The Owosso times. (Owosso, Mich.) 1897-1926, 1906-03-23
Bings' Bargain
BY
LAURA ALTON PAYNE
Copyright, 1906, bu Mcclure, Phillips &c Co.

NultiOCh SIlulcu.
Mammals pet mustn't be naughty"
said the pretty widow, turning her
brown eyes apologetically on Bings.
"Come to mamma, dearie. Mr.. Bings
isn't used to babies"
But the dimpled cherub, otherwise
Baby Moffatt, who had purposely and
after many backslidings climbed upon
the rustic scat occupied by Bings, for
whom she had evinced a decided par
TALLY from the start, only Struggled
the closer to the secretly delighted
Bings and cooed, "Baby 'ove Bings,"
then as happy afterthought, "Mam-
ma 'ove Bings," at which frank and
wholly unexpected revelation of her
small daughter the pretty Widows face
rivaled Bings'.
Whitlock guffawed. "Now's your
chance, Bings," he urged, with mali
cious levity at his rivals discontinue
But Bings, with a hasty adieu, fed,
leaving the cherub disconsolate.
Bipgs metaphorically kicked himself
all the way home for not taking adj
vantage of the best opportunity he had
ever had, even If it was before the
sneering Whitlock, and for his cow
ardly desertion of the pretty widow to
Whitlock's caustic raillery.
Blngs paused at his own gate and
gazed miserably at the big silent house.
He shut his eyes moment and mag
ined he saw the pretty widow and the
cherub sitting on the front porch. 1t
was blissful vision, but Bings felt
that it would never become a blissful
reality unless a miracle happened.
Bings was bachelor, Bings was big
and blond and bald, Bings was bash
ful-in fact, Bings was whole swarm
of "B's." He narrowly escaped being
beauty, with his baby complexion
and innocent blue eyes. His size was
the only thing that saved him from this
terrible fate. Moreover, Bings was a
bargain fiend. No woman could scent
q bargain sale farther off than could
Billy Bings. Incidentally Billy was
the climax to Bings' woes. But no per-
suaslon on his part could convince his
friends of the absurdity of calling a
six footer Billy.
Bings' bachelorhood was a condition
Of neither birth nor achievement-it
was thrust upon him.. During his evo-
luton into that state there had been
any one Of dozen maids and widows
that Bings would have been only too
happy to have endowed with half his
worldly goods but for his excessive
bashfulness. Never yet had he been
able to screw his courage up to the
point Of proposal, though he had made
almost superhuman efforts In that di-
rection.
undeniably cut out for Benedict. He
thought all women angels and all
babies cherubs.
AS he started uptown on the mo-
mentous morning after his precipitate
fight Bings had particular cherub in
mind-a pretty, brown eyed, dimpled
chcrub that he would have given half
he was worth to possess and the other
half to possess the cherub's pretty,
brown eyed mother. But so far every
glance from Mrs. Jessie Moffatt's ro-
guish eyes had produced the unfortu
nate effect of instantaneous paralysis
Of poor Bings' tongue, so that he could
only stand dumb or blush and STAN
mer like any silly schoolboy.
This was not the first time by any
means that Bings had performed that
feat 1t had been at least
a semiweekly occurrence for several
months past. Each time Bings vowed
that the next time he would not act
the fool. But he did. He had reached
the point where the Inevitable mental
feat was copiously punctuated with
vigorous ejaculation that would have
shocked the pretty widow had she
heard 1t.
Bngs felt his helplessness bitterly.
So absorbed was he in this thought as
he picked his way along the shady
street that he failed to observe the
widow block or so ahead of him. A
deep gloom enveloped Bings' soul that
bright June morning.
"Confound itr' he muttered. "If
doesn't happen soon ZIP
"Going. going-gonew
Bings pricked up his ears and has
tened his steps. An auction, and he |
not to know it? Turning corner, he
came full upon familiar scene just
rs n table was knocked down to- the
highest bidder. Bings' eyes gloated
over the unusual display Of household
goods spread before him.
"Fifty centsw bid q voice in the
,rowd as the auctioneer held up an
lrticle. 1t was Whitlock's voice. Bings' |
wrath famed up. and before he had
line to think he was bidding furiously |
against his rival. Fast in the grip Of |
bargain fever and whetted on by |
Nhltlock, Bings rapidly became pos
;essor Of various articles that were Of |
Is much use to him at that period Of |
lis existence as q celestial harp and |
)air Of wings. Had Bings intercepted |
he exchange of winks between Whit |
ock and the auctioneer he might have
,een more cautious. AS IL was, the |
,arricade around Bings grew and grew.
"Going, going = goner shouted the
luctioneer. "Dirt cheap at that, Mr..
3ings. Here, Sam. wheel this peram-
,ulator around to Mr.. Bings."
Perambulator! Heavens! Had he .
,0iuht n norm m hi11otoro ninUc xs,iDod