davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09
- - - -'-- -
WAS BEYOND THE PALE.
The Reason Chaucer is Not In Society
Now.

A friend of James Whitcomb Riley
tells of an occasion when the humor'
list, who is as a rule, extremely averse
to social functions, was induced to at
tend literary" dinner In Indian
apolis given in honor Of a novelist OF
that city.
Riley had been told off to take in to
dinner the sister of his host, an excel
lent woman, though anything but
literary"
Tie conversation touching upon the
beauties of Chaucer, about whom a
certain set of the city was then culti-
waiting a fad, spirited discussion en-
sued, during which the bewildered sis
ter caught from time to time only the
name "Chaucer."
At last she whispered to Riley:
"Who Is this Mr.. Chaucer they're talk
ing about so much? Is he very popu-
lar in society,""
Madam" solemnly responded Riley,
"that man did something that forever
shuts him out Of society,"
"Heavens" exclaimed the worthy
dame; "and what was that?"
AHe died several hundred years
ago said Riley.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09
SETTLED BY TIE WAITER.
All Doubt About the Pineapple For
ever Set at Rest.

William c.. Whitney, Jr., who has
spent year in Indian Territory learn
ing practical mining at Quapaw, de-
soribed at a dinner party in New York
a Quapaw restaurant.
"At this restaurant one evening, "
he said at his descriptions end, two
miners near me got into a botanical
argument about the pineapple, one
claiming that 1t was fruit and the
other that it was vegetable.
In the midst of their argument the
waiter entered in his shirtsleeves and
looked about to see what was the
cause of the loud talking.
"The miners decided to let the wait
er settle their argument, and accord
ingly one of them said:
Pete, what is a pineapple? Is II
fruit or a vegetable?'
"The waiter, flicking the ashes from
his cigar, smiled at the two men with
pity.
Its neither, gents he said. It's
an extra" ,
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09
THOUGHT 1T TIME TO STOP.
Wonders Of the Telephone Too Much
for Sitting Bull.

c. ]. H. Woodbury., the engineering
expert of the telephone company, told
the boot and shoe men the other night
the true version Of the Sitting Bull
and telephone story, says the Boston
Herald. Sitting Bull had been cap.
tured by the United States troops and
was held in close confinement. So
also was another obstreperous Indian,
held in confinement at post about
100 miles away. The officer in charge
of Sitting Bull had been chasing the
Indians for two months, and was Won
dering what he would do with the cap
tive. In an inspired moment he de-
cided to arrange an interview between
the two Indians over the telephone.
After the necessary ringing up Sitting
Bull was asked If he cared to talk into
the machine. He talked into it for
several minutes and did a heap of
listening also.
He put down the instrument finally,
and for hours was even more gloomy
than usual, at last beginning to talk
to himself, something very rare for
the Indian. Asked If he was dissatis-
fed with his accommodations or If
there was anything they could do for
him he broke forth at last:
"No. I'm finished. It's all right
when the white mans plaything talkD
the white mans language; but when
1t learns to talk the red mans tongue
It's time to stop"
It is believed in the west, where
the incident is fairly we'll known, that
this talk over the telephone between
the two Indians had considerable in
fiuence in shortening the Indian wars
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09
Now Look Out For Rheumatism.

The grip has been unusually
prevalent during the past winter,
and in many cases is likely to be
followed by an attack of muscular
rheumatism. This is the most
common variety of that disease
and least dangerous. There is no
swelling of the joints and the pain
is not so excruciating as in acute
or inhammatory rheumatism. 1t
is sufficiently severe to disable a
man, however, and every move
ment increases the pain. Keep as
quiet as possible and apply
Chamberlain's Pain Balm freely
with a thorough massage, and you
are certain to get quick relief.
This liniment is for sale by Ar
cadia Valley Drug Co.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09
Sells Shoes "Broken In"

One clerk who had earned the repu-
tation of being the best saleswoman in
the shoe department was asked the
secret of her success.
II sell all the shoes that have been
returned" she explained. "The other
girls are afraid to show them, but
find them the best sellers. Our house
is liberal in it's treatment of dissatis-
fed customers, and we get back a
good many pairs Of shoes that have
been worn around the house until they
are partly broken in. These shoes are
much more comfortable than brand
new pair. The soles may be trife
soiled, but the customer who puts ease
above every other consideration does
not mind that, con- equently sell
shoes while the other girls only fiji
them on."--N. Y. Globe.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09
READY TO TAKE NOTES.
Cruel Husband Had Stenoerapher to
Record Wife's Remarks.

