davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13
HOW THE CONDUCTOR
WAS TOUCHED.

This tale which is going the
rounds of the Union railroad en-
ployes. 1t has been repeated so many
times by the new conductor, who is
its hero, that it may have grown some
what in the telling. Il was making
my last trip up Jerome avenue one
night" he said, when a nice looking
young fellow in long raglan coat got
aboard and stood on the back plat
form with me. Lonely up here he
says. Yes says |, one of our con-
ductors got held up here last year,
and cleaned out of every cent, and not
long ago another had his pocket pick
ed Well says he, I never could
understand how them fellows can
work it. l bet none of EMIL ever get
my ticker. Still, / suppose some of
EN- are pretty slick Yes, says,
some of 'em probably are Then we
talked about other things. After
while we got to a cross street, and
the young fellow told me to stop. Just
as l got off the car he says, Here's
your money! and handed me hand
full of nickels. I didn't need the
money, but thought you was getting
a little too chesty!' He was away in
the woods before could think of any
thing to do, but when I looked in my
vest pocket found--well you see /
amt wearing a watch now" New
York Post.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13
HE WAS SORRY.

Prof. John A. De Camp, of Williams
College, when student at college
roomed in the house of a. lady who
had very bright little boy about two
years old whose name was Dewey.
He had just learned to talk, and Mr..
De Camp was very proud of him, tells
the Chicago Inter-Ocean.
One day when Mr.. De Camp was
teasing him he shocked his mother by
saying: Keep your old mouth shut!''
She took him aside and told him he
must apologize to Mr.. De Camp and
say he was very sorry he said such a
naughty thing.
That night Mr.. De Camp had COM
pany in his room when the patter of
Dewey's baby feet was heard in the
hall. Then sad little voice in the
doorway said: us sorry"
why, what are you sorry for,
Dewey" Mr.. De Camp asked.
IT'S sorry" said Dewey, shat you
don't keep your old mouth shut"
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13
PUT 1T TO A GOOD USE.

| A story is told of how the late ex
Gov. Joseph A. Gilmore of New Hamp
shire, when he was superintendent OF
the Concord and Claremont railroad
once wrote letter to one of his sec
ton bosses who had done something
to displease him. All the man could
make out was the date and Superin.
tendent Gilmore's signature, says the
Boston Herald.
Some time afterward, being in Con
cord, the man went to call on the
superintendent at his Office.
Hello, John, how do you do?" said
Mr. Gilmore. well, what are you
doing now?"
why, I'm up there at the same
place on the same section, Mr.. Gil
MORE" said John.
What" said Mr.. Gilmore; didn't
you get letter from me?" naming
the date.
Eyes, SIR"
We'll, didn't you know that that
was letter of DISMISSAL"
Letter of DISMISSAL" cried the as
tonished John. mo! I couldn't make
it out, except that it was from head
quarters and sigued by you, sir. But
after some study concluded it was
pass. AS none of the conductors on
the road could read it, they all ac-
cepted my statement that it was
pass from Mr.. Gilmore, and / have
been riding ON it ever since"
John kept his place on the section
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13
A BIG SUCCESS.
The Vanderbilt GIee Club Delights
Large Crowd at Hay Long Col
lege.

Last Saturday evening Will long be
pleasantly remembered by many of Mt.
Peasants music.loveIs. who were
fortunate enough to have the Wander.
bilt Glee Club at Hay Long College
at that time. under the able director
ship of Mr.. Cbas. Washburn.
The entertainers were met at the
depot by bevy of the fair sex, who
escorted them to the Stewart House
flr a delightful menu which had been
especially prepared for them. After
the repast they repaired to Hay Long
College, where they awaited the
coming one of the largest and most
representative AUDIENCES assembled In
that auditorium in many months.
From beginning TO end 1t was one
long feast of melody. the encores al
mosts equaling in number the original
numbers on the program.
Tha receipts from the sale of tickets
were something over $500. three
fourths of which was received by the
Club. The other one-tourth, together
with the money raised from the ad-
vertising on the program. went to the
Church Workers Society and in
amount will net a little over $40. 90.
After the concert the visiting vocsl-
lists were rendered a reception at the
Tierson House. where tempting re-
fIeshments awaited them. 1t was
near the wee small hours of the
night before the reception was over.
The boys left Sunday morning on
the eight O'CLOCK train for Nashville,
leaving many new as well as old
friends behind them.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13

