davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Somerset reporter., 1906-07-05

Landlady- did you find your
bed? Lodger-Well l don't think that
the mattress Will ever need to be oper-
ated on for the removal OF superduous
hair.-New York Press
The Somerset reporter., 1906-07-05

Sorrow has not been given to US for
sorrows sake. but as lesson which
we are to learn somewhat, which once
learned 1t ceases to be sorrow.-Car.
The Somerset reporter., 1906-07-05

"snobson says he'd rather be alone
than in unpleasant company"
But the worst of his case IS, be can't
escape even Them.
The Somerset reporter., 1906-07-05

National Cigar Stands give the smoker just what
every man would get ii he aould-oo1olesas rates on
retail purchases.
Everybody knows how much he saves when he
is able to buy suit of clothes pair OF shoes, or
gun or anything else at the 7od0lgaz2'5 price. lie
saves the retailers profit; usually 20 to 30 per
cent
The Somerset reporter., 1906-07-05

The average man displays LOT of en-
thusiasm when he gets a chance to talk
about his troubles.
/ ness languor. heart palpitation Drastic ply
/ sizes grippe, sicken. weaken the bowels and don I
cure. Doan's Regulets act gently and cure con-
/ stipation. % cents. ASK your druggist.
A man is not justified in taking an eye
opener because ne is blindly 10 love.
/ Never can tell when you'll mash finger or
/ suffer cat bruise, burn or scad. BE prepared
/ DIT Thomas Electric Oil instantly relieves the
pain quickly cure The wound
/ Beauty is worse than liquor; it intox-
Gates both the holder and beholder.
Don't let the baby suffer from eczema sores or
any IT. hing of the skin Doan's Ointment gives
instant relief cures quickly. Perfectly safe for
children. All druggists sell 1t.
No, the starboard of a steamer is not
reserved for star boarders.
"Had dyspepsia or indigestion for years. No
ppetite, and what did eat distressed me ter
| bly,. Burdock Blood Bitters cured me. u. II.
Walker, unbury, Ohio.
Marriage is never failure, but often
the contracting parties are.
lPor over Sixty Ysars
MRS wtNsLow's SOOTHING SYRUP has been
used for over so years by millions OF mothers
| for their children while teething, with perfect
success. 1t soothes the child ,softeus the gums
alays all pain cures wind collie, and is the
! best remedy for Disrrhoea. 1t will relieve the
poor little sufferer Immediately, SOLD by
| Druggists In every part ofthe world. Twenty
! ave cents 3 bottle. BE sure and ask for - Mrs.
/ Winslow's Soothing syrup" and take no other
kind.
Fortune telling is always fortunate for
the fortune teller.
The Somerset reporter., 1906-07-05
Notice.

The party who took a road scraper
from the Congregational Church lot last
fall is requested to return the same to
3N25 SKowHEGAN ELECTRIC LIGHr CO
The Somerset reporter., 1906-07-05

The average man displays a 10, of en-
thusiasm when he gets chance to talk
about his troubles.
The Somerset reporter., 1906-07-05

With 1000 established retail stores to provide CT
oars for, this concern becomes power in the tobac-
co market big enough to own its own brands. con-
troll its own factories and be its own producer!
Each Of the 1000 stores is thereby virtually part
The Somerset reporter., 1906-07-05
MONEY! MAKING FARMS !. i.

our Catalogue OF Real Estate Bargains. Good
farms st ali prices from $500 to $1,000. (. A.
MRRRIMAN. Resl Estate Agent, Madison, Ne.
1871
The Somerset reporter., 1906-07-05

ner in tremendous cigar producing business. Each
gets its goods direct and at A51 r25t-Payins no job
bing profits no fancy dividend., 10 expenses of
travelling statesmen. 1t car an does retail at the
usual 7ylelc5a1e price-or even ies..
The Somerset reporter., 1906-07-05
BiliOuSneSS and
Sick Headache

quickly cured by
0RINO Laxative Fruit Syrup
as it SWeetens and tones I'D
the stomach and acts as a
gentle Stimulant on the liver
and bowels. It will positive
ly cure chronic constipation.
ORlNO clears the complex.
ion Of pimpIes and bIotches.
Refuse substitutes. Price 800.
F. w. BucKNAM, Druggist.
The Somerset reporter., 1906-07-05

Constipation causes headache, nausea, dzzi
ness, languor. heart palpitation Drastic ply
sizes grippe sicken. weak EN- the bowels and don
cure. Doans Regulets act gently and cure CON
stipation % cents ASK your druggist
The Somerset reporter., 1906-07-05

w BOOK MAILED FREE.
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1906-02-24
Odd BIunders.

