Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1906-02-11
CONGRESSIONAL SIDE SHOW.

joiner but the fact remains that he never
was Incidentally It wasn't his fault. Whis-
kers grow not for the asking. and the Hon.
orabie Bourhe prayed. BARRIERS rayed and
swore. creams. ungents and ointments
ceaxed but poor return. the cleaning razor
rusted and rested on the shelf. But it was
not to be. The Honorable Bourke sobbed
and the negligent eyegiass dropped It's head.
Populism was out OF his reach.
Ladies and gentlemen. the Honorable
Bourke Is an eloquent man and impromptu
speeches are his forte. Just let him know
q couple Of days In advance and he wili
rise In his place at the appointed time and
| hand out an impromptu speech that can
not be told from the real thing.
Ladies and gentlemen. will picture to
you scene. It's OF an afternoon and the
House is in session. Important public
business is before the rouse and the men,
bers are discussing 1t in the. seclusion of
their cloak rooms. Some are smoking and
some are eating apples. All appear frauti-
caIly interested.
High on the dais of destiny the Speaker
dozes Internationally. frownfng with fur
rowed brow as the memory of a misplaced
flush flashes across his mind All is peace.
All is quiet
Ladies' and gentlemen. the Hon. Bourke
arises. Every move a picture, every pose
JOY. Negligent the eyeglass, superb the
attitude
Ladies and gentlemen, the Honorable
Bourke is about to speak. Back throng
his appie-eating. understanding col
leagues. The floor Is crowded. There Is
jostling In the aisles.
Ladies and gentlemen, It's the tariff that
Is under discussion. although that matters
not. The Honorable Bourke will invest 1t
with interest. In moment no man alive
will be able to name. the subject under
discussion.
A Sheep Bleats.
The ITnpora l,ia rlaurka bautpo He
tackled the wool schedule. His voice rolls
close TO the ear drums. The words and
music of his siren song paint a picture
for his colleagues. IT'S a pastoral he
would have them see and they view 1t with
longing eyes. Over the rural landscape
a summer sun is shining, the laden bees
drone their lazy homeward flight. vagrant
breeze signs through the pendant green.
Kind-faced old cows stand knee-deep In
meadow grass. chewing like thunder. and
on the willing ear tinkles the silvery muir
muir of a hidden brook. A sheep beats in
the foreground. Note the relevancy of the
sheep and the bleat.
A rear of applause shakes the chamber.
Great" cry the colleagues of the Honor
able Bourke. And it is great. 1t has moth
ing to do with the tariff, but 1t is great,
just the same. The wool schedules fall
fainting at his feet
The Honorable Bourke tackles leather
and hides. Every move picture! Every
pose joy! Negligent the eyeglass; superb
the attitude. Another picture is in the build
ing. Wide and rolling is the meadowland:
sweet the perfume of the white clover and
the red; warm the sun upon the fertile earth.
Picturesque the ranch house home on hill
side Struggled, the lazy smoke slow spiral!ng
from out the Stone-built chimney. COW
mooes in the middle distance. Note the
relevancy of, the cow and the moo.
roar of applause shakes the chamber.
Wonderful" cry the colleagues of the
Honorable Bourke And it is wonderful. 1t
has nothing to do with the tariff, but it is
wonderful just the same Leather and
hides retire to corner to die
The Honorable Bourke has tackled reci-