davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04
Humorous Items =:

Young Wife ito cookl-We cannot eat
n mouthful of the dinner; you have
spoiled everything | can do that myself.
FIiegende BlaCtter.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04
Practical.

Anna. you wished to buy a diction-
ary?'
II have married a professor instead"
-Mcggendorfer Blaetter.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04
Valid Plea.

Judge Prisoner, have you anything to
say to the court before sentence is pro
nOuncedI
Prisoner beg the court to consider
the youth of my attorney.-Bl anco Ne
.rn.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04
He Vas SUCH a Nice Nan.

"Your wife feminds me Of my Hrsi
wife"
she reminds me Of her FIRST hus-
band. Houston Post.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04
Forethought.

She wished to break it to him gently.
Il have decided" she said, Ito return
your ring"
You needn't bother" he replied: 81
buy them by the dozen. Pick Me-Up.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04
Proof Positive.

When little John was nearly seven
He went. by gasoline. to heaven.
His mother knows hc&gOne mp higher
Becausc burned chlld breads the fire.
Cecilia A. LoZeauX In Lippinc0tt's.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04
Between Two Gentlemen.

Il was talking-tU your wife today2"
".Ah, indeed How did that happenY'
How did it happen? How did what
happen"
That yoth were talking. gu Motto
per Ridere.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1907-05-04
Evidence.

The evidence shows, Mrs. Mulcahey,
that you threw a stone at the constable
1T shows more than that, yer honor.
1t shows that Oi hit him. Judge.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17
Post Office a Rusv Place.

The busiest place in town this week
is Uncle Sam store-the post office.
According to a law passed during the
session of the last Congress all mail
matter must be divided and counted
and the work at the post Office in this
place was started at midnight Sunday
and will be continued throughout the
entire week.
There are four general divisions of
the mail divided into four classes,
first, second, third and fourth class.
The second class is sub-divided into
four parts and the first class is sub
divided into three parts, as follows /:
Postal cards, letters and first class
packages.
The employees at the post office are
required to ascertain the amount of
the different divisions Of the mail aud
the amount of postage Of each class.
This is kept separate and the total
sum learned each day.
In addition to this work the weigh
ing of the mail is beiug continued
Two and one-half tons of mail is sent
out from the Danville office each
month, this being the average for the
month of July, August and Septem-
ber.
All persons to insure the prompt
sending of their mail should deposit
it as quickly as possible before the
time they desire it to be sent on ac-
count of this volume of extra work
now being performed at the post office
1t is believed this extra work is be-
ing done so that the government will
have some data concerning the pay ing
for the transportation of the mail by
the railroad companies.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17
Montour American.
FRANK C. ANGLE, Proprietor.
Danviile, Pa, Oct. IL, 1907.
The Law and the Citizen.

In this country we have surplus
age of laws Congress and the State
legislatures aud the local councils, are
eyerlastingly At it adding to the vol
ume of legislation. But the intellig-
ent alien isn't here very long until he
discovers that many laws are absolute
ly yaIueless for the reason that no
effort is made to euofrce them. After
awhile he begius 20 initiate the ex-
ample of his native neighbor-when
he finds law restraining his fancy
he is tempted to ingore it.
Take the liquor laws of the several
States. Not one of them is perfectly
enforced. Much opposition is made to
the enactment of prohibitory laws on
the ground that they will be disre-
garded. And yet the truth is that they
are quite as generally obeyed as are
other laws dealing with the liquor
problem We have law in this State
which forbids the sale without IL
cense which forbids the sale on Sun
day; which forbids the sale to con-
firmed drunkard or to one visibly un-
der the influence of liquor. Wise re-
strictions, these, but how seldom are
they regarded.
We also have an act of assembly i'm
posing tax on dogs. Recently it was
supplemented by another act provid-
ottaphaH
to it's collar tag certifying that its
master had paid the tax for the cur
rent year it became the duty of the
constable of the ward or township IN
which such dog might be found run
ming at large to put it out existence.
How much of an effort is anywhere
being made to enforce that act? And
vet it seems to be wise and judicl-
ous measure, we'll calculated to reduce
the surplus population of worthless
CANNES and to bring in considerable
revenue from those willing and anX-
ious to pay rather tiian lose their dogs.
1t is bad example, we native born
Americans place before our brother
from abroad who comes here expect
ing to be good American and apx-
ious to initiate our example. We
trample under foot the Sunday laws
and others that do not meet with our
approval and then wonder why some
of our new citizens manifest such an
inveterate disposition to take the law
into their own hands also The truth
is they are not here long until they
discover that the only law many of us
care to obey or to have enforced is one
which protects our personal interest,".
while those that displease us are dis
obeyed.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17
Concerning Swindlers.

