davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05
Drunken Mans Mistake.

The other night Joplin woman
heard a strange noise that seemed to
come from the sidewalk behind the
kitchen Of her home Raising back
window, she saw her husband and ask
ed, John, why don't you come in the
house?" Pm comm, DEAR" he re-
piled in husky tones, "shoon 2 | kin
get up zese stairsh." He was trying
to climb the wood pile.-Kansas City
Journal
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05
THE USE OF POWDER.
Will Not Harm the Skin IL YOu
Also Use Cold Cream.

VIII Not Harm the Skin IL YOu
Also Use Cold Cream.
A word about using powder. It's all
eight If you clean the face thoroughly
every night with hot water and olive
Gil soap and every afternoon with cold
cream and if always the powder is the
very purest. With these precautions
you can use any amount Of it without
injury and possibly, as the French
beauty doctors insist, with benefit.
Actresses, who use not only powder,
but rouge, grease paint and many 9th
or materials in their various make
ups" are yet famous for retaining the
bloom of youth into middle life and
beyond it, May Irwin, who is the
mother of grown children and yet has
a smooth, pink skin which girl of
sixteen might envy, attributes her ex-
ceptiOnal complexion to the continual
use of cold cream. 1t is the founda-
ton of every makeup" and it is used
with unfailing regularity night after
night. For three or four hours the ac-
tress is sure to have dressing of cold
cream nourishing her complexion and
keeping it fresh and elastic.
The average woman, on the contrary
is apt to dab on her cream one night
and forget it for two, with the result
that her half starved complexion fades
by forty and is parchment at fifty.
Probably she attributes the loss of her
freshness to the powder puff. But the
real trouble was neglect of the cold
cream. Use it plentifully and regular
ly, and powder will do no harm-New
York News.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05
The Beauty Guest.

HLIZABETH has given up her music
and her club;
~ She spends her time between two
tht3gs-her mirror and her 'tub." "
The Cookbook and her new whist rules
are covered thick with dust
FOR Lizzie has brand new fad, and prao-
tice II she mustl
She's going to be the loveliest thing
Alive-if she just lives till springl
She gets up in the morning and brings
Which tells her how TO breathe and loosen
up her diaphragm.
And then she grabs a dumbbell that
weighs an ounce or two
And puts 1t up just eighteen times, as
she has learned to do.
While mother hustles down and makes
The coffee and the batter cakes.
From breakfast time till lunch is served
Elizabeth is found
Before her dressing table with strange In
struments around
With which she works hel cheeks and
lips messages throat and chin
And "rubs the wrinkles out again." in
case some have crept in.
But mother with her dust rag goes
About with smudges on her nose.
The afternoon Elizabeth divides with
Jealous care
Between walk of counted steps and put
ting up her hair;
She reads each day an article about the
beauty quest
And when she yawns lies down to seek
a little well earned rest,
While mother stands on guard to keep
Folks from disturbing Lizzies sleep.
Most of us think that Lizzie's always
been a pretty girl
(Although she had a freckle once and
though her hair won't curb,
But Lizzie's found her mission and when
spring gets here again
She'll be a bowling beauty who will turn
the heads of men.
And mother? She'll be pleased to death
Just to admire Elizabeth!
Jack Appleton in Cincinnati Times
Star.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05
Bargains in Real Estate.

l. Groom house, plastered, lot 50x130
feet, good well, three blocks from
school; pleasant location. Price 5000.
Terms down. VIII trade for other
town property.
2. room house, two lots 50xl30 feet
each, city water; three blocks from
shcool house; pleasant location. Price,
$3.50. Terms $50 down and SIS per
month. A Bargain.
8. Find building lot very cheap if
sold soon.
4. 10 acres good apple and strawberry
land, four acres cleared, l25 fruit trees,
one acre Strawberries, 4-roOm house,
well, stable, wood shed and pack
ing house and chicken house
Price 1920 Terms $50 down and $l5
per month. Will trade for town prop
erty or wild land.
5. Two sections of wheat land; 100
acres under cultivation on each; 500
acres tillable land OF one section, bal
ance fine pasture land, good well small
house, one section fenced. For sale
cheap on easy terms. viii trade for
Hood River property.
g. Is acres good apple land; three
acres hearing orchard, room house,
five.inch paid up water right. For
sale cheap, ur will trade for town prop
erty. viii sell five, ten or the whole
IS acres with small payment down $50,
500 or $3.50, and mon hly or quarterly
payments for balance. Situated near
town.
7. Place your insurance with u.s. We
do not represent the only reliable com
panes in the field to-day, but We do
represent three as gond aud solid com
l.anies az are d"ing bushes.
Hood River
Real Estate 6 Exchange Co.
Hood River, Ore.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05

