davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09
Didnt Satisfy the Magistrate.


The other evening q man of the bur
glar type stepped up to an old gen
tleman and, handing him a piece of
paper, said:
'Sir, would you be good enough TO
read me the writing on this piece Of
paperT"
The individual addressed consented
and, moving toward the rays Of con
venient gas lamp, read the following
words:
If you utter a cry or speak a single
word shall shoot you. Give me your
watch and chain and your purse at
once and then pass on"
Completely taken of his guard, the
gentleman handed over the articles
asked for and walked off. A few
steps brought him to a policeman, and,
relating his story, the pair proceeded
in pursuit of the stranger, who was
not yet out Of sight.
Next morning before the magistrate
the vagrant was called upon for an ex-
planatOn.
Your honor" he said, Il am not an
educated man and can therefore nei-
ther read nor write Last evening l
picked up a piece of paper, and, 1t strik-
ing me that 1t might be of some i'm
portance, took 1t to the first person
met and asked him to decipher it.
The gentleman read it quietly to him
self and then, without saying q word,
handed me his watch, chain and purse
and walked Off without giving me time
to recover from ny surprise or to ask
him what he meant. 1t seemed to me
that the paper possessed a certain
value, and that he had given me the
valuables as a reward for finding It."
But the magistrate gave him six
months Just the same.-London Tit
Bits.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09
NO NEW TYPHOID
CASES AT BERWICK

Typhoid fever in Berwick and vic
Unity is on the wane. Many patients
are recovering and there has been no
new cases reported to the health boards
for the past ten or twelve days.
The above announcement brings joy
to the residents there. but it is by no
means saying that the precsution
should not be continued. 1t was the
cooperation of the people with the
health boards that helped in stamping
out the epidemic, and the precautions
of boiling water. and keeping premises
clean should not be discontinued there
or in any of the towns along the North
Branch.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09
TONIGHT'S RECEP-
TON IS PUBLIC

The reception to Mr.. and Mrs. john
son at ths Y. NJ. @. A, at 8 o'clock
this evening is to be a public affair
and it is desired that the public III
general be present. Mr.. and Mrs.
Johnson are DESTROYS of meeting every
body, and they want to get acquaint-
ed with as many as possible at this
reception.
There will be short entertainment
oy local talent consisting of instru-
mental and vocal music and elocution.
The young men are especially invlt-
ed as Mr.. Johnson wishes to meet
them all as soon as possible. Owing
to the reception there will be no gym
nasium class this evening. ~
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09

There is more Catarrh in this sectionof the
ountry than all other diseases put together
and until the last few years was supposed TO
be ncurable.sF a great many years doctors
pronounced it "A local disease, and prescribed
ocal remedies, and by constantly failing to
cure with local treatment pronounced 1t in
durable. Science has proven catarrh to be
constitutional disease, and therefore requires
constitutional treatment Halls Catarrh
Cure. manufactured by F. J. Cheney & Co.
Toledo. Ohio, is the only constitutional cure
on the market. 1t is taken internally in
doses from 10 drops to a teaspoonful. 1t acts
directly on the blood and mucous surfaces OF
the system. The offer of one hundred dollars
for any case 1t fails to cure. Send for circulars
and testimonials. Address.
FJ.CHENEY Il Co, Toledo, o.
Halls Family Pills are the best,
Sold Druggists, 75c.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09

Scotchmen are fond Of an argument,
and delight TO find flaws In an oppo-
nents logic. Two blacksmiths We're
once conyers.ng as to which was the
first trade ia the world. one insisted
that it must have been gardening, and
quoted from Genesis: Adam was put
into the garden of Eden to dress 1t
and keep t." Aye, John" retorted the
other, who had stood up for his own
trade, but wha made The spadesl'
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09
Executors S Notice.

Estate of Mary Louisa Gearhart, late
of the Borough OF DanviIle, County Of
Montour and State of PeDnsy!yani
deceased.
Notice is herel , given that letters
testamentary on The above estate have
been granted to lie undersigned. All
persons indebted 0 the said esta ate are
required to make payment. and those
having claims or demands against the
said estate, will n axe known tie same,
without dealy to
ROBER 7 Y. GEARHART,
NJ. GRIGR YOUNGMAN,
Executors.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09
Shot Small Cub Bear.

