Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1907-10-25
JUST LIKE A MAN.

! y
night? You see, I've had to let the serv-
ant go on a holiday for a day or two,
and they want me desperately at the
Woman's Aid and Relief bazaar this even
ing. 1t is the last day. If you thought
you could manage by yourself"
III try to survive it." observed Mr.
Meek, d-naturedly. Il don't fancy it
will prove fatal"
I'll get a joint and cook it this morn
ing then,' went on Mrs. Meek, cheerfully,
and you can have it cold for dinner
Thank you!" replied Mr. Meek. you'll
! do nothing of the kind. fancy [ haven't
gone camping out with the Volunteers
every year for nothing [ suspect l can
| prepare a hot dinner as we'll as most
women"
| Thus it came about that Mrs Meek
abandoned all idea of preparing Mr..
Meel's dinner for him and betook herself
to the bazaar. So it resulted, further
more. that Mr.. Meek left his office about
t o'clock that afternoon and proceeded
to collect on his way home the necessary
supplies for a dainty little dinner.
An alluring display of geese was the
first thing to catch his eye, and he was
| Just on the point of securing one of them,
when, by good luck, or more probably
through the natural sagacity of the man,
he rccollected that as a rule, you don't
cook geese just as they are. In the mo-
mentary reaction that followed this feat
of memory he bought a couple of mutton
chops and three tomatoes.
III have a good oldfashioned, English
! dinner" he thought. by Jove!" he ex-
claimed, a moment later. I'll have some
oyster soup to begin WITH and apple pud
| ding to tinish.'
! He was so ticEled with this idea that
he promptly rushed into a green grocers
and purchased half peck of their best
eating apples, and then hurried home,
pausing to order some oysters on the
| way.
By 5 o'clock he had the fire going
| beautifully. By o'clock he was just be-
ginning to enjoy the thing. The toma-
toes were stewed divinely; the potatoes
were boiling to their hearts content, and
the milk for the oyster soup was SIM
mering contentedly on the back of the
stove. The oysters had not yet arrived.
Dear mel" thought the ambitious gen.
tleman. Il wish [ had thought of it in
! time and I'd have some oyster patties
for a sort of grand finale. Halo, what's
this? By thunder, if that woman hasn't
left me some cold ham and a custard pie?
| BY Jove! for twopence I'd throw the
whole lot out into the back yard"
At half-past he puts the chops in to
broil. ''as in the good old days of yore"-
this poetic allu sion to the style of cook
inc being occasioned by one of them acct
dentally dropping into the fire, whence
he rescued it with great presence OF mind
by the Joint assistance of the poker and
one of the best table napkins
BY the time the chop was thus res
cued. both it and the table napkin were
fairly well done-to put it mildly. This
difficulty he got over by putting the
erring chop on the window sill to cool,
and the napkin into the fire-to do the
other thing.
This accomplished, and with one chop
gently cooking on the gridiron and the
other cooling on the window sill, he
started to construct the paste for his
apple pudding. This proved most tas.
chatting. He placed a large quantity OF
flour in a small bowl emptled Jug
of water on top of it, and proceeded to
mold it deity into shape, as he had
often seen his wife do. The flour ana
water promptly forsook the bowl and be-
! took themselves to his hands. Then the
milk for the soup began to burn gust as
the potatoes boiled dry. He rushed to
the rescue, and left the greater portion
of paste fairly evenly divided between
the handles of the two saucepans ana
the poker. At this iuncture the toma-
toes started to see if they couldn't sur
pass he milk in burning. They succeed
! ed. The cat. which was accustomed to
| ,,ff tho pbOn
! tha window sill, while the chop on the
fire grew beautifully black on the down
side" So many things were now burn
ing at the same time that MI Meek
gave up hope of trying to discover just
which one was burning most.
"Tet the blessed things burn I'LL
they're sick of it, was the extremely
broad minded way in which he summed
nm tho situation. With the astuteness
thot characterized him as distinguished
| from his fellow men, he gave up all Ell
fort TO track the truant paste, ana SIM
NV popped rus apples into the oven to
| cake.
| # was now about half-past Z. and the
FIRE was getting hotter than anything
else on earth. except, perhaps, Mr. Meek;
To turned all the hampers, opened all
+bo doors and took off all the lids Inns
rcsuIted most satisfactorily. The hre
bcgan to cool. 1t got, if anything, lit lit;
41e low. Then it went out. Mr.. Meek
r,sbed for some fire lighters and near
" took his heaG. off on a clothesline
The geptlest Of natures when aroused ed
ORC often the most terrible. lie used up
enough fre-Iighter and parafftine to haze I've
ignited the PyE"n,jddS o OF E 9oEed and md
Stamped and showed, ana ~, P0t t;g e %nu
+h ha1 cat-and it had had its dinner-was
5 5he ts with him, and departed to the
a anier kitchen to try the oysters which
ed ed on the table without waiting to par
lev with Mr.. Meek .o- ,,+or Mr.
When. about five minutes b later fo, me
Meek discovered that the cat n'o Ao''i'0