davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1905-10-28
Dr.. oordon's "soft SNAP

DR.. George A. Gordon, pastor Of the
Old South Church, tells this on him.
self: Dr.. Gordon, who was In early
manhood an ironworker Of some sort.
met one Of his former comrades of
the forge shortly after coming to the
Old South, and his salutation was:
Good morning, Mike!"
How are ye, George?" was Mikes
reply.
How are you getting on, Mike?"
asked the minister.
only fair. George. All the hard
work l want; but what are you driv-
ing at, George?"
"Oh, I'm pastor Of the church you
see over yonder."
What, you preacher In that swell
church with the steeple out Of plumb"
Yes. Mike, I'm the pastor" replied
DR.. Gordon, an amused smile on his
face.
by Cd. George. but you've struck
a soft snap!"-Boston Herald.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1905-10-28

Look here, Halton, why In creation
did you lure me into buying a ticket
for the lawn fete"
why, did you pay out much!
Much? Why. they charged me 80
cents for q lemonade and dollar for
ice cream!"
THAT was exorbitant."
Then I was lured through the
Maze of Mystery Witches Caldron.
ETC., and by the time they finished tell
ing my fortune didn't have a penny.
THAT was tough"
"Oh. l could have recovered from
that, but it was the sequel. When
reached home dead broke my wife
accused me Of playing poker and hasn't
spoken to me since."-Chicaso News.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1905-10-28
AROSE IN HIS WRATH.
Report Interrupted With Question Of
Personal Privilege.

NepotS SnSerfupteo win Question Of
Personal Privilege.
Jay Phipps was entertaining at
Beaufort castle, Lord Lovat's Scot
fish estate. a party of Pittsburgers.
In the smoking room, one evening,
the talk turned to the humor of the
Scotch. and Mr.. Phipps suddenly
laughed.
"The Scotch" he said. have a con-
scious and an unconscious humor.
Both are good, but l prefer the latter.
l heard good example of 1t, the other
night.
In hall near here I attended q
meeting. The orator of the occasion
was an eloquent and distinguished
mana member, in fact, of the House
of Lords and below him, as he
spouted forth his eloquence. sat a
bald-headed reporter, taking down
eagerly every word.
1.-THE hall was an ancient one, and,
as the evening passed. it grew hot and
damp. Moisture. gathering on the
gray stones and pillars. fell in big,
cool drops on the assemblage
We'll, as the orator spouted a fiery
stream of rhetoric. the bald reporter,
writing away furiously. received on
his bare and gllstening skull huge
drop Of moisture.
He interrupted the speaker at once.
He leaped to his feet.
What's that sputterin'?' he cried
sternly."
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1905-10-28

An owl sat in jack-oak tree
And blinked his big. round eyes at me:
At Rose and me beside the brook,
In calm, sequestered. moonlit nook.
Then screeched the owl with bold
halloo.
And brashly querieA. "whoo? WHO'D?
Whoo?"
"It's only Rose and l." said.
And you would better go to bed,
Instead of rudely staring thus
With your big eyes a-down at u.s."
But Mr.. Owl, with much ado.
He petulantly hooted "Whoo!"
"1t's Rose" said; "just Rose and 1;
Beside US two there's no one nigh.
We're sitting here upon the brink
And what is more. do not think
It's extra nice to thus pursue
Your impolite. persistent 'Whoo?"
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1905-10-28
A Pin Tip to Women.

It took a dozen pins to fasten the
rune at the bottom Of the skirt.
at looks all right now" said the
owner Of the torn gown ruefully. but
the pins will all fall out before I have
walked a block
They wouldn't II you had put them
in right" said the woman who knows
things. I'm pinning on a fIource or
mendins = round-and-round rent Of any
kind. never put the pins in length
wise. They will be sure to work out
II you do. Just stick them in head mp
and they will stay in place through
miles Of pedestrianiam."
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1905-10-28
THE CRICKET.

