davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1907-03-23
PRICE TWO GENTS

all the mean husbands in this state I
think you are the capsheaf!'
"My dear second'- "A
"Stop right there, STRIP
"My second without the dear
Enough sir! The last bit of coal
we have in the house is in the stove,
and l shall leave you to keep warm
on your philosophy. l am going to
bed"
Mr.. Perkins sat for three or four
minutes after her disappearance and
pushed off his slippers and cracked his
toes and then musingly exclaimed:
"What woman! I wanted to save
her life, but she wouldn't have 1t that
wayw NJ. QUAD.
The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1907-03-23


position. He then gave it a shake and
looked at the stovepipe and slowly an.
swercd:
Mrs. Perkins, have no wish to ex
aggerate, but / may tell you that II
that stove fell down with reasonably
hot fire in 1t at the time the conse,
quences would be disastrous. The
chances would be nine out of ten that
the house would be burned to the
ground. Why do you askf'
Because about an hour before you
came home / went to put In a scuttle
Of coal and found one of the legs al.
most worked out The slightest jar
would have sent the stove tumbling.
I was so startled that l haven't got
over 1t yet"
at was wifely thing OH your part,
Mrs. Perkins, to look at the legs of
that stove. Not one wife In hundred
knows or cares whether a stove has
two legs or four or any legs at all.
l compliment you"
Same Old Coal Stove.
"I'hanks. There Is another little mat
ter want to refer to. About the mid
die of last July as we sat on the We
randa one evening we somehow touch
ed upon the subject of winter heating.
You then and there declared with u
good deal of emphasis that this house
should be heated this winter by fur
mace. / called your attention to the
g., sI,t I,nt T,l1
stove before us with its dirt and dust.
Have you any remarks to maker
"Let me see--let us see," he mused
as he felt for his memorandum book.
MAY, June, July. All, here it Is. I'm
der the date of July 10 have written;
"'Sat on the veranda with Mrs. T..
after supper. She was in her usual
complaining mood. Weather hotter than
blank. Mrs. =. said that she was de-
barred from society because we didn't
have a furnace in the house. prom.
ised one for the winter, and she quit
kicking
ayes, Mrs. Perkins, you are right.
My diary proves that you are right"
"Well, have we got furnace?"
81 can't truthfully say that we have"
"And why not, If you please?'
Mr.. Perkins got up and walked the
length of the room three or four times
and pondered over the matter and then
sat down and said:
"NIy dear second wife,
"There you gow she interrupted.
"YoU never miss an occasion to throw
that fact at me-"
Should Keep Wives Separate.
"Softly, dearest. sometimes speak
/ of you as my second wife so as not
to get you mixed up with my first.
One should keep his wives separate
What was going to say when you
interrupted me with what seemed un.
due heat was that the husband who
won't promise his wife furnace for
winter on one of the hottest days OF
midsummer has no philosophy about
him. We will mark that Exhibit A..
Again, within two days after making
. the promise ran across Johnston. he
is in the furnace busipess. spoke to
him regarding the furnace, and he said
It would cost more to put It In than
the house is worth. We will class that
as Exhibit b.
Determined not to stop until had
oil possible information. figured on
The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1907-03-23

bargain counters. What we purchase on
bargain counters usually in the end costs
heavily. 1 say let our generous minded
landowners here in Washington keep
their bargains and pay taxes and get the
benefit of the inevitable advance in values
they so confidently predict when endeav-
oring to unload their undesirable stun
on the taxpayers of the whole country.
Let us vote down all such propositions.
The house took Judge Sims at his
word and promptly voted down the
proposition.
The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1907-03-23
On the Scent.

Beggar TO blind ditto)-You have no
dog with you. How do you find your
way home?
For instance, from here go past the
shops, and when have smelled cheese
three times, cook shops four times and
chemists twice l. turn to the left and
am at home.-Pele Mele.
The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1907-03-23
A Commoner.


