davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-03-03

afther father was dead an gone with a large piece iv broken iron in his stom- ach or back as tn case might be, but pinsion come firm tn Goyernmint. So, tn day war is declared ye come over here an stick sthrange- -lookin' weepin in me hand an I close down me shop an go out somewhere niver was befure an maybe lose me leg defindin' tn hearths iv me counthry, me that niver had a hearth iv me own to warm me toes by but tn oil stove in me bed room An that's tn kind iy men ye'd be wantin to tax like a pushcart or COW. Onscrupulous yillain
 'Whin ye tax th' bachelors ye tax valor Whin ye tax tn bachelors ye tax beauty. We've got to admit that we're much finer lookin lot iv fel- lows thin tn marrid men. That's why we're bachelors. Iris with us as with tn ladies' A lady with an cratic face is sure to be marrid befure Dhream
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-03-03

iv Beauty. She starts to wurrull right away, an what Hogan calls th' doe thrine iY av'rages is always with thim that starts carly an makes nanny plays. But tn Dhream iY Beauty fig ures out that she can wait an take her pick, an 'tis not ontil she is bump in thirty that she wakes up with a scream to tn peril iv her position an runs out an pulls man down firm tn top iv buss. Nanny a plain but de- tarmined young woman have l seen happily marlid an doin' tn coollin' fir large family whin her frind who had her pitcher in tn contest fir tn most beautiful woman in Brighton Park was settin' behind th' blinds waitin fr some wan to take her buggy ridin'.
 So il is with Us. A man with face that looks as if some wan had thrown it at him in anger nearly always mar ries befure he is old enough to vote. He feels he has to, an he cultiYates what Hogan calls tn graces. How often
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-03-03

socks since was boy. Whin l make
 holes in me hosiery throw thim away.
 Iris a fine idee iv tn ladies that men
 are unhappy because they have no wan 10 darn their socks an put buttons on their shirts. Tn truth is that man is not unhappy because his socks ar-re not darned, but because they ar-re. An as fir buttons on his shirt, whin tn buttons comes off a bachelors shirt he fires it out iy tn window. His rule about clothes is thurly scientific. Tn survival iv tn fit, dye mind. Tn oth- CTS to tn discard No marrid man dares to wear tn plumage iv bache- Tor. If he did, his wife wud suspict him. He lets her buy his cravats an his cigars an 'tis little diff'rence it makes to him which he smokes.
 "Twud be villanous to tax tn bach elors. Think iv tn moral side iv it. Whats that? Ye needn't grin. l said moral. Yes. Sir. We're tn most on selfish people in tn wurruld. All tn throubles iv tn neighborhood ar-re me throubles an me throubles ar-re me own. If ye shed tear fir amy person but wan ye lose yeer latch kay. but hayin' no wan in partillar to sympa- thize with, I'm supposed to sympathize with iyry wan. On tn conthry, if ye have amy griefs ye cant bear ye dump thim on tn overburdnened shoul- ders iy ye'er wife. But if l have amy Sriefs l must bear thim alone. If a bachelor complains iv his throubles, people say: oh, he's gay dog. Sarves him right An if he goes on com plainin' he's liable to be in grzreat peril. 1 wudden't dare to tell me woes to ye'er wife. If did, she'd have good cry, because she injyes cryin', an thin she'd put on her bonnet an r-run over an sick tn widow O'Brien on me
 "Whin lady begins to wondher if I'm not unhappy in me squalid nome without tn touch iv woman's hand ayether in tn tidy on tn chair or in tn inside pocket iv tn coat, l say: No, ma am, I live in gr-reat luxury, surrounded be all that money can buy an nanny things that it cant or wont. There ar-re Turkish rugs on tn flure an chandyleers hang firm tn ceilins. There 1 set at night dhrinkin absinthe, sherry wine, port wine, champagne, beer whisky, rum, claret, kimmel, weiss beer, cream de mint, curaso an binidictine, occasnally tallin' a dhraw at an opeem pipe an r-readin' a Fr-rench novel. Tn touch iv wom- ans hand wuddent help this here abode iv luxury. Wanst, whin l was away, tn beautiful Swede slave that scrubs out me place iv business broke into tn palachal boodoor an in thryin' to set straight tn ile paintin iv tn Chicago fire burnin' Iivator B, broke piece off frame that cost me two dol lars iv good money. If they knew that tn ony furniture in me room was cane bottomed chair an thrunl an that there was nawthin on tn flure but ilecloth an me clothes, an that 'tis so long since me bed was made up that it's now a lfesze plaster cast iv me, I'd be dragged to tn altar at tn end iV a chain.
 "Spealdn as wan iv tn few survivin' , bachelors, an old vetnran that's es- ! capped nanny peril an got out iv nanny a difficult position with honox.c | I wish to say that fair woman is niver so dangerous as whin she's sorry fir
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-03-03

