davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Albuquerque evening citizen., 1907-04-18

Jack the sneeze-weed thrower is the latest freak
the lists for the championship among nuisances
in this country His idea of fun is to obtain admission
to crowded public meetngs-especialy theaters--and
quietly scatter concoction pepper other
gradients collectively known, u seems, "sneeze-
weed powder through the air The result is early
confusion of "kerchews!" followed little later by 2
yndcated outbreak Of snorts bark coughs and aggra
waited sneezes. II ne has been able get
phere thoroughly mpregnated with the stuff, meet
ing is speedily ended and quick adjournment is had
hurredy and in pel-mel fashion to the air.
This joker has succeeded in bringing to quick
precipitate finish three theatrical performances
public speaking and one lecture far.
Albuquerque evening citizen., 1907-04-18

The United States, it is claimed. has during its =
istence little than $500 100000 the i'm
provement its waterways. including rivers and har-
bors. In the meanwhile the railroads represent in
their capital than twenty-six times that
much $4,000, 900. Yet, ]. J. Hill tells
single powerful towboat could prope, on the Mis-
sssippi the equivalent thirty forty train loads.
From these facts beginning ask If 1t would
not be better that the spend another $500.
100000 in the Improvement Of waterways than try
10 the railroads
Albuquerque evening citizen., 1907-04-18

Grover Cleveland replied very tactfuly the
geston that his birthday be made national holiday,
he being the dean of American statesmen and most
distinguished spokesman of simplicity and the outdoor
life" Mr.. Cleveland took the essential part of the
suggestion. the commemoration of his birthday,
but that day be to do honor to the simple
virtues simple pleasures that strength to the
character of American ancestry. We need more
OF those od-fashioned conscientious folk adhere
TO the simple of living and who believe that every
fortune should be earned honestly and fairly by the
who
Albuquerque evening citizen., 1907-04-18

The morning papers santa Fe satellite says that
about the first thing Danny did member of the bu-
of immigration was allow the bureaus secre-
try keep his desk city editor in the Journal office
without charging him for #, saving the
bureau SIS month 1850 for the years. The
Citizen is not prepared to say which Danny did
down the office $3.50 put up the secretary
salary $500. No matter which first, the Who'll,
thing saving the spgot leaking the bung-
hole.
Albuquerque evening citizen., 1907-04-18

The Mesila valley seems TO be having much the
experience the valley below this city
suffering The Las Cruces Citizen says with
the for the present the roads
flooded in many places, much to the chagrin OF
the progressive element most Of whom unused 70
such wreched conditions public highways The
paper adds that drastic viii be adopted
deal with those who persist I'm flooding the roads If Tho
nuisance be continued.
Albuquerque evening citizen., 1907-04-18
story of the Burro and the Alfalfa
Field.

Il had a funny thing happen to me
today. 1t didn't really happen to
me but to a burro. There Is a man
who lives out near the edge of town
about block from where | room
and he has a horse and COW and
calf, He has a pasture back of the
house and il has a lot of clover and
alfalfa i'm it, There is little lot
down by the barn and there isn't any
grass in it, The man keeps burro
i'm that little lot for his boy to ride
The other day, the burro tried and
tried to get over the fence into the
pasture to get some grass. IL would
look over at the horse and the COW
and calf grazing there, and then II
would kick at the fence. If the horse
came near it, the burro would kick
at the horse and squeal until YOU
could hear it all over the neighbor-
hood Finally the burro kicked 50
hard that il broke a board OF the top
of the fence and got over into the
alfalfa field. Instead of eating its
share of the grass and letting the
horse and the COW and the calf alone,
| the burro followed them around, try
Wing to keep them from eating even a
muuthful and squealing ana Kicking
at them. There was a pond at one
end OF the field and the burro got into
| the pond and kicked mud ana dirt
| all over the horse and the COW and the
calf, At first the horse and the cali
/ paid no attention to the antics OF the
burro. but finally the pesky little
| brute kept II up until II was uresome
The horse turned and kicked the bur
ro until he went down ana out. The
| calf prOdded the fallen burro with It's
baby horns and the COW butted the
Albuquerque evening citizen., 1907-04-18

The Elida News Of last week published that the
Frts National bank Of that but progressive town
Roosevelt county had $l3l,392 deposit II also
published that the town had voted school bonds with
dissenting vote. Such things these, occur
ring almost every part Of the territory. tell most
eloauently of New MeNco's growth
Albuquerque evening citizen., 1907-04-18

