The semi-weekly messenger. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1897-1908, 1905-10-27


fault:
The battlefields won by u fore
fathers with their vaIor and blood are
sllsaaaeriag IN the sunshine OF peace.
and from them you have reapsd the
corn AMI pumpkins and sqcashes see
on every ham,. From the field where
George Washington drew his sword in
defense Of liberty core these fat hogs.
From the field where Paul Jones laid
| down his life that America might be
| free rot la 81 driven this Durham bull.
From the field where Daniel Webster
! shouted for freedom rs he pressed on
At the head Of his troops yoa have gath
cred the Early Rose potatoes-these
mammoth ear-ots-theSe y
stop. Mr.. Bowser. Stop
"Ncil, what Is it,
"You must certainly change that. ]
don't want 10 find fault. but yon can't
have Paul Jones fighting on land"
And why the devil can't T.
Because lie was Il sailor-a sen
| fighter. You have Daniel Webster at
the head of his troops, but he was nev
er even a soldier. You'd he picked up
In a minute on those things"
"By the Lord Harry. woman" ssid
Mr.. Bowser as he flushed red aud
white. but are you telling NE that |
| don't know us much as the average boy
ten years oll:"
NO. 1'm not. I'm simply telling you
that you have got things mixed u.
You know better. OF course. but You
are sometimes absentminded."
Never in this world do | get things
mixed up. Never in this world am |
absentminded. Mrs. Bowser. you have
insulted me-
There was a bit of doubt in his tones
as he picked up bis manuscript notes
again, iourished his arm and went on:
when Robert Fulton arose in his
place in congress and declared that ag-
riculture was the bulwark of liberty
men smiled at him, but you have only
to ooh around you today TO see what a
truism he gave us. Look at those
thrashing machines, those steam boil
ers, those windlniils, those reapers and
and tllen turn
M. 1.oIrscr. will you let me say a
vord:" interrupted Mrs. Bowser.
What is it now:'
You are not quite right about two
tllings in that paragraph. Robert Full
ton never arose in his seat in o
gresS."
Put | say he did"
y don't see how he could, as he was
never a member of that body. You
probably meant to say Calhoun or
Clay
81 probably didn't mean to say any
thing of the kind, This is the third or
fourth time you have flung insults into
my face, and l am done"
But you must not make such mis-
takes You speak of agriculture being
the bulwark of liberty. and then you go
on to mention nothing but manufac-
lures. If you make such slips rs these
before a crowd you will be almost boot
ed at. Now go on We will fill in new
names later on"
Madam. there will be~no going on
and no filing" said Mr.. Bowser with
great dignity as he came out Of the
grand stand.
But why?"
Because / am no fool. I may be
baldheaded, but l know when I am in
suited"
"You are a strange man. l was mere
ly telling you where YOU were wrong
about names and things"
You telling me where | was wrong.
Now listen to me. In half an hour |
will prove that you don't know your
A B C's. I'll show you that l am right
and YOU are wrong in every criticism
J you have made"
We'll. let it go that | am wrong.
| Can't we go riding on the ear this
evening""
Don't attempt to dodge the issue,
madam. You have made certain state
ments. | go to disprove them. When
| they have been disproved. which they
certainly will be. | shall suggest that
| our respective lawyers have a little
| talk"
With thai he made her a stiff bow
| and walked down the hall and out
| doors. He had been very decided In
| his talk, but at the same time he doubt
ed himself. He didn't like to go to his
family druggist, but when he failed to
find the butcher or the plumber in he
sauntered into the drug store with a
remark about the weather and finally
| got around to say:
Say, doe, just who and what was
Daniel Webster / may have got him
mixed up with some n else"
why. Daniel was q statesman" was
the reply.
And who was Paul Jones!"
"One Of the greatest sea fighters
| America ever had"
And who-who"- continued Mr..
Bowser. but the druggist interrupted
him with:
by thunder. Bowser. but what do
| You want to keep this up so long for?
Your wife knows more In a minute
than you do in a day. and why not