Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1906-02-10
HIS MAIDEN CASE

torney. My maiden case was one of
petit larceny Bill Dawkcs. one OF
those trIfllng, good sort of fellows 50
called because good for nothing had
been found In possession Of a carcass
OF mutton which the owner had left
hanging out overnight ana which was
non est-that IL TO say turned up miss
Ing I'm the morning
Il drafted the Indictment with great
care charging William puwkcs. yeo-
pian. with stealing one carcass of NUT
Ion. the personal property Of one Pela-
tiah Potts ont Of thc possession and
against the will of the said Pelatiah.
feloniously and with force of arms. did
steal take and carry away.
What's the natter asked sharp
:. ly when my friend Bob G. burst out
laughing on hearing me read over this.
my first professional production.
Its the best joke of the season.
said Rob
"'What tsp
why. that pun-calling sheep
thief Il ycoman.
My office was scene OF confusion
NJ the end of live minutes BohS head
had gone through the glass door Of my
bookcase. two of my three chairs lay
with broken legs ana Rob and had
pair of black eyes between us. II was
more than month before either spoke
10 the other
but I'm wandering from the point.
In due time the prisoner was brought
III for trial Old POLLOK appeared for
the defense
"Old l.. was character The only
law book he had ever read was
Swami Treatise For justices Of the
Peace but in that ana the Scriptures
he was powerful He had a way Of
quoting and applying the latter, which
In a religious community made II diff
flcult to oppose him without mourning
Il suspicion OF orthodoxy His forte
lay In carrying the jury, whom he gen
orally succeeded IN convincing that he
and they We're on one side and his ad-
versary on the other His style OF
grammar was original.
II had carefully written out my
opening. and when read Il over 10
Nellie Wynne. To whom was paying
attention at that time, she said II was
real nice. which | knew was feminine
for bully an encomum felt not lii
tie proud Of
When the case came on spoke my
piece without bunder cited my
authority 10 prove that he in whose
possession stolen property IS found
soon after the theft IS In law presumed
to be the thief | was prepared TO
prove. said. that the property in ques-
ton had disappeared NJ the dead hour
OF night. when all honest people were
in their beds. and had been found at
early dawn In the Smokehouse OF
Dawkes the defendant
II put my witness on the stand and
proved the ownership, value and iden-
tlty of the property its mysterious dis
appearance and subsequent reappear-
ance in the constructive p.ssession OF
the prisoner and rested
odd POLLOK sat In solemn silence,
his eyes closed and his red bandanna
over his head He asked no questions
and called no witnesses was disap-
pointed nj the old fellows giving IN 50
easily II would take away half the
glory OF the triumph
But was reckoning without my
host
"Old POLLOK slowly got up on his
legs and removed his bandanna and,
taking up the Bible on which the clerk
had sworn the witnesses. began:
IL am grleved, my brethering he
always called the jury his hrethering
II am grleved and sore amazed to
hear such heathenish doctrines In a
Christian courthouse As we've Jest been
llstenin 10. What seZ the sacred vol
ume | hold in my handf Why, II ser.
AT the mouth OF two witnesses let ey-
cry matter be established. Now, my
bretherng LEI me ask what two wit
nesses what one witness seed my cli-
ent hook this sheep; Echo answers
Nary one, My delooded young brother
has read profane authors to show that
findin' OF goods on the wrong mans
premises IL proof OF his stealth EN-.
It's presumption Of law he says,
and a great piece of presumption II is
my brethering. Now. In this same sa-
cred volume we have narrated case
Ia pint that OF one Benjamin, which
you all hearn about A silver cup
wuth a hundred times as much as this
trumpery sheep, was disklvered not
way off in Benjamin's smokehouse.
whar Benjamin moughtn't a been for
a week. but chucked into the mouth Of
the very sack he was rdln' onto Ben
jamln was innocent But my brother
ing II 1t was BenJamln's luck instead
OF my poor, unfortunate clients 10 be
this day on trial before you you would
be obliged. accordln 10 my unexperl-
enced brother, To bring him IN guilty
In spite Of Scripter, and conslgn him to
a place whar he would have 10 wear
coat of many colors Of ii different stripe
from his brother Joseph's
II not only lost the case." said the
Judge. but my office at the next elcc-
ton. my attempt 10 COMPUTE old PoIi-
fovsa geripttrn "a relrrnapt prnutfnrs a