The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1905-02-23
MEMS COLUMN
Men ought to know that:

gracefully asks ner LOT KIDD, pu' sho
would like him much better if he took
one without asking for it.
"A girl often makes great show OF
resistance so her lover will force her
to do things she wants to do.
1t is an unnatural girl that can't
say yes without speaking the word.
The way to grapple your sweet
heart to you with hooks of steel, is to
make her believe you are lying awake
nights for fear some other fellow will
get her away from you.
No husband in the world is quite
as good as his wife tries to make her
self believe he is.
Babies break more family jars
and save more family jars than all
other sources combined.
If boys were as good as their
grandmothers think they are, angels
would not be in the same class with
them.
A girl often wishes she could
change places with her lover 80 she
could show him how to do a good job
of counting.
"A woman without a temper is as
insipid as cider manufactured out OF
dried apples.
If men could manage women as
easily as women can manage men
there would be mighty few domestic
troubles in the world.
"A man with massive mustache
can make more impression on most
girls than a man with massive
intellect.
Women often cry just for the
pleasure of having some man dry
their tears.
Call girl lamb and she likes it,
call her heifer and she gets as mad
as a rail, yet heller is by far the
more pretty and graceful of the two.
"A girl just loves to get angry over
things she likes to be teased about.
Short walking skirts will never
become universal till all women
possess pretty feet.
"A weak man, weak will and a
weak hug are three things no daughter
of Eve can tolerate.
"A girl is never ashamed of her big
mouth if it is filled with pretty teeth.
"A baby boy always gets Rugged
and kissed twice as much by women
as baby girl.
Whether young lady is fond of
cigar smoke or not always depends
on the man behind the cigar.
Many more women would dissi-
pate than they do now if it was not so
hard on the complexion.
Many a man has won a woman's
heart by simply being picturesqe.
"A mother will nurse her boys
black eye which he got in a fight very
tenderly if he gave the boy he fought
with, two black eyes.
"A woman never loves until she is
conquered.
"A wife never fails to respect hus-
band who respects himself.
Men thieves steal something to
eat, smoke or drink. Women thieves
steal something to wear.
The reason that there are not more
women proficient in the arts and
sciences is because they spend so
much of their time in learning the
names and uses of the mysterious
things they use as articles of apparel.
Mighty fewwomen ever turn state's
evidence.
If women suffrage were universal,
masculine beauty would become the
greatest of political issues.
"A woman does not mind if her
husband whips her once in awhile il
he is able to whip all the other men
in the country.
There would be no trouble about
women keeping a secret if the people
she tells them to would only keep
still.
Girls with languishing eyes don It
wear spectacles.
Men become extravagant to crafty
their vices. Women become extrava-
CANT to crafty their follies.
If calico skirts had the same swish
as silk most women would wear calico.
If a woman financier does not
ruin herself she ruins everyone with
whom she does business.
One of the reasons that women
are so universally religious is because
all church objects of alteration are of
the masculine gender.