The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1906-07-26
THAT SKINNER BOY.
He Leads a Rule ana Brings About
Results.

to kill the bugs on the tomato vines
In the back yard. when a man came
out of a blacksmith shop. leading a
mule, and called to him:
''See here. young man, do you want
to earn ten cents ?"
yes, sir" was the reply.
Il want this mule led to the stables
at 205 Jay street Do you know
where that is p"
yes. sir. know three boys on
II don't want no kid business IN
this I want the mule led soberly
along and I don't want a dozen boys
following You look to me as If you
had sense in your head"
Yes, sir, I have"
Then here's the ten cents and
here's the mule. and you can paddle
right along. Remember-no TOM
fooling."
The mule had no objections to fol-
lowing Humpy, and they had gone two
blocks at a sober pace when the Green
boy turned the corner and opened his
eyes in Amusement When he could
get his breath he asked:
Hump, has your father been buy
ing a mule %
Nope. I'm leading him over on
Jay street for a man who gimme ten
cents"
"Gee-whizzl II you put the ten
cents at compound interest for ten
thousand years you'll be a rich man.
Leading a mule, Ell? Say, Hump,
we've read Robinson Crusoe.' and
while he was a mighty big man he
never led a mule. Neither did Ma
poleon nor Benjamin Franklin You
ought to be proud boy, can tell you"
II am modestly replied Humpy.
If was your father Id pat you
on the head and buy you a bulldog.
The eyes Of thousands Of people will
be on you today, and maybe they'll
have your picture in the papers Would
you dare trust me to lead the mule
up to the next corner? I've helped
to drive hogs and geese, but never
led a mule"
'sPd like to. but something might
happen" replied Humpy.
Yes, that's 50, and then you'd get
the blame of it,
All went serenely for the next three
blocks. Then a red-headed boy, about
sixteen years old, stepped out into the
street in front of boy and mule and
said:
''see here. Gully. jest stop a bit.
Where be you a-leadin' dat bird to ?"
Hes a mule, and I'm leading him
over on Jay street"
Don't dispute me, Gully. I knows
a bird when sees one, and I've seen
this bird before. cum along where
he was hitched to a post on Schemer-
horn street de odder day, and he
kicked out wild dem hind feet OF his
and landed on me stummick. was
unconscious for two days and nights,
and was calm fur me mudder all de
time. He's de very old bird what did
der trick, and now he's got to stand
up to me-"
you let this mule alone or I'll yell
for a policeman" threatened Humpy
as brayely as he could.
ssAll de police are me brothers-in-
law, Gully, and dey wouldn't even look
10 f~1
hits him wild me right"
Humpy yelled for the police, and
fortunately one was near. The red
headed boy made off at the first alarm
and the officer asked of Humpy:
Now. then. why don't you move on
with that mule?"
I'm going to-
wei, move on. We can't have no
mule and boy obstructing this way.
Let me give the old crowbait a lift"
With that the officer gave the ami
NAL a Whack with his club, and a sec
ond later something happened. The
mule dashed out with his heels and up
set the pushcart of q peddler, and then
turning around kicked his way up
pedestrians for fifty feet. Humpy had
to let go Of the halter, but the police
man finally caught the kicker and
handed him over to the boy and ex-
ssThis is a nice sort of business. isn't
ft2 Suppose the Internal brute had
kicked my head off! Suppose he'd
have broken both my knees, and me.
with wife and seven children!"
But you gave him whack, pro-
tested Humpy-
"Of course did: but what am I on
the police force for except to whack
folks and mules2 Get along with you
or III run you both IN
Humpys got along all right until he
had covered half the distance to the
stables. Then he came to a grocery
with a fat grocer standing in the
door and smoking his pipe. He llhteo
his hand and when Humpy and the
mule had come to q halt he came out
to the curbstone and asked.
boy. vhas dot some shackass you
vhas pushing along
'sIt's a mule. and I'm leading him
instead of pushing.
Don't tell me so! WAS IN der
grocery peesness twenty-five years,
und don't you believe / know shack
ass When see one"
'.But I say this is a mule insisted
Humpy.
BOY. If I vhas your ladder I git
YOU some bookjack for your freshness.
I hat seen more ash ten thousand
shackasses in my life, und I say he IS
one
Humpy was about to pass on and
end the dispute. when the grocer said:
" has SOAAACbitA5G 0CA AA-o-cN0- -
hind feet? I pick one up und seei
Look out or he'll kick your
Nobody is dis world can kick me.
L WAS too long in der grocery pees-
ness"
He stopped down to lift up a foot,
ana the mule put both hind feet
against him and sent him rolling. Just
then an auto came along and gave
the animal fright, and he backed on
on to the sidewalk and began to kick
for prizes In four kicks he about
cleared the front of the grocery of al
its display, and he might have
stopped at that if the groeer's- wife
had not attacked him with a broom
| stick. She whacked him good ane
| stout. but in return he sent his heels
! through the window and then gallopee