davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1907-08-23
Try to Do This.

Take a light chair and place it with
its back to the wall. Stand in front Of
It, facing the wall, with the toes about
foot from the front feet Of the chair,
and, placing one hand on each side Of
the chair, lean forward until the top of
your head touches the wall. The prob
lem is to lift the chair from the floor
and, without moving the feet, to take
the head away from the wall and
stand upright Simple as this appears,
1t is impossible. Very few people, as
you will find, would anticipate any diff
ficulty in doing this. Get them to try.
This trick is. of course. very like the
old one of standing against a wall
sidewise With the shoulder and one
foot touching the wall. 1t is then i'm.
possible to raise the outside foot with
out losing ones balance and falling
away from the wall.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1907-08-23
A PAPER OF PINS.

Pins were introduced in the six
teenth century.
Then they were costly and highly
priced as gifts.
A paper Of pins was more acceptable
than a bouquet.
An act was passed in 1913 making it
illegal to charge more than eightpence
a thousand for metal pins.
Persons of quality often used pins
made Of lockwood, bone and silver,
while the poor put up with wooden
skewers.
In those day husbands were often
surprised at the great amount Of mon.
ey that went for pins; hence the term
pin money"
Not SO many years ago the frugal
American housewife was wont to teach
pin economy by teaching her children
that canny couplet "See pin and
pick it up. all the day you'll have good
luck."-Philadelphia Record.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1907-08-23
WHAT TRAIN DO You TAKE7
Ia Wiring Give lie Numbsr, Name Of
Road and Time Of Arrival.

IN Wiring Give lie Number, Name Of
Road and Time Of Arrival.
When you telegraph a friend the
next time you are going to visit him,
and that you'd be delighted to have
him meet you ut the train the next day,
for heavens sake telegraph him intelli-
gently.
If the money, irritations and disap
pointments of the year were aggre-
gated for the United States in hope
lessly unhtelligible kilograms of this
kind, the average political economist
would have fit. When the average
person in the small city or town de.
cides on the jump to go to see a friend
in the city and decides to telegraph
that friend what train to meet, he he.
comes an unconscious imbecile.
VIII leave for Chicago tonight on s:m
train. Meet me.
This is the text of a ten word mes
sage which received the other night
from friend in an Ohio city. He had
started for Chicago before the tele-
gram was received by me, and while
wanted immensely to meet him at the
station instead of making the least eff
fort to do so took it out in swearing.
In sending telegram announcing an
arrival the name of the road and the
train number are the two absolute es-
sentials. 1t will he help to the recip-
lent of the message in most cases if
the time of the arrival of the train be
given also. Frequently. as between the
two stations involved III such mes
sage, difference of one hour in stand
ard time otherwise might confuse. But
as between the number of the train
and the numerals in the hour of ar
rival the telegrapher has chance Of
error, and in writing the message
these two sets of numerals should be
separated by the name Of the road.
Taking the ten word message as the
standard Of length. then, any person
going anywhere from any station on
any railroad may use the one set form
Of telegraphic announcement of ar
rival:
Arrive No. 8, Lake Shore, due O'Clock
Monday morning.
Ordinarily no possible further infor-
nation is necessary in the greatest
railway center in America. The train
number is Interchangeable on its own
system. Any railway employee any
where will identify the train in mo-
ment. If the recipient Of the telegram
wishes to know whether the train Is
on time before he starts to the station,
he can learn in a moment over the tel
ephone by asking about No. 5, and in
the query he will have the reader re-
spouse for the reason that his inform
ant will be grateful for the inquirer's
succinct knowledge of train operations.
H. w. Field in Chicago Tribune.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1907-08-23
Russian Ritual.

