davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04

The poet Shelley tells an amusing
story Of the influence that language
hard 10 be understood" exercises on
the vulgar mind. Walking near Co
vent Garden, London. be accidentally
iostlcd against an IriSh navy. who.
being IN It quarrelsome mood, seemed
inclined to attack the poet A crowd
Of ragged sympathzers began to gath
or. when Shelley, calmly facing them.
deliberately pronounced
~ have put my hand into The ham
per. have looked on the sacred bar
ley. have eaten out Of the drum.
have drunk and am well pleased. I
have said Knox Ompax. and 1t Is On
ished"
The effect was magical The aston
ishcd freshman fell back. His friends
began to question him. what bar
ley Where's the hamper What
have you been drinkingT and Shelley
walked away unmoiested.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04
A Case of Hydrophobia.

w. II. Crane, the veteran comedian.
who was at the st. Francis while appear
ing in "She Stops to Conquer" was re-
lating an anecdote of his earlier days to
some friends.
Once" said Crane, the wrinkles deep
ening on his solemn countenance, when
l was playing IN Romeo and Juliet a
young fellow in the company playing a
small part in the first act was called
upon to use the ancient sign of contempt
that of swapping his thumb nail on his
front teeth.
WELL this young man had false teeth.
and one night they became loose. and
when he snapped his thumb nail they
few into the orchestra. While the audi
ence laughed a little, the little drummer
on the end got them and placed them in
his back pocket. The peoples mirth,
however, was turned to horror when the
drummer sat down. He jumped up
quickly, went into commissions and ex-
pired."
Crane paused and a friend asked:
What was the matterT'
well" drawled the comedian. without
a smile, ''the drummer sat down on the
teeth, they bit him, atd be died of by
San Francisco Chronicle.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04

When Farragut ran the gauntlet of
Forts Jackson and st. Philip, below New
Orleans, the little gunboat Cayuga
was everywhere in the thick OF the
fighting. A colored boy OF the crew
was passing powder when a spent
grape-shot struck n casting near him,
shattered and few In many directions.
One piece hit him on the thickeSt part
of his forehead. says the author Of "a
Sailor Of Fortune" and dropped to the
deck.
He picked It up nonchaIantly. put II
IN his pocket and kept at work.
When the fight was over and the
members OF the crew were Dragging.
this boy, who was not over fourteen.
stepped up to some Of them and pulled
the grape-shot from his pocket
You hush :" he said to the boosters.
Dat shot done hit me on de haid an
broke in two! Dere's de- shot and dere's
de- place 1t hit me- You can see fob
youse'f"
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04

There was cigar store opened up
tOwn the other night. and as the build
ing was not provided with steam heat
gas radiator was supplied. Three
hours later a huge plate mirror directly
behind was cracked from top to bottom
by the unequal expansion In a tight
frame
Bad luck 10 have mirror break"
commented customer as he stood at
the cigar lighter You'll have seven
years bad luck"
Il don't miud the glass breaking" the
cigar man explained to a friend. II
can pay for q new glass. and Im not
superstitIous. but I can't have the new
mirror for "A week, and meantime every
man who comes in here Is going to
tell me It's bad luck to have the glass
smashed Sure. it's bad luck. Don't
| have to stand here and pretend I'm
hearing that fool remark for the first
time? I'm liable to kill some one be-
fore the glass Is replaced I've heard
il at least fifty times SO far. ind this
is only the first DAY. "-C Chicago Inter
Ocean.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04

4 portrait has recently been obtained
Of the last man to fall in the Civil
War. He was n Union soldier John
jefferson Williams from Jay County.
Indiana, 4 member Of Company II Of
the Thlrty-fourth Indiana Regiment
The fight in which he was killed oc-
CURED at Palmetto Ranch, Texas on
May IL, 1865, more than month after
Lees surrender.
The word to lay down arms had not
reached Texas at that time, and an en-
gagenent took place between small
force Of Union troops and detach-
mont Of Confederate cavalry. williams
was the only man killed
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04
80 900 600 "Hellos,, a nau

