West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1906-01-18

himself and we herewith publish it
as making good reading and giving
some insight into matters of that
period not generally known at this
late date.
June Ist, Year 3I88.-Got up
late this morning with a headache.
Had two or three 'bear. dances" in
he family. last night. Had to hus-
tie out three times after the old
women OF the neighborhood. The
family physician says he must have
help.
june 5.-Big strike threatened
among the working men on the
Temple. Sent in a demand for
eight hours per day and raise of
FIVE shekles per week, and their pay
every Saturday evening. Have re-
fered the matter to Hiram with in
structions to bring in non-union men
from Tyre. Expect trouble.
June Io.-Received a letter from
the Queen of Sheba; wants to come
to Jerusalem, Sends her picture,
and she is peach. Haven't ans
wered the letter yet. My wife who
was Pharaoh's daughter found the
picture in my pocket and declares
she "will scald the hussy if she
comes to see me-" Don't know yet
how I will manage it.
June Is.-Met nurse girl on the
street with pair OF twins in baby
carriage and asked her whose pretty
children they were. Said they were
mine and their mother wife number
ISo that l married last summer
when on little vacation up in the
mountains of Lebanon. Her father
keeps lot of dogs and guns and
lives in the heart of the game
country. Also has some more good
looking girls. Think l will take
another little vacation this sum mer.
June I8.-Town meeting held at
the Mayors office to appoint COM
mittees to get up big Fourth of
July celebration. Have been asked
to preside and introduce the speak
ers. Hiram, of Tyre, selected to
read the Declaration of Indepen-
dence. Big sham battle between
the men just back from the forest of
Lebanon and the new levy Just
raised under Adoniram. Great fire.
works display at night.
June 2I.-Col. Tom Hassan was
here today representing John J.
Stump & Co. taking orders for fire.
works for the Glorious Fourth.
Gave him an order for 10 dozen
pints and case of "Wilson, that's
ALL" Looks like we will have a big
time.
June 23.-Another carload of
sawed cedar in from Tyre for the
Temple. Boss carpenter reports
most of it under length. Consider
able trouble owing to his desire to
short change me in this contract.
June a5.-Married four times to-
day. Two brunettes from Moab,
one auburn and a sorrel. Am
afraid I'll have to hire a new best
man. Party now holding the job
complains of overwork.
June ao.-Looking over family
today l took note that brunettes
predominated. Decided to even up
the color scheme trife. Fired the
following telegram to Hiram /;
"Please forward promptly one
blonde wife. Unless absolutely
necessary don't send per-"
June Gotham don't know
much about business abbreviations.
just got query from him by wire,
collect:
"Per what2"
Wired back this answer:
Peroxide, of course"
Consider Hiram a pretty dumb
proposition.
July 3.--Blonde arrived o. X.
Looks like the genuine article, but
can't be sure these days. Good
many drug stores IN Tyre.
July4.-Took advantage of Glori-
Gus Fourth to be married a couple
of times. An informed that / lost
several children and a brother. in
law by premature explosion of toy
cannon and Roman candles. CTo
ascertain name OF late brother in
law might know him personally j."
July 8.-Family physician reports
good news from wives %, I34 and
$40, merely two girls and a boy.
Think ri order a private census.
July II.-CompIetely surprised
by results Of census. Counting out
possible ringers, census enumerators
report total Of 63o wives--at least
IS more than had expected. Must
be a good many strangers among