Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1906-01-31

excitement OF deliveryy merely strikes
the speaker en- his bald head. Watch
eagerly, Diliy, how gracefully thu
Iowa expert replies with sarcastic
copy of the Holy Writ, and then ira-
agine, if you can, the mad cheers from
the rest of the chamber as the rstorts
follow each other thick and fast, while
ambulances drive. modestly up to the
door Of the east wing > -, f.
eve should be proud Of our senate.
my dear nephew, for nowhere in this
fair world is so much action and COM
mon sense crowded into such small
space as at Washington. Titled for
eigners have visited our senate cham
Der, and have, come away with tears
in their eyes-caused by chair splin-
tiers or bits of pay dirt that rose into
the gallery. They have expressed their
keen appreciation of what they saw
when they returned to their own coun-
try, and we to-day occupy an enviable
position as possessing the best all
around champion, fighting collection
Of political highbinders among the
concert of nations"
but are there not dull moments in
the senate, dear uncle?" asked little
billy, with some anxiety.
II regret to say there are" sighed
Uncle George Occasionally a meas
ure is, introduced in which no one has
an interest, and the scene is common
place. No marked money, no personal
encounters, no bad language, and an
air OF somnolence, but luckily these
are infrequent. Occasionally, when
matters pail, Mr.. Rockefeller will send
each senator a message of good cheer.
Unfortunately, one or two Of these
messages became public. One received
by model of senatorial courtesy read:
"'Dear Senator: How are things?
Did you get the last bundle due you?
It's beautiful afternoon. Don't for
get to kill those few bills aimed
against me. You'll get yours at the
usual place. Yours, JOHN
'The base press on the last known
occasion procured one of these simple
and homely messages, and it was scat
tered broadcast throughout the land,
with much vile comment, but beyond
these small matters mention, billy,
there has never been word breathed
against the dishonesty of senator
We can look with pride on our law
makers, my boy, for they'll never do
us injury, unless there's dollar in it
for them"
But do not the people elect their
senators, dear uncle?" asked little
Dilly.
"Ah, my dear lad, that is a pleasant
little fiction that serves to amuse the
young" replied Uncle George, geni-
ally. 1T is not quite true, however.
The philanthropic railroads and the
other friends of the people, elect the
senator's to their high Office. Some day
perhaps they will be elected directly
by the masses, and then the disgrace
Of partial national honesty will be
heaped upon our devoted nation, but
the day l fear is far distant. 1t is a
matter of much moment, billy, that
the people shall have ample representa-
ton, but just now they seem to have
too much"
"Was there never an honest senator,
uqcle,?" asked little billy.
"Once there was, billy. He did not
remain long in his place, however. He
was unseated by his indignant fei-
lows when they found he would not
take his roll from the basket as it was
passed through the chamber by naive
and smiling gentlemen. I believe he
died in an asylum. His friends have
said it was pitiful to hear him plead
for another chance in his mad deli
rium.''
HAS the senate q coat-of-arms,
uncle?" asked billy.
eyes, my boy. 1t is dough bag
rampant, on a field pure white. Crest,
a mitt grasping with a gules man
datory. Motto: Money First +
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