The welcome which Hon. James
Bryce, British ambassador, has met In
America breaks the record. 1t seems
that everybody is glad that he has
come among us. 1t Is pleasure to
meet him. The enthusiasm for him
grows out of two or three things. He
wrote "The American Commonwealth"
decidedly the best book ever written
about us by n foreigner. He has visit
ed this country many times before. He
is distinguished in his own land. He
has a charming personality. He Is a
commoner. 1t is in keeping with the
eternal fitness of things that plain,
untitled man should be ambassador to
washington. No doubt his official resi-
dence here will be Of advantage to
both countries. In politics he Is LIB
eral, and Americans, at least a vast
majority of them, have always had a
friendly feeling for the Liberals OF
Great Britain, and while of course a
foreign ambassador Is not expected or
permitted to take hand in our poll
ties, as Lord Sackville West can tes-
tlfy, still 1t Is safe to say that Mr..
Bryce will be close and intelligent OBJ
server of our political performances
and will make many notes for use In
his own political activities at home.
There Is no sort of trouble betwlxt us
and Great Britain, and there is no pros
pect of any. In fact, as President
Zachary Taylor said In his first and
only annual message to congress, 1--WE
are at peace with all the nations Of
the earth and the rest of mankind" so
the chances are that Ambassador
Bryce will have a delightful service In
the land of the free and the home Of
the brave.
The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1907-03-23
Where the Shoe Pinches.

First Magnate-Thls problem OF TAX.
Ing care of the poor is hard one.
Second Magnate--Most difficult. It's
easy enough to get money from them.
but 1t ruins them to give it back.-New
York Life.
The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1907-03-23

large theft Of public money in
~ Chicago-some say that it will
amount to million dollars
and that no arrest has been made
seems to show that "there is some
thing rotten In the state of Denmark"
and the secret service system Of
the United States would be greatly
strengthened by on Overhauling, fu-
= migati0n and renovation. Those Re-
publican officials in the Windy City
seem to think II the proper thing to be
very free with Uncle Somuel's money.
This and other recent happenings in
dicate how greatly change is needed
In the conduct of the government. No
doubt when Machin and his partners
% crime, now resident in the West
Virginia penitentiary for malfeasance
IN the postal department, hear of the
heavy swag which their Republican
brethren in Chicago got away with
and then think of their own meager
etealihgs they must be in the frame Of
mind In which Lord Give found him
self when he was accused of robbing
the East Indian princes of few mil
lions, whereupon he exclaimed, with a
great oath, "When l think of my op-
portunities. stand aghast ut my own
moderation" A thorough investiga-
tlon into and shaking up Of all the de-
partments would do world Of good
and save much money to the taxpay-
crs In the days to come. OF course
what's gone is gone beyond recall.
The mill will never grind again with
the water that Is past lido not mean
by the foregoing that all the employ
ees of the government or even large
percentage Of them are dishonest, but
do mean that III many instances
there is prcposterous prodigallty in the
expenditure of public funds and In
some cases dishonesty.
Not long since congress was compel
led to pass an act making 1t criminal
o6ense for any head of department to
create deficiency by spending on con.
tracting to expend more money than
was appropriated. They had been
warned time and again not to do so,
but they paid no more attention to the
warnings than a full feathered duck
pays to a gentle April shower They
went on deliberately and serenely
making deficiencies till congress collar
ed them. snnd then they seemed to
think that they were badly used.
Out In bleeding Kansas they never
tire Of politics. Governor Hoch has
just been sworn In for his second term,
but already redhot campaign is on
Tor the gubefnatorial succession. Sew
eral candidates are In the field, and a
stranger in Kansas would conclude
that the SunflOwer State would elect
governor In few days Instead of in
November, 1908. The strangest part
Of tho story is that the Kansans fire.
quently grow weary Of their governors
during the two year term and refuse
them the Endorsement Of a reelection.
Their greatest governor was George
T. Anthony, but he could get only one
term. Bailey had only one, though he
wanted second term very much. and
they came near beuting Hoch for re-
election.
The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1907-03-23
Wouldn't Trust Il.

"You reckon you'd make dc trip ter
heaven eff dar wuz n elevator gw!uo
darW
mo, suh! Kaze ! well knows CT I
wuz in dat elevator de devil would be
sho' ter be pullin' de rope"-Atlapta
Constitution.
The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1907-03-23
THE PERKINS FAMILY
They Have Their Usual Dispute
Over a TrifIing Matter.
THE LONG PROMISED FURNACE

Why Mr.. p. Did Not Place II In His
House-Exhibits Thirteen Different
Roa'ons--Mrs. p. Calls Him a Cap.
sheaf.
copyright. 1907, by NJ. M. Cunningham.l
Mr.. and Mrs. Perkins had been seat
ed around the family hearthstone for
half an hour or so, and he was read.
Ing the evening paper while she was
darning stocking, when she looked
up and quietly asked:
"Mr. Perkins, what would be the
consequence of that coal stove falling
down.?
"You mean with fire in 1t, Of
courseT'
"Yes."
He regarded the stove from his rock.
Ing chair for a moment and then rose
up and regarded It from standing
The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1907-03-23
Sober odd connsetleut.

