davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1905-11-20

Everything you eat will taste good
and do good il you take Rings Dys-
pepsia Tablets. Sold by City Drug
Store.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1905-11-20

Girls dream they have curly hair
the way men do that they are John
d. Rockefeller.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1905-11-20

Hope makes a pinhead look as big
as the head OF an egotist feels.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1905-11-20

A woman never claims to be home
ly unless she knows she isn't.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1905-11-20

You can make the terms when yot
Nv n buggy from us. NOBLE BROS
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24
THE LIMIT.

Congressman O'Neill, now deceased,
who represented one of the Philadel-
phia districts in Congress for many
years, used to tell a story regarding
two friends Of his who were carpen-
ters. These men led very good lives,
but, unfortunately. they were addicted
to the habit Of profanity. One morn
ing, in sincere desire to cure them
selves of the bad trait, they resolved
that, no matter what happened during
the day, they would abstain from in
decent language. After they had been
working for about an hour the first
man accidentally dropped his hammer,
and it fell on his foot, bruising it very
severely.
"Ouchr' was his only exclamation.
He made a sour face, &nd then con-
tinued with his work.
Things went well for about another
hour, wnen, happening to be in con-
versation with his friend the hammer
slipped, ard be dealt his thumb ter
rife blow.
by 1iminyr' was his exclamation;
but that was all He was a hero, and
determined to keep the compact.
They had about finished the days
work, and were walking under a scaf-
folding, when the unfortunate carpen-
ter, forgetting to bend, struck his fore
head severe blow on the end OF a
ioist. 1t cut the skin and tore away
part Of his hair.
He stepped aside, and for the next
three minutes the air was blue. His
friend listened with an amused smile,
and then said:
How about your agreements"
"Well," was his response, II didn't
mind mashing my toe and thumb, but
when they tried to take my scalp it
was time to protest" Harper's Week
lr
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24
Non To BE FOoLED.

Uncle Cyrus had come up from the
country to visit his nephew, Charles
in town. Charles had shown the old
gentleman the sights untiI he was al
his wits end for further entertainment
One morning. however, he noticed in
the paper that "The Imperial italian
Band" was still giving its celebrated
open-air concerts. Uncle Cyrus said
he should like to hear them play.
AS the concert progressed Uncle Cy-
rus waxed enthusiastic. Toward the
end Of the programme a solo on the
slide trombone was announced. It
was q really fine performance. and the
audience demanded an encore with a
storm Of applause. Charles noted that
his uncle was among the most apprecia-
tive, but he was somewhat puzzled by
the smile which played around the
corners of the old mans mouth, for the
selection had been mournful rather
than gay. At the conclusion Of the
encore, when the applause had finally
died away, Charles turned to his uncle:
"That was fine, wasn't it?'
Mighty fine, mighty fine" was the
reply. But you city folks are easy
fooled. He didn't fool me a bit.
knew all the time he was playing that
he wasn't really swalering that
thing"-Youth's Companion.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24
smith vs.. smI.I,.

Mr.. Talemon Cruger Cuyier Smith,
who wants to change his name to
Smith Talemon Cruger Cuyler, or some
thing like that, has struck a snag ir
his proceedings and life's young dream
threatens 10 resolve itself into a night
mare.
A certain Mr. Jack Smith, who seems
to be also somewhat of a jokesmith,
has announced his intention of oppos-
ing the petition of Mr.. Talemon ct Get
terra Smith.
He swears by the fame OF all the
other 100000 Smiths alive and the
shades of the unlimited billions dead
and gone, that Talemon ct cetera
Smith, being born Talemon ct cetera
Smith, shall remain Talemon ct ceterS
Smith to the end of time. SO swears
Mr.. Jack Smith, himself to fame and
fortune yet unknown, but who bids
fair to become known to posterity as
the noblest Smith Of all the Smiths now
extant.
We have no personal concern in this
highly elevating controversy. and il
Mr.. Talemon ct cetera Smith wants
TO change his good name to something
else more to his fancy. we have no OBJ.
iections. But we do admire the
doughty courage of Jack Smith who
glories in the name of Smith and
swears all Smiths shall remain Smiths
to the end of time if no longer When
ever or wherever the name Of Smith
is assailed with unhoIy hands there
you will find Jack Smith with the little
hammer. ready, willing and anxious to
scrap with the assailant "Once a
Smith, always a Smith" is the motto
under which Jack sails down the
stream Of time
The situation is, to say the least.
very peculiar Here is Mr.. Taemon
ct cetera Smith appealing to the courts
to change his name. Here is Mr., Jack
Smith appealing to them not to do So
Under all the circumstances. we see
nothing for the Smiths to do but TO
get together and take the whole thing
to The Hague. 1t is an international
question, anyhow The millions ana
millions Of Smiths across the pond
have some rights in this matter and we
respectfully put in word for them
herewith.
70 The Hague, oh, Smiths. Rome
(Ga.) Tribune.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24
NO oFFENsE MEANT.

