The Birmingham age-herald., 1906-04-26
HOMES! HOnES!! HOMES!l!
 Ho, Therel Ye .'Chronic' Home Seekersii5

Avauntl Ye Chronic newspaper mis- take makers, who made us say. CHOICE" for "CHRON1C," when "you-uns' know and everybody else knows we never said anything good like that in our lives; and even friend, when they saw it written (yesterday CHOICE" promptly called us up over the phone and voluntarily admitted that they were among the "cHRONIC' seek CTS, and that they knew that 1t was only the wretehed old newspaper that had just shoveled the "CHOICE'' type from the bin. and blindly neglected the "CHRONIC."
 And. besides. when I said don't call' for a $12,OO0 home If you expect it at s100 00O." they just take a fresh dig with the type scoop and bring out the old "CHRONIC" newspaper mistake of eaus- ing us to invite you 10 just call and get the place for less, even for less than s10,0O0, that was refused for it.
 But it's all in life time; whats the use of worryin' over things you can't help, and what's the use nv thinkin bad words when you feel so much more com fortable the other way ?"-And. besides, what's the use of being a Chronic seeker when you can be an up-to-date finder" df you really know what you want to find), and when you can get the very thing you are lookin for, If you'll only "be good and don't fool yourself and ye disconsolate agents, and will con- sent to be content simply with the earth without requiring the little gold bands around 1t
 Oh, we'll our little kicl5in' spell is now all over and the newspapers are still doin' Dizziness at the ole stand, and still shovelin' type 10 suit themselves; the Ts,Hra c4fl abroad in the land. and as usual, ye hum ble agint don't stand "enny show and must succumb to the inevitable, and must let 'em all just have their own way, so come along, and let all quit fussin' with each other, and sayln' seat, when there ain't much to scat about enny way, and if you'll do this, we will not only sell you the homes, with ''The Earth" but we will call on the papers. who have afflict ed a long suffering public long enough, to make a showln and get them Con paper) to throw in the ''gold' bands. so that everybody will get what they want, and be happy.
 We call your special attention to a few choice homes below. and if you have your eye on the Bird come along, young man, or ole Bach, or ye chronic married renters, as the case may be, and get your cage.
 We offer you a few samples below to select from:
 $5500-New modern 7-room, 2-story corner
 stucco home, furnace heat, porcelain
 bath hot and cold water, fine cellar;
 fronts park and two car lines. South
 Highlands. Easy terms.
 s750o-A very elegant new modern 2-story Broom, slate roof, stucco residence, In one of the finest locations on the South Highlands. with furnace heat, artistic interior decorations, finish and arrange ment, large lot; you could not build the house for $620O; rents $500; a real first class. up-to-date bargain Best work; see it.
 s275O-New 2-story 7-room modern home fronts south, on North Highlands; $500 cash and $30 month.
 $2500-2-story Broom home, fronts car line, North Highlands; $500 cash, balance $500 year at per cent.
 $4000-100x160, 10-room 2-story residence, near 18th st; overlooks city; North Highlands.
 $11 ,OO0-A very elegant, massive style, beautiful new 2-story 1O-room mansion; Nabob-(bie) in appearance; large grounds, attractive surroundings, sta bles. outbuildings; choicest of locations, North Highlands. As our adjectives and adverbs are giving out. we shall just ask you to call and see one of the most at tractive North Highlands homes on the market
 s11 ,0OO-100x200, 2-story Broom residence, large stables, servants house. garden. lawn; east front on Highland ave car line; blocks of Rhodes circle South
 Highlands. This, when certain addl-
 tions now under way and contract, are completed, will be in the s15OOO class
 and therefore don't need any adjectiyes ta Gf f,ra aia1 uclx why will the owner sell it? Well, he
 hasn't got sense enough to- let well
 enough alone Qike a good many others)
 thinks he wants something else and will likely wake up after he sells it to find
 he cannot duplicate it, and If you want
 a good thing you'd better not ask so many questions, but just call and see this and do your own thinking. s11, ,000--One of the finest large corner lots on 11th ave, South Highlands, with ele- gant 10-room, beautifully finished, To- room homes on market; owner leaving city, and whether he leaves or stays tor if he does both), it doesn't matter; this
 is @ good thing and that's all you need
 to know. you inquisitive old sinner, youi
 Come and see this, and it will mellow the tone of many useless and unreason- able inquiries.
 $75O0-A neat 2-story. Broom, furnace heated nome; east ffOnt; Splendld loca- tion, fine elevation, large lot, choice sur roundings; near 11th ave, South High lands. Terms reasonable.
 $3500-House alone worth $40O0; fine lot: servants house, south front, edge of South Highlands; rents s30 month: should bring October next $35 or $40 month; $S500; hold today only. $4500-Two-story modern 7-room corner home near 18th street, South Highlands. s10. .000--14Ox190, fine 10-room corner, finest location and among the best bargains on the Highlands; a valuable, prominent home, fronts two car lines. See it. s7000-An elegant modern 2-story. Broom, furnace heated home. near Highland avenue. two blocks of Five Points. Terms to suit buyer; small cash pay ment balance per cent.
 SIP, ,0C0-One of the finest, swellest 2-story modern S-room homes on the South Highlands; 3 baths, modern plumbing. furnace heat and grates all over the house; interior decorations beautiful. lovely furnishings, walls and floors so polished and slick that ye humble "agints' not used to 'em) have watch both feet and hear at the same time to keep from slippin' up; looking glasses unnessary-just look at the floor and ceilin' and see how ugly you are and ask the good Lord to forgive you; then draw a sigh of relief and look com posedly at the prettiest, most artistic. best finished, best located home on the