davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
Short Stories
A LESSON TO EDITORS

Tact In the arrangement Oh nj III he
one OF the features that mleht 49,,
commended to the attention oil Ilet,o ~,
polltan editors AS an instance @ lna'
cannot be said to establish the posses nnv
sion of high degree Of that happy
Ta%uIty The Living Church calls at
tentIon in both the New York Herald 10
and New York World of January 20
ia the following combination OF TWO
independent pieces OF news under ono
heading:
mad DOG ATTACKS CLERG Y NAN
Especial Dispatch to the HerainJ
"WINSTED, Conn. Sunday'-A sinaIi
rabid dog attacked Rev. s Wolcot,
Linsley rector Of ST. James Gpistop'',
church as he was walking in the street
yesterday afternoon and bit plece
out OF his trousers. The dog WAS
killed,
The Mems club OF the Second Con-
eregatIonal church last night depated
the question, Resolved, That the Keep
ing Of dogs Is u benefit to the town
Judges decided the debate In favor OF
the affirmative side
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
CALLED DOWN HARD.

Beltraml (Mlpn) Graphic.
On Sunday afternoon a certain indi-
vidual shot and wounded my New Elm
setter. hunting dog. and we were In
formed that certain young farmer lad
east of the city done the shooting, but
upon close examination we have se-
cured the sworn statement of three wit
nesses as to the Identity Of the guilty
party and 1t was no young lad either
In our judgment this shows a very low
principal of a man. and we should ad-
wise him for his own good that such
practice should be done away with, and
he may come TO the same conclusion
before this matter is settled
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
DID NOT FEEL THE PIN.

Army and Navy Life.
1t was during a dinner that n mator
began expatiating upon his favorIte
subject. namely. that Indians could
not be civilized. A brother bachelor
took pin from his buttonhole bouquet
and ran it deep into one of the major g
legs in warning him that the colonel
and his wife, sitting opposite, had
lately adopted a papoose.
Educate him-do what you Will with
him." continued the major, "he will al
ways use tomahawk when he gets q
chance"
Next time you stick a pin In me-"
he said to the brother bachelor after
the dinner was over, on being chded
for not needing the warning, "remem-
Der which is my wooden leg"
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

that he is living, although neither one
Is his Wife. are not actually real They
have only tho appearance of that
which is claimed"
All we have TO do is TO take this
comforting arrangement OF the Deseret
News and everything is satisfactory.
The prophets reserve the right 20 as
sert that the thing that appears does
not exist. and that reality is shadow
until the prophets, seers, and revelators
delgn to conclude that 1t Is actual
reality" And then the appearance"
which has been denied becomes fact"
and the "actuality" which has been
disputed becomes the law OF God.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
Observer Observations

I observe that even preachers are
betrayed into saying that which they
ought to regret.
That between the Mormon and the
Gentle preachers the cause of the re-
cent earthquake is fully settled.
That the loss OF ones temper is far
more serious, many times, than the
loss Of ones money.
That when pride goes before a fair
IL doesn't remove any of the cobble-
stones from the way,
That life is never so sweet To US as
when we stand in fear OF losing it.
That the effect OF "affectation" is 10
make the beholder OF 1t sea- sick
shadows before" does not apply to
earthquakes.
That they who laugh at Nature do
their laughing first,
That some people arc fools enough
to suggest that God would destroy
thousand innocent women and children
just to catch a few anarchists,
That 1t is quite the fashion for the
patrons of cheap boarding houses 10
pick their teeth in the lopbics Of fash
lonable hotels.
That an enterprise on foot" Is gem
orally preferred to a ride on an "old
hobby"
ON ORTHOGRAFY.
/ obzery that reformashun In sum
men5 karaktrz IL NOR important than
a reformashun In thar orthografy.
That the foolishr pepl get the NOR
tina ooant too sho 1t OF In tipe.
That childrn hoo no nuthing and
koleg folks hoo no 1t al spell bi the
sam roolz,
That the foolz ar not al ded let II ooe
red korektly.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
ART ABOVE NATURE

