davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16
ADRIFT WITH THE TIMES

nouncement does not disprove the fact that the average age of a ballet dancer is 106 years. The danseuse in question was cut off in her prime.
 DIDN'T COUNT. She said farewell But bear in mind It was the prima Donna kind.
 Birmingham Age-Herald. She wept with grief And tore her hair, But kindly note, crowd was there.
 -St Louis Times. THE SMILE THAT COUNTS. The smile that counts Is the one you wear When the clouds obscure The heavens fair.
 Milwaukee Sentinel. When the wind is cold And the sky is drear, 'Taint the smile that counts It's the underwear
 St. Louis Times. When Jack Frost "nipsp Or whistles by note 'Tis then the weight Of your overcoat.
 Buffalo Times. When the ice is thick And the snow is deep, What a fellow then wants Is a warm place to sleep.
 Ohio Sun When night comes down And cold winds blow There's fun to be had. At a burlesque show. The debutante Is now tripping forth and playing the very devil with her eyes.
 SIMPLY GREAT. A smile or two, A tender word. As leaves by wind Are softly stirred. A form close held And kisses sweet Gee whiZ, true love Is hard to beatl
 Birmingham Age Herald A kid or two, A sleepy word The frigid air Is loudly stirred. A form close held That has cold feet Gee whiz. think you Iris hard to beat?
 D. c. H. There ought to be a lot of money in operating a steamboat up Salt River.
 RECOVERY. Poor Wall Street makes A little bow And says, 'I feel Much better now''
 PAUL COOK.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

A burglar cured a mans toothache in New Jersey by appearing suddenly on the scene and hitting him with a club. The experience was nearly as bad as going to see a dentist
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16
FINE CARTOONS.

From the Centreville Press.
 The Advertiser cartoon of Looking up Dexter Avenue and The Age-Herald's "Salome Dancing for the Head of Smith" are two of the best that these anti Conner papers have ever published
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

A man has been indicted in Okla homa for calling another man liar. Evidently, Oklahoma is determined to show this country model state in every particular
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

The Houston Post says the climate of Texas makes the hair red within a few weeks after one moves into the state. Living in Texas is enough to make anybody red-headed
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

President Roosevelt should count the vessels of the fleet going to the Pacific when he reviews them, and then he should take Admiral Bob Evans aside and tell him he expects him to bring back a given number of ShiDs
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

Boss Cox of Cincinnati is getting ready to turn out 5000 republican officeholders who do not belong to his faction. This is considered the pure leaf lard of reform in Cincinnati.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

Mrs. Russell Sage Is becoming al- most as prudent and thrifty as Hetty Green, and that is the limit.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

MT Roosevelt is a courageous man, but he did not have courage enough to challenge Hitachiyamaa, the Japan csc wrestler, to trial of strength.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

The trouble about Hearst is he is not warranted to stay eliminated. The act of elimination should be annual.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

The sad suicide of jackass is re- ported. However, that is not the first suicide of jackass.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

If King Edward concludes to wear his new Cullinan diamond in his neck tie the hotel clerks will be driven to suicidal graves.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

Weston walks right along, snow or no snow He is walking against time from Maine to Chicago, and he en- counters a new kind of scrip each day.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

Abe Hummel will soon be released from prison, and he proposes to start anew by making tour of the mon- archies of the effete east.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

The present financial stringency does not justify the dropping of sus- bender buttons into the collection box. Scrip does not go that far.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

Indian summer is billed to supplant the cold snap for at least two weeks engagement.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

Theodore E. Burton has suffered a bacxset, but he still hopes to keep Senators Foraker and Dick a-guessing.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

Gold and Thanksgiving turkeys are national needs at present.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

Weston, the 6O-year-old pedestrian, is getting over the ground with his eye and nose fixed on Chicago.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

Tom Platt has a streak of malice in his makeup, else he never would have openly declared for Taft.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

A Cincinnati man who thinks he is Edgar Allen Poe should be given his crazy papers without delay.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

The cost of funerals has gone up, but this cannot be said to increase to the man in the hearse the cost of living.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

This touch of winter is but temper ary. Winter does not begin in this latitude until Christmas time. The weather man should take notice.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

A Maryland man eloped with a woman weighing 309 pounds, and it is safe to assr,e that he didn't carry her in bis ai ' the old heroic way
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

People who know when to be deaf have learned one of the fine arts, , remarks the Corpus Christi Caller of Texas. Also when to be dumb.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

Another sign of the times is that the three.ball shops are busy.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

Anna Gould practically tells the world she has had all the matrimonial experience she feels she needs.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

The British fog declined to change it's density to please an ailing Kaiser
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

The wisdom of an expert is usually a laughing matter on the witness stand.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

Boss Cox has gained control of Gin cinnati to the great discontinue of MT. Taft.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

MT Cleveland is content to hunt rab- bits and let the incumbent hunt the bears.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16
About Persons.

