The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-02
THE EVENING STORY
A Modern Dnel.

A Modern Duel.
Surgeon Schiller and Lieutenant
Wright were rivals for the hand of the
eolonel's daughter Schuier was a
close student of the germ theory and
in high favor with the colonel. As to
the daughter, she preferred the fight
ing arm of the service, though she
really liked Schiller. This irritated
Wright. who called Schiller a germ
graduating soldier. Schiller retorted
that he could kill more men with
with ammunition One reply led to
another till the doctor referred to Off
GERS of the line as unscientific butch
ers, whereupon Wright declared that
withdrew and sent Schiller chal-
lenge. Since the challenger would be
on duty as officer of the guard the next
day, the meeting was to come off the
next day but one.
In the morning the colonel was sit
ting at breakfast with his family when
the officer of the day entered.
Colonel" he said. 81 deem it my
duty to report that q challenge has
passed between Lieutenant Wright
and Surgeon Schuler."
The dickens you say. Wen see
about that. Go report them both under
arrest" said the colonel.
The officer was about to withdraw
from his daughter Alma, added:
Never mind the arrest, captain. I'll
send you orders during the morning."
After breakfast father and daughter
held a consultation in the library.
Papa" said Alma, won't you let
them fight? 1 know it's all about me,
and it would be SO nice to be fought
over"
You little goose. do you suppose I'm
going TO permit such a breach of dis
cinlinn Sir1rlU fifxy i'm
But I'd like to see If DR.. Schiller
will fight. Somehow I can't think bug
hunter can have any pluck"
Ali That's the rub, is it? Well, I'll
think it over and see if I can find
way to give him chance without in
jury to the service. Now, run along,
little GIRL
Guard mounting was barely over when
the officer of the day received a note
from the hands of the coloneps orderly.
The officer at once transmitted an order
it contained to Surgeon Schiller. Schiller
read the order and Immediately proceed
ed to his laboratory to obey 1t. He re-
NAMED there an hour. The work assign
ed him could have been done in much
less time, but he was ordered to use
great care.
Retreat was sounding when the colo
nePs orderly stepped up to Lieutenant
Wright and handed him an order to re-
port in person at the colonel's quarters
geon Schiller and handed him similar
order, at the same time instructing him
to take with him the articles he had
been ordered to prepare. When he
reached headquarters he found LieueGn-
ant Wright waiting in the colonePs
office while the colonel was pacing back
and forth with storm cloud on his
brow. Neither of the young men knew
1T. but Alma had her eye at peephole.
As soon as Schiller entered the colonel
| sat down behind his desk.
"I understand" he said, that you
young gentlemen, having no enemy to
shoot, are going to shoot each other.
Dueling is not permitted in our service
| and can't allow any such breach OF
| discipline. Nevertheless l am willing
that you should both have an oppor-
tunity to show your mettle, provided
| 1t can be done without attracting the
attention of the command. 1 under
stand that you, Mr.. Wright, consider
yourself aggrieved and have challenged
DR.. SCHUYLER 20
Wright bowed an assent.
And you, doctor; have you ac-
cepted ?"
II have" said the doctor.
VERY well. You, being the chal-
! lenged party, have a right to choice
of weapons. L will choose for you
Have you executed the order I sem
you this morning?"
! II have, colonel" he replied Won
deringly, and, unrolling a paper, he
displayed the sausages, laying them or
! the table.
These. gentlemen said the colonel
ARE your weapons. One of them is
| loaded with trichinae germs, the other
is perfectly healthy meat. Mr.. Wright
you, being ignorant of which is the in
| fected sausage, have first choice; the
other will remain for your antagonist
At a given signal from me each will
proceed to eat his sausage. Mr.
| Wright, you may draw"
Wright picked up sausage. Schu-
Ter turned pale.
DIR. SCHUYLER" said the colonel
! take your weapon
| Schiller reached for the sausage
and took it up gingerly.
Gentlemen, proceed"
| Both raised their sausages to theil
| lips, but before either had bitten 6
/ into the room, and Alma Kendall
rushing up to DR.. Schiller, seized hi:
sausage and threw it out of the win.
dow.
Gentlemen" said the colonel. "yor
are both brave men. and. having
proved your courage, it is not neces,
sary that you should fight. 1 trust
shall hear no more of this affair. Yol
may withdraw"
81 have no further cause for quarre
with DIR. Schuler.' said Wright, "anc
! must congratulate him upon having
received evidence of the tender solici
tude of Miss Kendall
"It is 'Hobson's choice" said the
girl, pouting. Either "a germ eradi
Gator or an 'unscientific butcher"
| Both men hung their heads ant
| withdrew without further comment
| a week later the engagement of Sur,
| geon Schiller and Alma Kendall wa.
announced by a general order from
the young lady's mother.
WENDELL C. NOLAN.
QUAKER REFLECTIONS.