davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1907-07-18

Gass. squeezed some water from a
sponge on your bead 10 cool you of
and you threw q glass at him and
missed him, and then he threw glass
OF water in your face and you fell over
a chair trying 20 get out Of the way7''
NO" Yeamann protested. Il did
nothing"
Adolph Gass. the defendant, being IN
certain OF his English. Miss Kunsteer.
by consent OF counsel. translated from
the original Yiddish. while watchful-
cared Bebe Kopelmanp. for the PLAINTIFF.
ungallantly saw that the word was not
tempered with.
From this version OF the affair It
transpired that the two meQ were en-
ployed IN the same shirt factory at 7
East Seventeenth street, and that the
pouring of the water had been preceded
by a heated discussion on economic
topics. The necessity for the physi-
clans certificate, Gass was sure, was
due wholly TO Yeamann's fall.
There had been an Argument Miss
Kunsteer summed up for her client.
smiling still. and he fell over a chair,
lodging the water. That's all there IS
to II. isn't it?''
Gass nodded.
Well Magistrate Moss concluded
judlcially. seeing that you. YeaRlann.
have been at the expense of a lawyer and
a doctors certificate and that you. Gass.
are also represented by learned counsel,
guess you've both been punished
enough"
Miss Kunsteer. sim smiling. turned
away. cOloring slightly. Bebe Kopel-
mann caught UP with her. and their re-
spective clients trailed. more or less be-
wildered. behind the pair.
The Washington times., 1907-07-18
STAY OF ITHACA BAND
LIMITED TO THEE DAYS

But three more days remain for tho
ithaca Band TO please the patrons OF
Luna Park The band has attracted
more than usual attention the past week
For the remainder OF Conway-s sea-
son, selected programs nave been ar
ranged embracing all the best compos-
erS and their foremost compositions.
Heroerts Grenadier Guard Band IS
scheduled 20 succeed the Ithaca organ
ration. beginning its season July o.
Inc band comes from Philadelphia at
tractive Woodside Park. where Il has
mede a favorable impression, according
70 the laudation bestowed upon II by
the Philadelphia press.
Alfreno.' the high wire artist. is CIV
ing satisfaction with his daring high
wire act At 4 height OF fifty feet no
wire walking
Mile. Loubet's loop-the-l00p Is an
nounced for the week OF July D
The park has in contemplation a novel
guessing contest. details OF which will
be announced IN Sundays paper.
The Washington times., 1907-07-18
Fair Modern POrtia
Smiles Away Charge
Against Her Client
of Counsel Punishment Enough, Learn
ed Court Decides, and Woman Lawyer Has
Victory Turn Bitter to Her Taste.

NEW YORK. July ls.-Miss Esther
Kunsteer. counselor at law. leaned nom
chalantly on the bar at Jefferson Mar
ket court and remarked. smilingly:
II don't think the complainant will
show up. your honor"
But that was where Miss Kunsteer
failed TO realize the intensityNof purpose
that moved Levi Yeamann. She also
overlooked the point, apparently, that
Bebe Kopelmann was looking after the
legal interests OF the complainant. for
the two rushed excitedly 70 the front
when Yeamann's name was called and
The Washington times., 1907-07-18
COLONEL JOYCE DEsPoNDENr.

Graft in the kitchen. graft in the hall.
Graft IN the grocery and graft at the
ball:
Graft in the office and graft in the
mill.
Graft in the valley and graft on the
hill:
Graft with the doctor and graft with
the drug,
Graft in the barroom and bright parlor
rug:
Graft with the lawyer and graft with
the clerk,
Graft with the ianitor. man of all work:
Graft for the preacher and graft for
the Pope.
Graft for the takers Of Doodle and
hope:
Graft. for the wise and graft for the
daft.
For there's nothing on earth but graft,
graft. graft
JOHN A JOYCE.
Washington, D. c.
The Washington times., 1907-07-18

the latter pushed a crumpled piece OF
paper across TO the magistrate
The latter glanced at the document
and then read:
Several Commissions OF the scs.. and
left hand, together with acute abdom-
inal pains"
The magistrate glanced over his
glasses at the unruffled front OF Yea
mann. ignoring the hand the latter
pushed back the cuff from 70 show a
pinlike scratch. and asked:
How much did you give for thatT'
Nothing" Yeamann answered, wide
The Washington times., 1907-07-18
BOLT KILLS WOMAN
STANDING IN CHURCH

