Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1906-02-13
SOME CLERICAL HLuNpERs.
Humorous Mistakes Made by Pas
tors I'm the Pulpit.

tors In the Pulpit.
Each profession has its stock jokes,
Its stories innumerable, and to each
belongs a flavor all ITS own. That the
point of jest les not in the tongue
of him who makes it, but in the ear
that hears. is the testimony of the
great dramatist The doctor on his
rounds and the judge upon the bench
have both an audience ready and will
Ing to accept as the highest wit the
bonmots of the speakers; and there
is no club or gathering of men that
does not acclaim one of its members
as supreme in this respect and is not
ready to yield due recognition of the
gift, says Chambers Journal. There
Is, however, vast amount of uncon-
scious huInor always floating about,
and to those who perceive it the world
Is ever very amusing 1t must be adj
mitted that the blunders and jests
clerical stand for some reason pre-
eminent both in number and in mirth-
producing qualities. The reason. of
course, is not far to seek: the very
surroundings in which they occur the
very upsetting of ones preconceired
notions of reverence, all tend to Cause
a reaction in the ordinary mental
equilibrium, and the simplest mistake
or accident under such circumstances
assumes the proportions Of a huge
comedy.
The divine who In drawing the at
tention OF his congregation to a spe-
cial communion service on the follow
Ing Sunday informed them that 1.-The
Lord is with us in the forenoon and
the bishop in the evening" is chron-
lcled with praying for the children
of his parish, in these words: And
now, o Lord, bless the lambs Of this
fold and make them meet for the
kingdom of heaven" While a Scotch
minister innocently, perhaps, hit the
mark by telling his people: "Weel,
friends, the kirk is urgently in need of
siller; and as we have failed to get
money honestly, we will have To see
what bazaar can do for u.s."
There is certain amount of excuse
W DC AllAOC lOA ihC gOulASs SllalC WHO,
remarking that some people came to
church for no better reason than to
show off their best clothes, finished
up as he glanced over his audience:
II am thankful to see, dear friends,
that none of you have come here for
that reason"
An Irish clergyman is credited with
having concluded a powerful grafton
in this fashion: MY brethren, let not
this world rob you of peace which it
can neither give nor take away"
Which is coupled with the remark of a
fellow country colleague who in rea-
soning with woman who had lost
her faith in Christianity told her:
well, you will go to hell, you know;
and 1 shall be very sorry, indeed, to
see you thereW
But what can be said of the negro
student who, conducting the prayers
at one of the great missionary colleges,
said: Give us all pure hearts, give us
all clean hearts, give us all sweet
hearts" to which the entire congrega-
ton made response Amen"
The giving out of church notices
has often proved a pitfall for the I'M
wary. During Lent" said a rector
lately, several preachers will preach
on Wednesday evenings; but l need
not give their names, as they will be
all found hanging up in the porch"
1t was a rector who gave out a
hymn beginning Awake nv soII
stretch every nerve" before his SER
mon, and a curate who read in the
lesson for the day, HE spake the
words, and cathoppers came and
grassipillars innumerable;" but it was
at a young woman's Bible class that,
when asked what hymn should be
sung at the close, they all with one
accord chose Where is my wandering
boy tonight"