davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1905-08-10

Outside av other iccintricks livery
room wur converted into an i'm
poorium av paper roses, wild mot
toes on the chandyleers. Afther
roll call the whole boonch CON-
minced to talk at the same time,
wild hair fyin' an eyes boolgin'
the same as a gang av loonytics.
I am Boord av Trade member
mesilf, but I bloosh to say that it
tux me tin minits to git the drift
av the Photographic cackle. From
what I made av it they had the
Rooshian war mixed up wild MILL
merry sthyles, so I slipped in to if
6ct an understandin'. an fer me
pains received a coop av hot tay
down the back av me shurt.
The insoolt mingled wild the
pain almost drove me boogs. IT'S
fine thin fer thin that [ didn't
paste some wan. Yez shud how
seen the fenawla, whin Mrs. Riley
called another faymale's hoosband
q moorman joo. Both av thin
rolled up their sleeves an spit in
their hands respectively. First
they made foony faces an thin
thried to squase thimsilves to dith.
I thought it wur part av the proc.
gram till wan ould hin kicked a
hole thru me favoorite lie paintin'.
"B'gorry!" SEES l.. ''Yez can muty-
late yersilves wild impunity, but
whin yez attimpt to massycre me
furniture, I'll take a hand mesilf."
Sootin' me action wild the word, I
convinced to shove thin all over
the place; but what can a man do
whin some wan is chawin' off his
thoomb, an some wan ilse is
poonchin, his brains out wild a
stove lig?
Joost about that time I remim-
bered an Important ingagemint l
had in Milwaukee. From there I
stint in me resignation. The letter
must av been looted in transit, fer
whin l got back the same club ap-
pinted me joodge av the annual
baby show. Now I like babies
whin there is only wan, but whin
yez how to pick a winner out av
ooople av thousan' it ayther takes
lot av nerve or an abnormal
eyesight. That's wan raison why
I like horse shows. fer if yez can't
pick the winner yez can at Taste
till wan from the other. We had
to rint the colysium as the intrees
noombered nine hundred an
twinty, incloodin' twins, quadroo-
pids an biplds. As I viewed the
boonch I became conshiss av the
fact that iviry babby wur an ixact
counterpart av his contemporary.
Attributin' me dilimma to an eye.
bawl deloosion, 1 bought mesilf a
tillyscope. The iffict wur startlin'.
Do yez mind, iviry wan av thin
had DOODLE chin an rid toes.
Av coorse I cudn't choose the bist
whin there wurn't any Dist to
choose, so I intinded to tie a rib
bon on thin all whin the time
came. Iviry five minits some fond
mither wud come in me Office an
say:
"Well, Mr.. Muldoon, don't yez
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1905-08-10
I(~ET UP, Jack! Get up,
you lazy thing! You act
as if you are all in Did

1t IS the greatest WOnder 10 me
how anyone could keep SO much
down and live. Don't you hear
those geese out on the lake? A
large flock arrived last night and
we must not allow them to depart
until we bag some of them. They
are fat ones"
"How do you know they are
fat?" said Jack. "You have not
been out of the tent this morning"
81 Judge SO from the gurgling
noise they made last night. Don't
you know when a goose is fat its
voice sounds as if it was cracked,
for instance, like that fiddle you
were saving away upon last night?
And there is a large number OF
them"
"Did you see them?'' asked Jack.
''No. But don't you suppose l
can tell large flock from two or
three? Why, have hunted ducks
in the North for five years and
often killed hundred at time"
"Well, there might be a flock
out there, but l don't believe you.
You are only trying to make me
turn OUT said Jack, rubbing his
eyes.
'Is your gun in good order, and
how many shells have you loaded
with buckshot?" I asked.
"About five hundred,'' was his
reply:
"Well, I have two or three hun
dred, so I guess we will not run
short Of ammunition" [ replied.
By this time Jack had dressed
himself and was ready to start.
After examining our guns and COL
Letting our shells we walked down
to the lake where our boats were
fastened. We stepped aboard and
padded out in the direction from
which came an almost deafening
sound of squawking and splashing
of water. After padding about
half mile we discovered that the
surface of the water was covered
with hundreds of geese. Stop.
ping my boat I waited until Jack
arrived and he inquired which was
the best way to get at them.
"WelI, the wind is in the right
direction, and we can let our boats
drift along until we are in the
midst of them. You paddle about
twenty rods to the right, then lie
down in your boat and allow it to
drift, and I will start from here
and do the same and in few mo-
ments we will be among them.
Don't shoot until they begin jump
ing upon your boat to warm their
feet as they will certainly do this,
the water being cold and they will
not take fright from the boats
floating among them"
After giving him few more
pointers on how to proceed, l lay
down in my boat and permitted it
to drift at it's own sweet will
Occasionally I would steathily peer
over the edge to ascertain if I was
approaching my game. Soon I
discovered that the immense flock
was under way and coming toward
me. Talk about squawking! They
made noise enough to raise all the
Romans of the past from the dead.
Soon I could hear them all around
the boat. Looking up I saw an
old gander sitting on the gunwale,
too busily engaged in shaking the
water from his back to notice me.
Presently he jumped into the boat
and started toward me. Reaching
out I caught him by the neck and
soon had him geese de combat and
placed him in a sack. No sooner
was he out of the way than two
more made there way aboard. I
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1905-08-10
Il profitless Goose Hunt.