BUCYRUS. Ohio. July 1s.-while
standing an church last evening. talking
with the minister and her husband. Mrs
Harry Miller, aged forty years, was
struck dead by lightning. The bolt hit
the steeple on the church and ran down
TO the central chandelier. Mrs Miller,
surrounded by many of the congrega-
ton. stood under the chandelier. and the
bolt attracted by her metal-rimred
glasses. descended upon her.
The Washington times., 1907-07-18
- stands hehInd &c with a

explained. ''He stands behind me with a
sponge and pours water on my head"
Maybe he thought you needed cooling
of this hot weather" the magistrate
suggested. pacifcaIly.
NO" Yeamann protested vigorously.
Then he poured 1t from a glass in my
face. and I am blinded ana hurt my
hand and head
Want to cross-examine?" the magis-
trate asked, turning TO Miss Kunsteer.
who had kept her superior smile through
all the foregoing.
She tossed her head "Oh, hardly
think IL necessary"
But. being pressed by his honor, she
turned her smile on YeamRnn.
Now. isn't IT a fact that all this was
IN fun7" she asked in her blandest you
get-the-frst-dauce manner.
In fun-when get bruises like that7
No"
And you didn't do anything, OF
course?" she caJoled.
mo. not me-.
Variation of Smile.
Now. isn't it a fact" she began with
another variation OF the smile. looking
straight into Yeamann's gold-framed
glasses. that all this started In an
argument. and that my client here. Mr.
The Washington times., 1907-07-18
LOVE NOTES EATEN
BY ROMANTIC HORSE

STAMFORD. July ia certain STAN
ford morse, that was never suspected Of
being anything but a staid, sober old
steady-goer, has worried the Stamford
girls by breaking open a letter-box and
feeding on the love letters contained
therein. BUSINESS letters were not mo-
Tested. The owner is keeping a close
watch on the animal to see what effect
the love letters may have on his system.
The postoffice people are pointing to
the case as an example OF w'nat is likely
to happen If people continue hitchinE
their horses 10 letter boxes The horse
is suffering nothing more serious than
sizes"
The Washington times., 1907-07-18
Dr.. WileU Will Be Known
AS Pure Food Law Father,
Declares II. B. Needhdm
interesting Review Given at jamestown by Washing
tonian on Hard Fight Made By Government
For High Standard

