davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02
From the Louisville courier-Journal.

From the Louisville Courier-Journal
IN HIS delightful autobiography run
ming through the pages of Col. George
Harvey's North American Review,
Mark Twain is giving a new and orig
inal touch to that form of literature:
but, as he himself admits, he is not
strictly speaking a historian.
For example, in one Of the early num-
bers we read:
''Among the Virginian Clemenses were
Jere (already mentioned) and Sherrard.
Jere Clemens had wide reputation as
a good pistol shot, and once it enabled
him to get on the friendly side of some
drummers when they wouldn't have pad
any attention to mere smooth words and
arguments He was out stumping tho
state at the time. The drummers were
grouped dn front of the stand, and had
been hired by the opposition to drum
while he made his speech. When he was
ready to begin, he got out his revolver
and laid it before him, and said in his
soft, silky way:
81 do not wish to hurt anybody, and
shall try not to; but / have got just
bullet apiece for those six drums, and il
you should want to play on them, don't
stand behind them.
"Sherrard Clemens was a republican
congressman from West Virginia in the
war days, and then went out to st. Louis,
where the James Clemens branch lived,
and still lives, and there he became
warm rebel This was after the war. At
the time that he was a republican I was
a, he ,o1 a
rebel, I was become. temporarily re-
publican. The Clemenses have dlways
done the best they could to keep the po-
litical balances level, no matter how
much it might inconvenience them, did
not know what had become of Sherrard
Clemens; but once I introduced Senator
Hawley to a republican mass meeting IN
New England. and then l got a bitter let
ter from Sherrard from st. Louis. He
said that the republicans of the north
no, the mudslls of the north'-had swept
away the old aristocracy of the south
with fire and sword, and 1t i'll became me,
an aristocrat by blood, to train with thiat
kind of swine. Did l forget that l WAS
a Lambton?
This is interesting, but inexact. Jere
Clemens was not a Nirginian, but an
Alabamian, and Sherrard Clemens was
not " republican congressman from
West Virginia in the war days., but a
democratic congress from Virginia "befo'
de wah" Sherrard antedated the creation
of West Virginia. Disguised by that
very unconstitutional act of Congress, he
went to Missouri, where he died. To the
last he was a Democrat and his rebuke
of his cousin Sam Mark Twain Tor
''consortin' with those mudsils of the
north" was highly characteristic.
But here, in a more recent installment,
is another anachronism.
MY mother knew all about the Glenn
enses of Virginia, and loved TO aggrandize
them to me, but she has long been dead.
There has been no one to keep those de-
tails fresh in my memory, and they nave
grown dim.
..rhere was Jere. Clemens who was a
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02
MARK TWAINS BAD MEMORY

United States senator. and in his day en-
joyed the usual senatorial fame-a fame
which perishes whether it springs from
four-years service or forty. After Jere
Clemens fame as a Senator passed away
he was still remembered for many years
on account of another service which he
performed. He shot old John Browns
Gov. Wise in the hind leg in duel. How
ever, I am not very clear about this. 1t
may be that Gov. Wise shot him in the
hind leg. However, I don't think 1t is
important. l think that the only thing
that is really important is that one OF
them got shot in the hind leg 1t would
have been better aud nobler and more
historical and satisfactory If both Of them
had got shot in the hind leg-but it is Of
no use for me to try to recollect history.
| never had a historical mind. Let 1t go.
Whichever way it happened, l am glad
of it, and that is as much enthusiasm as
l can get Up for person bearing my
name"
1t seems invidious to undertake to con-
Wet historian who so fully confesses
himself in ADVANCED reconteur can never
tell a good story, but some literal donkey
must intqrject his stupid correctons-but
here Mark Twain again mixes those
Clemens babies. 1t was Sherrard
Clemens, not Jere Clemens. who did the
shooting, who had the duel, not with
Henry \. Wise. but with o. Jennings
Wise. Henry AS son, Sherrard being hit
in the hind Leg and famed for life
If Mark Twain wants some one to
edit his copy, and is willing to pass
the coming winter in Spain and Egypt.
and Col. George Harvey will agree to
pay the bills, ION joint account" we
know of a party that will undertake the
job, but not cheap-mind youl-not
cheap, for they do say living is most
expensive and growing dearer and dear
er every season, down-a- bout the Quad
alquivir and the Alhambra and BARGE
Iona, where Ben Ridgeley holds forth,
and UP along the headwarters of the
Nile,
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02
McCIure's Magazine.

