Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-07-29

Loathed, She Despsed. Him.
T was during the last days of my convalescence,
one of those calm, peaceful autumn afternoons
that are so beautiful that Miss Grayson my
- trained nurse, told me this story. Permission
had been given me to go out upon the YER
anda that faced the sea, and sat there idly
talking Presently fell to discussing the idea,
occasionally advanced that people stricken with
a hopeless disease rendered helpless by old age
should have their suferings ended with chloroform.
recall that was most severe in my denunciation
of the theory. Indeed, was growing much wrought
up, when | suddenly became that Miss
Grayson taking part in the argument she
who usually gor1ed in an argument l saw that she
was not giving me her attention but was gazing
out over the waters with those wonderful eyes of
hers-so calm, serene, and cheerful.
Thinking that she had not needed me, I said,
somewhat ,irritably: Perhaps you do not agree
with me, Miss Grayson.
NO she replied thoughtfully, Il do not"
But you of all women l began
She paid no attention to my protest. =" You see,
she said Il know case in point.
Sick-room condolences, you know, sacred;
but for the rest shall tell the incidents just they
happened. Although what l about to relate
happened long ago, can remember it as if it was
only Yesterday. Probably retain it all wildly
because of the strangeness of the experience; but
there is another reason: Alice Montgomery the
first, indeed the only, patient whom have attended
that have loved.
| loved her from the first moment l entered her
sick-room. She pale, so frai and sad, she
so weak to night the herce lever that was cruelty
eating away her life, that involuntarily my heart
went straight out to her Afterward, when | knew
her better loved her more, for she always
gentle and patient and brave Though she suffered
greatly all the time, she never made complaint,
nor uttered sign Often as looked down upon her
and knew the pain she n longed to take her
in my arms and hold her close to my breast so
close that the grim Death, which pursuing her
reentlessly, could never find her. But l could only
sit by, helpless while every day he nearer and
nearer.
1t was, I think the love l felt for her that in
tuitivey gave me an insight into her mind. | could
tell her every mood before she gave it voucher
every wish. 1t this intuition that taught
me the secret which she tried hard to guard. She
wanted to die. You people, who know nothing of
the valley of the shadow, do not cannot understand
what this means. But who deal with DEATH who
face to face with it every day, we know. Believe
me, it is the tragic the most bitter the most
pitiful thing in the world
Why she should feel so | could not understand
She had everything to live for-home, friends, a
husband who loved her devotedly-everything And
yet she wanted to die. | used to sit by her bedside
and wonder what the reason could be. At last one
day learned Her husbands voice came from out
side her door, and she heard it. l happened to be
looking at her, and / that she hated-no, she
too fragile for hatred-she 1oathed she despised
him.
He learned this too, for as she grew weaker and
less able to mask her feelings, she showed it every
time he into the | could that she
did her utmost to hide it, but her strength failed
her Whether he understood why she felt so, did
not know then; but he accepted the situation with
sad resignation that was infinitely pathetic. He
never came into the unless she was asleep
and then he would stand looking down upon her
with a world of agony in his face. When she
awake, he would stand outside her door for