davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05

lions for state teachers certificates
Frederick E. Balton, professor OF edu-
cation at the state university. who is
one Of the leaders in support of the
measure, in arguing for the bill said:
Il believe that this is a very much
needed measure in Iowa. At the pre-
sent time 80 states in the Union nc
credit collegiate and normal school
work toward state teachers certif1-
Gates. Iowa is in the class with
Georgia, Florida and the southern
states in the main. A bill known as
the Turner bill has already passed
both houses. This pill empowers the
state board of educational examiners
to recognize state certificates from
other states. AS matter of fact the
great majority Of all certificates issued
IN other states are issued through re
cognition of graduation from some
higher institution If our board of
examiners recognizes such certificates
and do not recognize those of Iowa
institutions it will be an exceedingly
unjust discrimination against our own
institutions. believe in the Turner
bill, but also believe that the Stookey
bill should be passed The passage of
tuese two bills would do much for edit
cation in Iowa. Iowa legislation has
done much to drive away and keep
out of Iowa the best class of teachers.
Many young men and women intend
ing to teach go to schools in Wis
consin, Minnesota, Missouri and Neb-
raska, because at the end of their col
lege or normal school courses, they
can secure state certificates to teach.
Iowa grants no such recognition.
The legislators share with the citi-
zens of the state the pride of Iowa's
schools and If Iowa legislation has
done anything to drive away and keep
out of Iowa the best class of teach
ers," as Mr.. Bolton asserts, it was evil
IDENTIFY unintentional as the haste of
the legislative committee to correct
the deficiency when it was pointed ont
is proof,
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05
THEN AND NOW.

BY Wex Jones in the Chicago Ex-
aminer.
THEN Scene: Papa Washington's
Orchard
Papa Washington-Oh. gee! Some
body's chopped down my best cherry
tree.
George w Boo hoo!
Papa W.-George, who did this?
George W.-(expanding his chest
and trying to look like Lawyer Del
mas-Father, cannot tell lie. / did
it with my little hathet.
Papa Whaling George by the earl
Come. my boy.
Exeunt toward woodshed.
NOW.-Scene: Papa Washington's
Orchard.
Papa Why tree! Ny tree! It was
George or the Cherry Trust that di'
this. George. who did this?
George WI refuse to answer with
out consulting counsel.
Papa W.-Very well. In the mean
time will obtain an Injunction re.
straining you from chopping down any
more Of my trees.
Scene 2 A Courtroom.
1A.ooi ASy Tau you ever seen the
cherry tree before the day of the oc-
currence?
George W.-Yes.
Attorney.-Describe what happened.
George VT dropped a cherry ON
my head. (sensation)
Attorney.--Do you remember the
32d day Of last January.
George W.-Yes.
Attorney. What happened on that
day?
George Why cat ate my canary.
Attorney.-And then?
George WI chased the cat with a
broom.
Attorney. The prosecuting attorney
may take the witness.
Prosecutor (sneeringly)-Cross ex-
animation not necessary.
Attorney Gentlemen Of the jury, as
! look upon your intelligent faces / can
see that with your unfailing acumen
you have grasped the force Of this de.
PENDANTS statements, statements which
the prosecution recognizes cannot be
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05
THE HORRORS OF PLAYING SOL
DER.

From the Rochester Democrat and
Chronicle.-The sound old doctrine
that child born in a stable must Of
necessity grow up to be horse has
been reaffirmed and elaborated by the
psychologists of the kindergarten to
an extent that would have made the
ancients stare. A Boston woman scien.
fist has made the discovery that the
reason the nations still go to war
and will not beat their spears into
pruning hooks is because little boys
are permitted to play with toy sol
diers.
This distinguished lady told an au.
dience of horror-stricken mothers in
Chicago that they must never permit
their children to play at war with tin
soldiers and toy cannon. why
should you permit the boy who you
hope will become fine and gentle
man to pretend that he Is killing peo-
pie and to cut down whole platoons
DO not, beg of YOU" she cried, "let
the children mimic this CHASTITY bust
ness of violent DEATH .
The atmosphere is already heavy
with rules on the subject of play.
Mother Goose and Santa Claus have
been banished. The toy soldier is now
in disgrace. Who xnows where the
blow will fall next? The slaughter
that once took place in the nursery Is
appalling. Youngsters whetted their
appetites on stories like Jack the
Giant Killer anu Little Red Riding
Hood and fairly waded in gore. Such
license was, Of course, very wrong and
cannot be too strongly condemned.
We trust there are no adults weak
enough to sigh over the changes that
have been wrought and feel pang of
regret for the rubbish that has been
swept away by the march c. progress.
The care and thought, now bestowed
on little Reginald cannot fail to make
him better boy than his father.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05
NO PLACE FOR MOLLY GOODIES.

