davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1906-03-28

Struck Sick Woman. - brutal as
sault was committed upon Mrs. Robert
Stapleton at her apartments in the
North Putnam block Monday evening
Information was sworn out against
Henry Donahue by the husband of Mrs.
Stapleton and the man was arrested.
According to the story told by Mr..
Stapleton, his wife was assaulted as
she lay i'll in her bed. The man en-
tered the apartments upon a flimsy pre-
text and proceeded TO abuse Mrs. Sta
pleton. Mrs. Stapleton ordered him to
leave and finally, in her excitement,
raised herself up in bed and, reaching
over TO the window SILL hurled flower
pot at her disturber With an oath
the man sprang upon her, striking her
about the face and knocking her down
Her face was badly bruised and she
was in dangerous condition for
hours. As soon as her husband return
ed, a physician was called and. fortu-
nately, Mrs. Stapleton is now believed
to be out of immediate danger.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1906-03-28


nerve tissues, tones Up the heart, gives
ity to the muscles. and richness TO me, Di'
iii he nourish.nent il contains. 1t is in
valuable for overworl-ed men, delicate
women ara .sic.lly children It strength
cns and sIlstairs the system, Is a pro-
rnoter Ct good health and longevity,
makes the Old young and keeps the young
e-srone Cuffy'S is the only whiSl-ey thas
has been recognized Is 4 medicine and IS
Guaranteed absolutely free from fusel oil,
Seven thousand doctors prescribe ana
eco hospitals use DuTy'S Pure -latt
- l.iSEzey exclusively.
BEWARE of dangerous Mutations and snS-
L;itrses. They ere positively harmful and are
sold fo- profit only By interruptions dealers.
Look for the trade mark. the "O!d Chemist, or
The label, and BE certain tiie seal over the cork
is unbrokon. All druggists and Grocers, or
direct, ST 90 a bottle. Doctors advice and
medical BOOKLET Tree. Du.fy Malt Whisky Co.,
Rochester, New YORK
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1906-03-28

The best way TO rid the system of a
cold is to evacuate the bowels. Kenne
dy's Laxative Honey and Tar acts as
a pleasant yet effectual cathartic on
the bowels. 1t clears the head. cuts
the phlegm out of the throat, strength
ems the bronchial tubes, relieves
coughs, colds, Group, whooping cough,
etc. Sold by all druggists.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1906-03-28
A Favorite Remedy for Babies.

Its pleasant taste and prompt cures
have made Chamberlain Cough Rem.
edy a favorite with the mothers OF
small children. 1t quickly cures their
coughs and colds and prevents any
danger of pneumonia or other serious
consequences. 1t not only cures
Group, but when given as soon as the
croupy cough appears will prevent the
attack. For sale by all leading drug
gists.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1906-03-28

All Goes to Wife. - Attorneys
Schmidt & Vollmer have filed for pro-
bate the last will and testament of the
late DR.. J. II. Kulp. The instrument
is dated Nov. 10. 1881 According to
the terms of the instrument. Mrs
Mary Emma Kuip, widow of the de-
ceased, receives his entire estate, to
be used during her lifetime At her
death the children of the testator are
to inherit whatever remains, and il
any of them be deceased their heirs
are to inherit their share. If Mrs.
Kulp marries again the estate is to be
divided among the testator's heirs at
law, as though he had, left no tesla
ment.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1906-03-28
Eminent Doctor Praises

s. Guisinger, Old, Pend1eton,
tinguisfed Practitioner Many Years Standing and
Prominence ia His Profession, Writes Duffys
Malt Whiskey No Equal Whc-e Stimulating and
Strength Building Tonic is Required. f
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1906-03-28

Obituary Record.-John Lichennecke
died at his home, 312 Railroad avenue,
night after six weeks illness
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1906-03-28

Fight Over Politics. - Ora Loving
arrested by Officer Nagel upon infor-
nation sworn out against him by Louis
Niemeyer, was tried upon a charge
of assault and battery in police court
yesterday. The burden of the testi
mony was in favor of Mr.. Loving who
was therefore released. Niemeyer test
flied that he and Loving had been dis
GUESSING politics and that they had diff
fered in opinion and that thereupon.
without provocation, Loving struck
him.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1906-03-28

