davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1906-09-05

80 anxious to get into the city to edu-
cate his daughter that he will make
most any sacrifice. Now listen to me.
start in the dairy business with
thirty cows. The milk can be estimat-
ed at 500 quarts per day. If sold at 5
cents quart to the creamery there is
S15 a day, Or s105 per week. All we
lave to do is to deliver the milk and
take check. I shall sell only half the
milk, however. The remainder will be
made into butter. shall put it up ia
fancy cakes and call it 'Bowser's Best
The sales will amount to about $S per
day, and on the sour milk and whey /
Shall fatten about fifty hogs during the
year. When these are marketed the
total income per week for the year will
be about S125. We will call it $1,000
per year. We live we'll, have the bene-
fit Of the country air and make $1,000
per year, and if you have got any fault
to find with that you must be hard to
please. Such bargain as this man is
willing to give me can't be picked up
once in hundred years. What do you
think Of it"
ssYou start with thirty cows?"
aueried Mrs. Bowser.
From thirty to thirty-fye."
'They are on the farm and part of
the bargain. are they"
"Why, no. I must buy them
"Oh, see. Has the farm barn for
cows%
I'll don't think so, but can build
one"
Mrs. Bowser Makes Estimates.
"Of course. Let us see. Thirty good
cows will cost you $1,000. To build
dairy barn will cost you at least $500
more. There is $1,000 to start with.
Had you figured on that?'
Mr.. Bowser swallowed away at his
Adams apple and began to turn pale.
sTo run a dairy Of thirty COWS you
will have TO have two men. They must
milk, feed, drive the milk to the cream
cry, etc. You can figure on $50 per
month as wages, and, Of course, you
must board them. You must add $500
to the $1,000 in the first years ex-
penses. Has the farm got at least
thirty acres of good grass land?''
I'll didn't ask about that, but Of
course it has,"
"Well. if it has you are all right for
the summer. What about the winter?
Those cows must be fed from Novem-
ber to May. Each one will consume
from two to three tons Of hay. What
about sixty or seventy tons of hay and
the soft feed in addition"
woman, what are you trying to get
at?" shouted Mr.. Bowser, as he pound
ed on the table with his fist.
"The actual state Of affairs" she re-
piled. "There will be at least one
month out Of twelve when half yeu:
cows will be farrow or nursing their
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1906-09-05
Sun Worshtpers.

One Of the best friends the tailor has
IS spell of warm, bright sunshine. 1t
shows up the shabby portions Of dress
and reveals it's faded parts in unmis-
taxable fashion. with the result that
the wearers soon find their way to the
tailor and order fresh supply of up to
date styles.-London Tailor and Cutter.
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1906-09-05
Miraculous Multiplication.

A lady who recently bought dinner
service consisting Of fifty-four pieces
for Fl IS. was informed by her house
maid the next day that the bargain
had become still more wonderful, for
it now consisted Of 1925 pieces. -
PHnch
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1906-09-05
nfxaopointfR.

Mrs. Justlooking - Have you any
hand embroidered waists? Salesman
(who has waited on her before)-lm
very sorry to disappoint you. madam
but we have.-Chicago News.
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1906-09-05
Might Have Been Worse.

Newed-Our cook skipped out last
night and too!: all our silver spoons.
Singleton-That's bad.
Newed-Well. it might have been
worse. She also took my wife's COOK
book.-Houston Post
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1906-09-05
One Advantage,

City Man (carpingly)-Whew, but itS
hot! I am told that the mercury fire.
ouently stands at 10 in the shade here.
Farmer Summerboard (cheeringiy)-
Well. you don't halter stay in the
shade, We know-Puck.
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1906-09-05
Poor NIcmOrY.

Aunt Ito a frienG)-Yes, you can be-
lieve ne. was once pretty and
much sought after girl. wasn't l. Max:
Relative (much perplexed)-1-1 can't
rightly remember just now, Amelia
wiener " IIZDlatI.
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1906-09-05
# the Baby is Cutting Teeth

Be sure and use that old and well tried
remedy, Mrs. Winslow's Soothing
Syrup, for children teething. Itsooth-
es the child, softens the gums, allays
all pain, cures wind collie and is the
best remedy for diarrhoea. Twenty
five cents a bottle.
If It is the best of all.
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1906-09-05
A HEALTHY Old AGE
OFTENTHE BEsTPARTOFLIFE
Help for Women Passing Through
Change of Life

Providence has allotted us each at
least seventy years in which to fulfill
our mission in life, and it is generally
our own fault if we die prematurely.
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1906-09-05

We have very good bargains in all departments and
will be pleased to have Lexington friends cell and be-
shown through our stock
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1906-09-05
DRESS GOODS and SILKS.

