Waterbury evening Democrat., 1905-12-28
Aunt Maria never glanced at my dis

mean to say that you haven't got it when particularly asked you to-" q am sorry" said, sulkily. q | supposed you would not wish me to
 steal it, that would hardly be lucky" Well, I don't know" said Aunt Maria, thoughtfully; stolen coal is ! one of the luckiest things. I always make point of stealing just little piece from some one else's scuttle and | carrying it about with me. shouldn't wonder if stolen horseshoe might not | be the luckiest of all. It was really l most tiresome of you not to bring it. i should probably have had the most unpredecented luck" . l At Twenty-third street we got out
 and sent the carriage home. Walking down Broadway my relatives | substantial foot struck a piece of iron With an agility quite remarkable in
 lady of her age she stopped, seized the fetich, metal boot tip, and calm ! ly flung it over her left shoulder, where 1 it struck in the eye an unoffending clergyman. causing him to utter howl | of rage and pain.
 That woman is mad" he exclaimed, 1 in loud tones which at once attracted i the attention of the passers-by, "she
 deliberately hurled in my face mis-
 sile of some kind, which may cause , serious mischief. She should certainly | not be permitted at large. Police 1 man." as. burly guardian of the
 peace approached, q must ask your
 protection from this ferocious famale me man IS mad nlmself," said
 Aunt Maria, indignantly. T never as-
 saulted anyone in my life! am a
 widow lady, Mrs Smith Brown-J Jones.
 Here is my card"
 My aunts commanding and stately
 appearance evidently impressed the
 policeman, for he suggested to the
 parson he must have been mistaken.
 After this episode Aunt Maria's feel
 ings required sustaining by a good
 lunch at Shanley's, where she recovered
 sufficiently to, sharply oreprimand. the
 waiter for crossing the lnives, thereby
 leaving a loophole for the demons of
 ill-luck, and inadvertently spilling the salt she again hurled some over her
 left shoulder, which powdered the coat of smart old gentleman just passing.
 Leaving the restaurant she darted nimbly into the road in preference to walking under ladder. and I to save her from being run over by a cabby who could not pull up in time, had to seize his horse by the head and swing 1t half round. A
 Later I unluckily caught sight ~ the new moon and commented on the fact to my aunt.
 "oh where, where?" she cried anx- iously, and catching sight of the pale crescent she at once commenced an ex- traordinary series of genufiections. re- beating as she did so in loud tones: Bonnie lady moon, will you send me present?"
 Now the spectacle of stout elderly lady in crowded thoroughfare bob ping solemnly up and down is bound 10 cause considerable comment, and my ears tingled as murmurs of: Quite well-dressed woman, how 1 shocking" How awful for her son, suppose. He almost looks like a gen. tleman," rose on all sides of me.
 For heavens sake Aunt Maria" 1 | eried' in despair as she strengthened | herself and commenced solemnly to . turn over all the coins in her purse, ! come along, don't you see half New York is watching your devotional ex- ercises?"
 What nonsense you talk Arthur" said Aunt Maria. placidly. If you turn your money you will never want for 1t all that moon. What a pity you didn't think of it.
 One lunatic in the family is enough" I muttered as hustled Aunt Maria through the crowd.
 We reAehed my aunts house without further excitement.
 In front of the house holding on to a lamp-post and chanting to himself in q raueous voice: q am the bee was an inebriated ash man. Upon catching sight of him Aunt Maria horrified me by kissing her hands to him Happen ing to look our way at the moment he let 60 the lamp-post and hurled him. self in our direction. and the next sec ond was locked in his sooty embrace. After a protracted struggle succeeded in freeing myself at the cost of a torn coat Aunt Maria had made good her retreat into the house. where. boiling with rage. [ followed to be greeted In the hall with: "Oh. Arthur. how ex- tremely lucky to be sure. To kiss your hand to an ashman always brings Iuekip
 It vas the last strav. I will draw a Fsil over the scene that followed; sufice it to say on Saturday morning received a note in the third person neIosing a cheek for the money she lad borroued. emitting the odd change. md saying after my disgracsful con iucf Aunt Maria hoped never to see ne again
 The fsvorits nephew now is my soasia. William Brown. And hear hat as -Ilttis Fancy shares in which lke Is Interested went up the day lfser our trip she is now a greater dew -ss va lets than ever.