Butler citizen. [volume] (Butler, Pa.) 1877-1922, 1906-06-28
That Ten Acre
Lot
By Donald Allen
Copyright. 1908. by X. A. Whitehead

Jed Wheeler, aged forty and bache
lor, was as well liked as any person
In the village of Flint He was neigh
borly, kind hearted and always willing
to do for others.
Jed's good qualities were in a way
his enemies. He was lazy, and, added
to his laziness, he had a mania for
trading. He would trade horses, dogs,
guns, watches, overcoat or anything
else, and it so happened that the other
fellow always got the best of the bar
gain.
He had been left quite a little for
tune by his grandmother, but In the
course of FIVE years he had sold Mt a
loss or traded with sharpers until all
that was left to him was ten acre lot
lying just outside the village limits
1t was as fine a meadow as could be
found in the county, and Jed was hang
ing ON to that until some lightning rod
man should come along and trade him
farm ON top the Rocky mountains
when he fell in love.
Jim Thomas, the carpenter, had died
three years before and left a level
headed, economical widow behind him.
She was an old schoolmate of Jed's,
and he had seen her almost every day
for twenty-five years, and until the
spirit of love bubbled up he had SIM
ply regarded her as he looked upon all
other women.
He was sitting on the grocery steps
one day whiting when his knife slip
ped and cut his finger. The Widow
Thomas was Just entering the store for
half dozen eggs when the accident
occurred, and she pulled out her hand
kerchief and bound up the bleeding
finger 1t was only trihe, but some
how 1t touched the heart Of the old
bachelor, and three days later he called
ON the widow.
Martha" he began, "Pve got tired
of sloshing around alone and am going
to get married"
"For the lands sakew she exclaimed.
''That is, IL the woman I want will
have me-"
"who is itf'
"You."
"Now, Jed, don't come around here
with any OF your nonsense" she said.
"You are good natured man, but you
are lazy. You think you've got brains,
| but everybody beats you. 1t would
| drive me crazy to have such a hus-
band.'
"I could and would reform. II had
any one to peck at me I'd go to work"
Il haven't time to be poking up a
husband. It's hard to teach old dogs
new tricks. Thank ye for the honor,
Jed, but / guess we won't do any mar
rying."
Jed was crushed for three days, dur
ing which time a windmill man came
along and offered to trade him 5000
acres of desert land In Arizona fos his
| meadow and explained that no could
| raise 10000 rattlesnakes to the acre ON
the sandy soil and sell the oil for 50 n
| gallon to grease the feet OF babies
| with.
If Jed had been In his normal condi-
ton he would have closed with the Of
fer at once, but as he was In the throes
| of hopeless love he astonished the
town by turning the windmill man
down. Two days later he went back
to the widow and said:
| Martha, / had dream about Jim
last night. I dreamed that l met him
| In front OF the blacksmith shop and
| that we shook hands and ho said he
| hoped I'd marry YOU"
"Oh, you've come about that have
| your she asked.
| II have. I'm a miserable man."
Have you tried catnip teaT
"Catnlp tear Great heavens! What
ails me Is love, and IL the Mississippi
| river was composed OF catnip tea IL
couldn't cure me. Martha, II you won't
| promise TO have me I can't live week
| longer"
"Nonsense. I'm busy with my iron
| ing, and you run along"
Jed was now so broken up that ev-
erybody began to notice and comment
on II, but when questioned he simply
shook his head and intimated that he
was not long for this sinful world. He
got up energy enough. however, TO
contract to get out thousand ties for
| q suburban electric line, and, hoping
this might work In his favor, he paid
another visit TO the widow and told
| her OF II.
"Now that you see I am going to
work, can't you say yes?" he asked In
conclusion.
"Jed, what do you come botherinB
forf" she asked.
because love you"
"Don't be silly. I'm making mlnce
pies today and haven't time to argue"
Jed went away. determined to throw
himself into the mill pond, but when he
reached tho bank he met stranger
who had been poking around the VII
lngc for couple Of days without tell
| ing any one his business. He intro
duced himself and said that he thought
some OF establishing an orphan asylum
if he could find site to suit In this
| way no brought the talk around TO
Jed's meadow. The value OF the land
M II lay was 500 an ncre. though JED
had never had u cash offer for II.
The stranger didn't exhibit too great
| interest In the matter. He said he'd
| think the matter over and perhaps
| mike an offer. He had no mountains
| IN Idaho and no lakes In Europe to
trade. but would be prepared to pay
cash. A day iator. while still saunter-
ing around. he met jed and said that
he could have $1,000 for the land as
soon us the deed was made out. The
Iovelorn bachelor had started for the
office OF tho village lawyer TO have the
deed made out when no met the Wild
| ow Thomas. She noticed his excite
ment and asked the cause, and when
he had told her she said:
Look here. Jed, don't you take too
much stock In the orphan business"
How do you mean"
you're an orphan yourself. and you
don't want 10 let any other orphan get
the better OF you. Can you get horse
and buggy anywhere for an hourT
| "Of course"
| Then let's drive out 70 your land
and seo what kind Of n place It would
mako for the poor orphans"
| On the way out jed rccurred to the
| old subject, saying that he was on his
way 10 drown himself when he met
| the stranger.
"Come, now," interrupted tho widow.
"ths IL straight business and you keep