davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1907-06-26

A few doses of this remedy will in
variably cure an ordinary attack of
diurrhea.
1t can always be depended upon.
even in the more severe attacks of
cramp collie and cholera morbus.
Its equally successful for summer
diarrhGa aud cholera infantum in
children, and Is the II cans of saving
the lives of many children each year
When reduced with water and
sweetened il is pleasant to take.
Every man of Il family should keep
this remedy in his home. BUY now.
PRICE, 25C. LARGE SIZE, soc.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1907-06-26
Rutte- ard Er1 MEL.

1t is duh market day in New York
city when 100000 eggs and 100000
pounds OF butter are not received.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1907-06-26
Relic of Queen Victoria.

A treasured relic at Penhurst place.
in Kent, is a stool, covered with faded
blue velvet and edged with silver cord
Queen Victoria knelt upon it to re.
ceive the sacrament at her coronation
hence its great interest as a relic.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1907-06-26

It's good old world after all;
Ii you have no friends or money,
In the river you Gan fall;
Marriages are quite common and,
More people there would be,
Provided you take Rocky Noun
tain Tea.
A q Van (Iilder
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1907-06-26
Doesn't Live ln a Flat.

What is meant by the expression,
the worm will turn?"
Possibly that the worm doesn't
live in a fat. Philadelphia Press.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1907-06-26
BALAD1N

THE only imported Percheron
horse in Mason or Jackson
counties.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1907-06-26
Best Day Of AII.

The day that succeeds the downfall
of tyrant is always the best.-Cur.
thus Montanus.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1907-06-26
FILSON BROS
HARDWARE
Always U-To-Date.
Everything in the Hardware Line.
4'al[Zkll!ZI lilIDt
Good Roofing, Cornice
and Ornamental Work
Point Pleasant. w. Va.

"My child was burned terribly
about the face, neck and oheet 1
applied DR. Thomas Eclectrio OIL
The pain ceased and the child
sank into restful sleep" -Mrs
Nancy M 81 neon, Hamburg. N
W
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1907-06-26

oIXPehce IN bunocks Stomach.
a sixpence of the reign of Charles
/. was found in the stomach of a bull.
lock killed recently by a Yarmouth
(England) butcher.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1907-06-26
kOdOl
For Dyspepsia

dlgests what you eat, takes the strain of
OF the hear, and contributes nourishrnent
strength and health TO every organ Of the
body. For Indigestion. Dyspepsia, Sour
Stomach, Inflammation Of the mucous
membranes lining the Stomach and Dipes-
I've Tract Nervous Dyspepsia and catarrh
Of the Stomach.
liter eating. nyfood would dlstres, me bv n,,L,,,
my heart palpitste and I Would become yery Vests
finally get bottle Of Kodol and II gave me inne-
nlate relief Aiter using q few bottles an cured
MRS. LoRIEd NICHOLS, Penn Yan. NY.
bad stomach trouble and was in q bad stale as I
bad hear trouble with II. took Kodol DyIpepSis
Cure Tor about four months and It cured me.
D. KAUELR Nevada. o.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30
THE HUMOROUS SIDE

Deacon slicker-I think ,tyd the sns garson yst i
not sufficiently proge s5diisoharge him.
hd5e Beacon ys,T not Sr6S 5sde Sead his
salary? Then he'd probably orop oeau'--
Puck.
.,s ,erd YOU money how do I know
,bat shall ever see it again?
'st rs the word Of an honest man worth
arysnltaai r'!ygsenrltaaainly-bYing him alons"-Fiiesen-
de Blatter.
"I never saw man a. With tbs t5rsf suSh t,1 nead
Ior s.s,,,art Is her asked the other,
..Shi 7 mean for our business; he's ap-
so,vfaiv bald. Philadelphia Press.
"Do YOU think cabbage is unwhole-
so,ne D., asked the dyspeptic.
so.ft aIt depends somewhat" answered the
tpou tTv 10 smoke Washington Star.
"He looks terribly sad"
Yes; S1e his his engagement with Miss Perty
has come to an end.
no: SIoteI married a m."-Houston Post.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30
SCIENCE OF THE DIVINE
PASSION

