davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The free lance. (Fredericksburg, Va.) 1885-1926, 1907-11-26

A critic is a man who eouldn't have
done Il himself.
The free lance. (Fredericksburg, Va.) 1885-1926, 1907-11-26
RIPANS.

There ls scarcely any condition OF
Ill health that is NOT benefited by the
occasional use of 8 RIPANS Tabule.
For sale by druggists. The Five
cent packet is enough for an ordt
nary occasion. The family bottle, %
cents, contains Q supply for q year.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
ROMANCE or NAVAL GRAFT.
Interesting History Of . snip ans
Yacht Called porothsa.

Among the vessels assigned to the
,,yai militia is one with q history
7, seems that many years ago. wheh
IL was the custom OF the insurance ui'
derwriters to put up ut auction ''S
sells that had been long overdue anu
NOT heard from. young apprentice
in philadelphia happesed to attehu
one of these auctions at which iarso
shin named the Dorothea was put up
for sale.
The vessel had taken aboard yer!
valuable cargo. which would so win
the shin to the successful bidder, hut
the very fact that the property was
so valuable had kept the underwriters
from selling the craft until long ai'er
1t had become generally believed tha'
she was a total wreck
Consequently the auctioneer crieu
the good ship Dorothea many uhies
without getting bid. Finally the
young apprentice jokingly bid five dol
lars, as nobody would bid higher, the
vessel and her cargo were knocked
down to him. Imagine the astonish'
ment of the maritime world when tho
Dorothea was reported sailing into
Delaware bay.
The apprentice sold his prize for
enough 10 start him in business. and
for years the house thus formed was
one of the leaders in enterprise and re-
sources in the Quaker city. But AT
all times the head OF the firm and
his family successors made a point
of owning and operating n ship named
the Dorothea. which name also Was
given the oldest daughter in each
succeeding generation.
Shortly before the Spanish war, how
ever, the third head OF the house was
in failing health, and the only hope
OF saving his life. he was advised, was
TO live at sea. Accordingly he gave
an order to the Cramps for a large
and luXuriously appointed yacht, to
be called the Doruthea. OF course. and
no expense was spared In her construc.
ton and equipment.
Unfortunately. death came TO the
owner before his yacht was finally
finished and the government paid a
fancy price for the Dorothea early In
1898.
With the close OF the war there
was no purely naval duty for which
the Dorothea was fitted. and yet the
government did not wish to sell her
because there was no possibility OF
getting a price for her anything like
what she had cost. she was accord.
ingly laid up at the League Island
navy yard until. says the Chicago
Chronicle. the Illinois Naval reserves
succeeded in convincing the navy de.
partment that they were entitled to
her
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
No Chance for "uneIe."

Mr.. Archibald" said the kind old
landlady. didn't hear you say that
you always soaked your overcoat eN'
cry spring to keep germs out OF 1t?
You certainly did. ma'am. chuckled
the Young man. who was in the habit
Of putting his oyercoat up for the
price of straw hat.
We'll. you won't have TO worry
over the germs this season
Think not?"
NO. indeed. I thought about soak
ing the overcoat and | reached the CON
clusion that Il was too mild TO kill the
germs. so just put 1t into the wash
boiler and boiled II"
And the dear old lady Is still won.
dering why the young man changed
his boarding house so suddenly.-Chi'
cago News.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
HE Also WAS 4 COLLECTION.
Cleveland Artist Came Back with
Counter Proposition.

A local newspaper artist got let
ter one day from man over In IN
diana who said he was making col,
lection of sketches. says the Cleveland
Plain Dealer Il have drawings from
well known newspaper artists In near
ly every state in the union." the In
diana man wrote. but ! haye none
from Ohio. have seen some OF your
work and think It is good. II you
will send me some little sketch Tor my
collection shall have 1t framed,
The artist noticed from the letter
head that the Indiana man was con
pected with bank in one of the small
towns in the state of literature. That
gave him a hunch. and he wrote back
as follows:
81 am making collection OF ten
dollar bills. ! haven't secured speci'
mems from every state in the union.
hut | have several tens and Few
twenties. and am particularly anN'
ious TO have a ten dollar bill from
Indiana. notice that you are EN-
ployed in a place where ten dollar
bills are kept. and II you send me
on. for my collection | shall be glad
TO have 1t framed"
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
LONELY pouoHERTY ISLAND.
No Landing Ever Made There. and
Sighted Only Twice in a Century.

