davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13
WHEN HOGS WENT DOWN.
Error That Made Surprising Differ
ence in the Load.

On "circus day" in a small Okla.
homa city, a local hog buyer took ad-
vantage of the large crowds to manip.
ulate the hog market by means of his
scales and large supply OF red
eye 1t was the custom for a farmer
with load of hogs to drive on the
scales, be weighed, unload and return
to be weighed again with the wagon.
The first to come was a farmer with
a large load of hogs. The next wagon
had only one small hog. When 1t had
passed on to unload, the buyer "ad.
justed" the scales for farmer No. 1,
but No. 2, having the smaller load.
got back first, and. on being weighed
empty. his wagon weighed 25 pounds
more than with the hog The farmer
was somewhat perplexed and said:
Mr.. Buyer, II seems that owe you
25 pounds Of hog. am sorry that
haven't another one with me, but II
you can wait until next week I will
bring one in"
The dealer settled the difference"
with due celerity.-Judge.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13


He was a solemn Scotchman with an
equally solemn and somewhat down.
trodden wife. The fact that they were
receiving an excellent price for their
second pair front" from an American
lodger did not blind them to her fail.
fngs.
Dear me, Mr.. Macleod" said the
lodser one Sunday afternoon when an
errand took her to the parlor where
the family sat, Il should think you
and your wife would be stifled sit.
ting indoors this hot day with the win.
dows shut. If you'd just open one and
get some fresh air I'm sure It would
do Mrs. Macleod good she looks
pale"
Mr.. Macleod loked at her with his
usual stern and unbending gaze.
I'VE can hae fresh aid ony day." he
said calmly. We've no need to hae IL
rushing aboot the house on the Saw.
bath. Companion.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13
CRITIC MAY BE FOOLED.
Alexander Pope Showed It in Days
Of Old.

What can be more mirth-provoking
than the naive simplicity with which
a pompous critic who prides himself
on his lynx.eyed acuteness. will some.
times walk into a trap that has been
set for him? When Alexander Pope
was translating Homer, he read, by
request, several books of the "Iliad"
to Lord Halifax-whom he character.
lies as a literary coxcomb-at his
house. During the reading his lord
ship several times stopped the poet
and suggested that certain passages
might be improved. Perplexed and
irritated by the advice, the poet with.
drew with Garth, who laughed heartily
at the incident, and told him to leave
the verses Just as they were-to call
on Halifax a month later, thank him
for his criticisms. and then read again
the verses to him unaltered Pope
followed this advice. saying to Hall.
fax that he hoped his lordship would
now find his objections removed
upon which Halifax, delighted, cried
out: "Ay, now they are perfectly
right; nothing could be better."-
Success.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13
e~erereens Need Protection,

. All evergreens suffer in winter from
warm weather and drying winds,
which cause their leaves to evaporate
moisture faster than it can be supplied
by the roots, which may be In frozen
ground. The yellow color OF ever.
green's in winter Is usually a sign Of
distress, and bronzing is a sign of i'm
perfect hardness or OF willingness 10
drop the leaves for a while in order
to withstand the winter. The best
way to protect rare and costly ever
green's Is to plant them behind a
wlndbreak or amid group of other
trees, The prevailing winter wind is
rsually from the northwest. All conf
!ers whether hardy or not. are glad
. he mulcted with eight or ten inches
II leaves or coarse manure.-Garden
.agaZine D.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13
Rare Antiuuarian Find.

An unusual type of Roman villa has
been unearthed on the site of the an
cient Roman encampment In Britain
at Caerwent. The remains have been
found to be in an excellent state of
preservation. A departure from the
conventional practice of the Romans
in the designs OF their residences, as
revealed by previous excavations In
that country, is the provision of extra
rooms abutting on the four sides of
the courtyard. IN the easements two
completely perfect heating devices or
hypocausts were found, together with
the peculiar blue tiles utilized by the
owners for conducting the heat from
the stove IN the basement and radiat.
ing It through the upper rooms of the
dwelling. In the basement some ex-
quisite specimens of Roman paving
were unearthed.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13
All Red,

