The Birmingham age-herald., 1906-12-09
AFFILIATIONS IF
 THE DEBUTANTE Here She Must Become Woman
 of the World SHE TRAVELS A HARD ROAD No Easy Task for Her to Obtain Social opuarity-"Making Good"
 In Her First Year
 Out.
SHE TRAVELS A HARD ROAD
From the New York Sun.

always strewn with roses. Compared with an English debutante her lot might all most be called hard.
 At her coming out tea luncheon, dinner or dance and for a blissful fortnight or so afterward the debutante herself does not realize this.
 It is only when some big social affair comes off and a debutante finds herself left out of the list of invited guests that she drops from her cloud of illusion and awakes to the fact that the debutantes road is not after all the easiest in the world to travel. From that moment care sits on her brow. But long before that care has beun to sit on her mothers brow; for, as one mother pointed out, to be the parent of d debutante has it's draw backs
 Tn England,' said she, girls are intro- duced so gradually, as a rule, that their mothers are spared no end of fuss and expense, and the girl herself in the end is by no means the loser In fact, 1 am in clined to think she is the gamer.
 Take an unattractive girl, for instance, by which l mean one who is nothing of a convefsat ationalist, or who has not the art of doing and saying the right thing at the right moment, or of making herself agree able no matter in what company she finds herself; who perhaps is utterly lacking in tact as many young girls are; who is eX- tremely diffident in d company of older people, as young English girls are pretty sure to be. Instead of pushing her out to stand or fall alone, she appears first in her mothers train at informal affairs, and her card is left with her mothers when the latter makes calls. If on such occasions the daughter sits perfectly mum or tries to hide in the background no one pays any attention to her.
 Tt is an exception for any one to in- vite her to a large social Junction. where al least half the number of guests are far removed from the debutante class. There are English girls out of the ordinary to whom this happens, but the average debu- tante just out of school never has this experience. During her first two or three months out the English girl has a chance to gain courage, to learn gradually how to do it, to find herself, in fact
 Wears Simple Gowns.
 And her gowns during this period are generally of the simple schoolgirl type; society not apparently expecting her to resemble an up to date fashion plate The mother of such a girl, l say, has an easy time of it during this introductory stage and the girl herself a very dull time, which saves her, however a good many unhappy hours later on.
 "In this country, especially in New York, things are managed differently. The school girl must emerge into d society woman practically in night. In deport- ment and clothes almost as much is expected of a debuante as of a girl who has been out several years, and if she doesn't make good, as the boys say, during her first season her chances for l.-fIl NNs.f
 "A friend of mine called the other day to ask about what sort of gowns and how many of them she ought to provide for her daughter, who comes out this month, and when l told her better count on many frocks as there are weeks in the season she protested. Then l went on to explain.
 "The New York debuante is expected to wear the lightest, airest and freshest of gowns made of tulles, laces, chiffons etc., materials the most perishable and which lose their freshness very quickly when worn hard.
 Tn her second season she may wear a different type of gown, wear gowns of less perishable varietyfi but she cannot do it at the start if she would be considered well dressed. But clothes are the least worrying part of it.
 'The trouble is New York expects :. great deal of it's debuantes, and some of them don't find this out at the start In England a debuante her second sea son out is asked everywhere on account of her family, whether she is pretty or plain dull or lively. Not so here. That rule only applies to the first three or four weeks of her debuante career, when dances, luncheons and theatre parties are arranged specially to entertain the sea- sons crop the mother of each being eX- pected to take a turn at the entertain ring. During this time the debuantes are sized up, if I may use the expression, lsand those who fail to make themselves finteresting stand very little chance of be- f ing asked to important dinners, to house tparties to auto jaunts and that sort Of thing no matter whose daughters they are"
 Rules for Debutante.
 When asked what rules she would pre- scribe for debutante who would make good" this mother answered:
 Most important of all she must have something to say, by which l mean sui ficient knowledge of current events to be able to talk intelligently on them, or at least listen intelligently. Now this sounds easy out it is not. Introduced to the average debutante almost every one finds that she talks weather. or the party last night, and these subjects failing, falls back on personalities, if she talks at all.
 cone of the prettiest debutantes of last wear is. I fear, suffering an eclipse be- cause of this. She will not take the trouble to read q newspaper or magazine. and the only topics she is posted on are where she has been and to what enter tainments she expects to go.
 ''On the other hand, my little niece, who is very plain and has no presence at all, spends some time every day boring over the sporting columns. reading up college news and even wading through ac- counts of financial deals and scandals. She is far from being a good talker, her stock of small talk is the smallest; but because she really does have a slight knowledge of what interests men and Of what is going on in circles other than her own she is a prime favorte.
 .The next quality which makes for pop ularity is unvarying good humor In deed I don't know but what l ought to nut that first Not one in fifty debutantes, I think. is always good humored in com pany or at least is wise enough to keep her i'll humor concealed.
 'It is vexing. I admit, for girl to get the cold shoulder however unintention- ally, by her brothers best friend to see a girl she doesn't like get more cotillon favors than herself; to hea rone of her associates get an invitation to a house party she herself is just aching in vain to be included in. But to appear vexed or jealous will only make matters worse
 Animation is very important asset to debutante's success. Look dull or indifferent and the knell of social popu- ]arity for her is sounded. N omatter