davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05
Two Million. Dollars


Have been spent to make Llquozone8
known. n We have bought the first bottle
and given it free to every sick one we
learned OF. Tho result is that one home
in five. the couAtry over, has some one one
whom Iiuuozone has cured These
homes are scattered everywhere, Your
peighbors ana friends liye Y In n sonle 81
them. Ic you will only usk what l4lqpo;'--,
zone does there are millions to tell you
about 1t. lii 4, 33 III
! And No paid slCo 600 a for tho simple
right to make Iiquozone--the American
rights. The rights In other n countries
have sold for proportionate sums We
mention this fact to indicate tho recog-I
nIzed value OF Liquozone. Men g have
never before paid such a price. for any.
discovery used In tho cure ofisickness.
Before We bought Liquozone, We had
1t tested for years. through physicians
aud hospitals in this country and others
We had 1T employed in every stage OF
every germ disease; In thousands of the
most difficult cases obtainable, For
two years, in many a disease called Incur
able, we proved that I4iquozoneg did what
medIone could not do. That was the
lenSon for its price.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05

Ing the Sfete. The royal palms from Porto
Rico, which formed the avenues on the
ground floor. reached aboyeat the FIRST bal.
$cony. Accentuating their grace ful fol,S5
age were threads Of: electric lights, SO
H placed that they resembled flight OF
IRE flies. and adding to the; dreamy Orien-
tai &envlronment. Aspara gus vines also!
dotted with fire flies, traced the way from
the cavern to the music stGhd, where the
&gayly uniformed members OF the Marine
Band and the red-coat ted orchestra added
a brilliant patch In life to the fe sta ia
Scene on the Floor.
IL On the floor was q scene OF dazzling
jbriliancy. rho gorg ous trapplngs Of the
Governors and the officers Of their staffs
the army and navy men, the jeweled and
richly apparelled court uniforms Of the
diplomats formed a setting for the thou
sands OF beautifully gowned women.
The ambassadors and ministers O. the,
diplomatic corps followed their old GUS
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05


Those who suffer from germ troubles
and who do not use Liauozome, are
Swroneing x themselves. You will III know;
nov much when You try 1t, Most36ot
these troubles arc SO unnecossary--so
easily cured itsls wrong to let them
continue. b !. Il !. Z. !. !. !, .
#AstrIal OF I.iauozonp cost not a penny.
gladly by ne ~, tIrst sets!e o1 co.
selves for It. Won't you--if sou . need reg
3it-nccopt that gift I5tsia5 Ill
Llquozone Is not unknown noW--nott
untried,t II has cured millions Or germ
troubles-troubles that drugs can cure
There is no neIghborl,oo d--no hamlet !.
so romote-thnt has not instances OF
what Llquozone has done, me cufeu
ones arc cverywhcrei doubtless some OF
your friends are among them.
You WILL regret these days OF waiting
when you learn what l4iauozon e. does.
You will wish you had abandoned wrong
methods and tried the right one sooner.
Please nsk about Liquozone to-day.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05
Not Medicine,

u t4 4 j ~
Liquozone is not made, like medicine,
BY compromising acids and drugs nor y
there any alcohol In It., It's virtues are
derived solely from gas, made In large
part from the best !, oxygen prouuesEs..
the process Of making takes i days
and requires immense apparatus a.
the end Of two weeks, we get one cubic
inch Of I,lauozone for each s5o I cubic b
inches Of gas used The attainment Of
this product has, for more than twenty
years, been the constant subje y OF sclel-
tific and chemical research. s.! D.
Sirhe main result Is, to get into q liquid,
and thus into the blood q powerful, yet
4 harmless germlclde, And the product
Is SO helpf so good for you&nnder any
cond ltIon--that even well person reels
& its Instant benefit.
This is the product which in the
mast two years has sprung into words
WIDE use in; 4 hs treatment Of germ dls-
eases, II As nov Used by the SICK 81 nIAe
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05


