New-York tribune., 1906-09-29
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

latest native papers from China say that the Dow
ager Empress much enraged at the suggestion
of the Duke Tsai-tseh that the pigtan should be
abolished. 'Why should II be?' because 1t is In
convenient for military men," But there
civilians we'll military; and, besides. even
military men can coil the pigtail on the back of
the mead when active service" AS the duke
persisted in advising the abolition of the pigtal
the Empress grew very angry, and all the enorts
of Prince King were necessary in order to mollify
her.
night writes a correspondent oyer the problem
room fires before October. have always been I'M
pressed by the uniformity of the system At the
the the weather We nave done our duty the COM
panies appear TO reflect and If the weather is frae-
questioned was much of the same mind They've
allus lit eTn them and they a4s @ Will TL eTs tRe @
are as 1t is" and he turned to answer three Old
Country al conservatism in this matter is even
stronger As soon as It gets dark at o'clock fires
fTs m hsan @ fs %Roud think
to sybaritism to light room 1Fe re- m sfRtem0er aEs
unwingness to disturb the settled order in obedi-
member once visiting the house of old couple
in Scotland It was about o'clock on a late
there no light. With some difficulty diseoy-
eTo6 eToo my 1g no the hoor Tet one explained Ito
be fashin' WI the gas"-Manchester Guardian.
A Coolidge dispatch to "The Atchison Globe
saws: The meanest man in Coolidge is running
for office and the next meanest man in town is
working for him Voters from the Indian Terri
tory are being imported vote against the candi-
date: II is not considered that the population of
Coolidge is great enough properly to rebuke him"
Who's that man who tried to avoid you and
That's one of the deacons in our church"
No but / ran across him in Paris couple of
times" s."-Cleveand Leader
Connecticut newspaper editor once hired an
Enslishman as a reporter. and gave him his
first assignment a big fire in nearby town Arriv-
ing at the place. the reporter found great masses
of flames pouring from the huge factory building.
He seemed nonpussed and didn't know what to
do Finally he sent back to the office this tele-
gram Have arrived and the fire is burning fierce
ly What shall I do?'
OF course he was sent to write up the fire. but
II was now late for the afternoon edition, the
editor said something under his breath. and sent
back the following reply: Find out where the fire
is the hottest and jump in
Finished Product.-Mrs. Upmore cat bench show
ond rernIsiva crea+ure Won ever saw
Mr.. Upmore dog fancier)-You bet he isl He's
beauty.-Chicago Tribune
1t is Fashionable among Europeans TO spend the
summer in Norway. 1t has fine cool climate. with
long days. The salmon rivers strictly pre-
served. Some of the salmon rivers very fine
and rent for as much as 5000 year. IT know
man who has river only two miles long that he
pays 81 500 for says traveller. He often gets
fish of sixty seventy pounds The day I called
on him last year his wife came in with 4O-pound-
er a 22-pounder and 5l-pounde- that she had
caught herself within three hours"
The Lid.-Iohnne- "a. who was Pandora?
Johnnies PaLPandora my son, was a little girl
the lid dOwn.-Prtnceton Tiger.
A college professor tells of a young student who
failed in his examinations and was conditioned. II
appears that his family anxious about the
outcome of the examinations and teegraphed him
for particulars. He replied TO his father as fol-
lows:
Exams splendid. Professors enthusiastic. They
wish for a second in October"
DON'T READ THIS
more D. o are read because people are warned not 70
read because they possess literary meritFital
And fingers tugglng at my hair.
| think and think and think
But settle into dun despair
And decorate my study chair
With ink
1t can't he done, l advertise
And the public with a prize
To stimulate its greed;
ape the clever, quote the wise
But cannot give the people eyes
TO read.
Say. would the reader shirk me less
If my initials 1 suppress
Or use a pseUdonyme?
Or needs my thought Il finer dress
To hide its utter worthessness
From htmf
Why not a warming? Why indeed?
You are requested not TO read"
TN, Ware are Jokes, or Hold r11e enough dsr.
All! that would make the public heed
My stuff! ,,