davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22
THERE Is A REASON.
The Medical Times Explains Why
Doctors Oppose Patent Medicines.

The Medical Times for April in a
moment of frankness explains the
whole opposition of physicians to pat
ent" medicines which are taken with
out a prescription, in the following
words:
I'VE will hardly repeat here the
specific statement to the effect that
in one year $62,000,000 has been ex.
pended on patent medicines in the
United States. Enough to give every
practitioner In the country a yearly
income of $4,000. In the face of such
facts as these, all talk of love of hu.
manity, altruism, self-abnegation and
the like becomes cheap and nauseat.
ing. 1t appears to us that such bun.
combe should give place TO homely
common sense"
Reliable authority states that the
gross amount Of the patent" medi-
cine business is about s4O,OOO,0OO in
stead of $62,OO0,O00 but taking the
Medical Times figures as correct they
represent an outlay of considerably
less than 81 per capita for home medi-
cation. The cost of doctors fees ex-
elusive of medicines except such as
are dispensed for the same period.
probably was approximately $2SO.OOO,-
600. This is reached by allowing an
average income Of $4,000 to each of
the 115,000 physicians in the United
States. Even allowing that gross
business of s62.OOO,OOO is to be divid-
ed between $4,000 physicians the in
come of each would not be increased
more than $40.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22
The P.yeheioaieal Moment.

The fact that Priam was closeted
with the adjuster did not prevent Cas-
sandra from dropping in to say that
she had told him just how it would be.
She was all saved" murmured
the burntout monarch, jerking his
thumb at the retiring prophecies.
Say no more" rejoined the other.
Well call the loss total, and IL could
make 1t any more than that, old man,
Id do 1t, under the circumstances"
This incident shows the value of a
word spoken at the right time.-Puck.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22
Frills.

When girl says that IL man
kisses her without warning, she will
scream for her father, there is only
one thing to do-warn her.
A woman can forgive a man for
deceiving her, but If the cook deceive
her, never
When the drug clerk says he hasn't
a two-cent stamp. ask him for some
thing just as good"--two ones, for
instance
Men with push should go up hill.
Men who push downhill usually end
by skinning their noses.
IL takes a lifetime of practice to
nit the small bullseye of success with
he target rifle of effort.
Never go bear hunting with pop
guns. 1t is hard on the bears nerves.
II is impossible for you to choose
your ancestors. but you can pick half
of your children's II the right girl is
willing
If everyone had to pay for the mis-.
takes he makes, there would be fewer
mistakes.
Money talks-and sometimes the
man who marries it finds that it talks
too much.
All married men should be good lis
teners-all happily marred men are.
Crops, ducks and umbrellas should
not be raised without rain.
Not more than a cent word is
often paid for articles on how to be
successful.
A woman who wears paste dia-
monds is much more apt to be proud
than one with the real tiara.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22
Accounted For.

Among the many stories told OF the
Scottish judge, Lord Young, is one as.
sociated with an election in Edin.
burgh. when II was announced that
Lord Wolmer had been returned by .
majority of three votes. Later a cor.
rection made the majority 800. and
gave the names of two lords of ses.
sion who had voted for the successful
candidate. Lord Young. thereupon re
marked: That accounts for the two
ciphers"
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22

The extraordinary popularity of fne
white goods this summer makes the
choice of Starch matter of great i'm
portance. Defiance Starch, being free
from all injurious chemicals, is the
only one which is safe to use on fine
fabrics. Its great strength as stiffener
makes half the usual quantity OF Starch
necessary, with the result Of perfect
finish, equal to that when the goods
were new.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22
PRIVILEGES OF A GENTLEMAN.
Youngster Probably Will Change Ideas
in Course Of Time.

There is a small boy in this town.
says the Baltimore American, the
son of a rather distinguished lawyer,
who has decided opinions on what
constitutes true aristocracy. One day
recently q friend called upon his
mother. and, while waiting for the
hostess, was entertained by the small
boy.
What are you going to do when
you grow up?" was the stereotyped
question she propounded in the effort
to start the conversation.
"Oh, ! am going to smoke"
"Yes7"
And chew"
"Oh!"
And gamble"
Indeed"
And swear"
Really"
And drink corn whisky"
And why are you going to do such
things?" asked the visitor aghast.
'Oh. all southern gentlemen do
them"
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22
That New Flat.