Who said that race prejudice is con-
iined to the south? All who believe
any such t0mfoolery would do well to
glue their optics to this dispatch:
The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1907-03-23
Joe SibIey.
With deep affection
And recollection

Joseph CrOcker Slbley OF Pennsylvania
and so do many others with whom he
served in congress. So do all others, in
fact, who were brought into associa-
ton with him. God Iever gave to any
man a more generous heart or more
lOvable character. Everybody regret
ted his quitting congress, which he did
not only voluntarily, but against the
desire Of his constituents. In his long
career in the house he never said q
cross word to any member, but spoke
words Of kindness and did deeds of
kindness wherever he had an oppor-
tunity or wherever he could make an
opportunity. He was successful
member and discharged his duties In
telligentiy and faithfully. Many men
duplicate that. The thing which en-
deared him to many is that he Is n
lover of his fellow men, quick to rec
ognize their virtues, charitable, almost
blind, to their faults. He Is a wealthy
man and djspenses charity not only
cheerfully. but enthusiastically. He
made his money himself, having Ia.
bored with his own hands In his
younger days at the hardest sort of
work He looks after his employees
with parental affection, and II all large
employers Of labor treated their en-
ployees as Slbley treats his there
would not be another strike while the
world endures. He had as many
friends In the house as any member,
perhaps more Their benedlctions will
rest upon him all his days.
Added,
There are certain professors In the
University of Chicago who appear to
be absolutely added. To use horsy
phrase, they are rattle headed. Not
long since one of them declared
that John ID. Rockefeller is a greater
literary character than Shakespeare.
To John DIS credit be II said that he
promptly squelched that sycophant.
That professor was little later "rais.
ed" at his own game by another pro.
fessor, who declared that all religious
songs, hymns, psalms and chants are
| mere doggerel. Now comes still an
II
other, who proposes to establish de-
partment to teach folks how to make
love. Somewhere, some time, somehow,
there may have been a more nsinine
suggestion. If so, 1t has escaped OBJ
servatlon. Why, bless my soul, love-
making was the first lesson learned by
| Adam and Eve, and when Gabriel
blows his horn he will interrlpt multi.
tudes of Adams sons popping the old,
old question.
SO George w. Perkins has refunded
to the insurance company the $4,000
of which he looted 1t to help the Re-
publicans buy the presidency. This
goes to show that even Perkins thinks
that the three supreme court judges
who said he had committed n crime
knew more about 1t than the four
Judges who said he didn't.
The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1907-03-23

beauties of British society is Mrs Hirrevor who GENES
of the second Baron Trevor present holder Of the
Engslwomen
cratic ~ Mrs HiTrevor society promL
9eure
The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1907-03-23
= I. Il :: - !: :; :: s: It :: 1: II
! Champ Clark S :,
II n Covernmen, Departments Need dInvc6-
III (Oo(l(CN(To - CATION Peoples Money Squandercd ~
tlAZ\HlJ(JNU - A = Denand -
Especial washington Letter.I

fact that there has been q
large theft Of public money in
Chicago-some say that it will
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24
High School LEAGUE Games.

The first game Of the High school
league Will be played at Traction Park
on Saturday afternoon between the
Fairmont High school team and the
Morgantown High school team. The
locals are training hard for the game
anil expect to defeat their opponents.
Local lineup:
Morgan, c; Heintzelman and Pitzer,
p; Bell, IS; Fleming, Malone, Tough,
ID; Little, Oh; Siiun, Heintzelmatl
Hamilton. 3; Hamilton, F. Amos, Nc.
Donald and Bell, feeders,
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

Submerged steersts,
Some ctftbf isstea ale quoted Isl
MI gesya BiS serst atte lie pedicree
eareher, III Fan lltsr view wifi afreprez
sssntatiye q tie Lellon IrtBaae. oas
am a plumber and gasiter cut 81,
work " stamn,les Is en,pty SIT Ii
,Tyartis tie pludlo noble birth
n clalmSthe family title. aud tencments
Which viii hott c denyed tie sa1le,
IA city clerk wrote:
II have long suspected that Il an Of
high birth. People tetl NE That I have
manners above ny station o. He. Ny
photograph herewith shows that / have
an a%ristocratic cast Of face and will!
perhaps be a e.ew to my ancestry. |
do not ask for fortune, but ! aspire 10
the pride Of race"
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24
May Break the Hoodeo.

