davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14
TALK OF Tine TOWN.

DR.. o. J. Evans has filed his report as
health officer, which. shows So deaths, 81
of which were males and 81 females, dur
ing December. ...
r. F. Jones bought $4,000 pounds Of
whitefish at Winnipeg on his late trip
to that country This is new line Of
importing. The duty. on these fish was
20 per cent.
F. F. Stark has just purchased sixty
feet next adjoining Stanley Kitchelp s
place on Highland avenue, Oak Lake ad-
dition, at the rate Of $1,000 per lot of
forty-f1v feet. s, >tl---E p"
At the annual meeting Of the Centenary
Sunday school the secretary, Charles w.
Cyphers, reported the enrolment to be
$50, with an average attendance for the
past year Of 479. !'"|-~,'
The celebrated Scandinavian poet,
Bjornstjerne Bjornsen, arrived in the city
this morning, and will lecture tomorrow
evening. During his stay in this city he
will be the guest Of his countryman, DR..
Bendeke. -. .@i& ..s
D. D. Green of the city market has
bought out Frank G. Stevens & Co., No
1923 Eighth street S.. Mr.. Stevens will
more and then resume business in an
other locality. - ..s =
A Yankton dispatch conveys the graf:
| flying intelligence that Frank ]. Meade
has been appointed chief clerk Of the
house of REPRESENTATIVES forDakota. Mr.
Meade was for Several years the faithful
and efficient city clerk of this city.
The annual meeting Of the board o.
trade this morning resulted in the fol
| lowing election of officers: President
Hon. George A. Pi1lsbury; vice president
s.. c.. Gale; second vice president, F. M
Brooks; secretary, &C. c. Sturtevant
! treasurer, V. @. Hush. - ~
A Riverside avenue cardriver namet
Lyle. had started his car containing {
number Of passengers late Wednesda.
night, and as he did SO the .couplin,
broke. The horse started to run and tn
I car was towed about three blocks witt
| the reins which Lytlet held.
I The county commissioners this mornin,
approved the bond of w. E. Hale as cit.
attorney, In the sum of $1,000 as count
attorney, with T. Az Harrison and o. J
i Dean as sureties, and the bond Of G. B
Leonard as clerk Of the probate court II
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14
Made It Puff.

An Irishman travelling from Mime
apolis to Staples bought his ticket and
ran into the depot and asked an official
how long the train would be before
it started. The official said, ~"Why,
you are too late. That the train that
has just left the depot which was
yet in sight. &'|
The Irishman jumped down on the
track and started to run after it. He
was gone awhile and then came walk
ing back into the depot. The people
laughed at him and said, "Wel1, Pat,
did you catch the train?"
"N No, begorra," said Pat, "but I
made the divil puff. -
Edwin J. Oxley.
Nashua, MINI.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14
An Apt Quotation.

There was once an old man, very
religious old man, who kept drygoods
and notion store down. in st. Joseph,
Mo. He had about six or seven girls
working for him and he tried to put in
practice in business way his religious
principles. So to that end he required
every girl, whenever she made sale,
to repeat some quotation from the Bible
applicable, if possible, to. the case. -.
One, day an old countryman and his
wife came in and bought bill Of goods
that made the old mans heart rejoice.
When the old couple had gone, the old
man FASTENED over to the girl and COM
plimenting her upon her good sale, he
asked her what verse she had found
appropriate. The girl answered, And
they were strangers and we took them
in.' "A, FaWcett.
329 Delaware street.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14
Had the SYMPTOMS.

A mother was relating to her 5-year-
old son one evening the story Of the
Creation. She told how God first Gre
ated Adam, and finding that he was
lonely decided to give him a cempan-
ion. The side of Adam was pierced,
and from it rib was taken. From
this rib woman was created and pre-
scented to Adam as his wife.
The little boy listened eagerly, and
was then sent off to bed. In a short
time piercing screams were heard from
the boy s room, to. which the mother
hurried. s..-..
80 What can be the matter, Johnnie,
are you sick9'' .....-..
80, mamma, I have such a pain in
my side, I believe I am going to have
a wife, E. NJ
Breckenridge, MINI. .
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14

The regular Thursday evening prayer
meeting of Rev. Black g church was be-
ing held. After song or two, the
minister announced: "Deacon Todd
will lead us in prayer.
But the good deacon was fast asleep
and blissfully unconscious Of the minis
ter g request.
Again the minister said: "Deacon
Todd will llead.' By this time kind
ly neighbor, after vigorous punches in
the unfortunate deacor's ribs, had
succeeded in awakening him, just as
the minister Numbered forth for the
third time: "Deacon Todd will lead.
"Oh, no. drowsi1 y murmured the
deacon. IT don t lead; I just dealt. .
A. J. H.
MAYNARD Mimi
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14
Geography of the Hereafter.

