davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-17

So far we've done good business"
Punch.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-09-17
KRONENBERG'S
81 w A SHIN TON ST.
To our Subscribers.

When you wish to change the address
Of your paper be sure and send the
present address as well as the new one.
If this is not done it is impossible to
make the change promptly.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05
CURE YOUR KIDNEYS.
Do Not Endanger Life When
a Cure May Be Had.

Why will people continue to suffer
the agonies of kidney complaint,
backache, urinary disorders, lame
ness, headaches, languor, why allow
themselves to become chronic inval-
ids, when a certain cure is offered
them?
Doan's Kidney Pills is the remedy
TO use, because it gives to the kid
news the help they need to perform
their work.
Ii you have any, even one, of the
symptoms of kidney disease, cure
yourself now, before diabetes, drop
sy or Bright's disease sets in.
Leslie K. Hickman, living on Arch
street, jacksonville, &Ky., says: Il
do not hesitate to recommend Doan's
Kidney Pills. 1 tasted their merits
about three months ago and the re-
suits could not have been more sat
isfactory. had pain through the
small of my back directly over the
kidneys which caused me considera-
bic annoyance sStooping or straight
ening caused sharp twinge5 to catch
me in the! kidneys. | read about
Doan's Kidney Pills and got a box.
noticed a decided improvement
I
from the use of this box, and contin-
ued taking them, using a second box,
which completely cured me. have
every confidence in Doan's Kidney
Pills and cheerfully give them my
recommendation.
For sale by all dealers. Price SOC.
Foster Milburn Co.. Buffalo, N. Y.
sole agents for the United States.
Remember the name-Doan's- TO-
and take no other.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05
A Growing Institution.

Already the largest business
school in the South, the Bowling
Gre n Business University, is still
growing. 1t is now enjoying the
largest September attendance in its
history, 1t has made good all its
promises and pledges. It's gradu-
ates secure positions and hold them
with credit to themselves and sat
isfaction to their employers. 1t ad-
vertises nothing it does not fulfill.
In this way it has justly become the
largest business school in the South.
For information, address Bowl
ing Green Business University Bowl
ng Green, Kentucky.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05
CHOICE BARGAINS
Some Zine Offers In Farm
Lands and Town Lots.

1886 acres u miles south of Hop
kinsville, only three miles from
Howell, well improved; 100 acres
in clover, 26 acres in timothy, IS
acres fine timber-$35, 90 an acre.
SOB acres, near Lafayette, large
house and all other necessary i'm
provemenrs, 90 acres, good red and
post oak timber at the low price of
81, 1900
119 acres, right at Elmo, splendid
improvements and all new, nice
dwelling, one stable, two barns, two
cabins, Doctors office, store building
that rents for 500 a year, buggy
house, corn cribs, etc. A great
bargain.
200 acres, near Pembroke, rich
land and we'll improved. aRuns
right up to within } mile of the
best little town on earth.
1863 acres, right at Garrettsburg,
Ky, 60 acres OF clover, 50 acres OF
good timber. This is very fine land
and we'll located and can be bought
at $26. per acre.
2ll acres, 5 miles South of town,
improvements good, and everything
in good shape. An opportunity you
cannot afford toI miss. -. Price only
$50.
1T acres, 80 miles South of Penn
broke. Nicely improved and bar
gain at S17OO.
4l8 acres near Roarings Springs.
Can be divided into two farms.
Good Improvements, fine land and
will be sold cheap.
A fine location for country doctor.
Beautiful grounds and improvements
and in the most desirable part of
the county.
Also some very desirable houses
and lots in the city for sale.
Call and see us if you are interest
ed in a good home either in city or
country.
If you want to buy anything we
have got it and if you have anything
to sell We can help you.
PLANTERS BANK & TRUST co
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05
CHANGE or HEART.

