The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-05-19

Pictures BY GORDON ROSS

4
may sell out to thrust, an Admiral Farragut
climbs down firm his pedestal an is seen runnn
f'r th river.
a.- But it didn't happen that way at all. Th'
country whit to bed unusually early on that
fatal night, No wan thought " can' up th'3
newspaper offices an askin' if there was amy
news firm TIL Peace ollf'rencc. looked to SEQ
something comm out OIL til ticker, but tn ticker
was fully shameful account iva fight between
two fellows named Burke an Sullivan. I don't
care IT these things. They disgust me, thin
tarb,rous exhibitions, but / do think that if Sui
Ivan had kept his man off with his left an not
tlrlcd to mix it he might'vc--but what am I
talkin' about.
Sim sorry tn destruction " war has been
raycelved with no more enthusyasm thin ray
poort " tn fish commission in Aryzony But
SO it is An dye know, I've begun to have q
suspicyon that War may be more poplar thin
some " us thinks. It's been goin' on f'r good
NANNY years. Hogan tells me there was a peace
conference in Rome SO NANNY years ago that
it hust've been befure my time, an Joolyas
Cayzar sint his regards to it be a man he'd cap
tured in Bijum. I'm not f'r war; Pm again
it. But what am goin' to do with tn young
fellows? If there was wan man undher sixty at
tn Peace Conference I'd have a little something
down on Universal Peace. War amt IF tn old.
Their business is to set back practisn' checkers,
sage advice, an usury
" ENt to lad wars a picnic. If he didn't
feel that way there wudden't be amy wars
Ic can't convince tn kind " young fellow
that &c get fr sojers that it g perilous occypa-
tion Ho knows it amt, compared with tn kind
he's used to. Larkin has tn figures, an he can
prove 10 ye, that amy man brakin' on first
class American railroad listed on tn New York
STOCK Exchange has about five times as good a
chance to be kilt as th' most intrepid soicr.
How nanny old railroad men dye see around!
An how nanny yethrans " tn Grand Army "
tn Raypublic? ] know It's wrong fr a conscript
iii tn industhrcel army, who's detailed to tn
important post " canllin' white lead to fly his
jooty whin he's called upon to go out an shoot
firm behind three at foreigners that he used to
throw bricks at, but ye can't prove it to him.
War f'r this boy is three, four or five years "
tn kind " time he has f'r week ivry year
vhin him an Billy Walsh an old Stubby
Schwartz goes off campin' at Twin Lakes. .
'An' tn ladies What ARE ye goin' to do
about Thin? ARE ye goin' to abolish tn ladies
whin yc abolish WARP I know pawnbrokn is
z lEeTc non TaDlc pTollssJOn tnln war DuJ 1 nlYer
see amy bright glances " tn fair directed at
me frinL Alcse. Eve seen thin hand him iyry-
thing else, hut niver an eye. Th' ladies wud
keep war gon' if ivrybody else was again it, In
NE dsyl was no badge-horse mcsilf whin it come
to popularity with tn sex, but whiniyer I see q
coat with brass buttons wipin' its feet on tn
durc.n,at I reached 1lndher tn chair f'r me hat.
If stayed, knew I'd have to putin tn avenin'
talkin' with TIL old man about his rheumatism
Yes, sirycre against war, an SO am ], an
soisiyry body who knows tn way to tn dintists.
utyell niver get tn foolish an frivolous young
togivc it Up till ye practice TIL rule laid down be
th' newspapers f'r tn agonized wife who writes
in to ask how to keep her husband firm goin'
out nights: Make tn home as comfortable as
tn Saloon' An if ye raaly want to know what
til chances ar're " Permanent Peace ask yee1
son Packv which he'd rather be whin he grows
up to We a big man Gin'ral Grant or Andrew
Carnaygie. An they're both tn same size"
"Well, anyhow" said Mr. Hennessy, "wal
is tur-rklc thing. I had cousin; he was 9
stecple Jack, that was kilt at Gettysburg, an he
might've lived to an advanced old age =
off" said Mr.. Dooley he had lived. Peace
as Hogan says has lis victims less renowned
thin war"