The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1905-10-05

T. RMHiGglH83
MHY
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We LEAD lIlE CHURCH CHOIR ON sUNDAG.
truth in it. AS a matter of fact, we
lead the church choir on Sunday fore.
noon and assist in the Sunday school
afterward. and we have no time to be
bad, even if we wanted to.
The paragraph going the rounds to
the effect that our mother-in-law died
under suspicious circumstances gets
wabbly in the knees when we state
that we are still an old bachelor and
never had a mother-in-law to kill off
We have not shot and wounded three
different members of the Giveadam
Gulch common council within the last
year, as stated in a Denver paper. We
simply on one occasion split Alderman
Einnegan's ear with a bullet to make
him understand that he was out Of or
der.
1t has now been definitely ascertain
ed that the man who was lynched at
Blue Grass valley last March was a
William Scott of Iowa, who had come
out here to seek his fortune and COB
bled a horse as a beginning. 1t is well
enough that William should have been
identified, but we can't see how it is
going 30 help his case any.
\ travelling fakir who came into this
neighborhood four weeks ago and sold
his liver pads for a dollar apiece and
sang the hymn I'm the Sweet By and
By" with tears in his eyes, has been
found dead near Rocky Ford. He Ell
Their sang too sweetly or his pads were
fraud.
According to an item published in a
st. Paul journal, we, as postmaster,
have driven inquirers for mail out of
the office at the muZzle of a pistol.
According to the truth, we even get up
at midnight to sell a two cent stamp
or hand out letters, and the only per-
sons ever fired at were those who had
fired at us through the general delivery
window.
1t is now three weeks or more since
any one pulled a gun and tried to shoot
the hands off the postofIice clock, and
we are living in hopes that the reform
will last several months to come. We
are prepared for surprise party. how
ever, and shall shoot as straight in re-
turn as we know how
We haven't said anything about the
circulation of the Kicker for the last
four weeks, but advertisers can send
in their favors with the full assurance
that the figures are crowding the bill
lion mark very closely. There are
times when we hesitate to lie as to ex-
act figures.
During the repairs going on at the
Hellso Opera House for the last fort
DiUb+ ovor roo b11lIa+c bova boon ,,ici-od
out of the plaster and woodwork. Civ
ilization is coming this way, but it will
be some time yet before the boys sur-
render their privilege of shooting their
applause all over the house
Some unknown person in Nebraska
has gone to the trouble of writing us Il
letter to say that death is on our trail
and that we won't live out half our
days, and a postal card from Utah
warns us that our time limit has been
let at Oct 10. We always like to have
something in prospect, and our thanks
are due to both writers.
The editor and proprietor of the Blue
Grass Herald is said to be missing, and
there is fear that he has been eaten up
by bear He may have got himself
lost in the hills, but we do not believe
that any bear in this territory would
tackle a man as homely as Jamerson
Even bears have feelings.
NJ. QUAD.