davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15
AYHAWKER JOTS

F. d. Coburn says that he has the
best job there is. and wouldn't leave
1t to become president of the United
States. And the funny part of it is
that people generally believe Coburn
really means what he says.
Reports from some of the north
ern counties of the state are that the
corn crop has all dried up. The same
about the wheat crop IN Barton coun-
ty-and now Barton claims that 1t
will raise 100000 bushels.
Hutchinson Independent: Kansas,
which believes in advertising and has
practiced the art for years. should not
around the Chautauqua circle, where
he has been giving the Sunfiower
state a good string of advertising that
costs nothing.
Up in Nebraska it is claimed that
twenty creameries have been forced
to suspend business because rates on
hauling cream were made so low to
the big creameries that the little ones
couldn't exist. This is a pointer to
the Kansas board of railroad commits
sioners in fixing up their new sched-
ule of freight rates
Everybody should unite and pray
earnestly for the ripening of the Kan
sas cantalope and watermelon. Rocky
Ford nutmegs- Texas-are now
Is cents apiece-peaches are 40 cents
basket, oranges 60 cents a dozen,
and other fruit in proportion. The
only fruit Kansas will raise this year
will be melons and potatoes.
Down in Arkansas City they have
City Traveller tells all about how to
see it by getting UP at o'clock in the
morning and looking thirty degrees
above the horizon a little north OF
east. 1t seems that comets are In
class by themselves. They are not in
terfered with by the telegraphers
strike. MS 49, n--7.ll
Chautauqua assemblies do not al
ways lose money. The one up at Clay
Center came out s641 ahead of the
must be foxy! lot in order to save
that. much from the amusement syn
dictates whose object 1t is to gobble
up all the proceeds and then take a
the balance.
About the next thing which is due
for a thorough overhauling in Kansas
is the chicanery and manipulation
which has characterized the sale of
the Kansas school lands. The legis-
lature passed laws which opened the
doors wide for skulduggery, and now,
the horse having been distracted, the
legislature will see that the doors are
carefully closed and padlocked-
The Salina Journal advises the peo-
pie of Kansas to be, more careful than
usual in selecting state. senator's for
the next session of the legislature so
that the lodge" may not control that
body again. Well, there is this con-
ISOLATION: if the lodge" is reinstated
in power, it will indicate that people
prefer to be ruled by political bosses
The issue is clearly observable with
the naked eye. and there need be no
mistake.
The announcement that Joy Nor
ton. head of the Kansas salt trust, is
Going +o start an indeDendent oil re-
finery ought to make John D. Rookie
Teller tremble. The only question
thus far undecided is. what name Will
Mr. Morton give toa rthess sidetrack
leading to his oil refinery, over which
sidetrack he will make traffic ar
rangement'' with the "other rail-
roads" and collect a switching fee in
lieu of a rebate?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15
GLOBE SIGHTS.

