davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
THE INNOCENT BYSTANDER.
THE CHRISTMAS SHOPPER.

Up from her bed m break OF day
Filling the household with fresh dismay,
The harriod and worried air she wore
Told that her shopping was on once more.
And she flew with a rush through the
open door,
AS We knew she had done in the days OF
yore-
For Christmas was twenty days away.
She plunged anew in the shopping fray
And she sought. and puzzled. and looked
all day,
And all the next one. and all the next,
And day by day she was more perplexed
Ger gifts for friends and for foes. and
kin
She grew disheveled and pale and thin.
When Christmas was fifteen days away.
For there Is a shopping street IN town,
4 good broad highway leading down
Through rows Of present-o' ercrowded
stores
With cleaning windows and yawuing
doors.
And SWIFT she entered and ran about
And looked and p0ndered. and FASTENED
out
And Christmas was only ten days away.
With weary fingers she cIutched her list.
With haggard eyes she found all she'd
missed.
She sped from jewels % bric-a-brac,
To toys, % dresses, and hurried back.
she ached. she suffered from head 10
heels.
She lost her sleep, and she missed her
She froTaed and fumed and she rushed
like mad
To make her friends and relations glad.
And Christmas was only FIVE days away.
At last she sank with a stlhed moan.
And checked her list with weary groan
And sighed. Thank heaven. I've got
them all.
From water bottle 10 rubber ball.
From golden bracelet TO shoes Of felt.
From Jingle booklet 10 silver belt
But, Oh. my gracious she dropped the
list
And clenched her fingers into a fist,
My husbands present. I've not got
that"
She grabbed umbrella and coat and hat.
For Christmas was only one day away,
Hurrah, hurrah, for pink cravatl
Hurran for her who shopped for that,
And when her beauteous face you see
Framed by the green Of the Christmas
tree.
There. while the laughter goes to and fro,
Take down the neCktie and whisper low
This is the necktie that saved the day.
When she rushed anew TO the shopping
fray
To choose her husband a gift 10 prove
That she could arise and could get a
move
When Christmas was only 4 dav awav-,
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
SUPREME COURT SALARIES.
= plea for Larger Pay for Members
OF That Tribunal.
From the New York Herald.

from The New ! OK Herald.
The Supreme Court is the bulwark Of
the country against radical and infiamed
Congresses. against knavish and preda-
tory corporations. against States which
alarm the Executive by their Indifference
70 the federation and against executives
who might alarm the States by extreme
views as to the use Of Federal power
This great tribunal rises above political,
racial, and sectarian consideration. II is
the most powerful and important as well
as the most respected court ia tie world
The expenses Of its members in main
tanning their positions leave them little
Of their salaries at the end Of the year
The pay Of the Supreme Court and all
the Federal judges was increased a mere
pittance few years ago after very
hard legislative struggle. but II Brad
streets be correct, this compensation
should now be increased by at least one
half
Il IS high time that Congress took cog
nizancs OF this condition of affairs. In
Washington, and in large cities especial
", every consideration requires that the
Federal judges should be given compen-
sation fitting TO the Importance Of their
station and the demands made upon them
by the expenses OF modern life
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
THE RAILROAD SITUATION.
Our Highways Said TO BE Between
Roosevelt and the Deep Sea.

From the New York Sun.
The outlook for the railroads Is serious.
Such a clamor was never before heard as
has arisen for more ears Conslgnees
won't unload the cars sent to them, and
there is no way To compel them 70 do 50.
Indeed, some State railroad commissions,
quick To emulate Mr. RooseveIts ex-
ample forbid the railroads from impos-
ing demuTrage charges for delay. The
roads are between Mr.. Roosevelt and the
deep sea. The gross earnings are suffo-
eating them, the net earnings are stead
ily vanishing. and behind all is the
specter OF an intOleTable usuTpatiOn which
means only bankruptcy and disaster
Communities are bowling for coal: farm
ers are distracted for means to set their
grain to market; merchandise of all kinds
encumbers the sidings and chokes the
railroad yards. and only open weather
palliates the immediate prospect
But never mind the railroads They
have earned and they fully deserve the
punishment that IS coming 10 them II
the laws are not enforced We must make
new laws. But what we want TO know is
How does a paternal and illustTiOus ruler
propose 70 provide for the unemployed
millions who viii presently appeal TO his
omnipotence for succor2
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21

