davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10
JOURNAL ENTRIES

Leavenworth is wearing its lid, but
it is wearing it tilted over one ear.
You know what that indicates.
Now that the president has simpli-
fed spelling, If he will also simplify
arithmetic he will confer a great favor
on the women who keep household
accounts.
While the message was highly inter-
esting, Of course. this department is
not holding its breath while waiting
for the next installment. which will
tell the story of the canal.
A man has been indicted for bribery
in Pittsburg. The rest of the country
will be surprised to learn that Pitts
burg considers bribery a crime.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10
HUMOR or THE DAY

say woodby-Soi yes, I do considerable
writing for the papers, Ascum-'I !.c never
I have several pen names that I use;
usually Constant Reader or Pro Bono
Publico' or Old Subscriber ''-Philadel-
Don't you hear me?" whispered the
spirituaHstic medium to the little man.
Il tell you it's the spirit of your dead
wife. Why don't you speak to her?"
"Ohi if it's really her" he replied,
she'll do all the talking. wouldn't dare
speak without her permission. '-Philadel-
phia Press.
Hic11s-Of course, the scheme is a good
one. but DO you think your wife viii APP
Wicks-Yes. If by careful limiting I can
get her to formulate it herself and make
her believe It's her own.-Philadelphia
Ledger.
she.'@would you rather walk or ride
there2 He-"Well, I've been out in the
I'd rather ride for a change. 't-sPsiclc. 5
You needn't be afraid. my friend. the
Why, it isn't fireproof, is it,"
NO; it isn't fireproof.
Then why do you say it viii not
because there is no insurance on it,
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Has your, wealth brought you happi-
ness?' asked the philosopher. PERHAPS
not answered Mr.. Dustin Stax: but il
has at least stood between me and a lot
of annoyances. ''-Washington Star.
First Author-"oh. the unutterable mo-
nOtony of existencei am Thoroughly dis
gusted with 1t all Would that l might
Author-''Then why don't you marry a
famous woman?'-Judge.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10
QUAKER REFLECTIONS.

From the Philadelphia Record.1
The school of experience is always a
pay school.
The mails are sometimes late, but
not so often as the females.
The chemist may not be quick at
repartee in spite of his retorts.
There seems to be quite a difference
between the higher life and the high
living.
Clothes may not make the man, but
that Is no reason why a man shouldn't
wear them.
Marriage" remarks the Cynical
Bachelor, sis often excha angling single
blessedness for double misery
Ask a woman what she is thinking
about and nine times out of ten. if she
tells the truth. 1t is about herself
When the green-eyed monster begins
to haunt a man, he should either curb
his jealousy or stop drinking.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10
REFLECTIONS OF a BACHELOR.
[From the New YORK Press.1

It's awful unlucky to kiss a girl on
the sly when her father Is looking.
It gives a man standing to have a
pocketboolx, even If there is nothing in
it.
When a mans daughter is engaged he
can't 60 into the parlor even to hunt for
an old pipe.
It's mighty inconsistent for men to
blame women for not understanding
politics when nobody does.
Even If you only knew one way, a wo-
man expects you to tell her you love her
forty thousand different ways.
Hardly anybody Is so sure of heaven
that he starts for there with the same
enthusiasm he has for going fishing
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10
Making the ohio NavigabIe.

The Ohio river will be made navi-
gable even If it takes IS dams and
locks to do it, said the Z. S. govern
ment. That was about a generation
ago, and much higglfng by the differ
ent sections of the country affected by
the suggested improvements has re-
suited in seriously hampering the pur
pose of congress, according to ]. r.
Schmidt, who tells about Making the
Ohio Navigable'' in the Technical
World Magazine for December. But
the appropriation by congress OF over
a million dollars for the construction
Of one dam alone, the Fernbank dam
near Cincinnati, finally gave definite
shape to the work of making the river
navigable for 1900 miles. The work
on this dam is about half-done, and
five other dams are partially complet-
ed. The Importance and national
character of this work may be bet
ter understood when 1t is known that
Pittsburg coal shipped down the Ohio
last year was destined for Japan, to
be used by the Mikado's fleet in it's
fight against Russia. The Ohio is the
natural highway of commerce from
the east to the middle west but has
heretofore been navigable for only four
months in the year. When the Fern
bank dam is completed, the river will
be navigable as far down as Cincin-
natl all the year round. With the i'm
proved river it is estimated that the
cost of transportation will be reduced
about One-half.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

General Moody on the United states
supreme bench because Massachusetts,
already has a supreme judge. But Is
there really any law prohibiting one
state from having two judges? The
people Of this country are more inter-
ested in whether Mr. Moody will make
a good Judge than they are in what
state he comes from.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10
MENTAL RESERVATION.

