davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Der Sonntagsbote. (Milwaukee, Wis.) 1906-1912, 1906-04-15
0tutf4 sQfrifa.
Bgr.in, 9. Qlpril

Der GsnsruItoHiuI Redsnberg in
Mostdu 1T gum y9a4folger oes Wlas
iors GraieH p. g0Ben ais @ouoerneur
bon 9euti4zSitairiid erHdnnt pors
OtH.
Der Sonntagsbote. (Milwaukee, Wis.) 1906-1912, 1906-04-15
Der RougreB.
@aIbingtoH, II. 2lprif.
Senot.

sSu Ser beutigeR Sibuno ortidte ser
Senator aIbri9 Bic 2lnIi6t aug. saB
6ds @noe 0sr gtneraloebatte ii6er bic
GifenbahRratenbiq unfheinenO bpr
Gnoe Der gegsntportissn @o6s sinlrss
ten tperbe uno bdB bann Elm ginbers
itdH0niB iiber eiHen Gag fir bic 9l6s
thinning errei9t ipsr0sn tonne. Die
GrtIdrung ipurOe oIs glnfuort auf
siHe 6oroeruHg oes Senator's Gilman
Fir Elm iol6es giHosrne6men asqsbgn.
Sine iDsitsre 0iscuiTon 0es gelebsg
fanO beute nidt fat, ba teiH Genasor
iih bdrauf oOrbersttst bate, cine Rso.
Al haltsH. 4ngetda5igt purOs, oab
Der Sonntagsbote. (Milwaukee, Wis.) 1906-1912, 1906-04-15
@ G6Iedfes Del
MiOolstOu. Conn, II. 9lpriI

WtIooleton, Conn.,, IL. Npril.
SIN SupsriOrgeri1t pur0e Slohn
goplan, Elm QgsNt ser Stan6arS Oil
Gompunn, nm $50 beItruft uno auBerz
Dem su 40tGgiger 9efdngniBtrafe
berurtbeilt, neil er Sel BON Ibledlter
uno gefdbrli9er aualitGt DertauFf
bate. Der &lagsfaG gegen goplan
bilbete sine 5Ortiesuug Scr 3ipiltluoe
bon SbsOoOr Dbits geeen 6is Stan<
barb Sil gompanp. SSm sSanuar err
plooirts cine SeIldmps in 8bite's
8obnung, pO0ur6 cine Softer
Dbite's 10 fatper 0erIest puroe, oaB
fie an osn 5oIgeu ftarb. 9lu9 @bite
trug ihfDere granopunOen babon.
Wbite ma9te barauf sine S6a0enz
eriastIase sum getrage bon $4,000
onbdneig, neil nah elmer BON Dem
grof. gro0Isp ungsitsuten llnterIuz
dung Die ibledte 2udlitGt oes Selg
Die @Tplofion berdnIaBte.
Iurim 9orTp.
glen gorf, II. Qlpril.
Gin 0olmetlher srtldrte beute i'm
HGmen bon Wlagtm GortD, oaB 'er
nid1t mad Qnerif1 gefommen fsi, I'm
6ilfe fur oie syrsibeit RuBldno's 5u
erlGHgen, iou0eru i'm SntereiIe Ieiner
sigenen 9eIunoheit, oa er an S6pinoz
iuht leioe. Gr fper6e aug oiefem
@ruHoe IN einigen Wo6en na9 Dem
Der. SOL, geben. Wdbrenb er in RsD
gorf Iei, ipple er itiHe8iograpbie bols
snoen uno 0isIslbe in bic 6dnoe eiHss
gerldgsbuhbdnoIers Ieasn. Gr pone
oiefe @rbeit erIeoigen. fous feline oIte
9eiunobeit nid5t iuieoer berqeIteIIt pers
ben iollte. Gr isi bereits ldHoere 3eit
ous RuBluno fort unp babe feline eSoee
BON Dem eegeHtpdrtigen 3uftan0e Der
9inse, gloube aber nibt, SAP Sic Quss
fidt fir cine Rsbolution beIonoers
eiinifig fei. Die Bette 3utunFt fir eis
nsn Rufeu i6eiue oarin az liegtn,
Don RubIdno fort5ugsbeu.
Qus Qusoer8un6esbdubtHa5t
DGIbington, II. glbril.
gsri6ts iiber Reibuneen snfhsn
ruiliidhen uno dineiiiden Sruppen in
Der Tonoihurei iinO our GenntniB
oes Staotsoepdrtemenis geIauat. On
oer Stsns, no ois iibirifds Giisn6a6n
uHo oie 8abH mad Bort artbur uRo
2oIn1 ibren 4noteapuHit ba6en, fte6en
iapanii6e SruppeH uRb in aerinaer
GziTeTuuan ou0Ou pir6 bic 8abH BON
Der Sonntagsbote. (Milwaukee, Wis.) 1906-1912, 1906-04-15

