davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1906-07-19
Notice.

The G. h. of the First Christian
Church will serve ice cream and cake
on Friday and evening, June - at h.
b. Brsgg's store.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1906-07-19

For long term of years, south half
of Block s, Parkhurst, and three acres
east Of Parkhur-t. W. J. Baker q Co.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1906-07-19
+. SEYMOUR HALL,
Surveyor.

am qualified and prepared TO do all kinds
of first class land surveying. Accuracy guar
snteed. Those who wis., flrst-elass work done
address X. +. D. g., Hood River, Phone SOIL,
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-13
SOME RECENT INVENTIONS

A transparent mica freshield, to be
used in theaters instead of the asbestos
curtain in case Of fire. This would shut
off the draft into the auditorium, per-
nit sufficient light to come, thru to
enable the audience to escape and the
firemen to fight tie fire.
A combined lunchpail and lantern for
night workers. The flame Of the Ian
tern heats the coffee and other food.
Electrical process for producing hy-
drate Of calcium for balloons. A piece
as big as one s fist with water added
will iberate. 1000 liters Of gas to in
fate a balloon Instead of three wagons
to haul material for each military bal
loon, one wagon will now suffice. Fly
drolite, as the substance is CONNER
.clally known, acts as calcium carbide
does in throwing off acetylene gas.
Glass tube apparatus for drawing off
the cream that has risen to the top
in domestic milk bottles.
New roofing material made Of sheet
steel, enamel and asbestos pressed into
solid mass.
An insubmersible suit to save sailors
in case Of sudden accidents The APP
paratus, which can be fixed to the body
in a few seconds,,asis Like a pillow. It
has compartments.for drinking water,
beer, a rope, a knife and an incan-
descent light. Ite-weighs about two
pounds and it's buoyancy is about 300
pounds.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-13
With the Long Bow
One
Of Universe
Eye nature'a walks, shoot TO

matter what did got Even good exempt from
L. slon of Knox whose life flows in endless
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-13
THOUGHT SHE WAS FLIRTING

He. was a dapper little fellow, tho
mayhap bit nearsighted, and perhaps
little vain. He and an equally dap.
pei, friend had stopped on a corner on
the East side to wait for car.
s.Ah,'' he breathed suddenly with a
self-satisfed smile and directed his
friends attention across the street
where in a second story window stood
9, young girl evidently waving some
thing at him. Z, 80
We've made hit, Charlie-one Of
US, he said 1T. is too easy. to lose.
We won t let the poor: thing suffer. / III
wave back at her.
And he did.
:, The girl waved again and then Char
ley took a try. s 81
But suddenly there began a curious
and swift nlonotony in the girl IS move
ments. The young men recognized it
then and .1ttook a tumble ( y.@ a.
The girl was merely wiping the win
dow with a cloth.-Kansas City Star. !
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-13
HENRY'S HEsITANCY

Henry B. Irving, who is now playing
in this country, was not educated for
the, stage, but while studying law often
took part in amateur theatricals. On
one occasion he played Hamlet and his
father saw the performance. Later the
young man asked his parent what he
thought of this, that and the other anna
teur and ST. Henry INVARIABLY =, an
had discussed every one of the per-
The star Of the performance at last
found enough courage to stammer:
g But, .father-what did you think Of
= the rest Of the cast7' Sir Henry
looked blandly at his son and then re
marked dryly: Are you sure that
you want to be an actor, my son90
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-13


