Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-06-03
THE SAGE BRUSH PARSON
BY A. B. WARD.
1eo5b Little. BROWNE Company
BY A. B. WARD.
Copyright 1905. by Little Brown Company

family go to his church. 1 won't mix up
In any such business
Poole was proposed as a substitute
He'll rub it in" unused Shed I'D let
the parson down easy"
Aloud he added, well, I'll do 1t. provided
mat You put me on the other committee |
| deliver 1t -
The proposition was accepted. Every
one was tired of the discussion and inpa-
tient Tor the informal hour which followed
the members smoked while one told
up the drinks" thereby insuring
the appreoiatiye atmosphere so necessary
TO the raco1teur.
II was Shed WeIlrnan's turn that night.
When the rest of the company were estab-
llshed. with their glasses and their pipes
he began, little hurriedly for a man at
ease with himself and them
Boys, I'm goin' to tell you a true story
ana III bet you'll say when l get through
it's as good 5 a lie
Don't YOU fool yourselfi'
Not by damn sight,'
Wait till l get through before you hoI-
Ter, Shed went on. You'll think it's a lie,
anyway"
This sounded more promising A purr of
appreciation ran through the company. Cit
at it, they cried
You know Dick" pursued the story tel
Ter.
'Cussin' Dick?" they queried
Yes. The story's about him."
He's the feller that got doped," said one.
No, married" said another
They're both the same thing said a
third
Go on, Shedr called the rest
s's been actin as foreman on my ranch,
as some OF you know (You keep still till
l get through And ever since he come
there my wife wouldn't go near the ranch
for fear she'd overhear some of his remarks
Resi- I To. do
throw rope. Did it all with cuss words.
If any of you ever him" Shed paused.
We've seen him." said one.
Heard him." corrected another.
We'll, after he got through marryin' and
unmarryin'. he got religion"
Dick Religion shouted half a dozen.
I'm givin' 1t to you straight" Shed de-
clared. You go over to the Methodist
Church Sundays. you'll see him regular as
the day comes round. Well. last week /
rldin along. and off In the middle of
a pasture | see Dick sittin his bronc. sayin'
nothin Once in a while he'd give the crit
ter a clip or dig with spur. and up
would go the bronc's heels. That's as far
as they'd got.
Hullo. Dick. says I. what's the
trouble? He kinder laughed the way he
does. a-humpin his shoulders. Parsons
cut off my swearr says he. an l amt
worth a-h-m-to make this HIM, h-m GOT
says he. We've got to get acquaintsd all
over says he. The bronc thinks l don't
mean a Nm WORD say wen. sir, that
afternoon he went In to see the parson and
back he come!
You parallelipipedonr he yeiis. You
isosceIes triangler and that bronc lit out
like the devil was after him. What's that
mean. Dick?' says i. Do you known Keep
STILL says he. 4 don't know. but neither
does the bronc. He thinks I'm cnssin. Par
son got the words out of the dictionary.
There was lot more, but / can't re-
member 'em all Hy-potty-noose was one
OF 'em.''
The story-teller paused for recognition.
Ned Wilkins laughed approximately. Those
who had confidence in Ned's ability to see
the point laughed with him.
Wlnsiow smiled indulgentiy- Those to
whom he was all oracle measured their
response by his.
IT don't suppose 1t makes any difference
what words you use il your intentions are
good said Barker who had posted his
letters and returned.
This led to discussion as to what ex-
pletives We're inevitably "cuss words"
what were the several grades and degrees
ing was commendable, when superfiuous
what il implied on the part of the swearer
wherein and how far It should be resent
ed by the one sworn at Afterwards they
disbanded, promising 10 meet at Poole and
Pitchers the next day and select a design
for the medal
II was grotesque enough TO satisfy the
most exacting big as a soup plate and in
scribed.
..To the Reverend Clement Vaughan, F.
r. H. S.. T. r. A. s., F. r. NJ s., F. G. S.,
NJ. " I.
Champion Liar
From the Sazerac Lying Club
Poole and Jones laughed themselves sick
over It.
Shed looked gium. ats the sort Of thing