davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11
Rhymes tor I o-Day
A PSALM or LIFE on DEATH.

IN 4 pSALM OF LIfNlD or DEATH.
WHAT Tttn nt.pt,tArM ~, zrt1F
WIZ CAI.T,Isn 49,
ttv.,,,5.1s,
r,,1..s I,..,..., hitcr nllhg a. pel'tioi' WIZ
~. i.ei ma 70 cn!oln the ionslei-
rr-~l1LL. me not, IN winsome numbers
Life ID pleasant past belief.
u have eaten green cuc,ilnbers
Ana my frame is rnclscd With grief
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11
Then She Throw the Steak.
THE CALL OF THE WILD.
[From the Houston Post.

r IousToN's vigllant police departm ent
n has apprehended several Washington.
Richmond and Charleston spies
sketching the pleF,s OF the Houston Ice fac
az any other at twenty cents hundred.
Whenever a Texan happens to visit Rich
mend the people meet him at the station
only to the President OF the United States
and Texans
Thirty cents, may now be defined as 8
small sum OF money which the Houston ball
team Is making the Richmond and Wash
ington teams closely resemble.
The Richmond Tlmes- Dispatch is claim
Union. Delaware was the first State to
ratify the Constitution and is. therefore
tho Oldest State. Virginia was tenth.
Anyway, II the Washington man is fined
that 200 pounds OF tobacco for Sunday VIC.
lation, under tho old Maryland statute. he
can buy that much raw leaf In Richmond
o. Lynchburg for about two dollars and sis
bits.
Nothing better illustrates the popularit,
Q: Richmond's ten;-cent juleps than the pop
topic OF newspaper discussion
Sometimes our citizens who came from
Georgia, North Carolina and Tennessee en-
jov returning to their old homes. but tn
South caroinans and Virglnians prefer TO
| thu most part to remain here.
| The Texas cotton crop will take care o
5000 .o000 900 OF the worlds spare chang
this year. This would be large sum 0
money for Virginia or South Carolina, bu
i. is merely fraction Of what Texas pull
out OF the pockets Of the country for he
uErvaled products.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11
MERELY JOKING.

The Drawback.
What is fame?"
IT'S having all your disreputable relatives
come to the surface and tell everybody who
they are."--Cleveland Leader.
At The Womens Political Education
League.
stella: ''The government is going to pro-
coed against the powder trust
Bella: ut won't find girl who will own
UP to using it."--New York Sun
The Merry N1ngnate.
What OF the ends OF tustice?"
Our idea is to play them against the
middle" responded the trust magnate. with
nal.
misunderstood.
~ shall never forget my excitement
said Mr. stormtngton Barnes. "the first tim'
played Laertes."
did you play Laertes too? You must b,
almost as unucky with the horses a
Charley is!''-Wash!ng ton Star.
Then She Threw the Steak.
Mrs Jawback: "You look tough with
that black eye. Why don't you put piec
OF becfsteak on IT."
what we had for breakfast I'd look darn
ell sight oysher."-cleveland Leader
a Question OF Taste.
II am afraid said Mr.. Cumrox. "tha
thu large sums spent on my daughters mus
ical education are wasted"
But she sings and plays we'll"
YES But every now and then she seem
t. like the same kind OF music that do
| washington Star.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11
An Alleged prcdicnn,ent..