Sweet Grill hope you will call
again, Mr. Coolhead.
Mr. Coolhead new admirerl--
Thank you, l should be delighted to
call very soon again, if we're sure
of finding you at home.
"Oh, I'm nearly always at home;
bullet me see it won't do for you
to call Tuesday evening for that is the
night Of the home mission meeting;
and Wednesday night the Emperor's
Daughters meet; and Thursday the
Blue Ribbons have a most important
session; and Friday is the monthly
meeting of the Dorcas club; and Sat
urday the Browning club-Really, I
hardly know what day to set; but"
Undo you expect to belong to
those societies always?"
ooh, yes, indeed; I'm life member
of them all"
Ell should like to call again
soon, but this is our busy season, and
shall be confined very closely to the
Office for several months. Good even,
ing. IN. Y. Weekly.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05
An Easy Place to Live.

AS the fashions in women's clothes
in Japan have not changed during g.
500 years there is no reason why the
men OF that country should not have
the most serene countenances known
among civilized people.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05
Confidence.

What the country's finances need
is more confidence" said the patriot.
We'll" answered Farmer Corntos-
sci, thoughtfully, "the only kind of con-
fidence l ever had practical experience
with was a game, an it does seem like
we'd had most too much Of that
Washington Star.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05
Must Have Had a Few.

81 think that young Wadleigh is a
brainless idiot" said the sweet thing
with the dimples.
"But, my dear, you forget" replied
the one with the Marcel wave. HE
actually came near going insane
once. milwaukee, Sentinel.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05
Defending Him.

Your husbands experience with the
races would not indicate that your
husband knows very much about
horses"
Charley knows great deal about
them" answered young Mrs. Torkins,
"Only, like many other men of superb
or knowledge, ne is not very sue
cessful f1nancier. Washington Star.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05

Generally debili'atd for years.
Had sick headaches lacked ambition,
was worn ONT and all run down.
Burdock Blood Bitters made me q
well woman mrs, CHAs FREIToY,
MoOsup, Conn.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05

To Bess I got upon my knees
Twas spring;
My diaphragm in one big sneeze
Took wing
From my sails it seemed to take
The wind,
AS Bess cried: For goodness sakev
And grinned.
Chicago Daily News.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05

Il am going to see your father
about you" said a teacher to a boy
who had exhausted her patience.
IF you do youll never come back. "
why" demanded the teacher.
"Cause pas dead."-Chicago Jour
nal.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05
The Practical View.

why don't l make him keep his
distance| repeated the practical
young woman. IF you knew men bet
ter you wouldn't ask that question.
There isn't one man in a thousand
who will keep his distance without
keeping his money also, What is a
person to do?"
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05
A Sensible Course.

Maiden-What can a woman do
when a man that has won her affec-
ton refuses to marry her?
Lawyers he rich?
mo; hasn't a cent"
"She can appoint a day of general
thanksgiving and invite both families
to participate. IN. Y. Weekly.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05
EvIdence Of n.

Crawford--Did any one ever tell
you that he was henpecked?
e Crabshaw-No, but / noticed por.
traits OF his wifes family hanging all
over the house.-Life.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05
With Anolonles-

Where are you going, my pretty
maid?"
I'm going a-skating, kind SIR she
said
May skate with you, my pretty
maid?"
You're too high roller, kind sir" she
said.
Chicago Tribune.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05
Rather MIxeh-

What verdict did that coroner's
jury bring IMP
Death from wounds inflicted with
suicidal intent by parties unknown
Baltimore American
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05
Discriminating.

She (gushingly)-Dont you love all
the fresh, green young things?
He (judicially)- If they amt
human.-Baltimore American.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05
Request AntIcipated.

once Boy-Your wife is at the tele-
phone.
Employer-Tell her I haven't taken
in a cent to-day.-N. Y. Press.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05

He (just returned from a holiday
in Italy)-So didn't see Naples and
die, after all!
She (absently)-What pity!-The
London.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1907-11-05
Q!
~ -

The Presidential election is ap-
preaching. Times have changed,
That is all. Mr.. Watterson is a
Democrat, and has always been a
Democrat, never a Republican. Es
sential differences out of the way,
Democrats are getting together'''''
The Courier-Journal is going to sup
port the ticket. And there you
have it..
Send your order for this combina-
ton to us-not to the COuricr-Jour.
nal. The regular price Of The
Weekly Courier-Journal alone is 81
a year.
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-05-12
Tho Hoat For the Missouri.

