davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17
Kill One Every 10 Hours.

Every 10 hours a life is lost in
New York under the wheels of a
passenger car-surface, elevated or
steam This fact has been brought
out by Secretary Travis II. Whitney,
Of the PEAlic Service Commission, In
a table giving a record he has kept OF
transportation accidents from Au-
gust to September 1.
In these 26 days 145 persons were
hurt in car collisions and 465 In
collisions between cars and vehicles.
Once in each hour and % minutes
of the period some person was struck
by a car. making total of 405>
Sixty-four persons were injured In
boarding cars and 1893 were in
jured in alighting from them, which
goes to show that at least that num-
Der of New Workers have not yet
leraned to face forward when getting
of street cars.
Employees to the number of Sal
hurt, 33 persons were hurt in derail-
ments, &c prospective passengers feb
downstairs and 1881 persons were
hurt in unclassifed ways. A total
of $500 were either killed or injur-
ed in &c days.
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17

Is It q catarrh Remedy, or a
Tonic, or IS Il Both?

some people cali Peruna a great
tonic Others reEer to Peruna as a
greet oatarrh remedy.
Which OF these people are right
1s1t more proper to cali Peruna q ca
sarrh remedy than to call it tonic2
Our reply is, that Peruna Ia both a
tonic and q catarTh remedy. Indeed,
there can be no effectual catarrh rem.
eay that is not also tonic.
In order to thoroughly relieve any
case OF catarrL, remedy must not
only have specific action on the mu-
cons membranes affected by the ca
tarxh, but it must have general tonic
action on the nervous system.
Catarrh, even in persons who are
otherwise strong, Is weakened con-
difton Of some mucous membrane.
There must be something to strength
On the circulation, to give tone to the
arteries, and to raise the vital forcea
Perhaps no vegetable remedy in the
world has attracted so much attention
from medical writers as HYDRASTIS
CANADENSIS. The wonderful Elf
oacy Of this herb has been recognized
many years and is growing in its hold
upon the medical profession. When
Joined with CUBEBS and COPAIBA a
tho Of medical agents is formed in Pc
runs which constitutes a specific rem
cay for catarrh that In the present
state of medical progress cannot be
improved upon. This action. rein
forced by such renowned tonics "a
CO1LLNS0NIA CANADENSIS, COR
xDALIS F0RM0SA and CEDRON
skkD, ought to make this compound
an ideal remedy for catarrh in all It's
stages and locations in the body.
From theoretical standpoint, there
xore, Peruna is beyond criticism. The
Csc OF Peruna, confirms this opinion.
humberless testimonials from every
quarter Of the earth furnish ample
evidence that this judgment is not
over enthusiastic. When practical ex-
perience confirms well-grounded the
Org the result is truth that cannot be
shaken.
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17

doudenum, or lower stomach and IN
testines. whore, In a healthy indi-
vidual, the transformation OF the
starch into a form of sugar is CON-
pleted and then the food absorbed by
the blood
But ii the powers OF digestion are
weakened, part OF the starchy food
VIII lie IN the warmth and moisture
of the body and decay, generating
gases and Irritating the mucous sur
faces until under such conditions the
whole lower part OF the alimentary
canal, including the colon and The
appendix, becomes involved Disease
sets up and at times takes the form
known as appendicitis.
When the symptoms OF the trouble
make their appearance. would 1t not
be good, practical. common sense, to
discontinue the starchy food which IL
causing the trouble and take a food
in which the starch has been trans
formed into form OF sugar in the
process OF manufacture?
This is identically the Same form
OF sugar found in the human body
after starch has been perfectly d.
gested
Now, human food is made up very
largely of starch and is required by
the body for energy and warmth.
Naturally, therefore, It's use should
be continued, IL possible, and for the
reasons given above it Is made posi-
Bile in the manufacture OF Grape-
Nuts
In connection with this change of
food to bring relief from physical
disturbances, we have suggested
washing out the intestines to get rid
of the immediate cause OF the dis
turbance.
Naturally, there are cases where
the disease has lain dormant and the
abuse continued too long, until ap-
parently only the knife will avail.
But 1t is a well-established fact.
among the best physicians who are
acquainted with the details above re-
cited, that preventative measures are
far and away the best.
Are we to be condemned for suE-
costing a way to prevent disease BY
following natural methods and for,
perfecting a food that contains no
medicine" and produces no medic,
inal effects" but which has 81 - nc
orally thousands OF persons from
sickness to health? We have rceiyszl
during the years past upwards 81 asa
600 letters from people who havs
been either helped or made entirely
we'll by following our suggestions.
and they are simple:
If coffee disagrcee and causes any
OF the ailments common to some,
coffee users quit 1t and take On
| Postum.
II white bread. potatoes. rice and
other starch foods make trouble, QuIt'
md use Grape-Nnts food which 81
iargek predigested and will digest.
nouEsh and strengthen. WHOM oihSr,
fornH of food do not. IT'S Just psAin
old mmon sense
Fe's Reason. FOR Pc,5.un>& No
4 NTILL Nofr 1859. = ~.
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17
An Irish HemorrhaQe.

