davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1905-06-15
FRAGMENTS
>BY BILL NYE, JR.>

Yes, most dearest Evangeline,
of course. The aeronaut you refer
to Is a genuine hot-air artist
Come again.
There is very little, if any, rag
chewing INDUCED in among the
young ladies engaged in a chew
ing-gum establishment.
We hear of splendid catches be-
ing made at the numerous fishing
resorts in this community. CAS-
for us, we are shedding scalding
tears of remorse.
When a policeman makes an
important arrest he is compli-
mented for his pluck, but the
plucked one must "stand" for the
bouquets.
We read of a man in New York
state entirely devoid of brains.
Incidently, he is laughing up his
sleeve at those unfortunately pos
sessed with that particular organ
and don't know how to use it.
Climatic conditions are not of
the best down Panama canal way.
And only recently 1000 mules
were ordered by the government
to be used on the work, which will
make that country healthier than
ever.
Considering the world is round
and China directly underneath us.
if man should make balloon as
cension and he should accidently
fall out of the balloon basket,
would he 60 straight up, down, or
Explanations are in order.
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1905-06-15
ffluldoon on Hirsbips.

sicrytary room the Office. In the
NAME time I finished the boat part
av the ship, and incydintly pound
ed the thoomb nails off me paws
an sawed mesilf in the leg.
Most invinters work in saycrit,
an I had to, too, as all av the wash
machines had been utylized. AT
Their it wur complete, excipt the
paintin', I commlnced a systymat-
ic stoody on gravytation. The wan
obstycle in me path wur how to
get in the air an fly afther I got
there. [ cud make the propeller
propill an the drive wheel spin,
but I cudn't git wind enough un-
der the wings to lift me hat.
Wild the loss av all siIf-respict
an siveral mlssylanyus articles, I
wur on the pint av givin' up whin
me Office bye suggested that I start
off av the top av the barn. The
brillyincy av the idaya staggard
the foundation av me conception.
Yis! Shure! Av Coorse! Wy
didn't l think av it before? I
give him five cints to chase himsilf
wild fer fear he wud plajarize the
rist av me invintion.
That night Grogan an mesilf
wild, block an tackle placed the
''rocket" in position on the cupalo
av the barn. To kape the equilib-
rum from tippin' over we had to
git in at the middle an work to-
wards each ind. Win I wur
ready to start the ingine, Grogan
wanted to git out, sayln' it wud
make him dizzy to 60 up so high.
Not carin' to ride be mesilf I CON-
prymised the sitywation wild him,
to the iffict that we wud stay in
the ward at about thurty-fve laty-
TODD. AS I adjoosted the airbrake
an turned on the currint, me
wife's profysy come troo. Br-r-r
whit the wheels, an swlshy swish
famed the wings, thin the propil-
Ter room into the mizzin mast an
Grogan jumped out. The suddin-
Miss av the concooshun knocked
all the poise out av me balince an
we slid down both sides av the
barn respectively.
[ committed an act av provy-
dince on my side be knockin' the
last howl out av the neighbours
cat. The extermynation av that
feline more than covers the ex-
pinses av me trouble an injoories
to me systim. b. b. 81.
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1905-06-15

APOTHEGMS OF FAMOUS MEN.

