davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1907-07-13

The youngest bride who was ever
led to the altar in England, so far as
we can discover, was little Catherine
Apsley, who had only seen four sum
mers when she became the wife Of the
first Earl Bathurst. who was exactly
double her age The tiny ring worn
by Catherine on this occasion, over
two centuries ago, is still preserved.
lord Bathurst survived to see the
e1ghty-third anniversary of his we'd
ding day, while his lady was wife for
seventy-six years.-London Chronicle.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1907-07-13
FORCE OF GRAVITY.
What Our Average Man Would Weigh
on Mars and on the Sun.

on Mars and on the Sun.
If the planet Mars is really inhabited
the people who live there must be an
exceedingly nimble race. The average
weight of a man is about 140 pounds,
but the force of gravity on Mars is so
much less than on the earth that the
40 pound man would weigh only fifty
three pounds if he were transported
there. With such light weight and still
retaining the same strength, an individ-
ual would be able to run with the speed
OF an express train, go skipping over
ten foot walls and do various other
extraordinary things. On the moon
man would be even lighter.
But on the sun our 40 pound man
would have his troubles. Instead OF
being an airy individual he would
weigh in the neighborhood Of a ton and
three-quarters. He would probably
have the greatest difficulty in raising
his hand. for that member would weigh
about 500 pounds
IJIcK-NOw, IL 1 were nUerary 4
would realize somthing on our love
letters.
Dolly don't doubt it.
Dick--What do You think would
realize. my dear?
DOLLY think yon would Pealixs
mat you we're 3 goose.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1907-07-13
Had Noticed 1t.

Church-Did you know that pigs were
afraid of water?
Gotham-Well, noticed today on a
car. when it began to rain, all the end
seat hogs got up in the middle Of the
car.-,Yonkers Statesman.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1907-07-13
Objection Removed.

''You objected to Jack because lie
had to work for living, didn't you,
pamma 2"
Eyes, my dear. He doesn't belong to
our class"
''Well, it's all right now. May he call
tonight?"
elias some one left him fortune?"
''No, but he's lost his Job. ''-Cleve
land Leader
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1907-07-13
Gonnod,s Progress.

GAS you advance further in your
art" said Gouuod to young poet,
''you will come to think of the great
poets of the past as 1 now appreciate
the great musicians of former times
When l was your age I used to say
T. at twenty-five SAID L and Mozart
at forty, Mozart and l. now l say
Mozart"
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1907-07-13
wanted Some of the Same.

A little boy was taken by his father
into a cafe for dinner AS they were
eating their dessert the father handed
the waiter "a bill, which that worthy
carried to the cashiers desk, returning
presently with little pile of change
Oh a silver plate. Robby's eyes grew
bright. ooh, papa" he said, I'D like
a plate of that too!'-New York Her
aid
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1907-07-13
Familiar With His Habits.

First Disconsolate Widow-Are you
going to the mediums tonight to see if
you can get a message from your hus-
band? Second Disconsolate Widow
No, it isn't any use tonight. Saturday
night was always the night when he
went off to spend his salary.-Solner-
vile Journal.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1907-07-13
CARD or THANKS.

We desire to express our gratitude
Co tia nsighbors anI friend who so
kindly aided Us with words of sym
patty and loving deeds at the
time Of our bereavement.
Ma. Av0 Mas. Gao. L. Cooley AND
FAMILY
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1907-07-13

Instead Oft sallying forth and
whooping- ing her-up OF the Fourth
President Roosevelt remained tran
quill IN his abode at Oyster Bay. Is
his desire for things and conditions
strenuous petering outl
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1907-07-13

The fact that La Crosse boy is
getting 1915 PSF month as base
ball player should not turn the am
bition Of every young man to that
field Of endeavOr, but may be
taken as an Illustration of the prin-
cl2ie that it pays TO be able to do
one thing well.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1907-07-13

The Wisconsin legislature made
an appropriation of $125, 900 for
buildings ami equipment of a binder
Irvine factory in connection with
the states prison at Waupua, the
labor to oe performed by convicts.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1907-07-13

It becomes smore apparent each
year that theHbest the nation can
do in respect to Fourth of July trag-
edies is grin and bear it.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1907-07-13
Nature Versus Art.