The christening of Russian prince
is a ceremony Of most ritualistic ma
ture. The infant Is first of all undress-
ed and immersed three times In the
font. The hair is then cut in the form
of a cross, and the shorn locks, having
been rolled in wax, are next dropped
into the water. According as the ball
sinks or floats in the font, so. says
Russian superstition. does good or evil
attend the child through life. The
next incident in this elaborate ritual is
the robing Of the child in gorgeous
garments, after which 1t Is carried
three times round the church, the god
fathers Of the imperial infant walking
by its side in stately procession.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1907-08-23
Bulletin 1889. DRAINAGE

Bulletin ls9, report on the drainage of
the eastern part of Cass, Trail, Grand
Forks, Walsh and Pembina counties,
North Dakota. By John T. Stewart.
The surveys report were made for the
purpose of determining the location and
sizes of drains necessary for the drain
age of the Red river of the North in
North Dakota, and the cost of their
construction. The report contains MAPS
of the counties named, showing eleva-
tions, and the location of drains Appli-
cation for this report should be made
to the director of the office of expert
ment stations. U. S. department of agri-
culture, Washington, D. G.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1907-08-23
DRINKING Excuses.

Excuses for drinking are always at
hand. Here are the five familiar ones:
Good wine, friend. or being dry.
Or lest we should be by and by
Or any other reason why.
If they don't suffice one can always
fall back upon DR.. Sam Johnson's,
HE who makes beast Of himself
gets rid Of the pain Of being g man."
On the other hand, here are three rea-
sons, one Of them cogent, that Bos-
tonian gave for not drinking:
"F1rst.-I can't drink, for I've just
lost near relative. Second (when
much pressed). - No. really can't
You know I'm president of a temper
ance society. Third (when he was
much more pressed).-No. l can't In
deed. I've just had four or five cock
tails. "-Boston Globe.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1907-08-23
TIE POOR CAT.
One Occasion When the Animal Old
Not Come Back.

One Occasion When the Animal Old
Not Como Back.
When the cat died the whole family
went into mourning, figuratively II not
literally. No common back door cat
this. but one that must be buried with
al honor. The question was how and
where.
Some one proposed cremation, but
this was rejected on the ground that
Il sounded too much like lynching. 1t
was finally proposed that the father,
who had to cross ferry every day to
his place Of business, should drop it
overheard, and as burial at sea rath-
Or appealed to the sentimental attitude
Of the family this idea was received
eavorably.
The following morning the remains
Of the cat were made into a package
and securely tied. 1t was lovely day.
and the ferryboat was crowded with
passengers, and what had seemed SO
simple at home assumed unexpected
difficulties in the face of curious
crowd, ready to imagine anything and
to put the worst construction on an ap-
palently mysterious action.
Finally it occurred to the father that
the best time would be the evening,
and he could slip the cat overheard
without attracting notice in the dusk
Through the day 1t occupied a corner
Of his Office, and he was glad when the
time came for the return trip.
uN {<05
out in the stream and then, glancing
around furtively. laid his hand on the
package. Suddenly it struck him what
would seem strange in broad daylight
would seem doubly so ut night
With smothered groan he replaced
It on the seat beside him. There was
no help for it-he would have to carry
It home again.
As he took his seat in the train that
was to convey him the rest Of the way
be placed the cat on the shelf above
bis head and for the first time that
day forgot all about It. Hurrying to
get off the car when he reached his
destination. he was halted by some one
behind him. who thrust into his hand
the Ill fated package.
When he reached his house he threw
It down on chair in the hall and went
In to supper. In the middle Of 1t the
maid came In and asked how she
should cook the meat he had brought
with him?"
"Meatv be exclaimed. "That isn't
meat f! It's
But at this moment the maid pro-
duced the package and showed him q
choice piece Of meat. History does not
say what the man said who got tho
cat.-New York Sun.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1907-08-23
The Indirect Method.

Homemade ice cream was regular
item on the bill of fare at Willie's
house, and while he liked the cream he
drew the line at turning the freezer.
One day when his mother returned
home she was agreeably surprised to
find him working at the crank as II his
life depended on 1t.
II don't see how you got him to turn
the ice cream freezer" she said to her
husband. II offered him dime to do
1t, and he Just laughed at me-"
''You didn't go about it the right
way, my DEAR" replied her husband.
II bet him a nickel he couldn't turn 1t
for half an hour."-Harper's Weekly.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1907-08-23
A Dogs Jealousy.

