davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
A Wonder.

"Jinx has got funny wife,"
'How's that?''
'eWhy, they were going to Calves
ton Sunday, and she only had half
an hour to get ready, and
''And it took her two hours to get
her hat on straight-nothing funny
about that
you've got it wrong; they were at
the depot Is minutes before train
time''-Houston Post.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20

The evidence before the British
army stores commissioners as to graft
during the Boer war shows that there
was only one regiment the contractors
were unable to cheat. That proud dis
tinction belongs to the Seventh Hus-
sars. They weighed everything and
checked the quality of everything sup
piled them.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20

1t is spelled pillow on the prairies
where it glides through foot or two
of the rich, black mould, but in New
England, where it hits few thou
sand stones per acre, it is more nat
ural- to make hard work of it, thus,
s'n-I-O-II-g-h -
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
Noah's ADVANTAGE.

Mrs. Noah was complaining that her
clothes looked as if they had come out
of the ark.
con the contrary" returned her
spouse, they have just come across
the water
Herewith he congratulated himself
on the cheapness of imported gowns
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20

Small Price for Grewsome Relic.
A rope that had been used by the
public executloner In the hanging OF
several murderers was sold at auc-
ton in London the other day and
brought $1-25.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20

The picture of Gladys Vanderbilt
milking a cow is creating considerable
amusement. The artist has put her
on the wrong side of the animal
Never mind, she belongs to the creme
de la creme of society and can stand
it.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
Good Jokes
Couldn't Risk 1t

Clara-I don't think Jack is very
sincere.
Bess-Why?
Clara-Just before we left the sum.
mer resort he wanted me to give hims
back all the snap shots that had BEEN
taken of us in silly positions-De-
troit Free Press.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20

In 1905 there were S3,376 fewer in
surance policies written by the New
York companies than in the preceding
year. That means that both the COM
panies and the public are taking few
er risks.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
A Precarious CaIIino.

1.-THE picture business. suppose, is
a very risky one," remarked the curl
Gus observer to the art dealer
mot necessarily" replied the lat
ter; what makes you think so?"
-Oh, notice that it is always going
to the WALL" was the reply
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
Very Aqqravatinq.

Maud-As if it wasn't bad enough
to have no men escorts at the beach,
the manager made things still more
aggravating-
Mabel-In what way?
Maud-He hired a female orchestra
to furnish music for the hotel.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
Used Every Possible Effort.

Els it fact that your mother-in-law
threw herself out of the third-story
window and you did nothing to re-
strain her?'
Excuse me. went to the first story
to catch her. but she had already
passed." :.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
When Woman Yields.

A woman may stoically resist
temptation at every counter in the
store and yet fall helpless victim
to the wiles of the saleswoman in the
lingerie department. hacked by the
beauty of the wares she displays
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20

France is progressive in many ways,
but the fight it is having over ques-
tions of religious belief does seem
century or so behind the times.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20

A school of cookery has been es
tablished in Vienna. Some particular
person must have been complaining
about his Vienna schnitZel-
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20

Mrs Belle Armstrong Whitney say
New York men wear cOrsets- It's Gu
rious that any man stays in New York
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
The Ideal

"Pop."
Yes, my son.
when a fellow goes to circus and
gets red lemonade and peanuts,
doesn't he have to give money for
emp
Certainly he does, my boy"
well, this paper says here that
money won't buy happiness" -Yon-
kers Statesman.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
inexpensive, But

Inexpensive, But
Oldun-I just paid $50 for new
set of teeth. How do you like them?
Youngun-Oh, they look all right
But why didn't you call on Jones and
get a full set inserted free?
Oldun-Why, 1 didn't know Jones
was a dentist.
Youngun-He isn't, but he keeps a
savage dog.-Chicago Daily News.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
Not Literary.

THAT man may seem to you some
what uneducated, and yet he makes
fine living by his pen-
.swhy. would never take him for .
writer"
He isn't; he raises pigs"
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
Surprised.