James Il. Keene. the millionaire banker and
New York predicts that the republican part,
will badly beaten at the election, but eX-
change thinks 1t might be well to wait few minutes.
Very much the state of trepdaton and agitation
Wall street preceded Mr.. Roosevets election last
time and it time after his nomination before
business mind that he should be elected.
Mr.. Roosevelt is very resourceful man and when 1t
reached the critical point carrying his poll
cies he has stuck to party. few individuals
like Hartman and possibly Mr.. Keene have been
personally discounted but the vast bulk of the men in
the line Of business have had special cause of
complain is always within Mr. Roosevelts reach to
speak softly" and when in that mood he has
full winning ways about him. The of his
ing popularity published in the New York Sunday
Times calculated to give the interests that
posing him a few very unhappy moments and perhaps
it may bring them into a compromising attitude. MI
Roosevelt, at all events present has the whip hand
Mr. Keene's provision is hazy
Albuquerque evening citizen., 1907-04-18

The Carrizozo outlook Is authority for the state
that viii have a large sawmill plant,
the mining activities there steadily in
creasng fact Corona IS said to be coming to the
right along Of the good towns of that sec
tiOn.
Albuquerque evening citizen., 1907-04-18
Meeting of Lemon Club.

There was a fairly good attendance
at the meeting Of the Lemon club at
the office of the Morning War Cry
| last evening The important office Of
whole bunch of lemons" was filled
| by Friday, the mud-slinger Little
Danny, keeper of the big plum" was
also present The usual literary
program was dispensed. with, follow
ing the reading and approval of the
minutes. The old officers were re-
| elected by unanimous vote, as fol-
lows:
Whole Bunch of Lemons'-Fri-
| day, the Mud-slinger.
Keeper Of the Big Plum"-Little
Danny.
emon''--Frday. the Mud-slinger,
Just one Plum"-Little Danny.
The following change in the by
laws was made public Immediately
after adjournment:
AN act entitled an act to amend
section 3, chapter 2, Of the bylaws of
the Lemon club:
Section !. Amend section of
I chapter . by striking out the words,
! Any person may be Il member of this
| club and substituting therefor, No
person shall be eligible to member
| ship i'm this club who does not read
| and believe every word published
| every udN IN lnt MbInllS war tfN ,
who is not opposed to everything IA
! vorcd by the republican party, and
who is not In favor of making reform
pay from the start.
1t is understood that there was no
| dissenson over the adoption of the
amendment with the exception Of one
| man, who was handed a black lemon
| on which was marked the figures
| "23," which severed his connection
with the club. Friday placed a small
| COB OF mud upon the members head
! as he passed through the door, in
keeping with the practice of the club
as specified in section % of the by
laws 1t was stated by the officers of
| the club that the member would not
| be missed, as he had been "a disturb
! ing element for some time and the
club was willing that he should with
| draw. The installation of officers
| will take place at the next regular
meeting. and in the interim it wa
announced that new reform togs ano
masks for the officers and members
would be provided and the sam,
charged To- the general expense funt
of the bureau of immigration, al
members of which have now jOine,
the Lemon club i'm order that thes,
two ORGANIZATIONS may work NOR,
harmoniuusly towards common end
The meeting then adjourned in order
that the proceedings might be pre-
pared i'm time for the morning edition
Of the War Cry. The club now has ,
membership nf twenty-three.
Albuquerque evening citizen., 1907-04-18
The Excitement Plan.


The Excitement Plan.
The payment amt so hard"
What terms?"
"A dollar down and a dollar when
ever the collector ketches me-
d
The Roswell Record appears to
take It's cue these days from the Albu-
querque morning paper. The Record
Is an out and out democratic sheet
and the morning paper is tambien.
President Roosevelt has ordered
the secretary of agriculture to see
that all impure whisky Is properly
labeled. No wonder an Atlantic edi-
tor wants the democratic party to in
dorse him for a third term.
AN jes' think, said Bill Foler.'
Them gold darn Chinese he'd invented
gun powder and was shootin' them
selves with Krag- -Jorgensen rifles
afore our foredaddys he'd learnt how
tu shoot straight with a bow and ar
row Now look at EN-"
A Lavish Pourer.
81 need little liquor after coming
from the BATH" said the man who
| finds excuses for drinking.
Hold on there, thought" shouted
[ the ungentlemanly barkeep. you
| don't want one bath right on top of
another one
d
The second fiddle has again
| changed its tune 1t formerly played
| I'VE Won't Go Home Until Morning, -
but the sad, sad strains of Home,
| Sweet Home" now appear to be its
favorite. A little later it may take
up "A Hot Time in the old Town" by
| way of an encore.
Albuquerque evening citizen., 1907-04-18
: The Cubs Corner


