily Rewarded.

Sweynheym and Pannartz, the two
Germans who were the first to print
books in Rome. used paper and types
of excellent quality. Their ink on
pages printed more than 400 years
ago can vie in blackness with the best
of the present day. Yet with all their
labors they often lacked bread. In
petition to the pope they informed his
holiness that their house was full of
proof sheets, but they had nothing to
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18
CHARMING an Audience.

A young lawyer with political as
pirations was about to make the first
important speech of his career. He
knew Speaker Cannon. and ventured
to ask his advice in the matter of ad-
dressing an audience.
MY son." said the veteran. find
out what interests your audience and
talk to it on that subject. II you
find you can't strike the oil of its
attention. stop boring it."-Success
Magazine.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

The extraordinary popularity of fine
white goods this summer makes the
choice of Starch matter of great i'm
portance. Defiance Starch, being free
from all injurious chemicals. is the
only one which is safe to use on fine
fabrics. Its great strength as stiffen-
er makes half the usual quantity of
Starch necessary, with the result of
perfect finish. equal to that when the
goods were new.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

Sheer white goods. in fact, any fine
wash goods when new. owe much of
their attractiveness to the way they
are laundered. this being done in a
manner to enhance their textile beau
ty. Home laundering would be equal
ly satisfactory If proper attention was
given to starching, the first essential
being good Starch. which has sufficient
strength to stiffen. without thickening
the goods. Try Defiance Starch and
you will be pleasantly surprised at the
improved appearance of your work.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

The pineaI gland and the pituitary
body-neither weighing more than five
or six grains-have long perplexed an
atomists. The former-behind the mid
die ventricle of the brain-is now sup
posed to be the remnant of third eye
of our ancestors. aud the rudimentary
eye is distinct on some lizards. with the
power of sight In two species. The
pituitary body. just back of the mouth.
has been lately proven to serve some
important purpose. Its chief function
is not yet clear. however. one authority
supposing that 1t destroys toxins. an
other that 1t is general nerve tonic.
while NJ. de Cayon regards both pitui'
tary body and pineal gland as regula-
tors of blood pressure in the brain.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18
Miscellaneous.

Lillian Wuln, ten-year-Oiu girl
who was recently kidnapped in Chica-
go, has been found in Monence. Ill. A
man and a woman with her were ar
rested.
The result of the house census
taken at Monongah, w. Va. shows
that 1888 men were in the mines when
the recent explosion took place.
Three hundred and twenty bodies
have been recovered.
William F. Walker. who absconded
from New Britain, Conn, leaving a
shortage in the savings bank Of $780,
900 has been captured in Mexico.
The democratic national committee.
in session at Washington. decided to
hold the national convention of the
party at Denver, Col. on July Z. next
The dowager queen of Sweden has
been seriously Ill since the death of
King Oscar.
The Santa Fe railroad has trans
ferred II cases from the Oklahoma to
the federal courts.
The Stock Yards Bank OF Com
merce at Kansas City has reopened
for business.
The date for the national encamp
ment of the G. A. r. has been set for
August 81 to September Z next at To-
ledo, Ohio.
Loss of life and great damage to
property is reported in eastern Penn
sylvania by floods caused by recent
heavy rains.
The National Mutual Fire Insurance
company of Omaha has been ordered
to discontinue doing business in Ok
lahoma.
Government statistics show the
average of winter wheat sown to be
10 per cent less than the area sown
in 1906. The total acreage now
growing is 31.O69,0OO.
The call for the 18th annual con-
vention of the American National
Live Stock association, to be held in
Denver January 81 and %. has been
issued.
At St Petersburg Lieut. Gen. Stoes-
sci pleaded not guilty to charge of
needlessly surrendering Port Arthur
to the Japanese. He is on trial in a
military court.
The first day of the attempt to re-
open the Goldfield mines with non
union miners passed without a dis
turbance of any kind.
The sale of tickets of admission to
the United States is the latest form
of swindle discovered by the immi-
grafton authorities.
The State Bank of Admire, Kan.
which closed after the failure of the
National Bank. of Commerce of Kan
ass City, has reopened for business.
A conference was recently held in
Lincoln, Neb., between William j.
Bryan and prominent democrats from
various parts of the country.
The mine owners have decided to
make an attempt to open the mines
at Goldfield. New, with non-union
miners.
The Massachusetts Humane society
has awarded a bronze medal to AS.
sistant Secretary of State Bacon for
bravery in saving life.
Fourteen British vessels will patrol
the river Whango to assist the
Chinese government suppress pratt.
cal depredations.
Eleven men were killed by the col.
lapse of a bridge under construction
across the Susquehanna river at
kiAasills. Pa.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

