davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
strange Happenings at Guthrie.

Like Minerva, the blue-eyed goddess,
who sprang full-panoplied from the brain
Of Jove, Oklahoma soon will bound into
the slsterhood of States complete. round
ed, polished. and prepared TO perform her
functions in working out the destiny Of
the republic. We gather this from the
all too abbreviated reports that are I'll
tered to the hurrylng and needless East
from that busy hive of constitution-mak
ers now buzzing at Guthrie. 1t is of more
or less COntempOraneous interest to note
In passing that of the 112 Lycurguses
chosen by the electorate Of the twin Ter
ritories to lay the foundation of the State
deep and eternal, nnety-eight Of them
are Democrats. showing that ingratltude
has boundless opportunities to vaunt itself
under free institutions. Now Mr.. Flynn
has come TO Washington to explain that
when the really important elections are
held In The new State the Republicans will
triumph
But that the constitution, when formed,
viii be a model We have no doubt. II
We had misgivings upon this point they
would be dspelled by reports of incidents
from Guthrie. For example: Delegate
Haskell wants the portraits OF Bryan and
Jefferson to grace the walls Of the con-
yenJion hall along with that of President
Roosevelt. He offered his idea in a reso-
luton, in which he spoke Of Jefferson as
the father Of good government and OF
Bryan as the savior of honest princi-
pies The sergeant-at-arms was instruct
ed to get the pictures" The resolution.
it appears, provoked no debate. Elo-
quence there was I'm plenty on tap. we
are certain. but not even an exordium
exuded. The chairman ordered that the
pictures be obtained, brought forth, and
hung alongside of that Of President
Roosevelt. whose noble counterfeit pre-
sentiment seems 10 have decorated the
hall from the opening of the convention.
Not d shout or crackle Of handcleps or
stamp Of feet greeted the adoption OF the
resolution or the bringing in OF the pic
tures of the father Of good government
and the savior Of honest principles. It
was an occasion for OratOry. but none was
turned loose. The fourteen Republican
delegates may have grinned derisiveIy.
and doubtless did, but no mention Is
made of the fact in the press reports.
If a new State is 10 be brought into the
Union without the accompaniment OF
roaring and sizzling verbal pyrotechnics,
where are we 10 look for those enthusing
features OF notwithstanding? II the
pictures Of Theodore Roosevelt, Thomas
Jefferson, and William Jennings Bryan
can be Haunted before an audience in
Oklahoma without arousing the specta-
tors 10 shouts and huzzas, what is the
use TO attempt further to bolster up free
government with constitutions? The con-
vention at Guthrie must be composed OF
Indians, who are silent, saturnine, and too
seTiOus-minded for the work
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
LITTLE HENRY ON THANKSGIVING

Thanksgiviu' IS the time when turkeys
go up 10 30 cents pound and everybody
begins 20 think that before long thay will
haft TO go broke buyin Christmas pres
ents
Thare are lots OF people in the world
that IS 20 poor TO be able 20 let the mar
ketman skin them out OF 30 cents a pound
for turkeys. & so they otto be vary thank
ful
ThanksEivin' started away long aEo
when thare wasent but a few people in
this country, and thay lived away down
East ana thaTe wasent any raIerodes so
thay couldn't go home for Thanksgivin'
dinner, so thay concluded 90 have thare
Own Thanksgivin'.
Thay was coionists and thay colonisted
on Plimmuth Rock, wich is on the edge Of
the ocean and costs you % cents TO see
unless your ancestors come over on the
Mayflower- The Mayfower was a boat
that come from England once with a lot
of people In it and a lot Of clocks and
spinnin wheels and things. Unkel BIZ sez
thare must have been a whole feet Of
Mayfiowers, becOs he has seen enough
clocks alone 10 hII ships hisself, II your
ancestors come over In the Mayfower
your ma has got the right to sniff at
somebody else that only got into this
country by waitin til thay could come
over in seven days and play poker all the
way.
Thare IS also the dotters Of the revolu-
ton and some more dOtters OF the revo-
luton and thay have conventions every
year and thare pictures is in the papers.
q thay almost have fites with eech other
elect!a' presidents and things. EnkeI
Bill sez thay are like a SEWN society ac-
Co-diH TO HOWE
but the people that got Up Thanksgivin'
was here before the revolution. and thay
dident have enough to eat all one year.
Thay rote home for munney, but dident
set any and so thay had 70 go TO work
and rase crops and animals to eat.
Unkel BIZ sez thay was so poor for a
while that evry family had from ten to
forty dogs
The igrotes wich live ia the Philipeen
Hands eat dogs tbay have so many, also
people huntin' the north pole eet dogs.
Unkel Bill sez he don't Sc why thay can't
find the north pole II thay will only take
a lot Of saint bUTnard dogs along instead
of poOdles. In the north pole the mites is
Is months long & when people go out to
spend the evenin' they hat to pack thare
trunks for a long visit.
We should all be vary thankful that we
don't live in the Philipeen Hands or hunt
the north pole. in the Philipeen Hands is
the revolution OF the natives & in the
north pole is the revolution Of the erth on
its axes. but thay don't have dotters of
tho revolution anywhere but rite here.
Turkeys Is good eetin & so is mints pie
& so IS plum pudding q so is cranberry
sOsS.
so think we can all be thankful or at
leest much obliged.
WILBUR NEsBlT.
Uopyrirht 1906 by W D. Neshit)
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