TO Natures patient. listening ear
Arose the plants from morn to night
Without pause from morn to night
His endless grumbling ran.
The sun was hot. the rain was wet,
And neither rightly sent:
Besides, each fellow thought himself
For higher circles meant.
Then grew his ceaseless discomfort
And swelled in volume strong:
Quoth Nature: II will make life
Whose protest IL a song"
Twas thus the cricket came to be,
With all Its winsome tricks.
6ole creature on the earth which makes
Sweet music when 1t kicks.
-McLandburEh Wilson.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1905-10-28
Sharks Eaps.

Sharks lay their eggs at the bottom
of the sea among the coral groves.
These eggs have At each end long
tendrils, which have the power Of mo-
ton seen in the tendrils Of terrestrial
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1905-10-28

The big owl blinked his eyes at me
From out the foliage Of the tree;
WHO'D. WHO'D? Whoo whoo?" he weird.
ly shrieked,
And then at Rose and me he peeked.
cts only we." I cried; I'VE two!"
But all he answered was WHO'D?
Whoo?"
"Just Rose and I-er-course you
know
There's Cupid with his silver bow!
But it's not thee he seeks to MAIN
The elf is out for bigger camel"
And then that owl went straight to
bed,
Shut tight his eyes, tucked in his
head!
He must have felt secure apart
With Cupid aiming at my heart!
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19
NO PEACE SOUGHT.
Neither Russia Nor Japan Asking


Neither Russia Nor Japan Asking
Fer II.
WASHINGTON-Ja has made
no overtures for peace to Russia. di-
rectly or indirectly through the
United States, or any other power,
and contemplates no such action, and
now that Port Arthur has fallen, pro-
poses to press the war in the north
all the more vigorously by reinforcing
the japanese armies at Lao Yang
with the greater part of the troops
which have been besieging Port Ar
thur. This, in brief, represents the
views of Kogoro Takahira, the Jap
anese minister, who has recently re-
sumed charge of the legation at Wash
ington after a long illness at New
York.
THE fall of Port Arthur" said the
minister, lis but a step in the war
which Japan is waging for princi-
pie. Certainly it Is an important step,
but nothing could be further from the
truth than the assumption that, be-
cause Japan has captured a strong.
hold, the fall of which had long been
expected, the Japanese government
Will now make overtures for peace.
Japan is too busy fighting. We are as
much in earnest today as we were at
the outset of the war. We have made
no overtures for peace, either directly
or indirectly, nor have the powers APP
preached us with any idea of inter
vention"
At the Russian embassy it was re-
iterated that Russia would fight all
the harder in view of the temporary
loss of Port Arthur.
Europe, it is learned, is firmly OF
the conviction that, however dark tho
outlook for peace at this moment
when the prospect brightens it is to
President Roosevelt that the neutrals
as well as the belligerents will look
for the intermediary through which ne
gotiations can be made. AS a Euro
pean ambassador said today. the
American government is practically
the only government to which both
belligerents will be willing to look for
assistance in reaching a settlement,
when the time comes, and aside from
this fact the high personal regard in
which the president is held, bota at
st. Petersburg and Toxic, makes it all
the more probable that through him,
when Russia and Japan have fought
their fight, the powers must hope for
peace.
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19
LAND FRAUDS IN MONTANA.
Purchases Made by Senator Clark
Unlawfully Entered.

Unlawfully Entered.
HELENA, Mont.--Judge William S
Hunt, in the United States court here
overruled the demurrers Of the de-
PENDANTS to the indictments in the
case Of the United States versus r.
M. Cobban, ]. B. Cattlin and many
others, charged with subornation of
perjury and perjury in connection
with timber land entries in western
Montana, and the accused will now
have to come to trial.
There are twelve indictments for
subordination of perjury and ninety
for perjury. Included in the defend
ants are many settlers in Powell and
Missoula counties, who are alleged to
have made false oath in proving upon
their timber lands which were after
wards acquired by Senator W. A.
Clark 1t is charged that Cobban and
Cattlin, well known citizens of Mis-
soula, induced their people to swear
falsely. The indictments were return
ed in June, 1901, and the cases have
since been pending in court.
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19