Kansas City Journal.--It was a
somewhat amusing and disconcerting
coincidence when President Roosevelt
visited Harvard university and cor1n-
seled the students to engage in the
very sports they had been urged the
day before by President Eliot to ayoil.
Probably President Roosevelt was un.
aware of the position assumed by the
head of the university, for it is incon-
cetvable that he should have exhibit
ed the bad taste to advise disobed-
fence on the part of the students.
President Eliot as Is well known, is a
mild and gentle college man, who OBJ
jects to football, basketball, hockey
and many other sports, on the grounds
Of their alleged brutality. He has i'm
pressed upon the great institution
over which he presiies that he is op-
posed to rough sports. To have the
energetic and impulsive president of
the nation come along and tell the
students to go in for all the prosclib-
ed games was embarrassing, to say
the least.
In spite of the general crusade
against football and kindred sports
there is every Indication that they will
survive during the coming year. al
though the students themselves are
trying to eliminate the brutal features.
But brutality is not the proper word in
discussing most of the intercollegiate
athletic contests in this country.
Rough as these contests are, 1t NAV
be said to the everlasting credit of
young Americans that the instances
of intentional injury to players are
rare.
Among the possible employments Of
Mr.. Roosevelt after his term as presi-
dent expires it has been suggested
that he become president Of Har.
ward university. Just what will be
done with President Eliot is not
stated. Interest lies in the fact that
Mr.. Roosevelt is an ardent champion
OF all sorts of college sports and athls-
tics, from glove contests to tennis,
and that unless he changes his mind
any college that he would preside over
would be wide open" on the sport
question. He said the other day that
he did not want to see Harvard or any
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05
THE MAN WHO WINS.

The man who wins is the man who
works,
The man who tolls while the next man
shirks;
The man who stands in his deep dis
tress
With his head held high in the dead.
ly press
Yes. he is the man who wins.
The man who wins is the man who
knows,
The value Of pain and the worth Of
woes
Who lesson learns from the man
sswho fails.
And moral finds in his mournful
walls;
Yes, he is the man who wins.
The man who wins is the man who
stays
In the unsought paths and the rocky
ways.
And perhaps, who fingers now Ind
then,
To help some failure to rise again.
All, he is the man who wins!
And the man who wins is the man
who hears
The curse Of the envious in his ears
But who goes his way with his lead
held high,
And passes the wrecks Of the failures
For he is the man who wins.
Baltimore News.
I
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05
MISSOURI.

New York Mail.-It is missouri
with the two "i's" short and no faint
OF q" sound in the doubled "s' The
legislature of the state has settled the
pronunciation by law, and a good Job
1t is, since comedians have used "Miz-
zourah'' on the stage and even the
Standard Dictionary gives the word
"Mizzouri"
Other states might adopt this course.
Arkansas has done SO; the correct pro-
nunciation is "Ark-an-saw" 1t will
probably take statute to convince
eastern people that the "o'' is long in
both the first and third syllables of
Oklahoma" and that "Iowah'' and not
Iowa" or "Ioway,' is the home Of the
Cummins tariff theory; that MARY
land is not pronounced as 1t is spelled
and that Tennessee" is not accented
on the first syllable.
All the state names that have a Lat.
in or Spanish origin are commonly
mispronounced in the east, and upon
dictionary authority "Montahna," me.
vahda' and "Colorahdo' are the best
local usage and should be recognized.
In the east the "a is given as in'fare.' y
Alabama" though an Indian word,
suffers the same misusage. Called
Alabama" by cultured residents, its
musical syllables are elsewhere paro-
died in something like "Allybammy.
Indiana" might be pronounced with
either the far" or fare" sound of the
first "a but surely 1t is not Injianny.' .
Both "Illinoy" and "Illinoise" are al
lowed by the dictionaries. The orig
inal word was, pronounced "Illiniwah''
on tongues have here decisively re-
French suffix "ois,'' but the Angio-Sax.
on tongues have here deciseively re.
jected the French pronunciation.
Perhaps half the states could to ad-
vantage fix the best present usage of
name pronunciation. Even in New
York" for instance. is it or is 1t not
correct to "iotize" the vowel in
"New?' The dictionaries say yes, but
more than half the people Of the state,
including practically all of Continental
extraction, fail to obey.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05
WHAT is EXPECTED OF THE IOWA
HEN.

