davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

From the Baltimore New.

From the Baltimore News
George Delphas, a cotton grower, fell
in1o a weIl near Dallas. Tex. while re-
pairing the windmill, and found on the
bottom an iron box containing q Will
which was lost fifty years ago.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

II boys were permitted TO wait until
their tenth birthdays and then allowed
20 choose their own names, the mothers
of this land would be shocked to note the
prep0nderance of Bills" and Jacks"
over "Aisernons' and "ReginaEds. "
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02
The Lesser Evil.

'Of course, said the tragedian. ''in the
theatrical business a short run is bad"
But. interrupted the critic. good
long walk is worse isn't it?''
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02
"a the rienernI sfnre

Rough country this,"
Yes; and I have some ugly customers
at times"
They worry your wife, no doubt"
mot so much as the pretty ones. 1 sus-
pect."
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

Not content with raising rumpus in
Texas. Senator Bailey recently delivered
a speech that has set the Omaha Bee to
fighting the eivu war all over again!
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

The Congressional party saw only one
mosquito on the Isthmus Mr.. p. Bige-
lows attention is called to this further
vindication OF the President
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02
The Pnstor,r Wnr.

Yes, said the Rev. Mr.. Gasaway. "I
always strive to practice what preach. -
Yes replied Mr. Knox. but surely
you don't practice as long DO you?"
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02
MEN AND THINGS.
Thought Of Beltina.

Apropos of Senator Lodges recently
published statement that his first meeting
in politics with bis iliustrious friend Theo-
dore Roosevelt. was at the Republican
Natlonaf Convention Of 1881, an interesting
story involving them both is recalled. It
was In the period of what may be called
the partisan adolescence Of both. The
President was then twenty-six, the sena-
tor thirty-four Neither had had much ex-
perience in practical politics Both had
been profound students OF the game, how
ever. and had advanced sufficiently IN its
rudiments to be elected legateg-st-large
to the national convention Of their party.
Each was uneompromislngly opposed to
the ambition of james Gillespie Blaine.
and they fought his nomiaation to the
/ limit Of their resources. The Plumed
Knight won. and Messrs. Roosevelt and
Lodge Travelled together back to New
York. Both were sore distraught on
their arrival in New York they met the
late Col. w z. c. Breckenridge, then a
power in Democratic politics. To him
they intimated a growing determination
10 bolt the nomination Of Mr. Blaine and
support Mr.. Cleveland. It then being a
foregone conclusion that the Democrats
would nominate him. Kentueky's silver
tongued orator gave them some whole
some advice.
you are both young men with bril-
liant futures in politics" ne admonished
them. AT tj-e outset OF your careers
learn the lesson that every achievement
in great affairs Is the result OF com
promise. As a Democrat I would rejoice
10 welcome young men OF your characters
and attainments to the Democratic fold,
but If you are thinking only OF coming
to US because you are dissatisfied with
your nominee and not your party
know We could not hold you long. If
you bolt Blaine IL will be years before you
could reinstate yourselves in your party,
and even after that you will be under
suspicion that VIII handicap you. Take
my advice therefore, and don't bolt
Regularity is the thing that in the end
wins I'm politics"
Neither OF them bolted-but twelve
years later Col. Breckenridge bolted
Bryan.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02
Consolation Prize for mcoIea~v

From the Boston Herald.
Ex-Congressman Mecleary. of Mfnne-
sofa, has been sworn in as Second Assist
ant Postmaster G. neral He is a victim of
tariff reform sentiment in his late district
and a beneficiary of our consolation prize
system for defeated statesmen.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02
Correct.

why do they cali it Spring."
Because 1t springs on US 50 many va
rieties of weather, promptly answered
old man KnOwan
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

The landing Of a party OF American
marines at Honduras doesn't seem 20
have attracted any great attention. How
ever, everybody understands that we have
no use for a Honduran canal
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02
A self-avtdent Trnth.

From the Chicago Record Herald.
In challenging Taft. Foraker cannot be
accused Of picking on one who is smaller
than himself
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

A Pasadena millionaire has mart,ad his
cook. This help question is ASSUMING
alarming proportions
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02
A Question.

1T is refreshing 10 see a multi-millIon-
airs content TO marry a simple village
maiden
'Of the choruszT
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02
sr. CROWS One speech.

