davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1907-08-05

time. having gone 10 Lewiston TO at.
tend a quarterly meeting he was APP
preached in the street Boy several
young men who were oyIleu'. ont
for a good time Campn John
said the spokesman "Vho was the
DEVILS grandmother" THE deu.
grandmother" replied the old man 800
the quick sharp tone Characteristic
of hi, speech. the deyi. srauimUth.
or-how do you expect me 10 Keep
your family record2' Exchange.
The teacher was teaching a class In
the infant Sabbath school room and
was making her pupils finish eacn
sentence to show that they uud-f
stood her
"The idol had eyes" the teacher
said. bat It could not
see" caod jho children.
4, had ears. but it could not
Hear wa the answer.
"lt had lips she said "Uu, i,
couia not
Speak once more cried the ch,l.
dr'u
IT had a noise, but It could not"
Wine 1t shouted the children, ana
the lesson had to stop a momort-i'N.
char 90.
4 vol known scclpt5: ;ci5 il.o rsl.
lowing story.
"Wh.ucsor see taa.Ama. !
,hiuE uf q dinner tina, was g.,rH lu
Rome Ia honor cs two TarE!ah uo.
a!omcn
sat bcs!de tho y0unge. O! ,Aa NO
blcmcn u" glittorod with gold oa.-
broidcry and great diamonds. but ncy.
crthcloaa pitticd hlm sinccrcl, for
me- vas strange to our table r,auacra
AMI come Of his errors wora both
luu.c,,a5 and pa''f,l
'1ovgrd the dinrris end - ao!y.
ant extended 10 the young nan q
plate of toothpicks lie waived tho
plate away, saying in low and bitter
votes
"\u thank. yo'. haze lir-ad. eat.
on two Of the accurscd things anil
[ want no morc"-Tid Bi's
:
4 German woman was not long ago
watching a workman a. hc pat up
window fixtures in her house.
Don't you think that YOU have
placed those fixtures too high ask
ed -he. having reference 10 the cur
tain rolls last put In place.
1ihc wor <uan. stolid German
made no reply, but continued to al
just the fixtures.
Didn't you hear ms question do
/ y Cntcd tho lady OF the house. "!JoN
/ dlu' yCu be so ruuo?
Whercupon the German rulped con
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1907-08-05

Tulsa. |. T., Aug. Judge John r.
Thomas of Muskogec, nominated for
judge OF the supreme court from the
first district AT the republican state
convention, has declined TO run. The
vacancy on the ticket will be filled by
the state committee on rccommenda.
ton of the First district judicial com.
mittcc.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1907-08-05

Constabie-Did YOU notice what was
the number Of the car?
Terrified Teuton-Nein. He passed
TO kyick
Constable-Would you swear to the
driver again?
T. T.-Himmel, But know no more
words.-Bystander
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1907-08-05

DeWitt's Kidney ana Bladder Pills
are best for backache and weak kid
neys. Sold by Hoffman Drug CO.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1907-08-05

WANTED-Clean, white rags, at this
Office
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1907-08-05

Whenever an Office seeks the man.
Il doesn't have 10 hunt long
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1907-08-05
NEWSPAPER ChAFF

There is name.
An such name
Around which an others hover.
which an revere
As sweet and dear
The sacred name OF mother.
u was in Warrington Va 'hD car
~ part o' last week said a man who
travels and found 10 uac"s AIRY 20
transact some business with the
Keeper of one OF the small stores
there Before left tho store 80
man cam" in to buy a ham How
much - your ham, Mr. Soanis SO
shs Ask"t 'TWouty. s"y.u ard thr''.
quarter cent, TOund -aid ~" stnt"
kccper We'll Ill take thai one In
dicaune ham hanging from The c'il
ing How much docs ~ weigh
Eleven ppunds and half said m"
store keeper after placing u On N
scales Al right said the woman
How much viii II an be'' The -tor"
keeper came back toward me- with
scoWl on his face cues it all ne
said. = don't 1uow hnw much % will
bc. H. so, fractions a, both cuds'-
--Exct1nge
\ Ncw York lo;.ec quoted % Western
visitor rs say.us "Iga had some
queer experience ,a Wal; street.
but listen 20 this Recently ha!
been 20 the office Of c'rtaiu bank
er twicc between noon and Q o'ciocl
and hc had been az my offic" once
II vas q day fun of important wurE
Tor uH--o! considerable anxiety 90
me. A. 2:l5 called again. but the
banker was closctod with two men
and could not he disturbed 4 few mo.
mcnts another mau arrived and wac
shown lato 'hc inner Office Mufnod
sound of earnest conversation could
ia heard and an occasional motto OF
added emphasis Finally the visitor,
t-oopcl out mystcriously Well.
Smith. Z said as I faced the banker.
whom a-" yo1 stealing a march ON
this dmo2 Millions IN &c. suppose.
SO he replied. been organizing a
church choir Aud so he had EN
change
=
Campmectirg John Allen. grandfath
sr Of Madam Nordica. was for many
years picturesque figure among the
Methodist ministers In the state ot
Maine. He was good deal of waf
and his uttcrauccs were appreciated
hN Lnih mint nnh .innnr Al nna
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1907-08-05

