Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1905-09-23
Il E HE RID IT ALL

certain United States senator from q
western state is making hard fight for re-
election. The tip Is out that he isn't going
to be reelected. Men from that western
state who drift through Washington give
out this tip In confidential sort of way to
Washington friends.
The fight that is being waged against the
senator is based upon the allegation that he
doesn't stick to his friends to employ a
time-worn phrase Of politics. And around
the state they are telling little story of a
Washington occurrence that goes to show
that the senator doesn't stick to his
friends"
Last winter one of the senator's workers.
a man who had served in the legislature of
the western state, came on to Washington
for the purpose of mailing. IL he could. a
federal appointment in his state The SEN
ator for whom he had worked for years had
promised him the appointment whenever the
expected vacancy occurred. and so the seek
or Of the office had good right to hike
along to Washington to look the situation
over.
He found the senator for whom he had
plugged for years in q sort Of tanning
frame of mind as to the appointment.
He called to see the senator several times
with regard to the appointment, and on
each occasion the senator furnished him
with copious injections Of the impalpahie
fluid known as caloric atmosphere-but still
the plum Q1On appear 10 crop any neal CT
the seekers reach.
One morning the seeker of the federal APP
pointment. who was beginning to get some
what het-up so to speak. over the whining
stunts Of the senator happened to corral
the senator in the very act of entering the
department on the payroll OF which he was
hankering to get his name. The seeker I'M
hesitatingly joined the statesman and plain
ly told him that he'd like to be taken to the
Secretary Of that department then and
there.
The senator. clearly grabbed and unable
to get out Of tt, was. Of course, equal to the
occasion, and he became all sweetness and
light and treacle
why. certainly, my son-certainly. my
loyal friend. and son OF the friend Of my
youth" he said with vast cordially. We'll
go right into the Secretarys office and when
we emerge III wager it'll be all right for
YOU"
So. together. they went in and saw the
Secretary.
The senator presented the seeker. He told
| the Secretary in rich glowing verbiage what
hot stuff his man was, and how well equip
ped he was for holding down the billet for
which he was an applicant He spread 1t on
thick and hard. The Secretary nodded and
for minute or two 1t looked to the seeker
that the job he wanted was just as good as
his'n.
"Humph" rasped the senator then. fur
lively signaling to his constituent Il wish
to have just word privately with the Sec
rotary with reference to another matter
I'll join you in the corridor in a moment,
and the applicant for the federal job took
the hint as matter Of course and withdrew
in the direction of the corridor.
But, on his way to the corridor, Thought
struck him. So he didn't go out to the cor
ridor.
This ofice-seeker was more than seven
years of age. and he wanted to be dead
sure that there was going to be anything
doing on his side.
So. instead of retreating to the corridor
until the senator had concluded the other
business" with the Secretary, he only step
ped behind tall screen close to the exit
door.
And from that place of secrecy he heard
the following:
"Er-uh" began the senator in low tone
and the listening seeker felt that the SEN
ator was winking sagely at the Secretary
you understand thfs-er-matter, or
course? My constituent happened upon me
as I was entering the building, and. or
course. when he asked to be brought IN TO
you, had to-er-you understand. all right.
Of course. No elaboration necessary. Ell!
Er-uh-we've got another man that we
want to have that place. but we've got to
wait till this one gets out of the-oh. you
understand. all right We've spoken to the
President about our other man. and,uh-
oh. VARY well. You are aware OF the situa-
ton Of course" The eavesdroppfng seeker
felt that his senator and the Secretary were
exchanging sage winks once again
Then the senator made his bow to the
Secretary ana a., when st ne nacna 1 It
And the messenger who was seated out
side the Secretary's door heard the con-
stituent make the following little speech
to the senator:
Jim" Gt wasn't "Jim." but 1t was the
diu,inutive of the senator's Christian name)
Jim, I've known right along for quar-
ter of century or so that you We're
counterfeit. a bogus, phony and cheap
man, but during all of that time I've been
holding up your hands and helping you out
to the best of my ability. in spite OF my
knowledge of your spuriousness and your
cheapness. 1 find out now. however, ana
I'm glad to find out, that you won't 90;
and although 1t may not strike you here
and now that 1 slther much Ice, l want 10
nut YOU wise to the fact that this last quar-
ter of an hour is going to prove about the
most disastrous in your whole four-hushing
career!' I'LL. ,,,.;,e
ewes and flushed face, made a right wheei
and left the toga-wearer standing oun-
founded in the corridor
And so, now they're saying that the SEN
ator Ia scheduled to get beat for re-elec-
ton. And, similarly. those in the know de,
clare that the senator's little overheard
soto yoce conversation with the Secretary
that time Is going to be one OF the main
cnntributory elements to his DEFEAT