davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
THE MIcROBE MAKES LAMENT

1 met a little microbe, twas the
microbe of reform. and gazed upon
the little thing that's raising such a
storm.
This is the hardest kind Of work"
the little microbe said, and some
times makes ms wish I was just com
fOrtably dead. try to wake the peo-
pie up and note the awful way in
which the railroads in a year their
tens Of thousands slay; and sure
they, get excited when l sting them
up, but blame. their enthusiasm leads
them to reform the football game.
Another lot Of people l infected
with the craze for the speedy
reformation of the evils in their gaze.
l thought they'd work like beavers TO
have lynching banned and haired.
but instead they passed a measure
that makes hazing rather hard.
ct is tough upon a microbe that
is doing all he can to infect the keen
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05

passengers and their servants Moth
ing must compete with labor. Chair
coolies and the rikasha runners per
form the services Of horses and cleo
trio railways. The splendid roads IA
cilitate the speed Of the runner and
along the hillside and up 10 its top
macadamized paths penetrate every
habitable ledge and quarried shelf.
The great Chinese city is Of absorb
ing interest Unlike any other native
city in all China. it is well built. CON-
p~aratively clean. and characterized
by many European innovations. The
Chinaman is immutable. We may not
change his mode Of life. his habits
and philosophy, but the E~nglishmsn
in HOngkong has taught him that
cleanliness is gOdliness; that if he
would escape the plague and the
seourge OF disease he must eradicate
filth.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
THE NE'ER DO WELL

Why. there wasn't a child but would some
FOr Of jingies and stories he knew al the
cuarmSs
Yes and even the dogs in the street used
to leap
At his hand with a bark that was laugh
ingly deep
But he never amounted TO much.
And nobody could tell why he had such
a hold
ON the rich n the poor. and ms young
and the old;
He was always on hand for some kind
little deed.
He instinetively knew when a friend was
in need
But he never to much
They have folded his hands. they have
laid him TO rest
And the church couldn't hold all the
friends he possessed
And fair memories mingled their smiles
with the tears
OF the ones who recalled the good deeds
of his yours
But he never amounted 10 much.
W. d. n. in Chicago Trfbu@&
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05

handsome piece Of goods Just two
inches too short for making a dress.
This goods must be Of a kind that can
not be matched in any part Of the
world Further, permit her to court
in a room where the gas eannOt be
turned low and make her wear a skirt
that cannot be lifted on rainy days,
but when this is done be sure and
see she is wearing costly and attract
tive hosiery. After this make her re-
cite the -Cotter's Saturday Night
with a bunch OF hairlIn hi in her mouth.
If. after all these pleasantries she still
survives, chain her Z the floor of a
department store with bargains all
about her that she cannot reach and
handle.
P. S-We desire to inform henpeck.
ed husbands that we viii refuse abso-
Iutely TO give any formulas for tor.
turing cranky m0therinlavs-NeE
York Press.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05

It has always been the popular be
lief that as soon as a man invented
ANYTHING somebody else at once i'm
proved upon it and reaped the greater
benefit. A recent occurrence shows
that the reverse is sometimes the
case.
A young man in this city with a
knack for inventing mechanical appli-
ances recently patented an article
which. it was universally agreed.
would be OF great benefit to railroads.
The agent of a big corporation at once
entered into negotiations with the in
veutor. who fixed an upset price of
$4,000 for his idea. For days they
heat about the bush until finally the
young man agreed to accept $1,000.
The money was paid over, the neces-
sary papers signed and the agent left
highly satisfied with his bargain.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
HAD THE STUDENTS LOST CAP.
Young Lady Hastily Departed. After
Making Restitution.

