davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1907-02-07
Muldoon'S Chapters
on Romance
CHAPTER I.

wall dV Culm OPPIlSolV0 Ooyo
whin bactayrial germs av
madniss fly round the at
mosphere; whin strong min short
change aich other an the ristliss-
Miss av the GROWER becomes acute.
IF the reader will kindly displace
himsilf fer a momint be imaginin'
he is lukin' thru a tillyscope from
the dome av Montgomery Wards
he will be surprised.
Yis, he will think the ice Minis
union is on parade or ilse hanarin'
the CORPSE av a fillow mimber,
nayther av which wud be troo.
From Wilson Avynoo to Ninety
eighth, from Wabash to Naper-
vile, the PERSPECTIVE is filed, in
tirely, wild ice wagins an their
ACCESSORIES. Trooly, no more amaz-
in SPECTACLE has liver been wit
missed since the pageants av Nayro
while fer gracefulniss in action
such as turnin' corners or backin'
feminist turkish bath parlors the
naval review pales into obscurity.
The terrific hate av this day, to-
either wild the congisted traffic,
has been the names av commincin'
our narytive, which is not widout
it's tinge av sadniss.
In a nayborin' windy the hands
av a bargain sales clock-marked
down from five to foor ninety
siven-point magistically to the
hour av five p. m. That it's pulsa-
tons are REASONABLY corrict is
matayrially substantiated be the
complicated aroomas av free loonch
that, at this time livery day, con-
fine their sole Efforts to the drillin
av private sooer systim in the
poll tax payers right av way.
Standin' aginst the stairway av
the illyvated kit on State St., Bill
Kerrigan, hot spoort from Kan
kakay, is intillygintly jinglin'
handful av United States boolyun.
The imperturbability av his
sawn.fraw suggests that he has
been there befoor, while iverythin'
ilse indyoates that mintal prob
linn, too dape fer PERCEPTION, is
strugglin' amoong his inmost
vltals.
Apparently, it is matter az life
an dith, fer livery now an thin he
chances from free loonoh sign to
wan av Dilmonioo's subtersyneans
an thin back to the loonch agin.
He ivydintly practices ayconomy.
While strooglin' wild his indysiz-
hun a couple av private ditiotives,
prowlin' fer innocint prey, go
meanderin' past. The dinseniss
av the throng makes it impossible
to till whittier jostlin' contacts are
rale or artificial, anyway whin the
slooths emerge wan av thin has
secured q siction av Bills smock
frock while the other continded
hissilf wild lock av hair. It will
be ridyly surmised that our hayro
has been frisked, so in kapin' wild
literary inchantmints av this kind
we will lit the mystery dapen be
closin' the chapter.
CHAPTER II.
The inflow rays ay full moon,
occasionally obscured be the spas
| NJ odio no ccoooc on froct hittnn
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1907-02-07


n tory of the pose. Most of
those unenlightened ro-
mancers who are called historians
have failed TO observe this fact or
ifthey have observed it have not
dared to give it due prominence.
This again is due to the fact that
historians themselves have ever
proved the worst of all boseuys.
Who does not know them-Herod-
otus posing as a painstaking OBJ
server, with half an eye on the
subject of. his history ( save the
markD and one and a half on
posterity? Tacitus, again, as a
severe moralist, careful to assure
us that the scandal with which he
regales us serves merely as an aw-
ful warning. Then there is Glib
bon, the pompous, playing pretty
successfully at omniscence and
Froude, the Inaccurate, at impair
TALLY.
Small wonder that the charac-
tiers and actions Of the men that
are gone have rose colored veil
of Walter Scottish romance thrown
over them and that expression
"steeped in the mists Of antiquity"
has an excuse for existence. Your
modern historian feels this and
endeavors to worm out of the diff
6culty by given us histories of the
people, thereby without any ex-
cuse making history absolutely
uninteresting. For it is evident
that if history were a mere affair
Of habeas corpus acts and fiscal
systems, it would leave but stale
taste in the mouth and a headache.
I defy the most entertaining his
torian to make much copy out OF
events without dragging in a per-
sonality here and there.
Some Of the most delightful poses
have been adopted by gentlemen
who lived before the erasof press
agents. Take Caesar, for instance.
It seems trife unfair, perhaps,
to- drag poor Julius into the argu-
ment, for ever since Froude gave
him that little puff, various small
or, but more impartial, critics have
been tearing him to pieces and G.
B. Shaw's latest play fairly robs
him Of about all he had left-his
dignity. That was his pose. o.
serve the great conqueror return
ing from the subjugation of his
country's land incidently, his own)
foes. Does he accept the crown
rendered him by more or less
grateful people? No, sir; he just
arranges a little demonstration
and at the proper moment strikes
an attitude and says "Take away
that bauble" or words ito that
effect. Caesar, also, like some
other historical character, made a
big hit by getting martyred.
There is strong suspicion in my
mind that, having been bothered
by govt or appendicitis, he ar
ranged the whole conspiracy him
self, including his last words.
Cesar was not the only buffer
of his time, however. There was
Cicero, who, however, in spite OF
the fine press-agent business of
Catiline's conspiracy, was a little
too much of coward to carry
things thru. Then there was
Mark Anthony, who affected the
iurid, and Crassus, the Napoleon
of finance" of the age.
So it goes thru the ages. Char
lemagne, very much the Magne;
Harold of England, playing at be-
ing the last of the Saxons; Wolsey
posing as patriot; Charles II. as
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1907-02-07