Senator Bacon, OF Georgia, has put
the Southern Democratic situation In
few words. but VAIN perfect accuracy
ocrats in his section Will welcome and.
enthusiastically support a presidential
candidate taken from beyond Mason
and Dixon's line. but that. In order
to effect such a nomination. 1t viii be
necessary to present the name of some
Individual who not only Possesses tho
necessary qualifications, but is wiling
to declare himself as an aspirant.
This is an exact and truthful state
enlightened by a. capable investigator
of local sentiment and careful study
Of the better class OF Southern news
papers, have satisfied us that political
feeling throughout the South is strong
~ averse to a repetition of the bum
ders OF 1896 and 1900 Intelligent men
lDemocracy's only hope OF success lies
in repndation OF the socialistic and
incendiary doctrines of the last twelve
years and q sharp and permanent
divorce from the alliances and attilia-
tions which heretofore have brought
them not only defeat but self-reproach.
And, SO persuaded. what is more nat
Iural than the growing tendency to look
ers, among men whom they know to
| be strong. clean, worthy and courage
Gus, free of all those dangerous talia-
cies which have led them 50 often and
j. \
What the Georgia Senator has said
| Will bear the sharpest criticism. 1t Is
/ true that all thoughtful and influential
/ Southern Democrats would be glad to
lind a standard bearer for 1913 among
their own number. 1t is equally true
that they cannot be expected to take
serious action without some assurance
that it will be ARMED by the object
'Iof their preference. To break the ST.
Hence Of forty years, to throw off the
lyoke Of q conyen.lon sanctioned by
more than a generation of unquestion-
ling observance, 10 denounce super
stition none the less binding because
or morals--these are achievements viz
1Itually impossible In the absence OF
some inspiring initiative. Long inur-
A ed to subserviency. trained to patient
\ acceptance of the inferior position, ac-
lcustomed to sit below the salt at meals
4 and to fetch and carry In the game,
Southern Democrats have become inca
1 OF stoutly asserting. their title to tho
higher part. And Senator Bacon
i speaks with sure knowledge when he
predicts that nothing less than a
Homeric demonstration will loosen
these ingorlous bonds.
Southern Democrats? Possessing every
heartedly refuse to lead? Equipped
Il with valor. brains and steadfastness
,, are they yet content to serve as COM
mon henchnen under mountebanks and
w w Of the Illuminating seryitudej
: Are they like men STEPPED in some
despairing lethargy and sentenced to
, await q, miracle for their emancipa-
tion New j ork Sun
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

Tons Of grasshoppers have been found
imbedded In an ancient glacier of Montana
1t Is estimated that Great Britain spends
s15o.o0o day on theatres
Gamecosks sometimes take to catching,
rice, which they devour greedily.
SIX or seven millions Is estimated to be
tive number OF rubber trees in the Malay
States.
English locomotives. which were built
In the year 1856 are still used on Swedish
railroads,
Ten million people have opened accounts
with the Post-offlce Savings Bank of Eng
land
+ The Government Bureau Of Plant indus
| try finds that ground granite makes excel
lent fertilizer.
Builders in New York city invest $780,
ooc each day In land and nav houses for
apartment dwellers
There is an average OF one child killed
every three days in New York City by be-
| Ing run over by vehicles.
According to a Japanese newspaper. 700
| frogs We're killed and 1000 wounded in
battling among themselves,
great rivers For 500 miles it runs In al
most direct line to the sea,
Lawton Parker has painted portrait Of
Miss Jane Addame. which is 10 be placed
! in Hun House. Chica go,
/ w Bartlett's equestrian stasue OF Lafayette
In Paris Is placed on Its pedestal next octo-
| Der
The father OF Nicholas II. Of Russia
l guided his actions ny the ADVICE OF an
4 America, spirit medium,
The Philippine coal mined at Batan Is
superior 10 the japanese and Australian
coal, which in turn is better than the Pa
c!fc and Alaskan,
a granddaughter ofSlarihaldi who Is a
teacher IN a Methodist Sunday school, well
ocmsd the worlds Sunday school 'conven'
ton to Rome recently.
The Khedive OF Egypt Is going to iLondor
, for a brief visit. He has been often y
England. and was a guest At fashlohaplt
wedding when he was last there
Aladar stolincki, an arihtooratic lienten
ant OF Hungarian hussnr regiment has re
sgned his commission to become an appren
4 tico to pork butcher In BUDAPEST III
says he cannot live on his pay--S4oo year
: The other day at Ald.ershots Tommy AZ
kins had a pageant Of his ow s,, 80,
have been worn In the British army ba
t tween 1907 and 1907.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

A foolish constituency liz the hob
goblin of little minds, 'ndOrcd by
little statesmen, and philosophers
md divincs. With consistency II
grent suul has simply nothing t" do.
He Inuy MS we'll concern himself
with his shadow Oh the wall. Speak
what YOU think now in hard words,
and tomorrow spcnk whit to-mor-
row thinks In hard words again,
though II contradicts everything yon
said Observation-Disclosures.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11
Harris
Anti -Dyspeptic Water
PHONE 4as2,
Morris Co., Inc;

j, a. MOTIFS Co, INc.t
Gentlemen,-I have used the HARRIS
TI-DYSPEPTlC WATER for the past
year, and ] have found 1t very beneficial
to me. BEFORE ] commenced to use Il
/ suffered a great deal with Sick Head
ache and Flatulence Since began to
use 1t have been almost entirely relieved
OF these troubles. | do not hesitate Ia
recommend it to any one who Is suf-
ferer from Indigestion,
B. RAND. WEXFORD
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11
NORTHERN AND SOUTHERN RE-
UNIONS.


