davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20
Interrupted Love Thoughts.

Little Tommy Heating, of the Office
force at the Hotel st. Francis, used to
be a ball player himself, apd is still
so much interested that he thinks
and talks in the slangof the diamond.
Heating was intently, composing a
love letter yesterday. A chauffeur
had come to the desk and asked ii a
certain guest was good pay" and
the cashier was looking it up in the
ledger. The telephone girl from be-
hind the key rack had just asked if
Fred Swanton, of Santa Cruz, was in,
and Clerk Mccullough was looking
to see if the key was in the box. A
man neal the counter was at the mo-
ment explaining why he couldn't get
any laundry done.
There's a strike shouted the
man to his deaf friend.
Hes out" said Mccullough to the
telephone operator.
Hes safe" called the cashier
from his desk.
what! What" calculated little
Tommy, suddenly coming out of the
land of candy hearts and forget-me-
nots. Flows that? Whose error?
Rotten umpiring!"- San francisco
Chronicle.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20
Diet of the Oldest Parisienne.

This is the daily diet of Nine. Rob
lnson, aged 107, the Oldest inhabitant
of Paris: Early in the morning she
takes a cur of chocolate and a biscuit.
At noon she eats some eggs, mashed
potatoes or peas and fruit, and in the
evening at 6 O'Clock, about an hour
before she go~3 to bed, she takes a
bowl of soup. She drinks only water
sweetened with a little sugar and
colored with a drop of wine. For
years she has scarcely tasted any
meat, and only once in a while she
takes a little breast of chicken. On
this diet she expects to live happily
still many years.--New York World
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20
The CASTOR Baby.

The stork had been a recent visitor
TO the home of Mrs. Smith, who al
ready was the mother of a year-old
baby boy. A chance meeting in the
corner market was the opportunity
for Mrs. Smiths neighbor, Mrs.
Jones, to break the news to her friend
Mrs. Brown.
Dorothy Jones, five years old,
paused in her task Of arranging the
covers about her new doll. She had
experienced difficulty recently in find
ing in the person of a less fortunate
neighbor girl a mother for a doll
with a broken nose and one arm that
had been her former favorite, and
for which there was no room in her
diminutive establishment when the
new doll came. She pulled at her
mothers skirts inquiringly.
Mamma" she asked, did you say
Mrs. Smith had a new baby?'>
Eyes, dearie, q brand-new baby
answered the mother.
"Well, mamma" came the unsatis-
fed query, what's she going to do
with Observation-Disclosures Tribune.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20
MRS. SADIE ABBOTT

Women for the most part spend
their lives at home, and it is these
women who are willing and ambitious
that their homes shall be kept neat
and pretty, their children well dressed
and tidy, who do their own cooking
sweeping, busting and often washing
ironing and sewing for the entire
family, who call for our sympathy.
Truly the work of such a woman
is never done" and is it any wonder
that she breaks down at the end OF q
few years, the back begins to ache,
there is a displacement, Inflammation
or liberation of the abdominal organs,
a female weakness is brought on, and
the struggle of that wife and mother
to continue her duties is pitiful.
Lydia e. Pinkham'S Vegetable
Compound, made from native roots
and nerps, is the exact medicine a
needs whose strength is over
taxed. 1t keeps the feminine organs
in a strong and healthy condition.
In preparing for childbirth and re-
cuperating therefrom it is most eff
Gent. 1t carries a woman safely
through the change of life and in
making her strong and well assists
her to be a good wife and mother.
Mrs. Sadie Abbott, of Jeanette,
Pa, writes !:
Dear Mrs. Pinkham-
I. II suffered severely with pain every
month and also a pain in my left side. My
doctor prescribed for mo but did me no
good; a friend advised Lydia E.. Pinkham's
Vegetable Compound and wrote you IN
regard to my condition. followed your
advice and am a perfectly well woman. The
pains have all disappeared and canno'
recommend your medicine too highly"
lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Con
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20
Catching Cold.

