New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1905-03-15
life.

A new railway track layer, with a crew OF forty
men will lay two miles OF track day. according
to The Indianapolis News" The track layer has
a huge crane sixty feet long which projects for
ward over the road and hauls behind it train of
sixteen fat cars loaded with ties and rails. A con-
tinuous double line of cars moves constantly over
rollers and carries the tie with it. Both rails and
ties are seized at the proper time by the machinery
and placed on the road in front of the train where
they shortly form part of the track over which 1t
passes. This device is said to be the most ex-
peditious as well as economical track layer in the
world.
In Glass House-Tom-"Didn' Grace's father
call you down for staying SO late?"
ing; he was just coming in I was going out -
Detroit Free Press.
Menominee, Mich. being sighted by Cupid.
The young PERSONS of the northern peninsula of
Michigan were either not marrying or. at any rate
not at Menominee. Justice Vanden Berg set about
correcting this neglect. This advertisement has
been running IN the Menominee papers for several
weeks:
Justice vanden Berg will hereafter give trading
stamps with every marriage certificate"
The justice is doing u business like a de-
partment store on bargain Mondays
Now" began the moralzer. take the life Of
your neighbor, for instance. He
I'D do il in a minute " interrupted the democrat
izer 'if the law would tolerate IL. He's learning
to play the cornet"-(Chicago News.
Her nurse had fallen asleep and a four-year-old
girl todded to the pulpit steps in a Birmingham
church and temporarily stopped the sermon by
asking the clergyman Please man. why do Won
get up there? Why don't you come DOWN. When
a church warden gently led her back to her seat
amid the tittering of the congregation she repeated
her question adding: Can ne see better?''
Housecleaning Tfme.-Mrs. Jobson-Some man
has invented q yacht that does its own lacking.
Mr.. Jooson--I wish he d get busy and invent a
patch. -''''
The following problem is said to have demoralized
the railroad service OF large part of West vir-
ginla all the employees being so absorbed in
working il out: "A train mile long starts from
the station at Glady The engine leaves the sta
ton and the conductor waits until the caboose
comes, when nc jumps on the caboose and walks
forward over the train. When the engine reaches
the next station. Oxley, four miles distant from
Glady, the conductor steps of the engine How far
does the conductor ride and how far does he
waIk?"
Towne-I should say ii doea-it's drawn most 81
''weel John how are you to-day?' asked a
Scottish minister. on meeting one Of his parishion
ers according TO The Buffalo Commercial
.'Gey. weel. sir; gey weel.' replied John eau
tic sly gin it wasna for the rheumatism in the
RIGHT leg"
"Ah. John. be thankful. for there is no mistake
you are getting cd. like the rest OF us and old
age doesn't come alone"
Aud age, sir" returned John II wonder 10
hear ye Aud age has naething tae dae WIT
Here's my ither leg list aud; an it's soond and
soaple yet"
At the Sewing circle.-"Nien and women are the
hooks and eyes Of society, remarked Miss Smith.
and they are constantly becoming unfastened."
eiRl Tribune.