Los Angeles herald., 1906-01-07

NIOW, Mrs. Simcox, leave it all tC
" me. L intend to take the sum.
mer business in hand this yeal
and see what can make of it. Hereto
fore you have bossed the job, and what
have you accomplished? Have you sue
ceeded in marrying off any of the
girls?
Now, don't say, ooh, father!" foi
what else do you hope for year after
year when you spend all that money or
their clothes and take them to a fash
ionable hotel at the seaside? What
does any mother take her daughters TO
the seaside for?
Do you deny that you want to marry
off the girls? If you pretend TO outsld-
erS that you want to keep them all
three at home for the rest of their
lives because you couldn't possibly give
them up you don't fool me, and | am
just plain enough to confess that [
wouldn't mind seeing n son-in-law in
the FAMILY merely to vary the monotony
of so many petticoats. When the girls
We're little people told me I'd have to
keep dog to keep the men away after
they were grown. Well. Mrs SimcoX. T
haven't felt the necessity, though
they're pretty we'll grown. But some
thing must be done this summer. I'm
a plain business man, and this thing
has got to be conducted on business
principles. When case of goods doesn't
prove good seller in our line of bust
ness we mark it down and offer it for
what 1t will bring. We must do the
same with the girls. If they are unmar-
No. L am not an unfeeling creature
at all. I'm plain, sensible father try
ing to do his best for his children
Don't tell me the girls themselves
wouldn't like husbands. I never saw
girls work so hard
Well, what do you call it then? Play
ing tennis until they're purple in the
race because some dude is on the Other
side of a net and going to church three
times Sunday because the minister
is unmarried? Maybe that doesn't
seem like work to you but if I had to|
labor that way year after year I'd go
on strike for shorter hours and better
resultsi
The trouble with you. Mrs. Simcox
is that you carry too much sentiment
into this matter, Marrying off ones
daughters is no time for sentiment. If
the sentiment don't come on the other
side you've got to conduct it without
It. Now, shall get down to cold. hard
buslness-employ a system. so to speak
and II we don't return with at least
one son-in-law to the good by the first
OF september I'll own myself a failure
as a business man and in future will
spend our summers in town. You are
100 fond of speaking of the girls ac-
complishments and Of telling the young
men, When you can get their ear, that
tney are jewels and you couldn't pos
hibly part with one of them. That's not
the way TO make a man propose. He's
foolish enough to believe it and TO leave
you your jewel unclaimed. I mean 10 |
take an entirely different tack. | shall
say nothing about Angelica's needle !
Work-the truth is, see very little OF
II when my buttons come off or the |
household linens need mending-nor of
Rosamond's china painting don't
pretend to be Judge of art, but the |
china pieces you pick Up at the bar. |
gain counter look quite as artistic ia
me and the flowers on 'em are a heap
more natural. AS for Catherine don't |
mean TO spell her name with a X nor
mention the prizes she won at ming
pong. If the young men are on the
lookout for GATHERINGS spelt with q X |
and ping pong prizes to set up house, |
keeping with, let them find out for
themselves that the girl has EN-. /
NO, ma'am, its merely plain speak !
ing and what you'll have to get accus- !
toned to i'm the futulc! What have
your flowers Of speech accomplished in
the ten years you've been carting the
girls all over the country TO seaside
resorts.
Well, If you don't like TO cali II ten
call 1t anything you please! But have
Inc receipts for ten separate summers, |
thats all ! know. / have been figuring |
up those receipts and figures. as YOU |
know, don't lie. / find that the cost of
each separate outfit, including board |