Gilpin observer., 1905-01-12
A Column
Storyettes
Grave and Gay, Historical, EpI-
grammatic and Otherwise.


travelling in Germany a man sitting next
to him at dinner in a hotel ordered a
bottle OF johannesburg wine. When. it
Of Moselie. and called to it the attention
OF the manager, who exclaimed: "Ach!
S,m Mhat 10 n', stupid donkey distinctly told
A foreign diplomat in conversation with
ton over the announcement that the lat
ter was to continue in the cabinet. He
also also congratulated the Secretary, who is
pearanee. All" said Mr., Hay in sorrow
ful full fashion. you forget that ! suffer
expressed astonishment at this statement,
and asked the nature of the malady. "Old
age said Mr. Hay.
James Mcneil whistler once visited an
artist in Paris. who was not overburden-
ea,sS ed with this worlds goods. and was sur
On being asked how he managed to live
so we'll his host replied: II have pet
monkey. which | let down from my win
and trust to Providence. Sometimes Jacko
returns with loaf. sometimes with a
ham. His visits are full of surprises
one never knows what may appear"
OF every hundred tourists who visit
the Canary islands. quite seventy-ive
are ar British. Naturally. therefore. the
feets England 1t is perhapss a pity Pity that nat
less appalling. but their very 0' disresara saa
for accuracy lends a certain charm" to
their conversation. A man in a barber's
world which was nailed to the ' Wall and
putting his forefinger upon Spain, he ex-
claimed: III war breaks out Spain must
English ships may come down to us be-
cause it is all downhill, but after we
have crippled them they will not find it
it is ali uphill
ON the closing night of her farewell ell
gagement in New York the late Mrs. Gill
metaphor of Kipiing. Six seats in the
orchestra were occupied by as many men
with white hair-and lots of it. When
the women began to throw corsage bou-
Quets of violets upon the stage. the six
in question sent their cards to the ven-
ease ss Wdh note
Madam: You are as adorable now as
you Were forty years years age o:. We soI,,, lay our
IN the second row by our white heads
This is a Canadian salutation." MY
verv hest regards to those gentlemen"
mind you get it right-that 1 would be
proud to be mentioned in their prisons as
Our Lady of the Shows.
The man who always butts in" Is al
ways amusing, and frequently annoying
to his victims. One OF the latter class
tells this story in the New York Evening
EVERY morning get two papers from
the news stand al the - M. ferry. befor.
trained to my ways. and regularly tosses
a ---on top of the pile of -..-s. so
that all have to do is S,s to drop cents
went through this proceeding. ana was
well OH my way to the boat when the
saueaky Voice. stopped me. ~
Excuse. me, mister. but you took two
Well !. replied. rather impatiently,
II ~ thought maybe you picked up an
tend to his own affairs hereafter. but
you can't tell: for 1t Is pretty hard to re-
form confirmed busybody.
A woman lives at one of the Kansas
City hotels, says the journal, who has
hard to please in the matter of food. A
day or so ago at lunch after looking over
the dessert list, she decided on some ice
cream pudding. The meal had been one
with which she had had considerable diff
fculty in finding any Tlult. but when she
had about half-finished the dessert she
George. what do you mean by calling
this ice cream pudding? There isn't any
ice cream about it. and you know DOW it, do,
amt no ice cream in it. OATS jes name
they give it. / do know why, 1g;. ,,, +.
they give a dish such name they ought
TO make it conform to the name and If
you call this ice cream pudding you ought
"Yesm,' answered the servitor. but
YOU know we can't allus do II that way.
Yen know we doesn't bring a cottage in
with cottage pudding.
= = =
A Bostonian was praising the other day
the astronomical and literary work of
Percival Lowell.
Before the last eclipse he said smil-
ing. Mr.. Lowell observed to an old col
ored man whom he liked:
:" George. If you'll watch the chickens
out at your place tomorrow morning at
II o'clock you'll see them all 20 to
"'Hi. hi George laughed. Hi. hi.
OATS a good joke
''He thought. you see. that Mr.. Lowell
the next morning, the sun darkened and
the chickens did go to roose. George was
amazed and somewhat Mortified. He
sought Mr.. Lowell out and said:
"'Wot you done tole me wuz true, sab.
Nah chickens went to roost. sab, jist
aik yeu saa asy wSula sSnao,e thew did,
How long. sab. did you know bout
dis? said George.
"'Oh. a long time
did you know dey would 20 to roost
year ago?'
"'Yes; fully n year ago.
"'Well. dat beats ALL said George. In
an awed voice. Dem chickens wuznt
hatched year ago.
-
Elbridge T. Gerry the president OF the
New York Society for the Prevention OF
Cruelty to. Children. has a great fund
of children's anecdotes. At n dinner that
was given in his honor few days before
he sailed for Europe on the Rotterdam
he said:
~ am sure I shall remember the kind
ness of all of you as yividly as a certain
little boy remembered his mothers un-
kindness.
''The lad In an unwonted spirit OF dis
obedience, had taken n SO gold piece
that had been given him on condition that
he save It, and he had bought with this
money twenty pounds of candy. The
candy. as soon as 1t came home, was
returned to the dealer and the little boy
was punished.