The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1907-09-23
(Los Angeles Herald.l

cdpIlNlIy-tne men Win WnOm the
world laughs daily-gathered around
the banquet table in the Alexandria
hotel last night and told stories. That
was about all they did-tell stories
but the world at large missed about ten
thousand dollars worth of humor for
every man knew he was in the COM
pany of his peers and tried to surpass
anything he had ever done before. Most
of them did.
There were many courses of the ban
quet. How many no one but mine host
Whittemore knows, for before the fish
course had been reached Rev. Robert
]. Burdette, who for the evening was
just simply Bob" Burdette. and
Strickland w. Gillian. who grew ia
nous when as a member of the Herald
staff he wrote "Off again, on again,
gone again, Finnegan," snapped yarns.
First each told his funny story so that
the entire table could hear it and enjoy
it, then the contest grew warmer and
finally developed into a merry war of
personal "reminiscences of funny men.
w. r. Rose, the Cleveland Plain
Dealer man, sat between the two jOk-
istss or there is no telling where the
controversy would have led them. The
merry war was waxing fast and furi-
Gus when Amiable Secretary Frank C.
Starlight put in his peaceful oar and
told funny story that the whole table
had to laugh at.
If ever a mans face was his fortune
it is "Strick'' GiIlilan's His mug is a
sure cure for dyspepsia. and Bob"
Burdette's laugh is more contagious
than the bubonic plague. Between the
two the other funny men didn't have a
fair chance until Burdette, as toast
master, introduced them.
100 DID," Says Burdette.
Burdette introduced the speakers in
the funniest speeches of the evening.
He modestly called himself a back
number; told the humorists gathered
about the board that he had known
their fathers and grandfathers and was
getting too old to be really humorous.
And all the while he was funnier than
a goat.
The text of Burdette's sermon on
humor was "A merry heart doeth good
like a medicine"
In his little after-dinner talk Bur-
dette introduced a character little
known to the literary world. 1t was
Rose Field, brother of Eugene Field.
IF there had never been a Eugene
Field the world would have known
Rose Field and loved him." said Bur-
dette. LAS it was Eugene Field
ecHpSeQ MIN ana the WOflQ lOSI
bright literary light.
THAT never was one of my fail
ings," sighed Gillian. eve never done
anything to make it difficult for my
brothers" And yet when the tallest
building has crumbled to dust of
ag'in, on ag'in, gone ag'in Finnegan"
will be a classic.
Thomas A. Daily of Philadelphia,
president of the Press Humorist's as
ISOLATION, introduced Burdette as
POSTMASTER.
When Burdette had the floor to him
self he told about his early journalistic
life on the Peoria Transcript. He de-
clared he was of the old school and
added as an aside that when you found
anyone of the old school you had dis
covered an old stiff.
Difference in Schools.
The difference in the humor of the
old school and that of the new. was his
theme. He said that the humorist of
the old school took one little solitary
idea and pumped it full of wind until
it reached a column and a half, where
the same idea, or one very similar, and
reduce it to a paragraph.
You younger fellows who are doing
paragraphs that make the world laugh
with you are doing better work than
your fathers and grandfathers used to
do" said Burdette. You are doing
better work than any of the old school
can boast. You are doing better work
than Mark Twain
Then he introduced Will ]. hampton
of New York.
hampton was urged to say something
about ''yawps," but cleverly lodged
and told some delightfully."- funny ex-
periences in running a Republican
newspaper in Kentucky when the Dem
ocrats had about $1,000 majority in that
state.
He recalled his first book review,
which was of Rise and Fall of the
Mustache." He brought out a roar
about the boy who was a wonderful
mathematician and the wise examin-
ers failed to figure out the answers
most profound questions. He referred
to himself and others Of that day as of
the palezoic age.
He declared Dr. Burdette's claim
that he couldn't write humorous para
graphs now was not founded on facts,
and declared If the Hawkeye man
would go where there was less climate
he could again make the world laugh.
Burdette Sings.
DR.. Burdette sang Rocked in the
Cradle of the Deep" in imitation of an
unconscious humorist who sang it with
the accompaniment of a panorama ma
chine which had rusty squeak. This
was by way of introduction of w. G.
Rose of Cleveland.
The younger Rose sang an original
topical song, which he had dashed off
in busy moment. When it came to
the refrain of "All say aye" the en-
tire assembly voted throughout the
song and the vote invariably shook the
Alexandria from truck to keelson. The
song follows:
I belong to twenty lodges, and I'm chair
man of them all:
When ] tap my little gavel there is order
in the hall;
I'm great on parliamentaries-at least
that's what they say.
And when 1 put a motion, why put it in
this way:
Chorus:
All who are in favor please say "Ayer'
All who are contrary raise your hands up
high.
The noes have lost-the ayes have won.
Who says I'm wrong-where is my gun?
A xr-H, tn Mo Az