In the ideal cotton country Of our South
eTn States.
Following that interesting information
came recently from the Bureau of Man
ufactures Of the Department of Com
merce and Labor this bulletin:
Consul William H. Bradley Of Manchester. for
wards newspaper clipping detailing the object Of
the second English committee sent out 10 observe
American cotton growers and packers but princi
pay to select sites for large experiments Ia grow
ing cotton. The article reads: AS a result Of the
observations made in the American cotton fields IN
the spring By a commission Of sDinners sent out BY
a number of the leading cotton firms Of Ian
cashire. a second commission invested with
larger powers has sailed from Liverpool 10 visit the
Southern cotton fields. The first party gathered
valuable statistics 20 the methods and cost OF
growing, balins, and transporting cotton. and the
second commission will gain further information
and experience Of the actual process Of cotton pick
ing. Beyond this. the commission Of three-Messrs.
II. W MacAlister. W. J. On. and A. Niven Whyte
arc authorized purchase suitable areas Of land
behalf Of certain Lancashire firms 20 make DrAo-
tical experiments in growing their own cotton.
adam walked" says the Richmond
Dispatch. Perhaps he preferred it
to strap hanging.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
Man Chased by a spider.

From the London Standard.
A story is told by an explorer of a
large and fierce South American spider
which chases men if they come too near
its lurking places. On one occasion he
was pursued by one
Riding at an easy trot over the dry
grass" he writes. L observed a spider
pursuing me, leaping swiftly along and
keeping up with my beast
L aimed a blow with my whip and
the point of the lash struck the ground
close to It, when il instantly leaped
upon and ran up the lash. and was ac-
italy within three or four inches OF my
hand when I flung the whip from me-"
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
To Give Veterans a Chance.

FTcm the Charleston News and Courier.
Resolutions were adopted last week at
the convention Of the United Daughters
of the COnfederacy in GulfpoTt, Mss, to
dispense with sponsor and maids OF
honor at reunions of the United Confed-
crate Veterans. The resolutions were
offered by Mrs. Darlington Mason, pTesi-
dent OF the Sarah Lane Chapter Of
Memphis, who explained that her pur-
pose was 10 obtain more consideration
for the veterans. the reunions that have
been held, in her opinion having been
converted into entertainments for spOn-
S0rs and maids Of honor rather than for
the old soldiers. She explained further
that the large sum raised by the cities
in which the reunions have been held
had been expended for the accommoda-
tion of the sponsors and maids at the
best hotels. while the veterans were
lodged in vacant houses and were re-
Quired to sleep on cots.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
EXPERIENCE.

