davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30
ANayaI EXpOSuTe -

The reviving Of some old stories con-
corning the battle ships Oregon. Massa-
ohusetts. Indiana, Iowa. Kentucky, and
Kearsarge has furnished the publication
known as 1.-THE Navy material for a
sensational editorial which must be inter-
esting 10 the Secretary Of the Navy That
official and the President are the two
honorary members Of the Navy League.
Of which Gen. Horace Porter Is the
president and The Navy" the monthly
organ. It is pointed out in this critical
essay that the six battle ships which have
been looked upon with pride as the finest
examples Of war ship design and con-
struction Of their time are really vulner-
able hulks. They have what is called
soft ends, that is, places at bow and
stern which are not as well protected
by armor as are other parts Of the ship
and which may be easily perforated by
the shells Of an enemy. The same ships
are described as having too much open
space in the armor around the guns, both
those mounted in turrets and those in
the classmates. with the alleged result
that there IS danger that hostile gunners
may put projectlles through these spaces
and so reach the interior Of the ship.
The rebuke conveyed is that while the
government is going on building such de-
fective vessels. the attention Of the rest
Of the world was invited to the situation
by exhibiting the ships named al Hamp-
ton Roads. where the foreigners. It is
apprehended must have observed their
deplorable condition with appreciation.
As a matter OF fact, the foreigners have
long known all they want to know re-
garding the vulnerability Of our ships.
That has been the business of some Of
their representatives, in this country, of
course. and the congregation Of ships at
Hampton Roads probably led to no new
discoveries. What would appear to be
more shocking. indeed. is this exposure
Of war ship defects in the publication
of the Navy League Of course. its pur-
pose is indicated in the final paragraph.
in which Secretary Metcalf, one Of the
two honorary members Of the League. is
taken severely to task for alleged lack
u 4uleItSl III lUilUNlUB up secretary
Bonaparte's plan to reorganize the ad-
ministration machinery of the Navy De-
partment. II is safe TO say that no such
radical change as that which would in
troduce a naval general staff in the
departmental mechanism would have
saved the navy from whatever defects
may exist and il is a good sign that
Secretary Metcalf has not chosen to do
violence to the system. the merits or
faults of which he has had small OBJ
portunity to understand.
It might be remarked. incidentally. that
Secretary Metcalf could very well look
into the personnel of the Navy Depart-
ment and find out how and why there
has been such an advertisement Of naval
defects. Such a disclosure in a quarter
which pretends TO have sen1i-official sus-
tenance is apt to do harm to the service
in Congress, where authoritative infor-
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30
MUST HAVE PROTECTION.
Leading" Western Citizens Need to
BE Shielded from Government.

From The Springfield Republican.
The uprising in the West against the
Roosevelt public policy is what every
one should have expected. Leading citi-
zens must have some protection. In time
they are sure TO revolt against an admin
istration that deals with them in the style
indicated by this dispatch from Denver.
A special grand jury closed its session this after
noon and reported to Judge Lewis about serenity in
dictments against men prominent in Colorado, Wyo-
ming, Nebraska, New Mexico Utah. Nevada Wis
consin. and Missouri, principally for alleged coal
and timber land frauds
What is the use Of being a prominent"
citizen if grand juries are to perform in
that way? A man no sooner makes his
mark than he is called upon TO explain
why he stole the governments land. It's
embarrassing TO our best society in the
West. and creates also popular disrespect
for those who succeed in life. II the Den
yer convention does not emphasize this
point as il should be, it will have met in
vain
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30
Three views of Philippine policy


