davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1907-05-29
Elephants.

People who really know nothing
about it used to say that elephants
never lie down to sleep. This is not
true at all, says one writer. They have
been known to stand for twelve
months without lying down to sleep.
This is regarded as want Of confidence
in their keepers and of longing to re-
gain their liberty, for when they are
perfectly at ease and reconciled to
their fate they will lie down on their
sides and sleep peacefully.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1907-05-29
When Life Is Wasted.

Life is wasted every time one gives
away to gloomy, selfish angry or re-
vengeful thoughts; when resentment
or grudge against man or fate is al
lowed to find root in the heart; when
the temper is let fly loose over trife;
when one goes to pieces nervously
when obliged to repeat remark and
the voice is allowed to rise in anger;
when one forgets that loose temper
is sign Of vulgarity and lack Of Gull
Press.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1907-05-29
julius Caesar.

The consensus of learned opinion is
to the effect that history's all around
greatest man was Julius Caesar, the
originator of Roman imperialism. Gaze
sar was great as a general and great
as a writer and speaker, but greater
as statesman. Could he have been
spared the assassin's dagger and been
permitted to live ten years longer he
might have set civilization ahead a
full thousand years.-New York Ameri-
can.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1907-05-29
Turner Hall
Program of Classes in Gymnastics.

Boys class, ages to IL: Wednesday
afternoon, 4:30 to $50; Saturday
forenoon, 900 to 1915.
Boys class, ages II to Ia: Monday
and Thursday afternoons, 4:3Oto $50
Youths class, ages Ia to 1t: Monday
evening. 1870 to 8:45 and Friday eve
ming, 1870 to $3.50.
Girls class, ages 6 to II: Tuesday af-
ternoon, 4:30 to $50, and Saturday
forenoon. l0:l5 to ll:SQ.
Girls class, ages II to Is: Tuesday
and Friday afternoons, 1870 to $50.
Misses class, age over Is; Wednesday
and Saturday evenings, 1880 to $50.
Ladies' class: Thursday evening, 500
to 900.
Mems class: Tuesday and Friday eve
nings, $3.50 to 9:45.
Fencing class: Sunday forenoon, 1000
to 11:30.
Sunday School: Sunday forenoon,
1920 to ll:45,
HERMAN Helm
Instructor.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1907-05-29

For a cold or a cough take Kenndy's
Laxative Cough Syrup. 1t is Better
than any other cough remedy because it's
laxative principle assures healthy,
.copious action of the bowels and at the
same it heals irritation of the throat.
strengthens the bronchial tubes and allays
inflammations of the mucous membrane.
Contains Honey and Tar, pleasant to
take Children like it. Conforms to the
Nation Pure Food and Drug Law.
Sold by Eugene A. Ptefferle.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1907-05-29

When your food has not been properly
digested the entire system is impaired IN
the same proportion. Your stomach
needs help. Kodol for Indigestion and
Dyspepsia not only digests what you
eat, it tones the stomach aud adds
strength to The whole body. Makes rich,
pure blood. Kodol conforms to the
National Pure Food and Drug Law.
Sold by Eugene A. Pfefferle.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1907-05-29

When your back aches it is almost
invariably an indication that something
is wrong with your kidneys. Weak,
diseased kidneys frequently cause a
break down Of the entire system. De.
Wits Kidney and Bladder Pills afford
prompt relief for weak kidneys, back
ache, Inflammation of the bladder and
all urinary troubles. Sold by Eugene
A. Pfefferle.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1907-05-29
Convenient Advancement.

"What are you buying now?"
II am looking for some present to
give my wife on her birthday. I tell
you, making presents costs a heap of
money"
"Why don't you do as do? 1 have
never failed to make my wife present
on her birthday every year for twenty
five years, and am not out penny
thus far"
''How do you manage it?"
ut is very simple. After we were
married, when her birthday came
round, gave her a f5 note When
my birthday came round, she gave me
the note back, and we have kept that
up ever since, and neither Of us is out
penny."-London Tit-Bits.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1907-05-29
The Happy Family.

Mrs. Scrappington Gn the midst Of
her reading)-Here is an item which
says that full grown rhinoceroses cost
$4,000 apiece. Mr.. Scrappington
(meanly Eh-yah! And isn't it a pity
that women can't wear them on their
ts?-Smart Set.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1907-05-29
Contrary Counsel.

