davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
THE LESSON HE FORGOT.

The Grand Duke Alexis. Nho mas
inst ..resiened" as the head Of the
Russian admiralty, because OF the
proven incompetency of the Russian
/ navy. has evidently forgotten the les
son we tried to teach him when ne
visited Topeka some thirty odd years
lago. If he had remembered that ana
acted accordingly, the outcome OF the
battle of the Sea of Japan might have
been different. This is warning TO
other princes and potentates to heeo
what we tell them.
1t was no less a parsonage than the
Honorable P. P. Elder of Ottawa, VINO
undertook to instill the lesson in the
mind of the grand duke, according TO
the legend that has come down the
years from the time the story was
first told by the late Noble Prentis-
Governor Elder has of late years mod
estly denied it, but the story ought to
be true if it isn't
The grand duke. who was then a
young man, was touring America. and
Topeka entertained him. There were
parades and banquets in his honor. On
the menu at one of the latter was the
states motto, lad Astra per Aspera.'
The genial lieutenant governor, &C
cording to the legend, sat next to His
Royal Highness. At one point in the
proceedings. Governor Elder nudged
Mr.. Alexis with his elbow, and, point
ing to the phrase, said:
"Dook, them words is Latin. They
mean that you kin git to the top only
by mighty hard chbmin." or words
to that effect.
That is the lesson which the Grand
Duke Alexis evidently failed to re-
member. If he had pasted it in the
top of his hat, Russia might be a diff
ferent nation today. In fact, the his
tory of the Orient might have been
greatly changed.
If, as the head of the Russian naval
department, the Grand Duke Alexis
had remembered the significance of
that Latin phrase and had compelled
those under him to realize that only
by hard work and constant drill could
a good navy be secured, the Russian
fleet might have amounted to some
thing. An example of that kind would
also have done much to inspire sim
liar action in the other departments
of the government. And so it is not
difficult to prove that Russia is today
a wreck because a grand duke forgot
the lesson Kansan once taught him
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
RAILROAD DISASTERS.

There is too much ground for the
belief that the appalling slaughter on
American railroads is due more to lax
discipline than to any lack of mechan-
icaI contrivances. It is notorious that
time and again engineers, for example,
have not been punished for disregard
ing railway regulations and that man
agements have winked at these VIOLA
tons if they resulted in making time.
Employees have been encouraged in
taking these chances which so often
result disastrously. Moreover, neither
managers nor employees are made to
suffer by law for disaster demonstra bly,
due to negligence or disobedience. All
the safety appliances that human in
genuity can devise will be of no avail
unless railway men in all positions are
held to stricter personal accounta-
bility than is the case at present.
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
QUAKER REFLECTIONS

[From the Philadelphia Recordl
Hope springs eternal in the old maids
breast.
There are lots of good fish in the sea Of
nnatrinony.
All men may be born equal. but they soon
find their level
When the devil is hard pressed he calls
on the hypocrites.
Even the fellow with liberal education
may be close listed.
It doesn't take e particularly strong wo-
man to hold a man I'D to ridicule.
Blobbs2stThat Chicago woman says she
was born to command. . Slobbs-sT guess
she was: she has had six husbands"
We build our castles in the air.
Which fancy lightly crowns.
And then sit back and just prepare
To have our ups and downs.
Mrs Muggins-.' neYrichs little girl
has a decided irish brogue.'' Mrs Buggins
That's what comes OF having French
maids"
That he laughs best who laughs last,
I do not quite believe.
The chap has never been surpassed
Who lausheth in his sleeve.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
GLOBE SIGHTS.
IFrom the Atchison Globe.l