The Rev. Dr. Allen R. Moore, pastor of the First Christian church, returned to the city yesterday from Jasper, where he attended the state convention of the Christian church. The convention re- elected pr. Moore as president of the body. Dr. Moore served as the head of the state organization of Christian churches last year efficiently, and his unanimous election for another year is quite an honor.
 The Rev pr. c. w. Muckley of Kansas City. Mo-, and the Rev. Dr. J. A. Lord of Cincinnati are in the city, the guests of the Rev. Dr. Allen R. Moore, pastor of the First Christian church. Both Dr. Muckley and Dr. Lord are prominent ministers, and have charge of large churches in their respective cities. They will speak at the First Christian church tomorrow
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

Mercury Is swift little planet and not afraid of the sun.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

Hartman is no longer adviser-in- chief to the throne.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

Nashville Tennessean: Mrs. Carry Ma tion is good for crowd, live talk and oecasionally-a bunch of trouble.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16
PRESS POINTS

Atlanta Journal: Up to date MT Hearst has scored more defeats than MT. Bryan.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

Nashville Tennessean: Where to find Bourke Cochran is the eternal puzzle In our political game.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-11-16

Richmond Times-Dispateh: Now we suppose the estate of the Taft boom will try to lay the blame on the cost of living.
Bryan morning eagle. [volume] (Bryan, Tex.) 1898-1909, 1907-04-13
saAzos rRessvTtRy N SESSION.
nessiss Besss Yesterday Morning and
vu Csosisse Over Ssstsy -tlee-
,iss Of Officers Last Night.

The Brazos Presbytery is in ses-
sion at the handsome new Prrsby-
terian church in this city, with a
representative gathering OF minis
tiers and laymen present and en-
gagged earnestly in the worship and
work Of the Lord. The meeting
opened at the IL O'Clock service
yesterday morning, with a good
sized congregation, hut few dele
gates from a distance present,
Most Of these arrived by the after
noon trains of yesterday.
The morning service opened
with song. and with prayer by DR.
Mcfarland Of Navasota and Dr.
I. r. Belts Of this city. Rev. G
p. Storey OF Houston read a scrip
ture lesson from the fourteenth
chapter OF Acts and then spoke OF
the important subject assigned fol
the hour, IAN Effective System
of Missions the Only Cause of Rea
Growth to the Church" TIL,
subject wac well handled and fur
nished the predicate for mucl
Bryan morning eagle. [volume] (Bryan, Tex.) 1898-1909, 1907-04-13
MATINEE THIS AFTERNOON.

The management OF the high
class moving picture entertainment
at the opera house announces a
matinee performance this after
noon from 4 to 8 and regular per-
Torrance tonight from s to 10,
and will give four fine pictures at
each performance. The ladies and
children are especially urged to
take advantage OF the matinee. DIT
Bryan morning eagle. [volume] (Bryan, Tex.) 1898-1909, 1907-04-13
Believed oemented.

PittsburE. April i2--Frcderick STA
rel. the German arrested nj the en-
trance Of the Hotel Scheniey while
trying TO force his way In to sec An
drew Carnegie with reference to pat
eut which he said he wanted to dis
pose Of. was sent 90 jail for i've days
By Magistrate Walker az the Oakland
police station hearing. Siagel spent
Thursday night In q cell singing Ger
man religious songs. The police be-
iisve he n demented.
Bryan morning eagle. [volume] (Bryan, Tex.) 1898-1909, 1907-04-13
REVIVAL SERVICES CLOSE wEDNEs.
DAY MONT.
There Have Been Twenty.oae Additions
10 the Church TO Daie-Asuousce.
mems BY the Pastor

DR.. Risner preached yesterday
morning on The Highest Goal,
and last night on Turning to
God" Both were strong and in
spring sermons, clear and force
full. Following an appeal Tor
christian people TO witness tor the
Lord by standing, DIR. Risner did
some plain talking about those who
were so spiritually dead they
would no, even do this much.
Later at the close OF the service a
man stood up in the congregation
and said the expression struck HIM
and he wanted the prayers OF
christian people.
Service viii be held at the usual
hour this morning. with no service
tonight. DIR. Butler makes the
following announcements for Sun
day: Bible school at GAS n. IN.
DR.. Risuer will address the school
on Personal salvation DIR.
Risner will preach at II a. m. and
at 8 o. IN. b. Y. p. u. 7 p. m.
There was one addition to the
church last night by profession
and two by letter, making a total
OF twenty-one. The revival will
close "Wednesday night.
Bryan morning eagle. [volume] (Bryan, Tex.) 1898-1909, 1907-04-13
MET AND ADJOURNED UNTIL TUES.
DAY

