Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1905-12-24
ON THE EYE OF
CHRISTMAS EYE

Twas the eve of Christmas eve and the
spirit OF the joyous Yuietide was In tho
City DISCOVERIES veins. tingling In his
sluggish blood and mounting to his head
like the fumes OF new-made wine. And IL
being the eve of Christmas eve the Dis
coverer had enJoyed-indulged himself.
he preferred to say-a bumper or two OF
eggnog, and. though 1t may have been
merely the Christmas spirit ane nothing
else. tits certain that when he lighted his
pipe and sat himself down by his own
fireside to ponder and dream and gaze
at the glowing Goals. he felt as IL the
world were a rosy, happy place. and TIE
Dtscoverer the rosiest and happiest NOR
tai In all its wide expanse.
But the Discoyerer was not to spend
his evening In uninterrupted peace and
quiet. for just as he had settled down in
his big chair, his pipe going like a blast
furnace and his mild blue eyes twinkling
with enjoyment, he heard a peculiar
noise at the window.
What can that be-" muttered the Dis
coverer. apprehensiveiy, as he turned
toward the source of the sound. Ora
cious! 1t sounds as IL some one were try
ing to break In"
And he had no sooner given voice to the
thought when the window neiselessly
opened and the Queerest looking indf-
vidual the DIscoverer had seen in many a
DAY bounced Into the room. The stranger
was short and fat. a regular roly-poly
person, all bundled up in warm-looking
furs that left visible only the ruby tin Of
his nose and his brilliant black ewes
And on his double chin was the singed
remnant of what had once been a long
and bushy white beard
Gracious, goodness met cried the Dis
coyerer. when he could get his breath
How dare you Come In my window, and
what do you want?"
T6a chnr Faf f,,, IL
no reply, but stood in the middle of the
room. his hands to his sides. struggling
to catch his breath.
why" remarked the Discoverer when
he noticed that the short Eat. elderly
stranger was not very formidable look
ing person, you are the living image Of
the pictures of Santa Claus"
I am Santa Claus" replied the white
haired old man, with an asthmatio
wbeeze.
The City Discoverer stared open-mouth-
ed at the little fat man. Il can't believe
that" he remarked at length, "for I've
always heard that. you came down tho
chimney.
"Tush, tush." said the little fat man,
petulantly, Il should think you'd know
better than that. These are modern times.
my dear sir. and Santa Claus, in common
with gentlemen of other professions
given to nocturnal visitations. uses
jimmy"
Goodness" said the City Discoverer,
with another stare. Then If you don't
operate in chimneys any more how did
you SINCE your beard?"
Tut, tut cried the self-styled Santa
Claus, in high Irritation. How ignorant
you are. singed my beard nearly Off as
you note. about flfty-five miles this side.
of the Arctic circle. My touring car
broke down, and in crawling underneath
to fix it my beard unfortunately got near
the gasoline tank. Then little while
later, later when enad a lighted my pipe, nearly
Touring car" calculated the City Dis
coverer. Who ever heard of such q
thing Don't you use your reindeer any
Great horns!" cried the little fat man
in his cracked voice. you must think I'm
an old timer. / want you to distinctly
understand that there are as many mod
any other"
Where is your pack?" inquired the Dis
coverer. after another open-mouthed
stare.
Sir" cried the little fat man. II haven't
carried pack in years. The distributing
that formerly attended to In person Is
now done by Santa Claus, Kris Kringlo
and Company, Incorporated. I am the
here merely on a tour of inspection. I
heard that you had discovered almost
everybody on earth and I thought I'd
give you chance at me-.
Il have always wanted to know where
you got the toys and other things you
distribute" said the City Discoverer. in
cOnnueRtlal tone.s
formerly" said the little fat man,
briskly. Il had a great deal OF COMPETE
ton, and the trade was demoralized. At
present I am supplied by the Christmas
Present trust. Our headquarters are at
berg $40, Arctic circle, but we have
branch establishments almost every
where. We pay handsome dividends and
low wages, and l must confess there Is
considerable ice in our stock"
"DQ you ever have any trouble in making
delfveries?' inquired the Discoverer.
We'll" the self-identified Santa Claus
replied, Occasionally we run into snag.
but even then We don't lose anything. I
insure my stock each year in the Deferred
Delivery Liability Company and II any
thing goes wrong the company suffers.
not l."
Gracious" cried the Discoverer as no
again stared at the little tat man.
.Well," said the stranger briskly, Il
must be going. told my private secretary
to sound the auto horn If I stayed longer
than should, and hear 1t now. I am a
very busy man and must keep moving
Goodbye"
The City Discoverer glanced toward the
window It was closed and locked as were
the shutters. The fire was nearly out ana
the room was cold. -. =.
ST have a remarkable taste In my mouth,
said the Discoverer to himself. Nv hat
dreadful stuff that eggnog is. Santa Claus
touring car-toy trust-Kris Kringie De-
livery company-who would have have
thought it?'