davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-05-08
JAYHAWKER JOTS

Salina is thinking Of making its May
festival an annual affair. Well, 1t may
Charlie Blakesley gravely points
out that while the effort to break the
slate last week was not successful, II
has a Denton.
A Central Branch railroad man by
the name Of Solomon has committed
suicide because he was in love. Here
is a question for debate: Resolved,
that he lived up to his name.
Are the joints running in James,
town. The Optimist says "rattlesnakes
are becoming too numerous for peo-
pie to fish on the marsh. without
wearing rubber boots
Opinion handed down by Mr.. Justice
Davies in the Concordia Kansan:
Maybe you do not know the Repub-
lican candidate for attorney general2
That doesn't make much difference
he ought to do as well as Coleman
anyway.
Fred Trigg of the Salina Journal
tried to enter the Republican state
convention last week and a doorkeeper
stopped him. you can't get in with
out ticket said the guard. II have
no ticket" replied Trigg, but here's
my railroad pass" He went in with
out further hindrance.
Philosophy by Mack Gretchen: This
is the time to spray your orchard if
you want to avoid that meaty taste in
the apples this fall. IN KAN
sas when mention is made of 1.-The
law it always has reference to the
whisky business. May is the
month of tornadoes. a time when most
Of the prayers in Kansas are said in
the cellar In editing
newspaper the scissors may not be
mightier than the pencil but they are
often a good deal handler. . ~
Ever meet the fellow who says things
to you in a joking way and then goes
out and tells people how rough he
handled you?
Story by Bent Murdoch: "F'riday
Gibson, ice cream soda and Kaw river
water go long way towards "irrigat-
ing the lower levels and making glad
the hearts Of Topeka people. Glib
son, be 1t known, is manufactured by
Friday & Company. Pittsburg. Two
very learned lawyers were having
heated discussion at a dinner table, in
a Colonial building, on Harrison street,
| Topeka, Thursday. when one of the
distinguished gentlemen got warm,
very warm, in fact, when the other
lawyer. who is railway attorney,
turned on his opponent, who is a law
yer. shortgrass statesman and newspa-
per editor. and said: IF you don't be
careful I will go down to Pittsburg
Pennsylvania, and bring suit against
Friday Gibson for libel"
Jewell Republican: Mr.. and Mrs.
Frank Poynter Of Osborne county,
heard a chicken squalling in their
hen house one night last week. after
they had retired. Mr.. Poynter jumped
up and got his gun. His wife followed
him onto the porch where he fired
both barrels In the air with a view of
soaring away the thief. Instantly
there was a flash and then another one
from the hen house window and Mr..
and Mrs. Poynter were both struck by
scattering shot. They retreated and
the person who did the shooting got
away It is hardly thought that the
object of the intrusion was to steal
chickens. as they made unnecessary
noise. Mr.. POINTER will probably re-
serve one load next time until he sees
whether his bluff works.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-05-08
TIE RIGHT IDEA

The anti-pass movement should
make a clean sweep, including even the
newspapers Let the railroads paw for
their advertising and the newspapers
for their mileage. At cents a mile
everybody can afford to pay his fare
Jewell Republican.
The movement to place all newspa-
per transportation and railroad adver-
Using on a cash basis is spreading.
Newspaper publishers whose space is
worth having are coming to the idea
that what is worth having is worth
paying for, and wise railroad adver-
Using men believe the same way con-
corning transportation. The only kind
Of a newspaper man who accepts a
blanket pass in these days in return for
which he gives are railroad company
all the advertising it wants is he one
who is either siipshod and careless in
his business methods, or who "gads'
more than is good for his paper in
order to get the worth of his adver-
Using.
The pass system Is a poor one for
both newspapers and railroads It not
only tempts the editor to travel a great
deal to the neglect of his business. but
it also makes it easy for the railroad
company to carry a lot Of advertising
that does it no good and which is only
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-05-08

