Meade County news. [volume] (Meade, Kan.) 1900-1918, 1906-09-27
HANKS
GRIZZLY
By HARRY IRVING GREENE
(Copyright)

THE queerest reptile ever 1 met" he
said, was up in Utah. Drifted into
Whisky Ike's parlor one evenin', and
feelin' pretty good, shot few holes
| through the ceilin, not meanin' no harm.
Bimeby down comes a little Teller with
nothin' on but his pants, shirt and
spectickles and looks me over. He was
funny lookin' critter. cock-eyed, long
body and short legs, like one of them
what do you call them dogs, Clawed,
what they bring up under bureau SO
their legs can't grown"
"Dachshunds."
eyes, 1 reckon them's it. His legs
was so short that when he stood up his
feet just touched the floor and that's all.
Prett' soon he says, I must insist that
you cease shootin' through my bedroom
1t is very annoyin', and if you do so
any more l will be compelled to take
the law into my own hands,
How SOL? l asks, curious enough
Well, he goes down in his pocket and
fishes around for spell like he had lost
somethin', and finally digs up a little
peewee, putty shootin' weppin about the
size of cigarette and holds it out in
front of him like woman h'ists up a
dead rat by the tail. I shall shoot back
says he, frownin'.
"For a minnut I was knocked speech
less, then I come to slowly. of all the
sawed-off, hammered-down, nail-bitin'
death-breathin', roarin', tearin' DULLES
ever seen, you are the wust,' says, and
turns away. But the next mornin', as
I was settin' speculatin' on the here
after, up comes this same little banty
and hires me to take him into the hills.
Come to find out he was buggist, one
of them fellers that is always stickin'
toads and reptiles to find out what
they are doin' when they are home and
in the buzzums of their families. Well,
we outftted in way that would make
a pals dinin'-car look like a lunch
counter and struck out, and immediate
that Teller commenced to get busy.
Every time he would see damned bug
a-crawlin' along the trail he wanted to
get off his cayuse and foller him home.
Durndest fool.
"About week afterwards seen that
we had jumped the claim of an old
grizzly First l noticed where he had
wallered and then rubbed up against a
rampike and slashed it with his claws
-settin' his trademark on it and stallin'
out his claim to that range | didn't say
nothin', but at last the dude seen it him
self, and blame me if he didn't know
what it meant-never was so surprised
in my life. He got interested at once,
buzzin' around here and there like fly
on a free lunch. Said he wanted to
take pictur of him with the little box
he had packed on his back, wanted to
foller him up and take his fotygraf at
clus range. 1 told him nothin' would
make me more happier; that / dearly
loved to set down beside a grizzly and
swap news with him-kind of fad of
mine-but that / always waited until a
circus come along before gratifyin' my
hankerin'
"'Oh, sugar! They won't hurt you,'
he answered. Don't be afraid. 1 have
read all about bears in books. and they
amt dangerous
@'That's all right, too, but suppose he
happens to be a gum chune bear?' I
asked.
GA what?' says he.
ga gum chune bear Never heard
of one? l am surprised that you didn't
read about them in your biography. A
gum chune bear is grouchy old bach,
or maybe dissipinted old maid, what
gifts down on sassiety and longs to wipe
it out. He noses around until he gets
big wad of spruce gum and he chaws
on that day after day to strengthen his
jaws. When he gets so he can chaw
crow-bar off first shot out of the box,
then he goes a-wooin' trouble. Better
go little careful with this bear, pard
he might be a gum chune.'
well, instead of scarin' the little
ious to spy the brute I should dearly
love ter see gum chune that I might
inspect his maxillaries,' says he, what
ever them might be. l didn't say no
more, but thought if a little, half
growed son of a microbe like him dast
stay in the same country with grizzly,
a full-growed man like yer Uncle Hank
ought not be afraid to walk up to
one and pull his whiskers out Well,
we camped there, and, sure enough,
couple of days after l run into the
tracks again, smokin' hot, so l hops
back right lively to camp.
"The buggist was backed up against
tree with pair of binders on. Said he
was examinin' the hairs on the legs of
skeeter to see what tribe he belonged
to, but when l told him 1 had rounded
up his game he dropped the inseck sud
den. Where is hep asks the little man.
About half mile up the gully yon-
der. Better straddle along right peart,
because 1 didn't tie him none too fast
says l.
Certain; to be sure. Had I best
take my weppin?' he says.
GAS you please says 1. But 1
wouldn't advise you to peck at him over
much with it. If you ever hit pore
bear with that piece of ordinance, there
wouldn't be enough left of him to pick
up on the pint of pin and examin'
through that maggifyin' machine Of
yourn' But he fetches it along, just
the same, and purity soon we come to the
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