Cu uIuCu lutO dCtlVlty OO d Lag AdH
lake braze, filtered hither an
yonder, but the slapin' foorm av
the young man stirred not; nay
Their did he move. In the wistern
canopy av the horizon Thirteenth
bank av clouds waz gatherin', an,
be the same token the operate
stragglers round the monkey
akwayrian convinced to git an
INCENTIVE to scatter thimsilves.
An overture av thunder, follied be
rain wather awncore, convinced
the most skiptical that their opin-
ions Nv blow-over storms wud be a
deloosion an wit wan in this
case, so they also ran fer sshilter.
Wild the ixciption av a Wild
eyed faymale, payrin' over the
railin' av the worruld's fair bridge,
Bill Kerrigan, the illyfant, an
pathrolman Oroork, who waz kap-
in an eye -on all three. no other
payple wur visyble, whin the rale
furry broke loose. The 1nsoo1n'
hour battles description. Electric
al phaynomeny sizzled an snapped
in simultayneous harmony wild the
vaults av hiven which seemed to
split in twain, literally flushin' the
impurities off av Cook County's
Exposed surface. In the name
time foor tragic denoomawns rap
idly developed aich other, to wit:
Oroork crawled behint the snake
bin to intertain himsilf wild Nick
Carter. Duchiss, the illyfant,
pulled up her stake an attimpted
to swim to Milwaukee.
Later devilopmints ascertained
that she collided wild a whale
back PASSENGER boat which waz
half way over on its way back.
The faymale, in joompin' off the
bridge, caught her pittycoat on a
nail, hangin' there all night as a
ritybutlve consequence. Bill Ker-
rigan, our hayro, waz blown off the
binch be the first strong gust, but
it revived him not, provin' that
ayven the illymints are puny COM
pared wild the anesthitic proper
ties av free loonch.
CHAPTER III.
This chapter will be conclooded
wild hid-lines taken from siveral
mornin' papers fer which no apol-
ogies are doc as I had to corrict
the grammar: policeman Oroork,
afther an all night chase, captures
a desperate anarchist who might
be evadin' the law yit had he not
been struck belightnin'." "Detict-
ives Blink an Blank av the Blink
erton agincy how woven a con-
elusive web around the culprit,
an accordin' to their ivydince he
is the same crimynal who swiped
the illyfant."
''The midycal profession is in
tinsely ixcited over the dith az an
alleged anarchist; it bein' the GIN
eral opinion that he waz struck
wild lightnin', tho few are in
clined to behave he waz kicked be
the packyderm. Agnes Black,
who waz found hangin' in an in
verted position from the railin' av
the high bridge is held as an &C.
complete, on the instance av de-
tictive Blank who asserts that she
is committin' oontimpt av coort
wild her prolonged silince."
Sensational Developments in the
raycint illyfant case may lade to
sayrious complications fer the
city, as the defendant regained
CONSCIOUSNESS while the coroner
waz in the act av post moortimin'
his coorpse. It is behaved, how
iver that the CITY surgeon will
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1907-02-07


