The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1907-02-02
Fut-RuIe."

Policeman Barney Flynn was griev-
ously troubled by youth of the name
of Horatio Mann. Horatio was we'll
meaning young fellow, but he had err
roneous ideas. He had read dime
novels until he had become imbued
with the idea that detective is the
greatest of created beings, and 1t was
his ambition to be one. Hence his adj
miration for Flynn. He had heard
stories of the policeman's prowess, and
he haunted him. He wanted to know
all about his methods and his exploits,
and iuore than all else he wanted the
policeman to get him position on the
force or with some detective agency.
81 know I'm just made for detec-
tive" he said frequently. "All my in
clinations lie in that direction, and
revel in mystery"
It will be seen from this that Horatio
spoke reasonably correct English. In
deed, he had had fair education, the
only trouble being that it had not
worked in" However, as Policeman
Flynn once remarked, "a ma-an can
get book-l'arnin' amy time iv his life,
but t is not with sinse, f'r sinse 60
be a nach'ral gift" Horatio had the
book-learning, but he lacked the
sense, and this 1t was that made him
90 annoying to the policeman. He
could not be persuaded that the life
of q detective was not one long ro-
nance, filled with DISCUSSES, thrilling
adventures and fabulous rewards. He
would make himself up in the most
wonderful and outlandish way. and
then drop In ON Flynn to ask II that
would not fool the cleverest "crook."
Later he amused himself by shadow
ing people in the neighborhood, and
writing out reports of his work
which he submitted to Flynn for APP
proval or criticism.
Eye wa-ant me f'r to help ye to be a
daytictive?" said Policeman Flynn to
him one day. "M-m-m, welr'-draw-
ing his hand over his chin In the old
familiar way-"I'll tell We what I'll dc
rr We. I'll give ye tn polls ixamina-
ton an see how We come out T Is not
ye-er pla-an fr to star-art In as a
spathrolman, Nv coorse?"
"Oh, no." answered the youth. 81
feel that my talents are above that"
ct is what I supposed" said Po-
liceman Flynn. 9TH woods is full iy
ia-ads like you. Someiv thin wa-ants
to be prisidint Nv a r-railroad, some iy
thin wa-ants to be editor Nv a news
pa-aper, some Nv thin wa-ants to be
gin'ral manager Nv amy OIL business
that's big enough, but most iv then
wa-ants to be day-tictives. Amy way
We put it, they can do betther than tn
feliies that's dom tn work. now
But t is a shtrange thing to me tha
tn min that's maxim na-ames FIR thin
silves at tn top is niver tn vans tina
sta-arted in up there. Did We ivel
think iv that?"
moo, can't say that did," replied
the youth.
CIV coorse not" said Policeman
Flynn, "an' ye w'u'd MT think tn
r-rule was fr We II We did. II is no
NECESSARY in ye-er ca-ase. Ye're to-
smart. Well, mebbe so. Wen thr,
1t on. livery la-ad that wants to be
day-tictive has to be Examined, an II
put few QUESTIONS to We. Suppose y
was In fcha-arge Nv tn day-tictiv
work. an big burglary was com
mitted. what w'u'd We do?"
'T'd look for a clue" answere,
Horatio, promptly and confidently.
II can see We dom it," asserted Pc
iiceman Flynn with chuckle. Il cal
see We goin' through tn pla-ace, an
lookin' wise, an gettin' down on ye-e
knees f'r to Examine a bit Nv mu
through a magnifyin' glass, an thi
goin out an measurin' tn thracks il
tn mud with a fut-rule. can hea
ye saying, This great crime wa
committed be ma-an with large fu
an a nail shtickin' out iv wan shoe
IT is only nicissary now f'r to find til
shoe an artist tn ma-an. Ohio! ye'
ma-ake a great day-tictive. FIR sure.
els not that what you'd do?" aske
Horatio.
I'm net ta-alkin' iv what I'd do,
returned Policeman Flynn. "I'I
ta-alkin' iv what tn great day-tic
tive does. II We was r-real day-tiC
tive an had this work. FIR to do, ye'
go to tn pla-ace an LUX wise, an thi
We d go back an ordher tn dhrag-ne
put out livery ma-an that c'u'd ha-ay
done 1t al lots that c'u'd mt w'u'd b
brought in an"
"Arrested?" interrupted Horatio.
"F"r sure" replied Policeman Flynn
"But what right would you have
arrest people against whom you had n
cvidence?''
Who's ta-alkin' " rights?" -etorte
policeman Flynn Urn ta-alkin Nv Z