davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
He Was Not a College Boy.

Representative Fitzgerald of Brook.
iyn overheard an amusing dialogue on
his way home from the House of Rep,
resentatives the other evening. He
boarded a Georgetown car, the con.
ductor of which was about so years
old and anything but an Adonis
When the car reached Fourteenth
street, within a stones throw of the
Eagle Bureau. an elderly woman ran
up and shouted: Conductor, oh, con.
ductor do you (meaning the carl go
to Georgetown College,"
The collector OF nickels looked at
her few seconds and then gave two
bells. AS the car started, leaving the
woman i'm the middle of the street,
the conductor turned and asked,
Madam. do Oi look lolke student?"
Washington Star.
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
HAD HEART PAINS
A Critical Case Of rheumatism Cured
BY Dr.WilIiams' Pink Pills.

While Mr.. w. S. Geisel, of No. l25
East Coates street, Moberly, Mo, was
steadily working at his trade in a foun-
dry at that place, he became the victim
of an attack of rheumatism, aud his eI-
perience is that of thousands who are
compelled to work in similar surround
ings. He describes his situation as fol-
lows:
81 had been at work for long time
in foundry where l was exposed TO
dampness. First my feet began TO hurt
End to swell, then my knees and my
shoulder joints began to be affected IN
the same way. Finally l could not walk
without great difficulty and suffering
and had to stop work altogether. My
appetite was feeble and grew very pale
and weak. began to have pains about
my heart and it tiuttered a great deal.
became greatly alarmed about my con-
I-dition. My mother knew abont the vir-
tues OF Dr. Williams Pink Pills, as they
had given her back her health when She
was nearly wasting to death, and when
she found that they were good for rheu.
matism too, she began to give them TO
me about n month after / was attacked.
AHoO was III IHo ttiIN pdfL OF Mhlcn,
1908, and by June they had driven away
the pains and swelling and had restored
my appetite and color. Then / felt
strong enough to take up line of ont
door work and now, in October, | re-
gard myself as entirely well and / am
about to go into a foundry again at St.
Louis"
DIR. Williams Pink Pills also cure
other diseases springing from i'm
pure blood or disordered nerves, such
as sciatica, locomotor ataxia, partial
paralysis and all forms of weakness in
male or female. They may be had a:
all druggists or directly from the DIR.
Williams Medicine Company, Schenec.
tady, N. Y.
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
NO REST NIGHT OR DAY.
With Irritating Skin Humor-Hair Be.
gan 10 Fall Out-Wonderful Re
suit from Cutieura Remedies.

About the latter part OF July my
whole body began to itch. did not
take much notice of il at first, bf Il
began TO get worse all the time, and
then began to get uneasy and tried
all kinds of baths and other remedies
that were recommended for skin hum
Ors; but became worse all the time.
My hair began 20 fall out and my
scalp itched all the time. Especially
at night, just as soon as | would get
in bed and get warm, my whole body
would begin to itch and my finger
nails would keep it irritated, and II
was not long before | could not rest
night or day. A friend asked me
to try the Cuticura Remedies. and ]
did, and the first application helped
me wonderfully. For about four
weeks I would take hot bath every
night and then apply the Cuticura
Ointment to my whole body; and !
kept getting better, and by the time
| used four boxes of Cuticura was
entirely cured. and my hair stopped
falling out. ID. e. Blankenship, $40
N. Del. ST., Indianapolis, Ind, Oct. 81.
1906"
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
Women Wear imitation Jewels

Never have ] known such a craze
for imitation jewelry as now" was
the remark of the manager OF one of
the big city department stores. and II
only needs glance to see that in a
store where The crowds are greatest
the imitation jewelry lies.
I'VE can't supply the demand"
went on the manager. "and know it
is the case not alone with us, but
even more so with those firms who
make speciality of selling it alone.
Jewellers who have for years been
in the business have told me that
their trade has suffered greatly from
this cause. Such art and skill have
entered into its manufacture that in
many cases 1t can't be told from the
real"
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
Expert Liars.

Nine. Isabelle Massieu, an explorer
who has just returned to Europe from
journey in Anam, in Indo China
says she has met the most accom-
plished liars in the world. One chief
told her that he had seen an English
vessel so large that his father, who
was a young man when he started "a
walk down the deck, had white hair
before he reached the mainmast.
Thereupon another chief remarked
that there were trees in France so
tall that bird took ten years to reach
the ton.
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
His Labor Over.

