Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1907-11-07
The SERVANT
PROBLEM

SERVANT pTOuiSlH was dH tOUIly TOT
After years experience have
changed my mind.
I'VE started In first rate" he went
on. running his eye down the Help
Wanted, Female column of the pa
per from force OF habit. "My mother
willed me her old, faithful servant
been with her ever since was a child
the real, old-fashioned kind. she was.
Well, Minnie just stayed long enough
to Justify my pre-nuptial eulogies OF
her cooking, when one evening my
wife came in and remarked on an agi-
tated whisper:
There's a Mr.. Minnie!'
impossible began. when she cut
me short.
Yes. and he's come back. He was
serving term In states prison: but
it's been shortened for good behavior
We'll. we had nothing against Mr..
Minnie, but we couldn't help wishing
when we saw our cook depart, bag and
baggage, that his had been a life sen.
tence.
I'VE next tried working house
keeper She was looking for place,
primarily, to store her vast belongings,
incidentally as cook. We slowed our.
selves compactly into the front OF the,
apartment and left Mrs Adams and
her goods and chattels the rear. Her
regime lasted two days. On the third
having done some washing for herself,
| (she refused to wash for us), she
stepped on the window sill on her re-
| turn from the fire escape, where she
had hung out her wash, and the win
dow sill gave way under her $50
pounds. We found her straddling the
wreck. lamenting that she was injured
for life andA breathing forth dire
threats of damage suits.
| Our next was Olga, who claimed
to have worked for the royal family OF
Sweden. She had an incumbrance In
the shape of four-year-old child, but
| we were desperate. so agreed to the
child. Various adventures marked the
reign of Olga. One night after hard
day at the office / came home to find
a crowd about our door and Olga
standing on the step wringing her
hands and moaning that her child was
lost. offered to try and find the child
II Olga would cease her wailing and
get dinner ready-and was called a
heartless brute for thinking Of dinner
under the circumstances.
II notified the police and then, after
Joining In the search for several hours,
was told by my wife over the telephone
that the child had been found playing
In the back yard. Several incidents OF
this kind reconciled me to the inevi
table departure of Olga, who also had
sort of husband who made periodical
Temperatures in the bosom of his
family.
Next came Old Virginia. regular
southern NANNY who looked to be 81
years old at least She was respect
full old darby and her soft "yassam'
to my wife's directions made pleas
ant contrast to the abrupt manners q
the more modern girls. Every girl has
her day, and this girl OF 30 began t
get downcast toward the end of the
month. Her mother was sick down
south somewhere, and she was afraid
1t was very serious. IL you could have
seen Virginia, with the weight of al
most a century bending down her
shoulders, you would have realized
that any sickness her mother might
have would be almost hopeless at the
advanced age she must have been
Worse news on the very last day OF
the month made 1t compulsory for her
to leave at once for the sunny south.
Mary, the Hungarian. who never
would wear shoes, and went around
In her stocking feet all day, was the
next visitor to our kitchen. Mary did
not look like a belle, but her suitors
were many and at last she succumbed
to one persistent swain. She could not
tell which to choose, as she liked the
man from Hoboken. but did not like
the place, and did not like the man
from the East Side, but did like New
York. She finally chose New York.
mora was the last. She also had
heart strings that were being pulled
from Ireland. A youth who loved her
kept writing her to return to the old
sod, and her old father also joined his
appeals in vain. Nora liked America
and II they could not find courage Ia
follow her she was not going to give
up the land of wine and honey for q
while yet. When she got enough mon
= ey she would return. She made a yer
bal contract to stay with us for three
years. We settled back with a sigh oil
relief. Two weeks later we went tc
the country, in the mountains Of Penn
sylvania. The banshee followed us
for there were no other white servants
there and as there had been an add
ton to our family recently 1t was nee
essary to have Nora along. Nora
would not eat with the colored ser
wants and the house would not provide
separate arrangements for her. Nora
left In high dudgeon and wild tele
grams to my wifes mother brought
her up to help us with the baby till
we could get back to civilization.
"Once more the hunt is on and we
are wildly advertising and running
around in search of some sort of do
nestle that will stay long enough u
pay for the expense of securing her.
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