davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-08-02
GettInu at the Facts,

"Yee," said the Georgia fisherman,
"the snake had fifty rattles and seven
buttons"
THAT won't go down, my friend.
But-what did you have?"
"Well, had a jug that held two
gallons, and only had one handle"
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-08-02

A church In Grippsland, the east
ern province of Victoria, may be said
to have required but single tree
trunk for It's construction. inasmuch
as giant eucalyptus was followed
out until room sufficient to contain
a congregation of fifty was formed.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-08-02
Sims If the Pen.

Among those present, with whom
his lordship shook hands very cordial
ly. were three men, one armless."-
-, a deaf mute, was brought Ho
on remand 49,. The prisoner did not
wish to say anything, and was COM
mitted for trial"
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-08-02
Warning.

If you have kidney and bladder
trouble and do not use Foley's Kid
ney Cure, you will have only your
self to blame for results, as 1t posi-
lively cures all forms of kidney
and bladder disease. r. S. Free
man and Son.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-08-02
For Cleaning Bottles.

Salt and vinegar make an excellent
solution for cleaning bedroom water
bottles or wine decanters. A dessert
spoonful OF rough salt put into wine
decanter, moistened with vinegar and
well shaken generally removes all
stains.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-08-02
8polls In jersey.

Briggs was crossing the Jersey
meadows the other day in a large
auto, when we we're attacked by
band of mosquitoes.
Griggs-ThWsday morning, wasn't
it?
YES; how did you know"
why, on Thursday afternoon saw
them passing over Newark and some
Of them had goggles on"
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-08-02
Not Quite the ThInu.

TITS just possible" remarked the
editor of the Bugle, in his patient way,
that jerks may decline to pay for his
ad in this issue The big headlines
should have read: We have more
furniture, bedding, and rugs than we
care to carry in stock"
"Well?" queried the foreman.
well, it's bugs in the paper"
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-08-02
The Immortal John.

Now, Harold" asked an Evanston
teacher, "can you tell me who signed
the Declaration of independence"
Yes, Miss Blankston. John Han
cock and lot of other men, but I
don't remember their names.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-08-02

Orino Laxative Fruit Syrup is
sold under a positive guarantee to
cure constipation, sick headache,
stomach trouble, or any form of in
digestion. If it fails, the manufac-
turers refund your money. What
more can any one do. r. S. Free
man and Son.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-08-02
Still Spjteful.

Her-Yes, she married him to spite
another girl.
Him-But why did she divorce him?
Her-So he could marry the other
girl and thus spite her some more.
Get a 5 cent box of Lax-ets at our
store please. We think they are
great. Just test these toothsome,
candy-like Laxative Tablets for con-
stipation, sour stomach, billousness,
bad breath, muddy complexion, etc.
Risk s cents and see. r. S. Free
man & Son.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-08-02
A Bracer.

'G' made fourteen calls this after
noon and don't feel bit tired" said
Maude
How does that happen?"
Every one that saw told me how
well / was looking"
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-08-02
THE GENUINE
DIR. BELL IS PINE-T HONEY
has the Bell or the bottle
(First publication July 5, 1867
PROBATE NOTICE.

STATE OF WISCONSIN, County Court for
Pierce County.-In Probate.
Notice is hereby given that at the regular
term of the County Court to be held in and for
said county. at the County Court room in the
village of Ellsworth in said county on the first
Tuesday (being the 4th day. of September, A.
d. 1906, at 10 o'clock a. m. the following matter
will be heard and considered
The application of Lavina A. Barg for the
Appointment of Lavina A. Barg of the city of
River Falls, Pierce county, Wisconsin, as adj
ministratrix of the estate of Oluf II. Barg, late
of the city Of River Falls, in said county, de-
ceased.
Dated July I'd, A. d. 1906.
BY order of the Court,
ALLEN p. WELD, County Judge.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-08-02

For dry, cracked lips or rough
skin use DR.. Shops Green Salve.
1t positively makes lips and skin
like velvet. Sold by r. S. Free
man & Son.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-08-02
Not Appropriate.

