The Cairo bulletin., 1906-09-06
Fortune for a
Cat SqueICh0r

! way OF keeping cats from moving dt
1 night. some effective antlcat that any
man could bring into use, in any
nsighborhood, on occasion.
in this advanced age throwing bot
| ties and bootjacks and old shoes at
| the offending cats seems crude ana
| unscientific method and then 1t - IN
| effectual Why, | have known cat
| to be hit square in the midrlh ana
! actually knocked off fence by a large
and heavy and fairly thrown Hessian
| or it might have been Wellington
| boot and not only to escape being
annihilated or even silenced by the
same, but even to emit al the instant
| Of the boots impinging upon it
! shrieks louder than any to which 1t
had given vent before. Recovering
Aself from the ground and scrambling
up on the fence again, It gave forth
long. waving, ear-piercing, blood-cur-
! ding hair-raising screams, to which
! afl previous screams seemed but as
| the gentle murmuring Of lutte
NO You see. the cats have got
7 81 uSCu W bptlo anu bbltitN 'tAib bN'FN
| lacks and bricks--sngular sort Of,
| isn't it, that all the things we throw
ut cats begin with the same letter the
| letter b?' Ever think of that?-have
| got so used to them that they pay no
| attention TO them whatever unless
they are actually hit, and how often
does that happen?
Il forget how many tons of lead 1t
! takes actually to kill a soldier in ba.-
| tie, and the proportion of misses 70
hits is about the same-larger prob.
! ably, really--in throwing things al
cats. Think of the frightful waste Of
ammunition in this warfare and then
consider that in this war on cats when
we do hit the mark it only makes the
cat scream the louder
oh my. no! Bottles, bootiacks,
boots and bricks are more than me.
diaeval, they are positively ancient
and worse than useless as means Of
warfare on howhng cats. True, We
derive q certain satisfaction from
hurting these missiles, but that Is tHc
only result; they do no good, and
what we really want now is some
thing effective.
There is the cat guard. composed
of strips of wood with long, sharp
spikes sticking up through, which wc
nail on the tops Of fences to keep cats
away good thing as far as it goes,
but there's the rub; It doesn't go far
enough We live for year in one
neighborhood where everybody
around puts cat guards on his fences
and where we hear no cats, but then
we may move to some other neighbor
hood where nobody puts up cat guards
and the cats reign supreme.
Il won't attempt to describe TO you
their wild wailinEs and sweeping
screams couldn't, for that matter.
If tried And why should | anyway.
when we--that is To say, the people
living in the block around this range
of back yards-are here to suffer?
When that midnight-or it may be !
or 1880 a. m.--concert begins, the
whole block wakes and shudders and
thep gets mad and some dwellers
there are around that try to stop it
81 hear a window go up somewhere
and | know that somebody is sticking
his head out, and then ! hear him
saving to the cats as fiercely as he
can between his clinched teeth; 'Ssst'
ssss; sssst! but even in my anguish
this always makes me laugh, for you
might as we'll try to stop comet by
sissing at it, and, in fact, think 1t
makes the cats laugh, too.
Then pretty soon, the cats keep
ing on bowling we hear something
slam against the fence with an old
time. familiar clatter-it sounds like
boot or brush or a bottle. thrown
probably by some old man sticking
10 old-time ways, but as far as pro-
ducing results is concerned, IT might
as well have been thrown up in tho
air. And then
Gerzoom!
That sounded as II it might have
lccn a chair or table or even re-
irigerator or something like that for
IL struck the fence with a mighty
crash and shook every cat off to the
ground. and then for a brief space
there Vas silence, but a minute later
they were all up again, screaming
their weird waiing, waving scream
louder than ever.
"And then somewhere down the
hlock-bless you, my brother Id like
TO lnoy YOU and shake you by the
hand-there is a man who fires a gun
it may be only a pistol, but II
sounds like a gun-to brighten the
cats
Its singular about the effect OF
that tun-sometimes the cats only
howl the louder when they hear IL,
hut sometimes at the report they stop.
And that has suggested to my next
door neighbor, a somewhat sanguin-
arv man. that We might rig up gat-
ling gun i'm the yard or mitrailleusc
or something of that sort. where IL
would sweep the fence tops and so
actually rid these yards Of cats for
ever but when we came TO think this
over seriously. rejecting that maybe
the maker of the cannon could give
no guaranty about where the bullet.