The San Francisco call., 1906-05-27
By George Ade.


In undertaking a trip to foreign parts
I have had two objects in view:
(a) To strengthen and more closely ce-
ment our friendly relations with foreign
powerz-I to furnish the cement
= O0) To reform things in general over
here.
I found htat there was no opening for
a. real reformer in the L. S. A. mas
much as the magazines We're upsetting
municipal rings, cornering the beef trust
and camping on the trail of every cor
poration that seemed to be making
2. money. I said: IF I wish to make ten
fields
So I decided to fit through Europe and
spend all the time 1 could spare from
lodging table d'hote dinners to bolstering
up and regulating the consular service.
In writing today about the happy expe-
riences of an American consul am fol-
lowing the advice of a friend who urged
me to send some letters back home.
Don't put too much about your trav-
els" he said. People have read about
( European travel until they know Munich
better than they do Montana. Whenever
the opportunity presents itself write
something entirely Notwithstanding
that has nothing TO do with anything
in particular. The less you say about
foreign countries the better you will
please your readers, and if you can
arrange to write a series of letters in
which no reference is made to either
= Europe or Africa, who knows but what
you will score a hit?'
With no desire to boast of my ac-
complishments, feel that up to date ]
have followed instructions rather close
ly. If any dates, statistics or useful
information have crept into these COM
nnunications it is through oversight and
not by intention.
IN writing from Paris, the natural inn
pulse is to describe Napoleon's tomb
and tell how the Champs Elysees runs
right out to the Arc de Triomphe and
then cuts through the Bois de Boulogne.
Fearing that this subject matter has been
touched upon by other visitors, 1 shall
disregard Paris and go straight to my
task OF reforming the consular service.
To begin with, usually the American
? consul is all right in his place, but
-his place is at home. Overpaid, possibly,
bra he does his best to earn his $3.50 per
annum. If he kept all the money he
handed in the course of year he
couldn't be a really successful CRATER.
:; he finds himself pumped down in a
strange country. About the time he be-
gins. 10 learn the language and has saved
up enough money to buy evening clothes.
he is recalled and goes back home with
a. dress suit on his hands. Take the
case or Mr.. Eben Willoughby of Michi-
4 gan. IT is a simple narrative, but it will
give you a line on the shortcomings of
our consular service and ii will carry its
own moral.
=. "Oid Man. WillOughby. as he was
7Snown at home. owned and edited a
successful daily paper on the outskirts
@of the Michigan pine belt. He was a
wheel horse in the party and for forty
years had supported the caucus nom
inees. The aspiring politician who
wished TO go to Congress had TO go and
see Willoughby with his hat I'm his
hand. He helped To make and unmake
United States Senators and was consulted
regarding appointments. But he never
had asked anything for himself His
two boys went to college at Ann Arbor,
and when the younger came home with
I his degree and began to/ take a hand
in running the paper Mr.. Wiiloughby
found himself for the first time in
his life. relieved OF wearing response
bilities. he was well fixed financially
and still in the prime of life-not due to
retire permanently. hut ready to take it
essy. For years he had nursed vague
desire 10 travel beyond the limits of his
native land. Mrs. Willoughby. who in