Waterbury evening Democrat., 1906-03-29
BY MARGARET F. sANGsTER.

BY MARGARET F. sANGsTER
 An old Spanish proverb runs to the effect that it takes two to make a quarrel; one can always end 1t. This
 is equivalent to saying that one of two who are contending will have sufa- cient self-restraint and kindness of heart to forego the privilege of the last word. In the family as nowhere else on earth, wills and temperaments are in danger of clashing. and people being sure of mutual affection, ex- press their minds with candor that may wound the sensitive and leave uncomfortable memories. have known families who were never happy when separated, though they were al. ways wretched when together. Incom- patibility of disposition may work dis aster to domestic peace, when every body concerned is high-minded and honorable. A good man may have a knack of putting his foot clumsily where it behooves him to tread deli cately, and good woman may have . trick of flying of the handle on slight occasion. When such opposite forces exist in a home. there is great need to remember the pith of the old proverb, It takes two to make guar. rel.
 The wisest of men declared that a soft answer turneth away wrath. As a rule this is verity. But there are exceptions. In certain moods, soft answer is an irritant, an aggravation of the previous offense, and its effect is that of a firebrand upon dry stub ble.
 While men and women continue what they are. human and imperfect, there will never be unbroken serenity and entire agreement in any home un- der the sun. An old gentleman once boasted that he had lived with his wife 50 years, and they had never had diff. ference of opinion.
 "vera praiseworthy." commented a plain.spoken Scottish friend, ''but very monotonous." Another man com placently asserted that he had dwelt in harmony with his better half for a great many years. "If she prefers red and I prefer blue," he explained, i've always settle the matter by com promising on the blue" An obviously easy method this was, if a wife were ready to sacrifice her own desire and efface her own individuality. A long course of it would spoil the most req sonable of husbands and make him terribly self-opinionated, or were the pendulum to swing the other way, and fls wife forever have -tase .finai dsci- sion, 1t would turn ths sweetest of women into a tyrant of the hearth.
 Fairness compels the conclusion that two or more grown persons sheltered under the same roof, cannot invariably think alike.
 Nor would it be desirable that they should. A stagnant pool Is a menace to health. Running water. foaming over the rocks, is a pledge of whole some life in the locality. A stirless day, when no breeze blows, is less stim- ulating than . day when the winds hold a jubilee. Movement. progression. even friction of the right kind. tend to development of the finest type.
 But people may differ without bick- ering and fighting. They may ex- press themselves strongly without in- fiicting pain. They may continue to think differently. And yet live in tran quillity. if they choose.
 "It takes two to make . quarrel;
 One can always end 1t"
 You might accept my politics" ex- postulated husband, who was an old fashioned democrat, to his wife. who was a radical republican.
 q accepted you. dear" she replied. but my political sentiments are an inheritance from my father. and I cannot change them any more than 1 can change the color of my eyes."
 Thank Heaven" he murmured. "that you haven't c vote"
 Some of us who have no enthusiasm on the subject of universal suffrage. are of the honest mans opinion. And yet, if ever American women in an insistent majority. should demand suf. frage. American men will have too much gsllantry to deny them. and none of us anticipate that any fright ful domestic calamities will ensue from that cause.
 Common sense and mutual good feel Ing. with due regard for the effect of quarrels upon the children will usual. ly prevent distressing squabbles In the home. Hottempered people are prone to say more than they mean. Tact less folk rush into mistakes. But love Is a solvent that prevails to blend the most diverse clements. and to con riliste the most obstinate
 Speaking of ohstinscy, thousands of p>ople confuse t with frmness They fancy if they cannot he moved from : position. either by argument CT per. sussion. that they are showing ter- acfty of purpose and strength of vsll 10 an extent that lifts then, sboys heir fellows Often instead Of firm ness. these people are simply display Ing the temper Of bziky horse. or ths absurd stesdfsstnsss of . naie that refuses to stir step We nsv s~ oh .sinste in boIdIns fast to a prsiuaice. pr obstinate beoagss of exer-rssains ,sifeoncsit An ability to see another ,ersoa's ssae Of the shield to lesk ., lrairs fron . viewpoint tk.t is not