The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-12-10

the satirist happy when he views the
performances Of polite society-the
modern thing, I mean, which we Dor
row from Newport and Washington.
mon Clay who assumes to be our so
cial guide and mentor, and his swathed
and sWaddled womankind, who con-
stantly are on the lookout for some
/ BODY to snub, are our first object les
sons of cynicisn. Take note and subt-
l ~ spice your stories with the superb
cial foibles Of men (and women, too
and you always win have a job.
The ludicrous blunders of men, what
the French call contretemps, mean
much for a newspaper writer. who
knows the value of color in a story.
overlook nothing of that kind. If it
don't fit in the story in hand, save it
and put it in another.
An amusing incident, of which I
was a witness, was an inspection by
General Metcalf of the "Chanute
I troops" There were seven officers
present resplendent in gold lace and
brilliant sidearms, but only two pri-
Yates appeared. One of the pair was
q chunky little fellow, who stood two
thirds Of him above his waist. and the
other tail, lank lad, whose legs were
three-1ourthS of him. There was a
weary wait until General Metcalf said
he guessed he could make a proper in
spection with the two misfits. But here
they met with another obstruction: it
was discovered that the corporal who
mad been sent out to round UP the
scattered troops" had taken the key
OF the armOry with him, and there
were no rifles with which to arm even
the two privates. The little saWed-off
soldier, however, remembered Il shot
gun across the way which he thought
ne might borrow. THAT viii do said
General Metcalf, and the little sawed
off man was sent for it. With this
gun General Metcalf put the two pri-
Yates through their PAGES. The adju-
tant performed the ceremony of
mounting the guard as if the two
soldiers were q regiment and then the
inspector general made, first the short
soldier, and then his tall mate. Shout
der arms, and order arms. and pre-
sent arms, and all that. The ecstacy
OF the run was that the general in
spected the same gun twice
Another funny incident of my recOl-
lection is bride receiving a wooden
leg for wedding gift. It was intended
Tor an old soldier next door, hi. the tx
pressmar left it by mistake at the
brides home. 1t came while the guests
were assembling for the wedding, and
the faithful old black nanny who re-
celVed and unwra pped it placed it
among the gifts unconscious of the fun
she was making for the occasion In
the meantime the old soldier next door
had some comrades in for a. key of beer
and winerwurst in honor of his new
wooden leg, which he had been notified
by the express company, was on the way
strange" he would say, hObbling to
the door and looking appealingIy into
the night, strange that leg don't
comet! could not use the incident in
the wedding story, but I saved it and
made column of it later.
In my experience is another wooden
leg story. A wooden-legged man had
gone to bed one Christmas eve, leaving
III
His daughter was gifted with thatnight-
mare of art, typography, and while ne
slumbered, thinking to please the old
man. she burnt his leg fun of snakes and
crows and things Of that kind. I put
whis<ers on that story and let the east
ern papers have it by wire.
My advice would be for you in your
lessons here not to confine your efforts
to the descriptive. Practice the mar
rative as well. The descriptive is the
first step, but the narrative is more val
liable, for it makes style and develops
literary character. The two go together
in newspaper reporting, but the art of
narration especially gives quality to
ones work. and he who does it we'll is
in the advance class of our trade.
Therefore, learn to write a succinct and
sequential story. Remember and re-
feet upon what You see in a days
journey. Learn to write out of your
head, knowing, of course, your subject
first. BY this means, we learn to put
ideas into words. Indeed, the practice
propagates ideas in the liberal mind.
Appropriate to your own use words
wherever you find them, but make your
own context. Words are common
property, but ones phrases are private
property, and, aside from the dishonesty
of it, he who begins by plagiary makes
slow progress.
So when you get started in the art of
reporting and have acquired a fairly
correct choice of words and formed a.
habit of advancing ideas without fear,
venture to write out of your head. Take
up the little utilities of life and see
what you can make of them. For in
stance, take toothpicks-their origin:
where, by whom and how they are man
/ ufactured; the material used; their use
and by whom; who supplies them to
/ the public, and so on. Incidentally, YOU
/ might start a crusade against the nasty
/ practice of using them in the presence
! of another person. I viii give ten dol
/ lars for the best article on toothpicks of
! not less than one thousand words and
! you may put in all the fun and ether
color that occur to you Typewrite
these stories anonymously, and we will
submit the bunch to our newspaper
/ friend, Congressman Murdoch.
Study the significance of words and
/ their shades of meaning, and thereby
/ broaden your vocabulary. Make the
vocabulary you thus acquire your
I everyday language. Don't be afraid
to use in your daily conversation
words that YOU use in print. By this
I means words will come TO You readily
! when YOU want them. Use the sim
plest words and always the Saxon if
possible. For example, the Saxon
word begin" is better than the
/ French word commence" Lincoln S
address at Gettysburg is in the Ian
guage of the people, and it is mas
terpiece of English that Will live for
| ever.
Don't load up your stuff with ad-
/ jeetives and adverbs. These arc
[ necessary sometimes. but a common
place use of them weakens their quail
ity and force where your story really