davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13
SPELLING AT BREAKFAST.
Mr.. Topnoody Thought He Would
Show His Smartness, But Was
Taken Down.

Mr.. Topnoody had been to a
show over night, and
the funny cOnundrums and jokes
he heard set him thinking. So
breakfast he began on Mrs.
TOpnOOdy. She was fretful, and
not very much in the humor for
pleasantly, but TOpnoody
slashed away, relates Stray Sto-
ries.
81 say, Mrs. T%opnQody, can you
spell money with four letters?"
"No, l can't" she said.
cha, ha! That's good. A
woman never can get at>this sort
of thing in the same clear-headed
way a man can. Well the way
to spell it is cash. Isn't that
money!"
Mrs. T. failed to smile, and
Topnoody started out with an.
other.
"Wait a minute" she inter.
rupted. Owe got one. Let's see
if you can guess it. Spell Top
moody with five letters"
TOpnOody puckered his brows
awhile, gave it up.
"Ha, hap laughed Mrs. T
THAT'S good. A man can never
get at this sort of thing in the
same clear-headed way a woman
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13
Dining on Snails.

Four Britons ate snails at a
French restaurant in Brighton,
England, not long ago. Their ex.
%periences are described as fol-
lows: "In due course the plates
appeared, each bearing half-a.
dozen snail shells of a dingy
white. A slender two-pronged
fork accompanied each dish.
With this the snails were jerked
out, their big black horns coming
first, accompanied by a small
eruption of gravy. One of the ex-
perimenters looked critically at
the uninviting object at the end
of his fork, then he shut his eyes
and popped it into his mouth.
His teeth met on something
yielding, but tough, rather sug-
gestive of India rubber. All four
epicures manfully ate their six
snails."
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13
A Tragic Finish.

A watchman's neglect permit
ted a leak in the great North Sea
dyke, which a child's finger could
have stopped, to become a ruinous
break, devastating an entire pro-
vince of Holland. In like manner
Kenneth McIver, of Vanceboro,
Me-, permitted a little cold to 60
unnoticed until a tragic finish was
only averted by DR.. King'sENew
Discovery. He writes: "Three
doctors gave me up to die of lung
Inflammation, caused by a neg
lected cold; DR.. Kings New Dis
covery saved my life. Guaranteed
best cough and cold cure, at :E,
B. Moore, drug store. SOC and 81,
Trial bottle free.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13
First Forest Reserves.

BY the act of March 3, 1891,
the president of the United
States was authorized to pro-
claim forest reserves; a power
first exercised by President Har.
rison, who, on March 30 of that
year, created the Yellowstone
park timber land reserve. Au.
thority over these reserves was
given to the secretary of the in
terror, the administrative work
to be conducted by the general
land Office. In 1896 the secretary
of the interior requested the Ma.
tional Academy of Science to
recommend a national forest pol
icy. This resulted in the passage
of the act of June 4, 1897, under
which, with several subsequent
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13
Loutre.

John Fenner ofnear Big Spring
came up Saturday after his sister,
Mrs. Mollie Clark, who is going to
visit him for q few days.
VIM. Dixon and family of Clear
creek visited j. A. Walker and
family Sunday.
Mrs. p. M. Clark left Friday foI
a few days visit in Danville.
Miss Mae Dempsey of Mont.
gomery City came down last Sat-
urday for a few weeks visit with
Miss Emma Stiegman.
G. E. Bookseller and family
spent the day Sunday with P. H,
Bookseller and family.
Chas. Lichte spent Sunday with
Aug Stiegmann and family.
G.. A. Brookshier was in New
Florence Monday morning after q
new buggy.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13
COUNTY NEWS
The TRIBUNE Wants Correspondents
in all Parts of Montgomery County.
New Hope and Union Grove.

wow r1Opo anu OfIiOu oTONos
A two inch rain fell here Tues
day morning, which. was very
beneficial to the corn.
Miss Mary Worland has been
visiting her brother, Geo. Wor-
land this week.
Leslie Eames is;no the sick list
this week.
The two Mesdames Kemists of
Wellsville were theIguests of Mrs.
G. L. Rogers Monday.
John Reagan, jr., was the lguest
of John Games Sunday.
Threshing is an everyday affair
now in this community.
"Grandma" Johnson visited
Mrs. Ebert Oliver Sunday.
Leta Oliver was given a surprise
party by the young people in this
neighborhood last Saturday night.
Leila Games returned home Sun
day from a few days visit in Wells
Vile.
Miss Mary Worland was the
guest of Mrs. Pete Oliver Monday.
Miss Lee Vomund returned to
her home in Martinsburg Satur-
day.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13
WHAT THE KIDNEYS DO.
Their Unceasing Work Keeps US
Strong and Healthy.

