davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
The Bachelor Maids Keys.

''Do 1 enjoy the freedom of latch
keyr' exclaimed the bachelor maid bit
terIy Look at that bunch"-holding
aloft ring full of keys Fifteen, and
l have to carry all of them all the
time. This one is the key to the studio
building, this to my own studio, this to
my club, this to my hamper at the
club, this to my desk, this to the Sc
cret drawer of the desk, this to
trunk, this to another, this to my let
ter box, this to my sewing machine
oh, yes, the woman who comes to clean
my studio would Go her annual sewing
there if | didn't-this to my box in the
safety deposit, this to the piano-to
keep the woman from using it, OF
course-this-p positively | forget what
it is for, but / know l need it often.
I'm simply worn out Juggling around a
wrist bag big enough to hold them all.
l assure you, my dear, that if you ever
hear l have committed matrimony you
may tell all my friends l needed a
man to carry my keys for me."-New
York Sun.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
Before the Bar.

The terms admitted to the barr and
"before the barr are of English origin
The bar" in question is the barrier
or railing which separates the judge
and the other officers of the court from
the rest of the courtroom. In earlier
days the parties to a suit presented
themselves before this bar, accompa-
MED by their counsel. A lawyer, after
keeping the required number of terms
at the inns of court and passing q sat
isfactory examination, was then en-
titled to appear before the bar on be-
half of client, or, in other words, he
was admitted to the bar" The Eng
lish word "barrister" suggests the tech
meal meaning of this word.-Scrap
Book.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
Snake Worship,

Python worship or the worship OF
snake gods is still practiced in parts
of the west coast of Africa. In Da-
honey and Ashanti there are temples
where pythons are kept to receive the
alteration of the people. The snakes
are not confined to the precincts Of the
temples. Small holes are left in the
inclosing wall, through which they
pass and sometimes make themselves
very much at home in the houses of
found word is sent to the temple, the
priests come and with many apologies
to his snakeship pick him up and car
~ him back home.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
Hioh Game and Fools.

"Never eat game high" said an anti
quarry. people will tell you that high
game is tenderer. What rot! OF
course it is tenderer, but would you
want your steak or your chop spoiled
In order that it might be little softer
to the teeth? No, never! Highness in
game is an anachronism, a relic Of the
coaches. In those days it was impos-
sible to deliver game to the cities fresh
transit was too slow. All game was
high, and men ate it high because 9th.
erwise they couldn't eat it at all;
hence to eat game high nowadays,
when there is no necessity for it, is to
be a fool Cincinnati Enquirer.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
Made Sure 1t Was Used.

An old farmer and his wife, noted
for their niggardliness, had a custom
of allowing the servant only one match
to light the fire with each morning.
One morning the match failed to kim
die, so the servant went to their bed
room door and asked for another one.
A whispered consultation was held
between the two, then audibly the wife
said:
"Will you risk her WI anither ane,
John?''
81 doot Well haze tae risk her, Janet, y
replied John, "but be sure an seek a
SIGHT O. the ane she got last NIGHT. =
Glasgow Times.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
q Surprise.

A cook at a cheap boardin house
played little game on a grumblin.
boarder by serving him with q piece Of
sole leather instead of beefsteak
you've changed your butcher. Mrs.
Hascher?' said the boarder, looking ur
ut the landlady after saving two o.
three minutes at the leather.
Same butcher as usual" replied the
boarding mistress, with a patronizing
smile "WhyY
"Oh, nothing much" said the board
or, trying TO make an impression ON
the steak with his knife and fork,
"only this piece of meat is the tender
est ! have had in this house for some
weeks" STRAND Magazine.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
Cold Blcoded Animals.

The so called cold blooded animals
vary from the warm blooded in the
particular that their blood changes
temperature in accordance with their
surroundings. The temperature Of q
fish will be almost exactly the same as
that of the water around it, possibly
enc or two degrees higher. A snakes
tempera ture is higher in summer than
in winter, the average being 80 de-
grees. A birds average temperature is
lot. The average temperature of the
mammals is 101 degrees.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
The Mystery of Death.

