davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16
The Illy.r IxonEu.

Tropical rivers vary greatly in vol
umc In the rainy season sweeping To
the sea IN vast torrcntial floods and
near the end Of the dry season flowing
slowly and only in the central and
deeper portions Of their beds. The
Kongo, however, the largest river In
Africa, rises and falls very slightly,
and Commander Cameron accounts for
this popularity. which was at one time
considered lnexpllcable, by the obscrva-
ton that the basin of this great river
extends on both sides of the equator,
and therefore one moicty of its trlbu-
tarIes are In food while the other arc
at their minimum volume,
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16
Shnrf ON Wnr,ls

Bishop Thlrlwall, an English pref
ate, had the greatest possible aver
sion TO answering questions. one day
n tailor said To him when he had been
summoned to take the bishops meas
urements, "What are your lordship's
ordcrsY 81 want n suit of clothes"
"IIcre Is n very nice cloth, my lord"
"Ah" "And this Is likewise n very
good one" YES" Here Is another
Of excellent quality" Very" which
material will your lordshIp decide
upon?" II want suit Of clothes"
And that was all the answer the tailor
could get When the new gardener
acc0sted him as he was walking, book
In hand, in the garden To ask, How
will your lordship have this border
laid outi" there was no answer. How
VIII your lordship be pleased to have
this border laid OUT" was the next
attempt. still there was 10 reply, but
when the question was repeated for
the third time the answer came, You
are the gardener, believe. and | am
the bishop"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16
CHINESE MONEY.
some Is Good and Some lis Counter
felt, but II All Goes.

Emile Bard Frenchmau. has an
interesting chapter on the money of
Chinu IN his book. chinese Life In
Town and Country" He explains that
the unit of Chinese money Is the tael
which Is not Il coin. hut n weight of
silNer-the ounce, of which there are
sixteen TO the catty and 1900 to the
picu. The commercial tael is that of
Canton, which should weigh H,IS3
grains, but usually weighs 37.3S. Then
there Is the tael of Shanghai, which
weighs 1876, and the revenue tael used
In valuinE imports ind exports, and
each large city has its OWN, that of
Tientsln worth from 1 To Il per cent
more thnn that of Shanghai. business
estimated III tacls Is carried on 10y the
use of Spanish dollars or silver ingots.
The former are weighed and stamped
by every south China merchant and
have to be remltted continually. The
ingots of silver are cut from bars into
pieces that the operator estimates VIII
weigh 30 tacls. Naturally each one
who handles them weighs them.
Banks store their money In cellars,
In boxes carried back and forth by
coolies" says NJ. Bard This explains
the Item of transportation which Is de
Quoted from the fnrc of Il Chinese
check when II Is eashed Mt bank.
One can judge of the complications
consequent upon this system of con
version of taels of different values Into
lngots of different weight and purity,
especially us assayers of different 10
calitics refuse to honor the stamps of
other cities" In places where the dol
lar is not used small payments are
made by cutting up an ingot. THE
scale used In weighing these fragments
has two sets of markings; one for re
celpts and one for payments"
Chlnas national coin Is the cash.
round copper coin with n square hole
through II. The cnsh or sapak dates
from ut least 1900 Il. c. Eight pounds
weight of cash makes IL dollar. Years
ago an emperor decided To double his
funds by giving copper cash double Its
value In certain parts of the country
this performance Is still In effect. In
other parts II or 81 cash are counted
rs 100.
In Honan the Chinese 90 to market
With two kinds of money. one real, the
other counterfeit Some articles are
bought with one, some with the other
Certain articles have two prices one
In good money one In bad.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16
AMERICAN LANDSCAPE.
How IL Differs From That of Eng
land aud the Continent.