Which is the lonelIest. most desc
late and most inaccessible island on
the face OF the globe? Many people
would doubtless plump for one OF the
Crozcts. which We're recently brought
into notice owing TO the wreck there
on Of the Norwegian exploring ship
Catherine. and the subsequent res.
cue of the castaway crew By the Tura.
kina. British steamer DISPATCHED
from Cape Town for that purpose.
But Hog island. the westernmost
Of the group and the one whereon the
wrecked men spent most OF their time.
is by no means an undesirable place
OF residence. says Persons Weekly.
aboundlng as II does in hares aud rab.
bits. penguins. albatrosses and sea ele-
phant.
Heard island. In the same seas. is
far more isolated. as well as more bar.
ron: but It possesses. as does Hog
o shelter hut for castaways. and is Wis.
tied by whalers occasionally So too
is South Georgia, but il has no shell
ter hut, and as It is right out of the
track Of shipping and one unlucky
enough to be cast away thereon would
stand very poor chance of ever get.
ting of alive
Bouvet island. in the same seas. is
visited even more rarely. and on ,he
last occasion when ship touched
there five corpses We're found frozen
on the beach. grim mementos Of some
unrecorded tragedy Of th4 sea. Pos.
session island. in its tur.. Is still
lonelier and rnore inhospitable than
Bouyet
Eut probably the palm in this direc.
tion must be ascribed to Doueherty IA.
land. on which, as far as is known, no
landing has ever yet been effected II
has only been sighted twice In cen.
turT and is officially described in TN.
admiralty sailing directions as "the
most remote and isolated spot on
earth"
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
BLACK, ITCHING SPOTS ON FACE.
Physician Called II Eczema in Worst
Form-Patient Oespaired OF Cure
Cuticura Remedies Cured Her.

About four years ago | was affiict.
ed with black splotches all over my
face and Il few covering my body,
which produced severe Itching irri-
tation. and which caused me great
deal OF suffering, to such an extent
that was forced TO call in two of the
leading physicians OF . After
thorough examination OF the dreaded
complaint they announced It TO be
skin eczema in the worst form. Their
treatment did me no good. FINALLY |
became despondent and decided TO dis
continue their services. Ny husband
purchased a single set OF the Cuticura
Remedies. which entirely stopped the
breaking out. continued the use Of
the Cuticura Remedies for six months,
and after that every splotch was en-
tirely gone. have not felt symptom
Of the eczema since. which was three
years ago. Mrs, Lizzie Z. SledGe. $40
Jones Ave. Selma, Ala, Oct. IS. 1905.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
MRS. SADIE ABBOTT

Women for the most part spend
their lives at home, and IL IL these
women who are willing and ambitious
that their homes shall be kept neat
and pretty. their children well dressed
and tidy. who do their own cooking,
sweeping, dusting and often washing,
ironing and sewing for the entire
family. who call for our sympathy.
Truly the work OF such woman
is never done" and Is IL any wonder
that she breaks down Mt the end of
few years. the back begins TO ache.
there Is n displacement, Inflammation
or liberation OF the abdominal organs.
n female weakness is brought on. and
the struggle OF that wife and mother
TO continue her duties is pitiful.
Lydia 2. Pinkham's Vegetable
Compound, made from native roots
and herbs. is the exact medicine
woman needs whose strength Is over
taxed. II keeps the feminine organs
in n strong and healthy condition.
In preparing for childbirth and re-
cuperating thcrefrom it Is most eff
cient. 1t carries n woman safely
through the change OF life and in
making her strong and well assists
her to be n good wife and mother.
Mrs. Sadie Abbott, of Jeanncttc,
Pa. writes
Dear Mrs Pinkham-
II suffered severely with pain every
month and also n pain in my left side. My
doctor prescribed for me but did me no
good; n friend advised Lydia +. Pinkham's
Vegetable Compound and ! wrote you in
regard to my condition. followed your
ADVICE and am n perfectly well woman. The
pains have all disappeared and ! cannot
recommend your medicine too highly"
.dia e RiahhaAIs Ye1eAaAle C0A
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
500 Reward, 500.