The venerable Galusha a. Grow whose
death occurred at his home In Pennsyl-
yania Sunday, returned 10 Congress in
1893 after an absence Of more than thirty
years. Under the unwritten rule Of the
House. the courtesy was extended to him
OF selecting his seat in any part OF the
chamber that best suited his fancy, he
having been Speaker Of the House IN the
tragic days of the civil war He chose a
desk situated about the middle of the
Republican side and at The end OF a row.
This he occupied through his two terms.
Toward the close Of each or these sessions
Mr.. Grow addressed the House at great
length, while the body was In Committee
Of the Whole House on the State of the
Union. on the tariff. The venerable states
mans voice was weak, and every mem
Der vied with every other member IN
keeping perfect order to the end that Mr.
Grow could be listened 10 with proper re-
spect. On each occasion he spoke by
unanimous consent for more than an hour,
and at the close was loudly applauded by
both sides of the House. Mr. Grow never
sought the privilege Of speaking on any
other question than the tariff. His death
leaves only two living ex-speakeTs, John
6. Carlisle and Gen. J. Warren Keifer,
the latter now a member Of the House.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

The male members of the musical COM
edy choTuses have organized a society
known as the Butt-Ins. The chorus ladies
ought TO organize the Stay-Puts.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

Holland which has no tarin OF any
sort, reports the most remarkably pros
porous year in a decade. The standpat-
ters, however. refuse to concede the ex-
istence Of any such place as Holland.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

The Easter bonnet sad TO say. is neces-
sarily laid away until the weather man
mean thing. finds out it's wrong to shoot
up sprlng.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02
HIS Hand on a Check.

'Tis true he scarce can write his name;
His hand Is not the scholars.
Unlike the scholars. too. the same
Is good for many dollars
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

The Right Rev. Innocent Puunski. Rus
sian Bishop Of Alaska, is in New York,
according TO a Gotham contemporary. He
must be some sort of relation to the old
reliable innocent bystander.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02
Iaaundered.

"AiI arrivals are Immediately washed.
explained the turnkey.
And If they resist?"
/ ''They are also ironed.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02
NOTHING SERIOUS.
Prom the Philadelphia Press.
WastefuI.


WastefuI.
You don't seem TO consider my opinions
very valuable" complained Mrs Chat
teTs.
My deir, replied her husband. " con-
slider them so valuable that IL shocks me
10 see ycu giving them cut so Dromiscu-
ously'
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

The Houston Post will take note of the
fact that up here Texas roasting ears are
known as 'nubbihs"
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

1t is the custom among certain Chinese
to bury their dead along with quantity
of money. Probably those who have
money 20 burn.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02
la Cosaic Opera.

What qualifications has he?''
why, the top Of his head is perfectly
fiat. Yeu could stand a glass Of water
on it,
'All right Wen star him"
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

Bob Fitzsimmons is suing a railroad
because it caused him 10 miss a matinee
engagement recently. And get some peo-
pie insist that railroads are enemies Of
the people,
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

It was rather impertinent. however. of
Central America to pull off a war not per-
sonally conducted by Mr.. Richard Hard
ing Davis
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

OF course, il may have been different in
Nspoleon's time, but many a iatteF-day
victory goes TO the side having the grcaser
number Of typewriters.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

Now it is declared that Wall street
latest panic was a sort of opera bouffe
affair, involving mostly stage money.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

BLOW at TAFT" says headline. Only
a blow. II viii not bulge him,
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02
Who Owns tae Money!

It's the old game Of button, button
who's got the button" that has been
played with $500 By the government at
Washington and Charles +. ". Neely for
nearly five years. Neeiy was the postal
official who was prosecuted for frauds IN
Cuba and sentenced 10 jail at Havana.
from which he was released under the am
nesty proclamation Of Cuba's first Presi-
dent Re was arrested on a New York
Central train near Rochester by posl-of-
flee inspectors, who found upon his person
s. 900 in cash. The inspectors turned the
money over to the post-ofice authorities
in Washington pending Neeiy's arrest and
prosecution. After Neely was convicted
at Havana the Postmaster General. hav-
ing no authority 10 dishGrse the money
or even TO hold il in trust, sent IL 10 the
Secretary Of the Treasury. That astute
Official perceived. after a season. that his
fidnciaTy function did not embrace ac-
cOuntability for cash that had not been
distinctly entrusted 10 him by the laws Of
the iSis.t, which make provision for the
conscience fund. bat none for money
taken from person accused Of lOOting
the revenues OF another government, as
was the case with Neely. Accordingly. be
sent the money back 10 the Postmaster
General with polite note properly wound
around with red tape. Back ard forth
the bundle Of s., 400 moved between the
Postofiiee Department and the Treasury
for d long time, accompanied by pleading
and apGlOgetic notes It is supposed
finally TO have been stored away some
where in the TTeasury's capacious vaults.
where to-day IL rests securely Ia the origi-
nal package. The luekless Neely drew a
draft on the Treasury a few days ago for
the money. but has been informed that
there is no credit 10 his account in that
department u is presumed that Nicely
viii continue his efforts to recover the
bundle. II is argued that If the Treasury
has no right TO disburse the money 1t has
no right to keep Il.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

