The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1906-03-17
Town TALK
By The Man About Town.

Last week teacher in one of the
local schools gave her class of little
girls a list of words with instructions
to write stories making use of the words
The list was a formidable one, includ-
ing Chemistry, Photography, Sorrel
Peculiar, Apparel, Similar Popular
Biography, Biography Physics, Hy-
giene, Scientific, Shrivel and Solar
Here is the way in which one youthful
genius got them all into one short para
graph
"A strong MUSCULAR young man
was making experiments in CHEMIS-
TRY and PHOTOGRAPHY He was
often seen on a SORREL horse, array
ed in PECULIAR APPAREL, some
thing SIMILAR to that of Ichabod
Crane He was not POPULAR with
the fashionable young men of the town,
being engaged in writing a BIOGRA-
PLY of Samuel Morse the inventor Of
TELEGRAPHY. He also gave lectures
to the students on PHYSICS and HY-
GIENE. He called on a young lady,
one evening and made himself so dis
agreeable talking about SCIENTIFIC
subjects that the young lady's father
dealt him a blow in the SOLAR plexus,
which caused him to SHRIVEL and
fade away. The wonderful works of
this energetic young man are still I'M
finished to this day
If any older people think they can
beat that with the same list of words.
let them try
@ Q @ @
I noticed that after the arrival of
the Oregon girls there was a sudden
cessation of use of the ;erm "Oregon
beauties" as applied to them in the
local newspapers. 1 wondered why it
was, because the girls were certainly
entitled to be called beauties just the
same when here as when on the way
in fact all young human females are
entitled to it. 1 asked a newspaper
friend and he did an explanatory tale
unfold: 1t was the work of Deacon
Trent. The deacon asked that the
Oregon beauty" business be stopped
when the girls came. Trent, as is well
known, was deputized to look after
them. He is a bach lor, with pro-
per degree of bachelor bashfulness and
didn't think it would be nice for the
papers to BE- always mentioning the
Oregon beauties" I suppose he was
right Anyhow his idea prevailed, as
the newspaper files show.
@ Q @ @
The political outbreak of the week
has been very amusing. 1t is enter
tanning indeed to see the readiness with
which a brick is thrown at every head
that makes it's appearance. The Lane
machine" comp osed of a dozen or so
leaders who seem in excellent mood to
knife one another, has doomed on the
horizon as a humorous between-cam-
paigns development. The fun has been
added to by the Advertiser, which sud
denly reused itself during the discus
sion to declare day after day that
Prince Kuhio has such strength with
the voters that Lane found it no use
to think of supporting anyone else.
How strange to see the Advertiser
booming KuhiO,-and booming him by
of the truth!
c G c G
Bert Peterson has threatened dam
age suit against the b. p. O. e., on
account of the song Everybody Works
but Peterson" and l wish he would
bring it, for I think the trial would
be as good a show as the one the Elks
gave. OF course there was a real libel
in intimating that Bert doesn't work,
for we all know he does, though he does
it so happily it seems to be play. l
he make a kick to Jimmy
DOugherty, who has charge of the
Elks programme, and was told that
the song couldn't be stopped,-someone
had to stand for the jokes and why not
Bert. In the language of the Floro.
dora sextette, Jimmy sang to the in
dignant Bert:
I'VE must josh someone,
We must josh someone, really,
And it might as well be you"
G G @ G
The funniest thing about our politics
is the rich profusion of leaders"
Those who remember the Banderlog
legislature will recall that this was
the richness that led the Home Rulers
to disaster. With an overwhelming
majority they went into session only
to find that each brainy statesman in
the bunch" intended to lead, and the
result was parliamentary chaos. 1t
is much the same today. In ten min
utes 1 can find you half a dozen men
on the street corners who can tell exact