davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-07-14

Or. Inswim-Congratula me- My
practice is increasing so that 1 really
can't attend to it,
Miss Quizzer-How nice, l congrat-
ulate both yourself and patients.-Chi-
cago Daily News.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-07-14
A Difference.

DEMONSTRATING does make a diff
ference, after all.
Egbert-How so?
Before a man marries, when he
hears his sweetheart say: Dos 'uvy
duvy is oo?' he thinks she's all to the
good"
"Of course"
"But after marriage, when he hears
the same girl make the same remark
to the baby, he calls it 'tommyrot,'
you know."-Yonkers Statesman.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-07-14

Wandering William don't know
where my next meal is coming FROM
lady.
Lady-wen. know where it is not
coming from.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-07-14

STUCK.
Cogger-Up to the hubs, Ell, and
have telephoned for team of mules
to pull you out?
Motorman-Yes. If ever get this
auto out 1 shall offer it to the harbor
dredgers.
Cogger-What. in the world use
would it be to them?
ACCOUNTABILITY it is such perfect
mud machinei-Chicag Daily News.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-07-14

Rare Treat.
Some great physician tells US"
said the woman in the green waist.
that eating beef puts a person in a
bad humor. Does it put your hus-
band in a bad humor?"
81 should say not" sighed the little
woman with the typewriter ink on
her fingers. my husband is a poet,
and he is so tickled when we can af-
ford real beef that he is in a good
humor for a whole week. "-Chicago
Daily News.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-07-14

hero, would have remembered stronger
evidence N his favor had it been nee
eSSary
The news-democrat. (Providence, R.I.) 1906-1909, 1906-07-06
SUDDEN DEATHS.

Two young children died very suddenly
yesterday and the cause In each case
was given as acute indigestion one OF
the decedents was Margaret, the 4-year-
old daughter OF Mrs Ellen (McGuinness)
Nelson, who died at the home of her
mother In the rear of Spencer street.
The other was an infant child living on
Water street. Medical Examiner French
was called in each case and stated that
death was due to natural causes
The news-democrat. (Providence, R.I.) 1906-1909, 1906-07-06
PAwTUCKET OFFICE.
Thu Nj WS-DEMOCRA
No. 4 Kinyon Block.
Tel. 279-L.
FOR TIRED EYES.

There is something infinitely soothina
in this when rightly applied. All that Is
needed Is the power OF using the fingers
with infinite gentleness The lids are
closed, and the "masseur' using two or
law the lashcs. from the inner corner Of
the eye outwards The movement may
be followed 10y strokes over each eye
brow
The news-democrat. (Providence, R.I.) 1906-1909, 1906-07-06

Thomas S. Cook and Howard H. Ar
mour. two small boys. were riding a bicy-
Gle on Prospect street this morning when
the machine got beyond control.
IL ran into an electric car and both
boys were thrown TO the ground The
Cook lad sustained fractures of the ribs
but his companion escaped with slight
bruises. They were both attended by
DIR. French
The news-democrat. (Providence, R.I.) 1906-1909, 1906-07-06
FAVORS PUBLICITY.

Consider the hen. She is in favor OF
the widest publicity as to the date on
which her product is placed 'on the mar
ket In fact. she announces it to all the
world in a loud tone of voice.-Chicago
Tribune.
The news-democrat. (Providence, R.I.) 1906-1909, 1906-07-06
WILL SAVE ARM.

Inuqiry at the Rhode Island hospital
brings the information that william
Morse. the man who was injured by be-
ing thrown from a heavily loaded tip
cart at the corner OF North Union and
Broad streets, Tuesday afternoon is get
ting along very satisfactorily and that
unless something unexpected occurs his
arm will be saved. IL was at first believed
that this member would have To be am
putated, but now IL Is thought that In
time he will have the fun use of It.
The news-democrat. (Providence, R.I.) 1906-1909, 1906-07-06
GOOD SUGGESTION

II might be well also TO require the
manufacturers - pure olive oil to put
on labels telling the year in whIch the
cotton seed was grown kansas City
journal
The news-democrat. (Providence, R.I.) 1906-1909, 1906-07-06
UNPOPULAR COLLECTIONS

Nobody wants the kann collection of
pictures at $4,000. 600 The Chicago pack
ers also possess can collection in the
meat line which nobody appears to want
Philadelphia Press
The news-democrat. (Providence, R.I.) 1906-1909, 1906-07-06
GOES TO JAIL.

