Newport daily independent., 1905-08-07
EGG MARKET LOOSENED.
And the Groceryman's Man Made the
 Fact PreteIt for Loosentng Ills Tongue.

"Ain't you glad that eggs Is down again. Evelna?" asked the grocery man of the pretty cook. according to he Chicago Daily News.
 Why should I be glad?" asked the cook.
 Well, that's so. You don't have to pay for 'em, do you?" said the grocery man. "It don't make no difference to you. O course, but it's been tough Ou the rest of us I've been gShungry all winter, but the lady who keeps the house where board didn't have chick ems. so I've been sort of up against it. This last week or two since the market loosened shes been a mskln' up for lost time feel as If I was sproutin' pin feathers I've had hard-boiled eggs, poached eggs, scrambled sggs, soft boiled eggs, egg custard, egg omslets, friend esSS. egg salad. ham and eggs, egg sauce, egg on toast, egg lemonade and eggs every other old way. The other evenin I burnt my fingers pullin on hot lamp chimney au' they gave me white of egg shampoo on it just as free as water. 1 had a egg shampoo at the barber shop on Sunday morning Hon est. I'm ashamed to look hen in the face"
 "I sh'd think you would be. said the pretty cook.
 q am, that's straight. I've been raised honest, an the boss knows it. He'll let me sell goods in the store any time amt deliverin' an take the money for em. don't care if he does have cash regis ter au good eyesight-it's sAth1ln to have man trust you. All the same, when I've been openin' up case of eggs i've been tempted many time this win- ter to swipe one or two an trust to mak- in my getaway afore they was missed
 If I'd a known that I'd have given you a chance" said the pretty cook. An l wouldn't have applied for no ex- try edition papers to have you brought back" she added. I'd a thought 1t cheap at a egg or two"
 You're toshin'," said the groceryman, If jumped this town you'd spend all your wages advertisin for me in the per s'nal columns-'Johnny. It was hor- rible mistake Come back. Evelina
 Don't you fool yourself" said the pretty cook. Are these you've brought me fresh?"
 "Strickly fresh" but not guaranteed strickly fresh, replied the groceryman. B t what are you changin' the conver- sation for? You cant make me believe you wouldn't feel bad If you didn't see me any more"
 q know l can't" retorted the pretty cook. That's the trouble"
 You want to take warnin' by what I've said about the eggs" said the groceryman "I knew a feller wunst who had a girl that just nachully thought the world of him. but she wus jest nachully shy an shrinkin', like you are, Evelina, an she didn't let on she cared a dern whether he come around to see her or not. An he hung around hankerin' for kind word an sweet smile, jest like I-hankered for them eggs when the guaranteed was 45 a dozen. An finally, Jest when he was givin up hope, she loosened up-1ust like the egg mArket-an he got sweet smiles an kind words served up to him In every style. We'll. he go so many he shuddered every time hen cackled."
 "Eggs?" said the cook
 Never mind" said the groceryman, as he reached for his basket You're next, all right, If am mixed Farewell naughty beauty, but remember, time will come"
 "It's come now" said the cook Time you travelled. Pass on"