The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1906-04-25
The
PulChritudOnium.

pulchritudonium is. Nor did / until
quite recently; but l am better in
formed now, and, indeed, am quite an
authority on the instrument-or imple-
ment? II was Delia's inquisitive mind
that effected my instruction. Della
reads the newspapers, after a fashion
Il should say, after the fashions. And
the part of the paper on which her at
tention and interest are concentrated
contains suitable advertisements to
catch the unwary eye. Here it was
that she came upon this pulchritudon-
1um. The pulchritudonium beauties
you; it renders you (according to ad-
vertisement) proof against increasing
years. 1t keeps the figure fine and the
complexion fresh; and it only needs
using for ten minutes every day. AL
30 1t only costs-but that is of no con-
sequence, save that it started the pull
chritudonium between Della and my
self.
II suppose you couldn't let me have
a small sum on my weeks check?' in
quired Della affably.
l said / thought it might be man
aged, and thinking a certain interest
edness might be expected of-me, asked
why.
"Oh, l don't know" said Della cas-
ually. Il thought perhaps | might
buy-Edward, how do you pronounce
pulchritudonium?" She spelled it out
from her paper with pains, but | had
forgotten what the first part was be-
fore we reached the end. However,
at last we got at it.
ut seems wonderful thing" she
remarked, in a disinterested tone of
voice
What, may ask, is this wonderful
fhing?" | inquired, seeing that l was
expected to do so.
At that, Della, having achieved her
Introduction, began to talk glibly and
with enthusiasm.
"You see, dear, it's on scientific
principles, just discovered, and it de-
velops you all over just properly, and
no more. 1t gets rid of all super
fluous fat, you know and makes you
perfect figure, besides sending the
blood through the body and maintain
ing perfect complexion by means
of circulation. Oh, here it is. This
is what it says" She had been hastily
turning over the paper in search of
the advertisement, and she now be-
gan to read impressively. Beauty
and symmetry are dependent upon the
ae inta
external forces in an organism. If
this adjustment be obtained, beauty
naturally follows. In the case of the
human being, nature has so arranged
1t that a nice balance between the
muscles, nerves and hgaments' DE
lila stumbled over that" of the body
secures the desired effect. This is
obtained by suitable exercise, and this
1s the purpose for which the pulchri-
'tAaonium was designed. No woman
need despair of acquiring grace and
lissomeness if she will systematic
ally use the pulchritudonium'
Della ceased, and looked at me eag-
erly. Perhaps it was not case for
frankness, but | distrusted that show
of false science.
81 do not think it would be any use
at ALL" ! said
Della put down the paper suddenly,
and rose Il see," she said coldly.
"You don't mind my growing fat. You
would like me to grow stout and lose
my figure"
] explained that was only question
ing the adequacy of the pulchritudon-
1um to permit such a thing; at which
she relaxed.
But ever so many people have used
1t, and testify to its advantages" she
protested. There's a whole list of
names here"
{ There always will be geese for
! quacks," I said, adding Il mean ducks,
% course"
haven't the faintest idea what you
mean," said Della loftily, "and
that that cynical way you've got
is simply beastly. l suppose you
it's becoming, but it isn't. It's
vulgar"
"All right" said |, cheerfully. 'If
you think the pulch ?what's-it's-na
will make you more becoming, by all
means have it,"
( Now | had conceded the point, and
Della had got what she wanted; and
she ought to have been satisfied. But
she was not. She did not even thank
me.
"You used to admire me once" she
gaid, after a pause.
"I know / did, my DEAR" said
4 lightly. why shouldn't I?'
d "Of course" she said rather warm
ly, "if you think I'm not becoming, and
that I'm getting too stout, please say
I 30 at once, and let me know. l al
ways like to know the truth, however
unpleasant"
Great Scott" protested at this re-
markable instance of feminine perver
sity you wanted the thing for that
yarv roacon and 7 said Won cOuld have