davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21
PRESS POINTS

Louisville Herald: A Massachusetts farmer has invented an automobile that ehurns milk. 'Tis just little whey 1t has.
 Austin Statesman How can MT. Caleb Powers ever hope to be acquitted, when he continues to threaten to run for Con gress after he gets out of jail?
 Knoxville Journal and Tribune: Press dispatches announce that the municipal treasury of Atlantic City Is loaded with money. Of course it is, at this stage of the tourist season
 Washington Herald: A Seattle firm has just turned out the largest and the stout est vehicle ever manufactured in this country. Doubtless It is intended for Sec retary Taft's band wagon.
 Houston Post: So long as soul-kisses are quoted on the market at $500 per, the average Texan will be satisfied with the old-fashioned red-lip smacks to be had in the honeysuclSle arbor at twilight
 New Orleans Times Democrat: A num- Der of dark horses are being groomed for the democratis presidential nomina- tion in various sections of the country, but from present indications none of them ie likely to go to the post as 8 ''hot favorite"
 Shreveport Times: Orator Watterson maintains that the greatest fault with I phariseeism." Why that complaint Is as old as the hills and as common as sin, and yet it would be hard to find a man who candidy believes that he is guilty of either.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21
THE NEVERMOR E.

By Dante Gabriel Rossetti Look in my face; my name Is Might
 have-been; am also called No-more, Too-lats.
 Farewell; Unto thine ear I hold the dead-s sea
 shell Cast up thy Life's foam-fettered feet
 between; Unto thine eyes the glass where that
 Is seen Which had Life's form and Loves,
 but by my spell Is now a shaken shadow intolerable, Of ultimate things unuttered the frail
 screen. Mark me. how still I ann But should
 there dart One moment through my soul the soft
 surprise Of that winged Peace which lulls the
 breath of signs Then shalt thou see me smile, and turn
 apart Thy visage to mine ambush at thy
 heart Sleepless with cold commemorative
 aYaa-
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

A CnlcagO woman ndS Droken the rec ord by winning s52, ,7OO alimony. Now for discussion. pro and con. Does Matri- mony Pay?"
 PEOPLE. It takes funny people to make up 8
 world,
 The good and the bad and the fool
 ish, The people who pose for the sake of
 applause,
 The meek and the mild and the
 mulish. There's the fellow who lives on the
 best in the land, Yet nobody knows when he labors The chap who's deluded by fanciful
 schemes
 And makes life a bore to his neigh
 bors There's the man who is bound to keep
 always in view, His own horn consistently footing, And there stands another who thinks
 that the world
 Was put here expressly for footing. The thoughtful assemble and speak of The giddy raise Ned with their
 playing The wicked go frolicking along with a
 laugh. While the sober and pious are pray
 ing. Variety, you know, Is the spice of this
 life,
 There are all kinds of freaks In the
 tumble. The loud and rampa geous, the silent
 and soft
 ft,I ft nA So don't be discouraged whenever you
 find
 A character past your explaining. We all have a kink in our makeups, guess,
 So what is the use of complaining? Last Sunday the Columbia State had but one pert paragraph. It was the weather forecast for South Carolina The Cincinnati Enquirer became excited the other day and published head like this: A s4OOo JOB A S40O0 JOB. Awaits MT. Shipp, Private Secretary of Senator Beveridge. Professor Shaler Matthews says mar riage is too much of a picnic. Sometimes 1t reminds us of a picnic when there is i a steady downpour of rain and the lunch is lost and nobody laughs. Lexington, Ky, took off the lid and asked Bryan to make a speech. There is no change In the ice cream sit- uation This month marks the crest of the peekaboo wave. PAUL COOK.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21
Gates a Bear.

John w. Gates, our own T. C. l. Co. Gates, to whom Birmingham is deeply indebted for hls oft-repeated optimistic prognosticatlons of it's future strength and greatness, is accused by the English newspapers of forcing consols down." said a man in the lobby last night.
 These English papers say that Gates Is now ostensibly out of the market, ex- cept as a gambler on horse races, but that he is really in it as bear, and that the special objects of his attack are the Hartman lines. In England he is at tempting and somewhat succeeding in pro- noting 8 general feeling of financial ner- vousness."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21
ADRIFT WITH THE TIMES
FOOTBALL PRELUDE.