The great author, hobbling painfully
from his carriage, stepped slowly into
the publishers office.
That individual greeted him cordially.
"Well," he said, what luckT
"I've found 'em," said the great au-
thor. ~ picked out over 200 Of the
most foolish letters ever wrote"
"Do they reveal" said the publisher,
private details and trivial affairs, and
do they deal with things that ought
not to be published, but which people
like to read"
"They do"
The publisher grasped the great au-
thor by the hand.
"Splendidw he observed. That Is the
one thing needed. New York Life.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05
The Divers Kinds of Delay.

The automobile owner crawled
With haste into his car
And said goodby for he was called
To travel fast and far
He grasped the steering wheel with gle
And gave the clutch yank,
And then, with obJurgations he
Climbed down again to crank.
Again he mounted to the seat,
Prepared like wind to fly,
Yet there he fingered In the street.
The water tank was dry.
He filled the tank; it seemed cinchi
Once more he starts to chauff.
Behold he does not move an inch
The differentiars Off!
In rage he tolls with might and main
Till he is faint and weak;
Again he starts-and stops again.
The tires sprung a leak.
The shades of night are falling fast,
But Joy illumes HIS browI
He shoots ahead-hls troubl3s PAST.
Pray, who can catch him nowf
And yet, around the corner, we
May find this same machinei
It's owner Is not there, for he
Has gone for gasoline.
Council Bluffs NonpaReii.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05

however, the fatal sword was present
ed to him he fatty refused to kill him
self and declared that if he was to die
somebody else must kill him. Threats
and entreaties alike proved unavailing.
He resolutely refused. The whole of
Japan was scandalized at such immor-
al behavior, which, however, saved his
life. The japanese penal code had
never contemplated such contingency
as man inhuman enough to refuse
the "harikiri," and in the end he was
banished from the country and re
turned to France.-St James Gazette.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05

The madder is a plant. Turkey red
is made from the roots of the madder.
A red turkey is turkey mad. When
a turkey is madder than mad it is not
the turkey red madder. Turkey red
is not turkey mad, but mad turkey is
red. Red madder is not mad turkey,
but turkey red is turkey mad. Mad
der is raised In Asia. The turkey is
raised in the barnyard.-Judge.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05

A soreness in what is called the thin
BILE finger and even serious infamma-
ton are sometimes caused by the use
of cheap thimbles. These thimbles,
which are composed Of lead or some
thing equally injurious, may be tempt,
ing by reason of their low price but
they are not safe. Silver thimbles are
tie best, but for those to whom they
prove too expensive nothing is better
than thimbles Of highly FURNISHED
steel By person who gains her liy-
ing with her needle a steel thimble is
always liked, for it will outlast two OF
three of the more expensive silver
ones
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05
Agate Ware.

TO clean agate ware put the ware on
the stove filled with water and into the
water put a tablespoonful of salsodA
twashing soda, and then after awhile
use a securing soap, and you will be
pleased with the result; also put your
bean pot on the rtove and a good gen
erous tablespoonful of soda, and it will
wash as easily as a cup. A little sode
put in your greasy baking pans and
keeping them warm while washing
your other dishes will help along that
most disagreeable task. =.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05
; : - ;
Shocked His Nation.

A somewhat striking story dealing
with the now obsolete conventional
suicide, ''harikiri' or "happy dis
patch" once common in Japan. is told
by the French Admiral Gourdon.
When he was a young man he had
comrade who, having assisted in the
organizing of the japanese navy, was
subsequently raised to the rank of ad-
miral in that force. He took the part
of the tycoon against the mikadO in
the revolutionary war and, having
been captured, was tried by court mar
tial and sentenced to death, which in
those davs implied "harikiri." When,
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05
Always Food For LAUGHTER.

