davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09
Reason For the Heavenly Ladder

A young lady who taught a Sun
day-school class of young boys was
often nonplussed by the ingenious
questions sometimes propounded by
her young hopefuls.
One Sunday the lesson touched on
the story of Jacobs dream, in which
he had a vision of angels descending
and ascending a ladder extending
from Heaven to earth. One inquiring
youngster wanted to know why the
angels used a ladder, since they all
had wings. At a loss for a reply,
the teacher sought to escape the dit
ficulty by leaving the question to the
class.
"Can any of you tell us why the
angels used a ladder?" she asked.
One little fellow raised his hand.
please, ma'am," he said, "p'r'aps
they was moulting!" = Harper's
Weekly.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09
Rapid Transit Car Cleaning.

How long does it take to clean
the windows of one of our cars?"
said a railroad man at the Reading
Terminal. well, just as long as it
takes one man to clean one of the
windows. That is not very long, is
it? The fact is, the pressure on the
rolling stock of all railroads is SO
great now that when a train comes
in enough men are put to work
cleaning it to enable it to take it's
place in an outgoing train in a few
minutes. AS you can see for your
self, there is a man on the ladder of
every window of this car-and every
man is working as rapidly as he can
to clean his particular window.
When he's done they are all done
and the windows are cleaned. The
same crew then tackles another car;
going over it in the same way. A
few minutes does the job."-Phila,
delphia Record.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09
EIectrlfylnn All Railways.

in a paper read at the January meet
ing Of the American institute OF Elec'
trical Engineers 1t was maintained
that to "electrify" all the railways in
the United States would reduce the
annual cost OF operation-s1,400. OO0.-
600 in 1sO5-by $3.50. 600. 1000. In the
year named the average gross earn
ings of railways were $9,58S a mile;
average operating expenses, $e.4O9.
Electricity substituted for steam
would reduce expenses to 1926, a
saving of $1,144 a mile of line. This
saving. 1t was argued, would more
than take care of interest and depre>
citation of power plant, construction,
etc. But a good many engineers at
the meeting considered the topic OF
general identification of railways "in
the air" Where, they asked, is the
$2,6 SOC, O00, 900 1t would cost to make
the change to come fromf The
change, II made generally, will take
place but slowly and in some parts of
the country would probably not be
made for many years.-Baltimore
Sun.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09
PLEASE OMIT FLOWERS.
Three Words In Death Notices Mean
a Lot to Florists.
Please omit flowers

"Please omit flowers"
Those three words added to an OBJ
ituary notice deprive the florists Of
Chicago of about 100000 a year.
Some of the larger establishments
that cater to a fashionable trade are
hit harder than the small concerns,
but there is no florist in the city who
does not feel the loss entailed by
the three words quoted above,
There were about 10000 deaths in
Chicago last year." said a Madison
street florist, "and at least one.tenth
Of the death notices printed informed
friends to please omit flowers When
some person of note dies and flowers
are to be omitted at the funeral the
big florists are out all the way from
$25 to $500 each. Those who request
that flowers be omitted are the very
ones whose friends are we'll able to
purchase floral tributes, and would
otherwise do so. Many persons come
to me in the course of a year to
order a wreath or some floral design
for a funeral, not knowing that the
please omit flowers has been pub
lished with the death notice. All the
florists in the city have the same ex.
perience, and l estimate that our
losses in the year amount to $100, 900"
Chicago Record-Herald.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09
Heels 81 Cold.

Slippers OF cloth Of gold daExled the
eyes of beholders last year, but This
season mere cloth Of gold is not re.
markable in New York. Real gold
must be q part of milady's footwear.
Not whole slippers OF ~ carats; holy
smoke, NOT Just footwear for which
there are more overheels Of gold in
a graceful openwork design. They
go on over the heels Of satin or silk
slippers, which are the color OF the
gown worn. The delicate colors
CLEAN most attractively through the
openwork OF gold. Though It may
seem to Pittsburg women q great ex.
travagance to wear heels of solid gold
that is a mistake, for the same pair
Of gold heels may be used on many
set Of slippers.-New York Correspon-
dent Pittsburg Dispatch.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09
rLoRIcULTURE FOR CRIMINALS.
An Experiment in the Penitentiary Of
New Mexico.


