New-York tribune., 1906-06-01
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

The recent criticism of THE Tailor and Cutter
regarding the seams and buttons in a portrait of
Lord Roberts. and the rural criticism OF the
driver in a picture i'm the Iowa Capitol recall the
expert objection 10 Turner's painting of a locomo-
tive. A correspondent of London paper who
saw the picture In 1885 tells us how a friend took
him see IT, pointing its beauties But the rail-
way expert cried at why! the train is run
ming the wrong track!
Al the Play.-"she must be fifty If she's a day
How can she manage to play the part Of young
well. YOU know. she young girl once
Brooklyn Life
new use has been found for old ghosts as this
tale in The London Truth" shows: Some three
years ago imperturbabIe American bought
property in England. The house had accumulated
historical associations durin.: many generations
and especially celebrated for it's ghosts
For three months the American owner. his
family and guests. were much annoyed by appari-
tons and unnatural noises. and. indeed the matter
became troublesome. particularly
could be induced to remain, that he determined TO
obtain control over the spirit tenants BY what
means he cOntrtved TO obtain that control is un-
known. but he has completely tanned the ghosts
that they only now ''materiaze" to his
guests. On wet afternoon they are occasionally
ordered to appear in the drawing room. and even
dane. and their presence is often required in
the nursery when the children tired of playing
with their ordinary toys. Thus another old-fash-
toned institution has been robbed of it's terrors
Nagsbym1ou,re naturally pessimistic. don't
think ever saw you look cheerful
Cars6y-Ah! That's easily explained
Carsby You didn't know before 1 was mar
The wife of a certain wealthy Westerner has
some of the habits of Mrs. Partington Her friends
are frequently amused by her mistakes Once some
one ventured remark 20 her according 10
"Harper's Weekly" that General So-and- So was
certainly oelicose man. The Western lady's eyes
buged with astonishment You don't tell met.
she exclaimed "of course having met him T
couldn't But thought from his picture that
he was very thin!'
THE BEST SUBSTITUTE
who has s0H n hob6gF o5iS snqa De allowed to marry
Amanda through the Ivelong night
For sleep has vanished from me quite
Since i have been possessed of love
sad thought Expresses me.
And partially my ardor damps-
How much more charming YOU would be-
II you collected postage stamps!
goddess well might grudge your grace.
a fairy envy you your form;
The sweet expression on your face
Speaks of a heart that's fond and warm
There's poetry within your eyes.
And music in your limpid laughs
You'd be, naeed a peerless prize
IL you went in for autographs
Forgive me II I thus allude
TO what If your one olly flaw.
If one on your 1uq' ndliIaspG@ tlinh me 2 TnTS
This sound advice trust you II take.
When II is whispered I'm your ear
Make up your mind at once To make
hobby of hubby, dear
London Tribune
In English village there lived n dull wt,ss
boy. II was a great local Joke offer him the
choice OF a penny and three-pennv niece Tyha
lad invariably chose the penny. A stranger one dav
him choose the penny rather than the three
penny bit. and asked him for the reason
rs 1t because the penny is iarger?' the stranyar
asked.
Nav" was the response. mot causs 4, 4. m.
biggest But II took the three-penny hit th.vsa
soon stop offering IL.
Possbly.-"Why is it, she whispered an th. .,,
of the ceremony. that the bridegroom always iooL
as II he couldn't call his soul his own7' ''Aa
Probably replied her brother tits becau..
from that moment he really cant"-CAthouc assnde
ard and TtuaAA