selfrespec,ing calf in the British en-.
plre"
The waiter hung bis head for a
moment but recovered himself and
aid in tone OF respectful apollo
IS:
Iraally didn't intend to Insult you.
sir London AZ aw,rs.
=
Representative John Sharp vii.
liama tells OF an old darEy whom he
once encountered in q railroad STATEN
at Charleston. aad whom the con.
EreaamOn. expecting 10 remain In town
bat q few miEu;eG desired to take q
note 90 q friend in the city
are Jon sure yoa Eaow whore the
houac .s?' anxicusly inquired Mr.
Williams Il want ry friend to get the
note at once"
wen, suh.' answered the negro,
~ith a roll Of his eyes, 4 ony wish
had as many dollahs as knows
where that house is sab. THE Cir.
Gle.
-
Freddie had been spending the day
with his aunt and had been duly in.
structed beforehand as TO his beha.
vior Upon his return his mother ques.
toned him as to what he had said
and done while away from home. His
conduct seemed 10 have been most
exemplary in every way.
I'm glad you we're such a good III.
tie boy and didn't take a second hell.
ing Of meat"
NO. ma" replied Freddie. very
proudly. I'D remembered what you'd
told me and SAID I'd take two plates
OF ice cream instead Harper :
Weekly.
-
Tho outbor NJ n "r.m,era,ce Tow,"
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1907-08-05

American stage humorists steal It."
So the bargain was struck. All went
well until the early autumn. Mr.. Hoyt
went into his cellar TO see how much
coal he would have so have brought
for the winter. OF several tons on
hand in the spring only two or three
~cuttlefUls remained The theft was
readily traced 10 the engineers
urday Evening Post
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1907-08-05

Binks, after inviting his friend,
Jinks. who had just returned from
abroad. to dinner. is telling him what
fine memory his little son Bobby
has.
And do you suppose that he will
remember me?" said Jinks.
Remember you Why he remembers
every face he ever saw"
An hour afterwards when they had
entered the house and Jinks had sha.
ken hands with Mrs. Binks he called
Bobby over to him.
"Do you remember me. my little
man.
Course do. You'se the same fell
low that pa brought home last sum-
mer and ma wuz so mad about It that
she didn't speak to pa for whole
week "-Galvesto News.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1907-08-05

vuisiyely. and then replied in the
gentlest of voices:
i hat my mouth fun Of screws.
uud could not speak until ] -wai.
low some Harpers Weekly.
The young phy -icians We're oy.
changing news tpr the first time sine.
their graduation from the medical
school
i was surprised when / heard that
YOU had scttl d at Beech Hin" -aiI
one TO the other. laughing i've at.
ways heard It spoken of as a very
healthy suburb wonder ii you bad
found any patients there"
My dear man, said the cias1@ata,
earnestly 80 IS a healthy subGrl tx;
it IS also the stronghold C.. football
every family has i;s GU.snoh!!2. aaI
there uaylr TCa ZACH place tafore
for ewing chi!sro. parties r.. DOING
sp,rnd.a'r 'haaE .-T'-Yoit!'s CON.
uan!cn
The la. Senator MoYgu. said u
resident q! Selma "Sas a keen ma.
turc student. and nature faGins was
as abhoront TO him as 20 the greatest
pcr@oaaeo in the land
"i once aaw Senator Morgan throw
down q magazine with a sneer."
Another nature fake" he oxclaim-
al "Nhy, these things arc as alb
surd as-as absurd as"
He said that e. reminded him Ut
az address that he had once heard
an absent minded missionary make
In China. dear friends said the
mi ssionary. human life Is regarded
as Of slight value Indeed. II veal
thy Chinaman Is condemned TO death
ho can easily hire another 10 die for
him. and believe that many poor
fellows get their living by thus act.
ing as substitutes s"-Exchange
You cant convince me-" said Tn.
Gle Ebcn dat dar amt something
wrong VIII de patriotism dat is most
" distinguished by n headache de
mex moruin.' Exchange
r
In childhood's day.
Midst mirth and play.
when nothing does us bother:
OFT not We hear,
So sweet and clear.
Tho warning voice OF mother.
\ London exquisite had gone into
n West End restaurant and was far
from pleased with the way his ordei
was filled.
DO You call that veal cutlet?" h'
demanded OF the waiter "Why, sucl
cut'"t as that Is an insult to ever,
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1907-08-05

