davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05
'...#
PLANT OF A WRITER.

/ wish they wouldn't thank me when they
send my pieces back
And intimate in soothing terms 1t hurts
them worse than me.
They say tits no reflection on its literary
merit"
And | wonder if it isn't what one of them
might be.
! know the mar is busy, so / never bother
him =
With any but typewriter stuff, quite
straight and plain to read,
And on a little card that's got my name and
address on it
l gently stick the postage stamps the
busy man may need.
They think they fool me, but they don't,
when they say they haven't space"
And that they send back many things as
good as those they print;
They seem to van me to infer my writing
is superior
To their little one-horse paper, but I cam
not take the hint.
Why isn't there an editor who'll say just
what he means
And write exactly what he thinks instead
of sweet regret?
There's a lot of us who really should be do
ing something honest
Who put our trust in printed blanks, and
alas! are writing yet.
II they'd write Rot" or "Beastly bad on
my typewriter pages
They'd not get near so many things from
this Industrious hack
I'd forgive a candid statement on an ed.
itOr's real feeling,
" put I ,-icl Ia ,yo,I1,'a 4I,a 81 -. -.
he sends my pieces back.
Critic
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05
Smoke Stories.

According to accounts the japanese
are experts in smoke rings, and in ia,
pan it is considered no uncommon trick
to blow three rings of smoke in sue
cession, the second travelling through
the first and the third through both.
Some stage performers become so ex-
pert in smoke blowing that they are
not only able to multiply the number
Of rings thus formed, but actually form
Japanese characters representing
words and even sentences. One ,Japa'
nese juggler, it is declared, proposed
to his wife by forming the characters
representing his avowal of love
through a thin stream of smoke.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05
SIS
Home Health
i Club
By DAVID a. FEEDER. Phi. D.. ND.
La Porte, Ind.
PIMPLEs ON THE FACE.

Certainly a very annoying and I'M
slightly trouble is the condition of the
skin of the face and sometimes the
body, known as acne or pimples. y
curious feature of this disorder is that
it seldom is found in children or people
who have passed middle life, although
it is not unknown to both.
Youths, young men and women, suf-
fer greatly sometimes, and the skin of
the face presents a very ~unsightly ap-
pearance. The cause in some cases is
found in unhygienic surroundings, poor
ventilation, bad habits, poor food, i'm
proper methods of eating and nearly al
ways constipation. The real cause of
the pimples themselves is an effort upon
the part of nature to throw off poisonous
matter from the system which should
have been eliminated through other
channels. The pores of the skin are very
small, especially so in the case of per-
sons having a fine skin, and its normal
function is to excrete waste matter in
the insensible p~erspiration.
Under excessive heat or eXertion, or
even great mental excitement, the ac-
tivity of the pores of the skin is greatly
increased. and sensible perspiration
flows freely. 1t is very common to lay
The blame upon impure blood and |
recently-received a letter from an east
ern subscriber asking advice for the
case of a friend, stating that her physi-
clan had prescribed "Fowler's Solu-
ton" with apparently favorable results.
Now, "Fowler's Solution is simply ar
senic put up according to a formula Civ
en- years ago by DR.. Fowler, when it was
fashionable for ladies to be indolent
and helpless, with pale, waXy complex
ions, and it will certainly bring about
that result. Of course, you can readily
guess what my reply would be. Poison
in all forms should not be prescribed
1t is unnecessary, with one or two pos
sible exceptions, under certain condi-
tons which are not likely to occur in
the home treatment of diseases.
Pimples will. as a rule, disappear
| HUH lie lGtt, do well do OIlCl pOl LlOAls
of the body, if the sufferer will simply
observe the Home Health Club system
of using food and water according to the
plan sc fully described in the lectures
and all persons who wish TO keep 6
clear skin must to a greater or less eX
tent observe the natural laws taught.
1t is true that by administering GER
tain harmless home remedies the PIN.
pies and red blotches will all disappear
and, in many cases, never return, be
cause the reason for their appearance
has been overcome. In most cases tn
simple, practical method Of %cleansin:
the system of impurities is best and viii
add greatly to the general good health
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05