.gramme for the dancers. "a After an cx-
sql,isite rendition OF Invitation to the
Dance by Weber. rendered inlunson by
the orchestra and Marine Band. the order
5of the dancing was as follows; Z! 3s5s
Waltz, g Tales from the Vienna Woods,
"a t Strauss
Two step, Z Our President" Aronson
Walt z, .Adl yn' 81. u. Hail.
Polka .s.V ems Poupoulo'' ]. !. &. 81. Gauwln
Two $ Ter, J Uncle Sammy Halzmann
Prone nade The Voice Of Our Nation"
5t$ 4 a II, SnntlemanN.
Waltz, Cay Vienna + 3. /. Z. Y. Konzak
5Two-s step. e Ny Own United States, n 3i55
tfi "a nv II ts5 Edwards
Wal Z, Blumengo lister" a. Won Blon.
Promenade, II Laughing Water'.'.... IIager.
Polka, .yYelsbadener Promenade. zikoff$
TWo-step, Pride of the alton Droop.
Waltz. THE Debutante". Santlemann.
Promenade, I'm Old Berlin'., x. 4. Stark
Two step, with Shot and {shell"... Bilse
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05

,,o,r, and kent strictly 10 the quarters sl-.
lated them ~, the mort west gallery, But
tic Younger members took ,thclr chances
With tie cotlcotirsea OH the floor
After much rersuHsion, General WILSON
tho hairn1anf Of tho lii,tngnral Commits
tce, consented TO allp t5aS square Of a hun
drcd feat In the rot thda for the dancers.
the evening the Floor Conf
mittcc, With MIR G:orcornn Thorn ut its
head, formed u solid gter1dto @ to prevent
the spectators from eng pnclilng on tho
reyelcrs, 3 AZ the PrcsiN knt and Mrs
.13ooscvett did mot Join III he dance, tho
fret ntirnber oil the programnc WAS led
byl MIss Roosevelt with her brothcr,3Tl Go-s
dore Roosevelt, trnns her partner. Among
thc dancers we're thea daug liters Of two
nr1bassnd6rs, M iss Amy Durand| the1}rit-
lsh Ambassador, IND Miss Byde,l hspircz,
daughter OF the Mexican atnbnsaador.I Two
lovely dark eyed seroritas from South
America shared HE $honors of the ball
with the officlnl8 bellies, fiss Alice Rcose-
welt ana Miss Pauline " Morton. They
we're J Miss f,lesa walker MARTINEZ and
Miss elena Cnideron, daughters OF tho
'Chllnn ana Bolivian lt,sters. rcSpcc-
lively. Many or the chief executives 81
tho states and tic. Slatlies accompanying
them Joined The arevelcrs in the dancing
enclosure. ~ IN a. III .5
"a picturesque touch OF color md one
which added II truly tional signlficnrce
toSthe fetc, Wis the presence in the BALI
roonlof the famous Apache chief, Geroni-
mo. and his band sof braves, done up IN
the regulation war paint and feathers. ALL
other exceedingly interesting person was
Seth Bul.ock. Of Deadwood, S. DE-
scout, pioneer, rlainsman, the III,
Innate friend Of the President who
rounded up nil the cowboys formerly
members of the Rough Riders. But In
Difference to :lie occasion, Mr.. Bullock
MID his xix shooter friends had discarded
logging, inufti. spurs and socmbero and
were clad In spotlcss regulation attire.
even to patent leather pumps and silk
ties. "a! " Il 81 IS.
The Programme.
lieutenant santolmanil. leader Of the
Marine gand . selected an attractlvc pro- 1.;{
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05

waltz. Hydropat St Gungl
Polka, ~ Kara ma Grey
Promenade. "Thornas ] ffersoil ~ * Il
siSfi is sartlemann.
Waltz, E. Charms of Spring " NJ &C.!
Two step. ..rhe Diplomat 4. g R. SOusa.
Waltz 4 The Blue Dnnnbe Strauss
Ma tio,ial " Anthem, 4 THE Star Spangled!
Banner, . =. L. VS. !. i. Key.
Isl S4Att delightful supper was served In o
iflower-d ecked room. where the strains Of
music added szest to the dellcacys3 Of the
viands. There was q great crush in the
SUPPER room all evening long The menu
was IAN elabora to one {. The Presidents
party, had supper. In private apartments.
but the menu was the same, It was said
as that at the public tables. B; ssff i
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05
How Lid 10 ozone Cures,

