davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

Dear said the physicians wife. when
can you let me have Sl0z,, - ..r ,o,e
to cash 4 draft shortly
cash a draft What draft?',
ss77he one I saw old Mr.. jenkins sitting
in this morning. "-Cleveland Leader.
why have you and Harry ceased to
He wanted to begin economizing the
minute We became engaged chicago
Young man. want an explanation
from you. Why did you kiss my daugh-
because I knew You were hiding in the
hall. sir.'-cleveland Plain Dealer
Doesn't it sound ridiculous. to say. the
hand that rocks the cradle Is the nano
that rules the world? What does that
well the hand usually belongs to q
nurse or servant girl, ana you know now
servant girls boss things.-Philadelph
Press.
Miss Jenks-Have you really broken OF
your engagement to him2
was getting too Observation-Disclosures to
talk TO me about Observation-Disclosures
phia Ledger.
Bachelor JncIe-Kitty. it doesn't seem
just the consistent thing. somehow for
you to take your horseback rides man
fashion
Miss Kitty-Why not, Uncle RichardG
Good gracious. can't girl
Bachelor Uncle-There you go sgaini
you swear like a woman-Chicago Tri-
bune.
Madam politely began the man be-
hind. your hat obstructs my view of the
stage I wish you would remove
or she snapped I guess you're see
ing more than your moneys worth"
It am indeed. madam I only paid $50
for this seat and I observe from the tag
on your hat that it's worth 1898. Phil
adelphia Press.
Phyllis-Geeorge. dear, I don't see why
you should like me SO much better be-
George-Why. darling. every time kiss
you It's like kissing another girl-The
Sketch.
who is the best Informed woman IN
your city2'' asked the visitor.
Mrs Dressaiott, replied the native.
All is she a college woman7"
No. but she patronizes every dressma-
zer in town Judge.
DO You believe that Samson lost his
strength by having his hair eut?" asked
the non-believer.
Il have no reason to doubt IT, replied
the practical man. "A talkativa barber
always makes me tired Chicago News.
you don't abuse your political enemies
as severely as you used to-:
is no longer safe. You can't tell nova
days when one Of your old political enc
mics is going to turn up new deal as
Star.
why don't you buy a cottage out in
the rake and bag Of flour Under his arm arm
Takes too much push, replied the wise
city friend.
Why. behind the lawn mower. Chi
cago News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

John Ridgley Carter, secretary of the
American embassy at London. was pilot
ing some American friends through the
museum at Hastings when he observed
an unhappy attendant wearing mill
tarv uniform, with a helmet from which
a chin-strap hung, at whom an inquisI-
tive tourist was firing all manner Of
silly questions.
The tourists last question was, Say,
what is that strap under your chin
for?''
The attendant sighed THE strap is
to rest my jaw when I get tired answer
ing questions" said he.-Harper's
weekly.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28
It Was Sudden.

This is SO suddenr
AS he heard the girl speak these
words, the astonished young man rose
to his feet In bewilderment.
SUDDEN he repeated, did I hear
Alright? More than two years ago. 1
believe it was, that first met you. For
several months after that 1 only saw
you occasionally; then gradually. very
gradually, I increased my visits. It
took six months to get on a formal call
ing basis; it took six months more TO be
a regular visitor; six months more to
call you by your Christian name; and it
is only within the last few weeks that
have ventured, with many misgivings.
even to hold your hand. And now. at
ter all this gradual development of my
love, you tell me that my declaration
Is SO sudden. Do you call this sudden p
I DO, indeed" she replied calmly.
But for what reason?''
The young lady replied with some
degree of hauteur:
Simply this" she replied Z hardly
imagined you would dare to speak to
me like this for another two years. at
least, considering your present salary .
Smiths Weekly
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28
For Swimmers, Snfetr

The physician, slim in his blue flannel
bathing suit, had his ears stuffed with
cotton.
This cotton" he said, should be
used by all those who swim out beyond
their depth You know how often good
swimmers of that type drown, don't
you? Their drowning is imputed to
cranp, but you will never find one of
the drowned with his ears stuffed with
cotton
Why? I'll tell you why. Because it
isn't cramp that causes these drown
ings. It is perforation of the ear
drum, followed by unconsciousness due
to the pressure of the water.
Cramps isn't. after all, the deadly
thing it is made out to be. If you get
a cramp in your leg while swimming.
1t IS easy enough to roll over on your
back and float The cramp won't kill
you. But a perforation of the ear-druu
Is different. 1t takes away your senses.
and down you go like a log. So always,
if you are going to do much swimming.
stuff cotton in your ears. Los Angeles
Times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

