New-York tribune., 1906-10-21
Copyright by W. W. Jaoobs.)

Speaking money" said the night watchman
thoughtfuIly. he selected empty soapbox on
the wharf for a seat, ''the whole world would be
different If all 'ad more of IT, It would be
brighter and a 'appier place for everybody"
THE funniest way O. raising the wind I ever
card Of" he added, twas that appened about
fifteen years ago. ia just taken my discharge
as A. B. from the North Star. trading between
here and the Australian ports. and the men wot
the thing 'appened to shipmates o mine al
though ony hrenen.
"I knows it's true story becos was in it a
little bit myself and the other part ad from all
OF 'em, and besides, they didn't see anything funny
IN It at all, anything out OF the 1t seemed
10 them quite a easy way O. making money, and
dessay II it ad come off all right I should have
thought so too
In about a week arter we was paid off at the
Albert Docks these chaps was all cleaned out, and
they was all in despair. with thirst wot wasn't
half quenched and a spree wot was on'y in a man
ner O. speaking just begun, and at the end Of that
time they round to a wot ad, to see
wot could be done. There four of EN- IN ALL
Old Sam Small, Ginger Dick. Peter Russet and
orphan nevy of Sans, whose father and mother
was dead. The mother ad been aIt niger an
! 'alf Malay when she living and Sam was al
ways perticker careful to point out that his nevy
took arter er. It was enough TO make the pore
turn in 'er grave to say so. but Sam used to
say that e owed It to is brother explain.
"'wots to be done?' Peter Russet arter
they'd all said wot miserable chaps they was. an
'ow badly sailormen paid. We're all going to
sign IN the Lands End but she doesn't sail for a
fortnight; wot's TO be done in the meantime for to
live"
Everythin's agin u.s. ses old Sam. There's
them four green parrots brought from Brazil all
dead
so are my two monkeys Peter Russet.
shaking Is head they used to sleep with me. too
Talking about monkeys ses Ginger Dick, 'wot
about young Beauty here?
We'll. wot about hn?' ses the nevy, In a nasty
sort O. way.
IVY, 'e's worth forty monkeys an millions O.
green parrots ses Ginger starting up; an here
e is a-wasting OF IS opportunities, going about
dressed like Christian. Open your mouth. Beauty
and stick your tongue out and roll your eyes Bit
~ tell you, mates ses Ginger, speaking very
slow and solemn, there's fortn In 'im. I
lookin' at i'm Just now. trying 10 think who o
minded OF. At fust thought 1t that big
stuffed monkey saw at Melbourne then sud-
denly reInemb,re IL was a wild man of Borneo
see when l Wa a kid up IN Sunderland. When
say e a 'andsome good 'arted looking gentle
alongside O. you, Beauty, do you begin to get
my meaning9
My idea is this Ginger; take is cioes off
i'm and dress i'm up in that there winder blind or
something o. the kind; tie i'm UP with a o. line
and take i'm round to Ted Reddish in the 'Ighway
and sell I'm for 'undered quid wild man of
Borneo'
"'Wotr screams Beauty in an awyfuI voice
"'old your noise. Beauty, while your elders is
speaking is uncle. and I could see e was
struck with the idea
" You jest try dressing up in a winder- blind
his nevy half crying with rage
Listen TO reason. Beauty, ses Ginger; you'll
your share of the tin; it only be for day or
two, and then. when we've cleared out, you can
make your escape. and thererl be twenty-five
pounds each OF US
1T took 'em best part OF our talk round
young Beauty, an the iangwidge they fit to use
made me thankful 10 think that the parrots didn't
live laIn IT.
You never anything like Beauty when thev
'ad finished with I'm II e bad in is coes a
perfeck horror without 'em.