A West Philadelphia youth was be,
Ing taught the festive game OF poker
the other night. and after the relative
value of pairs, threes, flushes and
straights had been explained to him
play was started, After half an hour
or so he surprised the others in the
game by asking; What is It chen
all the cards are of the same color?'
"A flush," was the reply. Then I'll
bet six dollars" and, suiting the action
to his words. he threw that amount
into the pot. The others. frightened
by the play. wisely" laid down two
pairs and threes, which were held
against the novice, and he scooped in
the pot, laying face up on the table
three hearts and two diamonds. Dis.
may and further explanations from
his instructors naturally followed
Philadelphia Press.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13

couple of yaps were examining an
automobile standing alongside the
road. One was green and knew It,
and the other was telling him things
about the machine.
What does the '24-H. p mean p"
asked the green one.
That's what mates 'em CO." ex.
planned the ripe one.
How makes em go?"
We'll, II P,' stands for horse now.
der and "a stands for the number of
powders they have to give It to get
II goin' the way 'hey want it to go
See?'
by cracky amt they greatf" com.
mented the sTeen one, happy In his
broadened knowledge
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13
Facts Small But Divertinu.

The Saturday Review never wearies
OF jibes at America. at American mil.
lionaires and canned shoes. Its brains
never refuse to invent epithets for us
not at all smooth and flattering. All
evil practices originate in America.
as the Review sees the world. Is food
adulterated In any country?-if the
importation itself Is not from America.
the idea is. The Cosmopolitan is led
to wonder, then. II the Saturday Re.
view noted In another London print,
~ daily issue. a conversation heard
in the London slums and of this i'm.
port:
Social Worker, visiting home. to
young woman-What do you work at?
Young Woman-I works In a Jam
factory.
What do you do there?"
81 makes the seeds
Make the seeds? What do you
mean?
Il makes the seeds out er wood
The public don't like jam without
seeds. Boston Transcript.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13
Impossible Realism.

A comedian was praising the art OF
Miss Julia Marlowe.
And she is as brilliant as she is
artistic" he said earnestly. "A won.
derful young womanl
DO you remember her impersona.
tion of juliet? A doctor saw her as
Juliet one night in Pittsburg and was
tremendously impressed. Only, in the
powerful death scene, there was one
technical error
Miss Marlowe,' the doctor said at
reception the next day. 4 admired
your Juliet profoundly The imper-
sonation was a work of art. But
pardon NEEDN'T you know that a
corpse doesn't stiffen for at least six
hours after death?
Miss Marlowe answered in the
drawl that she reserves for such
speeches:
Now. doctor, do you think am
go>lg to keep my audiences waiting
six hours to see me stiffen?'"
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13

With Taunton reached at last, in
the gloom of the dusk, came informa-
ton that IL was the terminus; that
two previous trains had been already
stopped there that the wating-rooms
of the station were all blocked by pas
sengers of the less distinguished
classes; and that the entire accom-.
mediation of all the hotels was alb.
sorbed by the suite of a royal person.
age who was himself arrested and
held prisoner.
The violence of the tempest throw
ing, as 1t did, into shade all questions
OF a merely conventional character.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13
THE RACE FOR
SKY MEADOW
BY BAILEY MILLARD
Copyright. by Joseph b. Dowles.J

What do ! think o. women ranch
bosses?" was the wrathful flash OF
Zeke Stubbs, II think they ought To
keep to the kitchen an not go snoop.
in aroun' tellin' growed-up men how
TO take the shoes off'n horses. An
she a 19year-old gall Did she larn
about horses feet at that Salt Lake
seminary? Id like to know! II her
NAV and paw only was alive! Wal
it's them there high.toned boardin'
schools that splles gals every time.
oh, don't take on, Zeke," said Ur!
Wiggin. coming around a corner of
the barn. May Window got a few
extra frills at the seminary. but she
amt spilled. An she knows all about
horses"
Uri was the hired man on the Win.
dom ranch, and zeke was his helper
An she amt so dreadful stuck.
up added Uri "If she was she
wouldn't be a-goin' out with the
sheep"
Coin out with the sheep! Great
snakes! An all alone among them
men? Guess you can count me out
this time. ! don't want no woman
boss Oh the range. The idee! A WON
an sheepherder!"
"She amt a-goin alone" said Uri.
How them"
wal, you know Sandy Baffin's Ger.
tie, that married Russ Bricker? She's
a-goin' along, too. Mays got Russ to
Innk IN o., H..
ties a-goin' to do the cookin."
Russ Bricker had told May Win.
dom that 1t would be race for the
Sky-Meadow country-the best range
In the Wasatch mountains--and she
was intensely eager to get in first
with her band.
She had been out on the range sew
eral times before her father died
once as long as a month. She loved
the Wild life and she loved the sheep.
Above all things, she was eager to
get to the range ahead of Lew Mad.
den. who drove large herd of his
own shearing UP that way every
spring as soon as the season opened.
Lew was Objectionable to her in no
other way than that he had tried
to make himself particularly agree.
able to her. with the result that she
had sent him about his business She
could hardly have told why she had
done this. for Lew was big and strong,
and looked finer in his saddle than
any other man in Juab county. Prob
ably she had refused him because
he had taken her for granted. Being
taken for granted was very odious
to her.
An hour after noon the next day
they were all up on the top of the
divide where watts of fresh. heady
air swept their faces and the sheep
browsed greedily about
But while the mules were being
fed and everybody was eating a hasty,
scrappy luncheon, the handsome Lew
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13