her grandmother, Mrs. w. A. Elem
ing.
Miss Jean Dobbins has returned to
Columbia after a visit to Mrs. John
E'rierson.
Mrs. Sallie Simms has returned to
Lawrenceburg after a visit to her
brother, Mr.. j. E. Anderson, and fam
lily here.
Mrs. G. l. Afford and children have
returned from visit to relatives in
Lawreneeburg.
Mrs. Moses Lazarus has returned
to her home in Columbia after a visit
to her sister, Mrs. M. Rosenthal.
Mrs. Joe Anderson spent Sunday
with his brother, Mr.. ]. E. Anderson.
Mrs. w. A. Voss, of Columbia, is
visiting her daughter. Mrs. W. J. Grit
fin.
Mrs. Thos. Holloway spent Sunday
with relatives at Summertown.
Misses Helen McMillen and May
Stewart visited Columbia friends Sat-
urday.
Mrs. Laura Simpson visited her
brother, Mr.. Tom Simpson, in Column
bia Sunday.
Miss Jessie Bostick spent Saturday
in Columbia.
Mr. e. M. Sowell spent Sunday with
his sister in Columbia.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13
q QUOTATIONS PHOSPHATE Q
q ROCK. Q
o r. o. B. Cars Mt. Pleasant. 0
o Corrected Every Monday. Q
mnnMANAa0RNONaoN0aS0N00OGc

In Carload Let's. Guaranteed Analysis
Export Is, 3 to a.. % $500 to $5.2E
Domestic IS. 49,. % $4.25 to $4.5C
Domestic IS, SIS. .@$S.75 to $4.OC
Domestis 70, 6h-3. @$S.OO to $3.50
Ground rock, 6S to 70 per cent, in
bulk. ......... $3.50 to $500
Ground rock, GO to 70 per cent, in
bags. $3.50 to $4.9O
Ground rock, 60 to IS per cent, in
bulk. $3.50 to $2.65
Ground rock, 60 to Go per cent, in
bags. ............$ 3.40 to $3.50
Ground rock shipped in bulk, add
loo per car for paper lining.
Markets strong. Shipments are
somewhat improved on account of an
Increase in the supply of cars.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13
A QUESTION OF LANGUAGE.

A prominent Boston liquor dealer
had a coachman whose north of Ire
land brogue greatly displeased him
as he came from another section OF
the Emerald Isle and was ever ready
to correct the deficiencies in the
speech of his servant, according to
the Boston Herald
One morning the coachman, address
ing his employer, said: Il want new
whop (whip).'
Disdainfully gazing at the coach
man, the boss retorted: For hivin's
sake, mon, don't say 'whop.' Can't
you say 'fip?"
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13

Tn big washer at the Blue Grass
Company's plant is in full operation
now, after few weeks stsn5stin or
account Of the scarcity of labor.
Among the vast amount of ma
hinery being purchased by the Mt.
Pleasant Fertilizer Co which is ar
rlvIng now, several motors have been
received which signifies that the COM
pany will furnish much of the neces-
sary power and light with their own
electric plant.
Miss Minnie McMuIray, of Ettaton.
hes accepted position with Messrs.
Coble, Garrett q Co.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13

But when she got there the cupboard
was bare,
And SO the poor dog got none"
M. Goose.
Now while white-hot wrath was the
aftermath of our heroine's fruit
less quest,
And she cried: II will smash these
meat kings rash, and will give all
packers no rest;
will camp on their trail, till they
writhe and wall and the air is
filled with their groans-
Till my cupboard is crammed and nv
purse is damned with all kinds
and conditions of bones"
So she sat her down in study, brown.
and she wrote for the magazines:
On the men who pack she made at
tack, on account of the pork in
their bias;
She declared all meat was unfit tn
eat, and that prices were high to
be sure;
And, the climax to crown, she billed
the whole town for Lawsonesoue
lecture tour.
What's this-a joker" cried the pack.
. er folk. "or a bundle of old wo-
mans les?"
But at last, as she planned, the men
rho canned made their offers to
compromise;
II shed make no fuss 'gainst the oc-
topus, said these moneyed men.
all a-quake.
They'd see that her pup was each dav
filled up with choicest porterhouse
steak.
So In modern days naught but words
OF praise can be found in Dame
Hubbard's lines,
For she grinds out verse that could
not be worse for the packers
street car signs;
And her dog has grown stout, and has
canine govt, since his mistress,
old and gray,
Filled her purse with dust by burst
ing a trust in an up-to-date hold
up way.
Denver Republican.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13
PERSONALS.