Frederic Irland, at the last conven-
tion of the National Association of
Stenographers at Atlantic City, said
of somewhat harsh rebuke that one
stenographer had administered to an
other:
"That rebuke was little to cruel,
was it not? 1t reminds me of the cru
city Of Washington mana piece
of cruelty wherein stenography played
an unwilling part.
"As this man came to bed one night
his wife said to him:
"Has the stranger gone; didn't
hear him.
"Oh, no, dear. He hasn't gone the
husband replied I have instructed
the maid to let him out in three or
four hours
"The wife looked amazed and stupe.
fled.
'What-why-who on earth Is he,
anyway she stammered.
"My DEAR said the husband, quiet
ly, he is shorthand reporter. You
see, I nearly always forget what you
say to me during your discourse from
II till two and sometimes go to sleep
while you're talking. So thought I'd
have your lecture written out tonight
and study it at my leisure. The young
man is all ready the door is open Sc
that he can hear you, and you may be-
gin as soon as you like"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09
Chamberlain's Cough Remedy Aids
Nature.

Medicines that aid nature are al
ways most effectual. Chamber
lain's Cough Remedy acts on this
plan. 1t allays the cough, re-
lieves the lungs, aids expectora-
ton, opens the secretions, and aids
nature in restoring the system to q
healthy condition. Thousands
have testified to it's superior ex-
cellence. For sale by Arcadia
Valley Drug Co.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09
A Well Known Fact

That no skin disease, whether from
internal or external origin, can long
withstand the two powerful germicides,
ZEMO and ZEMOTONE, they destroy
the germs that cause the disease, they
always cure. Writeforsample. E.W Rose
Med. Co., st, Louis. All Druggistssell it.
Arcadia Valley Drug %,
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09
Whooping Cough.

Ihave used Chamberlain's Cough
Remedy in my family in cases of
whooping cough, and want to tell
you that it is the best medicine |
have ever used.-W. F. CASTOR,
Posco, Ga. This remedy is safe
and sure. For sale by Arcadia
Valley Drug Go.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09

Highest market price paid for
Country Produce. When others
pay 12 1-2c per dozen for Eggs,
we pay 15c, and when others pay
zoe we pay you 25c. Remem-
ber, we buy Wool, Hides, Feath-
ers, Roots, Butter, Eggs, and all
farm products, and pay the high
est market price.
E. L. FARMHOUSE.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09

The best is the cheapest. This
is certainly true of paints. We
carry in stock a full line of the
Sherwin- Williams paints, floor
stains and varnishes. The kind
that is durable and won't fade.
Lopez Store Co.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09
NOTICE OF FINAL SETTLEMENT.

Notice is hereby given that the UNDER
signed, VIM. R. Edgar, Administrator with
will annexed, Of the estate Of Sarah M.
Emerson, deceased, will make Final Settle
ment of his accounts with said estate as such
Administrator, with will annexed, at the
next term Of the Probate Court of Iron
County, Missouri, to be holden at Ironton,
in said county, on the 13th day Of May, A..
D. 1907. VIM. r. EDGAR,
Administrator with Will Annexed.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09
IRONTON. MO. THURSDAY. NAY 8. 1901

supposed to result from the COM
bination of hydrogen and sulphur.
The other chemical elements are
iron, magnesia and sodium.
H. A. STOWELL.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09
Eczema is Now curabIe

zEMO, a scientific preparation for
external use. Stops itching instantly
and destroys the germs that cause skin
diseases. Eczema quickly yields and is
permanently cured by this remarkable
medicine. All Druggists. Write for SAM
pie. E. W. Rose Med. Co. st. Louis, Mo.
Arcadia Valley Drug Co.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09

For RENT-Building in Ironton,
formerly occupied by A. Roehry.
Suitable for store or other pur-
poses. Apply to L. A. Seitz, 1856
S. 4th street, st. Louis, Mo.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09
REGISTER Office for Job work. :

FOR SALE-The best Swift &
Co.'s Fertilizers and Poultry Bone,
also Northern Seed Rye, at IRON
ton Manufacturing Co.'s Flour
Mill.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09

For SALE-Two pool tables !;
one in frst-class order, the other
not so good. Bargain. Apply to
]. D. Brooks, Graniteville, Mo.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09
NOTICE OF FINAL SETTLEMENT.