In Toledo, Ohio, recently an Irish
man was hard at work painting the
top of a telephone pole a bright
green, when suddenly the pot of
paint slipped and splashed on the
sidewalk.
Not more than a few seconds later
enother Irishman. also an employee of
the telephone company, came along.
He looked at the paint. then at his
countryman on the ladder coming
down the pole. Then, with affected
anxiety, he called.
"Mulcahy, Mulcahy: How We had
a himorrhage?''
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17
BABY WASTED TO SKELETON.
In Torments With Terrible Sores on ,
Face and Body-Tore at Flesh
Cured by Cutfcura

My little son, when about year and
half old, began to have sores come out
on his face. They began to come on his
arms, then on other parts of his body. and
then one came on his chest, worse than
the others. Still he grew worse. At the
end of about a year and half of suffering
he grew so bad had to tie his hands *
cloths at night to keep him from scratch
ing the sores and tearing the flesh. He got
to be mere skeleton and was hardly able
to walk. l sent to the drug store and got
a cake OF Cuticura Soap and box of CuH-.
cura Ointment, and at the end of about
two months the sores were all we'll. He
has never had any sores of any kind since,
and / can sincerely say that only for
the Cuticura Remedies my precious child
would have died from those terrible sores.
/ used only one cake of Soap and about
three boxes of Ointment Mrs. Egbert
Sheldon, R. F. D., Mol, Woodville. Conn,
April %. 1s05''
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17
Transmitting The Bible.

1t will astonish many persons to
know that the Bible Is now trans
lated and read in 400 different
tongues. w. G. Fitzgerald relates in
the October Harper's Magazine how
this vast undertaking has been ac-
complished. 1t has cost many lives
and millions of dollars. In addition
to the first cost Of translating, there
is the expense of revising. The last
revise of the Madagascar Bible cost
SIS, 900, and $4,000 was paid to
DR.. William Carey and his staff for
the Serampore version Of the Bible
in Hindustani.
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17
Beware OF Ointments For Catarrh
Tint Contain Rferrrar-v

as mercury will surely destroy the sense Of
smell and completely dernnge the whole sys-
surfaces. Such articles should never Be used
except on prescriptions from reputable ply
sicians, asthe damage they win do is ten fold
to the good you can possibly derive from
them. Halls Catarrh Cure. manufactured
Dy +; s a. w1sn oEd 20, Ioisao; "a contains
directly upon the blood and mucous svrtscss
of thesystem. In buying Halls CatarTh Cure
be sure you get the genuine. 1t Is taken In
ternally and made In Toledo, Ohio, BY II.
j. Cheney 4 Co. Testimonials free.
Sold by Druggists; price, 75c. per bottle.
Take Halls Family Pills for constipation.
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17
ssBOO-H1O
Shouts a Spanked Baby.