Several of our contemporaries South
and North are discussing the remark
Of a man who visited Richmond during
the Confederate Reunion, and who was
in New York later when the Grand
Army of the Republic was paradine
the streets of that city. He expressed
himself as being impressed with the
enthusiasm aroused among the people
of the Virginia capital by the parade
of the Confederate Veterans, and could
not frelp contrasting tits with the in
difference with which the people on
the sidewalks in New York City re-
garded the procession of the Grand
Army of the Republic.
| The New York Times denies that
there is any essential difference be-
tween the people in the two sections.
in Richmond the Times SAYS, the
veterans marched through crowds,
every member of which knew ali about
them and had a personal interest in
what they had done, ' lille in New York
| the spectators were largely composed
/ of people to whom the Civil War is
| merely part of history like any other
| part"
But the Baltimore Sun insists that
there Is a difference, and that the CEN
sus of 1900 tells us clearly what it is.
In New York City" says the Sun, "of
a population of 3,437,202, the number OF
foreigners and those born of foreign
parents was 2,643,957, OF the white
population only 737,756 were born of
native parents, In Richmond, Va, In
marked contrast to these figures, we
: find that in population Of $4,000. only
S,907 were born of foreign parents.
That Is to say that in Richmond nearly
nine persons out of ten are native
American stock, while in New York
only about three out OF ten are Of
native American stock or the people
who gathered from other parts of the
.aSonth To sec the Confederate parade. 1t
is probable that nearly all were OF ma
tive American stock, Among the New
York millions there are multitudes
Who cannot speak the English Ian
guage and never heard of the Civil
War. There are many who have heard
lof the war for the abolition of slavery
whose recreation 1T is to engage In
mabhing negroes and who would, per.
! hans, be entirely willing u see the
/ black man returned to slavery
t The Suns remarks and figures are
pertinent and impressive. hut there Ii
!. another reason Why there is more
- enthusiasm in the sopta oyer the Con
r federate veterans than there Is ii
IN the North over the Union veterans
o,.southern soldiers fought for pr!ncipl
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

Persons wishing 10 communicate with The
Times. Dispatch by telephone viii ask CEN
,ral Tor "4oil," and on being answered from
the office switchboard, win indicate the de-
partner, or person with whom they w'sh
10 speak
When calling between A. NJ ana >
A ~ call 10 central office direct for 4o4l'
composing 4oi2, business office 4V4S'
for mailing and prcss-rooms.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

American home seekers must act
swiftly. Those Korean young ladies,
with the one-week- positively silent
guarantee. are going to be snapped up
like hot cakes
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

Honestly now could you find use for
s29,240,000, supposing that Uncle Sam
should be absolutely graveled to know
what to do with it?
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

"All my eggs are not In one basket
says Mr.. Rockefeller. No. Indeed
Where could you get that-sized bas.
ket?
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

Referring again to the North Caro-
lima boarder who slew his landlady-
could this be another case OF Finnish
diet?
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

Entered January ~ 1908. a, Richmond
Va. as secnnd-ciass matter. anaer act q
Congress OF March s. 1873.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

Possibly those who say that soar
bubble is about the thinnest thing go.
ing have never been to the seashore.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

Isn't it about time that some enter
prising New York publisher was an
nouncing volume on Life on the
Ocean Crime Wave 2"
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

A st. Louis boy is living with only
spoonful Of brains in his head. de-
claims the Terre Haute Tribune. as
though that were anything. Pish. pish,
neighbor. Look at Harry Lehr.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

Judge Lands threatens to take a
baseball bat TO any one who proposes
political Office to him" says the Bir-
mingham Age Herald Well IL the
Judge can't hit any better than some Of
those Portsmouth players, there is not
a thing for anyooiv TO get excited
about
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