FOOTBALL PRELUDE. Ere long the football hero will Prepare to conquer in the mill Where eyes are gouged and legs are
 broke And 'tis a noble thing to choke An adversary till he dies, Else, incapacitated lies Oh, football Is a noble game. Why hold the manly sport to blame? What care you if some lives are lost? Why stop and ponder on the cost, So long a others progeny Shall battle there for victory? Stand pat and let the gore be shed! Who knows what fame a player dead May bring unto the college which First woke in him the football itch? And who shall say that those who fall Shall not adorn an honored pail? On with the work, let coaches try To teach the slogan, Win or die" Let each ambitious, raw recruit Put on bulky, padded suit And learn the game from A to z, If he would e'er immortal be!
 A KISS. kiss by any other name would make the same noise.
 GOING UP. Weeks is a rising man." What is his business?" He's an aeronaut."
 HIS LIFTING VERSE. "Scriblets Is making a name in the world"
 What makes you thing so?" He has verse in dozen magazines every month"
 You don't tell me?'
 "Yes, he writes advertising rhymes for breakfast food" The former Emperor of Korea is cer- talnly up against it, but whatever else happens, he won't have to work. A good way to attract attention nowa- days is to make a noise like a million dollars.
 A prohibitlonist has compiled a list of the dry spots in Indiana. Rileys swim min hole" is one.
 MADE HIM GREAT. Said Rameses II, a monarch wise, Whose fame is not a mystery, Way back In the dawn of history, "I think 1t will pay me to advertise"
 UNPARLIAMENTAR "The gentleman from Bunk county!" said the speaker, stiffly.
 Hold on, Mir Speaker" cried mem Der of the opposition. 'I object! Bunk county has never yet produced gentle man."
 IN THE RANKS. A shortage of chorus girls, press agents
 say,
 Is what we'll again have to face, But we can not, in sooth, tell how short
 each one Is.
 Until she has taken her place.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21
REFLECTION OF A BACHELOR.
rom he New York Press,

From he New York Press.
 Either girl is heartbroken because she can't marry man or because she does.
 A man would just as lief be honest as not If it were possible to make any money that way
 A woman never feels n.ireiy respect able unless something she wears is done in hand-stitching. f.
 An alarm clock is a useful thing to make you wish in the morning you had mt set II to so off so early.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

There is no music in Satan's realm,' says a minister. A preacher said some time ago that hell was full of peelzaboos. If this sort of thing keeps up hell will be considered an attractive place.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

George Bernard Shaw has had a narrow escape from drowning. Too bad" remarks the Boston Herald. without letting anyone know whether the phrase, "Too bad" expresses sym pathy or regret.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

The curb brokers fill and obstruct Broad street in New York in the busiest hours of the day, and they re- fuse to yield ground they won by GUS tom.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

A political boss Is called in Massa- chusetts superman. But 1t was fondly thought the species had be- come extinct.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

The republican keynotes from the mouths of Roosevelt and Taft have opened the presidential campaign in great style.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

Governor Hughes is working the country fairs. His lightning rod must be in receptive mood.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

Great Britian Is preparing to build a 30,000-ton battleship which would make any existing battleship look like thirty cents.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

The Hague propositions do not promise to unduly increase the plow- share and pruning hook industry.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

Another feather has been placed in the cap of the Monte Carlo by per sons who say that it Is the plague spot" of Europe.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

Postmaster Morgan has been hand ling the mails over thirty years, and some college should make him a doc tor of letters.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

There is an impression that Attor- ney General Bonaparte threatens as we'll as talks too much.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

Russia is said to be a country of bad language. It Is hard to see how anybody could live there without be- ing tempted to swear.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

A Pittsburg messenger boys strike was ended by giving them something to eat Arbitration through the stom- ach Is not a bad plan
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

Hartman and Uncle Sam are candi- dates for controller of the railroads, and it is difficult to say which will get there first.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

The house of lords is not to be mended or ended right away.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

While the garment workers union is large, a garment wearers' union would be much larger
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

J. P. Morgan smokes cigars nine inches long and he Is also credited with having a long head.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

MT. Roosevelt was escorted to Cape Cod by torpedo boats. He is a great believer in sensational ceremony.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

Secretary Taft is about to girdle the earth. He does it as last prep eration for the 1908 circus.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

The end of the telegraph strike is what the suffering and innocent pub lis desires.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

Tammany has adorned it's building with an $S7OoO mortgage. It does not possess the power of assessment 1t once did.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

Andrew Carnegie's benevolence be- gins to turn from libraries to hospi- tals. He is becoming useful in his old age.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

The Koreans should cheer up. They have been presented with a library by a Kentucky man.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

The automobile would be all right If 1t would tone down its honk.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

Bubonic plague is more dreaded in San Francisco than moral leprosy of the Schmitz sort.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

The Teddy bears did not make last weeks panics, although they may have protlted by 1t.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

The dog days will soon be ended even if the dogs are still numerous.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

Old Orchard will be New Orchard when it is rebuilt.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

Crop prospects, are daily improving.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

