davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31
THE SPIRIT OF TRAVEL.
Seeing Ones Own Country Before
Taking . Trip Abroad.

Going abroad enjoys the pres
tlge of many generations and its
paths are deep rutted 1t has lost
oil claim TO distinction, however.
and nowadays Is not a thing to talk
about among your friends unless
YOU wish 10 bore them to distrac-
tion. The tourist party has made
the undertaking 80 commonplace
that TO have whizzed through Eu-
rope implies neither a long purse
nor the slightest originality of in
! tellect. was once crossing in a
steamer which contained an average
muster rod of touring Americans.
Those who were making their first
trip abroad and felt inclined to put
on some small airs about ii were
speedily cowed and abashod. They
found that most Of their fellow
voyagers had crossed from three to
ten times. and that the only pas
senger who enjoyed the slightest
distinction was a veteran who was
doing his twenty-siXth run across
the pond.
Far be il from me to decrv the
enlightening advantages Of sight
seeing in the old world, where age.
tradition and the novel aspect Of
people and things arouse the imag-
ination and refresh the tired mind.
But for one American who returns
in a wholly refreshed and satisfied
condition | will find YOU another
who will confess to numberless irri-
tations because Of petty and organ
lied swind.es and extortions wagpd
against the Yankee in Il strange
land, and to futile ANNOYANCE over
bad hotels, poor railway service and
a ciyilitv that is won and held only
on cash basis.
/ Largely because it has been pos
/ sible for the man of moderate in
come to spend one or two month,
abroad for a considerably >mallo!
outlay than he could tour his own
country, he puts seeing America
last instead of first, and it has been
uphill work to induce people who
travel to listen to the claims Of the
undiscovered land toward the Gold.
en- Gate. 1t has come to pass, how.
ever. that the journey from New
York to California is considcre5
worth talking about as much as IT,
trip to London or Paris, and there
are grounds for hope that at no fat
distant time the average American
with money and time for a SUNNI,
or winter holiday will take pains
study his own land before he file.
to the nec~est steamship Office t
get sailing schedule Stuart /.
Douglas in Outing Magazine.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31

A lady applied the other day for
tickets for the royal inclosure at
Ascot for self, daughters and for a
Miss Y. of Montreal. She received
tickets for herself and daughters,
with a communication that Miss y.
of Montreal should apply for a
ticket through the American am
bassador The only parallel We can
think of to this grip of geography
on the part of the powers that be
is the reply of the celebrated Duke
of Newcastle, who, on being inform
ed that Newfoundland was an is
land, shook hands warmly with his
informant and said: "Thank you,
thank you. You always bring US
good news."-London Globe.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31
His PoIiteness.

Matt ". Ransom, late senator from
North Carolina, made politeness a
point of conscience. One day he
saw the very worst bore of his ac-
quaintance, and with short
"Howdy do" brushed swiftly past.
The bore. evidently hurt, proceeded
sadly Ransom's conscience smote
him. After ten steps he turned
back, and, with a pleasant smile,
called back: "Goodby, Simpkins! !!
I've been thinking a mighty heap
about YOU lately, Simpkins." The
bore's face relaxed. "Ahn' said he,
returning. Ransom waved him back
wildly with both hands, crying,
'1've been thinking a mighty heap
about you lately, Simpkins; but
don't come back, Simpkins; don't
come back!"- Washington Post.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31

Mark Twain has been telling this
billiard story: "Once when | was
TN underpaid reporter in Virginia
City stranger came and opened a
billiard parlor. went to see him,
and he proposed game, to which |
agreed. Before we begin he said,
iust knock the balls around little
so that | can get your gait | did
so for awhile, and then he said:
4 will be perfectly fair with you.
I'll play you left handed | felt
hurt, for he was cross eyed, freckled
and had red hair, so | determined
to teach him lesson for his audacl-
! ty. He won first shot and ran clean
out, taking my half dollar, and all
[ got was the opportunity to chalk
my cue. IF you can play like that
with your left hand I said, I'd like
to see you play with your right.
I can't was the prompt reply. I'm
left handed STRAY Stories.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31
The Archer Fish.

The archer fish has a natural blow
gun. This animal possesses the curl
Gus property of being able to shoot
drops of water from its mouth with
extraordinary accuracy to consider
able distances This singular faculty
is of use to the animal in securing
its food. \ fly or small insect pass
ing over the water has very little
chance of escape from the deadly
aim of the archer fish. The drop of
water brings down the insect. which
is then incontinently devoured.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31
A FREAK OF NATURE.

