davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28
SAINTS AND COTS WE'RE TANGLED
IN INEXTRICABLE CONFUSION.

SAINTS AND COTS WE'RE TANGLED
IN INEXTRICABLE CONFUSION.
venge. The sewed-up bottoms of their
robes prevented their locomotion, and
all they could do was to scramble to
their feet and tumble down again, fight
ing all the time like demons in bags.
Each thought himself the victim Of q
joke upon the part Of his neighbor, and
was fully determined to get even for the
unseemly meddling with his sacred
probobscis.
Frightened at the unexpected work
ings of his inventions, the clerk endeav-
ored to escape in the darkness, but only
succeeded in getting into the very midst
Of the melee, where he speedily found
himself beaten and rolled on scandal
ously.
Two saints, finding that he had not
on q robe, held him fast and shouted to
the rest, who speedily suspended hos
tilities. The lantern was relighted, and
in spite of the struggles and remon-
strances of the inventor he was held by
two brothers, while others snapped the
nose holders onto his ears, nose, lips
and fingers.
A rope was produced, and, to the
clerks terrified eyes, it seemed as if
they were about to hang him. Strength
ened by fear, he jerked away from tho
saints who held him, rushed against and
over two of the brethren, and burst
headlong through the side of the tent
wholly ignoring the opening provided
for egress.
AS we'll as they could, the ascension
lists hoped and tumbled outside and
saw the clerk disappearing with the
speed of a quarter-horse and shedding
nose pins at every jump.
Presently he went out of sight in the
moonlight, in the direction of the Duffy
house, and the 81 bagged saints returned
to their cots to await the end of the
world.-Good Literature.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28

Athens, Greece, the home OF tho
famous Olympic games has only II
automobiles, and three Of these belong
TO- the king and the princes. The
kings is a luxurious affair and cost
him 10000 francs. The one owned by
Prince Andreas was presented to, him
by the car Of Russia. Foreign auto.
mobiles are classed by the Greek tar
1T law as four-wheeled carriages,
whether used or unused, and are re-
Quired by the government TO pay Z
duty Of 300 francs.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28

Prince Charles, Of Denmark, who on
the Invitation of the Storthing, backed
BY plebiscite, became the sovereign
Of Norway. is the second son Of the
crown prince of the Danish kingdom.
His mother was Swedish princess
and his wife is the Princess Maud, Of
England, a daughter Of King Edward
VII. The prince Is about 80 years old.
and both he and the princess are per-
sonally popular. He will ascend the
throne under the title Of. King Haakon
VII, good name for him to assume,
- Haako0 vi. was one OF the most
hooored heroes OF that country.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28
soha OF BA1DHEADED NAN.

Great Caesars classic head was barr.
And likewise Socrates;
Peter and Paul were forced to wear rs
Thin capillary deeces: ~ Sax
Shakespeare, earth's literary king,
And johnson, Pope and Gtbbon.
Being short of hirsute covering
Wore wigs tied deft with ribbon.
But Acham, J. Iscariot,
Ananias (of truth chary),
Herod, the Pharisees wot, .e,
All sported caputs hairy:
Later came Danton, Robesp1erre.
And Marat, bloody trio;
Guy Fawkes and Jeffries, Glencoe Stair,
Thick-thatched like fddling Nero.
Nor will the eye, in sooth, oft see
Bald Hottentot or Arab. .-
Kamchatkan. aboriginee,
Kurd or man-eating Carib:
Nay, nay, but Of the human breed
The greater in earth's story,
Are those who lead in thought and ICED
Crowned not with hair, but glory!
Monroe Guy Carleton, in N. Y. sua.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28

The crop-estimating board Of the
bureau Of statistics puts the average
Of corn per acre in Kentucky at 29.7
bushels for 1905, as compared with
26.9 last year, and 25.6 as the average
for the last ten years. AS the aver
age for the whole country this year
Is 2S.S, and for the past ten years
24.9, Kentucky appears above the av'
erage as corn-growing state. The
highest average in any state this year
was 40.7 bushels for Indiana; the low.
est 1919 bushels for South Carolina.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28
He CLASPED THE COMPRESSORS
ON THE BILLS OF THE SAINTS.