Gentlemen" Numbered the en-
ergetic lecturer, I'VE live in pessimistic
times. Our. leading politicians, our
pulpit orators, our great philosophers,
our poets, and. worst OF all, our
noveEsts, delight to picture life as
hideous nightmare, a crooked dream,
a thing not worth the misery eX-
pended in enduring a low scramble
for human supremacy, or as an ig-
noble failure at best. And, gentlemen.
are they right? Is it indeed so? Are
we really sinking in the scale of civil
cation? Nature is nature, and we are
her children: nature is good and wise
and beautiful and true; nature. en-
mobiles us, and makes us free from
guile and deceit"
Here there was. stir in the au-
dience
Hold on, guv'nor Look herer
shouted a man who had been intently
listening. This is my wig, and these
my false teeth, and this my glass eye
What about them, ell? What sort OF
a fright would l be without themi
They lick nature all to pieces, 1 can
tell you You hold on a bitr'-Ti'
Bits.
rne man who persists IN planting I'll
small potatoes will get just what he
n190tS
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1907-07-13
The ChiIIinu Reply,

According to a Washington
light. there are times when a
regrets the use Of an illustration
q momeat before has appeared es
~ felicitous.
"The argument of my learne
brilliant colleague" said couns
the plaintiff in a suit for damage
a railway company, lis like the
now falling outside-it is Sc
here, there and everywhere
Whereupon opposing counsel !
ed his opportunity. Cali l cal
he hastily interposed, sis that t
tleman who has likened my ar
to the snow now falling outsi
neglected to observe one little
which I, fiatter myself the sir
extends-it has covered all the
In a very short time" -Harper's
"
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1907-07-13

We always value the strawberry tie
most just as II takes its departure 30
other berry quite takes its place.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1907-07-13
Got What She Wanted.

Notwithstanding the furry al
hacking houses and a few othe
lions of national Importance, t
bill is always a topic of conve
here.
They we're talking about it
lobby of the house. "Well," Sc
rcsentive Fred lands, 81 gus
president got about what it v
"Sure," replied Representa-
field. "Ie got what he wanted
the girl did who was travelling
Eco. She could no. speak Spar
she wanted some milk. She
make the waiter understand,
drew a picture of a cow on a
paper. The waiter understood
He bought her ticket for
Eight"
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1907-07-13

The use of salt on the hay viii not
prevent the green clover from burning
I'D your barn. Some fox thus il vi
''She bosses him saG'y. do,sn't r =
"Not since he learned to anti. .q ta
al Of her wishes. "-Cleveland Plain
dealer.
Every month about 300 articles
are left in the Berlin street cars b!
their owners, about 600 of them being
women's purses.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1907-07-13

had stopped for her when the man she
was to marry was killed in railroad
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1907-12-20
The Cause Of the smash-up.

The old darby was suing the railroad
company for damages. The man con-
tended that not being warned by
whistle CT engine bell he had started to
drive his rig across the company's
track when a shunted box car Of said
company crashed into his outfit, caus-
ing the death of the horse, loss of the
wagon and minor injuries to himself.
After the prosecution had closed its
side of the case, the company's law
yer called h old darby to the stand
and Went at MIN.
MI. Lamson." he began, your rig
was struck by the box car in full day
light, was it not?'
Il fink dar was some clouds oya-
head, suh," answered the caviling Wit
ness.
"Never mind the clouds! And only
a few days before this accident the
railroad company had put a new sign
at that crossing?"
Oar was a sign dar. ya-as, subj"
And didn't that sign say stopl
Look! Listen'?"
Now. dar am de who'll accusation uh
de trouble declared the darby, with
animation. "If lat Stop sign hadn't
caught dis chile's eye jes' S An Wal
squar' ON dat track, dar wouldn't "a
been no smash-up!"
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1907-12-20
Curator in the United States Mint at Philadelphia Says That ST
Gaudens Did Not Use an irish Girls Face for the Indian
Head--Eagle Is Shown True to Life and the lnscrip-
tions Are Especially Harmonious With the
Remainder Of the Coin.

