The National tribune., 1906-03-08


line of duty, and yield no sort of COM
pensation for the trouble involved
Hence 1t is often hard for them to main
tain the high standard of politeness
which the Government sets up for its
officials. The Postmaster at Hopkins
vile, KY, received the following letter
from a former Kentuckian, who now
lives in Oregon: Mr. Postmaster: Will
you please hand this note to some old
Tobacco raiser. l want dollars worth
of homemade Tobacco from old KY.
for chewing. l want as old Tobacco as
there is and as good. 1 want to pay
what it is worth. Would like If it was
twisted. Whoever gets this note answer
at once. / used to live in KY, in liv-
old maid or a widowed lady Bout 35
or 40, tell them to write to me if they
want to change there name to a better
one. l was married once in Ky. / got
my licens at smithland, was married at
loves chapel, close to caryville. L got
fine lady; 1 want mother one from old
KY, they are the people and most re-
spected." Then he added as a post
script: Say, lady, if you do write send
me yore picture. 1 am this way, quick
sales and good profits. My wife has
Bin dead years. L have no children.
By By
Patrons Fads.
Postmasters are the special victims
of fads. One of the latest Is the purple
stamp. 1t must have been the purple
poster rage that produced the purple
postage stamp, and it is a three-cent
one. A heartless, unsympathetic Gov
ernment does not make them in two
cent styles. Yet to be thoroughly and
harmoniously purple you must have a
purple stamp.
Every one can buy cheapIy the dainty
linen paper of the beautiful lavender
hue, scent it with violets or heliotrope
sachet-the purpleness of either of
those scents would be sure to penetrate
even the most adamant soul-and use
purple ink to inscribe the important
love messages of the business-like COM
mand, but the three-cent purple post
age stamp costs three cents. What per-
manent effect this flood of purpleness
will have upon society remains to be
seen. Scientists say that visible colors
affect the morals. What of the purple
craze? ....s r
Very few Postmasters of fourth-class
offices receive pay enough to justify
giving their ,entire attention to their
official duties. They must join some
other business with that of handling the
mails, the stamps and the postal orders
This combination has its drawbacks.
A characteristic incident, with an
which was kept in drug store. The
clerk alone was on duty at the time
these things happened, and he was en-
gagged in showing bottles of perfumery
to q pair of very black women who
weren't very certain what they wanted
or whether they wanted anything.
One of the black women would point
to bottle in the open case, and the
clerk would haul the bottle out.
That's white, lilac" the clerk
would say, "and 1t costs so cents"
Then the two black women would
gaze reflectiveIy at the bottle, and then
at the clerk. and then at each other,
and point out another bottle in the
case, and the performance would b.
gone through again.
While 1t was in progress the store
began to fill up. There was fat man
at the post-office desk, groan-
ing every time the black women asked
to see another bottle of perfumery, and
on the desk. He wanted to
send special-delivery letter, and he
needed a stamp for it. There were four
women with letters in their hands, and
the things that they looked, in unison,
at the black women asking the patient
clerk to show them more bottles of eX-|
tract were something violent.
A thin, jerky man rushed in. He
looked as If something of extreme in
terest to him had happened at home
He had bunch of prescriptions in his
hand, and when he saw the performance
through which the black women and
the clerk were going he began to gnaw
on the ends of the prescriptions and to
growl under his breath as he leaned
on one leg and then on the other
How much is uh bottle lax data
one?" one of the black women inquired,
pointing to a larger sized bottle of
patchOuli.
"Seventy-five cents" replied the
clerk, with marvellous patience, picking
the bottle out. "Wild Rose, same size,
same price
The black women gazed at the clerk
and at the bottle, and at each other.
and the people in the store groaned
in unison.
Two more women with letters in their
hands came in, and then came another
man with a mad desire for a
5pecial-delivery stamp
By actual count there were IA fero-
cious human beings in the store to buy
when one of the black wo-
men, after 20 minutes inspection of
The shops stock Of perfumes, said:
We'll, All guess yo'-all's too high in
yo' prices. We dun thought we could |
git whut we wanted fo' 10 cents"
Whereupon they marched out of the |
store, and the IA ferocious human be- |
ngs fought for the clerks first atten- |
ion.
"Freak Matter. |
Freak" mail matter is one of the |
standing annoyances of all postal Off
,ialS and employees. One of the worst |
,ases is that of an ordinary raw (not
'ipe) hens egg which travelled safely |
rom st. Louis to Chicago in the mails,
lccording to the Chicago papers
The curious part of the incident lies
II the fact that the egg was absolutely |
lninjured in any manner whatever, not
the many times it was
handled in transit and the fact that it
lad no covering whatever. How II was
ver accepted by the st. Louis post-office
Is q mystery.
AT any rate, the egg was received |
as it was transported, with the
tamp Cancelled in the ordinary manner.
The records show that odd epistles
re not always Intentionally "freaked."
After the battle of Colenso, there was
ound grasped in the stiffening hands
II dead soldier piece OF leather with
dying message scrawled upon 1t with
stump of pencil. 1t was layer of
he sole of the dead mans boot, which
lad probably been ioosened with much
and which he had contriyed
o rip off. 1t safely reached the poor
ellow's family in England.
From the. Philippines, too some Curl
us letters have been received by the
riends of American soldiers fightingt
u those islands. One of the most in
,enious was a piece of native bamboo
bout foot long. on which an address
ad been carved with a nepkpifa The