On next Friday afternoon the var
sity team from Morgantown will play
the Fairmont team at this place; on
the day following the teams will play
at the university grounds. Falrmoni
has always been unfortunate in meeting
the university team, but the fans
think that it Is time for the hoodoo
to be broken and two games to Fair
mont's credit Is looked for when the
teams meet.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

oeSFGW T.-I z = y"
He-Why did sou tell me this Il Il
was such n secret? she-But II I
didn't tell It TO somebody how could
anybody know I could Keep a secret:-
Baltimore American.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

Pitcher Roy Hit has come to terms
with the Cincinnati club and has
joined the Reds.
Included in the regime Of the Gin
clRna,i Reds are morning talks by
Manager Hanlon,
The Brooklyn club may carry two
;%icft-handed pitchers this year In
Fucker and Pastorious.
Pitcher D%usgleby's cold weather
speed would make him a find for the
Ktondike league.
President Murphy, Of Chicago. de.
clares that none of his substitutes
will be released, for the present, at
least.
Pitcher "Joe' McGlnnity Is al.
ways studying some sort Of new
curve on the ball which will keep the
batter guessing.
!,
III. I. Nhttt- a. y 49, ---H'- ,trI
-, "''
'oue" W "''o ."a'i -
f"i. pss
pat"S o"ay toM' o'fcorah
..sM ~ '.e aeeonu oase w
~" NY vans WV. NUS eh"''ee u
~ h'perlieia ; PROMISE iast WIZ
~ We sooa "sseu through one
VT oene " '"e oe''ci III uUussns
III aa'ptie
1. !,
osqi3say 'pe SPIT pa'' COOS not
apec' no arm. ne auS'ses asaii's@
~ use ov.a pl'ehef VINO a a wlhd'
'''s urn ~ ~
Inc Star' VI t"e o's leasnes SHOWS
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24
DEEDS ignl!edb by
Patrick Henry
PAPERSoF UNUSUAL HISTORIC! IN;


ALIILEaOEFkENa fN#sN WI N'.HNNH 60
PARKERsBuRG April 2l:-circult
Clerk Hogan yesterday in looking
over some papers Of record In his Of
ice dtsceooyered 2 deed signed By Pat:
Henry he same who declared
for death L liberty were taken away;
and lie Sonetlme governor Of the CON.
monSealth ofjSVlrglnia.
The deed conveyed certain properly
i Tie present STATE Of West Virginia
one Jacob Beeson, and was signed
NJ Patrick Henry as governor. Tho
) document is musty with age, having
been Of record since 1852. the date Of
ITS execution.
However. the chirography is still
to- Ne declphered, and 1t was plain that
Patrick Henry wrote a very plain
though Withal q rather characteristic
hand.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

Age does not make us childish. as
some say. I, tnts Us true Children,
Goethe.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

Rheumatic sufferers can have a free
sample Of Or. Shops Rheumatic Rem
edy with book on Rheumatism by sim.
ply writing d. shoop, Racine, Wis \
This book will explain how Dr.. shoop'ss
Rheumatic Remedy successfully drives
rheumatism out Of the blood. This
remedy IS not a relief only. It aims
to clear the blood entirely 81 rheumat'
icEPelsoRs, and then rheumatism must
ole d natural death. Sold by E. A.
Bllllngsleas& Go. K
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24
BITS FOR SPORTS


