The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1906-12-11
Moves The Bowels

children ana tue hothVl' '"N" -
three were recovered, Mary had only
to say:
Dear me, II Is wonderful how llttie
am appreciated, Just see what IL
was to have little laid by for rainy
day"
John, being human, could not help
answering: But, my dear II you
had not been foolish and nlegardly
about little things, we would have had
no such rainy day"
Nevertheless, Mary kept on think
Ing. % am never appreciated
In time new baby came to the
household, and the four were dellghted
over It. No one loved 1t more truly
and fondly than Mary, and yet she al
most caused its death,
Desiring a new crib for the infant
instead of buying a new one, she hunt'
ed about in secondhand stores until
she found one, beautiful little nest,
at an absurdly low price,
TrIumphantly she had 1t sent home
and put her dainty little baby right
'uto it, rejoicing over the small
amount she had saved Mysteriously
the baby sickened with scarlet fever,
the other children were sent to rela-
tives. and for a weary period Tie
mother fought with the terrible
scourge. In time, she learned that her
bargain purchase had been previously
occupied by baby who had died OF
the disease her child contracted.
At another time the family was
nearly poisoned with canned goods.
/ Mary habitually purchased her grocer
+ les where she could get the most goods
/ for the least expenditure OF money,
! and never stopped to think whether
! the food were wholesome. The cans
+ were battered, the paper soiled, and
/ In some cases missing, but she mag
J ined that the contents would he all
right, and then they we're such a bar
gain The goods were inferior, or
they would not have been placed at a
low price.
Il have such a bargain is an ex-
! preston John shivers to hear, for he
/ knows what it means So once he ell
deayored to teach her good lesson,
He came home early in the evening,
and before they went to dinner said
sternly: I'VE all need dose of medi-
/ cine
Indeed we do not, Mary responded,
for she does not approve of medicine
except in extreme cases.
Wen have to take it, John re-
turned, because got it cheap"
Then followed a very disagreeable
lime, while all were dosed with an
extremely bad tasting but in reality
very harmless remedy,
The following night John an
nounced; Hurry dinner, Mary for
we're going to a lecture on geology
tonight"
But know nothing about geology
John, and don't want to CO. Mary
objected.
oh, yes, you do. | bought these
tickets because | got them at 60 per
cent. off. They attended the lecture
and yawned through the entire even
ing.
Within a week, he brought home
four strange men, business acquaint
, ances of his, saying, when his wife oh
iected: ITS so much cheaper to en-
terrain them at home than at a res
, taurant" But now he has ceased
since she appeared to profit very little
by his instructions. for right in The
. midst of his lessons she proclaimed
Il have bought the best thing, anl
, saved at least $40
; John meekly asked: What is +
This time?'
THE children have wanted a pet
We have so much rubbish which
. cannot make. up my mind to throp
away-and then milk is SO expensive
and have found out 'how to solve
the three questions"
We'll, how" John inquired, a pre-
monltion Of coming trouble stealing
I over him"
: Il have provided the children witt
+ 4 nice pet; I have obtained something
T. which will do away with the rubbish
2 problem. and which will also provide
9 milk for lts all. and at such a log
price! know It was best to buy IT,.
t Proudly she led the way TO the lam
}, dry. where. tied to A leg of the sta
e tionary washtubs. was a well-beardet
old billy goat, munching away very Sc
riously at a pair of Uatent leathe
. shoes
|. John. with grim face. looked a
Q hts wife's new plan for saving toward
+ The rainy dag. Then burst into pei
!, feet roar Of laughter. and as soon a
= he could find his voice, he said, gasI
n ingly:
o Well Mary. guess you've foun
# somcthlng that viii eat us out OF hous
Il and home all ri@hl and perhaps N
o children can stand the odor, and won
a Mad being tossed all over the yard
!. But the world got 30 come to an en-
y before youU be able to provide thi
family with milk from an old bill
goat
!, va "A Feather in Ones Cap"
: Our expression. "A feather in one
cap. originated in Hungary in 1881