davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
Truth and
Quality

appeal to the Well-Informed in every
walk Of life and are essential to permanent
success and crcditable standing. Accor-
ingly, it is not claimed that Syrup Of Figs
and Elixir of Soma is the only remedy Of
known value, but one of many reasons
why it is the best of personal and family
laxatives is the fact that it cleanses,
swcetens and relieves the internal organs
on which it acts without any facilitating
after effects and without having to increase
the quantity from time to time
It acts pleasantly and naturally and
truly as laxative, and its component
parts are known to and approved by
physicians, as it is free from all objection
able substances. To get its beneficial
effects always purchase the genuine
manufactured by tie California Fig Syrup
Co., only, and for sale by all leading drug
gists.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
HE HAD THE QUALIFICATIONS.
No Need for Maiden to Seek Further
for Her Affinity.

Prince Dabro, the young Egyptian
who has come to America to study the
cotton industry, said in New York the
other day:
while we produce superb cotton in
Egypt, the industry is not regulated
there with such wisdom as you en-
ploy. Clever. indeed. is the conduct
of your American cotton industry-as
clever as the conduct of a young Penn
sylvania ungraduate whom l heard
about the other day.
This young man sat in a Louis
Quinze drawing-room in conversation
with a beautiful girl. The girl, look
ing pensively into the fire, said:
1.-THE man 1 marry must be both
brave and clever
"'Well,' said the young man, when
we were skating on the Wissahickon,
and came to the dangerous spot and
broke through, saved your life, didn't
I?
"She smiled at him roguishly.
"'That was brave she said, but it
was not clever, was it?'
YES" said he, it was. led you to
the dangerous spot on purpose
"She threw her arms about him,
murmuring:
"'You DEAR"
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
ECZEMA COVERED BABY.
Worst Case Doctors Ever Saw-Suf.
fered Untold Misery-Perfect
Cure by Cuticura Remedies.

my son, who is now twenty-five
years of age, when four months old
began to have eczema on his face,
spreading quite rapidly until he was
nearly covered. The eczema was some
thing terrible, and the doctors said it
was the worst case they ever saw. At
times his whole body and face were
covered. all but his feet. ! used many
kinds Of patent medicines, to no avail.
A friend teased me to try Cuticura.
At last I decided to try Cuticura when
my boy was three years and four
months old, having had eczema all that
time and suffering untold misery.
began to use all three of the Cuticura
Remedies. He was better in two
months; In six months he was well.
Mrs. r. L. Risley, Piermont. N. H..
Oct. "a, 1906"
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
curTHIs OUT.
Fine Recipe for the Quick Cure Of
Coughs and Colds.

Mix half ounce of Concentrated oil
of pine with two ounces of glycerine
and half pint of good whisky; shake
well each time and use in doses of a
teaspoonful to a tablespoonful every
four hours.
This is the formula prescribed by
the renowned throat and lung special
list who established the camp for con-
sumptives in the pine woods of Maine
and whose remarkable cures attracted
widespread attention among the med
ical fraternity He declares that it
will heal the lungs and cure any
cough that is durable and will break
up an acute cold in "a hours. The in
gradients can be secured from any
prescription druggist at small cost
and is easily mixed at home.
Be sure not to, buy the ordinary
bulk oil of pine nor patent medicine
limitations, as they will produce nau-
sea. The real Concentrated" oil of pine
is product of the laboratories of the
Globe Pharmaceutical Co., Dayton,
Ohio, and is guaranteed under the
National Pure Food and Drug act. 1t
comes put up for medicinal use in
half-ounce walls enclosed in tin screw
top cases which protect it from heat
and light.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13

MIR. EDWARD M. BURTT, s N. JEFF
4v4 ferson Ave. st. Louis, Mo-, writes:
''ltaffords me much pleasure to an
nounce that have used your medicine
at various times for several years, and
that it has given entire satisfaction. not
only in my own family, but also that of
others of my friends. And would cheer
fully recommend the use of Peruna, as
l certainly do endorse your medicine. "
Catsrrh Of Heed, Nose, Jhroat.
Mr.. Charles Levy, 80 Allen St., New
York, N. Y, writes;
II am very glad to tell you of the
cures wrought by Peruna in my family.
my son. aged seven, who had ca
tarrh of the nose, was cured by two
bottles of Pernna, and had catarrh OF
the head, nose, throat and ears. One
bottle of Peruna cured me-"
pe-ru-na Jo6lets:-Some people prefer
tablets, rather than medicine in a fluid
form. Such people can obtain Peru.
ma Tablets, which represent the solid
medicinal ingredients of Peruna.
Ask Your Druggist for Free Peruna
Almanac for 1908.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
Took Advantage of Cars Hobby.

