The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1905-04-06
MEMS COLUMN
Men ought to know that:

"A woman can tell 1uo CoAoA Va
her baby's hair and whether 1t Is
going to be curly or not before 1t mas
any.
Old maids like chimneys that
smoke because it makes them think
there is a man in the house.
The woman that can make her
husband believe that he is a great
deal smarter than she is never mas
any trouble getting an Easter bonnet
The reason why there is SO many
clinging women is because men 50
like to be chung to.
No man ever went back on girl
because she came out of the kitchen
with a patch of flour on her nose
when he called on her Unexpectedly.
If law we're passed compelling
women to wear sunbonnets on Sunday
there would be no trouble ABOUT
getting them to remove their head
covering in church.
"A greater quantity can be con-
tanned in less science to the contrary,
a woman can put a number five loot
in number three shoe.
"A girl would much rather her
lover would lie than to say she is not
good looking.
"A woman with pair OF twins
thinks every other woman envles her.
Friday is a very unlucky day to
get married on. So is Sunday, Mon
day, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday
and Saturday for that matter.
When the man dies who keeps
his religion in his wife's name the
devil will give him the merry ha, ha.
When a girl is sixteen she wants
a nobleman for husband; when she
is twenty-six any kind Of a man will
satisfy her.
The school boy who can lick any
and every other boy in his room is
the one little girls dOte on.
Girls are all free traders yet they
all believe in protection.
1t is quite correct to speak of a
baby as cit"
"A girl likes a horseless carriage
but she won't stand for squeezeless
waltz.
"A woman does not love with her
intellect but with her heart.
"A woman's conclusions are not
formed on judgement but on intui-
ton.
The bride of day always thinks
her husband god.
The only time man can dictate
to woman is when she is his stem
ographer.
There ought to be law prohibit
ing cutting the strings of tongue tied
babies when they are girls.
"A woman would much rather her
new carpet would fade than to roll
down the curtains so it could not be
seen from the street.
"A woman never thinks another
woman's baby is real cute after she
has one of her own.
One reason why so many girls
wish they were boys is because then
they wouldn't have any clothes that
fasten at the back.
You can always tell the way a
mother disciplines her little daughter
by the way the girl plays with her
doll.
When a woman has a new bonnet
she thinks the Lord don't quite under
stand how to run the world if it rains
on Easter Sunday.
uOu LdNluS WQlSk0rS
on their faces if they do not remain
there permanently.
You can tell just how far young
mans courtship has progressed by
the kind of horse he hires to take
his girl out riding.
On wedding tours it is never the
bride that worries for fear the people
will take them for newly married
couple.
Every young man ought to know
that it is a good plan to keep away
from his girl part of the time so she
can think about him.
No man would ever gamble if he
thought he would lose more than half
the time.
The woman that don't pick out
the biggest bill in her purse to pay
her street car fare with hasn't been
born yet.