davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08

Eli don't understand why my wife
his so hinfernal jealous remarked
Captain Hill, of the schooner Whydah,
to his mate, who was busily putting
patch on the seat of a pair of dung
aree trousers, "she thinks every wom-
an who drops her heyes on my bloom
in face falls dead in love with me-.
THAT shows the foolishneSs of wom-
en-" replied the mate, f1ourishing his
needle and speaking in an argumenta-
tive tone, anybody with eyes could
see no woman's goin' to fall in love
with you
Hid ave you to understand, Mr..
Jenkins" began the skipper wrath
fully, but his emotions choked him
and fastening on deck he said some
words over the side which caused the
cook, who had been attending Saliva
ton Army meetings to groan in his
spirit.
The schooner was to sail that even
ing from Shoreham for London and
the skipper went home to bid his wife
farewell.
When he came down to the quay he
was carrying, with visible effort, a
large portmanteau, while a boy fol-
lowed with another. Behind the pro-
cession sta1ked a tall. angular woman
ct didn't know Mrs. Hill was going
with u.s." exclaimed the mate to the
skipper, while Mrs. Hill exchanged
some vigorous remarks with the boy
concerning the dropping of the port
manteau he was carrying.
Eli didn't know it myself until a
'alf hour ago." replied the captain,
with intense gloom.
The mate looked at Mrs. Hill with
visible perturbation, then his face
frightened and he helped that lady
aboard with Difference.
Mrs. Hill declined going into the
cabin, preferring to witness the get
ting of the vessel under way.
AS the skipper stood on the break
of the poop the mate made a slight
motion of his hand inviting him far
Their forward, and when the two were
out of earshot of Mrs. Hill the mate
said in a whisper:
There's a Teddy aboard"
Teddy" exclaimed the captain,
what sort of leddy?''
.'The way of it's this said the
mate, speaking very fast as if he
didn't want any gap left for an inter
ruption, "old Captain Tomlinso
brought his daughter around with him
from Lunnon. She was to go back
with i'm when he sailed at noon to-
day. but the cranky old cuss got full
o. spirits and sailed away without her.
The poor girl had no money to go
back by railroad and no friends in
Shoreham, SO she asked me if she
couldn't go back on this hooker. I felt
SO bad about her trouble that 1 said
she could. 1 told her to get into my
cuddy and I'd fix it all right with you. -
The skipper stared at the mate as
If he was looking at a ghost.
.'Tomlinson," he gasped, "Tomlin-
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08

"Then tell him to open It: you are
master of the ship
George" said the skipper, feebIy,
"hopen that there door,"
Mr.. Jenkins, with an air of des-
peration, unlocked the door and open
ed it.
Mrs. Hill, quivering with righteous
scorn, looked upon the bold-faced girl
or rather she looked upon a burly
man lying in the mates bunk=an ILL
dressed man with two days growth
of bristles on his chin. He stared
sheepishly at his observers and said
nothing
Who's that?" calculated the skip
per, turning to the mate.
Mr.. Jenkins closed the door and led
the captain on deck.
Hes a pore fellow" said he, who's
in trouble with the per1ice on account
of desertin' from a ship. 1 agreed to
smuggle him to Lunnon and, as l was
afraid for the crew to see him, hid
him in my cuddy. l thought l could
get him to Lunnon without your know
in it,
What made you say it was a led.
dy?'' demanded the skipper.
"3Cause l knew then with Mrs. Hill
aboard you'd dare not run the risk O.
putin him ashore"
The unshaved man had a passage
to London, but when the schooner was
at the wharf the skipper addressed
the mate.
George said he. 'is old Captain
Tomlinson married?''
Nav answered Mr.. Jenkins, 1--WE
known him for years. He's not mar
ried.''
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08
THEN THE LAWYER SAW.
CoIored Witness Left No Doubt as to
His Meaninn,


