Bisbee daily review., 1907-01-15
steak is not necessarily made in Ham

steak IS not necessarily made Tn Ham burg. You see"-
 '1 don't see at all, sir. If buy q Paris hat for a Paris hat and find that it was made in Oshkosh they are go ing to hear from me. You admit, do you, that you swindled mel"
 My dear, dear Mrs. Bowser," re- piled the butcher, as his face length ensd. ''you came in here and'-
 You advised me to try hamburg CT steak. You gave me to understand that 1t was a steak prepared by a fat Dutch butcher in Hamburg, and that having tried one I would take no other. It turned out that the beef was killed in Chicago. You took old scraps of steak and chopped them up fine. MT. Bowser Is sitting chuckling at home. and I have got to go back and face him and admit that was In the wrong. He'll crow over me for the next twenty years, but I'll make you pay for 1t"
 knew how the thing would come out. Mrs. Bowser came in looking pale faced and mad, and when asked her what sort of a town Hamburg was she pretended not to hear me and feil into chair Ike a bag of sand, and remarked:
 "An express wagon brought a bundle here this afternoon. I suppose spme one has been working you for . sofi snap ngainT
 "It's simply a new patent fire escape my dear''
 ''whatI Another7 That makes about fifteen. MT. Bowser, it's a wonder that somebody doesn't coax the shoes of your feet. What on earth do we need 6 fire escape forT
 'To escape from the second story ir case there Is fire below"
 Nonsense! We have been keeping house over twenty years and never had a fire yet. It's no wonder the papers roast you the way they do. Fifteer different fire escapes in the last ter years, and not one of them good fol anything! It's a wonder somebod, don't come along to sell you balloons Fooled His Wife. whistled and patted the cat anC let Mrs Bowser have her say, but had a little job put up on her. A soon as she was asleep l slipped down 1 stairs with a handful of cotton battini and set 1t on fire in the hall. At tn same time I attached my fire escap | to one of the windows. I had hardl, got back into bed before she woke u ! and screamed at me: "Out of bed with you, MT. Bowser | The house is in fiamesr' | ''It can't ber' I replied.
 "But it isl The flames have alread. escape of yours. If it don't work VI shall both be roasted aliver
 It worked. I gave Mrs. Bowser tim to don a wrapper, and then I swuni | her into the seat and lowered away and down she went as soft as the fal of feather. Then I lowered mysel down, and as she was screaming fo the police I unlocked the front doc and trod out the smoldering fire. Sh followed me into the house and caugh on, and the look she gave me made m flesh crawl After sitting down fo five minutes she got over her frigh and said
 Suppose that newfangled thing ha not workedr'
 "But it did; it was warranted to-"
 'rBut If It had broken and let n downr'
 What Might Have Happened.
 You'd have broken both legs an probably all your ribs, and at thi moment you'd be in the hospital, an I'd be weeping over you"
 "And figuring on a second wife if died,"
 Naturally. When a man of my az is left a widower a second marriage inevitable. I should wait a year, c course, but after that
 We haven't spoken since. g around whistling and singing and nor and then dancing a few steps of jii but she is silent and preoccupied an now and then signs large sigh. It all right to say that Mrs. Bowser is fh better man of the two, but there ar occasions when she falls down an the man at the head of the house \ named SAMUEL BOWSER, ! lE O11od