The semi-weekly messenger. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1897-1908, 1905-03-17

Il 60 1 49, ~ As6&&% N1&La A11A1
to take care of a sick child. and yet
! In by day continue to do all her
household duties as well: and IL the
family means are scarlr she must usu-
ally enjoy even her rare holidays TAX
ing her whole brood Of children with
her. The birth pangs max all men the
debtors of all women Above all our
sympathy and regard are due TO the
struggling wives among those whom
Abraham Lincoln called the plain people
and whom he 50 loved and trusted,
for THE res of these women are often
led on the lonely heights of quiet, self
PRIMARY DUTIES OF AVERAGE
CITIZENS.
sacrificing heroism.
Just as the happiest and most honor
able and most useful task that can be
set any man is to earn enough fer the
support OF his wife and family, for the
bringing up and starting in life Of his
children, SO the most important, the
most honorable and desirable task
which a be set any woman is to be
a good and wise mother in a home
marked by ~seIf-respect and mutual for
bearance, by willingness to perform
duty, and by refusal TO sir into self
indulgence or avoid tina which entails
effort and self-sacrifice. OF course there
are exceptional men and exceptional
women who can do and ought to do
much more han this, vino can lead and
ought TO lead great careers of outside
usefulness in addition to-not as sub
stftuteS for-their home work; but I
am not speaking of exceptions; [ am
speaking of the primary duties, | am
speaking Of the average citizens, the
average men and women who make up
the Nation.
Inasmucn as l am speaking to an as
semblage of mothers / shall AVE moth
ing whatever to say in praise Of an
easy life. Yours is the work which is
never ended. No mother has an easy
time, and most mothers have very hard
times; and yet what true mother would
barter her experience of joy and sor-
row in exchange for a life of cold sell
~fishness, which insists upon perpetual
amusement and the avoidance Of care,
and which often finds its fit dwelling
place in some fat, designed to furnish
With the least possible expenditure OF
effort the maximum of comfort and of
luxury, but in whidh there is literally
NO place for children?
RESPECT FOR THE WOMAN.
The woman who is a good wife, a
good mother, lis entitled to our respect
as lis no one else; but she is entitled to
lit only because, and so long as, she is
worthy of lit. Effort and self-sacriice
are the law of worthy life for the mar
as for the woman; though neither the
effort MOI the s~elf-sacrifice may be
the same for the one as for the other.
I do not in the least believe in the pa
tient Griselda type of woman, in the
woman who submits to gross and long
continued i'll treatment, any more h
I believe in a man who tamely submits
to wrongful aggression. No wrong
doing is so abthCuTeHlt as WrOngGing by
q man towards the wife and the chill
dren who should arouse every tender
feeling in his nature. ~S9lflshneSS to-
wards Ithem, lack of tenderness towards
them, lack of consideration for them,
above all, brutality in any form towards
them, should arouse the heartiest scorn
and Indignation in every upright Q
MARRIAGE IS A PARTNERSHIP.
I believe in the woman's keeping her
Self-respeGt just as I believe in the
mans doing SO. I believe i'm her rights
JuSL aus IluCl DIS l dDeIIeNc III Tile 1IldIi .,
and indeed a little more; and I regard
marriage as a partnership, in which
zach partner Is in honor bound to think
of the rights of the other as we'll as
of his or her OWN. Butt I think that the
duties are even more important h
the rights; and in the long rum I think
that the reWard is ampler and greater
for duty we'll done, for 'the insis-
.JA ~~- x-
though this, too, must often be. Your
duty is hard, your responsibility great;
but greatest of all is your reward. [
&c not pity o in the least. On the
contrary, I feel respect and admiration
for you.
Into the womanls keeping is commit
ted the destiny of the generations TO
come after us. In bringing up our
children you mothers must remember
that while it is essential to be loving
and tender it is no less essential to be
wise and firm. Foolishness and affec-
ition must not be treated as inter-
C~hangeable terms: and besides training
you sons and daughters in the softer
and nlilder virtues you must seek to
give them Those stern and hardy quail
ties which in after life they will surely
need Some children will go wrong in
spite of the est training; and some will
go right even when their surroundings
are most unfortunate; nevertheless IN
immense amount depends upon the
family training. If you mothers
Through weakness bring up your sons
to be selfish and to Ihink only Of them
selves, you will be responsible for much
adnes among the women who are to
be their wives in the future. If you
let your daughters grow up idle, per-
haps under the mistaken impression
that as You. yourselves have had to
work hard they shall know only en-
joyment, You are preparing them to be
useless to others and burdens to them
selves. Teach boys and girls alike that
they are not to look forward to lives
spent in avoiding difficulties but to
lives spent in overcoming difficulties.
Teach them that work, for themselves