The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1907-06-16
SEASON 4 LITTLE BACKWARD
But the Maj VINO Rocks the Beat INT HIS
Fellows Are Expected Soon.

But the Man VINO Rocks the Beat and His
Fellows Are Expected Soon.
'Of course, this has been a pretty back
ward year for weather" observed the man
with the ravelled vuelta Abajo smoke made
In Wheeling, but all the same we're right
on the edge Of the season when the news
papers get good and interesting.
Il notice that the intelligent and kittenish
young fellow who rocks the boat and pre-
cipitates four Of the most beautiful and
highly respected young women OF the COM
munity, and all OF them members OF the
choir. to watery graves but manages TO
save himself hasn't begun to get right
busy yet. but give him time. give him time
June. according to the dope charts that
I've been keeping for many years. is the
best month for the pup who rocks the kin
and l expect to read q whole lot about him
during the rest Of the month.
The man who wants to change seats in
the fiat bottomed skiff about nine times an
hour has been doing pretty we'll, though,
considering the dilatoriness Of the season.
This fellow. by the way. | have observed
never knows how to swim a stroke.
quite a few OF him went to their last
sad accounting during 10o7's unwinsome
LlOhtb VI hluy' SoiiJhhB "'b'
Great Divide. OF course, numerous strong
swimmers, also occupants of the fat bot
toned skif. who lost their lives in fran
ticalIy striving to save the lives OF the seat
shutters.
Speaking OF the strong swimmers. by
the way, they don't generally get sure
enough busy in shutting of this mortal coil
till long toward the middle Of July. Most
n ~. ILL., @.,n. .vhNu Nhn aaoahnrA
doctors work unavRilingly for two hours
are described as strong swimmers; you'll
recall.
Already, we've sorrowed quite a heap
over a number OF the fellows who, never
having called q boat in their lives before,
playfully loosen a catamaran from its moor
ings and start out for a little ride down the
river or around the harbor, as the case
may be. The suddenest squat ever seen in
these parts by the oldest inhabitant always
dumps the man who never sailed q boat be-
fore into the angry pillows.
Like the mar who bankers to change
seats in the fiat bottomed skin nine times
an hour, the catamaran sailor who doesn't
know the difference between q jibboom
and q jakey band never knows how to swim
a stroke, either, and they always have to
bOIIoW tlO iNi " % 49,
to remove his damp, inert frame from the
bottom.
Extraordinary freaks OF lightning are
some shy for this season Of the year, but I'm
expecting plenty doing in that line right
soon now. It sort O. makes me feel lonesome
TO have to jump way along to the early
part Of June without reading about the
farmers wife, standing on her front porch,
being knocked senseless by q bolt Of light
ming out Of a blue sky-ever notice how
ran1u hnlta Aron ont NJ nlOudloaa akiAa1-
while the baby that the farmers wife was
carrying in her arms at the time wasn't
bothered q little bit by the bolt, but just
looked up and crowed and goo-gooed Never
freakish lightning to get busy u 1t expects
to maintain It's old time record In the de-
spatohes from Yeast Forks, Mich, and
Hully Chez, s. D.
sThe whole family poisoned by ice cream
hasn't been heard from much this spring,
but the whoppingest tuna or sea bass ever
gathered of Santa Catalina Island, Cal,
and the stunningest salmon ever snaked
out OF the Tobique River, New Brunswick,
have been gathered in on schedule time.
Considering that the jamestown ex-
position is drawing q good many visitors
to the Old Dominion I'm surprised TO OBJ
serve that the young man who wants to
carve his name on the highest rock OF the
Natural Bridge Of Virginia hasn't been
picked up in a mangled and lfelees state
yet this year, but perhaps he's laying low
for a little warmer weather.
"But the boy who dives Oh the bridge
span forty feet bow the river into eleven
inches OF water has got along on schedule
time. He's now in the hospital, living
with q broken neck, although he will be
~paralySed and perfectly helpless for the
remainder OF his life.
The Delaware peach crop is hashed to a
etandstnl, Of course, long before the usual
time this year, n the Florida orange
and grape fruit crops were disposed of
early in the spring. The boil weevil has
already begun to mess up the cotton
crop, 90 l won't have to worry keeping
tabs on that one. The green worm is doing
his usual stunt TO the wheat crop too, and
I { don't have to watch for him either.
'The usual number Of mountain climbers
nave already been lost In orevioes Of the
Tyrolean Alps, and the seven shad fisher
men on the lower Potomac who died from
getting hold OF q gallon OF wood alcohol
By mistake and drinking IL ave turned
as usual. The Minnesota cloudbursts
sesm to be soldering some on their jobs,
and tie about time for q few of
'em to get busy and sweep down the valley
at the almost Incredible velocity Of 124X |
miles q minute. The usual number OF
excursion trolleys have refused to CON-
oede the railroad right Of way at crossings
to fast trains, and 90 I WON'T nave to keep |
markers on that one either.
st sure keeps me busy. keeping SCORE
on all Of these warm weather doines, but
then there's a certain mou Of satisfao-
ton, when the seasons all over, in finding
Of the tabulations filled up n none OF
the old standbys missing, there sure is