Why men and women love, as seri-
Gus problem, tested the skill and phil
osophy of mankind since Adam wooed
Eve in the garden of Eden.
1t win likely be as much of prob
lem when the last scroll is writ and
the earth has outlived it's usefulness.
And then the wise man will be no
nearer the solution of the problem than
he is today.
This aphorism, however does not pre-
vent many a scientist from presuming
that love is a fit subject for dissection,
analysis and classification Each fresh
venturer into this field starts most
enthusiastically, progresses rapidly at
first, then more slowly, and finally
comes to a cold, dead halt, convinced
that he has been travelling only in a
circle and that the end is but the be-
ginning, after all.
The latest professor to put his head
into this moose is DR.. G. Stanley Hall,
president of a university in Worcester.
Mass DR.. Hall has written books upon
the psychology of love, also its physi-
ology, and has given years of hard
study to it. He really believes that he
has arrived at some definite conclu-
sions, and resume of them is printed
in another column of The Herald to-
day. But has he settled the great prob
lem? Undoubtedly no.
For one thing, DR.. Hall asseverates
that so per cent of the college educated
ports do not prove that they do not
wed; quite the contrary. However
much they may "scorn" it in the alb
stract-and that is habit of many
girls who never saw a college-they
nevertheless are quick to enter its holy
bonds when the right man pleads for
their hand and heart. College with its
ologies and it's isms may not be a good
school for the blind god, but it doesn't
seem to eradicate the idea that Cupid,
after all, is pretty wise little chap,
and knows his business. in or out of
school.
Then the learned doctor goes on to
analyze, on the basis of college boys
poems, the stronger attractive features
about the oppoc4o sex which lead to
love Because more verses are indited
to eyes and hair, he forsooth insists
that hair and eyes are the greatest
snares which woman possesses. But
he doesn't differentiate between the
varieties Of either. He fails to infer
whether carrotty red locks are as strong
magnet as shimmering gold, or II
watery blue eyes will pull with the
same power as soulful brown. Hence,
what do the conclusions prove? And
he utterly overlooks the fact that few
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30
BEATS THE BUNCH

The esteemed western sisters of Los
Angeles make a poor comparative
showing as they appear in the financial
swim. The end of the fiscal half year,
now at hand, brings to light an inter-
esting exhibit of figures. Certain cities
that hold their heads proudly in the
Los Angeles "set'' are found to be rel
ative weaklings in their financial un-
derpinning.
Los Angeles is out of sight of the
whole coterie of competitors in it's finan-
cial standing as shown by the several
bank statements. The aggregate cap
ital of the city's banks is $13, ,945, 900.
Among the cities that pretend to be in
the same class Denver comes next to
Los Angeles in bank capital, with a
total of $4,O75, ,OOO-less than one-third
of the figure for this city. Following
in financial order are Seattle, 1903, 900;
Portland, $2,655, 900; Sacramento. $685.
500; Salt Lake, $2,55O,OOO; Oakland,
So, 500, 100
The bank capital of Los Angeles ex-
ceeds the combined bank capital of the
five cities named above-$1894 945,0O0 for
Los Angeles, $13,S94,OOO for all the rest.
The bank deposits of this city at the
present time foot UP the splendid total
of $113OOO,OOO OF that sum 100000
is "velvet" peoples surplus, Sc
curely tucked away in the savings
banks. The accrued interest on the
bank deposits of the city for the half
year now closing foots up the snug
sum of 100000.
No wonder that Los Angeles is out
of sight in the lead of the western
urban procession.
| And-"watch us grow.'
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