dUOdIu. ao My OOoI WOuAu AOi
contain any more, l decided to
commence action with my gun.
1 fired point blank into the flock,
which must have contained sever
al hundred. The result was most
gratifying, as at each shot two or
three geese were secured.
Picking up my paddle l pro-
ceeded to send the boat toward the
floating evidence >of the good
shooting qualities of my gun. [
found that I had succeeded in
bowling over about seventy five.
After placing them in the boat /
padded over to Jack, who was
busily engaged in picking up the
results of his bombardment, and
asked him what success he had had.
ooh, I have bagged about one
hundred and fifty" he replied.
"Well, that beats me about sew
enty. five," said [.
"Say, Bert, while I was lying
down in my boat an old gander
reached over the boat and tried to
eat my fingers.
cha! Ha! No wonder" I re-
piled. "Your fingers certainly
look enough like angleworms to
fool even a wiser mind than that
of a goose
swell" said he, 1--WE must get
our geese ashore as soon as posi-
BILE, it is getting pretty warm and
they may spoil before we can get
them to the market"
After we reached shore and
stretched our aching limbs for
they had been cramped for a
long time-we unloaded our geese
and carried them up to the tent.
After we had them placed in our
store tent We lit our pipes and sat
down to discuss the good luck we
had had in following my plans in
approaching the geese.
"Now, Bert" said Jack, "what
in the world are we going to do
with all those geese?'
"I'll tell you what" I replied.
eve will secure team and haul
them to town, pack them in crates
and ship them to Chicago"
"That is a go, I never thought
of that" said he, blowing out large
rings of smoke. "You are won
derful man"
II don't think there is anything
very wonderful about that" re-
piled. eff we don't ship them
they will spoil on our hands, and
it would be a sin to allow that.
You 60 over to Mr.. Jones and see
if you can secure a team and l will
prepare the geese for shipment
during vOur absence"
While Jack was gone I sorted
the geese, putting the large ones
in one pile and the small ones in
another. Soon l heard the rat
thing of a wagon and looking up
saw Jack with team and large
double-box wagon. We soon had
the geese loaded, and after placing
everything in order we started fol
town. Arriving there we drove to
a livery stable where we put up
the team and then proceeded to
crate our geese for shipment. We
had in all twenty-five crates.
Then we went to the freight Office
of the G.. T. & Q. railroad and in.
quired what the rate would be to
Chicago for twenty five crates OF
dead geese. The agent gave US
cheap rates and we soon had ou1
game loaded in car and billed to
game commission house at Chi
cago with whom we had had pre-
vious dealings Of a like nature.
After the train had pulled out
we went to hotel and made ar
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1905-08-09
FEATHERED GLUTTONS.
Some Very Greedy Birds That Arc
Tremendous Feeders.