Down in Mobile there is darky, a
carpenter by trade, who, according to
Mr.. John Sharp Williams, has a local
reputation for quickness at repartee.
1t appears that not many months ago
Bolts, for that is the darky's name,
was subpOenaed as a witness in a
case tried in one of the justice courts
in Mobile. Although the attorney who
took Bolts in hand for cross-examina-
ton was needlessly severe in his treat
ment of the colored carpenter, the lat
ter exhibited admirable patience and
self-control. The two got along fair
ly well till the witness was asked as
to his occupation
Use a carpenter, sah?'' said Bolts.
What kind of a carpenter?" asked
the attorney.
''Dey calls me a jack-leg carpenter
sah."
"Jack-leg carpenteri" sharply reiter-
ated the lawyer. What is a jack-leg
carpenter"
what we cullud folks calls a carpen-
ter who amt fust-class carpenter.
81 fail to understand you,'' said the
attorney, more sharply than before
You'll have to be more exact. What
are we to understand by a jack-leg
carpenter?"
well, sab, mebbe it might be ex
planned better by sayin' dat de diff
f'rence is just about de same as be
tween you and a fust-class lawyer
responded Bolts with a broad grim
New York Times.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08
Incide mt in Balzac' Life

In a recent volume upon ASPECTS of
Balzac," says the Philadelphia Record,
appeared this characteristic anecdOte:
"On one young English woman, at any
rate, Balzac himself made a strong
if maybe a temporary-impress &C
cording to his friend Gozlan, as re-
corded in the entertaining 'Balzac on
Pantouf1es.' Gozlan met the novelist
one afternoon in the bOulevardS, hun
cry for dejeuner. Balzac took him
into an English confectioner's in the
Rue Royale. Having ordered some
macaroni pates, he laid down on the
table some volumes he was carrying.
DO you know what that book is?' he
asked GoZlan. No, my dear Balzac!
Hearing Balzac's name, the English
girl behind the counter started as if
fascinated by it. Balzac did not no.
tice her. 1T is pathfinder" of Feni-
more Cooper And he poured out an
enthusiastic appreciation of the Amer
lean novelist, forgetting his hunger,
forgetting where he was and every
thing but his subject. But you are
not eating, said Gozlan. True re-
piled Balzac; and in three or four
gargantuan mouthfuls, eating, laugh
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08
Buffalo Hunt in Australia

In the wilds of northern Australia
are herds of buffalo which are hunted
and killed in great numbers, as were
the bison on the American plains
third of century ago. An Australian
hunter says: only on one occasion
did we have a buffalo turn on u.s. but
before he came too close bullet re-
minded him of an engagement else
where. The hunters and the natives
with them have at times experienced
some bad falls with the buffalo, and
in several instances they have been
gored Some miraculous escapes have
occurred When the hunters have
been down and the bes/ls have been
trying to get at them with their horns,
they have crept out. and catching hold
of the horns, have vaulted over the
backs of the animals and escaped.
The possibility of this can be realized
when one understands the size of
some of the horns. I have a pair just
six feet across, and have seen a pair
measure nine feet.
Zone Of the shooters. Paddy Cahill.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08
Sunset on Popocatapeti.

There is almost no twilight in Mexi-
CO. You watch the sun, a blazing
orb, descending with growing swift
ness and wreathed in a veil of fire,
toward the horizon, writes Lee Wood
ward Zeigler in Recreation. Sudden
ly it begins to drop behind the distant
mountains and the shadows advance
across the plain, swallowing up the
landscape in mellow gloom. The
shadow draws near and nearer-en-
velopes the town. Behind you the
sky is still lit up with rosy beams. A
line of shadow creeps swiftly up the
rugged sides of old Popocatapetl, OBJ
securing completely the base of the
mountain as it advances. Up, up the
snow-capped crest, deepening in tint,
until at last it hangs like a great opal
against the darkening sky. A mo-
ment it remains SO, glowing and quiv-
ering as if on f1re-grows smaller and
is gone. Night has come!
Through the dusky silence you
seek your hotel, passing on the road
side silent figures fagot-laden. "Adios,
senior" Their soft-voiced greeting
falls upon your ear like a benediction.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08

had spiendidly trained horse which
he used in his hunting; in fact, the
horse pretty well did the work. AS
soon as a mob of buffalo were sighted
the horse. as a matter of course, gal
loped alongside while his master at
tended TO his particular part of the
game Forty-five in one day is,
think, sufficient proof that rider and
horse understood the business thor
oughly. When the shooting for the
day was finished the horse of it's own
accord would proceed to each carcass
and stand there until the skinning ope-
rations were finished.
Zone day the master of the craft
trading between the buffalo shooters
and Darwin went with the hunters to
have a look at the fun. So surprised
was he at the performance of the
horse that he said, Say, Paddy, -hy
don't you give the horse a knife and
let him skin the beasts?' Another &C
complishment of the horse was the
manner in which he would at a word
from his master chase Objectionable
natives out Of the camp"
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08

