davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1905-03-31
What He Asked For.

II say, Mahlsticque, old fellow, >
cried Dauber. bursting into the studio
where his brother artist was at work
Il suppose you don't happen to have q
flyer that's of no use to you?"
Il won't say that haven't, old boy
replied Mahlsticque, cheerily. Lets
have look. He unlocked a drawer
rumaged in it for moment, and then
produced crisp IS bill.
Here you are. my son." he said
handing it to the delighted Dauber
''Take it with my blessing and don'i
spend 1t in dissipation"
Exit Dauber, bristling with thanks
Twenty minutes later he re-entered
bristling with profanity. Here, 1 say
you Observation-Disclosures son of E
gum" he shouted, "that flyers bad!"
u know it is" replied Mahlsticque
calmly.
"Know it isl" bawled the infuriatet
borrower: then what the deuce die
you lend it to me for?"
STEADY. lad. steady" said the othe,
soothingly; "don't get excited. Yo,
asked me If I'd got a flyer that was o.
no use to me, and gave you one.
can assure you that it's absolutely n,
use to me whatever. You're welcome
to-" But Dauber was gone.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1905-03-31
What the Dentist Saya.

Toledo. Ohio, March 27th-(special)
Harry T. Lewis, the we'll known den
fist of COZ Sumit street, this city, is
telling of his remarkable cure of Kid
ney Disease by using Dodd's Kidney
Pills.
Il was fiat on my back and mus,
say had almost given up all hope
OF ever getting any help" says DR..
Lewis,
my kidneys had troubled me TO,
years. The pains in my back were Sc
we're and had to get up several times
at night. tried different medi.
.cines but kept on getting worse till
| was laid up.
Then a friend advised me to try
Dodd's Kidney Pills and in about two
weeks started to improve. Now I
am glad to admit am cured and l
cannot praise Dodd's Kidney Pills too
highly" &
If you take Dodd's Kidney Pills
when your kidneys first show signs of
being out of order you will never have
Bright's Disease, Diabetes, Dropsy,
Gravel or Rheumatism.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1905-03-31
A Smart Retort.

How that prince of humorists, Mark
Twain, neatly scored off a well-known
American lawyer, who endeavored to
be witty at his expense, is related by
the writer of some recent recollections
of the author of "The Innocents
Abroad"
1t was at society dinner that Mark
Twain was called upon to make a
speech, which he did in his own ini1a-
table manner. On seating himself the
lawyer arose and, thrusting his hands
into his trousers pockets, as was his
habit, laughingly inquired of those
present:
Doesn't it strike this company us a
little unusual that a professional hui
morist should be funny?"
When the laughter that greeted this
sally had subsidized, Mark Twain
drawled out:
Doesn't it strike this company as a
little unusual that a lawyer should
have his hands in his own pockets?"
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1905-03-31
Power of Gold.

In one of our Eastern cities GER
tain family suddenly found themselves
at the top notch of wealth and pros
rerity. They then began to seek for
the secondary requirement of culture
A most excellent master was engaged
to instruct their only daughter on the
piano. His patience being taxed to
the uttermost, the master complained
to the young woman's mother.
Madam, l cannot teach your daugh-
ter longer"
And why not? Doesn't my daugh.
ter study? l will make her study"
1T ees not Eat. persisted the old
man. 81 cannot teach her. She has
no talent"
"Is that all?" his patroness replied.
II am rich. Here is my pocketbook.
Go over to New York and buy her
some"
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1905-03-31
our Saints.

