The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-03-26
Our Daily $bcrt Story

ling's Confiuxion! Say, that sounds purty well now don't 1t? Wonder what 1t tastes like.'
 He uncorked a bottle with the as- sistance of his clasp knife, smelled 1t curiously and then tipped it up and took generous swallowI He set the bottle down with 8 wry face.
 Ought to be good" he observed 1t tastes like fury and smells bad enough to run a dog out of a tan yard
 "Be you going to try it7 asked Grandma Beaton.
 Try it" said the old gentleman.
 course I'll try it. I'd try anything to get shut O this mis'ry in my back. l feel it in my bones, sorter, that Gar rvs struck a good thing. Challing's Confluxion! We'll. by gum.'
 The first bottle that Grandfather Beaton took he noticed a great im- provement in his condition. With the second the improvement continued. His appetite got better and the "mis- ry'' was alleviated to an encouraging extent. Before he had finished the fourth bottle he was choring about the farm> Shortly after Garry received the following letter:
 ''shuckvi1ie. H., June 6.
 Dear Grandson Garry: T got your Confluxion all o. K. and want to say that I have taken it and it has made a new man of me. I suffered a mar terdom for years an the best fisishuns gave me no hope. I tried your Con- fluxion-but I'll write you a testymo- neal laater, Garry, and a ripp shorter What I want to say is that it's all O. K. and does me good. If you want some money to put it on the markit come and see
 Yours sincerely,
 Grandfather"
 Garry said, Well, I'll be darned" and packing his dress suit case took the first train down to Shuckville. He found his grandfather out by the hog pen trimming some rails with an axe to repair the enclosure. The axe was falling with a vigorous ''chug'' and his venerable relative was moving with the elasticity and activity of a boy As soon as he saw Garry he dropped the axe and greeted the young man with quite unusual warmth.
 Garry" he said, I'm glad to see you. That Confluxion of yours is the stun. Set down here on this log an we'll talk it over. I've an idee that you've got your everlastin' fortune made. He slapped Garry's knee.
 Garry cleared his throat. Grand father" he said. with a superior smile, T hate to disturb your faith in the confluxion, but I'll have to tell you that it's nothing but a mixture of all the patent medicine samples I could lay my hands on,. diluted with Lake Michigan. There's >Curine in 1t and Catholicona and there's Heeluquik- there's everything from liver pill to soothing syrup. I sent out two dol lars worth of postal cards asking for free samples and confluxion is the re- suit, You see what imagination does, Grandfather. You see this patent medicine idea Is all nonsense" He laughed, the callous laugh of callow youth .3 .-s Grandfather Beaton seemede to con sider a moment, stroking his fringe of white beard with his gnarled and horny hand Then he slowly raised himself to his six feet odd of height and the horny hand shot suddenly out and grasped the young man, by the collar.
 Play smarty with me, will your" de- manded Grandfather Beaton. He began to shake the physician in embryo. slowly at first. but with a rap- idly accentating movement. Garry writhed and struggled to escape. but the old mans grip was vice-like.
 I'll conflux yer'
 'Lemme go." grasped Garry. "Demulcent. salutiferous" rasped the old gentleman. still shaking ener- getically. Then he dragged his grand son to Ithe stock trough, wherein he immersed his head. four or five timAs. That's to reduce the expansion of your cranium. Garry" he explained as he released him. Its what you'd call therapeutic hydropathic demonstra- tion of the merits of confluxion. You'll admit it's done me good, won't ye' Garry?"
 'Ye-es. sir" said Garry meekly.