The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1905-07-02
HE NEEDED THE BUSINESS.
Ten Strike Made the First Day by the
New General Passenger Agent.
Chicago Record-HeraldD

tCnlCdSO ReCOfu-f1eTdld-)
The primer of How to Become a
Railroad General Passenger Agent
contains the following recipe: Begin
at the very bottom and work up. There
is no other way
Such had been the infaIlible rule until
J. p. Elmer jumped into the saddle Of
the Great Westerns passenger depart
ment, taking the daring leap at a single
bound. The railroad world was amazed,
but ]. p pursued the even tenor of his
ways and within twelNemOnth he was
able to take his seat around the long
mahogany table in the meeting room
of the Western Passenger association.
EImer's appointment came about
when as commodore he was sailing a
boat on White Bear lake during a
famous regatta. Mr.. Stickney liked
the way he beat out the other fellows
after the race seemed hOpeIessly lost
After J. 2. came in victor and was
cOntentedly sucking his TedOlent briar
in front of his tent the president ap-
preached him and abruptly said
J. p. the Great Western needs a gen
eral passenger agent How would the
job suit your"
What is a G. P. A and what is he
supposed TO do as an excuse for draw
ing his salary asked J. p, undis-
turbed.
There isn't much excuse for drawing
the salary" replied the president
Paying it has become a habit with
railroads incidentally. there is a tradi-
ton that he is presumed to get bust
it's i0' MS '''''DA''S 10 you -'''o'
Elmer thought for moment and re-
piled: 1T sounds good TO me, all but
the business part l can do the rest
all right
You will learn the business quickly
enough declared the president So it
happened that J. P walked into the
general offices a few days later pre-
pared to do or expire Sriding into the
center of the room he gave his voice
full play and demanded; Where is
the general passenger agents desk?
The general passenger agent is not
in at present" replied the chief clerk.
who had not heard of the change in
officials
ooh. he isn't. Well, you have got
another guess. hun. Order that old
pine desk thrown out of here and get
me one of those new-fangled ma
hOgany affairs and a long mahogany
/ table to go with it L guess that viii
/ be a good starter he concluded. to
ward a C. 2. AS spending money for
! things he does not need"
In telling the story recently at a din
ner party Mr.. Elmer declared that
/ awful front he knew he would have to
make a cOnfidant Of some one. He
/ selected Frank Malone as the most con-
| f1ding looking member of his staff
/ Sending for him, he carefully locked
I the door of his private Office and said:
Malone on the q. [. what does @.
P. A. do?''
Everybody. and also gets business
/ If he can"
But how does he get it? Just go
! out and gather it in any old way2'
THAT would be a good way, l think.
| Elmer thought it over and determined
| to get some business at once. Hasten
| ing to the busiest portion of St Paul.
/ he walked up and down, looking Tor
/ victims. Presently three of his close
/ friends sauntered along, and Elmer
| rushed up to them. and, grasping one
4 of them by the lapel of the coat, ex-
/ claimed:
t hear you are going to Chicago" 2
! We're not going TO Chicago de-
/ clared one of them.
! Well that's too bad. Don't you think
| you ought to go to Chicago
| What for?" they demanded in a
| chorus
"Oh. you know travelling broadens
! the mind. It's a liberal education"
But we have no need of either
Don't you think you would go to
I Chicago if you could go cheaper than
J YOU could stay at hOme2 You fellows
] look as though you were all in You're
! working too hard. Take a day off, do
! and go to Chicago over the Great
| Western It's bully fun and it's cheaI
| just now
How cheap asked one of them
Elmer made rapid mental calcula-
| ton and replied: Say so round trip
! less than half fare"
/ Wen GO they declared
Bully. How many of your friends
| did you say. were going?"
! None
THAT'S too bad. Don't you think
! they ought to go to Chicago It's st
jolly in Chicago Round them UP and
| take 'em all along need the business
You know that's what a c. P As for
) any way?
| Three Pullmans loaded with St
| PauTs most respected citizens. left or
| the limited for Chicago next evening
| There was a cry of cut rates and ar
] investigation followed. To every ones
/ amazement unquestiOnable proof wa
! presented that every one of the eighty
/ tickets had been sold at tariff. which
was then SIS. 1t was a ten-strike for 9
| reputation and il won hands down. The
! day following the investigation Elmer
/ summoned Malone into his private of
/ flee.
If you ever tell where that extra
| 500 came FROM" he said. severely. I'll
drown you in White Bear lake"
/ AYE, aye, sir" replied Malone.
Reflections of Bachelor.