Charlevoix county herald., 1907-06-22
HE HELD THE TRAIN
But How or Why He
Could Not Explain

the south one night last week, and
some of the second-splitters in the
lowers had begun to make remarks
about the people who wouldn't keep
their cows at home, before there was
any getaway racket from the choo-
choo But it's a wonder the train left
at all. There was a great man at the
station that night, and the train was
held for him, though he didn't take it
after all. This was the way of it.
On that particular evening local
newspaper man who hadn't travelled
much since the /. c. G. got the legis-
lative hypodermic, went down to the
station to meet his home-bound spouse
who'd been doing some family visit
ing up near Smokeville. Her train was
due at 6:19. but his watch was dizzy,
and he landed at the main gate an
easy half hour ahead of time.
Leave me hurdle the barrier" he
suggested mildly to the blue back of
the fat gateman. "My wife is coming
home, and | want to wait by the par
allels and give her the grand clutch
Pullman's little wagon"
Nope" replied the fat gateman
without turning around. Its against
the rules"
But" suggested the newspaper
man not so mildly. I've got a no.
ton I'm going out there, and"
But he didn't have time to finish.
hn 1:
a real crushing look and swung
around. A second later that gate
mans best friends wouldn't have
known him. He got red in the face,
then white, then red again, lifted his
lid, bowed and swung the gate open
so fast its hinges smoked, remarking,
with a sickly grin: "You will have
your little joke, sir"
The newspaper man drifted through
in hazy dream effect, and began
walking up and down the platform,
wondering whether he wouldn't better
so back and hand the fat gateman
one on the nose for his real fresh,
funny actions. But he noticed that
the gateman had called some more
uniforms to his side, and that the
bunch had their heads together, think
ing in whispers and looking in his
direction.
The newspaper man began to get
worried. He looked himself over, dis
covered that he was wearing his
shoes, that he hadn't forgotten his
shirt, and that there were no signs
hanging around his person. And he
had just about decided to register a
diagnosis of congenital lunacy against
the crowd when one of the uniforms
wobbled toward him.
as there anything I can do for
your he inquired.
The newspaper man, pretty we'll
convinced that somebody was trying
to get gay with him, scowled fero-
ciously. mot thing" he replied,
grouchily, whereupon the official said:
Thank you, sir" and went away look
ing as happy as a Boston broker on a
copper holiday.
About a minute later a portly per-
son in uniform steamed up, nodded re-
specially and touched his hat.
mo. 6 is pretty nearly on time, sir"
he remarked.
Telephone that up to the Office"
said the newspaper man, shortly. Its
worth an extra edition any day"
And at that particular moment he
began to feel light in the head. For
the effect of that little pleasantly on
TOT
fearful to behold. He curled up and
laughed and uncurled and laughed
some more. And after he was all
through laughing he went trotting
around the station telling that re-
mark to all the uniforms in sight
and the train shed was certainly a real
hilarious place for awhile.
But five minutes later the uniform
ed person steamed back, looking pes
tered in the head, and did another
lowly approach.
BEG pardon, sir" he said, "but
when l saw you come in / wired down,
and there's a drawing-room on six be-
ing saved for you"
That's mighty thoughtful, re-
piled the newspaper man, and the
person did another departure, purring
as contentedly as a Maltese cat.
Then No. steamed in, and for the
next 20 or % minutes the newspaper
man got dippier every second. Every
attache of the station had their lamps
glued on him all the time. and he be-
gan to feel as prominent as ]. Diggum
Rockefeller and John Alexander Dowie
rolled into one. But the air was full
of tension. Seventeen people in uni
form stood around looking as if they'd
like to suggest something II they
dared, and finally one of them drifted
up looking trembly about the chin,
and gave a preliminary cough:
BEG pardon, sir; excuse me for
mentioning it, and I'm sorry to dis
turb you," he said at length, "but