davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Holbrook argus., 1905-05-13

The good woman was distributing a few tracts behind the bars.
 And what are you in for, my unfor- tunate friend?" she asked of No. 1913. "'Cause can't git out" sullenly answered the prisoner.
 And the goou woman passed on.
Holbrook argus., 1905-05-13
Worthy of Emulation.

"What," asked the youth, lis the se- cret of your happiness and content mentT
 q manage to be just deaf enough not to hear some things and blind enough not to see some others," answered the sage.
Holbrook argus., 1905-05-13
Explained.

"How long have you been here" asked the new attendant at the in- sane asylum.
 Ever since my friends discovered that I knew they were crazy" replied the inmate of the padded cell.
Holbrook argus., 1905-05-13
Sure Thing.

Tess-May is considerably older than Bess.
 Jess-Yes, May practically admitted it to me the other day.
 Tess-YoU don't say?
 Jess-Yes: she said: ''Bess is just about my age."-Philadelphia Press.
Holbrook argus., 1905-05-13
A Quiet Tip.
Gabbleton,

"John," queried Mrs. Gabbleton, "what kind of talk is newspaper talk?"
 "It's the only kind of talk man can indulge in without being interrupted by some woman," answered her husband.
Holbrook argus., 1905-05-13
A Knock.

Neil-Of course, she's not pretty, but it's remarkable how her face lights up when she talks.
 Belle-Oh, that's not so remarkable. She's got lantern jaw.-Philadelphia Public Ledger.
Holbrook argus., 1905-05-13
Lettuce Salad.

Lay crisp leaves of salad in iced water for an hour, then drain and shake free of all moisture. Arrange in a chilled salad bowl and serve with French dressing.
Holbrook argus., 1905-05-13
Brown Betty.

Into the bottom of a greased pud- ding dish put thick layer of peeled and chopped apple. Strew this with bits of butter, few breadcrumbs and a plentiful supply of granulated sugar. Add more apples and more butter, sugar and crumbs and proceed in this way until the dish is full. Some peo- pie like a little cinnamon sprinkled over each layer of sugar Have the top of the pudding of buttered crumbs. Bake for three-quarters of an hour. Eat with hard sauce while hot
Holbrook argus., 1905-05-13
Had Seen It.

Bacon-What an idlotic expression -"went sailing down the street.! Did you ever see man sail" down a street in your life
 Egbert-Yes, in Venice.-Yonkers Statesman.
Holbrook argus., 1905-05-13
An Awful Condition.

Her-Young Windig Is quite a pol ished chap, isn't he?
 Him. should say so. Why, he's so polished that he cant even tell the plain, unvarnished truth.
Holbrook argus., 1905-05-13
Facts ys, Fiction.

Biggs-I do get so tired of the sto- ries Blowitz is always telling about himself.
 Diggs-Huh! They ain't a marker to the facts other people tell about him.
Holbrook argus., 1905-05-13

Dr. Voigt suggests that what are call ed volcanic craters in the moon may be the coral islands or atolls of a lunar sea now dry. The Pacific ocean, if evapo- rated. would, he says, leave mountains resembling volcanic craters.
Holbrook argus., 1905-05-13
That's a Fact.

Capital and labor should go hand in hand" remarked the moralizer.
 "True," rejoined the demoralizer, but the trouble is too many men are trying to get capital without labor"
Holbrook argus., 1905-05-13
Maple Mousse.

Beat the yolks of four eggs thor oughly; add to them a generous maple syrup. Place in double boiler and cook until thick. Stand in a pan of iced water and whip until light and cool. Whip pint of cream; add the maple mixture; give the whole good beating and turn into well-packed freezer. Freeze from three to six hours. Use more salt than for ice cream.
Holbrook argus., 1905-05-13
CuStard.

