The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-01-28

. we WEI 10 announce IN this Tissue
tnat Jim Hellsos editor and proprietor
OF The Kicker, mayor of the town of
the Gulch and otherwise boss of the
earth, Is snow-bound somewhere in
the mountains, and it has devsDLved
upon US to get the paper out this
week.
We are the editor of the Horse De-
partment, and have been hanging on
for the last six months at SO per We
are the Dissat isfied Horse editor We
are the Horse editor who has been
laying for chance to get even with
the meanest man in the business.
We are the Horse editor who came
on here from the East to write about
horses and draw a salary of $40 per
week. Not one horse have we written
about. We have kept busy clipping out
murder items and saving wood for
the office stove, and we have never
seen above So in our weekly wad.
Some Horse editors might go on
filling this mental position and draw.
ing these starvation wages, but we are
not that kind of hair-pin We shall
gobble enough money to square our
salary and light out for other fields,
and Mr.. Jim Hellso can go hang. He
is under snow ten feet deep, and be-
fore he can dig his way out we shall
be far away.
For the last year the editor of this
sheet has been claiming a circulation
of billion copies per week. and stat
ing that it took eighty rotary presses to
work off the editions. The bona fde
circulation is about 1.40O copies. and
the weekly issues are worked off on
one shacklety old press that runs by
by a crank.
Not a single copy of The Kicker is
sent to Russia, Persia, Arabia or
A T1IJ@ +, -o1o 20,
have thousands of subscribers in those
countries. When lie says he is in re-
ceipt of letters from the Dey of Algiers
set him down as a monstrous liar.
There have been good many state
ments in this sdishrag about editors
private graveyard and his eighteen vic
tins buried there. The truth of the
matter is that Hellso only owns one
vacant lot, and that is a frog-pond. and
a dead mule represents the eighteen
characters he claims to have planted.
Beware of any further statements he
may make about this graveyard.
One would think. from reading He'll
SOS statements that he had driven
about forty quack doctors and shyster
lawyers out of this town at the muzzle
of a gun. We are the Truthful Horse
editor and we defy any one to find
single instance to support this brag-
gadocio. Hellso never bluffs anybody
unless II Is d HAL NS Ing "a SOAASuulP-
ton.
We are. the Horse editor who has
suffered. In broiling heat and freezing
cold we have had to saw wood at the
rear door of the Kicker office and then
take half our weekly salary in store
orders. When we come to think about
it we are amazed that the worm did
not turn long ago.
We are the Horse editor who has
had to lie for Jim Hellso since the first
day we entered the Office. Whenever
a man appeared who seemed to have
shoot in his eye, we have lied to him
by saying that the editor was out of
town. In the six months We have told
two hundred lies and saved Hel1so' S life
a hundred times. If he had even given
us ten cents lie it would have made
difference in our feelings towards him.
but never a dime nor word of en-
courag cement
The Kicker has never had a political
policy. As the aggrieved Horse edit
or in charge we hereby announce that