Forest City press. (Forest City, Potter County, D.T. [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1907-08-22

ATcHisoN GLOBE SIGHTS.

You hear of a good many a
through the divorce courts.
A woman can look pleased When she
Is not. but a man can't do 1t.
You never hear of rOubled
with insomnia early in the morning.
A western man never thinks much Of,
an easterner's ability to ride q horse.
The average armer's wife hasn't q
very good opinion of creamery butter.
When ar ugly man L. u favcrite with
the ladies. how the handsome men fuss!
Among q thousand men. there are
only two or three who are really cad
ers.
SO many people consider a wish an
compliment to be called "a nice little
man."
You soon become very tired OF the
good person who takes an interest"
in you.
Here lately people do not regard a
guarantee as more valuable than a
promise. ,
' The citizens Of every lead town
claim 1t was sold out" by a railroad
company. :
A Plain Drunk is the nearest ap-
proach some men can make to the
Simple Life. y
Some men remember a v this
way Where they got 1t when they
The man who drinks to assert his
rights has a peculiar notion OF per-
sonal liberty.
Some men are mean enough to tell
their wives how we'll things are cooked
at "A restaurant.
To a man with a little sense. prob
ably the greatest annoyance in the
world Is n fool. ,
The man with a big fish story has
earnest competition in the mar whose
dreams come true.
The man who always has a
scheme" on tap never seems to be
much OF a success.
The only time you hear OF some peo-
pie Is when they begin doctoring for
some new ailment.
If you think an occasional "skinning''
does your friends good. 1t is n sign you
are fond of gossip.
They say IA woman can't keep a Sc
lcret. Ever try to learn a WOman's age
by direct questioning?
Hope is something as useless as
worry, but the hopeful man feels bet
ter II a he who worries.
The man who "rolls' his own cigaret
will always tell you how injurious the
manufactured article Is.
According to their own stories. some
men spend most of their time turning
down offers OF good jobs.
II you are not quite certain as to
chances are against YOU.
Fol- every man who works. there are
three or four who bother him by trying
to sell him something.
Ther are no songs or orations about
her. u the hen has done more for
the country than the eagle ever will.
Nearly every farmer living close to
n town at some time thinks Of getting
rich by laying out a burying ground.
1t is a real shy mans secret belief
that nothing worse can happen a man
than to have q baby left on his porch.
When a man prides himself upon al
ways being perfectly just o may de-
pend upon 1t others do not think HI is.
What good excuse Is there for peo-
pie labelling themselves because there
has recently been a death in h
family.
After all the only sure happiness we
have today Is the knowledge that we
don't know what Is going to happen to.
morrow.
Summer is also the time the girl
with n voice" keeps the tired neigh
'bors awake by her efforts to sing them
to sleep.
Learn the particular style of beauty
a man admires and o have a fair
description Of the last to fas-
climate him.
Our idea OF a perfect gentleman ID
a grocer, h hen q faster steals q
piece OF cheese. gives him a cracker
to eat with 1t.
home he new fails to speak. in his
letters. OF the evenings he has spent in
his room studying.
II you don't laugh at a mans Joke.
he avs you " no sense Of humor:
1t new occurs to him that he lacks
h n Of humor.
Practice sometimes makes perfect.
Fol instance. It makes q perfect bear
of the man who has to hear a good
deal of Il on h piano.
An Atkinson man has a new way of
telling a fish story. Il caught 30 many
fish when a boy he says, that I do
not care for them aow."
Every town thinks with scorn
that II h were : farmers wife. she
would like to see the man who could
9nnke her do the milking. 7
When q PM cleans out a bureau
drawer h leaves the drawer as full
az before beginning. and throws out
enough junk to MI It again.
and think they haven't much to cry
about. but old people only cry when
they can no longer keep from It.
Nothing malkes q man quite 30 mad
a. to be put to sleep In q bed that has
ed before It 10 ready to deep In.
The loafer will always tell you there
this town." stu. thers are twenty
four hours In . day here. - elsewhere.
'sight: what do you think Of parents
who have 0utlived all their children?
Isn't that . sight with msre grief in
A boy can think OF many reasons
why he would like to be grown up,V
but when company comes Ae foreeta
them al but waiting for tls second
II H. about - hard for . widow TO
:reconcile No. Is hin to her eocond
marriage ~ Il 10 Q widower TO con-
vince hts children they nseA Z new
& the average man has am Know