From the eternal shadow rounding,
All insure and starlight here. 81.
Voices of our lost ones sounding,
Bid us be Of heart and cheer,
Through the silence, down the spaces.
gs falling on the inward ear.
Know we not our dead are looking; ,
Downward, as in sad surprise,
/ All our strife Of words rebuking
With their mild and earnest eyes?
Shall we eFieye the holy angels. shall we
cloud their blessed skies?
Let VS. draw their mantles Ger us,
Z Let us do the work before us "
Calmly bfHNely.i awe MApys -. !.
Ere the long night silence c0meth, and
with US It II not day! ss,S
| IN " John q. Whittier.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1905-03-31
Domestic Customs Of ma,avs,

Marriage among the Malays is large
iy matter of dollars and cents; still
the men are cruelty jealous of thei,
wives as long as their women are at
tractive. A Malay will wage a cruel
war if he finds another man bestowine
too much affection on the woman he
cares for. If a woman gets separated
from her husband, through chance O:
any other cause, she starts out in
search of husband No. 2. A Malay
woman married to an Englishman was
asked by a friend why she was no:
more devoted to her husband. With
out a moments hesitation she madf
answer, "He has no more money 70.
me-"
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1905-03-31
A 4ao-AcRE FARM YIELDS
rs PER CENT PROFIT IN A YEAR.
What Mercer County (ohio) Farmer
Received from One Years Crop.

What Mercer County (ohio) Farmer
Received from One Years Crop.
Extracts from an interesting letter
from p. H. Rynhard, Of Starbuck,
Manitoba, Canada, gives an excellent
idea of the prosperity of those who
have gone from the United States to
Canada. He says:
II bought, August, 1903, 4s0 acres
of land, paying $4,000 for it. We
threshed 1913 bushels of wheat and
between 1000 and 1900 bushels Of
oats and barley from 200 acres. But
part of the wheat went down before
filling and was not harvested except
for hay! The crop was worth at
threshing time, $4,000. Besides 100
acres laying idle except timothy
meadow, which is not included in this
estimate. Counting the value of the
product and the increase of value Of
land will pay me more than rs per
cent on the investment. Two broth
ers in the same neighborhood bought
$50 acres each six years ago. They
have not done a single thing to this
land except to fence it and break and
cultivate about bne-half of it. Har-
vested last year % bushels wheat per
acre. This year ~ bushels per acre.
They can get any day $25 per acre.
These are only few of many hun
dreds of such chances. 1t looks like
boasting, but truth is justiiable and
the world ought to know it, especial
ly the home-seeker. know of quite
few farmers that have made for
tunes in from 10 to 20 years, retired
with from $4,000 to 100000.
Writing concerning another district
in the Canadian West, s. L. Short
says:
Dear Sir-I have to inform you
that have Just returned from the
Carrot River Country in Saskatche-
wan, where I located land OF the very
finest black vegetable loan, which I
am proud Of, and will move in the
spring. Farmers are still blowing
there. A mild climate and beautiful
country to behold. Cattle are fat and
running outside. Wood and water
good. Saw oats weighing AZ pounds
to bushel. Potatoes large and well
ripened; also wheat that brought
there 81 cents. The country exceed.
ed, my expectations. Saw oats in
stock, thicker on the ground than ap.
pears in many Of the illustrations
sent out in descriptive pamphlets.
have been in many western states,
but the soil excels any / ever saw. :"
e The Canadian Government Agents
1T different points report tint the. en-
quitisss 4 Tor! xtnre; ana railroad.
ratss.t Acsas u VvasternifS Canada ;afs
the greatest II tho history q thsir
work l 81 a Is "a M ai IN
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1905-03-31
z MYSTERIES IN TWO OILS.
Rhodium and cumtn Have Strange At
traction for Fishes and Animals.

