davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01
a raettul King.
From p my Magazine.


The King OF Italy was driving his motor
car ia Rome one day, and, turning a corn
or % rapid rate, he nearly collidcd with
another motor car coming in the opposite
direction 90 himself
He pul,ei up TO apologize, and was
greeted with e storm Of indignation, the
owner Of the otAer car-an American
dressing him down ia fine style. and wind
ing mo.
'scorchers Ike YOU should be strung
up,
what b front Of the palace. for ev-
erycae TO sece said his majesty. smiling
DON'T care where roared the foreign
or $50 long Il is done properly"
q rev Jays after the latter, VINO was a
distinguished member Of American so
ciciy. was urcsen- AT an audience az the
tlGi-inal Eivel ~ he King
Fhe doors were thrown open. and. TO his
anaz Ttlt and horror, the American
found hnscs face o face with the motor
ist he bad Fo lnvehly abused few DAYS
earlier, The tca ion was painful until The
king, sm.lug advanced with outstretched
hand saying
Are an Americans as peppery as you,
Mr. E?'
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01
Atchison Globe SAINTS.

Our opinions are like our visits:
More appreciated when not forced
upon people
An editor is supposed to know every
thing, but as rule he doesn't know
anything
Every little while YOU hear man
telling about "A good cussing he gave
another man.
A girl always believes if she had
named herself she would have done a
more satisfactory job.
In almost any conversation the word
works harder than all the others
in the dictionary.
Women gossip about each other s
love affairs, but men gossip about each
others business affairs.
The fly and mosquito are a trihe late
in arriving, but don't believe the late
frost has caused them to cancel all
dates
Every woman who owns a sewing
nachne has number of attach
ments' that go with it which she never
uses
A woman who is a good cook and
Is not good looking, gets awfulIy tired
OF compliments about nothing else but
her cooking.
An amateur said today Il never re-
ceived but one good notice, and that
was written by a man who did not
see the show"
When "a man wants TO impress his
hearers with the idea that he is used
, to receiving them, he always calls a
telegram a wire
When "a woman begins talking about
q Kindred Soul. it means trouble is in
sight for her, and that she likes the
| looks Of II
If there is nothing else TO discuss.
farmers can always start an argument
about whether corn planted late or
early makes the better crop
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01
CHAPTER II.
A FORTUNE ron THE PAN.


a foRNl NE FOR THE PAIE.
Mr.. Theodore Shells carriage and
pair drew up az his house i'm Park
lane, and Mr.. Theodore shelf went up
the steps and entered the door which
man servant opened for him He
was "a stout middle aged man, with "A
clean shavcn face and a short fruck
coat OF black broadcloth He allowed
himself to be eased OF his hat and
umbrella and then passed through the
gorgeous hall 10 the rosewood billiard
room az the back There he found his
guest, AR. Patrick Cambcl IN shirt
sleeves, practicing push canuoas by
himself.
What alone. Mr.. Cambel?"
WHY yes. / Gid have a hundred up
with your niece earlier ON. but some
one came for her
Niece oh, Amy. YOU re9u-Hfiee
Rivers All, my dear sir. from the love
Wc have for her I'm this household and
| The way we treat her. YOU naturally
| fancy she is blood relation II Is a
graceful compliment tor yuu to pay.
ALr. Camlei but it is my duty to cor
rect you Miss Rivers is legally only
my ward.
Ward. oh See that? Red hard
against the cushion and white being
over the bottom pocket Neat cannon.
wasn't il, considering the long time
since I've handled a cue?"
The only child of my late partner.
You know the firm still stands as Mar
maduke Rivers & shelf We cali our
selves or the billhcadg Agents TO the
Oceanic Steam Transport company.
though of course we own The whole
line You see our flag, sir i'm every
sea.
Il know. ECrasaki to Eueros Avres.
gin and gospel on the west colst. Goals
and cotton at New Orleans"
And we DO not send our steamers
for the business of trade alone Mr.
Cambel. we pick our captains ana
officers with an eye 10 q holier purpose.
We trust that they spread Chris
tion Influence in all their ports OF call"
Yes, I saw them at work once al
AKIN on a tramp you sent down there,
Tney were taking Krooboys on board.
The skinner received them ON ono of
the bridge deck ladders with knucxIe
1uster and kicked en- along. The chief
stood b. with a monkey wrench ana
baptized en- with that as they nasse5
down the lower deck art They nar-
toned at the time that this process
had a rarely christiaui.ing frfluence
Prevented The BOYS from being uDpisb
Showed EN- what the white man could
do when ne spread himself. taught 'en1
humility I'm fact-I say. there's a null
toward this bottom pocket. Peonle bav
been sitting on the table"
Mr. Cambel. M. Cambel YOU are
M king a very serious accusation
against one OF my ships conpanies -
Accusation? Z? Never a lit OF II
The fellows only acted according to
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01
& Dold sJsp.


