Los Angeles herald., 1906-03-25

keS9GSi nouncng that the next hymn would
C@&&8j be "Kinkering kongs their titles
take" Of course, what he really
meant to say was, "Conquering kings their IT,
ties take"-the first line of the well-known hymn
but the amusing slip of the tongue was not
forgotten by the undergraduates present, and
ever since similar mistakes have been known rs
"Spoonerism," after the name of the cleric in
question, who is now Canon Spooner
There is another story told OF a clergyman
who, noticing the sleepy condition of his audi
ence at the end of particularly long and dry
discourse, soIrowfully observed that he was ad-
dressing "beery wenches." This is the Spoon
erism of weary benches"
An Oxford don mystifed porter by ordering
him to put 1.-TWO bug and a rag in the town
drain for London" When it was explained that
the reverend gentleman wished him to deposit
two rugs and bag in the down train for Lon
don" the recovered Oxford dons, how
ever, are beginning to resent the fathering upon
them of every conceivable form of Spoonerism.
II is said that fair American visitor to the
ancient University town expressed her bitter
disappointment because all the fellows and tutors
spoke perfect English. In her mind dons and
Spoonerisms were inseparable.
But all Spoonerisms do not owe their origin
to clereymen. A witness informed county court
Judge the other day that he was by trade a
"stopplebotter." Then there is the story of
he never dealt with him now. ooh, prefer to
steal at the doors" the airy rejoinder. An
explanation elected the fact that he meant to IN
dcate that he preferred to IDEAL at the stores ~
What is probably the most amusing Spoonerism
must be credited to country clergyman In the
course Of solemn exhortation, he said: Each
of you, my dear brethren, must have known at
one time or another what it is to have half
warmed fish in your bosom" The startled con-
greration regained their composure when the
preached substituted "halfformed wish" for
'half-warmed fish" 1t may have been the same
minister who announced that "the sermon for
next Sunday will be screeched by the Rev. john
Crelse" The ludcrous mistake was accentuated
by the fact that Mr. Creke was the possessor ct
hgh-pitched voice, which racked the nerves
of those who had the courage to face one Of his
sermons.
Shoppers, in the hurry and excitement of win.
ter and summer sales, often perpetrate Spoon
ersms. The man in charge of the refreshment
department of q large London emporium was
asked not long ago by tired victim Of great
sale" for "a bath Of milk and glass bun" What
she really wanted was glass of milk and a Bath
bun" Another demanded 10 be shown Some
of that stink puff" pointing at the same time TO
a bale Of pink-colored cloth. third person
ordered two pounds of ''jamson dam" to be sent
at once. This is not an Indian delicacy. 1t is
merely the Spoonerism of damson jam. But the
shop assistant must have been shocked to hear
such an expression from an old customer.
The small crowd of women were discussing the
approaching meeting at the door of the hall,
when a fussy gentleman rushed up. "Sew the
ladies into their sheets!--sew the ladies into
their sheets" he exclaimed irritably And when
the stewards had recovered their equilibrium,
they conducted the ladies to their seats, taking
it for granted that this was what the old gen
tleman really meant. Otherwise there might
have been complications.
'rNy friends, can you not imagine the presence
Of showing leopard?" said preacher to his
congregation not long ago Everyone smiled
though all readily interpreted his Spoonerism
rightly.