The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1905-08-17
HA|HA! NAN AT PORTSMOUTH.
REAL JOKE-HE MIKES UP THE
RUSSIANS SHOES.


y
Pair Of No. ~ Left for witte to Put on
His No. II Feet -Wiiinkcn Draws Felt
Sandals PILOT to Get tho Russians and
Japs Into shufiebsard Contest Fails.
PORTSMOUTH, N. H., Aug. lo.-Late last
nieht a gentleman in a state OF mild en-
thusiasm was found by a porter IN the
annex OF the Wentworth. near the Russian
quarters. Tho porter wanted to know
what he was doing there. The enthusiast
only laughed.
Secret Service men bore down on him
and put him to the torture. He laughed
harder than ever and said something about
the joke Of the century. greatest he ever
saw or heard Of. The Secret Service men
:Sndins that he had no bombs on him, led
him to tho front door. pointed him toward
the outer dark and gave him start. As
he went down the road the gentleman con-
tinued to laugh. He was tho nerriest
thing that has been seen about the peace
conference.
This morning Mr.. Witte rose early, a. Is
his custom. He bathed, kicked of his
bath slippers and rang for his servant
to get his shoes. The Russians following
the European custom, put their shoes
outside the door to be polished during the
night. The Wentworth has chartered .
special bootblack for this service.
As the servant was slow In answering,
Mr. Witte stepped outside in his stocking
feet, brought in his shoes, and started to
put them on. They seemed to have shrunk
in the night Mr.. Witte has No. II foot.
and the shoes with which he was struggling
were dapper sevens.
About the same time Mr.. PROFESSIONALLY
hoped blithely into the hall, grabbed his
shoes and emulated Mr.. Witte. His feet
lost themselves in almond shaped gunboats.
There's only one pair Of feet patterned
like that in the Wentworth They are ap-
pended to M. Pokotiloff, the gigantic Minister
to China. Then M. Wilkinen was heard,
far down the hall. expressing himself in
simple Slavic roots. He was draped in
. bath robe, and in his hands he held the
felt sandals OF Pokotiloffs Manchurisn
servant.
Tho boots Of the Russian bunch had been
thoroughly, effectively, intellectually mixed.
The hotel management started at once to
find the one who had done that terrible
thing. The bootblack protested that he
had put the shoes back where he found
them. The night chambermaid asked
with tears in her eyes why any girl that
wanted to keep her job would be playing
such tricks.
The Secret Service men were called in.
They inspected the evidence, reviewed the
events Of the night and suddenly remem-
bered the merry gentleman with the great
enthusiasm. That was his joke.
1t rained again to-day and 1t Is still cold.
Man IL never content. There is longing
all over the hotel for red hot Broadway or
sticky Pennsylvania avenue. Switchboard
and speculation have worn away the day.
Early in the afternoon the Russian attaches,
or such Of them as were not needed at the
conference. consented to learn Switchboard.
Noting tho popularity Of tho game, the
hotel management came out and offered
Q silver cup for tournament. The Rue
sians, after conference, decided that
1t would not be seemly to enter That
killed an American plot in the egg, for two
Japanese entered and the Americans were
planning to throw their games systemati-
cally, leaving a Russian and Japanese
to contest In the finals.
Boris Souvoirine has reentered the tennis
tournament He drew bye in the first round.
Tomorrow afternoon, IL it does not rain,
he may come to his first game in the series.
There was sunset tonight which brought
the guests out to the piazzas for their coffee
In spite Of the almost frosty air. To the
eastward the sky was rose gray. 1t was
clear and cloudless in the west and the hori-
zon was trimmed with blood red haze There
were other details Of dark waters and dim
woods, but sunsets, as has been mentioned
before are badly overdone. The interest.
ing thing about this sunset was that it was
In the characteristic tones Of a Japanese
print. Hanahira, viewing 1t from the
palm garden remarked this, and took 1t
as q good omen
Third Assistant Secretary Of State PIERCE
had lawn party at his cottage late in the
afternoon. That is; it was billed for a lawn
party; but the rain and chill came, and 30
It was moved indoors and changed into a
tea. Most OF the attaches and under Sec
retaries OF both missions attended. 10
mura and Takahira appeared after the con-
ference and had a cup OF tea. Witte and
Rosen came straight home from the navy
yard.
The loneliest man in the world just now
10 Prof. Martens Of the Russian delegation
Here u his sad plight: The Russians tried to
run him in as delegate, but the Japanese
wouldn't stand for it. 1t is not consonant
with tho dignity Of 80 great an authority
on international law to be a simple secre-
tary. The occupation Of Martens is gone.
Now and then wooing couple wandering
through the grounds comes upon an old
gentleman sitting on bench reading.
1t is Martens killing time.
A pessimist Of the war party looked after
him yesterday and said He is the author
of monumental work in seventy-six
volumes on the treaties Of Russia. He is
over here to explain this treaty and there
amt going to be no treaty"
GIRL o. THE WOODS CAUGHT.
Al Largo for Three Weeks In Mems Attire
weak From Fasting.
sANpusxY, Ohio, Aug. ie.-After being