davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The new enterprise. (Madison, Fla.) 1901-1908, 1905-01-05

How Smiths Friend Got TnroGEas
They were out in Kansas about 100
miles and wanted TO reach Kansas
City. one Of them had a pass f0r
John Smith and wife. lie was John
Smith all right. but his friend could
hardly pass as Mrs. Smith. Although
they were practically without funds,
they boarded the train. Take II seat
In the rear Of the car" said Smith to
his friend.
Then Smith went forward and sat
down by young woman. Soon they
were talking like old friends, and the
subject Of tickets was brought mp by
Smith. He asked her to let him SEQ
her ticket 1t was not Of the variety
that requires the signature Of the pur-
chaser.
Smith examined II until the con-
ductor came through, and then be
handed up his pass and the ticket
Pointing to his friend behind. he said,
'Trhe extra ticket is for him" Tie
scheme worked To this day the
young woman does not know that she
was once Mrs. Smith for a short ride
through Kansas, Kansas City Times.
The new enterprise. (Madison, Fla.) 1901-1908, 1905-01-05
Stomach troubles and Constipation

"Chamberlain's Stomach and Liver
Tablets are the best thing for stomach
troubles and constipation l have ever
sod, !" says j. r. Cullman, druggist Of
Potterville, Mich. They are easy to take
and always give satisfaction. tell my
customers to try them and if not salts
factory TO come back and get their mon
ey, but have never had a complaint. For
sale by ID. g. Smith and al. druggists.
The new enterprise. (Madison, Fla.) 1901-1908, 1905-01-05
nlnIomatic Corps Costumes.

An interesting fact not generally
bOvn in regard to the diplomatic
Orpp 10 that a member Of that august
|bdy cannot, under the penalty OF Of
|bdil reprimand and danger Of recall,
,upear at fancy ball in the national
costume. This fact was developed one
wening when a large fancy ball was
oven at one OF the private houses on
|he same evening Of a presidential re-
|nption to the diplomatic corps. Those
la the diplomats who attended the
|ball later in the evening were obliged
10 first change the court costumes worn
|lt The White House, Inquiry on the
bart Of curious friends developed the
reason Just stated.
The new enterprise. (Madison, Fla.) 1901-1908, 1905-01-05
NM. one Thing Lacking.

Emperor william II. wrote poem
,,ce which be submitted to a great lit
rsy man who dined at the castle for
@,t purpose particularly. The critic
'sss Il and found his dual duties In
.~nsIct He had to advise an amateur
ssst with an exceptional power for re-
s,DtIug a hostile comment. He yielded
s1lr a very little to the exigencies Of
M situation. "This verse, your mai
py," be began, seems to require al
trtiOn in certain respects The au-
;bOr took the manuscript and conned
4 tbuughtfully; then his brow cleared.
,Tby" be cried, as one seeing a sud
An IIeht, ~ have actually not signed
A, pcem! Give me a penn And the
mly fault he saw In the work was
bthwth remedied.
The new enterprise. (Madison, Fla.) 1901-1908, 1905-01-05
MOrtuary.

Died on Thursday, Dee, 20, al
Live Oak, viii Z. Rogers, ortyphoid
fever. lie was Madison boy and
had many friends here who regret
his death. Ills parents are houored
residents Of Madison county, The
body was inferred in the city Gene,
terry Friday afternoon.
The new enterprise. (Madison, Fla.) 1901-1908, 1905-01-05
Got All the New. Promptly.

A countryman gave the following
reason for not subscribing to a local
newspaper: II get all the news there
Is. My wife belongs to the woman's
club, one Of my daughters works in the
millinery shop and the other is In the
delivery window at the postofice, and
I'm the village grocer. "-Boston Com
mercial Bulletin.
The new enterprise. (Madison, Fla.) 1901-1908, 1905-01-05
A Queer Feed.

