The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-06-20
This IS A TALE
Of 7. |DO, JAP
Little Brown Man Charged With
Playing Great American
Game.
LONG ON POKER ENGLISH,
SHORT ON UNITED STATES
Sentence Will Be Passed Upon
Conqueror of Russia This
Afternoon.
Chapter Ono.

L, lido, a perilously brown man with
slant eyes and a wealthy hate for the
Russians, escapes the eagle eyes of
immigration officials. the Society for
the Prevention of Cruelty TO Animals,
likewise the Board of Health, and
makes his way from the coast to a
white mans city-Salt Lake. There
he gets job making and artistically
spreading cement His education thus
far amounts 10 few words OF
'pidgin' English, clock-work socks,
ice-cream pants and the knowledge of
the difference between two bits" and
a 'plunk.' Continued in our next.
Chapter Twice.
Our hero has now become fully
Americanized, He plays poker Steps
Will be taken by him to force the Ma
tional Government to recognize his
rights as an American citizen. and he
Is already figuring on how many
genuine kimonaS (madc In Connecticut)
he can buy for exercising. once in so
many times, his inalIenable right of
franchise. He has quit wearing Percy
Piccadilly outfit, and has connected
with the outfit usually worn by the
English-magazine made American
brass knucks, cigarettes, soft shirts,
mushy hats and tan shoes, Look for
the next
Third Spasm.
This Is the finish. Mr.. lido, or I
don't, It's not known which, can speak
poker English much better than Sergt.
Hemple of the police force can spout
United States. He is not quite up
to United States. a revised and cul-
tured style, acquired only by those
occasionally seeing daylight.
lido, or l don't. learned poker Eng
lish, It's said, by the State Of Utah
and the city of Salt Lake In the rooms
OF w. II. Holden, in the D. F. Walker
building. where lido, with four other
students, were 'pinched" last Tuesday
and charged with gambling.
Now, the difference between plain
United States and poker English Is
very great. There are thousands to-
day, It's said. who know not of poker
English. lido, when his case came to
trial Tuesday afternoon, before Judge
Diehl, was long on poker English, but
short on United States. but 1t didn't
take Judge Diehl Very long to scare
United States into the conqueror OF
Russia
Well. to make this long story short,
Ed Blackwell, who claimed to-be a
mere porter In the poker academy, N
p. II, Yost-watch 'em-three O. 'em-
watch 'em-and w. II. Bare. who
didn't belle his name any. as far as
the top of his head was concerned, were
charged with gambling, and after a
wordy match between Attorney Ben
Johnson, for the defense and Assistant
City Attorney DAILY, the court found
the three gamesters guilty. and fixed
the time of sentence today at 2
o'clock.
Then came another lengthy and
wordy encounter between the two
disciples Of Blackstone. in the case Of
w. H, Holden, charged with being the
keeper Of the game. Johnson held that
the city had not the right to frame an
ordinance making It unlawful to play
cards for money. DAILY said that the
city had the right
There the case rests. until today at
o'clock. when the court will render
a decision.
The End.
Learn to speak poker English, the
universal. American language For
terms apply to T. lido. Jap.