davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
She sauelched Him.

Miss Ellabelle Mae Doolittle, the
Leesville poetess, effectively squelched
young man at a dance the other
night. Miss Doolittle, when the fad
first became fashionable, was oper-
ated on for appendicitis and the
young man knew this. In waltz she
had with him he said:
Miss Doolittle, it seems to me you
dance better since you had your APP
pendix cut out"
SIS that SOL" replied the great poet
ess.
Eyes" he said.
WELL" came from Miss Ellabelle
Mae, why don't you have yours cut
out?"
Wasn't that O hot one?-Denver
Post,
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
Little Chance For Him.

A Winfield woman complained at
our Office to-day because we made
known the fact yesterday that the
comet story is fake. She said that
she had her husband about in the no.
ton of joining the church, but that
we had sidetracked him. Now, we
don't pretend to be the judge of any
mans salvation, but we are firmly OF
the opinion that any individual who
waits for comet to strike him be-
fore he repents has slim chance for
redemption.-Winfeld (Kan.) Free
Press.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
The Cheese.

s'The late General Thomas H.
Ruger," says Stamford man, was,
like many army officers, an authority
on good cooking, but he detested
rank, high cheeses. At dinner he
said that very rank cheese was once
left at his headquarters, to be called
for, and after it had remained un-
claimed two days he posted up this
notice:
If the cheese sent here addressed
to Private Jones is not called for in
two days it will be shot. Wash
ington Star.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
Sores Behind Ears Spread to Cheeks
Best Doctors Fail-But Cuti-
cura Remedies Effect Cure.

ri had been troubled with eczema for
Eve years on my ear and it began to extend
on my cheek. had been doctoring with
the best physicians, but found no relief
whatever As the medicines and salves did
me no good l thought would get the
Magic Three Cuticura Soap, Cuticura
Ointment and Cuticura Pills, costing me
one-half of one visit to my physician.
can truthfully state that / found instant
relief When ! had used three boxes of
Cuticura Ointment and two cakes of Cuti-
cura Soap found my skin as soft and fine
as baby's Miss Meta Ayers, l3l Frank
lin Ave, Brooklyn, N. ", Sept. ! and
Is, 1902
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
His Income.

The teacher of a Sunday-school
class in Wilkesbarre once put the fol-
lowing questions to new scholar:
What did Moses do for a living
while he was with Jethro?"
There was a long silence, during
which the other members Of the class
took occasion to "size up" the new
conner The latter, however, was un-
dismayed After due reflection he
answered:
Please, ma am, he married one OF
Jethro's daughters. Harper's
Weekly.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
Bumper Crop.

"Ya-as, said the man from South
ern Kansas. Il reckon that year was
what you might call a banner year
with a bumper wheat crop. wy, do
you know that Sile Edwards-neigh-
Dor O. mine, Sile was-had SIGH a
stand O. wheat on a ten-acre field o.
hisn'n that he had t. rent tn field
next t i'm t. shock about half of it
7waassa' 4 room fer tn shocks on tn
ground it growed on. Judge.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
Cherish the Poetry of Love.

Laugh not at what some call the
extravaganza of the young lover. 1t
is the true business of love to IDEAL
lie, to glorify its object. The pity is
that love should ever lose its poetry
and descend into the region of prose-
That is the destruction of all the
beauty if not of all the happiness be-
tween lovers, the open gate to the di-
vorce court among married people,
Western Methodist.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
March.

March is named from Mars, the god
of war. The old Romans called March
the first month of the year, SO it is
very good month for lis to mend all
the good resolutions we have broken
since New Years, and to make war
against whatever is keeping us from
being the very best that we can be.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
mo- Mend Hot Water BAGS.

A hot water bag will Outlines sud-
denly spring leak when most need
ed. A piece of adhesive plaster
placed over the break will stop the
leak Immediately and will stay in
place for quite while. 1t can easily
be renewed and proves most salts
factory first aid to an injured rubber
article.-The Circle.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
SHOT PRISONER IN CELL.
Fire Chief of Franklin, Ohio, Kills
Man Who EIoped With His wife.

