The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1906-04-01
SENATE JOKES ON REPORTERS
VETERANS DON'T SEEM TO TAKE
THE YOUNG MEN SERIOUSLY.

C0nnOD'O HI0lDiO
Abashes the visitors with q Purpose.
wAsHrNdroN, March 3i.-They're having
a lot of fun I'D at the Capitol these q
over the philippics OF the young men en-"
ployei by the dime magazines A oon"
siderable Grew OF thess rampageous REFORM
ers Of the planetary system and aneirS
have camped In Washington since the DO
ginning Of the session, observing the an-
horrent rottenness OF this country's system
Of government, pointing the ~accusatory
finger at everybody and everything n
predicting French revolutions II the nationai
legislators don't buck up and be good.
A week or so ago the War Departments
sent to the senate Committee on Mihtary
Affairs a communication with reference to
o new magazine gun. The inventor OF this
weapon wanted to have IL tested by an
army board, with a view TO it's eventusi
adoption as the service rife OF the United
\ States Army.
The War Departments communication
| Uas read to the senate Committee.
~Um-magazine gun, eh2" observed ono
OF the Senators on the committee. Move
the communication be tabled. Seems to
me we've had more than enough to do With
these magazine guns lately" n the COM
mittee, about to rise, laughed individually
and collectively.
A distinguished Senator from the South
west strolled into the barber shop in the
Senate wing the other morning for a shave.
The chairs we're all filed. The Senator.
perceiving this, started to go out, with
the idea Of returning later. Tn head
barber Of the shop sought to detain the
Southwestern Senator. He called after
him in a rather strident tone:
You're next"
The Southwestern n Senator wheeled about,
assumed a sad smile, placed a hand over
his heart as if the futtering there disturbed
him, and said to the head barber:
@Be good enough not to remind me OF
that any oftener than you can help. /
understand perfectly we'll that I'm tabled,
but permit me to enjoy what peace l may
till the blow falls"
And the other Senators in the chairs
| smiled under their lather.
The young reformers who write about
the Senate do not hesitate to drop in 90
oa~sionally upon the Senators on whom
cation. Their attitude in this respect
| appa rently is that, inasmuch as they are
engaged in a great and sacred duty, the
Senators oughtn't to resent it and ought to
be quite prepared to receive the oleansersi
Just as IL nothing had happened, The
Senators don't seem to resent It much.
One Of tho reformers was expounding
things to- a sage old Western Senator IN
the latter's committee room the other fore
noon. The reforiner's method was to
| rehash a great amount Of stuff about the
Senate that has appeared in the news
papers throughout the country for a long
| time past and then to ask the Senator what
he had to say about those things, He
recited a long list, and then he pointed his
young ,forefnger at the sage old Senator
and asked him:
The Senator didn't shift uneasiiy in his
seat" but he smiled his slow smile.
young man." he said, II wish, you'd
give me the name of the clipping bureau
the one that serves me. Why. you've
mentioned half a dozen things against
us here that never saw mentioned IN the
olipp,ngs IS. sent su t. me- How do you re-
The reformer didn't see it, and vent
on telling the sag old Senator about the
| shockingness Of the Senate till the latter
was summoned to the floor: .
meeting Of the Senate Committee on Inter-
| state Commerce one forenoon recently.
One OF the Senators, for information, In
CURED Why Philadelphia received certain
differentials.
swell, tn ere's a reason began. one Of
the well informed Senators, preliminary
Move the gsntlsmaa's remark bs
a%f In the W aof sae rs sis 5 9 Quickly 81 C 9 j 9 saesss sei
one Of the Senators who had been one of
the particular objects Of attack.
1t took the committee about half a minute
to see throu Oh ID, but when they saw IL
the smile fiokered from one end Of the
long table to the other.
Over on the House side, too, they're
extracting their rightful share Of anEse-
a Republican and the other a Democrat.
were leaning across the aisle separating
the two parties in the chamber dangerously
discussing an article Of one Of the reformers
in which the statement was made that the
Representatives under the present rules
had become mere sheep"
"Um," put In the Republican Repre-
sentative, Il s'pose the next article wen
get will be called The Fleece on the House
Of Representatives.
Speaker Cannon hustled into the House
restaurant soon after the assembling OF
the House the other day and ordered a
old time member strolling along saw Mr..
Cannon partaking OF this plain fare,
Huh, pretty bourgeois lunch; Joe,"-he
said to the Speaker.
'sh,sh'c said Uncle Joe; holding ag a
purpose. I'm hoping one Of those spear
finging young menm happen along and,
seeing this layout in front Of me, conclude
that, after all, ! am one OF the pee-pul.'
One OF the reformers, In a recent despair
gave the American people up. He said
that the Senators and Representatives
weren't really responsible for their wicked
ness. The people were at fault. They
didn't have enough sense to send straight
men to Congress, There'd never be any
political health in this country till folks
took a real good look at the kind. Of men
they were sending here TO Washington.
The Senators and Representatives weren't
really responsible for the riot OF rapacity
prevailing here at all, The r~ottenness
wa inherent in,the whole people.
"A little bunch of Representativ yes were
discussing this article at a game Of hearts
played In one Of the clubs the other night.
Well, that lets, us out, all right said
one Of them, breathing q deep sigh Of relief.
Glad to hear I'm just q sort Of fungus
growing, In rottenness. Wonder what l
am. orchid or a streamer Of Louisiana
A distinguished Representative from an
Eastern State, who has been one Of the
most frequent subjects Of magazine attack
as a mere railroad fgurehead,' agent Of
the trusts and so on, got on a Pennsyl-
wanna Avenue car the other evening, clutch