The readers Of this paper -lll ~ plreei 70 left
hAE there .si least one dreaded d,eAse th.t science
"a be@a able 20 10 all its stages sni that 10
.aE.frl. Han. CAtArrh Cure 10 the only positive
sufs n1E knJsn to the medical fraternity tstafth
helag c1attitutiJn4l disease requires eohsiita'
z3uAi trratmraL HAif. CAtArrh Lnfs 10 taken 10
s-uaIy acting directly upun the blood aud nueog.
tgrfaCss 1f the system, thereby iestroTln. The
1uniaiiJn q the disease. and gtying the patient
grrnsth bJ Bulliias up the c1usltutiun Ani Assst.
~ nature Ia tyinE It, rJrk. The proprietor, have
much faith IN its curative power. that they Offer
)ae Hundred Dollar. for any case that Il fa.!s 10
sarc. Srui tot list nf tcs'itnDuiAl'
Aiirsss 2. J CHENEY CO., Toledo, o.
sold by al D-gEslst-. sc.
Taxa Hans Family Pul. fpr constipation.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
SYMPATHY FOR THE FISH.
Upton sIn7ISir's Amazing Parable on
Charity Of the Ri;h.

Upton Sinclair. in an address before
body OF Chicago Socialists. said OF
charity:
THE average charity. the charity OF
the rich. seems rather futile 10 me.
The rich oppress the poor enormously.
then they help them slightly. 1t is
like the young lady angler.
why said man to this young
lady. do you always carry bottle OF
linIment with you on your fishi-S eI.
cursions?
She sighed.
"T am sorry.' she said plaintively,
for the poor little fish. And so. when
take one of the hook, always rub
its cut mouth with some liniment'
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21

Sheer white goods, in fact, any hne
wash goods when new. owe mneh Oh
heir attractiyeucss TO the way they
ire Iaundered, this being done In
manner to enhance their textile beau
v. Home laundering would be equal
y satisfactory II proper attention was
:iyeu to starching. the first essential
icing good Starch, which has sufficient
trcngth to stiIen. without thickenins
he goods. Try Defiance Starch and
fou will be pleasantly surprised at the
improved appearance OF your work.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
vouId Take wha. They Had.

A gentleman purchased at a post
,r,ce a large quantity OF stamped en-
,elopes, newspaper wrappers ana o'n'
e postal requisites.
Finding them somewhat difficult 10
AIRY. he asked one OF the counter
Jerks n he could supply him with /"
,msll quantity of string
We are not permitted by the ue'
,artment to supply string was the
'eply. :.
Then give me a bit OF red tape
vas the sarcastic retort.
The string was supplied.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21

The extraordinary popularity OF hne
white goods this summer makes the
cboic. OF Starch matter OF great I'm.
ro,tance. Defiance Starch. being free
rom all injurious chemicals. is the
only one which is safe to use on hne
fabrics. Its great strength as stincner
makes half the usual quantity OF Starch
necessary. with tho result OF perfect
anIsh. equal to that when the goods
were new.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
Quaker VIII.

A Quaker riding in carriage with
1 fashionable woman decked with
,rofusion OF iewelry. as a substitute
perhaps. for her scantiness OF clothes.
leard her complaining OF the cold.
Shiyering In her lace bonnet and
shawl. she exclaimed. What shall |
10 TO get warm
81 really don't know" replied the
Quaker solcmnly. unless thou put on
mother breastpin. Sunday Maga'
line.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
A CAPABLE Woman.

There is no place filled by man,
remarked Mrs. Strongmind. that
woman cannot fill.
III wouldn't be so bad" rejoined her
husband, III she would only let II go
at that. | saw one today who was hil'
ing two mems places.
"Where?" queried Mrs. 5,
"In a street car" answered the
wretch as he made hurried exit from
the room.-Chicago News,
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
Nothina Doing.

.I have a little book here that
think will interest you" said the
agent, as he sat down on the farm
house porch to rest. 1T is entitled
How TO Be Your own Lawyer.
Reckon don't want no sich 1901
book ez that" replied the old farmer
''They amt no sense In man larnin
how { rob hisself. by grass!"-Chtcago
News
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21

,at well. and finally became eI.pp'v1 pp,.l
md bent over with rheumatism. poah ;
Kidney Pills brough, quick reIet' anu ,o
= time cured me. Though | lost W
,ornJs now weigh 200. more than
ever before ,ox
sold by all dealers. 50 cents poS'
1rrter. .Mllburn Co. Bufralo. ~ l.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
Tastes Just the Same.

