The Washington herald., 1907-01-28


A Florida Congressman has introduced
a bill 90 sell The Philippines al cost As
nothing is said about trading stamps. the
proposition VIII probably attract no at
teution-
Gov. Swettenham is certainly being
vouchsafed abundant opportunity To see
himself as others see him.
New Hampshire summer boarding house
keepers are said 20 have taken In over
100000 last year. not counting the board
ers who were also taken in
Senator Carmack says: President
Roosevelt has kidnapped the Democratic
platform. It is very seldom that you
catch the President kidnapping.
There are 20S separate characters in the
AbysSinian alphabet This is enough TO
tempt Mr. Carnegie to buy up Abyssinia
and rub it of the map.
According TO the verdict OF German bal
lots, Emperor William may continue 10
make * hot for the Hottent0t
That scientist who thinks earthquakes
benefcent forces Of nature must look
upon them as sort Of massage treat
ment.
Sir William CrookeS says ne has per
fected a plan whereby nitric acid may be
extracted from the air. So far as we are
concerned, he is perfectly welcome TO our
share of the acid.
A New Jersey bride Of ten days had
her husband arrested because he made
fun OF her CoOkiug." Senator Tillman
might have told him that nothing Is
more dangerous to an amateur humorist
than handing out remarks seriously
thought to De funny. esFecially 10 an un-
certain audience.
Little Rhode Island is too small to en-
terrain the entire limelight with her little
Senatorial deadlock. The spot light will
be about all we can spare for Rhody.
With Col Colt Of revolver fame. and
Col. Du Pont of powder fame. in the
Senate. still further explosions may be
looked for.
Little Delaware. having repudiated
Addicks and shaken itself clear OF Alice.
resumes its place i'm the Union as Il self
governing State. and Delawareans may go
about once more holding up their heads
and looking unabashed into the eyes OF
their fellow-countrymen." remarks the
Philadelphia Record gravely. and as the
pot would remark to the kettle
However. the Boston gentleman who
declares he never told a lie in his life
need not imagine that that. necessarily,
bars him from the Ananias Club.
About half century from now the
Oldest living policy holder will be ex-
planning how he remembers when the
counting Of the ballots began.
One OF the greatest problems confront
ing this country is how 20 keep the fur
mace going in winter and the ice from go
ing IN summer.
The Buffalo Express may be right in
saying that Secretary Root is the great
mixer Of the administration, and yet it
must be acknowledged that Mr.. Loeb has
had to shoulder the responsibility of n
goodly share of the mix-ups.
Engineer shonts evidently missed his
calling. He should be serving in the dip
lomatic corps.
Senetor-elect Bob" Taylor is already
pretty nearly ex-eveTything that Tonnes
see had go offer. except extinguished
If Gov. Swettenhams ears are burning
which is entirely probable it must seem
somewhat like a conflagration
----------------=-
The Texas legislature has Iengtbily re
solved that any one who offers the
opinion that it was derelict i'm its DUTY
to the people when it reelected Senator
Bailey without investigating the charges
against him beforehand states that
which is false. Infamous. and malicious.
In fact the legislature seems 90 have
grabbed a handful Of bouquets and
jumped right into the middle of it's own
whitewash bucket
1t seems that Uncle Sam can place
l3.CC0,000 soldiers in the field whenever he
wants to, and every mothers son of them
ready and willing to lick the stuffing out
OF creation-but purely in the interest Of
International peace.