JAMESTOWN EXPOSITION. July IL.
The Peoples Lobby and It's Pure
Food Work was The subject Of an ad-
dress delivered here this afternoon by
Henry Beach NeedhRm. Of Washing ton
secretary OF the Peopls's Lobby, at the
eleventh annual convention OF the As
societiOn o. State and National Food
and Dairy Products. After reviewing
the fight carried on for many years in
ar endeavor 70 get the pure food bill
through the upper house, Mr.. Needham
said IN part:
Dr. Harvey W. Wiley, chief Of the
Bureau OF Chemistry. Department Of
Agriculture, will be known as the father
Of the food and drugs act II is an
honor which this rare public servant
Justly deserves. But without detractins
In any way from the value of his ser
vices, II is only fair TO say that TO the
food and dairy commissioners compris-
Ing this association is due a large meas
cre of credit for the placing Of the pure
food law on the statute books. This
Is no idle hattery. In their several
States these commissioners began work
OF reform. They educated sentiment;
they aroused their people. first. to de-
mand OF the State legislatures food and
dairy laws. aud then, 10 insist that such
statutes be enforced without fear or
favor. II was these commissioners who.
convinced that the cooperation Of the
Federal Government was essential 10
bring about efficient food control. urged
their constituencies to demand legisIa-
ton of Congress.
Beginning Of Movement.
1T was the State food and dairy COM
missioners who, more than any other
body Of public spirited men. aroused the
country 70 demand action It was PresI-
dent Roosevelt. the leader OF that
arouOed public sentiment. who brought
about pure food legislation by gzlvaniz-
Ing Congress into action.
Consider IL well. for Il is truly a re-
markable happening IN the light Of the
economic reform which WIS sweeping
the country. After seventeen years the
Senate. driven 10 action by 1 popular
sentiment as strong in the South in
the North. as vigorous n the East as
IN the West, passed a bill for prevent
Ing the manufacture. sale, or transpor-
talon Of adultered or misbranfed foods.
drugs, medicines. and liquors
Then, under the benign influence OF
manufacturers whose business was 20
be affected nv such law. and IN obedi-
encc 20 the demands OF their paid lob
byiets, the leaders OF the House. which
calls itself the popular branch OF the
National Legislature, determined that
the viii OF the people should be frus-
trated"
PerniciouS Lobby Influence.
Mr.. Needham referred in scathinS
terms 10 the '-pernicious influence OF the
lobbyist upon legislation" He referred
The Washington times., 1907-07-18
DAIRY ASSOCIATION SPLITS
OVER STATE INSPECTION

NORFOLK. Va. July 1S.-A vigorous
fight is on in the Association Of State
and National Food and Dairy Depart
ments, now in convention at thu James
town Exposition. over the question OF
State or Federal control Of the food in
spection and regulation. The State Of
ficers, almost 20 a man, are standing to-
gether for individual State regulation,
while the national officers advocate uni
form Federal control.
The Washington times., 1907-07-18
Behind Him with Sponge.
AUTO HITS EGG WAGON,
IT RAINS OMELETTES

NEW YORK, July 1s-An auto con-
tanning Andrew D. Maloy. OF % Broad
street. Manhattan, and several friends,
whirled three blocks down the hill
which leads from the Long Island rail-
road tracks to Jamaica avenue, East
New York. and crashed into two wag-
ons laden with eggs.
The result might be described as an
omlette du forcs. Broken eggs spat-
tered about as IL the sky were shower
ing the barnyard product. One man
was slightly bruised when the auto hit
the wagon he was driving. Mr.. Maloy
and his friends were uninjured, but
not so their clothing.
The Washington times., 1907-07-18
Two Wharf Lessons.

W. I" hAAA L~OOOAkOs
a pretty bad bargain was struck
by the District several years ago in
renting the wharf privileges at the
foot of Seventh street.
All river frontage along the Po-
tomac river and Anacostia river
channels in the District of Columbia
is advancing rapidly in commercial
value.
These are the two lessons of the
inquiry which the present District
Wharf Commission has just con-
cluded without any fuss and feath-
ers. They are worth more than
passing notice.
When the Government took DOS
session of its own land from the
oyster wharves to the Arsenal sew
eral years ago, it paid the steam
boat, ice, and lumber companies
which had built docks there a char
aGteristic price for the improve
ments they had constructed. Then
astute representatives of the people
set about to estimate the rental
those same companies should pay
for the further uee Of District prop
erty.
No attempt was made, apparently,
to fix on the full value of the priv
ilege and charge accordingly. There
does not seem to have been any
effort to gauge the value of the
ground and add it to the improve
ments the District had just pur-
chased. Instead, a rate of about S
per cent of the value of the wharves
and piers alone was agreed upon.
Then the District was bound by
its representatives to accept that
rental for five years certainly and
for five years longer if the lessee
should so desire. The effect is that
the transportation companies Will
continue to enjoy a rate extremely
advanta Eeous to them-and any
thing but profitable to the tax
payer-until 1911 or 1912. The only
way the District can get any better
price is through legislative enact
ment by Congress.
Yet the showing of rentals for
less desirable property is that river
front values have advanced rapidly.
Along the James Creek Canal-that
delicately-scented and verdure-cov-
cred monument TO the occasional
lack of enterprise on the part of
Congress for the District of Column
bia-the discovery is bhthely made
that tenants of the District have
been subleasing their wharf priv
ileges and making fine profits out of
the operation. Persons holding at
so cents a foot were making % cents
a foot on their privileges, and those
who paid IS cents were finding ready
sales at SIPS. Hereafter the orig
inal lessee will pay SIPS, and should
that charge prove still to be Hess
than the market value Of the wharf,
it viii go on up. The District is for
tunately not bound here by any ten
year agreements.
Interesting as all this is, we of the
District must yet not forget that 1t
represents only half a use of one of
our most valuable municipal assets.
The river front ought to be built up
with fine, concrete wharves, hand
some and permanent docks, and
made 70 yield at least three-fourths
of the revenue a non-governmenta
owner would obtain from such a
property, as well as to foster the
development Of our river trade. But
while we wait for Congress to make
such a situation possible, it is well
TO do with the river front what we
can as well as we can.
The Washington times., 1907-07-18