Congressman Dixon, Of Montana, is
telling Of the experience of a young
Eastern woman with one of his con.
stituents. She left the train at way.
station in Eastern Montana one after
noon and asked the only man in sight
how she could get to her destination,
far out in the country. you'll have
to wait for the stage in the morning,
said the man; you can't get any rig
here" "But where am ! 10 stopT' in
quired the young lady; there's moth
ing here but the station and can't
sleep on the floor" "Guess you'll have
to bunk with the station agent" "Sirr'
she exclaimed; Il am a lady,. "So's
the station agent" said the man.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24

A ham is greatly improved II after
being boiled It is wrapped in buttered
paper and baked for an hour.
II can of milk is placed near an
open vessel containing turpentine the
smell Of turpentine is soon commune
Gated to the milk. The same result
occurs as regards tobacco, paraftin, asa
tetida, camphor and many other strong
smelling substances. Milk should be
kept at a distance from every volatile
substance, and milk which has stood
In sick chambers should never be used.
When taking feathers from a pillow
or a tick to put into new one the lat
ter must be stitched all round except
for space, say, OF ten inches. In the
former rip a hole TO correspond, sew the
two tightly together, and by pushing
and shaking the feathers will pass into
the new receptacles with not bit Of
down or fun flying about
II is well to remember when papering
small room that blue in all light
shades makes room look longer. Dark
colors or papers with large patterns
have the opposite effect.-New York
Globe.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24
TIMELY ADVICE.

When the financial panic of 1893
broke out. the senior editor of a trade
journal published in the interests of
business men and financiers was on a
visit to a mining town in the far West.
Fearful lest his junior, in the Office at
home, might give editorial utterance
to pessimistic views and weaken pub
lie confidence still further, he hastened
to telegraph Office and despatched a
brief message of advice.
1t happened that the junior partner
on this particular day had just become
the father of pair of fine twin boys.
While his friends in the office were con-
graduating him upon this event, a mes
senger entered with telegram He
opened it, and read the following mes
sage from the senior partner:
Dear George. Things look blue. but
they will brighten up soon. Take a
cheerful view Of the situation. Hiram. f"
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24
ohintr.Linsd chInn olo.st..

"A collector of old and rare china orig
mated most attractive way Of show
ing off her treasures. She had made
for her dining-room two quartered
golden oak china closets Of colonial de-
sign, with four shelves. she covered
the walls OF the closets and the shelves
with glazed lowered chintz Of rather
snowy pattern. She tried to pick out
plates and other pieces Of china with a
flower design. China closets could also
be lined with brocade or even denim,
but the ones lined with pretty fiowered
chintz seem to be the most attractive.
China shelves bordered with chintz
and hung on the wall are also new and
very effective New Idea Magazine.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24
NoT on HER AccouNT.

