davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04

Be a Sport.


Don't be stingy with your money;
Do not hide your roll away
Just as though you thought you'd never
Draw another cent of pay.
no not fear you'll die of hunger,
Though you sometimes may be short;
Loosen up on some occasions.
Be Il sport.
Do not pull away forever
On your ancient pipe;
Dig down deep and find nickel
For long, dark "snipe."
II you're walking with lady,
'Twould be going some
To throw down al least a penny
IT, some gum.
N u're going TO a party
v lady at your side,
Do walk: n dime will purchase
Bo of you a street car ride.
When you pass an ice cream parlor,
All at once enthuse
And invite her to have something
Maybe she'll refuse.
When gentleman is airing
Some of his pet views
Wants TO bet two cents to bluff you
Take him II you lose.
Throw your money round real reckless
In some swell resort;
Buy yourself bright red soda.
Be a sport
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04

ployed would pny n hundred tines og7r
the S2000O,000 that the tile 10 tie PhAio-.
pines cost the United States and whose
wage earners outnnfnbcr the entire pop
uiation Of the Philippines-take dlstliic'>
iy contrary view. They have iooi.ea 30
the matter at least as cafefuily az did
the iunketing excursionists OF the Tatt
club. They have much more at stake
than had the members OF that pleasure
seeking company, and their investigation
rpf conditions and probabilities may fairly
|INe supposed to be no less thorough and
USeir conclusions no less accurate. iheir
belief Is that the removal of the toa'lff
from all the products of the Phllippne
Islands viii arrest the development and
likely result in the determination of the
agricultural Industries named.
As a matter of consistency and good
faith the American Economist must stand
with the American and against the Tnfti-
fino policy 1t cannot be called the
Roosevelt policy. 1t Is Taftifino pure and
simple. All the knowledge and the in
spiration underlying the presidents Tart
ihno divagation may be traced directly
to the war department The official re.
ports bearing upon the subject have been
written with Taftifno pens. The excur-
sonists, for the most part invited by
the secretary of war to join him In
tour of inspection, saw facts and condi-
tions through Taftifino spectacles. Some
OF them, however, saw with American
eyes, and their Judgment Is that the
highly paid labor of the United States
cannot in Justice or fairness be sacrificed
to the cheap cody labor of the Philip
pines. For example, Lafayette Young,
editor and proprietor of the Des Moines
Capital, one of the great Republican
newspapers of Iowa, declined to permit
his vision to become perverted by Taft
optcitis. He saw things straight and
square through sure enough American
eyes. Upon his return from the Philip
pine tour Mr.. Young wrote and printed In
the Capital a significant series of sup
positions as to what President Roosevelt
might say in his Forthcoming message to
congress. Among other things which he
hoped would not come about through the
presidents departure from safe and
sound protectionism, Mr.. Young specified:
"And suppose sugar from the Philippine
Islands should be put on the free list the
labor in producing such sugar being fur
nished by Chinese, as advocated by
great many people,"
In summing up the consequences GER
tain to attend the surrender of settled
principles and policies the Capital con-
cludes with this sententious saying
'If the president should take such ac-
ton the men who forced him to do It or.
whose agitation resulted in his doing 1t
would be- praying for the rocks and
mountains to fall upon them inside OF
sixty days
Well, the president has taken such ac-
tion as regards cheap Chinese labor COM
petition, forced thereto, as we firmly be-
lieve, by the Taftifino element We be-
lleve, moreover, with the Capital that the
policy is a mistaken one and that IL 1t
shall be approved by congress to the ex-
tent of inaugurating free trade with the
Philippines it will bring disaster to
American industry, to American labor, to
American homes, to American prosper
itU
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04
suIzer's Heroic Remedy.

