The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1907-05-16
SOME NEWSPAPER
CHAFF.

Dlttle Louise, tne daughter OF Mr.
al Mrs. Frederick Anderson. spent
the winter in San Antonio with her
mother. Since her return to her home
In Illinois there has been long term
OF rain ard sleet.
Mamma, what makes us have all
this rain.' asked Louise impatiently.
God sends the rain and sleet and
we must not complain" was mamma's
answer
Let's go back to Texas. where God
don't live" pleaded Louise.-San An
tonic Express.
I'm glad Tommy's been a good boy
in my absence" said the mother.
"Yos. maam." replied the nurse.
I'm glad to see he hasn't broken
anything"
"Yes. ma'am. He only broke two
vases. but | threw the pieces out. for
knew you'd be glad to see he hadn't
broken anything!"-Yonkers States
man.
The democratic manners OF Justice
Holmes OF the United States Supreme
Court. continue to impress themselves
upon the residents of Washington.
The other morning he stood on the
platform of a street car enjoying his
afterbroakfast cigar. when two color
er women numbered on board with
huge wash basket. which they depos
tied at his feet before going inside.
Whei. the car started a piece OF gauze
netting which was over the clothes be-
gan to blow loose and was about to
disappear when the justice grabbed 1t
and carefully tucked II In. One OF
the sable owners remarked to her
companion: For the Lawd's sake,
look at that. Ei he amt fixiL' .
all right Look like his own wife
might "a took in washln hersef!"-
Exchange.
Prof. NJ. T. Pupin. the famous cleo
trical expert, told at the dedicatory
banquet OF the new womans club, the
Colony, In New York, an appropriate
story.
THE excellence OF this repast," he
said. brings to my mind story about
a man whose repasts were by no
means excellent.
This man lived In my native town
of Iivor, and he was noted for his
parsimony. Let us call him Mr.. Smith.
There was an old Major in ldvor
who said to his valet one evening;
Go and tell the cook to get me
ready chop and poached egg
Pardon me, Major. said the valet.
but have you forgotten that you are
dining with Mr.. Smith tonight?
THE Major frowned.
eyes, he said. 4 had forgotten II.
Tell the cook TO make 1t two chops
and two poached eggs Exchange.
=
During the last Mardi Gras festivi-
ties At NEW oll'hHHs 'Ohpi's
" from the provinces. wandered into
one of the numerous little French res
taurants. The lady scanned the menu.
Here's entree." she said. What is
It? Shall I order it,"
Good heavens, no." replied her
companian. i've always heard that
the French eat It: but rot for us.
Youd'd better ordor ham ard eggs. An
entry's race horse. e.'-Lippincotts.
-
The famous Field family, Cyrus
and his brothers and sisters, were
brought up to obey. The father was
a clergyman with $500 year for nine
children. and frugality and right liv'
ing were absolutely necessary. Once
useful rat trap was missing The faith
er gave orders that when It was found
Il should be brought directly to him.
A few days afterward during service,
when the service was In full swing,
there was a Gathering up the aisle. 1t
was two OF the Field boys carrying the
lost rat trap. They gravely set 1t
down before the pulpit. One of them
said simply: Father here's you rat
trap" Then they turned and went out,
Kansas City Star.
An Irishman. who wasn't much OF n
hunter, went out to hunt one day, and
the first thing he saw to shoot at was
a blue jay sitting saucily on the top
Of a fence, He blazed away at the
bird. and then walked over to pick II
up. What he happened to find there
,,,a, n daad frog which he raised care.