davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
QUAKER REFLECTIONS.

From the Philadelphia Record.
The thing most talked over is the
telephone.
A beer advertisement shouldn't be
dry reading.
Many a girl has been won in a walk
on a moonlight night.
1t is true that time will tell, but It
Is equally true that we can tell time.
The dealer in oatmeal and cornmeaI
might advertise meals at all hours"
s No, Maude, dear; fellow is not a
tutor just because he blows his own
horn.
The ball player who always strikes
cut isn't considered an out-and-out
player.
The man who boasts OF his wicked
ness isn't any more to be believed than
he who pirates of his piety.
Blobbs-'That fellow looks like a
cut-throat." Slobbs-''Well you're
not far wrong. He's a BARRIERS APP
nrantice."
Wigg-"Your bachelor friend seems
to be rather fast young man" Wagg
-"Oh, no fellow is so fast that some
woman can't catch him.
Hoax-"Wha- would etiouette re-
quire If you should have q chance to
be presented to King Edward ?" Joax
Gee! 1 guess I'd back OUT
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

Eunice arrived at the schoolhouse in this
company of her father and mother. Al.
most Immediately she heard that Burt
Seymour had come alone with his horse
misunderstanding was being gossiped
about The schoolmaster was well known
to the Halidays, and a few whispered
words from Mrs. Halliday perfected hel
Seymour and Miss Eunice Halliday would
choose sides, and they found themselves
at once the center of interest. Each
sought to decline, but each was pushed
eighty, and then the spelling began. The
first five minutes did the business for
twenty.
In a quarter of an hour there were only
later Eunice and Burt alone were left.
They stood facing each other, though not
looking into each others eyes. Burt look
ed obstinate. and the girl had her chin in
of the decade. For twenty minutes the
teacher hunted out the hard words, but
could trap neither. Then Burt was caught
and went down, and the victory was
awarded the girl amid cheers. Five min
utes later the crowd broke up, and Eunice
was hunting for her wraps, when a hand
was laid on her arm and voice whis-
pered:
.., "E.uny,, how DC you spell Idiot for
THE simplest way" she replied as she
turned to Burt.
Then ride home with me. brought
my buggy on purpose.
'Of course 1t worked, said Mrs. Halliday
that night to herself after making a
cackling noise in her throat. If it had
been left to Eunice, now-but 1t wasn't.
When smart young man thinks ne
smarter than an old married woman. it's
time he was spelled down a few and take
back seat. 1907, by Mary
McKeon.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
JOURNAL ENTRIES

The chief end of man really depends
on whether he has more brains than
feet.
= X
People who fall in love at first sight
sometimes neglect to take a second look
until after it is too late.
= \
These whirlwind campaigns are the
ones that usually throw the dust in the
eyes of the people.
q 4
A Berlin scientist has discovered a
way to photograph breath in order to
identify disease. But would a breath
that has had its wrinkles eliminated
with few cloves look the same as one
without anything to disguise how many
drinks the owner had taken?
o.
An Altoona cobbler is creating COIL
siderable excitement just now because
he claims to be able to burn ashes. The
peach cobbler will have its inning later.
After the names were handed out in
the beginning, how did the Smiths and
the Joneses get such a start over the
rest Of the crowd?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
GLOBE SIGHTS.
(From the Atchison Globe0

