davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-02-14
ANIMALS THAT "PLAY PosstN.

"Riaying possum" Is a trick so we'll
known that the words describing Il
have a place in language. Many Of
these litrle animals have saved their
lives by reigning death whem attack *
ed.
A similar trick is noticed on the
part of small South African fox
when OverraRen or caught in IL trap:
1t collapses and appears to be dead.
One may lush 1t vigorously with a
whip without causing the wink o1 an
eyelid.
As soon as the enemy Is a little
distance away however, the sham.
ming animal will slyly open one eye to
inspect the outlook. II he thinks he
is safe, he gets up cautiously and
makes off.
The hedgehog- the porcupine, the
Australian eciiidnas and some of the
arrnadillos refuse to fight when at-
tackled. but most Of them are protect
ed by some kind of natural armor.
Perhaps the most common example
Of passive resistance is given by the
tortoise family. The land terrapiu,
for example. will calmly draw in its
legs and head and defy its foes by
locking them out.
A curious method of resisting attack
Is practiced by a certain member of
the starflsh family. When removed
from the water this fish will throw
off its legs and also its stomach. 1t
seems determined that no whole spec
linen shall ever be shown In a bottle
on a museum siteM
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-02-14

pertinent at this time, when greed
and grating dominate many leading
men of the world:
No; Senator Depew's heart has not
ceased to beat; his eyelids have not
been shut down; his body is not rigid;
he is not yet to be sepultured.
But the man whom the nation has
known and needed and delighted to
honor is nevertheless dead-dead to
the power he once welded, dead to
fame, dead to further usefulness or
happiness.
Health, spirit and power are gone
out of him, as light is gone out of an
extinguished lamp.
All that remains is warning.
A people who long looked up to
Chauncey NJ. Depew with respect and
confidence, who merrily laughed with
him, and were thrilled by his learned
eloquence, cannot repress the pity
that springs from the heart at his
plight today.
But pity, though generous even to
tears, must not blind us to the vital
lesson of this broken life.
We must see in it that there are
more ways to suicide than the bullet,
the poison, the dagger or the rope
more certain ways to a more complete
death.
In this poor old man, blasted and
ruined at the eventide of his long,
bright day by his own greed, God AL
mighty himself is preaching to this
nation one of his most powerful SER
mons.
1t is a sermon that every young
man should hear and heed.
We may fool the preacher and the
priest; we may dodge the sheriff and
the judge; but we cannot get away
from the supreme law and its sure
penalties.
The Depew we have known and
loved and laughed with is dead-a
suicide. The sparkle has gone from
his eye, the sunny glow from his face;
the spring of his eloquence has dried
up, and the once bubbling jests have
frozen upon his cold lips.
The strength of a Samson is shora
from him. The giant has shrunk to q
pigmy. Only few days ago the
highest felt honor in his friendship.
and now the very meanest of us all
may laugh at him.
Yes; there is suicide more complete
than that of the dagger or the rope,
and it not only breaks a man in body,
but kills fame, power, honor, pride,
hope. peace.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-02-14
A SOLDIERS APPETITE.

An army surgeon relates the story
Of q soldier who hud been in the hos
pital and kept on low diet for quite
while. Naturally, he yearned for a
good. square meal-
One morning the doctor found him
so much better that 1t seemed his
longing appetite could be safely graf
flied.
Gould you eat a small chicken to-
day, my MANI" the surgeon inquired.
Indeed, could. SIR" eagerly re-
sponded the Intient.
"And what would you like to have
it stuffed witlt?'"
well, sir. replied the hungry SOL
dier, "t should like 1t stuffed with
another"
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-02-14
OPEN THE UPPER RIVER.