"The civil service" said Senator
Knox, "is not what it used to be.
Merit counts in it as in business now
and industry and intelligence are the
qualities that bring success.
ct was not always so. remember
meeting man on Pennsylvania ave.
nue. one morning many years ago. II
was late. He was all dressed up.
Plainly he was taking a day off,
Well he said. as we conversed,
4 worked mighty hard during the last
three months trying to get a civil ser.
vice appointment, but I'm going to
take 1t easy now
Failed through lack of influence
I suppose?' said |.
." No, no. said he. I've got the ap.
pointment.'
And he resumed his pleasant
STROLL"
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
OUNCE WAS MAN OF LEARNING.
Nickname Of Dunsseotus, Learned
Man GOO Years Ago.

WAN oOO Years ago.
Ounce" is generally applied to
dull. stupid, unteachable boys. The
person from whose name the word is
supposed to have been derived was
quite different character.
1t was used as a term or reproach
by the Thomists to the followers OF
Dunsscotus, who was their antagonist
In religious controversy. This
johannes Dunsscotus" was a very
learned man, who lived about the end
of the thirteenth and beginning of the
fourteenth century. The English say
he was born in Northumberland; the
Scotch allege he was born at Duns,
In the Mers, the neighboring county
to Northumberland, and hence he was
called Dunsscotus.
He died at Cologne, Nov. 6, 1908
His fame was so great that when al
Oxford 10000 scholars attended to
hear his lectures.
The Thomists were the followers OF
Thomas Aquinas, a Dominican friar
celebrated for his learning.-Str
Stories.
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
Maltese Lace.

All genuine maltese lace is hand
made, and the inhabitants of the isl
ands are strongly opposed to any form
of labor-saving machinery. The in
dustry is almost exclusively confined
to women and girls, and many families
have special designs that are handed
down from one generation to anoth
er. Two or three firms practically
control the output of the islands
Most of the lace exported is made on
the island OF Coco. Silk and cotton
are the materials used. The demand
in America for this work is becoming
greater every year.
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
ROUTED THE TIGER WITH MAP,
Presence of Mind Saved Life Of Eng
llsh Surveyor.

Presence of Mind Saved Life of Eng
llsh Surveyor.
How an English surveyor routed a
Malayan tiger, with no other weapon
than n rolled-up map, is told by the
Straits Times of Singapore: while a
well-known local surveyor, who had
been kept out late at work on Satur-
day night. was driving in a rikisha
along Tampenis road, about 1880
o'clock, his rikisha coolie suddenly
droppedt he shafts and ran for his life
into the edge OF the jungle. On peer
ing into the darkness-the vehicle
was not carrying n light--the gentle
man saw large creature standing in
the middle of the road. He got out Of
the rikisha and went towards the
beast. thinking IL some large dog that
bad frightened the coolie. When
within six or seven yards he per-
ceived that the brute was large ii.
ger.
"He had no weapon except a large
district survey map rolled up. He
saw the futility of attempting to dis
able the tiger with the rolled-up map,
but the thought struck him that he
might manage to brighten it my mean
Of his roll. Suddenly he unrolled it
with quick flip, spreading it to its
full area of four or five feet square.
With single bound the tiger cleared
off into the jungle.
1.-THE next thing was TO find the
coolie. who eventually was discovered
in a state of collapse in the ditch. He
was unable to pull his fare back and
1t was not until three or four miles
had been traversed with both men on
foot that he recovered sufficiently to
pull the European home"
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23

white beds are women and girls who
are awaiting or recovering from opera
tions made necessary by neglect.
Every one of these patients had
plenty of warning in that bearing down
feeling, pain at the left or right of the
abdomen, nervous exhaustion, pain in
the small of the back, pelvic catarrh,
dizziness, fiatulency, displacements or
irregularities. All of these symptoms
are indications of an unhealthy con-
dition of the female organs, and if not
needed the trouble may make Roadway
until the penalty has to be paid by a
dangerous operation, and a lifetime of
impaired usefulness at best, while in
many cases the results are fatal.
Miss Luella Adams, of Seattle, Wash,
writes:
Dear Mrs. Pinkham -
"About two years ago was great suf-
ferer from a severe female trouble, pains and
headaches. The doctor prescribed for me and
finally told me that had a tumor and must
undergo an operation If wanted to get well.
felt that this was my death warrant but L
spent hundreds of dollars for medical help,
hut the tumor kept growing. Fortunately L
correspondent with an aunt inthe New England
States and she advised me to take Lydia T..
Pinkhams Vegetable Compound, as it was
said to cure tumors. / did so and Immediately
began to improve in health, and was entirely
cured, the tumOr disappearing entirely, with
out an operation. 1 wish every suffering
woman would try this great preparation"
Just as surely as Miss Adams was
cured of the troubles enumerated in
her letter, just so surely will Lydia Z.
Pinkham's Vegetable Compound cure
other women who suffer from fe-
male troubles, Inflammation, kidney
troubles, nervous excitability or ner-
vous prostration.
Mrs. Pinkham invites all young
women who are i'll to write her for free
advice. She is daughter-in-law of
Lydia f. Pinkham and for twenty-five
years has been advising sick women
free of charge. Address, Lynn, Mass.
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
A Thing of Beauty Is a-praIn!

