The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1906-09-14
TALES AND ENDS.
WRITTEN FOR THE MIDLAND JOURNAL.
BY ALLEN PAYNE.

A contractor is known by his good works The
real estate agent by his good deeds
Some women are so close mouthed they
wouldn't give man the last word
The hand that rocks the cradle seldom wears a
diamond.
There are folks who would like to be in mil
lionaires shoes even if there were nails in the
Bottom of them. If they had the money it would
be an easy matter to have the tax cut out
lullaby to a baby is worth dozen orchestras.
The worm may turn but it's not because an
other worm passes with prettier wrigge.
It's about as much trouble for a woman to sit
on the knees of a man who has his legs crossed as
if he were bow-legged.
Some folks have an idea fortune is smiling upon
them when it's only grin.
The closer you stick to your business the closer
your underwear will stick to you.
Woman was maid from the rib of man. No
wonder then that the old maid man haters DIS
like to be ticked in the Stats
Imagination may go long ways but it's short
route to an insane asylum.
The way for you to get on your feet again is by
the Bonded knee
The more trouble some women make for their
husbands the richer the saloon keepers become.
Women marry to suit themselves. And ac'
cording to an opponent of the husbands, tne
husband married the women to suit them.
Some men are lucky enough in this world not
to lose any thing but confidence.
Loafers endeavor to kill time with jack'knite.
Folks who show their ignorance create a circus
for others.
When folks who have lived in clover up 10
their necks, come down into grass pasture and eat
hay it's one straw that breaks the camei's back.
Marriage is only a lottery but the girl in love
with dentist may find it a draw.
There's honor among thieves. When ever one
spots a women they are not long in finding what's
honor.
Its more cursed to give than to receive.
Some people never see any bright side because
there is not sufficient sand in them to make
decent securing soap.
The average round steak you buy of the
4, butchers should be called the bone steak.
The man who seeks revenge often has the dogs
seeked upon him.
1t would be pretty hard for a crosseyed girl to
single out man.
Love never sees any faults but after marriage
it hears it.
Cupid is only a small potato but he has made
many pair of cabbage heads beet as one.
Even an incubator baby may eventually turn
out to be a bad egg.
When person knows the bible by heart they
bind it found with their heart strings
A pig with a coat of mud on his back is happier
than woman with Il $500 opera cape on her
shoulders.
man whose life is all sunshine seldom gets
hot.
An oily complexion is worthless to an old man
in imberng up.
Don't worry about your position in life You
will be as dead as door nail some day and you
won't know then whether you lived in poverty OF
riches.
When man is left windfall he goes to the
grog shop to have a new lining placed in his
stomach When girl gets windfall she departs
for the dress. makers to have new coat put OH
her back
When man cuts off his nose to spite his face
he wipes the affected parts on rag weed.
1t may be a blessing that some folks are tongue
tied if they were not it would likely be loose at
both ends.