Mary c.. the six-year-old daughter
OF a Presbyterian clergyman in small
Georgia village, had a playmate. jim
my by name, Of whom it was her Gus
tom to make a special mention in her
evening prayer at her mothers knee,
One evening after some childish quar-
rel, Mrs, c. noticed that the boys
name was omitted from the petition,
and said, Mary, aren't you going to
pray for Jimmy tonight
"No, mother; he's mean, hateful
boy, and I'm never going to pray for
him any more
Her mother made no reply. not wish
Ing TO add fuel TO the fame. and de-
clded to allow the youthful conscience
to work out the problem in its own
way. In few moments she heard the
little girl climb out Of bed, fall upon
her knees, and say, in tone Of guard
ed indiffereuce:
"God, you can bless Jimmy II you
want to. but you needn't do it,An mr.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24

M. Silvain, the eminent actor Of the
Comedie Franchise. has succeeded in
adapting automobilism to exigencies
dramatic in way that may be com
mended to the touring companies Of
other nations 1t certainly beats the
railroads hollow and opens up bewiI-
dering possibilities. NJ. Silvalns
troupe is travelling through Tunis and
the number Of turns" they can crowd
into a single day by use of The flying
motor certainly beats all records in
legitimate drama. Thus one evening
they reached Sfax at 7.30 o'clock and
exactly at $50 the curtain rose At
5 next morning they were off again.
reaching Sousse at lip. m, and at $50
the matinee began. London Globe.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24

A beautiful color effect was secured
at a dinner recently. On the long table
was a series of French baskets of roses
shading from American beauty to
white. The basket at the lower end
Of the table was in the American
beauty, the next basket bore roses Of
a lighter shade, the third a deep pink,
the fourth pale pink and the fifth
basket bride roses. Tied TO these bas-
kets were ribbons in the omber shades
Of rose. The candles between the bas-
kets were the same shades as the diff
ferent roses and the electric lights Of
the chandelier were hooded in rose silk
shades Of varying hues.-What to Eat.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24
M. iM. Y q
HtREdPES|INH !
N - NrF

Fried Pies-Soak dried apples (after
washing) in cold water over night,
stewing them till tender in just enough
water to cover. Mash through a sieve
and season with sugar, salt and spice
to taste. Cook till thick, then lay a
spoonful on a circle Of pastry, turning
one-half over the apple, pressing the
edges closely together. Brush the pas
try over with beaten egg, and fry in
deep, hot fat six minutes.
Potato Custard Pie-Tor one pie,
press sufficient cooked potato through
ricer 10 make half pint, adding half
a cupful Of sugar, quarter of cup
full Of butter, the grated rind and juice
from half a lemon. Beat the yolks OF
three eggs very light, add half cupful
OF sugar and stir smoothly into the
other mixture. then add the stiffly beat
en- whites Of three eggs, and proceed as
for custard pie.
Peach Puffs-B Beat two eggs very
light, add one-half a cupful Of milk. a
pinch OF salt, one cupful Of -four with
which has been sifted one heaplng tea
spoonful Of baking powder and one
tablespoonful Of melted butter. If
necessary, add half a cupful more flour.
Butter small deep cups, put in spoon
full Of batter slices OF peaches and
cover with the batter. Steam half an
hour and serve with either hard or soft
sauce.
Cocoanut Bonbons-Take two cupfuls
Of sugar, half a cupful Of desiccated
cocoanut, half a cupful OF milk and boil
all together for five minutes. Pour
out part Of this on buttered plate to
harden. Divide the remainder into two
portions, leave one in the kettle and
pour the other into another saucepan.
Add to this a few drops Of cochineal or
n little strained cranberry, to turn 1t a
pretty pink. Stir just long enough to
get the coloring to take evenly, and
turn out to harden. To the last por-
tion add two tablespoonfuls of melted
chocolate. Cook for two minutes and
turn out to cool. II you have any difl-
Guilty in managing the recipe in this
way the three different flavorlpgs can
be made separately. ~. ~.~--- 'e--.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24
LEGAU AMENTTTEs.

Senator Bailey, of Texas. is fond OF
telling stories of his youthful struggles
at the bar of that State.
About the first case that came AIr,
Bailey's way was one in which he had
been retained to defend a rather tough
character in an action for damages.
AS the plaintiffs case was short, the
attorney soon resting, Mr.. Bailey says
he thought he had fair chance to get
his man off. But, to his DISNEY, the
three or four different motions that he
made were promptly overruled By the
court. Then, says Mr.. Bailey, he en-
deavored to see what little eioquence
would do, and began a laboriously pre-
pared address to the court.
"Your honor" observed Mr.. Bailey,
''my unfortunate client"
"There the court is with you,e gently
interrupted the judge, with a grim
smile.
And the future Senator lost his case.
Golfers.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24
WANTED MS FEELIN's HURT.

