davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1906-04-12
Some Stories Told
In Cobbler'S Shop
Hans Hears Them From the Under
laker, Butcher, Plumber and
the Coal Man.

t.'f' '1t''' Af'fIt ~ lA'4.it- on ta-s NJ
~ TEAKING about human ingrat-
iiude," says der undertaken
one day when / vhas putting
some lifts on his heels. bat |
met nit Il case when first goes into
pccsness dot makes me feel sad yet
Il hat Il friend dot | belief yhIS der
squarest man on earth. He vhas so
honest dot if he borrows a match of
me he walks mile to pay it back. und
so truthful dot if he calls me a liar
have to believe him. | know he must
die some day, ind | promised him 20
per cent off der funeral. Well he
vhas coming to my place one day When
he keels over ind goes dead of heart
disease. Der ambulance man says it
vhas being so good dot kills him. |
run my hardest to tell his wife, una l
take full charge und after two days
hard work und feeling bad all der time
what YOU suppose happens"
Maybe you lose der job said.
NO. l don't, but | wish did Dot
man vhas only in a trance. He comes
to life und not only kicks der coffin all
to pieces, but finds fault because /
wasn't going to have eight white horses
draw der hearsc! l make him Il bill
and throw off 20 per cent, but he says
he won't pay und sues me for loss of
two days time while lying dead! Dot
learns me lesson, Hans. 1t vhas so
NIT me now dot l add on 20 per cent
NIT everybody, und if Teller won't
stay dead | have 4 damage suit against
him for one tousand dollar"
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1906-04-12
BUTCHER, YOU WAS A scOUNDPEL U.;D
A RUBBER."

body grateful to me? Not Il soul
don't be elected u Office or presented
nit a watch. ind der papers don't print
a picture OF my wife und say how
beautiful she vhas On der contrary,
Il man comes to me after six months
und says:
Butcher, you yhas a scoundrel una
rohbcrr
How vhas itT says.
You cut all der rind off my pork,
und don't have nothing to grease my
boots mit!'
Dot settles it nit me-" says der
butcher. Since dot time der public
have had bones und rind und meat all
mixed together, und now if l go out
to Il public meeting | am invited to
stand oop und tell how Columbus dis
covered America"
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1906-04-12

my church. tell you. Hans, it's dis
c0Iraging for any man to try TO do the
right thing. but more especially a
plumber. If the world keeps on using
me as it has, the worm will turn some
day-that is. some man will send for
me TO dig up the street in front of his
house ami thaw out his water pipe
and I'll send in 4 bill for a dollar and
half und sue him clear to der SUI
preme court if he don't pay
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1906-04-12
The story of the Coal Wan.

Il think it is generally believed
says der coal man who comes in for q
cement patch on his shoe, dot der coal
man vhas grasping und ayaricious und
dot lie makes Il ton OF coal out of
eighteen hOonercd pounds. | nave had
men tell me - my face after had de
liyered six tons of coal To 'em dot dey
don't belief it vhas over fife tons. one
time a mans brings back half ton of
slate und stones which he says he finds
in my anthracite una advises me to go
into der building trade. Maybe you
yourself don't belief yhas IN honest
man."
1t vhas hard 10 belief So says.
Thanks for your franlnesS. | Will
do ash mooch for you some day. You
don't belief l vhas honest. but let me
tell you leetle incident When starts
out in pcesness | max oop my mind to
be ash honest ash neffer Was. In Il
leetle time Il mans comes along uud
WANTS two tons of coal. | fill Got or
der, but when night comes on my clerk
breaks his leg Der pain arouscs his
conscience, und he tells me dot der two
tons vhas short by 800 pounds 1t vhas
raining una blowing but | bitches oop
my horse und buggy, und at II O'Clock
l goes to dot customer nit the 300
pounds in Il bag Wasn't dot honest,
Hans"
'Nhell, she looks honest"
"Of course she does, but What sort of
credit do l get? Der mans says he has
had der coal weighed. und she vhas
four hoOnered pounds over instead of
three hoonered pounds short und dot
must pay him 80 cents extra because
he shoyeled it into der cellar und lanes
his back! Say, do you hear of case
like dot:"
Il don't belief So
NO, you neffer did 1t set me to
thinking. 1t makes me believe dot it
don't pay to be honest und dot if |
don't give full weight it vhas shust
ash well. If humanity encourages a
man to be honest he vhas all right; if
she discouragcs him he Will be a
sharper" NJ. QUAD
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1906-04-12

Just Il word, Hans" says der butch
er as he gers his shoes half soled one
time. "Dcre yhas a time When I gif
everybody der VERY choicest cuts und
cut out all der bone. But vhaS any
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1906-04-12

Perkins got terribly big head
when he heard his novel was selling in
the hundred thousands"
yes. But he got over it all right
when he tried to collect the royalty
from his publishers. New York Life.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1906-04-12
SeieSS.

