The Birmingham age-herald., 1906-03-25
Cleveland Man Was Gorgeous.

well, TOT SIfhBlt-Out SOrReOuSneSS, that Cleveland cuss had the lilies of the field all pulled up by the roots. He was living like d New York banker in Mont real and said he done 1t with his little vial. Told me he quit the brass-knuck method, because every time he caved in cocoanut 1t got on his nerves so to hear it crack that he had to consult a physician Said too, that holdin' a man down when you cross-examined his cloth ing compelled a diversion of attention that operated detrimentally to the at tainment of the ultimate object. That's the way the old sport put it, opened his false teeth and handed it right out like that; anyhow, I know you're mighty H. able to overlook bet when you've got ts keep one hand on a mans gullet while you're making tour of his pockets. Even if you soothe him to sleep with sIung- shot, he's liable to wake up and ask em- barrasslng questions
 'The man of the reformed life was so enthusiastic over his drowsy-drops that 1 caught the fever, and, on the square, you couldn't praise 1t too high for use in removing the watch and poeketbook nolselessly and without pain to the feel ings. He learned me all about the ltl- tie joker which he was on such intimate terms with that he called it by it's first name. chloral. But l always gave 1t all that was coming to it, and called 1t by its full name, chloral hydrate. l can re- call even now that when a man was sop- py 15 grains in his next drink would put him to sleep as gently as his mamma did. But when the patient was a sober, hard-jawed citizen, with no more nerves than a logarithm, l think il was that Cleveland chemist used to say, then it was 50 grains for the first dose, and re- peat as often as you could get him to drink, until relieved of everything about him worth taking.
 Went Out for Practice.
 'Well, pretty soon the professor took me out for little field practice. he call ed 1t. We wandered into a big hotel, where a rustic graybeard while buying a plug Of tobacco, unearthed from a red bandana a roll of bills painfully large to see under control of another man. My instructor said he was a fine subject for pathological experiment, which l guess ed meant in Cleveland lingo he was a jay just in off the ranch. It did look to me like a fine chance to roll canary. Roll canary? Don't know what that means? That's A professional term of milking mice What. don't know what milking mice is? l thought everybody knew that meant touching a stranger. Where've you been raised?
 "Twasn't long before we were all slt- ting down to q quiet little supper in private ulnlng-foOln, ana while the pro- lessor was showing the toxicowhstyou- callem the house across the street that Daniel Boone or Daniel Webster or may be 1t was Daniel and the lions lived in, I slipped a fifty-grain jolt of the knock out drops into the old jays cocktail? Wat? Sure. The foxy man, the farmer fellow, was with us, of course Get him there? That was easy. As the professor and l crowded through q doorway with i'm afr DrpfegSOl'S looked just like the farmer, my foot ac- cidentally y-went through il. Then 1t was apologies and Oh, never mind . and all that. See? That's the way We wound up in the private dining room.
 'sThe old fellow licked up his drink so kindly that ] could see myself spending that wad. 1 looked him over for prac- tice. and remembering my knockout drop catechIsm sized him up AS needing ahout one more dose to put him in the proper frame of mind. So il was one more drink and orfs more dope for him. Then 1t was