The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1906-02-26
Some Pleas of the Stagestruck

formances up in Utica. My friends
think / am good on elOcution."
mo doubt, no doubt you are. and If
you'll take my advice, young lady.
you'll stick % the elocution and the
music and be content with the admira-
ton of your friends and family. There
are two reasons why / cannot get you
the engagement you ask for, in your
note, or rather why ! Will not. In the
first place they are not looking for new
ones to break in, and wouldn't have
time to do 1t before they go on the
road. And, moreover, we are not IN
the business OF inducing young girls
to go on the stage against the wishes
of their parents"
The agent touches the button and
the boy holds open the door. The girl
leaves.
The next visitor is a chorus man of
two or three years experience and an
agreement is quickly reached with the
agent. AS the chorus man departs a
brunette In a red tailor-made frOck en-
ters unannounced, brushing the Office
boy to one side I'm her Impotence.
Look here" she cries, ignoring the
greeting Of the agent, they've got me
down for. an old woman's part and l
won't have II. l told you / wouldn' (
take anything Hike that and mean It.
Do you think / m going to paint lot
of old wrinkles on my face and look old
for $50 a week? Not for mine! I'll
chuck the whole game first, and 1 don't
care il l never get another Job with
Grabberstein's for the rest of my nat
ural life. You try and see IL you can't
get me something decent or I'll call It
off and go down to Hirchmann. Un-
derstand?' '
The agent understands, and after five
minutes conversation the brunette
leaves, somewhat pacifled.
Now a steady stream of callers con-
tinues for two hours, until the list of
appointments is exhausted. and then
the others are received. The first two
are amateurs who have been assured by
their friends that they closely resemble
Maude Adams and would prove a
windfall to that actress should she be
| in need of an understudy. They felt
that she must be in need of at least
one.
The agent assures them that Miss
Adams has not notified him of any
such crying need, but If they will come
around in about six months he VIII
| look the matter up in the meantime.
Following them Is a dapper little man
/ in a gray suit who enters with an air
of confidence and is apparently famtl-
lar with his surroundings.
All right. Charley" says the agent,
grfnning. i've got il all fixed for you
there. and you'd better go around and
report at once, as you are due for a
reading at o'clock this afternoon.
The little man expresses his appreci-
alton, refuses an invitation to smoke
and leaves.
It is noon and there will be no more
/ business transacted before 1870 o'clock.
/ The first person to present himself in
+ the afternoon, is a large, overgTown
young man. who has a dramatiZatiOn
of a novel entitled Riches Is Not All"
He would like to get it staged. The
/ agent explains that he is not in the
| business as an angel or a stage mana
/ ger, and consequently cannot help him
! out.
/ A 16-year-old girl is ushered in. She
/ is plainly embarrassed, but finds voice
enough to say: Il want TO go on the
stage, and they told me you could get
me what 1 want if anybody could"
| DO my best to oblige," is the laco-
/ mic reply of the agent.
! He knows what is coming, and his
/ soul is filed with the WEAKNESS of a
burden long borne. The child bushes.
stammers. and finally exclaiIns in a
voice filed with evaporation at her
own awkwaTdness:
81 want to play Juliet"
! And then IL begins again-argument,
/ persuasion, fatherly advice, youthful
disappointment, tears, and general col
I lapse on the part of the agent
! The girl departs feeling that the door
/ of heaven has been rudely closed in
/ her face.
/ A tall, thin man with weeks beard
| approaches the desk.
/ well, what can / do for your asks
/ the agent Looking for job?'
do / look like a man who would
! come in here looking for a ham sand
WITCH or an automobile garage?" par
ries the visitor.
AS there is no answer, he continues;
I'm looking for a job, sure. I beat
I'D these stairs with the express pur-
/ pose of getting a job. / suppose you
want to know what experience l have
had? I used to play with Edwin Mayo
/ in Pudd nhead Wilson
''You did?" exclaims the agent sit
/ ting up in sudden surprise. What
part did you take?"
We'll. you remember in the first act
where the twins arrive there is a scene
where the steamboat comes to the
/ landing?"
Yes"
! Well I was the whistle
In that case. replies the agent, ris-
/ ing and closing his desk. Il guess II
call It a days work, and as you seem
/ to be good a whistiing yon can whistle
] e. 4oA