Those Georgia prohibitors naturally
decline to be impressed by the feat OF
James B. Duke, who merely pumped o
river dry.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

a woman of 107 attributes her longev-
eity to the fact that she has eaten onions
at every meal for many years. Evidently
the wise lady has confined herself en-
clusively to the docile and sweet man
nered onion of old Virginia. 1t Is
we'll that the article grown In Georgia.
Texas and other States Is positively
warranted to kill on sight at seven
miles and up.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

1t is gravely feared that the an
nouncement that kissing removes free
kles is going to prove a death-blow to
the face powder manufacturers
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

In cases where a bathing-suit Is Q
crime, it strikes us as especially desir-
able that the Justice be blind.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

Leave That to The White House.
After while the Census Bureau may
actually find it worth while to issue a bullo-
tin on liars. near-lars and plain fishermen.
washington Post.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

Mrs. Stuyvesant Fish may attain tc
fame by capturing a Prince OF
Sweden, but Stuyvesant can expect nc
especial distinction from merely stand.
ing around and calling Mr.. Hartman
a liar.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

We were ever reluctant to complain
but If Mr.. Howells is the real discov-
erer Of Henry James. it does seem ur
to him to publish the map.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

a well-known dramatic critic has
married an actress. Thus acquiring
an opportunity to study the question
OF criticism from tho underdog side.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

Governor Odell has had an operation
performed upon his jaw-bone Were
we living In scrlptural times, on the
other hand, some one might be using
the Governors jaw bone for an opera
ton upon somebody else.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11
COMMENTS OF VIRGINIA EDITORS.
4 Square Denl.

4 Square Denl.
We do not believe the people Of the state
want anything but square deal II the
| roads can't carry passengers for two cents
we don't believe the people Will want them
to do so,--Backstone Courier.
Congratulations.
Every modern facility for the publicat ton
| o. q high class weekly newspaper has been
sec ured for the Courier, and will be installed
| within the next few days. and we can SAFE
ly assure our patrons and the public gem
orally that after Dur next issue we will pros
ducs a publication that they will enjoy and be
Justly proud.-scottsville Courier.
Inexcusablc Ignorance.
4 good education in political affairs tends
to make better citizen than the knowled sc
of Creek and Latin. 1t is easy to ACQUIRE.
practically no books are necessary and for
these reasons knowledge OF government af-
| fairs should be universal. If this were true
| AMI every citizen understood the duties OF
| the officials for whom he voted there would
b, fewer men who are morally UNIT or men
| would be better administered. as the oni-
] Gals would be the choice Of an Intelligent
! Emporia Messenger.
The Primary.
Having consistently refused to substant'
! mary. the Courier In it's latest utteranef
makes the astonishing statement that prl
+ mories in general are but the devices o
the seif-constituted leaders with which thu
charge resting on the couriers bare asser
ti6c and embracing all primaries ana al
mankind. we would only say that candidate
must be nominated by primary py con
vention or by clique OF men behind CLOS
ed doors,---Page News,
| &
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

At lola. Neb history records. Mr.
Bryan shook hands with his waitress
You have to be a pretty big gun be
fore you can dare just to give tn,
waitress your hand and let 1t go a
that.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11
rha Retort Courteous,

The ietOrt Courteous.
ENGLAND boasts that 1t does not mix ora
tory In It's murder trials which will be con-
sidered humane by all who have heard
British orat6ry,--Brooilyn Standard Unions
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11
SUNDAY, AUGUST II 1907.
Going Out of Town?

Subscribers who leave the city tenn
porariiy should have The Timcs-Dispntch
mailed them. Actresses VIII be changed
rs often az requested.
You can keep fully Informed about
Richmond affairs only through Inc
es-Dispatch.
Before leaving mail or phone your
address to this office. Phone 4O4l, ShS
Circulation Department.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

watch for Him. But we Will see Him
IL we wait and watch for Him.
n And what say unto you say unto
all, Watch" For at midnight, or cock
growing, or III the morning He may
come!
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

BY Times Dispatch Carrier Delivery SER
vice In Richmond land snburbsl, Manehss-
ter and Petersburg
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11
PERSONAL AND GENERAL.

