davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR.

From the New York Press.
 A man could give up smoking for some- thing worse.
 There's nothing so kittenish as a young widow unless it's an old maid.
 There's not room enough in a flat for the children to fight with comfort.
 A woman thinks an elastic currency has something to do with where she carries it.
 You can tell whom girl means to marry a man by the way she wears oolors to match his completion.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

President Ban Johnson wins the ap- plause of cleanly disposed people when he proposes to stop pitchers from talk ing the shine on the spot from new baseball.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

Thermometers are being stolen in Chicago. Somebody is evidently de- termined to keep close watch on the weather man.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

Brooklyn exects to become the Mec- ca of those who have honeymoons on their hands, because such persons can go there in tunnel.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

An editorial in q Chicago contempo- rary on ''rhe Law and Rascals,' re- minds us that the two don't meet as often as they might
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

The outsiders who do not like the Oklahoma constitution are invited by the natives to discuss it, for discussion is good for the soul and it would not affect them.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

mands the imprisonment of malefac. tors of great wealth. You pays your money and you takes your choice.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

Speaker Joe Cannon proposes to postpone a national and rational pol icy of waterways improvement to the latest possible moment.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

The Ohio railroads have had g. cent rate nearly two years, and they see nothing of confiscatory nature in f$
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

That loud slamming you hear is the sound of banks closing their doors.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

Chicago is now chiefly engaged in moving its snow crop.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

The good people of Pittsburg are those who make no noise.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08
THE DIVIDEND.

The dividends a funny thing Belonging to a trust, Which when 1t has no dividend Is pretty apt to bust. A company of men who own But very little hair Sit smoking round a table and A dividend declare. The common people never learn Just how it happens so, Altho their little earnings help The dividend to grow.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

Academic confiscation flourishes in Montgomery only.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

The President wants legalized rail- road pools, and Senator Jeff Davis de-
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08
THE PoLITEsT EVER.

''There goes a polite man.
 "Fll bet he isn't as polite as bar keeper"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08
ADRIFT WITH
 THE TIMES

TOYLAND. All aboard for Toyland, N for Boyland,
 for Joyland, The merry Christmas time will soon be On golden wings 'tls swiftly drawing near! What a hustle and rustic As the shoppers come and go And the present hunters scramble, Swiftly ebblng to and fro! All the trinket stores are busy And the streets are crowded, too And each face is smiling, smiling Like the sunshine breaking through. All aboard for Toyland.
 for Boyland
 for Joyland, The land where all the latest Wonuers are, The fuzzy-wuzzy Teddy bear, the speedy auto carl There are jumping jacks and dollies That can talk and close their eyes, Trolley cars and locomotives That will fill you with surprise. There are cottages and cooking sets, And stoves as true as life Just the sort of fine utensils For tiny little wife
 All aboard for Toyland,
 for Boyland,
 for Joyland, The flannel clown is calling from the shelf, "oh, please sir, mister, take me for your self!''
 Such tinl1le and a erinkle As person never heard. All the Toyland folk are talking And exchanging word for word. And they seem to be more happy Than we mortals ever get, For they're nearly always smiling And they hardly ever fret. All aboard for Toyland,
 for Boyland,
 for Joyland, The land where little children like to stay! It's charm will never, never pass away There's a hurry and a furry, From the bottom to the top, And the soldier in the window Signals to the Brownie "cop,' And there's so much fun and frolic, So much laughter and applause, That we're every one excited, Waiting round for Santa Claus!
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

A treatise on the art of feeding snakes reminds us that if we had to feed them they'd all starve to death.
 PAUL COOK.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

A Houston negro shook a persimmon sapling within the city limits Monday night and 27 rolling fat 'possums fell to the ground Only in Grand Old Texas do niggers enjoy the rapture of 'possum showers.-Houston Post.
 Truth crushed to earth will rise again and take the first train out of Houston, Tex.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08
SIMPLY A REMINDER

Forsooth, we hate to harp on this. But why not do your Christmas shop
 ping now? The time Is rather short, you wis, Old Santa Claus, ere long, will make
 his bow. Of course, 'tis nothing much to us Whats more, we never like to raise
 row But here's question to discuss Oh, why not do your Christmas shop
 ping now?
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08
POEM

There was a man in our town With nothing much to do. And so he spent his idle time Knocking the gas company.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

