davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24
Real Genius.

"Let me see," began the man who
had returned to the old village after
an absence of twenty years. what
ever became of your younger boy
the one you used to call a mechanical
genius?''
"Why, he went to town years ago."
drawled the old farmer. "He's doing
we'll, too"
"You don't say? Did his mechan.
zeal genius stick by him?"
"Sure. He's a big man in politics
these days"
''But where does the mechanical
part come in?'
"Why, he made several strong ma
chines,' stranger, in his party. Didn't
you read it in the papers go
Daily News.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24
On Safe Side.

There was hustle and commotion in
Bildervant home. Servants were dart
ing hither and thither, getting the house
in order for the ladies' afternoon ell
chre party. Little five-year-old Hen
rietta assisted in the preparations. She
removed all the umbrellas from the
stand and hid them in the storeroom.
Surely, Eta, you are not afraid that
the guests would carry off the umbrel-
lasr'
mo, mother, but they might recog-
nize them. Philadelphia Ledger.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24
The Cars Timber Treasure.

Few people who have not Travelled
about the Russian empire can imagine
how boundless is it's wealth in timber
wooden Russia" is the name applied
to the vast forest areas Of Russia in
Europe, which cover nearly 100000
acres, or SO per cent. of the entire area
of the country.
In Russia houses built of any other
material than wood are almost I'M
known outside the cities, and wood
constitutes the principal fuel. The
forest belt called the "Taiga," in ST.
IBERIA, stretches in a direct line from
the Urals to the Pacific for 1000 miles,
and is in many parts 500 miles broad.
All this is the property of the car
Exchange.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24
How He Assisted
A Bas hfuI Lover
N absentminded clerpvnon tolls

Y N absentminded clergyman tells
~ how once he was unconsciousIy
\ responsible for helping bashful
lover. His mind was filed with a sub
tie theological problem when a neigh
boris daughter passed in company with
diffident youth. His thoughts were
interrupted as she called out to him:
''Oh, doctor, we are just going for a
ramble. Won't you join us?"
with pleasure Do you want the
ceremony in a church,"
The bashful lover was suddenly fired
with an enthusiasm that four years Of
gnawing at his heartstrings had failed
to arouse, and he fairly shouted:
Eyes, yes, and if Maud consents the
sooner the better" New York Times.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24
Killed, Anyhow.

Gunbusta-Well, well! Why, man, l
heard you were killed in the Philip
pines!
Old Soldier-You were misinformed,
for
Gunbusta Gnterrupting - And I'm
downright glad Of it.
Old Soldier-As 1 was about to say,
you were misinformed, for it was in
Cuba that was killed.-Woman's
Home Companion.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24
A Hard Prnnnaitinn-

Hawker-I am introducing a new
kind of hair brush which
Business Man Gmpatiently)-I've no
use for hair brush. Can't you see
I'm bald?
Hawker-Yes, sir. You're good
lady, perhaps
Business Marshes bald, too, ex-
cept when she goes out.
Hawker-Yes. sir. Child at home,
probably
Business Man-Only a month old.
Bald, too.
Hawker-Tes, sir. You keep a pet
dog; maybe
Business Man-We do, but it's a
hairless dog.
Hawker tfespa~Aseiy)-Ca 1 sell
you some fly baper?-Chicago Journal.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24
ITEMS OF INTEREST.

CWO UT TN Ines
AS many as 4,061 muscles have been
counted in the body of moth.
High born Siamese walk with the
elbow joint turned inward and the
thumbs out
Out of 1,54S,654 votes polled in the
recent election in Mexico only 92,172
were against Diaz.
Swedish school children, under the
guidance Of their teachers, annually
plant about 100000 trees.
Between TOnopah and Manhattan,
New, fifty miles, there is an automo-
bile service. Round trip, $25.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24
Doubtful Testimonial.

Drug Clerk-That middle aged man
who bought a bottle Of our famous
hair restorer two weeks ago was in
again today.
Proprietor he want another bot
tie?
Drug Clerk-No; he wanted a wig
Chicago News.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24
Philadelphia Nomenclature.

