davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
DIR. ChnnceIIor,S Failure.

From the New York Evening Post
DR.. Chancellor has had a considerable
reputation in the educational world. and
undoubtedly found the school conditions
in the District very different from. and
more trying than, those he had been ac-
customed to in Paterson and elsewhere.
But it has been evident from the begin
ming that he was a misfit in his present
position, if only because the whole sys-
TEN has been in perpetual turmoil from
the very beginning OF his superintendency.
in which the race question also was made
TO appear. His resignation would open
the way to the reorganization Of what
ought to be the model school system of
the country.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
piOuS Frauds.

The time-honored church fair oyster
supper and bazaar are institutions so in
tricately interviewer with the warn and
woof Of our civilization that II would he
folly to dispute their entirely honorable
and legitimate standing. even were we
Inclined so TO do. which. most certainly.
we are not, We should not be frank and
conscientious, however. did we not raise
In protest a voice against at least one
OF the innovations now sought to be in
augurated by a misguided congregation
in Massachusetts.
Says the Rochester Democrat:
a church near Boston advertised that the eir,
Of the congregation would wear blooners at A
church supper. The crowd Of men who bought
tickets TO see The girls boomers. saw only bloom
ing chrysantheHums worn as bouquets. Isn't this
pretty near the limit FOR a church,"
Clearly this is nature taking entirely
without the limit-as our contemporarv
suggests. Money obtained by such a
scheme is close akin to base and ipnobIe
cheating and swindling and surely should
be classed as tainted The oyster stew.
able 20 boast only one lone. Iank. and
lean bivalve. is an institution of excessive
honesty beside this other reprehensfble
thing. while the chicken salad manufac-
tured almost exclusively Of diced veal. Is
in comparison all that it should right
eously be Parties attending church fairs
expect 10 be held W. more or less. by
pious frauds-especially Of the female
persuasion. They are willing to pay
dL49 for $l.07 worth OF lunch. They are
gleefully satisfied TO pay % cents a catch
for minnows in a two-cent fish pond
They understand that their financial loss
Is the heathens spiritual gain-hence
they count not the cost.
When. however. il comes TO such meth
ods as those exploited at the Massachu-
sets social function aforesaid. we draw
the line and chime in behind the Roches-
ter Democrat with the query, pithy and
pertinent, Isn't this pretty near the
limit?" Indeed. it IS away beyond the
limit, the average man viii think. II
savors of gold-brickishness in its most
annoying and distressing garb. 1t is cal
culated TO shake the faith OF man in
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

womankind and church fairs forever. II
is apt 10 SOW seed of doubt all but inn
possible to get rid OF.
Il is TO be hoped our churches gener-
ally will frown down, sternly and en-
phatically. all such progressive" ideas
and suggestions. Man-mere man-is a
gentle and easily tanned biped. when han
died with discretion. but there Is limit
beyond which even the gentle hold-Up
fear to tread The church fair promoters
should not kill the goose that lays the
golden eggs.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
No Doubt of IL.
The Gypsy Curse.

From the Emporia Gazette
Friday is the weekly fraud; everything
goes wapper-jawed; and the sailorman
who sails finds himself food for whales.
and the man who killed a friend. on a
Friday meets his end: on a Friday trade
IS slack, all the trains run OFF the track;
William Doe. to his amaze. draws $40 and
ten days; brickbats fall from buildings
high, break your neck and make you
cry; fevers. fires, and frosts abound
earthquakes come and snort around. Old
Subscriber, in a pet. comes TO swear at
the Gazette; every one is feeling blue
everything is hind-end to; yet some COM
fort we may seek; Friday comes but
once a week
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
THE MUSINGS OF ARROYO AL,

