The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1905-05-27
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married for loveY "a good deal ~
Judge. =" '""'
notice you never wear a watch
Win your evening clothes" NO.
never have both out at the same
ume."-Cornell Widow.
Johnny's Friend-I hear Johnny e.
learning to play the French horn
Johnny's Roommate-Yes. I've had
WIND OF it.-Harvard Lampoon
You haven't much of a head sail
tne needle to the pin. NO. replied
the latter, but at the same time we
pins have our fine points. "-Cleyeland
Plain Dealer
Nell-Of course she's not pretty I'm,
its remarkable how her face lights nm
when she talks. Belle-Oh, that's NOT
no remarkable. She's got a lantern
jaw.-Philadelphia Ledger.
First Society Woman-That's nv
baby that we just passed. Second So.
ciety Woman-How could Won tell,
First Society Woman-I recognized
the nurse.-Brooklyn Eagle.
Teacher-How many command.
ments are there Tommy-Not any
Teacher-Why, Tommy There are
ten. Tommy-Aw, dem was all broke
long ago.-Cleveland Leader.
"smoothleigh is certainly the pollt.
est man know. what makes Won so
positive" Hes pretending he's cured
OF his dyspepsia SC as not to hurt his
doctors feelings. "-Town Topics.
well, Doctors Brown and Smith are
going to operate upon old Gotrox." us
the operation necessary" "Why, yes:
Brown has note coming due, and
Smith wants an automobile. Puck.
"Haroldp' began his wife in a furi.
GUS temper, my mind is made up"
Mercy" interrupted her husband; is
that so2 l had hoped that your mind,
at least, was your ownw-Detroit Free
Press.
Friend-You must enjoy your new
position. So much honor, dignity and
prestigel University President-Yes;
but won't get so much money as the
head coach Of the football team
Somerville Journal.
Can you support my daughter in
the style to which she has been accus-
tomedT Perhaps not. But 1 can
support her in the style to which her
mother was accustomed during her
early married life. Life.
Jaspar-I think l have reason tc
believe that last poem of mine is a
classic. Jumpuppe-Why so? Jasper
i find that all my friends have either
seen 1t or heard of 1t, but none Of
them has read it.-Exchange.
The Preacher was surprised tc
see your husband get up and walk out
OF church while was preaching. The
Wife-Oh, don't think anything of
thatl You know he's troubled with
somnambulism!-Yonkers Statesman
81 see, Josiah, that somebody has
found out that college life decreases
the desire of girls to marry" IN bet
the trouble is, Nancy, that 1t decreases
the desire Of the young fellows to
marry 'em."-Cleveland Plain Dealer
Are you going to entertain this
winterY "Well," answered Mr.. Cum.
rox, mother and the girls will have a
lot OF people at the house, as usual.
But l never can tell whether they are
being entertained or bored."-Er
change.
Modern Mother-Why, child alive
what are you taking off that dolly's
clothes for? Modern Child-I'm going
to Famine her to see II she's beer
vaccinated. l can't have 'er spreadin
ia gion among my other dollies.-Bal
timore American.
Judge-You are charged with beat
ing your wife every morning before
breakfast What have you to say FOL
Yourself? Prisoner-Well, you see
Judge. that's my best time, as l have
TO run for a car as soon as breakfas
IL oyer."-Exchange.
"I half believe that there's a skele
ton I'm the Kissmore's closet.
sbouldn't wonder. One day whei
Kissmore took me home with him un
expectedly to dinner, thought hear'
II throwing things at him out IN I'M
kitchen. "-Exchange.
souire's Daughter Ito gardener
wife. who suffers from chronic rneu
mat,sm)-Have you ever tried sweu
,sh massage, Mrs. Brown? Mrs. Browi
have heard say 1t be very gooI
FOR the rheumatics, miss; but we don
,v, Il In these parts.-Punch.
cu.tomer-How is 1t that the pric'
=, neck of potatoes remains twent,
oo,+s On far in the season? I'd thlni
.ha mice would become larger as IN.
s.a.on advanced. Grocer-n wouiu
madam. only it's so much easier c
change the size of the pecks.-baiu
more American.
E,amining Physician flor Insurance
company)-I'm afraid we can 'nA
ror air You are too great risA
Applicant resiguedly)-Wel' pernap
am The fact is, that when l &c
-,.h never send for a doctor. JUS
Low around until l get well. Examlh
ing Physician-Eh1 UNEVEN taA
, vou.-New York Weekly.
Mrs. Hawkins-And ave you mau
al the arrangements for your MAJ
rage, my dearl Mrs. Jorkins-"el
not quite all. I've got to puy Il, IL
trooso. and take a 'ouse. and get III
husband a job, aud buy i'm goo
suit o, clothes, and get some reg IA
'ui. -, --oru m do. An then I'm I