Elk City mining news. (Elk City, Idaho) 1903-1913, 1905-04-08

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The derrick isn't handsome, but it.
has an uplifting infuence.-Philadel-
phia Record.
New Years: First Resolution-How
are you feeling? Second Resolution
Broke.-Life.
Father (from top of staircase -
Ethel, is that young man gone? Ethel
Awful funny. pa.-Grit.
"Do you think Banks ever fooled his
wife SUCCESSFULLY" Il know it. He
married her."-Detroit Free Press.
what is worse than owing money
you can't pay?" Being owed money
YOU can't collect. "-Cleveland Ledger.
Miss Snowfiake-Whatd did Jim Jack
son git married for? Miss Washtub-
Lawd only knows-he keeps right on
workin' Puck.
She-Do you think that woman
can truly love but once? He-Well,
if that's the only chance she has-yes!
Detroit Free Press.
Papa, will you send me to Europe
to study music?" mo; you can study
it here, and I'll send you to Europe to
practice. "-Houston Post.
Never tell a secret, dear. 1t would
be a great breach of confidence"
what must l do with it. mammaT'
''Well-bring it to mev-Madame.
Father-But do you think you can
make my daughter happy? Suitor-
Happy Say, you should just have
seen her when 1 proposed!-Brooklyn
Life.
Mamma-Don't lounge that way,
Tommy Sit up like man. Tommy
Why, mamma, men sit down; it's only
dogs and rabbits that sit up.-Phila-
delphia Press.
Teaspout-Why are you so angry
with the doctor? Mrs. Teaspout -
When l told him l had terrible tired
feeling he told me to show him my
tongue.-Exchange.
Hoax-They say the sultan of Tur-
key scares his wives nearly to death.
Joax-Yes; I've always heard that he
was a harem-scarem sort of fellow
Philadelphia Record.
Smiggs-There goes a man who has
done much to arouse the people.
Smaggs-Great labor agitator, Ell?
Smiggs-No; manufacturer of alarm
clocks.-Chicago Ledger.
Mrs. Henpeck-This paper says that
married women live longer than single
ones. Mr. Henpeck-Heavens, wom-
an! Can't you think OF something
pleasant to talk about ?-Borrowed.
Freda-He claims to be related to
you, and says he can prove it. Floyd
Related to me? Why that mans a
fool. Freda-Of course, but that may
be mere Observation-Disclosures
Bits.
Mrs. Hayrix-Them air Japs must
be kinder hard up for somethin' tew
read HayriX-Why So, Mandy?, Mrs
Hayrix-This paper says they went
an took a lot Nv Russian magazines
Exchange.
Nervous Old Lady ION seventh fiooi
of hoteD-Do you know what precau
lions the proprietor or the hotel has
taken against fire? Porter-Yes, mum
he has the place inshoored for twice
wot it's worth.-Pittsburg Gazette.
Frenzied Finance: The Farmer Tex
citedly)-Say, Mister Constubble, I've
lest bin bunkered out Nv every durr
cent! The Policeman Grritably)-Well
don't boiler to me, you come-on!
amt no magazine publisher!-Puck.
Mrs. Watkyns-Henry, 1 want dol
lar this morning. Mr.. Watkyns-Grea'
Caesar, womanl DO you think that
am made of money? When you wan
large amounts you ought to let me
know "a hours in advance.-Somer
vile Journal.
Irate Employer-See here, you young
Rip Van Wrinkle, l only hired you yes
terday: and l believe, on my soul
you've been asleep around here eve
since! Sleepy Joe-That's what
though you wished, sir. Here's you
advertisement: "Wanted-An Office
boy, not over IS; must sleep on thu
premises" New Orleans Times-Dem
ocrat.