Harry Nuss. living near Maiuville,
shot one of the hear cubs that have
created quite a chase for a number of
hunters The mother of the cub was
killed by hunters near Bloomsbury
last week The cub was hard chased
by dogs and when il found the dogs
coming too close fed towards the
hunter, sat upon its launches as
though begging for protection.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09

Estate of Levi ]. Gibson, late of the
Township of Limestone, in the
county ofEMontour and State OF
Pennsylvania. deceased.
Notice is hereby given that letters
of administration on the above estate
have been granted to the undersigned.
All persons indebted to the said estate
are required to make rayment. and
those having claims or demands against
the said estate will make known the
same without delay to
ED. w. GIBSON,
Administrator of Levi J. Gibson,
deceased.
p. o. address Washingtonvillp, Pa.
EDWARD SAYRE. .GEARHARr.
Counsel.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09

Anon the public men in En.land is
a wen kny"n speaker whose remarks
are imaudible twenty feet away ana
Of him a wit said, No on" admireS Mr.
Y more than | 10. but | always feel
that am taking a liberty in ove.-
hearing what he says"
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09
Misfortunes Sometimes n blessing.

MisfOrtuneS Sometimes Blessing.
However others may think of 1t, yet
l take it as a mercy that now and then
some clouds come between me and my
sun, and many times some troubles do
conceal my comforts, for | perceive If
| should find too much friendship in
any Inn in my pilgrimage | should
soon forget my fathers house and my
heritage. DR.. I-"aS.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09

Suffering is doubtless as Givinely ap-
pointed as joy, while 1t IS much more
influential us a discipline Of character.
1t chastens and sweetens the nature,
teaches patience and resignation and
promotes the deepest as well as the
most exalted ught.-Samuel SMILES.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09

Little Walter was eating lunch when
he gave his arm a sudden shove, and,
splash, down went his glass Of milk!
Il knew You were going to spill
that" said mamma "HGrily.
"Well, if you knew" queried Walter.
"why didn't you tel nc"
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09

Mamma--Eo, dear, the Atlantic
ocean never freezes over. Elsie-Oh.
but It must. heard papa telling Mr..
Gayly that when Ec was coming across
from Europe the last time he had bis
skates on all the time.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09
POP GOES THE WEASEL.
The Meaning of These Words In the
Old English song.

The Meaning of These Words In the
Old English song.
How many people know the meaning
Of the words Pop goes the weasel in
the song? Many Of us have probably
regarded them as a meaningless tag,
having some dim Cockney bearing on
the animal. Such bearing they have,
but In an unexpected way. A writer In
Notes and Queries aftirms that the
words refer to purse made of weasel
skin which opened and closed with a
snap. This brings the line out Of irrel-
evant jargon into the main sense:
Up and down the city road,
In and out the Eagle,
That's the way the money goes
Pop goes the weasel.
The popping or swapping Of the
purse is declared to be the equivalent
Of Bang went saXpence."
But this explanation is not, perhaps,
so inherently probable as another
which makes weasel a slang term
for silver plate, prize cups, etc.-arb-
cles which. as the result of gadding in
the City road, were pawned or pop
ped" This idea is repeated in story
of an ISlington tailor who, through fire.
quentlug the Eagle tavern, had to pop
his weasel" an instrument used in the
cutting of cloth. Whatever the weasel
may have been, the song went round
the world, and many a boy in faroff
Brazil or Ceylon received his first idea
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09
Win Hope.

Banks, can you remember just how
much | owe you"
Thirteen dollars and twenty-five
cents"
That's tie exact sum, eh? Thank
sou"
''Well-why did you want to know"
81 thought perhaps you'd forgotten
It; that's all.'-Cleveland Leader
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09
Autograph Fans.

