davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01
LAUGHED for Salary.

A rich man who thought he vas about
the smartest that ever came down the
pike, was in the habit of getting of inane
stories in the presence Of his clerks and
other hired hands, says Tom McNeal. II
was noticed that one clerk laughed at all
of the old FOOLS stories until he almost fell
off the stool.
One day another man took tho clerk
to one side and said that he would like to
ask a question just for curiosity.
Fire ahead" said the clerk
Well" said the other, II would like
to know just what you saw in that last
story the old man worked on on u.s.
II saw an increase of rs per month In
my salary" replied the clerk.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01
DYNAMITE IN SCHOOL.
Children Discover Explosive Before
Mice Gnaw Way to It,

E.ldora la. Jan. 30--Ten sticks of dyna-
mite and two foils of fuse constitute a
peculiar find made by children who were
pupils in Linn township No. 9 country
school in Marshall county, south of Ell
dora The explosives were found in an
old shoe which was hidden away in some
rubbish behind some old shelving at the
schoolhouse. Mice had been working away
at the box and nearly had gnawcd their
way TO the dynamite 1t is presumed that
burglars selected the school building as a
good place to secret the dangerous stuff.
Had the dynamite exploded during the
schoo, session it would have wrecked the
school house and killed every person in the
Building.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01
THREE SHOT AT LEDoN.
One Man Fatally Wounded in Feuda
FIGHT

ottumwa, Ia, Jan. ao.-1n shooting
affair at Ledon, William, known as Red"
Russell was fatally wounded his brother
Frank shot through the shoulder and
Night Marshal Samuel Grove received a
bullet wound in the head, two in the leg
and one in the hand. Frank Russell and
Grove will recover. The shooting was the
elimination Of feud of long standing be-
tween Grove and Red Russell, who is
an ex-convict and had the reputation OF
being a bad man. About three years ago
Grove fired twice at Russell because he
resisted arrest, but missed
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

4
ms iiietllo", M 'il1i' S"lutl"fl, lhouRh
with indifferent success. There WAS
none. however. which appcaled to mo
lils. his ,,.,p.dv of Jeonala Aa.ir As
it,,u Wy tNiuchee az .ile iiu'isse,
,...., ~ W ~ W - Ns.ui.e VI Miii.n
~ "e 1,'iist .oli,c p,ioit " ,
uii MN, ',''ii1eu more 'iehiis .i!,th
! ii'iu UT uoiie the TOSS M,''ll 'he
NV ps liie lua.il
', IN iio..iies. mole lnI i,
.ipou 1851 ,iil9 ".ialse BUSINESS my"
Nouiu, N -, sur i.aNe Sle.i"'is up
ps"ieu w ,ii'',, ai'" '.is w Wv,
ponce "ollu haNe peei supPiel,ltilt,".
OF more I'roI'ipiS a'l'lSlpa'ea' oS ,he
'ihiteu o''s'si N,',ioii anu .ile aie, iii'i''
u AZ, 'i1e iliSe Iii ,, assii, IN
~ Wy - uio.e ui'on my i".'''u.
c. nv Wv. ~ ..s mint go
Iouliu ~ .Ai.''4",'oi. "iit i,
ny LEN -, .ei', ,,,t.
.Miee-' oiu ,'i'' VIZ ie.a .iie
~, ~ ''s ~ w , Wv, 49,
~. $50, ~ M
-, '' :" - ,,, ~ "ae ~,
nv, ~ " ,i.'s ~ ~
a. ''i', 'i'ttS 'io' " " -
, Aus'iali5al 'o el ltdaii ia'olnal
Hha ~ ,us ~. -
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o.,tIr l,,,an1otfGn5l 80 II was nn",
,j,.tb ,s.,,,5, H., ,1,os.t e,,..,,,,a ANA ,In-
.'y5.,e,.t@]! fo,.,i, n1tyeen IN hours nj.
t.,, af,, eltll,.l,- tl,ir,y OF, Inc riollt Of
Nil,.,.n ~, tS4t
/ ,,cn.,,, Attn ,.,e fon5 OF cards
rJ5,lyin., [e,,,,inually but never tol. sl,, n
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