There have been 16,47S,65S telephone
calls every day during the last year, ac-
cording to the annual report of the
American Telephone and Telegraph com
pany, which owns all the Bell telephones
in the United States. This takes no ac-
count of the independent telephone com
panies, which in some parts Of the coun-
try are now stronger than the so-called
monopoly. A round estimate gives 3D.
100000 day. The Bell exchanges give
800, 100000 connections during the
year, and nearly 100000 people said
Hello. Central" and other things 10 the
operators.-New York World
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04

been ascertained. No precise informal
ton on the subject has been discovered,
and not even a general statement can
be made of his casualties In few of
the battles of this campaign his losses
were greater than the losses suffered by
the Illinois troops; in the greater part
OF the battles they we're less. Our re-
Inducements had amounted to Just
about the same number as the losses.
1t WAS estimated from the best sources
of information that Lee had also re-
ceiyed achievements equal to his
losses, so that the armies were now
or about the same size as when the
campaign began.
All the achievements organized in
the North and reported as ON their
way to the front did not reach us.
There was a good deal of truth in the
remark reported to have been made by
Mr.. Lincoln I'VE get a large body of
reinforcements together, and start
them 10 the front but after deducting
the sick, the deserters. the ragglers,
and the discharged, the numbers seri-
ously diminish by the time they reach
their destination It's like trying to
shovel tleas across barnyard; you
don't get EN- all there"
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04

General Horace Porter, in his Cam
paigning with Grant" IN The Century.
carries the narrative through the Cold
Harbor campaign. General Porter says .
While at the mess-tahIe taking our last
meal before starting upon the march 10
the James Oh the evening of the 18TH
the conversation turned upon the losses
which had occurred and the reinforce
ments which had been received NJ to
that time. The fgures then known did
not differ much from those contained
In the accurate official reports after
ward complied From the opening Of
the campaign. May I to the movement
across tine James. June L. the total
casualties in the Army Of fhe Potomac.
including Sheridans cavalry and Burn
sides command lad been Killed, T.
G2i wounded. 2S.3:}g captured or miss
ing 1866; total. 5492G The services
Of all the men included IN these fig
ares were not. however, permanently
lost TO the army. A number Of them
were prisoners who were aftcrwaTd ex-
Changed, and many had been only
slightly wounded, and we're soon ready
for duty again. Some were doubtless
counted more than once, as soldier
who was wounded III a battle twice,
and afterward killed may have been
counted three times Ia making up the
list Of casualties. u whereas the army had
really lost bu; one man
The losses Of thc enemy haze never
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04
CHAPTER XVIII.

"Bebe," said Mr.. Langley, turning from
her cousin contemptuously and address
ing himself pointedly to the girl, ''your
father was a very poor man after his
quarrel with his family, and he left
precious little for you; but that was
because he had very little Of his own. and
he chose to draw nothing from the home
revenues. Your grandfather is an ex-
tremely wealthy man, however, and his
son would have been the same had he
succeeded him in the ordinary way. But
the property is left il rather a curious
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04
No Longer Worried.

Il thought" said the visitor, I'D drop
in and tell you what your hair resrorer
did for a friend of mine. When he
started using your elixir there were only
a few hairs on his head, but now it's
completely covered"
Indeed exclaimed the patent medi-
cine man.
Yes; by six feet Of earth The Cath
olic Standard and Times.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04
Europe,s Best rnfantrymen.

ANY one who has seen Swiss troops on
parade and on the march cannot fail to
be struck by the exceptionally fine ply
sique of the men. No country in Eu-
rope-perhaps none in the world-can
furnish material 50 Admiralty e ri--f,tesd
for the making Of the ideal foot solder.
Work
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04
After the Honermonn.

Mother Why are you weeping, my
dear.
Daughter Boo hoo George sent
me a peck Of kisses ia his letter
Mother-Then / don't see any cause
for tears.
Daughter-Ycs, he used to send
bushel and now believe that even the
peck is short weight. ~
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04

u shouldn't aim toe high with a
T. raCge gGu.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04

did your cook leave you without
any warning, Mrs Smlth?" Eyes, and
without any spoons, too."-Baltimore
American.
The Springfield herald., 1907-05-31

