davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1906-01-19
ss,ecti.w Jsdxes.

DIR. franklin thought that judges
ought to be appointed by lawyers, io,'
added the shrewd man. In Scotland.
where this practice prevails, they al
ways select the nblest member Of the
nrofesslon in order to get rid OF him
and sfAre his practSce among
Goaxeg.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1906-01-19
HI. Own Chair.

BEG pardon" said the garruious
messenger. but think | heard you
addressed as professor. Might III
ouire what chair you hold!'
"The chair right next 10 the door,
answered the professor. Il run snop
of my own"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1906-01-19
An Honest Thief.

On leaving Paris theater German
gentleman felt for his watch. 1t was
gone. Having strong suspicion, ne
laid violent hands OH man In me
crowd. who quietly gave up the ticker
When he got home, he found his OWE
watch lying ON the table.-Paris Jour
poI
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1906-01-19
M. pro,,er Caper.

Ton,-Here. You've started your
note to BorrouglIs "Dr. Sir. Don !
You know that SORT OF abbreviation Is
very sloven,y? Dick-No. sir Ut. Is
oil RIGHT IN this case. He owes me
money y.-PhilaGolpls Press.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1906-01-19

II suppose you're g,lng to Dr. Ma
sons funeral. grandpaT
"Oh." snarled the Infirm Old man.
..don,t talk to me about ether peoples
funerals. It's as much as shall 10
able to do to set ~ q; own-Lx'
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1906-01-19

Second uo dueiiSt. who on confront
ing his adversary las suddenly grown
pale and IS on.y just prevented from
falling)-rahe courage. man. know
your opponent is going to fire in the
air. DueliSt-Thats just what makes
me afraid. He's such notoriously bad
ch
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1906-01-19

Persons who want to sell their
Farms, or Property would do well to
place them in our hands for sale. We
have list of customers who want TO
buy property, and if the prices are
reasonable we can make quick sales,
J. N. Davis s. Co., Real Est. Agents
Woodstock, Va.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1906-01-19
Too Late,

She-I hear you have Just got mar
rIel Is il too late to congratulate you
He-Oh. much too late l was mirrieN
,hrce weeks ago.--Illustrated Bits.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1906-01-19
Conscienttous.

Young Wife-Whats the trouDls'
Why da yoa sit on the edge OF Tue
ehalrs !iushan We'll. dear you kno"
we are buying II on the installlneht
plau and that's oil / feel entitled to-
7 ifp
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1906-01-19

~ cannot understand. sir, why you
hermit your daughter TO sue me for
breach of promise You remember that
YOU we're bitterly opposed to our en-.
caeemept because wasn't good
enough for her and would disgrace ths
family
"Young man. that was sentiment;
this Is business"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1906-01-19

Ia5 .-ar, Ne., nreaEing INTO o
do v.u .ac wGstcr of the house
hearing ten. looked 5u Of the win
COW naa sid: "Erisld5. come L little
layar w ara not set In bed."-"Hu-
nor e ). lia."
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1906-01-19
rx,rr,enced Man.

She--,s NY hat on straights h
nresulne il u on t,le way yon want IT.
II Is n.,s on horizontal -somerVii's
Journal.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1906-01-19

J. chsn Tx Is cheap Benedict
For e)a.aeis oa.:c. don't advertise *
as u bargain Willie ~ VIE Is around.
-Uro1E IN Life.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1906-01-19

A man canuvt escape il 'ho'sn' ass
suors than hc. can in language if''"
fro -c.f ~ / the present
Arizona republican., 1906-06-09
EXPERIENCE NOT TEACHER.
It's Proper Mission Is That of an En.
 tertainer.

