Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1906-01-25
and give it the power.

| Epn trleO IL Ne IdlQ uoWn, lO"ereu II
close to his face and hauled the rope
that set her a buzzin' and went tc
sleep. Middle Of the night he wakes
up and heard a noise, and thought
twas thieves come to torture him fol
his moIey. So he gets up in bed
whack one of the arms Of that ere
fymill caught him right on the ear.
He thought twas burglars sure, then,
and hollers Murder |" and Help u
nuff to wake the dead. An every
time he would sit up that hymill
would knock him down again. he
was purity nigh used up W en- Siddie
and the old man got to him.
So he was more down on Siddie
than ten thousand of bricks and made
his will, over again, leavin' everything
to Maria an me, and back he come to
live with u.s. This time we thought
we had him for Keeps, cause he was
dead set again Siddie and her tribe
and the best name he could get for
them WIS "murderers, and if you
mentioned inventions he would rave
for hours at time.
Well, he comes along and staid at
our house. A couple of years went
by and he was still with us. Maria
and me begun to put down list of
things we was goin to buy when the
property was ours. New melodian
for the parlor, new whatnot, new
cover for the sitting room sofy and
any quantity of things. And the old
man was gettin' older. crankler and
deeter every day.
Got SO it wus kind o joke, as yer
might say I'd DO it at the table just
for fun. Have some beans. yer old
image'" I'd ask him, the furst part
loud enough to take yer head off ard
the rest in an ordinary tone Of voice.
And then Maria'd pucker ur her face
to keep from larfn.
For them two years he never men
toned Siddie's folks except to run EN-
down, but all at once he began to
change his tune. Begun to wonder
how they were gettin along, and said
he would like to see EN-. till Maria
and l begun to get real worried.
His seventy-e eighth birthday was
comm and we thought 'twould please
him if we made kind O celebration
of it, We talked it over some and
Maria said she'd get up special din
ner, and have whoopin' birthday
cake. told her it was foolishness,
but she was set on it and said he was
old and childish and would be tickled
to death, so | let her 60 ahead.
Well, the mornin of his birthday |
hitched up and drove to town, and
she and Pansy Nicholson got to talkin
about the minister's wife how ex-
travagant Nathaniel Nixon was since
he got married, and one thing and
another, till twas II o'clock fore she
started home. On the way che met
Lysander Holmes who drives the mail
cart, and he says: Lett package at
your house twas for your Uncle
Ephy."
We had fine dinner, roast beef
and plum puddin' and heaven knows
what, but nuthin' suited Uncle Eph.
He growled at the vittles and said
this was burnt and that was raw, till
l got madder'n a young heifer. FL
nally Maria went out and fetched in
the birthday cake. Twas a noble
cid cake l tell yer; there was Uncle
Ephum on it all done in peppermint |
lozenges; Maria made the letters go
big there wasn't room on the end for |
the IN. Here's big slice for you
Uncle" l howled and then / says in
my usual voice, Looks as if it will |
poison you and l hope to goodness it
will"
Well, he just grinned and took the
slice and began to eat it and get |
down and pulled my mustache down
80 as he wouldn't see my lips move
and commented. l sartinly did give
it to him hot and heavy. Maria had |
to cough half a dozen times to keep |
from lar6n' right out. See i'm eat,
I'd say. I'VE have got him this time
Every mouthful is as good AS deed
to two acres of that hop field. Have
some more? That's right. Well
kill the dear old reptile this time.
can see the melodisn il the psrlor.
Order the undertaken, Maria it is
the best days work you ever done !
When he had finished three whoop-
ing slices, says: BETTER have lit
tie more, you old alligator, we want