davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17
BY YE LOCAL SCRIBE.

Brokers clerks in + street are
threatening to strike. OveIEoIked.
MAJ. Sylvester is not the author
Of a new handbook or Washing
ton.
Neighbor Chase. ne what owns the
opOry house. came into town last
week.
Mine Host Tally is back on deck
at the Raleigh, after a rejuTenating
vacation.
Harry Rapley took q little rIn
over to Nsrragaasett Pier last
week in his electric.
Bob Mckahan's new house IN
Sixteenth street Is now getting the
finishing touches. as it were.
We notice ThIman Hendrick. OF
here, is back from Spring Lake.
Says bathing is good on Jersey
shore.
Col. W. B. H.-you know him
has bought a new runabout. A
daisy Don't groan. Great hill
climber.
There is some talk Of electiug
Commissioner BIaefarlsnd mayor Of
cathedral Heights. A good man.
too. by iinksl
Henry L. West officially pro-
nounces Ross Andrews the best IN
professional chauffeur in togn, hay
ing tested bin.
Chow TszChi. charge daffairas Of
tae Chinese legation. is going on
long voyage He wiz spend the
rest Of the summer at Chevy Chase.
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17
FINANCIAL MYTH-MAKERS.
Imaginary Causes Assigned for
Troubles OF wall Street.

Troubles OF Wall Street.
From the New York Evening Post
The myth-makeTs are abroad to-day.
You meet them at every street corner
and In every car. wagging solemn heads
and telling all corners exactly what is
the cause OF the troubles in Wall street.
One man viii demonstrate to you that il
was the Standard Oil fine. Another will
prove 10 nicely that Il was the corpora-
ton batting Of the government The
tariff, so far as we know, has not been
brought IN. but why should it not be
Taft, the favorite candidate of Roose-
welt for the Presidency, has declared
himself for cutting down protective du-
ties, and why should not that gun kick
before it is fired. as disastrOusiy now as
in AsS? A reasoner of the strict Re
publican order Of logic could make out
good case for the contention that
lodges announcement last week that
the tariff would be revised In 1919. was
the vera Causa Of the fall of stocks this
week. There is no lack. naturally. OF
personalities 10 go with the mythical
causes. II is the Southern governors. il
Is Hughes; il is the public service com
missiOners; II is Bonaparte il is a coun-
try looking at Roosevelt. and saying.
Hamlet-fashion. Something too much
of this lie must be hard to suit in
the way OF mythical causes. and per-
SCEs without real responsibility, who can
not make his choice among SO many
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17
rhnso Gnnd oId storles

/ The public library OF Worcester, Mass.
/ is trying very hard to qualify itself for
the same term by. which Mr.. Bundle, the
BeadIe. designated the law. 1t has not
been long since this library attracted at
tention to itself by barring certain of the
books of Mark Twain from its shelves.
and now It comes out with ban upon the
works Of Horatio Alger. jr., on the
grounds that the stories for boys which
this author has written are not true.
What a senseless and absurd criterion
that is TO judge boys books by. Not
true! OF course not. in the narrow sense
that each incident portrayed in the stories
is a positive fact. But in their substance
these stories are true. with the best kind
of truth Their heroes are manly, honest
and upright They win their ways in the
world by deeds OF daring and probity; the
boys who do wrong are punished. and the
books teach. in most interesting and In
structiye way. that those who are good
shall be happy"
Who is there to-day would recommend
to the reading Of boys the novels of Mr.
Henry Fielding. OF Tobias Smollett. or of
lie Sage? And yet remember Charles
Dickens in his loneliness at the Murd-
stones, In a little chamber filed with
books left by his father:
From that blessed little room Rodericf Ran
dom. Pererine Pickle Humphrey ClnAcr Tom
Jones. the Vicar of Wakefield Don ouixoto. Gil
Bias. and Robinson Crlsoe came OFT, glorious
host. 10 keep me company. They kept alive my
fancy and ny hope Of something beyond that place
and time-they. and the Arabian Nights and the
Tales Of the Ccnii-and did nc no harm; fcT what
ever harm was in some Of them not there for
ne: I knew nothing Of il"
Not true! Who is there bold enough to
say that Robinson Crusoe was not
startled when he saw that footprint in the
sand? Is 1t not true that David Copper
field learned in the blacting warehouse
In London the lessons of thrift and indus
try that were to cling to him through
after life? Did not Midshipman Easy In
deed make that voyage up the Mediter-
ranean: or is it a mistake that without
Masterman Ready the Swiss Family Rob
inson would have Jared but III on their
desert isle? The boy who. hearing the
roar OF the sea in his ears, does not ex-
pect to see the one-legged old pirate of
Treasure Island" stumping around the
corner, or cannot picture in the woods
the haunt of The Last of the Mohicans.
is lacking in imagination and has lost one
of the best gifts Of God.
Was there ever book written for bows
that came up TO the Worcester Public
Library's demand for truth? The books
of Horatio Alger are not. perhaps. the
best-written books In the world. but they
are based on historical incident. convey
lot of valuable information deftlg. and.
above all. they excite and stimulate the
Imagination. and their tendency IS wholly
for the good II viii be a sad day for
our boys when they are deprived Of the
good old stories that have done so much
10 make you happy, simply because they
are not true
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17
The DECEASED wife.s sister.

