The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-04-23
GOTHAM FRIENDS ARE HARD ID MAKE Many Trials for a Stranger in
 New York SOUTHERN PEOPLE SUFFER Can Not Understand Why Residents of Same Flat Do Not Gall on
 Each Other-A Hard
 Luck Story.
SOUTHERN PEOPLE SUFFER
From the New York Sun.

New York life IS tyrant that soon molds into its own form that great part of the population which comes here from other cities. The rough edges of habit and rearing are soon rubbed off. After a while only an occasional peculiarity or pronunciation reveals that the origin or the speaker was more or less remote rom Manhattan Island.
 Perhaps the southerners who come here find it most difficult of all at lrst to get along in their new surroundings. They come from small cities in most cases and are impulsive, cordial and hospitable to an extent that the native born New York CT scarcely ever attains and is in no case willing to reveal. However hospitable the the New Yorker may be, he does not snow it with the frankness of the southerner on his first arrival in New York.
 The southerner discovers this dissim- iliarity of temperament at a time when he is going through the bangs of home- sickness. He is apt to feel that the traits of New Workers takes on an almost savage unfriendiness.
 lust to think" said young woman who hau been in New York for only short time, ''I have been living in this house six months with seventeen other families, and not a single person has come to call on me.
 We 0On even Spedk WHeh "S hiSSe iAA the elevator, although l did try to be cor dial to a few of them when 1 first moved in. They glared at me as If I were trying to butt into the sanctity of their families and they did not propose to have anything of the kind.
 ..one young woman was very nice to me and really smiled three times in one week when we met I almost Ter. mat had made my first intimate friend. She wasnt ,rl, I
 "At home when we have anything very good to eat we always like to send some of it in to the neighbors I've got such good cook from home, and she makes such delicious hot rolls that I sent some in last Sunday morning to the apartment of the friend who used to smile at me in the ele- vator.
 '.But If I ever do anything of that kind again 1 reckon I'll tcserve whatever hap pens to me Do yo1 know that woman sent the bread back with a message that she thought there must have been some mistake as her rolls had been delivered by the baker early in the morning and she couldn't imagine how I should be send ing bread to her
 .I never was so insulted in my life. The next time we met in the elevator neither one of spoke.
 Different In the South.
 "If such an apartment house as this was In the south we would all know one another, in addition to everybody else who lived in the block. If we didn't know them before we would go ali call upon them as soon as they came in the neigh borhoed, unless there .Jas something wrong about them.
 q said to the janitor of the apartment one day that 1 thought 1t was queer that people did not call upon one another when they move in. He gave me a strange look for a minute, and then said he didn't believe that any two families in the house knew each other, and he never heard Of anybody ca1ing just because they lived in the same house. That's New York Tor you"
 Some of the women w-.o come to New York from the south with the intention of making friends find it not so easy under those circumstances as 1t might seem, merely because most -,ew Yorkers have friends enough of thir own, and are not likely to become interested in other per sons merely because of their attractive character Where wealth and social inn portance are involve and strangers are in position to entertain or. be in other ways advantageous their welcome is like ly to be different. Few of the immigrants ir New York are wealthy. They usually come here to make their fortunes and are  tiveness
 q brought letters rom a clergyman whom 1 had known all my life" another woman said, and he was perfectly well acquainted with my position. I joined of his guilds at his suggestion, and there the principal women of his parish were most active.
 'I went to the frs meeting and was in- troduced to the president. She bore very well known New York name, and shook hands with me with some cordiality. The rest of the women were all present, and after a while the meeting began.
 None of them addressed a remark to me l sat .---e a bump on a log till the whole proceedings were over. Then got up and left without even ge.dng nod from the president.
 Naturally, never went back any more. but told the clergyman that l was not in the habit of being treated that way. He expressed surprise and wanted to know what I expected l told him thought that as newcomer l ought to have been introduced to the women in the guild. They should have at least paid some at- tention to me.
 "Oh 1 don't believe half those women ever see one another outside the guild room' he said. They belong to different sets of society and they meet only for church work You shouldn't feel offended. as they are in much the same situation as you
 "I never went back, however, as I did not want to make the mistake of being associated, even in church work with peo- pie who might be afraid to speak to me outside.
 The Last Straw.
 That experience was not nearly bad as my first call upon a woman in New York who had been asked to visit me. When I came home from that I cried for half an hour. I really felt mat an awful slight had been put on me.
 T went to this woman's house and she was quite alone. Immediately two or three other women arrived. We sat around talking but she dld not introduce me to single one of them. Ne spoke oc- casionally, and I felt myself getting red der and redder In the face because she should not consider me worth an introduce ton to her friends.
 After I learned that the practice of not introducing callers was customary in New York in some houses, l never felt any per- sonal modification over it afterward but I always make it point to introduce women who come to see me now, espec- ially if one of them happens to be a stranger in New York.
 "One of the first entertainments l went to when I fist came to New ork was a luncheon, to which I was invited by a woman to whom I had brought letters.