davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal., 1906-01-18
HVMOR or THE DAY


well there's one thing about Nuritch
hes always ready 10 confess ms
Nonsense Why. he's forever Dragging
'sof course. that's just it.''-Phladei-
phia Press.
There is an old proverb that a man
becomes what he eats.
Then suppose all the cannlbals viii
be missionaries in time. Cleveland
Leader
did you know that in a majority Of
the counties IL Kentucky it IS unla"Iui
Wen great scott! a man hasn't got
to live in those counties, has he.'-A4il-
Don't git proud cause things is comm,
sence de ThanksgfviT' turkey were feelin,,
important cause everybody was comm
roun' feedin' him. Washington Star
scorcher-was that man or a woman
we just ran over?
Assistant-Voma guess.
scorcher-oh, then it's all right. vas
wed be disaaaIihed.-c Chicago News.
"old Gotrox has gone bankrupt"
You don't say! What was the
spent all his money trying to learn
how to live the simple life. ."-AIilwaukee
Sentinel.
Fortune Teller examining her palm)-
Beware of strikingly handsome, tall
dark-haired young man.
I've married hinn.-Chicago Tribune.
Some men don't worry" said Uncle
Eben, cause dey got too much sense
got sense enough Washington Star
Tess-T understand May Cutting re-
marked that I looked so much like Miss
Hoamley- -Ritch Isn't she awful?
Jess-Hes, shes always Knocking MISS
Hoamley- -Ritch because she's jealous Of
her.-Philadelphia Press.
so your niece is married2 Did she do
"oh. my. yesl Why. they got money
alone to pay the rent of their fiat for a
year in advance. Chicago Record
Herald.
She'd like to sing. but there are so
He-oh, don't be bashful. You just wait
til you begin and there won't be SO
many.-Judge.
the wise Guy. '.Yes, agreed the Simple
Mug, I'VE can't even get weighed without
tipping the scales Philadelphia Record
Motoring on rural roads-'Hi there.
boy Where viii this road take us2''
Ter JAN, mister. if the constable what's
watching round the bend ketches ye''-
Baltimore American.
Mr.; Younghub-This sponge cake is very
tough. my love.
Mrs Younghub-TIow queer, And told
the man to give me the youngest tender
est sponges he hadi-Cleveland Leader
Harry. did you not hear your mother
call your
Course I did"
Then Then why don't you go to herr
quick she'd drop dead" And Harry went
on with his playing as if nothing dis
turbed his mind.-Albany Journal
SAY. ma" complained the insurance
presidents little boy. why don't You
want me to play with the Bixley chill
dren2"
My dear child. this is something that
you viii understand when you grow
older. Their father Is nothing but
poHcyhOlder Chicago Record Herald
First Man-How do you do?
Second Man-Beg pardon, but you have
the advantage of me
First Man-Yes. ] guess have. Ne
were engaged to the same girl. but you
married her.-Pittsburg Dispatch.
The Topeka state journal., 1906-01-18

To Roosevelt, the Red NIan-Beware
of the bolo of Bryan. the Moro, now
datto of Jolo.-New York Herald.
The Topeka state journal., 1906-01-18

FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT OF
THE ASSOCIATED PRESS EVERY
WEEK DAY AND PUBLISHERS
PRESS REPORT ON SATURDAY
NIGHT FOR THE EDITION FOR
SUNDAY MORNING.
The Topeka state journal., 1906-01-18

Fortune Teller (examining her palm)-
Beware of a striklngly handsome. tall,
dark-haired young man.
Fair Customer-It's too late for that.
I've married him.-ChicagO Tribune.
The Topeka state journal., 1906-01-18

Some men don't worry" said Uncle
Eben, cause dey got too much sense
and others don't worry cause dey ain
got sense enough Washington Star.
The Topeka state journal., 1906-01-18

senate The Abilene Reflector is
ridiculously conservative in its esti-
The Topeka state journal., 1906-01-18