Horticulture as a means of refining
the nature of the hardened criminal
is the remarkable experiment that Is
being carried ON at the Territorial
penitentiary of New Mexico in Santa
Fe.
In a we'll equipped, thoroughly
modern conservatory, which has been
constructed In the prison, some of
the most desperate criminals in
America car for a profusion of flow
ers of many kinds. General interest
is taken in the conservatory among
the $50 conyicts in the ~penitentiary,
and it is no uncommon thing, says
the Santa Fe correspondent of the
Los Angeles Times, to see a "lifer'
caring for a lily or a rose.
Since the convicts in the New Mex
leo penitentiary took up this new
work the morale of the institution
has greatly improved. There is hard
ly q convict in the institution who
does not welcome a chance to work
among the flowers. Bouquets are
clipped and taken to lonely cells and
dried flowers are carefully pressed
between the leaves of books from the
penitentiary library.
Superintendent II. o. Bursum has
been quick to recognize the good
that the conservatory is doing, and
every convict who desires to work
opoopo tbo Nouarc hoe DportuDitv m
while away time in the greenhouse.
Assistant Superintendent Garrett
is enthusiastic on the subject of fori-
culture in penal institutions.
There are few natures, no matter
how bad they may appear to the
world in general, that do not respond
to the refining influence of flowers"
said this official recently. "An hour
in the greenhouse beats any number
Of hours in solitary confinement when
1t comes to making a convict tract
able. He forgets for a moment that
he is in prison. He fuses around
among the flowers and his brain Is
soothed by the sound of the foun-
tuiA III liz loplNjJ luPICCd VI
dragging, and the poor chap actually
enjoys life. He takes the emem-
brance of all this to his cell with him
perhaps in the form of a bouquet.
He sings or whistles cheerily and his
good spirits prove infectious. Thus,
unconsciously, he assists in raising
the general morale of the prison.
IF convicts were given more such
work to do in their idle hours-more
gardening and raising flowers instead
of modify pacing the prison yard in
quest of exercise, or being kept peg
cling at contract labor all day, there
would be fewer tragedies in peniten-
tiaries-fewer attempts to break out
and fewer officials sacrificed in doing
their duty. Anything that can take
a convict's mind off himself is a great
advance in prison methods. Our little
greenhouse has done more good than
all the dark cells and other means Of
punishment eyer DEVISED"
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09
Just Keen on.

When today's difficulties overshadow
Yesterdays triumphs and obscure the
bright visions Of tomorfow's, when
plans upset and whole years Of effort
seem to crystalline into a single hour
Of concentrated bitterness, when little
annoyances Eat into the mind very
quickly and corrode the power to view
things calmly, when the jolts Of mis-
fortune threaten to jar loose the judg-
ment from its moorings, remember
that In every business, in every ca
reer, there are valleys to cross, as well
as hills to scale; that every mountain
range Of hope Is broken by chasms
of encouragement, through which run
torrent streams of despair! TO quit
In the chasms Is to fail. See always
n your minds eye those sunny sum.
nits of ~successt Don't quit in the
chasm! Keep on!-System.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09
Pied.

A large man who had imbibed free
~ passed down Broadway at the rush
hour last evening. A homegoing
crowd awaited a Lee avende car at
Broadway and olive. The intoxicated
man slowly pushed his way into this
crowd, but he was greatly %inconveni'
enced. He carried a mysterious cir
cular bundle Of which he tried to be
very careful.
When the Lee avenue car arrived
he boarded it. In spite Of his efforts
to hold back and proceed leisurely
he was forced onward through tie
crowded a His precious bundle
was reduced to a tattered package.
Its contents smeared his shirt front
and clothing with a brownish yellow
paste.
A fellow-passenger recognized the
bibulous one. why, William" he
cried, what on earth have you been
doing to yourself?" ooh, noshing
MUCH" replied William thickly, when
I started home with m'pie l din fig.
are on sush a full house."-St. Louis
Republic.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09
FRIENDS HELP
Paul Park Incident

