davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Paducah sun. [volume] (Paducah, Ky.) 1898-1906, 1905-10-12

II don't mind being a little liberal
or charitable, whichever you want to
call it," Conductor w. Y. Hansbro, of
the Fulton-Louisville accommodation
run, declared this morning, but
when | think l am being worked ]
have tendency to balk, sorter feel
like kicking myself nov for what
did this morning"
As the popular conductor deliver
ed these few ideas. he disgustedly
watched a smartly dressed middle
aged woman disappear around the
corner of the depot. She wore silks
and had two children who were also
dressed rather smartly. The woman
boarded the train at a station be-
tween Fulton and Paducah bearing
every evidence of prosperity, but
when the conductor came around for
her fare, he learned she was ''short"
a little. Her appeals for aid made in
a very modest manner failed to brinb
anyone to her assistance, and the con-
ductor felt duty bound to "cough
up" and he himself paid the balance
of the fare, rather than put her of
the train.
''lf was sure | didn't get work
ed" Conductor Hansbro declared. II
would feel better, but that woman
wears as good clothes as the higher
officials wives and feel somewhat
like man who has been worked
and knows IL, but can't prove it,"
The Paducah sun. [volume] (Paducah, Ky.) 1898-1906, 1905-10-12
An Interesting Meeting.

p Tho McCracken County Mcilea
society held It's FIRST winter meeting
with Dr.. w. }. BASS last night at the
latter's Office on Broadway There
was a good crowd and DR. lass held
Il clinic, operating on a colored pa
The Paducah sun. [volume] (Paducah, Ky.) 1898-1906, 1905-10-12
: Held short session.

The fourth quarterly conference Of
the Broadway Methodist church held
short session last evening and ad-
journed until November o, when the
final reports of the church will be
made before the annual conference
meeting ON November H.
The Paducah sun. [volume] (Paducah, Ky.) 1898-1906, 1905-10-12

a. j. Casey. formerly of Owens
boro, will be editor of the new paper
to be started at Clarksville, Tenn.
The paper will be the organ of the
Dark District Tobacco Growers as
sociation>
The Paducah sun. [volume] (Paducah, Ky.) 1898-1906, 1905-10-12

With well-balaaced company,
Mr. Fred Wycoff pleased a fairly
large audience last night in "uncle
Danl." Il Is play OF simple folk
and every day life. and the pictures
ire faithfully drawn. Uncle Dan'f'
a character that arouses admira-
ON and sympathy, and Mr.. wycoff
loes excellent work throughout the
four acts of the play Minnie
Church as CLIP" is clever little
woman and the other parts were vel.
cast. Mr.. Wycoff. who is not a stfan-
ger in Paducah, is the largest part of
the show, however, and his Uncle
Danl" is delight.
The Paducah sun. [volume] (Paducah, Ky.) 1898-1906, 1905-10-12

Great Britain's output OF bicycles
for 1905 is estimated at from $50.
600 to 100000. To Coventry is as
signed 100000 of these. and 10000
- Asmngham, Wolverhamplon,
Id nottingham,
The Paducah sun. [volume] (Paducah, Ky.) 1898-1906, 1905-10-12

Doctor-"Do you ever hear a buzz
zlng noise in your ears?" Patient
"Of course, doctor, ! thought yon
knew her." Doctor--"Knew whom"
Patient-"My wife. Philadelphia
Press.
The Paducah sun. [volume] (Paducah, Ky.) 1898-1906, 1905-10-12