An old negro who has been working
for a Southern cotton-planter for a
generation or more, came to his en-
ployer the other day and declared his
intention Of quitting. What's the
matterT was asked him. "Weli, sab,
yer manager Alistah Winter. aint
kicked me in de las free mumfs." Il
ordered him not to kick you any more.
/ don't want anything like that around
my place. | don't want any one to
hurt your feelings. Nose" EFF don't
git any more kicks Use goin' to quit.
Ebery time AIistah Winter used ter
kick and cuff me when he wuz mad he
always git 'shamed Of hisself and glm-
me a quarter. Use done los enuff
money Already who dis heah foolish
ness bout hurtin' ma feelin's."
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24

A reporter IN his rounds for news
yesterday asked owen Carnes when he
was to be married. He replied that
he thought lie would put the event on
until June, when he would so mp in
the Ferris wheel at the Lewis 4 Clark
Fair and have the knot tied. The same
question was put to Postmaster Mat
thews It being known that be is in The
market, and his ready reply was:
lust as soon as | can get any one Ia
have me-" Girlshere is a chance
Pilot Rock (Ore) Record.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24

Little Mary says the New York
Times, is born searcher after nfor-
nation, and Tommy. her brother, Is
always ready to supply her With ~
Mary was poring over d large book
she had seen her father reading the
night before. ~P-h-i-l-o-s-o-p-h-e
she spelled, Iaboriously. Then after a
moments inward struggle, she said.
philosopher, What's that Tommy =
"Huhlp said Tommy. 4 should think
you'd know. Its man who rides 4
philosophers"
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24
AN ALARMING SYMPTOM

Patients often have such absurd
ideas about thingsl' sighed the doctor
in charge Of the tuberculosis division
Of the hospital, says the New York
Tribune. Now there's the subject OF
hemorrhages. ] had a patient brought
in here who was said to be a bad case.
He had been on an egg-and-milk diet,
yet was no better. l asked him if he
had ever had hemorrhage, and he
said that he had had one very bad
one.
TEL me about IT. said l. How
were you taken?
Well said he, L got hit OH the
head with a stick. 1t bled awful, and
the doctor said it was bad hemor-
rhage. He had TO take eight stitches
to stop it,
An Irishman occupied a bed in the
tuberculosis ward, and one morning. as
passed his bed, / asked;
"'Well, Pat, do you raise anything? 2
''IIe didn't understand me.
ado you raise anything when you
cough? 2 l said again; but as he couldn't
get what meant through his head, /
went of. In a few moments he called
me back.
no doctor, he said, I've been mo-
ticIng, and ! do Every time cough
/ raise me right leg"
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24

a simple way for the housewife to
test the eggs from newly-found nest,
pr purchased from the grocery, is to put
them in a pan of water. If they are
perfectly fresh they will go to the bot
tom and lie still, directly on their sides;
If not quite fresh they will tilt a little
and rock about, and If very bad, will
float on top Of the water. 1t is best to
try an egg at a time-AIrs. Bessie
Gross, in The Epitomist.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24
A THREATENED REMOVAL.


Colonel William seveley, of Musko-
gee, Indian Territory, was thoughtfully
regarding himself in a looking-glass
that, strangely enough, was within his
vision when that vision was not OBJ
scured By a man in a white jacket.
"In some manner" said Colonel Seye-
ley, 81 overdrew my account at one of
the banks in my hourishing town.
Next day l happened into the bank.
Mr.. Seveley,' said the cashier, you
have an overdraft.'
"'All right I replied. Next day
happened in the bank again and was
reminded Of that overdraft, and the
same thing happened on the following
day.
Then / stopped that species of an
noyance. Now, look here. I said, if
you don't stop pestering me about that
overdraft, I'll move it to another
bank. Washington Post.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24

