davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
SAW CHANGE FOR ECONOMY.
Pertinent Suggestion Made to Mem
Der of Congress.

There is a member of congress from
southwestern state who is pretty
well known in Washington for his
delight in the pleasures of the table.
Particularly is he fond of roasted ears
of corn, delicacy he never omits
an opportunity to indulge.
On one occasion, so runs the story,
the congressman was in a restaurant
in Texas, when the waiter placed
upon the table plateful of the dish
mentioned. The statesman proceed.
ed to help himself.
When he had consumed the fourth
ear of corn, he noticed that man
across the table was cycling him most
curiously. Thinking that some ex.
PLANTATION was necessary, the repre-
sentative good-naturedly informed the
stranger that roasted corn was one of
the most nutritious and palatable of
foods. Then he gathered unto him
self fifth ear, which he devoured
with great relish.
The man across the table could
stand it no longer.
my friend" he suggested, don't
you think you could save about a
dollar and half day If you were
to board in a livery stable? "-Harper' S
Weekly,
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
JUDGING FRoM OWN CASE.
Deacon Recognizes the Wants os : Fs's
low sufferer.

1870 n aq.a s4~~4-a
General Booth, the head q ~. ,ne pa !,
walton Army, was discusslns 80 49, -
suicide bureaus that bus chuien nas
opened. vp he aid.
.ora factors Of these bureaus. me
charity viii be Of the Fign. ns s,uo
trust There are. you nov ~" -
kinds of charity, and TOO nue. = =
is like the BARRIERS. - w.r.
"There was a poor deacon u va,
wick who had no money ana 1870 s.s-
TO be shaved, and he went ifon 100 800
to barber, but none OF them: 80 49,
his holy office, was Wiling - 9na'S
him for nothing. so,,na
h.rhar Who on hearing his tale, said
gruf1y: ~, ahoirn
"And this barber shaved nm. n .,,
the razor he used! Dear me. lts dgll
edge and the hicks in it! Under me
oneration the tears flowed In rlyuiets
down the poor deacon's cheeks y.
Suddenly the BARRIERS dog n mo
adjoining room set up q terrlhc noW'
ing. ..,,a.
And he muttered anxiously: what
can they; be doing to him!
"tAlas!' said the deacon, 7 shoulunt
wonder ii some one was snasihs AA.AA
out Of charity"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
FAMILY FOOD.
Crisp, Toothsome and Requires No
Cooking.

A little boy down in N. c. asked his
mother to write an account Of how
Grape-Nuts food had helped their fam
lily.
She says Grape-Nuts was first
brought to her attention on visit to
Charlotte, where she visited the Mayor
Of that city who was using the food by
the advice of his physician. She
says:
"They derive so much good from it
that they never pass a day without
using it. While was there used the
Food regularly. / gained about IS
pounds and felt so well that when I re!
turned home began using Grape-Nuts
in our family regularly.
'sMy little 18 months old baby short.
~ after being Weaned was very liz
with dyspepsia and teething. She waa
sick nine weeks and We tried eyervs
thing. She became so emaciated tha4
it was painful to handle her and wa
thought we were going to lose her
One day happy thought urged me Il,
try Grape-Nuts soaked in a little warna
milk.
"Well, it worked Hike charm ana
she began taking it regularly and i'm
provement set in at once. She is nog
getting well and round and fat as fast
as possible on Grape-Nuts.
Sometime ago several of the family
were stricken with LaGrippe at the
same time, and during the worst stages
we could not relish anything in the
shape OF food but Grape-Nuts and
oranges, everything else nauseated rs
We al appreciate what your "a.
nous food has done for our familv !,
There's a Reason" Read "Ihe Road
50 Wellyille." in pkgs. '>'
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
Mhv AduertIaIIln Pave.

.'You will be pressed for money
oftener because you have no advertis-
ing bills to pay than because you
have" observes the Buffalo News.
big advertising bills and big bank
balances grow, together, out Of the
same publicity campaigns" The mer.
chant who holds down his expense ac-
count by cutting out advertising saves
money just the way the railroads
would il they should stop buying coal
fer their locomotives. Without coal
the wheels won't turn; without pub
LEFTY trade comes to standstill. It
pays 30 throw silver out of the window
that gold may come in at the door.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
Writer an Untrue Prophet.

