davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1906-05-18
rroubls in tho Air

FROM BuCK.
First Ar Ship Owner-'Hare
trouble reaching Mars?" 'sl
Second Air Ship Owner-"None ~.
mentioning. l was fined four or five ~ Ia
for scorching on the Milky Way, ana Y
for looping the loop one one Of Satin.
rings, but that was ALL" t
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1906-05-18

fog fifteen years
/ had kidney trou-
bleS. and though L
~doctored faithfully,
could not find a cure.
l had heavy back
aches, dizzy head
and terrible uri-
nary disorders. One
day / collapsed, fell
insensihle on the side
walk. and then vast
ed away in bed for ten
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1906-05-18
Love'a Youno Dream.

FrOm Tho New York Weekly.
Little Girl-at school-"What did the
teacher send you here for?'
Little Boy-"Shc said l was bad, and
must come over and sit with the girls
II like you. Can you stay long,"
Guess not. l wasn't very bad"
Wei, you DC Bladder next time
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1906-05-18
Down on the Old Man

From the Atchison Globe
The children are always glad thar f,n
didn't marry his first love, being perfeas
satisfied with their mother, but tbey "
ways have a notion they would have ~
better of il mother had married hers
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1906-05-18
a ouestion Anxwerad.

Lecturer-who intends 10 trace the origii
Of certain dishes and give their historical
signincancc-"Now. ladies and gentlemen.
many OF you viii doubtless hn surprised
at the question / am about TO ask: Why
do we cat mincc pie2"
voicc-from a dyspeptic looking auditor
-sIccausc we are fools
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1906-05-18
Prepared for Trouble.

From the New York Tribune.
Dora Hope-Are you prepared for
anything that papa may say when you
ask him?
Kleen Gawn-Yes, dear, or anything,
he may do. / have taken out a $4,000
tcciGent insurance policy.
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1906-05-18
WASTED 10 a SHADOW.

lat Found a Cure AFTER FirtccL
Years Of SUFFERING.
a, III. SIotts. messenger at the
State CAPITOL Columbus, Ohio, says;
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1906-05-18
a Positive
CURE
Ely's Cream Balm

Gives Relief at Once.
1t c~Ieanses, soothes
heals and protects
tho diseased men,
brane. 1t cures Ca
tarh and drives
away = Cold in the
Head auickly. Re.
storss tho Senses Of
Taste and Smell. r
g.s's o. by mail TT
lily brothers. % W
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1906-10-15
UTAH COAL LAND
MAY BE RELEASED
Continued from Page 1

ident will call the existing evils to the
attention of congress, and I presume this
is true. 1t will lie with congress to de-
termine what shall be done.
Those who have best considered the
subject believe that the present law
should be practically wiped out; and then
under careful supervision. provided for
by some reasonable legislation, a small
royalty for coal be collected for the ben
eft of the government, and that adequate
tracts of coal territory, commensurate
with the proposed operations. be leased to
coal operators. These operators would be
held TO strict account not to form COM
binations, trusts or monopolies or to
charge prices savoring of exorbitance, to
the detriment of the public.
Interested parties have already raved
against this plan the cutlery of social
ISM but this is merely the methods used
by the most enlightened governments of
the civilized world today in the distribu-
ton of their properties.
I'm speaking thus. l do not wish to
imply that / have the special confidence
of any officer of the government nor the
power of predicting what congress shall
do. / am out here merely doing my part
in a remedial way for the recovery of
land unjustly acquired and for the pre-
vention of further incursions on the pub
lie domain"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1906-10-15
ANECDOTES. CONCERNING
WELL KNOWN PEOPLE
washington Star.
Monotony of the Country.

Major c. i. McCawieS. the social
aid of the White House. Said at a din
ner apropos of country vacations:
For country VACATIONS 1 have no
great liking. They talk of the quietude
and calm OF country life, but / have
founds the noise of a farm so dreadful
as to sbanish sleep. Ducks quack all
night long. From on to daylight cock
crows to cock by the dozen over a ra-
dius of miles. Cows low and below
Horses neigh and stamp thunderously
in their stalls. Dogs bark. Cats wall
and Shrek.
Undoubtedly, summer night on a
country farm is nOisier than a summer
night on the Bowery or in Coney ISL
and. Oh, the noise of the country, and,
oh. the lack of interest, the dull mo-
notony therei
II once went to the country to spend
a week on a cousins farm. 1 turned in
the first night about 10, but the dogs
and cats, the ducks and roosters, the
COWS and horses kept me awake. /
think, 1teiI about 4.
"After'f or So as the gray dawn
came on, the farm animals discontinued
their racket and 1 fell asleep. But this
sleep that so much needed had hardly
descended upon me when my friends,
fully dressed FASTENED into my room.
up with your lazybonesr they
shouted. Out of that, or you'll be too
Later
I'm a comatose condition / leaped
from the bed, shaved, bathed and
dressed, while my country hosts urged
me to greater and greater speed.
LAS my dressing neared It's compile
ton and my senses became acuter /
began TO wonder what was the use of
all this hurry, and l said:
What's up, anyway? rs something
going on?
Sure they said impatiently. The
coal boat passes the wharf in four min
utes.'
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1906-10-15

