davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-06-09
ARMS AND THE AMERICANS
From the New York Mail.

From the New York Mail.
 A RMORIAL bearings are on the
 A bargain counter. Coats-of-arms 4 A are now marked down. to $50 each in the advertisements of the Amer ican College of Arms which has been established in Paris. Satisfaction is guar anteed, and an emblazoned parchment certificate goes with every purchase. Crests are within the reach of every commuter, and shields on baby carriages may become as common as rubber plants in Brooklyn. And free of all cost we receive information that may well make Rouge Dragon turn pale and Garter King at-Arms dread the downfall of his sup porters."
 Arms and crests are not in the least a monopoly of the nobility. In Great propriated by families who. though of good standing, are not noble Eng fish merchants use them also as trade marks. There is, indeed, no req son why Americans should have leY right than Europeans to seek a practical use of armorial bearings
 This get-noble-quick" proffer is not irnpeccable in it's accuracy. There is a silly old law in Great Britain which makes the wrongful assumption of arms a misdemeanor punishable by a heavy fine. But from the new-rich American point of view these foreigners at best are queer people unconscious of their advan- tages. Their attitude toward their coats- of is much tho same as toward their porous plasters-they are things to be put on at the proper time, in the proper place, but not calling for comment nor capable of arousing the interest of nom wearers.
 No such old-fashioned notions obtain among the members of the American pseudo-aristocracy. for whom the Ameri- can College of Arms has been created. Yet admitting the demand the commer- cial success of the new concern is doubt full.
 The American parvenus wife long ago learned how to do her own heraldic chores The process is simple and does not require the preliminary $50 expend- iture. An ancestor. who was probably a serf or d servant and took his name from his master as the clansmen did in the Highlands and the negroes during the slavery period in America, gives excuse for looking up the name in a peerage and subsequent placing of the armorial bearings on note paper or carriage pan els.''
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-06-09

this first group. is the academic building with the hanking structures for chemistry and marine engineering, and between the two groups, facing the Severn river and forming the westerly side of the rectangle, is the auditorium and chapel with the superintendent's house and administration building. Looking from the steps of the basin which forms the fourth side of the rectangle, the best view is obtained of the whole group, with the dominating dome of the auditorium in the center. si00,000 for that central attraction has not been con sidered too much to make the city by the sea monument of architectural grace and unity.
 In these days, when a hundred or more cadets are turned out annually, the object of the academy is to make them efficient officers of the modern battleship. That multiplex mechanism, more delicate than an eght-day French clock and more pom derous than steel sky scraper, will not permit or treatment.
 At any moment in the present condi- ton of the navy, as a superintendent of the academy has put it, the graduated cadet must be not merely seaman, an engineer. true marine engineer ac- quainted with steam, electricity and ord nance, a navigator and surveyor, an athlete a student of French and Spanish, a gentleman. but must be qualified to take the command of a fleet or step into the chair of academic professor.
 Algebra, geometry, mechanical draw ing, skill in reading drawings, whether from the naval architect, the marine engineer or the ordnance engineer, in- tegral calculus, physics, chemistry, cleo tricity. magnetism, seamanship, regula- tions for infantry and artillery, these things begin to prepare the middle for tho professional work of the practice cruises and to be iirst-ciass men, naval tactics. ordnance and gunnery, naviga- ton, compass deviations and surveying. boilers, engineering materials, designing and naval construction. electrical engi- neering-these are the pursuits which graduation day does not put an end to
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-06-09
A Delicacy of the Season.

From Harper's Weekly.
 An amusing incident occurred in cheap cafe in Philadelphia not long ago. A tall, cadaverous individual, accompa- nied by an exceedingly short and stout woman, entered the place and took table near the door.
 Do you want oysters, Mary?" asked the man, as he glanced over the bill of fare.
 "Yes, John" answered the woman, who was the while vainly endeavoring to touch her toes to the floor, and l want a hassock, too."
 John nodded, and as he gave his writ ten order to the waiter, said:
 Bring hassock for the lady"
 .One hassock?' asked the waiter with what John took to be more than ordinary interest As the guest nodded an assent, the waiter, with a dubious air, wrote down the additional order Still he did not go but brushed the tablecloth with a towel and rearranged the articles on the table several times, while his air of dubiousness deepened. Then he gave an- other glance at the written order.
 Finally the waiter approached the man who had given this unexpected order, and, speaking sotto voce, said in his ear:
 Excuse me, sir, but I haven't been here long; so some things is little un- familiar to me. Will the lady have the hassock broled or fried?"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-06-09