A young woman from Philadelphia
was visiting in this city recently.
When asked what she would like for
breakfast she replied:
"A few half-smokes and a plate OF
fitch are delightful. We have them
once a week at home"
Her hostess was puzzled by the un-
expected answer: "Half-smokes and
fitch" she had never heard of, but
from the tone of her guest they evil
IDENTIFY were palatable dishes.
"Oh, yes, forgot that you use diff
ferent names for half-smokeS and
fitch here" said the young woman,
when asked to be explicit. II think
you call them frankfurters and bacon
here. New York Post.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24
DISCRETION.

'Why did you insist on only $4,000 a
year as your salary?'
Because" answered the high fnan-
cier, "as soon as people hear a hundred
thousand mentioned they get suspi-
cious. 1t is better to keep the figure
marked down a little" p Washington
Star.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24

Professor T. S. Adams, of the depart
ment of political economy of the Uni
versigy of Wisconsin, will speak on
"Some New Phases of the Labor Pro
blem."
Friday the Rev. e. G. Updike will
open the annual business session with
an invocation, which will be followed
by officers reports, election of officers
and of delegates to the national con-
vention at Boston March 6, and two
addresses, one by the state president,
Mrs. B. G. Gudden of Oshkosh and one
by E. W. Frost, Milwaukee, chairman
of the Wisconsin Child Labor commit
tee.
OFFICERS OF WISCONSIN ACADEMY OF
SCIENCE.
Professor Louis Mahlenberg of the
department of physical chemistry at
he state university was elected presi-
dent of the Wisconsin Academy of
Science, Arts and Lottors at it's thirty
sixth annual meeting at Madison last
week. Other faculty members of the
university who we're elected to Office
are as follows: G. e. Allen, assistant
professor ofabotany, secretary, r. Fl.
Denniston, instructor in pharmacenti-
cal botany, treasurer; Walter H.Smith,
university librarian.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24
The Proper Place.

people are just crazy to get to that
place."
II don't see anything very attractive
about it. What kind of a place is it,
anyway
"It's an insane m."-Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24
How Demands Are Created.

The little boy near the foot of the
class had not been bringing his PEN
MES to Sunday school regularly, so the
teacher, feeling that, though the mat
ter were delicate, yet she should file
some sort of remonstrance against this
neglect Of the practical side of Sun
day school attendance, said:
"Charles, you have not been bring
ing a penny here of late. 1 wonder
why?'
I'm savin' me money" he replied
proudly.
"But for what?' asked the teacher.
I'm savin' up ter buy copy Nv dat
book de preacher said shuddent go in
ter Sunday school lib'ry. 1 bet OATS
a peach book all right" Judge.
Methusala was all right, you bet
For good old soul was he,
They say he would be living yet,
Had he taken Rocky Mountain
Tea. j. T. Bennett.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24

Have you been betrayed by promises
of quacks, swallowed pills and bottled
medicine without results except a
damaged stomach. To those we offer
HOLSTERS Rocky Mountain Tea 80
cents. j. II. Bennett.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24

Mothers can safely give Foley's
Honey and Tar to their children for
coughs and colds, for it contains no
opiates or other poisons. J.T. Bennett
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24

Good looks bring happiness. Friends
care more for us when we meet them
with clean, smiling face, bright eyes
sparkling with health. which comes by
taking HOLSTERS Rocky Mountain
Tea. 80 cents. j. T. Bennett.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24
Too Effective.

DO you believe in advertisingY"
mo, sir; I advertised for a wife
once"
"And didn't you get her?'
eyes, l got her." = Philadelphia
Ledger.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24

The most reliable preparation for
kidney troubles on the market is
Foley's Kidney Cure. IT. Bennett.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24

A Greene county (Nfo) farmer has
rugged his farm wagon up with a gaso-
line motor and runs into Springfield
auto STYLE
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24
Time Table.
Specht's Ferry Time Table,. M. &
St. Paul Ry.
Time Table.
WEST BOUND.

~ e@uI ANys
WEST BOUND.
No. 3-7:49 a. m. Stop for points north and
west OF North McGregor. Passenger. Ex-
cept Sunday.
No. 91-Freight, 1925 a. m. Except Sundays
No. 25-12:52 p. m. Except Sunday. Passenger
No. 69-Freight, 2:40 p. m. Sundays only
EAST BOUND.
No 92-Freight, p. M, Except SUNDAYS.
No. 1855 p. m. Stop for points beyond Sa-
bula, Iowa. except Sundays. Passenger
No. 32-8:O5 pm. Except Sunday Passenger
No. 62-Freight. Sis p. M. Sundays only.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-24

Ledger.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-03-24
DON'T DO IT, BOYS.

