davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15
Don't re Too ..ynti,n.1v

Ones nationality is to others bore
and nuisance which cannot be got
oGt of the way too soon. A mans ma
tIonality is somethin. he is justly
proud of, but not till it is put aside can
the man of another nation have JOY of
him, humanity. spiritually. - W. D.
Iowells.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15
Nai;x md Mailing.

When buyer declared that he paid
cash right OH the nail and thereby nail
ed great bargain" what kind of a
nail did he refer to? What is meant by
a doornail and the expression. Dead
as doornail?'
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15
Rcnl Pleasure.

Jack-I suppose there i; no:hing that
pleases woman more than The devot-
ed attention OF the man of l.c- choice?
Bess-EXcept. perhaps. the devoted at.
tention Of the nan of some other girls
choice-Exchangc
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15
sizing Hin, up.

81 believe cen truthfully say" re-
marked tine self compliment man. that
! lave only one fault, and that's q
snl:l one"
Yes" replied the candid man.
That's just like the hoe in & n..e.Scl.
1t may be small hoe. l..t it n.:l!;cs
the nicke. ne gool." Philadelphia
Press.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15
oLDEN TIME PENALTIES.
Charges of the Days When Criminal.
We're BOILED In Oil.


The subjoincd record, extracted from,
the archives Of OLD Paris. possesses suf-
Ecient interest to warrant it's publ:ca-
ton. Our readers will see from it
what Il terrible thing the capital pen
atty was in former days and at the
same time learn THAT Tic gentlemen
who acted as cYccut:oners, will their
assistants and torturers, did Rot la
boz for glory alone:
AN EXECUrlONER'S PRICE LIST.
Liv-es.>
TO boiling u n.alcfactor in oil.............4s
To quartering him while alive............30
10 alfording n criminal passage from
life to death by the sword. .............eo
To breaking the body on the wheel...... ~
To fixing his head upon II pole. ......... 10
To cutting n man into four pieces. Sc
To hanging a culprit.. ......................G0
10 enshrouding the corpse. ................
10 impaling Il living man..
TO burning sorceress alive.
To flay-ing a living man..................... Is
TO drowning u child murderess IN /.
sack ............................
TO buryinS Il suicide at crossroads.......2 20
TO applying the torture. a
To applying the thumbscrew. ............. 9
To applying the buslkins. Observation-Disclosures.
To administering the Gehenna torture. 10
TO putting a person in the pillory........ 2
10 logging ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS.
TO branding with a hot iron. ............10
To cutting off the nose. the ears or the
tongue OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES. ...l9
London Lancet.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15
Surely Not.

Custorer-Can' you wait upon mef
I've been here for nearly an hour. Two
pounds of liver. please. Butcher Sor-
~. but there are three or four ahead
Of you. Surely you don't want your
liver out Of order?
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15

Garry your present load firmly, cor
rectly and cheerfully, and some one
will surely note at the proper time that
you are equal to a larger one.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15
submissive.

what would You do, Henry" asked
Mrs. Johnston. III burglars got into
the house?"
"Do:" replied her husband. II sup
pose would just do what they tod
me. I've never had my own way in
this house yet
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15

Lost, a fur collar, on Erie
street Saturday afternoon.
The finder will please return
to the Times ..ice.
Mrs. j. M. Branson
f15
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15

The readiest and surest way to get
rid Of censure is to correct ourselves
Demosthenes.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15
Wanted.

Man to work on farm, refer
ence required.
David Seabloom
If Phone Red q
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15

It is often easier to serve two mus.
scrs than t. r"-.ar two servants
Philadelphia Record.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15
1t is just as true today as it
S!leriff's Sale.

