davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-26

he put his foot on it and growled, and
about hundred hornets gave him his.
He gave an Abyssinian cough that
woke all the animals, and then the
hornets scattered and before l knew
it the zebras were dancing a snake
dance and all of them were bowling
as though they were in the ark, hun
CRY, and the ark had landed on Mount
Ararat.
Just then one of the assistant man
ayers beckoned to me to lead in my
procession and we lighted the candles
in our Chinese lanterns. 1 didn't stop
to see how the animals got along with
the hornets, but l couldn't help think
ing that If one hornets nest could
raise such a row, what would a hundred
or so do when we got to going in the
other tent?
"If Had Only Died!"
Oh, if I had only died when I was
young, 1 never would have witnessed
that sight. The band played "Therell
Be a Hot Time in the Old Town To-
night" and pas crowd of white trash
marched around the big outside ring
shouting, Bryan, Bryan, what's the
matter with Bryan?" and the audience
got up on it's hind legs and yelled
that is the white folks did-and then
we marched around the other way,
and yelled Teddy Is the stuff! Teddy
Is the stuff" and the negroes in the
audience yelled.
Then my crowd met pas crowd right
by the middle ring, where the elephants
had formed the pyramid that closes
their act, and the Japanese jugglers
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-26

may be one of the identical animals?
He shudders and waves it away.
Mrs. Lysander consulting list again)
Meat only once a day Dear me!
Isn't that the most vexing thing? l
had pork chop for lunch. She also
passes
Mr.. Tilbury (fxirg eyeglass)-No
beef for me. thank you. Only white
meats for rheumatism. You will. par
don me if 1 take another tablet?
Mrs. Tilbury is still busy counting
the croquettes, and does not notice the
butler at her elbow.
Mrs. Denslow (playfully)-Well
Charles, you and I will have to eat the
whole of this roast.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-26
Ex-Governor of Wisconsin>.

go into the dressing room at about the
same time. The manager had timed
it for us to come in about $3.50 into the
main tent, when the elephants were
in their pyramid act, so my crowd of
negroes stopped in the menagerie tent
half an hour waiting to be called.
/ wish / wasn't so confounded curl
ous but 1 suppose ! was born that
way. 1 took one of the Chinese Ian
terms that was not lighted and just
thought l would like to see what the
hyenas and the big lion in the same
cage, with an iron partition between
them, would do if O. Chinese lantern
was put in the cage so l got the fell
low that watches the cage to open up
the top trap door, and 1 dropped a
Chinese lantern with hornets nest in
1t right between the two hyenas.
Gee, but you ought to have seen
them pounce on it, and bite it and tear
it up, and then the hornets woke
up, and they didn't do thing to that
mess of hyenas.
The Hornets Woke Up
The hyenas set up a grand hailing
sign of distress, and howled pitiful,
and the lion raised up his head and
looked at them through the bars as
though he was saying, in a snarling
way:
What you grave robbers bowling
about? Can't you keep still and let the
czar of all the animals enjoy his after
dinner nap?"
Just then the hyenas kicked what
was left of the hornets nest under the
bars into his side of the cage, and
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-26

Mr. Denslow (uneasily)-Would like
to. my dear, but the doctor won't al
low me beef; only a little of the juice,
fresh from the abattoir at four in the
morning. 1 am to take nothing but
two quarts of boiled water a day for
the next four days.
Mrs. Denslow sinks into a state of
utter collapse. She does not notice
any of her guests, and eats nothing
herself.
Mr. Tilbury Cleaning forward and ar
resting her attention)-But you, Mrs.
Denslow, you will try some of your
own delicious beef?
Mrs. Denslow (absently)-No, can't;
I'm 'banting.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-26
WHAT FETCHED HER

/ wrote: "Come back my dear. long
70 hear your voice. TO see your
smile"
She. from a rural haven, wrote:
Hadn't l better wait a while2"
1 wrote: TITS very lonesome here
And IL you love me you will come"
She answered: Yes i love you, dear,
But isn't 1t rather hot at homer"
1 wrote: with new fall styles are
hlled
Along Canal the windows bright"
Size answered mo at once, by wirei
EXPECT me homo tomorrow night"
New Orleans Iimes-Democrat.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-26
A GUIDE TO READERS

