The independent., 1907-03-14

What is the tariff on coal?
Anthracite is free Bituninous Goa!
must pay 81 cents ton.
M
N DRIFTWOOD IS
MssAR
Ninety per cent Of the talks put up by
public officials area mere waste OF words.
If you feel poorly and think you ought
to take something for ii, try taking a
walk. 1t will do you good.
No man is of such Importance to the
community that he cannot be spared,
though it might hurt his feelings to tell
him SO.
A Pittsburg alderman sent to the pen
iteT;tiary to serve three years for bribery
If that sort of thing becomes contagious,
look out, boys!
For some reason most people along the
New England coast are In favor Of the
strip subsidy. Can it be that this, too,
Is only a local issue?
Say, my DEAR dying friend, If you will
take exercise instead of pills the chances
are you will be able to fool the under
taker for many years to come.
II speaks well for Prosecutor Jerome
that he was kindly consderate Of the
one prominent figure In the Thaw trial
for whom everybody feels sorry.
Just our luck-the other day we paid a
farmer twenty cents for eggs and before
night the merchants combine had let
the price down to eighteen cents.
With a pledge that the Thaw family
will go into permanent retirement we
would be heartily In favor of the fellow
who did nothing more reprehensible than
to butcher one Of his kind
In northern California everything dates
from the great earthquake, either before
or after. 1t Is said, for instance, that
p. X. Ellis located in San Jose thirty
three years before the earthquake
Lincoln doesn't claim to be a great
commercial center, but the bank clear
ings last week we're heavy enough to
make such cities as Wichita and Topeka
wonder what Is going on up here.
We have a very dear friend who thinks
that Washington, ID. c., Is the Mecca of
American civilization and that we should
all turn our faces in that direction when
please.
Don't harbor the fool notion that in
order TO be successful 1t Is neces-
sary to pile UP a heap Of money
for which you can have no possible use
except to call 1t your own. 1t is all
borrowed and must be put back.
An orthodox church member of this
city, i'll view of what is coming to light
III the circles of high finance declares
unless r. H Hartman and those of his
stamp are booked for hell, it isn't worth
while to keep the place up any longer
Nebraska man who was recently
rewarded fer much waiting by a post
Office appointment well worth waiting for,
now testfies that 1.-THE righteous are
never forsaken' though 1t looked for a
time as though there might be an ex-
ception TO the rule in his case.
A Milwaukee man was granted a di-
vorce because his wife was addicted to
the popcorn habit She always had a
sack of it handy when retiring and kept
her hsband awake by munching it when
she ought TO have been asleep
Therell be M sunday games OF ball
In this mans town this year But you
may hear the nmpirs call on other days,
where Sunday balls ih style. the trip
each way-praised be he saw--wll cost
two cents ruile.
Astronomers are apprehensfve OF dire
flii results IL the great comet now headed
this way doesn't shift its course IL IL
due 10 make landing about March a.
III the man We owe for ton OF hay will
defer collecting the bill until the first
of April the favor will be gratefully APP
preciated
Al the age of eighty years Ex-Governor
Horace Roles Of Iowa is said TO be- In the
pink ~ health and as much in love with
life Hs he ever was " doesn't say
what brand IT whisky he has used but
n Is evident De- has taken no more than
enough a. maintain his standing III the
democratic party
ln statue the state superintendent ~
ruhhe Instruction w trying 10 Interest
tine iaw makers and the people IN favor