davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01
British officers.

HaZiug Is by no means confined to the
American military service academies. nor
IN foreign countries, to the embryo fighters
In England. 1t now appears hazing IS prac-
ticed by officers of the army in a fashion
20 dispel ali wonder at the lamentable In
efficiency of that force during the war with
the Beers. For very many years II has
been the fashion TO regard army life as a
career" for young men OF family and In
huence. The pay OF subaltern officer has
always been considered as entirely too small
to serve as the sole means OF support. The
young officer who entered the army without
private income was certain TO be humil-
lated II he did not run deeply into debt, and
the army records are freely punctuated
with cases OF disgrace In the courts and
suicides to avoid exposure brought about
by the extravagant living OF wearers OF the
uniform of the king or the queen.
The other day young officer OF guards
regiment at Aldershot was reported to his
superlors as being absent without leave.
Investigation followed and he was found In
a hotel. suffering from nervous prostration.
His physician told a story which is now
being examined by the army authorities II
true, 1t reveals a condition of affairs which
will probably call for grand shake up In
the British military service. II appears that
this young officer. having no private means.
determined 10 live on his pay, which In the
eyes OF his wealthier associates stamped
him as a "bounder." an outsider. He was.
OF course, forced 10 absent himself from
many festivities and TO eschew high play
and deep drinking. The less rigid members
OF his mess proceeded to punish him for his
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01
Sentenced to Bed.

Bennington Kan. has police judge who
Is wiser than many others. He views hui
man nature from the standpoint of COM
mon sense He knows it's weakness and
its needs. He has evidently particularly
strong grip on the foibles of the bibulous
citizen. The other day an old imbiber was
hailed before this wise judge on charge
of being drunk. That was not unusual He
had been there before, many time. The
judge decided to give him novel course
Of treatment He fined him 50 and then
sentenced him to spend one week in bed,
with an injunction upon his family to no.
tify the court If the culprit showed a dis
position to leave the covers before the ex-
piration of his term.
This is a happy expedient. There is no
worse punishment for some men than to
be put to bed. Some other men, of course,
are so lazy that such a treatment would
be delectable. 1t is even to be suspected
that they would gladly get drunk now and
then to secure sentence of this kind from
the court. But the convivial spirit will
rebel vigorously against a forced spell of
rest. After the first day two he will
"holler fearful the boys say. There is,
In truth. no work so hard for man of ac-
ton as the work of keeping still under Or
ders.
But what about the family of this Kan
boozer? Isn't the week-in- bed treat
ment rather rough on them? 1t is not DIFF
ficult to imagine the state of the atmosphere
after a day or two of enforced idIeness
on the part of the thirsty husband and
father. There are some wives who would
gladly brave the anger of the court rather
than entertain such prisoner for a week.
OF course, the culprit might be kept quiet
by doses of his favorite tipple. and the dis
patches are unfortunately incomplete in re-
gard to the precautions that have been
taken by the judge to ensure sobriety dur
ing this week In bed. Those who are study
ing the problem Of the liquor evil should in
vestigate this case thoroughly and ascertain
the result of the experiment.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01
Youth of the United States

The charge Is often made by old nations
that the United States is too young It is
indeed true that the United States has not
as much moss on it as some other nations
have. but there are persons who believe
that too much moss is a symptom of de-
cay. A nation when personifed takes the
feminine gender and nobody of that gender
ever complained of being considered too
young
1t is habit in the United States to tear
down old houses when they have outIived
their usefulness OF course, in Washing
ton there are exceptions TO this rule, but
as general proposition when house
gets in a tumble-down condition, and be-
comes unsafe and insanitary the authori-
is built This is grave national fault
1t may have some advantages but 1t inter
feres with the supply Of ruins. In some
parts of the world when a house becomes
unfit for human habitation it is used as
ruin. Some persons consider ruins a
luxury.
There are certain advantages in ruins
1t seems Impossible to keep up an adequate
supply of ghosts without ruins. A ghost
would live in a ruin without plumbing
gas fixtures. elevator. telephone or electric
light In preference to a brand-new house
with all modern Improvements.
But the United States is not beyond hope
It is growing old at the same rate at which
other nations have grown old And if
fast living causes rapid oncoming of old
age, the United States is aging more
quickly than those nations that have
grown so old that they hardly live at all.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01
JEROME'S JEREMIAH.