Miss Mugley-Did Mr. Knox seem
surprised to hear that l was engaged?
Miss Cutting-Oh, little bit
Miss Mugley-Did he ask when it
happenedz
Miss Cstting-No, not when" but
chow on earth z''-Tit-Bits-
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20

Andrew Lang says he does not care
for American criticism of his writings
Perhaps American criticism of his golf
might touch Andrew up a bit.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20

A proposition to reform the spell
ing of Bjornstjerne Bjornson's name
might strike the public favorably.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
Backsheesh.

Upgardson-What impressed you
most during your trip abroad?
Atom-The touches / got every where
went, of course.-Chicago Tribune
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20

Marie Corelli says that she 1oathes
America because the people are after
the dollar Now that attention is
called to it, seems if we had noticed
movement in the dollars direction.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
REWARD,

AIgv-What did your father offer?
Cholly-Said if / raised Cain, he
wuold give me an equal amount
Puck
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20

ShortzI say. old man. owe you
five, don't :?
Sprowtz-Yes, SO you do.
Shortz-Have you got change for a
quid2
Spron Sz-Yes, rather.
Shortz-WeH, lend me another arr
dollar then
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
Had to Be.

This viii have to be time ex-
posure," said the photographer.
sTm glad of that, cause we amt got
no money, said the husband OF the
sitter-Houston Post
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20

An Indiana peddler, who never took
a bath, died at the age of so years
If he had taken few ne might have
been peddling yet-maybe.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
H. s. GIvLER. Pub

The busy BIS of Russia are bombs.
bayonets and bullets
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20

In case we have spelling reform will
the people of Boston consent to drop
the '.r'' in Hannah ?-Chicago Record
Herald
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
Look Ahead,

LOOK AnedG.
There's a sob and a sigh
And a doubt for tomorrow,
A cloud in the sky
And a cup filled with sorrow.
For the man who looks back
On the hopes that are dead,
Forgetting the ones
That. are lying ahead
Milwaukee Sentinel.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
place for Everytbino.

Place for Everything.
Patience-So you don't like frogs
legs?
Patrice-oh. think they're all right
in their place
and where is their place, pray?"
"On the frossi"-Yonkers States
man.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
Extremes Meet.

First Prisoner-What are you here
for?
Second Prisoner-Fast riding What
are you here for?
''Siow riding
"How's that?"
Il ran off with bicycle-"-casselrs
Journal
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
Wasted Endeavor.

The waves keep breaking on the shore
With resonant and rhythmic stroke.
They still break on with ruthless roar
Though all of us long since were broke.
Washington Star.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20

Edith-Is that your earliest ances-
tor?
Chawley-Naw; That's only the guy
that left us the money to buy the,
others with.''-Chicago Daily News.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20

IF you learn nothing, baron, you
will remain stupid and never amount
% anything in ths world!
20, shall be a hereditary Imperial
councillor all the same!"-Jugend.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-10-20
Natural.

Did 1 not love my neighbor
AS myself I'd be a churl;
Because you see my neighbor
Is very pretty girl.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1906-07-07
j. Wesley Capps Killed.

Mr.. E. A. Mathis. who has been
over In the eastern portion of Grant
parish representing the Chronicle this
week. sends us word that on Monday,
July 2d. about IL a. M. ]. w. Capps
was shot from ambush and Instantly
Killed. at point about three miles
west of Selma. on the tram road of
the Grant Land and Lumber Co.
At the time Of the shooting Cappe
was walking In the road behind n log
team driven by Charles Nngent, who
was hauling logs for Caps ut the
time. The deceased was shot in the
left arm and side. at n distance of 20
or 30 feet. with both barrels OF a shot
gun, about twenty buckshot striking
him. DIR. ID. W. Kelly was summon
ed. and with others who visited the
place viewed the body. Nugent
claims not to know who did the
although 1t occurred in a
hundred feet of him. in n compare
lively open country and toIerably
plain view.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1906-07-07