The T,beian comic opera. "Thc
Forbidden Land" is again coming
this way-an announcement which
'ocal theatre goers will hear with sat
isfaction. Since its presentation
here last season 1t has received the
praise OF the public of New York
City, where it's novelty and br' ght-
ness and its brilliant comedy were
4 surprise TO those Gotham critics
who have been saying that nothing
IN the way of novelty can come on.
Of the west. The company this sea-
son is practically the same as seen
here with the exception OF a few
,hanges in tn. cast which have great
y improved the organization. 1t
will be here Oct. 81.
The Paducah sun. [volume] (Paducah, Ky.) 1898-1906, 1905-10-12
FISHER g. Sinks
agssy ELECTRICAL CONTRACTORS
Adl 2O9 S. Fourth ST. Phones

tent for dllatlon of blood vessel IN
The neck. The next pceliug will be
Oct sSth with Dr. Frank Boyd. pa
pcrs BY prs. Boyd and Purcell.
The Paducah sun. [volume] (Paducah, Ky.) 1898-1906, 1905-10-12

Advertising car No OF the Ring
ling Brothers circus arrived last
night and was sidetracked at the
passenger depot. The bill posters are
at work putting on the second post
ers. There will probably be one or
two more cars to come before the
circus arrives and the town will nsv-
er be better billed for any attraction
than this circus when the advertising
men get through with their work.
The Paducah sun. [volume] (Paducah, Ky.) 1898-1906, 1905-10-12

Ridicule is the frs; and last ar
gument of fools.--C. Simmons.
The Paducah sun. [volume] (Paducah, Ky.) 1898-1906, 1905-10-12

Our affections are our life. We
i've by them; they supply our
Claiming.
The Ladysmith news and Ingram news. [volume] (Ladysmith, Wis.) 1905-1906, 1905-05-27
Setting Himself Straight.

George Washington Thomas, an
able-bodied negro of Sleepy Hollow,
appeared before Magistrate Nussbaum
charged with stealing chickens. The
negro was accompanied by his law
yer, Col. Simmons, rising young
white attorney. The old Judge saun-
tered into the dingy court room where
he had reigned for more than twenty
years, and after calling for order he
looked around on the little company
there assembled. Seeing George
Washington Thomas, he pointed to
him and said:
"Be you the defendant in this case?"
"Quick as a fash George was on
his feet. and, not understanding legal
terms, he exclaimed politely:
"No, sab; no, sab; amt de-fen'ant;
dar's de'fen'a ant ovah dar." And say
ing which he pointed to his lawyer.
There was a general laugh about the
room, in which the queer old Judge
joined heartily. The darkey felt abash-
ed. He was visibly embarrassed, and
thinking to correct the mistake. If
mistake it were, he said again, point
ing at his lawyer: "Yas, sab; he's de-
Tenant" and, pointing to himself, he
said: Use de gent'man what stole de
chickens "-LippincOtt's
The Ladysmith news and Ingram news. [volume] (Ladysmith, Wis.) 1905-1906, 1905-05-27
Worcester Sauce.

In some of his recollections the
American author, Mr.. Owen Wister,
tells a good story concerning himself.
Some time ago while in Washington
he was presented to the wife of high
government official-a very ample"
lady, and one whose appearance indl-
Gated that she possibly enjoyed the
material comforts Of life more than
the esthetic.
When Mr.. Wister's name was men
toned she regarded him with consld-
cradle interest, and the author began
to think that something very compll-
mentary was going to be said concern"
ing his books. The lady beamed once
or twice in a preliminary sort OF way
and then remarked with genuine feel
ing:
"You know it's often very hard to
catch the names of people who are IN
troduced to you, and sometimes It's
hard to remember them. But in your
case it's so different. I really want to
tell you, Mr.. Worcester, how mucn
like your sauce!"
The Ladysmith news and Ingram news. [volume] (Ladysmith, Wis.) 1905-1906, 1905-05-27
The ignorant Landsman.