think luther than foneticaliy. he will b
ruld out in darkest disgrase-
How about dough. and doe. and do?''
9ger interrupted tn irepresibl luVer ov silent
vowls and aksented sylabls:
NeVr mind them, replied tn adVo-
kate. Don't nc anything about kon-
text? They can fingered out bi tn
kontext just tn sam az is often necessary
now"
Won't it b gran. tho? queried tn ad-
vokate, dreemily.
IVY, Jus imajin tn literachure ov fu-
turity in its nu garb and literachure ov
tn past rjtten nu. Think ov that com
pelin frazc frum Burns Tam o'Shanter:'
For pleZureZ p lik popies spred:
L grasp tn bloom and tn flour is ded;
Or Xix the snowfall in tn river,
Won moment wife, then gon forevr.
How impreSiV il lukS,
Then, think of IN beautiful dictlOn
clothed thus, witch wuz prompted bi hiz
peruzal of Shenstone:
'Ov awl tn numrus lis that hurt our
That press the sowI or ring TN mind with
anguish,
Byond comparison tn worst r those
That to owr own folly or guilt we oW:
Won't Bryant'S ThanatOpSis look 12ne
that way? How about Shakespeare rit-
ten foneticaly2 How about Miss Proctor?
She haz both rime and recon in her poms,
and wher they r brot out foneticaly
they will B inded perfec. And there's Ella
WHEELER Wilcox. She's great on progress
ivnes. We surtinly viii hav friend in her.
Then
Well sed tn luver ov roots and
stems. Il don't Xix tn, idea-'SpoZe
Don't bothr me now: I've no tim to
B interrupted with Ur nonsens. line think
in ov the CRATE fuchur in stor for owr
statesmen. Listen to John Sharp Villains
for 4 vile:
:" Mr. Speaker-It IL with a telling ov
mingled regret and satisfactshun that |
riZe this mOrnin to sa in most postlv
terms that everybody is a lyer. Lyers.
all lyers an / only kan spoke tn truth
Then, there's Ben Tilman Wy, If Ben
TiIman IL permitted 10 spoke fonetlcaly
and think foneticaly and rite foneticaly
everybody els, in tn Janus wurds of
Grover Clevlan. vii relapS into a state
ov inocuous deswetude.
Then think how much betr HobSon
Guild fife if he wer permitted TO do so
foneticaly. r
But tn advokate got no furthr. Tn luv-
er oV elongated Spelin. Outragd and beatn.
hurled frum his presens, vile tn advokate
yield after him:
Wei 1 kan think foneticaly and l want
~Thre chores and a tiger for Precedent
Rusefelt"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1906-10-15
Comment as to critchIow.

Judge Burch was asked as to the sig
nificance of the appointment of r. B.
Critchlow as special assistant district at
torney for the prosecution of the coal
land cases.
Mr.. Critchlow has been retained as
special counsel for the government he
said Politics had nothing whatever TO
do with il. The government retained Mr..
Crftchlow because of his high standing at
the bar in Utah to assist in carrying on
the important cases now pending against
the Utah Fuel company and the Pleasant
Valley Coal company. The district at
torney. Mr.. Booth, will also be connected
with the cases, as will Fred A. Maynard.
special assistant attorney general of the
United States. who has been engaged for
some time IN Utah in the preparation of
these cases. l expect to be out here
more or less myself also. and there will
be plenty of work for ALL
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1906-10-15

at the Lyric Theatre last evening. The
play deals with the period during and at
the close Of the civil war and the parts
are for the most part well taken and the
interest sustained throughout. The lead
was in the hands OF H b. Varpenter as
Robert Hampton. a fugitive through a
miscarriage OF justice, out all comes right
in the end and at the finish every body
is happy
Interest however, centered largely in
the work of Chris Moran as Tom Cort-
land a student of anatomy with an over
whelming desire TO make a study of the
rkvsical makeup of everyone with whom
he comes into contact. Some of the sit
uations were ludicrous and Mr.. Moran
received several enthusiastic encores
The part or Ruth Hampton. Roberts
Blind sister, was well taken by Miss Rose
Wilbur and w. w. Buttner as Corporal
Dumont. veteran of The Mexican War,
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1906-10-15
FIERCE RIOT At
FRENCH RACES
Unsatisfactory Start in the
Free Handicap Resented
by Angry Crowd.
GRAND STAND SET ON FIRE
MANY PEOPLE INJURED-SIXTY
ARRESTS MADE.
GRAND STAND SET ON FIRE