half paid for forty odd at cents
by
boy the passageway outside
When home the he found the coal gentleman had
thrown four coal into the vegetable cellar
The next day everything was all right again. @.@~@
George w. Vanderbilt poultry
Of the Bmore estate which perhaps the finest in the United States
chickens from Mr. Vanderbilt from
50 to $25 These chickens always took first prizes at fairs which made the
Notwithstanding all this his chicken could not be made to
living
and steals her nest in the hay that gives mother her pin
Ticksh Reuben rolcking selection friendship
between ST. families and cu
fights resulted Butcher
scheHer complaining
Mrs Kutcher '''N '''0p' D upstairs 0'As '"'' =
declined do And the shortly followed And all
' ..
We told the Duke of Marlborough coming
It's period which happened to
that us PPns had palace on the u o ~ N n
in it's details So while
made they
tonished -. -. ..... 4ax
h rs s ss spaa in P,s Our play and speaking very seriously
In The duke allowed that he ddn well his exact language
duke couldn't do exactly pleased
that 1 we would have to speak S5 the king about it.
something at B1enhem and had
He spoke of the duke pfumed
we laia a;a warning hand his majesty shoulder and said
reory king beer taking
W while his majesty explained to us hoy in his opinion Marlborough was
Of would not disputed king
that opinion of the duke somewhat modified
strong statements =. =. .-%-. "A j. R. ,
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-13
SOME SCOTCH STORIES

1T ne 'er, meet any Of the artist craft
thot I dinna think o. a tale I once
heerd,'' says Clifton Crawford, the
Scotch-English monologist who is at the
Orpheum this week. "It's ABBOTT an
English artist in tn Hielans. He.
was workin' ava on bit Of land
scape when a shepherd carl came along
an, stoppit and watchit him a flu hour
wi 'oot sayin' waird. TIL al artist
he said tae tn carl, as We seem tae
tax connoisseur,s interest in what
m deem, I'd like tae haze yer opeen-
ion o. it, Instead o. giein' direct
answer thing which ye seldom hear
in tn Hielans-th' carl said, Dye
ken Photography \, Moo artists wha :
max peectures VII paint and brushes
haze muckle contempt for cameras. This
artist waur nae exception tae his class,
for he says back tae thu carl, in soorly
tone, I've heerd o. sic q theng as
Photocgraphy-but why dye askq'
sOh, said tn carl, Il thocht / d recon-
mend it tae ye, because it Is cheaper an
cleaner than what we re daen, and what
!, "That's good example o. Scotch.
humor." @s5sn :. -: ~. ~ a.
"If We study both Scotch humor an
American humor yell find it essen
tally til same,'' says Mr.. Crawford.
Each Of them is based on reedicule.
The English joke an thu German joke
an til French joke air dependent upon
blunder o speech or action, while bath
til American an tn Scotch joke carry
a sting, jist as tn carl stung tn ART
ist g pride. Tn more Subtle tn sting
tn funnier tn joke. Did ye ever hear
tn story o. tn Bible seller AM tn ;
Glasgae woman7 Nos
The Glasgae woman wantit tae buy
Bible, but like maist women she waur
baird tae please. After she had exam.
ined a. th' Bibles in the shop-and tn ,
assortment was large and tn range o.
prices wide-she said she cudna find
onything tae suit her, an DOT she walk
it, leavin tn ; bookseller surroundit by
stack so' thu Bibles he had shown her.
Raisin' his arms, claspin his hands am
turnin up his cen, he exclaimit: Laird,
if We want tae dispose O. yer warks tae
tn ;. women folks o. Glasgae ye'd better
come doom yersel1, for,I haze tried an
tried an Gamma daeeit..' So
"But there's nae muckle Difference
betwixt Scotch an Irish wit. The two
countries air iist near enow tagither tae
exchange friendly veesets an swap
jokes, an jist far enow APART. tae be
unable tae thraw stones at each ither
Providence acted wisely when that geo.
graphical Diversion waur made.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-13
.1tf ! like bin thee 1e.st ] win nott say wura