After drinking coffee for break"
Fast / always felt lanQuid and dull.
having no ambition to get to my
morning duties. Then in about an
hour or SO a weak, nervous derange-
ment of the heart and stomach would
come over me with such force !
would frequently have to lie down.
cat other times l had severe head
aches; stomach finally became affect
ed and digestion SO impaired that l
had serious chronic dyspepsia and
constipation. A lady, for many years
State President of the w. G. T. u,
told me she had been greatly bene-
flied by quitting coffee and using
Postum Food Coffee; she was trou-
bled for years with asthma. She
said it was no cross to quit coffee
when she found she could have as
delicious an article as Postum.
Another lady, who had been trou-
bled with chronic dyspepsia for years,
found immediate relief on ceasing
coffee and beginning Postum twice a
day. She was wholly cured. Still
another friend told me that Postum
Food Coffee was q Godsend to her,
her heart trouble having been re-
lieyed after leaving off coffee and
taking on Postum.
$50 many such cases came to my
notice that ] concluded coffee was
the cause of my trouble and I quit
and took up Postum. / am more
than pleased to say that my days of
trouble have disappeared. / am well
and happy" @There's a Reason. Il"
Read. The Road to Mslytila,r IN
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09
TOOK HIS plcrArIoN.
And Then Got Work 40 His stenoa
rapher.

faphef.
She was riding into the city on the
morning train, In search of q posi-
ton aa stenographer. Having seer
the large, forid man In the seat In
front of her cut an advertisement
from his newspaper and put 1t away
In his pocketbook, she was just curl
u enough to look up the correspond
Ing place In her W paper. Finding
there an advertisement for a stenog.
rapher, she noted down the address
and thanked her feminine curiosity.
She then turned to her pencil and
notebook. 1t seemed as If, practise
as she might, she never could keep
her speed up to III hundred words
a minute. She tried copying from the
newspaper, but the motion of the cat
made the words dance before hei
eyes until they hurt her. She tried
making up sentences as she went
along, and failed. Finally she resort
ed to taking down the incessant chat
ter of two women behind her, but
their talk was often drowned in thu
disturbances of a number of young
people still further back, who wer,
r~iotously noisy.
The young lady struggled with /
TRADE ON the ~servant-girl problem
timing herself by the distance be
tween stations-two minutes from
Sherwood to Sherwood Corners; coIle
she do two hundred words? AS hei
hand dashed madly over the page, {
large wad of newspaper few past hel
and struck the f1orid man in the neck
The laughter behind subsidized into
dismayed giggles.
Slowly the large man turned his in
jured neck. He was redder than eyei
as he started to speak. The words
fell from his lips, hot bat distinct
swiftly but smoothly. He was telling
the boisterous young people sever
seats back what he thought Of them
The young woman with the pencil
saw her chance, and took 1t. Here
was glorious dictation. Her pencil
few. The speech lasted a minute
and a half. and was cut short then
only, by the arrival of the train al
the terminal. The stenographer slap
ped her book shut with a comfortable
feeling Of having done even bettei
than a hundred words per minute; ani
set off in search of her position.
When she arrived at the address
she had noted down she was ushered
Into a private Office, where sat the
man Of the speech. She stammered
a little until she saw that he did not
recognize her. His mind had been
full of bigger things. Then she
smilingly told him her errand.
DO you think you can take my die
:ation?" he said, %frowning.
Eyes, SIR"
What makes you think so? I talk
rery fast"
'fBut very distinctly, sir" She pro-
duced her notebook and laid it open
before him. Here's a sample" She
began to read her notes.
His jaw dropped. There was his
masterpiece OF the train, complete and
unabridged. 1t really sounded very
well, so full of fire.
When she finished he looked at her
sharply. His facesw very red but
his eye twinkled.
THE jobs yours" he said, in d
subdued voice.-Youth's Companion.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09
Indian Philosophy.

