davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05
POINTED PARAGRAPHs-
[From the chieago News.1

FROM the chicago news.
Never Judge a girls beauty by her
photo.
Life isn't worth living for those who
think it isn't.
About the easiest way to settle an
argument Is to shut up
Highly colored stories are never in
the white-lie class.
The people who succeed are those
who make use Of each other.
A woman's train of thought is apt ts
run toward her dressmaker.
Many an otherwise honest young
man doesn't hesitate to steal a kiss.
IT'S difficult for a woman to love a
man that no other woman admires.
It is permissible to blow your own
horn II you are a member of a brass
band.
When a man is unable to choose be-
tween two evils he usually hunts up
third.
crops may come and crops may go.
but the forbidden-fruit crop is always
with us
Many a fellow tries to run forty
horse power automobile on a five horse
power salary.
Riches may have wings. but don't
sit down and wait for another mans
riches to fly your way
There never was a pretty girl so
sf4lrtd that she couldn't fool the clev-
crest man Of her acquaintance.
A married man thinks he could have
saved a lot of money had he remained
a bachelor, but he couldn't.
When you see a boy of 10 with
clean face and his hair carefully
oombed it's q safe bet that he Is In
love with his school teacher.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05
KANSAS COMMETT
TILLMAN.S sPEECH.


Have you read Ben Ti1lman's speech
In Chicago. great row was made
over this speech. before its delivery.
we nave read a stenographic report OF
II he says, in effect, that in seven
OF the leading southern states, the ne
groes ousnumber the whites; that un-
ger the law adopted by northern people
tnese negroes would control the south
a1lnough they do not pay q hundredth
part on the taxes, or represent hun
dredth part of the education or intel
llgence Of the south. He argues that
tne whites have always controlled the
piack races, and that the exception IN
TINS case IS because of the quarrel be-
tween the north and the south over
slavery that the northern people them
selves dislike the negroes as much as
90 southern people, and have shown
tnelr dislike IN many ferocious ways;
mat me northern people would do ex-
actiy as The southern people are doing,
unoer like circumstances. He didn't
say, To hell with the law but ITO
nell with such law meaning the
law forming negro equality OF the peo-
PIE OF the south, adopted at a time
When the northern people were wrought
UP because of long war. He says the
old time negroes were all right, that
curing the war, the slaves protected
their mistresses, while the men were
away nghting, but that a new race has
grown up. which is impudent and dam
gerous- The speech is not as bad as II
mas Deen represented, in any particu.
lar.-Atch1son Globe.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05
PREcEPr AND PRACTICE.

EHECEFT AND PRACTICE.
Young men should never smoke It dulls
the mind,
And costs moreover many shekels
bright
The which invested in gold-bearing bonds
Gimme a lightD
WouId bring much profit. Always pay
your debts
With promptness and the confidence of
men
To call againD
And never, never drink. It's poison rank
And he who uses it a stupid lout
To failure all foredoomed. (Say, Jimmy,
boy,
Bring mine withoutD
And as for swearing. oh, the naughty
1ll-bred and wicked to be wholly frank
(Say, why'n the thunder don't you close
that door!
Blank - BlankD
New Orleans Times-Demovrat.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05
Roosevelt and His Book.

President Roosevelt often tells with
relish this story on himself. He visited
a booksellers shop in Idaho just after
he had written his THE Winning of the
West" He picked up q copy of his book
from the counter and sal1 to the book
seller, with feigned curiosity:
who is the acknowledgements
oh" was the answer, hes a ranch
driver up in the cattle country"
What do you think Of his book?"
Well said the dealer. I've always
thought I'd like to meet that author and
tell him If he'd stuck to running ranches
and not tried to write books he'd have
cut a heap bigger figure at his trade
and been bigger man. Boston Her
aid
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