words in the English language afforC
easier or more plentiful rtymes-a nee
essary fact to be considered in versify
ing-than do these two. Such partia
conclusions, therefore, are decidedly un
reliable and misleading.
Again, the doctor argues that lisp Is
| potent repellant force. Now, thi:
doesn't hold good. Lisping, if prettllJ
done, Is one of the most attractive
things about a lovely maid, and is sure
to set her apart from the great mass
of her correctly enunciating sisterhood
Lisping, 1t seems, therefore, should be
included in the list of strongest attrac-
tivities. On the other hand, what is
more disgusting in fair girl than the
chewing gum habit? And this is a
thing that Dr. Hall admits draws men
unto her!
Undoubtedly the good doctor is earn
est in his efforts to analyze and classify
the various attributes of the divine
passion; he has spent years at the
work, But he is travelling in circle,
all the same. 1t proves nothing that
half the world finds a single charm a
potent one; the other half may think
it only a mark of repellance. The fact
is that love is as fleeting, as transitory
and as elusive as the first faint flush of
dawn; it comes unbidden more often
own, unerringly out of a world of 9TH
ers, and it knows it's own under any
circumstances, no matter how improba-
BILE or unpropitious. 1t is no more to
be analyzed than is the evanescent
charm of the summer zephyr, and no
more to be corralled and classified than
is the music of the spheres. 1t is. in
fact, a bit of the divine; an emana-
ton of the infinite; a Whit of the
glories of the future world of bliss,
given man that he may find herein ii
basis for his dreams of the coming
elysium; it defies analysis as does the
knowledge inherent in man that there
is God; it exists, but none may define,
limit or segregate it.
All one has to do to enjoy it is to
accept it: no man can create it or de-
stroy it; none can make or unmake it.
1t is a fact-alone, incomprehensible,
immense.
Happy he who has caught a glimpse
of it; doubly blessed he who has grasped
the torch and has kindled it's blaze at
his own fireside. He knows what love
is; and all the dryasdust philosophy
or psychology in the world conveys to
him not one iota of meaning or care
or knowledge. He has the divine af-
fatus; for more he gives not a hang!
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30
WITH THE POETS
BALLAD OF OUR COOKS

Selena's speciality was brooms
And scrubbing and adjusting.
Daily she cycloned through the rooms
Industriously busting.
With her the ice box door staid shut
And milk staid sweet-sic semper;
We really loved Selena, but
We couldn't stand her temper.
Carlotta's voice was soft and low
A most pacific creature;
A pious gooUness seemed to show
Upon her every feature.
And clever, too, we never had
To shout to make her see things;
It's cruel to be obliged to add
She stole our silver tea things.
Jemima-bless her!-loudly scorned
The least preVarications;
Her lightest moments were adorned
With Biblical quotations.
We liked Jemima-Ill be bound
l sometimes think we would have
Kept her forever. But we found
She crank more than she should have
Katrina flirted all day long;
Sabina fed her cousins;
Elizabeth was never strong
(But dances!-by the doZens).
Now Mary rules authoritat-
lively our culinary;
And we've patiently await
A fresh surprise from Mary.
Puck.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30
Cardinal Gibbons on Divorce Laws
From thc DeIineator FOR JuIy.

atOr for July.
the jealousy or hatred of the other.
And these melancholy scenes are fol-
lowed by the final act of the drama
when the family ties are dissolved and
hearts that had vowed eternal love and
union are separated to meet no more.
The facility with which marriage Is
annulled is most injurious to the morals
of individuals, of the family and OF
society.
1t leads to ill-assorted and hasty mar
riages, because persons are less c1rcum-
spect in making compact which may
afterward be dissolved almost at will.
1t stimulates discontented and un-
princlpled husband or wife to lawless-
ness, quarrels and even adultery we'll
knowing that the very crime will afford
pretext and legal grounds for separa-
tion.
1t engenders between husband and
wife fierce litigations about the custody
of their offspring.
It deprives the children of the pro-
tecting arm of a ether or the gentle
care of a mother and too frequently
consigns them to the cold charity of the
world; for the married couple who are
wanting in conjugal love for one an
other are too often destitute also Of
parental affection. In word, it brings
into the household blight and desc
lation which neither wealth nor luxury
can repair.
This social plague calls for a radical
cure, and the remedy can be found
/ only in the abolition of our mischievous
legislation regarding divorce and in an
honest application of the teachings OF
the gospel.
If persons contemplating marriage
were persuaded that once united they
were legally debarred from entering
into second wedlock, they would be
more circumspect before marriage in
the choice of life partner, and would
be. more patient afterward in bearing
the yoke and in tolerating each others
J infirmities.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30