A most singular food IL the larvae
Of a 1y common in certain portions
Of California and known M ephydra.
This insect is found In such vast guam
ities in Lake Mono, Call that It is
washed upon the shores in vast wind
rows and can be collected by bushels.
The water Of Mono is very singular,
seemingly very heavy and smooth, like
oil. so much so that It resists ordinary
wind and refuses TO become rufled.
When the larvae begin TO appear the
Indians gather from far and near and
scrane them up, place the wormlke
creatures on cloths and racks in the
sun and dry them, when they are
beaten up and husEed, looking then
like rice The Indians call the food
koo-chah.bee, and many bushels are
collected Mt his time. That larvae are
nutritious Is shown by the condition
OF the Indians, who soon grow fat on
the rich Diet Many birds are attract
ed 10y the larvae and gorge themselves
with the singular food
The new enterprise. (Madison, Fla.) 1901-1908, 1905-01-05

Sunday morning-New Years day
at 1890 o'clock, the body Of little
William Taylor was laid to rest,
Saturday morning a thrill of sorrow
and sympathy went over Madison
from center to furthest limits as the
news was told-''Will Taylor's baby
is dead" The little fellow had been
i'll for two months with cholera in
fantum and bis death was but a re.
lease from awful suffering. He wss
born Dec. 9TH, 1908, and was taken
Home Dec. 81, 1904, We extend
profoundest sympathy to the bereav-
ed family.
The new enterprise. (Madison, Fla.) 1901-1908, 1905-01-05

Dnmer-My wife and l always pass
upon and decide our household ques-
hpns quite as seriously as though we
were voting upon the national issues.
|HenpeCk-Well, whenever my wife ami
D pull of an election like that she al
ways wins by one vote.-Philadelphia
II tars
The new enterprise. (Madison, Fla.) 1901-1908, 1905-01-05
Nobility Of Pnrnone.

Go before no man with trembling,
but know well that all events are in.
different and nothing to thee, for what
|err II may be it shall lie with thee IN
Iuse It Dobly; this no man can prevent,
-Epietetns.
The new enterprise. (Madison, Fla.) 1901-1908, 1905-01-05

The farlt Of giving children medicine
containing injurious substances is some
times more disastrous than the disease
from which they are suffering. every
mother should know that Chamberlain
Cough Remedy is perfectly safe for chi.
dren TO take. 1t contains nothing harm
ful and for coughs, colds and Group Is
unsurpassed Sold by d. G, Smith ana
all druggists.
The new enterprise. (Madison, Fla.) 1901-1908, 1905-01-05
Cham berlaln's cough Remedy the Best
Made

TN my opinion Chamberlain Cough
Remedy is the best made for colds, "sarb
Mrs, Cora Walker Of PorterN lille, Cal.
There is no doubt about it being the
best, No other will cure cold 80
quickly. No other is so sure proven
tive Of pneumonia, No other is SO plea.
SAINT and safe to take. These are good
reasons why it should be preferred to
any other, The fact Is that few people
are satisfied with any other after having
once used this remedy. For sale by ID.
q. Smith and all druggists.
The new enterprise. (Madison, Fla.) 1901-1908, 1905-01-05
Cured LumbARo

A. b, Cunmau, Chicago, writes March
1, 1903: Having been troubled with
Lumbago at different times aud tried
one physician after another; then dille
ent olntments and luiments, gave 1t up
alto4e ether, 80 | tried once more aud
got a bottle Of Balard's Snow Linrmeut
which gave me- almost instant rellet |
can cheerfully recommend it and viii
add my name TO your list Of tormer sui
ferers." 2jc 5Oc and 81 at DAVIS drug
store.
The new enterprise. (Madison, Fla.) 1901-1908, 1905-01-05
For SALE.

Three head good, sound, young
mules, also, 1900 bushels corn, at place
known as Simpkin's place, twelve miles
west of Madison. Terms cash. Apply
v. p. Harmeling. Madison, Fla.
The new enterprise. (Madison, Fla.) 1901-1908, 1905-01-05
Great Society Play.

Young Mrs. Winthrop" beau
tiful society drama, will be presented
at the armory next Monday night by
local talent fer the benefit of the mil
itary company under the direction Of
Mr.. Fred Miller assisted by Misses
Mae Lines, Cornelia Witberspoon,
Clara Coggins, Gladys Thornton and
Messrs Thornton, Amos, Morrow,
Rowe, Wade and Parramore. This
promises TO be a most enjoyable af-
far and bcin! for the benefit Of a
worthy cause it should be literally
palruniZtd. SEATS on sale at DAVE
drug store. Prices, rs, So and SOC.
The new enterprise. (Madison, Fla.) 1901-1908, 1905-01-05
Cured his Mother Of Rheumatism

