davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
TFrom the Chicago News. ]

From the chicago news
"Ablutionary studio" is Bostonese
for bathroom.
A woman seldom gets old enough
to admit she is that old.
It's no sign that a cat has money
because she carries her purrs with
her.
There are times when every small
boy wonders what parents are good
for.
Mosquitoes are free from one vice
at least. They can't stand cigarette
smoke.
AS soon as a man is satisfied with
himself the neighbors begin to feel
sorry for his wife.
misfortune occasionally comes to
a man on his wedding day, but he
doesn't seem to mind 1t bit.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS.
HOME NEWS WHILE AWAY.

Subscribers of the State journal
away during the summer may have
the paper mailed regularly each day
to any address mt the rate of ten cents
a week or thirty cents month (by
mail only. Address changed as often
as desired. While out OF town the
State Journal win be TO you like
daily letter from home.
Advance payment Is requested ON
these short time subscriptions, to save
bookkeeping expense.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR

rFrom the New York Press.1
Did anybody ever see a girl buggA
riding with one-armed man?
Maybe this world is a preliminary
purgatory to get you used to it.
Hammocks save some people from
becoming engaged by not getting in
them
girl likes to have you fatter her
SO she can think it over and decide
you meant it.
A woman saves money to spend it; a
from him
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23
HUNOR or THE Day

You are nervous wreck" announced
| the house physician.
Doctor, what do you adviser"
.old man. ! advise you candidig to 60
Herald.
| Shell have thrown your fountain pen
| He-what did you do that fort
She-so you wouldn't have an excuse for
not writing to me while I'm away!-Yon-
| kers Statesman.
Looking a Gift Horse in the waist
gardener CASTOR suitJ-So you've got
| the clothes on, Biffens7
Biffens--Yes. sir But. law! they'll cost
The Girl-A bachelor is self-confessed
The Man-How do you make that out?
The Gir!-His state proclain1s that ne
him, or not smart enough to take care OF
her IL he gets one.-Cleveland Leader.
The poet gazed in triumph at his latest
staEza. Best thing ever done, ne
chuckled. Il ought TO get something for
come within the jurisdiction of the law,
so there was no sentence passed upon
him.-Milwaukee Sentinel
Mrs. Wall Street Ito farmer by roadside)
I'm So glad to see you gong n 70, ZOE
made a great deal of money out OF that In
the city. Life.
Nan-Young Mr.. KetchIey is away on
his vacation. isn't he? Are you and he on
corresponding terms?
Fan-Not quite-but were on picture
postcard terms.-Chicago Tribune.
Really, said Edith, IT don't care what
sort of husband 1 get"
why, Edith exclaimed her mother,
I'm surprised at you"
as he's rich and handsome and kind to me
don't care, SO there, now!'-Philadelphia
Press.
DO you think we ought to keep sum-
to eat in the house. We've just got to-
ST. Louis Post-Dispatch.
do you take this woman to be your
welded wife?' asked the minister.
NO. SIR" responded the absent,minded
ly. that there is no truth in the rumor
whatever. '-washingto Star.
my friend links says he can't catch up
with his orders
rs he manufacturer
"O'h, no; just a married man with five
grown daughters louisville Courier
Journal 4
At a Ball.-"why so pensive. Herr Lie6-
"Ah. frauIein, I am in a frightful d.
and if I don't dance tonight the colonel
ing.'-Lustige Blaetter
Or. Wiley advises sleep. the sleep of
'sWeii, a baby is usually called an inno-
cent. and If I didn't sleep more than the
average baby I'd have brain storm
Houston Post.
A Billville citizen found the following
notice posted on his door; You an your'n
must leave here this mornin'-an' burned
quick, tool"
John" said his wife, "I wouldn't go eff
I wuz you. kaze you hain't done nuthin'
to go fer"
IT know 1t, Molly" he replied. but
reckon I'll go. I've been keepin' too still
lately, an I'm needin' exercise, an lots
of it. Gimme a clean shirt, and git
yer bonnet!'-Atlanta Constitution.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