biel was seized with a fainting spell in
the Lundt & Berglund store Monday
afternoon, and so serious was her con-
ditiOn that DR.. DOndanville was sum-
moned to attend her The lady is a
relative of Emil Christopher and had
just returned from his funeral when
seized. She was removed to the home
of her brother-in-law, Henry Leppert
in Prospect park, and the doctor re-
manned several hours before she was
sufficiently out of danger to warrant
his leaving.
Fire in Shropshire was discovered
about 2:50 yesterday afternoon under
blacksmith shop of the Deere plant.
The blaze was extinguished before the
fire department arrived.
To Have Indignation Meetine.-So-
cialists have decided to hold their in
dignation meeting April s in Turner
hall. Mrs. May Wood Simon of Chi
cago will be here to speak and collec-
ton will be taken to help free the men
accused of being implicated in the MUIR
der of the governor of Idaho.
Obituary Record.-John Lichennecke |
died at his home. 312 Railroad avenue,
Monday night after six weeks illness '
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1906-03-28
PURELY VEGETABLE
AN EFFORT TO PULL THROUGH THE DAY.


put new
thaws
inactive nterh and
% in
growh ~
1canenan ytngIw nw hh c n
stbe
enire rom otsher
IN
stirred, dimpts
the tina
isa irritable deb
ewfn
the
by S.
weakened
that the remedy be that especially adapted the condition and
SIS
he seasonw juuotbef felt S warmer ather come
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1906-03-28
|Ta ze111sI GREATEST
49, 49, OF ALL TONES

s..
bing PREF hem tina the
the geat o S
it is
thr o
follow
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1906-03-28

Fell Out of Window. - Dorothy Phe-
Ian, the 10-year-old daughter of Mr.. and
Mrs. J. Z. Phelan, 1909 Arlington av-
enue. had the misfortune to fall out OF
a second story window Monday after
noon. The child was playing with her
sister at the time and was leaning
against one of the window blinds
which was closed but gave way. She
was picked up unconscious and Drs.
Peck and Hoefie were called and found
that the child was badly injured, haN
ing broken her shoulder blade. The
little one also received several cuts on
her head which it took several stitches
to close.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1906-03-28

Obituary Record. - To Mrs. j. w.
Watzek of Davenport and Mrs. E. g..
Peck of Indianapolis, formerly of this
city, the unexpected news has come
of the death of their father, Charles
Harlan, at Sigourney. Iowa. Mr.. Har-
ian had a stroke of apoplexy over a
year ago, and his death is supposed to
have been from a second stroke. He
was "A years of age and prominent
and long time resident of Sigourney.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1906-03-28
Ds,ffv's Pure Malt Whisky

sanqlapt and tonic bu Tp me
the heart,
enables you TO get from h looo you eat
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1906-03-28

Faints in store.-Mrs. H. H. Klinge-
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-02
A PHYSICAL 1MPoss1B1L1rY

DR.. T. D. Crothers of Hartford re-
Gently declared that drunkards were to
certain extent insane. In describing
some Of the decisions that are due to
mental alterations, Or. Crothers told
an Interesting story.
" "A cert tain ar1stocratic lady, he
said, "got possessed of the delusion
physician, a reputable but prosaic man,
pooh-poohed her trouble, and she grew
steadily worse. Indeed, at the end Of
a month, it looked as if the poor de-
luded woman was going to die.
lin this crisis an eminent specialist
was called in. Having been fore
warned, the specialist came prepared.
He had in his pocket a tiny frog that
he had bought at a pet stock Dealers.
Ihe specialist examined the patient
carefully. He listened with sympathy
to her tale Of the frog hopping about
IN her interior; At the end he said:
are right. There is every indication
Of the presence within you of some
reptile Of considerable size. Please
swallow this bolus.'
HE prepared a bolus foS the lady,
and at the same time got ready a glass
bowl. She swallowed the huge dose,
which made her cough and cough till
the, tears blinded her eyes, and the
physician, bending over her, gave d
loud cry as her paroxysm was at it's
height and at the same time pumped
the frog into the bowl and exclaimed:
".t There! told you! Look at
that!' -.
:. 'The lady opened her eyes, beheld
the frog in the bowl and smiled with
relief and gratitude. Then, all of a
sudden, she turned paler than ever, and
cried in a voice of anguish:
" Oh, doctor, / am not cured. The
frog has left a little one behind
"But this wise specialist was not to
be stumped. He put on his glasses
looked at the frog in the bowl care
fully: Then he said, in a stern and
positive tone:
emo, madam; that is an impossi-
bility; for this frog is male. - g.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-02
THE CURTAIN LECTURER

