davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Evening statesman. [volume] (Walla Walla, Wash.) 1903-1910, 1906-08-20
This Is Good for so cents

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The Evening statesman. [volume] (Walla Walla, Wash.) 1903-1910, 1906-08-20

links the house-mover. Phone 1S46
The Evening statesman. [volume] (Walla Walla, Wash.) 1903-1910, 1906-08-20
Weather FLAGS Flying.

Kennewick has been made a weather
forecast station, says the Courier. The
first in Benton county to be thus nom
ored nv Uncle Sans Weather bureau.
The new age., 1906-08-25

Secretary Taft In discussing a GER
tain hoax, said:
1T reminds me Of the story about
Sir Richard Owen, the famous English
scientist. A. footman came to Penn
broke lodge, Sir Richards residence,
one morning, with a large bone. wrap
ped in a cloth, and with note from
his master, Lord John Russell, asking
if Sir Richard would please say what
animal the bone belonged to.
1T required but glance from the
scientist to convince him that the bone
was nothing but a ham bone from an
ordinary pig. He sent a message back
to that effect, and, meeting Lord John
the next day, said:
why on earth Gid you send me a
pigs ham bone yesterday?
"'I'n tell you,' said the other. Gen.
eral Grant. you know. Is a great joker.
He made me a present Of what pur-
ported to be that rare deIicacy, a grizz-
ly bears ham, but, as had my doubts,
| sent you the bone"
The new age., 1906-08-25
Slang Not All American.

Is 'fired out" an Americanism? This
question is put by London paper in
discussing the use of the expression by
the Vienna correspondent of the Times
in connection with the dismissal of the
American ambassador to Austria-Hun
gary. Anything that seems slangy is
generally stamped as an Americanism,
but in this case, as in so many others of
a similar nature, it is shown that the
phrase can be found imbedded in the
classics of the English language. "Fired
out" an Americanism? Well, In one of
Shakspeare's sonnets, as one Of the
London papers says, you may read:
Yet this shall !. ne'er know, but live in
doubt,
Till my bad angel fire my good one out.
An American school teacher-and
this is another illustration that comes
to mind-decided that his pupils should
drop the word "say" because it was in
elegant. The tendency to begin a re-
mark or a question with SAY" may GER
tainly be overdone, but, as bright
pupil pointed out. If SAY" Is vulgar,
how should we regard the use of it in
the first line Of The Star-Spangled
Banner"-"Oh, say, can you see?"
The new age., 1906-08-25
A CUP OF TEA.

Buying a cup of tea may be a trag-
edy or comedy. Much depends on
the sex of the buyer. This is the way
man buys 1t, says a writer In the
London Sketch. He slides sheepishly
into the shop, takes the seat in the
draft of the door that everybody else
has avoided, and says to the waitress
with a ditfident smile:
'Oh, would you bring me a cup of
tea?"
The waitress, who returns the smile
or does not return 1t, according to the
rule of the establishment in regard to
tipping, brings him his tea, slams 1t
down, scribbles out a check and sails
away.
The man tastes the tea, finds that 1t
is bitter from long brewing, slips out
of his seat, pays the bill and hurries
away from the shop.
Now let us see how a woman buys q
cup of tea.
She marches into the shop with a
| little boy on one side of her and lit
| tie girl on the other.
II want a table for three" she says,
In the manner Of one about to order a
dinner at ten guineas head.
Yes, madam" replies the meek at
tendant. "Will you kindly step this
way"
Mummy" says the little boy, when
at last the party is seated and the at
tendant Is waiting to take the two
penny order, mummy. why has that
lady got a turned-upj nose"
want scone," complains the little
girl.
"a pot Of tea for one" orders "mum-
N.Y." land would you mind bringing an
extra cup, so that my little girl can
have some milk?"
Zone tea and one milk ?" asks the at
tendant
mo, thank you. I thought l gave
my order quite distinctly. l want a
pot of tea for one and an extra cup.
That's all"
"Yes, madam" says the meek at
tendant, and drags herself away with
the firm intention of becoming an ac-
tress, let the stage be what it may.
Just one moment" says mummy"
when the tea is brought. 81 should
like to make sure that this is not too
strong. Yes, 1t Is much too strong.
Will you let me have a pitcher of hot
water, please? And l don't think you
have brought quite enough milk"
Half an hour later she marches
proudly from the shop. having paid
exactly the same sum for these privi-
leges as the wretched man who could
not swallow mouthful, and who sat
In q draft.
The new age., 1906-08-25
The Polite thurman.

