Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-07-22
Etiquette Of the
American Girl
Copyright 1909. by Jerome k Jerome,

Copyright. lBod, by jerome X Jerome.)
- Ow does she do it?" That is
what the European girl
wants to know. The Ameri-
y. can grill She comes over
here. and. as a British ma
tron, reduced to slang by force of indigna-
ton. once exclaimed TO me: You'd think
the whole blessed show belonged to her."
The European girl is hampered by her rela-
lives; she has to account for her father;
40 explain away II possible. her grand
father. The American girl sweeps them
aside. Don't you worry about them.'' she
says to the lord chamberlain ITS awful
ly good Of you, but don't you fuss your
self I'm looking after my old people.
That's my department. What I want you
10 DO is just listen to what 1 am saying
and then hustle around. can fill up your
time all right myself" Her father may
be a soap boiler. her grandmother may
have gone out scrubbing. That's all
right" she says to her ambassador,
They're not coming. You just take my
card and tell the king that when he's got
t. few minutes to spare I'll be pleased to
see him And the extraordinary thing is
that a day or two afterward the invitation
arrives. A modern writer has said that
I'm Murlken" is the civis romanus sum
OF the present day womans world.
The late King of Saxony did. l be -Ieve.
on one occasion make a feeble protest at
being asked to receive the daughter of
retail .bOOtmaker. The young lady, nom
plused for the moment, telegraphed to her
father In Detroit. The answer came back
next morning: Cant call it selling; prac-
Ucally giving them away. See advertise
meut" The lady was presented as the
daughter Of an eminent philanthropist. 1t
Is due 70 her to admit that, taking her as
EIr q iE a
gain TO European society. Her influence
is against convention and in favor of sim
plicity. One Of her greatest charms in the
eyes OF the European man Is that she lis
tens to him. l cannot say whether il does
her any good. Maybe she does not remem-
Der 1t all, but while you are talking she
does give you her attention. The English
woman does not always. She greets you
pleasantly enough. I've so often wanted
10 meet you she says. Must you really
go7" 1t strikes you as sudden; you had
no intention OF going for hours, but the
hint Is too plain to be ignored. You are
preparing TO agree that you really must
when, looking around, you gather the last
remark was not addressed to you, but to
another gentleman who is shaking hands
with her Now, perhaps we shall be able
to talk for five minutes" she says I've
often wanted TO say that l shall never
forgive you. You have been simply hor-
rid"
Again you are confused until you jump
TO the conclusion that the latter portion
OF the speech Is PROBABLY INTENDED LOT
quite another party with whom at the mo-
ment, her back toward you, she Is engaged
in a whispered conversation. When he is
gone she turns again toward you. But the
varied expressions that pass across her
face while you are discussing with her the
morality of the fiscal policy bewilder you.
When, explaining your own difficulty in
arriving at a conclusion, you remark that
Great Britain is an island she roguishly
shakes her head. 1t is not that she has
forgotten her geography; 1t Is that she Is
conducting a conversation by signs with
lady at the other end OF THE room. When
you observe that the working classes must
be fed she smiles archly while murmuring,
''Oh, do you really think SOP You are
about to say something strong on the sub
ject OF pure food. Apparently she has dis
appeared. You find that she is reaching
around behind you to tap new arrival
with her fan.
Now. the American girl looks at you and
Just listens to you with her eyes fixed on
you all the time You gather that. as far
as she Is concerned. the rest of the COM
pany are passing shadows. She wants to
hear what you have TO say about the fiscal