davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-14

well, how did you get along at your
first appearance?" asked a man of a
friend who had just Joined the theatrical
profession.
"Oh. 1 got on well enough" was the re-
ply. but I couldn't get of half quick
enough"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-14

A Scotchman in New Zealand was CIV
ing a visitor some account of his exper-
fences during the the earthquake shock.
Il suppose" remarked the visitor sit was
rather surprise for you to find the
-crockery jumping off the shelves"
AYE. it was that. But the wife wiss
mair surprised still. I've been marrit near
thirty years, an it's ABBOTT the only trou-
BILE in the hose she hisna blamed me
for
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-14
Very Tricky.


AT Hamilton. N. Y. where Colgate
university honored him with the de-
gree of doctor of laws. Justice Gaynor
said that America had embarked on
the greatest era of economic reform in
Ter history; that stock was no longer
to be watered without limit, and that
railroads were no longer to be con-
Quoted as private roads.
Let us hope" said Justice Gaynor,
That honesty will eventually take the
place of smartness in all businesses.
Let us hope that straightforward
methods will some day succeed like
tricky ones.
When I think Of some of our sue
eessful men in the past and of their.
tricky methods. I think Of a valet in
the employ of a friend of mine
This valet was brushing his mas
ter's clothes one morning, when he
found silver dollar in a new waist
coat. AS he transferred the coin to
his own purse. a maid saw the valet
take out his penknife, ana heard him
mutter to himself:
It's a thousand pfties for the
waistcoat, but there's nothing else to
be done. must make a hole in this
pocket big enough for the dollar to
slip through "a
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-14
GOING TOO FAR

We have stood for Maf1as and Black
Hands and other things, but the Huncha-
kists are going too far.-Pittsburg Dis
patch.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-14

What books have helped you most?"
asked the sincere and serious young wo-
man.
'''I can't recall all of EN-" answered
Mr. Brown, but they were mostly stories
with love and fighting in them. You see.
was in the bookselling business when 1
began to get prosperous"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-14

Friend--But suppose your party were to
throw you overheard, dear boy?
Promising Young Politician Gull of con-
fidence)-Well. 1 should have strength to
swim to the other side. old chap.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-14

What is this Esperanto hear people
talking about?''
The universal language"
Who speaks 1t %
Nobody that 1 know off,
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-14

Hostess-Yes, the walls of our flat are
so thin that my husband and learned
the deaf and dumb alphabet.
Friend-What for?
HosteSs-So that we could quarrel with
out being overheard by the neighbors.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-14

Governess (who has told her small pupil
the story of THE Fox and the Grapes")-
Now. isn't that a clever story. Ethel?
Ethel-Clever? Not a Bit That fox
was nothing but goose He pretended
the grapes were our;what he should have
said was. ooh, what beautiful grapes So
tempting and so sweet! But my doctor has
told me never to eat sweet things, so 1
must refrain"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-14

Lily-Wasn't there a romance connected
with their engagement?
Rose-Oh. yes; they both romanced
about their wealth.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-14

Mother-Tommy. what did I say I'd do
if you touched that jam again?
Tommy-Why, it's funny, ma, that you
should forget, too. I'm bothered if can
remember
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-14
HUNOR or THE Day

Mrs Goodley-Gracious: Just listen to
that clergyman! I'm positive he's swear
ing. Evidently he's missed his vocation.
Mr.. Goodley-No; 1 think It was his
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. Press.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-14

Doctor-In time this trouble will effect
your mind.
Fair Patient Gin tone of relief)-I was
afraid it would compel me to bive up So
ciety.
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28

