Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1907-01-13
Rough on Gus.

Yvette Guilbert, the French actress. now
speaks English well enough to joke in it.
At a tea given in her honor by Phila-
delphia women's club, she said:
English is not difficult But one word
may have so many different meanings.
That is sometimes vexing.
"A mother said to her daughter:
Don't you find Gus rather rough"
The daughter answered, with faint
blush:
Yes, mamma; and yet he says he shaves
every day"
A Swinish Error.
In my scrapbooks," said, Clyde Fitch,
the playwright. Il have many examples OF
typographical errors.
"Of all these errors l like best the one
wherein a tea given by society woman In
81 was called "a swill affair
Lamed the Ghost.
Sir William Henry Perkin, the inventor
of many coal tar dyes. was talking in New
York, before he sailed for England, about
the Psychical Research Society.
Some other scientists go in for psychical
research" he said though l confess that
to me the subject makes no great appeal.
Personally 1 have come in contact, dur
ing a fairly long career. with but one ghost
story Its hero was man whom I'll call
Shocks.
He was visiting at country house, and
was put in the haunted chamber for the
night. He said he felt no uneasiness.
Nevertheless, he took to bed with him a
revolver of the latest American pattern.
f'He fell asleep without difficulty, but as
the clock was striking he awoke with
strange feeling of oppression.
Lifting his head, he peered about HIM
The room was wanly illumined by the full
Moon and in that weird. blush light he
saw a small hand claSping the ran at the
foot of the bed.
who's there?' he said TREMENDOUSLY.
There was no reply. The hand did not
move.
Again there was no reply. and Shocks
sat up cautiously, took careful aim and
fired.
HE limped from that night on, for he
shot off two of his own toes"
What Might Have Been.
Mrs. Hollingsworth Andrews of Philadel-
| pbia is one of the best whist players in
| America At the end of a discussion on
gambling she said the other day:
| Never play for a stake if you have chill
dren, and never say to your partner In any
| case at the end of a game. If you had done
| this or that the outcome would have been
different Whenever 1 have partner of
| the If you had kind 1 think of the great
Cavendish
done so-and-so, we'd have made so-and-
| So he always replied:
| Did you ever hear the story of your
| uncle and your aunt?
| IF the player had heard it he would at
| once become silent, not wishing to hear II
again If he had not heard it he would
| nause in his post-mortem of the game and
say; MN :.
| Then Cavendish would frown and say
| in solemn voice:
If your aunt ha.. been a man she would
| have been your uncle. y
| A Patriot.
.aThe late General Shafter" said a sol
der had a contempt for military posers'
They who fiourished stumpS and limps Ike
| medals got no sympathy from him.
! "In San Francisco I once heard him rdi-
| Guile these military posers. He said there
! was a general of volunteers who got his leg
| scratched by caisson wheel in a retreat,
and forever after nursed and glorifed the
trif1ing wound, growing lamer and lamer as
| the years passed, in order that his bravery
| might never be forgotten.
| "One day young man from the west,
| calling on the generals daughter, met the
| old warrior.
man.
"'Yes,' said the general, pompously; I
am lame
"Slip on the ice?'
| mo, sir said the general, with frown.
"'Not an automobile mix-up, l hopper
"'No, sir; it was not an automobile mix
| up The general spoke ferociously.
| Sleigh overturn. sir?
| 1.-The general rose. He set his lame leg
tenderly on the floor. He hobbled to the
door. browning back savagely from the
threshold he shouted:
"'Go read the history of your country,
you young puppy"
A Concert Toilet.
Heinrich Conried was talking about old
| fashioned concerts.
Some Of the hits directed at these con-
certs were merited," he said.
zone was made by an old Chicago mil
lionaire. He called upstairs to his daugh-
terS:
| "'What a time you girls take getting
ready for the concert! Look at me- bit OF
| waddng in each ear, and I'm all ready"
Censored.
when Maxim Gorky lunched with me. -
1