davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1907-01-24
GLOBE slGHTs.
Prom tho Antchlson Globe.

Even n heroine would look very well
after washing her head.
As one grows older. moonlight and
popcorn gradually yield precedence To
more substantial Joys.
A man with lot OF money may not
he very popular. but he Ii n big help
To the community.
II man has no ability. and no IN.
duAtry no amount or goodness viii
make him n successful man.
Women who claim they can marry
any man they want TO. occasionally
exhibit mighty poor Judgment.
You will not hear much more OF our
friend. the turkey. until the summer
rains begin TO drown the young.
Blowing n cornet In good exercise for
developing the lungs. but there In nj
ways danger that IL Will develop u
feud.
A dog that gets new collar with o.
holly ribbon attachment Is not usually
one OF the useful members OF his
breed.
There In one kind OF economy that IL
never practiced on the farm: A saving
OF kerosene these dark winter morn
ings.
What n preacher designates an ..
'call." would be termed n raise" By
followers OF the favorite American.
card game.
A boy who In properly raised In about
as much shocked az any one who hears
him. when he uses his first swear.
word.
IL II possible to be 30 truthful thar
with every additional gem you get In
your crown Up There. you lose a friend
on earth.
AS a general rule. wherever you find
n sensitive child" investigation will
reveal the fact that Il has an indulgent
mother.
When a man tells his wife she will
have to cut down expenses. she thinks
and thinks. and then decides u will
have To be on cigars.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1907-01-24

MOST UNGENTLEMANIY.


AS we neared the upper end OF the
park. told my chauffeur. through the
tube, TO enter and 40 slowly. When
ever a lamp flashed IN at us, I had n
glimpse OF her progress toward COM
posure-now she was drying her eyes
with the bit OF lace she called n hand
kerchief. now her bare arms were up,
and with graceful fingers she was ar
ranging her hair: now she was straight
and Etill. the soft. fiuffy material with
which her wrap was edged drawn close
about her throat. I shifted To the OPP
posite seat. for my nerves warned me
that l could not long control myself.
II l stayed on where her garments
were touching me.
I looked away from her for the
pleasure az looking at her again, OF
realizing that my overwrought senses
were not cheating me. Yes. there she
was. ga all the luster OF that magnetic
beauty l cannot think OF even now
without an upblazing OF the fire which
Is TO the heart what the sun Is To n
blind man dreaming OF sight. There
she was on my side OF the chasm that
had separated us-Rlone with me
minc-mine! Aud my heart dilated
with pride. But n moment later came
a sense OF humility. Her beauty in
toxiCatcd me. but her youth, her fine
ness. so fragile for such rough hands
as mine. awcd and humbled me.
Il must be very gentle" said I 20
myself Il have promised that she
shall never regret. God help me TO
keep my promise! She Is mine. but
only TO preserve and protect"
And that idea OF responsibility In
possession was new To me-was TO have
far-rcaching consequences. Now that
think OF Il. I believe IL changed tho
whole course OF my life.
She was leaning forward. her elbow
on the easement or the open window OF
the brougham. her cheek against her
hand; the moonlight was glistening on
her round. Arm forearm and on her
serious face. How far. far away from
everything IL seems here!" sho said.
her voice tuned 10 that soft, clear light.
and how beautiful IL Isl" Then, ad-
dressing the moon and the shadows OF
the trees rather than me: II wish
could go on and on-and never return
to--to the world"
Il wish We could" said l.
My tone was low. but she started.
drew back into the brougham. became
an outline In the deep shadow. II an
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1907-01-24

perInE cxcitcdly m her ear.
Listen" he said again. My vito 10
coming TO you this afternoon 20 have her
fortune told. and II you want TO make
some money on the side
lie laid n bank note on the stuffed owls
head.
Tell her on no account 10 buy a motor
car. because you read In her palm that she
~ doomed TO be killed In an automobile ac-
c.dcnt"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1907-01-24
A Bigger Place.
From Evcrybody's.

from f.NcTNboly N.
There n no end TO the stories told on
William r. Trayers, who extracted more
humor than discomfort from his stutter-
ing. A friend who had known him In hal
timore said 10 him:
Billy, Il seems TO me that you SHUTTER
moro now than wncn you lived In Balu-
more"
"w-w-well. N-n-pew York's a b-b-big-
ger place" returned Traycrs thoughtfully.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1907-01-24
THE SOCIAL HOUR.
A Good Reason.

