Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-07
The Greater Need.

Allen Updegraff, Yale poet and ex-jani-
tor of Upton Sinclair's Helicon Hall col
ony, was talking in Baltimore about his
long trampng expedition to the Fiji Is
lands.
Crossing the continent" said Mr.. Upde
graft, II shall fraternize with the tramps 1
meet on the way. l find tramps interesting
In many things they are learned, and they
are often intelligent and witty.
II once had the acquaintance Of a witty
tramp In New Haven. He told me one day
Of a passage at arms he had just had with
an old philanthropist.
stopping the old man, the tramp said
kind friend, will you give me the price
of loaf of bread? l have not tasted food
for two days.
THE old man at once gave the tramp a
nickel. Then he proceeded on his way.
But at the next corner he saw the tramp
| come forth from saloon wiping his lips
on his coat sleeve, and he said Indignantly:
You are a pretty fellow! You told me
you hadn't tasted food for two days, and
when 1 give you nickel you go and spend
1t on beer
But boss said the tramp. I hadn't
The Length Of Eternity.
J Mrs c. w. McCulloch Of Chicago, on TAX
ing up her new office of justice of the peace,
told Chicago reporter that in the per-
Torrance of marriage ceremonies she pro-
posed to omit the word obey.
I'm these enlightened days" said Mrs.
McCulloch, the word obey has lost its
| meaning in the marriage contract. The best
wife does not propose to obey her husband
| any more than the best husband proposes to
| obey his wife. Obedience is for dogs,
| horses-creatures without reason.
so 1 think we should drop this mean
| ingless word-as meaningless a certain
| other word was to certain boorish hus-
| band.
THE husband had been particularly
nasty one rainy Sunday at home, and his
| wife finally began to cry.
| Eight years ago. she sobbed, you swore
| eternal love, and now"
| "'Oh, groWled the man, how long do
you expect eternal love to last, any way?' B"
The Bolt Didn't Know.
| Attorney General Jackson of New York
was criticising in Albany a certain excuse
! that had been offered him.
1T was slim excuse he said 1T re-
| minds me of the excuse of the lightning
| rod agent.
"In the days when all the world swore by
| lightning rods a farmer had two costly ones
put upon a new barn. But only week or
! STORM the barn was struck and in a few
| hours all that remained of 1t was a heap of
| charred black refuse.
| Next day the farmer sought out the
| lightning-rod agent.
| "'Fine lightning rods you sold mel he
| shouted. Here's my new barn been struck
| and burned to ashes!
What? said the agent. Struck by
lightning?'
| Ives, sir, by lightning
| I'm the daytime?'
| "'No, at night-last night
1.-The agents puzzled frown relaxed a
| little.
An he said. ut was a dark night,
| wasn't it?'
"'Of course it was said the farmer. 1t
| was pitch dark
Were the lanterns burnlng?'
| What lanterns"'
1.-The agent looked amazed, incredulous.
| why, he said. you don't mean to tell
me that you didn't run up lanterns on the
| rod; on dark nights?'
! 81 never heard of such a thingr shouted
the farmer Run lanterns up! Why
| well said the agent, If you don't
know enough to keep your lightning rods
| showing you can't blame me-
In Fly Time.
Grand Exalted Ruler Melvin of the Elks