IFrom the Atchison Globe.
Idle people spend a good deal of time
at telephones.
How a man will roar at Fate if he
| Loses job he didn't try to hoidi
A farmers idea of laziness is to let
the sun beat you at getting up in the
morning.
If it were not for the funerals. there
Wouldn't be any family reunions in some
families.
The man who has fish given him is the
only one who feels obliged to believe
fish stories.
The average mans idea of religious
liberty is the privilege of staying home
from church.
The man who is too fat. or too old.
to run, always seems to have the most
trouble with his hat blowing Off
How disappointed the average girl is
when she shows young man her photo
and he doesn't ask her for one!
The man who says he lives "c1ose to
nature" is not the one you will find
doing The heavy work on a farm.
Every man would be pretty we'll salts
fed If he were important as a book
agent tries to make him believe.
A really popular young man is one
who can show the visiting girl a good
time without damaging his local
fences.
The man who thinks he is wise enough
he is good enough to keep out of trouble.
Ifitis referred to as financial trans
action" there is probably less real
money involved than If it were merely
called q deal"
There are many qualities which may
go toward making a man a favorite with
his fellows, but wearing good clothes
isn't among them.
Gossip is more entertaining than sta
tistics, and for the average man about
as effective as a means of acquiring re-
liable information.
Lectures on economy don't reduce
boys expenditures for peanuts and
iicorice until he wants to save money to
buy skates or a baseball outfit.
A woman may have the milk man, the
grocer and the butcher blurred but she
always tries to be diplomatic in her
dealings with the washer-woman.
A scientist asserts that a sperm whale
could swallow an automobile. Don't be
snrnrised If you see a few sperm whales
fopping around some farmers barn
yard.
We have noticed that people who do
exactly as they please, whether their
friends like 1t or not, get along about
as well as those who are always trying
to please.
Pictures OF last years graduates in
from the parlor to the spare bedroom, to
make room on the parlor shelf for this
years crop.
All man gets for rocking the baby
to sleep is that it wakens and cries when
he attempts to put it in bed, and his wife
says, For PHYS sake, why don't you
wait until it is asleep"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15
THE AIR SHIP AS PEACENfAKER.

Wars experiences have gone TO
prove that the soldier who faces bull
lets and shrapnel in the field with ap-
parent unconcern shows distinct signs
| Of nervousness if not of something
else known by a harsher name when
shells begin to drop into fortifica-
ton seemingly from the sky above
observes the war critic on the Chi
cage Evening Post. The thing that a
man can face and that he knows Is
coming is less fearful than that which
comes Unexpectedly and "out or no.
where"
| In the old days mortar firing was
not particularly accurate; it is not
absolutely accurate today, but there
has been a marked Improvement in
the methods of finding the range and
In gauging the proper charge of pow
der for the distance to be covered by
the shell. Men behind ramparts are
afraid of the shell that drops in on
them, wholly unwelcome and dam
gerous visitor against which the door
can not be closed. The shells, how
ever, don't drop often enough to de-
moralize the garrison--but how will
it be when the air ship is perfected?
The French have built an air ship
which is now government property,
able to go at the will of the helms
man with the wind, In the teeth of
the wind and across the wind. 1t can
sustain it's fight with four men on
board for nearly two hours. If
Wellman's Arctic exploration air ship
proves to be a success there will be
at the command of nations an en-
CINE of war that can sail for days.
Then what?
The horrors that would follow the
appearance over a camp or forti-
hcation of the enemy of one of these
sky-fying demons armed with high
explosives have been pictured time
and again, but the pictures doubtless
fall short of the realities as man may
one day know them. The air ships
may make war so awful a thing that
they will make permanent peace GER
tain. They will have not have been
conceived and constructed in vain If
such be the happy end. but the
chances are that more horror chap
tiers of history must be written before
the war book of the world can be
closed and sealed.
At The Hague conference the ma
lions representatives have sanctioned
rule that no air ship shall drop its
death dealers into an unfortified
town. A British suggestion to extend
the rule to fortified places failed to
arouse enthusiasm. 1t may not be
long before the war that Sherman
said was hell will be something SO
much worse that the figure of speech
will lose all Its strength. However, If
the air ship conquers a worlds peace
1t can not sail on it's mission any too
soon
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15
THE srAY-Ar-HonfE.

Let others go and SURROGATE
IN chambers six by nine
AnSse torrld nights hammock strung
Upon the roof is fine.
H1ile prolnng on sandy beach
some 1oollsh folks may please.
much prefer with book and pipe
AT home to take my ease.
I on re WELCOME in your morning dip
Wfthln the rolling deep.
w mere crabs are fastened to your toes
ana cells around you cretp.
MY tub of pure white porcelain,
As clean as clean can be,
with sparkling shower bath attached.
Is good enough for me.
have glass of something cool
And musical with Ice,
And yet l do not have to pay
:. a dollar-wrecking price
What's that you sayr To pack my things,
You've got a pass for two.
OF course, I'll go and spend a month
Beside the briny blue.
New York Press.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
IFrom the Chicago News.J