Notice is hereby gwen that the under
signed, VIM. r. Edgar, Administrator de
bonis non, Of the estate Of ]. w. Emerson,
deceased, will make Final Settlement Of his
accounts with said estate as such Admins
traitor de bonis non, at the next term Of the
Probate Court Of Iron County, Missouri, to
be holden at Ironton, in said county, on
the 18th day of May, A. y. 1907
WIN. Il. EDGAR,
Administrator De Bonis Non.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09

For SALE-Two brood mares,
ten years old. Inquire of DR.. w.
j. Smith at Sanitarium. Also,
two cottages to rent.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09
H. WT. COLLIN S
LIVERY AND FEED STABLE<
IRONTON MO

NOTICE to Picnicers and Excursiouist--
~ Hacks, Spring Wagons, Single and
Double Buggies, Three-Seated Carriages,
Two-Seated Carriages, with competent
drivers; also, the best of Saddle Horses for
Ladies and Gentlemen can be had at
REASONABLE RATE.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09
JOHN ELBRRT.
DEALER IN

DEALER IN
Doors, Windows, Sewing Machines, Bicycl
Repairs, Tinware, Graniteware, Furni-
ture Made and Repaired, Picture
Frames Made to Order, Also
Undertaken and EmbaImer.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09

A beautiful display of misses
and ladies' skirts and waists at B.
N. Browns.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09

An elegant assortment of ladies'
shirt waists at B. N. Browns.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09
The Arcadia Creamery is now in

The Arcadia Creamery is now in
full operation, making ice, ice
cream and Elgin cream cry butter.
Send your orders to the creamery
and they will be promptly filed.
The creamery pays 26c per lb. for
your cream, or butter fat, that will
make a pound of butter, and one
cent pound for your milk that
tests A per cent. Mail orders So
licited for ice cream.
ARCADIA CREAMERY.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1907-05-09

Warranty deeds, deeds of trust,
chattel mortgages and quit claim
deeds for sale at this Office.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1907-04-28
FEAST Is ENJOYED BY
LODGE AND GUESTS.
Anniversary Occasion is
Celebrated Here.
SUMTER LODGE, ODD FtLLOWS
tlghty-Eighth Anniversary of Odd
FELLOWSHIP D is Celebrated manner
ICuS---IntereSting Program
And a Supper.
SUMTER LODGE, ODD FtLLOWS

(The eighty eighth anniversary of
odd Fellowship was celebrated on
Friday evening by Sumt er Lodge No.
264 of Americas, togetherIwith an as
semblage of friends, and the occasion
proved delightful one in every
respect.
Ihe lodge rooms were prettily decor
ated for the event and the program of
exercises was quite interesting, inter
spersed with musical selections.
Many ladies of VashtI' Lodge of
Rebekkahs were numbered among the
honored guests of the occasion and
kindly assisted their hosts in serving
the superb menu temptingly spread at
the conclusion of the exercises.
These were opened with prayer by
Mr. w. w. Lowery.
The address of welcome was delivered
by Noble Grand A. c. Kelly, who re-
viewed the work of ISumter Lodge and
spoke interestingly of odd Fellowship
and what it had accomplished.
y lengthy program of music and
was rendered, among those
taking part being Misses Mary Trimble
Margaret Morgan, Mrs. John Butt and
Mrs. 7. A. Coles. Following this an
elegant supper was served the guests.
band of music discOursed sweet
strains during the evening.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1907-04-28
TRUSTEES TO MEET IN
AMERICUSIN IN FEW DAYS
TO Select the College
Faculty
FINE PROGRESS ON BUILDINGS
Walls of New Structure are GOing
Up Rapidly NOw--.EIeCtiOn of
Teachers Will Be Import
ant One.
FINE PROGRESS ON BUILDINGS