Peter the Great particularly delight
ed in drawing teeth, and he strictly
enjoined his servants to send for him
when anything of that sort was to be
done. One day his favorite valet de
chambre seemed very melancholy;
the car asked him what was the mat
ter. "Oh, your majesty" said the man,
my wife is suffering the greatest
agony from toothache, and she OBJ
stinately refuses to have the tooth
taken out IF that is all" said Peter,
I'VE will soon cure it; take me to her
at once" When they arrived, the wom-
an declared that she was not suffering
at all; there was nothing the matter
with her. That is the way she talks,
your majesty" said the valet; she is
suffering tortures.' Hold her head
and hands" said the car; Il will
have it out in a moment" And he in
s,ant.y pulled our the indicated Tooth
with great d"x:er:yv. amid prCtuse
thanks from !he husband. What was
Peters indignation TO discover a little
later that his valet had used him as an
executioner to punish his wife, who
had never had an unsound tooth in her
head-San Francisco Argonaut.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
SOMETHING OF A cYNlc.
Papa Had Extreme Views on the Sub
ject of Marriage.

Miss Marie Cahill, the actress, chose
the chorus girls for her new play,
Marrying Mary" by measurement.
The Bertillon system was employed
by this excellent system of meas
urement." said Miss Cahill the other
day, lone gets, in a chorus girl, the
real thing. Mirage is avoided. You
know what mirage is? Quite sure?
Well, at any rate. I'll point out it's
meaning to you with a story.
"a boy looked up from his book
one night.
Father he said, what is a mi
rage?
''The father answered glibly from
behind his paper:
The union of man and woman
till death or the law them do part
But said the boy, that's mar
riage, amt it?'
Same thing, sonny: it's the same
thing replied the father A man
imagines he sees wonders and delights
where there is nothing. Fight shy of
'em both, my boy"
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
WeIl.MuscIed Boy.

A few weeks ago in village few
miles from Mexico City citizen went
to the alcalde and complained that a
boy ten years old had stolen and car
ried away his donkey. He insisted
that the boy had carried the animal
on his shoulder. The police laughed
at the idea, but when the lad was ar
rested it was shown that the state
ment was true. The boy had carried
a gooJ-sized donkey quarter of a
mile on his shoulder without a stop.
He did the trick again for the benefit
of the police.
Various tests were made of his
strength, and it was found that he had
the muscle of two ordinary men. He
is in Jail now. but when he comes out
the people will have to look out that
he doesn't carry off their houses some
night.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
HAD NO DOUBT OF HIS FATE.
Mr.. Jerome Evidently Was Aware O
His Wife's Culinary Ability.

Some weeks ago the wife of Judge
Blank, of Pacific avenue, lost her cook,
and since she had no other resource
she rolled up her sleeves and for a
week provided such meals &C the Judge
had not enjoyed since those happy
days when the Blanks did not keep
cook. The judges delight was so great
that by way Of appreciative acknowl-
edgment he presented Mrs. Blank
with beautiful ermine cloak. Quite
naturally, the incident was a good
deal noised about among the social
acquaintance of the Blanks and a
spirit of envious emulation was de-
veloped in certain quarters. 1t was in
this mood that Mrs. Jerome recited
the story to her husband. What do
get, Jerry?" she asked, IF l will do
the cooking for a week." We'll"
said Mr.. Jerome, lat the end of a
week, my dear, you'll get one of those
long crepe wells. San Francisco
Argonaut.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13

Nearly all brides are getting sore
on cut glass for wedding presents, be-
cause they always get SO much more
than they can ever USE" remarked 4
jeweler recently, "but l never heard of
one going so far to block the cut glass
as little bride that was in here the
other day.
She told me her name and asked
me if I wouldn't keep my ears cooked
for any customer who might come in
10 buy a wedding present and men,
ton her name. My part of the game
wos tC tell the customer that she had
dropped remark about not caring for
cut glass. She said she had been to two
other stores and fixed up the same
dea! with them"
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
One Thino Held Him Back

