The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-06-04

windy spring season, he quite overlook e.
| The fact that there Is as much Skin
| reo,,ired in the proper selection OF the
| famous trop-sti as there Is III buyinS
| n !, pood horse or knowing setter dog.
| On foo. all open work looks alike 70
| hin in the windows of the dry-s ooos
| stores, Mind, you we are d'scuss.ns
bachelors now--those unsoph1sticateog an
| imnls who sometimes have as many as
4 two wardrobes for their own a l, t.l.u
| dozens Of clothes hooks on lhelr WY IVY.
| for everyday apparel
| Rut when n mans married he learns
| so much and pays so high for MS Know w,
| edpe Yet re never quite understands
n nil md isn't, prcsumptuous enough
10 try to understand 1t all. And to me
last. he likes for the lady OF his cho!ce
to appear we'll In public, But now ne
begins In vague, quantltatlVe way, ~
distinguish between cause ana eliec'.
When he strides chestily down me STA. .,ao
of a Sabbath and feels sense OF priue
IN the rustllng bundle of elegant ieml-
ninc finery at his side, he couldns LOT
tho life of him tell Just why she looks
so stunning, but he knows one thlps-
1t took time and space to do II. nc
knows that the details Of the woman >
makeup IRE lcgion-that she Is con
Elomerate mass OF pins, beads, buttons
detachable collars, prison-like pasques'
skirts, lingerie, etc, etc, etc. w. -
None bit the married arc SUPPOSED 70
Intornret the .'and so forths' II he and
the woman he adores are on perfectly
on,,able terms she will call on him 70
,fasten her up In the back"--that IS,
to clamp the hooks and eyes when SOME
how have superseded buttons NO maze
creature, married, single or about to- be
married. can incarccrate a woman IN q
BASQUE Tor whatever she calls ~ by iast,
ening her hooks and -eyes without tnrill
If horror. The husband feels that III
so doing he making his wife prisoner prs ,.,r
that once traight-jacketed IN TINS
fashion. there Is no escape for ner. Come
veal or VOC, she who suffers herself 20
ho shackled with hooks-and- eyes Is sar-
torially in,mured There is no breaking
out without the Intervention OF third
party. Imagine, man. how you would
feel shut up in q Jacket like mud
turtle or an armadillo. You would gro"
far more desperate than the Yankee IN
King Arthgr's court, the man VINO haa
to get blacksmith to remove him from
his coat OF mail.
But the feminine self-torturing process
stoppcth not with bodily mprisonm ent.
Last Of nll comes the Insertion Of the
pretty head into the botanical exhibit
which has Just come from the milliner,s.
After the outrageous ornament has been
pulled. jerked, twisted, patted, and ad-a
justed before q mirror. she who Is bank
rupting you with her personal appearance,
draws forth blade Of glltterlng steel,
and seemingly seeks her quictus to make
! with a bare bodkin, to wit, hatpin,
which Is plunged reckessly into her
fair scalp. Your blood congeals at the
sight o: this deadly thrust but It never
results fatally and is a signal for march,
| ing orders-that Is after the woman
| remembers that she has forgotten her
| handkerchief and goes back to remind
the cook not to overlook the dressing for
the lettuce. When the start-thc bona
| fide start. we mean, for the woman
always goes back to the house three or
| four times on some little errand---is made,
| the prisoner OF the hooks and-eyes scuds
| lightly down the street, looking rs placid,
| as comfortable and as well suited to her
clothes as bird OF paradise In Its gorge
Gus plumage. I'D
You, on the other hand. are as thor
ouEhly uncomfortable us gaily capari-
soned hod carrier at the court Of st.
James The new high hat you have
| Just bought Is too large and falls down
to your ears, your cravat rides over
your collar behind and reveals the col
lar button in front. Your coat rucks
up "n the back. while you realize with
a sickening sense OF shame that your