davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Barbour County index., 1906-04-04

The girl who married man she had
aeyer seen before probably acted on
the theory that IL marriage is lot
terry a long chance is as good as any
other.
Barbour County index., 1906-04-04

Take Garfield Tea in the spring; it will
contribute much to the perfection of your
health, for its use insures pure blood and
a natural action of the liver, kidneys,
stomach and bowels,
Barbour County index., 1906-04-04

If you wish beautiful, clear, white
clothes use Red Cross Ball Blue. Large 2
OF. package, 5 cents.
Barbour County index., 1906-04-04

Are your clothes faded? Use Red Cross
Ball Blue and make them white again.
Large 2 OF. package, 5 cents.
Barbour County index., 1906-04-04

The value of money depends on what il
Is bought with.
Barbour County index., 1906-04-04

When the pleasures of life begin to pail
on man he thinks about getting mar
ried.-N. Y. 1lmes
Barbour County index., 1906-04-04
: Needs Regulating.

Jeweler-I don't see anything the mat.
ter with this clock 1t strikes all right.
Gayboy-That's just what's the matter!
! want You to fix it SO it will strike
eleven for one.-Detroit Free Press.
Barbour County index., 1906-04-04

Some mems lives are continual apologies
fer living
Barbour County index., 1906-04-04
A Positive
CURE
EIy's Cream Balm
Is quickly absorbed.
Gives Relief at Once.

It cleanses, soothes
heals and protects
the diseased mem.
brane. It cures Ca
tarrh and drives
away a Cold in the
Head quickly. Re-
stores the SanseS of
Barbour County index., 1906-04-04

Taste and Smell. Full size so cts, at Drug
gists or by mail; Trial Size 10 cts. by mail
Ely Brothers. Sc Warren Street. New York.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-03-10
WHATS UP NOWP

The editor OF the Deseret News is a
little late in learnang ordinary facts,
but II Is something to note that he
learns them at all. He now puts forth.
In profound wisdom, the propositions
that the Constitution of the United
States is the supreme law OF the land !;
that the laws OF Congress are subject
to the Constitution, and that the Su-
preme Court is the interpreter OF the
Constitution and the Judge OF the va
lidity of Congressional enactments.
testing them by that standard" And
yet II is not a generation ago that this
same News editor. of this platitudinous
verbosity. made an elaborate "refuta-
tion" OF a Supreme Court decision,
which on applying that standard test
TO salutary law, found it to be con-
stitutional.
But since that organ of graft and
lawlessness seldom airs Itself without
purpose. the question is what law is
now about to be contested In the Su-
preme Court as unconstitutional? Can
II be the enabling act for Utah's State
hood. which required that the Constitu-
ton OF this State must contain a clause
forever prohibiting polygamy? II not,
,pho
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-03-10
opics Of the Day
TRAINING BOTH HANDS.

Unrpcr's Weekly.
An interesting discussion Ia being
carried on In England In connection
with the question OF ambldexterity,
there being a certain number OF physi-
clans and psychologists who are recon-
mending that the child should be taught
to use the left as we'll as the right hand
and with equal facility. There are,
however, those who advise that the left
hand should be used only for left-hand-
ed motion. Inasmuch as It is not an
exact copy of the right and must pos
sess corresponding limitations. While
the advanced ambldextrists believe that
In addition to It's ordinary duties the
left hand should be taught to copy the
movements OF the right. such as In or
dinary writing, the moderate advocates
think that. recognizing It's limitations,
the left hand should be made TO do on
the left side similar things. These of
course. would be done by movements In
the reverse direction, and therefore, II
absolute ambidexterity were required,
as In turning n screw or in writing a
screw with reversed thread should be
used and q reversed form OF writing de-
yiScd
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-03-10
NO LIEUTENANT GENERAL