X X X y Y x Y = y v " y 2
Judging by the solos of the second
hddle in Danny's bum orchestra, the
wandering minstrel has busted anoth-
er string.
II
a Methodist minister in Richmond,
Ind, declares the Adam story is a
myth. He must have a congregation
of men only
d
That NcwsbOy.
Morning paper, mister; Morning
paper? Today's morning paper with
all of last weeks news in it."
Albuquerque evening citizen., 1907-04-18

II you want results IN ADVERTISING
trv an Evening Cttizen want ad
FEES GOOD. COLD ROOT BEER
AT WAITON'S DRUG STORE
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1907-08-13
Autlurous department.
The UnruIy Office Boy.

To evolve a scheme for the manage
ment of the office boy would be no easy
matter It's a safe proposition, how
ever, never to give more than two
days notice of discharge, writes Mon
tague Glass in Success Magazine. In
that short period he may contrive to
do more damage to your office furni-
ture and injury to your credit ana
good will than can be repaired in a
year. An attorney in moderate prac-
tice, of the writer's acquaintance in
formed his boy that he would dispense
with his services at the end or the
week, and went to lunch, rather proud
of his own temerity. He was mar
ried man. During his absence the boy
discovered that electric light bulbs
screwed in and out Of their sockets
with corollary that when bulb so re-
moved fell to the floor it exploded In
a most fascinating manner.
Moreover, the impact Of such bulb
against the wall Of the office building
opposite produced an explosion twice
as intense as a mere dropping on the
floor. A succession Of them sounded
like a pistol fight of frontier days.
The adjoining streets grew clogged
and traffic was suspended, while the
crowd waited for the bodies of the
victims to be carried out. Instead the
office boy appeared unruffled and deb
onair, although none too gently pro-
PEELED by the attorney in moderate
practice, a trifie breathless and red In
the face.
Many boys, however, are more liter
al than Hamlet's gravedigger. The
writer once entered an Office occupied
only by a small youngster, whose hair
rose mlstily above his broad collar
like a cloud on Fujiyama.
'Is Mr.. Smith in?" he was asked.
mo, sir; he is not, sir" he replied
in a scared treble.
do you expect him in soon?"
mo, sir: 1 do not. sir" was the an
swer
We both remained silent.
ITO tell you the truth, mister ne
proffered, in a sudden burst of conf
dence. you have made a mistake. His
office is next door,"
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1907-08-13
TUESDAY, AUGUST 10, 1907.
STATE OF SOUTH CAROLINA,
County Of York.
IN THE COURT OF COMMON PLHAs-
Mary A. Brian, Plaintiff, v. Elwood F.
Bell ct al, Defendants.
ORDER.

Mary A. Brian, Plaintiff, v. Elwood F.
Bell ct al, Defendants.
ORDER.
I T appearing that Aaron w. Brian,
Il one Of the defendants, who in his
lifetime filed his answer in this action,
has departed this life, 1t Is, on motion
Of Geo. W. s. Hart, Esq, plaintiffs at
torney, ordered that the action be con-
tinued against his heirs, known and
unknown, and that this order be served
upon them by publication thereof,
once a week for six successive weeks.
In the Yorkville Enquirer, newspa-
per published at Yorkville, 8. c., and
by enclosing a copy Of the order, in an
envelope securely sealed, postage pre-
paid, to each Of the following per-
sons, to wit: ]. F. Brian, Geo. M.
Brian, Mrs. N. N. Brian, II. D. Brian,
c. M. Brian, Blank Brian, Talmage
Brian, Eta Brian, Sankey Brian,
Timothy Brian and Mitchell Brian, at
Firms, Arkansas; Mrs. Ida Elliott, Ell
liott's, Arkansas; ]. w. Brian, r. +.
D. No. /, Camden, Arkansas; ]. B.
Brian, Camden, Arkansas; Aurelia
Brian, Infirmary, Little Rock, Arkan-
sas; Alice Brian Peurifoy, Camden,
Arkansas; and Ben. Brian, Woodlawn,
Arkansas. And it is further ordered
that ]. s. Brice, Esq, be and he Is
hereby conditionally appointed the
guardian ad litem Of Talmage Brian,
Sankey Brian, Eta Brian, Timothy
Brian and Mitchell Brian, to represent
them In this action, unless they, or
any Of them, secure the appointment
of some other person to represent
him, her or them, on or before Sept.
10th, 1907; and the publication Of this
order and a mailing of a copy to them,
"a copy to each-shall be taken as
sufficient notice to them, and each Of
them, Of the said appointment.
JAMES ALDRICH,
Presiding Judge.
July 9th, 1907.
55-65 6t
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1907-08-13