John Mitchell is said to be in favor
Of compelling a man to show union
card before he is eligible to sit in a
legislative assembly. The idea is not
original with Mr.. Mitchell. however
The political machines have for years
favored only men who belong to the
political machinists' union.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28
Congressman Curtis now PROPOSES

Congressman Curtis now proposes to
build government macadamized
highway from Fort Leavenworth to
Fort Riley. That ought to be good for
a pretty good bunch of senatorial votes,
II the road can be laid out so as to go
through enough counties.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

GAS we interpret General Gomez
denial of conspiracy" says the Salina
Journal, "he did not conspire, and if
he did he would not acknowledge it, and
he don't care a continental darn if he
was mixed mixed up IN the conspiracy.
He only wants the United States to I'M
derstand that whatever he did he had a
right to do" Like some others, appar-
emily.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

/ President Palma is doubtless casting
anxious glances towards the north to
see II there Is any prospect that Uncle
Sam Will come down and give him a
slit in case the situation becomes too
Serious
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

There is some curiosity as to whether
the next presidents message will really
look like one Of Josh Billings effu-
sions or whether the president is only
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

Bryan and his friends always have
been strong in receptions" but the
November elections have demon
strated their weak points.-Buffalo
Commercial.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28
FEES

tlement of bill for S2,11O. A physi-
clan recently asked a fee at the rate Of
$500 a day. Not much fear that the
sick will die disgra cefully rich.-New
York American.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

+ We cannot see why the accident in
surance companies should refuse to
Issue policies 10 the Russian noble
men. Even If the said noblemen do
collide with a bomb it will be no ac-
=-fdanf
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28
IIOUID AND HOT AIR.

Liquid air can be manufactured for
s125 a gallon and can be used for
cooling drinks" often hot air, which
is the result of cooling drinks. costs a
good deal more.@Richmond News
Leader.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

The cold wave that struck Kansas on
Sunday leads to the belief that Vice
President Fairbanks got here a day or
two sooner than he was expected.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

The printers and proofreaders are
against reformed spelling. They had
Ercuble enough learning to spell the
way they do now. and they object to
having to learn all over again.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

There was a frost in Iowa yesterday
morning. This was not the first of the
season, however. The stand-patters
struck one about three weeks ago.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28
HoBsoNs IMPRESSION.

Captain Hobson wants an annual
naval appropriation Of not less than
S2OO.0O0,O00 The captains impress
sion seems. to be that this country is
John D. Observation-Disclosures
Sentinel
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

Now the Democrats will probably
claim that President Roosevelt is steal
ing their thunder in his spelling reform
also. Anyway many Democrats have
been spelling that way for years, only
more so
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

+ There are some would-be hnanciers in
New York who know just how a lemon
feels: They have been squeezed by Mr.
Hartman.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

South Carolina is evidently very
esrsless Of its population It has
aynched three negroes in ten days.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

Very likely they have all those state
convention endorsements loaded on a
dray, ready to unload on Mr.. Bryan as
soon as he gets where he can receive
+F,--a
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

! The Standard is so used to it now
ehat It would probably be lonesome II
Be wasn't indicted two or three times a
day.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

The Olathe Tribune rises to suggest
that the national encampment of the
G. A r. in 1911 be held in Topeka.
of course. That's the proper idea.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

The mania for gambling on the
Boards Of trade has claimed another
victim. and the bondsmen of Cloud
countys treasurer will hold the sack.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

The State Journal is a member of the
Associated Press and receives the full day
telegraph report OF that great news or
EanizatiOn for the exclusive afternoon
publication In Topeka
The news is received in The State Jour
nal building over wires for this sole pur-
pose.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

SO far no one has suggested Mr..
Roger Sullivan of Illinois as Mr..
Bryan's running mate.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

II you feel the country tip up today,
gou Will know that W. J. B. has just
stepped ashore at New York.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

Rio Janeiro reports that her cham
payne supply has been exhausted. She
reports, also, that the Pan-American
conference has Washing
ton Post.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28
cnMETIMES

From the story Of Harry Thaw and
his wife it appears that a boy with too
much money and a girl with too little
may come to the same bad end
Philadelphia Inquirer.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28
a sIIaTAfER ROMANCE

Summer maiden. Full of fun.
Summer fallow. Chapter One.
Moonlight evening. Naught to DO.
Tender Topics Chapter Two.
Sparkling diamond. Love will be
Ever cherished. Chapter Three.
August passes Girl no more.
Likewise diamond Chapter Four.
Young man weakens. Heart to mend.
Love next season? MOI The End
New Orleans Picayune.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

I This Cuban revolution seems to par
bake OF some OF the qualities of a
Brench duel. Both sides are afraid.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

Louisville has spent S1,50O,00O on q
100000 filtration plant, and still is
digging dirt and for more cash.-St.
Louis Globe-Democrat-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

We judge that the man who has
been stocking the fires at the hot wealth
ar factory went on a vacation Sunday.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28
ans FOR sYMPATHY.