All the blood in the body pas
lei through the kidneys once
every three minutes. The kidneys
filter the blood. They work night
and day. When healthy they re-
move about 500 grains impure
matter daily. When unhealthy
some part of.this impure matter
is left in the blood. This brings
on many diseases and symptoms
pain in the back, headache, ner-
vousness, hot, dry skin, rheuma-
tism, govt, gravel, disorders of
the eyesight and hearing, dizzi-
ness, irregular heart, debility,
drowsiness, dropsy, deposits in
the urine, etc. But if you keep
the filters right, you will have no
trouble with the kidneys.
w. N. Mitchell, farmer, living
in the northwestern part ofiMont-
gomery City, Mo-, says: 81 found
it very difficult to work on account
of the condition my back was in.
1t was not only lame but it ached
constantly and there was some
bladder trouble accompanying it.
Such as having to arise frequently
at night, and difficulty in pas
sing-the kidney secretions. 1 was
nervous and weighed down with a
tired feeling that chung to me in
spite of the different remedies
that 1 tried. Finally reading of
Doan's Kidney Pills l was induced
to go to Crump & Kidwell's drug
store and got them. Since using
them l am free from the trouble
in my back and there remains no
stiffness in my nick, nor head
aches. MY kidneys are active and
no urinary annoyance afnicts me,
Doan's Kidney Pills are most af-
fectives
For sale by all dealers. Price,
so cents. Foster Milburn Co.,
Buffalo, N. Y, sole agent for the
United States.
Remember the name--Doan's-
and take no other.
Old papers for sale at this ofics
t5c per hundred.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13
Waiting at Arms length

From the New York Mall.
Creating a better tone to the
modern academy and ballroom"
Is n OF the worthy objects Of tho
United Professional Masters Of
Dancing of America, as stated in
their prospectus. To this end, at
the annual session now In session
or shall we say In salutation?-in
this city, 1t has been decreed that,
for the next year at least, men and
women must hold each other at
arms length in the waltz. "Seo
how the young men and young
women hug each other in he
waltz" said one of these masters
That's all wrong"
These gentlemen are on tho
right track. Any one must have
noticed that current styles of
particularly those from fair Har-
ward, are a trifle too clinging. To
the bachelors and spinsters who
"paper the wall" they seem al
together silly. The young people
on the floor apparently act on the
principal laid down in a current
popular song, "It's the time, it's
the place, for a great big IN
BRACE" But it isn't. The wom-
en- of the land should have cor
rected this matter ere this: instead
of it, they are all singing, waltz
me around again, Willie" So
the embattled masters have inter-
vened to impose a lesson of de-
corum. Nobody objects to peo-
pie sitting out a waltz if they want
to; but Waiting out a tete-a-tete
in the ballroom glare is quite
another thing. excuse u.s." ex-
claimed the scandalized masters,
and we who paper the wall in
dorse.
AS many sins are committed in
the name of dancing as in the
name of acting. 1t is both an ex-
ercise and an art, and in either
capacity self indulgence is fatal
to it. It demands of it's ~votsries
self restraint and self denial, and
that is the ruling factor even in
the Oriental modes which have
been SO caricatured in this coun-
try. Properly interpreted, the
dance is a highly impersonal in
stitution, and as Havelock Ellis
has pointed out, an aid 10 morale
ty rather than a breach of de-
corum.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13
THE SMILE

that won't come off, appears on
baby's face after one bottle of
Whites Cream Vermifuge. The
great worm medicine. Why not
keep that smile ON baby's face. If
you keep this medicine on hand,
you will never see any thing else
but smiles on His face. Mrs. S..
Blackwell, Okla, writes: "My
baby was peevish and fretful.
Would not eat and l feared he
would die. / used a bottle OF
Whites Cream Vermifuge and he
has not had a sick day since.
Sold by Crump & Kidwell.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13
YOUR LIVER

Your liver is out of order. You
go to bed in a bad humor and get
up with a bad taste in::your mouth.
You want something to stimulate
your liver. Just try Herbine, the
aiver regulator. A positive cure
for Constipation, Dyspepsia and
all liver complaints. Mrs. F..
ut. Worth, Texas, writes:
"Have used Herbine tn my FAM
lily for years. Words can't ex-
presse what I think about it,
Everybody in my household are
happy and well, and we owe it te
Herbine. Sold by Crump & Kid
well.
Subscribe tor the TRIBUNE, $i.o(
q year.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13
ALL THE WORLD

knows that Billiards. Snow Lini-
ment has no superior for Rheu-
matism, Stiff Joints, Cuts, Sprains,
Lumbago and all pains. Buy it,
try it, and you will always 8 it.
Anybody who has used Billiards.
Snow Liniment is a living proof
of what it does. All we ask of
you is to get a trial bottle. Price
25c, SOC and $1.00. Sold by
Crump & Kidwell.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13

can. Well the way to spell it
is idiot. Isn't that Top
noody"
But TopnOody never smiled,
and the breakfast was finished
in silence except for an Occa.
sional chuckle from Mrs. Top
noOdy's end of the table.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13
Our Subscription Rates.