A b~aldheaded physician as he
brushed a few flies from the white
and polished dome of his skull, said:
II used to be dreadfully subject to
colds even in the summer. l had to
veal a black skull cap all the time.
The minute l took 1t off l began to
sneeze and wheeZe. Bat now for q
year / have not once o a skull
cap and | have not once had a cold.
Why, 1 could go and stand bareheaded
in a snowstorm without any i'll eff
feet. My immunity to colds comes
from this: Every morning l put my
head under the cold water spigot and
let the cold water run for a minute
on my bald crown. This is a refresh
ing thing, and since l began to do it
I have never had a cold."-Milwauk9
T(d1rnal
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20
Innocent but Infectious.

A man running toward the Reading
Railway station, Germantown, on Sat
urday, as if in great haste to make
the train, was the cause of enliven-
ing the gate Of a number of other
pedestrians bent on that purpose,
among whom were several women who
fancied they late for the train.
AS the latter wore shoes of the cramp-
ed pattern known as pumps, their dis
comfort in running may be imagined
When, breathless, they reached the
station they found the first runner
sitting comfortably and reading a pa
Ser, with ten minutes margin before
train time. One of the women, made
bold by Indignation, advanced upon
the cause of her anger with the query:
'What we're you running for? The
answer was For my health.'-Phil-
delphia Record
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20
Hat That Made Butler Good Looking.

Did you ever know that Gen. Ben
jamin F.. Butler considered himself
a handsome man? Well, he did, says
the Boston Herald, and there is a
letter in his own handwriting pasted
On a Washington street store window
to prove it. Ben wrote it in July,
1879, and thanked a firm of hatters
for the gift Of a "~skypiece" in these
words:
Il take pleasure in acknowledging
the receipt of your hat, with thanks
for your kindness. The proof of the
pudding is in eating tie bag said
the proverb, AMI l have worn your
hat both ashore and afoat and do
say it is n of the best if not the
best hat l ever wore. Besides, l have
been complimented for my good looks
with it on. With thanks for youI
kindness, l am very truly yours,
"BENJAMIN F. BUTLER"
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20
BLACK, ITCHING SPOTS ON FACE.
Physicians Called 1t Eczema in Worst
Form-Patient Despnircd of Cure
-Cuticura Remedies Cure Her.

about four years ago | was afflicted
With black splotches all over my face and
a few covering my body, which produces! a
severe itching irritation, and which caused
me a great deal of suffering, to such an ex-
tent that / was forced to call in two OF the
leading physicians of . After a thor
ouch examination of the dreaded complaint
they announced it to be skin eczema In its
worst form. Their treatment did me no
good. Finally I became respondent and de-
,ided to discontinue their services. Then my
husband purchased a single set of the Cutl-
cura Remedies, which entirely stopped the
breaking out. / continued the use of the
Cuticura Remedies for six months, and
after that every splotch was entirely gone.
I have not felt a symptom of the eczema
since, which was three years ago. Mrs.
Lizzie E. Sledge, $40 Jones Ave, Selma
Ala. Oct. %. 1895" .
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20
MRS. PRE- MsKlTRlCK

Mrs. Pree McKitrick, of La Fargo,
Wis, writes
Dear Mrs. Pinkham:
ssFor six years I suffered from female
weakness. [ was so irregular that 1 would
go from three weeks to six months, SO l
Thought I would give Lydia &. Pinkham's
Vegetable Compound q trial.
work without a pain. Any one who wishes,
can write to me and I will answer all letters
gladly"
Women shouldremember that Lydia,
E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound
holds the record for the greatest
number of actual cures of female ills.
Every suffering woman in TIL e
United States is asked to accept the
following invitation. It is free, will
bring you health and may save
your life.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20

eat well, and finally became crippled
and bent owe with rheumatism.
Doan's Kidney Pills brought quick
relief, and, in time, cured me. Though
/ lost 40 pounds, l now weigh 200,
more than ever before"
Sold by all dealers. SO cents a box
Foster-Milburn Co.. Buffalo. N. Y.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20

A recent novel says a mar really
needs two wiyes-a Martha wife 10
ai, the beds and order the dinner, ana
a Mary wife to look at and tax TO-
Guess whether the novel was written
bv a woman or d man, insists the bos'
ton Globe
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20

was lurking IN my
system for years. l
had %torturing pain
in the side and
back and the urine
was dark and full
of sediment. | was
racked with pain,
day and night,
could NOT S1nan oT'
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20

James ]. Jeffries is the only oellig-
erent on record who is faithfully liv-
ing up to the principles Of the Peace
Conference, declares the New York
American.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20
Weak Ewes