There is something like a sense of tlia
tragic In the fall of majestic trees. one
has just been cut down near Burgdorf.
in Switzerland. which really deserves TO
be described as u monarch of the for
EST. 1t was an oak. AT a height of
sixteen feet from the ground the trunk
measured not less than four and one
half feet in diameter which gave a
circumference of sixteen feet three
inches. The concentric rings showed
The tree to nave been planted about the
year 1900. OF these rings 81 could be
reunited.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01
Indian Bows Trouble.

wv ssV0OVVs
From tho Kansas City Journal.
Superintendent John Finn OF the Indian
schools Of Chamberlain. 8. D.. has at his
tongues end many quain, stories Of Indian
children.
Anent fatigue he said one day:
IA little redskin. Black Eagle. accom-
panied me on a tramp Of sixteen miles.
1.-The boy walked we'll for his age. but the
last two or three miles went hard with
him. He gave pretty plain evidences OF
fatigue.
'Tired?' said l.
NO he answered. 4 am not tired. but
I'd be glad II I could take OF my legs
and carry them under my arms while :"
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01
Robbed In Church.

Just think what an outrage it is to,
be robbed Of all the benefits of the
services by continuous coughing
throughout the congregation. wkenl
Anti-Gripine is guaranteed TO cnret
Sold everywhere. % cents. +. w. DEE
mer, M. D., Manufactures, Spring,
fold. Mo.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

T Was in the
spring of the
year 1894
that all Lon
don was in
terested. and
the fashion
able world
disnlaycd by
the murder
of the Hon
orable Ron
aid A dair
under most
unusual and
neXplicable
circumstance
es. 'rh e
public has
n l r g a d y
learned those
particulars of
the crime
which came
out In the
police inves-
tigation. but
a good deal
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01
THIRD On THE LIST.
Mcrn;naside G. Sioux City, Will
Compete in state Orator.
icaI Contest.

zeal Conte5t.
Dies aloines, la. Jam. @i.-'The ora
lions chosen for the state oratorlca
contest out OF fifteen are in their order
Us fo.iows
Upper lowa-'.The Nations Martyr"
cornell Robert f. Lee.
MISUNDERSTANDING Crisis of the
Twentieth Century,.
Goethe Power of Character.
Drake .lbe Power of conviction.
Western His Majesty the Citizen.
C'entral-"rhe Zenith of the Earl OF
Shaftsbury.'
Iowa s,ate-9rhe Growing Influence
of Government.
Mornngsde colleges GRAFTON was
written by Arthur e. Cushman. a
freshman, whose home is Morningside.
He is II member of the Othonian Liter
AIRY society. and one of the foremost
orators in the college.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01
SELL M'cuTcHEN LAND.
Real Estate of Former Hosten Banke
on the Block.

FIolstein, Ia, Jan. 3o.-The people of Hol,
stein are much interested in the sale of the
McCutcheon real estate here February g.
Since this includes the bank building. it in
all probability means the staring of an
other bank in the town during the next
few months. Several parties from out OF
town have been investigating and looking
over the property and sizing up the situa-
ton. and many out of towns bids are eX,
pected.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

Pills l was SO weak
l could h ar d ! Y
drag myself across
tine room. l was
wretched and ner-
V us. and had
backache, bearing.
down pnin, head,
ache, dizziness and
weak eyes. Dropsy
set In and bloatlns
of the chest cholled
me and threatened
the heart. | had lit.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

A espondent says that if he cata
eggs in any form he has all the symp-
toms. more or less pronounced. of ir-
litant poisoning. Many persons are al
fected i'll like manner by articles Of
food Some persons cannot eat straw
berries, to others mutton is poison, and
Iiany persons dare not eat crab.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01
Self Deceived.

Chicago Tribune: Il know men,"
averred Uncle Allen Sparks who
think they are earning a living when
all they are dong is beating the world
out of one"
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

Mrs. Schuyler crowninshield, wife of
the admiral has written several stories
and recently made her first effort at a
stage production which deals with the
revolutionary war. 1T was recently
produced in New York and aroused en-,
ihYsiaSln.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

1t is only within century that
naturalization or the oss-breeding Of
I,lants has been practiced. Yet IL
seems TO have been in Lord Bacon's
mind as thing to be achieved, more
rhan 900 years ago.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01
ga ga 80

