Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-10-19
q OMETHiNG happened at the Balt- come to
- or

come to the conclusion that 1T Is not al
/ ways advisable to speak the truth the
whole truth and nothing but the truth.
| 1T is quite impossible as the world is
| constituted, he declares, Ito be per
! fectly frank and truthful. even for day.
| II one is to live amicably with ones fell
| lows certain amount of dissimu alton
which is really untruth-is absolutely
necessary.
| When 1 arose this morning l made
| up my mind that for one day l would
| speak nothing but the truth. and the re-
! suit has been that l have given such Of
| tense 10 several people, including three
old friends, that I doubt whether they'll
/ speak to me again.
What's more I happened to be an
hour and a half late in getting to my Of
flee in the morning. as l was seeing
! friend off to Europe. When l reached
| BILE was.
| Il might have said to him that 1 was
| feeling unwell. and been excused. but
| following my determined policy l told
him the truth. The result was l not only
got a roasting. but came pretty hear get
ting fired.
The fact is. if we all followed this
estimable but impracticable method of al
ways saying what We really mean this
| earth as dwelling place would speedily
become impossible. These days We have
| all got to be more or less hypocrites.
* = * *
Parents who undertake to assist their
children in the preparation of their school
lessons encounter some queer difficulties"
said d Washington father OF a pair of pub
lie school students Long division. for, in
stance, presents stumbling blocks that
trip up the wisest minds of a generation
ago. In that benighted age youthful stu
dents of arithmetic were taught that in
an example in long division the d.visor
was placed at the left of the dividend,
the quotient the right, while the re-
mainder was written at the end of the
quotient. Old fogies who have dropped
hopelessiy behind the tines now attempt
to introduce those Anticipated methods
when tutoring Their Offspring but the
youngsters scornfully correct them.
Then according to present-day lnstruc-
ton they put the QGotient above thee divi-
dend and set the remainder in the little
crook on the right formerly occupied by
the Quotient. Before these eccentrcties
of modern education the parent sits
amazed and helpless. trying to prepare
himself for the next innovation. which
will probably be TO makee the figures up
side down."
=. = !; =
A Washington woman has a colored
cook who is inordinately fond of theater-
y
odrama that she patronizes. but recently
her wishes sent her to see one of those
serious. psychological drama merely for
the fun Of experiment.
The next morning the kitchen queen was
voluble in the expression of her enjoy
ment of the performance Her mistress
questioned her and found that the girl
could not even remember the name of the
play. She was assured that "a paper"
that the girl had brought home would tell
the title of the drama Returning, pro-
gram in hand. the girl exclaimed:
"Yessum. hits on hyeah. HIT wuz DE
Cast Of Characters.
A frowsy individual of the hobo frater-
nifty was holding up one side of the tenn
perance fountain at 7th street and Penn
sylvania avenue the other day and look
ing utterly woebegone. when a humane
old gentleman alighted from one of the
avenue cars. The venerable man had me-
chemically taken a transfer for the 18th
street line, notwithstanding his destina-
ton was one of the national banks at that
corner. Observing the turnpike tourist
summing himself at tina fountain the old
gentleman approached him and said:
"A nice trip in the pretty outskirts of
the city this fine day would do you good,
my man"
''Y-a-a-s," drawied the tramp lazily,
but a nice. tall schooner Of beer would
do me more good"
Tut. tut" rejoined the good Samari-
tan. Il have no doubt strong drink has
been your ruination already. Here. take
this railroad transfer and go out to Chevy
Chase lake and get a breath of pure
ozone. That will be better than beer"
Well. you are generous. old gentle
man." the roadster replied with tinge of
sarcasm. II don't know where the Chev-
city Chase lake is, but you can't chase me
out there on a street car and make me
walk back. Give me quarter. me good
Samaritan, and l will tour to the lake la
electricity vehiculus, get several whiffs of
the rarus ozonicus and journey back hith-
erward by the great iron rail of the cor
pOration Of"
But the old gentleman had fled