The Washington herald., 1907-03-31


Kitty glancing up at me anxiously.
"Oh, IL shouldn't say thai" I replied,
deprecadngIy. as I noted her stin sailor
hat. common-sense boots, and plain little
tailored frock.
"of course you shouldn't say It., re-
Joined Kitty with touch Of disappoint-
ment in her voice, but you think It,
don't you?"
We'll" / agreed, comprOmisingly, you
do look rsther-rather different. There
isn't any powder on your nose. nor any
rustic to your skirts nor a single kink In
your pompadour; and you don't smell OF
violets. nor seem quite happy, but-there
it is" I exclaimed. suddenly.
There what is2" asked Kitty. with a
smile Of satisfaction.
Your dimple." ! explained.
"Oh. that" said Kitty. rubbing her Of
Tending cheek with a little frown. I wish
could leave that OF. too she added
with a sigh
What on earth have you been dotng?"
I demanded.
1T isn't what I've been doing" quoth
Kitty. promptly. but what I'm going to
NN ~f+N~t @-+fNA ~ AAAN -aA1+AtIAr III HtsiAA 10
call on my mother-in-law. Alr. Curtis, d"
she added. turning solemnly upon me.
'Your-What2"
"A woman who owns a son" explained
Kitty.
But her son isn't your" I began.
quickly
NO. he isn't mine" responded Kitty.
frankly, and he never viii be. But she's
q 'mother-in-law' in the most narrowing
sense Of the word. Every mother Of every
son is a 'mother-in-law' to every girl
who-who-"
Who looks at him?" / suggested.
Whom he looks at" corrected kitty.
She's the mother-in-law before taking
and, Ike medicine, before taking she's
much worse than after you've swallowed
the dose and gotten 1t down. Did you ever
see man so depraved, and hOmely, and
unattracuye, and uninteresting that his
mother didn't fancy that every woman
he met wanted to marry him. and didn't
hate her for il. instead 0f-of thanking
her?' And Kitty severely pushed back
an obstreperous curl that crept from
under her sailor hat and hung down over
one ear. It's the mothers Of men" she
went on, walking rapidly. who prevent
all the happy marriages and make all
the stupid, grouchy old bachelors, and are
al tie bottom OF all the silly runaway
matches and of most of the matrimonial
misery in this world!' and Kitty's heels
clicked angrily as she hurried down the
avenue
You, remarked, lifting my eyebrows
accuslngiy. seem to have had an unusual
amount of experience for"
Ne" interrupted Kitty. jinEling her
chateiaine impatiently, "oniY the usual
amount-the amount that every girl has
who hasn't hump or a sqdint And the
more charming and popular and eligible
a girl IS the more agonizing her experience
and the more desperately she is fought
and frozen and snubbed by the embryo
mothers-in-law. It's a battle to the knife
for really fascinating woman to get a
husband in these days" and Kitty sighed
mournfully.
"Oh. WELL" I remarked cheerfuliy.
we've got TO be protected some way. It's
the natural provision Of Providence
Providence didn't give woman son,
retorted Kitty, 'as it gave her a nose or a
fnger-to be attached TO her through life.
But she invariably thinks it did And she
looks upon every fairly attractive girl as a
thief or a bird Of prey. ready TO pounee
upon her treasure Every time / meet
the mother Of an unmarried man feel as
IL I were on trial for my life. and it makes
me so self-conscious and rebellious. that it
simply drives me toto DO things"
Kitty Glenn" l exclaimed. reproach-
fully. ITO do what things2"
Well" said Kitty, twisting her chate-
laine and looking the other way, "to sit in
the conservatory longer than I should and
TO say things I shouldn't and don't mean
and-and. oh, you know how wrongfuly
convicted criminal feels"
I can't say I do remarked. coldly.
''He feels" said Kitty, as if he might
just as well eat the cake he is accused Of
stealing"
"Oh," I exclaimed. "Then that is why
when my mother is aroused you are al
ways So"
I'm not!' cried Kitty. reddening.
So"
Don't you dare say 1t. Mr.. Curtis"
so particularly fascinating" l finished.
"Ah, well! There's something on the
mother-ln-law SIDE after all"
There's nothing on her side" retorted
Kitty, defiantly, ''but pure unadulterated
selhshness. II isn't her love for her son
that prompts her TO keep him away from
the girl he wants. It's her love for herself
and the fear that some other woman win
profit by her handiwork. She forgets that
she herself profited by another womsn's
handiwork when she married her husband.
She forgets all that she endured at the
hands of that other woman before she got
that husband. She foTgets thar her son is
human and that his happiness is at stake.
and"
Not at alIr' I objected That's Just
what she remembers; that he is human
too Humankind that his happiness de-
pends upon finding the right girl. and
There isn't any right girif' declared
kitty
what"
"Not in the eyes OF a mans mother.
Cleopatra herself wouldn't be beautiful
enough, nor the Queen of Sheba rich
enough, nor St Cecilia good enough
for the meanest, smallest, most miserable
specimen Of manhood mother ever
cherished. His name might be Smith,
and his income $40 a week. his chief
feature a hump and his only talent a
talent for amusing himself but you
couldn't convince his mother that any