The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-06-26
With the Long Bo,0
Eye natune's walks, shoot folly as II files =
Test Of the Correctness Of Ones Mentanty-If your
Whiskers Bristle Your Philosophy Is at Fault

~ OWIE's fathers whiskers waved in peaceful,
/ contented way he gave his testimony, but
- the prophets beard bristled. If your whiskers
briste you are pretty sure to be IN the wrong.
The new melodrama ttLost at Deephaven y is being
played to large audiences at the Sampson operahouse
in Excelsior. In the last act the hero having kissed
the heroine about take the last streetcar for the
city, when he finds the gates shut and the car moving
majestcally away whilst the band plays feengly the
new popular air, Gathers Beard Is Made OF
Whiskers.' -
An editor with those oldfashioned notions sent
out reporter interview thirty successful business
men and find that all Of them when boys had been
governed strictly and frequently thrashed. He also
interviewed thirty loafers to learn that tenty'seyen
of them had been 'mamas darling and the other
three had been reared by their grandmothers The
moral of this would to be that father. should
rush his kid' into the woodshed at once and thresh
him severely.
President Roosevelt has account at the Riggs
National bank in Washington. The bookkeepers have
no end of trouble keeping the presidents balance
straight because May people who get checks from
the president fail to cash them preferring to pre-
thus saved the president every year Here is an
easy way Of getting money. Make your name SO noted
that the grocer frames and ID keeps your checks.
+ A glorious new patent skating rink has been IN
vente that for real sport beats everything short Of
being engaged and holding hands The whole affair
SO that it is dream, but reality.
. The rink is parabolic floor rotated at such
speed that the centrifugal force about equals the
attraction Of grav1tation. -. - :. !.
Some very curious and interesting phenomena will
be manifest with this apparatus. While in rotation
the floor Immediately under your feet will always APP
pear level Walk from side to the other, and the
whole apparatus will to tilt over exactly as if
it floating In water, and if you infinitely
heavy and everyone else infinitely light You
can walk with perfect freedom in circumfer-
entail direction but if you walk quickly in dia-
metrical direction, you will be apparently pushed to
one side. You will find it most difficult to walk in
straight line except very slowly 1t is believed that
this system is well adapted for skating rink.
Mounted roller skates, you could perform most
that by increasing and diminishing the speed period
cay, say four times minute, the friction would dis
appear altogether, the motive power doing all the
work and the skater nothing.
It is evident that are just entering the era
Of strange illusions. The first parabatic, whirng
skating rink in this vicinity is going to get about all
the loose change in sight. .-:s~ S. - 49, =
The Baring-Go who wrote "Onwerd, Christian
Soldier and who strongly denies that he is the par
ticular BIG. who is dead is practical visionary.
When very young he had theory that the trouble
with the English upper classes too much inter-
marriage among few select families. He visited the
factories at York and picked out young and healthy
factory girl of undenable beauty. He arranged mat
tiers with her parents and had her sent to school.
After finishing her English schooling she went to
French convent and from there to finishing school
in Germany She transformed into cultivated
highly educated and beautiful young lady. Then Mr.
Barring Gould, hummng to himself Onward Christian
Sodier,'' married her. She has borne him sixteen
children all remarkably handsome, remarkably healthy
and remarkably brilliant. This is reason why
there many Barring Goulds scattered around
England looking for jobs g., ~
..'...-' 49, 49,.
But speaking Of large families, the Worthington
MIMI Globe tells Of the wives of two musicians who
met the street day One pushing baby
carriage containing three girls (trpets) The other
just her honeymoon congratulated her upon such
bliss. Upon which the proud mother said that she at
tributed it the fact that after returning from the
honeymoon the town band serenaded them playing
.sThree Little Maids from School, The young bride
threw up both hands and exclaimed: 10000
heavens!'' that same band serenaded and played
80 The Sextette from Floradora.'' "A. J. R.
The. average weight Of adult is $50 pounds, {
ounces,