Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1905-09-28
THE STORY TELLER.
A BITING REJOINDER.

An official in the government service
at Washington tells of the rupture Of tie
friendly relations that had SO long sub
sister between his daughter of years.
named katharine, and another little girl
of the same age. called Marie. 1t appears
that, Immediately after the falling out
the youngste' las, mentioned was moved
to communicates to the parents of Kath-
airline certain details of the distressing oc-
currence. When next the two children met
there ensued some rather severe recrimi-
nations. SAID Katharine:
II think you're Just n hateful. me IN
thing to tell my father and mother that
I bit you. You just ought t. be ashamei
OF yourself.'
well" retorted Marie. II think you
ought to have been ashamed to bite me-"
Suppose did bite YOU" vehemently
answered Katharine; you bite sometimes
don't you?"
Whereupon Marie ovinced the great est
Indignation. Let me- toll you one thing"
she observed. IF do bite, 1 never bite
any one outside ny own family!"
JIMMY's REMARKABLE STORY
A SchoOl-Toachcr who was giving a
lesson on Food was interrupted by
one of his pupils
please, SIR" he said, Jimmy says he
knew "A baby that was brought up on
Elephants milk. and it CAMEL ten pounds
in weight every day"
James ougnt not to tell you such rub
bsh.' the teacher said. James. whose
baby was it that was brought up on e'e-
plants milk"
please. sir" n,wered Jimmy, 1t was
the ri plants
CONsORT or THE KING OF TER
RORS.
Among the we'll known characters In
EiddefOrd 20 years agp was "A brick man.
ufacturcr named Nat kimball who was
noted for his witty rrtOrts. One day the
old man was taken very i'll, and seemed
very near his end whsn the minister call.
ed. The conversation drftcd around tc
the matter of future existence.
Mr. Kimball" said the preacher, sol
emily, don't you have any dread o.
meeting the King Of Terr1rs?'
Huh" gruntcd the old man! g.
don't know why should. I've lived with
the queen more'n ~ year
TIME AND SETTING HENS
a u
the large cities went to Il certain rura
community and endeavored to sell al
Incubator to n farmer. His arguments di'
not make any impression npon tn
agriculturist. Finally, as a clincher IL
favor of his up-to-date improvement. h
exclaimed.
| Look at the time it will save!"
The fa,mer suuirtcd a mouthful Of to
h,cco iuice on tho ground before rcply
ing, and then said, with provoking calm
ness.
"Oh. what's time to n sett n hen?"
That s,ttl d the question. No incubato
was sold.
A JEWEL
young Philadelphia woman recent
answered an advertisement for the pos
t,on of dining room girl and the lad
OF the house seemed pleased with he
Before engaging her. however. she asl
ed her some questions about the wor
that she expected her to do.
"Suppose." said the mistress, mir
YOU. only suppose, that you were carr.
ing piece Of steak from the kitchf
then by accident you should let 1t Dire
fraom the plate to the floor. What wou
You do In such a case?'
The girl looked the lady square
the face for a moment and then aske
cautiously:
lis this a private family or are the
boarders?"
,"rhis Is O boarding house." replied Il
"pick 1t up and put it back on Il
plate"
"You can start right away