The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1906-06-29
SUPREME COURT jokes.
Some Of the Venerable Jurists Uan
be Witty When They Have
&&l A Mind to. ,' ~

R. NJ. Larner in News and Courier.
8s% Probably the last place a person
: would visit in quest Of humor would
be the room in the capitol occupied by
the supreme court of the United
States. Members of that dignifed
tribunal sometimes relax, however,
and indulge in pleasantries among
themselves and at tho expense Of
counsel appearing before them. Chief
Justice Waite had vein Of dry hui
NOR concealed under his black silk
robe, which occasionally manifested
itself in his dealings with his brothers
Oh the bench and lawyers practicing
before the court Of last resort in this
country.
The Heavy Weight" of the Bench.
David Davis, who weighed over 300
pounds, could justly be described as
"jolly old Judge" lie had the rep
utation of being n good story teller
and on many occasions he disconccrt-
cd his associates on the bench, as we'll
as practitioners at the bar, by his
asides, audible throughout the cham
her. He frequently embarrassed at
torneys by clever and humorous sug-
gcstions.
Jpsticc Gray, Of Massachusetts, was
prone to indulging in contentious over
trivial details which were often hui
mOTOuS.
A Birds Eye Argument Overruled.
On one occasion Attorney General
Harmon was arguing q case involv-
ing possession Of certain public lands.
With view to presenting the case Of
the government rs clearly as possible
the attorney general hung up in the
court room maps showing the location
and dimensions Of tho land in dispute.
Justice Gray was opposed to maps.
charts or other exhibits in the court
room. claiming they were not only I'M
slightly, hut reflection upon the in
telligcncc Of the court. lie entered 4
vigorous protest against the action of
the attorney general. who replied that
he had brought the exhibition TO aid
him in placing the ease comprchcn-
sivcly before the court. I simply in
troducc them to give a bird : eye view
of the territory involvcd."
81 have not the eve of bird.' re-
torted Judge Gray. "and therefore
: your maps arc worthless so far as I
am conccmed.'
Won His Case by His First Paragraph
Within the recollection of the old
est employee of the supreme court
probably the most amusing Incident oc-
currcd soon after the close of the civil
war. \ case was brought by a Louis
lana lawyer, L. Madison Day. against
!. c. Micou I" recover property talk
en- from relative of Mr.. Day under
the coniiScation act Of the reconstruct
tion period. Mr.. Day was a pictures
que figure. with long yellow hair pro-
fuscly oiled and iollcd up at the back
and sides. rufflcd shirt front, stock
and collar. dark green Prince AL
bert coat. buff trousers and long
boots.
When the day arrived for argument,
although the court did not convene
until noon, Mr.. Day made his appear
ancc in the chamber about 9 'clocll
in the morning and busted himself ar
ranging books and papers to be used
in presenting his side of the case.
When the crier declared the court
open every table and large portion
of the floor was covered with law
books for the use Of Mr.. Day. Calling
the case, the clerk announced that Mr..
Day was present, but the other side
would submit their case in a printed
brief without argument.
Therenpon Mr.. Day arose, bowed
profoundly to the members of the
court, took a few sips of water, suck
ed lemon and made several flourish
eS with a red bandanna handkerchief.
Then reading from an elaboratcly
decorated and printed brief Of sever
al hundred pages. copy of which is
still preserved in the archives Of the
court, Mr.. Day said: "May it please
the court, when the Bonny Blue flag
went down before the Star Spangled
Banner, that glorious emblem of the
union, the constitution and the en-
forcemcnt of the law again waved in
Triumph ....
~ tEr0m Mninn,S lnrl, ninnc nn2