The subscription price of the
Montgomery TRIBUNE is one doll
lar a year, in advance. We also
club the Tribune with the st. Louis
Globe Democrat twice a-week)
for S1.75 a year for both papers,
Clubbing rates with any otheIpati
pers IL desired.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13

Following is a list of letters re-
naming unclaimed in the post.
Office at Montgomery City, Mo-,
July Z 1906, and If not called for
within two weeks will be sent to
dead letter Office:
Mrs. j. G. Brad.
q. E. NUNS, p. M.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13

Regulates the bowels, promotes
easy natural action, and cures
constipation-D o a ms Regulets.
Ask your druggist for them.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13
81

Miss Ida Wilson delightfully."- en-
tertained a number of her young
friends at the home of her "grand-
pa" Monday evening. She re-
turned to her home in Montgom-
cry City same evening after hav-
ing spent several weeks here with
relatives. ]
Miss Vashti Harrell of Mont
sgomery City returned home Mon
day evening after a two days visit
to relatives and friends. Mics
Vashti vas formerly a ~Jonesburg
girl and we are always glad to see
her.
E. L. Bolton, the "landIman" of
Warrenton visited here Monday.
Mrs. DR.. E. A. Ball and two
children, and Miss Sarah Owings
who have been visiting in Texas
the past two weeks returned home
Thursday evening.
Ruth Hartwell returned to her
home in st. Louis Saturday after
q two weeks visit with relatives.
E. P. Rosenberger iof Montgom-
cry City, Pros. Atty, was There
Saturday on official business.
Quite q number of our young
people took "a "trip around the
world" Friday evening. A good
time reported by all. The Epworth
League, under whose auspices this
entertainment was given. realized
about SO.
Ward Parsons of New Florence
spent Sunday here with friends.
o. j. Mudd and son, Sumner, of
Kirkwood spent Sunday here the
guests of Mr.. and Mrs. W.. L..
Smith.
j. H. Wilson and wife and two
children, Julia and Flora, went to
st. Louis Saturday to visit their
daughter, Mrs. w. R. Lavender.
All returned Sunday evening ex-
cspt Miss Flora, w%hojswill spend
several weeks with her sister.
Miss Pauline White of Mont
gomery City spent Sunday here
with her friend, Miss Eulah Ma
son.
Edw. Bronstrup of Warrenton
visited here a few hours Saturday
and Sunday.
Miss Ida Moore of Montgomery
City was here afew:days last week
endeavoring to raise an:.elocution
class. She is quite an artist In heI
line, and we wish her lsuccess in
our midst.
Miss Irene Urfer of Kansas City
arrived Saturday morning for q
several weeks visit to her::cousin,
Mis-. Leah Begeman. Mrs. Urfe,
will arrive the latter part of the
week for a visit to relatives.
Zerr & McCullough's team go,
scared Tuesday afternoon in front
of their meat market, and run
about a mile and a half before be.
ing stopped. They did no serious
damage either to themselves OF
wagon.
Rev. r. E. McQuie of Montgom.
cry City spent a few hours here
Tuesday.
Quite a number from this place
attended the ice cream social IL
High Hill Saturday night.
Ward Jones of St. Louis, for.
merly of this place, is helping
Sterling Graham to get his tele.
phone exchange in operation
The work is progressing nicely.
nearly all Of the boxes are in.
H. B. Algermissen and wife o;
st. Peters visited their son, Emil
here Sunday. They we're &C.
.companied home by F. Wiechenl
and wife also of st. Peters.
Remember the Jonesburg stree
fair Sept. 20, Fl, az. The TIM
when we'll "show YOU"
Wv. T.
YOUR LIVER
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13
The New State
of Oklahoma