From the Rochester Post Express.
BY what right does William Travers Je-
rome take the chair of censor of reckless
speech?
From the Jacksonville Times Union.
Jerome is not a yellow journalist He
lacks the journalist part of the combina-
ton.
From the Knoxville Journal and Tribune
Experience Is teacher and some people
say William Travers Jerome ought to be a
judge of hysteria.
From the Lewiston Evening Journal.
Mr.. Jerome claims that this country is
suffering from an aggravated case of hys-
terra. Anyhow Mr.. Jerome's talk aggra-
Yates Il.
From the Cincinnati Times Star.
Even that energetic and fearless young
man, William Travers Jerome. shows signs
of firing OF the hysterical type of reform
when some people make up their minds that
1t is about time for him to take up the
role OF the reformed-not of the reformer.
From the Providence Tribune and Telegram.
Mr. District Attorney Jerome speaks
rather less entertainingly before dinner
than after. but somewhat more discreetly.
From the Phiiadelphia Public Ledger.
There Is nothing in the rumor that Jerome
has lost his head. The organ is still on his
shoulders. chin up.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01
A HEADLESS OCTOPUS.

From the Detroit Free Press.
Mr. Archbolds statement that Standard
OIL has no master Is merely another slur
at the law of Missouri.
From the Indianapolis Star.
Mr. Archbold vice president of the Stand
ard Oil Company, says there Is no master
mind in that great corporation. Thomas
w Lawson has frequently said that the
mind which controls 1t is that of FL. II. Rog-
ers. Now which Is to be believed?
From the Detroit News.
Mr.. Archbold is going to have consider
able difficulty in convincing the public that
there Is no human responsibility for Stand
ard Oil.
From the Detroit Journal.
Mr. John D. Archbold says there's no
one head to the Standard OIL Company"
We had suspected 1t was all teeth, nails
and stomach.
From the Rochester Herald
It appears from Mr.. Archbolds statement
that Standard OH has no great controlling
mind. The machinery of this organizatio
is 50 perfect as to suggest perpetual motion.
From the Baltimore Evening Herald.
Mr.. Archbold says that there Is no mas
ter-rnind ia Standard OIL. But there seems
to be number OF strong-arm men with
hillies
From the Ptttsburv Press.
Mr. Rockefeller has had no connections
with the business for ten years."-John d.
Archboid of the Standard OIL Company.
Another of those aiibis.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01
Rockefeller Tales.

They are telling all sorts of tales on John
=. Rockefeller nowadays, with the white
light OF publicity beating about him In his
constructive absence from view. Stories
OF his ingenuity in lodging the subpoena
servers, stories of his escapades in dis
guise stories of his wild dashes out of
bounds in armored automobile, stories
OF his visits TO his newly born grandson.
Then there are stories of his past life.
plenty of them. ranging from mere anec-
dotes to dramatic happenings in which he
figures as hero or villain according to the
taste of the reader.
The latest yarn TO be spun about the big
oil man comes from Cleveland. which is in
deed responsible for most of the tales with
an historic flavor According to this story,
last summer John D. Rockefeller heard
hoy sing at a beer garden and was greatly
impressed by his wonderful voice. Now
this is a frankly incredible yarn. II diff
fers from many others. which, seek to per-
suade the hearer. 1t Is incredible, at the
outset because no one who is IN the least
degree acquainted with the habits OF the
modest. retiring and Notwithstanding
John =. Rockefeller will believe for a mo-
ment that he frequents beer gardens. 1t is,
~ course, possible. that he was permitted
q private view" with the public excluded.
But John d. at a beer garden, under any
circumstances? Away with the thought.
Well whether he heard the boy at the
beer garden, or overheard him while he
was whizzing past in a motor or carriage
or what not. the tale runs that so impressed
with the lads voice was John D. that he
took him out of his place as a public singer
IN a berry atmosphere and promised him
and his mother to put up the cash neces-
sary for a good education. The tale is en-
broidered with details For Instance It is
related that shortly after the departure from
lie beer garden the boy visited John D. 5
nome and the oil king talked books and
flowers and poetry and religion to him and
then asked him to sing. The lad responded
with hymns, which brought tears to the
eyes OF the maguate, who asked for song
after song, and the concert finally ended
with 81 Need Thee Every Hour" the sig
nifcancc of which apparently was lost upon
the listener. for 1t is said that since then
lie has not put up penny while the boy
has had TO go back to the beer garden.
Rather a clumsy bit of Rockefeller fiction.
after all But it will serve for the brief
hour Of its narration and gossip, and then
perhaps there Will be others, more ornate
and more sklllfully constructed. John d..
IS a veritabfe inspira ton to the manufac-
turers Of touching tales. He never denies.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01
Cruelty to Genius.