At dinner of the Sanitary Inspec.
tors association at Hoiborn restau-
rant, Sir Wyke Bayliss confessed that
art and sanitation seemed far apart.
Would you compare art" some would
say, with a drain running down a
street?" yet one OF the loveliest
things In the world was a drain
(laughter)-when it was consecrated
by art in the form of gargoyle on
the roof OF a cathedral. The two were
not so far apart. Art was the sci
ence of beauty; sanitation was the
science of health; and what were
beauty and health if they were not
The same thing?"-London Telegraph.
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23

What God may hereafter require OF
you you must not give the least trou.
Die about. Everything He gives you
to do, you must do as well as ever you
can. and that is the best possible
preparation for what He may want
you TO do next If people would but
do what they have to do. they would
always find themselves ready for
what came next.-George Macdonald.
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
Fish Story Hard to Beat.

Here is fish story told by Brit
ish nobleman: An freshman had caught
a big pike. Noting a lump in its
stomach, he cut it open. "As | cut
1t open there was a mighty rush and
a Tapping of wings, and away few a
wild duck; and when looked inside,
there was a nest with four eggs. and
she had been afther sitting on the
nest"
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
Children shouId Be soclabIe.

Hospitality should be encouraged
IN children as far as it is within the
means of the parents to do so. Let
them have their little teas and ami
versary parties. 1t will help them to
develop this trait, and will give them
an opportunity TO put into practice
amenities of social life which they are
expected to observe in later life.
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
How's This T?

We oner One Hundred Dollars Reward for any
case OF CatarIh that cannot be cured by Halls
Catarrl. Cure.
+ J. CHENEY e. CO., Toledo, o..
We. the undersigned. have known Y. j. Cheney
for the Is years and believe him perfectly hon
orabie I'm all bus ness transactions and financially
able 20 carry any obligations made by his hrIn.
WALnING, kINNAN MARVIN,
Wholesale Druggists, Toledo, o..
Hairs Catsrrh Cure r. taken internally, acting
directly upon the blood and mucous surfaces OF the
system. Testimonials sent free. Price IS cents FER
bottle. Sold by all Druggists.
Take Halls Family Pills for constipation.
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
Modestx and Greatness.

He only is great who has the habits
OF greatness; who, after performing
what none in ten thousand could ac-
complish. passes on like Samson, and
tells neither father nor mother of it."
-Layater
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
Customers Shave Themselves.

Londoa barber shops now provide
accommodations for and welcome the
many men who prefer to shave them
selves. among other things. keeping
their shaving utensils in order. They
also teach the inexperienced who
want to learn how to shave themselves
nronerlY
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
Many Children are sickIy.

Mother Gray's Sweet Powders forChildren,
used by Mother Gray, nurse in Children's
Home, New York, cure Feverishness, Head
ache, Stomach Troubles, Teething Dis
orders, Break up Colds and Destroy Worms.
Atall Druggists ,25c. Sample mailed FREE.
Address Allen S. Olmsted, lie Roy, N. Y.
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
One Compensation.

Some man above you may have FIVE
times your salary. but in all probable
ity you beat him home to dinner every
night in the week.-john A. Rowland
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23

Luckily some men cannot waste their
all on wild oats, as they have to spend
considerable for headache powders.
A COW seldom kicks when you are
carrying her clover.
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23

In America the woman governs the
man absolutely. In a certain sense the
last man that came TO America was
CHRISTOPHER Columbus.
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
HOSPITALS CROWDED
MAJORITY OF PATIENTS WOMEN
Mrs. Pinkhan's Advice Saves Many
From this Sad and Costly Experience.