The church was packed, even the
aisles lined with chairs. Just before
the benediction the thoughtful clergy
man, who loved order as he did the
gospel, thus admonished his hearers:
I'm passing out, please remain seat
ed until the ushers have removed the
chairs from the aisles." -Lippincott
Magazine
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1907-05-29
His Smile,

Old Hunks Sitting for his photo
graph)-What are you asking me to
look pleasant for? Blame it, amt I
smiling? Photographer-Yes sir; that's
why am asking you to try to look
pleasant.-Chicago Tribune.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1907-05-29
Friends Now.

Tom-Have you had any spats with
your girl lately? Dick No. We're
great friends now. -Hows that?
Dick-We'ye broken off our engage
ment.- Philadelphia Press.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1907-05-29
Misled.

Mrs. Gadsby-pll get even with Mrs.
Cable. Mrs. Gibby What has she
done to you? Mrs. Gadsby-Sh told
me that Mrs. Gufy wasn't at home, so
I hurried over to make call on her,
and she was at home, after ALL Gin
cinnai Leader.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1907-05-29
A Flippant JaiIbird.

This confinement" said the long
faced prison visitor, must distress you
greatly"
YES" replied the facetious convict,
II find the prison bars grating
"Ah, life to you is a failure!'
eyes; it's nothing but cell.''
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1907-05-29
The Seventh Time

he-When I accepted Jack he said
he felt as if he was In the seventh
heaven. HeI can well believe 1t. He
has been engaged six times before.
Fliegende Batter.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1907-05-29
Lazy.

Some friends were discussing an art
list whose laziness was proverbial.
He is SO lazy" said one, "that he
paints nothing but winter scenes to
save himself the trouble Of putting
leaves on the trees"
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1907-05-29
Made Sure Of Ii.

Molly When you spoke to father, did
you tell him you had $500 in the bank?
George Yes. Molly-And what did he
say? George He borrowed It sketchy
Bits.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1907-05-29

It is less to suffer punishment than
to deserve it.-Ovid.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1907-05-29

We are best Of all led to mems prin.
ciples by what they do.-Butler.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
WISE WORDS.

When you remember about avoid
Ing temptation it's too late.
It's awful unlucky to kiss a girl on
the sly when her father is looking.
The easier 1t is to preach thing
the harder 1t seems to practice 1t.
1t gives a man standing to have
pocketbook, even If there is moth
ing in it.
You can never convince a girl that
man loves her unless she can make
him jealous.
Men are so naturally conceited
that even one with whiskers thinks
people admire them.
When mans daughter is engaged
he can't go into the parlor even to
hunt for an old pipe.
When a woman keeps the baby
carriage in closet she speaks of it
at receptions as the nursery.
Modern women buy their hus-
bands cigars for them, but they don't
knit socks for them to wear.
Hardly any rich man could make
living following the advice he gives
to young men on how to do 1t.
It's mighty inconsistent for men
to blame women for not understand
ing politics when nobody does.
Even the man who denounces mill
lionaires brags about having ridden
In the same street car with one.
Anyway, when you send boy to
college you can feel sure that he is
not going to be trained to be miser.
Hardly anybody is so sure of heav-
en- that he starts for there with the
same enthusiasm he has for going
fishing.
The men who brag in the summer
what good furnaces they have in their
houses don't think it necessary to
mention 1t in winter.-From "Refec-
tions of Bachelor" in the New
York Press.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
NEW DEVICE FOR sEANcEs.
A Black silk Bag Which swells Out
With Spirit Hands.

A German spiritualist, writing In
Psychic Studies, describes a new ap-
paratus for obtaining what is known
as direct writing. 1t consists of
cubical box about a foot each way.
the front being formed of conical
bag of soft but closely woven black
silk. Through a hole in the tip of
the bag a pencil is placed, so that the
longer part is inside the bag and the
point outside.
"The notion is that a spirit hand
can materialize inside the conical bag
or sleeve" says the account, "and
can direct the movement of the pencil
over the paper. A medium, country
girl of fourteen, who can only read,
write and work the simplest arith-
metic, placed her hands on the top
of the box, in full sight, and soon the
conical bag swelled out as though a
hand were inside, and the pencil be-
gan to write. The box and bag being
entirely closed and dark inside, there
is no obstacle to the naturalization
of hand within; thus direct writing
can be obtained in lighted room. :"
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
SEA GULLs OF SHETLAND.
How People Look After the Big Birds
Only Tree on the Island.