To overcome the wall-grounLo1 ard
,ooeo,,.I,Io ohso,+in,,s ,e az, ,,a,.o ;,,.a-'
,VdSul'.'p.G ""J''e ,o-'S "a nc ino'c ilOc-'
ilgent To inc use 0l secret. medicinal CON-
pounds, DR.. r. Y. Pierce. OF Buffalo. \.
y eo,,,o ,i,oo osro .4n,i,,o,i 4. ,-.i., = Ill
SViiiO =. ny 49, oeOi"'u ~ i-''-''c d OOil
departure from thc usual course pursued
by the makers Of put-up medicines for do
rnne.fr ueo opd ca bas nnhIiebod bro.S-
-, - 1.-ee y .-~D
cast ana oFCHiy 10 TIC Whole world inll
rnd comphstc list OF ell tho ingredients
o,tori,c i,ke.l,c co4,, ,to,, ~ Ljr ,,ridc1-,
a. ~, S'o1' " 10 " W.
decorated E1Cdlcc.es. linus nc mas taken
lis numergQs Vatrons and patients into
NE fnIl ,M,f.f/ncn Tbus 4I,o bn b,a W..
- - - 80 .-''~ w 10 Aao ~
noVeu/AlS/nealc!ncS from aMorg secret
OStrEnlF OF doubtful merits and mads
, ihprnLYc70relics Of E2lo1r7l COY1Yosftlf,17
D. .Li, IoId e.o,, n, I,5e, y y ~ -.
1llss- s!--S ~ llaa S1rS9-
4a1-tLl@l4L llu---S "
Ill, lie Is n4l -a1I11l-L 20 sDOlect tnem 70
lll-Lll Isl SeLnlnY.
Not only does the wrap~c- ~ cve--- Not.ie
y Df. Pierce's Golden Medical DIsc0vcry. the
amous medicine for weak stomach fCrpiG
ivcr or blliousness and cll catorrhal disease.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01

An actor withou. funds managed in some
way 10 get a second class ticket on a
nue Of steamships running between Sc
attic and San Francisco. The voyage CON
sumed the better part Of three days, and
I'm view Of the fact that his finances were
at low cbb, he solved The question in this
way. The first day out ne slept all day
60 keep from eating. and remained up all
night TO keep from sleeping The second
day he took physical culture exercises.
On the third day he could not stand the
strain any longer. and went down in the
dining room and ordered the best meal on
board The boat While eating this meal
he could see in his minds eye a picture
of a cell in the bastile in San Francisco.
After finishing his meal he said to the
waiter How much DO ] owe you?'
Nothing" replied the waiter" your
meals are included In your ticket"
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01

| I he Plunderers.
: J.


: in the teast. He's a gentleman dis
tlnctly"
My dear glrl, | never meant to sug-
EeSt that he was not There's no par
icular secret about his raising. He
comes Of a good west county family
Nds az Exon boy and played in their
eleven, Went through Cambridge and
aftor~ard found a berth in the diplo-
matic service. Then by way Of variety
he got engaged to be married 10 girl
VINO Tilted him. On the strength of
which he began To run wild He start
60 on six months leave for "A trip into
Tibet, but he stayed beyond the limits
OF the postal system for two wears and
a half, and when he got back 10 Eng
land the diplomatic corps found that
they could get on very well without
him So he continued his ramhles. He
doesn't seem able TO settle down"
'Ihats because ne can't forget the
girl who threw him over" exclaimed
MISS Rivers How awfully romantic!
| wonder who she was She Couldn t
have been any body nice, or she would
nj have done il, because he regular
dear And fancy his remembering her
all this time l just love him for it,"
some fellows remarked Fairfax
judiciouslE would get jealous If the
girl they were going 70 marry talked
bout another man his way"
MISS Rivers reassured him first praC-
tically and then in word You goose. p
said She, If | care for him I'm that way.
don't you see | shouldn't have spoken
about him to you at all %"
Fairfax did not answer directly He
kissed her thoughtfully and after
awhile he said: I'm not superstitiuus,
dear as a general thing Work in a
shipping Office tends 10 make one pain
fully matter Of fact But for an tnat |
wish this fellow Cambel would either
marry the queen, OF get crushed up IN
cab accident, or have himself safely
fastened down out of harms way
somewhere I've got q foreboding,
Amy that he's going 10 do "a bad turn
either to you lr TO me, which means
both Of us. | know It's absurd but
| can't get rid OF it,
How creepy" said Amy Rivers.
But what nonsense, Hamilton!"
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01
PREFACE.