more ridiculous than any comment of
ours could make It.
Does Golfers expect to regain any
self-infiicted loss of prestige by dem
onstrating thru suits for damages.
that 1t can be more artful In evadlng
liability for libels than the humble
bat resentful victims Of it's defama-
tion, or does 1t hope by starting a
campaign Of libel suits to silence the
popular indignation. reproach and re
sentiment which 1t has aroused.
Golfers can not dodge this public
controversy by private law suits. 1t
can not postpone the public judg-
ment against 1t. That great jury, the
Public, will hardly blame us for not
waiting until we get a petit jury in
a court room, before denouncing this
prodigal detractor of institutions
founded and fostered either by indi-
viduals or by the public, itself.
No announcements during our en-
tire business career were ever made
claiming medicinal effects" for either
Postum or Grape-Nuts. Medicinal
effects are results obtained from the
use Of medicines.
Thousands of visitors go thru our
entire works each month and see for
themselves that Grape-N Nuts contains
absolutely nothing but wheat, barley
and little salt; Postum absolutely
nothing but wheat and about ten
percent of New Orleans molasses.
The art Of preparing these simple ele-
ments in a scientific manner to OBJ
tain the best food value and favour,
required some work and experience to
acquire.
Now, when any publication goes
far enough out of its way to attack
us because our advertising is med
ical." 1t simply offers a remarkable
exhibition of ignorance, or worse.
We do not claim physiological or
bodily results Of favorable character
following the adoption of our sug-
gestions regarding the discontinuance
Of coffee and foods which may not be
keeping the individual In good health.
We have no advice to offer the per-
fectly healthful person. His or her
health is evidence in itself that the
beverages and foods used exactly fit
that person. Therefore, why change?
But to the man or woman who is
ailing, we have something to say rs
result OF An unusually wide expert
ence in food and the result OF proper
feeding
In the palpably ignorant attack on
us in Golfers, appeared this state
ment,-"One widely circulated para
graph labUrs to induce the impression
that Grape-Nuts VIII obviate the ne
cessity OF an operation in appendI-
citis. This Is lying and potentially
deadly lying"
In reply to this exhibition Oh
well let the reader name it, the Pos
tum Co.. says:
Let 1t be understood that appendi-
citis results from long continued dis
turbance IN the intestines, caused pri-
mariIy by undigested starchy food
such as Vhite bread, potatoes, rice
partly cooked cereals and such.
-. y = :. -. - -.
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17

Or. Osler's theory that all men
reach the height of their power at
forty years received a severe setback
Yesterday when Rabbi Barnett VOL
nisky danced with the agility of a
boy in celebration OF his great-grand-
daughters marriage and his 10th
birthday
In reality the rabbi was 10 years
oldCeM July 81, but he postponed the
celebratioh OF his birthday until yes
terday, when his great-granddaught-
err. MisstEtta wolinsky, was married
to Burnett Gree1berg at his home.
SO Forsyth Street. In the presence
of children. grandchildren and great
grandchildren, Rabbit Wolinsky dane
ed famous Russian dance in cele-
: bration of the double event.
Rabbi Wolinsky was as free and
easy In his motion as If he had not
passed the century mark by ten
years, and after he had danced for
twenty minutes, he displayed not the
slightest sign OF fatigue. N. Y.
Herald.
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17
On Color Addition

When you hear sounds and see
colors they call it color addition, >"
commented an interminable bore, be-
ginning a narration.
Stop one minute" said a vulgar
ian, with no app eciation or soul for
large words, who was standing by,
they call it what. you say?"
Color audition," said the man,
lit means simply that you think you
see color whenever you hear a GER
tain sound. When you hear a COM
bination of sounds you see a com
bination of colors"
Then If would seen a blue sound
and a yellow sound at the same
time" said the vulgarian, Il would
see a green sound wouldn't II"
No" returned the bore becoming
impatient, You would see only the
two colors, though the subimpression
of the two might be green, just as
in a 'pointilliste' painting your eyes
primal hues though the subimpres-
sion may be combined color"
''All right" said the vulgarian.
well, wonder if you can depend
upon color auditor over the phone.
The other day l heard woman's
voice. its tones were velvety brown
to me.
Judging from her voice 1 should
say that that woman was a soft, fluff
fy little thing with long eyelashes
clear, dark skin, and brown hair;
said to a friend.
You're wrong, said he, That's
Bess McGuinn, and she is nothing of
what you say. She is decided
blond
But the funny part of it all was
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17