frightened by the approach OF any au.
tomobile or vehicle, or when It shall
appear that any horse or horses, mule
or mules, driven by any person or
persons upon any of said streets, roads
or highways are about TO become
frightened or are frightened by the ap.
proach Of any such automobile or We.
hicle it shall be the duty of the per-
son driving or conducting such auto
mobile or vehicle to cause the same
to come TO a full stop, unless horse
or horses, mule or mules, have pass.
ed" Mrs. w. II. Sutton was selected
to furnish a journal of the proceed
ings at $3.50 a day, she to furnish all
material except machines. The APP
pointment of W. II. Askwith as com
mander of the Grand Island Soldiers
Homo was confirmed by the senate in
executive session by unanimous vote.
Bills We're introduced: S. +. 80, by
Gitlin of Dawson, an act providing for
the election Of a prosecuting attor
ney for each judicial district in the
state, to hold Office for a term of four
years, the first election to be held in
1906; the prosecuting attorney shall
be paid $4,000 year; in districts
containing counties with a population
of more than 100000 he shall have
two deputies, each to he paid $1,000
a year. An act to establish local option
by counties; providing that 10 per
cent of the voters can file petition
with the county clerk thirty days be-
fore a general election AND get the
question voted on. Providing that
when an irrigation district is formed
everyone owning land in the district
is entitled to a vote. S. F.. 80, by Shell
don of Cass-Providing that when the
Missouri river changes it's course
and puts part of Nebraska in an
other state, the accretion and the in.
habitants thereof shall become part
of the other state, the same to be an
nounced by proclamation of the gov
crnor.
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19
BUILDINGS FOR NEBRASKA.
York and Grand Island Likely to Be
Thus Favored,

Thus Favored.
WASHINGTON-lt is almost GER
tain that York and Grand Island will
get public buildings at the hands Of
this congress. Sites may be provided
in North Platte, Columbus and Kear-
ney, but the present session will not
provide for buildings in the last
named towns. Congressman Hinshaw
has been interchangeable in his Iabors
to secure for York one hundred thou
sand dollars for building. but the
chances are he will get but seventy
five thousand. However, that amount
may be increased at a later session.
No definite assurance has as yet been
given by the committee that York win
be included in the list, but Congress-
man Norris, who is a member of the
committee, is making a hard fight for
both Grand Island and York. Members
of the committee intimate that mas
much as Grand Island has the largest
population and that congress is likely
to pass law providing for the hold
ing Of sessions of the federal court in
Grand Island, the government building
there should be large one. Hence the
committee is likely to appropriate
$125,0O0 for Grand Island.
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19
Value of Fox Skins

The only skin which approaches the
sea otter in value is that of the blacl,
or silver fox. II is said that good
skins OF the black fox have Deem sold
in st. Petersburg at from $1,000 to
$4,000, A pair of silver skins in Lon.
don sold for $4,000, while a single
skin is said to have brought $1,000
Fish and Stream.
He who does not give does not live.
Berlin Land Values Double.
The ground value of the city of
Berlin is said to be worth twice what
II was In 1887.
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19
BRAZIL Wants an Ambass.dor \

WASHINGTON Brazil through
her charge d'affaires at Washington
has transmitted to this government
the intimation that she desires to be
represented at Washington by an
ambassador and would welcome the
appointment of an American ambassa-
dor at Rio de Janeiro. Cordial as are
the relations between the two govern.
ments, the need of an American am.
bassador to Brazil is not felt by this
government and it is quite improb-
able that the suggestion will be en-.
couraged.
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19

