The San Francisco call., 1906-09-16

IN ONT forget to speak a good
ssss %sss 'ss ...ss ne r5ss 5as'1ss asrsss. ss:.
as he gayly waved his hand
from the deck Of the royal yacht Vic
toria and Albert. at Cowes, TO Lord
Harmsworth-Nort clamberipg up
the ladder OF an Atlantic transport in
London harbor.
I hear there are plenty Of heiresses
still left in the American jungle yards.
and II we haven't enough lords to go
round I'll create some more,"
The paper trust is grateful to King
Edward for the deluge that has been
penned in answer TO Lord NorthcIiff's
loyal stand-up by lovely American
brides, who hubbub for their bubbles
on general principles. but with scanky
knowledge OF the real reasons that
make the English article more de-
sira5le than their own.
Those who see the British lion in
his best clothes, chaperoned by the
Duchess OF Marlborough. Mrs. Arthur
Paget or Mrs. Ronalds. at the Carlton.
the Savoy or the Princes know that
he is the superb fellow Hawthorne
describes as a being OF solid beef with
generous streaks Of tallow, who in
stinctively arouses thoughts OF steaks
and srloins. He makes US look like
pretty poor stockyard meat-all ears
and vertebrac and pin feathers.
But IL might be interesting to the
shutouts 10 know why he is consid-
cred 10 be the Best Husband int the
World.
The joys OF medieval English life
have been treated so exhaustIvely by
Victor Hugo in the preface To The
Man Who Laughs that no one need
delve where he has dived. and il is
only Of modern times that we will
speak.
OF course. as every one knows. peo-
pie are divided into upper. middle and
lower classes-upper-up middle
upper, lower upper. upper middle, mid
die, middle-upper-m middle upper mid
dle-middle and so on, till confusion
follows as great as the puzzle Of
Hindu castes.
From long observation I would state
that the husband possesses the same
sterling qualities in each division
Scratch Russian and you will find q
Tartar.
ways turn up wife beater
A former Duchess. who lived be-
hind the gray pillars near Hyde Park
Gate, was often so castigated that she
was laid up for weeks AZ a time. but
was given the rare compliment Of per-
sonal visits from Queen Victoria for
being such q model wife.
An American dowager Duchess is
said 70 have enjoyed the respect of
the royal family for the same reasonA
a model wife" evidently one who will
let Ina DO hanythin TO 'er" and not
complain.
II is well known that ladies who
were not model wives were never re-
ceived at Queen Victoria's court
heard OF a hunting squire Of the
OLD school who every time his wife was
ill used TO amuse himself by galloping
his horse up the broad abbey stairs
with the dogs at his heels and leap
the FIVE barred bed. just to frighten
her. laughing to see the pack scramble
over her as she covered beneath the
sheets
She was sweet lady. but had a
rather nervous and timid expression,
which grew on her.
Lord Beaconsfeld declared that his
wife never could remember which came
first the Greeks or the Romans, but
was worthy soul"
A friend Of mine going to meet a
vice-regal party at a Paris railway
station found the lord far ahead and,
asking. Where is -2~ was told
-oh, she's coming along with the
traps" and soon greeted a pallid lady
just risen from an exemplary bed
and canes
do let me take that bag,~