The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-05-24
THE CAREER OF "CLARA"

I never knew a boy more heartily
dispised by other boys than Claire
We called him CLARA,
and said he was a sissy and
"girl-boy.'
He was the apple of his mothers
eye. She kept him in kits and curls
when we were smoking cigarettes,
and wouldn't let him play with
rough" boys.
He liked girls better anyway.
He never said anything stronger
than ooh, mercy" and ooh, sugar"
when we were saying "Gosh1dorn
it," He wouldn't play ball, fight,
chew tobacco or go swimming.
But he always had his lessons.
When we boys had reached the
age when we would wash our necks
of our own accord and could look
at a girl without going deaf, dumb
and blind, Clara" was wearing a
high collar and combing his glossy,
black hair in a poetic wave.
He got tall and spindling, had a
mincing walk and talked in sweet,
girlish tones. He was too pompous
for all get-out. chockful of self as
surance, and there was no snubbing
him.
He never played with us at recess
time. He hung around with the
girls,
Somehow "Clara's" affectations
and air of superiority got on my
nerves more than it should have
done. Perhaps it was because he
tagged after Angelica Bowen, whom
regarded as my girl" | was
stuck on Angelica.
Angelica was a plump, strong,
motherly sort of girl. thought [
could understand her interest in
Clara" If ever a boy needed a
really sensible omther, CLARA" was
that boy.
In due time ! went away to col
lege, acquired a smattering of law,
and came to the city to hang out
my shingle.
| correspondent with Angelica, but
from the tone of her friendly, chatty
letters | couldn't tell for the life of
me whether she cared for me or
not.
One day | met CLARA" in the
street. He was older, of course, and
rather seedy, but as pompous and
mincing as ever. | was looking
seedy, too. He said, apologetically.
he was clerking in a grocery store.
Weeks later | got my first retain
er, and, feeling flush, went to the
theater. The play was one of those
historical things, with swashbuck-
lers, sword duels and high-fown
repartee. The scenery and costum-
ing were none too elegant, and
more than half the people on the
stage were supers-lOrds. ladies,
lackeys, soldiers and so on.
And in the ballroom scene who
should come mincing and smirking
from the wings, with fine lady
on his arm, but not a word to say,
but-Claire Applebie! And in tights
that hung from his spindling legs in
folds!
I laughed till my sides ached.
Next day | wrote home about it,
say, Isn't that just like Clara to
get stage-struck?"
went to the same theater a few
weeks later, and saw CLARA again.
And, bless me, if he didn't have a
line to speak! Me lud, the car
rage waits" or something like that.
l wrote Angelica a funny letter.
in my best vein, about CLARA" as
an actor. She didn't answer it.
Then | heard from my mother that
Angelica and Applebie were en-
gagged.
I'll admit, now that it's all over,
that the news knocked me silly. |
determined to be a Woman-hater.
My revenge would come naturally.
Clara" of course, wouldn't make
good as an actor He would go back
to the grocery. He and Angelica
would live in squalid rooms.
She would grow slovenly and Stat
ternly with the care of squally
babies. She would very soon see
she had made mistake in marry