Bifkins and his wife are bucking
the domestic tiger these days, having
just moved into their first and only
little home!
Sunday they went out for a consti-
tutional along the lake.
After writing in the sand, listening
TO the roar of the waves, watching
the children romping on the strand
and eating their fill of crackerjack,
they turned toward "the dearest little
fat on the North Side" satisfied.
At the door Bifkins searched for his
keys in vain.
Then as they stood there looking
into each others eyes, he remembered
leaving the much missed jinglers in
his Office desk, seven miles away!
Bifkins and his wife had heard
much about burglars and had taken
due precaution against invasion, hence
they were irrevocably and helplessly
locked out!
When Bifkins had telephoned the
office for messenger boy, they sat
down on the steps and waited.
Then they waited some more!
After going across the street to Sc
lect an emergency place for camping
out, they waited again!
Did you notice that nice soft place
in the grass over there's? interrupted
Bifkins., Excuse me minute, l be-
lieve III go over and turn in!"
1t was dark now; very dark.
Bifkins went over to the drug store
and telephoned again.
boy left with your keys an hour
ago." came the answer from the office.
Then they waited some more!
Dear" said Bifkins, in a low con-
tralto voice, dear, this being Sun
day night, / believe that messenger
boy has stopped on the way to see
his girl. L" But Mrs Bifkins
would have no more of it. There is
very little Indian blood in her and
she wanted to get into her dear little
home again.
AFTER a long, long time, the boy
came.
Then they entered their fiat-and
discovered they had gone out that
afternoon and left the back door open!
There are times when words are in
adequate! This was one of the times.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22

ney disease and
rheumatism laid me
up off and on for
ten years. Awful
pains started from
the kidneys and
C rsed dow n
through my limbs.
] sought the best
medical treatment
but in vain, and
when l began using
Doan's Kidney Pills
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22
Were He a Bird.

With an ugly sneer he tossed aside
the bread which she had made with
her own hands.
IF l were only an ostrich" he be-
gan.
But the young woman cut him
short.
Yes. IL you only were," she
snapped, then / might get at least
a few decent feathers for that old hat
I've worn since my wedding days
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22
ALMOST A SOLID SORE.
Skin Disease from Blrth--Fortuns
Spent on Her Without Bensfit--
Cured Her with Cuticurs.

Il have cousin in Rockingham Co.
who once had skin disease from her
birth until she was six years Of age.
Her father had spent a fortune on her
to get her cured and none Of the treat.
ments did her any good, Old DR.. -
suggested that he try the Cuticura
Remedies which he did. When he com.
menced to use II the child was almost
solid scab. He had used il about two
months and the child was well. ]
could hardly believe she was the same
child. Her skin was as soft as baby's
without scar on it. have not seen
her in seventeen years, but ] have
heard from her and the last time !
heard she was well. Mrs. w. +. 1ngle,
Burlington, N. c.. June l6, 1906"
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22
Jumpers.

Il want to look at some of your
jumpers" said the workman. entering
the department store.
Frog department, sixth floor. cen
ter isle" replied the fioorwalker, tap
ping his teeth with his pencil
Yonkers Statesman.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22

was walking with two canes and suf-
fering continual pains, headaches and
sleepless nights. l improved quickly
and after taking three boxes felt bet
ter than had for 15 years. The eff
fects have been lasting"
Sold by all dealers. so cents box.
Foster Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22

With smooth iron and Defiance
Starch, you can launder your shirt
waist just as well at home as the
steam laundry can; it will have the
proper stiffness and finish, there will
be less wear and tear Of the goods,
and it will be positive pleasure to
use Starch that does not stick to the
iron
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22

She-Oh, because!
That an article may be good as we'll
as cheap, and give entire satisfaction,
is proven by the extraordinary sale of
Defiance Starch. each package con-
tanning one-third more Starch than
can be had OF any other brand for the
same money.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22

NJ. c. Russi. Of Andermath, who has
just celebrated his one hundred and
first birthday, is the Oldest Alpinist in
the world. Last summer he scaled the
Gutsch mountain without assistance.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22

Lewis Single Binder straight SC cigar.
Made of extra quality tobacco. Your
dealer or Lewis Factory. Peoria. III.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22
It Cures While You WAX.

Aliens FootEase is certain cure for
hot, sweating, callous, and swollen, aching
feet. Sold by all Druggists. Price 25c. Don't
accept any substitute Trial package FREE.
Address Allen s. Olmsted, lie Roy, ". Y.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22
Chance Not 10 BE Missed.

