The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1906-11-04

him facetiously Il say, Count, if you
were to choose an American bride, what
style would appeal 10 you, a girl with
brown eyes and brown hair, a girl with
black hair ana gray eyes. or a girl with
red hair and blue eyes?"
THE count thought for a minute,
! shrugged his shoulders, and answered
lndlfferently: All monsieur, I care not
so much for re color of re eye or re
color of re hair, so long as she have
re green back"
At the Lambs club one afternoon
some one, complimenting Henry Bios
som on the hit of The Red Mill" the
new Blossom-Herbert musical comedy
with which Montgomery and Stone are
doing so well-Blossom's fourth sue
cess by the way-asked the author if he
believed in the existence of the quail
lty commonly called genius
Genius" answered Blossom, us a bit
of beeswax, stuck fast between the seat
of cnair and one's-er-overaIls until
bis work is done!"
q
Cotton Maynard, an instructor irr En-
glish at Cheshire academy, Cheshire.
Conn, has been in the habit for some
time of asking the boys in his Shake
Spedre class TO give appropriate titles
for the scenes in different plays. The
other day, after reading 1.-The Merchant
of Venice he asked one of the BOYS
TO suggest a good title for the scene
where Jessica steals away from her
fathers house with Lorenzo. The bow
showed his familiarity with melodrama.
if not with Shakespeare, by answering
quickly, mo mother to guide her.
- ,ss----e@
FRITZ Scheff doesn't want any more
of grand opera. A Berlin impresario,
during the prima donna's trip abroad
last summer, tried to engage her for
between seasons continental tour.
No more grand opera for me-" re-
piled the singer; there's nothing Ike
singing in comic opera, especially In
America Comic opera audiences laugh
so-why, it's like telling a funny story
to some one who owes you money!"
-
Willis Kiss is being tried out as a
chorus man in My Ladys Maid in
New York Willie's definition of love
is as follows:
BuSs-A kiss.
Rebus-TO kiss again.
Pluribus-To kiss many times
Syllabus-To kiss a homely girl.
Blunderbus-To kiss the wrong per-
son.
Omnibus-To kiss everybody.
EreDuS-IO KISS In the dark.
~
Leo DitriChstein is a believer in the
theory that men are creatures of en-
vironment and imagination, and tells
the following story in support of his
idea:
It's only four weeks since 1 was
standing at the entrance to an elevator
on the ground floor of a hotel In Buffalo
when a cOnvivial but unfortunate Thes-
plan whom L formerly knew attracted
my attention. With emotional Specu-
latfon begot by long-continued thirst,
he was anXiously watching a waiter
who was bearing alOft bottle of cham
payne and two classes.
N.Y. said he, L see 'em now sittin'
on opposite sides of the table, each one
of EN- slipping the bubbles. pledging
each others health and thinkin' about
another bottle
Presently" continued Mr.. Ditrich-
stein, 1.-The same waiter started for the
elevator again, this time having on his
tray two bottles and two glasses. The
eyes of the impecunious and thirsty
one fairly glistened.
There they go againr ne murmured
in ecstacy. Two folks and two bots, I |
can just see 'em, shaking hands with
each other ard getting rich. Why, this |
does me almost as much good as If / |
was thLre.'
"a brief interval, and then for the
third time the servitor is waited up- |
ward, and nov he has three bottles and
still but brace of goblets. The Thes-
plan began to reel.
Hurray!' he yelled-'its all off for
'em, it's all off for everybody They're
singin' and dancin', and in a little
while they'll be givin' away libraries
and establishin' homes Everybodys
rich now and he started for the ele-
vator
Why, where're you going, old man.
I asked, as l touched him on the Shout
der.
"'Ohl goin' upstairs, hic-goin' up
stairs to sleep it OFF,"
x X
Katie Barry, who plays the title role
in 'Mamselle Sallie," though an En-
glish woman, appreciates the English
sense OF humor. AS she describes II.
IAN Englishman is a paradox when il
comes to humor, for he is the only per-
son in the world who can see point
when there is none and fail TO see one
when it is evident"
In this connection she tells story Cd
an English performer Of minor grade
who came to this country a couple Of
seasons ago to appear in vaudeville
Knowing him on the other side, she
went to his opening the first night 10
give him word Of cheer and welcome
Owing to the novelty of his act, more
than to his personal merit he made IN
hit and at the conclusion of
his sketch was given a curtain call 7,
Standing by the prosce-lium arch, q