The eccentric and variable Missouri river has "@ personal friend in George Fitch, who declares ill the American Magazine that the stream is navl@abie enough if only the stealnboats Woula conform to it's peculiarities. ''Ihe Mis- sauri river steamboat" says Mi. Fitch ..shoud be shallow. 1.-the, deep chested and exceedingly strong in the stern wheel. It should be hinged in the middle and should be fitted with d suction dredge, so that when it cannot climb over sand bar it can assimilate it. The Missouri river steamboat should be able to make use of q chan nel, but should not have to depend up on it. A steamer that cannot on oc. casion climb a steep clay bank, go across d cornfield and corner d river that is trying to get away has little excuse for trying to navigate the Mis-. souri,"
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-05-12
Street Names h City of Mexico.

The street nomenclature ia the Cit.' ef Mexico is even more puzZling than that in New Orleans. Each block has a different name. Following the same street, you successively go through the streets of St Augustine, of the Angel, of the Holy Ghost, of St. Joseph, etc. From the street of the Rats you pass to the street of the Crosses: from the street of the Gate of Heaven to that of the Love of God. Every shop also has T special name. as was the custom for mprly in Europc. l regret that l did not jOt down many curious ones. | only remember Il ''pulqNe' drirking shop called Los pcrr@S Ghe Dogs). thus plainly telling the frcguentcrS what they are going to. Another pull queria," directly opposite church, calls itself boldly Fl Castillo del Di- ablo dhe Castle of the Deyih. Anoth- pr is San Luncs est. Monday. The Mexican workman always celebrates Monday as a day of rest and dissipa- tion. He will work on sunday, but not on Monday. New Orleans Times Democrat
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-05-12
Knew Denmark. but Not Hamlet.

The Literary Lady-Do you think Hamlet was insane or merely asSuin- ing to be?
 Tue Victim-I beg your pardon. l didn't catch the name.
 The Lady-11amlet.
 The Victim - Oh, yes. Odd name, isn't if? Friend of yours?
 The Lady--I'm talking of Hamlet Prince of Denmark.
 The Nictim-To be sure. Hamlet. Prince of Denmark. I know A lot of those Denmark princes, but l don seem to place Ham, By the way. Den marks getting to be quite town. They tell he they have two regular trains running there now, one of them freight. And l heard just the other day that eastern capital had secured an option on the building lot across the street from the livery stable for q clothcspin factory. Denmark is cer- tainIy looking up.
 The literary lady glares at the vic tim codly and removes herself to an- other part of the room. Whereat the victim smiles.-hansaS City Independent.
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-05-12
The Oldest Book.

The oldest book in the world to which positive date can be assigned is an assortment of proverbs some what after the style of the proverbs collected by Solomon. The work is ae- credited to ptah-hotep, an Egyptian king, and Psychologists assign to it an antiquity of at least 300 B. C. Abra- ham was called to leave his home i'll Ur of the Chaldees 1921 E. C., so that this volume was written HOO years before the beginning of Jewish histo- ry The deluge is placed by most chro- nologists at E. C. 234S, so the book, it it's dating is correct. must have been written before the flood. Methuseiah was born R. C. 3317 so that this papy rus was prepared and these proverbs were collected when the oldest man on record was d lively young fellow Of 900 years
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-05-12
Writing as a Fine Art.

In letter written by the late Lafca- dio Hearn to his friend, the musical critic, II. l.. Krehbiel, the author says: "Let me dwell upon an art principle. Both you and I have a trade-journal- ism. We have also an art-authorship. The same system of labor cannot be applied to the one as to the other with out unfortunate results. Let the trade be performed as mechanically as is consistent with preservation of ones reputation as a good workman. But when it comes to writing a durable thing-a book or brochure-every line ought to be written at least twice, if possible, three times. In the very act of copying new ideas of grace, force and harmony will make themselves manifest. Without this will venture to say, fine literary execution is i'm DOSSible.'
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-05-12
co flippant.

