The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-10

Your hair is coming out on top. sir"
s.Good.'' exclaimed Pepprey. II knew it
was in me. Now, for goodness sake. don't
talk TO it or it will crawl back AGAIN. -
Philadelphia Press.
And when you told him I was, mar
ried,'' said the girl who had Tilted him.
did he seem to worry p
YES replied the other. che said he was
very sorry-although he didn't know the
man scnally."-Philadelphia Ledger
Bracket, it appears. was unable to get
into any of the college fraternities. Why
.'oh. I guess the boys didn't like him be-
cause he studied SO hard that his pitching
games when he was in the box. Chicago
Record Herald
IT understand Col. James is a fatalist.'
You're right thar, stranger! He never :
fails to git his man."-New Orleans Times
Democrat
Senator steele-I want $4,000 for that
Railway Magnate-You won't get the
tenth part OF IT, Senators are going to jail
now for for s2o9f This b Is bear market for
You went fishing yesterday with Mr..
Multimillyuns, didn't your
rs he much of a fisherman"
No. A mere novice. had to bait the
What bait did you. user"
Myself. Cleveland Plain Dealer.
First Magazine Editor-Why do you
have so many blood medicine ads in your
Second Magazine Editor-To improve its
circulation.-San Francisco Call.
night. Did you like it? was 1t goodv
Wicks-I don't know. haven't read the
criticisms in the morning papers yet
Say, father what is a 'nobody'?"
"A nobody. my son, is prominent wo-
sne-Here is a wonderful thing. They're
actually growing potatoes and tomatoes on
He-Nothing so very wonderful about
| that. Cabbage and tobacco have long been
grown that way.-Philadelphia Bulletin.
Solomon explained his magic carpet 1T
doesn't show If I forget to wipe my feet
he announced Considering the number Of
Mrs. s. s. this was indeed an advantage
Harper's Bazaar.
out at your house2
submissive quarts of good old Scotch
Citiman-Was that all?
Subbubs-Yes; you see only about half
of our volunteer fire company got there
Philadelphia Press.
she-How sweet of you to own that you
He (absent mindedly)-Yes, mother al
ways taught me that it was easier to give
| in to a woman than argue with her.-De-
| troit Free Press.
Now would be a good time for naval
battle between Russia and Switzerland.
But Switzerland hasn't any navy"
81 know; that's why it would be q nice
even thing. Houston Post.
| The courage of ones convictions is an
! excellent thing, but it should never be al
| lowed to become unyoked from the discre-
| ton of ones reason--Pnck-
Mag-Are youse sure yer husband loves
youse?
Lil-Why, cert. He's shot at me twict.
| set fire to de house onct, an puts poison
in me coffee every time 1 looks at anud-
der man.-Louisville Couries-Journal.
There's joy enough to keep the whole
| world dancing"
yes. but they'll turn you out of church
for it,
''Wen. you kin holIer halleluia, on the
highway"
yes. but they'll arrest you for disturb
! in the Qeace!
| Don't seem to be any hope for your
| "Oh, yes: You kin be jest as miserable
| as you please!'-Atlanta Constitution.
GIadys-Oh. papa. I think I shall break
| the engagement. have discovered that
| Jack plays-plays the races!
| Father-Gad, how you shocked me! I
thought you were going to say that he
| played the piano!-Puck.