Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1906-11-16

Said Mrs. A. to Mrs. B.,
Both on the porch a-rocking.
The goings on of Mrs. &.
10 me are something shocking"
Said Mrs. b. to Mrs. A.,
What has she done that's new, dear
On general principles, of course,
Iqulte agree with you, dear"
So then they took poor Mrs. c.
wish you could have seen EN-
And with great unanimity
Dissected her between 'em
Till Mrs. c. herself arrived.
By doting swains surrounded,
And talked of Mrs. A. and Il.
Till supper summons sounded.
Charity certainly covers q multitude
of sins, but it doesn't remove them.
Here's your fish, it's c. o. d."
"Well you can take it away again.
l ordered salmon"
The booster who always boosts and
the knocker who always knocks are
very tiresome and obnoxious individ.
uals and should be summed by the
rational.
According to the Chicago News the
Chicago street cars are killing too
many people. This is wrong. OF
course. Every corporation should be
careful and not kill more than enough.
Employer: "For lunch you will
have thirty minutes"
O'Connor: "And how will Oi ate
thin, SORT"
Employer: Eat what?"
O'Connor: 9TH t'irty minnets."
The Woman: "And what are these
ropes called?"
The Sailor: "Them's the shrouds,
num-"
The Woman: "How grewsomel /
suppose they are used at the wake Of a
ship"
The Gazette, OF Emporis, Kan, w. A.
White editor, has an iron.clad rule
about printing poetry. No verses of
any sort are ever published in the
Gazette except twice year. In the
Spring "When the Green Gets Back
in the Trees" is published, and in the
Fall, "When the Frost is on the
Pumpkin" Both poems are by James
Whitcomb Riley.
The aide.decsmp rushed uncere.
moniously into the tent of the COM
msnding geneIaless, started to salute,
but wound up in the excitement by
feeling to find if her cap was on
straight. Finding that it was, she
said: Excuse me, generaless, until
l tilt my cap little to one side; that
is the fashion. Then will tell you
the news" Having put the cap at a
right angle on her head. she turned to
the generaless: "The enemy are ad.
vancing by bias and ruflles in force" I"
she said. The generaless looked up
calmly from her embroidery work
"Tell them that am not at home"
she said.
Real estate men in Seattle are max.
ing money, no doubt. Surely, on
second thought, they are. A friend of
mine told me the other day that the
wife of a prominent dealer in Seattle
tide-land and corner lots gave . dinner
party recently in q swell hotel, and
after the ladies returned to the draw.
ing room, ss it were, tho hostess, her
broad expanse tinkling with diamonds,
leaned back in . great tufted chair and
shivered slightly. A servant was sent
in search OF the woman's maid. "Flor.
ence," said the Seattle earth dealers
wife, with languid magnificence, IL
feel chilly, bring me another diamond
necklace"
Judge Frater, OF Seattle, says he will
put a stop to the twenty.minute di.
vorces" now to be obtained in the
Queen City. I have been thinking we
onght to have the divorce law of An.
Glen. Greece, placed on our Washing.
ton statutes. If the old Greek clause
was tackled to every separation, di'
vorces would fall off go to 70 per cent.
1 imagine. This law was that, when
a man got q divorce, he could not un'
der any circumstances marry woman
younger than his ex.wife. How many
divorce suits would be brought if all
husbands knew that after tho separa
ton they could not marry younger
women than the wives they bad casI
off?
Even skipping the rope has become
more complicated. A generation back
when the small schoolgirl ate more
pickles, she was satlehed TO SKIP
single rope. swung by herself or by
two other little girls. And the dif
ferent rates OF speed at which she
could hop were designated "salt.'
pepper" mustard" But now eta
basco" has been added and the gir
who is going to hold her own mus
jump two ropes swinging in opposite
directions at the same time. Most o
them do it, but they don't have con
vulsions or fits OF palpitation of thu
heart which their mothers used t
be told they would have if the,
jumped faster than "pepper."
A Denyer iudge named Palmer hal