davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08
flss OF the EYES

The eyes tell many a hb," said a
psychologist, "and that is how ac-
count for the belief IN ghosts. Our eyes,
you see, are always fbbing to us"
Mine don't NIB to me-" said firmly
q man with n square Jaw.
Pardon me-" returned the psychoio-
sist, but | can make your eyes tell
YOU two fbs right now"
Go on" said the other
The psychologist took up q news.
paper and pointed to the letter s and
figure g.
"The top and bottom Of the s and
look about the same size, don't they|'
he asked.
Yes about" the man agreed
Lie No. L." said the psychologist,
"for look here"
He turned the letters upside down.
The bottoms, really, are a great deal
bigger than the tops, eh?"
You're right" the other admitted
reluctantly.
And that's lie No. O." said the psy-
chologist FOR now look here again."
He placed the letters sidewise--
"As matter of fact the tops are a
great deal bigger after ALL"
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08
RAILROAD RATE BILL

Prospects now seem brighter than
ever before for the passage by congress
of a railroad rate bill that the presi-
dent will approve and make into law.
Just how effectual it will be, when
enacted, is a question the courts ulti-
mately must decide. But even though
it prove abortive, at least one good has
railroads over congress is broken. and
another bill. to remedy errors which
this may contain, will be compara-
lively easy of passage
That there is need of a bill to regu-
late railroad rates, every shipper
knows. Equality is unknown in rail-
road circles. Distance bears no rela-
tion to tariff. Everything goes by whim
rather than by rule, and by favor
rather than by justice. AS conse-
quence, chaos ensues.
AS an example, take Los Angeles and
San Francisco The rates from the
east to Los Angeles are higher than
they are to San Francisco though the
latter is actually farther in miles from
the eastern markets--50O miles farther
in the case of all except one railroad.
The result of this overcharge on Los
Angeles freight is that San Francisco
could, before the earthquake, control
the trade Of Nevada and New Mexico,
though Los Angeles is vastly nearer
both. and justly entitled to their busi-
ness. Freight rates actually made it
impossible to compete from here with
city 500 miles north of us.
Under the present laws no remedy
exists for this condition of affairs. Los
Angeles, though robbed every day on
every shipment, has no redress. The
new law promises to aid this city IA
throwing off the shackles of the freight
combine, even if action under it will
be slow and tedious. because of court
review.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

A citizen of Wheeling, W. Va,
writes exultingly to The Herald as fol-
lows: How about the earthquakes? Z?
All the Pacific coast in California is
right on top Of quakes. would sooner
live here in the Ohio valley where we
have plenty to eat and to wear. and
fuel, gas. coal. good warm houses and
money to burn" Now wouldn't that
jar youl We have no objection to the
gentlemans preference as to his place
OF abode. but we insist that his inn
pressions OF California are too uni
versal; they cover too much territory.
There are no quakes in Southern Cali
fornia and we not only have plenty
10 eat and TO wear, fuel, gas, coal,
good warm houses and money to
burn" but we have a few incldentals
in the shape of the best climate on
earth. Anybody who would deliberate-
~ and with malice aforethought prefer
Wheeling, w. Va, to Los Angeles.
Cal, Is almost beyond hope Of reform.
The poor man has our sympathy.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08
A COCK AND BULL STORY

The great productiveness of the ruins
of Babylon in the way of ancient coins
has aroused the suspicious of visitors.
An American who was going around
with guide became distrustful of the
ease with which these relics could be
disinterred. Accordingly he remarked
to his guide while they were searching
about the tower of Nimrod that he
particularly wished to find one coin
with special design. On the one side
was a horses head, with some sticks
placed roughly between the ears, and
on the other side bull and a fowl in
the act of growing. The guide requested
him to draw on paper picture of the
two sides of the coin, which the trav-
eler did. About week afterward the
very coin came to light. There was no
doubt of its genuineness, for on the
diverse was a mares nest and on the
reverse a cock and bull.-New York
Tribune
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08
QUAKE PICTURES AND CARDS
Their Distribution and Sale Should Be
Stopped In the Interest Of
All California

