Las Vegas daily optic. [volume] (Las Vegas, N.M.) 1880-1908, 1907-03-02

k0A6 EA1o1aoAh WINS ~
A NORRIS CHAIR.
ual with care. from the toothache and
appendicitis mp to the troileys. theaters
aud theosophy. Did you ever think.
Dr. sguills. of what a ane thing II
would be to operate on the body polite
for n case Of municipal appendicitis"
Il have never let my mind dwell
upon 10 fertile a field for thought-no."
said the doctor. at would be rather
difficult. wouldn't itT
Il suppose Il would" returned the
idiot. II suppose IL would be next to
impossible to etherize the whole city
government before you began to crap
pie around In Its insides after the Of
tending vermiform, but II 1t could be
done wouldn't II be fine? Just think
of getting rid Of all the useless aud In
famed members of the body polite a
easily as man now sheds his personally
conducted trouble with his innards."
"Do you really believe that govern
ment could run the trolleys as well as
they are run by individuals" asked
MIR. Brief.
'If they couldn't they'd better 60 out
of business" said the idiot. Il don't
see why they can't run street railways
az we'll as they run the street manicur'
ing department. And think how nice 1t
would be - how much envy, hatred
and malice would disappear-if the
people owned the trolley! For instance.
when you and / see Mr.. ]. Willieboy
Duckington hiking up the pike In hts
automotronble'-
His what?" demanded the lawyer.
His automotrouble." said the idiot.
ats a machine run by gasoline that
breeds trouble Of Its own power. When
we see old willieboy scooting along In
his car you and l turn pale pink with
envy because we haven't anything OF
the kind to keep Us awake nights and
before the police courts Of all the u
ties 'twixt Cattaraugus and kenne-
bunk. We're too poor to pay even for
that long and ~tolerably consistent
scent that lies In the trail of II. and we
gnash our teeth to think that we never
can get our pictures In the Sunday
papers because we shall never W one
OF those machines. But II we as Cit
Eens Of this metropolis owned the troll
leys II would be different. When the
Green avenue and Gompers square car
goes by we would look at Its brilliantly
III electric interior and smile with sat
isfaction. That II my new Whining
ton.' we'd say to u country cousins
who were visiting US. Then we'd nod
politely to the chauffeur, and he'd stop
and take us aboard. and by and by
the conductor would come through and
hand us all a nickel
What In thunder are you talking
about? What on earth would the
conductor hand you a nickel for?" de.
manded the lawyer.
For riding on the car. of course
said the idiot. That's the scheme
Isn't it,"
'Oh, Is III" laughed the lawyer
"well. gdess that's the way som,
people look at It. What Is your pre-
else idea Of municipal ownership, any
how?'
why" said the idiot. "es I under
stand the propaganda Of the NJ. q
people as ~expounded on the eiitoria
pages of the sporting extras of tn
New York Evening Brisbane and tn
Chicago Daily William Randolph, mu
nicipaJ ownership means the grabhin:
of everything In sight that has a cas-
register and a meter attached to Il
sending the original owners TO Jail 70
life and managing what's left for tn
benefit of the people, In the case O
the trolleys all the enormous profit
derived from the ne%farious practic
now In operation OF carrying a passes
ger ninety miles for a nickel are to b