The Washington herald., 1906-11-25

pale pink bonboH from the box in her
lap and fixing it with uncertain aim at
the expectant collie on the rug, "have
forgotten how to say nice things"
The bachelor gazed ruefully at his
prize dog, who snapped up the sweet and
wagged his tail for more.
He viii die of sugar-on- -the-heart, he
groaned.
We'll. that's better" declared the
widow, than dying for the want of It"
Besides" went on the bachelar, III
isn't what we've forgotten, but what we
remember that makes us so-er-carefuI:" :"
The widow stopped with a chocolate
peppermint poised in midair and gazed at
the bachelor suspiciously.
What do yOu-remember. Mr.. Trav-
ers?" she inquired, coldly.
What happened the last time we said
them" explained the bachelor. reluctant
". "and what a lot of difficulty We had
proving that we didn't mean EN- WO-
men," he continued apologetically, 'are
like the collie there. They swallow every
thing you tell them, and then look at you
as if they expected more Their appetite
for sweet things is never appeased and
Dnce you begin feeding them sugar plums
they insist that you go on doing it TO the
end Of your days. As for love making
There isn't any love making any
more" interrupted the widow, shaking
her head sadly its a lost art. There S
nothing but Notwithstanding Real love
making went out of fashion with real
buckwheat, and real compilations and
a..
only & cOttOn-backed imitation like near
silk and near diamonds and"
"Oh. we'll" broke in the bachelor, con-
solingly. 'it serves the purpose just as
we'll"
And rattles just as loudly" added the
widow, sarcasdcaIly.
And fills in the blank spaces" agreed
the bachelor, like the summer holidays
and the intermissions between dances and
the pauses in the conversation at dinner
And it has lots OF advantages over the
real thing; it's not so expensive and
doesn't last so long, and when it has lost
its luster and its freshness or there comes
a break in It, you don't particularly mind
Its so safe and comfortable"
And cheap" interpolated the widow
scornfully. It's Ike adulterated coffee or
diluted cream; it hasn't got the natural
flavor It's about as satisfying TO a per-
son plning for real romance as a quick
lunch to person starving for a real din
ner. There aren't any artistic lovers out
side OF books. nowadays. Even you"
"Me?" The bachelor nearly dropped his
cigar on the cOIlie's tail
you have Just finished proposing. I al
ways sit down and wonder what you've
said"
so do T." rejoined the bachelor fer
vently.
And when I've gone all over the whole
conversation. I find that you haven't
really said anything"
And I always believed I said too
much" murmured the bachelor.
You are so deity indefinite" sighed
the widow.
7 try to be careful" explained the
bachelor humbly.
That's it, cried the widow indignant
" It's because men are so careful that
love-making has lost its pith and its
charm. II Romeo had been careful
about what he said TO Juliet we'd never
have had the balcony scene. If Paolo
had been careful what he said to Fran
cesca, or Anthony had been careful
what he told Cleopatra. or Abelard and
Heloise had been careful what they
wrote TO each other
They'd all have lived long and died
happy broke in the bachelor
They would never have lived at aHr'
declared the widow. They would new
hel--. .T-s I'll.
ing away kingdom for a kiss. They
would have gone on. like we do. subsist-
ing on the weak tea OK Irritation and the
gas logs Of imitation love instead Of the
divine fire Love IS like gambling; it's
no fun unless you are willing 10 take
a few big risks. You cant be careful and
enthusiastic at the same time, and Ia
rather be wooed by a nice looking canni- |
bal with a club than by the average Ian
guld. inert male person of the present
day" and the widow tossed a whole
handful Of chocolate almonds on to the
rug and watched the collie gobbIe them
up with great satisfaction.
''Oh. we'll" objected the bachelor Ian
guldly, proposing club fashion wouldn't |
do any good. If that should become pop-
ular the girls would take all the piquancv |
out OF 1t by going around bareheaded and /
holding their pOmpadOurs where the blow
would be sure to fall. It was the pleas /
ure OF the chase that gave clubbing its 1
spice, and the more anxious a maiden was /
10 be married the harder she made it for
the man with the club to catch her.
Inc widow flung a violet bonbon at the
COME with so much energy and reckless
ness that 1t hit him on the nose and sent
him growing of into the corner.
There! exclaimed the bachelor |
you've done itr'
Done-what?" asked the widow.
What the girls always co. Shown him
100 much attention and flung your at
fractions so hagrantly at him that thew
don interest him any more If you'd /
Oeeh a little more coy and less generous
you could have him on his hind knees
begging for favors this minute"
tried TO make him beg first" pleaded 1
the widow with humility. Il gave him
every encouragement"
It's not encouragement we want TO
make the game interesting" retorted the
bachelor. IT'S a Httle-dis-couragem
lou wouldn't Keep on chasing a deer or
bear or foX-if it turned around and
began TO chase you, would you?"
Noe" agreed the widow. but Der
haps if you were a little keener In the
pursuit and little more deft at handling
your weapons and skilled in manipuIaf-i
Ing your nets and enthusiastic about
catching us, It wouldn't be such a tempta-
ton toto"
Help US out and lead US on and hunt
Us down. finished the bachelor promptly.
We have TO-" protested the widow.
You've grown so rusty and awkward
at the game and gotten so out Of prac-
tice that even when you do try to make
love you generally do it at the wrong
time or in the wrong way or to the wrong