davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21

IL baTnufn ana ne mas q great ADMIRATION
for the genius Of the late American king
Of humbuggery."
"Barnum was far-seeing man." he said,
in speaking Of his relations with the show
man. When he came to London went to
him and proved to him that could give and
was giving the best value for the money
hereabouts. He saw the ultimate advan-
tage to his show and gave me tho contract
for the feeding Of his visitors.
~
Fifteen years ago I started these tea
shops about London. Today I have up
ward Of 100. employ more than 10, 900 people
In connection with them and feed BOO, 900
Londoners daily. At the same time have
been gradually acquiring my big restau-
rants like the Trocadero and the Popular
until today I have almost Dozen"
asked MI Lyons If he contemplated ex-
tending his chain of teashops and restau-
rants to other cities of England.
London Is field large enough for the
most ambitious of men," he answered. with
laugh. There are 100000 people here;
when l am feeding all who can afford to
pay for it I will be satisfied"
AT one time Mr.. Lyons was threatened
with American competition. j. Herman
Wymans. whose quick-lunch restaurants
were highly successful in Boston, came
mere a few years ago to start restaurants
On similar lines in London.
Il have looked the field over" he said to
me few weeks before he began OPERA
tons, land America offers nothing equal
to 1t. There are barrels Of money to be
made In the catering business in London
and I'm going to pull my barrel out of it.
Look what Joe Lyons has done. He's a
decent chap, too. l have had several talks
with him and he doesn't a bit mind nv
taking hand in the game. In fact, he was
good enough to give me some information
about conditions here. OF course, he has
his ideas, and 1 have mine, but London
is big enough for both Of us. American
fare and American cooking are better than
English fare and English cooking, as Eng
fish stomachs will be quick to acknowledge
when they get the chance I'll give them.
l shall start with one restaurant but 1t
won't be long before 1 have several going
Alas, poor Wymans! He spoke with
Napoleonic confidence, but in London he
met his Waterloo: His first restaurant
failed and then he tried another, and that
fellow went to Paris and died.
l questioned Mr.. Lyons about Wyman's
abortive enterprise.
Such places are bound to fail here" he
said. THE Englishman is very different
person from the American in the matter of
his meals. The latter spends five minutes In
eating his meal and twenty minutes in
picking his teeth on the front steps; the
Englishman spends twenty minutes in eat
ing his meal and five minutes in picking
his teeth. We do not like to eat quickly
here and the so-called quick-lunch has no
attractions to the average man. We eat
slowly and sparingly in the middle of the
day, reading a paper book the while.
We eat very much less than the Americans.
and the portions served In the American
restaurants If placed before our customers
would sicken them by their size"
ERNEST L. HEITKAMP.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21

Just a word about the office in which he
received me. 1t Is but cubby hole on the
ground floor OF the big Trocadero restau-
rant In point Of size 1t cannot be more
than six feet long and five feet wide. 1t
contains a fiat top desk at one end, two
chairs. an umbrella rack and constantly
jingling telephone. In the ten minutes ]
was with him Mr.. Lyons made three ap-
pointments over this little instrument, and
1 wondered II that was fair average for
every ten minutes in the day: From this
room, bare Of show and ostentation and
elaboration, this wonderful man conducts
his great business.
Mr.. Lyons belongs to that race which,
given fair field, pushes it's way to the
front everywhere. He is Hebrew, slightly
bald and wears jewelry. On the little finger
of his right hand two rings with diamonds
Of bewildering size and color arrest one s
attention; from the folds Of a black tie a
diamond pin of equal brilliance vies with
them for the notice of the visitor. He is
affable, immensely affable, and, waving me
to the better of the two chairs in the rooms,
announced his willingness to do anything
in the world he could for me.
lie answered my questions almost before
l had finished them and showed an init
mate knowledge of the details Of his bust
ness.
II was born in London" he said. LAS a
boy l drifted about Europe and even paid
a visit to the United States, not so common
a thing then 1t is today. All this time
I was studying art with the intention of
devoting my life to it, but twenty years
ago, after looking the field over, I decided
that the restaurant business needed me
vastly more than did art. 1t needed a revo-
lutionary spirit, and in me 1t found the
fulfllment of that need. I saw among
other things, that the visitors to expo
sltions and places Of that character were
being fleeced by the men who were running
the restaurants. The proprietors of these
places seemed to think that after people
had paid their admission fee at the gate
they were legitimate prey and could be
charged anything. When l came into the
field changed all that, and the principle
established then have followed all through
my business career. A large part of my
success can be traced directly to it.
have tried to give the best quality and the
largest quantity consistent with a small
price"
Mr.. Lyons was an intimate friend Of P.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21