sadly. 'Like2 He is the finest mar
In the whole world. "
He walked swiftly to her. but,
Helen. Heleni'' he exclaimed. 7 don't
understand It at all; I thought you
were happy here, and 7 supposed OF
course you understood things. I'm
lonely, too; I haven't had q home for
six years, and I thought that some day
Helen, don't you mind leaving me2
Won't you miss me at all? Haven't
you seen, girl. what you are to me?''
He took her hands and drew her up
beside him. Didn't you know, Helen?''
Know what?' She lifted her brown
eyes to his.
That love you and want you to be
mine.''
You never said So" she answered.
That's because I thought you knew
and because I always bIunder. I need
somebody with me all the time. I need
you, helen; you're the biggest part Of
my life. Come and make a home for
me-"
He folded her suddenly in his arms
on him.
sweetheart he whispered. Il love
you. I love you"
She lifted her face to his. Dear
she breathed % softly that he had 10
bend to catch it, Il have loved you for
four years
He held her close in the gathering
dusk for one ecstatic moment Then
she drew away. He came back to earth
slowly Not letting her go. he looked
away and out OF the window where the
golden light had been merged into Il
dull purple streaked with red, and
where the evening star cleaned radi-
ant in the upper blue. This other
chap" he began.
what other chap?" she asked.
The one you were-were going 20
marry
She raised on her tiptoes and kissed
him. There's only one" she whis-
pered "and it's your
Then she fed into the other office
Everybody says that Lees wife is the
better lawyer Of the copyright,
1906, by P. c. Eastmentl
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-05-08
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.

Iron the Chicago News.
A man who kills time Stays his own
character.
Some people appear to be proud Of
their ignorance.
It's up to the tramp steamer to
dodge police boats.
Praise men and f1atter women and
you will have many friends.
A knowing man can size up the love
of a woman by her signs.
In telling a man of his failings use
long distance telephone.
Cupid behind the arrow is more dan
gerous than the man behind the gun.
The man who has a system for beat
ing the races seldom has anything
else.
Sometimes a man longs for tomor-
row because he is ashamed of what
he didn't do today.
Most of the things that come to
those who wait are a trife stale by
the time they arrive.
The average woman could no doubt
keep the wolf from the door with her
voice-if the wolf wasn't deaf.
A genius who succeeds in fnventing
a cornet that viii blow the head on
the blower will not have lived in vain
The man who never made a success
of anything in his life always wonders
why other men do not heed his ad-
vice.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-05-08
JOURNAL ENTRIES

The Kansas City Star wants to call
Kansas City. Kas., the West End.
but the Jayhawkers on this side of
the state line are objecting. This de-
partment realizes that it isn't sitting
in the game, but what's the matter
with calling it the Wet End-partic-
ularly on Sundays?
A st. Paul paper prints a piece
about the urgent Need of Small
Money" We can recognize the urgent
need without our glasses, but we don t
know as there is any special demand
that 1t be excessively small. Twenties
will do much better than ones, thank
you
As we understand. it. the meeting Of
the Democratic state committee which
is called for next Saturday is for the
purpose of ratifying the Republican
ticket
Nothing" says an exchange,
causes a boy to scrub his ears except
a sweetheart or a circus" This de-
partment is somewhat skeptical about
the circus. No real boy sees any rea-
son for washing his ears to go to a
show.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-05-08

In the bitter cold of last winter-1904-
1905-the AIikado not content with the
fullest official reports, sent his grand
master to look into the conditions at the
front, to ascertain by visiting every
camp and outpost, how the soldiers
were faring. When Count Hi1ikata re-
turned with his narrowing tale Of
frightful suffering caused by the cold.
the emperor was brokenhearted. Moth
ing more could be done-the Man
churian winter must drag It's icy sea-
son throughput the emperor would
not take his ease while his men were
freezing, and the order to discontinue
all heating of the palace till the war
should be over showed that his sympa-
thy was with them day by day.-The
Worlds Work.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-05-08
GLOBE SIGHTS.
IFrom the Atchison Globe. ]

