The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-01-18
COMMENTS ON MEN AND
 MATTERS OF THE WORLD

| one wife at a time, but several in suc- eession, while the latter means taking all in sight Laying aside the heated ar- guments advanced on both sides, the man who can manage more than one wife at time deserves a great deal more credit than the man who can't manage one at a time and is thus driven into tandem polygamy.
 Some interesting telephone statistics are out and show that "centrar' was called Up 5,O7O,55455S times during the year 1904 by telephone users in the United States That is a very remarkable state ment no doubt and the census bureau deserves credit for making 1t public, but how many times has "Centrars" dulcet voice answered "Busy now" and how many times have il-tempered animals beloved at telephone belles those re- marks they would never dare address to their wives or to any woman except over a wire and at a safe distance? These are questions that the public has right to ask. The esteemed census bu- reau would do we'll to begin forthwith compilation that will give us few figures OH such matters.
 The grand old state of Kentucky seems to have the art of marrying so well de- veloped that Cupid may be excused for taking something now and then to help him stand the pace The most popular way to wed in the Bluegrass state Is to elope. It matters little whether there is ar '1rate" father to figure in the affair or not The young people simply elope and there Is an end of 1t. Sometimes they elope in couples and sometimes they have an elopement party in which a num- Der of hearts are welded; sometimes ths ''old folks" lend sly assistance to the elopement and sometimes fathers come along behind in post haste bearing wed- ding presents In one hand and forgive- ness in the other hlopements are cheap, they are good form and they are pop- ular in Kentucky. No Kentucky belle is going to take the ris.l of being proclaimed all old maid at the age of 25 so she 1 gets running start and elopes. To the credit of the commonwealth be l. said that Kentucky is not conspicuous in the
 
 Is a boon for modest man.
 Birmingham is a1ag this week and the rush Is to the theatres. From the high 1 ways and byways of Alabama the "pop- | ulace" is coming into town in great num- bers to see Ben Hur," "Tannhauser,y and to hear Paddy" play The hotels are running over and much coin of tho realm is changing hands but no one is obJecting. While parsimonous individuals may contend that all this money would b. better spentf TO the necessaries of life, Birmingham is maintaining her prestige as good show town" without a twings Of conscience
 A call has been sounded for all tha Smiths in the land to rise up and | ; vent T. Cuyler Smith from having his name changed to Telamon Smith Cuylers The Smith family is disposed to resent this insult offered to it's fair name and if all the other Smiths camp on the trail or T. Cuyler Smith. it is a safe bet that he will be named Dennis before he bed comes Telamon Smith Cuyler.
 It will be noticed how discussion of Arctic explorations dies out when thsi weather begins to grow cold and how rapidly it is revived when the warm months arrive People can talk about iceburgs. clashes over ice fields" and the hcrrors of a North pole blizzard very comfortably in the summer time, but 1 this is not cheerful topic when the rad. iator is out of order and coal bills are i high. Four months ago Peary was prom inent in public print but he is seldom l mentioned now PC.