The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1907-06-27
STILL LAUGHING!

: net really thought of the bunch
. that was presented TO him S
" the representatives Of the Re
. publican party Of Utah. That g
: what the people are doing and
: every time they reflect on the
. lineup they smile.
. Why shouldn t the people
. smilei Jimmy Garfield is no
= chump. He has touched ell
: bows with the big men of the
. country from the time his dis
: tinguished father was Nation g
. idol. He knows a big man when
: he sees one. He likewise knows
: small bore,
. Cad! but he must have chuck
: led when he was brought face
: to face with the little fellows
= who are now the teeth, toe
/, nails and pin feathers of Bepub-
: hcanism in this State Now
: just look at them:
: Reed Smoot.
. Fussy Jimmy.
: Artie Thomas.
Kinkv Booth.
= Curlie Callister.
Granny Breeden.
E Sissy Thompson.
. Kernel Kaigp.
: Tommy SUD.
: Bill Spry.
= And Joncy Cutler!
: In all seriousness, does any
= one believe that bunch looked
good to Mr.. Garfield
He is from Ohio, There are
: big men in that State. There
: is not township in the Buck
: eye State from the river TO the
. lake that has not a stronger
precinct campaign committee
, than the Utah Republican lead
: ers, from Smoot down to Cut
ler Not one And it is dollars
10 dimes that Secretary Gar
; field would admit this privately
TO any friend who might raise
> the question.
Yet no man IN Utah Will dis
pute the assertion that these
are the real leaders Of the par
ty. Garfield was made scquaint-
; ed with other men, but not poll
; tical leaders. He dined with
Thomas r. Cutler, brother TO
the puny Governor, the man
whom most of the delegates In
the Republican convention
) thought they were voting for
when the tailor got on the tick
et. He is a man of force, and
If the Secretary had an oppor-
tunity to talk with Thomas r.
Cutler he must have been CON
vinced that there are brains in
the family. Likewise did the
Secretary have an opportunity
to meet the manager Of the Her
aid. No doubt he had been ad-
vIsed IN advance why that hon
or was conferred
Another newspaper man was
there, in the person of Mr..
Whitney of the News. So was
Willard Done, the Governor s
secretary and a young man of
better than mediocre ability. In
fact, the Governor depends so
fully on Willard Done that if
Willard were TO become i'll the
Governor would have TO 90 to
bed.
Is there any wonder the peo.
pie continue to laugh when
they think of this visit7 The
visit. too. was said to be for the
purpose of discovering the needs
Of the people of UTAH 1t was
emphatically denied that there
was any political significance in
the Secretary's call on this
State. Certainly not. It was
TO discover what the General
Land Office can do for us.
Now what does Smoot know
about such things that he has
not already dinned into the ex-
ecutive earl Nothing. although
some do say that if the acqui-
sition of valuable lands in Ore
gon by the Sumpter Valley rail
road, a church affair largely,
were looked into, there would
be uneasiness in certain priest
ly harems. Kinky Booth is
charged with having gotten sew
eral gentlemen in a mix-up over
public lands by illegally advis-
ing them. He wouldn't It do to
tie to, Fussy Jimmy is too
crooked to be deeply relied up
on. Sissy Thompson wouldn't
tell if he knew, and Artie
Thomas was never accused of do
ing an unselfsh thing in his
life.
OF course, no one would think
of asking Granny Breeder for
an opinion on the law or any
thing else, il it were the inten-
tion to follow his advice Ker-
mel Kaign was good Kernel,
and Callister, 'Ull and Spry
play Mormon politics all tho
time and could not advise any
one on anything else,
How, then, can il be said that
the visit of Secretary Garfield
let any light into his official
chambers If so, from whence
came it'
Jimmy Garfield deserved bet
ter. So did Utah deserve better.
He would have thought better
of the entire State had he been
better chaperoned.
Suppose George Lawrence,
Steve Love, Benper X. Smith,
Heber M. Wells and men Of
their character and type had
been in charge of the Secre-
tary and that he had been in
troduced to the independent Re
publlcans and Democrats of
Utah instead Of the bunch Of
ninety five Founders he did meet,
would be not have received a
better impression of the impor-
t,nna of +ha ant,ro