The city council met in regular
session last night aud adjourned
until Tuesday afternoon at
O'Clock. No business was trans
acted.
Bryan morning eagle. [volume] (Bryan, Tex.) 1898-1909, 1907-04-13

profitable discussion at the after
! noon session.
Among the visiting preachers
and laymen are: DR.. w. 5. Ja-
cobs. Rev. G. p. Storey, Rev. G..
w. Storey, DR.. Ramsey, Rev. l..
y. Bradshaw, Rev. +. l.. Fincher,
Rev. ]. w. Sexton and George w.
I Norrell Of Houston; Rev. X. NJ.
Hall of Galveston; Rev. w. 5.
Red of Hampstead; +, 4. Bryan of
Giddings; Rev. l.. L. Selfridge of
Bay City; DR.. Mcfarland and 7.
NJ. Foley of Navasota; Rev. Thos.
Heckling of LAGRANGE; Rev. A.
s. Johnson of Huntsville: Rev.
Taylor of Calvert; J. A. Jones OF
Somerville.
Committees have assigned the
visitors TO homes and DIR. West,
the pastor, and a number of his
Official and other members are
looking closely after all the ar.
engagements for the meeting.
In addition to the general dis
cussior, at the afternoon meeting
Yesterday, OF the subject OF mis-
SONS presented al the morning ser
vice, another important topic was
introduced in an address by Rev.R.
NJ. Hall. who spoke on "A Con-
secrated Ministry in its Relation to
Church Efficiency" the discourse
being followed by general discus
sion.
DR.. Red, the moderator, preach
ed the communion sermon at s
lo'ciock last night. after which the
communion service was conducted
BY Rev. G. W. Storey.
The Presbytery was then consti-
ltuted. Rev. NJ. c. Taylor of Cal
vert was elected moderator. and
Rev. L. E. Selfridge of Bay City.
clerk.
l ANNOUNCEMENT.
Presbytery meets this morning
at s:4s. Preaching at II a. m. by
Rev. r r. Fincher.
Presbyterian Church-Sunday a,
II a. m, preaching by DR.. r. NJ.
Hall; 5 p. m, by Rev. A. 5. John
son. Monday at II a. m, by Rev.
f. NJ. Bradshaw; at 8 p. NJ, by
DR.. W. S. Jacobs.
A. and ". College-Sunday at
II a. n. by DR.. Mcfarland.
Methodist Church - Sunday al
ira. N. by Rev. Thomas Hick'
ling: p. N. by DR.. J. A. Ramsey
Christian Church Sunday at II
a. N. by Rev. L. E. Selfridge.
Bryan morning eagle. [volume] (Bryan, Tex.) 1898-1909, 1907-04-13
SHOT TO DEATH.

viii Clemens Pleads justification 80
the Cause.
Wharton. Tex. April i2.-A Lane
City Sam Grace was sho, and instantly
killed. An automatic pistol was the
weapon used. VIII Clemens pleads
Justification In an alleged affront to his
wife by the deceased. Both men were
Y,cs farmers living on adjoining farms.
Morris tribune., 1907-11-23
THE BEST TRAINING.

Somewhere in the west father has built
for his boys bungalow remote from the home
and in that bungalow they are to live and do all
the cooking washing and other work usually
done by woman's hands, They are to be their
own masters entirely free from home restraint
It is all done, we are told, that the toys may
learn self reliance and independence and to
take UP the responsibilities of life. Naturally
the arrangement pleases the boys greatly. They
are proud of their little republic and doubtless
will get lots Of experience
But we are not charmed with the plan. To
be it is good to be all round boy-to
know how to cook, sew, etc. as we'll as to be self
reliant But they have learned and still learn
these accomplishments just as we'll at home.
The one fatal defect in the plan, thought it NAV
not always reveal itself immediately, is the
withdrawal of the boy from the wholesome re-
straint of home life in formative and most cri-
tical period of his existence. There is nothing
that can equal the conserving influence of home
the gentle and refining presence of the mother
and the strong guidance of the father. The re-
verence, 6ial obedience and other virtues ac-
quired in the home circle are more valuable e
assets to possess when working out Iife's pro-
plems than anything that may be obtained by
playing at Robinson Crusoe or Swiss Family
Robinson.-Clinton Advocate
Morris tribune., 1907-11-23

President Roosevelt has forbidden his
appointees from taking any part in boosting
him for third term or from being delegate
to the national convention. IF third term is
to be forced the president, the demand
should come from the people and not from his
appointees.
Morris tribune., 1907-11-23

J. C. MORRISON. Editor and Publisher.
Morris tribune., 1907-11-23
SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 23, 1907.