Joseph charotte was before Judge Tuck
In the district court this morning charged
with an assault on his wife. The AFFAIR
was somewhat aggravated. and the man
failed tot give any special reason for his
brutality, 80 the court concluded to give
The news-democrat. (Providence, R.I.) 1906-1909, 1906-07-06

0t"~e
the German to
nc
ia e. a n o de a : o
n Eurpcand lie O he ance
the head o German i'll
Joslhs trusted ads mdn nowF Premier
The news-democrat. (Providence, R.I.) 1906-1909, 1906-07-06
OFFICERS INSTALLED.

the overseer of the poor to procure mark
ers for the graves.
OFFICERS INSTALLED.
The recently elected officers OF Enter
prise Lodge. l. O. O. f.. Nj. L., were
installed last evening. the installing Of
fcer being Deputy Levy Riley. The list
OF officers is as follows: Grand master
Joseph Parkinson noble grand, John
manent secretary, Alfred j. Andrew
treasurer. John L. Aspen: elective secre-
tary. George Legge; conductor. Thomas
Miller right support TO noble grand
Charles II. Pollitt: left support To noble
grand. James Stansfield right support to
vice grand. James Broadbent: left sup
port TO vice grand, Thomas Turner; scene
supporters, Hugh j. Gray and George
Ingham; inside guard Frank Miller; out
side guard. William Loynds.
Several visitors were present al the
meeting. and after the regular business
had been transacted there was "A season
of speechmaking and social hour was
spent.
MARRIED AT HOME.
Ray F. Knowlton Of sutton n II. and
Miss Eva May the eldest daughter Of
William Giles. &c John street Valley
Falls, were united I'm marriage at the
home of the brides parents on TUESDAY
evening. The ceremony was performed
by Rev. f. T. Whitman. pastor of the
Valley Falls Baptist church. Miss Flor
bridesmaid, and her brother, William
Giles. Jr.. was the best man After re-
ceiving the congratulations of the guests
The news-democrat. (Providence, R.I.) 1906-1909, 1906-07-06

| in the town and II was voted to instruct
the overseer OF the poor TO procure mark
ers for the graves.
The news-democrat. (Providence, R.I.) 1906-1909, 1906-07-06
READY FOR BUSINESS.

The board OF tax assessors is getting
ready for the business OF raising funds
TO carry 'on the affairs OF the town for
another year. Yesterday forenoon the
members of the board met at the town
hall and talked over a few preliminary
matters and later they paid a visit to
one or two pieces Of property where inn
portant Improvements have been made
during the past year. On Monday, Tues
day and Wednesday OF next week they
will be at the town hall for the purpose
OF meeting any taxpayers who care to
call upon them and after that the work
of making up the tax levy will go on as
rapidly as possible until 1t is completed.
The news-democrat. (Providence, R.I.) 1906-1909, 1906-07-06

the couple left on a wedding trip. which
will be spent in New Hampshire, after
which they will take up their residence
in Philadelphia. where the groom has
been engaged as teacher of Greek and
Latin in the Episcopal academy. Mr..
Knowlton Is a graduate of Brown uni
yersity OF the class of '02.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02
In,tin,, In Itird..

In the stormy part of the year n
steamer encountered rough weather,
and rs often happens ut such times,
many sea- pulls lowered near the ship
and even came ON board. one allowed
Itself 10 be caught aud 1t WAS found
that II had fish bone stuck In the eye
In such a position as not absolutely 10
destroy the sight. but penetrating an
Inch into the flesh of the bird and pro
jectng an inch and half 1t might
have had fight with fish or got
traushxed seeking Its prey. The doe
tor of the ship took the bird. extracted
the bone, applied n soothing remedy To
the wound aud let II go. 1t flew away,
but returned the next day. allowing II
SELF 70 Ice caught, The doctor exam
lned the wound. which MAS progressing
tavorably. applied more of the remedy
and let the bird so II second time. 1t
dew several times around the ship and
then departed aud returned no more
London Sketch
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02
SGQrC4 sUPsRsTfrloNs.
FArt.sas aeth1as East wsrs Adopted
"a ,aaaaess aaa p~ath.