Paris. Oct. 14-There were violent
public demonstrations at the Long
champs race course this afternoon in
consequence of an unsatisfactory start
in the free handicap. The trouble cul-
minated in riots, pillage and incen-
diarism. Many persons were arrested
The program comprised six races
and the first two passed off without
incident. There were nine starters in
the free handicap, the next event, and
four, including the favorite, were left
at the post. Amid a terrible uproar a
complete outsider won.
Invaded the Track.
The public Immediately became en-
raged, broke down the barriers and
Invaded the track Crowds demanded
the return of their bets. They sur
rounded the bOokmakers' booths
chased out the cashiers and seized the
money. Attempts to restore order
were in vain. the small force of police
present being inadequate. The crowds
anger increased and men began break
ing chairs and throwing them on the
track Then a rougher element raideC
come automobiles near the stand and
which they sprinkled the booths and
other woodwork and set them afire.
Troops Called Out.
The squad of firemen on duty were
helpless, as the water hose had beer
cut. The authorities telephoned for as.
sistance to Mt. Velerien and a strone
body of troops was at once sent up or
the double quick. The soldiers sue
ceeded i'm eventually clearing the en-
closure by charging, but in the mean.
time the betting structures had burned
to the ground. A large wooden build
ing belonging to the bookmakers also
was set on fire.
The last three races were postponed
Sixty arrests were made. and a large
number of policemen and rioters were
injured.
A large force of troops will remain
on duty throughout the night at the
Longchamps and Auteuil courses.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1906-10-15
And There Are Others.

Besides there's Cowley, Thirwall Will
SON. Cary ,.od Lewis VS. Morris S5Hio, Qgarles
vii, Whittier and Cowper, awl ov them
hav contributed in undyin' metafor to
literachure's illustrious pagez, and they
writ tabor for tabour, teazel for teasel
thru for through, VeXt for VeXed, and
wo for woe.
''Then there's Josh Billins-''
''But waite mint broke in the lUver
oy English az she liz rit and spoke, waite
spelrs want to rite, for instans, about
the human hart and the hart that gam
bols on tn green? How viii U no tn
differns?
''Nevr mind about that" rezumed tn
advokate, not to interrupted. "Az
wuz about to sa-ther's Josh Billns. u
remember wot he wons sed? 1t wuz
this:
'''Ther liz but won thing that kan B
sed in favor of korns and that IL that
they max a man forget awl hiz luther
trublez.' Now Guild anything B more sem
sibl? Surtinly not.
81 want TO sa that line goin into this
thing and if any one rites me letr in
any luther spelin lie refer them TO Mr.
Rusefelt Az secretary ov the Society to
Prevent PromiScuous Placardin in Pub
lie Placer line goin TO draft a set ov res
olushuns Xix tfiz:
Whereaz in WI ov tn fact that imezur-
labor eliminatd hi tn adopshun ov fone-
tic spelin; and
Wheraz sed systm ov spelin IL in ac-
cordans with gud sens and a desirabl
brevity; be 1t
ReSolvd, That thiz society for tn Pre-
venshun of Promiscuous Placardin in
Public Place. adop. wons, and forevr that
mode ov spelin az approved and adopted
hi cur ilustrus PRECEDENT, Theodor Ruse-
felt and fnstigated by tn Lard of Skibo,
Mr.. Karnegy; and b it further
Resolvd, That we, az a body ov pro-
gresive citizens, do mos hartily and thor
cly endors tn action ov tn President
and we predict that wen counties CEN
the dim and darksum past hiZ nam will
among thoz who hav been men oy con-
ylction and who hav therefor iivd in tn
minds of men; and b it finally
Resolvd That if any member ov thiz
society so far forgets himself az to even
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1906-10-15
TALKING ABOUT
THE NEXT POPE
Cardinal RampoIIa Is Now in
Favor With Those Who
Opposed Him.