One Of the freaks of nature in
Indian Orchard, Mass, is cherry
tree growing on top of an eighty
foot chimney. 1t Is a thriving tree,
standing ten feet above the cap Of
the chimney. and it has grown
rapidly despite fierce winds which
have bent it almost double on its
lofty perch. Every spring ii BIOS
SONS, and later comes the fruit, To
the delight of the bird colonies of
the neighborhood. The chimney
is a little weather beaten at the top,
the cspstones broken away and
MANY of the bricks knocked out by
the rsvsges of the weather Little
by little the wind has brought grains
of sand and soil there, and filled
in all these little inches and holes,
until small aerial garden is flour
ishing all around the rim. Grass
and flowers are growing there IN
several varieties. and can readily be
distinguished with field glasses. But
the most remarkable thing about
this lofty garden is the cherry tree.
1t is probable that some bird Is re-
sponsible for it, dropping cherry
stone there while eating the fruit
on the top of the chimney. The
stone lodged in one of the dirt filled
inches, where it sprouted. 1t is a
puzzle, however, how the roots OF
the tree have found room to spread
SO as to allow it to grow to height
of ten feet.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31
A LITTLE NONSENSE.
How a Dimes Worth Of High Life
Started a eslky Team.

The old man was driving heavy
load when hI, team. suddenly COM
Ing 10 a bog hole, baked. lie tried
every way To start it. CoaXing, pray
ing and tlosging helped none and
svelriug very little. lie had almost
given up when he saw a Young man
coming lei,urelv down the road.
The Young man stopped and said ;
stuck, ell: III get YOU out for 10
cents
The old man jumped at the
.hancc. The Young man produced
a small bottle Of liquid and dashed
a drop on each horse. No sooner
had he done this than the horses
plunged forward and we're gone.
The old man asked exciJedly, What
kind of stuff Is that"
"IIigh life"
"Well." the old man said nerv-
ously. handing him 35 cents. put
quarters worth on me. I've got
TO catch that team" - Judge:
Magazine of Fun.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31
Mr.. Whyte and Mr.. German.

In the summer of 1871 Mr..
Whvte, the new senator from Mary
land, then senator and Democratic
state leader, was seated in his law
office in Lexington street, between
CORTLAND and Calvert. A slender
Young man, slightly above medium
height, with pale, intellectual face,
long, straight black hair and large,
keen blue eyes, entered the room
where the senator and party leader
was examining law report and,
with a winning smile and putting
out his hand, said:
Senator Whyte, | have come in
to say that | am favorable to your
nomination for governor. | am Ar
thur German of Howard county"
Although he had heard of him
as rising young Democrat, it was
Mr.. Whyte's first meeting with the
late Senator German.
When the legislature of 1872 con-
vened the county leaders went to
Governor Whyte, who had just been
inaugurated, for advice as to the
election of the speaker of the house
of delegates. With characteristic
decision and discernment the gov
ernor said:
"Why, YOU have just the man for
the place"
"Who?' the then estate crowd"
asked in chorus.
"Young German of Howard" an
swered Governor Whyte, whose
word was law. and Mr.. German be-
came the speaker.-Baltimore Sun.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31
A Lost Rebuke.

"Gcorgc," said she in tone of
bitter rebuke, "as far as | can see
you are going to the dogs
"You're never contented, Maria
returned her crring husband. you
made me give up horses, and here
you are complaining about dogs. Do
l object to your cats and your cana
ries? No, madam. ! would scorn
to interfere with your pets, and l
beg of YOU to respect my preference
for nobler animals"
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31
In Self Defense

Major iIamm. editor and manager of
the Corstitutionslist, Eminence, KY.
when he was fiercely attacked, four years
ago. 10y Piles, bought box of Bucklrn's
Arnica Salve. Of which he says : ..It
cured me in ten days aud no trouble
since" Quickest healer of Burus, Sores,
Cuts and Wounds. 25c at John w
Thurston's drug store.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31

Darling" said the new bride, q
had terrible feeling of sadness
come over me this afternoon at 4
o'clock-a sort of feeling that you
were doing something that would
break my heart if l knew of it.
Think, sweet, what were YOU doing,
now, this afternoon at t o'clock"
81 was licking stamps" replied
the husband promptly, ''and pasting
them on envelopes" = New York
Press. - -. -. /.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31
CONDENSED STORIES.
A Story That Made Senator John
Sherman Laugh.

