Washington State journal and Adams County news. [volume] (Ritzville, Wash.) 1906-1907, 1906-11-14
Y@E|l6hES
A1,tkN ~


like an amateur?-Ex.
| Teacher-Tommy, what is the M;
Of the largest known diamond? Toni
The ace.-Cleveland Leader.
Heidi you know 1 had become
actor? She-No. All heard W
that you had gone on the stage.
Judge.
How many stops has that organ
bought your daughter?" "Five-bres
fast, dinner, tea. supper and bed!"
, Judge.
Beulah-Why do you call 1t a dout
elopement? Alma--lIe first ran aw,
with her and then with her money.
Town Topics.
knlcker-Jones and his wife a
singing the "Marseillaise." Booker.
Yes; they are bracing up to dischari
the cook.-IIarper's Bazaar.
| Maude-Oh, dear. dread Il
thought Of my thlrtic'i birthday. Clai
Why. I supposed you had forgotts
1t long ago.-Chicngo Daily News.
Il think Mrs. Newcome is so swee
Don't you? You can read her cha
acter In her face" Yes. II you rea
between the lines. "-Harpers Bazaar.
The ragged heroine-Merciful hea'
ems! l am perishIng from the cold
Voice from the gallery-Sweep up d
snow storm an make a bonfire !-Pucl
"Iiow do you like your government
positionT I'm greatly disappointed
l have to work as hard to I'LL the plnc
as l did to get t."-Washngton Stai
Mlnnle--I want to Introduce you t
young lady--a very nice young lad.
and she's worth her weight In gold
Bob-Stout girl, l hope.-New Yorker
You say your late uncle was an &c
centric old fellow. DO you think h,
was insaneT II don't know-the will
hasn't been read yet.--Cleveland Lead
or.
well. this Is putup job. NIL right
said the man. as he struggled. under
his wife's direction, to hang the pic
lures on the parlor wall.-Somervill
Journal.
He-DO you think blondes have more
admirers than brunettes? She-I don't
know. You might ask Miss Turner.
She has had experiences In both capa.
cities.-New Yorker.
Have you much room In your new
DAFT" Room! Mercy me, l should
think not. Why. our kitchen and din
Ing room are 80 small that we have to
use condensed milk."-Puck.
The sor-Undoubtedly n mar
BILE statue Ii the best way Of perpet-
uating a memory. The sweet girl
Oh. l don't know. always tie knot
In my pocket dkerchief.-Picl-M Me-
Up.
THAT man Fewscads is right
wealthy. Isn't her" "why no. How
came you to think so?" II understand
he has an automobile, and that he has
been operated on for appendicitis."-
Dallas News.
Rural authorizations why doesn't
some one tell that pretty girl over there
that her hair IL mussed up and needs
combing? City niece-Sh! aunty that
IL the fashionable Automobile tousle."
Chicago News.
The upper finttcr's wife (breathless.
ly)-Dear. I've n piece OF news for you.
The nute-player across the hall 10
dead! The upper-hatter (pleadingly)
Please don't mike me laugh--my lips
are so chapped.-Judge.
General trafic manager-So forty
were killed In the wreck7 We must
tx the responsibility. Superintendent
Of rebates-Hadn't we better nx tho
roadbed7 President-All will be well
II we az the legIslature.-Smart Set
IAN elephant must be n pretty ex.
pensive animal" Eyes. 1 wish I had
enough money to buy one." what
do you want with an elephantT II
don't I merely expressed wish for
the money."-Philadelphia Public
Ledger.
Here, willie!" cried the boys
father. you mustn't behave that way.
Everybody will be calling you a little
glutton. DO you know what that is7"
II suppose" replied Willie, ats big
glutton's little boy."-PhIladelphia
Press.
Elsie-So you consider him mislead.
ing and disappointing? Why7 EdIe-
Well. he had me on tenter-hooks Inst
night In expectation that he was going
/ A. -