The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1906-04-29
A NERVOUS AFFECTION.
Why Bill Was Mistakenly Suspected
of CoWardlce.

w. j. hampton in Judge
I was so absorbed in the mountain pano-
rama which spread before me at a turn
of the road that l did not notice the
mountaineer sitting on the fence by the
roadside until my horse SHE'D and nearly
pitched me over into the little corn patch
1t was such a picture as frequently re-
lieves the monotony of travel through the
mountain region of eastern Kentucky.
The mountaineer was not so vsibly dis
turbed as l was, nor my horse.
Good morning" 1 said, recovering my
balance.
Yer critters some slkittish," was his
salute.
HE was looking at the scenery" 1
laughed. nodding toward the other side
of the road.
That amt me, I reckon" replied the
mountaineer with the faint flash of humor
which comes to his kind at times.
He was typical specimen in cottonade
trousers, hickory shirt. heavy brogans.
and a wool hat which had lost its pris-
tine stiffness and wilted hopelessly about
his head. He was lank and long and
sallow-not fair to look upon but his
eyes We're clear and the corners of his
mouth turned upward. There Is always
something good in man like that.
I asked him how far it was to the
mouth of Greasy, and as he was telling
me l saw a long, smooth-bore gun of an
cient pattern lying in the weeds in the
fence corner.
Hunting hardly seems to be worth
while around here?" 1 ventured.
"Oh, dunno ez to that he replied as
IL in mild defense of his native heath
II merely thought sc from seeing your
gun down there in the weeds" argued.
"Tain't my gum" he explained.
Nor" 1 said briefly; for the subject of
guns is one to be handled carefully in
those parts, unless one knows definitely
what he is talking about.
mo Its Bill Grimes. "
He smiled in way that invited inter-
rogation and I took a risk.
Where's Bill?" l asked Familiarity,
though 1 had never heard of Mr.. Grimes
before.
did you meet woman a piece up the
road?" he inquired.
Yes; just beyond the turn back yon-
der"
We'll. that wuz Bits wife"
HE wasn't with her when saw her.
mo; ner he won't be eff he kin keep
outen her way" This was so evidently
a statement which required calculation
that he did not wait for me to question
him further, but went on with his story.
= You see, Bill come erlOng mere about
half an hour ago, with his gun lookin'
fer John Sizemore. They's havin' some
trouble over the line fence Bill says ter
me ez how John wouldn't listen ter rea-
son, an he wus goin' ter try buckshot on
ter him. 1 tole him John wuz purity handy
with a gun hisself. an he'd better look
out. That kinder riled him, an he fared
up like a bresh-fire. He stomped the
weeds down all around an swore that he
would have John Sizemore's hearts blood
an rip his NERDS out an skelp him alive.
an so on. tell / most got uneasy. He said
ez how his wife wuz a Sizemore herself.
an he wuz done being helt up to chop
frewood an run Grants. Jist then seen
his wife comm up the hill. an | says
ter him that we could kinder talk 1t over
in meetin'. With that Bill took one look
over his shoulder, an, by hokeyl he
drapped that gun ez eff 1t wuz red-hot
shovel, an over the fence he goes fer
the thicket When she come up she axes
me eff 1 I'd seen Bill anywheres around.
an 1 says. No, ma'am.' an she goes on
up the hill. Ez soon ez / think it's safe
I'll whistle fer Bill ter come back"
ut strikes me-" / put in, that Bill is
something of a coward
HE don't talk like it. / reckon Bits
jist kinder narvious when thar's women
around" -
"True enough" / responded Some men
are that way"
Then we both smiled. sympathetically,
SO to speak, and I hadn't ridden more
than a hundred yards until heard long,
low, cautious whistle.