New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1907-07-15
THE DOLPHIN" MIXED.
WHAT is JAP JINGILISMh
Bill" Says He's Thinking Of a
Jimmy Ricksha5c. Name of an Auto.

.JlnlHlU htChSUUtC, " UHC " CtH <1utOs
Although the sum total of his wealth Is up In
the six figures. Honest Bill QugIey the Battery
boatman never allows pleasure 10 interfere with
business. He had planned to take the family down
10 Atlantic City yesterday. but note which came
Indirectly from Bronco" announcing that tho
steamer Montevideo TO be shifted to another
pier at noon caused the boatman to cancel the
engagement and inform Bronco that he would
be hand
Bill got UP at a m. usual. and after
twenty-mile spin in his S0-hOrsepower touring car
he dropped into the Ship News ONCE wait until
BRONCO was ready to shift the Montevideo- He
found the Battery Dolphin" examining a dollar
watch that Charlie" Bretz had sent to him as a
wedding present. The watch ran for about half an
hour after the Dolphin wound IL up. a week
ago and then stopped for good.
What YOU got there. Jimmie2'' said BILL lean
Ing over the shoulder of his protege
Why that watch that Bretz sent me for
present 1t the bum for week. but I got
1t going at last I'm pretty wise guy when IL
comes to fxin' machinery This here ticker had
too many wheels in IT, They put plenty of EN- in.
ye know. to make en- heavy. an I took three OF
en- out an now she's K. There was cock
roach ketched I'm the main spring. an when
picked him out she went all right
The Dolphin was attired he never had been
before, and bill" could not help expressing his
approval Il tell YOU. Jimmie there's nothing like
having the sword Of female Dackeles hanging in
yer rigging To make you dress like a dude Lizzie
surely is going TO make a gentleman Of YOU
The Dolphin" had blue serge suit. pair
gled from a West Coast steamer. He made
reply 70 "BtllS' comment on the way Lizzie had
taken him in hand. but. carefully putting into his
pocket the dollar watch. drew his chair closer to
Quisley. who was now fitting back and forth in
'Flotsam'' Woods rocker.
Say. BILL said the 'Dolphin.' what IL tbs
meanin' OF the word Jap Jinglism?"
Search me- laughed Bill" You talk like fae
woman. Cut out the pigeon English and talk
United States and maybe I'll be able TO answer
YOU
Well I'll try TO make nneself claretfed heard
~ In 0TIr
the Japanese Jingiisrn and I asked Soulet what it
meant He said IL was a two-wheeled cart. like
a hanson cab. that Jap hitched 70. TO cart
the Jap ladies 70 the department stores. looked
for the word in the directory. and they amt Moth
IN dom, 1t amt there SoUlet pernonced Il Diff,
ferent from the tars, and what he said sounded
Ike gin rcky. I'd Ike to"
stop. stop said Qugley decisivsly. "You'rs
getting voTser and worse. You're hopeless. You'vo
got the word tngosn. which means yellow Jap
newspaper agfvaton. mixed up with Jimmy Rick
shaw. the mama Of the latest japanese autono-
bile"
Clear as a bell 70 me now Bill" said the Dol
phin.' bearning Maybe when I'm as old as you.
BIZ. TIL have education. too. You know, from
what seen and hold in the last three weeks.
think we're goin' TO mix things wild the Japs, The
they wouldn't be goin' sixty thousand miles around
the Horn IL they didn't hggsr on Hckin' some
body"
Don't show your fgnerence by taIktn' Ike that"
replied Bill calmly Don't ever let hear you
express yourself like that again You're as bad
as the lingo newspapers III tell you what to
think and what say, and II I hear you sxprsssn'
any opinions opposed 70 I'll disown YOU
An right. Bill you're Fire away
about two years ago continued Bill 'I went
10 church, and slept through nearly all Of the
mon. but heard one psrt Of II that was mighty
blamed good and never forgot II. The preachers
told the congregation to be always prepared.
That's great advice and that's Just what the prac-
tice cruise of the fleet 70 the coast means Ths
government Is gettin' the into prime shape.
and that's the easiest way 70 keep out OF scrap
Then they amt nothin' dOin' in the yellow
| tingtlisTn?'' observed the Dolphin
Not now; OF course not. But its hard tellins
what that Christian Science agivaton will lead to.
/ The Japs friendly. and we. but IL the
lingo papers keep handin' out them Christian Sci
| 70 think that scrap is up 70 us with no way out
| of IT."
| The Dolphin agreed that Bill was dead right
/ on that prospotition but he thought that where
there was so much smoke there ought 10 be "a few
burnt matches LAWN round. This aroused Bill
70 fever heat. and. bringing his fst down the
desk he fairly shouted:
Never YOU have fear about burnt nnatchesy
Wave got down there IN Washington. the
likes Of which YOU and I have never seen before
Hes the grandest President thar you I Will
out for the good OF all Of US? He what he's
don'. and II amt Nd 10 the government 70 tell
bunch Of wildcat yellow JingOes what the answer
is"
just "a Bill finished his defamation the telephone
bell rang. and the Dolphin after jumping the
receiver, announced that "BrOnzo' waiting az
Pier g.
AN right. Ne for the Montevtdeo." said Bill.
rushing for the door. Remember. now. Dolphin
what tell you and hereafter thern's your views
on rhs Jimmy Rickshaw,'