Atlantis. the first newspaper pub
lished in Greek in the United States
and founded in New York City twelve
years ago by Scion ]. Vlasto as a week.
", has become daily paper. The
editor explains that this is owing to
the increase Of the Greek population
here, there being now nearly 100, 900
Greeks in this country.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24
Household
MATTERS


A mixture that is put into bags for
the baths, and is delicious, is composed
Of one-half pound Of marshmallow
flowers, one-quarter of a pound Of hys-
sop herb, and four pounds Of bran -four.
Mix thoroughly, and then fill about
three-quarters full bags Of cheese cloth
about four inches sauare.-Philadel-
phia Bulletin.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24

Outside the polar regions there re-
mains unexplored, 1t is claimed. about
one-hftieth o. the land surface OF the
globe. Fifteen years ego the unknown
portions were about one-eighth Of the
earth's total.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24

Because he followed funeral lead
ing a dog by cord which happened to
be colored. carpent-r at Gorlitz, in
Prussia, has been ser need to nine
months imprIscnmc. .''for an offense
against rel
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24
PLAYED IT on THE DOCTOR.

PLAYED 1T ON THE DOCTOR.
"The meanest man ever knew
said Representative Ryan, of Buffalo,
was a chap who came to the house of
a doctor who is trying to build up a
practice on the east side in Buffalo
one night during the Christmas holi-
days. 1t was showing and very cold.
Doctor he said, what are your
terms:'
lone dollar for an Office visit and
two for CALL the doctor replied.
Have you a horse@
eyes
"'Well, hitch up and I'll 90 along
with you. I need you out West SEN
eca a ways
The doctor had his horse brought
around and the man got into the buggy
with him. They drove about four
miles out into the country.
Here's the place. said the man. as
they reached a frame house. Then he
handed the doctor 50.
"'You needn't 20 in he said. "A
liyeryman wanted to charge me So to
bring me out here, but thought
would rather give you So"
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24

A man hopelessly lost in The busI in
South Australia, after wandering about
for four days, came across The tele.
graph line between Adelaide and Port
Darwin. He had not the strength to
go further, but managed 10 break the
wire. He then made himself as com.
Portable rs possible and waited. The
telegraph repairers were sent along
the line, and they cam to the wan
derer in time to save his life.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24
DROLL STORES OF THE
PASSING MOMENT.
alQn0@@@00MMn0 ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS l0MMn0MQnI

account. nt."-Luci (, II. Boggs, in the
Editors Drawer, Harper's Magazine.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24

They have a queer way Of holding
auctions in Japan, ana these afiars
are entirely without noise. The auc
tioneer puts up the object TO be solo
and asks for bids on Is Each bidder
then writes his highest price on bit
of paper and deposits it in box. The
box is opened and the object given lc
the one who has offered the most foI
it.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24

When the present Gar was Care
witch he was attacked by 4 fanatic IN
Otsu, Japan, aud two inrikislla hcn
assisted in rcseUng him from lis as-
sailant. They hare received q pension
from Russia ever since. This year it
was forwarded to them asusuai, mscA
to their surprise.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24

The most remarkable photographs OF
lightning on record havc been made by
a Hamburger nsaol Waiter. ana are
reproduced in the .lunalen Ger physik.
They show that q flash lasting cisl'
ten thousandths Of second is preceded
by ut least five smaller flashes separat
ed by four ten thousandtbs of Il sec
ond.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24

A feature Of low street life In Toxic
is the "kuisha,s or moxa doctor. who
applies small pads made Of dried herbs
to the skin, then setting Them alight,
the ensuing Dlisters being supposed to
be most effective as cure for various
ailments.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24

Baron HancSo says that ihc wcil-ts~
do Japanese live about The same as
Americans. For breakfast thcy have
coffee from the Philippines, with con-
densed milk from Chicago. bread made
from Minneapolis -four, a paper printed
on pulp from Wisconsin and a cigarette
from Cairo.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-02-24

United States, including
Alaska, is about thirty
inches. That is, If it rained
the same amount every