The Dreamy School of Poetry
Is loved by striplings wise
With long. chaotic matches
And large unsettled eyes.
For inside information
Anent the soul it roars.
All, would you yearn for knowledge?
The Dreamy School for yours!
The Dearie School of Poetry
For lovers Is a boon,
1t squeeZes hands In corners
And oVerworks the moon;
'Tis sweet and soft and slender,
Both tears and sighs it pours.
All. would you Groom to ladies?
The Dearie School for yours.
The Doughnut School of Poetry
Sings loudly of the charm
OF pie-and-cider idylls
With mother on the farm.
'Tis partial to the cabbage,
1t sings of rustic chores.
All, would you scent the clover?
The Doughnut school for yoursl
New York sun.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-26
ENVIRONM EMIT

When a fellow makes an effort to be
good,
And the people all about him think lie
should
Be another kind of chap,
Don't you know it is no snap
To be good?
When a fellow makes en- effort to be
bad.
And the people all about him think he
had
Better be dff'rent chap,
Don't you know 1t is no snap.
TO be bad?
SO be gentle with him-easy, don't you
Know;
he's gone the way he had to so.
If he's good or IL he's bad,
The environment he had
Made him so.
Judge.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-26

Mrs. Newed During the first spaD
Some OF my friends say that you
only married me for my money"
Newed-"Well please don't contradict
them. my dear. l don't want them to
think I'm a fool, Chicago News.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-26
The Bishops Bridegroom

The Rt. Rev. Chauncey b. Brewster,
d. d., bishop of Connecticut told tho
other day of funny experience he had
couple. After the cere-
mony had been performed the bashfuI
bridegroom, who suffered badly. leaned
over and asked, isn't it k-k-kistomary
TO c-c-cuss the bride?'-Boston Herr
aid
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-26
GET BUSY

If dis world seems goin' slow.
Get busy.
1t might be yoh fault you know.
Get busy.
Now an den de loailn' throng
Merely waits foh some one strong
10 be pushin' things along.
Get busy.
If dis world appears too fast,
Get busy.
'Taint no use in beln' .last.
Get busy.
Though yoh disappointments vex,
Keep on tryin' 70 get mex.
Chillun, listen to dis tex
Get busy!
Washington Star.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-26

Lawyer-"Your honor, want an in
terpreter for my client. Judge-"What
language does he speak?" Lawyer
He's a railroad brakeman. St Louis
POST Dispatch,
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-26
AHQks
r.. saa s..as..sassa44s

Characters.
Mr.. and Mrs. Denslow.
Mr.. and Mrs Whitaker.
MIR. and Mrs. Lysander.
Mr.. and Mrs. Tilbury.
Scene.
A dining room with a charmingly dec
Grated mahogany round table, flow
ers, candles, with pink shades, silver,
cut glass, etc.
Two buffers with becomingly grave
countenances.
Mrs. Denslow cleaning upon the
party)--It is such treat to have you
all gathered about us tonight! I said
to Charles Indicating her husband),
when we give our first dinner we
must l}e sure to select only those who
will be absolutely congenial" The
whole success of dinner rests upon
that. My dinners may be small, but
they certainly shall be well chosen.
Trust me for thatl Try these blue
points. Mr.. Whitaker. L am sure you
will like them.
Mr.. Whitaker Gmaking a dissenting
movement)--You must excuse me, Mrs,
Denslow. I never eat oysters. Are
you aware of the dangers that lurk in
a bivalve? Typhoid fever is the least
of them! A brother-in-law of mine in
eating oysters quite unconsciously
swallowed a fragment OF ragged shell
and was dead in an hour. No oysters
for me, thank you, Mrs. Denslow!
Mrs. Denslow Cwithout losing her
equanimity and turning graciously to
Mrs. Whittaker)-You do not share
your husbands fears, Mrs. Whitaker?
You will try the Blue Points?
Mrs. Whittaker-Thank you, I'd like
TO ever SO much, but as 1 always swal-
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-26

Horatio-In dis play am Count Itchy
Itchy and
Brutus-When you come on / COM
mence to scratch-is dat It?
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23
A MOST VALUABLE DISCOVERY.
A Former Columbian Patents Process Which Will
Net Him a Fortune.

