Los Angeles herald., 1907-06-17

NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. gentleman OF
good manners as private secretary.
Apply L. Lindsay, 475 Pacific Electric.
That three line. ad. printed In The
Herald a week ago today, without Mr..
Lindsay's knowledge, came very near
causing a riot.
Before the elevator started running
Monday morning educated gentlemen
Of good manners" began putting in
their appearance. At first they came
by ones and twos Later, by COM
panies and battalions.
BY the time Mr.. Lindsay arrived on
the scene his outer office was crowded
and long line of men extended down
the corridor and around the turn.
Now L.. Lindsay is president of the
California Tile and Terra Gotta COM
pany. His firm does a good business,
but he had not knowingly advertised
bargain sale, and he couldn't under
stand the meaning of the rush.
1t didn't take him long, however, to
find out what was doing. The first
man presented copy of The Herald
containing the ad. and asked anxiously
If the place had been filed.
Private Secretary superfuous
Mr.. Lindsay was nonjlused. He
hadn't advertised for private secre-
tary: he didn't want a private secre-
tary and he had no need for a private
secretary.
All these things were explained care
fully to the applicant and the man left
There remained, however, some sew
enty-five or a hundred men in the hall
TO be reckoned with.
AS rapidly as possible the situation
was explained to them and for the
most part they left the building quiz
etly and without objection. Some few
of them, however, were unable to ap-
preciate the joke and Immediately pro-
| ceeded to mlsIay the good manners"
| they had brought with them in re-
| sponse to the ad ss sef
| They didn't like being made game
of and they didn't hesitate to say so
as emphatically as they knew how.
One man declared that he had passed
UP chance of profitable employment
| in San Diego to answer the ad. An
other in the crowd promptly congratu-
lated the kicker on having been spared
the necessity of living In San Diego
and said he owed debt of gratitude
| to the author of the ad, even IL he had
| to go hungry as result of missing
| that southern train.
Couldn't See Joke
This little pleasantly wasn't received
| In a kindly spirit and for a moment 1t
looked as though the two would mix
| it la Tom McCarey, but the others
interfered and hostilities were averted.
| Finally the crowd melted away and
| in the offices Of the California Tile
and Terra Gotta company business was
resumed along normal lines.
Then the telephones began to ring.
Each call was for IL. Lindsay" and
each caller wanted job as private
| secretary. In turn they were told that
there was nothing doing. Long dis
tance wanted Mr.. Lindsay. A minute
later it developed that long distance
was a gentleman of good manners"
temporarily residing in San Bernar-
dino, but willing to move to Los An
geles for a consideration. Again ex-
plantations and again silence-for thir-
| ty-seven seconds.
More calls in person and more ex-
plantations. Then the postman. with
half bushel of mail. Pretty prompt
work that 1t was the first morning
delivery. "L. Lindsay looked at the
pile of letters, muttered something un-
der his breath and fed, leaving 1t up
to the secretary.
USES tbs mdStCTS VoiCC .t,k-
Applicants continued to arrive mo-
mentarily. The secretary explained
until he became hoarse. Then a clerk
spelled him and finally the office boy
was pressed into service and sta
toned in the hall to keep the horde
Of place seekers outside.
Within the office 1t got so that no
one dared answer the telephone. Fin
ally they disconnected the wires to
escape the incessant ringing. The thing
had long since passed the bounds Of
joke and had become an Internal
nuisance.
At last some one in the office had a
brilliant idea. Stealthily he sneaked
out and made his way through the
waiting crowd in the hall. Down the
street he went and to shop where
graphophones are for sale. There he
took machine on approval and armed
with blank record returned to the
Pacific Electric building.
Again inside he started the ma
chine to work and talked into it as
clear an explanation of the situation
as his somewhat ruffled temper would
permit.
Next he took that graphophone into
BILE in front of the door and started
1t to work.
Not in the Business
Then he turned to the Office, lighted
cigar and sat down to enjoy life.
For g. time all went we'll. The graphic
phone did the explaining and di 1t
so politely that there was no riot.
Half an hour later a woman entered
the office, accompanied by snub-
nosed, freckle-faced girl of about 10.
''I thought you might like to hear
GeneYieYe sing" she said. Since the