Thomas H. Grisham, president of the
board of managers of the Dodge City
Soldiers Home, told reporter recent
ly story about an old soldier named
John Clark, who came near being bur
led alive. He had been i'll a long time
with typhoid fever, and at last lapsed
into a comatose state, and was pro-
nounced dead.
Burial robes were put upon him,
and he was tenderly placed in a cas-
ket to await interment on the follow
ing day. During the night Clark re-
gained his senses, and rose up in his
narrow prison. He upset the coffin,
and was sent sprawling on the floor. In
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14
The Division Of Yanktpn.

: Washington, Jan. 15.-There Is gen.
era1 opinion in favor of the division Of
Dakota into North and South Dakota.
That the two sections Of northern and
southern Dakota are entirely separated
in interests, both material and political,
is readily conceded. The opposition Will
come from the southern section, as it
would give the north two extra senators.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14
"Mutton in Fargo.'

The editor had written, if the scrawl
which confronted the compositor could
be called writing, "Multum in Parvo. =
The compositor looked at it hard. He
knew nothing Of Latin-his speciality
was setting markets. But he knew
that it was his business to "make
sense' Of whatever was put before
him. ~:
And that was how it came about that
the proofreader had to change "Mut-
ton in Fargo to the well-known Latin
-Queenie Briggs.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14
This Story Gets
THIRD PRIZE, 81.
A Slight misunderstanding.

Elizabeth, who was just years old,
heard her grandfather talk great deal
about trout fishing, etc., as he was a
great disciple of Isaak Walton.
One Sunday she was taken to the
House of Hope in St. Paul. She came
home much delighted and told her
mother that they had sung a lovely song
about "Shall we gather at the river,
where bright angels feed is trout9' -
meaning of course, where bright an
gels feet to have trod.
Elizabeth A. Piatt.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14
Derrick, N. D.
Not Dirt Enough for a Preacher.

N0V 01IV o110uSH 1oI I1o"V1o1'
A little boy Of 5 was playing in
the road one Sunday morning. In his
childish way he was trying to build
a church of mud. A. minister passed
by, and, being of an inquisitive turn
of mind, asked the little fellow what
he was doing, whereupon the boy re-
piled that he was making church.
"Ah, then,' said the minister, "you
will need preacher, too.'
But he answered: "I amt got
dirt enough to make minister
--::t.-., Carrie Olsen.
1904 Thirty-fourth Avenue s.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14

The census of the United States Ice
berg, Alaska, has been completed. There
are only 30,146 people in thesterritory, of
which 3S9 are whites. This is one citizen,
it Is estimated, to every thousand miles
of territory. 1919. - ,-s-
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14
This Story Gets
SECOND PRIZE, So.
Couldn't Smell It.

The wife Of a prominent Universalist
minister tells the following story Of
one of her ancestors Of some fifty years
ago. Upon his return from his first
visit to an orthodox Sunday school his
mother inquired: "Well, my son, what
did you learn9'
The youngster replied: "Well, J.
learned there was a heaven and I
learned there was a hell; but say, ma
he added earnestly, 81 don't believe
there is hell or we could smell it.
Mrs. T. L. O.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14

An imaginative Washington dispatch
says Blaine will resign next week. An
other says he hasn't been offered place
in the cabinet. Those two dispatches
don't hitch.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14

The Pioneer Press persists in abiding
to the Tribune as the "Bungtown Eagle"
We shall expect to see the Tribune retail
ate by calling the P. P. the Pigs Eye
screamer,'. the Ramsey Bugle," or
some such endearing epithet.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14
Maynard, MINI.
She Earned the Money,

A good story is told of ladies' aid
society, whose members were each to
earn dollar for the church, and at the
next meeting they wer each to tell
how they earned it. 49, -...-..
One lady simply said that her hus-
band gave it to her. ''But,' another
one exclaimed: "That's not earning
it, The lady replied: "You don II
know my husband. s...
MinneapOlis f=a
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14

Latest advices from New York are that
Plat is almost certain to receive the
nomination for the senate at the republi-
can caucus tomorrow evening.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14
Wanted to Go In Style.

