The farmer and mechanic. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 18??-19??, 1907-03-05

This here pa-apcr says said AFr.
Hcnuessy. that They're Eolu' 80 put =
tax on bachelors. That's fright. Why
shuddeu't there be a tax Oh bachelors 2
There's one on dogs
That's fright" said NJ. Dooley.
An they r. goin' 10 make i fve del
lars a year. Tn dogs pay only two
Its quite a concession ID IA. They con-
slider u more thin twice aS yaIlyabIe.
or anyhow more than twice as danger
Gus as dogs. / uppose " expect next
year to see me throttiu around with a
leather collar ans a brass tag on me
neck. If me tax isn't paid the bachelor
WabouHn come around an tn bachelor
CatCherIl LaSso me an take me to tin
pound an III be kept thsre three day :
an Thin. If still unclaimed I'll be
drowned onless tn pound keeper
takes Il fancy 10 nae.
yen nrver see it. me boy. No. sir.
Is bachelors ar-re = sthroHg body il
men p~olytickally. ~ we'll az handsome
ana brave. If We thry to tax Us Wen
fight ye 10 tn end. If worst comes to
worst we won't pay tn tax. Don yc
think fr a minyIt that light-footed he
roCS that have been eludin' onpriIci-
pied females all their lives wont be
abb. 70 dodge a little thing like a five
dollar tax. There's no clumsy collcc-
tor in IN Wurruld that cud catch up
With a man ~ me age who has avoid
Cd the vaccinations ~ I'll fair fr forty
years an remains unmarrid
An why shud we be taxed We're
til mainstay IL tn Constitution an
about all that remains ~ liberty. If
ye think the highest jooty OF citizen
ship is to raise a family Why don't We
give a vote to tn shad? Who puts
OUT ye'er fire fr ye, who supports TIL
Naytional Government be payin' most
iV tn intarnal rivnOo j~ooties. who
100 = > = -. L "
nortant little childher to. be payin' tn
saloon licenses. VIC does tn fghtin'
Fl We in tn wars but tn bachelors"
TIL marrid men start all tn wars with
loose talk Whin they're on a spree.
But whin war is declared they begin
to think what a tur-r-ble thing 'twud
be if they niver come home to Iheir
1ireside an their wife got marrid again
an their grandchildren an their
Observation-Disclosures an their widow an
tn man that marrid her an his di-
voorced wife an their rilitives, de-
scindantS, friends, an acquaintance
Wud have to live on afther father was
dead and gone with a large piece iv
broken iron in his stomach or back, US
the case might be. but a pension come
fri tn Government. SO, tn day war
is declared We come over here an stick
a sthrange-loOkin' Weepin in me hand
an | close down me shOp an go out
' 80 ~ al
maybe lose me leg defindin' tn hearths
~ me country. me that niver had n
hearth " me own to warm me toes bV
but tn oil stove in me bedroom. An
that's kind iv men we'd be Wantin'
to tax like a pushcar or q COW on
Ecrupulous william,
"Whin We tax tn bachelors We tax
yalOr. Whin We tax tn bachelors We
tax beauty. Ye'vc got to admit hat
We're Il much finer lookin' lot ~ fell
lows thin tn marIid men. hat Why
we're bachelors. Ills With us as With
tn ladies. A lady with an crratic face
is sure to be marrid befure a Dhrcam
~ Beauty. She starts to Wurruk right
away an what Hogan calls tn doc
trine " averages is always With thin
THAT starts early an max many
plays. Blu tn Dhrcam ~ Beauty fig
urcs out that she ear wit an take her
pick an It's not ontil she is bumpin'
thirty that she wakes UP with a
scream to tn p~erilhiv her position an
runs out an pulls q man down fr m
the top iv q bus. Nanny a plain but
determined young woman have / seen
happily narrid an dom tn cookin' f"
d large family Whin her frind who'd
had her pitcher IN the contest fl tn
most beautiful woman in Brighton