The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1907-05-30
AISDREAM DIARY

much of dreamer" is the way the
subject was introduced. This followed:
Some people say they never dream.
Whether they are to be envied is a
question. If one could push button
and have a dream brought on when
ever desired a vision in sleep, dreams
might become Injuries; but as long as
dreams continue to come and go as
they do, or as mine do, me for a
dreamless sleep.
1T Is a mistake to suppose dreams
necessarily come from late rarehts,
liquid connections and poorly ventilat-
ed rooms. The most hideous night
mares in my recollection galoped over
me after / had remained in my room
all evening reading delicious poetry,
and after a dinner of nothing but sea
sonable fruit; after l had taken the
precaution to have the atmosphere OF
my room at hospital temperature and
after l had had day unalloyed from
care.
"a long time ago l began keeping
a record of dreams. | added after each
my mental and physical condition at
the time | went to bed. In looking
over this dream diary however, l can
form no deductions.
There is no connection between
any dream and my business or condi-
ton. | have committed crimes in
my sleep as atrocious as any of which
| have read after day and evening
spent in the most delightful surround
ings, and this when l was in prime
condition.
Il have written plays, poems and
books which entranced multitudes who
saw and read, and which brought me
honor and wealth. All in my sleep!
| never attempted either in my waking
hours.
These sleep visions have come to
me after the day was crowded with
anxiety and unsolved problems and
after | had gone to bed racked with
pain. A very learned person to whom
| stated the case said it was natures
recompense, or something of that sort.
THE most charitable deed | ever
did, the one which made me feel that |
had won a harp and a halo, was re-
warded in sleep by brutal attack
upon my beneficiary which would have
justified the community in lynching
me.
Il had a friend in the fullest sense
of the word If there ever was man
for whom | would have laid down my
life it was this friend. He sickened
and died. / attended him in his Attic
ton, took charge of the funeral and
was the sincerest mourner at his bier.
The very night of the day on which
he was buried | went in my sleep to
his grave, resurrected his body, car
ried it to a dissecting-room, sold 1t
and danced gleefufy as | saw it mutt
lated and cut into fragments. Then
with the money | had received | gave
a banquet to the men who had paid
me for my ghoulish work.
This mean diary of mine is filled
with train robberies, acts of incendiar-
ism, stranglings and other diabolical
acts.
Never shall | forget night that
followed a day in which | had been
with the rector of my church in a mis-
sion of mercy. | had laid aside my
business to help.
That night, in my sleep, you under
stand, was summoned to Rome,
~ rpucnlf n tho
who informed me that | was to take
the place Of Merry del Val.
Il don't know how long | had held
the job, but the pope sent for me one
night and told me that he wanted me
to remove the bodies Of all the dead
popes in ST. Peters and have them
thrown into the Tiber. A big job, but
took it,
When | reported that the work had
been done the pope informed me that
he was tired of his place and wanted
to go back to Venice He put it up to
me to destroy the Vatican and give
him safe conduct to the city of the
Dagoes. You wouldn't expect me to
20 lntO lle "DETAILS Vi lHlS ldSh.
don't know that there were any details;
only know that the breaking up of
the church of Rome was accomplished.
when | had landed the latest sue
cessor of st. Peter as he had asked,
he rewarded me with an appointment.
What do you think it was? He made
me commissioner of the Grand canal
with power to boss every gondola in
the waters The dream ended there.
After these few quotations from my
dream diary it is due to say that in
everyday life | am conservative;
am not addicted to any vice. am not
a gourmet. / never use drugs.
II am just a plain, ordinary man,
harmless and devoid of any ambition
other than taht of living at peace with
all men. have no excessive curiosity,
other than to know from anybody who
thinks he can tell why my nights are
murdered with the weirdest dreams
that ever came down the pike"