Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1906-03-02

President Roosevelt threw his head
back and sent forth steutorian roar
that dominated 200 other laughs hardly
less in size. lie did it not once. but
many times. 1t was at the recent din
ner Of the Gridilon ctun: 1T the New
Willard hotel in W ashinglon, and the
cause of the presidents mirth was the
fact that he and his administration
and, above all, the Panama canal de-
partment of it We're roasted to the
queens taste. says Washington spe-
cial dispatch to the New York Times
Next in size was the colossal laugh
of Secretary Taft whenever the club
demonstrated in its most convincing
manner that he and his cana; We're not
what they were cracked up to be. AS
for Secretary Root, he did the best he
could, but with a hundred or more SEN
ators, representatives, cabinet officers
and newspaper men shouting around
him it was difficult for him to hold his
own with such voices as those of Taft
and Roosevelt.
The dining room was transformed
into Panama for the occasion, and the
club and its guests marched in singing
these prophetic words to the tune Of
when Johnny Comes Marching Home::"
''we're goins. to dig the big canal.
Hurrah! Hurrah
We're going to dig the big canal,
Hurrah! Hurrah!
In Panama we work tonight:
Well do some digging before it's light.
And there'll be more shenanigan
When the dirt begins to fly"
Before they got through they had dug
the canal and flashed upon large
white screen q picture showing the
completed enterprise, and with it por-
trait Of President Roosevelt, wearing
venerable white beard and appar-
emily century old. This was one Of
the things which brought forth that
presidential roar.
First Of all, after the guests had ar
rived they were marshaled into COM
panies. Instead of going into the din
ing hall in the usual way procession
was formed. 1t was headed by Lieu
tenant Santellnann and the Marine
band, all done up in beautiful white
uniforms and looking as summary as
could be. Then came President Roose-
welt Of the United States and President
Richard Lee Fearn of the Gridiron
club. Following them marched the
musical members, clad in working
mems blouses and carrying real picks
and shoyels. In the procession were
ambassadors, cabinet officers. senators
and representatives, railroad presi-
dents-all following a golden gridiron
held aloft. Mark Twain kept pace with
the rest, as lively as boy. Associate
Justice Brewer, sedate and digniied,
was by his side.
AS the band played the members and
the guests made their devious way
through serpentine aisle Of palms,
rubber trees, banana plants and other
tropical vegetation, so tricky placed
together as to make fascinating illu-
sion of a jungle. Everybody in the
march to the banquet hall joined in the
chorus:
We're going to dig the big canal,
Hurrah! Hurrah!
1t is really mistake to say that the
procession entered the banquet hall. It
emerged from the tropical pathway up
on the plaza OF Santa Anna, which, as
every one knows, is the public park Of
the isthmus city The street signs hung
here and there announced that it was
the plaza Of Anna, which was evidence
enough; but, in addition to this, the
room was set with towering cocoanut
palms, with banana trees bearing
punches of real fruit and with other
appropriate decorations in rich profu-
sion. ALI the acts were arranged as II
they were occurring in Panama, and
everybody referred to Washington as
some faroff, distant city.
The culm1na ton Of the evening was
the one act drama entitled Pointers
From Panama; or, How We Could Do
1t If We Had Chance" The guests
were brought face to face with this in
teresting and veracious production by
series of easy stages. Early In the
evening one of the club members came
in, walked around the plaza and dis
tributed with great prodigality huge
wads OF stage money. He lighted q
cigar with thousand dollar bill and
scattered bits Of money on the floor.
t'What does this exhibition mean?"
asked President Fearn.
81 am giving an imitation Of the Pan
ANA canal commission" was the SOL
emn reply, and the laughter that fol-
lowed showed that the guests appre-
ciated the situation. Then followed
this chorus:
oh, shonts and Stevens and all the bunch,
HuIrah! Hurrah!
Will have to get an extra bunch
In Panama!
We've got the shovels. we've got the stun,
And all can see we've got men enough
To dig-dig-dig-dig
Here in Panama.
Another member appeared with
large telescope and seemed to be study
ing the heavens.
What are you looking att" he was
asked.
II am observing the canals Of Mars.
Do you know why they are such a
success?''
No one knew.