There was a racket of some kind
in our house last night said the man
who lives in a fiat building. Screams
came from one of the rear fats and
everybody was looking out the win
dows to see what the matter could be.
Various EXPLANATIONS and conjectures
were made by the rubbernecks and
soon several women were screaming
in sympathy. Presently out of the
awful din rose a deep masculine voice
exclaiming in evaporation and with
the manner of one feeling around in
the dark: I'D &c for a policeman if
l could find my pants!'
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13

At a mems cafe one night a young
Americana barber-fell in with an
Englishman. The latter was berating
the Yankees for doing all manner of
business in their shops and not follow
ing the better English plan of sticking
to one branch.
The next day he staggered into the
barber shop to be shaved. The barber
gave his face an extra good soaping
and left him, at the same time seating
himself to read.
The Englishman kept quiet for a
few minutes. when. seeing his attend
ant reading. he blurted out: why
don't you shave me, sir?'
"You will have to go up the street
for your shave quietly replied the
barber. I'VE only lather here"
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
Deafness Cannot Be Cured

BY local applications as they cannot reach the dis
deafness, and that is by remedies
Deafness 1s caused by an infaned condition Of the
mucous lining Of the Eustachtan Tube. When this
tube is infamed you have rumbling sound or i'm
perfect hearing and when 1t is entirely closed Deaf
ness fs the result and unless the Inflammation
taken out and this tube restored its condi-
ton, hearing will be destroyed forever; nine cases
out Of ten are caused by Catarrh, which is nothing
but an indamed condition of the mucous surfaces.
We will give One Hundred Dollars for any OF
Deafness tcaused by catarrh) that cannot be cured
by Halls Catarrh Cure. Send for circulars free.
+. J. CHENEY & CO., Toledo, O..
Sold by Druggists. 75c.
Take HALLS Family Pills for constipation.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
Woman of Economic Strain.

OF small economics the following
will be difficult to beat for smallness.
A laboringman who hands over his
weekly wages to his wife is allowed
by her an ounce of tobacco a week.
She buys it herself in two separate
half ounces-in order, she declares, to
get the advantage of the two turns of
the scale.-London Chronicle.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
NEW STRENGTH FOR OLD PACKS.
No Need to Suffer Every Day from
Backache.
Mrs. Joannah Straw, 526 North
Broadway, Canton, S. D., says: For

three years I suf-
t re- everything
with rheumatism in
my limbs and a
dull, ceaseless ach-
ing in my back. I
was weak. languid,
broken with head
aches a n d dizzy
spells, and the kill
ney secretions were
thick with solids.
l was really in q
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13

William j. Bryan, speaking OF
President Roosevelt's suggestion of
national incorporation of railroads,
rightly declares that the result would
be to extend greatly the powers of the
general government and proportion
ally reduce the powers of the states;
that the president seemed to believe
that the further we get government
away from the people the better it is.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
He Knew Her.

Mrs. Highhyer-Yes, George was
away behind in his alimony, said money
was tight and all that, but l brought
him around.
The Platonic Friend-How did you
manage It?
Mrs. Highflyer-Oh, / wrote him
little letter threatening to go back and
live with him.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13

critical condition when I began with
Doan's Kidney Pills, and they certain
~ did wonders for me. Though I am
81 years old, l am as well as the
average woman of SO. l work well
eat well and sleep WE'LL
Sold by all dealers. so cents box
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, n. Y.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
Couldn't Divide the Cook.

Sergeant-How are your master and
mistress getting on now? Have they
finally separated?
Cook-No; each one wanted me to
go with them, and as that couldn't be
managed, they agreed to live together
again.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
ANY II Year Old Girl

late and Custard pies as well as the more
experienced cook if she uses 'OUR-PIE''
preparation. which is now sold by nearly
all grocers at 10 cents per package. Just
the proper ingredients in each package.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13

The Caney, Kan, Gas company
brought in another good gas well on
the Frank Savage lease, two miles
east of town. The well is good for
sixteen million cubic feet of gas a
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
ln,portant to Neotneys,

Never tell evil of man, If you do
not know it for certainty, and If you
know it for certainty, thou ask your
self, why should tell it?''-Lavater
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
Plunkville Parson.