A husband was being arraigned In court
In a suit brought by his wife for cruelty.
II understand, sir" said the Judge. ad-
dressing the husband. that one OF tho In
digni,ies you have showered upon your
wife In that you have not spoken TO her
for three years. Is that soT'
1T Il. your honor" quickly answered
the husband.
well, air." Numbered the judge. why
didn't you speak 10 her. may ] ask7''
simply" replied the husband, because
I didn't want To interrupt her"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1907-01-24

II is almost impossible 10 grow n
nice crop OF potatoes or get n good
quality OF apples without spraying. To
the proper time and an the right way.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1907-01-24
Enouah Hard Luck.

Iancla, the noted Italian automoblllst,
was asked the other day by a reporter II
he did not think motor racing too dan
gcrous
"Dangerous-yea." n. Lancia, replied.
TOO dangerous-no. For nothing that
benefits mankind--and automobiles benefit
mankind inexpresalbly--is too dangerous
for n man TO undertake..
II have n good deal OF contempt for men
who are not brave to the point OF RASH
ness. I am like q highwayman who held
up n gasoline runabout on the outskirts OF
Rome.
This highwayman stopped the runabout
with a shot IN tho air. Then he ran forth
from the 10 nb that had concealed him
tho holdup happened on tho AppIan Way
land found. TO sis s'E Prise. only q wom-
an I'm the little car.
where. madam. In your husbandr he
demanded. steruty and susplciously.
He's under the seat she answered.
flushing.
Then said the highwayman, I WON'T
take nothing. It's bad enough to have Q
husband like that. without being robbie
into the bargain"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1907-01-24
-
WE'LL!

Miss Anna Held speaks excellent Eng
Iish, with but the merest trace OF a French
accent.
A dramatic editor complimented her on
this head the other day. and she replied:
'-Oh, yes, / would rather not speak Rt
all than not speak correctly. They are no
ludIcrouS, don't you think, tho incorrect
spcakers7
IT remember once. In Nice. an English
man and n Frenchman wero about 70 sep
arate on the Promenade des Anglais.
'"Ths Engilshman. rs he started toward
the Cerclo Mcditerranee. called back:
Eau reservoir
And the Frenchman waved his hand
and answered:
'TankS!'"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1907-01-24
Bia Savina.

Listen" said the man OF middle age.
Ia Vas bending over the paInist. whis
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1907-01-24
Thn Main Thlna,

At literary club In Boston one night,
there was an encounter between Bos-
tonian, protesting a love OF art for arts
sake, and r. Marion Crawford the novel
ist.
In a slightly patronizing manner the
Boston man asked:
Have you ever Rspired 90 write any
thing. Mr. Crawford. that will live after
you are gomez
My dear air." replied Crawford. with
a broad smile. my principal effort just
now II TO write something that will en-
able me TO live while I am here"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1907-01-24
Precautions For. No. Against.

Lieut.. Frank Lahfn. VINO u now inc
worlds champion balloonist, said an
aeronRut In New York. lis n young man
with n muscular figure and a resoluto face.
He II remarkable In aeronautics for his
skill and his prudence.
81 once heard an inventor describing 70
him a rather poor invention In the way
OF n safety anchor.
~ safety anchor, chr said I.ahm.
Well. with that anchor should DO about
as frightened AZ tho old lady In the sky
scraper hotel
ION being assigned TO a room on tho
.nlnteenth floor. she asked the bell hop ner.
'vously n the proprietor had taken any
precautions against fire.
Yes, MAN. said the bell hop: he has.
Tho place IL insured for three times its
real value
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1907-01-24
compIied With the Ruler.

A prominent physician. whose speciality
was physical diagnosis. required his pa
tients. before entering his private consul
tation room. 20 divest themselves
OF all supcrfiuous clothing In order TO save
time one day n man presented himself
without having compiled with this re-
quircment
why do you como I'm here without
complying with my rules demanded tho
doctor. Just step into that side room
and remove your clothing and then I'll see
you. Next patient. please.'
Tho man did as requested and after n
time presented himself In regular order
duly Invested OF his clothing.
Now" said the doctor. what can do
for YOU
~ just called" replied the man. ito col
iect that tailoring bin which you owe US. -
-
Picking Up a Living.
Captain Spencer or tho Salvation army
asked oockncy convict what he dia for
"A living when he left prison. well. in
spring does biz o. pea picking and In
the autumn ] does n bit o. 'op picking. F"
Yes" said the captain. "and what do
you do In the winter" Well. mister. I
may rs well be honest with yer. In the
winter I does a bit o. pocket picking. 7"
Captain Spencer next asked: And what
happens them The convict replied:
"why,'I comes ere 20 prison and does q
bit o oakum picking"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1907-01-24
HsmIet Indeed NJ ad.