One day the Office boy went to the
editor of the Soaring Eagle and said:
There is a tramp at the door, and
he says he has had nothing to eat for
six days.
Fetch him in," said the editor. III
we can find out how he does 1t we can
run the paper for another week."
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22

1orm OF pimpleS ana pIack neaos, WnAo
Psoriasis comes in scaly. patches on difer4
ent parts Of the body One Of the worst
forms OF skin trouble Is Salt Rheum
its favorite point OF attack Is the scalp,l
sometimes causing badness. Poison 0al(
and Ivy are also disagreeable types Of skim
disease. The humor producing the trouble
lies dormant in the blood through the!
Winter to break out and torment the
sufferer with the return of Spring. The besS
treatment for all skin diseases Is S. S. S.f
1t neutralizes the acids and removes the
humors so that the skin instead of being
irritated and diseased, Is nourished by .
supply Of fresh, healthy blood. External
applications of salves, washes, lotions, etc.
while they soothe the itching caused BY
skin affections, can never cure the trouble
nod. S. S. S. goes down into the circulation
oreign matter and restores the blood to ito
, permanently curing every form OF skin
es and any medical advice desired sent free
sale at all first class drug stores.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22

Many a woman averages things up
by figuring that her $2S bonnet and
her husbands 81 lid average SIS each.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22
Wanted an Excuse.

What do you take when you're
coming down with a cold7"
Whisky"
"Wife object?"
Certainly not. She doesn't want
me to be sick?"
"One more question"
"Well?"
What's the easiest way to start .
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22

II takes almost as many tailors 10
induce him to pay for the job.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22

suffered with Ecxena %. forty
years and could md nothing to
cure me until ! tried 3. 8. 3. I
su1Rered intensely with the ttch.
ing and burntngi pustules would
sticky duid; crusts % would come on
the skin aad. when scratched. on
the skin was left as raw a. . piece
Of beef. ! suffered agony In the
long years /! yas smictsd, but
feet cure. There has never been
d. II. EVANS,
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22

ALL UP-T0-DATE HOUsEKEEPERs
Use Red Cross Ball Blue. Ii makes clothes
clean and sweet as when new. All grocers.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22
WHERE DOCTORS FAILED.
An Interesting Case from Salem, the
Capital Of Oregon.

F. A. Sutton. r. F. d. No. 4. Salem.
Oregon, says: Acute attacks of kid
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22

Thrift and stinginess are as simila
as they are different.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22

The worst feature about losing
ones temper is that 1t refuses to stay
lost.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22

Buyers are esteemed good men
dross are deemed.-Chinese.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22
Proving the Point.

Shea woman ought to get credit
for being Just as logical and ready to
give a reason as . man.
He-Why?
She-Oh. because!
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22
pictionary's One Joke.

A Philadelphia contemporary has
discovered joke in a dictionary. 1t
is one of those unconscious bits of hu-
NOR. Under the word question" is
the following: ITO pop the question:
see pop"
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1907-08-22
Garden Spot Of the World
This Fifty Describes That Portion Of Texas Lying
Between San Antonio and the Gulf.
vou Can Buy Truck Fruit Farm Of from 10 Acres TO $40 Acres and
Two Choice Town Lots for S2l0. Terms $40 Month
Without interest Read the Following:
Hutchinson, Kansas, March IL, 1907.

Hutchinson, Kansas
Dear SmI 7h n
f.. ranch in County,,
all ALI
full days of hard riding horseback this ranch
! ranch
for land told
the ranch he directed
days hard riding l fully
aw quarters a mile of
il to be
very all
8 enoughw
900 land. Headquarters
] found the a black a reda nd all the
and n eoloo to
when Iseeit
b printed rsandex xmined the
Home n and
wD they all there life
the ranch to
that all romS Vac
Brownsville but like
saw in Texas.
sndf wish to to friends and
onespp Youa II
O States
Wishing
truly, A
B. @. "
s6 miles south s.
Antonio literature
Or. CHAS. +. SIMMONS,
ats Alamo Plaza, SAN ANTONIO. TEXAS.
The Bamberg herald. [volume] (Bamberg, S.C.) 1891-1972, 1907-03-07
Got Things Mixed.