The election of president and teach
ers for the Third District Agricultural
College will soon command the atten-
ton of the Board of Trustees. This
body will meet in Americus early in
May, probably about the 8th, for this
purpose, and there will doubtless be
an array of names from which selec4
ton will be made. In the meanwhile
rapid progress upon the college build
ings is being made. The contractors
have the requisite material at hand,
and there is no delay now upon that
score. The solid walls, both of the
main academic building and the boys
dormltory, are going up rapidly and
will be completed on contract time.
When the trustees meet here item days
hence definite action relative to the
proposed cornerstone exercises will be
taken and the program announced.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1907-04-28
SUPPORT OF CITY'S LIBRARY
A Splendid Institution Indeed and Worthy of Much
Better Support

Thackeray, Dickens. Scott and Elliot.
Generally speaking, though, the dust
would soon accumulate upon all but
the books of the hour were it not for
the vigorous welding of the brush.
The library is a quiet place, with the
atmosphere of refinement and culture
that always seems to permta.e a room
full of the books of all ages. Well
lighted, with comfortable chairs, no
more agreeable place can be found for
an hours leisure.
The leading illustrated papers and
magazines are all there, ready for the
public perusal. The free use of the
books can be had by those who are not
members but who may desire TO read
them within the library walls. There
is every .inducement to the public to
make at least an occasional use the
library, but for some reason or other
the public has singuIarly failed To res
pond to the opportunity as il should.
A club of twenty gentlemen con-
tributes fifty cents month each, this
fund being devoted entirely to the
purchase of current literature. Occa-
sionally book is donated, or small
cash contribution comes in to swell
the revenues. But with it all the total
funds are inadequate to maintain the
library properly.
The Association has the nucleus of
fine library. 1t owns its lot and build
ing, free from debt. An expenditure
Ofa hundred dollars i'll paperirg and
paint would wonderfully brighten the
interior, making it more cheerful and
attractive.
With double the present member
ship, and one hundred and twenty
members would be small numbe for
city with the pretentions of Americus
to wealth. intelligence and culture, the
income would be sufficient to maintain
the room in good condition, to develop
The library along reasonable lines, and
to vastly increase the possibilities of
its usefulness to the people.
There is nothing that should COM
mend itself more to the public attention
and consideration than the library
Its fees are nominal. One dollar for
three months reading means practically
a free library.
AS stated, the general public is always
welcome TO the use of the room and its
books and magazines without cost.
1t is really ii free reading room to
every man woman and child in Ameri-
Gus. 1t could be made a valuable ad-
junct to the public school system, as is
beng done elsewhere.
Why not support it more literally?
Why not put it where it can get oul
of the ruts and rise on stepping stones
of its dead self to higher things?
Why not become a member, if you
are not already one?
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1907-04-28
BANKS DEPOSITS ARE GROWING
President LOwrey Tells of Developing
of Savings Habit.

deposits in our savings bank are
growing very satisfactorily" said
Mr.. NJ. NJ. Lowrey, of the Americus
Trust and Savings Bank yesterday.
''The people of Americus, young and
old, are rapidly learning the value of
accumulating through the medium of
small savings. | believe that every
year will see handsome increase in
the deposits IN all OF our savings insti-
tutiOns, and that will be n decided
benefit to the community in several
ways. They will not only encourage
in the people the savings habit, but by
the accumulation of home funds they
will put our banks in a stronger
position financially and reflect credit
on Americus in the business world. 4
predict thriving development for all
of our savings banks from now on
The advertising that is being done is
bringing the matter of saving directly
before our people and ii must bear
fruit
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1907-04-28

