Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-10-12
JOBSON'S TOPCOAT
IN the first of the chilly Sundays
said Mr.. Jobson to Mrs Jobson, af-


Say, wen take walk along Connec-
ticut avenue this afternoon and look 'em
over Fine bracing day. By the way.
what's become of that topcoat of miner
Mrs. Jobson looked puzzled for mo-
ment. which caused Mr.. Jobson to jump at
conclusion.
triumph in his eye. so you've sold that
topcoat of mine, have your"
Mrs Jobson went through the starting
motions toward saying something. but Mr..
Jobson was too elate in the joy of having
something on he- 20 permit her even to
begin.
Got rid of the only decent warmth
giving garment I've got, have your! he
grouched. beginning TO stride UP and down
the dining room carpet. Il suppose you
slipped 1t to some bushy-bearded peddler
that came to the door, for the price OF a
bargain matinee ticket, hey? Or maybe
you gave 1t to him for patent -beater
and a lamp chimney? And say, why the
dickens didn't l hear about this before,
hey?"
Mrs Jobson was doing her best to get
in some sort of a remark to switch him,
but Mr.. Jobson Is generally pretty well
wound up when he starts anything ON
Sunday morning.
TITS a wonder to me-" he went on. still
clomping up and down the room, that
YOU don't have these grabbenheimer
sharps coming around to this dump at
night, SO that you can sell 'em the clothes
have to take off in order to get into
bed. What the
But Mrs Jobson had reached point
where she declined to be denied Just one
little word.
your topcoat is still in the house" y
she said, quite animatedly. 1T has not
been sold. Why don't you wait till you
find out about things before you begin to
storm aroundT
Mr.. Jobson stopped in the middle of a
stride and regarded Mrs. Jobson with an
expression of the most extreme disap-
prevail
.'Thatn be enough for you. madam.
he said, hoarsly. ''Thatu be about all OF
the henpecking business around here. II
you please You can't start anything with
me on Sunday morning and get away
with 1t. Not much. I'm all through with
this business Of being nagged and sat
down upon around here every time l SO
much as open my mouth. I come pretty
near having a right to talk and when l
give utterance to a few mild and perfectly
proper expressions Of expostulation over
your habit of peddling my clothes 10
these basement door- !, .ou"
But you're all wrong about 1t, say,
put in Mrs. Jobson, still with ANIMATION:
II haven't sold your topcoat.. l haven
sold a single thing Of yours Tor years
and years, and I never sold anything
that was worth hav'ng g. ar sa'd Nh tre 5ohson
with renewed asperity. Il spose your
tack now is that that topcoat OF mlne'
even II you haven't got rid OF II IN ex
change for a fve-cent soup iadle, Ism
worth having around the placer - 'ha'
it?' ,o.,
..rhat," promptly replied Mrs. Jobson'
.is exactly It, Precisely. Absolutely II.
Your topcoat is only fit for the ragoag e:
You must remember that you got II II. at az
Last six autumns ago, and that you nave
worn it steadily all the chilly days since
then. and often during the winter TOO, on
the less cold days. So that 1t is no longer
ut to be seen. .,.,,+
what's fit to be seen and what isn't, hey!'
said Mr.. Jobson. We'll, you'll permit me
TO inform you, madam, that I'll just re-
tain the right to judge for myself as 10
what's fit to be seen In the way OF ap-
running that end OF it. You can do the
Judging for your own toys, but m the
boss Of what I've got to wear myself, ana
you want to get that idea fxed In your
head ..,.
you insist on wearing the greasy. frayed
old thing. why. nobody can stop you, OF
course. I shall go upstairs and get 1t Tor
you to look at"
That's what you ought to have done in
here and trying to bully and hector and
browbeat me over IT, said Mr. Jobson
,.And never mind those. cracks. either,
about my greasy garments. and all like
that. If there's anything greasy about
that topcoat, s'pose it can be cleaned
can't IT. s'pose you know that there
are such establishments On earth as clean
ing places, don't you?"
ooh. yes" said Mrs. Jobson. but that
topcoat has been cleaned and cleaned and
cleaned, till there's hardly anything left
of it. wish you'd not wear 1t, please"
Wear lit" said Mr.. Jobson. why
shouldn't wear it? Say. what do you
Bumjaub or the Mimi Of Novgorod. that
I can be whansing around buying top
coat every twenty minutes or SO just to
please you? I've got to wear a hull heap
Of things that don't want to wear. It's
and wear 1t a couple of times and then
chuck 1t or give 1t to the dinge maid. But
look who you are! And you don't have
to go out and hustle for the coin to get
your dresses, either, which makes q diff
ference. Just get that topcoat out. II
you please, and I'll wear 1t this afternoon
when We go walking"
So Mrs Jobson went up to the attic and
brought the punkerino old topcoat out Of
the moth balls. It was all that she said
of 1t. and more. Mr.. Jobson had quite
forgotten that he'd declared. way last
spring, tnat ne WOulQnt ever be found
dead in that topcoat again, and Mrs. job
son has got all over that habit of remind
ing Mr.. Jobson Of the things he has said.
But she brought the topcoat down to the
dining room, holding 1t by one finger very
gingerly.
You can see for Yourself" she SAID
that It's really not-er-fit-''
oh, you could stand there a week and
pick haws In 1t just because you're on
record that you didn't care for the coat"
said Mr.. Jobson. 'But you can't disgust
me with IT just to make good your first
crack about 1t. I like It. All 1t needs is
Mttle pressine-T spose you could heat
and iron ana spend about two minutes
away from that tittivating novel you're
reading to run the iron over 1t for me,
couldn't you?-and It'll be just as good
as new. Anyhow, when 1t comes to that
madam. I am no Willie-off-the-Pickle-
Boat that's got to vamp around in shiny
dead-new toys every time the season
shifts around. I'm not trying to kill 'em
dead and make hit around this town
doing the pretty-boy gag. Just you press
that topcoat for me, and thatll let you
out Of the arrangement"
Very gingerly, again. Mrs. Jobson took
the gummy old topcoat to the basement
and did the best she could with 1t, not
only pressing 1t, but using ether and
things on the ineradicable spots. And
when they were ready to go out for the
walk on Connecticut avenue after dinner,
Mr.. Jobson put the topcoat on, looked at
himself approvingly in the glass, and
protested to be tickled to death with
the looks Of it although the shrewd eye