New-York tribune., 1906-08-08
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

A collector OF evidence the subject maintains
learnedly the golf ball is the most perverse Of
human institutions Here is list OF strange Hes
noted by a follower of the ancient game:
In another players pocket, where II had dropped
after travelling two hundred yards; in a cows
mouth; on the roof of a clubhouse; behind the
glass protecting painting hanging on cottage
walk in a clump of daisies, which 1t so resembied
that II was not found for an hour
When it fell In the cows mouth the frightened
animal gaIIoped ZIG yards the hole and then
restored the ball it's owner He promptly
claimed TO have driven It sH yards and the right
10 play it from where IL lay.
Drusgist-Try It again. little What was 1t
your mamma nm told you 70 getg ,.a, ss,or,,-r
think it was 'T died OF opossum.'' want 10 cents
worth.-Youth.
A writer describes plague OF rabbits in Aus
trala: "a farmer barricades himself in with miles
upon miles OF wire fencing solely % keep out the
rabbits. They eat their way up TO the barriers.
and In the fight for the land within the wire
they die In nyriads. All around the inclosed land
they lie in heaps OF incredible size. Swarm after
swarm follows on. and at last the heaps of dead
high that the late coners make their way
the fence. and the farm is ruined" That's
pretty good story, but the latest news from Aus
traIia is that the whole level OF the continent 10
being elevated by these strata Of dying rabbits
Tenor (singing)-"oh. 'appy. 'appy. 'appy be thy
Professor-stopI stopI Why don't you sound tho
Tenor-It don't go no higher than "g."-Christian
Register
There Is a training school for elephants at Api
in the Congo State where twenty-eight elephants
are taking lessons The training operations have
produced encouraging results says the ''Tribuno
CongoIaise." In February the elephants were al
ready employed IN transporting bricks. Every day
five elephants carried three times from the brick
kiln 70 the houses under construction large
Der OF bricks apiece One of the elephants was
employed in dragging small cart. but it found
that some OF them objected to this kind Of work
Pert and Pertinent-'I suppose. Mrs De Ritch.
you enjoy your family tree SO much this sultry
What do you mean. Mr., sharp7 Why should
because it's such a very shady one."-Baltinore
American.
Some years ago. when bicycling popu-
lar than II IS to-day, Bishop Donahue, OF Wheeling.
w Va, essayed 70 learn 20 ride. He had the usual
experiences of novice. Some days later a friend.
who had the Bishop performing feats on a
wheel. asked. Bishop do you wheel now7' Ger
tainly." replied the dignitary. 'T am Bishop OF
Wheeling
It is said that the Rev. DR.. John Watson Gan
iaSer not long sgo the Conversation turned 70 the
OT Smsof ss % puH%niIg % an and DR. WA Watson 20 ts ysaTTsd D
offering 70 try then and there He sat silent for
Ss gnesfs exclansd Come along Watson Wsrs
al waiting" The preacher-puns replied az once
The Agricultural Society of Lancaster, England
at it's coming show, will conduct its catering,
providing luncheons for 5000 persons daily. The
novelties In cooking utensils include which
cooks sixty geese simultaneously, plate washing
machine, driven by 2-horsepower engine and
machine by which sixty sandwiches be made
per minute. mammoth refrigerator will store
three tons of meat. while their large hot water
boilers have each automatic refills. enabling 40
gallons Of boiling water 10 be continuously avail
resses will be employed and small army of chefs.
VOCATIONAL
From breakfast bell 20 supper bell.
From supper bell TO nine O'Clock,
This is the part of Mrs Pe-
To rock and talk, and talk and rock.
The other bOarders gad about,
In primrose paths that please them best.
But Mrs. Pell, who's rather stout.
She came up here, she says, 20 rest.
She doesn't boat. she doesn't climb.
She never drives. she never walks.
From rising bell TO bunking time
She talks and rocks. and rocks and talks
The other boarders drift away
She talks them east. she talks them west
/ She talks and talks the hvelOng day.
She came up here. she says. 70 rest
Holding the best veranda chair
She circles daily with the
She's travelled-has been everywhere
Seen everything-knows every
She talks the new moon up the sky
She talks the song bird TO his nest.
She never stops. You wonder why.
She came up here, she says. TO rest.
The househy buzzes on the glass
The brOOklet chatters in the dell,
The bumblebee drones in the grass
So drOnes and chatters Mrs. Pell.
When she will stop, IL stop at all,
The dear Lord knows who knOweth best
She TO stay clear through fall
She came UP here she says. to rest.