eph Bills. Emily Fredieu. Peter San.
san. and Others. was granted, pro.
vided right of way was donated by
owners OF the land through which Il
will pass. and VIM. Stewart, +. p.
Bullitt. j. k. Miller, Lestan LeMoine,
j. w. Stantield and Peter Sansan ap-
pointed to review out the same
The treasurer made his report.
which was checked. found correct and
quietus issued for same.
NJ. L. SwaffOrd. sheriff, made his
final report and settlement of the
rolls for 1906. which was found cor
rect and quietus issued.
j. j. O'Qninn was authorized to
to sell the old safe In the clerks Office
for $3.50. and to place the proceeds of
the sale In the roller shelving for the
clerks vault.
On motion of j. +. Drewett, Aaron
Nash and Henry Charbino were plac-
ed on the pauper's list.
There being no further business the
body adjourned on motion of l.. NJ.
Futrell.
JOHN RANDOLPH,
W. Ii. CLARKE. President.
Clerk
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1906-07-07
Meeting Of Grant Parish Mlcfli.
cal Society.

The Grant Parish Medical Society
met In regular session on Monday
July 2, 1906, Mt 10 a. m. In the town
Of Colfax, with the following mem.
beers present: DR.. T. j. Harrison,
president; DIR. Il. H. Black wood, sec
rotary and treasurer pro tenn; Dr.
W. J. Roberts, DIR. Il. b. Gray, DR..
Philip Goode.
On account Of the Inability OF many
members of the Society to attend the
July meeting. It was decided to post
pone the regular program tn the next
quarterly meeting. which viii occur
about the first Of October, 1906.
1t Is earnestly desired that the citi-
zens OF our parish shall fully under
stand that the organisation Of the
Parish Medical Society stands for
higher i'leals In medical education
and skill, and strictly opposes all
charIatans. impure drugs
and food. and pretentIous cure-alis,
and all forms of adultera tions.
DIR. T. j. HARRISON,
DIR. j. L. WOODALL, Prest.
Secretary.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1906-07-07

Alexandria, La. July 3.-The Democratic RI.
ssaslve Computes OF the Seventh Congressional
qsorun preeent ~ follows: Hon c. hi. Teal
OF Grant parish. Chairman; Gen. d. T. stafford
o. ksPadss parish. vice chairmsn: N. J. Cusnins.
ham, Jf. Of Vernon parish. sscrstary z. n M
buisson. OF 81. Landry: with the foiiowinG rrpr,-
seuted By proxy: W. b. Smart. Of vernon. = r
Gsuthier, Of Cslessies; l. J; Dossm.n. Of st..
OF Arcadia The chairman was AUTHORIZED 70
appoint COMMITTEES Of three 20 draw M rules
ana Regulations governing primary election for
the Seventh Cousrsssionsl District for ne sir.
tleth Congress. The committee eonsistjnr Of =
B. Dubuieson. D. T. Stafford and n J. Cvuuino.
nan. nae the following report. which was una1-
Resolved. That Democrats primary ,leetlo,
Ds held throughout the seventh Congressional
~. h o. ne STATE OF Louisiana. ON Friday. the
noufs for TIE purpose OF nominating the candI-
DATE o. the Democratic party for Representative
10, ssd s'. OF the United States TOR
grst Tuesday In November. 1885, said primary
election to be held undsr the proyioions ruI:s
nno insofar a. the sams may be ap-
the STATE OF Louisians. approved aad entitled
. An Act to provide for calling holding conduct
ing ana rssuiating Of primary elections. To
nominasions to b. made By any political party
Ior caoddaee for the once of Cnited States Senc-
1or. Member. Of the HOUSE Of Reprssentativs in
U0fOGDfAI nc
cers. members Of the Senate and House of Reprc-
sentesfves OF the state Of Louisiana and of citv
ana vard omcers Of all eitiss. towns and Villages
s s Pc made oy direct primary: to define the
Term political party under this act; to prsorribe
the qualifications of electors particps tinr IN md
for nomination to BE- voted for At saId
primary election; to preacribs the number and |
manner OF choosing commissioner who shau |
preside over and conduct said primary eIectIon: |
70 provide for the dsfraying the sxpsnsss Of sad
SECTION; to provide the duties Of olcsrs to whom
lssarns Arc made: to prescribe what ars o0snses /
AGAINST and To provide penalties for Violation
conflict fherewith.'
Resolved. further. That this cell BE- published
or - least thirty days before the date Of said |
Urinary 10 the o@cial journal Of each pariah IN
ne distrlct II there be none. then BY postinG In
nrse eonspicuous public PLACES In said parishes.
hceoived. further. That for the purpoee o. In
ormation. sections II and II Of the Act aforsssjd
'rovsde that all dssirng to become candid tee A.
aid primary shall Ale with the Secrstary of sfnts
'risten notifications of their Intentions within
westy days hon the Issuance Of this cans. Julv
49, vs.sh soties shall b accompanied BY .
On motion, duly seconded the COMMITTEES sd
burned subisct 70 call Of the chairman.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1906-07-07
Official Proceedings of Police
Jury OF Grant Parish.