Hon. w. S. Barry, president
of the Yazoo-Mississippi Delta
Levee Commissioners, president
of three large oil mills of the
Delta and one of that section 5
leading citizens. has completed
and put into practical a I'd sue
cessful operation process
which enables oil mills to in
crease their output from cotton
seed four to six gallons a ton.
Mr.. Barry's invention has been
tried upon his own mills and
works successfully and he has
taken the necessary steps to
protect his invention and to get
it before the seed crushers of
the South.
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23
THE SPIRIT OF RUSSIAN LIBERTY
Results In The Assassination of Grand Duke serguis
Moscow

Moscow. Feb. 17Whe Duke Sergus driving today from
the Nicholas Palace through the Senate his carriage
followed by law sleigh which
men dressed quick
y Of the Grand Dukes carriage.
The sleigh then allow the
that bomb thrown beneath the carriage The
the explosion broke all the windows of the law and
The city. The blown
nothing The
boted. The Grand instantly killed. His
head blown off, actually separated his which
frightuly mangled
The coachmen killed frightfuly burned
the explosive with which the charged that he died
while being the
neither of whom known the police of them said
SUCCESS.
L don't care have done my job
immense crowd gathered the and made demon
against scattering
revolutionary proclamaions.
Within few minutes after the explosion which occurred at
people might have been gathering of wood
clothing the When the Grand
Elizabeth the Duke Sergus inform
ed the she immediately went to the of the
sassination without waiting put hat cloak.
The gates Kremn closed the of
the authorities
of the Grand Duke taken to the Nicholas Palace
of the arrested by policeman who
the of the assassination
The revolver, but made attempt He
expressed Duchess Elizabeth
her husband Grand Duke ers when the latter
killed.
The reveal his Identity but admitted that
he of the sociaistic revolutionary party
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23
TRANSFERS IN REAL ESTATE.
Confidence in the Stability of Columbus Realty is
Supreme--Begins to Change Hands.

same. Mr.. Stinson owning the
other third. 1t is understood
that the tract will be divided be
tween the present owners ac-
cording to their interests.
Capt. D. D. Stevenson has
purchased from the joint owners
the place just east of the South
ern Railway and the Dodson
Plow Co. known as the John T..
Wood's s place. This is one Of the
most valuable tracts surround
ing Columbus, and one tract of
it, about thirty acres. lies right
on the line of the city water
mains and the Southern Rail
way. 1t is the intention of Capt.
Stevenson to develop this prop
erty this spring and the pubic
will hear more of it later.
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23

A meeting of the City Council
was held at the City Hall last
Thursday night with the follow
ing present: lion. j. t. Gunter,
Mayor; Councilmen j. L. Walker,
D. S. McClanahan, E. S. Moore
and w. L. Gardner, H. NJ. Wad
dell, Secretary and Treasurer.
The special committee appoint
ed tocodify and arrange the char
ter, ordinances and franchises OF
the city made their report. The
committee is composed of Mayor
Gunter, Councilmen Moore and
Stevens and Attorneys Sykes
and Lincoln. The report shows
the amended sections of the
char ter, the ordinances adopted
from time to time and the fran
chises granted to the corpora
tions of the city. After con,
sidering the matter a specia
committee was appoin ted to have
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23

Mr.. A. w, Hampton has pur-
chased the Mayor tract of land
Just north of Columbus advertis-
ed for sale by Mr.. Chas. Sher-
rod. The tract is valuable for
dairy and trucking purposes and
no doubt will oe so used by Mr..
Hampton.
Mr.. w. H. Goodson has sold to
Mr.. T. W. Rowe his lot in Square
No. 15 of Grigby & Hopkins sur
vey. Immediately south of the NJ.
& o. depot. Mr.. Rowe is one OF
the best known mechanics OF
this city and he buys this valua.
BILE lot to build on.
Capt. Dan Stevenson has sold
his third interest in the Brooks
tract to Mr.. Warren NJ. Cox
who now owns two thirds of the
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23

Cotton seed yield in the Delta
from 80 to Al gallons of oil per
ton; in the mills slightly less.
thirty-six to thirty eight and in
the Carolinas the yield is as low
as thirty five gallons per ton.
When it is considered that mil
lions Of tons of seed are crushed
every season and that this pro
cess increases the return from
them fully a dollar ton the val
ue of his invention is realized.
Mr.. Barry is already a wealthy
man but his recent invention
guarantees him a fortune. All
of his friends in this city and
section rejoice to learn of his
increasing prosperity
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23
Came After Prisoner.