Chicago Inter-Ocean.-Egg legisla-
tion in Iowa is more comprehensive
than that Of Wisconsin, for the reason,
probably, that the Iowa hen is consid-
cred more intelligent than the cheese
state hen. The original hen bill,- as
presented to the Wisconsin legislature,
merely provided that the eggs be dat
ed"
To the judicial minds in the Wiscon-
sin lawmaking body this provision was
wholly inadequate. 1t was not stated
by whom the eggs were to be dated
whether by the owner of the hen, or
the man who bought the eggs, or the
managers Of the cold storage plant.
With these defects the bill naturally
failed to arouse interest.
The Iowa legislature Is more ex-
plicit. as we gather from the bill intro
duced by Senator Gale of Mason City.
This bill seems to cover egg legislation
so thoroughly that it may we'll be con-
sidered model for other legislative
bodies of the middle west aud In con-
sequence Is reproduced entire. as fol
lows, to-wit:
Whereas, the hen-the Hawkeys hen
Is never quite certain just when
The fruit which she deposits daily
Will be displayed by grocer gayly.
In basket box, or pasteboard mech.
And duly labeled Eggs, all fresh
When, as fact. beyond dispute
Those oblong spheres of white she,ied
fruit
May tottering and palsied be,
OF the vintage of eighteen nineey-
three.
Or other date SO far. remote,
1t were a shame the tile to quote.
Now, therefore, be enacted today,
BY the legislature al .oway,
That it shall stand as law an, fact.
From the time and passage of this act,
SO all may know. both guest and host,
When an ORDERS served of eggs on
toast"
Said eggs are fresh and not arrayed
In aroma for block displayed;
That. man may know they're unde-
When he gets them scrambled or hard
biled;"
Or. when in omelet they are tried,
He does not feast on last years dregs,
But is right sure his eggs are eggs.
That every hen, from Lyon to Lee,
From Adams over to Allamakee.
From Woodbury., Sioux and Muscatile,
From Ida, Sac, and Polk and Greene,
And counties up and over and through.
And down the state adjacent to.
Shall be required and compelled
Whenever an egg is newly shelled.
To place thereon in numerals great
Day, month and year, the faithful date
When she in barn, or straw or hay.
Had thus sent forth her righteous lay.
In order, also, be 1t declared
That she may always be prepared.
Each hen shall have market tried,
BY executive council supplied;
So as she struts and clucks in glee.
She'll stamp each egg so eggzactly
That all may know Except on stage)
To day and hour, its legal age;
And any dealer found so bold
To offer one moren six weeks old
Shall in the hay be forced to tramp
And wear himself tue rubber stamp,
It is probable that egg legislation will
rest here, unless jealousy develops in
the Missouri legislature and it shows
a desire to go Iowa one better. 1t
couldn't do worse.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05
ENGLIsHMAN AND YANKEE joke.

Judges Library.-I have often heard
that an Englishman couldn't under.
stand an American joke, but never ,ln-
TIL the other day did hear this states
ment proved. A short time ago hap
pened to become acquainted with him.
He Is jolly and likes to hear jokes and
stories. and recited this:
There was an old lady in Wooster,
Who had an old gray-headed rooster:
The old rooster died,
The lady she cried.
Cause she don't get the eggs that sho
'uster."
The Englishman, looked solemn for
moment and then, cycling me sharp
ly, said:
Well. but look (h)ere, that is impos-
sible, for the old lady chad no
h)ens!"
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05
THE NILE AND THE SPHINX.

i Puck old Nile sat up in his he'd,
and rubbed his eyes. No, he was not
mistaken. A party OF men wern M
deed drawing near. They were Eng
ltshmen. Anyway, they wore hats
like Stanley, Africanus and appeared
to imagine they owned the earth.
Moreover they We're engineers, other
wise they wouldn't be squirting
through those brass telescopes in the
way.
Well, I'll be damned" snortef the
Father OF Waters.
It's about time, too!' growlel the
Sphinx, for he was heartily tired of
the rivers moods.
And according to all accounts they
haven't spoken since.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05
CUBAN TEMPER NEEDS A PADDLE

Chicago Chronicle The threat 81
certain Cuban patriots to wage war
against the United States is not
mere joke, because it signifies the
temper of considerable element, IN
the Cuban population. These persons
hate the United States as badly as
they hated Spain and they hate any
Cuban government as badly as they
hate the United States The anti
American movement is a phase Of a
sentiment which Is against all govern
ment. This sentiment will have to he
dealt with some day.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05
PRoNouNciNe THE STATES.


