The weekly true Democrat. (Tallahassee, Fla.) 1905-1912, 1905-06-02

feminine. Bella-How mean Of him to
refer to your age-Brooklyn Life
She-I'm thinking Of changing my
name. What would you suggest? He
Mine She-All right.-Cleveland
Plain-Dealer.
Gracye-Maude asked George to kiss
her. Gladys-Well, l like her cheek!
Gracye-So did George.-LouisvNle
Courier-Journal.
He-Why have you nicknamed your
dog Circumstances" She-Because
l have absolutely no control over him.
Detroit Free Press.
Miss Pert-Which half is It that
doesn't know how the other half lives?
Miss Caustique-The better half
Philadelphia Record.
Brother-You can't think how nerv-
GUS | was when / proposed. Sister
You can't think how nervous she was.
until you did.-Town and Country.
Jack-Why do you girls spend so
much time and money on dress? Nell
(candidly)-To interest the men and
worry other girls.-Philadelphia Press.
lip-What was the greatest luck
you ever had hunting? Tuck--Once
when a fellow shot at me In mistake
for a deer and missed me.-Philadel-
phia Record.
We'll, this is a put-up Job, all
right" said the man, as no struggled
under his wife's direction, to hang the
pictures on the parlor Whatsoever
vile Journal.
Dashaway-I'm afraid I'll never get
my ring back from that Piper girl.
Cleverton-Why, l thought she was a
peach. Dashaway-She is-clingstone
variety.-Judge.
THAT Mrs. Giltedge is awfully
proud" How so?" why, her father
tried to advise her and she wouldn't
have IL because advice Is cheap"
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
"Why does that Congressman say so
many more clever things than the rest
of u.s." He is shrewd enough to pick
out the brightest reporters to interview
him. "-Washingto Star.
Victim--Help! Police! am being
robbed and murdered! Policeman
All right; I'll be there as soon as l
have helped this pretty young lady
across the street.--New Yorker.
81 had to laugh the other day
"You don't mean you we're absolutely
compelled to, hope?" That's just
what mean. This was my employers
joke. New Orleans Times-Democrat.
He-Miss Sears tells me she has
made up her mind never to marry.
She-Oh, that's an old trick Of hers.
She wants people to think she's still
a giddy young thing.-Chicago News.
Blobbs-Education is often a waste
OF time and energy. Slobbs-Thats
right ] once knew a fellow who spent
Ave years teaching his parrot to swear
and then went and got religion.-Phii'
adelphia Record. $50
Mrs. Peck ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS:
are you, anyhow, a man or a mouse!
Henry Peck (bitterly)-A man, my
dear. II were a mouse I'd have you
up on that table yelling for help right
now!-Cleveland leader.
Yes" said the man who poses a.
a connoisseur, Il am fond OF music, al
though don't know how to play"
That" replied young, Mrs. Torkins, as
Just the way CHARLEY is with the
races. Star.
Have you a good cook?" asked Mrs.
Bond Hill. yes. she's good enough"
replied Mrs. Chester Park. She at
tends church three times a week and
all that, but her cooking is something
fierce, "-Philadelphia Inquirer
Just from ireland, are your" asked
Mira. Hiram Omen OF the applicant, and
wero YOU trained across the water?"
"Shure, ye must know betther nor
thcs, ma'am," replied the girl. Il was
shipped across Press.
Mrs. Younglove-Be sure not to pass
that cake on the sideboard 20 the
guests this evening. won't you, dear3
Mr.. Younglove-Why notI Mrs.
Younglove-Becsuse made q mistake
aud put In bluing instead Of vanilla.
II Raatea oueer. hat iap't IL q beautIfuf