davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

A business-like widow in London,
the day after her bereavement sent
the following note to the insurance
company which had issued a policy
on her husbands life: 81 take pleas
ure in informing you of the death of
my husband, who was insured in your
company. Please send me papers
quick, so | can prove he is dead"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20
Thief CAUGHT at jefferson,

Jefferson, July 11.-An unknown
nan was captured at the Open
heimer home at $3.50 o'clock yester
day morning just after he had forced
entrance and was endeavoring to ran
sack the house. He attempted to run
after being discovered, but was un
successful. 1t is thought that he is
a tramp.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

The New Jersey minister who com.
plains that in a Newark church re.
Gently when the sermon was being
preached the choir were reading a five
cent magazine, adds that it is not an
uncommon thing for a church organist
so go out during the sermon to get a
drink Of whisky. Why not send some
missionaries over to New Jersey?
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

A speedy way of lacing and unlac-
ing shoes has been invented 10y Miss
Elizabeth Falconer, of Louisville, Ky.
BY her device one lacing string is
permanent in it's position, and pull
ing the top of it laces the shoe. Pull
ing the bottom string ~unlaces it.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

The $500 English immigrants who
entered the port of Boston last year
would have made a very notable addi-
ton to the colony of Massachusetts
ago.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

Interesting indeed is the project of
the company that is planning to spend
$4,000 900 in dredging the Tiber, to
make it navigable as far as Rome.
There's 10 knowing what the dredg-
ers may dig up.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

1t is not true, as scoffers say, that
the only difference between winter
and summer in New England is that
we spend our summers fishing and
shoveling snow, and that in winter
there's no ishing.-BOston Globe.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

Mr.. Peary will take with him on his
polar expedition some very delicate in
struments, which will let him know
whether he has discovered the exact
spot or no. This is a necessary pre-.
caution.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

1t is said there is a singular lack
of enthusiasm on the part of the
guests at William Waldorf Astor's
house parties. There may be a lack
of enthusiasm, but there is nothing
singular about it.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20
Woman is Burned to Death.

Muscatine, July 16.-Mrs. Richard
Wiltsey, wife of a merchant at Ro-
chester, Iowa, was burned to death.
She lighted a fire with kerosene. Her
neighbors rushed in in time to find
the body burned to a crisp. The hus.
band and two children survive.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

Kang Yu Wei, head of the Chinese
Reform Association, is in New York.
This sounds even more serious tnan
the boycott.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

The man who bought a $4,000 auto
mobile in New York with a bad check
deserved to have it break down with
him before he turned the corner of
the street.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

When it comes to picturesque styles
in revolution the South American re.
publics are reluctantly compelled to
admit that Russia has them all out
claSSed.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

A New York society woman has
started a model dairy in order to rro-
vide pure milk for babies. That's en-
ather ahti-race suicide proposition
which may we'll be encouraged.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

A European scientist has discovered
that fear is caused by a germ which
may be killed by incubation. He will
probably find that his theory is wrong
when he ~inoculates a woman and
then turns a mouse loose in the room
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

Three hundred thousand people Wis
tied COney Island last Sunday. The
devil continues to regard vacations as
unnecessary.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20
Faults in yourself can only be hid.

| rdulIS III yOuTSSll Cdu Ouly US ulu'
len by a mask.
One day as a train from the East
pulled up at the dinky little station of
a most depressing town in the fever
analogue district of Arkansas, a pass
enger, thrusting his head out of a car
| window, demanded in bitter tones of a
detected looking citizen who was lean
ing against the station door: "Tell
me, what do you call this dried up,
dreary, God-forsaken placer" That's
near enough, stranger" replied the
native in a melancholy voice, "let it
go at that"
A fortune is the ability to revel in
your own contentment.
P~errysburg, Ohio. is to have a vast
seedless-apple nursery. The Spencer
Seedless Apple Company has purchas-
ed a tract of land there, which will be
planted with 125 900 seedlings.
A close and careful examination of
the last report or the postmaster of
Chanute, Kan, by an auditor at Wash
ington, showed that the postmaster
was one cen "long." He received q
twelve page statement showing how
the error had been made, and with the
statement a check from Uncle Sam for
n cent.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