(FrOm the AtchiSOn Globe)
There is one good thing about a dog:
a hypocrite. He does not make lot
of pretenses that he is better than he
really is.
After q woman reaches a certain
age, the pencil marks on the calendar
indicating when the hens are coming
Off" are mere important than the red
numbers which mark the holidays.
Somehow, at this season of the year.
when there is a circus coming, those
who have kin in the circus company
are not as ashamed of it as they were
In the revival system in the fall.
The Coolidge Enterprise says: 1--WE
know a married woman who is deter
mined to introduce Paris notions into
Kansas. But she can't do it. although
she apparently has the assistance of
her fool husband"
When the children of a widow mis-
behave. the neighbors say they need
"a fathers strong hand. but this is
about all a fathers strong hand"
amounts to: When the children are
bad. he grumbles to their mother,
why don't you make those children
behave?"
What has become of the old-fashioned
bad children which treated their par
ents so badly that the neighbors gossip
ed about it? We once knew a child
that worried it's parents to death, solely
for the lack of a little training in con-
nection with a number Of good whip
pings. You don't hear of such children
lately.
Some mothers won't let their children
eat candy, saying it gives them indiges-
ton after they become of age But not
every case of indigestion is due to eat
ing candy in youth; we have a touch of
1t, and we don't believe we ever heard
of candy until we were nearly grown.
The only CONNECTION we had in our youth
was home made sorghum.
Lysander John Appleton has been
married twice. When his first wife died
he was all broken up. but he resolved to
be brave and strong and conceal his
grief. The result was that his neigh
bors aid he didn't care. He has made
up his mind when the second Mrs.
Lysander John goes that he will scream
and kick, grovel in the dirt and tear
his hair, and make no effort to be self
controlled.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
REFLECTIONS OF a BACHELOR.
[From the New York Press.1

From the New York Press
You can forgive man nearly every
thing except being right in an argu-
ment with you.
A man feels sort of mad with his
wife If she is frivolous and scared OF
her IL she isn't.
Fasting doesn't seem to be so re-
ligious when you have to do it because
there is nothing to eat in the house.
One of the privileges of being rich
is not being afraid to carry an old cot
ton umbrella that bulges in the middle
like a sack of flour.
Somehow there is more fun in an
old pipe and a pair of slippers your
wife won't let you wear except when
she is away and don't know it than in
dreaming you are floating around in
heaven.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
GET BUSY,

If you have a task, my son,
Pitch right in and get 1t done.
We'll begun's half DONE" you know,
Says the maxim, and it's so;
Jump into your work with zest:
When you've finished stop and rest
Get busyi
Boy, be at your toll today;
All tomorrow you may play;
You'll enjoy recess the more
If your work you do before.
Only one way to get through:
Keep hard at 1t till you do
Get busxi
Boy, it's such a little span
From the far rear to the van
Dash ahead and win the stake:
You can do it; make the break.
Rest and holiday are where
Work is done. Strike out for there
Get busyI
Indiana 10lfs News
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
HUMoR OF THE DHY

DO you think you could identify
the BURGLAR" asked the chief of de-
tectives Il never saw him." replied
Gilman, but he was very small
man. How do you know ?" Haven't
I told you he got into our fat with
out any trouble. "-Philadelphia Press.
AT the Ball-Afiss withers-"You
are blushfng, Coyai What was that
clumsy partner of yours saying ?" Miss
Knisely-"Oh, nothing; only that be-
fore he met me life seemed like a
desert to him. Miss Withers-'"That
a dromedary. is it ?''-Town and Coun-
try.
Cholly-"wealIy, doncher know,
(interrupting) that out, Cholly
You shouldn't exaggerate' '--ChfcaRo
Daily News.
de man dat keeps buttin' in,D said
Uncle Eben, '-is jes' like my goat
Sometimes he goes right through de
obstruction, an sometimes he jes' gifts
Observation-Disclosures Star.
Finky-'My money is invested in
valuable land, but I can't get it out:
I'm land poor" Dink-'rWell. yoI're
better off than I am; my money is all
invested in poor 1and."-Detroit Free
Press.
Mrs. Ascum-'I see you're going in
for society. Has your daughter made
her debut yet?" Mrs. Nurftch-
What! Well, guess mott She got
all them things made to order in
Paris. ''-Philadelphia Press.
The Friend-If your married life Is
SO unhappy why don't you get a d.
vorce from your husband?
Unhappy Wife-Because he would
then marry some other woman and
make her unhappy.-Chicago News.
TT takes a great deal of intelligence
to amass a colossal fortune" yes"
answered Mr.. Dustin Stax, land a lot
more to know just what to do with It
when you've got it."-Washington
Star.
Wife-''Why, John, how dare you
swear before me?" Husband-"I beg
your pardon, my dear; I didn't know
you wanted to swear."-Chicago Daily
News.
when I was coming home last
night" said Miss Skeery, "I saw a man
skulking along in the shadow. Oh<
how 1 ram" AN couldn't you catch
him 2" inquired her little brother in
nocently.-Cleveland Leader.
How is it that big railroad official
did not attend your reception. as he
said he would?" REALLY a matter of
inadvertence on his part He got the
dates for the reception and one of the
indictments NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. Amer
lean.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