lights being introduced. am en-
abled to form a just idea of it's
exact shape and color, and can
distinguish it from other fruit
4 see it distinctly.
Aversion- Anhbatly.
Avexsson is turning from; an
h.bat1ky is feeling against. An
antipathy is not so strong as an
aversion. The former is state of
feeling; the latter is a mental act.
There is more Of reason in aver
sion, and more of impulse in an
tigathy. It is something in our
own nature which causes our aver
sion. 1t is something in the ma
ture of others which produces our
antipathy. Antipathy is opposed
to sympathy; aversion is opposed
to inclination. Many persons feel
antipathies to worms, mice, insects,
etc. The idle have no aversion
from work. We should epdeavor
to overcome antipathies, and re-
slst aversions.
Extevz0r-ExternaI
That which is outside, but yet
forms part of a substance, is it's
exterior: What is contiguous to
the exterior is external. The skin
of nut is its exterior, and the shell
it's external covering. The exte-
rior of house is what we see of
the house itself from without;
such as the brick walls, ornaments,
color, etc. The external parts OF
a house refer to the garden, sta
bles, Offices, etc., by which it Is
surrounded. Morally speaking, a
mans exterior is the visible ex-
preston of his mind within, and
has reference to his countenance
and manners. One who is partlc-
ular in the arrangement of his
dress, house, furniture, pictures,
etc., pays much attention to ex-
ternals.
Fyuil-B,zlzle.
Substances which are apt to
break are 1Sas1;; those which are
apt, in breaking, to split in many
irregular particles, are brittle. The
form or shape of an object may
make it frail, tho the material of
which tits constructed be not brittle.
Brittle is quality essential to the
nature of certain materials; frail
is applied to those which are put
together, or formed in such way
as to be easily broken. A reed, or
hastily constructed house, is
frail; glass, coal, shells, etc., are
brittle. What is frail snaps; what
is brittle breaks into many parts
by collision. Frail is used in
secondary sense, as applied to the
moral weakness of human beings.
Brittle is scarcely ever so used.
Repenkanee- C0nnTtson.
C0ntv1hon is that state of mind
into which we bring ourselves by
continued repentance; in which
the heart is, as it we're, bruised at
the remembrance of sin. Repent
anee is more active term, and
simply expresses lively sorrow for
past offenses. Repentance is felt
not only for sin, but also for ao-
tons which may influence our
worldly affairs or condition. The
motives for contrition are always
religious. Sorrow for having of
Tended God produces contrition.
The reflection that we have done
wrong in any way produces re-
pentance. The heart is contrite
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1907-02-07
CHAPTER II.

The. inflow rays az a full moon,
occasionally obscured be the spas
modic passages av frost bitten
clouds, ,shone TRANQUILITY on the
New-York tribune., 1907-11-17
Make Your Home Artistic

by decorating each room with Alabastine
in perfect color harmony with its furnish
ings Alabastine comes in dry powdered
form, and when mixed with cold water
anyone can easily apply it to any surface.
1t hardens and sets to the wall, becoming
part of it, and will neither rub nor
wear off, nor fade.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1907-04-11
DIR. :" WALLACH
IS CONVICTED
Mercy Is Recommended New
Formula of Cure---0live
Oil and Tar.

J. Lor Wallach, the female rocks
leprologist, was convicted of perjury
yesterday afternoon for false swearing
to his place of residence in registering
as a voter for last election. A recom-
nlenxlation to mercy was tackled upon
the verdict, which had taken the jury
three hours and forty-eight minutes to
find.
The jury consisted of John Duncan,
James r. Pearce, A. d. Bolster, G. r.
Moore, Chas. A. Simpson, Hiram Kolo-
moku, Joseph Morse, Jas. r. Arcia, E.
Erickson, F. II. Armstrong, James
Steiner and A. f. Cooke.
w c. Achi for defendant noted ex~
ceptions to the verdict with notice OF
motion for a new trial. Sentence was
set for Saturday morning at o'clock.
A few minutes before the jury re-
turned it's verdict, the court being In
recess at the time, Mr.. Achi said to
Judge De Bolt that he was surprised
the jury naQ not DTOuSnI III d NOIuASe
of acquittaI in five minutes, as if he
had written the entire charge of the
court himself he could not have made
it more favorable to the defendant.
waIlach, at the trial, gave out an
entirely new formula of his cure for
Ieprosy. 1t is a simple one withal.
There are no female rocks in it, nor
yet worms from near Bombay. The
ingredients he now stated to be olive
oil and tar.
He had testified that he took lodg-
ings at Klemme's place, corner OF
Queen and Richards streets, because
the fumes of his cooking medicine at
Victorino VasconcelIes' place, Miller
street, impaired such a pungent odor
to his room there that he could not
sleep in it,
Asked what the materials were which
were so odoriferous he declined to
answer, saying, You want to hnd out
my secret" The court ordered him
to answer the question and he said ii
was olive oil and tar that he boiled
| together.
CONTINUED on Page Four)
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1907-04-11
RUSSIAN GRAND DUKE
THREATENED BY ASSASSlNS
ST PETERSBURG April IAttempts upon the LIE OF tho
Grand Duke Nicholaievitch been frustrated. o
AFTERNOON CABLE REPORT.

