davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17
JOURNAL ENTRIES.


The United Brethren seem to be
somewhat divided on some questions
Anyway, Guthrie. the only thing that
kept US from making it four stfalshe
was that shower Monday
We are fortunate this year. Thus far
we have not sat down on the fly paper
a single time. but the fly season IS still
young
What Job do you suppose Charlie
Curtis will bring home from Washing
ton with him this time for an admirlng
constituent?
The baseball magnates seem to have
moved the Missouri Valley around on
the map. Instead of being located
along in the vicinity of Omaha and st.
Joe as it was when we studied geogra-
ply, it is now down around Muscogee
and South McAlester.
The State Journal reporter who said
that most of the business to come be-
fore the council the other night was of
a light character, did not mean that
Charlie Holiday was asking for anoth-
er gas franchise. Several people were
unnecessarily frightened.
Bets on the result of the state club
federation election are posted at nine
to one on Mrs. Brown. This is official.
Il guess don't want to be a United
Brethren bishop said Bill J. Do ol to-
day. I see the job pays $1,000 year
but it takes 81, 400 of that for travelling
expenses. No, thanks"
Justice Mason is corraling too many
public jobs. If he insists on keeping
the presidency of the Saturday Night
club he ought to resign from the SUI
preme bench.
E. D. McKeever read a paper before
the Saturday Night club on John J. IN
gals which, the newspapers say, re
veaIed his intimate knowledge of the
great Kansan." Now why doesn't Ed
write something about J. R. Burton.
That Topeka girl who married a
young man to keep rival from get
ting him, seems to have an apprecia-
ton of the value of being able to close
an option on short notice.
Jeffries has quit fighting, of course,
but it is just as we'll to be careful
what you say about him. He may be
like the boy whose mother persuaded
him to live IN peace with the other
boys. Il won't fight any more,'' he
promised, but if Snoopy Jones calls me
a liar I'll have to look cross-eyed and
hand i'm one" What will you look
crOss-eyed for?" demanded his moth
SA- w eli can cross my fingers
when I'm f1ghtin', and I'd have to cross
something to keep it from countin' and
breakin' my promise" he said.
Whenever a dark-looking cloud
heaves in sight in the southwest now
adays. a lot of people begin to wish
they had been going to church a little
more regularly.
Taxable property is beginning to re-
cover rapidly from the slump that over
took it just as the assessor was seen
coming down the road.
Some Topeka women who were
caught out in the shower Monday are
more than ever convinced that 13 is an
unlucky number since they found out
that it rained three-quarters OF an
inch in IS minutes.
In the ninth round OF the mill be-
tween those famous heavyweights,
Jack Rockefeller and Wash GLADDEN.,
the indications seem to be that the lat
ter has little the better Of it.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17
SMART RABY sTORY.

The smartest baby in the state lives
at Highland. The baby is only seven
months old, and the Vidette says it
has acquired the habit OF rocking itself
to sleep. Its mother places it in a
large rocking char which she then
puts against the wall. The baby kicks
the wall and sets the rocker in motion
and keeps it up until it falls asleep
Smith County Pioneer.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17
REFLECTIONS or A BACHELOR


Charity begins by getting contribution
out of the other fellow
A woman can whine away a. mans love
surer and quicker than any other way
If a voman's can't find anything else to
be Jealous about she VIII be it over an old
pipe.
Next to fooling a man the easiest thing
for a girl is to make MIN 1eel sure she IS
not.
A girl can change name she ooesll {
like whenever she pleases by marrying,
but a man IS stuck TO his hard ana last
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

Roosevelt has done in the last three
years we would have had the greatest
panic the world has ever known said
Senator Depew to a Philadelphia au-
dience. After reading that sentence
backward and forward and trying it on
the piano, there is still a doubt as to
whether it is a. compliment to Bryan or
a Joke on the president-Wa washington
Post.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