Richard Mansfield contribute an anec-
dots TO the old question OF the sanity OF
Hamlet, says tho Chicago Chronicle.
"Ono morning in the west" he said. IT
met a young friend and asked him where
no had been the night before
~ went my young friend replied. TO
sec So-and-so'H Hamlet
, AHA, did you? said ]. Now. tell mo
do you think Hamlet was mad?'
~ certainly do replied no. There
wasn't 500 In the house. "
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1907-01-24
Revenae!

One OF the leading tenors in Moscow
was called upon to sing an opera In which
ono note was much too high for him, but
he got n man In the orchestra 20 come In
just at the right time and supply the note.
In exchange the tenor was TO take him to
supper. Tho plan answered well. the APP
plause was loud. but the tenor forgot all
about the supper. Next time no sang the
opera he went To the front OF the stage,
put his hand on his heart, and opened his
mouth as wide as he could. His discom-
fiturs was great when the expectant hush
was broken by voice from the orchestrs
saying. where's my SUPPER
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1907-01-10
and Anglo.Saxon purity, but is
no fool Democrat.

and Anglo, Saxon purity, but is
no fool Democrat.
Cotton can't be grown except
an Southern soil and all expert
ments had failed to compete
with US.
Mr. Smith spoke for more than
an hour and his speech abound
ed in humor, eloquence, pathos
and lot of practical argument
There were present several
hun lred representative farmers
and business men and the high.
est tribute to the gifted speak
er's oratory was the fact that ne
held them patiently all through
the dinner hour.
A collection was taken up for
the Association and the receipts,
all told amounted to about $50.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1907-01-10
The Domestic Problem.

81 once lost an Irish servant" re-
marked q German lady who was re-
hting the trouble she had in keep
ing domestics, because | could not
convince her that mick is Ger
man name for a fly. One day my
little baby daughter was seated in
chair near a window which open
ed on the piazza, where Bridget was
at work. The window was closed,
and a number of flies were busy
humping their heads against the
panes in an endeavor to escape to
the outside. They attracted baby's
attention, who called out to me to
look at them, at the same time say.
ing, Mick, mick, mick Just then
Bridget turned to speak to the baby
and heard these words. And even
today Bridget is firmly convinced
that 1 instructed the baby to make
fun of her. York Eerald.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1907-01-10
New York's oldest Street.

One of the strangest streets in
New York is Patchen alley, situated
about at the entrance OF Green
wich village. The alley is conduct
ed upon the principle of a building
of fats. There ere two rows Of lit
tie three. story houses, the height OF
two story houses Of ordinary size.
There are small balconies outside
each row of windows, and these are
vine clad. If you ring the bell and
ask for the janitor you will be told
that he lives in the middle house on
the north side, and in the meantime
you will be having glimpse into
the narrowest hallway in New York
out into about the smallest and
ereenest back yard. Patchen alley
is as it was some hundred years ago.
There have been no changes.-New
York Press.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1907-01-10
An Early Spelling Rsformer.

An English paper calls attention
to an early spelling reformer. OF
Milford, the historian of Greece,
Macaulay wrote, milford piques
himself on spelling better than any
Of his neighbors, and this is not
only in ancient names, which he
mangles in defiance both of custom
and reason, but in the most Or
dinary words Of the English Ian
guage." In Aitford's history the
following 'mangled" words may be
found: Controul, study, lsbored,
labor, endeavored, literature, ma-
roding land, pronunciation, favor,
spred, forish, etc. "Why don't you
spell your name fielding as you1
family does, not Felding?" said
Lord Denbigh to his relative, the
author Of "Tom Jones'" The an
swer was triumphant: "For the very
coed reason that / am the first Of
the family that could spellw
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1907-01-10
Manner Of Leaf Fall.

