davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09

stand on the corners when the parade
goes By, ard never crack a smile, or
act interested. and when the parade
has passed they 90 to the circus lot
and see the balloon ascension, and
stand on wagon wheels and try to
look over the side Of the tent at the
performance, and then they kick be.
cause the audience on the back seats
cuts off their view from the wagon
wheels
Last year our show killed a Quaker,
and the community Is down on us.
The Quaker got in the show because
he owned a half inch of ground that
Its tents were on, and he stood right
by the ring. and when the champion
female rider was suspended In the air
between two bareback horses, he
leaned over too far inside the ring.
and she kicked his nat clear up to the
roof OF the tent. and female trapeze
down on it on the trapcZe. The old
Quaker had heart disease and fell
dead. What the Quakers complained
Of WIS that after the Quaker's re-
mains had been removed from the
ring, that the show went right on.
They claimed that we ought to have
shown proper respect to the dead by
closing the show for 20 DAYS. and
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09

than struck the fire in a sitting posi-.
ton, and filled the air with the od0r
Of fried buckskin, before the whole
tribe jumped on Pa, and they kicked
him with their moccasins. and were
going to murder him, while the chief
who acted as the burnt Offering, got
out OF the fire, and sat down in the
cold mud to cool himself He held
up his hand as a signal for attention,
and he called q council OF war, while
the squaws sat on pa to hold him
down.
The council of war sentenced pc to
be burned at the stake, and they tied
him to a tree and began to pile
sticks around him, and pa told me to
go to the circus lot and give an alarm.
and send the hands to rescue him.
G0e. but didn't run though. and yell
an alarm big enough for massacre
told the hands, who were sleeping
under the seats, or playing cards on
the trunks that the Indians were
burning pa at the stake, and some of
the hands said that would serve him
right, and the fellows that were play.
ing cards said they didn't want TO
break up the game when they were
losers, to rescue no baldheaded cur.
mudgeon. : thought pa was goner,
sure. canse cculd hear the indians
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09
OVER SEA HABIT.
Difference on This Side the Water

Difference on This Side the Water.
The persistent effect upon the heart
Of caffeine In coffee cannot but result
In the grayest conditions, In time,
Each attack of the drug lard That
means each cup Of Coffee weakens tho
organ q little more, aud the end is al-
most matter OF mathematical demon
s,ration. 4 lady writes from a West
crn state.
II am Of German descent and it was
natural that | should learn at a very
early age to drink coffee. Until was
% years old | drank scarcely anything
else at my meals.
"A few years ago began to be af-
fectcd by n steadily increasing ncrv-
business, which eventually developed
into distressing heart trouble that
made me very weak and miserable.
Then, some three years ago, was added
asthma in it's worst form. My suffer
ings from these things can be better
imagined than described
During all this time my husband
realized more fully than did that cof-
fee was injurious to me, and made
every effort to make me stop.
Finally it was decided few months
ago to quit the use Of coffee absolute
ly, and to adopt Postum Food Coffee
as our hot table drink. had but little
idea that It would help me, but con-
scented to try 1t 10 please my husband.
prepared it very carefully exactly
according to directions, and was de.
lighted with its delicious. flavor and
refreshing qualities.
Just so soon as the poison from the
coffee had time to get out of my sys-
tenn the nutritive properties of the
Postum began 20 build me up, and l
am now fully recovered from all my
nervousness, heart trouble and asthma
gladly acknowledge that now, for the
first time in years, enjoy perfect
health, and that owe 1t all to Pos.
tum." Name given by Postum Co.
Battle Creek. Mich.
There's n reason. Read the little
book, THE Road to MELVILLE" In
pkgs.
Postum Food Coffee contains nc
drugs Of any description whatsoever
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09

and drive them of, but he said he
hadn't no time to go and wake up the
police, and they wouldn't get around
anyway before the middle Of the
week. So pa took a tent stake and
started for the green corn roast. The
Indians were taking turns dancing
and eating roasted corn, and they had
barrel OF beer, and | knew enough
about Indians to keep away from
them when they mix beer with green
corn, for it has about the same Of.
feet as committing suicide with car
bulir acid.
Pa put his hat on one side of his
head and went right into the midst
Of the Indians and grabbed chief
called one Ear at IA Time, and hit
him with the tent stake and knocked
him down. and said, Now, you cit"
Well, sir, that Indian had no more
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09