CoMFoRTING.-A lady who had re-
Gently moved to the suburbs was very
fond of her first brood Of chickens. Go
ing out one afternoon, she left the
household in charge of her S-year-old
boy. Before her return a thunder
storm came up. The youngster forgot
the chicks during the storm, and was
dismayed, after it passed, to find that
half Of them had been drowned. AL
though fearing the wrath to come, he
thought best to make a clean breast
Of the calamity, rather than leave II
to be discovered.
Mamma" he said contritely, when
his mother had returned-"mamma, six
Of the chickens are dead"
Dead" cried his mother. six!
How did they die?"
The boy saw his chance.
81 think-I think they died happy
he said.-Harper's Weekly.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1907-08-13

On COOP AUTHoRITY-A certain
Boston man doesn't go to church Oft
en-, but a week or so ago he was per-
suaded by his wife and they attended
services together Upon their return
home he regarded her with teasing
look and asked:
Nov. look here. my dear: which is
the worst, not to go TO church at all,
or to go and pay absolutely no atten-
ton to the service?"
III you mean that for me | think
you are horrid." she replied.
well, you didn't; you were looking
at all those diamonds the woman in
front of you had on all the time"
For an instant she blushed, for she
is an honest little woman. but quickly
recovered her poise.
"Oh. WELL suppose l was" she re-
torted; didn't you ever hear of ser
mons in stones ?"-Harper's Weekly.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1907-08-13
STATE OF SOUTH CAROLINA,
County of York.
COURT OF COMMON PLEAS.

Jane E. Templeton, Sarah B. Temple
ton, Catharine L. Templeton, JOS
eph W. Templeton and Margaret A.
Carson, Plaintiffs, against w. A.
Templeton, M. Templeton, Damaris
Templeton, .Tirzah Dickson, Eliza
beth Gettys, Harriet Davidson,
John M. Templeton. Lorena Lowry,
Laura Templeton, Jane Templeton
and Mollie Templeton, and the heirs
at-law of A. E. Templeton, names
and residences unknown, Defend
ants.-Summons for Relief.-(Com-
plant served).
To the Defendants above named:
VOU are hereby summoned and re-
i quired to answer the Complaint In
this action, Of which copy is herewith
served upon you. and to serve a copy
Of your answer to said Complaint on
the subscribers at their Office In the
city Of Rock Hill, 8. c., within twen-
ty days after the service hereof; exc
elusive of the day Of such service; and
II you fail to answer the complaint
within the time aforesaid, the plaint-
IFS in this action will apply to the
court for the relief demanded in the
complaint.
Date, March 9Th. A. D., 1895.
WILSON & WILSON,
Plaintiffs Attorneys.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1907-08-13
Tangled.


Frederick of Prussia had a great ma
MIA for enlisting gigantic soldiers into
the Royal Guards, and paid an enor-
nous bounty to his recruiting officers
for getting them. One day the recruit
ing sergeant CHANGED to espy Hiber-
nian who was at least seven feet high;
he acco Jted him in English and pro-
posed that he should enlist. The idea
of military life and a large bounty so
delighted Pat that he Immediately con-
sented.
But unless you can speak German
the king will not give you so much
"Oh, be jabers." said the Irishman,
sure, 1 don't know a word of Ger
man."
But" said the sergeant, ''you can
learn in a short time. The king knows
every man in the guards. AS soon as
he sees you he will ride up and ask
how old you are; you will say '2T In
German: next, how long have you
been in the service; you must reply,
Three weeks; finally. as to whether
YOU are provided with food and cloth
es, you answer Both
Pat soon learned his German answers
but never dreamed of getting familiar
with the questions. In three weeks he
appeared before the king in review
His majesty rode up to him. Paddy
stepped forward with present arms
How old are you?" said the king.
Three weeks" said the Irishman.
How long have you been in the
service?" asked his majesty.
"Twenty-seven years"
Am 1 a fool or are you?" roared the
king.
Both" replied Patrick, who was i'm
mediately sent to the guard room, but
pardoned by the king when the latter
understood the facts Of the case.-La-
dies Home Journal.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1907-08-13
NOTICE OF APPLICATION
FOR FINAL DISCHARGE.

