davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1906-03-07

gentleman, if these are your animals,
or insects, or whatever they are, you
ought to come down off your perch
and take them to a Kelley cure, be-
cause they are intoxicated"
And pa came down ana took a fence
rail and sharpened it with an ak, and
ne run it into Bolivar about foot,
and Bolivar trumpeted for surrender,
and that settled the elephant strike;
for pa ordered Bolivar into the road,
and in five minutes the whole herd of
elephants was following Bolivar back
to Washington, as meek as drunken
husband being led home by his wife.
Gee, what do you think? The presi-'
dent heard how the senator's boy and
I stampeded the elephants and invited
the senator's boy to bring his young
circus friend around to the white house
to supper. Well, we went.
forgot what we had to eat, l was
so interested in the presidents CONVEX
sation. He talked about the show bust
ness as though he had been a ring
master in a circus. He said he was in
the show the day before when we
stampeded the elephants, and he told
us about his hunting trips in the west,
until could smell bacon cooking at
the camp fire, and I could smell the
balsam boughs they slept on, on the
ground. :.
When he let up little on his talk,
l braced up and asked him if he had
rather shoot wild cats and bears than
be- president. He hedged and said both
occupations worked pretty well togeth-
or and he had enjoyed 'em both. Then
! asked him il he was going to run for
president again, and he winked at his
wife, and then he asked ME what made
me ask the question. I told him pa
wanted me to find QUIT told him all
the boys wanted him to run. cause The
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1906-03-07
|, was l good Teller, md not AFRAID 81

y, was good Teller. md not afraid 81
the cars. - = ><"*.
1.-The president laughed and said:.
s''*Well,| it's this way. The president
business is good deal like bear hunt
ing. You get on fresh track, either
in politics or bear hunting, and follow
the game with dogs, or politicians, as
the case may be. The trail keeps get
ting fresher and by and by the game
is in sight, and the dogs are nipping
its hind legs, II it is bear, or chew
ing big words if it is an opposing can
didate, and nipping him in exposed
places. You ride like mad, your clothes
or your reputation torn by briars If it is
a bear, or by opposition newspapers if
tits political campaign, and you
wish it was over, many times, and are
SO tired you wish you were dead.
Finally your bear or your opponent in
politics is freed and the dogs are try
ing to climb the tree, and your bear
or your political opponent is up on
limb snarling and showing his teeth
at the dogs or the politicians, and then
you ride up, look the ground over, wait
till your heart stops beating and fire
the shot at a vital part, and your bear
or your political opponent comes tum-
bling to the ground When he ceases
TO kick you put your foot on his neck
and feel sorry you killed him, but you
go to work and skin him and hang his
hide on the fence. Then you have got
to ride all night to get to camp, if it is
a bear, and work harder than a man on
a treadmill for four years, If it is a
presidential candidate you have skun."
I had sat with my mouth open while
the president talked, and never said a
word, but when he quit said: Eyes,
but suppose when you got your bear
skun, another bear should come after
you, and dare you to knock chip of
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1906-03-07
.(Copyrightedl
Oily Learns Of Law and lawyer

Dear Uncle" cried little billy, care
fully wiping his gold-rimmed glasses
with the ears of the daschund, pray
tell me what is the law?''
The law. my dear nephew" queried
Uncle George nervously, as he clutched
the Angora Kitten by the back of the
neck and deposited it in the waste
basket. ''The law, did l understand
you tc say? But of course l did. All,
Dilly, you have alighted upon a SUBJ
ject Of which much may be said; you
have in fact touched upon a query that
has teen plaguing mankind these
many centuries, yet will do my poor
best to cope with the query. To begin
with, my boy, 1 may say at once that
law IS exactly what Gen. Sherman said
war was. In another breath l may tell
you that it is the only sure road to the
presidency, and also to jail When the
parents Of likely youth discover that
his tastes lie in other directions, for
the ministry or medicine, or bridge
building, Or horse shoeing, they select
for him the noble profession Of the
law, confident in the knowledge that in
the end he will wind up in one or the
other of the two positions 1 have
named. The law is synonymous with
delay. It is also corrolary of ease
and perfect rest for some, and bitter
strife and bald heads for others. If a
man be strenuous with yearning for
constant change he turns to criminal
law and he gets it. If he be rostful
and predisposed to slumber he seeks
pull that will land him on the judi
cial bench. In either case he is likely
to fall foul of trouble. but in one case
the calm judicial mind bids him pass it
over, and in the other the hustling at
mosphere of criminality in which he
has been delving bids him take his
medicine coolly. AS one of our emf
nent financiers has said billy, the
law was made for slaves and he
proved it.. The law originally was in
tended as a safeguard for the citizen,
but somehow that intention got side
tracked and stopped off at a water
tank, for it has become something
otherwise. Would you steal a railroad,
my dear boy? Then set smart law
yer to help you. Are you a woman
with grievance that demands you
shoot up Il bookmaker? Get a lawyer
first and he will tell you how to do It
without danger. In fact, Dilly, smart
lawyer will take a contract to do any
thing for you, Or to enable you to do
anything, and will guarantee you get
off,
|'But dear Uncle, was not the law in
tended to punish wrongdoers?" queried
Little billy.
THAT is an old and time worn. inter-
pretatlon," said Uncle George. 1T is
not so now. 1t has been turned about
and reconstructed and now is intended
to protect the wrongdoers and make
the innocent and harmless look like a
plugged dime in the United States
treasury. Would you live to hale old
age, Dilly, surrounded by every COM
fort? Go you out and shoot up a
friend or two, or administer some deli
cate and subtle poison to him in cup
of coffee. First. however, having Sc
cured several able bodied, tackling.
catch-as catch-can lawyers. When all
your friends are dead and forgotten, or
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1906-03-07
CHAPTER II.
AT The GREEN PILLAR

