davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
Accounting 10 Come.

DR.. 8. Weir Mitchell, the celebrated
Philadelphia physician, was guest at
dinner of the National Board OF
Trade on one occasion. He listened to
one or two speeches and then slipped
out of the room. Later a friend in.
quired as to the cause Of his disap-
pearance. Il grew weary" he said,
"of hearing men talk about millions
and billions and not word about ed
ucation or moral progress or litera-
ture or poetry. Why, has the nation
got so imbued with comercialism that
men can talk of nothing but dollars
aud cents? Let me tell you, sir, that
this country could well afford to pay
81 900 100000 for another Shake
speare.' But, DOCTOR" said his
friend, banteringly, I'VE have our DR..
S. Weir Mitchell, and he did not cost
us 81 900, 600, 900" Wait" he answered,
and his eyes twinkled. Wait; you
have never got bill from me yet"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
MILLIONS APPROPRIATED
BY THE LATE CONGRESS
exceed those of the first by $41,2OS.,

exceed those of the first by $41,20S.-
95S.
During the last session 16,434 sal.
aries were increased at an annual
cost of $2,949,352. This includes the
vice president, speaker, nine cabinet
officers, 80 senators, 1876 representa-.
tives and "a employees of congress.
Contracts were authorized for pub
lie works requiring future appropria
tons aggregating SGT 4,349, of which
almost $16,000,O00 is for battleships,
torpedo boats, etc. The largest appro.
priation carried by any one measure
was $212,O91, 1893 by the postoflce
bill. The naval bill carried $9S,95S,'
507, the army bill $7S,634,5S2 and the
pension bill STAG, $4,000.
A comparison Of the total appropria'
tons made at the second session OF
the Fifty-ninth congress for 1908
1920, 798,144, with those Of the first
session of that congress for 1907
1919, $50 1855, shows an increase OF
SAL ,2OS, 959.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23

Eight brown hair was close-cut; hts
smooth shaven face was bright with
the freshness of youth. Here was a
sturdy young apostle without frills,
but with vigorous grip that left my
hand tingling. His voice was deep
and musical--a voice that suggested
sincerity and inspired confidence.
"Fm afraid / haven't been neigh.
borly, Mr.. Glenarm / was called
away from home a few days ago after
l heard of your arrival, and l have
just got back. blew in yesterday
with the snow storm"
He folded his arms easily and
looked at me with cheerful directness,
as though politely specializing as to
what manner of man | might be.
1T was a fine storm; / got a great
day, out of it." / said. "An Indiana
snow storm is something have never
experienced before"
This is my second winter. I came
out here because wished to do some
reading and thought I'd rather do it
alone in a university"
"Studious habits are rather forced
on one out here, should say. In my
own case my course of reading is all
cut out for me-"
"The Glenarm collection is famous
the best in the country, easily. Mr.
Glenarm, your grandfather was GER
tainly an enthusiast / met him sew
eral times, though he was trife hard
to meet!"-and the clergyman smiled.
my grandfather had his whims;
but he was a fine, generous-hearted
old gentleman" | said.
"You haven't been on our side of
the wall yet? Well, promise not to
modest your hidden treasure If you'll
be neighborly," and he laughed mer.
rily.
81 fear there's big joke involved in
the hidden treasure" replied. 'Tm
so busy staying at home to guard II
that have no time for social recrea'
ton"
He looked at me quickly to see
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
YO> ON|oC Ne
-: = I ::::: :; &
~ SD

and there is only one house within
that range.
Other reasons than the danger OF
explosions led to it's isolated location.
1t was necessary to remove 1t from
the danger of electrical and Earring In
fuences. In order further to do this,
the building is constructed on special.
ly insulated foundations, and with no
connection between its walls and
floor. The walls are anchored In deep
sand, and the floor of each room IL a
cement island set in lake of dry
sand.
This branch of Mr.. Carnegie's in.
stitution has already solved one prob
lem. 1t has made quartz glass Its
second problem is still unsolved;
namely, what is Portland cement, and
why?
The new laboratory, with its vol
cano machines, will begin to do bust
ness next month.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23

