Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-08-10

44-EsE}fz'sz

Quite unearthly.-The Bystander.
He with a sigh Il have only one
friend on earth--my dog. She-why
don't you get another dog Chicago
Daily News.
Citiman-Yes, she's married to real
estate agent, and good, honest fellow,
too. Subbubs-(IOod gracious. Big
amy, eh2-Philadelphia Press.
Johnny, doesn't your conscience tell
yoa that you are doing wrongT' Yes,
mother, but father said wasn't to be-
lieve everything | heard."-Punch.
Patience you ever hear the
Duette sisters sing in concert? Patrice
Ma; one always seems to be little
ahead of the other.-Yonkers States-
man.
NO, | don't care for English opera"
why not?" Because it bothers me to
listen to what the singers are saying
when l want to talk Cleveland Plain
Dealer.
Nell-She always said she wanted a
husband who was easily pleased. Bess
Did she get such a one? Nell--Why,
yes; didn't he marry her?--Lipplncott's
Magazine.
Il should think" she said. that golf
ing would make you awfully tired"
mo, stand II frst rate You see,
never keep my score at all."--Chicago
Record Herald.
Church. see that Argentine has q
54mile horse railway. 1t Is the long
est in the world. Gotham~-Gee! Think
of holding on to strap for "a miles -
Yonkers Statesman.
II must get you another chair for the
Kitchen, Katie; ! see you have only
one" Sure, you needn't mind, ma am.
| have none but gintleman callers. -
Yonkers Statesman.
I'm going to put a fender on tho
front OF my runabout." $50 you wont
run over some one?" Nope. So 1t
won't hurt the radiator when l do
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Wigwag That's fine dog of yours,
Saphedde. Saphedde Yes, indeed, he
is. That dog knows as much as l do.
Wigwag-rl give you quarter for
hIm.-Phlladelphla Record.
Excuse me, sir, but this Is the sixth
time that you have gone away without
paying" "Oh. my dear young lady,
when a man sees you he forgets every
thing else. "-Fliegende Blaetter
Lady Customer wish to tell you
how these shoes of mine are to be
made. Shoemaker-Oh, | know that
well enough large inside, and small
outside. Meggendorfer Blaetter.
oh! Willie. what's this queer look
| in thing with about a million legs"
That's a millennium It's somethn'
| like centennial, only II has more
legs. Natural History" In Life.
Nell-Y Yes, she said her husband mar
ried her for her beauty. What DO you
think of that2 Belle--Well, think
her husband must feel like widower
nOw.--Catholc Standard and Times
Blinks-The first principle of an
archm Is to divide with your fell0fy
principle Is to make your fellow man
divide with You. Chicago Daily News.
Hotel Proprietor Has not the man
In No. - received his bill YETI Head
Waiter-Ccrtanly Fifteen minutes
ago. Strange! hear him still sling
ing In his room. ~ Meggendorfer Blact-
ter
Tired Tatters i saw de new moon
over me left shoulder las night
wonder wot OATS sign wv Weary
Walker-Its sign dat de mex place
yousc ask fer work youse1I git it
Chicago Daily News
Mr. phoxy Did you send the Borems
card for our TAT homer MrR
Phoxy--Yes; how could get out of III
Mr.. Phoxy-I'll tell Borem that jerks
In coming. Borem owes him money
Terre Haute Tribune
"Ahl pretty lady" said the fortune
teller, you wish TO be told about your
future husbandT' Not much" replied
Mrs Galley. i've come to learn where
my present husband is when he's abb
sent ~ Philadelphia Press.
Husband (explainng his late home
coming) My dear, couldn't help II.
just missed the last car aud had TO
wait forty minutes. Wife-Now don't
blame 1t on the street ear company.
They've troubles enough without you
Detroit Free Press
Hawklns-Oh, well, Bjenks isn't such
a bad fellow. after all. Dawkins-
What makes you say that? Hawkins
Well he wouldn't lend me the $40 that
asked him for but be didn't take adj.
vantage Of the opportunity to give me
good advice. Somerville Journal