It wasn't Missouri editor but a
printers devil who was going
through his first experience on
making up forms. The paper
was late and the boy got the galleys
mixed. The first part of the obitu:
ary notice of a pecunious citizen had
been dumped in the forms, and the
next handful of type came off a gal:
ley describing a recent fire. It read
like this: ''The pail bearers lowered
the body to the grave and as it was
consigned to the flames there were
few if any regrets, for the old wreck
had been an eyesore to the town for
years. Of course there was individ-
ual loss, but that was fully covered
by insurance. The widow thinks
the editor wrote the obituary that
way because the lamented partner
of her joys and sorrows owed him
five years subscription.
The Bamberg herald. [volume] (Bamberg, S.C.) 1891-1972, 1907-03-07
Fire Visits Winnsboro.

W1NNsBoRo, February N.-Mre.
here this morning at 4:30 O'Clock de-
stroyed the three-story brick build.
ing of M. w. Doty, with all the con-
tents.
It is supposed the fire originated
from an explosion Of a lamp left
lighted in the store.
MIR. Doty kept large stock OF.
general merchandise on the ground
floor. On the second floor was the
newly furnished rooms Of the Com
mercial club and DR.. ]. D. McMeek
in's dental Office, and above, on the
third floor, the Knights Of Pythias
and Woodmen of the World had their
lodge rooms. All were In flames
when the alarm was sounded.
The building was one Of the oldest
and most centrally located buildings
in the town, being located opposite
the Winnsboro Hotel.
The building was insured for Sc, COO.
Mr.. Doty had the contents OF the.
store insured for $1,000 and the
Knights of Pythias and the CONNER
cial Club carried insurance, which
will nearly cover the loss Of about
S2,5O0. ~ ss,sss -
The Bamberg herald. [volume] (Bamberg, S.C.) 1891-1972, 1907-03-07
NEGROES FOUND GUILTY.
Drinking Whiskey With White Men
is Bad For "Cufffe."

GAFFNEY, Feb. 28.-John Allison
and Bill Jones both colored, were
convicted in the court of general
sessions here this morning on the
charge Of murder, the killing Of
Erastur Spurlin, a white man, IN
this county sometime ago. The jury
returned verdict of guilty with
recommendation to mercy, which
means that they will be sent to the,
penitentiary for life.
According to the evidence brought
out by the state the two defendants
had been drinking together and they
begged Spurlin for another drink.
He refused their request and they
struck him on the head witha blunt
instrument, killing Spurlin. After
committing the deed they placed the.
dead man on the Southern railway
track to create the impression that
he was killed by train.
The main witness for the prosecu-
ton was Joe Humphries, who was
with Spurlin and the defendants!
Spurlin had a Jug of whiskey and:
they were celebrating a little and
having a good time. After the ne
groes had taken two drinks they ask
ed for third and Spurlin declined,
whereupon they tried to take the
whiskey by force, declaring they
would have it anyway. Spurlin still
protested, and one of the negroes
struck him a blow on the head and
killed him. They took his body and
placed it on the railroad track and
told Humphries if he told on thern
they would do him the same way.
The Bamberg herald. [volume] (Bamberg, S.C.) 1891-1972, 1907-03-07
A New Milking Machine.

A Kansas genius seems to have
solved the milking machine problem.
and apparently has gone beyond
what was asked by the most exactng
dairyman. This second edition Of
Watt, Stevenson, Ampere and Howe.
all rolled into one, has just patented
a device run by an electric motor
fastened on the cows back, the cleo
tricity being genterated by a dynamo
fastened to her tail. It strains the.
milk and hangs up the pail and
strainer. A small phonograph
accompanies the outfit and yelk
"Sor' when the cow moves. 1t she
kicks, a hinged arm catches the milk
stool and lams her over the back
American Farmer. 81
The Bamberg herald. [volume] (Bamberg, S.C.) 1891-1972, 1907-03-07
BAD NEGROES AT ROWEsvlLLE.
Negro Shoots at Officer and His Friends
Take Him from Prison.


