The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1907-05-12

~ - - 1877
4 red q like Mrs. Leslie CArter's. An
me fr the theayter every night. A box
| II I'd have TO cit IN It alone, though Gawd-
nose II I bad q million I bet I cd get plenty
oompIny.
me With q million an I'd bet I'd fnd out
who my friends is, too. With me It wouldn't
make no difference. I'd be Just the same,
fr I datter myself sven II ] woik ! conduct
myself ut all times like Q lady an money
amt everything.
Eve all dream or this proposition, all the
COILS. Y'see that one there with the specsf
That's Esther. Esther says II she had a
million shed pension every waitress In the
void an do away with women woikin'
ut sech Q perfession.
std be q noble thing. Esther's awful
unselhsh. Whatp N-no, 1 dom know
as they,s anything else I'd do with a mill
ion. whatf Sure. I don't care. Go
ahead an use my name. Maybe some rich
guyu see 1t an like it 90 much he'll say:
We'll, here 1t is But. Say. I bet I know
one thing you'd do II you had a Million
The reporter wal moderately inquiaitlve.
"Quit writin' up fool stunts like this,
said Marie Byzantine Bartholomae, 90 she
took an order for boiled eggs and coffee.
Between subway trains-and the intervals
were usually longer than the schedule
asserted-Miss Dean. just Miss Dean and
nevcr mind the first name. she said, gave Q
monologue on her disposition Of the oon-
ditional million. Everybody who takes
trains ut her station knows that Miss Dean
is the we'll informed young woman who is
on the Job about ten hours . day selling
magazines, newspapers and other ~luxuries.
Sic ~loquiiET:
1T isn't q fair question. Suppose you
went and asked John D. Rockefeller what
he'd do II he lost every cent he had. You
know what he'd cay, and 80 do l.
go to work again and begin all over.
Would he? Not on your Lenox avenue
local. He'd write magazine articles on
How TO Get Rich and Success and How
to Tell the Night Blooming Cereus' and all
that kind Of stuff.
Don't / know7 Don't I read every
magazine every month, and don't I know
the gamer / learn more here in a month
than I did at high school and two years at
college, Watching the people and reading
the papers and the magazines.
at isn't fair to ask what I'd do with a
million. I don't know. I'd probably do
something very different from what I
planned without it, anyway. I know a
few things l wouldn't do hat the real mill
i~onaires do.
81 wouldn't-if / we're a man. of course
carry a burning cigar in the subway cars
and try TO keep it lighted till / got out.
I'd be princely enough to throw 1t away.
Sometimes l think it's just that saving
streak in EN- that made 'em 30 rich, tend
ing TO little things like that.
Another millionaire trick l wouldn't
do-come up to the newsstand and pick
up a 10 CEN magazine and look 1t all through
and then lay it down and walk away. Oh.
there's 80 many cheap g~rafters like that;
window shoppers. l call EN-.
And l wouldn't rush around and knock
women down TO get a seat, the way the
millionaire 'men ] see do. Really. it's a
shame, come Of the things I see right here.
And you can tell a lot about a man just
from his subway manners. Take one OF
those we'll dressed ones coming in with
his cigar all burning like a Roman candle
He'll puff the smoke in a lady's ace and
then knock some one down getting In a
car. / always think that's the way he
must be in his business-selish and any
thing to get ahead.
"A million dollarsi / don't know. hon.
estly. II doesn't seem any bigger than a
thousand to me. know one thing I would
do, though. I'd quit my position here
and write-write for the magazines.
-I'ye read every one for over two years
now, and II l couldn't do better than lots
OF the things l read there I'd SPEND my
million learning how. Really, | would.
Oh, OF course, some OF 1t is fine, but most
Of il IL just slush.
I'm afraid you won't get much out Of
me, because as l told you it's not fair to
ask the question. Nobody would do what
he says he would. Take yourself.
Maybe some time you used to make
81 50 a week and you figured out what you'd
do II you made $25. Did you do what you
thought you would? II you did, you're
the only one
In a rather pretentious apartment house
at Manhattan avenue and Iolst street, New
York, Albert Dell is he who runs the elevator
Albert has ideas on the Immortality OF the
soul, the weather, Toe Cans, national and
civic politics. the servant problem, divorce
the beating Of rugs. the race question and
other things that an enterprising disciple
of the Washingtons-George and Booker
should take an interest in. Albert wal
asked about the million.
For a long time he was deep in thought
so long that his interrogation thought he has
forgotten the question. Then he said:
"Yes, sch. All don rightly know les
what And do wild dat oil millyum dollahs
Aid like Z think il ovah a little, Sch"
Permission was granted.
The days passed, and every evening
Albert was asked whether he had made W
his mind. Each time a new excuse wa'
given. Perhaps it is a superstition tha'
mention OF II would destroy forever al
possibility OF anybody ever coming W
with the money. At any rate, Albert post
poned his final decision daily.
Finally he was allowed three days to write
his answer, for oral discussion Of ii seemeC
to give him stage fright. And this lie whai
he wrote, here's the very note:
DEAR SIR
l had 81 900. 10000 ! would spend it.
yours truly,
ALBERT DELL
Ask twenty people you know what they'c
do with a million dollars and see. how man!
Of them answer the same thing. And Mis-
Dean, the subway newsstand girl, was mos
> nearly right when she said it wasn't a fai
, question.
LAST ONE HORSE CAR.