Middletown transcript., 1906-04-14
Mr.. PUFFERS AUNT PERLINA
BY ]. L. HARBOUR

in a rocking-che rocking. she
never set in a cheer Of that kind
at all, because she said ladies was
apt to show their ankles when
they rocked; an no lady ever did
that. An as for her having "a
natchrel old woman fondness for
falling to and eating everything
there was on the table, and wish
ing there was more, she just
picked a little at this all IL little
at that an left most of her vic
tuals on her plate.
Puffer knowed her age to "a
day, an she was sixty four years,
three months, one week and three
days old the day she got to our
house. She was the old -maidest-
looking thing you ever laid eyes
on and she was dressed in colors
becomin' only to a young girl
She'd worked about every cclor
in the rainbow into her hat or
dress or cape. The cape was of
red velvet of a shade that would
have given a turkey gobbler apo
plexy Or made Il bull plow up
half an acre of ground with his
horns.
Then she had on a blue and
green and yallow plaid dress
trimmed with purple fringe that
| have an idee she'd ripped off
some old parasol. Her clothes
were all made in the fussiest,
funniest way and she had on one
of these scalloped false fronts
that look as if they was in one
piece cut out of black injun-rub-
ber, with a white line painted
down the center for the parting.
Does any woman in her right
mind think that anyone believes
that a thing of that kind is her
own hair growing on her own
head :? Then her black hair was
all in little stringy grayish curls
a little below her shoulders, and
an old-fashioned round comb with
red glass beads on it was q sort
of a dividing line between the
injun rubber front an her own
hair. She had on a cameor breast
pin as big as saucer and one of
these bead collars that amt been
fash 'nable since before the Civil
War.
Queer lookin'? Don't talk! l
amt one to set duds above good
ness and all that, but when see
her l thought to myself that if l
had to show her around the city
I'd prefer to do it after dark and
steer clear of the strong lectric
lights even then. She had on a
string of gold beads, and her
watch chain was made of about !
fifteen strands O. coral beads, and |
she had on bead bracelets and a
beaded belt. She run turribly to
beads. Now what you reckon
brought Aunt Perliny five hun
lred miles to the city?
I haven't the least idea, Mrs.
Puffer.
Love!
Love, Mrs. Puffer :?
She gave the clothes in the
ooiler final jab, threw back her
lead and laughed shrilly before
saying Yes, iove-or what pass
ID forit. She had come trapesin'
III the way from her home to
meet her 'inamority,' as she
'alled him. La she had il bad.
never saw a lovesicker person
guess love is like the measles
he older one is the harder they
ave it. Seemed SO with our
Aunt Perliny. Yesterday | come
cross the letter she wrote US
elling US she was comm to the
ity, and 1 just slipped it into my
'ocket, thinking I'd show it to
ou to-day. You read it,"
She handed me a letter written
n pale pink note paper with blue
uling. At the top of the sheet
'as stamped a pair of blue hearts !
ierced- with gilt arrow. An
dor of musk greeted my nostrils
S she handed me the sheet Of
aper. Mrs. Puffer gave a little
niff and made a feint Of holding I
er nose while she said:
I'd as soon scent things with I
,imburger cheese as with musk.
10 wonder she never got married I
she d used musk all her life !!
A glance ut the letter revealed
ne fact that it had been written
y a somewhat illiterate person.
1t read as follows
Awy nr-