Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1906-06-09

"Are you Hungary" "Yes, SIAM"
swell, come along; I'll Fiji"
Downtown-How did Binkers, the
architect, become so poor2 Uptown
He built house for himself.
Dressmaker-And would you have
leg-ofmutton sleeves, madam? Gus
tomer-Most certainly not 1 am a
egetarian!-Punch.
Teacher-Can you tell me the diff
ference between like" and "love?"
Small Boy-Yes, ma'am. l like my
father and mother, but love pie.
Conductor-Why don't you get up
and give that lady a seat2 Passenger
She might say, THANK you" and
have weak heart-Pittsburg Dis
patch.
Ethel-And are you sure you love
me, George2 George-Sure7 Ask my
boss. He says if ! don't stop this
dreaming all day long he'll discharge
me.-Puck.
Yes, old man, we're fixing to go to
housekeeping; what has been your ex-
perience with servant glrls?" ''Hushl
Come over here where my wife can't
hear."-Houston Post.
Papa" said Ruth after her first
day at school, II don't want to go to
school until | learn more, for today
the teacher asked me ever so many
things | didn't know"
Nell-Oh, my! Here's a telegram
! from Jack Of the football team. Bell
What does it say? Nell-It says:
Nose broken. How do you prefer it
/ set-Greek or RomanY
Fond Wife-YouIl think of me
sometimes while you are away, dear7
Fond Hubby-Not likely. Didn't the
doctor say l was to go away for my
health and avoid ell worry scraps.
] Cholly Callow-At any rate the for
tune-teller said | had the makeup of
a gentleman about me. Miss Snappar
! About you? Then why In the world
don't you put the makeup on?-Chi.
cago News.
| wonderful thing-thls eddication,"
said the old man. I'm what way2"
In this way: John knows just enough
Latin, an Greek, an French to know
nothin' at all about maxim liyin'v
Atlanta Constitution.
Haven't you ever thought OF going
to work." asked the farmers wife of
Saunterlng Sam. "Yes'm," replied the
veteran tramp; Il thought Of it once
but was deeleeryus at de time
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Meeks-My wife called me I'D on
the phone six times to-day. Weeks
what for? Meeks-The last five times
were for the purpose of calling me
down because l didn't answer the first
time she called me Philadelphia
Inquirer.
Have you The Art of Making
UpT" asked the lady Of the clerk in
the book store. II don't think | have,
ma'am," replied the young man. II
quarreled with my wife week ago,
and l can't get her to say a word to
| me. "-Yonkers Statesman.
"See herep snapped the landlord,
who had responded to the tenants
hurry call for plumber, II thought
you said the water in your cellar was
two feet deep. It's only a few inch
es." well, that's as deep as my two
feet" retorted the tenant, land that's
too much"
II don't see what a man wants with
two wivesw snorted Mrs. Enpeck, as
she threw down a paper containing an
account of the Smoot case. II don't
either" said Mr.. Enpeck ferYently.
1t must have been the way he said 1t
that made Mrs. Enpeck SO mad.-Lou-
isville Courier-Journal.
| 'There are great things in store for
you," said the fortune-teller to the
young man; but there Will be many
| obstacles to overcome. There Is
woman continually crossing your path,
| q large woman with dark hair and
eyes. She will dog your footsteps I'M
tiringly." "Yes-I know who that is"
"Ah, you have seen herr" Yes; she's
/ nv washwoman."-Mll Milwaukee Sentl-
! mel.
| 1t was the wedding day, and the un-
fortunate bridegroom was making his
exit with the usual accompaniment of
rice and old boots. He snatched his
/ hat from a peg seized an umbrella
from the hall stand, and was going
out of the door, when the brides faith
err called after him: you've taken nv
umbrella, Henry. Bring it back at
once. I've six daughters, but only one
good umbrella"
Doctor" said the patient ~ be-
lieve there's something wrong with
my stomach" Not a bit of It," ra-
piled the doctor God made your
stomach. and He knows how to make
stomachs. There's something wrong
with the stuff you put into 1t, maybe
and with the way you stuff 1t In and
stamp 1t down; but your stomach "a
all right" And Immediately the IA