housekeeping to the action of
the house. demanding information
from Congressman Burkett as to
whether he would support President
Roosevelt in his railroad reform legis-
lation, the clerk on the 18th, read
the following: Am advised of action
of Nebraska house Of representatives
today, asking my views. Please say
to the house for me that / stand
squarely with the president and in.
dorse his message for proper control
of railroad rates" The telegram was
received by Speaker Rouse. The house
adjourned at $3.50 p. m. out of re-
spect to the late Governor CARRIER.
whose death was announced in a tele-
gram received by Governor Mickey
from Joseph CARRIER OF Red Cloud.
When the telegram was read Haley
OF Webster moved for the appoint
ment of committee to draw suitable
resolutions. The following were pass
ed: Whereas, BY the death of Hon.
Silas CARRIER the state has suffered the
loss of distinguished and honored
citizen, who has served many times
in public office and by reason of his
exemplary life and honorable service
has endeared himself to the people OF
our commonwealth; therefore be it
Resolved, That we honor the memory
of the Hon. Slas CARRIER by adjourn
ing for the remainder of the day. and
that these resolutions be spread upon
tn journal of the house and that a
copy of the same be forwarded to his
immediate family, to whom we offer
our sincere sympathy in this their
hour of grief" McAllister of Deuel.,
introduced his reapportionment bill.
1t is house roll No. 81, and with one
slight change is identical with house
roll No. 81, which he introduced two
years ago and which failed of pas
sage. The only point of difference be-
tween the two measures is that the
present bill adds one more county,
Banner, to district No. co. represent
ed by McAllister which now includes
Deuel., Keith, Cheyenne and Kimball
The new bill reapportions the senator
ial as well as the representative dis
tricts. 1t takes Douglas county out of
the Tenth representative district and
places it in the Ninth, giving it four
more representatives, and instead of
leaving Douglas in the Sixth senator
ial district, as at present. with three
senators. the new bill creates the
Fifth district of Douglas alone with
four senator's and the Sixth. with
Douglas and Saunders, with one SEN
ator. SO under the new bill Douglas
county has seventeen and a half mem
berS in senate and house together,
whereas at present it has twelve.
Among bills introduced the following
occur: To provide for the erection and
maintenance of a hard fiber binding
Irvine plant at the Nebraska state
penitentiary and to make appropria-
tons therefor. Appropriates $45 900
for establishment and $150,000 for op-
Grafton. II. II. No. 81 by Warner of
l4ancaster--An act to provide for the
reassessment of all real property in
1905; permits county assessors in
counties or over 10000 to make up
assessment books; permits annual re-
vision of real estate valuation; gives
state board power to increase or de-
crease assessment on any class of
property; provides for county levy
after state board has made its equali-
cation, as recommended by the gov
ernor in his message.
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19
Energy of Radium,

The quantity of energy put forth by
radium is very large. Expressed as
heat, it is sufficient to raise its weight
of water to boiling point in an hour
Expressed as power, the energy of a
saltspoonful would lift 500 tons a
mile high-power 10000 to 1000. 600
times as great as that developed by
the most powerful chemical energy
hitherto known.
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19
Oldest Inhabited Residence.

The oldest inhabited residence in
the British kingdom is said to be
Dunvegan castle, in the Isle OF Skye
the seat of the McI-eods Of Mcleod
part OF which dates from the ninth
century, or couple of hundred years
before the conquest OF England by
William the Norman.
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19
Nearly Drowned by Kangaroo.

While chasing a full-grown male
kangaroo ct Reedy Creek. Victoria, a
local resident was suddenly seized by
the animal and ducked repeatedly in
the water, being only saved from
death by the courage OF his dog, who
finally put the kangaroo to fight.
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19
Modernizinu Rome,

Several large new hotels are being
built in Rome. The natives complain
that the city is being modernized and
Anglicized. Several bars, with bar
maids, have recently been opened,
and the Cafe de Roma now has grill
room,
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19
Nebraska Manufacturers Census.

WASHINGTON-Work will soon be
commenced by the government to
take another census of the manufac-
lures throughout the United States
for 1904. Three special agents will be
designated to take the Nebraska cen
sus. Two will be appointed at Omaha
and one at Lincola. These agents will
be selected upon the recommenda-
ton of congressman from the state
The compensation will be SO per dav
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19
BIG Animals plsapp airing.

The Indian rhinoceros is nearly eX.
tinct, There are two specimens in
the London geological gardens and
two on the European continent. Very
few are left in wild state in India
and Assam. and unless special meas
ures be taken for their preservation
they will soon disappear,
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19

SENATE-The second section of S.
F. 20, introduced by Senator Schreck
on the 18th, for regulation of automo-
biles, reads as follows: Whenever il
shall appear that any horse or mule
driven or ridden by any person upon
any OF said streets, roads or highways
is about to become frightened or is
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19

There are two things we have never
been able to understand; How a
hotel has the nerve to ask forty cents
for baked potato and where a flor.
list gets the courage to take a collar
for a chrysanthemum.
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19
Injuries to Drunkards.

