davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20
ONLY A DREAM
san Francisco Chronicle.

''AH EldllClNtu 'NINilCtts
4 Russian journalist has had a
dream IN which he saw the japanese
descending on the United States and
treating them pretty much as the Rus
slams were dealt with In eastern Asia.
NO doubt our Slavic contemporary
would Ike 20 Gee his vision realized.
but we assure him that what he hopes
for Is not likely to come TO pass. The
same sagacity which enabled the
japanese TO divine the rottenness Of
the Russian army and navy and act
upon their discovery viii keep them
from laundering IN the case Of the
United States, which, by the way, has
no AIMS likely TO conflict with the
plans Of the island empire.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

Lillian Moog Of New York and her
friends believe that her heart has
jumped over from the left to the right
side. There lie nothing strange In that
She has simply experienced change
OF heart a common occurrence.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

People do not care much whether the
man Swallowed by the Canadian police
is Stensland or not. but they are deeply
interested In knowing who the hand
some brunette ACCOMMODATING him is.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

80 bottom Secretary Bonaparte's sug-
rest0ns show sound sense. that b. In
50 Gar as he would punish the anarchist
severely for any crimes in which he
may participate bul would not en-
crosch on his flghi Of free speech. His
feeling that by the lnnlction ~ cruel
punishment society caa get some re-
Nenge on the anarchist. once he Is en-.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

It Is said that a child can be ident-
fed by lis thumb mark from the era
die TO the grave. II may be but old
fashioned people still cling 20 the
strawberry mark.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

mean annexation. Our influence Is o.
a moral nature. not imperlalistic. And
10 exericse that influence In all the
world Is a mission this country cannot
shirk without betraying a sacred
ffugt
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

That fellow leaning against the
signpost over there. said hypercriti-
cal guest. rs boasting that he Is the
most enterprising man IN town He
has been drinking. ! Judge" "Yape,"
nonchalantly replied the landlord Of
the Polkville (ArkD tavern, He most
generally has. Tha's Roderick Dhu
SNiggs. When a common. everyday
man drinks too much too long. he Is
liable 10 see a few snakes and such
tribes. but the last time Roderick Dhu
Sviggs had the delirium tremens he
beheld procession OF 1909 red geese
and ganders paradln' past him, and
every goose carried parasol. and
every gander was smokin' a cigarette;
and II that amt enterprise. Ia know
what you cali lt"-Puck
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

An association Of British scientists
SAYS Don't cut your sleep short''
KIDS have always been contending
for that principle.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

4 man In New York was so fright
ened by savage bulldog that he died.
A man might as well be killed as scar
ID 20 death.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20
Making the Binds Meei.

Every day IL becomes harder 10 IN
dersiand where 'gentlemen's agree
ment' ends and rogues conspiracy
begins kansas City star.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20
JUST FOR FUN.
Her pre.Butteriiy Career.

Now that the worship Of baby. as a
fad. has supplanted plain cooking and
pearls In Newport. the rivalry among
the m1trons to tell amusing yarns IN
which their infants have the center
OF the stage is becoming keen. one can
never be sure about tho veraclousness
Of children's stories, OF course, but I'M
less one is oyerdeyeloped as a truth
seeker, there is no need 10 worry over
the tales. on a cottage yeranda the
other day several women were discus
sing their cherubs. and one of the par
ly said Last Sunday my little girl
and ] were sitting IN church together
when she pulled al my sleeve. Mama
she whispered. is this the church
whore | chryslallized? New York
Press
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

Travellers 20 Coney Island are still
having trouble with the Brooklyn
Rapid Transit The company says that
all is fare IA love and war
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

Next time he holds a military re-
view. Grand Duke Nicholas would pre-
fer to draw a blank
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20
Tie TactfuI Barber.

