davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11

yes; | believe that is so. He was
dear old gentleman; and he liked me
because / thought his jokes adorable.
My father and he had known each
other. But there was-no expectation
no wish to profit by his friendship.
My name in his will is great embar-
rassment, source of real annoyance.
The newspapers printed dreadful pic
lures of me in connection with the
will. say to you, quite frankly, that l
wouldn't accept a cent of Mr.. Glen
arms money if it were offered me;
and that is why,"-and her smile was
flash of spring,-"I want you to obey
| the terms of the will and earn your
! fortune"
She closed the fan sharply and
lifted her eyes to mine.
But there isn't any fortune; it's
all myth, joke"
"Mr. Pickering doesn't seem to
think so. He had every reason for be
lieving that Mr.. Glenarm was a very
rich man"
But assuming that there's money
buried there by the lake like pirates
treasure, it isn't Pickering's If he finds
it. There are laws to protect even the
dead from robbery" concluded holly
''How difficult you are! Suppose
you should fall from boat, or be sho
-accidentally-then I might have t.
take the fortune after all; and Mr.
Pickering might think of an easier way
IF oaftip IL than NV
Stealing it! Yes; know what yol
mean; but you wouldn't"
Half-past IL struck on the stairwa.
and / started to my feet.
"You wouldn't" repeated.
81 might, you know"
Il must go,-but not with that, no
with any hint of that,-please!"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
AT THE DENTISTS.

do you give gas here?" asked a
wild-looking man who rushed into a
dentists.
I'VE do" replied the dentist.
Does it put fellow to sleep?"
1T does
Sound asleep, so you can't wake
him up?'
Yes"
you could break his jaw or black
his eye and he wouldn't feel it?"
He would know nothing about ii"
How long does he Sleep"
The physical insensibility pro-
duced by inhaling the gas lasts min
ute, or probably little less"
Il expect that's long enough. Got
1t all ready for fellow to take?"
Yes. Take a seat in this chair
and show me your TOOTH"
Tooth nothing!" said the excited
caller, beginning rapidly to remove
his coat and vest Il want you to pull
a porous plaster off my back"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11

"If you let him defeat you, IL you
fail to spend your year there, we'll
overlook this one lapse" she looked
w, steadily In the eyes, wholly guilt
le~s of coquetry but infinitely kind
then"
She paused, opened the fan, held ii
up to the light and studied the golden
butterflies.
Yes"
"Then--let me see-oh, shall never
chase another rabbit as long as live!
Now go--quickly--qui
"But you haven't told me when and
where it was we met the first time
Pleased"
She laughed but urged me away
with her eyes.
II shan't do it! 1t isn't proper for
me to remember, if your memory Is
so poor. wonder how it would seem
for us to meet just once-and be in
troduced! Good night You really
came You are a gentleman of your
word, Squire Glenarm!"
She gave me the tips of her fingers
without looking at me.
A servant came in hurriedly.
Miss Devereux, Mr.. and Mrs. Tay
lor and Mr.. Pickering are in the draw
| ing-room."
Eyes; very well; l will come al
once"
Then to me:
"They must not see you-there, that
way." and she stood in the door, fac
ing me, her hands lightly touching the
frame as though to secure my way.
/ turned for a last look and saw heI
waiting-her eyes bent gravely upon
me, her arms still half-raised, barring
the door; then she turned swiftly
away and passed through the hall.
Outside l found my hat and coat
and wakened my sleeping driver. He
drove like mad into the city, and
swung myself upon the north-bound
train just as it was drawing out of the
station.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
judicial Flattery.

"On what ground, sir" sternly
asked the judge, do you seek to
evade your duty as citizen?"
'On the ground, your honor" re-
spon1ed the man who had been sum-
moned as juror, that | am IS
years old and no longer legally liable
to jury service"
you don't look it by 20 years, sir"
said the judge, but your excuse is
sufficient, and, OF course. | shall
not"
"Still. your honor" interrupted the
other, 'inasmuch as your honof puts
it before me in the light of my duty
as citizen, am willing to waive my
claim to exemption and will serve
with pleasure" Chicago Tribune.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
LIFE INSURANCE A SACRED
TRUST.
Responsibilities of Officers and ri.
rectors.