for the honored first-class men, but which prepare him for the two years trying out which now begins for him.
 The Naval Type.
 It was Wainwright of the Gloucester fame at Santiago who said while he was superintendent of the Naval academy that 'the course of study and the form ation of character like the buildings, have been of slow growth, but unlike the buildings the growth has been healthy and there is no sign of decay"
 For that reason because the navy and the department is satisfied that 1t has now perfected the mold in which the sailing defenders of the nation shall be cast there is little concern at Annapolis
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-06-09

Strange things ensue. Shields show "color on color" and metal on metaI' in manner that causes heraldic de- mentia among schooled observers. A worthy matron proclaims herself an ab- bot or the occupant of an episcopal sec A God-fearing, well-behaved family is unconsciously bastardized because the baton happened to be in a coat which pleased the fancy of the unconscious as- sumer of non-existent shame.
 The new institution is noteworthy chief 1y as being the one known trap for the happily small minority of fool Americans which will fail in it's mission.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-06-09
Enjoy Life-Later.
le Outing Magazine.

From the Outing Magazine.
 Smiths obituary set me to musng again. Smith was a successful business man and died worth $10000o. Almost every week he had confdentally told me that next year he intended to retire from business and enjoy life. Next year came and he repeatedly told me the same thing. It was always next year. By-and-by he would enjoy life. Vest, by-and-by. But Smith died with apoplexy. and by-and-by never came to him on this earth as 1t seldom does to any other business or pro- fessonal man. He had worked like a slave. always anticipating that good time by-and-hX.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-06-09

when their methods of product Is crit iciseds They know they can man the boats and bring down victory with me- chanical tactical certainty and they be- lieve they can whip the army at foot ball every fall. so what do they care.
 They are charged with being theoret- ical, as not being able on graduation day to handle any ship under full steam in any sea and with not being personally conversant with all kinds of 'dynamos, motors, turrets and torpedoes. They do not answer. With hearty unanimity, strong bodies, resolute wills and their theories in their heads they give the whole body of critics "the silence" It Is enough for them that when occasion arises Santiago and Manila speaks for them,
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-06-09

I WAS a London cynic who said, "rhe
 old-fashioned respect for the young 4 is fast dying out" Parents he main tained. now pay very little attention to what their children say to them. It Is very probable that he proposed that the irony of his observation should hit hard, but however it may be in civil circles. in the army and navy families the young man in service is certainty not target for such sarcasm. He may be by a unique contrast rise in his united might and at the naval academy recently, attempt and succeed in administering the "si- lence" to a commanding officer for whom for some reason it is deemed a necessary indication of disaproval, but discipline prevails in the end and retrbutlve jus tice oVertake the experimenters
 Perhaps the exercises of commencement week have plotted out In this June de- lirium of class days all memory of the late unpleasantness at Annapolis, but 1t was only the middle of last May that there occurred the most recent exercise of midshipman resentment.
 The silence is as old as the navy itself. It is in the nature of a boycott. At the time agreed for it's application those par ticipa ting in it keep absolutely silent dur ing the whole of some meal at which the officer is present in the midshipmen's mess hall. Ordinarily the dining room at meal time is a very noisy place, and silence when the 800 midshipmen are assembled is a gruesome experience. In this case the officer sat at table for over two hours, hoping to outwit the endurance of some man. but without effect. Not man blinked. Not word was spoken. At length the battalion was dismissed to be restricted later by the commandant for an indefinite period to the confines of the in- stltution for their temerity.
 Merit of the Idea.
 Perhaps many parents wish their family of garrulous young ones would occasion- ally regard it as necessary that their elders should be given the silence but at Annapolis officers have not regarded it as a relief
 Possibly had Mark Twain timed his re- cent visit to the academy so as to make an occultation with the silence the aim of the determined young seamen
  band concert and said;
 Tt has always been my ambition to blow bass drum, but I've never been able to control my teeth"
 At which the sixty men in the band lost their pucker and caused hiatus in the music
 It is also reported that while human nature and perfect impassivity were not proof against MT. Clemens humor, when he tried to puff away on a fragrant Ha- vana 1t did not take five seconds for solemn-faced guard to tap the distinguish ed visitor on the shoulder and call atten- ton to the rules.
 Arrested again." exclaimed Mark. Con stituted constabulary will be the ruin of this country yet"
 Tt is apparent that at Annapolis rules obtain for all actions and even the re- sentiment of what is deemed to be un- warranted acts is expressed by some we'll ordered and energetically carried out sys- tenn.
 Of Recent Origin.
 The Naval academy at Annapolis is not. as West Point is generally credited with being, the shadow of one man.
Morris tribune., 1907-03-30
"The Warning Bell"

