The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1905-02-09
GIVES MARRIAGE RULES
Mrs. Loves Advice for Manage
ing a Husband.
LOVE AND REASON EQUAL
Beautiful Society Woman, Who Mar.
ried Wellknown Broker and Club
Man "To Reform Him" Points a
Striking Lesson for Wives.-Love
Should Not Rule Reason.

Man "To Reform Him" Points a
Striking Lesson for Wives.-Love
Should Not Rule Reason.
Chicago. Ill.--Mrs. Sidney G. Love,
q beautiful society woman, who mar.
ried wellknown broker and clubman
several years ago ito reform him."
got divorce recently and $4,000.
Using her own stormy matrimonial
experiences as the basis for the text
OF her sermon, Mrs. Love points a
striking lesson for wives. She says:
mo woman should ever depend up
on her husband for happiness. To do
so is the saddest folly. and must re-
suit in heartacho and disillusionment.
Every woman should havesa life apart
from her husband. And don't marry
a man to reform him."
This is Mrs. Loves explanation Of
the numerous mistakes marriages
whose aftermath is the divorce certi.
f1cate.
THE whole trouble is that women
allow their hearts to rule their heads.
No matter how selfish or how diss-
pated q suitor may be, II a girl loves
him she will plunge into matrimony
and close her eyes to possible re-
suits"
you do not favor, then, the plan of
marrying a man to reform him?" she
was asked.
"By no means. / believe the idea
to be fatal to happiness, as rule"
"Of course it depends on the man
and 1t depends also on the woman.
There are some women who are born
missionaries. and who can accomplish
such revolution in the men they love.
But these women are rare, indeed
and rarer yet the men who are sus-
ceptable to reform"
Don't you think love will accom-
plish wonders in the majority of
cases?"
Most assuredly. but do not at all
favor the plan of woman's making
herself living sacrifice to help the
man she calls husband Let her do
her part. Let her keep sweet and
true and lovable, but beyond certain
point she should not venture, lest she
merge her own individuality too who'll
ly in her husbands. and lest he i'm.
pose upon her willingness to sacri-
fee herself
by what do you think a woman
should be guided in selecting a hus.
band?"
Il think she should be guided by
love first. but she should listen to rea-
son when q mans faults stare her in
the face. She should know what quail
tiles to avoid"
What do you consider are the
traits to be avoided first?"
well, a man with an ungovernable
temper should certainly not be en-
couraged. No matter how we'll he
thinks he loves a woman, there will
be times when even his love will NOT
serve to control his violent temper,
and he will say and do things she can
never forget"
What other qualities are distinct
ly undesirable?"
Drinking to excess is habit which
Is sure to cause wretchedness if girl
persists in marrying the man who in,
dulges in it. | advise all women to
avoid men of this sort"
The tragedy of the entire situation
Is that it Is impossible for a woman
to know what mans character truly
is until she has lived with him as his
wife.
by some peculiar process of spirit.
ual chemistry horde of utterly un-
suspected qualities come to the sur
face under the influence of the mar
ried state She finds that she has
married an entirely different being
than she had supposed"
"Then what is the solution of the
problem? How are the numerous dis
nMsioned wives to face it?"
"The only remedy | can suggest is
for all wives to have some vocation,
some interest apart from their hus.
bands, so they will not find it neces-
sary to depend on them for happiness.
The sooner women resign themselves
to this attitude the better for them,
think.
Happiness Is within our ownselves
after all. We can live and be content
ed, despite heartache, humiliation and
despair. A busy life, brimful of large
interests and opportunities to help
others, is wonderful panacea for dis.
illusionment and sorrow"