But your minister is gruff."
Kinder"
And chews tobacco
Were satisfied. Them sort don't
run much to affinities or sech is our
nce."-Washington Herald.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
ReconciIed to the Inevitable.

''The only thing I can recommend in
your case" said the surgeon, "is a
long journey"
well. if it has to be, doc" the pa
tient groaned, "get out your whiting
tools and go ahead with the opera
ton"
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13

America is the land of the free,
where one must pay for everything
worth having.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13

A woman is seldom satisfied with a
purchase unless she can make herself
believe that she got more than her
moneys worth.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13

FITS, st. Vitus Dance and all Nervous
Diseases permanently cured by DR.. kline's
Great Nerve Restorer. Send for Free $500
trial bottle and treatise. DR.. r. H. Kline,
Id. 931 Arch ST., Philadelphia, Pa.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13

If there were not so many different
ways of lying more people would tel
the truth.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
HOW He Did II.

Early in the morning session, when
the pupils were feeling bright and
happy, the teacher thought it a good
plan to give them sentences to cor
rect, both as to grammar and sense.
She accordingly wrote on the black
board:
1.-The hen has four legs. He
done it."
Thoughtful little Ignatius, at the
foot of the class, pondered deeply, and
at the end of Is minutes time, allowed
for correction. he wrote:
"He didn't done it; God done it,
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13
RATHER A POINTED RERukE.
Minister'S Amendment to Usual Gracs
Fitted Circumstances.

A Pennsylvania divine formed one
of. a house-party in Philadelphia
where the younger son, in accordance
with what the clergyman observed to
be his constant habit, as soon as he
had seated himself at breakfast i'm
mediately possessed himself of large
slice of bread, the quality of which he
proceeded to test by a liberal mouth
full.
The minister, stickler in such mat
tiers of propriety, gazed blandly at
him for moment or SO; then he fold
ed his hands and closed his eyes in
preparation for grace.
For what we are about to receive"
he intoned with painful emphasis,
land for what our young friend has
already received, Lord, make us truly
hankful"-Harper's Weekly.
Mean Revenge.
A man had been very badly treated
by the proprietors of boarding
house, and when in temporary finan-
cial difficulties had been forced to
leave. Some time later, smiled upon
by tickle fortune, he achieved success
and prosperity as a popular dentist,
and soon found means to revenge his
former landlady's slight. The method
he adopted was simple but extremely
effective, quite running the business Of
his enemy. Directly opposite the
boarding house he opened his new
dental establishment, and upon the
largest window in bold letters ap-
peared the following notice: "Steel-
pointed boarding house teeth a spe-
cialty!"
Laundry work at home would be
much more satisfactory if the right
Starch were used In order to get the
desired stiffness, it is usually neces-
sary to use so much starch that the
beauty and fineness of the fabric is
hidden behind a paste of varying
thickness, which not only destroys the
appearance, but also affects the wear
ing quality of the goods. This trou-
BILE can be entirely overcome by using
Defiance Starch, as it can be applied
much more thinly because of its great
er strength than other makes.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13

With a smooth iron and Defiance
Starch, you can launder your shirt
waist Just as well at home as the
steam laundry can; it will have the
proper stiffness and finish, there will
be less wear and tear. of the goods,
and it will be a positive pleasure to
use Starch that does not stick to the
iron,
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13

Some people never fool themselves
more than when they think they are
fooling others.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13

Thy sum of duty let two words con-
tain--Be humble and be just.-Horace
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13

An old bachelor says that some wom-
en- marry for the purpose of obtaining
a listener who can't get away.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13

There are countless roads on all
sides to the grave.-Cicero.
The wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-????, 1907-12-13

ONLY ONE "BRONIO OUININE''
the signature Of H. W. Grove. Used the VOID lE
over to Cure Cold in One Day. Csc.
The semi-weekly messenger. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1897-1908, 1907-04-12
BEGIN THEIR SENTENCES.

