The new South-news., 1906-03-17

He Couidn't Supply = Porssrhouse Steak
Nit WOOL on It."
Spiereischreck was as mild hammered
a butcher as ever scut,led a beef or
cnt a Sleeps throat and when the teI-
erhone bell jingled merrily he took
down the receiver with broad Ger.
man smile in expectation OF good Gus.
tom by wire.
This is Mrs. Smallwood." tinkled q
far-off feminine voice. land I wish you
would send up a nice porterhouse steak
for supper-one about two inches
thick '-pause-"with a collar on and
long. white silky hair--about seven
years old. should say"
Splegelschreck gasped In astonish.
ment. and the good natured counter.
ance wore an air of puzzlement.
"Not dit you set;" be inquired Il
guess | didn't ged ID ride. We don't
got vot you wand. l guess. If you wand
all you set"
Back came the voice to Spiecels.
chreck: Il said a poodle. with long,
white hair and collar on-about seven
years old
"Iss she gone crazy?" muttered Spie
selsehreck. rubbing one hand nervous.
ly on his butchers apron and claspins
the receiver tighter TO his ear Il
guess We don'd got vot you wand" he
answered. I'VE don't got very bil
demand vor poodles. Maybe you wand
blain sausage"
"Who said anything about wanting
poodles?" came back a voice indignant
ly. "Have you been drinking. Mr..
spiegelschreck? | want a nice porter.
house steak for supper" r"-panse-''wish
long white hair and my name on the
collar"
Spiegelschreck eyed the telephone
curiously. wondering if it were playing
trick upon him.
"Yat you wand iss a borderhouse.r
he repeated, but vat for do you wand
long. silky hair on i'd? We could NOT
gif you a borderhouse nit hair on id.
You wand der hairdresser's. You hat
der wrong number. nicht wahr?"
81 will pay a large reward If you get
It for me-" came back the voice over
the wire. II would give $50 to have 10
back right now. l want it SO bad.
poor little lost thingw
"Py chiminy, dot vowan iss crazyr'
declared Spiegelschreck in alarm.
Then he replied: Il couldn't get you a
borderhouse NIT long hair on id und
sefen years olt if you paid s100. You
bedder delefone to der medical college.
Vot you wand is mummies."
"Mr. Splegelschreck," came back a
voice quivering with indignation. "you
are certainly intoxicated! l shall tell
my husband TO send you check for
more with our custom"
Here was fresh trouble. The Small
woods were good customers, but the
courtesy due good custom has its lin.
its. Who ever heard Of porterhouse
steak seven years old, with long white
hair? Spiegelschreck had not. and he
was pretty good butcher, too.
II peg your bardon." Spiegelschreck
bud blease order again vot
you wand und say it blain. l guess
meln hearing is pad alreaty."
"A poodle, l said" came back the
voice. with long white hair and my
name on the cellar"
dit you wand id for subber?' gasped
Spies gelschreck.
Central. who is that crazy German
on the line?" snapped out a sharp
voice. 'Im talking with the business
office Of the Bugle. and advertising for
a lost dog. Please tell Mr.. Lagerbier
to ring off,
You are crazy yourselfr yel@ed
Spiegelschreck. you wand a border-
house steak NIT WOOL on i'd like a
sheep. Noss iss los NIT youf,
Central" came another voice, "can't
l order porterhouse steak without
getting whole dog kennel on the line?
Hello. Mr.. Spiegelschreck. hellow
But Spiegelschreck had fled. "Iouiers
he said TO the boy. "der wire iss full
nit crazy vimmens. Dey wand Dor.
derhouse steaks NIT WOOL on 'em.
Don'd go near der delefone. l am go.
ing out to get some schnapps."--J. W.
Foley, in Judge.