davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1906-01-13
~HE jokesmiths must look to their
laurels. The high finance funny


 laurels. The high finance funny
 men are crowding into the field.
 First came Rockefeller and liar riman. and now Henry H. Rogers is eXuding an oily humor and is causing explosions of nirth that sound like the bursting of tanks. Rogers jokes arc of the Standard variety They are nearly as bad IS that pun. They be- long to the village cut-up order. They arc of the sort that our great grand fathers used to enjoy and are as play full as those of Chauncey NJ. Depew. When man gets 10 be worth fifty or a hundred millions the humor simply pours out of him like petroleum out of a flowing we'll To him q lawsuit is one intending round Of merriment. Ev- cry time he receives a dividend he bursts into uproarious laughter. When ever he drives | small competitor out of business his glee can be heard around block even if the competitor does commit suicide. The putting up of prices that bring him in an extra million makes him guffaw and double up with the pure fun of the thing His wit grows keener as his fortune in creases. The spectacle of the public sweating and straining to pour money into his coffers is So eXcruciatingly laughable that he almost chokes with bilarity. And when the said public becomes tired of the programme and tries to apply the law to him as it does 10 ordinary folks his nirth knows no bounds. It is So ludicrous he al- most explodes with merrimcnt. He pokes fun at the lawyers who ask him questions, ct the states. they represent, at the supreme courts and at the world in general. It is so deliriously anus ing that he roars at his own jokes. He is so full of good nature that he could extract joy from a funeral. To be re- minded that he has broken the laws makes him kittenish in his mirth.
 Nero may have fiddled while Rome burned, but if some of our high finan- ciers had been there their cachinnations would have drowned the cries of the victims. It would. that is, if the high financiers were losing no money by the flames. There is nothing like well
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1906-01-13
"The Man oi Mystery

The man chiefly wanted was Henry ClGy Pierre of the Waters Pteree com peny. He has lived st the WsHoTf-As- toria hotel for a number of years. where his seciuEion and secrefiveness have caused him tp te esiie1 tile man of my vstery. \ pro-ess server went to the greet nlagnate's rooms. which con S5sr of two Sumptuaus suits in about tha highest priced hotel o8 earth. How the man with the SutTnegaa g9t sccess io the apartments l. isss related. but l. wss probably through subierfugc. Al any rste. Pioree seV him first and fei to fhe bathroom. There he locked him self in. The prccess serveT calmly waited a-tssde. while the 0il king han assrt-j sad baHgsI te aitract attention
 s- sIi the family were sssEf- be fziiss! fy rasse any o1e for orer a hoar- At last a se-v.rt heard tfse rsrks-g anf earae ts fhs rsScsBr- Fsfere-e s-Kr.lSine-l that b. wsnse,I fEs. bss4I te =5eet the usn vi.h the s1hTce1a- vtich was se- p-s-iinzIy dsue- after vbaeI. Mr. Pferce eHnerzei from -he ksthusu ia sH his rzT-74ti dignity. Ef sn srszIBsry sssn is -sare-f IOr a ufsn-@z- e1u-5 esheers zeuersEy have ns trs1tle Ia Bstfi1z him b1- If fhe prese1re ef StaEdzrd O1 nan is required eT9y ueth01 10 eTs1e sanne7z hat iBe78l1. can de
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1906-01-13

The forest sorvis-a has Hsen eenduet- ;sg .y1eusfyc te.ts at tIsn F r. EIrt..u
 LumI--r Cr-s savmilL resr Charfe>tou. :. C.. to determine tho strength of lei.- lsily vine. This tim5eT. rhiez ls known on the IoczI mzTkst ss North CsrcIina pine. forms t5s greater psrv gF the lumber rHf al tbss mIn The .obIoIlr pine fu-ufslseS a useful -ga- sr-Betbou timber cF EE.sssp1ate srrpaz't- Is gF very rapid g-svtb. sHi repre-
 dues readily Fg~ tbFsA reaSons it uiI remain une q Tts 4sgs1 iHBFsTtsHt tirbe- tress .f The s,gutb- CorrsCt data gzi Tfs strength vIiI f5s sf Teruna- uert vaIre- IT 5< fs1ud mseh more rgnreaisnI 70 take tlse testing Hazehins fs the mn i1Stesd q bsfnzfnz the IsrSe ss5eEs sf tT1h.r ts the IzboEsts-y ircz tts uin Ihe o1zd5tiezs b
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1906-01-13

