The Lake County times. [volume] (Hammond, Ind.) 1906-1933, 1906-10-01
A. NJ. Turner Forgets Alias
and Narrowly Escapes
Serious Consequences.
JOKE WONT STAY PUT
Local Banker "Pinched" For Speed.
ing-Goes Into a Day Dream
In Chicago Court.

The ballin in crowded Chicago
court room stood up and called, John
smith: John Smith. John Smith"
There was complete silence for mo-
ment AMI finally the Judge declared in
stentorian tones. The case goes by de-
fault A. NJ Turner Of this city sud
denly jumps to his feet and exclaim-
Cd: Il am John Smith; plead guilty;
what is the hne?"
The story trickled into the THE
LAKE COUNTY TIMES office and Is sim
ply too good to keep.
About two months ago A. NJ. Turner
took Mr. and Mrs. Will Mashlno and
the genial postmaster, Billy Gostlin. for
a ride in his auto The trip took the
party TO the smooth boulevards on the
south side in Chicago. The novelty
ard exhiliration of motoring had not
vet lost its charm for Mr.. Turner and
when tae party reached the Midway
the desire to speed 'er up a little
was simply irresistible.
The Turner automobile flew down
tire boulevard ana the verdict of the
party was that it was simply Immense
They 'sid not see a park policeman
glance at the number os the auromo-
bile through the corner Of his eye ana
then make a note of it il his little
book
on the way back the party took the
same route and uuknown to them the
sane policeman sat on his horse on the
same spot. When he saw Mr.. Turner
approaching he rode out and stopped
him. lie told him that he Lad been
exceeding the speed limit and that he
was under arrest
Tries Persuasion.
Mr. Turner tried to argue with the
officer but the arguments had no eff
feet Finally he said that he would
pay the fine on the spot if the police
man would only let him go. 1t was of
no use and the luckless Hammond
banker was told that he would have
to go to the station.
took the precaution 10 ride very close
to the machine and this nettled Mr.
Turner.
Cant YOU ride ahead or behind.
there is no use letting everybody know
that I'm pinched
III ride right where 1 am" said the
policeman. and the sorrowful party
moved onward
The BANKER was getting desperate
He decided TO pull out ahead of the
policeman anyhow. but did not sue
cecd in opening the gap very FAR when
the cop" yelled. stop, or I'll shoot"
Finally an idea occurred to Mr.. FUR
uor and lie said to the policeman:
Now. I wish you would let this matter
drop. I was once sheriff of Lake
county. and"
The officer would not let him finish
the sentence THAT is all the greater
reason why YOU should know better"
said ne and the party continued on
their way while women and girls wav-
ed their handkerchicfs from the sec
ond story windows and made the SIT
uation quite embarrassing.
At the police station MIR. Turner, who
save his name as John Smith. ssked
to plead guilty and pay his fine, but
the Judge said he would have to ap-
pear for trial and set the date for the
following Monday. The bond was s25.
and as Mr. Turner did not have that
much with him. Billy Gostlm had to
put up the cash.
a Little business Trip
when Monday came Mr.. Turner Went
to Chicago on a little business" An
hour or so later he found himself back
in the courtroom on the south side.
The room was filled with men who had
been drunk the night before and 9th
ers who were being tried for minor
onenses. The judge disposed OF case
after case until he finally eane TO that
OF John smith The baiIin called the
name. but the defendant failed TO ap-
pear When the judge finally deciar-
ed that the case OF John Smith had
gone by default. Air. Turner suddenly
remembered that he had given that as
his name ard it dawned upon him ali
at once that he had been sitting by and
allowed his oxn case TO so by default
He jumped to his feet.
Your Honor. I'm John smith, said
he. and I would like TO plead guilty"
The 5adse smiled and after telling
him that as. long as it was his first
| offense he would net be hard on him
he fixed the ane At s. and costs. The
Judge admonished the Hammond man
TO so and sin no more, ana Mr.. Turner
went