Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1906-11-08
TRAP AT A GOTHAM
TABLE D'HOTE


hungry and he entered.
The waiter showed him to table.
large menu card, with the words
'eiterated, Table d'Hote, ST. was
handed him.
oysters, PURGE Mongole and broil-
I'd fresh mackerel," he ordered.
AS course after course was served
he forgot that the portions were
neager, for there were IicEtv of 9th.
sr dishes to come. Just as ne was
finishing his entree the waiter unos-
entatiously removed the menu card
irst offered him and in moment re-
urned with another card.
What will you have next, sir?
asked the waiter.
Then, for the first time, the guest
noticed that across the face of the
new menu card had been written in
ed ink:
Dinner s125, unless drinks are
ordered"
Giving the balance of his order, he
was interrupted a moment later by
he waited returning to ask IL he
wished to order anything to drink.
Thank you, some coffee, black, af-
:erward."
The waiter departed.
Dinner over, the guest called for
his check. 1t was presented to him,
The total being $1.25.
"Send me the head waiter" he or
iered.
The head waiter came. The guest
protested against the charge of the
extra quarter.
1T is our rule" said the head wait
sr, struggling his shoulders.
But your sign outside distinctly
says that the table d'hote dinner Is
one dollar" protested the guest.
THAT Is mistake; we have not
changed it yet" said the head waiter.
"But the menu card first offered me
said dinner was only one dollar If
you had stated on the menu card that
dinner was $1.25 would either have
left your, restaurant or ordered la
carte something else. Why was that?"
"The menu card was wrong" re-
turned the head waiter. "As soon as
we noticed the mistake we sent you
the corrected menu card"
Then you admit having made two
mistakes" said the guest. Every well,
refuse to pay more than one dol
lar"
Monsieur will save himself much
annoyance by ordering something to
drink. That will make the amount
all right suggested the head waiter.
you mean that you can bulldoze
me into ordering drinks, Ell? Well,
suppose l tell you / never touch
drinks of any kind?'
"Monsieur's check Is for $685."
said the waiter, lamely.
very well. Suppose go by your
menu card here, which says that din
ner Is one dollar unless drinks are
ordered. On the back of that card I
see that whisky is Is cents. Suppose
ordered whisky straight; will my
check be $1.15?"
Pardon, monsieur, the check will
still be $125. We shall have to
charge you 25 cents for the whisky.
That is our rule-we serve no drinks
unless the amount is 25 cents"
"But your printed card here says
IL cents?"
THAT is mistake, monsieur"
Another mistake, Ell? The third
mistake you admit. Now, look here"
The guest thereupon pulled out a
large roll of bills and fiourished them
under the nose of the head waiter.
Then carefully selecting one dollar
bill he laid 1t on the table.
Now, you and your miserable tribe
Of holdup men can go to blazes," he
said. "You are going to get precisely
one dollar for that dinner
eff you want to go to the trouble
of making a scene have plenty of
cash. You cannot accuse me of dis.
orderly conduct. If one of your wait.
ers dares to lay finger on me I'll
knock him through your plate glass
window.
"You can bulldoze an extra quarter
out of some people upon false pre-.
lenses, but so long as you've got that
brass sign out front announcing din.
ner for dollar I'll see you to king.
dom come before I'll pay you any
more. You restaurant keepers are
robbers, anyhow, and you are making
big enough profit on my dinner even
at the price I am going to pay you.
Take your dollar and vamoose.'
Saying which the guest calmly rose,
picked up his hat and stick and start.
ed for the door, leaving the head
waiter and the table waiter pale with
rage. Suddenly the guest turned.
II nearly forgot you, Francois" he
said to the table waiter. Though |
hear all you walters own real estate,
guess I'll give you the extra quarter
as tip. Catch it,
And tossing quarter to the waiter
who had served him the guest strolled
out into Broadway.
Francois made grab for the coin,
but missed 1t. The head waiter
promptly put his foot upon it.
THAT belongs to the house, Fran.
cois," he said.-N. Y. Sun.
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