Certainly; she's promised to keep
as still as mouse
When the Whydah pointed her nose
up channel Mrs. Hill had her luggage
carried below and followed it. The
skipper kept casting alarmed looks at
the mates cuddy, but Mrs. Hill was
busy arranging the captains room and
paid no heed to the cabin.
At supper, after Mrs. Hill had fin
ished and gone on deck, the skipper
encountered the mate on his way to
the cuddy with an enormous pile of
victualS on a plate.
''She must be a 'earty young Teddy
to eat hall that" he remarked, with
an astonished glance at the plate.
'She's one of these hearty English
girls you read Of" replied the mate,
cheerfully.
Mrs. Hill retired early, but the skip
per fingered on deck. His perturbed
mind was soothed by the peace of the
night. AS he passed the sky-light he
looked down and beheld the mate. car
rying a full glass of spirits to the
cuddy.
Captain Hill rubbed his head.
whats the women of Hengland
a-comin' to-" he muttered, that was a
Dram ZOE coal StOk0r-
The next morning Mrs Hill an
nounced at the breakfast table that
she intended giving the captains
cuddy complete renovation and &C.
cordingly the cook carried down pals
of water and several swabs. This
work was finished in short order, and
then she turned to Mr.. Jenkins with
| a smile. I'm going to clean up your
r-r,f tor cI =
needs it,
skipper.
I've jest had my cuddy cleaned
| he stammered, "the cook cleaned it
while we were at Shoreham.''
| why didn't he clean the captains,
| too?" asked Mrs. Hill.
| The mate thought for a moment
and would doubtless have admirably
explained the omission of the cap
tain's cuddy from the renovation, but
before he could open his lips a sneeze
| sounded from the closed cuddy
Somebody's in there" exclaimed
Mrs. Hill, looking with a stony eye
at the wretched skipper.
That gentleman's lips were too dry
to articulate. but the mate said:
1T was the cook wot sneezed. He's
an awful cold.''
THE person who sneezed is in this
room" said Mrs. Hill, shortly, "whe
is it?"
The mate and skipper looked al
each other in affrighted silence
who's in there, Henry?'' demanded
Mrs. Hill, with rising infection O
voice
Nobody spoke.
Henry" said Mrs. Hill, calmly
"open that door,
Hits the mates ROOM" murmure,
the sEipr~-
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08

the word to stay in the cuddy till we
gets to Lunnon- Well be there by
noon tomorrow at the latest and
after your wife leaves she can go. I'll
smuggle some grub into her.
'Hit'H never do, George" said the
skipper, nervously, "she must go
hashOre."
why" expostulated the mate, it'd
never do for her to go now. If Mrs.
Hill was to see us a-putting gal
ashore jest as the vessel was sailin'
she ID think all kinds O. things and 1
wouldn't blame her.
Are you sure you can keep her in
the cuddy?" asked the skipper.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08
JAP SOLDIERS NOT so FINE.
They Are Careless About Marching
and Appearance.


Splendid as it is, the Japanese army
is a haphazard affair from spectacu-
lar standpoint, writes Eleanor Frank
lin in Leslie's Weekly. l believe they
are supposed to be the finest soldiers
on earth, these little men, but they
seem to care nothing at all about how
they look. There is no finer sight to
be seen than a perfectly uniformed
and perfectly trained regiment OF
marching soldiers. AS one man they
move to the sound of five or drum, and
the measured swing of their bodies in
narrowing perspective holds one fas-
cinated, hypnotized, as by the undu-
lations of the body of a gigantic
dragon Not so Japanese regiment
True. they have a drum corps every
few yards. but no two fifers ever play
the same tune in the same time, and II
they did it would have no effect upon
the soldiers, who do not seem to rec
ognize rhythm, and are not troubled
the least bit in the world about keep
ing STEP" Shuffie-shuffie! Kittle-cat-
tie could mark better time than they,
and l am possessed by constant de-
sire to shout ..Left-right! left-right!
to them as they go jogging along In
stead of the even undulations as of
the waves of the sea, in the motion OF
the marching of Japanese regiment
there is a choppiness as of troubled
waters after a severe gale when the
wind has been blowing every which
way at once
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08