"The Warning Bell" the splendid
attraction which is offered to the pa
irons of the Armory next Thursday
evening. The play is written on pas
toral lines but contains many novel
and startling situations, and extraor-
dinarily thrilling climaxes. The story
is written around a beautiful country
girl, who goes away to boarding
school, and who is led astray by the
inevitable william, whose game is to
rob the rich father, by working on
him thru her. The first act shows the
quaint old farm house and introduces
many entertaining country characters
The second act shows the interior of
the magnificent gambling palace in
New York, where the girl and her
mother are held prisoners and from
which they make their thrilling es
cape. Act third depicts faithful re-
production of the famous Grace
church during an evening service.
The play is one of intense heart inter-
est, and it has a vein of excellent
comedy thruout. The different char
acters are drawn from life, and the
artists who impersonate them are well
known and clever.
Morris tribune., 1907-03-30
. a z NE n

Very bad roads the past week.
John Ring has rented the Noonan
farm.
Len Dunkin left for North Dakota
Tuesday.
John Hennessy returned from the
woods Friday.
Miss Lettie Hall returned from St.
Paul Wednesday.
Messrs. Siverts and Nilsson called On
w. F. Rotramel Sunday.
The Wetherly boys are now located
in North Dakota. They like the coun-
try fine.
Billie Logue visited somebody at
Hancock Sunday. We can all guess
who it is.
The Pomme de Terre river has been
troublesome lately. 1t hoated one of
Mike Mahoney's hay stacks and car
ried out the bridge at Leuti's.
Daniel D. La Boone was blowing last
Tuesday. He struck glacier which
threw his pillow out of the ground and
sent him about two rods up in the air.
He don't intend to start again until
the ground is thawed out.
Morris tribune., 1907-03-30
Street Sprinkling.

Morris, Mimi, Mar. ~, 1907
Separate sealed proposals for the
sprinkling of sprinkling district No.
one Cd of the City of Morris will be
received by the city council of said
city until eight 60 o'clock p. M, on
Wednesday, the 18th day of April,
1907, at which time they will be pub
licly opened, read and considered at
the council rooms of said city.
Proposals must be in writing and
signed by the party offering the bid
and must be accompanied by cash
deposit or duly certified check, made
payable Internationally to the order
of the city treasurer of said City of
Morris, for at least fifty ($5O.OO) dol
lars, as guarantee that contract
will be entered into, such bids to be
made upon basis of cash payments
at the end of every month during the
term of the contract for sprinkling for
services rendered.
The right is reserved to reject any
or all bids.
The sprinkling for which said bids
are to be received and the services to
be rendered are described as follows:
That the sprinkling of the streets and
avenues of said sprinkling district No.
one (D, shall, in the discretion of the
city council be commenced on or about
the 1st day of May next and continue
till on Or about the 1st day of October
next; and that said sprinkling shall
be done under contract with the said
city, let to the lowest responsible bid
der and with an improved street
sprinkler, the water for said sprink-
ling to be taken from the city hydrants
at cost of twenty five ($25.OO) dol
lars per month to the person under
taking the contract of sprinkling and
further that said streets and avenues
within the aforesaid sprinkling district
shall be sprinkled as frequently from
day to day and during each day, in
GLIDING Sunday when necessary, as in
the judgment of the city council, or
some duly appointed committee of the
same, the condition of the streets re-
quire. G. B. BURPEE.
City Clerk.
Morris tribune., 1907-03-30
From Spokane, Wash.

