Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1907-05-03
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"He's perfectly wild over his new
auto" Huh! You should see him
under it."-Milwaukee Sentinel.
The young man spoke bitterly DO
you take me for a fool?" "Oh. George"
she said. this is so sudden."-Mem-
phis Journal.
Mrs. Nurich,p roudly-That clock on
the stairs is more than two hundred
years old Mrs. Blueblood Cutting
All, Of whom did you buy it?
First Authoritarian were laid up
in your house all last week. weren't
you? Second Millionaire-Yes. "Sick-
ness or investigation committee?'-
Life.
Brown-Do you think the Panama
Climate induces laZiness7 Town.
Does 1t? Why I tool some bees down
there once and they got SO lazy they
wouldn't sting.
Hodge-What's old Scribbles doingi
He looks poverty-stricken. Podge-He
Is writing a series of articles on How
to Get Rich Without Capital."-Cleve-
land Plain Dealer.
Mrs. Trust Magnate (newly rich)-
want Il of them octopus-shaped
rooms for the library. Cynical Archt.
tect-So appropriate, dear madam
Baltimore American.
Burr-Do you think the end Of the
world will ever come? Dock
thought it had this morning; my wife
mot hos ,-,. t~~A - --.-
a thing wrong with it.
The Agent-If you have this ma
chine. sir. you won't take anybody's
dust. The Magnate-Then l don't
want it. I'm out for ~everybody's
dust.-Cleveland Leader.
MISUNDERSTANDING resolved to
-aw-do something useful in the
world. doncher know. Miss DeStyle-
Indeed! Algernon-Yaws. l am-aw
learning to tie me own ties.-Chicago
Daily News.
what class Of people do you think
has been most benefited by the libra
ries you have founded?' Pm not
sure" answered Mr.. Dustin Stax.
But | kind of suspect it's the archi-
tects ."-Washington Star.
T~eacher-lf coal is So per ton. how
many tons could you get for $40. Dis
turbing Element-Three n Teacher
That's wrong. Disturbing Element
Il know it is, but they will do 1t
just the same.-Harvard Lampoon.
81 am a worthless thing.' exclaim-
ed the rejected and detected young
man, despairingly. "Oh. no" replied
the fair girl c%heerfully. mo worth
less. Your skeleton alone would sell
for twenty dollars.'-Somerville Jour
nal.
That was an awful break Bime-ly
made last night after he had proposed
to the rich Miss Anteek and been ac-
cepted.'' What was It'll" Just after
she had accepted him he asked II she
gave trading stamps."-Commercial
Progress.
Surly Strong-Gin me q nickel,
missus? Missus-I should think a big.
strong man like you would be ashamed
to ask for money. Surly Strong
am, missus, but 1 amt got der nerve
to take It without Observation-Disclosures
phia Record.
Dudley bought a horse the other
day --." Yes, and he was hor-
ribly stuck, wasn't he?" .Oh! you've
seer the horse then?' mo. but he
told me he was going to buy one from
a friend who is in the business.,"-
Philadelphia Press.
Bibliophile (aghast)-l beg your
pardon, madam, but that book your
little girl is playing with Is an old
md exceedingly rare first edition.
Caller-Oh, that's all right. Mr.. Vib-
bert. 1t will amuse her just as much
as If it were nice and new.-Chicago
Tribune.
did your bull terrier get a blue
ribbon at the show?" Yes" :
should think you would hang it up
in a prominent place." mo. You see,
this was a hair ribbon ne snatched
from a little girl, and we had to pay
her father not to make any trouble."
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Anything peculiar about these peo-
pie that have just moved into b
house next door to you. Mrs. Cross
way?' No; there's nothing unusual
about them. They've borrowed a step.
ladder and a tack-hammer, and turn
ed their children loose in our back
yard."-Chicago Tribune.