davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
"What'8 This Hall Habout?"

I hadn't that / felt some creepy hin
side myself. The ceremony come tc a
full stop.
''Hopen the coffing!" borders one OF
the 'eirs.
Il hopened it, and up riz the dead
nan, mad as a 'ornet and hall BLOWN
and snortin'.
Whats this hall habout?' e says,
glarin' haround the room.
"'Beggin' your pardon, sir says I,
steppin' forward, but we was just
hahout to bury you, begin your par
don, sir
Just habout to bury mel he
screams. Get hout OF this house, you
hold vulture!' e says.
And so l gathers up my stuff and
goes, leavin' the 'eirs to pacify i'm.
But arter a few days l sends in my
bill, me 'aving been put to a good deal
Of hexpense, and, SO 'elp me, what do
you s'pose e said? Said e admit hor-
dered no funeral, and, blarst me, e
wouldn't pay for none!
Well, | 'ad to ave my money from
some one, sc l went to the 'eirs, who
was awful sore at being disappointed.
They was pore, they said, and their
huncle was rich. 1t wasn't for them to
pay.
Well, l 'ad to ave my money some
how, and SO l went to law. l sued
the dead man what had come back to
life. And so 'elp me, the judge said it
wasn't is funeral and 'e-hold man
Gormley, that is-didn't ave to pay!
We'll, there it a 1t wasn't no
use suing the 'eirs, bein' as they 'ad
nothin' to pay with. l thought of suing
the doctor, but him and me 'ad been
in the 'abit of THROWN a good deal in
one hanother's way, professionally,
you know, and l couldn't afford to lose
is trade. And so it was. l 'ad rem
dered services, but who was l to
charge them to? That was enough for
me. | quit the undertaking business
soon after.'-New York Press.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
ALL A DEAD LOSS
UNDERTAKEN NEVER DID COL
LEcT HIS BILL.
Incident That Drove Old Man Webb
Out Of the Business-Provided
Funeral for Man Very
Much Alive.

Eyes, sirs. gents, I ave been In a
good many businesses in my lifetime,
/ ave-" said Webb, the rubber in the
Turkish bathhouse, as he sighed, rem
%iniscently. Il was born in hold
Hengland, many's the year ago, n
since that day l ave been a good
many things in my lifetime, | ave. l
ave been a clerk in a gents furnish
ing store, l ave been a bartender, l
ave been a waiter in a cheap-John
restaurant, and once | was a n q
taker.
Eyes, gents" said Webb, as he
sighed again, Il ave been a hunder-
taker. And whilst | was ~hengaged in
that business l 'ad han heXperience
that | 'opes as won't 'appen to none
of you; for, gents, it cost me dear.
1T was on an hoccasion we'en | was
'ired to bury a h%epilectic of Sc years.
Hold man Gormley e was; a rich hold
codger, and mean and stingy as heyer
lived, and | ave seen many a mean
and stingy man in my time. Tnere
was once a man as give me a fiVe-cent
tip for serving i'm an h~eighty-five cent
dinner, and, blarst me, the nickel 'ad
a ole in it. But hold nan Gormley
died at last, and is 'eirs 'ad Ugh 'opes.
But they give i'm a decent funeral, |
will say that for 'em, and the money
as was spent for givin' i'm a good
send-off run well hup into the 'undreds.
They 'hordered the best 'ad in the
shop, and l was %hexpecting a right de-
cen profit on the ole.
well, gents, right in the middle Of
the ceremony, whilst the preacher was
reading solemn words from the Good
Book and whilst the 'eirs "a all set
tin round tryin' to look has sad has
they could hunder the circumstances,
we card hinside the cofing a rippin',
snortin' sound. One of the young lady
'eirs gives a scream, and the rest OF
EN- had plugged out at the heyes, and
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
Wild Ostriches Grow Tame.

