Albuquerque evening citizen., 1907-05-30

bellboy awed and the butler subdued.
The most expensive husband a wo-
man ever purchased is worth the
price, even If he does nothing but
show himself occasionally at dinner
or appears with her in public now
and then"
YES" sighed Kitty, thoroughly
beaten, ''even a dead husband gives
widow some sort of advantage over
an old maid"
"And the more husbands you have
had" | added, the more fashionable
and impressive you are. Mrs. Smith
Green-Jenkins-Jon for instance
stands twice the chance of becoming
a leader in the smart set than poor
plain Mrs. Robinson stands. A coll
lection of names adds as much luster
to woman as a string of Carnegie
medals. They are SO many feathers
in her cap, so many signs of attain
ment; and like diamonds at the OPP
era or the horse show, their quality
doesn't count half so much as their
quantity"
But they are terrible response
bility!" put in Kitty.
"What-the names?"
mo. The husbands" corrected
Kitty. Especially the wooden ones"
Come" L said, at last conquered
by curiosity. tell me what you mean
by a wooden husband"
THE kind" explained Kitty, "that
are just made to look at and who
never have a thought or an emotion
or an inspiration or an original idea
beyond something new for dinner
The kind who respond to your most
ferVid outbursts and your most elo-
quent speeches with a yawn or an
'Ummm, and who spend the day
looking forward to supper and the
night dreaming Of breakfast"
But" | protested, aren't they bet
ter than the iron kind. who are en-
crossed in their own importanc,
and who imagine that a home is q
small Turkish empire in which the!
are sultans by divine right; and whC
dictate to you about your frocks and
insist on selecting your hats and pay
ing all the bills and going over your
accounts and giving orders to the
| cook and"
Yes" agreed Kitty, "and they're
better than the mushy kind who car
write poetry but who can't write Z
check, and the putty kind whC
/ haven't the backbone to face th'
Janitor when he is in a rage, and th'
| brassy kind, who spend their tint
ogling other women and their none!
/ on horse races"
Exactly l agreed triumphantly
"A wooden man may not be very re
| sponsive at home, but at least yol
can be sure that he isn't too respon
sive abroad And he may not go ou
of his way to do anything brilliant
/ but at least he will not get in hi
wife's way
"And that's why" cried Kitty witt
sudden inspiration, $50 many bril-
liant women are married to woodeI
husbands"
Yes" I sighed, "the poor thing
! never get a chance
Il mean" corrected Kitty, "tha
such a mans very inertia sort o
do the thinking and acting and work
ing for two"
'It's always so in double harness
| announced.
And l suppose it's easier" addeD
Kitty thOughtfully, ito work out
good design i'm wood than it is Il
iron or mush."
"Oh, yes!" l agreed with alacrity
Look at me for instance"
"You?" Kitty glanced up indif
ferently, Il don't see anything
she began.
NO" / said, but you might eve
do something cOmmendable with m
if you had any-any designs"
Il beg your pardon. Mr. Curtis
Il mean explained humbly
that even l might be made to Sc
something i'm a lettuce patch-be
sides salad
Kitty booked skeptically and De
came eugrossed iu the adjustment ID
her chiffon streamers.
Yes 1 ayerred, "aud somethiu
tn love Ga a cottage, besides--"
Economy" inquired kitty quiel
Iy
Perhaps" she added shaking he
mead doubtfully "but you could neye
be made TO see anything iu a con
versatlon but am argument and am.
thing iu am argument but your ow
side"
''Nor anything I'm life / adde0
"but--Oh. Kitty" ! broke out SUD
denly, pointing with my whip, "iu.
look al that, Isn't it great"
"What?" said Kitty trying 90 q
view OF the landscape through he
streamers,
Don't you sea it?" l cried ~
proaehfully.
81 don't see anything but an ol
tree returned Kitty witheringl!