wearing Grape GA our arms, but a cir.
Gus is not built that way,
Ordinarily II may be quiet enough
in Philadelphia on Sunday. but pa
found that he had more Of run for
his money than at any place we have
been so far We haze had a tribe Of
Indians with our Wild west depart.
mont all summer, ana IA has not
stood very well with the Indians since
he was In charge Of the show at Fort
Wayne, and they all got drunk, and he
had them tied up to the poles around
the ring until they got sober. They
have laid for pa ever since, and IL
vas only a matter VI time when ley
got him Then at pi,tshurE our man.
ager picked up a company OF canni'
balls that had got lett over from the
St. Louis fair and who agreed to per.
form for their board and clothes, aud
us they don't wear any clothes to
speak NJ, and only eat dog week days,
and hope to get a human being to
roast ON Sunday. II seemed pretty
good bargain.
Well, tho indians gut permission 10
hold green corn dance in Il piece Of
woods near tho circus lot, and the
management got them a wagon load
NJ corn. and they had built a fire and
we're roasting the corn, and dancing,
and pa didn't know about H. and just
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09

A few years ago George F. Haley,
Of Didieford, was trying his first Grim.
ina case before the supreme judicial
court OF Maine. with chief Justice
John A. Peters on the bench MIR.
Haley was in the middle Of his plea
when man in the audience fell over
in a ronyulsion The young lawyer
stopped. Disconnected Go on. sir. 20
on" sail he chief Justice; you're CIV
ing them fits"
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09
BABY COVERED WITH SORES.
Would Scratch and Tear the Flesh I'M
less Hands Were Tied-"Would
Have Died But for Cuticura."

my little SON. when about year and
q half old, began to have sores come out
on his face. | had a physician treat HIM,
but the sores grew wore Then they be.
gan to Gene on his AIMS. then on other
parts Of his body, AMI then one came on
his chest, worse than the others. Then
| called another physician Still he
grew worse. At the end OF about wear
and a half of suffering he grew so bad
! had to tic his hands in cloths at night
to keep him from scratching the sores
and tearing the flesh. lie got to be q
mere skeleton and was hardly able to
walk. My Aunt advised me TO try CUT.
cura Soap and Ointment. sent TO the
drug store and got n cake Of the Soap and
a box Of the Ointment and at the end Of
about two months the sores were all we'll.
He has never had any sores Of any kind
since lie is now strong and healthy,
and | can sincerely say that only for your
most wonderful remedies my precious child
would have died from those terrible sores.
Mrs. Fghcrt sheldon. t. 7. y. No. !,
WoodvlIn, Conn, April %, 1908, #"
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09

sharp pain in the
back, hca dn c h c s
and attacks OF dizzi-
ness. My eyes gave
out, and with the
languor aud sleep
lcssness of the dis
ease upon me |
wasted from 1914 to
122 pounds. At the
time | started using
Doan's Kidney Pills
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09

an abscess was forming on my right
kidney. The trouble was quickly
checked, however, and the treatment
cured me, so that ] have been well
since 1896 and weigh ISIS pounds"
Sold by all dealers. so cents n box.
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09

A yrnlreman gave as hIs reason for
desiring TO get ont OF grand Jury sorv-
fee physical disability What IS the
nature Of your inArmity?" asked the
fudge. Il am deaf in one ear, your
honor replied the man You'll DO"
said the Judge Don't you know YOU
only have to hear one side of a case
IN the grand jury rOOm?'
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09
Ladies Can Wear Shoes

On, size smaller after using Aliens Foot.
Ease. A certain cure for swollen, sweating,
hot, aching feet. At all Druggists, Doc. Ac'
ccpt no substitute. Trial package FREE
Addess A. S. Olmsted, lie Roy, n. Y.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09
By HON. GEORGE W. PECK
,CopusutDyLB uouissI

The Circus Strikes tho Quoinr City
They Go on p Ginger Ale Jng-Pa
Brooks Up an Indian War Dane.
and Comes Near Beng Burned
Alve-Thc Worlds ! mir Cannihals
Have n Roast Dog Feast
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09

"lts a curious fact" said Uncle Ebcn,
"dat lc man who alius seems to be dom
de mos hurryin' IL de man dats nIlu,
benin time" Washington Star.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09

kuirInr Has Jones an amnmobilet
Booker 80. but he can speak TN.
y sun.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09

Smokers have to call for Lewis Single
Binder cigar TO get it. Your dealer or
Lewis Factory, Peoria, III.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09