When Johnny was child they laugh
ed at the ridiculous things he said.
When he was a youth they laughed at
his half baked opinions. When he was
man they laughed at his wisdom be-
cause they couldn't grasp it. When he
was old they laughed at him for a
crank. There is always some one to
laugh, and this is jolly world.-New.
ark IN. j. News.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05
No Sympathy.

you frightened my horse with your
automobile" said the indignant farm
er.
"Well," answered the novice, "youE
horse had the best Of 1t. He wasn't
any more scared than l was and had
the advantage of being in a position to
run. n."-Washington Star.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05


Your hat" he objects, 'fs big, un-
wieldy thing that only catches the
wind"
"Yesw she answers.
Your sleeves, too, are baggy and
are sure to catch in your coffee cup at
the table and to cause you plenty Of
bother otherwise"
"YesP
"Your long skirt catches the dust"
Yes"
"And now that we are engaged l
want to ask why you persist in wear
ing such outlandish things"
II had to catch you, you know
Chicago Tribune.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05

II bought my wife the finest kind of
an arrangement for long auto rides"
"What is itP'
"a sort Of trap to wear ever her
mouth called dust protector"
"Does it workW
II don't know about the dust part
Of 1t, but it keeps her from talking
Detroit Free Press.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05

81 notice." barked the scion, that
when the trees begin to leave, although
they have their trunks with them, they
remain right where they are"
"And III be switched" Clipped in
the leap year bud, IF that should pre-
vent us from branching out"
Although that might be construed
as shady proceeding rejoined the
scion, II think the trees should not
take umbrage at what promises q fine
outrageous effect."-New York Times.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05
Fruit Land Snap.

| have choice tract of about IA acres OF
land Situated about 4 mile from the town OF
White Salmon, Wash. IL acres in cultivation.
THIS is the finest cherry land In this section;
also fine strawberry land; ;will be sold at bar
gain. A chance to make one OF the pleasant
est names in the world. Good school and
church facilities. Address A. II. Jewett,
White Salmon, Wash. dl5tf
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05
His DfHposition.

"Yes," said the benevolent man, Il
thank heaven for my happy disposl-
ton. am satisfied with what the day
brings forth and quickly forget the
pain and trouble that have passed"
"Ahv exclaimed the physician. THAT
explains your overlooking my little
ll."-Philadelphi Ledger.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05

A long fall in price of all
Building MATERIAL, and we
have the goods to complete
a house from cellar to garret
Buy all at one time and place and get
the benefit OF prices such orders war
rant.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05
He Made a Hit.

"Draughton has made a great hit
His fortune is In sight"
you mean that young architectT
"Yes"
"What has he done that's such q
hit2"
Hes designed a house that has
closets in which the wife has all the
hooks she needs without using every
one" brooklyn Citizen.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05

Patience-What rse are finger bowls
anyway?
Patrice-Why, they remind one to
go and wash her hands after leaving
the table.-Yonkers Statesman.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05
Don't Buy Land

In Hood River valley, either for fruit rails
ing or a summer home until you see Valley
View. Twenty acres, six cleared house, barn,
We'll, strawberries, fruit trees, excellent soil,
pare water, bracing air and magnificent
scenery, Price and terms reasonable. Call
"a or sdareSs G. A. HICKLE,
oct29 Hood River, Or.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05
This Week at Stewards

A big drop in price of all
Stoves.
The Improved SCOT De-
stroyer. l package (3Oe)
removes all SCOT from chin
ney, stove and pipe.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05

"The nearest some women ever come
to making their own Clothes" remark
ed the observer of events and things,
"is when they put on frills."
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05
Better Laundry

-Four weeks experience under the new manage
ment has proven that the Paradise Laundry is
doing better work than ever before
The rain does not affect our laundry work, while
it does yours and we want to lessen your troubles
in life and make life worth more the living.
We are in position to do your laundry by the
week, and should you wish to take advantage of our
offer, do so Immediately. Do not forget that the
holidays are coming, and we want to present the
people of Hood River with cean up-to-date, reli-
able laundry, and able to do all kinds of laundry
work with neatness and Dispatch
We can clean and make look like new all kinds of
blankets, lace curtains gents suits, ladies' dresses,
wooden underwear, cotton, woolens and fannels of
all kinds. Our motto "It is a cold day when Hood
River gets left"
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05

Church-Why, what on earth did you
do in the country If you didn't dshI
Gotham-Oh, we found other things
to lie about!
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05
BUnch of Autumn Smiles
From the Joke Factory

IF you look like duck,
oh, myl
n II you're built like doe.
Be shy;
If you look like duck or a doe or q deer
Keep cut of the woods at this time OF
year,
Keep out Of the woods, say !.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05

Bacon-That dog seems to have al
most human intelligence.
Egbert-How sol
"Why, he doesn't seem able to keep
a scent"
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05

Bill-Who first used the expression,
Hes all in,' do you think2
Jill-Why, the whale that swallowed
Jonah, guess.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05

Hardware, Furniture Stoves, Crockery, Paints, Oils
GLASS; Building Material.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05

Stock Taking Sales
until Feb. 1st.
Prices will be slashed on
many staple articles as well
as all odds and ends.
All departments included.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05

1t Would BE All Right.