Il seems 10 NE this life we lead
Is Jest ike that in Cattle Land;
A few Wild critters viii stampede
A quiet and contented band:
And find out what the trouble was
You can't. because there amt no cause.
One bawlin' cTitter I'm the herd
Kin do much damage on a drive;
His lOcOed doin's is absurd.
And at the market-man alive!-
That critter that has scairt the bunch
Don't fetch enough % buy lunch.
They has 10 b.. it seems 70 me.
These iocoed steers and locoed men.
But think how easy HE'D Be
II. when they bawl and baEl again,
The hcrd'd stand there. rs it shud.
And Jest take fresh holt on its c1d
denver Republican
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
Connecticut Not for Inf,

Prom the Hartford Times
II makes no difference what the gentle
man IN the White House may wish-it is
not possible 10 set an instructed deiega-
ton for Taft or anybody else in Con
necticut. under the present conditions. It
seems to US that an expression in favor
of Hughes OF Cannon would come nearer
TO representing the real preference Of the
thoughtful Republicans of Connecticut at
the present time.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
AnnuaI Governor.s Meeting..

From the Columbia IS. c. State
The meeting Of governors IN Wash
ington next Nay by invitation OF Presi-
dent Roosevelt should be held annually.
Such a yearly conference of the chief
executives OF the several States would
prove Of benefit 10 the whole country.
and would tend to increase the power
or the States
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
He Meant Business.

Your sign states that you sell pure
drugs. toilet preparations, an maga-
zines"
Well. sir. IL you want 10 poke fun at
my sign"
But / don't Gimme one Of them pure
magazines. I'm tired or the muck
rakin' kind
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

"A theatrical company playing The
Trust Buster has had 10 disband for lack
of patronage" says TIE Hartford Cour-
ant Nevertheless. trust busting Is still
one Of the leading comedy roles Of theat-
ricai politics.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
IndlspensnbIe.

Minors from of the stage must get.
IS now the roar.
No more Wen have the actorette
In pinafore.
The news will make the playwright wild
What can he do without "the che-ild?"
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
Anything After That

From the Chicago Post
We never expected TO live TO see the
South American republics conferring over
peace, but We can keep a straight face
over anything after The Hague per-
formance
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
a JoIt tn Romnncr.

Perseverance viii nearly always win
a woman" murmUred the poet.
Right you are" responded a brisk
citizen. Five out Of six women I have
proposed 70 have married me. How's
that Cor an average, old hOss?''
But the poet frowned and walked away.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

Gen. Pfiugg. the Russian soldier who
figured in the japanese Russian dis
patches early in the war, but was later
succeeded by Gen. VazilizvOvski. has once
more appeared In the Iimelight We are
glad Of this, for Phugg was one Of the
bright spots in the news service for the
proof readers and linotype operators.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

What is most needed Just at present
IS that our citizens should realize how
fundamentally sound business conditions
in this country are" No Mr. Rockefeller
didn't say that. nor Nj Hartman, nor
any other undesirable citizen The Presi-
dent of the United States said IT,
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

"The Atlanta Constitution paragrapher
writes of jig-time. Must have been a
typographical error. Jug-time is perhaps
what he wrote" says the Jacksonville
Union. Or jag-time, which is
SYNONYMOUS
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

600, says he cannot remember anything
about it," Perhaps twenty years or so
in the penitentiary would afford him the
proper chance to think IL up.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

The German Emperor recently shot over
700 pheasants during three days hunting
Evidently his majesty hasn't read the
last bulletin from the White House on
the subject Of slaughter for mere slaugh-
ter's sake
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
An Executive session

From the Springfield Republican.
The country can understand now why
the extra panic session of Congress was
given up The President saw a way
TO be a whole extra session in himself
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
Help from insurance Companies.

From the Louisville Courier Journal
The great life insurance companies are
coming TO the aid of thousands with
policy loans. These companies, despite
some mismanagement withstood the
shock of a house cleaning. American
securities will pull through somewhat
similar experience.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

From the Cleveland Plain Dealer.
No doubt good many Of these count
less bacteria that are reported 10 find
lodgment in playing cards are lost in the
shuttle.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

Ten years ago the per capita circula-
tion was $23.23, whereas It is now $S3 %.
Perhaps we never shall get things alb
solutely right until We get away from
that % entirely.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
The Difference.
York EFening Post

From the New York EFening Post.
We limit the self-government OF the
FiHpinos because they fight. that OF the
Porto Ricans because they do not. It Is
a poor rule which does not work both
ways.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
A Desirable Girl.