Experience as a teacher is greatly overestimated,' said the Crouch. Tt is true that the burnt child dreads the fire, but that don't prevent it from swimming in a quarry pond and get ting drowned. You see, we seldom en- counter the same sort of proposition twice. I monkey with a buzz saw and lose a finger. Well, I am wise to buzz saws. but pretty soon I get off a car without looking out for one coming from an opposite direction, and lose a leg. Then 1 blow into a gun to see If 1t is loaded, and when I get well l take out an accident policy and buy a gold brick.
 You may wonder why I recur tC this subject of experience. do so be- cause there is always something new and novel in it, and a man can be 365 varieties of fool every year, and then start in fresh for the next year.
 "Of course there are certain 'broa general principles that a man finally learns through a variety of expert ences. He will learn that to be happy is to be good, and that it is impossible to be good He will learn that there Is a law of compensation by which he receives that which he doesn't want for that which he does, and that all is vanity and vexation of spirit
 And after he has learned these things he discovers that there is a multitude of exceptions, and these keep him busy until he turns up his toes.
 No, I don't believe in experience as a teacher. It should not be regarded as such. It's proper mission is that of entertainer. If a person could get into that attitude of mind which regards all 70 nh of olo for his amusement. he would get the greatest amount of good out of experi- ence. But that would be to be a phil osopher, and a real philosopher is not human. ."-St. Louis Globe Demo- crat.
Arizona republican., 1906-06-09
THE REFORM SCHOOL
 RUNNING SMOOTHLY
HSw the YOGnSSters are Given .
 New Start in Life.

Superintendent J. F. Mahoney, of the Industrial School at Benson, spent yes terday in Phoenix en route to Winslow. where he goes on private business and on a short visit to his family. His son. who has been attending the Tempe Normal school, joined him here and goes north with him. MT. Mahoney says everything is running smoothly and satisfactorily at the school. there being now enrolled fifty-two boys and three girls. The school has been very crowded but he has fitted up another dormitoyy in the attic which relieves the crowded condition of the boys dOrmitory and will enahle the school to care for quite q number more boys. The most pressing need of the school now is laundry and plunge bath, for the building of which preparations are under way. The work of building the new structure can mostly be done by Mr. Mahoney and his employees. with the help of the larger boys. They have already made the brick necessary eX- cept foF the burning which will be done at once and all they need now is the lumber which he hopes the board of control will provide. Tho new building is planned to be a T-shaped structure with a laundry at the lower end of the T and the plunge next to it. In either wing will be quarters for the two com panies of boys respectively.
 Speaking of the boys and girls in the school Mir. MahoneyN says they are mostly good children and their trouble has been a lack of proper rkstraint and discipline at home. He tries to keep before them the fact that they IS as youngsters who have merely started wrong and need to be given another chance. Most of them have the right idea about it and take the same pride in their school that the students do in other educational institutions. They have their school yell and their school baseball team has defeated about everything of Its size in the country round. Many of the boys who reach there are unkempt and some of them scrawney and apparently half starved, but after a few weeks of regular liV- ing and military discipline they begin to take on flesh. straighten up their round shoulders and are altogether inn proved physically as well as mentally and morally. The superintendent sees to it that the children are not kept in too close confinement either. Some times when there is a proper enter tainment in town he makes arrange ments with the managers and takes them all to enjoy it, the girls going with the matrOns and the boys with him. There is a school carriage which is at the disposal of the matrons oc- casionally at proper times, that the girls may be given rides in the sur rounding country, and the boys are from time to time given light tasks in town for a few hours, under the proper care. to relieve the monotony of life in school Altogether the SUD- erintendeat is quite proud of his charges. even if they do come from a class that other people have failed tC properly control.
Arizona republican., 1906-06-09
ADJUSTMENTS

All the available seats were sold last evening and the most enthusiastic aud fence of the season was gathered at Eastlake park to witness What Did Tompkins DO?" There was a. contin . uous ripple Of laughter throughout the evening. which grew into a scream at the fall of each curtain. All the spe- cialties were well rewarded with ap- Dlause. Five new people arrived yes terday morning to strengthen the com pany. The most important members are V. T. Henderson, Franklyn Hall and Miss Maud Lita. Tonight What Did Tompkins Do?'' vii be given it's final presentation. Dancing and ex- cursion train tonight. Beginning Mon day and continuing for the first half of next week the great success, "The Plunger,' will be produced. Entire change of specialties. Seats may be reserved at Sanichas'. Prices, 10, 20, 90 and 50 cents.
Arizona republican., 1906-06-09

No mans credit ever becomes so bad that he can't borrow troubIe.-Phila- delphia Record.
Arizona republican., 1906-06-09

Many a man won't take any back talk. even from his own conscience Philadelphia Record.
Arizona republican., 1906-06-09

A salt and pepper suit should b good for two easons.-Philadelph Record.
Arizona republican., 1906-06-09
Shirt Waists

Made of plain white India linon in several styles-some trimmed with lace; others with embroidery inserting. A regular 75c waist to- day for
Arizona republican., 1906-06-09
Ladies' Vests

On the bargain table today you will find the best qua.ty summer vest we have ever offered at the price. All sizes.
Arizona republican., 1906-06-09
Long Cloth

Just what you want for under wear-12 yards in a piece-36 inches wide. and sold regularly at s1.5O piece. Today's price
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-05-05
GUARANTEED LIQUOR CURE
No Detention From Work or Loss
OF Time Desire Fol- Drink Dc.
stroyed by orrine.

