davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1905-03-02
just Ont of Them.

A lawyer who is fond Of joke went
to supper after the theater with par
ty Of friends, and he ordered coffee:
"Please bring it in a cup with the
handle on the left side" lie said conf
dentially to the waiter. I'm left hand
ed, and can't use any other Kind Of q
cup"
"Yes, sir" stammercd the waiter. 81
will, sir"
lie was seen to hasten a'Tay and con-
fer with the head waiter. The head
waiter bore down Oh tile party.
What sort of cup was that you
wanted sir?' he asked.
Cup with the handle OH the left side
I'm left handed" said the lawyer.
The head waiter disappeared to re,
turn a little later obviously perturbed
1.-THE cup YOU he began.
"What?" said the lawyer. DO you
mean to tell me that in a first class
cafe you haven't such thing as cur
with the handle on the left SIDE? Alb
surd! Why, couldn't possibly ust
any other kind. You must have plenty
of them.'
"Well," said the head waiter, 1--WE
usually has, but I regrets to say. sir
that the last we had was broke this
morning."-NVashingto Post.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1905-03-02
e TAKER OF
CRUMBS
BY Charming Pollock
Copyright. 1904, by Claiming Pollock

'"The red sun slipped over the edge
of the earth and left her sitting there.
She was very lonely. After moment
she walked to the window and began
reading her letter for the fiftieth time.
Dear Lady O Nine was its first line
Dear Lady O Nine
Anne Stacey's laggard fingers drop
ped from the typewriter keys into her
lap, and she whispered the last words
of the paragraph to herself almost low
ingly. The story was too nearly fin
ished to be written all over again, and
yet that was the very phrase which
opened the note lying at her side.
To epitomize the romance Of her own
life was one thing, she thought; to use
its language was another. For an in
slant she was disgusted at the recollec-
ton that she had intended to offer any
part of the little history for sale, and
she was about to tear the page from
the machine. Then came the reaction.
She remembered how many empty
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1905-03-02
A,tu,1. Th,t shed Tenrs.

Humboldt states that he had a mon
key that sled tears when it was seized
with fear. Rengger noticed that the
eyes Of small South A.perics'n money
filled with tears when 10 waaprevented
from getting some coveted object or
was much frightened. Darwin cites Il
third case of a monkey from Borneo
which in the geological gardens was
frequently observed to cry when grieN-
ed or even when much pitied. Sir l..
Tenant. describing the capture Of ele-
plants in Ceylon, says that when
bound some of them lay motionlcss
with no other Indication Of suffering
than the tears which inceSsailtly flow
ed from their eyes. The keeper Of the
Indian elephants in Regents park has
several times observed tears rolling
down the face of the old female e.e
plant when her young one was taken
away from her
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1905-03-02
Dear Mrs. NfalnprOp.

There is generally somebody's lady
as rule-in each district on aom
it's finest Malaprops are fathered, sSme-
times quite unfairly. 1t Is she WHO is
reported to have made that speech
about the glories of her fathers house,
up to the door Of which there ran Il
revenue of popular trees" she who
asked her daughter to play that little
.'malady" she had learned at the Gem
etery' and she again who pronounced
Mr. Brown as proud as Luther,
while the tuft hunting Mr.. Smith was
such a ''toby" he deserved to be tat
tooed' at his club. Dear Mrs. Mala-
prop, what should we do without her:
London Globe.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1905-03-02