Does she model in clay, or anything
Ike that?'
Nix; she models in mlncemeat and
pumpkin and pie crust. and things like
them"
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
journalistic Peace

From the New York Evening Post
Whatever the future hslds il is suf-
ficient for the peace Of Europe at present
that for some time TO come the English
and German jingO journals have ceased
from troubling.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
Popuiar Place.

There's only one place on the map.
And great Is its renown.
You've lately heard some talk, mayhap.
Concerning Turkeytown.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
Matter Enonrh

From the Memphis Commercial Appeal.
What's the matter with the rail-
roads asks writer in the Atlantic.
Nothing except that they can't issue
free passes 70 newspaper men any more
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

Mobile is Moving" says a headline IN
the Montgomery Advertiser Col. John
Temple Graves idea OF side-stepplng
drought evidently is catch
iug
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
What She Said.

What did your wife say when you told
her that you had lost your money in
stocks?-
what n foolish question She said
what every other woman would say under
similar circumstances: Isn't that just
Ike a man2'"
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

The Baltimore American thinks the Sec
retary OF War viii return to US lust
plain BIZ Taft" Don't know about tba,
Congressman Theodore Burton. for In.
stance, may greet him with some such
words as Just explain, Bill TAFT"
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
The Difference

Il find can wear my last years over
coat again. chirped the opumist.
Il find I'll have TO" growled the pessi-
mist.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

Smoking is an index 10 character"
says an English physician In the here
after. smoking will mean that your char
acter on earth failed 10 come up to the
required standard.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
Same wayf

Scientists say we dig our graves with
our mouths"
How about our ship canals?"
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

Two lone senators voted against the
prohibition bill in Alabama. and. OF
course. the blue-ribboners will claim that
was two bad
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

delphia Public Ledger. There are lot of
leather-lunged people in this country who
do not appear to appreciate the fact. also.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

State Senator Finn, of Pittsburg. is
quoted as saying he would give s., 600 600
FOR United States Senatorship. OF
course. this advanced price is caused By
the increased cost of grating.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

The more Mr.. Grover Cleveland thinks
Of the forthcoming bond issue, the more
pleasure he gets out Of his fishing trips
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

The Prince Of Bourbon has Just passed
away possessed Of q children and $40
Go.OO0 The man must have been a
billionaire on his wedding day.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

An Illinois professor has opened a
class in courtsh,p- II his is a coed in
stituuon, the innovation should make a
great hit with the scholars.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

John w. Gates says he never expects
to enter Wall street again. This should
put another crimp in the financial furry
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
MEN AND THINGS.


Among the odd things and customs
seen by a returned traveller during a re-
cent trip TO Montreal and Quebec were
two-wheeled milk wagons. with guards
over the wheels Ike an automobiles the
milk cans sitting in the wagon without
cover; oil cloth covers on house steps
that ran into the streets; trolley cOnduc-
tors poking their money boxes for fare
In passengers faces as they entered the
cars; many trolley cars having entrances
or exits IN the middle, there being no
front or back entrances: everybody talk
ing French ana smoking cigarettes: one
horse landaus that would hold four per-
sons; little houses and big churches;
small-siZed, thin, women and men. lad
ders on the roofs Of all slanting-
houses for use OF fremen and chimney
sweepers; farms in the suburbs 800 feet
wide to a mile in length: policemen un-
able 10 talk any language except French:
only a single colOred man in both cities:
horses used In carriages and caleches big
enough for draying use: churches well
filed on Sunday mornings and ball
games on Sunday afternoon.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

DOUBTLESS we shall have ali the bonds
we need in our business, even though
we have TO dig the Panama canal a
mile wide TO keep up appearances.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

man who has been carrying a rub
Der tube in his lung for twenty years
mas Just found 1t out, says the Phila-
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

Senator Reed Smoot is likewise mourn.
Ing for the congratulatory epistle that
failed to arrive.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
Nnrrorx EHcnnr.

