The daily morning journal and courier. [volume] (New Haven, Conn.) 1894-1907, 1906-07-04
ADULTERATED.

Golightly-"I can't see why some men
attend church so regularly" Henpeck
Doesn't the Apostle Paul say, Let
women keep quiet in the church? -
Milwaukee Wisconsin.
BOSS, Abs lookin' fob work" All
right, there's a ton of coal on the side
walk that must be brought up" but,
boss, dat's no work foh a lady, my wife
does washin'. r. Houston Post.
Madam" began the beggar, won't
you help me? I haven't a cent to buy
loaf Of bread for my What?"
exclaimed the economical housekeeper;
where can you buy loaf of bread for
cent? Tell me, and I'll give you a
dime Buffalo Commercial
Frenchman (wandering about London
in a fog)-"England is damnable
country
Englishman (proudIy)-"Its the
greatest country IN the world! The sun
never sets on its possessions =
mo, and it never rises either. -
Translated for Tales from lie Rlre.
Benevolent Old Gentleman (rescuing
one small boy from the pummeling of
| two others)-"What are you hurting
this boy for?"
Because he made so many mistakes
in his arithmetic this morning"
But what business was that Of
yours?"
Why, he let us copy our answers
from his. Translated for Tales from
F1iegende Batter.
Mrs. Madison" How do you like
your new neighbors?" Mrs, Dyer
don't know l haven't tried to borrow
anything yet. Town and Country.
"Will you be my wife, Jane?" Twill
you ask me again John?" Why
Because ia like to look round little
before I give you the direct answer. -
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
DO you think your father would
like me as a son-in-law?" Yes, / be-
lieve he would" "oh, joy! I
Papa and l never agree about any
thing, you know."-Cleyeland Leader.
Guest-"How do you think. can eat
such an unattractive meal as this?
What kind of stuff do you call this,
anyway" Waiter-"That's unadulter-
ated food, sir. Detroit Free Press.
The Maid--"I hope you win not let
my refusal Of your offer orry you.
The Man-"Oh. no; have an option on
a widow with more dollars and less
sense than you have. - Chicago Daily
News.
Yes, I'm going to spend a few weeks
at Kloseman's summer resort.My stom-
ach is all out of order, and need a
rest" We'll, your stomach will get a
good rest there too, know the place, "
Chicago Tribune,
| Mrs. Youngwfe-"I am afraid my
husband is killing himself with work.
Mrs. Odds-"How is that?" Mrs
oungwife-"Why, when we were frs
married he always got home from tn,
office early, and now he is often KEEP
until after ten. Scraps.
Young Dedstuk-"Mlss Hope, here's
new conundrum. Why is a COW witt
only one horn like an unabridged die
tionary? What's your answer t
that?" Miss Dora Hope with ;
dreamy, far-away gaze)-"The answe
is yes '-Chicago Tribune,
Kimball Carrow has the reputation
of being the champion absent-mindet
man of Bedford, Mass. On one oeca
sion he called upon his old friend AM
family physician DIR. r, e. Sawyer
After chat of couple of hours tn
doctor saw him to the door and bad
him good night, saying: "Come again
Family all well, ! suppose?" 'M,
heavens!" exclaimed Mr.. Carrow
''that reminds me Of my errand; m,
wife is in a fit!"-New York Tribune.
"Tom's a fool"
"Why, Margery! l thought you likeC
him."
well, we were sitting on the soft
last night, and he bet me that l could
MT whistle. And l turned to him ant
puckered up my lips TO start, and -
"Well?"
well, he let me whistle" --Clevelant
Leader.