Capt Kaempf, Of the Deutschland
was entertaining a little group OF
passengers with sea stories.
"Why is it," said Capt. Kaempf,
that landsmen are so ignorant Of the
sea? Seaman are not ignorant OF the
land. 1t is only, in fact, through
knowing the land we'll enough to avoid
it, that seamen keep their ships afoat.
"But Iandsmen's ignorance of the
seat is deplorable.'
"In Bremen, one day, I saw farm
er looking at the shipping in the har-
Dor. A 'longshoreman was explaining
the shipping to him. Finally heard
the 'longshoreman say:
"'It is low water, now, sir.
'sThe farmer took his pipe out Of
his mouth and pointed it solemnly
toward heavily-laden tramp steamer
that was passing.
cts a good thing for that vessel
going past that it is low water, he
said. The waters near over the edge
of her now"
The Ladysmith news and Ingram news. [volume] (Ladysmith, Wis.) 1905-1906, 1905-05-27
Mrs Chester Curry.

one woman in twenty-five but what
suffers with some arrangement OF the
female organism, and this is the secret
of so many unhappy homes.
No woman can be amiable, light
hearted and happy, JOY to her hus-
band and children, and perform the
duties incumbent upon her, when she is
suffering with backache. headache,
nervousness, sleeplessness, bearing.
down pains, displacement of the womb.
spinal weakness or ovarian troubles
Irritability and snappy retorts take
the place of pleasantness, and all sun
shine is driven out of the home, and
lives are wrecked by womanS great
enemy-womb trouble.
Read this letter:
II was troubled for eight years with lrregu:
larities which broke down my health and
brought on extreme nervousness and despon-
dency. Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Com
Mound proved to be the only medicine which
helped me- Day by day improved in health
while taking it until | was entirely cured.
can attend to my social and household duties
and thoroughly enjoy life once more as LYDIA
II Pinkham's Vegetable Compound has made
me a we'll woman, without an ache or pain"
Mrs. Chester Curry, AZ Saratoga Street.
East Boston, Mass.
At she first indication of i'll health,
painful or irregular menstruation,
pain in the side, headache, baclSache,
bearing-down pains, nervousness or
"the blues" secure at once bottle of
lydia f. Pinkham's Vegetable Com.
pound ana begin its use.
The Ladysmith news and Ingram news. [volume] (Ladysmith, Wis.) 1905-1906, 1905-05-27
The Mean Godfather.

Congressman Morrell, of Philadel-
phia, in a discussion Of the Delaware
river appropriations, mentioned a
mean man.
There are many mean men" he
said, "but this man surely was the
meanest OF them all. Besides being
mean he was also rich.
Ito a poor young couple living near
him a son was born and they decided
to name their son after the mean man,
and to ask him to stand as it's god
father
"He consented He was fattered.
"Thereupon the JOY of this poor
young couple was great. They won
dered what gift the rich godfather
would give to his little godson. Per
haps house and lot? Perhaps half
dozen government bonds? Perhaps a
herd of cattle?"
Senator Morrell paused and smiled.
"What do you suppose" he said,
'the mean man sent the youngster
He sent it, sir, a cup that one of his
Cochin China hens had won at poul'
try show"
The Ladysmith news and Ingram news. [volume] (Ladysmith, Wis.) 1905-1906, 1905-05-27
"ExcIanatory" All Riqht.

While the oil excitement was at its
height in Texas several years ago
John w. Gates put up at hotel in
Beaumont where colored girls are
employed as mattresses.
At the dinner table, on the even
ing Of his arrival wishing to be pleas
ant to the girl, who had taken great
pains to see that he had everything
he wanted, he turned to her and said,
not knowing whether she was mar
ried or not: How is your husband,
Eliza?'
Gle amt much bettah, Sah,' re-
piled the girl.
ooh, then he's been sick. What's
the matter with him" asked Mr..
Gates.
why, de doctah say he got ex-
clamatory rheumatism, Sab"
Explanatory rheumatism! You
mean infammatory, don't you? Elk
clamatory means to cry out" said Mr..
Gates.
Oats jes' it, Sab. OATS jes' it.
He do nuthin' but cry out all de time
New York Times.
The Ladysmith news and Ingram news. [volume] (Ladysmith, Wis.) 1905-1906, 1905-05-27
LEWIS G. CLARK EXPOSITION.

