Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1906-12-01
Mr.. MORGAN'S TOMBSTONE.

Il borrered some tools from pore
workin' man, which is a pal of mine, an
direckly / started with 'em | found /
remembered me old talent quite nat'ral,
an tell YER Clipped that piece O.
washstand down into one o. the prettiest
little tombstones you ever set eyes on.
Not big enough for a adult, mind yer,
hut it was plenty big enough for young
] juveniles or dumb pet animals, an /
reckoned it was worth harf-a-crown of
anybody's brass, an five bob if | spotted
he right party.
'Still, it was no co. an when | called
at one house an persuaded the CELL to 90
in an tell the naster that it looked good
an he could have it cheap, he come out
to see it for hisself, an was regular
angry.
"A large, stout man he was, with rich
brown hair an lovely brown beard, an
he stares at it fierce an says, Go away
he says, an be ashamed of yerself.
You've no right to come badgerin' re-
spectacle people to buy such things-it's
scandalous!' he says. If we don't put
our foot down we shall have some of yer
hawkin' cheap corins, he says an so
lie works hisself up indignant, an says
J it's an outrage ON public decency, an
'Nay didn't | do some honest labor, in
ead OF maxim meself nuisance an in
sultin' him an his neighbors an wound
in their feelin's with a tombstone. an
didn't seem as if he ever meant to stop
an let me get word in; so l sort Of
sneaked off with me tail between me legs,
an LETT HIM lii the middle of it.
| was upI'VO1Is al out "a lin anywhere
but | didn't want to waste it. so l give
self help another trial an started on the
door to- door trick agen when ] was safe
round the cotner, an at one o. the houses
there | struck a bit o. fust-c class, eight
een-karae luck.
Il was arstin the CELL at the door to
go in an tell the missis I'd got some
thin special to show her which she might
like to See when the gent comes home
from the city, an. shakin' his head at me
on the steps, says, go away he says;
we don't want no bootlaces here he
says; we've all got button boots in this
house an shant never wear no Others
in lartin' sort o way he chucks me
a copper an was wavin' me orr when
suddenly he stops short an arsts, What's
that under yer arm?' he says. Pic
tures?'
so with him tryin' to be funny, |
undid the brown paper an let him have
a look at it.
"Fust he seems disappointed, as if he'd
expected somethin' quite different. Then
he brightens up, an | never seen a man
so tickled in all me life, didn't. He left
orr shakin' his head an GRIMM quiet,
starts chucklin' loud, slaps his leg excited.
goes on chucklin' fit to bust hisself, am
keeps on sayin' thoughtful. The very
thing! Blowed if l don't do it! What a
lark Then he says to me. Now, what's
the lowest price of it. eh? Don't you put
it on too thick, an | don't mind havin'
1t just to encourage honest industry, an
might be able to use it as a luggage
label he says, 'or a table mat
ITS a lovely piece of solid marble.
sir tells him. AN the tombstone is done
in the best style. an you'd never feel
ashamed of it. It's worth harf a-sov-
ereign of any gents money. but to be on
the safe side. suppose we put it at seven
= an six?
,, He thought five shillings would be
safer. so | let it go at that.
, About a month arter that, when |
> was loafn' casual through the same
: neighborhood. l was parssin' the house of
/ that large old gent with the rich brown
Is hair an beard | told yer about. an not
thinkin of him. when he comes tearin'
[ out after me an lays hold o. my arm.
l 81 bin lookin' for YOU. my man. he
: says, vicious like. You come on indoors
: with me; there's .s6methin' / want TO arst
; You about, an if You has any fuss am
p nonsense and won't come quietly I'll hand
You over to the pleece instead, without
1 givin' you no chance to clear YOURSELF
? II amt 20 no more o them tomb.
3, stones, sin | says humble; L give that
: line up for good, like you told me to-
Never mind about that he snaps.
1 amt arstn' YOU for no tombstones
/, I'll tell YOU what / wants of You pres.
entity
Course, ! went quiet. Id never done
nothin' to him. and I fancied there might
be little brass haugin' to it, He vas
: that fierce an savage | couldn't think
a what ia done to upset him. If Id mur
' dered relative of his purpose to make
a customer for the tombstone. he couldn't
: ha' seemed more suspicious an angry.
! "l!oWeVer neither of us said no more
I TIL he'd let lis in with his latchkev.
p shoVes me into the front parler an locks
- the door
"NSAia " ittt HtlNouS WneN ! seen
e him do that. Started me wonderin, =
anythin' was the matter with hin, Rn+
| didn't see why he should owe me a
grudge. and he seemed harmless in =
manner of speakin'. if he hadn't brea tbaJ
so hard and glared so wild. an I stood
4 an waited while he goes to a cunhooyJ
and tetches out my tombstone and stands
p it up on chair
You reekenise thatg' he saws.
There was more writin ON II thu,
there was when l sold it. All I'd cnt
laA BACKED out on it was Sacred to the