The two Kansas Citys, which are vir-
tually one community. now claim a
population of 100000. and at the present
rate of increase it will not be many
years before they pass the half million
mark. These two cities have been
builded by Kansas wealth almost ex-
clusively. Added to their natural ad-
wantages. the railroads have compelled
every town and hamlet IN Kansas to
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

Coxey, it is announced, is to lead an
other army of unemployed. But where
will he get his unemployed? The only
unemployed in the country today are
those who are so rich they do not have
to work and those whose wives support
them by taking in washing, and the
latter would be too lazy to march with
Coxey or anyone else,
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

Attorney General Hadley. of Missouri,
who alone of all Republicans has been
talked as the next Republican nominee
for governor, has received some ex-
ceedingly hattering offers to go east
and engage in the law business as soon
as his term as attorney general ex-
pires. The corporations, noting how he
has camped on their trail as attorney
general. will very likely second any
plan that will keep him from becoming
chief executive.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23
Honor at the George Junior Republic


Honor at the George Junior Republic
When the citizens had gathered
Mr.. George and Jim together entered
the schoolhouse where the meeting
was held. Every citizen was on
hand. The new secretary of state sal
gravely and expectantly at the desk
The prisoners were there in their
striped suits in charge of the boy
keeper, and the other officers were
in their several places. Jim came
forward and took his place. He SEEM
ed dazed, and in a mechanical way
called the meeting to order. 1t was
hard work for him to speak at first,
and he began in a stumbling manner
to explain the object of the meeting.
Then he gradually gained confidence,
and finally told the story of his
crime, only keeping back the names
of his copartners in the theft. He
did not spare or excuse himself, but
cOfessed it all.
The citizens were as silent as death,
and seemed. not to know what to
make of this new development. At
first they had only been astonished,
but gradually this feeling gave way to
one of sympathy with the brave fell
low who stood before them. Finally
Jim closed by saying:
81 amt fit to be president" and
drawing a paper from his pocket he
turned to the secretary of state and
added, Here's my resignation
But the secretary folded his arms
decidedly. settled himself more firm
ly in his seat, and refused to accept
the document
Jim looked around helplessly for a
moment, and then turning to Mr..
George said, well, then, If you won't
come and take it, I'll have to hand
it to Daddy''-and he did.
Next, turning toward the prison
ers' pen, he said to the keeper:
i've broken the laws of the Re
public, and deserve to be in jail.
Here, Jake, I'm your prisoner; come
and arrest me-" But Jake likewise
shook his head and would not bulge.
Jim, stepped down from the platform,
remarking:
We'll, If you won't come to me, I'll
have to go to you"
Marching over to the dock, the ex-
president sat down on the bench be-
side the prisoners, put his head in his
hands, and burst into tears, exclain-
ing. my God, it's all over, and feel
betteri" There was not a dry eye
in the room. The citizens were dumb,
but their sympathies were evidently
all with the self-confessed culprit.
For some time no one spoke or stir
red. Then the judge arose. and with
firm tread strobe to the front. With
evident emotion. he said laconically,
That's what / call sand!'-From
Jim: A Story of the George Junior
Republic" by D. L. Pierson, in the
August Circle.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

Secretary Taft having given out the
plans and specifications which he thinks
would make a good president, and the
people having approved them, the only
thing that remains to be done is to
make that sort of man president
Curiously enough, the new plans and
specifications are remarkably like those
Of the present Incumbent of the Job.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

Lawrence disposes of this Quantrel
controversy by saying that if this Van
couver claimant is Quantreu, every
body knows that Quantrell is such a
liar that nobody can believe him, and
80 he is probably not telling the truth
when he claims to be alive. Lawrence
doesn't propose to worry about it,
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

A Kansas man with forty-horse
power farm engine has discovered that
IT can do the work of 20 mules 1t does
not necessarily follow, however. that
one mule is IS good as two horses.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

Congressman Phil Campbell is just
home from Europe Did Philip inquire,
during his trip, whether the steel trust
sells it's rails cheaper in Europe than
1T does in America, thanks to the tariff
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

