The Marshall republican., 1906-12-07
rnpttSpHnS ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
HOW TO LOVE. I
The Man Should Make the First I
Advance 10 the Advice Of Helen /
Oidheld. :

Inc query. signed 'PcrplcNcd. ana
written with a touch of vcxation. not
to say temper. is not devoid Of reason.
Yet the answer Is easy and %proverbiai
Avoid extremes. There Is a medium
In all things" 1T is well TO keep to
the middle of the road. " can
II Ia a far cry from running after
n man 10 fleeing from him In aver.
sion. But Of the two extremes the
dislike Ia for the woman who shows
her own dislike: while few men care
10 be pursued. fewer still fail in nj
least contemptuous pity for the wo-
men who manifest their Willingness
to marry them before they are asked
to 10 SO. Moreover. men M we'll as
women like IN be- well thought Of:
and no man hut thinks that she who
ndmires him shows good taste and
discretion In so doing. Indeed. In spite
NJ the theory that man IL the pursucr
and woman the pursued. the woman
who gets there almost invariably IL
the one who understands how to hand
nut unlimited supplies Of sympathy
under the name OF friendship and to
show becoming surprise when the man
TO whom she burns incense invites her
10 a seat In the tempe M HIS heart
and home. Az tho saying goes. 1T Is
all In knowing how"
The woman who every day meets n
man on common ground In business mr.
In sport Is not regarded by him with
the distant reverence" which old
romances teach nm that the dcvout
lover Of former days cherished for the
lady OF his heart. Perhaps. rs We are
but human beings. n Ia quite M we'll
that We are more natural and moro
practical In our lovcmaklng nowadays.
Women are no longer brought mp 10
believe II scarcely abort Of disgrace
not TO get married. neither are they
instructed that II Is n SIN greater
disgrace 10 show tho least sign ~ will.
lngness Ia fulhl their destiny. A
hundred years ago the womnn who said
'ycs" 10 n snitor tho first time NJ ask.
Ing was held guilty Of unmaldcnly
anxiety 10 DO wed. Now. tho man
who asks n woman twice II rather the
exception IN N the rule.
Every normally minded woman vho
h honest with herself must confess TO
her own heart. II TO non other. that
marriage. rightly understood. IL tho
life for which she was intended and tho
ono In which abe would find the great
\ est and sweetest happiness for her.
self. ever though n Career might
AFFORD her n wider, perhaps n higher
sphere. II. however. the right man
falls 10 appear she IL by no means
unhappy. IL does not occur 10 hcr to
regard every marriageabie man OF her
acquaintance as n probable lover. n
possible his and; neither does she
2 imagine that all men who seem inter
ested In her conversation or who
show n liking for her company are
moditating n proposal ~ marriage
which a ten minute tcte-a.tote will
hiring forth. surely.
encouragement doos not imply pur.
ruii. and the woman VINO knows how
ran encourage n man without mani,
Testing the least disposition To run nj.
ter him. The woman who has tact can
put herself In q mans way without
seeming IN do SO. either to the man
or. what Ia stiil nfbre important. to
others. One great fact which IN be-
hooves women to remember IL this
Words are witnesses." No one may
help thoughts. but until the spoken
word expresses them they are u
secret between oneself and ones
maker. The true feminine attitude is
that Of receptivity, which may or may
not be passive, NJ circumstance first
and inclination afterwards determine.
Some men, many of them the best
require all tho encouragement one il
capable Of giving them. And when n
mar shows q disposition to make Iowa
to a woman and she likes II. she may
encourage him to do NO, yet I'm no
whit fall In maidenly modesty by 30
doing. The trouble is that men 80 Of.
ten make love without serious Inten-
lions. and when they have cause to re-
pent. like Adam are always ready to
blame the m as the tempter.
With most men an ample excuse for
any amount Of dalliance along the
primrose prth' ia that Of the urchin
In The Kiss at School," y kinder
thought she wished me to- None can
deny that the game OF lovemaking Is