Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-02-25

rhinoceri, with their funny ornamental
horns or even hippopotamii, with their cute
and splashy little ways. But from mon
keys? Never, at no time.
Ladies and gentlemen, the Honorable Bah
is proud of his size To me he has confided
this. In my ingratiating way 1 sounded
him-I asked him all about It.
Bah, | yelled, crowding up close to him
and making funnel of my hands-Mr. Bah
cock isn't deaf. but his ear was far away
does 1t make you peevish to tote around
SO much excess baggage"
"Notadamnbit," replied the Honorable
Bah, amiably. glancing in a pier glass on
the opposite wall to note whether he was
wearing tan shoes or patent feathers, L am
used to it,
And as I chatted confidentially with him
from the doorway-there being no one
around to listen and the room being crowd
ed-he told me this moving tale;
X
My boy he said, as he laid his hand
upon the wide ledge at the third button Of
his waistcoat. do you see this shelf? Gaze
at 1t carefully. for it once saved my life.
was fishing on the bosom of q Wisconsin
lake and a storm came up. Dark grew the
heavens and the baleful lightning split the
skies asunder. My little vessel. even bal
lasted il was, reeled before the blast; the
cork came out of the fishing tackle; dis
aster reigned on eve side. Two days was
| buffeted by the elements and starvation
stared me in the face. l was alone! | was
hungry And then as 1 called on heaven
for help weakness oyercame me and my
good right hand fell upon this shelf Oh
happiness! Oh peace! oh, bliss! oh, &C.
stacy! Oh, joy! 1 was saved!
How was that?'' l inquired with more
ease. having cleverly constructed a mega
phone out of three District bills.
ION the shelf" replied the Honorable
Bah, removing a pale globular tear with the
initial digit of his smithfield. were suft-
cient provisions for a bounteous repast. l
have forgotten just what was there. but
know the supply included box of sardines.
a tin of biscuits. three loaves of bread and
a box of cigars. Do you wonder that this
excess baggage proposition appeals to me?
How did these things happen to be on
the shelf?' inquired after an appreciative
pause
"Damn1no." replied the Honorable Bah,
with a matchmaking chuckle II sup
pose 1 placed them there temporarily and
forgot them. Oh, providental disremem-
brance! Oh, sweet aphasiar
So you see. ladies and gentlemen, that it
the Honorable Bah. He doesn't need them
and he doesn't want them. Sufficient unto
the meal are the provisions therefor.
Ladies and gentlemen. any one entering
the Honorable Bab's committee room
will be struck at once with the
splendid collection of implements of
the chase displayed on the walls
But passing lightly over the most
VI THESE. we VIII pduSt ouIY 10 mention
1.-The Babcock persuader," a large earnest
looking club. with nails in the end, that
hangs near the Honorable Bab's desk, for
the Honorable Bah has long been chairman
of the Republican congressional committee
and has rendered valuable service to his
party. There have been chairmen and
chairmen, but only one Honorable Bah. A
good collector Is not the creation of chance
When the republican party is before the
people. when an issue Is in the air, you
should see the Honorable Bah in action
The party needs the money and the gentle
man from Wisconsin has responded TO the
call.
Does he. tender-eyed and soft-voiced, WOO
the reluctant check? Does he, cooling and
persuasive. lure the bashful PUNK from the
sheltering sock toe with rhapsodies of plain
tive, searching melody? Not at no time
When the Honorable Bah goes on the war
path he leaves his music box at home and
his voice turks in his throat. For the Hon
orable Bah is wise He knows that love
the escape valve of an overcharged steam
radiator. But the Honorable Bah carries
his earnest-looking club and his good right
arm Is strong.
Didst ever see a froclicsome youth club
bling chestnut tree? Didst ever hear the
rattle of the barbed burrs upon the frosted
grounds? DfdSt ever see a vested interest
swatted on the coco with a fence rail? Didst
ever see the corpulent pocketbook yawn
open at the siren song of the war club? II
you do not know whereof I speak, ladies
and gentlemen, there are still some things
left for you to see. Wait until the next
congressional campaign. We will make the
rounds with the Honorable Bah.