Heat a quart of milk in double boiler. Beat six eggs light with half a cup of granulated sugar, and on these pour gradually the scalding milk, to which a pinch of soda has been added. Return to the double boiler and cook, stirring constantly, until the custard coats the spoon. Take from the fire, flavor with vanilla and set away to cool.
Holbrook argus., 1905-05-13
Homeless Case,

Hopeless Case. The good woman was distributing few tracts behind the bars. And what are you in for, my unfor- tunate friend?" she asked of No. 1313 "'Cnuse I can't git out" sullenly answered the prisoner. And the good woman passed on.
 Natural Deduction. Bess-I hear Clara married a man who gambles.
 Nell-Of course she did. Marriage Is lottery and any one who takes chances in lottery is a gambler.
 Worthy of Emulation. "What," asked the youth, lis the se- cret of your happiness and content mentT'
 q manage to be just deaf enough not to hear some things and blind enough not to see some others," answered the sage.
 Explained.
  asked the new attendant at the in- sane asylum.
 Ever since my friends discovered that I knew they were crazy" replied the inmate of the padded cell.
 What He Sees. "What illusions" asked the professor, "has a patient suffering from delirium tremens"
 "He sees lizards, snakes, policemen and other reptiles" promptly answered the youthful medical student  How It Happened. Greeting-I understand Gotrox low cred the record with his automobile. Wiserly-Wel, not exactly. He lowered it with his money. Greeting-How's that?
 Wiserly-He bribed the recorder.
 Had Seen It. Bacon-What an idlotic expression -"went sailing down the street,! Did you ever see a man "sail" down street in your life
 Egbert-Yes, in venice.-Yonkers Statesman.
 His Excuse.
 Mrs. Wearyun-I'm sorry I ever married such a lazy man.
 Wearyun-I'm not lazy, my dear. simply don't want to injure my health by working between meals. 
 His Observation.
 She-Do you believe that bleaching the hair will drive person insane? He-Sure thing. I know two fel- lows who are crazy over bleached , blonde. Positively Brutal. Mrs. Gabbles-I have resolved never to say another word about our neigh l bors.
 Gabbles-I suppose that means there Is absolutely nothing more to be said , They Always Do. 1, You'd make big hit if you could f compose the words of popular song." "I guess that's right; all l have ever heard or seen needed composing. ."- : Houston Post.
 Barely Possible.
 He-I wonder why it is that the aver age man is always anxious to know the - worst of his neighbor?
 She-Probably because of the popular e belief that misery loves company. /, Sometimes True. A A dude is like a mushroom
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1905-03-10
X FRUIT LANDS
PRODUCE EARLY CROPS WHICH
BRING FANCY Prices.

In Tcx,s they b,gin shipping
berries Ia April, tom ,torsi In NV,
Peaches In June, bringing fiicv
prices up North.
The growing season ~ much
longer than In tho Morrill, chance
tn make two AL three crops. re-
ducing the expense OF getting
through tbs winter.
Fruit and truck lands along the
Cotton B,lt Route are very ch.tb
as yct-SiO to si5 a, acre unim-
proved. When put to orch ,rj pc
truck they IA b. made u yirli
800 to $500 per acrc and more.
Besides its AN ideal climate-nb
long, cold winters. Write i.r
booklet on fruit aud track growing.
4. W. LABEATME, q. y. n 7. A.,
Cotton Bclt Route, st. Louis, NJ.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1905-03-10
RhInoiand Record.

Miss Laura Duffy has accepted
a position as clerk In Hcying Bros.
4 Co.'S store.
Frank Holtwick who had his
finger cut oil last week Is getting
along nicely.
Otto Hcying was confined to his
bed several days this week with
La Grippe.
Aug. Gloe Of Columbia Is visit
ing relatives rear Americas.
Louis Hagcdorn moved Monday
to the farm he recently purchased
near Slater, Mo.
Gcrd Pottebcaum OF ncar this
place and Miss Katie kaufman OF
near Owensvillc were married last
Tuesday in the Catholic church at
Hermann.
Monnig h Antoine have put a
number OF glass show cases In
their store, which greatly improves
Its appearance.
John Bowling last Saturday
purchased the Mrs. l.. Bowling
farm, 3 miles north oftown. Con.
sideration $4,000.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1905-03-10
Middiotown Chips.