the two coins side by side in the same
light II note the difference. We cam
not expect him to treat the eagle ar
tistically II then spoil the effect with
an inscription done in the manner OF
the sign painter.
Value Mark Not Essential.
The statement of value, ten doll
lars" With the two words close together
in correct biographical style, is much
less prominent than on Others of our
'oms This has been pointed out by
some as a serious defect. 1t is, how
ever, in h same style as the other in
scrlptlons. The artistssaw no reason to
give it special prominence and therein
he Was entirely correct. Statements Of
value might we'll be eliminated from all
our gold coins and the omission would,
by removing details, leave a simpler
and more attractive type-or rather,
make an attractive type more easily
obtainable.
The ancients, with their enormous
coinages. each of the hundreds of cities
having its own, got along without
marking, with rare exceptions, the
value on their coins; our English
friends experience no inconvenience
with the omission of it from their gold
pieces and from the silver crown and
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1907-12-20

Indianapolis, Spccial:-ReV- y. G.
Beckett, pastor of q prosperous church
at Galveston, Cass county, has brought
the stage and church together in an
effort TO reach sinners. and has sue
ceeded so we'll tina other northern In
diana pastors are studying his meth
DDS with a view to applying them in
their own work.
The first step was the organization
of a dramatic club. and Rev. Beckett,
his Wife and their daughter enrolled
their names as members. TO contine
the membership to church members or
commandments or even TO c~hurchgoers
would. the pastor thought. fail in ac-
complishins of his purpose. for it was
the outsider, the men and wo1len. the
boys III girls, not identified with
Christian work that he was after. Any
person who Il q taste for 1heatricals
was invited to hccom n member.
Hoped for Religious Results.
With the formation of the club and
the purchase of stage scenery the pas
tor further outlined his He
said the club would MI a natural de-
sire for amusement. but at the same
time it's efforts should be In the direc-
ton, of the moral, the religious and
the elevating things of life.
Eor months Rev. Mr.. Beckett had been
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1907-12-20

During his stay in the United States
Minister WI was quick to adopt our
customs. He learned to ride "A bicycle,
ne kept a firm grip OF the steering
gear OF a bright new automobile. he de-
iiVered rmo in the clutches and
he dotted on American food, cooked. of
course, by q Chinese chef.
He asked questions. All high class
or1entals ask questions. and as a hui
man interrogation point WI was second
only to LII Hung Chang, which is put
uns him on Il Very high plane. He was
on ms way from Washington to Phila-
delphia. The train made the usual
stops. and at different stations three
brides We're lifted aboard by affection
ate brldegrooms in the usual shower of
rice and OLD shoes. Minister WI grew
curious. He sought out one of the
young women ana introduced himself.
one thing about WI: he wasn't af-
hicted with shyness.
rs this the first time you'ye been
on a bridal tour?' he asked, and before
the reply could come he had hurled
many more Very pointed questions to-
ward her.
tle learned a whole lot about brides
that day. but one of them Will never
forgive him for his final question.
Pointing TO the bridegroom, Who was
wabbllng down the aisle for a drink.
he grew brave and remarked half TO
himself:
is it really true that you left your
nome for that"
DisIikcd Professional Women.
He did not like the professional wona-
an, and when he met female doctors
and things he spoke right Il in meet
ing. 1t was his humAle opinion that
a woman lawyer was quite worthless,
he advised them all to get married.
AS he put it, There is no reason why
you should not get married. and there
is no good reason why you should prac-
tice law
People asked him to give them his au-
tograph with some sentiment in Chi
nese characters. WI always complied.
Numerous recipients overcome by their
curiosity had the sentiments trans
laled. All We're very personal. What
q funny red nose this woman has" "an
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1907-12-20

New Haven. Conn. Specil; Almost
every MAJ who. since the early Sos,
has been a student at Yale has known
and liked Hannibal, q negro, who was
buried in the little cemetery at West
willie.
AS the only member Of his race who
ever taught a class In the university
and as a campus character Nc G. W.
Hannibal Silliman held a place in the
college traditions to which there can
be no successor.
Graduatesreturningto commencement
each year have sought out the old ne
gro from whom in other days they took
boxing lessons or from whom they
bought Incompatible home made cam
dies. AT the thcater, where no suspen.
sion of the free list ever affected him.
he would approach a nan and woman
whose fathers and mothers perhaps
had been among his customers Of an
ether generation.
NJ and Mrs. So and So.'' he would
say, bowling very low, II beg leave to
ask II you would like to invest by pur-
chasing from me q package of my nice.
superior, old fashioned. homemade
lemon drops"
Almost as good was H%annibars Lat
in. Although he had never pursued
any fixed course Of study, his long ac-
q%uaintance with Naledictories a
given him II snattering Of thc tongue
Of Horace. This smattering, attenC-
ated though it a Hannibal put to
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1907-12-20
WI TING FANG, RETURNING TO
AMERICA, IS A REFORMEF
Started Boycott Against America Because of Exclusion. But Had
Changed the Execution Act in China.-Pointed
Question for Brides--t1is Stories.