"You say you were in the saloon az
the time OF the assault referred 10 IN
the complaint" asked the lawyer.
Il was. sir"
Did you take cognizance OF the par
keeper OF the time2"
Il don't know what he called It, but
l took what the rest did. June LIP
pincotts.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
vv1,evvl

~Reaiiy-er-I'm afraid yea evee.
heard what I--er-said about yoAS
s,smmercd the gossip who had beea
causht rcdhanded. Perhaps I-er-
was a bit too severe--
"oh. no." replied the other woman.
"you weren't nearly - severe ~ you
would have been II you knew what !
think OF you"
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
The Web Of Life.

Life is the daily web OF character
". unconsciously weave. Our thoughts.
imaginations. purpose. motives. love.
will. are the under threads; and the
passing moment is the suttle. swiftly.
ceaselessly, relentiessly. weaving
those threads into web. and that
U.b ia life.-S. ID. Gordon.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21

was lurklns ih '
system for years.
had torturing pain
in. the side ana
back and the urine !,
was dark and fuli
OF sediment. l was
racked with pain
day and night
could not sleep or
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21

No man that imparteth his Joys to
bis friend. but he joyeth the more;
and no man that imparteth his griefs
20 his friend. but he grieveth the less.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
Willinu 10 Reason.

"Ot course declared the pretty
widow. Il am inconsolable."
Naturally"
However. as you know. was never
/ fanatic on any point"
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
pro,nInsnt Roll.

Miss Sue Brette-What sort OF :
role did you have In that last piece:
Foote Lighte-Why. ! had ron .,
stage money as big as good-sized ro''
OF carpet.-Yonkers Statesman.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
Obvious.

Goodnight" she sighed. and yet once
more
Goodnight" He cried "Adieu'
The parlor clock struck l before
The flight of time struck two.
Catholic Standard and Times.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
rhs Breakdown Sort.

"Jingley seems to be very fond OF
walking"
Not at all. You know he's )ust
brought one of those cheap motor cars
they're manufacturing--
Yes. that's what mean
Standard and Times.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
Ladies Can Wear Shoes

)ne size smaller after using Aliens Foot.
Ease. \ certain cure TOR swollen, sweating,
,ept no substitute. Trial package FREE.
Address A. ;. Olmsted, Lc Roy, y. Y.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21

Man is not the creature OF circum
stances: circumstances are tho crea
lures OF men.-Disraeli.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21

The greatest cause OF worry on
ironing day can be removed by using
Defiance Starch, which will not stick
TO the iron. Sold everywhere. IL OF.
fnr iOC.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21

Wisely and slow; they stumble that
run fast-Shakespeare.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21

Mrs. Winsiow's Soothing syrup.
or ehildren teethins, softens the gums rrduess in
umAton sisJs pain. cures sind collie. sc . bottle
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
To Cure Cracked Skin.

Sometimes you will lind an over.
zeaous housewife whp has neglected.
her hands until the skin has cracked
Pure mutton tallow may cure this hut
mutton tallow doen not agree win
every skin, and in that case the fol.
lowing pomade should be made nm and
rubbed well into the skin two or
'thre times day: Take one ounce
of cocoa butter and one ounc. a,
sweet almonds, one dram of oxide Of
Eine. one dram of borax and sir
drops of bergamot. Heat the cocoa
butter and oil of almonds in a doubIa
boiler. then add the oxide of zinc and
the borax. Take on the fire and
STIR gently until 1t cools and add the
oil OF bergamot. This is very heal
ing pomsae and in connection wI.h
the paste will soon effect cure
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
svrFgRrp roRrvass.
BACKED with Palm, Day ana "s'
for vears.

wm II. Walter, engineer. OF Cha.s,
..or,h Ills. writes: kidney aisee'u
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
Mrs. Plnkham's In'it,ilH ~

Women suffering from -!
female weakness are u.
promptly communicate VA
Pinkham. at Lynn, Mass
symptoms given the ''o''s 'o']
located and the quickest ,s,] w
way of recovery advised ~
vast volume of experience ~
female ills Mrs. Pinsn'n u
has the very knowledss u
help your case. Her '''A
and always helpful ,..I
,osnd Succeeds Mhefe
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
MRS. PRE- htSIia

Mrs. Prcc McKi,riek, Q! hl
Wis, writes
Dear Mrs. Pinkham:
"for six years sufe~l hHy
weakness. I was 80 irusnv ~
20 from three weeks 10 sr ~
thought | would give LYDIA I 4
Vegetable COMPOUND iriil
"Sow | am ono. NOR uslfds
work without a pain Any esvs9
can write to mo and ! VII rs'sx
gladly"
Women should remenhsf ~
T.. Pinkhams vege,ab!. "a
holds the record for d, z
number OF actual cures Of -
Every suffering womaa u
United States Is asked % -
following invitation. i 81
bring you health and ~
your life.
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
II asol1.'

w,.. ~ 49,
dear. you have ~
Husband-fos'rs ~!
ways right. Hs,s
some whisky!-Tr,'.:..l
from Fliessnds Blstt-
The Ordway new era., 1907-06-21
Too True.