Mrs. Cassie Chadwick, who died tr
prison at Columbus. was the moi r'-
markable swindler of the age Sh@ is
reported to have swindled usually cool
and alert business men out of more
than a million dollars. Whether or
not her Imprisonment shortened her
life is a matter of little moment, for
she accepted all chances. The impair
ment Of health by reason of cOnfine-
ment in the penitentiary is possibil-
ity we'll understood by lawbreakers
but which never deters them from the
commission of crime. Mrs. Chadwick
was no exception to the rule.
There has been some touching SER
monizing on the crimes and the death
of this woman, and indeed they fur
nish many topic for discussion ev
erywhere. She received the wages of
sin and paid the debt of nature while
paying the penalty eXacted by the law.
She is no longer the debtor of man or
law. Discussions and sermons based
on her career will apply with greater
force to the living than TO the dead.
There are many Chadwicks, of both
sexes, whose heads stand high in the
community because they have not
broken the eleventh commandment.
There are swindlers in high stations,
eminent in politics and business. who
are fine fellows because they have new
er been brought to trial for their
swindles. The railroad prince who
defrauds the stockholders of millions
by means of dishonest manipulation of
their holdings or the stock is swind-
Ter of worse degree than Mrs. Chad
wick but he is not punished. The
corporation that destroys rivals vio-
ates the laws and defrauds customers
of just return for their money is a
swindler, and its officers ought to be
in the penitentiary.
The greatest swindlers are those who
defy the law and who are protected
against prosecutions and penalties.
There are many who enjoy that pro-
lection. 1t is to be hope that Cassie
Chadwick's fate will be warning
and a lesson to all who love the
mighty dollar better than they love
morality, conscience, the statutes and
honorable treatment of their fellow
men.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17
DIST. ATTORNEY
SCORES GAMBLING

District Attorney @. A. Small in an
open letter censures the officials of the
Columbia county fair association for
granting privileges under which gam
bling was carried ON last week on the
fair grounds. In walk down the mid
way, he says, he found that privileges
had been granted for fortune telling,
the gingle board, the gaming table,
the pickup game, the fortune wheel,
the lottery, and number of others.
He closed during the four days OF the
fair eleven gambling games and three
fortune tellers. Mr.. Small also claims
that speak-easy was conducted un-
der the grand stand at the race track.
where whiskey was sold at ten cents n
drink. The method used was as fol-
lows: The parties in charge would
brush the coat and hat of the thirsty
patron. For this work charge of ten
cents was made and drink of whisky
given to those who desired it. He con-
cludes by hoping that during the next
fair these wrongs will not be permit
ted, and pledges the people of the
county that the guilty parties will be
prosecuted.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17
AMBULANCE CHASERS
ABOUT HERE, TOO

The Milton Standard of last evening
contained the following:
The Pennsylvania railroad is just
discovering that the ambulance chas-
er" methods, so much in vogue at
Philadelphia, are equally popular along
the Sunbury division. In the city,
whenever an ambulance goes by some
one generally follows it, finds out who
is hurt, and. if the victim was struck
by a trolley car, persuades him to
bring suit against the corporation for
damages. This method of procedure is
especially popular among lawyers of
certain class. AS the injured man
never fails to get Judgment in his fav-
or, the lawyer himself gets a rich haul
in the costs and his share of the dam
ages. Along the Sunbury division, in
Columbia county, forest land frequent
ly catches fire by sparks from the eng
iues. 1t is said that whenever smoke
arises on the lower side of the North
Branch one or more Bloomsbury law
yers walk over the bridge to investi-
gate the fire and to persuade the own
Ell to bring suit against the company.
With continued success this practice
is becoming quite popular, as the dam
age cases now listed for trial in the
Columbia county courts will attest.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17
Enough Turkeys for Everybody.