They are at it again in England-row-
ing over the right of a man TO wed his
deceased wife's sister. Every year. with
out fail the House of Commons passes
a bill permitting this sort Of wedding con-
tract to be made. Just as regularly, and
just as certainly. the noble lords kill It,
From time immemorial this battledoor-
and-shuttlecock game has engaged the
annual attention Of Parliament and agi-
tated the ultra conservative thought of
the nation most severely
Somehow we wish Parliament would
pass the bill and give the deceased wife's
sister a chance We see no good and
sufficient reason why she should be drag
ged into the iimelight so persistently and
so regularly. We cannot understand why
a man who finds comfort. pleasure. sat
isfaction, and content in the society Of
his departed helpmeet's next of kin
should be denied the right of leading her
to the altar and installing her as the
head of his household and the mistress
OF HIS domestic destiny Much less do
We understand why the lady should be
debarred from such an alliance, pro-
vided It suits her fancy and meets the
approval OF her better judgment.
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17

not after he unsettllng effect of another
national campaign" This declaration
viii be unwelcome to those Republicans
Who Ike Senator Lodge and others, have
grudgingly committed themselves to tariff
revision in 1909. The National Association
Of Manufacturers has a concrete PROPOSE
ton to place before Congress and II viii
require some pretty active hustlng on the
part Of the C. o. p. to prevent the tariff
question from coming up at the next ses-
sion. We hope the association Will ad-
here to its purpose TO press its proposal,
and that it viii insist on receiving re-
spectful hearing.
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17
WOULDN'T TOU?

Popular song as rendered b. that
famous barytone. 7. r.. IN :be
latest musical comedy, The Sage
Of SaEamcre HILL
What message did "SVeck" bring
10 oyster Bay
Wouldn't yen like to know?
Am ] glad that we now can go
riding each day
Wouldn't you Ike 90 knoW7
Ny tennis court gathers from far
and from rear;
Why should ] receive a mere prince
from koreal
Am I glad 20 see Hartman quak-
ing with fear?
wouldn't you Ike TO know
CHORUS.
Wouldn't you like TO know,
How much Of the gossip is so?
II the man in the street
With guess indisGect
Knows what Metcalf snd are
10 do with the fleet
Oh, wouldn't sou Ike to know?
Was l glad when I heard Of the
Standard Oh fne?
Wouldn't you ike 70 know?
Do think Dir. Fairbanks should
serve bis guests wine?
Wouldn't you Ike 20 knowf
At Taft's boom in Ohio, Gid
laugh With glee
Did ] go In swimming where the
teachers could see?
Do think that Bin Bryan SO
madly loves ne?
Wouldn't you ike TO know?
CHORUS.
Wouldn't you like to know,
II BOnapaTfe really viii 90,
Or il l think we must
Get ready 70 bust
Any old thing that looks like a
trust
Oh, wouldn't you like TO knoBi
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17
CHAPTER ".

As inertia. the Gypsy bride, stalked
proudly down the aisle Of the
church, the wedding guests stood
aghast. The nerTeless minister, di-
vesting himself Of his slTplicc. was
preparing to run into the VestTy. and
Floating Flora. her face scarcely less
pale than that Of her prospective
bridegroom. cEewed her gum with 4
perCeptible effort.
To the soft strains Of a hrdy-
gIrdy. Nerita approached the trem-
bling twain. Standing close 10
Floating Florence, and waving her
hand IN mystic passes through the
air. she chanted this strange
prophecy;
when Rockefeller PAYS the Stand
ard S fine
Daniel shall husband be Of thine. 3"
Back, woraang cried Guy Oar
rel. finding his voice. Il know you
not
"0h. George. can this be truel"
cried Floating Flora, ere she
tainted.
Before Guy Darrell could catch
her in his arms. and even at the
moment that her head fell with r
thEack on the chancel floor. little
Danny Marco, Darreps best friend.
broke through the fire-llnes.
The autos at the door, he said
At these magic words, accom-
panied b. the sound Of the spark
plug trying to keep pace with the
speedometer, Floating Flora gave a
fTightful scream. and when she
ceased Guy Darrell had disappeared
Editors Note-The continuation Of
this thrilling narrative win be found
ID No. i9 Of The Big SticE. Back
numbers Of al neWsdealcrs.
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17
wISCoNS1NS REGULATION LAW
Public Utilities Commission Given
Most Comprehensive Powers.