Contents of the December MeClure's:
"The Russian Fear Frontspieee; Lit
tie Bo-Peep" Myra Kelly; "Reminis-
censes of Long Life" Carl Schurz; "A
Salutation to Russia Florence Wilkin-
son; "rhe Wages of Salvation" Mrs.
Wilson Woodrow CLANCY of the Jack
Pot" Charles Frederick Holder; '"rhe
Sorrows of Giuseppe George Allan Eng
land Ben b. Lindsey: The Just Judge,
Lincoln Steffens"; ION the RIDGE Mary
Stewart Cutting; "rhe Debts of Antoine"
w. B. MacIIarg; 1.-THE Story of Montana"
C. p. Connolly; MARY Baker G. Eddy"
winter Sunrise" Eden Phillpotts; Lily
Ann" Florence Tinsley Cox
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02
Tunes on Whips.
From an Exchange.

From an Exchange.
THE French" said the sailor, has
whipercrackers' competitions. A French
cabby or trucker is as proud of his whip
crackin' ability as young man is of his
drinkin' powers.
There amt no driver livin' what can
crack whip like a Frenchman. Walkin'
along the streets of Paris is like walxin'
through a battle-on every side bang.
crack, biff! go the whips. The thing
makes you mad 1t scares you. It's as if
gun was continually bein shot off
alongside your ear.
But at the competitions it amt only
the loud cracks that count. They have
artists there-men what can play a toon
on whip. Yes, sir, a toon. I've heerd
'em.
I've heerd the Mar-slays' and TIia-
watha' and 'Foller On played with whip
cracks. and played as delicate and sweet
and lovely as the ear could wish to hear"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02
Woman's Home Companion.

Fiction appropriately favored with the
Christmas spirit is the predominating
feature of the Woman's Home Compan-
ION for December. Mary E. wilkins con.
tributes in 1.-The Gift of Love a typi-
cally wilkins picture of New England
as we have learned to see it through her
delightfully."- entertaining letters. Temple
BAILEY also writes with holiday flavor
in "The Christmas Storm Other fic-
tion i'm this number is contributed by
Juliet Wilbor Thompkins, Jean Webster,
Alice Brown, Julia Truitt Bishop and
Grace S. Richmond. An important feature
of the magazine is a hitherto unpublished
poem by the late Eugene Field entitled,
"Fhe Old Blue Bear and the Rabbit :
It's writing is described by Frederick S.
Field. a son of Gene Field. who was the
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02
Success.

Contents for December: Loretta of the
Shipyard," Ga story, l.. Hopknson Smith
"The Peoples Lobby" Samuel Merwin.
"The econd Offense," Ga story, William
Hamilton Osborne. 1.-THE Quest of the
Querulous," Ga humorous poem), Wallace
Irwin. MY Life-So Far" Josiah Flynt
For Slxudsy," Ga story, Ellis Parker
Butler. 1.-THE Dreyfus Affair." Vance
Thompson. 1.-The Second Generation"
Chapters xxi and xxiD, David Graham
Phillips. Critical Moments in the Lead
ing Plays" Education by Absorption
Crison S. Marden. "Melindy's Bachelor
Club" "a story. Charles f. Martin.
Love Enough for ALL" Ga story, Mary
Hanford Ford. What the Scotch Eat
Isabel Gordon Curtis. 1.-THE Mind of the
Child" Patterson Du Bots.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02