Despite the fact that "the appetite
Of Il bird" has become common phrase
for light eating Investigations show
that birds are tremendous feeders. The
diet of the average kcstrel "a small Eu-
roDean hawk is calculated at 1,OOO
mice a month, to say nothing of insects
and worms. The barn owl is as vora-
cious as the kestrel. An investigator
after caglng one of these birds, gave it
seven mice one after the other. The
first six Immediately disappeared, each
with a gobble and gulp, and the owl
did its very best to treat the seventh
In a like manner. Limitations of abb
dominal capacity, however, prevented,
and though the gobble came off the
gulp did not, so that for twenty min
utes or so the tail of the seventh mouse
dangled from the corner of the birds
beak. But in due course it swallowed
the body, and three hours later the
pangs of hunger reasserted themselves
and the owl ate four more mice.
Four pounds would be heavy weight
for heron. Yet one of those birds,
which was trapped i'll England, dls-
gorged two recently swallowed trout,
one of which weighed two pounds and
the other one and half pounds. An
other captured had contrived to put
away three trout averaging three-quar-
ters of a pound apiece, although it was
only four months old, and another had
dined upon seven small trout together
with a mouse and a thrush.
Among the greediest birds are wood
pigeons, which will continue to gulp
down food until their crops are almost
at the bursting point. From one of
these birds, shot as 1t was returning
from raid in the fields, no fewer than
800 grains of wheat were taken. An
other had contrived to cram down no
fewer than 900 peas. a third was en-
| deavoring to sustain nature with $50
beech nuts and fourth with sixty
acorns.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1905-08-09
BITS FROM THE WRITER'S.

There is nothing in life worth max
ing a secret of-eXcept ones income
Seton Merriman.
Civilization means universal civllity
and to be civil to everybody argues n
great power of telling les.-Eden PHIL
potts.
How exquisite in life is the art Of not
seeing many things and of forgetting
many that have been seenl- James
Lane Allen.
Truisms, whether they lie In the
depths of thought or on the surface,
are at any rate the pearls Of expert
ence.-George Meredith.
Have you never observed that II you
conscientiously neglect to do your work
it somehow manages to get done with
out you?-Henry Harland.
Relations, as somebody SAID, are dis
agreeable acquaintances inflicted upon
us by Providence But it is no use
losing ones temper about what they
say. 1t only pleases them.-Richard
Bagot,
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1905-08-09

How We came to pronounce July as
we do now with the accent on the sec
pnd syllable Il one Of tie unsOlved mys-
terics of speech. Namel, Of course, aft
er julius Caesar, it should really be pro
nounced to rhyme with duly" and so
our forefathers actually did pronounce
1t. Spenser, for instance, has the line,
"Then came hot July boyiing like to
fire. and even so late as .IOhnsOns
time the accent was still on the "Ju."
1t is one of many words which would
startle those ancestors of ours, spoken
as we speak them now.-London
Chronicle.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1905-08-09
OLD TIME DENTISTRY.
queer Instruments In Harvard Den
tai Schools Collection.

tai SchOoPs COLLECTION.
Like many other of the new" pro-
fesslons, dentistry is a very old one.
1t is known that 400 years before the
beginning Of the Christian era Egyp-
tian dentists filed teeth with gold, but
no trace of their methods of doing their
work has ever been found. Aescula-
Plus, the patron of physicians, was the
first famous dentist in Roman history,
and the old Romans used toothpick
very much like the little wooden one
that is made today. The Arabians
ages ago produced a dentifrice, but 1t
soon seemed to be very generally used.
The story of dentistry Is told In the
Instruments it has employed. AS they
are known today they had their be-
ginning in the sixteenth century, but
their evolution has been slow. In the
Harvard Dental school in Boston there
is Il collection of instruments used by
dentists in the first half of the last cen
fury. One of the formidable tools 1t
includes is what was called key.
doubtless from its peculiar shape
which was used for extracting teeth.
the process being to slowly and pain
fully twist and pry the offending molar
out Of its place. In order that no mis-
take should be made the dentist began
operations by hammering and prod
ding one tooth after another with Il
sort of bludgeon until he had satisfied
himself-not to mention The tortured
patient-that he had found the most
sensitive one and therefore the most
likely candidate for extraction.
The grandfathers of the delicate steel
tools that lie in rows on the modern
dentists table were small in number,
but large in awfulness. There are in
the Harvard collection chis"ls and NAL
let's rude fofceps for removing the
teeth, miniature crowbars used to re-
pair cavities for filling, nlcs for sharp
ening the cutting and grinding sur
faces of teeth and one particularly
horrld instrument. known as the pei
lean, with which teeth were "lif,ed."
How rapidly and recently dentistry
has become one of the important
sciences appears in the fact that in
the middle of the last century black
smiths were doing their best-or worst
to relieve the victims of the tooth
ache while today institutions like the
Harvard Dental school attract stu
dents from all over the world. Be-
sides, while It was sure torture to go
to the dentist in the so called good
old days" such a visit now Is COM
paratively comfortable, 80 far has the
profession gone in the direction of per-
forming its operations without caus-
ing pain.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1905-08-09

That The earth will eventually dry up
ana all living things viii die of thirst
Is the theory of a scientific writer. He
says that in. both Africa and Asia, and
ingeed in all the great levels Of the
world. the water beds are drying up.
Many lakes well known during the his
torical period have entirely disappear
ed. while others are shrinking rapidly.
"Eyplotltions in central Asia have
proved that for centuries a zone stretch
ing from the east to the southeast Of
this part Of the cars dominion has
been drying up. Deserts are gradually
sprcad'.g, ana reports show that it is
only in the neghborhood Of mountains,
round whose brows vapors condense
and fall, that irrigation can be carried
on or life itself can be preserved"
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1905-08-09
An Old English Ballad.

