The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1906-08-01

stencgra,thers. II you find love bud
ding in your yong heart come to me
and get Il good'siank.ng."
l started Ill with heroic resolves. but
I was Il failure after the first week. A
black eyed typi>t with much gold in
her front teeth smiled Mt me as she
went up. She laughed at me as she
came down. She chucked me under the
chin on her third trip, and on her fourth
she whispered:
"Sammis, it is Il ease Of love ut first
sight. l can't live without you"
Three days later l got the bounce.
The trust magnates were complaining
that my elevator wabbled and that l
showed a desire to run them all down
into the basement or up against the
roof. l waited in the vestibule for the.
black eyed girl, but when she appear
ed and l spoke to her she replied:
don't ask me. Robbie. have only
been here a week."
Six different times have l loved, and
six different times have l received the
bounce. l have now ceased to love. No
matter how good looking the girl who
takes my elevator and no matter how
sweet her smile or how delicious her
giggle, keep my stern dignity and
permit of no familiarity. There are
occasions when I am chucked under
the chin and l hear the whispered ex-
clamatiOn of how sweet l am, but the
elevator wabbles by a hairs
breadth.
1,,t So - <1,., .n ,N.n %u,stO, -<l@4n ,1..-A--
boys? l ask. Alas, no.. Wherever l 60
l find them growing careless of their
duties because the sentiment of love
has touched their hearts. A month ago
q young man running an elevator in a
prominent skyscraper confided to me
that he was in love with a stenogra-
pher in the building. She was twenty
four and he sixteen, but he did not care
for the difference in their ages. In
deed, he thought it better to have an
aunt II Il mother and a sweetheart
all in one. She had patted him on the
back; she had pulled his ear; she had
praised his complexion. In her insidi-
GUS way she was Turing that boy on to
bis doom. l struggled with him, but it
was no use. His in~fatuation was COM
plete. Three days later while thinking
Of his darling he bumped his elevator
against the roof and hurt three passen-
gers and got the bounce. When he
went to the woman of his heart for
sympathy and to ask her to wait until
he could strike another engagement
she pretended that she had never seen
or heard Of him before and that he
must have become intoxicated on soda
water.
Today l could lame twenty elevator
boys who are in love. That means
twenty accidents sooner or later. 1t
also ean twenty bounces. There
should be posted up in every elevator
in the city a notice reading:
"Any girl speaking to the elevator
boy on any matter outside of business
will be compelled to walk up and
down stairs thereafter"
If you are about to take a public ele-
vator look first Mt the boy who runs it,
II he is pale faced and anxious look
Ing and seems to have something on
his mind turn your back on that cage
and take the stairs. That boy Is in
love and is worrying as to how he a
support a wife on Sc a week.
II, on the contrary, he Is chewing
gum and whistling to himself step
right in and I've hoisted.
That boy has nothing greater on his
mind than a bet on the races.
I have loved and shall love again,
but I have found that l owe a duty to
the public. That duty is to love no
more until l get through e~levating an
elevator. The profession Is a noble one
and growing nobler every day, and the
true elevator boy Is being recognized
az the hardworking hero he is, and
ever If 1t becomes necessary to appeal
to the law and a legislative investigat-
ing committee he should be protected
against the Vaccinations Of the other
sex. At least that is the opinion Of
SAMMIS,
The Elevator BOY.
Per Nj. Quad. ,..