Goldsboro weekly argus. [volume] (Goldsboro, N.C.) 1885-1909, 1907-02-14
As We GO ALONG.
Snapshots, Witty, Wise and Other
wise.

wise.
New Jersey took Briggs and discard
ed Griggs. Not much difference any
way.
Some men never rise in the world
because they are afflicted with chronic
dizziness.
Mr. Bryan ha adopted a Japanese
fornia vote.
He who does things may make mis-
takes, but he who does nothing makes
a big mistake. +,
This isn't such a bad old world after
all. Just think of what might happen
that never does.
The folks who have been wanting an
o~ld-fashioned winter are ready to adopt
a new spring style.
Of course Foraker thinks differently
when it comes to giving official plums
to the colored men of Ohio.
1r0SlO0nG 6OOSON0lt dHd CuoSc
Parker have gotten together at last
on the Brownsville matter.
The Senate has agreed to vote on the
Smoot case on February Goth, if they
can recall what it was about.
Some people are so curious that they
wonder what the world would do if the
supply of salt should be cut off.
Somebody has figured that the voy-
age of Columbus cost 5 1900, but he err
tainly had a good run for his money.
The Kaiser was hit by a SNOWFALL,
but so long as it wasn't a bomb he just
shook his finger at the offending small
boys.
It is a pity that all the critics knock
ing Shakespeare can't be put to work
blowing or doing some other useful
work.
Mr.. Shonts says that be resigned be-
cause his work is DONE. Let US, there
fore, go down and AXE a ride through
our canal.
Even Oklahoma has a millionaire
What is the matter with the wild and
woody west, anyway?
The Standard Oil officials still be-
liev that it is-as old Simon Cameron
put it-''better to ride a hundred miles
than to write a letter."
John D. Rockefeller attached a string
even at this it is a staggering amount
to give away at n time.
Persons who are willing to spend an
hour in giving you verbal advice
couldn't find time to write down one
little rule for you OIL paper.
If Delaware is to continue the whip
ping post for wife heaters n tax
bachelors, what show will man have
in that little State after this?
A Cincinnati preacher says he
would rather bet on a horse race than
play euchre for a prize, which shows
that he knows real sport when he strikes
it.
The Pullman:porter found a live bomb
the other day in the lower berth of his
| car. So it seems that the Anti-Tipping
Society is at last getting down to bust
ness.
Then, again, the American people
may be devided into classes by q new
criterion-those who are victims of
railroad wrecks and those who anage
to escape.
Nowadays fame seizes a person, jerks
him out into the limelight, turns him
round for the world to view and then
! chucks him into a corner. Now, there
is Nicholas Longworth-.
The gift of $32, 900 900 by John D.
Rockefeller has not yet been followed
by an advance in the price of oil, but
there is reason to believe the consumer
will have to pay it in the long run.
A learned scientist makes the asser-
ton that people who drink whisky
simply charge themselves with cleo
tricity. This may account for those
shocking headaches on the morning
after.
One of the men who was dismissed
from the Thaw jury is a photographer.
The prosecution must have been afraid
that when asked if be considered the
defendant guilty he would return an
answerin the negative.
kmnpira a World pAwnP.