A group of six wild ostriches were
seer on the commonage on Saturday
afternoon. The huge birds were dis
porting themselves OF an ant heap
only a few yards from the road. The
little group seems to have made the
east end of the commonage and the
government reserve their home, and
are often to be met with.
So tame are they that on a person
approaching they simply get up from
the road, where they are often lying,
and walk a few yards on to the veldt
and gaze composedly at the passer by.
-Rhodesia Herald.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
BABY IN TERRIBLE STATE.
Awful Humor Eating Away Face
Body a Mass of Sores-Cuticura
Cures in Two Weeks.

my little daughter broke out all
over her body with a humor, and we
used everything recommended, but
without results. / called in three doc
tors, but she continued to grow worse.
Her body was a mass of sores, and her
little face was being eaten away. Her
ears looked as if they would drop off.
Neighbors advised me to get Cuticura
Soap and Ointment, and before l had
used half of the cake of Soap and box
of Ointment the sores had all healed,
and my little ones face and body were
as clear as a newborn babes. l would
not be without it again if it cost five
dollars, instead of se~venty-ive cents.
Mrs. George ]. Steese, 701 Coburn ST,
Akron, o., Aug. 80, 1905"
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
Fiqhtinu with Ants.

The Indians of the Mauritius dis
pose of termites, or white ants, in this
manner: When they see their covered
way approaching a building, they drop
a train of syrup from this way to the
nearest nest of black ants. The first
ones that see the syrup follow it up
I'LL they reach the termite passage.
They return to their nest, and in a
few hours a black army starts out for
fury they rush into the galleries, and
in a short time entirely destroy the
enemy, and each one, on its way
home, carries a dead termite. proba.
bly, to eat.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
Probably He Is Not.

w. Bourke Cochran at a ST. Pat
rick's day dinner told a story of an
Irishman who was taking about the
case of Barring Gould, whose obituary
was recently printed by mistake, Mr..
Gould still being happily in circula-
ton: so" said the Irishman, they've
printed the funeral notice av a man
that amt dead yet, how they? Faith,
an it's a nice fix he'd be in now if he
was wan O. thin people that behaves
Everything they see in the papers"
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
Swell, Club Of London Walters.

The waiter who respectfully attends
you at the Carlton, the Ritz, the Sa-
voy or the Cecil is quite a different in
dividual when he enters the palatial
premises in Noel street, Soho, which
were opened last night as a walters
club. The building has cost G15,000.
The opening of the club was made the
occasion for a grand banquet, which
was a combination of the best that
can be found in the best West End
restaurants.-London Daily Mirror.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
Careless French Surgeons.

A narrow escape from a shocking
tragedy has aroused the charities COM
missioner of Paris, to admonish hos
pital surgeons sharply as to their
duties and responsibilities. A woman
recently died" in a hospital under
circumstances that inspired suspicion
as to the cause of death and an autop-
sy was ordered. When the doctors
were ready to begin, the woman, to
their CONSERVATION. regained her
senses.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

There is more Catsrrh in this section of the country
than ali other diseases put together, and until the last
few years was supposed to be incurabie. For a great
many years doctors pronounced 1t a local disease and
prescribed local remedies, and by constantly falling
to cure with local treatment, pronounced II incurable.
Science has proven Catarrh to be a constitutional dis
ease, and therefore requires constitutional treatment.
Halls Catarrh Cure, manufactured by I'D. Cheney
& Co., Toledo, Ohio, is the only Constitutional cure on
the market. 1t is taken internally in doses FROM 10
drops to q teaspoonful. 1t acts directly on the blood
and mucous surfaces of the system. They offer one
hundred dollars for any case II falls to cure. SEND
for circulars and testimonials.
Address: FL. CHENEY & CO., Toledo, Ohio.
Sold by Druggists, 75c.
Take Halls Family Pills for constipation.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
Kite Control.

Kite control within certain pre-
scribed limits has been accomplished
in France by means of a "deviator,"
and this makes the kite available for
life saving purposes. A severe test
was given to the device some time ago
at Royan, on the east coast of France,
and wonderful things were accom-
pIished.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
How a Fox Escaped.

In the West Somerset England
country recently a fox was hunted
light down to the seashore, and to the
surprise of every n he swan boldly
put to sea.
The hounds we're taken away, and
after some minutes the fox swan
back. landed, shook himself and trotted
quietly away. The master decided
hat his life was to be spared and
le was hunted no more that day.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
OF THE FIFTEENTH CENTURY.
Celebrated Statue Of the Divine In,
FAINT in Italy.

