Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1905-12-27
A Puzzling Disease
EOriginal.1

WGT0 ClOS6Q D6ul1u
Good morning, Alice. What can
do for your
Doctor, 1 wish you to tell me the
symptoms Of some unusual disease"
"What for"
IL am in love with recent graduate
of the College of Physicians. He is in
love with the science Of medicine. /
wish him to become interested in me
through my disease"
"You little fraudr'
'This is a world Of fraud, doctor"
'You mean a world Of fraud for wo-
men,"
Certainly; we have not the power to
gain our ends openly"
'YOu are at least frank"
Come, doctor; there's a dear, good
man, tell meswhat wish to know"
do you love him very much?'
eyes"
"And will die If you don't get him?"
eyes"
''Then 1 must save you"
Going to a rosewood desk, he wrote
something, folded the paper and hand
ed it to her.
"These are the symptoms of a dis
ease that no physician can determine,
for there Is no such disease, unless it
be love-"
"Thank you, doctor. 1 must ask you
to wait awhile for your fee, for have
not a cent. Besides, think doctors
should be paid in proportion to the
value Of their advice. If your disease
succeeds will pay you double; if it
fails will pay you nothing"
"But how will you pay double if you
have nothing to pay?"
"You are very stupid, doctor. The
man 1 wish to impress is rich"
'You villainp'
"You villains accomplish! After all,
the chicanery is not solely with our
SEX"
ooh, yes, it is. 1t emanates from wo-
men and is catching with men,"
"Goodby, doctor. Thank you"
The girl passed out by a side door.
A few weeks later DR.. Cords re-
ceived call from physician who had
been his pupil and was a great favor
lite with him, young DR.. Thorax.
Doctor" said Thorax, II wish to
consult you about a patient Of mine
who has symptoms nowhere to be
found in our medical works, a very
puzzling case" And DR.. Thorax pro-
ceeded to give his former preceptor the
symptoms the latter had laid down for
the young girl.
'These symptoms" said DR.. Cords
after perusing them, would be best
studied BY a careful and constant su-
pervision Of the patient. You must get
the young woman into position where
you can be with her night and day."
'But that could only be done by mar
"Well." ''e'~ !. iA'is--l !: i
st am not thinking Of being mar
ried."
"Then you have only to turn over
your case to some one else"
"But I can never be satisfied till I
have found the correct diagnosis"
Doctor, you must settle this matter
for yourself"
DR.. Thorax went away much puz-
Zled. For the first time in his life he
began to think Of woman with refer
ence to possessing her, and when such
an idea takes root in mans head it
grows like a mushroom. His fascina-
ton for the study Of the peculiar dis
ease Of Miss Alice Bland and this new
idea were like two bumblebees alter
nately buzzing in his bonnet No soon
er did he get rid of the one than he
was beset by the other.
DR.. Cords health gave way under
strain Of too much work, and he went
abroad. He returned quite recovered
and took up his practice. One morning
he received card, "Mrs. Henry B.
ThoraX," and in another moment re
ceived the lady.
"Good morning, doctor. have come
to pay my bill"
''Bill? Do you mean to insult me by
offering me money for
"You did it all. 1 only planned it.
1 told you that if it succeeded would
pay you double"
You mean the man you shared
would pay me double"
Exactly"
Every well. Physicians never make
each other any charge"
'In that case have to thank you
for the deception you practiced in my
favor"
Deception! I deceive?"
Certainly. You carried out my
scheme to secure a husband admira-
bly,"
II did not. 1 remained neutral. l
told Thorax that he could only find out
your disease by marrying you"
IF you had told the truth you would
have revealed my plan"
THAT would not have been acting
hOnorably toward you"
Nonsense. That's mans boosted
logic. Would you respect the conf
dence Of a man who told you be was
about to rob another of his money!"
HN0O