davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02
FUNNY TELEcRAPHIc MESSAGES.
" shington Newspaper Correspond
ents Receive Curious orders rom
Home Papers

Newspaper men In Washington olteh
receive very queer assignments anu
messages from the home Office. ana u
Is sometimes only after close reason
ing that they are able 10 figure out
what is wanted.
one OF these correspondents received
= message recently 70 send 900 al
ditional rats This. OF course. was
easy after he learned that an assist
ant sent in a short description about
Kidding the Capitol OF rats. Another
writer was staggered when he got
telegram from hiss mana ging editor
which read "NOur story does not agree
with our headline. Please explain.
/ Someone had probably mixed NJ the
headings.
In the latter part OF last February
/ one correspondent was telcgraphed by
/ a new editor. not familiar with Wash
/ lngton affairs. 60 get interviews with
distinguished Congressman aud send
on story giving their opinion when
I Congress would adjourn The news
paper man telegraphed back: Unless
/ Congress violates the Constitution i
I will adjourn at noon March 4.
Another member Of Newspaper Row
received from his New York paper
what Is considered the prize order: l. 3.
There's something Ira the air. send
two thousand words.
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02
Importanee ID RaiIway.

THE Pan-American railway would
not only increase the friendly relations
Of the countries Il would connect. but
Ice Of vast political and commercial
Importance 10 all the republics OF the
Western Hemisphere. IL Is contem-
plated 10y the ran-Amcrican Railway
Committee 10 bring the Importance OF
the subject OF the construction OF the
road. rs a national question. Ca the at
tcntion OF the next Congress.
IL was the expressed opinion OF
Andrew Carnegie that II the United
states gave the SlW.OOo,OOO toward
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

SO that. after all the question Is a
moral one. Unless the people OF the
country are willing TO adopt a some
what new plan 81 business. refuse
compromises and refuse % accept
Specially advantageous raneementS
for themselves. in other words. until
we get upon q higher moral plane. and
resolve. at the same time that $50 are
deIna nding that there shall W equal
fair, and just treatment Tor every
one. that We ourselves viii refuse 20
SEX OF avail ourselves - any special
rlvilege-uDless this sentiment be-
comes general throughout all the peo-
ple-fhere g. little hope ~ any real
perma nenf relief Certainly II cannot
~ accomplished by legislation and
the enactment 81 laws which an not.
ca mot. and viii not. - enforced be
cause 81 lack - public sentiment and
demand 10 require enforcement.
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02
Trouble Ahead for Tobacco Trust

4 medical journal states that new
drug. marrahuana. is the recent inven-
tion OF professor OF the University
OF Chicago. IL is said 10 be subSu-
tute for tobacco. opium, cocaine ana
hashecsh. and as deadly rs all Of them
uut together. Dispatches OF the daily
press also state that Mr.. Rockefeller
is contemplating an additional endow-
ment 90 the Chicago University OF %
million dollars. Is 90 possible that
standard oil is going Co put the To-
hacco trust ami the opium trust ana
an other like trusts entirely out OF
business
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02
Sale Iaaa.sry 10 &C. uaIted $500.

The people ~ the United States are
apparently very fond % the bitter a.
they are 81 the sweet. for during the
year 1904 they consumed 2Sllo.ssi
barrels of salt. During the same year
there Was q total Drodnrtion 81 SAT- 10
49, United States Of 2203DO2 bar
rsle sof 2s0 ponndsi having . yalu1fsoIs.
81 SGlo2f 2.s1 This production IN 1901
49, slse largest ever reported except
Ia 1852 A feature worthy 81 note
during 1904 was the Increase 10 the
f,r0sucflon Of rock salt. i.ilrstf@e bar
rels b-lng The amounf mined. The
.4eatezs SHARE OF this came from
T.oulssana. where rock salt Is easily
and ebeap;y procured from tbs
'-rnounds round III the southern part
of the State.
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