Little Florence had been to Sunday
school and had heard about God and
heaven. One day she was asking her
mama how" God would take her to
heaven. Her mother was trying to ex-
plain it to her, when she burst out cry
ing and said, between sobs, II want to
60 with a horse and wagie." -. -.
Mrs. W. W. sigler.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14
T HE JoURN AL.
OFFICIAL Paper Of the City and County.
FRIDAY, JAN. IA, 1881.

Mcmillan has been nominated for
United States senator ''just as easy
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14
It Was No Picnic.

The woman with thirteen children
was boarding the car.
MADAM says the conductor, care
these all yours, or is it picnic?'
Says she: "They re all mine, and
it IS no picnic.''
Mrs. J. P. Baggott.
Conner Cliff Ont. Can
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14

Our Tablets will make good, healthy flesh,
create natural appetite, develop the Bust, re-
store wasted breasts lost through nursing or
sickness. Makes the cheeks plump and rosy.
clears the complexion. Vaucaire Galega Tab
lets nourish the fat producing cells, which is
necessary to give the roundness contour which
is desired and coveted by every lady of re-
fnement If you careworn. nervous, or run
| down, take box of Vaucaire Galega Tablets
injurious drugs. Highly endorsed by Beauty and
Medical authorities: $1.o0 per box. boxes for
$500. Send for booklet also free sample Of
and skin food. Be sure our name is on the
box you buy. WILLARD WHITE CO.. 1856
Dearborn ST., Chicago, Ill.
Sold by Voegeli Bros. Drug Co., Hen
! nepin and Washington avs; corner 18th st and
| Nicollet av; corner 4th ay and ed st; corner
| Lyndale and Goth n
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14
1904 Thirty-fourth Avenue s. :
HEALTH, BEAUTY
and a form sublime
to those who take
VaQCaire Galega Tablets

Flesh Food and Tonic
;OAUllUN. worthless nos
trums are being offered
and some dealers claim
them to be lust as good"
las our Tablets.
The reason they offer
imita lions is that they can
make more money on q
substitute because it does
not contain the expensive,
genuine imported Rue Ca
1ega and our own essen
tfa1 Ingredient ~
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14
Deacon Todd's Mistake.

Copper Cliff, Ont, Can.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-01-14
A Serious Operation.

Minneapolis.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1906-07-01

copies Of the bills were still undelivered, il
was suggested to the President that it was
useless to wait any longer. He was told
that when the bills were ready they would
be sem to him at the White House.
"All right, he assented and said good-by
TO every one.
As he left the Presidents room he stopped
to shake hands with two Senate. pages and
oomplimented them on their bright and neat y
Charley Loef1er,' said Sergeant alarms
Ransdell of the Senate. Charley Loefier
is a retired Major Of the Regular army who
has served for many years at the White
House as personal doorkeeper Of the Presi-
dent 3 private Office.
@Then they have an additional claim on
me-" responded Mr.. Roosevelt with a smile
as he shook hands with the boys again,
When the President got back to the White
House he had dinner. Late tonight the
delayed bills were presented to him and
signed. He left at 1880 o'clock over the
Pennsylvania for Jersey City and will go
thence tomorrow morning to Oyster Bay,
where Mrs. Roosevelt and he children are
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1906-07-01

went to the White House. Another reosss
of the SENATE was then ordered until $40.
just before adjournment MT. BLACKBURN
Of Kentucky, leader Of the minority, pre-
sented the following:
Resolved, That the thanks Of the Senate
are hereby rendered to the Vioe-Presiden
for the dlgnided, impartial and courteous
manner In which he has preaided over Ito
deliberations during the present session.
The resolution was unanifnously adopted,
whereupon Vice-P President Fairbanks 70
sponded a. follows:
Senators, / shall always hold In grateful re-
membranoe the resolution you have adopted
personal to myself. Permit me to express
to you my deep sense OF obligation OF the
uniform courtesy. kindness and assistance
which the chair has received from both sides
Of the Chamber.
The session which is'olosing has been a pro-
tracted and arduous one, Great questions
have been debated In a name worthy OF
the best traditions of the Senate, Many
sharp differences Of opinion have been dis
closed In the progl sss Of the discussions.
but they have been only such as must natur-
ally arise In q forum where public measures
Of magnitude are determined after mature
elaboration. There has been, Of course.
entire accord among Senators In patriotic
purpose.
trust that at the close Of the vacation
upon which you are about to enter you may
return safely and in health to resume your
important service In behalf Of the republic.
The hour for the adjournment Of the first
session Of the Fifth -ninth Congress havin 9
arrived, 1t becomes my duty to declare the
Senate adjourned without day.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1906-07-01

