Danville intelligencer. [volume] (Danville, Pa.) 1859-1907, 1906-09-28
Brief News Items.

the Acknowledged OffI-
cial Organ of r1ontour
County.
The drowning season seems to have
passed.
The beginning of autumn is not al
ways marked by cooler weather.
The average politician is necessarily
genial and gentlemanly person.
The law seldom interferes with the
citizen who respects and obeys it.
The only way some people can get
along well together is to stay apart.
Trespass notices for sale at this
office. Two for SC, or 25c dozen.
A woman seldom stops to think
when she is talking, because she never
thinks to stop.
Gar Nicholas says he wants the
good will of his soldiers. That's about
all he has left.
A jury is a body of 12 men selected
= to decide which of the contestants has
the best lawyer.
The difference between saloon and
and cafe is that a jag costs more in
one than in the other.
A fence lasts three years, dog
lasts three fences, horse three dogs
and man three horses.
The slump in New York stocks,
cannot have been so bad, after all.
Only one broker shot himself.
"What is Japan doing?" asks an
exchange. Whatever it is, Japan is
doing it and not talking about it.
Grover Cleveland does not think
much of the average newspaper. He,
no doubt patronizes clipping bureau.
What is nicer than neat engraved
calling card This Office can furnish
you the best. Call and see samples.
The annual convention of the state
Sabbath school workers will be held
at Gettysburg, October 10, IL and
12.
Uncle Sam may be pardoned for
proudly feeling his muscle after the
victories athletes have won in Athens
and London.
Chas. Shires, Esq, of Strawberry
Ridge, while attending court in this
city on Monday, gave us Il pleasant
business call.
Mr.. and Mrs. Irwin Noll, of Lewis
burg, spent Saturday and Sunday
visiting in this city, guests of D.. A.
Lutz and family.
We do not need money ourselves,
but the fellow we owe wants us to
pay. Pay your subscription and help
the other fellow out.
1t is estimated that the naval re-
view off Oyster Bay last month, cost
nearly half million. But even this
is cheaper than a real war.
The New York 400" crowd
handles marriage on the department
store plan: If you don't like your
"purchase, you can exchange it.
See?
More than one man who married
that his wife might be the sunshine
of his home finds her like the present
day sunshine. She makes it hot for
him.
Too many young people depend on
their fathers money taking them
through this world, and their mother S
prayers making everything right fol
the next.
The Eastern newspaper that so con
fidently declares that Senator Platt is
the "last of the bosses" must have
Senator Penrose classed with the sec
tion hands.
Those faces on the capitol doors al
Harrisburg should be of brass. Their
they would be so much nearer the
types of Pennsylvanians are supposed
to represent.
And when you recollect that they
had 1000 saloons in San Francisco,
before the earthquake, you can i'm
agne the suffering caused by the long
dry spell since then.
The man who gets mad at what tht
newspaper says about him should re
turn thanks three times day fol-
what the newspaper knew about hin
and suppressed.
Walking is now being prescribed
for women who desire complexion
but the majority of them will conten
themselves with walking as far as th
drug store for it.
This promises to be another one o
those campaigns where the working
man talks real plaintively about tn
wrongs of labor and then winds up b,
voting the same old ticket.
How soon will some wise legislato
introduce an amendment to the schoo
laws increasing the number of schoo
directors from six to seven, and thu
avoid these exasperating deadlocks ?
Mr.. Rockefeller's declaration tina
he would give 100000, 900 for
growth of hair, simply brings bac
the old and profound truth that ther
are some things that money canne
buy.
Report all items of interest to tn
office. They will be appreciated, an
each item will help to make the papt
that much more interesting. Not a
the news can be secured but by you
help the hons share can be gathered
and that is what is wanted. All tt
news that news will be printed.