f4Etaas Methods Faat " scs Adopted
"a sassasss aad DEATH
n-chod much IL vogue II Scotland
az 0ne time ot aseertaining whether
sickness would prove fatal WAS 10 dig
two holes u the ground one called the
quick grave the other the dead hole.
The sufferer was then placed between
the two aud the hole toward which he
turned Indicated what would be the
outcune OF his malady. Sometimes
piece Of rock Was broken over the head
OF a person whose last agonies were
painful ulike to himself aud to those
who witnessed them IL was believed
that the heart or the sick man would
thus be broken and his release hasten
ed Windows and doors are always
thrown wide open in order that the de
parting spirit may have free egress
from the house and escape from the
evil ones that hover around eager to
lnthrail his soul
During the interval between death
and burial hens and eats were kept
carefully shut up \ person meeting
these hnimais al such II juncture was
doomed to blindness III the future.
Moreover. unless Il stream divided the
two houses, farmers frequently refrain
ed from yoking their oxen OF horses be
fore the body waI laid under the turf
or truth" Many women preserved,
with the greatest reverence, their
brutal attire TO cover them la the cot
nm Bread aud wuter We're placed lii
the chamber OF death, for during the
night prior 10 the burial the spirit of
the departed one came To partake OF
them. stubborn children and little ones
who had not been blessed 10y the min
lister were buried before sunrise. In
this way their admission to the land OF
promise was assured Not 10 observe
the practice was to destlne the souls Of
these BARNS To wander homeless and
| diSconsolate
The fate OF the suicide Is iamentabe
Ills body eanu0t rest in the klrkyard,
for II would tnint the souls of those
who He therein, Frequently he was
buried In lone dixie which separated
two lalrds' estates. and passersby were
expected 10 east a pebble at the rude
stone which marked the place.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02
NAV e. 1906.
MANS WEAKER HALF.
ona Side of IIIs BODY Always Stronger
Than the other.

enA Side of Ills Body Always stronger
Than the other.
Tie popular belief is that the left
side Is weaker than the right, and. as
In all popular beliefs, there Is much
truth ia this In most cases, says the
Grand Magazine. the right arm Is de
cidedly stronger than the left. the
bones are larger aud the muscles more
vigorous
When We cume 10 consider the lower
limbs. however. We mud precisely op-
posite state or affairs the lett leg -
stronger than the right ID ne great
ma jUrity Of cases. It's want 0t SYN
metry > noticeable all through me
body Mite tmes oat w tsn We see
better with One eye 1hau VIM ne Jth-
er and hear better WtJh lle let 5nuu
with the right eur VI gtre gefsa.
Not only So N injury ~ ne DOdy 4
buru gr cut. r9r Instance eaases
more pam GA gne side tbaH r would
were 1t Inflicted GA the 5lnee hVea
diseases attack one SIDE 9n their 1rSt
onset in preference 10 the olner Eczs-
ma, ydrlcose VEINS. scIAtiea aud 81 81
tuberculosis begin Invariably 70 mAAI
fest themselves Gu our weaker side.
A blistering plaster. too, viii provoke
an eruption only II applied 70 tie right
side in certain individuals II others
only if applied TO the left side
The simplest way apparently. OF dis
covering which is our weaker side Is 10
observe which side We lie upon by
preference When In bed. as II Is Ger
tain that We will instinctiYely adopt
the attitude which Is most agreeable,
or, rather, which Causes the least In
convenience. In other words. We will
lie upon the side the muscles Of which
being more vigorous are less sensible
To the pressure upon them Of the
weight OF HE body.
Statistics and observe alton 20 To prove
that In about three cases out of four
il Is the left side which Is the weaker
thus giving reason 10 Tire popular die
tum CnriUusly enough, however. pneu
monia, II has been noticed, unlike most
diseases. usually attacks at first the
right that IL 10 say. the stronger side
of the body
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02

Sneezing itself is a reflex nervous ac-
uon ami Is brought about by mechani-
cal irritation to the ends of the nerve
tbers which occur in the tissue OF the
nose. When this irritation occurs,
whether ii be due TO a foreign body or
change or temperature affecting the
tissue OF the nose, a nerve impulse Is
transmitted TO the brain, and certain
nerve centers In the medulla oblongata
are affected. This results In certain
impulses being transmitted along the
nerves to the muscles controlling respi-
ration. BY this means the egress of air
during expiration is delayed. and the
various exits are closed When the
pressure, however. reaches limit the
exits are forced open, "a powerful blast
OF air Il expelled and the patient
sneeYeS"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02
Death of Man Who Planted Swamp Angel
Battery.