AT THE GREEN PILLAR. -.
Cocheforet lies in q billowy land of
oak and beech and chestnut "a land Of
Aeep, leafy bottoms, and hills clothed
with forest. Ridge and valley, glen
and knoll. the woodland, sparsely peo.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1906-03-07
Where You're Most Likely to Be Hurt

Where You're Most Likely to Be Hurt
Twelve per cent. of all the acct
dents to people in cities happen on the
streets. Statistics show that the aver
age citizen, if he should meet with
100 serious mischances on his walks
abroad, would slip on the ice, and fall
down under other circumstances, Sc
times; he would get hurt ten times in
boarding or dismounting from cars; he
would be knocked down, or otherwise
injured, by horses and wagons six
times; he would be bitten by dogs four
times, and he would step disastrously
upon banana-peels twice. The remain
ing mishaps would be miscellaneous.
and might include one or two col.
lisions with motor cars, which have
taken the place Of bicycles as perils
to the pedestrian.-Pearson's Mara
zine..a =: -
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1906-03-07
NJ = :
PECK I J; ]! !: S !; BAD
B or W It'll |
THE CIRCUS
By HON. GEORGE W. PECK
Author 0" Peck's Bad Boy Abroad" Etc.
\ "A G.
By HON. GEORGE ". PECK
Copyright by ]. B. Bow!es.)

The Bad Boy and the Senator's Son
Go on an Elephant Cause.-The SEN
ator's Son Gets His Friend a Bid to
Dinner at the White House-The
Trained Seal Swallows an Alarm
Clock. ,..
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1906-03-07
&ffnrnt mauf Agatnat
Graft Gnmtr tu Sta11
BY HON. JOSEPH w. FOLK.
Governor of Missouri.

moral wave is sweeping this country that is
analogous to the spiritual which in the
coming of Christ, and that will not subsdc until graft
in all its forms is swept away. Before Christ came
religion was thing Of forms, 1feless. He gave it
beating heart and aroused it to life. In the place
of intellectual mysticism. He taught the simple
truths of morality which appealing to the hearts
and consicences of the American people with much
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1906-03-07

out of the tank and began 10 prance
around the crowd soaring the women.
and making all the animals nervous.
He stood on his head and beloved,
and all the circus hands came rushing
up. Finally the alarm clock quit ling
ling, and they caught the seal and
pulled the clock off his tooth, and just
then pa came up to me, and said:
What deviltry you boys up to now?
Suppose that seal had swallowed that
clock, and you couldn't wind it up; it
might kill him. Now, go to the car,
cause we are going to get out of this
town right off. You make me tired
And pa helped to lit the slippery seal
into the tank, and looked mad st his
little boy, and hurt the feelings of the
senator's boy.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1906-03-07

Pattern No. 5472.-A very popular
model for a skirt is here shown in a
development of dark blue mohair, al
though all the seasons materials are
suitable. 1t is shaped by thirteen
cores, which provide for graceful
amount of fullness at the lower edge.
while the upper part fits closely about
the hips. Taffeta canvas, yelling and
linen will all be adaptable to the
mode. The medium size will require
SIS yards of 44-inch material. Sizes
for TO- %, Fl, rs, 20, so and % inches
waist measure
This pattern will be sent to you on
receipt Of 10 cents. Address all orders
tothe Pattern Department of thispaper.
Be sure to give size and number OF pat
tern wanted. For convenience. write
your order on the following coupon:
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1906-03-07