There are many men In this country
who are willing TO PROSTATE themselves
and lick the blacking from a rich mans
shoes. just because he is rich" SAYS Mr..
John D. Rockefeller's pastor. And he
probably knows.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

Perhaps former Senator Burton hopes
to at least ALLEVIATE the ex-eonvict vote
from Mr.. Roosevelt's following.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

To admit Harry Thaws love letters in
evidence at the lupacy hearing would be
setting a highly dangerous precedent
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

The income Of the steel trust is said 20
be about s. per second. one would not
care TO own that thing for more than an
hour or so.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

They must be preparing to build a new
city hall out in that Illinois town where
the mayor offers to serve a term for 50
cents and the aldermen for 25 cents.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02
New Version.

This little pig TO market went
Without a howl.
And later 10 the trade was sent
As pOtted fowl.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

The Original Taft man is undoubtedly
grooming himself to appear in large clus-
ters before a great while.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

March certainly didn't go out like a
lady,
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

The game of billiards is becoming popu-
lar in Japan. japan cannot feel thor
oughly mOderniZed and civilized, however,
until the gentlemanIy individual with the
three shells and the pea comes along.
The Washington herald., 1907-04-02

Perhaps Mr. Bryan viii be mildly in
terested in learning that the White House
quarantine has been lifted
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1907-05-23


Is charming and amusing. Felicity makes
study of the heart life of an This tale of
midnight suppers tntrigues and cheap tragedy
The heroine is pure and lovely girl carefully instruct
ed wonderfully gifted Coming under influence CT
famous comedian spe ru upon the stage when out
child, then when too" ana ,prnding" to play childs
part she is placed in boarding school, later taking up
regular work and b. cunning star"
The book tells but little of her triumphs the stage
but deals with the development of the herself with
her life off the stage with her onness womanly bit
of hero worship in the bOssomng OF aectionate
nature into a love that is beautiful and noble
The reader ad mires the who tho thwared in her
youth is determined Felicity shall suffer as she has
bot does all her her chance happiness
For well written and pleasing story thar c'ptains
life yet is free from cOarSeneSs that sparkle
yet ashamed of IN reading of
Felicity: the Making Of Com denne
The above are published ny Charles S;rbuer's S,us
Chicago. = -
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1907-05-23

credible I would as soon ex-
pect a bullet from a rosebud. ~
Louisville Times.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1907-05-23

Harrisburg, Pa. May 10
The Pennsylvania legislature
of 1907 passed into history to-
day with the record of having
appropriated fifteen million
dollars for public schools, sew
en- million for good roads; six
million for pensions for Penn
sylvania soldiers OF the civil
war. tweuth-uine million for
public aud private charities
and various other purposes aud
having filled nearly all the
pledges OF the great political
parties in the last years cam
paign.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1907-05-23

"a Paris woman who had an
especially prepossessing hired
girl, became suspicious of the
.glances cast by the girl at her
husband, says the, Palco Enter.
prise. To test the matter. one
evening just at dark she threw
the girls wraps around her
bead and shoulders aud stepped
out of the back door just as she
thought her husband was com
ing IN. She was greeted with
a hearty hug and violently kiss
ed. Throwing the covering from
her shoulders she confronted
the hired man."
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1907-05-23

News papers with nothing to
do but boom politicians are be.
coming distressingly numerous.
The country needs papers that
will publish the news in Its full.
ness. work for the interest of
their respective communities
and seek to advance the couu-
try at large. Politicians don't
need TO be made-they will grow
up like jamestown weeds long
before there Is a demand for
them; but the news must be
published and the general wei.
fare OF the country advanced in
every manner possible.-News-
boy.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1907-05-23
CATARRH CAN
BE CURED.
XIII the Germs by Breathing lily O-mei
Gives Quick Relief

