New-York tribune., 1905-11-13
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

The European resident OF a government station
in Java Is important person. held In great honor
by the natives. story is told OF one resident who
was thrown of his dogcart while descending
a Hiu He had barely recovered from the stun
ming fall when he caught sight of his secretary.
who had been following in his own carriage, COM
ing bounding down the steep road like a big india
rubber ball, rolling and over in the dust.
.HelIo Have you been upset, too?' asked the
resident NO resident sputtered the fat little
secretary, scrambing to his feet again. but
thought If the resident leaps. leap. too
HELP WANTED.
Twas in a kitchen. cluttered up
win ang fonng on pot UeW snd in pam am apron blue
sad faced editor man.
His hands ere soapy his shoes splashed.
And S0apy ahd hd g5 Ss was ssto1 hs guv
In a minor mnirnus key:
.Oh am cook and second girl,
And parlor maid, and upstairs jade,
And a that comes to sweep
Newark News.
In connection with the anniversary of the birth
Of Sir Moses Monteaore THE Jewish World" tells
soroe anecdotes of the famous philanthropist Sir
Moses Montefore was once described by a comic pa
ner as a bon mot. They will soon be calling me a
len CJew) d'esprit,' was his comment In 1S23 poor
lew living in the City Of London was convicted
of highway robbery and condemned to be hanged
Mr. NIontehore, he then. convinced of the
mans innocence exerted himself obtain a re-
preve and called upon Justice OF the peace
whose sentiments toward the Jews were not OF the
most favorable kind. 'Ah.' observed the ]. P, In
answer to Mr. Montehore's efforts. you Jews al
wavs hang together; and so you ought Sir. re-
torted the phianthropist, fear the wish in your
case is father to the thought
Within His Rights.-''That's the sort OF fellow
Grabbed is" the caller was saying 7 don't be-
eve there's stingier man an In the & world ih. NV
father-n-law. He's the
.'see here" broke in Mrs. Nassst. you're forever
faying: y6s:t msan ssand things itE about your
o,vtbiSe ny about yours have II" retorted Nagget-
(Philadelphia Press
A schoolnaster at Gournoceral. France was ais-
missed by the Mayor. He barrfcadeo hinseii IN MS
school SO as not to be expelled pending an appeai
to the prefect Of the department The town .hen
,v,tn.ssed the extraordinary sight OF the cihiofen
standing in tho street outside and being taught
through the window by the schoolmasAr Hhs
teacher tr.urnphed for tho Mayor finally Yielded
A PIGsKIN CAMEO.
Upon the turf in iendish gles'
They gouge and, not infre0usntiy'
An eye out a nose on
And as they scramble. .eo9t 7, f,.rsS or sdud
Embroidered and bespattered.
We from their rough -and-tumble whiA
While one another gortn8.
More scored against than scoring-tfucX-
President Loubet his visit TO Spain niaos
nrasents to an almost Oriental extent Not
nan,ber of the Spanish royal family. from tho
ouesn Mother the youngest infant In arms
ana not a person OF any standing NJ court Na~
..,a, There was costly present for
the municipality of Madrid This last and thss
60 the Queen Mother were superb For her
siastv the President brought table service OF
.n. choicest Sevres including forty-eight figures
..n,,,p the different dances This service
...,n,a. one which Adorns the table OF the Elysee
on rare state occasions Of the first rnnsntuds The
r,f 10 the municipality Is colossal sevres vase OF
ner,ect workmanship 1t stands nfty-ei&ht incnes
high and is ornamentsd at the sides win nis"S
effective bronze work
DO you think that tho gAno OF FOOTBALL requires
sc!enee?' -n..s~,,, 80. ....ur.
r1oal lscaeuca."-CWaShlngton StASs