No matter how much liberation
may be shown for the practice sc
common with many boys and your
men in referring to their fathers as
the old man." there is never any
excuse for utilizing like designa-
ton for their mothers. Common us
age has somewhat altered the i'm
piled meaning in the term 'Fthe old
man, " and although it often CRATES
harshly on the ears of refined peo-
pie, and especially the elders who
were not accustomed to such APP
parent familiarity in their own
younger days, it is doubtless true
that in majority Of cases no real
disrespect is intended. In fact 1.-The
old man. has become an expression
quite commonly used to designate
the one in authority by those who
are closely associated with him, and
thus it is frequently heard in refer
ring to the manager Of a store, the
head OF department in any line of
business, in fact the director Oh
manager Of operations in any under
taking where a number of persons
are employed, and likewise to the
heads Of business concerns. Very
frequently it is applied to men who
are far from old in years, and often,
in fact, the ones SO designated are
much younger than some of those
who usa the term. Thus it has
come about that following the same
practice some of the young men,
with no notion of disrespect, oc-
caslonally are to be heard referring
to their fathers as ."the old man,
apparently led to the belief that
this is really term OF endaarment
and honor.
Unfortunately, however, this
practice not infrequently brings
about a laxness and lack of though
in applying to their mothers th'
harsh and brutal term the OLE
woman, which conveys a meaning
quite different in spite Of the SINH
larity of the words. Age creep
upon us all and the marks of pass
ing time come all too quickly IN tn
shape of grey hairs, furrowe'
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-03-24
Funeral Cost $4,000.

A remarkable story is published Of
the eccentric will left by a wealthy
woman who died in Paris. When her
will was opened the relatives We're as
founded, for it set forth that out of
ner fortune 10000 francs had to be
spent ON her funeral. The executors.
however, conscientiously carried out
this order. Several doctors were en-
gagged to embalm the body and the cof-
fin was the best and most expensive
that could be obtained. The funeral
was a sight to see. For an Lour tie
bells Of st. Sulpice church rang. Both
inside and outside the church there
were black hangings, edged with sill.
yer. The coffin was literally covered
with rare and costly flowers.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-03-24
University Notes.

While in making up the all-Ameri-
can university athletic teams each
year there is always considerable dis
c lssion as to the relative merits of
eastern and western college athletes
aud athletic teams, The relative strength
and physical development of the aver
age students in the two sections of the
country is seldom, if ever, considered.
The college athlete, who, by his ex-
traordinarY physical development, is
able to establish new athletic records
in track and field events or to score
touch-downs on the gridiron, is re
garded as the typical representative Ct
the results of physical training in our
colleges and universities, both in the
east and west. Despite the importance
which intercollegiate athletics have
been given, the gymnastics for the
training of the thousands of students
who never appear in public competi-
tions, like so much of the class work
of our universities, never comes TO
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-03-24
Prohibited Postal Cards.

Postal cards with certain pictures
on them have recently been prohibited
IN several countries. In Russia all
cards bearing the portrait Of Tolstoi
are confiscated and destroyed; in Tur-
key no card bearing the name of Allah
or Of Mahomet, the photograph of the
Kaaba or the portrait Of Mohamme
dan woman, is allowed to go through
the mail; in SaXOny all postal cards
are prohibited which refer iD 8ny way
TO a recenT adventure OF Princess
Louise; in Portugal the postal of.
ficialS have been instructed to destroy
any card which is designed to cast
ridicule on the king on account of his
corpulence; in France strenuous efforts
are constantly being made to keep out
of circulation picture postal cards
which are an offense to good taste;
and, finally, all cards referring to the
late Queen Draga and to Prince Henri.
of Holland are prohibited
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-03-24