The report that the car Is afraid Of
his cook seems TO be q bid for the
sympathy Of the American housewife.
Newark News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28
sILVER DOLLAR !?

We've been afraid of it, Here comes
the Dallas News, accusing the Repub-
licans of stealing the dollar campaign
scheme from Datto Bryan.=Newarx
News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

Do you notice the political trial bal
looms that are going up during the
silly season Boston Herald
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28


An aged and doddering gentleman
was on the witness stand in case in
Yolvlng the Inheritance Of a goodly and
long ntigated estate It was necessary
that the fact Of the existence of other
heirs than the old gentleman be estab-
n@hed
Have you ever had any brothers or
sisters2" asked the attorney who con-
Quoted the direct examination.
I never had a sister, piped the old
gentleman, but had one brother
Is that brother hving?'
NO, he is dead
When did he dep
about-let's sect was about
$50 years ago.
I asked you-you must have mis-
understood mel asked you when your
brother died.
And I told you about $50 years ago. =
But lam serious in my question and
cannot listen to such absurd answers.
Remember you are under OATH
am telling you the truth" insisted
the old gentleman, earnestly
Here the judge interposed:
The witness must refrain from levity
ana righteousness and cOnfine his an
swers to facts, or I shall be obliged to
take punitive measures for contempt .
Ihere is no contempt, Judge" pro-
tested the witness. Il mean what I
say, and if your honor and the attorney
Wi lgive me an opportunity to explain
shall make it clear to you"
The witness may have an opportuni-
~ to set himself right, if possible said
the judge.
Wei, your honor, my father married
when he was seventeen. A year later
his wife bore him a child and died
The child died within three months.
Ny father remained single until he was
seventy-two, then married a young wo-
man, to whom was born a year later.
1 am ninety-five years of age
After profuse apologies the examfna-
ton roceeded.-Exchange
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

They are now suggesting that
Washington be made a great "jobbing
center" Since when was Washington
anything else ? - Richmond News
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

For the two New Y ork chauffeurs
killed while going at the rate of more
than fifty miles an hour a simple YER
dict of suicide will be enough--Phila-
delphia Ledger.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28
EROM OTHER PENS
THE TREE LUNCH

serve as free lunch in Chicago This
is not quite as bad as we had
suspected. - Charleston News and
Courier
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

Young man, I want an explanation
from you. Why did you kiss my daugh-
ter in the parlor last night?w
Because knew You were hiding IN the
hall, sir.''-Cleveland Plain Dealer
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

why have you and Harry ceased to
be friends2''
He wanted to begin economizing the
minute We became engaged. Chicago
RecOrd-Herald.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

Miss Jenks-Have you really broken on
your engagement to him2
Miss F1ytie-Oh, yes. just had to- He
was getting too sentimental-be9a TO
talk TO me about Philadel-
phia Ledger.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

Doesn't it sound ridiculous to say. the
hand that rocks the cradle Is the hand
that rules the world? What does that
mean. anyways -
well. the hand usually belongs to q
nurse or servant girl, and you know how
servant girls boss things.-Ph Philadelphia
Press.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28
LAFOLLFTTE.s REcOMMEND.


The feeling is growing all over this
country that the proper man to succeed
Theodore Roosevelt is Robert NJ. La
Toilette of Wisconsin. He would have
the determined and bitter opposition Of
all the politicians, all the railroads, all
the big corporations and trusts, but the
people would be back of him. and they
count some.-Rooks County Record
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28
HUMOR OF THE Day

Dear. said the physicians wife, when
can you let me have $10z
Well - replied the medical man. i nope
to cash Il draft shortly
Cash a draft What draft2
ssThe one I saw old Mr. Jenkins Sitting
in this morning. '5-Cleveland Leader
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

who is the best informed woman IN
your city2'' asked the visitor.
Mrs Dressaiott,. replied the native.
HAhl is she a. college woman
NO. but she patronizes every dressma-
ker in town. Judge.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

Madam" politely began the man be-
hind. your hat obstructs my view Of the
stage. I wish you would remove
tO.'' she snapped. I guess you're see
ing more than your moneys worth
It am indeed. madam I only paid $50
for this seat and observe from the tag
on your hat that it's worth 1898. Phil
adelphia Press.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

Phyllis-G George dear, I don't see why
you should like me so much better be-
cause I'm changeable-
GeOrge-Why, darling, every time kiss
you It's like kissing another girl-The
Sketch.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

Bachelor Uncle-Kttty, it doesn't seem
1 just the consistent thing, somehow, for
you to take your horseback rides man
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