Evidently President Kingsley of the
New York Life Insurance company
has learned the great lesson of the
zines with respect to the responsible
ity and duty of directors of corpora
lions. Speaking to the new board Of
trustees, on the occasion of his elec-
ton to the presidency, he emphasized
the fact that life insurance is more
than a private business, that life in.
surance trustees are public servants,
charged at. once with the obligations
of public service and with the respon-
sibilities that attach to going bust
ness which at the same time must be
administered as trust"
He also realizes that similar respon-
sibilities rest upon the officers of the
company. Il understand" he says,
your anxiety in selecting the men
who are day by day to carry this bur-
den for you, who are to discharge this
trust in your behalf, who are to adj
minister for the benefit of the people
involved the multitudinous and exact
ing details to which it is impossible
for you to give personal attention. My
long connection with the New York
Life-covering nearly twenty years
my service in about every branch of
the company's working organization,
gives me, as | believe, profound APP
probation, not merely of the heavy
burden you have placed on my Shout
ders, but of the standards of efficiency,
the standards of faith, the standards
of integrity, which must be main
tanned at all times by the man who
serves you and the policyholders in
this high Office"
Best of all, perhaps, he feels that
words are cheap, and that the public
will be satisfied with nothing short of
performance. "My thanks, therefore"
he continues, "for an honor which out
ranks any distinction within the reach
of my ambition, cannot be expressed
in words; they must be read out Of
the record l make day by day."
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11

4 y Nikgl w. 2
lE,y aiK9y MEYAAD u
- !| |||'; ,z&IIy<14EzN[vHUH7S
~-+1ss2 &s tsA-Ss Br/lNmwAIMm50Y
-
NZhW5W
Al5Ep2r MzHzXG4E1gT IlzA4lENzaZXh

day, but, say, with the first bluebirds.
| believe they are the harbingers up
there"
Her very ease was a balm to my
spirits; she was now veritable daugh-
ter of repose. One arm in its long,
white sheath lay quiet in her lap; her
right hand held the golden butterflies
against the soft curve of her cheek. A
collar of pearls clasped her throat and
accented the clear girlish outlines of
her profile. | felt the appeal of her
youth and purity. 1t was like cry in
my heart, and the dreary house by the
lake, and Pickering and the weeks
within the stone walls of my prison
were as though they had never been.
1.-The friends who know me best
never expect me to promise to be apy-
where at given time. / can't tell ;
perhaps / shall follow the bluebirds to
Indiana; but why should /, when I
can't play being Olivia any more?"
"Why not? You have seen how dull
| am and that note of apology you
wrote from the school really fooled
me- But / have seen the real Olivia
now. l don't want you to go too far
not where I can't follow-and this
flight | shall hardly dare repeat"
Her lips closed-like a rose that had
gone back to be bud again-and she
pondered a moment, slowly freeing
and imprisoning the golden butterflies.
You have risked a fortune, Mr..
Glenarm, very, very foolishly,-if you
are found here. Why, Olivia must
have recognized you! She had seen
you often across the wall"
"But | don't care-Im not staying
at that rum up there for money. My
grandfather meant more to me than
that"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
THE BEST HE COULD GET.
Amateur Gardener Could Not Under.
stand Why Seeds Did Not Sprout.

