The daily morning journal and courier., 1907-11-14
AN AVERAGE MANS
 MECHANICAL MUSIC
Struggles and Conquests With an Efficient Piano
 Player.
RESULTING ADVENTURES
The Player Stays, But Several Other Things Have
 Gone.

Gone.
 l fear l am what might be called an average man. I have the average number of arms and legs. have two eyes, and vote the Republican ticket l also have the average mans 10 fin gers, which are all thumbs. This has an immediate bearing up on the sub- ject in hand because it is what led me to the purchase of a mechanical play CT for my new piano. like music, but am defrauded by nature from ever making any of my own by hand. Thought I, we shall execute a flank movement on Nature; we shall exc cute music; these thumbs of mine shal not stand between me and Aida "Lohengrin, the profundity of Beethoven, the romance of Schu- mann and the swish of Victor Her bert's soubrettes, I shall work my feet, press button or two and at will will be Caruso, Flames and the pl- quant Fritzi. It will be such pleasure to sit down for few minutes in the evening, when there is nothing else to do, and sooth work-tattered nerves with quiet tune.
 So I bought the piano and I bought the player With it there came some two dozen rolls of perforated paper and a catalogue containing the names and number of 10000 more such rolls They came on Saturday afternoon, and I reached home early, to watch the man set them together. I was surprised at my interest in the simple operation. I was surprised at my eagerness to try a tune on the jigger, when the man had left and I could unabashed, lose my soul on a flight through the heavens of sound.
 There was the Yorspiel to 'Lohen- grin" I would begin on that; some thing quiet, calling for no especial virtuosity in the pumping of the feet and the pressing of two or three but tons on the digger. Wagner in his tomb probably had an unqulet five minutes just then, but to me the re- suit was not dispeasing, I had re- tardandoed in the most passionate moments; I had shot through the ten der parts with flippant velocity; but the real notes that Wagner wrote, and not those that my thumbs were once wont, to blunder upon, had rolled out upon the air. It was intoxicating. I should improve of course with prac- tice; I should be master of my re- tardandoes yet. But already I had made music!
 The one drawback to the perform ance came from my dog. He ar ranged himself neatly by my side as seated myself--he is winsome ani- nal is Tower, and sees me through anything that I undertake. He seemed especially keen on this new and mysterious operation about to be performed. He smelled the digger over thoroughly and then waited pa tiently for developments. He gave q Islght start at the first note. saw spread over his face a look of sur prise, of dismay largely mingled with Inquiry. This then resolved itself into a settled melancholy. He pointed his nose at the ceiling, forthwit!l, and accompanied me faithfully through out the composition to the bitter end
 His obllgato would sound more melting mysterious and haunting, l thought if delivered from the region of the kitchen; and I accordingly sta- toned him there. There was another roll that it would be nice to try before saunterlng forth on my regular Satur- day walk. That was little trihe by Chaminade, that got away from me before I could crowd into It some of the expression that occurred to me al- ways just a moment after the particu- | lar phrase that I wished to color "color" I believe Is the correct term had skipped away and into the receiv- ing roller from which no note returns. That piece had really to be, replayed before I could leave it. I replayed 1t twice, just to please myself that l could throw into the thing really some little passion. Me, an honest Repub- Ilican I was discovering in myself Isomewhat of the artist! l was intoxi-
 eated, overjoyed I played that Chaminade tune over yet again.
 On replacing 1t among the other
 rolls, noticed by its side a piece by
 Nevin--it would be nice to try my Inew found soul on that The tune seemd to me lovely and furthermore
 was astonished at this new self of
 mine. I was proud of 1t; I wished to test it, to explore it's reaches. Among the rolls l had selected was one bear ling the Wagner Magic Fire music. Off,
 ten had I heard boarding school chill Idren toss of that thing, and wished that Divine Providence had gifted me l-perfectly reliable mortal that am I-with something of that mystic, un-
 attainable dexterity. I put in thai Magic Fire thing, and there 1t rolled iout-a Title stif1y, perhaps but with
 all the notees in it, every one of them
 and had them all under my control
 had made them!
 Well, the announcement Of dinner I cannnH Ian nVnf