The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1906-12-02
HARD LOFOF The DEBUTANTE.
HERE SHE MUST BECOME At ONCE
A WOMAN or THE World.
No Easy Path for Her TO Obtain Social
Popularity In England thc Young GirI
In Her Mothers Tow for one season
MAKING Good" In Her First Year Out.

NhMnhbA U0Do ~ ~ NaE III
The New York Ge5utante's path IS not
always strewn with roses. Compared W..
an English d6outante her lot might alno.t
be called hard.
At her coming out tea, luncheon, dinner
or dance and for a blissful fortnight or %
afterward the de1utante herself does nc,
realize this.
Il is only when some Zig social aHalr
comes of and a debutanta finds -,'@alG
left out of the LET Of invited guests that $50
drops from her cloud OF illusion and awakes
TO the fact that the d6nutante's road Is nos
after all the easiest in the world to trayel.
From that moment care sits ON her brow.
But long Before hat care has begun 10 sit
on her mothers brow; for, as one mother
pointed out, to be the parent of a debutanu,
has its drawbacks.
In England" said she, girls are intro
duced so gradually. as a rule, that their
mothers are spared no end Of fuss and
expense, and the girl herself in the end -
by no means the loser. In fact. I am in
clined to think she is the gamer.
Take an unattractive girl, for instance.
by which I mean one who il nothing Of a
conversAtionalist, or who has not the art
OF doing and saying the right thing at the
right moment, or OF m aking herself agreeable
no matter In what company she finds
herself; who perhaps is utterly lacking in
tact, as many young girls are: who is ey-
tremely diffident In a company Of older
people, as young English girls are pretty
sure TO be. Instead Of pushing her out to
stand or fall alone. she appears first in her
mothers train at informal affairs, and her
card Is left with her mothers when the
latter makes calls. If OH such occasions
the daughter sits perfectly mum or tries tn
hide in the background no one pays any
attention to her.
1T is an exception for any one to invite
her to a large social function, where at
least half the number Of guests are far re-
moved from the debutante class. There ara
English girls out OF the ordinary TO whom
this happens, but the average debutants
just out Of schooln never has this experience.
During her first two or three months out
the English girl has a chance to gain cour-
age. to learn gradually how to doit, 20 find
herself, in fact.
And her gowns during this period are
generally Of the simple schoolgirl type.
society not apparently expecting her to
resemble an up to date fashion plate. Tbs
mother Of such a girl, ] say. has an EASY
uTne Oh ~ uuIllk me hlIiOuhCAoiy SNdko
and the girl herself a very dull time, which
saves her, however, a good many unhappy
hours later on.
In this country, especially in New York.
things are managed differently. Tho
schoolgirl must emerge into IA society
woman practically in a night. In deport-
ment and clothes almost as much is eN-
pected Of a debutante as Of a girl who has
-. n.-., .voayz and 10 Gha dnasp'e
make good, as the boys say, during her
first season her chances for a brilliant
second season are not good.
"A friend Of mine called the other day
to ask about what sort Of gowns and how
many of them she ought to provide for her
daughter, who comes out this month, and
I told her better count on as many
frocks as there are weeks in the season
she protested. Then ] went on to explain.
Tho New York debUtante is expected
to wear the highest, ARREST and freshest
of gowns made Of tulIes, laces, chiffous.
6c., materials the most perishablo and
which lose their freshness very quickly
when worn hard.
In her second season she may wear A
different type Of gown, wear gowns OF less
p~erishable variety, but she cannot do it at
the start If she would be considered well
dressed. But clothes are the least worry
ing part OF IL.
The trouble is New York expects a great
deal Of its debutantes. and some of them
don't find this out at the start. In England
a debutsnte her second season out is asked
everywhere on account of her family,
whether she il pretty or plain. dull OF lively.
Not so here's That rule only applies 10
the first three or four weeks Of her debutan'e
career, when dances, luncheons and theatre
parties are arranged specially 10 entertain
the seasons crop. the mother OF each being
expected - take a turn at the entertaining.
During this time the deburantPS are rizci
up. IL ! may use the expression, and tho-"
who fail to make themselves interesting
stand very little chance Of being asked -
important dinners. TO house parties. -
auto jaunts and that sort ofthing, no matter
whose daughters they are.
When asked what rules she would pre-
scribe for a dSbutante who would mako
good this mother answered
Most important of all she must have
something 10 say. by which | mean a SUI
hcient knowledge of current eve.ts 90 h'
listen i~nteiligently. Now this sounds easy,
but il h not. Introduced 10 the average
debutante almost every one finds that ~hH
talks weather. or the party last night, ana
these subjects failing. falls hack on I'r-nn-
alities, II she talks at all.
One OF the p~rettieat dehutluip- of at
year is, / fear, suffering an eclipse hncan-N
OF this. b will not take the troun0r -
read a newspaper or magazine, and 20
only topics she Is posted on are whore no
has been and to what entertainment s''
expects To go.
. the other hand. my little iue"r, NO
is very plain aud has no presence a. a.,
spends some time every day porting over
the spo ting columns. reading up college
news and even wading through accounts
Of financial deals and scandals, 81, = IA.
from being a good talker, her stock Of small
talk is the smallest; but because shc r"ai|y
does have a slight knowledge OF what ln-
teTests men and Of what - going ON IA
circles other han her own she l. a pTu.e
The next quality which makes fo" rup.-
larity is unyarying good humor. Indeed.
l don't know but what 7 ought to pgr t'ai
first. Not n in fifty ~dibutantes. I taInn,
IL always good humoTed in company, e."
at least is wise enough 10 keep her III uun''r
concealed.
1t il vexing. I admit. for a girl 20 got 80
cold shoulder. however unintsntloua'ly, ~
her brothers best friend: To see a girl -'"
doesn't like get more CotlllOu taNuI- fH"|