"There will be enough turkey to 60
around.
So said big produce and poultry
farmer to a Morning News reporter
when quizzed about the alleged scare
ity of the delectale gobbler.
"You can say too, that there is more
poultry generally this year than in
several years, he added.
The reports from down around Phil
adelphia intimate that so many of the
young turkeys got their feet wet in
the spring and died that Thanksgiving
will see scarcity and high price. 1t
is even predicted that they will be q
fourth less in number than last year.
Several causes for this decrease of
the great American bird are given by
farmers and poultry raisers The rainy
season came this year when the tur
keys were at a tender period of thsir
growth.
Western firms handling turkeys will
be cautious in disposing of their stock
this year. If local raisers keep the
market tight at Thanksgiving, Chi
cago will probably send in heavy ship
ments at the last minute. 49,.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17
Threaten to Use Coal Oil.


The two electric light companies Of
Bloomsbury have joined in raising
prices, which comes as sort of jar
to Bloomsbury people, who for sever
al years past have been congratulating
them selves on very low rates The fol-
lowing clipping from the Blooms
burg Daily" of Tuesday evening relat-
ing to the advance wi II be read with in
terest, as it gives Danville users of
electric light an opportunity of COM
pairing rates. The DAILY" says:
Gan increased rate of approximate
" 80 per cent on the old rate for light
to the small consumers was made by
the Irondale Electric Light. Heat and
Power Co. ,on Tuesday afternoon when
it gave notice that on and after the
first day of November next the rate for
light from nothing up to 20 kilowatts,
Ga method of measuring the electric
fluid used) would cost 90 instead of &c
as the present charge is, and with a
minimum meter rate charge of 75c per
month. The same kind of notice was
handed to the consumers of the Ameri-
can Electric Light Co., several days
ago. Each company will make fur
ther charge of 15c per light for globes
exchanged. Heretofore the charge was
nothing for exchange of globes.
"The increased cost came as sort
of a holiday present to the small con-
sumer of light, who was enjoying the
use Of real electric lights in his home
at a. lower cost, and was received with
regret, as the cost of almost everything
else has been increased.
"There was a general feeling of sor-
row from users of the Irondale Elec-
trio Light, and it is said that more
han one has decided to cut it out and
go back to coal oil, as they say they
cannot afford to pay the increase of
lighting costs. d"
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17
TOMORROW IS
AUTUMN ARBOR DAY

Tomorrow. October IS, has been fix
ed as the autumn Arbor Day in Penn
sylvania. Increased observance OF tbs
spirit of this occasion will go long
way toward making our State pleas
anter as well as a more profitable
place in which to live.
Those who can't plant tree can al
least resolve to refrain from needless.
ly destroying or iujuring one.
1t is not a mere question of aesthe.
tics. There is a practical side 10 the
subject of forestration. 1t is a we'll
known fact that trees constitute great
natural storage reservoirs and that the
destruction of forests causes excessive
floods aud low water periods, So that
streams do not flow as regularly as be-
fore. In other words, when heavy rains
fall on large denuded areas the alb
sence Of trees releases inmediatel
large volumes of water that would
storage reservoirs to run off slowly
during the later periods of drought,
thus avoiding floods at one time and
dry bed at another.
The State Water Supply Commis-
sion recently reported that the steady
flow of the rivers and smaller streams
on which the people of Pennsylvania
depend for their water supply as we'll
as for commercial and sanitary uses,
has been ga 1atly interfered with by
the reduction of the forest areas. The
necessity for some remedial steps has
long been apparent to trained observ~
ers aud the Legislature for several
sessions past have been making sub
stantial additions to the appropriation
for the purchase and care of State for
estry reserves.
But while much can be done by the
very capable officers of the Forestry
Departments the citizens generally can
do much more, if they only will.
There were 6.00O,O 900 persons in
Pennsylvania at the time of the last
census. in 1900. If one-half, or one
third, or one-fourth of these would
plant one tree each year, in what a
short time would every available grow
ing place be filed. The gain in dol
lars and cents, to say nothing of the
enhanced attractiveness of our great
Commonwealth, that would inevitably
follow such general response to the
increasing necessity for reforestration
in this State, would be beyond COM
putation.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17
REAL ESTATE sold
AT PUBLIC Sale