renee, &rof. g5athaHiel \. Sbaler, iIt
beute an SrngeneHt3in0ung eeitor.
ben.
Der Sonntagsbote. (Milwaukee, Wis.) 1906-1912, 1906-04-15
gabuunfaGL
9pife. oSbahp. III. llpril.

BoIle, 5odbo, II. NprIl.
Sin 3uIdmmsuitoB ouf Der 8. R.
&c q. Giienbabn fano beute MOrgen
1 lIbr 80 10 Wlsilen ipeittitb pon
SuntingtOH apiIden Dem gdFagiers
5uge 9lo. So uuo eiuem 2lrbeits3uge
itdtt, BEL Dem elm gtann get00tet, Elm
anoerer t60tlicb uno elm peiterer
Idtper berIeBt tpurOen. Soot 1T sobn
2iqp BON ga 9ranOe, Sr., unb tDOts
Ii9 DerIeBt elmer Carl BON qortIano.
Der llnfdn fdn6 infOlge oes 9ers
feBlens zines 9elesrapbiItsn fatt, Dem
grtrd3uqe SrOer All aeben.
Der Sonntagsbote. (Milwaukee, Wis.) 1906-1912, 1906-04-15
&oBIsRf5r6ern6e Gifsns
bd bRen.
Mafhin0tOn ID. 9[pril.

~ ~ - y - ~ -
Die 3pii9euitaatIi6e SanoeIsfomr
miIiion, tpeI9s fi9 nit ben @ei6dfts.
metbooen Der 4oblen f0rOernoen 81.
Ienbabnel beI6dftist, bat bis isbt er.
mittelt, oaB Die Giisu6abHsn, pel3,
@ei9tobIen no9 osn 6ltIi6eH Safen.
itdoten bsf0r0ern, Die 5radten untei
il9 DsrtbeiIsH unO ouB Elm oabiuge.
ben6ss lIsbereiuiOmmen felt 10 Sab
rem beffeht.
Der Sonntagsbote. (Milwaukee, Wis.) 1906-1912, 1906-04-15
QpIttif@eA
Indianapolis, sSn0., II. Qlpri7

NSHDluHupptIsi rSHD-, IL. Aplt.
Sn Der bier abgsbuItensn repu6lifas
ui1hen Transformation nuroe cine
9ldtform dngenommen. peIhe ii1 nit
sen 6dubluugen 0es QrdiiOeRten
RoOTepeIt, 0es Disqualification 6air.
bants uno oeH SeRatoren uno glbgss
oroneten BON ssSnoiaua sinDeritanosn
ertldri, Die 4nuabme zines 5rad]t=
ratenqeIeBes befiirpDrtet, pel6ss allen
Sbeilen 9ere6t miro, uuo Osm S6uBs
3on oas 0ort reoet. eluberosm ers
ilGrt fi5 oie &onpention aur 9lnnahme
zines StautsseIeBes, tpoHa9 Ole Giiens
babnen in Snoiana fir bic Perionens
befOrOeruug uiht iiber 2 Gents fir bic
Uteile berehuen oiirfen.
Der Sonntagsbote. (Milwaukee, Wis.) 1906-1912, 1906-04-15