No. little one. tread not the glowing Path.
All, listen. dear
The way is not as lovely as you dream,
Tho flowers are not perfect as they seem.
But faded. scentless In Pains aftermath
(She does not hearl
No. taste it not. the trees gift. rosy red,
] tasted 50.
And ate the fragrant mOrsei, bent on bliss
But hUngered on; for joys enhancing kiss
Showed fairer fruit on boBghs above my head
Yes. child, / know
All! follow not to music far away,
II is not sweet:
But, rather, hear faint melodies at hand
(Alas, she goes. she does not understand
That so the sirens sang their mystic lay.
Too swift her feet
But foolish me-to think to teach the Spring
OF AutuHsn's woe!
Go. little soul, as ever Youth must 20
Through sun and shade Of Life to learn to know
That only Summer can fruition bring;
God made growth So
Edith Livingston Smith in the Outlook
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
THE INNOCENT BYSTANDER.
TIE SNOW.


The fields that yesterday were sere and
brown,
That spread in barren, drear unlovel!-
ness,
Now wear the sheer, white robe that fiut-
tered down
With such a softness no tongue may
express
The trees that tossed their naked arms
on high
Now with a wondrous mantle have been
GTaped
As though from pUrest. cleaning ivory
They had by cunning hands been deftly
shaped
All, al is hidden, sprawling limb and
bOuRh
And bleak, unlovely hill and valley
low
In white perfection all the world lies now
Beneath the gentle garment Of the
snow.
= 4.
SO we. sometimes, when we stand gaunt
and grim
With all our faults made oyerplain and
bold,
Are whitened through some caprice or
some whim
OF charity. whose cloak IS white-and
cold
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
IIrr1.E GIRIfs LAMENT.

They say that sleeping dogs mag lie;
But little girls may not,
For when tell the littlest fb
They scold an awful lot
Sometimes I wish 7 was dog
Sos I could lie a lot;
For when I've taken mothers cake
I'd rather sleep than not.
Then when she'd say. Nov Clementine.
Did you do 80 and sou
I'd close ny eyes and snooze bit
And growI out, No; oh, no."
-LiPpincott's Magazine.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
How She Was Impressed.

You seemed greatly impressed" said
the minister, with my description of how
they brought the head of John the Baptist
before the king on a salver."
Yes" sighed Mrs De Style. i was
thinking how much better they trained
servants in those days. Now, mine, when
they bring me things, are forever forget
ting the salver."
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
News to Him.

From the Catholic Standard and Times.
'The beauty OF this great and glorious
republic" said the American proudly,
''is that any boy born here may become
President"
"Fawncy!' exclaimed the British tour
ist. 7 was under the impression that the
President had 70 be at least forty years
Of age"
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

dlvidual who wields a tennis raquet like
a baseball bat Is a pretty far cry. how
ever, and we shall not complain II the
girl with her bonnet strings tied under
her blessed little chin plays an early re-
turn date. She was mighty lax a rose"
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
Involved.
From the Cleveland Leader.

From the Cleveland Leader
Don't you love me?"
''Yes, dear, but I'm already engaged
Break your engagement"
"Oh. George that wouldn't be honor
able. An engagement is a sacred thing,
and not lightly to be entered into or
broken of. Besides
''Wen?''
"Well. I'm engaged TO two men, and
that makes It even worse"
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

From Lippncott's
During a conversation between the
present German Kaiser and his chan
Cellor the latter, in closing a remark.
said:
"As the immortal William once put
it. There's a di Unity that shapes our
ends rough hew them how we will -
That's pretty good" spoke up the
Kaiser. But by the way. when did
say that?"
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

John Hemstreet, of Chicago, who died
recently at the age Of 101 years. was an
inveterate smoker for eighty-seven years
of HIS life; and now a nicotine consumer
asks why so few of the anti-tobacco
crowd ever seem to get by the three
scoTe-and-ten mile post?
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
A LITTLE NONSENSE.
He Has Nothing.

Rain coat. overcoat. dress coat! Ny,
you have lots of clothes.
Yes; I've just been married. A newly
married man has everything"
Quite the opposite, eh. Of the old mar
rled man?"
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
4 Hint to senator NIorgan.

From the Richmond Times-Dispateh.
Senator Morgan proposes that the Dem
ocratc national convention insert 4
plank in the platform declaring that the
Democratic party of the United States
is and has always been a white mans
party " He would prefer that the decla-
ration come from a Northern delegation.
Perhaps the California delegation viii
not be averse to Offering it.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
Secretnrr Root,s Messnre-

From the New York Mail.
pass the shipping bilP' is the word
brought back by Elihu Root from his
tour of the Southern continent.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
English.