Mrs Mollie Reese, of Spring Hill,
Us the guest ct her daughter, Mrs
Geo. Jones.
Mrs. W. D. Strayhorn spent Thurs.
day in Columbia.
Mrs. Jno. Coleburn has returned
from Nashville.
Mrs. Chas Gilman spent Thursday
in Columbia.
Mrs. Russell Ray visited: friends In
Columbia Thursday.
Mrs. J. p. Foxnll, of Columbia, has
been the guest of her sister. Mrs.
Sandy recently.
Mrs. j. X. Or, of Columbia, visited
Mrs. J. ]. Jones on South Main street
Thursday.
Mrs. F. NJ. Ricketts, and daughter,
Fannie returned Thursday from Flor
6nce, Ala. where she has been for
several days.
Miss. Maud Matthews, of Sunnyside,
is the guest of Miss Mary Estes.
AT. A. z. SoweIl, of Bessemer, Ala,
is visiting friends near Atwood.
Mr.. Fl. B. McCauley. who has been
the guest of bis brother ard sister,
Hon. and Mrs. E. b. Rayburn, re-
turned TO his home in PoItageville.
NO.. Thursday.
Mrs. Sallie simms of LawIenceburg,
IL the guest of her brother, MIR. J. +.
Anderson.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13
A HARD HITTER.

Senator Foraker, in discussing a
rather unfair attack that one states
man had made upon another, said:
This reminds me of the young man
from the country who went to New
York to take course of boxing les.
sons.
He chose for his instructor a no.
tably hard-hitting heavyweight. The
heavy weight said to him, as the first
lesson began:
F" Now, ! may hurt you little, but
you mustn't mind. And you, in return,
hit me just as hard as you can. Don't
be afraid. / shan't bother
And he smiled maliciously.
And the malicious smile still ling
cred on his lips as--bang-with a
crashing blow on the jaw the heavy
weight went down.
He rose painfully.
That was soaker you gave ri
and no mistake he said; but, by t..
way, what it that in your gloves?
oh, it's only horseshoe, said the
pupil, chuckling. I just put it there
for luck kansas City Journal.
Subscribe for the Herald.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13
WOMAN THE scAPEcoAT.

A twentieth century woman writes
letter to the New York Times from
which the following interesting ex-
tract is made.
From the days of Adam woman has
been the worlds pet scapegoat, on
through the ages to John of Salisbury,
who quoted the so-called Fathers" in
hurting all the opprobrious epithets
possible against the sex to urge men
to celibacy, down to DIR. Peters, with
his good intentions but illogical stand
ing ground. That it is illogical is not
his fault, but is due to the 'cherche
la femme" doctrine, which is as per-
nicious as false, and which has sent
more men to bad than any other one
false doctrine.
The world will not reach it's highest
civilization untrammeled in using the
talents (mentaD with which God has
endowed them, or while the moral
standard of the male portion of the
human race remains low.
Here's to the arrival of civilization
which will consider,
Profanity, drunkenness and all i'm
purity
AS reprehensible and obnoxious in
men,
AS they are now considered
ReprehensibIe and obnoxious in
women.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13

Nj. and Mis-. A. s. Ewing and fam
lily left Friday to reside with daugh-
ter in Louisville.
Mr.. 6. j, Mankin has returned from
a business tip to Athens, Ala.
| Mr.. Jas. H. Ward visited friends in
Columbia Friday.
Mrs. John Weaver has returned from
visit to her daughter, Mrs. W. =.
Hopkins at Roc koale.
Mrs. Walter Smith is the guest OF
Mrs Harvey Wilson.
Miss Dixie Packard, of Terry, is the
guest of Miss. Mary Estes.
Miss Annie Mai Irwin will visit
friends in Columbia next week.
Mrs, Maud Burns, of Columbia, is
the guest of Mrs JAS A. English, who
has been quite ill, but is now much
improved.
Mr.sand Mrs. ]. NJ. Chafin have re-
turned from ne Lynnville.
Mrs. Garth Brockman has returned
to her home at St. Bethlehem. after
visit Of several days to her brother,
MI. E. +. Ligon, who has been very
sick for some time.
Mrs. T. M. Hall has returned from
Cornersville, sswhere she has been visit
ing for several days.
Mrs. Jennie Goodman, of Duck
River Station. together with three
children, are the guests Of Mr.. and
Mrs. W. ]. Mcdonald and Will be here
for-.several days.
Mrs. Humphrey and Miss Jennie
Conner spent Friday IN Columbia.
Mrs. Moses Lazarus and children are
the guests of Mrs. NJ. Rosenthai.
Miss Kittie Stewart spent Friday. in
Columbia.
Miss Mona Hill, with her friend
Miss Lou Willie Porter, are here from
Yards to spend over Sunday with Mr..
and Mrs. J. s. Hill.
Mr.. Robt. Stewart has been here
several days, the guest of Mr.. and
Mrs. N. B. Stewart.
Mr.. and Mrs. j. E. Colvert, ST., of
arrived Saturday and are
the guests of their son and daughter.
Nj. and Mrs. Chas, Colvert.
Mr.. Frank Parks. Of Nashville, Wis
tied friends here Sunday.
Miss Nell Weaver visited her sister,
Mrs. W. G. Hopkins at Rockdale, Sat-
urday.
Mr.. Ernest HARLAN returned Monday
to Vanderbilt.
Mr.. and Mrs. W. C. Hopkins visited
The latte:' IS parents, MIR. and Mrs. Jno.
Weaver Sunday afternoon.
Miss Lizzie Shields, of Columbus
vas the guest of Miss Charlotte Hen
ierson at the College home Saturday
ind Sunday.
Prof. and Mrs. Frank Williams, of
Elkton, were the guests OF Prof and
Mrs. A. Bostlck Saturday and Sun.
lay and took IN the concert at Hay
long College Saturday evening.
MI. X. q. Patterson former mem
Ter of the faculty at Hay Long Col
ege, now Vanderbilt student and a
member of the v. q. c.. spent Sunday
ERE, the guest of friends.
Mrs. Chas Gilman was in Columbia
saturday &
Miss Addie Rainey has returned to !.
er home in Columbia after visit to
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13

