The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-01-31
AYHH WKER JOT.S

! Salina thinks it is getting metropoli-
tan. 1t is to have a summer theater.
Roy Tapley, who spells it thru, -
laughs at the Wellington News for
spelling depot 'depo."
1t is a little early for robins, but A.
E. Robbins was recently caught by the
police at Independence and given the
customary fine for flying around with
too much ''likker'' on board.
Bert Walker calls the attention of the
Central Branch editors to the fact that
the season of the year when the Cen
trail Branch is extended has arrived and
they should whoop 'er up. The Central
Branch is always extended in the spring.
Little Johnnie Goodwin, of Salina,
like George Washington, is charged with
cutting down a tree that didn't belong
to him. Whether he couldn't tell lie
or not, is not stated, but the juvenile
IDENTIFY does not think that johnnie
Goodwin is not a good one.
A few years ago it was almost i'm
possible to give land away in western
Kansas, but that part of the state is
coming to the front rapidly, and $50
and $40 an acre is not an uncommon
price to be paid for farm lands in any
of the frontier counties. A top notch
price, according to the Cove County
Record. was paid few days ago when
40 acres of uplands sold for the sum of
$1,000. and it is said was bought as
speculation.
The Sabetha Herald some time ago in
augurated contest among it's subscribers
to get wood on subscription. In this way
Editor Tennel not only got ahead of
the coal famine, but his contest appears
Time was,'' he says, when a pretty
girl looked mighty good to us, but now
the sight of the last man who entered
our wooden subscription contest would
make the prettiest girl in Christendom
look homely by comparison"
Speaking of the way the language is
manipulated, a dyspeptic Atchisen man
went into restaurant the other day,
the Globe says, and ordered fried cat
fish. Fried cat bawled the waiter to
the cook. Instantly the weak stomach
rebelled. Cancel that order" the Gus
country sausage" "Sidetrack the cat
and make it bulldog" yelled the wait
er. and he is wondering yet why the
man grabbed his hat and left.
Osborne Farmer: 1t has finally
dawned on Old Bill shiftless that he
will not get a job at Topeka this year.
He is sore. Bill is a great anti-pass
advocate. The trouble with the pass"
says Bill. lis that it will influence too
many men. Now I can use a pass every
week and it wouldn't affect me little
bit, but it is not so with my neighbors.
My neighbors think it a great honor
when they are allowed to make a trip
at the expense of the railroad, and feel
it their duty to repay it at the first
opportunity. I am built of sterner stuff
ana know tnal tne railroads. Ieel nonor-
ed when 1 accept a favor from them"
1t might be stated that Bill has had
about three trip passes in his life. The
first one he got because he swore to a
lie in a lawsuit between a farmer and
the company. Bill favored the COM
pany. The pass puffed him up and he
confidently told the claim agent that
whenever the road could use him he
would be glad to accommodate them
He has since written several letters to
the company telling them where they
could make it hot for some poor devil.
When Old Bill thought he was going
to Topeka for the session he had some
cards printed. They read Hon. Will
lam Shiftless, Osborne, Kan In the
corner was his motto. Truth crushed
to earth will rise again" The printer
has since dunned Bill five times for
the pay for them and has been turned
down every time.