Milly Murray. the energetic man.
ager Of the Phlllies, says that his
team will go much faster when the
season is well under way.
,Falkenberg and Blankenship are
said to be the tallest battery in the
big leagues.
Doc scaniou, winning pitcher last
year for Brooklyn, Is attending the
Hong Island Medical college. He will
not report until the patter part Of
May.
Usually It Is not the stars who are
hard to handle. The trouble men us
a rule are the ones who feel they
must cover their shortcomings by at.
tacks on the umpire.
American Assocfation fons c,,,n
that The Toledo AMI ono,,s
teams will be stronger this season
than the Roston or q o;,,s 800
o, tbe National ,aor,,o =, II. Wei
,neton Americana
" sat,sdod h n, , fr.o aoont 49,, =,
n,oy, With onv aim MIN t,ho n,oa.has
worms mn , IN r,n,t h,,mo ~,
m,oh -
pitche, nr,coc :, ~ ,,
nh,o N,t,ono,s 4. ,ao,ao a. 49,
nh,,.do,nn,n :, NJ
ri,
..,a.m n,.
-. ~, .,s,.a; ..s
han Ian,.. 90 ~, ,,",;
- .as,s, J., ,.,.iaa 49,,
tho nro,t n.,,nn., sna.t :, mIona"
@,oo,, m,n. n,oaa,, 49, 10 m,os. $500
g., ton.n ~ ~ .s ~
a.
49,
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

For the sake Of his hitting It has
been proposed TO the Boston Ameri.
cans to play Grimslsaw In right field,
now that Bobby Unglaub has first
sack clnched.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

Charlie Carr. Clarke Griffith and
old Pop" France, Of Kent, claim the
origin of the squeeze play. Pretty
soon this question will be in the class
with Who struck Billy Patterson
and t'Who stole Charlie Ross?"
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24
Game Called OF.

The game at Wheeling scheduled
for yesterday afternoon was called of
on account Of the rain. This was quite
a disappointment to the local team,
for they expected to even things with
the Wheeling team for the irubbing IT
got on Monday.
There will be some changes made
in the local team this week. John
speeht will likely be added to the Fair.
mont bundh.: ~
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

Cy Seymour has two ambitions that
he desires to realize this year. The
first Is to- lead the National league
in hitting, and the second is to make
more home runs on the Polo grounds
than ever were made there In one sea.
son by an individual player.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

Jones was rTn ont Of the grounds
and George Davis was henched for FIR.
ing the ball at Umpire Stafford, all
in one game. II the New Giants had
done such things what a howl there
would be about rowdies.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

Mhly Murray. the energetic man.
alger Of the Phlllles, says that his
team will go much faster when the
season is well under way.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24
49, ..ssss.ss .ss.ssss ~ A.aasss. sss.ssass..s.
4E NAIHO,NA GAME
g%NATIoNAL LEAGUE.

*lsssSs $500 ;s*s.ss s: ss:ss
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

Pitcher Roy Hit has come to terms
with the Cincinnati club and has
the Reds.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

Doc scanion, winning pitcher last
year for Brooklyn, Is attending the
Long Island Medical college. He will
not report until the patter part Of
May.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

Pitcher Duggieby, of the Philadci.
phIa Nationals. IS a hoodoo for the
Philadelphia Americans. They have
never Won a game from him.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

Danny Shay is Tom C%orcoran's
nearest rival for the second base job
with the Giants, with little chance Of
disptactng the ex.Red.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

Falkenbers and B%lankenship are
said to be the tallest battery in the
big leagues.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

President Murphy, Of Chicago. de.
clares that none of his substitutes
will be released, for the present, at
least.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

Pitcher Duggleby's cold weather
speed would make him a find for the
Ktondike league.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

Philadelphia labor unions have
started q boycott against all baseball
clubs not asing union made balls.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

American Association fans claim
that the Toledo and Indianapolis
teams will be stronger this season
than the Boston or st. Louis teams
Of the National league or the Wash.
.ington Americans.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

Included in the regime of the Gin
clRna,i Reds are morning talks by
Manager Hanlon.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

It Isl stated that Pittsburg will turn
Pitcher Miller, the Indian boy, adrlft.
He isIa southpaw with more than or.
binary speed.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

Sam Crawford, Of the Detroit
Americans, names his bats, Grace,
Emma, Julia and Maria are his ia.
vorites.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

The Brooklyn club may carry two
.l%eft;handed pitchers this year in
Fucker and Pastorious.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

KID Elbertfeli's promise last win.
ter to be good lasted through one
whole game. In the second game he
wak sent TO the bench for abusing
tlid umpire. u
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1907-04-24

From a purely dope view the Chi.
cago Cubs loola like world heaters
this season.