davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Morgan County democrat. (Versailles, Mo.) 1900-1906, 1906-02-02
had endorsed the 20 Russians.

had endorsed the 20 Russians. The
whole 80 men were on the ground roll
ing in the sawdust. the Japs rolling
over and under the Russians. twisting
their legs and arms in a unknown
manner, and making them yell for
help like a mastiff that has trifled In
en- overbearing manner with q little
bulldog, until the bulldog got mad
and began the chewing act on the mas
tif's fore leg.
II was the worst mix-up ever was
and the managers told pa to put a
stop to It. and pa pulled off his coat
and grabbed the first Jap he could dis
cut, and began to pull him, like you
would take hold Of the leg of q dog
in u fight.
Pa said: Here, quit this foolishness.
cause there is an armistice, and the
wal is over. anyway"
o! O! but the Jap didn't do a thing
TO pa. He grabbed pa by the wrist,
ana he seemed to be having an epilep-
tic At. and pas leg shot out SO mis-
feet hit q guy pole, and then the Jap
pulled him back like he was a rubber
ball on a string. and then he took pa
by the elbow and held him out al
arms length. and then swung him
around a few times and let go of him,
and he fell down among the reserved
seats which representatives Of the
press occupy. Pa stood on one ear
on a crushed chair, with his legs over
the railing. and when he came to,
the newspaper men wanted to inter
view pa. Pa said all he remembered
was that the air ship was sailing ove
the town, and they threw him out fol-
Morgan County democrat. (Versailles, Mo.) 1900-1906, 1906-02-02

show felt sorry for the little Japs,
cause some day the big Russians would
ride right over them, and kill them
right in the ring. said that every
body thought the Japs ought to resign
from the show, for fear of a clash with
the Russians, or else they ought O.
have some grown persons to act as
c%haperones.
You ought to have seen the look Of
scorn OF the faces OF the Jap jugglers
when the Interpreter told them that
the circus people were afraid the Rus
SLAMS would hurt them. They jabbered
Inc that the ten little Japs could whip
the 20 Russians In four minutes.
Probably it was none OF my business,
and | never ought to have repeated 1t.
but In Q circus everybody wants to
know everything that Is going on. SO
when the big leader of the Russians
asked me what those brown monkeys
were talking about, told him:
Nothing particular, only they say
tne ten Of them could lick you 20
Russians In four minutes"
"a Gee, didn't that Russian talk kopec
and damski, and froth at the mouth.
Then he called his Russians together,
ana the talk sounded as though a
soda fountain had burst. Then they all
yelled: "Killovitch the mOnkeyouskis."
| went and told pa there vas going
TO be a riot between the Jap jug
slers and the Russian horsemen, and
probably the fight would take place
when the Japs came out OF the ring
at the afternoon performance, and the
Russians went in, right near the
dressing-room. | aslScd pa not to
mix in it, but keep away in the animal
tent. Pa said, not much, he wouldn't
be away, and he told all the managers,
and they all got around the dressing
room to stop the muss, If one started.
We'll, to show how the laps wei.
organized, as soon as they felt there
was going to be a row, they KEEP;
their eyes on the Russians all the time
they were In the ring doing their pole
balancing, and the little Jap up on the
bamboo pole, with a fan, kept jab,
bering to the fellows down on the
ground, and l could see that trouble
was coming. When their act was over
the Japs bowed to the audience, and
started out where the Russians were
lined up to come riding in. The biz
Russian said: Look at the little
monkeys" but he hadn't got the
words out of his mouth before the
.Japs turned. and every man grabbed
the tail OF every other horse, anf
jumped up behind the Russians. an
each of the ten Japs took a Russiaf
by the neck with a jiu jitsu strangl'
bold, end reached out his leg anc
wound 1t around the Russian ON tEt
next horse. and In ten seconds the!
Morgan County democrat. (Versailles, Mo.) 1900-1906, 1906-02-02

I did not mean any harm when I told
the Japanese jugglers that they ought
to kick against having those Russian
cavalrymen in the show, the fellows
who ride horses standing up. in the
wild-west department. cause l had
listened to their Russian talk. and
It seemed to me they were spies who
were looking for a chance to do in
Jury to the poor little Japs." l
could see that / made the Japs mad
the first thing. and then I told them
that pa and all the managers Of the
Morgan County democrat. (Versailles, Mo.) 1900-1906, 1906-02-02
TICKLESOME TALES.