Revenge justice
the ought law to weed outFrancs Bacon
Government trust, of government
and both the and the trustees created for the bene
tit of the peope-Henry Clay
certainly stark mad he cannot make and yet he
will be making gods by dozens-Montaigne
lamp by which feet guided and that the
lamp experience know of Judging of the future but by
the past-Parick Henry.
keep alive your breast that little spark of celestial fire
-conscience-George Washington.
You may break, you may shater the vase if you WILL
But the scent of the roses will hang round it still
Thomas Moore.
Truth crushed to earth shall rise again
The eternal years of God are hers;
But Error wounded, writhes with pain,
William Cullen Bryant.
What the first who studies philosophy? To
part with fconceit For it is impossible for begin to
learn he thinks that he already knows-Epictetus
anything advantage thee that shall make
thee break thy word lose thy Aureius
The be deceived think oneself knowing
than ohers.-La Rochefoucauld.
great genius without of madnessSeneca
We ought do neghbor good If you do
good good will be done but do evil the will be
measured back to you again-Pilpay
would have a slave to till my ground
To carry to fan while sleep
And trembe when wake for all the wealth
That sinews bought and sold have ever earned
William Cowper
Now blessings light on him that Sleep
over thoughts all like cloak is meat for the hungry
drink the thirsty heat for the cold and cold for the hot 1t
balance that the king and the shepherd the fool and the wise
man, even.-Cervantes
world that be which call the heavens by
the vault of which all things enclosed must conceive to be
deity eternal bounds neither created subject at
the human mind form conjecture It,
-Piny the Elder.
Mahome made people believe would call hill
him. and from the top OF offer his for the
people assembled Mahomet called the hill to him..
and again and when the hill stood still he was whit
abashed said f the hill will to Mahomet Mahomet
will 90 the hill Francis Bacon
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1905-06-15

subscribers to drop off your mail
in list cause I no it wood reduce
your advertiser rates, and make it
hard to pay off them fellers of
yourn, besides I've got pain in
the he'd. Yes have.
Lovingly Yourns,
[. B. A. RUBE.
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1905-06-15

" autymobile ixcitemint, amy
wan wur considered fine
shower if they cud knock the
horns out av CROWN calf or make
poork wild some rooral cityzans
.shoats. It seems so long beyant
yez might call it prehistoric
times, fer in this age av safety
valve prissure an autymatic coorn
salve yez can't tell what the neigh
boor will do mkt. While the
pooblic wur waitin' fer somewan
to "haray-kyry' thimsilves, Sandy
Dumont, the Frinch balloon crank,
hung another Grape on the dure
av civilization be invintin' wan av
thin airyplane airships. Me
brother wur tindin' bar at the time,
but joomped his contract to be
Sandy's chief midical adviser.
Wan day he wur filled up wild
scientific inspirations an attimpt-
ed to find thin in the middle av a
live dinymo, in soobsequince lost
most av his outer casin' The in
nocint lamb; if it wurn't fer the
size av his pinsion he might have
lost his family in divorce coort.
Originally there wur twlnty- five
-denomynations av foaters, pro an
con. Thin the intervintion an
consolidation av the sun proof
paint company an oorphon asy-
looms had twinty-foor combined.
The FORMER because they knocked
paint off the high buildings, an
the latter said space wur gettin'
inadequate. The survivin' MINI
Der av the croosade is a marvel av
intilliglnt construction, havin'
plinty sv vintylation, STORAGE
batteries, an a goovermint licinse.
Grogan sv the twinty-eight i'm
foorms me that Standard lie bought
a flock av thin to float stock wild.
The first time I saw wan it wur in
a magazine, an yez can imagine
how it sit me intillictual faculties
vbratin'. If I cud make wan that
wud fly, thin me indypindince wur
shure, an safe in the sinate in
evytible. Says I to mesilf, "All
av me antsisters, more or liss, wur
Unlisted wild mechanical janyus;"
thin, accordln' to laws av hereby
tary, the germ lies dormint in me
own systim. I conclooded the
only way to give the concintratin'
power av me brain full swing wur
to retire in solytood an lit me
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1905-06-15
Rube Tells Of the
Fight.
Mr.. Edutor:

Mr.. Edutor:
Deer Sur:-Haint I bin tellin'
you rite along that when them
Russian punts from the Baltic See
got a good square look at Mr.. Togo
and his 1oaters that they'd drop
thru a hole and pull the hole in
after them. 1 nod they'd do it
Jest as sure l nod I've got four
eyes.
All them papers that gifts to me
SEES 1t was one of the biggest
fights on water that has ever taken
place. Jest think of it. One Of
the biggest. Why don't they say
the biggest and be done with it?
Why sur when they SEES that Nell
sons fight in Trafalgar and John
Paul Jones little two ship scrap
was modern warfare begins to
think that them chaps don't no
any more bout scrapin' than l do.
No they don't. They jest rite to
see how it looks, when fixed out in
printers ink. Maybee, Mr.. Edutor,
I don't no what modern means.
Maybee I don't.
Well sur comm back. to that
fight over there on the Japo See,
there were two sides to that scrap.
Yes there was. Now haint that
logic? I am beginin' to think
that the workin' apparatus in my
skull is runnin' long pretty smooth
whom I can arrive alta conclusion
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1905-06-15
Fl Glimpse In LIES Book.