Tess-I understand May Cutting re-
marked that I looked so much like Miss
Hoamley- -Ritch. Isn't she awful?
Jess-Yes. she's always knocking Miss
Hoamley-Ritch because she's jealous of
Philadelphia Press.
The Topeka state journal., 1906-01-18

''Old Cotrox has gone bankrupt"
You don't say! What was the
trouble2''
Spent ali his money trying to learn
how to hive the simple life.''-Adilwaukee
Sentinel.
The Topeka state journal., 1906-01-18

so your niece is married? Did she do
weu?''
oh my. yes! why. they got money
alone to pay the rent of their fiat for a
year in advance. Chicago Record
The Topeka state journal., 1906-01-18

Don't git proud cause things is comm
easy" said Uncle E,ben. Tain so long
sence de Thanksgivin' turkey we're feelin
important cause everybody was comm
roun' feedin' him. w ashington Star.
The Topeka state journal., 1906-01-18

oCOTCHeT-NN mat q IIItlII q . y 11'I-77--
we just ran 0yer2
Assistant-WOmau, guess
Scorcher-0h, then it's all right. was
afraid it might be an official and then
we'd be isqualihed.-Chicago News.
The Topeka state journal., 1906-01-18

did you know that In a majority OF
the counties in kentucky it is unlawful
to sell whisky
We'll, great Scott a man hasn't got
to live in those counties has ne. MIL
waulSee Sentinel.
The Topeka state journal., 1906-01-18

She'd like to sing. but there are so
many = pie here.
He-Oh- don't be bashful. You just wait
TIL YOU begin and there won't be SO
many--Judge.
The Topeka state journal., 1906-01-18

There is an old proverb that a man
becomes what he eats
.sThen I suppose an the cannibals will
be missionaries in time Cleveland
Leader.
The Topeka state journal., 1906-01-18

.'WeH. there's one thing about Nuriteh
hes always ready TO confess his
faults"
Nonsense! Why. he's forever Dragging
about being self-made.
'.Of course. That's just it.'-Philadei-
phia Press.
The Topeka state journal., 1906-01-18

The tipping evil is growing" remarked
the Wise Guy. Yes agreed the Simple
Mug, we can't even get weighed without
tipping the scales. .'-Philadelphia Record
The Topeka state journal., 1906-01-18

Motoring on rural roads-"Hi there.
boyl Where viii this road take us2''
Ter jail, mister. if the constable what's
watching round the bend ketches ye.''-
Baltimore American.
The Topeka state journal., 1906-01-18

Mr.. Younghub-This sponge cake is very
tough. my love
Mrs. Younghub-How Queeri And I told
the man to give me the youngest tender
est sponges he hadi-Cleveland Leader
The Topeka state journal., 1906-01-18

Clarence Mafson is puzzled to know
who got the money 1t never struck US
as being much Of a puzzle.-Dodd Gas
ton
The Greeley tribune., 1906-02-22
Man of the Hour.

And so Mr.. Charles Z. Hughes Is the
subject of no little speculation. The
obscure New York lawyer of the other
day is a powerful man of this day.
He is mentioned for both political and
business honors. He might have been
the Republican candidate for mayor IN
the recent municipal campaign, and
had he been might likely have swept
the city. He is now mentioned for
his party's leadership in next year
guberuatorial campaign. He is Ike.
wise suggested for the presidency OF
the Mutual Life Insurance Company
And should he decline preierment IN
both of these lines, and decide to STICK
to his profession, he is assured OF a
vast increase over the practice than he
enjoyed before. =.
All of which goes to show that Il
pays to do whatever you set out 10 u'
with all your heart and mind.
The Greeley tribune., 1906-02-22
T;th Kingly Courage.