by virtue al a special execution, To
mo directed from the clerk of the dis
trlci court OF iarrison county. Iowa,
ON a judgement obtained in said court
ON the aoth day 'lf September, 1905. in
favor OF NJ I. Snyder rs plaintiff and
against Jacob s. SNYDER ct-al rs defcn-
dents. for the sum al thirteen hundred
twenty four and 20 100 dollars, and
cos's, taxed al sixty three and 10000
dollars, upon which judgment thcrc is
now balance due Of thirteen hundred
twenty four and 2O-lOO dollars, and
si&ty three and 10 100 dollars, costs, |
have levied upon the following real cs-
tate taken rs the property of the dcicn-
dant to satisfy said execution, to-wit
Tic soNth half of the nth cast quart
0cr of section nine twp IS north range
Al west OF the 9th /, M Md Will offer
the same fpi sale To the highest bidder
for casa in hand ON the 10Th day of
March A u 1895 at the front door If
the court house in Logan, Harrison
county, Iowa, AT the hour OF lOo'clocl,
a. m. OF SAID day, when and where due
attendance will be given by the under
signed.
Dated at Logan Iowa, this 10th day
of February, 1906.
a. Shinn
f22 Sheriff, Harrison Co, Iowa
Dunlap Reporter, Feb. 9th
Dunlap today has for its guests
the beauty and intelligence of
the county the school "marms
are with us. Girls, you are
welcome doubly so. The may
or has thrown open the city
gates and hidden the keys, SO
you are privileged to take pos
session of the town. It's yours
for the present. Make the
best of it. May this visit be a
social as we'll as intellectual
treat for you and Us.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15
keeps Then, Aired.

AeCpA Ihcm AIRED.
Mrs. Chattcrbox is an incessant talk.
err isn't she!'
Yes; she says that II PERSONS opin-
ions get musty IL they aren't aired
often. Detroit Free Press.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15

The following ads were sent
t. one Of the great western
daiiies: We give green trad
ing stamps 10 greenhorns; our
carpets can't be beat; while
passing through our store you'll
find pocketbookss greatly reduc-
ed; special today, women's slip
pers and boys pants away down:
ladies tailor made suits half off
groceries, we sell imported
Swiss cheese with all the holes
cut out; seal skin sacques made
to order, ladies can furnish
their own skin; restaurant
our dried apples in a little wa
ter make a swell lunch; our
graduated sugar is very fine.
II you don't like it you can
lump it. Ladies bathing suits
cut almost to nothing.
-A G"e-
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15
Farmers ! lew.

Farmer View. :
The following is from q Mis-
souri, farmers ad ress before a
farmers institute: s'As a rule
the farmer knows no hrmer
friend than the county press.
The home paper is distinctly
the farmer S own paper. suppor-
ted directly or Indirectly by the
tanners who compose the back
bone e nc printers subscrip-
tiaa lis5, and largely for what
the eilterpl'ising merchant adj
vel.tises, Now brothers, let us
not forget our friends Let US
see thar our subscription is paid
before the first Of January and
Il year in advance il We can af-
ford it. 'fhemau OF paper that
fights my battles shall have my
support. Another ching, the
merchants who advertise are
the ones who make il possible
for Us to get . GOOD local paper;
and the man OF liim who are
too penurious to advertise and
help support the local press
have no right to the farmers
patronage. propose hereafter
to go to a good live local adver-
tiser and a man who will do his
share in supporting the local
press, thus contributing to my
support, rather than buy Of a
man who proposes to take all
give nothing inreturs. F" Elk.
From the annual report of tie
Capital Traction company, ope-
rating the street railway of
Washington, appe ars thatcon-
siderably more than half the
persons injured on the conpa-
ny's lines in 1905 owed their
hurts to disobedience of the rule
that prohibits passengers from
enterning of leaving a moving
train or car. The number of
persons injured in the year was
4O3. and the causes of their ac-
cidents are classified thus;
Stepping off moving car 1.339
Attempt to board moving car rs
Collision with pedestrians, 80
Cars started while alighting, Is.
Cars starting while getting on 6.
Fell in car, 6
Hand crushed in gate, 9
Collision of cars, 81
Struck by pole, 2
Collision with bicyclist, 8
Fell from moving car, as
Employees, ID
That is 217 of the unfortu-
nate 4O3 would have escaped
injury if they had not been in
so great a hurry to board orqult
the cars. EX.
Cuba is a paradise for poul-
try. Open ranges may be used
the year round; the native grass
es give excellent forage, and
the birds will thrive, particularly
if the range has a few trees.
The sunfiower grows to an enor-
nous size, and its seeds are re-
cognized as being among the
best poltry foods. No winter
quarters are necessary, and
there are no providing animals
to prey upon the young chick
ems, and best OF all, not much
capital is required to make a
success of the business in the
mild climate. There is a fortune
for the men and women who
will establish dairy farms and
supply the public with pure
clean un allied milk at a fair
price there for milk must be
sailed to preserve it. This dali
ry product retalIs for 20 cents a
quart, and if you call for a glass
Of it at cafe, You must pay
fifteen cents.
The following ads were sent
t. one of the great western
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15
It Sometime. Fails