DO you shave yourself sir?"
None OF your business"
Il was only going 10 say. sir that
IT'S done as well as any professional
could do &C."
THAT netted him au extra tip
i suppose YOU are enjoying your
vacation
Yes" answered the member Of Con-
gress. II is something OF a relief to
have a real excuse for not doing any
thing Washington Star
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

Medical authorities now agree that
man over forty should never run for
a street car
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

The Shah OF Persia Is IN very poor
health His trouble at present is con-
stitutional"
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

To future generations the present
time may be known as the era Of pub
he opinion.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

One reason why laws are not en-
forced is that public officials often
don't like work.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

The rain descended and the floods
came and the streets were filled with
mud.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

10 would pay the Gar 20 hire a few
bands Of terrorists TO fight the terror
lists
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

Mrs MISUNDERSTANDING / wish my
Mile wasn't 50 reserved
Mrs Jellers-Why / haven't heard Of
her having been SO reserved. Who is
the young man?-Chicago Tribune
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

Even the muzzle Of gun isn't fully
effective 10 muzzle the Russian press
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

one shake " nature makes san
Francisco and Valparaiso twins
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20
He Was Wise.

Teacher-"There is many slip
twiXt the cup and the lip
Tommy Wise-Den ! guess dat's de
reason dat so many people use straws,
amt it,
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

Two women in the crowded car car
riei ON am animated discussion. sud.
denly the train slowed down. and m
the hush the voices became audible to
everybody
Your parrot may De "a better talker
than mine. although don't believe In"
sara one Of the women with an air Of
presenting the hnal argument but
youil nave 10 admit that mine has the
most beautiful foliage. "-Ex
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20
pEsERET EVENING NEWS. MONDAY AUGUST 20 1906

take like risk for the sake Of. say. a
pleasure trip across the channel IN a
machine that might at any moment be
merged In the waves
These are weghty reasons against
the crude craft that now is called "a
Tying machine. But II. in time. these
machines are perfected 30 that they
can rise Ike birds. soar at viii. and
descend gracefully without DANCE TO
life and limb they will. undoubtedly,
become popular And why should It not
be possible 70 construct a craft on the
model OF birds3 Possibly, In a combi-
nation OF the balloon and the aeropIane
principles. some future inventor win
find the solution .of the problem that
now confronts aeronauts. u is 10 De
sincerely hoped however that the per-
feet aeroplaue Nill not De made until
the danger of using 10 as an engine Of
war is past because wars are abolished.
since the existing engines Of destruc-
ton aye already diaboiila. enough They
do not need auy additional terrors such
as a perfect dying machine would De-.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

More people lead the slmpIeton than
the simple life
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20
Base f1attery

First B8rber-Hou did you ever get
q Zip out OF that old baldhead2
Second Bafher--l asked him II he
wanted his hair cut also.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-08-20

An old gentleman Of pronounced Tee
lgious views wished 10 have cut over
the door of "a new house the text. Nv
house shall be- called house OF
prayer lie left the workmen 10 carry
out his wishes during his absence. ami
on ms return his horror was great 10
ind the quotation completed. but We
have made n den ~ thieves" We
had O wee thing mair room. We see 50
We iust pit iu the end o. the verse '
was The explanation given by the
B|hlc-loyIug Scot Tx
Perth Amboy evening news., 1906-08-15

and difference of opinion raised to
show that the wisdom of the water
board in agreeing to pay the Foun-
tains $4,000 for the land was ques-
tionable.
Since the hearing yesterday, how
ever, the side of the taxpayers be-
comes all the more favorable. While
the testimony does not directly
charge it, it infers that from the time
the city secured a site for the water
works in Madison township the Foun-
tains have been making all the trou-
BILE possible, purely in an effort to gel
money out of Perth Amboy.
Commissioner Voorhees, gave in
teresting testimony along this line.
He declared almost at the outset of
the hearing that the trouble at Run
yon was caused principally by AS
bury Fountain and H. II. Brown, a
relative of the Fountains, who was
road superintendent. He seems to
have shown up Fountain in his true
light when he testified: "Mr. Foun-
tain said he had influence with the
assessors and could fix it with them,
as they were friends of his, and if any
objections were made by the people
he would tell them it was too late to
fix matters now"
Former Commissioner Mccullough
also told some interesting things
about the way this man Fountain
tried to get money out of the city.
Yet the water board was going to give
him $15,5000 for land which was as
at a little over $100l
James G. Rossi, who may be IN
sidered an expert, testified that the
land was not needed by the city at all.
This testimony can readily be accept
ed by the people.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1906-08-15
Things we 10 to be uncomfortable because some mysterious intangible being says it's the fashion