Tess-Young Silliman tells me his
first name is Noah. What you think
of that?
Jess-Old-fashi isn't it?
ess-Old-fashionod? It's positive
ly ridiculous Noah had sense enough
TO go in when 1t rained.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-08-02
Consumption Cure Warmers White
Wine of Tar Syrup,

the best cough remedy on earth,
cures a cold in one day if taken in
time. Is and so cents. For sale at
Taggart' drug store.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-08-02
USUALLY the Case.

Miles-Swiggs has turned over
new leaf and is trying to patch up
his reputation.
Giles-Well, if he succeeds III bet
the patches will show.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-08-02
Not Easy.

'Is he in easy circumstances"
Yes, and he got there by not being
Easy"
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-08-02

DIR. Rea has had Is years OF actual exper-
fence in the treatment and cure of all durable
medical and surgical diseases of the Eye Ear
Nose and Throat, Lung Diseases, Early Con
sumption, Bronchitis, Bronchial Catarrh, Con-
stitutional atarrh, Nasal Catarrh, Dyspepsia,
Sick Headache, Stomach and Bowel Troubles,
Appendicitis, Rheumatism, Neuralgia Scia-
tica, Bright's disease, Diabetes, Kidney, Liver
Bladder Troubles, Prostate and Female Dis
cases. Dizziness, Nervousness, indigestion,
Obesity, Interrupted Nutrition, Slow Growth
in Children and all wasting diseases in adults.
Many cases of Deafness, Ringing in the Ears
Loss of Eyesight, ataract, Cross Eyes, ETC.,
that have been improperly treated can be cas-
lily restored. Dictionaries, Club Feet, Curva-
ture of the Spine, Disease of the Brain, Para
lysis, Heart Disease. Dropsy, Swelling of the
Limbs, Structure, Open Sores, Pain in the
Bones, Granular Enlargments, and all long
standing diseases properly treated. Failing
Memory, weak eyes, StUnGed DEVELOPMENT
ack of energy, impoverished blood, pimples,
impediments to marriage, blood and skin dis
eases, Eruptions Hair Falling, Swellings, Sore
Throat. Ulcers Weak Back, Burning Urine.
passing urine too often, Structure, etc. receive
searching treatment as experienced in the line
of modern medicine, and as adopted by Amer
ica's most emminent specialist.
Cancers, Tumors, Goitre, Fistula, Piles, Rup-
ture, and enlarged glands treated successfully
with the hyperderdermic injection method.
This is really one of the most scientific and
surely effective plans of the goth century, No
incurable cases taken with guarantee to cure.
onsultation and examnati on to those inter
ested, $780,
. f. .. D. r e A,
With Rea Bros & Co.,
Minneapolis, Louisville. New York
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1906-08-02
For Burns.

Apply white of egg at once. 1t will
give relief.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-08-11
THE LITTLE THINGS
SMALL CoURTESIES WOMEN LIKE
AND EXPECT FROM MEN.
About All That Is Left for the Steiner
Sex to Do the Rest May Safely
Be Left to Woman
kind.

The woman said chivalry was dead
The man acquiesced and said it was
all the fault of women themselves
You see," he went on, you wom-
en- have become so independent that
there is little left for men to do for
you. You can do almost everything
for yourself nowadays, and we have
been forced into the position of stand
ing one side and watching YOU
There's hardly a thing 1 can do for
you but what you can do for your
self. and 1 feel absolutely foolish Of
fering to do things. For instance,
what is the use of me helping you on
and on a car when you golf. bowl.
walk miles and, in fact, are more ath-
letic than l am? It's really presump-
tuous of me to think of offering my
aid.
why should l rush to take you to
the theater when you run into a mat
inee whenever you feel like it? 1 can
not even order a dinner better than
you can. You are so used to ordering
when you are on a shopping trip or
are delayed downtown for some rea-
son, that my menu would not be SO
good as yours. Why should l pre-
some to hustle to hail handsom
when you have done it 100 times your
self and do 1t better and more grace
fully than l do? Why should l brow
beat the conductor who gave you
bad nickel in change when I've heard
you tell again and again how you
had given such individuals piece OF
your mind on similar occasions?
why should 1 ever suppose you are
pleased to get flowers from me when
you proudly boast that you earn
money enough to buy your own flow
ers whenever you feel like it? Then
there's the matter of confectionery.
You discover the new candies the min
ute they are on the market and buy a
sample before / have got wind that
there is anything new
Time was when young girl never
went driving unless young man took
her. Now you go out to livery stable
and hire a rig whenever you have the
desire to take little spin, and, of
course, 1 feel that I'm offering you
something very tame if l ask you to
go driving. You even automobile, so
there's no pleasure in asking you out
in a machine l can't even offer you
new books to read, for ten chances
to one you get hold of them before
/ do.
so what Is there left for the men
to do? You women yourselves have
shown us how Unnecessary certain lit
tie attentions are, so we naturally
have shrunk from offering them"
Just then the woman dropped her
handkerchief, and the man stopped to
pick it up
That's what you can do" she said.
"Those little things that show you are
thoughtful and considerable, and Wei
readily forgive you for not doing the
big things which you say all we WON
en- can do for ourselves.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-08-11
Mrs. Julia Ward Howe,s Joke.