owned by the Standard, bought their oil from it and shared with it their profits. As result he instituted the present inquiry. Being from the state whose accredited motto is ..Youll have to show me" he demanded to be shown why a foreign corporation could break the laws he was sworn to enforce. He is enough of fighter that his desires will either have to be compiled with or there will be trouble. He may not be as old and delft as the high priced Standard attorneys. but he is in ear nest. Moreover. he has Governor Folk and the great state of Missouri behind him. besides being supported by pub lie opinion throughout the country. Mir. Hadley is rather tall. smooth faced man. an accomplished speaker and is one who is not to be bulldozed. over awed or ridiculed from following a course that he believes 10 be right. His case is before the supreme court of Missouri. and he proposes either to make the Standard Oil company obey the law or cease doing business in the state.
 The independent company game is believed to De an old one with Rocke- fcller and his Satellites.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1906-01-13
Wis. AIIce Roo..ven-. Pine rur..

Miss Alice Roosevelt. the presidents daughJcr. will have in her trousseau set of very valuable silver fox. the skins of whici. rAre presented to her fin H0ngbnng by tha British governor zen eraL ssys a Washington >I-erial dis F.stch tO the New York Timss. Tbey ara now Icing made up bvsa Washing ion fu-Ticr. who lIss t-een ordered fo is- lvrr thern Sn Feb 1s at the White Hp1=n The @eIJsr v-iII f-s in tIe wide Stole efTe~i- Tpzrhing far down the ba-k and running to a pliBt cIoss to the ben of inc skirt in front. Tho muf viii te i1 the prevailing lsFzs fat shaTe. ani there ~i1 he : tg-sue of tha ssre. zfth a Ubitc feather Ths e~.IIar s-d ulnT VII lse Iiaei uffh rsEa zrsy b-1-s1a-F satin
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1906-01-13
BRYAN MADE \ "DATTo. .

Dulnan. Mindanao. Jan 13.-W. J. Bryan. yesterday. was created a dat. to'' and saluted by fifty pieces of na- tive artillery, after which he was con veyed along the river 10 Datto Piang's place in Il royal vinta la small boat. manned by forty Moros. At the palace he received many presents. Mir Bryan said that yesterday was the most in- teresting day he had spent in the Ori-
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1906-01-13
GarfieId's Ineuiry.

Al the same time Hadley is conduct. ing his investigation Commissioner Garfield. by direction of the president. is holding another inquiry into the Rockefeller methods. It is predicted that his report will bc ready by March ]. and enough of it has leaked out to show that it will make some startling disclosures. Mir. Hadley has had access 10 this testimony to assist him in mak. ing his own case. Mir. Garfield is said to be following especially the subsidi- zry concerns of tho Standard. The rsmificaticns cf the system are 90 wide as to te slnacst barf1iug. For ex- ample. it ovrs orer fo.sp miles Of r'pe lines. and along every line is telegraph wire. The company has its own operators. 90 1t poss4<sss a teie- graph systeE1 of its ovB. Tt earns sn annual prcft tsrs5UsIy estimated at from 40 to "a r-sr eent oa its actual in veSsment- It has invsd.d the s.eei hDsf- ihe copper field. the railroad tiesd and osher departments of busi ue-s- IL has a spy Sysfem ma-e extesl- sf-e than rh7t If the government. r. has a string of banks across the ccrr- tTy. snd n is increasing Ia EeSIsh and power hy leaps and foun.Is every rear. Even nsr stsasisrd men have teen re- po-1esl as saying tks1 -Reckeseiler is a bse-sr mxn than fhe p--zsieat-- If tIsey tan that ray nsv- h.sv vTiI theT tsEk In Eve yes-S.
 All fhis may h~ io<e to H H. Rog erz- but is # joke ts lhe A1ericsn people! LA EDGEEToN.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1906-01-13
Nc. q Ioke zifa Hssss,.

