Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-12-01
EVENTS IN NEW YORK
Thoughts on Question, "ShouId
Men Be Chaperoned?"
At THE MERCY OF WOMEN
How Newspaper Humorist Tried to
Prove an Alibi.
HIS WATCH WAS LIFTED
Graft Schemes Worked by Metropoli-
tan Cops-What Press Agents Do
for Foreign Theatrical Stars.
At THE MERCY OF WOMEN
HIS WATCH WAS LIFTED

for Foreign Theatrical Stars.
Special Correspondence Of The Star
NEW YORK. November 80. 1906.
| Roy McCardell, well-known New York
| newspaper humorist, was thinking deeply
| about monkey houses and things as he
wended his way homeward the other even
| ing.
He wasn't pondering funny matters. HUI
| morists only do that when they are work.
| Ing. The minute they quit work they be-
come oppressed and sad. II they have a
| sense OF humor they become even more sad
when they see their stuff in type Some
humorists have a sense of humor.
anyhow, McCardell was In q gloomy and
| resentful frame OF mind when he reached
| the Grand Central station-he lives in New
Rochelle and is therefore a commuter A
| humorist and cemmuter! And yet Gin
cinnatus. who was funny old chap and
a humorist in his own way was a Roman
commuter with an alfalfa penchant, his
ranch having been situated somewhere near
the Appian Nay, or the Campagna or
something OF that sort
McCardell was sore over the way Caruso
nad been treated. He had spent con-
siderable part of the day, while working
at his humorous bench, in thinking and
taking about that Caruso business He
look the ground that the golden throated
tenoro-lyr1co had been made the Patsie.
He held that any man, no matter how de-
mure and sedate and modest and mousse
like his conduct, was liable to get into the
same kind OF O scrape as Caruso in New
York. He didn't believe that Caruso had
been and gone and done it at all. 1t was
all cops job or the woman had dreamed
1t. or the monkey had been the indelioate
and Hbidinous rogue, as Caruso had
claimed.
Men Should Be Chaperoned.
McCardell had told his associates that a
man is in very grave danger on the streets
OF or In any public place in New York if
unchaperoned. Any woman who didn't like
the fold Of fat at the back OF his neck or
who resented the way his ears stood out
or who resented the color of his hair could
frame up any old sort of charge against
whatever man she chose to pick out in New
York and he would be pinched forthwith.
and the charge would stick, and the mod
est and demure and grievously wronged
New York male was disgraced and roo-in-
ed. That's the. way McCardell viewed the
dangerous situation and he didn't like the
looks OF 1t at all, and the peril of it was
keen in his mind as he turned 1t over and
ton.
AS he nudged his way through the dense
crowd OF women he caught himself softly
whistling 1.-THE Yellow SheetsIl Get You IL
You Don't Watch Out"
Finding himself, as he made for the gate
leading to his train, wedged In with the
closely-herded bunch OF women scurrying
for trains, and observing that some of them
appeared to be Viewing him with hateful
glances, Mccardeli suddenly became panic
stricken. al
Surprising one of the women were to emit
sQuawk, then and there, and to turn
upon him and accuse him of having-er-
deliberately brushed fieck of dust or lint
from the collar of her coat, or something
like that-then what?
Why. one of the big station cops would
come a-running over, and he'd be grabbed
by the elbow and wheeled around, and
dragged to the station calaboose, and he'd
miss his train and a whole lot of other
trains for New Rochelle, and 1t would get
which he worked at humorousness, about
how he had been picked up for gross mis-
behavior. and his family up yonder in
Westchester county-why, the whole idea
heavy beads of fear believed the humorist's
forehead. What chance on earth would he
have to square himself If
Right at this stage of his stampede Nc
Cardell had an idea.
Alibi OF the Mitts.
There's one thing" the thought rushed l
through his mind as he labored frantically
to reach his gate; 1T hold my hands
straight UP IN the air from now till board
my tio1Ais WHY tHdt IL lct ulc Uut EVERY
body'n see that I'm holding my hands
straight up. They'll be in plain view. And
II I'm holding my hands straight UP in the
air, would any woman have the nerve to
accuse me? Why. she couldn't! It 'ud be
ridiculous! I'd have an alibi-an alibi of
the mitts. Me for that. I'm going to hold
EN- up F., that's hats what I'm going to do"
two hands straight up into the air. He
held them that way until he got through
the gate and reached his New Rochelle
train. He knew that his curious posture
as he struggled along through the crowd
was attracting attention to himself, but he
couldn't help that. In fact, wasn't he de-
liberately trying to attract attention to HIM
self? Wasn't he deliberately serving notice |
that he didn't purpose to be the victim Of !
any predatory and vindictive female who 1
might pick him out as likely victim for an |
accusation and arrest?. That's what he |
was. So. despite the unusualness OF the |
picture he presented, McCardell just held |
those hands Of his right straight up in the |
dir till he got into his seat in the New
Rochelle train.
When he got into the seat. however his
seat-mate, a New Rochelle friend of the |
humorist's. pointed to McCardel's hanging |
watch chain.
The watch had been neatly removed from
the chain. Alarmed. McCardell went |
through himself to see what had happened. !
What had happened was this:
Mr.. McCardell, while trudging through |
the station mob with his hands up in the |
air, had been neatly frisked by some dip |
with an eye for good things. of his old /
gold watch and his weeks wages as a hui |
morist, the same. in loose currency. having /
been reposing in one of Mr.. McCardelis /
waistceat pockets.
No matter how you arrange things in
your own mind you're just naturally bound |
to overlook a bet or two in New York. |
McCardell thinks and says so, anyhow,
and he certainly is there with the ex-
perience.
The Caruso Incident
Everybody is entitled to just one guess
and guess Is equivalent to an opinion-as
to the guilt or non-guilt of Enrico Caruso
My vote goes for Caruso. 1 know Caruso
personally. He Is a masculine, self-con-
tanned. well-balanced man, even If he be
singing man. Leaving aside every other
bearing upon the case. nobody
well acquainted with Caruso can conceive