were afraid to try them. He now
come out with the remarkable state
ment that a conspiracy was entered
into between these cold-footed Colo
RADIO officials and the Idaho officials to
hang the men in Idaho.
"'When ! had charge OF the military
campaigns In this state continued the
general. my greatest trouble was in
keeping backbone in Peabody and in
few of the mine owners who signed
contract with me to wipe out the
Western Federation of Miners. The
mine owners agreed to appoint the ad-
jutant general. and to issue the order,
Destroy the Western Federation" l
accepted the position. and started out
to carry out the order. The Western
Federation of Miners was no Sunday
School class. by any means.
AS military man, | recognized
It as an enemy and treated it as>such.
l accordd to all of its members the
courtesy due common enemy. l cap
tured its commander and put him in
prison. i cut off their base of supplies
by closing the mines in which the
worltmen contributed to their support.
81 captured several men in the ranks
and escorting them to places of safety
in the rear OF the battle and kept them
there largely as prisoners. They nick
named this deportation. l called 1t
military necessity. In fact, acting on
the orders of the governor, l went
down the line against them. My orders
We're ito wipe them off the earth"
"In doing this, public opinion, of
course, went with the underdog and
the fellows who had promised to put
up the cash, and these shoulder
F-1I ,l,N Ia. 1nff
the militia demoralized. mighty soon
got cold feet. In fact was compelled
number of times to cut off all lines
OF communication in order to keep
from being bothered with them.
" During this war number OF
crimes were committed on the other
side. / arrested the men, put them in
jail and found regular indictments
agains, them. When 1t came to trial
there wasn't any of these people that
had the nerve to hold court TO try
them.
Whatever Meyer and Haywood did
out here, | don't believe they are guilty
of the Steunenberg affair. and l think
it's nothing more than right that they
should be given fair trial in the state
where they committed the crime. It's
certainly unfair to take them away out
on the desert in Idaho and hang them
for crime, committed in Colorado
1T would look as though the Off
cials here were afraid that some of
their own crookedness would come out
II an attempt was made to hold trial
here. You know there have been
charges of crimes on both sides, and
have said that | had as much trouble
watching one side as the other.
"I intend to watch the Idaho situa-
ton thoroughly, and if any of these
yello x-streaked individuals undertake
to swear that something happened that
didn't happen I'll go out here and tell
the straight of it
General Bell has been watching the
The Springfield herald., 1907-05-31
Another Texas Cyclone.

Fort Worth, Texas.-A tornado
which killed at least twelve persons
swept over Texas May 25th, destroy.
ing thousands of dollars worth of prop.
erty The full list of dead is not OBJ,
tainable. as telegraph wires are down
in many portions of the state. but it is
believed the death list will show a
great increase. Those who are known
to be dead are:
w. P. Lyon, an Ellis county farmer
Harry Sneed, aged sixteen, of Rose
bud.
A. r. Sanderson. Park Springs.
Walter Martin, Emory.
Mrs. Burkhalter, blind woman,
Emory.
William Harvey, Emory.
Three nebroes, names not yet
known, Emory.
Mrs r. C. Douglas. Wills Point.
Jesse Douglas, her eight-year-old
son.
James Mcclellan, seven years old.
Scores are reported injured, many of
them fatally.
Many cattle were killed, number
Of them being picked up by the tornado
and carried hundreds of feet.
At Emory every building on the
county poor farm was demolished and
it is feared number of the inmates
were killed.
In other parts of the state buildings
were torn from their foundations and
whirled through the air.
The Springfield herald., 1907-05-31
Appraises American Colleges.

Theodore Parker once said that DE
mocracy meant not I am as good as
you are but You are as good as
am"
That definition of democracy. in the
larger or general sense, is recalled by
the handsome compliment paid our
American universities by Prof. Brandt
of Berlin university. who has been CIV
ing his American impressions in a
German periodical. OF the colleges of
the new world the distinguished Ger
man scholar says: The students be-
have themselves with self-respect as
well as respect for others as if con-
scious of being members of great
and proud democracy. A remarkable
measure of Independence distinguishes
these youths whose instructors, in
deed, seem more anxious to educate
them as good citizens than as fine
gentlemen" If that be true. as we be-
lieve it is as rule, remarks the Mil
waukee Seminal, our growing multi
tude of college boys are collectively
imbued with the right spirit of democ-
racy, as defined by Parker. and their
teachers are recognizing in practice
that the teaching function must con-
cern itself mainly with molding char
acter in conformity with the theory
and ideals of this republic of manhood
valuation and civic equality.
The Springfield herald., 1907-05-31
ONCE THE PATH WAS SMOOTH.
Discard That Old Adase About the
Course of True Love.