Dana Is a huge st. Bernard who has
his own ideas as to his importance.
Whenever he wishes to attract atten-
ton he knocks his water pail over and
then rolls it around, growing at It and
making a great fuss. Then he puts
his head in and throws the pail high
In the air, batting at It with his paws
as 1t comes down. II this does not
have the desired effect he picks up
the pail by the handle and takes It into
the barn, where the noise is increased
by far owing to the wooden door. This
performance is given whenever the
horse is petted or when strangers come
to the house. Chicago Tribune.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1907-08-23
Shoppino In London.

One Of the first things an American
man or woman rushes out to buy In
London Is serviceable well cut mack
intosh, and the second article to be
purchased is usually an umbrella. A
man can buy In London a smart wa
terproof which with occasional reproof-
ing will last him lifetime for 3 or 4
guineas. In New York a very bad imi-
tation will cost him from $40 to $50.
The British umbrella Is not only a
thing of beauty in workmanship, but
It will outlast all competitors across
the seas.-London Express.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1907-08-23
Coal Combustion.

There is enough explosive energy in
a grateful of coal. If it could be liber-
ated and controlled, to hurl a 1000
pound projectile through foot of solid
steel. But there can be no explosion
without oxygen, and the ceal in the
crate will not burn faster than the sup
ply Of air which reaches it will permit.
If the coal could be furnished all at
once with enough air to effect it's COM
plete combustion, it would explode
with as great violence as IL it were SO
much dynamite.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1907-08-23
Greenwich Observatory.

In the year 1875 King Charles II. Of
England founded the royal observatory
at Greenwich In order that astronom-
ical observations might be made for
the assistance of sailors. The history
Of the observatory has been the his
tory Of chronology and OF this practi-
cal side Of astronomy. tn work and
its standards have become distinctly
international. The meridian Of Green.
witch now determines the longitude Of
the wofjd.-Exchange.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1907-08-23
Trcssurer.s Rcport.

For school district No. O., Penbina
county, N. D., for the Year, 1905 and
1907.
Cash on hand at beginning Of
school year, July LIST, 1908 -, ss4S 81
Total amount received during the
year from the apportionment Of
the state tuition fund. .422 SO
Total amount received during the
year from the apportionment of
the county tuition fund .222 p
Amount received during the year
from taxes levied by the district
school board, including outstand-
ing warrants redeemed or endors-
ed in the collection of taxes. .355 16
Total receipts for the year, includ-
ing cash on hand July LIST, 17O6l849 80
EXPENDITURES:
Amount paid during the year for
school houses, sites and furni-
ture Observation-Disclosures OF
Amunt paid during the year for
apparatus. fixtures, etc. 20 "a
Amount paid during the year for
teachers wages Enthusiastically $50 90
Amount paid dur ng the year for
shviccs and expenses of school
OtncerS.. .......... 69 w
Amount paid during the year for
incidental expenses. III 20
Amount paid during the year for
for purposes not before mention
ed ........... ................ IL 5O
Total expenses for theyear. .. {. 1892 96
Cash on hand June 9th, 1907 -. .656 ~
Grand. total expenditure and cash
on hand to balance above total
receipts 1649 30
CLERKS STATEMENT OF INDIE
BTEDFESS OF DISTRICT 4
Whole amount of warrants out
standing June 30th 1907 5000. 55 90
Total indebtedness of district
June Both, 1907. 55 90
Approved this 9th day of July A. D,
1907.
By order of the district school board.
SVEINN JOHNSON
Clerk.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1907-08-23
Her Perversity.

Her Perversity.
"Come out this evening"" said Sub
bulbs, land I'm sure you'll get good
dinner"
II thought you had no cook now" re-
piled Gilman.
"She doesn't leave until tomorrow.
She'll do her best this evening Just to
make us realize how much we'll miss
her when she's gone. Exchange.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1907-08-23
Mixed.

Here IL mixture Of kingdoms, II not
Of metaphors, taken from history ex-
animation paper: "He stretched his
sultry length beneath the eve trees
shade" "Away back as far as the time
Of Jack Cartier England sent her ships
into Hudson bay to trade beads and
muskets with the Indians for ivory of
the walrus tree. Century.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1907-08-23
To Hide. Them.

