Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1905-04-17

Thomas W. Lawson tells of a friend
who has taken a trip up to the Maine
woods for a days hunting. The hunt
cr's time being limited. he wished to
crowd as many hours into day as was
possible. so he ordered the host at the
little backwoods hotel to call him at
430 in the morning.
Promptly at 430 he WAS walked from
:: sound sleep by thump Oh the door
of his room.
Well" he asked. sleepily. whats
the matter"'
IT'S half-past four" came the an
SWer.
"AlI right. I'll be right down." he
said, as he pulled the covers UP to his
chin for another little map. There was
silence for about five minutes. when he
was awakened once more by a terrible
chatter on his door.
whats the matter now" he asked.
thoroughly aroused.
you just sign this receipt
Sign what receipt -"
This receipt showing that I called
YOU at half-past four. You don't come
down ut o'clock and say l didn't call
you. Not if know it."
Once. as the story goes. two Irish
men were engaged in Il discussion.
when Pat asked Mike what socialism
was.
Well socialism is sort of an equal
division of property declared Mike.
What's mine is yours. and what's
yours is mine. That's the idea
- If you had s20O0,OOO asked Pat,
would you give mo one Million
~ would that said Mike. That's
according to my principles
IF YOU had two houses would you
give me one of them was Pats next
question. Mike insisted that he would.
And if you had two fine horses
would you give me one
Mike declared that he would follow
lis principles.
And if you had two goats would
you give me one of them? finally
asked Pat.
~ would not. I have them declared
the socialistic disciple"
And there is not in the books, he it
remembered in these days when SO
many men are pretending to be social
lists. a better definition of socialism
than that.
Shortly after his entrance into politi-
cal life Disraeli stood for Il certain
Middlescx borough in the conservative
interest. II was Il personally con-
Quoted" canvass. and. among others.
the future prime minister solicited the
vote and interest of wcll-to-do but
somewhat irasciblc farmer. who was
supposed to be yather doubtful in his
political convictions.
Vote for you" he shouted when Mr.
Dsraeli made known the object of his
call. why, Id vote for the devil
| sooner"
"Ah. quite So" said Mr.. Disraeli,
suavely. but i'm event of your friend
not standing. may l hope for your in
tercst New York Times.
"Yes. the papers referred to me as a
hero" said the drummer on crutches
| land 1 suppose l was and am one, but
| don't care to go through 1t again. The
cash reward is too small"
so you were a hero for CASH." was
asked.
well. / didn't set out to be. but il
| came 10 lndt. L NdS iodlllS -
town i'm Illinois when horse ran away
with two women. He was making for
an open sewer when / jumped in and
grabbed him and was dragged over a
| brick pile and through the mud and
| had a leg broken and a shoulder dlslo-
| Gated. | saved the women, one OF
whom was young, rich and handsome
and who ought to have been grateful
and married me. but who visited me In
| the hospital and looked down upon IN!
| bed of pain to say:
Poor fellow. If it hadn't been for
you we should surely have been killed
ard l want you to know how thankful
we are and how much we admire your
action.
| And then what happened" was
asked. assthe drummer seemed to have
got through.
| "And then she left 5O-cent piece
on the pillow and walked out and
don't suppose shall ever see hel
again i'm my life!"
Yes" said the wise-l0Oking man, ~