Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-02-24
Foggarty:s Stunning to Mr., Blifkins-


Then, ye fat fa-aeed divil." cried Mrs.
pig?. .
Absurd. dye say said Mrs Foggarty,
turning on her with great Indignation.
Absurd is it? An me here walkin along
tn road. peaceable like, with me pig, both
of us mindin' our own bizness. an We
TURNS loose on us yer r-rid divil in a
whate gown! It's only tn protection av
the saints that kept us firm bein' squashed
fiat as griddie ca-ake-now will none av
yes cha-ase me pig?"
No one made move.
Thin I'll have tn law on YET" say
ing, Mrs. Foggarty shook her fist under
| their noses aggressively, and departed in
high dudgeon down the road toward Yap-
VILE
There's one thing 1 regret more than the
loss of six spoons, three forks, pickle fork,
and some dishes of my wedding outfit" said
Mrs. Blifkins in freezing tones to Mrs.
Blinks.
Indeed. and what is that?" retorted the
latter with equal hauteur.
That is, that our good sense should have
SO far departed from Mr. Blfkins and my
self as to lead us to trust ourselves in an
auto with that insignificant idiot!' pointing
to Blinks.
This is too muchr' cried Mrs. Blinks.
'Madam T.
At this point Mr. Blifkins interviewed hav-
ing stopped bakers wagon and engaged
passage in it for himself and wife for Duns-
ton Junction, whence they could get train
for the city. -'#
! So Mr. and Mrs. Bl.nks were left alone in
the road, gazing foriornly at each other as
the Biifkins had gone. The auto was gone.
The pig was out of sight. and so wass Mrs.
Foggarty-there was nothing for them to
do but walk into Yapville to see what had
become of the machine, which they proceed
ed to do, Blinks telling Lobelia on the way
how his sleeve had caught in the machinery
and started it.
Two daVS LATER IN the course of q con.
nubial contamination, MIR. Foggarty recount
ed to Mrs. Foggarty the exciting events that
occurred in Yaovi1le on the arrival Of
Blinks' automobile on that eyentful day.
Dye know. Honora, Dir. Foggarty said,
"befure We came that day. an tould as av
tn loss av VIM. ]. Bryan, an we stint
OHara's b'yes out an sot him., Tim OHara
an me was called t tn front ay his shtore
be seein' a runaway horse dash by.
Thin We saw cloud av dusht at tn
head TIL shtreet.
'Howly shmoke: says !, Il hwhat's that
comin'?'
4 d.nnaw.' says oHara, it looks like
ia able gone wild!
"'Th' saints preserve u.s.! says T. it's a
Bansheer
BE this time it had. ta-aken a suddint
turn off tn road an was comm down TIL
sidewalk lickty spit. an there was an ould
lady Fright in front av it..
" She'll be killed. shouts
It's TIL ould maid-th' minister's sis
ther,' yelis O'Hara. AM sizes as deaf as
posht,' says he, oh, me! Oh my! she's
goner! says he
But she wasn't-whin tn divol:sh thing
was within no more av distance than two
sixteenths av rid hair-shplit an polished
firm her-she seen it, an Whit! she was
up an awnin pole like a monkey, there she
chung t tn top av it, lettin off yells that
I'd make amy fog horn TIL Atlantic
coasht turn green with envy.
Meantime tn thing brushed on, an whin
1t met four byes a cararyin' av counter
out av shtore, it made kindlin' av tn
counter an left tn byes tangled up in tn
splinthers.
"Immajetly afther this it took wan more
turin, an wint bang! through plate glass
window into millinary sthore There was
fufteen wimmen in there at this time, an
they at once commincel an exhibition av
fufteen hundred different kinds av hys-
terics all over tn pla-ace.
"Mebbe twas this that scared tn thing
small blame to it-annyhow, it backed right
out av. TIL pla-ace, an run right over
across TIL shtreet down some steps into a
cobbler shop, an scared tn cob blers stiff
wan av thin was still THROWN fits whin I
left.
Here TIL thing shtopped. 1t turned over
air, squirtin' oil an benzine like a lawn
fountain, an here, FIR tn firsht time it was
discovered t be an automobile in dish
guise.
'Av coourse, there was wild excitement,
an whin, afrher a time, little man ap-
peared, bareheaded, with his collar half
TORN Off his coat r-ripped up tn ba-ack,
his pa-ants shmeared with black, an tn
sole av wan av his patent leather shoes
half TORN off, tn crowd knew without his
sayin' wor-rd, he was tn propreather av
TIL rid divole, an they wud have lynched
him, then an there, but FIR his wife bein'
with him.
He was arristed at wonct. TIL joodge
fined him sivinty-fve dollars, an made him
pay FIR all tn damages
1t was indade sight t. see him payin'
thin, an they was all prislnt EXCEPT
Wan-''
'Phwat wan was that?" enqured Mrs.
Foggarty.
There was no bill brought in FIR fright
enin' tn zinc linin' out av tn ou,d maid,
tn minister's sisther.
"Afther ,telln' him he wud like t. send
him up FIR a million years, TIL joodge let
him CO.
Who was they?' asked Mrs. Foggarty.
Teddy Corcoran who r'rins tn elevator
av tn Skyborough Flats knows them. They
live there, he says, and so does the other
couple that was along They don't speak
now, he says. Bechune TIL wimmin. it used
t. be Pet an rDarlin',' he says, now whin
they meet in TIL elevator, tn air gets so
could it I'D ma AXE you SILVER he says
"Annyhow it's sorry thing, Mrs Fog
garty, people have no more sinse of fit
ness"
.'Phwhat do we name by that, Dinnis?''
Il name, Mrs. Foggarty, that if We had
good sinse, We wudn't try t. ma-ake churn