Oh, death, how bitter is the thought
of thee! How speedy thy approach
How stealthy thy steps! How uncer-
tain thy hour! How universal thy
sway. The powerful cannot escape
thee; the wise know not how to avoid
thee; the strong have no strength to
oppose thee; the rich cannot bride
thee with their treasure. Thou art a
hammer that always strikes, sword
that is never dull, net into which all
fall prison into which all must en-
ter. sea on which all must venture, q
penalty which all must suffer, a trib-
ute which all must pay Oh, death,
death! Implacable enemy to the BIZ
man race! Why didst thou enter into
the world ?-Luis de Granada.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
In a German Law Court.

A German law court was the scene
lately of an amusing incident. The
magistrate, a tiresome and long wind
ed person, was deciding a small case
in which the plaintiff claimed damages
for abuse. ITO call man pig or q
dog" replied the judge, "is certainly
an insult but to say that he is pig
dog is offensive, for no such animal
exists" The plaintiff glared at the
bench "Schweine-Hundv' he remark
ed with bitter emphasis.-T. Prs Lon
don Weekly.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
The Charming Woman

is not necessarily one of perfect form
and features. Many plain woman who
could never serve as an artists model
possesses those rare qualities that all the
world admires; neatDess, clear eyes,
clean smooth skin and that sprightliness
of step and action that accompany good
health. A physically weak woman is
never attractive, not even to herself.
Electric Bitters restore weak women,
give strong nerves, bright eyes, smooth,
velvety skin, beautiful complixion. Guar
anteed at Fl. J. Stangl, druggist. SOC.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
Confided In Her.

Her Mother-Does your husband take
you into his confidence regarding his
business affairs? Young Wife-Oh.
yes; he did SO only this morning
When | asked him to let me have $50
for q new gown he said he was very
sorry, but business was so bad just
now he couldn't possibly do it-Chi-
cago News.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
G.. B. Burhans restifies After Four
Years.

G.. w. Burhans of Carlisle Center, N.
Y, writes: about four years ago wrote
you stating that [ Dad been entirely
cured of severe kidney trouble by TAX
ing less than two bottles Of Foley'5 Kid
ney Cure. 1t entirely stopped the brick
dust sediment, and pain and symptoms
of kidney disease disappeared. | am
glad to say that I have never had re-
turn of any of those symptoms during
the four years that have elapsed and
am evidently cured to stay cured. and
heartily recommend Foley Kidney Cure
to anyone suffering from kidney Or blad-
der trouble H J. Stangl.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
Always or Guard.

Friend Ito draper in his shop)-I 10
tice that all your assistants squint
most horribly. Couldn't you have goo
some better looking ones?
81 chose them purposely. They are
most useful in keeping watch on PEG
pie. My customers never know Oh
which side they are looking.'-Nos I.oi-
SirS.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12

Some frivolous person has remarked
that illness was like struggle between
two people and that the doctor resem-
bled the third man, who interviewed to
separate them with a club. Sometimes
he hit the disease on the head and
sometimes the patient.-Hospital
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
One Rino and Another.

II wonder when the ring first be-
came connected with fighting?" said
the follower of pugilism. oh replied
Henpeck, q suppose it dates back to
the beginning of the Christian reli-
gion." whats that? What has pugi-
lism to do with religion?'' "Oh,
thought you were speaking Of the we'd
ding g."-Philadelphia Press.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
How Odd.

Joakley-Queer thing about that tall
man over there. All his intimate
friends call him "Short" Poakley-
All, just for joke. suppose? Joak-
ley-No; because that's his name
Exchange.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
A. Memorable Day

One of the days We remember with
pleasure as we'll as with profit to our
health, is the one on which we became
acquainted with DIR. Kings New Life
Pills, the painless purifiers that cure
headache and bliousness, and keep the
bowels right. 25c at II. j. Stangls drug
store.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
A Wonderful Happening

Port Byron, N. Y, has witnessed one
of the most remarkable cases of healing
ever recorded. Amos F. King of that
place says: "Bucklen's Arnica Salve
cured sore on my leg with which | had
suffered over 80 years. am now eighty
five." Guaranteed to cure all sores by
Fl. j. Stangl, druggist 25c.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
intermission.