The grade of Lieutenant Ge General IN
the u. S. Army was primarily created
for General Grant. so far as recent
history is concerned though Washing
ton was by special act OF Congress of
May rs. 1898. made Lieutenant Cen
eral, and afterwards by virtue of the
act OF March 3. 1899, he was named
general OF the armies Of the United
States" and the Office and title of Lieu
tenant-General was by this lest-named
act abolished. The act OF February 10,
1855, revived the grade OF Lieutenant
General. in acknowledgment of the
eminent services Of a Major General OF
the army In the late war with Mexico"
this for the benefit of Cen Winfield
Scott; but he was only brevetted to
that rank, and the act provided that
when the brevet So conferred had been
once enjoyed, the rank should cease.
The rank was revived in 1861 and on
March End of that year 1t was con-
ferred upon General Grant, since II
was desired to place him In command
Of all the armies. bet as other Major
Generals were senior to him, 1t was ne
cessary to advance him 10 thu higher
step in order to allay any possible
friction. On July 25. 1866. Congress
created the Office OF General, and It
was conferred upon Grant In 1869.
Congress provided that the Offices of
General and Lleutenant-General of the
army shall continue until there is a va
c2ncy in the game. and no longer"
Sherman becoming General and Sheri-
dan Lleuter ant General. But on Juno
!, 1883, Congress enacted that the Pres
ident might appoint. by and with the
consent of the Senate, General OF the
Army, ITO be selected from among
those officers in the military service OF
the United states most distinguished
for courage. skill. AMI ability" Under
this act Sheridan was nominated and
confirmed as General. At his death
the grade OF General lapsed, but the
grade OF Lieutenant-G General mas been
kept up.
1t has been the evident purpose OF
Congress all along TO have these two
high prizes. OF Lieutenant-General and
of General. won by great and unusual
service to the country. and not be
merely gained by the routine OF sue
ccsslon. Accordingly. the avowed pur-
pose of the lower House of Congress to
abolish the grade OF Lieutenant Cen
eral is quite in accord with the tradi-
tions of the Republic. 1t was not In
appropriate for Schof1cld to be Lieu
tenant-General but after him the sue
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-03-10
EXCELLENT WORK.

That was q brisk and thorough Job
which was done by the u. S. troops
near Jolo, In the determination OF a
band of piratical and incendiary Moros
who have been making trouble on their
own account with our authorities, and
with the friendly Moros. It Is good to
teach the friendly bands that our ad-
ministratlon is strong enough to pro-
tect them, while the determination of
that band OF outlaws will be a whole
some warning to other lawless persons
that 1t will go hard with them II they
break out into hostile acts. It Is les
son that Will long be remembered by
tho Moros.
THIS severe lesson administered to
the Moros Will not be without an ex-
cellent effect upon the ladrones of Lu-
zon, and Samar, Those ruflians
have made themselves extremely Of
fensiye from time to time; they have
never been reconciled to law and or
der, and are not reconciled now, any
more than the Rifflans of northern
Morocco are reconclled to an orderly
life. So the wiping out OF this band
of piratical Moros Will no doubt have
an excellent effect all over the archl-
Dolago
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-03-10
WHO CERTIFIESp

Because the Seattle Post-Intelligcncer
thinks that the testimony adduced be-
fore the Senate Committee on Privileges
| and Elections is fatally conclusive
| against Apostle Reed Smoot, the Des-
eret News has deemed It necessary to
give an editorial certificate OF loyal
character to Mr.. Smoot and the Nor
mons generally.
That is all right, SO far as 1t goes. but
who certifies Penrose? And OF what
value would be q certificate even if he
could get one? Editor Penrose OF the
News Is the man who made his solemn
covenant to two Presidents OF this Ma
tlon and broke that covenant In each
case-still boastingly breaks 1t and de-
fends his infamy and calls 1t virtue. In
his editorial comment upon the Seattle
Post-Intelligencer Mr.. Penrose finds
fault with one of the former Mormon
witnesses at Washington. and condemns
his testimony as that OF a covenant
breaker. probably because in giving
that testimony the witness violated the
obligation of secrecy which had been
placed upon him. If that witness is to
be discredited for this cause. then
everything that Mr.. Penrose says on
the subject OF Mormon loyalty is dis
proved by his uttering It. AS a reli-
gious teacher he Is q hypocrite. as q
citizen he Is forsworn. He obtained
his civic rights and his liberty from in
carceration because OF the oaths which
he has since broken.
When 1t comes to crebllity, when 1t
comes TO observance OF obligation to
Nation and to people. all the apostates
put together that ever left the Mormon
church and betrayed It's secrets are not
under so much deserved odiun as this
one apostolic indorser OF the apostolic
Senator.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-03-10
A GOOD AMENDMENT,