The former Emperor of Korea is cer- talnly up against it, but whatever else happens, he won't have to work.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

"Scriblets Is making a name in the world"
 What makes you thing so?"
 He has verse in a dozen magazines every month."
 You don't tell me?"
 "Yes, he writes advertising rhymes for a breakfast food"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

A good way to attract attention. nowa- days is to make a noise like a million dollars.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

the dry spots in Indiana. Riley's swim min hole" is one.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

A Chicago woman has broken the rec ord by winning s52,7OO alimony. Now for a discussion. pro and con- Does Matri- mony Pay?"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

MADE HIM GREAT. Said Rameses II, a monarch wise, Whose fame is not a mystery, Way back In the dawn of history, "I think 1t will pay me to advertise
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

UNPARLIAMENTAR "The gentleman from Bunk county" said the speaker, stiffly. Hold on, Mir Speaker" cried mem Der of the opposition. 'I object! Bunk county has never yet produced gentle man."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

Louisville Herald; Massachusetts farmer has invented an automobile that ehurns milk. Iris just a little whey 1t has
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21
A KISS

A kiss by any other name would make the same noise.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

GOING UP. Weeks is a rising man." What is his business?" Hes an aeronaut."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

Entered at the Birmingham, Ala, postofice as second-ciass matter under act of Congress March 3. 1879.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

IN THE RANKS. A shortage of chorus girls, press agents say, Is what we'll again have to face, But we can not, in sooth, tell how short each one Is, Until she has taken her place.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

Austin Statesman How can Mir Caleb Powers ever hope to be acquitted, when he continues to threaten to run for Con gress after he gets out of jail?
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

Washington Bureau AgeHerald. 142i c street N. W.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-08-21

An eye, like Mars, to threaten and command, Hamlet.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1907-11-23

How have the Hypothetical scien.
fists and the opponents Of unbelief
benefited themselves or humanity at
large by sowing the seeds of doubt
broadcast In the world? The real SCI
entists do not fall in this category. for
they are believers In the real sense OF
the word; they know too much. they
have seen too many mysterious mani
festations of the Divine creative pow
er. Now, those who have disposed OF
the Bible and all evidences of tnspira-
ton, have written great many books
and some of them have won what the
world at large lightly calls fame. Ac-
cording to the ordinary measures that
are applied In such cases. they have
been extremely successful, but real
success means the benefit OF human
fly in some form or other. II no such
benefits can be shown as the result OF
their labors. their success Is not equal
to that achieved by the direst poverty
and the deepest ignorance. = Joel
Chandler, in Uncle Remus' Magazine.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1907-11-23
ALL THINGS in PROPORTION.
lnvaIid's Meal Evidently Had Not In.
creased Good Humor.

For many weeks the irritable mer-
chant had been riveted to his bed by
typhoid fever. Now he was conva-
lescing. He clamored for something
to eat. declaring that he was stary-
ing.
Tomorrow you may have some
thing to eat" promised the doctor.
The merchant realized that there
would be restraint to his appetite.
yet he saw, in vision, modest, steam
ing meal placed at his bedside.
Here is your dinner" said the
nurse next day, az she gave the glow
ering patient spoonful of tapioca
pudding. land the doctor emphasizes
that everything else you do must be
in the same proportion"
Two hours later the nurse heard a
frantic call from the bed chamber.
Nurse" breathed the man heapily,
Il want to do some reading, bring me
postage stamp"
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1907-11-23
"The Confederate Colonel

No class Of men In the world have
better manners than the southern. gen.
tleman. The type of this class is a
dignified man, who insists upon being
treated with respect, but who always
comedies to others that which he de-
mands from them. He is deferential
In his manner and assumes that the
customs and views OF others are en-
titled to respect. In intercourse with
q Spaniard the typical Confederate
colonel would never by word or ges-
ture intimate that he considered him.
self in any respect the superior of the
gentleman with whom he might be
talking or that his business methods
were more modern. In other words.
the southern colonel has charming
manners, and what was written by
Native Of New England" was to say
in effect that good manners are bust.
ness assets worth using.-Baltimore
Sun.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1907-11-23
Copy Of Rare Bible.

In Wolfenbuttel, Hesse, Germany.
Is an old bible which is greatly treas
ured. In that passage in Gene
sis where God told Eve that
Adam shall be her master and shall
rule over her. the German translation
Is "Und er soil diem herr sein." Herr,
which means master. does not occur
In this bible. but instead there an
pears the word "narr," which means
fool. The error was caused by a quar-.
rel between the printer and. his wife
In the year 1880. The wife was venge-
ful and In the silent watches of the
night she entered the room where her
husband had been setting type and
maliciously changed herr" into
MARI" The printer was arrested at
ter the book had been printed ana
the mistake discovered; but his APP
prentice testified that he saw the wife
steal into the composing room and al
ter the word. The woman was i'm
prisoned for blasphemy and died in
prison Orders were given that all
the copies of the edition should be
destroyed. This was done, with the
exception of the one copy In the Wolf
enbuttel library.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1907-11-23
WHEN 4 .HuNcH" Hello cooo.