The manner in which the leaf
fall proceeds in different trees is
noteworthy. The ends Of the
branches lose their leaves frat in
the ash, beech and hornbeam, when
the body of the tree is still clothed
with bright foliage. The poplars
and willows have an exactly contra
ry habit, for when the trunk is
stripped Of foliage the branch ends
are still decorated with few lone
leaves which wave like ragged ban
ners beneath the November sky. 1t
is remarkable how tenaciously these
last leaves cling to the tossing
boughs. At last they also come
hurting to the frozen ground, and
the :, bare trees Of tie forest give
forth once more, under the strong
winds urging, that stern, sonorous
music which will last throughout
the winter.-St. Nicholas.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1907-01-10
Remark Betrayed Him.

He sat in the smoking compart-
ment OF the parlor car complacently
putting a perfecto. His easy man.
ner and his polished language pro-
claimed him to be a man Of the
world.
"Of one thing l an certain" he
said, "and that is that l understand
women thoroughly and completely"
His fellow passengers looked at
each other uneasily and made vari-
Gus excuses to leave the compart-
ment.
Two keepers boarded the train at
the next station and took the soli-
tary smoker into custody. He had
escaped from an insane asylum that
morning.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1907-01-10
BEES LAXATIVE HONEY AID tar
RELskxEs COUGHS AKo COLDS
DR. !VDsoH PARALYzED.
FuFmal URiVefsib's Grand Old Han
Sefi0uSly iii.


GREENvILLE, January 8:-Dr
Charles Hallette Judson, Fur
man University's grand old
man, who has for IS years been
intimately connected with the
University, lies in a critical con-
dition tonight, as a result OF a
stroke of paralysis, which oc:
Cured Monday at noon. His
left side is partially paralyzed,
also his throat. The attending
physicians late tonight say that
his stroke is the beginning of
the final dissolution. They give
out no hope whatever for any
permanent improvement at his
advanced age. His 81 years are
against him for temporary i'm
provement. DR. Judson was
elected only a few days ago a
beneficiary of 1.-THE Carnegie
foundation fund. His annuity
is 200.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1907-01-10
AZ Of Pleasing.

A woman cannot charm because
she wants to. A man is not agree
able because he sets out to be. The
proper effect must, Like repartee, be
spontaneous and unprecedented
It must be radisted naturally, like
light and love. Books there sre
that pretend to tell how it is done.
They do SO quite as completely a.
grasshoppers teach entomology. The
ability to charm, to be agreeable, to
entertain perfectly and to be per-
fectly entertaining is an art appre-
hensible only through influences
generally prenatal, but always pro-
longed. The mere technique is SO
volatile that it must be inhaled.
Like the Mayfair intonation, little
by little, it must be absorbed, says
Edgar Saltus in the Delineator.
Kings and thugs may abash the
amateur in the art Of teasing, but
the artist is at home with them.
He puts himself in harmony with
them. In the ability to do that is
the whole secret Of the art Of pleas
ing.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1907-01-10
Mlona Eds" Outfit.

When it was noised about Sey-
mouth that 'Long Ed" Ames was
going to marry Cora Black one OF
the summer residents thought to
have some fun with him.
care you going to get married,
Ed?"
"That's what Cora says"
"Well, l suppose yuu've made all
the preparaticns-got your trous-
seau ready"
"Long Ed" did not balk at the
unusual word, as was expected.
"Yep," he returned; GIANT Lize
she bound my Sunday coat and put
a new collar ont, and I've had my
shoes tapped. youths Compan-
ion.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1907-01-10
THE SMALL TOWN.
Wherein Il Has the Advantage Over
the Larger City.


