The semi-weekly messenger. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1897-1908, 1906-03-30
soUTHERNERs TO THE FRONT
The Parker Ideia "A Presidential
Ticket and Cabinet Suggested.

-
"Mr. Treetop now that you nave
settled the question of hell holes, tell
me what you think Of this agitation
for a southern man for president. set
in motion By Judge Parker ar Char
lotte."
"Ah, you seem to have been read
ing the papers with more under
standing than usual, young a
And has anyone been named yet? You
see while | a looking down into
these hell holes | couldn't see anything
else for the time being. By the wa3. |
wish TO goodness that scrap the other
day had been somewhere in sight from
my tree, but it was hopelessly ou- of
my territory, and SO | missed it. We'll,
let us hope for the best. Who did you
say had been mentioned as the Parker
ticket"
You didn't give me d chance 10
answer. Mayor McNinch, of Char
lotte has nominated D. A. Tompkln2,
of Charlotte"
Il am afraid Mr.. Tompkins is too
good a business man ever to be elect
ed president of the United States.
When was a good business man made
president in the history of the coun-
try? No, he must be a politician, a
state saver preferably, an unselfisn
lover of the people, a hater of trusts
hat don't advertise, a man that has
the courage of his convictions, mat
holds himself personally responsible
for what he says and writes, with a
real bony backbone and a physical
bravery that would make the present
occupant of the White house look like
a kid. He must be able to handle
congress-, spank the leaders if they
won't do what he wants and never
let them bamfoozle him on fake rail-
road rate and statehood bills so as to
make him forget all about tariff reVl-
sion. There can Ee no real question
about the man that ought to be nam
ed to head the Parker layout. It is
Josephus Daniels"
"How about vice PRESIDENT"
THAT will be a little more difficult.
He must be a man who is friendly
with the president and not at all ram
FUNCTIONS. He must be prominent
enough to bring votes and yet wis"
enough to stay in the background. He
must be windshield, run and not be
seen, talk and not be heard. | nave
him, Cyrus B. Watson. Daniels and
Watson, that's my southern ticket
Now suppose you name the caDlneI
while you are at it
"Well, for secretary OF state. or
course you have to have a very dlplo-
matte man. He's to be head Of the en-
tire diplomatic corps Of the country
a-1 - lo,oJ1o oil on fnraion r~QI6tJOnS
II takes a deft touch and a strong
one. an iron hand under the velvet
glove. a man that ever looks TO the
future, that makes friends and knows
how to use them to the best advantage.
It's a hard position to I'll, out us
easy to pick the man, John >. CuE-
ingham.
"For. secretary OF war we will have
to find a man familiar with war ana
the implements of war, who KNOWS
all about the handling OF troops, VINO
can deliver lectures n illustrated
reDrimands whenever necessary, very
fluent of speech, fond OF children, VINO
knows all about outlandish places III
Panama. Frederick A. Olds is fae
man. -
.'For secretary of the navy mus
be found a man who knows all
water and boats and the naval acao-
emy. although the last qualification IS
less important thar the others. ~
Glen Williams, of course.
'For secretary Of commerce n Id
hor and labor organizations, an unFe-
mifting and ~tireless worker for botn
the interests of the laboring man ana
the captain of industry. VINO else puI
H. B. Warner.
.sFor secretary of the interior a man
ought to be taken from the opposing
marty as an original stroke OF polltl-
cal genius and to show the people
that their welfare alone is the thing
he considered, and not mere party oll-
Call Marion Butler. II
would be a gracious thing to DO 1or
he sake of auld land syne. For was
NOT nv candidate for president one
time the true friend of Marion Butler
when the latter was a popullst ana
Iosonh,,s wanted the democrats To
nsLa common cause with them. Hut
the republicans got ahead OF him that
trip
For secretary of agriculture, natur-
aiiv the president would loo to some
prominent and successful FARMER oie
who could handle great problems IKE
hat of cotton statistics, giving ore
hand to tie one gallus man. the otner
70 wall street, and keep both
dashing tneir feet against stones r;
p Arendell comes to my u'lnu
strafghtway. oro
For secretary of the treasury mere
must be a financier Of national iepu-
| tation. Here l fall down, Tor I've Ill
ready named him for secretary OF az
riculture. l confess I'm stun.peo. =,
can:r think of anybody else for the
| ~1reasurer's portfolio.
AS to private secretary the presiaene
would be apt to appoint a man VINO
vas we'll known. He ought to be per
sonally handsome enough to make Air
tIneh look like thirty cents. He snoulo
nave had some experience as a private
-ecratarv and have been much IN lne