We are receiving new goods in this de-
paTtn,art daily
50-inch Mol,air, ali co]orS. ........ 4Sc.
36-i5lch Briilantine blue and black. 25c.
27-inch China Silk, all colors .. 4Sc.
1S-inch White Jap Silk k........... 25c.
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1906-09-05
Funny Sayings. by
Bright Little Tots

q UNDAY Scho>! Teacher-What
did the wicked lIe;l GO after cast
- ing Daniel into the fiery furnace?
Bright Boy-They asked if it was
hot enough for him.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1906-08-09

This lunatic asylum story comes
from Glasgow: Two councillors OF that
city were taken over large asylum
the other day by one Of the patients,
a safe man. He had led them to a
room to display view from win
dow, when some one shut the door.
with its self acting lock, and the three
men were prisoners. The patient alone
preserved his composurc. While the
councillors clamored to be released be
remarked;
sTf ! were you ! would be quiet"
No help coming, the councillors grew
desperate. Beads OF perspiration stood
On their brows, and they fairly yelled.
"If ! were you" repeated the patient
soothIngly. Il would keep quiet"
"Bm we're no daft" pleaded one OF
the visitors.
"Hoots mon, that's what I said ma
ser when was brocht In"
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1906-08-09
psr.ntaxe of a Famous Joke.

Two attempts have been made by
contemporary to trace to Its source q
well known law courts joke. The first
credited Sir Frank Lockwood with the
lest. the second made the then MI.
Henry Hawkins Its father, As a fact.
the mot seems to have originated win
the first Lord Chelmsford, then Freder-
lex Thesger. Sir Cresswell cressweil
was irving a case In which the name OF
n vessel was frequently Introduced.
When mentioned by Sergeant Channel.
who was deficient In store OF aspirates.
the vessel was the Ellen; when alluded
10 by Thesiger she was the Helen.
"Stopr" cried Cresswell presently. u
have got on my notes the Ellen and the
Helen. Which is III" In his blandest
tone Theslger replied. "Oh, my lud. the
vessel was ehristened the Helen. but
she lost her Ii in the chops Of the chan
mel" The joke will be remembered
against the victim long after other rec
ords Of him are forgotten, which
makes II worth while to note that the
only education he ever received was
at a poor private school. but that ne
raised himself to the bench by indus
try which would be the death OF mos'
men.-St. James Gazette.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1906-08-09
s.a. w.~.. s.S Fac.

Tee, has always been considered me
peculiar attribute of woman with
woulat,'s tact" Ia one Of the stock
phrases Of the novelist But writer
In one OF the American magazines
aud his view Il upheld ~ en English
magazine which quotes hm~-upseis
this tradition by declaring that men
are more often tactfuI than women
Men. u Is submitted. are swift TO
know when to speak and when not 70
speas-when II is wise to withhold
even a iook--and that is why a u's-i'-
ocre man win succeed when even q
clever woman viii fall, why men are
greater in diplomacy. in all things that
require Gnssse. sull u j. question
wlscgher men really succeed l'ei'rf ~
diplomacy. What about tie WOMAN
ves y shs .pswss bsAisd uss mroosr
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1906-08-09

Here Is sea serpent story from ono
NJ the great fresh water lakes OF cen.
tral Africa. The Globe Trotter OF Nal
robi British East Africa, tells 1t: "Ac-
cordlng 10 natives on the shore ana
Islands OF Lake Victoria the real simon
pure water python Is reality Omcers
on board the slbyl and the winifred
have time and ngain been unable 70
account for tie unrest shown at umsS
in the most tranquil wates. Dir cie-
ment Hill in crossing the lake some
wears ago In a launch with one Mac
rreror the engineer. saw this monster
and described It as having a head re-
eembling the hlppopotamus. only three
times broader, but much more nat and
wedge shaped. The opinion OF the ma
tivcs regarding it, length, etc, differs
very much, but all agree that the rep
Tile is amphIbious and declare they
have seen forty feet or more lying DOR.
mant on the bank, while ths supposed
tail. sixty or seventy fest from shofsv
created 4 commotien In the water -
ssnbl.ns The vash ee n ecsss
steamer"
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1906-08-09
CALL FOR PAVED RoAowAys.


