The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1906-10-06

l
demonstrate that the trenAors are al
ways with us and to hear from IN,
lake Of molten lava that undoubtedly
boils beneath us. CcS lot hero ma,
be situated above thc very center oI
such lake"
"And the crust OF the earth may
break and let us Aown any day OF
nightl'
1T is liable to, my dear, but IL
am home 1 may yet warning in time.
And you are going to dig hole In
the back yard and llsteny"
That's what shall do, shall dig
a hole and then spread my raincoae on
the grass and lie down. | shall record
whatever feel or haar. and you may
read The Bowser Earthquake Theory
In all the newspapers before you arc
many days older. think feel a
tremor Of the earth now"
1T Is only the hired girl walking
around the Kitchen replied Mrs. Bow.
ser. Have these tremors you speak
OF anything to do with dclirium trc-
morsy'
Gave Her the Awful Look.
Mr.. Bowser stopped dead still and
gave her one awful look that lasted a
long minute. Then he tried to say
something, but words failed him. and
he went upstairs after his raiIcoat.
When he came down with ii he went
directly TO the back yard and used the
spade for about fifteen minutes. When
he had got the hole deep enough Mrs,
Bowser called to him from q back win.
dow:
II have consulted the dictionary and
found that one Is tremors and the 9TH
er tremens. Only the tyemens come
from drink. Please excuse me-"
He wouldn't do II. He lay down and
put his ear to the ground, and his the
ory began working right away. He
also began making notes and at the
end of half an hour had recorded the
following:
The smell OF acids seems to be es.
Gaping from the earth: smells like an
old wooden sock ON fire.
'If am not mistaken I hear a seeth-
ing noise, the same as occurs when a
farmers hired man spits on the family
cook stove.
The lake OF molten lava has struck
q fresh supply Of fuel and Is booming
for keeps. No wonder coal and kero-
sene are so high.
'sTremors OF the earth as the lake Is
agitated.
'I'll show Mrs. Bowser whether It's |
tremors or tremens. II is such remarks
from her that have always kept me |
back in this world.
Two tremors in quick succession,
with strong smell of burning sock.
"Hang a woman who isn't interested
In earthquakes.
"Rumblings, reverberations and
groans from the center Of the earth. |
Bowsers theory is working out to
dot.
Felt Decided Tremors.
Decided tremors passing from east |
to west, just the same symptoms as
preceded the awful disaster at st. |
Pierre. | can't say there will be an |
earthquake or volcano, but IL there is |
Mrs. Bowser needn't expect help from
me.
''The escaping gases now smell like
The bottom of vinegar barrel. The |
ire may have taken in a factory or |
.wo.
'The Bowser theory is coming right |
along, as all his other theories have.
Great rush of reporters to interview
lin tomorrow. Mrs. Bowser will not
% allowed to do any talking.
''There are sounds like footsteps
They are probably produced by the
iery pillows rebounding from the face
II granite cliffs.
"The Bowser theory
Two tramps who had been sneaking
ip the alley to find a shed to furnish
hem lodgings for the night had caugh.
light of the recumbent Mr.. Bowser
through the half open gate and stood
md watched him for ten minutes.
Then they nudged each other aud
'oftly advanced, thinking they had
'ound a drunken man asleep. They
we're bending over their victim when
le became aware Of their presence.
Both piled On to him to search his pock-
IT'S, but shaking them off he yelled for
he police and grabbed up club and
aid around him. As they fell back he
and he soon drove them out
If the yard, although they drove him
nte the honse by homhardine him with
,ans and bottles. He found Mrs, Bow.
YER still up and was carrying his
Jwelled nose and scratched face up.
stairs when she called:
''Was that an earthquake / heard
,ut there just now, dearp
"None of your businessp' he replied
Is he continued on his way.