LET NO MAN STAND FOR con-
GRESS IN THE EASTERN OREGON
DISTRICT WHO WILL NOT
PLEDGE HIMSELF IN ADVANCE
TO THE PEOPLE TO WORK WITH
OUT CEASING DURING HIS TERM
FOR THE OPENING OF THE up
PER COLUMBIA RIVER, THE CON-
STRUCTION OF THE SHIP CANAL,
AND THE RECOGNITION OF THE
NEEDS OF THE EASTERN ORE
CON COUNTIES IN EVERY WAY.
II the upper river is opened and
Kept open, and first-class transporta-
ton facilities are afforded the people
or the inland empire, there need be
no fear of the Columbia river bar and
the lower Columbia river channel.
II the agricultural and range pro-
ducts can be shipped to Portland at
a reasonable cost, PORTLAND WILL
FIND A MARKET FOR THEM.
! LET US MAKE AN OPEN CHAN
MEL TO THE FARM FIRST, AND
TO THE SEA AFTERWARD.
The very reason that Portland is
compelled to make the fight of her
life for the Alaskan trade today is not
because of the Columbia river bar,
not because Of the shallow water and
sand bars in the lower river-but it
is because there is no open river to
the farms and ranges tributary to
Portland.
There is a monopoly Of transporta-
ton between Portland and her sources
of supply and Seattle, Tacoma or San
Francisco, with more competition in
transportation lines, are better pre-
pared to compete for this splendid
Alaskan trade, which rightfully be-
longs to Portland whose great river
highway offers her unrivalled facili.
ties IL she would utilize them fully.
LET US OPEN AND KEEP OPEN
THE UPPER RIVER AND THE IN
CREASED TRAFFIC WILL AUTO.
MATICALLY sCoUR OUT THE BAR
AND THE LOWER CHANNEL.
This should be the slogan of the
eastern Oregon counties during the
campaign. This should be the plat
form Of every congressional candidate
in the district this year.
THIS is FOR PORTLAND AS
WELL AS FOR EASTERN OREGON
1T MEANS PoRTLAND's ELEvA
TIoN TO THE SUPREME POSITION
OF THE COMMERCIAL QUEEN OF
THE PACIFIC COAST.
GIVE US AN OPEN RIVER TC
THE FARM, RANGE AND MINE
FIRST, AND THE MULTIPLIED
TONS OF FREIGHT FLOWING
THROUGH PORTLAND WILL
MAKE AN OPEN PASSAGE TO THI
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-02-14

ductor turned his train over to the
yardnaster and went home to bed. He
had just fallen asleep when the caller
pounded on the door and said the
train was short one car in the report.
The conductor insisted he had check
ed 1t into the train, and it must be
there. on going to the yard, however,
he had 20 admit it wasn't there.
The next morning the missing car
was discovered in the ditch a few
miles out of Gurdon. The train had
parted, the box car had jumped the
track and the next car, which was
the cahoose had caught up with the
train and automatically coupled
Arkansas Exchange.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-02-14
GOLDEN NUGGETS FROM THE
ARGONAUT.

