The news & observer., 1905-12-17

loike on a pile iv rocks whole yure
team disappears round tn curve, lawn
ye sittin tin mOiles from home feelin
tn place ye set on an murmhern' to
yuresilf 'Nothin's SO bad thot cudnt
be wurrse.'
"Begorra," said Mr.. Hennessy, IAN
| it's aisy-loike. Oh thought it was phat
We got out iv books"
''Dvil n bit iv it," said Mr. Dooley.
"Phat ye fOind in tn books iV philo-
sophers is tn same ye foind in tn road
win ye hit tn rocks. Ye wade through
a frishet iv haythin wurrds an whin
ye come out on tn other bank all iv
it runs off iv ye loike wather, an ye
say, It's all fr tn bist, happy in tn
| oldea thot it culdnt hev been amy
wurrse. Wasn't Oh took to philosophy
in books. It was fOine an iXillera-
tn, Hennessy, an Oi enjoyed it as
much as beer. Oh read fure sintences
as long as tn Mississippi river an its
tributaries an this is phat Oi got:
THE eternal not Ourselves thOt makes
f'r Righteousness is tA' somewhat an
cometn from afar trailing clouds iv
glory i'm tn abstract until all tn cat
| egories is inclusive iV tn oldeal an
tn universas deduce from a horse
thot it's a cow as is proven be tn con-
crete oideas preVailin' in tn molnd lV
matter an If ye butt yure head agln
tree it doesn't hurt f'r tn tree amt
there"
"Shure an what did it mane?" said
MI HennCsSy.
1T manes," said Mr.. Dooley, "thot
if We hev sense enough TO shtand up
shtraight an look tn Wurrld in tn
face loikc a mon an talk United
States an look III Wurrld in tn face
ye ar-re tn nobIist wulrk iV God. Oi
heV a dom poor opinion, Hennessy, iV
/ these ,rofis.l ires thot murdher tn
mither tongue till ye can hear tn
poor thing chryin' f'r tn pllcemln
Loife is not SO long as it's short an
Oh f'r wan VIII take me mug iv beer
an tn knowledge thot Oi hev good
digestion, an let yure philosophy as
is in books go to tn diVil be tn Sal
isbury limited Problims niVer did
appeal to me, HennesSy, though Ol
: hev gr-reat rayspect FIR thin as IS
hankerin afther solv.n thin. Tney
hev me sympathy an Oi will vote TN
shtraght ticket fr good goVerhmlh
an again Marion Butler, but further
thin thot Oi puzzle me head not bit
about tn big naked problims ~
human life as she is lived. There
, is nawtnin more in KNOWN Things
thin to know thOt We cant help it whn
fate knocks tn wind out iv we an
makes yc see a light that on tn head.
on land or sea be a blow on tn mead.
Whir fver Oi hear soma wan raVin
about tn gr-reat an unshpeakable
tragedies " loife Oi want to run over
him with a autymobile an tell him to
come I'D shmilin, f'r things amt phat
they seem an livery thing is l + III
good iV his soul, aVen iV his legs is
broke an fure teeth gone out lV MS
mouth down tn ilimintery canal
which wasn't dug be appropriations
from congress. There is nawthin
more saryous IN tn wurrld thin tn
Congressional Record an if ye escape
thOt. though ye be hung, yure lolfe
has been wan grand sweet song an
We shud be able to meet yure pllol
face to face if ye iVer git past tn par,
which OF doubt in yure case, tr ye
niVer passed wan in yure lol1e TIL IN
dispenSary knocked thin out an lnlll
We wint to tn dishpensary. Could IN
wurrld live with Missis Dooley r
week an survive ye wud niVer hear
annymore iv tn whips and scorns iV
tonne nor tn ills We bear rather thin
gallip acrost tn frontier iV tn un-
discovered country to other trials an
tragedies thot ye hevnt been lnthro-
duced to Missis Dooley made me
philosopher, Hennessy, an Oi heV
niver got over it, Oi look out on Tn
wurrld through two Dyes thot ar-re so
used to seein things thot thry men
souls thot tn wurrld gNmmers
smilin meadder, where tn rocks burst
into blossoms an tn inSolence iV OTIS
is as tn Balm iv Gilead to tn poor
diviI phat tn priest left layin' on tn
road to Mandalay. Misses Dooley is
a angel. an she loves me on tn prln-
ciple thot she ought TO chasten me
ach day with loVin' kindness an stove
wood Oh hear men whimperln iolke
whipped ours bacause they thought
Mishter Rollins was backin thin an
found out too late thot he iAdorsed tn
other mon Begorra, an Oh shud
laugh till Oh wept gr-reat stand-polpes
iv tears if Oi he'd nawthin' more thin
thot to worry me. Some ~ me nay
bors grunt and sweat under weary
load iv sorrow an sufferln' bacause
thev lost a hunerd or so on cotton an
Oi cud lose tn wurrld if Oi he'd 1t an
live in a balloon tn rist iV me days
without murmherin. Me married lolfe
has been buchual dhream iv
shtrong- minded females an stove lids.
Oi am case hardened again~phat iver
comes, be day or noight, an whin Oi
git sad, an feel loike tn Wurrld is
hard place to live in, Oi ast Mlssls
Dooley phat tn diVil has she put in
tn bread to make it act so sad. an vi
go out up town to buy a new set iv
table ware with a heart loight an
happy an laughter on me lips. Oi
let nawthin' worrit me at all. at all.
Oh know more about where tn SIM
mon trees do most congregate thin OF
do iv the Presidents message an whin
tn railroad rate matther comes up Oh
git Blum's almanac an pone iv
cracklin' bread till tn discussion is
over. The affairs iv tn wurrld ar-re
unworthy iv me attintion an ol
shtroll down tn poke noddin cherry
gratins to ne troublesome naybors an
rascally fellow citizens. In this lo1te
it is betther to be in mental anguish
all tn tonne thin to heV 1T on tn, IN
shtallmint plan, for Hennessy, there
is a pleasure in pain an thin ye gil
nst to it. TIL sovrin cure FIR all tn
ills iv loife is betther half lolke
M,ssis Dooley fr there isn't tonne 10
be miserable an tn Jumps on yure
head divert yure moind from tn pur-
den an tn mysthery iv all this un.
intelligible wurrld. Shud ve asst me IL
mathrimony was a failure, Oi shua
tell We nay, but courtship is. Git mar
ried, Hennessy me by, an tell all