davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1906-07-27
A DIFFERENCE.

Teacher-Massachu is called
the Bay State
Tommy (whose father runs livery
stable)-It's sorrel on the map,
ma'am.-Philadelp Bulletin.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1906-07-27
DR.. CUPID'S FEE.

DIR. CUP1DS FEE.
I had little tickling in my throat,
1 took little troche and it went;
I didn't call a doctor, as you note,
And all the tickling cost me was a
cent.
How fortunate I caught no dread
disease
To rob me of my wealth and health
and ease.
I had a little tickling in my heart,
l took a little troche, but alack!
The doctor diagnosed and found a
dart
Embedded in my torpid cardiac.
The case is quite incurable, anent,
But all the tickling cost me was as
sent.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1906-07-27

ON THE VAUDEVILLE STAGE.
First Comedian told my barber
to order new mug for me.
Second Comedian don't blame
vou.-Philadelphia Bulletin.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1906-07-27

10 TOD me OF my WealLn anu nedltu
and ease.
I had little tickling in my heart,
l took a little troche, but, alack!
The doctor diagnosed and found a
dart
Embedded in my torpid cardiac.
The case is quite incurable, anent,
But all the tickling cost me was as
sent.
ON THE VAUDEVILLE STAGE.
First Comedian told my barber
to order new mug for me.
Second Comedian don't blame
vou.-Philadelphia Bulletin.
A DIFFERENCE.
Massachusetts is called
the Bay State
Tommy (whose father runs livery
stable)-It's sorrel on the map,
ma'am.-Philadelp Bulletin.
EARNED IT. i"
"And now l learn that she merely
married me for my money; what do
you think of that?"
II think she ought to get it,
Houston Post.
SHE IS LECTURING
Madge-What became of that ad-
vanced girl who advocated the retire
ment of persons who had acquired
competency?
Majorie-She is lecturing now on
the idle rich.-Puck.
FOR VARIETY SAKE.
Mr.. P. Latitude-Things are seldom
what they seem.
Mr.. P. Llainface-No; for example,
a cinnamon bear steak is not at all
like spiced roast beef.-American
Spectator.
A FAIRY TALE.
Cinderella had squeezed on the
slipper and was trying to look pleas
ant
Wonderful" said the Prince.
"Yes," said Cinderella under her
breath, set really is wonderful what
one can do with a shoe-horn. Town
Topics.
A VARIATION.
"'Please, SIR" said the office boy,
me gran 'mudder-"
"Is dead, is she?" snorted the boss
testify.
mo, sir. She wants me to take her
to de ball game"
He got off.-Los Angeles Times.
WHEN HE PLAYS IT.
$50 Crabbe plays the cornet, does
he? l didn't think he was particular
ly fond of that instrument"
81 don't think he is particularly
fond of it, but merely that he's found
the neighbors are particularly oppos-
ed to it."-Philadelphia Ledger.
A HUMAN WEAKNESS.
The Great Mans Wife-Well, my
dear, | don't think soul recognized
you at the theatre this evening. It's
just what you have hoped would hap
pen sometime.
The Great man-Yes, my dear,
noticed it. But I'm afraid didn't
enjoy it nearly as well as l expected
I would.-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
MORE OF HIM.
Miss Mugley-The idea of his call
ing me homely. l may not be very
pretty, but I'm certainly not as home
ly as he is.
Miss Pert-No dear; but that's sim
ply because he's bigger than you
Philadelphia Press.
DIVISION OF LABOR.
Lottie-Oh, well-let's kiss and
make up!
Dottie-All right, dear. I'll do the
kissing, but you've had more expert
ence with the other part of the pro
grame.-Cleveland Leader.
EXTREMES.
Clipper-It isn't safe to think
man a lunatic merely because you
don't understand him.
Flapper-That's so. He's likely te
be either genius or magazine
poet.-Town Topics.
FIGHTING FAMILIES.
"My ancestors were all soldiers
Bridget"
Indeed, were they, ma'am?"
Eyes; do you know what 1t is tc
come from fighting family, Bird
get?"
Sure l do, ma'am. That's why
left my last place, ma am!"-Yonker
Statesman.
CAUSE FOR WRATH.
my husband and 1 had an awful
quarrel yesterday"
The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1906-01-25