whether was joking. His eyes were
steady and earnest. The Reverend
Paul Stoddard impressed me more and
more agreeably. There was sugges
ton of quiet strength about him that
drew me to him.
II suppose every one about here
thinks of nothing but that I'm at Glen
arm to earn my inheritance. My resi-
dence here must look pretty sordid
from the outside"
"Mr. Glenarm's will Is a matter OF
record in the county, of course. But
you are too hard on yourself. It's no
body's business If your grandfather
wished to visit his whims on you.
should say, in my own case, that
don't consider it any Of my business
what you are here for. / didn't come
over to annoy you or to pry into your
affairs. l get lonely now and then
and thought I'd like to establish neigh
borly relations"
Thank you; appreciate your com
ing very much, and my heart warm
ed under the manifest kindness of the
man.
".And hope"-he spoke for the first
time with restraint hope nothing
will prevent your knowing Sister
Theresa and Miss Devereux. They
are interesting and charmingAthe
only women about here of your own
social status"
My liking for him abated slightly
He might be detective, represent
ing the alternative heir, for all knew
and possibly Sister Theresa was a
party to the conspiracy to drive me
away.
"ln time, no doubt, in time, I shall
know Them" / answered evasively.
"Oh, quite as you like!"-and he
changed the subject We talked OF
many things-of outdoor sports, with
which he showed great familiarity, OF
universities, of travel and adventure
Columbia was his alma mater, but he
had spent two years at Oxford.
CTO BE CONTINUED.)
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
CARNEGIE LABORATORY TO
BUILD VOLCANO FACTORY

r. HE most dangerous thing in Wash
i ington is the new geophysical
laboratory constructed with funds of
the Carnegie institution. 1t Is dedi-
Gated to making rocks, and for this
purpose 1t proposes to reproduce pent;
up volcanoes, and the frightful pres
sures and heat of the earths interior.
1t is the only building in the world
devoted exclusively to high pressures
and temperatures.
1--WE don't know just what we will
be able to do" said Prof. Arthur L..
Day. I'VE shall have to deal in very
high temperatures and pressures, and
it may end by our all being blown up.
But If we avoid that we hope to dis
cover some interesting things about
the crust of the earth"
The new geophysical laboratory
has been located at safe distance
from residential Washington. 1t Is
1000 feet from the nearest car line,
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
nDETE," the famous bull terrier OF

nDETE," the famous bull terrier OF
/ the White House, has at last
been vanuuished He met his Water
loo the other morning in the jaws Of
an unknown white bulldog, who made
a meal of Pete's front leg and Shout
der with a good bite out Of his ear
for a chaser.
The secretary of the interior will
resume his pathmaking across the
White House lawn, M. Jusserand will
cease practicing tree climbing, the
chief forester of the government has
dismissed his athletic trainer and
has announced he will now take his
morning sprints through Rock Creek
park, and a general look OF relief
is noticeable in the demeanor of every
member of the presidents official fam
lily az well as his kitchen cabinet.
Among the newspaper correspond
ents there is general rejoicing and
they swarmed over the White House
grounds to their hearts content all
day and long into the night.
But in the presidents household
there is mucn SOrrOW over IeIe us
tress. pete" was put under the ban
because he chewed up navy depart
ment clerk, and he was in disgrace
generally. Next this feeling gave
way to one of genuine sympathy for
Pete" who surely needs friends now
If he ever did.
pete" was allowed to take some ex.
ercise early. in the morning, after hay
ing been chained all night as pun.
ishment for his work on the navy de-
partment clerk. He evidently had a
crouch" against the world for being
tied up like a common, ordinary dog,
and he was In search of trouble, sure.
He raced around the White House
grounds for a time, looking for ex-
element, and 1t soon hove in sight
in the shape of husky fellow bull
terrier. pete" tackled him without
ceremony, but the other dog was too
quick for him. He made a grab for
"Petes" foreleg under the shoulder,
and got a magnificent under hold.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
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He started slightly. should not
have noticed 1t II | had not been so
keen for his answer.
mo, sir. / can't put my hand upon
them, sir"
That's all very well, Bates, but you
didn't answer my question. Do you
know where they are? I'll put my
hand on them if you will kindly tell
me where they're kept"
Il fear very much, Mr. Glenarm
that they have been destroyed. l tried
to find them before you came, to tell
you the whole truth, sir; but they
must have been put out of the way"
That's very interesting, Bates Will
you kindly tell me whom you suspect
of destroying them? The toast again,
please"
His hand shook as he passed the
plate.
Il hardly like to say, sir, when it's
only susoicion."
"Of course l shouldn't ask you to
incriminate yourself. but I'll have to
insist on my question. 1t may have
occurred to you, Bates, that in a sense
in sense, mind you-Im the mas
| ter here"
well, / should say, If you press me
that fear Mr.. Glenarm, your grand
father, burned the plans when he left
here the last time. l hope you will
pardon me, sir, for seeming to reflect
upon him."
Reflect upon the devil! What was
his idea, do you SUPPOSED"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
Washington Day by Day
News Gathered Here and There
at the National Capital
CAPTAIN HOBSON TO TRY
NEW POLITICAL SCHEME