The celebrated statue Of the d.
vine Infant was carved In Jerusalem
from the wood Of the olive trees OF
Gethsemane in the Fifteenth century
by a member of the Franciscan order,
who bought it to the Capitoline hill.
Rome, and placed it for generation
in the church Of the Friars Minor in
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

Ara Coeli, where it is now known,
visited and honored by the whole
Catholic world, owing to the innumer-
able favors the Infant is said to be-
stow upon those who venerate it. 1t
was solemnly crowned by the vatican
chapter on the I'd of May, 1897. 1t is
adorned with 81, 900. 900 worth of jew
els given as votive offerings.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
A Case of Spring Catarrt1.

Mrs. N. ?. Lawler, 1881 N. broadway,
Pittsburg, Kas., writes: Last spring |
caught a severe cold, which developed
into a serious case of catarrh. L felt
weak and sick, and could neither eat
nor sleep well.
"a member of our club who had been
cured of catarrh through the use of Pc
runa advised me to try it, and l did sc
at once. l expected help, but nothing
like the wonderful change for the better
l observed almost as soon as l started
taking it. In three days l felt much
better, and within two weeks l was in
fine health. Peruna is a wonderful
medicine
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
Third Set OF Teeth,

J.. r. Truett, an operator Of the
Western Maryland railroad at Bran
don, zeal Chambersburg, Pa, is elated
over the fact that a third set of teeth
is growing in his mouth.
Some of the new teeth have partial
ly developed and the fortunate man
has discarded his false ones.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
Would Grow Tobacco In Ireland.

An effort is being babe under direc.
ton of William Redmond to repeal
the law which prohibits the growing
of tobacco IN ireland. 1t is held that
soil and climatic conditions in Ireland
are favorable to the production of y
good quality of tobacco, and that its
cultivation can be made profitable.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

He who is always hearing and an
swering the call of life to be thought
full, and brave and self-sacriicing-he
alone can safely hear the other cry Of
life, tempting him to be happy and
enjoy.-Phillips Brooks.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

Good words do more than hard
speeches; as the sunbeam without any
noise will make the traveller cast off
his cloak, which all the clustering
wind could not do, but only make him
bind it closer to him.-Leighton.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

Life, misfortune, abandonment, pow
erty are the fields OF battle which
have their heroes-obscure heroes,
who are sometimes grander than
those who win renown.-Victor Hugo.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

"EVithout hesitation I aVrte TO thank
yon for the great reAcfI haze Jonnd N
your valuabAe medicine, Pe,-Rna, and
anil cal the attention Of all my friends
Smferlng zc4th cGta1rh to khatJae Be
sides / chee31uNy recommend ii 10 all SM1-
fcr1ne 7Vfth catayyh in any formz."-
Mss Dora Hayden, 8l9 9TH ST., S. w.,
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
Shake Into Your Shoes

Aliens Foot-Ease. 1t cures painful, swollen,
smarting, sweating feet. Makes new shoes
easy. Sold by all Druggists and Shoe Stores.
Don't accept any substitute. SampleFREE.
Address A. S. Olmsted, LIE Roy, N. Y.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
That Bald Spot

does show when YOU hair is dressed,
but it worries you just the same. bar.
RVS Tricopherous grows hair on bald
spots. so cents per bottle at your
druggists or by mail postpaid. Bar
clay G. Co., As Stone Street, N. Z.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

Queen Alexandra, after a residence
Of As years in England, has visited the
tower OF London. She is said to have
been much interested In what she
saw"
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
Johnny's AiImcnt,

"Yes," said Mrs. Lapsling, "Johnny
is ailing, but I'm not going to give
him any drugs. / believe the trouble
is in his bones, and l am going to
take him to a costlyopothist."
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
RiNI TRAY.

Bini women carry their trays 20
market on their heads. The body OF
the tray is made of pieces Of the mid.
rib of the raphia palm and the sides
composed Of stout pieces of calamus.
The sides are movable and can be
turned down fiat on top.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

The archdiocese OF Cologne, Ger.
many, is the largest in the world,
with a Catholic population OF more
than 2,O0O,0 900.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

For more reasons thar one, Garfield Tea
is the best choice when a laxative is
needed: it is Pure, Pleasant to take, Mild
and Potent. Guaranteed under the Food
and Drugs Law.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

.:ost Difficult Of Artists Studies.
B. w. Leader, r. A., considers that
to an artist clouds are the most din.
cult of all studies.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

FITS, st. Vitus Dance and all Nervous
Diseases permanently cured by DR.. Kline's
Great Nerve Restorer. Send for Free 500
trial bottle and treatise. DR.. r. h. Kline,
Id, 93l Arch St.. Philadelphia. Pa.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