THE greatest yaluesof Llauozone lies In
the fact that 1t kills germs In the body
without Killing the tissues, too, NAnd no,
man knows another way toNd do IT. Any.
drug that kills germs lis a poison, aud y
cannot be taken internally For that
reason, medicine is almost helpless ~ AZ any
germ disease, "a s.! Z,
Liquozones is n 4ger,micide so certain that
Wa publish ON every bottle nm offer of
81 900 for q disease germ that IT cannot
Kill. Yet 1t is not only harmless, but OF
wonderful benefit petter than any Ing
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05

doWr$tfc garlanded stnircase on the west
wing, the pagcant moved q ma esticaliy
to- tho center OF the court, through an
avenue green and fragrant s the 13otani-,
icni Gnrdens on Il juno day. Around the
magic cavern, which, occupies the site Of
tile fountain. II wendell its way i, thence,
through the$arcudc made Of hundreds Q
pillars fcstooned in fowers, back 70 the
west staircaisei to- the raised dais, wfet,te
tho dlstlngulshed guests looked down on
tho jewellers. Notsnore than five minutes
were occupied III the grand march. The
distinguished company hen took posses
zion Of the quarters allotted In q he sec
orid gallery. 8 Il u M 81 Il @ . II
The prcsIdcntial party left the the g gal
lcries for the supper room about " 1880
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05
soc Bottle Free


II you need Llquozone, and have never
used It, splcase send lis the coupon below
We will then send you an order on a. local
druggist for q fpl-sizel bottle-a3 h0csj
ibottlc-ands twill pay the druggist our
selves for It. This applies only to the
first bottle, of course-to those who have
never used IT, d; NJ KEN KS fsff
IA Tho acceptance OF this offer places You
under no obligations, We simply wish
toiconYince you; to- let tho product itself
show you What It can do, Then you can
judge by results as to whether you wish
to continue. y
offer. Itself should convince you that
Iiduozone does as we claim. we would
ccrtainly not buy a bottle and give 1t to
you II there was any doubt of results
you want these results; you want TO
he. vol Ind to keep we'll. Then be fair
enough to yourself 10 accept our offer
to-day. Let us show you at our axpenuc
what this wonderful product means to
you., 3.A f
III IIiauozone costs SOC, ana ST 4, fsT7-,
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05
{ Z I z
Cures { J i 'vEl Colds, and. and
@ II
( Prevents Pm

s#F Colds aise tainted wltllEGrip, In coiisc-l
.qteiicc, the. 1nnuenzn, ID fierce and bllfd-i
Ing; the Cough Ideep-sea and danger.
GUS: tile Sore Throat malignant and pros
ftrntIng. Many persons are confined TO
theft homes and even to their bods.
Tile prompt tlse sof DR. Humphreys
restores the checked
dho first gslgnSot taking Cold, y
starts tie blood 8conrsihg through the
veins bicalts zip lie Cold Or Grip and
prevents Pneumonia. 3ti e .as5
II At Druggists 25 cen Is, or NAL cd. IS
al Humphreys 1Ionieo. Medicine Cor Cor.
William and John Streets, New York. 8 VI
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05
n
IGRAND0BAll Held / !
Unfairly Garden } !. !. IN.
Opened with Tr'lu IN hal
MarCh.L Led blythe the,
.5.s' President d g t
PEN SlON BUILDING.
WAS TFsANS,F'O)' I ! y I:
Fragrant With Flowers and and
a Aglow With Myriads Of Elec- II
III tric5 Lights Dazzling Scene
NJ on Floor Of Ball III
Room Ended at D.
sSS Midnight.
n Z Il r d
fsnccln,lto INC ,ri,nes.Dispatch.}5