Trajectory reports regarding the japanese
advance, the Information coming from
his Chinese spies, who had evidently been
carefully coached for the purpose of pro-
volSing the Russian commander by keep
ing him up to unnecessary alertness, and
so contributing to the fatigue and dis
.couragement Of his forces. More than
this. the Russians discovered that their
screened positions were revealed to the
Japanese by the Chinese spies. and it
was OF report that the Chinese, apparently
working in the fields. Indicated TO the
japanese the position of the Russian
troops, and In this way aided the Japa-
nese gunners. There was" adds Col.
Schuyler, "at least one authentic case In
which this was true, and have copy
of a picture made from an actual pho
tograph OF the Chinese caught IN the act
of signaling with a flag to the japanese
batteries
According to the military observer. the
Chinese in Manchuria introduced an ele-
ment of great uncertainty and presented
the factor of real annoyance. against
which the Russians found It sometimes
difficult to adequately cope. II was.
altogether. a somewhat new and assuredly
interesting sidelight on the situation in
ManChuria.
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
CAPITOL GOSSIP
ForaI.er nnd the President.

Z
Senator Foraker's yelled attack upon
the President I'm the speech the facile
Ohio statesman made yesterday on the
discharge without honor of the negro
troops has called attention anew 10 the
relations between him and the Executive,
Mr.. Foraker was the first man Of com
handing influence In the cOunsels OF his
party 10 declare uncompromisingly for
Mr.. Roosevelt for President in 1904 RE
made his declaration soon after Mr.
Roosevelt had succeeded President Nc
Kinley, when Mark Hanna was generally
supposed TO be plotting against the n0mi-
nation OF Mr. Roosevelt. II was the
opening gun in the campaign which re-
suited In unanimous nomination by ac-
elamation at Chicago In June Of 1904 In
recent months the relations between the
President and the Senator may be de
scribed as one Of armed neutrality. They
have had no open quarrel, but IL is well
understood in well-informed circles that
each is eagerly watching the other and
storing away In memory incidents that
may be drawn upon ut the proper time
for political purposes. Whether the
Ohioan is a candidate for the next Presi-
Dental nomination is quite beside the
main question now. II that We're the
principal cause they would have been on
cordial terms until the President made it
evident that he favored Secretary Taft as
his successor. The breach developed be-
fore IL was known that Mr.. Roosevelt
was looking with greatest favor upon ms
Secretary Of War for the Presidential
succession, Thus the interesting question
still remains, What caused the feeling Of
antagonism between Senator Foraker and
President ROOSEVELT
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
Aged as She Travelled.

From Harper's Weekly.
DR.. Russell II. COnwel, the famous
pastor of the Baptist Temple in Phila-
delphia, I'm a lecture delivered in New
Haven not long ago. predicted wonder
full progress in rapidtransit facilities
in the near future, and at the same
time deprecated the slowness OF pres
ent railroad travel To illustrate this
point DR.. COnwell told an amusing
story OF a woman who was travelling
with her child. The train was delayed
by many tiresOme and seemingly un-
necessary stops, and when the con-
ductor was collecting fares the woman
refused To pay for her little girl
THAT child IS old enough to have her
fare paid" said the conductor, very
steTnly.
We'll. perhaps she is old enough
now. replied the woman, but she
wasn't when the train started"
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
CHICAGO.

To fashion and fancy it seems just the thing
Every season cross seas 70 sfsr go
I wonder how many have first had a fling
At that gem Of all cities-Chicago
II you wish 70 be really saw while there,
You must not let "a or mama go;
For what part have prudence and motherly care
In that upto-date Cty-Chicago?
Once Venice, We read. the bride Of the sea-
In her gondolas glided Iago-
The proud Adratic would rank "Twenty-three''
Should that sea wash the shores Of Chicago.
Now Hamlet know. IS the nOblest Of plays
MY lord. the dukes name was Gonssgo''-
But To witness play upon Life, nowadays
You must 80 to the town Of Chicago.
II order a package Of books from the press
I much prefer Adams TO Fargo;
But 70 order from Tartauls, through by express
II must come By the way Of Chicago.
Whilst romance and TeTel are ali very fine;
And sweet doth the sound Of guitar go;
SIN, looz 70 the label you have on youT wine
And draw your own cork-in Chicago
"A. s. MARYE.
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21