In the classroom during the football
season. The students were deeply
shocked. yet they managed to preserve
the outward forms OF respect. but
when, presently. 1t turned out that the
fellow knew his lesson, there was none
so poor to do him reverence. Hes
gone ~stale!" was the sneering whis-
per which ran from Np to lip.
Morgan County democrat. (Versailles, Mo.) 1900-1906, 1906-02-02
IEorrotrs' Feudal Lord Dead.

New Orleans. Jan. 30.-Chief PuO-
Aa-Un, feudal lord of the Igorrotes,
died here of heart disease. The body
will be kept until the tribe, now in
winter quarters here, shall return to
the Philippines. where the funeral will
be conducted.
Morgan County democrat. (Versailles, Mo.) 1900-1906, 1906-02-02

A recent visitor to BeaconsHeld
churchyard asked a middle-aged Sa-
tive CT the village to be directed to
the graves Of Burke and Waller. The
maj said he had no recollection OF
any such persons having been buried
there. But" no added, you see that
little chemists shop over there? That's
the shop where Devereaux, the trunk
murder man. used to 10 an appren.
tica!" .
Morgan County democrat. (Versailles, Mo.) 1900-1906, 1906-02-02

Carmi, H.. ian. 30.--J. =. Storms.
city marshal OF Graysville, was exon
Grated by the coroner's jury Of killing
EIos Kitchen.
Morgan County democrat. (Versailles, Mo.) 1900-1906, 1906-02-02

The Bad Boy Causes Trouble Between
the Russian Cossacks and the Jap
Jugglers - A Jap Tight : Rope
Walker Jiu-Jitsu's Pa-The An
finals Go on a Strike-Pa Runs the
Menagerie for a Day and Wins
Their Gratitude.
Morgan County democrat. (Versailles, Mo.) 1900-1906, 1906-02-02

What the average man needs more
than anything else Is u supply OF eve
uing reception conversation. ,
Morgan County democrat. (Versailles, Mo.) 1900-1906, 1906-02-02

Cold weather makes ice. Ice makes
the water wagon slippery. A slip
perry water wagon is hard to hold on 70.
Hence, therefore, etc, etc.
Morgan County democrat. (Versailles, Mo.) 1900-1906, 1906-02-02

The president OF a bachelors club at
Nevada. Mo-, has resigned to get mar.
ried. The presumption IL that he grew
tired Of heinx ct the head Of thingA )
Morgan County democrat. (Versailles, Mo.) 1900-1906, 1906-02-02
SWIPED SQUIBS.

It may be that 1t IL "footbawl' rather
than football to which the public OBJ
jects.
Morgan County democrat. (Versailles, Mo.) 1900-1906, 1906-02-02
By HON. GEORGE v. PECK
Author of''Peck's Bad Boy Abb

Copyright by J. b. Bowies.I
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1906-09-09

up in her midst a man Of Ged, asking
a small modicum Of her wealth, 10
found an institution in her very midst
to comfort and befriend the men who,
by their aniuous profession. the sea,
contribute 10 the making Of that wealth;
men, who, for want of the home and
family life enjoyed by Others are COM
PEELED to resort in places large with
peril for their souls, having no other ne.
course at hand for shelter, entertain.
ment, nourishment, Rev, Peter Eletl.
son, the chaplain OF the newly founded
Seamans' and Nshermans' Institute OF
this city, is about TO ask OF Astoria
and Astorians some small share OF their
abundance, toward the securing OF
the ground whereon shall be built the
home Of the Institute. and for the cred
ii of the Gty-hy,the.Sea II is hoped he
will not have to 20 far, nor long. in
this sea.town, for the largess that shall
make the venture a quick and genuine
success, Give him the glad hand. and
be sure ii holds something tangible
when You put it forth; the cause is
good and just, and credit to Astoria
He wants but $1,000.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1906-09-09
BIG ITEM OF COST.

