Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-11-23
AMT YOU READY YET?
MI r. Jobson vows. vums, AYERS ana
1N swears that Mrs Jobson is never
Ss~ ready to start for the theater IN

MI SwearS that Mrs. Jobson is never
ready to start for the theater In
time.
Tomorrow night" he observed to her
one evening last week. we are gong
to the theater. I have the seats. We
are going to get to the theater on time
Please get that-on time. can't help
it if you happen to be one of these peo-
pie that like to mooch into theater.
for the purpose of trying to make hit,
about half an hour after the performance
has begun. I can't help a lot of things.
But I'm giving you due and appropriate
advance notice this time. We are going
to get to the theater on time tomorrow
evening. If you're not ready when
I'm ready why, that'll let you out, that's
all I go alone and trust to pick up some
friend downtown that wants to see a
show and let him have your seat. l fully
apprehend that you're pretty-er-season-
ed to learn new tricks. But it isn't any
trick at all to get to the theater on time
if you make up your mind to do it. Just
remember all this, will you?'.
Mrs. Jobson said she'd remember.
Something or other detained Mr.. job
son down town on the next evening
their theater-g going evening-so that he
didn't get home for dinner until bit
after half past e. Then he appeared
to be in a mood to dilly daily over his
coffee.
Il don't want to hurry you, my dear
said Mrs. Jobson, but you know we're
going to the theater this evening and
I'm away behind hand already getting
things Strengthened up. and I'd like to
clear away the dishes before"
"Oh. sure enough-theater,' said Mr..
TohSnn ssE'nrOnt all about If Course
I've always got to have theater tickets
when I'm as tired as a dog. But we'll
have to go. I spose. Wonder you couldn' t
have made it some other night"
But" very reasonably put in Mrs. job
son. IT didn't even know anything about
1t till you told me you had the tickets.
and-''
please don't try to involve me in an
argument every time open my face"
said Mr.. Jobsen. IF you think it's funny
and good policy to drag me off to the
| theater every time you catch me all
tagged out from slavish days work,
all right. I've got nothing to say But
you can't spin me around in the vortex
of an argument about it. 1 can tell you
that. Go ahead and have the girl clear
off the dishes. I'm not stopping the
dishes from being cleared Off 1 guess
you'll let me gulp this coffee, won't you?'
1t was after when Mr.. Jobson left
the table to go to the sitting room above,
where he lighted cigar and sat down
with his Star-pape. Mrs. Jobson re-
| NAMED below for a few minutes to super
| intend the tidying up of the works down
there. Then, at about a quarter past
| I. she passed upstairs, saying to Mr..
Jobson as she made for the second floor
Isn't it time you were starting to get
| ready, my dear?'
Just you attend to your own part OF
| the gettfng-ready business" was Mr.. job
sons prompt reply, land I'll see to my
end nf II don't n fzOicr
three or four years getting ready to &c
out for an evenings entertainment
| Doesn't take me jiffy to slide into my
clothes. All you've got to do is to see
| take care of myself thank YOU
Mrs. Jobson hustled around and begar
! to wave her hair. The preliminary moves
which woman has to go through to
| make ready for an evening out take most
of the time. Getting the hair fixed. and
well. getting the face ready, and so on
and so on, form the major part of the
work: slipping the apparel on is the
easiest and the quickest part of it. II
was twenty minutes to s. and Mrs
Jobson, hustling just as much as she
could. was just about winding up the pre-
| liminaries Of her own toilet, when Mr.
Johson clomped upstairs. yawning hor-
ribly
"Well.'' he said. II s'pose I've got to
mop lIltO lIdl lux COHlTdpllON. Say, nave
/ got any dress shirts clean?'
| Mrs. Jobson was fixing the spit-curls OF
her front hair, and was keenly interested
in the job. But she had to knock off to
plough through Mr.. Jobson's chiffonier
| and dig out dress Shirt for him. Mr..
Jobson was slowly removing his work
| aday garments.
Wonder where the DANCED buttons for
that dress shirt are?" he yawned Where
dyou keep EN-. anyhow? I never see ZEN,
around anywhere. Do you hide 'em?"
Mrs Jobson was cutting the ends of
her earlocks with pair of scissors. but
she had to flag that job to get Mr.. job
sons shirt studs-they were in the pin
tray on his chiffonier. where he'd put
them himself the last time he'd go,
through using them.
'Ho-hum," yawned Mr.. Johson. "Td
like to go to the hay, that's what I'd like
to do. Sleepy as a coon on a cotton
wharf. Blame the theater, anyhow. Got
to go, though, I s'pose-a married man S
whole life is one grand game of doing
things to keep his wife from whimpering
that she's abused. Say. how bout putting
those studs in that shirt? I've worked
like an elephant moving teakwood all day,
| and. anyhow, 1 always break my finger
nails off trying to put the studs in those
| blamed dress shirts"
| Mrs. Jobson was trying to put just a
| teenchy- weenchy little bit of penciling on
| her eyebrows, but she had to knock that
| off to put Mr. JobSon'S studs in his dress
| shirt Before starting that job, however
| she had to wash the little stains of the
pencil off her hands in order not to soil
| the shirt.
She had just handed the shirt. all rig
| ged up with the studs and the buttons. to
Mr.. Johson, and was engaged in trying to
| hook her waist up the back-she didn't
dare, at that juncture. to ask Mr.. Johsor
to help her with the rear buttoning-
when said he:
| Forget to change to my pumps. dang
| 1t all! Where are my pumps. anyhow
! Give 'em to the ashman? Or,dd you give
'em to that fox terrier pup next door tc
play with? l used to keep 'em under the
bed. It's like looking for needle in a
whea thin to-"
your pumps" said Mrs. Jobson, des-
perately, still wording away at the real
| buttons of her waist. while her forehead
began to be believed with the perspira
ton of effort-and the dressing room was
! too hot, anyhow-''your pumps ara under
your chiffoner, at the left-hand side
Mr.. Jobson looked up at her sharply
| "Oh, they are, are they?' said he
| well, it's wonder you couldn't turn
over your hand to help me little bit
after the kind of a day I've put in. It's
a wonder-"
To save any more of that stuff, Mrs
| Jobson trudged over to the chiffonier
stopped over, got Mr.. Jobson's pumps,
and handed them to him.
| Its a wonder you wouldn't help me
| tie this fool tie. ] never was intended for
| a pussy-willow of a Percy-boy, and !
| can't make head nor tail of fixing uI
these blasted bow ties
| Mrs. Jobson had to tie his black bow
| Then wal eft TnI,