"Why don't you write something
originate"
whats the use:" asked the author.
If l do it will merely cause my
friends to ask me why l don't write
something Interesting" 49, Washington
Star
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1906-04-12
Way Tn.

Groceries, ma'am. this tea is 50
pound.
Mrs. Gamp-My goodness me. | sup
pose that's the high tea" l read about
in the society columns.-rhiladelphia
Press
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1906-04-12
4 Valid Eycuse

Il see Robinson is married again
married his first wife's sister,"
Yes. He said he didn't want to
have to break in another motherin-
law."-Judge
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1906-04-12

why do you object to al'bitration:"
whats the use?' rejoined Mr.. Dust
in StaX. 81 know I'm right before we
start. l don't need any third party to
tell me So
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1906-04-12
Ring OF.

The pretty little maid he loved
Worked at Il telephone
And often in her cozy home
The pair would sit alone.
Her lips he said were Cupid lines"
with love this youth was dizzy)
They kissed and kissed-but neither
growled
Because the lines were busy
New York Press.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1906-04-12

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g. Blu
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[51.
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reSSet
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p,,+
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The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1906-04-12

New
|r'eat
and
the
! how
pipe
b he
bf it
|,r to
~ in
that
take
said
/ he
IN in
|iOuS
|aunl
|lg.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1906-04-12

over
e?
lt day
|akfast
|rfOrIn
or the
he had
a mar
: aim
pore
lille o
house
III his
bow TO
@. Blu
( hell
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1906-04-12

|talalE
tlir
|lOntH
|lalQe +
I'd in +
date {
! de- T
mag T
b the T
moot (
In de /
pm Il
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for
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East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-01-01

coined BY parents who are rearing
families. II Is certainly not welcomed
by honest men who are not afraid of
law enforcement and who are willing
to take an equal chance for business
within the law and who seek no un-
due advantage from law violation.
The business interests of the city
are not dependent upon law violation
The city was founded with due re-
gard to the restrictions of society and
law. and why a public newspaper, cir
culating among respectable and law
loving people should continue to
council law violation, to belittle agi-
tation for law enforcement and to en-
courage disorder by trying to shield
men who seek to evade and break
laws wantonly Is mystery.
The law Violators are in the mlnori-
ty. They control but an Insignificant
part Of the business of the communi-
ty. A newspaper does not depend
upon this class for any portion of Its
support. And that the Tribune should
willingly ally itself with the law vio-
lators and become their spokesman,
advocate and defender. why it should
persist in belittling law enforcement,
why 1t should brand the demand for
hetter morals rs "harassing" the city,
and yet expect to stand as the repre-
sentative Of great party and be a
vital element in the life of the COM
munity. is enigmaical.
1t is not necessary to oppose decen-
cy In order to get business. Pendleton
Is not builded upon that plan. The
Tribune's stand would lead the pub
lie to believe that it is so builded. 1t
is not necessary to council law viola
ton in order to be supported by the
staunch business institutions of the
city. They are immeasurably above
such principle. The East Oregonlan
knows of no better way to begin the
New Year than by defending the city
and the community against the Trlb-
une's false teaehing.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-01-01
WESTERN PIONEERS.

would Got that we, their children,
were az theyi
Great-souled. brave-hearted and OF
dauntless will;
Ready to dare. responsive to the
still.
Compelling voice that called them
night and day
From this far West where sleeping
Greatness lay
Bidlng her time. Would God we
knew the thrill
That exluisitely tormented them,
until
They stood up strong and resolute to
obey.
God. make us like them, worthy OF
them; shake
Our souls with great desires: our
dull eyes set
On some high star whose splendid
light will wake
Al from our dreams, and guide US
from this fen
OF selfish case won by our fathers
sweat.
Oh lift us up--the West has need OF
-slla Hlgglnson.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-01-01
ORANG-oUTANG's APPENDIX.