lative and judiciary branches of the gov
eminent were also we'll represented. AS
sistant Secretary of War Oliver occupied
a seat In a box on the army side. Most
of the foreign diplomats who came to
see the game occupied boxes on the sol
dier's side, as guests of the war depart
ment officials. Over on the north side the
center boxes were occupied by Assistant
Secretary of the Navy Newberry and
near him was Secretary of Commerce and
Labor Metcalf.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02

rabbit of his distinguished fathers
poem Among the special articles are
christmas Thoughts" by DR.. Edward
Everett Hale. "Woman's Share in the
New Child Labor Problem" by Samuel
McCune Lindsay, and Easy Make
Christmas PRESENTS" by Grace Margaret
Gould. There are several clever poems
by Wallace Irwin, Edmund Vance Cooke,
Clinton Scotland and Samuel Minturn
Peck, and Christmas play in verse by
katherine Pyle, Howard Pyles sister.
The departments form an unusually
strong and attractive feature in this
number.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.

From the Chicago News.
crafty man isn't necessarily a sailor.
Humility is a virtue that hobbies about
on crutche5.
In football it's a touchdown in matri-
mony it's a shakedown.
Life is not worth living unless you iiys
for the good you can do
The less husbands and wives have TO
say about jealousy the better.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02
Some Mid Winter Baseball Gossip
For The NebeY firing Random DlveIleY
League 2oc Stockholders Next Thursday
thing of Mobile Acquiring MongomeryS FranchseSaay Limit of Elasticity
Committee Named to Secure Lease on the Fair Grounds

be Sunday games, and this would help
not little. Then, Mobile is just as good
town for baseball as is Montgomery
and the game would draw just as well as
in the Capital City. Mobile, right now
is a popular baseball center. The Sea
Gulls of the Cotton States league, won
the pennant last season, and now the
fans of the city on the bay are enthused
with an idea that the teams of the South
ern league are hardly stronger than their
own. When this belief is proved fallicy,
will the spirit die out in Mobile?
However. as stated, 1t would make very
little difference if the Montgomery fran
chise was transferred to Mobile. 1t is
suggested to the would-be buyers of this
franchise, however, that if President
Amerine's figures appear too large, the
Little Rock franchise could probably be
bought considerably cheaper.
All rumors to the effect that the pennant
of the Southern league would be awarded
to Birmingham only after much wrangling
and dispute, seem to have been untrue. 1t
is intimated from headquarters that Bir-
mingham will fly the pennant peacefully.
and that it will be first given to the
breeze amid the cheers of representatives
from every city holding membership in
the league.
The new schedule will be adopted at
the meeting on December q. As usual
it is probable that this schedule will
be made by Sir Mique Finn who has a
wonderful shrewdness in drawing up
document suitable to himself and making
it appear Of a pleasant nature to his
compeers.
The salary limit for another season will
be much talked about when the directors
come together, it is thought Now, the
salary limit in the Southern league is a
garment for the wardrobe, and one which
is worn only under stress. With making
charges, it is generally believed that the
limit last season, $500, was a mere bunch
of figures, standing for nothing sacred
Let the salary limit go, too, Mr.. Director
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02
$4,000 SPECTATORS
SEE GAME IN WALES
Great Rugby Event Between Wales and
South Africa Proves Bril-
liant Affair.

Swansea, Wales. December 1.-The
South Africans. or "Springboks," as the
Africander Rugby football players are
known, defeated the full strength Of
Wales by IL to here this afternoon.
About $4,000 spectators, brought in by
eighty special trains, witnessed the game,
and courts adjourned in order to enable
Judges, lawyers and others to attend.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02
A Fairy Tale.

