Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1907-11-22
ABSENCE OF MIND.
A Funny Story About Ampere, the "a
nous Mathematician. Ss Gs3s

H.
NOUS. Mathematician.
You all know the old joke of the pro
fessor who, bordering over the saying
that in d railway accident absence OF
body was a good deal better than alb
sence of mind, went to the nearest
railway station and tried to take a
ticket "for the nearest railway acct
dent so as to have the matter proved
to his own satisfaction. You doubt
less know the story, too, Of the pro
lessor Of mathematics whose new par
Tor maid told him when he rang at his
own door that Professor Jones was
out. 'I'll call again, I'll call again" he
said and went away.
But these are stories merely. Here
however, are some incidents from real
life: Ampere was remarkably absent
minded. Hundreds Of stories of his
observation-disclosures are told, but quite
the funniest is that of his dinner at the
house of M. Fontanes. the grand mas
ter Of the University of Paris. For a
joke somebody had told Ampere that
| he must go to the dinner IN his aca-
| denician's uniform of green and gold
| and girt with his sword. When he got
to the house he was very much an
noyed to find everybody else in ordi-
nary evening dress. II will get rid of
the sword at all events,'' he said to
| himself and slipped it behind the cush-
ions Of a sofa. After dinner Ampere
forgot himself, as usual, and became
lost in abstruse calculation. He took a
little piece Of chalk out Of his pocket
and began working out problems on
the black satin cover of the mantel-
| piece. He became SO absorbed in what
he was doing that all the guests left
4 without his noticing them, and when
| he wrote down @. e.. D. no one was
left in the room except Nine. Fon.
tanes, and she unfortunately sat fast
! asleep on the sofa where Ampere's
sword lay. hidden.
/ Ampere went down upon his knees
and pulled gently at the sword, so as
to get it away. without waking the
lady. He pulled and pulled, and pres
Il emily the sword came out-without the
scabbard. At this moment Nine. Fon
/. tanes awoke and alarmed the house
with her screams Of terror at seeing {
man on his knees before her with {
i drawn sword in his hand.
I But mathematical professors have
1 not the monopoly of absentminded
4 ness. La Fontaine, whose fables arr
the delight Of adult Frenchmen ant
their children's earliest task, went t,
&; the court Of Louis XVI. to present ;
copy of his fables to the king. And HI
7 forgot the book. Fortunately, the kin,
knew La Fontaine, his fables and hi
foibles and gave him a thousand pts
+ toles (about $3.50. Unfortunately
though, La Fontaine left the money II
his hired carriage on his way back t
I Paris. .a II 81.
But the prethest piece Of absent
4 mindedness of which have ever hear
was that of Professor Pozzi, who ask
ed a lady who was bewailing the fac
X that she had no children whether sh
thought the failing was hereditary
i This Is even more amusing than til
delightful answer made by the eng
: neer of the Seine tunnel, M. Berlier, t
a servant who told him when he wen
to call upon his lawyer that that ger
tleman had died that morning. tOh,
said NJ. Berlier, dear, dear, I'm SO sol
ry. But tell him I won't keep him
minute St James Gazette.
4, ft. + d x. Eagf o.. ~