Chicago had a hailstorm the other
day. but the natives thought the strik-
srs were simply throwing bricks again,
and It was past before many people
found out about it.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

Had you noticed that when a news
paper prints the supreme court syIlabi
Tor nothing how much less space it
takes than when the state is paying it
at space rates for doing the work?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17
RULEs REVFRs ED-

A man never knows when to feel
safe. Last season We were told that
as soon as it begun to rain. the danger
of tornadOes was past. This year the
order seems to have been reversed. 1t
rains some and then the tornado
jumps Arkansas City Traveller.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

We are assured that the accountant
VINO has been studying the beef trusts
secret books for the past two weeks has
found out something about them, but
how does that help the price of beef?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

Just as we had convinced ourselves
that the joints are all closed. an unfeel-
ing individual had to call our attention
to the contrary by starting trouble in
one and breaking lady's nose
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

Or GLADDEN. thinks that too much has
already been said about Mr.. Rockefel-
5er's tainted money" but he has not
ehanged his opinion that Rockefeller is
q. srobber."
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17
Causes.

Prof. Simon Newconb the astrono-
mer, said at a dinner in Washington:
THE simplest causes some times pro-
duce the most puzzling effects.
Some years ago 1 spent the month
of August at a friends villa at Long
Branch.
My host, with six or seven of US,
was walking through the garden one
day after luncheon, when we came to
a great glass globe, set half in the
shade and half in the sun.
e Here's a strange thing, some one
said. The half Of the globe that is in
the shade is warmer than the half that
is in the sun
8" ImpossibIer we ehorused.
but we touched the globe. and found
that the glass actually was warmer in
the shade than in the sun.
Then everybody tried to explain this
phenomenon, and the most remarkable
theories for it were advanced.
zone said it was an effect Of refiec-
ton, another that it was an effect of re-
pulsion, another that the exhalatory
law-and so forth and so on.
But 1 had spied the gardener cut
ting roses. and I called him over to
us.
Perhaps you said, can tell US
why the half of this glass bowl that is
in the sun is cooler than the half that
is in the shade?'
50 Why, yes, SIR said the gardener;
7 think I can. You see, just before you
came out, turned the bowl around for
fear of its cracking in the great heat. "
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

The wreck of a race train bound for
Belmont Park and the accident to a
trolley car bound for a Sunday school
picnic near New York this week. show
that it still rains on the just and the
unjust alike.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17
PEACH CROP BULLETIN.

Don't you believe that there is not
I saw a group picture of one of the
sororities of the university the other
day and if that crop of peaches can
be beaten I don't know where one
would look.-Dod Lummax in the
Lawrence World.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17
The Ignorant Landsman.

Capt. Kaempf of the Deutschland
was entertaining a little group of pas
sengers with sea stories.
why Is it" said Capt. Kaempf,
that Iandsmen are so ignorant Of the
sea? Seamen are not ignorant of the
land. It is only, in fact, through know
ing the land well enough to avoid it,
that seamen keep their ships afloat.
But landsmen's ignorance of the sea
it is deplorable."
IN Bremen, one day, I saw a farmer
looking at the shipping in the harbor-
A 'longshoreman was explaining the
shipping to him. Finally heard the
'longshoreman say:
1t is low water. now, sir
THE farmer took his pipe out of his
mouth, and pointed it solemnly toward
a heavily-laden tramp steamer that was
passing.
going past that it is low water he
said, - The waters near over the edge
of her now -
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

Nebraska is getting a taste Of floods
This year. For several years the flood
belt has been located in Kansas, but
Kansas won't object very strenuously
il Nebraska wants it.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17
LIKES A VACATION.

One of King EDWARDS most Iovable
traits is his recurring desire to get
away from the king business for
awhile.-Detroit News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

Secretary Taft has handed to Bow
enc a copy Of LOOMS charges against
him. but it is not stated what has been
handed to LOOMS. Some of these days
somebody viii get handed a request to
Eesign.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

Mr.. Morton. according to the dis
patches, has no intention of resigning
from the cabinet although, he says,
he and the president thoroughly un-
derstand that he will retire next fall.
Does this mean that he will retire
ETIthout any intention on his part?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17
MIssIONARY WORK.