In the cities of Burma, where the ma
tfves have been long in contact with
Europeans, says the author of Burma
Painted and Described" they have lost
some of their traditional politeness; but
in the country districts old-school cour.
tesy is still the custom.
An English gentleman who had
bought new pony was trying him out
on Burman road, when the animal
bolted, and ran at top speed down a
narrow road.
In the way ahead was a native cart
in which was family party out holi-
daymaking.
The pony dashed into the back of the
cart, threw his rider into the midst OF
the merrymakers and severely Injured
the Burman who was driving.
Before the Englishman had an oppor-
tunity to explain his unexpected on,
slaught the Burman picked himself up
and bowed low.
"My lord, my lord" he said. apollo.
getically, "the cart should not have
been there"
The new age., 1906-08-25
HGGeEGGGEGesBA333a8:Sa33@u
N OLD 7


We Have Drunk from the same
Canteen.
There are bonds of all sorts In this world
of ours,
Fetters Of friendship and ties of flowers
And true lovers knots, l ween.
The girl and the boy are bound by kiss,
But there's never a bond, old friend, like
this
We have drunk from the same canteen
Il was sometimes water and sometimes
milk
And sometimes apple jack fine as silk;
But, whatever the tipple has been,
We shared it together in bane or bliss,
And l warm to you, friend, when think
Of this
We have drunk from the same canteen !!
The rich and the great sit down to dine,
And they Quaff to each other in sparkling
wine
From glasses of crystal and green,
But guess in their golden potations they
miss
The warmth of regard to be found in
We have drunk from the same canteen !
We have shared our blankets and tents
together
And have marched and fought in all kinds
of weather,
And hungry and full we have been;
Had days of battle and days of rest.
But this memory cling 10 and love the
best
We have drunk from the same canteen
For when wounded l lay on the outer
slope
With my blood flowing fast and but little
hope
Upon which my faint spirit could
Oh, then, remember, you crawled to my
side,
And, bleeding 20 fast it seemed both must
have died,
We drank from the same canteen!
Gen. G. G. Halpine private Miles
O'Reilly).
The new age., 1906-08-25

bevy of WCmen laborers who have thu
leisure will proceed at harvest time
from village to village. and so add a
few more shillings to the modest fam.
lily chest.
Few Egyptian village scenes appeal
more forcibly to the cultivated taste or
artistic sense than that OF the village
maiden fetching water from the river
or the well. The 1.-the. elastic. we'll
developed figure Of the peasant damsel
seems singularly noble In its homely
simplicity, draped In its loose dark blue
garment the beautifully nodded earth
enware pitcher poised upon her shapely
head. Her long veil Of coarse crepe. Ii
is true, Is half drawn to conceal her
face from prying eyes, or, when she
wears no veil-and often, owing to the
exigencies Of field labor, the burko
(face veiD is dispensed with-its Office
is performed by gathering a fold of her
head covering into a corner of her
mouth. Yet the very poor are not al
ways punctiliOus about keeping their
faces hidden from strangers, and so
sometimes one sees the indigo or green
ish-blue tattoo designs on the forehead
or below the under lip. On reaching
the river, where her shadow seems to
kiss the ripples, the modern Rebekah
tucks the skirts of her raiment between
her knees, enters the water to cleanse
O1 h..
then, with a last feminine touch Of ad-
justment TO the folds of her dress, she
raises the heavy burden into position
and bears 1t away, spllling nothing of
its limpid contents. She never loses
her balance, having made a practice
from early childhood of carrying all
burdens on her head and having thus
acquired a naturally upright carriage
and statues1ue gait.
The new age., 1906-08-25
Hia Hard Lmck.