Gin Sbuoitot. bem 9. +. Ooatum
BON Den Rod SslaH6 uHo GriBeo Sps
Itemen angeb0rt, plant ben 8ou elmer
eiIenbdbH bon Saliua Gru8, 0em
@ubpuntie Der Sebundtepsc giIenbabn
an Der pa3ifii6en &uIte emlanq oie
0]eittiiite n0rolih naG Mdn3dniIlo.
@s 1T tuobribeiHlia, bag oie ueue
Qinie n6rOlid Bis 3ur ameritaniI6su
GreH5e fortgeIebt uno bort NIT benz
Rod SsIdHo Spitem berbuHOsn iDeroep
miro.
Der Sonntagsbote. (Milwaukee, Wis.) 1906-1912, 1906-04-15
gRertIo.
Wlerito, 10. Qlprtl

Die 9epeguug 3ur Griin6ana elmer
neueH englii4soeutiden 9anl ioa ios
peit ge0ieben Iein, bdB Ole .DeuiIhe
iiberieeiids 8ant", peI6e bier Elm
3peiageiddft unterbdlt, nit benz
neaen llnternebmen beri6mol3en pirb.
2ln lebterem iino au9 eine Qln3abl
glen gorter 8antiers 6etbeitiat. Sc
ioa oas fdrtiis 5inon3inIiitut I'M
Qdn0e per6en.
Der Sonntagsbote. (Milwaukee, Wis.) 1906-1912, 1906-04-15
RodtftfGet
9lep Q)ori, no. Qlpril.

Sobn .. Rodefeutr bat ieinem 9ers
itedipieI Elm Gnoe aema6t. gr perlieB
IeiHen 9aH0iis in 9dtepooo un0 tam
nah Rem gorf. Dem 9erne6meu nab
belt er Iib bier nut cine tur3e 3eil
dui um Odnn Han Oem 9dnoIib ieines
Sobnes in BEN Bocauticc 0ils su fab
rem, po Ct sum eritsu Rale leinen
@nteI Sobu .. III. lab. rad aeu
gort 5uriidgetebrt, ities er in leiner
hieii9eH gBobuung ab.
3ufdmmenbrud.
9ittSburg, pa, 10. 9Ipril.
9rei Stodperte oes tiinfit6diaen
@eBduoes glo. 622 9ibertg Qpeme.
meI6es abgebrohen miro. fiirsten sus
Iammen uHo mebrere Irbeiter puroen
unter 0en Eriimmeru begraben. 3lpei
BON ben decentralization mur0en ans
Sdgeslidt gebpaht Sie batten nur
Ieidte 8erIeBun9en erlittsu, bob miro
befiirdtet. odB nod flint 9lr6eiter uus
ter oen Sriimmern lieoen.
Gdrnesis's 9eufiouen.
glep gorf, 10. Qlpril.
Die Sruitses Der GarHeoie iden
Stiftung bsbufs 6Droeruug ser grs
siebungsaHitaI!su troten SuIammeu,
nm beitimmte 3egeIn fir Die 9ertbti-
lung Der peniioHen auf3uItellen. Der
foIseuoe 8ei9IuB gsIanate CUR Qlns
ndbme: nSrgen0 Elm WIdnn i'm 2llter
BON 65 sSdbreH, ipelher min6cIiens 10
Sabre ais profeHor in elmer anertdnus
ten 8iIoungsdnItdIt Iebrte. Ioa. i'm
San er idbrIi6 $1,000 cher peniler
srbdIt, cine YenIion ron $1,000 ems
pfdugeu. Disienigen 9rofeIIoren
oersu GjebaIt iitb iiber $1,000 belief
Tolen fir ie 500 bic Summe BON
$50 mebr erbdlteu, oo6 Iou feline BEN
Iton Die Samme bon $1,000 ii6erIteis
gen"
Die Stiftuug 6sIduft Ii5 au5
$500,000 idbrtid.
S o 2 en- o oer n DE y ne n
ba bnen.
4bilabeIpbid, 10. Qpril.
SnfOlge elmer gemetuIamen, BON BEL.
oeH 6duieru oes Songrefes angenom.
menen Reiolutipn trat 0ie 3pii6en.
itdatIide 6dn0eIstommiiTon beute bier
5uiammen, nm einellnteriu6uug 6arii.
Der an5uitenen, oh Die Giieubo6neH
psIde &obIsn uuo Sel beF0rOern, Elm
oirsites SntereHe in oieien 9roOulieu
babeu. Die boberen geomten Der
peunIplpdnia uno Der philadelphia &c
Reaoing 8dbn itno porgeIaoen ipOroen,
um Qustunft 81 geben. 0o6 foIlen
aud an0ere 9abneu an ole Reibe tom.
men.
Der Sonntagsbote. (Milwaukee, Wis.) 1906-1912, 1906-04-15