Up little lane of Lerwick's one
street there is a garden. At least 1t
is an enclosed space. In the middle
of this space is tree. 1t is not
very tall tree; you could, in fact, toss
biscuit over its branches, but still
1t is a tree-the only tree in Shet-
land. And Shetland is proud of it.
Children who are brought for the
first time to see the wonders of one
streeted Lerwick are shown this tree.
This Is not fiction. 1t is the only
tree in Shetland.
AS there are no trees in Shetland,
there are no birds, except, of course,
the sea gulls, which you can number
by the thousand The sea gulls are
the sparrows of Lerwick, and as such
they have a greater share in the
towns life than have the sparrows
of London. In the morning time
you will note that sea gull sits on
every chimney pot. Sea gulls hover
over every roof in the town.
The air Is full of their strange,
high, plaintive. haunting cries. Their
sad, shrill, long drawn cries are to
Lerwick as the chattering of sparrows
or the cawing of rocks are to us in
England. Every house has its own
familiar sea gulls, and every street
its own band of sea gulls. They
never mix. The children in each
house have pet names for their own
particular sea gulls, and, having
called them by those names, they feed
them every day. And each sea gull
knows what is meant for him.
No sea gull attached to one house
ever seeks to eat the food scattered
from the house next door. He does
not dare; the other sea gulls would
kill him. So all day long the sea
gulls hover and call over the roofs
of Lerwick. The people of the town,
If they come across little pile of
rice laid upon the roadway, step over
it with care. They know that 1t is
placed there for some sea gull. And
at night the sea gulls leave their own
appointed chimney pots and fly grace
fully away to their resting places
on the rocks of the Isle of Moss
London Express.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
Flying Fish Caught With Rod.

Flying fishes may be caught in this
manner if one happens to find him
self surrounded by school of them
A variety of bats are employed in
their capture-bits of red bunting,
small spoon bats and artificial min
nows and flies-the most taking
being large red fly and a small gilt
minnow, but all the bats mentioned
are effective. In following the min
now through the water the fish will
open both pectoral fins and poise it,
self for a rush at it. Spreading the
wings also has the effect of checking
progress If its suspicious are aroused
by a near inspection, of the bait.
When hooked it proves very game,
taking out several yards of line in
its first rush and often making a
fight in the air with line and ALL
Paradise of the Pacific.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
Toast to Laughter.

Here's to laughter, the sunshine
of the soul, the happiness of the
heart, the leaven of youth, the priv
ilege of purity, the echo of innocence,
the treasure of the humble, the
wealth of the moor, the bead Of the
cup of pleasure; 1t dispels detection.
banishes blues and mangles melan-
choly; for it's the foe of woe, the
destroyer of depression, the enemy
of grief; 1t is what kings envy peas
ants, plutocrats envy the poor, the
guilty envy the innocent; it's the
sheen on the silver Of smiles, the
ripple on the waters delight, the
CLINT of the gold of gladness; without
1T humor would be dumb, wit would
wither, dimples would disappear and
smiles would shrivel, for it's a glow
of clean conscience, the voice of
pure soul, the birth cry of mirth, the
swan-song of sadness. Laughter!-
Life.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
A Good Critic.

Sir Henry Irving, the English
actor, once wanted white horse to
use in one of his scenes, but no white
horse that was suitable could he get.
At last, the London Globe tells the
story, stage-hand advised him to
apply to certain distinguished
actor-manager, who, he said, had
such horse.
Sir Henry visited the owner, in
spected the horse, and the bargain
was concluded, but as an after
thought, Sir Henry said he trusted
the animal was not fractions.
mot at all, Sir Henry, l assure
you; an excellent horse in every way.
Why, / rode him night after night,
and all had to complain of was that
he would occasionally yawn when /
was on the stage"
Indeed" said Sir Henry. "a bit
of critic, then, evidently"
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
A Tip to Careless Women.

