davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05
THE .NE'ER DO WELL

He was gentle and kind: he would plan
half the day
For an unlooked-for act that would please
you some way:
He would sit up all night with n friend
who was Ill,
And to do you a favor would work with
will
But he never amounted to much.
There was something about him that got
to your heart:
It was plain that he never was playing n
part,
But that all that he did he was doing for
you
And that he was n friend who wus lasting
and true
But he never amounted 10 much.
All the boys he grew up with went rising
to fame;
Tb ere were some who made money. and
all made n name;
Art and music and letters. the law or
finance,
EySry one OF the rest made the mos: Of
lis chance
LCt he never amounted TO much.
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05
Right to the Letter.

A New Yorker was once referring to
the stolidity and literal mindedness
OF the British shopkeeper, when he
was reminded of an amusing expert
ence of friend in London. The Am
erican had been making several pur-
chases in a jewelry establishment
among others silver set, and finding
that he had with him insufficient funds
to defray the entire cost, he desired
the clerk to send the set to his hotel,
marked &c. o. d.
Due note was made by the clerk;
but when the articles arrived at the
hotel the purchaser was surprised to
find that no charges had been col
lected. Opening the package the Am
erican was dumbfounded to discover
that each piece of silver had been care.
fully engraved, in a beautiful mono
gram, &C. o. D.'-Success Magazine.
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05
Where Life is Held Cheap.

A New York contractor of promi-
nence, according to Josiah Strong, re-
Gently told him that the killing of
working men was cheaper than pro-
tecting them. The statement created
a stir when made by DR.. Strong, who
is president of the American Institute
OF Social Service, at the municipal art
dinner.
Nine men are killed every day in
New York." he continued, "in acci-
dents which are for the most part
avoidable. Our city is becoming a ver-
liable human shambles."
Coal mines and railroads, he said,
were slaughter houses for the laboring
men. Last year there We're $500 acci-
dents to laboring men that the public
knew nothing about.
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05
Fed by Stomach Tube.

For ten years before his death at
Kingston. in England, the other day a
man named Joseph Knight had not
eaten any food. Eleven years ago,
while on board the yacht Eliba at Cos
port, he accidentally drank some deter
gent in mistake for porter, with the re-
suit that his gullet and other internal
organs were destroyed. He was placed
in the hands of an able surgeon, who
not only saved his life, but also en-
abled him to live for more than ten
years in comparative comfort by
means of feeding through tube in the
side, leading directly to his stomach.
1t is remarkable that though unable
to eat he could always enjoy a smoke.
He was about forty years of age.
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05
Peruna Is Exempt.

The internal revenue commissions
er has decided that Pe-ru-na as now
manufactured is exempt from internal
revenue license.
The highest medical and pharma-
ceutical authorities in the United
States have passed upon the product.
1t must be highly gratifying to the
many friends of Pe-ru-na and the local
commercial world that the product
which has carried Columbus name
into all continents, again enjoys the
same fixed status as any other recog-
nized medicine.-Columbus Dispatch.
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05

Clerk-Do you expect me to fit a
number two shoe on a number five
foot? Proprietor-No, but you should
know enough to put the two on a shoe
that will fit.
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05

Columbus has just landed. ANY
thing we can do for you, sir?" inquired
the natives. Yes. Kindly direct me
to the nearest place where | can secure
souvenir postal cards"
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05

If you could have your choice, what
kind of death would you select"
We'll. l think I'd prefer to be petted
to death by pretty woman"
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05
A Spring Suggestioni

Take Garfield Tea in the morning or be
fore retiring; its use insures pure blood and
natural action of the liver, kidneys,
stomach and bowels. 1t has beneficial
effect on the entire system. 1t is made
of Herbs.
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05

A Los Angeles woman is charged
with swindling Texas people out of
$4,000 on silk worm proposition.
And now the worm has turned and had
her arrested.
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05

Il am told that you broke your en-
gagement with Sarah because she got
too fat. Is not that small business?'
No; l didn't want to be found guilty
of bigamy"
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05

Didn't you see some beautiful seen
cry when you made the ascent of
Pixies Peak?" Yes, the scenery was
all right, but l didn't like the climb it."
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05
Worth Knowing

that Allcock's are the original and only
genuine porous plasters; all other so-called
porous plasters are limitations.
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05
Important to Mothers.