The late Senator John sherman.
whenever he went 10 New York
city, nearly always consented TO see
and submit to an interview with
Homer Fort, a journalist who knew
more public men by sight and in
teryiewed more prominent people
perhaps than George Alfred Town
send. Mr.. Sherman's friendliness
for Mr.. Fort began in an amusing
way. The latter sent his card TO
the ex-secretary of the treasury. who
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31
The Scapeeoat.


Now when anything goes wrong
Blame your wife.
If the butter is too strong,
Blame your wife.
If the coffee is too weak,
If the bathtub springs a leak,
Blame it on your patient, meek
Little wife.
II the rain comes pouring down,
Blame your wife.
II the stock or chickens drown,
Blame your wife.
If by aharpers you're beguiled.
If you are misfortune's child.
Blame your all enduring, mild
Little wife.
II you suffer from the gout,
Blame your wife.
II you're getting down and out,
Blame your wife.
Sure for anything that's bad
She's the one at fault egad!
Blame It all upon your sad
Little wife.
Louisville Courier-Journal
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31
Paoanini's Violin.

Paganini came by his fayorite vio-
lin in a curious way. A French mer-
chant lent him the instrument to
play upon at concert at Leghorn.
After the concert Paganini brought
it back to its owner, when the latter
exclaimed. to the delighted aston
ishment of the player: "Never more
will | profane the strings which
your fingers have touched. That
instrument Il yours"
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31
Not CompIieated.

"Weally," began Charlie, when
girl wefuscs me it bweaks me all
up"
YES, replied Miss Pepprey, but
then you're SO simple its easy to
put you together again Detroit
Free Press
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31
Behind His Back

"Ranter says he has never had
stage fright"
at is evident then that he isn't
afraid of spoiled eggs and decayed
vegetables. Chicago Record Her
aid.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31
His Choice,

Yeast-Would you rather ride on
the band wagon or the water wagon
Crimsonbeak - Why, the band
wagon. of course. The fellow on
the water wagon never gets ahead.
Y IonkerS Statesman.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31
Not Acquainted.

Mrs. Madison-How do YOU like
your new neighbors:
Mrs. Dyer i don't know. l
haven't tried to borrow anything
yet.-Town and Country.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31
Ruins.

"What was the most interesting
ruin that YOU saw abroad"
"Weil," answered Mr. CumroX,
"the ruin that most interested me
Vas a years income, totally demol-
ished. Washington Star.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31
AN ENVIABLE
SAVINGS BANK RECORD.
The LAMOILLE COUNTY SAVINGS BANK
AND TRUST COMPANY OF HYDE PARK

opened its doors for business January 2I 1880 from
which time its deposits have steadily increased until
they now amount to more than Seven Hundred Thou
sand Dollars evdencing the strong and abiding faith
that the public have ever had in this institution
1t is with excusabe pride that the management
gencies and pancs, there has never been six months
period since the organization of the Bank that did not
show an increase i'll the deposits.
AS is we'll known, ex-C1ov Page the President Of
the Bank, has always been strong believer in the idea
that Vermont money ought to be kept in Vermont to
foster Vermont enterprises and to build Up Vermont
industries. He has acted upon the principle that it is
only for the good OF Vermont but for the safety of
the Bank to do this because the security for home
loans always be carefully examined and considered
by the Directors of the Bank The result of this line
OF conduct the part this Bank is that it now holds
the unique record OF never having lost dollar by
poor note, nor does it hold SO far as known, a
single dollar of poor or doubtful paper.
This Bank pays 5l2 per cent. interest compounded
semannually and socits deposits from all who regard
safety OF principal rather than high rates OF interest as
the first prerequisite in the proper conduct OF Savings
Institutions and who believe that is not only safer
but witha better for the depostor that his money be
invested at home where it will help the in which
he is primarily interested.
Send your postal card referring to this
paper, and leahet giving interesting facts touching
this Bank will be sent TO You free postpaid.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31

>hc-I don't know what is the
matter w.h these shoes, but they
don't feel a bit comfortable.
Nc-Marbc they don't hurt YOU
enough.-PMIadelphia Press.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1906-08-31
WHAT

you buy is important, but not so
important as what you get.
Shop at the
CROSS STREET PHARMACY.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-01-04

Washington, Jan. 1.-Vice Presi
dent Fairbanks, according to reports
that reached Washington from Chi.
caeo, 10 the first OF the candidates
Tor President in 1908 to select a cam.
paign manager. 1t Is said that Mr..
Fairbanks has selected as bis man.
ager Charles g. Dawes, ex-comptroller
Of the currency. Dawes will zee thas
the Fairbanks boom is started prop.
eriy In the Middle West, where he Ia
we'll known and strong politically.
de was one Of the political lisutsn-
ants OF the late senetor Hanna and
was appointed comptroller by Mr..
Mckinley IN the latter's first admin
lstrsHon. he resigned to enter the
senatorial contest In Illinois. In
Which Senator Hopkins was success.
'ul. Later b accepted the presidency
d tho Central Truss company Of
Illinois IN Chicago and still holds |
hat position. he = regarded here
y . shrevd politician.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-01-04
Order OF Publication.