SpringfielO, II. Qlbri


Der Gntpurf oss generaIannalts
SteaO fir elm ueuss 9orpabienaeIeB
puroe beuts Ra9mittag Ser Qeaislaiur
boreeIegt. Ginem 5auptpuntt OieTes
gutpurfs sufoIge ipiro Der Ranoibat.
nel6er in Der 9orDa6l cine gluralis
tat bon 35 grp5srt Ser BON ieiner
9drtei obgegebenen Stimmen erbdIt.
au6 obne cine aonbention dls nomis
nirt angeiebsu. SnosB IolIen IoDobI
Die &anoi0aten fir Die 9fi6terdmter,
tpie audi Die GoITtptommiTdre in Der
friibersn Weiie nOminirt rsroen, nm,
ioipeit bis 3i9ter in 8etra6t fomnen,
ole purtsipOIitit aus Dem Spiel gu
Iahen.
Gs lit onSunebmen, oaB oieIe @ors
lage nod peri6ieosus QsnOerungeu ers
fabrsn miro, ebe Iis 5ur QHnabme ees
Iangt.
Der Sonntagsbote. (Milwaukee, Wis.) 1906-1912, 1906-04-15
g2sn gorf, IL. qtpriI.

Die perOerblide Sbdti9teit oes 8e.
TuD tann bielIei6t bic 2lntunFt oer
nmsritaniI6en 2ltbIsteR per36gern
pelds Ii6 an Sen Ol1mpif6eu Spie.
len in QtbeT betbsiliqeu DoIleu. 9el
9ampfsr ,garbarofd", iDeItr BIZ
QtbIeten na5 Reapel bringt, pirt
bort am 19. gpriI dntommen. Dem
ReiIepIan 3ufolge IoIteu Die Qttbleteu
BON Redpel nit Der 8aba nod grins
otii fabren, um DON bort uah Qtbs1
eingei9ifft gu iDerOeu, bod iit es in
bObem @rdoe tpabribeinIih, 0aB Oas
betreffenoe gabuostt in5piIden nit
2a0a beoedt Duroe, oie 8dhnoerbin=
Dung nah 9rtR0iIt olio obgebro5en
iit. Da nun Die GiIsnbabnosrbinoun=
gen i'm 5iioli5eu Stdlien Wanhes 81
iUiiniaen iibrig la6en, miro Is Ben
9ltbleten unmogIi9 iein, @rin01f friihs
3eitig genug 81 srreibeu. WaH hofft.
0dB eie grie6ii6e 8sgisruug Elm 9as
nonenboot entfenoen un6 Die @dite ppn
geupeI ouf Dem 8aferpege nab ib=
rem 9eitimmungsOrt briHgen Dirb.
Der aougrsB.
@dibingtoH, IL. 9lprii.
Der Sonntagsbote. (Milwaukee, Wis.) 1906-1912, 1906-04-15
@eGebrter seitOrben

DnInDrIO8e, ItlII., 10. NprI.
Ger beribmte GjeolOge uu0 9efcn
bcr ruiiieni5oitIidea S6aiIe IN 2aiD-
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
The Garden Habit.