Iff u like him the BEST will mott say
a wurd becaws heez taken u away
5frum me but will bare mi greet aloan
ann If mi hart shood feal JUST like a
StOan
inside mi boozum will tri to bee
uz brave uz possibul ann If u sea
me walken awl aloan ann offle sadd
U mead not think that am prowd ann
madd
but 0nley Wurken hard to drownd mi wo
annFwish him well becaws u luv him so.
ann MUST neavur let him no that
have worshipt ann luvd u on the sill
becaws it wood diloot his joy ann maik
him offle sadd ann sorrie fore mi saik,
fore NEE ann HENRY beamus have bin
chunms
fore menny yeers ann wenn this trial
kums
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-13

it shood not spoyle owr friendship but
shood be
a seacrut In owr bressts eturnalle
ann if mi hart is soar ann broak To-day
lie tri to heel it in sum luther way.
SO wenn u tel him u will bee his bride
hoap the sun will shine SO brite owt-
side
the urth' VII awl seam fare ann he win
bennd - d
to skkis ure lipps wurld without ennd
amenn.
ann twill KUN ann shake his hannd ann
vel
ann sorurs him mi friendship on the spott
ur fishhooks rr moast ennything gott
ann hoap the sun viii aIwus briteiy shine
on both uy U becaws ure trends us mine
W. Foley IN PMAadelphis Hedges. 4
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-13
AN ORATORS STRATEGY

An orator: VINO was equal TO, sCne
emergency was the late George A. Sher-
gagged by the republican national COM
mittee. At big meeting he was ad-
dressing in a town near New York he
was introduced by Mr.. O 'Brien, the
chairman, in most fattering terms In
order to reeiprocate, Mr. Sheridan paid
q glowing tribute to the sterling quail
ties Of the chairman, and wound up
the eulogy by asserting that no man
could say that Mr.. o 'Brien owed him
a cont. & Go 49,. :s...<
.s<'t He owes me $3,'' came a keen Gel
tic voice from the rear of the audience.
It was almost a solar plexus blow
for the orator, and the audience started
to laugh and jeer. Rallying, the
friends; / will answer that man pres
entity" His assertion was to gain
time, and if possible, have the audience
forget the incident; but again that
penetrating voice cried out:
He owes me So cold cashl'
Advancingto the edge of the plat
form, General Sheridan, in coniden-
tial tone, said: Yes, i know all
about the$$S, for my friend, MI.
O 'Brien, has given me the inside facts.
Ladies and gentlemen, the truth I is
SIMPLY This, ana 1t reveals a peculiar:
character. This man who has inter
rupted me met Mr.. O 'Brien recently
and asked him for the loan Of $40. 4
haven It got $40, said the generous Mr..
O'Brien, but here are 81, handing the
money to him. Now this man is go
ing around saving my friend, the hon
orable chairman, owes him So, because
he could lend him only. 81 when $40
was requested. A roar Of laughter
filed the hall, and the indignant man
tried to answer the orator. He was
howled down. The chairman whispered
in General Sheridan g ear, "You have
saved me-you are genius. Leslie Is
Weekly. ... y
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-13
THE PosToFF1cE LOOKED BIG

. = = = = l.
Z. She was a dear old lady, who had evil
IDENTIFY. never been in a large town be-
fore. Her. grandson, he was presumably
was showing her the sights: With his
steps as well as st Is WhisI her hGAe oyut Of Of
danger every few minutes, they .'were
doingo Grand. avenue. You may i'm
agine what revelation the new sky.
scrapers were to her. And soon they
came to the federal building.
"And that is the postoffice, said
the young man.
"Dear me- she said, call Of that9''
,"All of the first floor and part of
the basement" he replied.
Her mind went back to the little row
of lattice work and glass in the rear
send Of the grocery store at home.
they have to have boxes in there there
for a good many people. kansas City
Star. DIX II
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-13
THE DETACHABLE SORT

Grace-Marie has such beautiful
hair! Why, she can sit on it'll -.
Helen-How careless Of her to leave
it lying around on the. chairs!--Lippin-
colts. - 49,. 4 .4rss s.# 5r-
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-13
THE MINNEAPOLIS JOURNAI,. rsv.s
BLOWS EXCHANGED AT THE II BAR