The enormous crops on our seed farms
the past season compel us to issue this
special catalogue.
SEND THIS NOTICE TO-DAY.
md receive the radishes and the wonder
full Bargain Book free.
Remit &c and we add package of Cos
mos. the most fashionable, serviceabe,
beautiful annual flower
John a. salzer Seed Co., Lock Drawer
C.. La Crosse. Wis.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

|, is a curious fact says the London
Book Monthly. that manuscripts by
women are rarely as clean and tidy as
those prepared by men Most editors
Viii admit in candid if ungallant mo-
tnents-that they would rather tackle
Two manuscripts by men than one in
a hand that should be fairer'
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

\ French botanical explorer has dis
covered in Central America new cof-
ZEE plant. With fruit of superior quality
10 which he has given the name of cof-
fee excelsa. The tree grows wild and
attains a great height. At five years
specimens are twenty-five feet high and
older trees have been discovered that
We're sixty feet high The coffee seeds
are small. rounded. and according To
analysis and expert opinion are among
b.. best sorts known
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

tie hope, but to my untold surprise
Doan's Kidney Pills brought me relief
and saved my life. shall never for
get It,"
Sold by all dealers. 90 cents box
Foster Milburn Co.. Buffalo, n. y.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01
a Dead Beat.

From llarper's Weekly.
The trolley car was crowded. 4 number!
of passengers finding foothold upon the,
running board. 1t haG proceeded quite al
distance before tho conductor could com.
plete his lare-collccting round. Suddenly
Il woman caught hold of his arm and,
cried, eXcitedly:
"conductor! A man has fallen on, the'
carr
II know It. maarn. was the cool re-,
ply. III hadn't got his fare. Some folks!
Will go any length to beat the company.,'
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

An eminent scientist has estimated
that the average mans eyelids open
and shut four million times during the
gear.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

Miss Josephine Northmore, of Lake,
side, Mimi, has genuine tenor voice.
with a range from Il flat to high c.
Any attempt to make her sing soprano
In the same range of contralto has
proved unsuccessful.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01
At the Ball.

From the New York Weekly.
FIRST Artist (adnirngly)-Wh What a.
faultlessly beautiful face Miss Heebie,
has!
Second Artist enthusiastically
indeed. It's as perfect as a retouched.
photograph.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

senator Clark has bought for s1-50-
600 the famous Union mine. El Dorado
county. California. for which the
Standard Oil company offered $3.50 y
900 last spring. Former owners of the
mine lost the vein after taking out
s1.500,O00 in bullion and sold the mine
tor sl,400 The new owners found the
veiI again. and UP To date it has yield
I'd sl2.00o.0 600
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01
Natures Way Is Best.

The function strengthening and tissnei
building plan OF treating chronic. linger
ing and obstinate cases of disease as pur-,
sued by DIR. Pierce. is following after;
Natures plan of restoring health.
He uses natural remedies, that is
extracts from native medicinal roots,
prepared by processes wrought out by
the expenditure of much time and
money. without tho use of alcohol, and
by skillful combination in just the right.
proportions.
Used as ingredients OF DIR. Pierce's
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01
Rich. Juicy Radishes Frsa.

Everybody loves Juicy. tender radishes.,
salzer knows this. hence he offers to send
to keep you in tender radishes all sum-
mer long and his great
sALzERs BARGAIN SEED BOOK.
with its wonderful surprises and great
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

Mrs. iondmsr--Doctor. my daughter
sits and gazes into that mirror for
hours at time. l can't get her to take
exercise!
DIR. Bluff-Well, / prescribe another
mirror at the other end of the room.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

TO CURE A COLD IN ONE DAY
Take LAXATIVE BROMO Qulnine Tablets
Druggists refund money II 1t fails 10 cure.
f. w. Groves signature is OH each box. 25c.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01
A pEsPAlRlNG WOMAN.
weak. Nervous and wretched fro
Wasting kidney Troubles.

