The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1906-11-04

] And Cf his act Is proud.
/ In car house not tenant
Who has children is allowed.
The first floor has a parrot
That is screaming all day long;
/ The top floor canary
That half splits ones ears with song
On the second floor a daehs1und
Makes things lively with its bark;
The third -four pianola
Goes from noon Till after dark
One tenant plays the banjo.
/ And another the c3ruct:
On the ground floor lives the tenor
| OF double male quartette
OF course che knows the reason
Why they bar cut girls and bQysi
It's that children are a nuisance,
For they always make a noise.
"Tve had al sorts Of curious cases
said a young physician, l met yesterday
but my last call was something new to
me was sent for by Mr.. Blank at
one of the hotels to paint a black eye. It
I wasn't his eye. It was his Wife's. and
never saw a worse one. The Blanks were
married day before yesterday. in a Penn
sylvania town. and as they left the
( brides house TO drive 10 the railway sta
/ tion somebody threw an old shoe after
them. The bride happened 70 be looking
out the carriage window. and the heel Of
/ the shoe struck her in the left eye I
found her with one eye swollen shut. and
/ the other looking almost as bad from cry
/ ing. She had expected &c dine with friends
/ here tonight but the thing is out Of the
question. ] never painted "a black eye be-
/ fore. and the best / could do was 70 fix
/ hers up 50 it doesn't show very much
through a thick veil She'll have 10 stay
( indoors for several days and you can
imagine how she feels. She told me she
hadn't known her husband could swear
/ but the things he said about the man who
threw the shoe were q great comfort TO
/ her Last spring I had 10 treat a bride
\ groom fer ear trouble, caused by grains
I of rice thrown at him. but this was my
first honeymoon black eye It's positive
! ~ dangerous to marry in towns where
/ friends are so enthusiastic
Speaking Of marriage. reminds me Of
some wedding announcement cards I saw
/ the other day. A young Washington
+ lawyer took as his bride Hartford girl
who is an orphan. She has lived for years
with her sister, who is a physician. but
when the announcement cards were under
| consideration. her brother, as head Of her
/ family, decided that he ought to send
/ them out. His wife thought so too. M.
and Mrs. John links announce the mar
riage Of their sister. etc" he thought
! the cards ought to read. The physician
sister wouldn't agree 10 this. DIR. Jane
sisted on. There was so squabble about
/ IL. for they are a very united and peace
I ful family. but they are also firm in their
I opinions. Mr.. and Mrs John sent out
cards with their names on them, and DIT.
/ Jane sent out cards bearing her name. A
/ few Of their friends received both kinds
/ of cards. and that was because neither
Mr.. and Mrs. John nor Dr. Jane would
l consent 10 a division of the list. Il was
a matter of principle with Mr.. and Mrs.
John. and equally a matter Of principle
with DIT. Jane, and between them, with
/ the best feeling in the world the we'd
/ ding was most thoroughly announced
MY Aunt Maria is to blame for it,
said the girl in the Empire coat. Moth
/ ing can convince her that Washington
/ isn't overrun with lady killers. Every
time I go out she warns me against them.
! They're just hanging around she says,
waiting for a chance 10 scrape an ac-
/ quaintance with any girl who does so
much as glance at them. Her remarks
were on my mind when I went 70 the mat
inee alone last week but the play was
almost over before became convinced
that the man behind ne was really try
turn my head 10 see. but knew it. When
the play was over. he very nearly spoke
20 ne, and J grabbed my coat and hur-
ried out He was at my heels. Pardon
me-. he said. as we reached the door /
dashed on. without looking at him. Out
! went. he following. Three separate and
distinct times he spoke. Finally, he made
a sprint and caught up with me. You
/ he began. Sir. ] said. expecting TO with
/ er him where he stood. He held out his
hand. You dropped this, he said. I
tried 10 tell you sooner
I very nearly went through the side
walk with sheer modification, but I jerk
ed myself out and said / was deaf. All
/ he'd been trying to do was to return a
bunch of artificial curls I'd dropped"
The young man was possibly twenty
one, but he had the air of feeling a great
deal older than that The lady by her
own confession was thiry-five bur even
in the sunlight she didn't look H. She
picked up a dime in change from the drug
store counter and glanced at the date on
It.
That's the year was born in" she
said
The young man looked at the coin. He
was going to say something hattering and
man-of- the-worldy, or know the reason
why
"Thirty-fver" he said. ineredulousIy
/ Why, you don't seem that old. l sup
pose its because you're stu so active.
I'm not saying that the Orientals
ought not to be discouraged says a wo-
man. who has just returned from a year
in California. Il don't doubt that all sorts
iaboring man with the American vote and
the European name isn't allowed to put
both feet down on the yellow Peril. but
really should like to know how Cali
fornia women would get on without ORR
entail help. I've been told how the Chinese
will work for almost nothing at picking
/ fruit or building railroads. but they won't
/ cook for nothing. l paid my Chinese cook
SS5 a month, and I will say he was worth
it, After he left me l had an Irish wo-
men at s. q week, and she wasn't worth
: cents a year. / was never so happy in
my life as I was while l had that Chi
nese cook I wish We had Yellow Perils
/ lust like him here in Washington. You