Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1907-07-13
A Mark Twain stogey Story.

Well that night at the cluD (tns
Hartford Monday Evening club
meeting-as l was saying-George,
our colored butler, came TO me when
the supper was nearly over, and 1
noticed that he was pale. Normally
his complexion was a clear black and
very handsome, but now 1t had modi-
fed to old amber. He said:
"Mr. Clemens, what are we going
to do. There is not a cigar In the
house but those old Wheeling long
mines Can't nobody smoke them
but you. They kill at thirty yards
IL is too late to telephone-we
couldn't get any cigars out from
town-what can we do? Amt it best
to say nothing and let on that we
didn't think?"
"No," / said, "that would not be
honest Fetch out the long mines"
which he did.
| had Just come across those |
"long mines" few days or a week |
before. When | was a club pilot on
the Mississippi in the sos | had had
n great affection for them because
they were not only-to my mind
perfect, but you could get basket
full OF them for cent-or n dime
they didn't use cents out there In
those days. So when / saw them ad-
vertised. in Hartford / sent for
Thousand at once. They came out to
ME i'm badly battered and disreputa-
Ible looking old square pasteboard
boxes, two hundred In a box. George
brought n box, which was cayed In
on all sides, looking the worst IL
could, and began to pass them
laround. The conversation had been
brilliantly animated up to that mo-
ment-but now frost fell upon each
man as he took up a cigar and held
Iit poised in the alr-and there, In
1.-The middle, his sentance broke on.
That kind OF thing went on all
around the table until when George
had completed his crime the whole
place was full of thick solemnity
and silence.
Those men began to light the
cigars. Rev. Dr. Parker was the first
man to light. He took three or four
heroic whiffs-then gave it up. He
got up with the remark that he had
Ia go to the bedside of a sick par
ishloner. He started out. Rev Dr.
Burton was the next man. He TOOK
only one whiff and followed Parker
He furnished a pretext, and you could
see by the sound of his voice that
he didn't think much Of the pretext
and was vexed with Parker for get
ting in ahead with fictitious ailins
client. Rev. Mr.. Twiehell. followed
5 and said he had to go now because
he must take the midnight train for
, Boston. Boston was the first place
, that occurred 10 him, suppose.
II was only a quarter to eleven
> when they began to distribute pre-
9 texts. At ten minutes to eleven al
!. the people were out of the house
= When nobody was left but Georg'
, and me | was cheerfull-I had ne
n icompunctions of conscience, no grieti
lof any kind. But George was beyond
Z speech, because he held the homo
and credit of the family above hi
own and he was ashamed that thi
: smirch had been put upon 1t. toll
n him to go to bed and try to sleel
q Il on. | went to bed myself. A
d breakfast In the morning whel
= George was passing a cup OF conee
. saw It tremble in his hand. kne'
4 by that sign that there was some
4 thing on his mind. He brought IN
3 cup TO me and asked impressively'
z "Mr. Clemens, how far Is II fror
y the door to the upper CATER
q I said, at is a hundred and twer
= ty-fiye steps"
. He said, "Mr Clemens, You ca
4 start at the front door and you ca
4 go plumb TO the upper gate and trea
4 on one of them cigars every time"
u 1t wasn't true in detail, but in O.
4 sentials II was.-From Mark Twain
4 Autobiography in The North Amer
. can Review for April 10.