The gold leaf. [volume] (Henderson, N.C.) 1881-1911, 1907-01-31
Foolish Customs that Ought to be
Abolished.
Monroe journal.

Monroe journal.
Wa all feel grateful for the kind
words and deeds OF those who re-
member us in the time OF distress
and i'm the hour of affection. But
why should we want to express so
obvious q fact through the news
papers? When we have gotten over
the wounds or have seen light
through the trouble and are not
able thank in person those who have
helped bear our burdens, 1t Is
mighty poor way OF expressing
appreciation to send word to the
paper to write you up something
good and nice. Some time in the
unforgotten past the people OF tins
town and country got into the habit
Ofpublishing "cards of thanks. The
custom mas held on like grim death till
many people seem to think that folks
are not buried with due hOnOrs unless
the card OF thanks appears. 1t Is
done, too. in most cases, not from
any real desire to express a feeling
OF gratitude, but because it is the
custom. Such cards might once
have been real expressions OF graft
itude, but if so, they have ceased to
be, and are only Il habit. Let's
throw it Off
And the wearing of Grape. Once
there was boy who noted that
some families seemed to wear Grape
nil the time, and it appeared to be Il
most solemn and sacred rite. But 1t
almost seemed to be q luxury that
everybody in the neighborhood
didn't enjOy--it seemed kind Ofpride,
n distinction. There was more notice.
greater awe, when one of the wearers
of the Grape came into the little
church and took seat in full view
and amid the close scrutiny of The.
congregation. To the boy there was
sense of regret that his folks could
not shine like the others Somehow
nobody would die. TO the boy
grown there is but one person in the
world to whom the badges ofmourn-
ing are becOming-thew widow. About
her form they become sacred, appro-
and longer the years they are worn
the more becoming do they appear
Did you ever feel n shock when
seeing for the first time the appear
ancein gay trappings OF one who had
worn the black things for a stipu-
lated period-iust long enough to
have cOnformed to the custom, every
movement showing that they were
laid aside with Joy? The feeling that
it had all been for mere show, for the
advertising purposes, to merely con-
form to the conventional, must have
been Illuminating to you. even a
stranger. Wasn't it?
The wearing of Grape hat bands by
men after they had lost some relative
was once the almost universal Gus
tom, but has now nearly pissed out
of fashion. Isn't it wonderful that
people will stand in the presence Of
death, and death of loved ones at
that, and seek to find what fashion
dictates? Oh, how we bear our necks
to the tyrant OF what folks think
the conventional. the proper thing!
The awful solemnity of death cannot
stay the ever present question. A
strong man who has a real grief
should never-we had almost said
will never-parade it before the world;
it is his to bear in silence, helped
by the sympathy of those who know
and love. Why should he want to
excite the curious by putting Grape
on his hat? And if he has no real
grief he should not conform to a
hollow custom. Men should cease
to wear Grape.