The Wichita Eagle calls attention to
the fact that when Ben TilIman took
an oath as a United States senator to
support the constitution. he probably
made a mental reservation as to the
fifteenth amendment. Probably the
same as Mayor Ross Findley, of Wich-
tia, made a mental reservation of the
prohibition amendment when he took
an oath as mayor ef Wichita to support
the constitution OF the state of Kan
sas.-Parsons Sun,
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

II Mr.. Ledbetter. who poses as a con-
gtitutional lawyer in the Oklahoma
constitutional convention, thinks the
United States constitution is not the
supreme law of the land. Mr.. Ledbetter
learn a few things.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

Hereafter If you do not wish to be
asked to contribute to a campaign, just
incorporate yourself Mr.. Roosevelt
proposes to make 1t unlawful for a
corporation to contribute. but while
you remain a private individual you
can dig UP all the campaign money you
want to
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

Congress has been in session a week
and the chief business the United
States senate has transacted thus far
has been to direct two slaps in the
presidents direction.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

The Leavenworth Times comedies
that it costs more to live these days
than formerly, but it says 1t is worth
the price And that, too. in face of the
prospect that the saloons may be closed
in I.eavenWorth
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

Another reason why Mr.. Roosevelt
did not include his remarks concerning
the canal in his message last week is
because he considers it a very i'm
portant subject and worthy of a whole
chapter by itself.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

Speaking Of the banquet which To-
peka held to celebrate her birthday.
Leavenworth intimates that it was an
"orgy." but leaves it to Wichita to
make the direct charge
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

The Louisville Courier-Journal says
the latest airshfp is "19O feet long and
resembles Kansas ear of corn Some
thing like a Kansas ''nubbin." suggests
Fred Trfgg
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

Incidentally it is doubtful if any mes
sage ever written by any president ever
provoked so much discussion as the one
that Theodore Roosevelt has just pro-
roulrya ted
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

Judge Peters Of Newton, positively
refuses to vote for the confirmation of
James Rudolph Garfield as secretary Of
the interior. And Judge Peters was
not in the Kansas state senate when It
demanded that the president fire Mr.
GARFIELD
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

The new football rules do not
amount to much. in the opinion OF r.
a. Cordry. because only two men less
were killed this season than last. Still.
II EIr. Cordrx were one of the two men
whose lives were saved by the new
rules he might think the new rules
amount to considerable. It all depends
on the point Of view.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10
JEFF TO BLAME.

The Pos charges that ex-President
of the Confederacy Jefferson Davis is
responsible for the existence of Leav-
enworth. 1t would seem to the aver
age man that old JEFF had enough to
rest under without this late serious
charge.-Hcltcn Recorder.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

The harassing of Roosevelt by the
interests has already commenced, but
the interests" are a little leery about
beginning the hazing of LaF'Oilette.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

If Japan does conclude to box our
Ears it will be rather difficult for her
to float war bonds in Russia.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

Three oficials who had q hand in
wrecking the Milwaukee Avenue bank
in Chicago have been sent to prison.
Chicago does some things right, any
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10
TWO BIC I0RS

AS we understand it. the two impor-
tant things before the present con-
gress will be the hazing of LaFo1lette
and the snubbing of Roosevelt by 1.-THE
interests. ''-Burlington Chronicle.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

It is suggested in London that the
names of the days of the week be
changed. All right Which one shall
we name after ROOSEVELT
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

newspaper. Why did the Hearst papers
overlook an opportunity Of this kind?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

The japanese say they like the pres
dents message but have they really
read it? Just think how the entire
message would look printed in Japa-
nese
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

Somebody has counted the words in
the presidents message and has dis
covered there are $4,000 of them.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