Mrs. Henry A. Reamcr, Main and
Garst streets. South Bend, Ind. says:
when | began using Doan's Kidney
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

book Tor both men
and women is DIR. Pierce's
Common Sense Medical Adj
wiser. A splendid 10Os-page
volume, with engravings
and colored plates. A copy,
paper-covered, will be sent
to anyone sending 81 cents
IN one-cent stamps, to pay
the cost Of mailing only, to
DR.. 3. v. Pierce, Buffalo, n.
7. Clsth-bound. u stamina
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

THE ADVENTURE OF THE
EMPTY HOUSE,
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

Robert Marlborough Sherard author
of Twenty Years in Prison" tells that
Guy de Maupassant despised literature
AS profession, and gave to almost
any other topic of conversation the
preference over books There are so
many other things of SO much greater
interest to talk about the novelist
would say. OF yachts and the sea he
could talk delightfully."-. and he was
rather proud of the fact that some time
previously he had rescued from the
waves at Etretat the English poet
Swinburne. who. Byron-like. magnlfi-
cent swimmer, had for once outswun
his strength
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

Wireless telegraphy broke its own
record again when the operators at Co
Ion overheard" the conversation that
took place one evening last month be
tween the stations at Manhattan Beach
and Pensacola, the total distance GOV
erred in the circuit being more than .,
600 miles. This record is all the more
remarkable when it is remembered that
the distance covered by The first trans
atlantic cable was only l.SGo miles.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

Lieutenant General Fock, who recent
ly left Nagoya for Russia. presented a
pair of kid boots TO the priest resi-
dent of the West Honganji temple of
Nagoya. where he had been quartered,
5000 cisarets to the gendarmes and sol
,iers on duty at the temple, 100 ubles
10 he poor in Nagoya. and the furni-
ture of his room he gave to Mr.. rakat;e,
Al interpreter in the French language,
says the Japan Mail.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

The most curious almshouse in Eng
land is st. Mary's hospital at Chiches-
ter. There eight old ladies live actual-l
ly in the church, which is a fine old
building dating from 1850. II was orig
inally a monastery, but when Queen
Elizabeth came to visit there she turned
ii into an almshouse. To endure as long
as almshouses exist. The old ladies'
have two neat little rooms each down
the sides of the main church, with,
windows looking out on the garden.
They have each u coal supply. a kitch5
en range, water and gas. AT one end
of the church is the chapel. where
daily services are held. The choir stalls
are beautifully carved old oak, the origI
1nal seats that the monks used. the
church stands in a quiet little square.
The late Georges Charpentier WAS the
publisher of Zola's works. as well as
-,f those of Daudet, Goncourt and other
eminent French men of letters Loi;e
alad 4 modest contract with Charpen-
tier. but wheE his novel. Il assem-
anoir, made him famous. the publisher
,ore up the contract and made an
other. more favorable to lola. Char
pentiers house was headquarters for
the impressionists us we'll as the reNo-
lutonaries and '.intellectuals." The
eminent publisher walked the streets
of Paris. at the age of So looking young
and in the best of health, only TWO days
before his death
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1906-02-01

+. A japanese scientist named Matsura
las been studying the effects of dis
eases and the varying physical state of
the body upon the growth and thick
ness of the hair. He finds that hair
especially in tine case of persons whose
hair is OF course structure. is so sem
siiive TO bodily condition that it con-
t1ins q veritablc history of the state
of the individual To whom it belongs,
--t.-r tlla period covered by its growth.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1906-04-10
HIGH SCHOOL
DIVIDED

Present Enrollnent go With ~ @
Probable Mark to BE Set for Next
Year-1S0s Graduation Glass Mn.
bers Is or g.
An investigation Of the attendance
records shows that the Grand Forks
High school at the present time Is en-
joying the largest enrolment in the
history of the institution, there being
a total Of two hundred eighty in
attendance, with faculty numbering
eight. Every room in the upper floors
of the High and Central school build
ings is occupied by high schools forms
and next year with an enrolment OF
over three hundred, as is very proba-
Bile, the board OF education will be
confronted by the problem of finding
room for the accommodation of all
students. 1t would seem but a ques-
ton of short time when an addition
to the present high school building
Will be necessary-either that of
vacation of rooms in the Central
school structure adjoining.
According to Miss Jennie Allen,
principal of the high school. the grad
uating class this year will number
twenty-five or twenty-six-abOut the
average number of several years past.
The first class to be graduated from
the Grand Forks high school was in
1886 and this years will therefore be
the twentieth class to complete the
course as prescribed in the local
school. The alumni number in the
neighborhoor of four hundred and are
scattered all over the country.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1906-04-10

