Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1905-03-04

thing. but they whistle until your mind is
distracted and your nerves are unstrung.
These street car whstlers should be placed
in the category of common nuisances and
law
x * x
Indignation was written on the counten-
ance of a. former member of the crack
Washington military company. the Ma
tional Rifles, several days ago, at sight
he beheld at 18th street and Pennsylvania
avenue. 1t was high noon, and the big
black time ball over the State, War and
Navy building having dropped to the base
of the supporting staff, the government
clerks were pouring forth from the build
ing like bees from some great hive.
Standing on the corner at attention
was a colored man who was so black, as
passerby expressed it, that charcoal would
have made a white mark on his face This
Afro-American was clad in the full dress
uniform of the late National Rifles-bear-
skin shake, scarlet coat and blue trousers
which had. perhaps. been discarded by
former member of the fashionable military
company. The gaunt colored grenadler
held aloft a transparency. on which was
painted in large and gaudy letters, buy
Smithkins Smile Producers. for the Young
and Old or something of that sort
L 1
rif1eman, who would have thought that
the dainty. picturesque uniform of our
company. which has figured in SO many
fashionable functions and on so many
great occasions and parades, should have
descended to such base uses as to be en-
ployed on a human sandwich. colored ad-
vertising dodge to attract attention TO some
patent medicine or the like.
1.-THE next thing we know, concluded the
angry soldier they'll be buying up our
discarded uniforms and degrading them. as
the blue suits of the regular soldiers are
being beittled by being worn as distinctive
formatory where criminals are incarcer-
ated.''
X X X
The tendency of some democrats to vote
mo" on general principles was illustrated
in the Senate a few days ago. A call OF
the Senate had been ordered and at the
conclusion of the call of the roll Senator
Money of Mississippi came into the cham
ber The clerk on seeing him called:
Mr.. Money!"
NO" responded the senator from Mis-
sissippi, apparently supposing vote was
being taken on republican amendment to
the bill that had been pending. A general
laugh at Mr.. Moneys expense then follow
ed, when he was told that they were not
voting on amendments, but were merely
getting quorum.
A demure little man who numbers tobacco
chewing among his few bad habits claims
that he got tie best of an argument with
a policeman last week when the pavements
were covered with a thick crust of snow
and ice. The little man abstractedly spat
upon the thick snow on G street. police
man who was looking for case stepped
up to him and said, rather huskily:
Look here, don't you know the law?"
What law" queried the small man,
startled from his revery.
why, the expectoration act. 1t costs IS
in this city to expectorate on the sidewalk,
and you have violated the act"
Howe"
by expectoratng on the sidewalk of
course"
DO you see any sidewalk hereabouts? %
asked the little fellow aggravatngly. IF
you do your eyesight is miraculous and you
can not only see through a brick wall where
there isn't any hole, but you ought to be
able to see very far into the future. If you
can see any trace of sidewalk where 1 spat
just now your eyes microscopic and
telescope and you can no doubt men
and animals and trees and the like on the
planet Mars. No sir I did not expecto-
rate on the sidewalk for it is covered by
four inches of solid freeze. 1 spat on the
snow, and the act you mention makes no
reference about expectorating on the frozen
pile that covers the sidewalk and has COW
cred 1t for more than a month. There is
no sidewalk in sight, mister policeman, to
expectorate on
X X X X
1--WE could turn out with 100 uniformed
men in the inauguration parade said a
member of the Col John Jacob Aston
Camp of Spanish War Veterans, ''but ow-
ing to General Chaffee's recent marching
order We will only have about fifty men
in line
How is that?" asked a comrade of an
other camp.
''Well. you see. General Chaffee has de-
clared that all pardders on March must
step 100 to the minute, which means pretty
lively hiking Now all the members of
Astor Camp were regular soldiers in the
war with Spain, and all were disabled and
rendered unfit for further active service,
else they would not be admitted to the
Washington Soldiers Home. Some were
knocked out by mauser missiles or Spanish
shrapnel. and others by tropical diseases,
and walking fast is an impossibility with
some of them. Hence they cannot keep
up with General Chaffee's 120 per. But If
he will give our disabled ones horses, or
even mules we will make showing. and
the Presidents bodyguard of Rough
Riders will not discount us very much
eli bar