Up to date that intention to haze
Senator La Toilette appears to have
been delayed in transmission.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

There are some murmurings among
the grandstanders against increasing
the salaries OF the supreme court jus
tees. but it is not Of a nature that
ought to have any influence Among
she others who ought to have a square
deal this winter are those who work
Tor the state at a financial sacrifice.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

Since too much prosperity has caused
the car famine. the Parsons Sun sug-
gests that Mr.. Bryans prophecy of the
coming OF woe. want and misery has
been fulfilled. It sure has. The grain
shipper is filled with woe. the cattle
man wants some cars. and there is
misery because of a lack of coal
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

The Shah of Persia is dead or dying
There are going to be a lot of widows
over IN Persia one Of these days.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10
nor NErrECsARII

Colorado, Wyoming and New Mex
leo have no end of coal under and
around them, yet many places there
are threatened with q fuel famine 1t
seems to be their own fault.-Boston
Transcript.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10
HON. WouLD ~ nO2

San Francisco complains because
the rest of the United States declines
to look at the Japanese through her
glasses. In case there should be
war, what would San Francisco think
of the proposition to allow California
to fight the Japs unasslsted ?-Hutch-
inson News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10
BELATED PRECAUTTON.

Further testimony concerning the
land operations out west suggests that
If there is any public land left 1t
should be locked up during the night
time.-Pittsburg Dispatch.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10
FpOM OTHER PENS
BROKEN TIMETABLES.

The tragic death of Samuel Spencer.
president of the Southern railway, in
the wreck OF Thursday morning. should
serve as a terrible warning to the Of
flcials of his and other Southern rail-
roads. That the country has lost one
Of its sanest and most Woodworking
railway executives everyone will con-
cede Mr. Spencer rose from the ranks
because of his industry and his ability
to think clearly on railway questions.
He was able. moreover. to look far
into the future. and was one of the
first to, recognize the south'S Industrial
possibilities. Yet the comparative
suddenness with which its prosperity
came really swamped his railroad, as
it has many others. Not even his prac-
teal exDerfence could insure a we'll
run railroad Whether this was be-
cause of his own limitations, or be-
cause he was more absorbed in Ques-
lions Of policy and finance, this is not
the time to consider. The tragic fact
death was caused by one of those need
les; and inexcusa Bile accidents about
which the southern press has of late
been complaining with deep feeling
More than that. the constant delays
on the southern railroads have be-
come so grave a menace to L orderly
conduct of business, and therefore the
prosperity of the south, that in Georgia
a Systematic campaign of criticism has
been carried on for months past, with
tho management of Mr. Spencer's rail-
wav particularly under fire. It is sig
rifcant to observe therefore, that Mr.
Spencer's death would not have oc-
Cured If both the trains wrecked had
not been hours behind their schedule.
AS now explained, the fault lay with
the operator of a block signal station,
but that not much reliance was placed
upon the block operators appears from
the fact that a brakeman was hastily
sent back to flag the oncoming train.
Moreover, if railway persistently
breaks it's own rules. If its schedules
are in a state of chronic demoraliza-
ton, its own employees are little to be
blamed If they become lax in their
own duties.-New York Evening Post.
E<EMPLAR OF CIVIC HONOR.
Tax lodging New York. which in
cludes the wealthy part of it pretty
comprehensive will be greatly
shocked and Disguised over the action
of 1-Mayor Seth Low, in paying over
to the city treasury $27,397 in back
taxes. The act IS entirely voluntary on
DR.. Lows part. and that is what will
make It so inexplicable to the high
financiers and others who even go so
far as to maintain more or less unreal
residences out of the city In order to
dodge tax claims. The wealthy ex-
mayor finds that he had been deduct
ing a certain mortgage on property be-
longing to him which he has since
learned could not legally be deducted.
1t Is a fine exhibition of civic spirit
which he shows, and is made where 1t
Is most needed-Springhel Repubn-
can.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