=. seems to me" said philosopher
once that there are no entirely good
men in the world and none completely
bad. Single out your best man and
you will find that he lacks perfection
in some parts Of him, and examine
your worst and YOU will find that he
has at least one rcdecmng quality"
In this book the men mostly verge
toward bad but some are better than
others Because they are merely human
-hey act according TO their lights You
may meet others like them any day If
you go out and about and most of them
give extremely good dinners TIL they
are found Out you consider them
amusing. Afterwards. being better
than they. you naturally set them
down as most pCmiCious scoundrels
and shake hands with yourself and
write TO your tailor and order more
noticeable phylacteries on the next new
suit This is called Keeping up "a
healthy moral tone and does a great
deal OF good in the world
THE AUTHOR.
SCdlloTay, Shetland anGs, 1894.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01

To improve the general health, take
Garfield Tea daily for a time it purifes
the blood eradicates rheumatism and
many chronic ailments, and Keeps the
health good! Garfield Tea is made of
herbs; II is guaranteed under the Pure
Food and Drugs Law. Garfield Tea Co,
Brooklyn, y. Y
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01

The Princess de Montglyon, OF Paris
who came to America to cxhib. her beau
iful and famous collics at several kenno
shows. said az a dinner in New York
,propos of an embarrassment: THAT re
minds me OF a story they have been tell
ng lately about Queen Alexandra OF Eng
and. The Guards band was playing OF
he terrace al Windsor castle durtni
luncheon, and the queen was so pleaseS
with lively march that she sent a matt
IF honor TO inquire what it was. The mait
of honor hlushed deply rs she answered or
hcr return: Come Where the Booze j.
Cheaper, your majesty"
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01

The French war department is en-
gagged in making out lists Of motor ve-
hicles which may be regarded as avail
able in case Of war; The automobiles
are divided into three classes, accord ing
10 the carrying capacity. The census
includes the public service vehicles.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01
Not uitai
From the Philadelphia Leo

IRON the Phladephia Ledger.
- our honor, said the lawyer Cor
the accused, Il move the dismissal of
this case"
Explain your grounds to the
court
ION the simple GROUND that the tes-
timony is contradictory. The plaintiff
first said he was knocked down, and
later he was held up"
However, the court, Notwithstanding
this discrepancy, exacted heavy bail.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01
slate Of onIo. clty Of roleao. Lncas conn.

state OF Ohio, city OF Toledo. Lucas Coun.
ty SIS:
Frank ]. Cheney makes oath that he is
senior partner ~ the firm OF r. !. Cheney
Co, doing business IN the city OF To
Iedo, County and State aforesaid and that
sad nrm VIII pay the sum Of ONE III n
DKED DOLLARS for each and every case
OF latarrh that cannot be cured by the use
Of Hairs Catarrh Cure
FRANK j CHENEY
sworn 10 before me and subscribed IN my
presence, this 9th day OF December, A. II.
1886, A. w GLEASON.
tSealD Notary Public
Hans Catarrh Cure Is taken Internally.
and acts directly ON the blood and mucous
surfaces Of the system Send for testimo-
nlais, free =. J. CHENEY & CO,
Toledo, O.
Sold by al Dr1gsists 73c
Take Halls Family PMS for constipation,
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01

To he on good terms with human M
ture, BE Well Garfield Tea purides thu
blood, erudeates disease. regulates the
digestive organs and brings Good HcdHh!
Manufactured by Garfield Tea Co.,
Brooklyn. \. Y. Sold by druggists
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01

Many Elk lodges in the west have
adopted President Rooscvelt's suggeg
lion and decided to abandon the elkI
tooth emblem. Many Montana mer
have been collecting elk s teeth foi
years and holding them for rise. Ons
man AT BiIlings, Mont. has thousa nds
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01

the morning. Doan Kidney PMS help-
ed me right away, and the great relief
that followed has been permanent"
Sold by all dealers. 80 cents a box.
Foster Milburn Co. Buffalo. y. \.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01

90 @,a = Wins laupv ara sB Nervous scls--
U s9 pcro,ltrtntly urcd ll pl htl1e ore.u
Ncryc RcAtorer r.s tar rec - uUl bottle al tr1tso
Di.. H. Ia. kIINl, La sfl Atch street PhIddpl4, IA
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01
\ Warming.