The war department cost the people
of the United States in 1904, SllI,50o,-
600; the navy department, SlOs5Oooo0;
the postotfiee department was run at a
cost of l52e50000; the interior Sl65,.
0O0O0o; while the department of agri.
culture cost less than S600O000. The
expenses OF the interior are nearly three
times As much and the pOstoilice depart
ment two and one-half times as much
every year as the agricultural Depart
ment has cost for all OF the sixty.six
years OF its history. One battleship
costs enough to run the whole agrcul.
tural department year and vet Con-
gresham lands OF Indiana thinks the
scientists Of this department are writ.
ing farm bulletins 10 see their names
in print, and that the government must
economic in their publication.
The work of this department benefits
5,70034l farming families. Nearly
twelve and one-half million copies OF the
972 separate government agricultural
publications were issued in 1906. Six
hundred OF these publications were re-
prints, showing their popularity These
books tell the farmer what when and
how TO plant; how to fertilize, when to
reap; and this with never piece of
guess work but always with definite
scientific precision, the result of untir-
ing investigations and experiments. 1t |
Is not too much to say that it is due
mainly to this government assistance
that the value Of the farm crops has
increased one hundred per cent in *
years. In other words, from 1899 to |
1906 the increase in the value OF the |
crops OF the American farmer aggre-
gated about the same as the sum to-
tai OF the increase from 1902 to 1899;
and from 60 per cent to 4s per cent of
all the exports OF the United States
each year since 1900 have been pro.
ducts Of the American farm. |
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1906-09-09
BEwAREI

Just at this time the mail order
houses are active in flooding the coun-
try with big handsomely gotten up fail
catalogues, quoting attractive prices on
staple articles and making all sorts
Of big sounding claims for your cash.
They do not offer to exchange their
goods for the farmers eggs, poultry or
other produce. They don't trust
penny's worth, but make you pay cash
before you get the goods and the freight
besides If any thing is wrong with
the goods or they do not suit, they will
not exchange them for you. They pay
no taxes into your city or county treas
ury, with which UT schools are main
tained, roads bridges, and sidewalks
built. They do not contribute to our
churches, charitable institutions, nor to
our poor. Then why should you be
so willing to patronize them? You know
that they must make large profits and
that their bargains are usually bargains
of repentance for the buyer. Two of
the large mail order houses Of Chicago
are rated worth from ten to twenty
million dollars each, and they have
made these vast fortunes by selling in
feror goods at prices OF superior arti-
cles. Still farmers and others are con-
stantly sending their money to get mail
order bargains, and when they get bit
they say nothing but bite on the next
tempting bait,
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1906-09-09

There are about eight classes of town
killers and every town is afflicted with
one or more of them First, those who
90 out Of town to do their trading; Sec
ond, those who are opposed to imporye-
ments; third, those who prefer a quiet
town TO one Of push and business;
fourth, those who imagine they own the
town; fifth, those who deride public
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1906-09-09

spirited men; sixth, those who oppose
movements not originating with them
selves; seventh, those who oppose ev-
cry movement that does not appear to
benefit them; eighth, those who seek
to inure the credit or reputation Of
their neighbors.
Morning Astorian, 60 cents per month.
delivered by carrier,
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1906-09-09
<<>~<<>>~%~~~~>%>
ITEMS AND ATOMS.n

The 0regonian is informed BY the
esteemed Astorian tnewspaper) that
Portland is not the sole and inseparable
atom and item of final adjustment No
doubt Astoria is, though we should be
glad to be more specifically enlightened,
on the indubitable authority of the As.
torian, whether Astoria is merely an
item or an atom, or both."-0rgonian,
Tth.
We assume the function OF supplying
the Specific enlightenment sought, by
declaring that Astoria is indubitably
an atom and item, and both, since it
could not be the one without being the
other
In the eyes of the Portlander and his
Oregonian. their atomic theory pre-
vailing) this city is an atom, not vet
having reached the dignity of item
hood; We are conscious of this and it
moves Us, at times, to resentment. As
toria is something very potent. pre-
judicial, almost threatening, in the
inner consciousness of the Portlander
and his Oregonian; but she is not on
their maps; not if they can help it, as
witness the half-eolumn editorial in
that great paper yesterday, wherein ev-
cry ccast town, city and county, in the
state il heralded to the reading world
except Astoria and her fine old county.
This, in the one all-potent journal Of
the great state Of Oregon, indicates pref
ty plainly, its policy at least. to sub
merge, deny, discredit the one city it
fears enough to compel resort to such
glaring tactics.
Astoria is an atom in the conglom-
crate whole for which the Oregonian is
supposed to stand, though that paper
would have it otherwise; Astoria has
helped to build up the commerce and
wealth and prestige of the metropo-
lis through long years of contribution
and she does not believe she has had
value received, predicament shared by
many other communities in the state.
She has been atom enough to pour her
quota of tribute into the Golfers Of
Portland through half century Of
neighborliness, and if Portland has ever
missed an opportunity to direct its in
huence against this city the record does
not prove it. Just now Portland, via
its megaphonic sheet is stopping over
with suddenly acquired interest in "Or-
egon's rich coast country" but never a
word has it to say of this section, save
one "atomic' 'allusion, bare, beggerly,
printing of single word, "Clatsop"
Well, it had best keep its eye on the
rich coast country of Oregon, for as
that shall fully and certainly forge to
the front of state commerce, so sure
" shall Portland come to bitter re-
membrance of it's hide-bound policies
through the years it has contemned and
neglected these "atoms" along the coast.
That it is hedging now, is only too ap-
parent. 1t will have "items" enough
to deal with in the near future, in this
very relation.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1906-09-09