The adoption OF the Foraker amend
ment to the joint Statehood bill was
clearly In the interest of fair play; and
II is creditable to the Senate that the
amendment carried by so decisive a
vote. The amendment referred 10 pro-
vides that the matter of joint State
hood is to be submitted to both Ari-
zona and New Mexico and unless both,
voting separately, agree to the Joint
Statehood proposition, It shall not pre-
vail 1t Is understood that Arizona is
opposed TO this combination. but the
wide-awake hustlers of that Territory
have in the midst Of them an element
that may, In the craze for Statehood on
any terms. prove vastly troublesome.
On a fair vote. uninhuenced from the
outside, there is little doubt that Ari-
zona would with substantial uhnni-
NIFTY vote down the joint Statehood
proposition. But the situation there
has pitfalls. which the good people Of
Arizona must guard warily against II
they would get n true expression from
the voters.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-03-10
TACTFUJ QUAKER.

Black md White.
Some time ago there lived a gentle
man Of indolent habits. who spent his
time visiting among his friends. After
wearing out his welcome In his own
ncighborhood he thought he would visit
a-n old Quaker friend some twenty miles
distant
On his arrival he was cordially re-
ceived by the Quaker. who thinking
the visitor had taken much palms to
come so far to see him, treated him with
a great deal OF attention and politeness
for several days
AS the visitor showed no signs of
leaving. the Quaker became uneasy. but
bore 1t with patience until the eighth
day. when he said to him.
My friend, 1 am afraid thee Will
never come again.
'Oh. yes, / SHALL" said the visitor. "I
have enjoyed my visit very much. and
shall certainly come again
But" said the Quaker, III thee will
never leave. how can thee come again 2"
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-03-10
THE IDAHO WEAPON.

The editors of Idaho papers throw the
Mormon question at each other instead
of firing bullets, as in the case OF the
California newspaper mems quarrel the
other day.
The Occur d'Alene Press is after Col
Avery Moore and says that that gentle
man. the editor of the Welser World
has a love for things polygamous which
often leads him into making himself
| ridiculous. According to the Press Col
| Moore's --latest effort along these lines
! is an attack on Senator Dubois's Lin
coin day speech at Springfield H.. in
which the Senator referred to the polyg-
amous practices of Col Moore's closest
| friends. the Mormons. The Colonel
| thinks II an Infamous insult to the
| State to mention the immoral and un-
| lawful practices OF those people. who
take an oath OF disloyalty in the en-
dowment house along with few extra
| Wives"
1t is evident that the great Issue in
! our neighbor State In the next falls
| campaign will be tho interference OF
| polygamous apostles In politics and the
| inculcation and protection OF the prac-
| tice among their followers. Oyershad-
owed by this VIII be the minor consid-
erations OF forest reserve policy. State
| land scandals and q few other trivial
| things which may we'll walt the solu-
ton of the great problem before they
can in their turn become paramount.
That an impossible breach would be
| created between the political forces of
| the State by the Mormon issue became
assured when Calvin Cobb, William
Balderston and Charles H. Jackson.
who testified to Mormon church control
| In Idaho political affairs. appeared be-
| fore the Committee on Privileges and
Elections of the United States Senate
The shame Of Idaho then and there laid
bare, It was certain that the chief ques-
| tion for political settlement In the year
of 1906 would be the relation OF the Nor
| mon presidents office IN Salt Lake City
| Idaho
| The tense aggravated mood OF the
| newspapers confirms the earlier judg-
ment. and there is likely to be q break
| Ing on party lines and soldiflcation
OF those elements of the State which
are determined to rid Idaho of alien and
ecclesiastical Interference in politics
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-03-10
Short Stories
THE HOT WATER CURE

Cleveland Plain Dcnlcr
DIR. William Osler Is always exceed
ngly precise In his directions to pm
tents. according TO the Woman's Homo
Companion. He relates an experience
which brother practitioner once had
which illustrates the dangers Of lack Of
precision.
A young man one day visited this
doctor and described n common malady
that had befallen him.
THE thing for you TO do" the physi-
clan said. "is to drink hot water an
hour before breakfast every morning"
The patient took his leave and In a
week returned.
well how are you feeling" the ply
siclan asked.
Worse, doctor, worse. II anything"
was the reply.
"Ah Did you follow my advise and
drink hot water an hour before break
fact7"
II did my best. sir" said the young
man, but / couldn't keep 1t up more n
ten minutes at a stretch"
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-03-10
SOMEWHAT INDIGNANT.

