New-York tribune., 1905-07-02
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

A woman has been elected as local magistrate in
the commune of Rank Herlin. Hungary. because
the whole adult male population of the place had
emigrated to America and there was not single
man left to fill the position.
Mr.. Punch. as a gallant supporter of womans
suffrage protests against the argument employed by
another supporter. who writes as follows in con-
temporary and signs herself "A Mere Woman
From personal observation am convinced that
a large number of lunatics possess a vote. do
lowed the privilege. ."-{London Punch
TT was 'grog' Of course and not mere liquor
from which Admiral Dewey was reported to have
been debarred by doctors orders, comments a
writer in THE Chicago News 'Grog' has al
ways been more particularly used to signify sail
or's spirits and water, since 1t after a sailor
that 1t was originally called. Admiral Edward Yer
non. ordered in 1740 that his should dilute
their with water instead of taking 1t neat,
farniIiarly known as Old Grog. from his habit of
wearing breeches or, as have It, bad
weather cloak made of the stuff called grogran
(from French gros grain. coarse grainD. Nat
urally, rum and water to be called grog.'
likewise, being 'two-water' three-water grog,
according to the proportions of the mixture"
DAD"
Some boys the, call their Dad,,Papa. Dad,
Oh a gee = That hfse< makes max In me mad podk
You bet call mine Dad.
And nd he's eav ri ripper Pts tqq sbsy you Sa6 bet
A father that would laugh and joke.
And love them like my Dad
OF course, sometimes. when all the bills
Come in he's mighty mad.
And then we sit as still as mice
And hear him jaw. poor Dad.
It's always over soon, and then
You bet all feel glad.
And hug and kiss our Dad
.You can't have kids and money too"
He says, and he's glad
The good Lord made him poor, else
He righn't been our Dad.
1 don't want to be President.
When I'm grown up I'D rather be
a nice just like Dad
-(May Kelly in Lippincott's Magazine.
A Philadelphia lawyer who has telephone on
four party wire in his house had a recent expert
ence of human curiosity. On such telephone
arrangement any ali of the four subscribers
may hear any conversation If they wish to caves
drop. The lawyers wife suspected of the
neghbors of eavesdroppng. Saturday" said the
lawyer "she held prearranged conversation over
the telephone with me. and suddenly shut me off.
She explained that of her neighbors caves
dropping, and that she intended TO have the thing
stopped know the woman WELL she said. and
the next time she speaks to I'll insult her.
Later my wife explained that she could tell the
culprlt when she avoided her Next day We went
to church to make the test and met awful shock
Not of three neighbors on the party line
noticed us, although they had always been very
friendly My wife found the culprits al right, but
she had neglected to figure the natural curiosity
of all women"
Isaac Newton had just been struck the head
by the falling apple,
Having Formulated the theory of gravtation he
proceeded TO philosophize further.
What Il fortunate thing" he said. that my en-
vironment not such to tempt to seek
shade under a cocoanut palm! And what wise
provision of nature il is that prevents watermeons
from growing trees. s.'-tW Washington Star.
Hannibal Mo-. is the home of man named F. A.
Ahrenhausternaummerm For short. peo-
pie generally drop the last syllable OF his name
BIZ had a billboard. Bill also had a board bill
The board bill bored Bill that Bill sold the bill
board to pay his board bill. So after Bill sold his
billboard to pay his board bill the board bill
longer bored Eill-aYale Expositor.