Smyrna times., 1905-10-18
SHORT, SHARP AND SNAPPY.

WlJl REFORMS on paper lOT WulCh hO 10
ceives something more than space
rates.
If Bunau Varilla knew so well how
to build the canal in five years, why
didn't he show the French how to do
| it.
Thirteen women are serving as cash
| iers in Iowa banks and prison records
fail to show one serving a sentence for
defaulting.
Butte is making q hero of Pat Grove.
1t makes such difference whether its
your boy or some ones else who has
been kidnapped.
Alabama wants to annex Cuba, but
the majority would prefer to wait until
we had finished with the insurance
companies, and railroad legislation.
Jerome X. Jerome says that "Jokes
come from Heaven" Marriage which
is said to proceed from the same local
ity isn't one of them.
A former vegetable hawker of New
York now as a leading tenor with
FritziaSchef. His patrons are scram-
bling over each other to be the first to
testify that they always knew he had
a voice.
The negro population of Chicago is
81, 900, of New York, 10000, and OF
Washington, the National Capital,
80, 900, the largest negro population of
any city in the world.
A Government employee writes from
the Isthmus that he would as soon live
in Panama as in Chicago. A better
place to die also, than in Chicago dur
ing a teamster's strike, when hearse
drivers go out in sympathy.
Young Leonard, who secured $500,
900 worth of securities from New
4 Yorker, as a joke, may awaken to thai
= always disagreeable revelation thai
{ everybody does not have the same
sense of humOr.
Ex- Senator Chandler says that ther'
= are arraigned against the President
: SO, 200, 900, 900 of capital, representing
= 21O,OOO miles of railroad. The Presi
dent will take pleasure in showing tina
: he doesn't mind little thing like that
+ when it is a question of regulating
/ railway rates.
= The stork has gained recognition i
20 Georgia politics. The Hon. John Ten
u pie Graves, candidate for the Unite
u States Senate, boasts on the stump
s. his thirteen children. Judge Russell
le a candidate for Governor, apologet
Ot cally points out the fact that he ha
y but nine and asks for more time.
r The colored supplement of the SUI
D. day newspapers are widely denOunce
le for their immoral influence. Thinl
lg ing people are generally agreed tht
ne they should be suppressed, bu
N are they worse than the fashiC
IN supplements that fill the wives of Fl
n teen dollars week clerks with year.
he ings for apricot chiffon negligees al
Ut hand embroidered silk stockings?
3D. The latest development of autom
," bile is designed especially for far
ec work and is not only suitable for plo'
Ie- ing but may be equipped with a cul
~ vator and reaper. The machine cos
n. about 81, 500 and may be operated al
49, cost of 81 per acre. Unlike the fan
OF animal it does not have to be fed a
IL if it is liable to accidents, are not al
the common pillow, reaper, cultivate
and are not the four legs of each hor
liable to accident?
"' The old fashioned American bee W
~ was anything but sweet tempered
all that he could produce honey
freely, is to be displaced by the Ci
casus bee, which is less controvers
20, 20 and quite as busy. The COW, Sec
VIZ 'H tary Wilson predicts, will be displac
~ by the more economical, if less phi
ins matte milk producer, the goat III
'Vr' ., are mans relations to the domei
w. animal world maintained in equilibri
c. and his barn yard caution in no W
~ relaxed.
Reforms the thing now, and wi
81 Jerome is busy in New York, Foil
Missouri, and Secretaries Cortel
Root, Wilson, and Bonaparte in Wa
n0B. -, a,