The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-07-17

Don't you think that some men maks
a mistake in adopting politics as a ca
Eyes. but It isn't as serious as the rzais-
men as its representatives" washington
Star.
Redd-I hear you have just come out
Greene-Yes. that's fact.
spests sgayY dif go R tes
The wife-I expect the new, gin this
morning and you haven't ordered that new
iron bed stead for her room yet.
The Husband-Oh, I wouldn't worry
ing for a new girl before night.-Yonkers
Statesman.
She-Why do they call them safety ra-
He-simply because a mans wife can't
use them to cut her corns with. my pet
Beulah-:I suppose you go to church On
Alma-My dear, when the weather is
too bad to play golf it isn't fit to venture
out at all.-JudEe.
80 he said I was polished gentleman.
'.Well-yes- 1t was the same thing"
.'Ah! What was the exact word?"
He said that you were slippery fel.
low. "-Cleveland Leader.
Hes very wealthy. they say. Has he
got a yacht?"
mo, but he's got a revenue cutter that's
a regular clipper
"a revenue cutter?'
yes: the scissors that he clips his cou-
pons with. "-PhiladeIphia Press.
Your little girl seems to take after he's
'Oh. dear, no! She takes after me. You
ought to see the way she eats pickles!'-
Chicago Record-Herald
Cato was demanding that Carthage be
why not celebrate the Fourth in it?"
Appalled, by the fiendishness of this
scheme, the senate voted to send the ships
instead.-New York Sun.
"Smithers is one of those people whd
manage to shift the blame whenever any-
YES" answered Miss Cayenne, IT OBJ
| serve that he always has to be coaxed I'd
| sing. Star
Now that you have received your di.
plorna,. how do you feel?'' inquired the old
TO tell the TRUTH answered the gradu-
ate, II feel as If the whole bottom had
suddenly dropped out of the earth!'-De-
troit Free Press.
| Patience-The season is approaching
| when men will lie by the cool stream and
fish.
Patrice-rm not so sure about the cool
1
| the statement seems to be all right.-Yon-
| kers Statesman.
81 understand Colonel Jones is a fatal
You're right, thar, stranger! He never
| fails to get his man!'-New Orleans Times
| Democrat.
Mrs. Crabshaw-Tom was awfully scared
| when he saw those four figures on this
Mrs. Crawford-Didn't. he know they
| represented the numbere
Mrs. Crabshaw-No The poor boy
| thought it was the price.-Puck-
The reception was in honor of the pre-
'Mr Jimfries," said the hostess. won't
you show us how you won the champion
I'D like to oblige," responded the great
| fighter, regretfully. but fear you have
| to excuse me this time. I'm very hoarse
tonight. louisville Courier Journa1.
who is that fellow in the stage boz
| who is laughing so heartily"
That's the author Of the opera"
Not at all. He never heard that come
dams jokes before. cleveland Leader.
care prices regulated by supply and de-
| ''Certainly," answered the trust dictator.
by whatever supply we choose to have
| on hand and whatever demand we choose
| to make.s-Washington Star.
| w mere on EARN Qlu you ever learn 10
| spell, young man?' asked the lawyer Of
his clerk, who had been copying some
| documents for him.
My sister taught me, SIR" was the
Wei. I Judge from your spelling that
your sister is no school teacher"
| mo, sir" replied the modest boy, "she' s.
a stenographer ."-Yonkers Statesman.
Mrs. Crawford-Why won't your tus-
band buy you an auto2
Mrs. Crabshaw-He says we can run, in
to debt fast enough now without employ
ing Neutrality-suspicious..
Miss Anteek says this is the most sani-
| tary of all the ages"
t'Shc ought to know" said the man who
| roon1ed across the hall. She's compared
a good many of them."-Detroit Free
/ Press.
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