The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1907-08-18

Cinderella had a Fairy Godmother;
Aladdin had a Wonderful Lamp; Isl
dore Belchatosky had an Uncle Abra-
ham. Uncle Abraham combined the
power of the genii with the complais-
ance of the godmOther, and was fur
Their distinguished by settled place of
residence and a distracting generosity
of cast-off clothes The more purely
mythical persOnages, with accounts of
whose beneficence Miss Bailey was
wont to entertain her charges, were
not entirely convincing. Giants, genii,
fairies, conversational animals might
or might not be; but who could ques-
ton the existence of IsidOre's Uncle
Abraham? Excerpts of his views upon
men and events adorned Isidore Bel
chatosky's conversation and examples
of his taste in gents furnishings"
adorned IsidOre Belchtosky's person.
The speckled vest which shrouded
Isidore's form had once belonged to
Uncle Abey. 1t was crossed by a steel
watch chain, the gift of Uncle Abey.
It's pocket waited-open-mouth
a fat and noisy watch, promised by
Uncle Abey The bold plaid trousers
which reached from IsidOre's ankles to
his armpits, and showed so pleasingly
through the opening of the speckled
vest, had but lately graced the limbs
of Uncle Abey.
These is nicer nor that velvet suit
you used to wear" said Patrick Bren-
nan, judiciously. Them was sissy
clothes"
These is fer mans suits" Isidore
proudly informed him. Il gets 'em
from of of mine Uncle Abey. The lady
by our floor she makes pants fer her
little boy nit the legs, and 1 puts me
on init the rest"
Your uncle could to be awful big"
commented Morris Mogilewsky.
Sure is he big"
rs he high?"
Sure is he high. Like a house is he
high"
"Und fat?"
He is fat like blocks from houses"
Did you ever" asked Patrick, "see
Father Burke over to st. Mary's? Is
your uncle as fat as him?"
'Fatter," IsidOre maintained. Say,
you open me the back of this waist
ind l shows you how is mine uncle
fat"
Morris undid the buckle: Isidore re-
moved safety pins and shook out reefs
until the vest hung, in voluminous
folds, to its extinguished wearer's
knees.
Fill it up from coats" he COM
manded. "und you could to see how is
mine Uncle Abey fat"
1t was recess time. The yard was
swarming with little boys, and the dis
crepancy in girth between Isidore and
his uncle was soon overcome. Coats,
caps, mUfflers. even luncheOns. were
pressed into service, until Isidore, look
ing like the most backward tilted of
pouter pigeons, turned to Patrick.
Mine uncle is fat like that" said
he. Il guess nobody in that world
could to be fat how mine Uncle Abbey
is"
You Her' cried Patrick Brennan.
mo Sheeny could be as fat as a
priest
You lier' retorted Isidore; mine
Uncle Abey is"
WhereupOn they fought. 1t was a lit
tie unfortunate that the bell should
have rung just then, and that the
owners of IsidOre's embOnpOints should
have forcibly and hurriedly reclaimed
it. For Patrick's science was upset by
the alarming shrinkage of his op-
ponent. while Isidore's aim and nerve
were disturbed by frequent, even by
simultaneous. tugs at his person. The
relative avoirdupOis of priest and Le--
wife was still undetermined when a
large monitor dragged the kicking
them to Miss Bailey, their long-suffer-
ing teacher.
Mine uncle is fatter," Isidore per-
sisted, even when Miss Bailey had con-
signed him to the corner near the book
case. He's fatter'n blocks from
houses und punches from priests
Then why don't ne come round ?'
taunted Patrick from durance vile I'M
der the desk. why don't he never
come round?'
He's COMM" said IsidOre, who
knew that he was lying.
You lie!' said Patrick, who guessed
it.
Say. teacher cried Eva Gonorow-
sky, In whose care-fOr their greater
debasement-these two rivals for her
favor had been placed. Teacher,
Missis Bailey. Patrick und lizzie begins
NIT themselves some more. They says
they lies"