Reports to the effect that one of
Rockefeller's lieutenants has been dis
covered tampering with a grand jury
probably are passed upon the fact that
the magnate's missionary work is broad
ening a bit.-Los Angeles Express.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

s'send your bill with the goods is
the message which Snyder, Okla. sent
out after the storm demolished it the
other day. But If you viii receipt the
bill first Snyder viii probably not OBJ
aarA
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

tive nor to ask embarrassing questions,
but we would like to know if Governor
Hoch thinks the same as Governor
GanIy on the subject Of railroad passes.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

lowing a new scent! Where the packers
made an unaccountable tactical error
was in not canning the stoclzyards smell
and thus destroying the scent.-Chicago
News
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17
THE COUNTRY BoY.

Perhaps you noticed that it was not
town boy who averaged SO in his
school studies during xthe past year
Arkansas City Traveller.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17
COSTS STILL RUNNING.

A thief at Winfield was promised his
freedom if he would RIM fiftv wards in
six seconds and pay the costs He ran
the fifty yards on time and is probably
running yet, so are the costs. The
commissioners had neglected to re-
quire any payment of costs before the
race.-Chanute Sun.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

Now what do you think Of this:
Fifteen hundred school children in
Chicago have struck because coal was
delivered at the school buildings by
nonunion teamsters. Still. this is the
time of year when it doesn't take
much of an excuse to persuade a boy
80 strike from attending school
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

az Gdr. Rockefeller should attempt to
give us money by selling US kerosene
cheaper than heretofore, would we be
under moral obligations to refuse it or
compel him to take the same old price
on the ground that otherwise the oil
would be tafnted2 Will Dr.. GLADDEN.
please enlighten US along this line?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

An old statute prohibiting swearing
and Furnishing it by a fine has been dug
up IN Ohio. And this, too, in a state
where most Of the Inhabitants are poll
afefans
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

Somebody played a mean trick on H.
a. Rogers the other day: Mr.. Rogers
was wearing a fine large pink, and he
was told that it was a Thomas W.
Lawson pink. The air in the vicinity
Of Mr.. Rogers Immediately became
surid
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17
FROM OTHER PENS.
EXCEPT GOVERNOR HoCF

EXCEPT GOVERNOR HOCH.
King Edward has been spending a lot
of time with his dentist recently, and
there is now court gossip to the effect
that he has as fine a set of upholstered
teeth as any ruler in the world.-Wash-
ingtOn Post.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

The Chicago News advises people
who want to make faces at the su-
Dreme court to do so under their
breath, Notwithstanding the fact that
most peoples features are arranged in
such a manner as to make this impos-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17
WHAT'S THE ANSWER?

That Kansas City boy who heightened
himself two inches by machinery has
not done anything so wonderful The
governor of Kansas has grown several
feet since he was elected.-Chicag
News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

The principal duty of an Oklahoma
nightwatchman now is to keep a sharp
lookout for funnel-shaped clouds, point
ing doWnWards.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17
WHO DID Ta

It seems that the unfortunate Caesar
Young and the late lamented Billy Pat
terson are subject to the same world
wide inquiry.-Dallas News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

The Council Grove Republican has
discovered another unlucky indication
about the figure thirteen. 1t took Bill
Rudolph thirteen minutes to strangle
when he was hanged.-Salina Journal.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

quarterly dividend of 3 per cent OF 1
per cent better than a year ago at this
time. This makes a total of "a per
cent since the first of January.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

From a distance the Hoosier governor
looks more like a prize fighter than a
statesman, but he has a statesman's
ideals. His similarity to prize fighter
is also evidenced by the way he hits
from the shoulder at the evils which
threaten popular government.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17
THAT DEFENDS