Are made strong by Leonardi's Eye Lotion
Inflammation is cured without pain in one
day. No other eye remedy so pure and heal
ing. Keeps the eyes in working trim. 1t
makes strong eyes. Guaranteed or money
refunded. Druggists sell it at 25 cts. or
forwarded prepaid on receipt of price by S.
B. Leonardo q Co, Tampa, Fla.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20

In Greece the usual price of olive
oil is only about twenty cents a quart
at wholesale. When the yield is
c%eptionally large, pure oil is stiS
cheaper.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20

You can't make a woman believe
there is any real trouble in the world
the first afternoon she wears her
new hat.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20

Both the above mentioned medicines are
wholly made up from the glyceric extracts OF
native, medicinal roots. The processes EN-
Moved in their manufacture were original
Viii DR.. Pierce. and they are carried on by
skilled chemists and pharmacists with the
aid of apparatus and appliances specially
designed and built for this purpose. bot1
ali other harmful, habit-formins drugs; A
full list of their ingredients is printed on
each bottle-wrapper.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20

FITS. ST. Vitus' Dali e N ervous Diseases per
manently cured by DR.. Kllne's Great Nerve
Restorer. 50 trial bottle and treatise free.
Dr. II. r. Kline, Id, Q3l Arch ST.. Phila.. Pa
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20

You can generally figure out some
how what a man means by what No
says unless he is running for office.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20
AT a recent examination a British
candidate In the London College OF
Music defined a musical interval as
40 short Il for refreshments"

When a man is making all sorts OF
Faces at himself in a mirror he usu-
ally isn't crazy, only shaving.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20

A girls idea of being bold is to for
get to look daggers at a man who
gives her his seat in a street car.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20
Mrs. pinkham's Invitation to Women.

Women suffering from any form of
female weakness are invited to
promptly communicate with Mrs
Pinkham, at Lynn, Mass. From the
symptoms given, the trouble may be
located and the quickest and surest
way of recovery advised. Out of her
vast volume of experience in treating
female ills Mrs. Pinkham probably
has the very knowledge that will
help your case. Her advice is free
and always helpful.
,oand Succeeds Where 0tlers Fall
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20

It's hard for a girl to take as much
interest in your love making if she
suspects you mean it.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20

There's hardly anything in the
world excites a woman more than to
have somebody call her up on the tele-
phone when she is away and not
leave word who it is.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20

If a man that a girl is in love with
asks a policeman where a street Is
she calls him strong and brave.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20

That our American forests abound in
plants which possess the most valuable
medicinal virtues is ~abundantly attested
by scores of the most eminent medical
writers and teachers. Even the UNTIL
tored Indians had discovered the useful
ness of many native plants before the
advent of the white race. This informa-
ton, impaired freely to the whites, led
the latter to continue Investigations until
to-day we have a rich assortment OF most
valuable American medicinal roots.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20

Some men expect you to do a IA
o for them as il they were doing
it for you.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20
Sheridan in a National Convention.

SnerIQan IN a N6LtOici SOhsS''s'S'"
1T is a tradition that no American
ever refused a Presidential nomina-
tion,7 said Judge w. B. Rodgers, CITY
Solicitor of Pittsburg, land yet l saw
a very noted man stammer forth a
remuneration of the place, although
it had not really been rendered him.
It was at the Chicago convention OF
1880, when we batt!ed for days be-
fore Garfield finally o was there
as one of the SOC who stuck by Grant
to the last ditch. somebody in the
convention hall shouted out: Mr..
Chairman, | nominate General PHI
Sheridan fer President There were
cheers. and in a moment the little
oavalryman was on his feet, very
greatly confused, very red in the lace
and yet determined to speak. Please
don't mention my name he said. !
assure you that | have no such am
bition. l am loyal to my old chief.
Then he sat down amid a tremendous
uproar of plaudits. Washington Her
aid.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20

Racked With Pain, Day and Night.
For Years.

VIM. H. Walter, engineer of Chats
worth, Ills, writes: kidney disease
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20
Indirect Persuasion.