An Indian owed a merchant, and
went in ONE day to pay his bill. After
doing so, he wanted q receipt. In vain
the merchant told him a receipt was
unnecessary. Me must have to show
me owe you nothing" said the In
dian; 'me go to heaven and the Lord
ask Injun If he pay debts. Injun says
yes. Lord ask Injun where is receipt.
What Injun do? Can't go all over
hell to look for you.''
r
A milkman in a country town was
brought before the local court to an
swer a charge OF aduiteratfon of milk.
You are charged" said the Judge.
with a most serious effense, of SELL
ing adulterated milk. Have you any
thing to say in answer To the charge ?"
We'll, your honor" replied the milk
man, "the night before 1t was raining
very hard and the only cause / can
give is the COW must have got wet
through"
A friend of Maurice Barrymore re-
lates an incident of his last meeting
with the brilliant actor, which occur
red only a short time before his fac
ulties began to fail. As tfey were
parting. the newspaper man asked the
other: where are you to be found
nowadays-at the Players ~ No re-
Piled Barrymore; I'm posted at the
Players, but you can always find me
at the Lambs. AS a matter OF TACT" he
added whimsically, I'm posted at the
Lambs too, but they temper the wind
there"
"a friend of mine" says ex-Presi-
dent Cleveland. twas once travelling
on foot through a section Of West
Virginia, well known for its excellent
fishing grounds when he chanced up
on an angler of the old school-a ven-
| erable old countryman whos as he
sat on the bank. looked as If time and
the world might pass away without
disturbing his content. Have you
fished long In this stream| pleasant
Iy asked my friend. 'Twenty-three
years. was the laconic response of
| the fisherman, who scarcely looked
up. Get many bites?'- was the next
question. Still gazing intently along
the rod he held, the old angler repli-
ed: Two years ago In this very spot
I had a fine bite"
A we'll known artist was once en-
gagged upon sacred picture. A very
handsome old model named Smith sat
for the head of st. Mark. Artist and
model became great friends. but when
the picture was finished. they lost
sight of one another. One day, how
ever. the artist, wandering about the
geological gardens, came upon his old
model, with a broom in his hand
looking very disconsolate. "Hullo
Smith," said he, "you don't look very
CHEEKY. What are you doing now?'
"well, I aint doin' much, sir, and
that's a fact. Tim engaged in these
ere gardens a-olsanin' hout the hele-
plants stables, a nice occupation for
one O. the IL apostles. aint 1t, sir ?"-
The Argonaut;.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-02-14

Pallid upon her bier my fcndest Q
hope lies dead, q
That which I most desired l Q
may never own, Q
Through fate and folly all my 9
dearest dreams are fled, Z
And dark and somber has the q
prospect grown, Z
But still the lust OF living fires 9
my breast, q
Still life holds much that's z
great and good and fine. Z
And the adventurous spirit. with Q
unrest q
Longs for the strife, and .
sings, Today is mine! Q
st. Louis Globe-Democrat, Q
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-02-14

A man with his heels run down
feeis IN In his brain.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-02-14

When In doubt take your wife
along.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-02-14
SLOW THROUGH THE DARK.

Slow moves the pageant Of a climb
ing race:
Their footsteps drag far, far below
the height,
And, unprevailing by their utmost
might.
Seem faltering downward from each
hard-won place.
No strange, swift-sprung exception
we; we trace
A devious way thro' dim, uncertain
light
Our hope, through the long vistaed
years. sight
OF that our Captains soul sees face
to face. ..
Who, faithless. faltering that the
road is steep,
Now raiseth up his drear insistent
cry?
Who stoppeth here to spend while
in sleep
Or curseth that the storm obscures
the sky?
Heed not the darkness round you,
dull and deep:
The clouds grow thickest when the
SUBMITS nigh.
Paul Lawrence Dunbar.
.t
When in doubt take your wife
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-02-14
YOUNG TREES.

young trHe from the nursery con-
sists OF two parts-the top andl the
root, says nursery publication. These
two parts are from separate sources,
and are frequently very unlike i'm mn
ture; but titay are grated together by
the nurserymen for better or worse
until death doth them part. There's
no such thing as divorce in the. or
chard, yeti there are occasional seri-
Gus incompatibilitles between stock
and seion.. Is 1t not an important mat
ter for the man who grows trees TO
know something about these strange
marriages. why they are sometimes
successful. why sometimes unsnecess-
full anIi, all that?
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-02-14
CAR LOST FROM MOVING TRAIN

Stories Of cars mysteriously disap-
pearing from a train of freight cars
between stations have been told, but
the public have supposed they were
stories. One Of our readers, rail-
way man, vouches for the truth OF
this one, which is an actual fact.
Not long ago a night freight pull
ed into Gurdon, Ark, and the con-
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-02-14

can be enjoyed WHEN driving in one
of Neagle's new style fancy traps,
spider phaetons, rrnabout wagons,
surveys, buckboardB or pony carts for
children's use. They have all the
leading handsome designs for city or
country use at mvierate prices. We
are proud of thein elegant stock this
season and are pleased to show them
to you.
We are headquarters for the Wi
mona Wagons. that have iron-clad
hubs. No checking OF breaking loose
OF boxes. Our stock of Hacks and
Wagons is tina largest in eastern Ore
gon. We sell Fairbanks Morse Gaso-
line Engines and Pumps. and Irrigat.
Ing Plants. All goods warranted. See
Neagle Bros.
the Blacksmiths
Get Prices Before Buyinr.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1906-02-14
THE DEATH OF DEPEW.