Frederic Irland, at the last conven-
ton Of the National Association of
Stenographers at Atlantic CITY, said
Of a somewhat harsh rebuke that one
stenographer had administered to an
other:
"That rebuke was a little too cruel.
was it not9 1t reminds me of the
cruelty of a Washington mana piece
of cruelty, wherein stenography played
an unwilling part.
GAS this man came to bed one night
his wife said to him: ~~
- Has the stranger gone? 1 didn It
hear him. T.,
ooh, no, dear, he hash It gone,' the
husband replied. Il have Instructed
the maid to let him out in three or four
hours.
The wife looked amazed and stups,
fed.
'What-why-who on earth is he
anway?' she stammered.
My DEAR said the husband
quietly, che is shorthand reporter
You see, 1 nearly always forget what
you say to me during your discourse
from II till 2, and sometimes | 20 to
sleep while you're talking. So
thought I'd have your lecture written
out tonight, and study it at my leisure
The young man is all ready, the door is
open so that he can hear you, and you
may begin as soon as you like -
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-02
THE PENALTY OF PRIDE

Mrs: Ruth Bryan Leavitt, the daugh-
ter Of William Jennings Bryan, had
been congratulated on the success Of
her brilliant one-act play, "Mrs. s.
Holiness, Detective. - She smiled and
answered.: 81
:. But mustn It grow conceited, must
1? If [ do, my next play will fail, or
something quite as dreadful will hap
pen: Nothing, you know, is so disas-
81 heard my father tell the other
day OF the disastrous conceit of lady
In Berlin. When Ahmed Efendi was
the Turkish ambassador to Germany, it
was his custom, at his various enter
tainments, to distribute Turkish sweet
meats among the ladies present.
AT one Of his most brilliant recep-
tions Ahmed Effendi distinguished a
Berllnese young lady by giving her
twice as many sweets as he gave any,
ono else. That was a great honor, and
scores OF eyes, some Jealous and some
congratulatory, were fixed on the Young
lady as she ate Of the great store of
delicacies on her plate. s*s.
She could not help feeling proud.
And to mark her triumph, to under
score it.. she could not help saying to
the Interpreters: ',:~'s''.
Ask the ambassador why he has
honored me with twice as MANY sweets
as any of the other ladies'
1.-The interpreter put the question,
got his answer, and repeated it in a
loud voice.
'x ellis excellency says, fraulein, your
mouth me l ,, IS twice as large as any of the
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-02
CONCERNING DOORS

A generous lump of soda placed in
pots and pans in which fish. cabbage,
onions and other strong-smolling foods
have been cooked, will make them smell
sweet and clean.
A teaspoonful Of vinegar boiling on
the stove will counteract the smell of
strong food.
A teaspoonful of ground cloves on a
few hot Goals will produce the same re-
suit.
:, A. sponge placed in a saucer of boil
ing hot water. in which has been added
teaspoonful Of oil Of lavender, gives a
fragrance of violets to room in which
it is placed. Flies will not remain
where the odor of oil of lavender is.
A stale crust of bread boiled with
cabbage will absorb the disagreeable
odor.
A large lump Of charcoal in a~refripe-
rator will prevent a musty smell.
A pound of copperas dissolved in boil
ing water, if poured into drain pipes,
will dissolve the grease and other i'm
purities.
!. An onion breath may be gotten rid of
by swallowing mouthful of vinegar or
drinking half a cup of hot water in
which pinch of baking soda has been
dissolved.
A few mouthfuls of limewater, or a
few drops of the tincture of myrrh in a
tumbler Of water will sweeten an un-
pleasant breath, and a small piece of
orris root, if chewed, will give a violet
odor to the breath. .''<-*
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-02
NEW FASHION FOR MEN

- IAN attempt will be made this win
ter said a New York tailor, ''to get
our men to dress in town as ENGLISH
men dress-in a tail coat, either a
frock or morning coat, and a silk hat.
. slEnglishmen only wear sack suits
and derbies or soft hats in the country,
or travelling, or abroad. Always, in
: London, their coats are black, their
collars stand up, and their hats are Of
shiny silk. In parliament, on the Stock
Exchange at the fashionable restaur-
ants, all the men are dressed the same.
go Some few Americans have for
years, like Englishmen, worn tail coats
their sack suits and turn down collars
for country life. How the attempt to
dress all Of us like that will 90, I rath-
er doubt. The American, you know,
abOminates coat tails. - go. -
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-02
COMPRESSED FACTS