Young Lady Hastily Departed. After
Making Restitution.
She was apparently from Barnard.
Flushed and pretty. her jaunty jacket
and voIuminous plated skirt tapping
madly in the breeze, she rounded the
corner Of One Hundred and Twentieth
street and Broadway just as a Column
bia student issued from the big gate,
head down, toward her. In . triee the
tiny cap which covered a dozen hairs
in the region OF his gray matter was
swept into space. When he looked
up it had disappeared His eye
searched the horizon. Nothing but a
maiden's p~etticOats describing aerial
circles met his gaze.
Say. mister" cried a shri1 voice
from the corner. want yer cap2 Why
don't you ask her 10 hoist2- ndicat-
ing the swiriing skirts with a compre-
hensive gesture.
A little shrek. a little shake. and
down came the cap from the conceal
ing d~raperies-
I beg a thousand pardons." began
the youth. But the girl was racing
through One Hundred and Twentieth
street as though the furies were afteI
her.-New York World
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
IMPROVED HIS own WORK

A few minutes later a friend OF the
inventor entered the office and found
him chuckling to himself as he bent
ever a drawing board.
You eem happy said the friend.
What's up?'
Il just sold my appliance for a
thousand dollars and got the money
cash down"
"A thousand dollsrss gasped the
friend in surprise. why. I thought
you expected to get at least $1,000 for
it."
$50 1 did. replied the inventor.
but while the agent was diekering
with me all these days. I hit upon an
improvement which Will make the
first affair worth about thirty cents by
comparison. I'm working out the
plans now"
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05

ing plate. At regular intervals on
the plate is a series Of keyhole slots.
r~ecesses being formed in the ear Of
each slot. At the upper end the lock
ing plates are bent at right angles
over the post The c~rosspfeces are
made with plates projecting at the
ends, these plates fitting over the
plates at the tops Of the corner posts
and held in place By Tugs II desired,
additional c~rosspieces can be added
and drawers inserted between them.
the top Of the table is made with
cleats on the under surface. these
eleats fitting into grooves On the
upper cEosspieces.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05

He was gentle and kind; he would plan
half the day
He Would Sit up an night with a friend
And re do YOU a favor would work with
RSt NE never amounted TO much.
There vas something about him that got
II was plain that he never was playing a
IN, p tSat Ill that he did he was doing for
AID that he was a friend who was lasting
Ru S'P he never amounted to much.
an che bovs he grew up with went rising
IN srs We're some who made money, and
all made a names
Art and music and letters. the law or
veT nne oSe Of the rest made tbs most of
his chance
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05

filthy stream. rubbing mud their hair,
and performing their crazy acts OF
heathenism, offers the explanation Of
midas prolonged wretchedness and
degradation.
A thousand different acts Of idiocy
are being performed if n had but
the time to count them. One deluded
Brahmin is smearing himself with COW
AM as a means Of publication;
another is holding his nose so that no
air can enter to defle his body while
he prays; and still another is being
whipped with a peacock feather to
atone for his sins. 1t is nc wonder
that plague and pestilenee are always
preying upon India. The bather in the
Ganges simply wades in filth. The
river reeks with sewer refuse and ey-
cry sort of ofal. l saw a dead dog
float between a worshiper's legs. but
the jealous barbarian was too much
e%ngrossed in meditating upon the los
Manifestations Of SILVA to notice the
carcass or to bother about it if he
did.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05

All travellers agree that the river
front at Benares, the holy CITY OF N
dia, presents n Of the most ehlraol,
binary sights in the world Here IN
the early morning the peopie-olten
hundred thousand Of them-cohls -
battle in the water Of the sacreu
Ganges. For several miles the lo"sf
bank is merely a series OF steps leau-
ing to the water, while overhead there
is a continuation Of terraces crowded
with a conglomerate mass OF empleS
palaces and ruins. When the cary
u shines on the Benares waite iIont
ii reveals the soul Of India. rms
horde Of fanatics wallowing IN me
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
Career Of prize Beauty.

Miss Emma Newkirk OF Santa Mon
lea. whose friends boast that she once
won a first prize in a New York
beauty show, is now in the Northwest
Territory, where she has not only
married a rich man but has been
elected director of a school district
that covers several hundred square
miles of King Edwards iominions.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
sumaree TempIe At eenares.

ing state elephants continue to pass.
and gaudy nautch girls shuttle their
sensuous dance in the dusty streets
One remembers the sleek. lazy cattle
c~omplacently switching flies in the
shade of the temples. and the mud
novels Of the poor people who do not
fare so well. Lastly. there is the pom
pous, self-satished Englishman, mas
ter of the land and guardian OF the
peoples destiny-he may be working
out the salvation of his subjects. but
he seems always to be playing tennis
AMI taking his ease.-LOs Angeles
Tires.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05