The following singing satire upon
the conduct OF modern great" men,
from the Seattle Star, is particularly
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-02-08
Back to the Old County Fair.

Mexico, Mo -Audrain county will
20 back to the old county fair idea,
In stead OF the street fair, which hes
had its day In this part Of the coun.
try, A public meeting was held and q
permanent organization, pledged to
give an annual county fair for Eve
years, was organized. Representa-
tives OF fair associations In the fol-
lowing cities will meet in Mexico Sat.
nrday to form a new county fair cir.
cult; Bowling Green, Columbia,
Centralia, MobeIly, Marshall, Mexico
and Higginsville. The dates Of the
various old time county fairs will
likely be set at the meeting Satur.
day. ,.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-02-08

State p rSitinu.
The G vpru"r asked trr this iuiOr-
maiiun l,ecstu.v there l. d WOMAN uh
thr Is, arb ~ Managers Ot "I.e of TIL
State INSTITUTIONS Ah,,-- Head bus
rance sister h,l = n Ia'silirn a
hat Institution
The ,sputIsm tJatuIe pre- vi r.
that no p'nsoh u kia hv ! "'h az
10 II ria.e 10 a nemh.r,i ha Bnnr,;
( Managers Lfu State in-ti'uIi !
shall b. e;igihl', Ia hold spnsitiOn /, |
la. i-s;i.u!i.u.
The q vernon Gsked the Attolne,
General Ia c,,hsi ru. thir statute aLC
give his opislon ns tn whether or o.
II would lie permiseitl. f1r the va
msn to retain her position at the in
stitution.
AIR hadley, in HE opiui N to ill.,
Governor, says that in his iudgmen'
rhe wnmsn can rptnin ! er position
without violating the statute.
He hollis that WHEN one partv To u
marriage contract Is dead or divaic
d that ~ kinship created by that
marriage ceases
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-02-08
WHY THE BARBER TALKS,
Keeps Posted on Current News of.the
Day and Is Competent
to Speak.

BARRIERS have to know something
besides shaving and hair cutting" sale
the boss Of a downtown shop. says the
New York Sun. They have to read
the newspapers. They must keep up
with the news Of the day. and especial
ly sporting events. | don't know why
it Is so, but majority of my custom
ers begin talking about the races and
baseball and other sports as soon as
they get in the chair.
You have heard about the garrulous
barber. Now the fact Is that a city
barber rarely opens his mouth If the
customer is reticent.
III the barber talks 1t is due to the
customer. and, as have said, most of
the customers In barber shop run to
sporting news. If they find that the
barber is not posted they will 60 else
where. There is no rule requiring a
barber to read the newspapers In the
shop, but he understands that he Is ex-
pected to know what is going on.
Il have one man here who has made
a study Of the war in the far east, and
I really think he would be valuable
aid to any board Of strategy Several
of his customers are In the Army build
ing, and no matter how many are
ahead Of them when they come in they
wait for that barber because they like
to hear his views"
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-02-08
Conductor Frank Leslie Suicides

Rich Hill Review
Conductor j. F Leslie, popularity
known In Rich Hill (his boyhood
home) shot himself at Kansas City.
The act was committed ut half past
IL o'cl mk noon, while his wife was
asle' p In an adjacent room at the
family home, 403 Askew Avenue
The vile was awakened by the report
OF the pistol and going to her hus
band found him dead The bullet
had penetrated the brain
Mr.. Leslie had been employed as q
passenger conductor by the Frisco
road for 20 years. For the last year
he had suffered from nervousness.
Recently he had appeared to be- de.
spondent and expressed wish to
die. He was thirty second degree
Mason, Besides IL widow he LIFT a
son. 13 years Oh, who is q pupil ct
the Scarritt school.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-02-08
CHEAP SWIMMING POOLS.
May Be Made in the Brook by Coun-
try Boys with Small
Labor.