II was in China that the nrSt auto
graph fans were seen, and they be-
came very fashionable there long years
ago. Some carefully preserved speci-
mems have belonged to the emperors
and their wives, while others have been
given as diplomatic presents. \ fan
Of this description, for instance, was
presented by the Chinese ambassador
to Nine de ClauZel at the coronation
Of Napoleon l. In India the very first
fans were supplied by nature in the
spreading leaves of the lotus and palm,
but screen fans soon became emblems
of power there also, for they are not
only mentioned In the great Hlndoo
poems "Mahabharata" and "Ramaya
ma" but Brahma and India are repre-
sented in the ancient sculptures at Ele-
phanta followed by slaves bearing the
fly fan and parasol, which latter was
also considered as an emblem Of su-
preme power.
Sea Birds Thirst.
How do sea birds Quench their thirstf
Sea birds are believed to satiate their
thirst partly from falling rains and
partly from the fat and oil which they
devour ravenously when opportunity
puts them In their way. The keen eye
sight Of birds is well known, and sea
birds have been observed focking to-
ward the storm cloud about to burst
from all points Of the compass and
apparently drinking In the water as 1t
dssoends from the skies. They scent
a rain squall, says an old skipper, 100
miles or even farther off and scud for
It with almost incredible swlftness.
Sea birds obtain fat and oil from
the fish which they catch and on which
they subsist and they have also been
known to follow ships for considerable
distances, picking up scraps Of fat
which may be thrown overheard. These
birds are believed to be able to remain
for several days and even weeks with
out being compelled to seek for water.
though at the same time their marvel
GUS speed Of flight would soon enable
them to cover when neceSsar! the dis
tance between them and fresh water
on the nearest land
why Prison Doorkeepers Are surly-
why are the doorkeepers Of prisons
always surlyf ! guess 1t IS because
they have to answer 50 many foolish
questions" said a prison doorkeeper.
"Only this morning a ring comes at
the boil ! halt IN the middle of my
breakfast | tramp down the long cor
ridor | unlock my fifty ton door with
my twenty pound key. Outside stands
a tough young man, his hat on the side
of his head, who says:
"'Boss, when'll Joe Mace get outl
Me and another feller's got bet on It.
People come here and ask me when
this prisoner trial and that prisoners
trial take place They come here with
out permits and demand TO see pris-
oncr with Il same air as you'd 90 to
friends house and demand 10 see your
friend They bring presents to prison
crs-boycs Of cigars. bottles Of rum,
scarfplns ard poker dice. 1t is the con
stant rcbuffing of ali these foolish per
sons that makes the doorkccpnr Of Il
Drfson surly - philaIpluhfq ESiIlntin
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09
Elements.

Teacher-W What are the elements OF
the word? Boy Earth, water, fire.
air and Teacher That's all. isn't it2
Boy-And the lawless element.-Yon-
kcrS Herald.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09
Executors Notice.

Estate of Mary Lockhoof late of the
Township of Derry, in the County
of Montour ana State of PennsyI-
vanis, decca ed.
Notice is hereby given that letters
testamentary on lac above estate have
been granted to t undersigned. All
persons indebted 70 the said estate are
required to make layment, and those
having claims or demands against the
said estate, will make known the same,
without delay, 10
WILLIAM HOUSER,
Executor of Mary Lockhoof, deceased.
P. o. Address. Gi2 Bloom street,
Danville. Pa.
Edward SayIe Gearhart, Counsel.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09
EXeCutrix'S Notice.

Estate Of Julia Anne Bowyer, late
of the Borough o. DanviIle, County OF
Montour and State Of Pennsy ylvania,
deceased.
Notice 's hereby given that letters
testamcntary ON the above estate have
he' n granted to tie undersigned. All
persons indebted 10 the said estate are
requir' d 10 make payment, and those
having claims or demands against the
said estate, viii make known tie same,
without delay to
ANNIE Z. BOW YER, Executrix.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09
StOnge--CrOmley.

Albert B. Stonge and Miss Anna
Viola Oromley were married Sunday
afternoon. Rev. M. l.. Shindel per
formed the ceremony.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09
A VERY CAREFUL WOMAN.
Lady EIdOn Could Not Abide Any
thing Like ExtIayaRance.

thing Like Extravagance.
Lord Chancellor Eldon was energet-
ically aided in his parsimonious habits
by his wife, of whom 1t was said that
she and her daughter had but one bon
net between them. The Rev. r. 81.
Barham, author Of The Ingoldsby
Legends" records in his diary an
amusing story Of Lady Eldon's penu-
rlousness:
"June I, 1822.-The chancellor is
very fond of shooting. One morning
last year his lordship, intending to en-
Joy few hours spcP after a rainy
night, ordered Bob, the pony, to be
saddled. Lady ElGOn tsld him he
could not have 1t, but company being
in the room, gave no reason. In few
minutes, however, the servant opened
the door and announced that Bob was
ready.
'Why, bless me-" cried her lady
ship. you can't ride him, Lord Eldon.
He has got no shoes on"
"Oh, yes, my lady" said the servant,
''he was shod last week"
Shameful" exclaimed her ladyship.
How dared you, sir, or anybody have
that pony shod without orders? John" F"
continued she, addressing her husband,
you know you only rode him out
shooting four times last year, so l had
his shoes taken off and have kept
them in my bureau ever since. They
are as good as new, and these people
have shol him again. We shall be
ruined at this rate"
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09
DO YOU GET UP
WITH A LAME BACK Z
Kidney Trouble Makes You Miserable.