the government printing Office so that
watchmen, firemen, elevator conduct
ors, laborers and other miscellaneous
employees shall be paid compensations
not exceeding those paid by the ex-
ecutive departments for the same
work.
The public printers attention has
been called to the statement that the
number of supervisory and unskilled
employees In proportion to the skilled
artisan force has largely increased in
recent years and he is directed to
make careful investigation into this
subject.
The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1906-01-25
6bs Nebraska Independent

tee, under direction of the head of the
department, to see that unnecessary
matter is excluded from reports and
publications; to see that copy is care
fully edited before and not after go
ing to the printing office; to do away
with the publication of unnecessary
tables and to require that statistical
matter be published in condensed
and Ineligible form; to supervise
the preparation of blank forms; to
require the frequent revision of mail
ing lists to prevent duplication Of
printing by different bureaus; to ex-
clude unnecessary illustrations from
department documents and to prevent
the printing of the maximum edition
allowed by law when smaller edi-
ton will suffice; to recommend to the
head Of the department for inclusion
in the recommendations contained in
his annual reports needed changes in
the statutes governing department
publications.
The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1906-01-25
PRESIDENT WOULD PUT CHECK
ON EXCESSIVE EXPENDITURE.
Statistical Matter to Be Published in
Condensed and Ineligible Form
And Only Necessary illustrations
Used-Reports to Be Edited.

Washington, Jan. 21--To do away
with unnecessary printing originating
in the departments and to improve
the form of the annual reports and
other department documents, the
president has issued the following
instructions applicable to all the ex-
ecutive departments:
Advisory Committee
There shall be appointed by the
head of each of the executive depart
ments an advisory committee on the
subject of printing and publication.
The chairman shall be an assistant
secretary Or other qualified official,
and at least one member of the COM
mittee shall have had practical ex-
perience in editing and printing.
1t shall be the duty of such commit
The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1906-01-25
Forms Of Annual Reports

The president also has directed that
the following general principles shall
hereafter govern the form of annual
reports of the various bureaus and
Offices of the departments:
l. Annual reports shall be confined
to concise accounts of work done and
expenditures incurred during the
period covered, with recommends
lions relating to the future, including
plans for work to be undertaken.
2. Contributions to knowledge in the
form of scientific treatises shall not
be included in annual reports.
3. Illustrations in annual reports
shall be excluded, except (a) maps
and diagrams indispensable to the UNI
derstanding of the text, CD views of
monuments of important structures,
(c) views showing conditions in out
lying possessions of the United States
and relating to work done or recon-
mendatiOns made.
The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1906-01-25
ODE Omaha Daily News....
ODE Nebraska INDEPENDENT.

political question discussed
the
partisan bias
If believe that The Independent
friends about this to
The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1906-01-25
Ole Free Pass Bribery SYSTEM.

Nearly every state has its free pass or
ganization. All the pass holders are or
ganized into a political force. The people
do not know it, but there is such an
organization in nearly every precinct
ward, county and state in the entire coun-
try.
This free pass organization is used as a
police force for the railroads. 1t is or
ganized to protect the railroads in their
extortionate freight and passenger charges
and in the low taxation of their property.
This pass organization dictates nominal
tionS. 1t sets up weak and plant men
and pulls down strong and independent
men. 1t builds up or destroys cities and
private enterprises at will. 1t other
words, it is the real master of destiny
both in politics and business.
That this bribery system must first be
destroyed before we can get back repre-
sentative government again and get
wholesome legislation is the contention of
the author in this book.
Mr.. Berge the author was candidate
for governor of Nebraska in 1904. He
made the railroad question the principal
issue of this campaign. He has given 1t
exhaustive study and no one is better able
to write upon this subject than he is.
Livery man in office and every aspirant
The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1906-01-25

has been Investigating the subject by
his direction. This report was made
public today.
cost-keeping System
Among the administrative changes
in the printing office recommended by
the committee are the following:
The installation of cost-keeping
system in the government printing
office, and the employment of expert
assistance in installing such a sys-
TEN; the keeping of efficiency records
to weed out incompetent persons; the
adjustment of compensations paid at
The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1906-01-25
Reports Of Subordinates