The attempt to save Niagara is q diff
hcult undertaking. Too many Ameri-
cans think that the scenery has loafed
long enough and should be put to work
Minneapolis Journal
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

There are moments when Mayor
Dunno probably wonders mildly what
would be happening by tx time if Mr.
Harlan had been e1ected.-Chicago
Tribune.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

Having confessed their own inability
to arrive at just freight rates, the traf-
ne managers insist that no one else
shall try.-Detroit News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

When you come down town some
mornings don't you feel like a buggy
with one wheel warped Hutchinson
Bee.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

e is quite evident that the governor
81 Indiana, as well as the governor of
wisconsin. does not ride on free trans
Dortation.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17
KANSAS ooaf11ENT.


Another county clerk is eligible to
run for state treasurer. The county
clerk IN Governor Hoch's home -coun-
ty, Marion, is short in his accounts
Salina Journal.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

st. Petersburg is now advertising
that Rojestvenslzy is trying to dodge
Togo. That is a good way to help.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

ar. Rockefeller viii probably be
able to worry along awhile longer, not
vglthstanding the trouble We have been
making his Standard Oil company. The
standard has fust declared another
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

Mayor Dunno has done another good
khing; He has sent back his railroad
passes.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

AS far as the official scorer has been
able to keep track. Paul Morton viii
have twelve jobs to I'LL after he resigns
from the cabinet, and the season of Civ
ing him Jobs has only just opened.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

And yet it doesn't seem quite right for
the president to put so many good news
papers out of business by giving them
tempting federal positions. = Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17
THE PRICE GA a DRINK-

Five cents a glass; Does anyone think
. lnat that IS really the price OF a drink2
Why, that isn't eryv much to pay
Why, that isn't very much to pay
You are passing DER 'twixt finger and
And if that were all that you gave away
It wouldn't be very much to pay.
The price of a drink? Let him decide
VINO has lost his courage and lost his
And lies a groveIing heap O.. clay.
Not far removed from a beast today
me price OF a drink? let that one tell
VINO sleeps tonight in a murderer's CELL
And feels within him the fires of hell,
Honor and virtue, love and truth,
All the glory and pride of youth,
Hopes Of manhood, the wreath of fame
High endeavor, and noble aim
These are the treasures thrown away
As the price Of drink from day to day.
Five cents a glassg" How Satan laughed
As er the par the young man ouaffed
, Inc beaded liquor; for the demon knew
The terrible work that drink would do,
ana peIore the morning the victim lay
With his life blood swiftly ebbing away;
And that was the price he paid, alas!
The price Of a drink? If you Wvnt to know
w hat some are willing to pay for it, go
through that Wretched tenement over
With dingy windows. ana broken stair.
Where foul Disease like vampire crawls
With outstretched wings DER the mouldy
walls;
There Poverty dWells with her hungry
brood
Wild-eyed as demons for lack of food:
There Shame in a corner crouches low,
There Violence deals its cruel blow,
And innocent ones are thus accused,
To pay the price of anotheris thirst
Five cents a glassi' Oh, if that were all
The sacrifice would indeed be small,
But the moneys worth is the least amount
We pay. and whoever will keep account
VIII learn the terrible waste and blight
That follows this ruinous appetite.
Five cents a glass!' does anyone think
That that is really the price Of a drink?
Josephine Pollard.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

What the Democratic party needs is
sound doctrine" says the Cincinnati En-
quirer. At all events Mr.. Bryan is maxi
ing an honest effort to supply the sound
Chicago Record Herald
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17
MORE TROTBLE

To add to the horrors of the Russo
Japanese war, Alfred Austin is going
to write a poem about it.-Bu4alo
Times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17
HUAfoR o. THE DAY.

