New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-02-07
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

In a whskey tried at Concordia, Kan. last
week. OF the witnesses was asked what he
understood a nuisance under the prohibitory law
to be- to which he made the following answer: "A
place where man goes in at the front door his
feet apparently in his sober senses, and is hauled
out at the hind door his back like dog"
ofd Friends.--The W1fe-what luck7
The Husband Cweariy)-None whatever.
The Wtfe-Were there no servants in the tntelli-
gence office?
The Husband (sadly)--Lots OF them: but they had
all worked for us acknowledgements Home Com
panion.
1t Tuesday morning. The clothes had been
washed. dried and folded. and common point
ed to the fact that it ironing day; but eau
dous Scandinavian Title, the maid. not
going to make the mistake OF going ahead before
being sure that she right Before committing
herself to the obvious task according to The
Youths Companion" she poked her head into the
dining room 10 say appealingy, ''Meesis skuld
like to speak something What Is IT, TfieY'
'Skal cook natiron?' asked T1llle earnestly
Satisfactorily Located.-OId Bill Missgimmons, OF
Beeville. remarked TO Tom Pendergrast, he sat
down gingerly on one edge of a drygoods box:
Tom, did you ever see a gol durn boil just where
Yes said Tom 1.-The one on YOU is exactly all
right for me."-(kansas City Journal.
Ten years ago there were $50 Americans In the
City OF Mexico. The directory printed last De-
cernber shows 6745. Prohibition has in some meas
ure struck the town A law recently passed
closing saloons at o'clock and 'puloue joints at
8 In the evening.
A BIOGRAPHY IN INsrALMENTS.
When s r We Smith Smith vas was one day old
some trinkets for his hands to hold.
His bonnet and his bib
IN fact. the necessary raiment,
Upon an easy weekly payment
When Willie Smith was quite a lad
He was like other boys;
His complement of toys
His father laid out every Sunday
Inc payment TO be made on Monday.
When Billy Smith had finished school
To college he was sent.
His mother said: Pa send him. YOUTH
Be very glad he went"
So Billy went. but on condition
Each week they'd send his tuition
When William Johnson Smith was wed
To their new furnished home. instead
or TO boarding house.
Each week they could remit t tWelSe-nfty.
When William Smith (the second came
HIS di;,,f father bought t crib
A bonnet and bib.
Each , week the grim collectors call meant
ndH 70 D. Pay Nesb fm in l nssa@gnt
The late Bishop Mandel Cre,ehton was onco
asked the difference between an Oxford man and a
Cambridge man. The professor as he then was
Immediately replied: AN Oxford man looks as If
the world belonged to him; Cambridge man as
If he didn't care to whom the world belonged
MdtiiHIoHidl-Inree Germans sitting
luncheon recently. and were overheard discussInr
the second marriage OF mutual friend when one
or them remarked: ''Pn tell you what 4 man
what narres de second time don't deservc to hava
lost his first Vife."-(I4ife
great delicacy In Florida, according 70 ..The
Cleveland Leader" is the tip OF an alligator's tail
1t tastes ike frogs legs. though bit more gamey
Alligator tails are best just after the ricebird sea-
SON inc Dig alligators float in the water with
only their eyes showing. When they see q nocz op
these fat juicy little birds they dive to the bottom
Their long. wide snout scoups I'D some of The Ioar,
ana they noat TO the surface again with tust the
rich SOIL showing. The birds think IL is nm ,sIsnd
They aiight upon IT. When the whole family is there
the big reptile turns suddenly. Just as the b,r1s
scramble e. OH ne opens his mouth once They are
gone. The birds are neat little faadars ~, 80
alligator Is an epicure at this time OF the wear
Ihe rcebird diet makes the tip OF his tail OF which
he Is most vain. tender and sweet
man "a s OF revolutions" began the loquacious
MAJ an was the central figure in one myself once -
Somewhere In South America ~ vii 0'iSe-
mo IN Massachusetts. / got cauvh, o. ~. 49,.
iis u "ooileh miiL'-CPhiladelphia Ledger