Sometimes l wonder" said the
particular man, ''if half the women
take the trouble before they start
out to see how they look in the back.
l don't believe they do. l have seen
women as neat as new pins as far as
their necks and waists and shoes
were concerned, when they faced you,
but the moment you gos a look at
their backi Wow! Shoes down at
the heel, hole in the stocking, SAT-
ETY. pins at the waist lire, buttons I'M
buttoned on the waist, the neck half
fastened and the back hair looking
as if it had hardly been combed If
they haven't any eyes for the back Of
them, we have. Philadelphia Rec.
ord.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
The Cold Shoulder.

At reception in Washington some
time ago one of the guests, man
with a poor memory for faces and,
in addition, little near-sighted, took
the host aside and spoke to him in a
confidential whisper.
"You see that tall man standing
by the door," he asked.
"Yes."
"Well, was talking to him awhile
ago about the terribly cold weather
in Nebraska last year, and he yawned
in my face"
The host smiled. Don't you know
who he isl" asked he.
NO"
THAT'S Lieutenant Peary, the Arc.
tie explorer. r."-Harper's Weekly.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
The Mean Thing!

Praise from husbands lips is all
ways pleasant to the wife; but the
praise may be too discriminating to
suit her.
Il thought it was nice of you to
tell that carpenter, who seemed to
think women know nothing, that
could hammer nails like lightning"
said Mrs. Morse to her husband.
But I'm afraid, dear, you are not
an unprejudiced Judge. really
don't think I'm such a very good
hammerer"
"oh, he knew what l meant" said
Mr.. Morse, cheerfully. "You know
lightning never strikes twice in the
same place, they say"
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
Redskin Philosophy.

would know a great deal more IL
I could forget a lot I should never
have learned.
The Frog is great Warrior to
the Fly.
A jug of Firewater will hold bar
rel of Tomahawks.
Paleface chooses his Chiefs from
those with the dirtiest hands.
Angry-Man stampedes his own
stock.
Heap of wisdom in knowing even
a little well.
One arrow is worth a thousand
words.
Even the Eagles eye has never
seen tomorrow sun.-Life.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
Bachelors.

Bachelors can be found roaming
at large in all parts of the world.
They inhabit apartments, clubs, open
fields, bodies of water and music
halls. They hover at times near front
gates, and have been found in back
parlors with the aid of a search
light.
Bachelors are nomadic by nature
and variable in their tastes, never
going with one girl long enough to
be dangerous.
Bachelors make love easily, but
rarely keep 1t. Rich bachelors are
hunted openly and shamelessly, and
are always in great danger. Those
who finally escape are. as rule,
useless ever afterwards. Tom Mas.
son, in the Delineator.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
Making q Million Dots.

The English noblemen of a CEN
tury ago used to spend great part
of their time in making wagers of the
most centric character.
For instance, in 1870, before the
days of rapid transit, an earl wagered
that he could find man to travel
from London to Edinburgh and back
in less time than it took another peer
to make million dots.
Sir George Liddel laid wager,
and won it, that he could make a
journey to Lapland and return, bring
ing back with him two native women
and two reindeer, within a specified
time.-Sunday Magazine.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
Deepest Gold Mine.

Australia now possesses the deep
est gold mine in the world. Within
the last few weeks the shafts at the
new Chum Railway at Bendigo, Vic
toria, have been sunk to depth of
over 1900 feet, and the quartz there
tapped has been sampled and
crushed, with the result that yield
of gold equal to an ounce per ton
has been obtained. The operations
in the mine have been tested by Gov
ernment officials in view of the fact
that never before in the worlds his
tory has gold been obtained from so
low a depth as three-quarters of a
mile.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
Did You Ever?

Excuse me just a minute!" said
the Old Codger, in his rasping way,
interrupting the discussion which
was occupying that particular session
of the Sit and Argue Club. 81 don't
know anything of consequence about
the subject, but I'd like to ask, be-
fore I forget 1t, a question that laid
awake quite spell last night think
Ing about: Did any of you ever see q
reformer who was real fat?"-Puck.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
Capital Punishment in Russia.

While the Douma has voted the
abolition of capital punishment, the
revolutionists continue to kill police
officials at Warsaw. We have pro-
gressed since the days of Alphonse
Karr. Let messieurs the assassins
begin." was his reply when the sup
preston of capital punishment was
to him. To-day they de-
mand q monopoly.-L'Eclair.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
Grounded.

