Valentine Democrat. (Valentine, Neb.) 1900-1930, 1906-01-04
~~N~@N~~~~

point on they disagree. Can Congress
decide?-Tacoma Ledger.
! Millionaires who claim pensions TO
perfect their army records" must have
peculiar views of what an honorable
discharge means-Philadelp Inquir-
err
The canal men want a clubhouse
and the Canal Commission has agreed
to furnish it. The Home for Super
ANIMATED Ditch Diggers can be built
| later.-Puck.
The New York Four Hundred has
now been cut down to 81. If it were
reduced to one the general puStic
would be but little the poorer.-Jack
sonville Times-UniOn.
Let us build the canal for ourselves,
not for our grandchildren. If our
grandchildren want to be prominent in
the game they can pay for it.-New
York Evening Mail.
If New York's 400 has shrunk to 70.
how long will it take the exclusive set
to become extinct? This sum cannot
be worked by vulgar fractions-St.
Louis Globe-Democrat.
Secretary Shaw says that we want
more elastic currency. Right you are,
Secretary; something that will stretch
from one pay day to another.-Phila-
delphia Evening Telegraph.
The report that gold has been dis
covered on the Isthmus of Panama is
probably founded on the fact that a
good deal of it has gone there that nev
er came back.-New York Mail.
1t is evident that the Car intends to
keep Poland for the purpose of having
something to kick when he feels the
necessity Of giving expression to his
feelings-Chicago Record-Herald.
Chicago people are now Directing to
the public use of toothpfcks. For peO-
pie who have just learned to use tooth
picks, those Chicagoans are becoming
awfuIly fastidious.-Atlanta Journal.
Several military and naval officers
are predicting another war. The wish
is father to the thought, for a period
&C profound peace is not conducive to
glory or promotion.-Duluth News
Tribune.
Mr.. Rockefeller attributes his riches
to association with good men and the
influence of the church. 1t will be OBJ
served that not even Mr.. Rockefeller
is Dragging about the secret rebate
Kansas City Star.
1t is estimated the Sultan could
present every man, woman and child
in his country with an ultimatum from
his large collection and still have
enough left to lay under all the carpets
in his royal palaces.-Pittsburg Ga
Zette.
1t is pretty hard to figure out
whether that false Car who is trying
to start something somewhere in Rus
STA is man Of remarkable bravery, of
almost unthinkable rashness or merely
doesn't grasp the horrors of the situa-
News.
Ambassador Reid is arguing at
great length over in London his right
to be known as the American Ambas-
sador" to England. All right, Mr.. Reid,
you have our consent to assume any
title that suits your fancy. Your purse
is equal to any tle.-Indianapolis
Star.
The determination of the New York
reformers to get the man higher up
and connect him with the election ir-
reguIarities is commendabIe, provided
they get him. AS rule he takes his
vacation after election and allows the
Dispatch.
After nearly nine years Of street
railway reform agitation we have Sue
coded in introducing the thermometer,
which, by the way, does not indicate
how hot the passengers are after they
have been clinging for five miles to an
unelastic strap. But it is something
Chicago Inter Ocean.
At any rate, Haakon, of Norway,
won't be under the disagreeable neces-
sity of wearing a mailed shirt When
the Norsemen want to be rid of him
they won't do anything more than
shoot him out of the country, with a
return ticket to Denmark.-Cincinn
Commercial Tribune.
The only thing lacking in Russia at
present is a fair trial for the constitu-
ton which has not as yet been formu-
lated owing to the fact that the par
ties most deeply interested in it will
not agree to drop everything else
while they are trying on little real
liberty.-Chicago Inter Ocean.
The salaries of the heads of the
banks of England and Germany con-
bined amount to $4,000. The salary
OF the head of the Mutual Life is $780,
600, to say nothing of the salaries Of
the rest Of the McCurdy family. And
McCurdy is provided with an aetuary
to do his knowing for charlottesville
Courier-Journal.
Certainly, hazing should be rooted