The brook or running stream of nat.
ural outdoor water gives a variety of
chances for the man who wishes to
live his life Alright, says Country Life
In America. The brook can be con-
verted, without being diverted, into
swimming pool for boys by building
a dam at the point where the banks
do a little extra shelving and tend to
form a natural basin. The, bottom
should be spaded out and made more
OF reservoir In its capacity and
shape. The dam itself can be made by
a family of boys at the cost of the
lumber and nails involved. The en-
bankments are sodded. The sides of
the spillway are made of wooden posts
driven into the ground and boarded I'D.
This makes boxed-up affair, or rather
two boxes, one on each side of the
stream. These boxes are filed with
sand. rocks and sods to make a solid
cubic piece of resistance. The sodded
entertainments run across the valley or
depression Of the brook hollow to the
higher ground. BY means of q lever
a pole (playing into a wooden jawed
socket and weighted with a rock or
pieces OF iron)-the watergate can be
opened against a strong Roadway of
water The water flows over the top
OF the spillway when 1t is closed, and
by raising the gate the pond can be
emptied or reduced to the normal level
of the brook.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-02-08
QoLaxxS:
Order OF Publication.
STATE OF MISSOURI

STATE " MISSOURI
County of Bates.
In the Circuit Court, in vac tion. January LIST,
laura vsrnes. Plaintiff,
va.
John varnes, Defendant.
Now at this day comes the plaintiff herein by
her attorney. and dies her petition under oath,
alleging, among other things that defendant,
Missouri:
Whereupon 1t Ia ordered by the clerk In yscs-
ton, that the said defendant be notified BY pub
LEGATION that plaintiff has commenced suit
against him In this court, the object and gener-
al nature Of which 10 to obtain decree OF d.
vorce from the defendant herein on The ground
that the defendant has abs ented himself from
this plaintiff without reasonable cause for
more then one year before the fling Of this suit.
and that unless the said defendant, John Varnes
be and appear at this court at the next term
thereof to be begun and holden at the court
the first Monday In May, 1905, and on or before
the brst day Of said term, answer or plead to
the petition in said cause, the same will be
taken as confessed and judgment will be rem
dered accordingly
1t 10 further ordered that q copy hereof be
published, according to the law. in the BuTLn
county Of Bates, Missouri, for four weeks sue
cessively, Published st least once { week.
the last insertion to be at least thiYtv days
6eior the hrst day ofssid next May term, Of
IA. PATTERSON. Circuit Clerk.
true copy from the record
lsEAL.] Circuit Court OF Bates ounty, this
}. A. fATI ERSON, Circuit Clerk.
ls-At CHAs. n. BARxLEY, D C.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-02-08
tOKlOT lis RAss DRUM.
Iowa I'm Eas Strong Claim on the
Title Champion For
getter.

The man who lost the bass drum
has been found. says the Chicago Inter
Ocean.
Newspaper paragraphers have made
merry with the absent-minded man.
and he has been accused Of all sorts
Of deeds of omission and commission.
Therefore. some of the stories told at
his expense have been taken in q
Pickwickian sense. The tale that a
man said he was so absent-minded
that he at one time lost a bass drum
has always been considered a mere
joke.
Originally this story may have been
fable, but now II is true. A man has
actually lost bass drum. and slEthe
members Of an Iowa band will bear
witness to the fact.
II happened near Davenport, a few
Sundays ago. There was celebration
at Davenport and an up-country band
had arranged to take part in the fes-
tivities. The train stopped at the sta
ton Just a moment. and the members
Of the band piled into the smoker.
with their instruments and their re-
gala. =
Just as the train was moving away,
fat, red-nosed man grasped the rail
and swung aboard. Then he turned
pale and gasped.
Where's my drumf" he cried. as
his eyes bulged and his knees shook.
Il saw It on the depot PLATFORM"
said the trombone player.
suffering cornshucks! | forgot III"
When the band began business at DAY.
export. 1t labored under a handicap,
and the bass drummer was not popular
member of the aggregation.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-02-08
Frances "oreen Peril. .