Mr.. E. P. Crawford. sheriff of
Bibb county. Ala. was in the
city last Friday. having come
over for the purpose Of taking
William Burton. a negro who
was arrested by the police here
last Tuesday, back to Bibb coun-
ty. Burton. who IS an escaped
convict from the above named
county. has been in Columbus
for some time past. and actually
had the nerve to loaf around po-
lice headquarters. having gone
to the city prison on several oc-
casions to carry food to prison.
ers who were confined therein.
On last Tuesday Chief of Pohce
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23
LANCASTER LANDED IN JAIL AT LAST.
No Friend Comes to His Rescue and He is Jailed
Charge of EmbeZZlement.

". T. Lancas ter, who several
weeks since collected about forty
dollars from the citizens Of Co
lumbus under false pretenses,
was arrested last Tuesday night,
and is being held for the grand
jury to answer to the charge Of
eub ubezzlement. 1t viii be re-
mem bered that shortly after the
Christmas holidays Lancaster
went among our citizens with a
list and collected in various sums
ranging from twenty-five cents
10 a dollar a total of about forty
dollars, which he said was to be
used in paying the fine of George
Lindsay, a white man who had
recently been convicted of run
ming blind tiger. Instead of
paying Lindsay s fine, however,
Lancaster skipped out with the
money, and has since been in
hiding. On last Tuesday night
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23
MEETING OF THE CITY COUNCIL.
The Codfcation Committees Report Received
Minutes Will be Printed.

the same printed in book form.
Mr.. O. L. Wood. who made the
map of the city, appeared before
the Council and after cOnsidera-
tion of his claim the same was
allowed and the Secretary in
structed to pay it.
Gen. E. T. Sykes was elected
City Attorney for the year 1905
at a salary of S250.00, he to rep
resent the city in all cases where
the city is involved and to draw
all deeds for the city.
The matter of discussing the
minutes of the Council meetings
was discussed at some length
and a committee was appointed
to have same published.
A motion was made and adopt
ed that special committee be
appointed to convey the sym pa
thy of the Council to Hon. B. A
Weaver in his illness.
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23

Chief Munger learned that the
man was at the house Of his
father-in-law, Mr.. Martin. who
lives near the Kavanaugh Knit
ting Mill. and Officer Brazealle
was dpta led to arrest him.
At the trial of the case. which
took place before Mayor Gunter
on Wednesday, Lancaster admit
tea his guilt, but claimed that he
was drunk when the money was
collected and therefore was not
responsible for his actions. Mr..
Z. p. Landrum. who represented
the interests of the city, thought
differently, however, and Mayor
Gunter was evidently Of the same
opinion, for he bound the defend
ant over in the sum of S250.OO to
await the action of the grand
jury. Lancaster was unable to
furnish bond. and was lodged in
Jail.
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23

Munger received a tip that Bur-
ton was wanted in Bibb county,
and together with Officers
Shacklef0rd and Noland arrest
ed the negro. Sheriff Crawford
was notified by wire of the ar
rest, and as stated above, came
to Columbus and took charge of
the prisoner, carrying him to
Centreyille. the county site Of
Bibb county. having left for that
place Friday.
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23

During the dull weeks caused
by the extreme weather Mr..
Mason. head of the dry goods de-
partment at Simon Loeb & Bros
dry goods store, has employed
his time and talents IN the direc.
ton Of decorating and his work
has resulted in making such a
change in the interior Of this es-
adjustment that one would
scarcely recognize it. Mr.. Mason
is an artist in this line with fine
ideas which he puts into force
and his work at Loeb's the past
week is as pretty as any ever
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23
CONVENTION OF MASONIC GRAND BODIES
Will Meet in Jackson This Week in Four Days Ses-
sion-The Shriners VIII Have Caravan.