A puff of smoke burst from the dust
cloud and q bullet sped angrily over our
heads, knocking up the grass 100
yards a head. The heavy wagon lurched
and bounded and the labored breathing
of the horses rose above the noise of the
pounding wheels.
Half a mile to the ford, sor-r!" He
glanced over his shoulder. "Pray!"h he
shouted. pray to the Vargin! Well
need her help this ride!"
"Whip!" | yelled. Lay on tho whip,
Denny!"
'Yis, SORT" The whip whistled
shrilly. Their backs do be a mass av
blood already, sor-rl"
A volley came knocking among us.
Gilmore and / fired our pistols without
effect.
"Courage!" screamed the brave Irish
man. "Couragei Here's the ford and
the cavalry comm beyant! hear the
bugle and bless God tits singin' the
'Char-rge!' Whooroo! Kape EN- of
but a minute longer-only a minute
longer Fly, ye divils, fly! Don't ye
hear the bugle? Fly!-A hundred
yar-rds-Shoot close, colonel, l can heal
the breathin' av their ponies-"-He
half rose and bent forward over the
horses; but even as tlss lash fell another
volley came and he rolled from his seat
to the torn ground while the maddened
team dashed on into the ford. One feet
ing last glimpse had of Private Denny
Hogan as he dragged himself to his
knees and drew his revolver. Twice he
fired and two horses flew riderless out
of the dust-cloud. Then he fell forward
upon his face and the savage wave rolled
over him and into the river, whence
presently a broken fragment of it fled
away over the prairie with the Nemesis
of cracking rifles upon its track.
And the cornfields now wave where
Denny Hogan fell. He was one who
helped make them notwithstanding
Leader.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05
Private Denny
Hogan
T was when | commanded an army
nost nut nm tho harder CornfieIda

T was when | commanded In army
post out on the border. Cornfields
wave there now.
We had been confined to the stockade
for so long that we felt a desire to romp
across the prairie like young colts let
Loose from the four walls of a gloomy
stall. There were women, a child, Lieut..
Elmore, myself and Denny Hogan, an
Old plains soldier, who came along to do
our driving.
The Indians were hostile; but we had
just finished an active campaign against
them, so l felt fairly safe in giving my
consent to a drive and picnic beyond
the river.
1t was a beautiful day with a moist,
soft breeze blowing from the south. 1t
was a merry party and we drove on
aid on v the springy buffalo grass
until the fort looked like a tiny toy
affair across the level prairie. About
IL o'clock We halted for luncheon be-
meath the shade Of a clump of cotton
woods. Private Hogan hobbled the
horses, leaving the harness on, while
Lieut.. Gilmore and | assisted the ladies
with the luncheon.
Presently Hogan came back and, dis
regarding our cordial invitation to sit
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05
Men in Majority in United States.

Taking it by and large" the male
sex is in the majority in our country by
some ~1,63S,321, according to a recent
ensus bulletin. In some of the states,
however, the women exceed the men in
number, notably in the District of
Columbia. Massachusetts and Rhode Is
land. Usually men are in excess in
sparsely settled communities and WON.
en- in thickly populated regions; cities.
for example, as a rule, have more fe-
males than males. In the later years
of life, the women exceed the men, which
seems to indicate that they are longer
lived. In the period from 16 to 25 years
of age, also, the reports show them to be
in excess. Success Magazine.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05

that the people who are not killed with
bricks will be starved to death. cause
they are going to put a stop to delivering
meat, groceries and milk, Gee, wouldn't
| like to be there with a window looking
out on State street" and dad fairly
beamed with joy at the thought of blood
shed.
We'll, when was there a time when.
the Chicago teamsters were not on a
striker said l to dad. They are the
most sympathetic people on earth.
What are they striking for now?"
oh, some girls that sew o~veralls are
on a strike, and they can't seem to win,
so the teamsters have struck in sympa-
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05

