Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-12-27

did you have a fine auto trlp7's
Every much so-all fiaes"-Baltimore
American.
Edgar Is splendid talker. isn't
he2" Zone of the finest ever escaped
from. Life.
How many people work In your Of
fce2" Work? Perhaps two thirds of
them. "-Fliegende Batter.
Stella-So she divorced him for de-
sertlon? Bella--Yes. he positively re-
! fused 10 live In the auto.-Evenng
Sun.
II haven't pull with any one" said
the unsuccessful man. "Oh, yes, you
have, dear" said his wife, encouraging
ly, with the fool-killer. Life
Senator A--And do most of your con-
stituents think as you do on this ques-
/ lion? Senator X-Well, most of them
think as they think l do.--Somervllle
| Journal.
I'm few years" said the inventor.
we will be travelling by airship." II
hope So" answered thu automobillst.
1T Will be Joke on the country sher-
| IFS. Washington Post
Tommy Figg Sisters beau kicked
| my dog yesterday. but / got even with
him, You bet. Johnny Briggs Howl
Tommy Figgi mixed qulnine with
her face powder. indianapolis Jour
nal
do you really like me. Charley 2"
Sure, Don't come to see you regu-
| larly?" "But men often call on a girl
for whom they care little or nothing"
Not with Christmas looming up
Houston Post
1 Never marry a man to reform him,
dear" Il won't, auntic And I'll prom
Use you another thing" what is that,
my child?" "l'll never reform man
for some other girl to marry" st. Paul
Pioneer Press. ;.
Gladys Papa will be 50 pleased to
know that you are poet Algernon--
All Then, like you. he adores poetry.
/ Gladys No, not that. but the last one
OF my lovers he tried to lick was foot
ball player.--Life.
81 know something you don't know"
said the facetious youth 10 the tair
dehutante. What's that9" inquired
the maiden. Your waist Is unbutton-
cd down the back" replied the youth
Detroit Free Press.
please, num-" began the aged hero
In appealing tones, as he stood at the
kitchen door on washday, 1--WE lost my
leg" well, I amt got It., snap
ped the woman, slamming the door.
Everybodys Magazine.
Il wish you would mention this to
links 1t Is highly important" IN
mention Il to him to-day" but how
do ven know yon viii see him today"
Pm bound to bump into him. | owe
him money. ST Paul Pioneer Press.
Policeman (holdIng down tramp on
sidewalk No damage ma'am; he's
merely having n At Kind Lady-Gra-
clous! Shall / get some water and
throw II In his face? Policeman--Do
you want to kill him p Seattle Post-ln-
teiligencer.
"Ah," said the press humorist, 81 see
you have cut out one of my jokes" "Ila,
ham "Found II funny, did your "Exs
cuse me for laughing. old man. What
cut out was an adj on the other side
Of the page. New Orleans Times
Democrat
Are you going to settle anything on
your daughter?'i asked the young man
with the cigarette and languid air.
"Well, 1t rather looks II she marries
you that she is going TO settle some
thing on me-" replied the parent
Yonkers Statesman
II understand that he has long been
student OF political economy" said the
visitor. "He has" said Senator Glu-
cose, "and his economy In politics has
kept him out of Office. He thinks he
can be elected without spending cent"
Town and Country.
Jack (encountering an old friend -
i Hello, JIM Fancy you volunteering
Jlm--Well. you see. I've no wife and
family and | love war. But what
brings you out heref Jack-Thats Just
the point. I've got a wife and family
and / love peace.-R Regiment
You don't really mean to say yoE
wouldn't like to get outT demanded
the prison visitor. why, I thought
you were In for life" "Oh, worse than
that, maagn," replied the convict I'm
in for double life. I've got two wives
waiting outside Philadelphia Press
The toller in the city had been given
an advance In salary. Now" he said,
iubilantiy, II can begin saving to buy
farm" Out In Washington the agri-
culturist looked at the check received
for his seasons wheat. Another such
crop or two and / can move into the
city" he unused. Philadelphia Ledger.
The manager Of an office had adyer-
tised for an office boy. In consequence