Fair play., 1906-01-13

the Job. we managed 10 worry the -
luctant brute up the hill and Into the
| front yard.
My house is built on the top Of q
| hill. and to the south of IL lies a
broad and very long terrace OF
smoothly shaven turf. It at once oc.
Cured to me that this billiard-table
/ plateau was the ideal spot on which
| to tame the mechanical steed had
acquired. so / requested Rogers to
| assist me in getting IL down there.
! Seated on garden chair, with the
/ book of instructions in my hand and
the tricycle. Immediately before me.
| studied the construction of the thing
with ever-increasing intelligence.
A lonely lunch had been quickly
! dispatched and ] was out again on
the lawn basking in the sunshine
! listening to the birds, and reading
some such romantic effusion as fol.
| lows:
Push forward lever A, which opens
the exhaust. This may be closed
when full speed is attained. Advance
B until sufficient air enters the valve.
Set G at such an angle that vapor
enough reaches y TO form correct mix.
ture. u regulates the electric spark.
Care must be taken not to-" etc.
Every now and then / thought I
had II, and sprang into the saddle;i
but the more | learned of theory the
less my practice advanced. 1t seemed
as IL the monstrosity was sulking be.
cause l had jammed back all four
levers at once when we met the horse.
The sun lowered in the west, and I
was just on the verge of success
she had given bark and one kick for
ward--when l heard the crunch OF
wheels on the gravel, and an aston
ished voice cried:
Where on earth did that horror
come from"
This? Oh, this was trundled out
here by a friend of mine from Lon.
don. He left It for me to practice
on. How did the concert go?"
'Excenently hope you don't Intend
to buy that thing?"
''To buy 1t! have no such inten'
ton"
This quite truthful evasion only re-
tarded the electric spark Gas the mo.
tor book has it, for a short period.
quite forgot that | had left my
check book open on the library table.
and that veracious volume gave me
away the moment my women-folk en-.
tered the house.
The check-book divulged the full
criminality of my conduct. The twa
ladies came out. sat down on lawn
chairs, and made sarcastic remarks
about my personal appearance and the
attitudes | assumed in the saddle.
saying that, although we might never
be able to sell the machine, they were
sure, IL | went on the stage, Paddy
Roosky could not compete with me,
and thus we would get our money
! back.
One hind wheel was lacked up, and
was in the saddle, pulling levers
; this way and that pumping with my
feet all the time. The loose wheel in
the air worked easier than when on
the ground. Like a burst of fire.
works the thing went off The wheel
! rotated like mad, and our whole COM
, bination shuddered as If an earthquake
, were in active operation.
Now work the levers till you un.
derstand them" advised Rogers
Alas! he let go the jack and II
, trembled forward. The live wheel
!, touched the earth, and off we went
like a bucking broncho in a cyclone.
have but a dazed recollection Of
what followed. ! remember a scream
from one section of my family, and
yell of "Turnl turn!" from the
other, then the frantic Internal ma
chine plunged down the barberry
slope, and l was shot over the handle
bar head first into dwarf pear-tree.
Poets may write of the beauties of
motoring if they like, but all l have
TO say on the subject is contained
in the original stanza given below.
L'ENVOI.
For Sale, an excellent motor-tri
\ cycle, practically as good as new
! Ridden twice by its present owner
: Brass tank for touring, Reason foI
selling, owner Is writing fiction anC
has no time to devote to more absorb
ing occupation.