The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1905-05-04
AN ILLUSION

used to think that she wished me to
marry Margaret Deane. who knew how
to sew and cook and do lot of practi
cal things in which l took no interest
l rather admired Gwendolin German.
Gwendolin was tender flower, just
such ii girl as man likes to take I'M
der his protection. Her cheek was not
round and rosy, but there was little
pale red in its center like \ rosebud
painted on china cup, with lips of the
same hue.
The time came when l made up my
mind that unless l could win Gwendo-
lin my life would be a failure. was
but twenty. and that's very young for
man to feel that his happiness is
bound up for life in one person. How
ever. proved my consistency by years
of devotion 10 the image l had set up
in my heart. Fearing that | could not
express myself with sufficient delicacy
% impress one SO young. SO modest, SO
tender. wrote my proposal in a letter.
was several days composing it, and
when finished left it for another day
on my desk in order to read it once
more before posting it.
l was suddenly called away, and
when | returned the letter was gone.
I asked my mother what had become
of it. and she said that it had been
posted with batch of letters that had
been sent to the mail while l was
away from home. With this l was
content and confident that Gwendolin
had received it and waited .anxiously
for a reply.
When met my love again l was
much embarrassed. My imagination
made her seem to me cold. even Of
Tended. and as she made no reference
to my letter it occurred to me that for
some reason-I imagined n dozen-she
was displeased with my proposal. re-
manned with her but a few moments
yainly endeavoring to converse on tri-
fics, then left her.
did not call again. and within year
her family left the place where lived.
| and she went with them. My heart
| went with her. lived on bachelor.
/! My mother frequently invited Mar
saret Deane to our house, and l could
see that she was Intentionally placing
her i'll my way. Margaret accepted
whatever attention l gave her. which
was not much, but when was I'M
mindful of her she did not seem to
notice it. AS the year passed made
friend of her, but it did not occur to
me to make love to her.
When was thirty my mother died.
Before her death she made me a con-
fession.
my dearest boy" she said. before
l die l wish your forgiveness. Ten
years ago saw that. you We're about
to choose Il companion for life who
would not make you happy. kept the
letter YOU wrote to Gwendolin Ger
main. hoping to gain time to direct
your attention to Margaret Deane Ten
years have passed. and every year
have intended to send your letter to
Gwendolin. | have never done so till
today. BY tomorrow morning she will
know for the first time of your pro-
posal. but by that time l shall have
left you free to choose for yourself"
And SO my mother. to whom I was
so devoted, had caused me ten years Of
misery. forgave her and did not
utter word Of complaint. Indeed the
pain suffered at her loss neutralized
any feeling OF regret for my long suf-
fering.
The day after laid her in the grave
took up number Of letters that had
accumulated-mestly of coincidence
and among them was one from Gwen
dolin. 1t brought the first of different
sensations from what had experienced
since the beginning of my mothers
illness. But with it came the remem-
brance of what my mother must have
endured from her distaste for smy
choice Margaret had been with her
constantly in her last days and had
comforted her as if she had been her
own daughter.
felt an inclination to complete the
, sacrifice my mother had brought about
by acceding to her wishes and giving
Margaret the option Of being my wife.
| But | was bound III honor to Gwendo-
lin rs well as by love- In her letter she
. asked me to come and see her if felt
50 inclined. since she would talk to me
rather than write.
, A few days later went to see her
| She still lived with her family, who
were wealthy-more so than when |
! had parted from her-in stately man
sion. 1t was evening when l called,
and l was ushered into private par.
lor. In few minutes bopy. sallow
scrawny woman came into the room
dressed in the height of fashion. be.
decked with jewels, her hands covered
with rings. / barely recognized Gwen
dolin and would not have done SO had
she not preserved the rosebud in hel
cheek by a touch of paint
t $50 your poor mother has gone" she
said. what a silly thing to keep your
r letter from me! Just as If l were
4 counting on you. You were lovely as q
boy. admit; but, you know, papa has
; always brought me up to understand
that ! must marry money, and OF
course that would not include you. But
0 we can be friends. you know. Just
] now I'm without cavalier-that is
one that / fancy-and you must come
!. often and vosy shall bo INV ofto,,5ar<