No man so nearly approaches n non
entity as prominent woman nus
band
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09
A Guaranteed Cure for Piles.

itching, Blind, Bleeding, Protrudtnp illes;
DRUGGISTS arc authorized to refund money II
PAzo OiSrMEST fails to cure inc 10 lidays. 700
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09

with the exception Of Yourself, every
body Is more OF less dcpcItlul,
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09
EnuIi.M IN IndIn

INK I"TI III ITWIN'
OF the natives Of India, about 2,OUO,-
600 con now read English.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09

Piso's Cure for Consumption is an intallt
bic medicine iur Cuug, and coius.--N. W
Samuel. Ocean Grove \. j.. Feb. Il. 1900
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09

Don't forget your servants aut
washerwoman.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1906-02-09

The ,,orld isn't any wurs" than It was
Thcn you were young. louvc merely
got onto IT,
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1906-07-12

the hall, and on to the library, which
stood somewhat apart in a wing. This
room was sacred to the master of the
house; guests rarely intruded unless
by particular invitation. When he had
established her comfortably, Blennen
turned away without : word and seat
ed himself at the piano.
A few dying notes, then silence. The
shaded light of the electric bulb still
shone softly, but the moonlight had
long danced from the waves. In its
stead, the mist over the river was
purpling warm with the summer dawn.
Blennen moved softly to the window
and stood looking down on the woman.
She gave no heed to his presence. The
dark lashes swept her cheek, her
breath rhythmed gently, she was
nestled luxuriously amid the cushions
she was fast asleep!
Suddenly, she opened her eyes and
stared into his face with the bewilder-
ment of a drowsy child.
why, good heavens, there must be
a fire." she exclaimed. See how light
it isl"
Blennen looked obediently.
so it u.s." he agreed.
at isn't light" she cried, mot day
light! 1t can't bel"
Il rather suspect it Is, though"
Blennen said, quietly.
And do you mean to say that I've
been right here in this chair since
eleven o'clock last night? Sound
asleep for hours?" she asked, with
amazement that was almost awe.
I'm afraid you have BEEN" Blennen
affirmed, apologetically.
But the widow was far from indig-
nation at this moment.
BLESS me-" she exclaimed, raptur-
ously, tits a miracle! I-asleep for
hours! l can't believe it. You are a
magician, Vance,"
Blennen seized his opportunity,
boldly:
Marry me, and I'll play you to sleep
any night you wish"
Instantly, the woman of the world
awoke to her knowledge of conven-
lions. Her eyes dilated a little, and for
a minute there was silence. Then she
turned to him with a face thk was
glowing:
Eyes, I will marry you now. Some
how. the fear has passed.
AYE, her nerves are the better for
Just these few hours of real Sleep
Blennen thought; but he had the wis
dom not to speak aloud.
But sucl a scandal" the widow
whispered as she drew her lips from
Blennen's.
Pooh! no one can know! And IL
they do"
And if they do-they will Taught"
Yes, they will laugh, as they did at
madame's story"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1906-07-12
e

"'He carries two wa-ards in his in
side pocket says his nibs.
"'Mebbe,' says |, that's what spoils
tn fit iv his coat
"'Niver tur-run down a ma-an like
that, says his nibs, payin' no attintion
to me little joke.
How'll | tell thin apa-art?' says 1.
"'Use ye-er head says his nibs.
"I thought says 1, we toll me We
d do tn thinkin' FIR this Office ye-er-
silf; an BESIDES l says, I niver took
a coorse in mind-r-readin'; t was
overlooked
AN there ye are" continued Po-
liceman Flynn. "On me OF beat had
to deal with tn common liars an tn
artistic liars, but tn politicians was
out iv it. Now t is only tn politi-
clans, an I w'ud MT thrust wan iy
thin to tell his W na-ame D. ye
know, if wan " thin liver come to me
an said, I m afther a job from his
nibs, l d faint away, l w'u'd so. Tn
shock Nv findin' so much honesty in
wan lump among tn gazabos thai
come to tn city hall w'u'd near Kill
me. But t is not their wa-ay.
az must see him. says wan. In
his family docther.'
where's ye-er tool-chist?' says l
KNOWN a docther always carries wan
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1906-07-12
When Their Auto Baked.

