The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-07-22
JAYHA WKER JOTS

The Seneca Tribune wonders if Gov
ernor Hoch has Accountant Rowett's
report locked UP with Kelly's resigna-
ton in escrow
Nemaha threatens to raise the big
gest crop of corn that ever came down
the pike. if the showers continue at
the proper intervals little longer.
Kansas has 1885 goats, but Seward
Jones says that none of 'em are in
Cloud county except those that are
kept locked up in the lodge rooms.
The Clay Center Times, presuming
that S. S. Smith of Abilene has a cinch
on the nomination for attorney gen
eral for next year, calls him Sure
Shot Smith,
The Marion Record wishes to know
if the appointment of Fred Knapp as
executive clerk will also be charged up
to Marion county. Fred's uncle ran
grocery store in Marion county a few
years ago.
The story is floating around that
Kansas sent to Mexico to get a horned
toad to eat the flies in the Goss collec-
ton room at the state house. Is this
true? If so, why was a Mexican toad
imported? Kansas has horned toadS
by the millions, and why should they
Mexican labor be imported and given
an easy berth in the state house? This
is another point to be charged against
the administration.
1t is announced that Downs will
celebrate its birthday this year with
out getting drunk. The "27th of
Downs was doing business each year
along about the last of July long be-
fore the street fair and the carnival
were invented. and heretofore it has
always been customary to have an
abundance of liquid refreshments on
hand. Some people, in fact, have re-
ferred to the event as Downs annual
drunk" This year, however, there will
~, Il rr-1Ir -rlc
They will have to spend their money
in the stores and go home sober
Billy Morgan writes his latest Euro
pean letter from Venice and here is
part of his description of that town:
Venice is a night town. In the even
ing the canals are filled with gondolas
and everybody is out for good time.
Regular musical clubs drift along with
the sweetest Italian opera rendered
with real ability, and arias and Italian
serenades and love songs until you
think the world is nothing but lights
glancing on the water, drifting gon-
dolas, song and giadness. Every few
minutes one of the singers will pass the
hat and you contribute two or three
cents and remember you are still on
earth. We sit at our hotel and watch
the gay crowd in the passing gondolas,
or for a few cents get into one, lean
back on the easy cushions, smoke a
two-cent cigar Il do, not Mrs. Nor
gam and forget all about these poor
people with their poverty and their
ffeas. They have forgotten them
themselves.
! Bert Walker: Old Bill Shiftless is
| Just getting round again after celebrat-
| ing the Fourth. Mrs. Shiftless wanted
Bill to stay home and they would have
| the old folks over and she would get
| up a nice dinner and they could all
rest up in the evening. Bill said it had
been so blamed long since he had gone
| any place that he thought he would
run down the road a piece and cele-
brate. He went His wife got out his
white shirt, collar and necktie. and
| fixed him up. Bill got there and the
! first thing he did was to hunt up some
/ beer. He intended to go to the speak
| ing, see the ball game and some
friends He got "onto" a place at the
outskirts of town where they sold beer
| in an old barn and he made for there
the first thing. He stayed and stayed.
BY noon he was so drunk he couldn' t
| hit the ground with his hat He
crawled off in the weeds and took a
nap. He woke up about o'clock and
proceeded to spend his last two dol
lars for, more beer, and by dark was
again sloppy He went down town
and staggered around until the mar
shall ran him in. Two days later he
showed up at home. He was dirty, his
clothes were torn, and he felt bum.
I"Good gracious. Bill, where have you
been?" asked his wife HE'LL" shout
ed Bill, mad as a hornet "does a man
have to tell his woman everything %