no facilities at Aberdeen for cooking such
dinner, and London is 600 miles away"
Leave that to me-" answered Mr.. Lyons,
with smile.
The day OF the dinner arrived and yet
no preparation had been made in Aberdeen
for so large a dinner. The high commits
sioner was visibly worried. Can you
imagine his surprise when a special train
pulled in from London bearing COO walters
and attendants and the dinner ready
cooked?
This is the spirit in which Mr.. Lyons
executes his orders, and that Is the spirit in
which he accepts them.
DO not ask me II can do it," he says
Give me your order and leave the rest
to me-"
His most surprising characteristic is his
many-sidedness. Here is man apparently
STEPPED in the routine and detail Of extra
ordinary business activity, who declares
his intention of devoting himself to fiction
to the extent Of turning out three romantic
stories year. Even with the aid of an
able collaboration that would be a task In
itself worthy the whole time Of a man who
gives his days unreservedly to literature
of organization and direction Mr.. Lyons
has kept steadily at youthful bent for
painting to such good purpose that several
of his landscapes have found their way to
the walls of the Royal Academy, an honor
denied to all but a small portion Of the
increasing number of men and women who
make art their life work. Poetry has also
occupied the mind of this versatile man,
and tucked away in one of the drawers Of
his desk at home Is an unpublished play
which may yet brave the censorious ink OF
the English critics and make its bow to a
London audience.
With such a multiplicity Of contracts and
the duties which they must entail one
would imagine that Mr.. Lyons would be
rushed to death, yet, despite the fact that
he Is probably one Of the busiest men in
i London, he never gets excited and never
gives one the impression that he Is ''hust-
ling" as that Is understood in the United
States. I saw an illustration of this side Of
his character when visited him yesterday.
II will take just fifteen minutes of your
time, no more" I said. In ten minutes I
was standing in the street outside the Tro-
cadero, with all my questions answered and
Mr.. Lyons with equal speed and thorough
ness, was disposing of another visitor.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21
The Aged Babe.

w r. Trimmer OF Molino. Fla, says
there are no happy faces in New York.
Mr. Trimmer. an aged, healthy, cheerful
man, visited New York last month and the
strained worried look of the New Workers
shocked and dspleased him.
You live too fast Mr.. Trimmer said
to a reporter. THAT is your trouble, fast
living. Your very children have an aged
air Why
He gave a loud laugh.
Did YOU ever hear about the New York
child and the Christening? No? Then
listen.
There was young couple on the East
side that postponed the christening of
their first born TIL the little fellow was
three years Old.
"He was, Of course. very wise for three.
He had gotten about a lot. In short he
was a New Yorker.
And the morning of the christening in
the hUshed and crowded church. when the
clergyman took the white-robed babe in his
arms and sprinkled its small face plenti-
fully with water. il grimaced and splut-
tered ana shouted up angrily in the good
priests face:
Hey cheese it. will We? If ye do that
asin, I'll blf ye one.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21
ANECDOTES TOLD BY AND ABOUT WEII.-KNOWN PEOPLE