yes" said Mrs. Herlihy, pressing
damp handkerchief to her eyes, hes
an unfortunate man, me Cousin Celia's
man is. If iver there's amy chanst
Of a good thing he's always a little
to wan side. If it hadn't been for that
he'd be In his home now, inStid Of in
the hospital, maam."
why, | understood that Timothy
stepped backward off the staging and
fell clear to the ground" said the dis
trict visitor, sympathetic but puzzled.
He did, said Mrs. Herlihy, with a
fresh burst of tears, "but if he'd fell
q bit more to the right, there was a
great pile O. bricks. an it would have
broke his fall, anyway"
The new age., 1906-08-25
THE FELLAH'S YokEMATE.

some Occupations of the Egyptian
Girl and Woman.
Her lot has improved vastly since
those dark days of superstition when,
In order to propitiate Scraps, the deity
who presided over the waters of Faith
er Nile, she was liable to be given as
sacrifice to the food-custom which
was until quite recently commemorated
at the annual cutting Of the Khaleeg at
Cairo by the erection of an earthen
bride" which was swallowed up by
the rushing waters says the Fort
nightly Review. Albeit the fellows
lines have never been cast In pleasant
places, very early in her existence does
her round of drudgery begin, for while
still tiny child she Is allotted a varie-
ty of tasks. In the clover season one
sees peasant baby girls posted as senti-
nels over the horses and cattle tethered
in the vividly green berseem fields /;
mere children. placed in authority near
a harshly creaking water wheel, fol-
low with toddling steps the wiry little
donkey or gaunt. ugly buffalo harness
ed to wooden prop which Is attached
to the cogged wheel of the sakeeyeh.
The little mites by voice and whip
urge the weary bindfolded beasts to
keep Jogging along in the worn clrcu-
lar track, that the slowy y revolving
earthenware pots cease not to pour the
sertilizlng water into the trough.
The same little maidens, their hair
generally plated and the wisps and
braIds decked with coins, are often
seen tending small serds Of goats. At
times, too, they are sent to forage for
rare windfalls of firewood (rare, be-
cause in the delta wood Of any sort is
scarce), which, If they find, they carry
homeward across the fields on their
| heads, the strings Of beads and glass
bracelets on their fat little necks and
arms glistenlng in the bright sunshine
while those who dwell in woodless
provinces are employed to collect ma
| nure, which, mixed with chopped straw,
| is pounded into round cakes and when
dried in the sun forms the staple native
fuel called "gelleh." Active little maid
ems carry diminutive hods or baskets
| of mortar or bricks when building op-
erations are In progress, or are set to
destroy caterpillars at seasons when
these pests threaten destruction to the
maize or other crops.
Should their village be within easy
distance of a railway. girls of tender
age are sent to hawk goolahs of cold
water, hard-boil eggs or fresh dates
| figs or oranges, up and down the coun-
trysIde stations: and these bright
Iclamoring, smiling, pearly teethed
maldens are pleasantly familiar little
4 figures to all travellers throughout the
Delta. The bigger girls In time OF
wheat harvest will join with the older
women In field labor, which is very ia.
tiguing. as in many districts not only
do they pluck and bind the corn, but
afterwar6 carry the sheaves to the
threshinG place Not infreQuently a
The new age., 1906-08-25
Found He Wa. a C.nptb.1.

