The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1906-02-28

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Humpy tickled the legs Of half a dozen
men. almost ran into three stores and
scared q grocer's horse into a runaway
but his ardor didn't abate until he
struck a fat man and brought him
down with a great crash.
A cObbler ran out Of his shop and
seized the boy and barrow until it
could be ascertained whether the fat
man had been killed on the spot or
only crippled for life and out Of the
political reform movement. 1t was
two minutes before the question was
decided. Then the fat man rose up
and began to talk. He called Humpy
Skinner about $50 bad names. He
threatened him with over 200 different
kinds Of punishments. He abused his
father and vowed he would never take
his hat off to his mother. and the way
he did rip that old wheelbarrow up the
back put a new wabble in the wheel.
Il don't know what this is all about"
said Humpy, when the fat man had
finally got out Of breath.
"But you run him over NIT dot wheel
barrow" explained the cobbler.
"Rut how could I help It? Haven't
a right to chase a boy with a wheel
barrow" u.
maybe SO. but hat you some rights
to run a fat man over?"
But he got in the way. When he
saw me coming why didn't he climb a
fence or dodge into n store?"
"Hear the cold blooded young villain
talk" groaned the victim. "Why, boy
why-why"-
And then he swelled up again and
grew red in the face and gasped for
breath and could say no more. The
cobbler went to pat him on the back
and lead him into a sewing machine
place where new and secondhand ma
chimes were sold on the installment
plan. and Hu1npy took advantage of
the occasion to make his escape.
He was sobered up a little as he
passed on, but only for a short time.
Ee saw 4 large dog standing on the
corner while its master was in the
drug store to get something for a cold
in the head. The dog was looking
across the street at a red headed boy
who was washing a store window, and
he hadn't the slightest idea that his life
was in peril. No sooner had Humpy
caught sight Of the canine than he had
a plan. 1t was to strike the dog fair
in the middle with the wheel of his
barrow and throw him thirty feet high,
the same as if he had been caught on a
cowcatcher.
1t was d run of a hundred feet with
no one in the way, and Humpy got up
steam to beat an express. The Wheel
barrow wabbled about, but for the last
ten feet it kept a straight course. The
dog was still looking at the red headed
boy and wondering If he ever stole har-
vest apples out in the country, when
all at once the wheel struck him. He
went down, instead Of up, and Humpy
and the barrow went over him. Boy,
dog and barrow were piled In a heap.
The dog recovered himself first and bit
the boy and the barrow, and Humpy's
bowls soon collected a crowd. Some Of
them said that a building had collapsed
and killed seven men and others that
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but the policeman who came running
up soon Strengthened out things.
II want this boy hanged to a tree
for trying to kill my dog!" demanded
the owner as the cold in his head grew
better.
II can't do that" replied the officer,
but IL l ever catch him out with a
w~heelbarrow again he shall go to state
prison. Boy. take your internal ma
chine and make for home!"
"Where's the sand, Humpy" asked
his mother as he came limping into the
house.
In reply he burst into tears.
Dear Inc, but what is the matter
with you"
""The matter is that this Is no town
for a boy. The people are not willing
to let him enjoy himself and have a
good time" NJ. QUAD.