The youngster who takes his first news paper assignment looks forward to bril- liant future. As a gray-haired reporter who buffets the storm on a night round the dream of his youth abides. Some- where, safely locked in a desk drawer, away from prying eyes and vandal hands, lie the children of his fancy. Perhaps they are unpublished novels, over which he laughed and cried through years of hard work, books which the divine fire of in- spiration would some day make famous. Perhaps, there is a bundle of stories, bravely sent out and returned with the terse, inevitable regrets" Or, perhaps, half ashamed and yet at times almost be- lieving them immortal. he has slowed away fragments of verse and poems that no one ever heard him mention. That battered, dust-covered desk is the altar of his dreams, where he has beaten his heart out on the cold, unresponsive keys of a typewriter-not more cold and unrespon- sive, however than the world which lie has learned to know in all it's seamy and unprofitable aspects.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

''Ten Nights in a Bar Room is tour ing Alabama. Excluding Sundays, there are only twenty more nights in a bar room remaining to Alabama and Georgia topers.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

Some Birmingham ladies gave Pie Social' the other day Now they are en- tertaining dyspepsia.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08
IN OBJECTION.

Look up, look up when the shadows fall
 And the way lies dark before you, Hold fast to the faith that is best of all
 And success will not ignore you.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08

What's the use of having para graphers unon'? We can't skin any body.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1907-12-08


 There was quite a large attendance of United States Senators. which gave espe- cial point to a witty and delightful lecture on "Duties of New Senator's" Among those who were present to heed the words which fell trippingly from the lecturers lips were Senator Bourne of Oregon, Johnston of Alabama. Paynter of Ken lucky. Davis of Arkansas, Brown of Ne braska, Dixon of Montana, Gore of Okla hema. and Guggenheim of Colorado. Senator Gore of Oklahoma seemed espe- cially pleased when member of the club. into the room: T came bearing greetings and gifts he said.
 Gut out the greetings" said President Blythe. What are the gifts?
 "Oklahoma.' said the visitor, pre- sents the republican administration and the republican Congress with two demo- cratic Senators and four democratic Rep resentatives.'
 s'Is that all?"
 NO: next year 1t will give Bryan six electoral votes."
 With triumphant whoop the red-skin hit the trail and left Chairman New of the republican national committee and his fellow republicans to think it over.
Camas Prairie chronicle. [volume] (Cottonwood, Idaho) 1901-1917, 1907-05-03

Torpid Liver.-Take q Ouartas
Of calomel every two hours nn,,, W
thartic action is produced and s,,
with pluto, hunyadi or epson sslts Y
taking Of these purgatives IS N .s
mate the mercurial properties iron K.
body.
Dropsy.-one pint Of bruised
tard seed, one pint Of bruised Bo
radish roots, eight ounces Of no.
vitae chips and four ounces Of b,a,.'.
Indian hemp root Put all the Ins,..'
ents into seven quarts Of SWEEP eN.
and let simmer over a slow nra rs
reduced to about four quarts ,s~
strain and bottle. The dose is 81.
glass four times a day or mora # !.
quired.
Cough.-Take two ounces Of ...
spirits OF nitre, four ounces Of Bill.
Inc, two tablespoonfuls Of dover no
ders and put in an eight-ounce NAL
Shake well before using. The doss x.
an adult is one teaspoonful chlId,
according to age. 1t is well to mir Il.
dover powders in half an ounce /.
water before adding to the spirits /.
the powder viii not mix well with M
spirits.
Paper Wind Shield. westh.
and winter is the source Of much drs.s
on the part Of some persons. Pneums
MIA, grippe and various forms of ml
monary ailments loom large snd tbrsss
enlngly before them at the mention \
winter. A cold wind is one Of Tie mo.
disagreeable things to face. No malta,
how warmly one may be bundled Am
the wind seems to strike through n,
cloth and chill just the same. All IN
fashioned and almost forgotten wag y
getting the better of the wind-god 4 Z.
place a folded newspaper over ths
chest and under the outer clothing ana
the same may be located at the bach
The close fiber of paper makes It Al.
most imperVious to wind. Add to thIs
the fact that it is a poor conductor Of
heat and we have an ideal cold-pro.
article. When one is driving against
strong wind nothing will keep ths
lungs and body so warm as sheet q
newspaper. Put layer Of paper u.
side Of your rubbers before going BIT
for walk and you win be surprised
how warm 1t will keep your feet
Camas Prairie chronicle. [volume] (Cottonwood, Idaho) 1901-1917, 1907-05-03

