davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-05-24
BALD-HEADED RRIDEoRooMs
They Are Fine Citizens and It Is No
Wonder the Girls Like
Them.

An esteemed contemporary has
opened the columns to a discussion OF
the question why do educated and
refined women marry hald-heade
men," and men with and without hair
seem to be considerably agitated over
1t. Even women are joining in the
discussion, and there are as many ex-
plantations as there are correspondents.
None of them, however, explains, says
the st. Louis Globe-Democrat
1t is the form of the question evil
IDENTIFY that confuses. 1t presumes too
much and the presumption is accept
ed as established by the wrangle-
they do not question the premise,
Educated and refined women DO not
as a rule marry bald-headed men,
though they do sometimes, when they
cannot catch them earlier.
The question deals with particulars
as generals. 1t should be: "Why do
women marry menu Ana he answer
to this, if we do not confuse the is
sue by the citation of examples, OF
which we remark: What on earth
did she see in him?" is simple.
Women marry men to get husbands.
Men marry women to get wives Fat,
lean, young. old, hirsute and bald, all
marry for the same reason. 1T is not
good for man to live alone"
Anyway, why should the bald head
be brought into the limelight in his
spectacular way2 Is it not conspicu-
Gus enough as it is to attract much UNI
desired attention without forcing tho
issue?
Bald-headed men are worthy citi-
zens. They must be, for they are al
ways under inspection. A bald head
is light that cannot be hid under a
bushel, it may not conceal itself. If
it frolics somewhat gayly, the world
says: Behold you shameless cne!"
bald head must perforce seek vlr-
tuous ways. There are few or no bald
headed villains. They are scarce az
fat beggars.
Let not the finger of scorn be point
ed at the bald head for that he mar
ries q refined and educated woman"
1t is to his credit. The bald head sets
an example that the hirsutely rich
might emulate with profit The bald
head is the symbol of lofty citizen
ship and Shines" like a good 1eed
in naughty world
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-05-24

were scared silly at the supernatural
power pa seemed to have The squaws
seemed to get more electricity than the
buck Indians, cause pa squeezed hard
err and the way they danced and cut
up didoeS would make you think they
had been drinking. Finally pa touched
them all with his magic wand, and
then they prepared a feast and cele-
brated their engagement to go with the
circus, and we packed up and got
ready to go to a cattle round up the
next day at a ranch outside the Indian
reservation, where pa was to engage
some cowboys for the show. AS we
left the headquarters. on the reserva-
ton the next morning all the Indians
went with us for few miles, cheering
us, and pa waved his hands to them.
and said, bless you, me children and
looked SO wise, and SO good, and great
that | was proud of him. The squaws
threw kisses at pa, and when we had
left them, and had got out of sight, pa
said, Those Indians will give the
squaws wallOping when they get
back to camp, but who can blame them
for falling in love with the great faith
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-05-24
VIII WIND Up oo10RRE.
General Paper Company to Be Dis
solved Snd Reorganization
Effectsd as Soon as Possible.

Appleton.-The General Paper COM
pany has practically decided to dis
solve the General Paper company,
comprising Fl paper companies of the
middle west, and which has been under
fire of the federal government for
some months as operating contrary to
the provisions of the Sherman anti
trust law. Just how much longer the
General Paper company will remain
extant is not known, but information
from semi-official sources here is to the
effect that its business will be closed
up as rapidly as possible and the COM
pany declared dissolved.
1t Is not the intention of the paper
manufacturers, however, to remain in
the field as individual dealers in pa
per product, according to the same
source Of information. The General
will be dissolved and a reorganization
will be- effected as soon as possible.
In fact, it is limited that there will be
no interim between the dissolution Of
the General and the organization of
the proposed new concern, which will
doubtless be an ownership.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-05-24
HENS OF HAWAII FAIL.
Climatic Conditions Said to Be Un-
favorable to the Egg
Supply.