An eastern man has succeeded in
breeding a scentless variety of skunks.
Let him now try his hand at deodor-
lZing the autos.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

A Chicago man advertises for "a
lady stenographer," requesting that
she state her age" He must think
there are ladies in that town who are
very much in need of jobs.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

King Edward has had another birth
day without doing anything for Will
liam Waldorf Astor. Yet they say
Edward is a kind-hearted king.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

We do not know certainly, but we
suspect that the Baltimore man who
said in his will: The world has not
loved me-" neVe really loved the
world.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

We wonder if the people up on Mars
had as much trouble digging their
canals.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

The price of chloroform has been
reduced 40 per cent. 1t is evident
that DR.. Osler has not succeeded in
causing the demand to exceed the sup
ply.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

In the baseball league standing at
the end Of the season, as in the apple
barrel, the best and the ripest fruit is
conspicuous at the top.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

Japan is going to borrow $3.50, 0O0,,
600. Evidently the Japs don't expect
Russia to be able to pay the indem,
nifty right away.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

Edison says radium will be as cheap
as coal some day. Yet this may only
mean that coal will be as expensive
as radium some day.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20
Thirteen Horses cremsted.

Fort Dodge, July 13.-Thirteen
horses were cremated in a fire which
destroyed the city livery barn yes
terday. Loss $1,000.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

Should a woman wear a hat for
two ~seasons?" asks a contemporary.
She should, but she won't.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

It's odd, but quite true, that a ham.
mock is far more comfortable with
two persons in it than with one.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

John Jacob Astor says the automo-
bile will be succeeded by the air ship.
And still the horse has not gone.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

Newport now has two babies each
worth in its own name 100000 00-or
less than. you would take for yours.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

IL understand Colonel Jones is a
atalist." You're right thar, stran-
Ter! He never fails to git his mani"
New Orleans Times-D Democrat.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

There is no such word as graft in
the Japanese language. They just use
the word theft.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1905-07-20

A tempest in a teapot is a small af-
fair when compared with a revolution
in a bowl of soup.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-09-30
n7Innnnnnf
JEFFRlES COULD HAVE BEATEN JOHN |.


MY honest opinion IL, and I have
seen both men fight IN their prime, that
Jim Jefiries now could whip John l..
Sullivan when he was at the zenith OF
his ability in five rounds, with but Mt
tie trouble" This from "Parson" Da-
yies, who has handled rs many prize
fighters as any other man in the coun-
try; % man who knows the game from
fortunes OF the greatest negro fighter
the world has ever seen, should carry
conviction.
IL think that Jim would have whipped
John within five rounds and never turn
a hair, As matter Of fact. Bob Fit2-
simmons would have an easy time in
whipping John l., The latter had no
SKIN, he could not hit as hard as JEFF
fries, he would have been entirely out
classed against Fitzsimmons. He neve"
trained and he had favorte way Of
taking aim with his right and then
sending it out, II the man was there
when II landed, he was knocked out,
but in this later day Of skill, the man
would not be there,
Notwithstanding the claim made by
Sullivan that he would not fight a ne
gro, St is true that In Boston he Was
stripped for a fight with George Cod
frey, when the police broke into the
room and stopped the mill It Is also
true, aud there Is a telegram now in
existence to prove It. that he did sign
for a fight with Peter Jackson IN San
Francisco.
After the fight had been made up
for purse OF 100000, n walter IN the
club In which the fight was 20 have
been was killed, and the authorities
stepped in and prevented the Jackson
Sullivan fight. Had It taken place a
negro would have been champion
heavyweight Of this country, for Sulli-
van would have had no chance against
Jackson. This negro was the cleverGst
heavyweight / ever saw, but whisky
killed him. He would never leave his
man, and he was the fastest QUICKER
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-09-30
News s Sportine! World at Home and Abroad