IN Sweden a remarkable story 'S
told of King Oscars courage ana re-
solution ---,,,e-
The narrative recounts that soIa.g,, .
= man of immense stature, while lying
under sentence of death secured
long knife, and deded anyone to enter
his cell no
On hearing Of the circumstances tus
King drove at once to the prison an qnG
TiererarJinr | the warning OF me ou.,l
,ig lie entered the mans cell a5on,e .,,, 4nI
mar, Il. forInd tho door h'hluG, .''i"'
and then reasoned ilh the convict H.,
II would have been o ren', ".,,.l ,.I..,, '', ,
r,raon Nc. 10 fhe convict. Rnt far irom. ron,
tIjs XII he actually nSnIdiuod 10 ihe con-, ~.
Je,n,nd 5s,T, man why bo han ieridsl 10 10
eject anv anrnaI for merry yer NI t,7t 7t
,rrri,pd ,r,rl on the mans ceilings l.So .To
,yTan with a farewell hanlsnnS,g3, ....,,3roT tu
King left him, be wns totally SUI SuoumrT, n,yt
and ready TO meet his -atl@ss ne u'A'
morning like o soldier
The Greeley tribune., 1906-02-22
SHE HAD THE MORE NERVE.
"A Human Interest Incident of the
Metropolis.

Mrs. Charles Nonmenson, wife OF a
]eweler, of 9S7 Fulton street, Brooklyn,
was sewing in the second floor sitting
room OF their home the other afternoon,
when in walEsd burglar with a pistol
in his hand.
Il got IN the wrong house by mis-
take said he, as he doffcd his hat with
a bow 81 wanted to see Mrs. Wilson.
/"
Get out!" ordered Mrs. Nommen-
son, producing a revolver of her own
and covering the man with the rapidity
of thought "a man who gets in the
wrong house by mistake doesn't draw
thiefp
q rang the bell and it was not an
swered. The door was open, so |
came in"
You are thiefW cried the woman.
rising and keeping her revolver on him.
u will give you three minutes to get
out. II yoa are not gone then, I will
shoot and kill you, One-two-"
The burglar lodged out of the door.
Mrs. Nommenson was at his heels, her
eyes not leaving him for second, that
he might not get the drop on her. The
man saw he had lost in the game OF
nerve, and he backed down the steps.
At the front door he fumbled at the
latch. He could not open the door. 1t
seemed to present an opportunity to get
the best of the woman.
"You will have to let me out" said
the burglar
mot much," said Mrs. Nommenson,
you want to get me at close quarters -
Then as she kept him covered with
her revolver, she told him how to un-
latch the complicated lock. She kept
him covered until the street door closed
on him. Then she returned to her sew
ing,
The Greeley tribune., 1906-02-22

e social settlement in the world
Ii this be so il is fitting monu'
Pt to the generous heart, sterling
lacter and unbounded sympathy OF
founder. Miss Jane Addams.
llss Adams is now forty-five years
She was born in .edarville, Ill.
ef graduating at a well known COL
sne followed the example of her
young women friends and lived
Ae OF ease and pleasure. She spent
uMe mostly in reading and travel
gradually the thought came to her
she was absolutely without pur.
IN life. She saw the poor around
got to know their cares and wor
and cast about for a means by
cl she could do them some good.
aecided to become a physician and
years course in a Philadelphia
sse Al the end of that time she
compelled to rest and so went
oad to study social conditions. The
u't ot her observations was her re
10 America and the immediate es-
|cagO
.tI' house Is situated right in the
Vi NulcagO's poor, in HalStead
Il came to Miss Addams
gusa Miss Helen Culver, a niece of
y,u'lueF and the man for whom the
teIeht /. Is now named. 1t had been
Y ny Its owner years ago for his
loMe and in the belief that the
nU4!a grow that way. 1t did grow
way and became one of the most
ISSe4 sections of Chicago but was
r.s0 oy all nations and of a class
Ita.tu"lIty ~. unused to the fine usages
@ unused to social restrictions
shoLly without the pale of refined
T. When Miss Culver learned
noi. u,SS Adams intended founding
S'al settlement she gave her Hull
~ From the spacious mansion
was once to have been a rich
IL. Notne the settlement has extend
,bo uI0ck of buildings and here
s's W genuinely happy home of Chi
,be u l. Lle adjuncts of the settlement
sr,r1'e 'e Club, an organization of
i,s sPpS'uuE young women who are
(red S,1 pu 'lort to live up to the ideal
siac,a rIeu' IN the personality of their
n, The club is directly un.
syr- S"perVtsiou of Miss Adams
tsr ,S employe of the house. and
kobsTI,s one of the settlement, is
''O'e personally to her.
b. adams believes in the neople,
rar 5tl 5tLL ana looks TO them for the
u ur,slNsltlou of their duties and
be nee, and in this way she has
Istsn.1er their hearts. nearer their
and nearer making them
The Greeley tribune., 1906-02-22
Sck00i Gar4eN
Scenes at
Hartford Scho0l
of H0rtscUillf,-s.