cross-eyed from trouble in his
stomach, and tell her he will
meet her at the stage door the
next night with an automobile with her
own monogram on The side entrance
yes. when it comes to that old John will
never find any trouble in putting the
tainted billion into circulation. Eth,
dad, don't you think so?" says /, and
dad said he guessed that would be the
only salvation for poor old, bald-headed
John, with the odor of kerosene on his
bank account.
But here's something that will make
you stand without hitching, and | want
to get to Chicago by the first train"
said dad, as he turned over the paper
and looked at the headlines.
What's the matter in Chicago, dad?"
says !. HAS Carter Harrison been
elected again when he was not looking?'
"Oh, more fun than that said dad.
What do you think, the Chicago team
sters are on a strike, and they have
blocked traffic. and there is affair chance
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05

him, pointed to the statue Of Liberty
and said:
my son, look at that female with the
torch. That torch says all are welcome
to come to this country who are honest
and willing to help bear the burdens of
our government, but to the dishonest
man that torch means that he is not
welcome. Be honest, my boy, if you
don't lay up a cent. An honest man is
the noblest work of Cod and dad
rolled up his eyes like Dowie, and said:
Peace be unto YOU and then the in
spector asked me if dad had any goods
on him that he hadn't paid duty on. and
| told him he could search me, and that
all | knew was that dad had used extra
precaution in making his toilet, and
that he had to wind about 40 yards of
lace around his stomach. which had
been troubling him since he had a touch
of cholera at Havana; and dad looked
at me as though he would like to electro
cute me for telling the truth.
The man told dad to peel off his out
side garments, and when he come to the
lace and began to unravel it from dad,
dad was more comfortable, cause his
clothes didn't fit SO quick. When they
had got the lace off, and the gloves, dad
looked hurt, and said: THE Lord
giveth and the Lord taketh away" and
the man said it would cost $40 dollars
fine, and dad paid it, and they kept the
lace. And when the inspectors left dad
and began to search a fat woman. he
took me to one side and said: You
show the poorest Judgment in telling the
truth of any boy | ever met. Don't you
remember the verse in the Bible which
says: The truth should not be spoken
at all times, " and then he was going to
give me a swift kick, when | told him
to be careful or the diamond ring he
had in the toe of his shoe would u a
hole in the leather. and be lost, and he
let up on kicking me, and finally we
got off the boat and went to a hotel, and
dad lectured me on the subject of com
mon sense. He said a boy that hadn't
common sense enough to prevent him
from talking when he ought to keep
still, and giving away family secrets,
would bring his fathers gray hairs in
sorrow to the grave. | am going to try
to lead a different life from this out.
Well, sir, you don't realize the changes
that have taken place in ourc beloved
country since we left, almost a year ago.
We have been reading the back numbers
Of the newspapers to find out what has
happened since we left, cause you never
hear anything in Europe about what
happens in America, unless a president
is assassinated, or an Indian goes on
the war path in Mexico. That is all
hey think of in Europe, that we are In
dians, that are confined on our reserva-
tions and not allowed to carry arms,
and that 1t is no crime for Englishmen
to come over here and scalp us.
"Wha do You think OF this" said
dad, as he read an account Of Mrs. Chad
wick forging the name of Andrew Car
negie to notes for 81 5000, 900, and get
ting feeble-minded bankers to lend her
money on the notes, insight, unseen.
Gee, my boy. when we went away, Cas-
sic was the richest grass widow In the
country, buying everything In sight,
and creating a sensation wherever she
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05
BY HON. GEORGE W. PECK.