Miss kitty-Why not, Uncle RIchaTdF
Good gracious. can't a girl
Bachelor Uncle-There you go againi
That's why. You ride like a man, but
you swear like q woman.-ChicagO Tri-
bune-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-08-28

DO you believe that Samson lost his
strength by having his hair cut?' asked
the non-believer.
Il have no reason TO doubt It," replied
always makes me tired. Chicago News.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1906-11-15

There IA more Catarrh In this section Of the country
than oil other diseases put together, and until the last
few years was supposed u be iEcurable. For Q great
many years doctors pronounced II . local disease and
70 cnre with local treatment, pronounced II incurablo.
Science has proven CAt'.rrh 10 be q constitutional dis
ease, and therefore re. uires constitutions treatment.
Hairs Catarrh Cur, manufactured by Ed. Cheney
= Co., Toledo, Ohio, is the only Constitutional cure on
the market. II 10 taken Internally In doses from 10
drops 70 . teaspoonfui. 1t acts directly on the blood
and mucous surfaces Of the system. They oncr one
bundled dollars for any case II fails " cure. Send
for circulars and testimonials.
Addrsas: F.J. CHENEY q CO., Toledo, Ohio
Sold BY DruYgists, 75c.
take FAIRS Family Piils for constipation.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1906-11-15
W.fjd's Gold Production.

In the last 500 years over twelve
billion dollars worth OF gold Is esti'
mated to have been dug from the
earth. Not much more than one-half
of this is definitely known to be In
existence In the monetary stocks OF
the globe. or this, however, the
United States is believed to hold from
a billion and a quarter to q billion and
a half.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1906-11-15

With a smooth IRON and Defiance
Starch, you can launder your shirt
waist Just as we'll at home as the
steam laundry can; 1t will have the
proper stiffness and finish, there will
be less wear and tear Of the goods,
and 1t will be a positive pleasure to
use a Starch that does not stick to the
iron.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1906-11-15
Makes Son Private Secretary.

In appointing his son. Lord Bruce.
as his private secretary the earl OF
Elgin only followed the example OF
the late William Il. Gladstone. who.
when he became prime minister In
1889, appointed Herbert Gladstone.
then a young man of 20, to q similar
position.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1906-11-15

Starch, like everything else, 10 b.
ing constantly improved, the patent
Starches put on the market 26 years
ago are very different and inferior to
those Of the present day. In the lat
est Observation-Disclosures H~tarch-all In.
furious chemicals are omitted. while
the addition Of another ingredient. In.
vented by Us. gives to tho Starch .
strength and smoothness never ap.
preached by other brands.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1906-11-15

Honey From Spain and Germany.
There are 100000 b~eehives. pro-
ducing 10000 tons OF honey. In Spain.
which 10 the second greatest producer
Of honey In the world. Germany,
with 2.000,0 900 beehives. produces co..
900 tons.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1906-11-15
MAGAZINE For the Blind.

Magazine For the Blind.
Through the munincence Of the wid.
ow of . New York capitalist. the
means has been supplied for the es.
tablishing Of . magazine printed In
blind point type.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1906-11-15
Income From Abroad.

The London Economist states that
British capitalists draw an income Of
$500. 000. 900 from their foreign invest.
ments. Last fiscal year they paid
income tax on $3.50. 300. 900. a. com.
pared with 3l95. 100. 900 20 years ago.
The largest amount Is derived from
interest on foreign and colonial gov
eminent securities and the next larg'
est sum from dividends and interest
from foreign and colonial concerns.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1906-11-15

Defiance Starch Is the latest inven.
don in that line and an Improvement
on all other makes; 1t Is more eco
nomical, does better work, takes less
time. Get It from any grocer.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1906-11-15

- The man who sows his life in the
burrows Of human need will reap {
rich reward.-W. Smith.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1906-11-15

Lewis Single Binder straight &c. Many
smokers prefer them to lOc cigars. Your
dealer or Lewis Factory, Peoria, III.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1906-11-15

Every duty which we omit. obscures
some truth which we should have
knOwn,-Ruskin.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1906-11-15

LAwis' Single Binder straight &c ciga,
mace Of rich, mellow tobacco. You
dealer or Lewis Factory, Peoria, III.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1906-11-15

II q man 10 really In love with .
girl the redness Of her hair Is invisi.
BILE.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1906-11-15

Fruit acids win not stain goods dyed
with PUTNAM FADELESS DYES, and
the colors are bright and fast.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1906-11-15

Every man has an excuse for drink.
lng-snd each 10 worse than the
other.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1906-11-15

Mrs. wlns1OW's Soothing Syrup.
For children t-sthing, 80 items the gums, reduces IN.
nAmmAtion ailays pain. cures wind collie. BIC Q bottle.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1906-11-15

Women who kiss each other arl
often guilty OF counterfeiting.