The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1906-08-13

prolonged incumbcncy Of the queea's
bench. had made known his intention
10 resign. nevertheless rcappcared at
Westminster hall, was asked by Sir
Alexander Cockburn to explain 'hc
fact. why" said Sir William, Il did
mean to. but when went home and
told my wife she said. Why. william.
what ON earth do you think we can
DO with you messing around the house
sll day. So. YOU see. was oblig d
10 come down to court again."-Kan.
Eas City Star.
MY friend said the agent To the
Bi!iyille brother. let me sen you an
accident policy
Never had an accident In my life"
hut you may have. Amt you about
C. mary?"
yes; but what's that got TO do with
H9"
a great deal Suppose your wife
WAS to get angry v,th YOU and lam
S,a sidc the head v.'h fi-c shovel.
ur your mothorm Jaw might take q
notion TO break every bone In yor,
bOdy-or="
But the Bilvillc brother stopped him
sisht thorc.
i've thought of ~" he said; I'm b,
burned n get married. Atlanta
Constitution.
\ drummer was Iga5ing a corn n7ll
in Floyd county Virginia. lie saw q
hoy In the field. The corn did not
ioos very promig'rg ara 'hc folloS-
ing conversation Jccl'-sl:
Drummcr-"Your corn loot,s very
yUllow.
Boy-"Wc planted TIE yellow Lind.
Drummcr-'lt does uot ilck NE
you will get more ib.I half q crop"
Boy-'lt makes 40 dir fcr,o. us We
cnl" rct half of u, auywis"
Drummor-"You mr5t net be ,dy
Ear from fool
Roy-"No. sir 'n' fence Is lust b.
tween us. Magasi - of Fun.
o
During the canvass of his tgte In
1889 10 gather ,o.n3 enough TO send
him To the lower house Of congress.
Nc LongNorth went 10 the western
end OF his county tl become acquaiit
ed and To capture votes. Now IA,
town of Harrison is partly I'm Indiana
and partly in Ohio. the center of jho
main thoroughfare being M dividing
line. Going into store Mr.. Long.
worth made himself very agreeable
with the proprietor. bought cigars t1r
the crowd, pollied every one, and th"n
asked II they were going TO vote for
him. There was long, loud laugh.
and when It was over the Ohioan ask
cd:
What rs so funny?"
''oh. nothing remarked the pro
prietor, except that YOU are cH the
Indiana side of the street Your Ohio
voters are across the way"
MI. Longworth was hoi'i % uur.
rur a structure ON toGls That aea an
the dividing line. at u.a ,yl1, ,ime
making a quick jump INTO ph.o -. ip.
pincott's.
Matt w. Ransom, late senator from
North Carolina made politeness a
point Of conscience. One day he saw
the very worst bore OF his acquaiut.
ance aud with a short "Howdy do?"
brushed swiftly past. The bore, oyl.
IDENTITY hurt, proceeded sadly Ran
SONS conscience smoto him. After
ten steps he turned back and with a
pleasant smile called back: "Goodby
simpkins. I've been thinking a mighty
heap about you lately, symptoms. but
don't come back, Simpkr8, don't come
hack. Kansas city star
=
Henry E. DiXoy who Is running into
warm weather I'm The Man On the
PoN,' at he Lyric, was seated M the
Cafe Martin the other night discuss.
lug the "gilded youth"
Now, there's chap said Dixey,
nOddlng toward a member of the ex-
elusive cntillion set, who had just en-.
tered, that | met while ago. lie
didn't strike me particularly
proiudlced against men who talk In
s'irano voices Next time I It hln