In front of the CHAT several corpses
ioated in the water a yard from
where a score OF devout believers
were mechanically repeating their
formula of alteration to the rising sun.
AT the well supposed to be filed with
Vishnu's p~erspiTation is the greatest
congestion of pilgrims and the most
disgusting sights. The so-caIled sweat
OF the divinity is in reality nothing
but black. foul ooze from the river.
made more nauseous and deadly by
decaying donations of butter. milk and
sweets. The insane zealots drink this
polluted slime and carry the offensive
stuff home with them 10 battle their
idols in.
Every crowd is frlnged with begging
devotees-a worthless lot of hypo-
critics who have made all kinds of pre-
posterous vows but who spend most
OF their holy time in soliciting aims.
The census shows that there are
10000 religious mendicants in In
Ola. AS went up the steps by the
burning CHAT the smoke of the funeral
piles were mounting upward and the
lamentations of mourners were min.
gled with the chant of priests. At one
place where the fire had done its work
3 pious ghoul was sitting the ashes in
3 sieve in the hope of finding bits of
1ewelry from the corpse that had Just
been destroyed. He was as absorbed
IN his work as a Klondike miner pan.
ming for gold. 1t would require DAYS
FOR the visitor to see all the temples in
Benares, for there are thousands OF
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
COMING to Terms

Hicks-Doezn't your wife get mad
when you come home late from the
elubz
Wieks-Yes. but I smooth her down.
and sort OF COO her to sIeep-soft soap.
you know
Hicks-I see You find soft soap a
soft sOporifc-
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
Lear and Diners

Lear was making his remarks On
the Sharpness Of a serpents tooth
That's nothing. replied a modern
parent" Just Eait till you have paid
out $4,000 on your daughters voice to
hear her sing Everybody Works but
Father
Herewith the king perceived that
things really might be worse.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
Bavaria SUPPLIES skeletons

Trade in human skeletons. which is
a regular business with certain houses
is most active in September. when the
medical schools and colleges open for
the year. While some skeletons are
obtained in this country. the great
bulk of the supply comes from Bava-
ria. and the price rules high. or low as
The death rate in that country moves
up and down.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
In Abeyznce.

Il thought you were going TO Flor
ida for q couple Of Weeks2
I'm afraid not I've been figuring
on z railroad accident LATELY
You mean you figured in = rail-
road accident
mo. on I've been figuring on that
railroad stock OF mine paying q divf-
dend-7
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
Her AHment

Naybor-I noticed that your wife
didn't look very well this morning
Subbubz-Oh. its nothing serious
NaybOr-Her ayes were very red
and fearful
Subbubs-Yess it's merely a case OF
what you may can millinery hy<
terra"
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
Hard 70 See Justice in mis-.

One woodrow of Mineral county, w.
Va. killed his own baby in its moth
er's arms. He was convicted on her
testimony. but appealed on the ground
that a wife is not a competent wit
ness against her husband. The SUI
preme court OF the State held that his
claim is correct and he probably wiz
go free
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
one PriviIeae D the RIeh.

What would you do il you we're
rich2" asked the New York man
We'll" replied the man from Chi
cago. 4 'spose the first thing I would
do would be 10 have dinner at supper
time, like al the est Of the rich
folks"
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
Rash Ell.

Mabel-Really. I don't care what
sort Of a husband I get
Her Mother-why. Mabel I'm sur
prised AT you
Mabel-So long as he's rich and
handsome and kind to NE, l don't csrs
SO there. nows
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05

Mr.. Borem-I didn't see you last
Sunday.
Miss Cutting-oh, you must have II
you saw me at all
Mr.. Borem-I-er-beg pardon 4
don't understand
Miss CUTTING say If you saw ne
Sunday yOu must have cen me last,
for I was careful to see you first
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
HANDY Foa FaeougNr Movsns.
Furniture Easily Put Together and
Taken Apart