Following Secretary Taft's able defense
Of our colonial policy on atruistic
grounds. in his Decoration Day speech
at St Louis, Mr. Bryan renews his oppo-
sition to that policy in the Reader, pre-
senting political objections to it. while
Senator Beverldge, in the same magazine
gives some frankly imperialstic and mill
| itary reasons for territorial expansion
beyond the seas. Mr.. Bryan sees in our
Cuban policy a precedent which he
thinks should be applied 10 the Philippine
problem. He would have US treat the
Filipinos as we have treated the Cubans
and make them al once a pledge of in
dependence. the pledge to be fulfilled
when a stable government is established"
| That he says, is the only American plan.
TT recognizes the principles of our gov
eminent. is in harmony with the wishes
Of the Filipinos, is justified by their ca
pacity. and is consistent with our COM
mercial interests"
Senator Beverage bluntly declares that
we have given the Ffipinos too much
self-government, and he strongly disap-
proves going too fast in crowding New
England's self-government down the
Threats of Malays who are not prepared
20 digest it, The policy Of this country,
however. has been continually to increase
the measure Of self-government extended
to the Filipin0s. and IN pursuance Of this
policy elections will be held in July for
the first. Philippine assembly. Secretary
Taft has often stated that whenever the
FiIipinos are able 10 govern themselves
we should withdraw from the islands.
though he has recently expressed the be-
lief that they would prefer to retain some
such relationship with the United States
as Canada has with Great Britain. It
will be seen that the difference Of opinion
between Mr.. Bryan and Secretary Taft
respecting our future Philippine policy is
not so great as the gulf between the
views OF Mr.. Bryan and Senator Bev-
eridge
The question Of Filipino independence Is
not altogether academic. for II may be
preeipitated by the new Philippine assem-
bly,, which meets in October In his St
Louis speech, Mr.. Taft predicted that the
majority of the newly elected members
Of the assembly would declare in favor
Of immediate independence" He thought
this would be quite natural but hoped
that, after having given vent 10 their
feelings on this subject. and having pre-
scented a respectful petition 20 Congress
thereon, they would settle down 20 busl-
ness Of more pressing practical conse-
quence. It may be surmised that one Of
the principal objects Of Mr. Taft's APP
preaching visit 70 the Philippines will be
10 direct the expected ebUllition Of senti-
ment for independence into harmless
channels and If he gets off with a re
spectful petition 10 Congress" ne may
count himself lucky. There isn't any
question about the fate Of such a petit
ton at the Capitol. with our Cuban ex-
perience fresh In the minds Of members
Of Congress-
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

Minister Lee. at Guatemala City, says
that the situation at Salvador is dis
quieting and that both Guatemala and
Salvador are sending troops to the from
tier
1t is evident that the greatest need Of
the Central American States is men
men big enough and able enough TO unite
the varied interests. and honest enough
to resist the temptations offered, we are
sorry to say, altogether too often by
syndicates Of American capitalists and
others who are eager 70 support any
faction from whom valuable
may be gained.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30
INSPIRED BY THE HERALD.

Atlanta Constitution: The Washington
Herald remarks that "a strong man IS
needed In San Francisco" The strong
man has predominated heretofore.
Atlanta Journal: The Washington Her
alb viii please observe that In South
Georgia. where they are raised. they are
neither peanuts nor COOLERS, but bear the
classic name Of pindars.
Rochester Herald: The washington Her
aid mentions the fact that Tom Taggart
is unusually quiet these days. The quiet
ness which surrounds Tom is so thick
that il can be stirred into fancy curlycues
with q spoon. It much becomes him. too.
Chattanooga Star. The Washington
Herald tells a solemn truth in this para
graph: The Democrats will have 20 act
differently if they ever expect 90 elect a
President, says a contemporary. They
do act differently practically every one
Of them
Bristol tTennD Herald-Courier: - cor
respondent Of the New York World de-
scribes a Republican as one who never
fred on the United States nag and de
MES that there is any other definition. "
says The Washington Herald. Then there
are thousands Of men in the South who
haven't got their politics on straight
Cleveland Plain Dealer: May Irwin.
Lulu CHASER. Ellen Terry! Is this an
suspicious season for the wedding Of aC-
tresses2 o." asks a Denver contemporary.
Read your answer in the stars. Wash
inEtOn Herald. And the stars seem to be
Of one opinion. May Irwin and Ellen
Terry both profess to be proud of their
husbands. But. Of course, Lulu CHASER
prefers Herr.
Charlotte Observer: The Washington
Herald thinks that because the Observer.
while standing by the absolutely conclu-
sive evidence that \. J. was born in
North Carolina, suggests that he may
have been only a North Carolina myth
and that there was no such President. the
Observer dies hard" Our contemporary
will never be more mistaken. It needs to
get its mortuary information straighter.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30
A LITTLE NONSENSE.
EXPERIMENTS.

