The Ordway new era., 1907-05-10
710C01ll|0NPE|lllES
HOW THEY HAVE KEPT POSTAL
ACCOUNTS FROM BALANCING
Chicago once One Cent Over for s'x'
teen vsars While Son Of lebanon
ill., Postmaster Keeps
Voucher for u.

l
Chicago.-Herein is told how two
cents-common. ordinary, copper pen
nies-have separately and individuai
Is, and for l6 years. tangled up Uncle
Sans post office departments cast
accounts until miles and miles OF rec
tape have been intricately convolutee
around their hidden outlines.
One Of these cents hides chuckiine
In some obscure corner OF the COD
webbed accounts of the Chicago post
| Office. Far down In spidery column
OF long-legged figures this little miss
ing coin reposes. and nobody has ever
| been able to rout him out with pole
ever so long The perplexity OF him.
| who he is, why he is. and how he got
there. has worried half to death book
keepers in Chicago and bookkeepers
| in Washington. and has gone clean up
TO the third assistant postmaster gen
eral who is head of the auditing de-
partment
This cent, this grain of microscopic
dust which leers so plainly from the
polished cog of smooth running gov
ernment machinery. first blew there
during the regency of Charles U. Cor
don. When Mr.. Gordon relinquished
the reins to +. +. Coyne the Cent, with
all due solemnity, was handed over.
Likewise when Mr.. now mayor, Busse
vaulted into the saddle. the same Cent.
leering with pompous Importance, fig
ured prominently in the transfer. And
when Mr.. Busse gave place to Mr..
Campbell the same Cent. now moss
grown and venerable with age, went
over too.
; The other cent was mystery until
the other day. and then 1t was cleared
up by W. l.. Clucas.
Mr.. Clucas' father. W. ]. Clucas. was
postmaster OF Lebanon. Ill, at the
time that thriving community was still
village.
When Mr.. Clucas. Sr.. made up his
accounts for the year of 1890 he sent
one cent too much in total remit
tance OF something like $4,000 This
one cent came TO light in checking up
at Washington, and so a voucher for
that sum was sent back TO Mr. Clucas
over the imposing signature OF Madl.
son Davis. then third assistant post
master general under President Gro
yer Cleveland.
The voucher arrived on January 5.
1891. Mr.. Clucas was so tickled by
this evidence of the paternal care OF
the ever.watchful government that he
forebore TO cash the infinitesimal
check. but kept IT as an heirloom.
Because he did this. whole rivers of
midnight ink, and flaming incandes-
cent suns OF electric lights have been
wasted by the post office department
in chasing that elusive copper up and
down the columns OF huge brown
leather-backed account books.
AS a matter OF fact. however. Mr..
Clucas could not have cashed this tiny
check without spending hundreds of
dollars on 1t. When his father handed
over the document IL was not in
dorsed, and he died without having in
dorsed 1t.
In order to collect this cent. there.
fore, It will be necessary for Mr.. Clu-
cas- 20 start suit against the United
States government. which would in.
volye payment OF huge sums in fees
TO lawyers. all for the doubtful glory
of getting copper cent from Uncle
Sam. He, therefore. intends TO frame
the warrant and hand it down to his
children's children.
For as long. therefore. as the United
States government runs. and as long
as the warrant is held out, the books
at Washington will miss balancing but
just the fraction of hair.
This story teaches how unbelievably
accurate the machinery of government
must run. Handling billions of dollars
annually, If so much as one cent re-
mains unaccounted for. on the books
1t stays.
"As much care is paid by the gov.
ernment to one cent as to thousand
dollars" said John NJ. Hubbard. assist.
ant postmaster. There is no means
OF charging off to profit and loss. or to
petty cash, the money whose disposi
tion is not recorded. Checks and bal
ances must be so nicely adjusted as
to weight even to the millionth frac
tion of hair before it can pass un
challenged under the careful scrutiny
of Uncle Sam"
I