A remarkable wedding has lately
taken place at Naples. remarkable be-
cause of the extreme youth and alert
ness of the happy couple. When Ce-
lestino Giordano, aged Is. with Gicelia
Nappi, his chosen bride. went to the
registry office to be married, the COM
missioner was very loath to perform
the ceremony, for the pair had not
reached the age limit prescribed by
the civil code. The young folks had
evidently expected to have to over
come difficulties to their union, for
while the commissioner was hesitat-
ing as to what he should do, they
sprang surprise on him and settled
the matter by producing royal de-
cree of dispensation, which they had
obtained direct from the king. This
being proved genuine the children
were Joined to wedlock in the pres.
ence of their parents and large gath.
ering of interested spectators.
The Springfield herald., 1907-05-31

Wealthy women. including. it is
said, some members of New York's
400, have established fad for black
walnut furniture and are poking about
through secondhand shops looking for
good pieces. 1t is only few years
since this furniture went out of fash
ion, and even at that time black wal
nut wood was growing scarce and
costly so that anyone with foresight
might have known that the bedsteads,
bureaus and tables that were discard
ed so gladly and for so little money
would in time increase in value. How
ever, those who practically gave this
furniture away in their anxiety to get
rid of it, says the indianapolis Star.
need not mourn fer. fashionable or
not, the fact remains that its effect
is gloomy and unless especial care is
taken to offset its dark and somber
look it is depressing to the spirits OF
those who must live with it.
The Springfield herald., 1907-05-31

the Little Snake valley this summer,
and at present Baggs and Lay are the
two principal supply points for towns
in the valley. Lay is almost straight
south of Baggs, on the surveyed line
of the Moffat road.
Baggs is the terminal point of
stage line and a proposed automobile
line running respectively from Raw
Inns, Wyoming, and Wamsutter, Wyom-
ing. on the Union Pacific. If it is de-
cided that Baggs is in Wyoming, 1t is
quite probable that another town will
be started Just over the line in Colo
RADIO, and that the new town will be-
come the metropolis of the valley For
this reason the citizens of Baggs are
getting up a petition which they will
send to Governor Buchtel and the
State Land Board. asking that the
matter be looked into ami Il report
made as to the real location of the
town.
There arc nearly 500 people living in
Baggs, and if they ought to be send
ing representatives to the Legislature
at Denver instead of Cheyenne, they
want to know it.
The Springfield herald., 1907-05-31
DR.. TALKS OF FOOD
Pres. of Board of Health.

What shall eat?" is the daily in
quiry the physician is met with. | dc
not hesitate to say that in my judg
ment, a large percentage of disease is
caused by poorly selected and improp
erly prepared food. My personal ex
perience with the fully-cooked food,
known as Grape-Nuts. enables me tc
speak freely of It's merits.
From overwork, suffered several
yea with malnutriton. palpitation of
the heart, and loss OF sleep. Last
summer l was led to experiment per
sonally with the new food, which
used in conjunction with good rich
cows milk. In short time after
commenced its use, the disagreeable
symptoms disappeared. my hearts ac
tion became steady and normal, the
functions of the stomach were proper
ly carried out and l again slept as
soundly and as well as in my youth. 4
Il look upon Grape-Nuts as pen
fect food, and no one can gainsay but
that 1t has most prominent place in
a rational. scientific system OF feeding.
Any one who uses this food will soon
be convinced of the soundness OF the
principle upon which 1t is manufac'
tured and may thereby know the facts
as to its true worth" Read. "The Road
to Wellville," In pkgs. There's
Reason"
The Springfield herald., 1907-05-31
WHICH STATE OWNS BAGGs?
Big Irrigation Project Raises Intricate
Question Between Colorado
and Wyomnq.

