The San Francisco call., 1905-08-04


They had spoken in accustomed tone.
acquired through necessity Of having
their speech understood by those to whom
it was addressed amid the constant din
in the Joshua Hendy machinery and
boiler mandatory, where they were en-
pIoyed as blacksmiths.
"All right was the judicial condone-
ment. Now. what about their alleged
peace disturbance in this hall?"
II was in the Office of the Warrant and
Bend Clerk that the Eithers offended.
They were intoxicated when they vocifer-
ously endeavored to inform Tim Fitz-
patrick that they desired to have the
wife of one Of them arrested for disturb
ing his peace by means of her vocal
loudness.
well, you needn't shout" said the
usually urbane Tim" to the twain.
Then they shouted more loudly than
ever, and their language was not only
condemnatory of the lady of whom they
complained but also abusive of him
whom they addressed. When requested to
depart and return when they were sober,
they fairly roared refusal. so there was
nothing else for Mr. Fitzpatrick to do in
the line Of self-defense than to summon
police aid.
\ DIDN'T KNOW WAS BREAKING
THE PEACE said the younger defend
ant, and though he had evidently endeav-
ored to modulate his voice its reverbera-
ton brought in another crowd of loiterers
from the lobby.
Il am inclined to believe you speak the
truth. responded the bench, ''and l hope
you will refrain from speaking any more
until you are beyond earshot of this
semblage. Go home"
Several attorneys interchanged puns on
the surname of the defendants, but none
OF the flights a wit would find acceptance
by any journal other than Puck or
Judge.
"A stupid mistake sir-a stupid mis-
take" said John McQuaid when asked
what he had to say in response to the
charge that he willfully consumed one
beefsteak in a Market-street restaurant
and pleaded lack of funds Wnen the bill
for the same was presented to him. His
mien was dignified and he spoke with
forensic deliberateness.
What do you 90 for a living or do
you do anything?" Judge Fritz inquired.
Il have the honor to be Of your pro-
fession-Fm an attorney at law was the
answer.
why did you eat the steak when you
had no money to pay for it?"
LAS ] have already stated to the court,
/ am the victim of a stupid mistake-a
stupid mistake. ! accepted an invitation
to dine with a client, and while we were
discussing some intricate phases of law
suit in which he is the plaintiff and l am
his counsel, he received an unexpected
summons to his place of business and
left me temporarily while he responded.
lie had not been given a reasonable time
in which to return when this restaurant
keeper accosted me with his bill.
lit just happened that / had emptied
my purse to relieve a friends urgent
necessity so ! was arrested and given
no opportunity to procure the paltry sum
for which l was held"
That's all tommyrot," said the COM
piainant. He had no companion in my
place. He's a bum"
Beware, sir, exclaimed Mr.. McQuaid,
else your tongue may get you into Sc
rious trouble. There is such a thing as
libel law"
Well" chimed in the bench. addressing
the defendant, "as you have had a free
dinner, the very least / can do for you
is to provide free lodging. Twenty-four
hours"
This matter does not end here" omin-
ously muttered Mr.. McQuaid as he was
led away.
1t was the glare of the day orb strik-
ing his eyes, Henry Stevens pleaded,
that caused him to involuntarily as
sumo the recumbent attitude in which
he was found by the arresting police
man.
While walking along the western
sidewalk of Kearny street, Mr.. Stevens
laboriously elucidated, and passing by
Portsmouth Square he casually glanced
up at the clock in the Hail of Justice
tower, and the sunrays assailed his
optics so fiercely as to momentarily
blind him. Staggering backward. his
heels struck the stone wall surround
ing the park, and next instant he found
himself sitting upon the sward within
the historic spot. Ere he could resume
his perpendicularity an ultra-ofiicious
peace guardian arrested him.
Had he been drinking? No, sir; not
a drop of intoxicating fluid had passed
his lips for a week preceding his in
generation. What was his occupation7
A baker; and he challenged any person
to prove that he did not work when he
could find work to do.
What time of day was 1t when you
fell over the park wall?" Judge Conlan
inquired, with seeming carelessness,
but actual cunning.
Il can't tell you that" was Mr.. ste. ;