1s08-Adelphia theater, London, opened. 1S25-Nicholas I. succeeded to the throne of Russia. 1838-London university instituted. 1S3S-Mexico declared war against France
 1S41-Colossal statue of Washington placed in the national capitol. 1S44-Queen Alexandra of England born. 1555-Great meeting in London In aid of Florence Nightingale hospital fund. 185S-Joint French and Spanish expedi- tion to Cochin China announced. 1661-Jefferson Davis elected President of the Confederate States of Amer lea. Gen. Mcclellan directed the observance of the Sabbath in all the camps of the U. S. army. 1662-Battle of Crane Hill, Ark. 1S63-Confederates made heroic attempt to carry Knoxville by storm. 1S64-Gen. Hood attacked the Union troops under Gen. Schofeld at Frank lin, Tenn.
 1s65-Habeas corpus act restored in the Northern States. 1870-First London school board estab- Hshed.
 1S71-Jem Mace and Joe Coburn engag- ed in prize fight near New Orleans without decisive result. 1ss9-Minneapolis Tribune building burned, with loss of several lives. ... LNrz t. 4 in property.
 1691-Edmund Dc Leon, e1-United States consul general In Egypt, died ....Lunatic attempted to assassinats Rev. Dr. John Hall in New York. 1692-Loubet ministry in France resign ed on the Panama scandal issue. 1ss7-Austrian ministry resigned owing to disorders in the Reichsrath. ls9S-Steamer Portland. from Boston to Portland, Me-, foundered in a gale of Capt Cod, with loss of 113 lives. Battleship Wisconsin launch cd at San Francisco. 1se9-Harpers' publishing house, New York, failed.
 1e00-German government intimated to MT. Kruger that visit to Berlin would be inopportune. 1e01-Many persons killed In wreck on Wabash railroad. 1e02-United States Supreme Court de nied a petition for an injunction against the State board of canvass CTS of Virginia on behalf of negroes disfranchised by the new State con- stitution.
 190HJapanese made general attack on Russian forts at Port Arthur. ... The Japanese captured 203-Me Hill at Port Arthur.
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28
Gas Mantles Only Ashes.

The gas mantle Is nothing but ashes, and 1t Is wonderful how science makes Its particles cling together as long as they do.
 The gas mantle was invented by 6 chemist of Vienna. He noticed the h. tense light given out by small quan- tity of thorium thrown into a stove In his laboratory. He realized the Import ance of the discovery, and in 1880 be- gan a series of experiments to utilize this remarkable quality of the element In intensifying light. He found that pure thurlum would not cohere well enough to be of use, and he then began searching for combination of sle- ments that would answer.
 In 1887 he produced his first mantles, but they were so delicate that they could not be transported and were de- livered by hand. A boy was trusted to carry two, one In each hand, for de- livery about the streets of Vienna. In the early sos he found that good mantle could be made from a combina- ton of the two substances, thorium oxide and cerium oxide, and that coating of collodion would give suf- fcient frmness to allow It to be trans ported. Since then gas mantles have gone into general use In nearly all parts of the world and thousands of factories are producing them
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28

Bulgaria has 3,SUO centenarlans, about one to every 1000 inhabitants. Rumania has 1,0S4 and Servia 573. Stu dents of longevity records In Europe are asking why the countries least ad- vanced in hygenic standards lead thus in the tables of the centenarians. The United States, with a population then of more than 78,OOOOO0, had by the cen- sus of 1900 more than $500 centenari- ans, making about one-twentieth of the ratio shown In Bulgaria. No answer has ever been given in the case of an individual centenarian which would stand the tests of the 100-year class in general. One person will say abstinence kept him strong, another that moder-
 ste drinking helped him. Tobacco will have been abjured on this hand, the pipe have been a comforter on that. Sometimes to a life of hard work or again to preservative days of leisure will the credit be given.
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28

