The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-06-02
BY F. P. dunno

an says there's nawthin' in it. It's hard on tn
boys. They ar-re dom TIL best they can. Ye
can't expect an author to lave his comfortable
flat an 20 three or four thousand miles to
larn whether tn hayro iv his little love story
,nurdhers his uncle be btin' him abaft tn ear
or be fellin' him with half Nelson an ham
mer-lock. Why should he? Who wud feed tn
goold fish while he was gone? No, sir, he does
Just right. Instead iv vcnturn' into TIL wilds
an p'raps ben' ct up be wan iv his fav'ritc
charackters he calls f'r some tea an toast, jabs
his pen into tn inkwell, an writes Victhry
was not long in tn grasp iv tn whale. Befure
he cud rayturn to his burrow Tusly Bcuspid
had seized him be tn tail an dashed his brains
out agin rock With leap in tn air th'
bold wolf put to rout covey iv muskrats,
those evil sojers iv fortune that ar-re seen hov-
rim over iyry animile battlefield. Wan blow
iv his paw broke tn back iv tn buffalo.
With another he crushed a monsthrous sage hen,
at wanst tn most threacherous an tn hardest
iy th' beasts iv tn wild. Parayzed be tn bold
ness iv tn wolf, tn camel an tn aux fled firm
TIL scene iv havoc, as is their wont. All that
remained lv his inimies now was tn COW, which
defied him firm the branches iv pine tree
an pelted him with tn monsthrous fruit iv
this cillybrated VEGETABLE. Now, it is well known
that however even they may be in boording
house, tn wolf is no match f'r COW in tree.
But this was no ordinary wolf. AS he heerd
tn low cry iv his mate he was indowed with
tn strength iv thousand piany movers. With
gesture Nv Impotence he shed his coat, f'r it
was Spring, childher, an he shud've been more
careful; he she'd his coat, swiftly climbed tn
tree an boldly advanced on tn foe His inimy
give tn low growl iv his hated thribe. How
NANNY time have heerd it in Englewood an
shuddered with fear But th' dauntless Tusky
answered back with his battle song, tn long
chirp iv tn wild wolf, his wife Accompanying
him firm TIL foot iv tn tree on sheep bone
With wan spring tn intrepid wolf sprang at
his inimy She thried to sink her venomous
fangs into his wish-bone, but with ncredulous
swiftness he back-heeed an upper-cut her,
swung left to body an right to point iv jaw, an
with wan last grimace iv defiance tn great
bulk iv tn monsther fell tin thousand feet into
tn roarin' torrent an took tn count. Tusky
herd TIL soft love-note iv his mate. She was
eatin' tn whale. He hastily DESCENDED. An SO
peace come to tn jungle
That sounds all right to me. I like to see
tn best man or tn best animile win. An l
want to see him win good 1t wudden't help
me story to tell about Tusky goin' home with
wan ear gone an his eye BACKED, an tellin' his
wife that he'd just about managed to put wan
over that stopped another wolf. That's what
usually happens up this way, an it amt very
good readin'. When I want to tell story
ihatll inthrcst me frinds 1 give it to thin
good. Whin describe me fav'rite hayro, Dock
Faggerty, tell about him THROWN wan man
out iv tn window an rsin' another as club to
bate tn remanin' twelve into submission. But
if had to swear to it, an wasn't on good Germs
with tn Judge, wudden't say that liver see
Dock Haggerty lick more thin wan lman-at
time. at time, mind We. He might take
care " procession " Jeffreys But he'd be in
throuble with couple iv Numbers iy tn Ethical
Culture Society that came to him at tn same
moment. If iver more thin wan comes at
wanst,' says TIL Dock, I'm licked, he says.
" But that amt what tell late at night, an
it amt what want to read. Ye bet it amt.
Ii ! whit over to book store an blew in me
good thirty-nine cints fr a dollar-an' -a-half
book, I'd want some kind iv hayro that
never see around these corners. TIL best day
liver knew Jawn L. Sullivan had little some-
thing on me. I won't say it was much, but
now that we're both retired, I'll say that Pm
glad I niyer challenged him. But I wudden't
lcok at book, an I wudden't anyway, but