My mother has been Il sufferer for
many years from rheumatism, says W.
II. Howard OF Husband, Penn. AT
times shs was enable to move at all,
while at all times walking was painful,
presented her with a bottle of Cham
berlain's Pain Balm and after few APP
pications she decided it was the most
wonderful pain relieyer she had ever
tried, in fact, she Is never without it
now aud j. at all times able to walk. AN
0 casional u l., alton ofp.in balm Keeps
away the pain that she was formerly
troubled with" For sile by ID. q.
Smith and AL druggists.
The new enterprise. (Madison, Fla.) 1901-1908, 1905-01-05

tombstone is about the only place
|Vhere the average man doesn't really
pare TO have his name In print
The new enterprise. (Madison, Fla.) 1901-1908, 1905-01-05
FOR SALE.

Two acre lot with new three.room
ioO'e, situated in desirable resident
paH OF town, near homes Of r. ID
Rowe and D. G. Smith.
Also, six acres OF land in pecan
|'ees adjoining the above.
"'ll sell together or separately.
Vi b It RANDELL PORE.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1905-04-14
Presence of Mind.


The following is n true story Of an
Incident that happened in an English
village:
\ husband had gone out for the even
ing and left his wife and child at home
The woman was about to retire for the
night when, to her amaZement. she per-
Ccived TIE foot of a man beneath the
bed Instead of calling for assistance
as some would have done, she coolly
went TO the child's cot and sat and
sang till the child went to sleep. Two
hours then remained before her luS
band came in. lie was surprised to
Ind her waiting up, but when his wife
landed him an envelope. saying, You
might run and post this" the cause of
Ler waiting was revealed. Instead of
letter tie following was written on
the envelope: "A burglar is under our
bed. Run: fetch police" The husband
returned i'll Il minute with a policeman,
AMI the man was arrested. The bur
glar when brought up before the mag
iStrate remarked that he had come
across few brave women in his time,
but this one must have had nerve
like iron. for she sat there for three
solid hours. lie had the impression
that she Didn't know he was there till
the policeman pulled him out.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1905-04-14
ACROSS COUNTRY.

The signs of the times point to an enor-
nous increase of intelligent public interest
in health: to new generation with purer,
stronger blood aud therefore more active
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1905-04-14
Both.

Isidor Rayner, the new senator from
Maryland, has been leading lawyer in
that state for thirty years. He was in
congress while the Mckinley tariff bill
was under discussion. One day, while
arguing an amendment, he casually re-
marked that everything is either lux.
ury or necessity" Here he was inter-
rupted with a question from a member
who generally kept himself in most un-
kempt condition. 81 understand you to
say that everything is either luxury or
a necessity" said the disheveled member;
"now, have just taken bath. Which
would you call that ?" Angered at such
a trivial interruption, Mr.. Rayner re-
piled, icily: I'm your case it is both ne
cessity and luxury; necessity because
you need it SO badly, and luxury be-
cause you take it so rarely. The Argo-
naut
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1905-04-14
He Was Bald-Headed.

May the saints preserve ye,," said an
old woman in Washington, who had
been given a quarter by Congressman
Cooper, of Wisconsin, IAN may every
hair O. your head be a candle to light
your way to gloryw
well, it won't be such dod-gasted
torchlight procession at that" Mr..
Cooper answered as a gust of wind took
off his hat, showing a shining crown.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1905-04-14
The Time to Charge.

At the taking of Moscow while the
troops sat in their saddles under muir
der0us fire Murat. NapOleon's dashing
chief of cavalry. received a dispatch to
which an answer was required. Though
his mettle;ome horse was trembling,
AIurat laid the leins upon the horn of
the saddle, took his notebook in one
hand and Il pencil in the other and be-
san to write response. Suddenly a
shell fell and exploded on the ground
close by. Tie horse lcaped into the air
and swung wildly around. Murat Sim
ply transfC erred the pencil to the hand
that held the notebook, calmed the
horse with the other hand and then
went on writing his dispatch as If
nothing had happened. y shout of adj
niiration went up along the line. Murat
saw that tie enthusiasm aroused by his
trifling act had created Il favorable mo-
mcnt for a charge. He gave the order,
and his men swept clear through the
enemy's line.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1905-04-14

The free and easy manners of the
political and literary friends with
whom Burke associated are exhibited
Ly personal anecdote. He often ask
Cd his friends TO sup on beefsteak or
Il leg OF mutton. One night the house
sat late, and Burke brought home to
supper Fox and two or three more Of
tie Wig politicians. Mrs. Burke's
face told of the ill provided larder.
Surely" said the host, answering his
wife's look Of annoyance, there's beef
enough
Fox and another gentleman, seeing
the state of affairs, hurried off to a
tavern, where they obtained such
dishes as could be purchased. Amid
much laughter, they returned and set
the table With the food they had for
aged. Burke called them the most
Skiilful of walters, and there was an
amusing, satisfactory supper.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1905-04-14
Brain Leaks.