7 HAVE this day filed in the probate
i court for York county my final re-
turn as guardian for ELLEN ELIZA
BETH GILBERT, and hereby give no
tice that on FRIDAY, AUGUST 23RD,
will apply to Hon. l.. r. Williams,
Judge of said court, for a discharge
from all further liability in connection
with said guardianship.
w. w. LEWIS, Guardian.
Yorkville. S. c.. July 19, 1907.
SO t st
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1907-08-13
DUE WEST FEMALE COLLEGE
WEST. 8. G..

m HE ideal place for quiet study,
l. thorough work, sweet Christian in
fluences, and kind personal oversight.
attendance last year.
Greatly improved facilities. New Car
negie Hall with elegant accommoda-
tions for 100 boarders. Electric light,
steam heat, complete water works and
sewerage, Delightful climate and
splendid health record. The very best
for the least money. Beau
tiful catalog. The presidents address
till Sept. 1st, will be
Rev. JAMES BOYCE,
Montreal, N. c.
60 TT Pm.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1907-08-13

To the Heirs-at-Law Of Amos E. Tenn
pleton, deceased:
You will take notice that the Sum-
mons in above action, Of which the
foregoing is q copy, together with the
Complaint therein, is on file in the Of
fee Of the Clerk Of the Court Of Com
mon Pleas for said county and State.
at Yorkville, 8. c.
WILSON & WILSON.
Plaintiffs Attorneys
b7-67 st
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1907-08-13
GASTON.

Gastonia Gazette, August 9: Six
annual Sunday school picnic at New
Hope church, in this county, Tuesday.
| A sumptuous dinner was served on a
| long table on the grounds, there be-
| ing a great abundance for all present.
In the forenoon there were short ad-
dresses by Revs. G. a. Sparrow of
Union, r. A Miller of Lowell, and
]. B. Cochrane of New Hope. Pre-
| ceding the addresses was a singing in
which q large number participated.
In the afternoon there was a meeting
Of the ladies' missionary society of
| the church. There was also q baseball
game. The day was most enjoyable
one throughout. Among the Gaston-
| ians present were Mr.. w. B. knight,
| Mr.. G.. b. Armstrong and Mr.. f. H.
| Rankin. When approached on
the subject yesterday afternoon Agent
| G. M. Nolen said that he had received
no official notice to the effect that
| Nos and s on the c. & NV. were
| to be taken off. 1t is generally under
/ stood, however, and on pretty good
authority. that these trains will be
taken off before very long. 1t is an
acknowledged fact in railroad circles
| that these were not paying trains
even before the two and a quarter
cent rate went into effect. They were
a great convenience and the travelling
public will regret to see them taken
| off. 1t is learned that these trains
| will be kept on till the first of Sep
| tember.. ......A party composed OF
| the following GastOnians will leave
| Tuesday for jamestown, to see the eX-
position during North Carolina week:
| Mr. and Mrs. r. l.. Swan, Mr.. and
Mrs. j. X. Dixon, Rev. and Mrs. +. l..
Balm, Mr.. II. +. Forbes and daughter
of Crowders Creek; Miss Ella Brad
ley, Mrs. K. J. Groves, Miss Jennie
Burns of Richburg, :. c.: Mr.. w. Mac
| Wilson, Mr.. Eli kendrick and 'oDa-
| bly, Mr.. Robert w. Adams. 1t is prob
| able that quite number OI other
| GaStonians will also take in the expo
stion next week. Mr.. Swan will go
from jamestown to New York and
other northern markets to buy fall
goods; Mr. and Mrs. f. l.. Balm will
extend their trip to New York and
Niagara Falls and other points. ......
Agent c. NJ. NOlen of the Southern
and G. & NV. railroads, is having
regular hOuSe-cleaning at the freight
depot He is rearranging the record
files so as to let them occupy as little
space as possible. He is also fixing up
his private office on the side next to
the railroad. Last week new flooring
was laid over almost the entire plat
form and the building was repaired.
The painters will be along at an early
date; after they get through strangers
may think Gastonia has new depOts
| whether she has or not. Some re-
pairing has been done at the passen-
ger depot this week also, including Il
Encouragement of the ticket office.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1907-08-13
BOILINGSPRINGS HIGH SCHOOL
SHELBY, N. G.

Has Determined to Be One Of the
First Class High Schools Of the State.
The building and equipment will be
first-class in every respect. The
Course of Study will be exceptionally
good, leading to the Junior class of
the colleges. Young men and young
ladies will be well trained for the or
dinary vocations of life. Separate dor
mitories. Board at cost. Fall term
opens October 1st, 1907. Prospective
students should write at once for par
ticularS to
j. d. HUGGINS, Principal,
Shelby, n. G..