A new arrival in the town entered a
restaurant and ordered his dinner. He
had just been served when a large, ro-
tund person entered and seated himself
at the same table, and finally reached
over and helped himself to his neigh
boris bread; seeing that the other mans
boiled potato had not been touched he
took that and ate it without removing
the skin. A piece of chicken followed.
By this time the waiter reappeared
and handed the bill Of fare to the
newcomer.
Roast beef; roast pork. Which shall
l takeY said he. We'll, l guess you
can bring me roast beef, double or
der"
Thank heaven" said the man oppo-
site
"Eh? What did you say, slrY
81 said Thank Heaven l was afraid
you were a cannibal' l''-Pittsburg Press.
The new age., 1906-08-25

quently, and with burning sensation,
They showed sediment. became dis.
couraged, weak, lanquid and depressed,
so sick and weak that could not keep
up. As doctors did not cure me de-
cided to try Doan's Kidney Pills, and
with such success that my troubles
we're all gone after using eight boxes,
and my strength, ambition and general
health is fine.''
Sold by all dealers. 80 cents boz.
Eoster. Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
The new age., 1906-08-25
Pe-ru-na Restores Strength.


Two gentlemen dining in New York
restaurant were surprised to find on
tie bill Of fare, the item, green blue
fish7'
Waiter" one asked, "what sort OF
b'uefsh are green bluefish?"
'Fresh-right from the water said
tie waiter, offhand
Nonsense !" said the man. "You
know well enough they do not take
b.uefish at this season"
The waiter came up and looked al
Tie disputed item.
"Oh, that, siri" he said, with an air
OF enlightenment THAT'S hothouse
bIuefsh, sir"
The new age., 1906-08-25
PafrfOtfam.

Breathes there the man with soul so dead
Who never to himself hath said,
"This is my own, my native land ~
Whose heart hath neer within him burn q
AS home his footsteps he hath turned
From wandering on a foreign strand?
If such there breathe, go, mark him well
For him no minstrel raptures swell;
High though his titles, proud his name,
Boundless his wealth as wish can claim
Despite those titles, power, and pelf,
The wretch, concentered all in self,
Living, shall forfeit fair renown,
And, doubly dying, shall go down
To the vile dust from whence he sprung
Unwept, unhonor'd, and unsung.
Sir Walter Scott.
The new age., 1906-08-25

Byron was writing his English BardG
and Scotch Reviewers"
They'll find I'm no Keats! :" he ex-
claimed. ''I'm a ba-ad man from the
headwaters of Bitter creek, and / can
hit back-darn 'em 20
Regretting that his lame foot was not
a real club, so he could use it on them,
he dipped his pen in the vitriol again and
confded some more of his burning
thoughts to the sheet of paper before him.
The new age., 1906-08-25
catarrh Cannot be Cured

with LOCAL APPLICATIONS, as they cannot
reach the seat of the disease. Catarrh is a
blood or constitutional disease, and in order to
cure it you must take internal remedies.
Halls Catarrh Cure is taken internally, and
acts directly on the blood and mucous surfaces.
Halls Catarrh Cure is not quack medicine.
1t was prescribed by one of the best physicians
in this country for years. and is a regular pre-
scription. 1t is com posed of the best tonics
known, combined with the best blood puri-
fiers, acting directly the mucous surfaces.
The perfect com bina ion of the woingredients
Is what produces such wonderful results in
curing Catarrh. Send for testimonials free.
F. CHENEY 4 Co. Props, Toledo, o.
Sold by druggists, price 75c.
HAll,s Family Pills are the best.
The new age., 1906-08-25
The hook. All Right.

The steamer was to leave in an hour,
and Mrs Lapsling was in furry of pre-
paration.
Mother" asked one Of the children,
where are the books we want to read
while we're on the boatw
Never mind the books" she said, with
her mouth full of hairpins. They're all
packed in your fathers oesopha gus"
The new age., 1906-08-25

'Why are you bowling to that man?
Do you know himT asked Madge, In
surprise.
YES" said her chum. "He walked
over me so many times getting out be-
tween acts at the theater last night that
we got real well acquainted. Detroit
Free Press.
The new age., 1906-08-25
Discouraged.