Robert Lee Morrell, chairman of the
Automobile association, started out for
a spin in his automobile the other day,
and everything worked finely until he
reached Broadway and Seventy-Secon
street. Then the machine baked, and
no efforts on his part could induce it
to go.
He worked away until he was rapid
ly getting into a state that he felt could
only be relieved by strong language,
but the presence of a group of children
made him refrain from expressing HIM
self. In the group was a little girl with
long golden hair and deep blue eyes.
She crowded close to the automobile
owner as he worked. Finally he became
so exasperated that it seemed as if he
really must say something, and, turning
to the little miss, he said:
Il wish you would run away, little
girl. There's a few things I'd like to
say"
go right ahead" said the child.
Don't mind me. My papa has an auto,
too."-Boston Post.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1906-07-12

lion years, but l can ha-ave it amy
day | r-reach fr it. An t w'u'ud be
all Fright, only his nibs do be a poll
tician, too"
Take him ut his word, anyhow"
advised Mrs. Flynn.
II did so,' returned Policeman
Flynn, 'an' FIR two da-ays me ba-adge
was like to dhrop off me coat, it hung
so loose. IT wa all along iv another
politician.
"'I',l be afther seein' tn may'r,' he
Gays, im~portant-like.
"'Ye IL not says |.
eye don't recognize me- says he.
"tI do not says 1.
"'Me fa-ace sh'u'd be familiar to We,
says he.
"'Mebbe It w'u'd be- says I. If I'd
lukked in tn r-rogues' galr'ry Nv
late
with that his nibs, hearin' voices,
comes out an gra-abs tn felly be til
hand an takes him in an threats him
like he was tn only fri'nd he had in
tn world. An when tn fellAys
gone, his nibs comes to me, an says,
Don't We know him?'
- do not, says |.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1906-07-12

1t was three in the afternoon of the
next day and the sun lay hot on the
oak groves and the air was full OF
warmth as we began to climb the slope
on which the road to Auch shoots out
of the track. The yellow bracken and
the fallen leaves underfoot seemed to
throw up light of themselves and here
and there a patch of ruddy beech lay
like a bloodstain on the hillside. In
front a herd of pigs routed among the
mast and grunted lazily; and high
above us a boy lay watching them.
1--WE part here" | said to my compan-
ion. 1t was my plan to ride a little
way on the read to Auch so as to
blind his eyes; then, leaving my horse
in the forest, I would go on foot to the
chateau.
"Tha sooner the better!" he an
swered, with a snarl. "And I hope !
may never see your face again, mon
sieur!"
But when we came to the wooden
cross at the fork of the roads and were
about to part, the boy we had seer
leapt out Of the fern and came to meet
us. "Hello!" he cried, in a sing-song
tone.
WELL" my companion answered,
drawing rein impatiently. What Is
it?"
There are soldiers in the village"
"Soldiers?" Antoine cried incredu-
lousy.
cay, devils on horseback" the lad
answered, splitting on the ground,
Three score of them! From Auch!"
Antoine turned to me, his face trans
formed with fury. Curse you'll" he
| cried. "This is some of your work!
Now we are all undone! And my mis-
tresses! Sacre! If l had tina, gun J
would shoot you like a rat!"
STEADY fool" I anwered roughly
II know no more Of this than VOC 'tc!'
ITO Be C~ontinusd.l
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1906-07-12

"He told me to CALL says an
other.
AN he toll me to lay FIR ye whin
We come says l.
"Oho! I'm good at re-partee. but 7
is like to get me into throuble, fr tn
wan | turn down tn ha-ardest is al.
ways tn only wan I ought to have
passed in. Some iv thin come livery
da-ay an wait an wait an wait, an
they gra-ab fellies goin' in an comm
out, an thry to get their inioo'nce
I'd be sorry FIR thin if it was MT fl
wan thing"
whats that" asked Mrs. Flynn.
why don't they work. FIR a Twin
instead iv wor-rkin' FIR a job? II i:
less disappointin', an no ha-ardel
whin we get used to it. But tn job ;!
too much FIR me. I'm goin' back or
tn beat again.
"F'r Why" asked Mrs. Flynn.
well, t was this wa-ay," explained
Policeman Flynn. I'D been scr-rap
pin with tin or ilivin fellies tina
wa-anted to see his nibs whin hi
nibs did MT wa-ant to see thin, an
along comes a little gazabo that s S
thin an ; pale ye'd think he'd bloy
away. But, FIR all that, he carrie
himself in a s~oo-peer-yer wa-ay, an me-
feelin' WRONG anyhow.
81 ray-ceived wor-rd,' says he, tina
somebody wants to see me here
CT is likely So says |, with sa-ar
casm, FIR that's tn OF gag.
"I think t is tn may'r,' says he
although tn wor-rd brought me wa
not plain on that
81 think It Is not says l. 4 think
from tn looks iv we, that tn ma-aI
who wants we is in tn n ofIic
on tn floor below
with that ne goes away, and viii
he comes back he tur-runs out to b
wan iv the biggest taxpayers in IL
city, IN a ma-an that livery wa
jumps r-round FIR; an back l go o
tn beat again. But t is me OF chop
house beat, thank Hiven! Ohio! bu
mebbe he wasn't mad!"
Where was it We sent him, Bar
ney?"
Why" replied Policeman Flynn
nonchalantly, II STINT tn little blood
less divil to tn coroner's Office, to b
sure"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1906-07-12
husband had been, 30 any other might