Dayton, Ohio.-Fire Chief B. H
Millner, Of Franklin, shot and in
stantly killed ]. H. Little, who re-
Gently eioped with his wife and who
was returned to Franklin for trial
Miliner entered the police station
and going directly to Littles cell fired
two shots which lodged In the Victims
breast,
Millner became raving maniac
and was put under guard.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
The Missouri Hen.

The farmers wives and daughters
Of Missouri marketed LOT, 155,658
dozens of eggs last year, for which
they received more than $4,000, 200.
Added to this are the items of live
and dressed poultry and feathers,
making the comfortable sum of near
ly $40, 100000 for poultry products
for the last year.-St. Louis Repub-
lie.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
a. -
Diabolical Invention.

A staircase has been invented
which plays tunes as it is walked up
and down upon. A series of pins is
pressed by the feet and play songs
and drums, while other are connected
with collapsible chambers, which
blow various instruments.-Kan
City Star.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10

early summer that the long, cold
spring would bring disaster to the
crops, it is now assured that nature
once more will bless this country
with abundant harvests. 1t is true
that the phenomenal yield of corn and
wheat last year may not be quite
equalled, but it is also true that the
output will exceed the average of re-
cent years, and at the same time the
increase in the value of farm products
is likely to far more than Offset the
decline in the aggregate yield.
There may be a decrease in wheat
of possibly 75,0O0,0O0 bushels, but
with the price more than twenty cents
a bushel above the corresponding
time last year there ought to be
net increase of SIS, 900, 900 to $780,
100000 in the value of the wheat
crop over that of 1906. With an in
crease in the price of corn and cotton,
the falling off in these crops likewise
doubtless will be Offset by their high
err values. Thus the farmers of the
country are once more blessed with
vast income-an income so great as
compared with five or six years ago
that it is difficult to comprehend the
magnitude of the gain. The value of
farm products in different years has
been as follows.
Years.
1880. Observation-Disclosures. 1927, 900 900
1890. ......................, 2,466, 000, 600
1900. ............., 4,7l7 ,000, O00
1905. CAS- 900
l906. ;:...,.......... 6,194 ,000
1907 (estimated) ............, 7,OO0,O0O,OO0
The increase in the last seven years
of $2,283, 100000 is gain of nearly
fifty per cent in that time This
gain in seven years is almost equal
to the total value of the farm pro-
ducts of the country in 1890, In the
latter year the per capita production
of all engaged in agriculture was
$287, almost exactly the same as in
1880, while at the present time the
per capita of all engaged in agricul-
ture is about $500.
The prosperity of the farmers is
seen not only in the paying off of
hundreds of millions of farm mort
cages and in the building of better
homes, but also in the heavy deposits
in the country banks throughout the
West and South. Every banker in all
the agricultural regions of the coun-
try has been impressed during the
last few years with the great increase
in the deposits of farmers, and in
many portions of the South large
proportion of the deposits in country
banks is made up of surplus accumu-
lations of the agricultural classes.
With such fundamentally sound con-
ditions it is scarcely possible for the
country again to sink into the depths
of panicky times such as we have had
in the past,
So far as the South is concerned. it
is quite safe to count that this section
will receive for it's cotton and cotton
seed an aggregate of $500, 900.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
For Appearances ONLY.

Little Fred-"Why is 1t that wom-
en- are always complaining about
their servants?"
Little EIsie-"Oh, that's just to let
people know they can afford to have
'ems"-C Chicago News.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10

lions. My doctor kept me on a strict
diet, but as his medicine was not
me, began using Doans
Kidney Pills. They helped me at
once, and soon all traces of sugar dis
appeared. have regained my former
weight and am perfectly WELL"
Sold by all dealers. SO cents box.
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
Professor ChaufYeur.

The King of Spain has created
chair of automobilism at l'Ecole des
Arts ct Sciences at Madrid. The pro-
fessor will be expected to give all the
practical and theoretical instruction
young chauffeurs require.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
The Gun Badge.