Just fancy" says he,
Just fancy, tee hee;
just fancy my stealing a kiss.
Just fancy" she croOns.
Oh, prisms and prunes!
Just fancy such talk as this.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

It Is said that Patrick's petition to Gov.
Higgins for executive clemency was
signed by $40 doctors. Any man who
can succeed in getting that many doctors
to agree deserves executive clemency, and
pretty much anything else he wants.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
The PIeasnres of Home.

From The Philadelphia Inquirer
Upton hopes TO win the Americas cup
in 190S the year in which Bryan hopes
TO be elected president.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

One Chicago mass meeting resolved that
President Roosevelt has no regard for
law, and another resolved that Senator
TiIlman has no regard for order. Here is
a chance TO form a disorder,y conduct
syndicate.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

It hardly seems worth while for Senator
Depew TO bother about putting his stock
of funny stories in his memoirs. Nobody
has succeeded in forgetting them fer the
past seventeen or twenty thousand years
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
Thinking of shop.

'TH be as steadfast as steel" murmured
the beautiful girl
Common or preferred?" inquired the
young broker, absently.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
Annie.

God has given you health. wealth.
honors, happiness"
''Well2'
DO you make the proper returns?'
Sure. Amt I a pronounced optimist?"
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

Texas, captured. tried. and executed q
man within the space Of two hours re-
Gently; and now comes an Indiana man
who met, woOed, and married a girl in
one hour. The idea Of a quick finish
seems TO be gaining in popularity.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

The grace of the Lord sends A good
wife to every man. says Sir Thomas Lip
ton. Still, all things considered. it looks
like nothing short of amazing grace will
ever land Sir Thomas.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

The people would Ike TO see currency
elastic enough to stretch well past De
cember %
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
Thanksgiving Verse.

Now the poet wakes sunny bout the
pumpkin in the shock, and thus earns
sufficient money 10 remove his coat from
hook
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

Georgia's latest 10-cent magazine, ''The
MOcking Bird" is out proudly flying the
colors of Mr.. Percy Wiggle, as editor
and manager. Long may it wiggle; also,
sing and wave.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

And now some Of the Apaches also
want to go on the warpath. There is be
ginning 10 be serious doubts about the
supply Of warpaths being equal to the
demand.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

Of course, eminent persons may theorize
about matrimony. but the little winged
god knows full well that when a couple
has that want-to-g o-get-married feeling, II
is a condition. and not a theory, that
cOnfrOnts them.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

Colorado women fought. fused. anG
fumed until they got wOman's suffrage,
and then, just as soon as they got it, de-
cided they didn't want H. Isn't that just
like a woman
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

A Mississippi contemporary says: THE
editor Of this paper would rather vote
for John Sharp Williams than any living
man" This, at least. sharply dIfferen-
tiates Mr. Williams from the dead ones.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

The Dallas News prints a column of
English jokes right alongside of a lot of
Supreme Court decisions. Fortunately,
each column has the proper explanatory
headline
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

The almanac alone told the truth about
the weather for the past few weeks Here
after We propose to depend on the alma
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

II that BayOnne man who found pearl
in a pigs head failed to make some
remark about casting pearls before
swine" he certainly is in the lonesome
class.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

The Car has just handed down a ukase
promising aid TO the peasants. Handing
them a sort Of lemonade, so 10 speak.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
Unlimited sunrage.

