Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1907-07-05
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DRIFTwOOD
BY LUE +. VERNON

Is the pistol mighticr than the
Big Stick"
Teddy says he never swears.
What never?
1t ism t what you say when you
swear. but what you mean, that
counts.
Tacoma has 4 two-headed calf. 1t
should prove Il novelty among so
many dough-heads.
With the big stick and big pis-
tol Teddy may say with Cato:
Thus am doubly armed.
Picking berries would be far bet
ter for those people in Seattle who
seemingly never pick anything but
pockets.
The price of thread has gone up a
cent spool. In spite of this. there
will be no let up in the sowing of
wild oats.
Grow Indian Lands to BE OPP
ened. says an exchange. The red
|
whisky, no doubt.
The congregation of a Lancaster.
Pa, church pays the rent of one red
rose. Most of us know men who are
paying the rent of a daisy.
How much gold can we spare?"
is query of the New York Enning
Post. 1t is assumed that it is not
awaiting an answer from us.
While Teddy" was opposing race
suicide, Harry Orchard was acting
on the conviction that the race
wasn't suiciding fast enough.
The ends of justice would be sub
served by the Imprisonment of the
ice-trust in a coal mine and in keep
ing the cOal-truSt confined in cold
storage.
A Washington negro has written
a laudatOry ode to the Interstate
Commerce Commission. 1t is plain
he is not looking for job as train
porter just at this time.
Seemingly, as reported by Seattle
newspapers, the only thing going
down" in the Queen City, instead of
going up" is corpse. Still num-
bers of these are going up" in
smOke-crematOry.
Carroll d. Wright says that the
only term the President uses for the
purpose of giving emphasis to his
remarks is BY GeOrger' Teddy
must have so far escaped the effect of
q misdirected blow with a hammer
while driving nail.
Teddy" says the limits himself
in profanity to be BY George" IL
hard pressed by the w. C. T. u, or
the Mothers Congress, he would
doubtless insist that this refers to
George Washington and not to the
patron saint of England.
1t was to be expected. Nan Pat
terson was in Pittsburg recently,
where she was conspicuous in res
taurants and cafes when the lights
were brightest. Certainly. Nan
is hunting for another dough-headed,
brainleSS animal, known as man, to
work for money, as she did Young.
Louis Pedic, in Seattle, after eat
ing bag of peanuts and drinking
two bottles of pop, died within two
hours. Poor Louis. Think how much
happier would his dear friends"
have been to-day, no doubt, had
Louis only eat mess of healthful,
delicious Olympia oysters, and drank
two bottles of the cheerful, invigor-
ating Olympia beer, Its the wa
ter" Poor Louis.
If the President has said that he
never uses stronger language than
by George" he must have for
gotten - which seems incredible 3
something he wrote himself about
himself when alone in Cuba In his
autobiography called THE Rough
Riders" he says: II had been jok-
ing with some and swearing at 9th
ers, as the exigencies of the case
seemed to demand"
The appearance of forest after u
cold storm of rain has passed over it,
always seems to wear its most dis
agreeable look. The dripping twigs,
the branches loaded overhead with
water, every rustic of which brings it
down in torrents, the cold, sticky
leaves, the wet, shining bark of the
trees, and the chilling wind that
sOughs through the woods, all induce
q feeling of desolation and dislike,
especially when it's your fist day in
camp.
Rev. M. A. Matthews, of Seattle,
speaking of dishonest, fake employ
ment bureaus, conducted in Seattle.
hit the nail square on the head when
he said: In this free country of
ours, every man has a right to re-
ceive a just compensation for his
services. Whenever any man, any
organization, or any bureau under
takes to abridge that right, the law
ought to be vigorously enforced to
protect the laborer." Amen, l say,
to that.
Mayor Moore, of Seattle, says the
reason he closed all the grocery
stores on Sunday in the Queen City,
was because complaint had been
made that the clerks were made to
work full seven days q week and on
Saturday nights. Moore says that
delicatessen stores can remain open
Sundays. You see Moore doesn't t
care a darn about the clerks in
delicatessen stores, or how many
days they work, but grocery clerks
must have q day off. Consistency
thou art jewel"
After all, a mans reputation is
only what men think him to be-his
character. You can not long pass
a counterfeit character for the genu.
inc coin on this shrewd old world,