On a vacant lot In West Philadel.
phia and down In a hollow made by
raising the grade OF the streets new
ly opened through some old farming
land there were observed the other
day two men huddled Q a tiny fire,
which was famed by the same wintry
wind that blew through their long
and flowing whiskers. One OF the
knights OF the road was eating some
thing out Of a tin can, aud the other
was reading a newspaper. Il could
dig that channel for The Delaware
said the reader, for less money than
the subway would cost. I'd get a
lot of gold dust and salt the bottom;
put it light on the surface and squirt
1t in with a force pump so as to make
mere gold the deeper you went. This
need only be done in n spot. Then
I'd have some n discover that spot
and begin to dredge cut the gold
The city could then sit back end take
in money for permits to 'redse, and
the channel would soon he cleared
cut all the way down without fur
Their expense.'-Philadelpllia Record.
The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1907-06-20

It's a very strong friendship that
can survive intimacy.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1907-03-29
ArtfuI Autooraph Fiend,

zone Of the most interesting collec
tions Of autographs IS owned by man
who cultivated the art Of kicking IL
order TO secure them," said an auto
graph expert. Every signature In the
collection was appended to a letter
written by some prominent person IN
reply to a complaint made by the IN
defatisabe kicker. He complained
about everything under the sun, to rail-
road presidents about delays on the
road. to public officials about abuses
in their systems Of managing public
interests, TO literary men and artists
about shortcomings in their work, to
actors and singers about some defects
in favorite role, and always his com
plants were couched In such virile
language as to win consideration and
n reply. not from some secretary, but
from the celebrity whose autograph he
coveted. d."-Milwaukee Sentinel.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1907-03-29
Where Eoas Are Thickest.

"In going from Rome to Paris" said
a young man, Il p..id extra money tt
cross the st. Gothard, but that lofty
Alpine pass was disappointment. Il
was foggy, and l saw nothing OF the
Alps. Hard luck, ehT'
Not at ALL" replied the globe trotter
Nearly everybody finds the St Go
thard wrapped In fog and mist. The
st. Gothard, In fact, is the fOggiesi
place In the world. London has 3S
days Of fog q year, Munich has Al
Hamburg has 80, Tegernsee, in the
Bavarian Alps, has 134. Overlapping
all Of them comes the St. Gothard
with an annual average Of 277 foggy
days"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1907-03-29
SUGAR In Coffee.

The average amount of sugar used
In coffee is a study which has become
so much OF a fascination to a yount
man who frequents restaurants pretty
constantly that he has taken to going
to different places for each meal ID
order to enlarge the sphere OF his OBJ
servations among different classes OF
people, says the Philadelphia Record
Poor people, as a rule" he says, use
more sugar than rich people, and It's
also a pretty constant rule that men
drink sweeter coffee than women and
that old men have the sweetest tooth
of all when It comes to coffee. 1t is
noticeable. too, that drinkers OF AFTER
dinner coffee make 1t very much sweet
er than that which they take In the
morning. l know a middle aged man
who takes Just two Jumps to q cup In
the morning, which is below the aver
age. but into the little cup he takes
after dinner he puts six full sized
Jumps. This makes sort of sirup OF
the drink, which, suppose, takes the
place of after dinner bonbons."
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1907-03-29
The ADVANTAGE of an Accident.

"The small size Of the propeller
screw" says noted shlpbuilder, "is
not due to the perception OF any In
ventor Of its greater effect as com
pared with a larger one, but purely tc
accident. Many years ago screws fol
steamers were made as large as posi-
bic, II being the theory that the great
er the diameter the higher the speed
A vessel was sent to sea with a screw
so large that It was deemed best tt
cast each blade In two parts and ther
weld them together. During storm
all three blades Of the propeller broke
at the welding, reducing the diameter
by more than two-thirds. To the sur
prise Of the captain the vessel shot for
ward at speed such as had never
been attained before Engineers ther
experimental with small prOpellers
and discovered that they were mucl
more effective than large ones. Had T.
not been for that accident we nigh
have gone on using large bladec
screws to the present day"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1907-03-29
Why Horses Shy.