TweDty-One Prisoner Sent TO CoEaty
Roads and Farm Yesterday.
The prisoners in the county Sal wks
court last week and sentenced TO the
county home and roads were yegtSgG2y
sent out TO begin their terms Of sRIyiSs
Not a prisoner was sentenced by tie
conrt to go TO the state DeniteAtka,y
Altogether Fl prisoners were sent out
yesterday to begin their senteAets. u
of these being males and four females.
The men will work on the roads and
The women will work on the county
farm.
The exodus from the Jail led a face
tious lawyer yesterday in couTi 10
write the following advertise HeRt
which he handed to Sheriff Covan md
advised hin to have published:
HOTEL DE CAPPS.
Opposite Opera House)
Newly painted. enlarged and thor
oughly renovated at considerable e1-
pense. Nice airy, burglar proof
roOm5, absolute security. American
plan. Plenty OF rooms--anv cxpogur4
Only five guests at present. al te-
commodate at once p guests. and pos-
sibly more should recorder bin pags
Those coming first will b. pycr
choice OF rooms.
The semi-weekly messenger. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1897-1908, 1907-04-12
Work Oh Track Laying OH the Norfolk
and Southern Railway Being Pushed
RaEidIy-Danlaoc Done to Tobacco
Plants BY Cold SI,eiI-Charters
Grantcd-WCather Bureau Report.
Raleigh, April 8.

raleigh, April >.
Insurance Commissioner Young to-
day admitted to do business in this
state the Interstate Fire Insurance
Company of Suffolk, Va, the general
agent being ". A. White of Green
Vile.
The commissioner paid in the state
treasury as March collections s9.411.
This makes the total for the physical
year Of his department, which ended
March 81. s25,332, an increase Of s1O,-
600 over the previous year. In 1898,
the year before he took charge, the
collections were only $S4,879. The
increase annually has been from S.
900 to $4,000.
A special interview was had today
with State Entomologist Sherman,
who has two assistants in the field ex-
aiming the fruit TO e what dam
age the cold weather has done. He
says that west of the Blue Ridge
plums, peaches and cherries are pref
" we'll killed, but that the prospect
is yet for a very good Cop of apples
in that section. In the piedmont Sec
ton there will be at least a half croD
The semi-weekly messenger. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1897-1908, 1907-04-12

has enjoyed it's finest s OF o1oS'
nerity, the new comers to Wilmington
often on thu streets appearing to Out
number the old residents. The censu
bureau with it's arithmctical system
may tickle the fancy OF Charlotte, but
the unreliable, incorrect and seemingly
absurd method Of computation will not
be cause sufficient to make Wilmington
take the background and admit herself
in second place.
Il statement given out from his of
fetal figures recently by City Building
Inspector Bonitz showed that during
the past four years, 1903. 1904. 1905
and 1906, the total number of new res
dences erected was $50. costing an ag-
gresa!c Of a million dollars. This
does not include nearly a hundred
mer ';tltile establishments erected dun
ing the same time, at an OUTLAY 81
about 500. 600.
In 1906 alone there were SAG resi-
dence& erected, at a total cost of S4J0,-
600. All these new homes, 123 in 1915;
1874 II 1904; 227 in 1905. and $40 III
1906, certainly were not built for show
and the fact that there is hardly u va
cant house in Wilmington is testimony
thH: all of these homes are occuaicd.
In foGr years $50 res ':4nces were built
and Cnly $50 persons men, women AID
children have come to the city ir six
years to occupy them, according &c
Washington estimates.
ais gafi .-iinj-im xuhWt
The semi-weekly messenger. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1897-1908, 1907-04-12
l;EGiNS SIN MONTHS SENTENCE,

Thomas PapIar. Tricd fuf. DeScrtio.
FROM the Cutter. j. in tho County
jail. ~
Thomtc Poplar, a ccaman from the
feVenu" cutter Seminole, who doeeItcy
ana was caught on "A vessel at sea and
arrested. was tried by ? General Ser
vice Court, convened under order OF
March 18th. composed Of First s5eu-
tenant Satterlee, Second Lieutenant
traDster mt Third Lieutenant lone.
and sentenced 10 six months ia III.
jail OF New Hanover county.
The sentence was Dasaed ~e,eyaI
days ago, but it had to be s1t y.
washington for approval by the secye-
tary OF the treasury. His approval wax
received yesterday and Poplar was
to prison and placed in crs,odx
Of Jailer Caps.
Poplar not only will have to serv.
SIX months confinement, but he forfeit.
All pay now due him or which NAV he
come d him, and when he is nbeyat-
ed Dc will be ~dishonorably disohargas
from the service.