The farmer and mechanic. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 18??-19??, 1906-01-30

marrying when a young Miss turning
20. me askcd what / thought Of tous
~,,rr.te.| ns,. / tod her That depended
... -~...IaI things. If the lovers arc
.....4. IL good time, and don't care
-. marry, the longer they rcmdin
...., md carry on the counting pa
...., the better. as that will give
them something to think about ana
r.ruag4 keep them from getting Did
sag IIard-hcarted. so long as they can
..acac. / guess. said /. counting is about
cheap and as harmless an u
m44t as young people can engage in.
But the young Iady's question was
very indefinite. / suppose, however,
she wished me to express an opinion
rs to the length Of time a girl Oughl to
allow Il gentleman to visit her before
telling his business. If 50. / hardy
know how to answer. for men are SO
differently constituted that a general
rule without exceptions might WORK
I~jHastrOuSly in many cases. Some men.
i'm the matter of lovc-making. as in
business. have the gift Of laying plans
aud working them out just as smooth
~ as if they were working the sim
pIcSt sum in addition. while to others
love-. courtship and I~natrimony are as
complex fractions which thcy can t
understand.
of course girls. Of m~arriagcabIa
age have the right to that
men of manageable age, who visit
them two or three times. have a prop
o1ition to make: but all they can do
lu the matter is to watch and wait.
And this is the nOint, | on
~hjch the young lady desired oar
opinion. to wit: How long should Il
man visit Il girl before making a dec
IaratiOn | repeat, | cant answer; but
my idea is. that. if the girl is good
tooking mo has attractive manners.
and the fellow really means business
me viii let her know very early. the
state of his mind. and the desires and
purposes Wnich prompt his visits.
Young men are very polite. some
times, and are careful not to commit
themselves i'll too great haste. They
to have q good time with the girls,
though not really anxious TO marry.
Girls certainly nave II knOtty cases
to contend with. and / am astonishcd
that they don't make themselves very
diSagreeable over them.
But they generally manage to keep
sweet and look pretty: and if matters
DO not tur out as they ought. the
boys will never know it. They al
like to have beauX, and, as a matter
of curse, they cannot bar their doors,
as they doubtless would like to.
against Objectionable V~iSitants. lest
they subject themselves to uncharita-
bic criticisms. But [ am wandering
from the question.
70 be candid, / do not believe in a
long courtship for several reasons. IN
the first place, its Il waste of time. \
right smart clio can go to college,
graduate. study law and become 4
judge, while another fellow is travel
ing to and from his best girls home.
trying to make uD his mind and screw
no his courage to the point of asking
her if she viii marry him.
Many years AGO [ knew a country
copIc that hung fire, and though
nobody seemed to object to their mar
lying, they seemed to make no pro
2reSs. Two or three times a week the
Young fellow would go over and spend
The" evenings: and Sunday he spent Inc
whole day; and he and his Girl talked.
and talked, and talked: but some how
or other the wedding bell would not
rIng.ThuS the cOurtship went on from
year to year. until finally people
ceased to talk of the affair.". Twenty
wears went by and and the lovers
heads were turning gray: still they
were counting.
Finally. Il al in the neiehborhooc.
took it into his head to count un The
time the man had wasted in ahat
twenty years of cOurtship, and ne
worked it out in this way:
Three evenings q week, three hours
each evening equal nine hours. FIFTY
two weeks multiplied by nine make
f6S. which multiplied by 20 years
make $3.50 hours. equal to 800 days.
Added 10 which he spent 1.O40 Sun
days; making a grand total of 1870
days; equal to four years in that
rourtShiD and still not married. AS
long as the Civil War lasted.
In the next place long courtships.
4 general rule, are very dangerous
to the girls. If after a half dozen |
years spent in courtship, the fellow
happens to fall in love with another
girl the one he has been counting so
long finds herself on the ragged edge.
with no prospects, for all the BOYS
whom she might have strung on her
string are married, and, of course. !
the young bucks are all looking after
the younger girls. Then the fcrsakeu
SRI must set her sails for q refuge in
WidoWer's home, as a last resort.
Finally long courtsh:ps are DONOR
lIlzlng, for the reason that SO long
Il time has to be spent in deception. |
tor it must be acknowledged that
Will dissembIe. more or less. |
until the marriage is over.
some people contend tina parties |
ought not to marry until they become i
wen acquainted with each others
characteristics and temperamcnt3.
They forget That lovers try to hidr,
and generally do hide all their bad
The man who kills the liquor
perfume OF his breath. is. when talk
10 MS best girl, a Staunch temper |
anc" man. II makes her believe that /
ne mates the acCursed stuff more than
devil hates holy water.
And if some friend of the girl hap
pens to intimate that her Charlcy's
nos" Is turning permatureIv red. she
'J'f SHOWS its Il SANDER. because
= marley is a tetOtaIcr, for he said 50.
And how deIiciOusiy sweet is May
ANN when her beau comes. Her voice !
!s melody itself. And how neat she is
ih dress! How kind and loving to
mother and father. and how gently
ne speaks TO the brothers and sisters, !
farley just knows she's bound to be !
Election. Suppose he could have
4Et that harsh, ~disagreeabIe rcmark
.nt made to father or mother, Just
3D. ''" moments before! But he didn't
NOR viii he, if he should continue %
'.' there a whole year.
$40. there's no finding each other
"- while he counting is going 90;
..t l repeat, that Il long courtshiD is
I''1orIliZing. because it's a continual
'."1 of those little deccptiOns that
ways have been and always will b.
ltdcticed.
NdIrVinp is t1kino each otbo, r,r /