From tbs Review Of Reviews.
Ia the regulation Of rates. fares, and
charges the Wisconsin legislation marks
an important advance on that Of New
York and other States in the fact that the
commission fixes the rates absolutely and
not merely the maximum rates. 1t is as
much an offense for a corporation to
charge less as It is to charge more than
the rate set by the commission. This is
designed 10 prevent discrimination. but
the commission is required 20 make a
comprehensive classification Of services
for each utility. in which IL may take ac-
count Of the quantity purchased the time
when used, and any other condition that
reasonably jUsthes a difference in the
rate per unit OF service. Thus. discrlmi-
nations are authorized but they must be
open and reasonable and must be estab-
lished only after public investigation.
BY the enactment Of this law the rail-
road commission becomes % the fullest
extent a public service commission
Every public utility in the State except
streets, highways, and bridges. is brought
within its jurisdiction. It becomes also a
local government board for II regulates
towns. villages and cities in their man
agement 81 these undertakings It's
authority is great ana far reaching. Il
employs experts and agents and fixes
their compensation. and can draw on all
Of the unappropriated money ia the State
treasury. 1t enters into the daily life Of
the people more than all other agencies
of government combined.
This viii become more evident as time
goes on. FOR under rs control Is placed the
development OF the enormous water power
of Wisconsin, which eventually. through
electricity. Will light the streets and
houses and furnish motive power 20 oper-
ate railways, factories ard possibly even
farms
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17
EVERY SATURDAY.
Our Motto: If you see it in The Big
Stick, IT isn't so.
A JOURNALISTIC SLANDERER.

There lies before rs Vol III, No.
.. The Gotham Weekly Gazette.
IL IS more IN s0rruW than in anger
that We pay our respects 10 the
sheet. A paper that does as it
does Is discredit to the Fourth
Estate. Our devoted patrons viii
bear US out when We say that We
are not won't 70 indulge in person
alities. Amenities Of journalism is
our long suit But It would be
craven on our part TO sit idly BY
when We are assailed and turn the
other cheek.
This scurrilous Gotham Gazette
goes beyond all bounds In the
aforesaid No. p, Vol. III, b. auda-
cicusly abiding 70 us as that
human nature-faker. the Washing
ton ID. c. Big Stick.
Nov we pride ourselves on our
well-eaned reputation for conserva-
tism. and are sure such a slur
viii fall Cat IN this community.
where we are Sd favorably known.
But # may do Us harm in the cir
cumscribed territory where our
rival circilates, and 50 we strike
back.
The editor Of the Gazette-we re-
frain from naming him-is a notori-
Gus violator Of the recognized code
Of newspaper ethics. He had his
training, We hear, in South Chi
cago. and in the language Of our
literary editor. who knows the
creature. his methods are char
acteristic Of his early environ
ment. But the exposure of his
political duplieity, which we did
IN gentlemanly terms. does not
justify any bully-raggin'. brow
beatin' tactics at on expense, and
will not 90 with rs. We defy him
and hurl defiance in his teeth; and
VIC warn him, once and for all,
that he viii rue the day that he
again crosses our path.
As for the low-browed Gazette
which ne 50 brazcnly edits, We wash
our hands Of il forever, having
struck it of our exchange list.
If. gentle reader, you feel that
we have shown some heat in this
editorial. We trust that you will
consider the enCrmity Of the gross
ahrcnt offered us and the unWar-
ranted provoca;ion to which We
have been put
THE tariff reform leader written
for this edition goes over tin next
week for lack OF space.-Ed. Big
Stick
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17
A LITTLE NONSENSE.
ADD A SYLLABLE.