SHE LOCKED THE LETTER, ENVELOPE AND
ALL, IN HER BUREAU.
hours she had spent in an attempt to
force something purely imaginary from
her BRAIN She knew the story she had
lived and written was an interesting
story and that she could dispose Of it.
After awhile the tired fingers returned
listlessly to the keys, and the sentence
in her mind staggered across the white
sheet before her.
The end of the procession had been
reached when the dinner bell rang.
Anne Stacey laid the completed manu-
script on her desk and added tie note
to a small bundle locked in her bureau
drawer. Then she stood before the mir
ror and patted her soft brown hair III
several places. The face that stared
back at her was a plain face-sweet
and honest, but far from beautiful.
The mouth was too large, the nose too
small, the eyes sufficiently far apart
to denote intellectually, but not near
ly close enough for that prettinesS
which is worth SO much more to a wo-
man. Anne had been told these things
| almost from tie time that her eldest
| brother had been able to talk. but she
sighed as she crossed her tiny room and
walked into the hallway. \ mingled
odor of cabbage and burned beef as
cended the stairs with the noise Of
many voices Then the bell rang again.
| and Anne went to dinner.
Size had expected to make corrections
in her story afterwald and to post it
when size went out for her usual car
| ride Instead. she unlocked the drawer.
took out the packet of letters and be-
| gan reading them. An oDservant by
stander would have noticed that none
| of them was inclosed in an envelope
There was every reason why all should
have been hidden from the prying gaze
in that manner, for tEey We're love let
ters. Anne had burned the envelopes
three years before, doing her best to
avoid seeing what was written on each.
Not one of the lot had been addressed
to her. Not one of the lot had been
meant for her. They We're the love let
ters of another woman.
| hats the Garm: Anne had asked
herself when she had adopted them.
The other woman had been married the
day of the adoption end not to the au-
thor of the letters She was Il bright
little creature, fluffy from the hens of
her various skirts to the topmost curl
Of her fair hair, and she had kept as
many men wrapped around her small
est finger as there were rings around
the other seven. An author of love let
ters more OF less had not meant very
much to her. So, when she finally de
cided upon Fred, the epistles of Joe and
Will had found mutual resting place
at the bottom Of an extremely dainty
Japanese wastebasket which occupied
at least twentieth of the floor space
in the room the girls had tenanted to
gether On top of them the bright lit
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1905-03-02
THE DEATH DICE.
A Strange story That Comes From
the Seventeenth Century.

A notable exhibit in the Berlin Ho-
nous death dice" About tire middle
of the seventeenth century a beautiful
young girl was murdered, and sus-
picion fell on two soldiers, Ralph and
Alfred, who were rival suitors for her
hand. AS both prisoners denied their
guilt and even torture failed to extract
confession from either Prince Fred
erick William, the kaiser's ancestor, de-
cided to cut the Gordon knot with the
dice box. The two soldiers should
throw for their lives, the loser to be
executed as the murderer. The event
soemnity, and the prince himself as
sisted at this appeal to divine interven-
ton, as it was considered by every
body, including the accused themselves.
Ralph was given the first throw, and
he drew skies, the highest possible
number, and no doubt felt jubilant
The dice box was then given to Alfred,
who fell Oh his knees and prayed aloud:
almighty God, thou knOwest | am
| innocent. Protect me- beseech thee!'
| Rising to his feet. he threw the dice
| with such force that one of them
| broke in two. The unbroken one show
ed six, the broken one also showed six
on the larger portion, and the bit that
had been split Oft showed one, giving
a total of thirteen, or one more than
the throw Of Ralph. The whole audi
ence thrilled with astonishment, while
the prince exclaimed. God has spo-
ken" Ralph, regarding the miracle as
| sign from heaven, confessed his guilt
and was sentenced to death. 1t is prob
able that Alfred ever after did moi
number himself among those who loof
upon thirteen as an unlucky number
London Tatler.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1905-03-02

4 KNOW YOUR MAJESTYS APPETITE.
another fellow In just my size How
In the name OF goodness did yoU ever
expect me to appear in the courtroom
with such things as these:"
"Oh. your majesty" ssRd his tailor
bluntly and without rising as he should
have done. THAT'S all right; you see.
these were made loose because know
your majesty's great appetite. and |
felt that | should leave room for your
majesty's dinner"
You're clever knave." laughed tho
lion II hadn't thought of that" And
off he ambled
''IIa. han' said the chimp when ho
had gone; that's q lie told his maj
esty. but, you see. some people are
easy, and all you have to Go is to fool
them a little" And he went on stitch
ing and singing to himself the refrain,
| Under the Bamboo Tree-e-e-e."
Just then the lion appeared. Look
here" lie said sharply. syon left these
| trousers wide to make room for dinner,
1t has occurred to me that you ought,
| therefore, to furnish the dinner to fill
| them" Saying which he set upon Mr..
Chimp and ate him up. The trousers
then fitted tight.
1t doesn't pay to fool every one
! Atlanta Constitution.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1905-03-02
THE NAME AMERICA,
When 1t Was First Proposed For the
Newly Found Continent.

