Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-02-18

right I shall never call him q robber again. might have been ill my grave ln day or two more but for him. He didn't say the elixir was good for Rheumatism, but I'm going to try' It. You never can tell what an elixir Will do until you've emptied the jug.
 Have tried it and feel much better Danced a jig when I came back up stairs. Cat looked at me in astonish- ment, but what's q dilrned old cdt got to do with it: Cook has just gone to bed, and I'm all alone down hanc. While pity the poor woman and while she looked at the jug appealinely, I'm not going to peddle the elixir around. Charity begins at home.
 Just had a fit of laughing. Can't say what it was about, but the man who wants to leave this rosy old world is fool. l just feel friendly toward every living thing.
 Il suppose that after they have boil ed the barks and roots down they put ill hard cider, but 1 don't know or care. All I know is that it has cured my rheumatism in about fifteen min utes. Never saw anything act like it before.
 Cures Many Things.
 Plumber didn't say the elixir would cure the kidney complaint, but I'm go- ing to try it. Never be surprised at anything an elixir does. Cat looks at me reproachfully, but
 Have taken another dose. Warm glow. Heart large and liberal. If an old tramp should call now I'd give him my shoes. Have told the cat I think just as much of him as if he was a baby, but he seems to doubt the state ment. Got up to go over and stroke his back. but the floor rose up under me and l had to sit down again That may be the elixir's way of curing kid ney complaint, and I ain't saving a word.
 Just got through singing Old Black Joe Mrs. Bowser ought to have been here and felt the house tremble Some one opened the door, and I thought it was her, but it was policeman. Said he'd give me the collar if didn't hush Flushed and gave him dose of tho elixir to cure his cold feet We winked at each other and laughed. He said it was the best ever and that I might sing the roof off the house if l want ed to.
 ''Been playing the strong man with the chairs. The elixir gives a man a heap of muscle.
 Treated the Policemen.
 "Went out to the gate bareheaded to look for Mrs. Bowser. Couldn't see her anywhere, and sang The Old Oaken Bucket Two policemen came along and told me to shut up or they would have me in the jug. Speaking of jug reminded me, and I brought out the elixir. When they had drunk they patted me on the back.
 'I can stand in with elixir, and ! stand in with the police, and so who cares for who cares?
 Don't remember whether the plumb CT said the elixir was good for liver complaint or not, but have just trie.l it. Always give an elixir fair show and it will give you one.
 Have just found myself weeping Can't tell what for. Nobody dead and! no mortgage on the house, but wepi. Cat didn't seem to be any more aston ished than when laughed. Is there one cat or two or three? Is it the room whirling around or me? It may be that I ought to have taken more elixir, but
 Mir. Bowser's diary ended there, The cat was ill the house when l reach ed home, but he was not to be found. The jug was there, but there was only about a pint of the elixir left. Mir. Bowser had taken his overcoat and hat and gone. It is twenty-four hours since he disappeared, and still no word. Any one observing a short, fat man sitting ln a snowdrift or doorway and weep ing will please speak kindly to him and lead him home. Say to him on the way that there will be no row raised over his return. There Is some elixir left. and he can go right on dosing himself for consumption and appendicitis, THE MRS. BOWSER.
 Per M. Quad.