The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1906-08-01

0OO0s
people will deny that he is a profess
sional. There could he no more deadly
insult to an elevator boy than to stop
him on the street and ask him IL he is
out Of a Job"
If the profession Of running an ele-
vator ever M to be looked upon
with contempt and If the elevators
themselves are yer removed from all
buildings and the tenants compelled to
walk the boys themselves will have
been to blame for it. Taking my own
experience and the Investigations l
have made during the last year, l feel
It a duty to sound a note of warning.
What the average elevator boy has
got to look out for and steel his heart
against is falling in love with the Ste
nographer and the typist. Every sky.
scraper holds from Ave to twenty Of
them, and the first thing they do is to
make friends with the young gentle
mar who uns the elevator. They want
his information. They want his advice.
They want his candy and popcorn.
l was warned when l secured my
first engagement to beware Of the ste-
nographers and typists. l was told
that they had soft, sleek and insidious
ways. The hoy whose place l took
sat down with tears in his eyes and
said to me:
"Sammis. they will smile, they will
giggle, they will firt, they will sigh.
they will call you Bobby and pile on
the soft soap, but their ways are the
ways of the deceiver. When your for.
hume is rome they will throw you away
like an old shoe"
Two weeks later, despite this warn
ing, l was in love with the golden
haired typist in room PAS. I was call
ing her "Goldie" and she was calling
me 'Ducky." l was an innocent heart
ed boy. and how could l tell her that
her hair was bleached and that she
was working me for lunches and thea
ter tickets?
I wanted to die for Goldie.
wanted to ponr all my wealth into
her lap.
I wanted to knock the head off old
Saunders for winking at her. She was
In my thoughts by day and in my
dreams 10y night.
bought her candy. l paid for her
lunches. l sent her bouquets. l went
hungry in order that she might have
street car fare. We were as good as
engaged for two weeks. and l was
wondering whether we should take in
Florida or Niagara falls on our bridal
tour when the blow fell. The agent of
the building had been keeping tab on
me, and he had found me careless and
Indifferent to the lives of my passen-
gers.
"Sammis," said he. ''your elevator
wabbles. You bring up with a jerk.
You run past the sixth floor. You
come down with a bang. You scare the
old maid on the seventh floor, and you
cause the fat mar on the eleventh to
use cuss words. You are in love. 1t
always acts this way. Choose between
your engagement and Goldie."
II scOrn your engagement, sir!.' was
my heroic reply. and l went up to see
Goldie and ask her il she wanted to
i've out at Bensonhurst when we were
wed. She looked me straight in the
eyes and replied:
"Bobbie. you have made a mistake in
the room. The girl who is dying to
wed you is four doors farther down
the hall"
Through a pull with an alderman l
obtained another engagement. The
agent Of the building seemed favorably
impressed with me. but he thought fit
to say:
young man. We want no nonsense
here. Running an elevator is business.
There are no less than four trusts max
ing their headquarters in this building.
and, knowing how much the people
love them. they are taking no chances.
Beware Of the typists. Flee from the