davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24
He Mas Too hastx.

Appointment automobilist condemned
scorching at dinner.
II condemn" he said, ''scorching and
the scorcher, but don't condemn the
scorcher unheard. l don't condemn
the accused man hastily. Hasty con
demnation is always a mistake. Once
on a Canadian railway l got of the
train for five minute luncheon at 9
railway eating bar There was man
beside me gobbling away, and when he
finished / heard him say bitterly, as
he took out his purse;
"'Call that a ham sandwich It's
the worst ham sandwich ever ate
No more taste than sawdust and sc
small you could hardly see It,
"'Ye've ct yer ticket said the wait
er. This here's yer ham sandwich
Philadelphia Bulletin.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24
A Exemnlihed.

A learned professor was dining with
the Diltzes and the table was set with
the best ware that Mrs. Diltz's china
closet afforded. The guest was par
ticularly interested in the display and
admired it greatly. Picking up the
plate In front of him and noting the
stamp of the manufacturer on the bot
tom of it, he remarked:
II presume you know that china, or
the art of making it, was discovered by
ACCIDENT"
Just then there was heard In the
kitchen, where the maid was busily at
work. loud crash.
yes" answered Mrs. Diltz, with a
panied smile, land most Of 1t Is broken
in the same way."-Youth's Companion.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24
Wigs and Fans.

'"There Is one thing l want to warn
you about" said the wigmaker to the
man who was buying his first wig,
land that is the electric fan. When
ever you see an electric fan In motion
give 1t wide berth. If you don't 1t is
apt to embarrass you. Electric fans
and wigs are deadly enemies. Moth
ing outside of an Indian and toma-
hawk VIII lift wig from the wear
er's head quicker than an electric fan
in motion. New York Sun.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24

Like the Athenians of Old, most peo-
pie are vainly searching for some new
thing, only to look upon 1t when they
find it with suspicion. OF the vast
majority it is as true today as it was
first written
They eat. they drink. they sleep. they
plod
They go to church on Sunday,
And many are afraid Of God,
And more OK Mrs GFundy.
London Ladies' Field.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24
Continuous conklnn,

New York is a place of continuous
cooking" said the woman from the
west. walk along any street at any
time and you will get Whit of coffee
and broillng meat There doesn't
seem to be any set time for meals.
Judging by the smell, breakfast Is q
movable feast that takes place any
time between 6 o'clock and noon."-
New York Post.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24
Ne Waen,t = oorroard-

That wary old fellow, Bailie Macduff,
was ent1ced into a friends, house the
other night, and his host managed to
win 30 shlllings from him at map"
What is more remarkable, when the
bailie had parted with his last shilling
he rose, full Of wrath.
wont you stay to supper" pressed
his host. I'VE have a fine bit of ham
waiting"
mo, not L Dae ye think l eat 80
shillings' worth of ham ?"-London An
6wers.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24
He Was an Expers At FIeures.

After an absence Of several years a
one time cavalier OF lady called on
her. He found her In the company Of
her three children
"well, WE'LL" he said. "And how old
are theyf"
"Johnpy," answered the lady, SIS
seven. Julia is five and Maud Is two"
Dear meF' he cried. alarm In his
voice us 1t possible time dies IKE
thatY Who would think that you had
been married fourteen years 7"-Phila-
dalphia Ledger.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24
Tommy Chained His SCOT.

Teacher-Can the leopard change his
spots? Now, Tommy, answer mel
Tommy-Yes, sir; he can. Teacher
NonsenseI How can he7 Tommy
Well, sir, when he's tired Of sitting In
one spot he can change to another,
can't he, sir?-Winnipeg Telegram.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24
More Appropriate.

Reggy Sapp-The idea Of Miss Wose
leaving me and saying she had other
fish to fry! Do you think that was
proper?
Miss Tabasco-I should say noti She
should have said she had other Holsters
to broil.-Chicago News.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24
CAMDEN AND SUBURBAN RAILWAY co