Many stories are told Of the absent
mindcdness Of the late Sir John Bur
don Sanderson. formerly regius profes-
sor of medicine nj oxford Lady San
derson left him one evening TO conduct
his guests into the dining room. When
few minutes later. she came down in
10 the hall she found that her husband
had forgotten himself again He was
helping his guests into their overcoats,
shaking hands and saying good night.
John Redmond in a recent speech Mt
Belfast. ireland. announced that par
Lament next session will be no place
for Irish members who cannot attend. :"
And he looked surprised when the re-
mark was greeted with loud laughter.
\ correspondent of a weekly journal
makes n curious bull OF certain plan
he writes: 1T sounded well. but the
seed of suspicion ras planted in my
minds eye and forced ii on with sur
mise"
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1906-02-24
III. Diplomatic Clerk.

Henry, you haven't a room left
have yout" inquired New York drum
mcr of his friend of many years stand
ing OH The other side of the counter of
the Chicago hotel.
Not one. replied Henry, but III
look over the rack again and see II
can't lind you a place somewhere.
An right" said the New Yorker
while his friend gave the slips his anx
iouS attention. Light broke over his
face In "A moment. and he ctme back.
"a man up on tie parlor floor gave
up his room about an hour ago. but he
didn't expect to leave it quite 50 soon.
Ill send up and see If can't hurry
him Il little
The portrr's bell was rung. whis-
pered coilouuy took place between Hen
~ and thut blue shirted functionary,
and In hftcen minutes the man from
New Yotk WAS rejoicing in one Of the
best rooms IN the house
But the clerk omitted 10 inform him
that the previous occupant had given
up his room AT the precise moment
when he had given up his life.
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1906-02-24

The term entire So often seen over
inns and tavcrns in England and not
always understood by the passersby,
is said TO have first been used about
IT,. Prior TO that date the mnlt liz
uors in general use were ale, beer and
"twopcnny" 1t was usual for tavern
customers TO call for pint or tankard
OF half and half that Is. half ale and
half beer. half ale and half twopenny
or half beer and half twopenny. In
course of time IL became customary 10
call for tankHrd OF three threads"
meaning third OF ale. beer and two
penny. TO save publicans the trouble
and waste of turning three taps for
one pint of liquor II brewer named Har-
wood conceived the idea Of making n
beverage which should unite the fla
vors Of all three drinks. He called his
production entire, or entire butt
beer" As II was considered suitable
for porters and other working people,
Il Is said TO have obtained the further
name Of porter London News.
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1906-02-24
conLIinG and Thurman.

Senator Roscoe Conkling was once
addressing the senate In an impassiOn-
I'd manner and seemed 10 direct his re-
marks 10 senator Thurman. At length
the latter got irritated.
Does the senator from New York"
he rOared. expect me 10 answer him
every time he turns TO me-
For moment Mr.. Conkllng hcsitat-
ed. and everybody expected terrific
explosion Then. with nm air Of ex-
quisite courtesy, he replied;
when | speak OF the law ! turn to
the senator from Ohio as the Mussul-
man turns toSard Mecca ! turn TO
HIM as do 20 the English common
law rs the worlds most ropious f0un
tain Of human Jurisprudence.
The usually decorous senate broke
into storm OF applause. and the Thur
man eye moistened Il little. The two
statesmen were the best Of friends
and greatly enjoyed each others socie
" when "off duty"
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1906-02-24

Abdul Hamid. the sultan Of Turkey,
always expresses the greatest aston
Ishmcnt when told that reforms have
not been Carried ont and declares that
ii is the fault of his ministers and 9th
er subordinatcs who have neglected 10
obey his orders He then promises
that there will be no further delay and
expresses profound sorrow and morti-
iication that any one shoull suspect
him of insincerity. Nothing happens.
The ambassadors 20 again and again 10
the sublime porte and are told that
their wishes will he Immediately com
piled with They know that they are
simply being played with and that the
promises Of the sultan are intended to
delay action and To avoid II If possible
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1906-02-24

