The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1905-04-16

VI gilman town, whore a single nights
stay Is the limit Of profit, the scenery has
70 be treated by a local firm lat a cost Of
$500 no matter how many inspection tests
serious.
One point overlooked by all Inspectors
is that no matter how fully fireproof scene
may be made the dust gathers In the fine
fibres Of the cloth. This will run the FIRE
into the -gridiron,' no matter what IRE
proof precautions may be taken, and the
old safeguard Of sharp knives in the gallery
for cutting the ropes IL still the only real
remedy.
Three worried looking men driited into
a theatrical agents Office the other after
noon and explained to the man in charge
that they sought the services Of q quartet
for dinner to be given to a prominent
member Of their organization. After a
search Of his books the agent announced
that his quartets we're all engaged for that
evening.
I have a capital man for singing and
talking he suggested. He would be as
good as a quartet
The three exchanged glnnces and the
spokesman shook his head. I'm afraid
that will not DO be declared. Its got
20 be a quartet
But for what / should have to charge
for a quartet can give you this man and
ching else; two acts for the price Of
one, the agent persisted.
The three drew Oh to a corner and there
was a lot Of whispering. Then the Gpokes-
man came forward
i am afraid that we will have to 20
somewhere else he said You see. this
dinner is given to man who il so deaf
would reach him, and we don't want TO
hurt his feelings by making him think
that we put on pAntomime man
A collector Of souvenir postal cards
has arranged the local part Of his series
in books 30 that they make an interesting
tour of New York. Beginning with the
views Of the hsrbor, he goes up through
the city 10 the Westcheeter border, giving
pictures Of all the leading features. He
complains, however, that not one OF the
publishers Of these cards has yet had enter
prise enough 70 feature the theatres, al
though many Of the new ones have such
attractive eEteriors and interiors. The
old playhouses, too, are lacking in the col
lection.
Jones IL a well known young lawyer who
some time ago established his home IN one
OF the nearby suburbs where a cot with an
acre and a COW is supposed to be the earthly
paradise. His Old chum Brown also Of
the bar, after hearing Of the rural delighte
for a long time consented finally TO spend
Sunday on the farm He was received
with all the hVnors and all the attractions
were shown 70 him.
At each meal he had to listen to eulogies
OF our own make" viands. He stood
patiently our own milk lettuce from that
frame you saw, peas od the vine IN the back
lot and so on until II got to Harry, ! can
recommend this chicken specially. raised
it myself.
Then the worm turned with a sad sweet
smile and remarked:
NO, Will l can't believe that. You've
only been here Little over two years.
The bicycle policemen would never have
20 watch the automobiles If all owners and
chauheurs were as careful as one Of the
Magistrates who drives a motor car himself
Whenever be sees policeman he slows
down and asks il he was going too fast.
a man in an automobile doesn't realize
half the time how fast be is going, says he
Ma gstrate, @and think the police ought
to be good judges.
This Ia the more notable when II Is con-
sidered that few policemen would arrest
Magistrate.
A stranger and a fountain pen did what
a mother failed TO do on one Of the Brooklyn
elevated trains the other day. The mother,
carrying in her arms little child, boarded
the train at the Bridge and as soon as the
journey began the youngster began to
cry and would not be Quoted. Finally,
a man, sitting on the opposite side OF the
car, arose Drawing a large fountain pen
from his waistcoat pocket, he asked the
woman 70 let him try a plan. She was
TAXING the child in his arms, the man
put the large end Of the pen N its mouth
The express lon on the baby's face i'm
mediately changed. IL shut its mouth
firmly on the pen and almost smiled as the
stranger sat down and began jogging the
child on his knee. The passen gers watched
with interest and smiles.
In less than Ave minutes that baby was
fat asleep. Then removing the pen eau
tiouslv from its mouth the stranger put the
child back in the mothers arms.
sAs for absentninded men, said the
youth with red hair, who had just been road
ing a Live Topic about one, tho best
lighting his cigar on the platform 81 car,
He had a silver match safe. When the cigar
was liz he threw away the match box and
carefully folded UP the wax match and put
Il in his pocket,
The cheapest place In New York 10 buy
a drink happens TO be Fifth avenue club
which boasts many milionaires among
its members, They pay less for food and
drink than the customers Of very modest
restaurants. The reason 10 that the club
Ia conducted only for the convenience Of
the members who are numerous enough
10 make such cheap rates possible. They
slso patroni1e the club restaurant and
order literally. The prices In clubs depend
on the amount Of money the members
! spend. And th's II happens that the club
! which has the largest dining room R1d
| The most extensive bill Of fare can supply
| IL members much more reasonably than
| tha club with very limited kitchen resources
and few 70 patronizs them.
A new kind Of flower hospital has recently
come into existence. II Is intended liter
ally only for floral patients and especially
those that cannot trace the place Of their
origin.