' 49, ~s"sS " HSo'huB ny U-Htct'
Gives Quick Relief
Many people who have suffer.
ed with catarrh for years uatur-
ally think they cannot be cured
and become discouraged.
The reason they have failed
of cure is because they have not
treated the disease with the
local remedy, Hy-o-meI, which
is breathed through a neat
pocket inhaler so that it's heal.
ing indicated air reaches the
most remote air cells, killed all
catarTh germs and restores the
mucous mem rane of the nose,
throat and lungs to a healthy
condition.
Catarrh is really a local dis
ease and to cure it, it must be
treated by a remedy which
reaches every spot in the nose
and throat where the disease
germs lodge. Hy-o-mei does
this and gives relief from the
first days use.
A complete. Hy.o-mei outfit
costs but $l.00 and l.. M. Wood
give a guarantee with every
package to refund the money
unless it cures.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1907-05-23

The minister bad jusr diued
with the Brown family. AS
they left the dining room, the
guest turned to his hostess.
saying: Sister Brown. I rare
lvget such dne dinner" Brown,
jr' an oStspoksnI q lad Of 10,
quickly Responded, "Neither
do We. Brother Dash, Mobile
Register
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1907-05-23
Mrs. Phelps Stokes .EUigram

A charming epigram adorned
an address that Mrs. j. G..
Phelps Stokes made ON her last
visit 10 Detroit.
The brilliant young lady was
rejoicing over the fact that in
the slums woman no matter
how wretched her case, kept
her speech pvre, as a rue, of
profanity,
IAN oath from woman's lips.
she ended. us unnatural and in.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1907-05-23
Hot Race.

James Elliott. the livery man
can put up a hot race when nee
essary. Friday morning be
started for the JoeS depot with
a heavy grip in his hand. and
ne saw a train approaching and
thinking it the passenger threw
the throttle wide open and beat
the train to the depot. but dog
gone 1t. it was a freight and he
had ten minutes to spare. The
next time he will look to see
whether he is chaseing his nose
for a freight or passenger train.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1907-05-23
ian Go Without Drinking.

From our childhood picture
book days nearly every one Of
US have cherished the idea that
the camel was the beasts above
all others that cou d exist for
extended periods without drink-
ing. And so few of us have any
idea that there are other beasts
of the earth quite as capable as
the bumped quadruped of going
tor days ana weeks without
water.
Sheep in the northwestern
deserts go from forty to sixty
days, IN winter, without drink.
grazing on the green, succulent
vegetation of that season.
Peccaries lin the desert of
Sonora live in little dry hills,
where there is no natural water.
for longeperiods. They cannot
possibly find water, in tact. for
months at a time. The only
moisture they Can obtain comes
from roots and the fruits of
cacti
But the most extra ordinary
case is that of the pocket mouse.
one of theVcommon rodents of
the desert. | SThis little creature,
by the way, has genuine, fur
lined pocket on the outside of
its cheek. When it is bung-y
takes food from this pocket
with its lpaw, just as a man
would pull a sandwich from
his pocket.
1t is said that one of these
mice has !been kept for three
years swith no other food than
the mixed bird seed OF commerce
During this period it had not a
taste of either water or green
food. OIher experiment in this
directions have shown, in fact.
that these mice in capacity re
fuse such treats. not seeming 10
know that water is good 70
drink. The bird seed put before
the mouse referred to contained
not more than 10 per cent of
moister, which Is less than is
necessary fort digestion Stuff
so dry as this cannot even be
swallowed uctil it is moistened
by saliva, Ilyet this remarkable
mouse gave nothing but his time
to the interests of science. He
suffered nothing in health or
spirits during his captivity
New York Herald.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1907-05-23

A man in Cass county has for
some time been troubled with
pimples on his nose, and con.
cluded it was time to do some
thing for it," So be looked
around in the pantry and found
a bottle of Imminent which he
applied twice day for several
weeks. Tn the meantime his
nose got no better rapidly, but
instead began to assume gigan-
tic proportions. At last he
consulted his wife about the
m alter. She asked him what
be had been doing for it, and he
told her he had been using that
liniment in the pantry. What
linimentG" So he got the bot =
tie aud showed it to her. well
of the old fools you do beat all
Screamed the wife. THAT amt
Imminent; that's bottle of bust
developer that Mary Ann sent
to st. Louis for"
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1907-05-23