A garden IA Il pleasant spo
Where you raise peas and all SUCH
truck
And merry hndes. like as not,
II you are somewhat shy on luck.
With hopes as large as "A balloon
YOU 80 forth with your little hoe
Some wafl and ss,iiy afternoon
TIC plant the soeGs you mean to grow.
The n%elghbors' chickens stand around.
And from The corner OF their eye
They watch you digging mp the ground
Where they will froiic by and BY.
The cn,wor:n sc ccty mods Its head
And .aug..a until II has "a III
To trims about YOU SarCen bed
Ana Things It's tribe win 10 TO II
Your Wife. with na approving smile.
Comes out and says It's just too cute
Fer IN, thiig and quite the style
And thai she always Gid Ike frnit.
And. though you do not like 70 brag
About TIE talnas you're going 10 raisss
You tell her she'll be- playing tag
With raeishes In thirty days.
II really ;. ems 4 cruel thing
Thc truth pom u man 20 force'
Blu, Thirty days viii only bring
A Gran Of weeds and SOME remorve.
For al IL t54ings that he can grow
would har,l, one good meal AFFORD.
And he ratst be content 10 hho"
That virtue is its own rewnru
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
TIL. Count. Baseless Fear.

II hat come" said the count. ito spik
to you, Meestaire Moneybag, about one
what you call heem important mat
taire."
"Ah, yes, count. / understand! Have
q chair. You wish, l presume, to speak
to me about my daughter"
mo, pardon, not Eat. l hat seen re
tax list where he say you hat only
fifty thousan' what you call heem dol
laire."
"Oh-ho. hol That's all right, count.
Don't worry about that. My Office boy.
to whom l had transferred $5,000,0OO
worth of gold bonds, which he held
while the assessment was being fixed,
has Just handed them back. They're
here In the safe now Do you want to
see them?"
"Merci, monsieur! You hat lift what
you call heem q weight from my mind"
Chicago Record Herald.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
Extrayagant Economy.

VoHN JONES he was a thrifty man
And Mrs. Jones was, too
That is to say,
Good Mrs. J.
Was thrifty and would do
Her share In saving. but she thougnt
Her husband was a bit too taut
He kept the purse strings tied around
His fingers In a twist,
And every tim
She got a dime
She had to force his fist.
..Don't spend SO much" he'd always
say.
"We're saving for a rainy day"
John owned a lot of property
In buildings. farms and grain,
With stock galore
And stuff in store,
But never stopped the strain
To gather In all he could get
Against the day that might be wet.
And still his wife could scarcely find
Enough to eat and wear.
Her bonnet had
Grown old and sad,
Her clothes made people stare,
But John stayed in his narrow way
And harped upon 1.-THE rainy day.
Two years went by; John saved ana
saved
Until the wet spring" came,
When floods poured down
On farm and town
And washed away the same.
Including Johns possessions. which
BY now had made him very rich.
John and his wife took to the hills
To save themselves, and he
Began to swear
And rip n tear
At his adversely.
Indeed, 1t was enough to cause
A man to break the ten first laws.
But Mrs. ]. was less disturbed.
And as she shook her head
At Johns distress
And wickedness
In swearing so she said:
Nov, John, don't carry on that way;
You saved 1t for a rainy day
William J. hampton In New York Trip-
une.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
TUST II NEEDrUL-