night II he failed to arrive, then his part
would be assigned to some one else
well. the man patched his worn boots
with patent thread, pinned up his few be-
longinss in a newspaper and set out in the
early moving on foot along the towpath.
He had only a few coppers, hence the
train was an impossibiNty.
But after the poor fellow had covered
some six or seven miles his boots gave out
blisters rose on his feet, fatigue overcame
him and in despair he threw himself on
the grass beneath a tree.
LAS he lay there in a bitter mood, a canal
boat hove in sight. It.drew near slowly
and an idea seized the actor.
"'Captan" he shouted. rising hurriedly
Captain, pull UP, for the love of heaven"
wall, wot dye want?' said the cap
tain. as he stopped the boat.
Captain said the actor. I have to get
to Quag tonight to play second heavy in
THE Evil That Men Do" | am footsore
and weary and can walk no further If
you will assist me | will work my pas
sage
1.-The captain gave the actor a kindly
nod.
Right y'are, he said. Lead the boss ;"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21
Jo5EpH ENoMS >1oR{aNq ON A PICTURE.

| in the Hobbies Of his swagger restau-
| rants waiting their turn to book seats for
luncheon, for tea, for dinner. For the
Trocadero, probably the most famous Of the
bohemian restaurants OF London; the
Throgmorton, the Delmonico's Of the finan-
cial district; the Popular Cafe, the gather
ing place Of Mayfar's $50 on shopping
bent; the Birkbeck, the Blenheim, the Vic
toria Mansions and the Challis Hotel are
some of the big restaurants under the
thumb of this wonderful little man.
Strange as 1t may seem, Mr.. Lyons sees
nothing Incompatible in his dual role-this
catering for rich and poor at the same
time. For instance, upon several occasions
Mr.. Lyons has catered for the king and
Prince Of Wales, and yet SO well does he
| understand the comparatively poor that he
Is by general choice the caterer to large
part of hungering London. He contends
that the same principle underltes catering
for all stations Of life and that success in
one means success in all But to an out
slider such a state Of affairs is hard to I'M
derstand. Imagine II you can, the same
man running the bennett and Childs string
of restaurants. and the st. Regis Cafe
Martin and Sherrys in New York and YOU
will be able to form some idea of the pecu'-
lar position occupied by Mr.. Lyons Tie
idea is almost absurd to the average man.
yet this little man delights in trying the
absurd and the impossible
But his restaurants form only a part Of
his immense business. He is. besides, a
general caterer, and no contract is too
large for him to tackle with a serene co..
fidence, which Is perhaps one of his most
interesting characteristics. A friend of his
recently told me he believed that if some
one went to Lyons and said Feed the
world he would take the contract That
Is but one way of expressing the general
confidence in the almost unlimited posi-
bilities OF his organization.
He Is for all the world like the juggler
who keeps half dozen balls in the air at
the same time, for, while he is feeling
800, 600 Londoners, he is providing for the
visitors to the Irish international exhibition
at Dublin to the number of many thou
sands, he is dispatchng a corps of walters
and provisions to a remote corner of Scot
land or Wales for some public or private
function, his assistants to the number Of
several hundred dispensing tea and
sandwiches and cakes to the $4,000 specta-
tors of foot ball match at Crystal Palace
and he is feeding the passengers at all the
stations of the London, Chatham and Dover
railway.
Mr.. Lyons well-known willingness to
undertake anything in the catering line
has brought him some unique contracts
Lord Strathcona, high commissioner for
Canada, came to him recently. and said:
Il am entertaining $500 guests in Aber-
deem. Can yo' provide a dinner for them %
Certainly" replied Mr. Lyons, quietly.
But said Lord Strathcona, I'VE have
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21
The Legal Fare.

Ambassador Bryce, at a dinner in Ur-
bana, ILL.,, gave young lady some tips on
European travel
And above ALL he said, don't fail to
tip your cabman literally. Hansoms and
four-wheelers would be cheap in London IL
one only paid the legal fare for them, but
he who tries to pay the legal farewell, he
doesn't try ii more than once.
lone day l saw an old lady stop a han
som, look up at the driver and say timidly:
Driver, | want to go to Ludgate Circus.
l see by the book that the legal fare Is .
shilings. If l give you will you promise
not TO swear at me afterWard?'"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21
It Looked Good.