III ASHINGTON. - Capt. Richmond
w Pearson Hobson, of Merrimac
fame, is going to play some practical
politics for a change. The former
naval officer and advance agent of a
billion-dollar navy is thought by many
to have become a rather astute poll
tician. His latest is the develop
ment of a scheme that promises to
make no end of trouble for the scien-
tific departments of the government.
The captain has borrowed from the
agricultural department an expert on
road building, one on soils, one on
cotton growing and one on forestry.
From the post Office department he
has obtained the loan of rural free
delivery expert
With this menago and accompanied
by his wife, the captain is going to
make a months tour of his Alabama
district. There will be a careful
booking of the aggregation and where
people wish its advice they will get
lectures and practical demonstrations
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23

In all the subjects the experts repre-
sent. Capt Hobson will do the hand
shaking and political solidification
act.
Alabama people happen to know
that Mrs. Ho.son is one of the best
women politicians in Washington.
She drove with him over every coun.
ty in the district. They got acquaint-
ed with everybody, explained their
desire to go TO congress, convinced
folks that they were justified In 1t,
and when primary day came bore off
tie nomination in triumph over Mr.,
Bankhead, who had held the seat for
20 years.
Other representatives are casting
envious eyes on this Hobson pro
gramme and are lightning to prepare
applications for .he use of govern
ment experts. II the departments al
low the enterprise to be generally
copied there Will be dearth OF ex
perts and the scientific departments
have to conscri9t them before long.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
CHAPTER x.-continued.

gathered up the fragments of Nor
kan's lantern and went back to the IL
brary. The lights in half the candle
sticks had sputtered out / extin-
guished the remainder and started to
my room.
Then. in the great dark hall, heard
muffied tread as of some one follow
Ing me-not on the broad staircase,
nor In any place could identify-yet
Enthusiastically on steps of some sort
beneath or above me. My nerves
were already keyed to a breaking
pitch, and the ghost-like tread in the
wall angered me. Morgan, or his ally,
Bates, undoubtedly, o reflected, at
some new trick. / ran into my room,
found heavy walking stick and set
off for Bates room on the third floor.
1t was always easy to attribute any
sort of mischief to the fellow, and
undoubtedly he was crawling through
the house somewhere on an errand
that BODIED no good TO me.
1t was now past two o'clock and he
should have been asleep and out of
the way long ago. | crept to his room
and threw open the door without, /
must say, the slightest idea of find
Ing him there. But Bates, the enigma,
Bates, the Incompatible cook, the ger
feet servant, sat at table, the light
OF several candles falling on a book
over which he was bent with that
maddening gravity he had never yet
in my presence thrown off.
He rose at once, stood at attention,
inclining his head slightly.
Eyes, Mr.. Glenarm."
Yes, the devil!" I roared at him,
astonished at finding him-sorry, ]
must say, that he was there! The
stick fell from my hands. I did not
doubt he knew perfectly well that /
had some purpose in breaking in upon
him. was baffled and in my rage
foundered for words to explain my.
self.
Il thought heard some one in the
house. l don't want you proving
about IN the night, do you hear?"
Certainly not, sir" he replied in a
grieved tone.
glanced at the book he had been
reading. 1t was a volume of Shakes.
peare's comedies, open at the first
scene Of the last act of Winters
Tale"
Quite pretty bit of work that, ]
should say" he remarked. at was
one of my late masters favorites."
Go to the DEVIL" bawled at him
and went down to my room and
slammed the door in rage and
chagrin.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
BULLDOG "PETE" AT LAST
MEETS HIS WATERLOO