It is said that Leavenworth jointists
are ANGRY" because they have been
arrested for liquor selling. Leaven-
worth jointists are really not accus-
toned to such treatment.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

You really cannot blame a trust for
shaking in its boots these days. The
trusts do not know what railroad will
turn states evidence next and take an
immunity bath.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

Now that wireless te1egraphy has
been almost perfected. why doesn't De
Forrest or Marconi or some other in
vento- start in on strikeless teIegraphy :?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

told her. It's burned up. But I'll
buy another
She smiled at that. and her eyes as
they met his held in them all the
promise of friendship. and more than
friendship that was to come.-(Copy-
righted 1907 by Homer Sprague.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

IF Knox and Fairbanks and Root and
Uncle Joe Cannon would consolidate
their presidential booms. they might
make some showing, but their booms
are small potatoes and few in a hill
when considered Separately
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

pay tribute to the towns at the mouth
or the Kaw, thereby building them to
their present greatness.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

There will be fewer Chautauqua as
semblies in Kansas next year than
there have been this summer-unless
number of new towns get the fever
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

The Equitable Life Assurance society
has over 81. 0OO.0 900 invested in Kansas
property. That is far better than hav-
ing it in Wall street securities.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

Zone may now ride from New York
TO Portland by trolley" says an ex-
change. But 1t Is Portland, Me.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

A man in Ohio who recently died at
the age of 102 never took a dose of
medicine. No wonder he died.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

kansas has no city of $4,000" says
the Wichita Eagle. Evidently the Eagle
has not cast it's eagle eye down at the
mouth of the Kaw.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

The army worm is doing damage in
some parts of the country. Why not
court martial it?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23
FROM OTHER PENS
SOCIALISM IN AMERICA.

Much is said of the growth of So
cialistic sentiment in this country, but
We are clearly far behind England in
the public interest which is taken in
this subject. This is shown in a varf-
ETY. of ways. In the development, for
instance, of a political party which is
ostensibly socialistic is seen a crys-
utilization of opinion not reached in
America. In the circulation gained by
the works of writer's who defend these
principles a sign is manifest. In the
disposition OF benevolent people to look
toward these almost world-old
schemes as a means of ameliorating the
conditions of the poor there is a token
of spread of the doctrine that CO.
operative or communistic methods
should supplant individual systems of
Industrial management.
1t is true that these tendencies are
not unknown in America. Though we
are going the European way more
slowly, 1t is quite conceivable that
much more will be done in this line
before we experience the reaction
which will inevitably ensue.-Phila-
deIphia Ledger
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23
PRIVATE OR PUBLIC.

A man at Chanute who has rallied
as promoter is offering to run the
water and light plants Of the city and
give to the city five per cent of the
gross receipts. The man says he can
still make money. Possibly he can,
but when the element of commercial
ism gets in a municipal plant it is
gone. The idea of municipal owner
ship is to remove the incentive for
traff1cing in the health and we'll be-
ing of the community. Where private
gain Is opposed to a good water sup
ply the latter always suffers.-Law-
renee Journal.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23
AFTER COMMENCEMENT.

Starting on life's battle
In the month of June,
Grayce is In the parlor
Pounding out a tune.
Waging Hfe's great warfare,
Doughtiest of girls,
May is in the hammock
Reading tales of earls.
Fighting life's hot contest
With a heart of oak,
Bill is on the golf field
Practicing a stroke.
PA is in the office
Toiling like a Turk,
Ma is in the kitchen
Doing up the work.
Wilson in New York SUM-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23
KANSAS COMNENT
AS FOR PREMATURE BURIAL.

