The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1907-08-10

dozer after laughing IN my face want
ed to know IL Id run against a barber
pole"
Wears the Wrong Hat.
THAT is your painting hat. and had
II hidden away on shelf. You must
have had to spend ten minutes looking
for IT, and there you had two good ones
on the hall tree You are a very care
less man, Mr.. Bowser"
That's your usual song he growled,
"but will you tell me why you can't
stay home now and then and darn
my socks? Both of these have got
holes in the heels large enough to drive
y dog through, Is It any wonder that
have corus and bunious and have to
hobble about like an old turkey with
frozen fcet?"
"Will You please take off your shoer
she asked.
"Yes, I will. and I wish that all the
husbands and wives on this block were
here to see what have TO undergo.
There! DO you see them? Holes, Mrs.
Bowscr-h-o-l.e-s"
Where did you get those socks this
mornngT
"Out of the sock bag, of course"
"And in the lower drawer of your
dresser are at least six new pairs you
have never had on your feet!'
Mr.. Bowser was taken aback for
moment, but soon rallied and said:
"But what can q husband expect
of wife whose minister leaves the
gate wide open for stray hogs to come
in and root up thousand dollars
worth of flowers. The gas bill ought
TO show n decrease of at least a dollar
this month, but you've kept the burn
ers going night and day in your eX-
travagant way. and the bill Is probably
SO more. BY John, but no wonder that
a man on the car the other day asked
me why ! didn't get off the earth.
thought he meant IL for an insult. but
| see now that he had been studying
my face and be pitied me. He realized
that | must long for rest"
"And II you meet him again." said
Mrs. Bowser as she reached for the
gas bill ON the mantel. you might
SnoN uilu llul tue bhl ioI lniS lnOuNn
is only half what It was for the pre-
ceding one"
"Humph! Some hocus pocus about
that. ] suppose that front doorrcll is
out of order again by this time. You
can't be satisfied TO press the button
same as other folks, but you must jab
at 1t with crowbar. Fifty dollars to
get that internal bell fixed agan!"
ut has been repaired just once I'm the
last three years, and the charge was
so cents. The batteries had run out"
House Repairs Too Much.
But didn't the cook say something
a day or two ago about the lock on the
Kitchen door being broken? OF course
she did. Took hammer and stood
there deliberately and pounded away,
and you encouraged her ! snt down
this afternoon and figured up that the
repairs on this house solely on your
account cost me $4,000 year"
"They don't cost thousand cents"
replied Mrs. Bowser II have the bills
all filed away, and | looked them over
last week and found the cost less than
50. Twice you have blown mp the fur
mace, and three times you have busted
water pipes, but | am not responsible
for that"
But I'm telling you that you have
bought and wasted over 10000 dozen
clothespins In Jhe last twelve months!"
shouted MIR. Bowser as he brought his
fist down on his knee with a bang.
II have bought just four dozen, and
all but five are in the basket now.
Come down and look"
Mr.. Bowser had no case. He knew
he hadn't when he begun. He had
been met Mt all points and defeated,
and his only recourse was to clap on
his hat and start off with the observa-
ton:
Driven from homel Driven from
my own ireslde by the extravaganza
of my wife! Driven TO the river to
end allw
But two hours later he softly enter
ed the house and crept into bed with
out word. As he wandered the
streets two tramps whom he turned
down took after him and ran him 20
his own dOorsteps and chilled his blood
with dire threats. NJ. QUAD.