The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-12-26

my story? Not much make a grad
ual approach, looking around me as I
do so, and when close enough 1 OBJ
serve:
Madam, there was a time when I
had money in plenty, and IL had
come across your villa at that time 1
should certainly have tried to induce
you to part wit it?'
See? / give her to understand that
have met with financial reverses. All
sorts of human beings like to hear
that some one else has met with mis-
fortune. Again, / refer to the house
as villa. Don't you imagine she
isn't on to the word. She was scowl-
villa business brings a smile. Before
it can come off 1 have suggested sew
eral romantic names for the property,
and wondered that some millionaire
hasn't come along with an offer. That
breaks the ice and the rest is easy.
She sits me down to the dining room
table and puts on a cold spread, and
when I have eaten she begins to ask
questions. Have ever been rich?
How did 1 lose my money? Did the
loss of it start me on the tramp?
well, I lie. I lie Sticky and
smoothly and entertainingly. do 1t in
repayment for my food. By and by
the husband comes up from the field
and she whispers a few words in his
ear and he is all right. I am asked
to stay all night, given a place at the
table with the family and go away in
the morning feeling like a human be-
ing once more. Where is the harm ?
Both of US are benefited by my being
a good liar.
you can't divert a farmer of the
idea that a tramp has at some time
escaped hanging by a narrow margin,
nor his wife and daughters of the Idea
that there is a romance back of 1t all
The more you try to do it the more
they will think you are lying. One Of
my favorite characters with the farm
er is that / was reprieved on the gal
lows for a murder laid at my door, but
which was finally found to be a case
of suicide after L had served ten years
of life sentence. Say. now, but when
have had five or six Uncle Reubes
as an audience / have brought out the
goose flesh in a way to do me proud.
The gallows scene is what may be
called the third act of the play. 1 am
visited in my call by a minister. He
walks with me to the gallows. 1 mount
with steady step. knowing that 1 am
innocent. The moose bangles for me,
but the hangman waits while address
the gathering. 1 protest my innocence
and declare that the real criminal will
sooner or later be discovered. By the
time have stepped back and signalled
to the hangman that am all ready to
wing my flight I've got those Uncle
Reubes hitching all over the corn
field.
Then comes the pardon, and my
listeners are breathing like horses
drawing a heavy load up hill. I tell
OF years spent in prison, a fortune ex-
hausted in following clues, and the |
lawyer who has believed in my inno-
cence right along finally enters my cell
with a pardon just as 1 am about to
cut my throat with a piece of glass; |
I've told that story to half a dozen |
men in a barn, and the silence would |
be so profound that you could hear an
old graSShOpper moving about on the |
hay next to the roof. I've told 1t In
front of the big fireplace, with jug |
of cider and a pan of apples for trim |
mings, and made the family SO nerv- |
Gus that no one dared to go to bed.
with the women l have passed as
a husband hunting for faithless wife |
and mother to rescue my child from |
her clutches and again as single |
man who gave young woman all MS
love only to find himself deceived.
There's a joy about either one of them !
to the average woman. They like to |
hear of the failures among their own
sex For more than 200 miles in north /
arn New York state 1 passed as the |
Baron Hasserman of Germany, whose
wife had eloped with the leader of a
little German band. 1 wanted to over
haul them to secure possession OF my
two year old daughter, and l had a
curl of her golden hair to exhibit For
six weeks I lived on the fat of the land.
Then a cock-eyed country constable
VINO had Jailed me three years before !
came along and spoiled my game. /
wasn't conscience stricken, however.
lad lied like son of a gun, but it
vas smooth, entertaining lying, and
I'll bet those people are waiting and !
wishing for me to come along again.
mo. don't think of it. 1 mean If
you are thinking of going on the tramp
lon't do it unless you are good liar
md have the dignity to carry 1t on.
Failure awaits any other sort of
an."-(Copyrighted)
~A -A uaEFNNE