tents In intensifying the efrects Of q
bullet nred through closed receptacle
is shown by one OF Kocher's expert
ments. Two identical tin canisters
were filed with equal quantities Of lint
which in one was dry and In the other
saturated with water. A bullet Of
moderate velocity fred through them
simply perforated the dry one, but
caused the wet one to burst explosively.
Kocher also filed skull with water
and found that bullet fred through
it caused bursting Of the sutures.
Very remarkable Is the shattering that
results when skulls that have been
filled with water or with wax are
treated in this way, and If they are
compared with others showing the eff
fects of bullet wounds under normal
conditions it is easy to appreciate that
the variations presented are dependent,
In part at least, upon the difference in
the character Of the contents.
Camas Prairie chronicle. [volume] (Cottonwood, Idaho) 1901-1917, 1907-05-03
ERECTING FIGHTING sUFTRAGIsTs FROM HOUSE OF ooMoNs

erpool or Hamburg and there take
steamer direct to Valparaiso.
When the European steamship lines
respond, as they will shortly, to the
Argentine governments ofrer Of sub
sides for quick service, the passage
from Liverpool to Buenos Ayres will
be reduced to fifteen days This win
make the journey to Valparaiso dur
ing the summer months, when the
Andes passes are open, seventeen or
eighteen days, and during the winter
months about twenty-five to thirty
days
The trip from New York to Buenos
Ayres, with transfer at Rio de Janeiro
occupies at least twenty-three days. If
close connection is made at Rio. with
a sailing once month only from New
York. From New York to Valparaiso
the quickest possible time would be
about twenty-five days via Buenos
Ayres during the summer months (De-
cenber to April) with close connection
at both Rio de Janelro and Buenos
Ayres. The voyage via Panama takes
twenty-eight or thirty days under ia
vorable circumstances, but 1t is more
likely to require thirty-five days.
Camas Prairie chronicle. [volume] (Cottonwood, Idaho) 1901-1917, 1907-05-03
HOW TO JoURNEY TO CHILE.
Trip from New York Takes at Least
TVveutv-three Days.

Trip from New York Takes At Least
Twenty-three Days.
There is no direct passenger service
to Chile or the River Plata from the
United States Passengers from New
York, for example, wishing to get to
Buenos Ayres, must either take passage
to Rio de Janeiro and there transship
to one Of the European lines touching at
that port en- route to the south or they
must cross the Atlantic and transship
in some European port to steamer
sailing to Buenos Ayres, says the New
York Herald.
If they wish to 60 to Chile they may
go via the Isthmus of Panama, suffer-
ing the inconvenience Of transfer to
the Panama railroad and to one Of the
west coast steamship lines; or they
may go to Rio de Janeiro or Monte
video and there transship to a steamer
OF the Pacific Steam Navigation Com
pany's line running through the straits
to Valparaiso; or they may 90 to Liv-
Camas Prairie chronicle. [volume] (Cottonwood, Idaho) 1901-1917, 1907-05-03

great grief has been that the police
refused to arrest her on the occasion
Of the last outbreak.
THE time for words is passing
away" she said, "and the time for ac-
ton has come"
These and similar speeches fired the
enthusiasm Of the women, and finally
they decided to march to the House
Of Commons to demand votes. Many,
however, baked, and only about 200
Joined the procession, which marched
with arms linked, singing John
Browns Body" The police, on the
whole, were remarkably forbearing and
good humored. Many of them seemed
to enjoy the row.
Camas Prairie chronicle. [volume] (Cottonwood, Idaho) 1901-1917, 1907-05-03
WHEN THE BRAIN IS INJURED
What Happens When 1t Is Pierced
by a Bullet.


What Happens When 1t Is Pierced
by a Bullet.
The consequences produced BY a
bullet crashing into the skull are often
50 difficult Of explanation, according to
the British surgeon, DIR. r. Lawford
Knaggs, that the numerous experiments
made to obtain knowledge of their ma
ture merit the closest study, says Cur
rent Literature. Now there is a GER
tain physical phenomenon so closely as
ISOLATED with the effects Of bullet
wounds that DR.. Knaggs alludes to it
first Of all. In hydrostatics there is a
law known as Pascal's. This law is
that pressure exerted upon a mass Of
liquid is transmitted undiminished In
all directions and acts with the same
force on all equal surfaces, and In
direction at right angles to those sur
faces
The bearing Of this law upon the
subject In hand depends on the fact
that the skull is completely filed with
the contents OF various degrees OF
huidlty. During life the general sum
OF the fuidity is greater than after
death. Thus there is the cerebro-spinal
fluid in the ventricles and In the subar-
acnnoid space. the fluid IN the lynn
phatics and the blood In the vessels.
The brain itself, moreover, is a soft
and viscous substance. The cranial
contents do not constitute uniform
fluid. but we should expect Pascal's
law to apply to them.
The results of firing a bullet at a
Fat brittle bone and into a soft sub
stance like the brain are very differ-
ent. The bone Is pierced and the lat
eral displacement of its particles is
very slight; but the brain is thrown
aside in all directions. The difference
is due to the different degree Of CO.
hesiveness of the particles composing
the two bodies or. in other words. to
the greater fiuidlty Of the softer
structure.
Next the Importance OF fluid CON
Camas Prairie chronicle. [volume] (Cottonwood, Idaho) 1901-1917, 1907-05-03