When one Of our most reliable
druggists makes a positive statement
that he will guarantee TO cure the
liquor habit II Orrine Is scd
in accordance with directions or refund
the money IL shows his great faith
IN the treatment IL is in this way
that Orrne Is sold 10y the leading
druggist IN nearly every city and
town. In every box Is "A registered
guarantee which entities you to n re-
FUND of your money II Orinne fails to
effect cure.
No other cure for the LIQUOR habit
has been sold ia this way and the re-
markable guarantee shows how much
superior crrne rs to the ordinary
sanltarium or home treatment. There
Is no detention from work or loss of
time when Orrine Is used 1t destroys
the desire for liquor. so that the
drink VIII not be missed, and also
cures the deranged digestion, weakened
nerves ana other i'll effects of excessive
drinking. restoring the patient to per-
feet health.
Orrlne Is prepared IN two forms,
Nc. |, the secret remedy which can be
used IN food or drink without the
knowledge Of the patient No. FOR
those who take the remedy Of their
own free Will Both forms are abso-
lutely guaranteed to cure or they
will cost YOU nothing. Treatise on how
To cure drunkenness free on request,
Orrine Co. Washington. u. c. The
price Of either form is 81 a box max
Ing the cost Of the complete cure less
than one-tenth what Is usually charged
at sanitarlums, with the guarantee that
the expense viii be nothing unless a
cure is gained
Orrine is for sale by Smith Drug Co,
Salt Lake City
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-05-05
SAVED BABY
LYONS LIFE
Untold Suffering and Constant
Mlsey--AwfuI Sight From that
Dreadful Complaint, lnfantiIe &c.
1ema- Commenced at Top Of his
Head and Covered Entire Body.
MOTHER PRAISES
CUTlCURA REMEDIES

,Jou, baby had that dreadful COM
Pialnt' inlantlle Eczema, which afflicted
, nm lor several months, commencing at
y, 'op OF his head, and at last covering
ms Thole body. His sufferings were
, unyolo and constant misery, In fact.
J ns'o sas nothing we would not have
S Ions 70 have given him relief. Tho
iiannny doctor seemed TO be wholly
Incapable, nc Of coping with the case and
,,.ei various experiments of bis, which
..au.ed in no benefit to the child. wa
s' s'n 70 Macon, ILL.,, to druggist and got
sr ,Iil SET OF the Cuticura Remedies and
,spPned as per directions, and he began
~ improve Immediately, and in about
s .aiee or four days began 10 show a
vIsnter spirit and really laughed. for
, a. time in year. In abou, ninety
. .a!a he was fully recovered, with the
s s.ssption o. a rough skin, which Is
s s,I1 disappearing, and eventually
'a ab &c replaced by healthy one.
l., rtslse for the Cuticura Remedies
. y" always been our greatest pleasure.
ny. mo there e nothing too good that we
, ,o.ua say in their favor, for they GER
"a, AMY saved our baby's life, for he was
~, ,,; most awful sight that | ever behcld.
bior 60 the treatment Of the Cuticura
remedies. Mrs, Maebelle LYON, 1925
nlas ops Ave-, Parsons, Kan, July Is,
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-05-05
CAPT. WEBSTER ATTEMPTS
TO COMMIT SUICIDE

San Francisco, May Capt. r. T..
Webster OF the Twentieth infantry. at
tempted to end his life here today by
cutting his throat. He entered a room
In the appraisers building and, taking
a bayonet from rife, succeeded in par
TALLY severing his windppe. The at.
tontion OF the guards surrounding the
building was attracted by the mans
groans, and he was placed in an ann
bulance and taken TO the Preside gem
eral hospital. The physicians IN at
tendance say the officer may recover,
but that he has not as yet regained
consciousness.
Capt. Webster, who original came
from Missouri, Is 80 years old, and has
seen 20 years OF service.
The physicians IN attendance say that
his attempt at suicide was the result
of an unbalanced mind, Capt Web
ster's command was rushed to this city
from Vancouver barracks, Wash, i'm
medlately after the catastrophe over
took this city. He had been on duty
I'm the fireswept district up TO the time
he made the attempt to end his life.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-05-05
FACTS GUARANTEED
NEURALGIA AND ANAESiIA ARE
CURED By PINK PILLS.
showing the Power nj this Wonderful
Prescription Over the Blood
And Nerves.