uAy Va OEd0t faf1Sn.
The police jury of Grant parish me,
with all members present except r.
II. West, and John Randolph, pres.
ident, in the chair.
The minutes Of the previous meet.
were read and approved.
The following officers were then
elected:
John Randolph. president.
w. Il. Clarke, clerk.
VIM. LaCroix. treasurer.
n. q. Goodwin. parish printer.
On motion OF W. l.. Johnson the
Boyce ferry lease was extended for
two years longer. at the price of $27O
per annum. to w. z. Hickman. the
present lessee.
On motion of w. l.. johnson the
fine of Frank Hamilton for carryinr
concealed weapons on account of
quarantine duty was ordered return
ed.
On motion Of Sam Johnson, Sec
onied by Mr.. Drewett, 500 was an
propriated for account of silver SER
vice to he given To U. S. Battlesbip
Louisiana. named in honor of the
State.
The following claims were allowed:
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1906-07-07
Modest Claims Often Cavrv tha
Most Conviction.

When Maxim, the famous gun invent
or, placed his gun before committee OF
judges. be stated its carrying power to
be much below what he felt sure the gun
would accomplish. The result Of the
trial was therefore surprise, instead of
disappointment. 1t is the same with
manufacturers OF Chamberlain's Collie,
Cholera and Diarrhoea Remedy. They
do not publicly boast OF nil this remedy
will accomplish, but prefer to let the nsess
make the statements. What they do
claim, is that it will positively cure diar-
sheoea, dyslntery. pains in the stomach
and bowels and has never been known to
fail. For sale by Valley Drug Store.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1906-07-07

Notice.
Notice Of a bin to prohibit drink
stands and eale of drinks at Ebenerey
Camp GrOuud.
Notice 10 hereby given that, after
regal publication hereof. we will cauoe
an Act to be introduced Ia the Geuer-
NJ Assembly Of louisiana to prohibit
the running Of all kinds Of drink
stands and to prohibit the sale Of
AL kinds Ut drink within the AREA Of
the land owned and controlled BY
the trustees OF the Et'eneser Camp
Ground. and within the area If eirhf
hundred yards Of the said land Owned
ny said trustees, and to provide q pen
atty therefor. Signed
X. +. HARRISON.
HY. II. MCCAIN,
j. H. McNEELY.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1906-07-07

while retureing from the Grand Army
Encampment at Washington City. :
comrade froa Elgin, Ill.,, was taken with
choleru merbus and was in critical con.
dition, says Mr.. j. e. Houghland. Of
Eldon. Iowa. II gaveh him OhamberIsiu's
Colo, Cholera and Diarrhoea Remedy
ana believe saved HE life. 1 have been
engaged for ten years in immigration
work and conducted many parties to the
south and west. / always carry this
remedy and have ueed It successfully on
many occasions" Sold by Valley Drug
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1906-07-07
Bowel Gem plaint In ch,ldren.

During the summer months children
are subject to disorders of the bowels
which should receive careful attention
as soon rs the unnatural looseness OF the
bowels appear. The best medicine in use
for bowel complaint is Chamberlain's
Collie. Cholera and Diarrhoea Remedy a.
1t promptly controls the uDnoturaI loose-
ness OF the bowels. For sale by Valley
Drug Store.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1906-07-07

James II. Walker, of Pollock, VIII
pay until further notice. delivered nj
Pollock or any railroad depot In
Grant or Rapides parishes the fol-
lowing prices Orempty sucks: Good
cat. &c; good chop, &c: stained or
damaged by holes 0ne-hah price.
For further particulars address me
at Pollock. JAS. II. WALKER.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1906-07-07

