Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1905-08-27

IT was a sad day for Sam when his
friend with the large supply OF the
Spirits OF seventy six" happened into
II town. Sam has another name, quite
distinguished one. in fact but it doesn't
count in this narrative. Those who are
acquainted with him-and there are lots OF
people in Washington who are-know him
as Sam. and that shall be the only title he
will have in this story.
Sam has absorbed the heated atmosphere
along Pennsylvania avenue during score
or more of summers. and he has likewise
soaked his system In the cold avenue
breezes Of as many winters. During his
residence here Sam has also absorbed other
things besides heated atmosphere and he
has soaked his system in other things than
cold avenue breezes.
But that was in the past. That in
the days which Sam now describes as
when I was rumuatiu,' or when l was
treking down the lurid pathway
Serious things happened TO Sam In those
days. and many night he failed to report
at his humble home and rest his weary
body in his bed. He preferred a down.
town doorway or the soft side OF a paving
stone instead II was much easier for Sam
to get to the latter berth than 1t was for
him to pilot himself through the devious
and uncertain streets and byways of the
great city to his domicile. Somebody was
always changing the streets on Sam and
causing him trouble. When he did get
home at night it was sheer accident
But those things all happened in the past
when Sam was endeavoring to cremate his
esophHgus with fiery liquids He finally
got 10 the state where he was always ac-
compauied by menagerie of the most gro
tesque and bizarre creatures that ever in
habited a spectacular Imagination.
One day several years ago. when Sam
was wandering along the avenue giving his
nenAgerie an airing he spied a comfort
. ahle-lookiHG water wagon and was assisted
thereon by several we'll wishing friends 1t
took some time for him to get accustomed
20 the strange vehicle, but by the use Of
straps. nerve medicine. etc. he managed to
stick aud got he could keep his seat
without assistance. He has been riding in
the white-rIbbon conveyance asslduousIy
ever since and travelling the straightaway
course instead of the circuitous route I'M
TIL
But that Is the tale about TO be told
The other night there dTiCted into town
one of Sans pals of the PAST Many a
time and oft had they kept each other COM
pauy in disDOsing OF tall tankards of vari-
Gus beverages On several occasions they
lad even traded with each other specimens
or their respective menageries A number
of times they had occupied adjoining pad
ded wards at the hospital. Sans friend
had the stronger constitution of the
two and he was stlll travelling dangerously
near TO the serpentine belt.
-
The two old pals met on the avenue and
there was a cordial exchange OF greetings
Just how the rest happened no one seems
to know. Sam isn't positive about it him
self and he was there. However. he gives
his version Of how he thinks It happened In
the following language:
You see" said Sam lit wuz this way.
There wuz two OF us. We hadn't seen each
other for years. He was a pal OF mine in
the days when | used to go to sleep Satur-
day night and wake up some time next
month. After we had passed each other
the happy frien's return sketch, BIZ says
Let's take a tonic
Can't do IT,. says I. I've cut out the
snake bite stun an It's muffin but II q
or a little yichy fer mine now
Step from under. says Bill, I GER
tainly am ashamed NV you. you four flush
er you water-bibber, you worse than hu-
man.
"But / only folded me hams across me
chest like the hero OF the ten-twen- thirty
houses, and said: No. Bill, I've learned TO
say no. an I've said It..
"But Bill amt none NV yer easy kind he
sticks like the shine on a pane of glass.
Sam, he says. I've got some of the
smoothest, oiliest. best-tastin' liquid in my
pocket that ever creased the brono pial