Kansas is lucky that it hasn't any
such political fight on the programme
as Ohio has. If the Taft-Foraker con-
test had to be fought out in this state
It might Interfere with the corn blowing
and a lot of good alfalfa might spoil in
the fields. There is such a thing as
TOO much politics
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

While the country is taking a great
deal of satisfaction in the fact that
President Roosevelt refused to appoint
Chauncey Depew as ambassador to
France, let it also shake hands with it
self because Jimmie Hazen Hyde was
not amounted either
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

''One would think" says the Chicago
News, that Hartman ought to be
bright enough to do a good job OF ~
ing low just now" We move to amend
by striking cut the word "low."
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

Nj. Hartman is said to be interested
in the National Arbitration and Peace
congress, which meets in New York
next week Perhaps he would like 10
have 1t arbitrate between him and
President Roosevelt and induce the
president to be peaceful.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

about the sure-thing games. such as
most gamblers run, in which the ele-
ment of chance does not enter. In
them it's always cinch that the other
fellow loses.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

cessfuI man is the aggressive one who
lays his hands on everything he wants.
After reading this the average man
will be In doubt whether, according to
this description, the successful man is
a highway robber or a trust magnate.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

Sinnmered down, Mr.. Harriman's
charge is that he bought President
Rooeevelr-or supposed he did-with a
$50 600 campaign contribution, but that
the president refused TO stay bought.
How much of the charge do you be-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
big orders.

In modern language, Mr.. Hartman
appears to be suffering from an aggra-
waited case of exaggerated ego. while
the presidents enemies Intimate that
he has a brain storm
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
A SUGGESTION.

If Wall street needs money to avert
a panic let them furnish the Kansas
farmers with cars to market their
wheat and other products and they
will turn around and lend 1t to the
New Yorkers.-KingmaE Leader.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

The constitution of Oklahoma con-
tains 100000 words. That is enough
TO ask six and two-thirds hypothetical
questions of the kind that Mr.. Delmas
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

This $5,00o,o 900 plot which President
Roosevelt exposes sounds plausible
enough, yet when the old-time Popu-
lists used to charge conspiracies on the
part of the Money Power we used to
laugh at the idea.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

It was reported that Texas had pro-
hibited gambling, but the law is a
snare and a delusion after all. 1t SIM
ply naakes-it a felony to lay wagers on
: game Of chance. Nothing Is said
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

Now that the Chicago election Is
over some of the Uncomfortable mill
lion dollar libel suits there can prob
ably be purchased cheap for cash.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

Chicago is to have a new postmaster
now, but he does not advertise any
bargain prices on postage stamps nor
ofrer to give a discount for cash nor on
L.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

Perhaps the reformed way OF spell
ing II Is. 'lire," but It means the same
when the president says it as If 1t were
spelled in the good old way.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

Mr.. Hartman tells how he came to
get into politics. Before the incident
is entirely closed and the lid nailed
down, he may be like many who have
gone before him and wish that he had
ravar cot IN
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

One thing Is noticeable: The Hearst
papers appear to be taking the Harri-
man side of the controversy against
Roosevelt, What's the answer?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

Since Pittsburg took the census the
other day and found only 2S good
men in that town, New York and Chi
cago are both afraid to make count.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

This Hartman episode makes the peo-
ple more determined than ever that
Roosevelt shall stay on the job awhile
1onQaP
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

The discovery of that 100000 plot
gives the president chance for 1T
tie exercise while congress is not In
aessior. ANYWAY.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

One of the things Senator Burton ov-
erlooked was that the president wasn't
after Bailey of Texas, and Bailey had
quite tirne.-Wlchita Eagle.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
THE PISTOL.

