Greene County herald. (Leakesville, Miss.) 1898-current, 1906-04-13


She-Yes; I've frequently noticed it
in crowded street car.-Philadelphia
Record.
Yeast-Did he fail to make success
of business? Crimsonbeak-Yes 1 be-
lieve that is why he failed.-Yonkers
Statesman.
First Director-I wish they'd inyes-
tigate this company. Second Director
Why? First Director-Id like to find
out something about it.-Puck.
What" asked Miss Elderleigh, "did
papa say when you asked him for me:'
He didn't say anything. He fell on
my neck and Chicago Record
Herald.
Pa Twaddles-Tommy, l wasn't such
big fool when / was your age. Tommy
Twaddles-But you've growed big
lot since then, amt you, pa?-Cleye-
land Leader.
mo man, said the fellow who
| quotes, "can serve two masters" "And
yet" answered the observer, 1--WE have
men who commit bigamy."'-St. Louis
Post-Dispatch.
"You say that public official had
nothing to say?" said the editor Eyes"
answered the self-confident reporter.
But he talked three-quarters of an
hour before | discovered It."
Waiter-How did you order your
beef, sir? Gruffleigh-Personally, con-
found you! l suppose ought to have
ordered it by mail two weeks in adj
vance.-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Can you advance any argument to
show why your political principles
should VIM" NO." answered Mr..
Dustin Stax, ''but / can advance con-
siderable cash. Washington Star.
Now, George, I'm off to the station
for mother. Do brace up and don't act
as if you had NAL de mer!" mo such
luck; it's the coming NAL de votre
mere that makes me sick" -BrooklynI
Life.
your bump Of destruction is unus-
ually large" said the professor of
phrenology. "Are you prize-fghter? 2"
mo" replied the victim in the chair.
II am furniture over."-Chicago
News.
"Pop!" Eyes, my son." "What is an
excavation why, an excavation,
my boy, is place from which dirt
has been taken" well, l suppose
my face is an excavation, n?''-Yon-
kers Statesman.
What do you mean by writing
Among the prettiest girls at the dance
was Capt. Andrews?' The captain is a
man. Yes, but he spent most of
his time among the prettiest girls
there. Philadelphia Telegraph
They are asking how you got your
money" said the friend. That's all
right" answered Senator Sorghum. "It
will be time enough to worry when
they begin to figure on how to get it
away from me. Washington Star.
Woody declares his grandfather
descended from one of the greatest.
houses in England" "Ah, yes; did
hear a story about the old man falling
off roof he was repairing once for
Lord Somebody or other. "-Philadel-
phia Ledger.
Parke-There's only one way to man
age about money matters. Whenever
| see a thing I want l invariably ask
myself this question, Can / afford it?"
Lane-But do you always stick to this?
Parke-Always. If l find | can't afford
it, buy it-Town and Country
Miss Pechis-I was quite surprised
at Mr.. Sloman last evening He was
discussing American Beauties" and he
paid me quite a compliment. Miss
Chellus-Well, that was surprising. l
never before heard of his paying any
thing before it was due.-Philadel-
phia Press.
1.-THE last time l saw Packer he was
looking pretty blue; said he had moth
ing to do" HE told me the same
thing today when | met him, but he
was quite cheerful1 "Ah, resigned to
it, l suppose" Resigned to it? No,
just appointed to it. He's got poll
teal ob."-Philadelphia Press.
Pa" said little Willie, what is the
difference between a magnet and a
magnate?" "A magnet, Willie, is me-
tallic substance. generally Of iron,
which will attrack certain metals. but
not gold or silver. A magnate is a. me-
tallic substance, invariably of brass,
which will attract gold and silver on
ly."-Judge.