Especial to The Times pu1cl'I
II EWASIlIN GTON, March Al nto q p a.nI
s1,su, troni ~ IN rder tSagloW 9withtmyrlads
y ~, y /, x ,,,t 4, tcery
4 - ~ 3, ], u {,
Kind OF HOW .9" - ~ e
theodore Roosevelt, the Pre- sident q me
n u \, B, In 4 led the grand trIumph:ll
uh ' SUES ''u' - ~ Z h,,,
mo. / yen 0 - .,.S
or 10o5. BY his side, MS smillng,
s. ~,ifo was no less tho popular idol and
(. 4, , Z, /. Y, x ~ q ii gnyes AZ tllc
- 80. 3, y, q, III VI 8, t,,o
t.our o. : ~ stS5.
4 grand fete closed, the scene 8~ns 9 one o.
Il TIC most memorable in the socia | 3 hiss.
tory of3the8 American capital Not alone
4 ~.ns tho de orat ing, lighting and planning
a az Tic ballroom Il VI marvellous sue
cca.s. 35h,t&fhe %concoursc Of 81 people--ovcr
& ! n,,,vn iho,,aa r,d-na dc IT the MOTT bril-,
Mani and 4 DISTINGUISHED nsscmblage ever;
.hsitcred 4 4 ( yYn shlngton. ~
q {, !, !. 2, :, !, !, 4 %C1+l,er.
= ~ 4 80 =
As he inau surnl Sui
AL other previous orts IN , tile
OF The military parade, 60 me o.
the the PAIL, was .iss
most nasnii,cen. ua e ,ee ~, as asn,
49, - M uork h spcclsBof
IA Ron ann office into2n fairyland OF
s,rs., AMI uoId Over Il ftya tflonsa ID roses
,uera IN nked - lonp nc walls. in the GAL
@,sstes an1 y 10 d rcssIne rooms. # Spring
i,,os IN, \ tonn,ils nm rc ssus. lincs, tulips
azaisoa y zero liked ~ III abundant pro
1,,an,, Al nvar y Srca hundred 7treneI1 dousi
cassa 4 = green's were h shipped from B the
s,. = !, no - fla ntis 81 enough,
II .".,,a :, 7, ~, = ricf "a fcstoon
n, \ VANITY cltYs blocks n
w ny : ,nnc ala continental United states
.sI, ,a, roa s,,rnaf M f,ora was
81 - !, y, = IA elnrv tI,eat grand
81 Srnr, ot,erv, rortion off The
.nr,b y bcrs 1, 10 star spanried Banner
GU 49,. I, Ia grace
Il mr. ma III quaint rarlnnds
~ J. = 80. ,osannnd cyr,ress vines. Won
sso ron, ~ s SyoIca nc regions
~ ,aad "a !, realistic
4 !, :, =, 4, f.,
=, {. 49,, "a ,,nda From the
20 ~, M alorlo,,s at the bios
~ ,,,u,,vs nj nink flow
~ e, ~ been 70
rtn I, nirca ~ II - ooscvelt tia
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05
II Is w 1O1lg,

else in the world for YOU No one Is so
we'll that he cannot be helped by 1t,
The arensonsis that germs are veGe--
tables and Liauozone-iIkc an excess
ofoxygen-is deadly. to vegeta1 matter,
TO the human body Llquozone Is ex ;T.
vitnlizing, purifying--the$ most
ncedful, the most helpful thing possible.
But to germs i Is certain distinctions;
and these facts are true of nothing else
in existence ta n \ ~ IN lS3 IN
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05
ASK Us for Liquozone Free.

Goitre-Gout VarIcocele 5t 3ls9l,4
1onorrhea-Gl eet 7it Moments Diseases 5ti
3 All diseases that begin with fevers-all In.
ton-all s catarrh--alls 5 contagious dis
eases-all the results Of Impure or poisoned
blood, }s "a 81 4 s. u 3 A s,.Sq54 "a tis{ y
iyltallzer accomplishing what no drugs can do
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05

rhisf s Wldy EaoW
fo h snt hke
el
uvely b the e vo oe
bSss on S Is Eoo s e.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05
10 Suffer From 5 Germ Disease.

nations by physicians and hospitals every
where. It is daily used in millions of
homes in America.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05
Elias HaTtz, Famed as a.
Weather I. \ Prophet Told
Of Approaching cord
We a h elr, and Recon-
1rlended Duff Pure Malt
Wllis:|key as q Tonic, St; :tl,-
ula1lt and Safeguard.
4 Ain 81 Years Old ai,d Have been
Taking It for Many Years az ~ q
stilnulant and Tonic, and Recon-
mend It t. All Suffering From i't'lfl n
h Weakness Of Old Age " s3I

cribs will be d good winter. for the coal
tho the early assertion Of Elias Hartz sofS
reading Pa, the man who calls the ,,ap III
proaching weather from close pc q q; z
"a ppronchlng the age Il Of n Inc ty, Al =
1Inrtz has been 81 Gaming wea tn or ior w
Gusts from the breast bone OF u goose LOT
sixty five yea RS. 3i S$5 a 53
5si Mr. TIartz writes: It gives me pl easure
N, add my name to s your lis Of old
be ople1nrId tell you the benef 1t have
received by the use Of your pure Wis s.
4 a. years as d stimulant and tonic. q an
EaoW 81 years old, hale and hearty an. ana
hope to- live to q much riper Old age q .,pyS
arc gmfferlnE from insomnia, poor appee w
'tito%ard weakness OF n old & ago, : you'd
~ eerful ys recon mend Git as 4 Fiartz,
4GlogTcari Street Reading, "a M \. sSss
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05
l)(lffy's Pure Mali Mhlskey