"There's nothing like perseverance.
It wins out in the long rum"
"Not always. Did you ever see a hen
on a porcelain egg Brooklyn Life
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15

Try our Laxative Quinine
Compound tablets for colds, Csc.
j. d. Brown & Son.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15
The question of. railroad rate

The question of. railroad rate
legislation is still an important
topic with the people of the
country. Ever since President
Roosevelt suggested the idea
the people have gradually been
drawing closer together and to-
day few can be found who OPP
pose railroad rate legislation.
There is no longer any doubt as
to the wishes of the people.
They are with the President in
the matter an I long to see it
brought to a crusiai test. Dun
lap Reporter
1t is just as true today as it
ever was that the safest and
most honorable way for a man
to secure q competence is t. do
it little by ,istle, taking a life
time tot the work. The haste
to be rich and make money
fast is Che economic curse of
America today. Every man
wants TO draw Il prize in the
busin SIS lottery and Is seldom
indeed that he is content with
small savings and safe invest
Iments.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-15
A nit Of Good Advice.

A hit of Good Advice.
One Of the best things to do lr:.
we criticise others much is to !
an intelligent study of ourselves
eago Journal.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1906-09-03
THE AUDITORIUM.

A genuine Jessie Shirley audi
ence packed the Auditorium last
night for the season opening with
the company in the THE Lily and
the Prince" The play, drawn from
10th century Italian intrigue, is be-
comingly customed and well
enough presented to satisfy. Jessie
Shirley, as the innocent girl cast
into the thick of Roman conspiracy
is somewhat stronger than in the
company's usual run. AS the no.
torious Lucrezia Borgia, Adelaide
Laird Is tough but not cody wicked
and her part suffers in proportion.
Big George McQuarrie as the fiery
Italian lover in doublet and hose
seems to lack something-perhaps
it's trousers-but he handles his
part pretty well, the same being
true of the balance of the cast.
The Lily and the Prince" will be
the bill for this week.
The Auditorium has been touch
ed in gold trimming and the result
is harmonious and pleasing.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1906-09-03
KING EDWARDS AMERICAN CHUM

railroad globe trotter million
Cincinnati du chess has removed the of
given the anxious public the anthem
tic story exclusive
arch Europe
king good head and that it
sets make life
one joyful song fol- Brtains monarch t7Fa
that is only the shank end of Mr. Zmmermans approval
king" kind"
course question that word "our." 1t
Pierpont Morgan whom it rumored skun by
$15OOOO0 the c. H D. deal it might refer
a himself in the old days
anyhow. Zimmerman it all right.
He chummed King Ed in democratic He told
Ireland Roosevelt and how railroad
when the jelly refuses to el 1t is
revealed the impressive fact that the duke
bed with the king and that the
thinks duke bright and calls him Little KIM, and
hopes that he is going have future.
bully know that plain American railroad
Europe good stories with king and
entente cordiale tightly couldn't smash it with
hammer Daughter and in law and is Royal Hghness
reaches England Tanda
mediate reaching for a club. He'll like it.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1906-09-03
Az che 1rh@@&ers

cal comedy in condensed form and
it made a decided hit with the
audience at the initial perform
ance The Tebeau Souave girls, 10
petite maidens, march and drill
as a single unit and not an order
Is given during the entire act, all
of the maneuvers going by the
sound of a whistle The Tuscano
brothers juggle with Roman battle
axes, their performance being one
of the strong features of the pro-
gram. John H. w. Byrne is the
best single handed talker who has
been heard here in some time. A
clever musical number is Loves
Strategy" in which Charles
Homan sings a number of classical
selections. Miss Newton assumes
the character of a Swedish servant
girl Charles Altman sings when
the Whippoorwill Sings Margue-
rite"
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1906-09-03
READY
FOR ANOTHER
KILLING

