The sun., 1907-08-04

from the main tide oS people on Broadway
But some rowdy crunched his heel into the
toe of my Wife's shoe and she was in such
pain that had 10 half lead and half carry
her over to the Fifth Avenue Hotel. We
hadn't got more than half the way to Broad
way before the fireworks went on. taking
the legs on n lot OF unfortunat0s.
Three years ago In Tegncigalpa, Hon.
iuras, ] attended "a night lawn fAto given
by one of tho officials OF the Honduras
Government. ] missed two bad jobs on
that night by pure luck.
First thing was that didn't eat an~
OF the ice cream or Rherbets that were
served, because | don't care for that stun
In some way the ice cream and sherbete
were poisoned and everybody that par.
everybody at the fete except myself
made deadly i'll after the breaking up OF
the party. several OF them dying:
The AFFAIR that caused the sudden break
/ missed by chance. A messenger who'd
been fired from the Government employ
foA too much mescal bibuloeity jumped into
the mems smoking room carrying his acute
case OF delirium tremene with him. and
before he could be corralled he'd stabbed
five OF the men in the smoking room with a
long knife.
I'D lust left that smoking room n minute
or 30 before to see the dancing of the children
Of the guests. One OF the stabbed men
died and the others were laid up in hospital
for "A long time.
1--we ducked two fatei automobile acc-
dents by the narrowest squeaks, First time
/ was in a big touring car with a crowd
of Honolulu good fellows that gave a luuau
-picnic-back in the Nuuanu Valley.
at was q somewhat wiriey and saki-sh
affair and so when we climbed back into
the car to ride up on to the road overlooking
the Nuuanu gorge there was bit Of risk in IL,
especially as it was a cloudy night and the
host of the luuau, who was driving the car,
was q mite unsteady and careless. When
we got to the top of the roadI stepped out Of
the car to stretch my legs-I was the only
one to get out.
Il hadn't much more than hit the ground
before the brake snapped, and, the car being
hill Two of the fellows jumped, but the
driver and three other stuck. The car
rolled mt terrific speed into n huge boulder.
Two of the men In tho car were killed, in
Guiding the driverA
"Other time I missed being bunged up
or killed in motor car accident was two
years ago in Chicago. party of engineers
attending a convention there started out
in big car TO run over the bouevards. |
accompanied them for an hour or SO, but
when the car got within hitting distance OF
my hotel told 'em that I'D drop out for a
little while TO write a letter and send an inn
portant telegram.
They dumped me at the hotel, promising
to come back and pick me up again in a
half hour or 80. The chauffeur of the hired
car had been drinking and he ran the car
full tilt iniSo a loaded brewery wagon over
on the sonth side. Tho chauffeur and the
engineer on the front seat with him were
both killed and the other fellows sorely
damaged
There are some other messes that I've
managed 20 miss, but there's no use going
on" wound up Mr.. Kittson. Il don't know
what to make Of it all. This thing OF being
ever just a hop, skip and jump ahead OF
the worst forms of bother is beginning to
get on nay nerves some and I'll be glad
when | ,an quit travelling and spend the
rest of MY life on my front porch outside
OF Pittsbtrg, because people who know me
are beginning to hold me responsible for
every dis aster that happens in the world.
'Kittson must have been there Just be-
fore it happened is what they say. and
it's almost as bad as being n Jonahdoo
oneself as to be held responsible for calami-
ties forever happening TO other people