The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-04-23
THE LrAaE-K1nN CLUB.
An Address on THE Whyness Of the
Whenceness."

At the last regular saturday hlsLl'
meetings of the Lime-Kiln cluD bL ,J---
or Gardner announced that the 11oll -
Anthony Johnson OF Ale.Del ii -
in the ante-room and wouio uellk -
address on 1.-The Whyness OF "a
Whenceness, and Wouia , 49,
make application for mem DeIsliip =.
The stranger. II was explained, was
called the coIored philosopher OF the
south and many OF MS WISE s@yIi-e9
had been given to the world IN print
Two more kerosene lamps were or
dara5 1i1hted the dogs driven out
from behind the stove, and Samuei
Shin was informed that his bronchldl
cough must either be suppressed or
turned out doors. The reception COM
mittee then proceeded to the ante
room and escorted the orator IN.
HOW A PHILOSOPHERS LOOKS
The Hon. Johnson appeared to be
man about forty years old He was
wide between the eyes, baldheaded ana
his toes turned in. He was a one-story
man, built on the pattern Of a cake or
artificial fce=the same breadth all the
way up and down-and his serious
look showed that he had delved deep
into the mysteries Of life As he made
his bow to the audience he had a
closed umbrella in his left hand. while
his right was laid on his heart. The
impression he made was rather favor
able though Brother Jones whispered
to Shindig Watkins that his entire crop
Of cucumbers last year was stolen by
Just such a man.
He STARTS OFF.
out doahs tonight" suddenly began
the philosopher, "dar' am moonlight.
Why? Why haint It dark as a black
dawg under de woodshed? What am de
moon composed Of? What was it hung
in de heavens for? Whar does l. come
from when 1t comes, an whal' does It
go to when it goes, II de ri 9on am a
good thing why nOt have Il all de time
instead of only half2 If 1t don't amount
to shucks. why have II at all2 DID you
ebber stop to ak yourselves d. se qnes-
tons, or have you sot around on de
fence and taken 10 interest in dc nys-
teries around you?"
While most of the members Of the
club were cOnfessipg to themselves that
they had not attended to the moon bust
ness with any great vigor the speaker
drew a long breath and continued
you wake Up some night out of
sound sleep. All ana quiet. You can't
say what disturbed your slunbers. You
git outer bed. You don't know why you
do, but out you git. You go to de doah
and look UP and down All am as still
as de grave. De ole woman, de chill en-
and de dawgs conrinner to sleep on, but
you put on your clothes ard step out
into de night
You don't know what for nor with
er you am goin', but de fust thing you
know you have walked a mile climbed
ober a fence, selected de biggest water
million in de patch and am on your way
home agin. How does de howness Of de
whiohness come about? Why do sou
eat hat dat million befO' wakin' de
family up? Why didn't you go de oddcr
way an sit on de church Steps instead
Of towards de million patch?"
There were suppressed ordinations
of Yum. yumt" among the old vete-
rams in the audience, but they also
shook their heads in a puzzled way and
whispered to each other that Mr.. john
son was too deep for them.
"A few evenings ago. down in Ala
bama" said the orator, as he got
better hold on the platform with his
toes, Il sOt in my study thinkin things
ODER Not mouse stirred. Not
dawg under de bed sighed. De world
slept OF a sudden I had a feelin' dat
I was bein' taken out of dis sphere and
transported into another. It was
slumberous. pleasant feelin', and I
gave up to It.
After an hour had passed I awoke
was out in de kitchen takin' off my
muddy shoes. A bag lay at my feet
and ] lifted it and emptied its contents
out on de fiOah. Oar was four fat
hens. I cant be suah jest what took
place when / was in de state spoken
Of but it's my belief dat I went up de
alley four blocks, climbed ober a
fence and broke open a white man
hencoop.
"Of co'se had de old woman make
q pot-pie Of de chickens, but will some
of you tell me how de whyness of de
whenceness came about7 Had a po-
Hceman found me wild dat bag on my
shoulder. should I have been held
legally responsible ?"
The consensus OF opinion seemed to
be that he shouldn't. and when the or
ator was satisfied as to this he went
on:
What am Tub? You pass ten thou