have always hated hotels, - / lost
no time In looking round Tor lodgings
suitable to my means, and VIZ fortunate
enough to obtain a couple Of rooms In the
house occupied By PRIEST, Father
jacques Bonchretien. He vas very good
Fellow, and though we did not become in
Innate, ! could always rely on his cour-
tesy and friendly serves. Here lived
IN great comfort at an expense Of fifty
dollars a month, apd soon found that
my spare fifty mae me well-to-do man
in Nottingham. Accordingly / had the
entree Of all Ae best houses, including
the Golden B0use, and q very pleasant
little society We had occasional dances,
frequent diEners, and plenty Of lawn ten
mis- and Billiards prevented me feeling the
tedium had somewhat feared, and the
young hdies Of Whittingham did their
best to solace my exile. As for business,
| found the bank doing small business,
but a tolerably satisfactory one, and II
wetnade some bad debts, we got high In
tgest on the good ones, so that, one way
n another, managed to send home pref
~ satisfactory reports, and time passed
on quietly enough in spite Of certain man
lfestations Of discomfort among the popu-
lhtion. These disturbing phenomena were
hrst brought prominently to my notice at
the time when / became involved in the
fortunes Of the Aureataland national
debt, and as all my story turns on this
Incident, i perhaps is a At subject for a
new chapter.
Camas Prairie chronicle. [volume] (Cottonwood, Idaho) 1901-1917, 1907-05-03
NevH MIDI. III Fnr seIIinn.

Two men, about % and ss years ia
respectively, affecting an English ac.
cent and the dress Of petty officers SIS
tied Abraham Greenberg, a lawyer, who
has an office In the Pulitzer building
They were accompanied by negro who
carried large sailors grip.
The men represented themselves as
having just returned from trp
through the Baltic provinces Of Rus
sia.
1--WE got some fine furs would Ike
to sell to you," said the spokesman
1--WE a lot Of bargains, too Then
looking around the room, he added 10
a whisper: Il brought the stun myself
to this country-you understands
The lawyer said he was not Interest
ed in furs, but the man persisted Sc
displayed a handsome bearslrln rug
which he said he would sell for So
Greenberg didn't care to purchase any
furs, but the rug Impressed him y
much that he finally offered $S5 Tor t
This was refused, but the man pro
duced fine silver blue fox nun and
collar.
'I'll let you have this for $50" said
the man.
Greenberg bargained with him ana
eventually bought the set for $50. Hs
thought he had a prize.
Just as he was about to hand the
money to the stranger he found that
the muff was damaged. The man read
lily agreed to exchange 1t and took
what looked like similar muh from
the grip. This looked all right and Was
accepted.
When the lawyer examined the muA
and collar more carefully, however, o.
rubbing his hand gently over the fur i
began to fall out. Greenberg took tie
garments to an expert and learned thas
they were made OF hair dyed and past
ed crudely on a foundation. The value
Of the garments was about $3.50.
Since then the lawyer has heaIa
from other victims Of the pair. Their
game, which is a new one, Is beng
worked successfully in many parts q
the city.-New York Times
Camas Prairie chronicle. [volume] (Cottonwood, Idaho) 1901-1917, 1907-05-03
WOMEN AssAIL co1EMoNa
British Female sunraEists storm
Parliament Houaa.