United States Senator George .. Per-
kins of California seems To have dis
pleased his people at home while pre-
senting that petition from the good
Women OF his State asking that Apoe-
tie Smoot be excluded from the Ma
tional lawmaking body. According to
the New York Tribune the distinguished
Senator from California was roundly
denounced by the Methodist ministers
last week In San Francisco. and rcso-
lutions were adopted urging him TO
vote for expulsion.
Naturally the Senator cannot be cx-
pected to accede to this request un-
less in his Judgment, the showing made
against Apostle Smoot shall be sufii-
Client to demand that action. But new
ertheless the resolutions were pertinent
and the Indignation was not unnatural.
1t Is seldom that q Senator. being re-
quested by a respectable body OF the
people of his State. to present q petl-
tlon accompanies that presentation by
any remarks in bad taste; and. how
ever fine, patriotic and considerute may
have been the motive prompting Sena-
tor Perkins to talk at the time he Of
fercd the book OF petitions from Call
fornia, his people at home were quick
to recognize that he had transcribed
the proprieties of the case by misstat-
ing the character OF the protest against
Smoot
The Methodist ministers denounced
the idea that religious prejudice Is at
the bottom OF the case against Senator
Smoot They. like nearly all other In
telligent commentators upon the stun
ton. recognize and assert that no ques-
tion OF religious faith Is involved, and
that the sole Issue Is the loyalty or die
loyalty OF Reed Smoot, apostle OF the
Mormon church.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-03-10
HOW TO FIND A GAS LEAK.


The folly of hunting for leak In a
gas pipe with a lighted match Is not so
much because OF the danger of an ex-
plosion as Of other damage. as is shown
by the experience OF a West Philadel-
phia householder last week One or
two small leaks were detected by going
over all the pipes and holding a lighted
match to them. The smell of gas
ceased. but was replaced few hours
later by the smell OF burning wood.
Another visit to the cellar showed a
charred floor Joist a little distance
above a gas pipe, There was no ap-
parent cause for this until q very close
examination discovered that a tiny let
OF gas was issuing from the pipe be-
meath the beam. 1t was lighted, but
was so small as to be blue In color and
nearly invisible. 1t had been lighted
by the match used In the first lnvesti-
CATION, but had not been noticed.
IF that leak had happened to be m
lead joint Instead Of an iron connec-
tion," said a gas man. there would
probably have been work for the fire
department The smallest possible let
of lighted gas issuing through lead will
In time heat and melt the lead and
make the leak larger until q big flame
Is Issuing. This may make q fire hours
later, In the dead OF night or at a time
when no one is In the house. The only
proper way to look for these very
small leaks Is to paint the suspected
Joint with a smooth soap lather. Just
as In the case of 4 bicycle tire. the tin
lest leak Will blow a bubble In the lath-
er, and there you are"
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-03-10
JUMBLE OF LANGUAGES

There are towns In Hungary. and
small towns, too. where from seven to
ten idioms are constantly being used.
On the Galacian frontier there is In IL
lovely valley the old town of EperJes.
The number OF its inhabitants does not
exceed 10000. To this day the good
people OF Eperjes are in the habit OF
talking or being talked to In six diff
ferent languages and several dialects.
An ordinary household Will include a
SloVak man servant, Hungarian
coachman, German cook and a Polish
chambermaid. What is still more re-
marknble, each grade OF society clings
TO It's own language for centuries.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-03-10
MARRIAGE WITHOUT GROOM.

FiOusIOn POsI-
One OF the most remarkable stories of
love and marriage OF recent date has
Just been reported from Tunis, II is
the story of an Italian girl who mar
ried the man she loved" despite his
absence from the ceremony Th girl
became passionately fond of an italian
named Milheggi But as he refused to
marry her she stole his papers and In
duced another man TO impersonate him
This man was married to the girl at the
cathedral at Tunis last October In MIL
heggfs name and Mllheggi himself
would not have known he was a mar
ried man II he had not been summoned
for n debt contracted By the wife.
The latter produced her marriage certi-
ficate in court and then the whole story
was revealed.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-03-10