An atfack by porterS with mops was
easily beaten on. The driver blew hl-
whistle and ler III steam. huf without
effect. EveusShe tempting Sure ~ a
saucerful OF Mlk was treated Win
scorn-
Time was up and the 3-lS started
with The cat sfill iu position N hel.
ls reached Swiudon the driver ioun..
h s. H. -arue nias. covered with OIL
ana r.,.al dust i,ut stuI defiant
When rhe rralu returned 90 Padding
Ton next rnornfug fhe feline traveller
aIirhts.i. l--lracgied but triumphant
With something Ike a @wagseT ht
stalked past tiie astounded poFter- ans
collectors and disc rI--arfi iu last
bourne terrace. 90 tell q bis frlrnd'
the tale 81 his ia mile Journey
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

Cats long Rtoc AnoSr Erg'ne-
The driver OF thu 9-15 r. m mail
train from FaddiuEton to Swindon had
an unauthorized passenger on bis
engine. and believes that De VII ne
lucky Tor the resr 20 his life in cousc-
Qusucc-
Just before The train was due to pun
ont the driver went beneath hi~ en- me-
with his Oh can. suddenly che OH can
dropped from his hand. He scrambled
ont hurrie,lly aud todd his comrades
thai hc hat seen "a pair of utry eyes
-ilrin- 30 him from the darkness
IuKe>t.ca ris.n with rhe AID 90 lamp
rert-.Is-g 4 black cat. which had taken
up r.a~if.uu between tlr engine anu
tender. TIE cat was invited to come
forth. huf declined 20 move. a cleaner
scent beneath the engine aul made an
attack upon TIE position. hut the cat
l.aI rhn advantage of higher ground.
and replied with such good effect that
tle cleluer retired in coufusiou-
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

From the Chicago News.
The Tax Assessor meets q great many
men OF untold wealth.
The Income OF q married man Il any
v,bere frau . L. NJ 10 3 a. NJ.
Because e. photographers always tnAeS
negative 90 IL NOT q sign that ne VIII sly
s.nn'' when asked fo take something
n.eor,lS ar. brittle things You can
foyrcr one without breaking H.
Remember Sampson fate. young hl1n'
ANA be careful how YOU use your jaWoonr.
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02
Wins Either Way.

Uncle Ruhe-"So that patent medi-
cine feller made YOU a handsome Of
ferf"
Uncle Si-"Greatl II l git cured.
he puts my picier I'm the advertising
column: an II / don't. I'm the obituary
All have 10 10 IS 90 buy the medicine
and take It according 10 directions
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02
"aIvayS Leave Them Laughing
When You Say Goodbye"
Al Aboardi

Bill had a billboard. Bill also had
board bin. The board bill bored Bill
50 that Bill sold the billboard To pay
his board bill 80 after Bin sold his
billboard To- pay his board bin the
board bin no longer bored BIN.
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

IL Is estimated that the 10000
Americans who have visited Europe
fhis summer have sI-nt ara afeTaS'.
~ Si.0sl each. or q total 81 STOOD
oes0 This e. quite a SURF ~ money 20
take ouf az fhe country.
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

President Roosevelt transmitted 10
Congress. In which DO was shown that
from personal Investigation there was
an earnest wish on the part 90 al the
republic, Go enjoy railway connection
with their great elder brother oi the
North to whom they sell ~ per cent
mon. products than they buy from
him. AT this recent meeting IL ~
Davis. Chairman. sall-
several 90 The republics a9e now en-
raecd iu constructing railroads which
viii serve as links in the chain. while
others are making surveys which can
be used iu the further construction OF
the main lnc. BEFORE the railways
were built between the United states
ana Mexico. about - per cent only
of the Imports and exports OF Mexico
was with this country; but now -neariy
rn,. entire commerce OF Mexico Is Win
the United States. We buy from the
Central and South American republics
much more than we sell 10 them, only
about ~ per cent 90 their import trade
being with this country. steamship
lines from south America 10 Europe
now largely control this trade. When
the pau-American railway j. bullt
# however. no foreign power can ever
successfully interfere cor compete win
US DO our trade relations with tn
REPUBLICS south OF US
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

the railway. now spent yearly on the
navy. conditioned upon the SoutA
American republics plcdginS their
credit for an equal sum. we should DO
ner,. 10 eliminate the element OF dan
ger. which ut best is small. than We
shall in an the warships we can build
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