Is the town of Baggs in Wyoming or
Colorado? Baggs itself doesn't know
and if Baggs doesn't, who does? On
the map Baggs is in Wyoming, just
north of the Colorado-Wyoming state
line, where it forms the boundary be-
tween Carbon county. Wyoming. and
Routt county, Colorado, and that was
where it belonged when the states
were originally laid out a great many
years ago. A government survey made
more recently, however, ran the state
line north OF Baggs, it is said, thus
bringing il into Routt county, Colo
rado. Nobody paid any attention to
the last survey, because until recently
it made no particular difference
whether Baggs was in Colorado. Wyo-
ming or Alaska.
But all that is changed now. The
Little Snake River valley. which runs
southwest from Baggs, is the site for
one of the largest irrigation projects in
the state. The Routt County Develop
ment Company is building an irriga-
tion canal and reservoirs. ard la..L and
water rights are being sold at $3.50
an acre. Now. Baggs wants to be de-
clared in on this prosperity and 1t is
obvious that if the town isn't in Colo
RADIO another town will be built just
south of the line, where there will be
no doubt as to which state has juris-
diction over it. II is anticipated that
several thousand people will settle in
The Springfield herald., 1907-05-31
E. M. Johnson a Free Man.

Canon City, Colo-"Fidelity" E. NJ.
Johnson, convict No. 6433, whose pa
role was received by Warden Cleghorn
May %, left the penitentiary the same
day. DIR. B. /. johnson of Denver, a
brother of the convict, arrived at 3
o'clock in the morning and brought
with him suit case in which he car
ried suit of black cheviot. derby
hat, new shoes and underclothing. The
doctor reached the prison at O'Clock
and was permitted to interview his
brother in deputy warden's office.
The greeting was cordial and after a
short talk Fidelity" was taken to the
bath house. where he enjoyed plunge.
He then dressed in the clothing his
brother had brought and entered the
ccnvict barber shop. At 10:3 he was
taken to the chief clerks office, where
he subscribed to the conditions of the
parole and received his personal effects
and money which had been held by the
officials.
The Springfield herald., 1907-05-31
------777-
Waste OF Scientific Ihounht

Word comes from Paris that scien-
tist over there has an invention that
will make a detailed record of mans
thoughts. This is interesting, but it
will never be popular. declares Cleve
land Plain Dealer Few men think
thoughts that they would care to pre-
serve. more especially if taken una
wares by a prowler with snapshot
think recorder. OF course, it might
be possible to train the mind to sit
for a mental picture, as it were, but
there are few men who could look
pleasant while doing it. No man
would feel safe as long as he thought
1t was in the neighborhood. No, the
Frenchman would do humanity a
much greater and far more satisfying
service by perfecting a new can open
er or an original cough cure.
The Springfield herald., 1907-05-31
HWhiskers.n

"Whiskers" was a word formerly
used to designate the hair on the up
per lip. Scott more than once speaks
of "whiskers on the upper lip" and so
does Defoe in Robinson Crusoe.'
Johnson defined a 'whisker" as the
hair growing on the upper lip or cheek
unshaven; mustachio." 1t seems to
have taken its name from a fancied
resemblance to small brush, to
"whisk" properly meaning to sweep.
and "whisker' having been a par
ticular kind of feather brush-also. in
the slang of former time, switch
or rod. In the seventeenth century q
"whisker" signified among other
things brazen lie, a "whopper."
The Springfield herald., 1907-05-31
Gold Under the Wind River,

Shoshoni Wyo.-G. w. Sinks of this
place, Charles Franklin of Cripple
Creek, f. E. Shaffer of Deadwood and
u. r. Moses, connected with the Chi.
cago & Northwestern railroad, have To-
Gated number of placer claims on
the ancient bed of Wind river, four
miles from this place, and announce
the discovery of the richest placer ever
located in Wyoming
They have sunk hollow shafts to bed,
rock in the ancient course of the
stream and everywhere they have
gravel running from 81 to SO yard in
coarse gold, with additional values
throughout in -four gold The quartet
of discoverers have planned to run a
canal from the river to the ancient bed
and to operate large placer dredge.
The Springfield herald., 1907-05-31
ahoata Of Dead Iakea

In the great basin between the
Rockies and the Sierra Nevadas lie
the ghosts Of many dead lakes. Riv.
ers still flow down to the dry edge OF
these one-time great reservoirs and
are licked up by evaporation and the
chinook winds. OF all the lakes that
once lay there. only Great Salt Lake,
Lake Tahoe and Bear Lake are left.
The Southern Pacific rolls for 165
miles across the bed Of what was once
Lake Lahontan, and the passengers
gazing idly from the windows may see
the terraces and wrinkles in the crust
of the fossil lake which nature robbed
and defrauded of its crystal treasures
ages ago.-Exchange.