Des Moines Register and Leader
The Iowa legislature might take a
tip from the Arkansas and Missouri
legislatures and proclaim an official
pronunciation of the name of the state.
At present it is a pure case of per.
sonal choice,-between Io-way, with
the accent on the second syllable; or
half dozen other ways. A Wash
ington correspondent recently declar.
ed that virtually no two members of
the states delegation pronounced the
name of the state alike.
A few years ago the Arkansas 1egis-
lature got together and officially de-
termined that "sas" spells "saw," so
that ARKANSAS" with the accent on
the second syllable, became "Ark-an-
saw" with the accent on the first syl.
liable. According to this reasoning
Kansas would be pronounced as
though it were spelled Kansaw, but
states rights prevail in pronouncia-
ton, if nothing else.
Now it is Missouri which has official
ly settled this vexed question. When
Gus Thomas wrote drama of the
state he called it "In lMizzoura," and
ninety-nine out of every hundred peo-
pie who reside in the state use the
Gus Thomas pronunciation But the
Legislature thinks otherwise 1t wants
no II" pronunciation for its "s";; it
does not even care to have the face
tiously inclined speak the name as
though it were Misery. The official
pronunciamento on the subject is pre-
sented herewith:
The only true pronunciation of the
name of the state, in the opinion of
this body, is that received from the
native Indians, and that it should be
pronounced in three syllables, accent
on the second syllable. The vowel in
the first syllable is short "i'';; in the
second syllable long double ''o' or
100; in the third short 81; IS" in
the two syllables in which it occurs
has the sound Of S." and not ~"
To simplify matters, we respectfully
suggest a new arrangement of sylla-
bles. Instead Of Missouri, with its
doubt, why not Miss Ouri? Simplified
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05
CONCERNING "TAlNTEDy NEWS

CONCERNING "TAiNTED" NEWS.
Much has been said in the Iowa
press in commenting on the recent ex-
pose in Golfers wherein a list of
Iowa papers, In which the Courier
was included, was mentioned as being
among the publications furnished
with free Washington correspondence
from the William Wolff Smith agency.
The Inference is given out in the com
ment by Iowa papers that the papers
receiving this service took advantage
Of 1t because 1t was furnished free,
and willingly published the articles ex-
plotting private enterprises represent
ed by Mr., Smith, few paragraphs
fof which matter appear in every letter
according to Golfers, in order that
the paper might make showing as
having Washington correspondent.
How true this is Of other papers in
the state the Courier is unable to
state, but one thing is certain. The
Courier never made any arrangement
with William Wolff Smith to receive
his service. The Smith corresppn-
dence has been coming to the Office
just as much other correspondence
comes to the office from private news
bureaus. many of them maintained at
expense by the private interests they
further, but almost invariably they
have gone into the waste basket. with
other matter the Courier has no use
for. When any of this sort of matter
was used it was used because some
thing was contained in it that was not
furnished by the Associated Press or
by the COurier'S other news sources
and yet was of sufficient news value
to Courier readers as to warrant it's
publication.
The Courier is not compelled to ac-
cept free service in order to secure a
Washington letter" as this paper has
its own regular paid correspondent in
Washington who furnishes under his
signature articles commenting on ma
tional legislation daily.
The entire matter should have been
ignored by the Courier but for the
fact that some Iowa papers seek to
make capital of it.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05
it were; with the cork hermetically