Rolla LsiIerty Is up from st.
Louis on u lay-ofr during the dull
street car scason there.
j. W. Gin and wife Of Mont
gomcry were here Wednesday Of
last week, the guests Of Miss Dixie
Farmer.
Harvey Davidson's boys, over
near Elkhorn Creek, have trapped
~ minks this season, and realized
S25 for their coats. Good record.
While hauling fodder on Nom
day last at his home In the Swopc
district, Bert Meyer fell from the
load and the wagon passed over
his leg, breaking II.
Will Pcrscll started yesterday ,
Wednesday, for Montana, where
he will take charge OF a ranch
belonging to Billie Douglass, the
Wcllsville base ball player. Mr..
Pcrscll Is a good man for the place.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1905-03-10
Weiisvmie Optic-News.

Mrs. DR.. Hudson attended the
funeral Of her aunt, Mrs. A. II.
White, at Montgomery City Tues
day.
Mrs. Mary Snow, wife Of Milton
Snow, aged about u years, and
living q miles west Of Middlctown,
was found dead In bed ut her home
on last Friday morning.
Rev. Il. u. Thompson has ac-
cepted a call to a pastoratc under
Rev. l.. II. Shumate, prcsidin q
elder In the West Nebraska con =
ference, aud will leave for his field
about the middle Of next week.
y. $. Fuller has given up the
road and turned granger. lie
moved with his family to his far
southwest Of town this week
where he will cultivate chickens.
pigs and milk the cows instead OF
-clling Stone ware.
j. II. Johnson moved with his
family to Believer this week
where he has built a fine residence
and where they will reside In the
future. We regret to lose Mr..
Johnson and family ~ they are
excellent people. Miss Ola will
remain here until school closes.
Col. Whitney and his head drill
man. Mike o'Kccfc. came In last
Saturday and commenced work
on the Burlington deep well near
the Burlington depot. They expect
to go from 800 to 800 feet deeper
or TIL they strike a sum Gent dow
OF water for all purposes or strike
n gold mine, oil gu-hcr or natural
gass.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1905-03-10
Hugo.

Henry Patton, colorcd, one OF
the victims OF alcohol. IL now
dead and buried. lie was KIN own
Is an honest man but but was too
fond of something to drink"
Wedding bells have been heard
ringing about tho residence OF
little Fritz Grabcnstcin aud Il Is
reported that something Is to take
place there or at Mr.. Strubc's
some time this week.
j.. l.. Wood is Improving the
farm on which he resides. lie
has built q large barn, and will
plant a large orchard In the spring.
Miss Abbie Hsislip Of Wells
willie will soon close a ssful
term OF school ut Hugo. She
Intends to have m exhibition on
the night ofthc nth Of this month.
Ford Niece, colorcd, was ar
rested and fined 81 aud costs at
New Florence a short time ago for
disturbing the peace. lie Is said
TO have beaten a coiorcd boy with
his fists, cut a colored man with a
knife and threatened the lives Of
two or three white men.
UPsON Downs.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1905-03-10
New Florence Leader.

Mis-, Louise Nunnclly has closed
her school neal Shamrock aud IL
home again. Her friends are glad.
Chas. Wilson leaves next week
to take course In cmbalming.
John Knox was down around
Rhineland Monday looking after
good horses.
Mrs. Dora Mcdaniel will move
back to town and occupy rooms
up stairs in Aubrey Kallmeycr's
building.
Miss Lydia Kallmcyer left Ia st
Friday on an extended visit with
friends In Fulton, Jefferson City
and Rhineland.
Mark Jennings, who has been
living on the Taylor farm, has
bought a small place near Buell.,
and will move there at once. John
Worley will occupy the place va.
Gated by Mr.. Jennings.
Rocco Hughes Of Wellsville fell
on the Ice last week ane broke his
collar bone.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1905-03-10
COUNTY NEWS
The TRIBUNE Wants Correspondents
In all Parts of Montgomery County.
milestone Htlto.