IFrom the Chicago News.]
Water is music when a fountain
plays.
Pawnbrokers are the advance agents
of hard times.
Usually it is the green youth who
paints the town red.
Most of us expect lot of things we
have no reason to expect.
Mustard plasters also come under the
head of drawing materials.
Pantaloons of justice can hardly be
termed breaches of the peace.
A man has no right to stone his wife
but he may rock his baby.
Astronomers and theatrical managers
are always looking out for new stars.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS
HOME NEWS WINE AWAY.

Subscribers of the State Tournal
AWAY during the summer may have
the paper mailed regularly each day
TO any address at the rate of ten cents
IN week or thirty cents q month (by
mail only. Address changed as often
as desired. While out OF town the
State Journal will be TO you like a
daily letter from home.
Advance payment is requested on
these short time subscriptions, 20 save
bookkeeping expense.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15
HUNOR or THE Day

Knicker-Love makes the world go
round Rocker-Then what makes the
square deal?-New York Sun.
new hat "Indeed?" Yes 1t went
to her Observation-Disclosures Sentinel.
The thermometer was registered 9s
degrees in the shade, as the gasping
wedding procession came up the church
aisle, the groom in all the heated ag-
on1es of full dress. wilt thou" be-
gan the minister But the bridegroom
can.
If Shakspeare were alive today"
Well?" IT presume they would call
him an author-dramatist-pla playwright
manager ducer."-Pittsbur Post.
Mr.. Jolly-There's one thing I like
about Miss Barker. She never talks
deed. She spends all her time talking
about herself.-Smart Set.
The banks attache, caught with the
goods on him, surrendered the money
and made full confession. 1--WE been
a paying teller for years.'-Philadel-
phia Ledger.
Her Husband during the spat)-
Don't you think for minute that you
can impose on me. There are no fools
in our family. His Wife-Why, John,
you forget yourself!-Chicago News.
Your wife needs exercise; she sits
still too much" I'll get her a silk
skirt" How will that help?" "Sheu
keep moving so as to make it rustic
Houston Post
80 you don't take any interest in
the Baconian theory?" mot a Bit
answered Mr.. Stormington Barnes
It's hard enough to get people to act
Shakespeare without bothering about
who wrote it."-Washington Star
Now that you've come in for a lit
tie money" said Zimmerman, IT hope
you'll pay me what you owe me-"
Lets see said Borroughs Your
names Zimmerman isn't it? Sorry,
old man, but I'm paying off all my
creditors in alphabetical order''-Phil-
adeIphia Press.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR
rFrom the New York Press.]

When a man is glad to be bald
headed it was red.
One way not to have a big family is
to be able to support it.
A bank account is something you
would have If you didn't need it.
A girl will swear it's a love letter
even If it's a first-of-the-month bill.
Children have very sweet dispositions
not to resent being told they look like
their father.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

of blotting paper, today against tram
tickets. The man who takes heed of
all these warnings must lead an ex-
istenee that will turn his hair gray
long before its proper time.-Daily
Graphic.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

Colonel ]. G. Waters is nearly 20
years old, has written poetry all his
life but frankly says that poets are a
nuisance and that nothing he has writ
ten deserves to live.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

An increase of forty thousand in
population is not so bad for Kansas and
the best thing about 1t is that a large
part of the increase is in Western Kan
eas counties
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

Booker T. Washington is the kind of
a man of whom any race might be
proud. He never sings in a minor key
and his face is always turned to the
ann
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

Fred r. Moore, the New York negro
who told the members of the Western
Negro Press association that they
whine too much is surely not going to
run for Office
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

If any one thinks that the negro race
has made no. progress in America a
visit to the National Negro Business
Mems league will prove an eye opener.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