Luckily the stranger got tired after
awhile and gave the White House ter
rier chance to adopt the discretion
airy part of valor, retiring in a mad
rush to safety under the White House
hedge. His superior knowledge of
the holes through the thicket stood
Pete" in good stead. and he got away
alive, thanks to the policeman on
guard at the White House, who cover
cred his retreat and chased away the
most admired dog in the capital.
If the owner of "Pete's" vanqulsher
will send word privately to lot OF
officials high in the government serv-
ice, he will receive the finest collar
and dog tag that money con buy.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23

II think, sir, if you will PARDON
Don't be so fussy!" / snapped.
Damn your pardon, and go on"
HE wanted you to study out the
place for yourself, sir. 1t was dear
to his heart, this house. He set his
heart upon having you enjoy it"
Il like the word-go ahead"
"And suppose there are things
about it that he wished you to learn
for yourself"
"You know them, of course, and are
watching me when Pm hot and cold,
watching me to see when I'm hot and
cold, like kids at child's game"
The fellow turned and faced me
across the table.
"Mr. Glenarm, as l hope God may
be merciful to me in the last judg-
ment, don't know any more about it
than you do"
"You were here with Mr.. Glenarm
all the time he was building the house,
but you never saw walls built that
weren't what they appeared to be, or
doors made that didn't lead any
where"
/ summoned all my irony and con-
tempt for this arraignment. He lifted
his hand as though making oath.
"As God sees me, that is all true.
was here to care for the dead masters
comfort and not to spy on him, sir"
"And Morgan, Your friend, what
about him?"
81 wish / knew, sir"
II wish to the devil you did," and
flung out of the room and into the Ii.
brary.
At IL o'clock I heard a pounding
at the great front door and Bates came
to announce a caller, who was now
stamping the snow from his shoes
audibly in the outer hall.
THE Reverend Paul Stoddard, sir"
The chaplain of st. Agatha's was a
big fellow, as l had remarked on the
occasion of his interview with Olivia
Gladys Armstrong by, the wall. His
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
CHAPTER XII.
! Receive a Call.

Going to bed at three o'clock on a
winter morning in a house whose
ways are disquieting, after a duel in
which you escaped whole only by
sheer good luck, does not fit one for
sleep. When finally drew the covets
over me it was to lie and speculate
upon the events of the night in con-
nection with the history of the few
weeks had spent at Glenarm. Larry
had suggested in New York that Pick
ering was playing some deep game,
and l, myself, could not accept Pick
ering's statement that my grandfath-
er's large fortune had proved to be
myth. If Pickering had not stolen or
dissipated it, where was it concealed?
Morgan was undoubtedly looking for
something of value or he would not
risk his life in the business; and 1t
was quite possible that he was en-
ployed by Pickering to search for hid
den property. This idea took strong
hold of me, the more readily, l fear,
since had alwaye been axious to see
evil in Pickering. There was, to be
sure, the unknown alternative heir,
but neither she nor Sister Theresa
was, imagined, person capable of
hiring an assassin to kill me.
On reflection l dismissed the idea
of appealing to the county authorities,
and | never regretted that resolution.
The seat of Wabana county was 20
miles away, the processes of law were
unfamiliar, and l wished to avoid pub.
licity. Morgan might, of course, have
been easily disposed of by an appeal
to the Anmandale constable, but now
that / suspected Pickering of treach-
cry the caretaker's Importance dwin.
died. I had wanted all my life for
chance at Arthur Pickering, and in
this affair I hoped to draw him into
the open and settle with him.
l slept presently but woke at my
usual hour, and after a tub felt ready
for another day. Bates served me,
as usual, breakfast that gave fair
aspect to the morning. l was alert
for any sign of perturbation in him;
but / had already decided that I
might as well look for emotion in
stone wall as in this placid, colorless
serving man. / had no reason to sus-
pect him of completely in the nights
affair, but l had no faith in him. and
merely waited until he should show
his hand.
By my plate next morning found
this note, written in a clear, bold,
woman's hand;
"The Sisters of ST. Agatha trust
that the intrusion upon his grounds
by Miss Armstrong, one of their stu
dents, has caused Mr.. Glenarm no an
noyance. The Sisters beg that this
infraction Of their discipline will be
overlooked, and they assure Mr.. Glen
arm that 1t will not recur."
An unnecessary apology! The note
paper was of the best quality At
the head of the page "St. Agatha's.
Annandale" was embossed in purple.
One Of the sisters had seen beyond
the wall undoubtedly wrote it-possi-
bly, Sister Theresa herself. A clever
woman. that! Thoroughly capable of
plucking money from guileless old
gentlemen! Poor Olivia! born for
freedom, but doomed to pent-up ex-
istence with lot of nuns! resolved
to send her box ul candy sometime
just to annoy her guardians. Then
my own affairs claimed attention.
Bates i asked. -"do you know
what Mr. Glenarm did with the plans
Ger this bouse?"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
gSg1a1Asgs2sl{SAE3
North Carolina Wonders