"Greenslecves' is n good old English
ballad and tune mentioned by Shake
speure in the merry Wives of Wind
sor" and has been favorite since the
latter part of the sixteer III century.
The tune Is luch older than the words,
probably as old as the days of Henry
VIII. 1t is also known as ''The Black
smith" and THE Brewer" and was a
great favOrite with the cavaliers. A
modified version is found in the Beg
gars Opera" The tune is still sung to
christmas comes but once year.
and many other songs of the same
rhythm or with the burden (Which no.
body can deny"
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1905-08-09
THE IRISH PEASANT.
5is Hospitality Is Only EqunIed by
His Courtesy.

The especial characteristic Of the
Mathew, In ireland" is an old fash
ioned courtesy They are all sure, he
asserts, that they are descended from
chiefs, and their manners are ruled ac-
cordingly.
Take shelter in any hut on the noun
tains, and you will be greeted as II its
inmates had been longing to see you.
This will not be due to the fact that
you seem prosperous indeed, you
would he even more graciously wei
coined If you were in rags. Nor is their
courtesy only exhibited when they are
hosts. once when was exploring the
Burren of Clare ragged old woman
seated by the wayslde accosted my
equally ragged driver Excuse me,
sir" she said, but did you happen to
meet loaf on the road?" "'Deed then,
ma'am," said he, bowling respectfully,
land I'm sorry | did not" "Who was
she?" | asked him when we had driven
out Of her hearing "'Deed then, and
don't know" said he. "'Tis some poor
soul that has lost her loaf and will be
goin' to bed hungry tonight" On an
other occasion an aged man, clad in
knee brcechcs and Il swal oWtail coat,
addressed me as | was cliu bing path
in Connemara. Il am thinliin, sir"
said he, that you are Mr.. John Blake"
"Well, sir" said l, you are thinking
wrong" "Wcll, sir" lie answered sol
EMMY, "says to myself as | saw you
come up the side, that is Mr. John
Blake, aud If it's not, says to myself,
'tis fine upsthandin' young man he is,
whoever he is" Now ! am convinced
that he knew | was stranger, but was
not that charming way to suggest
that | should sit beside him Oh the low
ferny wall and discuss the ways Of the
world?
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1905-08-09
STYLES IN COATS.
Origin of the Cutnwny Frock. tho
Sack and the Dress Cont.

The modern cutaway sprang from
the body fitting justaucorps OF the
French as known to the courtiers OF
Louis XIV and Louis XIV, ana the gar
ment was in turn probably evolved
from the frock or tunic worn in the
fourteenth century.
The first trace of cutaway in any
thing like its present form, says the
Sartorial Art Journal, IS seen in old
prints of French military uniforms,
early in the eighteenth century. For
civilian use it was worn in England
about 1885 as riding coat, the tails
being very long In 1883 ii was adopt
Ell in France for walking as well as for
riding and was then in shape and cut
much nearer the modern cutaway than
any of its predecessors, though it was
usually double breasted.
Early in the nineteenth century the
cutaway had eight or nine buttons,
only the fourth, lGth and sixth being
used. This admitted Of the waarer
showing his neckclOth, fancy waist
coat and frilled shirt to the best ad-
vantage. Not till 1910 or thercabout
did the cutaway become almost identi-
cal with the modern garment aul since
then the changes in It's shape have
been comparatively slight. In 1911 the
word GETAWAY" became fXture in
the language.
The old colonial uniform worn by
Washington, with its flaps buttOned
back; the coat worn by Nelson at the
battles of St Vincent, the Nile and
Trafalgar, and the coat worn by NapO-
leon when on his way TO st. Helena
were all in a general way similar to
the cutaway frock.
The conventional dress coat Of our
time is rcGued younger b"o'her. 50
to speak, Of thc cutnway frock, and
for Il we are indebted to the French.
who on the other hand credit the Eng
lsh with originating the coat that has
evolved into our double br2l&tcl frJck.
The coat last named was introduced
into France by Montcsquleu in the
year 1850.
incidentally. we may add, the pres
cnt blacl; dress coat has By the Eng
lish speaking nations been restricted to
evening wear little more than half Il
century. In some continental coun-
tries the dress coat is proper form
for wear mt court or other important
formal jscmblages held in the day
time.
The sack coat probably dates from
the "NtacarNni2s," who introduced it
into E"gi ,l in 1772, though a gar
ment somewhat similar WIS worn by
the Roundhe0ds of C,omwers day.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1905-08-09
TIE DOCTOR KNOWS.
He IL Not Deceived by the story His
Patient Hands Him.