Wuns HENRY beamus sedd in afftur years
we may look back throo eyes that's ful uf
ann think Nv oaiden times wenn we were
ann hardly moo watt trubble ment at awl
ann HENRY sedd sumtimes kloase ure
too sea the burds ann blossums ann the
skize
Nv oaIden daze ann kahn almoast here
the mewslck Nv the forrust in ure ere
the plaise luvd JUST w it yoostoo be.
thare is the crick ware u wood slit and
the mudd OF ov ure feet ann maybee
wild grapevine soze ure muther duzzent
hoo thinks ure JUST uz purfeckt uz kan
witch kumfurts hur a lott. ann thares
the rode
up from the meddoze ware thay hawl a
lode
Nv hay 50 fresh ann swete. ann thares
u yoostoo hunt fore hours ann wunder
ure goen to bee sunday wenn are
ann hafrtoo maik ure nven awl aloan.
ann hennry beamus sedd perhaps sum
wenn awl Nv uss are grone ann gone
weel sit ann wunder ware is reddy brown
ann Wot heez dozen now ann If the town
ware we awl yoostoo live is jusst the
ur if Perhaps weeI sea another naim
aDuv the butcher shopp. ann hennry sedd
preetnes thare mann hoo has a sole so
dedd
he neavur thinks w the old daze ann size
ann LOOKS back thare with longen in his
j. w. Foley in New York Times.
A Woman Who Heads Expeditions.
In her account of her mountaiu-clin1b-
ing in the Andes Miss AnnAes Peck mar
rates some dramatic incidents and mar
row escapes in climbing Mount Huas-
caran:
Our progress was slow, as the way
was sleeper and more difficult Sud
denly, in crossing a gully, our leader
Shpped and slid rapidly down as far as
the rope allowed, dropping hts ice-axe
by the way instead of using it to stop
himself; so it depended solely on me.
Luckily I now had on climbing-irons
and was holding the rope tight. When
the pun came, much to my delight it
was not so strong as I expected and 1
had no difficulty in retaining my posi-
ton and stopping his downward career.
E. readily regained his feet and his ice
axe, and we continued on our way.
Again x. refused to proceed with the
rope or to carry the camera. I called
him a coward, and all / could in Span
ish, to no avail. He did not propose TO
be killed, If we We're: he would hold the
rope in his hand Yes, and drop 1t If we
both slipped. No indeed, said I. 1t was
all or none. I took the camera, coiled
up the extra rope, and went on with
e. alone. Presently perceived x. fol-
lowing. He overlook US, half apologized
for his conduct, said he would take the
camera and put on the rope, but what
would l give him? I considered the
twenty soles promised far more than he
deserved, but at length agreed to give
thirty if we reached the big rock. 1t
seemed near, but with the necessary
windings and our delays, at half past
one 1t might take another hour to ar
rive Fearing that the Indians would
depart leaving the tents, etc, on the
snow, If we did not return by three, 1 re-
luctantly gave the word to halt
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10
IN HIGH PRICE TIMES.

A Memphis man committed suicide
because he was $40 short in his ac-
counts after two weeks of married
life. What did the young man expect
after two weeks of married life ?-Sa-
lima Journal.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10
FIRsT RLoOD ZOE JOE.

Charley Curtis and Joe Bristow III
ed on the same room at the Copeland
to be used as headquarters. Charley
gave it out that he had it, and adver-
tised the fact that it was the lucky
room of the Burton Baker-Long fights.
But just as the hats of his friends
came down, along came Joe and took
the room. There may be nothing in
luck, but this seems to be the first
blood for the long-legged rooster from
Salina.-Emporia Gazette.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

The Newton Kansan strenuously OBJ
Sacts to the appointment OF Attorney
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10
KANSAS COAAENT
FORGIv1NG sTuRBs.

It Is announced that Walter Roscoe
Stubs will introduce an anti-pass
two-cent-fare bill at the coming ses-
sion Of the legislature. It will be re-
membered that it was very largely
through the influence of Speaker
Stubs that the bill was sidetracked
last session, but this will be forgiven
If he gets through the kind of bill
the people want and need. The peo-
pie want legislation that will keep the
railroads entirely out of politics. They
can then hope to do something to-
wards equalizing rates-and not until
then Tho people do not complain be-
cause the railroads make money, but
CT the unfair way in which they dis
criminate against the small shippers
IN favor of the larger ones, thereby
eliminating competition The anti
pass measure is the first step to be
taken, and the measure should be suf-
hciently stringent and easy of enforce
ment that 1t will serve the purpose ex-
pected Of it. and not be a dead letter
on the statutes, as are most laws in
tended to remedy railroad conditions.
The railroad idea of law seems to be
that if 1t is for the railroad it should be
enforced, and If against it should be ig-
nored.-Osago Chronicle.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-12-10