Too True.
preamsr-Do you ever see picture.
tn the finmes7 ~ - -
Realfst- No. bit / - coal MOI. AZ
f1ofu6 lir66 1laa6 ~ - = "a:
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1907-06-26
STRUCK BY LIGHTNING.

VIM. Johnson living at Ferris Cen
tire was struck by lightning last Sun
day at Elm Hall, during the severe
electrical storm at that place. Chill
dren's day exercises were in progress
and Mr. Johnson had looked for
shelter under a large tree. The bolt
struck the tree and scattered. Mr..
Johnson was unconscious for hours
and it was feared that life could not
be restored. The Record learns how
ever that he is recovering.
Mr.. Johnson was married only one
week ago, and will be remembered
as a former high school student in
Alma. He was also the best pitcher
the local team ever had. His many
friends who have been making inqur-
les will be pleased to know of his
recovery.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1907-06-26
TUSCOLA COMMISSIONER

A bill has passed the legislature
changing the method OF electing a
county drain commissioner for Tus-
cola county, and has become a law
having received the approval OF Gov
ernor Warner. 1t provides that at
the election TO be held in April, 1908,
and each second year thereafter, a
county drain commissioner shall be
elected whose term OF office shall be-
gin on the first day OF May follow
ing his election and continue for two
years and until his successor shall
be elected and qualified He must
file the constitutional oath of office.
and give bond in the sum of ten
thousand dollars, to be approved by
the county clerk, treasurer and Judge
OF probate. and these same officers
are charged with the duty OF ap-
pointing successor in case a vacancy
occurs. All provisions for the cleo
ton are the same as for the general
elections held in the state, and for the
official canvass of votes as provided
in the election OF circuit Judges.
Powers and duties are to be the same
as provided under the drain laws of
the state. Said drain commissioner
may, in his discretion, appoint a dep
uty drain commissioner who, in the
event of the inability or disqualified
ton of the commissioner, shall be
empowered to act in every capacity
as his principal and receive the same
compensation, the compensation of
the drain commissioner TO cease dur
ing such time. The deputy is re-
quired 10 give bond in the sum Of
two thousand dollars. The office of
the drain commissioner must be
maintained at the county seat where
all the records pertaining to the of
flee must be kept; such office 10 be
furnished at the expense OF the
county by the board of supervisors
He shall have power to employ coun-
sci in all litigation where it is not
the duty of ihe prosecuting attorney
10 conduct the same, such attorney
being paid out of the drain funds ap-
pertaining TO the drain from which
the litigation arises Provision is
made for the retention of office by
the commissioner holding office
December 81, 1907. until commits
sioner is elected and qualified under
the terms of this act Commission
ers elected under the new act arc
to receive a salary of one thousand
dollars year, TO be paid monthly
in the same manner as other county
salaries are paid, and for expenses in
connection with the duties of his of
hce sum not exceeding three hund-
red dollars.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1907-06-26
COMMENCEMENT EXERCISES

The High School Commencement
exercises were held in the opera
house last Friday evening. the ex-
eroises commencing at eight o'clock.
The hall had been very prettily dec
GRATED by the Juniors and in spite Of
the extreme heat the opera house was
filled to overhowing. The speaker OF
the evening was President c. T.
Lancaster OF Olivet College. The
graduating class this year was a
large one consisting of eleven stud
ents as follows: Lloyd Eyer, Harry
Hall, Ross d. Tibbetts, Roy Will
Jams, Theo Amesbury, Mary En-
sley, Hazel Bahlke. Julia Wynn,
Myrtle Lewis, Maude Sullivan, Alta
Taylor The program of the evening
was as follows;
Prayer by Rev. Elder of the Bap-
tist church.
Music by High School Chorus.
Address by Pres. c. +. Lancaster
of Olivet College.
Music by the High School Quar-
tette.
Presentation Of diplomas by Prof.
Ellsworth.
Benediction by Rev. Elder.