Several.properties belonging to the
estate of Hon. W. K. Holloway, de-
ceased. we're exposed at public sale
Tuesday forenoon. The result will be
followed with good deal of interest
as revealing the value of real estate
and the willingness of people to invest
in that kind of property.
There were five properties in all,
situated in different parts of the bor-
ough. The sale in each instance was
held on the premises, Michael Brock
bill acting as auctioneer.
The three town lots situated on the
south side of West Mahoning street
adjoining the property Of John H.
Gernert and of 80 and 81 feet 'front.'
age, respectively, were sold as one
tract, which was knocked down to Mrs
Frick for $3.50.
Three lots at West Market and Arch
streets were also sold together. com
posing tract with frontage of 81
feet and 1873 feet deep. William v.
Oglesby, Esq, was the purchaser. the
price paid being $125. The tract in
part has been occupied as a tennis
court, purpose to which it will be
applied in the future.
A town lot with a frontage of 3814
feet and 230 feet deep, situated on
West Market street between the prop
critics of Harrison Shut and Mrs
Sara @. Hale, was purchased by Miss
Mary Holloway. The price paid was
$S5.
The lot with two story frame dwell
ing fronting on West Market street
between the properties of Henry Kav-
anaugh and Mrs. Sara c. Hale was
knocked down to Mrs. Jacob Stuart
for $3.50.
The lot with two story brick dwell
ing onELittle Ash street adjoining the
property of John Tovey was knocked
down to Mrs. James Coleman for s755
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17
IMPOSING new
STRUCTURES

Joseph g. Lynch of the firm of
Lynch Bros, contractors for the new
buildings at the hospital for the in
sane, returned to this city Mondayeven-
ing and as speedily as possible will
get the work of building under way.
Mr.. Lynch was in this city during
the greater part of last week perfect
ing arrangements. The impression got
abroad that work would begin at the
hospital yesterday and during the
morning hours persons looking for
work could be seen on the grounds. 1t
may be several days before the con-
tractors can get material, teams and
men together. but Mr.. Jynch is emph-
attic in the assertion that operations
will begin this week.
Judging from the site selected for
each of the three new buildings, the
latter when completed will give the
hospital altogether different appear
ance. The building for the acute in
sane male patients will be built on a
line with and at the extreme end OF
the imposing west wing of the main
building, while the building for the
acute insane female patients will oc-
cupy site at the eastern end of the
femaleywing. Each of the new struct-
ures, which will be separated from the
main building by n plot of ground,
will be of large dimensions and of i'm
posing architecture, comporting in
every respect'with the general plan
and design.
The female infirmary will occupy a
site south'of the new building for the
acute female patients, some fifty yards
distant, and about midway between
the latter building and the nurses
home. The excavation for the female
infirmary is completed, which conveys
good idea of the ground plan and
the dimensions,ofsthe building. 1t is
large in size and in the main con-
forms with the male infirmary.
The latter, for which $25, 900 is ap'
propriated. will be raised and extend
ed. When all the buildings are COM
pleted the male infirmary, raised and
enlarged, will stand south of the build
ing for acute insane male patients,
sustaining the same relation to that
wing that the female infirmary does
to the eastern wing.
With slight effort the reader car
produce mental picture of the inn
posing group of buildings that will
occupy the hospital grounds when the
handsome appropriation is expended.
The group will finally include a suit
able building for employees and attend
ants, for which the sum of fiftee1
thousand dollars is appropriated.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17
Looking to the Presidency.

Under existing conditions in Penn.
sylvania, the success of the Rcpubli-
can ticket is inevitable.
Every effort on the part of the op-
position to divide the Republican vote
has been failure. Independents who
have recently been figuring in fusion
movements are practically all lined
up for the Republican candidate. They
see that this is but the beginning of a
great national fight in which the Re
publican hosts will be lined up against
the national Democracy in a struggle
for the presidency They want to have
their party united now, so that
Republicanism will not be handi-
capped next year when it shall be
called upon to elect a successor to
President Roosevelt. They want to let
the nation know by the size of the Re-
publican majority in Pennsylvania this
fall that the Keystone state is again
at the front, prepared to battle for the
principles and the policies which have
made this the greatest nation upon
the globe.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17

ONLY A LITTLE COLD in the
head may be the beginning of an OBJ
stinate case of Nasal Catarrh. Drive
out the invader with Ely's Cream
Balm applied straight to the infiamed
stuffed up air-passages. Price SOC.
If you prefer to use an atomizer. ask
for Liquid Cream Balm. 1t has all the
good qualities of the solid form Of
this remedy and will rid you of cat
arrh or hay fever. No cocaine to breed
dreadful habit. No mercury to drop
out the secretion. Price 75c. with
spraying tube. All druggists, or mail.
ed by Ely Bros. 56 Warren Street,
N Y
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17
Helped q sick Family.