LOS ANGELES, May 7, editor.
Herald)-It Is time somebody with n
strong pair Of lungs and powerful
megaphone perch himself on top the
Union Trust building and give utter
ance to big holler about the way some
of the so-called enterprising firms and
takers are showing their friendship for
Los Angeles and the entire state OF
California.
1t is all right to devise various legiti-
mate schemes to raise funds for the
needy people of San Francisco, but
when Illustrations of the earthquake e
horror and its twin brother, the fire,
are hawked about the streets, and sold
helter skelter to tourists for distribution
broadcast in the east, it seems that the
limit has been reached.
Then think of the thousands of So
called souvenir cards" with scare
pictures of the quake and fire, that
are displayed glaringly along the prin-
cipal streets of the city and sold at a
dime or fifteen cents a dozen, with no
explanatory words about Los Angeles
or other points in the state that were
not affected by the quake, going to the
east to misrepreSent the situation and
SOW the seeds of fear and distrust in
the minds of the people who may have
planned to come to Southern California,
at least.
The entire pciture business, started
for the purpose of putting few dol
lars into the pockets of the picture
fiends and less scrupulous souvenir
dealers, is about the worst and most
far-fetching slam on the entire stale
of California that is now being tolerated
by representative bodies of our city
and state. No illustrated card should
be placed on sale in any town of the
state without full explanatory matter
showing the points that were affec ted
by the quake, otherwise many an
ignorant and thoughtless easterner will
be led to think that the whole state of
California is a good section of the coun-
try to overlook in the future.
Perhaps 1t is a little late to call in
the misleading postal cards and
souvenir books, as many firms and In
dividuals might lose few dollars in
cash. but cash we'll invested for Sou TIL
ern California right now would be tho
raising of a fund to buy up the entire
lot still in existence and consign the
whole lot to the fire.
Forget It," Suppress the souvenir
pictures. JAY-JAY.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

although the Inference Is given that the
architects Of the city" generally in
dorse IT, II is intimated, also. that cap
italists are apprehensive Of further
advances in prices Of building mate
rials
There is no proba bility, however, that
any capitalist will be dissuaded from
building by the strained effort of the
Express to show that the present cost
Of building in Los Angeles is unwar-
rantably high. It is proved by an au-
thoritative statement that the prices
for building materials and labor are
lower in this city than in the average
OF American cities. Figures for lumber,
brick and concrete are lower here than
in any Of the large eastern cities, and
so is unsklled labor. The wages of
mechanics, however. are as high here as
in the east Freightage from the east
makes metal products more costly here
than in eastern cities, but that excess
Is Offset fully by lower cost of the other
building materials named.
The building permits issued in 'the
past two MONTHS" the period in which.
capitalists have postponed action"
according to the crazy story Of the Ex-
press, knock the rockers from under
that new hobby.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08
salIade Of the sittor.swest

NV son. 7 pray you mark her well,
For she Is false Is she is fair
And bitter-sweet. The Circean spell
Is woven in her odorous hair;
Her mad'ning beauty is a snare
BY Satan set for foolish feet
It Is not given tongues to tell
The victims OF the Bitter-sweet
Her Turing laughter sounds the knell
OF those high heart resolves we
swear.
Her flattering honey-lips dispe
Our dreams like Yapors I'm the air.
No hope we have that she Will spare;
Ambition faints before her feet
The Jewels of our souls we sell
TO pleasure her, the Bitter-Swtet.
Her siren-tongue that sounds so we'll
(IIer heart is false. her words are
fair),
MY son, Is like a warning bell
Whose notes forever cry, Beware"
Subtle OF heart, she watches there
Upon corner Of the street
With many a tempting lie to tell
The simple ones, the Bitter-Sweet.
L'ENVOI
MY son / pray you mark her we'll
In no mans house abide her feet
And all her ways go down TO hell
BY primrose paths the Bitter Sweet.
Thomas Lomax Hunter.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08
SHE TOOK The CAKE

The secretary of agriculture, James
Wilson, had been talking about his tea
tablets, boon to Travellers fer one
of these tablets, no bigger than q cough
lozenger, sufices, in combination with
boiling water, to make pint of ex-
cellent tea.
II hope" said Secretary Wilson, that
shall never have to apologize for
these tea tablets as | once heard 81
cook apologize for her sponge cake.
IT was taking tea with some friends
one afternoon in Washington when n
large and beautiful sponge cake was
brought In.
All, sponge cake!" our hostess
cried, and she broke 1t in generous
portions and we all helped ourselves.
But, alasl it was not good sponge
cake. The hostess, angered, sent for
the cook.
L thought, Jane she said, bitterly,
that you prided yourself on your
sponge cake
I do, ma'am,' Jane replied.
And you call this sponge cake 2
the mistress went on. Why, 1t is as
hard and tough as can be-
Yes, ma'am,' said Jane TRANQUILITY.
That is how sponge is before it's wet.
Soak 1t in your tea, ma'am.'"
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08
SCHOOL MEALS IN EUROPE
From the Monlfor.