There s more Catarr in this section of the country
other diseases put together and until the last
few years supposed to be incurabie. For great
many Year, doctors pronounced local disease and
prescribed local remedies and by constantly failing
10 cure with it incnrable.
Science has proven Catarrh To be constitutional dis
ease therefore requires treatment.
Hairs Catarrh Cure, manufactured by y. J. Cheney
d Co.. Toledo, Ohio 10 the only Constitutional cure on
the market. Il IL taken internally in doses from 10
drops . teaspoonfui. It acts directly on the blood
and mucous surfaces of the system. They oner one
hundred dollars for any caxe II fnils 70 cure SEND
for circulars and testimonials.
Address. FL. CHENEY CO., Toledo, Ohio.
Sold By Druggists, 15c.
rake lIalrs Family Pills for constipation-
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

please hold up your hands,"
When the pedestrian heard the form
of request he knew the woman foot
pad was upon him.
I'D much rather have yours to
hold" he responded. calamity.
We'll, l must say you are n rude
thing" she rejoined, and lowered her
weapon, thus closing the incident.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

With a smooth iron and Defiance
Starch, you can launder your shirt
waist Just as well at home as the
steam laundry can; 1t will have the
proper stiffness and finish, there will
be less wear and tear of the goods,
and it will be a positive pleasure to
use a Starch that does not stick to the
iron.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

That an article may be good as well
as cheap, and give entire satisfaction,
is proven by the extraordinary sale of
Defiance Starch, each package con-
tanning one-third more Starch than
can be had of any other brand for the
same money.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

First Tramp (reading advertise
MCMILLAN wanted to chop wood,
bring up coal, take care of garden
mind chickens and children.
His Pal (groaning)-Oh, these mat
rimonial advertisements make me
tired!-Illustrated Bits.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

with kidney trouble
that 1 could not
straighten up after
STOPPING with o u t
sharp pains shooting
through my back. 1
had dizzy spells, was
nervous and my eye
sight was affected.
The kidney secre.
lions were irregular
and too frequent. 1
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

Young man Cat reception)-Beg par
don, but isn't this Miss Green?
Young Lady-No, sir; my name is
Brown.
Younm Man-Excuse me, but
might have known it. You see. I'm
color blind.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

II you are afflicted with Asthma
write me at once and learn OF some
thing for which you will be grateful
the rest of your life. Rev. ]. r. RAIDER.
S22 Broadway. Denver, Colo.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

Said She-Do you believe that We
really descended from monkeys?
Said He-No; but II we did. how
beautiful the monkey must have been
from whom you descended!
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18
GAVE Her AWAY.

Mr.. Borem Wright-Im sorry Miss
Kutting isn't in. Tell her called. will
you?
The Maid (absently)-I did, sir
Rehoboth Sunday Herald.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

was in a terrible condition. but Doan's
Kidney Pills cured me and have en-
1oyed perfect health since"
Sold by all dealers. so cents box
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18
Hinhhall2

Yeast-"Did you ever exercise with
a medicine ball?" Well,
I've taken something for snake bites.
IL that's what you mean"
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

Doctor-The increasing deafness Of
your wife is merely an indication of
advancing years. and you can tell her
that.
Husband-Hum! would You mind
telling her that yourself, doctor?-
Philadelphia Inquirer.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18
NASTY.

He-Do you think glasses would
make me look more intellectual?
She-Well, II / were you I'd try
them. They certainly couldn't hurt
any.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18
Appropriate.

Tom-what are you going to do with
that mouse?
Dick-Use It for bait
For bait?"
Eyes; I'm going for catfish. sgd
Fey Town and Country Journal.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18
Pretty Hungry.

