davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The San Francisco call., 1905-08-19

e3 rooms fine new brick building; choice
central location: newly furnished in best oak
tric elevator. lights ard all modern conven-
FENCES: beautiful, light and airy halls; In fact
splendid proposition: can be bought for less
than half cost to furnish; part cash, balance
long time at low interest; price $4,000
nished throughout: always full and pays hand
somely; biggest bargain in city; price $1,000
% rooms: new. modern buildings; new and
elegantly furnished; frst-cass downtown To-
cation; cheap rent with lease; most complete
mouse OF Its Size in city; call for particulars
20 rooms; new. modern. downtown house
cheap rent. long Lease well furnished; first
class condition: choice location and clears over
WOO per month; to be sold at big bargain.
"a rooms. beautiful little apartment house;
choice location: cheap rent; elegantly FUR
nished; and rooms each; new, modern In
every particular; i'll health cause Of sale
IA rooms: fine location: rent only $50; north
Market good furniture and carpets; all fuli;
price $3.50.
23 rooms. downtown; rent 500; good furni-
ture and carpets, and II run right make
a mint Of money out of IL and will only take
S2Oo to get in; balance can be paid out OF
house; price $1,000
19-room corner house; fine location; oak fur
niture. good carpets; everything hrst-ciass con-
oilioIi' all 1uu ana clearing 30 per month"; oA4
excellent buy at $1250
rooms; central; rent S32 co. elegantly fur
nished little home; fine buy at $3.50.
1s rooms; Ellis ST.; rent only $40; newly fur
nished; finest kind of location: bargain, SIooo.
81 rooms; fine corner: downtown; cheap rent;
first-class furniture and carpets; one OF the
best little transient houses in city and can be
got at big bargain: $2250.
SO rooms: fine corner; new and elegantly
furnished apartment house; rent $500; price
$500.
Groom and alcove beautiful modern fiat near
Sutter St: all light and sunny; elegantly fur-
nished. with fine upright piano; bargain; S6Oo.
10 rooms: central location; well furnished
good corner; cheap rent; viii be sold for face
of mortgage; $3.50.
30 rooms. new and modern; fine location;
well furnished and paying weli but owner is
obliged to leave city, and to make QUICK sale
reduced to half cost TO furnish for $780,
Large list of exchanges of all kinds always
on hand.
A. CAMERON & CO., 8 EDDY ST.
HAVE you city real estate mortgaged and
cannot sell? II so we can put you into a
paying apartment-house, containing 90
rooms, private bath with each apartment
all rooms light and sunny cheap rent, fur
nished by of the best furniture houses
in S. T.. clears about S400 per month; cali
for particulars at our office. WINSTON &
WOLF, 1926 Market st.
FISHER & CO..- Phone Main 1854
Room 43s James Flood building.
Furnished rocming- houses hotels and flats
The San Francisco call., 1905-08-19
LoDGING-HousEs FOR SALE.
6 Phone South 1880

Eddy St, cor Market and Powell.
Headquarters for Rooming- houses Hotels and
All Kinds of Business Chances.
The San Francisco call., 1905-08-19

IS rooms; fine new brick building; choice
central location newly furnished in best oak
furniture. Administer and velvet carpents; cleo
tric elevator lights ard all modern conven-
lences: beautiful, light and airy halls; in facs
a splendid proposition; can be bought for less
than half cost to furnish: part cash, balance
long time at low interest: price $4,000.
The San Francisco call., 1905-08-19

I.-BEAUTIFULLY FURNISHED.
NEW S1-room house on Ellis ST.
o-Swell marble entrance.
Average monthly profit $115
o.-All ladies of refinement instantly note
6-The superiority Of this house
l.-Ftrst payment $500 in cash.
8-The location is simply the best
e.-The lady owner is anxious to sell,
l0-As she wants a house twice as large.
l.-You can inspect this house by
l2-Going with an agent from
d MARION GRIFFIN'S Office.
A 07o Market St,
.6.- Opposite ''The Emporium"
The San Francisco call., 1905-08-19

