Omaha daily bee., 1907-01-28
SAY THEY WON'T TREAT, BUT.
cOnsressmen Are Under Suspicion in q
BsW Society.
NICE POINT IN IT'S GOVERNING LAW
Anti-rreatinE society started In
WashinstOn-Its Membership Grow
Ing RaPidIy-Need of Amended
Rules Discovered.

SNSANNs was OEEdulLeu IN washington uh
new Years day. The original members
formed rather a small group. but now the
OUTFIT has become so formidable in num-
bers that the booze grafters Of Washing.
ton, who are known as bell weevils, are in
despair. The organization now includes
considerable number Of senators and repre-
sentatives.
No member has yet been held up TO gen
eral vitupera ton as a deserter from the
cause, but many Of the accounts of skillful
evasions of the basic principle of the outfit
are being whispered about Two or three
prominent congressman are under suspic-
ion.
One of these is an extremely we'll known
representative from the south, from Mis-
sissippi, in fact, who, shortly after the re-
converting Of congress following the holi-
days, was visited by a prominent planter
or his state. 1t was, OF course, up to the
representative to take hts friend around.
The representative apprehended how fu-
tile IL would be for him to endeavor to
explain to the planter that he was de-
barred from stalking him to a few drinks
because he was a member Of the Anti
Treating society. So before starting out
! he telephoned to the manager of Wash
ington house OF call noted throughout the
land for the excellence of it's liquor and
for the vast network Of spider webs that
hangs from its rafters.
How the Thing Arose.
Say George" the representative tele-
phoned I'm going to be over there d.
rectly with friend from my state. He
likes corn liquor How are you fixed for
corn liquor todayP"
"Hossheads OF 1t, SIR" replied the man
ager at the phone. Smooth as panne
velvet, fragrant as jasmine, mellow as"
"Um-very good interrupted the repre-
sentative. We'll, you know, George, I'm
a member Of that Anti"
Come right over SIR" broke In the
manager you'll be taken care Of"
So the representative and HE planter
! friend strolled over to the spider web sa-
loon. number of the anti-treaters
were lined up at the bar, buying them
selves drinks. The representative looked
trihe hangdoG at sight of his fellow
members. but his emba rrassment was only
! momentary.
II wish you'd try some of this, SIR" said
the manager to the representative, plant
ing bottle of superfine corn liquor on the
bar. IT'S just in from North Carolina
and It's been slowed in cellar there for
eighteen years and"
| "Nii' Sdiu representative i We
friend here from my state who is a con-
noisseur in corn liquor and maybe he'll
be able to tell you whether this article
The two men poured out their drinks.
tossed them away and smaclxed their lips.
Very choice. suh" observed the planter.
| Tastes like mo-" and he picked up the
bottle to pour himself another one
| Like it," said thu manager Just then,
saving the situation "Well, our best
wishes for Happy New Year go with that
gu and a couple other quarts OF the same
that we've put aside for you. Like little
carbonic with it this sinner rs.-. ..s
Trouble Follows Content
Then the representative and his planter
friend adjourned 10 one of the tables with
a quart of the corn liquor and a bottle of
carbOnic and enjoyed a reminiscent hour.
The anti-treaters viewed the proceed
ings with some gravity of mfen, but it was
clearly a case in which the manager OF the
saloon did the treating. and. as such. called
for no action. But they straightway got
| together and rectifcd an omission in their
one rule. They caused Il to read that nc
member should treat anybody, nor should
he accept a treat from anybody.
| The representative was informed of the
new reading OF the rule before the day
was over. He had nothing to do but prom.
Use that he would abide by the amended
rule.
That same evening no again dropped into
the spider web oasis with his planter
friend. The manager met them as soon az
they entered. Again a large number OF
the anti-treaters were present purcha sins
libations for themselves.
Here is a package that was left here
for you a minute or so after you went
out this afternoon by a gentleman who
had just arrived from Tennessee said
the manager to the representative "Ht
said he didn't know your address, but he
had such an admiration for your work IT
congress that he was impeled to leave
this little gift, commemorative of the
season, for you, in my care" and the man
ager handed the package over to the rep
resentative, VINO undid II and found It tC
contain two quarts of an exceedingly rar'
and choice brand OF Tennessee whisky.
Antis in the Game.
Instantly several OF the anti-treaters sur
rounded the representative politely bu
firmly demanding that he return the two
quarts of liquor to their donor through
the manager. Thus the cat was let GU
OF the bag and the planter friend wal
made aware OF the representatives pre-
dlcament. To the representatives. chagrin
the planter instantly went over to thu
side OF the anti-treaters and Joined will
them in insisting that the representativ,
was bound by the amended rule.
The representative sought, by Learned
quibbling, in which he showed his fni
knowledge OF the law, 70 show that goodi
In bulk. or IN the original package, coulC
by no process OF reasoning be termed /.
treat" He maintained that treat neces
sarily meant a dram. the dram being Of
whatever dimensions the user thereof chos'
to make II.
He sternly declared that It was who'll,
impossible TO regard two quarts of liquo
as anything remotely resembling the thlnl
commonly known as a treat. Thus declar
ing. he stood upon his fundamental right Il
carry the two quarts over into a corne
and. at one OF the tables. imbibs the tive
quarts. any reasonable amount thereof
with his planter friend.
On a vote by the anti-treaters presen
the representative was beaten in this con
tention. To his profound depression n,
planter Joined with the anti-treaters in vot
ing him down.
Cornered. the representative. with tn
hghting instinct OF a lawyer who finds him
self in a hole. sought another method t.