The independent., 1907-01-31
How Colonel GulliVer and His Wife Stacked Up.

They decided to fuss around and see
II they could not attI ct the attention
of the Big Guns.
BY carefully pulling the Wires, the
Hon. Gulliver had himself named as
member of the Committee on Extinct
Fish of North America.
And whenever there was an Open
House at the Executive Mansion, Mrs.
Gulliver found that she was just as
welcome as anybody else.
1t was hard lines, though, for n
natural born Orator to sit there week
after week. gradually forgetting what
his own Voice sounded like.
And Mrs. Gulliver, who always had
marched at head Of the Procession
with Bass Drum was not much
stuck on standing at the tail end Of
the Line, waiting for her Number to
be called.
Occasionally they would break into
some real Doings. but they were over
shadowed by the Brobdingnags or
High Guys of the Official Circle and
the Diplomatic Corps.
1t is a great privilege to move In
Real Society, but one does not like to
dodge restlessly about between the
Legs of Cabinet Officers and other
mastodonc Celebrities
Mrs. Guliver had been gazed at
through the Lorgnettes until she felt
like the original female Wampus,
whatever that is.
She wartcd the Congressman to loos-
en- up ana buy a House, where she
could really Entertain, and also ad-
yised him to get into the Senate, SO
that she could put her dainty French
Heel on the Necks Of those who had
kept her elboWed into a Corner
The Gullivers went home at last,
somewhat disigured, but still Game
and ready to step up at the next call OF
Time
They had seen the Big Show by peek
ing under the Canvas and they were
determined to beat the Game and land
in among the Whales IL ii took a life
time
They certainly had learned lot dur
ing their sojourn at our Nations Capt.
tai.
Back among the Lilliputs they
showed up bigger than ever CULVER
had the nerve to wear Spats. Mrs Gull
liver showed the Ladies of the Congre-
cation how to play Bridge for real
Money. Also it was commonly reported
throughout the District that they
served Liquor right at the Table.
Gulliver was So high up in the Air
that ne could not hear the Murmur Of
Discomfort down around his Ankles.
He knew that he could pick UP any
one of the LilliputS and Scrunch him
between the Thumb and Forefinger.
But he did not recall what happened
to the original Gulliver when all of the
tiny Beings got together and arranged
to put him out of Business.
Every time he had landed a Job for
one Of the Little Fellows he had been
compelled to turn down twenty others,
whereupon each of the twenty became
n Knocker and began to sharpen his
Harpoon.
Also there was an undercurrent of
Sentiment to the effect that the Gull
livers We're putting on too much Dog
since living in Washington, and did
not seem to have that old-time yearn-
ing Affection for their yappy Neigh
bors
And so, one Morning, when Gulliver
awoke after rosy Dream, in which he
made several Speeches in the Senate
and was being mentioned in tho News
papers as a Probable Candidate and
tried TO turn over he found that he
was tied hand and foot, staked down
bound and helpless.
The host of Political Mites had com,
bined against him. A gang of Ward
Workers and Precinct Captains
squatted on his Chest and gave him the
Laugh.