campaign fund. on the ground that the
money belonged to the policyholders
and the insurance magnates had no
right to use it for political purposes.
Mr.. Cortelyou and Treasurer Bliss. says
the dispatch, firmly refused to return
the money, but the president is still
insisting that it must be returned. This
will not weaken the president with the
people. but it may be a trife rough on
Mr.. Cortelyou's budding presidential
forv,,
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Says the Hutchinson News: 1.-The
Chicago Inter-Ocean having eliminated
all the Republican presidential candi-
dates except Speaker Cannon and Vice
President Fairbanks, and the Topeka
State Journal having eliminated these.
the Republicans seem to be up against
1t for a standard bearer next time
whats the matter with drafting some
body? Teddy. for instance.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

The New York World cannot see
how any good can come from Senator
Tilman's incendiary speeches on the
race question But If they keep Till
man in the senate. isn't some good ac-
comp1shed from Tillmans standpoint,
however the rest OF the country may
look Mt 1T
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

1t is something of a disappointment
to learn that a robber who held up a
Pawnee county farmer who had been
marketing is wheat, got only $500. 1t
was supposed that a Kansas farmer
who had marketed his wheat never car
ried less than $500 or $1,000 around with
HI,
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Among the other senators who are not
enthusiastic in praise of LaFollette,
there is Mr.. Dryden, OF New Jersey.
who will probably fail of reelection
this winter as a result Of the Wisconsin
mans VI iii to his state
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

The noise that you did not hear from
Washington on Monday, according to
the Salina Journal was the welcome
his fellow senators were giving LaFol-
Iette. Noticed how cordial it was. didn't
Won
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Since Victor Murdoch has got into the
senatorial race, Uncle Bent is torn be-
tween love for his brilliant red-headed
nephew and his devotion to another
red-headed man who lives at Law
rance
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Mr.. Bryan calls attention to the fact
that the only president who has moved
from Albany to the White House IN
thirty years was Grover Cleveland.
TIE New York governorship. he says,
IS no. a stepping stone to the presi-
dency. If he had said thai before cleo
ton it might have helped Hearst some
People were afraid he might go from
Albany to Washington.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

This coal connscation idea can be
made to work both ways. The officials
Of McCracken caught carload of coal
on a sidetrack there the other day, and
they promptly "confiscated'' Il and dis
1ributed it to suffering people.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05
HUMOR or THE DNY

The Park cop-Come on Git up out av
here! The Tramp dreamily)-Wots de
berths?
this morning and lost my overcoat there.
confound the luck" Briggs-''That's
nothing. Last week I lost whole suit
there. Boston Transcript
Wen. Mary. I'm going to smoke those
knew you would smoke them some time
Il didn't think I ever would, but the doc
tor has Just told me that must not use
tobacco any more"
Did the Judge give hinN long sen
Ten years. wen, You don't cali a
sentence long that has only two words,
do you?'-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
:, What caused the trouble between
a row over an automobile Il didn't
know they owned one" They didn't.
oils News.
celebrating 1,s the Fourth of July last
Ing Il to DO any celebrating this year are
fingers again. can I''-Chicago Tribune.
.oh. what do you call those things you
trying to think of clothes tree What
have arms that stick out like this. and
"Oh. Observation-Disclosures Ledger.
Life is 50 uncertain, she said. 7
know it," he replied, let's get married.
One of us may die within few years.
Chicago Record Herald.
Teacher.N1iss Badger. what do you IN
Coed-The botany classes. They can go
out in the woods once in while.-Chi-
eago Tribune.
Il sec. Katie. that New York is to have
one Ppne3eman 70 every 52l Inhabitants"
I've got mine" was Katie's reply
Yonkers Statesman.
do you enjoy delivering speeches to
your constituents .'Oh, yes' answered
the statesman; only it hurts me to have
only kind of goods / can be relied upon
to deliver. Washington Star
Bacon-she says she is % years old
Egbert-Well. she looks as if she would
say she was about that old.-Yonkers
Statesman
hopes said IInele Eben. may be fool
ish, but he amt as foolish as de one dat
nurses vain regrets. Washington Star
7 suppose a professional pugii.st.~
SAID Jokesley,.. may properly Sc called
a box party. Yes, replied Wlsenan.
Philadelphia Ledger.
1lOW uOSS IL happen asked the port
~ dowager on the overland express,
that you have managed to keep the
same cook for thirty years?'' Il married
one answered the chance acquaintance
Struggling her ample shoulders.-Chicago
Tribune.
Sure Slgn.-Po1fceman-W made
you think that your passenger was a
foreigner? Driver-FIe asked me If
would like n glass of beer, Nobody lot
a foreigner would ask such a stupid
thing as that--Fliegende Blatter.
See here" said the PoDley. Il don't
propose to have that burglar alarm in our
room. Wen rig It up down in the hail.
But. protested his wife we wouldn't
Neither will the baby."-Philadelph
Ledger.
"A woman should always depend on
her husband si 10. for advice, . said the de-
but it does grow monotonous not to get
any advice except to economize. ''-Iva sh-
ingtOn Star.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05
PUBLIC OWNERsHIP.