 <eRMdNd
~~O0O0oN~~

Tom Masson's forthcoming book. "The Won Blumers," deals with married life. He leaves the romances of the very youthful to others, but finds TO- nance enough, as well as vast fund of humor, in the marital relation. Yet "The Von Blumers" is not without the music of wedding bells.
 A western poet sent the Chicago Rec ord Herald a poem entitled "The Lay of Setting Hen," but the editor was too old a bird to be caught with chaff. He referred the matter to an expert In henology and returned the manuscript to tue brazen-cheeked author with a severe reprimand and the information that setting hens do not lay.
 Typographical errors," said William Dean Howells, the famous novelist, "are always amusing. When I was boy In my fathers printing office, In Martins Ferry, once made good typographical error. My father had written: The showers last week, though copious, were not sufficient for the millmen.' I set 1t up 'milkmen.' Chicago Inter Ocean.
 Harvey J. O'Hlggins' "Don-a- Dreams," 1t Is said, will prove altogeth- CT different from anything he has be- fore published. It Is the romance of a Canadian lad, "a lover, a poet, a gentle solitary" who seeks his fortune in New York. Bohemian New York Is described and the characters in- clude gifted and visionary dramatist, prominent manager, clever and flip pant dramatic critic, and "the most beautiful woman on the American stage"
 Hamlin Garland, who has been spending some time abroad since his illness of last spring, returned to his home at West Salem, Wis, the last week in September. MT. Garland is now In good health and spirits, and at work on a travel skit, to be called "A Trailer's Impressions of Europe" wherein he takes one of his western characters through France, Italy, Switzerland and Scotland. It Is to be in the western vernacular, but not in dialect, and will probably take the form of Colorado miners talk to his friends. It will form a very candid and direct statement of the way In which the Old World strikes deeply prejudiced observer from the New. A new volume of choice selections from Mark Twain's writings will be published shortly by the Harpers un. der the title of ''The $30OOO Request" A great number of these stories have never before appeared in book form, and among them are some of the very best that the humorist has ever done; such as his "St. Joan of Arc." publish ed in Harper's Magazine; Italian Without a Master" Italian With Grammar" Amended Biographies" Advice to Little Girls" ''The Danger of Lying," "Post-Mortem Poetry," "Ths Five Boons of Life," "A Helpless Situ- ation," and others. The very touching and tender story of Cromwell's time, ''The Death Disk" Is also included These stories, with additional material mostly from his recent writings-wiL | make up fat volume.
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28

Aull of the boat from the bow to the Itern are two endless chains. On these .hains are a number of propellins blades. The chains pass in and out of openings in the hull fore and aft, and Ire guided by sprocket wheels by which
 he chains are propelled. The chains ,n opposite sides of the craft are driv- Independently from the engine. In or. Ter to turn quickly, one chain can oe driven forward and the other toward he stern. When moving forward or backward both chains are driven in the ,ama direction
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28
My boy, there are two classes in o.

My boy, there are two classes h O. ciety, the class that lifts and the class that leans. They that lift are the ones who do the worlds work. The leaning class are they who depend upon the exertlon of others and do the gruntins and fault-nnding and complaining. My boy, be a litter and you will have little time to fuss about the failings of oth- CTS. It's the fellow in the lodge that shirks his duty who makes the most trouble and 1t Is the same In the church and in society in general
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28
Deafness Cannot Be Cured