From the Boston Herald.
There seems to be no widespread dispo-
sition to criticise those members who
voted in favor of increasing Congressional
salaries. The only unfavorable comment
occasiOned by the record Of the voting Is
directed more particularly against those
who either lodged or voted one way viva
voce and the other way on the roll call.
The people admire frankness either ways
but they have no particular fondness for
Sneaks
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21

Senator Hale responded to a summons
to the White House a few days ago.
Senator" said the President, after
passing the time OF day with the chair
man Of the Senate Committee on Naval
Affairs there Is the draft of a bill on
the navy personnel matter which ! very
much want TO have enacted at this ses-
sion"
Senator Hale took the document and
scanned II carefully for several minutes,
pending which silence reigned.
Sounds like "a very good bin. Mr. Pres
ideut' said the statesman from Maine.
Most of the points you seem 10 have in
mind are apparently covered here. But.
Mr.. President, all legislation is initiated
by Congress Therefore, I shall have TO
wait for a bin on this subject 10 be in
PRODUCED in the regular way before / can
be prepared 70 pass Judgment upon it
Then the chairman OF the Committee
on Naval Affairs suddenly changed the
subject. and soon he proceeded with char
ac.eristically calm dignity out OF the
Executive Offices.
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
A LITTLE NONSENSE.
SOMETHING WRONG.

Now every one buys lots Of things
And no one to his money clings.
wis.
You something buy, Of course, for ma;
Something for brother. cousin, pa,
And sis
Then ma for you buys something fine,
And all the rest fail into line.
l ween.
Yet go awry things somehow do;
You later find that buncoed you
Have been.
There Is leak somewhere about.
OF that there can be little doubt.
I wot
For see-deny it If you can
You gave lot more presents than
You got
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
ONE GOOD TURNS DESERVES. sc.

Alfred. SAYS the beauteous creature.
I have a little Christmas remembrance
for you, and / hope you viii like it, al
though I know il is not half as nice as
il might be Here It is II is necktie
that l nave made for YOU all by myself
l do SO hope it viii please you"
'Thark you, Ermyntrude.' says Alfred.
with wan smile. And knowing that
you would give me something that YOU
had made with your own fair hands. I
too, have made something for you Here
it is. OF they are. just as you choose to
look at il. or them. 1t is a pair Of
gloves, really. although I confess 81 does
resemble pair Of sofa pillows. Why.
Ermyntru0e, what can be the matter?"
But ErmynrUde, with a naughty air, has
left The room. WILBUR NESRIT
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
Mr.. Bryce as Ambassador.

II is a fortunate coincidence that the
Englishman who wrote the very best
book on the American commonwealth
known to all literature is TO be appointed
Ambassador from Great Britain to the
United States. II there is one man who
ought TO be en- rapport with the Amer
lean people, their institutions, their
idiosyncrasies. and their ideals. James
Bryce is that man. He has studied us
with a friendly mind He has judged us
fairly and accurately. He will, there
fore, be accorded cordial welcome tC
the United States.
II has been the custom in the past for
Great Britain to regard the position OF
Ambassador TO the United States as APP
parently of little Importance. The Brit
ish representa- ives here, while they have
been men of fine character, have not
achieved the highest rank in diplomacy
or any other field Of service. The United
states. on the other hand. has endeavored
to send 10 the Court of ST. James the
highest types of American civilization.
These men have done much to strengthen
the ties between the nations They have
added TO the prestige OF the United States
on the other side OF the Atlantic
Mr. Bryce resigns the position Of chief
secretary TO the lord lieutenant Of Ire
land in the British cabinet in order to
accept the Enthusiastically His coming
is a noteworthy episode in our history.
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
Fairbanks "a Fast walker.