Kay Spence, q well-known horseman
of Mexico, Mo-, won $1,000 at the
Louisville, KY, race meeting short
time ago as the result of = 'hunch."
Mr. Spence has . large breeding
stable of runners" near Mexico. and
attends all the big racing events In
the country. Not long since he was
in Louisville and entered the betting
ring to see what odds were being Of
fered on the various entries. He
found that Joaquin was the fayorits
ut even money, and pulled his wallet
from his pocket, intending to bet on
that horse. His attention was At
tracted BY something that fell from
his wallet to the ground. and he stoop-
ed and picked It up. 1t was Chi.
nese laundry ticket. He looked at
the books" again and found that there
was an entry with q Chinese name.
Wing Ting. at ten to one. That set
tied 1t, for he considered he had re-
ceived . "hunch" that could not be
overlooked Wing Ting won handily.
Needless to say, those who backed the
favorite considered Spence the sew.
enth son Of the seventh son.-Kansas
City Star.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1907-11-23

st. Louis rejofces in the sobriquet
Of Mound City from the fact that the
original settlers found there many
elevations which 1t is supposed were
relics of that strange people who
dwelt in the Ohio and Mississippi val
leys and are known to modern times
only as the Mound Buflders.s No AIDE
Quate explanation has yet been found
Of their strange mode Of leaving
memorials Of their existence. The
limestone bluffs on which part of
st. Louis stands furnish . solid foun-
dation for the business buildings.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1907-11-23
AUTUMN HATS LARGE

mushroom hat being more prominent
than any other seen during the sum-
mer months. Every imaginable color
and shape are shown. yet all of them
on the generally round shape, over
loaded with elaborate trimmings.
Every sort of trimming and mate
rial is put to use. The only stipula-
ton made is that the hate complete
shall show a soft combination of col
ors that harmonic one with the 9TH
er, with no brilliant contrasts.
Some of the big hats measure near.
ly rs inches from side to side, and
many of them are trimmed with what
the shopkeepers called a simple
style" That simple style consists OF
one huge bird of paradise with its
long beak towards the front of the
hat and its beautiful plumage spread
ing almost over the entire crown.
These birds are perhaps the most
expensive form of trimming, owing to
their scarcity. but the shops are
showing many soft, fluffy feathers
made of marabout and cock plumes
which answer the purpose and do not
cost one-tenth as much as bird Of
paradise.
Let the home-sewer remember that
these big bell-shaped hats require
much trimming. Some of them are
very pretty with just large bow OF
ribbon on them. To make bow suf-
ficiently large for the up-to-date hat,
it. will take at least two yards Of tat
feta silk, cut on the bias in teninch
strips. II you trim the hat with rib
bon instead Of the bias silk, you
need at least six yards to make full
bow, and the ribbon should be from
eight to IL inches In width.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1907-11-23

"Stop!" shouted the man on the
country road, holding up q warning
hand. Muttering something about
rural cops, the automobiles obeyed.
Turn around and come back to
town with me-" said the stranger.
you were going at least IS miles an
hour"
You're constable, suppose" said
the automobilist, with covert sneer,
when they had reached the village.
"Me?" replied the passenger. NO.
I'm a farmer and had to come into
town when all the teams was busy.
Nice growing weather? Thanks. Good
by"
Ensuing comment is purposely omit
ted.-Philadelphia Public Ledger.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1907-11-23
HAVE CRAZE FOR FORMULA.
Smokers Follow Fashions In the Use
Of Tobacco.

MAKE me up a package of tobacco
according to the formula used by Ed
win Booth" said the man with q
southern accent. THAT is the third
man who has asked for that kind Of
tobacco today" said the dealer 1T
is strange that people from remote
parts OF the country as well az New
Workers make q fad of buying the
same brand of tobacco that Booth
smoked. And 1t isn't always the Booth
mixture that they want / have filed
away the formulas for mixing the
favorite tobacco Of many famous per-
sons. Smokers the country over have
heard of this collection of recipes and
one feature OF every mans trip to
New York is to try pipeful of some
big mans favorite tobacco. In most
cases this special mixture is 30
strong that the nerves Of the average
smoker cannot stand 1t. He has to
give up after q few pipefuls and 10
back to popular mixture. but he has
the satisfaction of having had the ex.
perience. The New York Sun.