specified but not to exceed a certain
amount, is to be used for the particular
improvement. The Senate invariably
has changed such bills so they appro-
pirate a fixed amount. This system is
regarded By the members of the House
interstate and foreign commerce com
mittee as being conducive to reckless
expenditure and the members OF the
committee will refuse to accept such a
bill hereafter and purpose forcing the
Senate to indorse measures which VIII
encourage the completion of work at
the lowest possible cost and the saw
ing of balances which may remain.
This action of the House committee
is in line with the general opposition
which the House is offering to what Is
declared to be the encroachment OF the
Senate upon its rights.
The Greeley tribune., 1906-02-22

the Crift is cityward; but there are
thousands of people who would Ike
to live on farms, and would, perhaps,
IL they knew something about the
growing of plants, and there is no time
like early youth to instil in the mind
love of nature and of growing things.
SO that considerable success has at
tended the school garden idea and the
nature study idea as it is being ap-
piled in number of the older institu-
tions and in some new special schools.
A striking example of this is the
School Of Horticulture at Hartford,
Conn.
In the year 1893 the Revel end
Francis Goodwin, a philanthrop1c cit
tzen, gave about 100 acres OF land and
The Greeley tribune., 1906-02-22
MAY BECOME A SENATOR
Soecuiation as to Future OF Fres''
dent Roosevelt After Term
Expires.

yVhe, Mr.. Roosevelt retires from the
,r5,,, al President of the United States
he will be but fifty-onc years OF age,
and inst entering upon his intellectual
crime, VIII he be content to go me
rat;rencnt from politics. II SO, he "'n
have to forego his present love OF DOM
things. Much, however, depends ,,. o..
chance. If he shall be as popular W.'y"
he retires as he is at present, or nan a., =,
nCo,Iar he will remain the head OF ms
p4rrv. and should he desire poliI'eA'
.p-.fr7ucnt. he will get ii.
A fter his retirement from the ffeS'-
4s,7ry George Washington was given
.o-,,,y,ard o,rr1y of the army in our actual ou'
--t JsrI1rcd war with France. Jonn
S"ircv Adams made more fame the
nine terms he was in Congress the last
sirhtccn years Of his life than III a.,
r;s previous political career, Icnerl.
T,-t-sor retired from the Presidency III
O. INIT he was the head OF his parry
,.,+T his death. in rSiz. He dictated ms
.-.,--cseo- and his will was law to Dom
", pr-rn and Polk. Van Burcr vi,
,or;tfri7r until he died. He elec,,9
n,1r- in 1874 aud defeated Cass in $50
r,-r-7I Grant was candidate lot
r7.,-,l,,rt in 1880. and had his man
-1c-s acted with little more sagacity'
rrr would have been nominated ana PEI =
r,-,s elected. Grover Cleveland was
.,l-+sI President in 1892 after his re-
tirrmcnt in 1890. a..
NJ Roosevelt is the youngest OF ll.s
Presidents, and 'v''"u he ret'' HI i'''
The Greeley tribune., 1906-02-22
The american Spoke First.