The old saying "Many men of many
minds" tinds it's latest confirmation in
the multitudinous bills already intro
duced, being introduced and to be in
troduced in congress to regulate rail
road rates. Some of them IL enacted
into law would put an end to interstate
commerce, others would give the rail-
road magnates more rope than they
have now, while some-many, in fact
possess really meritorious provisions.
Nobody with any sense wants to de-
stroy the railroads. Nobody except
the benefciaries wants to see the pres
ent unjust practices Of the railroads
continued. Certain of the bills are
long and so involved that il they be.
came law it would require years for
the courts to interpret them. No
doubt that is precisely the reason why
some of them are built on that plan.
Even in the bills of some members who
are honestly endeavoring to regulate
the roads in the interest of the public
there Is mystifying surplusage Of
words, for it is hard to convince peo-
pie that the law is best which accom-
-plishes a given purpose in the fewest
words.
Now, it is we'll known by all who
have pestered their heads about this
railroad question that one of the chief
complaints is as to rebates. In fact,
it is not overstating the case to say
that that is the cause of the whole up
roar. OF course there are other abuses
practiced by certain roads, such as
Overcharging for icing refrigerator
ca e but these could have been cured
by The interstate commerce commits
sion by the exercise Of powers already
possessed.
Revolving the injustice of rebates in
his ample Uranium, that illustrious
New York Democrat, Hon. William
Sulzer, has evolved from his inner con-
sciousness an idea for curing the re-
an exceedingly brief bill. He simply
provides that the rebate rate fixed by
railroad slNll be the maximum
which it can charge and gives a cause
of action for damages to any per-
son whom it undertakes to charge
more than the rebate rate. That's a
heroic remedy, but 1t would do the
work most effestually. Evidently
Brother Sulzer hit the mark. No cir.
cumlocution about his plan, but a
clear cut proposition which even the
dullest can comprehend and so radical
that no railroad will dare to evade It,
however much 1t may desire to do SO.
That would give the same rate to all
shippers, and that is exactly what ev-
erybody desires except those who are
granted rebates. or course in this, as
in other matters, there are ways OF
whipping the devil around the stump
but If a railroad is compelled to haul
everybody's coal = from Scranton to
New York, for instance--at the lowest
rate II fixes for hauling anybody's coal
1t will ponder long and carefully
whether it will not be hazardous to
!, grant rebate TO any one.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04
Topheavy With Editorials.

Why are the Boston papers so laden
with editorials? Is it from the eager
desire of the editors to express their
opinions or is there so much greater
demand for editorial views in New
England than in the west? While
metropolitan journal in the west feels
like it is overriding the thing il it
prints three columns, the Boston pa
pers-for instance, the Herald is fair
sanple-print six columns and then
throw in column of semieditorial
chatter as if by way of apology for not
continuing ad infinitum. And by the
way, the heavy, column long utter
ances are chiefly on tariff revision, rec
iprocity, dual schedule. How the pro-
cession moves!
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04

III us. DUncDOuy else HAS
said that "all the world loves lover"
A sort of compound of these two say
ings Is, "a touch Of nature makes the
whole world kim" All of these ancient
sayings have been illustrated by the
hearty manner in which Washington In
general and congress in particular have
received the news of the betrothal of
Representative Nicholas Longworth of
Cincinnati and Miss Alice Roosevelt.
Everybody congratulated Longworth,
and everybody would have congratulate
ed Miss Alice If everybody could have
had chance, for every well regulated
person feels as much like congratulate
ing a woman on getting a good hus-
band as he feels like congratulatlng a
man on getting a good wife. All this
goes to show that the average Ameri-
can citizen, man or woman, believes
that marriage is not failure notwith-
standing what few disgruntled and
sensational writer's have had to say in
recent years. oh, yes, divorces are
numerous. These are exploited for all
they are worth--indeed, for more than
they are worth. One swallow does not
make q summer, and the unhappiness
of those divorced and seeking divorce
doesn't prove that there are not millions
of happy homes in this broad land-the
happiest places on earth. Perhaps the
fact that the announcement of the ap-
preaching nuptials was made as the
Christmas holidays were near at hand
had somewhat to do with the pleasure
with which it was universally received,
for Christmas has come to be much
more of a home festival than re-
ligious festival. Unquestionably the
fact that the bride elect is a presidents
daughter and the bridegroom a men,
ber of the house had much to do with
increasing interest in the news. 1t is
not spirit of tiunkyism, but of genu-
inc Americanism, that causes Ameri-
cans to take an interest in whatever
pertains to the White House and its oc-
cupants. The White House is our
house. The president is our president,
whether we voted for him or voted
against him. Most people are glad that
he is young enough to have daughter
young enough to marry. Every Ameri-
can is glad that the presidents daugh-
ter is going to marry an American and
did not hitch herself in double harness
with some foreign duke or earl or
count. The fact that Mr.. Longworth
is congressman shows that he is held
in high esteem in the city where he was
born and where his ancestors have
dwelt for generations. Weddings in
the White House have been few and
far between, largely by reason Of the
fact that several of the presidents were
childless and most of those having chill
dren were so old that the children were
married and settled in life before the
fathers were elected to the presidency.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04
Jesse Elected President.