Sherlock Holmes had announced his in
tention of abandoning detective work.
My dear Holiness" said DR.. Watson,
you don't mean it !"
Quite so, my dear doctor" he said.
Those Philadelphia detectives have made
me look like bungling amateur"
Shooting another charge of dope into
his arm, he assumed William Gillette
pose and stared moodily into the FIRE.
The new age., 1906-08-25
ReCfprOCItY.


81 declare" complained Mrs. DuzZit,
II shall certainly have to punish the
children! !" says a writer in Life. What
have they been up to now?" inquired
her husband
"They have simply upset my sewing
room. Nothing is where it should be.
Needles. spools of thread, scissors, darn
ing balls, everything l have has been
poked away into the most unexpected
corners. 1t is perfectly exasperating.
Mr.. Duzzit surveyed his wife with a
benignant air.
THAT wasn't the children, DEAR" he
said II did that"
"What possessed you?"
at was kindness of heart. After you
Strengthened up the papers and books
on my desk SO beautifully. l thought
it was no more than right that l should
return the compliment by putting your
sewing room in order So | did"
The new age., 1906-08-25
How He Knew,

Wedderly-That milliner of yours
must be bird.
Mrs. Wedderly-Nonsense! She has
neither wings nor feathers
Wedderly-Yes, but just look at this
bill Of hers.
The new age., 1906-08-25
In Condolences

"I knew" he declared, "that we were
meant for each other from the very mo-
ment l first saw you"
II knew it," she replied, "long before
that"
You did?'
"Yes. l may tell you now in conf
dence, since we're engaged and it's all
settled that mamma had been mapping
out our accidental meeting for three
months. Judge.
The new age., 1906-08-25
why 1t Didn't show,

"Has that new friend Of yours any
Business ability?"
''Oh. yes"
"Well, it doesn't show on the sur.
face"
ground railway" - Cleveland Plain
Dealer
The new age., 1906-08-25
In Use,

where's the boa constructor forty feet
lcng that you've got painted on the sign
out in front!" demanded the visitor at
the dime museum.
This is wash day, and we're using
him for a clothes line" explained the Cir
On ssian hpautv
The new age., 1906-08-25

torture | went through
now seems to have
been almost unbeara-
BILE. l had backache,
pains in the side anC
loins, dizzy spells and
hot, feverish head
aches. There were
bearing down pains,
and the kidney secre
tions paesed too fre.
The new age., 1906-08-25
Out at Last.

"Why do they call these dentists Of
fees dental parlOrs?" asked Smith of
his friend.
"Why. parlor is an old-fashioned
name from drawing -room.p
The new age., 1906-08-25
No Trick at All,

Candy Dunn-Do you take any stock
in the story that a man engraved the
entire alphabet on the head of a pin?
Y. Knott-Certainly. He could have
engraved the ten commandments on it.
1t was coupling pin. Ring of.
The new age., 1906-08-25
To Break In New Shoes.

Always shake in Aliens Foot Ease, powder
1t cures hot, sweating, aching swollen feet.
Cures corns. ingrowing nails and bunions. At
all druggists and shoe stores, 25c Don't accept
any substitute. Sample mailed FREE. Address
Allen S. Olmsted, lie Roy, N. Y.
The new age., 1906-08-25
,lMlss R!cNA LEopo9!5|9}y 9!|}y