traction for Fishes and Animals.
"The oil of rhodium is supposed to
have Strange attraction. for fish,"
said an angler. This oil costs 81 for
a tiny vest pocket vial. Nevertheless
the most poverty-stricken of bait fish
ermen won't hesitate to buy it when
he wants to make a big haul OF fish.
II believe it is true that the. oil of
rhodium attracts fish as no natural
bait will do. l believe that with a
crop of oil of rhodium on his worm
an angler can increase his catch of
fish skiold or sevenfold. The fact is.
have had pretty good indirect proof
that this is So
THE mysterious oil of rhodium has
In Oil OF cumin mysterious brother.
You have heard of horse tamers-of
those strange men who in a few min
utes will make dangerous and ungov.
ernable nag as gentle and tractable
as lap dog? Well, it is said that
these men tame their horses with oil
OF rhodium and oil of cumin sprinkled
on their fingers. They let the horse
sniff the two oils and at once the an.
imals ferocity goes out of it and it be.
comes quiet and kindly in an instant
Il should like to know just what
the oils of rhodium and cumin are and
l should like to know whether they
really have the powerful effect on
horses and on fish that they are said
to have M Ona whom hoCo oon
suited, though, can give me any direct
and personal evidence about the mat
ter"
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1905-03-31
STATE OF ONO, CIrY OF TOLEDO,
InOAa lNo11Nrx Do

STATE OF ONO, CITY OF TOLEDO, l..
LUCAS COUNTY. %
FRANK J. CHENEY makes oath that he 10 senior
partner OF the firm OF +. j. CHENEY e. Co., doing
business in the City Of Toledo. County and State
aforesaid. and that said firm will pay the sum OF
ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS for each and every
case OF CATARHA that cannot DO cured by the Of
dALL's CArARRH CUBE.
FRANK j. CHENEY.
Sworn to before me and subscribed in my pres.
snce. this 9Th day OF December, A. d. 1886.
1...1I A. " se "as11 rvs.,e.
n allie Catarrh Cure Is taken internally and acts
directly on tho blood and mucous surfaces Of the
system. Send for testimonials. free.
F. j. CHENEY & CO., Toledo, O..
Sold by all Druggists 75c
Take Halls Family Pills for constipation.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1905-03-31
MARyELS OF AMERICA
SCENES OF BEAUTY UNEouAEED
ON THE EARTH.
No Wondrous Sight Shown the Trav.
eler Abroad But Can Be Duplicated
Here in Our Own Land-A Few In.
stances Taken from Long List.

Wnen Payne wrote There's No
Place Like Home" he gave poetic en-
preston to the love he bore toward
the ingle-nook, more precious than
temples or palaces" What flowers of
rhetoric could approach in power of
assertion, these five little monosylla-
bic words, There's No Place Like
Home"-to gainsay which were impos.
sible!
1t is the great privilege of Ameri-
cans to be able, without hyperbole, to
apply them to travel, for what is there
in any part of the habitable globe more
fraught with interest, instruction,
education refreshment of mind and
body and uplifting of soul than nature
has provided, with hand so lavish, for
the delectation of those having the
good fortune to dwell in this goodly
, land?
Would he see Riviera? We have
several on the shores of the azure
! waters both of the gulf and the Pacific,
far distancing that laved by the Medit-
erranean.
Does he pine for snow-capped noun.
tains? Let him repair to the plains
whence Pixies Peak, Mt. Logan and
our other great elevations rear their
hoary submits into cloudland.
Would he witness majestic cata.
ract? There is but one without rival,
the imperial Niagara-in the chain of
our great lakes, most turbulent of
links.
| Neither Nile, Niger, nor Gauges
great rivers though they are-are COM
parable to our own Mississippi, we'll
named "The Father of Waters" Our
peerless Hudson excels in picturesque
effects the Wanted Rhine.
| What of the beauties of the Golden
! Gate, on whose shores sits enthroned
queenly San Francisco, pronounced
I peerless among cities by a much-trav.
eled European prince Of imperial
blood
| Where is there. even in miniature
anything to vie with that earthly para
disc, the Valley of the Yosemite; what
to compare with the deep and rugged
gorge through which passes to the sea
the impetuous Colorado river?
The Mammoth Cave of Kentucky
one of the worlds wonders, is as yet
but partially explored.
Why, then, travel abroad, while ali
these and vastly more than can be here
:. enumerated, remain unseen, at home
Are not ALBANIA and Pharpar, rivers
of Damascus, better than all the
waters Of Israeli" said Naaman the
Syrian of old, when ordered by the
prophet to betake himself to the Jor
dan for healing. Who can help admir-
ing his pride of country and robust
patriotism? Most worthy are they Of
emulation.
Be it for health or recreation, there
is no grander travel field than We have
at home.-Travel.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1905-03-31
Simple EnouuF1,

