The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1906-10-05
WAS A WONDERFUL INVENTION
Tried a New Perpetual Motion Ma
chine That Uncovered Fortune.
CWashington Post.(

IT reckon pensively observed my
friend the Liar as he bit off two-ounce
piece of trust-made plug, that Tor
thing that has been satisfactorily discov-
cred so often. perpetual motion has really
accomplished less than any other stand
ard periodical invention.
1T was out in the placer mining re
gion OF Arizona. ! had never been mucn
on the burrow. believing my talents were
of the sort that are better employed out
working on a ranch, where Colonel Darl-
ing had begun 10 introduce a few east
ern landscape gardening ideas
There was a little stream in the hills
above the Colonefs fine stone ranch
house and mile or so from the resi-
dence he had built a reservoir to supply
a fountain in the front lawn. 1t was a
corking big fountain and the talk of the
netghborhood for fifty miles in four di-
rections. The volume OF water running
through the thing was so great, owing
to the terrific fail from the mountain top.
that the stream below the fountain roared
like Niagara, and soon wore a deep bed
for itself among the rocks below the lawn.
'One day when I was incoming into the
wide pool and figuring on some little
improvement for the outfit. an idea
popped into my head that just had all
my other notions outclassed as complete
~ as il IL was some other person 5
scher:e. After thinking il over for a fe-
verish day and night, i went 10 the boss
as carelessly as if 1 We're asking for a
mere raise OF salary. and told him j would
like the price Of a mile OF iron pipe and
funnel with a ten-foot mouth, also
for three days off.
The Colonel looked rather mystified as
he wrote out the check, and told me l
could go. But l wouldn't explain.
Just winked and went out to saddle my
favorite pony and give orders TO the
teamsters
Three days later 1 was back from Yu-
ma and hac my diggers at work. and a
week later there came consignment of
pipe. The funnel also which I had made
in Yuma TO save time-the pipe / had Or
dered by telegraph from San Francisco
came with the first load and was In po-
sition Immediately after my pipe line had
been laid and was ready for business
Then, maybe, the Coionels eyes didn't
bulge out of his head-fOr what had your
servant done but started perpetual mo-
ton works right there on the premises
No theories, mind you. but the real, 81
mon-pure, 1S-karat p. M. right there. per-
petual-motioning day and night as neat
as WAX
You see, 1 had dug a big pit for my
funnel right at the fountain basins out
let. To the lower end of the funnel l had
attached my pipe line. the other ter
minus of which stuck out over the reser-
Voir a mile away The heavy fall of the
water into the funnel forced the stream
through its only avenue of escape-the
pipe l1ne-back 70 the reservoir again in
undiminished volume. Not a drop of wa
lCA CoOdPSQ NOHu the fllI or was IOSI 10
the Coloners ranch. The tiny bit that
got away through evaporation was all
that didn't stay right there.
'Tickled? Why the Colonel was the
prOudeSt man in nine states and one ter
ritory. There wasn't anything too good
for me. The old man even cried himself
20 sleep at night because he hadn't any
beautiful daughter for me to marry and
live happily evec after with
But the best of good things have flaws
in them. There was one element I hadn't
counted on. You see. the stream above
was feeding the reservoir all the time
and as none escaped below, the volume
in the fountain kept getting bigger and
bigger. Each time my pipe sQuirted a
few hundred tons into the pond the vol
ume sent down was just so much heav-
Ter. and, of course. the speed of the
stream was proportionately increased
both in the down trip and in the return
through my pipe. When 1 noticed this
constantly increasing roar and realized