by local applications as they cannot reach the way 10 cure dealness and that is by eonstitu- Honal remedies. Deainess is caused by an in- fam d condition of the mucous lining of the ing, and when it is entirely closed, Deafness is the res ut, and unless the Inflammation can be taken out and this tube re toIed to its normal condition, hearing will be destroyed forever; min cases out of ten are caused by Catarrh, which is notting but an inhamed condition of themucous surfaces.
 We will give One Hundred Dollars for any case of Deafness (caused by catarrh) that can not be cured by Halls Catarrh Cure. Send for circulars, free.
 F. J. CHENEY & CO.,, Toledo, O. Sold by Druggists 75c.
 Halls Family Pills are the best.
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28
GHOnZS
 @IlEeE'
~~~~N~~~~~

Gov. Proctor of Vermont has signed the bill providing for the consolidation of the school systems of neighborins towns under one superintendent.
 Registration statistics of leading east ern universities are as rollows: Harvard, 6,272; Columbia, 4,965; Pennsylvania, 8,980; Cornell, 3,461; Yale, 8,210; Princeton, 1884.
 The anual report of the London coun- ty council shows that the city schools have been maintained at an outlay of 25,00O,OO0, md that there are 10000 teachers for an average school attend apce of 669,167. The salaries for head teachers range from S7OO to S2,OOO, and for assistants from $325 to SS75. Each teacher has charge of forty-three children on an average.
 By a decision of the Supreme Court oi the State of Washington legal authority upholds the efforts of school officials to check the abuse of secret fraternities and societies in public high schools. A local board had forbidden pupils to join a Sc cret fraternity, and as a penalty for dis. obedience denied to offenders certain priv. ileges In the social life of the school, but did not limit in any way the essential educational rights. Action was brought In behalf of the fraternity to restrain the school board from deprivng the pupils of these privileges. The trial court denied tho application for an injunction, and the Supreme Court sustained the denial. The court says that the evidence lover whelmingly establishes the fact that such fraternities do have a marked influence on the school, tending to destroy good or der, discipline and scholarship. This be- Ing true, the board is authorized, and 1t l. its duty, to take such reasonable and appropriate action by the adoption of rules as will result in preventing these influences"
 The St. Paul board of education has approved the suggestion of Supt. Heeter In favor of corporal punishment, to be administered only by the principal of the school after permission in writing has been obtained from parents or guardian. The first ten years since Princeton college became Princeton university have just ended and the report shows that the endowment has increased from $1,677, ,S71 to $3,284, 900. The campus area has in- creased from 225 to 53S acres, and the student body has grown from 1,O45 to 1884, while the faculty has increased erom 62 to 1e6
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28
Thorourhly Reliable.

If ever there was a reliable and safe remedy 1t is that old and famous porous plaster-Allcock's It has been in use for sixty years, and is as popular today as ever. and we doubt if there Is a civil ized community on the face of the globe whore this wonderful pain reliever can not be found. In the selection of the Ingredients and in their manufacture the greatest care Is taken to keep each plas- ter up to the highest standard of excel lence, and so pure and simple are the ingredients that even a child can use them.
 Allcocks are the original and genuine porous plasters and are sold by Drug gists in every part of the civilized world
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28

Plans for the proposed giant battle tary of the navy by constructors who have availed themselves of the oppor- tunity to compete for the floating for tress. Very little Is known of any plans for the gigantic ship, which, II Is assumed, will have a displacement of at least 10000 tons. All plans are to be submitted to Congress, which Is to pass on the navy departments action Indenniteness marked every part of the appropriation bill relating to the new warshlp, which Is described by the bill as "a frst-class battle ship, carrying as heavy armor and as powerful arma- ment as any known vessel of its class, to have the highest practicable speed and greatest practicable radius of ac- ton and to cost, exclusive of armament and armor, not exceeding $6.00o, ,OOo."
 It seems strange, and not altogether pleasing, that the United States govern ment, as represented In the Navy De pdTlueul, buOulu uo oollSCN " ee 4A@S the show busine. to encourage enlist ments The lateit and most successful scheme is the moving picture machine which shows the life of the bluejacket on shipboard, and some of 1t on land. The advertising value of the plan lies In the readiness and completeness by which 1t enables the recruiting officers to give applicants or possible applicants an accurate idea of their duties and pleasures. It is especially eficacioui in the West, where less Is known about life at sea- A recruiting party in Ne braska lately displayed the moving pic lures to a crowd of fifteen thousand Veopla
 Mrs. Eddy would confer a favor by letting the world know whether she still favors 1t with her presence.-Phil-
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28

so weakened and generally run down with kidney dis ease that for a long time I could not do my work and was five weeks in bed. There was continu- al bearing down pain, terrible back aches, headaches
 and at times dizzy spells when every thing was a blur
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28
THE BLACK BALL.

Clever Scheme That Was spoiled
 in the Drawing.
 Two young men in a French village were called on to draw for conscrip- ton. One only was wanted to com plete the number, and of the two who were to draw one was the son of rich farmer and the other the child of a poor widow.