rode coolly into camp and, lifting
his broad sombrero to the ladies'
showed the same unruffied brow and
the same calm blue eyes that May had
seen when he had made such small
account of her irritating little no
Good morning." he said, smiling
so that the perfect white of his teeth
glittered under his blonde mustache.
Pretty rough country for freighting,
eh. Mr.. Bricker"
For q moment nobody said any.
thing. Then Mays hospitable good
nature was shown after a sharp bite
at her under lip.
Aren't you hungry. Mr.. Madden
Won't you have some luncheon?'
20. thanks! yes" He dismounted
and took the sandwich she offered
him.
Where's your sheep?" There was
q brusque note In Russ query.
over there somewhere" he said,
airily. looking up the ridge.
well, you haven't got your sheep
into Sky-Meadow YETI" queried May,
dreading his reply. "You couldn't
have got up there this quick"
The coolness Of this smooth spoken
young man was getting to be little
TOO much for her.
mo. they're not there yet" he said.
Perhaps not yet"
well. then. we'll drive on and head
you of"
"All right. May I use this tin cup
for Q finger bowl?"
Certainly" Then she arose.
"Coo-ee!" she called to her sheep.
Wen run on ahead. Mr.. Bricker. with
Uh and Ring. and you and zsks fol-
low along with the wagon" 49,. =. ~
"shan't help you. Miss windomf''
said Lew II could handle that
bunch over there"
What he meant by this she could
not or would not let herself under
stand. But she thanked him rather
curtly and declined the offer.
He smiled at her confidently as
abs rode away. On what did he base
'his conGdences rts 4f~1 rsxHs3.}
y The spirit Of thsr srsanss, wAs sstr0ns
In Nay. Her blood mounted warmly.
and her horse pressed sharply upon
ths shseR while her voice rang loud
~ 01Mys '.tI . N. | (. M
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13
When Brother Williams Weakened.

Yes. sur" said Brother Williams to
the stranger, de foot OF a graveya'd d
rabbit, kotched In a graveyard, in de
dark er de moon, will sho' bring good
luck ter you! en- dar's de graveyard d,
right over yander, en- de rabblt-he
sho dar fer de ketchinu"
"All right, catch him for me, and
I'll give you ten dollars"
Brother Williams eyed the crisp.
new bill in the strangers hand:
Hit sho' is heap er money" he
said. zen Lawd knows | needs II too
bad ter talk bout; but, come ter study
bout II, dar's so much dark er de
moon in dat graveyard, you can't see
ter ketch rabbit!"-Atlanta Consti.
tuition.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13
QUAINT IDEAS OF CHILDREN.
Collection That Reveals Workings Of
the Youthful Mind.

The late Frederick r. Coudert, the
noted lawyer and wit, had a great
kindness for children. He collected
indefatigably the quaint sayings of
children, and one of the treasures of
his library was a small manuscript
volume filled with definitions that
children had composed. This volume
was called "A Child's Dictionary" and
these are some of the definitions that
Mr.. Coudert would read from the
hook
"Dust-Mud with the Juice squeezed
out of IT,"
Snoring-Letting off Sleep"
"Backbiter-A mosquito"
"Fan-A thing to brush the warm
OF with"
"lce-Water that went to sleep in
the cold"
"Apples-The bubbles that apple
trees blow."-Judge's Magazine of
Fun.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13
In Need Of Another Start.

