Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1905-05-20

tnough. Town ana Country.
we don't hear you sing nowadays,
Miss Edith. My physician has strictly
forbidden me 10 practice" Does he
live in your neighborhoodT'
Mrs. Henpeck--And you call your
self man? Mr. Henpeck- Certainly,
my dear. that is--er-if You will per-
NIT me to,--Fuegende Batter.
Jenkins-You don't seem to bother
much about the future. Lightley--
No. that never worries me until it be-
comes the present.-EXchange
Mrs. Wise--How do you like the
new nurse girl? Mr., Wise-Great.
Mrs. Wise--I thought SO. That's why
fired her this morning. Boston
Globe
Deacon Jones-ln the better land
everything will be made known. Mrs.
Prye--Won't that he fine! I've always
wondered how old Sarah Wilson was.
Boston Transcript,
All" said the little girl who was
being filled with culture. "see the car
penter brawny building the house
beautiful with his hands sklllful -
Chicago Rccord-Herald
"You are as full OF airs az a hand
organ said a young man TO a girl
who refused to let him see her home.
THAT may be- was the reply, but |
don't go with a crank"
Here, take this rife" cried the ex.
cited Snowman. the leopard has ps-
capped II you find him shoot him on
the spot" (which sspot, sirG' gasped
the green employee Exchange
The Niece-W Weren't you shocked,
uncle when you heard that Harry had
died and left me n widow? The
Uncle-Wen, no That's about all |
ever expected he would leave you.
Judge You say you were alone
when you committed the robbery!
Nitro Bill--Yes. yer honor / allus does
me little jobs alone when we've got
a pal it's ten ter one he turns out dis
honest.--Judge.
Little WILLIE say, pa what is an
empty title? pam empty title, my
son. is your mothers way of referring
to me as the head Of the house when
there are visitors present Glasgow
Evening Times.
Pm sure I saw a cat over In that
corner" said Tommy. sitting up In bed.
mo, dear; 60 to sleep" said his moth
or; ut was just Imagination. Has
Imagination got shiny eyes T~phila-
delphia Ledger.
Mother Ethel you naughty child,
what have you been doing to make
Charley cry so? Ethel--I've only been
sharing my cod.liver oil with him,
dear mamma. You said it was so nice.
Harpers Bazar.
For goodness sake! What's that
noise" "1'he girl next door Is having
her voice cultivated Huh! Appar-
emily the process of cultivation has
reached the narrowing season.
Philadelphia Press.
Il have just been officiating at
wooden wedding on the West Side
said the parson. "Ofciatlng" quer-
led the puzzled friend Yes" ok
plalned the good man. II married It
couple OF Poles. - Chicago News.
Fwedde-That creature actually
told me to mind my own business,
y'know! Cholly-The impertinent
wretch! Fweddie-Positiyely Insult
ing. AS If to insinuate don't y'know
that was in buslness,-Cleyeand
Leader.
Blecker-My congratulations on
your marriage with the charming
widow. old man. ! knew you called
on her occasionally, but I had no idea
you intended to marry. Meeker
Neither did l until she had it all ar
ranged
Uncle George have read your ar
ticle over. and ! must say it shows
great deal Of originality Arthur
Thanks. I'm sure / flattered myself
there were some ideas in it. Uncle
George was not speaking Of the
composition, but Of the spelling!
Nephew Uncle, I'm In love with
the dearest girl in all the world. She
has golden hair, blue eyes, the whtesr
Of teeth and n fgure---- Uncle inter
mpting)-My dear boy really can't
consent to your marrying her unless
She has FIVE figures, at the least
Brooklyn Life
First Passenger Would you be-
good enough 80 lend me your special
cles a moment? Second Passenger
Certainly. sir with pleasure. First
Passenger THINKS Now as you
can NO longer read your newspapar,
win YOU please have the kindness TO
pas, it over TO mc|'
Boys Essay on Breath Breath Is
made of mir. We breathe always with
our lungs. except 1T night when our
breath keeps life going through oar
noses while wc.are asleep. Boys tA9t
Dtav In e. room All duy shouIdHt