New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-02-22
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

OH, TO BE THE STONE AGE MANI
Could you really blame this Stone Age man
For slashing around bit,
And cutting loose with pound club
Whenever he fit?
There were no police in the good Stone Ago
And weapons weren't concealed,
And might made right in a lithic way
And a case was never appealed.
Why shouldn't the stone man use his club
When things went bit cross grain?
But he never got into roal bridge crowd
Or rode In q subway train.
II he'd ever made for his Harlem home
At the crowded hour of five,
BY the time he landed his first express
Would the guards all be alive?
When think Of the fate of the bland car hog
In the path of the Stone Age man.
1 sigh for those happy days of might
When our stalwart began.
What Joy to bind the porcine kind
To good bridge station post
And trim him up with a stout stone club
And leave him awhile to roast!
When 1 make a dash for the only train
That will my being late.
And drop my cash on the leg clogged floor,
And it's kicked all around the gate
l greet the ticket mans fumbled change
With curses long and loud.
Then make dash for the rear cars door
And am blocked by the whole blamed crowd
When the door slides to just in front of my nose
While I stand in helpless rage
Oh would that l were the good stone man
And lived in that dear Stone Age,
GARRETT SMITH.
Death in the without finching who lad $50
and his knees knocked together TREMENDOUSLY. He
was lace d 70 d Iace win tning more solemn
-, My gallant liant friend began the president of the
Carnegie Tt9 Hero dIS Fund C. Com a1ni
his dash for liberty was futile He was pursued
Captain Joseph Burger. Of St. Paul. bel,sv.s h.
reached the rank of captain younger than any, otbe
man in America. He enlisted IN 1861 when mir
teen years old He was in the battle of Mill Springs
one Of the first decisive Union victories in the war
de also fought at Cornth Chickamauga Mission
airy Ridge and Tullahoma. In his second engage
ment' at Dalton. Ga. he lost his left arm. besides
receiving wounds in his right hand and leg. He
was promoted to a captaincy when stationed ar
Fort Douglas in 1854, when only sixteen
A Disastrous Fire.An accidental blaze had
cleaned out Mrs Mndoons tiny parlor The in
str9yod property very highly ''' ue-
be payin me An there's all me foina nctrs ye
} }lst takes IN harrt out av me to think o. me
Ign Life. -'nrooh-
The 'Novoe Vremya" describes Nh. r.,,,,.,,.-
methods by which the Russian orthodox cIars
combat Tolstoy In a church in the ,,,I, %
Tasovo. In the province OF Kursk there Is a nc,
ure representing 'Tolstoy in He'll" and IN do tba
painter justice. he have risen TO the no.,
ollities OF the subject. To omit minor details how
ever picturesque Ioistoy is depicted lying In a
huge cauldron, from under which flames shoot an
all around. while demons dance about with AsndIsb
glee. The journal claims to have verified this
picture for itself ~
BY Special Favor.-He was a young and sr,.-,
9 tpiaF sermon sG0ts clergyman ell and 70 preach
~. ~ strange church Fearing thar
ms mar might be disarranged or that he might
ntscanty soTds on MS face. he quietly and sig
IN the vestry. John. could you get me glass;.
1onh disappeared. and after Il few minufss -.
t tG WIN something under his coat which to
,nrre SO hte or the divine he produced in the
IL as spses Vet on aopot ~ meenister for got
nAdnA told than IL was fos xosAe-Crstti.s ava