Rme Oct. 4.-In spite of the fact that
the pope is enjoying perfect health, the
matter of possible result of the next con-
clave, whenever It does occur is being
discussed even among the cardinals them
selves, and this with no desire to antic-
ipate the election or to be disrespectful
ID the Pontiff. The feeling among the
cardinals has changed greatly since Aug
ust 1903 and today there exists a ten
dency quite opposite to that which tri-
Umphed three years ago. In view OF the
vaticans experience with France. the cry
this time will be not for a merely relig-
iCus pope. but political pope; not for q
saint, but for a statesman.
Even the strongest opponents of three
years ago of Cardinal RampolIa now IA
chiefly because he was vetoed by Car
dinal Puzyna in the name of Austria,
speaking for the entire triple alliance.
Opposition Exists.
right of veto arrogated by certain powers
the reason which induced the triple al
lance to oppose Cardinal Rampolla still
exists and the church is today less able
to afford displeasing the central empire
Consequently there are rumors of an ex-
pertinent with a foreign pope, in spite OF
the diSfayOr of the Italians.
For the last four centuries all the
pepes have been Italian.
In this connection the recent election OF
Father Wernz to be bishop of the Je-
suits is considered synptomatic. Every
one prophesied that the general would be
ar, Italian, but finally German was
chosen.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1906-10-15
ADJUSTMENTS

That $4,000 beauty at the Grand NAV
rot be worth the price, but there are al
most ten thousand laughs in the show
Clever dancers, lively music and comedy
of high order are the chief ingredients
in an entertainment that opened at the
popular play house last evening to a
crowded house. The applause and laugh
ter that greeted the fun makers gives evil
Gence of good business during the run
which will include entertainments tonight
tomorrow night and matinee tomorrow
afternoon.
Allen Curtis, who heads the COMPANY
and under whose personal direction the
entertainment is given, is a whole show
in himself Last night he divided the
honors with Marjorie Lake, who is GER
taipIy one of the l!veliest trinkets seen
on the local stage in long time. 1t must
not be understood from this that Cur
It's and Miss Lake are the whole show.
There are a number of clever actors in
addition to these. Harry G. Lewis. Al
Bruce and Fred Cutter back up the lead
ers in fine style. Miss Lois Cecil Hob
son was also much in favor.
There is very little to the play itself.
It is a very slender thread upon which 10
hand the songs, specialties and fun. The
movement is lve'v and there is nothing
Gull or in bad taste.
A crawded house greeted the perform
ance of THE Man Without a Country
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1906-10-15

A crawded house greeted the perform
ance of THE Man Without Country"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1906-10-15
THOUSANDS OF
GUNS STRUGGLED
Russian RevoIutionistS Prepar
ing for Trouble at the
First Opportunity.

Warsaw, Russia, Poland, Oct. IA
consignment of several thousand revolv-
ers. purchased by the Russian govern
ment in Berlin, recently fell into the
hands of the Polish revolutionists. Short
ly after the arrival of the car containing
the pistols at the Warsaw freight yards
an artillery officer and a squad of SOL
diers appeared and presented the bills of
lading and an authorization to receive the
on and carried away. 1t later developed
that the soldiers were disguised revolu-
tionists and the documents forged.
Large Stocks of Rifles.
Investigation shows that since last De-
cember the revolutionists have been ac-
cumulating large stocks of rifles and re-
volverS in Poland, the greater part of
these, according to a member of the par
ty. being purchased in Berlin. where their
the proceeds of recent robberies and
forced contributions, are able to pay cash
for weapons of the latest pattern. The
conSignmentS, it is said, have several
times been shipped by railroad in bond
to Warsaw, the buyers arranging, by
bribing railroad employees. to have the
car side-tracked at some convenient place
on the Russian side of the frontier, where
it is opened and the contents carried
away. They are also struggled in large
numbers over the regular overland routes
for revolutionary literature, most of these
leading from Cracow. in Austrian Po-
land, where the Poles have greater lib
erty than in German Poland.
Smuggling Goes On.
Although the frontier is closely guard
ed, smuggling offers little difficulty oW-
ing to cOnnivance OF the soldiers and
professional smugglers have regular rates
of $3.50 per pound for Illegal pamphlets
and books For arms the rate is some
what higher. AS a rule the smugglers
work in groups Of three or four Arriv-
ing at the frontier one of the party ap-
proaches the guard makes terms with
him, the regular price for a free passage
being about So, paying half in advance
and taking possession of the soldier
rifle until the other members have crossed
the frontier.
In spite of the efforts of the police.
few of the revolutionary arsenals have
yet been discovered
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1906-10-15

was in his usual good form. The bill runs
for the entire week
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1906-10-15

was in his usual good form The bill runs
for the entire week
The new bill which opens tonight at
the Orpheum ought to suit the most fast
idous taste for It includes several head
liners. AT the head of the aggregation
is Chinke, the English boy Juggler. Then
there is the Italian Trio which is some
thing out of the ordinary; Katherine Nu-
sent, the impersonator; Minnie Kaufman,
who lays claim to being the best trick
lady bicyclist of hte world: Linden Beck
with the charming singing portrait; Gard
ner and Madden, presenting a comedy
sketch and the KinOdrome
THE Royal Chef comes to the Salt
Lake Theatre for an enga cement that
runs until Wednesday night Both the
company and the play are well recon-
mended.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1906-10-15
OLD FRIENDS.
MILWAUKEE, Sentinel.

