The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1907-05-27
THE FARMER IND THE AUTO.

During this session of the Illinois leg
islature the members from the rural
district have worked overtime prepar-
ing and introducing bills for the sup
preston of the automobile or the re-
striction OF its speed on country high
ways. Bills for signals, for a maximum
speed OF five miles an hour, for punt
tive damages IN accidents caused by
machines frightening teams, for the ex-
animation of chauffeurs and providing
regulations enough to control a steam
ship line followed one after the other.
Nobody knew how TO head off the food
of threatened legislation without Of
Tending the rural contingent, until one
John r. Robinson of Farmer City rose
TO the emergency.
Robinson didn't waste a minute in
argument; he didn't even visit the au-
thors of the bills. Instead, he framed
up a few amendments OF his own and
introduced them. thus:
Section 1. In case a farmers horse will
not pass @ machine, the autOist will take
his car apart and conceal the parts in the
grass.
Sec. 2 All autOists will wear DISCUSSES,
ladies will 20 yelled, and numbers will
be placed upon machines upside down.
Sec. 3. In approaching curves, aatoists
will take the horn and go ahead on foot,
sounding It one minute and listening the
next.
Sec. l. In case Of being called names,
the autoist Will pay no attention unless he
is called ''moliycoddle," IN which case
he shall pay his fine for assault.
Sec. 5. Speed on country roads win be
limited 20 ten miles an hour until the
tosrfst sees a oaiiiff who does not appear
to have had 6 drink In thirty days, when
the motortst shall be permitted 20 make
ell the speed he can.
Sec. G. In case of a breakdown, the
autoist will have his machine out of the
road and cover il with grass and brush.
IN order that no morse shall take fright
pending repairs.
Sec. I. In case the autoist hears a
farmer returning from town on Saturday
nignt utterinG whoops and bouncing his
end gate in such manner that it can be
heard a mile distant. the machine shall
be turned and sent over the back track
at full speed until the driver passes a
house where a bare armed lady carrying
a club Is hanging on the front gate, look
ing down the road toward town.
See 8. When q wagon Is sighted ahead
the auteist Will stop his machine a half
mile distant, approach with cigars, a bot
tie. and white flag, and IN case the man
on the seat remains cold, the autoist
win signal the driver, who shall approach
with a hand-psinted mirror for the wife
and toys for the children.
Sec. s.-The touring machine shall
change color with vegetation, according
to the season, In order that they may be
rendered as inconspicuous as possible.
During April and May they shall be green
10 match the grass In June they shall
be golden, to match the wheat: in July
and August they shall be pale gray. to
match the dust that covers everything in
the country; In September they shall be
green again, to match the corn; In Octo-
Der they shall be red, to match the su-
mac; In November they shall be yellow,
10 snatch the pumpkin, ana in December
white. TO match the snow.
When the Robinson amendments
we're read the house laughed at every
section, and at the conclusion OF the