Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1905-12-05
OLD-TIME METHODS

gen rally wore out my OYorallH az the
knees am ny calluses was all on my
hands,. remarked the old man to the
farm assistant NOW. take notus,
when there's any patchin to be done it's
on the seat Of mans britches an the
rest Of the wear an tear seems % come
on his head It's an labor-savin inven-
-contrapshun to save Teller
trouble. spose It's an right but Il Amt
the way was raised. Look at you.
now
whats the trouble with me, Uncle
Dave?" asked the assistant
well, you may be all right; don't
say you amt, said the old man. "Ony
when you came to my sons huntin' a
job what did you do? You got out that
there diplomy you got from the state
agricultural college an commenced
gsssin about centrifugal separators an
electric stimplatlon OF plant life an nu-
tritive ratios an permanganate o. potash
an such like. An John, std o. sizn
you up to see whether you was stout
enough to do good man g work an and
in out whether you knew enough TO
feed a COW thout founderin' It an keep
sober when you went after the mail. asks
you II you can run a gasoline engine an
what experience you've had with soil
analysis. Gosh! Then you got the Job.
There amt no farm hands any more.
There's engineers an biologists an
chemists an electricians, but there amt
] no farmers"
"It's different. that's all. said the as
sistant we get the crops just the
same. but we do it easier"
That's the pint I'm maxim" said
| the old man. you dot easier. You set
on a self-harvester-bi binder thresher-
| sacker an go through a field o. grain
thout dom a lick more'n pushin but
ton or pullin lever, an then you
think you're smart because you done It
easy Look at you. | cd wrastle you
collar n elbow, or any hollis you like
an wipe the ground with you. as old as
am. l could lick you with one hand tied
behind me. | bet can pitch two loads
of hay afore you could one-but you'd
rig up a derrick an a portable auto
matte hay fork an save time an do 1t
easier. Time Amt you got all the time
there is? You git out an saw wood in
stead o. gettin' a steam engine to do it.
an your backll be the better for it.
Pump water for the stock an let the
wind do the work the Lord intended an
you'll raise some muscle on your arm.
Pitch your own hay an git chest OH
you; boiler acrost ten-acre field an i'm
prove your lungs, instid o. settin' down
to telephone"
"You aren't against the use Of ma
chinery, are you, Uncle Dave?" asked
the assistant.
mo, | amt agin machinery. That's
all right up to a certain pint, but the
pint is that you're runnin' it into the
ground. Look at the advertisements In
the papers. All Of EN- to save trouble.
Why waste time stroppin' razor? Why
! trouble to cook? Use the self-actin' this
an the already-prepared that an the
ALTERNATE t'other Don't fool away
time chawin' your vittles; eat the pre-
digested health food that will save your
stummick trouble. Don't use the legs
that you've been walkin' with; ride. an
save the wear an tear on EN-, or stay
at home an press a button or write a
postcard an have what you want
brought to you. We kin furnish you any
| thin you've mind to mention quicker
an cheaper an easier than you kin do
1t yourself by the old-fashioned meth
DDS. Amt that it? You bet it is.
Il tell you if this idee of havin' every
thin done easy an without trouble
goes on there won't be no use of hirin'
an We'll all git to be the orneriest. tri-
| finest, shiftlessest set O. people on the
| face of the airth. That's my Judgment
may be mistaken an it may be all right
to take life easy. but that amt my no
! ton of it, l don't feel natural with a
| lot o. machinery sowin' an cultivatin'
an reapin' an marketin an snortin'
an putin an explodin' all over the
place. Life wasn't meant to be too easy.
There amt no satisfaction to me to do
anythin' If it's too blame easy. / like
to go up against hard proposition an
beat 1t out. don't want machine dep
utized to do my hghtin' for me an set
back in an easy chair an watch il done.
I'll use my head with the next man but
want to use my hands, too, an the rest
o my body. BY jinks. they've even got
contraptions for maxim fshin' easy.
Il don't want to sit on traction en-
CINE to do my plowin'. l want to have
my two fists aholt Of the pillow handles
an feel as II was a-rippin' the sod up
myself. want to straddle the clods
an cuss at the horses an dodge the
stumps and in other ways work my BODY
as well as my head. | want to push the
saw an swing the ak, an shoulder the
sacks O. taters an hoist em into the
wagon. I'm man an not Jest a swell
headed thinkin' machine-or used to
be-"
TITS Just case of used to be- all
around, said the assistant. Chicago
Daily News.
London to Rome Wires.