It Is a sad but
certain fact that
. v g ry yea r
brings a n in
ere sc in the
numberofopera-
tions performed
upon women in
ur hospitals.
Morethan three
fourths of the
patients lyi n G
on those snow
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23

Unnecessary help is always sad
hindrance.
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
OCS,T FORGET

The best social refinement is to be re-
fined of self.
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
Important to Mothers.

Examine carefully every bottle Of CASTORIA
safe and cure remedy for infants and children.
and see that Il
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
LIVE AGENTS WANTED IN
EVERY TOWN.

Write for full particulars and
illustrated booklet. Address
TOMBIGBEE VALLEY LAND CO.,
Dept. ID. Suite S29-S31, 10 La Sale
St, Chicago. Ill. Branch Office: Suite
61o City Bank & Trust Co. Bldg, Mo-
bile, Ala.
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23

Truth is without value until it is re-
VitaliZed.
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
SuI1D4l I SCHOOLS
IS !: ] NJ
LESSON TwELvE-MARcH TWENTY-FIVE.

blteh like a ike
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
FREE HOMESTEAD LANDS
OF WESTERN CANADA.

Magnificent climate-farmers plowing IN theif
shirt sleeves in the middle OF November.
"A'l are bound to be more than pleased with
the final results of the past seasons harvest. -
Extract.
Coal. wood, water. hay in abuEdance-schoolS
churches, markets convenient.
This is the era OF 500 wheat.
Apply for information to Superintendent OF
Immigration Ottawa. Canada, or to authorized
Canadian Government Agent-M. V. McInnes,
q Avenue Theatre Block. Detroit. Michigan; or
y. A. Laurier Sault Ste. Marie. Michigan
Mention this paperD
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23

Mrs. Winslow's Soothing Syrup.
For cSidren teethng, softens the gums reduces ir
namnation aays pain. cures wind collie. 25c bottle
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23

large 2-oz. package Red Cross Ball Blue, only
cents. The Russ Company, South Bend, Ind
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
FIGDALE. ALABAMA.

The Company's excursion will leave
Chicago on April 8. Very low rate for
the round trip. furnishing a delightful
excursion to the south. No expense
to the purchaser
The Yale expositor., 1906-03-23
IN ALABAMA
THE LAND OF SUNSHINE AND
PLENTY-OWN A FARM AND
BE INDEPENDENT.
We Have a Tract OF the Finest Land
in Southern Alabama to Be Sold
In 40 to 100 Acre Tracts-cash or
Easy Payments-Located in Wash
ington County - Most Healthful
Spot in the South.

No cold weather. no coal TO buy, less
clothing, and, in fact, living is one-half
the cost as in the north. A man with
very little capital can own forty-acre
tract and become independent a few
short years by raising vegetables and
fruits for the northern and eastern
markets. We have the best shipping
facilities. both by water and rail, max
ing our lands the best garden spot In
the country. This section offers more
advantages for the wage-earner or the
man with small capital than any spot
on this green earth. This land will
yield larger profits than you can real
lie out of northern land worth $3.50
per acre. The land is a rich sandy
loan, with a clay subsoil and grows
peaches, pears. grapes, figs and all
kinds of small fruits and vegetables in
great abundance. Also corn, oats,
sweet and Irish potatoes and cotton.
This location is famous for its salubri-
Gus climate and curative powers. Plen-
ty of creeks and pure spring drinking
water. We are erecting a hotel,
church, schoolhouse and store build
ing in our new town,
FIGDALE, ALABAMA,
The Company's excursion will leave
Chicago on April 8. Very low rate for
the round trip. furnishing a delightful
Crittenden press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1879-1907, 1906-12-20

and righted if possible. So with a
f1eeced Russian Jew, or a Scandinavian,
or German Catholic, or a German
Lutheran, a Syrian, or an Armenian.
Some societies maintain legal aid
branches of their own, others apply to
the Legal Aid Society when necessary.
In this connection the societies are
frequently called on to fight shyster law
yers. A man who has been in this coun-
try for six months or year finds that
at last he is in a position to have his
family join him, and sends them the
necessary passage money. On the ar
rival of the ship he goes to Ellis Is
land to welcome them, and discovers
that the sister who has made her home
with him and his family in the old coun-
try is likely to be deported because of
some disease that is named as sufficient
cause for dsbarment in the laws gov
erning immigration. A runner for 4
shyster lawyer, learning of the mans
dilemma, tells him that his employer
can get his sister off the Island if he
will pay over the sum of fifty dollars.
The mans one thought is to get his
sister into the country. He hurries to
the lawyers Office and hands over the
hard-earned money. A few days later
when he sorrowfully bids mis- sister
Crittenden press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1879-1907, 1906-12-20