Union and is growing more important
every year; that it is in a good posi-
ton to engage in foreign commerce,
but it's facilities for doing SO are con-
fined to a single bay at its extreme
northern end; that its relations with
neighboring states and with what di-
plomats would call its ''hinterland'
are such that a great portion of the
commerce of the United States would
be facilitated by ; giving it a deep
water port somewhere about midway
of it's length, to which the transcon-
tinental railways would be extended
Immediately.
The demand for such a port is like
ly to grow more insistent every year,
and even the completing of the pro-
jected harbor at Cape May, with a
maximum depth oIot0 feet and ~jetties
running out-threezq1tarters of a mile
into the ocean will not satisfy it in all
respects. Something still more COM
~prehensive and nearer to the track of
New York bound commerce seems to
be wanted.-Philadelphia Bulletin.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1906-08-15
EDITORIAL COMMENT.
New Jersey Harbors.

Shall New Jersey have a seaport
New Jersey, of course, says yes. The
| Navy Department says no-and at
| present the War Department has the
veto w Under present. law, no
engineering work of any kind can be
done along the coast, whether of New
Jersey or any other state, without
the recount endation of the chief of
engineers and the approval of the
Secretary of War. Congress was ask
| ed last year to give the state of New
Jersey some aid in clearing out its
system of inlets and small bays, to
make them available for the oyster
trade, If nothing more, and h mat
ter was referred to the War Depart
ment, which replied that, according
to its estimate, the work would cost
$500, 900 900 and would not pay.
If the War Department was right
in its premise, it was correct in its
conclusion. 1t would not pay to ex-
pend $500, 0O0. 900 for the benefit OF
the Jersey oystermen; but there are
others than the oystermen to be con-
sidered. There is a project-in the
air at present, but liable to be
brought to earth and given shape at
some later time-to dig a ship canal
o dCl Ooo wow oNAoSS
to some appropriate place on the At
lantic coast, and there construct a
commodious harbor for shipping
something like the Delaware Break
water, and much for the same pur-
poses. That scheme commends itself
to all who do not consider the cost.
Perhaps it will commend itself also
to those who cinsider the cost, but
compare 1t with the profit.
The aggregate value of the ships
and cafgoes annually lost on the
coast Of New Jersey would pay the
interest on a very large amount of
capital that might be employed in
building a harbor- of refuge. The
sands of that. eoast-are-always SHIFT
ing. Every big storm makes changes
in the waterline and in the character
of the bottom along shore, often clos
ing bays and inlets even to the light
craft of the FISHERMAN and forming
shadows so far out that they catch
vessels unawares; while the frequent
heavy fogs make such a harbor wne1e
ships could anchor and await cleAi
weather especially desirable.
A ship canal to philadelphia Wouuu
certainly be a most desirable art "
this scheme, and that It Would pay
has been demonstrated by the logic o.
figures over and Q again pnt y
noad not be considered a. Inns TINE.
Tho argument 4 present + that z
Jersey Is an important stA1e " lle
Perth Amboy evening news., 1906-08-15
FIRE ALARM BOXES.

23-Raritan Copper Works.
26-High and Lewis streets.
81 Madison avenue and Paterson street.
28-Market and First streets.
35-Smith and High streets.
37-State and Smith streets.
43-Buckingham ave. and Hartford 81
45-Commerce and Front streets.
- and Washington streets.
64-State st. and Buckingham ave.
56-Hayy avenue and Charles street.
57-State and Wayne streets.
62-Washington and First streets.
S8-New Brunswick ave, and Elm st.
B4-Smith street and Watson avenue.
66-Commerce and State streets.
72-Front and Smith streets.
73-Water and Gordon streets.
74-Kearny avenue and Gordon street,
82-Smith and Herbert streets:
83-Woodbridge road and Washington ST.
84-Lehigh avenue and Stanford street.
To send In an alarm, open the door OF
the box and pull down the lever and let
go, once only. Stay at box until firemen
arrive.
SPECIAL CALLS.
/ tap=Break in circuit. 2 taps-Drill
and fire alarm test. 3 taps-Fire out. b
taps-Police call. 12-Calls. for Lincoln
Engine Company. 1S-Call for Washing
ton Hose. 14-Call for Mcclellan Engine
Company. 15-Call for Protection Hook
and Ladder. 16-CaH for Eagle Hose
Company.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1906-08-15

