The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-03-22

@A-A-- -e---A-e
Cucumber company, capital IS, 600, 600.
We propose to lease 100000 acres of
the Great Sahara Desert and raise 49,
100000 bushels OF our seedless cucuIn-
bers every year. AS the name implies,
it is a cucumber without a seed. and
the rind is so thin that it need not be
thrown away. No seeds to get between
your teeth-no rind to feed the pigs on,
and the taste is that of the peach.
THE action of the sand keeps every
cucumber FURNISHED up to the highest
state, and cuts it off the vine when old
enough for shipment. In six months
We shall drive every banana out Of the
market. In six more the watermelon
will be thing Of the past.
1.-THE secretaryship is a mere sine
cure. You can run it from any noun
tain or SeaShore resort and be engaged
to half a dozen fellows at the same
time, and the salary is $4,000 per year.
My dear Miss Perkins"
Don't dear me, sir, for won't have
it! I am here for my money. You owe
me seven dollars. and I must have it
before I leave this ROOM"
And you refuse the secretaryship Of
The Universal Seedless Cucumber COM
pany?"
4 absolutely refuse it, sir"
ut cannot be. You don't exactly UNI
derstand. We have already leased our
land and have got men at work
Major CrofoOt, you are simply wasting
your breath in talking soft solder to
me-
'.Refuse a place at $4,000 per year,
unused the major, as he walked around
with his hands behind him. 1T may
be that you have an antipathy against
the cucumber. I have known several
people who had. Very we'll If that
is the case let me call your attentlon
to another enterprise just ready to
spring on the public. 1t is called The
Great American Chicken Liver company
with capital at $4OOO,OO0.
when you order d dish of chicken
livers today, no matter how tony the
notef or restaurant, what do you getf
Possibly one liver. The rest of the dish
is made up of chunks of beef and NUT
ton and the tail feathers of old hens
We propose to raise our own chickens,
to begin with. Every chicken Will be
! confined to one liver, and that liver VIII
be marked for identification and sworn
| to when taken from the chicken. Tney
will be canned UP, sealed, labelled ana
| sold for just what they are-the only
genuine in market.
/ Major Crofoot, want my money
nut in Miss Perkins as he paused Tor
v Each s-ISsle; can will sell at so cents. and
| the sales will amount to 5,OOOOO0 cans
a year The dividends on the STOCK can.
/ not be less than 40, and may go to %
/ ner cent a year. The vice presidency IS
! omen to you at salary Of S2O,OOO per
annuna You need know nothing What-
| ever about chicken livers, and you can
/ spend most Of your time in Europe hoD-
nobbing with queens and Processes MY
/ dear Miss Perkins .-.,
ss,r5at viii do. siri" she interrupted.
! Won may talk your nonsense Tor =
week but it will not change my mint
nv opinion of you is that you are =
dead beat, and I shan't move until ID
MY dear Miss Perkins
..Tben I see that nothing remains but
tn nav YOU and lei you 60 would
have had it otherwise. When W
| down in the world you trusted me. 1ou
| even extended a helping hand. II va
| bread cast upon the waters anu !
,,,es1t If to come back to you hve-Ioid-
however. as you are sarcastic ana uls-
| fT,,stf,,l it only remains for me 70 stsP
into The artists studio and borrow Ahe
| money and hand it over to- you.
@And you'd better step hVely SI FL,
,,,-fioned as he passed out into the nall
60 AID not see the major again. For
| ave long hours she watched ana WalLeu l
and walked up and down, but ne came
when the shades Of evening pc
can to fall she gave it up. she tlppeSs
/ bis desk over piled the chairs on top - -
| - and then lifted his PAPER mache saLs ST.
! - -, Ton of all and went away with tears
| ~ her ewes and her fists doubled up
| 1~opyrfglnt, 1905, by I. Z. McSiuie''
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