The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1906-02-07
JUST FOR FUN
Te|aeksRR'aa

q bit. | got out of the way Of the fire
engine.-Punch.
Footpad-Your money or your life!
Citizen-See here! I'm a Tammany
Hall leader, and -. Footpad-Oh,
don't care where you got it'll take
it.-Puck.
He--I know lots OF women who
haven't any sense of humor! She
Well, what Of 1t? | know lots OF
men who haven't any sense at ALL
Detroit Free Press.
I'm taking my riding lessons In
strict privacy" "Why not in public?'
80 as to avoid the fierce white light
the beats upon the thrown."-Louis-
vile Courier-Journal.
Mrs. Chugwater-Have you seen
what the papers say about this
cricket pest? Mr.. Chugwater-No. For
heavens sake, is that starting up
again? / thought baseball had killed
it off.--Chicago Tribune.
Visitor-My good man. you keep
your pigs much too near the house.
Cottager-That's just what the doctor
said, mum. But | don't see how it's
agoin' to hurt 'em!-Punch.
"Cabman, Cabman! Surely you're
going out of your way?" BLESS me,
mum, you give me quite turn. I'd
forgotten all about yer, and was driy-
ing back to the stables. Punch.
DE trouble wifi many smaht young
man." said Uncle Eben, "is dat he's
tempted to rely on his ability to
frame UP excuses foh doin' his share
O. regular work."-Washington Star.
New version of Marguerite, by the
American girl
Rich man, richer man, Wall street
chief,
Magnate, CRATER, wholesale thief"
Life
81 hear you carry quite a consider
able life insurance" Yes" For
whose benefit are you insured?' Il
won't know myself until this investi'
CATION Is over. Baltimore Amerl'
can.
"He has the courage to say what
he thinks" YES" answered the
man with carping instincts, "and con
sidering how foolish some Of 1t Is. II
must take courage" - Washington
Star.
"Why do you always seek the deep
est pools?" asked the grayling. I'm
order to be where the sunshine
can't reach me-" answered the trout
II freclSle SO easily" - Chicago
Tribune
Gofer-In speaking of your auto
mobile, why do you always refer to II
in the feminine gender as she?
Shofer-Well, the auto is so hard to
manage and 80 blamed expensive!-
Brooklyn Life.
Sandy having been asked II Mr.
Meadowcroft was a golfer, replied:
"Weel, no, not a real one. He missed
a game to be at home when his sec
ond child was born" - Chicago
Record-Herald.
ct appears that Massachusetts, has
discovered, that monkeys will destroy
that pest. the gypsy moth" Il won
der if that accounts for the fact that
there are no gypsy moths at New
port t?"-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Speaking Of charity" said the
moralizer, every man should give
according to his means" True" re
Joined the demoralizers "but instead
a lot Of men give according to their
meanness. Chicago Daily News.
"Oh," sighed Mrs. Oldcastle, I'm
SO sick Of the proletariat!" $50 are
me and JOSIAH" replied the hostess
Were goin' to give 1t up and go back
| to coffee, even II 1t amt the best thing
| for the nerves" Chicago Record
Herald.
Friend-Do you think that automo
biles will eventually take the place
| of the railroads? Auto enthusiast
| (gloomily)-I hardly think so. The
railroads killed $4,000 people last
year in this country alone.-Philadel
phia Bulletin.
Il just heard of a fellow who tool
a room up at that big hotel" said the
| first summer man, "and when he got
a chance, stole a lot of money from
the other inmates" YES" said Joke
| ly, another case Of bad roomer gain
ing currency. ."-Philadelphia Ledger.
Miss Kunning-Every woman SHOULD
work hard for a husband. Mr.
Marryat-That's what | say, but my
wife's so lazy. Miss Kunning-YoI
misunderstood me. mean she shoult
work hard to get husband, but after
she gets him she shouldn't have tt
work at all.-Philadelphia Press
Mrs. Hayrlx was reading letter
! from the son, who was away at col
lege. "He wants you to send him s1(
SO he can take fencing lessons" she
said. "They amt no sense in hin
wastin' good money on fencin' les
sons" rejoined the old man. "rl
teach him haow tew make fence.
when he comes home, by grass!"-