Bill Allen White. who is always but
ting IN, says this land of the free and
nome OF the brave already has public
ownership" of all the newspapers that
publishers are but hired men, who
print these papers to meet the require
ments OF the sovereign squats If an
editor doesn't print paper that meets
per goes to pot. while the editor ceases
to be- And there is lot of truth in
Wnat Bill Allen. says.-El Dorado Re-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05
Harnesslng . Tiiver.

The railroad dams contrived and
putt to turn the Colorado river back
INTO its course have at last succeeded
after several failures and profuse ex-
pendlture of money, expert skill, and
nard work. The flow into the remark
able Salton sink is checked, and the
very considerable body of water which
mas accumulated in the great depres-
sion, which stretches from United
States territory well down into Mexico,
VIII now evaDorate in the course of
time unless it is further rep1enished.
me lake now covers hundreds of
square miles of desert to depth that
varies from ten to one hundred and
twenty feet. and is feature of the far
southwest that provokes thoughtful
persons TO meditation. Some of them
strongly favor its retention by CO.
operation of the United States and
Mexican governments, on the ground
that 1t has proved exceedingly bene-
hcial to the climate of the whole
southwest of the United States and of
northern Mexico. The rainfall, 1t
seems, has been abundant and bene-
hcent beyond precedent in that region
during the last two years. and crops
have been raised by its help where it
had not been supposed that crops
could be raised without irrigation. The
theory is that the influence of the new
SaIton sea has made 1t possible for the
rain-clouds from the Pacific ocean to
cross the desert. whereas afOretime its
DlaStlng heat used to diSS1pate them,
leaving arid the lands beyond, which
of late have got their share of rain.
This is an interesting theory and will
doubtless get the full investigation
which its Importance merits. A very
stout string Will be tied to the Colo
RADIO river before it is let out of its
course again, but if there is profit in
having part of it maintain a great lake
in the Salton sink instead of running
into the Gulf of California. the diver
dOIIhtlpcG
managed row with safety under COM
petent restriction. The river has
shown what it could do. Perhaps it
was worth doing.=Harper's Weekly.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

or course it Is perfectly legitimate
for Senator Bailey to practice law. but
there Is a serious doubt whether he
ought to represent a corporation which
IS opposed to the people, when the peo-
pie are also paying him to represent
them On second thought, there is no
doubt about it. It's a sure thing that
ne ought not to do it.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Since the editor of the Salina Jour
nal has been running for United States
senator and currying favor with legis-
1ators. that paper has become so en-
shaved to the Hon" habit that it even
aEsaalss Of Hon- W. R Hearst.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Some of the newer cities of the first
class in Kansas are wondering what
all this government by commission"
talk is about, and they are inclined to
resent It. Would 1t not be well to
make the commission plan optional
with all first and second class cities.
allowing those that wish to do so to
Keep the present council system?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

president Roosevelt, cays a dispatch,
come time ago insisted that Mr.. Cortel-
you. then chairman Of the Republican
national committee, should return to
the big insurance companies the money
ihev had contributed to tn Republican
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05
IORRERs

Anthony is getting to be quite a
wholesale point. but you would never
know It from her newspapers any more
than you would other towns that we
might mention Jobbers are always ask
ing for new spaper support, but never
patronlze the newspaper
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05
T7he FIight of Time.