RISBEE Arizona April ro.-Over six hundred miners nave
gone out on strike in recognition OF the union
WASHINGTON April 1o-President Roosevelt has appointed
Rnh Tv negro auditor treasury for the Navy Depart
BAKERSFIELD April Io-Two locomotives on diferent
ons Of the Southern Pacific exploded today Four men
were killed.
CINCINNATI April Io-Ncholas Longworth, who married
Mice Alice Roosevelt daughter President has declared that
Secretary of War William H. TAFT VIII succeed F00SeVe' ~ ~
SAN FRANCISCO April oThe Supreme Court OF the State
decided that with exorton and IN
o NAV be permitted attorneys and others outside
oft the guards watch him.
NEW YORK April Io-Dsrict Attorney Jerome has con-
,dd his argument the trial OF Harry X
Thaw for the murder of Stanford White
Justice Fitzgerald today charged the jury and the case mas oe
submitted to twelve.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1907-04-11
UNIVERSITY CLUB CHARTER.

An application for charter for the
University Club. 10 enable it 70 ac-
ouire and possess real property, has
been filed in the Treasurer 5 office by
the board Of governors. consisting Of
Alfred :. Hartwell, Alonzo Gartley,
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1907-04-11

Trans-Paclhc Trade today gives de-
tails Of the exports of sugar from al
ports OF the Territory Tor March,
eboving a total of s9.es2 tons.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1907-04-11
NEW CHINESE NAVY.

SHANGHAI April 1.-THE scheme reorganize the Chinese
navy involves appropriation of taels for the eonstue
ton o. cruisers, torpedo boats and submarines.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1907-04-11
CUBA MAY HAVE ELECTIONS.

HAVANA April ISecretary Taft has sailed for Porto Rico
He quoted that tranquility continues to prevail IN Cuba
national election may be held in nine months
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1907-04-11
FOR BONDED
WAREHOUSES;
important Local Question Is
Raised by the Island
Sugar Interest.

The regular monthly meeting of the
Chamber of Commerce was held Tues
day evening with w. NJ. Giffard, E. d.
Tenney, VIM. Pfotenhauer, E. I. Spald-
ing. G. w. Smith, f. M. Swanzy and FL.
P. Wood present. The regular monthly
report Of the secretary and treasurer
were read and ordered filed. A large
amount of correspondence was read
amongst which was the following COM
munication from the Honolulu Suger
Planters Association:
Honolulu, T. H.. March Is, 1907.
Mr. w. M. Giffard, President, Cham
Der of Commerce, Honolulu.
Dear Sir: I am directed by the
trustees of the Hawaiian Sugar Plan
ters' Association to refer to you letter
received from Mr.. F. NJ Hatch, dated
Washington, February %, 1907, in ref
erence to establishing bonded ware
houses in Honolulu. A copy Of said
letter is enclosed herewith.
The trustees of the association con-
slider that the subject of this letter is
little concern, but that it does come
within the scope of the Chamber OF
Commerce.
Respectfully yours,
(Sgd) ROYAL D. MEAD,
Asst Secty H. S. P. A.
The letter referred to was as fol
lows:
stoneleigh Court, Washington, D. C.
Feb. %, 1907.
w o. Smith, Esq. Secretary, H. S. P
Association, Honolulu, Hawaii.
Dear Sir: Bonded Warehouses and
Free Zone-Secretary Shaw in a re-
cent speech at Concord, N. H, suggest
ed a plan to set apart certain small
tracts of land on the sea coast upon
which factories could be established in
which raw material could be brought
in from foreign countries and manu-
factured articles exported without any
intervention of the custom house
authorities. If the goods, however
manufactured from such raw materials
should be desired to be sold in the Uni
ted States, the appropriate duties will
be taxed against them before they
would be permitted to leave the reserv-
ed area. This, Secretary Shaw points
out. is but an extension of the existing
law permitting rebates. For instance
the manufacturers of tin cans, if they
import the tin plate and pay duty or
it, are entitled to a rebate of the en-
tire duty upon such amount of goods as
they export This plan, if applied tC
Hawaii might lead to a very grea
extension of our commerce. 1t is right
in line with the idea suggested in con
nection with the proposed consular
convention as discussed in the Homo
lulu press some months ago. If it Is
port for the storage and subsequen
distribution to all quarters of the Pa
cifie of goods which might be sent there
from any part of the world, awaiting
orders, it is apparent that crucla
and vital consideration would be tn
ability to handle such goods independ
en-, Of the custom house. On TINS
might turn the whole success of III
! plan.
| The first step should be an applica
ton for the establishment of one o.
more bonded warehouses at Honolulu
| The location of these warehouse
should be selected with an eye to tn
possible application of Secretar!
| Shaw's idea by which certain areS
could be set apart as free zone. I'M
CONTINUED on Page Tnree)
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1907-04-11
CATTLE DYING IN CUBA.