times Ii is the writer who meets with dis
appointment. and sometimes 1t is the read
err Usually 1t Is the latter. The discour-
agement to which some young authors are
exposed Is heart-breaking. Indeed, many
young authors are not only heart-broke but
dead-broke The public Is notoriously un-
sympathetic. and tho landlady In notorious
part OF the public. 1t Is no discredit to an
author to be poor, because some OF the
richest authors arc the poorest writers. Ii
q mans literary talent were true index
10 his fiscal standing many authors OF tina
six best sellers would be insolvent Lit
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01

erary regions of the country. az. for exam
pie. the vicinity of Boston, have repeatedly
charged that literary csaItHfe Is neglected
In tina south. 1t would not be altogether
fair to denounce the south for neglect Of
literary culture on the unsupported word Of
Boston iIferati, because into New England
literary opinion now ard then creeps SOME
local prejudice or even. In exceptional In
stances, sectioua. bias. AT least such
condition has sometimes been suspected by
,ther sections of the country.
1t would really seem, however, In support
of the Boston view OF the situation, that
Georgia. though it is the birthplace of dia-
lect stories. is not only Indifferent to bud
ding writers, but positively repressive. The
opinion is based on the following news dis
watch:
AbbeviIle. Ga, March 2T.-Three men are
dead and two brothers are In jail on
charge of murder because. 1t is alleged, the
latter wanted the sensation which follows
homicide and trial for murder In order to
be able to describe it in book which they
propose writing. The slain men are c. b.
Durch and George and James MeDuff1e,
Joe Watts. twins. Burch was shot to death
in the public road by Cub Watts and the
McDuffie brothers were shot by Joe Watts
two days later at public gathering. Eye
witnesses say that there was no pfoyoca-
ton in either case and Cub Watts <Wnen
arrested SAID that all he wanted to do was
to kill a man, serve a term in the periten-
tiary and then get out and write book.
Il can write the book | have in mind so
much better" Cub said IF | am able to
write from actual experience OF murder.
Joe, my brother. was animated by the same
desire The Watts boys have been Wen
educated and think they have literary tai
emit
These young men were advocates Of real
realism in literature. They were unwilling
to dupe their readers by writing on subjects
OF which they had no personal knowledge.
1t has been suspected that not all authors
are so honest
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01
The New Regime In Russia.

