Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1905-12-17
SUNDAY MAGAZINE for DECEMBER II, 1905
Mr.. PUFFER'S CHRISTMAS
TOMB
By Jefferson Lee Harbour

M EN- is queer, now amt they?" Mrs.
lVl Puffer gave me no time to reply
to this somewhat ambiguous question,
but Immediately added:
Anyhow, some men is, and Puffer's
one O. them. know that | once went
to the mat, and girl come out
considerable scand 'lous as to the way
she was dressed, or undressed, and she
sung song about man whose heart
was right, after all, and somehow
thought O Puffer. He's turrible grumpy
and snappy good deal O the time, and
seems to be irwin to rub in on me the
idee that I'm the dirt under his feet; but
let me git real sick and there's nothing
he won't do or have done for me.
Once | come mighty nigh passin' on
with fearful shock O. airysipilus and
heerd Puffer sobbin in corner, and it
chirked me up SO dun no but it was the
means O. me pullin through.
Il know | read story once about an
old couple ridin' along in a buggy, and
the boss run away and upset 'ern, and the
old lady was stunned until she was uncon-
scious, but the old man wa mt hurt much.
And when the old lady come to he says:
Why, ma, thought sure you was killed,
and she looked up at him and says real
sharp: You did, hey? And there amt a
tear in your eyel 1 should think you might
of had the decency to of bawled little
if you thought l was dead!' And she
jawed him all the way home until dun
no but he was sorry she ever come to.
Didn't show much heart, did he?
Well, Puffer bawled' in a right plea
sim way when he feared that was goin'
to leave this earthly vale O. tears, and I've
remembered it many a time since when
he's been grumpy. Then I've had other
proof that Puffer's heart was all right
and that his bark is wuss than his bite.
So many men are that way. l reckon
the pore things can't help it. | tell you
not many men wear their hearts on their
sleeves, as the sayin' is. They're more
apt to keep 'em up their sleeves like a
gambler does his trump card, and then
haul 'em out only when the 'casion de-
mands it. Amt l right"
You usually are, Mrs. Pufer.''
I'm right far as Puffer is concerned,
and just want to tell you of the latest
proof I've had that Puffer means well. 1t
was in connection with all this Christmas
wear and tear that we have lived through
without comm down with nervous pros
peration or bein' carried to the insane asy-
lum. Christmas must be a turrible strain
on them that goes in heavy, and it can't
be much of a joy time to the shop-gir1s
pore critters! Still, it's all meant for
the best, and a lot O happiness does come
out O. all the fuss and bother it causes,
and the good Lord knows that there's
need O all the happiness anybody kin
put into the world.
And now | want to tell you that I
never knowed a man that made more
complaint and fuss about what he calls
all this Christmas tomfoo1ery' than
Puffer does. I've even heerd that man
go to the Zenith of sayin' that he thought
there ought to be a law ag'in' it and that
he'd like to ketch himself goin' into it,
but | take notice that he a11us wants a
good Christmas dinner and that l find
a five-dollar bill or gold piece under my
plate when turn it over, and if go to
thank him for it he snaps at me.
:" AS for hangin' up stockins or any