A western man who has had consid-
erable experience in raising potatoes,
says that by planting two or three flax
seeds in each hill not bug appeared
in the patch. He claims to have tried
it for several years in succession with
always the same results. This is a
simple and inexpensive experiment and is
worth trying.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1906-09-09

OILS says: 81 advised him to use Cham
herlain's Pain Balm, and the first ap-
plication drew out the Inflammation
and gave immediate relief. have used
this liniment myself and recommend II
very often for cuts, burns, strains and
lame back, and have never known II TO
disappoint." For sale by Frank Hart
and Leading Druggists.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1906-09-09
GIVE HIM THE GLAD HAND!

Astoria has made a splendid record in
1906 for liberality in many directions,
wherein charity and good-fellowship
have figured as the leading motives. She
has done her whole duty in the matter
of San Francisco's suffering thousands;
she has given handsomely toward 10y
al demonstration on the GLORIOUS
fourth" she has contributed other thou
sands to the perpetuation of her fine
record as an hospitable entertainer in
the regatta way. And now, there rises
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1906-09-09
COCO 0o0oC @ O O @ O. O @
@ Editorial SALAD. @
0cco coo @ 10000

Down in Texas, according to the
Houston Post, the man who has three
Pasadena cantaloupes for breakfast, a
peck of Elberta peaches for dinner, and
forty-two pound watermelon for sup
per, can hand the hoarse hoot to the
beef trust every day in the week.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1906-09-09

Pain from Burn Promptly Relieved by
Chamberlain's Pain Balm.
A little child OF Michael Straus Of
Vernon, Conn.,, was recently in great
pain from q burn on the hand and as
cold applications only increased the in.
nammaiinn. Mr.. Strauss came to Mr..
james n Nichols, local merchant, for
something to stop the pain. Mr.. Mich.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1906-09-09

$500
5000
Our Boys Department

Includes the choice of the worlds best makers for
younger men and little men.
Larger in and assortment than all the other chill
drens departments in the city combined
Has built its place in popular favor by the sale Of such
clothing as can be depended upon for the utmost style
finish and moderate price.
It's success is, we reasonably believe to be the best
proof of the above statements Of fact.
'Al Boy" values.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1906-09-21
POINT ON SLANG FOR A PEER

British Duke Learns why Apples Are
Sometimes Called Peaches.
Boarding n Broadway car at Wall
street, New York, the other afternoon
a stylishly dressed middle aged man of
aristocratic bearing took a seat well
forward. Opposite him sat stockily
built man of florid complexion dressed
in overalls and coBtentedly chewing an
apple, says the New York Herald. He
presently he remarked to the new
conner:
Another warm day, boss" The lat
ter smiled and replied in a decided but
refined English accent:
Very warm, indeed. Is it not unusu-
ally oppressive for this time of the year
in New York;"
Guess it is summit that way" said
the man in overalls. Then suddenly he
put his hand into a eapacious peck t
and drew out Il monster apple and gen
erouSly offered il to his fellow pas
senger, adding as he did so:
Them comes from Niagara county.
couldn't grow its equal in England or
anywhere else. I'm in the fruit bust
ness and know"
The preferred gift was politely re-
fused. The man was persistent, how
ever.
Take it," he said; 'it's a peach, an
the finest we ever eat"
"Aw, indeed replied the other, this
time laughingly accepting the fruit
I'm rather rusty on the subject Of
pOmology. my friend" he continued,
but 1 can tell any variety of the Pyrus
malus family when see it. May / ask
why you call an apple reachT
Explaining the collOquial meaning OF
the term the man of fruit reached his
street and left the car with "s'long.
sir" His neighbor, however, remained
in the ear until Forty-second street was
reached, where he alighted with the
apple still in his hand and walked to
the Hotel Manhattan. On the way he
hailed a passing newsboy, bought a
paper and then handed the apple 10 the
gamin. The distinguished looking man
was the Duke of Buckingham, who has
been visiting New York
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1906-09-21
OEDICAT|NG HARvARD'S MEDICAL SCHOOL BUILDINGS