You can buy a stick of candy
Or a mansion on the square.
You can take a trip to Boston
Or In fact to anywhere.
You may gather smiles and kisses,
You may wen purchase Ice
Or a large and juicy beefsteak
If you only have the price.
You can travel In an auto.
You can ride a blooded steed,
You may eat. although not hungry.
Where the rich and mighty feed;
You may even joke the kaiser
On the way his garments 1T
Or invite the king to luncheon
If the price Is In your mitt.
You can fracture half the statutes
Without being put In jail.
You can get gay with the judges.
You n twist the tigers tail.
You ma get into the senate
On a purchased seat. l hear
Even there through good
You may read your title clear.
Yes, it's tho almighty dollar
That you read so much about
That will lift you by the boot straps
Up or down or I'm or out.
Money makes the mnre skedaddle.
Money makes the world kotow.
And while this Is thus. dear Berthe.
Men will get the stun somehow.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
Succeeded Too Well.

The multimillionaire sits In gloomy
and lonely grandeur in the heart of his
vast forest preserve.
ITS a mistake" he signs. 81 went
too far. Now that have bought up all
the land for forty miles In each dlrec-
ton and have fenced in the property
NOT a soul can come around to see how
am enjoying my money. I'll have to
induce some one to get out a court or
'ier compelling a road to he cut through
.ay property or I'll be as forgotten as
= hermit. Judge.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
Modern Titles.

"Say, Is the big noise INF" inquired
the visitor as he entered the Office.
Nav. He's out feedin'."
"Well. where Is the chief gazabotthe
n who has charge when the big noise
Is out?"
Hes outa town."
Amt there some one here who acts
as the main squeeze when they're
awayY
Nobody but me-"
"And who are your"
I'm de small bunch-de guy what
sweeps out de office. See?"-Milwau-
kee Sentinel.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
N OTIC e!

Notice is hereby given that !
will strictly enforce Sections 1874
to 7S8 inclusive of Cuttings Com
piled Laws, 1900, pertaining to
animals running at large in towns
and cities between the hours of G
p. m. and a. m.
G. w. Human
Constable Argenta Township,
Lander County, New.
Battle Mountain, New,
September 18th, 1905
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
Creatures Of Impulse.

$50 you can't help stealing?" asked
the magistrate kindly.
mo, your honor; an impulse comes
ever me that l can't resist"
Too bad. too bad! An impulse to
send you up for six months is getting
hot; Of me. There! It's got hold. Six
months; can't resist. Impulse is a won
derful thing."-Philadelphia Ledger.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
A LiYeIY TuRsla.

with that old enemy of the race, consti
patton, often ends in appendicitis. To
avoid all serious trouble with stomach,
liver, and bowels, take DR.. Kings New
Life Pills. They perfectly regulate
these organs, without pain or discom-
fort. 25c at A. ID. Lemaire & SONS.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
Natural

Natural.
She giggled In the morning.
She glggled late at eve,
She giggled In the open,
She gisgled up her sleeve.
Her gushing gale OF laughter
Was johnny-on-the-spot
Whenever any comment
A ready answer got.
Between her gushing giggles
Shed litter for n change.
And then again she'd smoker
To give her Joy full range.
And no n ever told her
To go and hire n hall.
For this consummate giggier
Was just a girl. that's all.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
A Different Matter.

"What time does he get down to
work in the mornlng?"
well. he gets down to the Office at
$50, but he doesn't get down to work
until the boss begins strolllng around"
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
Had Private A5viess.

Apgt ~
will marry you.
provided you
Gun get rapa's
consent"
"Come. now,
none Of those
gags on me-
Haven't ] been
talking to your
little sisterf She
just Uniformed me
that the old man
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
Needs Il In His Business.

81 thought he was located"
"IIe is"
"But you say he Is looking for an
opening"
"Sure. Didn't you know he was q
dentist?'
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26

Ida-She hates Jack.
Belle-And why?
Ida-Because when he meets her he
always says. "There is nothing like old
friends getting together" She objects
10 tie "old."-Detroit Tribune.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
Had q Pump.

