Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1907-01-02


the contagion of his merriment. Their
curiosity was not even aroused enough
to cause one Of them to turn round
and look at the fellow who was acting
so uproariously.
Il rambled on with my idiotic story
| OF the three-legged camel, the blind
| sheik. the hair-lipped dragoman and
the lost gourd until my friend at the
back of the room could laugh no
| longer. Thoroughly exhausted he
picked himself from the floor and,
painting and shobbing, he called out to
me:
oh, cheese IL, boss, for Gods sake.
cheese IL! IL you don't quit i shall
die. Come out and have a drink
I'm with you. sir l answered
Come up here, or meet me at the
back door
Il thank you. ladies and gentle
men, l said. addressing the rest OF my
audience. for your presence this eve
ming and for the enthusiastic recep-
ton you have given me. l wish you
a very good evening. and hope may
never set eyes on any of your faces
again so long as / live
That set my friend of into hyster-
les again; but by the time | had put
on my hat and coat and got down.
stairs / found him there waiting for
me-
Come on, come on he said. L
can't say word till I've drunk pint
OF beer
He led the way into a private room
m "A of hn
drinks and cigars. and then fell off
his chair in an ecstasy of uncontrolla-
bic mirth. At last, when he mad re-
covered and drank off a big shopper
of beer. he turned TO me and asked:
Who in blazes did you think you
were talking to to-night?'
1 was talking to 500 OF the most
| insensate blockheads that ever were
gathered together under one roof on
the continent of North America, / re-
piled
Yes. but what body was it that
you were addressing?'
II was addressing the members of
the Literary and Historical associa-
ton of Doleville,' was my reply.
All. ah. ah. oh, Lord! But 1t was
funny! 1t was too funny for anything
Who took you into that hall?'
I described to him the young man
who had met me at the station and
driven me TO the place.
Yes, yes-couldn't have been any
body else. / know him. 1t was Char
lie Swift, the greatest practical Joker
in Doleville. He must have got some
body to take the other fellow to the
other hall. Funniest thing / ever saw
in my life
What was 1t that was so awfully
funny | asked. My entertainment?
Yes, sir-eXactly; your entertain
ment! Your standing up in that hall
for an hour and a half, telling funny
stories to the state convention OF deaf
mutes!'
Deaf mutes,' repeated-'deaf
mutes! DO you mean to tell me. sir.
that my audience was composed Of
deaf mutes?'
Every man and woman in the
whole bunch. except myself my
friend replied. You see. he contin.
ued, you were billed to appear at the
odd Fellows hall, and instead of that
you went to the Handel hall. 7 was
at the other place, where a thousand
people assembled to hear you.
a man came on the platform and
began opening and closing his mouth
without saying word-without utter.
ing sound of any kind. At first the
people roared. They thought IT was
some odd within Of bumor that had got
hold OF you. But after about ten min
utes Of it some of them began to pro
Test
Here quit that mummery and tell
us something FUNNY one man called
out
But still the man on the platform
went on-moving his lips and not
making a sound.
Stop your mounting and talk Eng
fish! Fake Humbugl' Give us our
money back
Finally about a score OF the hot
test-headed fellows made a rush for
the platform. The lecturer saw they
meant business and bolted. He got
away through a back door and is
probably ont OF town by now
He was the fellow that was to
have given an address to your audi
ence I'm the new lip language that is
expected TO supersede the old system
Of manual signs with deaf mutes 7
thought ! would come around to the
Handel hall and see what was going
on. thought there might be some
fun. But ] never dreamed OF finding
YOU reciting Twinkle. twinkle. little
star" 10 500 deaf mutes.'"
Copyright. 1906. by Daily Story Pub. COZ
In Eagle Eye.
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