TETOm the AIcQlSOn 1lODG.I
When a German gets stubborn, pienlpo-
tentiaries won't do any good
There are enough wise men on earth TO
save some people from the Fool Killer.
The country women, thrifty though they
are. will buy bakers bread for harvest
hands.
We may not have much taste. but we
prefer Arkansas peaches to California
Lots of your friends persevere in this
attitude toward you: If you don IKE II
get over it.
one of the most pitiful things in town is
a man who is dying, but who IS apie TO
walk feebIy on the streets at intervals.
A certain man over in Missouri is sick
A neighbor informed US today that ne mas
been 4'gfven OUT by all the doctors.
A Subscriber writes this office: What
is Love-" Isn't that rather an indelicate
question to ask of young person IKE US :!
There are times in every mans lie Wnen
he would like to go out on a Wild pralIle
and howl and howl. and howl' OUT the
most of them don't admit It.
When a man loafs around for years ana
wears good clothes and always mas ldIe
time on hands. see If he IS not treasurer
of his lodge; that may be the explanation
Married people have to put up with a
GOOD deal from each other. An AtchlSon
Woman complains that her husband Snofes
but he comes back by saying that she
leaves her hair in the comb
We often think that in the ideal comrnu-
nitv there will be no regular day OF rest,
buf that people will work shorter hours
and work every day The Sunday rest al
vTavs' knocks us out. And we have noticed
that it knocks out most people.
THE coming manager of railroads VIII
rerosnize the importance of getting people
home at the earliest moment. Ever noJlc9
now a team will travel when 1t IS headed
toward home? 1t IS the same Win peopise5
and it makes them angry to have a train
kin time
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23

Abner Gaines of the Arkansas railroad
commission was talking the other dav
ABOUT railroad travellers experiences.
II you do much railroadine" said
Mr.. Gaines, you happen On a God GOD
many interesting and curious things 7
happened on an interesting and curious
thing only last week
7 was sitting in certain train when
side me.
The conductor soon appeared for the
tickets, and the farmer showed his big
hands first into one pocket and then in
to another He got excited and red. His
CLONES became unused and tumbled.
By lingo, he said, L can't seem to
locate that ticket nowhere
Well said the conductor, in a good
natured way, I'll stop around again Ia
And he Went off with smile and a
nod.
I'm about 90 minutes he returned. The
farmer went through all his pockets
again, got red in the face again, muss-
ed and tumbled his clothes again, all to
no purpose.
Never mind now,' said the conduc-
tor. You've got that ticket, and you'll
find it yet. You're a little flustered.
That's what's the trouble. I'll come
back again after awhile
And at last. the conductor returned
for the third time. But he didn't allow
the old mans third rummage to go so
far. He gave a loud laugh. Why he
said. there's your ticket, there in your
mouth. You must have had it there all
. I guess I must said the farmer
sheepishly
and he took the ticket out of his
mouth, and the conductor punched it
and passed on, convulsed with laugh
ter.
'sThe farmer was a hard-headed,
solid-Iooking old fellow. After a while
1 turned to him and said:
IS Tn afraid you're losing your mem
Dry sir
'.He chucl1led and assumed a crafty
mo fear he said. No fear. That
ticket was a month old, and I was just
soaking the date off LOS Angeles
Times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
JAYHA WKER JOTS

lola is getting in early and avoid
ing the rush. It has already had a
Fourth of July accident.
According to the Lyons Republican,
James A. Benn, the city editor of the
Philadelphia North American, who
created a stir at the National Fdi-
torial association at Guthrie the other
day by his attack on the Quay machine
IN Pennsylvania, used to live down at
Sterling.
Here is another of those items with
which Bill White is narrowing the
nerves of large number of Emporia
people: After an oppressive silence
OF several months, Emporia has been
treated TO an item of sensational Cos
sip which is causing the women to
gather in groups and talk in an under
tone, While the men are forced to
promise never to mention it to any
one before they are told about it. You
can guess how terrible it is
Every few days the Emporia Ca
zette prints mystifying items like this:
There is a story of the doings at a
party last week that would tangle IN
the Associated Press If sent to it. AMI
would be worth a full page with illus
trations in the Police Gazette" In
most towns there would be demand
Tor the Gazette to speak out and tell
what 1t means, but in Emporia a lot
OF people, each of whom has A dir
ferent secret, go around and ask tIte
paper to please say nothing more
about it.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.

