The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1905-07-29

Ter. Gladys-Well. l like her cheek! Il
iracye--so did George $
a
Don't know her? Why, she lives
n the same square with you" Yes, =
but she's not In the same CIRCLE I,
Cleveland Leader.
Miss Pert-Which half is It that
doesn't know how the other half lives? 7
Miss Caustlque-The better half
Philadelphia Record
Judge-I'll give you thirty days in I
jail. Prisoner-Goodl Ny wife will
be through cleaning house when get
out.-Kansas City Times.
Brother-You can't think how nery-
GUS was when l proposed. Sister
You can't think how nervous she was
until you did.-Town and Country.
Jack-why do you girls spend so
much time and money on dress? Nell
(candidly)-To interest the men and
worry other girls.-Philadelphia Press.
what reason does he give for not
paying his wife alimony?" HE says
that marriage is a lottery, and hence
alimony is a gambling debt"-Collier's
Weekly.
You say you are not afraid Of the
trustsT" Not Bit" answered SEN
ator Sorghum; some of 'em have been
the best friends | ever had."-Wash-
Ington Star.
She-Freddie and Clara are engaged,
but they have decided to keep their
engagement a secret. Clara told me
so. He-Yes, 1 know. Freddie told
me.-Pick-Me-Up.
waiter, these are mighty small
oysters" "Yes, SIR" "And they don't
appeal to be very fresh. either" Then
it's lucky they're small, amt it, sirY-
Cleveland Leader.
Nell-Mr. Kammerer is so kind He
said l took very pretty and very
artistic picture. Belle-Indeed? And
whose picture did you take, dear?-
Philadelphia Ledger.
Don't you ever go to school. Jim
mie?" "Well, yer see, it's dis way,
kid-ma gives me a nickel a week ter
) 20 to school an de teacher gives me a
dime ter stay away.-Judge.
she-I have new milllner, Jack.
Don't you think my hats are more be-
5 coming than they used to be? He
S Yes; and your bills are becoming more
than they used to be.-New York Mail
]. "Charles, have you ever considered
going into any businessT Nav. The
governor wanted me to last yeah, bu
: told him, dontcherknow. 1t was
e enough to have one tradesman in thu
Il family. PUCK.
= The Boss-I'm afraid you are no
- qualified for the position; you don
know anything about my business
t, The Applicant-Don't l, thought
keep company with your typewriter
Chicago Journal.
-, Stage manager interviewing chi
IL dren with the idea of engaging theI
= for a new play)-Has this child bee
ie on the stage? Proud mother-N'
IL but he's been on an inquest, and b
80 speaks up fine.-Punch.
III Physician docking into his anterior
Vi where a number of his patients al
re vaiting)-Who has been waiting II
As longestT" Tailor-(who has called
es present his bilD-I have, doctor; d
g liyered the clothes to you three yea
ne ago.-Glasgow Evening Times.
Mrs. Brlckrow-How do you ma
90 age TO persuade your husband to Dl
~ YOU such expensive bonnetsf MI
Of Tophatte-I take him shopping WI
me walk him around until he cal
-. stand and then wind up in bonn
~ store He'll buy anything to get hon
&C. New York Weekly.
ha Lecturer on the French Revolution
on II is impossible to imagine the cha
- that relgned-confusion and anarc
everywhere. In our more peaceful &C
dit,ons we cannot even imagine su
a state Of things. Man at the back
-, tbe hall-Yes, we can, mister. Co
~ M to our house; we're movin'.-Pi
Me-Up.
=. Yes" said he, letting ner OUT
u otber notch beyond the speed lin
'as ntbe automobile has come to sta
leu Tben the machine slowed down, CAV
.budder or two and a dry, rasp
cough. and stopped. You were rigi
ma said his guest few hours later
ain. thew trudged YEARLY into FOWL
ira Houston Post.
urs. A Western paper tells Of confu
to clerk who, asked by young lazy
ust. certain number of yards Of mus
UNI. Looked at the cloth for minute, me
are while fumbling for the end. Fin
and ha said disgustedly, "Dick must b
asts sold both ends of this: yes, I'm
heir no d,d.p And with that he pus
tout his shears across the piece ana I
to tha end thus made sold the guam
for desired.
on's one day in a crowded street
pohb, Hirsch, Of Chicago, got III
Give his seat to a woman. NJ
ia the Jewish dlvine's disgust a yo
said man scrambled into it before the
lage could take It. For some moments
is rabbi glared at the offender In sil'
d as FINALLY the rude young man, gro'
hese restless. said: "Wot are you sta
new at me fort You look as II you
the Ike to eat mew I'm forbidden
ex- tbat" answered Hirsch. I'm J
mes Fly
ma, - -
dam. NorioiA ,...a-- ~ ,bo