Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1906-02-03
LUCK Versus ENERGY
GOriginal.7

! by SaVln tnan hard work, more by
| rascality than by savin' and more bv
luck than either. Did ever tell YOU
about Tommy Shirk, the LATEST man
in the STATE? No? Well, I'll give it
to you.
Tommy married Phoebe Cults and
! $500. Tom had ten acres o. land that
wouldn't even grow blackberries. He
! puttered along tryin' to git somethin'
outen it, or pretendin' to, till half his
| Wife's money had been eaten up, then
! Phoebe said he'd have to find some
way Of maxim a livin'. Tommy was
a good deal cut up by this and went
| off to corner Of his land that was
0vergrown with weeds and lay down
! to think it over. Gittin' his nose right
| down on the ground, he smelled kerr
] osene. AT first he thought some IN
| had spilled 1t Outen a lantern, but on
! diggin' up the dirt with his knife he
! found that oil was oozin' from below
and the furder he went down the more
! Of it there was.
"Well, Tom went home and told his
wife that there was oil on the prop
erty. She laughed at him, bat he took
her to the spot and let her smell it.
Tom TUX his spade with him, an made
a hole an proved to his wifes salts
| faction that the oil came from below.
She had $400 hid away in a stockin',
and in less'n a month that money was
! goin' Outen the stockin' jist about as
fast as well was bein' sunk where
the oil was oozin. Mrs. Shirk was
almost crazy, seen they KEEP borin'
without gettin' oil, but she resolved
to put it all in an take whatever dose
was at the end. One night she handed
over the last dollar, and had not struck
oil. She was too broken up to pay
the money herself, so she gave it to
Tom, tellln' him to notify the boss
digger that the funds were all gone and
not to come back no more. Tom he
started, but bein' dreadful lazy laid
down to smoke his pipe. He went to
sleep and didn't wake up till the men
had gone home. Then he went to the
tavern and spent the money, but he
didn't say nothin' about it to his wife
''The next day, after dinner, Mrs.
Shirk was wipin' the dishes and victim
'em ag'in with her tears when the boss
come to the door and said:
Mrs. Shirk, we've got down to
where there's oil, but it's not a-flowin'
well. 1t has to be pumped up
''The Shirk family was in a more tan
talizin' position than before. There
was oil at the bottom of a well, but no
means O. gettin' it up. If Tom hadn't
been SO cussed lazy be might have
done some pumpin' himself. Weeks
| passed, and the family was nigh on to
starvin'. One night a big storm come
up-a regular cloudburst-and when
mornin' come a creek that had run a
mile from the Shirk farm had been
turned from it's channel and was
a-runnin' not hundred yards from the
house. Mrs. Shirk TUX on, lamentin'
that the water must run right over the
oil we'll and they'd never git nothin'
but water outen it. Tommy who was a
cheerful feller-them worthless cusses
always is-tried to console her, but
there warn't no use, so he said he'd go
and see about it. Perry soon he come
back and said to his wife:
"'Phoebe, the creek is a-runnin' right
by the well, not over it.
We'll, then, she answered, if
you've got spark O. energy left you'll
60 to work, pump out some oil, sell it
and git us somethin' to eat
Il got better scheme n that he
said.
I don't want to hear none o. your
schemes the indignant wife answered.
I want to see some work.
"'Wimmen hain't no brains for
schemes said TOm and he went away.
There was an old water wheel on
the place, to which a former owner of
property had dug a sluice and had run a
saw. Tommy Shirk was too lazy to
do any work himself, but he hired a
man on tick to haul the wheel to his
well. Then he went home and TUX
down the pump and TUX it to the we'll
too. He rugged the pump to the water
wheel, which was turned by the stream
Jist as the oil begun to flow along
comes Mrs. Shirk. Tom was restin' on
his back, with his hat over his eyes,
smokin' his pipe. His wife, not no
ticin' the pumpin and SEEM Tom takin'
it easy, begun to fire words at him.
Tom raised his hand without even
| liftin' his hat often his face and pointed
at the pump throWin' out oil.
THAT was the last time Mrs. Shirk
ever spoke disrespectful to her hus-
band. She admitted that if he was
lazy he had two redeemin' p'ints-luck
and ingenuity. Tom connected his we'll
with pipe line that run near by, and
the oil ran merrily, Shirk charging it
up at the market price per barrel. His
we'll produced about twenty barrels a
day, and even with oil at 80 cents a
barrel he made about SO day. Bime-
by he sunk another we'll and got an
other supply of oil about as large as the
first The same stream and water
wheel and pump did the work, and
Tom had only to make out a bill for
$50 where before he had made out one