Hadiey hifnsrIf has tsEsn tho mai ter rly-g- saTi8rsl-- Et Es pot joke win him and ha evfneez s defermiua
 ten that Epforg he fz thrgarn with the matter it sllaH 10. s-e a Fs5se f9 the osf- er TDeupIc. Thae shar-e rkat be is try- fnz to use the investigates zs a lever tg elevate himself Iass rte zsfeTB0r- shig he SaEs he zSusd nd siznay by anszerlEz Herberz g Hzdley is . yo1nz r1sn- sss bo-1 In Kansas. edu- czted in the Sorthvester1 univsrxssy and began rhe Przcs5ce ef Izr ia Kan
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1906-01-13
''l'm From Missouri
 You'll Have to Show Mel"
Attorney General Hadey Mandate the Standard Oil Company Why His Inquiry Into the Trusts Methods Has Produced More Humcr Than Facts ... How Henry H.
 Rogers Regards It Joke.

wise or money can buy is evoked To outwit the law of the land. The only
 way service was had on Rogers was that man waited outside the oil
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1906-01-13
TO CURE A COLD IN ONE DAY

Take LAXATIVE PROMO Quinine Tablets. Druggists refund nancy if 1t fails to cure. R. W. GROVES sig na atlre Is on each box. 25c.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1906-01-13
Your Guests be Pleased

If you treat them with our Specia, HOLIDAY BREW for 1905. It's the finest beer we have ever before brew. cd. Bottled for home and hotel trad. as well as on draught and will be placed on the market on December i4th and until the holidays are over
 How about q half-barrel of fine old STOCK ALE for your cellarf Its very strengthening
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1906-01-13

developed sense of humor. especially when you have q strangle hold on the world ard fl is struggling to get away
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1906-01-13
DIRECTORY OF Reliable eSpeciaIists N WATERBURY.

Watch for "The Man On the Box"
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1906-01-13

(. JEROME BAILEY
 ARCHITECT. -Apotbecaries' Hall Building.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1906-01-13
HEARD IN PASSING

Man in St Louis has married nis mother-in-law. Carnegie should send him one of those medals at once New York Herald.
The Hawaiian star., 1906-04-26

ment of our measures into law, but
our appeals have fallen on deaf ears,
and we will hold the party in power
responsible for the failure to listen to
our grievances.
Last summer ] wrote Representa-
tive Cannon a letter urging that i'm the
appointment of the labor committee he
would select men known to be in SYM
pathy with the needs of labor men who
would advocate legislation that had
been indorsed by labor organizations.
My letter was acknowledged by Repre-
sentative Cannon's secretary, who
stated that he would call Mr.. Cannon's
attention to it on his return to the
capitol. l wrote the secretary and said
that l considered the matter of such
grave Importance that the letter ought
to be forwarded to Mr. Cannon without
delay, wherever he might be. l receiv-
ed no acknowledgment"
The council meeting today consider
ed several appeals from unions all over
the country, and requests for charters
We're received and referred
Following discussion on the appli-
cation of the steamhtters for charter
resolution was adopted inviting the
United Association of Plumbers and
the National Association of Steamfit-
ters, through their respective executive
boards, to select three representatives
each to meet like number of the exc
uctive council at the office of the Am
erican Federation of Labor for the pur-
pose Of arranging amalgamation,
Robert Mckee of Peoria, H., secre-
tary of the national organization Of
steam engineers, appealed to the cOun-
ell for the reinstatement of a repre-
sentative of that organization i'm the
Central Labor union of st. Louis, who
was removed because of holding po-
litical position.
The Hawaiian star., 1906-04-26