Now, there's a nice, pretty, atthractiye girl. l hope she'll marry we'll An whin she marries wan iy our frinds VIC say: 'Ain't it too bad that such fine girl shud throw hersilf away on prac- tical joke iy Nature like that By an by whin the roses fade firm our cheeks an our eye is dimmed with age, we bow to tn iniyitable, run down tn flag iv defiance, an ar-re yanked into tn multichood iy happy an speeches. marrid men that look like flash-light pitchers. Tn best looliin' of us niyer get marrid at all
 Yes. Sir, there's no doubt we do a good deal to beautify tn landscape. Whose pitchers ar-re those ye see in tn adyertisemints iv th' tailorman? There's not marrid man among thim. They're all bachelors. What does tn gents furnishin' man hang his finest Geckties in tn front window fir but to glisten with a livlier wish, as Hogan says, tn furnished bachelor? See tn
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-03-03

ye'er own husband an think what Us bachelors have saved nanny iv ye'er sisters firm. Besides, aren't we tn
 hope iv tn future iy tn instichoochion iv mathrimony? If tn onmarrid ladies ar-re to marry at all, 'tis us, tn bold bachelors, they must look forward to-. Lave us our money. We're not bache- lors firm choice. We're bachelors be- cause we cant make a choice. Ye all look so lovely to us that we hate to bring tn tears into tn eyes iV ithers iv ye be marvin some iv ye. Con sidher our onforchnit position an be kind Don't oppress us. We were not meant fir slaves. Don't thry to3coerce us. Continue to lay fir us an, hope on. If ye tax us there's hardly an old bach elor in tn land that won't fling hls five dollars acrost tn counter at tn
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-03-03
THE BACHELOR TAX
s.c.o.o.o.t,.o.<s.o.3..o.o.C.o.cs.c

years an remains unmarrid
 An why shud we be taxed? We're th mainstay iy tn Constitution an about all that remains iv liberty. II ye think h highest iooty iy citizen ship is to raise a family, why don't ye give a vote to tn shad? Who puts out Neer fire f'r ye. who supports tn Nay fional Governmint be payin most iv th' intarnal riYnoo iooties, who maintains tn schools ye sind ye'er ignorant little childher 10, be payin' tn saloon licenses. who does tn fghtin fr ye in tn wars but tn bachelors? Tn marrid men start all tn wars with loose talk whin they're on a spree. But whin war is declared they begin to think what q tm-r-be thing 'twud be if they niver come home to their fireside an their wife got mario again an their grand childher an their widow an tn man that marrid her an his divorced wife an their rilitives, descindants, friends an acquaintances wud have 10 live on
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-03-03

next year to see me throttin' around with leather collar an brass tag on me neck. If me tax isn't paid tn bachelor wagonll come around an tn bachelor catcher'll lasso me an take me to tn pound an I'll be kept there three days an thin, if still unclaimed, I'll be dhrowned onless tn pound keeper takes fancy to me.
 yen niver see it, me boy. No, Sir. Us bachelors ar-re a sthrong body iy men polytickally as well as handsome an brave. If ye thry 10 tax us we'll fight ye to tn ind. If worst comes to worst, we won't pay tn tax. Don't ye think fir minyit that light-footed heroes that have been eludin onprin- cipled females all their lives won't be able to dodge a little thing like a five dollar tax. There's no clumsy col lector in tn wulruld that cud catch up with a man iv me age who has avoided tn machinatons iv tn fair f'r forty
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-03-03

"Where?"
 Home"
 Why, it's arly yit. We're not goin' home at this hour? Why, 'tis just tn front dure iv tn avenin'." I've got to go.'
 ''Ye'd betther stay a while. It's lonely here alone.'
 T mustn't. l want to see tn childher befure they go to bed"
 But ye aint goin to lave me here alone?"
 q wisht I didn't have to, but got to-"
 "Oh, be a good fellow. Here, what'll ye have? It's on tn house.
 No, I'm goin'. I lave ye here to- ITO what?" demanded MT Dooley. ''To pay tn rale bachelor tax," said Mir. Hennessy.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-03-03
BY F.. P. DUNNE
,.o.o.o.o.ss.s,.s.,.c.