BY HON. GEORGE W. PECK.
Ex-Governor of Wisconsin, Formerly Ed
itor of "Peck's Sum-" Author of
''Peck's Bad Boy" Etc.)
Copyright, 1905, by Joseph b. Bowles)
New York City.-Dear Old Pardner in
Crime: have more trouble trying to
do the right thing than any boy you ever
saw. When | lie to keep dad from be-
ing pulled by the police of a foreign
country, | seem to be all right, and then
dad will tell me to always be truthful;
and when | tell the truth, and dad gets
in trouble by my doing so, then he wants
to kick me. Every boy ought to have a
conscience that will prevent him from
doing wrong, not n of these vaccll-
lating consciences that have to have an
alarm clock to tell it when to work prop
erly, but a conscience that is like a de-
tective, which never sleeps, or like pills,
That work while you sleep, and regulate
your conscience SO it will keep time
whether it is wound up or not.
On the way over from Havana, dad
had several talks with me about turning
ofcI uCW lcdNto. anu iC Soiu " Nhet
we are about to land incur W country,
let us be honest, and tell the truth. l
said | would try it, but maybe 1t would
kill me, and then dad concealed about
his person all the things he intended to
smuggle without paying duty, and then
he put on a pious look, just like a minis
ter who is on his return from a vacation,
and we stood on deck as we came up
from Sandy Hook, looked at the statue
of Liberty and swelled up; looked at the
Stars and Stripes flying, and wept, and
acted like fools. Dad was pussier than
ever, with over 40 yards of lace wound
around his stummick under his shirt.
and a lot of kid gloves tied under his
arms, and more things than you could
count, and when the revenue officers
boarded the ship dad broke out in a per-
spiration, which was so noticeable that
the inspectors piped him off at once,
and when he say that they suspected
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05
Cats as Food.

In northern Italy the cat is a favor
lite article Of food, even though people
are forbidden by law from partaking
of the animal. Indeed, cats are fat
tened and grown for the market with
great care, and the Italians believe
that they far surpass rabbits in every
good quality. The method of cooking
the animal is to roast it in an oven
until brown, with onions, garlic, pars.
ley, bay leaf, red wine, and some
fragrant herbs other than those men.
toned.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05
CONGRATULATIONS with a Sting.

First Fond Mamma Whose hopes
have lately been dashed)-Our hear.
test congratulations on dear Violet's
engagement, Mrs. Hookham.
Second Fond Mamma Whose hopes
have been realized)-Thank you. We
are delighted. Capt. Norton is such q
charming fellow.
Yes, and so self-sacrifcing."-
Punch.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05
The Horse in London.

A patient observer on n of the
main roads near London counted the
vehicles passing to and from the me
tropolis between nine o'clock in the
morning and nine at night. The re-
suits we're: Bicycles, 4,577; motor cars,
557; electric street cars, 4O7; horse
vehicles, 209; total. $3.50. According
to these figures, the horse is rapidly be-
ing outnumbered.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05
Getting the Habit.

The Saunterer was amused the other
day by the action Of a newsboy from
whom he bought several papers. After
the lad had secured his pay he still
gazed inquiringly at the Saunterer.
who finally asked:
We'll. sonny, what are you waiting
for?"
"A tip said the urchin, as he ran
down the street. laughing, ands evil
IDENTIFY thinking he had perpetrated .
good joke.-Boston Budget.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05
Judicial Verdict

Judge-You are accused Of having
beaten this person cruelty.
The Accused-Well, | had to beat him
to make him do his work. He la an
idiot.
Judge (severely)-You should re,
member that an idiot is a mar like you
or me.--Les Annales.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05
Gmahatth amh Tnurr
By ALICE FISCHER.

put himself to any Inconvenience to keep an engagement while he is
counting. Why should he not do the same after he is married?
That is just one thing am cranky about, and Mr.. IIarcourt
knows it. He would no more think of breaking an engagement with
me now that he would when we were lovers.
But, then, how can any one woman make a set of castiron Jules
for all husbands? Don't YOU think the right sort of man sees his
duty as it comes to him and does it? Edo. All told, it is Just a case
of bear and forbear," and it is as hard to define the mans duties
as it is the womans, though | am considered rather an authority on
the subject, as you may see by these lines, which were sent me a few
DAYS ago:
said Alice: The worlds growing ill
And domestic relations are nil;
I'll set up a school
To train husbands by rule 't
DO you think she cal do it" Ask VIII"
We might leave it that way. You might ask Will if I have trained
him to his duties?
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05

All readers Of this publication are al
liberty to write for any information per.
tanning to the subject of health. Adj
dress all communications to the Home
Health Club. or DR.. David H. Reeder, La
porte, Ind. with name and address in
full and at least four cents in postage.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05
Before and After.

Before marriage a young woman is
satisfied to live on fudge and love,
after marriage she insists on three
squares daily with the fudge throw
In. detroit Free Press
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05

A husbands first
duty is to remain the
lover after he becomes
a husband. He will
go to any expense for
aowers and bonbons or
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05
Done Quickly.

