The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1907-09-26

Raiiiesnakes oa Toast Was
the Cowboys Order
BUT HE MET WITH HIS MATCH

~" N Att ttN# HN W
The Promptness With Which The
Tough Waiter Served the Dish Took
the Terror's Nerve Away-The Re.
past and the Final Request
Away back in 1916 a man named
Turpn established a restaurant in
Yuma, and among Turpin's original
employees was a waiter named Job
Straight, who could shoot with great
precision, play draw poker with un-
varying success and pack eighteen
plates OF miscellaneous grub upon one
bare arm at one time. He could exc
cute all the prevailing melodies either
on piano or guitar and he possessed
the most tremendous baritone voice
ever heard in Arizona. Why, men some
times went to Turpin's just to hear Joe
deliver gasronomic orders No per
feet description can be given Of that
voice, however. except to say that at
times It really did make things clatter
Once a fresh young cowboy from
near Gila Bend entered Turpm's for a
Christmas dinner who took a startling
concoction as an appetizer and then
dropped thud-llke at table and rough
" shouted to Straight:
"say. there, Badly! Bring me some
grubg'
Job was at first appalled,; but, recov-
ering his reserve limit Of equanimity-
he brushed an imaginary breadcrumb
from the frescoed tablecloth and
whisked bill Of fare from the yarIe-
gated castor and placed II before the
new young terror Of the Bend
"Take 1t awayl' cried the latter IN
tones that could give straights ordi-
nary, everyday baritone a castle and
checkmate It in five moves. Il don't
want to read your darned old tract.
/ don't care a darn who came into the
world to save sinners. Bring me some
grub-g-r-u-b! Grub! Grub Grubw
"What do you want9"
"Rattlesnakes on toastl And 4 want
you to hump yourseIfw
whats that7"
ave given my order, you baldheaded
old cigar store sign, and want you to
get a move on yourself, p. d. q. Rattle
enakes on toastw
"Rattlesnakes on toastg' cried Job to
the cook in accents that would have
paralyzed Carl Formes had that old
basso profundo been living and heard
them.
Rattlesnakes on toastP' was the re-
verberating response from the cook
upon receiving the order.
There were a dozen or more people in
the restaurant, and their eyes We're al
once turned on the young person from
the Bond and the infuriated waiter
In the meantime the cook bad taker
big catfish and cut it into four strips
cnd rolled these strips in batter. Sc
I that they much resembled the Wand or
dered ena eeter nlac'rg tom r ~
frying pan lie stuck his head out OF tbs
kitchen and shouted to Job.
"You want them rattlers rare or wei
doneY
The waiter repeated the interrogation
In a cyclonic way. and the terror re
piled IN rs violent a tone and manner
as he could command well done, witt
plenty Of gravy and Chill Colorado"
And then Job thundcred to the cook:
"Well done. with plenty Of Chill Colo
rado. hot as ~. and moccasin gray,
on the side and brochettes of SAINT
crane Iiyers and Gila monster lights9
There was an instantaneously deal
silence in that restaurant, and all eve
were again east upon the terror an
the waiter. The former turned asheI
pale and began to weaken perceptibl5
while Job gazed at bis victim.
.Aaybe sou don't think we can sery
all the market affords" muttered Jol
"Aiaybe YOU don't Ike moccasin gray
or brochettes n In mode. Maybe SO
amt hungry
"sayi You've got mel amt hungry
50 help me. ! couldn't eat a single har
boiled egg. countermand that durne
order, old man, and Ill pay all G.
penses and set 'em up as long as an!
body can drink. Beg pardon, gentli
men, all Ay first attempt to be a te
ror-pardon me, gentlemen. It's 10
lastg'
And then he handed lis revolver
} Job and added:
''Take that pistol old man, as
present and promise me that the ne
time any burned fool comes In he
and calls for rattlesnakes on toa