hro,, eholt the country because8of his propnsoiss
ID Of the most rea and gh 81
en- viii live another o.
tic roses Of and tIii
thousands Of doctors and hospitals use y
medicine. no, frsel. oil "A ore
eniat on the label and BIO sure the se az oner sne
ctor's advice frees Malt "
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05
!. Gown t. II of Mrs. M ontague.

some beautiful gowns wer seen g t1lonTga
the visitors who came the goyerno rs '
Mrs. n ontaglle, wife of the Chi eff Exc ct-.3
tive Of Virginia, was a MAJ estic "a gurSSl ri
Il trained gown of rich crea M satin with
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-03-05

LlqNozone costs Boo. ana Sl..
The Tupelo journal., 1905-01-27
IN WOMAN'S SPHERE.

Miss Anne Shingleur is the only wom'
an in America understanding the opera
ton of cotton compress. Her home is
IL Atlanta, Ca, and she was reared lit
orally in the lap of luxury.
Miss Alice Robertson, postmistress al
Muskogee, I. T., is the granddaughter OF
Rev. DR.. Worcester, pioneer missionary
among the Cherokees before their re-
moval from Georgia to the Indian ter
ritory.
A real Indian princess, Melinda
Mitchell, descendant of Massasoit, is
being entertained in Boston by the
Daughters of the Revolution. She is
able to trace her genealogy from the
time of her illustrious ancestor.
Miss Caroline N. McIlvaine, custodian
and librarian of the Chicago Historical
society, has obtained some very rare
books and maps from the collection OF
the late Hiram w. Beckwith, touching
the early history of Illinois and the Mis-
sissippi valley.
The Tupelo journal., 1905-01-27
FOR PAsTEUR TREATMENT.
Anything, Even "Dad," So Long as
It Gave Them Chance to
Go to Paris.

Charlemagne Tower, the American am
bassador to Germany, spoke of the Amer
leans love of Paris at dinner that he
gave in Philadelphia, says the Cincinnati
Enquirer. ).
Our love Of Paris is no doubt, great, .
he said, but | am sure it is not SO great
as our European cousins would have us
believe We all, of course, have heard the
European saying: When good American
dies he goes to Paris. In Berlin, from
bearded French diplomat, | heard last
year a novel variant of this theme.
1T was at dinner party In Berlin.
The French diplomat, regarding, me with
smile, said he was sure | would sympa-
thize with the profound and ingenious
emotion of the young American girl whom
he was going to speak about. She lived,
he said, in a bleak western city. There
were in those days no institutes for the
treatment of rabies or threatened rabies
save in France. The young girls HE was
ugly and monotonous, and one day she
burst into a neighbours house, almost be-
side herself with joyous excitement.
Her dark eyes flashed. Her cheeks had
a delicate rose flush. Painting little, she
cried in a tremulous voice:
THANK goodness we are going to Pari,.
at last Dad has been bitten by a mad
dog"
The Tupelo journal., 1905-01-27

Going through the hospitals in our
large cities one is surprised to find such
large proportion of the patients lying
on those snow white beds women
and girls, who are either awaiting
or recovering from serious opera
tions.
WHY should this be the case? Sim
ply because they have neglected them
selves. Ovarian and womb troubles
are certainly on the increase among
the women of this country-they creep
upon them unawares, but every one of
those patients in the hospital beds had
plenty of warning in that bearing
down feeling, pain at left or right of
the womb, nervous exhaustion, pain In
the small of the back, leucorrhHa, dir
illness, flatulency, displacements of the
womb or irregularities. All of these
symptoms are indications of an I'M
healthy condition of the ovaries or
womb, and if not needed the penalty
has to be paid by a dangerous operation.
When these symptoms manifest them
selves, do not drag along until you are
obliged to go to the hospital and sub
NIT to an operation but remember
that Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable
Compound has saved thousands of
women from surgical operations
When women are troubled with ir-
regular, suppressed or painful menstru-
alton, weakness, leucorrhea, displace-
ment or liberation of the womb, that
bearing-down feeling, Inflammation of
the oyaries. baclzache bloating Tor fiat
ulency), general debility, indigestion,
and nervous prostration, or are beset
with such symptoms as dizziness lassi-
tude, excitability, irritability, nervous
ux,I:o E D;nLNou,yc VpNpfahIe Cor
The Tupelo journal., 1905-01-27
Whip Ii Out of Him.