Statehood for OKLAHOMA and
Indian Territory will give this SEQ
ton a tremendous impetus in
growth and development. Even
now, the towns and cities arc
growing up, requiring more and
demanding more; pushing wide
awake citizens who see the virtue
of encouraging enterprises o fevery
kind, in needfuluess of getting
more and better facilities, and
more hands to develop the coun-
try.
Briefly, the condition Of this:
OKLAHOMA is in need of moth
ing save people. More men are
wanted. There are vast areas of
unimproved land-land not yield
ing the crop of which tits capable
The same thing, in a different way
is true of the towns. Few lines Of
business are adequately repre-
scented. There are openings of all
~sorts-for mills and manufacture
ing plants, for small stores of all
kinds, for banks, newspapers and
lumber yards. Mackenzie and pro-
fessional men are both in demand
Your Opportunity Now
while land is cheap and the coun-
try is settling up.
On July II, August z and f, ex-
ceptionally low rates will be made
to OKLAHOMA; tickets good
thirty days from date of sale and
permitting stop-overs at pleasure
This rate, with the stop-over priv
Hedges, will enable you to thor
oughly investigate every .section
of the new state.
If you are interested in OKLA
HOMA you should read the
July issue of my free paper.
"'The Coming Country "Write
for it To-day.
w. s. ST. GEORGE
General Passenger Agent
Nj. X. and 7. Ry.
$50 wainwright Building 81. Louis. No
\ G@
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13
amendments, Forest reserves are
now administered.
Congo Torture Platforms.

A missionary recently re-
turned from the region of upper
Congo. in Africa, says that he
saw there "a curious platform 30
feet high erected in front of the
head sentry's house. The latter
informed the missionary that it
was a large stage from which to
shoot leopards. but natives told
him that it was a torture plat
form. UnfOrtunates who did not
bring in sufficient quantities Of
rubber were first beaten, some
times almost to death, and then
taken to the top of the structure
and compelled to gaze at the sun
until relatives brought the neces-
sary amount of rubber as re-
demptiOn.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13
Novel Dog Market.

The Vienna Fancy Dog club
has established a novel dog mar
ket. Persons with dogs for sale
are invited to send the animals
to the clubrooms every Wednes-
day, where they will be exhibit
ed. Each animal will be exam
ined by a veterinary surgeon and
also appraised by experts. Pur-
chasers can therefore be assured
that the dogs are quite free from
disease and also worth the price
demanded. And all this service
will be performed entirely free
of charge; neither buyer nor
seller will be asked to contribute
a penny. The club will bear all
the expenses, as its only object in
instituting the markets to pro-
mote the breeding and traffic in
dogs of good race.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13

Subscribe TOR the TRIBUNE, $500
. year.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1906-07-13

Old papers for sale at this oface
15c per hundred.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1906-09-05

1t is possible to obtain relief from
chronic indigestion and dyspepsia by the
use of Kodol for dyspepsia. Some of the
most hopeless cases of long standing
have yielded to it. 1t enables you 10
digest the food you eat and exercises
a corrective influence, building up the
efficiency of the digestive orgaus. The
stomach is the boiler wherein the steam
is made that keeps up your vitality,
health and strength. Kodol digests
what you eat. Makes the stomach
sweet-puts the boiler in condition to do
the work nature demands of it-gives
you relief from digestive disorders and
puts you in shape to do your best, and
feel your best. Sold by Chas. Rhodes.
For a painful burn there is nothing
like DeWitts Witch Hazel Salve. There
are host of limitations of DeWitt's
Witch Hazel Salve en- the market--see
that you get the genuine. Ask for De-
Wits. Good, too, for sunburn, cuts,
bruises and especially recommended for
piles. The name +. c. Dewitt & Co. is
on every box. Sold by Chas. Rhodes.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1906-09-05
New Homes in the West.

Over a million acres of land will be
thrown open to settlement on the Sho-
shone Indian Reservation June 10. 1906.
These lands are reached by the direct
route of the Chicago & North Western
R'y from Chicago, st. Paul, Minneapo-
lis, Omaha and other points in the Miss
issippi Valley, Send &c in stamps for
pamphlets, maps and full particulars to
w. B. Kniskern, p. T. NJ, @. & N. w.
R'y Co., Chicago
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1906-09-05

COUNTY OF GRATIor. %
At a Session Of the Probate Court for said
County, held at the Probate Office in the Village
of Ithaca on the 4th day of August in the wear
one thousand nine hundred six.
Present, Isaac Seaver, Judge Of Probate.
In the Matter of the Estate Of Ralph Ely, de-
ceased.
ON reading and filing the petition duly verified,
of Townsend A. Ely, son of said deceased, praying
that the administration of said estate be granted
To- himself, or some other suitable person.
Ihereupon il Is Ordered That Thursday tho
9th day Of September next at ten O'Clock in the
forenoon, be assigned for the hearing of said pc
titon and that the next Of kin and heirs-at-aw of
said deceased, and all other persons interested
in said estate required to appear at a session
of said Court, then 10 be holden in the Probate
Office, in the Village OF Ithaca and show cause
if any there be, why the prayer Of the petit
toner should not be granted.
And il Is Further Ordered, That said petitioner
give notice TO the persons interested in said
estate, Of the tendency of said petition and the
hearing thereof, by causing a copy of this order
to be published in the Alma RECORD news
paper printed and circulated in said county.
three successive weeks previous to said day of
hearing "a true copy)
SEAL. ISAAC s. SEANER.
GOAT Judge of Probate.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1906-09-05