tax office an say: Hang tn expinse. It's worth it. "
 We're surely a fine lot iy men" said Mr. Hennessy. Grand men like ye oughtnt to have pay taxes. Good. night
 Where ar-re ye goin'?p asked MT. Dooley.
 Tin goin home.'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-03-03

do ye hear about fellow that he is very plain, but has a beautiful nature. Ye bet he has. If he hadn't an didn't always keep in tn show case where all tn wurruld cud see he'd be lynched he tn Society fir Municipal Improvement
 But tis diff'rent with us comedy bache- lors. Bein' very beautiful We can af- ford to be naughty an peevish. It makes us more inthrestin'. We kind iv look thim over with a gentle but supeeryor eye an say to oursilyes:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-03-03
Mr. D00ley's Philosophy

ye. Whin tn wurruds, Poor man rises to her lips an tn nurse light comes into her eyes, I know 'tis time fir me 10 take me hat an go. An if tn hats not handy l go without it.
 T bet ye tn idee iy taxin' bachelors started with tn dear ladies. But I say 10 thim: Ladies, is not this a petty revinge on ye'er best frinds? Look on
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-03-03

lordly bachelor comin' down tn sthreet with his shiny plug hat an his white vest, tn dimon' stud that he wint in debt f'r glistenin' in his shirt front, an tn patent leather shoes on his feet out shinin tn monday sun.
 "Thin see tn mario man with tn wrinkles in his coat an his tie undher his ear an his chin unshaven. He's walliin' in his Congress gaiters in q way that shows his socks ar-re mostly dalned. l niyer wore a pair iv darned
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-03-03

LLTHIS here pa-aper says said
 Mr. Hennessy, that they're
 A soin to put a tax on bache- lors. That's r-right Why shuddent there be d tax on bachelors? There's one on dogs.
 "Thats right, said MT. Dooley. An they're goin' 10 make it five dollars Il year. Tn dogs pay only two. It's quite concession 10 LIS. They con sider us more than twice as Yallyable, or annyhow more than twice as dan gerous as dogs. l suppose ye expect
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-03-03

as l went up the walk I passed the two pet donlieys of the kings little ebony princes, which were feeding under the trees.
 As l neared the house I was met by the kings aidde-camp, or the man who came lain. He was dressed in white duck and he spoke French fluently He is a negro ol Martinique, who has been with Behan- 2in for some years. He took my card and asked me to stay outside while he learned whether his majesty would receive us Within few moments he returned and led us upstairs to the .Veranda. Here we waited while the high court chamber lain" crawled in through one of the win dows and passed out several eanc-aedt ed chairs 10 us, asking us to rest upon them until his majesty was ready. This we did
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-03-03
NlIW.
 A Word With the Grown Prince.

As we tarried the crown prince, Oualino,
 came around the corner and we chatted with him. He is a young fellow of about Is, as black as your boots and with full negro features. He is intelligent, has been educated in the schools of Mar unique and has also gone to school here. He speaks French well and understands Il few words of English. He was only six
 years old when E's fL'Aer was carried
 away from his kingdom, less than thr- teen years ago, and like the old king, he
 desires to go back to Dahomey. He is quite Geuif9d and has what micht e
 called d dgnihed air. He told me that B,-
 hazin had been ill eyer slnce he canlc tp
 Algeria: that the weather did not agree
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1907-04-27

1t is the duty of every "Old Conted-
crate" on the Eastern Shore of Vlr-
ginia to be present at the roll call, per-
baps the last to the most of them, to be
made at the reunion of Confederate
Veterans in the city of Richmond from
Nav 3Oth to June Sd next, and none OF
them will have an excuse to stay away
on the plea of being too poor to be pres
ent. Entertainment, as will be noted,
bv the call of the adjutant of Hartman
son-West Camp in this issue OF the
paper, will be provided for them in the
city of Richmond when they get there
and the citizens of Accomac, doubtless
will be too glad to furnish transporta
ton to all who need it. 1t is their duty
to be present and should be thel1
pleasure to mingle again with their OK
comrades and recount the deeds OF glor.
won by them on many hard-fough
battle field. 1t is duty they owe t
their children and their children's child
rem to thus show them that they are stl
proud of the cause for which so many @
them fought and died. Itwas gloriou
cause and must not be dimmed by tn
lack of interest on the part Of any
those who participated in 1t.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1907-04-27
Milking nachlnes.