For nearly generation the people OF
this country have known DR.. Williams
Pink pins, during which time proof OF
thousands OF cures by this remedy has
been published and confirmed and no.
one person has been harmed I'm the
slightest degree by their use. The pills
contain no Opiate, narcotic or atimu-
liant. nor any drug which could injurc
the most delicate constitution.
Two cases In one family Is a credit
able showing as 10 the efficacy Of Or.
Williams Pink Pills IN disorders OF the
blood and nerves and the following
cases may easily be investigated by the
incredulous.
For over n year" says Miss Char
lotte Van Salisbury, OF Casteton, n.
Y, II suffered from neuralgia and pal
pitation Of the heart. Ny skin was pale
and sallow and ] vas troubled with
dizziness, fainting spells and fits Of
indigestion. l was very nervous and
would start at the slightest sound. Al
times great weakness would come
over me and on one occasion my limbs
gave way under me and | fell to the
sidewalk.
"Of course was treated by our local
physicians and also consulted a noted
doctor at lbany, nothing they gave
me seemed TO beneHt me. One day ]
read In a newspaper about DR.. vii.
ilams' Pink Pills for Pale People and
Immediately gave them a trial ! soon
felt much better and my color had be-
gun 20 return. ! continued using the
pills and by the time had taken eight
boxes ] was entirely cured.
MY sister, Sarah Van Salisbury, suf-
fered terribly from anaemia. She was
pale and thin and we feared that she
would become victim OF consumption.
She tried DR.. WilllamB' Pink Pills for
Pale People and In a short time she
began to gain IN strength and weight.
She Is now strong and well and We
both heartily recommend DR.. WI
las Pink Pills to all who are in III
health"
Dr. Williams Pink Pills are sold by
all druggists or sent postpaid. on re-
ceipt OF price, 80 cents per box, six
boxes for $3.50, by the Or, Williams
Medicine Co.. Schenectady, n. Y.
Descriptive pamphlet free on request.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-05-05

true, that having our oil at Whiting
ana desiring 10 transport II 10 points
IN the Interior Of Illinois, we used the
state rates. To say that man IN Ohio
who had never expended a dollar for
pipe line TO Whiting should be able to
transport his oil 10 an inland town In
Illinois over an all-rail line at the same
rate that We enjoyed by reason of our
pipe line must appear absurd to any
one.
1t is asserted over and over again
In the report that the Standard on
company profted by secret and UNI
lawful freight rates. Yet In the same
connection II is admitted that the re-
port that all of these rates are covered
By tariffs filed with the interstate COM
merce commission precisely as the law
provides. and therefore cannot be eth
or Secret or unlawful
COMMISSIONERS TEMERITY
THE commissioner uses the curious
phrase at one point in his report that
although tariff or a rate has been
filed with the interstate commission
In compliance with the terms OF tho
law. none but the favored shipper may
know OF its existence As the inter-
state law explicitly provides that every
tarn OF rates must be posted at every
freight station and be open IN the in
spection OF the shipper II is hard to
conceive OF the commissioner temeri-
~ In making such All utterancs.
THE statement that tho Standard Oil
company has largely by unfair and un-
lawful methods crushed out home com.
petition. Is fully answered by the fact
that home competition has always ex-
listed. is steadily growing, and tina,
50 xt...ti tttHs
refineries IN the United States,
AS TO the claim that changes IN
rates have been made since the COM
missloner's efficient work began. all
the Standard Oil company has to say IL
that any such changes have been made
without It's suggestion or efforts.
THE PRESIDENTS GRIEF.
THE grief which the president en-
presses In his message over the inabili-
~ OF the railroads to combine and pro-
tect themselvs from the shippers will
probably arouse amusement.
THE president says respecting this
investigation that the facts are not IN
dispute. only the referencese are dis
puted. The Standard OIL company fur
nished the facts. and man with "A
muck rake dug out such as under his
manipulation he felt would prove dam
aging.
THE Standard Oil company has been
investigated over and over again at the
instigation OF it's rivals. and It always
welcomes such investigation. when con-
Quoted IN good faith and fairly We
are engaged In a large and honorable
business We are conducting It honor
ably. and we sincerely believe in con-
formity to law
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-05-05
PRESIDENT C0NFERS WITH
PRESS CORRESPONDENTS.