Franco has q green peril" which,
however, 1t does not dread, but rather
courts. In round numbers, It is said,
2.s26O0e gallons Of absinthe are anual-
ly required to allay the thirst Of
Frenchmen, or, rather, French men
and French women, as the latter con-
sumo their full share, not only in the
cafes of Paris, but throughout France.
One result attributed to the absinths
habit is the increase in lunacy In
France. During the last 90 years the
number Of lunatics has increased from
10000 to $4,000, while the increase IN
crime during the same period has also
been great. ;.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-02-08
Searching Party
Finds ChiId's Body.

Muskogee, l. T. Feb. 5.-The body
OF Evelyn Woods, the 3 year. old
daughter OF Henry Woods, who wan.
dered away from home last week,
has been found in the woods about a
mile from her home.
The little girl became lost in the
snowstoI m and the woods, and she
was ir.z,n to death. The searching
party had built big fire within $50
feet OF here TIE body was found.
The heavy snow he'd driited over
and buried her. From the time the
child was lott until the body was
found more than a week elapsed.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-02-08
Wheeler Asked What
Hour Firing Began.
From the Plttsburg Leader.

From the Plttsburg Leader.
New Yuik The nurse who was at
General Joseph Wheslsr's bedside
until he died tells this story OF the
Last hours Of the old fighter:
Several days before he died the
general sat up In the he'd and said to
the nurse: when does the firing lie
gir?"
To humor him the nurse replied:
"The firing will begin at 8 O'Clock,
general"
General Wheeler leaned back In his
bed, apparently resting. At FIVE
minutes to 8 O'Clock he reached over
for his watch, noticed the time and
took from the table near his bed a
small hnnrh OF absorbent cotton.
Very delibpretl y General Wheeler
plugged both ears with the cotton.
Then he leaned ba, k 10 his bed again
aud went To sleep.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-02-08

b vhtus ed aethesiot Of . speclal sxeen.
Nor ise1e4 from ~ e1Ss o. he clerk d she
turnehle = ~ IebeparS isSm;. isoI 81 IA
se.ss. e - dirssd q iSvos q ~ y b ~
iE .s (. 81 - aglasst JoAa Z. -.
ssy e s; "a ssss, ~ ~. l;IEIs
sasez9 - lotA ~ 81 EsbzSas,y :. s.lss.
1ssesen e1shosrs d 1)ns oselpp1 Il ~ tor..
pubilc vendue 70 the bIEhe1f bjddsf ~ cess y
= hsud - - III sid ~ ono ~ q
lsti sAssas d is's sosssy. ~
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1906-02-08
Notice Of Final EettIsmeny.

,. noue: Y hetsby eilln 70 81 orsditoss "a
Freeman, dsesAesd hat I, W. =. Wsifm.
sdIinistster q said esfat.. intssd : nj:
ne Bates Comfy Probate Court, + ~
sSen.ty. stsle q 1issolri, . b kSld 9 B1iisf,
@ said day o. - sooa thsrsaftsf 9 I 90 ~
Ard furtAse noties givsa 3 III helrs "a dis-
Tributes thatI Will d 10
lisa day Of Dsssmbsr. mn.
apply q The said court Or = order Y 6istxfb-.
tlon q he smosnt folnd . bssubjssS 3 6i6s
c,1 onu ss e said anel sstsjsnes "a n =
~ xdSin Iiau