Despite her advanced years (she
recently celebrated the eighty-sev-
enth anniversary of her birth in her
charming home in Boston, surround
er by her children and friends), Mrs.
Julia W ard Howe retains her aptitude
for the making of clever phrases. A
few days ago, on her return from Bal
timore, when she had been recuper-
ating from a slight illness, Mrs.
Howe was driven through one of the
side streets of Boston with friends,
and passed the charitable eye and ear
infirmary. That institution does
much good, and no one knows it bet
ter than Mrs. Howe. But as she
looked at the building and slowly
read the name, she said, without the
shadow of a smile: Il don't see the
good of that place. why, what do
you mean?" asked a friend, in aston
ishment" This said Mrs. Howe:
Il did not know there was a char
table eye or ear in Boston; so what
is the use of an infirmary for them p
Though she had lived all her life in
Boston, Mrs. Howe never had lost
sight of the peculiar characteristics
of the residents of the Hub.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-08-11

money. When these men become con-
6dential they admit the fact that with
all their lavish OUTLAWS they have
failed to secure everything they set out
to gather in. Sometimes a man tries to
get his arms SO full of bundles that he
cannot hold them adj Sometimes the
big ones crush the more delicate par
cells all out of shape, but there are
human limitations in every direction
and it seems easy to reach them in
the building line. 1 have seen COM
Portable cottages that cost very little
money and l have seen very uncom-
Portable mansions that were very ex-
pensive to build and expensive to keep
up afterwards.
In building a summer home it is
well to remember two things. A
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-08-11

Haven't I ben a satisfactory wife!
What can you say against mee"
''Nothin''' Cope spoke YEARLY.
That is-no-really nothin'-
Then what do you mean by sayin'
I druv you toto killin' yourself?
Didn't you think of me-a good, for
bearin' wffe-to shoulder such curse
all my days, and you dyin' for moth
IMP
You'd a ben well left and pro-
vided for said Cope doggedly- Folks
would say twas Temporary insanity
I'm shook up some, but 1 amt crazy.
1 meant it. Livin' don't seem quite so
bad as it did" He gave a grim smile,
adding, "Twasn't the way to go, but
you'd have ben better off, Dorcas.
Can you say you wouldn'tT
You amt explainin' this" cried his
wife with sudden excitement The
idea of layin' the fault onto mel What
is it? You'll tell me, Beecher Cope
I'm endurin', but this is past endurin'-
Something you've got in your head
ag'in me, and I'll know it. What have
l done?"
You've froze mel" exclaimed her
husband loudly. 81 dunno how to tell
it, but that's it,
And you've froze me-" returned
Dorcas, her sallow cheeks flaming.
Its your own doing. I'll tell you this
i went to the barn to say that l
meant to leave you-that I'd rather
live in refrigerator than go on with
never a look nor word to show 1 was
anything to you nOwadays-nO more
than a COW. Froze you, indeed. I've
been stiffened up and frost-bitten till
l haven't even a warm tear left to
shed for a sick baby!"
The old couple gazed at each other.
Loud licked the wooden clock on the
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-08-11
LIKES HER TRUNDLE BED.
Aged Maine Woman Has Never Slept
in Anything Else and Re
fuses to Change.

