Smyrna times., 1906-04-25
BillggS' Bargain
By
LAURA ALTON PAYNE
Copyright, 1905, by McCliTc, Phillips 6 Co.

an oasis of thick blond hair on Bings'
well shaped head.
Whitlock grinned.
Mammals pet mustn't be naughty"
said the pretty widow, turning her
brown eyes apOlOgetically on Bings.
Come to mamma, dearie. Mr. Bings
isn't used to babies"
But the dimpled cherub, otherwise
Baby MOflatt, who had purposely and
after many backslidings climbed upon
the rustic seat occupied by Bings, for
whom she had evinced Il decided par
tiality from the start, only snuggled
the closer to the secretly delighted
Bings and coOed, Baby 'Ove Bings,"
then as Il happy afterthought, Mann
ma 'ove Bings," at which frank and
wholly unexpected revelation of her
small daughter the pretty widows face
rivaled Bings'
WhitlOck guffawed "NOw's your
chance Bings," he urged, with mali
cious levity at his rivals discontinue.
But Bings. with a hasty adieu, fled,
leaving the cherub disconsolate.
Bings metaphOrically kicked himself
all the way home for not taking ad-
vantage of the best opportunity he had
| ever had, even if it was before the
sneering WhitlOck, and for his cow
ardly desertiOn of the pretty widow to
! WhitlOck's caustic raillery.
Bings paused at his own gate and
gazed miserably at the big silent house.
He shut his eyes moment and imag-
ined he saw the pretty widow and the
cherub sitting on the front porch. 1t
was a blissful vision, but Bings felt
that it would never become a blissful
reality unless miracle happened.
Bings was a bachelor, Bings was big
and blond and bald, Bings was bash
ful-in fact. Bings was Il whole swarm
of "B'S." He narrowly escaped being
a beauty, with his baby complexion
and innocent blue eyes. His size was
the only thing that saved him from this
terrible fate. Moreover, Bings was
bargain fiend. No woman could seer
a bargain sale farther off than cOul(
Billy Bings. Incidentally Billy was
the climax to Bings' woes. But no per
suasiOn on his part could convince hi
friends of the absurdity of calling
six foOter Billy.
Bings' bachelorhOod was a condition
of neither birth nor achievement
was thrust upon him. During his evo
luton into that state there had beel
any one of a dozen maids and widow
that Bings would have been only to-
happy to have endowed with half hi
worldly goods but for his excessive
bashfulness. Never yet had he bee
able to screw his courage up to tn
point of proposal though he had mad
almost superhuman efforts in that d
rection.
I This seemed a pity, for Bings wa
r undenably cut out for a Benedict. II
d, thought all women angels and a
4 babies cherubs.
I. As he started uptown on the m'
n,ertous morning after his precipitat
FIGHT Dings had a particular cherub
mind-a pretty. brown eyed, dimple
! cheiub that he would have given ha
/ he was worth to possess and the Otht
% half to possess the cherub's prett
brown eyed mother. But so far ever
l. glance from Mrs Jessie MOffatts r
/, guish eyes had produced the unfort
nate eract of instantaneous paralys
ef poor Bings' tongue. so that he cou
:. only stand dumb or blush and star
s. mer like any silly schoolb0y.
30 This was not the first time by al
means that Bings had performed tn
metaphorical feat. 1t had been at lea
a semiweekly occurrence for sever
months past Each time Bings vow
that the next time he would not q
the fool But he did. He had reach
the point where the inevitable ment
feat was copiously punctuated with
no vigorous ejaculation that would ha
shocked the pretty widow had s
heard it.
Bings felt his helplessness bitter
So absorbed was he in this thought
he picked his way along the sha
street that he failed to observe
widow a block or so ahead of him.
deep gloom enveloped Bings' soul Il
bright June morning.
"Corfound itv' he muttere1.
- something doesn't happen soon Tlr'-
"Going, going-gone"
Blngs priclled up his ears and h
tened his steps. An auction. and
- not to know 1t? Turning a corner,
~ came full upon a familiar scene j
as q table was knocked down to
highest bidder. Bings' eyes gloa
over the unusual display of househ
foal goods spread before him.
Fifty centsv' bid voice in
crowd as the auctioneer held up
ired article. It was Whitlocks voice. BIZ
Of Of wrath famed up, and before he
ysrd time to think he was bidding furiol
kes, against his rival. Fast in the griI
"bargain fever" and whetted on
- Whitlock. Bings rapidly became
anne SCISSOR Of various articles that wer
can as much use to him at that periot
his existence as a celestial harp al
mus pair of wings. Had Bings intercel
the exchange of winks between "
lock and the auctioneer he might
J. been more cautious. AS 1t was,