One of The most useful institutions o.
Americas is the most poorly supported
and the least used by its citizens gen
orally.
The Library, eking out an existance
| in the old home where it has been To-
| Gated for many years past, is a reflec
tion on the public spirit Of the city, an
evidence of a lack Of desire for the
higher things of life that is not compli-
mentary to Americus and its people
In a citv of twelve thousand only
sixty are found who are sufficiently de-
sirOus to have the advantages of pub
lie library, either for themselves, OF
families, or the community generally
to be willing 10 pay one dollar every
three months toward the support OF
such a commendable institution.
With gross income of less than
$500 year, out Of which all expenses
are to be paid, ii must be apparent to
all that the scope of usefulness of the
library is very limited.
With such meogre funds it is inn
possible for it to do more than make
scattering purchases of current fiction,
absolutely impossible for it to even
pretend to keep itself abreast with the
times so far as publications in other de-
partments of literature are concerned
The great fields of travel, history,
poetry, science-these must all be
totally neglected.
That the library is maintained and
kept as useful to Americus as it is is due
librarian, Miss Myra Westbrook. Miss
WestbrOok' S work is largely one of
love. out of the petty funds at her
disposal quarterly she manages to keep
the library fairly equipped with the
popular books of the hour, the "best
sellers as they are best termed.
The Americus Library Association is
now in the thirheth year of its useful
existence. 1t was founded January l6,
1873. Its accumulations have reached
probably three thousand volumes, en-
bracing the usual standard works in
fiction, with fair collection of histO-
ries, biographies. and works of the
poets There is ample mental pabu-
lum in its home for those who are in
clined TO serious reading.
But, as elsewhere, the public does
not seem TO have its thoughts bent i'll
that direction. The experience of Ii
braries generally is that IS to so per
cent. of the calls are for fiction, and
that of those by far the greater part are
for fiction of the ephemeral type, the
fiction of the hour which has been wit
tily described as having as much body
and sonl as "a painted ship upon a
painted ocean,
There are occasional calls at the Ii
brary, though, for the older nOvelists,
for the most popular of the works Of
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1907-04-28
FUGITIVE KNOCKED AT KNOXVILLE
AmeTiCuS Prisoner HarpOOned Their
Yesterday.

Jim Bell is another of the feeing Q
Sumter county zebras to be captured
through Il fondness for letter writing.
Bell was among those who jumped the
chaingang near Americus several
months ago. He got as far as Knox
Vile Tenn, and then foolishly wrote a
letter home. This letter, like others
that have landed the writers back in
the chaingang, fell into the hands OF
the officers here and resulted yester-
day in Bells capture. He will go
back to the gang, and will then have
reason to wish he had never seen pen
or envelope.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1907-04-28
TO REMOVE THIS WEEK TOATLANTA
AmeriCuS Family to Make Home There
in Future.

1t is with feelings of genuine and
sincerest regret that the people of
Americus witness the departure of Mr..
and Mrs. Merrel Galloway for Atlanta,
where they go this week to reside per-
manently. TO say that these good
people are beloved by the entire com
munlty here would but feebly express
the real affection felt for both, and in
their departure every family circle in
Americus will feel as though bereft of
one of its own mem bers. They will
carry with them to their new home in
the capital city, where they will be
among friends and kindred equally
dear as those left behind, the sincerest
good wishes of every citizen of Ameri-
Gus, of whatever walk i'll life.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1907-04-28
ADVANCED PRICE OF COTTON TIES
Farmers Must Pay the Trust More
This Year.

Americus supply dealers who have
not as yet placed orders for cotton ties
for the next crop of the fleecy, will
have to pay the advance just imposed
by the Steel Trust. Prices were ad-
vanced 10 cents bundle. There were
:, 800, 900 bundles of cotton ties ready
for shipment to the South. Last year
the price per bundle was S5 cents.
The advance, which affects the entire
Southern cotton growing communities,
came as a surprise. 1t is estimated by
the steel corporation that the cotton
crop will be 20 per cent larger than
that of last year.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1907-04-28
JOKE TURNED UPON TILL HUNTERS
Who Attempted a Snipe Hunt at
Midnight.

4 1t was weary party of ''snipe hun
ters" that came back to the city yester-
day morning in the wee sma' hours,
with. their victim in tow. The hunt
was pulled off all right, and the victim
left in the woods holding the bag for
the expected "snipe" While the crowd
hurried back to the city. /As the victim
failed to materialize four hours later
the bunch relented and went to his
rescue only to find him peacefully
sleeping on the ''stand" where they
had placed hlm and wholly unaware
of the fact that he was the victim of the
joke. They will brand the next joke in
order that he may recognize it.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1907-04-28
Piles! Piles! Piles!

Williams Indian Pile Ointment will
cure Blind. Bleeding and itching Piles.
ing at once, acts as a pOultice, gives
instant relief Williams Indian Pile
Ointment is prepared for Piles and itch
ing of the private parts, Sold by drug
gists, mail soc and $1.00. Williams
Mfg. Co., Props. Cleveland, O.
Sold by w. A. Rembart.