Miss Ricka leopold, l73 Main street
Mcnasha, Wis. Sec'y Liederkranz,
writes:
"Three years ago nv system was in a
terrible rundown condition and was
broken out all over my body. began
to be worried about my condition anu 1
was glad to try anything which would
relieve me.
''Peruna was recommended to me as a
fine blood remedy and tonic, and soon
found that it was worthy of praise.
GA few bottles changed my condition
materially and in a short time was all
over my trouble.
81 owe to Peruua my restoration to
health and strength. am glad to en-
dorse it,"
Pe-ru-na Restores Strength.
Mrs. Hettie Green, r. K. 6, Iuka,
Ill.,, writes: 81 had catarrh and felt
miserable. l began the use of Peruna
and began to improve in every way.
My head does not hurt me 30 much, my
appetite is good and am gaining in
flesh and strength"
The new age., 1906-08-25

A Danish colony of 800 families Is
seeking location in Mexico. If the col
ony prospers, it will receive large acces
Gions later.
The new age., 1906-08-25

TITO st. V!tus' Dance and all Nervous Diseases
I'll y permanently cured by DR.. KIine's Great
Nerve Restorer. Send for FREE $2triaI bottle and
treatise. DR. r. H Kline Id. 931 Arch St, PhIla, Pa
The new age., 1906-08-25
COULD NOT KEEP UP.
Broken Down, Like Many Another
Woman, With Exhausting
Kidney Troubles.

Mrs. A. Taylor, of Wharton, N. j.,
says: 81 had kidney trouble in it.
most painful and severe form, and the
The new age., 1906-08-25

Mothers will find My-. Winslow's Soothing
Syrup the best remedy to use for their children
during the teething Period.
The new age., 1906-08-25

All that glitters can't be measured
by the golden rule.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1906-02-28
Death of Prof. Langley.

S. p. Langley, secretary OF the Smith
sonian Institution, and known al a
scientist throughout the world, died at
Aiken, S. c., yesterday.
Professor Langley had slight stroke
of paralysis on November %, which af-
iected his right side. He was gradually
recovering from this attack when, on the
advice of his physician, he went South
to escape the more rigorous months OF
February and March.
Professor Langley was Y years Old.
His whole life had been devoted to
scientific work. Several years ago Pro-
lessor Langley conducted series of ex-
periments with & flying machine at
Whitewater, Va, Oh the Potomac river,
the results of which we're watched with
widespread interest. The experiments,
however, ended disastrously. Professor
Langley has been the secretary OF tht
Smithsonian Institution since 1887. lie
was member of scientific societies anC
his published writings include more
than 100 titles.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1906-02-28
The Garside Stock Company.

The audience that greeted the J. 5
Garside Stock Company at the Opera
House last night to witness the produc-
ton of "ihelma," five-act drama OF
life in Norway. went away delighted at
the clear Interpretation of Marie CoFelli 8
famous novel OF that name. The play
last night was undoubtedly the best that
has been presented so far. }. ;. Gar.
side as Sir Philip Erriugton was an ideal
hero, while George Warren as George
[,orrimer was friend seldom found. En-
nest BostWiCk rs Olaf Guldmar, the
Bondi. was all that cou d be asked OF any
one in a similar character, willie Lillian
Barouch as Bretta was excellent. Inc
title role OF Tnelma was in the hands OF
pauline Seymour, who is no stranger TO
Alexandria theaire-goers, who saw her
With the Arnold Stock Company last
season in "a Dau ghter Of Satan. MISS
Seymour in any role is indeed treat,
and her impersonatiOn OF the Norwegian
princess last night was decidedly clever,
full Of pathos at times and then again OF
child.Iike simplicity Miss Seymour's
acting well deserved the commentator
of the audience. The other characters
were all well portrayed The specialtles
we're again of an enjoyable nature ana
were heartily spplauded. "Thelma Is
one OF the strongest dramas tlat have
been seen in this city, and, as whole,
was presented in manner credilaole TO
any company. Three prizes were given
away las night, and will continue to be
given away each night, the first prize be-
ing a handsome bowl ofcut glass Tonight
the company will present "Resurrec
ton" play dramatized from the novel
by Count Tvlstoi This play is full o
good comedy and plenty Of Pathos ant
should be greeted by large crowd. New
speciaties will be introduced.