IFrom the Atchison Globe.1
Our lightest pain; the window pane.
People should quit ice cream sodas
at thirty-fve.
Men who have violated the law say
It IS not hard to do.
The woman who can argue should
be man-lilze enough not to cry.
Elections and marriages are Just
alike: there is nothing the candidate
will not promise beforehand.
How hard to believe the nice things
you hear Of others! How easy to be-
lieve the nice things others say Of you!
At every public meeting. and in
pect much that we have no reason to
expect.
If people would be true to them
selves, and to each other. instead of
to approximation, what a blessing it
would bel
A man is brought up to believe that
women are better than they are. and
woman is educated to believe that
men are worse.
What reputation for wit a fool
might acquire If he found an undis-
covered country where he could palm
off all the old jokes,
A mans tendency is to keep himself
clean first, his house second: a wo-
mans tendency is to keep the house
clean first and herself second.
If you think you are well known,
and learned, go three miles from
home. and you will find people who
never heard of you who know things
that you never heard Of.
Some of the crazy men refnse to 90
peacefully to asylums but insist that
they are the wisest men in the world.
and that they are divinely appointed to
save people who are perfectly sane.
We are creatures OF the lower life
~r47a re,r. L
truth. A man who is a good neighbor
and friend, and pays his debts from
the proceeds OF honest labor is worth
a thousand theosoDhists who are al
ways expecting occult things to hap
pen, and invent them when they DO
not
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-05-08
HUMOR OF THE Day

You say Johnson is in the insane asy-
lqm and still Is making a mine OF money.
"oh. he is writing popular songs. Ia
coma News.
A Los Angeles girl is going to marry the
teacher from whom she took lessons on
the cOrnet- In Other words, the tooter is
going to wed the tutor.-Los Angeles Ex-
press.
This foreign representative has a
grievance" said the grand vizer
Well" answered the sultan of Turkey,
YEARLY, hand him the apology catalog
and tell him to take his pick. Washing
I'd like to remark said Uncle Hiram.
that this world would be a whole lot
happier IL people would buy grapes and
jelly for the sick with the money they
usually spend on flowers afterward. De
troit Free Press
Il notice Nuritch Is just beginning to
blow about a family tree"
But does it amount to anything?s
on, yes, it's all right as trees go.
believe it's shady. Philadelphia Press.
How Is your son getting on in his new
He knows more about the business now
than his employer does. All he has to do
now IS to convince his employer. PHIL
adelphia inquirer
''Bridgeti' (1o answer9
'Bridgetr' (Again no answerl
'Bridgettfi''
DIM comm. num-.
We'll why didn't you come when first
..shure, an OF only hurd ye call tn
thurd tonne. "-JudGe-
Guest-Here, I ordered a porterhouse
steak and a fried egg You've onlv
brought me the egg Where's the steak?
Waiter-Under the egg, sir.-Cleveland
Leader.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-05-08
HOW GERMANY DOES IT.

The German governments proposed
way OF furnishing automobiles who
run down the people of the country
side is worth considering. Embodied
in a bill is the scheme obliging auto
mobilists to pay life annuities to those
dependent on persons killed by their
motor cars or to those permanently
injured by them. The owners of the
cars and not the chauffeurs would be
held responsible and the annuities
would be assessed by the courts
Springfield (Mass.) Republican.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-05-08
oUAKER RrFT.EcTToNs.
IRON the Phiiadelphia Record.

GFrom the Philadelphia Record.J
Egotism is merely the happy fac
ulty of pleasing ourselves.
The size of a dollar depends on
how many Of them you have.
When girl is over 80 you can't
fool her by sending her candy and
flowers.
The fellow who lives without work.
ing may eventually find 1t hard work.
Marrying a man to reform him is a.
good bit like trying to make an ONE
lette out of a bad egg.
Wigg-Henpeckk shutters. doesn't
hep Wagon. no; that's only
habit he has of trying to get in a word
edgevise.
Nell-she was a long time fishing
for a husband. BeIle-But she finally
landed one. Nell-Yes; and now she
doesn't know how to get him of the
hook.
gwag-This whisky of mine is
Is years old It is an incontrovertible
fact that liquor improves with age.
Guzzler (who hasn't had a drink for
half an hour)-WeIls let's see how
much It has improved since that last
drink.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-05-08
erANpARD oTTls ..DEFr.. :.