You may not see an airship sail next
summer, but you'll see many house
fly.
Lewis Single Binder straight Sc. You
pay lOc for cigars not so good. Your dealer
or Lewis Factory. Peoria, Ill.
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05

Lewis Single Binder costs more than
other DC cigars. Smokers know why
Your dealer or Lewis Factory, Peoria. iii
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05

Did you tell the captain that you
considered me fool?" mo, l didn't
tell him what l thought
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05
I SEAL

'@-
Hairs Catarrh Cure Is taken internally and acts
directly on the blood and mucous surfaces of the
system. send for testimonials. free.
+. j. CHENEY a CO., Toledo, O..
Sold by all Druggists, s5c.
Take Halls Family Pills for constipation.
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05
STATE OF ONO, CITY OF TOLEDO, a.

I.
FRANK j CHENEY makes oath that he is senior
partner of the firm of +. j. CHENEY Co., doing
business in the City of Toledo, County and State
aforesaid. and that said firm will pay the sum of
ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS for each and every
case of CATARRg that cannot be cured by the of
HALLS CArARRH CURE.
FRANK J. CHENEY.
Sworn to before me and subscribed In my pres
ence, this 9th day of December, A. ID. 1856.
-, A. W. GLEASON,
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05
Asthma Cured

Speedy relief and permanent cure Of Asth-
asthma Cure. Money positively refunded II
ees ss2ss1,eiAL, s,i, For oinfosmation call Sr Ad'
Denver. Colo. Refersnces given.
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05

Mrs. Windows Soothing Syrup.
For children teething softenh the gums, reduces
nammaton, allays PAIN W md collie 25c bottle.
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05

Colorado House Tent
COLORADO TENT AND AWNING co.
Largest canvas goods house In the
West Write for illustrated catalog.
Robt, 3. Gutshall. Pres. 1921 Lawrence
g.. Denver. Colo.
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05
1H6us the j. \. WILSON STOCK SAOOIES
Oxford Hotel

Denver One block from Union Depot
Fireproof. c. H. MORSE Mg-
Gilpin observer., 1906-04-05
AMERICAN WOMEN FIND RELIEF

How many women realize THAI
1T is not the plan of nature that women
should suffer so severely.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1906-05-11

turn upon her and the aged lady was so
badly gored and injured that she died
on Saturday evening the day after the
injuries were received.
Announcement was made at party
given to her young lady friends by Miss
Mary Trenbeath of Neche, that the
charming hostess was engaged to be
married to Prot. Frank A. Heilman, a
member OF the Southern MINI. Normal
Col ege at Austin, MINI. the happy event
to occur in June.
The new asylum building at Bathgate
is under construction. Surveyor Mott
has laid out the grounds for the founda-
ton, and Dinnie Bros. of Grand Forks
have the con ract at a little less than
s25, 600. 1t will be fine building, the
center unit is 4Ox50 three stories and two
wings each 40x5O two stories high.
The building and occupation of this
institution will mean much for the pros
periy of Bathgate and we congratulate
our neighbor city on its commencement
and h pc for its early completion and
organization as school,
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1906-05-11

Those individuals who are filling up
regularly on North Dakota whiskey. OF
rather the kind of whiskey sold in North
Dakota, are to be pitied. Commission
er Ladd says that ITO samples of whis-
key sold in this state and analyzed BY
him, but five contained any considerable
amount of whiskey. Most of them were
connections ofvile substitutes for whis.
key, and many large quantities of wood
alcohol, Il rank poison. One sample an
alysed contained teu per cent of wood
alcohol. The "squirel" brand OF
"booze" sold over the bars of "Dlind
pigs" or peddled by "boot-leggers" is
unfit to be taken into the human stomach
and the sooner this is realized by hun.,-
reds of poor human wrecks the sooner
they will regain their physical health and
mental and moral balance.-St. Thomas
Times.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1906-05-11

Stuart Thompson, who has had man.
agement of the News at Hallock for sew.
eral years has severed his connection
with that paper and, it is said, intends to
move to Washington. The News has
been an aggressive and wide-awake pub.
lication in the past which, in great de.
gree, is due to his energy. We under.
stand that Percy Kemp succeeds as local
editor. Both these gentlemen learned
the printing trade in this Office, and like
a half dozen others whom we could men.
ton who started their career in Pioneer
Express of7ice.are either publishing news
papers Of their own or are identified with
the trade in positions of responsibility.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1906-05-11
A "FRENz1ED" OPPORTUNITY.