sealed.
Now while business conditions are
favorable and prosperity prevails, is
-eminently the time to project and
build interurban lines The question
of interurban railway lines is the most
important for the consideration of the
business men of Ottumwa. Here is
something for the new Ottumwa Com
mercial association to work on and ac-
complish effective results, The Com.
mercial association is not yet fully
launched, but hopes to complete its or
ganizatlon at an early date. Some
business men in this city are standing
sadly in their own light by withhold
Ing the enthusiastic support and coop
Grafton with the proposed work of the
association that it should have.
To be very frank and blunt about the
matter. the question now before the
business men of Ottumwa is this: Is
Ottumwa going to be live one" or
dead one during the year 1907? Is
the Commercial association going to
have the enthusiastic support and CO.
operation Of the business men of this
city? Are we going to try to do some
thing or are we going to stand still,
which inevitably means to go back
ward?. Mr.. Bushes Man of Ottumwa
what are you personally going to do
to help build up Ottumwa as an indus
tiial center, and by the building Of in
terurban railways to make it the COM
mercial metropolis of southern Iowa?
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05

other college turn out any molly cod
dies We do not know just what
molly coddles" are, but 1t is safe to
assume that they are physical weak
lings. 1t is a safe gamble, that when
President Roosevelt takes hold OF Har-
ward. If he yer does there won't be
molly coddle" within mile of the
campus. When the red blooded chief
executive turns his attention to manly
sports it is high time for the molly
coddlerso to retire to the nursery.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05
UNCLE SAM AS A PUDDING.

Cincinnati ENQUIRER. Congress mas
not only increased its salary SO per
cent. but 1t is putting UP luxurious Of.
fee buildings for itself at public ex-
pense. II the clerks, now exceeding
ly well paid, get the increase they are
clamoring for, they will probably want
mahogany desks and stuffed swing
chains. The prevailing idea in Wash
ington is that the government is a
"cinch" or a pudding"
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05
EDUCATORS In LOBBY.

The educational forces of Iowa show
ed their strength in securing a favor
able report on the Stookey bill by the
Iowa senate The school people were
almost a unit in endorsing the bill,
which seeks to secure power to the
state board of educational examiners
to accept graduation from regular and
collegiate courses of higher institu-
lions Of learning in lieu OF exam1na,
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05
A SPADES A SPADE in TEXAS.

- SVNGE - 0GA0C I'm IEAAS,
Down in Texas there is a prevailing
habit of calling a spade a spade,
which Is not cast aside by Texas
even when they rise to the dignity Of
legislators. An instance Of this was
seen in the upper house of the legis-
lature when In reply to Senator
Bailey's bitter denunciation of his
enemies for their efforts to GUST him
from his seat, several of the senators
used language that the Ladies' Home
Journal would not think of printing. s.
3. G. Gaines of Comanche county, WAC
has been very violent in his opposition
to Bailey, grew eloquent in his denua-
citation and charged that friends of the
senator chad strained their servile
muscles to pull the senatorial chariot
over the PROSTATE honor of Texas. !"
When he had finished speaking Love
OF Williamson county, in a rage, shout
ed:
The gentleman from Comanche is
a liar, and dare him to rise in his
seat and deny it."
The gentleman from Comanche re-
NAMED in his seat.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05

played ball or went fishing in the aft
'ernoon. Even SO good a soldier as the
lamented Dave Henderson was. accus-
ed of going fishing on Memorial after
noon but am sure that none Of his
old comrades thought any the less OF
him for doing SO.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05
Professional Cards.

In this cut the second
lumbar vertebra OF
the backbone is in
proper relation with
the first but not with
the .hird; therefore
he great trunk nerve
is free as it paeses
rom the spinal cord
hrough the first open
ing but seyetly pinch
ed in the second. The
Chiropractor can IN
stantty adjust spine
No. 9, making the
second opening a 9
large as the first, thus
removing pre- SIS II re
~ Il - ~
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05

spelling or not then, the world would
know how at least one sister state
should be hailed
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05

~ fTOm ING nervcSsWH
then can nature restore you. See cHAS.
RAY PARKER, D. c.. Baker Building, 1870
10 6:a0p. m.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05
DENTISTS.

DR.. TuLLIs.
~ Dentist.
Artificial teeth scientifically con-
structed
Crown and bridge-work expert.
Office over Cullens dry goods store
Main street, Ottumwa. Iowa.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1907-03-05
PHYSICIANS AND SURGEONS.
DR.. A o. WiLLIAMs.

Surgeon 6. 5. \ : n'y g.
3 Residence, 218 North Jefferson street.
Office, 100 Court street. Residence tele-
phoNe 10; office telephone 80. ottumwa.