HE CLAsPED THE COMPREsSORS
ON THE BILLS OF THE SAINTS.
the invention except upon his own nose.
where it worked to his intense satisfac-
ton, and nearly pinched his beak of
at the same time.
Conceiving the idea that the ordinary
springs were too modest in asserting
themselves, he substituted springs so
strong that it took pronounced pressure
upon the opposite ends of the holder to
open them for the reception of the wait
ing proboscis.
For several days before the compile
ton of the invention, the clerk had had
his mental vision fixed on the subjects
for wholesale experiment. These were
several of the most prominent followers
Of Elder Blowhorn and the doctrines by
him taught at the camp, just out Of
town.
BY some means, the clerk had learned
that, owing to the limited number of
sleeping-tents, and the unexpected ar
rival u large delegation of believers
from other localities, a number of the
brethren were obliged to pass the night
on cots in the large audience tent in
which services were held in the day.
time. It was upon the noses of this COL
lection of saints the clerk resolved to
experiment.
Not that they lacked in health or mus
cularity, for most Of them looked as If
they had a decided hankering after the
aesh-pots of Egypt: but because he
wanted to ascertain the different effects
upea df6erent individuals and noses,
10 that the tension of the springs might
b increased OK diminished to suit all
requirements.
Several different days had been sst
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28
IMPROVING THE FIGURE.
Average Woman Has Formed Habits
That Tend to Such Defect as
One High Shoulder or Hip.

You girls who are working to over
come the unevenness of hips and
shoulders must Investigate the indi-
vidual cause Of the trouble. Nothing
is more common cause than the habit
of incorrect standing, throwing the
weight of the body upon one foot and
leg. But many cases of crookedness
are brought about by some odd habit
all your own. For instance, one cor
respondent writes that she always
wears long skirts in the street and in
variably holds the skirt to raise it from
the ground with the right hand. This
habit may have done a great deal to
twist her. II you will not wear a short
walking skirt, take pains to change
hands often when lifting your train.
Horseback riding, as it has been
practiced-that is, with a side saddle
has done its share Of damage. One
physician prescribed a, saddle made for
the geyerse position, bringing the stir
rup on the opposite side from the usual
one.
Carrying school books or parcels al
ways in one arm, especially when they
are held against the hip, throws the
body into one-sided position.
In the Introduction of vertical writ
ing into schools, much has been said
of the benefit gained from it's forcing
the child to sit straight, facing the
desk directly, instead of sitting in the
diagonal fashion customary with slant
ing penmanship. This position has en-
couraged unevenness of shoulders and
hips.
So you must study your own case
to discover whether you are not in
some way twisting yourself out of
shape; then, when you have discov-
cred the cause, do away with it prompt
", besides taking exercises to correct
your figure.
In simple, standing exercises, it is
important that you have one hand on
tho hip, the other clasped about the
neck. The hand on the hip belongs
to the high side; the other, lifted to
the neck, raises the entire side, hip,
shoulder and all, along with it, and
so corrects the fault. The high hip
is usually the right one, but your case
may differ.
Starting with this position, you may
use an infinite number of exercises
that you have practiced before; those
which stretch and bend the spine are
the most profitable. Go through these
exercises, giving yourself short rests
between; during these rests you may
let the arms fall at the sides while you
take deep breaths.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28

To those who are interested in the
growth Of a millionaire's riches-and
who of US Is not ?-the following state.
ment Of Mr.. Rockefeller's progress up
the ladder of wealth ought to be en-
tightening. His fortune in the years
indicated is given in dollars: 1855, nil;
1866, $1,000; 1870, $4,000; 1875, ST.
900, 1000; 1885, $4,000, 900; 1890, $780,.
100000; 1900, $2So,oooooo. To-day, as
nearly as can be estimated, this king
of Croesuses is worth at least $780,.
600 900, or, roughly eSO,OOOOO0.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28

