Bisbee daily review., 1907-01-17
HOME OF THE FRENCH PRESIDENT.

1nd ten servants to wait on me? Noi if my name vhas Mary Jane. go in to make you governor und knock all trusts sky high. Hang out your ban ners und hurrar for our si2er'
 Der next person to come in vhas der coal man. He brings two old shoes of his wife's und holds 'em out to me und says:
 Hans. you see how it vhas init der coal business. Everybody says we vhas a trust und grinding down der poor. but does dot look like it? My wife can't go to church because she has no shoes, und 1 have to walk be- cause l can't afford to ride. tell you 1t vhas all A mistake. Der peoples have got 6 wrong idea. 1t vhas der peoples who vhas grinding der trusts down"
 But you shump oop der price of coal when nottlngs vhas doing" says.
 But 1t vhasn't to make money. It yhas to teach people to place more value OF der coal und keep 1t covered up avhay from der rats. Dere yhas so little money In der coal business dot sell out und go to chopping wood. If you vhas governor don't make a fool of yourself Come to me before you do anything und let me show you by my books dot live on turnips on all last winter shust to accommodate der peoples"
 Pooty queek when he vhas gone a man init a red face comes In und slams pair of shoes down on der counter und shouts at me:
 Hans. don't you make some fools of yourselfF'
 How"
 By stirring cop der peoples. Nobody vhas complaining now. All yhas will ing to be robbed by trusts. rebaters und grafters. Here vhas some shoes to mend, und my boy shall bring some more. I vhant you to let me alone"
 "Und what business vhas you in?" asks.
 Der ice business. You know we have a very open winter und na ice around here. Dot makes prices high dis sum. mer"
 But dot vhas only some excuse. Ice vhas plenty all over New England"
 But you keep still und your ice yhas half price. Dot vhas rebates. Der only man who kicks about rebates vhas der man who don't get any''
 When der iceman goes ayhay der milkman comes in. He has a wife und six childer, und he was never in my place before. He now has four pairs of shoes to be mended, und he smiles und says:
 "so you like to run for governor, eh"
 q do"
 'Vhell, dot vhas all right. Der peo- pies believe you to be an honest man, und you can depend on my vote. I see by your platform dot you vhas down on trusts"
 ''i shall make 1t hot for 'em."
 Dots right, Hans; make it hot for 'em, but at der same time don't make some mistakes"
 "Howp
 Peoples vhas mistooken when dey speak about a milk trust. It vhas sim ply an organization to buy Bibles for the heather in Africa. When der price of milk goes cop we buy more Bibles. When der price of butter goes oop dot vhas to furnish hymn books. Every time you buy a pound of butter or quart of milk you are helping the heather. Please understand dot und don't fool init der milk und butter busl- ness"
 Der milkman goes out und der fat policeman comes in. He looks at me in a mournful vhay und says:
 Hans. I don't believe you vhas any sooch man."
 "HowT' I asks.
 You like to take der bread out of my mouth"
 ''In what vhay?"
 You vhas going to be elected gov ernor und stop grating. How can der police force get along if you do dot9 Do you like to see us all go by der poorhouse?'
 T don't like it." I says.
 But it vhas custom. Everybody vhas used to it. Nobody complains. If n man finds me asleep in a saloon he grafts me. If I find somebody drunk I graft him. It vbas one hand wash der other, und nobody vhas hurt Cop to dis time I make you fix my shoes for nottings. Alter dis shall pay you. Go for der plumber and coal man, Hans, but give us honest men a chance"
 Dot day more ash twenty peoples come into my shop nit shoes to mend, und everybody vhas my friendt. Just before I shut oop in der evenings der cooked eyed tramp comes around He sees all der shoes to be mended. und be sees der smile on my face. und he says:
 @Cuily, when you vhas in trouble con salt cock eyed man. What he doesn't know about human nature you can't fiLd out from der undertaken. A cock eyed man don't take good photo graph. but when it comes down to solid advice he vhas all dere und sometings to spare" M. QUAD.