The weather has been fair and
che grass Is beginning TO grow at
this writing.
Mrs. Lizzie Kcelc has been sick
for the past two weeks.
Bob Caruthers and sons Of Mont
gomcry visited at w. c. woolron-
croft's Sunday.
There was preaching at New
Providence church Sunday.
Miss Mabel woolsoncroft has
returned from q visit to her grand
mother In Illinois.
Doran Hall was In Montgomery
City on business Friday.
Mansc Weeks bought some
calves last week.
Peter See Of New Florence
bought two mules Of II. Will for
$40 last Tuesday,
John T. Sailor IL still confined
20 his bed with rheumatism.
Homer kcclc was In Danville
Sunday.
John Crews and family who have
been keeping house for Mansc
Weeks have moved to Ben Elliott's
place. James Gibson will now
keep house for Mr.. Weeks.
Warren Sailor caught some nice
fish the first Of the week. This Is
the first we have heard OF being
caught this season.
Edmond Cobb who has been
sick Is out again.
Edward Pcvclcr bought some
corn OF Chas. Ward last week.
TIE HUSTLER.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1905-03-10
4 X WONDER.

One small bottle OF the Texas
Wonder, Halls Great Discovery,
cures all kidney and bladder
troubles, removes gravel, cures
diabetes, seminal emissions, weak
and lame backs, rheumatism and
all Irregularities of the kidneys
and bladder In both men and
women, regulates bladder troubles
in children, II not sold by your
druggist, will be sent by mail on
receipt Of 81. Ono small bottle IL
two months treatment and seldom
fails to perfect . cure. DR.. 4. w.
Hall, folc manufacturer, p. O. Box
61o, st. Louis, Mo. Send for tes-
Hmouisls. Sold by all druggists.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1905-03-10

Miss Mollie Stuart IL sick.
Chas. Llchte 10 on the sick list.
Miss Lola Hagerdorn was visi.
ting Miss Annie Norman Sunday.
Robt. Walker and wife Of Mont.
gemery visited relatives In this Vi.
cinity Sunday.
John Kocnig and family and
Taylor Laucr left Monday for
Granite City. where they have en-
ployment In q steel foundry.
Tcodore Psulsmcycr and brother
Otto Of Usage county were visiting
their uncles Henry and August
Sticgman Of this vicinity Sunday
and Monday.
G. L. Bookseller and family
spcnt Sunday with v. II. Burks
and wife.
b. +. Dixon and wife spent Sun.
day with the lattcr's parents, J.. c.
Gentry and family.
There will be no exhibition at
the Bridge school house as o
ported some time ago, however
there will be some exercises on
Friday evening, March 10. COM
mcncing at I 80.
There was n social given mt L.
F. Clark's last Saturday night and
a large crowd was present aud all
had n good time.
|. q. A. Bookseller aud family Wis.
tied his parents, Mr.. and Mrs. p.
II. Brookshicr Sunday.
Mr.. and Mrs. August Sticgman
visited Chas. Lichtc Sunday.
Henry Zweifcl Of near Minncola
visited Richard Kopp and family
Sunday.
l.. +. Clark and wife spent Sum
day with the lattcr's parents, s. 5.
McCarty and wife OF Prairie Fork.
Frank Norman Is going to work
for Mr.. John Lynch of near Calla-
way county this summer.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1905-03-10
Bear Creek.