The woes of the amateur gardener
are very amusing to others, but de-
cidedly real to the man who has
spoiled suit of clothes, blistered his
hands and lost his temper in his eff
forts to make things grow
A young man, recently married,
early in the spring secured a sub
urban place, mainly with the idea of
fresh, homegrown vegetables Every
evening he would hurry through his
supper and rush out to his garden,
where he displayed more energy than
skill. But, alas! When many little
green things began to break the
ground in his neighbors' gardens, his
own remained as bare as the Sahara
ut certainly has got me beat" he
confided to friend at his Office one
day. Il can't understand why not a
blessed thing has come up. l planted
peas and corn and tomatoes"
Perhaps the seed were reflective"
the friend suggested.
II hardly think it was that" the
gardener replied, ''for / got the very
best-paid Is cents can for them"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
LonqfeIIow indicated.

The man with the bills was making
his eleventh call upon the portrait
painter.
You'll have to come again." said
the latter, with sadly humorous
smile. you know the poet says Art
is long"
Eyes, sir" responded the bill col
lector, in high keyed voice; "and
he says also that time is fleetingn
All the time I've got to spare to you,
sir, has fleeted. Now you dig up, or
the next time | come I'll bring an at
tachment writ"
Thereupon Art, though really short.
dug up.-Chicago Tribune.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11

ment that the window l had left oper
as l scrambled out the night before
was closed. | dropped my bag and
crept to the front door, thinking that
if Bates had discovered my absence il
was useless to attempt any further
deception. | was amazed to find the
great doors of the main entrance flung
wide, and in real alarm | ran through
the hall and back to the library.
The nearest door stood open, and, as
I peered in, a curious scene disclosed
itself A few of the large cathedral
candles still burned brightly in severa.
places, their flames rising strangely in
the gray morning light. Books had
been taken from the shelves and scat
tered everywhere, and sharp nipple
ments had cut ugly gashes in the
shelving. The drawers containing
sketches and photographs had beer
pulled out and their contents thrown
about and trampled under foot.
The house was as silent as tomb
but as l stood on the threshold tryins
to realize what had happened, some
thing stirred by the fireplace and
crept forward, listening, until stood
by the long table beneath the grea
chandelier. Again heard a sound al
of some animal walking and stretch
ing, followed by moan that undoubt
eddy was human. Then the hands of ;
man clutched the farther edge of tn,
table, and slowly and evidently witt
infinite difficulty figure rose and tn
dark face of Bates, with eyes blurre,
and staring strangely. confronted me
He drew his body to it's height an,
leaned heavily upon the table.
snatched a candle and bent towar
him to make sure my eyes were no
tricking me.
CTO BE CONTINUED
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
The Guile of the Greeks.

At first the more thoughtful ones
regarded the gift suspiciously. Then,
taking further thought, they said, one
to the other:
saw, what's the diff? It's only a
near-art horse, anyhow. Now, if 1t
was one of those chug-chug wagons
coming in here to break the speed linn
it laws we wouldn't stand for it for
a minute"
Thus it was, the victim of oyer-con-
fidence, that Troy fell.-Puck.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11

According to DR.. Robert Hutchin-
son, of London, if at any time meat
Is not available, bread, sugar and eggs
will make "a very respectable sup
port for the body" Sugar 10 an s0-
ceedingly valuable article OF food az
Z source of energy, the unfortunate
thing about it being that it contains
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
Flow of Artesian Well,

To calculate the rate of flow Of an
artesian well simple plan is to lower
bottle of aniline fluid to a depth of
say 500 feet and then electrically ex.
plode cap to burst the bottle. The
time required for the fluid to appear
at the surface gives an accurate gauge
as to the velocity of flow. 1t is claimed
that this method gives results as &C.
curate as a weir. The diameter OF
the pipe being known, the rate of flow
readily follows.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
Next in Line.

Clancy with paper)-Glory be!
wondher iv miracles'll liver cease?
They've wirelessed tn air, weighed tn
sowl an now, bedad, they've photy.
graphed tn breath! l wonder what
they'll do mkt?
Connolly-Faith, it amt too much
to predict that in a month er so they'll
be radin tn unwritten law!--Puck.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
Sure Winner,

What is the plot in your new
drama?"
1T has none"
But how can it succeed?"
flush. New idea We're going to
let the audience guess on the plot at
So cents throw. They can't win.
Can you beat it?"-Milwaukee Sen.
unel
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
How He Caught Them.