Missourians everywhere (multitudi-
nous raceD will rejoice at the latest
honor bestowed upon President Rich
ard ii. Jesse of the Missouri university.
He has just been elected president of
the National Association Of University
Presidents, which has just closed ts
session in Washington, although he
himself is In Europe. This reminds me
that Missourian, one Of my constit-
uents, is president of the greatest sci
entific school in America, the Massa-
chusetts Institute Of Technology. He
is u member of the able and puissant
Pritchett family.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04
Couldn't Smell Anything Wrona.

James Whitcomb Riley, in COM
pany with the gentleman who used
to manage his lecture tours, was
once examining hall in town in
Ohio where it was proposed Mr..
Riley should give a reading. The
two men had as their guide colored
janitor who was quite talkative. Mr..
Riley observed that the janitor made
use of long words of whose meaning
he was ignorant. So the poet de-
termined to have little fun with
him. All at once Mr.. Riley began
to sniff the atmosphere critically.
at seems to me, Jim," he said
sternly, "that the acoustics in this
place are pretty bad"
"Why, boss" said the janitor re-
proachfully, '|yo' shore must be
mistaken. don't smell anything"
Success Magazine.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04

roads maintaining lobby here? If
their letter is reliable it is wasteful
and ridiculous excess. Messrs. Clews
Il Co. let the feline out of the bag a
little further along by casually saying,
"A vast number of bills will be intro
duced on these subjects, but their vol
ume and complexlty alone will be quite
sufficient to prevent radical action"
From this it will be observed that they
are not only close and trained observ-
ers, but philosophers also.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04
Illustrating a Phrase.

Wife-What is meant, John, by
the phrase carrying Goals to New
castle?"
Husband-It is a metaphor, my
dear, showing the doing of some
thing that is unnecessary.
Wife-I don't exactly understand.
Give me an illustration-a familiar
one.
Husband-Well, if / were to bring
You home a book entitled GLOW to
Talk, that would be carrying Goals
to Newcastle!
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04
A Fair EXCHANGE.

A man who had purchased some
currant buns at bakery was dis
tressed ON starting to eat one to find
that it contained fly. Returning
TO the bakery, he made an indig-
nant complaint, demanding another
bun in place of the inhabited one.
''I'm sorry, sir" said the sales
woman, Il can't give you another
bun, but il you will bring me back
the ly | viii give you a currant for
h."eHarper's Weekly
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04
Hamed Them.

A story comes from Milton, N.
H., of an old clergyman named
Goodwin. He was a tall, broad
shouldered man and was said to
have the largest hands of any man
for miles around. One noon young
man named Allen was taking dinner
at the elders home. 1t was the
elders custom to ask blessing at
the table, and Allen had evidently
not been used to this sort of thing,
for instead of waiting he began to
eat. The elder raised his hand with
a restraining gesture and said:
"Pause, young man."
"Paws" was the reply. 'I should
think they was paws"
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04
A Reminder.