Pretty Hungry.
Waiter, a beefsteak! Quick! I'm
in a hurry"
1--WE haven't any beefsteak. sir!"
"a chop, then"
Chops is OIL"
well, then. an omelet."
Impossible. sir; we"
What! why have you nothing at all
in your restaurant"
Yes, sir; we've got a sheriff"
Customer Sharpening his knife ON
the edge of his plate)-Then let's
have one.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

A good many men who get credit
for being close-mouthed are in reality
too lazy to talk.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

"What does Vernon do for living?"
HE works in a paint shop.
"Why, understand he was writer
for the magazines"
well. you asked me what he did
for . Nving."-The Bohemian.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

Customer-Tell me, truly. which Of
these two hats Is more becoming?
Milliner-This one. See! 1t con-
ceals your face more.-Brooklyn Life.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18
Point of History Cleared Up.

The Dentist-Now, open wide your
mouth and l won't hurt you bit.
The Patient (after the extraction)-
Doctor, l know what Ananias did Tor
a living now.-Illustrated Bits.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

Miss Gibson Girl-How long before
you can let me have this gown?
Dressmaker-Two weeks, miss.
Miss Gibson Girl-Heavens! In the
meantime he may propose to some one
else.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

Whenever you see man in distress
recognize> in him your fellow man.
Seneca.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18
A TERRIBLE CONDITION.
Tortured by Sharp TwInses, Shooting
Pains and Dizziness.

Hiram Center. 61s South Oak Street,
Lake City, MINI, says: 81 was so bad
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

A woman can keep a secret If no
body cares whether she does or not.
The Lamar register., 1907-12-18

PILES CURED IN TO IL DAYS.
p AZO OINTMENT is guaranteed to cure any case
~ itcbina Blind Bleeding or Protruding Piles In
TO IL da Us money refunded SIC.
The Ellensburg dawn. [volume] (Ellensburg, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1907-08-30
A CHAOTIC SITUATION
The Yakima Democrat Sizes up the Situation
In Republican State Politics.

Republican politicians OF this
state who are DESTROYS Of unloading
Gov. Mead and there is quite
bunch of them, are casting about
for a suitable candidate. In this
connection the two governors,
the two Nc s-McGraW and Nc
Bride-are being considered, cir
cumstancc that seems Just a little
funny in view Of the fact that
the party had practically
repudiated both before the close OF
their respective administrations.
It must be said, however, III favor
If the latter statesman that while
he was an accidental governor he
was one Of the best that the state
ever had. He had the courage to
deal with every situation that came
m and he usually dealt with 1t
viselv He insisted upon the rail
roads giving the people square
deal and he acknowledged no po-
liticaI boss as master. For these
two reasons he was defeated for re-
nomination in 1901 and replaced
bv an unknown politician of the
third degree, whom everybody
knows now is a weakling
Ex-Gov. Mcbride since his re-
,ire,ncnt has been practicing law III
Seattle. while his predecessor Nc
Craw, has grown rich in that city
through speculation in real estate,
Probably neither Of them would
,,o,r care TO re-cntcr public HE
anoir or in any event through the
door to the governorship' The
probabilities are that SO many ca"
G = will try their chances at
the republican primaries next year. ar.
thot Gov. Mead BY means OF ms Is
stote machine, will again carry oil
the prizc.-Yakima Democrat
The Ellensburg dawn. [volume] (Ellensburg, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1907-08-30
Advertised Letters.

A list of uncallcd for letters re-
naming uncallcd for i'll the post
office, I.llensburg, for the week
ending August %, 1907:
lack G. Applcgate, DR.. G. J..
Barker, Miss Lura Bashor Tom
Bachelor, Georgia Bates, John
Bcckman, Mrs. l.. y. Bennett
Miss Harriet Berry WE Boydon,
R. II. Bushong Mrs. George
Clark, Jim Cochran, Ted Colcman'
Ernest Collins, I'D Coynor' Ernest
Crawford, Jas A. De Lelorn, Hen
nv Elsncr, Henry Evens, IhoS
Evcns, John I'aylcr, Ernest Fields
Sam Fox, Paul Gales, Edward
Cine. Y. \. Hanna, Carl Hansen
FIovd r. Harrison ?, Blanchard
Harvie, Chas Y. Harvey G.
Heger, Herman l.. Hines, W. A.
uoIton Miss Susan d. Howard
G. 4. Hunter, Mrs. Byron Jack
SON. Miss Ida jacket Mrs. Frank
ZONES. +. Kcesan, Park LaniboT-
ston. Charles McAvoy, W. W.