The Globe-republican. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1889-1910, 1905-06-01
THURSDAY, JUNE ], 1905.
GOVERNORS AND THINGS.


From Emporia Gazette
Once upon time . governor of q
great state ate both fish and ice cream
with the same knife and afterwards went
out of the dining room and talked to
people with tooth pick in his mouth =
ElDorado Republican.
Exactly. The Gazette is nearly fifteen
years old. 1t began In the age of Hum
phroy, and has lived under Leweling,
Morrill,, Leedy, Stanley, Bailey and
Hoch. 1t has has had occasion to observe
their ps and Is, their methods and man
ners pretty closely: 1t may be said OF
every one of them that he scratched his
matches on the seat of his trousers. No
Kansas governor has used the heel of his
shoe In all these fifteen years. All six of
them tipped up their SOUP plates when
they were hungry. None Of them eyer
locked the door and put cotton in the
key-hole when lie picked his teeth, as
required by law. All but two of them
cleaned their finger nails on envelope
corners, and all four of them ate pie at
the Copeland, with their knives and
canned peas with spoon. (The blunder
therein was in eating canned peas at all.
They are put in the side dish for decor
alive purposes. and 1t is grossly bad form
to eat either the smilax or the napkins
or the canned peas at any mans table.
Every governor of Kansas since Hum
phrey has violated the constitution and
the statutes of the aiate by using his fork
with the left hand in eating salad, and
four governors have been sword swallow.
ers.
The Gazette offers these criticisms in
sorrow and not In anger, knowing that
this'paper also is full of flaws and has
its own many griev0us sins and short
comings. But as Mr.. Murdoch, the glass
Of fashion and the mold of form for all
the country between Kansss City and
Los Angeles seems to take the foibles of
these four governors to heart, these few
remarks are printed to cheer him up and
to show him that the fellows no wanted
him to take fish commissioner and TO
rustic up the bill providing for the ap-
appropriation for bis own salary, are no
worse than the fellows who didn't do
that much Some of the governors of
Kansas have often lacked considerable of
being ''house.broke. There is a lot
more fun living In a handsome home on
cool hill, above a pretty town, In
prosperous country, beloved of his neigh
bors, and feared by those who speak de-
spiteiuly of him, than to be governor Of
Kansas, and il Mr.. Murdoch cares to
figure it up, he can find that he has had
more influence on the state OF Kansas,
during the thirty years passing, than any
governor the state has had during that
time, with the possible exception of John
Martin and George I. Authony-both of
whom were editors and had moro lnfu-
ence out of the gubernatorial chair than
IN 1t. A governor is bigger than con.
gressman-ands so is nit bigger than a
mibrobe, but both are smaller than flea.
And the moral lesson which should be
borne into the big heart of the handsome
and erudlte editor of The sunflower Daily
Republican at the confluence of tho Wal
nut and the West Branch in Butler coun-
ty, state of Kansas, is this precious
thought; Don't shoot the pianist-he is
doing his best. The trouble with the
editor Of the Republican is that he is too