In the schools of Connecticut
town, says the Baltimore Herald,
measures were recently taken to test
the children's eyesight. AS the doc
tor finished each school, he gave the
principal q list of the pupils whose
eyes needed attention. and requested
him to notify the children's parents
to that effect
One night, soon after the opening
of the fall term, a little boy came
home and gave his father the follow
ing note, duly signed by the princi-
pal:
Mr.. -: Dear Sir-It becomes
my duty to inform you that your son
shows decided Indications of astig-
matism, and his case is one that
should be attended to without de-
lay"
The next day the father sent the
following answer:
Dear Sir--Whip it out of him.
Yours truly, - -"
The Tupelo journal., 1905-01-27
HIS EXPERIENCE
TEACHES THEM.
That DOdd's Kidney Pills VIII Cure
BriGht's Dfsease-Rem Case
of George j. Barber Quick
Recovery After Years OF
Suffering.

Baskerville, Iowa, Jan. 23d-(Special)
The experience of Mr.. George j. Barber,
a well known citizen of this place, JUS
titles his friends IN making the announce
ment to the world ''Bright's Disease can
be cured" Mr.. Barber had kidney trou-
bic, and it developed into Bright's Dis
ease. He treated it with Dodd's Kidney
Pills, and to-day he is a well man. In an
interview he says.
Il can't say too much for Dodd's Kid
ney Pills. / had Kidney Disease for ff-
teen years and though | doctored for it
with the best doctors here and in Chi
cago, it developed into Bright's Disease.
Then | started to use Dodd's Kidney Pills,
and two boxes cured me completely.
think Dodd's Kidney Pills are the best
in the world"
A remedy that will cure Bright's Dis
ease will cure any other form of Kidney
Disease. Dodds Kidney Pills never fail
to cure Bright's Disease.
The Tupelo journal., 1905-01-27
GIories of War.

Major General Corbin, commanding
the Department of the East, tells the
following with reference to member
Of the militia of a Northern State tax
ing part in the recent maneuvers at
Manassas:
The guardsman was one day max
ing heroic efforts to get away with
his first ration of army beef. A fell
low soldier, walking near him, stopped
to watch, with some amusement, the
attempt of the Northerner to masti-
cate the meat whats the matter,
Bill?" asked he.
"Oh, nothin' much,'' was the sullen
reply. Then, disgustingly regarding a
piece of the beef that he held in his
hand. the Yankee added:
Now, ! know what people mean
when they talk about the sineWs OF
war.'-New York Herald.
The Tupelo journal., 1905-01-27
Bryan's Bluff Went.

William Jennings Bryan, while max
ing his recent stumping tour, found
he would be compelled to wait half an
hour or more for his train, says the
New York Herald. Taking a seat in
the waiting-room, he drew forth a CT
gar and lighted it. Just then por-
ter entered, and, pointing to sign,
said:
Il beg your pardon, sir" but you see
that smoking is not allowed in this
room.'
Well" replied Mr.. Bryan, Il sup
pose that rule is not always strictly
enforced?"
oh no. sir; neither is the one
alongside of it," said the man with a
grin.
Employees of this railway are not
permitted to accept tips"
Mr. Bryan finished his cigar undis-
turbed
The Tupelo journal., 1905-01-27
Nothing But the Truth.

My work" remarked the bald-headed
dentist, sis so painless that my patients
often fall asleep in the chair while am
at work"
Huh. that's nothing retorted his
rival my patients nearly all insist on
having their pictures taken while am at
work, in order to catch the expression OF
delight on their faces. Chicago Daily
News.
The Tupelo journal., 1905-01-27
Nothing Doing in His Line.

The Portrait Painter-I'm glad to hear
you admire my work, Mr.. Porkham. Have
you ever been done in oil?
IN 1t on YOUR life! Whenever them
Standard guys float anything, your Uncle
Hiram dons cork vest and then keeps
off. Puck.