The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1905-06-25
MORAL SNOBS APPEAR
- AT THE HEAVENLY GATES.
By JOHN w. HAYS.

He looked for the lightning to strike
the gate-keeper down, an awful warm
,ng, and was much disappointed when
the bolt did not fall. He had never
cussed such cuss in all his life and
now Strengthened himself up with
lofty sense of his own moral superior
ty. He was one of the elect.
Saint Peter hung his head. Not often
II these latter centuries had he made
such break. But some people Will
try even a saints patience, as all of
is know.
Don't get excited" spoke up the
Did saint when he had recovered his
eomposure. Those people shall not
tonae in to mix up with you. You three
ire assigned to that exclusive apart
ment in the far corner of Paradise. 1t
was intended for bathroom
but | found separate place
ior select, Al, brand of saint. The
tpartmeIlt is a little stuffy and gloomy
ind the plumbing is not altogether up
o-date, but then you know anything
better than mingling with these peo-
ole out here in the park where there
will be music and dancing for young
people, romping and -go-rounds
or children. whist and juleps for the
Id and inirm, 20 say nothing of all
" things"
He ceased, and now to him again
he red-faced one Sententiously:-
Il had rather be orthodox than be
light! [ mean mean-that to be
orthodox is to be right! No, / mean
hat it is always right to be orthodox,
You see it is so unrestful to be with
people who make me feel that | do
lot know it all. But Saint Peter" she
NtVa.K -l1s,
lattered by his delicate compliment,
But Saint Peter. do you really mean
hat apartment has been reserved
'gainst our coming and that we are
have exclusive use of it through
,ternity?"
Yes, for you and your set" an
;wcrcd the saint most amiaby. Some
ire already there and few more are
coming, only select few you know.
and | should also mention a bunch
# little devils which slipped by me one
lay when | was doing and have
,een placed in there with the hope
hat association with the superior elect
nay reform them, but already they
ire begging to be returned to hell"
But Peter,"-
Look here! You have kept there
I'D people and this whole line waiting
his half hour! Have you no consider
ttlOn Tor any put yourselves! move
m! Where to? Why into the grand
'tand, reservcd-seats, special apart
nent for moral snobs!''
But Peter!-'
"Begonei Vamoosc. Git,'
And as the old saint had turned red
the face again and was fumbling
where his sword used to hang they
moved on and quickly. Then a mo-
uent after I heard sounds, as the
lewiy arrived saints and the little
lewis behind the bathroom door ex-
hanged assurances of distinguished
consideration.
Already now the old people had
assed within TO join their blessed
ind under shady trees by still waters,
nd ! being next in ii@c passed up my
heck. But Saint Peter, without even
8 glance at my credentials whfstied up
policeman who catching his forked
all in the slack of his arm seized me
Y tho collar
"You's de bloke rs been waitin for!
\ow you'll sit yO' mug punched in!''
nd with that he flung me far out
With a start ! walked and would now
G most grateful to have this peculiar
ircam interpreted.
Louisburg, y. c., June %.