The chickens in Honolulu, for rea-
sons best known to themselves, have
positively refused to lay eggs. AS a
consequence good laying hens are
much in demand in San Francisco for
shipment to the Hawaiian islands,
says the San Francisco Examiner, OF
recent date.
Every steamship that leaves for
Honolulu carries a large consignment
Of laying hens and the supply is not
equal to the demand. Climatic con-
ditions" is the excuse put forward foa.
the failure of the Honolulu hen to lay.
The middle western states, as well as
California, export chickens to the
islands, the yearly shipment for the
islands averaging 400 carloads Of
dressed and 200 carloads of live poul-
try.
sAll the best laying hens that can
be secured in California are shipped
down to Honolulu at the present time"
said a commission man. For some
vet undiscovered reason the hens
raised in the Hawaiian islands are NOT
good egg producers, and as result we
have orders 10 ship all the good lay
ing hens that we can down to the
islands"
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-05-24
Seeks denomination.

Henry D. James, of Dodgeville, now
serving his second term as treasurer
of Iowa county, has announced himself
as a candidate for the Republican
nomination to the Office of state treas
urer at the primary election to be held
the first Tuesday in September. Mr..
James was born in Dodgeville June /,
1861, and is the youngest son of the
Rev and Mrs. w. D. James, with
whom he moved to Lincoln in 1882,
where he resided until he was appoint
ed deputy sheriff in 1892. In 1900 he
was nominated against strong opposi-
ton as sheriff in Iowa county and was
elected by an overwhelming majority.
In 1892 he broke all precedents by be-
ing nominated and elected as county
treasurer of Iowa county, no other Of
ficer ever having gone from one Of
flee to another in the history of the
county He was reelected in 1904
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-05-24
Inheritance Tax Law in Court.

The supreme court heard arguments
in two cases involving the constitu
tionally of the state Inheritance tax
law. One was in the case of the Pabst
Brewing company, of Milwaukee,
against County Judge Carpenter, who
issued an order compelling the COM
pany to produce its books in court in
order that the tax on the estate left
by Capt. Pabst might be accurately
determined. The company secured
writ of prohibition from the supreme
court against Judge Carpenter The
case was argued on demurrer to the
return, which really brought the mer-
it's of the entire case before the court.
The validity of the inheritance tax
law came UP squarely in the Nunne-
macher case. While this action only
involves a tax of $4,000 to the Nunne-
macher estate, 1t will compel the state
to refund $234,0OO to estates which
have paid taxes under the law if 1t
should be declared invalid. The law is
assailed on the ground that it does not
provide for uniform taxation, but
Classics citizens for purposes of tax
alton, which is contrary to the consti-
tuition
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-05-24

the fire to get hot enough for them to
lay him on the Goals, | felt almost like
crying, cause didn't want to take
pas remains back home so scorched
that they wouldn't be an ornament to
society, so l went UP to pas couch to
get his instructions as TO our future
course, when he should be all in.
| said, PA, this is the most serious
case you have yet mixed UP in. o,
wimmen, how you do ruin men who
put their trust in you"
Pa winked at me, and said:
Never you mind me, Hennery. |
will come out of this scrape and have
al the Indians on their knees in less
than an hour begging my pardon" and
then pa whispered to me, and | went
to pas valise ana got an electric bat
terry and put it in pa S pocket and scat
tered copper wires all around pas
body, and fixed it so pa could touch a
button and turn on charge of cleo
tricity that would paraly ze an ele-
phant, and then / got some matches
and took the phosphorus off and put
it all over pas face and hands and
clothes, and as it became dark and the
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-05-24
State Capital Notes
Weekly Budget Gathered Our Special Cores
IS. pondeut at Madison

Madison. that the fish
and game laws of the state are am
biguous, inconsistent, and self-inval-
idating. Attorney ]. M. Clancy, of
Stoughton, former attorney general,
presented and argued an exhaustive
brief in the municipal court 1t was
in the case of Helmer Felland, a
Stoughton boy, charged with Illegal
fishing and having pickerel in his
possession. After listening to nearly
three hours of argument, Judge Don
oyan announced he would take the
matter under adyisement. The news
that Attorney Clancy was making a
vigorous attack upon the fish and
game laws spread rapidly among
Madison sportsmen, and several local
attorneys since have examined the
law. They say the statutes are seri-
ously involved and should be remod-
aled and made more clear. Clancy
brought out many points, quoting
from the statutes freely. He made
the sensational statement that in
Dane county pickerel are not pro
tected. He said 1t may have been
the intention of the legislature to have
pickerel regarded as a game fish, but
it failed to specify and make such in
tention clear. Should his contentious
be upheld by Judge Donovan or car
ried to a higher court and upheld the
present fish and game laws would be
rendered void and poachers might
hunt and fish in any manner with i'm
punity.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-05-24
HAD TO HAVE TOBACCO.
Prisoner in Racine Jail, Deprived of
Stimulant, Attempts to Com
NIT Suicide.

