davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1906-09-08
Things that Can't he Done.

Things that Can't he Done.
They say the following things can't
De done. Try them and see for your
elves:
You can't stand for Ave minutes
without moving IL you are blindfold-
d.
You can't stand at the side OF o
room with both of your feet length
wise touching the wainscoting.
You can't crush an egg when placed
lengthwise between your hands-that
is, if the egg is sound and has the
ordinary shell of a hens egg.
You can't get out of a chair with
out bending your body forward or put
ting your feet under it--that Is, II you
are sitting squarely on the chair and
not on the edge of It
You can't break a match If the
match is laid across the uail of the
middle finger of either hand and press
ed upon by the first and third fingers
of that hand despite Its seeming go
easy at first.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1906-09-08
White Fields.

I love the days in winter
When snow falls all around,
And like soft, white blanket
Is spread upon the ground.
love the days in summer
When daisies are in bloom,
And cover all the meadow
Like a carpet on a room.
And which l think the prettiest
really do not know
When the fields are white with daisies
Or when they're white with snow.
st. Nicholas.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1906-09-08
RrutaI Torture.

Talk about the brutality Of foot.
ball, military drilling is worse
Nothing brutal about drilling tina,
| can see"
why, just short time ago I saw
a whole line Of soldiers broken ON the
wheel. American.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1906-09-08
An Eden UItimatum.

Eve-There's no use talking, Adam,
can't take care OF the children and do
the housework, too. You've got to get
girl!
Adam with resignation) oh, very
well. I suppose this is where I loss
another rib.-Puck.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1906-09-08

there's an exception to this rule
When you are showing Off before com
pany who are at your house your ma
comes and whispers to you on the sly
that she'll attend to your case after
you have got In bed; or, maybe, your
papa whispers for you to leave the
room at once or sooner. These kind
of whispers are called signal whis-
pers. Signal whispers never tickle the
ear as it receives them.
"A good, kind whisper is one that
comes from your chum, telling you
there's to be base ball game on Sat
urday afternoon out at the edge of town,
and that you can go out along with
him and lay on your stummick and
peep under the fence. Another whis-
Jer that | like is when another chum
whispers and tells you to come round
behind the barn and get a bite often
his apple.
After all, though, whisper amt
like nothing else in the English Ian
guagc."
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1906-09-08
A Penny's Worth of Weight.

" CHHy WITH Oh WeIBht.
A young gentleman of our acquaiAt
ance, who has just reached the age
of q, was recently waiting with his
mother for train at a railway sta.
ton, when he noticed a penny-in-t the
slot weighing machine. He asked his
mother a great many questions about
1t, and at last received permission tc
drop in his penny and be weighed
Having obtained that important infer
nation, he said:
How much would l have weighed,
mamma, If | had dropped In dollar?''
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1906-09-08
Been There.

Theo. Riser-A baby in the house 4
a perennial wellspring Of Joy.
Ben Edlct-Thats just it--nsve
dries up.-Cleveland Leader.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1906-09-08

The sale bill is all right as far as 1t
goes, but it does not 60 far enough
Advertising In the newspaper beats II
two to one. A Nebraska farmer tried
the first plan, but was not satisfied
with results. Attendance at the sale
was not up to expectations, and 1t was
postponed for a season. Then a new
date was set and an advertisement
placed In the local paper. This time
people came from all directlons-even
from adjoining States-and the crowd
was so great that the sheriff OF the
county thought he ought to be present
to keep the peace. 1t developed, now
ever, that that official was In attend
ance because his county town had been
deserted and he felt lonesome to re-
main there alone. II you don't De-
lieve advertising pays try to have q
public sale without telling the Pubic
about 1t through the public paper-EA
change
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1906-09-08

Unless a man has unlimited faith hs
should never take his meals In a eheaI
restaurant.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1906-09-08

1t IL easier for the average man I
keep q dairy than q diar1.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1906-09-08

But the day worker acquirss
coin than the day dreamer.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1906-09-08

head, form a perfect canopy Of bios
SONS.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1906-09-08
SHOES FOE

