The semi-weekly messenger. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1897-1908, 1905-05-16
hit 1T SOFT SNAP PREACHERS
The Rips Says They are Generally
Found in Large Cities.
They Keep an Ear to the Ground Ia
Hear n Call Where More Dough-
Is OHercd-When They Can Hear
tie Lord Call and When They Cam
not.

Now il there is anything on earth
some blaek-gowned. sanctimenious six
for a quarter preacher, who is eternal
ly log-roIling and scheming with some
church official who is higher up the
ladder of churchdom than himself, and
e~Ddeavoring 10 land "a soft snap job
in some city, where he will only have
to preach about twice a week, and pray
a short little prayer on Wednesday
night. But we have them in very large
Cities, and we have a good number Of
them i'm smaller towns, who are laying
the wires to get into big cities, where
they can loaf around six days in tbs
week. and visit the millionaires and
preach forty minutes On Sunday, and
draw a salary of from three thousand
TO five thousand dollars per year.
After you let one of these "~eye-glass
reprobates get his claws on a city job,
you can just bet your life that he i
not going to turn it loose to 90 out to
SclhC poSl Il appointment III lbC
country, it matters not how loud tho
Lord may calm fact, they would per-
nit the Lord to use a meeaphone, and
then pretend that they never heard
him. rather than part with their city
sOft-snap.
All congregations have these soft
snap preachers in them, but we do not
say that all city preachers are of this
class, but we do say that the majority
Of them that rant around in some gold
trimmed pulpits, are of this class, and
have no more influence for good than
the braying of a jackall would have Oh
the conscience of a b~illy-goat.
They will scheme around and switch
from Presiding Elder to pastor. or from
some other official position in the
church. which pays a good fat salary,
but you Will never find one of their
asking to be transferred to some cOun-
try charge, unless there is more coin in
the job than there is in the one they
hold in the city, but if there is more
dough attached to the job in the coun-
try or some other city thar there is in
the job they possess, you will OOn see
them with their ear to the ground, lis
tening for the Lord to call them, and
about the next sabbath after they have
been offered a better paying job than
they hold. they will moisten their eyes
with a little saliva or cut up a bushel
Or two of onions before they go to
church, in order to cry, and at the end
of the service they will inform their
congregation, that the Lord has called
them to a new field when the fact of
the matter is, that the Lord would not
know them if he was to meet them in
broad daylight, as he never had an in
PRODUCTION to them.
You take the preachers of today; we
mean big city preachers, who preach to
the ~millionaires, and you will find them
just IS dead bent ard hetI bent on
money as the cOmmOnest barkeeper on
caith. as these preachers, as we'll as
the G~arkeerorS. run their bnSine+5 for
revenue only"
Our modern ',!0!lGr-clasi1g' big city
PREACHERS can put their ear to the
ground aid hear the Lord call them
clear across inc continent. bnt you
must bear in mind that they arr as
deaf as beetles until the call has been
reduced to writing, with Il salary stip-
uiation i'm the contract. but as soon as
that is all arranged. they can hear a
| Whisper from the Lord during a cy-
clone, but If there IS 80 increase in the
salary, o- something or other, which
which make it to their interest to mOve,
these S~Oft-snap preachers will put on
that pious. sanctimOnious. seven dollar
and a half look, and will declare to
their congregation that they could not
bear to leave them, and that they think
they can do the most good where they
are"
We have noticed for a long time that
you hardly ever see any religion in u
large cities, or at least you can't notice
it; and we would not give a continen-
tai cuss for a religion you couldn't tell
a fellow had, for if we are going TO
have something. we don't want to have
somebody tell us that we have got IT,
before we know we have GOT it, but our
soft-snap city preachers, should they
get a strange dose of religion would call
in every doctor in the neighborhood To
learn what was the matter with them,
as a good old-fashioned dose of old
time religion would scare them out Of
their pants.
The funny thing with our modern
city Christians is, that you can't tell
them by their actions from the
siest kind of a sinner. as they viii
drink IA little, gamble a little. cuss a
little. and swindle their great-grand-
mother: but still our soft-snap preach
ers will cater to this class and give the
world to understand that this herd OF
scoundrels are on their 20 to glory,
when, if the devil thought there was
any change Of any Of the mdying. hc
would sit up three weeks without a
minutes sleep. to get his clutches on
them.
Our modern soft-snap preachers new
er preach a hallelujah, r~ip-roaring, aii
wool and a yard wide religion. and If
some old country brother OIL sister
would happen TO drop into Of their
churches and would get a little warm
under the collar. and would shout a lit