Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1906-10-27
ing cap to look well in church.

1ney re nlueOuS MI iIdNeIs
and stiff and commonplace and IN
comfortable and"
Are they anything like the mode
q wife you've picked out for me?" in
y quired the bachelor. insinuatingly.
The widow flushed under the cor.
ner of her chlfion veil.
We'll" she acquiesced, unwilling.
ly, "she isn't particularly pretty noI
brilliant and fascinating and all that
but she's just the kind OF a girl a
man ought to marry"
And never does" finished the
bachelor, triumphantly, backing
water and turning the canoe for mid
stream. "Of all kinds of women a
man detests-"
How many kinds Of women are
there?" cried the widow, suddenly:
How many wobien are there?"
retorted the bachelor. THE variety
is only limited by the number of
feminine individuals. But funda-
mentally they can be divided into
two classes, just as automobiles can
be divided into gasoline and electric
There is the woman a man wants
to marry, the kind that is stamped
from birth for wifehood, the even
tempered, steady-going, comfortable
u ND nf nfr ri
tie to for life and with whom you
know you would be perfectly con-
tented-and utterly stupid. Every
man has in mind his ideal wife; and
nearly ever mans ideal is of the
calm, domestic, wholly good, wholly
sweet sort, the sort that seems like
harbor away from the storm. But
so often, just about as he has found
this ideal, or before he has found
her and before the sun of his sum-
mer day dream has risen the storm
comes along"
"The-what?"
"The tumultuous, impossible,
adorable, unfathomable woman-the
woman who may be good or bad,
ugly or beautiful, but is always fas
cinating, alluring and irrestlble.
And she wrecks his little summer
lay dream and turns his snug har-
Dor into a roaring whirlpool and
carries him off In tempest. Some
times he marries her and sometimes
he doesn't; but whether he does or
1oes not. he is always spoiled for the
other kind afterward."
And II he does marry her" add
ID the widow, trailing her fingers
thoughtfully in the water, "he is al
ways sorry and wishing he had mar
ried the other kind"
"Wen," the bachelor laid his
paddle across his knee, what's the
difference? If he had married the
other kind he would always have
been wishing he hadn't. Now II n
man could only be allowed two
wives"
One for week days and one for
holidays?" inquired the widow sar-
castically.
"Yes," acquiesced the bachelor,
"one for each side OF him, the tame
side and the untamed side. One to
serve as harbor and make him n |
home and fulhll his domestic long
lngs and bring mp his children and
keep him sane and moral and the
other to amuse him and entertain
him and inspire him and put the
trimmings on life and the spice and |
flavor In the matrimonial dish"
"A sedatlvo and stlmulanti"
jeered the widow. "One to stir you
up and one to calm you down; one
to spur you forward and one to pull
on the curb-a Hebe and n Minerva!
And then you'd be running around
demanding u Venus 60 mako you for
get the other two, Whatever woman
a man marries. he invariably spends
his life signing for something differ
ent. II he Is tied to nice, soft sofa
pillow, he longs for backbone II
he marrics n parlor ornament. he
yearns for a kitchen utensil, If his
wife has a Greek nose, he discovers
after ward that what he really ad-
mires is pugs, II he picks out red
hair or black. he will go blocks out
lf his way To pursue every yellow
slint cover that catches his eye
And II he married whole harem
It once he would dismonogamy, and
. single wife with single idea.
There aren't enough kinds of wom-