An autopsy upon Miss Dooley, the
orang-outang, which died yesterday
at the Lincoln Park zoo, was helG
today, says a Chicago dispatch.
DR.. Clarence Wall, DIR. w. A. Ev.
ans, DR.. Byron Evans, DIR. William
Thompson and DR.. John j. Millard
the latter a veterinary surgeon, per.
formed the autopsy and learned much
of interest to the medical profession
When the post-mortem examination
was over, DR.. Wall said:
eve find that Miss Dooley died II
iliocolitis or. In other words, indiges-
ton, much the same as infants OF
the human family do. We found the
heart. lungs. stomach and other in
ternal organs to be identical with
those of human being.
'One remarkable thing is the find
ing of vermiform appendix six
inches in length. The examination
of the skull showed well developed
brains in the anterior. but there were
defects in the frontal lobes and con-
volutions, impeding reasoning power
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-01-01
Drowned Man Identified.

The coroners' inquest held over the
remains of the body found Tuesday
near Freedom on Salmon river, has
disclosed the fact that the dead man
is George Bennett, whose mysterious
disappearance from Freedom last
June was reported IN a Grangeville
dispatch to the Tribune. The inquest
was concluded this morning and the
remains were buried at Freedom. He
was identified by his clothing.
Bennett was a man about 33 years
OF age and was employed at farm
about a mile and a half above Free
dom. He had been in Freedom the
day he was last seen alive and sug-
gested to an acquaintance that he in
tended to take his life. Later in the
day he was seen near the river. His
disappearance was noted the next day
and a search was made for him. His
body when discovered Tuesday was
lying in an eddy near the highwater
line, showing that he had been
drowned during the flood stage OF the
river. He has no relatives in this
section. but it is understood an uncle,
Dr. O'Brien. resides In one of the Pu-
get sound cities.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-01-01
THE COWBOYS BEST FRIEND.

Farewell to the forty-five caliber
Colt
A cowardly weapon at best;
Too long 1t has had a tenacious "holt''
On the slummy cowboy of the West.
Nor has it been needed in twenty long
years.
In truth it is quite obsolete,
Except for the buffer and bully who
fears
The swashbuckling bunch of conceit
The tough Bowery boy with a big
cigarette.
And the six-shooter cowboy of war,
Were usually raised in the sums OF
the street.
And their stock iB about on a par.
There are college-bred cowboys-fine
gentlemen, too,-
And some who know nothing OF
books;
But manly and modest, big-hearted
and true.
And as clean as their own noun
tain brooks.
To these the old Colt is a souvenir
now;
And it hangs on the wall as look
At the wonderful change,-and I'm
hinking.-somehow
The cowboys best friend Is his
book.
Captain Jack Crawford in Success
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-01-01
Is AGITATION "UNWIsE."

In reviewing the conditions which
confront Pendleton at the beginning
Of the new year. the Morning Tribune
Of this city makes a statement which
makes plain its attitude toward the
laws of the state and city, and which
should be guide to law-loving people
in the future. The Tribune said yes
terday morning:
'OThe unwise agitation which has
harrassed the city for months has
subssded and IA not like
~ to be revived"
The agitation referred to has been
for the enforcement of the laws of
the state of Oregon and the ordi-
nances of the city of Pendletou.
Nothing more, nothing less. These
laws were passed by the legislature,
and have never been repealed and
are, consequently, considered to be
satisfactory to the people. No matter
for that, however, they are laws.
printed in the codes of the state and
IN the ordinances of the city, and as
such are as sacred as it is possible to
make a public document by legislative
action.
The Tribune says the agitation for
the enforcement of these laws has
been "unwise." It says that this agi-
tation has "harassed' the city. 1t at
tempts to create the impression that
the agitation has been detrimental
and disastrous. 1t b. therefore,
against the law. 1t believes in an
archy. It councils Iaw-breaking. 1t
stands for the law vfolator. 1t brands
law enforcement as "harassing" the
city.
Does the Tribune know where this
doctrine Will end? Does it know what
such doctrine means?
II 1t Is ''harassing" to enforce the
law against gambling. Is It not harass-
ing TO enforce the law against burg
Larry, Horse stealing, murder. train rob
berry, hold-ups. arson or rape7 There
= are no half-laws. A law Is either
hw or Il Is not lnw. II 1t Is crime
no break one law It Is crime tc
break another and all other laws
They are all laws as long as they art
on the statutes.
Hit Ia unwise to enforce laws, whI
pass them? Why have a legislature
why pay out vast sums of money fo
court and police expenses?
= The saloon interests and gambler
should not be allowed to monopoliz
q good thing. II law violation Is
good thing. Why not allow the burg
lara 10 get together and maintain Al
stgaalkaeon7 Why should the fire
bug, the train robber or the rapist b
80 vigorously prosecuted and othe
.crtmtnais escaped
The Tribune's logic Is not sound;
n not sensible: It is not demanded b
the intelligent business interests o
..ttle city; 1t Is not tolerated by a larg
majority of its own party and why
continues to mflict upon the youn
men Of the community the idea tina
law enforcement Is "harasslng" an
"unwise." is a wonder.
Such doctrine b certainly not vel
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-01-01
REX BUGGIEs.