THE reckless facility with which di-
vorce is procured in this country is
an evil scarcely less deplorable than
Mormonism-.ndeed. it is in some re-
spects more dangerous than the latter,
for divorce has the sanction of the civil
law, which Mormonism has not Is not
the law of divorce a virtual liberation
of Mormonism in a modified form?
Mormonism consists in a simultaneous
polygamy, while the law of divorce
practically leads to successive polyg-
amy.
Each state has on it's statute books a
list of causes-or, rather, pretexts-
which are recognized as sufficient
ground for divorce There are in all
twenty-five or more causes, most of
them of a trifling character, and in some
states, as in Illinois and Maine, the
power of granting a divorce Is LETT TO
the discretion of the judge.
1t Is plainly manifest that the cancer
OF divorce is rapidly spreading oversthe
community and poisoning the fountains
o. the nation. Unless the evil is checked
by some speedy and heroic remedy, the
existence of family life Is imperiled.
How can we call ourselves Christian
people If we violate fundamental law
of Christianity? And If the sanctity
and indissolubility of marriage does not
constitute cardinal principle of the
Christian religion. am at a loss to
know what does.
Picture to yourself the fearful wrecks
daily caused by this rock of scandal,
and the number of families that are
csst adrift on the ocean of life.
Great stress is justly laid by moral
lists on the observance of the Sunday.
But what a mockery is the external
repose of the Christian Sabbath to
homes from which domestic peace is
banished where the mothers heart Is
broken and the fathers spirit crushed,
and where the children cannot cling to
one of their parents without exciting
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30
GROWING AT RAPID RATE

/
Building permits for the month OF
June in Los Angeles exceed 81, 500, 900 ir
value, including $50 new homes.
That is some indication of the con.
tinued marvellous growth of this beauti.
full and unrivaled city.
But these figures have reference only
to actual results. They do not include
the vast plans for improvements and
enterprises which are in process of ar
rangement in every direction. They
tell the good story of accomplishment,
which is source of pride and pleasure,
but they are the proverbial drop in
the bucket" compared with the known
developments in every line of construc-
tion.
Since the voting of the $23,000,000 of
bonds for the great Owens river aque-
duct, public confidence in the future of
Los Angeles has. been augmented for
they constitute the assurance that there
need be no limit hereafter to the growth
of this city or to Southern California.
Under a wise, careful and economical
administration of municipal affairs. en-
terprises of every character are begin
ming to be planned and rapidly consum-
mated. Real estate deals have re-
sumed their forward movement. Sky
scrapers and cottages are now going up
at rate which makes it difficult to
keep pace with them. Street railway
extension is again pushing out into sub
urban sections and through the heart
of the city. The great subway system
to the sea is nearly ready for the actual
work of construction and splendid in
dustries are in process of formation and
building.
The uneasy feeling in the eastern
money markets has already disappeared,
and the financial condition of Los An
years. Several months ago certain east
ern railroad wizards of finance" made
an effort to impede public sentiment
against them by threatening hard
times and predicting a close money
market: and for awhile, it must be con-
fessed, they had the bankers and peo-
pie guessing. But they cried ''wolf"
too soon. There is no wolf, and it did
not take long to discover that there
does not exist, present or prospectively,
a single one of the conditions necessary
to create hard times. In spite of all
the grain gambling in eastern cities,
the crops of the country are up to the
average and the green bug" disap- |
peared as suddenly as it had come. |
Business everywhere is enormous and
is being conducted generally upon safe
and prudent lines. Factories are work.
ing overtime and instead of overpro-
duction the demand is still ahead of
the supply in every department of
trade. Railroads are so busy they are
unable to accommodate the demand
for cars, and from every city and town
comes the sound of increasing manu-
facture
In politics there is not and will not
be any cause for apprehension Both
the leading parties are showing no in
clination to disturb the general pros
perity, and it is felt that even the presi-
dental year will have little or no eff
feet upon the commerce of the coun-
try.
AS for Los Angeles and its delightful
environs, there is every reason 20 fore
see the greatest year in its history All
we need to do is to continue the old
habit of pulling together and working
toward the achievement
of marvellous results.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30
sPRINe-lN THE PUBLIC PRESS

The hedges shoot, the linnets sing,
The lambkin cuts his capers;
And yet-a surer sign of spring
They're writing to the papers:
'I heard the cuckoo yesterday"
II saw a Painted Lady"
Il found an orchis blooming gay
Within a coppice shady"
THE lilac trees are all in bud
Down here in Sleepy Hollow"
I've reused a tadpole from the mud, >
I've seen the primal swallow"
And so on, But the while 1 doubt
If such they've really seen, sir,
And read the reams they ladle out
With rather skeptic mein, sir.
I'm glad to meet them, I confess,
And always feel elated
When cuckoos cuckoo-in the Press,
A fortnight antedated.
And swallows are-on paper-seen
Some weeks before they're due, sir,
Because springs journalistic green"
Forecasts springs verdure true, sir.
Truth
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

