The Minneapolis journal., 1906-07-21
With the Long Bow
---"Eye natures walks. shoot folly as II fes."
Poet -Humorist and Farmer Swap Jobs for One Day,
Ned Brown writing 'the Stuff and Doc Bixby
pailing the Cow and Cultivating the Corn.

Ed BROWN who runs a farm somewhere out
mi side of Lincoln, Neb., and DR.. Bixby, editor
l u If the Dailv Drift column in the Lincoln Jour
nal swapped work for day. Brown writing Doc 8
funny column and Doc editing the farm and curry
combng the cows. The farmer turned out a pretty
moor column of paragraphs ending with pretty good
poem, just Doc does. The poem ran thus
7 never tried my hand at writing verse, s.
Bnt I IN pretty sure I can do worse II
S. At work for Blk than Blk at work for me, =
For there in the cornfeld he IL be all at sea.
For Bixby doesn It know the cornfeld g needs;
He IL sure plow up the corn and leave the weeds
fear he'll do the growing crop much harm,
For as you know, must have brains to farm.
This ssDrft,'' however, is easy trick;
You first relate how lately you've been sick,
Give all the symptoms and the prescribed diet,
And counsel every reader sure to try it.
Then, since for you topic has a terror,
You poke poor fun at forms of ''mortal error;
3 When that is written out and sent in then you
81 Devise a most prepost 'rous breakfast menu;
And if of lacking copy you have fears,
You grab the paste pot and the well-worn shears
And clip stickful (say, this is casey
From Russell, Gillian Otus Reese;
Beef bout the beet trust, holler bout the price
The local shylocks put upon their ice.
And SO is ended all your daily tasks q
As fat take as any man should ask -
All Of which we consider pretty good farming, the
the editor of the paper claims 1t sWeaJ the potato
digger considerably to do it. .
Meantime "Doc'' had hied out to the farm In
the morning his manly form pred out of bed with
difficulty by the hired at 43o and the cheerful
music Of the milk Of dozen COWS as it hit the bot
tom of the tin pail was heard for an hour or two.
Then came breakfast. Here the editor at home.
From to 1850 the great joy of cultivating
few million of extending far the hori.
zon. From 1l:30 to l, the poet rested up and did
valiant service at dinner. From l to 6 Doc ran
sulky rake and gathered up the horses breakfast
food for next winter. At pm the edtorpoet shone
nightly at the supper table, After that he tried to
read the weekly paper but so blame tired that
he fell asleep the sofy in his stocking feet and
slept so vociferousy that the fire shovel Jared
from it's place In the chimney and fell with
clatter. ..@
The next day the two parties got together and
decided to stick to their games, their wives
advised in the first place. -. II
Teacher was giving her little object lesson on the
s1Now, children, you tell me wherein
(Eager waving g, of hands) T..
'tYes, that right.''
tfAnd face''
eyes. And wherein am I different from the
clocks'' -*..
'The clock down.
The humor OF this subtle that it not
appreciated in the place of its inspiration, but teacher
had to tell it later, where it was much enjoyed
Chicago paper devotes three-fourths of a column
on it's front page to interview with Miss Giua
Morosini, daughter of millionaire New York banker,
who explains in detail how she manages to keep
her dress account below 100000 year. It takes
selfdenia to do it, but Giuia does it. We keep
pantaloon account down to about $l2.75 year, but
don brag about it in the society columns.
A ~..@
Do you ever grit your teeth and hold Tight
While doing so it may be well to remember in case
the teeth pull out push in that Philadelphia has
the largest plant for the manufacture of teeth in the
known world If you do not raise your bites, the
chances are that they are Philadelphia made.
The nature of the tooth composition, which resem
bles plaster of paris, is factory secret When the
composition is in the mold it is placed in oven te
be hardened From the it travels to another
r1zyho &r1,oc fho olo 1Io
it into the finished TOOTH Then it goes to the fur
to receive the final baking at tremendous heat
After that the girls get in their fine work polish
Ing and finishing and examining for defects Some