Washington, Special: When, in 1902,
WI Ting Fang was recalled to China,
there to enter the foreign office in a
minor capacity. he summed up his long
fight against Chinese exclusion in these
words:
If you allow Chinese to come here
your trade will be vastly increased
That didn't look much like a threat.
but, according to his enemies. what WI
meant was, "if you do not allow
Chinese to come here your trade will
suffer-" and that is why he is charged
with being the real head behind the
Boycott which cost America millions of
dollars.
WI was a bitter opponent Of Chinese
exclusion. He delivered scores of
speeches against it. and he wrote
scores of essays to prove that it was "a
wrong policy for the United States to
pursue. Once he got into an argument
with Mayor Phelan. of San Francisco,
and his version of the incident put
it this way:
Il made him go way back off the
earth and sit down. l shook my fist
in his face. l pitched into him. ! cor
nered him. He couldn't answer"
Sad Day for WI.
1t was n a day FOR WI when he
went away. He frankly admitted hat
it was a demotion. but there was Il
great Work to be Gone In emma n
perhaps he could aid his country bet
ter at home.
Outside Of his alleged engineering
of the boycott, he did very well owe
there. He induced the dowager en-
press to institute reforms for criminals,
and how DIX are not sliced to death,
once so very popular. Then, TOO, in
stead of having their heads chopped
off with a big sword, criminals are
simply strangled. which certainly is
commendable. Branding, too, is abol-
ished. All this is due to the kindly
WI.
At the same time he busted himself
working out some of the details in
the new constitution China is preparing
to adopt, and he has taken a few
western ideas. Incidentally. he has
beer looking up u few of his old time
enemies.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1907-12-20
PASTOR TEACHING MORALS
BY STAGE PERFORMANCES
"Dot, a Miners Daughter, or a Glass OF Wine, Wins Vote
Against Saloon Where Preaching F.iled--Stage
and Scenery.

making n fight against the saloons. but
many of the voters held aloof ana re-
fused 10 Sign Il IemonStraIce. n
dramatic club then produced arthur
Eus1ace. or, a Mothers Love" on the
stage in it's first and n of its most
successful efforts. When the voters
witnessed the fan of young Eustace be-
cause his father had rented a building
for Il saloon ovcr the protests of the
wife and mother. public sentiment was
reNolutionized and there was a STAN
pede of voters to the minister's house
to sign the remonstrance against th.
saloon.
Another Temperance Drama.
dot. Il Miners Daughter; or a Glass
OF Wine. was another drama that was
presented With much success by the
club and which went far to confirm
the temperance sentiment and fix the
little town irreNocably in it's antagon-
ism to the saloon.
The club has made q financial as we'll
as a moral or religious record. The
stage and stage settings have all been
aid for. and Il few days ago the club
purchased q piano and presented it to
the church. Other ministers are look
ing at the work and in other towns the
stage is to be made an adjunct to the
church ~
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1907-12-20
4E pI,,r;hu. II,n-