When 1t Was First Proposed For the
Newly Found Continent.
The name Of America for the newly
discovered continent was first proposed
in the little volume put forth at st. Die,
In the Vosges. in the year 1907 by
WaldZeemuller better known by the
Hellenized form of his name, Hyla.
comylus Three or four editions of this
treatise We're published at st. Die be
fore 1907, and a few years afterwari
an edition without date was printed ut
Lyons by Jean de Ia Place. All these
editions are of extreme rarity, and
probably that printed at Lyons is the
rarest of all, though the library of the
British museum possesses two copies
of it, 1t has never been suggested that
any maps were engraved to aecompas
ny either of the editions, but it has al
ways been supposed that the earliest
map with the word America" marked
on the new found world was the ''Ty-
pus Orbis," engraved on wood for the
"Enarrationes Joannis Camertis in G.
JuIii Solini Polyistora," printed at Vi
emma in 1920 for Joannes Singrenius-
In this map the new world is represent
ed as long island, on which Is the in
scription: "Anno d. 1897 haec terra Gun,
adiacentibus insults inventa est pet
Colunbum Ianuensem ex mandate re-
| gis Castelle America provincial"
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1905-03-02
PROFESSIONAL CARDS
Practicing Physician.

Office with Boggs Drug Co., Plain
Dealing. Calls promptly answered, day
or night. At DR.. r. B. Martins, near
Rocky Mount, every Thursday frem'12 to
Q O'Clock pm. 'Phone connection,
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1905-03-02
Z s. TERRY:
DE N Il / S IT.

Offices now over the Andrews-S Spencer
Dry Goods Co., Shreveport. Rooms 8
and 4. Phone, 1894.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1905-03-02
Supreme Test.

She was a Wisconsin girl of more
than the usual share of this worlds
goods who became engaged to the man
from Maine, civil engineer, whose
business was in the far west. Com
PEELED to separate soon after the en-
gagement, 1000 miles soon divided the
two lovers. Business duties called the
man away, but frequent letters helped
to shorten the months of separation.
Turning her attention to cooking, this
girl of almost unlimited wealth soon
proved her devotion to her absent lover
by mastering the difficulties Of cook
ing in anticipation of that happy time
when she should have home Of her
own Triumphantly she wrote her
lover, Il can make lemon pie, custard
pie and Washington pie all myself.'
Then did this man from Maine and the
| land OF orchards assert his loyalty to
his home state most vigorously and
back over the wires, 1000 miles away,
came this telegram, brief, but emphatic,
''Try apple."- fMe.l Journal.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1905-03-02
Linco1n,= Opinion Of Marriage.

Abraham Lincoln once remarked that
every man about to marry should
stand over doctor with a club and
make him tell the truth in reference
to the chosen partner for life II there
was no other way of getting 1t out OF
him. Also that the parents who would
allow girl to marry man without
knowing. as nearly as could be known.
his physical as well as his moral con-
dition deserved to be scalped.
1.-THE whole marrying business is
wrong" said Mr. Lincoln. "Fashiona-
BILE girls have too often foolish moth
ers, who care for nothing but to sell
their flesh md blood to the highest
hiddnr.N
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1905-03-02
Al hpinal Story For
Little Folks
DON'T TRY TO FOOL
EVERY ONE

Look here" said the lion one day
to his tailor. the chimpanzee, you are
the worst taller l ever had. Just look
at these trousers you made me last
week | just wore them down today
to show you how miserably they fit or.
rather. how they don't fit. Why. they
are III. enough around the waist to put
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-04-15

serious antagonist, and they kept a
groug OF stage hands I'm the wings to
make II brake away when 1t took Keen
In his arms Keen was playing to big
audiences down at the Windsor theater
and one night after the show, feeling
tuned up after lively scrap with
bruin, he started out TO "set them up
for the boys" He found a group Of
them In a saloon and as they drank he
became boastful about his prowess with
the bear--and also with reference TO
the others,
1T was a good thing Tor me as II
turned out" says Keen In telling the
story, when | left the hospital was
unable 20 act, and never have acted
since l had to seek other employ
ment and / have been with Buffalo
Bill for number Of Years, have no
stage aspirations nor do | ever mem
ton In mixed company that | used to
fight the bear
once Billy Edwards, who was for
long time the polite and even-tem-
pered "chucker out" at the Hoffman
house, was whipped by a tramp. The
fellow, whose appearance indicated that
he had no errand In the hotel, sided
up to the cheese and cracker dishes,
which, at that hour OF the day, formed
the only free lunch provided at this bar,
and began the task OF eating their con-
tents with an aWdity which promised
empty platters at an early moment.
The harkeepcr observed the ragged pat
ron with disfayor, but, following the
rule Of the house, said nothing, Just
then Edwards strayed into the bar
with significant nod OF the head the
barkeeper indicated the stranger, and
Bnly automatically approached him
and suggested that II he had finished
his meal II would be as well to pass on,
ns they were going TO hold prayer
meeting.
why Billy you wouldn't throw me
out, would you?" asked the tramp.
mo, but you'll have to 60 replied
Edwards.
"Well, yes, I Will but not until
have done you up replied the vaga-
bond, and with the quickness Of flash
he landed on Bilys jaw, knocking him
down an dout,
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-04-15