This IS to be an important week IN Masonry Grand
lodges Of the state will convene in Jackson
and it is expected that the will the the
history and Jackson Masons
have made elaborate preparations bodies
have aan annoned from the local lodges every
arrangement the pleasure Of the visiting
brethren has been cousummated.
The Masonic and Odd Fellows lodge
city which amply large for the purpose
o. Ssson will reach jackson to day. and meet
row. 2oh the deputies will be held to exempify
which the Worshpfu Masters OF all the local lodges
in the work are invited
GRAND CoNaANDERY.
The first grand body will be the Grand Commandery
Knights Tempar hold its forty fh annual conclave
Tuesday morning, 21st commencing at 10 o'clock.
The local Mississippi Aberdeen, Coaho
ma Cyrene Delta DeMolay Edwards Greenwood Hatesburg
Hoysprngs Iyanhoe Lexington Magnolia Mary Savery
spp Rosae Elmo The Coast West Point and Yazoo
Mystic SHRNERs.
Hamasa Temple Mystic Shrine will a
Tuesday evening eight o'clock The officers who
charge have been announced but
large pilgrims who will the pill
gmage burning sands The event will be followed by
the traditional banquet
GRAND CHAPTER.
The ffty-sevenh Grand Chapter will
held Wednesday morning, commencing at II o'clock.
GRAND COUNCIL
The Tuesday afternoon, Feb. 21st,
four o'clock. n it's fftieth annual assembly.
GRAND LODGE.
The eighty Lodge
meets Thursday morning II o'clock The officers
are as follows t T. Isson Wino Grand Master H. c. Yawn
Senior Warden Blum Shelby Junior Grand Warden
j. Hunter Grand Chaplain T B. Franklin Columbus
Frederic Speed Vcburg Grand Secretary
Myrev Grand Lecturer; j. H. POrtwOod KOscius
w. Stevenson Holly Springs Junior
W. Denton Hookston. Grand Marshal; j. L.
Williams Grand Sword Bearer; George Hunter Boil
Pursuant; julius Yaresky Shuquaa Grand Tyler
The District Deputy Masters who will with
Grand Master T. Monday IS follows:
District A. Mayfed, Amory; second district S. II.
Oxford; r. Batesvle;
Hicks Greenwood fifth district T. L. Lamb Waltha;
Rhodes West Point seventh district William
Eggeston Lexngon eighth district r. Key Oak Grove; ninth
district L. Solomon Meridian; tenth district NJ Bush Ellis
vile; Cam; twelfth district
A. Tounsson Monticello.
There lodges Mississippi under the
of the Grand Lodge
which greatly interests the people of the State is the
Masonic home This matter has
and expected that it will
the order has ample funds with which
equip having already
dollars that Another matter which is
of the craft the inviting
Columbus It
temple Columbus other advantages
tract people. The members of Columbus lodge No
glad secured for this city next year.
Among will probably the Grand Lodge
Messrs R. A Carson Master of Cou
B. Franklin of the Grand Lodge COL H.
Wade McC1 Walt Weave dothe
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23
IS NOW IN A SLOW CONYALESCENCE.
Hon. B. A. Weaver Passes the Crisis in His MaIady
and is Improving.

Hon. B. = Weaver s friends in
Columbus and elsewhere viii be
glad to learn that he has passed
the crisis ia his attack of pneu-
monia and is gradually improy-
ing. Mr.. Weaver remains un-
conscious except at intervals
when he is aroused but his fever
has almost disappeared and he is
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23

The friends of Miss Anna
Long viii be gratified to know
thai she is conyalescent at the
home Of Mr.. Vim. B. Hamilton.
where she has been quite i'll for
some time past. Miss Long has
been a sufferer with Ia grippe,
but is rapidly convalescing.
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23

grad ually gaining strength. His
respiration is improved and un-
less typhoid complications ensue
he will recover.
just as soon as the condition Of
the sick man warrants he will be
carried by friends to Florida
where he will spend several
weeks convalescing.
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23

The friends Of Mrs. Kate Hop
kins in this city and elsewhere
viii be gratified to learn that she
is convalescent after being quite
III the past week.
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23

seen in this city. All of the dec
orations are merely preparatory
to the spring opening which viii
be on a scale Of magnificence
never before undertaken by this
firm.
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23

Mr., Homer Fitzpatrick, the eff
fcient book keeper of the First
State Bank. is in New Orleans on
a visit. His place is being tenn
porarily filed by Mr.. Fl. L. Bail
ey.
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23

DR.. r. S. Curry leaves tomor-
row for New Orleans. La, where
he will go to take a course in
surgery IN the line Of his special
ties. DR.. Curry viii be absent
several weeks engaged in this
work. visiting the Grand Mason
ic bodies in Jackson on the way
down.
The Columbus weekly dispatch. (Columbus, Miss.) 1902-1905, 1905-02-23

Mr.. S. ". Holmes. "a well
known citizen Of the Robertson
Addition. had the misfortune to
lose his three month old son last
Thursday night. the little one
having been found dead in bed
the following morning. Thesud-
den death Of this little infant
was great shock and sorrow
to Mr.. and Mrs. Holmes which
which called forth the loving
sympathy of many friends.
Mr.. Frank Skinner is bone
again after a visit to Mo-
county.