Landowner WILING - Fsv -
Acre Fer The Inprsvs.sst.
IT would tax myself 81 an acre u my
peishbors would join mo for the pur-
pose Of paving the road with brick"
said william jackson, farmer living
on Spring Hill road In Chilncothe. MO.
His sugecstion was taken up. ana hs
found others even more liberal than
himself, says the st. Louis Post-us-
patch. Among these \ J. T. Jackson,
who lives on Trenton road. When
Jackson heard Of the plan hs said un-
hesitatingly:
"why. / would give ~ per acre y
pave Trenton road, aud believe tnere
are others who would do the same. !
know one other farmer on the ROAD
who would do It. The money collected
this way would be enough to pave tho
road with brick and ebert rock. %
course ebert rock In cheaper. Ine rohd
need not be wider than sixteen ana o
half feet, and II could be put up Tor
81. 900 Z mile, I think"
Jackson IL actively trying TO get the
opinions OF his neighbor, and he thinks
with them he viii start TO raise fnno
for paving the road.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1906-08-09

mers, but injured orchards and fields
for considerable distance on each
side Of the road.
The result Of oling the roads as soon
as the authorities got the right method
was more thnn to lay the dust. II was
found that not only was the road DUST
less but that the oil became incorpo-
rated with the surface and made a
good binding crust from one to three
inches deep.
The roads stood wear and water well.
and after number OF severe rain
storms that cut the unoiled macadam
roads to pieces the oiled roads were
found In us good condition as ever.
The practice in California extended till
now there are about 76O miles Of roads
and streets that have been oiled for
from one year upward.
The department Of agriculture recent
" received a preliminary report ON
some experimental stretches Of nm OIL
I'd and tarred road in Jackson, Tenn.
months, but tfle results 10 far nave
been very satisfactory. The section
treated with tar formed an almost as
phalt.like surface that has stood the
wear well 40 far, has been WATERPROOF
and is said TO be pleasant to drive over
and easy on the horses hoofs.
The oiled road In that section has
been almost equally satisfactory. The
same sort Of experiments have been
tried to limited extent In Texas.
Pennsylvania. New Jersey and other
states, and the reports have been uni
formIy favorable where the work has
,een properly done. The road has
to be cleaned and narrowed and well
rolled, and It Is best to apply the tar
or oil in hot, dry weather. The road
has to be protected from trafic for
from ten hours to two days till the
dressing has had time to vet and slnh
In. After that II Is said to be almost
MS satisfactory ms paved street.
The oil that will be used In the Wash
ington work Is n rather heavy oil, with
an asphaltum base. The tar Is the
same as is used In ordinary paving
The tar OF course has to be applied hot
but the oil can be put on cold. Ons
side OF the road ia treated at tint
and then roped OF for protection III
the surface has set
California Is decidedly enthusiastic
over the success OF her oiling work
which has there passed beyond the ex
perimental stage. Washington WI
| have the benefit OF her experience. too
as there were some mistakes made y
the earlier stages Of the work. and th'
oil made nasty mud that injured
clothes and everything else Il touched
It has been found now thnt this troubl
does not exist II the road II not uses
too soon, and even the damage that
was feared might result to automobil
tires has proved myth. In fact, II
said that the tires show a longer III
on the oiled roads than they do wher
the rubber is exposed 70 the sharp cut
ting grit OF the old macadan surface.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1906-08-09
now DOCTORS CAN HELP.