Sailors suffer most from rheumatism.
Spanish theaters have no programs. 4
/, Switzerland 8 revenue from tourists
last summer was $25, 900 900: s.
4 Over a 900, 900 bottles Of pickles are
eaten weekly in the United States.
In man a; and woman Of equal height
and weight, the woman's tongue is
smaller than the man s..
q southern Egypt there is no dew
fall, and sometimes only twenty min
utes of rain for the whole year.
Every employe of, the English post
office gets a wedding present from the
government when he marries.
E No bird can fly backwards. The
dragondy, besides outstripping the
swiftest bird, flies backward with ease.
A church in London still draws an
income which was bequeathed it for the
purpose Of buying wood wherewith to
burn heretics
There are stars SO distant that fy-
ing achine, moving at the rate Of 500
miles an hour, would require 100000
GOO years to reach them.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-02
BEWARE THE BACTERIA

"Boil your water at this season.
and If you eat fruit, wash it first. For
this is the bacteria season. At no time
IN the year are bacteria so plentiful as
now -.
The speaker, chemist, resumed SOL
emily: H.. -. -
"Call them germs, microbes, bacte-
ria, what you will, there are twice as
many of them about in the autumn as
at any other season. Hence it behooves
us to be careful till the cold comes,
freezing them off. -. ="s~
'These creatures increase very rap
idly. President Roosevelt, watching
the growth of bacteria families, would
rejoice. There is no race suicide
among. them: Indeed, in dry autumn
bacteria will often propagate at the
rate of 100000 a day., -
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-02
SERVANTS PENSIONS

"They are going to start,' said a
maid servant, "a servants school in
Cleveland-a school to teach us how
to cook and clean.
"I'd like to start here servants >
stamp-book of the German kind. That
book is required by law in Germany,
and it is a very good thing.
EVERY German servant has stamp
book, a small book like stamp album,
and. every week, on payday this book
tress pastes in it new Scent stamp.
''That is the servants pension
money, the money to help keep her in
sickness or in old age. 1t ism It much,
8 cents week, but it mounts UP. 1T
keeps servants from indulgence. It is
a good thing.'
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-02
HIS BROADENED SCOPE

When Simeon Simpson bought his suit
or evening clothes, three years ago,
He showed no unusual bullying out,
He hadn't as yet begun to be stout
1t isn't polite to say fat you know
When
the -
tailor
fashioned
those
clothes
for
he
was
straight
front
like go. '''
this,
and
slim. ~.
Like many another honest man.
Simeon Simpsons broadened some
The hair his temples is getting gray.
He has put the hopes of his youth away
And sober ones in their stead have come.
And
--. when
he .....
chances.
view III
his :.
front = ...'+-
looks
something .-- -.
49,. like 1872 II
this . -
..a.. to s Il
.+.-.- ar,,. =. ..--'. you. r., -
Simeon Simpson and his wife
Were invited out a few nights ago:
1t was occasion for evening dress:
In tones that Were laden with bitterness
hour
.'r .'- - When it .-...i. ..--..
e.. - he was -...
hung open <- -. 49,
his like 49,
III. suit ~ this ..-...:.
the down s@... s.. f.
...--.-a r., hook the .. ...-. T. -
~ r..sa...- a. back So. @,5s,-,
, 4ssus,>-.. ack%! rs.-.
,.ssSar Chicago Record Herald
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-02
NAUTICAL IGNORANCE

Young Captain Sealby of the White
Star liner Cretic was talking about the
Ignorance Of the sea and of nautical
terms that is sometimes displayed by
female passengers. ,.~,,* ~ II -,
=. Last fall,,'' he said ''there was a
young lady from Warwick whom, I
showed over the Storage. 49,: -.-s- >,
- AS we were making our tour, the
Storage people were eating their din
ner, and couldn' It help remarking the
tremendous appetite Of red-haired
man. -, = ,.~.,
:" Great. Jupiter said, Gust look
at the amount of food that fellow con-
sumes.' -. -. - 4,
"I suppose, captain said the young
lady, that he is what you sailors call
a StOWay ~ .-'t- -. ~-'
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-02
"A String Of
Good Stories
81 cannot tell how the truth may be;
say tie tale as twas told to me-"
A FOOTBALL ENTHUSIAST

w. j. Clothier, the tennis champion
Of America, said at a dinner in Phila-
delphia: RS 49,
Tennis, is all very well in it's way,
but what is the excitement, what is the
enthusiasm Of tennis, compared to that
of football?
Perhaps you have heard of that
Pennsylvania guard who, coming to at
the end OF football game, whispered
to the physician bending over him: b
Did we win, doctor?' .
Yes; hands down. the physician
answered. - = ,>ssSs ,a."= -. "
s'The guard flushed with joy. -
- Never mind that fractured thigh,
then, doc he said. Just. take these
broken teeth out of my mouth SOS 1
can holler.' - - = -.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-02
on oysters, but I have seen severa
persons sugar their fish,
A CURIOUS TOSTI ITEM