The Church Workers will iuaugurate
another candy kitchen at DR.. Ander-
sons drug store and expect to be able
to supply the demand for decorated
easter eggs. The profits go into the
organ fund.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13

The Kings Daughters Circle will
meet Friday afternoon with Mrs. W.
Y. Wilson. This being the occasion
for the election of officers full attend.
ance is urgently requested
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13
SOCIAL.

Miss Mary Estes entertained in
honor of Miss Maud burns, of Colum-
bia and her guest Miss Maud Mat
tbews. at the Estes home Friday even
ing.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13

And it isn't always the biggest horn
that destroys the most silence.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13
SICK.

Mrs. L, L. Frierson is quite Ill at
her home at the Frierson House.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13

Rev. ]. P. McFerrin, Presiding Ed
er of the M. E. Church, of this district
was here last week.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13
RELIGIOUS.

Regular reading services at the
Church of the Holy Cross Sunday
morning at IL o'clock as usual.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13

Rev. T. r. Curtis preached as usual
at the Methodist Church Sunday morn
ing and evening to apreciative aud
fences. The text at the morning SER
vice was John, LIST chapter and 4th
verse.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13

Rev. A. s. Allen preached Sunda!
morning at the Presbyterian Church
from Eph, list chapter and 9Th verse
and at 1880 p. M, to attentive aud
fences.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13

Subscriptions received at this office
Cor both daily and weekly Herald.
Telephones, Bell 127. Citizens AZ.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13
THE FURTHER ADVENTURES OF
MOTHER HUBBARD.

But when she got there the cupboard
was bare,
And SO the poor dog got none"
M. Goose.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1906-04-13
OFFICE,

This department Is devoted eACIu-
sively to the interest of Mt. Pleasant
and adjacent territory. Advertising
rates made known on application. Job
printing executed promptly and at rea'
sonable rates. News items of interest
will be thankfully received.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-03-28

signed by both the pupil and one of
the parents, or the guardian. then
either mailed or brought to The Herald
office before Saturday, March 81, 1906
This certificate will be printed in every
edition of The Daily Herald during the
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ders for early delivery of stereoscopes
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aid by filing out the order blank upon
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Fill out the blank by signing in the
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Los Angeles herald., 1906-03-28

the cost will come within the reach of
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nifty an intention of taking The Daily
Herald for six consecutive months will
be furnished an improved 1906 stereo-
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This extraordinary inducement should
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The Herald tour around the world
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During the past week The Herald
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Having already published the In
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Coupons for Boys and Girls
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Los Angeles herald., 1906-03-28
cERTtF1C ATEs MAY BE DELIVERED PERSON BY MAIL
OFFICE

for the old world is then made, arriv-
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torical interest are then visited in each
of the foreign civilized countries, such
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Russia. A short pilgrimage is then
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to Egypt, the land of the Pharaohs.
South Africa is touched. then the
Orient Is visited. viewing the wonders
of Japan and the Philippine Islands,
Hawaii and the United States posses
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via South America and Mexico.
This tour will require thirty-three
weeks to conclude, visiting three points
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The descriptive feature of each view
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