Ia SWELL modern apartment house.
2.-103 rooms----------- rooms,
8.-All in splendid Broom apartments.
4.-Full of selected tenants.
6.-Should clear monthly $500 to $3.50.
6.-MUST BE SOLD.
I've will explain to YOU the reason.
s.-You hereby cordially invited
9.-To thoroughly examine the house
I0.-And then make an offer and
Ito suggest terms suitable to you.
GRIFFIN. THE AGENT,
l3.-Will go with you to see II.
a Respectfully,
10 The Owner
le.-P. s.-The rent is only SIS per room
The San Francisco call., 1905-08-19

A rooms; fine corner close in; well fur
nished throughout: always full and pays hand
somely; biggest bargain in city; price $1,000.
The San Francisco call., 1905-08-19
CLAIRVOYANTS.
-A-~~----~>---<- >-~--~-~~--- --~~-s~~--~-~~-~-
PROFESSOR NIBLO.
PROFESSOR NIBLO.
PROFESSOR NIBLO-

Il
PROFESSOR NIBLO.
PROFESSOR NIBLO.
PROFESSOR NIBLO.
PROFESSOR NIBLO,
ASTRo-TRANCE CLAIRVOYANT
MY S5 CELEBRATED LIFE READINGS, 81.
/ do hereby solemnly agree and guarantee 10
make you no charge IL 1 fail to call you by
name in full names OF your friends, enemies
or rivals: l promise to tell YOU whether your
husband. wife sweetheart is true or false,
tell you how to gain the love OF the one you
most desire, even though miles away; how to
succeed in business. speculation, lawsuits;
how to marry the OF your choice; how to
regain youth, health and vitality; removes
evil influences, cures drink habit; locates
treasures cures all nervous diseases
How can I have good luck?
How 1 succeed in business?
How can make my home happy?
How can l marry the one choose!
How soon can / marry?
How can l make any one love met
How soon will my lover propose?
How can l get good position?
How can I control any one?
How can hold my husbands s iove'
HoTRs GR can 10 Fo nSeP ny BALY Ml!s RNp SUNDAY
ala ELLIS ST. NEAR JONES ST;
PROFESSOR NIBLO.
PROFESSOR NiBLo.
AAA-The Great, Only and Original
PRINCESS EUGENIA.
Dead Trance Medium.
Trance Clairvoyant.
Born with a Double Veil.
Educated in Occult in Egypt and India.
s5 Complete Life Readings. 81.
Tells your name-Tells you when and whom
you will marry.
Settles love quarrels and promptly re-
unites the separated. no matter how long
standing.
Advises in regard to speculation in real
estate, mining and minerals-locates mines
lost and stolen articles
Removes evil influences and gives you
power to control the one you love.
London's most famous palrnist and clair
voyant; is acknowledged by press and pub
lie the greatest living dead trance medium
She tells you what you came for before
you utter a word does not ask questions,
no matter what your trouble may be.
Call and she will guide you with GER
tainty higher than human power. Tells
you the truth, good or bad
Write her II you can't call. Six questions
answered by mail. 81. Send date birth. lock
hair.
Hours-10 to daily and Sunday.
Private; no sign; ring bell 40i-Eddy st-4O4
The San Francisco call., 1905-08-19

big bargain; $1,000 az CASH takes
ga 80-room. Centrally located house.
B.-Bankable profit $500 monthly
f.-Electric elevator and electric lights.
e. $40 Market st. opp Emporium"
The San Francisco call., 1905-08-19

20 rooms: new modern buildings; new ana
elegantly furnished; frst-class downtown 10
cation; cheap rent with lease; most complete
mousse OF Its Size in city; call for particulars
The San Francisco call., 1905-08-19
Roomine-Hou.e. and Hotel. for Sale.

L.
a.
ss.-MARIoN GRIFFIN.
g.
e. MARION GRIFFIN.
T.
s.
g. MARION GRIFFIN.
o.
L.
2-970 = Market St-room-SQ1 - Eighth
3-hoor James-Flood-Bu ilding-opposite
l4-The - Emporium. Phone Maln-9oto;
5.-Modern Business-Methods.- -ROOMlNG
6-and = APARTMENT-H T-Houses--Absiract
diminished All = titles = guaranteed.
lS- Our Ellis St = Entrance = Is
81 -Opposite- ,rr,r
.0-THE - GOLDEN = WESI-HOl Ill
IL TAKE = THE = ELEVATOR
The San Francisco call., 1905-08-19