says the Washington correspondent of
the st. Petersburg Daily Mall in his latest
letter to that newspaper:
My American friends made it very I'M
comfortable for me the other day when the
cable announced that ore Russian con-
situency had voted for pet dog In the
election for representative TO serve In the
duma, while the men in large factory in
another district had voted for the smoke
stack of the establishment. Finally good
natured fellow came to my relief with a lit
tie story, which I repeat to you: Smith
was in Congress serving his first term.
Jones, whom he had defeated for the place.
opposed again, and lively race began for
the party nomination, which in that district
was equivalent to election. The two can
didates agreed to submit their claims to a
primary--a non-officiaI affair arranged by
their friends-both men to be represented
in the election officers. AS was to be sup
posed the Smith men in Jones' home
county were none too vigilant. and the
Jones men in Smiths home county worked
at a disadvantage. The day arrived, the
polls were opened. and in the cities and
towns there was great stir. But in some
OF the country precincts the people were
lethargic and things dragged, the election
officers entertaining themselves with cards
or pistol practice.
an Jones home county his friends in the
back precincts won over the Smith men.
and entered upon q scheme to give their
man a rousing vote. They not only recorded
every man who presented himself, but even
the absentees. Then they adopted other
means of swelling the majority.
CHANGING across the road an election
hat &c
tree, and I'm sure would vote for Mr..
Jones If it could express itself. Suppose
We take its preference for granted. And
D. Wood went down on the books.
Well, what's the matter with that
hockberry? Why play favorites in the
forest? And II. Berry was recorded for
Jones.
:. That yellow hound lying there is from
the Stevenson pack and Mr.. Jones often
hunts with that pack. Suppose we record
our four-legged friend And Y. H. Hunter
went into the Jones column.
And how about that guinea fowl over
there on the fence? Female suffrage doesn't
go in this state, but let's make an excep-
ton in this case. And G. Fowl voted for
Jones.
an this way Jones home county was
made to give him a tremendous majority,
and he won out by few hundred in the
district on the general count
Smith and his friends shifted the skull
duggery. and demanded investigation.
Even a bolt was suggested. But as two
candidates in the one party would mean
the loss of the district to the opposition
party, and as Smith was a loyal party man
first of all, he at last gave in, and Jones
made the race and was elected Smith,
thus defrauded of his office retired from
politics, returned to the practice of law,
has since established a large and profitable
business. and IS now so happy and con-
tented that If the chaps who swindled him
at the polls that day were to present them
selves to him IN want, he would stake them
for good dinner, and dismiss them with
his blessing. So you see they do some
funny things here in America at election
times
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01
THEY ALWAYS AGREE.

| DO not always quite agree
With what she may propose
But though It may seem wrong 10 me.
You bet il always goes
| am not one to vex my wife
With endless contradiction,
or ciund the gentle creatures life
By harsh. unkind restriction.
II Emma Jane prefers her club
To staying home at night,
She knows full well her loving hub
VIII tell her It's all right;
And II she hates to have me smUk,
Why. then. ! loath to tease he.
Why should ! any storm evoke!
It's easier TO please her.
And so live In happiness
No iarring or contention;
None of the clashes that distress
Some couples could mention
l don't require her TO obey.
Her will would not break IT
/ always let her have her way
Because / know she'd take IL.
Chicago News.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01
4 LATER ADVENTURE OF PEGASUS.

When Pegasus decline began,
His pinions scarcely 1T to drag on,
The Poet sold him to a man
Who ran a vegetable wagon.
This Huckster, little yersed in Keats
And knowing Horace very sparsely.
Cared less for Byron than for beets
And less for Pindar than for parsley
His wit slow.
His brow was low,
His voice knew not Apollos uses
lin selling leeks
One seldom speaks
The favored measure Of the Muses..
And so the Huckster hitched his steed
Unto his cart and started yelling
His stock in trade, TO meet the need
OF every cook in every dwelling;
But lo each word he tried to bawl
Fell into rhymed extravaganzas
Until at last his Hdckster's call
Became complete poetic stanzas:
Who II buy my corn
This jocund morn?
NV lettuce green tropic parrotsf
My marvellous
Asparagus.
My radishes, my beans and eaTrotsr
So Pegasus with dusty coat
T,,gced tn the sweat ran down his dapples,
And and then tHe hncksttT NIOte
A sonnet on a peck OF apples,
And now and then he raised q cry
S, rhythmically sublimated
That folks remarked. In passing by,
"He's daft or else intoxicated!
Crisp Cauliflower!
Fresh lemons sour!
Canialoupe, spinach. new po-ta toes!
Fresh pease. fresh greens,
Fresh lima beans.
And blood-red, sun-kissed ripe to-may toes
As night drew on the Horse divine
Grew most extremely irritable
And inwardiy began to pine
For oats IN his Parnassian stable
He kicked his master OF the dray,
And snorting like fiery dragon.
Spread out his wings and few away.
Still harnessed to the Hueksters Wagon
MORAL
Though change of heart
And love of Art
May make a poet OF Garter.
The Muses. colt
h APT 70 bolt
when harnesssd Gown 10 trade and batter
-wailace Irwin in the Reader.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01
SHOOTING STARS.
A Remarkable Study.

