The Washington herald., 1906-10-10

20 tell which Is the more dangerous DNSi-
ness up IN Maine, innocent Outstanding
or deer hunting.
The best way TO secure peace IS to
learn t. shoot straight" says the Presi-
dent Certainly that IS good advice 20
those who aim to secure peace.
That man down South who petluoned
the courts TO change his name from
Smith TO something else evidently never
heard OF Hoke.
Judge McDonough. Of Massachusetts.
has decided tnat squeezing q girls hand
is not Illegal. This puts a girls hand IN
the same class as the small stockholders
once it was the humble grape that
caused appendicitis, then the trolley car,
then the motor car. Next It viii be the
aiTship.
At the same time. we trust that the Gu
ban war may be carried through this time
without the officers round-robiniug the
President.
a Kansas City judge in sentencing a
prisoner recited an original poem 10 him
And yet the Constitution expressly forbids
cruel and inhuman punishment
several Chicago men have mysteriously
disappeared. Chicago can stand that all
right. provided they do not ultimately
show up in St Louis.
After Rockefeller who2' demands d
contemporary. Well, about this time last
year II was the sheriff.
The Esquimos are said 10 be very silent
people rarely ever saying a word. This
! proves that District Attorney Jerome isn't
! descended from an Esquimo.
In view of the fact that President
Roosevelt was nominated by the thir-
! teenth Republican convention. perhaps be
might be induced 10 accept another nOmi-
nation Just to demonstrate the potency OF
| the famous Roosevelt luck over all
! kinds Of hOodoOs.
One man has accused Candidate Hughes
/ Of looking like a Russian general but SC
/ far no one has accused Candidate Hearst
/ OF looking like Field Marshal Oyama
Since the Hon George Fred Williams
| once more hovers on the horizon. who
/ knows but that the Hon Adlai z. Ste
/ vensOn may yet get in the game.
| First it was the Simple Life and now it
I is simple spelling Are we 20 become.
/ after all, nation Of simpletons?
/ Mobile might not be disposed 10 find
/ fault If an occasional hurricane put IN a
/ one night stand there. but a whole week
/ in repertoire IS rather rubbing ii in.
/ Some New York Irishmen have formed q
/ Hearst Club" Wouldn't Hearst
/ Shillalah be more to the point. for ar
! Irish organization at any rate2
Mayor Mcclellan insists that he was put
/ of at Buffalo.
After all. the King OF Spain must rather
/ congratulate himself that the Pearl OF the
/ Antilles no longer has a place in his jewel
/ box.
Abdul Aziz. Sultan of Morocco, stands
/ in mortal dread of assassination. In other
words, Abdul Aziz fears that he may soon
/ be known to fame as Abdul Azizn't
! II is the eighth letter in the alphabet,
and yet it is . for either Mr.. Hearst or
I Mr.. Hughes, without saying which.
Here goes the Constitution chasing the
I flag again.
! Chancellor Day says that the student
who smokes is fool, but it is all right
/ for him to let his lamp smoke.
For sitting on the lid so heavily, st.
/ Louis Democrats last Monday night de-
cided TO sit on Mr. Folk.
President Palma left twenty million dol
| lars in the Cuban treasury Thus in an
! other respect we find that the Cuban
revolution is not Of the South American
variety.
/ Goldfield New. is showing symptoms of
/ city ways, being at this time the proud
! pOssessor of a real strike. GOlddeld. 1t
/ will be remembered. is the city recently
/ put on the map by Messrs. Battling Mel
son and Joe Cans
I Georgia farmers report a strange bug
in the cotton fields. just the farmers old
friend, humbug. we presume.
The hardest problem Mr. Jerome has
/ ever had to solve is whether to bolt the
NlaHaH Hf-an H.