Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1906-02-28
HIS DEFENSE.

"a NIL iOl 6iu LllIG1 (etpLolliS NtIc o1I
ting at table in the club.
See that old chap over there?" asked
the Major He's Gen. , retired, the
most conscientious old duff | ever knew.
Jove, | did see him tricked by a slick
scoundrel on a court martial once
whats the ya1n?" asked the junior
captain.
well" began the major, st came
about this way: There was captain in
my regiment whom we may call Breek,
and if ever there was Il scoundrel Breek
was it,
Every c.. O. he ever had tried to pinch
him on one count or another. but Breell
was as cute as he was crooked and mean.
He always pulled out on technicality Of
some SORT.
The old boy over there was in com
mand Of our department He hated Breek.
All of us hated Breek. So when Breell
was finally caught red handed, drunk and
raising Ned on the public streets, we re-
joiced clean through the department. 1t
was an open and shut case.
THE prosecution had no end of wit
nesses. Breek said he didn't even want
any counsel. He chose to defend himself.
The court martial was ordered and
convened Breek didn't object to any
body. The members rose to take the
oath. The judge advocate was just start
ING to swear them when Breek broke in:
q want to call the attention of the
president of the COURT he said, to the
fact that the collar of his blouse is un-
hooked. Officers sitting on a court mar
tial are supposed to be properly dressed.
The president, Il fat old colonel, Of
forty years service, glared fiercely at
Breek, but buttoned up his collar
The court was sworn. The first wit
ness was called. His testimony began
damning for Dree-,. The court couldn't
help feeling satisfied. Suddenly Breek
started again.
= wish to call the attention of the
court to the fact that Capt. Jones is
loumging on the table A member of a
court martial should maintain a military
and decent position
"Old Jones was too amazed to do more
than puff and blow. The impudence of
this scoundrel 1t all went on the record
too. He sat up in his chair, cherry col
ored with suppressed fury.
WITNESS after witness swore to the
disreputable and drunken conduct Of
Breek. Breek smilingly let them 90 with
out questioning them. Then the
last witness for the prosecution was
called
The reiterated testimony was too
much for the patience of the members of
the court, who began to let their thoughts
wander aimlessly. Breek's high cracked
voice rasped out sharply:
- Fhe nreSidant of this oo,,,,t ;c rooroc4
ed to call the attention of Mai. Stafford
to the fact that he is here to do his duty,
not to put in an hour day dreaming
"A gasp OF surprise ran through the
room. What was the idiot up to, any
how?
The Judge advocate wrote down the
last conclusive statement of the last wit
ness.
The prosecution he announced, here
rests
''Breek looked blinkingly at the presi-
dent
The defense, he said, desires to call
Col. Martin as a witness to character
The president gasped with amazement
He was duly sworn.
Col. Martini was the first question
Breek asked, are you my friend?
No, sir Numbered the indignant col
onel, smarting under the recent impudent
correction.
:" Do you consider me gentleman
81 do not, sir
Don't you think me fit to be an officer
of the army and to associate with other
officers of the army?'
Not by a great deal,' spluttered the
colonel honestly.
4" Did you feel this way before this trial
came up?'
81 always have
Then please tell the court your pre-
vious personal opinion of me-
L considered you a miserable imper-
tinent, dishonorable rascal sir
THAT VIII do said Breek; please call
Maj. Stafford
TO the amaZement Of the court the
same questions were asked of Stafford
with the same outcome. Then Capt. Jones
was called, and the scene was repeated
almost verbatim. A like result followed
the examination of four other members.
Then Breek announced that he had a
statement to submit. The dazzed court
waited for it dumbly.
That statement was a masterpiece
1t called the attention of the court and
the department commander to the fact
that in this trial clear majority of the
court had testified under oatn that they
had entered on their duties with bitter
hostile animus toward the accused
They had severally admitted that be-
fore any evidence was submitted they
were firmly convinced that he was unfit
for the army. Under such circumstances
a fair trial was impossible. He asked
that as a matter of justice the findings
of the court. if unfavorable to him, be
disapproyed.
''You never saw such a wrathy outfit
as that court was. Of course they found
him guilty and sentenced him to dis
missal. But the old man was so afraid
his own feelings might prejudice him that
on reading the proceedings, when he
struck the statement, he disapproved the
sentence, and Breek went scot free
New York Sun.
He Said Too Much
Tommy Mulligan of the seventh grade