The horse SHE'D at piece OF white
paper, and the rider tumbled off into
the mud.
ut is well for the world" said an
automobilist. smiling, that 1t Is ceas-
ing to use the horse for servant The
horse is half blind giant, with the
mind Of baby. No wonder. then. that
when we trust out lives In his keeping
he is apt to go back on us.
His main trouble Is his eyes. So
poor is the horses sight that he mis-
takes bank Of snow for fierce white
beast. A mud puddle at his feet Is
yawning chasm. A shadow flung across
his path Is black terror seeking his
life; hence the weakminded, nearsight-
ed, powerful horse goes through life
beside himself with fear. He Is no
more TO be trusted than maniac, and,
like a maniac. he sees a monster await
Ing him at every corner. Yet we get
on his back, fools that we are. New
Orleans T.mes-Democrat.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1907-03-29
Battles Decided by a SinaIe Shot.

There are certainly three instances
on record Of siege or battle having
been decided by single shot. First IN
order Of importance was the shot be
lieved To have been fired by one Of his
own men which killed Charles MI. In
the trenches OF the fortress Of Fried
richstein. which Immediately led to the
raising OF the second siege Of Fried
richshall. This is perhaps the most i'm
portant musket shot ever fired In the
history of the world. Next comes the
discharge of the mortar fired by Lord
COchrane during the defense Of Port
Trinidad in 1S0S. This shot foiled o
French surprise and saved the fortress
Lastly, there was the single discharge
Of grapeshot which saved the fortress
and town OF HaddingtOn in 1913. The
French invaders had actually forced
their way into the outworks of the cas-
tie when the one well directed shot
created such havoc in their densely
packed ranks that there ensued an I'm.
mediate panic which ended In flight.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1907-03-29
Tra;ned Too Well.

In Baltimore the rule OF the trans
portation companies is that children
over the age of five years must pay
full fare. those under that age being
carried free.
One afternoon not long ago there
were among the passengers on q
Charles street car woman and her
son. the latter a big boy Of apparently
seven years, but who was held in his
mothers lap as If he were a baby.
Presently the lad grew resuye'
"Alommer, mommer," he murmured'
''say, mommer!"
The mother, with premonition OF
impending danger. tried to silence the
youngster, but 10 no avail, for he con-
tinued to call upon his "mommer.'
Finally the Woman asked, well,
what is 1t, cDn:'
"Mommer. W. \ do / say I'm only
five? asked the irrepreSsible.-New
York Times.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1907-03-29
Quear Tinekeepers.

To ascertain the time at night the
Apache Indians employ a gourd on
which the stars Of the heavens are
marked. AS the consultations rise in
the sky the Indian refers to his gourd
and finds out the hour. BY turning the
gourd around he can tell the order In
which the consultations may be ex-
pected TO appear. The hill people OF
Assam reckon time and distance by
the number Of quids Of betel nuts
chewed 1t will lie remembered how,
according TO Washington Irving, Gov
ernor Wouter van Twiller dismissed
the Dutch colonial assembly invaria-
bly, at the last puff of his third pipe OF
tobacco. A Montagnis Indian OF Can
ada will set up tall stick in the snow
when travelling ahead Of friends who
are to follow. He marks with his foot
the line OF shadow cast, and by the
change in the angle Of the shadow the
oncoming party can tell on arriving at
the spot about how far ahead the
leader Is. Doubtless the first time
keeper was the stomach, which noti-
fed its owner when the hour for q
meal arrived.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1907-03-29
Maxine IL Pleasant.

81 am nineteen years old and go te
parties good deal. | want to make
myself pleasant and agreeable, but an
a poor conversationist. Could you
suggest some topics of conversation
that would take we'll in mixed com
pany? MABEL
Yes, Mabel. AS soon as you enter
the parlor shake your head and exclaim
IN loud tone:
"Oh, dear! washed my hair yester'
day and can't do a thing with IT."
That makes Il hit right away and
puts every one at ease. This express
sion can be used whenever converse.
ton lags. Music is great help. Ex'
press yourself this way:
well, | don't know anything about
music, but l do know what pleases
me-"
This will give the idea that you are
a musician.
To discuss art all you have to do Is
look at the pictures on the wall ano
when you see one you like exclaim:
isn't that q beaut?"
This will divulge your artistic sense.
At the supper table reach for the
olive dish and say:
There was q time when couldn't
eat olives, but l can eat whole bot
tie of them now"
Then take FIVE in one grab, and peo
pie Will like you for saying what you
mean. With these few hints you'll
find conversation comparatively easy
Detroit Free Press.