(From the Paterson Guardian.)
In commenting upon the cowardly
attempt of the republican state boss.
| es to blacken the character. of George
l.. Record, through the medium Of
Pilferer Payne and the riparian
board, the Hoboken Observer says:
Every one of the charges, serious
sor trivial, except one, which the Sec
rotary OF the State Riparian Board,
with the assistance of the attorney
general, has sought to make against
George l.. Record, reflects with great
er force upon the four members OF
the board itself.
Every republican member of the
committee is Records political enc
my. Most of them he is asking the
republican party to retire to private
life and fighting in their home coun-
ties.
Acknowledgement McCarter, who is
conducting the inquiry, belongs to a
has on more than one occasion.
shown its hatred of the corporation
counsel of Jersey City.
Prior meetings of the committee
were held, but practically nothing
was done. Though Payne's testimony
shows that he has been preparing
himself a long time in advance, he
was not called until Record had left
the state. Then two session were
held in rapid succession before Rec
ord could get back.
Payne's testimony shows bitten an
imosity toward Record. He admits
that he broke into Records desk and
took out and had photographed one
OF the stubs of Records checkbook.
After taking Payne's testimony,
which was full of inuendoes and
which attempted to saddle upon Rec
ord the responsibility for acts which,
right or wrong, were plainly the acts
of the board, the Legislative commit
tee suddenly adjourned for the sum
mer without either giving Record a
chance to be heard or eve calling
the commissioners of the board itself,
who are now obliged, in their own
defense, to go into the newspapers
for vindication.
This testimony of Payne's, full OF
statements President Cloke has de-
lied, and of spleen, is ordered print
ed. Twenty thousand copies of it are
to be distributed prior to the primar-
les at which the members OF the
committee and Record will meet in
better fight.
But it is clear that explanations
are due, not from Record alone, but
from every member of the Riparian
Board and from the men who served
on it during the past thirteen years
and have since retired from office
The accusations against the boarC
are accusations against the state
Perth Amboy evening news., 1906-08-15
a lesson to Wives.

your husband" said the neighbors
to Mrs. Christopher Columbus, has
gone to- discover AnEerica?"
That's what he Said" replied Mrs.
Columbus with al air of suspicion.
But when you have been married as
long as | you will know better than
to believe everything a man says"
1t is a pity that Mrs. Columbus could
not have been spared to the world for
a few centuries. Her advice, based on
experience, might have smoothed
many a road.-Judge.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1906-08-15
e. 2

Vice Chancellor Pitney gets the tes-
timony next Tuesday and after he has
considered it he will decide whether
or not the water board can make the
deal. 1t seems hardly possible, in the
light of what has been brought out
that it will be carried through. The
next course for the water board, If it
is still deemed necessary to have the
land in question, is to condemn it and
buy it at a reasonable figure.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1906-08-15
WEDNESDAY, AUGUST Is.
THINK 1T OVER"

Local assessors, in almost every
locality, are reporting that they are
having trouble with the railroad
y property. They state that sidings,
wlRftches, and the like, which they
'ly 4 inerIy assessed locally, are now in
Lsed in the first class property as II
Thrt of the main stem, and are to be
assessed by the state board and the
money turned over { o the state.
Give this mattera little thought. 1t
shows that the railroads T. deter
mined not to pay a cent more in
taxes than they formerly did and the
''machinc" has so arranged things
that they can easily escape.
The order has gone forth to all To-
cal assessors to assess at full value.
The second class railroad property is
included in this.
With a high valuation the tax rate
will be low. The first class railroad
property is assessed by the state
board of assessors and its rate is fixe1
by securing an average of all the To-
cal rates i'm the state. Therefore
with a high valuation the average
FAX Pate will be low, making the tax
on the first class railroad property
Mw.
The object of the railroads in talk
ing ms much of their property as they
dare from the second class, which is
assessed locally at full value, and
placing it with the first class, which
is assessed ut the average tax rate Of
the state by the state board, bercmes
evident.
The NEWS stated before that the
equal taxation bill, as passed by the
last legislature, was a gold brick. Ii
IA intended to fool the people with
put harming the corporations which
control present legislation.
The only true equal taxation is
that as proposed by the Colby move
ment, and Alexander II. Forlvoc,
Jr., a candidate for the nomination
for state senator in this county, is
pledged to that.
See that you vote for his delegates
at the primaries September 20.
Think it over.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1906-08-15