wrinkles and bowed shoulders as
the result of toll and labor, and pos
sibly cares and worry. But it is
unkind and even brutal for the
young to ever unthinkingly remind
their elders of this fact, and most
of all their mothers who have loved
and worked and cared for them
during their mewling, spew1ng and
troublesome days of childhood and
youth. Without this loving care
and tenderness, coupled in most in
stances with Yigils of sleepless
nights during times of childhood
illness, it would probably be a far
different story with most Of the
young men who arrive at the age
of manhood, and they owe lasting.
debt Of gratitude and appreciation
to the mothers who have thus worn
themselves out prematurely. And
these mothers naturally do not like
to be referred to as the ''old wo-
man" 1t makes them feel as though
they had run their race and were
getting in the way.
The world has no use for the boy
who doesn't reverence his mother.
The man who loves and respects
his mother has to be pretty mean
before the community will go back
on him altogether. The boy who
sees to it that mother doesn't have
to bring in a bucket of coal or sweep
the snow off the porch is doing
more toward attracting the atten-
ton of the Lord than the man who
gives 81, 900 toward building new
church, And when she is gone, boys,
it will be a whole lot of satisfaction
to you to know that you always
spoke of her tenderly and as moth
err" Don't fall into the habit of
speaking of her slightlngly or dis
respectfully.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-03-24

chest, this. SHOWS greater lung eX-
pansion on the part Of Wisconsin
students than on that of any but Cor
nell men, as the Wisconsin, chest nor
NAL is but "a. 3 inches, compared to the
Yale measure of 344, Amherst's 34.6,
and Cornell's 348.
The girth of the average Wisconsin
students waist is larger than that Of
students of the other universities,
being 288 inches, compared to that
Fof Yale and Cornell, which is 28.6, and
Amherst, which is 28.5. The same
proportion is shown In his girth, Wis
consin leading with 356 inches to
CornelPs 35.2, Amherst's 35.1, and
Yale's even 80 inches.
Wisconsin and Cornell ale exactly
in their measurements for breadth of
shout iers, both being Ill inches
across. Amherst is 1853 inches across,
and Yale is lowest. 161 inches across.
Wisconsin men can claim superiority
in the girth of their right biceps,
which measure lis inches to Cornell's
lit and Yale and Amherst's 11.6
inches. Amherst has a tenth of an
inch larger right forearm, the
measurement being 10.5 inches to Wis
consin's 1O4. Yale has the same as
Wisconsin, and Cornell Is last with
1O.1 inches.
The measurem ent of the average
Wisconsin mans right thigh is 2O.7
inches, which compares we'll with
Amherst's 2O.5, Yale's 2O3, and
Cornells 2O2. In the measurements
of the right calf Wisconsin shows 1873
inches, next highest to Cornell, which
has 1879 inches. Both Yale and
Amherst have 1871 inches girtb.
WISCONSIN HAM STRONGER.
Comparison of the strength of the
right and left forearms of the average
man of the three universities shows
Wisconsin to have larger superiority
than in any other of the measure
ments. The right forearm strength is
125 pounds, compared to Yale's 119
and Amherst's SO; and comparing left
forearms, Wisconsin has record of
of 12O pounds to Yale's 1888 and
Amherst's 815.
In view of these nigh averages in the
physical measurement of Wisconsin
students, it is interesting to note the
source from which this splendid
material is drawn. Of 200 men ex-
ahmed 128 were from different parts
of Wisconsin, 10 we're from Illinois, 5
each from Michigan, New York, and
the Philippine islands, each from
South Dakota, Minnesota and Iowa,
2 from Nebraska. and l each from
England, Cuba, Holland. Japan
Georgia, Florida, Pennsylvania, Ohio
Massachusetts and Kansas.
THOUSANDS IN GYMNASIUM CLASSES.
! There are now 1,OOOmen taking work
| in the gymnasium twice week which
is equivalent TO 1000 men in training
each week. This does not include the
1000 men who are taking voluntary
exercise in connection with some one
of the various athletic teams and Or
CARNATIONS of the university, or as g
continuation of the work done in the
first two years. These figures give
sufficient explanation Of the crowded
conditions and general inadequacy
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-03-24