/ displayed his best form when he re-
duced the worlds figures for so wards.
going the distance In :05 2-5, which re-
ducel the mark :05 I'D, made by l.. r..
Myers on Dec. 10, 1884.
The GEORGETOWN flyer however, will
nave 10 share the new record with Vic
tor S, Rice, OF Chicago who covered
the distance on the night before In Chi
cago in the same time,
But 1t might be said in justice 10
Du1ey that he covered the distance
from two feet behind the starting mark
IN the final heat az he was penalized
for false start.
w S, Shick Of Harvard, and Archie
Hahn of Michigan share honors In the
short distance sprnts. Eastern college
men and athletes base the reclaim for
the crimson man from the fact that ne
won the victory In the dual games with
oxford and Cambridge. when he equal
ed Duitey's English record OF 100 As.
Shick's friends also claim that his win
Of the sprint I'm the IntercollegIates also
enuue him 90 the honors oft he sprint
er.
The Harvard man ran second 10 Duff
fey when the latter created the present
bEutes for the 100 and performed con-
slstenuy through the year, winning
among many other races the l00-yards
dash In the dual meet with Oxford
Cambridge, and the same event I'm the
dual games with Yale.
Hahn Is TO DE entitled to much if not
most OF the sprintIug honors, as he won
the dashes IN the great Olympic games,
ana also figured prominently I'm A, A.
L championships.
The diminu,Ive Splinter from the
north has been training AN winter,
most OF the time ON the Tee, and has
created new and equaled many worlds
records on the road.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-04-15
WIT AND AUMoR

Col Watterson writes from Spain TO
say that there is a great deal OF
moonshine In Madrid and no doubt
the smoky flavor Is pleasant re-
minder Of old Kenucky-M Milwaukee
Sentinel.
Father what Is the woman with a
mission"
In many cases, my son, she ls the
wife OF the husband with dyspepsia
and holes IN his stockings. New York
Herald,
The unterrned horsemen Of the Lon
don Press have again mounted their
Russian nightmares and rushed 10 the
defense Of the Indian fronter-New
York World,
Col Fleischmonn Of Cincinnati is go
ing TO me pole In 1906 Wen, as tho
poet says, north Is north and yeast
Is yeast - or words to that ellect,-New
York Mall.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-04-15
GETTING READY FOR
OPENING Of SEASON
Baseball Teams in the Pacific
National League Working
Hard.
OUTLOOK FOR SALT LAKE.
Big Chief Reilly Thinks He Has a
Wlnnlug Bunch and VIII Surely
Land the Pennant

During the late scrap between the
Pacific National league maRnatcs and
w. II, Lucas, former president Of the
p, ~ L., the News made the predic-
ton that Salt Lake would have base
bali and good ball. whether outlaw or
not Later II was announced in other
publications that there would be no
baseball etc. but subsequent events
have proved our statement correct.
it was fret planned to have q sIx-cub
league, hut Butte dropped out, forcing
Helena TO DO the same and now the
league is composed Of Sal, Lake, ogden
Boise ana Spokane.
Since Manager Charley Reilly arrived
IN salt Lake, he has worked faithfully
to organize q winning team He man
aged TO secure some Old II Lake IA
yorites Ike To2er Depas Muller and
Thomas, and has imported some really
fast diamond artists. As fast as the
men arrived In this city they were hus-
tied down TO the bail park and set to
work The team IL now I'm fine shane.
and ~7aiy for the opening Of the season
which win take place on the 2Gth Of
this month, All the players are show
Ing up we'll and at this stage Of the
game are really doing better than Reil-
ly expected. on the pitching stan we
VIII have Tozer Thomas, Quick and
probably some others. Lelhy viii be
behind the bat. Tho inneld and out
field win be in good hands. and tho
fans who have seen the home team az
work pick the bunch for winners.
During the week President RIshel OF
the league appointed Bill Setley as one
oft he official umplres Of the league, and
that he will give general satisfaction
hede Is not doubted lie oficiated in
the games participated I'm by the Salt
Lake team, and demonstrated that he
understands the game from Alpha to
Omega. and VIII not stand for anything
crooked.
Word comes from ogden and the 9TH
er cities IN the league that the teams
are rapidly rounding into excellent
form, and the race for the pennant Is
sure to be a hot one pad" Gimln
at ogden has secured some old time IA
vorites and he says the HOLSTERS will
certainly be In at the finish. Encour-
aging reports come from Spokane and
Boise, and each team expects to land
the championship.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-04-15

