The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-05-05
VISIT no COOKING scHooL.
Susie sorFowfuI Has Trouble Applying
the knowledge She Acquired.
To the Editor of the State Journal:

To the Editor of the State Journal:
Having recently attended a cooking
school of the free-for-all class, in
which the most glorious things were
deity compounded while you wait,
and the audience was invited to walk
up and partake of the results, Tam so
bubbling over with enthusiasm about
the same that I am moved to divide up
with what the State Journal is pleased
to cali The More or Less Gentle
given to all who WELD a pen is to
Look into thy heart and write but
how appropriately you could vary the
decree to one who can look into that
organ a little lower and slightly to the
right of the heart, just after having
partaken of the choicest morsels of
the culinary art. The writer is then
so sure to be full of her subject.
Midst such plethora of good things
on the menu, it is difficult to choose,
but let US begin with that artistic
triumph known as .'planlxed shad.' To
be sure there are q few minor incl
dentals connected Herewith, the most
important of which is to first catch
your shad: and in a state whose pfsca-
torial limit is the festive catfish, this
may seem an obstacle that is we'll
nigh insuperable, but a shad you must
have by some hook or crook and then
you can proceed to plank it. Hadn't
you always supposed that any board
wider than a bed-slat would pass
muster as plank? Mercy on US.
what ignorance there is among the
massest The shad plank, dear reader,
must be round, of kiln-dried, highly
polished, quarter-sawed oak. and
should have been previously prepared
for you by being delicately Drowned,
like the smokers meerschaum, I sup
pose: and that suggests the establish
ing of a new and noble profession. Just
think what a blissful life work for
Weary Willie that would be,-brOwn-
ing shad planks and incidentally con-
Stunning his shadshiD ad libitum and ad
infinituml
ANY touch of the unattainable about
the dish under discussion was speedily
dispelled by the announcement that 1t
was to be garnished with potatoes.
Now, indeed, felt the ground under
nv feet could even dare to ASK for
information; SO, with a temerity born
of an earnest and inquiring spirit, I
questioned. would you ever boil
potato with the jacket on2' With
slight elevation of the eyebrows and
sweet smile of commiseration, the
madame answered, Indeed no. from
which succinct reply I infer that no
self respecting potato would ever
dream of appearing any less than
deeply decolIete- The Mashed MUIR
plies before US, however, were to be
put through a pastry bag with rose
tube. to still further remove all traces
of plebeianism But behold the COM
pleted masterpiece! Bordered with
potato roses. garnished with lemon
and parsley and steaming on his
throne, this noble subject for an Isaac
Walton was generously and trium-
phantly set out before the famished
horde to be devoured. Shades of
Epicures how they did eatl The poor
little shaddie must have shudderingly
thought:
''since SO soon I'm to be done for.
I wonder what I was begun for"
twas like the snowflake on the river.
One moment seen, then gone forever
Nothing but the quartersawed, kiln
dried plank remained.
Now, ITO summarize. as the SER