Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-01-28

Two members dressed naval officers
appear.
We have here two suppress agents They
will suppress anything They are genuine
$4,000 Beauties
Suppress agents? They are even more
in line with my policy than press agents
would be-
Member comes in with lot of red, pa per
tape, such as they throw at carnivstls.
Stands in plaza and throws it around IN
discriminatory.
What do you think You are doing?"
why, I'm supplying the canal digsers
with something that is used more than
anything else in their work-red tape.
The two initiates presented and are
addressed by the official rooster.
For seven or eight years you, gentle
men, have been wandering aimlessly about
in the capital of your country. GU have
trapped sparrows when you should have
gone cunning for bear. a careful invest
cation of your records by the most dit
gent among us has failed to disclose any
thing you have done which would recon-
mend you for election as Grtdfroners. But
the time has come when We must add more
names to our list. Before you can be re-
ceived into full fellowship you must an
swer correctly the questions l shall pro-
pound in the name of the club. Let your
responses be prompt and loud
DO you, and each Of you believe in the
infallibility of the national administra-
tion?"
Each of the candidates. do" Cuckoo
whistle sounds)
DO you, and each of you, soemnly prom
Use to refer to the Speaker of the House
as tribunal of the people?'
Each of the candidates. DO CUCKOO
whistle sounds)
DO you, and each of you, solemnly prom
Use to denounce the Senate as as "a trai'orous
cabal of corporation hirehngs?
Each of the candidates. do" Cuckoo
whistle soundS.)
They are pronounced eligible, each is Sc
curely gagged amid the laughter of the
spectators and led away.
The musical features of the evening were
numerous and highly enjoyable, hitting off
public men and measures to the tunes or
popular songs. President Roosevelt was
the subject of one song, bit OF gentle
irony in which the fact was depiored that
the Hebrews didn't have Roosevelt to
lead them a quicker passage through the
Red sea; that the fathers didn't have MIN
to help win independence in Jiny, and
the like The good-na tured roast wound
up. however. in a kindly chorus, when ran
80 good luck TO you and good health to you,
We all give you a welcome here,
With a loud huzza and hip. hurrah
Now all Join In a rousing cheer
President Roosevelt laughed heartily at
all the cracks" made at him and the ad-
mnistration and took the good natured
toasting in the spirit 1t was intended.
One of the hits of the evenings enter
tanment was meeting Of the isthmian
canal commission on the plaza at anama.
Seated around a table. they planned out
the work with much dialogue.
Enter a messenger shouting: Cablegram
for the Gridiron Club! Cablegram for the
Gridiron Club" Chairman reads:
"Gridiron Club. Panama:
Just learned that canal commission was
kidnapped by unknown parties, supposed
TO be in employ of government, placed on
transport and forced to go to Panama.
Should be there by this time. Great ex-
element prevails"
The official policeman goes out to round
up the commissioners and meantime the
board discusses the employment of labor.
A typewriter is hired first, then chef, a
valet and a manicurist. The board COM
plains loudly at being compelled to come to
Panama: one member had dinner engage
ment another poker game and third
wanted to run over to Broadway.
A Bunch of "Chiefs."
The big policeman comes back with a
bunch of "chiefs'-there is chief COM
missary. chief sanitary officer. chief amuse-
nent provider. chief engineer. etc.-each
wearing numerous medals. Their qualifi-
cations are discussed. disclosing some ratf-
er remarkable recommendations for sery-
ice. The chief engineer got his medals for
cleaning the streets OF Washington-aby
praying for rain b.
The CHIEF commissary Got his for