The glyccrlne employed In DIR. Pierce's
medicines greatly enhances the medi-
cinal properties which IL extracts and
holds IN solution much better than alco-
hol would. II also possesses medicinal
properties OF its own. being valuable
dcmulcent. nutritive antiScptic and anti
ierment. II adds greatly to the efficacy
Of the Black Cherry bark. Golden seal
root. Stone root and Queens root. CON
tanned in Golden Medical Discovery In
subduing chronic. or lingering coughs
bronchial. throat and lung affections,
for all OF which these agents are recon-
mended by standard medical authorities
In all cases where there Is "A wasting
away Of flesh loss OF appetite. with
weak stomach. as in the early stages OF
consumption. there can bc no doubt that
glvccrinc acts as valuable nutritiVe and
aids the Golden Seal root. Stone root,
Queens root and Black Cherry bark in
promoting digestion and building up the
flesh and strength. controlling the cough
and bringing about Il healthy condition
III the whole system. OF course. IL must
not be- expected 10 work miracles. 1t Will
not cure consumption except in its earlier
stages. II will cure very severe. obstin-
ate. chronic coughs, bronchial and laryn-
gcal troubles. ard chronic sore throat
with hoarscneSs In acute coughs IL Is
not so effective. IL is In the lingering
coughs or those VI long standing, even
when accompanied by bleeding from
lungs, that il has performed It's most
marvellous cures. Send for and read the
little book of extracts. treating Of the
properties and uses ~ the several med.
icimal roots that enter into DIR. picrcc's
Golden Medical Discovery and learn ,ChU
this medicine has such wide range Of
application In the cure ~ diseases, II Is
sent free. Address Dr T. V. Pierce.
buffalo y. y The Discovery" con
tans no alcohol or harmful. habit-furm-
ing drug Ingredients all printed on each
bottle wrapper in plain English.
Sick people. especially those suffering
from diseases Of long standing are invited
a. consult DR. Pierce by letter. free. All
correspondence is held a. strictly private
and sacrcdly confidential, Address DR..
H. V. Pierce Buffalo. y. y.
Dr. Picrce'S Medical Adviser is sent free
on receipt Of stamps To pay expense VI
mailing OnlU Send q one-ccnt stamps
for paper covered, or 81 stamps for cloth
bound copy.
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1906-02-24

'eglment ont without decay. nor could
ne tell how long his absence might be.
with barely time to ding few neces-
sarieS into his kit bag AMI scratch u
hasty note to Miss " barton he was Off.
Three weeks later. returning. tired.
brOnZcd and eager. the first thing TO
meet his eyes was the note still lying
where the forg"tful boy had left It,
And Miss Wharton and her mother
We're gone. Ten days ago they had
left. he WAS told There was no clew
by which To follow them. no one knew
whittier they had departed.
Anstruthcr. tortuling himself with
vain imaglningS as 10 what She must
gaVc thought OF him. nearly went mad.
lie could hardly sleep. The man grew
nervous. irritable. until even the colo
mel noticed il and recommended trip
home ~ Il consequence Anstruther
now stood in Lady Chey draw
ing room and. Indifferent TO what be
came of him. waited To ask llonOrla
Dcrwcntwatcr 10 be his wife. After
all lie had always known Honoria.
| Probably they would get on rs well as
most married couples. And the dad
would ~ pleased.
There was II sudden ripple of talk at
his side Here is the next What.
you have not met her yet: My dear,
She is the beauty this season. Just
wait and you Will See
Anstruther listened with his tolerant
smile He must try to reach llonoria.
But Us he stirred all nj once the lights
were lowered. and he. perforce. halted.
Well he could wait until the tableau
was over. \ faint curiosity. too. was
! awakened by what lac caught from his
ncighhors Who was this new beauty
And then he started violently. From
the piano came few bars of prelude
oddly familiar. The curtain rose, and
the picture stood revealed. In the
quick murinur of applause AnStruther' )
sharp exclamation escaped unnoticed.
There lnfolded in long. cinging dra
perics. her lovely hair unbound. one
arm thrown ucGliGcntly up behind the
small head. rested his lady. II huge sill
yer crescent seeming 10 bear her
through limliles- space Her face was
lifted Her eyes gazed wistfully into
the distance.
Lady Moon. Lady Moon. where are
YOU rovingt" sang the famous soprano,
| but AnStruihcr hardly heard. His
breath was coming with difficulty; his
heart was pounding - she had not
forgotten. Lady Moon, oh. Lady Moon
A. the curtain dropped he turned 10
the man next him. whom luckily he
Glanced To have met.
1t IL IS Miss Wharton. is II notT''
lie asked aud as the other nodded IL
quick gratitude wcllcd NJ within him.
Thank heaven. he was not too late
Won't YOU take me back" he de
nHndcd 1T Is all right" in answer TO
look of surprise We've ARE old
friends. used TO know her IN India.
and and there IS something ought to
tell her"
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1906-02-24
CEMETERY NOTICE