SHUEp 9O1
Mems Sh
toS1.26..
Misses' q
Try w. L..
Chndren1
- til
II | cOul
iactories d
you howe
are made,
why they
wear long
than any
Wherever
Douglas sho
on inc pObN
prices and \
tate. Ask
and Insist II
fast Color {
Write for
W. l.. Doh
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-09-09

domestic duties. and that II the chief CAUSE Of
the servant problem about which hear 50
much Servants rescnt-Quite naturally and
justly-having TO wait upon lazy women whs DO
nothing In the nature of practical work tho
whole day long. Servants are human beings,
and they do not the justice of tndins hard
in the kitchen while their mistresses SIT In tho
drawing room idling over bridge and gossip. ar
rustic past them In fine gowns with a word a
command / sure that II a lady does some
kind OF work-it may be artistic or professional
work IL she lack the domestic hand-heY ser~
wants will labor with good VIII and zeal encour-
aged by the knowledge that while they arc busy
in their own way she Is laboring not less hard
in her way. All our royal princesses are most
industrious women. and maintain the old ideals
OF household life
To understand the economies OF housekeeping
one must go to New England homes where the
wives of judges and public men do not think II
beneath them to supertntend the servants In tho
kitchen and busy themselves with every little
household duty. So was with IN In the old
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-09-09

Rockefeller by mere luck should own all the Oh
OF a vast province. These great monopolies and
trusts OF America viii be doomed when the peo-
pie see that they fools to submit to them
To my mind the poor have more excuse in their
extravaganza than the well to do. Their lives
are generally so gray and devoid of bright
ness that they may be pardOned when they
spend all their poor savings for few brief hours
OF delight. / have sometimes SAID to factory
a rainy day instead of buying that new dress
or that new hat you have set your mind On?'
And they have answered. "Oh. yes. we know Il
Is foolish, and all that, but-well, We want tina
thing and after all one can but die Oncei' I
can understand that and indeed, love the lit
are natural and sweet. / admire the broad hu-
manity of the Old Testament, in such sentences
as "Can the bride forget her attire?" The Puri-
tans made great mistake in crushing out tho
joys of youth. But that is very different
thing from the selfish luxury Of the well TO do
citement and sensation with which people now
seem possessed. One sees u painful sign of this
unhealthiness in the dangerous and exciting ex-
hibtions given at the music halls. where people
go to gloat over some acrobat who risks his life
in some daring feat for their delectatiOn- 1t -
the same sort Of spirit which sends the Spanish
people to watch the horrors of bull fight and
which. in the old days. filed the Roman amphi-
theatres with people lusting for the sight OF
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-09-09

feuda time. We talk about the march OF
democracy. but really the feudal system was a
true kind of socialism
There was nearly the same gulf between class
and class when the lord and lady dned at the
same board as their servants and worked with
them In the house and in the field. differing
from them only to the degree that the servants
had less responsibilities and duties than the
master and mistress.
This great gulf between the classes is one of
the saddest and one OF the most dangerous char
acteristics OF modern society. / confess that
when 1 have been through the factories of the
north of England. and the Ives-the hard,
miserable. dreary lives-of the poor girls who
work there for many hours a day-as though
they were machines-in return for less than a
living wage" l have wanted to apologize to
them The generosity and fOrbearance OF the
poor 10 me astonishing. They give so much
and receive little Yet l doubt whether their
fOrbearance has rot limit IN America II is
already beginning TO De considered 4 crime 10
have too much money. Justly so. in my opinion
1t is crime against society that like
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-09-09

down. SnObbishness and envy have good deal
10 do with il. In every class OF life people want
10 vie With their next door neighbors- They are
not prepared TO lead their own lives according
to their means. II does not matter how large
their income is. they are seldom satisfied. and
their requirements are generally in excess Of
their banking account.
have heard people say. Poor So-and-So. he
and his wife have only got $4,000 year be-
tween them! Absolute penuryT Yet $4,000 a
year used to be considered wealth at one time.
Indeed. in the early Victorian period an income
OF 81 900 OF even $1,000. was considered ade-
quate and comfortable for people in good so
oioty. Nowadays il is regarded as pauperism-
] am sure middle-class people spend a good
deal too much money on food and dress and ex-
trayagances Of all kinds The new fashion OF
dining out at restaurants is one Of their little
foIlies. The French. OF course. have done the
same thing for years. but IN a very different
way With them II Is economy. The French
citizen with his win and family 70 out TO little
restaurant and get good meal al a cheap price.
and save servants wages and hcusehola ex-
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-09-09
LIKE THE CONCORD CiPTAfy.