ties Several OF them have suffered ar-
rest for trespassiug upon the sacred
premises Of the Utah state Gun club.
These now have a club of their own
which they are preparing to land ON the
necks of their oppressors. a number
of salt Lake sportsmen OF the rich yn-
riety who monopollao all Of eHrths good
things they can lay hands on. many of
them members OF the clubs which have
sequestrated fayorlte hunting grounds,
proposed 90 invade Davis county m
automobiles ana slaughter the quail thA
people of that locality have been pro-
tecting during the 10 days open season
for quail They have another guess
coming however, unless they travel
with flying machines NJ evcry foot ot
the hunting ground is privately owned
and the invaders will DO arrested for
treepass II they vcutur, uron IT, II
seems to be an idiosyncr2cy OF wealthy
sportsmen everywhere To wish TO corner
all the good hunting and fishing. de-
barring those who really need them
from the bountles OF nature. \ dose
Of their own medicine should have a
good tonic effect.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-09-30

against them and to suggest measures
OF drastic character. That ia what
automobiles must expect unless they
take matters In hand and provide rem
edieg that are reasonable and at the
same time effective.
There arc two points that have oc-
CURED TO me IN the framing OF a law
First only licensed persons should be
allowed to run automobiles They
should be required 10 pass an eXamina-
ton by experts and Co secure license
under state authority. This seems 10
me would IN many states strike at the
root Of existing evils
"ln the second place | think that the
Automobiles should be required to pay
u moderate yearly license fee The
amount of this fee should be graded
according TO the size OF the machine,
A 6O-horsepower machine should pay
six times as much as a l0-horsepower
machine. The revenue desired from
this license should be made special
fund for the repair OF public roads"
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-09-30

ever saw, The blows aimed at him sell
dom landed for he was not only shlfty
on his feet, but his head and body were
constantly on the move and Just out of
the way of the strength OF the blows
aimed at him. His idea was What's
the use' You have got TO come back.
You can't whip a man by acting on the
defensive an the time
II think Tommy Ryan one of the best
ring generals l ever saw, and Jem Mace
the best fist fighter The latter was ps
clever as any Of the comers-on of the
present and would have made people
like Hart and Rubin and Sharkcy look
Ike lolypop In box OF Huyler's
Tommy Ryan had a punch with either
hand, and he would stick as close TO
his man as he could. He was much
lighter than Jack OBrien, hut while the
latter IS much nashier with his mitts
and with his feet yet there is no doubt
I'm my mind that Ryan could have
whipped him
"As FAR as Jeifries Is concerned there
IS no man I'm the country today who
has a chance with him However. ho
win get back in the ring some of these
days and he too fat, for he can't train.
Then somebody about whom we row
know nothing win step in and do like
Corbctt did TO sullivan
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-09-30
WHAT YOST is DOING.
Noted Football Coach II Getting His
Eleven In shape,

Salt Lakers who take delight in
watching the great amateur game ot
football are Interested in whatever
Coach Yost of the famous Michigan
team, does, because Of Maddox. Yost
is working hard at present to get the
team IN shape. or rather definitely or
gaui2e the same.
4 roster OF the husllles now out for
positions on the team follows.
Vcteraus--Adolph Schultz J, G. Cur
tia, Denny Clark Tom Hammond, Har-
ny Hammond, II. NJ. Stuart, Walter
Graham, Frank Longman, H. j. Weeks
and Capt NOrcrosS
1904 reserves. G. Garrels (end), II.
r.. Patrick (halO, J. Mack Love
CackleD, Duncan Pierce Cfull baclJ, A.
r.. Chandler tfull back, W. j. Miller
tcenof and guard, NJ. p. Rmnney (end
and halo H. \, Workman fhalO and
Walter W. Rheipschild Gun back.
1904 l-freshmen--Car6y CENTER,
h. h. Newton OaCkle), c. H. Clement
(guarO aud w. j. Embs (guard).
Others-A X. Barlow the quarter
back Of the Junior Law championship
team, r. w. Wetmore an eX-half back
on Knox College and T.. D. Kanaja, the
bottom man Of tho Michigan gym team.
The punting OF SWeeley has been
missed ever since that great kicker left
college, and Yost has had the wanted"
sign out for a long time His instruc-
tions Cor the men 10 kick football all
summer have borne results. Big cur
It's Johnny Garrels, Rumney and stu.
art are All booung the leather in good
shape stuart, especially, eXcels IA he
Is getting punts away In good shape
for 65 and 70 yards At this early date
Il looks as II he viii DO tho kicking
Denny Clark and Kanaja are both
suffering from strained ankles, re-
ceived I'm running on the rough field at
Whitmore Lake. The men rs q general
rule are looking good ana strong and
are feeling fine
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-09-30
A Good Ball Player.