Wilton Lackaye. one might Judge
from his eternal air OF superiority,
ought to be above such ordinary. ev.
cry day human Weaknesses as repeat.
ing the smart sayings OF children.
However. 1t Is a healthy sign OF one
of his enviable pose. that he can sof.
ten enough to indulge IN the weakness.
He IS. in these cases, always the
spokesman for the one tot-his five.
yearold son. who already insists that
that soft "Will" by which his sire 4,
addressed by his intimates shall be
made over into the sturdier "Bill' in
his case Twas at Sunday school The
teacher asked him:
What became OF Nienyeh?"
Destroyed"
And OF Tyre"
"Punctured. Exchange
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1907-08-05

There is q name.
All such % name,
Around which an others hover.
which an revere
As sweet and dear.
The sacred name OF mother.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1907-08-05

You cant convince me-" said Tn.
Gle Ebon dat dar amt something
wrong VIII de patriotism dat Is most.
" distinguished by n headache de
ncx moruin' Exchange.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1907-10-17

"Good evening, Governor! And
how are all the little governors?"
Thus greeted the St. Louis Times.
There are no ''little governors" In the
executive mansion OF Missouri. The
home OF Governor and Mrs. Folk is
childless. Nor we're there any babies
in the mansion In Governor Dockery's
day nor In the years when Governor
Stephens held Missouri's highest Of
fee. Governor Stones children were
almost grown up when he was chief
executive, Governor Marmaduke was
q bachelor, Governor Phelps Wild
over and Governor Hardin had No
children. In the last quarter Of q
century only in the days Of Governor
Francis was the mansion filed with
babies, now big boys, with ''little
governors" in their own homes. In
general the Rooseveltian family Idea
has not prevailed at Missouri's CAPT.
tol, remarks the Columbia Herald
Nevada Mail.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1907-10-17
A Million For a Divorce.

Pittsburg, Pa, Oct. 14-Augustus
j. Hartjs is credited with having In.
creased to / million dollars his cash
offer to his wife il she would admir
the truth OF the charges ne filed
against her at the outsstliof their
now notorious divorce suit. In an
interview the paper manufacturer
admitted having offered to pay Mrs.
Hsrtje 100000 il she would con-
sent to q divorce quietly. Mrs.
Hsrtie refused this.
Hartje said: II declare and reiter-
ate that il Mrs. Harsie will In axe q
full avowal OF the truth Of thei chsrg-
es against her in connection with
Tom Nadine, the coachman, and
turn over the children TO me, there
fore permitting the divorce: decree l
seek to be granted, will see that
she lives as vol as she ever did,"
"Another lamentsble confession OF
weakness" said John F, Scott, !ath-
or oil Mrs. Hartis, when he heard OF
the offer. ''Ii Har ie has his case
won, as he now asserts, Why does he
hand out million dollars? Let him
keep his money. He will have use
for every cent OF It,"
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1907-10-17
Mother Chooses Husband.

Washington, Oct 14-The Score
tsry Of Commerce and Labor signed
On order refusing admittance to the
United States to little John Kriegel,
Of the Netherlands.
John Kriegel left his wife and child
In Holland and settled In Grand
Rapids, Mich, where he now has a
comfortable home for them. A
month ago he sent money across
the sea for Hendriks his wife, and
their little boy to join him.
The doctors at Ellis Island decided
that John was an imbecile and re-
fused to permit him to land. TIT
law does not permit exceptions ever
In the separation OF mother and
child, and John was ordered deport
ed.
His mother, forced to choose be
tween son and husband, decided ir
favor Of the husband. Another rela
tive will take little Johan back &c
Holland, and his father and mother
will live in Michigan.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1907-10-17
Mrs. Chadwick Very Low.