Said a writer in the Atlantic
Monthly just before the civil war:
Washington is the elysium of oddi.
ties, the limbo of absurdities, an i'm.
broglio of ludicrous anomalies
Planned on scale of surprising
grandeur, it's architectural execution
is almost contemplate. It has a
monument that will never be finished,
a capitol that lacks a dome and a
scientific institution which does moth
ing but report the rise and fall of the
thermometer" The prospect must
have been discouraging at that time,
but what a change we find to-day.
The scientific institute, whose ap-
parent inactivity was the cause of
such sarcastic comment, has given to
mankind the science of meteorology.
The monument is completed and it is
the most imposing memorial ever
raised by man to the memory of a
leader Of men. The capital has been
completed, and it's dome, soaring
among the clouds, is crowded with
the emblem of freedom that sym
bolizes the highest national attain
ments Of the human race.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
OF LittIe Faith.

At the Pine Grove camp ground in
Canaan, Conn, little girl was re-
moved by her mother for disobedience
and being naughty 10 her playmates.
The child was told that when she said
her prayers at night she should seek
forgiveness and ask the Lord to help
her be better girl. Here is the
prayer which the youngster made I'M
der protest:
/: "0h, Lord, want you to help me to
mind my mamma, to help me to be q
better girl, to help me to be good to
my playmates, to--but, pshaw, Lord,
what's the use? / 'spect you don't
believe half I'm saying"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28

Why-Dur tell me what happened"
. You always hated Herb didn't
your" chuckled Bige, accepting a
fresh cigar. And with great leisure
ness he related the misadventure of
Herb" Farnum to rapid fire accom-
paniment of phone ringing and timid,
but persistent taps on the door, Bur-
bank had relaxed and a smile fitted
over his face as the fine points of the
horse trade were brought out to the
discontinue of Herb
Tell me about little Lon Gibbs,
who used to go swimming with u.s."
urged Burbank.
He's done WELL" admitted Crankle.
Lions first selectman now Got a
nice girl, Alviry and two boys. She
goes with my Bessie. The Young
Folks Friday Evening club give Bes-
sic surprise party last week. took
her out drivin' and when we got back
they was all waitin' Well, sir, you'd
a died laughin' to see that young ones
surprise when they all jumped out at
her and said: Boot Bessie almost
dropt Bessie's fine. good girl,
bright as button, if I do say it.
You've got two girls, hain't you?
saw their picters once in a paper"
"Yes," assented Burbank. "How's
Sllas Whetherton
isis gone into the chicken business
on grand scale; don't know yet how
hen do with it, Spaakin' of ST re.
minds me I forgot to tell you Hattie
Dresser's married at last! Man from
over in East Seymour. Oh, l guess
Hattie grew UP an made a fool OF
herself after your time: She tried to
get 81 after his first wife died. But
he married Cass Green. You remem.
Der the Greens? Lived over near the
saWmill. Yes. Well, Cass was Amos
Green's daughter, tho rest were all
boys. Silas-"
''How's my chum Tommy Sother'
gill? He was in to see me few years
ago." broke in Burbank.
"The Judge? He's great! Same old
sixpence. He's built the finest place
In ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS lights (make
the Electricity themselves) and every
thing. Say, but we've got the richest
joke on the Judge! You remember
old Spike Peters
But knock came ON the door that
couldn't be ignored. Burbank opened
it reluctantly. 1t was the head clerk
with worried look on his face. He
held a consultation with his employer
and seemed to be urging the necessity
of prompt action upon the latter.
Abijah CrankIe got up and strolled
around the room gazing at various OBJ
iects to show how much at home he
was in Thomas Worthington Bur,
banks private Office.
Every well, sill" said the clerk, as
If he washed his hands of his erratic
boss. "Of course I'll tell him that
it was impossible to see him. And did
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
CANNOT AGREE ON STATUE.
Mrs. Sheridan and Famous Sculptor
Differ in Opinion.