4. Inserted matter written Or COM
piled by persons not connected with
the reporting Office and biographical
and eulogistic matter relating to the
past or the present personnel of the
Office, shall be excluded.
5. Reports Of officers who do not
report directly to the head of an ex-
ecutive department shall not be
printed in the annual report of de-
partment, but where necessary shall
be summarized in the reports of the
officials to whom such officers do re-
port.
6. Tables shall be inserted only
when verbal summaries and state
ments of totals are inadequate, and
complete text of laws and court de
cisions shall, except in cases of great
importance, be excluded.
Z. Detailed descriptions and lists OF
methods, processes, purchases, bids
reflections, installations, repairs, spec
ifications and personnel employed
shall be omitted except when required
by their unusual Importance or by
The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1906-01-25

The president also announced that
he will appoint a general committee
on book making, advisory to all the
departments, to consist of the libra
rian of congress as chairman, the
public printer, a representative of the
department doing the largest amount
of printing and two printers not in
the public service, of large experience
in making good books, who are to
serve without compensation other
than their travelling expenses. This
committee is to be appointed to pro-
mote the economy, utility, appropri-
ateness, beauty, durability and so far
as practicable, the uniformity of the
government publications. This COM
mittee is not to deal with the con-
tents of publications, but solely with
their forms, size, style, paper, type,
makeup and binding.
This action of the president is the
result of q report made to him on
the public printing by the committee
on department methods, popularity
known as the Keep committee, which
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-05-28
Women in the Cburc bes.

Mrs. r. s. Macarthur has just returned from
the Northern Baptist anniversaries in Dayton.
ONO, which she attended a delegate from Cal
vary Baptist Church, in 9th street. Mrs. Mac
Arthur. who is president of the Baptist Woman's
Home Mission Society, of this city, and vice
president OF the National Woman's Home Mis-
sion Society. conducted the Round Table Confer
ence at the meeting in Dayton. at which much
consideration was given 20 plans for raising the
full 100000 needed for the new training school.
The report of Miss Mary G. Burdette. treas
urer, showed the expenditures of the year 10 be
S33, 1871 43. Addresses We're made by two colored
workers, Mrs Mary Flowers and Miss Rebecca
Carter Miss Martha ]. Eames related her ex-
perience In the San Francisco earthquake. and
described its blighting effect upon her Chinese
work Miss Anna Brinkman spoke of the work
among the Germans: Miss Lyde Jenkins, OF the
Slavic work; Miss Isabel A. H. Crawford, mis-
sionary to the Kiowa Indians, introduced three
and a woman, who spoke and sang in their
own tongue; and Miss Mary Mclean, of Sunlight
Mission to the Hopi Indians, introduced two
members of that tribe. who spoke in English.
Eight young women from the Baptist Missionary
Training School spoke, among them an Italian
German and a Swede. The dominant thought
OF all the session the new training school,
The first supper given by the recently organ
tied Ladies' Parish Aid Society of St. AIMS
Church for Deaf Mutes proved a most enjoyable
affair. under the management OF Mrs. Fox. The
society is divided into four chapters the Altar
Chapter, in charge OF altar and church vest
] ments, Mrs. M. Buhle. chairman; the Maternity
Chaptef, 10 supply clothing for infants and a
baptismal outfit. Mrs. +. V Brown chairman
the Dorcas Chapter, to assist the sick and needy,
.hIs. J. +. foK chairman; ana the Fair and En-
! tertainment Chapter, TO arrange for and manage
fairs and entertainments. Miss G. Turner. chair
man.
The sunday Nursery Kindergarten was intro
duoed yesterday IN Beekman Hin Methodist
Episcopal Church. No. 3I7 East Both street
the Rev Edwin Whittier Casweli pastor This
ldea was carried out successfully by Mr. Cas-
Ven N The Simpson Church AT Los Angeles.
nHe'i nc served as pastor. and again in
Trinity Church, Norwich. Conn. The la,as.-
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-05-28