and Mike Schreck Of Milwaukee. This
match has been the talk Of the town IN
local sporting circles during the past
week, and many and varied opinions
nave been expressed as TO the probable
outcome.
While Gardner Is a strong favorits
here, by reason Of his victory over Root
and the factt that he stood off tho
mighty FltzsimmOus for 20 rounds,
SchreCk is by no means left without
admirers among the wise ones. He
is the favOrite on the coast. The
work he has done at his training quar-
ters during the week has won him
many warm friends. friends who will
be at the ringsIde ready to wager A
few ducats on his chances OF beating
the ex-light heavyweight CHAMPION Of
the world, That he is a strong, clever.
game. fighter cannot be disputed. AMI
mat ne VIII give Gardner the fight OF
ms career Is contidenually predicted by
everyone who has seen him I'm action.
ana even by those who look kindly on
the chances Of Gardner.
The former champion Is undoubtedly
the more clever Of the two; that Is. his
work viii impress the average fight
ian that he has II over Schreck In point
OF rangy boxing and cleveness. But
err He is decidedly clever. He is fast
when he looks slow, and clever aud
tricky when he looks awkward. He
is the most deceiving boxer we have
ever Seen I'm action.
The men are signed TO box at catch
weights. There will be little differences
IN the poundage l65 pounds
They viii get 80 per cent Of the gate
receipts, and win divide their portion
o. per cent 10 the winner and 35 per
cent to the loser The bout IA for "a
rounds TO decision, MARQUIS az
Queensbury rules % govern, ana VIII
lard Bean win be the referee. The prices
are 81, So and So, and a record breal{in.r
house Is looked for. Both men are now
in the pink of condition. according IN
the statements made to the "NewsH nv
their managers.
one Of the preliminary events will
be a contest between George Hacltett
and Terry Davis, They fought sly
rounds In a preliminary to the Hamu-
Hanford contest and made quite a hit
with the crowd. with reference 10 ths
main event there is some tax of the
winner meeting the famous Bob Flt2.
simmons or Marvin Hart,
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-04-15
News as Sporting World at Home and Abroad

thor. lie ran him down I'm Chaplin g.
Cores IN Monroe street. The reporter
was clean-limbed boy from Ann Ar
Dor and Sullivan began by Shaping his
face. The young man coolly laid of
his coat and vest and set about the
champion In the most astonishing way
lie did not himself escape unscathed,
for 'he prize fighter hit him once so
hard that he fell nearly twenty feet
away but he got up, stood TO his work
and finally sullivan was knocked
against table, which, striking his
head, stunned him and the victory Of
the newspaper man was complete.
In the traditions Of st. Louis there Is
the story Of Mike McCool the heavy
weight who keeps a saloon In Firth
street being beaten unconscious by a
man with a wooden leg Jack Demp-
sey was done up by an undergraduate
from Yale I'm railway car. Klran
was whipped TO a standstll by James
Busscy, political heeler In Baltimore
in a fair, standup night. when both men
were sober. Barney Aaron, In his sere
and yellow leaf drlfted into the house
OF lords In Mulberry street and re-
marked that he was a fighter. In two
minutes he changed his mind.
One Of the surcst ways 10 get a lick
ing Is to 60 into q hellrerent neigh
borhood and simply say you can tight
little. The neighborhood win take care
OF the rest julie Keen, treasurer Of
the Wild West show tells Of an expert
ence which illustrates this,
In his earl" life Keen was an actor
and played piece IN which he over
came bear The bear was no prop
erty' creature, but a big, hurly-cnna-
mon whose toes had 10 be clipped and
his jaws mu22led before going on for
the act Even then the bear was a