Or, Emil Reich in London Lecture
Art is one OF the greatest phs
OF our world 1t Is one Of the n
rious of things. Nature has
Nature is grotesque and weird,
Is ours. 1t is human, Art meal
thing A system OF philosoph)
much art as beauty In sculphi
rhythm and cadence In poetry.
is the art OF living. the art OF 4
people,
No bird gives real music, U
nightingale sends out only weir3
but IL isn't music. The only
sound in nature Is the sound n
dripping from a rock. Art NJ
nature, anti-nature. 1t Is Desl
tation nor rivalry. but somal
give 10 nature.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
A CLOSE SHAVE FOR BEDE.

Cleveland Loader.
Congressman Bede OF Minnesota stu
looks back with horror on an expert
ence he had with a Scandinavian audi
ence in his State last campaign. II
was up in the pine woods, ana tne
other orator of the evening was a stall
wart Norseman who was to speak in
his native tongue This man failed to
arrive, and the Committeeman asked
Bede: do you speak Norwegian still?'
Bede unthinkingly replied In the az
f1rmativc, though he knew only few
phrases When he faced the audience
of about 200 big, blue-eyed chaps of the
Ole and Nels class, he determined to
get out of the difficulty ss best he
could, so he said; LAS many of you
as can not understand English stand
up" All were ashamed TO make such
an acknowledgment and not man
moved. "All right, my friends, said
Bedc. ''as 1t makes me hoarse to talk
Norwegian for any length OF time, III
just address you I'm English, which you
all know and Will appreciate as we'll"
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
A COCK AND BULL, s7o,

New York Tribune. ~
The great productiveness az N.
Of Babylon In the way of anr,s-,
has aroused the suspicious N :;
An American who was eoIry /.
with guide became distrusfl
ease with which these relIcs 4.
disinterred Accordingly ne -
to his guide While they were -
about the tower OF Nimrod that
ticularly wished TO find one ~
a special design. On the ore p
a horses head, with some sticks,
roughly between the ears. aua
other side a bull and a fowl n
of Growing. The guide reous,fl
to draw on paper a picture Of d
sides Of the coin, which the n
did. About a week afterward N
coin came to light There was 5o'
of It's genuineness. for on ,the &
was a mares nest and on the \
a cock and a bull.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
A CASE OF NECESSITY.

Cleveland Newr
One Sunday two small boys were in
dustriously digging in vacant lot.
when a man who was passing stopped
to give them a lecture.
Don't you know that it is a sin to
dig on Sunday, unless 1t be n case Of
necessity"
Yes, SIR" timidly replied one of the
boys.
Then why don't you stop itp'
Cause this Is case of necessity"
replied the little philosopher. "A fell
Ter can't fish without bait"
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
IF HE HAD $40. 600. 600.

N TT NIWFT1y tn IfUTnNn Die.
Rogers once walked into the hut of
Ned Haskins. who lived the life Of
semi-hermit In hut eight feet square.
close TO Fort Phoenix In Fairhaven.
Mass. where Mr.. Rogers's summon
house stands now
Ned. what would you do if you had
$40. 000, 0001" asked Rogers.
"By jings," said the hermit, after
long cogitation. I'D have this hut built
two feet larger
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
A SIMPLE MINDED cURATE

The English papers tell story of a
supplemented rural curate who was
Invited 10 London to spend a week at
great house. The curate. ignorant OF
society," asked advice OF a man of the
world, who told him how he should
conduct himself and wound up with
the words: II think. too you had bet
ter take servant with you" II will"
said the curate. and In due time the
poor fellow arrived at the residence of
his host with some modest luggage and
housepaid.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
TRICK ON THE HORSES

Icelanders have strange but effec-
tive plan for preventing horses from
straying away They tie the head of
one horse to the tail of another. and
the head Of this to the tail OF the
former. In this state 1t Is impossible
for the horses to move on. either back
ward OF forward. II disposed to move
at all, II will be only I'm a circle, and
even then there must be mutual agree
ment to turn their heads the same way.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
NOT SURPRISING.
Philadelphia Ledger.

