The Washington herald., 1907-07-17

/ The wizards Of the Agricultural De
partment are now at work trying to
evolve a crowless rooster. When they
complete their job the citizens who re-
side in the vicinity Of Tenth and NJ
streets northwest are going to erect to
the memory of the successful scientist a
monument inscribe on 1t his name in
gold, top It with wreath of laurel and
bay. and pension his family.
Mrs Silas Boyce, who lives in the dis
tfict mentioned. VIII contribute to the
monument and also to the pension fund.
for her name heads the list Of signatures
| to an indictment OF the roosters that have
Of late settled around Tenth and NJ
streets northwest Commissioners Mac
farland, West. and Morrow will chip in,
and Maj. Sylvester will quietly help the
good cause along
Then there Is the Nobel Peace Prize of
$4,000. 1t was stated on both NJ and
Tenth streets last evening, that the jury
which is to award this prize will not
have to take more than one ballot when
Secretary Wilson's wizard invents the
crowless chanticleer.
BOOSTERS Lack Tact.
A careful investigation Of the agitation
in the neighborhood Of Tenth and NJ
streets northwest, would indicate that the
trouble lies in the fact that the ROSTERS
OF that vicinity do not know heir place.
that they have no fine appreciation Of the
rights Of man, and that the teachings OF
the golden rule and the Constitution.
alike. are lost upon them.
The Indictment which was handed 10
the Commissioners yesterday. is directed
specifically against one villairous feather
ed nuisance in a yard in the rear Of
Tenth street. but It also arraigns divers
unspecided roosters. the owners, and ex-
act location whereof are Ito your petit
TONERS unknown"
The complaints against the rOosters Of
the city Of Washington fill many pages
In the legal record OF the courts Of the
District Of Columbia. The minutes Of the
Commissioners scinuilate with many
brilliant scathing philippe uttered by in
dignant citizens against the arch-enemy
of the peace Of man after midnight. Fin
ally, yielding TO the clam0r Of an out
ragged public. a regulation was passed
making it a heinous offense TO install a
rooster In any neighborhoOd in the city
OF Washington without the written con-
sent Of - per cent Of the inhabitants
thereof. AS a result. sweet peace hovered
over the Nations Capital and its deni-
zens had nothing 10 complain about ex-
cept roller skates on the sidewalks and
the location Of the District stables.
Right 90 Crow Restored.
This halcyon period lasted some months
when lawyer went into Judge Maloney's
court with a client and an arm fun of
books. knocked out the anti-rooster regu-
lation, and restored the pest In all its
glory. not only near the intersection OF
Tenth and " northwest. but in every
quarter of the city where the small boy
with his air gun did not hold forth. or
where the art OF stuffing corn with ar
senic had not yet become one Of the ac-
compllshments IN the line OF self-defense
And now the rooster question Is again
to the fore as a great civic problem in
the District building On one hand the
Commissioners are beSicged by a multi
SUde Of prOtcstants, and on the other
they face the Police Court decision which
restores 20 the fowl the right 10 crow
his head OF
In this dilemma all eyes are turned to-
ward the Agricultural Department. and
the residents Of Tenth and VI streets
northwest. are saving their fireworks and
their shouts Of JOY for the dawn OF that
great day when Secretary Wilson shall
proclaim the crowning achievement of
his wizards-the crowless chanticleer.