Talking is a lost art. except among pug
ilists.-Philadelpflia Record
A German scientist declares that lack Of
sunshine is the cause OF meningitis The
weather man will take notice and govern
himself accordingly.-Omaha Bee.
And yet it doesn't seem quite right for
the president to put so many good news
papers out Of business by giving them
tempting federal positions. = Cleveland
Plain Dealer
what the Democratic party needs is
sound doctrine" says the Cincinnati En-
quirer. At all events Mr.. Bryan is maxi
ing an honest effort to supply the sound
Chicago Record-Herald.
Should the tariff war really come on
with Germany, it need not AFFECT the inn
ported frankfurter trade. The Chicago
packing houses will look after that as
A Paris loop-the-loopist has died with
interest to science IN that it seems to es-
tablish pretty thoroughly that the folks
who do such stunts really have brains af-
ter all.-Boston Transcript.
Get-Rich- Quick-NilIer has resorted to
| cache in a foreign bank for funds suffi-
Gent to last him for the rest of his life
If there has been any lingering doubts as
to his ability, they will all vanish now. A
and save that much money from his law
yers has ability to spare.-Binghamton
Press
Marathon race"
! course in 1775- Harvard Lampoon.
Little Enoch-s'Uncle AMI, how does a
| man run an automobile?
! Uncle Amzi-By issuin' bonds, I guess
/ from what I've read of the cost of keepin'
/ EN- in repair.-Puck.
The Heiress--what is your idea of a
man of honor?
/ is Won who viii pay hees vine beel and
| card debts even eef he as to marry in or
| der to get re money--Ldfe.
Diclzy-Joh1ny. an Marg'ret wuz quar-
reltn over which should have tn biggest
half Of their apple, an I had to settle it.
Mamma-Indeed! And whose part did
/ you take2
Dicky-well. II took both their parts
/ Cleveland Leader.
Distracted Hostess Ito Uncle George, who
| has arrived unexpectedly during children's
party)-Oh, I'm SO glad you have comel
The conjuror l had engaged hasn't turned
up. So you'll do some tricks to amuse the
| children. won't you?-Punch.
Mother-I think Celeste would better
study painting rather than music, don't
you? Then she won't make any noise
practising.
Father-Oh. I don't know. There is an
end to noise, but pictures may last forev-
er.-Detroit Free Press.
"A great many public men are misrepre-
sented in the newspapers.
Certainly answered Senator Sorghum.
"A lot of US are pictured as handsome
men of high motives and marvellous in
/ telIects. Don't make fuss about it. Let
EN- misrepresent. Washington Star.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

Should the tariff war really come on
with Germany, it need not affect the i'm
ported frankfurter trade. The Chicago
packing houses will look after that as
usual.-Pittsburg Dispatch
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

A Paris p-the-loopist has died with
congestion of the brain. The incident is of
interest to science in that it seems to es-
tablish pretty thoroughly that the folks
who do such stunts really have brains af-
ter ADHESION Transcript.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

Get-Rich- Quick-AIiller has resorted to
cache in a foreign bank for funds suffi-
Gent to last him for the rest of his life.
If there has been any lingering doubts as
to his ability, they will all vanish now. A
man who could go through the legal mill
and save that much money from his law
yers has ability to spare.-Binghamto
Press
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

Talking is a lost art, except among pug
Observation-Disclosures Record.
A German scientist declares that lack Of
sunshine is the cause OF meningitis. The
weather man will take notice and govern
himself cordinglY.-Omaha Bee.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

Il heard that an Englishman won the
Marathon race
well, his ancestors trained over that
course in 1775 Harvard Lampoon.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

Little Enoch-'Uncle AMI, how does
man run an automobile?
Uncle Amzi-By issuin' bonds, guess,
from what I've read Of the cost Of keepin'
EN- in repair-Puck.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-17

The Heiress-What is your idea Of a
man of honor?
The Count Throwing out his chest)-Eet
is Won who viii pay bees vine beel and
card debts even eef he as to marry in or
der to get re money.-Life.