The deepest sympathy man can
show to man is to help him do his
iuty.-Mulock.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

A pretty girl is as fond of drawing
attention as a political oficeholder is
Of drawing a salary.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

Mrs. Winslow's Soothing Syrup.
For children teething, softens the gums, reduces In
nammation, ailays pain, cures wind collie. Csc q bottle
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

Itch cured in 80 minutes by Woolford's
Sanitary Lotion. Never fails. At druggists.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

Prince Fond Of Boxing.
Prince Waldemar Of Denmark Is q
capital boxer and is ever ready to put
on the gloves.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

wANTED-For q. S. Army, able
bodied, unmarried men, between ages
of Fl and So; citizens of United States,
Of good character and temperate hab-
its, who can speak, read and write
English; for information apply to re-
cruiting officer, 126 N. Court, Mem
phis, Tenn; 236 Main, Jonesboro,
Ark; Union City, Tenn; Caruthers-
vile, Mo-; Corinth, Miss; Dyersburg,
Tenn, or Humboldt. Tenn.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
Wine Of Cardui o.

The reward for a good deed done is
in having done it.-Emerson.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
Worth More Money.

DO you consider a chauffeur worth
5000 a month";"
"Well the last one / had ran away
with my wife, and you knew my wife,
old man."-Life.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

It is a pity to be ill! Take Garfield Tea,
the laxative exactly suited to the needs of
men, women and children; it is made
wholly of herbs; it purifes the blood,
eradicates disease, overcomes constipation,
brings Good Health.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

Cereal Crop Worth $2,ooo,o oo, 900.
The United States cereal crop of
1906 aggregated 5000. 000, 900 bushels,
valued at 81, 100000
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

A bad imitation is often better than
the real thing.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

Usually a woman Of uncertain age
cmains at . certain age for . long
sme.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03
PUTNAM FADELESS DYES color
more goods, per package, than others, and
the colors are brighter and faster.

Ape no greatness. Be wilbrg to pass
for what you are. A good farthing is
better than q bad sovereign .-Sterne.
The Tupelo journal., 1907-05-03

Write TODAY for a free copy of valuable 6tpage ILLUSTRATED
Book for Women. If you need Medical al, Advice, ;des serb
your symptoms, stating age, and reply VII! be sent IN plsiI
sealed envelope. Address: Ladies' Advisory Dept. Int
ChattanOOga Medicine Co.. CHATTANOOGA Tenn.
The Sisseton weekly standard. (Sisseton, Roberts County, S.D.) 1892-1929, 1907-08-23
Fewer Mills Operate.

The South Dakota and Southern
Minnesota Millers' club held a confer
ence at Huron. President George
Sexauer of Bookings, and Secretary
Henry Neil of Madison were present,
as were also members from twenty-five
or more places in South Dakota and
Minnesota. Reports as to crop condi-
lions were comprehensive and dis
cussed the fact that the estimated
yield would be about 25, ZOO, 900 bush
els with 1000, 900 of macaroni or dur
UNI wheat. This estimate is about 20
per cent less than a year ago. In the
territory covered by this organization
reports indicated that at least eighteen
fewer mills will be in operation this
fall than a year ago. which fact is ac-
counted for by the claim that the
smaller mills being unable to stand
the discrimination which has been
forced Upon them. The next meeting
will be held at Sioux Falls.
The Sisseton weekly standard. (Sisseton, Roberts County, S.D.) 1892-1929, 1907-08-23
MAY BUY
Hill City Action in Telephone Trouble
May Be General.

Pending the final reply Of the Ne
braska Telephone company to It's sub
scribers in the various small towns
around the Hills, the boycott that 4he
latter have instituted against the COM
pany on account of its recent estab-
lishment of toll rates for all %long-dis-
lance talks, the fight is now in statue
quo. General Superintendent Belt and
General Manager H. Vance Lane, both
of Omaha, are in the Hills at present
endeavoring to adjust the difficulty.
At Hill City the Nebraska company
sold its exchange and fifteen tele-
phones to John Mates. a lumber deal.
er Of that place. The basis of the set.
Element was the operation Of the ex-
change by Mates IN a royalty Of Is
per cent on all outside business done
by that exchange over the rest of the
Nebraska company's lines in the Hills
1t is probable that other towns in the
Hills will adopt similar propositions,
leaving Deadwood and Lead the princi.
pal exchanges owned by the Nebraska
company.
The Sisseton weekly standard. (Sisseton, Roberts County, S.D.) 1892-1929, 1907-08-23
PickETT's OLD FRIEND.
A Story Told of Abraham Lincoln's
Visit to Richmond,