A pistol in a hip pocket is an en-
couragement to a quick temper. It is
a questionable adjunct for a wise man,
while a fool and pistol make COM
responsibility. A very large proper
ton of the men who carry guns" have
little or no excuse for it--Wilkesbarre
Leader.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

why doesn't Chancellor Day rush TO
the defense of Mr.. Hartman?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

"Siient" Smith. who died recently
left a fortune of $75.000,000- The
Smith family will now sit up and take
notice.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

Meanwhile the debate as to whether
Foraker or Taft owns Ohio goes merrily
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
GUESS WHAT 1T IS.
GOOD FOR CONCoRDIA.

II the raking and scraping this town
received during the past week should
De Kept up for about two weeks longer
this town would be the cleanest one in
northern Kansas.-Concordia Kensan.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

The State journal is a member OF Ine
Associated Press and receives the Iud il Gay LAY
felegraph report of that great news OF.
ganizafion for the exclusive AFTERNOON
publication in Topeka -. 49,
The news Is received in The state jour
nal building over wires for this sole pur-
pose.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

Every once in a while one Alton B
Parker hobs up to explain how /. nap
pened.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
WAIL STREET.-

As far as the rest Of the country is
concerned, Wall street is nothing more
than an ordinary bucket shop.-Los
Angles Times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
STANDINC ROOM ONLY

The Pitchfork makes hay while the
footlights characterization News and
Courier.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
AN ORsERVATIO,

It is the self-seekers who misuse po-
Ntfcal parties who do most to weaken
and destroy Decentralization News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
AN MUTATION.

No lamb" shorn in Wall street late
" need starve. There are jobs for all
of them in the spinning rooms of South
Carolina cotton mills.-Charleston News
and Courier.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
CRUELTY TO RAILWAY.

Somebody may soon organize The
Society for the Prevention Of Cruelty
to Railroads. Baltimore Sun.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
DREAMS.

The women speak of their Easter
bonnets as perfect Dreams A good
many of them are, too.-Baltimore Sun.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
HIJsTLING FOR THE HURRAHS.

political honors from the people of
Ohio without their hearty approval.
He will not sit down, however, and wait
for others to work up the approval
Chicago Record-Herald.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
DON'T TAKE THEM OFF.

Don't take them off. Don't shed them
row. Cling to them for a while longer.
We believe that we know just how you
feel, and that we can enter into your
feelings. But don't take them off at
present, whatever you do.-Chicago In
ter-Ocean.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
so NUMEROUS.

Bailey says his enemies can Ego to the
DEVIL" Does the senator want to crowd
hell?-Colorado Springs Gazette.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
IAN FRANCISCO.

Really, San Francisco's moral condi-
tions are worse than its physical-and
they are bad enough.-Los Angeles Her
aid.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
ANOTHER BORROWED POLICY.

A number of Democrats regard MT
Roosevelt's REPEATED declaration against
another term as one of the best ideas
he has borrowed from their party
Washington Star.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
KANSAS COMMEET
THE WAR ON ROosEvEIT.