From the Chicago News
No registration for Thanksgiving is
necessary
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

Not unexpectedly. the Count de Castel-
lane regards the suggestion that he now
go to work for a living as adding insult
20 injury.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

A New York boy. aged twenty. formed
two trusts and cleared $4,000 in less than
six months, There is a great future for
this lad In the pleasant fields of frenzied
finance
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

There are fourteen editors in the new
Missouri legislature. Fourteen editors
ought to be able TO show Missouri any
thing
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

King Edward VI is said to have spent
less than $1,000 per year. However, II is
a long time between Edwards in Eng
land.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

A discordant note-that "tenner" OF the
tenor s.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

Senator Benjamin Ryan Tiliman refuses
to be sat upon, or even glaTed at
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

slated 10 succeed Platt and Depew The
frying pan again.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

Credit should be- given those Demo-
Gratis who aided US 10 elect Gov. Hughes"
remarked Representative John Dwight. OF
the New York delegation. at the Shore
ham. Had it not been for thousands OF
conservative men I'm that party Mr.. Hearst
would have been elected. A candidate
who ought to have been beaten by 900.
is defeated by less than 70,001 votes, ow-
ing 20 combination of money and news
paper influence. But TO have beaten him
at all. is matter Of such great c0ngratU-
latiOn that we will have 10 COndOne the
smallness Of the margin Of victory"
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

Hon. Jesse Overstreet. Of Indiana, WAS
being congratulated 10y friends, IN tEe
New Willard lobby, last evening over the
fact that he got the biggest plurality
Of any Of the Hoosier delegation, ard
the largest ne ever received in an of
year. Mir. Overstreet is. naturally, IN
gracious hUmoT over the very emphatic
Endorsement given him by one OF the
greatest constituencies in the union.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27

Capt Seth Bullock, the noted West
erner. now United States marshal fcr
South Dakota, is at the ShOTeham- In
the old days Of frontier lawiessuess he
was a terror 10 evil-doers. and many a
criminal has he put behind prison bars.
Capt Bullock came on with an insane
patient 70 be placed in St Elizabeth.
The Washington herald., 1906-11-27
He Recognized 1t.

Copyright, 1906. by ". D. Nesbi
The Paducah evening sun. [volume] (Paducah, Ky.) 1906-1929, 1906-12-12
High Price for a Cent.

A specimen of the first cent struck
in the United States mint in 1898,
with thirteen links in a circle on the
reverse, was sold foI $50 yesterday
at the end of two days sale of coins
held at the Hotel Bartholdl by Geof-
frey c. Adams. Daniel r. Kennedy
auctioned them off.
Some of the prices exceeded any
ever paid before. Two half cents,
struck din 1886 and 1852. brought
s42.5O and s35 respectively. or the
cents struck in 1749 fifty-six varie-
ties were disposed Of, two minor va
rieties bringing $50 each. A flying
eagle cent of 1856 brought $12. Sis
pattern trade dollars issued in 1873
brought $24. Much interest was
shown by those present in the tokens
that at one time passed for money In
this country. One showing the head
of Andrew jackson on one side and
the inscription. "The Bank Must Per.
ish." on the other, which passed for I
cent during President Jackson's ad'
The Paducah evening sun. [volume] (Paducah, Ky.) 1906-1929, 1906-12-12
4 $4,000 Toothpick.

Charles NJ. Sohwab was in rem
inlscent mood the other night while
conversing with several friends in the
corridor of the Waldorf-Astor,a. He
pulled toothpick from the pocket of
his waistcoat and after CHANGING at
It thoughtfu.ly, Said DO YOU know
that | never look at a toothpick
without recalling the time when an
acquaintance OF mine made a large
sum OF money-s30 .0O0-and IT was
all due to a common little hotel tooth
pick. II was over three years ago
when my friend was dining at his ho-
tel, and after he had left the restau-
rant he directed his steps toward
Broadway. He had walked scarcely
a block when his tooth began to
ache. A particle OF food had wedged
firmly between two Of his teeth, and
finding that he was without a tooth
pick he started back to the hotel to
get one. When leaving the hotel the
second time he overheard John w.
Gates remark to friend that he felt
positive Steel common would be SELF
ing at 10 before the end of the sum-
mer. Now. my friend was not well
posted on the steel market. but know
ing that Il was Gates who made the
remark and also the great weight his
word carried in such matters, he de-
cided to take advantage of the tip
and 1t did not take him long to place
his order with a broker to sell 1000
shares of steel at ~. Well every
body knows what steel did in the
summer of 1904, going down below
8, but my friend ordered his trade
to be closed around 10, and he clean
ed up a profit of $4,000, which he
never would have made had it not
been for the little toothplek. New
York Letter.