Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1905-12-02

t'eTOCEx ant CTrT2v leu ulLu IulO va
rious schemes.
It made him cautious, the cautiousness
that bred laziness and shiftlessness,
for when the roof leaked he put pan
under the hole, instead Of making the
repairs. Some one suggested shingles.
''Well, I'll tell you," he replied. 'You
see my ladder is DID, The rounds are
rotten, and have family to support.
Suppose round should break and /
break my leg-who'd look after the old
woman and the kids? Besides, the lad
der is part Of the garden fence, and
as for putin the pan under the hole,
why, that's no bother If the old wom-
an wants to use the pan, why, she can
wait till it stops rainin'-a rest will do
her good anyway. There's no use max
In slave out Of a woman because
she's ambitious. Besides, on a rainy
day man can't do nothin' but mend
harness anyway My harness is Dor
rowed. What's the good of mendin' a
borrowed harness? No sooner a man
gets 1t mended than the Teller comes
after it. I never knew it to fail"
When every one else was planting po-
tatoes Hank was wondering if it was
going to be a dry summer or like the
one they had nine years ago. And when
Bill Gleason, with a boldness that he
might nave known would have stirred
the very dregs Of Hanks mental cup of
reason, asked him why he didn't turn
up little ground and put in a few
hills Of potatoes, Hank tapped the bowl
Of his pipe and replied:
"What's the use? If It's a good year
Tor potatoes most anybody will give
me enough to carry me through the win
ter; If its bad year, why, they won't
nobody have any" This closed the po-
tato incident.
Hank was the possessor Of an old
bay mare. The feed was very poor in
Hanks pasture. Jennie knows every
blade Of grass in that pasture" said he,
sand she's got every one timed when it
will be long enough to eat again"
Squire Whipple had fine piece of
grass growing next above Hanks
place. About dusk every evening the
philosopher would slowly saunter
down the road and inquire after the
squire. He would spend few min
utes hanging over the fence and notice
u the squire was preparing for bed,
talk few minutes and then go back
home. Jennie, when 1t grew darker,
would be led into the sQuire's meadow
for her evening meal. OF course it
wasn't long before the squire noticed
that his meadow was fast becoming
bald in spots and suspected Hank and
Jennie, Hank from his lack of good
pasture and Jennie from her unusual
rotundity of person.
Becoming aware Of the squire's sus-
picions, Hank devoted part of one
evening to taking down part of the
squire's fence and turning Fan, the
squire's own horse, into the meadow.
Next morning the squire was out early
mending fence.
''Stock get outW asked Hank
Eyes; last night old Fan got into the
timothy" and then with just the slight
est touch Of sarcasm, he added, 1T
wouldn't be dom any great harm if
you'd patch up your fence a bit,
Hank"
swell, l guess old Fan wouldn't find
any great pickin' over in my pasture.
squire" replied Hank with a low
chuckle. This ended Jennie's nocturnal
hannnats and she foil hack info her
observance Of the tardy growth OF
grass in Hanks we'll cropped pasture.
Hank lacked the ability to convert
ais peculiar mental talents into some
thing of commercial value. It can
perhaps be best illustrated by his
method Of woodchuck hunting. Hank
was the possessor of a gun that had a
recoil like q mountain howitZer. He
was particularly friendly toward it,
for he said there was a sort of sympa-
thetic bond between them. 1--WE both
kick when we have to work." as he eX-
pressed it.
When tile woodchuck fever was on
he would shoulder the gun and start
out. Sometimes he was successful and
sometimes otherwise. When he brought
one home he would skin it and tack
the skin on the door of the barn. Then,
when some admiring youngster would
come along, Hank would give him the
skin he had so carefully tanned to
show him where there was another
woodchuck Some one asked Hank
how he ever expected to make any
thing out of this kind of deal.
WELL" replied Hank, "some time I'll
find hole with two in it,"
The proprietor of the hotel at the
Corners had advertised a turkey rattle
the day before Thanksgiving. Hank
went, took few chances, but was not
successful. He spent what money he
had, and it occurred to him on the way
home that it was going to be pretty
dull Thanksgiving without turkey.
Just about this time the erratic sage's
wonderful mentality asserted itself.
He stopped Jennie about opposite the