Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-06-10
ANSWERS TO
CORRESPONDENTS

| lin this column win be answered all questions
| OF proper nature submitted to The Star. In
quirefs should write one side OF the paper only
and address their letters to Uncle Jasper. star
Office In case OF difacult conundrums answers may
be delayed for week tho. Consequently 1t
may be advisable for all questioners to watch this
column carefuly.I
BILLY BRYAN-one OF my neighbors has
an immense St. Bernard dog that ioafs
around my front yard What shall / do II
it goes mad? A Be cautious. William.
| Shoot the animal through the screen door.
This is vital spot
NOTE-We do not care to give the name
of the author of the following bit OF verse.
We viii say, however. that It Is of the
brightest and cleverest little things that we
have read In a long time. And II didn't
take us long to write 1t. either. Listg
I'm little can of potted ham,
Tho ! ne'er was on the hog.
Just the usual dainty mixture
OF rope and bone and dog.
or all the little odds and ends
Left lying round the place.
Open me. thou hungry one.
And put me In thy face.
CURRENT-Dear Uncle Jasper. please tell
mt uShiittty Nffeh tpnSFeSs VIII dhJoufD.
Ave couldn't have answered that last
week. but lately things have come to a
head Congress. according to the best In
formation obtainable. will adjourn some
time in July or August. although it is only
fair to say that there those who favor
September and October We can say def
initeiy. however knowing. as we do. the In
side sentiment, that adjournment will take
place before September 80.
G. L. K-No, we would not like to mako
such a sweeping statement. Every man
with a turned-up nose hasn't been through
Packingtown Some cases are Celtic and
others congenital.
ETHEL-what is the latest tad in jew
elry? A golden clothespin worn on
tho nose is quite the most recent thing.
The fad originated in Chicago.
NOTE-All of us humorists seem TO be
busy this week bouncing up and down on
a large corpulent trust. Mark Twain for
| wards the following copyrighted product
| for our consideration;
What" murmured the beef chopper as
| It YEARLY macerated a Turkish rug. were
the two most important OF extinct Ameri-
"The buffalo and the hog" replied the
| sausage suffer. busily continuing 10
| jacket packing house miscellaneous,
Mark seems to be up to his usual form.
GERALDINE-Please tell me something
| tina. will iven up the hair. Aver try
rat grille?
WHITE RIBBONER-I heard the other
day of a man who was on a perpetual jag
fof thirty-fve years. Didn't he hold the
record? A.-Not by long shot John
Paul Jones has been preserved: in alcohol
for more than century. But then John
Pau! always did have things come his way.
INDIGNATION-Is 1t -trus-as- charged
that DR.. White of st. Elizabeth personally
uses three automobiles, four horses and
| two buggies? A.-Not at the same time.
| Indig, not at the same time. Even the
superintendent of an insane asylum has
his limitations.
DIETICIAN-AlI this talk about certain
mixtures of food being dangerous makes me
tired. L knew a man once who got away
with broiled lobster. a plate OF crab salad.
quart of Ice cream. three glasses of lem
onade and a strawberry pie at one meal.
| Ave knew the man you speak Of. He Is
now stopping at Gienwood.
. HORRIFIED--Do not the Chicago pack
ing houses follow any scriptural Injunction
at all? A.-Oh. dear yes; they take In tho
lame and the halt and the blind..sSSuch a
philanshropism! Such an inspectionings!
ANXIOUS-I was scared half to. death
the other night by terrible noise. What
was It? A.-Dont be alarmed. You VIII
near IL very frequently from now On iUdA
was the Cannon boom.
High, diddle, diddle.
The cat and the fiddle,
The cow jumped over the moon.
''Ill be careful" she roared,
AS she gracefully scared.
ITO keep out of Chicago this June"
AUGUSTUS-How frequently should one
battle during the heated term2 Am
order to comply with the sanitary regula-
tons the human frame should be swabbed
down at least once month. We have
heard. however, of people who battle much
oftener We have an intimate personal
friend who during the dog days sleeps with
his feet In the bath tub and his head under
the kitchen faucet. Every. one to his
choice
WILLIAM-Where may yellow shoes be
worn? A.-Only on the feet, Bill. Such
pinheadednessi
MARTHA-Please give me a recipe for
potted ham. A.-With pleasure. dearie.
Take pound and half of ground bone,
cupful of oak sawdust, a tablespoonful of
best glue, fine-chopped sock. two
ounces of minced leather and a piece OF
beef the size of walnut. Mix and favor
by leaving near hambone for twenty
four hours. This Is prepared according to
a standard recipe and the result is simply