Two darkies snapped mules. One of
them was an old hand at the business,
and in making the trade he represented
his mule to be seven years old.
This was in February A few months
later the other darby began to realize
he had been swindled and that the
beast was fully twelve years old. SO he
went back to tell the swindler he had
lied to him about the animaPs age.
You say" said the other fellow. "dat
when you got de mule in February, he
was seven years old, and now it's June
and he's twelve years oId?"
Yes, I do" was the angry response
'-Well, sab. time sure do hy."-Phi1a-
delphta Ledger
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Some New Mexico politicians are
after the scalp OF Governor Hagerman
Of that territory. charging that he has
dfsorganized the Republican party in
the southwest. Fearful charge, that.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Mars is said to be trying TO signal the
earth. Hang out the busy sign. we
can't bother with Mars while we are
electfng a United States senator
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05
LUCKY.

j. r. Burton is writing a book ex-
posing certain prominent Kansans.
Certain prominent Kansans are to be
congratulated upon their good luck
Lawrence World
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Caruso has been tried and convicted
IN a New York police court He has
been tried and acquitted by the direc-
tors OF the concern he sings for. Take
your choice
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Mr.. Hearst says he viii serve in the
ranks hereafter. He has had advertls-
ing enough for awhile, and serving IN
the ranks is cheaper than running for
once
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05
A CHAPTER TO BE CLOSED.
DANGEROUS ANARCHIsM.

Paterson, N j., Is agaln heId up 20
sibiv she deserves it. But the anarch-
Ism of Paterson, N. J.. is not SO danger
Gus as the anarchisEn of citizen of
New Bedford. Mass, who was heard to
exult the other day on the prospect OF
Getting five dollars for his vote at the
Coming municipal election.-New Bed
ford Evening Standard.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

The weather man is doing a good job
of It now, anyway.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

President Roosevelt seems to be as
greatly pleased with the Panama canal
as II he had dug 1t himself.-Toledo
Blade.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Pretty soon now the Tillman proDlelH
will be greater than the negro pro-
blem.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Now the sugar trust has been con-
victed of accepting rebates These
trusts certainly are a guilty lot--Pitts-
burg Gazette-Times-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05
WIDOWS UNION Will OBJECT.

A Massachusetts, club woman de-
clares the law should prohibit women
from marrying more than once
Houston Post.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

DO you enjoy delivering speeches to
your constituents" oh. yes" answered
the statesman; only it hurts me to have
some of them say that speeches are the
only kind of goods / can be relied upon
to deliver. ashington Star.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Il see Katie, that New York is to have
one policeman to every 81 inhabitants"
said the lady of the house We'll ma am,
I've got mine" was Katie's reply
Yonkers Statesman
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Teacher Miss Badger. what do you IN
derstand by the privileged classes p
Coed-The botany classes. They can go
out in the woods once in a while.-Chi-
cago Tribune.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

ssDe man dat nurses unrzasonaf1
hopes" said Uncle Eben. may be fool
ish, but he amt as foolish as de one dat
nurses vain regrets. Washington Star.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Life is SO uncertain she said. II
know it, he replied, let's get married.
One of may die within a few years.
Chicago Record-Herald.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Johnny didn't you lose two fingers
celebrating the Fourth of July last
year," You betr' Then you are not GO
ing to do any celebrating this year. are
your You bet I am! / can't lose them
fingers again. can I''-Chicago Tribune.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Bacon-She says she is Is years old
Egbert-Well. she looks as If she would
say she was about that old.-Yonkers
Statesman
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Oh, what do you call those things you
hang clothes on?' said Dumley, who was
trying to think of CLOTHES tree" What
things? asked Jiggins. why, they
have arms that stick out like this and
Oh, dudes!''-Philadelph Ledger.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