1.-swELL. RESPECTABLE. homelike
2.-10-room house.
3.-Located near Pine and Hyde.
4-Price $780,
(Which is about half the value.
6.-Rent $40; very cheap for such a house.
7.-Proflt S35 over all expenses.
s. MARION GRIFFIN
g. -070 Market St
o. Opposite 'The Emporum."-
The San Francisco call., 1905-08-19

THE - CALL
JOHN D. sPREOKELs. :. Proprietor
Address Communications TO
JOHN McNAUGHT. ....... Manager
W. j. MARTIN. Business Manager
TELEPHONE.
Ask for TIE CALL The Operator VIII Con-
meet You With the Department You Wish
Publication office. Market and Third, s F.
Editorial Rooms. .2l7 TO 22l Stevenson St
Delivered by Carriers. 20 Cts. Per Week, rs
Cts. Per Month. Single Copies Cts
Terms by Mail, Including Postage Cash With
Order):
DAILY CALL dnclud. sunday year. IS 90
DAILY CALL (inclu6. Sunday, mos f. 90
DAILY CALL-By Single Month. 75e
SUNDAY CALL 1 Yeer...--......---.- Z-oV
WEEKLY CALL. 1 Year......,........; I: 90
FOREIGN pa3jy S3 Fer Fer year year f1tTs E1tTs
POSTAGE Weekly !. 90 Per Year Extra
ALI, POsTAfAsTBRs ARB AUTHORIZED
TO RECEIVE SUBSCRIPTIONS.
Sample Copies viii be forwarded when re-
Mall subsc-4bers IN ordering change Of "a.
@ 5 ts2d of Rs g RTsgin IN % orlsr EyS 70 PEN n.as
Quest
OAKLAND oFFTcBI
Io1e Broadway. .TsleDhons Main loss
ALAMEDA oFTTcEi
s&s5 PErk Street, Near Santa Clara AvsnuA.
Phone Alameda b5e.
BERKELEY OFFICE:
R1Es Center Street. Telephone North n
WASHINGTON coRREsPoNDBNTi
JAMES S. TYLER. Post Building
NEW YORK NEWS STANDS
waloorf-Astoria Hotel; A Brentano. 81
Union Square Murray Hili Hotsl: Flfth-avenuS
Hotel and Hoffman House.
CHICAGO NEWS STANDS:
- sherman 1,5eg House, P O. New. Co; Great
Hotel: Palmer House.
CHICAGO REPREsENTATIvB
c. GEORGE KRoGNESs. Marquette Building
Oong Distance Telephone, Central 26ls.'D
NEW YORK REPRESENTATIVE
STEPHEN 3. SMITH. 90. 80 Tribune Building
NEW YORK CORRESPONDENT:
c c. CARLTON. N........-...... Herald Square
BUSINESS OFFICE Of the San Francisco Call,
corner Market and Third streets: open until
y o'clock every night in the year:
BRANCH OFFICES:
zoos Market street, opposite Fifth; open until
II o. N.
bvp montgomery ave. open until ?. m.
200 Hayes street; open until $3.50 D. N.
60 McAilste- street; open until $3.50 ?. NJ
6lJ Larzin street, open until 80 p. m.
1881 Mission street: open until 10 p
JOG Eleventh street: open until p. m
1l5C valencia street; open until p m.
Northeast corner Church and Duncan streets;
open until 2 N.
geo Eil-more street; open until Q ?. m.
TO SUBSCRIBERS LEAVING TOWN
FOR THE SUMMER.
CALL subscribers contemplating a
change of residence during the summer
montls can hnNe their naper forRnrded
The San Francisco call., 1905-08-19

20 rooms; new. modern. downtown house :
cheap rent. long lease; well furnished; FIRST
class condition: choice location and clears over
SZoO per month"; to be sold at big bargain
The San Francisco call., 1905-08-19
TO SUBSCRIBERS LEAVING TOWN
FOR THE SUMNER.