The other day Elsie, the oldest liv-
ing Tonkawa Indian, was making
some purchases in one of our hard
ware stores, and the enterprising
salesman called her attention to a
washing machine which he said
would make blue Monday" q day
of pleasure. Old Elsie admired the
gayly painted machine, but when she
was made to understand for what
purpose it was intended she shifted
the air in contempt. "Me no wash.
Pale face wash, wash-all time wash.
Wash Monday, Monday, Monday,
heap wash. Indian no wash; all
time dirty. Pale face wash; all time
dirty, too."-Tonkawa (Okla.) News,
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09
Absit Omen!

Absit omenh May. the omen be
away" Suppose a Roman sneezed,
a premonition of sudden death;
promptly he murmured absit omen, a
prayer that the omen might pass
away from him. 1t was a simple
prophylactic measure of much the
same value as the crossed fingers or
the rap of the knuckles on wood in
our present day avoidance of the ever
menacing hoodoo, most salutary prac-
tees which it would be a pity to for.
get.-New York Sun.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09
SouaW at a Bank.

A full blood Indian sQuaw attired in
the regulation costume of a well bred
society woman in Indian life-brght-
ly colored blanket and skirt with bead
ed leggings and moccasins, with the
latest approved Cheyenne couture,
which is the same they have been
wearing the past hundred years--was
recently seen to walk into the Ell
Reno State Bank and fill out q check
In a full round hand, which she pre-
scented at the proper window and re-
ceived her pin money, supposedly. The
officials at the bank say it is a COM
mon occurrence, but to the average
citizen 1t seemed a singular proceed
ing
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

We offer One Hundred Dollars Reward
for AMI case of Catarrh that canLot be
cured BY Halls Catarfh Cure.
f. j. CHENEY l. Co., Toledo, o.
We, the u d%ersigned, have known !: J.:
him perfectly honorable in all business
transactions and financially able to carry
out any obligations made by their firm.
WEST & TRUAx. Wholesale Druggists,
Toledo, D.
WALDINo, K1NNAN & MARVIN, Whole
sale Druggists, Toledo, ..
Halls Catarrh Cureis taken internally, act
inc directly upon the blood and mucuous sur.
faces of the system. Testimonials sent free.
Price, Toe. per bottle. Sold by all Druggists.
Take Halls Family Pills for constipation.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09
wall Street Term Elucidated.

What does this report mean by
saying that the shorts were caught
in a corner and s~queezed?'"
why, it means that they sold
what they didn't have to buyers
whom they had to get it back from
at a higher price in order to deliver
1t to them. Judge,
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

1 could not do ~housework, and for
two years did not get cut of the
house. The kidney secretions were
irregular, and doctors were not help
ing me. Doan's Kidney Pills brought
me quick relief, and finally cured me.
They saved my life"
Sold by all dealers. so cents a box.
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, n. y.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09
SKIN CURED IN A WEEK
After Suffering Six Months With Dis
figuring Red Spots and Pimples-
Cleared Away by Cuticnra.

"Cuticura Soap and Ointment are the
greatest remedies for skin diseases on
earth. / have suffered six months from a
disease which ] cannot describe, but ] will
tell you the symptoms. My skin was full
Of red spots and my face was full of red
pimples. 1t made life miserable for me
and l was discouraged with everything.
| went to several doctors, but it was use
less. | resolved to try the Cuticura Rene
dies, and after using them for about one
week l became a new man. The pimples
and the red spots have disappeared and
they made my skin as soft as velvet.
Albert eastman, Bedford Station. N. Y,
Nov. 90. 1905"
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

from kidney trou-
bles. My back panied
me terribly. Every
or move caused
sharp, shooting
pains. My eyesight
was poor, dark spots
appeared I me,
and had dizzy
spells. For ten e a
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

a Kansas editor wants to know
what has become of the ~old-fashioned
mother whose boys used to get up
the first time she called them. ihats
easy. She died about a million years
ago. answers the Topeka State Jour
nal.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

