The semi-weekly messenger. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1897-1908, 1907-06-28

lead.
SATURDAY.
Yesterdays bout. II such IL may be
called. put Teddy on his mettie. Con-
found the luck. He had lis boxing
gloves on AT breakfast today. and in
sisted that | eat seven helvings ~
breakfast food, because he mean TO
have a go" with me a~ftervRTd.
objected. A go" with the President
menas that he comes and 90.
Put OH the gloves. Loeb, he laid.
oh. no." said |. colby.
Put on the gloves
All. go way"
But this time TEDDY was dancing -
round me. tie made n te.0t as q TO
tie my shoestrings. but tapped ne In
stead on the forehead. For a moment
| thought my eyesight was ruined.
| Quickly DOMINIC the gloves, | threw
| myself into a posture Of de.ens" BE-
| hind a pillar.
He came at me like a monsoon. |
| actually paired fou- terrible blows.
and was getting nearer n nearer to
his face when I was stopped by usua:
shower of metcors. and woke up In nc
next room.
Another round?" qusri,d TcIdN
No. answered firmly. Il object To
sleeping in the daytime"
He looked very angry.
One knockout does not maxi 4
secretary he remarked.
But he couldn't get me into tho *
eCutire ring again.
MONDAY.
Teehee. Applicants one. va an
three are standing NJ the front cate,
talking earnestly ami eXcitedly 10 4
strange young man. | feel in my bones
that he is applicant No. (. Teddy LAS
spied the group. and has gone out 10
see what is doing.
The group has spied Teddy and -
vanishing along the line az least re-
sistance. Teddy is furious. He has
spied me at my desk and is Fastening
toward me. | will not have a go
with him.
I'm a liar. | was doing splcndidly
when suddenly one Of my gloves m'S-
ed its signals and | hit a comet tail. |
am il bed. My wrist is perfectly non
conducting. One OF my eyes is on FUR
Tough. My face is SO swollen that |
cant scowl without biting myself.
Why ii is that | never land or the
President? Hang ii all, whenever | dive
into what looks like an opening IL
turns to be the Milky Way.
TUESDAY.
The President has inserted this al
in the papers:
WANTED-BAD, A SECRETARY
Must be a~mbidextrious without a
nervous system, athletic, agrees
i've, fond Of exposure and privations.
able 10 take dictation while asleep
and typewrite accurately in a SUBJ
marine destroyer. S~uperhuulan
strength and good Workmanship
will be accepted in lieu Of references.
Something amphibious preferred.
And for heavens sake stay six o:
eight rounds. Address r. r., TIE
White House. Washington, ID. G..
WEDNESDAY
Hawhaw! No applicants. Say, non
estly, Teddy'il never get a secretary
like me. I'm naturally modest and a
poor performer on my trumpet. bu'
I'm d looloo. Even Teddy admits Tia
every other day. BY the by, he wisJ
to get me to stay this morning.
Loeb" he said, Il will reform.
, As he spoke he began whiting the
Big Stick into a curtain pole. But
was adamant.
Loeb" he said, 81 entreat you"
AS he spoke lie fed n boxing glove
TO the grizzly.
Fut was anthracite.
THURSDAY.
NJ applicants.
FRIDAY.
No applicants
SATURDAY
! Tc.hce!
= MONDAY.
Teddy has revised the rules OF see
retarying. doing away with uhfi"ces
eary r0uGhncss in private correspon
dence ard biting In tho cltnche
> around the typewriter. But still tn
applicants don't come.
THURSDAY-FRIDAY
Hawhav'
. SATURDAY.
: TO-DAY | made preparations TO l"av
! fnr ny new job by burning boxinI
gloves. breaking training. etc. Tcdd
buttonhG!cG me ~ ! started towar'
z the white house door.
Stay" ne implored ne
was old.
-" He handed me half his -alary.
Z ! was colder.
He preserved his Nobel prize none.
into my hand.
was Fairbanks.
He tucked his private forum" ava