'iAih W MISSOURI,
County Of Bates IS.
In the Circuit Court. in Vacation Nov ~ ,.ox
Henry Morehead, Plaintiff. '''' ''' i'0'
Mary e. M Nc; Defendants.
=, NOW az This day comes the plsintifY herein nv
ms attorney, W o. Jackson, and flIes ia n.ti ~
that der CSn alleging. among other things
resident OF the state Of Missouri: - nun
Al, Mnsreupon, tits ordered by the CLERK IN v...-
n Mon, mat SAID defendant be notified bvnnb-
hcaicn tnst plaintiff has Commenced = sn,t
ssI'pst ner In this court, the objf Of and ZEN.
d dia nature Or which 10 to obtain 3 decree a.
IN h.H; On tne ground that the defendant here
wire OF The plaintiff has sbsented he rssls franz
me plaln TN wi, bout reasons able cause FOR ons
, mnoie yehr, 10 wit since the - dsv NJ nsr
wv ana tnet unless the said Mary n nors,,
, nesu DC apa appear at this court, a. the MATT
court Suss 70 70 De begun and holden ct he
On ING nrst Monday In February. iStS sra y 70
" ", DeIore the hrst day OF said term. snsvsr A.
Plssq 70 the petition In said canse. re s.r ~
W. VIII oe taken % confessed, and judrment NH
W rendered accordingly "i''
h. nrsii = Iurtner ordered, that COW herroe
aD,s9s1, according to law, in THs Bumrn
Dhy OF Bstes for four weeks succsssivsiv 1
ko. !. @ y least once week, the nm irss
s son % De % least thirty days before ~ S,st
10y Vi ssid next February term Of this sosrf
a. =. PATTERSON, Circuit Clerk.
FAM, = uue coPy fr0m the record VII
cui sniff conyy. n as 8. and seal OF ths Cir
day Of Decs n ss.e ,os COUNTY. this -
s.lt J. A. PATTERSON.
Circuit Ca
" n. BARKLkY. D. C.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-01-04
SHERIFFS BALK AT
BEING HANGMEN.
Stats Association lnderses Res
elutions 10 Abolish Execu-
lions in County lails.
MISSOURI PRISON THE PLACE

st. Leafs Republic, ..
A resolution offered by Sheriff P
Fl. Clarke at the convention OF tb
State Sheriff's Association OF Mis-
sour, at the court house, that tn
Legislature be requested TO pass ,
law requiring executions to TAX
place at Jefferson City, was adopted
unanimously. The resolution 10 a.
follows:
"Be 1t resolved by this association
That the execution in the respective
counties OF this State OF those con
victed OF criminal ofienses subserves
no possible good, but, on the con.
trary. on account OF the publicity
that is usually given OF the same
through the press and otherwise, It
only tends, in our opinion, to de-
moralize q portion OF our commu.
nifty, on which account and for which
reason we recommend that the Leg
islsture OF this State, at its next SEES
sion, amend the criminal statutes in
such a manner as that they will pro-
vide that the execution OF all those
convicted OF capital offences be re.
quired by law to take place In the
Psnitentiary at Jefferson City,"
1t was also resolved that the
Sheriffs use their sndpavors in favor
OF the proposed amendment to the
State Constitution making the term
OF Office Of Sheriff four years. The
term now Is two years. The amend.
ment will be voted upon next Novem.
Der.
e. b. Bacon, sheriff OF Saline coun-
ty, was elected president and Thos. |
b. Kilcullin, execution deputy under
Sheriff P. Ii. Clarke, secretary.
Sheriff Clarke was re elected treas
urer.
1t was decided to hold the next
convention at Jefferson City on the
first Thursday in September, 1906.
6. A Smith, sheriff OF Cole county,
the retiring president, presided q the
meeting.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-01-04
QLaxx1:
Another Poisoned Candy Case,

linton, Ia, Jan. With the
words Merry Christmas" written
on the wrapping, box Of poisoned
CANDY was mailed to the home OF
Mics Melia Christensen. The box con.
tanned dozen bon bone, which had
been STEPPED in carbolic acid. They
contained enough poison to kill u
dozen persons. Miss Christensen was
warned by the odor and did not eat
them fhecase has been turned over
20 the authorities.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-01-04
Order OF Publication.