North Pennington, Me.-Determined
to sleep her last night on earth in the
trundle bed she has slept in for all the
so years of her life, Ann Gillian, of this
place, the oldest of the Gillian SIS
ters,' as they are known, is dying of
cancer of the stomach at her home.
Ann Gillian first began to sleep in
her trundle bed when only year old,
and as she grew older she refused to
sleep in larger bed, as her sisters
did. Every night she pulled out the
little bed from under the larger one
of the other two sisters and pushed it
back in the morning.
When recently she was taken very
i'll DIR. L. ". Brown ordered her to be
placed in a larger bed, where she could
rest in comfort But she resisted with
all her strength, and when one sister
told her she must change to larger
bed or she would die she said: die
it is, then. for I'll never sleep in an.
other bed"
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-08-11

the cut and dried fashions for winter.
ii good inventive carpenter may be
had it is about as cheap to have a good
deal of the furniture made right in
the house. Lounges, window seats,
chairs, tables, cupboards and such
things sometimes look better than
boughten ones. 1t depends on the ar
tistic manner in which they are got
ten up. But homemade bedroom con-
trivances made out of old packing
boxes should be discouraged energetic
ally. AS ordinarily done there is no
originality about that kind of make
shift child's play. 1t is suggestive of
poverty both in ideas and ready cash.
If you attempt something original do
it right
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-08-11
Sardinia Once Wild Country.

Sardinia was a wild place in the
middle of the last century. A trav-
eler says: THE men. are clothed in
goat-skins, one before and another
behind, without breeches, shoes or
stockings, and wooden or skin cap
on the head. The women have no
other habiliments than long wooden
gown and a wooden cap. The peas
ants always go armed to defend them
selves from one another. so that trav.
cling in the interior is extremely uu-
safe without an escort; and it is even
dangerous for ships to send their peo-
pie on shore for water unless they
are well armed In short, the Sardes
are the Malays of the Mediterranean "
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-08-11

A plain neat little house suitable for
a summer cottage may be constructed
very cheaply by following this plan
To secure air and comfort in hot
weather as well as in cool weather
bedrooms are provided both inside and
outside of the house proper. The main
building is a small affair only 16 feet
wide by SO feet in length without
measuring the porches and the
ground floor is divided into two rooms,
a large living room Is by "a feet and
kitchen by Is feet.
This big room has a beam ceiling.
Beam ceilings are Dutch. They may
be faddy in the United States at the
present time, but they look all right
when properly furnished, in fact there
is something suggestive of ease, socia-
bility and general comfort about
room that is ceiled overhead in this
way. The beams have solid sort of
supporting effect popularity supposed to
SAVIOR of knickerbocker times when
economy was a necessary virtue and
they did not understand the cheap art
of sticking plaster firmly enough over
head so that it would not descend in
patches at intervals on the heads of
our stocking fashioned ancestors.
This house is so constructed that the
main body of it may be made warm
and comfortable late in the fall by hav-
ing a good range in the kitchen and a
fire in the fireplace. With the stair
door open the upper rooms may be
made quite comfortable even in fairly
cold weather. The other two bed
rooms in the veranda sections could
be closed off at this time. 1t is difficult
to plan a house to meet all require
merits. A good many wealthy men
have undertaken to cover the problem
by the expenditure of a great deal of
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-08-11

