The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-01-29
Whinls Of the ldler
5W1MMEN FOLKS AND HOUsE-BUILl.lD:'EE:lR'SS'2

y
strokes cost about ninety dollars an inch
and thatsgif you ever take snuff while
looking at tho plans and specifications
each sneeZe will cost you an even huns
3dred. x And what Is more, the contractor.
can nrtfully show you where each sneeze
actually costs him s99. 90 cents. s.i7 Great
dodgers, are these contractors, anyhow.
One can make more different kinds OF
fool Of ones self in building q house
than in any other way on earth, and II
one s Il consort i.s@alding sands abetting IN
the stultifcatlona process, t@thent look out
for asslninity In its most malignant form.
Even suppoaing you get the four walls
up and the roof OH without landing in
the Police Court as a Wife, beater, that
doesn't mean that you and your self
assertive 5flfty-hundredths are leading q
turtle-d dove existence Quite the con-
ltrary. Ss 81
Women, gentle. yielding women, doesn't
care much & about the outside OF the
house anyhow. It's the "insldes'' she's
after. and although she may know no
moro about mechanics and architecture
than Jack rabbit. she gets "notiony"
from the very start and grovel .lougfl
you may, you cannot bulge her. First
and foremost there are two things she's
dead sure to clamor for and }havc--tl
great big hallway and plenty OF little
closets. She's willing to sacrifice all
downstairs for the hallway and all up
stairs for the closets. And IL any
room is left, after these two essentials
have been, provided for. she wants this
precious reslduum built with special
reference to some particular bit Of fur
niture OF hers, even though the furniture
in question Is worth at Its highest only
three or four dollars. And supposing
she gets the spacious hall, multitudnous
closets and rooms designed especially for
her petted antiques. she Will next clamor
| for that dearcsts OF oil feminine posses
| sons- a packing room or rather many
| packing rooms, which are to be used rs
a hospital for all the injured, MANNED
disabled. and superannuated articles In
the house except her husband. \.
In our frenzed cropping efforts to get
packing rooms and closets. wo sew
eral times lost tho backstairs on our
blue print and twice, II | mistake not,
we also cut of the front stairs, But
that didn't worry the COMMANDMENT
Chief any more than II we had been
cliff dwellers She said 1t was the con-
tractors business toefnd place to put
tho steps and to straighten out the va Z.
rlous kinks. And BIO It said. the worthy
man has measured up to the emergency.
But he now rides In an automobile at
my expense and wouldn't hesitate to
throw gold nuggets at his neighbours
hens to drive them out OF his garden.
The cunning worker In bricks and
mortar, says the Queen Bee. has got
some splcndidly practical Ideas And
so she has. She has been practical
enough to supply feed for, his wifo and
interesting family o. nine little boys
for thirteen years AZ II
II you want TO see the sweet Christian
! character Of builder, just say extras"
\ to him--Just tell him you want this door
swung on the outside nstead Of on the
inside. as originally provided. or d new
window cut on tbs dark slide Of tho
house. Will he wiring his hands and
\ say, alas, You demand impossibitles?
II Not bit OF It., He viii be as sunshiny
as June day and the extra work, dona
almost before you suggest II, will cost
you at tho rate OF $40 for each extra
brick and $40 for each additional nail II
II weren't for thd extras" contractors
would never bn blllippairAs; they would
have TO drag along their weary wretchcd
lives as mere humble millionaires.
Now don't think this Is writ sarcas-
tick or that want any builder to &c
and bury his head with shame In his
sandpile after seeing these words None
knows better than l@tNat a contractor
earns every penny he mtAxes and hun.
dred per cent.smora besides, to say moth,
ing OF having mighty good chance
/ for cclestaiherown For by the time
ne gets the first jolsts laid the futur,
mistress OF the house Is on the premises
roosting daily on the scannlngs and boss
/, Ing every stroke that's made. And III,
critter isn't merely satisfied with watch
ing and buldozing, She must "knov
I ! tho reason Why'--musl have an explain
alton for every plank that's laid. Lonl
before the stairs are set, she's sklnnini
up ladders like the trapeze expert ii
a circus or terrorizing the plastercr
4 into swallowing whole handouts Of III
nails they carry in their mouths.
\ She's upstairs, downstairs, In th
lady'g chamber Ill Ia the same breath