Ofcourse, everybody has heard of tn,
''Looting of Alaska and how Alex
Mckenzie attempted to steal the create
part OF that far-off and ice.bound lane
and failed mostly because the Califarni
crowd got decision in their own cour
that Mckenzie was in contempt OF tn,
order of that court and was therefor,
made to leave Alaska and live in Cali
fornia tor year, until the Californi;
crowd got possession of the mines tha
were in litigation.
But all this is far-off. The details are
somewhat mixed, except as told by the
California people, whose evidence j.
naturally rather one.sided. But if thi.
Mckenzie is such '.looter" something
of the kind should have cropped out ir
the history of North Dakota, where he
has been so prominent a. leader for SC
many years. Notoriously, new states
have usually been fruitful fields fol
''looters."
But as yet no bright newspaper re-
porter has seen this grand money-makine
opportunity for series of "frenzied''
articles in "Anybody's Magazine" o.
course, there might be some slight diff
ficulties in the way. 1t might involve
Others who now appear before the pub.
lie as shining lights Of reform. To gel
the necessary evidence some of the very
insurgents" might find it. compulsory
to take an immunity bath" and turn
states evidence; but a good "frenzied'
reporter, with well filled kettle of lye
and whitewash, ought to be able to fix
that part all right.
1t is true that the general public al
ready have heard Of some political loot
ing. There was the looting Of the con.
gressional aspirations Of one NJ. N.
Johnson. then there was the disolootion
Of prominent editors fond dream oi
the governorship, another gentleman
who was drawing salaries for two OF
three state Offices at one time was
gently disolooted from all Of them, and
again . Mr.. Spalding twice suffered the
pangs Of disolootion as representative
Of the machine" IN congress. There
were also others many Others enough
10 make alot Of serial matter. and L d
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1906-05-11

well Tor many thousand years without
the telephone and at the present time, a
large part of its use may be deemed but
a "luxury"-but even in this light it is
luxury that few would do without after
once having been used to it. 1t is one
OF those things that science is continually
bringing to us from the unknown, ut
when once known becomes necessities.
On the other hand the utilities of the
phone are too we'll known to need dis
cription. Just a simple incident. A..
farmer who lives not many miles from
here IN Manitoba. called up physician
in near by town, in hurry up case of
illness, but the doctor was out of town
But the farmer OH inquiry found that the
doctor was out some distance III the
country some miles beyond his own
residence. Then he telephoned a
neighbor who lived on the road the doc.
tor was to take home and the neighbor
intercepted the doctor and sent him to
the farmer in less time than it would
have taken the doctor to get there from
town.
Much Of what we have written about
the telephone is comparatively an cd
story, but it is written because of the
present movement for the establishment
of rural lines. The farmer may think
OF the phone as luxury only, but he
will find it paying proposition and a
luxury besides.-And further, though he
may put it off for season ne will have it
in time and he might as we'll have it and
the use of it now.
To the farmers wife the telephone
is real boon. Necessarily she
lives somewhat isolated life
because of her distance from her neigh
bors, but with tho telephone, she can
call on her neighbor without leaving
the home and its cares and also save
the long walk. Ifthe farmer thinks he
can get along without the phone, he
should not forget his wife is woman,
and that women love association, and
spend many lonesome hours that the
man never thinks OF.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1906-05-11
OFFICIAL DIRECTORY.
q. 8, Representatives, Thos. F. Marshall.
A. GrOnna.

q. 8. Representatives, Thos. F. Marshall.
A.. j. GrOnnA.
Senators, Il. @. .Hanrbrough,P p. McCumber
Governor, E. Y. Sarles.
Lieut.. Governor, David Bartlett.
Secretary of State, Z. +. Porter.
State Treasurer, A. Peterson.
State Auditor, H. L. Holmes.
Attorney General, c. n. Frich,
Railroad Commissioners, Z. s. Deisem, j
Christianson, E. Stagne.
superintendent OF Public c1nstructiOn, w.
L.. Stockwell.
Commissioner Of Insurance, &c. Coop.
Commisgicrer Of Agriculture and Labor,
VIC. Gi;breath,
Judges Supreme Court, N. G. Young, d.
E. Morgan. Edward Elgrud.
sENATUks.
First District, Judson Lam oure, Pembina.
Second District, Albert Garnet st. ThOm-
as.
REPRESENTATIVES.
First District, J. 4. Briden. WalhalIa,
Second District, John Trumner, Cava-
lier, G. Ganssle, st. Thomas, JOS. Wal
ters, Gardar.
Halleon.
Judge of the District Court, Seventh Ju.
dicjaI Dlstricl,W. J. kneeshaw, Penn.
Clerk of District Court, Geo. Peterson.
COUNTY OFFIClRe.
States Attorney, Nj. Brypjolfson.
Sheriff. Chas. Atkinson.
Auditor, Swain Thorwaldson
Treasurer, Frank H. Anderson.
Register of Deede, } i. +. CHI.
County Judge, T.. G. Wick.
Superintendent Of Schools. F. N. Sherats
Surveyor, +. e. Hebert
Coroner, DR.. u. r. Erskine.
Public Administrator, John Halcrow.
BOWesmOnt.
COUNTY COMMISSIONERS.
First District, F. G. Myrlck, Pembins.
Second District. s. Sigurdson, Gardsr.
Third District, Fred ]. Farrow, Cavalier
Fourth District, j. N. Horgan. Neche.
Fifth Dist, A. T. Cox, BOwesmont.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1906-05-11
Civil Service Examination