old cloth-covered mantel. One min
spoke slowly.
WAS you thinkin' of separation,
Dorcas?"
1T had come to that pass with me,
Beecher.'
For good and all?"
Yes, SIR
Copes feet shifted forward and he
hitched his chair nearer.
'"Most ten years ago." he said, SOL
EMMY, Il smashed my thumb mendin'
a fence, and 1 come to you to have it
done up. You done it all right and
kind enough, but there was somethin'
in the way your face looked and your
fashion of turnin' away, disgusted-
like, that hurt my feelin's dreadful.
Twas as if you hated to touch me, or
have me touch you, and it bit into me.
Thinks 1, if I've got too old for COM
fortin' and being fused over, so be
it All day, 1 KEEP feelin' in my pock-
cts to see what I'd lost, but things was
all there. What I'd lost wasn't in my
clothes. And 1 tried to cuss away the
feelin', but 1t wouldn't leave me.
hated to go in to meals-somehow-''
81 rec'lect that mornin'," rejoined
the woman absently. MY nerves was
all on edge with neuralgia. Was that
the day you set readin' your paper
after supper, and come up to put
my arm around you, meanin' to give
you a kiss, and you turned your head
away quick and shrinked from me? 1t
made my heart stop beatin', was SO
surprise. and mad. Says 1 to myself,
The next kiss comes from him. 1t
never ca-e-
Funny you should have remem-
bered that muttered the farmer
stroking his chin whisker thought
fully.
Funny you should have remem-
bered your thumb" Dorcas pulled out
her spectacles. adjusted them careful
ly and looked at him.
'tAnd the next day, and the next. TIL
it was weeks, months, years of Twin
in an east wind" quoth her spouse
'Perlite and respectful we was al
ways, but couldn't shake on the diff
ference. 1t eat into me. Lately, it,
ben worse. / got sick of it. Twas al
through me like a disease, and u
CROWN older and queerer. That
why II borrowed your clothes line
Were those tears trickling from be
meath the spectacles of Dorcas? TIL
old man did not see. He could no
{ for the sudden mist clouding his eyes
Perhaps it's best to let you CO." h
murmured, "but-I-dunno.'
Twas your left thumb" cried Dor
cas-, irrelevantly- Let's see it"
Cope gave another hitch and thei
: knees touched. The woman bent 10,
| over the rough, SCARED membel
? pressed her lips to it and sobbed.
"I take it back, husband" sh
? choked. '.The first kiss comes frol
l me-"
e God be thanked" His husky whis
e per broke THE winds from the sout
d now, Dorcas. Well keep it BLOWN
e dear, we'll keep it blowin'i"
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-08-11

priation by some wandering vandal
after you leave the cottage in the fall.
The architect estimates that this
comfortable little house may be built
for less than 81 GOO and believe he is
right. 1t is not necessarily expensive
in any particular In fact for a house
of this kind very cheap material may
be used and the whole thing put to-
gether in hurry. Sometimes the bed
rooms are neither ceiled nor plastered,
but it usually is best to use building
paper outside and either plaster or
some ceiling stuff insided. With build
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-08-11
Ground Floor Plan.

great advantage is fresh air and out
door life This is the chapest as well
as the best part of summer outing
The other is when you go away for
the summer you want to leave care
and responsibility behind Wear your
old clothes so you will not worry
about soiling them, Use cheap furni-
ture that would not prove a serious
loss in case of fire or in case of appro-
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-08-11
king dictates rrain,s speed-

When King Edward is about to take
railway journey his majesty is In
variably consulted as to the speed at
which the royal special shall travel
Charles Santley. the famous bari
tone who is still singing at the age
of 70. is probably the greatest inguist
in the concert world, speaking fluent
ly French. German, Italian and Span
ish and has a wide knowledge o,
Greek and Latin
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-08-11

ing paper inside as well as outside the
house is cooler in warm weather and
warmer in cold weather and the ex-
pense is not much greater. 1t is not
necessary to cell the house the first
year. 1t may be built and nicely
painted outside and the inside finish
ings left for some other time.
In furnishing a summer cottage con-
siderable originality may be brought
out. No two cottages should be alike.
Variety and originality are appreciated
in summer furnishings more than in
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-08-11
The Safety Mustache.

Patience-Peggy says that mus
tache keeps the microbes out of the
mouth
Patrice-That's the reason she likes
to kiss a man with mustache. sup
pose?-Yonkers Statesman.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-08-11

Mr. William A Radford will answer
questions and give advice FREE OF
COST on all subjects pertaining to the
subject of building for the readers of this
paper On account of his wide expe-
rience Editor, Author and Manufac-
turer, he is. without doubt. the highest
authority on all these subjects Address
all inquiries to William A Radford, No
1874 Fifth Ave, Chicago. Ill, and only
enclose two-cent stamp for reply.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-08-11
Not Exhausted.

She-Henry. I'm going to give you
a piece of my mind
He-I thought I'd had it ALL
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-08-11

al talking machines are not made;
some are bern
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-08-11
La Cygne Votes Bonds.

La Cygne has voted bonds to build
an $4,000 school house. Only eight
votes were recorded against the propo-
sition. The old school house WIS
struck by lightning June %.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1906-08-11
would Build Interurban Line.

]. P. Carroll, of Kansas City, is
trying to interest the commercial club
of Salina in an interurban street rail-
way from Salfna to Concordia. The
club has not yet taken any action.