The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

MAI IL lluY bC u hC bhoI buio
 W is a time of severe de- pression among those who never felt the cruel pinch of a wintry Wall street before. it may be true that Vested Rights has lost it's vest and is now going around in it's shirt sleeves with tattered pair of Gobelin tapes tries wrapped around it's bent shoul- ders, begging pennies with which to buy a crock of cold poison to send to the White House as Christmas present. Mind you, I'm not saying there things ain't correct. only l take notice that the shop windows don't show any falling off from last year in the number of sets of $40 choo- choo cars and French dolls that could pass for babies if they didn't look so intelligent.
 q guess, after all, it'll be like any other Christmas you can remember Anyway, I know of at least two well known parties that are going right ahead wilt heir preparations for the merriest kind of a Yuletide. You Il recall one of them as soon as l de- scribe him, Larry. He's an elderly person, somewhat gray and wrinkled, and he's slipping around now, doing little here and little thera. taking a pinch out of that ard dip into IS, and rolling up hls mild blue eyes ia quiet enjoyment, the very picture Of satisfaction"
 T know who you mean already, said the House Detective of the Hotel St Reckless.
 ITO be sure you do" said the Ho- tel Clerk. "Everyboey ought to know who l mean half Il second after start in telling about him. He had busy fall. They've kept making de- Hands on hini Jut nobody has caught hlln frettinS or ct np.aining. h eV- cry home. great Jr humble, or once great ant r',w humble as mdny Of them are, they're tee'ing his influence. Itll be may d long day before 1he harassed f1nanciers downtown forget what he's been dong on their ac- counts, and in the tenements Of the poor they'll soon be whispering his name as she evening lamps are lit. But he gives 10 sign- he just keeps on with his work, wearing modest smile on his long, smooth face, ali-
 Long, smooth face9' echo, q the House Detective in astcnshnent. What talk have you Since when did Santy Claus git shave?
 "Who said A anything about Santa Claus?" said0tle i.Gta. s1erk. An what's that obsolete old fossil got to do with the modern celebration of Christmas anyway? He only puts things in a stocking; he never makes toI- n1If Of if
 was speaking of Rockefeller. Who else would be speaking Of!
 'It ought to be a grand Christmas for Rockefeller. Of course, Morgan has something to celebrate but not as much as Rockefeller. When Wall street in it's hour of need was calling for a bale of shingles twas Mor- gan generally came to the relief. But all Morgan got for his trouble was the roof and the top story while Uncle John, who furnished the nails, took the rest of the establishment. Ryan was discovered in the act of trying to get away with the lead pipe of the bathroom fixtures and part of the con- tents of the pantry, but was stopped in time. The former proprietors are now camping out in the hole where the foundations used to be, waiting to be evicted. Yes, I think on the whole it ought to be merry Christmas for John D.-bless his soul-especial- ly as it looks like kerosene ain't going to fall many cents per gallon between now and January l. -
 "Who was the other happy party you mentioned a minute ago?' asked the House Detective.
 His name is Bryan said the Ho- tel Clerk. William Jennings Bryan, known as the Boy Orator of the Platte, before that stream got into the way of occasionally drying up, a habit which units it for association with the gentleman l have named. MT Bryan is a happy and contented farmer now. That is to say, he's still candidate by profession and work ing regularly at the trade. but he does farming as side line. He's quite a success considering that he has to be all the time listening for the Voice of Destiny or the Voice of Tom Tag gart or one of the other Voices that are prominently identified with the party I guess he's probably the only farmer in the world that ploughs while keeping one ear to the ground. He sleeps in the second story of his cosy farm house, but I'm told there's a brass pole running through tbo Aoor tha samp az thev have at an