The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1907-10-27
HIS DAY.
Things That Worried . Wsn Who w"ssAos
Mind the Lusstania's lsitting Hl'".

lie dashed into the uptown corner saloon
at five minutes before midnight. He looked
wrought up. -.
Gimme seven drinks. Jimmie no said
TO the. barkeeper. NO. better make It
seventeen. And hurry
Then he clomped up and down in front 81
the bar, biting on hunks from an nnlightsd
cigar.
seventeen, mumbled a friend OF
the wrought up mar who was standing at
the end OF the bar. What 10 ~ New
garnet
Huh? Oh, hello. there. said the nervous
man. noticing his friend. Nope. No game
ut all. just neeJ tho drinks You're In.
What's yours"
Haven't bean arrested or anything like
| that. nave your inquired the contained
hooking man OF the wrought up one when
tho fabrication was under way.
~Not vet" replied the nervous one. "but
I'm not in bed yet. All I need now TO top
on the day 10 to be pinohed.
-Do you ever stack up against one OF those
go-wrong days--days when You never get
O break from the time you rumble out OF the
bunk in the morning till you crawl back
into II al night? Well. that's what ails me
now.
II wouldn't kick IL ! got hit on tho ankle
bone by the Lusitania. Rut when eighteen
billion little measly sinking setbacks and
pifling botherations-have another: have
three or -four more. 7 think III stay here
all night"
We'll. untsngle it--maybe thatn help
suggested the quiet one.
-Oh. I couldn't remember and go over 10
all IL I had the memory Of an old maid
aunt" said the nervous one. Lets see
how il began. Oh. yes. Soon as ] woke
I'D this morning and turned over to Dol
at the watch I knew that my sciatica was
back with me for an autumnal visit
MY left garter busted on me while ] was
putting on my socks. Then. buttoning my
shoes, the Iestom button Of my right ehos
came OF. II couldn't have beep the top
button. that wouldn't show.
Then ] played some chin golf. I was
trying to do the course in less than q hun
dred. While was doing IL my wife dropped
in and asked me something. ! lost my
count. 7 was 80 annoyed over that that l
ripped nv pelt in fou places.
INC court plaster in the house. Tve
bought about a hundred dollars worth OF
court plaster from buns and beggars during
the past q and brought il all home at
that-but there's never an eighth Of an
inch silver Of court plaster around the
works whom I need it.
There was tea for breakfast instead
Of coffee. My morning paper hadn't come.
neither had tho breakfast rolls. So ]
vampsd quick.
This hall was dark. My stiff hat had
fallen from the hatrack to the hall floor.
! stepped on it and put a hole through it.
brand new lid
Found that the nat elevator was not
running. Had to " alk down seven flights
Of stairs. Then found that the surface
cars were tied up.
Had TO walk five blocks to the elevated.
Missed the express by one-twenty-ninth
No seat in that. Plumbers apprentice
with a carpetsack full OF tools dropped
the tools on my feet. would have licked
him only he looked too husky.
o,s ,No s s~ssns sssa ssI.c %mss ! 70 got the 20 os sss
boy saying that she was sick and ouldn
be down. ~Telephoned for an emergency
photographer. They sent me a pompa-
doured young woman who permitted me
to dictate to her for two hours and then
che wasn't able TO read two lines OF her
"A check that Id been counting on to
reach me- by the morning mail from
Chicago didn't show up. Then a man
walked in on me and canoeIled an option
that he had on q big line OF goods that Id
been trying to unload on him.
walking upstairs TO my once after
lunch-elevators were all too crowded
and I was in a hurry stumbled and
skinned the palms OF both OF my hands
on the corrugated surfaces Of the stair
protectors. NV eyeglasses fell oil at the
same time and both lenses went smash.
dropped around TO the barber shop
on. will your l said to the barber nine
times before he picked up his scissors.
I like EN-. I want EN- TO stick. You'll
remember that. won't your
Explicit enough. wasn't IL? Well. the
Grst thing the barber did was to chop OF
those side locks. Id have knocked the
head of that barber. only | was afraid all
Of his barber pals in the shop might come
at me with rszors and things.
Back to the office, whore ! found that
NV Office boy had got to tinkering with q
cuckoo clock on q rack above my desk and
the whole contraption had ALLEN down or
his head and broken to smithereens.
Then a man dropped In TO tell me that a
motor car that I'd been tipped on could
get at a perfectly foolish bargain had
already been sold TO a man ] hate. Then
my wife telephoned to me that our black
ma~idservant was reeiiDS around the apart
ment In q state Of beastly intoxication.
and she'd sent for the police. and we'd have
to nave dinner downtown.
u telephoned TO her TO meet me down
town. along by J O'Clock, SOS We could have
dinner and then go TO n show thought
had tickets for. She didn't show mp till
half past seven.
when we got to the theatre ! found that
the tickets ia bought for the show we've
not on me I'D left them in another suit.
so I had to buy two more tickets from a
speculator. Had to dig up 81 a throw for
the tickets, and then 7 caught a scat FOR
mine right behind a post.
SHOW wasn't half over before my wife
told me she was suffering from facial neu-
ralRia, and I had to bring her out. Nudcing
along toward the subway. ! was maced by
a ~psnhandler about nine foot high, and
when I told him ! wasn't there with 1t and