E'ULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIA TED sRFsSS
Der Deutsche correspondent. [volume] (Baltimore, Md.) 1841-1918, 1906-02-03

lcbwnng oobin Qcbrodt mer0cL oob
lie Den Iobuf&QeuIB mtcrldBt.
Cob Oo@ WcitG i'm Scnot Die brittle
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por0cltriNen Nbitinmum0 Ill ihlieBcu,
10 gut mic iidcr, Gas llntcrbal,3
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Mcn0c Scr NiirQcr ihCitcrm neil lie
Gin NnAriii omi Die pcri5nlihc Nrci.
hCit iinN2
Der Deutsche correspondent. [volume] (Baltimore, Md.) 1841-1918, 1906-02-03
&crmildD:c gin5cigcn.
&6niglidlcs GunicrUatOrinm Der
Wniif in Yripli0.

Sic @tiunhmesEriltunG iiloel on ocn IuNctl
Mitnupd NM 2onncritua, nel -. II! ~. Yprtl
pcrfdtliNe |tnIIc nuFN 81 oieicr Brll1ttl9 bat
an Gictitua. Oelt II. "tprll int NIyc0u pes
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tier mo ltrd.ldc .~ltllitI, lOtule 1tllttgtihtcDle
uIo GGcoriC.
BroipcItc in ocl;tiDcr mo claliihcr Sgrude
lpetbCH ulclltQcliltdl alia0CucuCIt.
y~ctp}iA. fallur 1906.
Sne Sircftorimm bc1 GuuiniidcH Gunicruntus
rium Der Wtuitt.
$50 Or. MJutidI.
Der Deutsche correspondent. [volume] (Baltimore, Md.) 1841-1918, 1906-02-03
&criammluuas Mu5cigcn.

rsnecmurn mmcg>pGbrenpc Snu. NM Spcr'
RctCii III. t."
Sic [nbrcer &crtnmmtuia mo NcnIliclIpdbl
nbiGcn ~IicrCjl2 liH0ct Wiuntaa, ocu !, Sclr.
I'M &ereiua-YclGlC. 9r. 1IOG. I'll FrUttt@iruBc,
Htbcuoa bon Z Ute 9 ltby italt. &nt g~lltiraec
t3l ~ /. yu5ic, Scitctal.
Der Deutsche correspondent. [volume] (Baltimore, Md.) 1841-1918, 1906-02-03
Siecnj : IpplifatiOncn.
SpiritnuIen 2iecn5 : Mpplifatiomcu.
liitc Mr.. ~.
Siircau scr NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. Gummiii1 re,
Simmer BOG, Wcrid1t9gcbduoe.
Nllcu y. ouiparb, KralioeHt,
SernGro &icirniclo,
Gnwurb :. Sraeep,
SnuriHSve

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inr SrnIeferirnlg einer 0noctatts Spiritnaiers
stcen5 pom |. U|dl l9oo uft tllI9erel0t olc aln
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nlil'cH eof ~ u0t "lliuH2 an AoHtetltuH ntH
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ioniEti penn aenitl,mIs "H' SF''~sh III ''e'
lciE |itrtall ct,dligt mctoCii. o,,t r,..,
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linu9 Sleottla az Gu'gGtt,S ~, d.
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submit SHHl. 4" OF Su't.'''
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Der Deutsche correspondent. [volume] (Baltimore, Md.) 1841-1918, 1906-02-03
Nnhnnnn Mnhl.

GS ilnrb am /. 6cbriar 1896 iau lunNcrcm
Ecinel Srnu 3phanna gSnbI, Satin Ocs Der
ltotbenc;l @rll. Satpb 9Subi, i'm 81. Eebcltez
Sic ECcrbtgull9 rufOet Suuntaa, 9tddDa
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ion. :. g., 3etlllgeIl poilet sell. topircn.)
(13-11