Philadelphia Ledger,
Mr.. Nervey-I suppose you /
object of my call. sir. To BE-
want to marry your daughter-
Mr.. RoXley-Eh? Whas1
prised that you should think d
thing. The idea
Mr.. Nervey-Nonsensei foa'r
diced against the girl She's all
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
Here and The,
AS TO CHAIRS

AS TO CHAIRS
Now York Press.
a customer ordered Sly
for his dining-room. Tho dsms .msd
strated. II beg a thousanser !
he said, but do you Ins,s. pa
the six chairs having armsy,ca "a
what l said" returned ,s.
Have you any obfect,ne e cp'
armed chairs2" "Oh deas lea" 70
all; l am here to try to nloaah ,he
1t seemed SO unusual that u
to make sure" What is ue<
fcatureY" We'll, it is wise ns y,
look out for the comfort of ~.
folk "A woman at dinner e
slbly be comfortable In an a~
In the first place. she cant sa ns
gracefully In the second s su
her gown TO drape on ona s,a ,
other, and no gown can dr.u
armed chair. That is WHY r
make n set of six chairs four
What do you mean by four az: I
-Four chairs without arm
with EN-" by Jove, never !,
that. Make the order four ans M
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

Speaking Of the California calamity,
Mr.. Rockefeller says that at a time
liket every man should do his part.
And yet he may not greatly increase
his subscription.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

Gen Nogi of Port Arthur fame is
paying the penalty of popularity at tho
hands OF autograph seekers. Bur tho
form which this has taken In Japan ha 9
about 1t touch of sentiment. mas
inuch as the relatives of soldiers who
fell before Port Arthur are seekin, ~
Generals autograph Inscription to pIaco
on the tombstones of the dead.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

News OF the great nisfortunes of
others has rot made us so we'll salts
fed with our own lot, however, that we
cannot complain of a little unpleas
ant weather.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
RAT THAT SCAREc

New York Press.
One Of the old-school book -.
another generation told ahor,
OF a porter who caught a ra, :.
tened a bell to Its neck W.
turned loose again and rnn Az
building all other rats left IN y
the strange member OF ths,,
that was trying to associate w,.,
The janitor of q bank In clsva,''
lowed the Idea in this old s,o--
works out just as the school 4,
IL did Traps set every might ~.
with the rodents and yet me-
10 be no end to their rava,,
morning the tanltor chlorofos,'.
fellow and fastened a wire loos 7.
ly to It's neck To this loon =
tached three tiny tinkIine IN
Rat was revived by being nlse
fore an electric fan and then ,n.'
go again. His bells have sis.'
heard tinkling behind the vail.
is a lonesome ,wanderer thrm..
was once a populous rat civ Z,
rats have left this building III
monarch of all he surveys
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
THE WEDDING RING FINGER.

Philadelphia Record
The universal acceptance among civil
lied nations and from time immemorial
OF the third finger Of the left hand as
the wedding ring finger is regarded
by most people as the blind following
of custom which was inau ugurated by
~him or chance, but that It has
deeper significance than mere sentiment
and scientific cause for Its selection
appears from what was said by a mem
Der of the Philosophical society the
other day in a desultory discussion Of
the subject. The third finger Is the
only one where two principal nerves.
belonging to two distinct nerve trunks,
meet. The thumb forefnger, middle
finger and one side of the third finger
is supplied from the radlal nerve, while
tho other side of the third finger and
the little finger are supplied from the
ulnar nerve. AT the tip OF the third
hnger union of the two nerves takes
places. so that this finger is scientifical-
ly typical OF matrimony
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
HE PLAYED THE FLY sPECKS.