The tar that is contained III Bees Lax
alive Honey and Tar is harmless. 1t is
not coal tar, but is obtained from the pine
trees of our own native forests. Bees
Laxative Honey and Tar is the best REM
edy for colds because it acts on the bow
els-thus expelling ali colds from the
system. Bees is the original Laxative
Honey and Tar, and is best for coughs,
colds, Group, whooping cough, lung and
bronchial affections. Sold by Geo. E.
Sharrar
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1906-09-05

Default having been made in the con-
dltlons or one certain mortgage made
and executed on the 4th day OF April.
River Township, Gratiot County, Michi
gan, to WILLIAM PALMER, OF Alma,
Michigan, which said mortgage was
Register of Deeds for Gratiot COUNTS tive
Michigan, In Liber 81 of Mortgages, on
page 1923, upon which mortgage there
is now due at the date OF this notice
Twenty-six Hundred Eighty-one Dol
lars and Twenty-Five Cents (S2,6S1.25),
and the further sum OF Thirty-hye Dol
lars (S35.00) as an attorney fee, to-
gether with other legal and taxable
costs OF this foreclosure.
And no suit or proceeding at law or
In chancery having been instituted to
recover the debt now remaining Sc
thereof.
Now. therefore, notice is hereby
given that by virtue OF the power OF
sale in said mortgage contained, and
in pursuance OF the statute in such
case made and provided, will sell the
premises described in said mortgage at
public vendue at the north front door
or the Court House in the Village OF
Ithaca, Michigan, on Saturday, THE
1906, at ten o'clock in the forenoon Of
said day, for the purpose of satisfying
the amount then due on said mort
gage, with interest thereon at six per
legal and taxable costs and an attor-
ney fee Of Thirty-five Dollars.
The premises described in said mort
gage are as follows: The south one
half Is ~ OF the northwest one
quarter INV ~ of Section number four an
OF Township number twelve Cl2) north, range
three ~ west Michigan.
Dated, June 10Th, 1906.
WILLIAM PALMER,
- Mortgage.
Attorney for Mortgage.
Business address. Alma. Michigan.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1906-09-05

The best safeguard against headache,
constipation and liver troubles is DeWitt's
Little early Risers. Keep vial of these
famous little pills in the house and take a
dose at bed time when you feel that the
stomach and bowels need cleansing. they
don't gripe. Sold by Chas. Rhodes.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1906-09-05

One would think the Laxative idea in a
cough syrup would have been advanced
long before it was. 1t seems the only
rational remedy for Coughs and Colds
would be to move the bowels and clean
the mucous membranes of the throat and
lungs at the same time. Kennedy's Lax
alive Honey and Tar does this. 1t IS the
Original Laxative Cough Syrup, the best
known remedy for Coughs, Colds, Group,
Whooping Cough etc. Tastes good and
harmless. Sold by Chas. Rhodes.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1906-09-05

A torpid, inactive liver can produce
more bodily ills than almost anything
else. 1t is good to clean the system out
occasionally. Stir the liver up and get
into shape generally. The best results
are derived from the use of DeWitt's
Little Early Risers. Reliable, effective,
pleasant pills with a reputation. Never
gripe. Sold by Chas. Rhodes.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1906-09-05

If you are troubled with Piles and can't
find a cure, try Witch Hazel Salve, but be
sure you get that made by +. c. Dewitt
& Co., Chicago. II is the Original. IF
you have used Witch Hazel Salve without
being relieved it is probable that you
got hold of one of the many worthless
counterfe.ts that are sold on the reputa-
ton of the genuine DeWitts Witch Hazel
Salve. Chas. Rhodes.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1906-09-05

The best way to rid the system of a
cold is to evacuate the bowels. Ken
nedy's Laxative Honey and Tar acts as
pleasant, yet effectual cathartic on the
bowels. II clears the head, cuts the
phlegm out of the throat, strengthens the
bronchial tubes, relieves coughs, colds,
Group, whooping cough etc. Sold by
Chas. Rhodes.