rFrom the Chicago News.J
Good resolutions are apt to run down at
A man may be as good as his word and
still be no good
Never judge a mans dishonesty by his
fT Nobody gets mad these days if people
forget to shut the door
He who laughs last may laugh best, bu1
he who eats first eats best
Love is an excellent diet for young men
who have too much avorduDOis.
He who has hopes for tomorrow seldom
worries about the failures of yesterday.
A genius is usually eccentric, but an &c
If YOU are convinced that the world IS
growing worse every day, take something
for your liver.
A woman seldom talks to herself, but she
more than makes up for it when she has
q one-man audience
AS all girls expect to marry naillionairess,
learn the art of cooking.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23

H E. Buermeyer, the president of the
National Amateur Skating association,
was describing a. banquet that he had
once attended in New York.
Il found this banquet interesting" he
said, land 1 was one of the last to
leave. In the cloakroom, as was put
ting on my hat and coat, I couldn't help
noticing the woebegone look on the at
tendant's face. The poor fellow appear
ed worried and sad. and every little
while he sighed and muttered to him
self
You seem disconsolate, friend 1
said.
I am disconsolate, sir said the at
What is the trouble?' said L
Haven't the guests tipped you well to-
night?'
'The attendant answered in an excit-
It's not only, sir. that they haven't
tipped me, but they've taken the quar-
ter that I put in the tray for decoy.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
JOURNAL ENTRIES

OF course he is now DR.. Roosevelt. but
just the same he had better not fire Dr.
Rixey as his family physician just at
present.
How Noble Prentis must laugh if he
can look down from the spirit world
and see George r. Peck travelling
around with valley"
You will notice that undertakers and
doctors hold their conventions at the
same time. The latter are indispensa-
bic to the undertakes.
Three book agents invaded the State
Journal Office today-and the Journal
force doesn't seem so easy either
Don't venture into the wheat country
just now. If you do the farmers will
surely put you to work in the harvest
fields.
There was a great curiosity on the
street Of Chicago Thursday. It was an
express wagon that was not guarded by
a policeman. Its owner now receives a
large salary for exhibiting it in a
museum.
T. B. GerOw estimates that the Kan
sas wheat crop this year will be S.
100000 bushels He basis his guess on
the number of harvest hands the wheat
belt is yelling for. It doesn't cost any
thing to guess.
The Kansas City murderess makes
the sixth woman now under sentence of
death for numbering their husband
Still the men allow themselves to be
caught by Cupid just as though there
were no danger.
The story about a lot of harvest
hands having captured a freight train
going into the wheat belt having been
told, that other old-timer about the
farmers of Rush county stopping the
trains and pulling people off to make
them help save the wheat is also due.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
Poor

Between Henry Arthur Jones. the
playwright, and Beerbohm Tree. the &C
tor, a controversy has of late been go
ing on. Mr. Jones, in this controversy,
praises modern plays and sneers lit
tie at modern actors, and Mr. Tree
praises modern actors and sneers 1T
tie at modern plays.
Gently a dinner where Mr.. Jones told a
story about Mr.. Tree.
mr.. Tree. said the playwright, met
a friend of his one afternoon on he
ssThe two stood and conversed a lit
tie while and then Mr. Tree said;
Have you been down to see the ace
.. no: too poor said the other.
Too DOOR Mr.. Tree exclaimed;
why. you spend enough on wine ana
e's aBIIt the other, nettled, interrupted.
81 don't mean I'm too poor. mean
you're too poor ne said.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
REFLECTIONS OF a BACHELOR
TFrom the New York Press.l

From Inc New IUIA 14Ess'l
Politics is making others believe what
YOU don't believe yourself
There is no use getting mad Just pc
cause a girl thinks too much of your hap
piness to marry you
The way to make a woman think you
wears because she thinks other men Will
admire it.
A girl is awful smart when she goes to
church to be able all at the same Illne 20
make her mother believe she Is readlng the
service and some man that she is looking
at him.
When a man telephones his wife ne has
~ sfsv downtown late with the president
~ bis company, it is sign she knows he
is Going to lose a lot of money with mis-
friends at poker.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
SAFE AND SANE.