Pattern No. 5538.-A simple and be-
coming negligee is one of the most neces-
sary OF garments, and should be includ-
ed in every woman's wardrobe. A pr;tc-
tical design is here shown developed in
blue French flannel, trimmed with
lace. Tucks in the upper part OF the
front give a graceful amount Of full
ness. The back is fitted into the fig
ure. The sleeves may be in bell shape
or gathered into band. Silk, pongee.
cashmere, albatross and challis are AL
suitable. The medium size will require
three and seven-eighths yards of 36-inch
material. Sizes for 30, "a, Sc, 50, 40 ami
~ inches bust measure.
This pattern will be sent to you on
receipt of 10 cents. Address all orders
to the Pattern Department of thispaper.
Be sure to give size and number of pat
tern wanted. For convenience, write
your order on the following coupon:
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1906-03-07
Slow Travel.

I j ss>>.sss1 %,.a@::. Slow. Travel. ~ - =.
Few Russian trains travel at faster
rate than % miles an hour. sz
The Globe-republican. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1889-1910, 1906-05-03
JEALOUSY GUARDS A SECRET.
New York Wife Becoming an Adept
at Discrimination.

at DISSimuldtion.
The vanity of women often leads
them to do curious things says a
writer in the New York Press. There
Is Fifth avenue dentist who has a
high class clientele, including mar
ried woman of rare beauty and still
young whose upper teeth are false
They carry gold filling, which fur
ther stimulates their character as the
original set by being in evidence.
The woman's husband is entirely
unaware that her teeth are false, and
her life has one important object in
view-to keep him in ignorance Of the
fact. AS accidents may happen to
the false set, she keeps duplicate Of
them at the dentists. When, as occa.
sionally happens, this takes place she
flies to the dentist in her automobile
and effects the exchange. So guarded
Is she that she will not have the ex-
ira set in the house where her husband
might accidentally find them. They
have been married twelve years and
he is still In ignorance of the harmless
secret she has guarded SO scrupu-
lousy.
But suppose the secret we're really
important, or her future life should
include one that was serious, what a
school Of discrimination she would
have been graduated from!
The Globe-republican. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1889-1910, 1906-05-03
Letter to Mr., Lou Pettijohn, Dodge
City, Kansas

Letter to Mr., Lou Pettijohn, Dodge
City, Kansas.
Dear Sir: You ask how many square
feet gallon will cover. Depends on
condition of building
There is great deal of lying on this
point. The stock claim of y ing paints Is
300 square feet, two coats. It's a lie, as
q rule.
Devoe covers 300 to 500, our agents
think. We think 300 too low and 500 too
high; though doubtless, they both occur.
How much the other paints cover Is
equally doubtful; we guess 100 to 400.
The truth Is found In another COMPARE
son. Drvoe is all paint, true paint. strong
paint, and full-measure; the others in
general are, ct the best, diluted, adnlter-
aled and short. neasure. They cover ac-
cordipg to body and measure. You can't
paint with clay lime chalk sand barytes
water or air--no body 10 them. Go by
Deyoe.
Yours truly
+. W. DEvoE & Co.
New York, Chicago and Kansas City
P. =. --slurgeon Bros. Lumber Yard sells
our paint.
The Globe-republican. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1889-1910, 1906-05-03
Fortunate MIssourians..

"When / was druggist, at Livonia,
Mo. n writes T. j. Dryer. now Of Grass-
vile, Mo-, "three Of my customers were
permanently cured Of consumption BY
tpr. Kings New Discovery, and are well,
and strong today. One WAS trying to sell
his property and move to Arlzona, bit
after using New Discovery short time
he found II unnecessary 70 dose Iregard
Dr. Kings New Discovery az The most
wonderful medicine in existence " Bur-
eat Cough and Cold cure and Throat and
LING healer Guaranteed by Rath q
BaInbridpe, Druggist. 500 and VI. Trial
bottle free.
The Globe-republican. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1889-1910, 1906-05-03
Rates Grand Chapter

Annual meeting Grand Chapter Of
Kansas Order Of the Eastern Star at
Wichita. May and 10. 1916
The rate to ihis meeting will b. one
fare plns fifsy cents from polp'rin Kan.
sas ID Wicbita and return Escnlsion
ticket viii he cold M, 1910 inclusive.
limited to return Nav 70 fIlls ystA Il
open 10 all. FOR further inferaNttan call
ii IKE santa Fa ticket atIice RIO
Gardner, Agent
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1906-08-24
TELEPHONE GIRLS STRIKE
eEvEN THOUSAND INSTRUMENTS
IN cAlcAeo's BUSINESS Dis
TRlCT USELESS.

Chicago, Aug. 24.-Two hundred tel
ephone girls employed in the central
exchange Of the Chicago Telephone
company struck during the day. badly
crippling the service. The cause of
the strike was an order issued by the
company directing the girls to enter
the building through rear door,
which, in order to reach, they were
compelled to go through a passage
way 100 feet long. The girls declared
that the passageway is muddy even In
the daytime and dark, Shiny and slip
perry at night. There are three saloon
entrances on the alley and the girls
declare that they are annoyed by loi-
terers about these places.
A demand that the order relating to
the rear door be changed was refused
by the company and the girls struck
after a stormy meeting.
One hundred and fifty other girls
struck within an hour after the first
strike, making total of $50 who went
out. Seven thousand telephones in the
business district were put out of COM
mission
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1906-08-24
ROSTER OF coNGREssMEN.
Gompers Preparing "Honor Roll" ane
"BIackIist."

T. oIdCNIISts
Washington, Aug. 24.-In the next
Issue of the American Federationist
President Gompers of the American
Federation of Labor will publish a
list of Western congressman whom he
will put either on an "honor rolf or
on a blacklist" according to their at
tftude on certain questions in which
organized labor is interested.
Recently President Gompers sent
out a circular letter to all senators
and members demanding to know
their attitude on the questions dis
cussed in the "bill of grievances" pre-
sented to President Roosevelt at the
last session of congress.
Replies are being received from
senators and congressman and Com
pers is marking them as either for or
against the interests of organized Ia
Dor.
The publication of the list is to be
an important step in connection with
the entry of labor into politics. The
September issue of the Federationist
will contain 1923 of the replies received
by President Gompers from senators
and congressman. This will be fol-
lowed up by another batch in October.
All members who fail to reply will
be blacklisted, so by the time the cam
paign wakes hot the Federation will
be in the field with a complete roster
of congress, each member marked 20.
K" or hostile" as the case may be.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1906-08-24
MANY GRAVES WASHED OUT.
DELuoE EXPOSES SEVERAL HUN.
DRIED BODIES IN KANSAS
CITY CEMETERY.

Kansas City, Aug. PA terrific
rain storm prevailed in Kansas City
and vicinity early In the day, causing
more or less serious damage In Kan
sas City 500 inches of water fell, a
record for the time, three hours and a
half. Low lying lands were flooded
and the police and fire departments
We're called upon to rescue persons
from Easements in Little Italy, in the
north end of town, and in the east and
west bottoms, where the water en-.
tered many small houses. Several
down town easements were flooded
and goods damaged.
At Elmwood cemetery, five miles
east of the business district, serious
damage was DONE Practically the en-.
tire cemetery grounds were flooded
and In the lower grounds strong cur
rent was formed This resulted in the
washing out of dozens of graves. At
least 200 bodies were exposed. Monu.
ments We're wrecked and other dam.
age DONE ...
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1906-08-24
CLAIMS TO Be SANE NOW
rHAW's DEFENSE WILL BE EMO.
TioNAL INSANITY AT TIME
D OF WHITES MURDER.

New York, Aug. 2ss.-A decision has
been reached by the attorneys for
Harry K. Thaw that Thaw's defense
to the charge OF killing Stanford
White will be plea Of emotional In
sanity. This will include as part OF
the defense the declaration that
ThaW's insanity existed only until
after White was killed and that Thaw
Is now sane again and has been since
the killing.
The decision to make this plea was
reached after the reports of two alien
lists who visited Thaw in the Tombs
Tuesday had been communicated to
Clifford w. Hartridge, of Thaw's coun-
sci.
It was decided also that Mrs. Harry
K. ThaW will be the chief witness Of
the defense in it's effort to prove that
Thaw was insane when he killed
White.
1t was overlthe question whether a
plea of insanity should be made that
Thaw and his former counsel dis
agreed, resulting in the dismissal Of
the lawyers. The plea insisted upon
by Thaw's former counsel included the
admission that he is now insane and
If accepted by the court and jury
would have caused his confinement in
an insane asylum The plea now de-
cided upon makes no such admission.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1906-08-24
ALL THE CEMETERIES At vALPA.
RAlso DESTROYED az LATE
EARTHQUAKE.
Aoasuts FILLED WITH THE DEAD
FEARED EPIDEMIC WILL RESULT
AND MANY FAMILIES ARE
LEAVING CITY.