He yelled at the top of his voice for
two hours and then stopped.
"Well,' said his mother, ''are yor:
going to be good? Have you finished
crying?
NO said Tommy, IT have not fin
ished I'm only resting"
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
a Thouchtful Wife.

"Why did you tell your husband that
there would be three parts to the con-
cert? There are only two"
Eyes, I know, but he will be SO pleas
ed when it leaves off sooner than he
expects ''-Fliegende Batter.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12

During the summer kidney Irregular
ties are often caused by excessive drink
ing or being overheated. Attend to the
kidneys at once by using Foley's Kidney
Cure.-H. J. Stangl.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
The innocent JOYS of Youth.

"GraciOus, Fanny exclaimed q
mother to her little daughter. "Why
are you shouting like that? Wing
can't you be quiet like your brother?'
"He's got to be quiet replied Fan
ny. He's playing papa coming home
late"
"And who are you playing?"
ooh, I'm playing your - Harper's
Weekly.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
Forcinu Business.

Coster Irritable through lack Of
trade)-Buy box O. cough lozenges,
'ang yerl Bystander-I haven't got a
cough. Coster-Well, fight me an buy
some stuff for black eyes.-London Tit
Bits.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
Not Her Full WEIGHT.

Mistress-Letta, Letta, you'll break
that fragile table with your full weight
on it. Letta-I haven't my full weight
on it; I'm standing on one foot.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
Left That to Others.

Hyker-You don't seem to be worry
ing any about your failure in business.
Pyker-Oh, no; that's one Of the
things l have turned over to my credi-
tors.-ChicagO News.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12

1t is only by labor that thought can
be made healthy, and only by thought
that labor can be made happy.-Rus-
kin.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1907-07-12
A Certain Cure for Aching Feet

Aliens Foot-Ease, a powder; cures
Tired, Aching, Sweating, Swollen feet.
Sample sent Free, also Sample of FooT-
EASE SANITARY Corn PAD, a new inven-
ton. Address, Allen S. Olmsted, Leroy
n. Y.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-11-01
Rally Day at Washington Seminary

Washington Seminary was the scene
last "Wednesday morning of an assem-
blage that each year Is looked forward
to with increasing interest The occasion
was the rally day of classes. the recep-
ton of the newly elected officers, the
presentation OF the graduate banner to
the senior class and the address of the
principal. Those who participated in the
program were Mrs. SmallWood. Miss
Ladd, Miss Pratt the preparatory class
and Miss Mason. The following pupils
are the officers for the year:
Senior class-President Miss Grace
Pratt: vice president. Miss Pearl COST
nett; secretary. Miss Mabelle Mills; treas
Urer. Miss Mamie Barton Rice.
Junior c!ass-Preside nr. Miss Glenda
MILAN; vice president, Miss Kate Moores;
secretary, Miss Margaret Won Hermann;
treasurer. Miss Hazel Gray.
Sophomore class-President, Miss Louise
Alexander; vice president. Miss Ethel
Abbott; secretary. Miss Hazel Houston;
treasurer, Miss Alma Trainer.
Freshman class President. Miss Mary
Mccain: vice president. Miss Anne Finch:
secretary. Miss Florence Mann; treas
urer. Miss Virginia MILAN.
Preparatory president. Miss Celina Cal
70: vice president. Miss Frances kenno-
dy: secretary, Miss Winifred Hanchett.
treasurer, Miss Ruth Hahchett.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-11-01
MANYKEEP AJINGLING
TOMMY TUCKER SWAMPED
WITH RHYMES THIS WEEK.