eyed at such a query: land here is the
heda.'' he added. pointing TO the back OF
his skull. where the slicked-down light
colored hair posed peacefully. The alb
dominal pains were not put IN evidence.
But where did you get that doctor
certificate-at a hospital?'
mo; from my own doctor. Where else
should 1 go?"
Behind Him With Sponge.
Well. never mind What was II all
about?' the magistrate went on
1T was a pouring Of water" Yeamann
The Washington times., 1907-07-18
ATTRACTS THIRSTY ONES
TO CHURCH WITH SODA

SYRACUSE. July 1s.-Rev. Joseph A.
Serena, pastor Of the Central Church of
Christ Disciples will install a soda wa
ter fountain in the vestibule Of his
church, to attract people during the
hot weather. Beginning next Sunday,
he will serve lemonade and Az to all
who come Mr.. Serena Is of the opin-
ion that most of the people who stay at
home during the summer would attend
church If they had the proper induce
nents
The Washington times., 1907-07-18
cRAZED BY IR0QU0IS FIRE,
LOST WIFE AND CHILDREN

MARSHALL. Mich. July 1s.-Thc loss
Of his wife and five children in the
Iroquois Theater fire in Chicago in
1903 has so preyed on the mind OF James
Herring. who formerly lived IN Chicago,
that yesterday his brother. Edward. pc
titioned the probate court to have a
guardian appointed for him.
The Washington times., 1907-07-18

The Colorado delegation Of Elks at the
Philadelphia convention came with ar
tillery and ammunition. prepared to
shoot up the town in approved Western
style, only using blank cartridges. Now
the authorities have declined 20 allow
the stunt TO be pulled Of The Brotherly
Love authorities felt that a too sudden
awakening might be severe on the
nervous organization of the old town.
The Washington times., 1907-07-18
At Smithsonian Grounds
7.3o p. M.
U.S.. Cabalry Band
F. AnSelsberg, Bandmaster

March, Poor John .Pether and SCOTT
Overture. Morning, Noon and
Night in Vienna" .Suppe
Wal-z. Moonlight on the Hudson
Herman
Selection. robin Hood ..DeKoven
Patrol. The Blue and the Gray
Dalbey
Melodies from The Bohemian Girl
Bale
Medley, Strains from stern's NO. 1.
Arranged by Halle
March. IF tire Man IN the Moon
Were a Coon. Fisher
The star-Spangied Banner"
The Washington times., 1907-07-18
Roosevelt in Nine Volumes
For University of Berlin
President Gives His Complete Works to Roosevelt
Library" There and Press Sees Good
Will in Act

BERLIN. July 1s-Presi6ent Roose-
welt has sent a gift 10 the University OF
Berlin consisting OF his works in nine
volumes, beautifully bound, and bear
ing his autograph
they have been added TO the division
The Washington times., 1907-07-18

opportunity TO make her power felt in
thwarting the schemes OF Sir Philip. Yet
there are many attractive traits 70 this
fascinating adventures. Miss Walker
Will be supported by the Belasco stock
company. with Edward Ellis in the role
Of Sir Philip.
The Washington times., 1907-07-18