The failure of J. @. A. Ward to salts
fy either himself or Mrs. Sheridan in
design for the proposed statue of Gen.
Sheridan to be erected in Sheridan
circle, in Washington, is not sur
prise to those who have followed the
case for nearly a score of years, nor
does it lessen the distinction Of the
venerable sculptor who has produced
much worthy work and done more to
elevate his profession than any living
American. Mrs Sheridan, like most
people who have lost their loved ones
by death, has idealized the maiily at
tributes of her distinguished husband.
To be acceptable design must real
ize these ideals, as well as those en-.
sArined in the memory OF those to
whom the original was &c title Phil"
and the committees idea of art, as
we'll as the modeler's own conception
of the man to be honored by the eff1gy.
Too much care cannot be taken in
the selection of public monuments
especially when designed for the ma
tional capital where the world expects
to find Americas best expression Of
her standards. Paradoxical as it may
seem, there Is in Washington, at the
present time, much poor sculpture and
yet, nowhere can the history of Ameri-
can sculpture be SO well studied. ST.
Gaudens' masterpiece, the Adams me-
mortal is there, also Daniel Frenchs
charming Gallaudet group; the Me
haus' Hahnemann statue and the
Ward equestrian statue of Gen.
Thomas, which is regarded as one Of
the best specimens of the kind in the
entire country.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
TWAS IN 'rATER TIME.
One Thing, at Least, the Mother Was
Positive About.

The late Senator Plat of Connec-
ticut enjoyed funny stories and could
tell a good many himself. Notwith-
standing his long public life, he al
ways remembered yarn that he car
ried from his school days.
One year when the district schools
opened in his town one of the teach
ers, in making a record Of the ages
of her pupils, as required by law.
found that one little girl, who came
from a family not noted for being
especially bright, was unable to say
when her birthday came.
So in order to complete her records.
the teacher walked two miles to see
the girls mother one afternoon after
school Asked if she could remem-
Der just when her daughter was born,
the woman thought for some little
time, and then with a sort of puz-
zled look, said:
"Well, the gal was born in later
time that's sure, but / can't member
whether they was a-plantin' on EN-
or a-diggin' on EN-"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
A Horses Good Fortune.

A spiritualist came to our house
some time ago and claimed to be able
to locate our lost friends If we de-
sired. We had an old horse which
we had sold years ago and my mother
wanted to know where he was. Moth
er began:
1--WE had very good friend who al
ways did all our work. He passed
from us several years ago and the
last we heard of him was that he
was in Los Angeles. / would like
to know if he is still living"
The spiritualist made certain mo-
tons and knocked on the table and
then said:
"Your friend is in Los Angeles and
is married to rich young woman" p
Judge.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
CASE OF ECZEMA IN soUTH.
Suffered Three Years Hands and Eye
Most Affected-Now Well and IL
Grateful to Cuticura.

''My wife was taken badly with ecze
ma for three years, and she employed
a doctor with no effect at all until she
employed Cuticura Soap and Ointment.
One of her hands and her left eye
were badly affected, and when she
would stop using Cuticura Soap and
Ointment the eczema came back, but
very slightly, but it did her a sight OF
good. Then we used the entire set Of
CSticura Remedies and my wife is en-
tireIy recovered. She thanks Cuficura
very much and viii recommend it
highly in our locality and in every
mock and copEer Of our parish. 4 NJ.
Robert, Hydf6polis, La, Jan. aud
Sent. i 1906"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
Eminent Government Employe

Notable among the government en-
ployes in Washington is that scholar.
ly gentleman, Mr.. Worthington Ford,
brother of the late Inflated novelist
Paul leicester Ford. Mr. Ford is a
man of wealth and culture, with a
beautiful suburban home at Cleveland
Park, near President Cleveland's old
home of Red Top" five miles from
the city Here he entertains literally
and delightfully."-. Mr.. Ford is biblio-
maniac and his house abounds in
priceless old volumes and manu-
scripts. For sheer love of the work
this unusual man fills comparatively
obscure position as chief of the manu-
script division of the library of con-
gress, where he handles many of the
most valuable documents in the world.
Mr.. Ford is an authority on the value
and antiquity of rare writings. He
has as much literary genius as his
more famous brother Paul leicester,
the author of 'The Honorable Peter
Sterling" although he is not profes.
SIOud4. 41C COALI1puICS SOnSAuCt duly /,
however, to the better magazines. The
interesting collection of manuscripts
from the library of congress now at
the jamestown exposition were select
ed and sent by Worthington Ford. He
is a man of uncommon personal
charms, who is much sought after in
the more cultured social circles at
the capital. Authors are his most fire.
quent house guests. Mr. and Mrs.
Ford have recently been entertaining
charming southern writer, Mrs. An
nulet Andrews Obi, whose forthcom.
ing novel, "The Wife of Narcissus,"
will be one of the literary events of
the autumn,
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
Wireless Washington.

