The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1906-08-16
BY THE WAY


but Bryan and any old name will be
sure to promise some kind of cir
Gus.
The negro bishop who referred to
America as the vestibule of hell
should be taken and admonished not
to go any farther. Washington Post.
Better urge him to go all the way.
Several of the II or 18 different fac
tions of the Democratic party in Chi
cago are already figuring on how they
can use Mr.. Bryan to advertise them
selves.
Cincinnati has indicted the men,
bers of its laundry trust, and is pre-
pairing to clean them up. Secretary
Taft's attempt to break the solid
South will probably end like those
numerous attempts to break the bank
of Monte Carlo.
Anyway Mr.. Bryan must admit that
this country gets along much better
on one leg than the Democratic mule
does on four.
Mr.. j. &. Phelps Stokes, apparent
ly, like the young Mr.. Patterson, has
tired of Socialism of the "skin deep"
variety, and now wants the real thing.
cit was merely little mistake"
says France TO Captain Dreyfus. "The
Joke is on me. "
A Kansas City ice man testif1es that
he went into business with 5000, and
the following season made $45, 900.
Evidently, the Toledo fellows wanted
to beat this record.
Il -
gart, of Indiana, to decide whether he
will run the Democratic party or the
gambling joint at French Lick
Springs.
John d. Rockefeller is going to
write Eook. Is this the beginning of
the Authors trustY
Taft says that he doesn't want the
presidential plum. It's green now,
just wait until it ripens.
Save your money and buy Panama
canal bond. They are said to be as
pretty as pictures.
A Cleveland paper tells i-s readers
that there is no excuse for idleness
now. The editor ought to hear some
Of the short stories listened to by the
women who take in washing to sup.
port their husbands.
Whatever else may happen to his
reputation, Harry Thaw is now in a
fair way to escape the terrible dis
grace of dying rich.
Colonel Bryan intimates that he
stands just about where he did in
1896 and 1900 1t will be remembered
that he stood just outside the White
House gate in those years.
FSecretary Wilson surprised Cedar
Rapids firm Of packers bv dropping in
unexpectedly for an official inspec-
tion. lie found nothing to criticise.
Cedar Rapids is in Iowa.
If it is true thas Thaw once bet
100000 on a pair of jacks, Mr.. Je-
rome might as we'll go to sleep for
that insanity plea will hold.
As we consider the Dreyfus case,
we are led up to the conclusion that
all things come to him who fights.
Several chorus ladies have not yet
been mentioned In connection with
the Thaw case, but the tIial cannot
take place until October, so they need
not despair.
"Wm. Randol h Hearst refuses
the presidency" says New York
evening newspaper 81 cannot wed
you my pretty maid. Nobody
asked you sir, " she said.
Saws the Chicago Record Herald !:
ave feel safe, however, in assuring
the public that English walnuts are
comparatively clean. Yes, they are
grown in France.
Haywood, the Socialist who is in Jail
in Idaho for murder, has been nomi-
mated by that party as their candidate
or governor of Colorado. Evidently
they want to know where their can
didate is.
Mr.. Bryan is touring Scotland in
an automobile, but then he does not
expect to run for president in Scot
land.
1t will be a hard day for the Gar
when all the little revolutions scat
tered through Russia succeed in af-
fecting merger.
Presumably Pittsburg has another
sensation matching to take the place
of the Hartje case as soon as 1t Is I'm
ished.
Why was Thomas Taggart so
shocked at being shown up as a gam
bier? Nobody else was.
Secretary Shaw should not run
away with the notion that he has
done anything original by discover
ing the shortage Of small bills.
Senator Tillman is scheduled for a
few speeches in Iowa, and all the far
mers are hoping he will bring the
pitchfork with him, as theirs are all
In use.
In the meantime David B. Hill con-
tinues making a noise like Woltert e
rooster gone to rest.
II. Clay Evans says he is very fond
of Joint debates, and possibly Tom
Taggart would have better liking
for them too, if the talking would
turn to some other fellows joint.
Col. Bryan expresses surprise that
the United States has made such pro.
gress on one leg. Still the Colone
has done pretty we'll on the stump
himself.
"God will not look you over fol
medals, degrees and diploms, but fol
scars" SAYS Elbert Hubbard. There
ought to be a crumb of comfort II
this for the man who owns an auto
mobile
Count Boni is failure as an ora
tor, partly because he got into th'
habit of letting his wife's money d.
all the talking.
"You may gamble on Tom Tag
gart," his friends have always said
Nobody disputes the statement now
A Londoner has paid $4,000 TO
some old pre- Shskespearean plays
But that's nothing to what "Flora
dora" cost White and ThAw.
Mrs. Cassie Chadwick pleads for
simple little Paris gown, with hat :,
match. She doesn't like the prison
summer styles in stripes.
Soliloquy of the Gar: Would tha
my generals had had half the desper
nnopnhtcku ~