The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1906-02-24

1t to be? 1t was Dandelion beer How
would you like to live in Maine?" i
l didn't answer the captains question
and he told me another Maine story,
which l wouldn't believe from a less
truthful man. 1t was about a store
keeper. II was i'm the store one Satur-
day when the customers were coming
in to settle" said the veracious cap
tain. "The merchant is an old boy
hood friend and fhuch did I enjoy chat
ting with him. on this occasion in
came a certain customer to ask for his
bill. A cheap brown paper book was
consulted and the customer was told
that his account was seventeen cents.
He objected. There must be a mis-
take somewhere. He was quite sure
he didn't owe as much as that. The
old man went back to his books figured
some more and returned with a very
crestfallen air You are right, he
said. 81 made a mistake You made
a cash payment of four cents last Sat
urday.' Then they settled the account
and the old man didn't know why
laughed till I nearly fell over"
g G G 9
Say" said disgruntled friend Of
mine why don't you give the Promo
ton Committee tip for a catch-word
Come to Honolulu and hear our Night
Noises"
''Noises?" 1 said "Why man, you're
crazy. The quietness of the Honolulu
nights is rather a source of complaint
from people who like it a bit noisy"
"Well, they ought to come up my
way said the complaining one. There
must be an egg factory somewhere in
the neighborhood for there are chick
ems all over the place. And there are
other things. Last night l was rest
less and couldn't get to slesp for a
while. 1 was just doing when there
was a terrible row outside. 1 was
scared for minute and then my half
awakened brain told me that it was a
dog fight. 1 went out into the MOON
light and threw stones at the dogs. I'm
sorry to say that in the moonlight my
aim is always bad, but L scared the
dogs and went back to bed. In a few
minutes l was sorry had. for two cats
commenced a conversation which, no
matter how interesting it may have
been to them, was the reverse to me,
SO 1 had to get up and scare the
cats. 1 suppose the row must have
awakened the roosters for though it
was still in the small hours and there
was not the slightest sign of dawn
heard the flap of wings and the most
atrocious Cock-a-doodle-do that ever
disgraced a poultry yard. 1t was
wheezy and asthmatic, but it did the
trick Instantly, from every point Of
the compass came answering challenge:
from indignant roosters whose dreams
had been disturbed. 1 wouldn't mine
tackling one rooster or even two at 6
pinch because I'm brave, but when il
comes to going against a whole Punch
bowl hill of 'em why count me out.
81 quit, went back to bsd and cover
ed up my head. And then there came
a most unearthly sound which froze
my hood. What was it? 1 thought
it was the Last Trump and that would
see Gabriel in a blaze of light some
where up Tantalus way. But it wasn't
the last trump, for three more followed
it, each more unearthly than the rest
1t was the dredger down in the harbol
politely answering the request of some
mud-hooker to lower her lines.
Several times more during the
watches of the night not the still
watches mark you, did the dogs bark
the cats spit the ROSTERS crow and
the dredger shrek but towards dawn
there was another fearful sound. A
stertorious roar filled the air and my
scant locks rose in alright. 1t was
awful. l rushed all unannounced to
the next room, from which a madden
ing snore had proceeded with irrita-
ting regularity all night and begged tC
know what it meant.
"'Why that's the way We have OF
announcing a steamers arrival" he
said That means that the Manchuria
has been sighted and then he made
an insulting remark.
" Have you been on a BATE he asked
You've been making a most ensan-
guined sheOl of a row all night.
CpE AIMS