The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1907-04-11


Ever try an automobile. Judger'
said a friend NO" replied the judge /;
but I've tried a lot Of people who
have"-Yonkers Statesman.
He-She married a worthless noble
man She-How did that happen
e-Des2ondency. She was fitted BY
her fathers coachmanL-Puck.
! "Sirl" exclaimed the pompous In
dividual. II am 4 self-made man" Il
accept your apology" murmured be Of
the patrician countenAnce.--Philad
phia Record
Guest (studying bill Of fare)-Wait-
er, l have fifty hellers (ten cents)
tell me what you recommend Walter
Try another observation-disclosures
Caricaturen.
Mary-I hear that the dukes mar
rage to the rich Miss Passay has been
postponed. Jane-Yes, / believe bis
creditors have granted him a little
more time.-Life.
Tom proudly Miss Pinkleigh has
promised to be my wife. Jack ICON
solingly)-Oh, don't let that worry you
Women frequently break their prom
ises--Chicago Daily News
He (bashfully May I-er-kiss
your hand, Miss Dolly7 She-Oh, I
suppose so. But it would be 30 much
easier for me to remove my veil than
my Chicago Daily News.
PoIly-Did you have a good time,
Dolly7 Dolly-Did 1 have good time!
Well, I should say did got en-
gagged seventeen times, and one Of them
is permanent-Somerville Journal.
$50 your servant girl has left you
again." said Mrs Nabor. Yes re-
piled Mrs. Sububs. What was the
matterr "She didn't like the way
did the work."-Philadelph Press.
Bacon-The police are very consid-
crate Of poor, homeless tramp In
New York Egbert- How so? Bacon
Why, when one goes to sleep on
park bench the policeman raps him up
Evening Mail
Here's something about the Dutch
stealing one OF the Philippine Islands
1 wonder what Uncle Sam will do
about it?r well, 1t would serve them
right II he refused to take 1t back
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Agent-ThIs Is the automobile you
want. You never have to crawl under
it to fix II. Sparker don't?
Agent-No. II the slightest thing goes
wrong with the mechanism, it Instant
ly turns bottom-side up.-Puck-
De Mutt don't think 1 shall ever
take part in amateur theatricals again
1 always feel as though l were making
a fool Of myself. Miss Hitts-Oh,
everybody knows 1t would be impossible
for you to do that.-Chicago Daily
News
Flo Chatting with small strangely
Your teacher is a charming young
lady. 1 suppose you love her very
much? Billy-Steady, steady! D. you
think 1 am going to tell you all about
my love affairs ALLY Sloper's Half
Holiday.
Bess-I don't like that Mr.. Cutting.
Jess-That's unkind Of you. heard
him say something awfully sweet about
you yesterday. Bess-Oh, did he?
What was It? Jessie said he imag-
med you must have been perfectly
charming as a girl.-Cleveland Leader.
well, he's a good man, an I'm
with him. said Mr.. Hennessey. Don't
We think he's right whln he wants to
put a limit on how much money
man can haveT 4 do said Mr.. Dooley,
but I'd rather put limit on how
LITTLE he can have "-Dooley's Disser-
tatIons.
II had such a beautiful dream last
night" said Mrs. Gettinrich- Il dream
ed that | had died and gone to heav-
en-" And was II anything like the |
poets and painters have pictured 1t"
"Not a bit. 1t was just like New York, |
with endless rows of theaters and |
"-Chicago Record-Herald |
"Why,y said the traveller, do you
A ttach so much attention to the dragon?
Don't you know there is no such crea-
ture?" my dear sir" answered Mr..
ii Io. the eminent Chinese phlloso-
pher. al often find the Goddess of Lib
erty depicted on your public emblems.
Yet I have found 1t impossible to meet
the lady personally. Washington
Star.
Visitor to the West Indies (who has
boo,, armed against bathing In the