Tectlng the Committee on Printing to In
quire into the reasons Sor delay at the Gov
eminent Printing 0doe In furnishing
printed copies Of bills and joint.Tesolutlons,
and especially on the lastsdayr Of tho sas-
sion.
The Senate committees for vsoweral days
past, he said. had experienced the most
exasperating delays In obtaining printed
copies Of the great appropriation bills and
their, work had been greatly hampered
thereby. suoh q thing had y occurred
before-in fact, the prompt mannerin which
they had done the work In the past had ex-
cited his highest admiration. IL might be
due TO the fact that the new Public Printer
has not before had experience in that
Office, or that he had not yet got'l II SUM-
oientty r~eorganized.
Mr.. Cullom Of Illinois i~nteFruptedsto say
that Il was only fair to state that tbs Public
Printer, Mr.. Stiilings, had not bsen' at bis
Office for two weeks, having b cen III.
The resolution was adopted.
The. House adjourned promptly at 10
o'clock, the Senate . few minutes hter.
the Senate there were eleven Republicans
and six Democratic on. the floor. These
began TO clap their hands and the galleries,
which were crowded, joined in. Their
everybody oheered. This was unpreoe-
dented In that dignihed body.
In the House h ADJOURNMENT was
marked by more stirring scenes; Repre-
ology,' and half Of those on the foor threw
bits OF paper into the air by the handful,
There was more singing n some cheering
before the Hour members lef:.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1906-07-01
DIED. esR

FISHER.-At his summer home. Alenhurst. n, j..
Peter Fisher of Sayrevtle. N. j. in the esth
year Of his age.
Funeral services will be held az his late residence.
Sayreville. N. j.. on Monday. July 2, az . P. NJ.
IRvING.-At Boonsboro. Nd. on June fs, 1905,
Henry Irving. son Of tho late John T reat and
Helen scnermerhorn Irving, aged IS years.
Funeral services and Inter ment In Washington
ID. Q.
MUIR.-At Orange. N. j.. on Friday June 20 1900
David Muir, aged % years.
Funeral services will be held al his late residence
Is Randolph place. Mountain Station. Orange,
ON Sunday, July /, at 8 p. N. Intermcnt az
Greenwood Cemetery at convenience OF inc
family.
STOKES.-At Ailenhunt. N. j.. on June ~ ls"
Joseph. son of Joseph o. and Sarah W. s'oSe''
In the 10th year Of his age.
The relatives and friends are invited TO aHen'
the services at the residence Of william 'In
Stokes, Trenton, 2is West state ST.. or Mohua'
afternoon at 2 o'clock. lntermen' d. "''N
wood Cemetery. Trenton. y. j. -
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1906-07-01
Army and Navy Orders.

WASHINGTON, June @.-rh ess army orders were
issued to-day:
A board Of ornoers TO eonsis, Of Major ormond
Tracy g. pteLson. torsnaSes Department: Is sp:
fns n slsisl: ono ofSosis Tor detail eHi's % captains a. o" IN ne1 ne
Ordnance Department,
col. Oliver z. Wood, to Coast Artillery.
lieut. Col. John r. Williams. TO Coast Artillery.
Second Lieut.. Hugh 8. Johnson, Ftret Cavalry,
First Lieut.. Alfred A. Maybach, Artillery, A.
siened temporarily to commend the Col. Georre
Lloyd England. Artillery, ordered 70 Washington.
Hsut. Msybach win report to the commandment OF
the school OF submarine defence, Fort Totten.
These navy orders were issued:
Lieutenant Commander L. n. Chandler, from
Warrington 20 navy yard, New York.
Lieutenant Commander II. H. christy. TO Naval
Lieut.. 3. L. Arnold. from the Lancaster 70 tn.
Ensign ]. g. Kress, to the brooklyn.
Ensign W. L. Pryor and MidshipInen B, II. Green
and n. e. Shosmakez, from the lancaster 70 The
Midshipmen. r. s.. Mcdonald and ]. p. oldins
from the Charieston 70 the Lancaster.
Mdshipman N. H. Goes. from The Maine 10 the
Charleston.
Asslstsns sursson p. s. Rossitsr, to Nsvai
Assistant Sureeon J. ". Bsekus, to the Funhiin.
Paymsstet D.. v. Chadwick, 20 the BrooAlyn.
Civil Engineer J. v. Rockwell from naval siatlon
San Juan. p. n. 10 navy yard MARI Island.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1906-07-01
VIRGINIA GETS THE MONEY.
And Through Mr.. Maynard Accepts Mr.;
Payne's Apology and the Appropriation.

