The semi-weekly messenger., 1907-10-11

o. TIE CHIN.
better than any other tramp, but
am somewhat conservative by nature
1t is only when | am collared by the
police that I look naughty and fall
back upon my knickerbocker ancestry
and my blue blood, and if | get thirty
in the cooler l take it out in digni-
fed fashion instead of making
squeal-
/ was hanging about Philadelphia
few weeks ago to study the graft sys-
tenn and make more or less success
of my c. O. d. invention when one
evening as I was stroIling about |
meets up with a catosh young man.
could tell that he belonged to the
swagger set while he was yet block
away He had the proper air and his
hat on the back of his head. | sized
him uP for yOung man with a rlch
papa. GotiEg mother and mouth
for quail on toast and dry champagne
In doing business with the pubic
have Il little story TO relate. The story
is accompanied by a proper air of
hone lost forever, and it includes thir-
teen separate and distinct nlSfortunes
and a chunk of human ingratitude as
big as a house. 4 very few persons
hear the story and swear. The great
majority either preserve respectful
silence and tender me a nickel at its
conclusion or weep cOpiOusly and ten
der me advice about getting too near
tre cage Of the Bengal tiger when vis-
iting the ZOO. l might not have tackled
the catosh young man but for his per
turbed look. I saw that there had been
an epoch of some sort in his rosy life,
and | struck an attitude and began
chapter | OF my serial l hadn't got
off ten lines when he interrupted with:
STOW it, Gully. Where were you
born?"
Born In the Lap of Luxury.
"In the lap of luxury" says l, "but
at the early age Of ten trust squeezed
my old man out of bis tannery and
threw me on a cold world"
where's your palace CARP
"Switched off and left behind"
"And your valet?
Dropped dead the other day Of heart
disease when l handed him a quarter,
and I'm afraid / can't fill his place
II should say your allowance wasn't
over $500 a month he goes on as he
looks at the patches on my knees.
Its a tribe under that just at pres
ent," says l, "but I'm standing in with
q contractor to steal the curbstones on
ten different streets, and | may be
able to buy a third auto a month
hence"
Look here, Gully" says the catosb
young man as he drops his banter and
grows serious and breathes champagne
all over the block. II think l know
dilapidated gentleman when / see one.
I'D. G. tdilapidated gentleman) hits
me to a dot-soms dlapidation, some
gentleman. The two make a fair com
bine. Go ahead"
land you've got bicepsT
"Feel and see. Reaching out for
nickels for the last fifteen years has
given me the muscles of a Sandow.
Reaching is the best thing in the world
for shoulder exercise, even IL you don't
get anything.
And being 4 dilapidated gentleman
with biceps you ought TO know how to
put up your dukes"
In reply I put 'em up and tapped hiIa
| one, two. three, lightly on the chin
but at the same time kept an eye on
| q policeman across the street,
"Bevtiful," says the -catosh yon1G
man as | drops my hands Il belong
| to a S. s. s (swagger swell set club
down here, and Gaioot with lisp In
his mouth and not brains enough In
his head to fill a thimble smashed ne
In the nose with the gloves half an
hour ago and viii crow over IL fo-
] week / want revenge. bnt ! don