"KnOckdoTn furniture" or furni-
ture which can be quickly taken apart
FOR transportation and as quickly as
sembied again at the next point Of
destination is Of very great value for
certain purposes. An illustration Of a
@~knockdown table, Is shown here. the
invention Of a North Carolina man
It IS strong. durable and efficient and
can be readily assembled without the
Use Of nails or screws.
When taken apart 1t can be packed
within a small space for shipping OF
storage. On the inner side Of each Of
the legs Of the table is a metal lock
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05

mo girl yetg~ asked Mr. subbubs.
arriving home from the Office
NO replied his wife. although
one did call to-day. However. our five
children scared her She said she
might stand two children but"
Then there is nothing for US to do.
dear, but pick out three Of our I'VE and
drown Observation-Disclosures Press
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05

BOy-what's time. mister2
The major CthiRking to fncuIzts
good mannersl-H what7 II what my
boy7
Boy-H you've got a watech-
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
chesp Dentistry in skowheoan.

Doc POoler is a w~ell-known
dentist in SkOwhegan, Maine, One day
a log driver called 10 have a tooth ex-
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
LAUGH AND CHEER UP
HuMoRIsms SPECIALLY BUILT
FOR The PURPOSE.

Wise Judge Made it Easy for Frauiein
to Answer Embarrassing Question
Hotel That He Had Helped to Raise
Lear and Others.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
Making IT easy.

Judge-How old are you, F~rauIein7
CNo answer] Wei. tel me how old
you we're ten years agO.-F1iegends
Blsetter-
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05

suddha and the 30 Tree.
Inc sacred Bo tree of India is re-
garded by all devout Buddhists as the
Q hallowed object in existence.
lheir devotion is prompted by the be
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
Delhi Is spectacular.

Delhi Is Spectacular.
Delhi has much TO claim the atten.
ton Of the visitor in India. Its great
tower is n Of the maryels Of Asia.
and its ruins are numerous enough to
keep the student OF history busy for
days. It's lengthy. populous bazaar
has been the scene OF many brutal
butcheries. the ruthless Nadir Shah
having left a hundred thousand vic
tins In his path when he came to
steal the g-em-encrusted Peacock
Throne and the world-famOus Kohl
noor diamond. Delhi also has a ca
p~acious and striking mosque where
$4,000 worshipers have congregated at
one time. Among the treasures of this
mosque is a red hair from the beard
of Mohammed. Delhi will best be re-
membered by the reader as the scene
of the great Durbar, when the present
King of England was proclaimed EN-
peror Of India by the most gorgeous
and mostly state ceremonial ever
held.
It should be understood that any
single article on the sights Of India
must at best be incomplete. It is a
continent in itself, shording almost as
many contrasts and incOngruities. it
may safely be said. as all other cont.
nents combined. When the journey
through it is completed one is almost
dazed by the mass of impressions re-
corded by the wsy. There fingers the
strident clamor of the bazaars and the
importunate pleading Of the beggars;
grotesque camel wagons and lumber
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1906-06-05
midas Famed Holy City
Benares, with Its Temples and DevOtees, One of
the showpIaces of the Empire.

lief that the great Buddha received his
knowledge while meditating under its
branches. This great person was so
good that flowers sprang up in his
footprints wherever he walked. The
tree under which he sat for such great
length Of time became SO impressed
with his knowledge that its leaves
still tremble on account Of his wis
Gon. An attempt was once made to
destroy this sacred reminder Of the
good mans stay on earth. but when il
vas cut down and burned two trees
at once sprang up in its stead. It is
such traditions that cause the faithful
to still sprinkle milk and perfume
around the roots Of the sacred Bo
tree.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-12-13

photo and autograph, are al
ways in demand by old and.
young and are of use in every
home.
The bee., 1906-04-05