Cheaply-Hello, old mani You
seem to be in a brown study.
Popley-Oh, hello! Yes, l am.
You see, my wife asked me to stop
at the market for something and ]
can't think what it was.
Cheaply = Here, have cigar.
Maybe that'll help you to think.
Popley-Thanks. Oh, yes, / re-
member now. 1t was cabbage she
wanted.--Philadelphia Press.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04
The Wall Street View.

The Wall Street Wow.
One would naturally suppose from
the way the newspapers exploit Pres
i9ent Reosevelts war on the trusts
that all the trusts would be seeking
their cyclone cellars. Quite the con-
trary. however. Wall street seems to
Hike the presidential message and to
say: POGO is very good. / have not
had enough" The banking house of
Henry Clews & Co. sends out week.
ly letter in which they give their clients
their views of the situation. In this
letter of Dec. 0 they say, Congress
has opened, and Wall street breathes
easier" In that Wall street differs
from your Uncle Grover, who was al
ways anxious TO get congress off his
hands, III. G. & Co. continue: Usually
the beginning of new session Is an
event Of more or less concern in finan-
treatment Of the questions connected
with railroads and corporations was
30 rational and temperate as to allay
rather than excite distrust 1t Is quite
evident that no radical legislation will
be put through during this session Of
congress affecting either railroads, cor
perations or the tariff" Query: Isn't
It rather peculiar that the message
which has been so exploited us Il rev.
olutionaFy uttefanee by anxious cor
respondents should have such n sooth-
Ing effect on Wall street? Wasn't ii
also peculiar that after the much trum-
peted victory of Mf. Attorney General
Rnex ip the Northern Securities case
the Steeks OF every railroad which was
part and parcel Of the merger went up
tastead Of dowRf People who read
yhe foregoing quotations from the
weekly epistle of Messrs Henry Clews
d %. will begin to doubt whether our
presidential st, George is really doing
the dragon much harm after all. When
the Prohibition excitement in Kansas
was at Its height somebody asked the
brilliant John James ingalls, how
things were In Kansas. That cynica.
statesman replied, THE Prohibitionists
have all the law they want; the other
fellows have all the whisky they want;
so everybody is happy" So it appears
that the reformers have all the talk
they want the trusts have all the lib
eRty they want, and the goose honks
high.
III the meantime the Washington
Post IL warning the railroads to take
their army OF lobbyists out OF town,
declaring that their presence here Is
liable to no enrage the reform element
that radical and regrettable things may
happen, but II Messrs. Clews 4 Co. are
correct what sense Is these ~ the rail
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04
Never Fails.
COULDN'T Help 1t.

'Have you closed the contract with
the ossified MANI"
"Not yet; he is hard man to do
business with"
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04
Gone Forever.


Senator Benjamin r. Tillman of
South Carolina declares that he wants
back his part Of the insurance money
which has been going into the Repub-
lican campaign fund. An ancient poet
hath it, Man wants but little here be-
low, nor wants that little long which
does not seem to describe accurately
the senator's frame of mind. True, he
wants but little, but he is quite likely
to want that little forever and day."
to borrow Mr.. Speaker Cannons dec
laration touching the length of time we
intend to retain the Philippines. Ben
jamin might as well make up his mind
that his share Of that stolen Insurance
money has gone from him and his heirs
forever.
Ion. Mr. A. Michalek of Chicago, the
grocer who would not accept a Repub-
llcan nomination for congress in O
str Democratic district unless in
all printed reference to him his bust
ness and street number were stated,
was unexpectedly elected. lnjhis case
the question of American citizenship
has been raised by certain of his con-
stituents, question which for time
kept Albert Gallatin and General james
Shields out of the senate of the United
States. 1t is question so rarely
raised that everybody was rusty on
the precedents. 1t Is acknowledged
that he is not native born American,
and it is alleged that neither he nor
his father was ever naturalized.
General Harry III. Bingham has one
right which there is none to dispute
that is, to swear In the speaker. He
does that in his capacity as "father of
the house." the oldest memberin point
of continuous service wearing that
honor. Both Speaker Cannon and Gen
eral Ketcham of New York have served
more years in the house than General
Bingham, but not continuously. Gen
eral Bingham represents Philadelphia
district. His immediate predecessor
as father of the house was also Phil
adelphian, General Harmer.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04
Improves With Aqe.