1t is a noteworthy fact that the Lew
is and Clark Exposition is the first
worlds fair to be held west of the
Rocky Mountains which has secured
the aid of the government.
"And it is also surprising what an in
terest is manifested in the exposition
by the people of the East. They see
in the exposition an opportunity to visit
the Western country at a greatly re-
duced expenditure of money, and not
only see the Exposition itself, but view
the wonders of our Western scenery,
and witness the great resources Of the
Northwest and the opportunities af-
forded. The Great Northern Railway
passenger department has been flood
ed with inquiries as to the exposition,
and it augurs we'll for big travel
through the Northwest this year.
The Ladysmith news and Ingram news. [volume] (Ladysmith, Wis.) 1905-1906, 1905-05-27
Theirs the Memory That Endures.


The highest honor OF which tney
dreamed in life is theirs whose graves
are strewn to-day with the flowers OF
spring. The proud young natlon
which they helped to save holos
them, and will ever hold them IN CRATE
fu1 remembrance. They made the SUI
nreme sacrifice and they reaped the
s1nreme reward. Theirs it is to be
cherished forever in the nation
heart.
And what of the men who march
to-day? Their wavering footsteps, as
thew follow the music of drum and fife,
their thinning ranks remind us that
they. too, soon will be the recipients,
not the instruments, of the honors OF
Memorial day. Their place is secure
The inspiration of their deeds Will
live when their dust has mingled with
their comrades and their very names
are forgotten.
Ay, the boys of 81 will live forever.
The lessons of self-sacrifice, devotion
and patriotism which they have taught
cannot perish so long as Gods sun
shines and Gods world endures.
The Ladysmith news and Ingram news. [volume] (Ladysmith, Wis.) 1905-1906, 1905-05-27
He Waited,

"Supposing you wait here in this
comfortable seat by the elevator while
I match these two samples of ribbon"
said Mrs. Mayfair sweetly to her hus-
band, who had been entrapped into go
ing shopping with her. When she
came back she said contritely:
"Have / kept you waiting an unpar-
donably long time, you poor dear?'
"Oh, haven't minded it, he said,
cheerfully. 81 just jumped onto a car
and ran out to the league grounds and
saw most of the ball game, and then
l took little spin in the park with
Dorton in his new auto. Did you
match the samples?"
zone of them. It's so provoking.
I'll have to come again tomorrow, for
they're closing the store now."-Lip-
piEcott's.
The Ladysmith news and Ingram news. [volume] (Ladysmith, Wis.) 1905-1906, 1905-05-27
Milk Saloons of Warsaw.

The town of Warsaw may be called
the milk producers Eden. although
the milk consumers Eden it certainly
is not. There is probably nowhere
such a milk town" as this. Restau-
rants are but little frequented. On
the other hand, the public frequent
the various dairies in great number in
order to chat with friends or read the
newspapers, to the accompaniment of
q black or white coffee or a glass OF
cold or warm milk, To close a bar
gain or to talk business. the milk sa-
loon is resorted to; chess and bill
lizards are likewise to be played in
these recognized places of public re-
sort. But, in spite of this enormous
consumption of milk, the supply is OF
the most wretched; in fact it is in
descri5ably bad.-Creamery Journal.
The Ladysmith news and Ingram news. [volume] (Ladysmith, Wis.) 1905-1906, 1905-05-27

century soil tiller has practically all
the modern comforts. His mall Is de-
livered daily. He has telephone con-
nection with the buying and selling
world, affording the best opportunities
for marketing to advantage. His
home Is of recent architecture, con-
structed of wood, brick or stone, and
we'll furnished. He has modern plumb
ing and modern heating, ana VITA the
advent of acetylene gas, he has mod
ern lighting. At night his home is as
attractively illuminated as that Of his
city brother, for 1t is a suggestive fact
that "acetylene for country homes"
has so appealed to the farmer, that OF
the $4,000 users Of acetylene gas IN
the United States, the farmer Is one
of the largest of all classes. Ever
seeking the best, he has not hesitated
in availing himself Of this new light
The continued growth and progress
of this great country, ever cause OF
wonderment, has no greater exempll'
fication than evolution on the arm.
Already the farmer is becoming the
most envied OF men-the freest, the
healthiest, the happiest!
The Ladysmith news and Ingram news. [volume] (Ladysmith, Wis.) 1905-1906, 1905-05-27
Snide LIGHTS on History.