complained to a countryman of the ex-
ceeding great cost of going very short
distances in the big city. The Society
for Italian Immigrants was at once no
tilted, and, while it could get no trace
of the others who had victimized Foiere,
il succeeded in locating the expressman
who had hold of him last, and this
sharpster was made to disgorge the
three dollars he had collected
If foreigner who has been in A ner-
lea for some time, as was Foierc, can
be passed from harry to harry in this
fashion, how easy it must be to prey
on a fresh arrival, absolutely as ignor-
ant as a newborn babe of the strange
land and its waysl
AS may be gathered from the case of
Foiere, the Society for Italian Immi-
grants, the Societe Franchise de Bien-
faisance, the Sociedad Espanola de
Benehcencia, the Deutsche Frauen
Verein, the Magyar Tarsulat (Hungar-
ian Association), and the hundred and
one odd similar bodies do not limit
themselves to looking after the welfare
of the new arrival. A Frenchman who
has been here for some months and be-
comes the victim of rascal may appeal
to his particular society with the GER
tainty that his case will be taken up
Crittenden press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1879-1907, 1906-12-20

good-by, he is much wiser man.
The immigration regulations permit a
lawyer to charge only ten dollars for
services rendered 10 immigrants, or rel
atives anxious to get them into the
country. One society has had seven
lawyers in as many months debarred
from practicing at any immigration sta
ton because of thar habit of overcharg-
ing grossly, or for accepting fees to get
immigrants landed when it is clear that
they cannot be permitted to land under
the law Other l;wyers have been de-
barred because thg represented to gull
lible ones that it vas necessary for them
to pay certain suns of money before
relatives, desirable immigrants in every
respect, could be released from the i'm
migration station This bold game is
played with amazing frequency, judg-
ing from the cass continually coming
to light.
1t is a peculiar fact that not few
Of the persons WHO swindle newcomers
already landed al foreign born them
selves. Italian sIindlers prey on Ital-
ians, Swedish runners on their kind
each breed of fordgn born harry on his
own countrymen.
The Society fqi Italian Immigrants
has recently been instrumental in send
Crittenden press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1879-1907, 1906-12-20

Being safely escorted to their respective
city destinations or seen safely aboarC
trains or coastwise steamers. AS a gen.
eral rule the service is free; in a few
cases the cost is nominal, just sufficient
to cover necessary expenses, such as
street car fare.
The agents of each society work
among he newcomers of its own ma
tionality, Of course. So it comes about
that Italians, Jews, Swedes, and so on
who accept the profered services ar,
formed into separate groups, properly
labeled, taken aboard the ferryboat ply
ing between the immigration station
and the mainland, are kept together
thereon, and, once on the mainland
with agents leading, with other agents
bringing up the rear, and policemen
helping to keep a sharp lookout, the
groups are piloted safely past the dan,
gers awaiting their less fortunate ship
mates at the very gateway of the new
land, and led to the Offices of the re-
respective societies, whence they are de-
spatched, under escort still, each man 70
his own particular destination.
Now, see what this means specifically
to the immigrant who places himself in
the hands of an immigrant society pre-.
paratory to landing in the world of his
glowing hopes and radiant dreams.
Bernardo Foere, coming from Du-
range, Colorado, and on his way to Italy,
alghted from a train in Jersey City
and was speedily taken in tow by one
of the many hotel runners who infest
the railroad stations and steamship land
ings. As he expressed desire to come
to New York, the hotel runner requested
the payment of one dollar for his serv-
ices, which Foiere paid. The runners
services consisted in taking Foiere on
the ferryboat to New York City. Once
there his guide turned Foiere over to
an expressman, who charged him two
dollars and a half to take him to a
steamship dock not a dozen blocks
away.
Foiere had a trunk which was to ar
rive on the same train with him. So
he left the dock and started back to
the ferry station, that he might locate
and secure his baggage. On the way
thither he was picked up by second
cxpressman, who kindly offered to find
his trunk for him for the sum OF two
dollars and half. Again Foiere was
easy money" but the trunk was not
found. Then the Italian made it known
that he wanted to go to a hotel fire.
quented by his countYmen. 1t was not
a quarter of mile from the ferry sta
ton, yet when the cxpressman had led
the way there he collected three
dollars.
All this came to light when Foiere