At a recent prayer meeting I'm New
York Dave l'ult2, center fielder OF the
New York Hlghlanders, led the meeting.
He made a speech which contained
many good cpigrams Among other
things, Fultz also said
1.-THE ball player who achieves victory
by unfairuess never gains anything,
"Ill-gotten gains have no sweetness.
IN the game of baseball a man learns
we'll the lessons Of everyday life,
Every man should be generous.
Baseball teaches generosity.
Many men are religious when II is
no detriment To their business,
MANY men throw Off Christianity as
We do our night robes upon arising
Religion is an aid to good ban p'ay-
ing and good ball playing helps tcIi-
CiOu.
THE majority OF those who play ball
are good men and gentlemen
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-09-30
School for Chnnnsnrs.

New York ls TO have an automobile
s,hou ior on1uIeurs that Is expected 10
turn out expert drivers for motor cars.
u viii be known as the New York
school OF Automobile Engineers, ana
Prof Charles r.. Lucke, Ms, Pho. or
Columbia university, win be director Of
instruction.
There win Dee % simple but thorough
course and II, -. Craftsman. one Of the
managers soys mat no man win be Civ
en- q certificate OF graduation until he "a
competent 10 handle any make OF auto
mobile, not only 200 the road but also an
the shop.
II would Do pretty good thing "
such 20 school were established On salt
Lake.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-09-30
DUCK HUNTING TOMORROW.
Vail season Opens and Much Trouble
Ahead for the Blrds

The fan season FOR duck shooting
opens tomorrow and for month the
festive bird had better ny high, Thous-
ands Of crack shots CD are already out
armed with shotguns and pounds OF
ammunition. The slaughter will be
great Perhaps other than ducks wilt
be hit tomorrow. Boys with 90. caliber
rifles vii have TO be watched pretty
carefully or there viii be work for the
physicians whe nthe mighty hunters re-
turn,
At tho various haunts ducks are re-
ported as being plentiful Practically
an the ponds aud sloughs are controlled
by organized clubs and the man who
does not belong to one Of them is UNI
fortunate indeed
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-09-30
STATE FAIR MEET,
some Good Events In Horse Racing Limo
~ Promised.

The weeks horse race meet az the
Agricultural Park track during the
state fair promises to be the very best
ever The program for each day has
already been published In these coll
umns. That the meet will be success
ful there ~ no reason to doubt as the
sport Is I'm competent hands and ~
great deal OF hard work has been done
TO make the racing the best we have
had here for q long time The purses
offered are liberal and It may be de-
pended upon that all the fastest animals
I'm the State Of Utah will be entered,
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-09-30
Neglected Colds.