Leave MOORESTOWN every 10 minutes
from 5.42 until lU.42 a. m; then every 81 MN
utes until 4.l2 D. M; then every 10 minutes uI.a
til q ~ o. m; then every 30 minutes until ILL.,
o. M; then every hour as per night car
Leave FERRY sos, 5.3s, Cos 6.ss a. M; then
every 10 minutes until 9.3S a. IN; then every ~
minutes until 3.3S p. M; then every 10 minutes
until 1888 d. m; then every 81 minutes until
luu8 D. M; then ll0S and 12O6; then every
hour as per night car schedule.
Leave MERCHANTVILLE every minutes
from 5.S2 a. IN. until 9.27 a. H.; then every III
minutes until Az p. M; then every minutes
until S.L d. m; then every III minutes until
lI-47 o. m; then as per night car schedule.
Leave FERRY at SUB and 5.3S a. M then
every 10 minutes until 55S m; then every
minutes until S.5S a M; then every IL min
utes until 1. SIS p. M; then every minutes I'M
tiI75S D. M; then every 10 minutes until l2OS
midnig Int then every hour as per night car
schedule
NIGHT CAR-DAILY AND SUNDAY.
Leave Moorestown, .02. 202 302, 4.02 a. m.
Leave Ferry, .l0S, 2.08, 3OS, 4.OS a. IN.
1Iast trip on Saturday nigh.
"a connect with Mount Holly cars at Stanwick
avenue.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24
TROLLEY TIME TABLES.
BURLINGTON COUNTY RAILWAY co.

In connection with Camden and Suburban
Railway Company.
In effect April g. 1907.
Leave. Fountain, Mount Holly, for Curling
ton AT a52O a. m and every hour thereafter
to and including lilo p. m.
Leave Broad and High streets, Burlington
for Mount Holly at Gus a. M and every houi
thereafter until and including IL .0S p. m
Last car ll.05 p. m.
Leave Fountain, Mount Holly, for Moores
town and Camden at $40, GA a. m. and every
half hour thereafter until and including S.i4
%. M. then 9.44 10 "A, 11.% p. N.
Leave Camden Ferry for Mount Holly al
6.G3, 5.3S a. m. and every half hour thereafter
until and including S.O8 p. m, every houl
thereafter until and including 1l.0S.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24

Cook = Lawksl Here's mistressl
Quick, into the clothes pressI
Soldier Sweetheart-In the clothes
press and not In the harder? Nina,
and you say you love me.-Meggen-
dorfer Batter
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24

Mrs. Benham-I got 1t for ID cents a
yard Benham-Isn't ID an unlucky
number7 Mrs. Benham-Not when IL
Is marked down from 15.-New York
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24
Cutting Down Composition.

VUtGEUB DUWH OUsEEP0SItTUWs
II saved $500 this year by moving"
Cheaper housef"
mo; found that my wife was try
ing to outdress a rich woman In the
same block"
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24

No man can produce great things
who is not thoroughly sincere In deal
ing with himself.-LowelL
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24
WESTWARD
SUNDAY
RID WEEKDAYS

TS--4C
WEEKDA
For Philadelphia, TIC, $40 III. IS Saturday and
Sunday only a. m. 20, 40. $40 (9.4O Satur
day and Sunday only p. m
A delightful twilight and moonlight trip
may be had by taking Steamer Columbia at
4.IO D. m. to Philadelphia and return, arriving
home sos p. m.
Full orchestra on board.
Leave Philadelphia 500 $3.50 Saturday and
Sunday only a. m, loo, 200, 6OO $40 p. IN
Saturday and Sundays.
500 p. m. boat will leave 7.30 p. M on account
of moonlight.
Time table subject to change without notice
Freig bit shipments covered by full marine
Insurance from the time they are received
until delivered to you.
SERVICE BETTER THAN EVER
f. III. STETsER. Gen. Mgr.
K. II. FLAGG, JR.,
Freight and Pas senger Agent.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24
CAMDEN AND TRENTON RAILWAY co.

o Cars Leave Burlington-Broad High 5-42
II IL ll42 1872 l242, r. LAP, 2l2 242 3 u, 342
Az 442, 5l2, 542 6.l2, 642 7.l2, 7.42, s.l2, S42
912 9.42, 1912, ll.42
WEsSTBOUND.
Leave Burlington, Broad and High-60S,
s3S los 73S SUo 49, 9OS. 9.3S, 1908, 10.3S, ll0s,
IS l2US 1888 Us. l.sS, 20S, LBS 3O8, 3.3S, Aus,
3S bUS 5S SOS, 49, 7.S, 7.SS, SUS S.3o, 9Uo, 9'S
LOS Il.(S. l2.OS. LOS.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24
Snake Myths.