Al tea said Washington woman.
the late Julia Magruder told us story
apout little girl whom she once took out
to luncheon
Al the iuncheon's end Miss Magruder
handed her waiter a $50 bill, and the man
Drought back on a plate great mound of
greenbacks and silver.
The little girl looked at the huge mound
of change longingly
" If you please, Hiss Magruder,' she said,
L II have plate OF that, too
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21
Living Death.

THE late Senator Morgan said a res
ident of Selma, was keen nature student
and nature taking was abhorrent to him
to the greatest personages In the land
Il once saw Senator Morgan throw down
a magazine with a sneer.
Another nature fake he exclaimed
Why, these things are as absurd as-as abb
surd as
And then he laughed and said that II
reminded him of address that he once
heard an absent minded missionary make
I'm China, dear friends, said the mis-
sonary human life is regarded as of but
slight value. Indeed, If wealthy China
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21
ORDERLY.

Batter.
Judge-"You declare that hunger forced
you 10 break into the dining room But you
also stole pair of boots that were there.
What have you to say TO that"
Burglar-"rhat boots do not belong in the
dining ROOM
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21
No Real Change.

Controller Metz of New York said the
other day OF bill that he disliked:
Il object to this bill because it would
accomplish nothing. 1t would make no
real change. 1t would be like the OF
the actor and the canal boat captain.
There was once upon a time an actor
who. after an enforced idleness of two
months, was lucky enough to secure an
engagement in town twenty-five miles
away.
The case was a hurry-up one. 'The
actor had 10 reach the distant town that
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21
Good Hunting,

DIR. Seward Webb said an editor "once
showed me over Shelburne farms his spen-
didly stocked estate in Vermont. l compli-
mented him on the abundance of game at
Shelburne and he told me an appropriate
story.
1T was a story about young clubman
He looked up from his mail one morning
and murmured:
'Beastly Simply beastly'
What is the matter? some one asked.
Here is an invitation said the young
man. from chap who owns 10000 acres in
New Hampshire. He wants me to go wild
boar shooting there
Well why don't you go?' said his
friend
Ah-er-I don't know the young man
hesltated. I-er-haven't got the fare for
one thing; and-er-you have to find your
own boars for another So perhaps haven t
missed much
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21
Twain to the Ladies.

Mary Twain" said Chcagoan. crossed
the Atlantic with me on the Minneapolis
last month. and his conversation made the
captains table very gay.
The ladies continually encirced the
humorst. and the last night on board he
proposed a toast in their honor
me ladies' he said, raising his glass
and bowling. The ladies-second only to the
| press in the dissemination of news"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21

he said. but 1 admit that many of our
myriad nature writer's are. These men s
Idea of a lie seems too closely to resemble
that of a little boy l know.
The boys teacher said from her desk one
afternoon:
L want every pupil who has never told
a lie to hold up his hand
There was a doubtful pause. Two or
three hands were raised. Then my little
friend piped out
Teacher. is 1t lie if nobody finds it
Out?"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21
Where Humor Dwells.
North American ReElew.

From the North American Review.
Humor dwells with sanity and common
sense and truth. Her sisters are sympathy
and humanity. Beside her walks noble
seriousness. The mentor whose influence
she obeys is yelled reverence for certain
Ideals.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21
Vanity.

ApropOs of vanity, Secretary Root told at
Yale about politician who, the day before
he was to make a certain speech, sent a
forty-one- page report of it to all the pa
pers. On page 20 appeared this para graph:
But the hour grows late, and l must
close Ono, no.! Go on! Go on!)"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21
No. Not as a Rule.