Prayer is petition, not a mandamus
Dividing the swag does not lessen the
crime.
Splurging around is not a sure sign Of
earnestness.
The man who goes cunning for trouble
never runs short of ammunition.
Some people conjure up trouble and
imagine that they are bearing heavy
crosses.
The chief trouble about thinking twice
before acting once is that some other
fellow is liable to jump in and seize the
opportunity about the time we begin on
the second thought.
The reform that begins in the home is
usually reform based on solid founda-
ton.
The consecrated Christian has a purse
easily opened at the call of distressed
humanity.
1t is easy to cheer the winner, but that
does not materially help along needed
reforms.
Some men spend so much time in get
ting ready to die that they make a dis
NAL failure of life.
The man who feels like doing some
thing foolish generally has his excuse all
framed up in advance.
We know men who exhaust their cheer
fulness at the office and turn on the
trouble faucet at home.
True happiness consists largely in get
ting what you actually need, not in get
ting what you think you want.
The man whose honor can be satisfied
only with blood usually has an honor
that needs disinfectant.
When a man has learned to get along
with what he has he has learned the first
lesson in getting along.
Classic music is the kind that most of
us encore for the purpose of hearing the
performers render something we like.
Some men never learn the difference be-
tween fame and notoriety, and some
men are forever installing reputation for
character.
Many men have achieved reputation
for philanthropy because they gave back
the collar button to the man from whom
they stole shirt.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1905-04-14
An Unpronisinq Field.

Mr.. Yipsley, was just on the point OF
leaving his house for his place of business
downtown when there came a ring at
the front doorbell. He opened the door.
A canvasser stood outside.
Il beg your pardon" said the can
vasser, but I'd like to show you SAM
PIE of our improved talking machine"
II think l don't care to see it," replied
Mr.. Yipsley.
you are not interested in talking ma
chimes perhaps" ventured the other.
81 can't say that either; but Ihave one
already. Talks all day long. Never
needs winding up. Never runs down"
At this moment high pitched voice
from somebody at the top of the stair
way broke into the conversation.
st isn't sou exclaimed the person
with the high pitched voice. "Itisn't so
But I've got a growing machine that
runs whenever it's in the house"
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1905-04-14
10 Eesspa1 asNIzpcep
BEL AIR, Md, APRIL -, 1905.
Getting Ready.

Getting Ready.
Senator Graball called in his valet and
proceeded to question him.
as my grip packed"
YES, sab"
"Got my trunk all ready"
eyes. sah."
Got my fishing tackle and guns in
good shape?"
"Yes, sah''
did you get the transportation sent
you for yesterday"
yes, sab. done got all the tickets
w'ot you asked me fob, sab"
Get that list of new novels l made
out?"
"Yes, sab; got EN- all, sab"
SIS my medicine chest properly stocked
with the articles usually carry on my
journeyings?"
Eyes, sab; got de finest line o medicines
you evan had, sah."
"Berths engaged clear through"
les, san.
We'll, you may tell my secretary that
he will have nothing to do but answer
letters from my constituents for the next
three months. I'm going to the
mountains for month, then to the
coast for month, and then to Hot
Springs for another month"
"Yes, sah."
After the valet had disappeared Sena-
tor Graball yawned and muttered to
himself:
These committee assignments during
the congressional recess are very annoy
ing, but l really must investigate the
questions arising in connection with that
house freight rate BILL"
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1905-04-14
Strange Disappearance.

The German on his native heath has
some peculiar notions about wit and hu-
NOR, some of them being droll and others
dreary. A tourist with his bride asked a
driver if there was anything remarkable
about the mountain they were ascend.
ing, and he answered:
mo, nothing particular about the hill
itself, but there is queer story connec-
ted with it."
please give US the legend"
"Well, once upon a time young lady
and gentleman went up this mountain
together, and hundreds of people saw
them go higher and higher, until they
disappeared and they never came back. "
"What became of them ?"
"rhey went down on the other side"
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1905-04-14
A RibIe LEGEND of the Panther.

