Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1905-11-28

Republican party. The seventh con-
testant is Hon. G. p. Iaukea of Ha-
wall, home rule candidate, who is con
testing the seat of Hon. Jonah Ka-
lauianaole, alias Prince Cupid, Repub-
lican statesman. It's a ten to one shot
that because he is Republican he of
the unpronounceable name will hold his
place. OF all the CHASTITY farces known
among men a congressional contested
election case heads the list and takes
the cake-in fact, the whole bakery.
It's really great pity that such cases
cannot be referred to some sort of
court for decision, where some atten-
ton would be paid to the facts and
where politics would not be the con-
trolling factor.
at Rejoiceth."
The st. Louis Republic lifts up its
voice in rejoicing. It's an old saying
that chickens come home to roost. Last
fall McCutcheon's cartoon, "The Mys-
FERROUS Stranger"-Republican Nilsson
ri, God save the mark-had great run.
Now the Republic gloating over Demo
cratic victories answers that year old
cartoon with this jubilant editorial:
The Democratic party-and particularly
the Democracy of our own glorious COM
monwealth-takes pleasure in welcoming
the mysterious stranger, Ohio. and hopes
that it has returned to the fold this time
to stay.
1t has been a long time since its true
sister states had an opportunity of en-
bracing the errant one, which fact even
adds to the warmth Of their greeting.
The mysterious stranger-strange only be-
cause of its long absence and mysterious
because we never could comprehend why
such an intelligent member should stray
out Of such a superior family-is doubtless
a little surprised and abashed in the pres
ence Of the staid members, but the latter
are truly delighted and altogether for
giving.
Ohios example in coming back where it
belongs makes the Missouri colonel. who
last year inadvertently went over to visit
the enemy's camp, only the more anxious
to get home. What splendid family re-
union there will be when he returns.
which he promises to do at the very first
opportunity!
Ohio indeed impresses the 10000 Mis-
souri, Democrats who went fishing year
ago.
Hon. Willard Duncan Vandiver, for
eight years representative in con-
gress, now insurance commissioner Of
Missouri, always did have plenty Of
| backbone. He has shut the New York
Life out of Missouri. Bully for Van!
When Nevada shut a life company out
the president thereof simply made fun
of his performance, but Missouri, with
/ 3,500,O00 people and $4,000,000,000 Of
wealth, is different proposition. The
New York Life fought tooth and nail
to stay in, but Vandiver would not
4 permit it, and he did right.
The Missouri Republicans gave Major
] William Warner great banquet at
Kansas City on the eve of his depar-
ture for Washington. Oratory was on
tap, but no orator possessed the can
dor to tell the truth by saying, major
Warner, never forget that you are an
accidental United States senator, the
last as well as the first Of your line.''
That would have been hitting the bulls
eye. Major Warner Is an amiable
man. All true Missourians wish him a
pleasant service in the senate of pre-
cisely six years and no more. If 10000
Democrats had not stayed at home by
reason Of Judge Parker's gold tele-
gram, the major would have stayed on
the banks Of the Kaw instead of so
journing for six years on the banks of
the Potomac.
Bad news, but not unexpected by
sensible folk, comes from Santo Do.
mingo, whose financial affairs are now
being managed without authority OF
law by President Roosevelt's under
strappers. The hot blooded denizens
Of that God forsaken republic O. are
organizing another revolution. Conse.
quently the Washington government
has dispatched warship to hold the
belligerent Dominicans in order. II our
warship takes part in a civil war over
there, 1t Is practical declaration or wal
in favor Of one faction or the other-an
act vested In the congress and not ir
! the president. What a pity that every
body can't learn to attend to his OWE
businessl
The Globe Democrat cackles over the
fact that Draper Rep.) defeated Whit
ney Dem.) for lieutenant governor Of
Massachusetts as loudly as the Mis-
souri, hen which recently laid an egg
with five yolks. Truly the CD. Il
thankful for small favors in these days
of Democratic victories. On the face
of the returns Diapers plurality Is
only 1896 Roosevelt carried the state
last year by more than 100000.
IN H.