Smyrna times., 1906-08-08
Some Theories
And a Bear Trap
By C. B. LEWIS
Copyright, 1905, by NJ. NJ. Cunningham =,

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Uncle Peter Scott, farmer on the out
skirts of the village of Hillside, had
lost his good wife, and his daughter
to be fifty years old and finicky, while
she had got to be twenty and was
called one of the incest girls in Adams
county.
Tom Barlow, the youngest of the viii
lage merchants, agreed with all others.
He had driven out to see Jennie on half
a dozen occasions on Sunday after
Moons, and it was whispered around
that a marriage would come of it, The
father had scratched his head and said
nothing, but in his own mind he had
regarded it as good match.
All was going well when an Interrupt
ton suddenly occurred. Mr.. Barlow
dealt in hoes, rakes and shovels as well
as in dry goods and groceries. Uncle
Peter bought a hoe of him and started
into the cOrnfield one morning to make
the dirt fly. The hoe pleased him, the
air was balmy and the corn was knee
high and still growing. He was hum,
ming to himself and wondering how
long before he would lose Jennie when
he pulled over a sod with his hoe and
caught sight of a big fat mole under
meath.
The life or death of that mole had
little to do with the future prosperity
of Adams county, sbut Uncle Peter
jumped in with intent to slaughter He
made three or four blows with the hoe
and finally one tremendous blow The
mole was inundated, but at the same
time the handle of the hoe was broken
and the old man fell forward and
| plowed his nose into the ground. He
the hoe and himself, and he jumped up
and down and used cuss words.
One does not remain mad at himself
very long. He finds some one else to
blame for the whole thing. In this
case Uncle Peter put the calamity on
the shoulders of Mr. Barlow. He had
sold him a hoe handle that was weak
in the back-sOld it with intent to de
| fraud and deceive. Uncle Peter had
sold short tons of hay more than once
but when any one cheated him he look
ed upon it as wrong to all humanity
He was near the roadside fence wher
he massacred the mole, and he hat
just got the dirt out of his mouth after
the fall when a man he knew cam,
driving along In his buggy.
He naturally asked what was the
matter, and the old man cut loose. HI
called the merchant a cheat. fraud ant
swindler and vowed by the whisker
of his ancestors that he would never
never buy aught more of him. III
wanted his words repeated, and the!
were.
When the father went up to tn
house after another hoe and the daugh
ter asked what was the matter he ha
more to say about the merchant an
something particular to say to her. II
made more fuss about that broken no
handle than the county commissioner
had in building bridge over Coos
creek. and he ended off with:
"Now, you gal. listen to me. If tina
swindler ever sets foot on my Ian
ag'in I'll crush him as 1 would a-a-
mouser'
: Jennie argued and protested an
g tried to soothe, but the father was oil
= durate. He told her of the messag
; he had sent to town, and she wrote
few lines of excuse to Mr.. Barlow al
/, sent them by a passing boy. That af
ernoon several persons had sever
> theories to advance to themselves.
: Uncle Peter held to his anger H
!. theory was that Mr.. Barlow wou
drive out in the evening and try to G
speech with Jennie and seek to excu
d his disgraceful conduct in selling f
II % cents a hoe not worth dime.
- Jennie's theory was that the me
q chant would drive out with half a dc
1. en- hoes in his buggy and tell her
ther to take them all, but she fear
the result. The old man was mad
through, and it always took him
i least a week to get over one of his fl
d d Old Mrs Davis. who lived just acre
- the road. heard something about
broken hoe, and her theory was tf
there would be row of some sort a
u that she would be there to hear a
%, to see.
The merchant didn't have any p
Us ticular theory He simply made up
II mind to drive out to Uncle Peters a
IS, tell him to come in and help hims
rs, to hoes rakes and shovels witht
y. y. stint
va Nothing further of moment happeI
during the day. 1t was after sup
when Uncle Peter was milking
brindle COW that he got another
ory It might have worked well
not his daughter observed him half
hour later oiling up the springs o
bear trap that had hung in the barn
the last twenty years. Then she &C
new theory. Her father hoped and
tended that some one should walk
that trap. 1t must be the man '
sold him the deceptive hoe that he
laying for Old Mrs. Davis kept
! eye on the Scott homestead betw