"Tosti, the famous composer said
a musician, " has an odd hobby, the
hobby Of upholstering. The chair you
are sitting on was upholstered by Tosti
'The great author of 'Good-by, Sum
mer. Goodby,' when he is not compos-
ing, is teaching, and when he is not
teaching, is upholstering. Every chair
in his wife 8 drawing room was up
holstered by Tosti himself
"The man is continually on the look
out; for fine old chair frames. All he
finds he buys and upholsters, keeping
the finished product for himself or
sending it as a gift to some friend.'
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-02
Curios and Oddities
THE FIRST AUTOMOBILE

"The first automobile said the
chauffeur, as he paid his fine genially,
twas made by Johann Haustack of
Nuremberg, in 1872. Its motive pow.
er was neither oil, steam, nor electric
ity, but coiled spring.
"The first steam automobile was
built in France by Cugnot in 1910. It
is still to be seen. It is one of the
star exhibits of the Conservatolre des
Arts ct Meters in Paris. Steam car
riages modelled after It were built by
William Murdoch, James Watt, Ma
than Read and Richard Trevethich.
These are, most Of them, in museums in
London and Birmingham.
"Several steam carriages piled for
hire on the streets of London at the
beginning Of the nineteenth century,
but they were so slow, noisy and heavy
that the people did not take to them
"The first modern automobile was
built by Amadee Bollec in 1873, Boil
lee exhibited his car in Vienna and in
Paris, and other men, as is always the
case, devised improvements on it. All
tomobiles, by about 1890, began to
appear in the jokes Of the day; they
had taken their place. But it was not
until the annual cup races began in
France in 1894 that the automobile be.
came really popular institution
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-02
RECORD SENTENCE FOR ERRORS

A grammarian was talking about
grammatical slips that, thru their mag
nltude, merited Immortality. =
'"There is one sentence,' he said,
that has lived for hundred years on
account of it's tremendous incor-
RICHNESS: In this sentence every word
every single word, is ungrammatical.
1t 8 hard to bear that, ism It it?
-, :Ihe sentence was spoken by lit
at the focks, she said to the Shepherd:
us them Sleeps yourn?' =
This sentence, with every word in
correct, holds the record in its Glass;
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-02
A TIP ON BOTANY

William G.. Whitney, Jr., who has
spent a year in Indian Territory learn
ing practical mining at Quapaw, de-
scrlbed at dinner party in New York
a QuapaW, restaurant. -, ~...s
At this restaurant one evening"
he said at his description s end, "two
miners near me got into a botanical
argument about the pineapple, one
claiming that it was fruit, and the
other that it was a vegetable.
In the midst of their argument the
waiter entered in his shirt sleeves, and
looked about to see what was the cause
of the loud talking.
s'The miners decided to let the wait
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-02
QUEER TASTES

The waiter, being eg-weary-leg-
WEAKNESS is a recognized walters dis
order--was taking a day off.
"There are,' he said, as he puffed
at his pipe and swung TRANQUILITY to
and fro in his rockingchair, there are
some queer tastes, seen by walters.
You know. the prediction of school
girls for cake and pickles? Well, I
have seen that beat often.
I've got a customer who puts sugar
on white potatoes. Sugar on tomatoes
and cantaloup is pretty bad; but sugar
on ..potatoes-ugh!
"a lady customer, corsetmaker,
melts a lump Of butter in her cup Of
tea: Could you 60 that9
"A pugilist puts vinegar on all his
meats and all his vegetables vinegar
on everything except his dessert. This
is not because he wants to reduce his
weight; it is because he likes the TASTE
"Of course / have lots of customers
who drink sour milk and eat high game
and cheese-customers for whom we
ripen milk and cheese and birds till the
aroma Of our cellars ripening Z end
would cause a turkey buzzard to quail.
~ have never seen anyone put sugar
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1906-11-02

or settle their argument, and accord
ingly one of them said: :"
Pete, what is pineapples Is it
fruit or a vegetable?'
1.-The waiter, Ticking the ash from
his cigar, smiled at the two men with
1t IS neither, gents he said. It's