DR.. DunneH in Anniversary Sermon
Denounces Institutional Effort.

old All Saints Episcopal Church celebrated yes
tCr1ay the eightysecond anniversary of its estab-
lishment and incidentally the rector. the Rev DIR.
w n Dunnen. took fling at institutional effort
IN the Church in general He had never counte-
ranced such movement in the parish in his thr-
ty-fve years of administration, he said, and he
deprecated the establishment Of guilds. cadet corps
and the like distinctly enerVating to the ss7r-
it,,aI life of a parish. Other parishes in neghbor-
hoods much more favorable to Church existence
had died despite all institutional and other efforts
tn keep them alive, and yet, entirely without such
effort All Saints still breathes."
There came despite the storm. number of old
time members hack to All Saints to help in the
opp{versary comnlernoration. In the congrega ton
was n daughter of the first woman who took COM
munion at the altar of All Saints
As n text DR. Dunnen chose the eleventh of
the third chapter of the first epstle of St Paul TO
the Corinthians: For other foundation can no
man lay than that is laid which is Jesus Christ
He said. in part
St Paul doubtless foresaw the time when many
earnest men would be weepng over the prevalence
tutional work: In the work OF countless parishes
hide the main point at issue. They are ethical at
best end not spiritual. these associations guilds.
Doubtless the writer when he penned the text
that matters would would come 10 such pass that
10 warn their clergy against these things. II is
n RSf az yc is to &c Gms nc SAY ten m
IN the dance that Is TO take place In the parish
service in the church to-day.
The good Bishop OF Western New York who has
had a wide experience with all phases Of Institr,-
tional work. has at length. with the fun authority
of his episcopal voice. warned his clergy on mis-
score Your rector has steadily ahstoinaT
though he has with some OF you shed many a bit
ter TO see some of the youth OF the church
neglecting spiritual matters for some "tuppenny
society.
Dr.. Dunnen told his hearers that. even though
their numbers are small and constantly beIne
depleted by migrations uptown and TO the newer
sections. they should keep stout heart For" he
said there were once but twelve followers, and
one OF these was q traitor
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-05-28
COOPERATIVE CLUBS.
Miss Barnum Looks to Them to Solve Living
Problem of Working Girls.

Among the numerous plans now under colsldei"-
ton the relief OF the intoerable conditions u
der which the small salaried working girls must
live is one for small cooperative clubs. These
might he started with but little effort or ex-
pendture of money and the plan is therefore more
Immediately practical than some of the others
which have been proposed by phanthropists The
idea emanates from Miss Gertrude Barnum organ
izer of the Women's Trade Union League and
though nothing definite has been done as yet 1t
has met with much favor from those interested in
this problem.
Miss Barnum got her idea from the Jane Club, OF
Chicago which though it has grown 70
membership of forty-eight, with commodious
home. began with eight girls in an ordinary nat
Named for Miss Jane Adams, it grew up under
the wing of Hull House. and Miss Adams secured
the financial backing necessary to make the start
II IS now quite self-suppOrtlng, ana has Deen SeII-
DAYS Miss Adams was frequently calleu upon 10y
advice. The proximity OF Hull House was, in 1act'
the means of averting shpwreck on several occa7
sions. But everything runs smoothly anu
new members are chosen with great care. with 4
view maintaining the status quo The girls take
turns AT running the housekeeping. make their own
49, "a bave freorent hoijse meetings for the
discussion of their domestic affairs. The expense
is about So a week for each member: go,
The lane Club occupies large brick bulldlng.
with single and double bedrooms, numerous paths
and pleasant reception rooms With Hun HouSe
Just around the corner, the members have the ac-
of the lessons, concerts anu
given there, and the contrast between their NE
aud that of the average working girl is as striking
as il is painful those who know what tle latter IS
In is worth mentioning also that there have been
MANY marriages from the Jane CLUB, since the iach
OF matrimonial opportunities IN the worklng elra
life is of the things OF winch heI AIeiAuS CUM
plain most bitterly. -,
Miss BarruIn thinks that acknowledgement is ao-
this kind, self-respecting working girls natur-
ally dislike any odCr of patronage or charlty.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-05-28
WoMAN's BODY FASTENED TO WHARF
Finder Thought to Have Put 1t There -
Canalboat Captain Sought.

