The semi-weekly messenger. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1897-1908, 1906-10-02
NOtiCeabIe Characteristics Of the
Knight Of t's Grip"
Employers Always Referred TO as The
Hou~c-Thc Hustling Stage of the
Drummer and the AnecdotaI Tourist.
curcan-Tne Habit OF Playing 10 the
Grandstand-
For The Messenger.


first place it is a very pleasant place in
which TO spend a few hours OF leisure.
next, it is q mighty good place 10 meat
people; thirdly, with so many folks
coming and going, it is a fine field for
the investigation and reflection OF the
curious student of human nature-anc
there is no type of humankind more
interesting to ne than the drummer.
In Dickens he is denominated the bag
man." but he prefers to speak OF MIN
self as O the road" and he never
house,
believe that travelling men are as
clever a set of fellows as are TO be
found anywhere, and the average
drummer is alert, broad-minded, know
ing in the ways of the world. 1t is
remarkable how he finds time to read
the papers, and keep himself in touch
with the great issues of the day. tor
you find him always cCnversant with
political questions, especially national
questions, and conservative IN view.
But. somehow, the arrival at 4 hotel,
the registering for one of the best
rooms in the house; the uShering 10 q
choice seat at table by the bowling head
waiter; the opportunity of posing be-
fore strange people in the lobby-all
prove powerful irritants OF the grand
stand disease. and it breaks out diff
ferently on different people.
The most common form Of the com
plant is the hustling stage, where ::
travelling salesman rushes up to The
writing table in the reading room, lays
piles of manuscript and note books on
each side of him, scribbles %furiOuSly
for ten minutes, consults memoranda
with puckered brow and Il cOuntenance
at preternatural WISDOM; taps his
front teeth with his pencil in a brown
study; jumps up, grabs a nearby grip
sack, pulls cut some more papers IL
feverish haste, remarks in an audible
whisper, "ah, that's it," and turns halt
around in his chair to ask the clerk il
he can get exchange on New York for
$4,000 at the bank across the way
Having thus profoundly impressed sur
rounding natives with his commercial
supremacy, he SUBSIDIES; and is found
shortly afterward playing French poo
in the billiard room with the fellow
who furnishes quail to the cafe.
An accumulation of the disease j:
found in the travelling salesman who
would fain not be taken for a mere
drummer, but carries the air Of {
captain of industry a promoter c1
millions with the scratch of the pen
He comes down the main stairway with
~leisurely pace, picking hiss teeth. ant
glancing with languid int est up at the
clock. When he gazes al it intentlH
with an air of startled dismay, com
pares it with the gold time-piece II
his waistcoat pocket, claps his hand &c
his forehead, and rusheS u the from
door, then you know that he is on the
verge Of a big deal for 1898, 999.99, ant
has only two minutes left in which lc
close it.
With the anecdotal tourist the all
ment is chronic and of many years
standing, but he is not SO sure Of MS
ground. He has had the "chestnu'
bell rung on him so often and in Sc
many places that he fights shy OF let,
ting himself out until he has sized VI
his auditory. But his JOY is really IN
fictitious when he discovers that he has
stuck his spade into virgin soil. H
takes his listeners under his wing as
hen gathers up her brood, and he pro
ceeds to fill them up like a row O
pitchers on a shelf, or like the guile
less farmer preparing his milk can
for market at the pump. But, although
the drummer now and then gets OF
some old thing. he has some goo
stories in his repertoire, and not Ions
ago | heard one tell something that
struck ne as very funny, though
| little irreverent. [ was travelling on ne
train. and just across the aisle sat i've
drummers. one of whom told this:
Two brothers, living in different
towns a good distance apart, took Il
en- themselves, by turns, TO take carr
of their aged father, and they did II
very well, vieing with each other n
providing for his comfort as carefully
as did Wememick in Dickens "Greai
Expectations for his father, whom ne
vhimsically called Aged P" The
brothers were as different is night and
day. One was piOus, a member of be
church, a teacher in the Sunday scnoo
and knew the Bible from lid to lid. Tn
other was a generous, whole-soule1
fellow, but something Of Il r%eprobate
he used words not found N the dicticr-
airy; if he knew tie Lords Prayer j
was as much, and Holy Writ was pr7t-
ty much Greek to him. While thu
father was with the good brother ne
was stricken with apoplexy and die
in a few minutes. The pious brother
telegraphed 10 the wicked brother a:
follows: Jesus has taken fathel
away with him" In about half an non!
there went back a scare-head telegram
thus: who in the HI is Jesse, an
where has he taken father?"
The disease is a virulent epidemic IL
the a 5 of the musical drummer; anc
if it ever ome 10 pass that re /:
only shot through the heart seTe-a
times with a Winchester rife, or ri
has his head filled with balls from 8
3s-calibre revolver, he will get of "tol'
luble light"-the musical drumme'
will He is generally a stout built
stocky sort of gentleman, with a bush,
brown moustache turned up al the
ends, a horse shoe pin in his craTar