Snakes have no medicinal qualities
and the following popular notions are
myths That gals Of snakes are an
antidote for snake bites; that their OF
is good for rheumatism, badness and
deafness; that wearing their skins will
cure rheumatism or stiffness; that q
snake heart, oil or blood is good fol
consumption or other Ills; that snake
flesh should be eaten for blood disor
ders; that a second bite of the snake
In the same place will cure or counter
act the first bite; that rattlers of snakes
are charms.
1t is estimated that there are 10000,
600 Europeans who wear woodeI
shoes. Eastwood Is ordinarily EN-
ployed for sabots, but willow is thu
best material.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24
PETE'S
BAD HOUR.
By FRANK H. SWEET.

Copyrighted, 1907, by P. c. Eastment.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1907-09-24
Following Bigger's
Example.
BY JAMES REILLY.

Copyrighted. 1907. by Mary McKeon.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-04-02
"UNWRITTEN LAWS"

1T has remained for the Pensy vana Legislature to ser
ousy consider the blue ribbon idotc proposition of all
the docy presented before legislatures the past season.
1t is the so-caed Call bill, which proposes that when
person arragned for assault upon the proprietor editor
or manager of newspaper which has published some
thing deamatory concerning the assauter his parent
child sister, wife ance there shall be acQutta II
the fact of false publication proved In short here is
proposed sort of 'unwrtten law One criminal
act is to be punished by another criminal act.
1t is par with all that silly and dangerous senti
nsent which, through recent action of petit juries has
to make it safe for man shoot another down
in cold blood provided the murderer aerward suf-
ceny backen the moral record Of his wife sister in
respect of her relations with the victim
The Call measure is clear bid for the commission of
crime just the unwrten law verdicts pal pabe
inducements for the destruction of the humane and
a principle that innocent until proven guilty by
jury of his peers, which principle applies to crimes
against the family as we'll as against property
There is however always the possibility that the man
who carried out the provisions of the proposed law would
need the services of physician than legal remedies.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-04-02

In NJ Osiris who lately died in France that nation
lost a rich and a good man. a kindly and gen
erous, who had amassed fortune without deraud
ing his fellow men, and who, in dying, left it for noble
and charitable purposes.
Osiris not rich as America counts riches. He was
worth in all $9OOOOO0; but it was gained honestly
He left practically all of it to charity. He made
deru historical collection of relics of the Empress Jose
phne This he leaves to France. The Pasteur Institute
made his sole reslduary egatee account Of its
searches to lessen the scourges Of tuberculosis and
other diseases He also left gifts to his native city of Bor
deaux to six cities he left public school prizes to various
art societies 10000 francs and the Academic de Medi-
cine 2550O He bequeted to teach methods Of
industry for the improvement of general health for the
protection of abandoned children Those who know him
say that the whole of his later life spent in search
ing for and worthy objects of charity.
There is sting in of these gifts
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-04-02
CAPTAIN TAINTED:
NOW ON TRIAL

WASHINGTON, D. c., April g.
There is much interest in Washing
ton, especially in naval circles, on
the outcome of the court-martial
now in progress at Fort Monroe; of
Capt. VIM. Swift, who was on the
bridge of the battleship Connecticut
when she ran aground on the north
ern shore of Cuba.
The case has received added in
terest fro mthe fact that Captain
Swift has been a member of the
general board, and is one of the
officers rated as having very ex
cellent pull. He and his friends
have made quiet but earnest efforts
to avert the court martial. Admiral
Evans promptly ordered a court of
inquiry.
The grounding of the Connecticut
was accompanied by rather unusual
circumstances. 1t seems that the
man who would ordinarily have
been navigating the ship was Lieut..
Commander Chandler, a son of ex-
Senator VIM. e. Chandler. of New
Hampshire. But Capt. Swift him
self had taken command, and
Chandler was looking on.
Although it is not usual thing
to do, Chandler warned the captain
that he was out Of his course. The
warning. however, was disregarded,
and Chandler was ordered to attend
to his own business.
When the vessel struck it is said
that Capt. Swift tainted, and others
took command.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-04-02
The Daily Short Story