Senator Tillman accusing political Lead
or of overbearing and arbitrary methods.
He goes too far said the Senator. He is
like militia captain they used 10 have in Con-
cord.
This man came to Concord with war record
ard got a captains appointment in the militia
He was a martinez. The first day h.
viewed his company he examined every hair on
their heads, every button their coats. IL was
an ordeal for them.
ION the whole, the captain was pleased with
his inspection. one thing dissatisfied him.
though. His men all hal clean shaven upper
lips Some had side whskeTs. seine hJd mutton
chops. some had COATES. SOME had patriotic
chin boards There not who had q
mustachc.
The captain cOnplimented his company in
short speech and concluded by saying:
"'Cnly one thing is lacking TO make c~ack.
martial looking company Of You mustaches.
want every man Jack of YOU to raise mus
tache'
AT this order the men looked at On" an
other and n young farmer, stepping out from
the ranks. saIuted and said:
what color Will you have them. sir?'"
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-09-09

feaied In Its nTst race The cost OF running is
comparatively small. equalling that for automo-
bies 81 similar horsepower. or even a little less
Nor is the repair bin likely TO be large on any,
thing but the most delicate OF racers There has
been much talk lately OF constructing engines for
motor boats fitted for the use OF denatured alco-
hol No step has been taken in this direction.
but the authorities agree that some such innoya-
ton is inevitable soon. on account OF the decreas
ing supply OF and increasing demand for gaso-
lene.
One novel feature OF the carnival next week
will be the reliability tests TO be held on the
first day Reliability is IN the nature OF things
more difficult 20 decide than speed. and the con-
tests viii probably be less exciting and spectac-
ular than the regulation races. but of equal in
terest TO the trade and the prospective Gus
toner.
on saturday Venetian fete will be held and
prizes awarded 60 the best decorated and illumi-
mated boats The judges for this contest will be
oihoeTs OF the regular army and navy. Admiral
pected. - - -
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-09-09

by wretched creatures whose nerves have given
way under the stress and strain OF modern ex-
istence, and. on the other hand. We see new PAL
aces Of pleasure like the London Coliseum. with
four performances daily. and the great Hip
podrome OF New York with its rush and excite
ment There Is something wrong somewhere
when We find that IN the hospitals they keep
near at hand remedies for every conceivable
poison. 10 administer promptly to the would-be
suicides brought In every day-young women
who have given themselves to despair through
love affairs. and young men who have been
oyerworried by business troubles Such state
OF things was unknown in the days of our grand
mothers
People do not seem strong enough now to
stand responsibility. They get frightened at the
obligations which their forefathers bore with
cheerfulness, or thought nothing about Young
men. for instance, shirk marriage because they
are not prepared 20 face life with wife and
children a moderate income-or If they
plunge into matrimony and become weighted
with its inevitable cares. they frequently break
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-09-09
THE GIRL AYD THR FORTUNE.

SENATOR Beverage was condcmning a notO-
riously corrupt and VIGOROUSLY plausible capt
talist
The man speaks well" said Senator Bev-
erldge He promises much. If he acted he
talked he would be famous for his goodness.
But alas, he is like the German who nearly
. lost his daughter.
This German, with his daughter, was walk
ing beside a deep stream a summer after
noon. when the young girl. slipping a stone
fell in. And she would have drowned but for
the prompt bravery OF a youth lie. slipping
on coat and shoes. plunged In, and after four
or Eve minutes Of hard work brought the girl
safe ashore.
The old German father was transported
Noble minded youth said he. we do IN
deed owe you a debt OF gratitude A hundred
thousand marks or my daughters hand-chOose;
Which shall il be-?
The youth, who no less wise than brave,
thought to himself that II he took tho daugh-
ter he would some day get the money also and
accordingly without a moments hesitation he
made answer
- choose your daughter -
"A wise choice said the old father. osuiA
not have given you the 10000 mH1A Or I
am only a poor cobbler. bot you mai haye a.
girl and that gladly. Join hands. dear chih6ren-
and receive my blessing
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-09-09
INTERSTATE TROPHY FOR MOTOR RoATS

blood II is a sign OF decadence- The only hope,
In my opinion. for the future of the race Is the
probability that all this unhealthiness is but
passing phase The generation which fills the
asylums and hospitals with every kind OF ner-
vous disease will die out and give way to stur-
der. stronger. simpler race Of men and women,
who will exercise self-resraint and preservs
their sanity. The great body of the nation 10
still 1 believe. sound. We have still in the
provinces a good stock of virile. healthy men
and women from whom To recruit the ranks, out
of which the weak. nervous members of society
will rapidly disappear by the very laws of Ma
ture. 1t is time. however. saw the gravity
of our social diseases before they spread too
deep Why should these exhausted people be
so i'll trained in used and i'll understood?
JOHN OLIVER HOko.4S.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-09-09
OIERCALTION-

You can't do any good work in the world
without offending somebody said Congressman
Isongworth in an address. The man who makes
no enemies is the man Who does no good.
some men but for this fear Of making enc
mics might accomplish something. AS il is. they
remind me Of the dying man who was too eau
ti0us even to make his peace with Providence.
DO you renounoe the devil and all his
works? the minister said to this man.
And the dying man replied in a weak, hest
tating voice:
Please don't ask that. I'm going to a
strange country. and ! don't want TO make my
self enemies"
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-09-09
IT'S HUMAN NATURE.

