River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1907-12-26

I from going back and proposing to
her!"
"How lucky you did" commented
the widow witheringly.
But l wouldn't have" explained
the bachelor ruefully, eff the gorl had
restrained herself"
Nevertheless" repeated the widow.
"It was lucky-for the girl"
(Which girl?" asked the bachelor
''The girl I broke off with or the girl
that came afterward?"
Il suppose" unused the widow ig-
noring the levity and leaning over to
arrange a bunch of violets at her belt,
that is why it is so difficult for
man to keep a promise or a VOW
even marriage VOW
"Oh, l don't know" The bachelor
leaned back and regarded the widows
coronet braid through the smoke of
his cigar. 1T isn't the marriage vows
that are so difficult to keep. It's the
fool vows a man makes before mar
riage and the fool promises he makes
afterward that he stumbles over and
falls down on. The marriage vows
are SO big and vague that you can get
all around them without actually
breaking them, but if they should in
terpolate concrete questions into the
service such as, DO you, William,
promise not to growl at the coffee
COR, DO you, Mary, promise never
to put daub of powder on your nose
again?" broke in the widow.
'Nor to look twice at your pretty
stenographer," continued the bache-
| lor
Nor to lie about your age, or your
foot or your waist measure"
"Nor to juggle with the truth when
ever you stay out after half-past ten"
Nor to listen to things that-that
any body-eXcept your husband may
say to you in the conservatory-oh
L see how it feels!" finished the wild
ow with sympathetic little shudder.
"And yet" reflected the bachelor,
"a woman is always eXacting vows
and promises from the man she loves,
always putting up bars-for him to
! Jump over when if she would only
! leave him alone he would be perfectly
contented to stay within bounds and
Craze in his own pasture. A man
hates being pinned down; but wom-
an doesn't want anything around that
she can't pin down, from her belt and
/ her theories to her hat and her hus-
| band"
WELL" protested the widow study
/ ing the toe of her slipper, ''it is a sat
isfaction to know you've got your hus-
band fastened on straight by his
promises and held in place by his
own vows and that he loves you
enough to-
Usually" interrupted the bachelor,
"a man loves you in inverse ratio to
his proteStations. The lover who
promises all things without reserve
is too often like the fellow who
doesn't question the hotel bill nor ask
the price of the wine, because he
doesn't intend to pay it anyway. The
fellow who is prodigal with his VOWS
and promises and poetry is generally
the one to whom such things mean
nothing and, being of no value, can
be flung about generously to every
girl he meets. The firm with the big
gest front Office is likely to be the
one with the smallest deposit in the
safe. The man who swears off loud
est on New Years is usually the one
they have to carry home the morning
after. And the chap who promises a
girl a life of roses is the one who will
let her pick all the thorns OF for her
SELF"
Perhaps" sighed the widow, chew
ing the stem of violet thoughtfully,
"the best way to cure man of a
taste for anything, after all, is to let
him have too much of it instead of
making him swear off. If you want
him to hate the smell of pipe insist
on his smoking all the time. If you
want him to sign the temperance