Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1907-06-28

The husband a-lo never goes out de-
serves a wife who never stays in.-The
Cynic.
"Is Willie still paying attention to
Tillie?" NO" Did he jllt her?'
mo, he married her!"-Punch.
"Anna, you wished to buy a diction-
ary7" 81 have married a professor
Observation-Disclosures Blaetter.
Look, Arthur. that is IL baby"
"How do you know 81 recognize
the back of our nurse."-Der Wahre
Jacob.
Madge-Has she a good memory?
Marjorie-So-so. She's always remem-
bering things she's forgotten.-Town
Topics.
She-You can always tell a Harvard
man. He (from New uayen)-Yes;
but you can't tell him much.-Harper's
Weekly.
Mater-What is it, pa: Has Henry
Deer expelled? Pater-WOrse! He
writes that he's going to take a female
part in the college pIay.-Puck.
as her husband so uncndurably stu
pid?'' "Oh. dreadful. The only time
he brightens up is when she talks Of
divorce !"-Seattle Post-Intelligencer.
Harker-Slowboy is all right, when
It comes TO looking ahead. Parker
Yes; but he's all wrong when it comes
to going ahcad.-Chicago Daily News.
The society reporters always speak
of a bride being led to the altar" just
as though a bride couldn't fnd her way
there NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. Ledger.
81 hear you are having trouble in
meeting your creditors "Troublo 10
meeting 'em? Great Sect. Ny trou-
BILE is lodging 'em."-Cleveland Leader.
Politician-Bcrore you send in your
report of this interview l want to see
it. .Reporter-Impossible! l sent it in
half an hour before / interviewed you:
Life.
S~apleigh-T'm learning to play the
aw-harp, doncher know. Miss Caus-
tique-Indeed! Has your physician
given up all s?-Chicago Daily
News.
Pardon me, sir, but isn't there an
other artist in this building" Artist
We'll, that is a matter of opinion.
There is another fellow who paints
The Model.
"AIy mistress isn't at home, ma'am-'
"Please tell her when l saw her peep
ing from the front window as I came
up. felt so afraid she was."-Balti-
more American.
,Judge-Prisoner, nave you anything
to say to the court before sentence is
pronounced? Prisoner beg the court
to consider the youth of my attorney
White and Black.
"When your mother-in-law fell into
the water, why didn't you help to get
her out?' "My lear madam, you must
know that nothing I've ever done has
pleased her.'-Judy.
Mabel (shocked with the recollection
Of it)-Isn't Edith's new hat just a hor-
rid fright? Ethel Gas if receiving con-
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES it? 1 helped her
select it.-Browning's Magazine.
First Reporter see by the last ed!-
ton that our old schoolmate, Jones,
has committed suicide. Second Re
porter-Hurry down and you may be
In line to prevent his doing it.-Smart
Set.
Money doesn't always bring happi-
ness and peace Of mind" "1ou are
right there" answered the man with
an anxious look. "Sometimes 1T temptS
you to buy automobiles. '-Washingtou
Star.
There are nervous women; there are
hyper-nervous women. But women SO
nervous that the continual rustic of 4
silk skirt makes them nervous-no,
there are no women so nervous as that!
-Fliegende Blaetter.
Man Ito a friend)-I am done with
doctors henceforth! N of them ad-
vised me to sleep with my windows
open. did so, and the very next
morning my gold watch was gone from
the bureau.-Fliegende Blaetter.
"Why have you taken your son out
of school without permission?" Father
Ca grocer)-But they were running
him; l wish to bring him up to carry
on my business, and they were teaching
him that there are sixteen ounces in q
pound.-Il Motto per Ridere.