e98~4 Ao004<
IN nm article r~wnssy tn ths Auto
Advocate. pr. II. II. ~ John o. Edna,
Mo. scd bow Physicians might hsip
secure 1cod roads ~ follows.
"if any onr man cn tho face of this
earth knows how 10 appreciate 1 good
road IL " the physician. Ex~pt V
might b. fireman on the call ef duty
In the suburb. of so,ne town Or city
none eau appreciate better than he cr
she who has q life 20 save the tnes.
ilmable advantage u gced road. par
tlcuiaily when compelled to drive over
II at night What then can the physi-
clan do to sssist In tho promotion
thcreofY
There are At least thrvc practical
ways or suggestions oferinx them
selves vin one IA the esiucaiion of tho
people. the showing to tho practical ev-
eryday tnspaying farmer that good
roads are good Investments aud pay
over NO per cent ON the net cost.
Educate them. show them the aw.
fui waste. the actual loss Of money ev-
cry tlme they haul q load or empty
wagon over = poor road. tho wear aud
tear ON their buggies. wagons or carts:
show them that the cost of building .
good road II but little greater than that
OF keeping up a little dirt IN the cen
ter aud that Nad once well built IL
easy 10 repair and Ia good road for
many years What roads have ever
superseded those In Great Britain.
many OF which are In existence yet
but all Of which owe their firmncss,
solidIty and durability to-day to tho old
foundations built by the Romano cen.
turtles ago whom Britain was nothing
but dense forests. plains and ever
gladcsf
who, then. better than the physi.
clan, who has tho entrec Into our
homes and Ia imbued with all tho Free
dom aud privilege Of an exclusive
member Of every family he visits. who
has better right or IL better capable
OF doing a right loyal part In the hght
Tor good roadsf lie IL revered. 70.
spected. looked up to. and his views
are accepted with degrce OF positive
ness and assurance bred In tho minds
Of his hearers by his calling and his
higher education.
"secondly, LET every physician who
owns or controls a section OF roadway
along his property set the example Of
building and maintaining a good road.
Then his teaching will have effect
among his hearers, his efforts In try.
ing to establish county and state good
road funds, uniformity Of road build
ing. etc, will havo weight and effect.
Thirdly. let physicians m class. .
special class. exprcss their willingness
10 sumbit In the cause Of humanity 70
Z special nominal tax per annum to .
state FUND apart from whatever other
ordinary taxes they In common with
others have to meet said tax to b
known and recognized a. tho ply.
sicians' own good road subscription.
and II will become before long such .
source OF pride and glorincntion Of ply
sicians AZ a class that not only win Il
react an a special lever to their tcach-
Ing qualities, but other professions ana
classes, like sheep following a leader.
from sense or priue ~ sru wnv Inn
furnish the largest pro rata per an
mum In the state. Then win come the
golden days Of good roads In earnest"
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1906-08-09
OIL AND TAR ON ROAD
SxpGRiMsNrs 70 eE MADE ON
WASHINGTON slGsswAvs.
ss.sat.s. n~vvsws.s ssa rA~seusA
Reiras vrs.s R~a~tse~s~ss - Net,
mr., weather Nest Tt~~ ~ Apsiy
Tar s.a oss--sssea Nssslss - 0ttt~s.

nry Weather Meat Jtasc ~ ApRW
Tar ssa otl--ssseA Nss~lss ~ 0ttt~s.
The war department and the depart.
lsent ~ agriculture ARE 10 experiment
with Oh and tar on section of Wash
lngton roads. The work will be under
The direction Of the road Once cf the
department OF aericultuw. and the
war department WIN furnish the roads,
snys the Washington Star. Both oil
and tar win be tried, and probably =
mile Of each will be treated The
stretch used win be either the dusty
stretch cf Seventeenth street below the
war department or part OF the Poto-
mac boulevard or both.
The use Of on In road work IL new In
Washington. no that the experiments
win be watched with some interest
But there are other sections where the
use OF oiled roads has been kept up for
years, and the practice has spread over
most Of California. where the people
are quite enthusiastic over the rcsul's
In the past eight or nine years The
work was commenced IN 1878 In Cali
fornin. where petroleum IN cheap. and
was tried at first In limited way on a
stretch OF about six miles simply 10 lay
the dust, which was not only a great
nuisance In the long. rainlcss sum.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1906-08-09


The steam schooner, vessel whose
build and habits are peculiar to the
Pacific, often goes 10 sea with her
load line over her hatch" which means
that after her hold has been crammed
with cargo O deckload OF lumber IL
piled halfway up the masts, 20 that
her skipper puts out with the water
washing green over his main deck and
an occasional comber frisklng across
bis battened ha tches, Along the har-
Dor front Of Seattle runs the story at
4 passenger who loped down 70 tns
wharf IN q bury 10 got aboard = ds.
per.in. ysesfn schooner. lie balanced
eimsslf oa the strinyplsce for an IN
r,sn. lootai down AZ what little he
corld yee Of tie laden rraft and hoye
hIs glpsack down the only opening 10
sight, He was about 10 dive after !
whcn d loungcr on the wharf shouted
al. there Where do you think
You're jumpln' iof That's the smoke
stack You tossed your baggage down
sTsa,sr gssped the passenger. y
thought II was the hatch = ouiina
Magazine.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1906-08-09

