The farmer and mechanic. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 18??-19??, 1907-09-03

Of the anecdote- Il happened in Rich
mond. 4 visiting Engltshman. who
bears a surname noted in Virginia an
nails. was taken home II dlnncT by a
Nirginian OF the same name II hap
pened that the servants OF the house.
the cook and waitress, at lesast. were
away Tor the day. but no virginia
hostess ever let's n thing like that IN
tcrfere with hospitality Tho family
nurse volunteered to cook the dinner
and Uncle George. an aged coloret
man. who did a little OF everything
and a good deal OF nothing about the
place, eagerly offered to wait on the
table He was sure he could do IL.
The sopp came IN in ar ancient silver
tureen. bearing the family coat-of-
arms, and the English guest was eS-
cited into v~olubility. The turecn was
mate to n treasured among the
heirlooms in his own family. and he
was delighted beyond words 10 see IT,
The tureen was a IN away. and ar
ter a heightened pause. In came
Uncle George proudly bearing two
roast ducks tucked neatly into the
same tureen. The hostess concealed
her disnay and the host dived into
the tureen in an enor 10 carve the
ducks 1t was quite a useless attempt.
and Uncie George was ordered to
bring a platter
ooh, Uncle GEORGE Uncle George!r
the hostess walled. after the guest had
departed. What on earth made you
bring the ducks on in The sour
tureen ?"
Uncle George was not a h dis
turbed.
why. Miss Betty he said. THAT
English gentleman, he certainly was
pleased with that tureen. His YES
just naturally popped when he dome
seen it. l thought he'd be glad TO
have another look at it."
My friend, Mrs. Blank, has a cook
who is one OF the most elegant per
sonages it has ever been my good
fortune to meet A spade is never Il
spade with her. She never refers To
such an article II she can help II. but
if she were obliged to mention IT
she'd call it an invention for the dis
of the fixed arrangement OF
a section of earth. One day last
week her mistress went into the kitch-
en- and opened the door of the fee
box.
MY goodness, Jane" she said.
What in the world is the matter with
this ice box? Isn't this fish spoiled? 2"
Il 'spects it is" said Jane. 1T GER
tainly do have a mighty unsightly
scent"
IT'S odd how the old. old idea OF
~placating an angry Deity persists"
ays a woman / know. "When any
thing dreadful enough to Brighten us
s1CObtA AA, Bty 81
we go ~plunging back to the be-
liefs that held mankind when the
world was young. When / Was at the
last month. | went to bed
one night arguing with myself as to
whether I'd write my milliner to send
a new hat. | didn't need il. and
buying it would be a foolish extrava-
gance, but / wanted it desperately and
l went to sleep I'd decided to
defy my conscience and SEND for II.
"A bout s O'Clock was rOuSed by |
shouting in the street. and | ran to
the window to see flames bursting
from a window of a hotel down the
street 1t was a second-story indow
and as / looked on / saw a frantic
woman run to a window on the floor
above. and lean out as If she meant
to jump. People shouted to her to
stay where she was-the fire was a
small one-5omebody'd come TO SHOW
her the way out if shed only wait
she wasn't in any danger. Still she
eaned cut, too frightened to pay at
t~entfon, and l was so afraid she'd
Jump that well, with all my phil
osophy, and my new thought and all
rest of it. Just pumped down on
knees and began to bargain with
Providence like q savage.
Don't let her jump" / begged.
Don't let her jump! | won't buv that
if you'll only keep her from Jump
ng. III give every cent Of tie money
Q the missionary society If you only
let her Jump"
Ny sister told me ~afterward that
simply shouted it out. | reckon did
or l felt that my wicked ~extrava-
about that hat was in some
way to blame for the woman's danger.
Z / gave up the hat I'd save her
somebody pulled her away from the
*lndoW and the fire was put out:
out do YOU know. / simply didn't dare
)rder that hat? / SUPPOSE II was silly
uperstlilon, but | didn't dare GO back
IN my word"