Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-10-27

An old-time southern darby called at the
ONCE of Engineer Commissioner Biddle the
other day. Opening the door just enough
70 allow his body to squeeze through. ana
leaning heavily on stick. he hoobieo up
to the desk OF Secretary Garges. bowling
profusely at every step.
II hope 1 sees you-all well. was ms
5alutatfop as Iookin' for job as a
watcherman an l wuz tole dat dis Is de
place to cum.
Take a seat, uncle" said the secretary,
and tell me of your qualifications 10 HI
that somewhat onerous position.
Say dat agin boss said he. scratching
Ibis head.
II mean what experience have you mad In
that line
vas indeedy. Use wukked in the bitches for
thirty year or mo-, but de boss dun dS-
chaged me coz l cayn't hannie dc PICK as
rss' as dem yung buck niggahS on de JoD.
an says Ise too ole. Vas, sub. hits fac
dat | am ole, but yit l has to live. an
don wonter go to the po' house seems
dat dey amt much use in dis worl ION an
ole man no mob. Dem young nlggans cum
uuten de schools wifi der book larnin, can
writ DER name an such like. and takes de
bread outen de mouf Of us Do' ole folks
dat nevah had dem vantaSes. Bero de
wah / wuz a han in de cotton fields an
Use been had wukker all my III.
"A IL.
address and you shall have the first watch
mans job that becomes vacant, SAID MI
Garses.
'aThankee. boss. thankee-de Lawd tax
cyar of yeh''-and he hcbbied out again.
X y
.There is a certain dissimilarity." said
a man full of book news. between the
names of Simeon Ford and Sewel Ford.
The two men are quite unlike in appear
ance they are in no way related ana III
fact are total strangers to each other
Yet chance, every now ana tnen hikes
their various affairs strangely.
Mr.. Simeon Ford. besides conducting
n hotel. is as every one knows. humorist
and an author. Mr.. Sewell Ford happens 10
he an author too. and. as demonstrated py
his latest book Shorty McCabe. hu-
morist also. Occasionally in print MT.
Simeon Ford is credited with writing Mr.
Seweu Fords books. and the latter mas
been astonished to read of himself as rum
ming hotel.
"Ahout a year ago Sewel Ford became
q, resident of Rye, n. Y. He had lived there
only a short time before he discovered tnat
one of his neghbors was simeon roTo'
The revelation was made over the tele-
Hello said a voice. is this Sewen
Ford?'
was
"'WeIl' went on the voice. this is simeon
Ford Some ones sent me your meat Dill.
Good! Why don't you pay IT.?
81 will If you'll pay mine said simeon.
"At last accounts the bargain nau not
been concluded"
There is an old cannon ball In the ante
room Of the District Engineer Commission
er's office which is matter of intense In
terest to visitors. Where did this come
from" they ask, and then proceed TO Eft II
to ascertain its weight.
ct Is remarkable" says Mr.. Garges. Col:
Riddles secretary, how many people Will
try 10 do stunts with that ball. DIR. I'm
dali. the secretary to the board Oh COM
missioners comes In every morning before
opening the mail to test his muscular pow
er ard see whether he is equal 10 MS oHl-
cial task of handling the daily complaints
With Maj. Harding. former assistant 10
Col! Biddle. 1t was a habit to iifs the Dali
from the table by simply grabbing II from
the top Ia feat only one other man mas
ACCOMPLISHMENT and when he had done SO
he felt that he was in good physical con-
dition. Others often try to hold the ball
at arms length. and when they ran LOOK
crestfa!len and mutter. L lister couio 90
it, .
Stories have been written of this ball
that 1t was fired by Gen. Ross at the Cap
ltol building when he paid that unweicome
visit to Washington In lSl2. and tnat IL
was nodded in England during the reign
OF King George As a matter OF TACT, the
old twenty four-pounder was dug by a
contractor from beneath the foundation OF
an old building next to Epiphany Churcn
or G. street which was, II Is believed. once
the site of foundry, and 1t was given TO
the building inspector as relic. Now II
performs the peaceful duty or a paper
weight. and as a side issue poses as a
curiosity
much has been said and written" said
Gen +. S. Dodge. late paymaster general
OF the army. about paper work in the
army Admitting that 1t Is excessive and
oftirues seemingly unnecessary, yet 1t must
be remembered that the efficiency OF the
army like the efficiency Of everything
else In this world. depends on the dollar.
And that dollar after 1t has been appro-
priated must be accounted for. 1t mat
tiers not how II has been discussed or ex-
b. his papers that the disbursements were
authorized and In accordance with law or
he must make good. 1t is submitted, there
fore that the average officer cannot know
too much about the rules. etc, govern
ing such expenditures. and 1t Is further
submitted that Il Is unfair and unjust TO
impose dshuTsing duties upon an officer
who has no previous experience IN such
matters an opportunity 10 learn them"
y x x x
James l.. Pugh. jr.. assistant corporation
counsel boasts of his success as a farmer
In Montgomery county. Md. Several years
ago when the popular employe of the Dis
trict conided To his friends that he was 60