for the end Of the world, and they had
awaited its coming with all the anxiety
felt by spectators around a sick horse.
But as each date had failed to witness
the interesting event, they grew appre-
hensive that it might walk in upon them
at any time.
All day long their ascension robes
hung on handy nails, and at night they
slept in them.
In order that the rush of wind, con-
seQuent upon so many people going up
at once, might not blow their robes up
over their heads, the garments were
sewed together at the bottom, making
of each a long bag with sleeves In it.
When the clerk, with his half-bushel
or SO of nasal-pinchers, arrived at the
big tent, just before midnight, he found
81 saints sleeping within, each in his
ascension bag, and with his face up
turned to the dim light of the solitary
lantern. The inventor fairly Rugged
himself with delight at the fattering
prospects Of a successful wholesale ex-
pertinent.
AS noiselessly as spook, he tiptoed
from cot to cot, clasping the compressors
on the bills of the saints.
He had hardly retired to the pulpit,
to watch the effects of the experiment,
before the inventions began to get in
their particularly fine work. The
mouths Of the sleepers few open in one
grand snore. A moment later, the
pinching of his beak aroused one of the
more wakeful sleepers, and finding his
nose in the grasp Of some imaginary
demon, he sprang up in alright,
tumbled down, and knocked over and
extinguished the lantern. AZ
The rumpus aroused the others, who,
feeling their beaks in the clutches OF
something, and thinking that at last the
long expected occasion had arrived and
Satan was already endeavoring to drag
them off, leaped up with loud cries, and
endeavored to rush out where they could
go straight up without having to cut
holes in the tent. ~
In q moment they were all down, and
saints and cots were tangled in mex
tricable confusion. Then, as it dawned
upon each that the object upon his bill
was large clothes-pin, he forgot his
desire to ascend in his thirst for re-
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28
AMONG THE LITERAT1.

One thousand four hundred and
twenty-five characters are described
In the "a books written by Charles
Dickene.
The rule followed by editors of both
the Oxford and Cambridge Chronicles IN
the position of the letters A. NJ. and M.
A., for the title master of arts, is that
where the context is in Latin the form
is A. M, and where it is English, M. A.
The real name of Gabrielle d'Annnn-
zio, the Italian novelist, is Rapagnetta.
His father-in-law was Due De Gallese,
Frenchman who received permission to
take that title on marrying the widow
of a former duke. The author is now
trying to obtain divorce.
Once q year or so William Dean
Howells, the distinguished novelist,
drops into the ONCE of the Ashtabula
CO., Sentinel, rolls up his sleeves and
sets type for half an hour. Mr.. Howells
began his career as printers appren-
tice in the Sentinel Office, which was
then owned by his father. His knowl-
edge of typesetting has been of immense
value to him in his literary career.
John Kendrick Bangs, the author, who
for some years has been dividing his
time between Yonkers and New York, is
soon to become countryman again. Il
have blue-penciled city life," he said,
recently. my eye Is on farm in New
England, where hope before long to be
able to provide an appreciatlve 2Hblic
with limited editions of SQUAD chickens,
large paper turkeys and deckle-edged
eggs. And" he added, slyly. no item
in either class will go out without my
signature" u.
Miss Alice French chose her pen name
Of Octave Thanet in curious fashion.
Octave was the name of one Of her
schoolmates and was selected because it
gives no hint as to whether the person
who bears it is man or a woman.
Thanet was adopted from passing rail-
road car that Miss French CHANGED to
see and is pronounced with the accent
on the second syllable. Born and edu-
Gated in New England, the writer has
lived most of her mature life in the west
and in the south, which has made her
familiar with widely varying phases Of
American civilization. Her first maya
zine story was written and accepted in
1878
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28

Lady Mary Hamilton, daughter OF
the late duke Of Hamilton, has just
come OF age, and becomes mistress Of
Q fortune that makes her the richest
heiress in the United Kingdom. For
nine years the vast riches left by the
duke to his daughter have been in
trust, accommodating at compound In
terest, and Lady Mary now has an in
come estimated in excess Of $1,000, 900
agar. She has 10000 acres Of land,
Including the whole of the island Of
Aaran, and a magnificent estate in
Suffolk.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28

. Engineers who run through the
western part Of Oklahoma tell some
great stories about the way in which
quail are killed by coming in contact
With their engines, and claim to have
4 bunch Of them on the pilot at the
end Of every run. One Choctaw fire.
man has evolved a scheme to fix up a
net on the front of his locomotive and
catch the birds as they come against
t. He AYERS that hundreds can be
caught in that way every day.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28
THE NOSE
HOLDERS
By +. p. MORGAN

