Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1905-04-01


the District property clerk. was wreathed
In smiles the other morning as he peruseo
a letter which he had received from a man
ufacturer of rubber caps worn by the Dis
trict fremen while on duty. The major y
correspondent was r. s. Cover, whose
place of business is in small city in In
diana. The District had purchased some of
the wares of Mr.. Cover, who in signing
the voucher for his pay wrote RI ). Cover.
per X s. c."
The per r. S. c." caused the property
clerk to look twice at the voucher. and
after the second look he dictated letter
to Mr.. Cover. asking him If r. s. Cover
was firm or if ''R. S. c." had been duly
authorized 10 sign the voucher. The reply
to this request for official information.
which caused Major Simms to smile, was
as follows:
Il am R. S. Cover himself. and 1 am
the whole thing. L am not hrm, ana L
have signed the voucher myself in my per-
sonal capacity without any assistance from
anybody and without delegating to any one
else the prerogatIve of writing my own
name. given to me by fond parents If you
desire any further identification l will send
you my family tree, together with a fire
proof photograph of myself, which you can
attach to my signature and preserve for
reference.
Pray feel no hesitancy in calling on me
for any minute details that will facilitate
the transaction of official business and that
Will comply WIN ali the tape lndt may
be lying around loose.
The explanation evidently sufficient,
and the voucher has been passed.
x X = 4
One of the queerest application for pen
sion ever received by the government ac-
cording TO pension attorney of long stand
ing. was that made by a Massachusetts
man who smelled gunpowder and burned
some also in the sixties. In making the
application he wrote this startling state
ment:
Il claim a pension for disabilities result
ing from being wounded in the abdomen
by twenty-four-pcunder cannon ball at
Gettysburg.
The attorney filled with wonderment
that 1t was possible for any man to re-
ceive such wound. and from such pom
derous projectile, and still live. wrote to his
client for particulars. In reply the Massa-
ohusetts man stated that he was on duty
away in rear of the firing line at the time
lie was hit and he added the cannon ball
had spent its force in demolishing a govern
ment mule and came bounding along ike
a base BALI until it hit him and keeled
him over.
But" he added facetiously. 1.-The blow al
most killed father and resulted in a gen.
eral breaking up of my nervous system,
and for that l claim pension"
He got 1t.
x \ x *s*
certain widow who lives in New York
state is very DESTROYS of having her con-
gresham use his influence in securing a
pension for her She has been Fostering
him with letters for a long while and as
time advances and the money does not
come she grows more and more impatient
The member is no longer in the city. but
his private secretary received letter
from this constituent several days ago
again calling attention to the fact that she
wants recognition. At the end of the let
ter there was this indignant paragraph:
II want you to know that my husband
died of regular, old-fashionel consumption,
contracted in the service There is some
body writing to the pension office trying
to keep me from getting the pension, who
says John died of tuberculosis"
x X =
Some people have peculiar conception of
members of Congress and their duties in
this city This was illustrated in cross
roads grocery store in Washington county,
Md, recently while a bunch of village
quid nuncs were seated about the establish
ment on soap boxes, flour barrels and
other things. engaged in settling the Rus
so-Japanese war, arranging the preliminary
details for the next presidential election
and mapping out a policy for President
Roosevelt and the next Congress.
A Washington woman who was in the
store at the time happened to overhear
this part of the conversation:
Il tells yer, Obadiah, them congressman
Is all thieves. But down in Washington
they don't call 1t thievin when a congress-
man helps hisself to the peoples money.
That's what they calls appropriately"
Yes" interjected a tall farmer with a
wisp of whiskers on his chin, every one
of them congressman has a key to the
treas'ry, and when they wants any money
they just unlockS the vaults and helps
themselves. That's why they so anx-
ious to be sent to Washington. 1t faint
the salary as catches EN-; it's the vaults
full"
Yep" chimed in a short agriculturist
who was putting away at a corncob pipe.
Fan | hearn 1t sed de keys to de vaults
IS made of eighteen-carrot gold"
x X
Speaker Cannon recently referred to the
fact that northern Illinois was settled prin-
cipally by French-Canadians. These early
settlers and their descendants down to the
present day, said Mr.. Cannon, have con-
sistently voted the republican ticket. The
last time he was in that part of the state
he questioned one Of the priests the sub
ject. He told me-" said the Speaker, that
the reason why the Frenchmen were gen.
orally republicans in politics was very sim
pie. 1t was somthing like this. The Irish
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