husband had been, 30 any other might
be.
Tonight, as Blennen reviewed the
words she had spoken to him. he felt
a swift indignation that she must still
suffer physically, as her insomnia
testified she did.
"No wonder she broods, II she can't
sleep nights" he muttered angrily.
I"What chance can I have?"
After a long silence, he spoke again.
and now very tenderly:
eff I could only play to her, for her
rest the night through"
He went to the window AID stood
looking out at the glory of the river
and the night. The spirit of the scene
crept to his ear and whispered her
name, and the memory of her and b
desire of her filled his soul.
One day the whole party sailed up
the river, and made a mountaineering
expedition into the Catskills. They did
not return until nightfall; and they
were hungry and weary. After din
ner the company was listless and
drowsy; very early, one after another,
they began to struggle off to bed.
Blennen came to Mrs. Morse.
I'm not the least bit sleepy" he
said to her, so low that no n could
overhear. "And I'm not tired. or
course. you're not sleepy yet; and,
even if you were, l suppose you
wouldn't dare to risk a nights sleep
lessness by going to bed so early. So
come into the library with me, and I'll
pay you Chopin for a while. Will
you? Dol"
at will rest me and soothe me-" she
said. 81 am so glad you thought OF
it,"
The great drawing-room was almost
deserted as the two passed out into
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1906-07-12
As the Mayors Special Policeman, He
Eas Trouble with Politicians and
Decides to Return to His Old Beat.
Copyright by the Century Coz

Copyright by the Century Coz
Copyright, 1906. by Joseph B. BowIes)
There do be three grades Nv
liars" said Policeman Flynn, in a
burst of confidence, to his wife.
"To which iv thin do We belong,
Barney?" she inquired, solicitously.
"G'wan, now!" retorted Policeman
Flynn. Yell be ~provokin' me to thry
to sell we to a comic pa-aper, We will
that. IT is no joke I'm tellin' ye.
There do be three gr-rades iv liars in
this world. First we have tn COM
mon liar, an t is easy carin' FIR him.
Mkt We have tn artistic liar, who can
dhress a lie up to ray-simble tn truth,
so IS We have to look fr tn sthraw-
berry ma-ark On tn lift arm to tell
which is tn other. An thin we have
tn politician, tn gr-reatest liar Nv
thin all"
Policeman Flynn shook his head
solemnly as he gave expression to this
great truth. He had had experience
and he knew whereof he spoke. He
had been the mayors special police
man for two weeks.
9TH common liar" he went on, "lies
FIR tn fun iv 1t, tn artistic liar lies
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1906-07-12

FIR 4 purpose, an tn politician lies
because It is his nature to. Poor felly!
he do be built that wa-ay.
81 wa-ant to see his nibs,' says tn
politician to me, doin' tn rush act an
thryin' to go by me.
"'Ye cannot says |.
".Ill have ye-er ba-adge,' says he.
Me cousin was a schoolmate iv his
nibs, an | do be bringin' him news
he'll be gla-ad to have. Yell see
him fa-all on me neck tn minute he
sees me.
$50 l lets the gazabo in, but does his
nibs fa-all on his neck? Ohio! we'll,
If he does, it do be with an ak, an me
own neck feels tn whir iv tn wind"
SERVES We right" commented
Mrs. Flynn. "Ye have 40 sinse at all,
Barney. IT is ye-er july to do what
We re told an lave others to do tn
thinkin'."
Listen to that, now!" exclaimed
Policeman Flynn. "Oho! but ye're a
sma-art woman. That's what his nibs
says to me. DO as we re told, Bar
ney,' he says, an Fave me to do tn
thinkin' FIR tn office. That ma-an
c'u'd MT get ye-er ba-adge in a mil