The Rathdrum tribune. (Rathdrum, Idaho) 1903-1963, 1906-11-02
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The Quickest way.-Tommy (dress.
Cd for evening ty)-Mother, shall
1 wash my hands or put on my gloves
Mamma, what Is a grass widow p
"A grass-wldow, dear-is lady whose
husband plays golf.--London By.
stander.
Home, Sweet Home
Through fats and apartments
Though we may roam,
Be they ever SO charming
They're too dear for home!
You ought not to work such lonA
hours. Surely your boss can get along
without you part Of the time" "Sure
ne can. But don't want him to find
It out Cleveland Leader.
Benners-Those college professors
listened to lecture three hours long.
Jenners-What OF it? Benners-Noth-
ing; only they say "a word to the wise
Is sufficient. philadelphia Telegraph.
Well, Yes.-"We all have our bur
dens to bear" remarked the minister.
Life at best is but series Of trials I"
i don't mind the trials. parson," said
Senator Smoothguy, Its the convic.
tons that hurt"
The Mine that Goes to the WALL
Cokeley-My what lot of mines are
being exploited now. Jokeley-Yes
and there's one mine that's bound to
go to the wall. Cokeley-Whats that?
Observation-Disclosures
why do you think all Is not right
between Mr.. and Mrs. Washington ?"
They are SO often seen together late
~. 1t must be that they have some
reason for trying to drown suspicion"
Chicago Record Herald.
Tom-Here! You've started your
note to Borroughs' "Dr. Sir" Don't
you know that sort Of Authorization Is
very slovenly? Dick-No, sir. DR."
Is all right in this case. He owes nv
money.-Philadelphia Press.
Red Cows and Black Cows.-Wagg
80 you've taken to farming. ] sup
pose you've noticed that red cows eat
more than black ones. Wigg-No, I
didn't How do you account for i'll
Wagg-There are more of them.
Couldn't Tell. - Teacher-If yoUz
mother bought four baskets of grapes,
the dealers price being twenty-five
cents per basket, how much money
would they cost her? Tommy-Cou!d.
MT tell. Mas great at bargains.
1ndorsement-Uncle Jerry PEBBLES
was looking over the list Of amended
spellings" recommended by the reform.
ers. Why" he exclaimed II don't
see anything strange In them words.
That's the way I've allus spelled EN-"
Out Of Order.-Teacher- Thomas, IL
saw you laugh just now. What ars
you laughing about? Tommy was
just thinking about something. Teach.
er-You have no business thinking dur
ing school hours. Don't let 1t occur
again.
Mamma thought there was an ap-
pie on the sideboard and l was goina
to give 1t to you, but 1t has disappear.
ed. Fred-Well, you can give me some
thing In the place of it, mamma, cause
the apple wasn't much good, anyway
Pathfinder.
His Rule of Action.-"John Henry"
said Mrs. Bickers to her husband, st
Is time we returned the Gilkinson's
CALL" II have no intention of return
Ing It," said Mr.. Bickers. "Why not?"
Because l believe In returning good
for evil"
On the Safe Side.-"What's that sign
you're making hereT Fresh eggs"
replied the new clerk. Make it Fresh. |
laid eggs" "Why = er-everybody
knows the eggs were fresh when they |
were laid" Exactly, and that's all |
that it's safe for us to say about then"
A Good Fish-Line, Too.-"Now, boys.
what is the axis of the earth?" "The
axis of the EARTH" said Johnny, "is
an imaginary line which passes from
one pole to another, and on it the earth
revolves" Very good, Johnny" said
the teacher. "COuld you hang clothes
on that line" Eyes, SIR" "Oh, In.
deed; and what sort of clothes, may
ask?" Imaginary clothes, SIR"