Any one desiring tnpurchassa Monument or
Tombs Of any Kind, either Marble ar Granite
or fencing 81 any kind Will hc pleased Ia have
you write us or call on our local agents, and
will call to see you with first chiss designs Of
some uf the incest, noatncst and cheapest
work done on this peninsula. All maicrai aud
work guaranteed 10 every respect We have
hecn doing business fur twelve years. No
strangers write us for trial.
our local agents are: Il. J. McAllcn * Bro.
Snow hin. w.O Payne. stockton. } + Wise,
Jr Berlin.
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1906-02-24

Hamilton Wright Mabic in an ad.
dress TO the students Of business col.
lege said: III were young man or n
young woman going out into the world
today should not dare TO go unless |
had given myself every possible cduca-
tional opportunity unless had made
myself absolutely master Of the thing |
wanted 10 do. tell you today that the
tragedy Of modern life Is the tragedy
Of the half educated man or woman. II
Is the tragedy Of the man or woman
who wants 10 do something and cannot
do ANYTHING we'll"
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1906-02-24
We will
beIP you.

If You are living in rented house.
you. no doubt. have long desired to own
your own home aud have made plans 10
that end. There is no need to delay the
matter, when the Snow Hill Building
and Loan Association is ready to help
YOU, and when YOU realize that the
money you have been paying out every
year for rent would have bought and
paid for a home for you. then you will
no longer continue To pay rent.
Call and see W. d. Cor,lry, Jr. Sec
rotary of the Association aud he will
explain how you can get the money to
build you a house an and easy way by
which you can repay the loan.
Snow Hill Building and Loan
Association.
MARION T. HARGIS.
President
w d. CORDDRY. .Ir.
Secretary.
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1906-02-24
FOR STOVES
hACk y FOR HEATERS

For all kinds Of Hardware, Tinware, Cutlery,
and, in fact, for everything to be found i'll a
frst-cass hardware store, come to Hack. He
wants to please his customers and give them
tie money, we can suit YOU Z If you want the
best farm fence made come to this store. If
you want sausage mills, or hog killing supplies
of any kind, we have them here.
The Evening statesman. [volume] (Walla Walla, Wash.) 1903-1910, 1906-01-30
PLAN FOR A HAY MEMORIAL LIBRARY
BROWN UNIVERSITY WILL RAISE
LARGE FUND FOR THAT
PURPOSE.

PROVIDENCE, r. l., Jan. 30.-The
Rev Dr. w. H. P Faunce, president of
Brown university, is preparing TO issue
a call to the Alumni of Brown univer-
sity, asking them to contribute to a
fund of $150000 for new $500 900 Ii
brary building for the university Mr.
Andrew Carnegie has promised $780,
600 for that purpose provided the
alumni of the university raise a SINH
lar amount In accordance with a
suggestion made by Mr.. Carnegie, the
library will be named the John Hay
Memorial library. The late secretary
o. state was a member Of the class of
SIS and this will be the first memorial
erected to his memory. Work on the
building will be begun as soon as the
entire sum of 100000 mas been col
lected. The present library of Brown
university is entirely inadequate. At
the present time there are twenty
thousand volumes in the basement of
the building, growing green with
mould, because there is no room to
shelf them properly. Other books are
The Evening statesman. [volume] (Walla Walla, Wash.) 1903-1910, 1906-01-30
Visit Of Cook County Marching CIut

Visit of Cook County Marching Club
NASHVILLE, Tenn, Jan. 30.-The
Cook County Marching club, one hum
dred and eight men strong, and it's fa-
nous band of forty pieces, arrived here
this morning on it's return from Cuba
to Chicago and was received by the
local democratic organizations with
great enthusiasm. The Cook County
Marching club is composed of members
of the Cook county democracy and was
organized in 1892 This is the fifth
southern tour of the club. The Cook
county democracy is an organization
composed of two thousand democrats
of Cook county, ILL.,, and has for many
years taken active part in all political
battles of the democracy not only in
Chicago, but also in other cities in
various parts of the country.
The Marching club will spend the
whole day in the city and will be the
guest of the local democratic clubs
and organizations. The program for
the day includes a parade of the club
through the principal streets of the
city, concert by the clubs band, an
automobile ride and a banquet. The
The Evening statesman. [volume] (Walla Walla, Wash.) 1903-1910, 1906-01-30
Hearing on the Stephens Bill.

