Waterbury evening Democrat., 1906-07-11
POETIC AL STATESMEN.
Some of Them Use Their Own While
 Others Make Quotations.

6i0oc eo iutcISpcTSo tHelT SpeeCHeS on the floor of the senate and house with poetical quotations. Especially is this true in set speeches, most of which are never delivered, but which are incorporated in the Congressional Record that they may be later print cd in pamphlet form and distributed to admiring constituents. A few apt quotations from the classics, either , English or other. is well calculated to impress the aforesaid admiring constituent with the idea that his i senator or member is eruidite and , familiar with the poets of all ages. 1 The books of reference and compila-. tions of quotations come in very :; handy on such occasions and at the expense of a little time and trouble a member can work up a first-class reputation as a scholar. Occasional !, ly member of the house-it is not often done in the senate-will work I of on his colleagues some more or less original alleged poetry. Some ! times 1t is very good and at others i quite the reverse. The closing hours !, of congress were marked with the appearance of many such effusions. ' Tn some cases the members avowed i personal responsibility for the jim { gles while in others they attributed them to unnamed constituents, al though it is suspected that the al- legged poetry was really written by the member.
 Representative Boutell of Illinois, in the course of a speech replying to Representative Rainey of the same state, who had attacked the watch trust" put out parody on "Watchman, Tell Us of the Night, as follows:
 "Watchman, tell us of your friend, I What his signs of promise mean; | Can you really, truly buy Cut-rate diamonds of Keene? ] And if cut-rate diamonds
 At Keene's are really sold, Then why not cut-rate silver
 And cut-rate bars of gold? Watchman, tell us of the trade,
 That our funds we may not waste; Are cut-rate diamonds smuggled,
 Or are they simply paste? IWatchman, tell us yet again, What these signs of promise mean, i Which seems now the bigger fraud,
 The diamonds or Keene?" l Representative Cushman of Wash ington, whose reputation as a wit IS second to none in the house, in the course of political speech. read some poetry which he said should De dedicated to the democratic party or at least to Representative Cochran of New York, ''who is its orator and prophet" The lines he read were: neep out of the past, for its high
 ways
 Are damp with malarial gloom; | It's gardens are sere, and its forests
 are drear,
 And everywhere holders tomb. Keep out of the past, it is lonely | And barren and bleak to the view; Il It's fires have grown cold, its stories I are old.
 Turn--turn to the present, the
 new.
 To-day leads you up to the hilltops
 That are kissed by the radiant sun. To-day shows no tomb, life's hopes
 are in bloom,
 And to-day holds a prize to be
 won."
 This caused Representative Gaines to come back at Mir Cushman with a dainty little piece of poetry which he attributed to one of his constituents, entitled When Democracy Will Die. v These lines have a reminiscent flavor and by changing the last four of them, it can be made applicable to most any old thing. They read: When the lion eats grass like an OK,
 And the fishworm swallows the
 whale;
 When the terrapin knits woolen
 socks;
 And the hare is outrun by the snail;
 When serpents walk upright like
 men,
 And doodle bugs travel like frogs. When the grasshopper feeds on the
 hen,
 And feathers are found on hogs; When Thomas cats swim in the air | And elephants roost upon trees; When insects in summer are rare, And snuff never makes people
 sneeze:
 When the fish creep over dry land, And mules on velocipedes ride; When foxes lay eggs in the sand. And women in dress take no pride; When Dutchmen no longer drinl beer, And girls get to preaching on time When the billy goat butts from ths rear, , And treason no longer Is crime; , When the hurrying bird brays lik'
 as ass, And Iimburger smells like cologne , When plowshares are made out O glass, And hearts of Tennesseans ar'
 stone: When sense grows in republican heads, . And wool on the hydraulic ram; Then the democratic party will b dead. And this country not worth d-n.