Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-12-09
SOME GOOD SHORT STORIES.
SMITH D. FRY.
BY SMITH D. FRY.
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES llnrnnrrl rnnrnnnlni6

| sneeting remark az man in trade whC
| couldn't deliver goods. Thercupun q
slender man CARRIED carelessly, said.
Give me the package. | am goinG
that way. and viii deliver il this attcr-
| noon
THE young man handed it over, and
| walked out Of the store. In the after
noon the tall, slender man drove up IN
buggy and delivered the small pack
age to the small man, and the latter
said
We'll, my good fellow, YOU have
been very clever about this. How much
do ! owe you for your tropbleY
Nothing at all sir. good day &C.
piled the tall man as he ,ightened the
rcins and started his horse.
But, my good fellow you must
give me your name and address, so that
| may do something for you some time,
exclaimed the dude
You are welcome 10 my name and
address was the answer j am John
Randolph Of Roanoke.
Col. John a. Joyce, the poet Is one
OF the most genial OF companions, a
lovable man in fact But there was
time when he was Stunned by his best
1905, however; Tor. on that date. the
gray-haired veteran took a temper
ance pledge and has kept II ever since.
When he was addicted to the habit Of
bibulOus conYiviality he was an ugly,
disagreeable, quarresOme. querulOus
fellow the exact opposite OF Col
Joyce normal and sober However,
whether sober or otherwise, he is al
ways a genius. epigrammatlc sonten-
tious, one evening IN Chamberlin's
once famous club room. reference was
made TO the barkeeper. and Joyce in
terrupted with:
You are no dialectician. or you
would not refer to that young man as
bar keeper. He is bartender. not
u bar keeper"
Il cannot see the difference" was the
reply
"Well. this is the difference. said
Joyce, He who maintains and sus-
tains Is the Keeper We drunken loaf
ers here are the fellows who sustain
and maintain this bar This young
man who waits on US and attends to
our alleged wants, il bartender. We
booty fools are the keepers
The father OF Senator Deliver, OF
Iowa. was Methodist preacher Of
great power. He lived TO a good old
age spending the last 10 years of his
life with his distinguished and affec-
Ionate son. He was a good story tell
er, nearly all Of his variations, how
ever being concerning churches and
sunday school episodes. One of them
was concerning the obnoxious fellows
who have themselves invited to 3D.
dress the children after the little ones
"a al
home, one Of these peripatetics talked
to the children for Is minutes about
the missionaries I'm India. Then he
talked for almost half an hour about
the missionaries in China. and.
stopping for little breathing spell, he
said:
And now, children | have told you
all about the poor dear little heather,
what more can | say2"
Please please. Mister exclaimed a
little girl in the front row, please, sir,
please say, Amen.
Mr.. Deliver also tells a story illus
trating the lack of diplomacy Of the av.
erage schoolhOy. When It comes 10
Fighting or lying, or playing marbles
Tor keeps the school boy Is an artist.
but never a diplomat Two boys were
= lNnB uuflnB recess, ana hptn We're
taken before the badly teacher. who ask
cd ilrst for the cause of The difficulty.
He said ! stole his knife ana | hit
him" said one little fellow, denantly.
never said nothin of the kind"
blubbered the other hoy. 81 said that
somebody stole my knife"
But YOU looked nc me and you
meant me. when you said IT, was the
reply in a defiant shout.
Tut. tut said the teacher you
nave no right 20 say he meant you,
Jimmy. If he did not use your name.
Now, II he We're to look at me and
say that somebody stole his knife.
would not suppose that he meant to
accuse me Of stealing his knife"
We'll, but You don't steal,' was the
discriminating reply.
Then he gave up the knife.