The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1906-12-22

She Con shipboard) lis the moon up
dear7 He-If 1t isn't it's lonesome =
Exchange.
; Madam-Have you had experience7
Cook-I've had tin places this MONTH.
Harper's Bazaar.
Tommy-Pop, what Is fret-workr |
Tommy's Pop-Wrinkles, my SON.
Philadelphia Record.
She-So you have had a great many |
thrilling escapes? He-Yes-I am still !
a bachelor.-Detrolt Free Press.
"Is he criminal or a corporation
llawyer?" Both. He's a criminal cor
,poration lawyer. News.
Ethel-How long have the Newly
riches been in society2 Bob-From the
way they play golf should judge about
two days-Judge.
Bacon-She says she is % years old.
Egbert-Well, she looks as If she
would say she was about that old
Yonkers Statesman.
Tommy-How do girls spend their
time? Jimmy-Trying to make little
boys stop asking questions and big
boys begin.-Exchange.
Medium see a large dark obstacle
rising suddenly in your way. Railroad
Magnate-I guess that's my coal stock.
], baltimore American.
Life is so uncertain" she said. II
: know it." he replied, lets get married.
One Of us may die within few years"
Chicago Record Herald.
4 "De man dat nurses unreasonable
hopes" said Uncle Eben,s may be fool
/ ish. but amt SO foolish as de one dat
i nurses vain regrets" ashington
Star.
Il see, Katie, that New York is to
have one policeman to every 521 inhab-
z itants," said the lady of the house
!: "Well, ma'am, I've got mine." was
II Katles reply.-Yonkers Statesman.
70 He-Do you remember the night
asked you to marry me? She-Yes
dear. He-For a whole hour we sal
there, and not word did you speak
y All, that was the happiest hour Of my
life.-Exchange.
90 II would deem 1t a great favor i
you would give me a little writeup,
said the poet to the editor. Nothing
would please me more" replied the edit
or. when do you contemplate dying
le Milwaukee Sentinel.
"You must change this ending" sal,
r the theatrical manager; 81 want a pla,
I'd that ends happily. "All right" replies
the obliging dramatist; "I'll have m
hero and heroine divorced in the las
act."-Philadelphi Record.
h. Not the Kind He Wanted.-A smaI
Id young fellow called out to farme
. ne who was sowing seed in his field, 1--WE
ed done, old fellow, you SOW; reap th
Sc fruits" maybe you WILL" said til
~ farmer, 'for I'm sowing hemp"
is, Grandfather enthusiastically )-Sa,
re Willie, don't you want to go through
he toy shop with me this afternoon and %
all the pretty things? Willie (indiffe
=, y emily Pm willing to, pop, II you wi
nv get any pleasure out of lt.-Life.
MI JONES, sulu Lhc OluS0 wy
got ter get off dis afternoon. Me graz
mother Is dyin'." "I've something 4
In you to do to-day, Johnnie" said n
Jones "but you may go at O'Clock
his Jaw! wot good is 4 o'clockT"-Judge.
News Editor-Here's cable fro
ns Constantinople saying the Sultan's pri
MT, cipal amusement Is soaring his wiv
ou- Into Ats Managing Editor-Well, he'
1t "a Harem- Scarem Fellow" and r.
1t In the Joke column.-Philadelph
Record
"You say you wouldn't like to 9
outf" exclaimed the prison visit
"Why, I thought you were in for lif'
rs: "Oh, worse than that, ma'am," repli
out the convict. "I'm in for double Ii
lis. I've got two wives waiting outside. u
Inv Philadelphia Ledger.
o First Girl-What are you watt
'u Tor? why don't you finish your let
.s. to Ella3 Second Girl don't KIN
~. whether to say Ever yours with tru
ma. love-" or simply yours afrectionatel
,os. You see, l can't endure Ella thi
,b. she's detestable !-Tit-Bits.
ION. Gracie-Oh, Mr.. Nocoyne, how low
'liei Of you to bring me these beauti
new roses. How sweet they are, and b
freshi 1 do believe there Is Iii
,ox. dew on them yet! Mr.. Nocoyn'