Hon. John Wesley Gaines of Tennes-
see, who represents the far famed
Hermitage district in the house of rep
resentatiScs, Is like wine in one regard
at lcast-hc improves with age. On the
resolution to refer the presidents mes
sage, he delivered on the insurance
question one of the ablest and most
carefully prepared speeches which have
been heard in that body in ten years.
He had the undivided attention of the
house while speaking and was fire.
quently applauded At the close he was
most heartily complimented by mem
bers on both sides of the chamber. A
more honest, courageous or Industrious
man does not sit in congress, and he is
q growing man. This last speech shows
a vast amount of study and research
and will well repay careful perusal.
have not room to quote it here, which
sincerely regret.
Governor Albert B. Cummins of Iowa
has been in Washington lately. There
was no public statement as to why he
was here. 1t may have been for recrea-
ton or for business. 1t may be that
this eminent Hawkeye Republican tar
-iff reformer was here to consult with
that eminent Republican tariff revision
list from Massachusetts, Senator Henry
Cabot Lodge, and to try to induce him
to enlarge his programme of revision,
for it will be remembered that up to
date the Bay State senator confines his
efforts at revision to an effort to place
green hides on the free list.
Taken by large and small the house
debate on the distribution of the pres
ident's message" was of high order.
Several brilliant speeches were made,
many good ones, scarcely dull one
The range of subjects was wide, as
was to be expected, for the president
touched on fifty-five subjects in his
message. But in the main the subject
discussed was insurance. Not word
was said in defense of the insurance
magnates who have been plundering
the people.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04
Success never apologies.

There are people who need have nc
fear as to the company they keep.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04
Lost Interest.

"He is an interior decorator" =.
"That SO? What is his specialtyT
painting walls and door castings"
"Huh, thought he was cook"
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04

Courtship is to maRlmony what the
cocktail is to the dinner.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04
Luck.

-dC6s
Some people do not believe In luck.
This is my sixth congress. Seats are
drawn by lot. In two congresses was
the first Democrat to draw a seat. In
three | drew early enough to secure
favorable location. In this, the sixth,
| was one of the last Democrats to
draw. Through the kindness of Mr.
Weisse of Wisconsin, who urged an ex-
change, | got II good one, and then,
through the kindness of Mr.. Wood of
Missouri, who also urged an exchange,
| secured one of the best In the house.
or course ] am deeply grateful to those
kind friends. The astronomer Proctor
once figured it out that man will hold,
on the doctrine of chance, only one
straight flush at draw poker In a M
Hon hands. On the same theory, /
would not be again the first Democrat
to draw a seat in more than hundred
congresses. The lottery for seats is an
intensely interesting performance and
OF good deal of Importance. OF
transacting the business of the house
ought to be where they can easily at
tract the attention OF the speaker and
where they can easily make themselves
heard. / do not mean by that the MAX
ing Of set speeches, which, contrary to
the common belief, is really a small
part OF the house proceedings. Any
man can borrow a good place from
which to make set speech II he have
not choice place of his own, but the
business Of the house is mostly trans
acted by interlocutory performances
In which there Is no effort at speech
making; hence the necessity that the
participants have seats from which
they can be heard. AS rule. they get
them. If they do not draw them to be-
gin with, others swap with them, an
unselfish sort Of performance on the
part Of those who yield the better seats
After all this is pretty good sort Of
world to live In.
The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1906-01-04

The Meter Ct Railroad
Rates-II Congressman
Sulzer wosl5 I,c1ncay Re-
bate Evil = Demccrlcy's
Bright Outlook-Split In
G. Q. P. Foresha jowed