Three months ago | was in New
York. | was recognized, arrested
and given until 6 o'clock to get out
of town. l went to Buffalo, and the
same thing happened. | went to
Cleveland, Cincy, Philly, Chi, st.
Louisiana it was always the same.
They won't let me rest, Judge.
It's the police; they know me,
Every time a bull picks me up it
helps his record. The judge says
I'd be a burden to the community
and gives me hours to get away.
I'm like the Flying Dutchpan,
Judge. Let me stay. III Hive
straight. I'm not young any more.
And Pm blind-and-and tired. Let
me stay, judge
The court pondered. The court
uttered platitudes and made use of
the maxim that one must reap
what one has sown. The court re-
GREETED. Then
You have until 6 O'clock" said
the court.
Late that night hostile farm dogs
barked at little old man who slow
ly travelled along lonely road, his
cane feeling the ruts that beset his
feet.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-04-02
BABY BURNS MONEY

MARION, O., April Ellsworth
Carey, 3. son of Walter Carey Of
Agosta, has a mania for burning
up money that would do justice to
a Pittsburg milionaire's son.
Young Ellsworth enjoys touching
matches to $40 bills. Two weeks
ago he stuffed some $40 in bills
into the kitchen stove. A few days
ago he applied a crisp 500 to the
gas jet, He was iii the act of
starting a fire in the parlor CRATE
with SIS check when he mother
iuterN Cned
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-04-02

A passing scissors grinder ring
ing his bell and calling out his
trade, recalled vivid and painful
recollections of the old grindstone
down on the farm.
In the summer it stood beneath
the shade of an old apple trees, be-
hind the corn crib, but in the win
ter it was brought into the wood
shed. Many a backache and blister
that old stone cost me. Many a
half holiday from school it has lost
to me. 1t seemed as if someone
always had an ak to grind when |
wanted to play. While the other
kids were sliding down hill, or skat-
ing. or swimming, or playing ball,
there was |, toiling YEARLY, with
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-04-02
DOWN AND OUT

He was peddling shoestrings
without success. A man, passing,
halted and scrutinlzed his face.
Hello, Slick" he said
The old man shivered. Il know
your voice. all right. You're a bull,
know that; but"
Sure. you remember me-Kil-
liam? Sure you do. The chief'll be
tickled to death to see you, Slick
The detectives hand was on the
peddler's arm. Come on"
Then, for the first time, he no
ticed that the old mans eyes looked
straight ahead and that he stepped
haltingly.
What's thls?" the detective
asked. "Phony"
"No phony this time, bo," the
peddler replied. my eyes went
back on me the last bit | did. I'm
down and out, that's all. Call the
wagon"
The prosecutor whispered to the
judge. The judge turned inferred
eyes upon the prisoner.
Whats the charger asked the
court.
"Vagrancy, your honor"
who's the officer?'
The detective took the stand. He
related the circumstances of the ar
rest. He had seen the prisoner
twice before. Knowing he had
record, he had thought it best to
bring him in.
He's been a bad one. Judge,
said the detective. Diamonds were
his graft He worked with Sophie
Lyons and Denny Gum and Soapy
Farr. He was Sophie's pal until
she threw him down for Denny.
He's done time in France and Eng
land and half dozen times in this
country. His mugs in every gal
lery. Hes stolen more than a mil
lion dollars worth of diamonds in
his time. they say. He's had any
number Of aliases. but he's best
known as Slici Weldon. Ten years
ago there wasn't a better dressed
man anywhere than Slick Weldon,
and he had diamonds all over him,
He never pulled off anything but
big Jobs. and he always had plenty
of fall money for good lawyers
when he got caught. He's down and
out now, though | guess. But,
knowing he had record, thought
ought to bring him in"
The detective stepped down.
"Well, Weldon
TIE prisoner strained sightless
ewes i'm the direction of the court,
in the manner of those who have
not long been blind. Only one skill
ed in remembering faces would
have recognized in the prisoner
the dapper, dangerous diamond
thief of former years.
"All the officer says is true the
prisoner began. 81 was gun and
diamonds were my graft. served
time in Newgate and the galleys OF
France, and in Sing Sing and Joliet
| was Sophie Lyons pal until she
threw me down for Denny Gum
| All that's true, and there's a lo
more.
But. your honor, was punished
for every big job that the police
could put on me. served my time
Wasn't that enough? And now In
blind, Judge. couldn't steal II
wanted to. I'm down and out, an
all want is q place to stay.
wouldn't hurt anybody. | can max
living peddling. But the polio
| won't let me.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-04-02
HUGHES FINED $3.50