The body of woman. later identified that of
Bessie Marks. who had lived with canalboat
captain. found nailed by the skirt to a lumber
wharf in the Harlem River yesterday. 1t is as
sumed that some found the body floating in
the and fastened it the pier, not caring to
be mixed up in the case. There cord tied
around the neck, and the condition OF the body
indicated that it had been in the water for a con-
siderable time
Patrolman Leahy of the Alexander avenue sta
ton found the body at the wharf. Charles Moore,
a Waterman the wharf, said he knew the
up at coal wharf at 138th street, and that he
drank with her about March 49, Coroner Schwan-
necke decided to hold him a witness, whereupon
he tried to strike the coroner. He was taken to
the Alexander avenue station, but later released.
DR.. Riegelmarn. a coroner's physician. performed
an autopsy, and said the body had been in the
water too long to determine what caused the death
although the fact that the lungs were free from
water indicated murder The police looking
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-05-28
WILL JfEET TO URGE LOOP
Eff 0rtS to Haze Gathering TONIGHT
q Large One.

Advocates of the bridge loop plan are exert:nq
themselves to bring large attendance of those
in favor of the project at the meeting of repre-
sentatves of civic bodies with Bridge Commissioner
Stevenson in the Kings County Courthouse this
evening
While expressions of approval have come from
practically every quarter, some fears have been ex-
pressed by leaders in the movement for the loop
that a few dissenters will endeavor to make n
showing of disapproval. That danger from this
source may be reduced to a minimum. and lest the
sentiment of the majority fail of a proper repre-
sentation because of too great confidence that the
plan will go through anyhow. its advocates
asking their friends to be hand, at the cost
of Inconvenience to themselves. The fact that the
meeting will be open not only to representatives of
boards of trade, taxpayers associations and sim
liar civic bodies. but also 10 citizens generally who
are interested in the traffic development of Brook
lyn outside of these organizations. will make pos
sible large attendance of supporters of the loop
plan
Edwin S. Piper, president of the Allied Boards of
Trade. expressed the conviction yesterday that OPP
position. if any. at the meeting would be slight.
with hardly any exception" he said, all the
boards of trade and taxpayers associations that
know anything about. and am in close touch with
all of Them are in favor of the Stevenson loop. L
have heard something OF Mr.. Colers intending TO
submit another propositon-that perhaps OF tun-
mel from Harlem to run down Fourth avenue. With
all due respect to Mr. Coler, must say that by it
self that may be very good thing but it does not
take the place Of the loop at all"
George c. Miller. treasurer of the allied boards,
said that any who would oppose the loop plan
now was acting to the detriment of all Brooklyn.
George NJ Schinzel. president of the Rdgewood
Board of Trade one of the first to reawaken inter,
the loop project. said that he would all
those interested in Brooklyn's traffic conditions to
attend the meeting. Opposition 70 the loop plan.
guarding against. If hostility TO the Brooklyn
Rapid Transit were the motive of opposition, he
plan. such opposition would be unreasonable. BE
cause doesn't like the B. r. T. is reason for
venting his spite in way hurt all Brooklyn
said Mr.. Schnzel. Here's something we all need,
and if the B. r. T. give it 10 u.s. let's have it,
even though crticise them in other respects