The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1907-07-11

jon ~
.Dsd your cook lsavs you without
my warning, MrA Smithr -Yss, and
without any spoonA too"-Baltimoes
Cutner- Sivon ~ mcs-
phtne tnsosad a Quininsl DF1G1st-
q Il possibisi In that eass 20 ows
- twenty-five cants mOre-Pstit Par
lAtA
Mn Nonsg Bar-I bar you have
spant grsat dsal Of your dine IN It
'alH1 Ma Parvenus-Oh. yea my
asar; ws'rs quits Italicized Prince
bon reer.
Impsruns- cid man; Jon dont
know any one who would lsnd mo :
dollar inst now, Do youi Gotrox-
iso; al the people know. know you
boo.-Ls Figaro
Lady Ito dinner partner trying to
ikiss her In the garden)- you are
wasting your time! am married
Il don't care. I'm not q bit jealous r
i-simplicissimus.
The evidence shows MrA Aulcohey.
that you threw 4 stone at Policeman
Casey" TT shows more than that. yer
honor, It shows that OF hit him.
Minneapolis Tribune.
you point with pride to the fact that
you were never investigated" Ger
tainly," answered Senator Sorghum.
TT shows that l have not been care
less washington Star.
SweIIup latter the dinner)-Yea, !
told that pretty girl next to me every
thing l knew. RIVAL noticed you
were pretty quiet over at that end Of
the table.-DetroIt Free Press
She (after q vIvacious discussion)-
All, you dare TO look me In the face
He (philosophically) GOOD heavens
In this world one becomes accustomed
to everything IN Motto per Ridere.
Teacher-Who was 1t supported the
! world upon his shoulders7 Tommy
Atlas, sir. Teacher-Who supported
Atlas? Tommy-The book don't say,
but / 'spect his wife did-Ally Sloper.
Wlllie-Papa, If 1 am liar, win !
go to the bad place? Twickenham-
Certainly. Why? WILLIE was think
ing how far away you and l would be
from mother.-Woman' Home Com
panion.
"You are past forty. inspector; why
do you not marry?" why. you see, |
do not want to marry an old woman, a
Young girl would be fool to marry me,
and 1 do not like fools ,"-Transatlan-
tic Tales.
Boreleigh Cat II :45)-Ah, Miss Crit
Ic. YOU have such sweet, retiring dis
position. Miss Critic (yawning) You
Hatter me, Mr.. BoTeleigh; but / must
confess to a slight disposition to re-
tire.-Puck.
Said She-One has to put up with a
good deal In order TO become an &C
complished pianist. Said He-Yes, and
just think how much more the neigh
bors have to put up with--Chicago
Daily News.
Wiggles-D.d you have any difficulty
In speaking French while you were in
Paris? Waggles-Oh, no; didn't have
any difficulty at all In speaking 1t. The
difficulty was In getting people to un-
ierstand t."-Somerville Journal.
Mrs. Subbubs- John, I'm sorry
the new cook has spoilt your coffee.
but she's so young and inexperienced.
So you must be satisfied with a kiss
Instead this evening, dear. John
Right OH call her in--Pick-Me-Up.
81 can't understand how Caesar and
Shakespeare and Napoleon ever got to
be great" Have you read the his
tories of their timesT Yes That's
what makes 1t so puzzling. Nobody
seemed to teach anything by mall In
those days"-Chicago Record-Herald-
Aren't you nearly ready to startT
asked the amateur gunner. Yes" re-
piled the guide, 'I'll be ready Just as
soon as | can borrow a dog" why,
where's your own dogs7 What has
happened to them?" Nothing, and l
mean to see that nothing shall."-Phll-
adelphia Press.
aDis paper" said Languid Lewis,
tells erbout boss runnin' away with
woman, an she was laid up for six
weeks" Dat amt so worse" rejoin-
ed Boastful Benjamin. "a friend Nv
mine wunst ran away with boss, an
be was laid up fer six years"-Chica-