e Pluribus Unum."
While the religious motto, Of which
more anon, has been omitted, the ma
tional motto. "E Pluribus Unum," that
so happily crystalizes our notions OF
the union composed of semi-sovereign
states, is given its proper place and
due prominence. This important motto
has been omitted from some of our
coins altogether and has been mis-
placed on others. 1t has nothing to do
With our sentiments of liberty and
Therefore should not appear on the OBJ
verse along with the type of liberty,
as ON tine dollar. 1t does characterize
our notions Of the just balance between
the states and the central government
:tna therefore should be placed, as on
the new coin, on the type bearing the
nam" of the country and the emblem
of its power. 1t expresses. too, Il liv-
ing sentiment and deserves. therefore.
To be put into legible form ans not all
most concealed i'll tiny types on a
rlbbon
The motto occupies the space above
the eagle and is so disposed as to con-
form nicely to the form Of the space.
Frequently on the medals OF Pisano,
the worlds greatest medallist, one inds
the inscriptions treated in exactly the
same way. and lie same is true of
many antique coins of unuuestioueG
beauty.
lin God W. Trust"
The omission of the religious motto
is having Il disquieting effect on some
people. The presidem, courageously as
sumes the responsibility and gives his
reasons. 1t would not be i'm the least
surprising if the original suggestion
came from the artist. who found that
it would overload the design. If so did
al tistic sense and common sense agree?
When one considers the origin of re-
ligious notices on coins it seems
strange that the practice should appeal
! TO Americans AS for. 81 nlO1non tn1ar,
able. For religious notices nave usual
~ appeared on money as Il widespread
proclamation Of the divine right of the
king on to impose upon his subjects and
conceal from them the real character
of Il r%eprobate monarch. And the more
vicious the character of the hypocrite
the more %unctuous is his statement Of
belief in Divine guidance and his own
divine agency.
The motto was not placed on our
mand for the formal recognition OF
Deity in that crude n blatant manner,
In 1861 the Rev. NJ. II. Watkinson, Of
Ridleyville. Pa, addressed a letter to
Secretary Chase suggesting a recogni-
ton of Goo in some form on the coins;
Mr.. Chase accepted the idea and or
dered Il motto Of some sort to be add
ed. After rejecting several forms, in
GLIDING the Rev. MIR. Wilkinson's sug-
gestion Of God. Liberty. Law" the
well Known form was adopted. Mr..
Chase is said to have been criticised
and ridiculed for his action. 1t is very
probable that the minister acted under
the false impression hat Del Gratia
on SO many foreign coins was a rever-
ent religious sentiment instead Of a
deadly political creed.
Change to Saner Sentiments.
When the novelty has worn off and
prejudice has spent it's force we shall
probably regard the new coin very Diff
ferent]y from what we now do. And
with the change to saner sentiments
about it there may come a better atti-
tlile on the whnle subject
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1907-12-20
BY T. L. coMPARETTE.
Curator of Numismatic Collection il
the United States Mint at
PbJEo deIptia

just at the present time. when the
criticism of the new $40 piece designed
by the late Mi. ST. Gaudens shows IL
tendency to become heated, it is not
sufficient to point u the vices of the
old coin, however atrocious that piece
may be. The older coin is not OH trial.
But it is equally true that the old
piece. under 1he certainly erroneous no.
ton that it possesses merit, is the cri-
terion by which the new one is judged.
1t is not easy to conjecture the origin
of that notion.
Coins are supposed to be treated ar
tistically and therefore TO be beautffied,
and the vast majority of the people
take it for granted that the national
government as Il rule achieves it's pur-
pose. But. alas, not always is that the
case. And in nothing that it has ever
undertaken has the government been
more unhappy han in the occasional
efforts to provide h country with a
fairly respectable series of coins. But
the government has not always been to
blame for his distressing state of af-
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1907-12-20
These Theorists.

coke L. Washington, at the Inter-
rational Congress OF Religious Liberty
In Boston, said somewhat impatiently
OF q new theory for the solution OF the
roce question::
But it is work we want. not theo-
ries. There are enough theorists, in all
conscience, but Of workers, on the other
hand there is always a dearth."
The eloquent colorcd man paused
and frowned.
When 1 hear of a. new theory" he
said, II am reminded of the two geol-
ogists.
AT a New Hampshire autumn re-
sort, n brilliant afternoon, the young
CT g~eo!ogist, from his bedroom window.
saw the older man rolling u great rock
the side Of a mountain.
He watched the work for nearly
three hours. The old geologist, thin
and little and white-whiskercd, had a
hard time of it to guide that rock, al
nest as big as himself. u he perse-
vered. He got the rock down where
he wanted it just as the dinner bell
rang.
THE younger mar said to him won
deringly at dinner:
"'What We're you doing with that
rock this afternoon, professorw
why the professor answered.
the fact is. the armed thing was 600
feet too high to suit my theory"
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1907-12-20
Liberality.

One morning last week a missionary
worker was soliciting contributions to-
ward helping the work along. Stopping
at a house in the lower section of the
city she pulled the bell, which was an
swered by a siclly looking woman.
Cant you contribute anything for
the woman whom she had summoned
to the door.
Yes" replied the woman, come
around next Saturday night and get my
husband"