The Ekanops will make the most
of the three nights left them for
iniation and the torture chamber
is now in waiting for Monday night
when the following well known
citizens will be led like lambs to
the slaughter:
Colonel I. n. Peyton, John S.
Huetter, R. S. Oakley, A. w. Siegel,
I. J. Galbraith, l. s. Silvers, R. T.
Seymour, Harry B. DeLange, G. c.
Laib, w. Lerch, John H. Shaw, D.
A. Darling, ]. ]. White, G. V.
Yeager, Isaac Dornberg, J. S. Phil
lips, Frank B. Gregg, w. o. Parker,
Harry c. Hayward, Fred w. Boil
drick, R. H. Dunn, George P. Lar
sen, Dean w. Peterson, Rudolph
Dorm, Louis Martin, H. d. Turnkey,
James J. Prendergast, Cyrus l..
Smith, F. B. Tichenor, NJ. S. Gard
ner, Nick Norman, H. A. Arnold,
George H. Williams, E. X Erwin,
R. e. NJ. Strickland
Oriental costumes guaranteed to
wilt the sagebrush 90 miles away
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1906-09-03
AT
LARGE IN CITY

The police today are bending
every effort to locate an alleged
firebug who last night set fire to
the residence of Rev. E. c. Dow
ney. pastor of the Universalist
church, Howard street and Fifth
avenue.
Positive evidence that the fire
was started by an incendiary has
been secured in the statement of
Mrs. Crabtree, a member of the
congregation. who saw the refec-
ton of a mans head and shoulders
in Mr.. Downey's bedroom.
Assistant Fire Chief Joyce made
the fact of incendiarism doubly GER
tain when, on investigation, he
found that a blaze had been started
in three places. Under the tele-
phone box there was found the
charred remains of a tightly rolled
showing this was used
in carrying the flame from one
place to another.
The fire was first discovered
about $3.50 p. m. while the congre-
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1906-09-03

ton was at church. The depart
ment was called and had it out
before much damage was done.
More proof of what seems to be
a deep plot for the destruction of
the Spokane Traction company's
grandstands and pavilions came to
light Saturday night when the pa
vilion at Mantle park was set aflre
and damaged to the extent of
$4,000. Officials of the company
have no doubt that this was done
by an incendiary who has some
fancied grievance. 1t was only a
few weeks ago when an effort was
made to destroy the Recreation
park grandstand. but the fire
which had just started. was dis
covered in the nick Of time by
a street car man whose car had
just finished the run to that point.
The police believe the same per-
son is responsible for both fires.
The pavilion was not insured. 1t
will be rebuilt Immediately and on
a larger plan.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1906-09-03
ALEXHADER q


Prof. Alex. Bell, inventor or the
telephone, is experimenting up in
Canada with a new-fangled alrshlp.
It is operated by wireless electr1-
cal energy supplied from the earth
A short preliminary test mas
been made with success, and Prof.
Bell is arranging for a "fy" from
Toronto to London, Ont, which, 1t
is believed, will be a severe and
convincing test.
Prof. Bells machine differs ma
terially from those Of Santos-Du-
mont and Prof. Langley. 1t is a
kite, not a balloon, nor an aero
plane.
Ite lifting power is estimated to
he 700 pounds, and after this had
been demonstrated, Prof. Bells on
ly problem was to get a motive
power sufficient to drive it at least
IS miles an hour. He has appar-
emily succeeded with the wireless
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1906-09-03

Pretty little golden-haired Win
fred Bender, of Milwaukee, aged 4
Gang give Humpty Dumpty cards
and spades.
She didn't fall from an ordinary
wall either but from a second-story
window anw with such violence
that she broke in the sidewalk
where her head struck,
Then, instead of requiring the
services of all the kings horses
and all the kings men, she sobbed
a minute on her papa's shoulder,
and when the doctor arrived, eX-
pecting to find boens broken and
internal injuries in her little bruis-
ed and mangled body. she was out
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1906-09-03

