Evening star., 1906-09-08
What was the useg 1 sa, down
Finally Got the Letters.

After sorting over all of the papers and
| folders and catalogues and such matter.
and distributing them in the two or three
| tiers of boxes at the end of the counter,
| the postmaster picked up the packet of let
ters and postal cards, which was tied
around with cord. He had great search
for his pocket-knife with which TO cut the
cord. He examined all OF the blades with
great care after he'd found the knife.
wiped some imaginary rust OF q couple
of them with his bandanna, and then cut
the cord. Then he turned the bunch of
letters face downward and started In TO
stamp them all with the Squnchvtlle stamp
before sorting them. Slow work, that. He
came upon number of picture postals,
and he commented upon them to the one
galluses.
"Heh. heh! HEIR he cackled, picking
one of the postals up and studying the sea-
shore picture printed on 1t. We all sho'
Is a-gettin' stylish down his-a-way-
heahs keahd fun Jeb Bisbees gal at
Asbury Pahk addressed L her paw. An
heah's one fo' her NAV. An heah,' pick
at It ntenty % e'one one Pos fSm Jos naa 6wsps xns
niece whut keeps house TO him. FUN Bos-
ton. All. sho' CANT unduhstan whut fo'
nybody FUN down this-a-way wants tub
go [ any sch Yank deestric Boston. All
sho' CAN'T and the postmaster gave me
slanting gaze. 1t was plain that he was
trying for rise out of me In order to make
another hit with the wool-hatters on the
barrels with his repartee. but nothing do
ing as to that with me. I was too much
In hurry to get my letter with the check
and duck out of there
After he's got all the letters and sards
GATE te-stamped and turned them over / rec
ornized my letter in the bunch. II was
the only official envelope in the bundle.
and the corner flap was slightly turned up
showing part of the firm name
There's my letter l imprudently said
TO the postmaster. pointing to the official
envelope IF nothing stands in the way
Il
ting me have II, SO 1 can make some kind
trainT
".Ain't nobody keepin' yo' all FUN no
train. sun. promptly replied the postmas-
Ter. to the obvious and immense delight
OF the one-galluses. CANT see that no.
oody's got no hawsuhs chains on yo'
all, suh.' and he began to slowly distribute
the bundle of letters in the pigeon holes.
walking up to the front window every
once in while to get better light on the
uniamiliar @ writing OF some address or, as
may be. to read some postal card My
letter was down near the bottom of the
pile, and began to despair.
Stopped to Wait on the Customer.
THE postmaster was at the front win
dow scratching his whiskered ears over the
address on some letter. when a little bit
OF sun-bonneted girl from a nelghboring
| farm trudged in. She had two dozen eggs
In basket and a list scrawled by her
mother of the things wanted at the store
in exchange for the eggs
How de do, Angelina the postmaster
greeted the child, returning from the win
dow when he heard the patter of her feet.
'How's yo' nav? An has thet boil on yo'
paws neck come tub a haid yit. honey?
Yo' all tell you paw thet l say fo' him tub
put sevuhal faxseed poultices on tibet boil.
goin' to tell yo' paw? Flaxseed poultices?
Thet's it. Yo' all got 1t right. Now, yo'
tell him sho, yo heah me-?
Then he picked up the pencil-scribbled
list Of things the child's mother wanted in
exchange for the eggs.
Him. commented the postmaster. 'Yo'
nav sho wants uh heap o ahticles To-
twenty-fo' eggs. Angelina, she sho' do
Il was afraid he was going to put up the
articles right there and then, before finish
ing sorting over the letters, but he didn't.
He started back for the letters when there
was a hail for him from out in the road.
He walked around the counter and opened
the screen door
"'Nothin' To- yo' all 's'mo'nin. Jim.' he
said to the man in the wagon out in front.
What yo' all expectin', lettuh FUN WILL
yum Jennin's Bryan? Heb! heh, her! How's
yo' con ripenin'. Jim? Right smaht o.
rain, hey? Yo' folks all well? Say Jim.
Amt got airy peach fitten tub eat -.
Then the postmaster returned behind the
counter and got at the mail again. 1t was
five minutes past twelve. and there was 20
CuduCc III Tie WOElu IOT me I'd MAKE my
train. He reached my letter about five min
utes later.
"'Yo' say this ms To- yo allY he inquired
of me. holding my letter out in front OF
of the one-galluses shook again in antici-
patton of more fun. told him my name,
That's tn name heah.' the postmaster
admitted with manifest reluctance. But
how All know this heah lettuh blongs tuh
yo' all? Know anybody aroun heah that
kin identify 20 all?' 60
Had to Be Identified.
"'Oh. I've sold goods to a lot of mer-
chants in this county told him. But
can't-and won't-drive eight or ten miles
to drag one of them down here to identify
me. You can let me have the letter or not,
just as you please. or send 1t to the head
letter Office 1 believe was justified in
feeling some sore around the neckpiece at
that stage OF 1t. My shortness, however.
amused the postmaster nightly / caught
him winking most eloquently at the one
galluses.
"'Yo' all jes' name some merchant what
knows yo'.' he said to me, AN Ah'll phone
thim an git yo' description
Il swallowed a gulp Of wrath and named
a storekeeper In the county seat to whom
I had sold goods. He rang that merchant
up. and presently he was saying in the
phone:
"'H'lo. That yo' all. Cal? Hey, Cal, do
yo' all know a dipper-dapper little Yankee
feller. claims tub be drummer or some-
thin, by tn name o. Blanks. says he's done
sold yo' all goods-snappy kim o. a prop
sishun, wears cute checked clo'es an shoes
'thout no blackening' on 'em an a green
necktie an a straw hat 18th lot o. tow
elm wrapped aroun' 1t In folds. an talks
hissy out O. his teeth an looks lax he's in a
pow'ful hurry an'-what's that? Yo know
him, hey? All right. Cal. Jes' wanted tub
be sho yo' know. How's things? Heah
yo' alls goin' tub run TO Road Supuhvsuh
Hey? Sho' yo' all will git my vote, CAL
yo' an Wfllyum Jennin's Bryan and then
the postmaster hung up the receiver and
shot az look at the one-galluses to see IL
they'd caught it all. Their shoulders were
still shaking
Then he gave me my letter. 1t contain
ed the check. But had to wait six hours
for another train and fight flies all the
afternoon at the bum county seat hotel
while waiting. Me for Headsman Adlai IL
they'd only run him. 1 know where he'd
get one vote" GIG.
Sweated Home-Workers.
From the London Tailor and Cutter. -
1t is very sad to think that sometimes