HAVANA April 11-undred of cattle dying because OF
the drouth in Havana province
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1907-04-11
LA TOILETTE FOR ROOSEVELT.

HELENA Wis., April II-Senator La Toilette has declared
favor of Roosevelt for another
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1907-04-11

Sidney Miller Ballou. Walter ,. Frcar
and winifred u. Babbiit
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1907-04-11
NEW YORK HERALD FINED
FOR IMPROPER USE OF MAILS
NEW YORK. April 1.-The New York Herald has been fined
Ss1 900 for using the mails for improper purposes.

This is the prosecution of the Herald
nstgated by Hearst publishing and circulating the
saacious which has been feature OF the Her
AIDS first page for thirty years.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1907-04-11
THAW JURY IS
NOW EXPECTED
TO DISAGREE
Cuba May Resume Her independence
Within a Year---La Toilette for
RooseveIt--Chinese Navy.
ASSOCIATED Press Cablegrams.)

NEW YORK, April 1.-THE Thaw jury has been locked
o night 1t will probably disagree.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1907-04-11
HOLOCAUST IN LISBON.

LISBON April 1-Fteen people have been burned to death
here n apartment house fire.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-02-05
CARE OF A COAL STOVE.

AS for the coal stove-the bitter
experience with the coal famine
taught housekeepers all over the
country lessons in economy which
most of them will never forget. For
those whose memory needs jogging
the following suggestions are in
order. See that the ashes are emp
tied Systematically every morning.
If they are allowed to collect they
absorb the heat. Never leave the
smoke damper open except when the
fresh coal is first kindled in the
morning or when coal is put on Be
sure the chimney flue is cleared from
SCOT. Once in two or three years
is usually often enough. The range
aues should be attended to once
month. If the range is of the best
modern make, it is easier and more
economical to keep the fire over
night at this season.
At night see that the crate is free
from ashes and clinkers and bank
with coal. Shut off all draughts
and open the little door that lets
cold air over the fire. Shut the
kitchen door and leave window
down to let out any gas that may
escape. In the morning, rake the
fire little and turn on the draughts
In many households no extra coal i.
needed until after the breakfast
After the fire is made up, do not rake
down or disturb it, except once il
four or five hours, when a meal is
over and there is no need for a no,
fire, sprinkle cinders over the fire
and open the draught that lets cold
air on top. When you wish to use
the fire again, close the cold all
draught and open the draughts I'M
der it. Do not buy slaty coal, as
that means waste and trouble. A
mixture of pea coal with the stove
coal, either soft or hard, is con-
sidered by most old housekeepers
as specially advantageous - go
ington Star.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-02-05
81, !S. Y Il
S;lNl|TREGPESIySNH
NO e; ri q

Snowdrift Sauce-One cup of
cream, one cup powdered sugar, two
tablespoons wine, whites of three
eggs beaten to a foam. Add the
beaten whites of the eggs and beat
all together.
Dressed Lettuce-Arrange the let.
tuce on a dish. boil six eggs twenty
minutes. Make nests of the whites,
and rub the yolks through a strainer.
Over the whites sprinkle French
dressing, then over the whole.
Evaporated Apple Pies-Soak the
apples over night; in the morning
give them a good washing in warm
water, cut all bad places and c3re
and arrange as the others. e. ei
should bake forty minutes.
Club ndwiches-Toast slices oil
bread from which the crusts have
been removed. While hot, spread
with butter and put between the
slices a lettuce leaf, a slice of cold
roast chicken, slice of crisp fried
bacon and little mayonnaise dress
ing. Serve at once.
Beet Salad-Four medium-sizec
red beets, boiled in salt water, peeled
and cut in half-inch cubes. Mix with
these one pound of shelled pecans
broken in pieces. Serve in nest OF
shredded red cabbage. Garnish with
mayonnaise or boiled dressing. Beets
should be marinated with French
dressing before mixing with nuts.
Nut Wafers-To make nut waters.
take quarter of pound of butter,
beat in one egg and one cup of sugar,
and keep beating till smooth. Add a
scant teaspoonful of vanilla, or half
a teaspoonful of almond extract, and
a cupful Of chopped nuts. Then stir
in one cup of well-sifted -four i'll
which has been mixed small tea
spoonful of baking powder. Drol
in small spoonfuls on buttered pa
and bake in hot oven.