Racine.-George Steffen. a printer so
years old, said to be from Milwaukee,,
tried to hang himself in a cell at the
county jail because he was refused a
chew of tobacco by the officials. Stef-
fen came to the city some days ago
and was arrested on charge of va
grancy. He served a term in Jail.
Later he was again taken in while beg
ging. During the night he tore up
his shirt, made rope of the pieces,
but was discovered in time. When taxi
en- into court Steffen showed terrible
injuries sustained in an accident which
incapacitated him from labor. He said
that he was great tobacco chewer
and that no tobacco was allowed him
in the Jail. 1t made him crazy and he
wanted to die. He begged Judge
Shielding not to send him back there.
The judge let him go, and he left the
city
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-05-24
State University Investigation.

The legislative committee investi
eating the State university decided to
send it's members to universities of
nearby states to inquire into their
management and secure any informa
ton that might aid in installing re-
forms at Madison. The different mem
bers of the committee will visit diff
ferent universities, and when they re-
turn they will compare notes. Dr.
Clarke Gapon, of Madison, an alumnus
of the university and a widely known
physician, was asked concerning the
ACCESSIBILITY of permitting Greek let
ter fraternities at the university and
regarding the present system of man
agement of the institution. He eX
pressed the opinion that the fraternity
system was helpful to large body of
the students, but he believed that more
stringent restrictions should surround
them in order that they might be
more democratic and that the line of
demarcation between them and the
nonfraternity students might not be
as pronounced as at present. The
next meeting of the committee will
probably not be held until some time
next month
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-05-24
BUSINESSLIKE GOVERNMENT
City OF England That Is Run IN a
Simple Yet Very Effective
System.

The government of Manchester is a
business. It's liabilities are about
$156,000 900; its assets are about
$4,000, 900; and the deficiency, about
$9,000,000, represents the amount
which the ratepayers have to coz.
tribute each year, writes Samuel Mer-
win, in Success Magazine. The fig
ures indicate that it is a big bust
ness. The management OF this big
business is absolutely in the hands OF
the city council acting through it's
committees. AS | have said, tho sys-
tenn is simple, and the responsibility
cannot be evaded as it can be in a
muddled-up, complicated system like
that of New York or Chicago or New
ark. The people know what has to
be done, and they know who has to
do it. But, even at that, big figures
are confusing to the average mind.
And then, too, it is well to submit
the figures which a city council pNb-
fishes to an unsympathetic eye. And
so. because the people of Manchester
propose to know what is done with
their money, they have in their serv-
ice two men whose business it is to
investigate and publish, at regular in
tervals, every tendency Of the coun-
Gil toward carelessness or extraya-
gance. Never for a moment are the
councillors permitted to forget whose
money it is that they are managing
with such fluent ease.
These two men are known as "elec-
tive auditors" They are elected de
rectly by the people, and the more
merciless their attacks on the coun-
Gil the better they please the people.
They are free from the slightest obli-
cation to the council. They have ac-
cess to all facts and figures, for the
people of Manchester find it difficult
to understand why their government,
managed by their personal representa-
tives with their money, should not
work wholly in the light. These re-
ports are published weekly in the
Manchester "City News"
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-05-24
FIDDLER FOUND KEYNOTE.
Story of a Pittsburg Suspension
Bridge That Was Made
to Dance