In the ,a., Circuit Court, in Vacation Decembe,
". Harkins, Plaintiff.
N Hsrkins, B. r. Harkips.
\. L. Harkins, .. P. Harkips,
{. A. Allen and the Walton
trust Company, Defendants.
NOV ~ this Gay comes the plain til herein nv
ms attornev,J Silvers and 6les bis neti
E. 1Hsss GsheE H,1ss ,a.. dsfsnS
Harkins are non-residents Of the state of Nj.
souri,: 'A0 ''"'e vi MIS-
Whereupon. 1t 10 ordered by thu clerk in
vacation that said defendants be notified nv
s ruJncauon mat plaintiff has commenced suit
against them In this court, the object and oen.
eIM nature OF which is to obtsin a decree IN
partition for the following described real es,.ts
iylng and berg situate in the county of Rste.
ana state OF Missouri, to wit:
"a. .ns ortneaat quarter Of the northwest ausr-
aoa anu tne northwest quarter Of the northeast
quarter OF section thirty ca ana the noyths
East quarter OF the southwest ouarter an, tho
soutneast quarter Of the north seet ousrter NJ
secuon twenty-seven, all in toTnshlp thirty.
sale or ~ 2, ~. isnse tsa and for tie
proceeds Of such sale between the parties ni.in0
tin ana defendants herein Above act rsorth
s &c 70 their respective rights and intsr.
"a !, tne same, se may be found by the court
sppesr Al th1. ,ae saiS defendants be and
% . oe Degun and holden ct the court bouss n
Weep me GC o. Bltler, in aid county, On Tho 6yst
~ Hsonscay IN February, 1905. and On or before
he H. Isy o. ssid term; answer or plead to
""' " lenoersd
!. nno y 2 further ordered, that . COW hsreos
y puDnsnsd. according 70 law, In ths BUTISa
,cnntx :, Ann .. nsvspaper lublished In said
' q, q least once week. the I'M inssyy.
a0n g 9: q least thirty days before ~ 1T
" Of sead next February term Of this ennrt
. =. 4 PAITIKsON, Circuit Clsrs
a vus eoSy mon the record.
witness my hand, and seel q the |
tskAL.I Cirseit Celu q Betse OcSnfv' 80
letA day q December. M.
IA. PATTERSON, CIrouit C1erh.
.. =. HAnKLBY, d. c,
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-01-04
PRISON BOARD FlRm
FOR OUSTIEG GUARDS.
Further Breach PrshabIs g.
tween Governor and In
specters Relative 10
Penitentiary.

Jefferson City, No, Jan. ] -Trcu
be 10 brewing between the Board 81
Prison Inspectors, Deputy Wsrjez
See and the yardmssttrs upon The
one hand. asd Governor and Warden
Hall upon the other, over therenov.
slofthe twenty elk inefficient guards.
The Governor and War en- would
decrease the list Of discharges we're Il
In their lower, and have asked the
board, IL 10 said, TO lessen the mum
Der, or to revise the list.
Butthe board IL nrm, and the mem
bers say the list as compiled by De
putty Warden See and she ysrdmas
tsrs nust be removed.
A meeting was beld, at which
Warden Hall was present, and the
matter lie said to have provided a
stormy discussion.
The board believes the men sho
have direct supervision Of the guard.
ought to be competent to Judge the
efficiency OF the guards, and TO point
'ut definitely the inoompesent ones.
Bssides the dismissal OF the twenty
'ix guards, the board and Warden
discussed the allotment Of sps,e In
he factory buildings 80 Gissecke 4
'riesmeyer. who wish to maintain
sctories in the prison for the msnp-
scture Of coarse goods.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-01-04
Noted Cartoonist Dies.

New York, Jan. Louis Dial
rymple, the eartocnist, who has
made thousands laugh, dieu last
week at the 7 ong Island home at
Amityvilie. The artist became in
sane SIX weeks ago, and during the
last three weeks his condition vas so
pitiful that his relatives end friends
looked upon his expected death as q
merciful release for him. He was AZ
years old.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-01-04
Fishing In Hickory County.

The Hermitage Index, of Hermit
age. Hickory county, reports that
the Pomede Terre, a stream Of that
county, 'sfull Of foe fish and that the
citizens residing nearby are occurring
al OF them they can and storing
them away. The paper states that
swothoussnd pounds Of flsh. most Of
which were about six inchssin length,
have been taken from the stream.