From the Houston Post.
"Milliners are as potent today as fairies
are said to have been in the old days"
Nonsense! I'd like to see one touch
pumpkin and make it become a coach;
they can't do that"
moo, perhaps not; but I've seen one
of them touch an ostrich plume and cause
it to become pretty girl"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02

Better than custom made are
our ready to put on suits and
overcoats for style, fit and
workmanship. Suits from SIS
to $35; overcoats from $40 to
$50. Marley & Bauman, 1924
First Ave.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02
Notice..

The annual meeting of the stockholders
of the Citizens Savings bank will be held
at its office, 20O3 First avenue, on Tues
day, January s, at noon. for the pur-
pose of electing directors for the coming
year and for the transaction of such other
business as may properly come before it.
C. G. DAVIDSON, Secretary.
12-2-it-su
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02
Puckerless Persimmons.

FTUn FafflInB.
We are accustomed to "thornless cactl'
and ''seedless oranges" but here is new
one-"puckerless persimmons" They are
the result of cross between the Japa-
nese and American varieties, and the fruit
is guaranteed not to pucker the lips.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02

The Southern league as a whole is
thinking of the annual meeting of the
directors, the possible transference OF the
Montgomery franchise to Mobile, and
the booming of the chances of Nashville
under the joint management of Messrs.
Dobbs and Strang.
Locally. fans are thinking of the an
nual meeting of the directors of the Biz
mingham club, the coming of Harry
Vaughn, the probable location of new
baseball park, and the personnel of the
new Baron aggregation and other things.
In other words, the sap is quietly but
surely rising.
The annual meeting of the stockholders
of the Birmingham club will be held
next Thursday. The annual meeting OF
the directors of the league will occur
in Birmingham December 81 1t is very
probable that these two meetings will
be made up chiefly of matters routine.
However, these gatherings are the signals
for preparations for another season. both
as affecting Birmingham and the South
ern league.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02

The offer on the part of Mobile to pur-
chase the Montgomery francise was the
most important and most talked of event
in Southern league circles last week. Ac-
cording to the reports from Montgomery,
Mobile offered to purchase the Montgom-
cry franchise, and President Amerine
was quoted as stating his willingness TO
sell provided his figures were met. 1t is
understood that he wants $4,000.
While this deal, which is still pending
according to reports, was properly given
consideration as a matter OF Importance,
the league would be effected but little II
the Montgomery francise was transferred
to Mobile. In the latter city, there would
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02
Always an Exception.

From the Baltimore American
Don't you believe in capital punishment
for every man who takes another man $
life?"
We'll. not in every case. 1t might be
done. you know, for biographical pur-
poses.''
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02


1t will be interesting to local fans to
know that a committee has been named
to confer with President Culpepper Exunl
of the State Fair association as 10 the
chances of the local baseball club ac-
curing a lease on the fair grounds, or
enough of that plat to accommodate eigh-
teen ball players every afternoon.
The local club is in favor of acquiring
this lease, and of Manager Vaughn
judges the ground suitable, and the mon
etary consideration as satisfactory, those
stunts which keep the people in good
humor in the hot season will be pulled
off there. If the fair grounds cannot be
obtained, then the games next season
will be played at the old park. In case
the latter holding good. the grandstand
and bleachers will be greatly improved
President Baugh stated yesterday after
noon that he was not positive that Man
ager Vaughn would arrive in Birming-
ham before the meeting of the stock
holders. Vaughn has stated that II he was
needed he would be here. President
Baugh wrote him to use his own judg-
ment Therefore. it Is not certain that
he will be here before the league directors
come. The manager is busy looking after
the 1907 team. 1t is now believed that Bir-
mingham will again fly the pennant. 1t is
easier, however, as is known, to fly a rag
through a typewriter than by winning
greater percentage of the seasons
scheduled games. ii. W. K.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02

Either make it large enough to satisfy
those cities of the league which have am
billions to furnish the supporters of the
sport with worthy teams, or else have
it bounded by maximum and minimum
limit. How would ii look to have the
limit between $500 and $500. This would
have the advantage of remaining I'M
broken, at least. Every team would be
within the limit, it is believed The bigger
cities would spend enough money to
satisfy their fans, and the smaller MEM
bers would not be subjected to embarrass-
ment
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-12-02