First Professor-Do you know, |
find 1t difficult to remember the ages
of my children.
Second Professor-I have no such
trouble. l was born twenty-three hun
dred years after Socrates, my wife
eighteen hundred years after the
death of Tiberius Caesar, our son
John two thousand years after the en-.
trance into Rome of Tiberius Sempro.
MUS Gracious for the re.enactment OF
the 'leges Liciniae,"' and our Amanda
fifteen hundred years after the begin.
ming of the ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS is
perfectly simple, you see.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1905-03-31
MISS bull RECOVERS
FEARFUL DECLINE OF STRENGTH
COMPLETELY ARRESTED.
Medical Skill Had Almost e. ha listed Itself
in Vain Attsmpts to Relieve Hef-A
Remarkable Reault


in Vain Attempts to Relieve Hef-A
Remarkable Result.
The recovery Of Miss Gertrude L. Bull
Is Of great interest to the medical world.
A very bad cough followed a severe at
tack of pneumonia. It seemed impossi-
BILE to break it up or to restore her
strength, which had been sadly under
mined. In spite of the best efforts of
the doctors and the use of several adver.
tised modes Of treatment her condition
daily grew more serious. She finally
discontinued all medicine and gave her.
self up to despair.
What was your condition at this
timer she was asked.
my stomach was SO weak I could not
keep food down. I suffered from con-
slant nausea. Ny kidneys were in ter.
rible condition. Ny feet and ankles were
swollen SO badly that it panied me even
to stand on them. I was very bilious.
My heart was in bad shape SO could
not go up and down stairs or stand any
exertion or sleep. in natural position"
&C. 1t seems a wonder that you should
ever have recovered. How did it
happen?"
"You may well call it a marvel, but
DR.. Williams Pink Pills wrought it.
None Of my friends thought I could live
many months longer. My parents had
no hope. Just then a pamphlet adver-
Using DIR. Williams Pink Pills for Pale
People was thrown in our door. 1t was
great event for me. These pills saved
me from the grave. Withina week from
the time began to take them felt bet.
ter, and in three months was entirely
well. cannot praise DR.. Williams
Pink Pills too highly and I dearly hope
that my experience may bring good to
>ome other sufferers"
Miss Bull, who was so remarkably
cured, resides at Union Grove, Illinois.
DR.. Williams Pink Pills act Immediately
on the blood, purifying and enriching it..
In all facilitating diseases, such as
lung troubles, grip, fevers, and in all
cases in which the system is thoroughly
run down, these pills perform wonders.
They are sold by all druggists through
out the world. A valuable booklet on
diseases of the blood, will be sent free
to any one who applies for it to DR.. Will
iams Medicine Co.. Schenectady. N. 7.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1905-03-31
PATENTS.

List of Patents Issued Last Week to
Northwestern inventors.
Reported by Lothrop & Johnson, pat
ent lawyers, Oil and 912 Pioneer Press
building. st. Paul. Mimi: Victor Bal
ley. Hallock, Mimi, threshing ma
chine; Francis Burge, Linton. N. D.,
calf weaver; Tobias Clementson. Du-
luth,, MINI, horse or cattle blanket;
Julius Dobberstein, Alma City, Mimi,
draft equalizer; Peter Geyerman,
Brewster, Mimi. telephone call; Nor
man La Clair, st. Paul. Mimi, nailless
horseshoe; Josepho Offerman, Mime.
apolis, Mimi, wrench; Simeon F..
Pierce, st. Paul, Mimi, boiler furnace.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1905-03-31
Sweet Nlaht.

