New-York tribune., 1905-01-07
NO DIVORCE PROBLEM.
Cause of Modern Unrest Lies in
Unsuitable Marriages.

There IS 10 divorce problem Marriage is the
p-oblen-divosce simply means that you have given
T. up" declared Mrs Gustav L Becker. IN the
course OF e paper on The Unitarian Attitude
Toward the Social Problems OF the Day" before
the New-York League OF Unitarian Women, yes
terday. n the Leaox Avenue Unitarian Church
AI-s Becker had begun by narrowing her topic
6oEz 70 The social problems OF the day as they
Ersct TIE IN the home. the home being the
centre OF the social system
'En@ae IS not pots and pans. but most OF pile
- pots Eno pans and stand On them 10 over
lnto the hons IDEAL she said. After the develop
znsr1 of individuality and the development OF So
cal cDnsaouzness. the Of mutual relation,
as Two cf the great purposes OF education, Mrs.
Becker went OF 70 how essential the latter was
sr ths hone and n the marriage relation.
Unless We have this sense OF mutual relation
shs rno6s-n marriage is anomalous condition
out o. touch with the times For civilization de-
rnsnds the highest development OF individuality:
marriage calls cor the merging Of lndividualties;
and unless this sense OF common cause merEes
thezr- between the two opposing forces the mar
rage dies"
Then Hrs. Becker turned 70 another domestic
problem, arising from somewhat the same conflict
a. TIE marriage problem. but that does not get
INTO the newspapers often-that Is the relation
between the mother and the grown-up unmarried
daughter living at home. Formerly the matter was
simple: worRn's vocation vas the manage
nent q s home When the daughter was comna
tent and ole enough she left her state Of puplaEe
and oeDendencs al home 70 take her place in The
world al the head OF her husbands house
Il sne dc not marry she remained al home in
state of puplage and dependence with the differ
ehoe that es she had practically no future ber
pupiiage had e sense OF futHty and failure that
maze her scoept wiki ueekness the task Of filing
I'D The family gaps.
But he modern girl knows that she Is born 10 z
pace II ne world, and that marriage IS an inhu-
ence UPON her individuality. not her charter 10
-lo4'loIaty Itself The pressure is OF her choice
eAe IS Tree 70 await the right man. and meantime
~ eie u0e sense OF the word she has her own life
!" 4eao- The mother IS the executive head Of the
-Ae ne responsibilities Of II give her sense Of
hes Own value: II the girl lives at home and has
- --e WORK OF her own she is not apt 10 find her
- Pect satisfied by what they call IN the cOun-
-o-loHlng round and doing chores
her 49, 80 see mat the daughter needs TO define
s-6-ygln3 So ~ place il the home, have her own re-
re Ee. as loved And e che does not, there comes
~ IN sogeneDt they called IN England the revolt
- ne Iae Gughters.' where the daughters went out
because tey See5e5 ey tbe osor na Jhe in9aey but
0sn VI problen BY realizing her own possibilities
home for purely domestic life Then either the
49, ssgePohslolties OF the house must be divided, or
hsE value 70 herself 1t is hard for the mother
e!ong u any one else. she belongs TO herself; and
2 = 81 ihls point that the wise and loving mother
psI.Lse wOman's club came IN for some OF Mrs.
hecEers cleverest comments.
hle II K an excellent means OF getting light
ol social problems" she asserted the woman s
a. has become something OF q problem in itself
cup has the right 10 exist only II IL has q
ssssSilte purpose that cannot be reached by indi-
.sULel e1ort There IS no especial need for club
:, - give women a chance 70 read one another ex-
o-scls rom some encyclopedia, cr1ticiSe one an
Osshers clothes and run for Office. Yet you know
..I-n 80 a smile ran around the large audience
n,hen such club has internal dissensions as II
-ele!ly does have. there IS surely need for the
ioeang members 10 form another equally purpose
1 society 20 travel the sans vague path under a
. ~ set Of officers.
- Anc, On the other hand. il follows that I have
- - rght 20 Join club unless understand and
-ss.lpatntze with fts purposes. Clubwonlen are as
-5-S 5-.l bound 70 live up 20 fheir constitution as
T.-.eh members are 70 live up 70 their creed II
.S-- Tor any other reason than desire 70 unite
- -. common cause-if Join 20 improve my social
tess!-on or because ] intend 10 be the board
-ctors-l an exercising certain spiritual dis
S3...ssly that VIII work against my own growth
-. c!uD VIII hold tts right place in the commit
80 ano It's own members their right places in
ne c-o only II they nave deAniteness Of purpose