Morris tribune., 1905-09-16
ANDREW CARNEGIE MAY FOR
GET US WITH HIS HERO
MEDALS, SAYS
WILLIAM ALLEN WHITE
SUPPOSE ROOSEVELT RUN THE
OYSTER BAY
TRIBUNE


Kansas before the National Editor
lal Association at Guthrie, Okls., last
June and while it is especially in
teresting to the newspaper fraternity
everybody else will enjoy reading it
1t provoked roars of laughter at the
Guthrie convention and you will, nc
doubt, smile yourself while reading
it. MIR. White sprang into fame in
1896 when he wrote the famous
political article, whats the
Matter With Kansas" Since then
ne has contributed several magazine
article of note.
This is the day of reform. Every
body is engaged in reforming some
one else. The preachers are re-
forming the newspapers, the news
papers are reforming the politicians,
the politicians are reforming the
railroads, the railroads are reforming
the tariff magnates, the tariff mag
mates are reforming Standard Oil,
and Standard Oil is reforming the
preachers--so the happy circle is
completed, and when the bulldog of
of reform finally does catch his tail
and swallows it and turn himself
inside out, we shall have a fine
country. Generally speaking most
reformers are carrying their reform
as side line. They make travelling
expenses on it. It doesn't cost the
preachers anything to reform news
papers, In fact the preachers get a
good deal of top of column next to
reading matter space out of it that
they would hardly get if they de
voted themselves to the perseverance
of the saints, and higher criticism.
1t does not cost the politicians
anything to reform the railroads.
not that any one knows of. The
politicians keep right on riding on
transportation, from the law depart
ment of the railroads, while whoop-
ing it up for railroad reform, and it
doesn't cost the railroad presidents
anything to be for tariff reform, and
what's more. it doesn't seem 10 hurt
the tariff. If the railroad magnates
we're as serious about tariff reform
es they are to see the trusts get their
rebates, there would be some tariff
reform. And the benefciarles of the
tariff aren't losing much by reform
ing the Standard Oil. Any one can
reform Standard Oil tt is the
punching bag in the national re-
formatory that we all try our muscle
on. Standard Oil and its associates
form whole carnival of pleasure
one round of Joy for the reformers.
In one booth are the Rockefellers
and Henry Rogers, and their friends,
and it costs nothing to throw at
these babies and every time you hit
baby in the Standard Oil booth you
get a fine cigar; two babies two
cigars; and three babies a suhscrip-
ton to Everybody's Magazine.
The only place N this bright and
more or less beautiful world, where
reform takes the hair and the hide,
and the tall thereunto appertaining,
is in newspaper office. 1t costs a
newspaper to go into the reform
business. If you tackle the beef
trust, brother editors you will hear
from it when you make a contract
for Vigoral and the beef extracts. If
you tackle the railroads you will get
a chance to see more scenery to the
square mile when you travel than
YOU have been used to observing
If you tackle the politicians they
will start another paper which won't
hurt you particularly except as it is
disgrace to the honorable profess
ion in which you are shining. If
you whack away at Standard Oil
there is danger of losing your Mica
Axle Grease and paratine candles
advertising, and if you are for Sun,
day closing you lose your tobacco
and cigar and malt MURINE adver-
Using. Yet you must reform some
thing. The people demand reform,
and if they don't get it they will
stop the paper After a long session
OF meditation and prayer the Gazette
has come to the conclusion that the
only safe thing to reform is the
CAST0RIA.