New-York tribune., 1907-08-18
a Magnificent Vfndtcaffor1.
True Liberty Not Yet Dead in This Country.

The greatest events frequently occur without
sttracting much attention from those nearest 10
,be scene of their happening. It is alleged that
IN. Declaration of Independence was drawn up
esd signed without disturbing card party in
house directly hack Of the convention hall. And
historians assert with some show Of documents
fhst an automobile full Of sightseers once went
past The New York Stock Exchange without
even slowing down. History has repeated this
lesson in the strange neglect accorded to the
mementous decision OF a metropolitan judge
handed down the other day. Although the
ruling settles for all time the vexed question Of
civic rights. few persons have given il more
than casual notice. True Liberty has been vim
dicated. established and defined in no uncertain
words by the courts. and yet the masses stand
around watching the baseball scores on the bui-
ictns instead Of holding a jubilation meeting,
So hardened are we TO privileges that the
greatest boons no longer stir US even 10 thank
fulness.
True Liberty came up for trial the other day
before city magistrate This Liberty happened
10 be Polish, calling himself something less
euphonious than Szxcvsky He was defendant,
his wife the complainant His better half (this
IS surely rsky) besOught the judge TO prevent
her husband from doing the following things:
Dressing himself up in khaki suit, donning
huge silver medal por1raying Saint KasimiT the
pious Polish king: loading his three trunks and
atelothes basket onto handcart he had made,
pushing this loaded cart along the highways be
tween here and the Mississippi, and regaling the
solitary farmers on the lonely Ohio plains and
elsewhere with sweet, soft music from either,
guitar and mandolin. The fair complainant
averred her husband a fool. and she de-
clared the court should issue d permanent in
junction restraining her spouse from making
Of himself But the court couldn't find the
heart nor The precedent TO grant this wish. The
magistrate refused The petition with the asser-
lion that no court in the land has the right
prevent any citizen from making fool OF him
sc Cd lJifdm And so the handcart pushing
either twanging Polish Liberty is now on his
way 10 melt the hearts Of Western rustics.
This magnificent vindicatiOn Of True Liberty
should not be left unsung by the poets of our
land The judges decision sweeps away at one
blow the barriers insidiousy being erected by a
Clique of cranks who think everybody ought to
he compelled TO act Just so" Gradually. al
most without being perceived by needless men,
feformers have been enacting laws against per-
sons who would fain drink quart Of whiskey
al a sitting. feed the baby firecrackers paint
the cat with white lead. scatter burrs in grand
mas bed. tie dead snakes in sisters shirtwast
feed Fido sponges. unscrew the floor Of the
apartment house elevator. set off an alarm clock
al > IN the morning. waste TWO months learning
the initiation ceremonies Of the Idiotic Order Of
its and 50 Things have come To such pass
that thousands of unhappy descendants of the
genial orang-oGtang have found themselves
fhs Charybdis of total inactivity: restrictive
have laws become that these poor people must
either be reasonable or else consign themselves
70 the undertaken. Why, even gambling has
been meTciiessly attacked in these latter days
and bridge whist cannot be played with that
utter disregard Of the laws 0f health and wealth
with which II could once have been Even the
newspapers oppose the practice Of losing your
sIfes and chiadren's money imaginary horses
whose names are posted in the fake poolrooms
a9Vntown and in Harlem And now there are
Signs Of a similar hostility toward the idea OF
paying LS-cent fares through the new tunnel
frola Queens 10 Manhattan And YOU all know
the wild outcries being raised against rebating
eno Determinations in restraint Of trade; they
are al manifestations Of that dreadful tendency
10 compel everybody TO be as sensible as a few
G1ltured potentates think they ought 10 be.
Were il not for the great decision we have
Mentioned, whittier might not the country drift
IN time2 The very syrup and faVoring matter
Of human existence would long be squeezed
OCT Of everyday life. The highest pleasure
known 10 man. namely. the thought that ne IS