The San Francisco call., 1906-09-16
Edward Russell Analyses
the Britons Claim to that
Distinction.

NO. IT is too heavy" was the sweet
reply
An American lady who. didn't care
for tuft hunting or Summing wanted
TO see the real middle -middle-the
backbone OF the British nation. So
she climbed a hill near a cathedral
town-perhaps the one where Aunt
Liz" lived-to look for II. Sure
enough. pretty soon 1t came. ascend
ing the slope in the shape of a rubl-
cLnd, rotunJ father and fresh Oxon-
ian son-roast beef and gravy-peaches
and cream-good enough to eat. She
thoprht Of the blackleg scoundre1 types
she lad just seen at the French Cham
her OF Deputies and contrasted the
superb ea-on-the-terrace members OF
the British Parliament
While thus pensing she noticed a
woman a the foot of the hill trying to
climb with heavy picnic basket and
a lot of rugs. The poor thing once
stumbled and fell upon hands and
knees. My friend was about to rush
70 her rescue, not connecting her IN
any way with the group resting. at
say. without moving:
Mother looks blow'd"
The father replied, Yes, she do"
In an English family I knew the
lord when he was ready to retire at
night simply turned off the gas in the
sitting room. without word, leaving
his wife in darkness to drop her read
ing or sewing and follow him as best
she could, her only word being, Are
you going to bed now, father?"
One more-this tres intime
All the parties dead. and the anec-
dote being strengthened by names sig
nifying such solid respectability. cul-
ture, position and worldwide fame,
viii break the seal and mention them.
When the great DR.. Freeman of Eng
land, by soma considered the most
learned historian of all times, visited
this country he was for a while the.
guest OF Professor Newberry of the
Columbia School of Mines.
1t was the custom of DIR. Freeman
when he left the house to drop his
slippers. TO be picked up by his wife,
q frail, pallid exemplary, who set them
by the fire 10 be warm for his return.
When he came in she ran to get them,
knelt down and, removing his shoes,
put the slippers on.
Perhaps after a while she seemed
to notice that il was not the custom
of the other ladies in the house to do
likewise; at any rate, she grew en-
ponderous psychologist of ancient fc-
tion appeared she was sitting by the
fire and no slippers were there.
He gave one terrible glance and ex-
ploded into indescriptibles, whereupon
the weak creature started up stairs for
the slippers.
The door closed, Professor Newberry,
albeit with all his high sense of the
respect due TO a guest. turned and said:
Look here Freeman, II you must
have some one take of your dirty boots.
I'll get it done for you or do it myself;
but Mrs. Freeman shall never do it
again in my house"
There is a peculiar cry that once
heard is never forgotten.
In rambles around London one quick
~ learns TO recognize il.
In other cities II is not heard often
enough TO be distinguished.
The shrek Of oman beaten by a
man.
Darwin. in his studies of amphibious
conjugal relations. curiously states that
man is the only animal except the seal
that maltreats its mate.
OF human species the Briton is wife
beating animal par excellence.
From aristocracy down. through the
middle middle to butcher, baker and
candle-stick maker. one hears of the ad-
ministration of this tonic so often he
scarcely knows il it is regarded as
crime or virtue
''sorter makes 'ome 'omey. seems
like"