"Why Is Jones growing beardr'
"Oh, I believe his wife made him {
present Of some ties" Punch.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1907-08-23
Not an Export Opinion,

Not an Expert Opinion.
He has Just returned from Mexi.
co. He says a Mexican burro IL tho
most agsravatingiy stubborn thing on
earth"
.Hs isn't married."-Houston Post.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1907-08-23

When there u no good withiD no good
comes out-Dutch Provefb.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1907-03-15

Uncle Sam to be of such Importance
that the crew is not obliged to leave
the vessel, even in order to save life.
but it has never happened that these
men have allowed a shipwrecked sailor
or crew to go unaided.
Without the two great octagonal
copper framed lights, each weighing a
ton, which every night of the year dur.
ing fair weather and storms cast their
beacon-like rays from the masts of this
lightship for the benefit Of the thous-
ands of vessels sailing outside Nan
tucket Island, this part of the coast
would be avoided as were the Scvlla
and Charybdis of old.
AS it is, 500 vessels have been
wrecked and lost around Nantucket,
and it is only the courage and con-
stancy Of these men aboard the lonely
little midocean monitor that has kept
the total from mounting up far into
the thousands.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1907-03-15

America Is going to the extreme in
music, so far as financial extravaganza
is concerned. According to conserva-
tive estimates, the people of this coun-
try, will spend ten million dollars on
this form of amusement between No
vember, 1906, and April, 1907. Includ-
ed in this estimate is only the better
class Of music, the comic operas, mu-
steal comedies and so-called ""attrac-
lions" of this type not being consider
ed at all.
America has become music mad
mad In Its desire to hear music that
it does not always understand, and
musicians whom it does not always
value rightly. A musical obsession has
taken hold Of the people, and, having
the necessary money to pay the de-
mands OF those wise enough to realize
the extent OF this newborn craze, we
are now bearing the best there is
in music at Europe's artistic expense.
As a matter Of fact, there were not
twenty really first-class singers and in
strnmentalists left in Europe on De-
cember first. for the almighty dollar"
Is patent attraction to even so inn
practical a being as the average mu-
sician.-Success Magazine.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1907-03-15
[1IHXj!Ei<S51IIA''|<2s|
e!sxA
o~o~o-o-~o-o-oo-


Put two cupfuls of white Sr.
one-th1rd as much water on +be n q
a saucepan. Boil to the "tbroo, u'e
is, until the candy will form "a
when dropped from the spoon l p,S
candy in a warm place WHORE ;,
not boil, and then drop in two a.. =,
pieces Of the fruit. Carefully re.
with a fork, and put it on = n. ., y
plate. Be careful not TO 81. '"
candy, as that would mako j.
sugar. Put in more fruit and Iis.
carefully III the same way and - y
candy should begin to sugar add w.
and boil until it reaches the samo
again. Continue the dipning ninth
the pieces of fruit are covered vi,,
perfectly transparent and dry o,,.
candy. Nothing could he mattfor d.
a small cut-glass dish heaped m r;1
these fruits.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1907-03-15
The Old Maid Aunfs.

If you want to be interested, visit a
family where there IS but one baby
and two or three old maid aunts. Sis
tiers always love each other in a way
to attract admiration, and an old maid
loves her sisters baby almost as much
as the mother. And away down deep
in her heart an old maid thinks the
baby loves her as much as it loves its
mother If we could have our wish we
would wish to be a baby in a family
where there are two or three old maid
aunts; then we would receive attention.
-Atchison Globe.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1907-03-15
NEW IDEA OF CONSUMPTION,
London Doctor Says the Disease Is
Primarily Derived From Cattle.

London Doctor Says the Disease Is
Primarily Derived From Cattle.
A London physician, Dr. w Picket
Turner, who has made a first-hand
study of the disease for many years,
ADVANCES the theory that the medical
world is attacking the problem of con-
sumption by an utterly false route.
His view, briefly stated, is that tub
erculosis is an animal disease primar-
lily derived, in all cases, from cattle.
1t belongs, he says, to the mycotic
group Of diseases, diseases in which
the original source of Infection is a
plant. Bovine cattle derive tubercu-
losis from timothy and other allied
grasses by natural affinity.
Man acquires the disease by inges-
ton Or incubation, never by inhala-
ton. 1t is not hereditary; neither is
there any predisposition to it in the
individual. The bacillus in state Of
nature Is saprophyte, feeding on decay
of the vegetable world But the bacil-
1us becomes pathogenic-caDable of
causing disease-in cattle when. thew
are deprived of actinism or the prop
erty Of the chemical rays in sunlight
1t would, If all this be true, become
reasonable to assume that bv restoring
actlnism to cattle the bacillus would
again become a saprohpyte, in which
case consumption would be extirpated.
Current Literature.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1907-03-15
Crocodiles and the Cure