The telegraph is not everything as is
evidenced by the fact that Kansas has
kept in pretty close touch with the
world notwithstanding the strike.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

William Biddle, penitentiary direc-
tor. is trying his hand as a pugilist.
The strange thing about 1t is that he
should attack a newspaper man.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

Harry Bone Is winning laurels for
himself prosecuting the promoters of
the Lost Bullion mining swindle in
Denver. 1t takes a Kansas man to get
90 the bottom OF things.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

Wichita is taking up the plan of
government by 70. com mission with a
vim Colonel Murdoch of the Eagle
Is against the reform
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

The millers' trust is given 30 days to
answer Attorney General Jackson's
questions. 1t will take longer than 80
days to answer some of them.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

There seems to be two factions in
the Kansas federation of labor-those
that are out who want in and those
who are in that want to be let alone.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15
A QUESTION.

Was the editor of the Atchison Globe
thinking of Kansas railroad commits
sioners or the Democratic party when
he wrote the following %Globe Sight:.
Some people spend half their time
telling what they~fntend to do, and the
other half explaining why they didn't
do it"-Holton Recorder.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

The Topeka fifteen-year-old girl who
wanted to have "a time and then
reform is like the drunkard who in
tends to reform after he has had just
one more drink
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

president is not telegraph operator
and doesn't know the Morse code from
Hebrew.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

It is reported that Oklahoma people
are refusing to er,thuse over politics
The mercury has been standing at 100
in the shade in Oklahoma.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

John d. Rockefeller is afraid the
country is going to the dogs. He need
not worry for he has enough laid up
to put him beyond the reach of
Denury
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

1t cost the International Topographic
cal union three million and a half dol
lars to establish an eight hour day,
but 1t was worth all it cost.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

Complaints come from Eastern Kan
sas that the wet weather has damaged
the wheat and retarded threshing-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

Frank Ryan of the board of railroad
commissioners is showing a disposf
ton to be rather Independent.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

Colonel N. H. Loomis must be feel
ing rather Insignificant. He hasn't
been offered a new job for a month
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

1t is reported that Taft is back at
work. No one has heard of him loafing
any during the last month OF two.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

The flower Of the colored race in
America is in Topeka this week.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

Ex-Governor w. E. Stanley is still
in bad health. He is in Colorado.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

1t is said in Washington that Presd-
dent Roosevelt will keep out Of the
strike. This is just as well as the
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

There is no use to stay any longer in
Colorado.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

The corn in Kansas has been saved
again.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15
FROM OTHER PENS
PROHIBITION IN THE SOUTH.

PROHIBITION IN THE SOUTH.
The prohibition wave which is
sweeping over the south seems to be
gathering strength The action of the
Georgia legislature in enacting abso-
lutte prohibition from January 1 next
has stimulated the prohibition work
ers all over the south. Alabama is
seriously agitating similar laws,
though no action will now be taken
until the next session of the legis-
lature. Tennessee is almost COM
pletely in the possession of the pro-
hibitionists. After the first of Oc-
tober only three cities in the state, to
wit, Memphis, Nashville and Chatta-
nooga, will sell liquor. The traffic has
been forbidden in all other cities by
local option votes, but the Tennes-
seeans are not stopping here. Nearly
all the Incorporated cities that have
gone dry are passing the most rigid
laws, forbidding liquors received from
the outside to be delivered, the pur-
pose being to prevent, in so far as can
be done without infringing the inter-
ages containing liquor-Philadelph
Ledger.
WHEAT CROP IN NEBRASKA.
In southern Nebraska the wheat
harvest is so great that the railroads
are congested; there is not enough
motive power to make the side tracks
clear, and this week wheat will begin
to move from the northern part of the
state. OF course this does not prove
anything regarding the wheat output
of Minnesota and the Dakotas. but 1t
Is calculated to make people hesitate
a little about accepting at their face
value the stories OF a few days ago
that in those states the wheat was so
terribly poor that 1t would hardly pay
to run harvesting machines over the
fields. 1t isn't often that there is so
wonderful disparity between crop
conditions in Nebraska and in the
states Immediately north of it.-PhiIa-
delphia Record.
THE HEARST WEDGE.
Using the Independent league that
he is organizing in as many states as
ne Is able as wedge, Mr.. Hearst is
planning to split open the Democratic
party along the lines of natural cleav-
age where possible or through erup-
tive breaks where these abound. That
party has gone through so many
seismic turmoils that it is little more
than volcanic wreck, and the am
bilious candidate for first honors
should not meet with serious diff
fculties in reducing a number of
state organizations to the factional
Observation-Disclosures American
THE LIFE SAVER,
DR.. William Thomson, who died on
saturday. was one of the worlds
benefactors. He saved a multitude of
lves and introduced improved meth
DDS OF army hospital service that have
been copied by all nations; yet he had
not the fame of a third-class general.
The world still thinks much less of
tnoSe VINO save lives than of those
who destroy them.=Philadelphia IN
quirer.
NOTHING SERIOUS.
notwithstanding thesalarm of Judge
Jenkins 1t is hardly probable that
there viii be a civil war over the two
cent railroad fare question.-Indian-I
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15
KANSAS COMMENT
NOT TIRED

