The Yale expositor., 1907-08-23


We were playing Ten Nights in a
Bar Room" and had been doing a rat
Ting business for a spell. You see,
most O. those people out there are
ketched by title, and Ten Nights in
Bar Room" looked good TO them. 1t
seemed kind O. sociable-like, with
plenty o gambin and shootin' irons,
and chaps droppin' in to pass the time
o day, and hot stove with the boys
sittin around it and swappin' lies over
their liquor
But when II got to be spread around
the country that We were a strictly
moral show-a kind o dramatic argu-
ment for temperance and signin' the
pledge-why it's surprising the way
receipts fell off. So wien we got to
Pikeville we were drawing about as
good as a chimbley filled full O
birds nests.
The ghost hadn't walked for so long
that | guess he'd forgot how, and to
make things real interestin' and inn
portant why what does our manager
do but one night skip with all the re-
ceipts. We were dead up against It,
ont about a million miles from home,
more or less, and nothing doing to
annex the long green.
And to make matters still worse,
we were showed in. Yes, sir, it
showed like | never see it snow be-
fore. You wouldn't believe it, but
for five days she never let up.
Well, sir, there we were-the hull
II of us, including the company. and
me and Tommy Bagsby, who played
the heavy and did the press agent
stunts. We were stoppin' at the
United States hotel, and for a time
they treated us like white people.
but it wasn't long after our manager
skidooed before they sized us up for
a bunch of crooks. You see, it makes
a lot of difference in the show bust
ness how you succeed.
Well, sir, there we were stranded
on the foot hills, and not enough OF
the long green in the crowd TO pay
our hotel BILL to say nothing of trans.
portation back to Times Square. We
were up against it for fair-but say
do you know Tommy Bagsby? No?
Well, he's 1t. Tommy's all the mus
tard when it comes to the ways and
means committee. We had been
showed in nearly a week, living on
tick, and pretty poor tick at that
when Tommy decided that something
must be done to raise the dough.
You see, the snow had come down
so deep that you couldn't break
through it with a keg o dynamite
1t was piled up a mile high in the
cutters and out in the middle of the
street where the storekeepers had
thrown it when they shoveled off the
finally a horse couldn't pull sleigh
through it-he just sank down to his
shoulders and stuck.
Well, the town council gets move
on and advertises for bids immediate
to remove the snow along Main street
And here's where Tommy butted in
1t seems he had a bunch on what il
would cost to get rid of that snow
by the old-fashioned method Of SHOW
cling IL in carts and houling it away
with teams. Tommy figured it would
come to about a thousand dollars, sc
what does he do but put in a bid fol
eight hundred.
Well, sir, the council nearly threw
a fit when they heard Tommys bid
1t seemed too good TO be true, but
Tommy just stood right up in meetin
and handed them out a beautifu
spiel, and they agreed to let him have
whack at the snow cleaning PROPOSE
ton, provided they wasn't to pay un
til the snow was good and off,
Finally somebody asks him where
he was going to hire his horses anC
carts, and whether he was going tc
employ union men or scabs, and
Tommy just smiles real confident, anC
says, kind o. gentle and reprovin'
that he didn't have in mind to employ
any horses or carts, and for that mat
ter, any men, either.
You ought to "a seen the eyes o
them councilmen bung out. At first
they thought Tommy was dippy, but
then they decided that maybe he had
invented some new kind of a machine
for removin' snow, so they kept mum
and let him go ahead with the Job.
You see, il was this way. Thi.
town is situated, like l said, near the
foot hills, and the streets are pretty
steep. 1t starts way up at the foo
of a ridge, and then comes down al
most like ladder, and slopes right
through the business section of the
town, which was the part the council
wanted scraped off. What does Tommy
do but put an advertisement in the 10
cal papers that run something like
this:
BOYS AND GIRLSl-A CHANCE To
make Five Dollars! A SNOWFALL rollins
contest will take place next Saturday
morning at ten o'clock. from the ridg,
OF the head of Main street. To the DO,
or girl who succeeds in rolling IN,
largest SNOWFALL down to the foot o.
Main street will be given a prize of fiv,
dollars Just think of it-FIVE DOL,
LARS! for n little fun Every school
boy and schoolgirl is entitled to a chanc,
nj this fine prize.-Thomas Bagsby Ref
cree United States Hotel
Well, say, can you beat It? Do yot
hfU haoIth,,