How ID Differs From Tint of Eng
land aud the Continent.
The American landscape, even in the
older pnrts of the country, Is generally
unkempt and does not lend itself as
readily to formal treatment as does the
typical English or continental land.
scnpe. The owners of big estates rare
ly appreciate the scale ON which the
landscape architecture should be laid
out and the patience which Is ncccs-
sary to obtain complete and consum-
mate effect, They want ready made
estates. Finally, the leading American
house architects have, with few eX-
ceptions, good deal to learn about
the technique of landscape design. So
fur as the large house Itself Is con
cerned, II convention has been estabs
lished which Is In the main II good
convention but the designing Of gar
dens Is still In an early experimental
stage The stage properties are col
lectcd In abundance. There II no lack
of pergolas, fountains well heads, ga
zebos, statuary and pottery, but hS Ike
ns not they are indiscriminatoly plnced.
The architectural features are, how
ever. generally somewhat better man
aged thnn the planting. which fire.
quently looks as If nn Irish gardener
had been given some vague general dl'
rections, or as II the lady of the house
Ind considered TINT II was womnn's
business to make the garden green.
As II matter OF fact, however, the lady
of the house, in ease she has her own
way, generally paints the garden vel
low and red rather than green. Her
Iden usually Is merely to get rs much
bloom M possible. and this she does ut
n sacrifice of those masses of foiluge
which ARE absolutely necessary to give
mass, body and depth TO II large gar
den. Architectural Record Magazine.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16

When Thackeray was candidate
for parliament from the city Of oxford
some one remarked to him that he
must be well known to most of those
whose votes he sought "Now," said
Thaekeray, laying down his knife and
fork and holding up a finger, there
was only one man among all that l
went TO see who had heard my name
before, and he was circulating IL
brarian. Such is mortal fame" That
was In 1857 and Vanity Fair" had
been published ten years.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16
A CrIiielsnn by List.

A story of List rccItcs that on Il
certain occasion n Miss NJ was play
Ing II sonata by Sterndale Bennett, II
work Of very prosy type and GER
talnly lncklng in anything like spon-
tancity or poetry. List was evident
~ not familiar with 1t, 10, inter play
Ing some SIX or seven pages, he gently
tapped Miss NJ. ON the arm and said,
"Madcmoisclle, would you kindly name
the piece YOU are pcrformlngY Ger
talnly, sir, she replied at is the
sonata The Maid Of Orleans by VIII
liam Stcrndale Bennett" Him." said
List. It's II pity the original manu-
script didn't meet the same fate as the
maid"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16
sn,nItcst nIr,I.

The golden crested wren IS the small
est not only of British, but Of all Euro
penn, birds. Its average weight IL
only about eighty grains troy, 50 that
II would take scventy-t two Of the birds
to weigh n pound. The length Of the
feathers IL about three and half
inches and the stretch of the wings
about five inches, but when the fenth-
ers are taken off the length Of the body
does not exceed one inch
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16

Lord Seton, the renowned gourmet,
was once interroEated as to the bGIt
mode of eating Strawberries and re-
piled: Sprinkle them slightly with
powdered white sugar candy and few
drops of Malmsey. Take them after
breakfast or for supper or after dinner
after plain biscuit Ice" When once
well known diplomatlst attended his
first garden party after arriving In
London he was shown IL dish of straw
berries and cream. "Pourquoi fairep
cried he. explaining that he could not
bring himself to fancy that the mess
was intended for the food of men,
London Truth.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16
Bank of ireland Guard.

The Bank of Ireland, like the Bank
Of England, has II military guard,
which Is relieved every twcnty-four
hours. Immediately after the mount
Ing Of the new guard every morning n
announces the arrival Of the head por-
ter with IL large book. in which the of
iicer signs his namc, rank and regl-
mcnt, and on the departure Of the por-
ter with the book II half sovereign Is
found ON the table. II is the officers
perduislte.
Pcdantry and taste are as ineonsist-
ent rs gayety and melancholy. Lava
ter
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16
81 In SirnIrIht.

Your backbone was not made for II
barrel hoop, SO do not curve 1t around,
but rather straightcn 1t out. God made
man upright not round shouldcred,
humpbackcd or bending over.
If you bend over tcJ much In your
legs off from an old chair, and then
sit down so low that your chin Will
come just above the table. Make the
hind legs little shorter than the fore
legs, and then read and write with
your arms on the table, and 1t Will
take out some of the crook from your
back.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16
A Great I,ien.