It viii not be at all surprising If the
Standard OIL octopus is convicted Of It's
crimes-some of them-as a result of
the Garfield investigation. 1t may por-
sibIy squirm out as the beef trust did,
but president RooseveIts remarks about
the Humphrey decision is liable to have
some weight. even if the Standard at
tempts the immunity dodge as the beef
trust did
The Standards reply to Mr.. Garheld's
charges is only a def" It simply en-
tiers a denial, and denial viii not go
far in convincing the people Of the
United States Of its innocence.
President Roosevelt evidently means
business in this matter. The Washing
ton Star expresses the right idea. when
it says the president has done nothing
better in office than this indictment OF
Standard OIL
''Ddr. Rogers and Mr.. Archbold deny
the allegations, says eStar, and both
defy and ridicule the allegators- They
are sorry for Mr.. Garfield, who, they
contend, did not see his way through
the subject, and they jab the president
with an imputation of business. It
is the Standard OTIS fashion of plead
ing not guilty.
Any other reply would have been a
surprise. The country expected the one
that has promptly been made. This time
it is the expected that has happened.
Mr.. Rockefeller and his lieutenants have
long used a formula in such emergen-
cies. They give themselves a good char
acter, describe their business as 1egiti-
mate and successful, confess that they
make the best terms possible in all bus
mess negotiations, and wind up with The
Tive question slightly modified:
What are you going to do about it?'
'fWell, that IS the question. Uncle sam
must answer, and it is to be presumed
he is ready to do So. If the govern
ment is unable to sustain itself in court
its case will fall and great will be the
Standard Oil's triumph. If the case is
made out in court; If the Standard Oil
is convicted as accused, a long step will
have teen taken toward bringing that
monopoly generally to book. Attorney
General Moody must now get busy, and
in connection with Commissioner Gar
field open up the whole matter.
1.-THE congratuIatory feature of the
SR4SOGE - A4c-tI d Ao-ot1 tAAC kole-A4Ac-AA vi
company must tackle a fellow Of It's
size. Uncle Sam, unless we are all mis-
talzen,is a foeman worthy Of Mr.. Rookie
feller's sseel. And this time we shall
all expect the oil king to stand his
ground. He will probably ind 1t diff
cult to disappear, and set the gossips
wondering whether he may be on his
yacht in South American waters, or at
anchor in the Bay of Naples, or on mis-
private car touring the south Atlantic
states, or playing golf on his New Jer-
sey estate with the approaches guarded
by a segment Of private gentinels- The
processes of the United States courts
run far, and they should reach Mr..
Rockefeller and everybody else whose
testimony may be of value in these
cases.
The president mas done nothing bet
ter in office than this, and he should De-
and likely ill be, supported by men ef
both parties in his effort to both vindi-
cate and strengthen the law"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-05-08
COMMISSIONER GARFIELD.

As was suggested in these columns
recently, Commissioner Garfield ap-
pears to know more than was given
to the public in his Standard Oil re-
port. It is said that the entire report
was given to the public. but some of
the information is being held back,
presumably for use in the prosecu-
tions that are to follow.
This is the same as was done in the
beef trust investigation. Mr.. Garfeld's
report that was public showed what he
found from the books that were ex-
hibited to him by the packers. It
made a ridiculous showing, and one
favorable to the trust of course. In
mediately the country began to abuse
the commissioner of corporations and
the Kansas state senate passed a reso-
luton demanding his removal.
And through it all Mr.. Garfield only
smiled. He said nothing about the
secrets he had discovered about the beef
trust-those We're checked uD to the
grand jury. and later the grand jury
brought in indictments which created
CONSERVATION in the trust. The pack
ers virtually pleaded guilty by claim
ing immunity. and only Judge Hum
phrey's decision protected them from
punishment.
The State Journal has always had
faith in Mr.. Garfield in spite of the
bad showing made by his published
report on the beef trust It believes
that had It not been for the unexpect-
ed decision Of Judge Humphrey he
would have brought the beef trust to
time, and it also believes that he win
now make good" in his fndine-s ron
corning the Standard OIL octonus
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-05-08
EROA4 OTHER PENS
IS THIs TRUE?

When Kansas was suffering from
the visitation of grasshoppers the
whole country united in raising money
and contributing food and clothing for
the sufferers Many mean man was
developed then. The contributions
were so generous that opportunity was
afforded for graft And more than
one man now rich laid the foundation
of his fortune in the cash or goods
which he stole from the relief fund
Much the same thing has been noted
in a smaller scale in the San Francisco
case. 1t is about the smallest business
in the world.=Salt Lake Inter Noun
tain.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-05-08
senator CoclzreIl,s Bait.