Date of examination, May 18th; place,
Pemblna; position, deputy collector and
inspector; salary, So per diem.
The United States civil service commits.
sion announces that on the date and at
the place named above, an examination
will be held for the position indicated.
AS result Of this examination certifica-
ton will be made to fill the vacancy in
the position indicated, and other similar
vacancies as they may occur in first
grade positions in the customs service in
that city or district
The examination will consist of the
subjec mentioned below, weighted as
indicated:
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1906-05-11
TELEPHONE.

Two of the most wonderful inventions
OF recent years, if not in all history are
the telephone and the phonograph. 1t is
a curious fact that while one of these in
ventions is just as wonderful and remark
able as the other, yet one has come into
general use as an almost indispensable
utility, while the other has hardly gotten
above the rank Of a toy.
Personally we never speak and hear
over the long distance telephone without
still mentally marvelling at the possiril-
ity of the transmittal of the voice over
a slender wire for miles of distance.
The telegraph was wonderful but
simple, as simple as communication by
pulling on a string. one pull to mean
yes andtwo to mean no, ETC., but when
it is possible to send voices and sounds
over the wire SO that even ''the dog
knows his masters voice. and that for
hundreds of miles, it would seem that
man had almost seized the powers OF
angels for his own uses.
Akin to the wonder of the invention
itself, is the rapid spread of the tele.
phone lines all over the world. 1t took
many years for the telegraph to become
at all general. even after it was known to
be a success, but the telephone
though only about twenty years of age
already rivals, if it does not surpass the
miles Of wire of telegraph.
The fact that anyone can use the tele-
phone makes it available to everyone,
and its convenience and utility now
makes it almost universal in the cities
and it is rapidly invading the country
and it will not be many years before the
telephone wire will be in every farmers
house. .5e.. a
In this county; even, the wires are
already well spread and this summer
will go long extensions. As to utility,
h i = . fact that mankind got along very
.igs
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1906-05-11
County News

D. D. Warner has gone to Illinois on
land business.
| Cavalier had an oratorical contest last
Monday evening.
Hamilton public school teachers will
all stay another year.
Cavalier is laying lot more cement
walks this summer.
Crystal contributed $50 so to help out
the San Francisco people.
A meeting to consider the observance
of Memorial day was called at Hamilton.
John Thomson of Bathgate will resign
the Job of postmaster and Sam White is
looking for the place with the approval
of the citizens including the Pink Paper.
liver Often now carries the rural mail
out of ST. Thomas vice VIM. Dunlop, re-
signed.
Chas. Burgess and Ed Stong left
Cavalier last week for land hunt up IN
the Canadian northwest.
The Foster Land agency had some
home seekers from Illinois and Wiscon-
sin in tow at Bathgate last week.
Hoople had benefit concert of home
talent and realized s62~ 25 as contribu-
ton to the San Francisco relief fund.
Robert Hall r. turned to his home in
Cavalier last week after attending at the
death bed of his mother who lived IN
Ethel. Ont.
]. T. Blackjack OF Walhalla had a re.
lapse but is better again. Grand Forks
specialists think he may have to have an
operation.
Simon Thompson of Beaulieu has sold
one quarter section to Chas. Sobey for
5000 and another quartes to Peter
Dunniagan, and has one quarter left.
Louis Peavy is likely to sell his Bath
gate belongings and start livery sable
in one of tile new towns in Town
er or Cavalier counties.
Mr.. and Mrs. VIM. Lee of Walhalla
who are at Battle Creek sanatarium,
write that they are somewhat improved
but the results are not as pronounced as
they would wish.
S. L. Haight is home again at ST.
Thomas after spending the winter at
Pullayup, Wash. Mrs. Haight stopped
over at Winnipeg to visit her daughter,
Mrs. Thexton.
DR.. Suter and family are expected
home this week after winters absence
in the east where the doctor has been
taking post graduate course in med
icine and surgery.
Albert Garnett has issued his card
as candidate for the senatorship in the
second district, to succeed himself Mr..
Garnett made a creditable record during
his former term and will doubtless be
returned again without serious opposi.
tion. N. 4 4
Mrs. cleary who lived between Nc
Lean and Hallson, while driving ! COW
that had q new born call, had the COW
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1906-05-11
Total,