ard which Congress had earlier set up,
and had maintained unbrokeniy until
the time of his retirement; while to ap-
point others who are In the apparent
line OF succession to that office would
be a good deal of a travesty on the
position.
The upper roster In the army. like
nature, abhors q vacuum: there Is al
ways n full list. In the nctive service,
and we have achieved to a practice
that is not altogether commendable, OF
promoting officers on the eve Of their
retirement, to the grade of Brigader-
General. so that they Will draw higher
pay on the retired list There are now
on this retired list. two hundred and
forty-four Brigadier- Generals. twenty
Major Generals, and three Lieutenant
Generals. There arc on the active list
twenty-six Brlgadicr- Generals. eight
Major-Generals and one Lieutenant
General. Taking In the general officers
on both lists. we are now carrying
General to every two hundred men In
the army. which is almost as bad as
the bunko republics of Central and
South America do, where we make
sport OF every little squad Of soldiers
being commanded by q General.
1t Is good to see that the House Is
moving to abolish the prize grade. so
that 1t shall be kept for great and
acknowledged service. and while 1T Is
about 1t. perhaps 1t would be just as
well to reduce the number of Major
Generals on the active list to three.
and of Rrigadier- Generals to twelve.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-03-10
A LOGICAL DEDUCTION

New Orleans Times Democrat.
THE day OF careless childhood"
So mortals clamor when
They grow a trlfle older,
'Ah. we were happy them"
when we were youths and maidens,
These mortals all aver
When they are much mature,
How very glad we wcrer'
When We were men and women"
Grown older. they agree,
"In prime of life how happy,
How happy. happy wei"
And ever backward glance they,
Unto the very end;
Tho seasons given are seasons
That all do most commend
or which plain facts the logic
Is patent and sublime.
Were always happy though we
Don't know II Mt the time,
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-03-10
A SLIGHT ERROR.

Chicago Chronicle.
Helen Gould. while recently inspecting
n hospital In which she is interested.
praised the professional nurse and told
q story 70 illustrate how much depend
encc could be placed upon the anna
teur's skill. A surgeon hurrying along
q quiet street found Il man PROSTATE
and groaning- He had fallen and broken
his leg. Beside him knelt young wo-
man who had torn up her skirt and
bandagcd the injured limb. The sur
geon examined the bandage. "Admira-
bly, done" he remarked drily. but you
have bandaged the wrong leg"
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-03-10
A GOOD FORGETTER.
Minneapolis Tribune.

WIpneapoIIs Iribunc.
Johnny" asked the teacher, ''how
much Is seven times nine?"
II don't remember"
Who discovered American"
II did know, but 1 forgot
What's an isthmus?"
Il don't remember"
You don't remember! Take your
seat, sir. You'll never amount to any
thing in this world"
But he did. He Is now drawing
$4,000 per year as chief forgotten for
q large corporation.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-03-10
BABIES, VEHICLES AND TRUCKS

Is a baby carriage a vehicle2 That
question is now agitating Youngstown,
O., where a municipal ordinance forbids
amy person to propel any wind of a
vehicle on the sidewalk" The other
day teamster was arrested for driving
his wagon upon the sidewalk. Stung by
the processes of the law, he has de-
clared that there shall be no discrimi-
nation, and he demands that every
mother and nurse and father who Is
guilty OF the heinous offense of trun-
ding n perambulator on the walk shall
be similarly treated. Consequently
there Is great rustling of the leaves of
law reports and dictionaries and
Youngstown society is deeply stirred.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1906-03-10
Where The Tribune Is on Sale.

Murray. Utoh-ESNcolslor staty Co, Ind
'Shono 177-L
New York-Arthur Hotalns Broadway ana
Thirty-cishth Street, Astor House, Whdorf-
Astorin. Imperial Hotel.
Chicago-Palnicr House. Auditorium Annex
Washington-Ncw Willard. Raleigh
Omaha-Union Station Newsstand
portland-OrcEon Nows Agency
Los Angclcs-Amos's News Stnnd- -
Son Frnncisco-Arjngs Nows Agency. N.
iwhcatlcy. Hotel St Francis, Foster OreaT-
Seattle-W. Fills, Hotel Northern. j. H Jus-
tioc. Wilson. McVey Co.
DonVer-Julius PlacR. Brown Hoto- kendrick
Book and Stationery Co.
Bolsc-Idarhn Hotel. Boso Book and Music
Store. Arch. Cunningham Co.. IL seller
6 Co
Pocatello-cbunce & Co. II. II. whitticsey-
Tonopah-O'Ncll Co, a. Il Rounswen
Goldneld-HuEter Adv. & Pub. Co, u. n
Marsh
Euttc-Kccfe Bros, J. @. Evans
Provo. Utah-A Y. Robinson. y East Center
Street