Every part Of the mucous membrane.
the nose throat, ears, head and lungs,
oto,, are subjected to disease ana blight
from neglected colds Billiards. H0re-
hound Syrup "a q pleasant and effective
remedy 2jc. zoe $10l. " Akendrick,
Valley Mills Texas writes. 81 have used
Ballards Horehotmd Syrup Tor Cdughs
and throat troubles; H. u q pleasant ard
most effective remedy" Sold by q. G. ~
J. DRUG Dept b
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-09-30
DRIVERS TO BLAME.
col. kuser Declares Mo florists Are Who'll
~ Responsible for Trouble,

COL A. II. Kuser Of Bernardville. y,
j.. an enthusiastic automobillst who
owns three machines, seems 20 think
that the motorists themselves, through
their reckless driving are largely re-
sponsible for the feeling Of hostility to-
wards them. He says,
II greatly lament the evil repute into
which automobiliug has fallen. | ride
from 90 20 100 miles every day, ana am
familiar with the evils os well os the
pleasures Of the exercise. The numer>
Gus horrible accidents that have lately
occurred IN different parts OF the coun-
try the frequent killing OF animals IN
the roads and highways, the dardeYl
speed that some reckless drivers OF the
machines seem TO Story I'm driving has
all tended TO embitter the public mind
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-09-30
PORTLAND
FAIR RATES,

win only be IN effect q few days long
or, September S0th is the last date for
tickets direct, and September eth, 2sth
and 29th, for tickets via Los Angeles or
San FranclBco See agents or other Or
egon Short Line advertisement ir this
issue for further particulars,
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-09-30
RIGHT BACK AT THEM.
Davis County Farmers Take Measures
Against salt Lake Hunters,

This from the Logan Journal:
The purchasing Of lands and estab-
fishing OF duck reserves by wealthy
sportsmen Of Salt Lake has affected
the citizens Of Davis county who like a
duck themselves occasionally, as It has
those Of Brigham City and other locall-
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-09-30
The Chase Photo Studio
Has moved 20 22 Mala'

mrhat Good Cosl," 5000 ibs IN L'
' BANDEnGGE
lsi Molshn S'n'
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-09-30
FEW AGGIEs OUT.

The prospect for a serious contest IN
Utah is not encouraging az this time.
Reports from the Agricultural college
indicate that few men are trying for
the team, and that of the old team,
hardly a player Is back on the Held
Coach Campbell IL conceded to have
very difficult task before him In making
creditable showing. Jamison Is the
best player from the old team who IL
out. He Ia described as bigger and
stronger than last year, and prom
Using to play a good game, F'rew, the
Splinter Is out for work, and is looked
upon to nh the quarterback position.
INTERCLAsS FOOTBALL.
The second series Of interclass foot
ball games win begin az the University
oct. 10, and continue until a champion
team has been picked The series last
year was popular, and brought out a
good line Of talent, the victory finally
resting on the sophomore class, an the
only distinction the class achieved dur
ing the year.
The rules for the games provide that
no man who Is on the Varsity squad
and eating at the training table at the
time Of the games, or who won Var
sity L last year shall be eligible to
play.
The victors OF last year have but
little chance this year as they have
lost their hes. men. Herbst having gone
TO the training table and Moore to
coaching the second team, The seniors
have Craudall, Billings and Latimer as
q nucleus for a new team The so
phomores have an excellent opportunity
with practically the same team which
lined up last year. Among its mem
bership Will be Clayton, Wolf, $. Ben
Mon, Cannon. Knaughton, and Hig-
gins The freshmen are a promising
lot, though recent recruits, IL Hennes-
sey does not make the Varsity he VIII
be available. while Lisle Smith, Ashby
and Earl Bennlon are scheduled for
places The series would be interesting
and ought TO develop much new materi-
al for the squad,
\ feature Of the work this week was
the installation Of the tackling dunn
/ my, which went into use Thursday eve
| ming,
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-09-30
rHrY KIrKED ~ RAII.

The bail was Kicked ahead
straight la the direction of the other
yoal, followed by o. rush hut as % kind
pr COMPENSATION those were the days
when the expert drbblers had their iu-
nings, II was wonderful to watch the
manner I'm which some players would
dribble a ball through host OF uppo.
neuts and end by scoring "a goal But
In the eighties new phenomenon
hrose. The Lancashire club had price
vailed on the football association TO
tanction professionalism, and one Of
he first TO the field the world famous
"Rreston North End. succeeded Iu
getting together. mostly from scotland
bns OF the cleverqst combinations Of