The career of Brigadier-General Ed
ward Wellman Serrell, u. s. A. retir-
ed, who died the other night in a SAM
tarium above New York city, reads Ike
a page from the Arabian Nights In
his four score and eight years of lite,
cold Shovels, as he was known
throughout the Army of the Potomac
during the civil war, three times re
ceived the thanks of Congress, while
his achievements would fill a dozen
volumes.
So far as Trenton IS concerned his
most interesting work was his connec-
ton with the "Swamp Angel" battery,
of which the gun mounted ut the cor
ner of Perry and Clinton streets is re
miniscent. When the war broke ont
Serrell organized the first regiment Of
volunteer engineers, and at its head
figured in I26 engagements. 1t was
during 1903, about Charleston, that
Gen. Serrell performed the sensational
work of placing the famous Swamp
Angel battery 'lhis was most aw-
ful swamp, aud in twenty feet OF mud
ne SCI i foundation on which was plac-
Ell a 80 pound Parrott gun 10 bonn
bard the CITY.
ne tvl5 also who devised hlrber
leicnse ,eheme dunng the Spanish wa
whereby ne exact position OF a ship
nighl Ie .ucaicl.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02
N.rbal Chtropody

Tue pastor. who was calling upon
member OF his congregation. asked the
name of the sprightly little daughter
attention.
I'VE call her Ella" said the little
girls mother.
THAT is a good name, Mrs. Donley,"
remarked the minister. 1T has been
made classic by Charles Lamb"
"Well, TO tell the truth" explained
Mrs Donley her name is Cornelia,
but it's easier To call her Ella"
Il see" he rejoined. And she prob
ably likes 1t better. 1t Is painless
extraction OF a Corn"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.

There's a lol of fOolishuess 10 keep
out of
Genius IS not rare, but plain com
mon sense ia
Great things can't be very difficult
OF an ordinary man couldn't accom-
plsti them
livery one naturally dislikes those
people who are 10 good they suggest
the top line in II copy book.
he content With your air castle. The
chimney In nm air castle never smokes,
and the Windows do not rattle IA every
wind
Doing business without advertising
is like winklng at II girl In the dark -
YEA know what YOU are doing, but no
body else does.
Perhaps you have noticed that chill
dren are mere willing to work for the
ueighbors than at home; also that some
Of them never outgrow the habit -
AtchiSon Globe.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02
A BIRD OF GUIANA.
IL Can speak Every Language That
Ii once Hears.

II Can speak Every Language That
Ii once Hears.
There Is II bird Of Guiana which de
serves 10 he widely known, THIS IL
the "tion ton pronounced tee-yawn
lee. yawnl nn account of its cry. This
bird Is valued by the natives for It's
brilliant plumage especially the tall
feathers, which they wear In their
headdress and make clothing OF, but
the most Interesting characteristic Of
this strange bird Is its Initiative fac
ulty.
A naturalist became acquainted with
the birds powers In II curious man
uer lie was awakened from his sleep
Que night by hearing cries of distress
In French Some one was being muir
dered not far away, so much was alb.
solulely certain. There We're cries for
mercy aud help, uttered In excellent
French, shrieks Of agony and groans.
Jumping to his feet he awoke his In
dian guides. saying that they must MI
20 To the assistance OF the victim, At
that moment the voice uttered shout
OF ironical laughter followed by "tion-
tlon." and the guides turned over, with
grunt Of VeXation The learned natu
ralst had great deal 10 learn. they
remarked sareastlcally.
The tian tion Is the worst of chatter
boxes. II can. and does, Initiate every
sound II hears. with the utmost tdellty.
1t eau speak all languages. giving the
proper accent and intonation. This Is
II strong statement, but II Is correct, II
VIII shout for assistance In the best
English or German, and you Will really
believe that some fellow countryman
is In dire distress until the bird inter
rupts It's own pleadings with derisiN =
laugh Then YOU feel like one who has
been the victim OF Il list OF April joke,
If the bird could be caught aud So far
domesticated ms 10 be happy In con
flnement the parrot would go out or
fashion ms home pet
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02
DR.. DAVID KENNEDYS
FAV0RITE REMEDY

Although diahe1rtened, he bought a boIFIe
of it, and within IL month had experienced
beneficial results, and before he had finished
the third bottle, the gravel was completely
dissolved aud hs sufferings at an end.
Mr.. NELL feels that he owesa lasting debt
of gratitude to DIR. Kennedy's Fayorite
Remedy, madeat Rondout, N and fordis-
orders OF the bladder and urinary organs He
says: "it will effect "A cute if oneis possible"
Fayorite Remedy is prescribed with I'M
falling success for rheumatism, dyspepsia
constipation and nerve troubles in which II
has cured many that We're considered be-
yond the aid Of medicine All druggists u.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02

The nth monarchy men formed a re-
liaous sect that sprang up In the days
OF Charles l. OF England. They We're
~ called from the fact that they as
serted that 10 III. last days the four an
dent mOnsrchies. the Assyrian, the
Pa.ian, the Babylonnn and the Ro-
nan. would be restored, and to them
roslid bs sddsd q Christian monarchy,
og af;h usDnzrefy. " which Christ
- ssl5 10 ne kf8z
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02

You have often seen them pith
pale faces poor appetite. head and
back ache, symptoms cOranon II The
sex. Fathers and mothers lose M
time in securing DR.. Ksnnsdys
Fayorite Remedy. 1t will eosi Yoa
S1.00 and is much cheaper than siek-
ness. Write to DIR. David Ksnnsdvs
Sons, Rondout, n. Y, for a free sas4.
pie bottle.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02
Tho GnIdcn MAGNET.

