New-York tribune., 1906-04-17
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

Figaro notes that insulting expressions lose
their edge with and ones have constantly
to be found. The paraments of some nations
where dsorderly abound should be fertile
source of expressions of contempt. Figaro
instances as the latest example of a successful
achever of this duty Deputy in the Italian Par
lament who. addressing himself 10 a Sgnor San
tint, cried, with menacing gesture, You
coleopteron!' To call a man a beetle possessed the
three essentials of absurdity. unexpectedness and
injustice and therefore attained at bound the
dignity of first class insult. whose immediate
of wild disorder. 1t is splendid
word of contumey, witty as DR.. Johnsons par
alleopipedon" and much more insulting. for almost
every knows that parallelopipedon is a very
respectable figure, but a coleOpteron!-
ADVANTAGES
GAtacks of scaristna and dphtheria become and
life advances 1t is consong know that
The Medical Times
What blessings enjoy
Who sometimes sadly say,
The pleasures that knew as boy
And there remain
But toll and pain
For aged men to-day"
So let me count them up
And truly! suppose.
With blessings overfows
Her healing balm
On seniors bestows.
catch no whoopins cough
i conjugate no verbs.
Ny ynGRsa fRfaad % Of mfs'as fe dstSrSs SgsSsns off
And take for fbs
No bread and bitter herbs.
es ese tpSyn1f3ns no ITTs my my gIs sleeves
The lack of unripe fruit not grieves
It's presence pre- enc no not alarms alarms;
think I'd change
1t all for boyhood's charms
London Tribune.
The ''magnate' of the Webster City. Iowa, tele-
Dl,o {a
ster Ctys regular doctors boycotted the telephone
company account of rates The result was this
advertisement:
WANTED.-The addresses of two or three pood
physicians who wish to locate in this city. either
on their own hook or upon a good salary Cali or
phone at my expense. z. H MARTIN.
Webster City, Iowa
Mr. Martin owns one of the best business
blocks in the city. and purposes to place his
henchmen in luxurious suites. He announces that
he will dictate the scale fees to all the doctors
who accept his offer of salary III our telephona
rates high, what of the doctors bIIls?' he has
remarked sarcastically. Tine rates which these
men are charging exorbitant. and I'll make
them cut rates or leave town"
Miss Passay-You weren't at the ball last night.
Miss Passay-Yes ard Jack Dasher said was
the youngest looking girl there.
MISS Pert-l didn't know ii was masquerade
Houston Post
The Teutonc advertiser is not always happv IN
the inducements he offers. ANY person who can
prove that my cocoa is injurious to health" so
runs the challenge In German paper. will re-
ceve boxes OF the same gratis"
Papa-Is the teacher satisfied with you?
Toby-Oh. quite
Papa-Did he tell you so?
To6y-fes: after close examination he said to
you would shut up my school this yeTy we're day Ae
That shows that know enough.-Indanapoiis Star
novel race was introduced at a Madras fair 7,
was handicap of all animals bred In the conn,r,
the competitors including buffaoes elenhants
goat. ram. emu. elk, besides ponies and borsas
The elephants were placed IL moving ir a ,a.
riage procession. and went over the conrsa -. =
quick walk The ram and goat ridden H., I,t,l
boys. ran we'll and the bufaloes went n, ooa
gallop but the emu would stir ne,ha- -,
the elk, until the end of the race when =, 80
fright and darted down the course at sraa, -.
Finally ram was the winner horse eon,,ns q,
second. and a buffalo third "
and his closehess In money matters sent FOR ~,
lection TO a brother lawyer in a neighboring cite
note for a considerable amount, which had ba
given for Zee, This was. In due course sue5 ~,
and collected, according To Case and C'ornment
ard the run amount Temitted charge helm,
made because u was for a LAWYER The IatfaS
acknowledging the check added a quaint testi.
monfal OF appreciation of the services rendered IN
the p. s; Bug yourself a good box OF clsarsi III