Age limits, 20 years or over. All mail
applicants must have the medical certih-
csrte in the application blank executed.
TMs examination is open to all clllzens
of the United States, who comyly with
the requirements.
For further information address the
secretary OF the board of examiners, at
the custom house. or at the place named
above. or the undersigned.
No application will be accepted unless
properly execated and filed in complete
form with the undersigned prior to the
hour of closing business, on May 9th,
1906. M. SHOEMAKER,
St. Paul, MINI.
Secretary 9Th Civil Service District.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1906-05-11

The PIONEER EXPRESS le sent only on the di.
rect order of subscribers and is continued anti
ordered stopped and all arrearages paid.
The rate Of subscription is alike to all, $2.OG
per year. Subscribers paying in advance have
the choice of several premium papers in sddi,
ton.
''Sample" or ''marked copies" are sent ae com.
plimentary only, and while we desire them to be
considered as invitations to subscribe, they will
not be continued except upon request.
The PIONEER EXPRESS is the best advertising
medium in the county, having u more general
circulation than any other paper. Card o ratet
'ent on application.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1906-05-11
Candidates
Announcement

| desire to announce myself as a re-
publican candidate for the office OF
sheriff of Pembina county, and respect
fully solicit the support of the voters at
the primary election on June 10Th.
GEO. ROADHOUSE.
| hereby announce myself as Repub-
lican candidate for the Office of Clerk of
the District Court for Pembina County.
have served for a number of years
as deputy in this office and am
thoroughly conversant with every detail.
Should the people of this County honor
me with election to this position,
pledge myself to give to the office my
personal supervision and best attention.
Dated March 18th, 1905.
GEO. PETERSON.
AS the patrons of the register of deeds
Office seem satisfied with the way the
business has been conducted in the past,
l hereby announce myself as candidate
for re election on the republican ticket.
JOHN F. GILL.
hereby announce myself as candidate
for County Superintendent of Schools ON
the Republican ticket and respectfully
solicit the support of the voters
Pembina county at the primary election
June 10Th.
I'm. SHERARTS
thereby announce myself as can
didate for the Republican nomination
for County Judge subject to the prlm; ry.
l respectfully solicit the support of the
voters of the county and should appreci-
ate the Endorsement of being nominated
and elected for second term.
H. G. WICK.
Trusting that the knowledge and ex-
perience acquired as deputy tor the pres
ent county auditor may be favorably
considered, and that my personal quail
fications may be found satisfactory,
hereby announce my candidacy for coun-
ty auditor and respectfully request the
support Of the Republican party at the
ensuing primary election on June 10th.
WILLIAM w. Eel SON.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1906-05-11

passing strange that nobody takes the
opportunity to write up the "Looting OF
North Dakota" that is, if these victims
are North Dakota, as they say they
are.
Indiana tribuÌˆne. (Indianapolis, Ind.) 1878-1907, 1906-11-15

e&uItra-g1oI. Sursb. 10 bs 20 mA
tn Dur4f&nst, 1ae 10 Stuns Drr6s6rti.
lie, 10 BIB IL Ef,rah Ice.
0sp66eItes e@uss1sfirita - axoaeaIo;ss
Baxcp Big sab 90: alerss Hsas sls. 90: Eoas
" 5000; Csort GIsar 1850: annrf
Sls. 90.
Harfs - gerdu@erts RrctmusA Sc,
6raxihrrter 72e; BoIosaa tx Dar,nes 7ss ID
xu@ 6He.
Sped-2Iare Settex. 90 bs 90 9fuxb In
Dur1i4nttt, lake; aI0rs Gsttsx, 90 BIB 80
Sinuo, l2ie: Hlars Esusss, SIS bss 90 sfunb
&c; Ia bis TO-, i8e; ID ss is HfuaA,
l&e; 9!rre Slides, h!s 90 Clash, 12fe:
aades Is tts ls Rfpah laki sAara sadsas
DID Q Rtuno. 12s
GrnbhGd'S ped-2IGssy Gxsftfh Susst zoe
sspdbIisr eusar GarsS zoe, s--7 1fmsb 10
Dsr&i9nst tic 8 b@ Q nfuxs tx grs@s
i4nitt l6e; 10 bio ID Ftuxb hu Ssutf6xtt
lbe; 5pfaHb tn Drra.9xKt, iamsl. I8ft.
6 Ptanh tn Durfi4sut, i3Ea. lbs.