Mrs. G. G. Towner and Mrs. Jas.
Morrison, who have been spending
the winter in Spokane, Wash, leave
here Sunday night. Mrs. Towner
will return to Morris, and Mrs. Morri-
son will go toExcelsior to spend few
weeks with her daughter.
Geo. Smith arrived in Spokane last
Friday morning and Monday accept
ed a place to work at Harrington.
The boys from Morris, Joe Horri-
gan, Wesley Pushor, George Smith,
and Ronald Morrison spent a pleasant
day with the latter last Sunday.
Morris tribune., 1907-03-30
HIGH SCHOOL

A number of high school girls will
visit the rural schools with Supt. Rob-
erts during vacation next week.
The school was overjoyed Tuesday
when Miss Proctor broke the news
that new code would be taken up.
The spring fever has already spread
turnout the school. The boys have
began playing ball and the girls are
arranging their schedule of basket ball
games.
This has been hard week upon the
pupils. The monthly examinations
occurred and the teachers join in say
ing they never used SO much red ink
before in all their teaching career.
To say we are glad that the ar
mory has been remodeled doesn't ex-
press our attitude. The graduates now
have an appropriate place in which to
have their commencement exercises.
The Seniors received their class pins
today. The pins add greatly to the
dignified appearance of the students
and already they enjoy an added
amount of respect for their subordi-
mates.
1t was quite amusing to see the
frightened little freshman of the agri-
cultural class go down to the base
ment Thursday forenoon to witness
the examination of eggs. This is
something new for the little ones and
they seemed to enjoy it.
The Freshies enjoyed social even
ing with Miss Grace Wheaton last
Saturday eve. The freshman sur
prised her and all enjoyed the games
and refreshments. All that was really
missing was a few seniors and juniors
to add dignity to the affair.
Prof. smyser has planned pleasant
surprise for the school. AS an Easter
token he has planned to give each
pupil a little chick Matched from the
incubator. Already we hear the shells
cracking and the other day one of the
unfortunate chicks got to roaming
around in the incubator and fell into
the pan of hot water. The agricultural
class enjoyed a "stew" after school.
Morris tribune., 1907-03-30
James McCarroll Dead.

James McCarrol, who during the
last few years has been living on a
farm west from Donnelly, died yes
terday from apoplexy. The news
will be received by his many friends
here in Morris and elsewhere with
surprise and sorrow, for Mr.. McCar-
roll was held in high regard both for
his pleasant manner and his sterling
worth. He leaves large family, to
whom many friends extend sympathy.
The funeral will be held Monday.
The local lodge of Workmen, of whom
the deceased was member, will at
tend in body.
Morris tribune., 1907-03-30
Saved Her Sons Life.

The happiest mother in the little
town of Ava, Mo-, is Mrs. S. Rupee
She writes: "One year ago my son
was down with such serious lung
trouble that our physician was unable
to help him; when, by our druggists
advice began giving him DR.. Kings
New Discovery and soon noticed i'm
provement. kept this treatment up
for few weeks when he was perfect
ly well. He has worked steadily
since at carpenter work. DR.. Kings
New Discovery saved his life." Guar
anteed best cough and cold cure by J.
R. Kruger, druggist. soc and $1.00.
Trial bottle free.
Morris tribune., 1907-03-30
STATE OF OHIO, CITY OF TOLEDO, | g,
LUCAS COUNTY "a

STATE OF OHIO, CITY OF TOLEDO, GO
LUCAS COUNTY
Frank ]. Cheney makes oath that he is
senior partner of the firm of F. ]. Cheney
& Co, doing business in the City of Tole-
do. county and state aforesaid, and that
said firm will pay the sum of ONE HUN
DRIED DOLLARS for each and every case
of catarrh that cannot be cured by the
use of Halls Catarrh Cure.
FRANK J. CHENEY
Sworn to before me and subscribed in
my presence, this 9Th day of Dec. A. d.
1886.
(SEAL) A. w. GLEASON.
Notary Public.
Halls Catarrh Cure is taken internally,
and acts directly on the blood and mucous
surfaces of the system. Send for testi-
nonials free,
FL. CHENEY & Co., Toledo, o.
Sold by all drug gists, 75c. 3-11
Take Halls family pills for Costipation
Morris tribune., 1907-03-30
Bump.