Inc attack Of E H. Hartman is
significant merely because it is be-
Heved by astute politicians to be the
opening OF well-planned war upon
leads.
This war has not been hastily IN
dertaken. 1t has been contemplated
ever since the corporations began to
suspect that they could not handle
Roosevelt, and it has been decided
upon and secretly planned ever since
their suspicious were confirmed.
Roosevelt is a dangerous man-to the
vested interests, the powers that prey.
He stands for the people, and the pub
nc commence in him is mistaken. To
shake that confidence is the purpose of
men like Hartman who have set
about the task of his undoing.
The railroad newspapers are all
against Roosevelt, not openly but Sc
cretly. Study their policy, as it gleama
up from under their printed state
ments now and then. Every last one
of them has instructions, more or less
plainly stated to them, to throw ii
into" the president upon all occasions.
They are the chosen organs by which
the confidence of the people in Roose-
Welt is to be destroyed, and men like
Hartman, by moves like that which
he made this week, are to furnish
them with the means of doing 1t.
The method chosen is personal Wilt
fication. People are to be convinced
that Roosevelt is not a pure man per-
sonally, that he is untruthful high
tempered, head-strong. and altogether
untitled for a place of high trust. In
short, he is to be represented persis-
tentIy by innuendo as Burton badly
represents him as the champion hypo-
critic OF this age VIII the campaign
or viliihcatfon win? Well, hardly. The
result will be to make the people study
their leader even more closely, trans
forming blind worship into intelligent
admiration and confidence. Roose-
welt Will not be branded a hypocrite
for he is not one, and the people can't
be fooled.-Lawrence World.
GUESS WHAT IT IS.
"A deliberate and wilful untruth-
by rights it should be characterized
by an even shorter and more ugly
word" says President Roosevelt of the
statement by Hartman that the presi-
dent had asked the railroad man to
help raise campaign fund for him.
What word could the president posi-
bly, Observation-Disclosures News.
%
GOOD FOR CONCORDIA
If the raking and scraping this town
received during the past week should
be kept up for about two weeks longer
this town would be the cleanest one in
northern Kansas.@Concordia Kansan
A SUGGESTION
If Wall street needs money to avert
a panic let them furnish the Kansas
farmers With To
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

Hinky--"My money is invested in
valuable land, but I can't get IT ont:
I'm land poor" Dinl-''Well. you're
better off than I am: my money is ali
invested in poor 1and."-Detroit Free
Press.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
THE OVERCOAT

Spring appears to be here-but you
know what the american spring is.
Don't go far without your overcoat.-
Philadelphia Inquirer.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09
ERON OTHER PENS
COMFORT.

COMFORT.
Taximeter cabs registering distance
Travelled and legal fare are once more
promised TO the long suffering New
York public. When we get rid of the
'.all the traffic can stand" cabman and
the theater ticket Spectator we may
begin 10 think that the long deferred
era of sane city comforts is at last APP
proachfng.-New York Tribune.
MORE WORK FOR THE EAGLE.
1t begins to look as if the American
eagle would have to disguise itself once
wings for flight to Central America
Providence Journal.
To-
THE OyERCOAT
Spring appears to be here-but you
know what the American spring is.
Don't go far without your. overcoat.-
Philadelphia Inquirer.
%
DREAMS.
The women speak of their Easter
bonnets as perfect dreams A good
many of them are, too.-Baltimore Sun.
STANDING ROOM ONLY.
The Pitchfork makes hay while the
footlights Characterization News and
Courier.
CRUELTY TO RAILWAYS.
Somebody may soon organize The
Society for the Prevention Of Cruelty
to Railroads. ''-Baltimor Sun.
SAN FRANCISCO.
Really, San F'rancisco's moral condi-
tions are worse than its physical-and
they are bad enough.-Los Angeles Her
aid.
AN INVITATION.
No lamb" shorn in Wall street late
1y need starve. There are jobs for all
of them in the spinning rooms of South
Carolina cotton mills.-Charleston News
and Courier.
DON'T TAKE THEM OFF.
Don't take them off. Don't shed them
row. Cling to them for while longer.
We believe that we know just how you
feel, and that we can enter into your
feelings. But don't take them off at
present, whatever you do.-Chicago In
ter-Ocean.
ANOTHER BORROWED POLICY.
Roosevelt's REPEATED declaration against
another term as one of the best ideas
he has borrowed from their party
Washington Star.
HUsTLING FOR THE HURRAHS.
Foraker says he doesn't want any
political honors from the people of
Ohio without their hearty approval.
He will not sit down. however, and wait
for others to work up the approval
Chicago Record-Herald.
so NUMEROUS.
Bailey says his enemies can Ego to the
devil" Does the senator want to crowd
hell?-Colorado Springs Gazette.
THE PISTOL.
A pistol in a hip pocket is an en-
tpnn6T. [
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-04-09

de man dat keeps buttin' in" said
Uncle Eben, lis jes' like my goat.
Sometimes he goes right through de
obstruction, an sometimes he 1es' gifts
a headache '-Washington Star.