Several congressman were indulging
in a free and easy talk on the subject
Of railroad rates. the interstate COM
merce commission, and rebates.
Talking about bait" said a jolly
western congressman, did you hear
about old man Cockrel1s fishing ex-
perienee up the Potomac river, not
long ago? ?"
Senator Cockrell." as he is still
called, went fishing up the Potomac
with Missouri constituent who holds
down a small job in one of the depart
ments, hired a boat, and the consti-
tuent volunteered to row it. After
proceeding about two miles up the
river they anchored the boat by large
stone which the keeper had placed on
board for that purpose. After several
hours Of Ill luck Cockrell decided that
he had enough fishing for one day and
ordered the constituent to turn the
boat homeward. Both the occupants
forgot about the anchor stone. and the
oarsman could not understand why
pulling down stream with tide and
current favoring should be so much
harder than 1t was coming up. Late
in the afternoon the senator and his
friend pulled up at the boat house and
made vigorous complaint to the
keeper about the heaviness and slow
ness of what seemed to be a light craft
The boatman's quick eye discovered
the cause of the hard pulling and he
claimed:
why, senator, no wonder you had
hard pulling! You have been drag
ging your anchor all the way down the
river"
Neither Cockrell nor his companion
was willing to acknowledge his igno-
rance of the fact, and the former in
dignantly declared:
TITS none of your business If we
did; we had right to get some exer-
else even If we didn't get any fish,
Success Magazine.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-05-08
Rainfan and Tree Crown.

A report has recently been published
which shows how closely the growth of
trees is dependent upon rainfall. Not
only was this seen in the case of one
and two year old trees, but IN an in
vestigation extending over a period OF
IL years, during which time the an
nual rings of growth were carefully
examined With an annual precipita-
ton of from 80 to 80 inches a width of
ring was produced varying from II to
10 inch. If, on the other hand. there
was either an unusually large or small
rainfall IN any given year this was
followed by a corresponding tree growth
IN the following year.-Harper's Week
"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-05-08

Even If a publicity bill were to de-
stroy all campaign funds nobody would
suffer except the political parasites
who profit personally from the distri-
button of money. Political campaigns
would go on just the same. The offices
would all be filed. The business of
the government would not be sus-
pended and the public business would
be administered quite as well as it is
now, although there might be less
profit in being a boss.-New York
World
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-05-08
The Man With a Wart.

There is no innpertinence about the
curiosity Of a little child,'' said the man
whose heart is still young although his
hair is gray. Even the toughest Of US
recognize that, and 1 saw a striking
instance Of it the other day. Across the
car from me sat young mother with
a pretty, bright-faced little girl about
years old in her lap. The child was
seemed to miss her eyes. Presently a
shabbily clad man, who had the ap-
pearance OF being soured on the world,
entered the car and took the vacant
seat beside the pair He had a wart
about the size of the end of ones lit
tie finger right over the Orifice of his
left ear It was almost purple and
would have attracted any ones atten-
ton.
'The mother noticed 1t Immediately.
and I saw she was nervous over the
fear that the little one might see it and
make some remark. She tried to shift
her daughter into another position. But
the little one was too quick for her.
She saw the wart and the worst hap
pened-
:. What you got in your carp she
piped in shril treble, her baby face
alive with interest
Everybody in the car seemed to cen
ter attention on the man, and the moth
er's face was study of embarrassment
and anxiety. But the man appeared to
notice no one but his tiny inquisitor.
a smile.
rs it2' said the child. An do you
pay wiz it?' .
Yes replied the man, chuckling
softly. And when I get through play
ing with it 1 put 1t back in my ear
again
oh, do your came the sedate COM
ment. But she was not entirely through
with her investigation. and quick as a
flash came another interrogation, What
you got in Your other ear?,
THE man laughed jovially. With a
pretence of sleight Of hand he appear
ed to take from his right ear a new
nickel.
81 usually keep my carfare there
he said, but III have to give that to
the conductor
Isn't that NICE commented the lit
tie girl.
Then she began to feel her own ears.
to the evident amusement of the other
passengers, but no one appeared to en-
joy II more than the man with the Wart
on his left Exchange.