The Washington herald., 1907-02-03

such beWitChing little beauty as Spring
ever at his elbow smiling. blushing
laughing, and stabbing him with flashes
from her violet eyes? It was an impossi-
bility. And now January has gone to rest
fOTevermOre.
When Spring has grown to be a full
blown summer girl and winds the June
time roses in her hair, she will have more
discretion, perhaps. But recently she has
needed a chaperon.
TO fully appreciate liberty you must
be deprived of its blessing" says the
Baltimore American. That is something
ike dying to beat the life insurance COM
pany.
A fun length portrait OF President
Roosevelt is to be hung in the Peace
Palace at The Hague. No doubt about
that making them behave.
There is a general but unwholesome
curiosity to know what Admiral Evans
said when ne heard about Gov. Swotten-
ham, says the Philadelphia Inquirer.
Our guess is that it was something rhym-
ing with ham,"
Belgium could beat the United States
on land, says an enthusiastic but mis-
guided patriot of that country. Doing
what; playing push pins?
\ London meteorologist says the moon
Is responsible for the recent earthquakes.
Perhaps the moon fell of the New Years
water wagon with the customary fright
fui bump.
"Turn on more ale" sings a St Louis
poet. VIII nothing ever quench that St
Louis thirst?
a contemporary points out that it was
men like Swettenham who lost this coun-
try TO England ia the first place Per
haps. after all, Swettenham may be a
blessing in disguise.
The Scranton health authorities have
forbidden the hospital nurses 10 kiss the
typhoid fever patients This should cause
prospective patients to carefully avoid
this particular ailment
Billy Sunday. the baseball evangelist.
says he viii fight sin until hell freezes.
and then chase the devil across the ice %
This Is one Sunday that doesn't propose
to stand for his lid being screwed down.
Members Of the Indianapolis Humane
Society object to the secretary because
she IS too pretty. She ought not 20 have
much trouble getting a job with some
other society where they are not 50 Pc
culiarly humane.
The prime minister Of Abyssinia is
called N Ilg;" that is. they call him
that when they have plenty of time.
though il is suspected they have some
cute little pet name when they are In a
hurry and want to save time.
why should grapefruit have a plural?
Isn't one enough for any person to de-
voUT2" asks the Baltimore American.
Oh. but that is a Villainous and humanity
dodge, Suppose a person should happen
to want to devour more than one of the
pesky things?
Evelyn Nesbit Thaw seems. judging by
the printed pictures, TO resemble every
body from Lydia z. Pinkham TO Marie
CoreIli-and they have not finished
"sketching' her yet.
Nevertheless and Notwithstanding. "Sa-
lone is said to have drawn like a cap
slcum porous plaster.
Eighteen inches Of snow in Berlin.
Doubtless Emperor William ordered il
especially for the benefit of his political
foes, the Socialists
So the Corey-Gilman wedding is set for
April /? Most appropriate day in the en-
tire year for it.
THE Sultan Of Morocco will adopt an
entirely new line of tactics against
Raisouli," says "a cable Since he has lust
purchased new automobile, we presume
it will be a gasoline.
"Harriman's methods aired" SAYS a
headline in the New York World. 1t
must have been hard on the neighbor-
hood.
Columbia River salmon has advanced
in price, according to, market report
What's the matter? Has the supply of
Mississippi River catfish run low?
Since the Congressional salary has been
revised by its friends, is the nation TO
expect the friends of the tariff to get
busy?
THE whole trouble with 'SaIome" seems
TO come from the scene wherein Jokannon
refuses to yield to her wooing. She ought
to have known that Jokannon would
stand pat.
The Charleston News and Courier says
it Is possible to make seventy-three diff
fercnt kinds of cocktails with South
Carolina dispensary whisky. II would be
extremely hazardous to dispute such ex-
pert evidence.
Bishop J. W Hamilton was in Kings
ton when the earthquake occurred, and
also in San Francisco when that city
was shaken IN. A little more from the
bishop, and he will be put down as a,
first-class hoodco.