Success 70 the new editor.
Spring fever 's the prevailing
sickness.
Geo. Cope was the first man In
In this vicinity 10 SOW oats. He
commenced last Wednesday. Sew.
eral others have sowcd oats since.
A few Of our young people at
tended the ball at High Till Nom
day night.
Harry Spencer went to 81. Louis
last Tuesday where he has cm-
ploymcnt for the aummer.
Miss Lizzie McClcnny Of High
Hill closed a very successful term
Of school at Wyatt school house
last Friday.
Mrs. M. Houkc IL recovering
from q sevcrc attack Of the grip.
Fred Leu. John Mason and Geo.
Cope went to st. Louis last week
on business.
Our mail man, Clarence Dcgar-
mo, drives a new team OF ponies;
ono he purchased from Mike Ryan
paying $50 aud the other from r.
Bcrgcrs paying $3.50.
Chas. Thcrmann closed q sue
ccssful term OF school at Van Ness
last Thursday.
Henry Rcisch recently sold one
OF his farms to Jno. Smith, the
consideration being $1,000.
John Lowry, jr., went to wclls-
vile Friday, where he will work
on n farm the following summer.
Miss Lizzie Fischer Of this vicin.
ity and Geo. Swatz of High Hill
united In marriage last Sun =
day at the home OF the brides
parents. We extend to them our
best congratulations.
The Walter Dix house occupied
by the widow Burgess burned
down at an early hour Tuesday
morning. Most OF the furnishings
OF two rooms were saved. There
vas no insurance.
Quite n good deal Of moving has
been done since our last report.
Jas. Black moved to a farm south
OF Montgomery City aud John
Robinson moved to the farm va.
Gated by him. and Geo. Fctc OF
near Gore moved to the farm a
Gated by Mr.. Robinson. Jno. Low.
~ moved to Geo. Young's farm
west Of Joncsburg and VIM. Jones
will, In the near future. occupy the
farm vacated by MI. Lowry. Lew
Pronit moved to his farm near
High Hin and Lewis Jackson OF
near High Hin will occupy the
farm vacated by Mr.. Prohtt.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1905-03-10

A perch welshlnf Ia pounds has
been captured at Birmingham. Eng
land. having tightly Iammcd In It's
throat the body Of u alfpound roach.
Tho head 81 the latter was ioo biz
for the pcrch's throat. and the result
was that both FISH were s~unocated.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1905-03-10

II you cannot eat, sleep Or work,
feel mean, o or ugly, take
HOLSTERS Rocky Mountain Tea
this month. A tonic for the sick.
There Is no remedy equal to It. IS
cents. Tea or Tablets. Ask your
druggist.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1905-03-10
READ THIS.

Ncosho, Mo-, July %, fool
have been for twenty years u
sufferer from kidney and bladder
trouble and have not been able to
do any work for several years.
The Texas Wonder, Halls Great
Discovery, has cured me, and now
! am able to do all my work.
Anyone In need of a kidney medi-
cine will find this TO be the cheap
est on earth, for | have tried them
all. w. A. DAVIS.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1905-03-10

To assuago thirst and euro ioycrish'
ness. apple tea is n notable sick
drink. II * made by silclng up raw
apples into n jug. hlling NJ the Jug
with boiling water. as In tea making
'hcn sweden to taste. When cold.
this apple tea will be found plcaslngly
tart and refr.fhing,
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1905-03-10
Our SubscrLpGion Rafcs.

The subscription price If tho
Montgomery TRIBUNE II one dol.
lar a year, In advance. We also
club the Tribune with tho Il. Louis
Globe Democrat twice n-w.ck)
for SLID n year for both papers,
Clubbing rates with any other pa
pcrs II desired. II
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1905-03-10

It will bring rich, red blood. firm
flesh and muscle. That's what
HOLSTERS Rocky Mountain Tea
will do. Taken this month, keeps
you well all summer. 81 cents,
Tea or Tablets. Ask your drug
gist.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1905-03-10

Subscribe for the TRIBUNE, IN
the news all the time.
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1905-03-10
L. A. THO N pSoN,