Every American feels an added de-
gree of pride in the fact that President
Roosevelt has played such an import
ant part in the peace negotiations now
progressing between Japan and Russia.
And. by the way, this action of the
president is a very gross reflection upon
the judgment of some people who fear
ed the safety and Sanity of the
president in any questions pertaining
to War.-Lyons Republican.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23

Doubtless bring to light the truth as to
what officials are responsible for the
rebates. That would establish positive
" Mr.. Morton's responsibility, or. ms
freedom from it. It is undoubtedly true
that politics has cut considerable hgure
in the accusations against the retiring
secretary of the navy.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
CIRCULATION OF THE BIBLE.

In spite of the general lament that
as in former times, the British and
Foreign Bible society reports in May
that 100000 copies of the Bible have
been issued in 1906. showing an in
crease of. 1000 ever the previous
year. The complete Bible is now
published in 100 languages, the New
Testament in ninetv-foul and one book
OF scripture in 1876 more. Some $780,
600 copies of the Russian. and Japa-
nese scriptures have been distributed
among the belligerents in the far east.
New York sun.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23

II IS said that Senator Foraker and
Secretary Taft have a perfect under
standing as to who shall be the Ohio
presidential candidate in 1908. The truth
of this assertion was difficult to believe
until It became rumored that Chief
Justice Fuller viii probably retire short
Is from the United States supreme
bench. in which event Secretary Taft
viii succeed him. This arrangement
would be eminently satisfactory to Sen
ltor Foraker.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
WHAT Pill IS DOING.

Congressman Campbell is in Washing
ton, and if he finds the Standard Oil
inquiry has been stuffed into a dusty
pigeon hole somewhere, he will pull it
out, blow the dust off of it,, and stay
in Washington long enough to see that
it isn't pitched into the scrap heap
again. even if it takes all summer
lola Register.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
WHAT IT SOUNDS IKE.

Grand Duke Alexis who was forced to
retire as head of the Russian navy IN
der charges of plundering the naval
funds is described as an urbane, be-
nevolent, kindly old gentleman. This
sounds a good deal like the defense Of
an American lti-millionaire robber
by an American Observation-Disclosures
son News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23

Governor Folk is different" The
Chicago News describes how as follows:
zone thing about Governor Folk that
some people do not like is the way he
has Of discovering that a law is being
violated when everybody else knows it,
even though his official attention is not
called to the violation"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23

The generals who do their fighting by
long distance from st. Petersburg. who
are opposing the peace proposition. are
ever so much more in favor of fighting
than are the soldiers who are facing
the Japs in Manchuria. Sometimes 10
cation has a great deal to do with ones
'opinion.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
HOW no DO -

To the skeptical who think that
man cannot legitimately earn a million
dollars in a lifetime, the Phillipsburg
Dispatch knocks that theory into
cooked hat. The Dispatch says all you
need to do is to save a thousand dollars
a year for a thousand years and you
have it-Belleville Telescope.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
KANSAS C0MAENT
HIS PREPARAr1oN.

Frank Hoffman, the man who muir
dered Myers in Kansas city, went to
the house to do the bloody. deed armed
with the butt Of a billiard cue and a
bottle of whisky. on entering the house
he stopped in the kitchen and took a
drink of whisky, then he was ready for
his work. What kind of a. devil is it
that lives in a whisky bottle Jewell
T2n0f5bIfp9p
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
A POOR POLICY.

1t is getting to be an old story. Seven
professors will leave the University of
Kansas this year because they can make
more money elsewhere. It is taking up
good while. and costing US a great
deal, to learn that we are underpaying
our educators and that some of them,
at least, will not stand for it.-Iola Reg
lister.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS
HOME NEWS WHILE AWAY.

Subscribers Of the state Journal
away during the summer may have
che paper mailed regularly each day
60 any address at the rate OF thirty
cents q month. Address changed as
often as desired. While out OF town
che State Journal will be % you ike
Q daily letter from home.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
A HARD PROPOSITION.

