The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1907-02-26

Talk about tricks and tribulations
In trade! The real estate business may
be hkened to boarding house mince
pie-made up of conglomeration of
fearful and awful Thugs, raisins full
Of grit, cttron full of worms, antedi-
luvian meat, mouldy apples and rancid
wine. In the beglnning-for every
thing must have beginning real
estate agent is like man in rattle
snake den; he must look in every d.
rection at once, and keep up a con-
tinual hopping lest he gets bitten. He
may escape for a time and enjoy
glorious run of prosperity and sum
shine; then, without warning, some
thing cold and clanmy winds around
his throat and well nigh chokes the
courage out of him, but after a few
weeks experience with kaleidoscope
humanity he educates himself to sup
pose that every dove is devil. Then
he is never taken aback except when
he finds a thing is what it repre-
sents itself to be. Some one said:
ut is as impossible for a man to be
cheated by any one but himself as it
is for thing to be and not to be at
the same time" According to this
philosophy, mans carelessness and
negligence are responsible for his con-
tinued unsuccess and loss.
Some Experiences.
"Tell one of my real estate exper-
fences? Well, when 1 first started
into business l worked like Trojan,
listing property. 1t was summer, and
hot. rode miles and miles on. my
wheel, going from house to house So
Letting, until I had my books we'll
filled with fine line of houses and
lots. One day fellow who looked
prosperous enough to be the owner
of a park, or a seaside skating rink,
called He said he wanted to look
at some 'snaps'-houses, lots, business
property, anything. He looked pretty
good to me. hustled out my lists,
ran over them, selected of the best,
then ordered a horse from the livery
q was too poor to own a horse at
that time) and took him all over the
city. talked things up until my
CAAO was SOIC. 11C ACpL Ills AOLC-
book out and made a memorandum of
everything l showed him. When we
parted he thanked me and told me
he would let me know his decision in
a few days. Shortly afterward he
opened an Office of his own. had
good notion to send him my livery
bill, also an apothecary's bills for a
throat gargle."
"You ask me If there are any annoy
ances in my business?" said another
real estate dealer. He clenched his
fists, and l fancied there was an oath
or two hidden somewhere behind his
heavy mustache. did you ever hear
of an apple that worms wouldn't get
into?" he asked. well, if you really
must see one of the skeletons in my
closet of finance here she is. The
worst people l have to contend with
are women. l think, sometimes,
will put out sign, Men Only just
to protect myself. Last week lady
came in in great hurry. She acted
like she wanted to catch train, or
something, so 1 made haste to ask
what could do for her. She spoke
rapidly, without pausing between
times. She said she wanted to buy Il
house and lot with bath room street
work all in, china cupboard, sewer
connection, tinted walls, bungalow
style, cellar, stationary tubs, polished
floors, barn, beamed ceiling, chicken
corral, about six or twelve rooms
would answer, If 1 didn't have any,
thing else. She said she must buy
that afternoon, as she was renting,
and the lease would run out week be-
fore last, or something to that effect
Well, helped her into the auto and
of we went. l showed her six-room
house. 1t was too small. l then took
her to an eight-room house. This
faced the east.
Mocquito Knocked Deal.
"She preferred north, south or west
I showed her north front house.
She didn't like the shape of the porch
railing, or the northeast gable. She
also disapproved of the color of the
house which she declared should be
green. took her to a green house,
but the bath tub was on the wrong
side of the bath room. I then showed
her ten-room house that seemer to
suit, except that the heater was where
1t ought not to be, and the closets had
three shelves instead of two. She had
about decided that the place might do
in spite of these defects, and my hopes
of realizing a fine, fat commission
were bounding deliriously, when she
discovered mosquito on the ceiling
and at once decided that the place
must be full of malaria. She rushed
from the house like one from the