Telegraphing across the Persian
desert is subject to many Interrupt
tions.
One day in Yezd, says the author
of Five Years in Persian Village" /"
one of the European residents want
ed to dispatch telegram, and sent
to the office to learn when the line
would be up.
"The trouble is not that the line
is down." came back the polite reply.
1T is always down. Unfortunately,
a camel has stepped on it,
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
Paradise.

"Whah not only de wicked ceases
from troublin', an de weary am at
rest, but whah," here Parson Crinkle-
top lowered his voice to a hoarse
whisper, while he leaned far over
the pulpit to look his awestruck
flock the fuller in the face, "dey has
ter stop in de middle OBJ de colleck-
shin. ter 60 an empty de box!"-
Puck.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30

1t is reported that scheme is on
foot to construct dam across the
Rhone at Seyssel in order that cleo
trical energy may be generated there
and transmitted to Paris by an over
head line
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
sc|EN(E'xzBgAg|cs

The skeleton of megatherium has
been dug up by excavators in the
Avenue Bosquet, Paris.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30

She always addressed him as Mr..
Until he took courage and Kr.
But now that they're wed
Like brute. he has said
That he wishes TO goodness he'd MI
Pearson's Weekly.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
HIS ROYAL TITLE.

"who is that silent man sitting
next to Elsa?"
"That! Oh. that's Louis XIV"
Louis the Fourteenth" T.
"Yes; his name Is Louis. and we
call him The Fourteenth because we
only invite him when we find we are
going to be thirteen at table. Mod
arm Sonietv
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
THE GAME GOES ON.

Quite lonely now the hammock swings
Upon the WIDE wind-swept veranda,
While in the parlor sweetly sings
Miranda.
And at her side with back a-crook,
To drink song sentiments that carry,
With eyes that have a rapturous look,
Leans Harry.
So thus we see, without n doubt,
The game goes on, for there's no reason
Why Cupid should care aught about
The season.
indianapolis News.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30

Farmers living near Wabash are
back of a scheme to dam Mississine-
wa River for the purpose of generat-
ing electricity to be used as motive
power and for lighting purposes in
that neighborhood
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30

Farmers living near Wabash are
back of scheme to dam Mississine-
wa River for the purpose of generat-
ing electricity to be used as motive
power and for lighting purposes in
that neighborhood.
In his address to the Chemical Sec
tion of the British Association Prof.
Wyndham Dunstan remarked that
the production of rubber by chem
ical means had been virtually accom-
plished by its formation from iso-
prene.
The cost of car repairs on the lines
of the Hartman System has averaged
$2.42 per car per month for 11,704
steel freight cars, and s3.74 per car
per month for 1854 wooden freight
cars. These figures are the averages
Of records covering a period of sew
enteen months.
Beans are at present cleaned by
hand work, which is not only slow,
but unsatisfactory. The beans are
scattered on a belt which passes be-
fore a row Of girls, and stones, dirt
and other Objectionable particles are
picked out. In this way the cleaning
capacity of each girl is between three
and five bushels per hour.
The city of Vienna has undertaken
the installation of what is perhaps
the most remarkable electric, or elec-
trically lighted, fountain in existence.
platz. Underneath the fountain, in
huge cemented chamber, are
placed twenty-seven rejecting lamps,
capable of producing seventy different
luminous and colored effects. The
light is transmitted through the wa
ters of the fountain. The light power
Of the plant is estimated as equal to
900, 100000 candles.
Sir Patrick Manson, in his recent
lectures on tropical diseases, al
though accepting the theory that the
only mode of transmission of marsh,
or malarial, fever is through the bite
of the Anopheles mosquito, adds the
statement, which will probably be
new to most readers, that the mos
quitoes are capable of becoming in
fected by absorbing the blood not
merely of human patients, but also
of anthropoid apes, and perhaps even
of various other mammals, which, in
an evolutionary sense, are related to
man
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1907-01-30
Lost Manhood Restored.
Weaknesses of Young Men
Cured and All Private
Diseases.
He will forfeit the sum Of S.
600 for am case Of Fits or
Epileptic Convu1sions

Consultation free in English and German
and strictly confidential. Write If you
cannot call.
Office hours: From 0 a. m. to $50 D. m. On
Sundays 9 to 12 a. m. only.