ed my name in conversation, but
for that | care not, since he paid
ne well for my work. Now and
then so some say, he would put his
hand on his back and after groan-
ing a bit remark, Gardening is
tough on the back"
The master and | had many con-
versations on gardening, but one
of them stands out apart from all
the others. I was digging potatoes
when he came up and said, mot
very pleasant work"
"'Tain't so bad" I replied. 81
don't mind it,"
But it is such useless work"
mo, sir, | think not. 1t brings
potatoes. Can't get 'em without
work"
You don't understand. 1t should
not be necessary to dig them and
it would not be if the gardener be-
fore you had understood his husi.
ness. He was an ignoramus, and
planted the potatoes upside down
so that they grew down instead of
up. Had he planted them right
side up you would have been spar
ed all this trouble"
set him right regarding pota-
toes, and he laughed
zone must live and learn" he
observed. But how many of us
live and don't learn"
Ito DO continued)
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1906-09-03
THE SPOKANE.

Farm life and fun is the base of
Uncle Josh Perkins" at the Spo-
kane theater last night for double
engagement embracing a matinee
this afternoon and evenings per-
formance Comedy Is the ruling
tenor of the play with enough of
the serious size carried to balance
the portrayal.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1906-09-03
LABOR DAY 60 NIB
EXPLODES

ST. LOUIS, Sept. 3.-One dying
and ID injured, several seriously,
are the results of the late explo-
sion of a bomb sent up to announce
the moving of the Labor day parade
this morning. Fragments of the
shell flew in all directions among
the crowd.
The bomb was the last of a
series touched off by Grand Mar
shall Scheller. 1t was defective. A
panic followed the explosion and
many people were crushed in the
mad rush to escape. Sche1ler was
arrested.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1906-09-03
HELD UP BY TRAMPS

Joseph Heyer has reported to the
police that while he and another
man were getting out of box car
at Marshall junction Saturday night
two trampish looking men showed
revolvers in their faces and robbed
them of S3S, their combined
wealth, and a gold filled watch.
Heyer and his companion had
been riding on a freight train and
when stop was made at Marshall
got out to stretch.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1906-09-03

said the chauffeur Kindly give
me a check for the amount"
The master wrote a check and
handed it to the chauffeur, who
left the room. Turning to me, the
master said, "Tillman, the insane
asylums and poorhouses are full of
smarter people than l am"
One acre of the masters beauti-
full farm was in wheat, which was
harvested in July. The yield was
light, still it was something The
farmer and | threshed the wheat in
August and turned over five bush
els of grain to Mr.. Allrox. He was
much delighted.
I'VE should do better, next year,
however" he said. 81 don't think
it was hoed and weeded properly.
If necessary, I'll hire a man to
help"
| was having fine luck in the gar
den, providing not only enough
vegetables for the house, but also
giving an occasional basket of peas
beans, corn and other things to
the master to take to his friends
in the city. | learned after that
the man who received a gift of this
kind paid dearly for it, the master
forcing him to listen to much con.
versation on gardening, the beauty
OF having things fresh from the
soil. and all that. l have been told
too, that the master never mention
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1906-09-03
THE WASHINGTON.

"Mam'selle Manhattan the
feature act at the Washington
theater for the week, which open
ed yesterday afternoon, is a musi-
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1906-09-03

have been ordered for the Ekanops'
use on carnival night at the inter
state fair.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1906-09-03

The Spokane Press delivered to
your house for Csc a month. Tele
phone Main 375.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1906-09-03

in the yard playing a game of tag,
as though falling from second
story windows was an everyday
occurrence.
Providence" was the laconic
explanation given by the doctor,
of the miraculous escape.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1906-09-03

method. A 20 horsepower engine
driving two propellers 200 revolu-
tons a minute he thinks will en-
able the ship to proceed against
the wind. Before the wind it is
probable that the machine would
make 140 miles an hour with little
effort.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1906-09-03
CHAPTER TX.


What do you want?' the master
asked.
Here is a bill" the chauffeur
replied, handing this statement to
the master:
Repairs to buggy, damaged in a
runaway caused by automobile
soaring horse $4,000
Doctors bill, woman injured in
runaway .......'.. ll0.UO
Damages for injury to woman
OUD
Repairs to automobile .... $50
Fines, month of August 49,. 60
Bail forfeited ............. 230
OldI 9l 20
IT / l. 7 r