Archbishop Whateley had a true
sense of grammer, says an old English,
man who remembers him, and delight,
ed to spring catch questions. One
was:
What is the vocative of cat?"
Generally the assured answer was,
"Oh, cat!"
The archbishop would smile then
and say, mo. Puss, puss! "-Youth S
Companion.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
Grand Larceny AGAIN,

Eva-And you confess that you
kissed Ethel?
Jack-Most assuredly.
Eva-But when / asked you IL you
had ever kissed another girl didn't
you say mo, honestly"
Jack-Of course / did. You see !
always kiss them dishonesty. 1t Is
no harm to steal kiss, you know
Chicago Daily News.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
Careful Public Guardian.

One of the pillars of the city ordi-
nances is traffic policeman stationed
at Fourth avenue and Twenty-third
street. He loses no opportunity OF
making war on persons who drop
banana peels in the street. He
pounces upon an offender and orders
him to pick up the slippery menace
to life and limb and to carry it to .
receptacle for waste on the sidewalks
New York Herald.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
Each After His Kind.

Greenroome--I've played to full
houses, every night for week, and
never got hand.
Greencloth--And I've played hands,
every night for week, and never got
a full house.-Puck.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
No Novice.

why" asked her mother, "do you
Hink Mr.. Sniggsley has had expert
ence in lovemaking?"
Il noticed that he took pains when
ever he tried to kiss me to arrange
it so that we could not be seen by any
one who might be peeping through
the keyhole. Chicago Record-Her-
aid
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
Plan Bio Hunt for Fossils.

New Haven, Conn.-Prof. Schuchert,
head of the Peabody museum at Yale,
with two assistants, will begin an ex-
tensive geological expedition July :.
The party will investigate the coast
formation and the mari beds of New
Jersey, the valley above Harper's
Ferry, w. Va, the Appalachian range
Whereabouts, the fossils Of western
Tennessee, and the Arbuckle noun
tains of Oklahoma.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
"soap Bubble Hanging from a Reed"

Our life is but soap bubble hang
ing from reed; it is formed, expands
to its full size, clothes itself with the
escapes at moments from the law Of
gravitation; but soon the black speck
appears in it and the globe of emerald
and gold vanishes into space, leaving
behind it nothing but simple drop
of turbid water. All the poets have
made this comparison, it is so strik-
ing and so true. To appear, to shine,
to disappear; to be born, to suffer and
to die; is it not the whole sum Of
life, for a butterfly, for nation, for a
star Henry Frederic Amiel.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
SUBSTITUTES FOR MEATS
CTo BE CONTINUED

no heterogeneous matter. Bread, how
ever, does contain some, hence it bal
ances up well when combined will
sugar. In times of scarcity - food
bread and molasses is not half baC
diet-at least, it can be relied on IL
keep the body up to fair state o
efficiency.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
Revenge.

First Small Boy-I'm goin' ter git
square wild pa fer lickin' me ter-day.
Second Small Boy-How yer goin
ter?
First Small Boy-When de circus
comes along I'm goin' ter say l don't
care ter go.-Judge.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11

She-I do so admire those officers.
He--How strange! / don't-haw-
and can't understand-er-what there
is-haw-to admire about them
They're just-er-men dressed up
Scraps.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
An Observation.

The man who has the softest snap
OTIS saying nothing rash)
Is he who's almost always sure
To have the most hard cash.
Judge.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
SAVING His Life.

The Man In-Hey! I'm drowning.
Jump in and pull me out!
The Man on the Pier-I can't swim.
The Man In-Well, jump in and let
me stand on you, you blithering idiot
-Harper's Weekly.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
The Sad Side.

