Danville intelligencer. [volume] (Danville, Pa.) 1859-1907, 1905-11-24
" Jernliah Grimes, Esq.

LIBERY ToNsHIP, Nov. 20, 1905.
DEER EDITuR:
The other mite Bill Giles, my
nabor, came down again. 1t wuz so
long since Bill he'd cum down that |
thought mebbe he mite be cross abot
sumthin. you no Bill is an eddicated
man. He takes awl them thear
nusepeppers over to Denvil. The
'telligencer, the Denvil Morning Star,
the dummycrat an the Jem. He toIo
me wun time thet the Dummycrat
wuz gettin so dogasted poor thet the
ole woman couldn't bid fire with it
no more, and he wood stop takin it
sum of these hear fine daze. Sez |,
Bill, | am glad to see you'once more.
Did you here ennything abot poletics
lately =? you bet | did, Jerry, sez he,
they hev lected too Publican COM
misioners over to Denvil. Haint it
too bad? you see the way it wuz.
Sum of them thear young understrap-
per poltshuns tried to pick Ole Hick-
ory an put him in bag befoar he
.wuz ripe. They sed "wat the ell do
we care abot LEGALITY, so long as we
get wat we want" Sumtimes we
doan git wat we want ennyhow.
We'll, Ole Hickory he feeld awful bad
abot the way he wuz used, then he
got crost and vowed vengence. Sez
he, by me sowl, eff | doant get in a
smack bclo the belt in the mex six
months, kin put me down for lyar.
So Ole Hickory he laid low an kept
kind of quiet like, you must be quiet
like in politics or you may git INTO
trouble-sumtimes you will git into
trouble cnnyhow.
Wen the day cum for the fife
which wuz Nov. 7th, Ole Hickory
cum out in fine form, he he'd biceps
on him like pork barrel, and an
ominous squint in hiz eye, an it was
plane to be seen thet there wuz gone
to be troable. | kant give you the
fite in rounds, but wen the time cum
for gitten down to bizness, Ole Hick-
ory got in a punch on the solar
plexus thet made them howl. 1t was
a reglar old Fitzsimmoner. Billy
Vest and Horass Blou, who were sit
ten in the front seats near the ring,
got bad hurt. we CESS it must hev bin
the 'lectricity, or sumthin of thet
kind. Poor Horass, he will hev to
stay in bed for a long vile, an take
bitter ii-irk too. The Doctor sey
wen he gifts better he will not be able
to wurk at his ole job no more, but
will hev to do lite wurk all mex sum-
mer. Billy Vest hez harder con-
stitushon, en- can stan the raps better,
but the doctor sez he he'd not better
wurk at the Coanty Slictcrship fur
three yers ennyhow. But he kin go
on wrtin briefs an eddicatin country
squires an the like.
You see, jerry, sez Bill, wear the
mistake was made wuz wen they at
tempted to pick Ole Hickory befoar
he wuz quite ripe. Now i'll lay you
two to wun thet Ole Hickory will be
commissioners clerk. Won't thet be
Il nauscous doas for the understrappers
to take?
l won't say nuthin abot that thear
teller grean this time. He is kinder
quiet like now and | will not ster him
up. Beside he mite put me to jale,
en- George Mires sez thear are too
menny in jale Sumtimes already,
Yours trooly,
JERMIAH GRIMES.
"a remarkable coincidence in the
life of jeremiah Grimes is, that dur
ing the past week, several have made
inquiry at our Office regarding this
individuals existence and where ''he
is now a. Then comes our Straw
berry Ridge CORES pondent in rev
alalion Of recent dream, and jerry
himself turns up ut his old home.
He never explains his absence, which
his friends are very soIicitous of, for
in his last communication he said he
would appear the following week if
he were not put to Jail, aud jerry is a
man Of yaracity, too Ed
Ritter GirtOn.
NNol,ngIov o,,,nirrr Nnyon,lo, 90