Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-02-16
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Doctor, what is good to take to cure
the redness of my nose?" The pledge"
Houston Post.
knicker-primitive men plowed the
earth with sharpened stick. Booker
You don't mean TO say golf dated
back that far IS Scissors.
The doctors have finally agreed
upon the cause of Jink's Illness" Did
they hold another consultation ?" NO
Il post-mOrtem. Headlight
Here, hold my horse minute, will
yOu?" "Sir! I'm Il member of Con-
gress - Never mind You look hon
est. I'll take chance Courier
Journal.
Mrs. Henpeck shame on you for
growing about DR. Bous. Didn't he
Just bring you back from the jaws of
death and Henpeck (wearily) And
back TO the Jaws Of Borrowed
Woman Now. II you don't leave at
once III call my husband and he's an
old Harvard football player. Tramp
Lady, IL yer love him don't call him
out | used 10 play wild Yale.-Judge
Cynthia Oh. what world this is
for woman; do wish the Lord had
made me man! Molly why, my
dear, maybe he did aud you just
haven't found him yet.--American
Spectator.
'"Fhora 10 .,,SI,. .,u., orJuInaI r,Iso{np-
ary In the world for 90O,00 heathens,
your excellency," said the cannibal.
We'll, | got mine" said the canuibal
chief, rubbing his lips ~Yonkers
Statesman.
John. dear" wrote lady from the
continent. IL enclose the hotel bill"
Dear Jane. enclose a check" wrote
John In reply. but please don't buy any
more hotels Mt this price they are rob
hing you - rit-Bits
"Why don't you let Willie play in the
street with the rest OF the kids?" said
Mr.. Wise. I'm afraid 1t will spoil his
clothes!' was the wife's answer
"Thunderatlon :" exclaimed Wise I'VE
can buy clothes, but we can't buy
brains Clipped.
Mrs. Dennis Ito her husband who
smells strong escape of gas some
where aud is about TO strike match)
You're never after looking for leak
wild lighted match, Mick2 Nick
Hould your whist They're safety
matches Half Holiday.
Doctor. can't You give me something
to relieve my sleeplessness| Yes; |
could prescribe sedatiye, hut drugs
would do you nS real good. Instead Of
that let me recommend a large fat
onion, TO he eaten raw just before go
Ing TO bed" why, doctor, that's ex-
actly what keeps me awake" How
can II possibly have that effect?" My
wife eats it, Chicago Tribune
Robson You look all broken up, old
man What's the matter? CraiG 4
called on Miss rruyns last night and
no sooner had entered the parlor than
her mother appeared and demanded TO
know my intentions. THAT must have
been rather embarrassing. Yes but
that was not the worst Just as the
old lady finished speaking. Miss Pruyn
shouted down the stairs, Mamma. mann
ma, he isn't the one London Tit
Bits
Scotsman the other day weAt
Londsn dentist with a toOthache The
dentist told him he would only get re-
lief by having it out Scot-Aion, then
| must hae gas While the dentist
was getting il ready the Scot began to
count his money The dentist said,
somewhat testify You need not pay
until IT'S out" The Scot replied Il
ken that, but ms yere ABBOTT to max me
unconscious / jist want TO see hoo
stan" Sporting Times.
The public spirited lady meets the
little boy on the street The Lady
Little hoy, haven't you any homer The
Little Boy Oh yes'm, I've got II home.
The Lady And loving parents? The
Little Boy Yes'm. The Lady Are
they bringing you up to be good aud
helpful citizen? The Little Boy
Yes'm. The Lady VIII you ask your
mother to come and hear talk on
when Does Mothers Duty to Her
Child BeginY' next Saturday after
noon? The Little Boy (explosiyeiy)
What's tn matter with you, ma, Don't
you know me? I'm your little boy -
Cleveland Plain Dealer