A Doctor OF Divinity, now Editor OF
a well-known Religious paper, has
written regarding the controversy be-
tween Golfers Weekly and the Re-
ligious Press of the Country and 9TH
ers, including ourselves. Also re-
garding suits for libel brought by
Golfers against US for commenting
upon its methods.
These are his sentiments, with
some very emphatic words left out.
THE religious Press owes you a
debt OF gratitude for your courage in
showing up Golfers Weekly as the
"Yell-Oh Man" Would you care to
use the Enclosed article on the boo
Hoo Baby" as the "Yell-Oh Mans"
successor"
-" A contemporary remarks that Col
ller's has finally run against a solid
hickory Post" and been damaged in
its own estimation to the tune of
100000"
Here is a publication which has,
in utmost disregard OF the facts,
spread broadcast damaging state
ments about the Religious Press and
others and has suffered those false
statements to go uncontradicted, IN
til, not satisfied after finding the Re-
ligious Press too quiet, and peaceful,
to resent the insults, 1t makes the
mistake of wandering into a fresh
field and butts its ratified head
against this Post and all the World
laughs. Even Christians smile, as
the Post suddenly turns and gives
it back a dose of its own medicine"
lit is q mistake to say all the
World laughs. No CHEEKY laugh
comes from Golfers, but 1t cries and
boo hoos like spanked baby and
wants $75O.OOO.Oo to soothe it's ten
der, lacerated feelings"
Thank Heaven It has at last
struck a man with "back bone"
enough to call spade spade" and
who believes in telling the whole
truth without fear or favor"
Perhaps Golfers with its utmost
disregard for the facts" may say no
such letter exists. Nevertheless it is
on file in our Office and is only one of
q mass of letters and other data,
newspaper comments, etc, denounc-
ing the yellow" methods Of Golfers.
This volume is so large that a man
could not well go thru 1t under half
a days steady work The letters
come from various parts of America.
Usually a private controversy is
not interesting to the public, but this
Is n public controversy.
Golfers has been using the "yeI-
low" methods to attract attention to
itself, but. jumping in the air, crack
ing heels together and yelling Look
at me" wouldn't suffice, so it started
out on "Hoiier Than Thou" attack
on the Religious Press and on medi-
cines.
We leave 1t to the public now, as
we aid when we first resented Col
lier's attacks. TO say whether, in a
craving for sensation. and circulation,
its attacks do pns Vlnt to sys-
tewatic me- There's unding. We
likewisor Aalxs>H<,vv :
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17
a Geyscr Clock.

One of the most curious clocks
in the world is said to be that which
tells the time TO the Inhabitants of
a little American backwoods town.
The machinery, which is nothing but
a face, hands, and lever, is connect
ed with a geyser which shoots out
an immense column of hot water
every thirty-eight seconds. The spout
ing never varies TO the tenth of a
second. Every time the water spouts
mp IL strikes the lever and moves the
hands forward thirty-eight seconds.
American Home Monthly.
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17
ODDS AND ENDS.

Punctuation marks were first used
in 1890.
A mouse seldom lives longer than
three years.
The annual fish catch of England
is valued at $53,96O,0OO.
The factories Of Japan close on
the 1st and 15th( of each month.
Fifty thousand !dollars year are
spent on Regent Dark in London.
The mattresses Used in the German
ata9y are stuffed rom g.-Ssolls q
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17
Wanted An Order Too.