Stranger-Sir do you remember
giving poor, friendless tramp so
cents one cold night last winter?
Jones-I do!
"Sir. l am that tramp; that SO
cents was the turning point In my
career; with 1t got a shave, shine.
a meal and job saved my money.
went to Alaska, made 100000 and
last week l came back to New York
to share my million with you. But
unfortunately struck Wall street be-
fore ! struck you-and-have you an
other so cents that you could conven.
iently spare. sir?"-Life.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13
uneomplimentarv connariso,

Captain Homer Hedge, the presi.
dent of the Aero club, told at dinner
In New York balloon story.
"A friend of mine," he said, "A
very fat gentleman. in walking along
the street the other day bumped into
a huckster and knocked half dozen
turnips out of the mans hand.
Bad luck to him., said the huck.
ster, scowling at the receding figure
OF my vast friend-'bad luck to him!
And they want to say they've made
balloons dirigible.'"
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13
Misunderstood.

He was in his first week at col
lege, and when he went to the sta
toners to buy a fountain pen, he
felt desirou. that the young woman
who waited on him should know that
In spite Of his youth he was no high
school boy.
When she handed him a sheet OF
paper he wrote on II. with many -four.
lshes, In a large, bold hand: Alma
Mater, Alma Mater" eight or nine
times.
The clerk watched him with a sim.
per, and at last she spoke.
why don't you let her try II her.
SELF she suggested, 'and then If IL
doesn't suit, of course Wen change it,"
Youths Companion.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13
that of chaperon showed no promi.

that OF chaperon showed no promi.
nence.
Miss Muir's what are we going
to do?" though 1t carried to initiated
ears a sound suggestive of a nervous.
ness bravely fought, was accom-.
panied by shrug, affected to dis
claim responsibility. The impersonal
obedience amused and in no way dis
pleased Sir John.
Demurely and dispassionately, as
though the affair was neither interest
nor concern of hers, with all the i'm
posture Of simplicity, she stood aside
and left to him the onus of arrange.
ment. I'VE are still companions in
misery" she reminded him. And ul.
timately an inn gave them harborage.
Miss Muir established herself In
rockingham. The best will In the
world to keep awake was not strong
enough to come of successful in the
conflict with warmth; for her chair,
become its ally, swinging to rhythmic
time. and the combination conquered
her.
Sir John took up his position on the
opposite side of the fire, whence his
romantic vision thrust itself forward
as the lens to be used.
His self-complacent, enviable bach.
elordom, which he had thought as long
ago brought to perfection's point, now
shivered under the featherweight of
Rosa's presence-a little more slim,
1t might be, little more attractive,
certainly, yet not one whose impress
he would have reckoned as likely to
influence, for either good or i'll, the
well-considered structure of his life.
Desire of acquisition gripped his
heart. Ii would be Grass stupidity not
to make the most of this unlooked-for
opportunity, for she might, tomorrow,
go out Of his life as she had gone once
before. The fear became intolerable
and his face took on It an expression
of resolution. He turned to her on
passions nerves.
Rosa"
"Ah!" The woman awoke, moved,
wondering, shy, but completely hap
py. Her eyes were soft with sleep.
John" she murmured. His face,
from the altitude of his 70 inches,
smiled down at her.
You woke me-" she protested, re.
proachful.
mot without good reason"
"No?"
81 wanted to know that you were
real"
Are you sure?"
Sure" She put out hand: "Is
that all?'
mo. had forgotten, all the time
we were together, to ask for where
you are bound"
Falmouth"
Falmouth! Not to my sister's?"
yes ] have always kept up my
friendship with Mary.
Then you knew"
THAT you were to be there? Yes"
"And the train was to go by?" He
could see that her lip quivered.
mo. That was really accident"
He smiled. "A rare thing in the
world Is woman with penetrating
intelligence. Falling In love is no
habit of mine. did 1t once, some
years ago, and the woman-pardon
the descriptive inaccuracy-was a girl
who then did not know her own
mind"
Miss Muir interrupted: "She had
To allow other people to make 1t up
for her"
Sir John dropped upon his knees at
her side.
Now. when Chance throws me with
her again"
Chance! Tent you really under,
stand, John. or is a man with penc.
tratiDg intellig snce the rarest thing In
the world?"
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13
Predlcament of Aoe.