81 have bcen trying to sell the milk
man n COW"
Hasn't no got onef"
mot yet. He says he must get tho
necessities of life before INDUCING In
the luxuries."
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26

If the doctors bill e always Q bill
Of health 1t wouldn't be SO bad.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26

There's q bit of difference between
having nothing to do and having to do
nothing.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26

Real poetry and real money rarely
exchange courtesles.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
Humor qne Philosophy
PERT PARAGRAPHS.
BY DUNCAN p. SMITH

Boosting Is not an unmixed evil. II
often sounds so fine In the Boosters
own ears that he Is constrained to
make good.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
Couldn't Appreciate Il.

"Great joke on Jones'"
where Is the laugh?'
Went fishing and forgot to take bis
jug along"
Case of dry humor."
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26

Some people think that they are be-
ing dead swell when they buy q nick.
els worth for a dollar.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
They Chic In For Fun.

What. ask the banks to interest," ply
On public funds that come tneir WsS'
A bas such regulationsl
Explain to me the reason. pray
OF their campaign donations.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26

Hard work Is almost as bad ~ hsv-
ing nothing to do.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
Gave Il No Show.

HE shot the crow without warning"
"Yes. Why mott"
she should have heard 1t for its
caws."
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
Blanks to Burn.

Blanks to Burn.
"He was speaking Of tho pisnz~
blank, blankety blank horse race"
"Yes; ! heard him."
"What did be meanr'
ut IL all q blank to me-"
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
lust For PolitenesS

lost For Politeness
els Mr.. johnson IMP
mo, sir"
"But he invited me to call at this
hour"
YES replied the frank once bog.
.Tbat IL the reason he isn't In"
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26

Joy Is as Elusive as the sheen on the
neck Of a pigeon.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26

was going to call time on me u oidns
propose pretty SOON"
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26

Have you been touching the barom-
eter, Jane?"
Eyes, mum; I've just put it to very
dry cos it's my day out tomorrow
Taller.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
Doubtful Honor.

"He Just got out Of jail this :
Ing"
sDoes he feel disgracedr
mo; he claims to be the --latest INNS
nssk"
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
ANXIOUS 70 Know,

II came to ask for the hand OF your
daughter"
What are your ~prospectsT"
THAT Is Just what / came to ind
out"
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26
The AftGclap.

The Afterclsp.
Though stole n
kisses may be
sweet
And ~getting
h Q m much
rasher
Than taking those
before you set,
It's not so pleas
art when you
get
Arrested as q
masbar
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26

1t takes a pair to make a home. Even
three of a kind won't suffice.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26

nbRT5IFT.
Date of first publication July q, 1905.
Higgins u Senior Claimants Law
Attorneys. Salt Lake City, Utah.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1906-04-26

The reason n d~lsinterested opinion 10
hard to ind Is because nobody who II
disinterested cares enough to have an
opinion.
Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1906-08-30
DENATURED ALCOHOL.
Practical ExempIi6cations of It's Uses
at jamestown Exposition.

Practical ExempIiacations of It's Uses
at jamestown Exposition.
Uncle Sam proposes to instruct farm
ers in the uses of denatured alcohol at
the Jamestown exposition next year.
Among government exhibits will be one
showing the development and uses Of
denatured alcohol which will be in
charge Of government officials. There
will also be exhibited various internal
combustion engines adapted to the use
Of alcohol as fuel Special machinery
is being made for utilizing this new
fuel, and it viii be chiefly the object Of
this exhibit to show the public how it
may be applied to heating, cooking and
lighting purposes and also as a fuel
for engines to be used for various farm
purposes. Announcement is made, we
observe, that so economical will this
fuel be that farmers can make their
own supply from the waste products Of
their farms. We do not believe that al
cohoI can be made from various farm
products economically By farmers, but
rather that large plants will have to be
erected at considerable cost where such
farm produce may be utilized. We do
not believe that the farmer should be
led to think that be can erect small
distillery on his farm to make alcohol
successfully and at paying price.