Rural Retreat times. [volume] (Rural Retreat, Va.) 1892-1918, 1906-12-21
THE BANNER MAN"
Writes Abouta New Language,

Lip language is understood to be
the latest ctaze which will occupy the
spare time ofsoeietyi the place Of banjo
play ing and skirt dancing.
The ABOVE paragraph from recent
issuo of family paper falls upon the
ears Of the great. good people like the
dun. sickening thud spoken of in al the
4irst class ncye's. Instead Of using
words, ali conversation is to be carried
on with certain m )vements of the lips
aud gyrations of the facial muscles.
There will be no sound: all will be as the
midnight air Just after the girl screams
and jumps over the pracipice.
This will, no doubt be a great inn
proYem ent over spoken language.
Some people, Tongues will geta much
needed rest and this will give them a
better taste in their mouthsof mornings
s'afier the ball, ~ II viii also enab!e
many oyerworked and run down hus-
bands in this and adjoining counties to
read their evening paper with more ease
and less tran5IinEs Think Of it, ye
men who come home after twelve 0 clock
a. IL. A you need 70 do is to turn down
the gas and retire with your face towards
the wall, II you have taught your wife
to use lip language you can bid farewell
10 every fear and wipe the cold sweat
fperspiration) from the dash boards OF
your face with your foretinger. She will
be twisting her mouth like two months
Old baby before using Cast0ria but let
her go. No Christian man objects to
his wife working her mouth all she
pleasee;it is the sounds proceed from
said month which causes his knees TO
weaken and bis false teeth to rattle like
dry bones in the Valley OF Jrhosophat.
Rejoice We married men of America
that yoar hour of deliYerance is at hand.
Three cheers and tiger for lip language
aud the products there Of!
But married men are not the only ones
WHO viii be benefited by this new and
stylish way Of conveying IDEAS Single
nel with little pusA aud i'm win be
able to make it pay them 100 cents on
the dollar. Of course they will have to
get up early and stay up la e to reap the
full ben6ls. Some post sad years ago
something about.
when meek gray eyes drop still
more meek.
Aud dimples play at hide and seek,
There's but one language lips can speel1.
lis brief, but rather pleasant"
Everybody who has passed the bum
blebee--mud squashing age, has tried
the above kind Of lip language, more or
less. The only tlouble was it had not
been legalun now. Bot thanks be to
civilization and other articles TO numer.
Gus to mention We eau now court With
lip language and none dare to modest or
make us afraid.
iustead of fellow talking himself TO
death trying to make dark eyed girl
believe he loves her all he needs to do is
10 use his lips and mustaehe in the right
manner. There viii be no noise to dis
turb the old folks or start the roc eter to
crowlng. Yen sill SIMPLY Sent yourself
on the sofa and do your sparkling with
hands. looks and lips. Tho aims will lie
used TO emphazise your remarks the
same as before, and probably a little
"samer"
OF course the lips wiz be supposed 10
touch; nothing is 10 be spoken by sight
alone. Oh my, lot us thank the Lord
morning, noon and night for lip langu
Age Won't We get there ia great shape
next Sunday night about $50, standard
sastern time.
THINK Of candidate for congress
making political speech iulip language
IT wonld be holy sight to see IS clone lin
twisting his face in order to explain why
ne cursed high tapf in his public
speeches and then favored adu,y on coal
after he got TO congress The left corner
of his mouth Will cross the disk OF bis
right ear and be in apogee with his nose
for Eve minutes. Then bis neither lbs
will be in conjunction with his medult
oblongata and cause an angular eclipse
~ has cerebfnn3. Several other gentle
men 10 this Land Of the free and home 0
iile tfa,nps wilt ALSO have 10 eolssafeg
ll43y faces and paeKer their mouth
DSNuAfaig - order to explain LAeil
/, 1seln'1-ia rengTess.v