New-York tribune., 1905-06-18

o.,.. mo, &c lust naturally in hurry
whether he has anything to do or not. ne ""
| rush down State-st- though nliiioh
| black men, were chasing him. perhaps he ~
! bun7p into somebody with Deal Vhey spe-t
Deal with big D in Chicago anu iiiaN0
n,illion Even the women tear about tie 81
from store to store always haunted py 'he Ae.
that they viii overlook some bargain anu -'--'
to save 800 cents.
Even in writing this, one discovers lhsA' o
has caught the Chicago spirit In the foregoing
naragraph one will find million creeping in twice
where IL does not belong, and who ever hearu OIL
@ woman saving 999 cents single bargain
Yet that's the way they put it In Chicago
"Ciphers are cheap. put them on!" seems 10 Dc
the watchword. If man draws salary u
81 900 a year he will confess to $1,000 without
turning an eyelash. 1t works out all rlght, too'
for he is consistent. His $50 fat costs him s<oo
His cook gets 500 month. His wife's dresses
cost him $500 a year. He saves So,ooo-all 'lls
out of less than 500 month, and the Joy OF II
sl1 IS that he does not know he is exaggerating.
Another Illustration in point is the way liie
Chicago newspapers told about the Westoouno
trin of the Pennsylvania Special last Sunday.
The fastest mile made on the run was covered
IN forty-four seconds, and it was plenty Tast
enough for those on the train, including. OF
course The Tribune correspondent. 1t was not
fast enough. however, for Chicagoans' and oy
the time the record had rolled through the
presses it appeared that the train had maze a
mile in % 3-5 seconds-one should not overlook
the touch of accuracy which is given by the
fraction 3-5.
There is a speed limit of eight miles an hour
in Chicago for automobiles. yet the average
nachine-and there are thousands OF then1-ruh
like streaks of creased lightning. Twice within
ba;r, NTH q we
big touring cars have into the Chicago River
because they were going so fast that the drivers
could not stop for little thing like an open
drawbridge Yet the courts are not over
burdened with the cases Of speeding autono-
bilists. and An arrest for such a cause would be
looked upon in the light Of persecution.
Speaking of automobiles, Chicago has worked
out a revised edition of the skunk joke.
Two of the odorous little animals are at the
roadside when a gasolene car speeds by.
Sniff! Sniff! Sniff!
The New-York joke of the same class differs
only In the remark of the skunks There is the
sniff But the New-York skunks ask:
What's the use of living"
There one has a striking example Of the diP
ference, in spirit, between sprawling Chicago
and the tight little isle'' Of Manhattan. When
Chicago finds something better than she has
satisfied and allwise with its sun and moon
rising in Brooklyn and setting in Jersey City.
lies hack and asks, What's the user
There is Chicago joke that has been
rent since Mayor Dunno OF municipal owner
ship and thirteen children fame, took office, but
which must soon be relegated to the bearded
| class. It runs:
What is the difference between the Mayor
| and the postoffice?"
The Mayor is Dunno and the postoffice is
not"
They are moving into the postoff1ce building
now, and in g month or two 1t will be open for
business.
An Englishulan who recently visited Chicago
declared that the postofhce was the only ancient
building Chicago had. It has been more than
decade in building. Remembering, however his
own Hall of Records and Public Library, the
New Yorker Is silent
Visitors who have not been here since the
Worlds Fair always declaim on what a shame
1t was that the beautiful buildings were sold to
q wreckng company for a song and DESTROYED
Then. perhaps, they taken for an automobile
trip through Jackson Park and come across the
Field Museum of Art, the only large build
ing Of the Columbian group which was permitted