The farmer and mechanic. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 18??-19??, 1906-06-26

ZH e" IT,. #"
@ opened ta-.F uat- .
#d 'aes H-r~ going &. tAsk about
ard then lad te depend lpaa tt-
L@s@l DIP at4 ta.sr fLsat4 Hs. - &
raAt nuca. and perhaps more
Haaeh-r - that a. GENERALLY.
t#9s-a on as follows
-ME dear aE4aE bearers THIS t.At
4.eA E9u #l4 ma asfH.H AeE. t~-
eaa thee ll~ ~ no. E.al, sau.
w I-lhtt. ] dom haaH 5a
@1a 81 IL. but n ut memory serves
nee right IL reads some hAt AFTER .Aa-
maaU.r."
Repeating the text. or uha, Ia. sup
asta "4e the t,Nt. hes ~ .n -
mark
Il DOM know what j am going u
but the Lord has said. though /
DON'T exactly kuo" where the scrip
tarr IS To b. found open thin.
mouth and viii fill it,
Whenever ONE began that WY Thu.
4raFeFs might safely calculate ou
Two hours OBSCURE. Tor. strtua, u
eaE. the Lord kept Milling the open
mouth. But. because tn- preacher re-
reat~d the same Things over tnI over
again. a great many people We're @krT-
ilostl enough 10 @lE that tl. Lord
taaht HaNe anything 10 DO with th-
matter. Nevertheless the preacher
Fought ana said he was speaking a-
the spirit directed. and 1T had - Eu
That way. such preacher generally
had hobbies. ana they roue them every
tlH1e they preached. It made ne dIf-
ference to them what text they used
they would soon drift into the ola
thoughts, and. mounting their hobbio-.
they would ride like Jehu nguratINelE
aHedhln2. COINS over the same ground
ana SAYING the sam, things they had
iIaFerS"d and said Il hundred times
beIore. one OF these old timers" was
81 nouoInauiac upon baptism, judged
f.E In fgl4 -t. ~. "a 49, fL4 aFArt
start to finish. he the text rel4vont or
~iIrelavent. he would talk OF INNER
sion, dipping. and ~plunging. and abuse
those denominations which baptised
by other mode
Thinking they would switch the old
fellow off the "baptlSm' track and
make him preach about something els,
some of the hearers asked him one
day il he would not use as a text the
words, Escape for thy life" He
readily consented, and soon he went
into the church. ~oun the text.
and began as follows:
MY brethren, the Lord had rained
down birthstone and fire on that
wicked city and the angel told Lot to
escape for his life. lie and his two
daughters made good time and got
away all right, but his wife. like some
Of these M~ethOdiStS afOund here, who
are always falling from grace. didn't
20 half way up the hill before she
stopped and looked back, and there
she stuck. Lot and his daughters
didn't stop until they got to the creek
and in they went, head and ears. and
my brethren, so it was that while
Sodom was burning and Lots wife
was turning to a pillar of salt, Lot
and his two daughters, h had
plunged into the water, We're as safe
as spring Lizards, and it stands to
reason that every man. woman and
child. in Sodom might have been saved
ii they had fled to he creek, as Lot
aid. There's nothing k water when
a fire breaks out. And you don't want
amy sprinkling either. but what you
need to cool You off is to be dipped
all over"
And then he went on for two hours
talking Of fire and water, and showing
the great advantage of going in all
over.
Another preacher of that class fully
believed that if a man paid his debts
there was no doubt about his being
able to reach heaven, and, per contra.
there was no possible nance for a
m3n To be saved who did not pay his
debts. That was the most he preached
about, and one text was just as good
as another. Somebody asked him, on
one occasion, to preach from the ext.
"NithOut faith it is impossible to
please o He started off by say
ing. Faith, like paying debts is a
II IlSlIdH NlltIt, anu III IildII w Iio hOO
not have faith and pay his debts can
please God, and he needn't try" And
so the whole sermon. as usual, was
about paying debts.
Another hobby rider of whom l
used to hear. who always abused Ma
sons and Odd Fellows, was asked 10
preach from the text: The voice OF
the turtle is heard in our land"
My BRETHREN" he started off, Il
want you to understand there are two
kinds of turtles. There's the high
land turtle. called the turtle-dove and
another turtle that lives in the water,
and don't even keep company with
frogs and fish. but lies low, keeps
dark, and says nothing. That isn't
the turtle my text refers to, for he's
got no voice. If he knows anything,
like these MasOnS and odd Fellows.
who are sworn to keep their secret,
that water turtle don't talk but. il
YOU happen to be SEEMING in the creek
and one of these water turtles gets
your big toe III his mouth he'll give
YOU the sign of distress and make YOU
howl before he viii let go his grin.
No, brethren. the water turtles voice
is never heard in the land, for like
Alasons and odd Fellows he sneaks
of 10 himself. Some people who
haven't cot any better sense say q
turtle is good to eat; that it's got hog
meat, COW meat lamb meat. chicken
-'+0ON5 toi ny 49, 1880
kind of meat. SO these MdSons and
odd Fellows have every sort OF folks
i'm their lodges. and these other denoIn-
nations are made up. like the meats
In 4 turtle. OF all sorts Of limitations.
But, my brethren. when the voice
Of the true turtle-the turtle-doye-
is heard in the land. YOU may know its
the right doctrine-the voice 81 the
Spirit speaking TO the elect"
| do not claim to have heard either
Of those preachers. but l do claim TO
ave heard many preachers who.
whatever their texts might have been.
generally drifted into the old ruts anu
preached about some special sin. |
used to know a preacher h was
noted for his ~stinginess and lack or
the missionary spirit. He generally
abused the MOrm0ns and made it
specially hot for tobacco and
SNUFF dippers. but would generally
Wind up with a very feeling expert
ence talk which was intended 70 tfaVor
he sermon and put everybody in 4
good humor. During the last perform
aYCA h. ,,~-1 HI ynl Ia,44a no yYgrlF-