Milking machines have been Install
ed by practically all of the expert.
ment stations and large number OF
individuals; and we are constantly
getting enquiries as to results to be
expected from their use.
4 machine was installed at the Vlr-
pinia Experiment Station in July 1906,
and from 35 to 40 COWS were MIXED
with it for period of six months,with
more or less satisfactory results. VI
the entire number there was only one
COW that absolutely refused to give
her milk down to the machine; and
after it was evident that she was going
drv from the machine milking 1T was
fonnd necessary to resume hand milk
| ing with her. In general it was found
nervous and excitable COWS gave bet
fer results for machine milking than
| for hand milking. This was very
noticeable in the case of an Angus
COW and Holstein COW where com.
parison of 30 days milking by hanc
and machine showed an advantage OF
% per cent. in favor of the latter
method. 1t was also noticed that
COWS which were in the habit of Civ
ing UlGlr MIX QOWu I4OOiJ ohN "tAN@J
were MIXED as satisfactorily by ma
chine as by hand.
There is no question but that thu
machine will draw all of the M Tx GU
of the milk cistern; the only question
lis whether this mechanical metbo(
will furnish sufficient stimulation tt
the nerve cells of the udder to cause
them to perform their function o
milk secretion. 1t is necessary t.
manipulate the milk glands thorough
"; and where this is conscientious.
, and persistently done, the majority o
COWS will probably give as good. re
suits for machine milking as for ham
milking. At the same time, there
greater danger of leaving the COW
partially MIXED by machine than b.
:. hand. -, .
A 60 day test was conducted with 2
COWS, 10 of them were MIXED by han
! and 10 by machine for the first 80 day!
: At the end of this time the method
of milking were reversed and the e2
pertinent continued another 80 days
The summary of this 60 days TEL
G showed slight advantage in favor
+ hand milking.
i Milton P. Jarnagin,
Instructor in Animal Husbandry.
!, Blacksburg, Va, March 20, 1907.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1907-04-27

Congressman James Hay, OF Virginia,
differs with many of the politicians IN
the State, in being willing that the peo-
pie of the State should select their can
didates instead of permitting the bosses
to do it, and is strongly in favor Of the
present State primary. He predicts
that it will not be abolished, but SO
strengthened that it will gain friends
81 feel fairly confident" says he,
"that the next Legislature will legallze
the primary as we have it and put upon
the State the cost thereof. believe 1t
will be provided that any party desiring
to nominate candidate for office by the
primary plan may come into the genera
primary and do so, at the public cost
This would make it fair to all parties
It would not be fair to make people OF
all shades of political faith pay the cos
of a Democratic primary, for instance
unless it were provided that every part!
could have the cost of its primary borne
bv the State of county. l have no
worked out the details of the scheme.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1907-04-27

The educational exhibit which will
be made at the exposition will be in
teresting and instructive; The ex-
bibit will consist largely of work done
by pupils of the public schools, IF from m
the primary grades up, and will show
results surprising those not familiar
with the methods in the public school
at this time. The cities and counties
having exhibits will include: Rich,
mond, Norfolk, Lynchburg, Newport
News, Portsmouth, WythevllIe, hoa'
noke, Charlottesville, Bedford, oCaun'
ton Winchester, Hampton, Abingdon
Clifton Forge, Alexandria, Peters
burg, Suffolk and others. The excel
lence.of the rural schools will bt
shown by exhibits from the following
among other counties; Henrico, Able
marie, Fairfax, Fauquier, Accomac
Stafford, Alexandria, Hanover.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1907-04-27
Saturday, April 81, 1907.

The monument to Francis Mackenzie,
the founder of the Presbyterian Church
in America, may not be erected at the
Mace where he is buried on Holden 5
Creek. Until Thursday of last week
such was the intention of the Presby-
terian brethren, but the low tides on
that day in Pocomoke river prevented
a number of eminent divines from
reaching the site selected for the monu-
ment and now many Of them, 1t is
stated. favor Rehoboth, Somerset coun-
tv. Md. as a more suitable place. The
claim too has been made that it should
be erected in Boston, Mass, but III
the fitness of things" there is only one
place for it. The records of Accoma(
county show that the distinguished
divine spent the most of his life here
and that her soil was his last resting
place-and could any place be NOR
suitable for the erection of a monu
ment to perpetuate his memory thai
that in which he began and ended nj
labors? What place could be NOR
suitable than Holden's Greek, nea
Pocomoke river, the dividing line be
tween the two States in which he spen
his life in the work of the Presby
terrain Church? Nor is it Officiousnes
on the part of any Virginian to mSis
that the first shaft to be erected shout
be at his burial place. His life enter
very largely in the history of Virgin
and all of US, even if we are not Pres
byterians, have the right to assert on
interest in the fame of one of her dl'
tinguished sons and to insist that tn
truth of history shall not be perverte
by the erection Of a shaft to him /
some other place.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1907-04-27
Novelty Advertisement