Did you eve notice that most Of the
sudden and disastrous fires are due to
spontaneous combustionT'
mo, but Pve often thought spon
tane0us combustion would be a SPLEEN
did thing 10 keep on tap for lighting
the kitchen fire"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16
The Soda Thirst

II has come and we were never
better able to entertain it.
The delicious new drinks we
have will charm and delight
this great summer autocrat.
He will be repeatedly downed,
but like truth will rise again.
Our fresh, pure all fruit .
syrup and our sparkling cool
soda water are fit to quench
the thirst OF a monarch.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16

THAT brother Of yours, Lucy" said
the man OF the house. Seems to be
pretty tough character"
deed he IL. suh." replied the col
ored maid. 'IIe jess natchelly seems
to be de white sheep oh our family,
sho' huff Philadelphia Press.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16

'Do you know that the coin you lent
me was II counterfcIt?' said the habltu-
al borrower,
ooh, sure do You said that you
needed 1t bad"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16

Timkins So that mining Enterprise
Of yours proved a failure. ell: Simkins
Yes; a total failure. Tin. rs But
thought yoi said there was fortune
In It, Slmklns Well, mines In it.-Chi-
cage News.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16
REAL ESTATE FOR SALE.

Two Large Manufacturing Plants with power;
Eleven-room House corner Jefferson and
Clinton streets.
Seven-room Heuse corner Delevan and
George streets
Seven-room House, on Delevan street, be-
tween George and Union streets.
Three seven-room Houses on Elm street.
Eighf-room House, cottonwood street.
Eight-room House, Clinton street.
Two new Houses, Delaware avenue. All i'm
improvements
Seven-room House, York street.
Seven-room houss, Lambert street.
Six-room House Union street below Ferry,
Large Double Brick House, Coryell street,
Several desirable farms for sale near Lam
bertyille containing from 30 to 100 acres.
Three lots near Iambertville.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16
MONEY WANTED.

5000, 81 800, 81 800, 81 800, 500, 800 all frs
mortgages on city property and desirable in
yestmeRts.
Money to loan in large amounts ON i'm
proved Real Estate.
Office open evenings to 8 oclock
Lock Box 1874, o L. BLACKWELL
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16

Labor is the inevitable lot OF the
majority, and the best education is
that which VIII make their labor most
productive Proude
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16

Mrs. PATTERSON. What! You've had
fourteen co0as In three m0nthsf Mrs
Catterson Yes. and didn't please
any of them.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16

Partial Contents for this Month
Course in English for the Beginner.
Course in English for the Advanced
Pupil.
How to Increase Ones Vocabulary.
The Art of Conversation.
Should and Would: How to use Them.
Pronunciations Century Dictionary.
Correct English III the Home.
Correct English in the School
What to Say and What Not 10 Say.
Course III Lottery Writing and Punctu-
alton.
Alphabetc list of Authorizations.
Business English for the Business Man.
Compound Words; How to Write
Them.
Studies in English Literature.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16

Good humor and generosity carry
rhe day with the popular he t all the
world over.-Alexander gm' a.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16
NOTICE.

ESTATE OF ELIZABETH r IIusEToN, deceased,
Notice is hereby given thnt an order, dated
the ninth day of MAY A. u, one thousand nine
hundred aud five, has been made by the Sur
roRate of the County of Mercer, upon the APP
phcatinn of the subscriber, administrator of
Elizabeth X iiuAeton, late Of the County Of
Mercer, deceased, directing the creditors of
said decedent Ia bring in their debts, de
mands and claims against the estate of said
deCedent, under oath or affirmation, to the
subscriber, within nine months from the date
of said order or they will he forever barred
from any action therefor against the said
administrator.
ALBERT b ANDERSON,
Administrator,
Iambertyilie, n j.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16

Ninety people go out to join the
wild hunt for happiness. and the hun
dredth man stays comfortably ut homo
and wins II
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16

A person suffering from chronic rheu-
matlsm should avoid dried fish. cooked
oysters, pork, veal and turkey.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1905-08-16

The Use of PrcscrNHtiVcs with Fresh
Ment-CoIorinE Matter In Many snu-
sngcs-How 10 Detect Boric Acid In
Meat Products.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1905-12-22
ELECTROMAGNETIC.

zoos st. NV. Course of Readings In French
Madam N. de Bausset. Glasses In German, French,
Dressmaking, Millinery, Teaching Of English.
Shakespeare, Elocution. Grammar Arithmetic
Gymnastics and Dancing. Terms: S1O0 a month
each class to members; membership 81 90 year.
no12-eod MISS MCDONALD Supt
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1905-12-22
THE BOHEMIAN.
Showing That It Is Only an Excuse for
Oddly.

