The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-03-09
HUMOR or TIE DAY

II II U@ADAE VI 444L III r
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Young Doctor-ae seems to have every
confidence in my ability to save him.
Old Doctor-Is he delirious on other sub
5ects, also fudge.
Young Wicklow do you Ike my cook
lngE Don you think I've begun well2
that well begun is half done.-Punch.
Footpad-No back TAXI gotter have
Isaaestein-You shant Come aroundt
70 my pawnshop undt viii lend you feet
ty eendts on dot revolver!-Puck
Have you ever lost your faith IN hu-
mainly % asked the philosopher
Never In their gullibility," said the
grafter, but unfortunately they've lost
their faith in me!''-Detroit Free Press.
Now. Tommy" said the fond parent,
who was it that discovered the hand
writing on the WALTZ
The teacheri'' promptly replied Tom
my an said I did It with nly new pen
ell an kept me in.'-Chicago News.
why is it that some Of the bright boys
who know everything the teacher asks do
not turn out to be great business men a.
Perhaps answered Mr.. Dustin Stax
ITS because they get into the habit OF
What do you think? Young softed.
who is laughing stock among the girls
he pIeases.''
That's right
- You don don't believe such egregious van
ny as that do you!
please any 1Baitimope American 1Ss es o0s7n
yes his. delieaey Of touch Is quite
"Ah pianist?"
NO, society journalist" Cleveland
Plain Dealer
"a t,,o.4 >. -, -,
man dat gives pious thanks fob de dahk
night dat IaVors his plan fob iiftin' chick
ems w Washington Star.
'I understand the author Of that popu-
lar song got only $500 for writing It
fence. Did he pay the fneq.'-PhIiadei-
phia Ledger.
Mrs Nexdore-I bought a new piece OF
music for my daughter to play and I
guess she'll master it soon. She was try
Miss Pepprey- Indeed. she was; very.-
Philadelphia Press.
have all the attention she wants, can't
yes. There's only one that can beat
awhos that7"
"A homely girl with the coln."-Detroit
Well; Planger has completely lost his
/
TITS q good thing" said his friend. ut
/ was the most objectionable thing about
him Detroit Free Press
Mrs. Knicker-Is your husband an after
+ dinner speaker?
Mrs Boeker--No, but he does a powerful
i Lite. Of sFumblins during it--BF00kisR
in literature, didn't she7 W. "7''
! Grlggs-Yes, Indeed. I understand that
novel to get herself an education-Iife.
citiman-Do they. keep a servant girl7
! Subbubs-Oh! certainly not. But as soon
as one leaves they engage another.-Phii-
adelphia Press.
Jane. leaning forward: WIN you please
remove your haiti hides half of the
The woman in front with much bitter
ness: No. WON'T
j: Jane, louder: Excuse me. I suppose if
It, Cleveland Plain Dealer.
You never bought gold brick. did
your asked the admiring friend
Not exactly" answered Mr. Cunrox;
but once came mighty near having a
French count for a son-in-Iaw- wash
inston Star
Poor old Uncle Richley." said the IA
vorite nephew. hes a very sick man
Yes, replied DR.. Slocum, but I have
his case IN hand now ana there is hope
absent mindedly. some OF our patients
have been known to get well in spite OF
| you. philadelphia Press.
Weary Wanderer-I see they're goin' in
fer free alcohol fer tn arts an sciences
L.impy Lucas-That settles 1t. I'm goin'
to be an artist.-Cleveland Plain Dealer
Drowning Lady-Throw me a life belt.
quick
Polite C1erk-Certainly, madam. What
IS your waist measure, please? ''-Cleve-
| land Leader.