Governor Folks idea of hon c
rule seems,to be that those de.
ing home rule should be satlsa.
ed to be ruled from Governor
Folks home. --Brookfield Ga.
zslte.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1907-05-23

If the Kansas City Star can
move as much dirt down on the
Isthmus as it has thrown at the
Democrats of Missouri, IL ought
to be given the contract to CON
pIete the Panama canal Nor
borne Democrat.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1907-05-23
BY F.. Hopkinson Smith.

EopkinsoH Smith,
The author has in book form collection OF seve raj
stories which nLnel I've Vele tidy, which is
the title OF the first III hard to please
if they did fin rnio. 1T 20 tner liking.
Here finds the charming and iOvable Houri.
beautiful V,netian love affairs upset Quarter
mOtherIy whose hi arr warmed toward
her compnnIor adj 'nDng berth, p'ucky New Eng
land girl with u her ictiuns prm
whose only consolation the hoitdrr who sat OPP
posite, stories SKINNY suulred Eyceences with
taste for revolutions we'll gror ned club swels and gay
Bobemians
The general humur. tender romance. picturesque at
mosphere and the vital characters OF these tales
appeal to and women of all ages.
Mr.. Smiths knowledge of character, and variety of
experience is evident.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1907-05-23
Smiths Sure Kidney Cure.

The only guaranteed kidney rem
edy. Buy it-try tit costs you
nothing If it fails. Price so cents
L. J. Yates.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1907-05-23

Do You Suffer From Kidney TrOubIes1
We guarantee one bottle of Smith
Sure Kidney Cure to benefit or cure,
or your druggist will refund your
money. Price SO cents.-L. ]. Yates.
The daily sentinel., 1907-03-23
THE WATCH
HOUSE
NE GLEE CLUBS ARE HERE.


|ssre has been a heavy sale of
for the concert to be given this
Islpg at the Congregational church
|ihe glee and madolin clubs of the
SOrado University.
|tls morning the young gentle
about thirty in number reached
| dty on No. 3 and are stopping at
various hotels. Many of them
Il friends among the young peo-
| Of this city and are making pleas
|kut brief visits with them.
[hs Colorado University Glee club
e of the strongest organizations
rs kind in the west and a splen-
entertainment is promised all
attend this evening. Each year
many years the university has
! out q glee club for a tour of the
e embracing about three weeks
{, and it is declared that this
the organization is stronger
, ever before.
Pie young men deserve a large
ienee and will have one. The
sfiainment is under the auspices
be Young Mems club of the Con
Eztional church.
The daily sentinel., 1907-03-23
METHODIST CHURCH

The pastors subject for Sunday
morning will be "Individualism." In
the evening "Christ's kingdom"
The Easter music is coming along
nicely. Program next week.
Sunday morning Mrs. Julia Bross-
Pinnell will use THE Palms by
Faure and when the AIists Have
Cleared Away" by Hensharr in the
evening. There will also be selec
ton by the choir.
The Masons will worship at oui
church on Sunday evening. March 81
Easter Sunday should be a day oi
great blessing.
The daily sentinel., 1907-03-23
No. 3. DON'T COMPLAIN.

If your chest pains and you are un'
able to sleep because of a cough
Buy a bottle of Ballard's horehound
Syrup and you won't have any cough
Get a bottle now and that cough will
not last long. A cure for all pull
monary diseases. Mrs. j. Calves
ton, Texas, writes: 81 can't say
enough for Ballard's Horehound
Syrup. The relief it has given me is
all that is necessary for me to say >
For sale by C. d. Smith & Co.
The daily sentinel., 1907-03-23
How to Remain Young.

To continue young in health and
strength, do as Mrs. N. f. Rowan, Nc
Donough. Ga, did. She says: Three
bottles of Electric Bitters cured me of
chronic liver and stomach trouble.
complicated with such an unhealthy
condition of the blood that my skin
turned red as flannel am now prac
tically 20 years younger than before
took Electric Bitters. / can now do
all my work with ease and assist in
my husbands store" Guaranteed at
C. D. Smith & Co.'S Drug Store.
Price soc.