Los Angeles herald., 1907-04-07
RIGHT AT THE START

A young reader Of The Herald writes
to the editor as follows:
II am about to be married and wish
to start right. Will you advise me
what is best to do about money mat
ters-shall 1 give all my salary to my
wife and let her spend It, or shall foot
the bills and give her pin money only7"
This question is about as important
to society as any that can be propound-
ed. 1t is a very serious question and
deserving Of the most serious consid-
eration. For the effort at its solution
has caused more unhappiness and de-
stroyed more homes than King Alcohol
ever did.
Now, what about It?
The proper answer, as every man of
experience knows, depends entirely up
on the temperament of both the hus-
band and the wife. This is why it is
impossible to lay down hard and fast
rule applicable to any or all cases.
1t is rarely true when young wo-
man should be trusted with the entire
financial management Of a household;
hence It is rarely wise for a young
husband to turn over his entire salary
to her. She may be naturally more
economically inclined than he and yet
lack that perspective which his wider
experience with the outer world en-
dows him with.
There are happy instances where the
young husband and wife have agreed
to split his salary equally, he agreeing
to pay such bills as the rent, fuel and
lighting, while she pays for the sub
sistence. Then ensues @ friendly rival
ry to determine which has the better
financial ability. He clothes himself
and she clothes herself, and whatever
is saved goes to the account of both.
This method has proved Of distinct
advantage, inasmuch as it creates an
equal responsibility. Matters Of larger
determination than mere living ex-
penses, such as buying a lot or house,
must be determined and acted upon
conformity.
Again, there have been happy results
in cases where an agreed sum is hand
ed over to the wife every week or
month. for houshold expenses, she to
possess as her own whatever may re-
main above the payment of such ex-
penses.
The least satisfactory of all is for the
husband to arrogate to himself the
holding and handling Of all his income,
and then doing out to the wife that
which some men designate as pin
ho oI tbic
system to the dark ages, inasmuch as
it assumes the wife to be either a
mere child, helpless toy or an ire
sponsible piece of extravaganza who
cannot be trusted.
Our young friend should understand,
first and last, that the woman he mar
ries presupposes a co-partnership, with
an equal share in life. He should try
to ascertain whether such a co-part-
nership will be followed with equal in
terest, equal effort, equal sympathy,
economy and encouragement. Being
satisfied on this point, there must be
mutual responsibility and trust. If the
first month turns out badly and each
has done the best he or she knew how
to do-dont quarrel about it. Think it
over, talk it over, for nine times out of
ten both have been wrong.
Marital happiness is based wholly
upon mutual forbearance and sympa-
thy. And, after all, advice doesn't go
very far AS a rule young people walk
into matrimony with both eyes shut
and trust to luck 1t is a wise pro- |
vision of nature, perhaps, that luck
stays with the most of them.