CALL subscribers contemplating a
change of residence during the summer
months can have their paper forwarded
by mail 10 their new address by notify
ing THE CALL Business Ofice. This
paper viii also be on sale at all summer
resorts and is represented by local
agent in all towns on the coast.
The San Francisco call., 1905-08-19

"a rooms. beautiful little apartment house;
choice location: cheap rent; elegantly fur-
nished: and rooms each; new, modern In
every particular; i'll health cause Of SALE
The San Francisco call., 1905-08-19

j.
:.
1.-A-4S-roum-corne
For the nominal price OF $26OO.
8.-Terms $1,000 down and installments
4.-Laid out mostly in apartments.
o.-Landlady takes OF ten rooms
6.-Bankable profit $3.50 each month.
7.-t,urnishings cost $4,000.
6.-Located in the residential district.
e--For sale. of course. by
10 MARION GRIFFIN.
IL The Agent,
12- $40 Market st., room sol,
13.- Opposite THE Emporium"
a. Ellis ST. entrance is
ID Opposite Golden West Hotel.
g.
T.
1.-sUTTER- ST BARGAINS
2.-14 rooms; rent $50; price t400
8.-Terms u cash and installments
4.-1ts sunny corner house.
g. -Also-
6.-3s rooms: cost S6O10 in cash.
1.-Owner crippled in hospital.
S.-Lease, with rent per room------S5
9.-Price put down to----$2O
10.-Highly respectable.
11.-Terms u cash if desired.
12.-Properly managed, should ciear--$1oO
1S.-Each month above all expenses.
IA Also
1870 rooms a splendid sunny
16.-Corner and clearing $3.50 monthly.
l7.-An the bargains for sale by
16.- MARION GRIFFIN,
10 Room SOL James Flood Building.
20 CI1ie finest office building In the cty.)
The San Francisco call., 1905-08-19
MEETING NOTICES.

MARS Lodge No. 202, K. Of P. meets 90
tonight in Pythan Hall, go Golden So
Gate ave. Visitors welcome. Xxx
CHAS NAGELE. c. C ~
Fl. ?. ADAMS, K. of r. and S. >
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01
A DISPLAY OF GRIT.
How a Plucky Soldier Succeeded in
Bringing In Two Confeder-
ate Prisoners.

During the campaign of 1864 and
while the division was on the march
Color-Guard John Boyce. company b.
discovered a mounted confederate in
q wood, some distance from the road
who was intently watching our com
mand passing. says the National Trib-
une. Making a detour. Boyce came
upon the Johnny from the rear and
promptly captured him After disarm-
ing his prisoner. Boyce started for
brigade headquarters. in order 10 turn
over his prisoner TO the provost mar
shall. The headquarters being some
distance in the rear BOyce counter
marched in the woods. and while so
doing saw another mounted confed-
crate approaching. The latter suppos-
ing that BOyce was the prisoner. ad-
vanced all smiling. and without any
preparation for fight When sufficient
ly near Boyce pointed his revolver at
his head and demanded his surrender.
The Johnny was dumfounded. and
Boyce having him at a DISADVANTAGE
he surrendered, but continued swear
ing at his ill-luck. until Boyce turned
him and his companion over to the
provost
Comrade Boyce is a retired manufac-
turer of Pittsburg. Pa. He was early
appointed color-guard. and in the bat
tle OF ST. Mary's Church. Virginia,
June "a. 1864. carried the flag in the
thickest of the fight The regiment
lost 81 men in killed. wounded and
missing in this engagement Among
the former was our beloved colonel.
George n. Covode who fell pierced by
four bullets Comrade Boyce was Sc
verely wounded in the battle OF An
tietam. where we lost that peerless Of
Childs
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01