Everything is working against the
Pre- sident's plans for a quiet. restful
summer. Now they are working I'D in
terest in the sport of shark hunting
around Oyster Bay. and 1t is said even
TO beat bear hunting.
The Washington times., 1907-07-18
Concerts for Today
At the Barracks
8 p. M.
U. S. SNarine Band
W. N. Smith, Second Leader

March, Men of Robinson
Overture. 'Orpheus''. 1900. OTenbach
Selection, The Singing Girl Herbert
Duet for flute and clarinet. 10.
Hear the Gentle Lark" Bishop
Musicians Jacques Louis Vanpccke
anc Robert z. Seel.
Descriptive Fantasia. The Darkey
CampmeetinS' ----.-.... MIDDLETON
Synopsis-Marching to the camp
meeting: Dance of DE ole
Folks" All Join in the Fun; Wis
ion vivid de ole Folks at Home
Finale.
Mexican Serenade. la Paloma"
Harder
Excerpts from The Merry War"
Strauss
1.-The star-SpangIed Banner"
The Washington times., 1907-07-18

Pennsylvania man was shot by another
mans wife for forgetting to kiss. her.
Every once in while somebody gets
shot for remembering 10 kiss another
mans wife. Perhaps the doctors are
right. after ali. about the danger 20
human life that Is involved in the kiss.
The Washington times., 1907-07-18

known as the Roosevelt Library"
which was founded by Prof. John VIII
lam Burgess.
This gift Is referred 20 today by the
press as an indication OF the good viii
OF the American President toward Ger
many.
The Washington times., 1907-07-18

When feeling disposed to complain
abe at the weather. count twenty and
think what 1t is doing for the crops.
Then take a cool drink.
The Washington times., 1907-07-18
HAVE THE TINES MAILED TO YOU.

Persons leaving Washington for the summer
can have The Times mailed TO them at the
same rate as paid for delivery in the city.
viz. cents a week for the daily edition. or
II cents Tor the daily and Sunday editions.
All mail subscriptions are invariably payable
IN advance Addresses changed as often as
desired.
The Washington times., 1907-07-18
MRS. SAGE'S CHARITIES.

While Mrs. Russell Sage Is doing A
noble work with her money, it is said
by those close TO her personally that
she Is determined that in her giving
she shall do so upon her own initiative,
and viii almost never take a suggestion
from another
The Washington times., 1907-07-18

A Kentucky man who was filed up
with compressed air by jokers died.
Compressed air seems to be even more
dangerous than the hot article.
The Washington times., 1907-07-18

The Times Is served In the city OF Wash
ington and District OF Columbia BY newsboys
who deliver and collect for the paper on
their own account at the rate OF cents n
week for the Evening and cents a copy for
the Sunday edition.
d. C, as second class matter.
The Washington times., 1907-07-18

The annual yield OF Kanoas wheat crop
stories now gives assurance Of breaking
all records.
Durango semi-weekly herald., 1907-07-25

CALI houses have established branches
there, and certain citizens are making
desperate efforts to have them driven
ont.
Resenting an alleged attack upon
his bother, Willard Hawkins, city edi-
tor of the Loveland Herald. assaulted
Frank McMeekin. editor of the Love
land Reporter. The comhatants were
separated and McMeekin said he
would give Hawkins satisfaction that
night. but nothing further has been
heard of the affair.
Begging not to be sent back to a
diet OF baking powder bread and bad
water, Emma Robinson. recently a pa
tient in the insane ward of the county
hospital, was found wandering about
in Eaton and was turned over to the
authorities. The woman has been
missing for several days and. accord.
ing to her story, has been tramplug
through the country.
Mrs. James Pettigo of Fort Collins
received letter containing $500 in
cash and n deed to a house and lot.
In the letter was a brief note. telling
her, in cold. business-like manner.
that the writer intended to desert
his family, and that while he was
heartbroken. yet his infatuation for
another woman was so strong that he
was forced to take the step.
Josephine Rich. the 2-year-old daugh-
ter of Mr.. and Mrs. C. b. Rich of
Grand Junction. was accidentally shot
by Charles Clark. a local insurance
man. Clark was shooting Mt a target
pinned to the barn In the rear of his
home with % caliber rifle when a
bullet struck nail in the barn and
glanced over into the next yard. hit
ting the girl In the breast, The bullet
made only pink mark on the chllds
flesh, not breaking the skin or draw
ing blood
Durango semi-weekly herald., 1907-07-25
GENERAL NEWS.