 The farmer ingratiated himself with the superintendent of the ballot and promised him a present If he could find means to prevent his son from going In the army. In order to accomplish this the official put Into the urn two black balls instead of one white and one black ball. When the young men came, he said:
 There are two balls, one black and one white, In the urn. He who draws the black one must serve. Your turn is first" pointing to the widows son.
 The latter, suspecting that all was not fair, approached the urn and drew one of the balls, which he immediately swallowed without looking at It
 "Why," said the superintendent, have you done that? How are we to know whether you have drawn . black or a white ball?"
 "Oh, that's very easy to discover" was the reply. "Let the other now draw. If I have the black, he must necessarily draw the white one"
 There was no help for 1t, and the farmers son, putting his hand Into the urn, drew the remaining ball, which, to the satisfaction of the spectators, was . black one.
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28
"Fonetfcs" Cause a "Fire.n

What has become of Hank? In. uulred the man who was selling wind. mills.
 "HankT drawled the old farmer. "Why, Hank Is suffering from a bad spell"
 You don't say. Rheumatism
 Worse than that, neighbor. You see Hank tried to spell his words the way President Roosevelt dictated, an his boss thought he couldn't spell at all an fired m."-Boston Post.
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28
Pork Cake.

Chop pound of fat salt pork so small that 1t Is like powdered suet, scald 1t with half pint of boiling water, add a pound of dark brown sugar. a cup of New Orleans molasses, a pound each of raislns and dates chopped and a quarter pound of minced citron. Stir In enough sifted flour to make 1t of the consistency of cake batter and add a teaspoonful each of powdered nutmeg, cloves, allspce and cinnamon. Bake In loaf tin In steady oven until straw comes out clean from the center of the loaf.
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28
Oyster BoufIlon.

Cook a quart of oysters in their own juice for half an hour, closely covered. Drain and chop the oysters fine, put ting them back into the liquor. Add three pints of water, cook half an hour longer, and strain through cheesecloth. Season and serve with whipped cream on top like clam bouillon.
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28
Mnrshmallow FrostinR.

Buy enough marshmallow candy to cover the top of the cake when set closely together. Have boiled icing ready and pour over the candy. As the Icing cools 1t will hold the marshmal- lows together. Before the candies are laid over the cake they must be set In tho oven to heat and swell
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28

A Chicago woman claims that her husband has her hypnotized. If she can show that he makes her think she never ought to ask him to match any thing at the dry goods stores 1t will have to be admitted that he exercises 6 curious spell over her.
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28

An Alaska woman announces mat she will find the north pole, which prompts the impertinent pert para grapher of the Washington Post to say that she will look under the bed for 1t.
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28
Canned Lima Beans.

Shell the beans, cook for fifteen min utes In slightly salted boiling water, take from the pot with perforated spoon and pack them In jars standing in an outer vessel of boiling water. Boil up the liquor in the kettle, skim It and pour 1t, still boiling, Into tho jars, filling these to overfowlng and sealing immediately.
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28
Equipped for Running,

"Isn't 1t awful" remarked Growells, looking over his gas bill for the last quarter; "isn't 1t surprising how gas bills run up?"
 "Not 90 surprising" replied Kidder, considering how many thousand feet they have."-Philadelphia Press.
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28
DRIVEN BY PADDLE CHAINS,

New Method of PropeIling Motos
 Boats and Ships.
 Instead of employing the convention. l screw propeller or the paddle wheel ,n motor boats, an inventor of Hayti has evolved an entirely new principle Ills unique invention Is shown in the Illustration below. Passing around the
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28
Canned Pumpkin.

Peel and cut the pumpkins into bits, put 1t over the fire and stew as for pie. When very soft strain through colander, return to the fire, boil up hard and pour 1t into heated cans, filling each to overfowing with the liquid Stand upside down in q cool dark placa
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28

The good book says something about "All men being hars." The only trou. ble is the statement is too narrow. It should have included women and chil. dren
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28
Best of Reasons.

"Why are you late for breakfast, sIrT asked Bobby's father, as the boy slid quietly into his chair.
 "Well, you see," explained Bobby, "when you called me I was having a mighty funny dream. and just slept few minutes longer to finish it."- puck
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28

I had Catarrh for about fifteen years, and no man could have been worse. I tried everything l could hear of, but no good TO: could see ' a nttie e imnrcvem;ent ni F; S; sna from the first bottle, and after taking it a short while was cured. This was six years ago, and I am as we'll today as any man. I think Catarrh Is Q blood disease, and know there is nothing on earth better for the blood than 8. 8. 8. Nobody thinks more of 8. 8. s. than I do. M, MATSON.
 Lapeer, Mich.
Alaska sentinel., 1907-03-28

before me. The passages of the kidney secretions were irregular and painful, and there was considerable sediment and odor. I don't know what l would have done but for Doan's Kidney Pills. I could see an improvement from the first box, and five boxes brought final cure."
 Sold by all dealers. 50 cents box. Foster Milburn Co.,. Buffalo. N. Y.