Everybody hopes that Police Commits
sioner Schenck is not guilty of the
charge of having addressed an imperti-
nent remark to a passing lady. But if
he should prove to be guilty, it will
be the general demand that he be
fired" from the police board. Nobody
knows better than Police Commissioners
Schenck that one of the disgraces OF
Los Angeles is the habit which some
alleged men indulge in of standing upon
street corners and making insulting re-
marks to and about passing women and
girls. The habit must be stopped, nc
matter who may be hurt in the pro-
cess.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30
FIsHY-WIsHY FANcIEs

Sometimes, when I am weary,
| have the curious wish
That l were but tadpole,
Or just a Jelly fish.
For if / were tadpole
I'd have no social fads;
I'd spend my time "ip swimmin'" "
With other little tads.
And If 1 were a jelly fish,
Then all day long I'd eat
My mothers apple jellies,
Or other jells as sweet.
But. ah! l can't play tadpole.
For l am twenty-nine-
And hopping like a bullfrog
To keep myself in line.
And how can / Indulgence
This jelly fish whim?
I'm Topping like a founder
To keep me ''in the swim
-Robertus Love in Judge.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30
THE GRADUATES

Once more a world all tired and worn
with buffeting of fates
Is called upon to rise and greet
The sweet young graduates.
They mean to elevate the world
And raise it's sordid bent,
But all too soon will they find out
They cannot raise the rent.
Undaunted by experience
For great reforms they ache;
They burn with fine religious zeal
And also burn the steak.
So hail them as they proudly stand
In learned row on row.
They know each blessed thing on eartl
Except how much they know.
New York Sun.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

The queen of Siam is coming here in
cognito. 1t was generally supposed that
she would come in trousers, which is
her native garb. This will cause keen
disappointment, it is feared.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

All the facts in the case of Police
Commissioner Schenck should be made
known at once. And if they prove his
guilt. Mayor Harper should at once re-
move him from office.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

There is to be no change in the
Panama canal staff. No; army officers
are digging the ditch now. And they
are really digging it, not merely play
ing for fat jobs elsewhere.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

Mark Twain wore robins egg blue
bath robe through a London street, and
they thought it was funny Still, it
would be funny, right here in Los An
geleS,
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

VIII the confessed felon mayor of San
Francisco, or the convicted felon mayor,
make the Fourth of July Grafton about
freedom and liberty and honesty, up
there this week?
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

The real joke about Mark Twain's
visit to London is to see the Britishers
grin when he gets off a purely Amer
ican witticism, of whose meaning they
have no comprehension.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

Taxing, the franchises will help Los
Angeles out of financial hole, and is a
good move. 1t should have been done
long ago.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

A police commissioner should be a
model of good behavior. When he
proves not to be, his office should be
declared vacant in short order.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

IF any town lacks a man to give it a
real bangup, blowout Fourth this year
it might negotiate for Harry Orchard.
He is well up in handling high ex-
plosiyes.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

That eastern magazine which adver-
tises for good, truthful fish stories" is
commended to the choice collection
printed on The -Heralds dramatic page
today
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

No. Hartman is not going to retire.
There are several millions of dollars
that he hasn't corralled yet, lying
around loose.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

Why not let the Los Angeles-Paciflc
company put down the third rail and
settle the legal status of it by a suit
afterward?
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

That Nebraska boy who eloped with
his stepmother gives hope that there
will yet be found fool big enough to
wed his mother-in-law.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

The rumor that Mayor Schmitz will
preside at San Francisco's Fourth of
July ceremonies is denied-unless they
are held in Jail.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

Just as we'll get the ambulance corps
in practice, and have the hospital sur
geons at their posts. The glorious day
draws near.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

SOME QUESTIONS
wonder why the water works.
And what "said Pasha" said;
And also where the onion sets,
And why are pencils lead?
Please tell me are the old sea doss
What cause thesoce barksF
Also. high flyers, do they have
The liveliest skylarks!
When dog catchers the ours take up
What do the puppies pound?
Ia there much gold in Salem, Ore!
Say, how does Puget soundg
Pray tip me what the poppy seed'
What does the alley way?
oh, yes, 1 know you'll answer 'nese'
IN have some more next day.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

About now, hear poverty howls from
the big corporations with taxable
franchises. Assessor Mallard is getting
busy.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

Taxing franchises is sport for As
SCISSOR Mallard. but collecting the taxes
will be no joke.
Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-30

Why let the good roads movemen
die Just to please the Southern Pa
cifc?