'Tis far more blessed, so they say,
To give than to receive.
IT'S likewise more expensive.
I've reason to believe.
Judge.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
Now Stop!

What cut-up he is, isn't he?"
"In what way?"
"He works in butcher shop. Mil.
waukee Sentinel,
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
CHAPTER XVIII.

| Meet an Old Friend.
When l reached Glenarm House the
next morning | found to my astonish.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
Might Drop Dead.

Oh, If could only find
In my last summers vest
A musty old two-dollar bill
Well, you can guess the rest.
Chicago Daily News.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11

Handsome Pete-Say, Teddy, dis
nickel you just give me is lead
Philanthropic Miss-Why, is it pos
sible! Well, never mind, my poor
man, you may keep it as a reward for
your unusual honesty.-Chicago News.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
Philosophical Tin

'''''0S0P'''Ne'' y 'P'
With bow and cheerful smile
The juggler of cups and plates
Thus spake as he pocketed his fee:
''All things come to him who waits"
Chicago Daily News.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11

Mistress-How is 1t I never hear
any talk in the kitchen, Jane, when
your young man visits you?
Jane-Oh, ma'am, he's that modest
that he does nothing but eat when he
calls on me.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11
EA a NS|k <N11nzG
GElJ[1[1[a[5[D> Sr10[L[5O
Her Choice.

Her Choice.
Said he: DO you like short men best
Prefer the bold or shy menu"
She dropped her eyes and softly said:
I'm sure / favor Hymen."
Judge.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-07-11

1t doesn't take long for coming
man to get into the has-been class.
The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1907-05-11
) The Evil
! That Men Do


justified in abandoning his sxteen-ea
long rectorsp Rosy Long Island because the church about
of her mother according the plans CT architect about whom moth
ing but the nauous The task has always been diff
is which the subsequent generations always have to eadu
they preserve much that is CT genuine value the world
Stanford White whom Mrs Clarence H. Macay chose for the
architect OF this memorial church, was without question one OF the
leading architects of his time of the architects America has
produced her short of producing architects He has his
credit whatever other things are to his dcredt such buildings as
Trinity church Boston, Madison Square Presbyterian church. White
law Reds Fifth residence buildings for the universities of
Virginia and New York city and the Washington arch.
In the realm of architectural beauty he had few vahere
in the older communities where of architectural proportion
easily Now the question certainly would America
be justified tearing down these buildings, distinguished her
few in architecture and especially distinguished the
que
ton answered in the affirmative justified
refusing inhabit of God which, his regard built
after designs made by the devil In can be conpreened that no man
would comfortably house of God dedicate high
pose when that house built according the imagination of
White although the Rev Dr. Parkhurs deliberately praised the
architect dedcatng the Madison Square tragedy
of last June Many would feel entering
just they who have remembering minds feel curious when
entering Madison Square Presbyterian church Trinity church
And yet the St Paul Dispatch discussing this theme says
IF the world had justified such remnbranc pudiceS
these long array of buildings, paintings poems would be
that world and much beauty therefore, truth company
David aurng figure, when remembers many things
did things net only dpeasng generation but
spare Mona Lisa and we stand with
awe before its eternal the Louvre But what of painter
who held the brush? Must permit Anthony slash
canvas? Benvenuto Ceni quite evil his generation
he through the mist OF half dozen yet
OF the goldsmith would be cruder more primitive not for the
divine perfection of Benvenuos Workmanship Shelley deserted his
wife with bruay which would be visited Shelley
citizen OF Rosyn l. or CT Minnesota But longer
read the "Cenc The because Wilde broke all
funds go uheard? Even William Shakespeare stole
crimes have thought against supreme genius And
"" VIII all rush to hear Caruso the artist Notwithstanding
ndsPutable truths concerning the
SymPathizng as we must with the Rev Mr.. Peck
declare also that should have him judge upon
that beauty which is truth for the sake lived as eagerly
as for the sake of that truth which is beauty.