Here are a few communications from
regular and occasional jongaleurs that
| Tommy Tucker has received during the
past few days. They are just two or
three out of more than 10000 jingles that
have been received this week:
1 am sorry my rhymes have not found a
place,
Still more I am sending to enter the race.
From the start to the finish they all do
their best
To the Judges on the grand stand I must
leave the rest.
Ans-You must be thinking of the Ben
ming meet
S. r. W Charleston, S. Co.
Dear Mr.. Tucker. how patient you are
To sit down and read these rhymes.
But a shining dollar entices US on,
And these are strenuous times.
Please publish the initials,
And not my name,
For | am one of the rhymers
Who wish dollars not fame.
Ans-"Them my sentiments"
I fnclose forty jingles this time. You
did not say when the extra OppOrtuni-
early so as to be good for either Saturday
or Sunday The early bird often gets the
worm.
Ans.-You never said a truer thing.
Like Sir Thomas Upton il his race for
the cup,
I haven't the least idea of ever giving up.
In this wide contest of a four-line rhyme.
I'm sure to be rewarded in the course of
time.
Ans.-Aren't you the persistent thing?
Dear Tommy: 1 send jingle which |
am sure YOU Will like. it covers the ground
so we'll I also inClose two checks. Now,
Tommy dear. I do not like the idea of
somebody writing a whisky jingle and
signing it "NeaIe." The Wood.ey." We
are the only family living here by that
name. and l am a teetotaler. I phoheG
YOU that the checks did not belong to me,
but as YOU suggested d friend might have
sent them | Endorsed them thinking to 9
even. but | have changed my mind II
let YOU buy candy" Ia charge whole
lot more than that for the use Of my
name.
Thanking you for the brief JOY, ! am,
Yours deyotediy,
i. 3. NEALE.
Ans-I weep. To think that such sterl-
Ing integrity should go unreWardcd save
by fine internal feeling of JOY.
L. NJ. Geneva. n. VI
Though 1 do not live in Washington
now l get The Evening Star, and l am
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-11-01

other words, an Insurance against inter-
ruptions of traffic. and are Indicative of
the care taken by the company to safe
guard an uninterrupted service.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-11-01

very much interested in the jingles.
inclose u few that ] have made and
hope | won't be too late. 1 am thirteen
but as nothing was said about ages
thought l would try my luck.
Ans.-And l hope it viii be good luck
100.
G c.
Thirty-four iingIes I incIose by thunder
For am after all your plumber.
Ny eyes are tired and full of tears,
Send me a dollar for twenty beers
Ans.-My, but you're q thirsty thing
We'd give thousand for your thirst and
consider it cheap.
Inclosed find some tingles, which I hereby
submit.
Ny hopes will be blasted if some do not
The color of your money I would sure like
to see.
It would make me as happy as happy
can be.
Ans.-It isn't yellow by long ways
Mrs. W. II. b
7 stan,ls for Tommy Tucker,
Jingle editor is he.
Send in three good ones
And he'll give you a ""
Ans.-In real money, too.
rs for Tommy Tucker, who made a little
plan
To give US all some work to do, and a
dollar if he can.
l think we've got the best of him, for he
hasnt time to sleep.
But I really couldn't help him out-the
price is much too cheap.
Ans.-SOrry you feel that way. You
must have been unsuccessful.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-11-01

Here are a few communications from
regular and occasional jongaleurs that
Tommy Tucker has received during the
past few days. They are just two or
three out of more than 10000 jngles that
have been received this week:
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-11-01

A GAS WATER HEATER is THE
MODERN METHOD OF HEATING
WATER. Supplies hot water amy
where in the house, day or might,
for bath, Laundry and Kitchen.
.CorIecCe1 to amy boiler.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-09-10
COLORADO

STERLING, Colo, Sept. 9.-Philemon
H. Cook, who came to this city six
months ago, was arrested at Ration, N
M, few days ago, charged with having
obtained money on false pretenses, was
brought here by Sheriff Arnold and will
be held awaiting the October term of the
district court.
PUEBLO--Miss Bonnie Jameson, the
pretty Pueblo girl who disappeared from
her home about two weeks ago, leaving
nit suicide, was found by the officers at
the home of j. H. Ledwith.
CRIPPLE CREEK-There were no new
developments in the labor situation to-
day. A majority of the mines were closed
and no definite figures can be obtained
as to the number of men who have quit
work rather than take out the required
mine owners recommendation cards.
GREELEY-ClarenceC Candlin and Miss
Abbie Meyer, who were to have been
married today, stole a march on their
friends and were united secretly. The
groom is a son of III. Candlin of Greeley
and is one of seven sons. He Is a gradu-
ate of the Greeley high school and studied
two years in the state agricultural col
lege. The bride is former student of
Oberlin college.
DENvER-A cloudburst in Clear Creek
canyon caused blockade on the Black
Hawk line of the Colorado & Southern
railway for the second time this season,
and endangered the lives of several train
loads of passengers. An engine plunged
through small bridge into the creel
and the train was saved from similar
4 fate by the application of airbrakes- En-
gineer James Duffy and Fireman Abra
ham Golightly saved their lives by jump
| ing.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-09-10
LOUISIANA