What caused the trouble between
Blinkers and his wife2'' They got into
row over an automobile" 4 didn't
know they owned one They didn't
oils News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Did the judge give himN long SEN
tence2" No. Z thought he said
Ten years well, you don't call a
sentence long that has only two words,
do you?'-Cleveland Plain Dealer
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Wen. Mary. I'm going to smoke those
cigars you gave me last Christmas Il
knew you would smoke them some time
I didn't think I ever would, but the doc
tor has just told me that 1 must not use
tobacco any more"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

The Park Cop-Come oni Git up out av
herei The Tramp fdreamily)-Wot de
matter, porter? Coin ter make up de
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Il suppose a professional pugiltst. 8
said Jokesley, may properly be called
a box party. " Yes" replied WIser1an.
'.pugiIists don't do much but talk. -
Philadelphia Ledger.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

A Sure Slgn.-Policeman-W What made
you think that your passenger was a
foreigner? Driver-He asked me II I
would like glass of beerl Nobody Let
a foreigner would ask me such stupid
thing as that.-Fliegende Blatter.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

How does it happen asked the port
~ dowager on the overland express.
that you have managed to keep the
same cook for thirty years?" Il married
one, answered the chance acquaintance
Struggling her ample shoulders. Chicago
Tribune.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-05

Griggs-"Dropped into the court house
this morning and lost my overcoat there.
confound the luck" Briggs-''That' S
nothing. Last week I lost a whole suit
there Boston Transcript.
Gainesville daily sun. (Gainesville, Fla.) 190?-1938, 1906-12-01
ARYssINlAN APES.
they Have chiefs. Guards aud Sea-
tries when on the March.

They Have chiefs, Guards aud Sea-
tries when on the March.
Very similar reports are made from
different parts OF north Africa in re-
gard to the monkey tribes that occupy
that continent from Morocco to Abys-
sinla. Just how far tribal relations
may have tended to vary the species is
a question quite as important as that
OF language, Some points of interest
are found in an English book, "A Visit
to AbyssInia," Says our author:
Il have mentioned that large num-
bers Of monkeys frequent these hills.
They move about in organized bands,
and their proceedings are arranged IN
the most orderly and tactical manner.
They are difficult to approach unless II
Is gradually and cautiously done, but
mounted on a camel have succeeded
In getting within q few yards of them
when they were crossing the path
ahead OF me. about fifty in single Ole
following their leader and looking with
their names like small lions,
Their movements are full Of inter
est and we'll repay observation. They
have chiefs, sentries and advanced and
rear guards on the march, The moth
ers carry their children on their backs
exactly like the larger human creatures
In these countries, They talk aud chat
ter. the females being especially To-
QuacOus, Quarrelsome and combstlve,
These are clearly under the command
Of the elder males, whose gesture alone
is sufficient to reduce them TO obedl-
ence, They live In small cayerns
among the hills, but will most certain
ly avoid a direct return TO their haunts
II followed.
"They are less tlmld Of men when
these are mounted on camels than
when ON foot, experience having doubt.
less taught them that the former Is
usually travelling to destination and
that his steady, jogging pace Is rarely
interrupted by his curiosity. On one
occasion seeing whole family tribe
on the road home after foraging ex-
cursIon, successfully tempted some
OF the younger ones to leave their
ranks by quietly rolling pieces Of bread
and sugar at them, but the older mem
bers were above such weakness and
went on In n stately way up the hill,
disappearing over the ledge and re-
proving the youngsters as they retired"