AT a tea" said a Washington.
woman, the late Julia Magruder
told us a story about a little girl
whom she once took out to luncheon.
AT the luncheon's end Miss Magruder
handed her waiter $40 bill, and
the man brought back on a plate
great mound of greenbacks and sill
YER. The little girl looked at the
huge mound of change longingly:
II you please. Miss Magruder,' she
said, I'll have plate OF that, too"
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17
A Natural Inference

Mr.. Roxton with morning paper)
Cad! Fastsett's auto was wreck
ed last night and the six occupants
were badly hurt.
Mrs. Roxton-Poor Mrs. Fastsett!
l wonder how she received the news.
Puck
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17
Live Stock.

Chicago. = Market steady; steers,
$5.25 100; cows, $S.3O@5; heif-
ers, $40 5.75; bulls. $2.6O@5;
calves. $3@S.5O; stockers and feed
ers, $2.4O@5.
heavy shippers. $6.75 @6.S5; light
butchers, $6.75@7; light mixed,
$3.50 q 6.75; choice light, $6.75@7;
packing, 1913 a SIS; pigs, $50
$40; bulk of sales, $6.30@6.35.
Sheep - Market steady; sheep.
$3.50 q 6.25; lambs, $5.57@7.4O:
yearlings. $4,000.
Kansas City. MO.-Cattle- Market
steady, to loo. lower: choice ex-
port and dressed beef steers, $1,000
700; fair to good. $4.9O@5.75;
Western steers, 1918 5.65; stock
ers and feeders. $4,000 $50: South
ern steers, $3.O0@435; Southern
cows, $2.15 3.15; native COWS,
$4,000 4.50; native heifers, $500
@4.75; bulls, $2.35 $50; calves,
$3.5O@7.O0.
Hogs-Top. $3.50; bulk of sales,
$3.50 % $50; heavy, 1925 $40;
packers, $1,000 $50; pigs and light,
1925 "a $50
Sheep = Market strong; lambs S.
$6.75 @7.40; ewes and yearlings.
5000 $50; w estern yearIings.
1928 q SIS; Western sheep, $4,000
800; stockers and feeders, $500
$40.
Pittsburg, Pa.-C attle-Choice.
Sc. a $50; prime, $5.SO@6.1O.
Sheep Prime wethers, $500
5.75; culls and common, $2@3;
lambs, SIS 7.50; veal calves, $50
$50.
Hogs - Prime heavies, $7.1O6
7.20; mediums, $73O@7.35; heavy
Workers, $500 1856; light Workers.
$6.S0@7.10 pigs, $50 $40.
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17

could not do homework, aud for
two years did not get out of the
house. The kidney secretions were
irregular, and doctors were not help
ing me. Doan's Kidney Pills brought
me quick relief. and finally cured me-
They saved my life"
Sold by all dealers. so cents a box.
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17

that my friend was wrong and / was
right, and that the girl who was talk
ing was not Bess McGuinn, but her
best chum, who was all that l have
said
Yes, that was funny" growled
the vulgarian enigmatically.
The saddest part of all this yarn
! is that it is all so. Work It out
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17
Wholesale Markets.