From Smart Set
Once upon a time there lived an artist. He
had lofty ideals in his brain and yellow
stains on his fingernails. Besides he lived
on his relations. He went through three
universities, and thence post-graduated to
Paris, whittier he Travelled to absorb some
atmosphere.
He returned finished artist He must
have been good, for when he entered a mu-
scum he could tell at glance where Ra-
phael fell down. how badly Velasuuez really
was, where Murillo was weak and why Ru
bens turned out so much poor stun. 1T was
he who discovered that the Brabizon schoo,
he called 1t that himself-is not what II is
said to be. and that Sir Joshua Reynolds
he hailed him as Josh-was poor on brush
work.
Meanwhile he lived In hall room and
wore moving neckties. His shoes were OF
varying patterns and his clothes were styl-
ish-in 1853. He slept most of the day and
walked around all night. When one in
CURED wherefore, he announced proudly
II am Bohemian"
He ate sausages cooked over a candle in
plug hat, and slept under the carpet near
the floor. He announced that all marriage
contracts should contain two weeks
clause, and that all property should be d.
yided among every body. He borrowed three
dollars from anybody who would lend 1t to
him; failing three, he borrowed two, or even
from a stingy friend-ten cents. He paid
no one and incurred a laundry bill. When
one would inquire wherefore he announced
proudly, II am Bohemian
One day the artist arrived
An editor saw promise in his work and
gave him three years contract at sixty
dollars per week.
The next month he married and settled
down. Before his contract expired he had
two children, a savings bank account and
three life insurance policies He goes to bed
each night at o. and his clothes are of the
latest fashion. His meals are served to the
minute and he stickles abjectly for the in
fiuence of the home.
Moral: Bohemianism is only an excuse
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1905-12-22
WATER LILIES WORTH GROWING
Cut Barrel in Half and Plant the Chi.
nese Pigmy Water LtIy.

from the Garden Magazine
pond of water lilies IS possibility for
any one who can give two square feet OF
water surface in a sunny spot.
II you do make a water garden have ic
near at hand SO you can see the flowers
when at their best, and with all hardy
water lilies We must count on enioyine
them In the morning or early afternoon.
The flowers close at specific times for each
KIND, varying from noon to or, at least 8
o'clock.
water lilies In tubs are better than Moth
ing at all A kerosene barrel sawed in half
VIII furnish two tubs, each big enough for
one plant The tubs should be well washed
out and soaked for some time IN water. N
oroer TO remove as much possible of tho
OIL and the glue which is put on to render
the vessel tight. Three or cour days to a
week will suffice for this.
II VIII be better. though not essential, to
nave the tub sunk about half its depth in
the earth. so as to keep the roots cool For
tnough the leaves and flowers love sun
shine. the black ooze in which the roots
naturally live is always cool
ELL the tub half or two-thirds with a mix
ture OF equal parts good garden soil and
Well-rotted cow manure. When setting out
the plant spread out the roots we'll and
after filling In the soil cover with an inch
OF sand FIJI up the tub with water and
our little Water-tly pond is complete. The
to replace what is lost by evaporation, 10
all the further attention that will be need
ed until winter sets In.
II old cow manure is not available use
ground bone-a small double handful Is
enough for such tub as is described. The
sand for covering Is not necessity but It
serves to keep in place the earth and
manure.
One caution-do not use mud or swamp
muck in the water garden.
IL am to choose one water lily only for
such small effort. I will take the little
Chinese pigmy water lily, Nymphaea tetra-
gona- 1t is the most satisfactory, because
II will quickly cover the water with IT'S
small horseshoe-shaped leaves. These are
dark green, with faint and picturesque
brown blotches on the upper surface, duh
red beneath. and the combination Is rich in
color Then again. II is good plant for
fowering--a good specimen Will keep up q
continuous succession of its little star-llke
flowers throughout the season. from June
to September Often two or three flowers
Will be open at once. The eight or ten
snowy pc a. surround a group of stout
golden samens. and in the center is a
broad. yellow, basln-shaped stigma. The
flower opens each day about noon ana
closes again at 8 I'm the afternoon repeat
ing this on three or four successive days.
1t exhales delicate fragrance, like that or
a tea rose.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1905-12-22
THE FUTURE MAN.
He VIII Be an Earless, Noseless, Hair.
less Creature.