.8,,{ s.S Scrap BOOB s ss
Over-shrewd laWy ers Fen furnish
their adversaries with wsaaSpa Chs III 5.s
Did you see this tree fkAt has been
mentioned by the roadside i,.islan adyo.i
:. Yes, sir; /, saw it very plainly. y
1t was. conspicuous, thenq =, Is s.. rs
The witness seemed puzzled by the
s neW word. He repeated Ais former as.
"What is the difference, sneered
spicuousYo sse ,
But he was hoist with his own Pc
tard. The witness innoeentk an
can see you plainly, sir, among
the other lawyers, tho,y are not bit
In another instance blow directed
against the character Of witness forci-
80 :. :. Y g, were in the company Of these
PeopleY'' he was asked. s;.s /, S. 4.
of two friends, sir, - 81 - D, =
Friends! Two thieves,..I suppose
you mean = ,sD,5.
"1That may be 50, was the dry
retort; they are both lawyers &. !.
The blow that destroys the effect of
an adverse examination is u occasion
ally more the result Of an accident
than of conscious effort. In trial not
long ago a very simple witness was in
the box, and, after going thru his
ordeal, was ready toEretire. One ques-:
ton remained: 5f Ia ~ i q .,
Now, Mr.. ---, has notsssan attempt
been made to induce, youssto tell the
court different storys ss4fss,s S.s .,-
a diff; different story to what I have
eyes; is it not sofv sss Sc 81 I:2 .s W. i:
"Yes, SIR Sax sf.s.'ssssz 3. 3 5, S. e5
Upon your oath, I demand Ito know
who the persons are who. have at:
tempted this u q. - .e
"Well, sir. you We tried as hard as
any OF EN-, was the unexpected an
swer.
It ended the conversation.
Jim Jackson was brought before
| western judge, charged with chicken
| stealing. After the evidence was all
In the justice with a perplexed look
"Buts I do not understand, Jackson.
how it was possible for you to steal
those chickens when they were roost-
Ing right under the owner s window
and there were two vicious dogs in the
yard. -
"Hit wouldn't do yer bit o. good,
ledge, for me to 'splain how I kotched
dem chickens, fer yo!' couldn't do hit
yerself eff yer tried it fohty times, an
yer might get yer hide full er lead De
bes' way fer yer to do. iedge, is Jest
ter buy yo' chickens in de market.
same ez odder folks does, and when yer
wants to commit any. rascality do hit
on de bench, .whar yo' is at home"
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-13

In Germany oak trees only live to
be about 800 years old, while in Nor
way and Sweden the pines will sur
vive for $40 years.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-13

one or those bad days. he had bare
ly started; to leap into pair Of Short
stout pantaloons and was dancing on
one limb while dangling the other,
when he stepped into the hole left open
E by the absence of the hot air register,
which the hired girl had taken out to
dust and neglected to return. No man
without one limb in his pantaloons and
the other in the heating plant can i'm
agine exactly the shock such an en-
forced position brings to the mind.
Can you wonder when he blames his
wife and makes other uncomplimentary
remarks even upon the way the uni
verse is being conductedf
After replacing some Of his skin and
holding it in place with black court
plaster, he moodily descended to break
fast, where he managed to tip over a
cup of coffee. This time he did not say
a word-not word.
After breakfast, approaching too
near, it's cage, he was seriously pecked
by an enraged canary.
Hardly had he reached the sidewalk
after slamming the front door, when he
was run down by baby carriage.
" Stepping into the street to dodge this
obstruction. he was butted back to the
sidewalk by big red honkwagon.
Then he was almost knocked down
by an autumn leaf falling on him. This
was simply "'scare.'' II
T At the store the first document that.
showed up in the mail was the coal bill.
had Hannah More's complete works in
for in forty odd years at 10 cents per.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-13

A Japanese woman's age can be told
from her. dress, tits, probably the only
country in the world where women are
not ashamed Of their age. ~
Mexico weekly ledger., 1906-10-25
Noble Rad Man