Several days ago an overfat journalist
Joined Senator Of ordinary physique and
avoirdupois In the Capitol for walk
down town. They had not proceeded far
before being overtaken by Vice President
Fairbanks. The trio glided up the Ave
nue.. with the Vice President setting the
pace The Vice Presidential legs are long
and their stride is unconsciously great
They had proceeded about two blocks
when the corpulent journalist. waddling
Ike a Strasburg goose and putting like a
porpoise allowed that ne was late, and
regretfully must take a car. The Vice
President expressed regret, declaring that
he had hoped 10 have the pleasure, &c
The fat journalist then had 10 succumb
under the established order Of things in
Washington and continue the walk.
Maybe I'm walking too fast" sug-
gested Mr.. Fairbanks.
Not al all. said he Of the co:pulency,
almost choking from the double exertion
OF keeping his breath and Of uttering a
falsehood. which the Vice Presidents eye
plainly discerned
4 slower pace was set for a block or
Two men IL Vas QulthtlFu ltltD It's ~ tri-
nal rapidity. BY this time the Senator
began to show signs Of fatigue and loss
OF breath. Luckily. the Raleigh Hotel
was reached about that juncture OF af-
fairs. and the Senator declared that he
and the fat journalist had an engagement
I'm that hosiery. would the Vice Presi-
dent excuse them. sc?
That's twice I've tried 10 keep UP
with the Vice President on the walk
home" said the Senator after Mr.. Fair
banks had gone on his way, and ,
shan't try 1t any more. He has no ides
how fast he walks, because his legs are
abn0rmally long and his stride is CORE
spondingiy great He wants 20 be s0cia-
bic and democratic and all that sort Of
thing. but he viii have 20 learn how 10
adapt his gait to that Of ordinary per
sons before ne can hope 10 he popular as
a walking companion
Saying which. while catching his breath,
the Senator then ordered something quick
as bTaccr.
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21

From the St Louis Post-Dispateh.
The statement of a statesman that I'VE
got along very well with the English
language until the reign Of the present
President of the United States is not
perfectly true. A perusal Of the large
correspondence of any large business viii
reveal that our struggles with the Ian
guage, and especially the spelling, have
been long and fatiguing.
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
shIppers Vac be nd FnuIf.

From the New York Journal Of Commerce.
There arc many indications that ship
pers are much at fault for the car short
age. not only in delaying shipments, but
in being slow about loading and about
unloading, using cars an unnecessary
length Of time on side tracks for storage.
1t is quite possible that the fault is not
entirely with the railroads, and investiga-
ton should not be one-sided
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21

From the Charleston News and Courier
Why not make Theodore Roosevelt
president Of the Canal Zone. 10 hold Office
until the completion OF the Panama
Canal, after he has served out his present
term In the White House. That would
be disposing of him in a very satisfactory
manner.
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
One Worry of the season.

From the Chicago Record Herald.
Along about this time CT the year ths
average man would be willing to pay 4
pretty large premium TO anybody who
could suggest TO him a Christmas present
for his wife that she would have no desire
to exchange for something else immedi-
ately after the passing Of the glad days
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
THAT Gets I'm.

'Dere am lots Oh folks struttin' around
VIII notes in DER eyes. declared Parson
Potluck
An beams toe" commented Deacon
JOhnsing.
"Dass right. But femme tell 20, nah
brudder. In case 90 a cinder, den you'll
see EN- PAWN
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
nut That's different.

From the Richmond Times Dispatch
Says The Washington Herald: "a Roch-
ester man IS said to take four steps a
second, five feet at stride That's prob
ably the way he takes them when get
ting out Of Rochester" But suppose he
was going from Rochester to Pittsburg-
well, what then?
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
Careful of Annearnnns.

From the Philadelphia Press
'Yis, maam," said Bridget, "T'u be
Pavin' We. l don't like thot snip of a
dude thot does be calm on Miss Mabel. f"
The idea!' exclaimed her mistress. He
doesn't call TO see you, so what"
i know he don't, ma'am. but I'm
afraid some o the neighbors might think
he does
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21

black soldiers who were dismissed. Their
conduct in the deliberate judgment Of
President Roosevelt. was criminal.
The War Department, by direction Of
the President. can permit 10 be taken
back into the army such of the soldiers
involved as II may see fit But as all Of
them have been declared by the President
70 be criminals. it does not seem likely
that he will direct that any of them be
re-enIisted. Hence, It cannot be seen how
Congressional Interference of any sort
can bring relief to the soldiers affected
by the order. 1t would, therefore, seem
best for the good of the service that the
subject be dropped.
The President is Commander-in-chief of
the army and navy, and his power as
such can be abridged only by an amend
ment to the Constitution.
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
A NinnuH Rehuke.

From the New York Press
The girl was with two young men
One was a charming fellow and the
other was a cad. The charming fell
low ordered a bottle of white wine
When the waiter poured it the cad
turned mis- glass down.
Il don't care for still wines said he
loftily.
I suppose smiled the girl, that is
because you'd like the whole dis
tillery."
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
Time.
From Puck

The Young HOstess-Papa. 1 wish you'd
request the musicians not 10 play the
dance music so fast.
Her Father-I did, my dear. but the
leader says the union calls for time
and a half after midnight
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
Facts I'm the Case.