Sweet moon, shine on her window
through the night.
To show her God has set gentle light
Between her days.
Sweet sleep. enfold her softly where she
q lies
And steal away insomnia from the eyes
Z, y Which many praise.
Sweet dreams. which visit those whose
sleep is sweet. 8
Come 10 her slumbers; make her smile
/, si to greet .s 55, 44
NJ Unconscionsness.
Sweet morning: wake her with thy joys
GUS sounds, W s5S { st - NJ 34 49, & I'M
FIN her with giadness that her life
- abounds ils2 4
istN With power to bless! ..3s
.:3 TIT. HigEason.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1905-03-31
The Local Wac.

Pointing to the distant peak, we ask
of the native it's name.
THAT there mountain" he says.
That's Catfish mountain"
IAN odd name" we comment. "And
why is the mountain so called?"
Because nobody can scale it." he
replied.
Hurriedly Selling a sack Of crack
ers and a box of sardines. we walk
from the corner store in high dud-
geon.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1905-03-31
Ideal.

I'VE can't have everything in this
life" said the philosopher.
NO." answered Mr.. Dustin Stax
"The ideal but impossible combination
is a millionaire menu with a deck.
hand appetite"
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1905-03-31
The Old Quarrel.

The Doctor-But surely it is an hon
orable ambition to want to live in his
tory!
The professor-Not at all. That
would be an absurd and ridiculous am
bition. We shall have to be satisfied.
my dear friend. with being embalmed
in history. St s.S. II 3
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1905-03-31
DR.. J. H.slatNpLAu6 (spselalist),
Eye, Ear. Nose and Throat.
Fargo, ~. o.: &. $s.s u.

a woman Can l. love and hate. within,
: few hours with ease and success. \.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1905-03-31

1t X ycu want to please woman Say
oDthing and listen. Y Isl. &
Reporter and farmer. [volume] (Webster, Day County, Dakota [S.D.]) 188?-1946, 1905-03-16
DENVER Transfer USES RIFLE
ON SUPPOSED ENEMIES AND
ON POLICE OFFICERS.
Albert Smith.
Clerk

Denver, March 13.-Three persons
dead, one missing, four others in a
critical condition and one house In
ashes sums up briefly the result of a
fierce combat during the day in which
George Schistler, q teamster. played
the leading part. Maddened because
of his defeat In law suit, which Kent
FIJI. the man whom he pronounced his
bitterest enemy, had been victorious
and swearing vengeance against him
and his family. Schistler armed him
self with q rife and started out to do
murder. As . result Mr.. and Mrs.
Eli and George Schistler are dead. q
child Of the Fills IL missing (believed
70 have been burned to DEATH. DIR.
Frank Dulin, police surgeon, Captain
william johanna. acting chief Of po-
lice. and Mike Kelly, policeman. are
seriously wounded: and the wife of
0chistler IL prostrated over the affair
and may die from the shock.
Reporter and farmer. [volume] (Webster, Day County, Dakota [S.D.]) 188?-1946, 1905-03-16
TERRORIST is KILLED
ACCIDENTAL BOMB EXPLOSION
IN A HOTEL AT ST. Pc
TERSRURG.

st. Petersburg, March 1.-THE eX
plosion OF bomb at the Hotel Bristol
here just before daylight blew TO atoms
the owner of the bomb. man with an
English passport and giving the name
of Alfred Henry Mccullough, ana
wrecked the adjoining rooms. killing
the wife of an officer and inJuring
several other dodgers. The explosion
was heard blocks away and created a
tremendous sensation. There is not
the slightest doubt that the man killed
was connected with terrorist plots
The bomb was of the same power as
those which killed the late Minister Oh
the Interior Won Plehve and Grand
Duke Sergius, creating the same havoc
as did the explosion at the Hotel Du
Nord last spring. The preliminary in
vestigation ~ the police leads them
TO believe that Mccullough was en-
gagged either in packing his effects, as
the Hotel Bristol was to be vacated,
or in preparing for some desperate
enterprise when the bomb fell and ex-
ploded The police Immediately sur
rounded the hotel with mounted gen
darmes, allowing no one to within
fifty PAGES.
Reporter and farmer. [volume] (Webster, Day County, Dakota [S.D.]) 188?-1946, 1905-03-16
Notice of Application for Probate
of Will.