r lille sitting alone in shadowy nook
w once fell to scanning Lies close-written book.
read in that medley of bygone years,
The songs and the sobs, the smiles and the tears,
The moments of sorrow and moments ofjoy.
The thoughts of the child and the thoughts of the boy
The thoughts of young manhood and maturer age
Were all written there each following page.
saw my dear home as it that day
long time ago, with glad children in play,
While father and mother looked joyfuly
When gladly greeted each beautiful dawn
Greeted the dawn of each day and its close;
Welcomed each night with it's peaceful repose
How happy were! Nor tutored nor sage
lnger with love each whitening page
1 read that first sorrow of earliest day,
When she, my dear mother taken away;
When grim death had and had left in its train
Hours of sorrow and anguish and pain
little did know, then, the terrible COST
Nor yet understand what friend had lost.
The home then broke up and the motherless hurled
About here and there in the pitiless world.
I saw where my life first was sweetened by love,
Pure the breath of the Father above
felt again the hearts thrilling beat
AS gladly FASTENED the loved one meet
There in the lane meath the old redwood tree
Where the birds seemed sing for just her and mel
Where the seemed to shine for only two;
Where nature each evening seemed beautiful new.
saw where wandered away from the right
Road to the one of the uncertain light.
felt again the grief and the shame,
When broken in spirit, dishonored my name,
Friends who were near when Fate had been kind
Passed by Disguised and left me behind.
Shame and dishonor of sin is the wage
with this tear-blotted page.
Thus sat reading in Memory's book,
There, all alone in that shadowy nook
Unseeing sat there reviewing the years
From boyhood to manhood. The hopes and the fears,
The days that were happy and those that sad
When clouded in sorrow, cheerful and gad
When peaceful my spirits, maddened with rage
It's all jotted down each fast-fading page
EMERITUS
The Oskaloosa herald., 1905-05-11
STORMY" JORDAN.
FAMOUS PROHIBITION FIGHTER
OF oTTuMWA DIES THIS
MORNING.

ottumwa, May G.-Kinsey Jordan,
better known az STORMY" Jordan,
died at his home In this city at one
o'clock this morning. Jordan gained
a national reputation by the fight he
made against prohibition when the
prohibit0ry law went into effect In
1884. In his fight against the law ne
succeeded In keeping his saloon run.
ming under the protection Of the Unit.
cd States courts, but the law ruined
him financially. Jordan came TO OF.
tumwa in 1860 and was In business
here until 1897, when he retired from
active business life.
He has been suffering from droDsy
and the disease finally caused his
death. He had been bsdridden for
sixteen weeks prior 10 mis- death. He
was ~ years old and leaves a wife
and seven children. The funeral will
be held from his late residence, cor.
ner Main and VINE streets, at Q o'clock
Sunday afternoon.
The Oskaloosa herald., 1905-05-11
NORTHUMBERLAND
cENTERvILLE WILL BUILD CON.
NEcTIoN WITH oskALoosA.
BUXTON LINE.

C~enterville, Ia, May 6~.--Centeryllle
is almost assured Of an electric rail
road from this city TO Forbush, Mystic
and other surrounding towns, and pos
sibly a line that will reach out 10 Os,
kaloosa.
There has just been organized I'm.
der the laws Of the state of Maine an
incorporation with powers to construct
and operate interurban railways, efsc.
trio street railways, electric light and
gas and heating plants with a capital
stock Of $500, 900. The incorporation
was completed in Chicago this week,
with Frank s. Payne Of Centeryille
president; r. p. Shontz Of New York
City vice president; and G. p. Camp.
bell Of Chicago secretary and treas.
urer.
This corporation has taken over the
entire properties Of the Citizens Elec.
trio Light and Gas company in Cen.
terVille, including the electric light
plant, gas, hot water heating and cleo.
trio street railway holdings. and com.
menced TO operate them the first day
Of May. The chief object Of the In.
corporation ID 10 operate interurban
railways from out Of Centerville and
plans are now on foot TO present the
matter at an early day. President
Payne said today that the company
would be ready TO submit the matter
to the Centeryille Commercial club
and Centerville citizens in a short
time.
One route under consideration Is 20
Buxton, to there connect with the Bux.
ton. Oskaloosa line, and then 10 OF.
with the line proposed by the
Francis interests.
The Oskaloosa herald., 1905-05-11
CONTEST IN GRAND ARMY.
Corp. Tanner, Gen. carnahan and
r. Brown Candidates.