NOT TIRED.
Seneca has a rest room" for farm
ers wives and daughters. Perhaps
this Is a necessity in Seneca, where
the women can have some place to
stay and rest while their husbands
talk politics at the court house or in
dulge in worse habits, at places even
worse than the court house. Now in
Holton 1T is different. When the
average Jackson county couple comes
to town nine times out of ten the
husband gets through with his bust
ness long before his wife gets all her
shopping done, and has to wait on
ner. As we have mighty little politics
In Holton and no saloons or billiard
nails or pool rooms, the old man has
an exceedingly lonesome time of it
until his women folks get ready to go
nome Judging from their looks and
actions there are but few Jackson
county women who need a rest when
they come to town, at least any other
rest than they get shopping and look
ing at pretty things in the stores
Hoiton Recorder
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15
COMPARATIVE.

Still that huge fine against the Stand
ard Oil Co, was no more proportion
ately than that against the church pew
and school desk trust, also imposed
by Judge Lands. When you consider
the number of offenses of which the
Standard was convicted and the in
come of the corporations the fine was
not so enormous as the huge sum in
itself first Hutchinson News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15
THE LIFE SAVER!
NOTHING Srp1n1rs

notwithstanding thesalarm of Judge
Jenkins 1t is hardly probable that
there viii be civil war over the two
apolis Star
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

Knicker-Love makes the world go
round. Rocker-Then what makes the
square deal?-New York Sun.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

IF Shakespeare were alive today
Well?" IT presume they would call
him an author-dramat ist-playwright-
ducer.'-Pittsburg Post.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

She positively went crazy over her
new hat" "Indeed?" Yes. 1t went
to her head '-Milwaukee Sentinel.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

The banks attache caught with the
goods on him, surrendered the money
and made full confession. 1--WE been
a. paying teller for ears.'-Philadel-
phia Ledger.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15
THE DRAFT PRECEDENT.

Mr.. Stubs has intimated that his
training and inclinations are all along
legislative lines and that he has no
inclination to be governor. If Mr..
Stubs will allow his mind to revert
back some four years he will remem-
Der Kansas editor who declared that
his training and inclinations were all
along printing lines and that he had
evidently wanted to be state printer and
wanted it badly, yet Mr.. Stubs had
Mr.. Hoch drafted as a candidate for
governor. Mr.. Stubs established
thereby a precedent which he seems to
be 10th to follow.-Eolton Recorder.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-15

Mr.. Jolly-There's one thing 1 like
about Miss Barker. She never talks
about anybody. Miss Sneerwell-No, in
deed. She spends all her time talking
about herself.-Smart Set.