The condition of the family of Geo.
w. Miller, near PaxiQos, all of whom
were down with typhoid fever. has
been noticed il our columns They are
still in feeble condition and on Mon
day many friends and neighbors gath
cred at the Miller farm and cut and
put away the corn from fourteen acres.
The large throng of jolly men and
boys worked with will and succeed
ed in getting the crop under roof.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17
A Big Cabbage.

Cabbage evidently viii be a good
crop this year if fine specimen rails
ed by James Heckendorn. Mahoning
township is criterion. The head,
with stalk attached, was on exhibi-
tion in the window of W. H. N. Walk
ers hotel in the second ward yester-
day. The weight of the head and stalk
was twentyfive pounds.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17

All the members of the family of
George E. Campbell, of Lancaster, be-
came very ill on Monday after eating
sauer kraut for dinner and the physi-
clan who was summoned said they
were suffering from arsenical poison
ing. The supposition is that Paris
green had been used on the cabbage to
destroy the cabbage worm and the
outer leaves had not been properly re-
moved when the kraut was made.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17
Spoke at Prayer rleeting.

Rev. J. J. Shindel, of Allentown, a
nephew of the late Rev. NJ. L. Shindel.
has been spending several days in Dan
vile as a guest..at .the home of MIR.
and Mrs. S. A. Mccoy. Church street.
Last evening Rev. Shindel spoke at
the prayer meeting at Pine Street
Evangelical Lutheran church.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17
~
Sour
Stomach

No appetite, loss Of strength. HegvS4..
,..ss. hsada dachs. constipation, sas ereRs-
E-norsi debility. sour risingS, and Ssta;f
ID tAs stomach are all due ~ insieestsa'1
z 5sl relieves lnaig ssiian. Thls esv 9lsas'-
.5grcAan,s ihs natural juices 81 aSy a-
-. as they osl3, in q healthy sisRssa
g,V."sd Nish che greatest EAsvE ts.,s
.-1 r.1oGsruoi!Ve eropsTtlse. KsdSi 90
j., frspfia does not eaiy tslisvs indisssS -
aHa Iy.pssslG. sw THE ismsss TeHss
aoips all stomach troubles ~ sisAks9ef
certifying. swsstshIag and strsEEts@psisg
de mucous membranes lining The siSsnes2>
-, : s. RsN n ssvsavwseI ", w.. sass1v
- s.ub,sd eta 0euf atosnAEh ~ .Sepa ssSN
Nrs,' ,gss M ard zeiaz b sls''
fef -ss5
ktSe. DiEssss Whsi T'o~ B@a.
ss-s.sa s.Y ksEsvss iaaisesIs~. seSs<zs.
bsskins ~ zee sNA
H-spAe~a ~ q. o. oSWiTT o6>. 2<sNSA-ssA
For Sale by Pa1les d Co.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17
Bi-County Convention of {. E.

The convention of the bi-county
union of Christian Endeavor. of Mon
tour au6 Columbia counties, will be
held at Espy this evening and all day
Friday, Persons leaving on the 8 80
p. NJ, trolley will reach Espy.in time
for the first session.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17
Funeral TODAY.

John, the eight. t.month old infant of
Mr.. and Mrs. Harry Delhanty, Grand
street, departed this life on Tuesday
The funeral will take place at
O'Clock this afternoon, Interment will
be made in Odd Fellows cemetery.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17

The action of the Republican state
administration in pressing the prose-
cutions against men accused of de-
frauding the state in connection with
the building and furnishing of the
state capitol at Harrisburg has en-
tirely eliminated that issue from the
present political campaign.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1907-10-17

A popular instrument in Madagas-
car is the bamboo guitar, made from
a bamboo cane six feet long. The
cavity serves as the sounding board.