The Alabama Legislature will pres
emily consider bill providing that
any person who carries pistol must
take out license and wear a neat
metal badge with the word ARMED"
thereon.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
WomanIy Intuition.

A small girl and her mother were
watching monkey perform in front
of show tent. The monkey had
jumped on the showman's back and
was hugging him when the girl said
"He knows his papa, don't he, man.
ma ?"-Chicago Tribune.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
Water Remarkably Pure.

The water of Loeb Katrine, in
Scotland, is wonderfully pure. 1t
holds only quarter-pound of alluvial
deposit to every 1000 gallons of wat
er. The Thames averages four
pounds to the 1000 gallons.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
NO TAX FOR LIBRARY.
Town Refuses to Support Bookless
Carnegie Gift.

Tahlequah, Indian Territory. AT
a special election here proposed tax
to maintain the Carnegie library was
defeated, The library building cost
a year ago, but has been bookless to
date. Wifi 2 population of only
1000, most Of the citizens felt IL
brary tax would be too great. The
question divided the town into two
factions.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
Graft in Iceland.

Why can't this grated country
get some immigration from Iceland,
where there have been but two thefts
in 1000 years? But is there any
thing in Iceland worth stealing ?-St.
Louis Post-Dispatch.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
LiberaIity.

Little Jimmy, who had just re-
ceiyed a box of mixed candy, passed
it around to treat the family, saying:
Help yourself to all the choco-
lates you want. l don't like them. :"
Judge.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
WORN TO A SKELETON.
A Wonderful Restoration Caused a
Sensation in Pennsylvania
Town.
Mrs Charles N. Preston, of Ell
land, Pa, says: "Three years ago

found that my house
work was becoming a
burden. / tired cas-
lily, had no ambition
and was failing fast.
My complexion got
yellow and 1 lost
over so pounds. MY
thirst was terrible,
and there was sugar
in tha Lridnov onoro-
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
Germany,s Three Bip cities.

The three largest German cities are
Berlin, with a population of over
100000; Hamburg, with 100000,
and Munich, with about $4,000.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
Liberia a Healthy Region.

The white population in Liberia ia
showing notable increase. 1t has
been found that African fevers are
less frequent and deadly there than
in other regions.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
Recipe For Happiness.

We can have the highest happiness
only by having wide thoughts and
much feeling for the rest of the world
as we'll as for ourselyes.-George
Eliot.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
Baltic Sea Has Most wrecks.

The wreck record of the Baltic Sea
is greater than that of any other part
of the world. The average is one a
day throughout the year.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
Three Possessions.

Love, JOY and peace are the things
that make mans life. Possession
of these three make him most like
Christie. e. Hughes.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10

Fine edged tools lose their temper
if exposed to the light of the sun for
considerable length Of etme.-Tit-
Bits. N.Y.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
What He Knows.

A young man just out of college
knows good deal, except about how
to earn living. -Somerville Journal.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10

Mrs. Winslow's Soothing Syrupfor Children
teething, softens thegums, educesintlamma-
ton, allays pain, cures wind collie, Csc a bottle
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10

The new Cunarder Lusitania will con-
sumo 1900 tons of coal day.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10

H. H. GREENS Sons, of Atlanta, Ca, are
the only successful Dropsy Specialists in the
world. See their liberal offer in advertise
ment in another column of this paper.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10

FITS, st. Vitus' Dance, Nervous Diseases per.
manently cured by DIR. Kline's Great Nerve
Restorer. 50 trial bottle and treatise free.
Dr. IL r Kline Id 93l Arch St Phila Pa
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10

New South Wales has bought 1000 miles
of rabbit-proof wire netting.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
ENDUREs ECZEMA S YEARS.

Burbank, the "plant wizard" grows l2,-
600 varieties of potatoes.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10

MIR. 81. J. Henneman, Oakland, Neb..
writes: II waited before writing to you
about my sickness, catarrh of the stomach,
which | had over a year ago.
There were people who told me it would
cured for DO not feel any S more 'nas eeeta
have a good appetite and am getting fat.
So am, and win say to all, am cured
for good.
u thank you for your kindness.
/" Pe7.u7tG tUtEL be our house ntedi-
cine hereafter.n
Catarrh Of the stomach is also known in
common parlance as dyspepsia, gastritis
and indigestion No medicine will be of
any permanent benefit except it removes
the catarrhal condition.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10

An enterprising American has begun tt
manufacture cement tombs.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
Gained Strensth and Flesh.

