The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1907-12-08


else. but the tired hostess counts her
cards when II is all over with an exultant
feeling at their number and the names
they bear.
Calls made and day at home estab-
lished. the next number on the social
/ programme is to entertain. Now, a per
son who entertains we'll and discrimi-
natingly is acceptable anywhere-London,
! Paris. Berlin. Rome. Petersburg-an well
come the social hostess OF unlimited
wealth. and Washington is, perhaps.
/ keener after such an one than any of the
capitals named But the entertaining
must be OF a superior order, not a half
hearted effort with obvious attempts at
economy.
/ The functions should be smart. the
lists OF guests carefully selected and
while there should be no vulgar display
of wealth. 1t behooves the hostess to see
/ that nothing is lacking which wealth can
| buy that will add variety and flavor 10
her entertaining Her dinners should be
| simple but elegant. the viands delicious
and rare the wines OF old vintage and
/ delicate bouquet, but there should be no
ostentation In the floral decorations and
the giving of dinner favors cannot be too
! heartily condemned. No dinner is per-
feet unless the guests are congenial. and
| to this important point the accomplished
| hostess devOtes her best energies These
/ simple rules should govern all entertain
ments where the guests are seated at
table. For ball or evening reception the
| order is quite different The keynote for
such affairs should be gayety and moth
| Ing should be left undone that might con-
/ tribute 10 their brilliancy.
| The hostess Shof1ld invite o,-orx- ono on
her visiting list. since for large occasions
ore cannot pick and choose among her
several hundred friends and acuuaint-
aHces. besides invitations TO balls and re-
ceptions cancel social debts OF which
every hostess has an abundance. The
house. should be brilliantly lighted. kept
decently COOL and as profusely deco
rated as good taste dictates and the
means of the hostess allows, but again
there should be no ostentation. At a ball
given in Washington a year or two ago.
where the flowers alone were said to cost
$4,000. one OF the guests, chatting 10
! friend IT. corner of the ballroom. said:
DO You think Mrs. Gold Mine would
take il much amiss If / should ask her
TO cut her bill for flowers in half the
1 next time she gives a ball and give me
/ the remainder 10 found a scholarship at
my alma mater2"
! II is, truly. a mistake for the budding
/ hostess 10 imagine that her boundless
wealth and unthinking expenditure OF the
same covers all social shortcomings. on
/ the contrary. loud Ostentation attracts
notice and calls attention 10 little things
+ that might otherwise escape observation
/ IL is i'm the worst possible taste 10 spend
hundreds OF thousands of dollars year
on entertaining and 10 ignore the local
/ "A 81 fnf d. al.
institutions established for the succor or
/ Improvement of humanity. But 20 return
/ to the ball, the supper should be abundant
and the menu can be made to cover a
/ broad range. Nothing comes amiss at
/ two in the morning when one IS tired
with dancing and half starved from
/ fasting. At a reception. unless II is very
pretentious. the bill Of fare is simpler and
/ az some houses where a reception is Of
/ weekly or monthly occurrence. only salads
sandwiches ices. and u punch are served.
/ The socially ambitious should have one
rule constantly in mind. never to accept
a hospitality they cannot return Il Is
not necessary that the return should be
| or the same character as the hospitality
accepted: many and various are the ways
| In which appreciation can be shown
1 What Dame Society insists upon IS that
her hospitality shall be recognized and
! respected. She has no time for or pa
thence with the surly individual, no matter
how rich or powerful he may be. who
sulks in corner and allows himself 10
be entertained. She wants a duid pro
quo. and while she does not insist that
dinner shall be given for dinner. ball for
ball, but in return for what she gives
she demands to be entertained in turn.
II is only Doors who accept everything
and give nothing Men and women of
the world invariably make proper return
Tor value received. and II they are not
Of the world but have decent intelligence
and good hearts they recognize the OBJ
legations the acceptance of social favors
entails
The greatest men have. almost without
exception. shone in society. and have
generally been more than willing to ex-
hibit their brilliant qualities in fashion
able drawing rooms Mrs Semple. the
daughter OF President Tyler who for a
time acted as chatelaine OF the White
House and who is still living here al the
Louise Home. is authority for the state
ment that Daniel Webster was the social
star OF the day.
Whenever he entered drawing-room. -
she says. ''all eyes were turned upon him:
when he spoke all ears listened. and IN
I'll he left the room he was the center Of
attraction. No matter how radically one
might differ from him IN politics no mat
ter how determined one was not 10 be
fascinated by his gigantic intellect. he
! had in the end 20 succumb 10 a subtle
and nexplicable charm" Mr. Blaine was
also a social lion and his repartee at din
ner was as brilliant and finished as II
was in the Senate chamber. Hundreds
OF other equally famous names could be
! mentioned in this connection for clever
people in all ages have realized that IL
one expects and accepts the best he must
give the best Of himself his talents his
personality, and that he must draw gen.
erously upon his bank account, II he has
one, TO REPAY his social debts.
In a mixed society like that OF Wash
ngton the newcomer often makes unde-
sirable acquaintance, than which there
is no more deplOrable mistake; for un-
desirable friends stick TO one as barna-
cles stick 20 the bottom Of a ship: indeed
they cannat be so easily gotten rid of as
/ these tenacious crustaceans unless one is
willing 10 commit a voluntary rudeness
and cut them; but that is the most
/ shameful social sin that can be COM
mitted and would be impossible to either
n gentleman or a lady. hence care should
De taken 10 De quite reserved on meet
Ing strangers and deliberate and careful
/ in forming friendships. Unfortunately
money goes a great way toward settling
the social status and many an adventurer
has been admitted to the inner circles
/ by a display Of wealth.
Some Of the following correspondence
has been on The Arbiter's desk since
early In the summer. when vacation be-
gun, which is the excuse for the delay
in answering them. The majority OF the