Almost everybody who reads the news
papers is sure TO know Of the wonderful
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09

cures made by DR..
Kilmer's s Swamp-Root,
the great kidney, liver
and bladder remedy.
1t is the great medi-
caltriumph Of the nine
teenth century; dis
covered after years Of
scientific research by
DR.. Kilmer, the emf
nent kidney and blad-
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09
Duy-En- Reminiscenc

Young Burglar What did YOU get on
your first haul? Old Burglar-Flve
years.-Detroit Free Press.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09

wonderfully successful in promptly curing
lame back, kidney, bladder, uric acid trou-
bles and Bright's Disease, which is the worst
form Of kidney trouble.
Or. Kilmer's Swamp-ROOt is not rec
ommendedfor everything but if you have kid
ney, liver or bladder trouble 1t will be found
just the remedyyo need. lthas been tested
In so many ways, in hospital work, in private
practice, among the helpless too poor TO pur-
chase relief and has proved so successful in
every case that a special arrangement has
been made by which all readers Of this paper
who have not already tried it, may have a
sample bottle sent free by mall also book
telling more about Swamp-Root and how to
find out if you have kidney or bladder trouble.
When writing mention reading this generous
offer in this paper and EYE
send your address TO @4lHE.SE 1ss:"3..s ::..s.
Dr. Kilmer & Co.. .Bing- sfss = I!..:s..s
hamton. N. Y. The 1al.sss4s9seR2o M9R
regular fifty cent and Home of swamp-Roo.
dollar sizes are sold by all good druggists
Don't make any mistake, but remem
Der the name, Swanp-Root, DR.. Kill
mers Swamp-Root, and the addres
Binghamton, NY =, on every bottles.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09

Sold b Druggists, 75c.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09
ADMINISTRATORS NOTICE.

The Penn Chemical Works. PhiIedsiHhi'
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1905-11-09
5OOO TELEGRAPHERS


fill the new positions created
/, Railroad and Telegraph Con panles:.
e want YOUNG MEN and LADIES of
The Cairo bulletin., 1905-09-11
PREPARING FOR BUSINESS.

There are many ways Of obtain NJ
an education for those who ara earn.
estly seeking H. Night schools and
business colleges are more numerous
and better Than ever before in this
country Moderately educated youth
can get good start in these 10 ahigh-
er education after leaving tha public
schools. They lay foundation for a
real business education by teaching
nor only the higher English branches
but by teach ng the theory OF business
Thousands OF clerks and stenograph.
ers graduate annually from them. Many
successful men are the product OF the
business colleges.
The best education, OF course. for
any career in life is that obtained al
the colleges and universities; for they
furnish the complete equipment most
desirable as the real foundation for
any profession However. there are
thousands who must begin the strug.
gle for existence during the college
yearr. To these the libraries, te n ght
classes and the commercial schools
are available; add 10 the course a
judicious system Of good reading and
the youth win find himself not "a far
behind in the race. --Sprngfield Jour.
nal.
The Cairo bulletin., 1905-09-11

Gals IN The number Of workers. The
annual leave or vacation allowed. and
geae-sl Asste. The was 3 pad arc
about tie same as commercial henses
In this connection, hcs ever. Mr.. Ros
siter d,aws attention 10 the nlssardiY
paylH, - Of the Public PRIMER ent hi,
chief clerk. The head of this vast es.
adjustment receives $500 year.
His chief clerk or assistant only 50
75a IL is asserted that the govern
ment printing office could not he
duplicated for $4,000, 900. What
commercial Industrial enterprise
would invite failure By paying the
head OF such an enterprise a salary
so inadequate for fhe ability required
1t would necessarily be placing mil
lions in the hands OF an incompetent
man. How the government finds able
men TO accept the position of public
printer at 81 500 year is a mystery.
England. Russia. and other Eu-
opean governments let the printing
'ontarcts TO private concerns. France
Austria and Holland are the only gov
rnments which maintain official /
rintiag plants. There is no doubt |
hat a government printing Office.
pm to all officials to the publication
their reports. invites wasteful publ.
alton Of volumes not needed, ami /
ften the printing of reports in such !
xpensive style is to be almost a
,andal. The expenditures of Uncle
am for the last fiscal year for gold
af were s3S.GS993; for skins. ss7..
-aying and cuts purchased from pri-
ite concerns cost s272.2i3.06. There
room for reform.
The Cairo bulletin., 1905-09-11
DUTY TO BE NEAT.