MOTHER, CAN I cor

"a letter written hy young man to his
mother asklng permission 10 enlist. IL was
written 81 February lSee)
am wil-4es 81. NeJ. nls.f.cr knc VII < well
49, what you viii say,
" hef you .ta- vsti .earfu. r. ndress what
VII e 80 A.1 tC-cuY
NnoN'is N..i &c n..ne u asdcr on loya.
iroahci's iart
That Will k.no.e. with each Impulse with
each thte1U4Ls ~ your heart
! have heard ms cour Try ealing for het
sons TIA; SSH. 81. true.
nave loved tnat country. mother. next tC
Coo ard YOU.
And my SOU Is spring!ug forward 20 resist
Can ] 80 my dearest mother? Tel. me
mother. can go.
From the battered walls o. Sumter. from
The Wild waves az .Ee sea
! have heard lcr cry Tor sGccor. as The
voice 90 Soo 20 nc.
In presuor.ty , loved ner--in her DAYS Of
dark distress.
with your siitlt IN me. mother. could
love ttat country JESSE
They have plelcto Ter heart with treason.
thcN have caused Ter sons 10 bleed
They have roboe- her o. hey kindness. they
nave tr.umIlC- 81 her need.
They have tamr.e0 on Ter Standard. and
she calls uc in her woe:
Can I go. my dearest motncr2 Tell me.
mother. can SOP
i am young and slender. mother-they
would cali ne yet Toy.
But know The and live lu. and the bless
iurs enjoy.
/ an old enough. my mother. 10 he loyal.
proud and true
To the faiihfu. s-rss OF duty I have ever
learned from you.
We must conquer this rebellion. let The
doubling heart bc stii:
We must conquer 10 or perish. We must
conquer and We Viii.
But the faithful. must RIOS "a ter. and shall
J be wanting So
BIG me 80. my dearest mother. tell me.
mother. can go2
lie Who led His chosen people In their ef-
fort 70 be- free
From tho tyranny 81 EE, ~ Will be morciful
60 me.
VIII protect me by Ills power whatsoe'er
undertake
VIII return me home in safety. dearest
mother Tor your sake
or should This. my bleeding country. need
a victim such as me.
am nothing more than others who have
persisted TO be free.
On her bosom ict me slumhcr. on her altar
Jet me Tie.
] am not afraid my mother Ia 50 good a
cause 90 Gle.
There will come day OF gladncss. when
the people OF the Lord
Shall look proudly on their banner which
His mercy has restored.
When the stars. lu perfect number. on
their azure field 81 blue
Ehall be clustered in union. then and
ever firm and true
] may live 90 see it. mother. when the pa
triots work Is dorc
And your heart, 40 fun ~ kindness. win
beat proudly for your son.
Or through tears your eyes may see it with
sadly thoughtful view.
And may love IL stu more dearly for the
cost IL won from you
i have written 90 YOU. mother. With con-
seriousness Of right;
] ar thinking ~ you fordiy with a loyal
heart tonight:
When l have your noble bidding. which
shall tell me TO press on.
will come and kiss YOU. mother. come and
kiss YOU and be gone
In the sacred name OF Freedom and my
country as her due.
In the name OF law and justice I have
written this 70 you
j am eager, anxious. longing TO resist my
country's foe
Shall / 20 my dearest mother? Te! me
mother. shall 90?
From a "Loyai Woman's" Scrap Book.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01

But you have no income. = protested
the stern parenT. If you marry my
daughter you will have to live on
wind"
Thank you. sir" rejoined the bright
young man. Then ! may count on
you TO raise the wind. eh?"-Cincin-
uati Enquirer.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01

Mother understand that young
man is 70 call again this evening
Ethel-Of course; we're engaged.
What, Didn't tell you not to give
him any encouragement at alp"
Yes, mother. but ne didn't need
any encouragement CasselTs
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01
All N6nsensical.

Stern Father don't believe that
young man loves you as much as he
says
Ernie-But. pa. he writes such SEN
sible love letters
Stern Father-Well. a trae lover
never did write seaside love letters
Chicago News
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01
Els Real Sin

Harry, how dare you take my hand?
rs ii so serious an offence, Emma?
Remember. ! have Leen coming TO see
you for two years-and this is the first
time!"
Two whole years? And this is your
first attempt? Harry. il is unpardona-
bic. Royal Magazine.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01
Made Them Jumn.

Gunner-Harker has an original way
of making progress through the crowds
in the shopping district.
Guyer-What is it-
Gunner-Why, he carries an automo-
bile horn under his coat and when he
toots il everyone jumps out of his way
for ten feet ahead.-Atlanta Constitu-
ton.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01
Not 10 BE Trnsted

Grandma-And did you get a letter
from your husband this morning?
Young Wiie-No; expected one, but
the carrier tells me the mails have been
very Irregular for the past week.
Grandma-Past week. fddlesticks'
They've always been that way. You
can't trust one OF EN- out OF your sight.
Cincinnati ENQUIRER.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01
Then She Was Mad

Maiden Lady-It is very good of you.
sir. TO give me your seat.
Pat O'Brady-Not at all, mum. It's
a dooty we owe TO the sex. Some
folks only do il when a woman is
young and pretty: but / says the sex.
Pat, and not the individual.-Tit-Bit
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01
The Truthful Doctor

