The Kemper herald. (Scooba, Miss.) 1875-1908, 1906-09-20
TOOK A BEAR BACK RIDE
DEACON WARNER ASTRADDLE
RRUIN ADDED VASTLY TO
MERRiMENT.

Old Enemy and the Whole Village
Had a Good Laugh.
The Chittenden, (Vt.) correspondent
of the New York World writes:
Goodness gracious, bub, what on
airth be We a-tryin' to do" exclaimed
Uncle Ben Morse when a giant hre-
cracker, exploding beneath his chair
on the stoop of the general store
awoke him from an afternoon nap with
nerve-wracking suddeness just as three
small culprits giggled their way to
cover behind Sim Jones's oxcart.
"Thunderation! We nights well XIII
a man to sheer him t death-an'
lust as I was dreamin' of lookin' right
into the berril o. the enemy's Gamer
to the second battle O. Bull Run
"Sho, uncle, what in time dye ex-
pect If we go to roost on the glorious
Fourth, jest like an owl, when yea
orter be out with the boys, bangin'
away with your blunderbuss," laughed
Sim, who had been drawn to the door
by the explosion.
oval wal, so it's the Fourth, now l
come to think ont" admitted Uncle
Ben somewhat notified. An l dunno
but what / should ha' done the same
thing when I was a young 'un. They
do tell that I was a regular cut-up, but
land sakes an all, I want half so bad's
them Twombley Twins. Say, Sim, did
We ever hear your father tell how them
twins come it over Deacon Eph War
ner hack in 1892"
Sim hadn't heard. OF if he had he
pretended he hadn't, and when Uncle
Ben made sure that no more disturb
ing crackers lurked in his vicinity he
kicked back in his chair and let go OF
the yarn while the aggregation camp
ed about in easy positions.
SIN those days we didn't have no
such things as hifalutin 1recrackers
to set We on aidge an burn holes In
your pants" began the veteran, but
the young fry made jest as much noise
as they don ow, and l dunno but more.
We ulster make out o hickry
lawgs and bind them with wire and
hoops from hawgsheads, and when one
on 'em busted some one most allus
lost a laig or an arm or leastwise a
finger.
"At the time Pm tellin' about the
Twombley twins had rugged up an oil
buster and all the boys and some +
the folks had Clipped in and bought
enough powder to blow a hole clean
through OF Fort Ticonderouge. They
was a-goin' to set her off on the village
common, but Deacon Warner, who
hated them twins like he hated pizen
because they was allus playin' tricks
on him, set his foot down. You'll haf-
ter gwup the mountain if We wan to
do any shooting says he, for I'm con-
stable and | won't have it round the
| village
1.-THE deacon was the a~ll-firedest con-
trary cuss We ever see when he got h1s
| mind made up to anythin', and though
some O the neighbors spoke up for
| the twins Eph stuck by his colors and
got real het up over the racket.
| You're a mess f doduks, the whole
b'ilin O. ye,' says he, AN l guess I'll go
| along myself an see that ye don't
break no laws ner ordinances. Ye
never can tell what them pesky
| twins'l do next, consarn EN-
oval, when the twins heard that
the deacon was a-goin' along the be-
gun to smoker an laugh 'emselves in
side out. Bud Twombley allowed that
if the OF man was goin' to set in Judg-
ment on the firm of the cannon er
show EN- how to celebrate the Glori-
GUS Fourth an south, he'd give him a
mighty %interestin' time. So he sot out
up the mountain and come back
till dark. When he did get home he
| and his brother Hank laughed most all
night and next mornin' got terrible
busy luggin' the amer to Thomp-
| sons Gorge, three miles above the vii
lage.
at seemed a strange place to cele-
brate, but the twins owned the gun
and there want no other way out of
it. So when it com along 10 o'clock
the night b'fore the Fourth, about
thutty of 'em, includin' the deacon,
took up the trail. They found the
cannern sot with it's muzzle pintin' in
to the mouth of al OF cave, jest below
which was a pond of the meanest
stickiest muck We ever saw. All along
the cliff, which formed one side f the
gorge, were other caves, and the twins
allowed that as the was dan
.gerous every man he'd better get in a
hole when she went off.
Most O. the holes were s. small We
had to lie down in 'em, but n was
big enough t stand in, and the deacon
spoke up for it. Sims father ruther
wanted it. but the twins showed him
away, and the deacon was soon stand
in right in the mouth with his laigs
spread wide apart and his mouth open.
This 'ere's tn way t fix yerself so't
We won't git deef,' says he. That's
the way they do to June trainin'.
"They looked turrible queer in the
moonlight with their mouths open an
their fingers stuck in their ears, and
/ thought that was what the twins was
gigglin' at when they lit a piece OF
paper over the britch hole in the can
nern. But it want. 1t was at what
they was hopin' was goin' to happen,
and what did happin.
81 never heard such a turrible roar,
not even to. Bull Run, as when the
charge went off into the mouth O.
that cave, but it want a tuppence to