Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1906-08-11
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Scissors.
a Hard Task.-"There's no danger"
said the doctor, It's only carbuncle
coming on the back Of your neck. But
YOU must keep your eye on It"
No Reply.-"That little girl has one
bad habit She always answers back"
1T Is easy enough to break her of that
Set her place as a telephone girl"
Il hear your boss expects to raise
your salary this month" so he says;
sat he hasn't succeeded in raising all
" last months yet-Philadelph,a
Press
Give me a package of chewing
gum" We don't keep such things"
We'll, you've got 4 card in the window
that says Typewriter Supplies. -
Houston Post,
What kind OF pie Will you have
Which Ince Or appleT' IN take two
pieces Of each, please" Two pIeces.'
"Ne'enL Mamma told me not to ask
twice Life.
Lovcr~-lndeed love you for your
self alone, Miss Milyuns. ueiress-That
IS loan on which you can only Dor.
row trouble, Mr.. CaShunter.-Ba
more American.
Nictim--What has happened? Where
! am Il Doctor You have been seri-
ousiy injured In trolley accident But
cheer up-you will recover. Victim
/ How much?--Cleveland Leader.
Servants Who Hang On.-"PublIc
)fIiccholders, said Cityman, ARE only
servants after all" YES" rejoined
Subbubs, land I wish we could get
servant who would hang on like they
/ TO-"
Where Ignorance Is Bliss Blobbs--
/ When | get up to make speech feel
as though l had forgotten everything
knew. Slohhs-What an Ideal witness
you would make in trust iuvestiga-
/ ton
A young lady went into well-known
establishment few days ago and said
to the hoor-wnlkcr; 10 you keep sta
tloncryT NO, miss" replied the man;
III l did should lose my job. Head
light.
For goodness sake What's that
uolsef' The girl next door is having
her voice cultivated" Huh! Appar-
entity the process Of cultivation has
reached the narrowing season" Phila'
lelphia Ledger.
Tramp (outslde the gate) Does
your dog bitter Mrs Weptonwish Ton
the porch) Yes, he does, and-oh.
please. don't come lnt We are so par
ticular about what we feed him Som
ervllle Journal.
Mrs. peckem--I know I'm trlfle
irritable at times, Henry, but II l had
TO live my life over again I'd marry
you Just the same Mr.. Peckem Oh.
40, you wouldn't! You only think you
Eould.-tScissors.
Hopeless FIynn-Ol tell ye2 they's
40 use thryln' to lddcaatc thin Choi-
aese MuIhooley An phwy's thot2
Flynn-Oi list asked van nv thin the
Choinese wurrud for St patrick's day.
an he couldn't tell me,
Mrs. Jawback Just Ike man The
dea Of losing your temper and swear
ng ut your razor because It's dun.
Mr.. Jawback Wen, I've got right
TO- Didn't the razor lose its temper
FIRST ?-Cleyeand Leader.
Visiting neutrality-suspicious. morn
Ing. madam | am collecting for the
! Drunkar,is' Home. Mrs. Mcclure
Shure I'm glad Of it, sor--lf ye come
round tonight yez can take my hus-
band Harper's Weekly.
Rlvcrs-What have you got that
string tied around your finger for?
Brooks by George! I'm glad you
mentioned IT, That's to remind me to
ask you for the flyer / lent you
month ago,--Cblcago Tribune.
do you think that wealth Is essen
hal to happiness7' From some Of the
letters | receive said Dustin Stay,
4 am inclined to think a number Of
people consider some of my wealth cs-
sential to their happiness. FIX.
She-Albcrt. | have come 10 the con
.lusion that I love George better than
/ | love you. AMI IIc-What about
the engagement ring I gave you TO
wear? Shc-Oh, That's all right
George says he won't object II I wear
T.
( aIr. subbubs what's the matter2