1t was late, the doctors patients had
either pnsseS away or were mending,
and he was sitting with a number of
his acquaintances in corner of the
club room.
Its strenuous life we lead,
droned the man of medicine, with the
grim side turned uppermost as a rule,
but now and then we get a laugh out
Of it--a laugh with the lid on, of
course; we can't aifo.4 TO show were
amused | often wonder" he went on
genially, "why some of you chaps ever
send for physician. You don't tell
him the truth once in twenty times.
You're in bad way and you're sorry,
and to hear you talk I'd think your
mouths were cold storage boxes for
butter. You suspect that lobster or a
rich sauce you ate day before yester-
day is at the bottom of the trouble.
You know what's curled you up, and
you're frightened out of years
growth for fear I'll learn.
"Accordingly, instead of taking me
into your confidence. you tell me an
impossible story. And If | cross ex-
anime you closely and hedge you in
you'll reluctantly admit that you've
been somewhat inGiscrcet. You smoked
four cigars Thursday ana took six
drinks. Doesn't 1t ever occur to YOU
that know by your lnttcrs that you
smoked from breakfast TO bed and
took sixteen drinks and six more for
good meusuref
"If | were TO believe you and dose
you for your ailments rs you describe
them you'd never get well. Now and
then have to give You strychnine and
nitroglycerin to restore tie action Of
the heart and to listen TO you | might
conclude that you'd had too much pink
ice at a chldren's party.
"As l hinted, we doctors get some
fun out of 1t, but what do you do it
for? We were not always doctors, we
haven't always taken the best care of
ourselves, and we're not fools."-
Providence Journal.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1905-08-09
LIFE ON A WARsHlP.
why the Men Are Allowed to Indulge
In Athletic sports.

why the Wen arc AIlOWcu 10 Ihuuikc
In Athletic sports.
TO see a thirteen inch gun loaded
and fired IS Il sight not to be forgotten.
The projoctile is thirteen inches In
diameter, about three feet in length
ana weighs l,l00 pounds. The powder
charge for target practice is 25O
pounds. The cost for each shot Is
about $500. when all is ready on the
range the signal siren sounds, there is
Il binding flash, a roar like thunder
and Il jarring shock. Then you hear
the whining scregch Of the shell, for
all the world Ike Il fast express round
ing Il sharp curve The projectile is
visible almost from the time it leaves
the gun. You see It rip through the
target ana strike the water beyond
throwing up Il column of liquid many
feet high. The shell skips, much like
the fnt stone skipper of our boy
hood, and again Il column of water
shoots up two miles or more farther
ont, to be repeated time and again.
The shell in It's flight can be watched
without tie aid Of glasses for eight
miles or more in clear weather.
While the life of Il sailor, from cap
tain down to apprentice, is an almost
continual round Of work, some time Is
found for athletic sports, such as
boat racing, football and baseball. The
object Of this is to give the men rec
rCati0n ana mt the same time to foster
the spirit of competition. Besides, 1t
makes TIE men easier to manage. The
shin with strong football or baseball
team or the fastcst race boat almost
invariably has happy and easily
managol CrcW-a crew that will swear
that it's officers are the finest men In
the world. Gnd likewise the officers
swear by sn.h Il crew. Some ships
have training tables for their athletic
teams, the expense usually being de-
fraycd by the officers. The team or
boat crew, as the case may be, Is
pettel by the officers and idOlized by
the crew. AMI for some time before a
harl contest The men are excused from
various duties in order that they may
give more time to training.
E,.n butlpslly ana cruiser has its
race boat purchased by contributions
from officers and men. The prices paid
for these boats is, as Il rule, contingent
upou heir winning certain specified
race. The builders are willing to take
chance, knowing that the crew will do
ity I,rt D., ..-'u 1'nr - winning boat the