The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1905-10-07
So
- sF 5-gtAs
ll9slHEEgS&S&Ss~ w
''''''e' ~

+.
can't afford it.-Cincinnati TrihnDa
a Compromise: Miranda--No. Fred
! wont take the armchair; You take If
= red-7' Er--suppose we both take ~.
Life. - Ns''Ns ~ '7Z777l
), Young DR.. Swift calls every day on |,
the little widow" "Dear me! Ia shs
as Ill as all thatT' mo, but she ia
~ pretty as all that."-Ex. a.sssa...
Foodle-My dear girl, 1 have q little
more sense than you give me credit for,
ars' Foodle-I am glad of that-for
your sake!--Illustrated Bits.
DE only thing dat some people gifts
out OF education" said Uncle Eben. 'Is
&c ability to talk SOS people can't un.
derstand ashington Star.
Blnks-Skinnem tells me he is going
into Catchem's law office as a partner.
J1nks-Doesn't he mean as an accom-.
plice? - Cinnati Commercial-Tribune.
Shells skin grating q very late dis
coVeryE He-No, it is only a new
branch OF very old art; all grating
Is Skin proeess.-Detroit Free Press.
Knicker-So the Newriches are get
ung culture? Bocker-Yes, they have
learned to speak of q house beautiful
instead Of beautiful house.-New
York Sun.
Broker-No more margin to put up?
Why, when the account was opened
you told me you were we'll off. Lamb
ley-So was, but didn't know it.
Town Topics.
she-Did you ever take your automo-
bile apart to see how it worked2 He
We'll, not exactly. I have taken it
apart to see how it didn't work.-Yon-
kers Statesman.
Mayme-What a gossip Mrs. Gadby
is! Edith-Yes, indeed. never tell
her anything without finding out that
she has already told it herself.-Phn-
, adelphia Bulletin.
Mr.. Jones-My daughter is only 10.
You had better wait until she is older.
The Lover-Well. I've waited two
years for her to get older, but she still
} stays at 19.-Judge.
After the Wake: Mrs Cassidy
Twas very natural he looked. Mrs.
Casey-Aye! shure he looked fur all
. the wurld loike lowe man layIn' there
. dead.-Illustrated Bits.
Giles-So you've got 4 place in that
banking house? l suppose it was be,
cause you knew the president? Har
ris-Partly that, and partly because
> he didn't know me.-Boston Tran
4 script.
Aunt Hannah-Have you told any
one Of your engagement to Mr.. Sweet
err? Edith-No; l haven't told a sou
except Bessie Miller, who thought h'
was going to ask her.-Boston Tran
script.
Johnny Geehaw-Paw, what's thu
il law Of gravitation? Farmer Geehav
i dunno. hain't got time to keel
up with all the fool statoots the DUR
d Legislature passes.-Louisville Courier
y Journal.
3 Iighwayman-How much none,
n have you got? Heldup-I couldn'
guess. Highwayman-You can't CUES
!. the amount? Heldup-No. Highway
man-Then give it up.-CleVelan
Plain Dealer.
Neighbors-I heard your dog howlin
last night. If he bowls three night
10 in succession it's a sure sign of dealt
Nextdoor-Indeed! And who do 20
n think will die? Neighbors-The dos
Chicago News.
:. Seedy Stranger-Excuse me, sir, br
can you change dollar for me! HI
= manitarian-Why, yes. Seedy Strange
Thanks. And now will kindly tie
me where l can get the dollar?-CleV
land Plain Dealer.
j "rhat Mrs. Snaggs Is too much of
aristycrat fur me to mingie Wld
"a BLOWS that?" "She was knocked dow
A bv push cart and she had it put In
81 de paper dat she was hit by an auto
= mobile. "-Detroit Free Press.
H. Tommy-Smokin cigarettes is def
of sure to hurt yer. Jimmy-G'on! Whe
IS, did yer git dat notion? "From pop
ny Jaw! he wuz jist stringin' yer" IN
ca he wasn't stringin' me; he wuz stra
-, min me. OATS how I knows 1t hurts
or Catholic Standard and Times.
lot GLOW do you account for the fac1
ne asked the doctor, "as shown by actu
"A investigation, that thirty-two out OF
~ ery hundred criminals in the count
a are left-handedY' "That's easily
ed counted for" said the professor; It
:ly other sixty-eight are right handed"
IS, London Tit-Bits.
~ "say," said the girls dear lit
n. brother, "are you a baseball player
mo" replied young Mr.. Slowt'
or "what made you ask that?" e
%, nothing, only when ma was askin'
no no the other day, whether you was e'
ne. coin to come to bat, she said it looB
d. +o her as though you was playin'
ta- your release" Eek.
nd Mrs, Tittle-Wasn't it disgrace
!; Is the way these women talked dur
mic the play last night! MIS- lattl
Sarah