The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-11-07
HUMOR OF TIE DAY

HUMoR or TIE ply
cobwigger-Henpeck's home ties
seem rather irksome.
Merritt-Especiall the neckties his
wife makes for him.-Hsrper's Ba-
zar.
Instead Of begging said the kind
lady, you should save up something
for a rainy day"
IF I did, lady" said RemorsefuI
Robert, s1t would be just my luck fer
there to. come a long drought. In
dianapolis Star.
Great Magnate-Whyl You want a
million! I can give you but one hun
College PTesident-That won't do.
AS long as we're going to accept
tainted money, we must have enough
to pay for the damage to our reputa-
tiOn.-Life,
"Kou seem to have a pretty large
cemetery here. my friend"
what causes most of the deaths. if
aWui. liver complaint, mostly"
yeah. A Teller with white liver
4--A8
gulch, stranger. Puck.
81 beg your pardon, waiter said
the tourist in the railway restaurant,
did you say that I had twenty min
utes to wait er that it was twenty min
utes to eight2"
81 said nayther." answered the Hi
bernian attendant Il said yez had
twenty minutes to ate, an that's all
yez had. Yer thrain's gone nevl'i-
Cleveland Leader
Farmer Sosede-What's thet book
yer readin' all about, Mandy2
Aunt Mandy='Bout the war,
Joshua. It's one O. these here hysteri-
cal novels.-Brooklyn Life
''You are always having more OF
less trouble, aren't you?' said tbs
Sympathetic friend
You are mistaken, answered the
car with hauteur we never have
less. w ashington Star.
"Ah, darling" remarked Viewed, 81
see you have prepared some pudding
with your own little hands. What
kind is it, pet?''
'sT-that," sobbed Mrs. Viewed, sis
b-bread. Chicago Daily News.
"Pop, what a synonym
Its one of those places where you
have nothing to do for a big salary
That's right my son. Always come to
papa for Information in your studies"
Baltimore American.
1T don't think I'm eonceited.' said
Bragley, "but I can't help remarking
how much the girls make OF me-
SAY" remarked Knox, don't leave
words out in that careless way
"What do you mean? What word ?"
1.-THE word FUN after much. -
Philadelphia Press.
To,,fs Wv had i,,st announced. at am
''' 'ar hen responded the courtier your
South Carolina
Herewith the mogash vas vas, eem 39 to
Maudie-I've been having a lot of fun
with Jack Communicating with him
madly. He'll propose tonight and I'll say
c5racie-Ill tell you how to get bigger
joke on him.
cracie-say yes.-Cleveland Leader.
Rivers-What have you got that string
tied around your finger for?
Brooks-By George, I'm glad you men
toned it, That's to remind me to ask you
for the flyer I lent you month ago
Chicago Tribune
II can't see why. May likes to have Reg
gle about so much"
Guess you haven't mixed with Reggie
much of late, have you"
HE'S getting real mannish. Houston
Post
Suitor-Now that I've invested my for
tune in your insurance company, I wish
to speak to you on the subject of your
daughter.
Magnate-You can't have her. You're
too careless about money matters.-Cleve-
land Leader.
.fCan you give me references from your
last nlace2'
mo. ma am The last woman worked
fur was Mrs. Lippy. that used to live next
door to you. She an couldn't get along
at all. You don't know how mean she is.
/ could tell you so many"
''You may come. Chicago Tribune.
mo matter what you undertake, you
have to begin at the bottom
"G'wan! dontl"
What is your business2"
I'm a notwithstanding Leader.