Evening star., 1905-11-04

ture of the breakfast, our member has .
couple OF soft-boiled eggs-two eggs all at
once, mind you!-alongside his plate. And
don't you think he Isn't .gioaty about
those two eggs at breakfast He knows that
he's the only egg guy at the table, and
that all the rest of are rocking and
raging with jealousy OF him and his eggs,
plate. fresh-broken and hot. he casts a
sort OF Mephistophelian leer around the
table. and then he proceeds TO pepper and
salt his eggs, and to stir them with ms
spoon In clattery. ostentatious way that's
meant to invite the attention of all hands
10 those eggs of his.
And then on the days when there's roast
veal-sort o pinksh boarding house veal.
you know the kind-for dinner, those OF us
that don't like pinke- winkle veal, roasted
or any other way. have got to get along
without meat or go out somewhere and
STAKE ourselves elsewhere to a meat feed.
fheres no other alternative for US. In the
iahoiady view, IL We don't like veal, that's
our iauit ana our business. and none OF
ners. 1. Tor instance. have been turning
my veal down and sending IL back un-
touched for years and years. and the
landiady Knows that don't like veal and
can't eat it.but it's put before me every
time yeafs the dinner meat. all the same,
and the landladys attitude is that IL don't
like II can lump II. so there,
Now. our member doesn't like veal. eith-
er. But dye think he gets II put before
veal? Because II you do you've never lived
! In boarding house with n member. that's
all. Nix on the veal for the hayer. When
there's veal for dinner, and those OF us
that don't like 1t have got to SIT there and
look at 1t in front OF us with an aversion
that we're obliged to dissembie for fear
the landlady might catch sight OF our sour
looks. why, at the same time get our
veal. the member gets a dish neatly covered
over with three four smoking fragrant
lamb chops, just or the broiler. or a big
hunk of tenderloin steak that makes our
mouths water. and then the hanky-pank
leers around at US some more I'm that cum
ming. triumphant way of his. and jabs his
knife into the kind o. meat that we never
get. but that we're always dreaming about
and We have to I'LL up on mashed potatoes
and canned stewed tomatoes and bread I
guess that isn't agonizing!
The Elusive Towels.
And the towel gag. too! I reckon you
know, maybe. what perpetual fight must
be waged to get towels In some Washing
ION boarding houses. There's no use buck
ing about the absence OF towels either
The iandlady's always there with some sort
or an excuse-the washerwoman couldn't
do EN- up on account OF the rain, or the
upstairs girl just forgot to put em in the
rooms. or the boy that was bringing the
tower wash got run over by a brewery
wagon. or something. Whatever the ex-
cuse may be. you know what II means to
get your face all lathered and soaped up,
ana then, when you want to wipe, and
look around and find no towels to have TO
go digging Into one Of the bureau drawers
ana pull up some OF your clothes to dry
yourseit on, or II you don't think OF that,
Try 10 get the wet on your face with the
handy.
If you don't know what it is to try to
wipe your wet face of with the aid OF a
cretonne portiere or a piecf of swiss cur-
tain. you're not hep to the boarding house
game as it's carried on In some parts of
inform you. "
But does the member ever have to 90 sby
on towels? Not so that you could perceive
II with the assistance Of 12.OOO-candle-
power searchiight! 1 never pass by the
members room, on my way up or down
stairs. that / don't see the upstairs girl
walking into his room with a hull armful
OF towels-all kinds o. towels: towels with
red borders. towels with fringe towels
plain and hemstitched, great big bath tow
els, towels enough to make a patched main
tent for Touring circus. When the girls
not packing towels into the members room
she's hanging 'em on his door knob or
throwing 'em over his transom, but how
ever he gets em, he grabs out enough tow
els to dry regiment, while the rest of us
are fooling around trying to dry the suds
of ourselves with the aid OF the pillow
shams.
And that's the answer about the towels
The member gets 'em all, and It's us to do
the best We can trying to dry ourselves
with the Splasher tackled back of our wash
stand.
Member Gets All the Heat.
THE furnace heat is all for the member
too. All of the hot air pipes leading to the
rest of the rooms are choked of SOS the
members room'll be at temperature like
that of the hot room of Turkish bath all
the time. When the rest of are huddled
members got all of his front windows wide
open to the wintry blasts SOS to let some
of the heat out. When the member goes
back home for the Christmas holidays the
furnace virtually goes out of business al
together. The landady tells us that the
CRATE has let down or the crown sheet has
melted or the cylinder head blown off or the
hetupicus gone to pieces, necessitating thor
pleted by the time the member gets back
from the Christmas vacation but never II
minute before.
What's the use? The members 1T In
our boarding house, that's all, and kicking
isn't going to do any good.
He'll be along presently. Landlady got
letter from him yesterday announcing
his early appearance, and when / got back
to my room, after the show last night.
| found that my easy chair was gone. Up
stairs girl had swiped it, at the landladys
order to put 1t In the members room. And
I'm so craven, so ab1ect. after years of liy-
ing In the same boarding house with a mem
ber that | didn't make ary kick bun just
stood for IT.
Modern Life