The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1906-04-26
7RIsTLES.

nay ANbdf ~
--hr. Tslf.efas-HeIy, rex we're
iAlsars 10 rear sse~g lssi EAxht BsSry--
pxfss@ me io' iss~fspssns yes.
--ros ssrsay sssr meet shsz socially
on, ~. oniy 10 ksvss good tAns. yes
hrgv.
-MsGssns- ~ viss ssys sn oss mas
In . iho1ssna. Bsxxiss--Gssi What .
hetsssss nasorliy.
--whs. 10 bsroips. Elsis xsks1 The
tssetsr If . sraIl pxpsi. Asy ~onsn Wis
10 nArse1, nsnms Ays, snsversd Eisis,
Mrs BrovE-ii dssnf taxa much "a
risass he ehiidfss. Mrs. Jopss-ss, esi
" ,Ahss sscd seal 10 hssp them pleased
--Cssald-My father fell u AssisiAn
CsrsldlEs--And Thea, l suppress, be sos ~
ssd ran Tor al b. vss worth.
--Muased ycsos ands the naehise -
Say. BIZ, bach be-, Up . little, viii yer
Bill what's lhs mAtasf' ny face u
caught 10 The uorts.
she s<siinsntslly-I,ove wsns all or
neihinS. ns--Ibes iu attachment 10 not
% eysciing ~ . shsfifrs. for he'll take
what be can Get.
-YA'As, sur, wben All skinned nah cards
~ sssn dem 10 aes1 All raised de- opener.
A. vol did be d. Dsn be opened Dc
razor
Sunday school TeAchsr--lf angry with
smother iitls boy, what should yoa do be
fore speaking. Tommy Toumy-sli on
bim and then count hundred.
Mamma, said little Elmer, den,
think ought 10 study 'nthmetic. Why
not, dear Cause, explained Elmer, III
full OF horrible examples.
"A man never fully appreciates the
pleasures Of life I'll be gsss married. That's
90. Before that be lust takss them ~ I
matter Of course.
--Ganssr--T They say this book entitled
"A Step backward" WAS Inspired. ] won
der where the author ever got bis inspirA'
ton Guyer--oh, guess be watched
woman stepping ~ = street car.
--Teacher--- Here's little sum In I'D
dition for you. II your father gave ysu
ten cents and your mother gave you Ave
what would you then have ! Jlmmy-rd
have hl.
Little four-year. old Mabel, who had
become tired Of fat life, climbed On her
fathers knee the other evening and said
Paps, do wish you would save soms
money and buy Us back yard.
Howell Rowsll 10 always borrowing
trouble. PowelI--Y Yes; he's the kiDd Of
fellow who, II be thought be was going te
r., fat, would 10 out and walk Oh ths
weight before he got 1t.
- think Mr.. GAddis wants to surprise
you with birthday gift seon. remarked
Miss chellus. Indeed replied Miss ED
er Why He asksk me II knew whsI
your thirty NTH birthday would DO.
Madam, said the master Of the HOUSE
ssthoritively, whes put my fsot down y
stays there. But the little tack on which
BIZ brought 1t down took all the point ou
OF bis illustration.
--Mauds--I felt like ought to cry whel
Jack told me be was going away for
msnth. Clara-well, why didn't you
Maude-- Because didn't have nv water
prosf complexion on.
--hs--Can you explain 10 me the diner
snce between shall and will 7 For example
III Lay, win you marry me should yo'
reply, / shall or ! will She coldly-l
should reply, | won't.
So Miss Chatters called to see you tn
other day. ! dont suppose ysu got
chance TO open your mouth Oh, yes, 81
most continuously. You didi Yes
yawnisg; but she never took the hint.
--Yes, said the summer man o. 1909
She said shs loved me with oil her heart
Huh | snorted his friend. Apparently yo'
don't keep posted upon surgical matters
DO you not know that her heart was re
moved this spring.
The lion--ney, whore are you goini
In such = hurry The stsg--Oh. jus
travelling for my health Why = Thu
isn--well. my friend Lee invited me to
stag dinner party today, AID l was JUS
wondering II you were the party.
Little Eisle-- What DO they call th'
nan whs goes around looking for peopl'
Who dos1 pay enough .axes : Small ii
nsr--A tsxideruist, l guess. Little Elsl'
why 10 be called that Small Elmsr-
Papa says he skins everybody, 90 s'pos'
that's why.
"A lawyer WAS taking Of Elihu Root
legal tslsnt. He sbone In . courtroom
said the lawyer. Prem the segirsinG o.
his career he shone. He had . gift o
hsmor too. One day he was cross exam
ming q young woman. How old ara you
he said. The young woman hssiiated
Doet nesltete, eat9 MI hoet Auo 'o"eS
yos hesitate the older you'll grow.
II Lopdsn actor tells hsw he encs re
BAKED the little maid Of oil WORK for be-
incsmpssence. Look Of the smudgs On th
tAbiecloih. Look At the fireplace and th
windows. This won't do 1t oil. You VII
have 70 leave. Asd then what will happei
V ysui Ths poor little slavsy replied
Well, cir, II the worst comes 10 the worst
Ishall 70 on the styKe
The widow--Sow, sittin' right dew
tsh cold hahd facis, Nose, What am ~
prospecsi Ihs suitor-A Nah dea, IL 90
COED Job n manager oh . laundry y
sight. The vidsw-Well, 20 want Tel
III DAT on, Oh sight an fo'eis Il. Nah la
hasband had dat zane hailucirstion, hu
a lAdy Who promised tsh Tub, hcpsh n
sbsy him pos'tively refused tsh be Do laas