The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1906-07-26
When-the Editor
"Puffed"

Ely DONALD ALLEN
Copyright, 1906, by NJ. NJ. Cunningham

Widow B:dwell ref,.sel the matri.Eo-
nal Offer rendered her by Editor Flint
of tsc Weekly Clarion ana Fergus
Co;Gty Advertiser. Editor Flint had
owned ana e.!itel the Clarion for many
years. lie had never married because
lie hal Eeca to Busy making up AMI
working OF lis edition Of Geo copies.
getting UP aal printing auction bills.
writing thrilling local notices OF wood
wanted Oh Subscription and other mat
tiers co:.acctei With weekly journal
of twenty years ago. Some of his es-
tecaea contemporaries sacerngly re-
marked NOW AMI then taat he stole his
editorials. but when it came down to
w.'.t.sg ont an auction E.ll they yelled
him tie palia.
auction! Auction. Auction!" read
the average bill. Take notice that on
the 14th of September George Styles.
farmer. Will sell at public vcndne all
the live stock and other personal prop
erty OIL his farm on the Red Bridge
road. Said stock consists of horses,
COWS. sheep and hogs and about 100
hens and geese. Sale to begin at 10
a. M. and all will 60 to the highest
bidder"
There was no doubt about the sue.
| cess of the Clarion as Il newspaper or
about the success of Editor Flint as an
editor. When lie finally Eade UP his
mind to marry the Widow Eidwell,
there was no doubt that he would be
success as Il Benedict. He struck Il
snag. however. The widow had been
obliged TO turn to dressmakinc since
her husbands death. and she did not
rank with the Four Hundred of tie
village, but she was lover OF poetry
and she had dreams of poets. While
this kept her grocery bill down, it in
teifered considerably with her getting
ont orders on time, and she calculated
that one about offset the other.
The poetry loving widow had had
fifty different poetic effusions pub
lished in the Clarion over the nom de
plume of FlosS.c, but Mr.. Flint had
received the copy With a gruat, and
the public had recovered from the
Shock each time within twenty-four
hours
The poems had been published to
save carrying Gcad advertising Mrs
Bidwell was rather surprised when
the editor dropped il on he. one even
Ing and proceeded to say that he want
ed her for the mistress of his house.
bet she soon rallied and answered tlat
there WAS an insurmountable barrier
between them. He Gid,'t look like Il
poet. Sic knew what he could do in
the WAY of AN auction bill! but the
man who we'd llossie must look the
part. She would attend to the poetry
as heretofore, but he must at least
| have long hair, an aesthetic face and
dreamy eyes.
| The editor saw at Once that he
couldn't fill the bill. He Wore his hair
short. had Il fat face, and his eyes
We're on the lookout for delinquent
| subscribers instead of looking into the
far away. He therefore picked up his
| lat and walked back to the Office.
/ However. the iron had entered Mr..
| Flint's soul. He hsd laid his forty
| year-old heart at Il womans feet. and
| she had spurned it. He either wanted
to commit suicide or secure revenge
and after figuring up that the Clarion
plant was worth about 81 ,OC0 he Gecid
ed to hang on to earth. The first In
stallment of his revenge was shown in
his next issue. when lie said:
I'VE take pleasure in informing oul
readers that IL brother of the Widow
Bidwell. who writes beautiful verse
under the name of Flossie, has just
died and left her a fortune estimated
at 100000 She has our heartieSt con
CALCULATIONS"
Of course the public read the item
and of course the widow read it. There
wasn't Il word of truth in it. but wheI
people came and showered their con
gratulations she couldn't bring her
self to deny the story. She was evci
thankful to the Clarion for publishing
ing week pursued the matter further.
I'VE understand" it said. "that tn,
fortune left to the Widow Bidweil b,
her deceased brother in the west viii
go $4,000 better than at first reported
There are reports atloat that she will
remove to New York city as soon a.
she comes into possession and buy
residence on Fifth avenue Her poem
this week is the best thing in the pa
per-"
There We're more congratulations
and the widow got deeper into tn,
tolls. 1t WIS so nice to be patted OF
the back and soft soaped TINT sh,
couldn't bring herself to deny the re
ports.
Between the second and third issue
Of the Cllraa the editor had IL caller
His ostensible occupation was selln.
Bohemian oats to farmers at So /,
bushel and sailing mighty close t.
prison as Il swindler, but he had tn,
hair and face and eyes of II poet Evel
the fat and healthy editor had to ad
nit that. The caller wanted to nser
small az. and ask about the Widow
Bilwell. He had seen the notices il
the Clarion about her legacy. and Ii.
wanted II fei: pointers.