OFFICE OF COUNTY CLERK,
LANCASTER. Wis, MARCH 90, 1906.
To THE ELECTORS OF GRANT COUNTY:
Notice is hereby given that aJudicial
Election is to be held in the
several towns. wards and election pre-
cincts in the county of Grant on the
Third Day of ApriJ, 1906,
at which the officers named below are
to be chosen. The name of the candi-
date for each office to be voted for is
given opposite the title of the office and
under the appropriate designation,
each in it's proper column.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-03-24

the voter in marking his ballot can be
taken into the booth, and may be used
to copy from. The ballot must not be
shown so that any person can see how
it has been marked by the voter After
it is marked it should be folded so that
the inside cannot be seen, but so that
the printed Endorsements and sigma
lures of the ballot clerks on the out
side may he seen. Then the voter
should pass out of the booth or COM
partment, give his name to the lnspec
tor in charge of the ballot box, hand
him his ballot to be placed in the box,
and pass out of the voting place. A
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-03-24

public attention. Some interesting
statistics have been compiled by DIR.
J. G. Elsom. director Of gymnastics at
the University of Wisconsin, showing
that, although experts may award first
place to eastern university athletic
teams, the average western college
student, or rather the average student
of the University Of Wisconsin, ex-
ceeds his eastern brother in all around
physical development.
WESTERN COLLEGE MAN LEADS.
Whether 1t be that the material
from which the students body is drawn
is superior in quality, or that the op-
portunities and methods of physical
training are better, it is fact that
the average student Of the University
of Wisconsin shows a marked super
iority of physical development over
men in eastern colleges and universe
ties. A Statistical comparison of meas
urements of the freshmen and sophie
mores in Wisconsin, Yale, Cornell and
Amherst shows that the Wisconsin
men of these classes, although younger,
in the average, Surpass the others in
weight, height, the girth of the head,
neck, bicep, breadth of shoulders, legs,
strength of grip, and in lung capacity
in all cases except in that of the Cor
nell student. whose lung capacity is
unusually high.
PHYSICAL TRAINING REQUIRED OF ALL.
The regulations of the department
of physical culture at the University
of Wisconsin requires each man in the
freshman and sophomore classes to
undergo a physical examination and
take two years training, in order that
his general health may be ascertained,
his weak points discovered and appro-
pirate corrective exercises prescribed.
Al careful record is made of fifty diff
ferent measurements of each student,
and compared with similar measure
ments made at the end of the two
years training. These include also
records of the condition of b e
students heart, lungs, skin. spine and
muscles. The comparative statistics
show With accuracy the improvement
in physique and strength which the
student has made as a result of the
physical training.
AVERAGE WISCONSIN MAN YOUNGER.
AS to age, the Wisconsin man aver
ages only 2O.1 years, while the average
| Yale man is 203 and the Amherst man
| 208 years. Yale and Wisconsin men
are very nearly of a weight, the Wis
consin average being 1895 pounds and
! the Yale man being 139 pounds; Am
herst and Cornell both average 135
pounds. The average Wisconsin man
is SO inches tall q feet 10 inches), while
the Cornell and Amherst men are 67.G
inches, and the Yale man is CTS inches
Wisconsin men have larger head girth
also, the average measurement being
22.6 inches, compared to Amherst's 22.5
and the Yale and Cornell measure
ment of 22.4 inches.
In the matter of lung capacity Wis.
consin is excelled only by Cornell
which has the unusually high measure
ment average of 258 cubic inches. The
Wisconsin measurement is 247 cubic
inches, compared to Yale's 244 and
Amherst's 230 cubic inches. Compared
to the normal measurement of the
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-03-24
Sample Ballot for Judicial Election

voter who declares to the presiding Of
ficer that he is unable to read, or that
by reason of physical disability he is
unable to mark his ballot, can have as
sistance of one or two election officers
in marking the same, to be chosen by
the voter; and if he declares that he is
totally blind, he may be assisted by
any person chosen by him from among
the legal voters of the county. The
presiding officer may administer an
oath in his discretion, as to such per-
sons disability. The party designa-
tions and candidates for the different
Offices are, for example, as follows:
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-03-24
Information to V0terS

Information to VOterS
The following instructions are given
for the information and guidance of
voters: A voter upon entering the
polling place and giving his name and
residence, will receive a ballot from
the ballot clerk which must have en-
dorsed thereon the names or initials of
both ballot clerks, and no other ballot
can be used. Upon receiving his bal
lot, the voter must retire alone to
booth or compartment and prepare the
same for voting. A ballot clerk may
inform the voter as to the proper man.
ner of marking ballot, but he must