Valparaiso, Chile, Aug. 24.-Some
OF the business houses have reopened
for the first time since the earthquake.
The city Is still under martial law.
Traffic ceases at 6 o'clock in the even
Ing and everybody is compelled to
take some part In the work of restOr-
Ing normal conditions.
One of the greatest difficulties en-
countered by the authorities is the in
terment Of the bodies recovered from
the ruins, as all the cemeteries were
destroyed. At the various temporary
morgues heaps of collins have accumu-
lated, awaiting the designation of
their place of burial The work of re-
covering the bodies is being pushed to
the utmost in order to avoid an cpl
demic, in fear of which many families
are leaving the city. Through the
whole length of Brazil avenue and all
over Victoria square large sheds have
been constructed to shelter the home
less from the severe rains.
kAA Iu0 provinces VI IuC 4\OACA anu
South which have not suffered from
the earthquake are sending supplies
of food and money to the stricken
cities and towns.
The department of public works at
Santiago has appropriated 100000
for the construction of sheds to shell
ter the refugees from Valparaiso and
elsewhere, who continue to arrive at
the Chilean capital in large numbers.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1906-08-24
BRIEF BITS OF NEWS.

: i g. - ! ( p Z - ~ +. - :
Edward Mcmahon, the first city
comptroller of Superior, Wis, is dead,
aged seventy-four years.
The suspension of the firm of Frank
lin & Billion, members of the New
York Consolidated Stock Exchange, is
announced
A cable dispatch to the Japanese
embassy at London explains that Port
Dalny will be open to the commerce
of all nations from Sept 1.
The San Francisco relief committee
has announced that after Aug. Is no
more provisions will be supplied to
refugees that are ablebodied.
Filming of employees as means of
enforcing discipline in the postal serv-
Ice, a system that has been in opera
ton for many years, is to be abolished.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1906-08-24
cONCEALING TRUE CONDITIONS.
Strict Censorship of Press Dispatches
From the Caucasus.

Strict Censorship Of Press Dispatches
From the Caucasus.
st. Petersburg. Aug. 24.-The Asso-
ciated Press learns by mail that the
strictest censorship is now exercised
over press dispatches in the Caucasus
to conceal the true state of affairs,
both regarding the true inwardness of
the Tartar-Armenian warfare and the
fermentation among the Russian troops
in the garrisoned towns Of Transcau-
casia. The correspondent Of the Asso-
ciated Press was not permitted to tele-
graph certain items of news and in
other cases the censor would only &C.
cept his dispatches when supported by
the official version of the affairs they
reported.
The Armenian-Tartar situation is
worse than is known to the outside
world. Almost all the Russian mill
tary units are disaffected and even the
Cossacks are rebelling against doing
police duty. The latest mutiny is that
of the Poltava Cossacks, who several
days ago, at Tiflis, formally demanded
to be relieved from police duty and
asked for the discharge of those who
had served over three years. The en-.
tire regiment was disarmed and con-
fined in their barracks under guard.
A secret meeting of about 200 SOL
diers, including representatives of
some Of the guard regiments, has been
held In the woods near their camp at
krasnoyeSelo. 1t is reported that a
large portion of the men were shown
to be in thorough sympathy with the
cause of the people and would refuse
to fire on them when ordered to do so,
but 1t was also determined that the
time was not ripe for a general mu-
tiny, as the majority of the troops at
the capital were still nominally loyal.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1906-08-24
GERMAN MARINES LANDED.
Will Protect Lives Of Sub ects at Val.
paraiso.

Will Protect Lives Of Subjects at Val.
paraiso.
Berlin, Aug. 24.-The German gov
eminent has issued the following
statement:
Official reports from Valparaiso
unfortunately confirm the almost total
destruction of that city. The German
consulate general with it's archives
was destroyed, but nobody was hurt.
The other Germans in Valparaiso are
in the greatest danger through fire
and plundering. Upon their wish,
which the consul general forwarded
to the German charge d'affaires in
Santiago, an understanding has been
reached with the government of Chile
by which the German cruiser Fake
will land a detachment of sailors and
marines to protect the lives and prop
erty of German subjects at Val
paraisO."