Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1906-08-31
|, Isieur Middletong! My oystar ready?

- .
sieur Middletong! My oystar ready?'
Yes, SIR"
Vel, IL my oystar ready, you glv'
dem to my fren' Monsieur Snotborg
and ask him to be- so good to carry
dem to my sist' Dis. and my broddel
Ichbod on Sand Creek" So saying, HI
vanished like lightning.
The next morning, at breakfast, oc.
cupied Ned's seat. Mrs. Blank had nc
sooner taken her place than she order
ed a servant to bring her waiter, up
on which she placed cup Of tea and
another Of coffee; then ordering three
plates, she placed them on It; sent one
servant for one kind Of bread, and an
other for another; and so on through
all the varieties that were on the ia
BILE, from which she made selections fol
plate No. /. In the same way she COL
lected meats for plate No. @; No. 3 she
left blank. She had nearly completed
her operations, when her husband came
to know why every servant was en-
gagged and no gentleman helped to any
thing, when the oddly furnished waiter
met his eye and fully explained the
wonder.
"In Gods name, Sarah" said lie,
who are you mixing up those mess es
for?p
For that strange gentleman we
were speaking Of last night" was the
reply.
why doesn't he come to the table p
He was very anxious to come, but
would not let him."
+ "You would not let him? Why not?''
Because did not wish to see man
Of his delicate sensibilities ridiculed
and insulted at my table" .
Delicate devilabiiities! Then why
didn't you send servant to collect his
mixtures?"
Because 1 preferred. doing 1t myself
to troubling the boarders. knew that,
wherever his plates went, the gentle
uiCh bC WV
and couldn't bear to see It,
The landlord looked at her for mo-
rnent with commingled astonishment,
doubt, and alarm; and then, upon the
breath of a deep drawn sigh, proceed
ed:
"Well, d-n" the man! He hasn't
been In the house more than two
hours. except when he was asleep, and
he has insulted one half my boarders,
made fools Of the other half. turned the
head of my barkeeper, crazed all my
servants, and run my wife right stark,
staring, raving mad; a man who is a
perfect clown in his manners, and who,
I have no doubt, will in the end prove
to be horse thief"
Much occurred between the landlord
and his lady in relation to Ned which
we must, Of necessity, omit. Suffice
1t to say that her assiduities to Ned
her unexplained synpathies for him,
her often-repeated desires to become
better acquainted with him, conspiring
with one or two short interviews which
her husband saw between her and Ned
(and which consisted Of nothing more
than expressions of regret on his part
at the trouble he was giving the fam
lily, and assurance on hers that 1t was
no trouble at ai). began to bring upon
the landlord the husbands worst ca
lamity. This she soon observed; and
considering her duty to her husband as
of paramount obligation, she gave him
an explanation that was entirely salts
factory. She told him that Ned was 9
man Of refined feelings and highly cul-
tivated mind, but that, in his infancy
his mother had forced him to eat diff
ferent kinds of diet together. until she
had produced in him a vitiated and un-
conquerable appetite, which he was
now constrained to indulge, as the
drunkard does his, or be miserable. As
the good man was prepared to believe
any story of woman's folly, he was sat-
isfied.
This being the Sabbath, at the usua
hour Ned went to church, and selected
for his morning service one Of those
churches In which the pews are free
and in which the hymn is given out
and sung by the congregation, hall
recitative.
Ned entered the church in as fast
walk as he could possibly assume; pro-
ceeded about half down the aisle, ano
popped himself down in his seat as
quick as IL he had been shot. The more
thoughtless of the congregation begar
to litter, and the graver peeped up sly
ly but solemnly at him.
The pastor rose, and before giving ou
the hymn, observed that singing was
part of the service in which he thought
the whole congregation ought to join
Thus saying, he gave out the first line:
of the hymn. AS soon as the tune
was raised, Ned struck In with ont
Of the loudest, hoarsest, and most dis
cordant voices that ever annoyed sol
emn assembly.
Il would observe" said the preacher
before giving out the next two lines
that there are some persons who have
not the gift of singing; such, OF course
are not expected to sing" Ned tool
the hint and sang no more;; but hi:
entrance into church and his entrance
into the hymn had already dispersed
the solemnity of three fifths OF the
congregation.
AS soon as the pastor commenced hi:
sermon, Ned opened his eyes. threw
back his head; dropped his under-5aW
and surrendered himself to the mos
intense interest. The preacher was al
Indifferent one; and by as much as M
became dull and insipid, by so mucf
did Ned become absorbed in the dis
course. And yet 1t was impossible To-
the incest observer to detect anything
in his looks or manner short OF th'
most solemn devotion. The efrec
which his conduct had upon the con
gregation, and their subsequent re-
marks, must be left to the imagination
of the reader. 1 give but one remark
BLESS that good man who came II
the church so quick" said a venerable
matron as she left the church door
how he was affected by the sarment!
Nod went IN church no more on tina