Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1906-09-25

again i'm Newark, Mr. Bryan used
an anecdote to illustrate what Mr..
Bryan says the Republican party
has been doing to excuse its failure
to curb the trusts. When he launches
this yarn he pulls down the corners
of his mouth in a quiZzical manner.
effects a drawl and slowly moves his
the task to recite the obituary over
the body Of one lately departed
There was once a man." goes Mr..
Bryan's story, who was sued in
court for returning with a crack
across the bottom of it kettle he
had borrowed from a neighbor. The
neighbor was very angry.
THE man who was sued put up
hadn't borrowed the kettle. Then
when that failed, he said that
the kettle was cracked when he bor-
rowed it. And finally when his sec
ond argument was disproved he said
that he had mended the crack be-
fore he returned the kettle.
And that" concludes Mr.. Bryan,
''is the way the Republican party
defends itself against the charge Of
not keeping its promises on the sub
ject Of trust regulation"
The Nebraskan's argument that
In Dnnnh1innnS I,.nx oil ON
funds out the pockets of the men
who find the high tariff to their ad-
vantage he finds well illustrated by
story which is not altogether new.
After explaining his belief that no
Republican dare touch the present
tariff for fear of offending those
who, he alleges, contribute the mon
ey for the campaign work, Mr.. Bryan
tells the following:
"There was once a man who went
into a clothing store. He stole
coat and started to run down the
street The clothing dealer hurried
out into the street and shouted stop
thief but the thief would not stop.
"Then the dealer appea ed to a
policeman and the policeman shout
ed stop thief but the thief would
not stop. Then the policeman drew
his revolver and shouted to the flee
ing thief, stop, or I'll fire. Then
the excited clothier cried out to the
| policeman
shoot him I'm the pants; the coat
belongs to me-"
$50 there you are" concludes Mr..
Bryan after reciting his anecdote.
THE Republican party don't dare to
shoot the thieving trusts i'm the coat,
because the coat belongs to them.
They don't dare to shoot the trusts
in the pants, because the pants be-
long tn them. They don't dare to
shoot anywhere, for fear of hitting
something that belongs TO them"
Mr.. Rryan sometimes makes jokes
at the expense of himself and of the
issues upon which he has met defeat.
While he was being taken over to
Newark on the third day Of his stay
i'm New York he told the newspaper
men this tale:
MY former campaigns and the
results that came of them remind me
of man who came out to Nebraska
to take up farm" said he. This
man was a greenhorn and he did not
know much about the cyclones that
sometimes visit our prairies. But he
had some sort of wisdom.
He put strange looking wooden
fence about his place that looked like
chicken coop. 1t was built In
| triangular shape A farmer drove
| by VIXEN this greenhorn was putting
up his fence and commented upon its
apparent instability.
"'Why. the first good wind that
comes along he said, will blow
your fence over like jackstraws.'
"'Oh. all right said the green
horn. who was also an optimist. My
fence is five feet broad at the bot
tom and four feet high. If 1t blows
over it will be a foot higher than it
| is now.
"Thats what I hope my political
fence is like" said Mr.. Bryan. with
a laugh.
Another Bryan story was lifted
bodily by Congressman LentZ in his
speech at New Haven on August 81.
Mr.. Lentz was busy holding the
crowd until Mr.. Bryan should appear
for the meeting of the New England
Democrats in the Tontine hotel,
across the street, so the use of the
Bryan thunder was, perhaps, per-
miSsible.
There was once a funeral out in