Columbus, O., Oct. 14.--Mrs. Cassie
Chadwick was reported much worse
at the woman's hospital ward In the
Ohio penitentiary. Her pulse is very
weak, and she is partly delirious.
Mrs. Chadwick is serving a ten
year term In the penitentiary for
wrecking the First National bank In
Oberlin, o. For some days she has
been unable to retain nourishment
and she is seemingly Indifferent to
her fase, and apparently resigned to
the fact that her end Is fast ap-
preaching. She has been in the peni-
Tertiary since January II, 1906, and
with good time to her credit would
have gotten out November 26, 1911.
Her. trouble Is attack OF heart fall
ure and weak stomach, the latter,
according to the physician, being
caused directly by indulging In rich
food. When she first came to the
prison, Mrs. Chadwick sent to aiash-
ionabls restaurant In the city Tor her
meals and ate the richest visnds.
Finally the prison officials ordered
that she be compelled to eat the reg
ular prison fare.
Mrs. Chadwick made profession oil
the Roman Catholic faith.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1907-10-17
GA g wo RIA.
Bear. I'll. 1ihs Kid You Haya Always Baugit
' g.: !; ''' ZH0z:z;I
Escaped From an Asylum.

Seattle, Wash, October.-Arthur
E. Fowler, OK secretary Of the Japan
ese-Korean exclusion league OF Seat
tie, escaped Tuesday from the ayslum
for insane In Steilacoom and came
to Seattle, where II is believed he is
being taken care Of by friends. Fow-
Ter was arrested In Bellingham three
weeks ago, examined BY q lunacy
board and sent to the asylum. He
started his work against the Orien.
tails In Seattle and enrolled the labor
unions for q nominal membership
fee. He expected to drive japanese
and Koreans out Of this part Of the
country. Ultimately he hoped to
drive them out Of the United States.
1t is said that bis exclusion work
drove him insane.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1907-10-17
OA0ToREA.
Beam III. H6i Kind You HAN Alxsr Bought
''': !; . ZMZzNx
To Protect the Indians.

Guthrie, Ok, Oct. 14.-John W.
Scothorn, assistant United States
district attorney, has brought man.
damus proceedings against several
persons In Blaine county to remove
them from Indian allotments which
they have leased from Indians with.
out the approval Of the Secretary Of
the Interior and are nov occupying
In defiance Of the orders Of the In
dian agent In Darlington. Similar
proceedings win be Instituted In every
county In Oklahoma, where Indian
allotments are held In this manner.
The Oklahoma Indians, always In
need Of money, b easily persuaded "a
leavs valuable sllotmsnts for Q mere
pittancs ct the sight Of ready cash.
In this way sIlotments worth several
hundred dollars . year each for agrk
cultural purposes ass renting posd.
bly, Tor - than Aity dollars . pear.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1907-10-17
For Killing a Preacher.

Tulsa, 1. T., Oct. IA In the cases
OF G. E. Wilson and Frank McGloth-
lin, deputy United States marshals.
indicted for murder In the first degree
for killing the Rev. Sylvester Morris,
an old Methodist minister, here two
months ago, Judge Lawrence denied
an appeal from the decision three
weeks ago, when he reiused the offl-
GERS liberty on habsas corpus. The
officers will be returned to the Mus
kogee federal iail, to await trial.
The Rev. Mr.. Morris was mistaken
for bootlegger, one night, andshot
when be ignored . command nom
the officers to halt. 80
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1907-10-17
Father Saves Negro Who
Attacked His Daughter.

Memphis, Tenn, Oct. 14-Prstty
little Ida May Broadway, the 3-yser-
old daughter Of Leonard Broadway,
a butcher and dairymsn, living
about four miles east Of the city,
Was brutally assaulted by Henry
JohEsoa, a 19-ySss cls negro.
The negro was caught after q
chase by q posse headed by the girls
father, and composed Of enraged
neighbors. There was q desperate
attempt made to lynch the negro,
and this was only prevented by the
girls father, who pleaded that the
law be allowed to take Its course.
The little girl had been left alone
In the house with the negro Johnson,
soon after noon, while har parents
went to the home Of Mr.. Brosdwsy's
father, q short distance away. The
negro was asleep in a room IN the
the house aud the little girl was
locked In the house. The first the
parents knew Of the crime was when
the little girl ran screaming to her
grandiather's house, where she told
her trouble.
Newspaper men chartered an auto
mobile aud met the wagon contain
ing the negro and transferred him to
the machine, placing him between
them and taking him to the police
station.
In q cell at the station the negro
admitted that he had committed the
deed, but did not think, he said, he
had done anything wrong.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1907-10-17
Village Ways.