Johnny peeped into gun. He, il seems,
was goaded
BY wish 10 ascertain If the gun was
loaded
II was.
Freddy poked a pinwheel twice. Also he
did linger
To find out If pinwheels will burn a fell
lows finger.
Always
Tommy blew into a bomb; did # we'll and
sllckly
Wished TO learn If lighted bombs go off
very quickly.
Invariably.
Archibald a cannon lit. Archibald then
busted,
Just 10 see IL he could sneak ere the
cannon busted.
He couldn't.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30
The Order of the Dragon.

What is this order Of the Dragon I
hear so much about?" said a well-knowu
official to a young army officer who was
with the famous Ninth Infantry at Pekin
during the Boxer uprising. The lieuten-
ant enlightened his friend with the in
formation that the order Of the Dragon
was established by the commissioned Off
GERS Of the American army at Pekin in
1900. The members are commissioned Off
GERS Of the army and navy who
served in China between certain dates
officers Of other armies and navies TAX
ing part in the campaign were invited to
become honorary members. and a great
many made application for such member
ship.
The society is similar in many respects
to the order Of the Cincinnati, founded
by American and French officers at the
close of hostilities in the War Of the
Revolution The object of its formation
was to perpetuate the mutual friendships
formed by various officers of the different
armies which went to Pekin seven
years ago.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30
BREAKFAST TABLE CHAT.
From the Detroit Free Press
THE SUMNER ARGUMENT.

A problem of wedlock
That never IS settled.
That makes father mad,
And that gets mother ncttled,
II comes up each year
At the summer resort.
Who'll clean the Gsl
That father has caught?
Mother says that she won't,
Father says that she should:
Il is clearly her task.
And is so understood.
II I catch the fish,
And ! head EN- and tail EN-.
It's really your duty
To dig in and scale en-"
To this mother says.
in a positive way,
when / clean your fish,
II viii be Q cold day.
You have all the fun.
When you angle and hook EN-.
I'm doing enough
II I'm willing 10 COOK EN-.
You're wrong" declares father,
You sW0Te 10 obey,
Il was one Of your VOWS
On your glad wedding day
True. replies mother,
IN bow 10 your wish.
When the minister says
That I swOre 10 clean fish"
Oh, endless the worry,
And CeaseiesS the row;
The summer is here.
They ere arguing now.
They want 90 decide,
And the problem is great:
Should ma clean the fish,
II pa digs the b9it7
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30
SUMNER REsoRTER's SONNET.

l met the man who came up yesterday
In what strikes me as a peculiar way:
It's very strange sometimes how people
meet.
I saw him standing near the hardware
store.
As I came from the post-ofice next
door.
Somehow I dropped my 'kerchief on
the street
And then heard him running after
me-
He whistled but I didn't look to see.
And when ne touched my arm. l jumped
in fright,
You dropped your handkerchief" he
softly said.
May I walk with you?" then I dropped
my head.
I couldn't slam him. he was so polite.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30
1t May BE Law, but Isn't Practice.

From the Richmond News Leader
Public sentiment. law and custom alike.
require that before assuming the awful
responsibility Of taking a human life a
man is required TO convince himself that
the provocation exists and is adequate.
II the law is. however. that on the mere
statement of woman that she has been
subjected TO indignities. insult, or wrong.
regardless Of circumstances and without
further inquiry her relative may so forth
and kill with the assumption ia his favor
that he is made insane by what is told
him. the law should be changed. Pros
pective members OF the legislature should
begin to give the matter their attention
Immediately and at the next session the
statutes should be so amended as to pro-
vide against conditions threatening 10
nullify practically cur laws against MIR
der
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

rom the Louisville Courier-Journal.

From the Louisville Courier-Journal.
From the number of nature-faking
stories recently published by our contem-
poraries, it is evident that there is a
S,Wo,OC0 conspiracy to get President
Roosevelt into a controversy that will
prevent him from shaping the course Of
Republican events between now and 1908.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30
ARE YOU GOING AWAY ?