Larry Hughes, well known min
ing man Of this city, was arraigned
before Judge Sullivan yesterday
He pleaded guilty to the charge OF
having attacked Nicholas George
bartender of the Washington sa
loon, with deadly weapon, and
was fined $3.50.
Hughes offense is alleged to
have been the outgrowth of hot
words which ensued over false &C
cusations made by George.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-04-02
ITALIANS ON TEAR

LIND, Wash, April Fifty
shots were exchanged. Italian
was killed and all guests were
driven from the bar-room Of the
Lind hotel by gang of 60 drunken
Italian railroad laborers. Town
Marshalls Jensen and Taylor, aided
by posse of armed citizens, finally
succeeded in driving them back to
their freight car quarters.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-04-02

my soul full of anguish and misery,
everlastingly turning that squeakly,
creaking, wobbly old stone.
If it wasn't my father it was the
hired man or some neighbor who
would say, patting me on the head,
Sonny, turn tn grindstone fer me
jest a few minnits. That's a good
boy"
And the minutes would be hours
and the hours would seem days. |
would proudly muscle up" my arm
before the other kids, could wra5tle,
or play ball all day without feeling
it. but, oh, how sick and tired and
weak | would always feel when
someone had an ak to grind.
BUSHNELL.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-04-02
TlE-UP IN TACOMA

TACOMA, April about $50
teams belonging to the Team Own
ers' Protective association of this
city were called out on a strike yes
terday afternoon in consequence
of employers refusal to grant a
raise of from $3.50 per day to IS
per day. About 100000 worth OF
street work is tied up.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-04-02
BLIND "AD" BRIDE DIES
WHEN HOME BURNS

DES MONIES, April Carrie
Tillotson, a wealthy blind woman,
was burned to death in her home
in starting a fire. Several weeks
ago she advertised for husband
and was about to make a selection
from nearly 100 men who had pro-
posed.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-04-02
Notice

Housewives, we want you to buy
pure food bread, cakes and pies
where quality and quantity are alb
solute,y guaranteed. Home made
bread, cakes, rolls and buns, fresh
every day. NEW HOME BAKERY
o1824 Division ST., Corner Indiana
c. Robert, Prop.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-04-02
A WORD FROM JOSH WISE.

"Babber's wife always seems to
be happy"
She is. Babber humors her by
allowing her to catch him in one
lie a day"
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-04-02

eve stand by the mule" SAYS the
Augusta (MoD Herald. All right.
partner, stand there, but after it's
all over don't say you didn't know
1t was loaded,
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-04-02
New Shirt
Patterns

You will need one of those
new shirt patterns to be in har-
mony and keeping with your
wife'S or sweetheart new
waist. Go to the Wonder for it.
They are priced for every taste
and every purse, each 75c to 81
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-04-02
Hosiery

We are showing many new
features in mems fancy hose.
Each season the manufactures
adds new laurels to his berth in
the production of fine footwear.
The colored isles in stripes and
checks are specially pleasingf
the mode shades predominating.
Pretty things in silk isles is
new idea in spring hosiery. They
have quite silken appearance
and appear in host of beautiful
Colorings Ask to see them and
you simply cannot resist the
temptation to buy pair. Go to
the Wonder for your soX: the
price is right; pair 25 to $1.00.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-04-02
Mems Furnishing Section

Each day brings us some pref
ty novelty. some new design or
Coloring for mans dress. Never
before have the designers
brought to light so many beau
tiful creations, so much ele-
gance of style and so much char
acter in construction as they
have this season for the gentle
mems attire.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1907-04-02
Fine NeCkWear

Nothing adds to the dress SO
much as the cravat--the correct
cravat. Correct in shape, in
style, in color and in tune with
the shirt colors; four-in-hands
more popular than ever; lots of
new plaids, checks and striped
effects and they come in myri-
ad of cOlors. Go to the Wonder
for your neckwear; priced csc
to 81 90 each.
Go to the Wonder for your
new waiscoat. belts, handker-
chiefs. collars. cuffs, garters,
suspenders. and other little
things that complete the whole.
We will guarantee you the kind
est, most courteous treatment
and absolute satisfaction for
every purchase.