Mr.. Tom Pennell was down In An
tioch last week and stayed over night
with Mr.. Moses Armstrong. He tells
us that Mr.. Armstrong has a wonder
full pet pig, and he saw 1t himself
with broom sweeping out the yard.
OF course the pig couldn't do as well
at sweeping as some of his two-legged
brethren, but II was wonderful to see
how hard the pig worked and what
progress he made. Mr.. Armstrong
says he has wonderful gander. too.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
THE MAKING OF A NAN.

What man was made of: A small
quantity of dust. large quantity of
water and u much larger quantity OF
hot air.
What man ought to have been made
of: A steel frame covered with cork.
funnelshaped mouth papered with
asbestos, and goats stomach lined
with double copper plates.
Ii is guaranteed that this man will
not be affected by railroad and auto.
mobile accidents, boat wrecks, sub
way brushes, fires insurance compan-
les, doctors bills, breakfast foods and
all the other dire necessities of life
Huntley Child, in Life,
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23

The gander will climb an apple tree,
shake it and then get down and eat
the apples. Mr.. Pennel says he did
not see the gander but after seeing
the pig sweep he believed anything
Mr.. Armstrong told him-Wilkesboro
Chronicle.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
Complaints from the Kitchen,

II declare It IL hard" sulked the
Dough. Here / cant get the least bit
of rise for myself without being
worked"
Look at mel" sadly replied the
Egg. "AiHt ! always getting whipped
for other peoples desserts?'--Balti'
more American.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
Danger In Drinking Water.

Doctor Ito his patient, who Is Ill
with typhoid fever --This is probably
caused by some water you have drunk.
When did you last take some?
Patient-About three years ago, /
think.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
But Not the Hupglng.

What can we do to improve the
present method Of dancing?" thun-
dered the parson; dancing Is mere
hugging set to music"
I'VE might cut out the music" soft.
ly suggested the bad young man In
the rear OF the auditorium.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
SOAP and the Undertaken.

Weary Walker alters know'd II!
Tired Tatters-Know'd wot?
Weary Walker-Wot dat sign over
de way seq: Cleaning and Dyeing."
Tired Tatters--Well, wot erbout It.
Weary Walker-Why, alleri
know'd dey went tergether.-ChicagC
Daily News.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
Formulation VS.. Character.

Mrs. DE Poynt-I find that Mrs.
Van Swift is a thoroughly bad woman.
r. DE Poynt--And yet you invite
her here?
Mrs. De Poynt-Oh, that's all right.
None OF our set has found out about
1t yet.--Cleveland Leader.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
That's What Hurt.

II don't like that there Mrs. Swell,
man at ALL" said Mrs. Nuritch.
"Well, you amt got to take no no
tice OF her" replied Mr.. Nuritch.
"But the trouble is she don't taks
70 notice O. me-"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
Ingenious.

Ingenious.
"Lady," said Flooding Pete, ARE
you one o desc people dat hates
tramps?"
II am" was the prompt and de-
cisive answer.
well, wouldn't you like to show
your feelins by temptin' me to over
eat myself an putin de curse OF
dyspepsia on me?"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
The Optimistic.

Hicks-Yes, indeed, he's always
happy wien he's looking for work.
Wicks-Well. well, what a cheerful
disposition. And Is he never sad or
respondent?
Hicks-Only when he find 1t.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
Encores.

Patience-And did you scream when
he kissed you.
Patrice-Of course! But he said
he liked to hear me scream, so he de.
handed several encores!-YonkesJ
Statesman
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
Her Revenge.

There was young woman named Lulu
Who wished n rich man to come WOO Lu
But as none showed desire,
She got made as fire,
And went off and married a Zulu.
baltimore American.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-05-23
Something Wronu,

as your chauffeur thoroughly com.
petent?"
I'm afraid not. I've had him
month and he hasn't eloped with my
wife yet."--Judge.