WASHINGTON, D. c., Jan. 30.-Tne
house committee on interstate and for
eign commerce began the hearing of
arguments for and against the Stephens
bill today, which is for the extension
of from twenty eight to forty hours
as to the time cattle may be allowed
to remain in cars. Representatives of
peared before the committee in oppo-
sition to the bill, while a number OF
representatives of the western cat
tie trade strongly favored the adoption
of the Till.
The Evening statesman. [volume] (Walla Walla, Wash.) 1903-1910, 1906-01-30
HONOR MEMORY Of KING CHARLES
IMPOSING RELIGIOUS SERVICES
WERE HELD IN CHURCH
OF LONDON TODAY.

LONDON, Jan. 3O.-Two hundred
and fifty-seven years ago today King
Charles l., was executed and, as GUS
tomary the various legitimist and
Jacobite leagues and orders celebrated
the anniversary by holding memorial
meetings and depositing flowers at the
foot of the statue of Charles l., on
Trafalgar square. A largely attended
service was held in the morning in ST
Margaret Pattens, Rood Lane. The
officiating clergy was attired in red
vestments, this being symbolical of
the blood of the martyr. The service
and responses were in English instead
of Latin
AS has been the custom for several
years ever since some too ardent adj
mirer of the martyr king had placed
wreath with an inscription, containing
seditious sentiments. at the foot of
the statue, the wreaths and other floral
gifts were first submitted for APPROX
al to the commissioner of woods and
forests. AS in former years there was
a wreath from Edinburgh, bearing the
inscriptions: Sacred to the memory of
King Charles the First, beheaded by
his rebellious subjects at Whitehall
January 30, 1649." Among the wreaths
and other floral gifts sent in comment
Grafton of the day were such from the
Royal Oak club, Edinburgh; the For.
get-me-not club. the Legitimist Order
OF ST. German, the Order of the White
Rose; the Thames Valley Legitimist
club; the White Cockade Legitimist
club, Holywell, Huntingdonshire, and
other societies.
The Evening statesman. [volume] (Walla Walla, Wash.) 1903-1910, 1906-01-30

present to call it 1.-The Battle of the
Plains" or THE Old Oregon Trail"
AS to the disposition of the funds
collected for the monuments Mr..
Meeker mas this to say:
Committees to Handle Funds.
TT is not good policy to count ones
chickens before they're Matched, but
in hope that there will be chickens
(cash), arrangements have been made
whereby all moneys collected will be
turned over to a committee of three in
each state to disburse according to it's
best judgment and the amount Sc
cured" The committee in this state
consists of Edward S. Meany, profess
sor of history in the University of
Washington; Edwin Eells, secretary
OF the State Historical society, and
Hon. Allen Weir, former secretary of
state and an old pioneer.
Mr.. Meeker starts thus early in the
season to enable MIN to cross the Blue
mountains on the hard snow. Should
no misfortune befall, nor ill-luck at
tend the little party, Indianapolis will
be reached before the first snow flies
next winter" as Mr.. Meeker puts it.
The Evening statesman. [volume] (Walla Walla, Wash.) 1903-1910, 1906-01-30
The
Farmers SAVINGS
Bank
Organized in 1889.
Assets $563,5SO.I9.
Organized in 1889.

The principles adopted at the time
of organization were:
Commercial aggressiveness. moder-
ated by safety and security
1.-The officers of the Bank shall not
borrow from the Bank, nor use any Of
it's funds for speculative purposes
With every facility for the transac-
ton of a banking business in all its
branches. The Farmers Savings Bank
is prepared to handle the accounts of
all those who appreciate Care,
Courtesy and Conservatism.
Our Trustees Are:
Levi Ankeny; Geo. Struthers
G. w. Babcock; S F. Henderson;
Frances Dooley; A. H. Reynolds;
G. A. Evans; G. H. Smell;
w. P Winans.
Our Officers Are:
w P. Winans, President
G. w. Babcock, Vice-Presldent
]. Chitwood, Cashier
A. A. King, Assistant Cashier
The Farmers Saving Bank.
Cor. Main & Second SITS.
Rees- Winans Bldg.