The Washington Star published the
following recently as it's leading edi-
torial:
President Roosevelt will not permit
his friends and admirers (among whom
nevertheless and Notwithstanding
The star continues to number itselD
to forget what most of them consider
his blunder i'm the Mrs. Morris drag
out case. Nearly everybody i'm Wash
ington was convinced that the election
of Mrs. Morris from the White House
was either entirely unnecessary and
wholly indefensible, or, if necessary,
that it was executed with unnecessary
and gross brutality There was a gen.
eral expectation, based on the pOpu-
lar idea Of the President, that he would
disavow the act, and i'm some way re-
jbuke those responsible for it. Instead
of doing so he hastily and without due
Consideration> committed himself to ap-
proval of their course; failed to respond
to the popular request for a fair in
vestgation when the whole affair was
fresh i'm memory and when eyewit-
nesses We're eager to be heard; and
later instituted a secret inquiry, in
official and disnterested eyewitnesses
were not invited to participate, as a
result of which the accused acquitted
themselves, and vigorously sustained
the Presidents precOnceived, and pre-
announced opinion. And now, to cap
the climax, the President, instead of
reproving in any way his tactless and
too strenuous "bouncer' rewards him
with the Washington postmastership
at double his present salary. This
position, when prestige and compensa-
tion are considered, would be to many
men the most desirable of the local Of
| fees. 1t pays more salary than a Dis
trict Commissioner or a Senator or
| Representative receives. In dignity and
prestige it surpasses the registership of
wills and the recordership of deeds. AS
an awkward result of the Barnes pre-
cedent there remain logically to be re-
warded at the expense of the District
the policemen who shared with Mr.
Barnes the honors i'm the Morris drag
out. What shall their harvest be-a
local judgeship, commissionership or
superintendency of police?
Irrespective of the peculiar humilia'
tion to the District involved i'm the
present case. the practice is all wrong
Of treating the local offices as the per-
sonal lcrquisites of the President. tC
be disposed of at his pleasure to poll.
teal or personal favorites, withou
consultation with or consideration o
the people of Washington. This com
munity has i'm the eternal fitness o
things as much right to be consulte,
about its local postmastership as Bal
t,morc. or Philadelphia, or New York
or Chicago about their pOstmasters. 1
has as much right as they to furnish :
representative man for the place, back
ed in his candidacy by local public sen
timent. The fact that the nationa
lcapItal is without political represent
alton and may not be able to enforc,
The Hawaiian star., 1906-04-26

its equities if assailed or encroached
Upon should make every just and up
right American more sympathetically
and .scrupulously considerate i'm pro
teC;mg its rights and interests.
Th, Determinations against the Dis
triCt Of Columbia as a political entity
are well known. Direct taxes are col
lected from the District. but no repre-
sentatives are allotted to it though the
Constitution couples the two things.
When the words throughout the Unit
ed States" are employed in the Const-
tuition, they have been held to include
tn District when uniformity of duties
IS presr,ibed and to exclude the Dis
trict when the time of national cleo
tons is fixed The District has been
pronounced a state under a treaty with
France, "a construction couferrlng pri-
V.leges on aliens, but not a state under
the Constitution whose people can sue
in the federal courts. 1t is thus treat
ed as a part of the Union of states
when burdens are to be imposed and
rot a state or part of the Union when
privileges are to be conferred. Practi-
ca'ly ii is treated as less than "A ter
ritory, when the political platform
planks promising home rule and local
offices to the territories come to be full
filled. our recordership of deeds, sus-
tanned entirely by the fees of the local
community has been converted into
politicGt sop to be thrown i'm reward 20
the most active partisan worker of
the COlored race outside of Washing
ton
Our district attorneyships and Judge
ships are coming to be merged if not
already merged, in the routine appoint
ments of the Department of Justice in
the selection of whom the community
is entirely negligible. AS these offices
are being treated as merely routine ap
pointments to be filled without scruple
by promotion from the Department of
Justice, so the postmastership Is com
ing to be treated in it's relation TO the
Post Office Department. In short, all
the local offices are coming TO be view
ed as in the vest pocker W the Presi-
dent and his cabinet. concerning the
disposal of which the people of Wash
ington have no rights which anybody is
bound to respect or even to consider.
Curiously enough, as the District has
increased i'm population and wealth and
RESOURCES, ulllll II SuIpdSStS III stature
the weakest of the sovereign states, in
stead of receiving increased national
and official consideration i'm these mat
ters its treatment has grown steadily
/, worse. And Notwithstanding his broad
democracy and his sincere devotion to
the principle of the square deal, which
have made him deservedly popular in
every state of the Union, there are few
. if any, of the Presidents who have been
less considerate of the people of the
capital i'm these special particulars than
President Roosevelt And in some in
stances, ceasing to be the chic public
servant of this group of Americans, he
has not even been a benevolent and
benehcent despot. Washington Star.
The Hawaiian star., 1906-04-26
ROOSEVELT and
THE EIGHT-HOUR LAW
THE PRESIDENT TELLS AMERICAN FEDERATION OF "A
BoR THAT HE PROPOSES ENFORCE
ASKS INFORMED CASES IN WHICH THERE HAVE
BEEN VIOLATIONS,

