Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1905-10-26
DELICATE DISCOTRAGEMENT.

A Cortlandville man recently said Of
the late Col. Daniel S. Lamont. who
was born there: Lamont had always a
pleasant and tactful way. l once applied
to him for a Job for my son. He couldn't
do anything for the boy, but he put me
off dclicately and told me to break the
disappointment delicately to the lad.
''rhis talk OF delicacy and gentle. kind
~ putting Off reminded MIR. Lamont of a
C~ortlandville happening.
HE said there was once n poor young
chap in our town who fell head over
heels in love with a farm girl. The
young chaps love-making was very seri-
ously conducted. Sometimes it seemed
rather hopeless, and he would get Il fit of
the blues.
I'm a fit of the blues one night he con-
fidcd to II friend.
I'm afraid there's no chance for me-
he said. In n delicate way that girl is
discouraging my attentions to her.
"'How is she doing it" the friend
asked.
"'Oh. mighty ,lclicatcly. She told me
yesterday that she was a twin. her
was n twin"
AND HE NEVER TCMBLED.
''The death of Henry Irving" said n
reformed journalist, reminds me of the
great actors last tour Of America. In
the city on the banks Of the Erie canal
where l was then working the announce
ment that Irving woul appear for one
night only caused a tremendous sensa-
ton. and the entire capacity OF the locaI
opera house was sold out at triple prices
weeks before the date. OF course there
were no passes to be had, and the news
paper men let out a horrible howl.
'The city editor Of this particular shce,
] have in mind tried in every possible
way to get a pass to the Irving show
but there was absolutely nothing doing
He was thoroughly sore when a letter
arrived from the papers correspondent
at some crossroads settlement. asking
for two passes to Henry Irving, in tho
most guileless way imaginable.
""rhinking to emphasize the impossible
ity of getting any thing of the kind. thu
city editor wrote the correspondent a.
follows:
There was once a man who wen
into a restaurant and said to the pro
prietor: Il want a sirloin steak two
lncneS tnick, COOKED rare, WITH the Oioot
running out of it, Sir said the pro
prietor, If ! had a steak like that
:. would eat it myself
Very truly yours.
"'CITY EDITOR, Daily Began
"rhe next day the correspondent. who's
guilelcssness was not assumed replict
/, thus:
81 return n paragraph evidently in
, tended for the humorous column, an,
| would like to know whether | get thos'
Irving passes or not
4. ''Therc was no room for doubt as L
f the meaning of the answer the city edi
r tor sent then"
SHE REMEMBERED.
I Senator Tillman of South Carolina tell
. of n little girl who became known Il
{ schoO and Sunday school as "a littl
liar" One afternoon her mother over
| heard an argument with her playmate
. WillI Bangs. who tried to finish the dis
A cussion by saying: I'm older than you
G cause my birthday comes first in May
e and yours don't come until September.
I "Oh. Of course our birthday com
!, first answered little Nellie; but hat 1
o cause you came down first. ! remembe
4 looking mt the angels when they wer
t making you"
I Come here, Nellie" cried her mother
|. ut Is breaking mothers heart to hea