CLINTON, La, Sent "A hard rain
fell here. The wet weather is doing some
damage to the cotton crop. Six bales OF
cotton have been received here from this
years crop against over 25O last year.
MARKSVILLE-Hav been absent
over a month on a tour in the interest OF
his candidacy, Judge Coco has arrived
home In an interview he stated that he
was much gratified at the generous hos
pitality shown him wherever he had been
and the encouragement which he has thus
far received.
ALEXANDRIA-Pres Paul Lisso
has appointed the following delegates to
represent Alexandria at the Transmissis-
sippi commercial congress, to be held at
Muskogee l. t., on November 10, 20, 21
and %. 1907 c. M. Waters, James A.
O'Shea. Webb Dear, j. w. Mitchell, Geo.
A. Patterson, Isidore Levy and w. c..
Roberts.
HOMER-The grand jury has been in
session this week and the result of it's in
vestigations in the Millerton murder case
eliminated in the finding of two true bills
for murder--one against Ben Bancum,
son of DR.. Bancum of Millerton, and the
other against the negro Bird Cooper.
HOUMA--The oyster packeries COM
menced shipments of oysters, and extern
sive consignments were made.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-09-10
WISCONSIN

ALBANY, Wis, Sept. 9-There is no
truth in the report sent out from here
that the Black Hawk Mill company had
asked financial assistance from the city.
MAD1sON-Twenty members OF the
local camp of the Modern Woodmen
went to the farm of brother member
near Madison and dug up his weeds
tended up the crops and fixed up eve.y-
thing that needed care The farm. be-
longs to Splies, woodman who is III.
ALMA-The Buffalo county training
school for teachers opened its fifth yeai
with about forty pupils enrolled.
EAU CLAIRE-The Eau Claire county
Normal school opened its third year with
an attendance of sixty. OF this ntnn0ei
thirty-nine are new students.
MADISON-State Banking Commission
er Bergh has called on the state and
savings banks of Wisconsin for report
Of the condition of their business.
CHIPPEWA FALLS-while riding tc
her home at Bear Creek, Mrs. Joseph
Rocha was bitten by spotted snake
known as the Prairie Bull. Mrs. Rochd
is now in critical condition.
ALMA-W William Hoffman, "a laborer,
about so years of age. while working OF
the government fleet fell off a rocl
barge into the Mississippi river ant
drowned. One of his companions Jumped
into the water after him, but was moi
able to save him.
| PROvIDENCE-Seven William
Dunn. who is charged by the authoritie
with having been responsible for the dealt
| of his playmate, Timothy Conway, b
throwing him from a dock where the
were playing into the water, is to b
formally arraigned in the district cour
tomorrow
Los Angeles herald., 1907-09-10
STORM KILLS SEVEN
MEN, INJURING TEN

!. RALEIGH, N. c., Sept 9.--Details +
1. of the disastrous effect of lightning I
4. stroke at Buckhorn Falls, in Chat I
!. ham county, yesterday, show that !
! seven men were killed and ten in !
+ iured. af 4
+ A heavy storm had forced fifty to /
1. seventy men to seek shelter In the !
!. cement house of the Buckhorn Falls I;
i power plant Lightning struck large :
+ tree back OF the house, and the tree. I
1. splitting, fell overv on the building, =
4. instantly killing two whites and five 1
I. negroes. and injuring three whites I
I. and seven negroes. All of the VIC Z
:. tins were employees of the Phoenix =
= Construction company. which has I
\ charge of the plant. 4
i ATLANTA. Ga, Sept. "A heavy I
4 wind and rainstorm, with binding 4
s.<e.ectric flashes, passed over Ft. !.
( Gaines, Ca. last night. All wire !
!. communication was cut, and no work I
(, was received until nearly noon today. I
i The storm prevailed over wide !
!. territory, but no loss of life has been !
!. reported. Great damage is reported !
+ to crops. I