~ SASs tOio VI NOI oIldNu GNNtSVttl .
Visit to Richmond.
The day after the great fire follow
ing the fall Of Richmond, Lincoln,
with a small bodyguard, walked
through the streets of the charred city.
AS he approached the corner occupied
by Gen. Pickett's residence he direct
ed the guard to wait, and to their as
constituent ran two steps at a time
up to the door and raped. The serv-
ants had fled. The baby bride" had
never zen President Lincoln, but she
had read his letter to her husband and
from it had learned to hold in the
highest esteem the great Northern
President. With her baby in her arms
she opened the door, says The World
To-Day, and looked up at the tall,
gaunt man with the sad face and un-
couth ways.
Without a word of explanation he
asked:
as George Pickett about?"
To hear the husbands name bereft
of it's title by a Yankee at that mo-
ment vas almost the limit, especially
as a umo had foated about Rich
mond concerning the fate which await
ed the leaders of the c~onfederacy.
With all the proud dignity she
could command the baby bride re.
Piled:
Gen. Pickett is not at home"
The stranger seemed disappointed
and as he turned to go remarked:
II am Abraham Lincoln, an old
friend Of Georges"
mot President Lincon!" Mrs. Pick
EFT exclaimed. The tall man shook his
head, repeating:
mo. Just Abraham Lincoln, George
Pickett's old friend"
Following the instinct promptings
Of the heart which still governs her,
the baby bride thrust her baby boy
into the arms Of the gaunt Yankee, as
her best effort to express he. venera-
ton and confidence. saying:
II am George Pickett's wife and this
is George Pickett's baby"
The Sisseton weekly standard. (Sisseton, Roberts County, S.D.) 1892-1929, 1907-08-23
FEEL R A TO SHEEP.
Farmers Buy FIeeks to Turn Upon
Hai!-Swept Fields.

6uy Flock 70 Turn upon
HaI!-Swept Fields.
Many Of the farmers of southern
Brown and northern Sphinx counties,
through which a disastrous hail storm
recently swept, utterly destroying the
crops on several hundred farms, IN or
der to save something out of the wreck
Of their grain fields, are purchasing
sheep in the Far West and will ship
them to the hail-swept fields so the
animals can fatten upon the many
thousands Of bushels of grain which
is scattered over the ground. This
feed will place the sheep in first-class
marketable condition, and they should
command high prices on the market.
The farmers, who have decided to pur-
chase the sheep in large numbers, be-
lieve that in this way they can save
and derive a revenue from at least a
small portion of the crops which ere
destroyed.
The Sisseton weekly standard. (Sisseton, Roberts County, S.D.) 1892-1929, 1907-08-23
LEVY TO be
Irvine Plant Is the Cause Of Increased
Tax Lew.

Irvine Plant Is the Cause Of Increased
Tax Levy.
The levy for state taxes this year ID
Ia of a mill greater than any other
levy made in any n year since state.
hood. This is on account of the 1 IA
mills for an operating fund for a state
binding Irvine plant at the penitentiary.
which was voted as a separate consti.
tutional amendment by the people OF
the state at the last general election.
The legislature authorized a 2-mill
emergency levy for this and next year
but on account of the Irvine levy, only
1 mill of the emergency levy was an.
piled, and this with the 2 mills sener.
al levy, makes the total.
The Irvine plant levy will bring a
revenue of about 100000 after count.
Ing out the taxes which will not be
paid, and will be a sufficient fund to
put into operation the Irvine plant
which has been erected on the peni.
Tertiary grounds from an a%ppropria.
ton which was made by the lekisla.
ture of 1905 for that purpose. The
mills general, and the l mill deficiency
will not meet the estimated expenses
of the state and take up the outstand-
ing revenue warrants, and will re-
quire a renewal of that indebtedness
at the beginning Of a new year, but
the full two mills emergency levy was
not thought advisable with the added
Irvine plant levy.
The 2 mills emergency has been au.
thorized for next year, and then no
doubt will be placed on.