In the casualty wards of the Lon
don General hospital regularly, on
Saturday nights, 80 per cent OF the in.
juries admitted are directly due to
drink, and on the last boxing day
every admission was due to drink.
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19
LEGISLATURE
of NEBR ASKA
A Synopsis Of Proceedings Of the Twenty Ninth Gem
eral Session

into laws. He urged the senators to
whatever sections of the statutes were
to be repealed and not to wind up
the bill by saying that all sections in
conflict with the bill be repealed. Be.
cause of this slipshod way of prepar.
ing bills he said the section permit
ting state officers to give guaranty
bonds had been repealed and much
confusion had resulted. A message
was received from the governor an
nouncing the appointment of William
S. Askwith TO the position of com,
mandant of the Soldiers and Sailors
home at Grand Island for the period
of two years from December 1, 1903,
and requesting his confirmation by the
senate. The following bills were intro.
duced and read for the first time: An
act to prevent the illegal expenditures
Of public funds by making officials re.
sponsible for money spent out of any
funds in excess of the amount contain
ed in such funds. To punish jurors
and referees for receiving brides by
a penitentiary sentence of one to five
years. To prevent officers from spend
ing public funds in excess of statu-
tory limitation. To define conditions
of child dependency, neglect, cruelty
and i'll treatment and to prescribe
methods for the protection, DISPOSE.
ton and supervision of dependent
neglected, cruelty or ill-treated chill.
dren and to provide punishment for
the violation of this act. To define
bribery of jurors and referees and to
fix punishment for the conviction of
the same. An act providing for the
examination of dipsomaniacs, inc
briates and persons addicted to the
excessive use of morphine, cocaine or
other narcotic drugs, for the deten-
ton, care and treatment of such per-
sons in the Lincoln insane hospital,
and for their parole.
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19

1t is generally easy enough to judge
n man by the diamond he wears in
his shirt front
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19

The house, by resolution, on the
18th, invited Congressman Burkett to
return from Washington and say per-
sonally whether or not he will support
President Roosevelt's anti-railroad
policy. The resolution was introduced
by Mr.. Meradith of York. Speaker
Rourse announced his committees, ac-
companying the same with a letter in
which some explanation is made. A
motion by Wilson that the printing
committee be authorized to ascertain
the cost of Monograph copies of the
daily minutes for the members was
passed. At the first of the session a
motion was passed doing away with
this custom on the grounds that IS a
day, the cost last session, was too
much. The committee on rules return
ed report which was adopted and
heretofore. Among resolutions intro
duced was one condemning Postmas.
ter Sizer Of Lincoln for his activity in
the speakership contest and recon-
mending that the postal department
at Washington investigate his case.
These bills. among others, were in
troduced ReapportiOnment bill.
divides the tsate into siXty-seven rep
resentatives districts and thirty-seven
in the senate. District No 5 includes
Douglas county to have four sena-
tors. District No. 6 shall include
Douglas and Saunders and have one
float senator Representative district
No. 9 shall include Douglas county
and have thirteen representatives. To
compel railroads to run passenger
and freight train on schedul time; an
act to do away with the tonnage sys-
TEN. An act making it obligatory on
county attorneys to file complaints
when N possession of evidence which
warrants prosecution. At present the
| county attorney may enter a nolle at
his discretion. To punish jurors and
| referees who take brides, and defin-
ing the crime of jury tampering.
Dividing Omaha iremen into two
shifts, each to work twelve hours a
day. Defining child dependency and
providing punishment for the i'll treat
ment of children. House Roll No. 40
provides that the county clerks shall
do the duty of county assessors in
counties under 10000 population.
House Roll No, Al, provides penalty
that, in the discretion of the Judge,
one who is accused of attempting to
poison a person shall be imprisoned
or fined, House Roll No. AZ imposes
restrictions on traction engines on
the highway, and provides they must
be stopped within 100 yards OF teams
or stock. House Roll No. 43 amends
the criminal code, allowing prescott.
ing attorney six challenges for each
defendant
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19
Trades in London.

According to the late returns there
are 1856 distinct trades being carried
on In London and its suburbs.
Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921, 1905-01-19

In the senate on the 18th, I.ieuten-
ant Governor McGilton delivered a
short address on the matter of pre-.
pairing bills that are to be enacted