Los Angeles herald., 1906-11-28
Pi-LineS and Pick-UpS
ThanI,aniuInn

'HetlFNoHiNlUQ
When small boys lie in bed and dozo
0,i Wnen every school door has to close,
When there is respite from all woes
That's Thanksgiving morn
When turkey crowns the tables head
Surrounded by cranberries red.
And every one on mince pies fed
That's Thanksgiving noon.
When every youth dons football ciou,o.
And tries to slide upon his nose.
And breaks his arm and stubs bis toos
That's the Thanksgiving game
And when at last he's home to bod
Grim monsters crowd around his bed
And mince pie feels as light as lead.
That's Thanksgiving night.
HOWARD II. KRUGER
In time we may learn to forgive
Count Boni for making such an ass of
himself unless he finally concludes to
write book.
Sarah Bernhardt is broke. sarah's
great financial mistake was not i'm be-
Ing a member of the original Florodora
sextet.
The difference between sailor and a
lawyer is that one enlsts for fights on
sea and the other enllsts for fees on
sight.
1t Is easy enough to become famous
All you have to do is heave a rock at
marriage, the family, or the Ten Com
mandments.
Booze drops continue to be sold at
washington, d. c. because a chemical
analysis shows that they are not
legally Intoxicating" Just illegally in
tcXicating, which, Of course, does not
count.
There is just one trouble about all
the scientific systems OF training girls
to be wives. They would consider
themselves far too good for the few
men who would be fools enough to ask
such superior persons to marry them.
In the 800, 900 900 spent for luxuries
IN this country last year no account
was taken of Hearst's political BOOM
Palm-I just kissed Boston girl
Pepper-Broke the ice, eh?
A London doctor says bridge is a dis
ease. The remedy is the same as for
appendicitis-cut it out.
Some Doubt as to What Happened
Luther Corder had his runabout
smashed up last Thursday evening
while 1t was hitched in front of a resi-
dence in the west part of the city.
From the effects of the wreck it must
have been hit by an automobile or an
other buggy which must have been
going at top speed as one front wheel
was completely destroyed the shaves
broke and the harness torn from the
horse while If pGcpna6 nj
smash up occurred quickly and quietly
as Luther, new nothing of it until he
started to unhitch and found his buggy
dragged some distance from the horse.
No clue os to who the other fellow was
could be found, but who ever it was the
still have Luthers' brest strap among
their trimmings. Wheather it was an
auto or another rig, it is remarkable
how the horse came out without "a
scratch.-Girard Qll) Gazette.
Secretary Shaw will retire, but he
hasn't announced what bank he'll be
president of.
Poppy-I shall have to put my foot
down when return to Chicago.
Magnolia-That's no small undertake
ing, is it, dear?
Even the sunny haired girl can have
cloudy disposition.
Batting rebates is a favorite occupa-
tion now.
o, Mr.. Caruso,
What ever made you do so?
The man who draws the color line is
not necessarily an artist.
Upton says Philadelphia girls are
"simply lovely" Probably New York
girls are elaborately lovely, then.
That western man who has a record
of every quarrel with his wife must
run scrap" book.
Orange = Misfortunes never come
Singly, old man.
Lemon-Yet you only wed one woman
a. time, y'know.
The octopus will have to lose a good
many limbs before it is on it's last leg.
Hetty Green's prejudice against trusts
hasn't led to her refusing to hold stock
in any. as yet.
In the Neck
There's excitement in the barnyard,
There's f1utter in the coop;
There's furry around the henhouse
AS if chickens had the roup.
Feathers flying in the breezes,
Squawks are hear all round the place;
AK is smeared with blood and down, too,
Which is scattered bout the space.
Pots aboiling in the kitchen;
Something smells so fine By heck,
Now I know what's all the trouble
Turkeys got, it in the neck!
w. H. C.
INCOMES FROM PHOTOGRAPHS
AS the celebrity passed out of the
studio, the photographer gave him q
check for 5000.
He's easy" said the man. "He
ought to have copyrighted and handled
his photo himself He might have made
$500 year out of it for life. provided
that he kept on writing books as pop
MAR ag 'Tha Swami