The Montgomery advertiser., 1907-12-15
Nusw the asnan Newss sf the weeks ..1 Months shows tAe Play fl Tnis ola wsrI1s LisAts ana sAaA- sws-rAe MarvsIoss. the LassA- able. the w.srl ana the Pathetic sf . Year.

aSle. the wesrS and the Pathetic
 ef Year.
 SY WARWICK JAMES PRIcD.
 Coronations and conventions trea- ties and court trials. battle. murder and sudden death. may divide the nrst pages of years papers between them- selves--but that is not the whole story of the news. All this may beth im- portant gist of the daily harvest, may Influence history or affect the greatesf number of people. but there is another { eide to the subject. This is the Thu. man interest" sort of thing, the triding happening. which yet tells as does nothing else of mans credulity, joys and sorrows, of his daily life itself.
 Nineteen seven's 3sS days have been rich in such news. The Supreme Court Of Mississippi. for instance. has de. oided Git was on November ID that s'Go to heiir' is not profanity. An Ohio tribunal has adtudicated MT. Beatty's whislkers (wellston growfh) to be worth 9l0l. gas company hay. ing to pay that sum for their destruc. ton in an explosion. The newsdealer Ia the Albany (N. Y) depot has offered | New York Central Railroad time tepto - tno iunhAoeI oooN
 stand.
 The French capital has done even better than these things. The Paris Chief of Police. having sent out 70 the neigh boring communes photo- graphs of an escaped criminal. In each case submitting six in as many poses of the man. received the follow ing dispatch from . southern dissrict' ~FIve of the criminals whose photo. graphs you sent already arrested; we are on the track of tho sixth."
 As Starters.
 January set a sharp pace ih this sort of thing. The very nrst day of the year. George W. Stuart of Newport. Me. set the ball a-rolling by picking two bushels of coreless apples.
 On the 5th. fruit again jumped for ward, for . io-year-oid. up at Wills den. haled before . magistrate for stealing oranges. was condemned to . birching;, fve strokes per orange and there were three taken. Upon this. pity. seized the plaintiff. "Tll leave the fruit here. sonny" said he. When they're through with you. you'll enjoy it all the more"
 V. F., is the subject of yet another First Month" oddity. He was re- ported dead; local papers published his obituary notices: and Charles laughed SO hystertcally as result that his heart was affected. To cap the climax. it transpired that the man who had been found dead was really named "Heartless."
 Divers Divorces.
 Tn the divorce courts the twelve month has shown us that. in Lawrence. Mass, at least, wife may not with impunity go through the pockets of her worser one-third: David Walkers marriage tie was legally cut on just this ground. wilmington. Del. has offered the sight of mother and mar ried daughter defendants in two di- vorce suits brought into the same court; but Perugia, Italy. beats all of these. SiEnora Balliori asked to be set free from her husband, claiming he had another wife, Balliori calmly admitted this. but added that he had two hearts--why not two wives? Phy- the court (with unanswerable logic) decided that two households were per- fectly right, under the circumstances.
 Mrs John Wade, of Sioux City, Ia., asked for realease from MT. w, and filed her petition in verse. "A Matri- monial Idyl" ran the heading. and a couple Of the S3 stanzas read:
 Just keep dog to growl and a cat
 to spit.
 A parrot. too. (for he can jaw and
 sweari)
 A monkey. to dispute and pull your
 hair.
 Don't think you need a man to strike
 even match,
 There are better places a light to
 scratch.
 Talmadge said matches in heaven
 are made.
 But birthstone attachments show
 where plans are laid.
 The case still hangs.-like the meter.
 Fuss and Feathers. s Columbus. Ohio, and Sayville, N. Y., raced each other in feathered wonders. In March. the Buckeye cauital turned out . white crow, which, quite natural Iy, lead a flock of the usual hue. Hell bring good luck to Alum Creek" !, was the Marian County judgment.- but the speakers were none of them corn planters. Sayville made reply in November. F. S. Jones. the month pre- vious. bought a jet black bantam rooster: in four weeks 1t had turned snowy white! And Sayville wants to tampering with the New York egg crop.
 Neighboring Binghampton reported (May) a hen that had adopted two tiny pigs. after the loss of her own brood of chicks, and was keeping them warm under her maternal feathers.
 Warsaw. Ind, two months later, marvelled at the return there oi d homing pigeon. which had somehow escaped from it's crate at Randolph, while en route to Texas purchaser. The bird had covered 800 miles getting back.
 The Tiny Ones.
 February brought the original skidoo baby into the world.--so to speak Of Waterbury, Conn. Charles Augustus Bauby was he christened. the 23-pound son of parents each 23 years old; born on the 23d, and protesting at 1t all 23 times within the first 23 hours of his life here. Bauby, Sen., has since de- posted $23.00 to the youngsters &C., count in the local banki
 A prodigy of another sort was re- ported (May) from St. Francisville, Ill. At six months he could talk; when less than two years he knew the alphabet; ; today. at 3-years-and- 3-months, he has decided he likes Dickens better than Shakespeare, but prefers to both the trust" stories of the daily papers. he thinks he will be railroad president when he grows up.
 Secretary Loughman, of New York's Central Park, received last March the following letter, written, of course. fin c childish hand:
 Dear MT. Stork:-Please bring Fran ces Stevens a baby boy. A white one, please. Do you bring clothes too?