Madison C. Peters. clergyman and author was
talking 20 a group OF young men.
HAN the wrong things you chaps do no
salo You DO only because they are forbidden.
III you didn't know they were forbidden. II YOU
didn't know they were wrong. they would only
seem 10 you disgusting and repugnant
I strOlled one spring morning in a beautiful
park
Look here said 10 one Of the guards, why
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-09-09

penses But when English speaking people go
to restaurant II In not TO get a cheap dinner,
but expensive one.
Tho old ideals Of economy have been forgotten
tn tho average Engiiah speaking household Now
the middle-clap mother and her daughter Will
not denean themselves by taking q share Of the
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-09-09

This Is One of the Last Articles Written by Mrs Crase
Her Death, Which Occurred in August.


IL seems to me that have reached a grave
crisis in our social history. There Is something
very unhealthy in our social life. a morbid crav-
ing for excitement and sensation revealed In
every class. and shown By the terrible contrasts
In our midst We see on the one hand iunAtie
szylums and hospitals crowded to overfowtng
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-09-09

do you have Keep of the grass" signs al over
the park? You don't seem 10 enforce the rule
No. sir, said the guard. The object OF the
signs As 10 cause the people TO more thoroughly
enjoy being the grass ="
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-09-09
THE HELBURN RINDERY.
IOG- 100 SINIH AVE-.

1866 1913 SIXTH AVE. NEW YORK.
Fine Library Binding Special attaGt;on ven Mt.
Architectural Medical and Books Periodicals.
Special Flexible binding Music Makers ~ ali kILds
Of scrap BOOks Correspondence
Iicited Telephone ass. Gramercy.
La correspondencia de Puerto Rico. (San Juan, P.R.) 1890-1943, 1906-06-21
CRONIQUILLA.

Aver tarde visit6 esta redacci6n la estu-
diantina puertorriquefla, compuesta de
m6sicos de San Juan y algunos de la ban
da de la policfa insular.
Ejecutaron diversos aires del pals con
guitarras, cuatro, bandolinas y fautas, for
mando un coniunto armonioso y deleita-
BILE, sobre todo el cuatro estaba repicGdo
como de6e ser.
FL quejumbroso cuotro dominaba &
veces cuando tocaban "Angelina'' de Rios
Ovalle.
Por un momento podfa hacerse la ilu-
sion de que aquellas notas bajaban de Ia
montana, tafiidas por ell jtbGro, m6sico es-
pontaneo que no tiene idea de 10 que es
ell pentagrama.
Aunque tenfan puesto antifaz, eran per-
fectamente conocidos todos, 81 primero
Agrinsoni, organizador de la estudian-
tina.
Pero salieron bien lfbrados, pues aparte
de los obsequioS y dinero con que fueron
agasajados ell Ateneo les adjudic6 el pre-
milo de $50, toda vez que no Sc present6
otra estudiantina hacer competencia.
Algunas personals Green que las feEtas,
tai como estan preparadas han sido hechas
para Santurce mas que para San Juan y
hasta hay quien opina que Ell progra-
ma result6 aojo, pero muY fojo.
La correspondencia de Puerto Rico. (San Juan, P.R.) 1890-1943, 1906-06-21
NlVEDAOES
EUROPE
Terrible OperaGi6n que fu6 neCesaTiO
praGticaT al IiteIat0 frances IIuys-
mans.
Una mujsr que en- Alicante haGlase pasar pOT q
vIada del general Cuhln0 Antonio MaCe0.

