Los Angeles herald., 1907-11-03

| LH0 WlHuS are bWllL anu CHILLI WhOh eN~
first-come SHOWS of winter drift along
the windowsill; when the hunter finds
pneumonia waiting for him at the lake,
and the pies we get resemble those that
mother used to make.
| Everybody fond of mince pies
| Dances nimbly, feeling good;
Now and then old subscriber
! Comes UP with load of wood.
Winters coming, and the bad boys
| In the schoolroom sing and dance,
For the teacher cannot feaze them
When they wear their winter pants.
| November was the ninth month in the
old Roman calendar, and gets its name
from novem, meaning nine. The Der,
which we would spell burr, was added
| by Nimrod, the quail hunter. He had an
| Irish setter with which he hunted in No
vem. and the dog got SO many burrs on
! its tail that he called the month Novem-
ber. Like all burrs, this one stuck.
Novembers place in the calendar was
changed when Thanksgiving was invented.
The Romans debated this in the senate.
Some of the senator's thought November
should continue the ninth month in the
year. Turkeys, they pointed out, were
large enough to eat, and there was enough
to be thankful for by that time in the
year to go right ahead with the fireworks
and the escalloped oysters. Cicero had
been very silent all this time. When the
Senators who wanted to observe Thanks
giving three months before Christmas had
said all they had to say, he arose and
disposed of them forever by simply say
irg: But cranberries won't be ripe"
The hills are painted red and gold,
The frost is hoar and white.
The moon Is sailing white and cold
Across the skies Of night;
The Fish and Hartman dispute
VIII become mortal strife;
Instead OF proxy ballots.
They'll demand each others life.
So each will take OF strychnine
good and deadly lump,
And then they'll shake the dice to see
Which gets stomach pump.
The president has gone for game and
killed lady bear, the days are growing
short and soft and hazy is the air; the
country editors who once had money in
their tills are selling all their diamonds
row to pay their paper bills.
Sagittarius the Archer is the Zoadical
sign for November His name is from
the Latin word sagitta, meaning arrow,
and is typical of the sudden cold shoot
ing into the earth and causing the turnip
to run for the cellar like a whitehead.
From the 1st to the 22d Of the month the
sun will be in the constellation of Scorpio,
which is Mr.. Bryan's unlucky constella-
ton. and will make 1t difficult to tell
whether he is coming or going. From the
22d to the Both, the sun will be in the con-
stellation of Sagittarius. In which Mr..
Taft and the White House are at aphe-
hon. and he will look as If he would nm
ish about fifth.
On the 14th the sun will rise with the
transit of Mercury on its disk. For three
tours and thirty-six minutes the planet
will describe a snort chord on the north
ern limb of the sun, causing money TO
run to it's hole in Wall street. and Stand
ard Oil to tell everything
Mercury which will be an evening star
during the first two weeks of the month,
will tire Of lovers and buggy riders on
the 14th, and will be morning star for
the rest of the month. 1t will cast enough
light on keyholes for sports to find them
without using a funnel and will look with
cortempt into the chambers of mollycod-
dies and milksops.
The girl who sued a summer man
Where cool sea breezes course,
VIII keep on suing-in the courts
And capture her divorce:
The watered railroads Will contrive
To have few more wrecks,
And the press will print more lists Of names
With broken backs and necks.
The loving maid viii feed her beau on
good dyspepsia fudge, the farmer With
the smokehouse will touch off his hick'ry
smudge, the proclamation will come out,
and the hired man Will put the turkeys g
head upon the block and amputate his
foot.
The flower for this month will be the
chrysanthemum and the birthstone viii
be the topaz.
A red or pink chrysanthemum is the
symbol of love; a white one signifies
truth, and yellow one despair. When
you wear a yellow one 1T means that the
gas bill has come in.
If you were born In November, you Will
be thrifty ambitious, strong and earn
est If born in the latter half of the
month, you will be brave, kind, honest,
just, generous, quick Of temper. and have
keen sense of humor. But you can
never be president. This is great dis
appointment, but you can't have every
thirg.
The lucky days of the month will be the
5th, 11th, 18th, 22d and 25th. Any of these
is good day upon which to begin trial
marriage. The unfucky days will be the
9Th, 18th, goth, Goth and 30th. Cover the
chimney up on all of these days or the
stork may bring you pair of twins. The
Gay to buy mining stock will be the 31st.