Washington long ago took its stand
firmly against overhead electric wires.
It suffered severely from poor car
service for long time in order that
it might eventually secure the best
possible system. It's fight against
the overhead trolley was one of the
sharpest ever conducted within the
district against determined combina-
ton OF corporate interests. Congress
stood steadfastly by the citizens, and
the result was the evolution of sys-
tenn of conducted lines that is to-day
the admiration Of the country.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
A PardonabIe Fault.

DR. Edward Everett Hale, discuss
ing rather finicky attack that had
been made on certain recent state.
ments, smiled and said:
"But who or what is blamelesss? II
is like the case Of the Scottish hen.
An old Scottish woman wished to sell
a hen to neighbor.
"'But tell me- the neighbor said,
is she a'thegither guild bird? Has
she got nae faults, nae faults at ALP
'Awell, Margot,' the other old
woman admitted, she has got one
fault She will lay on the Lords day.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
IN THE suPERLATlvE DEGREE
Little Sons Explanation Seemed .
Cover the Case.

Little son, aged seven, whose tram
ing las been of the most painstaking
and conscientious, rather took away
his mothers breath in describing the
dogs game of ball. He ended with;
"And, mother, Topsy caught the pan
in her mouth, and then just ran ike
HI"
Like whatg cried the startled
mother.
"W'y, like h, don't you know
motber?" innocently.
mo, I don't believe do. just now
Ia that, aear?" she asked family.
"WelI, I don't know jus what i
means, myself" he confessed, but It's
. whole lot faster than 'lickety-split! :"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28

My doctor kept me on strict diet, but
as his medicine was not helping me,
I began using Doan's Kidney Pills.
They helped me at once, and soon all
traces of. sugar disappeared. / have
regained my former weight and am
perfectly well.''
Sold by all dealers. so cents box.
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
Statue Finally compIeted.

When Alfred Stevens designed the
noble monument to the duke Of We'll
lington in st. Paurs cathedral, Lon
don, he intended that his work should
be crowned by an equestrian statue.
But Stevens died before his design
was carried out. Now, 80 years after
his death, the equestrian statue has
been completed and before long will
be placed In position.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28

you say ten o'clock tomorrow morn
ing? Thank you, sir" The door
closed noiselessly
Say, Tom, l guess I'm hindering
you. I wouldn't want you to put your.
self out any for. me! I'll be getting
on over to the train, I guess. Better
to be three hours too soon than one
second late is my principle in catching
the steam cars"
That's all right, Bige, you don't
come down to the city every day and
while you're here I'm going to try and
give you few moments without the
whole universe at my heels. It's like
that day in and day out" explained
the hnanciay YEARLY. Now We'll
close the shop up and go out and have
luncheon and
you going to leave that railroad
car out there cooling his heels?" de
manded Bige admiringIy. t8
Well forget him." said Burbank
In fact, Bige, We'll play truant, just
as we did when we went to school to
Miss Case. Now come on before any.
one corners me. My motors at the
door and Wen have time for a little
spin before we eat. Haven't you? Oh
it's perfectly safe, Bige, and know
you'll like it. Browns a very careful
driver It'll be an experience to tell
EN- in Jacksonville. I tell you, Bige
it makes me feel young just to see
you. But say-Fm sorry to hear that
about Libbie."
.
mo, Kate, I'm not going to any re
ception this EVENING"" protested
Thomas Worthington Burbank, with
out glancing up from the little Daw
sonville paper that Bige Crankle had
given him. Bige had brought the pa
per to read while going and coming on
the train, but at the last moment had
presented it to his host in exchange
for a magazine. After I've just
glanced through the Jacksonville
Newsletter, I'm going to bed. Oh, by
the way, Kate-"Mrs Burbank was
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
After q Raise.