The American in the corner of the
English first-class carriage insisted on
lighting his cigar. The indignant BTll'
isher in the other corner protesleu'
but protested in vain. At the next sta. st;.
lion he hailed the guard, with hostiie
intent; but the cool American was 700
.0uick for him. Guard he draWleu'
,T think You'll find that this party mere
is travelling with a third-class ticket
an him" Investigation proved him
to be right, and the indlsnant bttIisIts' E,.a5,
vas triumphantly elected. A spec
tator of the little scene asked 5 tL5
American how he knew ABOUT INA,
ticket "Well," explained the lmpeE
turbable stranger, "the corner W.
sticking out of his pocket and Sd"
II was the same color as mine"
The Greeley tribune., 1906-02-22
AITAlNS TO FAME.
AN OBSCURE NEW YORK KYER
0ISES TO POWERFUL AND
CONMANDIrS POSITION.
oe2inning hithCas Probings,C Charles
Z. hughes Develops Into Dominat-
ing Factor in Great Insurance In
VeStigations.

In the history of the stage it has
happened more than once that an act
OF, not thought to be star, but with
sound qualities and training has ac
eepted a part rejected by others, and
by careful study and Interpretation
made 1t the most interesting portion OF
the play, and achieved distinction as
the reward of his labors. And now,
DC ore the country today, there is an
instance going to show that fortune
Tor such. tidelity is not confined to the
stage.
Ay or so ago the New York leg
lslature ordered an inquiry into the
methods Of the gas companies OF
Greater New York, and the committee
appointed for the work had some trou-
BILE in its search for legal adviser and
examiner OF witnesses. The task for
some reason. did not appeal to the
prominent members of the bar who
We approached, and the choice fin
ally fell on a man comparatively un-
known. He had to be introduced to
the public outside of legal circles. But
he developed at once into a man OF
striking force, and performed his dut-
les so well he earned the applause OF
the whole State.
The Greeley tribune., 1906-02-22
HULL HOUSE.
,,yE ADD4MS THE PATRON
S.HT tvI OF 4 MOST REMARK
'a iRLE NSTITUTION.

,,,. Has said that 1t Is the
|lu Ia' '"omolete Social Settlement
'0s' Vyorld-Founder Wonderful
boman'
cs, name of Jane Adams is known
i.v law from one end Of this vast coun-
I sI ~ another. and included in that
.,s ,ra thousands Of men, women and
sg R@trsn who regard her almost in the
EN- Of patron saint:
|Mss Adams is the founder and
.,.snt @ chief moving spirit of Hull
,nss wee Chicago, the greatest social set
(sr,aTt ever known in this country.
MI House is not really one house
;. ~ series Of buildings which have
tsrn I'm around one big dwelling
t,ch wears ago was given over to
H. Adams for the accommodation
b,Sa city's working people. The set
lrart Includes a museum, theatre, a
t,srrant and various other buildings
KIN are for the sole use of people to
kom ljfe's joys are overbalanced by
res and sorrows.
|Esn Game. the famous author, has
HI that Hull House is the most com
The Greeley tribune., 1906-02-22
Probes Insurance.

When the legislative inquiry into the
New York insurance Irregularities was
ordered the committee decided upon
legal counsel, and again difficulty was
encountered in securing it. The man
who had so satisfactorily served the
gas committee was travelling in Eu.
rope, and at the moment could not be
reached with an offer. The offer went
begging for few days, until At last
a Brooklyn lawyer accepted. Upon his
suggestion, however, the man abroad,
who was really desired, was cabled on
the subject and Engaged to assist in
the work. After the work began this
assistant virtually became the lead
ing counsel, and conducted the inves-
tigation, which was of national inter-
est, in way to merit and receive
national applause. He has become one
Of the most conspicuous figures of to-
day
The Greeley tribune., 1906-02-22