thliWdukee OeHilHei-D
1T notice that quite a number of jokes
are being imported from foreign newspa-
pers"
How do you like them?"
First rate, ] met nearly all of them in
this country years ago."
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1906-10-15
NU F0NETIC SPELIN.
Sum Flu Wurdz That Will Make Ed
jicashin Crate Cinch.
(Bangor Commerciall

'WOt is to boom oV our roots and de-
rlvashuns? snapt tn luver of elongated
and circumlocutiVe orthOgrafy, to tn adj
Vokate of fonetic Spelin, after he red the
presidents sweepin order ov Frida
The adVokate drOpt Mr.. Karnegy'S nu
primer, cast a glance ov witherin skorn
at his ole fashuned inquisiter. and sed:
THE anomiieS and perVerSitieS OV Eng
lsh spelin = obvious enuf, the Ian noes
and they kalin lowdly for regulashun.
j don't no anything about ur roots and
derivashuns, but l do no that som spelins
anomalus and pervers. Wot good is a
root anyhow, except to pig or tree?
For my part I'm six ov silent voWlS
and abSented SylabiS. EdjicaShun for flu
tur gererashunS viii a cinch. Jus think
ov it? Wy, wen my sons and darters go
to skule and colej they kan skip spelin
ov tn futur? Here liz wot it will lux Xix.
and it viii neVr wind up with tn term
egscuSe bad speln:'
Fonetic Luv Lettr.
Dear Hart-Ancther da has dragd its
weery self out and 1 am "a hours nerer
my beloved. Altho vacashun time is only
tn weeks off, it seems fully times as
long, so anxus am to see u. Last term
l studied reedin, ritin and rithmetic and
a fu oV the sciences.
''Forshunately, spelin, thanks to Mr.
Karnegy and Prezident Rusefelt, wuz
omitd frum the kurickulum. and on this
he'd / am not remis. AS to hier mathe-
mates and tn languages, / hav grown
most profishent. For instans, | hav fig
gered out just how long it will TAX me
to walk HON frum any stashun on the
route frum Harvard to Washington
shuld anything hapin TO tn train, and
when 1 arrive / will be abb to tel how
much I luv in French, Gurman, Latin,
Greek and RuShian.
II here tn chapl bel summonin me and
since / hav used all my cuts. must nee
essarrily bring this to a cloZ. Gud-by,
dere Iuv. lie with in tn weeks. LuV-
ingly and egerly urs,
"ALFONZ."
Up. S.-Remember me to awl and tell
ur It'll sister l will bring her awl sorts of
cole suvenirs.'
Gould anything more alurin than
that? Or eazier?
"And Jest LUX, most ov tn nu spelling
Authorized by Mr.. Karnegy and Mr.. Ruse-
felt is centuries ole. Spenser, Milton,
Pope and Fitzgerald used to sa adrest for
addressed; Shaksper and Burns sed blusht
for blushed; De Foe and Tennyson sed
clipt for clipped; the Bible ses clapt for
clapped; Dryden and Gray sed contest for
confessed; Scott and Lowell sed crost for
crossed; Bunyon and Stanvhurst said
deprest for depressed; Goldsmith and
Hacket said dript for dripped; Browning
and Swinburn hav sed exprest for ex-
pressed.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1906-10-15

think luther than fonetically. he viii /
ruld out in darkest diSgrase-
Okolona messenger. (Okolona, Miss.) 1900-current, 1906-05-23

banks, total of 48 At the close OF the year 1905
there we're 263 state banks and % national banks,
increase Of 248. Banking capital increased $11,
O29 665 during the PERIOD being g. 1885, 14S in 1888
and $13 1874 813 at the close OF the year 1905 Indi
vidua deposits increased from $685. 494 to $46,
228, ,6O4 during the PERIOD gain Of $38 1862, TO-
Loans and discounts increased $38 974 400, surplus
increased So, 364, 42O, and undivided profits in
creased 81, ,842,215.
Other states in the South have made creditablo
showiDgs Of this character, but have displayed
a steadier or more continuous advancement than
Mississippi, based on actual business conditions,
and wholly devoid of any suspicion Of mushroom
growth