The specialist surgeon. hot with in- dignation. exclaimed. No, I will not take her case, There must be limit to even a Woman's fppancy."
 "Why, Dr. -, what do you neah::' asked the family doctor mildly. "l have always found Mrs. Jones lady In every way"
 .perhaps, answered tie specialist surgeon, more calmly. but with dry severity. 'sShe asked me why q sur geon was like hon.. And when l gave 1t up. what do you think she sail!
 q give it up, too,' said the family doctor
 .Bccause his motto is always Cut cut-cut. ah, cut Wasn't that the limit:'
 And that woman has been under the knife three times,9 reflected the family doctor. 'I'll take her to pr. Smith. lie has d sense of humor.
 And now there is q marked coolness between the specialist surgeon and the family doctor-Brookly Eagle.
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-05-12
A Bit loo Realistic.

Some amateurs in q provincial town gave Il theatrical performance. Just before the curtain went up the star actor took the manager aside and said to him:
 ''Now, look here. I don't propose to drink water instead of wine in the drinking scene in the second act l want genuine wine. The uni ties must be preserved. We want to make this play as realistic as possi- ble'
 ..Oh, you want champagne at 13 shil- lings a bottle. do you?'
 ''Yes, sir. Everything must be re alistic.'
 All right In the second act you shall have real wine. and when you take poison in the last act you shall have some real poison. I'll see that you don't complain of the play not be- ing realistic enough. How does prlls- sic acid strike you?''-I.ondon Tit-Bits
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-05-12
The "Rock of Sports"

The Book of Sports was procla- nation by James l., who in this publi- cation ill l61S signfied to his people the royal pleasure with regard to what sports, games and amusements might De. practiced on Sunday. The king inti mated that mo lawful recreation should be barred on that day to his good peo- ple.; The sports forbidden on Sundays were bear and bull fighting, bowling and interludes. Those who did not at tend church were net allowed to join in the sports. and no one could go out of his parish The amusements allowed were dancing. archery, leaping, vault ing, May games, Whitsun ales and the setting up of May poles.
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-05-12
Strikjno a Fish,

The secret of striking fish, espe- cially trout which bites quickly. whether ill brook. river or lake. is to give a sharp upturn of the wrist. This will move the rod or bait only two or three inches and will not jerk it from the water. If you miss the fish will follow the few inches, not being fright ened. and in the majority of cases will be hooked at once. The quick jerking of the bait from the water almost in yariably sCares q trout-result a dark streak disappearing Gown the stream.
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-05-12
She Got Wise.

X Laramie woman went to the the ater the other night with some friends, but when they were seated she was separated from her friends by man and woman who seemed to pay no at tention to each other The woman figured out that if the two people would sit over seat she could sit with her friends. Bracing up her nerve, she said swcctly to the man. Beg pardon, are you here alone: The man stared at the curtain as if he were drawing a salary for it. "1 beg pardon" the woman said little loud CT. ''are you alone? Get wise," whis- pered the man hoarsely through the extreme corner of his mouth: "thls is my ifc."-I4aramie Boomerang.
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-05-12
South American Oil Birds.

One of the animal curiosities of South America is the "oil bird,' or guacharo. It breeds ill rocky caves OH the main land. and one of it's favorite haunts is the island of Trinidad. It lays its eggs in nest made of mud. and the young birds are predgiously fat. The natives melt the fat down in clay pots and pro duce from it kind of butter. The caves inhabited by the birds are usual ly accessible only from the sea. and the hunting of them is sometimes an exciting sport
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-05-12
Tin Filled Teeth.

i}O you kiioN tilttt t5'tIt l' iiitN with tin:" asked the dentist. tapping one of his patients molars with his little pick.
 "Indced l do. That was filled years ago by a country dentist, and it is the best filling I have ever had put in a t0oth.'
 "Of course it is. It is q pity more people do not know that fact The only trouble is Chat tin is so hard to manipulate it costs moro than gold filling. and people will not pay the price for anything which sounds so cheap as tim i have one customer, though, who is educated. He is q Wall street broker, and he will not let me put any other kind of filling into his teeth except tin. He pays me &2o an hour and lets me take all the time that is necessary. 1t is not so eXpen- size as it seems at first however. for once in q tin filling never has to be renewed, whereas gold often does - New York Press.
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-05-12
ADTSSRgYiHsinsGG, ADTSgHnG