II you have any room left IN your ioo
hoN, be sure and I'LL It with money. loE
,3n, on an auto tour, get aioug withom
anything but money. II there is any
ioubt about this, throw the tools away
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01
Limited 70 a Oecaee.

The physician looked grave.
Il give you" he said, but ten more
years To work"
Grinding his teeth, the actor Missed
mateyolently:
curse you, why didn't you tell me this
before? Are you aware that you have
robbed me of at least seven farewell sea-
sons?"
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01
Al. Your penlc- Tor Mems Foo

Ask Your DeaIe- tor Aliens Foot Ease
A powder - shake into yo1r shoes. It rests
the feo, Cures Corns, Bnnions, Swollen,
Sore, Hot. Gallons, Aching Sweating feet
and lLgeoWinE Nails Aliens Foot Ease
makes new or tight shoes easy sold by all
DrU@gists gDi Shoe Stores poe. sample
laai'ed FEEE Address Allen 5 Olmsted,
Lo ROY, y y
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01

woman has a queer idea abou. any
one who wears false hair unless it's
her-eIf.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01

tell OF cures made by
Doan's Kidney Pills.
John G. Coleman, a
prominent merchant
of SNJinsboro. Ga,
says For several
years my Kid II g Y $
were affected, and my
back ached day and
night | was languid,
nervous and lame in
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01
BAcKAcHE is K1DNEYAcHE

cure the Kidneys and the Pain VIII
Never Return.
Only one way 10 cure an aching back.
Cure the cause. the kidneys. Thousands
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1907-06-01
LEARN TO BE A BARBER.

SIOUX CITY P'T'e CO., 1,192-22. 1907
Lewiston evening teller. [volume] (Lewiston, Idaho) 1903-1911, 1907-08-07
ARMY CRACKS
AT SEA Grit

NEW YORK, Aug. THE seven
tenth annual Sea Grit rifle shooting
tournament will take place on the
range in New Jersey September z to
Z, inclusive. and will. as usual, consist
of rife, carbine, revolver and pistol
matches. There are 80 trophies offer
ed, some annual metches and other to
be won outright. The principal event
will be the Dryden trophy match, pre-
sented by Senator ]. F.. Dryden, to be
shot for annually. open to teams from
the infantry and cavalry of the United
States army, the navy, marine corps,
Annapolis. West Point and national
guards of the several states and terri
tories. The trophy was won ins1903 by
the United States army infantry team,
in 1904 by New Jersey. in 1905 by
Ohio, in 1905 by New Jersey.
Lewiston evening teller. [volume] (Lewiston, Idaho) 1903-1911, 1907-08-07
SEATTLE HIGH
COMING HOME
Western Boys Have Broken
All Records on Long
Trip

SEATTLE, Aug. 7.-When the mem
bers of the Seattle High school base"
ban team get back home. says the
Times, in about two weeks, after the
longest tour ever taken by any inter-
scholastic team in the world, they will
be given a reception that will warm
the cookies of their hearts. Already
plans are under way to meet the boys
with a band at the depot, and Mayor
Moore, or whoever is subbing for him
at the time, will be on hand to give
the boys a hearty welcome to their
home city.
The Seattle boys have made a Won
derful record since leaving home. They
made practically a clean sweep of the
high school teams from Seattle to New
York City. They have lost a number
of games, but they were with athletic
teams, composed or men much older
than themselves. In their own class,
the Seattle boys have shown them
selves to be the boss of the heap, and
they have a better claim than any
other high school team to the title
of champions of the United States.
While it has been generally adver-
tised through the East that the boys
were sent on the trip by the merchants
of Seattle that is true only in part. A
few merchants in the city, who liked
the way the Seattle boys handled the
game with the North Division High
school football team January l last,
helped them out with subscriptions,
but the trip itself was planned by the
boys and carried out by them.
They have so conducted themselves
while en- route as to win the praises
of critics in all parts of the country.
They have been a credit to Seattle both
by their playing and their gentlemanly
department and nowhere on the trip
was the praise more f1attering than in
Chicago. The boys were watched
closely there, for the Chicago boys dis
graced themselves in Seattle, and the
leading papers of the leading city OF
the Middle West could not say toe
many nice things about the Seattle
| boys.
The lads will be home in about TIVE
weeks, and they will be given a recep-
ton worthy a pennant winning team
They deserve it, too, for they have
broken all records for a baseball tour
and have made good in every depart.
ment.
Lewiston evening teller. [volume] (Lewiston, Idaho) 1903-1911, 1907-08-07
SEN. BEVERIDCE
WEEDS MISS EDDY
Bride Niece of Mrs. Marshall
Field==-Wedding at
Berlin

