Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1907-02-21

admit that any other surpasses him in skill.
He conducts his practice As a business, instead
of as a profession and every minor case he
chances to treat is exaggerated into a grave
malady which none except himself could man
age. He speaks disparagingly Of his super
iors in the profession, especially when they
reside in his own community. He frequently
reminds his friends that he graduated from the
same school that DR.. Regular did but he fails
to explain that he himself was classed as a
black sheep in the fold. He is continually
casting reflections against other doctors, as
though he is the only one competent to adj
minister to the sick and he will allow his
dearest friend or relative to die under his own
unskilful treatment, and will see the victim of
his ignorance buried beneath the cold clods
of Mother Earth, rather than confess that some
other might be able to suggest a safer method
than his. He pretends to be Irregular" and
scorns the very idea Of other doctors adver-
Using, but in som way, every important case
of his own finds its way into the newspapers;
even the advent of every e%ight-pound infant
where he oficiates, is published as "a twelve or
thirteen FOUNDER" He is not to be trusted,
because he is a professional knave and fool,
and does not know it. But, after all, he is
better than the Wonder Doctor.
The Wonder Doctor.-The average Wonder
Doctor never saw a medical school, and is to-
tally ignorant of the moral principles taught
there. He usually prepares himself for his oc-
cupation by buying, or begging, a few recipes
from some druggist, who takes them from his
prescription-fle. Or he may have acquired a
smattering knowledge Of some ''fad' or false
theory, called '~'scicnce, magnetism, dogma
tism, opathy or sophism." Or he may be in
genious and cunning enough to invent a new
name, method or scheme by which he can de-
ceive and cheat helpless and ignorant suffer-
ers. In either event he is a good trader, and
knows how to talk the weaker class into try
ing his treatment. His extra fine clothes, his
large hat, his naughty demeanor, and the i'm
portant manner in which he talks, has a
charming influence over the weak, who can
not discern that his hat is empty, and his
heart is Invested of all manly principle. Then,
here comes the startling reports in the news
papers, of his magical and wonderful cures.
These reports are indeed marvellous, because
he wrote them himself, and paid the newspa-
per man for his space and ink. The newspa-
per man is not to blame, because it is a part
OF his business to sell advertising space. He
has a family to support, and as he is not an
UNA -, .l,,:o >~ - .,ol:1a1 a.I;,, - g.,
not his duty to Judge as to the ability Of such
patrons, any more than it is for him to say
whether or not the merchant who advertises in
his columns, really has the goods, which he
claims is all wool and a yard wide. The re-
sponsibility rests upon the advertiser and his
customer and not upon the newspaper man.
How can the newspaper man afford to ques-
ton the ability of one whom he does not
know, when some of the Wonder Doctors pa
tents have been deluded into believing that
they have been cured OF an incurable disease,
or Of a malady which they never had and
have signed and sworn to the unreasonable
and false statements written by Doctor Won
der, who makes it his business to extract dol
lars and cents from. incurablcs by insuring. and
guaranteeing speedy restoration to health and
vigor. without the knife and without pain.
Hes a wonderful wonder, he's a wonderful mani
He cures where Others can't, and where others can't he
He cures without neans-surgeryh he does spurn!
lie pretends to know all things, bu, where did he Learnt
The best safeguard Of the people against the
impositiors of the Wonder Doctor, the quack,.
the ,charlatan, the humbyg, the fakir and the
patent, medicine fraud, IS to educate them
selves upon the subject by reading good liter
ature, and by listening to. he advice of the
IrIle PhuCi. i'm u,hn naakac-si bic hIlSinecS 70