Al store grows ln Importance it's ADVERTISING must GROWS. '"0 o1VhE ITSELF run true because the store MUST KEEP PACE WITH ', nh AD,EhilslNG-or, within hailng distance of it 1t never does quite "catch up, any more ,han no o
 ', M r,; 1he engine And exactly as the engine apu
 u 'fn along so the advertising pulls the store oonr. to nu he comparison: It requires bigger engine .o p.i "irtycar train than does to pu,l ten +
 ana takes more advertising apu h"naraa.e'a. .'' store than it does to pull en.cerl ~ '"oieo'clerh
 the ensne S YT nef make the days that on those days will store ON Tr as, aS goo9 TIE ADVERTISING IS NOT RUSSIyG HE DAis WHEN STRONG TyoTrti r" "" n as "ADEQUATE' when it is IT: ons rhsn "tth t ao PULL THE STORE ALONG AFTER to SEEK BUSINESS and increase trade '"a you desire
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-05-12
if Glaseca Get Stuck.

When tive glasses get stuck, one ln- side the other, an unfailing remedy for separating them is to plunge them up- right into some hGt water for a quarter of a minute or thereahouts. Care must be taken that no H'atA" gets into either glass. The explanation is that the heat expands the outer glass before it has time to penetrate and expand the one inside.
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-05-12
Poor Bird!

The foolish man approached the won ilerful goose that laid the golden eggs.
 "Old bird" eiaculated the foolish man, "I think your time has come. Golden eggs are no longer popular. Why can't you lay gold brckS?"
 "Because. master" replied the goose. 'I don't belong to the bricklayers' un- lon"
 And then tho ax fel-Chicago News.
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-05-12
Dropped.

"Why does Miss Elder always drop her eyes when she meets you?"
 If you will never give it away 1 will tell you. She drops her eyes be cause saw her drop her teeth one day"
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-05-12
When She Listens.

"Poor Henpeck. Every time he starts to say anything his wife stops him.
 -"Not always. He has q habit of talk Ing in his sleep. and when he does that she just listens breathlessly." y."-phila. lelphia Press.
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-05-12

Is an ordeal which all
 women approach with indcscribable fear, for nothing compares with the pain and horror of childbirth. The thought
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1907-05-12

of the suffering and danger for her. robs the Xpet mother of all the her shadow of shaken Thousands of have Friend during pregnancy obs Gonnecnt of all pain and danger and safety 10 fife mother and clld This scientific Gacn god-cnd to M women at the their Not only docs Mothers iriend carry safely through ors clidbh but its
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1907-08-01

w FREE TO OUR FRxENDSi
We want to send to our friends a beautiful
French h-designed GOLD-PLATED BONB0N BOX
hard-enameled In colors- II Is beauty for the
dressing table. Ten cents In stamps Is asked asa
cts with which this dainty trinket Is loaded.
Send to-day. mentioning this paper. Address
Sterling Remedy Company, Chicago or New York
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1907-08-01
A UNIFORM INDIAN RELIGION.
indian to BE Given Instruction thai
VIII Not Befuddle Him.

A form of Christian religion that will
not befuddle the Indian is being arranged
now by experts in the Indian Department
at Washington, and is to be introduced
in the government Indian schools through.
out the United States. The Indian
bureau expects to have the form ready
for introduction by the commencement Of
the autumn terms.
The new policy will bar sectarian in
fuences from Indian schools. At pres
ent ministers of all denominations are
allowed to practice their respective creeds
in the government schools, together with
q particular kind of teaching and prayers
The result is that the Indian pupils be
come confused. They find the Lords
prayer read and printed in different ways
and different constructions placed upon
some passages of the Scripture.
HencefOrward. however, after the uni
form religious code has been introduced,
only non-sectarian exercises will be per
mitted. Each denomination, however
will be allowed to instruct Indians whe
desire to embrace a particular faith, but
there is to be no more competition among
denominations for converts.
All Indian tribes originally had form
of religious worship, which was adhered
to with surprising persistency. The at
tempts to convert the red man, however
have been unceasing since the first dis
coveries of the American continent by
white men. The first white man to live
among the IEdian tribes of this locality
was a Spanish priest, who, with the in
tention of converting the Indians, came
into this country with Coronado during
the seventeenth century and remained
with the Pawnees. Eventually he wal
tortured and murdered by the people
whom he sought to convert.