The Starbuck Times remarks that there
certainly is scarcity of money now that we
can notice. Elevators buying grain and
banks are lending money as before. OF course
the recent scare a very good excuse
for not paying bills, but bluff of this kind is
pretty thin.
s
/ The liquor men of the state have started
counter campaign to the anti-saloon campaign
now being waged, and ask the next legislature
to change the hour of closing saloons from IL
s~o'clock to IL o'clock. The breweries and whole
sale liquor men have gotten together, and will
raise big campaign fund.
Washington State journal and Adams County news. [volume] (Ritzville, Wash.) 1906-1907, 1907-01-16

fly, I can't imagine how you did It.
Eth? What's that you saidr
"Nothin'," replied the little boy.
Perhaps that would be your wisest
course under certain circumstances"
remarked the old gentleman. IF you
were grown up and had nice flowing
whiskers and trunk railway hanging
out of your vest pocket and q news
paper reporter asked you how you got
it l wouldn't blame you for saying
nothing. OF course you might have Of.
Tended another little boy and he might
have hit you in the mouth and rolled
you In the mud. You did fight with
another little boy once, II you'll re-
member, but then you promised your
mother that you wouldn't do It again.
OF course IL You just let him hit you
and roll you in the mud It wasn't
strictly speaking, fighting"
"You bet didn't" said the little
boy. you ought to see him."
The nice old gentleman made a pc
culfar noise ending in a clearing of the
throat Then you broke your prom
ise," he said. That's very sad, John
ny. supposed that you would 60
through life meek and unresisting aft
er making that promise. Your dear
mother will be grieved. 1 shouldn't
wonder II you got what"
II couldn't help it," protested the
little boy with suspicion Of a within.
per. "He called me names and pushed
me n then I just pushed him little
am"
"And you didn't think about your
promise, ehT'
II thought about 1t at first"
"I'll tell you one thing, Johnny"
said the nice old gentleman. II neve,
break promise, never. You never
should, either. You want to be careful
how you make 'em. always say, I'll
do thus and so, II don't change my
mind or 4 won't do this or that I'M
less I feel different about 1t later on
That's the best way to make promises.
You remember that the next time your
mother wants you to promise her any
thing. Now, I think If we 60 into this
barber shop I can get the kind colored
gentleman to take most Of that mud
off and we can wash your face and
perhaps mother won't notice It."
II guess I'll tell her." said the lit
tie boy, bravely. "I'll tell her that I
broke my promise an I'm sorry, but I
won't do 1t again unless I change my
mind"
Johnny" said the old gentleman,
you're all right"
"If I don't Georgie's mother will
tell her, so it's all the same" said the
little boy.-Chicago Daily News.
Washington State journal and Adams County news. [volume] (Ritzville, Wash.) 1906-1907, 1907-01-16
ONE LANGUAGE FOR AL.

Il AsA0&Res More thaa onS Tongue
for the Wo,lds speech.
No living language can become to-
day the vehicle Of intercourse for the
whole civilized world, and 1t 10 absurd
to look Tor such a thing, says Nc
Clure's. The acceptance Of any Ian
guage, were it English or French or
Spanish, German or Dutch. Russian
or japanese. would Immediately not
only crush the pride Of the other ma
tons but would give to the favored
people such an enormous advantage in
the central Of the political world and
such unreasonable preference in the
worlds market that no healthy nation
would consent to 1t before its down.
fall.
For that reason the
chances were never worse; the spirit
Of strenuous yet friendly, rivalry be.
tween the nations in the markets of
the world was never more wide awake.
and the feeling Of national honor was
never purer and nobler. The more the
hopes for international arbitration be-
come realized, the more all nations of
the world become sincere friends; the
more they are eager and ought to be
eager to keep clear their own individu-
atty, together with their own rights
and duties, their own successes and
responsibilities. Andrew Carnegie's lib
crality NAV hr,ild paIaro in The
Hague In which a concert Of the most
enlightened nations speaks Justice
through its tribunal. But Andrew Car
negie has not the power to elevate his
simpfiied spelling board in Madison
avenue to the height of a tribunal far
superior to any Hague court: a trl.
bunal which shall decide that English
ought to become the one international
language, because the English-speaking
nations have 1.-THE most progressive civ
ilization."
Washington State journal and Adams County news. [volume] (Ritzville, Wash.) 1906-1907, 1907-01-16
1'''1ff e :