George p. Angel, Boston's brilliant and
powerful defender of animals from cruelty
was talking about nature taking.
My friend Will Long is no nature faker,"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21
Absolutely Reliable
Stories by Sufferers

OF weather yarns now occupy tho
spare time OF some OF the govern
ment employees, men from different
states vying with each other in relating
absolutely reliable stories OF some of the
FRANKS played by Old Sol.
Il have heard of some OF the strange
and remarkable happenings during the
heated season." says Pard Julian. an en-
ploye Of the government printery. and who
halls from Nebraska, but none OF them
can hold candle for hot season We had
In Nebraska about thirty years ago. / re-
member that Old Sol came down SO fur-
ously that It set fire to barn con'a ming
popcorn, and just about that time n hot
wind came along and drifted the popcorn
over the fields like snow drifts Tha drifts
were so natural that an old man froze TO
death in one OF them. That spell made II
so dry that people had TO run wells through
a wringer to get water enough to cook with
Even now In some parts OF the state farm
ers have to soak their hogs over night
before they will hold swill. There are
some places in Nebraska where water is
wet only on one side. l knew a man who
owned ferry boat, and he had to haul
water eleven months in the year TO keep
his ferry running. 1t gets so dry that
water becomes SO scarce that some people
won't drink 1t. and some OF them don't
even drink water after they leave the
state"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21

man is condemned to death he can easily
hlre another to die for him: and believe
many poor fellows get their living by thus
acting as substitutes
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21

but it Is rather low in the neck, and before
the young lady
But she laughed and interrupted him:
oh. don't mind me- she said. III shut
my eyes. Go on
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21

DIR. Hew Morrison. Andrew Carnegie's
chief advls here in the matter of bestow-
Ing free libraries, made a notable statement
~ a meeting of the Edinburgh public
lbrary committee the other night 1t was
That during May there was q decrease of
borrowing in all the libraries as compar, d
with the corresponding month last year, and
that THIS decrease was mainly in fiction
and books for juveniles Further. he said.
the same thing was taking place all over
the country The chairman of the commit
tee hazarded the suggestion that novel
reading had gone out of fashion. the reason
being THAI We have nowadays no great
noVei'sts Ike Dickens, Thackeray or K L.
Stevenson - inspire the public with A
taste for hcIou Tho more obvious expla-
nation would seem 10 Doe that readers can
buy their own fiction now at such a re-
markedly low price that they do no, take
the trouble TO go to- the Iinra..,s TO oh
tain Il. CHAIR rs pf;prHrC
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21
Depends on the Dogs.

Asa Goddard of the American Automobile
Association was recounting in Worcester
some of his touring adventures.
One summer morning. he said, 1.-The ap-
proach of a great flock of sheep obliged me
to pull off the narrow country road
halted my car. and watched with interest
the passage of the sheep, the intelligent
dogs and the shepherd
Il had a short talk with the shepherd
about his odd and difficult trade.
Look here, | said what do you do
driving sheep like this on narrow road
when you meet another flock coming in the
opposite direction?'
Well said the shepherd. we just drive
straight oF. both of We, and the one that
has the baAt dogs gets the most Sheep"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21

The Hon. Winifred Norton. who was mar
ried on Wednesday to Mr.. William Ten
nant. is great granddaughter of the ia
nous Mrs. Norton, who was Lord Mel
bourne's friend and the heroine OF the story
that she gave away to the Times newspaper
the secret Of Sir Robert Peers intention to
abolish tn corn laws. Readers of Mere
dith Will remember what use the great
novelist made of that story In Diana of
the Crossways.' The Hon. Eleanour Nor
ten, twin sister of the Hon. Wlnifred Nor
ton, would appear to have inherited the
literary aptitude of her distinguished an
cestress, for she IS the author of a play
which wa performed some time ago. for
copyright purposes only. at a London thea
ter.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-07-21
The Lady and the Story.

Quonah Parker, the millionaire chief of
the Comanches. was discussing in Guthrie
a new Indian bill.
The bill is good" said the chief 1T
would not have any effect. 1t reminds me
of a young French lady in Washington.
Il was dining in Washington at an am
bassador's house, and this young lady was
the only female guest. An Italian duke
wanted to tell a story, but he hesitated.
My story he said, lis very good one,