1t Is not natural for monarchies TO
love republic. We know that
coalition 81 European mOnarchies-
under the name OF the Holy Alliance.
tried to prevent the Spanish colonies
from becoming dependent. Aud we
know. TOO. that long aftcrward Efforts
were uiatla 20 restore monarchy on
this continent. Monarchial countries
want the trade 81 republican conn
igics. hat they do not want 10 encOur-
age republican institutions and Tree
government The United States wants
the trade Of the republics south OF M.
but II also wants 10 see theta continue
rs free republics. Its friendship ana
is help they can depend on FOR that
purpose.
Railroads arc pioneers and develop
The country through which they 90.
The wonderful resources 81 the United
states would not have been known had
not the railroads made their develop
menf possible. The countries 10 the
south. with their -siNo.otO Of people.
are rich IN ali that makes for material
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02
PAE-AMERICAN RAILWAY.
VIII RS THE LONGEST AND MOST
IMPORTANT RAIL WAY LINE
IN TIE WORLD.

Links Amounting to Only I.S2S Miles
are Required 20 Complete Track
Over Ten Thousand Miles Long
Between New York and Bucnos
Ayes. South America.
The British are gradually closing up
the gaps between the ends Of the rail-
way line 10 span the African Continent
from Cape Town 10 Cairo. aud the ran
way TO connect the United States with
its neighbor. the Argentine Republic.
at the lower end OF the Southern Con
tinen;. lacks but 4.s25 miles OF the
iO.471 miles between New York and
Buenos AyreS OF being completed.
Since 1870. when President Monroe de-
clar,ed IL our policy 20 cultivate friend
" relations and lend our more than
moral support 10 the South American
republics. there has been q growing
desire 10 set more In touch with the
people Of these southern lands. \
practical move In that direction was
never made until the winter OF fSSe9o.
when Secretary OF State Blaine had
representatives from seventeen rcpub-
lies in conference at Washington. The
result OF this meeting was a movement
for n survey. which showed that n
practicable route was possible at n cost
| OF less than 500. Ooo. 600. giving us
direct connection with BuenOs Ayres.
/ RI always are in existence In nearly
/ every republic south Of Us. and each
one could b. made tributary 10 this
I great inter-continental line. Mexico
/ has about 10000 miles Of track. thu
I Central American countries "A little
over .oN. and south America n little
/ more than 2S.Oo0.
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

Tho annie growers want representative
A., tha cabinet There can be no question
that apples were intended by nature To-
the Interior department.
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

Secret Service officials report that very
little counterfeit money i being made IA
me country IL Is probably more profitable
aud less dangerous TO 20 into high finance
ina New York City.
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

Rals.uu. who kidnapped Ion Perdicardis
H. m. longer "A bandit but las become
proutincnt Moroccan politician Ihus IL u
when a man hits the d""nMH'a t'a'''
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02
RsiI~ ay Connection Desired.

Yearly meetings Of the Pan-Ameri-
can Railway Commission have been
held since 1900 At the meeting in
Washington last spring. Charles NJ.
Pepper. Commissioner OF the Confer
euce. submitted report, which
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

wealth and prosperity. and their prod
ucts are wanted in the North in eN-
change for the commodities found
there.
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

Secretary Shaw says that he has made
no pians for leaving tbe Treasury ana ac-
ccpfing the presidency OF any large hnnh-
cisl Institution. OF course this h not con-
s.drting thr United states as large
nunuclai institution.
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

''vhat has become 90 Hillf asks a SeN
York paper. David T.. James j. OF san
uaut
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

A remarkable series OF articles was
concluded i'm last months Everybody's
Magazine. entitled The Greatest
Trust ia the World" by ChaS T.
Russell Reciting al length the var
iCus methods Of the Beef Trust. which
Mr.. Russell shows controls not only
beef but practically All perishable pro
ducts. and which he characterize> as
the greatest and most perniclouS CON
hiuatiOn cNtant. Mr.. Russell backs up
his assertion with facts and figures to
show that this giant combination not
only CrindS the producer Of cattle aud
other livestock down 10 q bare exist
cncc. entirely controlling the amount
81 the production OF meat animals. but
that q regulates and manipulateS the
pricc Of meat for the Whole American
people with the same certainty that
the owner of patent medicine. whose
secret compounds are known only "a
himself. fixes the price O. his nosirum
Mr. Russell asks
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02
REMARKABLE ROADMAEER.
OIL. xPpTrED TO DIRT ROADS.
FORMS a SPLENDID SPEEDWAY.