Scott had just written "The stag at
eve had drunk his fill"
Gust like all them stag parties" he
commented.
Bewaliing the tendencies Of the
times, he dashed off twelve more STAN
zas.
Henry XIII. had just divorced anoth-
err wife.
'You see," he explained, there
were too many queens in the deck and
I thought the cards had been stacked"
With a regal air he dispatched a
messenger Of Anne Boleyn.
Horatius was at the bridge.
"Heavens!" he said. 81 won't get
to Brooklyn till o'clock"
Pushing his way through the crowd
he telephoned his wife to keep dinner
warm.
The Ladysmith news and Ingram news. [volume] (Ladysmith, Wis.) 1905-1906, 1905-05-27
DR.. STEPHENSON

rade repOses, all unconscious that MS
hour of triumph has come.
''The law of compensation pervades
all nature. A new thought proclaimed
a good deed done or heroic act per
formed will sooner or later meet It's
proper reward. 1t may tarry long; II
may linger in it's coming, but come II
b will. with unfailing certainty. In ODE
dience to that law we have come even
at this late day to do honor to our de-
Darted comrade and friend. Let us
not stop here let us by some httlng
testimonial proclaim to all coming
our appreciation of the grand work &C
complished by our departed friend
and companion. Let us
Seek no further his merits to disclose;
Nor draw his frailties from their oredu
abode. 80
There they alike in trembling hope re-
The bosom of his Father and his Coo.
Mrs. John A. Logan in Cincinnati
Enquirer.
The Ladysmith news and Ingram news. [volume] (Ladysmith, Wis.) 1905-1906, 1905-05-27
ATE EVIDENCE AGAINST HIM
Prisoner Stops Trial by Chewing and
Swallowing Forged Check.

Prisoner Stops Trial by Chewing and
Swallowing Forged Check.
The Kings county court was thrown
into disorder and dismay, says Seat
tie special to the ST. Louis Post-Dis-
patch, when the prisoner at the bar,
H. r. McTavish, ate all the evidence
in the case on trial McTavish was
being tried on charge of forging a
SIS check. The check lay on the trial
table, marked exhibit A." McTavish
sat beside his counsel, who was en-
gagged in cross-examining a witness
for the prosecution.
The case was going against Nc
lavish when his eye fell on the check
which was about to be introduced in
and with look Of hunger in his eye,
the prisoner bounced upon exhibit A
and chewed it to pulp.
With soulful satisfaction he gulped
it down. The prosecution was in con-
sternation, for it's main piece OF evil
dence was gone, and demanded that a
stomach pump be used forthwith
While the lawyers argued pro and con,
the prisoner calmly picked his teeth
with a Whitfield match, plainly the
master of the situation. The defense
argued that the ball Of paper in the
defendants stomach could in no wise
be construed as documentary evil
dence, and that a dismissal was prop
er.
The case of the state Of Washing
ton against H. r. McTavish is now in
statu quo pending the untangling of
the legal question involved from the
defendants impromptu luncheon.
The Ladysmith news and Ingram news. [volume] (Ladysmith, Wis.) 1905-1906, 1905-05-27