What did you think of our friends
speech?' asked the veteran statesman
1T was a remarkable literary study"
answered Senator Sorghum. II never be-
fore realized how completely the meaning
of words could be effaced by a judicious
manner of arranging them in sentences"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01
An Assertion Qualified.

Are you In favor of free alcohol for use
In the arts?''
Yes" answered Col. StilweN of Ken
lucky But to be perfectly candid and not
rnislead you, l ought to add that 1 consider
a competent mixer Of beverages an artist"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01
April 1.

You who are coaxing the soil to yield
Food for yourself and bit to spare,
Driving the pillow through the stubborn field,
Thinking this world but life of care;
Turning your gaze from the kindly skies
And the health and rest which attend
your state.
Pause for a moment and lift your eyes
This is the day we celebrated
And you, oh poet, with restless heart
Seeking the beauty OF life alone;
Scoring to do the yeomans part,
To run the furrow or lift the stone,
Join with the others, nor proudly shun
The simple duties which sternly wait
On mortals all. OF the crowd be one
This is the day we celebrate.
And you, OH man of SURPRISING might,
Forcing obedience to your will.
Remember when you have gone from sight
The world VIII be loving and laughing
stu.
Let us Join, with complacent mind.
Peasant and prince and potentate.
Casting assumptions TO the wind
This is the day we ceiebratsi
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01
Unsubstantial Mirth.

Father" said the small boy. what is a
practical Joker"
"A practical Joke, my son, is one Of the
kind that appeals to- a man whose sense of
humor is wholly theoretical"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01

Ii is but natural that old-school diplomats
should question the efficiency OF arbitra-
ton. Professional diplomacy sometimes de-
ponds on the concealment of truths whtcn
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01

Some members Of the House of Represen-
tatives would be glad 10 present Speaker
Cannon with telescope If they thought 1t
would enable him to see them.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01

The classical names given some OF the
race horses have not had any appreciate
Influence IN stimulating scholarship among
tlie men who follow bookmaking as busi-
ness
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01

Wren a coal strike is threatened a brew
cry strike seems an affair of minor signin-
canoe.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01

The Sultan Of Morocco may eventually be
permitted to venture some discreet obser-
vations as to what he thinks of 1t all.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01

The proprieties demand a certain amour.
OF discussion of the elimination of gambling
f. en- the turf. futile as it always proves.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01

Mr. Jerome must occasionally regret that
there is way of Furnishing a judge tor
what technically amounts 10 contempt or
the district attorneys office.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01

The Standard Oil is still busy with inves-
LEGATIONS and consultations.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01

Japan is approaching its railway prob
lens without much hope of enlightenment
on the subject from this country.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01

There is no conference or talk Of arDI-
tTation when the coal operators contem-
plate revising the scale OF prices TO the
public.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01

Justice Deuel. IS anxious to make it clear
that magistrate he has the highest re-
Spect for the law.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01

Senator Knox has the respect for the
courts that is becoming a lawyer of his
reputation.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01

NJ. White possesses a certain advantage
over the czar in being able to resign.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01
wealth's Melancholy.

They say the millionaire Is grim.
In vain for laughs he's wishin'.
We've kept investigating him
And spoiled his disposition.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-04-01

Talk about de automobile displacin de
horser exclaimed Uncle Eben. TT amt
even put de wheel-barrow out o. businessr