-Wheat-Sales or car
goes on grade at 100 &c. for special
bin No. 2 red; 100 for stock No.
red; log " for special bin steamer
No. red; 1O5 n for stock steamer
No. 2 red; 1041a for special bin re-
Jected, 1O3 II for stock rejected and
Il for rejected to go through
drier.
The market for Western opened
strong and 1c. higher: spot and Oc-
tober, los u c.; No. 2 red Western,
Ill; December, 1119s. Prices ruled
firm, but not much wheat changed
hands. Sales 5000 bu. December,
III c.; 10000 bu., do, III y; A.
600 No. 2 red Western spot, 11215;
car No. red Western spot, 112M
Corn-Western opened strong and
5c. higher; spot and October,
~ hc.; year, &c; January, 65 May,
IS "a. Demand was fair, but offer
ings were light.
Oats-White-No. 2, heavy. $50
69c.; No. 2, light to medium, Sc p a
81 " No. 8, heavy, 56@57; No. 8,
medium, 55 a Sc; No. 3, light, $50
% Y No. 4, light to heavy, ST. 40
81 n. Mixed-No. 2, 54@541kc.;
No. 3, $50 So "; No. 4, 5116 052.
Butter-Creamery separator, $40
o. mutation, "a OPS.
Cheese-Market steady. We quote
jobbing lots, per h., Ga 016hc.
Eggs-We quote, per dozen, loss
of; Maryland, Pennsylvania and near
by firsts, Csc; Western firsts. %:
West Virginia firsts, "a; Southern
hrsts, p q %; guinea eggs, 1908.
Live Poultry-We quote: Chick
ens-Old hens, heavy, per h.. 125sc;
do, small, per ID, 10; old BOOSTERS.
each, % a 30; young, per h., IA.
Ducks-Puddle, large, per h., 12;
do, small, II; Muscovy and mon
grel. per It., 11Q12.
New YorIS.-Wheat-No red.
112% C, elevator; No. 2 red. 1131A
!. o. b., afoat; No. l Northern Du-
ruth, 126 u, (. o. b., afloat; No.
hard winter, 116 q, f. o. b., anoat.
Corn-No. 2. 75c., elevator, and
"A y, to arrive, f. o. b., afoat; No
z white, rs, to arrive. No. 2 yellow.
rs ", f. o. b., afoat
Oats-Mixed, 26Q 80 lbs, SO 1kc.;
natural white. 26@32 lbs, 571k0
81; clipped white, 5000 lbs, 62 II
@7O.
Butter steady. unchanged; receipts,
5,S97 pkgs. Cheese strong; state, full
cream, small, colored and white, Sep
TENDER, fine, Is &c; do, good to
prime, $50 ".
Philadelphia. - Wheat firm, &c
higher; contract grade, October.
los II a 100. Corn firm, y c. higher;
October, 7015 a Tic. Oats firm. -
a 1c. higher; No. 2 white, natural,
SIC.
Butter firm, good demand; extra
Western creamery, 1hc.; extra
nearby prints, "a
Eggs firm, good demand; Pennsyl-
vania and other nearby firsts. free
cases, 25c. at mark; do, current re-
ceipts, in returnable cases, "a at
mark; Western choice, free cases, 25
at mark; Western fair to good, free
cases, 24c.
Live poultry quiet but steady;
fowls, II a 14c.; old BOOSTERS, 8;
spring chickens, 10 IA; ducks, IL
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17
Delays Are Dangerous.

Young Scads-I don't want to go
to college, dad.
Old Scads-T call have to, my
boy, because you can't afford to neg
iect 1t. ] had to give a college a
million last year in order to get my
degree. Puck.
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17
The Latest.

Rounder-Wedderly wasn't at the
stag party last night. was he?
BOunder-No; he was stormbound'
ROunder-Why, there wasn't any
storm last night.
Bounder-Oh, yes, there was. His
wife had a brainstorm.-Chicago
News.
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17
Risky ACrobats.

Kind Lady-What is your father,
little boy?
Tough Kid-He's a acrobat, num-,
Kind Lady-What kind of an ac-i
robat?
Tough Observation-Disclosures
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17

from kidney trou-
bles. My back panied
me terribly. Every
turn or move caused
s b rp, shooting
pains. My eyesight
was poor, dark spots
appeared before me,
and / had dizzy
spells. For ten years
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17
1t Would Seem So.

Speaking Of the seasons,
summer is the pride OF them ALL
Myer-How do You figure that
out?
Gyer-It goeth before a fall, you
kn0w.-Chicago News.
The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1907-10-17
A Naughty Baby.

Tommy--Ma, baby is naughty.
He cried because / wouldn't give him
any of my cake.
Mammals his own cake finished?
Tommy Yes. ma; and he cried
while was eating that. too.-Punch.