New-York tribune., 1906-06-16
A LA MODE.


Then dyed it in some Alice blue
I pulled the thing way out in front.
And bent 1t UP behind;
I stuck some feathers on one side
The biggest I could fnd
And bade him do his worst,
1t looked like something cursed;
A4f Phls shfp little joEe EdSs so % PSt 5a my VIE
Who thanked me with unfeigned delight
For Just the sweetest hat!'
Charles Hawtrey tells OF this experience. accord
ing to "The Boston Herald": During a trip
through Europe he found himself in small village
with There was no barber's shop IN
the place THE innkeeper told me- says Mr..
Hawtrey that there man in the village
who occasionally shaved people, and determined
TO risk two. and sent for him.
1.-The amateur barber arrived. and after little
hesitation he said to viii you please. sir. lie
down fiat on your back while I shave you?'
thinking that it was probably the custom OF
the country. I stretched comfortably on my
back and nearly went to sleep while the fellow
shaved me- so light his touch
When he had finished I said: curious to
know why you asked to lie down to be shaved
because SIR was his ingenious reply. I never
before shaved live mani /"
The Heartless Editor-Assistant-Th poet SAYS
that the last two verses OF his poem may be omit
ted, II you think II is desirable; m - 49,.
whole poem--Somerville Journal
little girl who was suffering. according TO 1.-THE
London Tribune from a bad cold in the head. had.
as usual. repeated her prayers at her mothers
knee. And o, Dod.'' she concluded, please
ascuse being snuffiy.''
Friend-If. you say. you found her so violent
and headstrong, even during the engagement. why
did you marry her?
Husband (neekly)-I didn't marry her. She mar
ried me--Illustrated Bits.
The country editor has to take his constituents
into his confidence. The editor of an Oklahoma
paper writes thus: The Editor OF The News Re-
publican is going to tog up little this evening
Going to change collars and put a pair of cuffs,
If he find any. Going to get shaved. and going
to get shoes shined and the pegs cut out. we
can walk right peartly. Mas a-comin' down see
US You know who Is Ma is only ma. and
she's a good one, too-ono of the old Ohio Quaker
sort, you know Ma lives in Kingfsher. She was
our ma when were born; she out in
Western Kansas when hunted prairie coal; she
wa. ma when we drank parched corn coffee in
old Oklahoma in 49, and she's our ma now. She 3
the best ever knew. If you us to-mor-
row walking down the street with g little woman
with a smile on her face, you'll know that's
II you never had a ma. you should get one-and
one like our ma. too
Rather Distant.-"There Is something rather pc
ouliar about some OF the chapters In your sea
novel" said the publisher Are you familiar with
T Should say So" replied the new author. haugh-
Indeed And where did you write it2"
'@Why, at my homo in Indiana. where all the
great authors come from"-Chicago News
The inspector In the English school asked the
boys of the school he was examining: Can you
take your warm overooat ofr?" Yes. SIR"
the response Can the bear take his
overcoat OFF, mo. sir why not?'' There
was silence a while and then a little boy spoke
I'D please, sir because God alone knows where
the buttons are
a commercial is 10 be compared to a literary
career" asked the high browed and melancholy
youth. -
"My boy said Mr.. Cumrox, in business
can write your piece of paper bigger
than a postal card and make it worth thousands
of dollars In literature you can write up reams OF
paper without making 1t worth so cents. Wash
fngton Star.