Small towns have their draw
backs. No man need try in these
yicilant little centers to lead dou-
ble life. There are faithful, sleep
less watchers at each end of the
line, with several sentinels along
the way, to report on his doings, his
failures to do and his misdoings.
Everything else failing, his very
thoughts are searched. The faith
full vedettes conclude from his
smallest movement or lack of move
ment what must he have in every
circumstance meant. On his return
home after every absence his
friends and neighbors cross exam
inc him as to every detail. he had
better tell the truth, because some
one will in due course turn up to
point out the inaccuracies in a
faulty narrative. In large cities
very few, if indeed any, of your
neighbors will worry much or at
length about your ineomings or out
goings. Few if any outside your
own immediate circle Of home and
business life care for your doings
while away. They are all too busy
too many people moving back and
forward to be kept track Of.
The small town has not, It is
true, the sanitariums and the pro-
fessional nurses of city life nor the
freedom of the latter from neigh
borly vigilance, but it has the big
city beaten to a whisper when it
comes to the food supply. If Brown,
the butcher, for instance, were to
kill Smiths lump jawed COW or
Green's black leg bull or Johnson's
steer that had been a-failin' ever
since spring, or did he refuse to
keep his shop neat and clean, every
one in town would be notified Of his
misdeeds and negligences and his
business soon come to standstill.
He might as well, in fact, quit the
town, for the dark deeds Of which
he had been guilty would be recited
week in and week out as regularly
as the psalms of David. With each
succeeding season his criminality
would assume increasing blackness.
Louisville Herald.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1907-01-10
Resolutions Of Respect.
Salters Station, S G.
40 1nno
November 1S, /

Resolutions adopted by the
Sunday.school of Union Presby-
terian church.
I Whereas, Almighty God has
by the hand of death taken away
a most truly beloved member of
our school, Miss Annie E Rog-
ers, be it therefore resolved:
/. That while confessing to a
deep feeling of individual loss,
We bow submissively to.the mys.
terious decree of Him, whose
will we believe is always wise
and good.
2. That We :bear witness to
our departed sisters faithful
attendance on the exercises of
our Sunday.school, and to her
constant good cheer and help.
fulness.
8. That we extend to the
members of the family, so sore
ly afflicted by her death, our
sincerest sympathy in this ir-
reparable loss, both theirs and
ours.
4. That a copy of these reso.
lutions be forwarded to her
family; also that I page in our
Sunday-school minutes be in.
scribed to her memory, and that
a copy be sent to the COUNTY
RECORD and the Christian Oh.
server for publication.
WALTER r BRYAN,
Sec'ty Union Sunday-schoo d.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1907-01-10
First DaHeoa Ascent.

The first public ascent By the
Montgolaer balloon was made June
5, 1888. It was q spherical bag,
consisting Of pieces Of linen but
toned together, suspended from
cross poles. A fire was hndled un-
der it, and the flames were fed With
bundles Of chopped straw. The
loose bag filed out, assumed Q
graceful form and IN short time
was completely distsnded At CIV
en- signal the stays were sGpped,
and tie balloon instantly ascended.
It's velocity accelerated until It
reached some height, them became
uniform and carried 1t 10 IN elsvsr
ton Of more than Q mile. For ten
minutes it remained suspended then
fell gently in 9 vineyard nearly two
miles distant from the place Of It's
ascension. The first adventures
to make an ascent In q balloon were
N. Piiatre de- Rozier and the Mar
quis IArlandes. In the basket Of
. balloon they on Nov. g., 1888,
rose to q height Of about 5000 feet.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1907-01-10
A Lesson In Etiquette.

Priscilla had, unknown to her
mother, paid a visit to one of her
small friends, and on her return
Mrs. Parsons was disturbed to note
the soiled dress her child wore.
priscilla, do you see that big
spot? What do you suppose Mrs.
Blakeslce thought Of such dirty
dress?" she asked.
II don't know" was Priscilla's
prompt reply. eff Mrs. Blakeslee
saw it she was too polite to mention
il" "-Harpsrs Weekly. "a
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1907-01-10
nCannibalism."

The word "cannibalism" is real
ly the name of a people. 1t is iden-
tical with Carib, many of the Ca
ribs, who formerly flourished in the
West Indies, having been consum.
ers Of human flesh. The letters 81"
IN" and ''r" are interchangeable in
certain aboriginal American Ian
guages, so that Columbus found one
West Indian island saying "Can-
iba," where another said "Carlb, "
while Shakespeare's Caliban is an
other variety of the same.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1907-01-10
EataIism With a Spring.

Two men were passing under a
skvscraper in process OF construc-
ton. Derricks a hundred feet
above hung over the street. They
were hosting great iron beams from
the sidewalk. All in all the building
was study in sudden death. One
of the men remarked that he felt
very ticklish in walking under such
places and that as a rule he avoided
them to the extent of going a block
out of the way. 'They never feaze
me-" said his companion. Pm a
fatalist. p A, shout came from
the foreman at the curb, and the
speaker simply by sort of reflex
action leaped forward and. scooted
for safety. The friend followed
him, muttering something about ia.
talism-with a spring in it.-New
York Post. -