The dedicatOry exercises in cOInec-
ton with the opening of the new build
| ingS of the Harvard Medical school
will he held ut Boston Oh Sept % and
%. They will fittingly inaugnrate the
| largest and most perfectly equipped
| group of buildings devoted to medical
instruction and research in the world
| and, from an architectural standpoint,
one of the most beautiful groups in
America, says Il Boston correspondent
of the New York Post.
For the construction and endowment
of this new undertaking the university
is indebted to the generosity of J. Pier
pont Morgan, John ID. Rockefeller,
Mrs. Coils L. Huntington, David Sears,
James Stillman and number of other
, benefactOrS. The estimated cost of the
undertaking was $4,950,000, all of
which was secured before the plans
We're accepted.
The buildings now completed. exclu-
sive of the large and well equipped
power house, are five in number-one
designed primarily for administration
and four for laboratory purposes-i. e.,
a. anatomy, comparative anatomy, his
SNAOSSy anu CLiADi OlOSg VI ltAis SIOlOSl
and chemistry; 81 pathology, bacteri-
ology and surgical pathology; a by
giene, pharmacology, comparative pa
tholOgy and surgical research The size
and magnificence of these buildings
illustrate most strikingly the new era
III medical teaching. A few years ago
building the size of any. one of the
four main buildings constituting this
group would have been thought ade
quate for all purposes
All the buildings are constructed of
white marble, and the departments are
so arranged that those most closely
affiliated with each other are in the
same building, while the rooms for
each department are connected in the
same way All the buildings are con-
nected by corridors on the basement
level In the center of each building
is an amphitheater occupying two stO-
ries, and in the second story of each
is library. These are accessible from
both wings.
Each laboratory building is equipped
with every facility for carrying on the
work of that special departmental e.,
the anatomy and histology building
has its separate driveway for intro I
ducing anatomical subjects. large re
frigerator for storage, isolated dissect-
ing rooms and an elevator so located as
to properly serve the dissecting and
demonstrating rooms; the physiology
and chemistry building has its pens.
cages, exercise yards. etc, for animals |
on the roof. while each department |
conducting operations on animals has |
its animal operating suit. equipped |
with most approved hospital appli- |
ances, the chemistry wing is construct
ed with special reference to the varied |
methods OF research and investigation
now attracting the attention of scien-
lists; in the meteorological and patho-
logical building four large students
laboratories occupy one wing, while !
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1906-09-21
The Perfume Cure.

One American girl who spent the
summer in Paris and who went
through what the Parisians said was
the hottest season in many years. with
sunstrokes common enough TO make AM
American feel at home, has returnedl
with reports of a new antidote for
heat that the Parisienne has developed.
says the New York Press. The Paris
fair ones call IL fcure'-the perfume
cure. 1t is meant to prevent sunstroke
and has been elaborated until there
are special antidotes for a dozen spe-
cial nervous ailments. The Parisienne,
says the scents blown from an ato-l
mizer have She effect of evolving cool
ing breeZes, so while her men relatives
partake of iced drinks she seeks Out
the atomizer or patronizes the penny
in-the-slot scent machine. OF course
the perfumers are fostering the fadi
The American girl who reports IL says
that the various perfumes are CLASH
fed as follows: Rhine violet curesl
nervous irritability, palm violet cures
neuralgia headache, wallhower cures
faintness, lavender water cures con-
gested headache, hops and poppy In
duces sleep and pleasant dreams. car
nation reviyes enc and stimulates lnl
hot weather. lily Of the valley quietsI
the nerves and hyacinth has the effect,
of a Turkish BATH