The Virginia enterprise., 1906-11-16


it phases us to dine together coat
less and cuffless, we do so; and no
one suggests that national up
heaal is likely to result.
Elt in town it is different. The
buaboo of strict propriety seems to
taH mysterious ascendency. we
still dine together, but it is done In
th most proper evening dress. 1t
SENS to be the law-unwritten but
ualterable-that Hawkins and l shall
display upon our respective bosoms
9mething like square foot OF
xarchy white linen.
l hardly know why l mention this
natter of evening clothes, unless it is
that the memory of my brand-new
dress suit, which passed to another
sphere that night, still preys upon my
mind.
That night, above mentioned, my
wife. and dined in the Hawkins
home
Hawkins seemed particularly jovial.
He appeared to be chuckling with tri-
umph, or some kindred emotion, and
his air was even more expansive than
usual
When I mentioned the terrible ex-
plosion of the powder works at Pomp-
ton-hardly a subject to excite mirth
in the normal irdividual-Hawkins
fairly gufawed
But, Herbert" cried his wife, some
what Mortified, "is there anything hui
morOus in the dismemberment of three
poor workmen?"
'Oh, it isn't that-it isn't that, my
DEAR smiled the inventor. "It merely
struck me as funny-this old notion OF
explosives"
What old notion?" I inquired.
''Why, the fallacy of the present
methods of manipulating nitro-glvcer-
lne''
II presume you have a better
scheme?" l advanced.
'Mr. Griggs," cried Hawkins wife,
in terror that was not all feigned,
don't suggest it,"
"Now, my dear" began Hawkins,
stiffening at once.
Hush, Herbert, hush! You've made
mischief enough with your inventions
but you have never, thank goodness,
dabbled in explosives"
IT wanted to tell you what know
about explosives, and what I could
do" declaimed Hawkins
Don't tell us, Mr.. Hawkins" laughed
my wife. "A sort of superstitious
dread comes over me at the notion
Mrs. Griggs!'' exclaimed Hawkins.
eyeing my wife with a glare which in
any other man would have earned him
the best licking l could give him
but which, like many other things,
had to be excused in Hawkins
''Herbert!" said his wife, authorita-
lively. BE still. Actually, you're quite
excited!"
Hawkins lapsed into sulky silence,
and the meal ended with just a hint Of
constraint
Mrs. Hawkins AMI my wife adjourned
to the drawing-room, and Hawkins and
were left, theoretically, to smoke 4
post-prandial cigar Hawkins, how
ever, had other plans for my enter
tainment.
"Are they upstairs? he muttered, as
footsteps sounded above us.
'"They seem to be.''
"Then come with me-" whispered
Hawkins, heading me toward the serv-
ants staircase.
>'Where?' I inquired, suspiciously.
There was peculiar glitter in his
eye.
"Come along, and you'll see," chuck
led Hawkins, beginning the ascent.
"Oh, I'll tell you what" he continued,
pausing on the second landing, ''these
women make me tired!"
"Indeed?'
eyes, they do. You needn't look
huffy, Griggs. 1t isn't your wife or my
wife. It's the whole SEX They chatter
and prattle and make silly jokes about
things they're absolutely incapable OF
understanding"
MY dear Hawkins" said, sooth-
tngly, you wrong the fair SEX
"Oh, l wrong 'em, Ell? Well, what
woman knows the first thing about ex-
plosives?" demanded Hawkins, heated
ly. Dynamite or rhexite or mergan-
ite or carbonite or stonite or vigorite
or cordite or ballistite or theorite or
maxQmite-"
''Stop, Hawkins, stop" 1 cried.
'Well, that's all, anyway said the
inventor. But what woman knows
enough about them to argue the thing
intelligently? And yet my wife tells
mel, who have spent nearly half a
lifetime in scientific labor-she act
ually tells me TOTO shut up, when I
hint at having some slight knowledge
of the subject"
II know, Hawkins, but your scien-
tiflc labors have made her-and me-
suffer in the past"
"Oh, they have, have they?" grunted
Hawkins,. climbing toward = the top
floor well, come up, Griggs.". :
Iknewt the door at which he stopped
It was that Of Hawkins, Workshop or
laboratory. It was ON the floor with
the servants, who, poor things, prob
ably did not know or dared not object