Gulls are the best weather prophets
And vice versa
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

HOW TO CALL rlMrs-ptsrArcH.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

&Envious contemporaries are busily
circulating a story to the effect that n
Richmond man was recently fined $40
for kissing a. girl against her will.
without knowing the specific facts In
volNed IN the case we denounce this
story as mallciously false. Our thor
ough knowledge Of the ways of Rich
inond men Warrants us In declaring
Without fear of contradiction, that the
gentleman Kissed her aEainst her Hip.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

The Brunswlci Gase;te cxpsnsses the
belief that the citizens Of Virginia are
more interestedfin securing better pas
senger and fteight service than they
are In having the passenger rate rc-
dueed a fraction of q, cont. THAT is
certainly the case with the shippers.
As for the people at large, while they
demand that the railroads shall be
rcasonable|in their charges, they t;e
not so foolish as to want to cripple
the roads ana impair the service for
the sake of getting n slight reduc-
ton IN rates. The people Virginia
are neither idiots nor anarchists.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

Nothing better illustrates the popularit,
OF Richmond's ten-cent Juleps than the pop
ularty in that city OF RED Noseg as
topic Of newspaper discussion.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

THE SOUTH AND THE PRESIDENCY
We print elsewhere an editorial ar.
ticle from the New York sun in which
II tweaka the pride Of Southern Demo.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1907-08-11

Thirty cents" may now be defined as
small sum OF money which the Houston bal
team Is making the Richmond and Wash
ington teams closely resemble
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1907-11-15

Worry OF one sort and another IL
necessary TO the complete health OF
the spirit; worry is as surely related
to content on one side as IL is to mis-.
cry Oh the other. II Is as wholesome
an exercise for the spirit, and as re.
freshing, as the physical exercise
which the man finds so necessary to
his well-bCing. The spirit must have
Its peculiar gymnastics; the soul can.
not afford to become stagnant; its
waters, II one may say so. must be
stirred occasionally If they would be
kept fresh and sweet .--Joel Chandler
Harris In Uncle Remus' Magazine.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1907-11-15

Unclaimed express packages to the
number OF 100 viii be sold by the Pa.
cilic Express Company at Poplar Bluff
November Cd.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1907-11-15
A Paradox in Ace.

AZ an entertainment provided by the
Woman's philharmonic society the
most widely advertised attraction was
a dancer. who. so 1t was whispered.
had become too old to teach in the
public schools and had taken to dane.
Ing for living" That remarkable
announcement drew a crowd OF curl
Gus persons who were anxious to see
what a woman looked like who was
too old to teach but young enough to
practice the terpslchorean art in pub.
lie. Also. everybody wanted TO know
what the topsyturvy age might be. but
OF course. no one found out.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1907-11-15

Fifteen thousand dollars in cash was
furnished by the Poplar Bluff banks
for the purpose Of paying off in the
public works.
Emmanuel Brown of Butler county,
sick with no prospect Of recovery,
committed suicide on the 4Gh by shoot
ing himself through the head.
The Southeast Teachers Associa.
ton will meet at Poplar Bluff Nov
90, 20 aud 80, aud an attractive pro.
gram is being prepared. 1t is expected
that about 4C0 teachers will attend
Contracts were let last week ia
Pcmiscot county for dredging u dis.
triCt; aud the total cost viii b" $780,
600, The work is to hc completed
by January, 1910.
NJ l. Skngss OF Grcen'iIe va.
knocked down in poplar Bluff hy 70
man who, aided by two women,
robbed him of SllS on the night uf
the 2nd. So many burglsries and
robberies have been committed in Pop.
lar Bluff lately that it is supposed there
is gang of organized robbers.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1907-11-15
Despondent Doa a Suicide.

A valuable bulldog belonging 10
John c, Reed, of Binghampton, y Y,
committed suicide by jumping up
against a picket fench until he hooked
his collar over one of the pickets. lie
then swung himself around until the
weight of his body on the leather
strap shut of his wind and he strang.
led. The dog had made a previous at.
tempt to hang himself but was found
IN tip'c and taken from the fence, a.
though he fought savagely while his
owner unlocked his collar from the
picket.