'What makes him look so solemn?
He gets his months salary to-mor-
row."
That's just the trouble. His wife
and his mother-in-1aw allow him so
cents week out of it, and he's try
ing to make up his mind to strike for
a dollar.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
UpuaIlant Silence.

Towne-"she says you're an imper-
tinent cad. What have you said or
done?"
Browne Nothing; that's the
trouble. When we were out walking
yesterday the wind blew her hair
about her face most becomingly, and
she said, Z know I'm a perfect fright.
/ didn't say a word"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28

that my housework
was becoming q bur-
den. l tired easily,
had no ambition and
was failing fast. My
complexion got vel
low, and T lost over
so pounds. My thirst
was terrible, a n d
there was sugar in
the kidney secretiOnS,
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28

old piacestryin' 10 scratch livin' out
~ that sld plain lauS. albert he's
fba ngxt mas gone to Bethany to work.
Hes EouiSe a smart feller. That fam
IIv's sort a'gone or Huldy's the only
nne Shats left of that whole family OF
s,irla. Cid Asa Sperry died a short
s sna11 haek sad thing. He was 81.
yon'ge Got q nice place here, Tom. !
s,,nrsDse they charge you as much Tor
fbesa rooms as for a whole faTm out
en- :way7 How many help do you
keeI-
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28

sweeping toward the door when her
husbands voice arrested her.
"Yes?"
"Ahem! Why-you see, my dear,
there's going to be what they call Old
Home Week in Jacksonville, and they
want me to be the guest of honor
There's quite piece about it here in
the Newsletter. No doubt they'll
want me to make the address of well
come or something of that sort. tell
you it means lot when your native
town acknowledges your success: You
can't fool those who have always
known you! As l was going to say
Now Kate, stop right there! You and
the girls always have your own way,
but this time you'll sidetrack any
plans you may have and accompany
me to Jacksonville! You can go to
Newport, or anywhere else, afterward.
It'll give you butterflies taste Of
something genuine and wholesome!
Jacksonville isn't place you go to
just to show off like the snob resorts
you tote me to. I regret you and the
girls are SO given to that sort of
thing. Dawsonville's a plain country
town and week of it will do us all
good! /"
Mother, aren't you comfng?" called
voice impatiently.
'In moment, Rose" answered Mrs.
Burbank 81 suppose then wen need
our plainest gowns and"
Now don't misunderstood me, my
DEAR interrupted Burbank hastily.
1--WE owe it to Dawsonville's glory to
be presentable! Well go in our new
| motor-we'Il have 1t before the fe-
teenth all right. Wait until you see
the sensation when Little Tommy
Burbank whizzes into town in a big
motor car! And when they see you
and the girls! Jacksonville always
was conceited over it's pretty girls,
but wait till it sees Kitty and Rose!
And Kate, If you or the girls want
anything, don't spare expense-you
! can use what you get later at New
port. We osse it to Jacksonville to
appear at Cur best!"
The Cherry: When you go back to
your home toWn-nothing's good
enoughl
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
Natural Elx.Raner.

The pingulcula is plant which is
natural fly-paper. Its leaves are
constantly covered with sticky SUBJ
stance that traps ali insects alighting
thereon
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
Clothes.

II men thought as much about their
cloihes as women do about theirs the
tailor would rank in importance above
the president.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
"The Wise Man Forsseeth Tie Evil

mo, sub, thank ye," said Alphonse.
tAh doan' wishes to wuk all de time,
sub. Ef All wuz ter WuE all de time,
Aid most likely hab aufF money ter
git married wifi, an eff All had nun
money to git married wifi. mos likely
Aid git married. No, sub! Deed All.
doan' wishes teT wuk all de time"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
They Appreciate It.

81 tell you there are a lot of men
who appreciate single 0lessedness. /"
Who are they?"
"The married ones. - Detroit Frss
Press.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28
WORN TO A SKELETON.
A Wonderful Restoration Caused a
Sensation in Pennsylvania
Town.

Mrs. Charles N. Preston, of Elkland,
Pa, says: Three years ago l found
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1907-09-28

The Cherry: When you go back to
your home toWn-nothing' good
enough!
Copyright, 1907, by w. G. Chapman.9