Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1907-12-18
LOST HIS TEMPER.
A Domestic Tale For the Hot Headed
Man to Digest

A certain prominent lawyer not
ed for having a temper when pro-
voked was invited, with his wife, to
a doings out in sassiety the other
night.
OF course he got out his evening
clothes, including an expansive
bosomed shirt and all the rest of
the full dress outfit.
When he was all ready to start,
and his wife kept remrking that
they were late, he noticed that his
patent feathers looked sort Of dingy
down about the sole, and his wife
agreed that his shoes didn't look
right Then he remembered that
they had some liquid shoe polish in
the house that would be just the
thing, and he went after it.
As he was finishing the left shoe
he Strengthened up for a moment
and noticed that. he had dropped
wee teentsy drop of the polish on
his snowy white shirt bosom. 1t
was such small particle, hardly as
big as a pin head, that it wouldn't
have mattered. Probably no one but
himself would have noticed it. But,
finding it there just as he was about
TO start for the society event that
he was to be dragged off to, it ruff
fed him.
'Look at thisp he called to his
wife.
81 don't see anything but a little
speck on your shirt responded the
faithful and doting wife mildly.
That's all you see, hey? Well,
you'Il see mOre'n that pretty quick.
I'm here to tell you! II this dauber
and shirt are going to give me trou-
Bile, III just make the shirt look
real good and rotten while we're
at it~ Whereupon he took the
dauber and drew two broad black
lines down over the shirt bosom,
then two across, forming a double
cross effect; then to that he added
lot of scrolls and crosses at diff
ferent angles until the shirt front
looked Ikea dissipated printers
towel.
"Now, then" remarked the law
yer triumphantly.
81 should say it was now, thenp
Now, then, indeed~ This from his
wife. "Now we can't 90 to the par
ty at all-and after going and get
ting a new gown for the affair! All
on account of that abominable, un-
governable temper of yours~ And
she swept from the room.
The-lswyer by that-timc was cool
ing down. His work on his shirt
front had served to relieve his tenn
per just as he intended it to, and be
began then to look for another shirt,
but every other dress shirt had been
sent to the laundry, and all the
stores were closed. He happened
to think of a friend up the street !
who would wear about the same
size shirt he did, and he rushed to
the phone to call him up, but the
exchange girl handed him back that
tantalizing "They don't answer"
and then it occurred to him that OF |
course the friend wasn't at home,
for of course he and his wife were
by that time on the way to that |
same party that he should have been
on his way to by that time like an
upright, decent gentleman.
His wife was right-they would
have to stay home, and he knew
what it meant to keep his wife
home from something for which she
had bought brand new outfit.
There was no chance to shift the
blame either. His wife had him
literally with the goods on, and the
goods were still there on his shirt
front.
If you think by reading on far
ther you'll find that he got out of it
you might as well go
ahead and finish your breakfast or
whatever you're doing. They stay
ID home.
And, although that was several
lays ago and he's been taking
Kings home to his wife every even
ng since and staying in nights and
LONG the model husband act like
me that was brought up to it, he
hasn't squared himself yet.-Cleye-
opd plain Doalor