The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1906-02-09

they would burn pa alive.
Just then the man who had charge
of our c%annibals, who each had a dog
that they were looking for a place to
roast, came along and I told him about
thesIndians' corn roast, and he ordered
the cannibals to 60 drive the Indians
away from their fire and roast thei1
dogs. Well it worked like a charm,
and the eannibais made a rush for tle
Indians and drove them away just as
they had lighted the fire around pa:
and we were not a minute too soon.
After the Indians had skedaddled for
the woods, and we cut the cords that
bound pa, the cannibals went to, work
and skun the dogs, and began to cook
them, and pa looked on, until it made
him squirmish, but he was so tickled
at being saved from. the Indians, that
he tried to be a good fellow with the
cannibals. 1 guess it would have been
all right, only the: cannibals got to
drinking the. Philadelphia beer, and
then it was all of, cause roast dog
wasn't good enough for them, ane
they wanted to roast pa.
First they offered pa dog to eat, but
he had swore OF on dog, and passed
on it., and that made: the cannibals
mad, and they got ready to roast pa
and I guess they would have eaten
him half cooked, if it hadn't been foI
the performers and freaks who hat
missed their pet-dogs, and the circus
hands told them the cannibals hat
just gone to the woods with a mess OF
dogs to roast for a dog feast.
Well, they were just getting a fire
around pa, and he was giving the
grand hailing sigh of distress, whep
the performers, headed by the fat
woman, whose peeled Mexican dog
was lost in the shuttle, came in
amongst the cannibals, and pa and the
other dogs rescued, in the
darnedest fight 1 ever saw. The per-
formers just walked right over the
'cannfbals, and mauled them with
stakes, and all the dogs that had not
been killed were pulled away from
the heather, and saved. The fat
woman got her dog all right, and
when pa came up from the stake
where they were going to burn him.
and congratulated her on recovering
her dog, she turned on pa and accused
him of being the leading cannibal.
and that he was the one who put up
the whole job to steal the dogs. She
jabbed him with a parasol, but pa
"a innocent.
The Indians got back to the tent
along towards morning, and the can
nibals went back with us, and we had
to feed them on ~weiners,, which was
the nearest to roast uog we could get
for them at that time of night.
Pa seems to get it in the neck in
this show, cause everything that goes
wrong Is laid to him, and If anything
goes right, somebody else gets the
credit, and I think he would resign If
it was not for his pride. After the
trouble about the Indians and the
cannibals the manager called pa up
and ~reprimanded him for Inducing
the tribes in their wild orgies, and
said we couldn't maintain discirline
as long as pa mixed up with them and
encouraged them in such things.
Pa tried. to explain that he was the
victim instead of being the cause of
the dog roast, but the manager dis
missed pa by telling him not to let it
occur again. Then to show the incon.
sistency of the manager, he ordered
pa to go on ahead of the show to New
York, and advertise that the cannibals
in II show would give an exhibition
of roasting and eating a human being,
and to offer a reward for anybody that
would consent to be roasted and eat.
en- in public.
Pa has gone to New York to look
for somebody who will take the. posi-
ton of meat for the cannibals, and he
is instructed to spare no expense to
lind such a man. He thinks he may
find somebody connected with the
Equitable Life insurance scandal, who
has lost all desire to live any longer,
and who will gladly go into this "mu-
tual' scheme. I don't know.
This circus business is too much for
cause I am losing friends all the
time. Even the monkeys have got so
they seem to be ashamed to be seen
talking to me-. and when I pass the
monkey cage they turn their backs on
me, as though did not belong to their
set. When a fellow gets so low that
monkeys feel above him, and throw
out sarcastic remarks when he goes
by, 1t is time to change your luck
some way.
WHEN HIS wife CAME HOME