Bandmaster Hemenway Of South
Framingham led the band in the old
days of E-nat cornets, One day while
filling an engagement. he selected
march. and while playing IT the rest
OF the band were surprised to hear,
instead Of the customary E-flat mel
ody, series Of startling and brilliant
variations. One Of the players looked
over Hemenway's shoulder and no.
tlced that his page was so covered with
fly specks that the notes could hardly
be seen.
How could you read and play that
part?" he asked,
Young man" said Hemenway, "I
played everything there, fly specks and
all"
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

One popularity OF the Transvaal eli
mate Is that. while being very healthy,
1t yet has the effect OF making people
appear far older than they really are.
The rarefed air Is popularity supposed to
be responsible for this
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

Maude Adams was seen last week
In one Of tho best acts of her career,
that OF giving a thousand dollars to
the Hearst relief fund
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

Jewsharps are made principally In
Boccorio, the seat Of the industry since
the sixteenth century. A good work
man can make seven dozen In a day.
ana, simple as the little instruments
are, no fewer than twenty tools are en-
ployed in their manufacture.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

While all are finding pleasure In CIV
ing. probably a good many Will con-
tinue to like other sources Of pleasure
hotter
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

Various enterprising people through
out the country Will not overlook the
opportunity to secure assistance, by
representing themselves as California
sufferers.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

In the Fort Douglas matter. perhaps
the Utah delegation blames the Salt
Lake people for not telling 1t what was
going on at Washington sooner.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

However. IT would not help the VIC
Tins much. II the scientists were really
able TO tell them the cause OF the
earthquake.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

Notwithstanding the way in which
he was treated. Brother John w Tay-
lor Ia doing all he can for Utah, In the
way of building up new homes in 1t.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

1t may. indeed, be more blessed TO
give than to receive some of the cloth
ing that Will find its way to the Cali
fornia sufferers,
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

Southern California wishes the coun-
try to understand that the earthquake
movement It felt was the gentlest
thing imaginable.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

The vote of the Senate committee on
the Smoot case will be taken on Fri
day. and 1t is expected that It will be
a Black Friday for Mr. Smoot.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

Among the many good things the
Hartman system is doing for San
Francisco Is that of urging sightseers
to stay away.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

1t is stated that the best managers
pattern designers and dyers in the Ian
cashire cotton mills, tempted by hiph
wages, are going out to India and
japan to take charge of mills there
Great quantities of textile machinery
are also being exported.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
THE ONLY WAY.
Puck

Jess-Why on earth did Gladys marry
Charley Dumley2
Tess-Oh, she took the greatest fancy
to Charley's Boston bull and he would
not give her the dog
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

Our City Council would like a little
aid itself in the way of information as
to the way in which it may legally
help the sufferers
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

What the City Council would like TO
do Is to send the relief money first,
and find a legal justification for 1t af-
terward
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

pains to ascertain whether n sus-
pected man was guilty or not. they
might not have a chance to shoot him.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
ODD AND INTERESTING

Patagonian llamas live for years with
out tasting water. and breed of COWS
near Losere. France, and noted for the
richness of the milk. takes 1t very
rarely.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

IL Fort Douglas is a nice. quiet place
the coming summer, the Utah delega-
ton In Congress can claim credit for IT,
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

Why should Fort Russell get so
many soldiers? Wyoming has no larger
delegation at Washington than Utah
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
Wednesday, April %, 1905.

