The citizen. [volume] (Berea, Ky.) 1899-1958, 1907-12-26

doesn't question the hotel bill nor ask
the price of the wine, because he
doesn't intend TO pay II anyway. The
fellow who is prodigal with his VOWS
and promises and poetry is generally
the one to whom such things mean
nothing and. being Of no value. can
be flung about generously to every
girl he meets. The arm with the big
gest front office is likely to be the
one with the smallest deposit In the
safe. The man who swears of loud
est on New Years is usually the one
they have to carry home the morning
after And the chap who promises a
girl life of roses is the one who will
let her pick all the thorns eff for her
self"
Perhaps" sighed the widow. chew.
ing the stem OF a violet thoughtfully.
"the best way to cure a man OF a
taste for anything, after all. is 20 let
him have too much OF IL instead OF
making him swear on. II you want
him to hate the smell Of a pipe insist
on his smoking ali the time. X you
want him TO sign the temperance
pledge, serve him wine with every
course. II you want him 10 hate a
woman, invite her 10 meet him every
time he calls. and tell him how 'suita-
BILE she would be"
and II you want him TO love you"
finished the bachelor. don't ask him
20 swear II, but tell him that he really
ought not 10. The best way to man
age a donkey-human or otherwise
is to turn his head In the wrong di.
rection and he'll back in the right
one"
Then" said the widow decisively.
we ought 20 begin the New Year by
making some irresolutions."
Somewhat"
Vows that we won't stop doing the
things we ought not to do" explained
the widow.
IAN right" agreed the bachelor
thoughtfully. "I'n make an irresolu.
ton to go on making love TO you as
much as like"
You mean. as much as like. Mr..
Travers." corrected the widow Sc
verely.
How much do you like?" asked the
bachelor. leaning over to look into
the widows eyes.
The widow kicked the corner OF the
rug tentatively.
Il ike-all but the proposing" she
said slowly. you really ought TO
stop that"
I'm going 10 stop ito night"
The widow looked up In alarm.
"Oh. you don't have to commence
keeping your resolutions until to-
morrow morning." she said quickly.
And are you going TO stop refusing
me-to-night." continued the bachelor
firmly.
The widow studied the corner Of
the rug with great concern.
And" went on the bachelor. TAX
ing something from his pocket and
toying with Il thoughtfully. you are
going TO put on this ring"-he leaned
over. caught the widows hand and
slipped the glittering thing ON her
third finger. Nov" he began. you
are going to say that you will"
The widow sprang up suddenly.
"Oh. don't. don't. DON'T" she cried
In a moment We1l me making prom.
isesi"
We don't need to, said the bache
lor. leaning back nonchalantH, we
can begin by making-arrangemeDts.
Would you prefer TO I've In town OF
az Tuxedo? And do you think Europe
or Bermuda the best place for the"
bermuda. by all means" broke in
the widow, "and wish you'd have
that hideals poriico taken on your
town house. Billy. and" But the
rest OF her words we're smothered In
the bachelors coat lapel-and some
thing else.
Then you do mean to marry me,
after ALL" cried the bachelor tri'
umphantly.
The widow gasped for breath and
patted her hair anxiously.
IL meant to marry you all the
timel" she cried. hut / never thought
you were really in earnest and"
"Methinks." quoted the bachelor
happily. that neither OF us did pro
test too much. We haven't made any
promises. you know"
Not one" rejoined the widow
promptly. las 10 my flirting"
"Nor as TO my clubs"
Nor as TO my relatives"
Nor my cigars"
And we won't make any VOWS,
cried the widow. except MARRIAGE
VOWS
And New Years PROSECUTIONS.
added the bachelor.
Listen" cried the widow softly,
with her fingers on her lips.
A peal of a thousand silver bells
rang out on the midnight air.
THE chimesl" exclaimed the wild
ow. They're full OF promises"
Il thought Il sounded like a wed
ding bell" said the bachelor. disap
pointedly.
Maybe" said the widow, IT was
only Love-ringing of."--Los Angeles