The bard revlles the city's strife and
prates about The Dear Old Hum.
But closely sticks 20 city life, and never
wanders back, by gum
The Dear Old Hums not far away, and
yet he strictly keeps him thence.
He doesn't seem TO care to pay the neces-
sary eighty cents.
About The Dear Old Hum, you know. he
yawps IN maudln prose and rhyme
Pretends ii Is the place to so If one would
have royal time.
Yet n this place perfection's pink, he
never cares TO show his mug;
Which makes me much inclined 20 think
The Dear Old Hum Is largely Bug.
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17
A Manufaeturers, Tsriff creed

The National Association Of Manufac-
turers has formulated tariff profession
of faith which is significant of the trend
Of sentiment among those CAPTAINS Of in
dustry who are not direct benefciaries Of
the protective policy. The new tariff
creed does not cast aside the doctrine of
protection to American industry by means
Of tariff duties, but 1t declares that "our
present tariff, in many of its schedules
IS unjust and unequal, giving to some a
smaller measure Of protection than is
needed, and to others greater industrial
advantages than are equitable. resulting
in abuses and in a social unrest disturb
ing the body polite" Any further re-
vision Of the tariff under the old methods
IS deprecated. for the reason that ii is by
these methods the present injustlces OF
the tariff have arisen, and it is proposed
that the framing Of tariff schedules be
taken out of politics altogether and treat
ed as a purely business proposition. A
plan for accomplishing this result is thus
outlined:
We believe in placing the tariff under non
partisan tariff commission not mike the present
Interstate Commerce Commission. with seni-ju-
dicial powers. as for example to summon witnesses
this commission TO investigate thoroughly and scien-
tihcally the various schedules. and from time 10
time submit their conclusions in the form Of
recommendations 10 Congress ard the Executive 1t
should lie within the power Of this commission and
the Executive 10 increase OF decrease the present
schedules within such minimum or maximum limits
as Congress IL its wisdom may determine, to the
end that an equitable adjustment be made not as
the result Of few months work Of a Congressional
committee. but Of the careful aud systematic work
OF permanent and practical commercial body"
The belief Is expressed in the new tariff
creed that Congress should at its next
session pass a bill creating a tariff COM
mission. '-The time 10 take the tariff out
Of politics. says the creed, lis now. and
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17
DRooLER'S DICTIONARY

Amercement: A pecuniary pen
atty easier TO assess than 70 col
lcCt.
Big Stick: A creature whose bark
is worse than its bite.
Check: 4 document that docs not
necessarily imply money in the
bank.
Dime: A piece Of money. three
Of which constiruts the sum that
Mr.. Rockefeller feels like.
Evidence: The information which
lawyers are hircd to prevent Wit
nesses from giving.
Fine: lSee Amercementl,
Gold l0bsl; This word las
passed out Of the poor mans die
tionary.
Haste; A clause seldom included
III government contracts.
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17


The success Of the British battle ship
Dreadnought, although it has not been
tested in actual warfare-and let Us hope
it viii not be-has been 50 gratifying TO
the British admiralty that, il is said, a
new battle ship IS now projected to be Of
9o,000 tons displacement. as against the
% 000 tons OF the Dreadnought.
In this country. since the launching Of
the Dreadnought, many people have IN
sisted that we should not be outdone, and
it has been estimated that for S2O,0o0, 600
this country could build battle ship
that would be the largest afoat and If
this question Of size is not altogether q
naval bugbeaT. should be the most formi-
dable.
One might think that this rivalry could
so on indefinitely. and, looking to the
future, imagination would see huge float
ing fOruesses Of steel. the cost Of which,
with their upkeep would be an enormous
burden on the tax-payng people But,
fortunately. nature has set a limitation.
Recently there have been put into COM
mission two immense turbine passenger
steamers for service across the Atlantic.
These are so much larger than any OF
their predecessors that It became neces-
sary TO dTedge out the channels Of both
the Mersey and Hudson rivers before
these ships could come to dock. The
Dreadnought finds herself barred from
many 81 the harbors Of the world by rea-
son Of her great size, and larger ships
than she would find their field of endeavor
much more circumscribed. \ battle ship
that cannot go into port is useless, and
until the harbors Of the world are made
over for their accommodation we shall
have to be satisfied with the monsters
already designed.
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17
synchronic Event.

From the New York Evening Post.
The passage Of the deceased wife's sis
ter bill in the British House Of Commons
happened to fall this year on the same
day as Speaker Cannon's announcement
Of '1et well enough alone" as our Ameri-
can tariff policy. It Will simplify the
international political calendar if these
two annual events can be permanently
synchrOniZed.
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17
MEN AND THINGS.
Loas 20 French LLteralnre.