Miss Julia Butler, R. R. 4, Appleton,
Wis, writes she had catarrh Of the stom.
ach, causing loss of sleep and appetite, with
frequent severe pains after eating. She
took Peruna, her appetite returned, she
gained strength. flesh and perfect health.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-10
PUTNAM FADELE SIS DYE S
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Color more goods brighter faster coors tnan any
dye any garment without ripping apart Write for m
Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1907-06-04
BELIEVES IN A BIG
NOISE ON FOURTH
Manager Chadbourne of the
Traction Company Is Going
to Have a Genuine Old Fash
toned Celebration.

81 am not one Of those people VIII
believe in shutting off the small boy
on the Fourth Of July said Manager
NJ. o, ~Chadbourue of the Traction
company Monday night. at seems to
mo the more noise we make on the
Fourth the greater Is the patriotic I'M
preston we make on the young mind.
II does not seem to me that q tame
speech is going to make The average
tcn-year-old think much of Washing
ton and the Revolutionary heroes but
give him "a fireworks design showing
Washington on horseback and some
cannon crackers on the side. and tho
lad Is going TO think a lot about tn
father OF his country
1t may be remarked In passing thar
Mr. thadbuurne Is rapidly becoming
an authority on the training Of the
American small boy.
I'VE are going 10 have a genuine.
old-iashioncd Fourth OF July celebra-
ton at Traction park this year. There
will be races and q basc ball game in
the afternoon and at night We viii give
a free exhibition of fireworks which
win be worth going q long ways to
see. There VIII be no charge for adj
mission To the grounds and NO cNpens 3
VIII he spared 20 give q FIRST class
display The band win play patriotic
music aud 1 am going to make ID my
special business Ia have some rockets
which Will land on the other side OF
the volcanoes.
Mn. C%hadbouruc has had cousidcra-
bic experience I'm the handling of
fireworks and will take personal
charge of the exhibition.
Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1907-06-04

the express purpose Of locating the
shops and divisions On the Belen cut
Off. These shops VIII doubtless be lo-
Gated at or near the eastern terminus
of the cutoff. which is TeXico. feXico
and Farwcll. clovis and Amarillo are
each looking eXpectant-Estanciu
News.
Extensive improvements are being
made 10 the santa Zee Central depOts
at Estancia, Mortarty and elsewhere.
Two brand new Mexican Central en-
pincs from the Baldwin Locomotive
works. Nos g17 and 91S, arrived here
yesterday on ibcit way 10 lei Paso.
The concrete work m the new two
story Santa Fc depot at Willard is
nearly completed. and the building
viii soon be ready for the carpenters
and the tile roof workers.
Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1907-06-04
FOUND A TENDERFOOT
ALONG THE PECOS
Texas Stockmnn Advise Carlsbad
Shinpcr How Z q Get Cars.

c.. NJ. CLICK is just hack from @ trim
to Carlsbad ". NJ. where Dc went o.
look at q bunch of about 200 horses.
SAYS the Antonio Express. "Thc ouu
try up There is dry said ne Friday.
land dry Weather prevails i'm % Pc
cos valley from there down 90 PcCo-.
7 ieund onr man mp there on the Pc
cos valley road north of Pecos VIII,
had been holding a bunch of cattle fof
thIrty-ouc days waiting for cars. ] sur
missed chat he was a tcnuerfoot and
wa. mol .Ver, we'll posted an how Ca
make tho Texas roads get a move on
them. ! suggested b statutory de-
mand to him which had been used
with such satisfactory results down
this way. and he at once became intor-
esled. I have not heard from there
since 7 left hut if they haven't beer
getting some IF the recent rains ~
have had down here. the country is in
very bad shape"
Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1907-06-04