FROM the MOnIOr.
In London there is the London
Schools Dinner association, a private
charity, which gave in one year 10000
free dinners b the children of the
board schools. This system relies on
the application Of the parent, and the
net result is sad to be that the par
ents whose children most deserve the
dinners do not apply.
In Belgium. Switzerland Except Eur
ich), Venice and some other Italian
cities, the same plan is carried out, ex-
cept that these private charities are
largely subsidized by the state.
In Milan and some French cities, the
meals are given and paid for by 'the
municipality.
The famous Cantines Scholaires Nof
Paris provide meals of excellent qual-
ity to all who desire them, at a charge
of 3 sous per dinner. Admission is biz
ticket, those who satisfy the authoriA
ties that they cannot pay for the tick-I
cts get them free and there is no diff
ference in the appearance of the free
ticket and the pay one. The plan is
said to work WE'LL though here again
there are shrinking souls who can
neither pay the 3 sousnor bring them
selves to ask for aid.
In at least one toKn-the italian
Verceoli-all the school children are
fed, and that at the expense of the
whole commune.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08
THINGS TO THINK ABOUT

There are no seats in Russian
churches.
a monument is being designed in
Richmond, Va, to be dedicated to the
memory of Edgar Allan Poe.
In a case now before an English court
the vital point is whether goose can
drown. One expert, for the negative,
testified that he had goose which al
ways went to roost on pond.
The city council of Buenos Ayres has
adopted regulation banishing timer
ant musicians from the streets of that
place.
In some respects London is very
much behind many English villages.
Practically every rural police station
has it's telephone. but Scotland Yard.
the head and center of London's crimi-
nal detective system. still holds out
against this means of communication.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08
ABOUT PROMINENT PEOPLE

King Edward has nine motor cars.
The king does not need to have his
cars numbered and does not use driv-
ing license.
A 2O-year-old number of Spurgeon's S
magazine, Sword and Trowel, says: "In
Cromwells day the royalists first called
the liberals wings, taking the first let
ter of each word in their motto, We
hope in God, and forming them into
this word"
King Edward VII is the uncle of the
emperor of Germany, will soon be the
uncle of queen of Spain. is already
the uncle of the crown price Of Rou-
mania, the czarina, the crown princess
of Greece, and the crown princess of
Sweden, and is the father of the queen
of Norway.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08
A eREENHoRN A TOURING GUIDE

No instance shows the ready adap-
liability of the average Irishman to
the ways and manners of this country
so well as the case Of the megaphone
conductor of a Seeing New York"
touring car.
This Irishman has been in New York
about five months, yet he daily con-
ducts carloads of New Yorkers about
the city, showing them the sights and
explaining them glibly, too. He gets
off an occasional remark in regard to
his brogue which shows that he rel
ishes the humor of the situation.
me brogue is afther bein' so thick
he says, that the squirruls in Central
park run whin they hear me coming"
New York Press.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08
THE DESTRUCTION OF STANFORD

While the individual sufferers from
earthquake and fire on the Pacific coast
have first claim on our sympathy, the
disaster that has come to Stanford uni
versity will cause many a heartache. 1t
is pathetic that the glorious structures,
dedicated to liberal education and
raised to the memory of the founders
dead son, a benefaction inspired by
love, should be destroyed by a convul-
sion of nature such as they were built
to Withstand. In beauty of design and
charm of surroundings there was no
American university like Stanford
New York Sun.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08
HOLD rHE coMnHRcIAL roRT