To-day our attitude toward old age
has greatly changed. We no longer
pretend to treat 1t as a hackneyed
joke. but instead have agreed politely
to ignore it. No one is old. simply be-
cause he cannot afford to be.
The kingdom has been given over
to the young, and age must borrow
youths clothing II II would still hold
its own In the council chamber or
the market place.-Gentleman's Maya.
zine.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13

Church--Isee the custom of standing
up when patriotic song is announced
is becoming popular.
Gothman-Yes; think some day I'll
start a patriotic song In crowded
street car and see II can steal seat
In that way.--Yonkers Statesman.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13
Her Word of Honor.

Don't you love me?"
Eyes, dear, but I'm already en-.
gagged"
"Break your engagement"
20. George! That wouldn't be hon.
orable. An engagement is sacred
thing, not lightly to be entered into
or broken off. Resides"
"Well?"
"Well, I'm engaged to two men, and
that makes 1t even worse"
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13

1--WE had a woma, whistler and a
performer on the musical glasses at
at our church last Sunday"
Anything else"
Nothing save the usual monologue
by the psrson. n."-Louisville Courier.
Journal.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13
Permissible.

Sunday School Teacher trust that
all Of you little boys will always tell
only the strict truth.
Young Hopeful--I will. sir. until
get to be an old man. like grandpa"
Sunday School Teacher-But why
should you stop telling the truth then !
Young Hopeful suppose I'll want
to tell about things remember that
happened when was . boy.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13

Consul Evan e. Young reports tha
an Interesting test of the value of the
American drill for sowing wheat, az
compared with the old broadcast
method so common In Asiatic Turkey,
took place this past summer near
Harput.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13
Safe to Love Them Then.

81 like dear little babies before they
have learned to talk-dont you, Mr..
Smythe?"
Indeed ! do. Before they have
learned to talk there Is no danger of
their parents telling you the remark.
able things they have id."-Stray
Stories.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13
Wanted a Little Moon.hio..

His Wife-You used to say I was
the sunshine of your existence.
Her Husband-So l did.
His wife-And now you stay out
night after night
Her Husband-Well, one can't ex.
psst sunshine after dark. you know.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13

The Married One-Oh, we settle our
differences BY arbitration.
The Single One--And who arbi-
The Nsyrlo1 Qns--Qh. & a ~
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13

The strong features of the New
South Wales liquor law is when a
person is found on licensed premises
during prohibited hours he must 90
before the court and prove himself to
be a traveller or regular boarder or
submit to 2 6ne.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13

Father (slnging)-These Ilo years
have ! been waiting in hope that my
wife would give up playing the piano.
Friend-Well, and now.
Father-Now my three daughters
play.-Figaro.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13

"Didn't tell yer that Bill was toe
slow to livep"
Why, wot's e bin and done now!
"He's gone and got run over by a
hearse. Tilt Bits.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1906-12-13

10 the bleak air or his barren poverty!
He had to admit to himself that he
had no grievance even against her
worldly-wise parents.
You were going to say"
THAT | fear the weather is getting
worse, and ought we not to be some
where near Swindon?"
"The weather is certainly getting
worse. but l am not In a position to
be sure about Swindon. II strikes me
that we have embarked upon a jour
ney that has no perceivable end"
"You have" Miss Muir's eyes
wandered to the lunch basket-"with
you most attractive-looking hamper.
The monotony Of life gives way be.
fore an unopened surprise packet"
Il am liberal-minded enough to of.
fer to share"
Perhaps II was the lunch that un.
locked the heart Of him. Before It he
had felt In Miss Muir's presence a
little uncomfortable; but now. looking
at her. she became familiar--own sis
tor as 1t were TO the woman he had
loved. He talked Of interesting, i'm
personal matters, was CHEEKY com.
panion and good-humored, and Miss
Muir responded by listening en-.
couragement.
They condoled with each other-a
sham coincidence. for both were ex-
citedly happy-over the inclement
day Of which. as hour after hour sped
on. the weather became worse and
worse. There 70 something peculiar
ly inspiriting In . rain storm from
which oae y proteotaA
Los Angeles herald., 1906-04-18
IaIs 40 / q o az 6
me out when winning run score
SCORE BY INNINGS:

rhree-base hit-Bornard. rwo-base