Querist-Did you ever see a sleight-
of-hand performance?
Nearest-Well, l once saw a mar put
a penny in a contribution box.-Har-
yard Lampoon.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05

very dry and dusty here In the hot ca
son and when it does rain it seems so
much pleasanter that i sometimes
think a moist climate would be better
for me. | will leave the matter with
you, hoping you may be able to help
me out of my trouble. | greatly appre-
ciate your interest and help thus far
in my behalf. May God bless you in
your great work. Yours very sincerely.
Rec. No. 10000.
agree with you that it will be nee
essary for you TO go to a climate where
the temperature does not get very high.
or you will have to adopt some occu-
patton which will enable you to remain
in the share during the hot season.
There are many localities where you
could go and probably do just as well
as where you now are, perhaps better,
and there would be no danger of being
overcome by the heat. One place that
| have in mind would be the Piedmont
valley of Virginia; the climate there
is perhaps as good as anywhere in
the world; by living close to the moun-
famous portions of the valley during
the summer time, you would eve ex-
perience a very high temperature, and
the sun would not affect you as it does
where YOU are. while the winters do
not get very cold. There is sufficient
moisture in the air to overcome the
sensation which you experience in the
very dry atmosphere. I would suggest
that you write to one OF our club mem
bers there, whose name I have sent
you. He would be glad to send you
circulars describing the country. If
you could adopt some line Of work that
would enable you to be indoors during
the summer time, l think perhaps you
would get along all right where you
are.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05

Fontanelle.-Dr. David H. Reeder, La
porte, Ind.-Dear Doctor: We are sub
scribers to this paper and like your lee
lures very much. l thought l would
write to you and see if you could help
me about my hair. 1t is turning gray 50
fast. I will send you some Of it. t seems
to be dead. l am % years OF age, and do
not think it should be gray so soon. l
have had any bad sick spells. but
| am nervous. If you can tell me what
to do for it. will be ever so much obliged
to you. Yours truly.-Miss I. E.
know there are so many remedies adj
vertised to prevent the hair from turn
ing gray, but after many and costly in
vestigations, | am forced to the conclu-
sion that there is not, as vet, any prep
aration that | have ever heard Of that
will prevent it. 1t is a lack of a certain
chemical element in the system, and If
there is any possible way of supplying
it, it would be through the tissue ele-
ments. The sample of hair which you
sent. appears to be broken bits. as if it
had been broken off in the comb. IfouLt.
but few if any roots, The Home Health
club method of treatment for the hair,
as described in the book of Lectures
would be the best method of treatment
that | could possibly suggest to you.
The scalp would also be stimulated by
the use of a vegetable remedy of which
I have often spoken in these columns.
I am inclined to suspect that the cause
of the hair turning gray in your case is
nervousness and worry. Overcome these
things, and | believe you will notice ar
improvement.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05

Washington.-Dr. David II. Reeder.
Laporte, Ind.-Dear Doctor: | write to
you to learn something about my in
ability to endure hot weather. AS |
wrote you a year ago, ! was overhead
ed twice. | did not suffer a complete
sunstroke at either time, but it proved
a heavy shock to my system, especially
the last time. | am simply worthless
when the temperature is up to 80 or
more, especially out in the sun where
there is much reflection. l get nervous
and weak and short of breath and Just
have to stop working. | have tried
hard to overcome this trouble, but l
must admit l have so far made a fail
ure. | am sure a part Of it Is imagina-
tive, as I have left the field to work
inside, which l could do with little eff
fort. / know that as | now am i a
do almost nothing. | am just absolute
ly afraid to venture out any distance
from shelter during the hot part of the
day, for fear will be overcome. I am
feeling much better in other ways, be-
cause ! weigh about ten pounds more
than usually do at this time of the
year, which I believe is due to follow
lng your instructions. It Is usually
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1905-10-05

The Bad Boy Arrives in New York
Dad Is Caught Trying to smuggle
Merchandise-They Are Surprised
to Hear About Cassie Chadwick and
the Chicago Strike.