Washington, d. c., May Ga splr
tied contest for the Office of command
er-in-chlef Of the Grand Army has be
gun. Corporal James Tanner, register
Of wills for the District Of Columbia
today announcer his candidacy, and
will have the solid support Of the dc,
partment Of New York. His principal
antagonist Is General A. X. Carnahan,
Of indianapolis, the head Of the mill
tary branch of the knights Of Pythias.
Literature galore Is being sent out in
behalf Of each candidate. Robert
Brown, a veteran editor Of GAINESVILLE,
o., also may enter the race. The cleo
ton will take place In Denver at the
national encampment In July.
The Oskaloosa herald., 1905-05-11
IN n QUAKER CITY.


ago. lilo said he had preserved n Al
long that n became tattered and that
no secured a republication ~ u fol
the sake " preserving a. The clip
ping was q poem and was "a follows
powN ny TiiE SEA.
I stood ny her eide when the tide
camo In,
with its creeping kiss and lm vail
Ing moan;
| held her fast--waa she Minis 20 win
Might ! call her, In some, days, my
own7
1 looked IN the depths Of her hazel
eyes;
Close to our feet crept the restless
sea;
In the tender tones that fond hearts
prize,
I told her how fair she was to me
praised the grace Of her queenly
head,
The flashing waves sung low and
sweet
The bright eyes shone at the words
said,
While the light foam nestled about
her feet.
praised the sheen Of her chestnut
hair,
Never q word she said to me,
But closer she crept to my side, down
there,
BY the restless, tossing, moaning
sea.
Could she be miner" As I held her
fast,
/ asked the driver; he spoke me
And said che would sell me, first and
last,
For a hundred dollars, the chestnut
mare"
Robert J. Burdette.
The older readers Of The Hawk.Eye
will doubtless remember the poem
and recall the feeling OF amused cha
grin with which their sentimental at
titude was knocked galley west" by
the unromantic ending. r
w. II. d.
The Oskaloosa herald., 1905-05-11
OUTPOST AT TRACY.
Phil kearney @. A. r. MuSters In a
New Division.

Phil Kearney Post this morning
sent a delegation of members 10 Tracy
where they will muster In fourteen
veterans In an outpost Of Phil Kear,
ncy. The neW members will DO quite
an addition TO the Post and with otn.
erg mustered in will help in making a
splendid showing during the encamp.
mont. Those at Tracy today were:
Commander j. r. Gentry, Comrades
Robert Turner, James Loughridge,
Robert Klssick,. w. II Shaw, J. l..
Moore, J. b. Pearson, G.. Woodruff, J.
Myers, Col. J. r. Mcneil and J. II.
Baer.
The Oskaloosa herald., 1905-05-11
OUR COLORED SOCITY.
Inc and Oats 81 the Local celeny
and their Ffiens

