Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1906-04-06
THAT MANIFESTO.
Old Ben Is Too Smart for the Preach
ers and the Tigers.


Old Ben Is Too Smart for the Preach
ers and the Tigers.
Editor Yorkville Enquirer.
Well Mr.. Editor Old Ben has spok-
en-. and while it may be the same old
pones," they are sound and good and
Juicy for all that. What's the matter
then with you newspaper fellows that
you raise such a racket? You caa't
stomach the charge of a plot, eh? Now,
look here, Mr.. Editor, you think you
and your ilk are smart, but I'll show
YOU that we horny handed sons of
toir' know a thing or two ourselves.
Let me give you a few historical notes.
It's always been so. They've been
fighting Old Ben from the very start.
Follow me bit. 1t hasn't been so long
ago-oaly six years ago-since Old
Ben unearthed that plot Of the preach
er. All! it was a beauty; for ways
that were dark and for tricks that
were vain," indeed peculiar" When
it was generally supposed that Bishop
Duncan was out in the wild and wool
ly west" attending to his episcopal
duties, why my simple minded friend
he was Only down on "Chicco Street"
in old Charleston, Matching this. abom-
Unable treason. Why, sir, 1t was hint
ed-mOre than hinted--then, and no
body in his senses, but believe 1t to this
day, that all that boasted twentieth
century fund" (for "education' they
said) was only the Methodist preach
er's part of the Doodle with which
Chicco & Co, were going to upset the
dispG nSary.
| tel you Bishop Capers was not
elected to preside over this diocese for
his beautiful Christian graces Of mind
and manners alone. No, sir! They re-
membered his record il the Darling
ton war;" and knew they could depend
on him to carry out their fell designs,
as he went into every nook and corner
of the old State.
And those willy Baptists! First they
put up Featherstone two years before,
Just to feel the foe; and now, when
all things seemed ripe, here they came
with "one Of their very own" ex-editor
Cup to all the villainous tricks of the
trade); ex-Confederate (fourishing
that old crutch of his just to rally the
boys)-why, sir, the plot came then
within an inch Of success!
But Old Ben scented the danger, saw
through the whole scheme, and was
man enough to take the bull by the
horns, and it makes me laugh to think
of it even yet-he gave them such a
tongue lashing that it has taken them
six years to ask what's the matter"
and be fool enough to try it again. o,
Mr.. Editor, q say it with tearsD there
are few like him left. Such a scent
for treason and all dirty politics"
Such a tongue to lash the preachers
lack to their proper place! Such bod
ness-afraid of "dignitaries?' not be.
No, Stree, Old Ben is up to whole
cowpen full Of preachers, with all the
bishops, elders and deacons thrown In
for good measure. He has slain them,
heaps upon heaps, withN-well. never
mind the rest of it. Judges XIV, 10.
But, as l said, the preachers and the
cranks and the old barroom keepers
are at 1t again. Now, the Presbyteri-
ans are taking their turn-the dyed-in
the-wool utterly utter" Psalm singing
sort. They are trying their hand and
what "fine Italion hand" ii Is! They
pretend that their headquarters are In
York, but 1t is really, as Old B. n says.
I'm the State newspaper office. IL Is
whispered that an underground way
goes from that nest of treason to the
speakers desk in the hall of the house
of representatives, while branch
reaches even to the midst of our noble
senator's garden of roses at Trenton;
and o, it is horrible to contemplate
they mean to blow him up, either as
he ''testifies" in Columbia, or else as
he squats among his flowers in Tren-
ton There's only one consolation. Old
Ben's got his eyes peeled.
You notice. Mr.. Editor, that this ul-
derground work looks straight to Old
Ben, and not TO the dispensary. All!
that is il. They are after him. They
know they can't beat him in fair
fight, and so they attack him through
the dispensary. Mr.. Editor, 1t Is just
too bad. When everything was so
lovely; when the ERA of good feeling
had come, and Charleston even seemed
asleep i'm his vestpocket; when he
could say as Louis XIV. Il am the
State" ., it was rank heresy and
treason to hatch such a design! and
when our noble Ben had wrought such
wonders i'm the senate too! Just think
of it all. Cuba freed, the Philippines
pacified, Russia and Japan shaking
hands. the German emperor made TO
take a back seat; and, better still, the
south again in the saddle, the Stren-
uous president as meek as a lamb, and
the big stick itself dangling from
the belt of our own "noblest Roman
of them all" Yes. sir, what jeff Davis
and Lee and Jackson and the rest fall
ed to do with shot and shell ana
sprried hosts, our own Old Ben has
done with Il few fierce jabs with his
pitchfork. l ask, Mr.. Editor, 'and
pause for a reply" l ask. is not he a
public enemy who dares to touch this
high parsonage?
1t is dreadful. too to think of the re-
suit of all this-if, indeed, by any
chance this dark plot should succeed;
our fair state bereaved of this great
moral institution; this fairest, sweet
est flower plucked from her brow; no
bars and no schools, but her men cry
ing for drink. and her children for
knowledge, and Charleston, how dire
her fate! Tillman, who gave her the
exposition and the naval station, and
the diSpenSary. and deep water on the
bar. and Hampton Park, and Goose
Creek water, and Chicco, and-and-
well everything that makes her grand
and glorious. Yes. Tillman, now
against her. and l picture the dcsola-
ton: no more deep water, no pore big
ships, no naval station, no Isle of
Palms, no dispensary; but worse than
the thirst of Sahara, with not even
Goose Creek and Chicco left, but only
a few rain barrels to make things just
Il little endurable.
Mr.. Editor, this is no joke. Tillman
is the State, and the sooner we learn
it the better. Too many vital interests
hang upon him for us to trif1e. The
bishops should be unfrocked; the in
fcrior clergy stript of their little brief
authority: pulpit bench, and bar should
be seized by the truly loyal" and Ben
jamin Ryan Tillman should be given
full dictatorial powers, and made
Grand Dispenser of Free Speech i'm
South Carolina.
Yours for Ben,
CIVPTAS.
Rural Retreat, S. G.