New-York tribune., 1907-08-20
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

II IS not the millionaire or the who can
afford to have an automobile without feeling the
pinch who is the thorn In the side Of the bicycle
policeman. who has TO keep u sharp eye out that
the machines do not proceed faster than the law
allows The policemen stationed along upper Fifth
avenue. Broadway and Riverside Drive are OF one
mind this point. To them often II is shame
10 have to arrest your dyed-in-the-ucre rich man
fer fast driving he is cOnsiderate about It
When he runs foul Of the speed regulator. accord
ing Of the policemen. as rule II is not hard
70 persuade him 20 go along to the station house
But with the skate who has Just enough TO own
a Tnachine-or perhaps has hired lit is different.
said a policeman. "If these people had all tho
power they assert they have when they are caught
in the and invoked It as regularly as they say
they Will Td have been broke long ago and back
at my old Job OF laying bricks. instead Of riding
wheel Its pleasure to run these fellows in
The veracious verger-In tE.s far eorne- Hos
William the ConkeT. > ind the origin, where you
can't see EN-; are the tooms OF Guy Fox, Robin Robin
book, Gs sees YOU ave in your aHa' tell you VINO
The skeptica Tourist-No; but can guess
London Opinion
Patriotic Poles are rejoicing over the news that
the national collection historical art objects.
books anu archives now kept in the castle at
Rapperswrl switzerland. WI soon be taken TO
Lemberg 70 form the nucleus of a Polish
scum. The collection is rich in ethnographical OBJ
iects and historical documents. one special relic
IS the heart of the Polish patriot Kosciuslo. who
at Dutenta, In 1892. with four thousand men. kept
eighteen thousand Russians at bay for Ave days
and later successfully defended Warsaw against
the Prussians.
so you want my daughter?" said the stern
Yes sir" answered the young suitor modesty
iiuh- SfuIted tHe oii man Cot any money!
Yes. sir How high do you quote her?'-Cleve-
land Leader
A Hamburg paper tells this story about the Kali
attention detail: Shortly after his arrival
at Swinemunde the Kaiser standing the
bridge of the Hohenzollern. when he noticed that
the sentry. a member of the Stettner Royal Grena-
diers on duty near the customs officer wore top
coat but had his trousers over his boots. The
Kaiser shouted to the lieutenant OF the guard.
Lieutenant. when topcoats the trousers
be inside the boots" The officer. an ex-
tremely youthful fellow. became confused and did
not know what to Go say and the Emperor
called. in louder tones: Lieutenant. l again call
your attention TO the regulation-boots must be
the trousers by who top
coats The command Their flew from post to post
pedestrians wondered why the soldiers sud
denly became busy with their boots.
Wen answered Mir Cumrox, 'Im not exactly
fond of it. but 1t doesn't disturb as much as it
used to-'-WashingtoD Star.
About six weeks ago a finch flew into an open
window. writes in Hamburg to a Ger
paper land made himself at home. The
him and fed him milk and zwieback He made
regular trips out into the air. but always returned
The took him a trip to Heidelberg and
writing from hotel there says: Hans is still
with and sweet and affectionate always al
though no Is growing 70 be quite naughty. He
fights with any bird coming his feeding place.
He roams about all day. spends few minutes with
me now and then and for three nights has not been
at home at all Every guest In the hotel knows
MIN and wonders his conhding manner AS /
writ ia he sits table me nd tn nv
ton. Shall send your lover he answers Peep"
salary Rae e Sae esI nsyr IN G back
How in the world did they happen to do that?'
'I announced from the pulpit" explained the
good man that unless 1n | got It I would not be
planned."-Chcago News.
There is an elderly but well preserved clerk in
one OF the departments at Washington. says "Iar-
per's Weekly whose extremely martial bearing.
together with the red face and white hair so inti-
n1ately associated in the popular mind with the
military has on more than one occasion caused ts
old gentleman to be taken for some distinguished
officer. This mistake the part of his fel-
low citizens is a source of much qualification to
the old gentleman and he never loses an oppor-
tunity to heighten the Illusion on their part Re-
Gently this clerk was in a Pullman attached to a
train for New York, when the usual mistake oc-
Cured. Several men saluted the distinguished
clerk, which salutes he returned with military
gravity. Finally, a man giving evidence of having
dined a BIT too freely greeted the old chap with:
How you general?' The old gentleman did
not reply. but gave the unknown a glance OF great
severity. Then. turning TO train boy who CHANGED
to be passing at the moment, he called out: Here
boyl Give a copy of the Army and Navy Reg
ister!'"
Wife-I don't know where that child got his vile
temper from--not from me. I'm sure.
Husband (sadly)--No, my DEAR you certainly
haven't lost any Of yours.-Tit-Bits.