The Browns Valley trainmen have
been experiencing many surprises
since last fall, it has been that the
engineers hardly knew whether they
would make the run from one day to
another, as we understand the older
man with the road has the choice of
runs, and as the Browns Valley
branch is the snap run, numerous
applications are always in for it. One
of our reporters was told the follow
ing last week.
Mike Cleary, engineer on the B. V.
passenger, laid off last fall for the
winter months, and engin eer Dan
Schilling took the run, Hamreham
bumped Schilling, Clarity bumped
Hamreham; Clarity held the run dur
the severe storms and few weeks
ago Mike Cleary decided to take the
run again and so bumped Clarity.
Mike Hamreham having bumped
|Schilling on the freight sometime be-
fore this, Clarity bumped Hamreham,
Mike Hamreham has bumped the
whole thing for the present and left
last week for Hot Springs, Ark, for a
few weeks, while Dan Shilling went to
Benson last week Tuesday to take a
turn around between that place and
Appleton.
Morris tribune., 1907-03-30
DOCTORS MIST4FES

Are said often to be buried six feet under
ground. But many times women call on
their family physicians, suffering, as they
imagine, one from dyspepsia, another from
heart disease, another from liver or kid
ney disease, another from nervous pros
tration, another with pain here and there,
and in this way they present alike to
themselves and their eaSy-going or over
busy doctor, separate diseases for which
he, assuming them to be such. prescribes
his pills and potions. In reality, they are
all only symptoms caused by some uterine
disease. The physician, ignorant of the
cause of suffering. keeps up his treatment
until large bills are made. The suffering
patient gets no better, by reason of the
wrong treatment. but prOba bly, worse. "A
proper medicine like DR.. Perce's Favorte
Prescription, directed to the cause would
have entirely removed the disease, there
by dispelling all those distressing symp-
toms, and instituting comfort instead of
prolonged misery. It has been well said,
that "a disease known is half cured"
DIR. Pierce's Favorite Prescription is
scientific medicine, carefully devised by
an experienced and skillful physician,
and adapted to woman's delicate system.
1t is made of native American medicinal
roots and is perfectly harmless in it's
effects IN any condition Of the female
system. - 4sss "rss-'a4s'-- -a-
AS powerful ineigorating tonic vFa-
vorite Prescription mparts strength to
the whole system and to the organs dis
tinctly feminine in particular For over
worked, rworn-out." rundown" debili-
tated teachers. miliners, dressmakers,
seamstresses. Hshop-girls." house-keepers,
nursing mothers. and feeble women gen.
orally DR.. Pierce's Favorite Prescription
is the greatest earthly boon. being un-
equaled as an appetizing cordial and re-
storative tonic.
As soothing and strengthening nerv-
inc vFavorite Prescription is unequaled
and is invaluable in allaying and sub
DUNG nervous eXcitability, irrita bility,
nervous exhaustion, nervous prostrat ton,
neuralgia hysteria, spasms, st. Vitus's
dance. and other distressing. nervous
symptoms commonly attendant upon
functional and organic disease of the
uterus 1t induces refreshing sleep and
relieves mental anxiety and dependency.
DIR. Pierce's Pleasant Pellets invigorate
the stomach, liver and bowels. One to
three dose. Easy to take as candy.
Morris tribune., 1907-03-30
PEPPERTON

w. Hall got some seed grain from
f. Andert Saturday.
J. King, of Morris, visited with H.
Zimmerman Sunday.
J. W. Smith and family visited with
I'll. Hoyer and family.
Oscar Hoyer and Miss Quigley were
Morris visitors Saturday.
F. Andert shipped a carload of cattle
to South St. Paul last Tuesday.
Rev. and Miss Baumgarten visited
at Chokio the first of the week.
Mr.. and Mrs. A. w. Andert trans
acted business in Morris Saturday.
Mr.. H. Hoyer went to Leonardsville
Sunday to conduct meetings there.
The Misses Amanda and Francis
Bach visited at F. Andert's Sunday.
Hiss Bessie Quigley is visiting her
sister Miss EllenQuieley at Ell. Hoyer's
this week.
Mr.. 9. Goette left for Wells, Mimi,
having received message stating the
death of his father
1t is little hard for the Pepperton
people to come to town as the bridges
are all washed away over the Muddy.
Fish are becoming plentiful even in
Pepperton. Some of our neighbors
fortunate enough to live at the Muddy
can get them with long handled
fork standing in the yard.
Ell. Unverzagt and G.. Waltersdorff
had their flax threshed last week. 1t
kept better in the stack than it would
have in the granery. If they had
thrashed it last fall, they would have
had it sold and likely the money spent
but now they have got to sell it and
the money to spend.