Tho nice old gentleman made a grab
behind the package mail box and
caught the little boy by the collar of
his REFER coat. you ought to have
got inside, Johnny. If you wanted to
hide from me-" he said. whats the
matter7 Did you think I wanted to
borrow money from your
mo, sir" replied the little boy.
hanging his head.
did ever tell you long stories ex-
cept at your earnest and insistent soil
citation"
mo, SIR"
Then why avoid mel" asked the old
gentleman, reproachfully. II didn't
think 1t Of you, Johnny. never
thought you would run and hide from
your fond old grandfather unless you
had been doing something that you
ought not to do and were ashamed to
look me In the face. It couldn't be
that, could itT
mo, sir" answered the little boy.
You're too we'll behaved for that,
aren't you? If you ever feel tempted
to do wrong you would say to your
self, oh. no. mustn't do that, as
shall be unable to look my kind grand
papa In the face without the blush Of
shame mantling my cheek wouldn't
you"
Eyes, SIR
II think hear you saying It." said
the nice old gentleman. whats all
this on your coat?"
Il got In the mud" stammered the
little boy.
II inferred as much. reasoned
that either you got in the mud or the
mud got on You. What did you get in
the mud for? Been reading a health
magazine article? Well, well! A nice
pickle you're in. What made your lip
swell, eh? Mosquito bit It? No? Well,
I thought 1t was a little late In the
season for mosquitoes. Maybe 1t was
humble bee. I know when was a
little boy and got stung by a humble
bee I'd put mud on the swelling. I
expect that was what you were doing
and you made mistake and daubed
up the back Of your coat instead of
your lip. People make funny mistakes
sometimes-even grow people. Still,
I don't quite understand, Johnny, why
you tried to hide from me-"
ut wasn't humble bee," volunteer
ed the little boy.
ut wasn't? Bless me! Well, II II
wasn't humble bee and you weren't
chopping kindling and you didn't fall
down and step on your lip or run into
lamp post or the edge Of a door or
60 to baseball game and stop a hot
Washington State journal and Adams County news. [volume] (Ritzville, Wash.) 1906-1907, 1907-01-16
Sa's':Shralrle<:


Some South African balloons ostra-
CHE the aged among them, refusing to
help or feed them whenever they are
unable to do anything for themselves.
When hyenas plague lions by steal
ing pieces of the prey. the lion will
throw chunks Of meat toward them at
shorter and shorter distances, until
they get within reach Of its paws and
are finished by blow.
In the Malay Archipelago Is a reptile
much like the mythical dragon. 1t has
false ribs that extend the loose skin
and form Its wings. There Is also a
frog with spreading feet that make a
parachute, which enables 1t to fit from
tree to tree, and a flying lemur that
can spread out Its whole body like an
umbrella and leap and fly a hundred
feet at time, from the top of one tree
to another.
At the "call Of the wild" recently a
st. Bernard dog in a Lake Superior
lumber camp Joined a wolf pack and
mated with one of their number. lie
used to come into camp for food; but
as his mate would never venture within
gun shot, he carried q part of his meal
out to her. A bull terrier attacked
him near the camp. and he was getting
the worst Of 1t when the she wolf ran
to his assistance, and between them
they nearly killed the terrier.
Washington State journal and Adams County news. [volume] (Ritzville, Wash.) 1906-1907, 1907-01-16
Safe. Sure and Speedy.

No external remedy ever yet devised
has so fully and unquestionably met
these three prime conditions
as successfully as Allcock' g
Plasters. They are safe be-
cause they contain no deleterious
drugs and are manufactured upon sci
tentific principals Of medicine. They
are sure because nothing goes into
them except ingredients which are ex-
actly adapted to the purposes for
which plaster is required. They are
speedy in their action because their
medicinal qualities 20 right to their
work Of relieving pain and restoring
the natural and healthy performance
Of the functions Of muscles, nerves and
skin.
Allcock's Plasters are the original
and genuine porous plasters and. like
most meritorious articles, have been
extensively initiated. therefore. always
make sure and get the genuine ALL
cocks,