ATTORNEY Al LAW. prlcr Ia rnurs
"A HOUSE, Montgomery city. Mo
The Montgomery tribune. (Montgomery City, Mo.) 1892-1910, 1905-03-10

L. A. kiRN,
RuTrIHR AND PACKER and Dealer ~
- lee. Montgomery cts, No., Phone 4.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-10-20
SOUTH PARK LINE
TIGHTLY LOCKED
LITTLE HOPE OF AGREEMENT 7
BEING REACHED
CITY Attorneys Force Remains Firm
in Forbdding Council to Make
Any Terms With Railroad
Company

There is no rift in the dark cloud
that hangs over the city hall. The
situation on the South Park avenue
franchise is as tightly locked as ever
it was and when the council meets at
its special session this afternoon 1t is
believed that no solution will present
itself. There is every indication that
10 cars will run on this line until the
supreme court has decided the lnjunc-
ton case, which may be year.
In spite of the fact that the city
council will probably order the legal
department to begin proceedings for
forfeiture suit involving the entire
franchise, the city attorney Will as
stoutly maintain that the rights of
the city i'm the pending case before
the supreme court shall not be Jeopar-
dized. There is no action that the
council can take looking to compro-
mise that will not jeopardize these
rights
When moving an adjournment of the
Intellectual special meeting wednesday
afternoon, Councilman Smith stated
that he was sure some remedy would
be presented by this afternoon, where
by the service might be resumed, but
if such a remedy exists no hint of 1t
has reached the legal advisers of the
city.
No Action Agreed Upon
"If any plan of action has been
agreed on our department knows MOTH
ing of it," said Assistant City Attorney
Goudge last evening. "Our position is
the same as it has been from the first,
and while the council has full author
ity over the city's litigation no COM
promise will be effected with our ad-
vice. We firmly believe that If cars
are run over this railway on any sort
of an agreement, short of new and
COMPLETE franchise. we would labor
under great disadvantages in present.
ing our case 10 the supreme court. We
have won the case in the superior
court and the railway company would
turn cur own weapons against us If we
put them into their hands"
If Councilman Smith has any
remedy UP his sleeve he spent no time
in developing 1t yesterday. He was out
of the city all day on combined
business and pleasure trip. Mr.. Smith
is the one who, at Wednesdays meet
ing. practically threatened to go over
the head of the legal department and
enploy an outside attorney to give the
council the authority to patch up a
compromise. That anything Of this
nature vii be done was disclaimed by
other members of the council yester-
day.
The committee of residents and
property owners in the South Park
district which was appointed to LOOK
after the interests of that district, has
prepared what they term a statement
| OF fact to be presented to the city coun-
elf at it's special session this afternoon
This statement makes five points
That Mayor McAleer has admitted thai
the sale of the South Park avenue
| franchise would net the city but $3.50
that the mayor is fighting Henry d
| Huntington on personal grievance
Los Angeles herald., 1905-10-20

over 200 and is 3 feet 10 inches in
height. This is his third year at Cali
fornia. and he made his big 'C'' last
year against Stanford.
c. r. Zacharias, who will most like
ly get into the game as lett end be-
fore the finish, has been playing good
hall during the season. He will weigh
179 and is 6 feet l inch in height.
Goulcher will make good at half. He
weighs 1855 and is feet 10 inches in
height
The object of the coaches in sending
a large number of players is to give
the men a change from the hard drill
that they have been going through,
and give the possible candidates for
the varsity eleven as much practice
as possible before the big game with
Stanford.
There will be many California SYM
rathzers with the team, as keen in
terest is being taken in the Indian
game because of the fact that it is
understood that the Indians intend to
put up the game of their lives to even
up things of days gone by
Coach Knibbs of California is re-
ticent in regard to the outcome of the
game, but says that the team will give
good account of itself on the day of
the game.
The team members are in god health
and spirits and expect to go to Los
Angeles to fight a hard game, but to
come out with the big end of the
score.