CHICAGO, H., Aug. According
to advices received here by friends Of
Miss katherine Eddy her wedding to
United States Senator Beveridge, of
Indiana, is to take place today in Ber-
lin The ceremony is to be performed
at the apartments of the brides broth
en- Spencer Eddy, on Hohenzillern
Strasse. Before the wedding there will
be a formal civil marriage at the city
registration office, in accordance with
the German law.
Miss katherine Eddy, the bride to-
Augustus N. Eddy of this city and a
niece of Mrs. Marshall Field. Her
brother, Spencer Eddy, is now secre-
tary of the American legation at the
German capital. Miss Eddy is noted
as beauty and made her social debut
four years ago. She has been edu-
Gated principally abroad, and it is said
she always has taken an intelligent
interest in public affairs.
Mr.. Beverdge is the senior United
States senator from Indiana, having
been first elected in 1899. He married
in Noember 1887, Miss Katherine Maud
Langsdale, but she died seven years
ago. Mr.. Beveridge was born in Ohio
in 1862, but has lived in Indiana the
greater part of his life. He is a grad
nate of Depauw university, and is a
lawyer by profession.
Lewiston evening teller. [volume] (Lewiston, Idaho) 1903-1911, 1907-08-07
WRESTLERS MAKE
ANOTHER MATCH

WALLA WALLA, Aug. 7.-Arrange>
wrestling match to be held in this city
Tuesday. August 20. says the Union.
between Charles Deivuk. the worlds
champion. and Ludwig Leifson, the
stocky miner who have the Austrian
such scrap in Armory hall several
weeks ago. Leifson is now working
in the standard mine in Idaho, but will
come to Walla Walla for the match
In referring to the coming contest,
Leifson, in a letter to the Union says:
Il lost on the wrestling match with
Charles Delivuk on July II, but have
succeeded in securing an even match
with HIM for August 90 and honestly
believe that l am able to get the best
of him in the second bout. for a few
convincing reasons.
The match l lost was my first one
with Delvuk. l did not know his spe-
cial manner of wrestling, was not
aware of his strong and weak points.
But took my medicine and derived a
good deal of benefit from it. A cham
pions methods are settled-he does not
mprove-whereas a young fellow like
myself. with love of the game-tried
to learn as much as possible in my last
precious experience, and will certainly
show it to the people Of WalIa Walla
who witness our next struggle"
Lewiston evening teller. [volume] (Lewiston, Idaho) 1903-1911, 1907-08-07
TIGERS To GET
FREAK FIELDER

DETROIT, Mich, Aug. 7.-Aatty
Mcintyre, who is scouting for the Tig-
ers in the Connecticut and New Eng
land leagues, has recommended a freak
outtielder to Jennings. One of his legs
is considerably shorter than the other
When he stands in the field, for SYM
metry's sake he places the long leg in
hole. When the ball is hit into his
territory he jumps out of the hole onto
his long leg and with one tremendous
stride he is under the ball.
At bat he is conundrum. He
stands on either leg. When a ball
comes shoulder high he drops to his
short leg and it's called a ball.. passing
over his head. If the ball comes rather
low, he rises to his long leg end it's be-
low the knee. When forced to hit he
can, and can beat out any old kind OF
poke by leaping down from his long
leg to his short one. One stride car
ries him within sliding distance of the
bag. once on first, there is never any
question about him making the rounds
Lewiston evening teller. [volume] (Lewiston, Idaho) 1903-1911, 1907-08-07
COACH stage
SEEKS KICKERS

CHICAGO, Aug. 7.-Director Stage
is searching for another Eckersall. At
present his inquiry extends only among
his 40 or SO eligible candidates for the
Maroon eleven this fall, but he in
tends to go through the ranks and find
drop kicker and punter to uphold
the reputation of Chicago for another
season. A Maroon eleven without a
good kicker, he says, is as abnormal
as an elephant without a trunk.
With this in mind the Midway ath-
letic tutor has sent each of his pros
pectives pigskin with a lesson on how
to boot the ball. He has asked them to
work an hour or more a day, so that
when the training season begins Sept
20 their legs will be in shape for al
early try-out. Nearly all the football
men are out of town this summer.
Stage. at the present time. is at the
proverbial ropes end for a good kick
er. No one, probably, realized more
than he did the effectiveness Of gooo
punting and goal kicking from the field
in the new game last fall, and he is ex'
! tremely anxious to round out with ;
polished kicker what now seems or
paper one of the best teams in years.