The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1906-11-16
ALL ON ACCOUNT
OF A Fish
Matrimonial Dialogue After One
Month Of Married Life

This fish Is bad. Ethel" said 4
surveyed a piece of ancientlookin
plaice.
Ethel looked up from her plate wit
start, "Bad2 she said Il thin
you must be mistaken, jack
Not much room for mistake here
The fish doth protest too much"
You have had bad day downtown,
retorted Ethel, and in consequence
are somewhat critical and bad-tem
porcd"
M One doesn't need TO be very critica
10 discover fact that is 80 obvious
The FISH isn't bad, and you have
no right to say 50. It's reflection OF
me-
Nothing Of the sort. It's a reaec
tion on the fish dealer
ITS a reflection on my housekeep'
ing. And | got three prizes for do
nestle economy at school and ! have
studied the subject deeply ever since
we were engaged. And here you are
finding fault after we have been mar
riad only a month" And Ethel burst
into tears.
Wen. there il no need to make such
fuss over small matter
lis not a small matter TO be found
fault with by ones husband, And III
thought you 50 different from other
mem"
Here followed another rainstorm
And thought Won We're a deal pret-
tier and had more common sense than
the average woman
Ethel nnconsciously mt a rebelli-
Gus curl into position at this remark.
You married me simply because
You wanted housekeeper. I can or
der the fish, but | can't order the
weather she moaned as she proceed
cd TO drench lace handkerchief
could not help but notice with a Ger
tain amount of satisfaction, that she
was one of the very few women who
can cry without making their noses
red
Don't behave like a spoiled child
said. Do try and be reasonable"
The law interferes when a man
beats his wife, continued Ethel but
when he treats her with refined cru
city she has no remedy" And the lace
handkerchief went into play again
II think | had better leave you to
yourself for a short time, | said land .
then, perhaps, when return you wiIl .
be cgathed in your right mind / viii
look in at the club
Ethel sat bolt upright at the men
ton Of the odious word
Club she said and her eyes
blazed. Yes, go TO the club, stay at
the club, live at the club, and may
the club fall in upon al those heart
less husbands who have deserted their
heartbroken wives"
"A nice, pious wish for a four weeks
old wife
ITS a fate too good for such con
duct"
If during my absence" / said Won
find time hang heavily on Won hands
Won might read Much Ado About
Nothing.
Thanks for the advice" retortcd
Ethel Men are not the Indispensable
creatures they appear to think !
shall have no difficulty in occupying
my time. / too will look in at my
club
Ethel said. sternly. 4 was not
aware you belonged to a club
That's quite likely" she replied in
an exasparating tone of voice. "Bclla
Eastwood belongs to the Doves. and
will look her up This evening. II wiu
be a good opportunity to have my
name put down for membership II Is
Is well to have outside interests when
,ne's husband is merely a Iodeer.
AT this remark ! staiked out of the
'oom and closed the door with a deal
If energy
On entering the club ! met a fat
selfish bachelor am now of the
opinion that an bachelors are selfish
Looking rather hippy Carlton, hc
.ried. Doesn't double harness suit
'ou? ] notice am son neWi married
nen sink back hc,o after 4 .ew weeks
IF matrimonial strife
| refraincl from kicking jho aui-
mated barrel and PASSED into tbo bil
iard room After MISSING couple uf
usy carom and nearly icing pc.a !
If The cloth, ! threw tbe whole b..t
loss M i'm discusi and returned home 7
wondered huw Ethel Uas cni1tu- d
q