Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-12-16
ANSWERS TO
CORRESPONDENTS

proper nature submitted to The Star 1nqurers
sers 10 unc Sn Jasp.r" star oee In case Of df
hcult conundrums answers may he delayed for
for all questioners watch this column carefully
GOOD FORM.-what Is the proper style
for addressing the wife Of ambassador
In a letter? A.-The generally accepted
form Is Dear Madam but there are ex-
allied precedents for adopting the more
graceful style. My Dear Maria"
POLITICAL.-Would ii not be better IL
the Constitution were changed that the
President might dissolve Congress when
ever 1t makes faces at him, as the kaiser
has just done with the reichstas? A.-That
depends upon the point of view and the re-
suits of the new elections. 1t Is barely pos
sible that an American President might be
perfectly willing to endure a few con-
gressional grimaces rather than the real
sour looks OF a new crowd.
LEX.-What is the "unwritten law" A.
We give it up. If that question could be
answered the law would be written.
F. A. c. You newspaper folks have
played havoc with my domestic arrange
ments, advising the women to shop early.
My wife has been shopping early and often
ever since the advice was given, and L
don't know whether | am keeping house or
not Doesn't that sting your conscience?
A.-Not at all, friend. And besides. what
right have you to kick as long as you re-
tain the inestimable privilege of paying
the bills?
TEACHER.-Dont you think II was real
mean In the House subcommittee not to
wait a few days for the superintendent OF
schools to give him a chance to guide them
properly in shaping the appropriation bill!
Aust the meanest thing that ever hap
pened. 1t was positively rude to a co-ordi-
nate branch Of the government. And be-
Sides the members of that subcommittee
undoubtedly missed lot of fun.
MODERN-Do you think It is wise. Uncle
Jasper to perpetuate the Santa Claus myth
in our homes today? Alphabetically II is
unwise, dear sir or madam, whichever the
case may be. You ought to teach your
children that their Christmas presents arc
really sent to them by President RooGe-
welt. II you don't want to explain to them
in painful detail just how you make the
money that buys them In the department
stores. Some folks would rather play Santa
Claus In a draft than lift the domestic lid
in that fashion.
In olden days when statesmen wished
Their sentiments to conceal
They used ink which heat alone
Its tracings would reveal
But now alas, our civic chiefs.
And diplomats, too.
Write letters voluminous in an ink
That never fades from view.
All. better far 'twoud be IL they
Aye, ambassadors wives
Wrote letters in ink that showed but
And never again in their lives.
X. c. B.-Why didn't the House adopt the
proposition to increase salaries from 5000
to $500 If most of the members favored
| it? A.-Probably some of them were i'm
pressed by the undeniable fact that 5000
| in the pocket is much better than $500 in
the pocket of a successor
B. F. B.-I understand President Roose-
welt intends to stick to the simple spelling
| in his own correspondence. even though he
| does drop 1t from his official documents. Ism {
| that somewhat inconsistent? A.-By no
means. The President Is simply exercising
| his constitutional right to life. liberty and
| the pursuit of happiness while obeying the
| law. Furthermore, this plan makes 1t pos
sible for those who want to catch the
Presidents eye to write to him In reformed
English.
IRATE.-My' neighbours daughter, who is
tone-deaf, is taking singing lessons and the
partition walls not sound-proof Have
| ground for action for the abatement of
nuisance? A.-You might be acquitted on
the ground of justifable homicide IL you
can prove that the girl Starts singing be-
fore 5 o'clock in the morning But before
proceeding to vigorous measures why not
try mocking bird as a counter irritant?
UNCLE JASPER.