WASHINGTON, d. c., March 23-The
violations of the eight-hour law Of
which representatives, of the American
Federation of Labor told President
Roosevelt will speedily be corrected.
Following the interview between the
executive and the labor leaders and
the statement Of President Gompers
that the organization would enter poll
tics to secure relief, Mr.. Roosevelt in
formed the officials Of the organization
Of his intent
Frank Morrison, secretary Of the fed
Grafton, today received the following
letter yesterday:
My Dear Mr. Morrison: At our in
terview yesterday / requested you to
bring to my attention any specific vio-
lation of the eight hour law I would
like you to call my attention as soon
as possible to any of these complaints,
and l shall at once forward them to
Mr.. Neil of the labor bureau and di-
rect him to investigate them and report
direct to me.
Furthermore, | shall hereafter di-
rect all departments having control of
work as to which this law applies to
notify the Department of Commerce
and Labor when the work is begun,
and l shall notify the Secretary of the
Department of Commerce and Labor
whenever such notification reached
him, himself to notify the head of the
labor bureau, whose duty it then will
be to take cognizance of any complaint
made as to violations of this law, to
Investigate the same, and to report to
me.
''As you know, not only sympathize
with you on the eight hour law, but !
intend as a matter of course to see
that that law is efficiently enforced.
MY belief is that you will find that
with Commissioner Neill personally
the enforcement of the law all just
complaints will be met. Sincerely ours
(Signed) THEODORE ROOSEVELT" +"
Samuel Gorpers, president Of the Am
erican Federation of Labor, made this
statement today regarding the attitude
of organized labor:
Organized labor has petitioned Con-
gress time and time again to give con-
sideration to our requests for the enact
The Hawaiian star., 1906-04-26
Unparalleled
F r e E 0 F F E r

Hawaiian enabled present each its readers
old and new Of these rich toned instruments,
The Hawaiian star., 1906-04-26
Claus Spre Nls. VIM G. Irwin.
CIalSSprGCkGlS
BANKERS
HONOLULU, H. 1.
LIMITED.
B
HONOLULU,

San Francisco Agents-The Nevada
National Bank of San Francisco.
DRAW EXCHANGE ON
SAN FRANCUSCO-The Nevada Ma
tional Bank of San Francisco.
IONDON-~Tnion of London e. SIN tn s
Bank, 1t
NEW YORK-American Exchange Ma
tional Bank.
CHICAGO-Corn Exchange National
Bank.
\PARIS-Credit Lyonnais.
BERLIN-Dresdner Bank.
HONGKONG AND YOKOHAMA-The
Hongkong and Shanghai Banking
Corporation.
NEW ZEALAND AND AUSTRALIA
Bank of New Zealand, and Bank OF
Australasia.
VICTORIA AND VANCOUVBR-Bank
OF British North America.
TRANSACT A GENERAL BANKING
AND EXCHANGE BUSINESS.
Deposits Received, ~Loans Made on
Approved Security. Commercial and
aveuers' Credits issued. Bills Of Ex-
change Bought and Sold.
COLLECTIONS PROMPTLY AC-
COUNTED FOR.
The Hawaiian star., 1906-04-26
THE CORRECT FIGURES