As FOR PREMATURE BURIAL.
The Society for the Prevention of
Premature Burial, which has just
been making the flesh of all of us
creep. ought to go to ireland for
lesson In prevention. 1t was the prac-
tice until quite recently, to expose the.
Dody or the corpse before the door OF
the house in which the death had
taken place. Then passers-by, desir-
Gus that the dead should have a right
good burying. dropped money on the
ready plate.s This afforded time for a
revival, If revival were humanity pos.
sibIe: Sad to say, however, the prac-
tice led to imposture. Needing a holi-
Gay, instead OF his wake, man
would lie out and feign death Thus
Il happened that a man was stretched
nat before a cabin door. and the IA
mlIlar receptacle invited the gifts of
the charitable A lady in passing drop
ped sfxpence and stopped to gather
up the fivepence change. "Arrah!
ma am" expostulated the corpse, "be
generous vance in your life and don't
moind the change. "-Wichita Eagle.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23
IS JOHNSON THE MAN?

been mentioned so often and so prom
inently in connection with the Demo-
cratic presidential. candidacy for 1908
that many persons are beginning to take
him seriously. The fact that he Is Col
onel Watterson's dark horse" helps him
only to the extent that the colonel joins
a good many other Democrats in think
ing that he would be a good man for
the candidacy. 1t is not surprising that
many Democrats. disheartened at their
party's long series of defeats and hu-
Mutations, turn to him for deliverance.
1t Is not at all certain that Governor
Johnson could carry his state for presi-
dent. 1t is entirely certain that he could
not carry the country. But in these
anti-Democratic days Governor John
son would probably make as strong a
run for the presidency as any man who
could be thought of as Democratic
nominee.-St. Louis Globe-Democrat.
ALL SCHOLARS.
Secretary Wilson will have no Latin
words carved on the new building or
the agricultural department.; but why
does he tolerate allegorical figures or
namenting the ediflce? They are as
"rubbishy" as the Latin words he has
ordered cut out. Fortunately, he cam
not get at the national motto He Is
not so com plimentary to his clientele
ming for governor of Massachusetts
against John D. Long. In one or his
speeches he said: what has this Mr..
Long ever done that he should be
elected governor? I never heard that
he had done anything except to trans
late Virgil's Aeneid, and that was of
no use to the Democrats of Massa-
chusetts, for every one of them can
read the Aeneid in the original
Philadelphia Record.
REFORM.
There is a way for the Standard Oil
trust not to pay big fines. Quit vio-
lating the law. There were scores of
oil companies doing business before
the Standard drove them out of bust
ness by Illegal methods. What
blessing il old-time competitive condi-
lions could be restoredi-Ralefgh
News and Observer.
AT ATLANTIC CITY.
England has nothing to brag about
Atlantic City has q Lady Godiva pa
geant every day.-Philade1phia North
American.
THE UNIVERSAL HOPE.
1t is hoped that messages of peace
may soon be passing between the tele-
graphic employers and employes.-St-
Louis Post-Dispatch.
UNHOLY.
Every holy war shows that there is
not much in a name.-Chicago News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23
UNHOL1

Every holy war shows that there Il
not much in name.-Chicago News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23
SOME STARTLING FIGURES

What startling things we hear
Ihere are $4,000 inhabitants in this
Judicial district, and in the last six and
one-half years there have been seven
teen murder trials. In five more in
stances the murderers have escaped.
what showing this is. What has got
into our people? Listen further: Dur
ing the civil war many men were
killed. Yet there were only fifty-nine
more men killed on the Union side in
that war than were murdered in
America in the four years from 1901
10 1905 Is not this startling Flaw
renee Journal
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23
THE UNIVERSAL HOPE

1t is hoped that messages of peace
may soon be passing between the tele-
graphic employers and employes.-St
Louis Post-Dispatch.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23
SENATnR RREWER

senator Brewers indignation be-
cause the railroad commissioners re-
fuse 10 order two-cent passenger
fare is commendab1e. We all remem-
per now valiantly the senator fought
Tor two-cent fares last winter. He
nad little bill which he nursed care
1ully, SO carefully in fact that it never
was IN danger of getting into law.
SUBJECT for exhibition but its qualities
were SO entirely exhibitional that the
senator never had the remotest idea
OF passing it. The insincerity of SEN
ator Brewer and the other members
OF the lodge made two cent fares i'm
possfble.-Lawrence Journal
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

Mrs. Wall Street Ito farmer by roadside)
Pm SO glad to see you going In for
wheat, Mr.. Hayrick. My husband has
made great deal of money out of that in
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

Nan-Young Mr.. KetchIey is away on
his vacation, isn't he? Are you and he on
corresponding terms?
Fan-Not Quite-but we're picture
postcard terms.-Chicago Tribune.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23
J4YHAWKER JOTS

Alfalfa seed is worth $1,000 a bushel.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23
REFORM.