And Through Mr.. Maynard Accepts MIR.
Payne's Apology and the Appropriation.
WASHINGTON, June SO.-While the House
had nothing more important to engage its
time and attention this morning two mem
bers Of the Virginia delegation, Messrs.
Jones and Maynard, sought to impress
members with the fact that Mr.. Payne Of
New York had no ground for his statement
yesterday that when Congress passed the
$3.50 900 appropriation last year for the
jamestown exposition no application would
be made for more money.
Mr.. Maynard said that the victory would
be robbed Of half its sweetness II an impu-
tat.on Of ad faith was permitted to 60
IL lcnailenged. The assertion Of the gentle
man from New York, he said. reminded
him OF the conversation between two
negroes about money matters.
sam, = said one Of them, my wife pesters
me most to death for monsyft,f ~ 81 to-day,
"a Tomorrow and $3.50 the next day
what does your wife do with all that
mo ney9" the other asked.
Deed, ! don know was the answe
Il don never give her none.'
And 30, Mr.. Maynard said. he didn't
KNOW wnere MI FHyne 8oI his assurancos
None OF the Virginia delegation didn'
never give HIM none
Mr. Payne responded in good humor
that he believed he had such assurances,
and repeated that he had been, was now
and would be evermore until the end OPP
posed to the appropriations for these ex-
positions.
Mr.. Olmsted-I hope the gentleman from
Virginia will accept the apology Of the
gentleman from New York.
Mr.. Maynard-oh, certainly, and the
appropriation.
And amid the laughter. accompanying
this retort the incident ended.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1906-07-01
NOMINATIONS THAI FAILED.
Members or Canal Commission and MagOon
to he Minister TO Panama.

10 re minister 10 Fuilhuia'
WASHINGTON ,.June 3O.-The list Of nomi-
nations not confirmed by the Senate In
clude those OF Chairman Shonts, Secretary
Joseph Buoklin Bishop and Charles E. Ma:
room, BENJAMIN NJ. Harrod, Col. Oswald H.
Ernst, Brig. Gen. Peter c. Haines and Civil
Engineer Mordecai T. Endioott, members OF
the Isthmian Canal Commission, and OF MI.
Magoon to be Minister to the Panama Re-
public. The Senate once confirmed these
nominations, but afterward, at the request
Of the Committee on ~Interoceanio Canals,
resoinded that action.
: Others on the list are: James Wicker
sham. to be Judge of the District Court In
Alaska. whose confirmation has been OPP
posed for nearly three years by Senators
McCumber, Hansbrough and Nelson; Will
lam C.. Bristol, to be United States Attorney
for the District OF Oregon; John Embry. to
be United States Attorney for the District
Of Oklahoma; Robert R. S.. Bergh Of North
Dakota, to be Consul at Dusseldorf, and
the following postmasters;
Alabama-W. J.. Leppert, at Camden; W. W.
Pridgen. at Evergreen.
North Carolina-Cyrus P Frazier, at Greens
boro; Louis N. Grant. at Uoldsboro.
North Dakota-Emtly ID. Prairie, at Portal.
New York-Willard p. Sherwood. Honell.
formerly Hornelsvllle).
Ohlo-wiliam p. Dowley. at Marlonvllle. Z
Pennsylvania Perry A. Sanborn. North
east.
South Dakota-ueorge Reed. Arlington
Frank 8. Myers. Redfeld; Delbert W. VIII
marth, Desmet; Robert q. Bennett. Beresford
John D. Cotter, Parker John Reich. Scotland
Texas-Dalas Harbeit. Commerce: David
II. Robinson, Dallas.
During the session but one nomination
was reiected-that OF Edward A. Winstan'
Icy, to be receiver Of public moneys ct Mis-
soula, Mont, who wa subsequently, 70
nominated and confirmed.