The old Sixth street bridge was
suspension bridges and. in connection
Herewith a story used to be told.
Everybody knows, says the Pittsburg
Gazette, that soldiers in crossing
suspension bridge must break step and
bands are not allowed to play marches,
because of the cumulative force of the
vibrations, which are apt to either de-
stroy the bridge completely or crystal
lie the iron cables Now. sound is vi
bration, and this explanation. not very
scientifically put here. is the basis. of
the story, remembering that every 90
ject is supposed to have keynote
which when struck on musical in
strument, evokes responsive vibrations
in the said object.
The story goes that many years ago
an old man, carrying fiddle in case,
once started across the bridge without
paying toll. He. was called back by the
toll keeper, protested his inability to
pay, but was not allowed to cross.
Threatening vengeance, the old fiddler
seated himself on the wharf under the
Allegheny end of the bridge and began
to scrape away on his fiddle for hours.
apparently trying all sorts of notes
half notes and combination of notes
and chords.
Suddenly he seemed to find what he
sought, for his face lighted up and ne
began to scrape steadily on certain
chord A moan went through the
bridge. Faster played the old man, and
the wire cables fairly sang in response
TO the wild notes of the fiddle. Furious
ly the old fiddler scraped away and thu
cables began to vibrate. slowly at first
the vibrations growing stronger as the
keynote sounded on the violin. The
bridge began to tremble, then to sway
BY this time the toll keepers saw
something was up, for the pedestrians
on the bridge began to run, drivers
whipped up their horses, men and wo-
men with blanched faces declined ID
set foot on either end of the structure.
A messenger (there were no telephones
them was dispatched for the superIa-
tendent, and he came running. The
old fiddler was pointed out and cor
stable was ordered to arrest him. but,
there OeluS no SUSPICIOUS person law
then in existence, the officer shook
his head.
The bridge was cutting up all sorts of
capers. swaying back and forth like
swing. until at last the superintendent
in desperation ran to the fiddler and
promised never to demand toll from
him. An agreement was entered into.
the fiddler pledging to keep secret 20
his dying day the keynote, SO that no
revengeful musician ever again could
place the structure in jeopardy without
studying out the KEYNOTE himself
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-05-24

err" and then pa winhed, and put
spurs to his pony and we rode across
the mesa, looking for other worlds to
conquer.
On the way to the ranch where we
were to meet the cowboys and engage
enough to make the show success,
the cowboy pa had along told pa that
it might be easy enough to fool Indians
with the great father dodge, and the
electric battery, and all that but when
he struck mess of cowboys he would
find different proposition, cause he
couldn't fool cowboys a little bit. He
said if pa was going to hire cowboys,
he had got to be cowboy himself, and
if he couldn't rope steers he would
have to learn, cause cowboys, if they
were to be led in the show by pa,
would want him to be prepared to rope
anything that had four feet. Pa said
while he didn't claim to be an expert,
he had done some roping, and could
throw lasso, and while he didn't al
ways catch them by the feet, when he
tried to. he got the rope over them
somewhere, and if the horse he rode
knew its business he ultimately got
his steer. and he would be willing to
show the boys what he could do
We got to the COW camp in time for
dinner, and our cowboy introduced pa
to the cowboys around the chuck wag-
on, and told them pa was an old cow
boy who had travelled the Texas trail
yeara ago, and was one of the best
horsemen in the business, a manager
of show that was adding a wild west
department. and wanted to hire 40 or
more Of the best ropers and riders, at
large salaries, to join the show, and
that pa considered himself the legiti-
mate successor of Buffalo Bill, and
money was no object. Well, the boys
were tickled to meet pa, and some said
they had heard of him when he was
roping cattle on the frontier, and that
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-05-24
Suicide at Waumatosa.

