Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1905-05-21

NWOIa
they've had enough. and their man APP
pears on the porch and announces that 'tea
is ready
THAT amt nothin' to the two what's
Twin near me-" retorted the sandy person
who started the conversation. Both of
ems young enough to be going to school.
but they both got wives, and they've
rented place by the lake for the sum-
mer. The two OF EMS about twelve feet
tall, one being five feet and the other
seven. whereabouts. Well, sir the tall
Teller came down In the with me one
morning. and. says he, Friend. | want to
ask yer advice. We've planted a barrel
of seed in our garden across the way
from you. but there's nothin' doin' so far
as sprouts is concerned. / see your gar
den is pretty fine. How do you do it%
We'll, sir. | hardly had the heart TO do
it, but told that big blue-eyed boy that
the only way to get early crops in gar
den was to put a mustard plaster over
each seed. l told him-and with straight
face, toO-that mustard plaster would
draw the sprouts right up to the surface
and that he would have the finest crop Of
beans and radishes he ever saw.
He didn't laugh, and neither did l. and
I forgot all about it until the next morn
ing. And the next morning. well. sir
that garden across the way looked as If
Red Cross Hospital corps had been admin
isterng first aid to the injured There
was the finest acre of choice mustard
piasters that ever Matched out in the
state of Maryland.
II didn't see the big fellow for a week.
| and all the time those mustard plaster
| patches remained In the garden. Then one
morning he climbed in the 7:3i car AMI
began talking crops again. asked him
| how about the mustard plaster scheme.
and he allowed IT wasn't working to
perfection So l spoiled the game oy max
ing another suggestion. | told him 20 take
a corkscrew and get busy on each seed
| like It was the neck of a bottle. Well. sir.
| the boy farmer looked me over ike he
| thought | was foolin'. but / think he
wouldn't have caught on II a .lriea-up cid
| farmer I'm the seat in front of us hadn't
| laughed out loud"
| The crusty looking person admitted that
| that was pretty bum way in which 10
| till the SOIL and he ventured the assertion
that the altitudinous gentleman never
would make roaring success rs truck
gardener But the crusty looking person
| was not to be outdone.
| There's one Of these amateurs livln'
| next to me-" he began, who took to the
| country last summer. He GO a ton of
| vegetable seed from the Agricultural De-
partment and bought another ton and a
barrel of seed potatoes from one OF the
| commission merchants in town He pest
| cred and fused with that garden all sum
mer and outside of half dozen radishes.
nothing came up except the potatoes. But
when the potato plants fiourIshed along
came the potato bug, and the amateur had
his troubles. He came to me and wanted
| to know what could be done TO get rid o.
| the bugs It was like feeding April-foGl
candy to an infant. 1 suggested that he
| take two blocks of wood: mark one OF them
| No. l and the other No 2, and taking them
| to the garden. should place each bug on
| block No. 1 and swat It energetica!y with
! block No 2. 1 expected to get the merry
| ha ha. but the chap thanked me with
most serious face and changed the subject.
THE next afternoon 1 saw the poor tel
! low out in the broiling sun. leaning over his
potato plants as busy as real sure-enough
| farmer | got my field glasses aad dis
covered that my friend was hammcring
away with that new-fangled potato bug
eXtermnator disposing OF the troublesome
beasts one at a time. l watched him Tor
] an hour and he gave 1t up as a bad JoD.
He never mentioned potato bugs again To
me. and l have also avoided the subject
x
The car stopped at Pierce Mil road 20
take on a couple of frail individuals, and
the sandy person took another turn al me
conversation.
Il didn't finish tellln' you about that pair
of farmers out my way sald ne ailu
when | do I'll leave IL to anybody IN the
ear If they alnt the worst ever. The snort
chap being nearer the ground, has charge
OF wedding the garden. Wei, sir, we've
been haYin' a heap of garlic IN the neids
lust north of Chevy Chase lake. ana me
short chap had encountered the taste OF II
i'm the milk He didn't like it bit. SO
when he discovered in the garden lot OF
sprouts that resembled garlic he proceeded
TO dig them up by the roots and cast them
away where they would dry up in the sun
shine Every day he examined the garden
he found more of the dreadful sprouts ana
each day he uprooted them and cast them
away The big fellow had planted the
garden and it was not until he wondered
what had become of all the choice onions
that he. found out his short friend had an
tad theT he
muchly despised garlic. Now they get
their onions in market.
-
Speaking of not knowing a rake from
garden hoe, / heard a good one on the
big fellow the other day. 1t seems he got
a real farmer from somewhere in the VI
cinIty to plow up the ground he had set
aside for his garden. When the plowman
had completed the job he told the big fell
low he would return the next day and
bring a harrow With which TO Dreak up
the sod
"'You need not bring a harrow all the
way over here declared the man with the
height. We have a harrow In our barn.
1t was there when We rented the place, and
I guess We use it, Consequently the
real farmer returned without his harrow
and repaired at once to the barn.
1" Here is our harrow said the big fell
low. pointing to a machine with two big
long, tooth-like arrangement attached TO
the side. According to reports. the farmer
nearly had faintin' SPELL
That aint a harrow he said to the
amateur That's a moving machine
1.-The farmer had to go four miles to get
his harrow. but when landed on the
country place of this interesting pair l
am telling you about, the big fellow made
study of 1t, not to get fooled again.
A few days later he invited a friend to come
out to the country for dinner. and as usual
with commuters he had to do some
shopping at the market He took his
friend down to the Center Market, by way
of the commission houses and farm i'm
plement stores Louisiana avenue. Just
to show his friends that he was a full
nedged farmer and knew all about the
para phernafia for filling the soil. he point
ed proudly at a big red corn-planter and
said There. that's harrow"
END of the route" yelled the conductor
the reached 18th street and New
York avenue.