British Female sunragists storm
Parliament House.
The women suffragists Of London
marched on Parliament recently and
for six hours Westminster was like
a building defended by troops against
an attack from mob. Policemen on
foot In squads guarded every entrance.
Policemen on HORSEBACK In platoons
charged and recharged the serried
ranks Of the undaunted ''suffragettes. !"
Detectives in plain clothes struggled
with isolated groups Of daring inyad-
ers in petticoats Women were knock
ed over, shaken, pulled, and hauled
about. Some were almost trampled
in the mud Flfty-seven of them were
thrown into jail. Immense crowds Of
onlookers surrounded Parliament
house and traffic was blocked for hours.
The women finally were routed with
many casualties, including some cuts,
abrasions, contusions, and great loss
Of millinery, hat pins, hair pins, and
similar light impediments. The vlcto-
rious police suffered some slight bodily
injuries and the temporary loss of
few helmets.
It was to denounce the omission from
the kings speech at the opening ses-
sion Of Parliament Of any reference to
the enfranchisement Of women and to
celebrate the first anniversary Of the
opening Of the, vote demanding cam
paign that several hundred women
gathered at Caxton hall and listened
to fiery speeches by their leaders,
How can we sit IN our Seats" ex-
claimed one of these, while the gov
eminent ignores wOmen7 If all the
women In this hall went to prison to-
night we should have the franchise
tomorrow. Do as you are bid. Fight
for all you are worth, and before next
week we shall have won the battle"
Then followed the aged Mrs. Des-
pard, sister Of Gen. French, whose
Camas Prairie chronicle. [volume] (Cottonwood, Idaho) 1901-1917, 1907-05-03
school Of Navigation.

AS possible stimulus to river cities
in German states, a school Of naviga-
ton has been established at Mannheim
for the purpose Of educating young
men employed on river boats in the
art Of navigation and kindred sciences,
says the New York Herald. The term
lasts about eight weeks In winter,
while the Rhine River is lcebound.
Students are taught penmanship, Ian
guage, arithmetic, geography, CONNER
cial law and everything necessary for
them to know regarding shipbulldlng
and navigation. They must be 16 years
old and must have worked at least one
year on river boat. The tuition fee
is nominal, and for boys without means
entirely free The men generally grad
uate after two winter terms of eight
weeks each, receive a captains patent
from the government after five years
more Of practical service, provided they
are at least twenty years old. Steam
ship companies have agreed to give
graduates Of the school the preference
over applicants without a diploma.
Camas Prairie chronicle. [volume] (Cottonwood, Idaho) 1901-1917, 1907-05-03
Teddvn Hnvo "a.

IT confess I don't like this business
growled one OF the tire-eaters. rhsN
is Teddy McGovern, the creates g
prize fighters; there is Teddy ShonA
the greatest man In Panama, dlggl
the big ditch there Is Teddy Male
the greatest Of theatrical promoi
there is Teddy Ransom. the graai
justice Of the peace in Jersey oiQl
there is Teddy Roosevelt, the oag
President America ever hads there
but forget I'll This country Is run 2
Teddy, Teddy, Teddy. And yet lnel
was no Teddy until Roosevelt '-Nss
York Press.
Camas Prairie chronicle. [volume] (Cottonwood, Idaho) 1901-1917, 1907-05-03

"'Scuse me, boss" said the colored
Individual, as he entered the mer.
chants private Office, "but Abs lOokin'
fob work"
"oh, you are, ehT" reJoined the mer-
chant. what can you dot"
"'Scuse me ergin, boss" said the
man Of color, 'but 1t amt fob mahseIf
Abs lOokin' fob WOrk-it's fob NAH
wife. sab"
Camas Prairie chronicle. [volume] (Cottonwood, Idaho) 1901-1917, 1907-05-03

Sir Lawrence ma-Tadsmqe ~
great picture was exhibited at AntN z
and was offered as one Of the pria {
a lottery. The lucky winner was y
king Of the Belgians
Camas Prairie chronicle. [volume] (Cottonwood, Idaho) 1901-1917, 1907-05-03
Helping II AInnr

Oldham have decided to lay nv
fortune at Miss Dimpleton's feet
Yungun-Well, that ought to make II
a trife easier for her.
Oldham-Easier for her?
Xungun-Yes; to run through IL
Camas Prairie chronicle. [volume] (Cottonwood, Idaho) 1901-1917, 1907-05-03

One isn't necessarily crooked bscsa
be follows his natural bent
Camas Prairie chronicle. [volume] (Cottonwood, Idaho) 1901-1917, 1907-05-03

why does the lake look so blue?"
You'd look blue yourself If you had
to swallow Cuyahoga River water all
the time. "-Cleveland Leader.
Camas Prairie chronicle. [volume] (Cottonwood, Idaho) 1901-1917, 1907-05-03

II some good women don't improve in
their manner Of dress, there are going
60 be some slouchy looking angels over
Yonder-