The bitter trail in woman's life Is IL
be childless. Who can tell how hard the
struggle may have been ere she learnt to
resign herself to her lonely lot? The alb
sence of this link to bind marital life
together. the absence of this one pledge
to mutual affection is a common idisap-
pointment. Many unfortunate couples
become estranged thereby. Even II they
do not drift apart, one may read the whole
extent of their disappointment in the eyes
OF such a childless couple when they rest
on the children OF others. To them the
largest family does not seem too numerous.
In many cases OF barrenness or child
lessness the obstacle TO collaborating is
easily removed by the cure Of weakness on
the part OF the woman. Dr. Pierce's Ia.
yorite Prescription has been the means OF
restoring health and fruitfulness to many
a barren woman, to the great 10y OF the
household In other, but rare cases, the
obstruction TO the bearing OF children has
been found to be Of surgical character,
treatment at the Invalids' Hotel and Sur
gical Institute, Buffalo, \. Y, over which
DR.. Pierce OF the vFavorite Prescription
fame presides. In all cases where chill
dren are desired and are absent. an effort
should be made to find out the real cause,
since IT is generally so easily removed by
proper treatment
ments, prolapsus, Inflammation and de-
bilitating, catarrhal drains and in all
cases OF nervousness and debility, DIR.
Pierce's Favorite Prescription is the most
efficient remedy that can possibly be used.
1t has to its credit hundreds of thousands
OF cures more In fact than any other
remedy, put up for sale through druggists,
especially for woman's use. The ingredi-
ents OF which the Favorite Prescription
IS composed have received the most
positive endorsement from the leading
medical writers on Mdterid Medica of all
the several schools OF practice. All the
ingredients are printed In plain English
on the wrapper enclosing the bottle, so
that any woman making use OF this
famous medicine may know exactly what
she is taking. DIR. Pierce takes his pa
tients into his full confidence, which he
can afford to do as the formula after
which the rFavorite Prescription is
made will bear the most careful exam
DR.. Pierce's Pleasant Pellets are the
pest ana safest laxative for women.
The bee., 1906-04-05
Out Of the Nouns Of Millions ,re..

Andrew Carnegie has given warn
ing of the danger of disgrase to the
man who dies wealthy. n. o.
Nelson, a Chicago millionaire, rails
against the lot of the man who lives
IN wealth MIR. Nelson still runs his
business in his own name, but dis
tributes the dividends among his
employees. The average man is per-
verse enough to welcome a tip from
a millionaire how TO make money
and to reject his advise TO cultivate
the virtue of poverty. What the rich
man holds up as his own horrible
example has more weight with the
multitude than his lofiiest precepts
Right or wrong, 1t sticks to the old
counsel that the physicion shall first
heal himself.
The bee., 1906-04-05
coLoRED COLUMN
EDITED BY JAMES =. TODD.

Our sick are Mrs. G. F. Bailey, Lee
Kirby, Mollie Braham, Mrs. Vim
johnson, Lena Johnson, Rev H. A
Keeton, Matthew Gholston, Fate
Wilkes, Terry Riley, Bessie Amos
Scott Davis and Mrs. Robert Foster.
At the b, Y, P, Y, every Sunday
evening at 8 o'clock an interesting
program is rendered at the Mt. Zion
Baptist church for the benefit of all.
Mrs. E. A. Keeton is president.
The Darlington Cornet Band is
making ample preparations to serve
the public on all occasions when
called upon. We should give them
our hearty support AMI appreciate
their untiring zeal to keep band in
our little city. Call az their rehear-
sails and hear them at their band
room.
Mr.. VIM. Bailey came home from
Louisville, where he has been at
tending school for quite awhile, 10
the bedside of his sick mother. His
many friends are proud of him and
expect much of him in the future.
Young men, prepare yourselves for
further usefulness.
Mrs. Queen Shelton and Mrs. l.. G.
Harding are in Princeton, KY, this
week attending the closing exercises
of Prof. w. r. Harding's school,
Mrs. Blanche Shelton, of Oak Hill,
visited her sick sister, Mrs. Bogus,
last week.
There will be an entertainment
given by the c. NJ. e. church sstur-
day night, April IA. Several from
will take part in the
program. The public In general are
invited. Mrs. S. r. Driv-
er is president.
Mrs. Ada Jones made her sister
and friends visit from Madison
vile Tuesday.
Mr.. Dock Halsey, after having Wis
tied his many friends here, has re-
turned to his home at Danville, Ill.,,
leaving his better half to ENJOY
longer visit with her many friends
here. Mr.. Halsey is thorough GO
ing, practical man of his word, ard |
he has been successful in his new
home.
Miss JohR0ie Wilson and little
Jewell Shelton spent Sunday with
Mr.. and Mrs. Edgar Davis.
The Mt Zion Baptist church's an
niversary day was not kept Sunday
nor was the opening, but the above
will be Sunday, April 8. Meeting