Convict-Hello! What Jail did you
escape from?
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1905-01-05
DR.. FENNER'S
and
BaCkaChe
All diseases Of Kidneys, nWJNr
.E:;:! .sS. 4; s:i$::: RE
Dr0psy, Female Troubles. NSkAA

cure for you. II Unnecessary write DR.. Fenner.
He has spent a life time curing just such
cases as yours. All consultations Free.
Il suffered 10 years with backache and kid
ney trouble. Tried great many physicians
without relief, DR.. Fenner's Kidney and Back
ache Cure is the only Remedy that ever helped
me and after using only two bottles feel en-
tirely cured. Have no pain or ache of any kind.
Miss ALICE MCDONALD, Omaha, Neb."
Druggists Soc, 81. Ask for Cook Book-FREE
For Sale by c. N. CLARKE, Hood River.
BoletiÌn mercantil de Puerto Rico. (San Juan, P.R.) 18??-1918, 1905-08-14
DESDE CHILE

Santiago, ~ de Julio. An 1nciase
que Ell Consejo Superior de Marina ha
resuelto recon endar 4 las Camaras la
reconstruction de la armada chilera,
empezando por construir cuatro acora-
.zados de IL 900 toneladas. en- astilleros
lngleses.
Santiago, de Agosto.-Se ha for
mado ell siguiente nuevo gabinete:
presidencia interior, don Juan Anto-
MO Oriego; relaciones exteriores, don
Agust1n Edwards; justicia y educa-
cjon, don Antonio Hupeus; hacienda,
don Antonio Subercasuax Perez; que
IRA y marina, aln1irante don Luis Uri-
be; obras p1blicas, don Enrique Vile
gas. Asegdrase corta vida al minis
terio. %
En- Valparaiso hubo una tormenta
que dur6 dos dias y derribo 20 casas,
de- iando q muchas familias en- la mi
seria. Tn hombre Sc ahoge tratando
de salvar dos mujeres y varias per-
|sonss quedaron NAL heridas por los
lescombroS al caer.
BoletiÌn mercantil de Puerto Rico. (San Juan, P.R.) 18??-1918, 1905-08-14
2Dez zMa1natf'
Agosto - 1905.


Ya hemos dicho con franqueza, que
ell pueblo desearfa que, va que alguien
persigue la destruction de la raza ca
nina, Sc hiciera q atlas horas de la no
che. Sc dice que antier tarde andaba
por las Gales una perra dando tumbos
y volteretas.
Trasladamos la noticia a quien CO.
rresponda. ofreciendo ocuparnos de es-
te aSunto. {
x*
Para ell dia veintisiete esta seffa1ada
la coronation de la reira de la belleza.
Varias sefIoritas estan nombradas da-
mas de honor de la agraciada seforita
Mercedes Diaz Collazo.
Nv
Ell seflor Dones, accidentalmente Sc
hallaba aquf.
En- breve sc embarcaran los j6veneS
Quintero para los Estados Unidos.
La lluvia ha sido bsstante torrencial
en- estos t1ltimos dfas.
x*4
Don Ulises Suris, de Barceloneta, Sc
encontraba de paso en- esta poblacion.
Corresponsal.
BoletiÌn mercantil de Puerto Rico. (San Juan, P.R.) 18??-1918, 1905-08-14
PRDN $1,000 [ q

En- IA librerfa del rBoletin" Sc ha Z
recibido p, eciosos artfculos para rega
10, como albums con nlt1&ica y sin el;..
aicgantes necesseres pala srLoras, tin
teros de plata cristhofe, ceniceros de
tujo, carteras fnas. estnches para inge-
aieros, esenc1as inas, boquil.as de
ambar, etc. etc.
The Glenwood post., 1905-05-27
Another Exposure of Maud

Maud Muller, on summers day,
mounted a horse in new tangled way
1t took her some time, but she finally
decided to ride astride with skirts
divided. The horse was young, he
SHE'D and ran, and poor Maud blushed
at every man. AT last paper sailing
high caused Maud' horse to jump and
shy. All unexpected it came to Maud
and she knew then it was all fraud.
for she found herself with divided
skirt lying gasping and bruised in
the dusty dirt But her skirt had
caught on pommel there resulting
in long and a ragged tear. With
both hands she grasped the ragged
edges and made rush for the road
side hedges. The judge, as he sees
her tall and slim, says, she's tired
Of trying to be him.
The Glenwood post., 1905-05-27
Weekly Stock Letter

