Arizona republican., 1907-01-13
! LITTLE JAMES

tHow the competitive system was introduced into the management of
 the two Pacifics)
 The lntersutch Commerce Commish-
 un il says to itself. We got a Spishun
 at this here Mister Harryman. tn
 Ralerode Magnet is gittin' to be on
 most too Intimit terms with Hisself to
 be helthy fer tn Transports shun Biz
 ness of tn United Staits of which We 1 is tn Gardens. Les look into Mister Harryman's Relashuns with Hisselr
 an see if they ortn't to be Broke or Some"
 They ast Mister Harryman how many RalerOdes he owns an he said
 at he don't exactly kno fer he hadn't counted 'em fer a week or more. but
 he asts tn Interstitch Commerse Com mishun to name over a list of tn Rale-
 rodes in the United Stalts an mebbe
 he can Reckonnize some of his own among 'em.
 The Interstitch Commerse Com
 mishun they called over a lot of 'ern
 an when they came to tn Union Pas
 sific Mister Harryman he stops 'em an sez Hole on. that's wun." After
 awhile the Interstitch Commerce Cont
 mishun Reeds tn name Of tn Suthern
 Passific- That's anuthern." sez Mis-
 ter Harryman.
 How about tn Competishun on these here Througfares of Yourn ?" asts tn Interstitch Commerse Com mishun
 Tt must be Sumpin Feerse" Repliz, Mister Harryman tn way Bizness is arollin in, but you better ast Mister Stubbs fer tn Detales."
 Who's Mister Stubbs?" asts tn Com mushun.
 Hes at tn he'd of tn Competishun Department of tn Passifics" sez Mister Harryman: hes tn most Ac- complisht COmpetishun Expert in tn Country. He could'a' got up a Compe- tishun between tn Simeze Twins or tn ? heded Girl. Why, if that man Stubbs ever gets to Hevin hell start a Com petishun there 'at'll Wake up tn old Patryarks some an make 'em think at tn Eternal Life is worth Twin. "
 Tn Interstitch Commerce Commisa- un went to see Mr Stubbs in his Privit offs an found him Dictatin' instruckshuns to tn Generic Passinger Agent, of the Union Passific at Noo York to put tn fare frum Noo York to Frisco wun way. down to a dollar. Then he Dictates anuther letter to Suthern Passific Generic Passeng7r ! Agent at Moo York at he Understands 1 at tn U. r. has Redooced tn Rate to I Californy Pints to a dollar an he goes ] on to dictate as foIlers: The $. P. l Can't afford to lose no bizness on ac- i count Of tn Cut Throte Methods of tn ! C. P Make tn Rate 75 cents an 1 thro !n Kromo."
 Tn Interstitch Commerse Commish- ] un they sez to Mister Stubbs. This | looks convincfn' but is this here Inter necine War of Mister Harryman's ! Ralerodes a Everyday Occurrence 9" ! Mister Stubbs he Replize Tt Emfatic- 1 ally is" Tn Interstitch Commerce commishun asts him for Histry of this here Roonous Competishun.
 He sez, sez he: "It dates back to tn time at Mister Harryman Bot tn L.. F. in Selfe Defense an put me at tn He'd of tn COmpetishun Department Before that tn Rodes hated each oth- ern an tried to see which could Sock t to tn Public the Hardest If tn S P. made a Rate of s175.5O, frum Coast Pints to tn Atlantic Seebord tn [. r. come out tn next day with a s225.10 ate an tn s. P. had to meet it or else i'd get itself Swamped with Traffick m sitch things. Mister Harryman 'Ound at he either had to git holt of he L. P. or buy a Stepladder sos to put up Rates higher. As soon as we got holt of it l inoggyrated my Compe- ishUn Systum. That's tn only way to 'un two Ralerodes; give 'em lots of Competishun's tn life ,f Bizness. Yours Truly. J. (. | Stubbs." LITTLE JAMES.