Arizona republican. [volume] (Phoenix, Ariz.) 1890-1930, 1906-12-09
Mr.. DooLEY ON
me Young Friend Count
Boney's Love Affair"
r. r..
BY =. p. dunno

I accumylatin' a modest fortune whin
| tn tax collector come ar-round. II
was almost, ye might say. blushing at
thin times. He was a poplar man
| His picture was printed often in tn
papers annie was sometimes chased
| firm his office to his home be his fel
low-citizens. He was a great rail-
road man. Not that he knew anything
! about a railroad thrain firm firm an
engine to sellin' peanuts, but. Hin
messy. he was, as me frind Jim Hill
wud say, tn conthrollin' spirit iv wan
iv thin great agents of civilization
that binds in bands of steel tn East
an West so tight that they can't even
| squeal an gives employment to thou
| sands of men like engineers. firemen,
lobbyists switchmen, joodicyary. leg
islachures, lab'rers, an Numbers Nv
Coroner's juries. He arly see the
Power iv tn Press. an instead iv
larnin' to lie a piston rod he studied
printin' an become so good at it that
he had a press in his back Office where
he cud be seen amy day or night in
his shirt sleeves r-runin' of his IA
write authors-Erie. Wabash. an Mis-
soury Pacific. They were the frs;
colored comic supplements, and they
were very daughable.
"But tn time come whin tn press was
stilled an tn skillful hand that steered
it moved no more. The financier was
at rest, an has been so liver since on
less he has reehd iv what happened to
his money.
"Tord this charming fortune our dis
tracted lover cast his eyes. He had no
sooner looked over tn records Nv tn
Probate Coort thin a mad passion seiz-
ed him Day be day he cud be seen
haunting tn Stock Exchange. pale an
hollow-eyed. He had tn barber rum
pie his hair with hot irons. At nigh.
he stood outside tn safety deposit
vaults playin' on a guitar an serenadin'
tn securities. Fin'lly he cud stand ii
throbbings of that fond heart or soothe
ayether his own or his boardin' house
keepers fury. With tn impetchuseness
iv his race he threw himsilf at tn feet
OF tn simple American fortune. BE
mine. he said. An it was. Tn for
tune too tn Count
81 well raymimber tn weddin'. l.
was enough to make we cry. TIL church
York. tn proud old rayjeem. says tn
pa-apers. that has ruled tn wurruld
iv fashion since the repeal iv tn Sher-
man act TIL arrystocracy were separ-
ated from tn vulgar be ropes iv purls.
A HISTORIAN ~ tn Press estimated that
nine hundred an eighty-three millyon
dollars worth iv diamonds reflected
back tn hues iv tn stained glass win
dows An amid wild cheers an much
bettin' on how long ii wud last, tn clar-
gymen accepted tn satisfactorily an
certyfied check that united tn oldest
an haughtiest line in France with wan
iy tn newest an humblest fortunes iv
America.
An now it's all over. The bloom is
off tn rose TIL romance has turned
into a trajeedy. How did 1t happen,
says We I'll niver tell We. though 1
know. Ye're a rayspfctaole marrid man
an It's not FIR tn likes iv We to pry
into tn domestic lives iv tn rich an
tn nobly BORN. l will say on'y this.
that firm readin' tn pa-apers I've made
up me mind that tn Count made love
to tn alphabet. He did. I say he did.
It's here in tn pa-aper in red an white,
MdOaule A. Maudiut ID, hoNaihN -
tn whole alphybet firm A to u. If l
cud joke on such a subject l might tell
We he was in love with Madame Al
An now he's lost his job. Tn sign Nv
a noble house has been taken down
an painted out What is left iv tn
fortunes has shook him. He's still In
love. mind We. a tender heart like that
is liver faithful. no matther what hap
pens to tn object iv its affections, an
tn honest Counts heart wud throb to-
day at tn sight iv a little small change.
He still stands around outside tn bank
singin' madrigals an askin to be taken
back. But all tn. romance is out iv 1t
rr tn Fortune. The Fortune has got
a divorce.
"An' there ye ar-re. Isn't that tn
sad story?'
81 think II sarves thin both right,
said Mr.. Hennessy. whats an Amer
lean girl doin' to marry wan Nv thin
Dagoes. Tn money was made over
here. an it shud stay here. I'm agin
all these things Our girls ought TO
marry good straight American young
men,"
They do" said Dooley. $50 long as
papa is poor. But whin tn old gintle-
man has ACCUMULATED q bank account
that makes him tn subject iv CONVEX
sation in the Grand Jury. tn lady has
got to choose between those that VIII