r HIRTY-ONE saints in bags. A suf-
fering sinner with huge spring
clothes-pin snapped onto each ear, one
on his nose, another on his lower lip,
several hanging from his fingers, and
twice as many more without places to
hang on.
The victim of the clothes-pin was tho
inventive clerk of the Duffy house. The
saints in bags were the 81 most prom
inent members of Elder Blowhorn's fol-
lowing.
Besides being clad in bags, the saints
were adorned by numerous abras1ons
and bruises, caused by: the events that
followed the practical application, of the
clerks little invention for causing In
voluntary snoring.
After prolonged and unique reasoning,
the clerk proved to his own satisfaction
that snoring was greatly conducive to
the preservation of health. His theory
was simple enough, too. From careful
observation, he had learned that the
more robust the person, the more lusty
and resonant was his snore. Weak per-
sons snored in q weak, coy way, as II
they had not learned to play on their
nose harps very we'll. But the stalwart
ones, strong of wind and sturdy Of torso,
would utter a few preliminary diapason
notes, run up and down the scale
couple of times, and then, striking the
proper key, dash into the popular tune
Of II am dreaming of thee, Nora,
darling"
Following out this line of reasoning,
the clerk very soon reached the con-
clusion that, In order for weak ones to
become healthier, they must snore
more. If they would not snore, they
must be made to.
Ere long, the clerks little invention
for the promotion Of involuntary snor-
ing was complete. It was modelled after
and very much resembled the pinching
variety Of clothes-pin, which, when it
SEXES anything, hangs on with the
tenacity Of snapping-turtle.
All that is necessary to make Sleep
er snore is to cause him to breathe
through his mouth. The idea was that,
when one of these nose holders was
snapped on the victims bill, he would
either breathe through his mouth or
choke. And, If he breathed through his
facial cash, he would snore, and the util-
ity of the clerks little invention would
be demonstrated.
So pleased was the clerk with his idea
that he constructed nearly half a bushel
of nose holders before he made trial of
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28
USEFUL CASE FOR LETTERS
This Receptacle Is Very Easily Con-
structed-May Prove sugges-
tive for Little Gilt.

This is a simple example Of q very use
full article to hold letters and cards that
might otherwise lie about in an "utidy
way and be lost. The foundation con-
sists of two pieces of cardboard each nine
inches long, one six inches deep, the
othsr four inches. These are covered
with silk, cloth or linen, a. preferred,
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28
A CLASS PRESIDENT
VARIOUS REASONS WHY PAR
TICULAR GIRL IS CHOSEN.

The Popular School Girl Does Not
Make Unlucky Speeches-She Is
Quick to Understand People-The
Successful Leader Among Girls
Must Possess Charm and Initiative
She Must Be Able to Engineer
q Meeting with Ease and arace-
Extra Work Her Penalty for tho
Honor.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28
DIVERSE DEFINITIONS.

A snob is superficial figure consist
ing of nothing but side.
A half sheet Of note paper has posi-
ton and magnitude, but no weight.
A legal joke is that which possesses
length and breadth, but is without
point.
A speech may be delivered at any
length, on any subject, at any distance
from that subject.
A sermon is the longest distance be-
tween two points, namely, the point at
which it begins and the point at which
it leaves off.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28

Col. John Jacob Astor owns 20 au.
tomobdles certainly worth not less
than 500. 900, that cost him $4,000 to
maintain yearly, which includes the
hiring of his operators, fuel and re-
pniIV.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28

In tho city Of London court the 9TH
q day Judge Rentoul, X. c., made an
order to pay a debt of e 10 So 10d to
q money lender at the rate Of one
penny month. The payment will be
completed in 2O9 years.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28

Consul-General Guenther, Of Frank
tort, Germany, reports cure for can
cor. According to German expert
ments made with sun rays upon cancer
q considerable number of well. estab-
lished and wellauthenticated cures
have been recorded.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28

Eastern capital is preparing to build
IN electric railway from Portland 10
Roseburg. Ore, by way Of Salem and
Eugene. At the last named point it is
proposed to connect with what is said
to be ultimately a transcontinental
line, backed by the same interests.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28

One Of the courts In Paris is occu'
pied with a case against q picture
dealer who sold what he asserted was
q genuine Raphael for $4,000. The
buyer paid $4,000 down, then discov.
cred that the dealer had bought the
picture for 20 francs He wants his
$4,000 back. But three experts have
pronounced the painting genuine.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28
Chicago shipped the largest single
cargo Of grain. consisting Of 235,000
bushels OF corn and $1,000 bushels Of
barley. ,.