One of the oldest stories in the ''Bes-
tiarieS," or stories of Bible animals
written by the monks, is the legend of
the panther. The panther" SO the
homily runs, lis the most beautiful of
all beasts. More than this, when 1t
goes abroad it diffuses n marvellous
sweet perfume. This odor is so sweet
that all the other beasts and birds fol-
low tie panther wherever it goes.
Wherefore the panther is a type Of vir-
tue" Perhaps the old monks who bor-
rowed and embellished this story had
heard of and misunderstood the strong
and its relations, the lions and Loop
ards, often show.-London Spectator.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1905-04-14
Meals and Weight.

1t has been seriously asserted by
many people that We are naturally
lighter after meal and they have
even gone the length of explaining this
by the amount of gas that is developed
from the food. Average observations,
however, show that we lose pounds
ounces between night AMI morning;
that we gain 1 pound i ounces by
breakfast; that we again lose about II
ounces before lunch; that lunch puts
on an average Of a pound; that we
again lose 10 ounces, but that an ordi-
nary dinner to healthy persons adds =
pounds . ounces to their weight.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1905-04-14
Resisting Termination

The joy of resisting temptation is the
highest joy men can feel. 1t is n mo-
ment when our little life here grows
larger and we feel ourselves lifted into
wider sphere. We have a sense of
fellowship with higher beings and are
somehow conscious of their sympathy.
All Gods creation smiles upon us and
appears made for our joy.-A. B. Da-
n.ilsnnn
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1905-04-14

When witness In an English court
the other day remarked that it was
necessary to sit on borse's head when
he was down to keep him quiet the
judge replied: Nothing of the kind
People don't seem to understand that
the only thing necessary is to get hold
of his ear and keep his nose up in the
air. / have seen a lady keep a horse
quiet in that way without soillng her
gloves"
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1905-04-14
TRAINS SOUTHWARK.

An additional train will leave Bel Air
on Saturday and Wednesday only at s
p. NJ, arriving in Baltimore at 9 p. NJ.
Returning leave Baltimore at 11.45 p.
NJ, arriving at Bel Air 12.45 A. NJ.
An additional train will leave Cardiff
for York and intermediate stations at
COS A. NJ. Returning will leave York
at 5.35 p M.
SUNDAY TRAINS.
Sunday trains leave Baltimore for Delta
and intermediate stations at $50 A. M.
and 400 P. NJ, stopping at Bel Air at o
A. NJ. and $50 p. M. Leave Delta for
Baltimore and intermediate stations at
6.55 A. M. and $50 P. M, stopping at
Bel Air at 1855 A. M. and f. 80 p NJ Adj
ditional train leaves Bel Air for Balti-
more and intermediate stations at $40
p. NJ, and Baltimore for Bel Air at 10 90
p. NJ, arriving at Bel Air at 11.20 p. NJ.
and Baltimore at $50 p NJ.
CA. FIFER, General Passenger Agent
]. S. NORRIS, General Manager.
The Paducah sun. [volume] (Paducah, Ky.) 1898-1906, 1905-07-20
GkUZY STORY
TOLD BY NEGRO BOY WHO HAD
BEEN STEALING BICYCLES.
VIII frroid Held On Two Charges of
House Brcaking-Otber Police
Court News.

There were two felony cases be-
fore Police Judge u. l.. Sanders this
morning.
Dennis Reed, small mulattu
about - years old, pleaded guilty
% stealing Waiter Sullivan's bicycle
but said that he was paid to do so,
some other negro giving him some
whiskey to take the wheel.
The youth failed to explain why
he did not turn the wheel over to the
negro who paid him to steal it in
stead of selling If for $2,75. Judge
Sanders held him over for obtaining
money by false pretenses.
VIII Arnold, colored who admit
ted having broken into the residence
of VIM Zaiss and stolen a pistol sew
eral weeks ago, and also to have TAX
en- a shot gun from another residence
a year ago, waived examination and
was held over on two separate cases.
Other cases were: Auzy Chandler,
white. breach of the peace, $40 and
costs; David Gordon. white, drunk
and disorderly. So and costs; Geo
Woodward, colored. breach of tbs
peace $40 and costs.