ing and praising Cooper at the same
time, while he walked up and down
the shop, he gobbled up four macaroni
pates, to the immense establishment
of the girl, who was amazed that
man who, as she had thought, would
feed upon flowers, air and perfumes,
should eat so greedily- What do l
owe you, mademoiselle?' said Balzac,
at length satisfied. Nothing, Mon
sieur Balzac,' answered the girl, in a
tone which admitted no contradiction.
Balzac looked at his friend. hardly
knowing how to reply to this delicate
attention. And then, after a moments
pause, he presented her with Cooper's
romance, saying: I have never so
much regretted, mademoiselle, that
am not the author of it,
1--WE do not know whether Balzac
ever saw the girl again. He was not
of the nature of Sterne- This incident
reminds one of the buffet scene in the
first act of 'Cyrano de Bergerac.' with
this one immense difference, that Cy-
rano refused to accept more than
grape and macaroon, while Balzac-
intending to pay, however-had eaten
his FILL
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08
Verse.

To talk with the wild brook of all the
long ago;
To whisper the wood wind of things we
used to know
When we We're old companions, before
my heart knew woe.
To walk with the morning and watch its
rose unfold.
To browse with the noontide, luIled on its
heart of gold
To lie with the nighttime and dream
the dreams of old.
To tell to the old trees, and to each list
ening leaf.
The longing, the yearning, as in my boy
hood brief,
The old hope, the old love, would ease my
heart of grief
The old lane. the old gate, the old house
by the tree,
The wild wood, the wild brook-they viii
not let be;
In boyhood 1 knew them. and still they
call to me.
Madison Cawein. in the Criterion
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08
A LANGUAGE Lesson.

Beautiful is an adjective applied
chiefly to brides, heroines of novels
and ladies in distress, says the St
Louis Post-Dispatch- The word is
derived from the French word
.beaut," meaning a corker, peach,
Jallapaloosa- 1t is employed princi-
pally by society editors. novelists,
newspaper reporters and poets, and
holds its age and shape well in spite
of constant activity and overwOrk-
The only novelist who never used the
word was Rhoda Broughton. Her
heroine Belinda was green-eyed, freck-
led and cantankerous, and is the only
Inbeautiful heroine 'on record, just as
the Count in Wi1kie Collins The
Woman in White" is the only fat vii
lain The only poet who has never
used it is Swinburns- He always COM
>pares his heroines to serpents, they
are 30 wise and sinuous- The society
editor or newspaper reporter who has
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08
DISMAL SWAMP AS 1T is.
Is Sunshiny Place, with Pure Air and
Wholesome Water.

Is Sunshiny Place, with Pure Air and
Wholesome Water.
1.-THE Dismal swamp is by no means
SO dismal as it has been painted"
said John A. James of Richmond to
the Milwaukee Free Press. at is not,
as most people imagine, a vast bog
sunk low on the ground into which the
drainage of the surrounding country
flows. On the contrary, according to
accurate surveys, it is above the level
ground some fifteen or twenty feet,
and instead of being the receptacle, is,
in its immense spoonelike bulk, gather
ing the waters that descend upon it,
the source of rivers, five of which take
their origin within it and flow into
the sea.
1.-THE swamp is entirely green tim
Der. There is no decaying woods, the
two principal woods that grow there
being the juniper and cypress, which
never rot. They fall on the ground
like other trees, but instead of decom-
posing they turn into peat and in that
form remain Interchangeable and indis-
soluble.
There is nothing in the swamp to
create miasma; no rising of the tides
and decomposition of rank vegetables;
no mashes exposed to the burning rays
of the sun. Ali is fresh and sweet, and
the air is laden with balmy odors.
The water is tinged with juniper to a
faint wine hue and is thought to pos
sess valuable sanitary qualities. 1t is
often used by vessels going on for
eign cruise on account of it's health
full properties and because it keeps
fresh and clear for years. Those who
live near it declare it is the health
lest place on the continent"
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08
cannon,s HomeIx Wit.