Al recent Kansas good roads con
ycption the county good roads com
mittec made the following recon-
mendation 10 the convention That
each township give l25 In prizes for
the fiye best half mile stretches Of road
made IN the township BY the use OF ths
King drag and that the city Of Law
renee give prize for ths bsst stretcn
OF road on the nine rural routes run
ming out from IAwrsnee. tho mail car
rcrs to b. the Judges.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1906-08-09


lrcnthlesu. -ired met Mr Rot~rts ~
iunrl, snd he told Pred hs wns Ia an
awful m. Hts sisnographer had b~en
taken very III and bad gone home. ana
be asked Fred il no knew good rIrI
who could substitute until sbs was
we,i. Pred todd him weuld belp him
out. nna lis SIS week" she tinasbrd
exritediy.
Her mother sighed. but there was
contradictory twinkle In her eye~ ITS
too had you haven't KEEP, up your
speed or course you won't be shle to
take the position" ssid her mother,
aNoa'l II gnoE wili' lie wants
nae right away. It's the Mr.. Roberts,
said Marge lueidiy,
Mrs. Dickson SMILED. And you can
go 10 the country now. dearie," she
suggested,
"yes, IL his stenographcr only stays
III long enough poor girl" she amend
ed. feeling that her remark was more
human than humane.
For month MIR Roberts stenozra'
pher lay III. When she came back.
late In May. Mar2e packed her trunk
and went into the country to write
her masterpiece"
Her letters home were frequent. In
one she wrote;
THE country 10 glorious ut this time
OF year. 1t grows lovelier each day.
This morning as sat beneath y nne
old maple tree awaiting inspiration ]
was startled by familiar voice, and
who do you think II VAST Mr.. Rob.
erts, He said he was city tired and
wanted Whit Of pure country air.
He doesn't know how long he'll stay.
He says II all depends. ! find him very
coneenlal, although he laughs at the
idea OF women wanting u career. . .
intended working this afternoon, but
he has asked me TO take a walk, 80
shall have TO postpone work until to-
morrow"
Her letters glowed with accounts Of
pleasure trips taken with Mr.. Rob
erts." but only In the first was there
any mention Of work.
Mrs. Dickson remarked this to her
\ son.
Don't worry, mother" he said know
lngly. ",rhe kid'll come around all
right. She's the writing bee In her
bonnet, and she's stung some, too. but
sting isn't fatal, and the treatment
she's taking now will effect perma-
nent cure
| His mother sighed.
"she was such good stenographer,
she said ruefully.
Two weeks later Marge came home,
rosy and bright, with new happy
light in her eyes.
"The vacation has done you good,
dear" said her mother u have never
seen you looking better or happier
she added refectively.
"Did you do any writing, dearT
"Yes. read us what you've written.
sis" said Fred.
"I-I-that is-well, 1t isn't-in shape
yet to be read" replied Margc nery.
ously.
Fred winked at his mother.
"But can't you give us some idaa OF
itY' he persisted teasingly.
In the evening the "city tired Rob
door. His first words were, "Hnve
you told them. dearT
Marge hesitated.
"Oh. Billy, | couldn't" she SAID q!
last 81 tried to, but Fred was horrid
and teased me about my masterpiece
and mother thought had been work
Ing all the time was away, ana
couldn't tell them then. You DO II
Billy" she said imploringly.
Aud Billy did.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1906-08-09

Why does the sun burns Why does
mosquito siing' Why do VIZ feei an.
happy in the good old summer timef
Answer. We don't. We use DsWitl's
Witch Hazel Salys, and tiese little ills
don't bother us. Learn " hook for the
name oD tha hox 10 gct the genuine.
l1,ld by A. ". retlsbcns.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1906-08-09

A word n ,fath hi few Words "sear.
" al ether cough cures arc constr
paiine, especially those containing OPP
iaies. Kennsdy's Laxative Honey and
Tar moves the bowels Contains no
opiates." You can get il u A. IL.
priiibone.
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1906-08-09
wsss 70 Dsas.

"
When the smiles Of spring appsaS
Drag tho road.
when ths summer tims n here f.'
Drag this road:
When the corn 10 In the say.
In the winter cold and drsaS.
Every season In ths ysAS.
Drag the road.
when you've nothing siss 70 -
Drag the ROAD.
II but for an hour or two.
DRAG tbs road; f
Il viii kssp them good - nsvs
with Z purposs 6vm asA trsA
vAii N iiss; ne ~ y yssi ~ 4
DRAG ~ SeAA. ~ '
wsusa ysu ss ~ pssUss shAase
pras ~ peoAi \
~ ~ eysesm - ~ venA "a
OsAg tho vea1, M
oavs sAs tsag 3 hve,y gvl1l.
7eas ths laurel wreath v KSn0.
JeAM Ell xvsyytoAy slns
Drag ne road.
-.Nssionai sseckusa and tasmse
The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1906-08-09
A Tuue o. . joke.

WAS that d bonaiide piece that
Ethellnda was piaylngT asked Mr.
Cumrox.
@certalniy," answered bis wife. That
was selection IRON Wagner"
swelI. of course wouldn't express
any doubts 10 company. but half The
time can't tell whether Libellsfa IL
playing tune Or practical loka
Washington Star.