oni, western OIL with Aschait Base
- Coed for Observation-Disclosures our
thousand Miles Oiled Roads IN
6aisfornias
How often great results come from
simple experiments la a>>s> toe
county OF lbs AngcleS. California.
made an experiment ia the Use ri crude
petroleum as means OF laying the
dist ai0ng n road six miles long ina thar
county The sole purpose OF this WORK
was merely 10 make trsvel along the
Rad more comfortable. Tor the dust
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

Mr. Rockefeller IS now credited WIKI
having obtained control 81 the pencil trust
Bnt he will never get the pencil pu~hcfs
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

Pennsylvania. Il Is stated. leads IN IN
production OF natural gas Which kind
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02
IaIe schemes OF Politicians.

There must ID no more rebates.
cries tire excited reformer. well aware
that the rebate is the root 81 all trust
erH. Well said. good reformer. But
how Will you stop relates one pro-
poses 20 enlarge the powers % the In
ferSfate Commerce Commission. and
one PROPOSES to establish rate-regu-
latlng courts. and one proposes
special session Of Congress. and one
proposes this law or the other. Beau
tiful pastimes Of the political mlndt
When We get sick and tired OF re-
bates. we can abolish them. But not 80
long as any considerable numier of Us
are trying 10 get them Tor ourselves
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

Solid black lines
rcprc~cntfhc railroad
mileage already com
~tructed. Dotted lines
represent fhe stretch
rs Set 90 ls built
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02
THR GREATEST OF TRUSTS.
OPERA Tf0yS or BEEF TRUST AND
RAILROADS INFINITELY
CONNECTED.

Charles Z. Russell Concludes Maga-
rine Articles Describing Methods
oE Trust and Suggests that Niorai
Side. OF Question Has Been Neg
icctSd-
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

The Washington Post remarks that Sea
ator Tiilman saws that saloon looks liAe
Hadcs But the Senator never used that
word '.HadeS.
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02
Present Laws Should Prevent
Rebates

Human ingenuity cannot ind any
more explicit prohibition 81 rebates
than the present laws contain. What
is tho sen~, of multiply iu- prohibitions
that DO not prohiotf How
can you prevent a thing that many
thousands of reputable business men
are trying to obtain Tor themselves.
and about which The community has
hazy or underlined vicwSf
THE weakness of the Anti-Irus
movement So Tar Is that 10 j. economic.
instead OF humanitarian and moral
That Is. it D. based On the idea that
some trust has diminished the prohiS
~ some individuals. ana these indi-
viduals are Justified ia compiain ins
uniH their profits are restored. and
than fhev arr. equally Justified iu Keep
Ing silence. - long as we can ne
fooled into thinking tbc trusts good ii
they make our individual business
good. So Ion. we shall have these
great combinations eucroachlug upon
and 0verp0wcring the Government"
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

Laws are enforced 10y the pressure ~
public opinion behind them. There Is
little pressure 81 public opinion behind
the enforcement 90 law against re-
fatc~. The part % the people that
suffers from the results % rebates does
not know WHY 90 suffers. ami the part
that does know does not care. because
it either gets or hopes 10 get rebates
for itself. hopes 20 gel them anil tries
iu all possible ways 90 get them. u
b. "a painful fact. states Mr.. Russell
that 90 the men that complain most
often and most loudly against these
conditions. few would admit anything
wrong in rebates if they could secure
for themselves the advantages which
they lccry iu others
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02
What is the Remedy ?

Now what * 10 be done? There
would H. plenty Of Independent. pack
ing concerns I'm operation within SIX
months 10 prevent monopoly M cattle
buying ami meat and general produce
selling. ir there could D. any reason
able certainty Of fair treatment ID
railroad rates and facilities. Twenty
firms would commence building To
day if they could have the assurance
OF an honest enforcement ~ the law
Therefore. the handspring 81 this mat
ter is the railroad question. Solve
that. and az once YOU settle The fate
IL this greatest 81 monopoileS.
~Buf how. he asks. will You solve
the railroad question: Not by passing
more laws about DO. Is 10 anything
but lunacv Il suppose that power
able 10 override. defy and nullify ths
existing statutes viii hc awed hy any
more Of these paper hullctinst W.
have laws enough now
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

birds Of feather do not always flock to-
eether at least In harmony. The hawk and
the chicken are sometimes very close. but
both are not az the tine enjoying NE.
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

