Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-03

AN TOLD YOU CONTEMPLATE READIN'
SHAKESPEARE DIS WINTER"
president, 81 am told dat you contem-
plate readin' Shakespeare dis winter?"
eyes, sah."
Il am told dat de objeck am to i'm
prove your mind?"
eyes, sah.''
do you owe any back rent?"
1.-TWO months, 1 reckon
'Have you got in your coal for de
winterY'
"N-no, sah.'
"Have you got shoes and warm
clothes fur your chil'en?"
F'NOt yet, sah.>'
"Have you got an extra bushel OF
taters down cellar?"
mot jest yet"
''Brudder Pullback, femme give you
a tip. Shakespeare was a good man.
He was a smart man. He used up
heap Of ink and paper in writin'. Oar
hain't no question but what if you or
any Odder Guild man would sot down
and read his books for six months you
would improve your mind.
but you hain't got time, Brudder
Pullback. You has got to hustle fur
bacon and taters and clothes and shoes
and back rent. You has got to be
right on Gle hump. You may git time
to pick up somethin' by Laura Jean
Libbey or Old Sleuth, but you won't go
beyond dat.
4 shall keep an eye on you de COM
in winter, and if l hear dat your
chiI'en can't go to school fur de want
of shoes or dat you have put mort
gage on your cook stove | shall pur
coed to improve your mind in a way
dat will make your heart ache fur six
months to come.
you may now sot down, and if Ed
er Penstock am wild us tonight he
will please stand up"
The elder was there. During the last
three months he had been debating
with himself whether the earth or the
sun moved, and he was figuring on a
piece of paper when the voice of the
president reached him.
'Brudder Penstock, you has been a
member Of dis club fur a good many
years, and up to a few weeks ago L
counted you among de level headed.
What you been gettin' in your head
about de sun movin'?'
eve am told dat de airth moves
around de sun, hain't we?' queried the
elder.
"I's heard some SIGH talk
"But l don't believe dey kin prove it.
rs been watchin' things, and rs al
most believin' dht it's de sun dat does
de mOvin'."
''Brudder Penstock, s'pose you should
find out dat de airth moved around de
sun for suah-what would happen?'
"Why-why-I dunno, sab"
''S'pose you should find out de odder
way-what would happen?'
"Can't say, sah."
"NO, I reckon you can't, but I'll tell
you what'u happen if you don't drap
dis sun business and go to work. I
happen to know dat you am head ober
heels in debt and libin' mostly on dried
apples, and unless you make change
you'll get de bounce from dis Lime
kiln club in a way to take de curl
y
me or to any Odder Guild man who
has to work fur a libin', whedder de
sun or de world moves. What we want
is to be on de move ourselves. We
want to be movin' coal and Goldfish
into our cabins, and we want to see
de chiPen moyin' right along to school
cherry day.
"When our days work am done, if
any Of us am fule huff to go out and
sit on de fence to see whedder de moon
or de fence moves, OATS all right, but
we hain't gwine to waste none of de
daylight.
Oats all, Brudder Penstock, and
now have a word to say to Waydown
Beebe.
''Brudder Beebe," said the president,
''you am one of de charter members
Of dis Limekiln club You was one
of de seven Of us who met in a stable