The stars publication this afternoon
Of the Associated Press dispatch, Civ
ing estimates Of dead as from 800 to
1000, was correct, and not the publica-
tion Of the estimate as from 5000 TO
10000
The Hawaiian star., 1906-04-26
rHr YOKOHAMA SPECIE BANK
Limited.
ESTABLISHED 1880.
HEAD OFFICE, YOKOHAMA.

Branches and Agencies:
Honolulu New York, San Francisco,
London, Lyons, Bombay, Hongkong,
Newchwang, Pekin, Shanghai, TientslH,
Kobe, Nagasaki, Toxic, Osaka.
The Banks buys and receives for COL
lection Bills of Exchange, issue Drafts
and Letters of Credit, and transacts a
genral banking business.
Honolulu Branch 81 King Street
The Hawaiian star., 1906-04-26
WHAT CAN
YOU DO 4?

your friends your home Are you accomplish
cd pianist? Are you talented nger Are you possessed Of great
reading dramatic ability? Probably for these the excep
ton the rule Do you little and
you had little diversion for those friends you wish
you and here very thing you have been
looking for 1t is and necessity well luxury for every
home and through this
Valentine Democrat. (Valentine, Neb.) 1900-1930, 1906-02-22
SEED FOR MEADOWS.

AS a rule farmers are little inclined
to ask for help in the way of advice
in working out the troubles of the
farm. A man will go to his tailor and
rely on the latter's judgment as to
material and cut; he will be guided
by the advice of his grocer to some
extent, and so all through the list
of those from whom he buys with the
one exception of the scotsman. This
seems to be particularly true in the
matter of the selection of grass seeds
Seedsmen who make a specially OF
grass seeds have experimental proper
combinations for use to the best eff
feet on certain soils.
1t is safe to say that if a farmer
will describe in detail the character
of his soil, and the purpose for which
the grass crop is to be used, the seeds
man can make a selection of grasses
factory results than if the selection
were made by the farmer himself.
So to some extent with the State
experiment stations-many of them
have experimental extensively with
grass seeds and are in position to
advise planters as to selection. Farm
ers ought to make more use of the
information that may be had from
numerous sources for the asking than
they do-Indianapolis News.
Valentine Democrat. (Valentine, Neb.) 1900-1930, 1906-02-22
THE CHARM OF CHINA.

Beauty of It's Landscapes, the Tea
houses and Its Landscapes.
With all the offensive sights and
smells there is no denying a mystic
rious and alluring fascination in China
for all who come in contact with her
people under their native conditions,
says Guy NJ. Walker in the Chautau-
guam. Even the recollection of the dis
comforts Of travel by the native means
cannot blot out the beauty Of the land
scape, the terraced mountain sides, the
persimmon groves, the tea houses, the
diminutive gardens, the little patches
Of ripening grain, and the great toll
ing throng, always cheerful and con-
tented in spite of their unending tasks.
All who have been visitors to China
seem irresistibly drawn back to the
country. They hear the call Of the
East, and they never cease to look for
ward to the time when they shall re-
turn to it again.
Those who have once lived in China
are never satisfied to live anywhere
SAse. oootuluS duu lHSiHudllHS, tHe Id
talism Of the Chinese creeps upon
them, and they, too, learn to accept
things as they come. Other land
scapes lose their interest, the oldest
ruins of other climes seem cheap and
new, while the hustle and haste of Oc-
cidental life, with its harsh customs
and abrupt manners, bruise their spirit
and they long for the peace Of Cathay.