(niar l64w)
State of South Dakota, 80
County of Day,
In county court.
Notice of time appointed for proving
will, etc.
In the matter of the estate of Mary
Tomaszewski, deceased,
The State of South Dakota sends greet
ing to Martin Rebelski, konstansia Dol
ney, Michelina Friski. Ragilia Henki, and
II. Tomaszewski heirs next of kin of Mary
Tomaszewski, deceased.
Pursuant to an order of said court, made
on the 14tn day of March, A. ID. 1905
notice is hereby given that Saturday the
Sth day of April, A. ID. 1905. at one
o'clock p. m, of said day at the court room
of said court at Webster i'm the County OF
Day, South Dakota. have been appointed
as the time and place for proving the will
of said Mary Tomaszewski deceased and
for hearing the application of Martin
Rebelski for the issuance of letters tesla
mentary to Albert Dolne y,when and where
any person interested may appear and
contest the same.
Witness the Hon. John III. Lund, Judge
of the county court, and the
seal of said court. this 10Th
day of March, a. ID. 1905, at
his office in the City of Web
ster, County of Day, State of
South Dakota.
Seal
Albert Smith.
Clerk.
Reporter and farmer. [volume] (Webster, Day County, Dakota [S.D.]) 188?-1946, 1905-03-16
From Waubay Clipper.

hio1h w hhDdC SIIpDSIs
l.. l.. Holm was at Webster Tuesday.
Miss Margaret Stephenson went TO
Webster Saturday evening to visit with
relatives for a week
Hon. P. f. Zafft returned from Pierre
Saturday night, the legislature having
adjourned Friday at midnight
Bro. w. 2. Mack, of the Webster
World, and j. j. Adams of the Reporter
and Farmer force were visitors here
Sunday.
Major Maynard returned Friday
morning from his studies in Mime
apolis and will spend the spring vaca-
ton at horne.
M. Rexford had his desk and office
furniture hauled to Webster Monday
and began his duties as county auditor
Tuesday.
ID. w. Hussong returned from Pierre
Saturday night after having served his
term of sixty days as watchman of the
senate.
Albert Barse suffered a stroke of
paralysis Monday and his left side is
paralysed He is still unconscious at
this writing, and there is little chance
for recovery.
A big bouncing baby boy arrived
Thursday night, March 2, at the home
of Mr. and Mrs. Mike Helvig of Gren-
VILE.
b. +. Harrington and Miss Dena Arndt
were united in marriage Tuesday even
ing by Rev. j. S. Hardness of Webster.
The ceremony was performed at the
home of Mr.. and Mrs. d. p. Herington,
and only the immediate relatives were
present. The newly welded compile
departed that evening for visit among
the brides relatives in Wisconsin. This
marriage WAS in the nature of a sur
prise to many of their friends, but the
secret was out before train time and
they were given a royal send-off at the
depot. 1t is presumed that b. f. Dor
rowed file from the brakeman to
sever the paddock and chain with which
their grips were fastened together and
locked
Reporter and farmer. [volume] (Webster, Day County, Dakota [S.D.]) 188?-1946, 1905-03-16

There will be a public temperance
meeting in the court room at Webster
Sunday, April 2, at s o'clock p. M. for
the purpose of discussing the license
question from an impartial stand point,
presenting the question in all its phases.
Light will be thrown upon this subject
from Biblical, chronological, moral and
business standpoint. Every voter
should be present, business men are
Especially invited.