La ex-reina viuda, de Serbia, Natalia,
ha sido expulsada de 50 residences de
Bi8rritz por haber secundado las manifes-
taciones de hostilidad al gobierno, realiza-
das por muchos cat6Iicos fTanceses, con mo-
two de las inventarios de la igleaia.
Al literato frances j. Karl Hugs
mans ha habido necesidad de practicable
una seria operaci6n que le ha privado de
Ia vista.
Seis meses ha pasado confnado en- IN
cuarto obscure, causa del encogimiento
que sufria en- los parpadcs, que dejaban
completamente expuesto al aire y 81 polvo
los globos oculares, produoiendole eee con-
tacto ell exceso de luz, indecibles marti-
rios.
Los m6dicos Sc yieron perplejos frente q
este horroroao 5ilema; cerrarle los ojos
para siempre, dejarle que enloqueciera
de doIor de insomnia con ellos espanto.
samente abiertos. Sc decidieron por el pri.
mer recurso, terrible porque le dejan sin
vista; pero piadoso, porque calmarau SOS
sufrimienfos.
-El liItimo censo leYantado en- Russia
es ell del de febrero de 1897. Ese censo
arroja para todo 81 impeTio un total de
125,64O,O21 habitantes. Esta cifra no
comprende ell gran ducado de Finlandia,
con 2.816, 298 habitantep
En- Turin fu6 inaugurado fines de
MARIO un congreso international de an
tropologfa criminal, con 81 que Sc festej6 81
jubilee de Lombroso, quien fu6 muy fe-
icitado.
Paris ha suministrado hasta hoy dos
presidentes Francia: Casimir Perier y
Felix Faure. Theirs era de Marsella;
Mac Mahop, de Sully; Grevy, de Mont
sous Vandroy; Sadi Carnot, de Limoges;
Loubet, de Marsanne, y Fallieres, de
Mezin.
Faure representaba en- la aeamblea le-
gislativa cuando Sc le eligi6 presidente, al
departamento del Sena inferior, Perier
al Aube No ha habido, pues, elecci6n
presidential con cardcter parisiense.
Sc ha dado al traico en- L6ndres un
ferrocarril tubular que une por baio TERRA
Baker Street Waterloo. Pasa por
debajo del Tamesis 10 recorren los tre-
nes cada dos medic minutes.
La rep6blica de San Marino expert
menta gran actividad polftica; segdn relata
el quinCenario Gel Titano", peri6dico de
la pequefa nacionaIidad enclavada en-
Italia. Sc ha tornado 81 partido demo
crata que pide la revision de la constitu-
ci6n, expedida el siglo noveno, porque no
Sc elige va, conforme q ella, popularmente,
ell consejo soberano de setenta miembros,
pertenecientes por parties iguaies Ia
noblezs, Ia burguesfa el pueblo, y Ia
renovation del consejo Sc hace ahora por
cootaci6n.
-Comunican de Alicante Gel Impair
cial'', de Madrid, que en- esa ciudad ha
fjado su residencia una mujer que Sc hace
pasar por la viuda del general cubano
Antonio Maceo. La atrevida suplanta-
ci6n la han crefdo los que ignoraban que
dona Maria de Maceo falleci6 hace algu-
nos meses.
La correspondencia de Puerto Rico. (San Juan, P.R.) 1890-1943, 1906-06-21
0. del KLALE.
AS E G U R A M 0 S

Que los vinos mas puros. Las
conservas de las mejores fabri-
cas-. Los jamones y salchichones
mas selectos. Las galletas y
bombones mas fnos, Los que
SOS y postres mas delicados. Los
licores y Champagnes mas re.
putados. Las mantecas, mantle
quilIas y aceites inmejorables. Y
los mejores y mas selectos arti-
culos de primera necesidad que
Sc consume en- todos los hogares
de la isla de E uerto-Rico son de la
CASA CERECEDO. as San Fran
cisco 46. GEL COLMADO."
La correspondencia de Puerto Rico. (San Juan, P.R.) 1890-1943, 1906-06-21
WOODS & Co. 82-88 WALL ST.

METILOIDEs- El mejor mas seguro
de todos los especificos hasta ahora con cido
para la cura permanente de todas las enfer
medades de la ureta, va sean 6stas cronioas s
agudas' Contisne el flujo oura por COM
pleto, en- menos tiempos pue ning6n otro pre-
cishtis, eot, Mejor pua las inyecoiones muy
superior al sandalo copaiba Empiezs
Eurtir su efeoto las tres cuatre horas de
haberse tornado.
Los METZ TILOIDES"-son fasiIes de tomar
estan preparados de manera pue no revneI-
ven ell estomsgo nj droducen malos efectos,
De Venta en- todaB las Botioas' Pfdanse
muestras gratis sus tnioos fabrieantes-
Frederick Stearns s. Ca. D. r it, Mich
e. u. A