Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1905-05-06
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''''' &'Nu A"t loNt' a SoOu uedI Ike
cat that is owned by a vegetarian.
Judge.
/ notice YOU never wear a watch
with your evening clothes" mo; I
never have both out at the same
time, cornell Widow.
Johnny's Friend-I hear johnny is
learning 10 play the French horn.
Johnuy'S Roommate-Yes. I've had
wind Of it-Harvard Lampoon.
You haven't much of a head" sail
the needle TO the pin. No, replied
the latter but Mt the same time we
pins nave our fine points. "-Clevelan
Plain Dealer.
N@ll--of course she's not pretty. but
it's remarkable how her face lights ND
when she talks. Belle-Oh. that's not
so remarkable. She's got a lantern
jaw-Phtladelphia Ledger.
First Society Woman-That's my
baby that we Just passed Second So
clety Woman--llow could you tens
First Society Woman-~I recognized
the Brooklyn Eagle.
Teacher--How many command
ments are there Tommy-Not any.
Why, Tommy! There are
ten, Tommy Gem was all broke
long Cleveland Leader.
"Smoothleigh is certainly the pollt-
est man l know. what makes you SO
positive" Hes pretending he's cured
or his dyspepsia So as not to hurt his
doctors feelings. Town Topics.
well, Doctors Brown aud smith are
going to operate upon old Gotrox." "IS
the operation necessarily "Why, yes;
Brown has a note coming due, ana
Smith wants an automobile."-P
"lIarold"' began his wife in a furi-
Gus temper. my mind is made up-----'
Mercy" interrupted her husband, us
that so? had hoped that your mind,
AT least, was you ownr'--D Detroit Free
Press.
Triend-You must enjoy your new
position So much honor. dignity ana
prestige, University Prcsdent--Yes;
but won't get 50 much money as the
head coach of the football team.
Somerville Journal
can YOU support my daughter IN
The style to which she has been accus-
| tomedY" Perhaps not But can
support her in the style to which nor
mother was accustomed during her
early married liie."--Iife.
Il
| Jaspar-I think have reason 70
believe that last poem OF mine Is
classic. Jumpuppe Why SO? Jasper
II find that all my friends have either
seen it or heard Of IT, but none OF
them has read it Exchange.
The Preacher was surprised &c
/ see your husband get up and walk out
OF church while was preaching The
| Wifc--Oh. don't think anything OF
| that. You know he's troubled with
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES Statesman.
II see, Josiah that somebody has
found out that college life decreases
the desire OF girls TO marry" I'm bet
the trouble is. Nancy. that II decreases
the desire of the young fellows 10
marry 'em. Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Are you going to entertain this
wintcrY "Wcll. answered Mr. Cum
rox. mother ana the girls will have
| lot Of people ut the house. rs usual.
/ But never can tell whether they arc
being entertained or bored. FIX.
change.
Modern Mother why, child alive,
what are you taking off that doly's
clothes for? Modern Child-I'm going
/ to famine her to see If she's been
,accinatcd can't have or spreadin'
'taeion among my other doIlics,-- Bal
/ tluorc American.
/ Judgc-You are charged with boat
| ing your wife every morning before
! breakfast What have you to say for
| Yourself? Prisoner Well you see,
Judge that's my best time, as ! have
/ t. ,n for ear rs soon as breakfast
- }cr."- Exchange.
half believe that there's skcIe-
/ non in the kissmore's closet II
/ shouldn't wonder one day when
/ Il isgmore took me home with him un-
cxpcctcdly TO dinner, thought heard
/ # throwing things at him out in the
J Kitchen Exchange.
Squire's Daughter Ito gardeners
wife. who suffers from chronic rheu-
uotfsml-Haye you ever tr.'d Swel-
ish massage, Mrs Brown? Mrs Browu
/ hatp heard say II he very good