On arriving in Birmingham, the High
school team was met at the station by
other attendants of the school and given
an ovation.
The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1906-02-22

privation, that every weak organism
born into the world persisted in
the struggle for existence, and only
those of the most perfect type sur
yived
The Chinese eat little and assimi-
late all they eat. They are immune
from many diseases that are scourge
to other races, both white and black.
They can live and enjoy perfect health
crowded in small quarters, such as no
other people can endure. They can
stand on their feet and labor all the
hours not required for Sleep and
swelled joints from such labor is un-
known in the Flowery Kingdom. The
Chinese, without acclimatization, are
at once effective laborers in the arctics
or the tropics, something not true of
any other race. Their racial type
has been long established and
is enduring. Physiologically they
stand at the head of the animal king
dom in the perfection of development
They are not inferior Intellectually
to the white man, but are simply cast
in different mould. The civilization
of China and the civilization Of the
western world are irreconcilable The
white man has far more conceit than
wisdom, and in the not distant future
may repent in sack-cloth and ashes
for disturbing the slumbers of China
The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1906-02-22

low in the not very distant future.
Our population doubled from forty
to eighty million in just thirty years.
1t will be we'll for us to note the
effect of this doubling of popula-
ton of land values, and then consider
how much greater must be the ef-
feet of the doubling of our population
from eighty to one hundred and sixty
millions. We must bear in mind that
the increase in population brings an
increased demand for everything pro-
duced from the land, but the land
itself cannot be increased.
There is no better place to own land
than in Nebraska. The demand of the
hour with the Nebraska farmer is for
the better cultivation of the soil and
improved methods of farming. Hold
on to your land.
The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1906-02-22
THE AWAKENING OF CHINA

The long sleep of China has given
the white man a chance upon the
earth. The awakening of China bodies
no good to the white man whereso-
ever dispersed upon the globe. In
whatever occupation the Chinese have
engaged in any country they have dis
tanced all competitors. The industry
and endurance of the Chinaman sur.
passes that of all others. He can live
on less and perform more. The stern
law of the survival of the fittest, has
wrought for thousands of years to
make him what he is.
Population outran the food supply
in the Celestial Empire long before
Egypt had history, and the condi
ton of existence to the Chinese
through the ages has been so severe
exacting such ability to toll and under
The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1906-02-22
LAND VALUES.

All material wealth is derived from
land and labor. The arabic lands of
the United States are practically all
taken up, and owned either by specu-
lators, investors or farmers The
lands belonging to. the government
and open for homesteads or other &C.
cupancy, are principally grazing, tim
Der or mineral lands. OF these last,
only comparatively small portion
can be reclaimed by irrigation.
The writer we'll remembers the
cheering stanzas of an old song of
our boyhood days that runs as follows:
Come along, come along, make no de-
lay,
Come from every nation, come from
every way,
Our land is broad enough, so don't
be alarmed,
Uncle Sam is rich enough to give
us all farm
The cheering boastful claims OF the
old song were true at the time they
were written. At that time the popu-
lation of the country was less than
half that of the present time. and
none living at that time expected to
see the day when good farm land
could not be had for the taking. But
that day has arrived. Good farm
lands are yet comparatively cheap.
But all must admit that in view of
what has taken place during the past
thirty years, the time is in sight when
it will require the labor Of lifetime
of an individual to earn the price of
a good farm. Therefore those who
now own good farm lands can do no
better than to retain them and pass
them down to their children.
Those who are not fortunate enough
to be owners of good farm lands
should lose no time in securing such.
The price may seem high, but such
is not the case. Good land is cheap
at present prices. 1t may seem high
to those who remember what it could
have been purchased for a few years
ago, but present prices will look very
The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1906-02-22
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