The Montgomery advertiser., 1907-11-02
DRIFT " OOD
BY PHIL H. AHMsTRoNG.

E. model husband is one who is work tfng-modeL
 What has become of the good old his shoes with a biaclxing brush every Sunday morning? Why do you always receive an un- the day that you are tempted to eat nels1
 Spare the rods and don't spoil the The New York police are warning the people of Marvellous Manhattan Such advice in New York is easily act ed upon.
 It's all right for the dress-maker to have cutting ways.
 .Paderewski has taken to farming on his estate in Poland He'd better be careful that some of his harvesters aon't take his bushy Shead-piece for
 Pelsin, China. is soon to have it's first modern newspaper. It is to be inferred that 1t will have to be yellow in or1er 70 conform to 1t natural environments.
 A verdict of sio.ooo has just been rendered against five college students TOT nazing. This ought to. put a quietus 10 this foolish fad but 1t will
 Did you try to check out more than $25? We didn't.
 Tbree cbears far rr perity!
 MT. Watterson is needlessly alarmed when he says it Is all mistake about We hadn't entertain such A suspicion for moment Marse Henry.
 + <
 The Ute Indians and Theodore Roosc- velt are too strenuous for peace-iov- ing Nation. One or the other will have to step aside for few days We never could watch @ two-ringed circus with any degree of'satisfaction.
 A noted novelist says that girl may be pretty and sensible both at the same time.
 Well if they are just pretty sensible 1t goes long ways.
 We'll, this financial panic will give New York the swelled head worse than ever and a terribly exaggerated es- timation as to the altitude of It's tenn perature. The hand that rocks the cradle (while wifey attends the club seldom has trouble finding the key-hole with a latch-key.
 Poetry is fine for the soul, but pie sets betters on the stomach.
 The financial furry doesn't seem to have worried the newspaper para graphers
 Publications we have not received George Bailey of The Houston Post.
 Robbers in South Alabama have been blowing open "burglar-proof" safes recently appropriating therefrom severay bags of money. The burglar proof of the pudding Is the eating thereof.
 A man in Lawrence County named Bob Montgomery is described as being 80 years old is as sound as gold dol- lar-active as a cat and as lively as Uncle Bob slaps the osler theory square in the face.
 Finally.
 Men may come
 And men may so
 But how women go
 When they get the dough!
 The discovery that prunes cause bald -headedness is not surprising, when you remember that there are no bald headed men in the lunatic asylums: There appears to be a fine bond of between prunes and brains There certainly must be, even. Ella Wheeler Wilcox is said to eat them.
 --k
 "The bonds of matrimony are not always a good investment" advises The Advertiser. Before the trade is closed. however, they general Iy appear to have any get-rich- quick scheme on earth beat to standstill-- Herald.
 George Bailey, the tintinnabulating editor of The Houston Boast, is what might be described as Texas long News.
 Rather a Texas fog-horn.
 PessImIsm. Somebody said that one was going to do something here soon. we dont % pe1 ; %
 Franklin Adams in The New York Mail says that more people step on are in the City of Houston. Are you from Chicago. Frank?-Montgomery Advertiser.
 Why don't you send The Advertiser to our x table?-F P! A When Drift" Armstrong read the reports from Birmingham. he probably lost no time In assembling the Alabama Association of Ragged and Jagged Poets in special session.-Houston Post.
 The Montgomery Advertiser is now discussing "prunes" Is this a dis gutsed reflection on the recent action Ef Birmingham ?--Atianta Constitu- tion.
 To test water, almost fill clean pint bottle with it and add a teaspoonful of sugar (granulated.) Cover tight and keen in a warm place for two days. If at the end of that time it has become cloudy or milky 1t is unfit for domestic use.
 In superficial burns the immediate and direct application of collodian by means of a cameI's-hair brush will relieve the pain and prevent scarring It Is cleanly and practically invisible.
 To broil oysters, lay them in the shell on the fire. with the deep side down: when half cooked turn them. Serve on o hot nfa4a with O little hufter and