Mira Cora Irnea and Mrs. Cora
FRANKLIN accompanied thu M "A, AL.
Mrs. phoeha junes, 10 Buxton Monday.
Attorney onorss n. woodson wont
10 Buxton THE morning TO look sitter
his legal practice there,
Hob johnson IL now handling the
bile delivery wagon ot tho Marshall
OIL Co. III and about the city.
Wesley Chapel gave a supper and
entertainment MT the church Friday
evening.
Miss Leila sheffey entertained at
dinner Tuesday Mrs. phoeba Jones, of
Keokuk, and Mrs. Cora Jones and Mrs.
Cora Franklin, Of this city.
w. G. Coleman. who was operated
on for an abscess and gathering on
the left side of mis- head, is improving
nicely and expects to be able to be
at work again In n week or two.
Mrs. A. q. Clark went to Ottumwa
Tuesday to attend the annual display
of the Art and Crafts Department Of
the Good Intent club Of that city, and
read q paper on art and craft work
before the club.
Rev. @. II. Thomas, who has been
assigned to the Oskaloosa charge, ar.
rived last Saturday and conducted
services at the church Sunday. The
elder has been looking the ground
over this week and expresses himself
well pleased with the outlook.
Henry Churchill was very much in
evidence at the ball game Thursday.
II was Church's first appearance for
several weeks owing to a little mis-
understanding between him and the
county attorney in regard to his dona-
ton to the school fund, which caused
Church'g retirement.
Jas. Stanley, Of Galveston, Texas,
spent Friday in the city, the guest Of
members Of the G.. A. X. Post, and left
Saturday for Cedar Rapids, where ne
will visit with his brother for several
weeks. Mr.. Stanley was q victim
Of the Galveston food a few years
ago, in which he lost his entire fam
lily, a wife and two daughters, and
several thousand dollars in property.
: Thursday the Des Moines branch OF
the Iowa Afro-American council ten.
dered a farewell reception at 81.
Pauls A.. NJ. Il. church TO II. R.Wright
and wife, who will leave shortly for
Puerta Plata, Santo Domingo, where
Mr.. Wright has been appointed consul.
Farewells for the local churches were
extended by the Rev. A. o. Johnson,
for the Afro-American council by
George ]. Holt, for the Masons by w.
II. Humburd, for the people OF saylor
by II. w. Austin, for the negro women
by Mrs. II. s.. Graves, for the Iowa ne.
gro bar by George II. Woodson, and
for the Sunday morning choir by Mrs.
i. Il. Elliston, who also presented Mr..
Wright with a gold stick pin. Re.
freshments were served by Mesdames
+. ID. Jackson, s. Joe Brown. George |.
Holt, II. s.. Graves, E. J. Mack, II. w.
Austin and Selma Stanton. In the AT.
ternoon the Iowa negro bar rendered
a S O'Clock dinner at the home Of S..
Joe Brown, 1887 Seventh street. Re.
freshments were served by Mrs. Brown
assisted by Misses LtheI Bowmer.
Iona Wilson and Lorna Wilson.
The Oskaloosa herald., 1905-05-11
TO KILL DANDELIoNs.
Simple Exterminator Suggested BY
An Old Time Gardener.

A simple remedy is recommended
by an old gardener for Kidding the
lawn of the dandeloin pest. Get d
supply OF common coal oil In an Oil
can. Eject a couple or three drops OF
the oil into the center OF the plant and
In a short time the dandelion will be
hors de combat. 1t does not require
the time to give the oil treatment that
cutting out the flowers does, and It is
a much more effective method Of re-
Heying the premises of the pest. Try
IT once and be convinced Of the worth
of the treatment.
The Oskaloosa herald., 1905-05-11
SEVERE IOWA STORM.
Town Of Cincinnati is Recovering
From Tornado.

Cincinnati, Ia, May Gas far az
telephone communication is concern,
ed Cincinnati has been isolated until
today since Wednesday night, when
a storm Of tornado size struck the III.
tie town and did much damage. The
farm house occupied by Oliver Ross
and family, about four miles south.
west OF town, was completely demol.
ished and Mr.. Ross and members OF
his family seriously hurt.
The Oskaloosa herald., 1905-05-11
o
And az a Result Several Boys May
Get Into Trouble.

A number Of young men Friday ey.
sning made themselves liable to BE
we're punishment under the state
laws by stealing the refreshments
that had been prepared for the so
cfal gathering Of young people at
the home OF Miss Mabel Dewhirst,
No. 1926 @ avenue east. The boys
are SONS OF well known and respect
able families OF the city and they
have been implicated in other SINH
lar affairs. In justice to those who
have suffered and TO protect others
from similar embarrassment caused
by the acts OF the lads the matter in
this case may be- turned owe to the
police.
The Oskaloosa herald., 1905-05-11
MISSIONARY MEETING.
Work In Egypt Discussed by Ladies'
Of the v. p. Church.