liousness, Sick Headache and all those
diseases arising from a Torpid Liver, has
been discovered by DR.. Oldham, and his
prescription is known as Liv-r-oids.
We ourselves know that Liv-r-oids will
the worst forms Of constipation and
all the dangerous diseases of the Bowels
and Liver, which are such a great men
ace to life. If you have never tried Liv-r'
odds before, we will send absolutely
free to every one sending name and ad
dress, a 20 cent bottle of this great rem
|edy. Liv-r-oids make you feel right, AM
make you look on the bright side Of life
Perth Amboy evening news., 1906-08-15
NEW YORK HERALD WEATHER
FORECAST.

In the Middle States and New Eng
land today, fair to partly overcast
weather and slowly rising tempera-
ture will prevail, with light and fresh
variable winds, followed by local
rains in the southern and mountain
districts of this section. On Thurs
day fair to partly cloudy, warmer
weather will prevail, with light and
fresh variable winds, followed by To-
cal thunderstorms, and on Friday
partly cloudy weather, with slightly
lower temperature and local rains.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1906-08-15

Yes, Fordyce has announced him
self against Dryden for the United
States senate. Nobody wants Dryden
at Washington except the corpora
lions, and what they want is directly
opposite what the people want. Col.
Fordyce has won votes by his declar-
alton.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1906-08-15

Liv-r-oids are not a patent medicine but
an eminent physicians prescription in
tablet form formula on bottle. There is
no element Of do1bt In the curing power
of Liv-r-oids. iEhey are not a miracle,
but only science working along on nat
to try Liv-r-oids to-day, they sell at 25c.
before, send your name and address and
you will receive a fuii-sized bottle free
no obligations-nothihg TO p~ay-merely
recommend them to your friends # they
do what We olaiu. The Vic Chemical
Co. Chicago III. Aaln q 10
Perth Amboy evening news., 1906-08-15

One band concert, at least. That's
good. If you want to hear more of
them, send in a dollar or two. 1t is
for a good cause, and will be doing
your neighbor a favor at the same
time.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1906-08-15
"New Lamns for DID,

Such was the cry of Aladdin.
Something you want for something
you have that you have ceased to
need" is the slogan of the "For Elk
change" Department of the Thriee-a-
Week World. With its 100, 900 read
ers, scattered all over the United
States, it's For Exchange" column is
just the thing. Write for rates. Cost
small-result great.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1906-08-15
MORE INTERESTING TESTIMONY.

More interesting facts were fur
nished the taxpayers at the hearing
on the proposed water board deal yes
terday morning. After the previous
hearing the NEWS ventured the opin-
ion that the people, who are back of
Judge Lyon in the investigation,
would be justified in their action ev-
en- fftt-r vtr1 chancellor allowed tho
deal to be closed at the present fig
ure. There has been enough doubt
Perth Amboy evening news., 1906-08-15
A New story By F. n. Benson.

The famous author Of "Dodo,"
which a few years ago set the reading
world agog, has written a new novel
especially for The Sunday World,
which begins September. 1t is entit-
led The House of Defense" This
story will be printed in illustrated
Perth Amboy evening news., 1906-08-15

Professor-Did you examine the bee
before you swallowed it? Was it a
humble bee or a yellow jacket?
Student (moaning dismally)-I-I
couldn't see, sir, but it acts like a very
husky bee.
Professor-You should say husking
hea nv child.