Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-09-19
NOT DEAD NOR HURT
Mr.. sHoNTs HAS A TRYING TINE
ExPLAINMo.

Special Dispatch to The Star.
NEW YORK, September 19.-Theodore
sshonts, president Of the Panama canal
commission, with headquarters in Washing
ton, D. c., and occasional business in New
York city, wishes all the world to know
that he Is not dead. that no serious acci-
dent has befallen him. and that he has no
intention Of leaving this world. II he can
help 1t. for long time to come.
President Shonts came over from Wash
ington yesterday and registered at the
Waldorf-Astoria. Soon afterward he took
a hanson to go down town, and at the cor
ner of 18th street and 9th avenue the wheel
skidded on a car track, the horse fell and
one shaft Of the hanson was broken MT.
Shonts stepped out, hailed another cab. and
got to the offices of the Panama railroad
down town without further mishaps
He had scarcely arrived at the office when
he happened to look at the news ticker. He
was astonished to find his own name COM
ing out Of the little machine. and in few
minutes he had a whole sentence:
Theodore Shonts. president of the Pan
anna canal commission, injured In serious
accident at 18th street and 9Th avenue"
"Golly," said ShontS to himself on his way
back to the hotel. Il hope that isn't taken
seriously"
Dozen Phone Calls.
When he arrived at the Woldorf-Astoria
he found a dozen telephone calls awaiting
him. Several Wall street brokers were anx-
ious to know how seriously he had been
hurt. II he would die as a result, and how
much stocks would be affected.
Shonts had just finished answering the
telephone calls when a newspaper man was
shown in.
DO you care to give out any statement
about your serious accident?' he asked.
Accident" calculated Mr.. Shonts. as he
looked at the reporter in amazement. Then.
after moments silence, he said:
cage"
Il think it wi1l." was the answer.
Excuse me minute"
Wire to Windy City.
Mr.. Shonts sent the following to friends
in the Windy City:
Don't pay any attention to reports. Am
not dead, but living and well enough to
write this message
At first Mr.. Shonts had thought 1t all a
good joke. but when another reporter called
at o'clock last night with anxious queries
as to his chances for recovery, he became
slightly irritated.
will you kindly make statement, Mr..
President, as to the nature and seriousness
of your internal injuries ?" asked the re-
porter when a view of Mr.. Shonts dis
closed no external injuries.
internal injuries!" gasped the commits
sioner. "What-?' Then he stopped
short A look Of anxiety overshadowed his
face and he asked in a tone Of suspense:
Say. young fellow, do you think this
thing will reach Paris. France?'
II think 1t will?" said the reporter.
Excuse me minute" said Mr.. Shonts.
He cabled the following message to his
wife and family In Paris:
PAY no attention to reports. Am not
dead. but living and able to write this
1t was o'clock this morning. The CORR
doris of the Waldorf were as silent as
deserted village street at evening. Tap,
tap, tap" was heard on the door of the
room of President Shonts
YES" said the commissioner, waking
from the sound sleep of a healthy man.
Who's there?"
Another Call.
The knocker thought an attendant had
answered.
I'm reporter. VIII you kindly make a
statement as to the chances for Commits
sioner Shonts' recovery"
The president Of the Panama canal COM
mission sprang out of bed and made for the
door. .....,..f-. -
Yes, I'll make statement" he roared at
the astonished reporter. You go back to
your office and tell them that I'm neither
dead. dying nor injured. And tell them to
tell everybody else. You tell every one
you meet on the way
Then he turned to the bell boy who had
shown the reporter up:
You go down and tell your office to flag
these fellows of, for heavens sake, and
please give me little Sleep
slumbers and the reporter set out to inform
the world