: 4 I "A I11xA4N I u u I I
England has nothing to brag about
Atlantic City has q Lady Godiva pa
geant every day.-Philadelphia Nortl
American.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1907-08-23

Shell have thrown your fountain pen
away
He-what did you do that fort
She-So you wouldn't have an excuse for
not writing to me while I'm away!-Yon-
kers Statesman.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-06-18
NEWS FROM
OTHER TOWNS
MT. FREEDOM.

Isaac Clark, wife and grandson OF
Brick Church were visiting relatives
here last. week.
While Mrs. Ellison Coe was at Nor
ristown last week thieves took her to-
mato plants, an oyercoat and skirt
from the woodhouSe.
Mrs. Charles MlnguS of Morristown
was entertained by relatives here on
Thursday last.
Mrs. Frank Hazen and daughter OF
Dover wei the guests Of her mother
for couple of days last week.
Miss Josephine Blackwell has re-
turned to her home from the State
Normal School,
Mrs. Peter Kennerup is visiting her
sister, Mrs. Linabury, near Flanders.
Jerry Baldwin and family of New
ark arrived at their home here on Sat-
urday last.
The Ladies' Aid Society meet on
Wednesday next and in the evening
there will be lawn sociable held on
the grounds of the parsonage.
Arthur Burnett. wife and son of the
Government Powder Works was the
guest of his father, e. @. Burnett on
Sunday last.
George Wright has taken position
at the Morris Plains Hospital.
Joseph Cannata, wife and daughter
from Florida are here for the summer.
James Hubert and wife are visiting
in New York City for few days.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-06-18
SENATOR H1LLER4 MENTIONED.
In an article on the Dickinson affair

In an article on the Dickinson affair
the Jersey City Journal" after set
ting forth the failure of Governor
Stokes and Secretary Dickinson to
both set at the State House at the
same time says: Governor Stokes
will surely ask for the Colone's resig-
nation, and it appears to be taken for
granted that the Colonel will refuse
to resign. Then will come the tug OF
war. OF course, the Colonel is apt to
change his mind, but there is no in
dication OF that now. His friends say
he will never quit under fire, even I'M
der a threat of impeachment proceed
ings. Already the slate workers are
at work on the probable successor to
Colonel Dickinson, should the latter
resign as Secretary of State, or be i'm
peached. The names most prominent
ly mentioned are those of former AS
sistant United States Postmaster
General William M. Johnson, Of Ber-
gen, Senator William M. Bradley, of
Camden and Senator Thomas J. Hill
lery, Of Morris. 1t is not at all likely
that Johnson would take the place.
He accepts public office seriously, and
in his'preSent condition Of health he
would probably not be able to give it
the required amount of attention.
Senator Bradley, it is believed, would
be acceptable, but the chances of Sen
ator Hillery are even better. AL
though he is d younger man than
Bradley, Hiilery has carved out an en-
viable reputation for himself in Re-
publican politics, and is one of the
leading figures in New Jersey. His
name has been frequently mentioned
for GOyernorShip hOnOrS.D
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1907-06-18

A CONSTITUTIONAL provision pro-
hibiting the appointment of member
of the Legislature to any Office whose
emoluments have been increased dur
ing the term for which he was elected
to the Legislature is barrier in the
path of Senator James f. Minturn of
Hudson county, to the Supreme Court
bench. Two years ago Senator Min
turn voted for a bill increasing the
salary of Supreme Court justices ST.
600 year. A similar situation arose
when Ex-Governor George t. Werts
was elevated to the bench during his
term as Senator, He, too, had voted
for an increase in the salaries OF the
judiciary, and to make him eligible
the Legislature passed special act
repeating the salary increase bill. A
similar course may be pursued in Sem
ator Minturn's case.