South Omaha, Nebraska, May "a
The largest trade excursion ever start
ed out of Omaha will leave over the
Burlington road tomorrow Thursday
morning and make visits at as towns
along the main line of that road. 1t
will be special train of Pullmans
and will consist, aside from Omaha
wholesalers and manufacturers, of a
large representation Of South Omaha
Livestock exchange members.
This is the first of series of such
excursions to be conducted this year.
The one which will follow will occur
June and 2, and will be under the
direction Of the South Omaha Live
stock exchange. 1t will travel over
the Burlington to Alliance. Nebraska,
and thence over the Northport branch
of that line to Guernsey. Wyoming.
Stops of about 10 minutes will be
made at towns en- route. A consider
able number of Omaha wholesalers and
manufacturer representatives will
accompany this excursion.
The appearance Of few days of
warm weather, indicating the approach
of summer at last, caused falling off
in the demand at all markets and in
consequence prices are somewhat lower
than those in last weeks quotations.
Prices the past week follow:
Cattle-Good to choice beef steers,
The Glenwood post., 1905-05-27
Fine
Stallion
i'll make the season mt
Cohngan'> Stables
GIenwood Springs
TERMS: SO to insure foal
ECAL
Administrators Sale

Notice is hereby gwen that by vir-
tue of a decree for sale of real estate
duly made and entered of record in
the County Court of Garfield county,
Colorado, will ON Saturday, the 10th
day of June, A d 1908, mt the hour
of 10 o clock in the forenoon of said
day, offer for sale and sell at public
sale to the highest and best bidder, at
the residence of the late Lena Curwin,
deceased, on Bennett avenue. in the
town of Genwood Springs, Colorado
all of the following described real es-
tate, to-wit: Lot No % in Block No
46, in the town of GlenwOod Springs,
Garfield county, Colorado. together
with the improvements thereon con
sisting of a six room frame dwelling.
Terms of sale cash
OLE THORSON,
Administrator of the estate of Lena
Corwin, deceased. 5-13-63.
Dated May 18th, A. D. 1908.
The Glenwood post., 1905-05-27
Notice for Publication
Department of the Interior,
land Office at Glenwood Springs, Colo

DopATIIueuI VI luo 1utoTlOT,
Land Office at Glenwood Springs, Colo.
April 10th, 1905.
Notice If hereby given that the fol
lowing named settler has filed notice
of his intention to make final proof in
support of his claim, and that said
proof will be made before Register
and Receiver at Glenwood Springs,
Colo, on Saturday June 10th, 1905. at
10 O'Clock a. IN. viz:
LUMAN U. COMSTOCK
of Glenwood Springs, Colo, on his P.
D. s. No. 3O74 Ute for the Lot g.. Sec
~, N. W. u, N. W. a, Sec. 80, Lot
4, and N. E. a, N. E. Il, Sec. 30,
T. 5. s. R. 81. W. 9th, p NJ.
He names the following witnesses
to prove his continuous resi- dence upon
and cultivation of said land. viz:
Theodore Rosenberg, of Glenwood
Springs, Colo.
John c. Yore, of Gypsum. Colo.
Albert Abrams. of Glenwood
Springs, Colo.
Frank w. Allen, of Gypsum, Colo.
J. F. SQUIRE.
Register
4-29-6-1O.
The Glenwood post., 1905-05-27
How to Ward Off Old Age

The most ccessful way of ward
ing off the approach of old age is to
maintain vigorous digestion. This
can be done by eating only food suited
to your age aud occupation, and when
any disorder of the stomach appears
take a dose of Chamberlain Stomach
and Liver Tablets to correct it. If
you have a weak stomach or are
troubled with indigestion, you will
find these Tablets to be just what you
need, For sale by all dealers
The Glenwood post., 1905-05-27
The Way We Grow

The stork which attends to baby
affairs in this community worked over
time during the past week, with very
gratifying results. Doctor Bell reports
the following visitations:
To Mr.. and Mrs. 2. B. Wise. last
Saturday, boy.
To Mr.. and Mrs. Joseph Wharton,
Sunday, girl.
To Mr.. and Mrs. George Lester,
Wednesday, boy.
And yesterday morning, Doctor
French reported the bird Of good omen
had left fifteen pound boy at the
residence of District Attorney Gentry.
All we'll, and-no wonder Presi dent
Roosevelt loves the White river
country. .-Meeker Herald.