The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1907-09-05

ATcHlsoN GLOBE SIGHTS.


T. Better make excuses IMAM throw
the blame on some one else.
The only thing easy OF accomplish
ment in this world is TO be poor.
Some men seem to enjoy a toothpick
as much as others enjoy a cigar.
Some men are called conservative"
when In reality they are only slow.
There are very few unhappy mar
riages; the unhappiness comes later.
What has become OF the old-fashiclied
ma who wore leather suspenders:
A woman who is loved by her hus-
band and children Is always all right,
Whenever we see q lion tanner, we
wonder how he escaped being an agent.
When a man can be nypnotized to
dc a thing. he wanted to do it any
way.
Toned horse that scares at a railroad
train.
There is always a good demand for
hands at harvest time and in the ham
mock.
When children play school, getting
pastime.
1t is light housekeeping when a
couple eats two meals out of three
with kin.
When q man thanks o for pointing
out an error he has made, he doesn't
mean II.
A great many more women are too
tender hearted to kin a chicken than
are v~egetarians.
A woman is fairly well pleased with
the weather If she can manage to keep
her hair in curl.
Our idea of a trusting nature is a
person who calls what he buys from an
agent a bargain"
When a man quits a job, his en-
ployer is apt to say. He CAV up the
a of his life"
The timid person wastes a good deal
of time, after 1t is over, telling what
he felt like saying.
Put a ring in your nose and n
woman will not notice it if she has
her children with her.
They say of an Atchison man that he
has SO little sense that he amt appre-
ciate a pretty woman.
About the only thing that can be
said in favor of store teeth is tina
they are better han hone
When we see a woman elaborately
dressed. we always wonder how she
gets herself apart at night.
What has become of the old-fash-
Toned man who crossed his legs and let
his little son ride his foot?
If it wasn't for his wife. the average
man would use 4 handkerchief until
1t was as black as the stove.
Occasionally a man objects to fire.
quent bathing on the ground that too
many baths are Weakening"
How the ROSTERS are catching it
now. Wherever you go these days,
you rave fried rooster to eat.
Occasionally a man plays for a hero
medal. and only succeeds in attracting
the attention of the fool killer.
Listen TO any woman five minutes
and you will hear her say that she is
particular to 90 this or that.
You may think you are handicapped
Syyf Ht-yr - tro ~-L |
corn on he cob is plentiful.
Answer to correspondent. No. a good
business head does not include an abil-
fty to mind other peoples business.
Some women have such a tender,
sympathetic nature they are almost as
easily affected rs the stock market.
We can't all look at things in the
light: No doubt the man whc
wears sidewhiskers admires them.
The man who hires his children to
be good gets the results obtained
by the father who uses a whip.
The chances are usually about even
the men who wont let well
enough alone win make matters much
worse.
Some people spend half their time
what they intend to do, and the
other half explaining why they didn't
do it.
AS q general rule, the person who is
= good Ice skater. regards roller skat-
Ing a good les the way a boy re CARDS
walking.
The trouble some men will take to
whisky Is not small. but it seems
triftng compared with the trouble the
brings.
So many expressions are erroneous,
for instance. you often hear, He is as
brown as a berry" Who ever heard of
q brown berry?
We are thankful that there is no one
nTOllnd 0Jlr hnYfSo Uhn fpSicf ~ roo,lGEl
aloud the Mr.. Dooley Letters. in
he Irish dialect.
1t may look as though you regularly
get he worst of 1t in everything, but
you don't Fate is too big to fool with
any one individual.
the papers besides the accounts of
men who are going to the harvest
fields for their health.
You may think you accomplish your
task expeditiously and well. but after
It is done, there is always someone to
tell you Of a better way.
Doctors are now prescribing whisky
as an antidote for poison ivy. There
seems, however. to be no antidote for
poison contained in whisky.
When returning from a vacation, a
Is expected to lie almost as much
about the improved condition Of his
health as about the fish he caught.
When q Spin gets lonesome. ii
should be some consolation no her to
that there isn't a mar in the
world who has the right to beat her.
The only breaks In the m%onotony OF
a model married mans life are those
caused by death and the seasons
from peas to corn and beans
The old pioneers endured a great deal.
For instance there was frequently but
mi room in the house; no chance to
complain about sieepins in the hottest !,
Z NN4.E. 800 Esll
When a man is going wrong. his
dislike to speak to him about
1t. Blu the devil has no hesitancy IN
to him" when the time
comes
Every man q lot OF old clothes
to go hunting In. but the only hunting
ever does ID for the clothes, only to
that his wife has given them
away.
Thu mar who calls on you In your
ofdce with a letter Of introduction. II
often az big q fakir as the men who
delivers a street lecture, and sells eye
It Is always difncult to do business
with q mar who Is fifty or q 100 miles
away. for the reason thai 1t is easier
lie by telephone or telegraph than !
70 q mans face.