The Manchester journal. [volume] (Manchester, Vt.) 1861-current, 1906-05-03
Cbistles.

W. NJWF hN@ hHtsstR"AN w t~sf NfFN tstFSA'
a ihs g,otlashefs u thai istAoen
The Isasa.st ia yeus TIE VIE
E,s--Did wAasi The hs'tsr--fisa
ihsi hhif "a u shs filFpnT hattsD :
Cbolly-~i'd nnrhh mhrry wpman
Who vas msos elFFsh iAaaH ny,si. y
know. Dolly ~ ypg'Ee DECIDED "
remain baebsioF. sh
- an TOD professor, ihai yoa hsfe
,nss1red ncaiy al - ibe assasFu iaa.
rsAges. All issi iao. NJ ~ttf's sben
80 mlrs " he baby and iAc failfpaS
brAsemkAs.
w. Bodice -PAps, vhai il graf Pa
ps-it u grissnF somsthisg bocnasf
yea arr ID q POSITION w. "a a. A-'aehst
--Thsn as ! grating sksn yoB place
me eses pour Ibec ia potiisea 70 get
H.
What snakes you think lhsi MAre
u inhsbilaisd Ny oorresPoDdenet
wsih she editor ~ ihe magazine write
far. answered. ihs professor. lie ssys
taAi L she only view which has any
popular iaiaresi.
--Fsihcr lsierniy) Now, sophia,
solRsihing maa b. done 10 reduce
yoar c,penses Yoa are actually
spending mora than your allowance.
DAsghicf II isni my fault, father,
I've done my best 70 gci you 10 IN
crease i.
-Tem---l slways bate 10 pass an zee
cream saloon ehen I'm walking With
my girl. D.ck--l never happened TO
pass one. Tom oui Hos do
you manage 10 Dick-l don, man.
Age III she docs. She always insists
upon going IN.
.TeAnber-I wonder how many Of
you remember lhn pretty story 81 Al
asidin and the sondortnl lamp ] told
yoa Last weck. Billy Blocker, can you
tell nac Why our little friend Aladdin
rubbed bis lamp 7 Billy Blocker lyag'
uelyl--if be wuzn'i geitin sleepy, he
mus.A had cinder In il.
Remember you have sworn TO tell
the whole truth. said the lawyer fierce
ly. Here goes. then. You are an i'm
pertinent, incompetent, oyerbearing
AZ this point the lawyer appealed to
The conri. Well. resumed the witness,
smArting under Judicial rebuke, the
whole truth il considerable, and be.
gan in the handiesi place.
Mr.. Gardner Wen, dear, how are
The tomatoes you planted Mrs. Gard
ner-0h. John I'm afraid wen have
10 buy what We need this year. Mr.
Gardner Why, how's that, Mary
Mrs. Gardner recollected today that
when did the planting | forgot 10
open the cans.
Talking Of iha, banque, last night,
said Holmes. | suppose you heard
some fine language. Yes replied Lush
man. heard some fine language this
morning that affected me very much.
This morning : Yes. II was ten dol.
lars and costs.
My invention viii increase your
Income By millions. said the mechani-
cal genius. don't want my income
increased. answered Mr.. Dustin Stax.
|, Is exactly right AS il is, big enough
10 buy everything want and small
enough 10 keep grand iurics from
being inquisiiive.
Dora How Is !, the play you gave
was not 50 well attended as the one
you gave awhile ago 7 Dolly Well,
you see, we went around and sold
tickets to all our friends for the first
performance, and-er-after that we had
no friends.
Hewitt understand that you said
that was the biggest liar that you
ever met. Joweit- Wen, you must re-
member that never knew Ananias.
The other day two good looking
old ladies entered prominent bank.
One Of them wanted a check cashed.
But said the cashier, don't know you.
You'll have to get some one TO idcnti-
~ you. My friend here viii identify
me, said the lady. But don't know
your friend, said the cashier. Well,
said the lady, with whitening smile,
III introduce you.
"A litile girl asked her mother II
there were any men in heaven. Nam
ma, she said, ! never saw picture OF
an angel with beard or musiache.
DO men ever 40 % heayen' oh, yes,
replied her mother; men 60 TO heaven,
but il always by close shave.
--Georve, yop may boast as much as
you like about your mothers cooking,
but thai lss, piece Of cake she gave me
tasted like wood. She didn't use any
recipe for that, did she No. Mother
always made her cake oui Of her own
head.
When | was your age, Tommy,
bad no mother and father. Strangers
took care o. me. and they beat me and
didn', always give me plenty 10 eat.
But now you've 60, J, nice with us.
bis son replied, and mamma gives you
something 10 cal three times q day.
But, argued the young man, you
know that Two can live on wha, il costs
W support one. That settles your
ease, groaled her father. Nobody fool
enough 10 aecep, thai statement could
ever earn living FOR one.
Kind Lady Bu, why DO you bcg'
Can't you earn living The Hobo
dnnno. mA'Am. Kind Laiy--you ,
don't know ! nobo--No, ma'Am !, |
keeps me 20 bnsy beggin' dat amt .