Los Angeles herald., 1907-09-22
The Yonkers Statesman

conversational joke. He has made the
Yonkers Statesman famous wherever the
English language is read. Ed has been
accused of, and has never successfully
denied writing more than $1,000 jokes AT
the convention he distributed sharpened
leadpencils labeled "a joke with a point
"The Night She Whispered W.wwhy, y
by Alfred j. Waterhouse of the Sacra-
mento Union, follows:
The stars were kind o. tender on that night o.
long ago:
There was just a lingering splendor of the
western afterglow,
An little breeze was whisperin' me, 'Ill
bet you dasn't try
An another one suggestin'. But there amt
nobody nigh"
sort o. recollect my heart was lngerin' in
my mouth.
An 1 wasn't precisely certain If we's going
north or south;
But summoned up my courage. an I kissed
An seems to me hear her now, the way she
whispered. ''W-w-why!"
Pr'aps I want scared at what I'd done. But,
still, she looked so nice
I couldn't help a-thinkin' that twus cheap at
any price
An when my senses glimmered back they
seemed to make 1t known
There want much indignation In her manner
er her tone;
An 50 I says, Hope you amt mad; you
An she she sorter dropped her head and says.
IT orter be-"
An since that time I've always knowed there
amt much trouble nigh
When girls that's kissed don't much resist an
only whispers "W-w-why!
I'm sort O. wonderin' here tonight-just won
derin'. that's all
If she could reach her hands to me from past
the misty wall,
If she could come through all the years and
yanctlA rCIn
Somehow this wonderin' seems to make a fell
low teary-eyed-
If she could come and walk with me. sweet as
she used to be-
I guess it makes the angles glad that blessed
girl to see
An s'posin' I should kiss her then-but not
I'm wonderin film wonderin' if-well, If
she would whisper, 'W-w-why?'
Al "Liverwurat"
Waterhouse is known from one end of
the Golden State to the other, yet when
he journeyed up to Mount Lowe the other
day a country newspaper mentioned him
as AL Liverwurst. Al told the story in
the Alexandria lobbK with a good deal of
relish and this remark: I've heard of
water in most everything elss, but how
they can mix it UP In liverwhrst is be-
yond me-"
In '"The Vacation of PRESS Humorist,"
Robert j. Burdette, ID. d., relates the
joys and trials of a Jester who HES him
away from the dust and noise of the city
to the quiet seclusion of a farm. 1t is re-
plete with ridiculous situations in Bob's
original style, and concludes with the
lines;
"If my life just holds out till summer is gone,
I'll neer leave the city again"
Hearst Eppigrammiticals by Dinkel-
spiel" from the the pen of George "
Hobart, are as startling and entertaining
as Dink usually is in German dialect.
Judd Mortimer Lewis of the Houston
(Tex.) Post contributed Even Then"
Said the protoplasmlc atom
To the cell, 1--WE have no souls
Now but I've premonition
That the tide OF time that rolls
Ever onward, ever upward,
VIII shape us, and call us human;
I will be man. / fancy;
You, think will be a woman.
We are predestined for each other;
We, in our new life's heyday,
VIII be~separate till some time,
Dawdling slowly down the way,
We shall meet, each with the other,
And this thing l somehow wis.
You shall have blue eyes and red lips
Lips my own shall long to kiss
Have you no such feeling in you?
Nossuch hoping? No foresight
That tells you my thoughts true ona-