Rich Americans in Paris are kick
ing over the heavy taxes they have
to pay there. AS many of them ex-
patriate themselves, observes the
Pittsburg Dispatch, to avoid paying
taxes in the country where the money
was made the suggestion fairly pre-
sents itself that they vary the pro-
ceedings a little by kicking them
selves.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

Garfield Tea, Natures remedy, brings
relief from many ailments; it overcomes
constipation, regulates the liver and kd-
news, pt1rifies the blood aud clears the COM
plexion. 1t is made of Herbs, and is abso'
1utely Pure!
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

Women usually have a hard time
with parliamentary practice because
it is 50 hard for them to keep track
Of the previous question.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

When a man fails everybody Is
ready to give the reason for it. When
a man succeeds everybody is ready
to express surprise.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

The life of the mercury arc lamp in
some cases amounts to 5000 hours and
more. The conducting material of the
Rnode is either mercury alone, graph.
tie and iron. or nickel.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

Instead of experimenting with drugs and
strong cathartics-which are clearly harm,
ful-take Natures Mild laxative, Garfield
Teal 1t is made wholly of Herbs. For con
stipation, liver and kidney arrangements,
sick-headache, biliousness and Indigestion
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

Pfttsburg Leader says: 'The man
who gives tips is the man at fault.
He could end the evil and the annoy
ance II he would. By Withholding
tips he would force employers to pay
fair wages to their help. That is
the only solution of the problem"
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

FITS, st. Vitus'D Dance: N ervous Diseasesper
m%anently cured by DIR. Kllne's Great Nerve
Restorer. 81 trial bottle and treatise free.
Dr.. II. R. Kline, Id. ,931 Arch St., Phila., Pa.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

If the "innocent purchaser law
were repealed it would suddenly edu-
cate a lot Of men who now profess
ignorance.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

A lot Of people doubt the efficacy OF
prayer because they only try it when
thew feel like asking for something
thew want. Those who ask for what
thew need seldom express any doubts.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

Lawyers never quarrel over the es.
tate Of a man who leaves nothing
but a good name.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

A son always feels younger after
visiting with the cold folks"
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

Speaking Of "brain storms is
your wife showing symptoms Of the
spring house-cleaning feverq
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

Are x ou
VIII not nave 1t Cureds Send at once letter
or postal, with your address and p incfpai facts'
We will mail trial II eatment, without cost to you,
that viii give imm diate relief from the effects o;
cumbersome and dangerous trusses. We also send
our free book on the "Cause, Care and Cure OF
Rupture" This explains how you may be En-
tirely Cured by small cost By tn,
Hernia Healer Co., 40 W. =, Erie, "a.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

A man wastes time if he gives al
of it to watching his enemies.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

Itch cured in 30 minutes by Woolford's
Sanitary Lotion. Never fails. Atdruggists.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09

How annoying it is to have any
body else's child cry at the theatre,
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09
TEN A OF PAIN.
Unable to Do Even Homework Be-
cause of Kidney Troubles

Mrs. Margaret Emmerich, Of Clin-
ton St., Napoleon, O., says: "For
fifteen a I was a great sufferer
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-05-09
uow's This?

The pasture is always richer on
the far side Of the fence.
The daily sentinel., 1907-10-04
THE BAPTISTS CLOSE
SUCCESSFUL ASSOCIATION

There is no question but what the
twenty-third annual celebration OF
the Gunnison Valley Baptist Associ-
alton, which completed its sessions
in this city last night, was one OF
the most enjoyable and successful
celebrations the large organization
has ever held.
In the presence of a large audi
ence the concluding program was
carried out last evening.
The several sessions yesterday
were largely attended and proved
very helpful and entertaining dis
cussions. Some very strong men were
present from various points on the
western slope to take part in the
sessions. ~.
Rev. ]. NJ. p. Martin of this CITY
the moderator of the association
presided with dignity and fairness
and he was honored with re-elec-
tion to the highest Office in the GIT
of the association. TIT
MANY of the delegates and minis
tors left for their homes last night
each and every one speaking enthus-
iasticaliy of the meeting and the nos
nitality of the Grand Junction peo-
Ule.