The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1906-01-31
SEQ SIDE STEPS AND TALKS
ABOUT THE WOMEN.
SuprestfOns For q New Industry.

Suggestions For a New Industry.
Deer Gents-I need the 81 mpathy Of all
married pussuns. Madam sea went 10
Town last week an bought 'erself rlcn 'as
Kre.sus, an me es poor es JVps connen.'on
al turkey. tuIs hL' turbelos an silks an
n cuuglComeration OF APPAREL tibet the IKE
OF " hich Amt been seen since the days Oh
Jeeusaphat.
whnfs 10 become NV EN-? When Madam
SEED got home, weemen ike hhe got Inside
Nv them ere glad rags and t1otted out Cd
dress parade iur ,nsl eetion, an hy Inc great
nom suuCn, I cuduehL tell whether the wuZ
a Poluk, d Eskimo, or Jes a ordinary lula
Ole deacon Smiths spouse wus the cause
Nv IL ALL. Las lail she Gought a DO. n DO ~
same K In Nv cat er DOther fur tue neB, an
paid IA dollars fur II, II hard cole piunKs.
She warient II seconds, by Inc CLOCK az
Washington, cummin' down on dress paraae
to see the madam. When enc arrived Inc
conversation lhet ensood wud er done creulI
Ter Mr.. William Penn with the lnJuns.
How dye ike IL? PERFECTLY entrahcln.
Don't yer thirk is Lice? why liz er lni.
nitabie darlin'' whu, eF az g'o1 TSei s si'I nv
ronvrrsallon tasted until Missus Deacon
| VhmoUst d the ranch.
knowed then madam sed was goln 70
hty one Nv them pek eals II the he'd 10 sell
The moody heller, to by II, Twhrnt long ater
that one Nv The nabors drspped IN ter see
the madam an the topic Nv conversation
v us lady Smiths bo. Don't you lblnk ls
no. v &? syys madam red. II serlenly do" sayt
the MAJOR, "lh- cutler Il o rid, eriectly orlld"
IAN warrenl sl4 er ortui price ~ pay lor such
a thing. says madam Eel, 200. says tns
nabor, II believe. is seccunI ana hSIo
sp The con vert alton went on In Ids straln
LII The nabor SGnoosed Inc rah2n'
repeat IL in all yearneslness EMS, Whuls
become Nv the wetmep why I've hearn az
how In Abbeville b weeman won't 20 oul on
the streets lessen 1he's got sum kin vi nnim
rom her mex. Clothes won't do. gGtter
have er. animal.
Pab Sliiz bad the "Jimmes" while ID
Abbcyllle unct In bed been SEEN SNAKES On
things fur sum time, so Uns MOI MIN be wus
totin hisse II down street on a torter WINDY
day an mel q lady with erbout TWO 3aIds Nv
cat roun her mex. jest as she passed sHlz lne
end NV the cat blowed Inter sll'ze's face an
II kkeert i'm 30 bad he Rwore OF Iur ~ days.
A weemen now-eI-days jes naeher!ly dom
feelkIike they're drtst lite lessen lheyre got q
ward er hal or two yards Nv minks potsum
or coons eIroen then ut ks an thtr hans run
Fla 10 thru err fox er coon er measel er some
kin Nv val mint for q mutt ter keep the bans
warm. Gloves won't do, . no, gloves is out
Nv date, gotter have some Kin Nv Varment.
This Thing il Iuipin' The culIud female ira
ternity, too. They're tryln TO keep In the
gallup with the white Slslren an they amt no
further BIT hind than me aIlm,ghly IaoOit ID
behind the ole cats and mlLks. The white
weeu en- wear pole CATS All mlDks an Inc
cuIlud weemen jrs make rabbits an pCssuns
do. I'ken bel NO lurlbei,n 10
| HeuIb DHCK "DeD pOFsuiie j
al all but nua-well Us Keep y'r e1es
skinned an oul. BITE thet the cuilud weemen
er keepen the pUssums skinned.
When the weemen make up liner minus
tibet they've got Ter have CATS Ter ther hecks
an hans nu,hiL' short Nv the dteresl laid
strategy is goin 10 keep EN- rum II. Ia soon-
er Vi nerlake Ter dam up S~urVauper river
with er one boss lode Nv broom sage es Ter Try
ter char ge ther way 8 one lOler.
Any Industrious young man can make
er fortune now In II days by Johnsons rale.
rode clok. Here's how 1t Ken be dun. Get
| that new reject fur lanin Jether, any yam
Rer'II seIl IT to yer iur five dollars, an put you
up er big lapy ard, anu then put er ADVERTISE
ment IN the Press and Banner an Medium
eumthln ike this: Forty MILTON ha9Dla,
Mink. Coon Postum an TOlecat hides
waited all al once, 1heu lake yer Idnkee
r. ceel al srlck 'eu up an So TN tOEelher RI
goosegreas' EN- an make 'ein into lh,se out
winks AN things ihet the pore deiuded Weem-
en- are ravin' over. All you've got ter do
then IL ter advertize yourgoods an you've got
en- when yer go 10 adVertlze, however. you
want TO change The wordin someWhut.
sumthIn like this Uud be proper:
Ground sab sale Nv elrRent turs!
Oriul slorter Nv prices j.!
BArgensi In furs lhet o.ly come Wild lne
comet Nidak, evry three thousand one hun
derd al seventeen years. It's not the chapce
Nv q life time but the chance Nv ninety lore
an fifteen thirty thiIds life times! =.
Fourteen lhousan' Polar bar murtfs knoked
dow frum 25 dollars 10 $3.50. obese cud be
mn de FUN choice rabbit tales, es In Inform.
red is already dun. This particular part nv
the rabbit hes been throwed away fur luck
here erfore, but It's too valuable er by
produk. an the thing mus be stopped)
Ten thousand nine hundred Juguar DOS
frum canneJuharie Nv most sumptlous quail
ty marked down 10 9.49! Splendid value al
er hunderd dollars, y GU cud make these out
Nv brinnel cats, es LIN Informed hes already
been dun)
Thirteen sumpteously artistik an granly
executed MawatL furs, all thets left out Nv the
orlginaIN. The same es Miss Alice Roosfelt
wares 10 social iuuctlons, The las hide Nv this
rare an extinkt animal IL In thes supereleeant
lot Nv mex wear marked down TO SILT!
Crhese cud be maneriactered outPn ordinary
rabbit hides, an here's wher you'd make yer
jack. Thy Amt one woman in er thousan
cud resist it.)
You'd not only cit es rich as Rockefeller but
youd con Ter @ everlasting blessln on the pore
men Nv this cuptry who hev ter by these
yankee kats fur Their wives an darters jes IN
order ihet they may be fasbunable.
wanter put Wilsun Henry add Cumpany,
an Haddun AN the moo Smith cumpenny on
notice lhet If they selis my Wife a twenty
five dollar cat thet they do so al Their peril.
Very umbly yourse,
Guilermo Sed.
P. S.
Since written this the cook has kilt The las
house kat on the place an is warm 1t erroun
her neck in the klch.n with the thermome'
ter stapdin LOG. u. >.