Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1906-03-03
MISS WEEKS JEALOUSY.

! am as fond of pure, unauthorized
fun as anybody. | believe nave as keen
an appreciation of the ludierous and can
discover the nib" of a joke as quickly
as the next man" / glory i'll a good,
hearty, old-fashioned GUT faW'-to me 1T
is tonie--it eXhilarates-it braces me.
But | never was fond OF a practical Joke,
for | have always been unable to see
cause for real mirth in the discontinue
of fellow creature.
1t is singular fact that your practical
joker, rs a general thing, is the last one
to appreciate Il practical joke of which
he is the victim. Some there are who will
take it in good part and laugh as loudly
as the rest at his own discontinue, but
such are not often found.
Caleb Weeks, who will be remembered
by many old New Workers. and who at
one time kept public house on Long
Island, is said to have been the most in
veterate practical joker on record. lie
would go out of his way at any time to
crafty his peculiar propensity, and many
are the anecdotes told concerning him.
But he once met his match.
One John Smith, having been victimized
by Caleb. determined-to use his own eX-
pression-to get square" with his tor
mentor, and while Caleb was absent from
home on one occasion, on business which
was likely to dctain him in New York
for some days, John sought his hostelry
on Long Island and desired to see Mrs.
Weeks When that lady presented her
self, John gazed at her with some aston
tishment, and at length yentured to say:
There must be some mistake madam.
| desired TO see Mrs Weeks--Mrs. Caleb
! Weeks"
'Well l am Mrs. Caleb Weeks. What
is it you wish?"
You are not the Mrs. Caleb Weeks
whom | desire to see" returned John, in
a positive tone; the lady whom | am in
quest of is much younger than yourself,
taller and-pardon me, madam much
finer looking. She has large lustrous blue
eyes, wreath of golden hair, rosy
cheeks. a rosebud mouth, and is in every
way beautiful Besides, she was very
richly dressed, and wore a profusion of
diamond iewery. One magnificent ring
| noticed particularly, which she said her
husband had recently presented to her as
Il birthday present. | am jeweler my
self, madam, and know the value of dia-
monds. In fact, my business here is to
return to Mrs. Weeks a valuable diamond
brooch which | have been resetting for
her"
Now Mrs Weeks. be 81 known, was
terribly Jealous of her husband, and her
eyes snapped fire as she enioincd;
Il tell YOU again. sir, that / am Mrs.
Weeks, and there is none other. If the
brooch is designed for Mrs Weeks, give it
to me"
Excuse me- madam" replied John,
with much eaTncstness, you are not the
lady to whom Mr.. Weeks introduced me
rs his wife and. much as | commiserate
Your unhappy lot-for | perceive now
plainly that Mr.. Weeks is Il great scoun-
drel-l cannot place the diamonds in your
possession since to do so would be a
breach of trust. This is Il most unfor-
tunate business. and | deplore it deeply.
| regret very much that | had anything
to do with it. Good morning, madam.
hope Mr. Weeks will be able to explain
things satisfactorily" And John Smith
bowed himself out.
1t may well he imagined that Mrs.
Weeks was i'll no very amiable frame OF
mind when Caleb as innocent as a lamb,
and all mSuspcctlng the stormy scene
which awaited him. returned home. For
three days She had been nursing her
wrath to keep it warm and when at
length her husband entered her presence
and rushed forward for his kiss of well
come, She sternly waved him off, holding
her right hand behind her the while and
said. with terrible calmncss:
How Is Mrs. Weeks, Caleb? Why
didn't YOU bring her home with You?~
Caleb saw Mt once that his wife was
either in dead earnest about something OF
had suddenly taken leave OF her senses.
Then il occurred to him that she might
be displcased because he had remained
absent SO long. So he said. alphabetically
Il don't know what you mean by how
Is Mrs. Weeks? and why didn't ! bring
her home" my dear. | suppose you are
IN one OF your good -natmed Jokes. | am
glad 10 see You in such excellent humor.
was afraid YOU might not like it be
cause | didn't get home sooner. But
had good deal to look after, You know
many purchases to make. many differ
ent parties to see and all that sort of
thing. So don't he cross. but give Us Il
Kiss and say no more about it,"
Yes rejoined Mrs. Weeks. with flash
ing eyes. Il know all about the parties
YOU had to see and the purchases you had
to make. hope YOU didn't pay too much
for the diamonds YOU bought"
Diamonds, my dear! Diamonds" eX-
claimed Caleb slightly bewildcrcd: what
the deuce are YOU talking aboutY | have
bought no diamonds! | believe You are
taking leave of your Senses!"
she is much younger than I am" re.
turned Mrs. Weeks, significantly. taller
better man than they are"