In a recent issue of Chicago Droyer
journal, we find that the Noble Rel
man, instead of being extermInated
is on the increase; was 76 years az,
that the first actual Genus was taken
when there were 253464 Of him; parioi
TO that time every thing had beer
guesSwork regarding the number
Then in 1860, there were 254200 en-.
umerated. Then in 1880, twenty
years thereafter, there we're 25G. 127,
Now, by the retnrns OF the Indian
agents, there appear to be 2sa,O 900 on
the reservations OF the country. The
ioea is advanced, that the Indians in
their native state, on account OF
their migratory habits, and constant
warfare among themselves, did not
increase rapidly as they would had
they been settled and leading peace
ful lives, as they now do. The average
person would suppose, without read.
ing up that it would be only a short
time till 10" would be a thing Of the
past, but figures will not bear out the
idea. Many Of the Indians in Okla
are intelligent, and are financial
" prosperous. Many OF them are
educating their daughters in the
schools OF the States.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1906-10-25
HOSPITAL FOR MEXICO,
The Windsor Hotel Building Would
Make a Splendid Hospital For
Mexico.

All Of the citizens Of Mexico with
whom the writer has talked favor a
hospital for this city. The physicians
Of the city and county seem enthusi.
astic in reference to this enterprise.
The Windsor Hotel building, we
believe, could be purchased at a most
reasonable price, and would make a
splendid building for this purpose.
A first-class hospital well managed
would prove not only a financial sue
cess, but would be a great convenience
to our people. The Mexico and Au-
drain county physicians should take
an interest in this matter and confer
with the Business Mems Association
in reference to financing the PROPOSE
ton.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1906-10-25
Our Hat is OFF,,

l~nuefenuance NO. Examiner.
We take of our hat and bow 10 best
style to r. NJ. White OF Mexico. Mo.
Mr.. White took charge Of the Mexico
LEDGER thirty years ago when he was
newly graduated from Westminster
College and without newspape ex.
p%erieuce. For thirty years be has
managed his newspaper property and
has made 1t a success at the same time
becoming one OF the best known and
influential country newspaper editors
In the State OF Missouri. He Is pro-
minent In the Missouri Press Associa-
ton serving year after year as cores.
ponding secretary. He has served as
recording secretary OF the National
association and is a life member and
one Of the best known men from any
state who attend this meeting. While
Mr.. White gets all the credit for his
success, we are inclined to the belief
that much credit is due to Mrs White
who is almost as well known as her
husband. We bow to both Of them
and express the wish that they may
yet delight the hearts OF many friends
through many useful years yet to
come
Mexico weekly ledger., 1906-10-25
YOUNG SOCIETY GIRL 10 N
Miss Bessie Lee jackson, Of :
City, and Mr.. Reuben W, Ts,ls ,
Of Roanoke, Mo, to bs ss,'
ried November Twsntsth'

Miss Carrie Jessie entertained n,
day afternoon at her home in .a'
Mexico in honor of her consID \
Bessie jackson. Before the atta,.'
ended the assembled guests wsrs ,
of the approaching wedding NJ ,
jackson to Mr.. Reuben W. Tayla,
Roanoke, Mo-, to be held IN
Christian church, of this city, Nov
Der twentieth. Rev. A.W Kokenda
will officiate.
Miss Jackson is the daughter Of
d. Jackson, one of Mexlco's most !
minent citizens, and q young wor
OF many charms and graces.
Taylor, a graduate Of Mo. NJ. A..
young business man Of integrity.
LEDGER extends congratulations
advance.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1906-10-25
BUNK WITH RATTLEsNAKEs
Reptiles Seeking Warmth Become a
Seourge in Washington.