Washington, May i.-Thirty-six
members of the corps Of Washington
corr, spondents. representing the lead
Ing daily newspapers and press associa-
lions In the United States, met Pres-
dent Roosevelt by invitation In the cab
met room of the executive Offices the
afternoon TO discuss with him the sta
tus OF railroad rate legislation and TO
learn the presidents Views as to cer-
tain pending amendments to the Hell.
burn bill The meeting lasted more
than an hour. While the president
made Il clear at the outset that he d.
sired not TO be quoted directly as TO
the Views he might express he said
that he was perfectly willing that his
views should be known and stated In
the language OF the members OF the
press who were present,
The discussion dealt chiefly with the
various propositions for court review,
from the broad amendment proposed h,
Senator Bailey OF Texas 10 the restrict
ed amendment offered by senator Long
Of Kansas. The president I'm beginning
indicated clearly and positively that
he would he satisfied With the enact
ment of the Hepburn bill as II was re-
ported 10 the senate from the commit
tee on interstate commerce. He pointed
out. however, NNhl SWIM dIN'ihNtS u
railroad rate legslation-as sincere
friends OF the legislation as he
himself was--beleved 1t would
DE wise So 20 amend the meas
ure as TO provide specifically
for n review OF the decisions or the ii,'
terstate commerce commission by the
courts.
To this end the proposition evolved
by Senator Allison OF Iowa, which now
practically has been agreed upon by
the Republicans OF the senate, was Of
fered and after consideration was ac-
cepted by the friends OF the measure,
including the president. The presiden,
expressed the opinion that the effect OF
the Allison proposition was embodied IN
tho Hepburn bill, but It also is his opln-
ion. as he stated Ii today. that II there
Is the slightest doubt that the Hepburn
bin. by Implication, does not carry the
effect az the Allison proposition, II
ought TO be incorporated explicitly In
the measure before it's enactment init
law. Personally. he favors the narrow
or restriction OF the amendment OF
Senator Long, but some other advocates
of the legislature do not favor that
amendment.
He made II clear that the judgment
of The friends OF the measure was no
evenly balanced on the question Of the
Long amendment that II was scarcely
worth while to make "a contest for II. as
a wear or two OF the laws operation
would demonstrate clearly whether Il
would be necessary further TO amend
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-05-05
$4,000 FOR SUFFERERS.

New York, May 4,-Morc than $50.
900 was realized at benefit perform
ance in aid of the san Francisco suf-
terers today at the Metropolitan Opera
House. The performance began at
1880 n. m. and continued until nearly
midnight. 1t is estimated that $4,000
persons attended. hundreds stood
waiting In line for hours The bene-
1T was under the auspices of the
Theatrical Managers association, and
II was decided that the proceeds
should go to the destitute actors and
policemen Of the stricken city.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-05-05
D0UkR0B0RS MARCHING.
They are Nude and Women and Chill
drcn are Suffering Much.

Bellngham, Wash, May "A special
TO the Herald from Van Couver Il. C.,
says hundreds of Doukhobors are
marching out from their settlements
IN the northwest IN perfectly nude con-
dition, seeking the Messiah. one OF the
periodical waves of religious mono-
mania having again swept the COM
munlty. The northwest mounted police
are making determined efforts To have
them return to their homes. The suf-
ferings OF the women and children In
the cold night air Is intense.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1906-05-05
CLEVELAND ON THE PRESS.
Good or Bad. suppose We Must
Abide the NeMspapers as They Are.'

Atlantic City. \. j.. May 4.--Former
President Grover Cleveland was the
guest OF honor tonight at the dinner
given in connection with the annual
out OF the Periodical Publishers ASSOC
citation OF America. There was present
n distinguished company OF authors,
artists and publishers, and the ex-pres-
ldent was given an enthusiastic well
come. Mr.. Cleveland In speaking OF
daily newspapers and periodicals. said
Good or bad, ! suppose We must
abide the newspapers as they are. Per-
haps, under the laws of their environ
ment, most OF them do the best they
can"
lie then made plea for conservative
periodicals.