New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1905-12-15

part IN Lne DlOOOy SITuBBle. Oho Jay AiiNtA7 -
self besieged by a number OF persistent question:
ers the modest warrior consented to speak
WED get up in the mornin' at O'Clock ne
began. IAN have breakfast. Begin fghtn at o.
knock off at r. Begin shootin agtn at l, knock
off at an ate supper. turn in to sleep. Every
day the old thing; that's ALL
WITHOUT HIM.
rva br,derrou is generally the depressing <sa-
ure OF the modern weddng-dadies F1eio-I
Oh where is undiluted JOY
Divorced from disappointment?
The flies outside the ointment?
The Lady's field is wide to-day
And flow'ry paths she's treeding
But for the villain of the play
The Bridegroom at the wedding!
Then let the womans wit be shown,
Let tO Man n-V vaoate his stolen throne
To be by Queens succeeded.
Emancipated ladies, VOW
And show fallen idol how
No marriage rite You will allow
Unless performed without himi
When the reputabity OF punning is under dis
cussion it is we'll to bear in mind that the very
name of the Jest confesses to degree OF atroclty
TO pun according to The London Chronicle
is to pound" words, to beat them into forced con-
ditons; so the philologists believe He would
nm thee into shvers with his fist" says Therstes
in 'oTroilus and Cressida," meaning pnyslcaI
rounding" Pun is not slipshod development
of pound" but its original FORM the Anglo
Saxon verb being "punian." and pun or 'poun
having developed final ID just as ''soun be-
came sound" and as the illiterate turn gown
into '4gownd" Curiously enough pun ana
.no;,nd'' have no connection with punching a
mans head. which is simply punlshing' con-
tracted or with punching q ticket whlcn goes
hack to the Latin ''pungere' TO prick or puncture
More 1ghtA case was being tried Tbs E on tes
was offered in evidence Jury retired TO Try the
ev I1dge 1nresently)-what is the verdict?
Foreman of the Thirsty Jurym6o our non9[; ++ we
An odd advertisement appears in a German
newspaper. in which tempting ofrer Is maze IN
these words: Anybody who can prove that my
+anioca is damaging to health will at once receive
three packets gratis
she-Youre not like young Goodwin. He tried to
kiss me last night. and / told him to behave
sb SINS the the IDIOT actually illustrated
Bi Res--'O' ~ ''
The rural editor fourishes in England as well as
in this country. In account OF the Doncaster
(E,neIand) Art Clubs annual exhibition The Dom
caster Gazette" says: Miss = also goes IN TOT
nortraiture In hitting off her fathers head her
Intentions are good but the execution lacks very
much in artistic finish"
An 1nstanoe-'swomen dress to please the men
:aTo make other women envous you mean Why;
man ne S copd IN tel scent
Monthly.
The London Council now. for the first time. &C
cording to THE indianapolis News" is proposing
~ take upon itself the lighting Of the citys streets
Hitherto 1t has been a matter OF private enter
prise. In 171e the old Common Council thought
itself most PUBLIC spirited in passing an act by
which "all bousekeepers whose house. door or
gateway fronts lies next to any street, lane or
public passage or place of the said city shall in
averx dark night. that is. every night between the
second night after each full moon and the seventh
ntebt after each new moon set or hang out one or
ore lights with sufficient cotton wicks on penalty
of l shilling.
MANY birds have done duty for quail the
broler In San Francisco the other day the game
commissioners found sack of owls on the count
ers of a commission house The buyer Of French
restaurant was negotiating for their purchase. If
the trade had not been interrupted they would
have been transferred into ''broiled Quair' under
the hands of an expert chef. One man in Fresno
has made livelihood for several years by shipping
owls tn tickle the palates OF the San Francisco
snicures The ground squirrel. toe, is quail"
MANY sacks of these received in San Fran
cisco daily.
r,aneero,s Observation-Disclosures is cheap.
Benedict-For goodness sake. don't advertise 1t
L hsfe e. 30 gan
A 1veu known author. according TO Harper
weekly was once introduced to fascinating but
frivolous widow in Philadelphia. That evening the
fair one had been indulgtng IN tender "Reminiscences
~ the departed ''Ah!' she sighed, no other man
cen ever I'LL dear Jacks place. L loved him from
the bottom of my heart.
.rrr1,e suggested the writer, who was aware
:, the lady's weakness. but. remember there's
always room at the top!
,narnatural-"Do you think children should be
,ncngra ged TO believe in Santa Claus7'
.Syas answered the who never looks
,2s "a touch of the supernatural keeps them
icing too frank expressing Dissatisfaction
dth their Christmas gifts. "-(Washington Star