DON'T lot your child suffer with
that cough when y1u elu ,urc 70 with
NJlIaris Hurchouud syrup 20 sure
,ure Tor Coughs bronchitis. IuUu-
on.a. Group and Pulmonary Diseases
BuN Is bottle and trl d.
o. k. Laughter. BNLaIi8. Miss
writes % have two children who
bad Group / tried many different
remedies. but I must sHN your uurc-
hound syrup i~ the best Group and
Cough medicine / ever used" Sold
by j. %. O'Blcliy CO.. .
Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1907-06-04

AllH'id. run u'N'dN dIih N'Nii'
day.
4. H. Miller Is here from Estancia
on business matters.
r. II. Sims. Of the valley ranch or
tho Pecos. was In the city Yesterday.
DR.. Shadrach viii be In his office
this morning after n ten days' Illness
A NJ. Espiuosl loft yesterday
morning on train 40. q for Chicago
on % business trim.
County Commissioner g. +, Spader.
Of SandoVal county. came In from
Brrnallllo yesterday.
superintendent John w. sullivan, Of
the Hugan coal mines, was an arrival
in the city yesterday.
Gus Theliu. Toby Corcoran and 9th
ers left yesterday overland for an out
ing iu the demeZ country.
County Superintendent of schools
j.. r. silva. Of S|audoval county, was
here from Bernalillo yesterday.
William H.. Chamberlin, Lon EMS
ana Miss Carpenter were arrivals
from Madrid coal camp Yesterday.
Miss Roberta Langlnnd, q niece Of
Mrs. Belle Lee, 800 South broadway,
viii leave tonight for san Francisco
Cal.
Thomas Seward. Of the Mutual Ben
eft Life Insurance company, returns
today from an extended southern
triu.
Thomas Lapsley, cashier at the Al
vurado, left last night for Los An
peles. whore he accepts a position in
q hotel,
senator Ben r Tillman. OF South
Carolina, was IN The city a few min
utcs early sunday morning on his way
90 Los Angeles.
Misses Margaret and Hannah
Roach, OF 40 South Fdith street, left
last night to spend the summer
months In Trinidad. Colo.
Byron Harvey. of the Harvey sys-
tom, was tn Albuquerque for q short
time last night on his way to Cali
fornia. accompanying his family who
viii spend the summer on the coast
Deputy United states Marshals
Harry Cooper and W. r. Forbes have
returned from AlamoRordo, whore
they attended the session Of United
states court.
A. w. shaw. connected with the le-
EHl department of the bureau Of for
estry wan In the city yesterday on bus
incss with Supervisor Hugh ~ Harris
of the Man2ano reserve.
r. w. De Wolf has returned home
from attending military school Mrs.
De Wolf, the wcll-known musician,
who has been seriously IN for a few
days. is now eouvaloscing.
Professor Julius Hurter. curator of
the Academy OF Science Of 50. Louis.
vino is collecting southwestern rep
Tiles for the museum Of that lustitu-
tlou. left last night for the Fortified
Forest, after an extended stay here.
Charles Rossi, bartender at Stur-
ges, who was attacked by "a drunken
Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1907-06-04

AZ this season Of the year the first
unnatural l~oosruess of q child's bow
els should have immediate attention.
The best thing that can hc given is
Chambcrlain's collie. Cholera and
Diurrhoca Remedy followed by castor
ul as directed with each bottle OF the
remedy. For sale by am druggists. 49,
Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1907-06-04
There's a Good
Deal Of
Satisfaction

to us in selling Hart Schaffner
~ Marx cIotheSi not SO much
for the profit we make on
them but chiefly for the profit
our customers make on them,
You know how it Isl if you
1can do somebody else good
get a benefit for yourself
AT the same time, you really
'feeI pretty good over it, That's,
fthe way we feel about selling
Hart, Schaffner & Marx
every time we sell a
suit or OyerCoat of that famous
Iiner we're doing good to our
fellow men,
Honest all = wool fabric8i
honest, clean, sanitary tailor
ingi the best StyIel the most
perfect fit clothes that will
render SerVice-aII under the.
SChaffner & Marx LABEL
here,