Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1905-08-20
CITY DiSCOVERER
MEETS AN AUTHOR

What a learned and distinguished looking
individual. the City Discoverer remarked
the other afternoon when in the course OF
one of his long and favorite rambles
through Rock Creek Park he came upon a
tall slender and Immediately dressed
stranger sitting on a bench by the roadside.
II am sure he must be an extremely inter
esting conversationalist. Ill speak to him
And the City Discoverer advanced. hat in
hand his mild blue eyes beaming with
rrendliness behind his gold-rimmed glasses
.'Good-day sir" said the City Discoverer
"A beautiful day. is 1t not?''
The stranger bowed, Good afternoon"
he replied plea sanity. Yes. it is indeed
beautiful day, or rather I should say DE-
lghtful. perhaps even charming would
b, the better word TO indicate the thought
tense OF my then mood. although the mood.
as 1t were. Is not actually dependent upon
the momentary fash OF the brain lens by
which the mental camera-a fortuitous eN-
preston that--receves and retains uncou-
sciously until developed the suspended i'm
preston.
The City Discoverer turned his fascinated
gaze away from the learned-look!ns strang-
Ell and rubbed his head with a fat palm.
I'm afraid" he began ruefully. that
Il
The whole question: continued the
stranger. toying negligently with his eye
glass. 'or perhaps l should restrict myself
to mention OF that portion OF the whole
which | have touched upon or rather indi-
Gated. but at any rate the subject to be
general and not too closely bound to the
text, of atmospheric phenomena as related.
subjunctivey co-joined it were. to
U.s. q more clarified analogy, - metEins
10 which the ordinary. or even the average.
denizen CT this or that or any other cline
gives but too little OF his or even her mo-
ments OF profound and sustained mental
activity.
The City Discoverer swayed dizzily and
ciutched at the bench for support. Real
ly,'' he said lie stared at the stranger
with open mouth. Il haven't an idea
That continued the stranger. tapping
his eyeglass against his chm and smiling
slightly at the Discoverer. rs statement,
an authorized personal utterance. l may
say. which in the ordinary course OF con-
versation. or even in the maze OF argument
tat.ve dIsputation, would well be termed.
characterized is perhaps the better word,
as in the nature of hyperbotc fantasy.
uttered, or IN way unconsciously set
forth, in moment OF oVerqulck cOlloqutdl
coEtrIping and not imbued. far is DIS
Gel nibie from brief retrospection Of the
lHcdentals. with the essentials of original
accuracy"
Inc o.,y Discovercr mopped his brow and
breathed heavily
Sir he biurted out hastily. Il don't
know what you are talking about
The learned-looking stranger permitted
himself to smile.
musugIy, / invincibiy unintelligibie'
You certainly are. said the Discoveier
shortly.
BE not offended" said the stranger gent
ly, If you have not been able to follow
my utteranceS. Uniutclllgibllity has won
tame and fortune and in a way II has
become second nature. or rather. 1 should
say, il has in a measure raised Itself 10 De.
IN a way
Please" said the Discoverer desperately.
stick 10 short sentences and WORDS OF one
ss LA BILE.
The stranger waved an assent with his
eyeglass. ~ hen l was q young man. he
said, Il determined to become an author.
| wrote and wrote and wrote. My stories
were marvels of clearness: my sentences
We're short and straig htforward and power
fuI; my plots unfoloed on approved lines.
But l met with, poor success. Then my
knowledge Of human nature came TO my
aid. With the aid of an unabridged dc
tionary l completed manuscript that had
neither beginning nor end. II was all mid
die and all muddle. No one reading thae
wonderful production OF mine could posi-
bly, discover what had happened. was hap
pening or was about to happen. dldn
know myself. But 1t Was accepted and
published and was immensely successful
Gracious said the City DISCOVERED
Quite So continued the stranger That
was my opinion at the time. After that
first success all was easy. My reputation
has been steadily growing ana with inc
passing years, each story | write Is less
Ineligible than the one Immediately pre-
ceoing. Formerly my shortest sentences
contained not less than eighty-five words.
By careful WORK, aided by experience. I
have increased that limit until now my
shortest sentences contain not less than
one hundred and sixty three words. l have
gone al high as four hundred and fifty and
have gained additions unintelligtbly there
by. l am now at work on a short story
of three thousand words. which shall con.
tain but one sentence. 1t will be more
uninteligible than anything l have yet
done. and will. 1 fancy. be correspondinsly
successful. Those persons who have sufs
ncient mentality to form and express q
disparaging opinion of the alleged litera>
ture for which 1 am responsible buy my
| taxation trying to find out what I'm trying
to say. Those who are not in this class
buy my books and read them because it's
quite the proper thing. Altogether my lot
is a happy one. l growing more and
more unintelligible all the time and my
fame is likewise growing apace. Royalties.
too, are not to be forgotten.
The City Dscoverer rose from the bench
and prepared to depart. The latter por-
ton of this conversation" he said pleas
antly, has been quite instructive. / should
very much like to know who you are. But
quite briefly" he added In alarm. as the
stranger began to play negligently with
his eyeglasS.
GAS you will" replied the stranger with
trace of irritation in his tones. My
name is Henry James"
Goodness" said the City Dscoverer. as
he wandered homeward In pensive mood.
who would have thought it?''