On Tuesday Of this week. Mr.. John

On Tuesday Of this week. Mr.. John
Randolph. president Of the police jury
Invited the board, its clerk. the parish
treasurer. the parish printer, to take
dinner with him at the LeSage hotel.
Mine host. J. v. LeSage. set out a
most excellent dinner for the occa-
sion, and 1t was served with all the
skill for which this hostelrie is quite
famous. Those present were. John
Randolph. W. L. johnson. L. M. Fu-
trell. w. NJ. Tully, Sam Johnson, J. +.
Drewett. w. b. Clarke. Vim. LaCroix
and H. G. GOODWIN.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1906-07-07
Judicial Sale.
In the Matter u Dick Crukshsuk.
lntordict,

In the Matter u Dick Crukshauk
lnterdict.
In 18Th Distinct Court, Grant Parish. Louisiana.
Pursuant TO the advice Of q family me.tip~.
and an order Of the court TO ne dirscted. vii
o9er for sale the following described property :
All that portion Of the De 4 Of ~ Z n -. q
I. N. Il. : ". which lie north Of bsrou Rie.
oiet g, containing about az acres.
$40 property hsing appraised It $40 pr scrs
10 be ascsrtazned b. : measurement.
Ierns eaeh-6ale to take place On Szfurd.v
July e. leo6. on the plnce-at the hoose 81 Dief
.Cruskshank- MATTE CRUIKSHASK-.
~ Curafrix
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1906-07-07
COMr, La.

Dear Sir: Two years ago. Mr..
Grant Smith, Erie. Pa, painted three
frame houses. and the wood ork of
n brick house.
The painter estimated SIG 80 for
the paint, lead-and-Oil.
He bought Devoe $97 4Oand return
ed $1l SO. Saved $3l loon the paint.
Don't know the cost OF the work.
By the rule, the saving of labor
would he from $50 tn $50.
TN all. from 80 to $40.
This is the tale, as 1t comes from
Messrs- W. F. Nick 4 Son, our agents
there for 10 years.
Yours truly.
% F. W. DEvOE & Co.
+. $. Valley Drug Store sells our
paint.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1906-07-07

Timber Land Notice.
United States Land Of3ce.
New Orleans. Louisiana,


New Orleans. Louisiana,
May q. 1906.
Notes u hereby given that in compli-
lance with the provisions Of the Act Of
Congress Of June 8 1e76, entitled IAN
act for the sale OF timber lands in the
States Of California. Oregon, Nevada,
and Warrington territory" as extended
to oil the public land States by act OF
August 4, 1891, Ada williams. OF George
town. ,ounty Of Grant, State OF Louisi-
ana, has this day fled in this once her
sworn statement No. 100, for .he pur.
ehaee II the v hf Of sw az OF sec. Il To
n, Il w, and viii o(Ier proof 30 show
that the land sought 10 mocs valuable
Tor it, timber or stone than for aRrlcuIt-
ural purposes. add toessablish her claim
to said land before Clerk OF Court 1t Col
tax. La, on Thursday. The 30th dav q
August, 1901.
She names - witnesses w. n. Tuilv
and c. z. Tully. Of Geosgetowu, La, add
VIM. Ulmer and Marshal Roiburn. 81
Zi0n, L..
Any and sll persoss claiming Adversely
the above described lands are requested
70 ME their claims 10 this once on or H.
lore the 30th day OF August. 1905.
WALrRR l. CoHxN, Register.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1906-07-07
Tragic Finish.

A watohman's neglect permitted . leak
in the great North Sea dyke. which a
child's finger could have stopped, to be-
come q ruinons break. devastating 90
entire PROVINCE OF Holland. Unlike man.
ner Kenneth McIver. of Vanceboro, Me-,
permitted little cold to go unnotio~d
until tragic fini b was only averted by
Or: Kings New Discovery. he writes:
"Ihree doctors gave me mp to die 1T lung
infiamstion, caused by neglected cold
but DIR. Kings New Discovery saved my
life." Guaranteed best cough and cold
cure. at Crescent Drug Store. s0c and
81. Trial buttle free.