Bisbee daily review., 1907-01-10

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 "I read dot to my husband, und he says 1t vhas no poetry-nothing spir- ituelle about It.
 Dot vhas shealousy some more. He can't write poetry himself, und so be don't vhant you to. A dead horse vhas spirituelle if he vhas of de right color Go home. young womans-go home und know you vhas all right. Why, if some one comes here und says to me vhas dere some womans around here to be an angel in a procession I mention your name first of all. Yes. sir, you bet, und der newspapers fall over each odder to get your picture"
 Hans, you yhas der best man liv- ing" says dot vomans. Und vben she goes out she vhas smiling und making some dimples in her fat cheeks.
 Dot same day an old man comes in to have q cement patch on his shoe for 15 cents. He sits down nit gYunt und don't say nottings for ten min utes. Den he speaks cop: FEHEs
 ''Cobbler, I vhas courting q widow womans. belief spend one hoonerd dollars in one year buying her presents. She says she yhill marry me, but when she finds don't own some brewery she i throws me down. When talk back to her she calls me an old fossil und says I have one foot in der grave, und dot never in her life vhill she marry her grandfather"
 ''Und dot hurts your feelings, ehT' I says. ''Mebbe 1t does. Cobbler, be honest init me. Vhas back number? yhas on der brink of der grayeT I loog at him for two minutes. He yhas more ash seventy years old, und he looks to be ninety. I looks und looks, und den laughs und says: My boy, when you come into dis | shopa few minutes ago belief 1t yhas l 6 young man who had knocked der heel of his shoe. If you yhas over | forty five I eat cop all my sole leather und let der trust rob me some more"
 Hans, yhas depending on you" ''Und so you can, but you can never, never depend on some widow womans. 1 She like to marry you for your proper l ty. She likes to be rich und swell 1 around und have it In der papers dot she kill somebody init her automobile. l When she finds you vhas no Vanderbilt she vhas mad und speaks out. Why, I have been through dot same mill ash much ash ten times"
 'Und I vhas all right?' he says as | he begins to smile.
 1 ha -fer Y h.8A ! you shall marry twice yet before you die. Let dot selfish, disappointed wid- ! ow womans go by Texas und do you hunt oOp some young girl to be your wife"
 Hang me if I don't Say, cobbler. | your head vhas screwed on der right vhay. If talk init President Roose- i welt I don't belief he do me so much good. Take a quarter for dot patch und say nottings to nobody. When I get married I send you a bottle of i wine''
 Und den comes in young man. He | tries to be very flip ash he says he vhants some lifts put on his heels, but I can see dot he haf some trubbles on his mind. I don't say nottings, und he whistles und sings for ten minutes. Den he drops his voice down und says:
 "Cobbler, vnas you ever in love?"
 Twenty different times, my son."
 'Und did you ever ask girl to marry i youT"
 ''Der same twenty"
 ''It yhas all right if you vhas In love init girl, but how can you tell if she vhas in love init youT'
 "Dere vhas one boonered ways If dot girl lets you hold her hand while you vhas riding on der street car she vhas in love init you und you can bet on it."
 ''Yes, I think the same, but suppose she'd laugh at me when I asked her to be my wifeT
 Young man, don't you be afraid. Der good Lord put males und females Into dis world to mate. He put men und womans here to love und marry. Dere vhas some Shacks for ail der JiIls. Dot girl vhas shust as anxious to marry ash you vhas, only she must wait to be asked. How far avhay does she liveT'
 "Rlght around der corner"
 "Vhell, here vhas a pair of shoes for you to put on. You go right around der corner und ask her to be your wife"
 Lord, cobbler, but dot vhas awful soon"
 Marriage vhas like a boil. Der soon- CT 1t comes to a head der better. Don't be red in der face. Don't get der shakes. Don't stop around ash if you vhas going to have a tooth pulled. Shust walk right cop dare und be back in feefteen minutes"
 He vhas afraid, und I haf to push him outdoors, but he takes a long breath und walks off. In ten minutes he vhas back, und sooch @ happy man I never saw. He shakes me by one hand und by both hands, und he gives me half a dollar extra, und when he goes avhay joy sticks out all over him.
 Maybe make more money if vhas president of a trust und rob der peo- lples all I eosi Id. but a ieetle shop und der good will of der peoples vhas enough for me shust now. i M. QUAD.