Jones has just had a narrow escape?"
''HOw?'
Went deer hunting and wasn't even
wounded"
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

The eagle on the new $40 gold piece
forgot to take off his overalls.r saws
the Baltimore Sun. Perhaps he expects
to be the one saved up for a rainy dav
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

Still, II Is by no means certain that
that Pennsylvania lad who killed three
bears in one day in his neighborhood
could kill even one in a Louisiana cane
brake
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
HFa nTnrN,
4 Sure Wnr-

The motto Of Bryan.
"Nothin' like tryin'."
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
The suItan,s JeweIr.

The Sultan Of Morocco Is taking no
chances Of losing his personal jeweIry IN
the course Of one Of the frequently re-
curing disturbances In his country.
Locked UP In the vaults Of a bank near
Charing Cross, London. the jewels. valued
at S.o0.o0o are guarded night and day.
The valuables occupy space less than
the size Of a bushel basket. and lie about
thirty feet below the level of the Strand
Not FAR away. IN the same vaust. are sew
eral million pounds worth OF 'unclaim-
ed jeweITy. some Of which was deposited
there during the French Revolution.
French people. fearful Of being robbed in
the Reign Of Terror. secretly conveyed
their possessions TO London. and a vast
quantity has been left uncalled for. The
bank authorities have failed in every ef-
fort 70 locate the orlgianl owners heirs.
An offer Of ESQ. 900 as a loan on the Sui
tan's jewelry has been made. but the Sui
tan is anxious 10 raise much more than
that 20 pay MS army and obtain enough
10 meet the ransom demanded by Raisuli
for the release Of Caid Maclean
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

Pixies Peak is found 70 be only 41G7
feet above the level of the sea, instead
of 14,147. Let us be thankful that some
thing is coming down, anyhow.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

Can it be possible that the Japanese
war scare has fallen in a coal hole some
where?
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
New Use for Photographs.

Determined that no dispute shall arise
between themselves and the special
agents OF the government when the time
comes for them TO prove up, a number
OF homesteaders in the st. Louis Valley
country have adopted the novel expert
ment Of phOtOgraphing their claims. To
show what they tell Of their homeSteads
Is true the photographs win be on hand
when the hearing on the final proof is
held The photographs are taken from
different views, and will give a clear idea
Of the amount of land which has been
cleared and placed under cultivation.
and If there is any dispute the home
steaders will be able to present strong
evidence 10 support their contentious.
The photographs being made now will
show the growing crops, and other photo
graphs viii be taken from time to time
10 show other Improvements which are
being made upon the claims. Gust
Eklund and Frank E. Anderson, two
homesteaders. have set the example in
having these photographs taken. and now
every claim holder in this vicinity has
provided himself or herself with a cam
era and is engaged In taking snapshots
showing the buildings and other improve
ments upon their claims.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

Consul F. w. Mahin. OF Nottingham,
reports that the value Of refrigerated
produce annually imported into Great
Britain is now close TO 500 900. 900. about
half OF which comes from the British
colonies. The United States and South
America each contributes some $4,000, 900
worth. Russia about 100000 worth, the
remainder being distributed among sew
eral countries. fhe greatest value IS Of
butter and cheese. about $75. 10000 Beef
Is next, nearly 10000 mutton, 10000
900; eggs. over 100000: bananas. nearly
SlO.OO0.W0 and poultry. pork. and game,
about 100000. The first import OF re-
frigerated produce 10 Great Britain was
in 1873, when some frozen mutton was
brought from Australia
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
Queer German TransIations.