Doctor" said a fashionable belle.
what do you think of tight-lacing?'
The doctor solemnly replied: Madam.
all can say is. that the more a woman's
waist is shaped like an hour-glass the
sooner viii her sands of life run out -
Tit-Bits
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01
ontsi6e the Prize Ring

De Long-Are YOU making any prog
ress with your suit for Miss Coldcash' 5
hand?
Shortley-I should say not got itin
the solar pleNus long ago
De Long-lndeed, She handled you
without gloves. did she?
Shortley- suppose SO; but / got
The mitten, just the Cincinnati
Enquirer.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01
Spontaneous.

Ernie--How did your college choose
such sn extraordinary yell?
MyrtiIla-Why. IL was conceived by
one Of oar members who found a metal
lie mouse in her stocking Christmas
morning-Chicago News.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01

Jupp-Why are Mahometan soldiers
always so recklessly brave?
Penhecker-Its owing TO their POI
lygamy A man with two or three wives
would have no fear of death.-Ally
Sloper
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01
Trouble Enough.

DO YOU favor the whipping post for
wife beaters?"
Goodness gracious no" answered
the timid and unhappy woman. My hus-
band is cross enough now, without bav-
ing anything mere 70 irritate him. -
Washington Star.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01

Most actors" remarked the talka-
tive bOarder. seen TO think they can I
get too far front on the bill board"
Yes" interrupted Mrs. Starven.
quite unlike some other people who be-
lieve they can't get too FAR back on the
board bill. philadelphia Press.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01

since you got that expensive COOK"
Yes; ten or a Cozen. She smashes
Just as many as the old one did. -
CLEVELAND Leader.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01

Il see Millions mas been buying more
real estate"
Il didn't know IT,"
Yes; he toio me this morning that he
was on his way 10 instruct his lawyers
TO examine title for him"
oh. that's not real estate; he's nego-
uating for duke tor his daughter
Houston Post
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01
Roc Much Of a Good inning.

First Actor thought your next tour
was TO have been through South Africa.
Second Actor-it was. but the COM
pany struck. One OF them had read that
an ostrich egg often weighs two or
three pounds Royal Magazine.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01
A Pertinent INQUIRY.

My ledger" said the grocer who was
trying 20 sell Out. shows that | did a
business OF SOC. 600 last year"
oh ] don't doubt shat rejoined the
prospective purchaser. But what does
your cashbook show Cincinnati En-
Quirer.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01
Sooner Broken the Better.

THAT drum" said the salesman in
the toy store is very strong. 1t will
last for years"
"Oh. mercy," said the fatherly-look-
ing man; Il don't want one as strong as
that,"-Yonkers Statesman.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01
Between Friends.

Joe-You look out Of sorts this morn
ting, old man; what's wrong?
Fred-Oh. family troubles.
Joe-Well. I'm sorry 10 hear that
Nothing serious. I hope2
Fred-Im afraid il Is. had a misun-
Outstanding VITA my rich uncle last
night
JOe-lndeed, Did YOU lose the ticket ?
Cincinnati Enquirer.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01
Just a Slap.

Miss Anteek-Yes. we're engaged.
Some people are mean enough TO say he's
too young for me-
Miss Pert-Ridiculous.
Miss Auteek-lt is so. isn't it?
Miss Pert-Sure, He'll age fast
enough after he's married 10 you.-Phil-
adelphia Press.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01

Don't you think that an abundant
display OF diamonds is vugar?"
No" answered Mrs. Cum-ox, 81
don't think so. But that's what used
to say when | didn't have any
Washington Star
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01
Optimistic Thought.

All" sighed the girl with the beauty
column countenance my mirror tells
me sorry things"
do not be cast down" advised the
cheerful friend. Remember. every mir
ror has a silver lining. Judge.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01
Almost a Giveawau-

"A New York man advocates the
drowning OF all idiots"
why, the cruel brutel | shall raise
my voice In protest, I-er-oh. well,
II doesn't matter 10 me. Houston Post.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-04-01
Accommodating.

81 say, Cashey. can you let me have
, FIVE dollars for week."
Eyes. Just take 1t out Of the $40 you
owe me. and keep il for another week"
Kansas City Star.