Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1907-05-03
SHOPPING FOR A
TIE WITH A LADY

were matters OF little trouble to me.
The plainest and simplest sort would
do. She affirmed that one could get
anything in Kansas City, even plain
ness and simplicity, if you were pre-
pared to pay for it. The first store we
came to looked good to me, but she
snOrted and passed it. We walked
seven blocks and inspected 70 Win
dows. | am man of simple tastes.
but the lady explained at some length
that that was what allied me. What
needed was completely
We went into the thirteenth store.
The lady went up to the clerk.
SHOW me some ties" she said, i'm
periously. He looked at her and looked
at me. For, for" he suffered.
For wearing" she suggested. ami
ably. tiles to wear, around the col
lar
The clerk overturned display case
and almost tripped over himself in his
haste
What we need at this counter"
suggested, SIS lady clerks"
The Lord forbid sighed the lady,
sitting down.
The clerk came back with several
boxes and opened them. He rubbed
his hands and smiled pleasantly.
"Now, madam he commenced,
these are some of our very"
He caught the CLINT of that cold
beautiful eye and stopped.
Bring MORE" she said
He brought them. And more. And
more. He contrived such a pile that
he had to come in front of his counter
tilted her pretty nose disdainfully.
Are these" she said sweetly, "all
you have?"
mo, madam" he brindled at last,
>Jut they are all we have room for on
that counter"
She flared at that and lifted her
skirt
Come" she said to me. I followed
her wondering where what the clerk
threw would strike me. When we got
outside I protested, or started to. But
she only laughed.
Stupid" she said, 81 didn't intend
buying there. l disliked the look OF
that clerk. Come on"
We went. We passed five other
stores and she decided on the sixth
But before we went in l demanded an
agreement. We had to buy tie.
"Now that" she protested, sis Sc
like a man. You haven't said a single
word to let me know what sort of a
tie you want. And you couldn't have
worn any of those frights that horrid
fellow showed us next door,"
''It was miles away" I murmured
land centuries.
She looked at me critically.
well, now," she said, cooking her
eye at me critically, you are looking
dusty and, yes, your collar is wilted."
rs that all?" l asked.
Dear me, no, was merciful.''
Its a virtue l said, that suits
you. 1t looks fresh
Come on" she said again, and in
we went If it wasn't the same clerk
it was his replica.
"Now, madam" he said, what Gag
l have the pleasure"
Don't be premature" I suggested
He smiled at me.
ITO wait on our customers" he said
sis always a pleasure"
Craftsmanship school," l thought.
81 want a dark green tie," the lady
said, f'aot too dark, mind you. With
a shot silk esfect Now don't bring ,he
a wide che Something that Will run
easily through a follower collar. But
not so narrow that it will tie in a
skinny knot"
The clerk fingered his lips nervous
ly. He hadn't reached that stage in
his craftsmanship course.
But wait" said the lady. 81 think
l won't have it with the shot silk eff
feet Just the plain silk
The salesman went on and consult
ed the foorwalker. They returned
together.
81 fear, madam said the foorwalk
er, that the tie you ask for is out Of
date. If J. might suggest"
3D." l muttered.
81 fall" the lady commented, Ito see
the necessity
The fioorwalker bowed.
Madam" he said, Gin our business
fashion"
Have you got the tie l want?" the
lady demanded icily.
mo"
"Then, bless me, why don't you say
so?"
The foorwalker bowed again.
tried to look stolid and felt fool.
Come" said the lady. Again l fol
lowed
what is the time?" she asked me
-Four o'clock"
Dear me. l had quite forgotten
Take me to Tosti's for cup of tea"
but my tie" l protested.
Can wait" she said.
"And my wilted collar
'Its better than none," said the
lady.-Kansas City Times.
~ Ar,%s~