The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1907-05-10
SOME NEWSPAPER
ChAFF.

off.
Mamma" he said, rs Heaven up
theVe?"
yes. dear" his mother replied.
And did | come down from Heav.
en-"
"Yes. dear"
Freddy pondered a moment. did
God let me down easy. mamma?" he
said then. again looking up at the
stars.-Iippincotts
Telephone mistakes may have their
serious sides. man who wanted to
communicate with another named
Jones looked in the directory and
called up number. Presently came
through the receiver a soft, feminine
"Hello!!' and he asked: "Who is
that?"
This Is Mrs. Jones"
Have you any idea where your hus
band is?"
He could not understand why she
rang off so sharply until he looked in
the book again and discovered that he
had called up the residence of a
widow.-IIolland's Magazine.
=
Mrs. Black was to meet her hus.
band at certain store at one o'clock.
After standing around for some time
she grew very impatient, and. think.
ing that he might have forgotten to
meet her. called up on the phone at
his place of business. Supposing that
central" had given her the right
number. she exclaimed:
Hello, Frank Is that you? I'm
nearly dead"
Well madam. | think you have the
wrong man. I'm an undertaken. and
want them all dead,"-Lippincott's |
=
A judge in Kentucky, by reason OF
his bad temper found considerable
difficulty in controlling individuals in |
the courtroom On one occasion there !
was unusual disorder. At last the |
judge could stand 1t no longer. ut
is impossible to allow this persistent
contempt OF court" exclaimed his |
honor, "and shall be forced to go to |
the extreme length of taking the one
step that will stop it," There follow.
ed long silence in the court. Final. |
ly one of the leading counsel arose
and, without the suspicion OF a smile. |
sAIs IL
what date will your resignation take |
effect?"-Argonaut
New York business man, while in |
Chicago. recently. was expecting a
money order letter in a day or two, |
says Harper's Weekly. In order to |
avoid any difficulty in Identification |
he went to clerk in the postoffice |
and said:
Il am expecting a money order to |
the amount of 800 and my name is
Thos Blank. Here are lot OF letters |
addressed to me from various places |
You will observe the postmarks. So, |
you see, II am not the man | claim |
to be | must have murdered that man
and possessed myself OF his letters,
and am now personating him. As that
is not likely, you must admit that
am the man."
The New Yorker, having delivered l
himself of the foregoing, left the post
office In few days the money order
came. and the man from New York re.
paired to the office to get his order
cashed. He expected to find the clerk
did not recollect him. Presently the
New Yorker succeeded in recalling
himself to the mans memory
"Oh, yes" said the clerk, quite seri.
ously you're the chap that murdered
the other mani"
A day or two after George B. Cortel-
you assumed the duties OF Secretary
Of the treasury, he was visited by an
elderly man who wanted an appoint.
ment as confidential clerk to one of
the assistant secretaries.
Notwithstanding the fact that he
was very puoS Ut inc u'ne MI Nortel-
you gave the elderly person hearing.
On account of his age. Mr. Cortelyou
said, he felt that he could not com
ply with the request. So, gently but
firmly, he intimated to the old man
that 1t was about time for him to 60
This, however did not dampen the
latter's spirit in the least
"Now, sir said he, las feel my
self peculiarly competent to fill one OF
these confidential clerkships. hope
that you will further consider my ap