II IS certainly more blessed 10 give
than to be in a position where one mas
to receive.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
FATE

Copyright by Houghton. MimIn G. Co :
The sky Is clouded. the rocks are hare.
Inc spray of the tempest is white IN
play. at
And 1 shall not tempt the sea to-day
The trail is narrow, the wood Is dim
The panther clings to the archIne Ill
ana the hons whelps are abroad al nia :,
And l Shall not Join In the chase to-dn~i!
But the ship sailed safely over tho soo
In glec; o ohase
And tho town that was builded upon y
Was swallowed up in the eartboualo
shoSh Bret Hartc
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

Among the countless plans that the
earthquake interfered with were
number for the commission of crime
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

Already, a benefit from the fire can
be seen for San Francisco, as emma
town is to be moved to the outskirts.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

A German student finds one of tbo
causes of the inability of the Russian
railroads to handle their traffic is the
antiquity of their locomotives The
number Of these seems In tolerable pro-
portion to the traffic. for out OF IA 32s
locomotives no less than 6919 are from
twenty-four to twenty-six years old
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

Some San Francisco guards evil
IDENTIFY feared that II they took more
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
CHEER Up

Cheer up The world is bright.
And clouds will drift away,
The darkness OF the night
Precedes the break of day
The sun is brightest, boy.
That follows after rain:
And oh! how keen is toy
When We have gone through main
Detroit Free Press
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

No oommunIcn ton in relation TO publication
In or business fer Tho Tribune should be ad-
dressed to any Individual or officer OF TINS cor
poration Matters relating to puoiicetion
should be addreascd to the Editor OF lhe ltd
upe and commune ations relative to supscrlp-
tIons and advertsipg and othor business
should be addressed 10 Salt Lake Tribune foo-
lahinG Company.
Tho Tribune is Gallo at all tho principal
uewu stands In the United btAtes-
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25
Where The Tribune Is On Sale.

Murray Utah-Excelslor Stationery 70. ASa
phone It'll c.,,.,
Provo, Utah-A. ". Robinson II East Cen1eT
Btreet. 80
Ssw Ycrk-AYthur HotaliuE. Broadway eno
Thirty y-eiGhth Street: Astor House. Wa'oo''
Astoria Imperial Hotel
Chtcng@Palmcr House, Auditorium Ahpe
WashlpRton-New WiHord Raleigh
Umaha-Jnion Station Newsstand.
Fortlnnd--Orcgon Nova Agency.
Los &nseles-Amos'a EowGlStand ~
Sen Franclsco-Arding's News Agency,
Nheotcy. Hotel ST Frnncis, Foster q Ins
seaitle--W Ellis Hotel Northern. J. H. 'oS
tice, Wilson. McYey Co. ,,,r,,r
oenver-JulIus Plack, Brown Hotel. keno'eA
Book and Stationery Co. xs,s,,
Boise-Idnnhn Hotel Boieo Book and 1 MInso
Store. Arch. Cunningham 6 Co.. ID ee"@'
Co.
pocateiIo-Chanes A. Co., II II. Whittlnsey.
Tonopah-OrEeil q Co.. A. Fl RopnsNeGG
Goldneld-Hunter Adv Pub Co..
Marsh.
Tutte-Kecfe Eros. j. G. Evans
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-04-25

Entered at tho Pos,ofYlco of Salt Lake S'S
ms eecond-olaso matter
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1906-08-04
GaIvestOn's Sea Wall

makes life now as safe in that city as
on the higher uplands. Z. w. Goodloe.
who resides on button, ST., in Waco,
Tex, needs no sea wall for safety. He
writes: 81 have used DR.. Kings New
Discovery for Consumption the past
hve years and 1t keeps me well and
sale. Before that time had cough
which for years had been growing
worse Now it's gone" Cures chronic
Coughs, La Grippe, Group, Whooping
Cough and prevents Pneumonia.
Pleasant to take. Every bottle guaran-
teed at Jacksons drug store. Price
0Oc aud 81. Trial bottle free.
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1906-08-04
Seems Strange
that Anybody

should overlook the vital matter
of carrying insurance on their
property.
Few men stop to think that
fires have a habit of occurring
unexpectedly. They never give
notice in advance. No man can
look into the future and tell what
is going to happen. A man may
work and slave for years in ac-
cumulating a little property, but
fire is powerful enough to wipe
out his savings in an hour. We
are ready to talk fire insurance
when you are. You can buy the
best of every kind insurance from