REX BUGGIEs.
Are we'll built and they afford the
simplest. safest and most luxurious
means of conveyance for town OF
country use. Prices all in your favor.
When you buy a wagon it's tun
common business sense to look :oI
the vehicle that will give you the
most for your money.
WINONA WAGONS.
will prove an investment and not an
expense. They are reasonable 10
price, they cost little to maintain. are
honestly built, and will stand the
strain of a heavy load.
We look after the interests Of our
customers and they are protected by
a shop we'll equipped with up-to-dats
machinery.
Naa~lo po~e
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-01-01
TODAY.

Today is the life OF the present,
Tomorrow the death of the past;
To-day lights the highway of effort,
Tomorrow the fate-lines are cast.
Tides that go out In the morning
Forever roll on to the sea:
To-day Is the object before US,
Tomorrow whatever may be.
Arthur G.. Lewis.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-01-01
HOStetter'S
Stomach BitterS

You'll find 1t splendid for preventing
ChilIs, Cold and Pneumonia, also for
curing Indigestion, Dyspepsia, Cosiivr-
ness, Bloating and Malaria. Try 1t
today. also get free copy OF our 1906
Almanac Ssom your druggist.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-01-01
t++%%4++%4%+++4+

q A NEW YEARS GREED.
2 To do my work as best 1 may, I
= Rising to meet each dawuing I
. day
= With honest faith in human
love Z
. And sincere trust In One above. I
p To face what comes of woe or I
. grief
2 With courage won of my belief! .
= That what Is sent Is for my 4
= good
. If borne with patient hardihood. Z
3 To gentle be and tender. too. Z
. With human frailty and to do 4
. Whate'er can. though small 1t I
= be- 4
. To help my brother man to free {
. His nobler self unto the right. I
. And thus to clear his blinded I
= sight, 4
2 Never to fail IN charity. I
= Nor kindly given sympathy. I
. Never to question how or why. =
= But simply live-and simply die. =
. -Grace G.. Bostwick. I
. q = . 3 . 3 > , D = . = . . 4
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-01-01

The Pacific Caost company has or
dered of n Philadelphia firm a new
steel passenger steamer 400 feet long,
to ply between Seattle and San Fran
niann
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-01-01

A boy 1B years OF age shot three
times with a pistol at Baron Midem
governor OF Moscow. Seeing that
escape was impossible. the lad took
poison and died in a few moments.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-01-01

DIR. ID. c. Lazier, of Condor, has
been declared insane and taken to the
asylum. His mind has become upset
from the use of drugs.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-01-01
Walters FIGURING Mills

Capacity. 1bo barrels a day.
Flour exchanged for wheat.
Flour. Mil Feed. Chopped Essa
&C.. always on band.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-01-01
DAYS

Are very trying on one whose system
is all run down, bowels constipated
and blood impure. No wonder you
take cold so easily. Build up and for
tify tho system by taking
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-17
EACH STATE TO
HAVE A GUEST
SOUTH PASADENA METHoDIsTs
PLAN UNIQUE BANQUET
Tonight an Interstate Supper viii Be
Given, at Which Former Residents
of Different States Will Respond
With a Sentiment