The American Tin Can company,
better known as the "Tin Can Trust"
u planning to erect at New Orleans
one Of the largest plants Of its kind
In the United States.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28

Darwin estimates that there are
100000 earthworms quietly at work
for the advantage OF the upper six
feet OF every acre Of good soil. They
continually turn over the soil and
drag down leaves and grass, and thus
they loosen the soil and fertilize the
ground, go that necessary air can
reach the roots that spread and grow.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28

Along the central port of the Kongo
river there are a number OF salt
marshes. The Africans dig shallow
holes in these, whence issus streams
Of hot water, which, on being evapo-
rated. leaves a residue of salt.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28

and edged with fancy galloon, gold lace,
or embroidery. Two pointed pieces four
inches long and two inches VIDE ut the
top form ends, which must be neatly
sewn in. Ribbon with bows form . loon
by which the rocket 10 suspen6oa
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28

Emperor William has ordered that
all his chauffeurs must be total alb
stainers.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1905-12-28

But should you ask me what At
tribute in a girl will helm her to be
most successfully president Of her
class, think will pick out this be-
yond every other. She must have
what we call initiative. That is she
must be able to suggest new lines, 10
strike out in new paths, and to con-
vince the other girls that her ideas
are good. A girl who is q slave to
system, who cares principally how
things look, and is in terror about
what people viii say, il not girl with
1nifaa&tyA
The Southern farm gazette. (Starkville, Miss.) 1895-1909, 1905-05-01

pens, rightfully claiming tha,
uniformity ~ OF great value in
ia the marketing OF either fowls
or eggs. And this il very ap.
parent in the metropolitan mar.
kets and also slightly in cvi.
dcncc 10 the local markets: and
the distinction between the uni.
for and the mixed il growing
greater each year, 40 much so in
fact that IL ! good sound policy
TO Gull them all and make all
fioeks a. uniform az possible.
When cuil,ng. il il a good plan
To have a good clean pen where
the culls III be pu, and ia,icn-
cd for at icas, two weeks before
marketing. While the tattening
IL going on, find customers who
r willing to pay tho difference
IN price between we'll fattcncd.
clean birds and those usually
piled upon the market. Il in
surprising how easily this can be
done. Once this plan in
adopted. IL will always be kept
up. both by buyers and sellers.
AZ il gives mutual satisfaction.
The Southern farm gazette. (Starkville, Miss.) 1895-1909, 1905-05-01
Rearing Turkeys.

Having received a number OF
inquiries regarding the setting
and care OF turkeys and having
had very little experience along
this line. the following sugIes-
tons arc selected from the pen
OF one OF the most skilled turkey
growers in the country. They
sound sensible TO us. and no
doubt will prove of interest and
value TO the parties concerned
ia the rearing OF this great
American bird.
The manner of handling the
turkey hens and little poul,s
when the poults hatch and
during the ten DAYS that immc.
diately follow depends consider.
The Southern farm gazette. (Starkville, Miss.) 1895-1909, 1905-05-01
Abcrdccn. M,ss. Jan. q Il oS.

Aberdeen, Mas Jan. 9-lI OS.
loyds Haired Plymouth Rocks
Won ns9rc At prizes than all other
competitors combined.
lat. breeding Pen 1861.
iss. CoSkc'i p4's !ih cockl.
lat. Pultrs a1t..
md. puilc; 9sg.
viii sell u iltnttrn number of eggs
from the lat pen At ~. % n set. Of ~
eggs
This Pen II headed by tChampionl
lat cr-al a. Aberdeen. This bird
was pronounced hs Judge Brown 10 be
aluso., an idcai Il T.. X. The rcn
atli contain tho I females from, ,st
pen at Aberdeen. and I other females
os equal mrri, and samc breeding.
! consider this 10 be ono os the strong.
CT exhibition pens in tho South and
look for ssSfsc fine youngsters from
them.
Ten t@u. headed by Osborn Chief
4ih cuski \, Aberdeen mated 10 ten
good females. wcii barred. with nice
yellow legs and bcaks. and all ovcr
standard weight. To the man want.
ing good market chickens combining
heavy laying. | would recommend this
pen.
will sell a few eggs from this pen
Al ~1nn a setting Of IS egg.
W. W. Hoyn. NJ ID.
Osborn, Miss