President Wheeler of the Unlver
sity OF California. has the right idea
In talk ng 10 his boys he said:
III is part of your education to
look prosperous. don't want anybody
to think he has 10 be dressed up to go
TO college, for we have no place for
dudes In fact. one of the distinguish
ing marks of this university is that it
Is an Institution for the poor mans
son, But man can have his shoes
hacked. He is bv this a more self.
respect ng mama better Christian. and
a better member of society. The wear.
ing of slouchy clothes has no excuse
II does not make man a beter Eel
low or more successful athlete.
There is no reason why students
should be dressed differently. We are
not peculiar people. monklsh in our
attire We are a part of the world
and We need nor affect uncouth STYLES
IF hats for all occasions.
The Cairo bulletin., 1905-09-11
POST OFFICE AND EXPRESS
COMPANIES.

I was engaged" says Miss Mae
Wood, TO watch over every move in
he post office department and report
to Senator Plat anything Of interest
% the United States Express Com
many =
Miss Wood, who was thus by her
)wn statement acting as a sleuth for
Senator Plat whom now she sues.
was az the same time taking the peo-
olefs money for work performed in
tha posg office department.
There are four reasons. John Wan
maker said when Postmaster Gener.
al, why we do not have parcels
post The first is the American Elk,
press Company. the second is the
WelIs-Fargo Express Company. tae
third Is the Adams Express COMPANY
and the fourth is the United states
Express Company"
The Cairo bulletin., 1905-09-11

special train TO enable them to take
midnight surf bath at Atlantic City
The hOnors would appear to be still
with "Seotty. whose s1O0 red necktie
$1,000 dog collar and $1,000 paid for a
long distance seventy miles-an- hour
train are fresh in mind.
Mrs. John Lane. in the Fortnightly
Review. pays a tribute to the great.
splendid, masculine spendthrifts In
high places who glorify the world with
treasures Of priceless art" These are
iordly crystal ewers and $4,000 prints
are investments which may double in
value.
II Is the Young man come into the
possession Of large means who sets
out 10 blow in his pile" spectacular
ly who best merits the name. The
Tenderloin occasionally sees him. Phil.
adelphia at present is, getting glimpses
Of his sensational extravaganza. 1t
VIII appear odd that he must take
lessons In the art from the unmtored
croesus OF the miningcamp and oil.
held
The Cairo bulletin., 1905-09-11
Historic Picture.

The Union Pac fic railroad through
lis general passenger department Is
distributing among It's patrons copies
of q very interesting ana highly his.
torlcal picture. 1t is reproduction
OF a photograph Of General ". Il. Grant
and party on the occasion OF .hpir Wis
10 Fort sand ars, two and nolf miles
south OF Laramie, Wyoming. station
on the l>pIon Pacific railroad Ths
picture was taken in 1867 and shows
the party grouped before the officers
quarters az the fort Among those m
tne party besides General Gram vera
General w r. Sherman, General p.
~ sheridan, General Greenville NJ
Dodge, General John Gibbon, sldn ~
y lion. the capitalist; General Fred.
erick Dent, General w. s. Harvey.
General Adam Kautz, General J. G..
Potter, General Adam Slemmer and a
number OF other notablas together
win several ladies' Most of the army
ohicers, except General Grant and one
or two others, are in uniform. The
ladies' are dressed In the rather mat.
tractiye styles Of those days. The pic.
lure Is quite interesting.
The Cairo bulletin., 1905-09-11
LAWSON ON THE STAND

Mr.. lawson. of Boston, may be plac
ed on the stand in the investigation
into the affairs of the big life insur.
anee companies being conducted BY
the committees appointed By the New
York legislature Mr. Lawson viii have
something 10 say, although of course
there win be restraint that he does
not feel when ne takes his pan in hand
t5 write a magazine article or an mi.
BUT II Il just al well To remember
at time when it is leaking out that
re big life insurance companies have
been traffick ng in million dollar
notes signed by ten dollar week
clerks, that When Mr.. Lawson first in
minated that the ife insurance com
panies were rotten he was lauged at.
Even worse than that, he was de-
nouneed for his reasonable traduc
tion Of Institutions which existed on.
ly for the good Of the widows and or.
phans,
But soon there was The Hyde d. n
ner and then II began ID get noisel
about that somebody neither a widow
nor an orphan in the INDECENT sense
was getting a little Of the BENEFITS.
For the gayety of nations as well
As for the squaring up Of Two or three
old accounts II is to be hoped that
Thomas w Lawson win tell all he
knows and all he thinks he knows. and
the names OF everybody he knows who
ought 70 know the rest Of the story.