Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1905-01-21


suit? links No. my tailor SAYS he
can't afford it-Cincnnati Tribune.
Compromise: Miranda-No, Fred.
won't take the armchair: you take It.
fred-Er- suppose we both take it?--
Life
Young pr. Swift calls every day on
the little widow" Dear me! Is she
as i'll as all that?" No, but she is
as pretty as all that"-Ex
foodle-My dear girl. have little
more sense than You give me credit FOR.
Mrs. Poodle / am glad of thai for
your sake! Illustrated Bits.
DE only thing dat some people gifts
out of education" said Uncle Eben, lis
de ability TO talk SOS people can't un-
derStand EN-. Washington Star.
Kinks Skinnem tells me he Is going
into CatrhcmS law Office as partner.
'tAGS-DceSn't he mean as AN accom-
pli'c: Cinuati Commercial-Tr Tribune.
Shells skin grating a very late dis
coycrH? he NO il is only new
branch Of very old art all grating
Is Il skin process Detroit Free Press.
knicker So the Newriches are get
ting culture? Booker Yes, they have
learned To speak of a house beautiful
instead of beautiful house New
York sun
Nroker No more margin 10 put up?
Why. when the account was opened
you told ME you were well off. Lamb
ley--So was, hut didn't know it
Town Topics
she -Did you ever take your automo-
bile apart to see how IL workedY He
Wen, not exactly have taken it
apart 10 see how il didn't work Y0n-
kcrs Statesman.
Mayme- What gossip Mrs Gadhy
is, Edith Yes. indeed never tell
her anything without finding out that
She has already told il herself Phil
adclphia Bulletin.
MIR Jones My daughter is only is.
You had better wait until she Is older.
The Lover Wen, Eve waited two
years for hcr to get older. but she sim
stays al lS Judge.
After the Wake: Mrs. Cassidy
Twas very natural he looked. Mrs.
Casey Aye! shure he looked fur all
thr wurld loike a lowe man layin' there
dead. illustrated Bits.
Giles SO you've got place IN that
banking house, | suppose II was be-
cause YOU knew the president? Har-
ris Partly that, and partly because
he didn't know me- Boston Tran
script
Aunt Hannah--Have yon told any
one Of your engagement TO Mr.. Sweet
| er? Edith No. ! haven't told soul
| except Bessie Miller, who thought he
WIS going 10 ask her. Boston Tran
script.
Johnny Geehaw-,Paw, what's the
| law IF grayitatlon? Farmer Geehaw
I dunno hain't got time to keep
up with all the fool statoots the durn
legislator passes Louisville Courier
journal.
lIlghwayman How much money
| have you got? lieldup-i couldn't
guess. HighWnyman--You can't guess
the amount? lTcdup--No. Highway
man Then give it up Cleveland
Plain Dealer
\ciGhbors heard your dog howl ling
last night IT he bowls three nights
in succession IT'S sure sign of denih.
NcNtdoor ludeedl And who do You
THINKS viii die? Neichbors The dog.
chicago News
Seedy Stranger Excuse me, sir. but
can you change dollar for me- IIu-
manitarian Why yes Seedy Stranger
Thanks And now viii kindly tell
nae whore / can get the dolIar2-C ieyo-
land Plain Dealer
THAT Mrs %nag.s IS too much Of n
aristycrat fur me to mlngle wild"
'IIow's thatE' She was Knocked down
ny push cart ana She had il put into
de paper dat she was hit by an autcr-
mobile '- Detroit Free Press
Tommy Smokn' cigarettes IL dcad
sure 10 hurt yer Jimmy ~G'on! Whore
dH yer git dat uoti0nf From pop"
''Aw, hr WIZ iist strmgin yer" no.
he wasn't etrin@in' me. be wuz strap
PIN ne bats how / knows &c hurts"
catholic Standard and Times
"II"w do you account for the fact
asked the doctor. as shown by actual
,e>tigailon that tbirty-tW0 ont % er-
cry hundred criminals in the country
are lrft hauded| That's easily ac-
counted for said the professor, the
other ~ixry-cighl are right handed w.
Loui"n Tit Bits
say said the girls dear little
brother are Won a baseball playerr''
w replied young Mr.. Slowton,
what mad" YOU ask That" "Oh.
nothing. only when MA was askm sis,
fhe other day whether you was ever
gnim. 10 nnnLn I'D haL. Sic said II lnnhch