HOLD THE COMMERCIAL FORT
It IL conservativeIy estimated that
the work Of removing the ruins IN San
Francisco viii require years time
That statement assists the mind some
what I'm grasping the stupendous task
involved In the city's reconstruction.
The task is Of greater magnitude than
the one faced by Chicago in 1871 It
dwarfs all other tasks Of like kind in
the worlds history.
The railway managers, who are de-
pended upon chiefly to handle the prob
lem, roughly estimate that there are
not less than ten million cubic yards Of
debris to be removed. with the use Of
teams It would take FIVE years, accord
ing to the estimate, to complete the
cleanup. BY using locomotives and
cars. however, on temporary tracks
laid in the streets, It is thought the
" ork can be completed in one year.
From this starting point consider the
probable time It Will take to restore
San Francisco to its former status as
a great commercial and general busi-
ness center. An intimation is given in
the assurance Of the steel trust that it
will give San Francisco priority for
three years in the filling of orders for
structural steel. Probably the end of
the vast work of restoration will not
have been reached at the close Of the
present decade, nearly five years hence.
While San Francisco will be in con-
dition soon to gather UP a fraction of
be hampered and crippled to a damag-
ing extent for two or three years at
least. And in view of the sharp COM
mercial and manufacturing competition
in these days, a crippled business cen
ter must struggle at great disadvan-
tage to maintain it's foothold.
Here Is the golden opportunity for
the northern ports, particularly Seat
tie, to make herculean effort to wrest
from San Francisco it's pre-eminence as
the great commercial mart Of the Pa
ciflc coast. The Puget Sound cities,
backed by powerful and energetic rail-
way influences, have been striving with
their might, in the last few years, to
draw commerce northward from San
Francisco. And they have been sue
cessful in some measure because of the
lack Of energy in such lines for which
San Francisco long has been distin-
guished.
In view of these circumstances, Los
Angeles is suddenly projected to the
front as champion of California, to take
the place Of the stricken champion.
The importance of strenuous exertion
to keep this states commercial hold
upon the business of the Pacific Goa ST
is self-evident. 1t is important to every
county in the state, as we'll as to the
cities of San Francisco and Los Ange-
les. that the vast commercial inter-
ests which have centered in San Fran
cisco shall not, by reason Of accident,
be diverted to northern ports.
San Francisco and Los Angeles
should pull together in this emergency.
The southern metropolis has the fa-
cilities, the ability and the pluck re-
quisite to "hoId the fort'' during the
years that it will take to restore the
northern metropolis to its normal con-
dition.
The Los Angeles home motto fits ex-
actly the situation which now con-
fronts this city and San Francisco, in
view of the tactics outlined by the
northern ports-"Pull together" and
pull hard.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

Some Los Angeles merchants are al
ready weary of the lies of the Hearst
yellow about this city and have done
their share toward eliminating it. The
rest should consider the fact that they
can suppress the yellow faker when
ever they desire It's up to them.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08
My Ticket

1t may,not be good politics.
'Tains far as L kin see
But for "a winnin' ticket
Hobsoa and Hoch, fer me!
Say, wouldn't they be dandies, Z
Amonglth' ladies, now?
o. course th' women can't vote, but
Don't thy tell us men how?
Then, ray for Hoch and Hobson!
Let 'em start out an kiss.
And we kiilwin most anything,
Without 4 chanct to miss!
w. H. G.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

One set Of Presbyterians has elimi-
mated hell from its creed, and now the
general assembly leaves obey out Of
the marriage service. Really the Pres
byterian church is becoming quite the
most agreeable and accommodating in
the list
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

Willie Ridiculous Hearst, the human
hyena, is still spouting about what he
did lin his mind) for Los Angeles. But
he keeps that rot out of his Los Ange-
les sheet; he knows such CUFF here is
too silly for words.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

Any Los Angeles merchant who would
discharge his empIoye detained in San
Francisco by national guard duty just
now would be unworthy the respect and
confidence of the business community.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

After threatening with the big stick
and blufflng in various other ways,
Theodore Roosevelt now fairly tumbles
over himself getting into line on the rate
bill as congress sees fit to pass 1t. The
president is only human, after all, and
we'll knows when he's had enough.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

Mr.. and Mrs. Nick Longworth have
been arrested for speeding their auto.
There's a heap o. difference between
being a presidents daughter and a
congressmans wife.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

There is only one reason why the
railroad rate bill should not pass.
Hearst is sure to claim that "he done
it," and break out in nauseating plati-
tudes about himself and his greatness.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

Somebody send word to Collect Col
linsl They had two earthquakes in
Kentucky, which is only 300 miles from
Chicago, where he ordered the Shriners
TO meet. And Los Angeles is 500 miles
from San Francisco!
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

The Y. M. C. A. canvass for funds for
its new building naturally was side
tracked in the face of the great San
Francisco disaster. But that is three
weeks past now, and certainly Los An
geles should not fail to carry out an
enterprise so worthy and to which it
had pledged itself.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