"a pretty girl. even II she is poor.
can have all the attention she wants,
can't shef"
Eyes. There is only one that can
beat her
"Who's thatf"
"A hom.iy girl with tue coin DE
troit Free ifess
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02
<ot So Terrible

Physician You lie awake In bed
three or four hours every night? That
is bad, l shall have to treat YOU for
chronic insomnia Caller (whose salary
IS Sl4 a week. Er no, doctor l don't
think it's "a bad as that. | simply can't
sleep
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02
!, n. ,,.d s,o 600 600

Rogers once walked into the hut Of
Ned IIasllins, who lived the life OF a
semihermit in a hut eight feet square
close to Fort phenix in Fairhaven,
Mass, where Mr.. Rogers summer
house stands now
NED, what would you do II yon had
S1o,oo0o00f' asked Rogers.
"By jines." said the hermit after long
cogitation. I'd have this hut built two
feet larger Il IL. Mufray's Henry
II. Rogers" ia Human Life.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02
GRAVEL CURED


A healtIisr, heartier, happier man than
John ]. Nan, of 2437 North 8th St, Phila-
delphia. could not be found in days search.
The fact that he Is still alive is a constant
wonder h. hi3 friends.
Several years ago he began to suffer in
describabl,. miseries from stone in the blad-
der. An "a ient physician in Philadelphia
told him T. Il surgical operation was nee
essary. So much did he dread the result,
for if unsuccessful it meant death, that he
put off the evil day as long as possible.
Mhile in thia frame OF mind, he heard OF
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02
Common Council.

Anadiourued meeting of the Common Coun-
Gil of the City OF l.ambertville will be held in
the Council Room, Masonic Hall, ON MON
DAY EVENING, MAY :, 1905, at 500 O'Clock.
JAMES II REYNOLDS, City Clerk.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02
INTERESTING
INTERESTING
lNsTRuCTWE
Correct English,
How to use it."
A MONTHLY MAGAZINE DE OTrD TO
THE USE OF ENGLISH.
JOSEPHINE TUReK BAKER. Enroa.


tiaf thAs
Course in English for the Beginner.
Course in English for the Advanced
Pupil.
How 10 Increase Ones Vocabulary
The Art of Conversation.
Should and Would: How to use Them.
Pronuneiations Century Dictionary
Correct English in the Home
Correct English in the School.
What 10 Say and What Not to Say.
Course in Letter Writing and Punctn
alton.
Alphabetlc list of Authorizations.
Business Englsh for the Business Man,
Compound Words. How to Write
Them.
Studies in English Literature.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02

Sarcasm IL Eeeu weapon. but in
handling q msag people take hold Of
the blade instead " The bapdr=.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02
ANNUAL MEETING.

The annual meeting of the Lot owners of
Mt Hope Cemetery Association, will be held
at the residence of Chas, A. Skillman, No II
" Main street Monday May eth, 1905, at 7S0
+ NJ to elect Managers and transact such
other business as may come before the Board.
By order
H. NJ DILTS,
April e, 06-2t Secretary.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1906-05-02
In Chancery of New Jersey


BY virtue of an order of the Court OF Chan
Gerry of New Jersey, made on the day of the
date hereof, in a cause wherein Cornela $.
Morris and Fila h. Brewer executives of Peter
Brewer, deceased, are compliments and you
and others are defendants You are required to
appear, plead answer or demur to the bill of
lid complainant ON or before the twenty
fifth day of April next, or said bill will be
taken as confessed against You.
The said bill is filed to foreclose a certain
mortgage made by you and others TO Peter
Brewer dated July sixth, eighteen hundred
and eiehty-seyen, upon lands in the village of
Pennington, county of Hunterdon and state of
New Jersey, and YOU, Abraham 5. Brewer,
are made defendant because YOU signed
and executed the said mortgage and are one
of the owners of the premises described in the
same as set forth in the compliments bill OF
complaint.
Dated February twenty-third, Nineteen
hundred and six.
WALTER f HAyHURsr,
Solicitor of Compliments
liambertville, Y H.