The Kaiser's well-known objection 10
the use in German publications OF foreign
words has created German translations
for many strictly American words.
among which 'wolken-krutzer' c'sky-
scraperD and gummi-hals wagon
Crubberneck c0ach) are fair samples
But that English has lot been banished
may be seen by these words, taken from
three German papers received in the last
mail: Manager society swell. " cham
pion, training. meeting ''snob.
weekend. "lOafer." striker mob"
full dress, smoker and return tick
et. while bank check IS brought with
In the German lines by being written
bank scheck" "
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
vienna's Electric Road.

In ORDER 10 facilitate the collection and
delivery Of letters and packages in
Vienna. the ministry Of commerce is en-
gagged upon a plan for an underground
electric railroad which would link to-
gether the chief district post-offices Of
the city. sixty-fOur in all According to
the plans which are now under discussion.
the line would be built twenty-five feet
below the surface of the ground, and the
tunnel would have a height Of five feet
and breadth OF four feet four inches.
The stations would be built underneath
the pOst-ofhCes. The trains would run at
twenty miles an hour. and would consist
or a motor and three ears, each carrying
as much as the ordinary post van. 1t is
estimated that seven years would be re-
quired for the construction Of the line.
W hlle II would cost an enormous sum Of
money. in the long run the line could be
operated for much less than the present
horse and wagon service, while the mails
could be handled In less than half the
time now required for the purpose
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
Catering for IA squadron.

The Navy Department has undertaken
catering on a magnificent scale In the
current issue Of Harper's Charles A. Sid
man gives many interesting figures 10
show the magnitude Of the departments
contract in arranging TO feed the battle
ship squadron which sails for the PacifC
In December The size Of the task is
evident when il is noted that each Of the
sixteen battle ships IN the squadron has
complement OF about 80 officers and
900 men, and each Of the six torpedo
boats officers and 20 men. making a
grand total OF more than 1900 men to be
fed for five months. They viii REQUIRE
S,Oo00 pounds Of provisions. including
10000 pounds pf spring-wheat flour
9.v9 pounds OF oatmeal, OF, when served
10 the men, called 'burgOo:" g.. 900 pounds
Of yellow corn meal. 5000 pounds of
cocoa. 2J010 pounds OF prunes, about
$4,000 pounds Of canned peaches and 9th
er canned fruit IOOO,O 900 pounds OF fresh
beef. 10000 pounds OF mutton. $4,000
pounds OF salt pork. $1,000 pounds OF
bacon. 100000 pounds Of smoked hams.
1900 pounds Of veal, I0.000. 600 pounds of
sausages. 5000 gallons OF beans. 80 eco
pounds OF canned string beans. 5000
pounds Of sauerkraut 10000 pounds Of
onions, and 10000 pounds Of potatoes
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

People who are anxious 10 make a pile
or dust. ought 90 sift their ashes
Fine.
What's the use Of frettin',
Amt no use TO cry;
So long as I am gettin'
A slice O. pumpkin pie
Go my way smilin'
Happy TO de core;
So long as I can get II,
I'll pass my plate for more.
No Doubt of IL.
First old maid-"Do you think she's
happy?"
Second old maid-"Certainly. She's
married"
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21
LOnn System for Yale

The corporation Of Yale University has
appointed a committee Of three to con-
fer with similar body of the alumni
council on the subject OF establishing a
loan system in place OF giving sums out
right from the treasury for the aid Of
needy students. The report Of the treas
urer for 1907 showed that S77,5S3, or about
one-seventh OF the gross income OF the
university. was paid out last year in the
assistance Of needy students. OF this
amount however, a considerable percent
age came from funded legacies or gifts
left 10 the university for the express OBJ
Ject Of aiding needy students.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

Al memories q sweet summer eves
or moonlit wave and wiliowy wsy.
of stars and aovers. and dcFy leaves
And smiles and tones more dear than they.
The Washington herald., 1907-11-21

The Washington Herald is deliUered bg
carrier IN the District Of Columbia and at
Alexandria, Va, at IS cents per month,
daily and Sunday, or at 2j cents per
month toithoHt the Sunday issue.