New-York tribune., 1906-06-19
RA1J,AD OF VEGETABLES.


potato went out on mash
And sought an onion oea; the souasb
Go 'way!' the onion. weeping. cried;
The q1r pumpkn lpkh be e'it, your lawful bride
You cantaloupe with me-
But onward still the tuber came
And lay down at her feet;
And it will smell as wheat;
And l, too, early rose,
So don't turnip your lovely nose.
But spinachat with me-
ST do not carrot all to wed,
So go. sir, If please!
The modest onion meekly said
Go. think that you have never seen
Too long a maiden 1 have been
For favors In your rye!
"Ah spare a cussr' the tuber prayed;
my cherryshed bride you'll be;
You the only weeping maid
And as the willy tuber spoke
He caught her by surprise,
And. giving her an artichoke,
Philadelphia Record.
A preacher in Leavenworth, Kan. is evidently a
believer in advertising On the scoreboard OF last
Sundays baseball game appeared this notice: IF
you are fan go to the Presbyterian church to-
night and hear the Rev. DIR. Elwood line out few
hot ones"
By the Aid of scisnce,-Th fair amateur palmiss
looked at the left hand of the sweet young girl
oRFTFeathlessiy she waited for the palmists next
"Ahl I see by your hand that you are engaged
to aoW Pe wonderfui exclaned the brideto-be
And" continued the reader of the future and
dPe aRs engaged gass ID to MR. Mp Leony ' see Una. you
bluShns 's siT RsF'sf Gcw could You know hat the
By long study do of tt the S was the fs reply
"Who said anything about lines?" replied the
uhatic with whitening You are
wearing the engagement ring I returned him three
weeks agor'-Answers.
Among some other distinctions. Paris may boast
Of possessing probably the oldest cab horses in the
world in active service, according TO THE London
Globe" To be precise. the animals claim should
perhaps be stated to be that of being the cab
horse with the longest working record In that ca
pacty We all have heard of the London cab
horse which suggested to Mr.. Pickwick his famous
note upon the tenaeity of life in horses under
trying circumstances but it may be doubted
whether that long suffering beast possessed
the record of Chocolat. his Partisan successor. Five
six years are regarded as the longest period
which a cab horse be kept going in Paris, but
Chocolat has been going without a days break. for
fifteen years. is going yet. and for aught know
his may before long suggest hints to the
scientists on perpetual motion. His driver is a
proud Jehu, who has just been decorated by the
Animals Protection Society.
Smart Lawyer.A gentleman dying left all his
turn of his only SON. who was then abroad. the
worthy fathers should give him whatever they
went to the monastery. and received hut n small
share the wise monks choosing to keen the rreafsr
part for themselves The young man consulted his
friends. and all agreed that that there was no remedy
At last barrister, 10 Whom he happened to men
and promised to gain his case. The gentIeman
followed this advice and the suit terminated In hts
favor through the management OF the advocate
who grounded his plea upon this reasoning:
The testator" said the ingenious barrister .'has
left his that share of the estate which tba
monks should choose; these the express words
of the will. Now x is plain what part they have
chosen by what they keep for themselves My
client then. stands upon the words of the will
Let me have says he. the par, they have chosen
and am satisfied "-Tit-Bits.