Los Angeles herald., 1907-03-05
SUPERVISORS ARE
READY TO PROBE
OFFICIALS WILL INVESTIGATE
THEMSELVES
Hope to Solve the Mystery of Who
Watered the MiIk-All Say They
Are Honest and Uns
ashamed

The Los Angeles county board of
supervisors has agreed to investigate
itself.
| Yesterday at the regular meeting of
the board the supervisors declared that
they were tired and disgusted with the
way in which the yellow brush of the
morning hysteria plant was being slung
! in their direction and they called in
District Attorney Fredericks and made
him promise that he would look them
over and see what he thought about
them.
The examination will be held Tues
day morning, March II, in the super
visors' room at the court house, since
that is the first day that Diogenes
Fredericks has day off,
On that day the supervisors will
either declare themselves guilty or not
guilty of having watered the milk that
has been turned over to the infantile
public as road oil.
On that morning Supervisor Pete Will
son will put an extra shine on his shoes
and an extra little smudge of hair tonic
on his spit curl and go to the court
house and investigate. If he finds him
self guilty Of having grated, then
everyone will say that he is an honest
man. If he finds himself innocent,
then everyone will say Pete Is graft
er, but Wilson doesn't care, for the
people Of his district are with him and
| have assured him support for the next
election.
Is Honest and Unashamed
Chairman Charles Patterson of the
board is honest, and he doesn't care
who knows it. If he met Diogenes right
out on Spring street he would grab the
startled old gent by his flowing gray
! ,s,I-.. A.II IL, Il
! business. Patterson Is also going to in
vestigate himself. He has determined
to go on the stand and tell all he knows
| about the road business and If he be-
| lieves his own testimony he will de-
clare himself not guilty If he doesn't
he may put Supervisor Alexander on
the stand to impeach him.
! Alexander doesn't mind. Like Caes-
ar's wife, he is above reproach and
! feels as pure as the best baking pow
! der.
Those three are the old timers on
the board. Supervisor Graham of Hol-
I lyWood, who used to be with the board
! and was known as one of the members
/ of the solid three, is shooting jackrab-
bits out near Toluca and investigating
/ himself out there, but it Is none of
anybody's business what his investiga-
tion shows. 1t has not yet been de-
! termined whether Patterson will be al
! lowed to examine Wilson and Wilson
Patterson, or whether Fredericks viii
examine them both. At any rate. they
are all of klnd-hearted dispositions and
will think Of each others families be-
fore they return a verdict against them
selves
Think how sad Pete Wilson'S custo-
mers at his grocery store would be II
Pete should find himself guilty of wa
tering the oil that has been put on the
county roads. Why, Pete Just mustn't
abuse himself that way or the first
thing he knew someone would be ex-
amining his groceries to see whether
the milk had water In 1t.
This Wouldn't Do
And Patterson, he couldn't do any
thing to himself or he might get mad
at himself and that wouldn't do at all.
Supposing he went home and told his
folks that after a close examination of
himself he had become convinced that
his testimony and Pete Wilson's was
not right and that he must find himself
guilty, why, his whole family would get
mad at him. and Patterson is a peace
able man.
And Alexander. Supposlng Alexander
went out In the byways and hedges and
I qQfH ha haa b