New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1906-05-16
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

1t is not often that class Of school children is
permitted to examine its teacher. but a Glasgow
pedagogue pleased at the way his pupils
answered his questions in examination that he
told them they could ask any question they liked.
No one took advantage Of the OFFER and the teacher
was about to dismiss the class when he noticed
one little chap In deep thought. Well. what is
it?'' he asked Il just about to ask you, sir.
replied the youth. whether if you were in a soft
mud heap up to the neck. and was TO throw a
brick you. would you duck2
DO you demand the custody OF the childrenr'
1 wen ~ replied the woman who had sought the
place for them. Chicago ecord-Herald.
What marriage would endure after a practical
Joke especially upon the husband? st. Louis
man. victim Of a merry jest. is suing his wife for
divorce. The pair went to a masked ball The
husband was somewhat jealous Of a German actor.
The wife disappeared in the throng and, after a
long search. the husband grew suspicious Of pair
in black dOminoes who appeared much interested in
each other The other women at the ball instnu-
ated that the pair the wife and the actor
The husband gave the female black domino
severe lecture. when. 10! his wife appeared wear
ing mask except expression Of innocence!
Everybody laughed. as the whole farce-comedy had
been arranged in advance. The husbands Of
humor would not stand the strain. He seeks relief
from the practical joker.
Long Distance Jane-An old farmer was skeptt-
cal as to whether people who were miles apart
could really talk to each other over telephone
one day his wife went to make a visit to p dis
tant friend who had a telephone in her house
neighbor who also boosted house telephone. and
who persuaded the farmer to call up his wife as
Following Instructions he put the receiver to
his ear. and. after the usual prelminaries. he
shouted shouted Lat.
Just then a flash Of lightning caused by the heat
Of the, summer day struck the wire. and he fell
grned that the old man should meet with such
an Sd S on that ms suob t tn OF wo B6 9gS
except in case OF storms But the farmer was
however, and would not try again He rose to his
feet and. shaking, his head knowingly said:
Ladies' Home Journal
A Methodist minister in England has been preach
ing seventy-seven years. He is the Rev. Richard
Rymer. of Brixton. He a preacher when
william Nv was King OF England and Andrew
Jackson President of the United States.
Crossed in love once more lamented the
Princeton Tiger
London dentist made a novel proposal Of mar
riage He fell in love with an elderly patient who
ordered a of false teeth from him When the
teeth delivered the woman found a neat little
proposal engraved the plate which held the
teeth.
At the Garage oy-Mr smith is telephoning
for his machine Can YOU send it to him to-day?
Head Man-Don't how we can. Why his
machine is the only enc around here fit to use-
Life
A Chicago clubwoman. Mrs. Abbie s shOen has
a new plan for making 1t uncomfortable for bach
elors She proposes that they should be COM
PEELED TO support at least orphan" She SAYS
81 she had the framing Of law for the taxation OF
bachelors she would have each taxed for the main
tenance Of a child now being cared for by an in
RtItution by the state. She would have that
child educated, clothed and fed hts expense and
under pain OF diverse penalties she would have him
brought into direct personal contact with the child
No Sinking Of responsibility can be allowed. I'M
der any circumstances. This is a serious matter
Direct personal contact with the child might make
the bachelor -shyer Of the matrimonial halter than
ever
The Modern Way.-''dy dear you must rao,,,,
take Freddy IN hand about the way he uses slang
To-day he asked me what entomology was ana 7
told him the science Of bugs"
"WellT'
Then he asked me II an entOmoloa>st was a
crazy man."-BaltmOre American.