SPoKANA, WASHINGTON, Oct. g.
Reports Of an unprecedented scourgt
Of rattlesnakes are arriving daily from
ranchers along the Columbia and
Snake rivers. With the advent OF
cool nights the rattlers seek cover and
warmth and succeed in locating the
hunks and beds, with the result that
scarcely a day passes that some man.
or woman does not awake to find a rep
tile for a bedfellow.
At Riparia, Washington, where a
railroad camp has been located, Mrs.
James Harris, wife Of the foreman OF
the construction gang, was so badly
frightened by such a discovery that
she became a mental wreck aud Is not
expected to recover for weeks, II at all.
So numerous did the reptiles become
In that locality that the camp is be-
ing moved TO q place ten miles down
the river.
At Waterville, Washington, Miss
Kate Wolford, who is holding down a
homestead, packed her valise and
visited the ranch Of lherl brother, ff-
teen miles distant. Upon arrival
there she opened the valIse TO exhibit
some fancy work when a rattlesnake
tumbled out onto the floor. The
brother dispatched 1t with a stove
poker.
A remarkable feature OF these &C.
counts is that instances are rare in
which one has bitten by a RATHER
The cold weather, which accounts
for their presence about the haunts Of
civilization, also has the effect of max.
ing them sluggish in their move.
ments and, consequently, less dan
geroug,
Mexico weekly ledger., 1906-10-25
RUNNING SORES
COVERED LIMBS
Little Girls Obstinate Case Of
Eczema = instantaneous Relief
By Cuticura- Little Boys Hands
and Arms Also Were a Mass
of Torturing Sores = Grateful
Mother Says;
"CUTlCURA REMEDIES
A HOUSEHOLD STANDBY"

"In reply to your letter I write YOU
my experience, and you are privileged
to use it as you see ft. Last wear.
after having my little girl treated by a
very prominent physician for an obsti-
nat case OF eczema, | resorted TO the
Cutlcura Remedies, and was so well
pleased with the almost instantaneous
relief afforded that we discarded tho
PHYSICIANS prescription and relied en-
uneiy on the Cuticura Soap, Cuticura
ointment, and Cuticura Pills. When
we commenced with the Cuticura Rem
edles her feet and limbs were covered
with running sores. In about six weeks
we had her completely well, and there
mas been no recurrence OF the trouble.
In July Of this year a little bow IN
GU family poisoned his hands and arms
with poison oak, and in twenty-four
hours his hands and arms were a mass
OIL tortur1ng sores. We used only the
Cuticura Remedies, washing his hands
and arms with the Cuticura SOAP. and
anointed them with the Cuticura Oint-
ment, and then gave him the Cutieura
h~esoivent. In about three weeks his
hands and arms healed up; so we have
lots Of cause for feeling grateful for the
Cuticura Remedies. We find that the
Cuticura Remedies are a valuable
household standby, living as We do
twelve miles from a doctor. and where
= costs from twenty to twenty-five DOL
lars TO come up on the mountain.
respectfully, Mrs. Lizzie Vincent
Thomas, Paramount, Walden's Ridse.
Tenn, Oct. 10, 1905"
.comFlsss Esismsl snd Iuirrrsi T,..,ms,, a,
hss,ei tesn Fimrls . scrutula, from iniansy . kry
= tsiteia $50 =, oinAneus. So Hesdfg.
us fnfm = Charuais Coated Flia - ~ -
: - q ~ drsrrias a dnFis - M ne.
-. s.se.s h.n ~ es fsd. rais lung
aae -hgs % Cur ruHa4las. Disdraflrr
haa-efa aa@ lhe Cfeat nkia nosh.
Mexico weekly ledger., 1906-10-25
VISITING FORMER HOME.
John L. 0verton. Of Glendale Cali
fornia, Meeting Old Friends in
Boone and Other Counties.


John L. Oyerton, OF Glendale. Call.
%fornia, arrived Wednesday from Mex.
leo 10 visit hit cousin, d. A. Robnett,
whom he had not seen for more than
twenty years. Mr.. Oyerton was born
In Galloway county and lived there ION
the Grand Prairie near Prairie Chapel
for fifty years, Twenty-one years ago
he went TO California and has been
there ever since. He Is now engaged
10 the real estate and insurance bust.
ness at Glendale.
Mr. Oyerton left California q month
ago and has been visiting friends and
relatives In Kansas City, in Galway
county and Audaln. Mr.. Oyerton
has many relatives In Mexico, and IL
was there he married Mrs. Overton.
then Miss Mary Williams, a Hardin
College girl. Mr.. oyert0n was former.
ly well known In Columbia and Boone
county.