The Lake County times. [volume] (Hammond, Ind.) 1906-1933, 1907-07-13

couldn't understand and confided TO a /
friend: L believe that son of a gun is /
trying to cheat me. What does all this |
Or. and Dr.. mean, anyway"
Clay dissolved partnership and re- |
turned to his primitive style of book !
keeping. Clay can grasp such simple |
propositions as evolution, the Corey !
Gilman affair and green bugs, but fancy
bookkeeping is beyond him.
Pious Sunday Fisherman.
Deacon Garretson of the Zion church,
who criticised the Hay Press for print
ing so much gossip, scandals and other
rubbish, is taking his annual outing in
northern Wisconsin. Before Deacon
Garretson left he lectured the boys in
his Sunday school class on the sinful
ness of fishing on Sundays.
bod Daniels, who was Deacon Garrett
sons camp mate last year, asserts that
the deacon, when in the wilderness, al
ways fishes Sundays if the wind is right.
Dispute Over Authorship.
Like other towns, Hopkins is disput-
ing over the authorship of the phrase:
Beyond the Alps Lies Italy"
Ole Olson, night cook on the dredge
boat, attributes the saying to Hanni-
bal.
Dan Druff asserts that no one but
poet could have framed the phrase, and
suggests Mr.. Dooley.
Frank Frangipanni, our literary bar
Der, who represents the third ward in
the council, is positive that when Wash
ington crossed the Alps he gave utter
ance to this very expression.
SuTragists Scared by Mouse.
Miss Cornelia Bayrum, president of
the state federation of women suffer
ers, addressed the local club at the
town hall Thursday afternoon.
Miss Bayrum started with the propo
sition that women were mems equals;
that while women lacked their physi-
cal strength, yet in many Characters
ties, such as courage and determination,
they were mems superiors. This senti-
ment met enthusiastic approval from
the gloved audience.
| While Miss Bayrum was celebrating
on these lines some male miscreant
turned a mouse loose in the room. Mrs.
Dan Druff was the first to notice it.
She screamed and jumped on a chair.
| Other women sufferers did likewise
When the poor, frightened mouse sour
ried in the direction of the head woman
sufferer, Miss Bayrum, she vaulted to
a table top, drawing the bottom of her
skirts tightly around her.
The poor mouse, as badly scared as
the women, finally escaped through an
open doorway.
1t took some time for the women suf-
ferers, including Miss Bayrum, to re-
gain their composure. When Miss Bay
rum resumed her discourse she quietly
ignored her first proposition-the in
telIigence and courage Of women. She
lswitched to the political phases of wo-
mems rights.
1t isn't on record where a mouse
ever harmed woman beyond brighten
ling them. Yet, judging from women:
actions, they are afraid of being eater
up. This is puzzling to men.
Live stock Is His Choice.
Mrs. Bill Bitten is having her Bali
Wire row mansion redecorated. Al
Italian from the county seat is doing
the work under Mrs. BIS direction. Thu
bath room is a dream, the frieze anc
ceiling work being particularly arts
tic. In the ceiling center is a eluste
of cupids doing a May pole act witt
} ribbons.
This last is the suggestion of Mis-
Kutshot. whose drawings of cupids
, now being shown in the Hopkins higl
, school exhibit at the Jamestown expo
Isition, are getting deserved admiration
Mr.. Bitten, who formerly ran
? livery stable, says that instead 0
cupids some pictures of horses an
mules pasted on the ceiling. inter
a twined with a few sale bills printed b
! the weekly Hay Press on its new Cor
don, would be more TO his taste TO loo
a at while lying on his back In the bat
|. tub.