Colonel Bryan is gradually coming
around to a good many of President
Roosevelt's views. He will probably
never be able to see, however, why any
man should ever refuse a. presidential
omination.-Eureka Herald.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23

California is looking forward to a
great influx of Japanese soldiers to that
state as soon as the war is over. Cali
fornia hotels will probably hereafter
advertise that their chambermaids and
cooks are taken from the ranks of the
veterans who stormed Port Arthur, or
who routed the Russians at Lao Young,
'er who sent Rojestvensky's feet to the
bottom Of the sea.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
Arain the Nfofher-in-IIaw.

Henry Clews, the banker, talked at a
banquet about the daughter of deceit.
"a New York woman" he said.
saw in a shop window on Firth ave
nue. a collar of pearls that she liked
She stopped her carriage, ana sought
out the shOpkeeper.
/" What is the price she said, of
that pearl collar in your window?
" Six thousand dollars, ma, am.
said the shopkeeper, and he drew
forth the collar. and displayed its
beauties to the dazzled woman.
''She took out her check book.
q" TN tell you what I'll do she said.
I'll give you my check for three thou
sand dollars, and I'll send my husband
here to see the collar this afternoon.
Don't tell him it is six thousand; tell
him it is three thousand. Them may
be. he will buy it for me-
1.-THE jeweler bowed and smiled. He
had seen this sort of game played
many a time before.
g I wish you luck, madam, he said,
and the lady departed.
Her husband she found in his Office
in a mood unusually tractable. He
had sold certain stocks at a grand
profit that morning. He consented
readily, therefore, to go and look at
soThat evening his wife dressed for
dinner with unusual care. She wore
her most beautiful gown. She
dreamed, as she dressed, of an aftec-
tionate husband clasping about her
white throat a collar of pearls.
"And-1 bought that pearl collar
were the mans first words when he
" You dear!' she exclaimed. Let me
see it
my mothers. You know it is her
birthday tomorrow. Los Angeles
Times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
"A JOLLY" FOR sTUBBS.

be secretary of the interior. 1t is prob
ably just gossip but it is of the right
sort They need a man like Stubs to
take some of the work off of Roosevelt.
Lawrence World.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23

Perhaps Governor Hoch backed out of
going to the Stahl picinc with Rev.
Charles NJ. Sheldon because he did not
wish to give Mr.. Sheldon such spien-
did opportunity to load him up with ad-
vice concerning the enforcement of pro-
hibition. Governor Hoch has been Civ
lng that kind of advice for the last 20
years-but taking it is another matter.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
STRANGER

The Marquette Tribune notes that
no contribution for the relief of the
tornado sufferers there has been re-
ceived from the Chicago mail order
houses, although those concerns have
enjoyed a good deal of business from
that community. Strange, isn't it,
Hutchinson Bee.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23

No sooner had the presidents cores
.pondence in the Morton case been made
public than Williams college made him
h doctor of letters. He does write
FIRST rate letter, that's a fact. If you
don't believe it, ask Paul Morton.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23

You used to hear Democrats com
plain a great deal about politics in the
pulpit because Republican preachers
sometimes publicly approved Republi-
can officials. The Democrats cannot
make that complaint any more. Not
an official in the country gets more
praise from Republican ministers than
Joseph w. Folk. the Democratic gov
arnor Of Missouri.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23

A great deal is said about the st.
Louis brewers not favoring Governor
Folk for president. However, it is not
Improbable that the brewers would
rather have Mr.. Folk for president than
Ito have him continue as governor of
Missouri.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
THEIR FIRST THOUGHT.

The close of the fiscal year, it now
appears, will record a deficit of not
less than S3O,O0O,00O. Tell congress
that it must now either cut down ex-
penses or increase the revenues. and
congress will reply: ''Wen, how shall
we increase the revenues Sioux
City Journal.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
IN AUTOS.

In Kansas wages have grown faster
than the retail price of food. Wages
must have been bounding along in that
state without regard for the speed
ordinances.-W Washington Post.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23

One pleasant thing about being a
vice president is that he doesn't need
to go home when congress isn't in ses-
sion and try to explain things to his
Chicago Record-Herald.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-06-23
What Is Needed.

If Botanist Burbank wishes to con-
fer real boon on humanity he sho11If1
set TO work to improve the strawberry
News