Presidents of Chicago railroads re.
pudiote the statement accredited %
President Winchell of the Rock Island
that the railroads are out of poluiLs.'
A combine OF lumber dealers in the
northwest is accused in st. Paul of
trying to bankrupt mail order rivals
by causing flood of letters to be sent
to them which demand answers.
Miss Grace Lowe has filed suit i'm
the Alton, ILL.,, city court against a
catering company for $4,000 damages
alleged to have been sustained
through eating ice cream. Il is un.
derstood that six other suits may
follow. Miss Lowe was a member of
the graduating class of the Upper AL.
ton high school. which was entertain
ed at the home of Miss Jennie Rice
The class. ten boys and four girls.
all become i'll.
The wife may not choose where
the family Is to live, but must follow
her husband. provided he treats her
kindly, the Michigan supreme court
says in decision. The court set
aside decree of divorce recently
granted by the lower court TO Mrs. An,
na Wisner, who applied for separation
because her husband went 20 Mexico.
She would not accompany him and he
refused to support her in Detroit. She
obtained divorce on the grounds os
nonsupport Wisner appealed.
Governor Hughes has approved n
bill which makes adultery crime.
punishable as n misdemeanor, with n
fine of $3.50 or six months imprison-
ment in penltentiary or Jail, or by
both. The governor also signed the
bill limiting the expenses of candidates
for public office. Candidates for the
office of governor are limited to slO.-
600; for any other elective state office.
other than a judicial office. $4,000; for
congress or presidential elector. 81
600: state senator, $1,000 for assem-
bly, $1,000. A violation of this act is
made misdemeanor.
In his fight for a recount of the
ballots cast in the mayoralty election
in 1905 William r. Hearst won again
over Mayor Mcclellan. when the aD-
plication of the latter for writ Of
absolute prohibition against a recan-
vass of the votes cast in Kings county
was denied by the appellate division
of the supreme court in Brooklyn. The
decision means that the only further
delay that can be made will De an ap-
plication for a stay, which will prob
ably be made to Judge Maddox in the
supreme court. The stay will only
stop proceedings temporarily, and the
Hearst men declare there is pros
pect of an early recount.
Durango semi-weekly herald., 1907-07-25

account of the hardships and sufer-
ings of those first years OF the colony
and for something more than two cen
turtles these were followed by all his.
torians. Yet he was very robnst
liar, as other contemporary accounts
which have come to light In compara.
lively recent times cohclnsively prnve
Indeed. the pure romance OF much that
he wrote is evidenced by the knowl.
edge we now possess of the Indian
and the utter disagreement OF his own
writings, so say nothing OF the mirac-
ulous incidents he grayelv relates. Yet
Smith remains, in spite OF all the
most romantic figure in our earliest
history. and such Is the fascination
of his individuality that many scholar
ly historians still maintain the essen
tial truth of his narratives. He nm
pears to have been sort of Andrew
Jackson. with Old Hickorys chivalrv
but with a superior gift for mendacious
narratiye-an explosive. domineerlng.
intolerant. opinionated old ire-eater
of indefaugable energy and enterprise
capable of neither fatigue nor fear
He was the one man who seems ia
have profited by experience In the
new world and to have learned les
sons from the wilderness, and alone
of all the band he possessed the re-
source and common sense for leader.
ship that characterized our own later
pioneers.