The Ladies Missionary society OF
the United Presbyterian church met
at the home Of Mrs. s. w. Wilson
Friday afternoon, May s. The sub
Ject under discussion was Missionary
Work in Egypt during the Past Fifty
Years" The different phases Of the
work were ably discussed by many OF
the members present, showing that
the work has made wonderful pro.
gress and is In a very prosperous
condition. At the close Of the bust
ntss meeting an hour was spent So
cially, during which Miss Marguerite
Carroll did herself credit by furnish.
ing instrumental music, and a dainty
luncheon was served by Mrs. s. w.
Wilson and Mrs Oren Lyon, who also
had charge OF the program during the
afternoon. An unusually large mum.
Der were present and we were glad
20 receive Mrs. Frank Waters as a
now member.
All returned TO their homes feeling
that they had spent a profitable as
well as a pleasant afternoon.
The Oskaloosa herald., 1905-05-11
WRITING Up Tax Lists.

Assessor VIII Matthews is now en-
gagged upon the tax lists Of the city,
writing them up as revised by the
board Of review, and he has a task
before him that will require several
weeks of diligent labor. He Is work.
ing in the supervisors room OF the
court house and is being assisted in
the work by former City Clerk 8. X.
Crissy, who was the clerk OF the board
Of review and who is specially quail.
fed for the work, being acquainted
with the record Of the alterations
made.
The Oskaloosa herald., 1905-05-11
ARM BROKEN.
Little Joseph eIdweII Meets With An
Accident.

Joseph Bidwell, aged twelve, who
makes his home with his grandfather.
Joseph Burdock, sustained a broken
arm Friday afternoon. He had gone
after tho cows and engaged In a wrest
ling match with a boy companion in
the pasture. Both boys came down
together and Joseph's arm got in the
way. DR.. Clark was called and re-.
duced the fracture.
The Oskaloosa herald., 1905-05-11
SMITH IS INDICTED.
Buxton Man Who Killed Sam irwin
Held For Murder.

Abba, Ia, May 6-The Monroe
county grand jury has returned an
indictment against Andrew Smith,who
killed Sam Irwin at Buxton on Satur.
day morning last, charging him with
murder in the first degree. Smith,
VINO was captured In oskaloosa, Is in
jail here and calmly awaits trial. He
win say but little, but the man win
defend himself by alleging improper
relations between Irwin and his wife.
The Oskaloosa herald., 1905-05-11
Lot Of Eoos.

Fremont Gazette: Last week II. A.
Jackson advertised that he would
give away $3.50 in merchandise TO the
person who would bring TO his store
before 4:30 p. M. Saturday, the iarg.
est number Of eggs. During the week
he received bushels OF eggs and at the
wind up, the merchandise was given
10 Mrs. Ed Mills. she having delivered
the highest number, 12C dozen, or A.
512 eggs.
The Oskaloosa herald., 1905-05-11
Horses GETTING Scarce.

II. J. Baker will ship another large
consignment Of horses from the city
Monday. Ono lot of good animals
goes TO Buffalo and another one TO st.
Louis. Mr.. Baker was In Montezuma
today In the effort TO secure enough
animals to make up tho shipments.
The demand for the animals Of a de-
girable nature is Increasing and IL is
becoming rather hard to pick up the
stock.
The Oskaloosa herald., 1905-05-11
NOTED HoRsEMAN E A

Cedar Rapids, Ia, May 6.-Emil
Lefsbure, sr., one Of the most noted
importers OF Belgian horses. died at
his home here today.
The Oskaloosa herald., 1905-05-11

The following interesting facts were
gathered by the houseto-house visit.
ing committee Of the County Sunday
School Union, concerning Prairie
The Oskaloosa herald., 1905-05-11
c. YER pLoEG,
At,erney.at Law

over Pixies drug store.
once phone 34i. res. 1916 black.
mg.4sm6l