The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-15

Merry Chris 'mas,' 'Th' same to ye, Patrick, Bill, Etienne, Jovanny, Car los, Hans, Mikeovitch or Epannymon- das.' Billyons iv childher will be vel lin in hundherd diff'rent languages: Oh, look what I got In tn avenin' millyons iv ganial men will be standln' at tn heads iv tables, slappin' carv- in knife on a steel an thin goin' at a turkey an performin' miracles iv scien- tific distribution. Pleasant wurruds
 will go round. I'll have some more iy
 thim mashed potatoes Pass tn cran-
 berry sauce.' Father, if ye'er not
 careful yell have nawthin' left fir ye'ersilf.' Tn family jest will go round. Little boys will look sadly at what Is
 left of tn noble bird an reflect, as
 Hogan says, on tn vanity iv human
 ambition in tn eating line. An that
 night Dock O'Leary, passin' by my
 place, will hand me tn same remark
 that ne's handed me fir thirty years:
 T must go home arly, f'r tomorrow Is me busy day. But l don't mind 1t. don't care whin people get indigestion firm overeating. It's whin they have it firm not gettin enough to eat that Pm worrid,' says he.
 Father Kelly says Chris mas is feelin' as well as a feast. About this time iy tn year tn Chris mas feelin' comes along an gives ye nudge. Ye'er thinkin about cuttin' down ixpinses an savin' money, an tn Christmas spirit whispers in ye'er ear: Come, give up.' Out says ye, why shud I be buyin things fir people that don't want thim because they're goin' to buy things fir me that don't want because they think I'm buyin' things fir thim that they don't want because I think they're buyin' things f'r me that I don't want?' None iv ye'er business,' says tn spirit iv Christmas Loosen up. An tn first thing know ye'er in a joolry store buyin gold watch an chain an a damon shirt stud fir me, I think not but I hope.
 q always hope about Chris'ma time that I'm goin' to get somethin' that I've always wanted, but so far, havin' passed matther iv sixty Chris'mases, | 70 had little luck iyer since I was a boy an wanted pony an got caddy- chism have in tn cellar as large q colliction iv green neckties, slippers an book marks as Jake Felsenthal has on sale. An yet don't mind it. Tn sufferin's I endure firm gettin prisints is offset be tn pleasure I inflict in givin' thim. know that on Christmas eve yell come in here an I'll reach undher tn bar an toss out to ye a small box with tn remark: Here's a little somethin' I've got fir ye. An yell open 1t up an pretind to be over whelmed with pleasure an surprise whin ye see yellow cravat with green stripes. Well, upon me wurrud, how did ye come to think iv this? There must be something in thought trans ference, fir this is tn very thing was hopin' some wan wud give me- An thin ye reach into yeer coattail pocket an pull out a package. I reel with joy at tn sight iv cardboord match box to hang on tn wall, an take ye be tn hand an say: 'Ra-aly, Hinnissy, feel I oughtn't to take this. Why did ye go to such expense fir me? It
 makes me poor little gift look so triv- val An tn next week obsarve that ye'er not wearin' tn millinery I give ye, an ye note that still get me matches out iv me vest pocket, an nayther iv us cares a sthraw wan way O. another. But if ye hadn't given me aunything. wed both feel mad. There