In discussing the action Of Fulton,
Fayette and other towns 10 ordering
the hitch racks removed from the
square, the Springfield Lsader-Dem
ocrat says:
Springfield once used the square
as q city lot and camping grounds
When the effort was made to remove
the farmers, city hacks, job wagons,
etc., a mighty roar went up. "New
town" got out handbills inviting the
farmers to 60 over there and many
went. The ordinance was finally re
pealed and the farmers ccme back,
Finally another ordinance was pass
cd closing the square as q public
market and this time 1t held. We
had an awful fight to keep the cows
up and pigs we're at one time allow
cd to run at large.
Our Village ways are passing. We
still dump garbage In the alleys lei
chickens range In our neighbors
yards and block the sidewalks with
displays Of goods, but all this will b
changed. People, as rule, resent 9
change. but after they get used to II
would not return to she same ole
way.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1907-10-17
Average Kansas Corn Crop.

Topeka, OFT IA II probable yield
OF Is million bushels OF corn for
Kansas Is estimated by E. j. Smiley,
secretary OF the Kansas Grain Deal.
ers' association. This Is only Z mil
lion less than Secretary Coburn's
estimate Of the crop OF 1906, and
sbout the average of she past five
years.
The corn is poor according to Mr.
Smiley, in the counties Of Jewell,
Mitchell, Smith, Osborne, Philipps,
Rocks, Norton and Decatur, and is
insufficient for the home, demands,
Corn is even now being shipped into
these counties and retails readily at
60 cents per bushel.
There is an average crop In Reno,
Barton, Rice, KinRmsn, Harper,
Barber aud a fair crop fin Pawnee,
Stafford ana Mcpherson counties
Southeast Kansas, In Bourbon, AL.
len, Woodson, Wilson, Neosho, Craw'
ford, Cherokee aud Lsbette counties
with the exception OF she valley oil
bottom lands, has poor corn, tn,
yield being light and the. equality
poor.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1907-10-17
Stock in Their Cars Too Long

X. @. star.
Fines aggregating $4,000 were as
sessed against the Chicago, Rock
Island & Pacific; Atchison, Topeka
L Santa Feand Burlington railroads
by Judge Smith Mcpherson OF the
United States circuit court. The or.
der was filed In the federal court at
st. Joseph, NO., where A. s. Van
Valkenburgh, United States district
attorney, brought the case. The
fines we're for violating the.,.twenty.
sight.hour law In the shipment OF
live stock,
There were twenty cases In all and
the minimum fine OF 500 was as.
sessed In each case. Ten cases we're
against the Chicago, Rock Island &
Pacific, eight against the. burlington
and two against the Atchison, To.
peka & Santa Fe. The maximum
penalty prescribed by law isi:$500
for each violation. Mr., Van. Vslken.
burgh insisted that the maximum
fine be imposed, as the live stock had
been kept In transit ior.irom thirty
eight to iorty-eight hours without
rest or water. The law prescribes
twenty EIGHT hours as the..limit.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1907-10-17
Harder "Starting" Now.

The Moberly Democrat very sensi.
bly, remarks:
"No business has changed more
than has the newspaper business in
the last few years. They used to exc
out q bare existence for a number OF
years. but now, II either makes
money or goes "busted" In a short
time. Its fast becoming one OF the
most expensive businesses, In so far
as equipment is concerned, in which
one can engage and the amount OF
capital necessary to make 1t a sue
cess has largely increased"
The Democrat speaks advisedly.
The time has passed when starting q
newspaper Is psstime to be indulg-
ed in by every aspiring genius as a
hot air value or little clique OF poll.
ticians who have some ak to grind.
The average newspaper, is now print.
cd from plant which excells In cost
that Of the average store by several
thousand dollars. The day Of cheap
labor and cheap material In the
printing office are over, and tho con.
stantly increasing demands for good
service make the publishing OF a
newspaper a serious business and
one which requires the closest AT.
tention.
The history OF newspaperdom In
Chillicotheis marked by the wreckinQ
Of many ambitious hopes and the
survival OF the old-timers, and this
is the experiencein many other cities
As expenses increase the weakling,
drop out and he Is not only brave
but foolish who bucks the game with
a new paper unless he has money tc
burn. -Chillicothe Constitution.