The Washington herald., 1906-12-23
ASH man BREAKS into VERSE
Eleetrifes Meek Residents with
Gladstone Yuletide Song.
He stops at EverybOdy's House ON n
His own Sake.

If there has been any doubt that Christ
mas is at hand it is dispelled COMMITS
sioner Macfarland's corps of invisible
knights of the garbage cart and the ash
wagon have aroused themselves from their
year of somnambulism and have showed
up at last in all the glory of holiday attire.
But they are not abroad for the purpose
of collecting trash. They evidently intend
to break no precedents. They have. on
the contrary, gone into literature as side
line, and have burst forth into lyrics that
would make a verse in one Of George
AIDES comic operas look like quotation
from Paradise Lost"
Householders who haven't heard the loot
Of seavenger's horn since the robins
ceased twittering in the White House
grounds. and who had come 10 the concIu-
sion that the backyard cleaners brigade
had been put out OF business by the
statute of limitations, received rude
shock yesterday. The streets of Wash
ington fairly teemed with garbage carts.
and a body couldn't stir out OF doors
without danger of being run over by an
ash man. Letters Of congratulation and
laudatory telephone messages began 10
pour. like Santa Claus gifts, into the Dis
tricJ building. and the Commissioners be
came pulled with pride. II was not until
later that there came the realization that
some mute, inglorious Milton mad come 10
life endowed with the silvery harp OF
Orpheus; that the poet Of the garbage
barrel had sprung into fame with one ar
tistic. brief, pathetic MARBLE Of Yuletide
Tho Irr-uEfz- rgIorpI sspar7rr7ef4 % who
ratified through the streets last month.
and the month before. blowing their
horns, but never disdaining TO stop for the
collection of that commodity which fer
tilizes the SOIL and the back-porch ac-
cumulauOn which has caused angry citi-
zens to think of electing Delegates 10 Con-
gress. We're yesterday more polite than
Chesterfield. more suave and courteous.
more self-sacrifcing than Raleigh.
The same collector" who never be-
fore collected a pint Of ashes without
holding up the luckless hOusekeeper for
10 cents or an old coat. and who wore a
face like Vesuvius about ten seconds be
fore an eruption. yesterday came clothed
in smiles like wreaths Of misJletoe. Gar
bage carts. which are wont to dash
through stricken thoToughfares like an
auto car escaping from q cop. ambled
their benign way along, and drew up
with precision before doors which neer
/ had known them before A polite col
I lector" with a shiny black face and a
smile like an angel ambled up TO the
front door and stood with cap in hand
Just how many cases Of apOplexy or
narrow escapes from sudden death there
were in Washington yesterday may never
be known. The very sight of a gar
/ bage collector was so strange to many
that Christmas stimulants. carefully
/ boarded for the merry days of next week.
We're hastily requisitioned. But there
need have been no fear. These dapper
collectors were not about TO break
/ any records. Nobody with a mountainous
ash pile OF overlooking swill pail need
I have feared to lose them. The col
/ lectors were merely paying their an
nual ante-Christmas call. They presented
I cards to all Washington inscribed in the
following happy vein:
OUR CHRISTMAS GREETING
Times are hard and Christmas Is near:
The Poor Slop Man is around an the year,
Money IS scarce and Turkeys are fat.
So please drop something in the
Carriage Mans Hat.
Having held up the stricken housekeep-
/ ers with naughty outstretched palm, the
4 banditt disappeared Il is presumed that
1 the people of washington viii set an
/ other call from the garbage men" next
year