Subscribers who leave the city
temporarily should have The
Washington Herald mailed TO
them, Addresses viii be changed
as often as requested. You can
not keep fully informed about
affairs in Washington unless
your paper fellows you.
Before leaving, mail or tele-
phone your address 10 this Of
fee.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30
Figth Avenue Hotel to Go.

rhkA avenue AlDttA 10 10
The Fifth Avenue Hotel one Of the
most famous hostelries in the country, is
to disappear before the march Of progress
in New York Some time next spring
the demolition Of the OLD hotel is to be-
sin, and on May l contractors will com
mence the erection Of a twenty-five story
office building on the site Il has occupied
SO many years. The lease held by the pres
eut IesGees viii expire on the date named.
The block which is occupied Jointly by
the Fifth Avenue Hotel and the Madison
Square Theater is regarded as one Of the
most valuable IN New York. conservative
business men estimating that &c is now
worJh about 100000. Seven years ago.
in the course Of a settlement of the Amos
Z. Emo estate. it was sold for SAP 900.
and that was considered very low fig
ure.
Because Of its location and the histori-
cal interest attached to il. the Old hotel
mas enjoyed a patronage of which many
OF the palatial hostelries farther up
Broadway and Fifth avenue might be
proud II has long been famous rs .head-
quarters for Republican politicians. and
IL was in its rooms and corridors that
the movement to nominate Grant for the
Presidency had its origin. It's Amen
Corner" is known ali over the country.
Easy Boss Plat made hif headquar-
tiers under its hOspitable roof for many
years. and ever since the birth of the Re
publican party the main offices of its
New York State committee have been
there The present King Of England, then
the Prince Of Wales, was guest Of the
Fifth Avenue in the early Sos The hotel
was erected originally in 1859. when Mad
ison Square was a rocky pasture. and the
business part Of New York was all below
Blocker street Prior to that time the
site had been occupied many years by
famous road house.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30
Money in Il nj SO Cents.

From the Hartford Times
Boston has the best behaved gas mo-
nopoly in the country. Eighty cents IS
likely to be the prevailing rate for gas in
all our large cities within a few years.
II Is a very profitable business even at
that low rate
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30
In Ambush.

"Oh. cried the girl In the auto do stop
and let US examine yon curious ferns
But the chauffeur only put on extra
speed
Them" lie explained. lis the local
C0Hstable's WHISPERS"
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30
A Heart-interest Drama.

Jack, I am going away"
Going away. Madge?'
Yes, going away. But. before I 90,
l have something to say TO you"
Something to say to me, little wife?'
Yes. something to sly 10 you. Don't
send ne any poker stories in lieu Of the
weekly remittance Thatu be about all.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30
Look 1t In.

From BFyan's Conmoner.
The New York Mail says that Mr.. John
Temple Graves assertion that para
grapher can not enter heaven is not
founded on Matthew xix:24 Yes. we've
read it. but you'll have to look it up for
yourself, so get a hump on you.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

Although everything in the world is
said to have a use, the Montgomery Ad-
vertiser fails 10 find any good use for
the mosquito. Well. he furnishes a fruit
full topic for editorial illusions, doesn't
hn7
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

Japan should be careful about cap
turing the Philippine Is.ands. We warn
that country right now that We will
not take them back without a fight.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30
With the Fncts Left Ont.

From the Milwaukee Sentinel
Mr.. Bryan's definition Of Democracy
pleasantly recalls the radical students
celebrated description Of the lobster as
"a red fish that walks backward -
whereas a lobster is not fish. is not red,
and does net walk backward.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

From the New YORK EFeuiug Post
Southern judges and juries might ex-
press their enthusiasm by bestowing on
the accused. after the customary aCquit-
tai. the degree of L. L. D., or doctor Of
the unwritten law.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

say ma, can I go out swimming this
afternoon
No. Harry the water is too cold yet"
no. it amt either was in this
morning
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

She's an expensive thing, my boy. Do
you think you can support her2'
IN DO nay best. SIR"
And III help out by standing from
under by easy stages"
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

A Philadelphia man claims that Santos
DumOnt stole his airship ideas II they
are the ones with which Santos has been
experimenting lately, the Philadelphia
ought to be glad of Il.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30
The Gradunfe-

Beyond the Alps lies Italyl
But naught ne cares,
For he is busy now, you see,
Collecting fares.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30
Curiosity.