South Pasadena Methodists will give
an interstate dinner Thursday evening
and for miles around church folks are
talking about the affair.
1t will be a big reunion of all adopted
sons and daughters of California, and
each one who attends will respond with
a three-minute greeting.
New Englanders will be seated at one
table, Mississippi valleyites at another,
southerners at another and so on. All
from one state will also sit side by side.
1t will be a huge geographically
divided family with a most tempting
menu before the guests.
The women of the church, which is on
Center street, planned the affair and
quickly won the cooperation of the
men. The pretty church, with its
roomy Kitchen and dining rooms, has
ideal facilities for such banquet, and
with the cosmopolitan population of
South Pasadena to draw from the pre-
liminary work was full of surprises.
Men and women, neighbors for
months and years, discovered to their
astonishment through the invitations
that people from their own home towns
dwelled within radius of few blocks
of them in their newly adopted Califor-
MIA. Others who had not been to
church services for weeks or longer
were entirely willing to respond to so
patriotic a call as saying kind word
for the home state.
The effects of the interstate banquet,
it is predicted will be far-reaching,
and the idea will be generally observed
not only among Methodists but among
cities everywhere as a means of uniting
the residents by geographical ties.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-17
Rlq tract Of teoo Acres

The Montebelo Heights company has
been incorporated with a capital of
$500, ,000 with Robert Marsh, j. w.
Vaughn, A. Scheicher, N. Murray, f. r.
Strong, A. H. Busch and f. II. Edwards
as directors. The company has ac-
quired 1900 acres of elevated land, lying
east of Boyle Heights and north Of the
proposed eastern extension of the
Stephenson avenue electric car line.
The tract is beyond the eastern limits
of the Ninth ward. Plans will be per-
fected for the early Improvements of
the land in high class manner. The
popularity of the Boyle Heights sec
ton as a residence district has at
tracted visitors in that direction, and
as all of the available acreage in the
Ninth ward has been plated and sold
it has become necessary to go beyond
the city limits to supply the persistent
demands of home seekers.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-17
GROWING business center

In addition to securing the general
offices of the Fruit Dispatch company.
formerly located in San Francisco. Los
Angeles is capturing other big institu
tions, and the end is not yet.
The New York Chronicle, an insur-
ance monthly, makes this announce
ment: "That the disaster of San Fran
cisco, with its resultant fear of a re-
currence Of the earthquake. will give
renewed impetus to the already rapid
development of Los Angeles as an in
dustrial center, there seems little doubt.
The growth of Los Angeles means the
growth of the insurance business. First
of the companies to consider Los An
geles too important a point to continue
longer as a sub-agency of San Fran
cisco was the American Bonding of
Baltimore. william ]. Unverzagt,
superintendent of agencies of the COM
pany, is in close touch with the in
surance situation on the Pacific coast
and is firm believer in the future of
Los Angeles. At the first opportunity
he established a general agency there,
appointing Fred S. Hughes, who had
represented the company at that point
for three years." Mr.. Hughes is well
known member of the Jonathan and
California clubs.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-17
INVITE ALL CONVENTIONS
Los Angeles Chamber of Commerce
Names Committee to Make
ARRANGEMENTS

The board Of directors at the regular
meeting yesterday afternoon admitted
the following as members of the cham
Der OF commerce: DIR. Elwood j.
Thorne and Il. Koth, manager of Cal
klns newspaper syndicate.
A communication was received from
the Los Angeles board OF horticulture
asking the board to indorse a request
to the department of agriculture to
scientifically investigate the use Of
cyanide In the destruction OF insects.
President Washburn was instructed
to appoint delegates to the TRANSMITS
sissippi Commercial congress to be held
IN Kansas City, November 20 and 49,
and to suggest questions for discussion
II was unanimously voted to ask all
political bodies to hold their conven-
tiOns In Los Angeles, and the president
was instructed to appoint committee
to take charge of making arrangements.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-17
Severe Cough
Consumption Threatened

Mrs. Mary Painter who was reduced
to a shadow and threatened with con-
sumption. IL restored to health and
strength by Duffy's Pure Malt Whiskey.
Bedridden, her husband could hardly
move from backache, is also speedily
cured and made as strong and sound as
ever.
1T is with great pleasure write to
tell you what think of Duffys Malt
Whiskey- l sincerely believe 1t Is the
grandest medicine ever made. 1 took a
cough this spring and 1t got so bad my
friends thought | had consumption. l
was as thin as a skeleton, had given
up, and could scarcely live. SO bought
two bottles OF Duffy's Malt Whiskey,
AS soon as began to take it my cough
lessened. so we sent for dozen bottles,
and am now as we'll as ever
my husband and have been taking
II all summer. He was down with
packache. till he could hardly move. and
now he is as we'll as anybody. am
stouter than I have been since we were
please send us another dozen bot
ties, as We cannot get along without
Mo, Sept. 90 1905.