The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1906-05-24


cised for giving poor people 80 MANY
babies, and leaving so few in the homes
or the rich, and the nurses saw he
brings all the babies at the same time.
SO that they have more than they can
40 for while, and then for weeks and
weeks are idle The Man heard fell
low who was buying cigars upon the
new arrival of little girl venture the
remark that he had two girls in the
family now and rather hoped for
boy. Most men think enc girl is
worth two or three wild, harum-
skarum" boys any time. That old stork
certainly has his troubles.
When lot of Methodists get to-
sether they are as certain to tell
yarns as lot of horse traders. But.
their yarns concern church matters.
A certain preacher tells the Man about
holding services one night when there
was no choir. He asked a deacon to
lead inisong. The deacon started envy
soul be on thy guard ten thousand
tongues arise" but he pitched the
tune too high, and only got as far as
ten thousand" when his voice gave
out. A broker who had strayed into the
church, forgot himself. and thinking
tnat ne was on the board of trade,
shouted: "Too high! Start 'er at five
thousand"
Some women were eating ice
cream at a certain ice cream parlor to-
DAY and got to talking about curiosity,
The Man dropped in for cooling drink
and overheard the conversation, One
woman said that once she was shop-
ping, and had small package that
bulged out good deal. and was queer
looking. A woman she barely knew
came up and said Excuse me.
please, but what have you in that
package? 1t looks so odd" Another
woman said that when she was girl
she went to concert one evening with
a young man, and that during the
evening an usher walked quickly down
the aisle holding note in his hand.
which he passed over the footlights
to an orchestra player. The woman
says that when the usher came back
down the aisle she wanted to sink
through the floor as her escort leaned
forward, and grabbing the usher by
the arm, said in an audible whisper:
What was in that note?"
Some young married people were
talking about kissing, before marriage.
last night and one man said he had
kissed good many girls before his
marriage, but he had never kissed one
IN his life unless he knew she was
willing. The only married woman who
talked" was one whose husband is out
OF town. She said that when she was
girl, the young men were very kind
to her and took her to all the dances
and theatres, and that when they took
her home. if they kissed her good
night she did not make fuss over
1t; that she thought they had given
her good time and if it was any
pleasure for them to kiss her, they
were welcome. The women whose hus-
bands were present almost tainted.
There is a certain shiftless man not
far from this city who is married to
worthy, hard working woman. The
man comes down town aft.,' breakfast
every day, and sits around in stores,
shops and Offices where he is not
wanted. At noon, he sneaks home to
get his dinner. and the neighbors say
his manner of getting into the house is
very amusing; he chops wood awhile,
and, when he enters the house, carries
an armful of wood. His wife scolds
Htill d SoOu uedl dUOuC his SnlICleSS
habits, but it does no good. She is
now talking of turning him out. She
has done that several times, but he
always cries in front of the house at
meal times and at bed time. and she
finally gives him another trial" His
wife has never caught him flirting
and he is good natured, but his lazi-
ness is colossal.
The most peaceable man in the
world is liable to get into trouble if
he plays cards.
There are certain things the people
won't stand. Don't tempt them to
throw at you.
All the letters married man gets
are short ones, If he is perfectly
proper man.
There are too many people whose
conversation is like this: ?, ?, 2, ?, 2.
70. 2. ?: etc.
This is rather sure rule: If
man has accumulated money he is
smart.
When the groom is shorter than the
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