LoHs 10 FFeuEE Literature.
The death recently Of NJ Clovis
Hughes deprives French literature and
Journalism of prominent figure
al. Hughes was a native OF Menerbes
(Naucivse), where he was born Novem-
Der 3. ls5l He became q journalist at
twenty. III 1881 he was elected 70 the
Chamber OF Deputies, and was for some
years prominent In political iife His
claim 10 remembrance Is founded on a
considerable output Of literary work,
which includes several volumes of prose
and poetry. His "Poemes de Prison"
were composed during three years Of
Incarceration. He also wrote Romans
de M0etHs Parlsiennes, and 'Romans
V!llageois. as well as comedies and trag-
edies. which nave been produced on the
stage. Mime. Clovis Hughes Is well
known for her work In sculpture. ana
has been an exhibitor at the Salon since
1886
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17

Il is a fact not generally known that
there are a number Of Buddhists IN this
country. and IN Philadelphia there are a
number Of Mohamedans. Some of them
are natives Of India. but there are a NUM-
Der Of Americans who have joined the
Moslem faith. They meet from time 20
time al one another's houses for worship
One of the number. who formerly lived
in Turkey has been the chief pr0selyter,
and It has been his function TO translate
and comment on the Koran In New
York there is a building used as a tenn
pie to Shintoism, where many japanese
and some Chinese go regularly for the
rites OF that faith.
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17
Increasing Postal Functions.

From the New YorS Globe.
We do not approach some European
states in our extension Of postal func-
tons. What with their passenger posts.
their postal collection Of bills, postal
telegraph, and postal telephone. they
have made of the post-ofice a sort of
omnium gatherum that is unsuited TO
our conditions for the present, and for a
considerable future time at least But
there are certain well-indicatef directions
in which advancement may have been
too greatly delayed. Mr. Meyer, by
careful and discreet testing OF these mat
tiers. may see benefits conferred upon the
country which will be of inestimable value
10 il
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17
3" THE STRIKE.

60 the tune OF old Black joe. ,
flushed is the click Of the tele-
graphic key;
The Postal is closed the ". L. and
the A Z.
Crossed are the wires. DER ell the
land ! know;
hear the operators calling:
Dough- More Dough. "
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17
American Opportunity,

Prom the New YORK Times.
Time and fortunate circumstances con
secrate the obscure beginnings Of rank
and family. The Irish Of a generation
ago are now our Senators and our
judges. The opportunities Of a country
blessed with great natural wealth are
potent to-day for the salvation and the
exaltation Of great numbers of human
beings who are unable to make Roadway
In overcrowded Europe.
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17

From the Kansas City Star.
With Secretary Taft's marvellous capac-
ity for work, there is no good reason why
he should resign his Cabinet position be-
cause he is a candidate for the Presidency,
VIII Cannon resign? VIII Foraker. OF
Knox, or Fairbanks? Certainly not. Then
why Taft?
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17
A Call for Mr.. GriEgs.

From the Springfield Republican
Secretary BOnaparte has certainly in
CURED the serious displeasure of the Wall
ST Get community. "Oh. for an hour OF
Griggs." expresses the sentiments Of
the street We refer to Mr. Griggs, OF
New Jersey, who could happily interpret
a law in a sense exactly opposite from
what il said.
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17
WALL STREET LOYAL.
Having Become Used TO Roosevelt. I,
Opooses Any Ch-,sr

Opposes Any Change.
BY Telegraph 10 The Big Stick tde-
layed in transmision.l
New York. Aug. l5.-By a sinEu-
lar evolution Of sentiment Wall
street hostility to Roosevelt has
given place TO active and enthusias-
tic support. Having adjusted lis
affairs, not without some difficulty,
TO conform TO a radical administra-
ton AZ Washington. the great anan-
cial center feels that any reversal
Gf governmental policies would tend
20 disarnnge and unsettle business.
The election OF a reacti0naTy 70 the
Presidency VIII. therefore. be stub
bCmly resisted. Pressure Is being
brought TO bear upon Roosevelt TO
nan again. Mr.. Hartman is keenly
alive 10 this let-well-eaough-alone
feeling in the street.
The Washington herald., 1907-08-17
safe and Sane.


From the Boston Transcript
Speaker Cannon makes the prediction
that the Republican National Convention
of 1903 viii either formulate new policies
or adhere to the present platform of the
Republican party. Such prediction
proves Mr. Cannon a safe man, and its
verifcation may be put down as among
the certainties.