Senator Clark of Montana is going to
quit, in favor of Heinze. No matter
what ones opinion of Senator Clark
may have been, one has to express his
sympathy for Montana on the change.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

Even with an increase Of 100000 in
the city's income this year. there can
be no reduction of the tax rate. Los
Angeles grows so fast that 1t can
scarcely keep up with itself.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

The oil trust made an awful howl
when the Garfield report came out-but
it all ended in holler. The trust was
"caught with the goods
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

Our friends the Shriners certainly
struck a spell of fine weather, But
nothing's too good for such good fell
lows.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

AS to whether Father Gapon is alive
and well or dead and buried much dis
cussion RACES What's the odds in
either case?
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

The real Panama issue with the
average man right now is; "Shall 1
clean 1t or buy a new one?"
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

.'Obey" has been omitted by the
Presbyterians from the wifes pledges
in their marriage services. Watch the
rush to be wed by Presbyterian par
sons.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

Start right now to secure the shrin-
ers for 1907. Coldfeet Collins will have
been relegated to obscurity ere then.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08
Population Of Los Angeles 22S,29S

Incidentally, how about those owl
cars?
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

The Y. M. c. A. still needs SIPS,
Have you clipped in7
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08
Sealing of Wills

At the present time in India the
papers taken in the civil service exam
nations must be certified by the thumb
print of the competitor, and Wills must
likewise be sealed in the same way.
The success the plan met with in
India, led to a trial and speedy adoption
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08
And Il Did II. Too

Nov that Los Angeles has pulledbff
prite fight for the benefit of the hn
Frantisco sufferers, it might trulybe
said that that city is simply fighting
to do its share of the relief.-BuAlo
Times
Things look squally for John Aex-
ander Elijah Moses Jehoshaphat low
lie, but he may claim, with truth to
have raised this particular squall Jim
self.
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08
AMERICAN POLICE LEARN LESSONS FROM INDIA


In Eastern cities
tho York Evening POS
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08
Pl-LineS and kk-Ups
To the shrA


They have come acrossldesert DER
the hot and burninha;
Heavy were their heardtbin them,
and they sighed. Obrv hand
Looked they past the saad cacti for
roses and palm trees
Where the weary mighld respite,
and the tired rest at
They have reached the slh Breth-
rem, we will let the Azem flow;
The cemels milk is red and the
dates will make you
A feast is spread out for Athe oasis
is your own
II you don't see what younted. It's
your fault-Just makeknownl
Welcome, brother of the rtez: may
your camel hump no nj
For you're at your journeylding, on
the blue Pacihc's shore
Collect Collins tried to stkou, but
no Canuck's edict goes.
Welcome, three times welcorbhrineri
And may you here long bsel
Women are better thank kn-and
how they wish they weren'tg
And they say Alphonso r. loves
Ena! The very ideal
THE Sin of Silence" Is a book.
The only sin of silence is it's Acity.
Kentucky has passed a laJarrlng
Uncle Toms Cabin" Let's go to
Kentucky.
A Chicago janitor is to bde an
English earl. How hath thdighty
fallen!
How Could WEI
The Los Angeles Herald sayt"san
Francisco, now razed, will 81 be
raised again." We had hoped tbara-
graphers would overlook this. .Fash-
ington Post.
Senator Lodges son is an adbrity
on mummies. Studies 'em at hol eh I?
That man in Illinois who denilthat
he would quit plumbing to beAe a
banker went to lot of nhless
trouble.
The coal road inquiry is causil the
railroads lots of worry. Garfiellsn't
making 1t.
Mr.. Lemon: You're asking nj fol
money all the time.
Mrs. Lemon: No; some of thetmt
I'm spending it.
A Missouri man has whiskers Tee
long. He could "show" even Dow
~
AS between rebates and debatek h
railroads are in hard lines.
Many mans course down th
stream Of life is imperiled by his let
ting stuck on a bar.
Al woman in London was so oer
COME by king Lear" that she %sc
But that won't do the author any gbc
And 1t Did It, Too
Nov that Los Angeles has pulledbt
prite fight for the benefit of the IA
Frantisco sufferers, it might trulyb
IL L Il
Los Angeles herald., 1906-05-08

First Passenger-Bes pardon. Dut my
name Is BaEgs.
Second Passenger BaEEs BagBsi
once knew man named Sax. Any rela-
ton OF yoursT