The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1907-07-18
FAMOUS REToRTs CHARACTER.
iZEp BY BREvITY.
eepvIss OF Noted Men Who Were
Quick to Seize UP an opportu-
nifty to Make .
Joke,

Brevity has. been the marked char
acteristic Of many happy retorts. What
could be more crushing, more grimly
witty than the reply attributed to Tai
lyrand on an occasion when certain
notorious parsonage, i'll and in great
pain, said that he was suffering the
torments of the lost. Swiftly came
the wicked retort: "Deja"-already?
OF different complexion, but equal
ly exemplifying the soul of wit, was
the reply, which has been attributed to
various painters, to a questioner who
wished to know the vehicle with which
the painter mixed his colors. DR..
John Brown tells the story of Opie.
PRAY, Mr.. Opie, may j ask what
you mix your colors within said a
brisk dilettante student to the great
painter With brains. SIR was the
gruff reply--and the right one"
Single word replies, more or less
witty says the London Globe, are fair.
ly common. A patient whom the fa'
nous DR. Abernethy had advised to
take walk on an empty stomach
calmly replied: "Whose?"
A recent example was the answer Of
the late Dean Hole to a boring Cock
ney fellow travelling on the Great
Northern railway. What comes after
'Itchin?'" asked the bore. "Scratchin,"
came the swift retort, and thereafter
the conversation tagged.
Many brief and telling replies are
laid to the account of Douglas .Jer-
rold. 1t will suffice to recall one.
whats going on?" said a bore, stop.
ping Jerrold in the street. "I am"
and the speaker suited the action to
the word.
Akin to this was the answer OF
John Wesley to the clustering swag.
gerer who pushed against him on the
path, with the insulting remark: 81
never make way for a fool" 81 al
ways do" said Wesley, quietly step.
ping aside, and then placidly pursuing
his way.
Brief and witty was the reply of
Catholic cleric to an opponent in ar
gument who had declared his disbe-
lief in purgatory. You might go far.
ther and fare worse" was the eccles.
iastic's parting shot.
The wit of more than one of DR..
Johnson's crushing retorts was en-.
hanced by brevity, but examples are
to familiar to be quoted Johnson
came down like a sledge hammer on
Scotland andsthings Scottish. Less ia.
miliar, perhaps, is the retort in which
a Scotchman scored An Englishman
in Scotland was abusing the country,
complaining of the state of the lard.
er and wondering where he could get
less TO eat.
Il could tell ye a place whaur We
wad get less said the Scot, who was
listening to the TRADE. where's
that?" asked the other.
oh, just whaur an Englishman's
been!" said the Scotsman dryly.
Brevity as the soul of wit is exem.
plified in many popular sayings. Wit
is by no means an inevitable ingre-
dent In proverbs. Many of them are
or doubtful sense, and some are fool.
ish, yet there is a certain spice. The
definition of proverbs by Howell as
Sayings which combine sense. short.
ness and salt" is in the main true
Though truth may be altogether alb.
sent and wit barely perceptible. yet
there must be a certain salt" which
gives life and SAVIOR to the saying.
II would be difficult to find saw.
ings more telling than some OF the
shortest-such, for instance, as Fore
warned forearmed" Extremes meet"
or the ancient Inter malleum ct in.
cudem" (Between the hammer and. 1.-The
anviD. Many sayings which in Eng.
lish are short were briefer still in
their original classical form.
That the soul of wit was exempli.
fed most strikingly among the Greeks
Is only what we should expect. II is
curious to remember that our word
"laconic" preserves the memory of
the reputation for conciseness of
speech borne by the people of one part
OF Greece-the Laconia2s or Spartans.
When Philip of Macedon threatened
them, IF ! enter Laconia | will level
your city to the dust" thew mada tba