The Washington times., 1907-09-25

Lunchless. breathless, and hopeless,
Mr.. and Mrs. Algernon Newlywed ap-
preached the ninth real estate Office
visited since S a. m. In almost similar
frame OF mind. Master Newiywed, eight
months old. squirmed restlessly be-
tween the two, as the douIs parents
worked IN relays IN transporting their
precious charge.
eve win try one more agency, dear"
said Mrs. Newlywed. between gasPs,
"and II we don't set a mouse or a
fat 20 suit we will simply 20 live with
mother"
Mr. NewIywed muttered a silent
prayer.
we notice you have a fat for rent
n the Dovecote apartments. purred
Mrs. Newlywed as the grim-visased
rent clerk approached the desk
Yes. We have" he replied suavely.
An excellent bargain, four rooms and
a bath at $3.50"
oh" exclaimed Mr.. ard Mrs. Newly
wed in delighted chorus.
..But" continued the real estate man,
there are certain conditions TO De com
piled with in renting II. is nat your
bahy?'' he asked bluntly, pointing IN
tremendously 10 the NeWly "ed on
i..It certainly is" replied Mrs. Newly
wed icily I'VE would hardly be lug
cling a baby about unless II were our
oE NTas lis1i9 NeVlvwed echoed these senti-
rrents bv sputtering directly underneath
the bachelor nose OF the r E. man;
causing thzt dignitary TO remark
Object to Children
OF am very sorry madam. but we
cannot rent fats in the Dovecote TO
married couples with children. The
other tenants have most decided objec-
tions and then again there is always
the danger Of young brats defacing the
yysus ana furniture. 1 would be very
glad to accommodate you Otherwise
assure you"
Mr.. Newlvwed's ave feet eight" i'm
mediatelv stretched 10 at least six
feet II would have you understand
sir. that our little one Is no brat Eur
thermore, he has never in his whole
NE created any disturbance unless sick
and has lust as much sense about ne
care OF furniture as you nave anu
yes. and wouldn't stay in your
old fiat. IL YOU gave US the rent, IN
terDosed Mrs. NewlyWed, notify. come
on AIgernon. let's get our Precious out
OF this vile place
Master Newlywed protests
But as the attempt was made 10 re-
move Master Newlywed from his place
Of vantage upon the counter, a wall
went ND that raised the price of every
fat on the list at least 10 per cent. Inc
offce bow yelled in delight. the stenog-
rainier ciegIed behind her notebook, and
tho "r > man smiled a knowing, sick
last desperate grab at an ink well that
had aroused his fancy and was naulea
screa nningly through the door
same old story" said the bachelor
agent. EVERY day young couple stroils
in with the only perfect edition OF
vorngster since Adam was papa, be
comes insulted because they cannot get
a fat m some 'no-child- no-dog' apart
ment and fiounee out just as the kid
begins to yell because he cannot own
the Office
of tht. Hero of our story to tear up sew
| sra1 +,-znsfer books exhibited by the cal
conductor en- route Mr. and Mrs New
1,-u,,d ana their charge reached nome
/ without becoming involved in further
complications.
"Not One Decent Place"
"I,ovey." aueried Mrs. Newlywed. a.
/ she dopped YEARLY upon the door
stoop. do you realize that we have ex
! amined eleven flats and cottages and in
terviewed nine real estate men today
without as much as finding one decent
suitable placer
And to think that four Of then
should have objected to our little dari
ing. 1t makes my blood boil" said Mr.
/ Newlywed. hotly.
Never mind; who cares?" explaine'
| Mrs Newlywed I'VE can't eSpec
| people with just ordinary, common
babies to appreciate our treasure. Ca
| we. little toOtsie wooster turning &
that celebrity. who wa vainly endeav
| orlng TO extract watch from pater'
| pocket.
Get the babys diary, iovey," said MI
NeTlyUed, suddenly, and let's snte