Uncle Joe Cannon is sometimes too
homely and direct and harsh in his
comments said a young journalist.
Il was not at all pleased with the re-
mark he made to me while l was
speaking at the x banquet.
'tOf course 1 am an inexperienced
speaker. l can't rattle off words like
the veterans of the Senate and the
House. I admit that 1 began my adj
dress in faltering way. l began, if
I remember:
Gentlemen. my opinion is that the
generality of mankind in general is
disposed to take advantage of the gen.
crafty Of
Here Uncle Joe interrupted me.
"tSit down. son. he said. You are
coming out of the same hole you went
in t'"-Exchange.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08
Mannins's confidence in eod.u

Cardinal Manning was not in the
habit of keeping copies of all of his
books upon his library shelves. One
day he found it necessary to go to
his publishers for copy of his own
volume, Confidence in God" To his
surprise, he overheard this converse
ton, which took place in the back Of
fee, and between men calling to each
other at the top of their lungs:
Say, you send up some of Man
ning's Confidence in Cod"
Cant do it, Manning's Confidence
in God is all gone"
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08
Modern Schools Criticized.

Prof. H. C. Annsling, in a recent
address in London, said that school
and college education were mostly de
structive of common sense The clas-
steal school was not a school OF
thought, but of prejudice, and under
the present unfortunate system of edu.
cation it was chiefly the games which
promoted alertness Individuality AM
common sense
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08
Proof Of Edison's INDUSTRY.

Thomas A. Edison was just II years
old when he made his first electro
mechanical invention. an automatic
signalling attachment and it is now
thirty-five years since he took out his
first patent. Something of his extraor-
binary activity is shown by the fact
that since that time over 1 900 patents
have been issued in his name.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08

never worked it to a silvery edge does
not live, contrary to the rules of the
Society for the Prevention of Cruelty
to Inoffensive Adjectives. One of the
deepest mysteries of modern life is,
since every bride is beautiful, how
does it come that there are so many
ugly married women?
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08

rfed."
.'Oh, yes he Isl retorted the mate.
confidently. 81 was at the wedding
He married a red-haired woman This
daughter of his is a lovely gal; you
Jest ought to see her."
Captain Hills face was pallid with
horror.
THAT gal in your cuddy in the cab
In of the Whydah," he murmured.
George. hif my wife knows that gal
Is there it'll be ell aboard this
schooner"
Don't you worry about that" re-
Piled the mate. I'm no man to get
other reople in trouble. III pass her
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08
From clown to Autho-

M. Jean Richepin, the author Of the
French original of ''Du Barri." just pro-
duced at a London theater. was born
at Medeah, in Algeria, in 1S49, and has
in his time been a, circus clown, a
sailor and miner
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08
HINTS ON FURNISHING A DEN

Often boys display much ingenuity
and artistic taste in fitting up their
"dens'' with furniture and decorations
from their own hands.
With the necessary carpentering
tools, a few pots of paint and furni-
ture stain, few brushes, ETC., the boy
will show his room proudly to his pa
rents and friends, who in turn will
De not only much astonished, but
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08

form a comfortable seat, is covered
with striped cretonne in warm shades
of brown and red. The panels which
form the sides of the box are studded
at the edges with gilt-headed nails
The box may be lined with burlap or
heavy brown canvas
A large reading chair built of dress
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08

Copyright 1905. by Daily Story Pub. Col
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08

ed pine and finished with a brown
denim seat A pillow placed at the
back will add comfort. The wood is
stained a walnut color.
A set of corner book shelves hung
on gilded very small ropes. The cur
tain that drops from the bottom shelf
makes a nice place in which to stack
old magazines away from the dust, or
affords a suitable nook for folios or
drawings. The shelves are made of
dressed pine stained some dark color.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1905-07-08

highly pleased with what he has ac-
complished there. And often the fur
niture he builds is more serviceable,
as well as more artistic, than the
heaply-put-together stuff that now
floods the market and fills the homes.
Besides this, his den" is character
istic of himself, and he will feel
pride in its originality. A few rough
drawn designs for odd pieces to help
furnish a boys den" are given here.
In following them the young cabinet
maker will begin to discover points
for improvement and gradually he
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1905-12-14
BILLS cREEK

Butchering hogs is the order Of
the day
Quite lot of prospective land
buyers on the creek recently.
Three cheers for the movement
to cut a slice of Caddo Country
and attach to Chickasaw to make
Chickasha county seat.
]. A. Wright visited relatives at
Mt. Scott last week.
A mule team Of c. H. Bowers
ran away last week with a buggy
and scattered CHI. and the buggy
quite ways along the road. No
damage to nothing but the buggy
Death visited the home of Mr..
Roberts at Hillsboro last week and
claimed their little babe one year
old. Funeral services at the home
conducted by Rev, Harmon. Iuter-
ments at Cement,