II Is perhaps Just as well 20 teach It'll
girls fairy tales for then they won souh
~ strange when their husbands tell the'
later la life.
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

Even with the ave principal senses al
well developed. IL H. an excellent thing q
have common sense.
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

v hen man hits the d""h"H'u ua'''
The annie growers want a representative
mai appIe~ were intended by nature Tor
the Interior department
Secret Service officials report that very
little counterfeit money - being naae ~
thc country. IL Is probably more prontabie
aud less dangerous 10 20 into high finance
ina New York City
Secretary shaw says that he has made
no plans for leaving the Treasury ana &C
ccpting the presidency OF any large hhnh-
cial Institution. or course this b. not con
sdeting TIM United states as iA'Se
nunuclai Institution.
Mr.. Rockefeller IS now credited with
having obtained control ~ the pencil trust
But he will never get the pencil purhers-
Pennsylvania. Il Is stated. leads IN the
production Of natural gas which k'naf
The Washington Post remarks that Sea
at0F Tiilman saws that saloon LOOKS iiAr
Hadcs. But the Senator never used that
Birds Of a feather do not always foek to-
eether. at least In harmony The hawk and
| both arr not az The time enjoying iife.
II is perhaps inst as well to teach little
~ strange when their husbands tell them
later Ia life.
Even with the ave principal senses all
| we'll developed. ID Is an excellent thing 30
| have common sense
An nI wind n il indeed that blows no
| good Even the bad cooks are blessed by
| manufacturers OF dyspepsia tablets.
The number ~ lawyers. whose business
| II Is TO, exDound and uphold the law Is
| probably almost equal 90 the number 81
| lawycrs whose energies and abilities are
| devoted TO eyadsng and cheating the law
| Won cannot fool all the people all IN.
| time bur some OF the aetute business nei
| ~ this generation have kept the majority
Of them guessing the rest OF the uLns-
| The lobster industry OF Massachusetts, 4
threatened with extinction. There - STU
the political variety,
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

An ni wind n il indeed that blows no
good Even the bad cooks are blessed oy
manufacturers OF dyspepsia tablets
Virginia gazette. [volume] (Williamsburg, Va.) 1893-192?, 1905-09-02

The number of lawyers whose business
II Is to- expOund and uphold the law -
nrobah almost equal 90 the number or
Iawvcrs whose energies and abilities are
devoted 10 eyadsng and cheating the law.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1905-08-17
DON'T LIKE RAPID.
TRANSIT BELL CORDS
Honlulu, August Is, 1905.

Honlulu, August 15 1905
Editor Advertiser: 1 should like to
say few words to the Rapid Transit
through this medium for this reason:
If I write direct to the officials my
letter would more than likely get pig
eon-holed and die, but they can't
pigeon-hole it this way Unlike our
learned friend from the other side of
the city. 1 have no intention of telling
these people how to run their road. 1t
has been strict rule with me through
life, never to tell a man or corporation
how to run his or their business, but
to let the poor devils find it out them
selves. Neither have 1 any complaint
to make. 1t is one of the finest Sys-
TENS on the face of this planet and has
as gentlemanly, obliging and consider
ate set of men on both ends of the cars
as one would wish to meet. and / have
rambled some myself. But there is one
continuance obtaining here on the cars
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1905-08-17

that I have never seen elsewhere, and
that is the location of the bell rope and
fare-indicator rope In the position
they now occupy, conductor of ordi-
nary height must lean over his passen-
gers or crowd in between them to reach
the rope. and when this act is per-
formed in hurry, as frequently hap
pens, to prevent an accident, it is a
source of annoyance to the passenger
unlucky enough to be located beneath
the point of action. Hats are knocked
crooked, newspapers damned, ETC.
What is the objection to having the
bell cord run along the middle of the
car at a sufficient height to clear the
tallest mans hat? 1t would be much
more convenient for the conductor, and
decidedly more comfortable for the pas
senger. AS it is now, have no kick
to register. / can stand it if the rest
of the city can, only, 1 have several
times wondered how this awkward
contrivance of the bell cord ever crept
in on cars that We're SO we'll equipped
and appointed otherwise.
PATRON.