The destinies of the Grand Army
have been presided over by the truest
and the best. From it's very inception
the Grand Army of the Republic was
destined to a great and noble WORK.
and to supply place in the desires
of patriotic men that no other nad
been able to do. The provision es-
chewing politics and religion and pro-
viding for the banding together under
the most sacred obligations to work
together for the defense OF their cOun-
try, for the alienation of each others
woes, for the uplifting and betterment
of each other and those dependent
upon them, touched responsive chord
IN the heart of every soldier who knew
by experience that every man VINO
signed such an obligation would be
true to it.
The plan for the organization OF
posts in e1 cry hamlet, town and city,
and to unite them in departments IN
every state, and once year to meet
in a grand national encampment,
would insure the perpetuity of their
comradeship, that the post would sup
ply the place of the soldiers regiment,
the convention of the department OF
the state his corps. and the national
encampment that of the army to
which he belonged.
At the campfires of these meetings
he could live over again scenes which
were burned into his memory by the
heat of battle. He would have re-
source in every dilemma that might
overtake him through life, and
The Ladysmith news and Ingram news. [volume] (Ladysmith, Wis.) 1905-1906, 1905-05-27
NOBLE WORK DONE BY G. A. R.
Magnificent Organization Is First Among the
Brctherhoods of Men

when this thought first came to
our cOmrade his whole soul was filled
with the grand conception. Without
rest or WEAKNESS his every energy
was devoted to the accomplishment OF
the grand desire. With a patriotic
inspiration he saw clearly the great
goal to be attained He felt that he
was erecting an altar upon which the
fire of love for the whole Union would
burn and burn forever. He saw with
prophetic vision the Star Spangled
Banner of the natiOn-nOt confeder-
alton of discredited states, but a ma
TONS banner unfurled to the breeze;
and with fancy's ear he heard the
tramp of millions of soldiers of the
Grand Army as they gathered beneath
it to shield and defend it from every
harm.
my friends, how we'll he read the
future! His grand anticipations are
more than realized. The camp fires OF
the Grand Army are burning from
ocean to ocean Thousands and tens
OF CnOuSauuS VI HIS DlOtHSl AOOu VI
soldiers meet nightly in fraternal
greeting. The banner that he SO loved
is floating stainless and pure in Gods
bright sunshine, never again to be
soiIed and torn by traitors hands.
Though not here to witness it, the
grand dream Of his life has assumed
the proportions of a bright reality.
The note that he struck single-handed
is Illuminating an entire land and at
the last is mingling it's radiance over
the consecrated spot where our COM
The Ladysmith news and Ingram news. [volume] (Ladysmith, Wis.) 1905-1906, 1905-05-27

friends to succOr him in sickness and
misfortune and who would follow him
to the grave when he was finally mus
tered out. The ritual appealed so
strongly to them that to-day, forty
years after the war, the Grand Army
of the Republic is many thousands
strong.
It has borne upon it's rolls more than
900 900 ex-Union soldiers. 1t has ex-
nended thousands Of dollars in charity
for it's members and their families. To
the Grand Army of the Republic more
than to any other order do the unfor-
tunate look for aid. If a comrade is
sick he sends to his post for sympathy
and help. If he seeks employment he
can rely upon his comrades to vouch
Cor him. He knows when the end comes
that he will be laid to rest by the
members of his post, and that stone
will mark his last resting place, and
that il will never be reared in pot
ter's field, and that each recurring
Goth of May flowers will be strewn
above the low green mOunQS Wnefe
sleep the loyal dead.
It is a curious fact that the genius
who was the author of so magnificent
an organization should have been in
his last days one Of the very I'M
fOrtunates for whom he was so sole
itous in his halcyon days.
Overtaken by misfortunes and an
iIl-starred fate, DR.. Stephenson, after
wears Of Encouragement, died and was
buried at Rock Creek, Menard county,
ILL.,, Aug. 30, 1871. though scarcely at
the zenith of his manhood. Aug. 20,
1882. Estill Post II, G. A. r., Depart
ment of Illinois, removed DR.. Stephen
sons remains to Petersburg, ILL.,, and
reinterred them among the soldiers OF
Rose Hill cemetery with impressive
ceremonies, thus rescuing him from
the oblivion of an unmarked grave.
Judge James A. Matheny, OF Spring
field. in delivering the eulogy at the
crave, alluded to DR.. Stephenson's au-
thorship of the Grand Army OF the Re-
| public in the following eloquent Ian
F., euage: