davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lake County times. [volume] (Hammond, Ind.) 1906-1933, 1906-07-30
Sure SIGN.

''How very polite Mrs. Brown was
this morning!"
''Then she must be mad at you"
The Lake County times. [volume] (Hammond, Ind.) 1906-1933, 1906-07-30
Ambiguous.

She-Are you fond of hot biscuits?
He (meaningly)-Tha depends upon
who makes them.
The Lake County times. [volume] (Hammond, Ind.) 1906-1933, 1906-07-30
Ouite Rioht.

What sort of joke is the most en-
joyable?"
THE one that a pretty girl dimples
att
The Lake County times. [volume] (Hammond, Ind.) 1906-1933, 1906-07-30
Plain Enough.
rH<YTE

"Why do they call it a one night
standT'
Because the players do not have
time enough to sit down.
The Lake County times. [volume] (Hammond, Ind.) 1906-1933, 1906-07-30
PERT PARAGRAPHS.

Where the poor are, there also is
some one getting rich off them.
The Lake County times. [volume] (Hammond, Ind.) 1906-1933, 1906-07-30

An airship polar expedition look
good these days.
The Lake County times. [volume] (Hammond, Ind.) 1906-1933, 1906-07-30

Every child thinks the earth wa
made for him, and it probably was.
Palestine daily herald. [volume] (Palestine, Tex.) 1902-1949, 1906-04-21

sou want a Governor VINO VIII shut
his eyes to violation of the constitu-
ton either by public officers or or
ganized plunderers, then don't vote
for me. No legislative scheme of
doubtful propriety or about which
hangs even a doubt of its constitu-
tionality will ever be fastened upon
the people either by my approval or
by nv silence.
Free press., 1906-05-26
MEMORIES OF THE PAST.
The Day Intended for Appropriate
Commemoration of the Deeds
of Heroes

Memorial day was founded that
there might be a few hours in each
year set aside for the appropriate
commemoration of the deeds of men
who had been killed while serving the
country in the army or navy or who
had died since having so served. For
a number of years it was generally
and suitably observed. Then in some
places 1t ceased to be observed at all.
In many it was given up to bicycle
and horse racing and other sports and
festivities.
Diversions of this kind have been
widely and properly protested against
as dissertations of the day. The pro.
tests seem to have had some effect,
for Observance Of the occasion prom
1ses to be not only more general this
year than usual but also more appro-
pirate.
Contemplation of the courageous and
self-sacrif1cing patriotism exhibited by
past generations is to little purpose
II 1t do not Undue their successors
with purpose to emulate them.
The men of to-day have confronting
them questions almost as difficult as
any which have yet been dealt with,
and the best way the sons can show
their appreciation of what the fathers
accomplished is by resolving to go
about their work as citizens with the
same courage and in the same spirit
as their fathers went about THEIRS
Chicago Tribune
Free press., 1906-05-26
THE POINT OF THE PRovERB

An old proverb advises the shoe
maker to stick to his last. It means
that a man always succeeds best at
the business he knows. To the farmer
it means, stick to your plow; to the
blacksmith, stick to your forge; to
the painter, stick to your brush
When we make experiments out of our
line they are likely to prove expen-
sfve failures.
1t is amusing, however, to remark
how every one of US secretly thinks
he could do some other fellows work
better than the other fellow himself.
The painter imagines he can make
paint better than the paint manufac-
turer; the farmer thinks he can do
job Of painting better, or at least
cheaper than the painter, and so on.
A farm hand in one of Octave
Thanet's stories tells the Walking
Delegate of the Painters Union, "Any-
body can slather paint" and the old
line painter tells the paint salesman,
''None of your ready made mixtures
for me; reckon I ought to know
how to mix paint"
The farm hand is wrong and the
painter is wrong: Shoemaker, stick
to your last" The fancy farmer"
can farm, of course, but it is an ex-
pensive amusement. If it strikes him
as pleasant to grow strawberries at
fifty cents apiece, or to produce eggs
that cost him five dollars a dozen, it
is form of amusement, to be sure,
if he can afford it, but it's not farm
ing. If the farmer likes to slosh
around with a paint brush and can af-
ford the time and the expense of hay
ing a practical painter do the job
right pretty soon afterward, it's
harmless form Of amusement. If the
painters customers can afford to
stand for paint that comes off in half
the time it should, they have perfect
right to indulge his harmless vanity
about his skill in paint making. But
in none of these cases does the shoe
maker stick to his last.
There is just one class Of men in
the world that knows how to make
paint properly and have the facilities
for doing it right; and that is the
paint manufacturers makers of
the standard brands of ready-prepared
paints. The painter n1iIeS paints;
the paint manufacturer gri7adS them
together. In a good ready-prepared
paint every particle of one kind of
pigment is forced to join hands with
particle of another kind and every
bit of solid matter is forced, as it
were, to open its mouth and drink in
its share of linseed oil. That is the
only way good paint can be made, and
if the painter knew how to do it he
has nothing at hand to do it with. A
paint pot and a paddle are poor
substitute for power-mixers, buhr-mills
and roller-mills.
The man who owns a building and
.neglects to paint it as often as it
needs paint is only a degree more
short-sighted than the one who tries
to do his own painting or allows the
painter to mix his paint for him.
P G.
Free press., 1906-05-26
Keep Alive Love for Flag.

AS each year rolls around some patri-
otic city is asked to welcome the G. A.
R. in a grand runeion, striving to out
do some other city, which with out
stretched arms has welcomed the G. A.
R. in a grand reunion, striving to out
to life dormant spirit of devotion to
the old flag and resolve that this
union of states will never be dissolved.
Without the G. A. r. to refresh the
memory of the people of this country,
they would be apt to forget the great
sacrifice this nation suffered that this
union should not be dissolved.
Again there is another wing to the
G. A R., the Sons of Veterans, organ
lied to go hand in hand with the G..
A. R. to perpetuate their memory for
generations to come, to keep alive the
love for the old flag, as the strength
of the nation depends on the love OF its
people to defend it in time of danger.
Free press., 1906-05-26
Fraternity, Charity and Loyalty

The greatest service the Grand Army
of the Republic has rendered is the
beautiful way in which it gives life to
the principles of the organization-fra-
ternity, charity and loyalty.
That millions of men of every degree
of life and station should for 40 years
be bound together by this common bond
Of brotherhood is not only worthy of
admiration, but also of imitation by the
members of this republic.
Charity, or love, is the greatest thing
in the world, and love is the key to
every department of life, the founda-
tion of patriotic teaching, the safety of
the country, the home and the individ-
ual.
Loyalty to their comrades, their or
ganization, their country and their God
has been fittingly illustrated in the
lives of these boys in blue.
This trinity of principles, if copied
by our S0,000,0 900 citizens, would make
us the greatest nation on earth.
Free press., 1906-05-26
MI1Enn ma 0cnyer

Unless early and correct treatment is
applied the patient seldom survives
when once the disease is fastened upon
her. We believe Lydia q. Pinkham's
Vegetable Compound is the most efi-
cient treatment for chronic kidney
troubles of women, and is the only med
icine especially prepared for this
purpose.
When a woman is troubled with pain
or weight IN loins, backache, frequent,
painful or scalding urination, swelling
of limbs or feet, swelling under the
eyes, an uneasy, tired feeling in the
region of the kidneys or notices
sediment in the urine, she should
lose no time In commencing treatment
with Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable
Compound. as it may be the means Of
saving her life.
For proof, read what Lydia E. Pink
hams Vegetable Compound did for Mrs.
Sawyer.
g cannot express the terrible suffering
had TO endure. A arrangement of the female
organs developed nervous prostration and g
serious kidney trouble The doctor attended
me for year, but kept getting worse. until
was unable to do anything, and made ,lp
my mind could not i've. finally decided
to try Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Com
pound as a last resort, and am to-day a well
woman cannot praise It too highly. and
tell every suffering woman about nv case.
Mrs Emma Sawyer, Conyers, Ga
Mrs. Pinkham gives free advice To
women address in confidence, Lynn.
Mass.
Free press., 1906-05-26
To the Nations Dead.

Long have they lain meath the grass and
sod,
Those noble sons that in battle trod.
No more the sound of the bugle call
Shall quicken their steps to dutys call.
They only wait for the trumpet sound,
When the great and good shall at last be
crowned,
And the battle and strife of yesterday
Shall be lost alike to the Blue and Gray.
Ye who march on this day in May,
To scatter garlands of flowrets gay
over the mounds of soft green sward,
Where sleep the brave in battle gored;
Know that to these ye owe your land,
So scatter the buds with willing hand,
With thoughts of love while lips do pray
For the peace and rest of the Blue and
Gray.
And let the flag on each grave rest,
OF him whose struggle made it blest.
Those Stars and Stripes let proudly wave
Above each soldier honored grave.
For these are they who held them high,
Caring not that they should die.
So let the Union feel to-day
Thoughts of love for the Blue and Gray.
Free press., 1906-05-26
Surprise All Around.
BREAD DYSPEPSIA.
he Digesting Element Left Out.

The D1gesting Element Left Out.
Bread dyspepsia is common. 1t af-
fects the bowels because white bread is
nearly all starch, and starch is digested
in the intestines, not in the stomach
proper.
Up under the shell Of the wheat berry
nature has provided a curious deposit
which is turned into diastase when it is
subjected to the saliva and to the pam
creatic juices in the human intestines.
This diastase is absolutely necessary
to digest starch and turn it into grape
sugar, which is the next form; but that
part Of the wheat berry makes dark
flour, and the modern miller cannon
readily sell dark flour, so natures val
liable digester is thrown out and the
human system must handle the starch
as best it can, without the help that na.-
ture intended.
Small wonder that appendicitis, peri
tonitis, constipation and all sorts of
trouble exist when we go so contrary
to natures law The food experts thar
perfected Grape-Nuts Food, knowing
these facts, made use in their expert
ments OF the entire wheat and barley.
/
them to moisture and long continued
warmth, which allows time and tho
proper conditions for developing the
diastase, outside of the human body.
In this way the starchy part is trans
formed into grape-Sugar in a perfect
ly natural manner, without the use of
chemicals or any outside ingredients.
The little sparkling crystals Of grape
sugar can be seen on the pieces OF
Grape-Nuts. This food therefore IS
naturally pre-digested and its use in
place Of bread will quickly correct the
troubles that have been brought about
by the too free use OF starch in the
food, and thatsis very common in the
human race to-day.
The eefFct OF eating Grape Nuts ten
days or two weeks and the discontin-
uance of ordinary white bread is very
marked. The user win gain rapidly in
strength and physical and mental
health
sAThere's q raasns,
Free press., 1906-05-26
THE NEW MEMORIAL DAY.

With blossom-laden hands, to-day the ma
ton stands,
Beside the graves of those who died for
liberty.
The story is long told, our hearts can no
more hold
The bitterness of strife, the tears, the
agony.
Yet the memory of these men shall perish
only when
The manhood of the land, the love of
freedom, dies.
And 10! beside their sod new fold is turned
for God
New martyrs called for freedom, mid
womens tears and cries.
BY these just newly dead-their blood for
Cuba she'd
And these who lie at peace, in the land
they died to free;
Free press., 1906-05-26
G. A. R. the congervator of Peace.

The Grand Army OF the Republic has
been one of the greatest conservators of
peace because its members realize more
fully than any one else could the cost
of war both in blood and treasure. The
wounds and disease contracted by them
in the civil war are ever present re-
minders of its cost They would have
been ready to have sacrificed much be-
fore engaging in such another struggle.
They have been the leaders Of all
movements tending to higher patri-
otism and loyal service to their
country. They have fostered and
encouraged every effort looking to
more loyal citizenship. They have
taught the world lesson in fra
ternity extending not only to their
own members, but to the men of the
south who fought against them, and
believe they have done and are doing
more to reunite the two sections Of our
country as patriotic American citizens
than any other agency or society.
Free press., 1906-05-26
1s61-1ao6.

Sing anthems OF holy love that country
breeds in men,
DER their graves in muff1ed tones let
-ums sound taps again.
with each note that fills the air a
scented bower raise,
And let a rain OF flowers fall to tell a ma
tion's praise.
Oh. flowers, red and white and blue, pile
on and mark them all;
In natures flag enshroud the men who
heard their country's call
And those WHO march. let's cheer for them
and cheer both blue and gray,
For this Is theirs-a country,s thanks
this Decoration day.
Free press., 1906-05-26
FRoTH OF FUN,

She-"I think Mrs. Newcombe is so
sweet, don't you? You can read her
character in her face" He-"Yes, if
you read between the lines"
Eyes, I'm going in for teaching"
Going in for teaching? Why, I
would rather marry widower with
half a dozen childrenI" so would
but where's the widower?"
well, Emily, did you have a good
time at the masked ball?" "Oh, l had
splendid time. l made my husband
dress up as a knight in heavy armor,
and he wasn't able to bulge from one
spot all night"
Mr.. Tubbs-"Well, Bobbie, how does
your sister like the enga cement ring
gave her?" Bobbie-"WeIl, it's a
bit too small. She has a hard job tc
get it off in hurry when the other
fellows CALI
She-"Oh, that's the great prima
donna, is it? Is she famous because
of her voice OF her acting?"
He Neither, but she has a motor ac-
cident regularly every week. and that
keeps her name before the public"
Surprise All Around.
Miss Matkyns-Where is Mr.. Cash
leigh now?
Mr.. Wylkins-I don't know exact
ly. Somewhere up in Canada.
"Why, I didn't know that he Was
going away!"
'"The bank directors didn't, ether
-Somerville Journal.
Free press., 1906-05-26

Let all men know we keep their vigil while
they sleep
On guard. for aye, of this great nations
destiny.
These heroes have not laid their brave
lives down in vain,
Her sons again have pledged our land to
liberty.
o hearts that grieve to-day for soldiers
far away,
Who bore our country's flag and died to
set men free.
Look up and sigh no more Like those who
died before,
The nation keeps their memories and the
peoples hearts are true.
For Chickamauga still echoes on through
San Juan Hill
To one nation and one people meath the
red, white and blue.
Free press., 1906-05-26


And at each succeeding roll call, fewer
voices answer: 'tHere!'
Still their regiments are marching many
march with noiseless tread,
And no bugles sound Assembly in the
bivouac of the dead.
Hats are reverently lifted to the heroes
lying here;
Lift them to the living heroes-han them
all with cheer on cheer.
Not for long will they be with US; soon
each regiment will be
Tented here beneath the blossoms of the
land it helped to free.
But to-day the drums are muffied and the
flag at half-Inast waves,
Keeping green dead heroes memories as
the grass above their graves.
Still another weary winter shrouded in the
snow they lay;
Now we bring them crowns and garlands
of the loveliest blooms of May.
Let them rest in honored slumber. while
their praise, from shore to shore,
Eighty millions throats are swelling-We
are free forevermore!
Elsie Florence Fay, in Success Maya
zine.
Free press., 1906-05-26
Many Smokers Prefer Them to lOC
Cigars. Annual Sales Eight
Million $4,000. .COO.l

The popularity of Lewis Single Binder
straight sc cigar is largely due to the fact
that this factory always uses thoroughly ripe
md perfectly cured tobacco, thus giving the
smoker rich, mellow tasting cigar. The
tobacco is from crops showing the best quail
ity and is graded fancy selected. Smokers
have found that they can always depend on
the same high standard of quality in the
Lewis Single Binder. The Lewis Single
Binder Factory is one of the largest holders
of fancy graded tobacco in the United
States. Lewis Single Binder cigar gives the
smoker what he wants and at the right price.
Men who can pass their ignorance
off for eccentricity are born diplomats.
Chicago Daily News.
Free press., 1906-05-26
A LAND OF OPPORTUNITIES.
Inducements, Held Out by Western,
Canada Are Powerful.

A recent number of the Winnipeg
(Manitoba) Free Press contains an
excellent article on the prospects in
Western Canada, a portion of which
we are pleased to reproduce.
The agents of the Canadian Gov
ernment, located at different centres
in the States, will be pleased to give
any further information as to rates,
and how to reach these lands
Just now there is a keener inter
est than ever before on the part Of
the outside world, in regard to the
claims of the Canadian West as a field
of settlement. At no previous time,
has there been such a rush of immi-
grafton, and the amount Of informa-
ton distributed broadcast is unprece-
dentedly great.
I'm the majority of the States of
the Union and in Great Britain the
opportunities for home-making and
achieving OF even a modest compe-
tence are at the best limited More
over, according to the social and in
dustrial conditions prevalent in those
communities, the future holds out no
promise of better things. 1t is not
strange, then, that energetic young
men should turn their eyes to Can
ada's great wheat belt, where every
man can pursue fortune without the
hindrance of any discouraging handi-
cap.
''The inducements held out by West
ern Canada are powerful and made
manifest by the great movement now
in progress. That the prospects are
considerably more than reasonably
certain is borne out by the history OF
the country and it's residents. The
promise of gain is powerful, but when
added to it there is the prospect of a
corresponding social and civil eleva-
tion, it should prove irresistible to
young men of particularly desirable
class for any new country.
"The Canadian West is alive with
opportunities for the young man who
aims at becoming more than a mere
atom in the civil and national fabric.
Some Of the eager young fellows who
arrive on the prairies daily are des-
| tined to become more than merely
prosperous farmers. In the near fu-
ture great municipal and provincial
development will be in the hands OF
the people. The stepping stone to
both financial prosperity and civil
| prominence is, and will be, the farm.
For every professional opening there
are hundreds Of agricultural openings.
The Canadian prairies are teeming
with opportunities for the honest and
industrious of all classes, but they
are specially inviting to the ambitious
| young man who seeks a field for the
energy and ability which he feels in
I.S.
Of "Back to the soil!" is more than
a vain sounding phrase when applied
to Western Canada"
Free press., 1906-05-26
TRIBUTES TO THE PRIVATE
"Let Us Care for Him -

with malice toward none. with
charity for all, with firmness in the
rlgnt as God gives us to see the right,
let US strive on to finish the work we
are IN, to bind up the nations wounds,
to care for him who shall have borne
the battle, and for his widow and his
orphan-to do all which may achieve
and cherish just and lasting peace
among ourselves, and with all nations" I"
-Lincoln's Second Inaugural.
Free press., 1906-05-26
.ELove of Country Alone. -

Love of country alone could have in
spired 100000 men to die for the union.
Nothing less sacred than this love of
country could have sustained It's 900
brave men who suffered and starved
and died in rebel prisons Nor could
anything else have given comfort to the
100000 manned and diseased who
escaped immediate death in siege and
battle to end in torment the remainder
of their patriot es.''-William Nc.
Kinley, July 4, 1894.
Free press., 1906-05-26
Sleepine. Not Dead.

Ye silent men, who to your country gave
The last full measure of deVotion-life-
Ye fell asleep while the tumultuous
strife
Around yeu swelled in fury, like the wave
Which breaks upon the rocks which prove
its grave.
To-day, around you all the air is rife
With wailing cries from bugle and from
fife
The voice of that dear land you died to
save,
Nay, ye have never died-ye live to-day
In every soul which joys that it is free;
In that fair flag with which the breezes
play,
With every flashing star undimmed, un-
lost;
shall be
Before our land forgets what freedom
cost.
-Ninette NJ. Lowater, in N Y. Sun.
Free press., 1906-05-26
Fnitanh in Shorthand.

A tombstone has been erected IN
the West Hampstead cemetery over the
grave Of Mrs. Louisa Day, the inscrip-
ton on which. including q vera Of
poetry, Is In shorthand
Free press., 1906-05-26
Memorial Dav.

Oh. draw aside the drapery of gloom
And let the sunshine chase the clouds
away
And gild with brighter glory every tomb
We decorate to-day.
And in the holy silence reigning round,
While prayers of perfume bless the at
mosphere,
Where loyal souls OF love and faith are
found,
Thank God that peace is here
And let each angry impulse that may start
Be smothered out of every loyal breast;
And. rocked within the cradle of the heart,
Let every sorrow rest.
James Whitcomb Riley. in Reader Maya
zine.
Free press., 1906-05-26
'HHeroic Years of America. y

eve begin to realize that the years
we have SO recently passed through,
though we did not appreciate at the
time, were the heroic years of Amer
lean history. Charles Francis Adams,
on THE Double Anniversary" July 4,
1869
Free press., 1906-05-26
"First Rank Of Nil

"First Rank Of Militant Nations"
The record of both sides places the
people of the United States in the first
rank of militant nations. Col.
Thomas L. Livermore.
Free press., 1906-05-26

"Union Dearcr for Their Blood"
God bless the union! 1t is dearer to
us for the blood of the brave men
which has been shed in its defense''-
Edward Everett at Gettysburg, 1863
Free press., 1906-05-26
Somewhat of steerer Himself.

kin ye tell me where 1 kin find
a bunko steerer?" asked the rural Wis
itor.
mo, can't" answered the police
man. What does yez want wild
bunko steerer, anyway"
''Ive done spent all my money. but
If 1 kin find a bunko man - be
good fer a dinner, b'gosh. iis-
vile Courier-Journal
The Yale expositor. (Yale, St. Clair County, Mich.) 1894-current, 1906-07-20
| Miss Woude Morris

They do not realize that the back is
the handspring of woman's organism,
and quickly indicates by aching dis
eased condition of the female organs
or kidneys, and that the aches and
pains will continue until the cause is
removed.
lydia e. Pinkham's Vegetable Com
Mound has been for many years the
one and only effective remedy in such
cases. It speedily cures female and
kidney disorders and restores the fe-
male organs to a healthy condition.
81 have suffered with female troubles for
over two years, suffering intense pain each
month. my back ached until IL seemed as
though il would break, and felt so weak all
over that I did not find strength TO attend ia
nv work but had to stay in bed large part
of the first two or three days every month.
I would have sleepless nights, bad dreams and
severe headaches All this undermined my
health.
1--WE consulted an old family physician. who
advised that try Lydia E. Pinkham's Vege-
table Compound. began taking IL regularly
and sen found that could sleep and eat
letter IMAM had done for months. Within
two months became regular and no longer
suffer from backache OF pain. Mis- Maude
Morris. Sec. Ladies' Aid and Mission Society,
a5 X. Hunter St.. Atlanta, Ga.