The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1907-09-20
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= Troubles of Becky Ann. =
= By Ethel Thomas. q
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them dudes had orful coffin spell,
and the other busted out to laffin
and sed he jest happened to think Of
a leckture he herd the mite before,
and that ever time it crosst his men,
ory he had to laff, no diffrunce where
he happened to be. If they hadn't a
| bin sich tony looking fellers, I wood
thought maybe they was laffin at
me; but they looked like they had
been we'll razed. Well, I alters was
quick to kerch on to most any thing,
SO locked over that paper agin and
told that yaller man to bring me some
tea. (I jest ordered it cawse I hadn It
never seen none, and if I live long or
di soon, hope I'll never see no more.
It tasted fur awl the world like Sim
mons Liver Regulater) and some
ham, eggs, rice, butter, bred and so
on. Purity soon here come servant
with a big tray full Of stuf-awl I
had ordered and hole lot more, and
perseeded to bizness. Won Of them
dudes got threw and went out, and
I sot there a eatin and a wishin the
tother'n wood go too. But no, sir,
/, he wanted to git up a conversation
with me, and had to give him a
pease Of my mind before T got rid Of
him. I jest wish TO goodness Jeems
cud hearn him! Ny my! If he had |!
Mr.. Editer, did you ever stay in a
room where there was a little button
on the wall, and by pressin it you
could git jest anything you happened
to take notion fur?
! Well, that is the kind stade in.
T don't no what kind Of inven-
ton will be next. People air gittin to
be overly smart, and how, and some
Of 'em think they can make jest any,
thing.
"It's wonderful, nowadays, how they
drop the olden ways,
And new appliances are every where !;
We have elevators high that will land
Us to the sky,
And let us down again with prope:
care,
We have telephones that talk from
Chicago to New York,
And patent cradles, too, for one and
all;
But to give fellow ease, you can get
just what you please,
When you press the little button on
the wall!
Your tailor you can shun, when he
calls to make dun,
Your wife need never hear you come
home late;
If you want private drink, you have
only got to wink,
The button does the business while
you wait,
If you find your ma-in-law has a lit
tie too much jaw,
And makes within your home too
long a call,
You can make her too the mark md
she'll vanish like lark.
When you press the little button on
the wall!
In politics you'll win, tho your
chances may be thin;
Your pockets will be always lined with
cash;
You can make the girls admire, if to
fashion you aspire,
Among the great -Four Hundred you
can mash
If you haven't got an heir, or would
maybe like pair;
Or want the earth you only have to
call,
There's nothing you can't get, if you
want it you can bet,
If you press the little button on the
WALL"
That's won Of Marthy Jane NATL
dy's songs, and I alters thought that
them senterments was stretched till
I occipide room where won Of them
buttons was. Well, as [ cudn't think
of thing I wanted, never toch
that button that mite, but I made
things lively as I come on back!
wont tell you about that till I get to
it, and I may change my mind and
not tell about it at all. I don't like
to tell things on myself no how.
left SALISBURY soon Monday mornlr
a.l +oo1- +bo 1,1or. f,,r Groonvil1a 8