One does not usually connect croco-
diles with health resort-rather the
reverse-but the creatures are quite a
feature of the Indian bathing place of
Manghapir, about nine miles from Ka-
rachi. This town Is place of pilgrim
age for pious Hindoos, but 1t is chiefly
famous for the value of it's waters in
the cure Of the dread scourge of lep-
rosy. The waters are hot, and more
than 90 per cent of the sufferers who
battle there annually, it is said, are
cured. The crocodiles are rather note
worthy in that they live in the hot
water, APPARENTLY suffering no incon-
venience from it's temperature or medi-
cinal qualities.-Wide World Maya
zine.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1907-03-15

Of "salt horse,' potatoes and parsnips)
and the pork jumps into the molasses
Because during heavy gales water
washes over decks in clean sweep,
the portfolios of the berth deck and
cabins which are below decks are never
opened.
Sometimes the rolling of the ship is
such as to render seasick even those
tried old lightship salts, many of whom
have spent years whaling and grown
accustomed to the crows nest" a
masthead lookout, where the pitching
and rolling of a ship is most notice
able. In fact, NAL de mer is very
common on board the lightship.
Of all the perils that overhang the
Nantucket Shoals lightshp's crew,
however, the direst is that of acting
as life savers in a case where a vessel
has gone on the shoals or foundered
in the sea within sight. But it's a
peril which these brave seamen never
finch from.
The lives of these men aboard this
particular lightship are considered by
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1907-03-15
LEAD LONELY LIVES.
MOST DANGEROUS LIGHTSHIP
STATION IN THE WORLD.
That Maintained by Uncle Sam on
Nantucket, Mass, Is Noted
Hardy SaiIormen Who Constantly
Face PeriIS in Many Forms.

Probably upon no reef guard station
and bold men been so often haZarded
os up on the Nantucket Shoals light
ship, which is located forty miles south
from Nantucket, Mass. More than half
a century has elapsed since the govern
ment first stationed a lightship at this
dangerous and lonesome spot. Until
recently the lightship was sail
! equipped vessel, but now it is steam
propelled; yet whether operated by
steam or sail the dangers and hard
ships of the men confined on it are
one and the same.
| Forty miles out at sea, cooped in
the little shell that, day after day and
month after month, swings and tugs
at its 7,0OO-pound anchor lying in IS
| fathoms of water, the life of the Nan
tucket lightship sailorman is one Of
almost complete isolation from the
first of November until the opening of
the spring months. During the bit
! terest six months of the year there are
no reprieves or shore leave.
Sometimes for two months or more,
during the severest periods of the win
ter, these dozen men are without COM
munication with the shore save the
messages sent to them by wireless
telegraphy. Often for days their only
visible companion is the great red
brown buoy swinging in the sea half
! a mile from the ship.
| Even this object, which is endear-
ed to the heart of every man aboard
the lightship, in particularly bad
weather breaks adrift from it's moor
F, ings or is frequently shut out from
sight for weeks by the dense fogs which
! drift in over the ocean like a pail from
the southwark, and then the melan-
choly of the loneliness which pervades
these men is not lifted until a close
passing vessel or the infrequent adj
vent Of the winter sunlight comes to
chase away the monotony of their
existence
But loneliness is only one of the
| hardshlps of the men on the Nantucket
Shoales lightship, though it is the one
dreaded. There are the days when
the fog settles down over the isolated
vessel in thick, damp cloak, COM
pletely enshrouding the hulk from stem
to stern-days when only the far off
sound of a passing steamers ghostly
whistle or a sailing vessels horn, or
the systematic roar Of the steam fog
horn aboard the lightship, is all their
world
Once for twelve consecutive nights