Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1906-08-16
When the Editor
"Puffed"
By DONALD ALLEN
Copyright, 1905, by NJ. NJ. Cunningham


There was Just one reason why the
Widow Bidwell refused the maTlmo
NAL offer rendered her by Editor Flint
Df the Weekly Clarion and Fergus
County Advertiser. Editor Flint had
owned and edited the Clarion for many
years He had never married because
he had been too busy making up and
working off his edition OF 600 copies,
getting up ana printing auction bills,
writing thrilling local notices of wood
wanted on subscription and other mat
ters connected with n weekly Journal
of twenty years ago. Some Of his es-
teemed contemporaries sneerlngly re
marked now and then that he stole his
editorials but when ii came down to
writing out an auction bill they yielded
| him the palm.
Auction, Auction. Auction! read
the average bill. Take notice that on
the 14th OF September George Styles,
farmer, will sell at public yendue all
the live stock and other personal prop
erty on his farm on the Red Bridge
road. Said stock consists Of horses,
cows, sheep and hogs and about 100
hens and geese. Sale to begin at 10
a. m. and all will go to the highest
! bidder"
There was no doubt about the sue
cess Of the Clarion as a newspaper or
about the success of Editor Flint as an
editor When he finally made up his
mind to marry the Widow Bidwell,
there was no doubt that he would be
success as a Benedict. lie struck
snag however. The widow had been
obliged to turn to dressmaking since
her husbands death, and she did not
! rank with the -Four Hundred Of the
village, but she was lover OF poetry
and she had dreams of poets. While
! this kept her grocery bill down, it in
terfered considerably with her getting
out orders on time, and she calculated
that one about Offset the other
! The poetry loving widow had had
! fifty different poetic etfusions pub
| lished in the Clarion over the nom de
plume of Flossie but Mr.. Flint had
received the copy with Il grunt, and
| the public had recovered from the
shock each time within twenty -four
! hours.
The poems" had been published to
save carrying dead advertising Mrs.
BIdwell was rather surprised when
the editor dropped in on her one even
ing and proceeded to say that he want
ed her for the mistress of his house.
but she soon rallied and answered that
there was an insurmountable barrier
between them. He didn't look like a
poet She knew what lie could do in
the way Of an auction bill, but the
man who we'd Flossie must look the
part She would attend TO the poetry
as heretofore but he must at least
have long hair, an aesthetic face and
dreamy eyes.
The editor saw at once that he
couldn't ill the bill. lie wore his hair
short had fat face, and his eyes
were on the lookout for delinquent
subscribers instead Of looking into the
far away. He therefore picked up his
hat and walked back to the Office.
However the iron had entered Mr..
FllntS soul. He had laid his forty
year-old heart at woman's feet, and
she had spurned il. He either wanted
to commit suicide or secure revenge,
and after figuring up that the Clarion
plant was worth about $1,000 he decld-
ed to hang on to earth. The first In
stallment Of his revenge was shown In
his next issue, when he said:
I'VE take pleasure IN informing our
readers that a brother of the Widow
Bidwell. who writes beautiful verse
under the name Of Flossie, has just
died and left her a fortune estimated
at 100000 she has our heartiest con
gratulatiOns."
OF course the public read the item,
and Of course the widow read il. There
wasn't word Of truth in it. but when
people came and showcTed their con
gratulatiouS she couldn't bring her
self to deny the story. She was even
thankful to the Clarion for publishing
the canard The issue Of the follow
ing week pursued the matter further.
I'VE understand" it said. that the
fortune left To the Widow Bidwcll by
her deceased brother IN the west will
90 $5O.O 900 better than at first reported.
There are reports ahoat that she VIII
remove to New York city rs soon as
she comes into possession ana buy n
residence on Fifth avenue. Her poem
this week IS the best thing in the pa
per"
There were more congratulations,
and the widow got deeper into tho
tolls. 1t was so nice 10 be patted on
the back ana soft soaped that she
couldn't bring herself to deny the re-
ports.
Between the second and third issues
Of the Clarion the editor had a caller
His ostensiblc occupation was selling
Bohemian oats to farmers at s. n
bushel and sailing mighty close TO
prison as Il swindler, but he had the
hair and face and eyes Of a poet. Even
the fat and healthy editor had 10 ad-
NIT that The caller wanted 10 insert
a small ad ana ask about the Widow
Bidwell. lie had seen the notices in
the Clarion about her legacy. ana lie
wanted few pointers
Editor Flint praised the woman who
had jumped Oh his bleeding heart |
Aye, he spoke in highest terms Of her, !
and even told Mr.. Harold De Iisle how !
he could get an Introduction to her. |
Then the third issue said:
1--WE had 4 pleasant call the other |
day from Mr. Harold De Lisle. who |
has Just made n million dollars out Of |
Pennsylvania oil. We understand that |
he may remain In our village for some |
days Indeed, Dame Rumor IS con |
meeting his name with that Of rich |
and prominent widow on Chestnut |
street"
Mr.. De Lislc was duly introduced to
the Widow Bidwell. She had no sooner !
set eyes on him than her heart began /