TOWNSVILLE, March 3.-The COM
ity was stirred up last night when a
colored man by the name of Jake
Bonaparte resisted arrest and in the
scuffie wrested a revolver from the
officer and fired at him without hit
ting him.
Jake Bonaparte was employed at
the J. L. Blake Lumber company S
mill as log turner and came to
Rowesville from Sumter last sum-
mer. While he had never been un-
der arrest, he was always to be found
standing around when there was
trouble going on and he had the
reputation of being a sullen negro.
Last night he was standing on the
sidewalk of Main street about 8
o'clock and was amusing himself by
pushing other negroes from the walk
when Alderman George H. Inabinett
came out of the store where he is
employed and attempted to place
Jake under arrest. The man resisted
and the officer attempted to strike
the man over the head with the butt
of his gun and it was wrested from
his hand by Jake, who then fired at
the officer and missed him. He then
ran and the officers of the town, who
are the mayor and aldermen, started
out with a posse of citizens to run
him down. They went to the cabin
Of Ak Martin, where they had
reason to think that he had hidden and
the woman Of the house barred the
door against them and would pot
allow them to enter. They forced
the door by putting their shoulders
against it and the door fell in on the
woman and her one week old babe
and other children. They did not
find the man they wanted, but did
find that he went through the yard a
few minutes before they were there.
The party returned to town and later
Officers Henry Wolf, w. B. Bell, II.
B. Mazyck and Robert Fairey went
to the cabin of Rosie Jones, where
they knew ''hot supper was to be
served and waiting in the woods out
side the cabin saw the man they
wanted, who walked into their arms
and was placed under arrest without
trouble. He did not have the gun
that it was known that he had in his
hand when he ran away. He claim
ed to have thrown it away. He was
placed in the guard house and when
Sunday morning came he was miss
ing. Friends had wrenched the lock
from the door and released him:
Jake Bonaparte is a big round faced
negro about 25 years of age and
weighs in the neighborhood Of 200
pounds.
While Officer Inabinett was not hit
by the bullet, his hand was hurt by
the wrench which was given to it
when the gun was torn away from
hiy,,
The Bamberg herald. [volume] (Bamberg, S.C.) 1891-1972, 1907-03-07
Pitched Battle With Blacks.

AUGUSTA, GA, March 3.--In a
pitched battle just before daybreak
this morning, squad of policemen
exchanged more than 20 shots with
a gang of negro gamblers barricaded
in house on Thomas street. The
officers charged the front door, gain
ed entrance in the face Of shotgun
fire, fatally wounded a negro named
Reuben Dunno, and captured several
others. None Of the policemen was
injured. The lights were all put
out in the beginning of the melee,
and this is supposedly the reason why
most Of the police shots went wild.
The Bamberg herald. [volume] (Bamberg, S.C.) 1891-1972, 1907-03-07
Defines Penalty of Bigamy.

!! Lord Russell, a famous jurist, once
went to Scotland to help the Liber-
ais in a campaign, says the Kansas
City Journal. He purposely began
his speech with a few sentences OF
bad Scotch. and then, when the con:
fusion caused by the blunder had
subsided, he said:
Gentlemen, I do not speak Scotch,
but / vote Scotch, and l often drink
Scotch" He was greeted with tire.
mendous applause.
When Russell was a young man he
was sitting in court listening to 9
trial of bigamy. A friend leaned
across to him and asked: Russell,
what is the extreme penalty for big
amy?"
1.-TWO mothers-in-law," was the
reply.
The Bamberg herald. [volume] (Bamberg, S.C.) 1891-1972, 1907-03-07
Dog Saves q Rabbit.

A sportsman, on the Huntsham es-
tate, North Devon, had a rabbit
brought to him by his spaniel, which
had caught it under a hedge.
The rabbit could walk only very
feebly, though all its limbs were
found to be sound. It its mouth,
however, was thick twig about
three inches long, which had become
wedged in behind the teeth in the
rabbits rush from some threatened
danger. The animal was unable to
extract the twig with its paws and
was being gradually starved to death
when it was found by the dog.
The Bamberg herald. [volume] (Bamberg, S.C.) 1891-1972, 1907-03-07
Hartzog Happenings.

HARTzoG;; March 5.-Farmers are
hauling phosphate now, but the
bridge across Edisto River has been
undergoing repairs and not much has
been hauled.
Mr.. and Mrs. N. R. Rhoad visited
their son, Mr.. Frank Rhoad, last
Saturday and Sunday at Rufin.
Miss Bette Steedly is very sick,
also Mrs. D. B. Smoak.
There is to be a pindar shelling at
Mr.. N. R. Rhoad's tonight.
Rev. J. R. Smith was not able to
fill his appointment at Hunters Chap
ell on Sunday.
No corn has been planted in this
neighborhood yet, and farmers had
best wait awhile, for thunder clouds
in February denotes frost in April.