From the Metropolitan Magazine.
In the prehistoric period. even. mans
mouth had ceased to be an instrument for
grasping food: 1t Is still growing less nra.
hensfble, his front teeth are smaller. h,s
IDS are thinner and less muscular: he has
q new organ, naandible not OF irreparable
tissue, but OF bono and steel-a knife and
FORK. There Is no reason why things should
stop at the partial artificial division ttns
Afforded; there is every reason, on the con-
trary, to believe my statement that Some
cunning exterior mechanism will presently
masticate and insalivate his dinner relieve
his diminishing salivary glands ana taetb
and at last altogether abolish them.
Then, what Is not needed disappears
What use Is there for external ears. nose
ana brow ridges now? The two latter once
and In falls, but In these days we keen on
our legs and are at peace. Directing his
thoughts in this way, the reader may pres
entity eon1lre up dim strange vision of
beautiful, soulful; above them, no longer
separated by rugged brow ridges, is the ton
OF the head, glistening, hairless dome.
terete ana beautiful; no craggy nose rises
10 disturb by Its unmeaning shadows the
symmetry of that calm face, no yestieiaI
ears project; the mouth Is small. perfectly
round aperture, toothless and gumless law
less, unanimal, no futile emotions dist,,rN-
moon or the evening star. In the wilde firm
ament Of the face" Such is the face the
professor beholds In the future
OF course. parallel notifications win also
affect the body and limbs Every day ~
many hours and so much energy are re-
Quired for digestion; gross torpidity, a
carna lethargy. seizes on mortal men after
dinner. This may and can be avoided.
Mans knowledge of organic chemistry
widens daily. Already he can Supplement-
the gastric glands by artificial devices.
Every doctor who administers physic i'm
plies that the bodily functions may be arti-
fciaily superseded. We have pepsine. nan
creatine artificial gastric acid-I know not
what like mixtures. Why, then, should not
the stomach be ultimately superannuated
altogether?
"A man who could not only leave his
dinner to be cooked, but also leave 1t to be
masticated and digested, would have vast
social advantages over his food-dfgesting
fellow. This is. let me remind you here,
the calmest. most passionless and scientific
working out OF the future forms OF things
from the data of the present.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1905-12-22
THE DUEL OF SEX
How One Phase Of It Serves as an
Effectual Barrier to Matrimony.

From Everybody's Magazine.
'I was brought up to regard with repug-
nance all efforts to attract or to please
mankind My native Indifference was fos-
.ercd. Girls who ran after the boys were
declared when mother and my aunts met
In sewing-room conclaye, to be the most
disgusting objects Young women who per-
mitted familiarities'-such dire licenses, I
suppose, as a romping dance, careless use
OF first names, free circulation of photo
graphs-how they were condemned held up
to seorn In our sitting-room, Not for my
mothers daughters. not for aunts' nieces,
were such ways.
Mother would have thought 1t vulgar and
iiidelicate to the last degree to train us to
look toward matrimony as goal. She
would have died of shame at the thought
of teaching us the articles of attraction.
She disdained to suggest to US IN any way
That 1t was desirable to please. think
she heartily despised those mothers who In
vited young men to their houses or made
things attractive for young men In their
houses In her heart l suppose the dear
lady was convinced that the Intrinsic worth
Of her daughters, their competiing. naturai
charms would be a resistless magnet, and
that. in due course OF time, there would
come three dukes a-riding' to bear US on
to whirl OF glory Poor mother,
tinued, novels. / think, completed for me.
In all my early faverites the heroine was
as unapproaehable as a star. her love was a
reward, EfacaOuSiy UtstUWeu upon tIt uOtr
of great deeds-not an equal force flowing
out to meet the love of a mere man. Or she
was capricious. willful. charmingly difficult.
Her Withdrawals Iured on her wooers; her
her piques and pontings were SO
many entrancements, her very refusal In
famed But in our town and our circle the
men, when one refused them. went Off and
married the girl around the corner; when
one adopted the distant attitude of the tour
naInent queen they stayed aws,y. And when
one fiouted and jeered them one was heN
to have bad manners anl . sharp tongue.