The Washington herald., 1907-03-24

! w nat cElSds Aeatif NiDPh'HA --+@
reins. After two such unfortunate at
tempts!"
Kitty nodded
IT'S always after the most unfortunate
attempts" she announced TRANQUILITY. that
they seen most anxious TO try it again
It's always the people who have been
most desperately restiye IN the bonds of
matrimony who can scarcely wait for the
divorce decree TO become absolute before
they are back at the altar seeking new
yoke"
And a new installment Of troubles" L
sighed, hicking my of horse thoughtfully-
They never appear to give up hope,
continued Kitty. that they can be happy
with somebody. The more miserable they
have been with number one. or number
two the reader they are to take a new
chance with number three The oftener
the fall. the oftener they try. The less
faith they have in the man or woman 70
whom they have been married, the more
faith they seem TO acquire in matrimony
itself"
"Oh. I don't know I objected, sereneiy.
I've seen II work the other way just as
frequently It's usually the man who was
most devoted TO his FIRST wife who is in
the greatest hurry TO replace her with the
second. It's the widower who sobs loud
est at the funeral and wears the deepest
mourning and goes around voWing never
TO marry again who Is the easiest mark
for the first pretty woman who makes
eyes al him. It's the widow who keeps
her husbands grave the gfeenest and his
picture in the parloT and bOres her friends
10 death talking about him who is the
quickest To exchange her weeds for a
wedding veil ana her sorrow for a sub
stantial income The more you miss a
person. the more apt you are TO replace
him. The better you have loved once.
the better able you seem 10 be 10 love
again. Exercise keeps the heart in good
working condition. Love doesn't come in
a bottle: it's Ike a spring or a well; the
more you draw on il. the more pientifuliy
and easily II flows"
"Ohr exclaimed Kitty. with a sudden
look 81 revelation, ITS just like gam
/ blingt'
"Love?" I Inquired. Or
"Mafrimony." corrected Kitty. ''If you
lose you want 20 try again, to see If
you can win; ana II you win. you want TO
win again"
And il you keep it up long enough"
added impressively, 'ft viii become q
mania"
"A what?" Kitty blew her blue chiffon
veil out Of her mouth and looked up al
me In alarm.
a habit-an obsession," I explained.
"The altar, like the card table. seems 10
hold a fatal fascination. Keep away from
s IL altogether and you are safe, but once
J let yourself be drawn into the game and
d you can't stop playing. The more you
lose the more reckless you become. and
the more you win the more interested you
become A man can remain a bachelor 10
his dying day; but he cannot remain a
widower. real or grass, for any length of
time no matter how desperately he
swears OF. once knew a man who
never married until he was forty; then
he won and lost six wives before he died.
/. It's Ike drinking or smoking. If the first
? glass or the first cigar agrees with you
b you take another; and If 1t disagrees with
/ you
J you try another brand. broke IN
r Kitty. gurgling. "Oh, well" she added
! bachelor or an old maid, and letting your
: heart grow stiT, or rusty. or labby. for
, want Of exercise
! I WINGED
I don't see" I retorted. that your
heart shows any symptoms Of becoming
rusty
7 like widowers.' broke in Kitty. look
, / ing up at me dehantly under her rose
bud toque. They know just how to keeT
of a woman's mental toes"
I They've had such good practice" I in.
: terpolated-
And they are so perfectly at case ano
skllfui at saying pretty things. anl
subtle and artistic at making love.
It's second nature TO them" ! de
lclared. They've praetieed ii all on-th,
other w0,lan."
Kitty jumped
7 wouldn't give much. she retorted
b with her nose in the air. "for an actor
who couldn't play his part well after Z
few years OF rehearsal"
nor l." I agreed promptly. It's the
same with widows I added. They
r know just how TO smooth your fur ths
r. right way and to coax you into good
f humor, and keep you purring with com
r. fort and"
, 4 suppose interrupted Kitty, thought
: fully, that's why a woman who Ia:
been married once always can marry
again without any trouble I've known
e girls who have spent years and years
e catching their first husband, and turned
70 around. in the first year OF their widow
. hood and caught the second without
o cTooking a finger"
Widows" I remarked. mildly, know
enough not to crook their fingers at Us
Besides" ] added. anything is more
), attractive on which some man has alread,
r set the seal Of his approval"
L And. no doubt" went On Kitty, ''afte1
l. one has gotten used TO depending on
4 man for her opinions and her fFOcks and
: to sitting opposite him at breakfast--''
: And to quarreling with him at night,
inteTiected
And TO having him round the house
: one does miss him dTeadfully, just as ont
! misses the family cat or the morning
: paper when it's not there"
And you can get so used 20 anything
I averred, "even trouble, or work or bad
cooking. that you will miss it when yol
no longer have 1t. Even man who ha.
= been nagged for a few years, or a woman
: WAC has been bossed or broWbeaten, misses
= the excitement after several months o
: monotonous calm and single bIessedness
: It's the very uneyenness and distractini
! uncertainty of matrimony that makes on
: feel so lost without il. Anything can be
! come a habit, even a husband or a wife
: or the family jars; and your morning
: scrap or your midnight curtain lectur
!, may become as necessary to your content
" ment as your morning cocktail to you
appetite or your toothbrush 10 your toilet
I once knew a man who lived in fla
near the elevated train. He got so use,
10 the rattle and rumble that when h
q moved into the country he pined ava,
r and they had TO bring him back TO tn
Il roar of the city again. Everything in If
4 Is a habit: and matrimony IS the stronges
n habit some Of us ever acquire. Sometime
! IL acts as a stimulant, like black coffe
n or cigarettes; and sometimes ii acts as
n sedative like opium or pipe; but which