The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1906-05-16

an adversary since the first. If l do not
remember every one till the last. then
I am a brute"
"Iou are what l said-the' best hus-
band in the world" said Mrs. Bowser
as she walked with him. Il hope you
didn't pay too much for these beautiful
things"
"They were one of my bargains, dear
I was looking around for something
when l came to an auction place. They
put up the articles and l bid them of.
l got for $40 what would have cost me
seven or eight hundred dollars at any
tewelry store. That is one Of the things
that please me. What in blazes ails
that Internal old cat?"
Mrs. BOwser Has Doubts.
Thu feline vas trying to suppress q
giggle and rolling over and over on the
floor to do 1t, while a shadow Of doubt
| had chased the smile from Mrs. Bow
ser's face.
Think Of it. dearie," said Mr.. Bow
se~r-"seven or eight hundred dollars
worth of diamonds for only twenty! I
never could have got them in the world
II the auctioneer 4adn't had consump-
ton and wanted to close out his bust
ness and go to Florida"
"And-and You are sure they are
, genuine diamonds:"
"As sure as sure. The man warrant
| ed them white stones Of the purest wa
ter, and dying men don't lie. You can
| fash them under the noses of all the
women III the street and be sure that
they are the real thing. The ring seems
a bit large for you."
"Yes; it is"
1.-THE jewelry store on the next block
, open. Let me take the ring and run
| down there and have it fixed. I'll take
the other things as we'll, as l want to
be revenged on the jeweler. l wanted
to buy a ring of him. and, although the
stone was hardly half the size Of this,
the swindler wanted 1926 for it. l told
him then he was IL robber."
Went to the jewelers..
! When Mr.. Bowser had gone the cat
looked ut Mrs. Bowser in sorrow and
pity, but could not make her under
stand that shingles were about to be
torn off the roof. Five minutes after
leaving the house Mr.. Bowser was say
ing to the jeweler:
II want this ring made a trihe small
er, and l hope you can do it while l
watt"
80 you bought one, did you:" was
Qucriel as the man made a brief in
spection and began to grin.
"As you see. ! also bought this pin
and this bracelet"
Eyes? l can fix the ring to fit. but
why do so:"
"What do YOU mean by that?"
"Why it is only a plated ring, with a
rhinestone in it, and 1t is a poor stone
at that. II you wanted anything Of
that sort. why didn't you say so? The
other pieces are just the same. Where
did you pick them upY"
His Face Turns White,
DO you mean to tell me-" replied
Mr.. Bowser as his face began to turn
white. that it is pinchbeck jewelryy'
1T is nothing less, and l presume
you bought it ut auction. Honestly,
now, what did you pay for it?"
ut c~an't-can't be pinchbeck!
"But 1t Is. Didn't your wife spot 1t
at once?"
man for a long minute and wondered
how he could murder him quickest.
Then he raped on the showcase with
his knuckles and hoarsely whispered:
Don't toy with a desperate man."
"And You hadn't better toy with any
more ~auctioneers. If you don't believe
what l say take your stun elsewhere.
Even a longshoreman would spot the
rhinestones. What's the trouble with
you? Instead of coming to a RESPONSE
BILE person when you want
Calls Jeweler Villain.
"Sir, you are II villain" gasped Mr..
Bowser.
And you are u sucker!"
Mr.. BOwser had nc bomb, bayonet or
stilettO, and he took his anniversary
presents and started for home. He
had five minutes in which to mediate.
He assembled the steps. unlocked the
door, and. striding down the hall. he
confronted the guilty woman and thun-
dered:
woman. | have discovered YOU"
NnAC on eartn 40 you mean: re-
piled Mrs. Bowser.
II mean that Il train leaves the depot
for the town in which your mother
lives at 10 o'clock in the morning. l
mean that YOU will take it. l mean
that our respective lawyers will ar
range about the divorce and alimony.
I mean-I mean
And he dashed the rhinestone jewel
~ on the floor and jumped up and
down on it and uttered cuss words, and
then strobe into the library and slam
med and locked the door. His twenty
second anniversary had been Il sue
cess. NJ. QUAD.
The S~teeplechaae.
ANgEH j, .tn