Wauwatosa.-O. F. Lee, cigar
maker, committed suicide by shooting
himself while undressed and in bed.
The suicide occurred at $50 o'clock,
and, until the report awakened his
wife, she had no premonition that her
husband contemplated the rash deed.
Ill health and drink are said to have
been responsible. Mr. Lee was well to
do and owned property in Milwaukee,
as well as in Wauwatosa. He was So
years of age and is survived by is
wife and a daughter, Mrs. Joseph
Fisher.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-05-24

phosphorus began to shine. pa was a
sight He looked like moonlight on
the lake, and | got the cowboy and the
big game hunter and the educated In
dian to get down on their knees
around pa, and chant something that
would sound terrible to the Indians
The only thing in the way of chant
that all of them could chant was the
football tune. ''Therell Be Hot Time
in the Old Town Tonight" and we
were whooping it up over pas illumi-
mated remains when the Indians came
out to put pa on the fire, and when
they saw the phosphorescent glow all
over him, and his face looking as
though he was at peace with all the
world, and us whites on our knees,
making motions and singing that hot
dirge, they all turned pale, and were
scared, and they fell back reverently,
and gazed fixedly at poor pa, who was
winking at US and whispering to us to
keep it up, and we did.
The old chief was the first to recov-
er, and he saw that something had to
be done pretty quick, so he talked In
dian to some of the braves, and l
slipped away and put some phosphor-
us all over a sGuaw, and she looked
like lightning bug, and told her to go
and fall ON pas remains and yell muir
der The Indians had started to grab
pa and put him on the fire when pa
turned on the battery and the big chief
got dose big enough for whole
flock of Indians, aud all who touched
pa got a shock. and they all fell back
and got on their knees, and just then
the squaw with the phosphorus on
her system came running out. and she
fell across pas remains, and she shone
so you could read fine print by the
light she gave. and that settled it with
the tribe. cause they all laid down fat
and were at pas mercy. Pr pushed the
illuminated squaw away, and went
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-05-24
GRAND RAPIDS BELLE WEEDS.
Miss Edith Nash Married to Mason
Branham of Kentucky at the
Home OF Her Parents.

Grand Rapids.-Miss Edith Nash,
youngest daughter of Mr.. and Mrs.
Thomas Nash, was married at the
home of her parents to Mason Bran
ham, of Hopkinsville, KY, the Rev.
Mr.. Staff officiating. Miss Adele Cren-
shaw, of Chicago, was bridesmaid and
Miss Olive Cook, of Medina, N. Y,
maid of honor. The groom was attend
ed by his brother, James Bramham, Of
Duluth, MINI. The groom is a travel
ing salesman for the Standard OIL
company. The father of the bride is
heavily interested in paper mills. The
couple will tour Kentucky and other
points and return here to reside.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-05-24

around and put his foot on the neck
of each Indian. in token of his abso-
lutte mastery over them, and then he
babe them arise, and he told them he
had only done these things to show
therl the power of the great father
over his children, and now he would
reveal to them his object in coming
amongst them, and that was to engage
20 Of the best Indians, and 20 of the
best squaws, to join our great show
at an enormous salary, and be ready
in two weeks to take the road. The
Indians were delighted and began to
quarrel about who should go with the
show, and to quiet them pa said he
wanted to shake hands with all Of
them, and they lined up, and pa took
the strongest wire attached to the bat
terry in his pistol pocket, and let it
run up under his coat and down his
sleeve, into his right hand, and that
was the way he shook hands with
them | thought | would die laughing.
Pa took position, like president at
a New Years reception, and shook
hands with the tribe one at time.
The old chief came first, and pa
grasped his hand tight, and the chief
stood on his toes and his knees
knocked together, his teeth chartered,
and he danced a can can while pa held
on to his hand and squeezed, but he
finally let go and the chief wiped his
hand on dog, and the dog got some
Of bo n1nnfri0itV Iii Uiod IN hnof
the band Then pa shook hands with
everybody, and they all went through
the same Kind OF performance, and
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-05-24
Big Suit Settled Out of Court.

The famous $4,000 alienation of af-
fections suit brought by Mrs Charlotte
w. White, of Waukesha, against her
mother-in-law, Mrs. Frances l.. White,
wife of the millionaire Milwaukee
real estate dealer, has been settled out
Of court The defendant is the daugh-
ter of the late Gov. Ludington, of Wis
consin, and the sons marriage took
place at Waukegan, ILL.,, December II,
1901. The daughter-in-law, in SEN
sational bill, averred that her husband
had been induced by his mother to
leave her and despise her. 1t is ru-
mored that she will start another SIM
liar suit with change in the techni-
cal points.