has got we'll below the ground drifts
the hard snow will gradually bridge
the hole with layer. which, with very
little help from the seals, keeps the
water in the hole from freezing and
forms the roof Of the air space In
which the seals come to breathe.
These holes may happen anywhere
in the broad expanse Of frozen sea.
The Eskimo takes his snow knife, and,
going to the nearest bank OF hard
snow, cuts out a block about two
feet square, which he places about
three feet to the windward of the
mark. Over this he puts the strip
Of skin which he brought with him in
such manner as to cover; the snow
seat and hang down with enough space
to make a mat for his feet, which
deadens sound as well as melting
warmth. As the seal is almost noise
less when it does come he may miss
1t, either by striking too soon or wait
ing to long. This knowing when to
strike is what makes the accomplished
seal hunter At last he strikes one
swift, strong blow, which drives the
Mrpoon deep into the living seal, a
sharp pull with his left hand unfastens
the line from the button and the har-
poon and soon hauls the seals head
up through the hole. With his right
hand he takes the harpoon stock and
kills the,seal by driving the iron into
its head $
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1906-04-10

story Of q tthrifty, home loving and
semtcultured people, concerning whose
fats history brings us no word. In
these palaces and in many niles Of
canals we may almost read the story
of another Egypt-a people toiling I'M
der the burning sun of the desert.
YEARLY and painfully executing the
commands Of an American Pharaoh.
Coming down to a period less re-
mote and only slightly less interesting.
70 the first page Of modern American
history. Here, In the sixteenth century,
Coronado, the first great American
explorer. swept up the Rio Grande
valley and journeyed as far north as
Kansas. In New Mexico he found
pastoral race dwelling in puebios and
practicing the gentle art of irrigation
as had their forefathers. perhaps as
far back as In the days of Abraham.
Certainly their agriculture methods
were In no wise different from those
which prevailed In the days of the
prophets. Even unto this. day their
grain Is gathered in great willow
baskets. is thrashed by the tramping of
sheep and goats and winnowed by the
winds. Fields which were cultivated
three centuries ago are still producing
crops each year.
Some of these thoughts came to the
Government engineers as they ran
their lines of levels in the valley of
Salt river In Arizona. and it seemed
to them proper task for the greatest
nation on earth to restore once more
the GASES of verdure which the desert
had long obliterated.
During the last quarter of century
crop-producing area of 10000 900
acres. or another State of Massachu-
sets. has been wrested from the
desert. Irrigation canals long enough
to span the earth twice and repre-
senting an outlay OF $90,00O.OO0. have
been built. Every year this area re-
turns a harvest valued at more than
$3.50 100000. and 100000 people dwell
in prosperity and contentment where
only a short time ago the wilderness
reigned.
Uncle Sam is to day the largest
owner of the great American desert, no
doubt because 1t was not considered
worth stealing. For many years the
sentiment has been growing that the
Government should make habitable
this vast empire which is SO great
potentially.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1906-04-10
HOW THE ESKIMO
HUNTS THE SEAL.

-
After three ,yearss spent among the
Eskimos, where they are living in their
true aboriginal state, on the north
part of the east coast of the Hudson
Bay, one must conclude that the most
interesting part of their daily life is
their way of killing the seals, which
provide them with food, clothing, heat
and light from, November to April
inclusive. With the thermometer at
40 or 50 degrees below zero the seals
have to be hunted in, different ways.
We must NOTICE how the Eskimo is
clad and what hunting implements he
has with him. His clothes are made
from hairy deerskin, and consist Of
sort of Jumper" or buttonless coat,
made to slip on over the head, and
which has q close fitting hood. Also,
he has on two pair Of trousers, which
reach to below the knee and are
worn in the same way as the coat.
His mittens are also made of the deer
skin, but in these only the skin from
! the shins or lower part Of the legs of
the deer is used, as It is remarkably
tough, and, Notwithstanding the com
paratiye shortness of the hair, also
very warm. His clothing Is complet-
ed by boots made from sealskin and
Raailv hisInniy hunt;np imn,ament
<is the HARMON which ia = wooden
stock ahont two and half feet long
r. th;s is fastened a niece NJ steal
rod threa.a,phtha If an ;nctrio diam.
ater and ahnmt three .sdet innp which
is worlaa into a Wounded mint at the
frae end an which hv means ~ a cor
rasnondine hole IN +he ton If the shaft
works the HARMON nroner. which is