Prom the Chicago News.
Lawyer examining witness)-Do YOU
know the man who formerly owned this
gun?
WitnesS-Yes, sir
lawyers he in the courtroom?
Witness-No, sir
Lawyer-Where is he?
Witness-I don't know.
Lawyer-When and where did you see
him last?
Witness-Six months ago-at his funeral
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
The Cost of Living.

\ member Of the Cabinet who was
frankly rejoicing the other day over the
passage by the House Of a bill increasing
the salary Of Cabinet officers from 5000
10 $1,000. declares that even with the
proposed Increase the Presidents official
advisers will not receive enough from the
government with which to meet the abso-
utely necessary cost of living here and
maintaining their positions. A thousand
dollars a month"; said he. sounds big to
the average person living the average life
Of the American citizen. II sounded big
10 me before I came to Washington as a
Cabinet officer to live. Everybody knows
l am not extravagant in my tastes, as
also, everybody knows that my wife is a
good manager Only a few evenings ago
we went over our books and accounts
and while we knew that our living ex-
penses had gone Up tremendously in
Washington, still We were not prepared
to believe that they have averaged 81. 600
a year ever since we have been here J
do not entertain as much as other mem
bers OF the Cabinet. It's because I am
not rich and also because neither my
wife nor I care much for that sort Of
thing: but in spite of this we have had
TO spend every year 5000 more than my
salary at present amounts to-
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21

We sell great quantities of fireworks
for Christmas celebrations in the South.
but practically none north Of Mason and
DiXons line" says q drummer in an In
diana paper. The reason is clear 10 every
Indiana man. Out there the people have
Senator Beverage make speeches to them
during the holiday season.
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
mod Live to Regret u.

From the Milwaukee Sentinel.
Even if the Japs should take the Phil
ippines they would be sorry for it, The
Boston anti-imperialists would begin
sending them their literature.
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21

Mr.. Roosevelt in mis- Panama message.
says that it is not unusual for men 10
grumble. and especially about their food.
when massed in large bodies. True.
Sometimes they send home round robins
about it.
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
Open Season.

a burnt child breads the fire."
What OF it,
Nothing II would be well II the
singed Santa were as sensible"
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
The Peerless Lays.

From the Portland OregunisI.
With President Roosevelt pinning the
Nobel medal on the lapel of MS Sunday
coat, it behooves Mr.. Bryan to do some
thing
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
THAT AEoni1ed oppression.

What means that glare the women
wear?'' / asked Of pretty Grace.
"Be not afraid" replied the maid
That's just the Christmas face"
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21

Senator SmoOt is to speak in his own
behalf in the Senate. and hGrd-hearted
anti-SmOOt paper out in Salt Lake Is
mean enough 10 say that he is just the
kind of client TO be his own lawyer.
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21
Firm I'm the saddle.

From the ST. Louis Post-Dispatch.
Japans great general has been thrown
from his horse and seriously injured
There is no horse that can throw our
Commander-in-chief.
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21

From the Atlanta Georgian.
Money may be easy, but the trouble is
that the man who has Il isn't.
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21

The indications are that our trusty lit
tie friend. Japan. is fixing up the open
door in the far East so that American
commerce can walk right in, and turn
around, and walk right out again
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21

Congressman Hardwick wants the rail-
roads 10 institute the block system. The
proposition viii hardly get by Uncle Joe's
block system this session.
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21

Another convincing evidence OF Japan's
rapid absorption Of modern ideas OF civil
ization IS found in the fact that a Gin
cinnati firm has just been given the right
to put up a monster distillery in the king
dom
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21

a volcano near Honolulu is spOuting
mud. fire, birthstone, and few other
volcanic adiuncts, from three cones. One
cone would not make enough noise 20 at
tract a cOrporaTs guard these days.
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21

An Indiana woman ninety-one years Of
age husked five bushels of corn the other
day and was given a kiss for finding a red
ear Girls will be girls out in IndianaE
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21

Had Congress suspected that it was TO
be swamped with language like that it
might have been more willing TO sim
plifY il
The Washington herald., 1906-12-21

( Mr.. John d. Rockefeller must look upon
/ Chancellor Day in about as favorable a
( light as the average man looks upon pay
day