March 3Oth, in Accomac News, states
that A. w. Lilliston is not their agent;
that's true. have not claimed to be
since seeing the material they have on
hand to work up in 1907 Buggies, l
positively would not become RESPONSE
BILE to my trade for any such buggies.
Of last seasons buggies
gave dissatisfaction by dropping to
pieces. They also state that | have
not any of their 1917 Buggies. l have
returned checks endorsed by the Nov
elty Carriage Works, for buggies ship,
ned as late as January 10th, 1907, and
know whereof speak, Of which can
be bought at $3.50 and $500 each.
A. w. LILLIsTON,
Onancock, Va.
April 3rd, 1907.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1907-04-27
Novelty Buggies.

The Novelty Carriage WORKS, OF
Wllmip con, Del, begs to inform tne
nublic that they have instructed the,r
attorneys to bring action against "A; w.
LiIiiston for damages on account OF the
Iibelous statements made by MIN III
regard to the Novelty Buggies ana
nublished In recent issues OF the Acco-
mack News. This action will put IN
issue the truth of Mr.. Lilliston's state
ments, and will give him an oppofi,,
tunity to explain why 1t was tnat II
two thirds of last seasons buggies
gave dissatisfaction by dropping 10
pieces, "he wanted to contract Id Janu-
ary of this year for the purchase OF one
hundred and fifty $50 OF these bug
gies TO be delivered to him before
January Ist, 1908, and upon the condi-
tion that the Novelty Carriage WORKS
would not furnish buggies OF their ue.
sign to anyone else in Northampton
or Accomack counties during tha'
| time.
Novelty Carriage Works, Inc,
April Is, 1907. Wilmington Dei'
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1907-04-27

The nineteenth annual session OF
the Woman's Missionary Union, Aux
iliary to the Southern Baptist Con
vention, will convene in Richmond on
Thursday, May 18th, adjournlng sun
day afternoon May 18th. The SEES
sions of the body will be held in the
main auditorium of the Second Bap
fist Church.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1907-04-27

NoT1oE-All persons indebted to es,
tate of ]. P. Thomas, deceased, Will
please settle same, and all persons
having claims against said decedent
will present them to
Thomas B. James,
administrator.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1907-04-27

The Carnegie Foundation, which has
for its object the advancement OF
teaching and encouragement OF those
who instruct the American youth,
has awarded retiring allowance TO
Francis H. Smith, for more than fifty
wears professor of natural philosophy
at the University of Virginia.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1907-04-27

HATS GIVEN AwAy-We want a
lady in each neighborhood to adver-
tise for us. Write at once. A SPLEEN
did stock of millinery with prices low
to suit the people; and also special
| lines of fancy goods. Our mail order
business is remarkable success. Ad-
dress ooo
Box 800,
Berlin, Md.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1907-04-27

For RENT-For year 1908 three OF
four horse farm in a high state o.
cultivation, with good pasture anc
abundance of resources, situated or
head of Pungoteague Creek, where
the late J. P. Thomas died. Apply tc
Thos. B. James, agent for heirs,
Melfa, Va.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1907-04-27

CORPORATION Commissioner Henry @.
Stnart has not authorized any an
nouncement of his candidacy fol
governor of Virginia to succeed Gov
ernor Swanson, but the impression
prevails among the people OF the
Ninth congressional district that ne
will make the race.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1907-04-27

Connolly Trigg, former congressman
from the 9th Virginia district, died IN
Abingdon, Va, Tuesday, OF pnIeu-
monia aged 60 years. He served III
the orty-ninth Congress: Since then
he had practiced law at Abingdon.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1907-04-27
Business Notices.

NoT1cE-Money to loan on unen,;
numbered real estate or other gooo
security. Apply to
Eastern Life Insurance Co., Inc,
or Warner Ames, Attorney.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1907-04-27

NoTICE-This is to give notice to
all members of the Atlantic District
Mutual Live Stock Insurance Asso--
citation, of Atlantic, Va, that on and
after this date any member using
their stock for hauling mine props or
saw logs will do so at their own risk.
This association will not be liable for
any loss by death or permanent DIS
ability of said stock used in said work
S. ]. Marshall, Secretary,
Anril 13. 1907. Atlantic, Va.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1907-04-27

FOR RENT-For year 1908 farm on
Folly creek known as Dix farm.
A. G. Kelly,
Onancock, Va.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1907-04-27

Senator John w. Daniel has accept
ed an invitation to deliver the address
of welcome to the Grand Camp U. c.
v, on Friday, May 31st, in Richmond