Looks like a question mark" said the
fish, which was inspecting the hook
Then there's a catch about it," de-
clared his pal
We'll. 1 guess III bite"
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

Why should any Of our contemporaries
object 70 oyster Bay as a ft and
proper name for the Presidents summer
home? Has not the oyster been officially
designated a wild animal?
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

What viii happen when women ruIey'
Among other things, Wen have elbow
sleeve diplomacy
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

A writer in a New York weekly Is tell
ing an anxious public why War Is
He'll" This sort of thing incidentally
demonstrates why certain magazine read
ing is also.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

There are two breweries in Houston
says the Post Of that city. Then words
fail Il. verbose and b0astful as IL usually
IS.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

The Hartford Times finds fault with
those people who designate Brownsville
as lying on the Mexican border.
Wherever it. is, however, recent events
prove that It is great town for being
lied about
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

Anyhow, the discovery Of that pistol
in Mr. Roosevelts hip pocket win estop
all future butters-in from claiming that
they didn't know the President was
lnaaad-
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

Mr.. on-Thompson-T Thompson Seton
&C. says ne once heard chipmunk
sing for eleven consecutive minutes. Look
out now for another broadside against
nature takers in some monthly screamer.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

The Anderson IS. c. InteIligencer is
discussing the problem. How Can an
Editor Purchase an Automobile" That
is an easy problem compared with the
one that comes after: How can he pay
for repairs after he gets it?
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

An effort is being made to reconcile the
Castellanes by trying the case all over
again a plea of former jeopardy upon
the part of the countess doubtless would
be sustained.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

nation against the navy is good material
for it's critics. the opponents OF more
ships and Of personnel legislation.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

Those abominabla, greasy dollar bills
are here 10 stay" says the Birmingham
Ledger In spite Of their faults, however,
they viii be an Improvement over the
old kind If they are more particular about
staying than going.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

Mrs. Potter Palmer refused King Peter
of Servia 20 marry the Earl of Munster
1t is said now. Good chance here for a
pupster to work off something about
Munster and monster.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

Puck thinks we may have Charlie
Bears" in the next Presidential campaign.
However that may be. there is no sort
Of demand for any more Divine Right
Baers i'm this country; the one We now
have is one too many.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

The man who left a will instracting his
executors 10 have him nodded into a
paving brick before burial doubtless was
a man of good intentions
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

The Chattanooga Times chdes the
Nashville American for cartOoning Gov
Taylor as playing a fiddle with the bow
in his right hand instead of the left. as is
the Senator's invariabie rule. Neverthe-
less, it always has been our idea that the
gentleman was right handy with his
instrument.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

Although an oyster Is officially a wild
animal. we have frequently seen little
dears kill them by biting them In the
neck
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

DR.. Wiley fixes the value OF a baby at
$1,000. That is. perhaps, a fair average,
but il must be admitted that the mar
ket is subject % violent fluctuations.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

Gov. Hughes has been made a doctor
Of laws, Notwithstanding the fact that
his operation upon the two-cent-a-mile
bill proved fatal to the patient
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30

Take a chance, young man. advises
a philosopher. All right; anything bat
Chance Day.
The Washington herald., 1907-06-30
MEN AND THINGS.
HitchcocIs Not Going West.

First Assistant Postmaster General
Frank A. Hitchcock is not going to Ohio,
and thence to the Pacific Coast In the near
future. He doesn't like 10 go anywhere
these days because the newspapers insist
that his journeys partake altogether too
much Of the nature Of political inyest-
cations, conducted with a view 10 ascer-
tanning just what the administration may
expect in the way Of delegates from vari-
Gus States to the natiopal convention
next year. To be quite serious about the
matter. he undoubtedly does give atten-
ton 10 postal business on his tours, but
there can be no question that he also de-
votes considerable effort to obtaining ac-
curate information concerning political
conditions. When he was in the South
recently he conferred with party workers,
particularly those who hold Federal
Offices. at practically every place he Wis
tied. Since the appointment Of postmas-
ters Is wholly political, with some occa-
sional exceptions. Mr. Hitchcock Is, Of
course, quite justified in saying that his
talks with the Southern Republicans. who
have more or less say in the making
Of such appointments, related TO official
business. Although not a member Of the
so-called tennis Cabinet. Hitchcock is
close to the President. and is trusted ard
highly esteemed by the administration
generally. 1t is quite probable that
higher honors than any he has yet en-
joyed are in store for him.