see the big side of life rather than the
one to which their eyes might other.
wise often turn.
she Is always to be found by the
lowiiest ready to listen to an appeaI
Tor help, ready to give each and every
one her strength and support and as
ready to see and help a stranger as
the Oldest habitue of the settlement.
Jane Addams occupies a peculiar no.
sition in the public eye. She has no
religious creed or, if she has, she does
not thrust 1t on her people. All sorts
OIL doctrines are preached in Hull
House but Miss Adams permits this
through the fact that her generosity
OF spirit is big enough to allow every
one his own opinion. She is regarded
with the highest esteem by officials of
The city and is frequently asked to ad.
dress large meetings. When she does
this she is listened to with strict at.
tentiou.
Miss Addams is a brilliant example
of a woman who, having all in life
has not permitted herself to be salts.
fed with her lot while others have SUI.
iered. She has devoted time, money
and all the energy in her big self to
the uplifting of the lowly, to the spirit.
ual welfare of the poor when that
could be done through kindness alone
and to the bodily comfort and enjoy
ment of these people by giving them
every means within her power to for
The Greeley tribune., 1906-02-22
NapOIeOH.
Napoleon going about Ike q raG!ns non
seeking whom be might deTouf
world.


Sir Conan Doyle considers Napo,,
leon as perhaps the most WonderLut tLI
rnon who ever lived. He writes ll"I
What VIA strikes him most f,rcibiy Is tne
lack of fnality in his character
When one decides that he is com, CON.
nI,te villain. he reads of some noole
trait AL then, loses his admiration
in m " some act of incredible meahhess;
Rut here was you. nan, VI
thirty years, with no social ad'ti-
tares. very little edr"ation. ms
family poverty striker, enterIhE a Il
room in company with kings yaCn
and every one jealous of any atten.
tons shown by him to any one oi
he must have had some private private
charm, for his intimate friend, !T'tu i,a
and worshipped him, and Wlthal ,a-,. ne ng
was the most amazing and lale4'ji .5ii
liar that ever lived. and one WHO 'olu
The truth only to himself.
An originator OF great schemes Ia 'L
seemed fantastic and impossible nus
iesty of detail brought success
where another man would have raNeu'
The Greeley tribune., 1906-02-22
SCHOOL GARDEN WORK.
AN IMPORTANT AND DA1IRACTIVE
FEATURE OF THE NEWER
EDUCATIONAL METHODS.
Five Years Course at School of
horticulture at Hartford, Conn.,
Teaches Gardening and Fruit
Growing in All Its Branches.

There is much growing sentiment
In favor of school garden work in all
parts of the country. If agriculture
Is the backbone of the country, so ag-
ricultural education is the stem and
fibre of successful farming. School
garden work, as it applies to children
who have never lived on farm, is
start toward scientific agricultural
education, and it is a branch of educa-
ton of great importance In these times
wN"n so many boys and 'rls are
drifting toward the cities and away
from the old farms. The tendency of
The Greeley tribune., 1906-02-22
CoToring Hatker in Food.

Since we have been brought face to
face with the fact that most every
article constituting our daily diet con-
tains some artificial cnloring matter.
there has been a demand for some
method by which we can test such foods
in order to determine whether or not
thew contain artificial coloring. The
Denartment of Agriculture has but re-
Gently issued a bulletin containing a
classification of the colors used in food
products as welt os methods for their
detection.
The Greeley tribune., 1906-02-22
SEN4TE'S ATTITUDE RESENTED.
House Committees Action OF Light
house and Similar Bills.

The House committee ON Interstate
and foreign commerce mas decided to
hurl defiance at the Senate in connec-
ton with all lighthouse measures and
similar bills which must be passed on
by the committee. 1t has been the
practice of the House to frame these
measures in such a way that sum not
The Greeley tribune., 1906-02-22

ne VIII be nearly two years younger
man Lincoln was at his first inaugural.
ne Will undoubtedly write deal OF
history. That he will again hold office
is not quite so certain, but it is ex-
ceedmgly probable. The United States
Senate would offer an attractive field,
and that slow and digniied body would
doubtless see some times.
The Greeley tribune., 1906-02-22

mad n board Of trustees incorporated
under the name of the Handicraft
Schools Of Hartford
His idea was TO establish school
for manual training in its different
phases.
In 1900 II. d. Hemenway. n gradu-
ate of the Massachusetts Agricultural
The Greeley tribune., 1906-02-22
THE PATRON SAINT" or HULL HOUSE.

get when it is possible that they are
moor uneducated and socially lacking
according to the standards Of the
world.