davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10
A CANDIDATES DIFFICULTIES.

Up in northern Pennsylvania a
candidate for Congress has to do
lot of hustling for votes if the stories
told by Bradford county men at their
recent dinner in New York are to he
believed. One of these stories was of
recent Congressman Mial E. Lilley,
who was willing to let the dinner
laugh at his expense.
1--WE had political contest up in
cid Bradford last fall that came pretty
close to the the speed limit, /" said he,
"and as usual I was candidate. I
tell you things were moving mighty
brisk. There were mass-meetings
every afternoon, debates in the even
ing and no end of hustling for votes
all the time among the farmers.
"Hustling being the proper thing
/ thought I'd get up before sunrise
and sound some of the farmers on the
voting question before they left their
homes for the fields and before my op-
ponent was out of bed. So up got
one morning and found one Of the
farmers whose vote was after in
his barnyard trying to milk an un-
ruly cow. He was chasing her all
abound the place with his milk pail,
but couldn't hold her and milk her
at the same time.
"That was the opportunity of my
life. jumped over the rail fence,
gabbed the obstreperous COW by the
horns and patiently wrestled with her
until my voter finished his milking.
"Then I iutimated that I'd like to
have him vote for me, but he didn't
seem to be over responsive.
+" Perhaps you've seen my oppo-
nent?'
By crackey, that reminds me-
he exclaimed, he's over behind the
barn holdin' the calf"
Assembly L. T. Horton contrib
uted this yarn about the same candi-
date:
"Mr. Lilley was driving around in
the country trying to find man
whose vote he hoped to get, but didn't
know exactly where his sman lived, so
he drove along until he came upon
little girl about IL years old who was
standing in front of farmhouse hold
ing on to rope which had calf at
the of it.
Gould you tell me where Mr..
Brown lives, little girl? 7" he asked.
"The youngster had just begun to
give the desired information when
loud female voice came from beyond
the half open door.
Mamie it said, who's that
your talking tor"
"'Mr. Lilley, ma was the an
swer.
""Well, Mamie, you just march
yourself right into this house and
Mamie, here there was a pause,
you'd better bring the calf in with
you.'
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10
LINCOLN AND THE LAKE CHAMPLAIN
QUAKER.

The people who love it will defy
you to find more beautiful lake any
where; and, anyway, if the voyagers
to the New World had discovered
nothing else, it would be worth all
the trouble they took coming over.
Big and gracious and commanding as
some dear princess, it sweeps to the
northern border, and the mountains
range themselves on either side,
watching and adoring.
The largest island in the lake is
long and wide and has several town
ships of its own. Somewhere about
1885 family of Quakers came from
the South and found the place "The
Lord" they said, "has led us into
ways of peace. Here we will live,
and the blessing of heaven will be
with us" They 1abored at their
Wholesome toll and their minds were
filed with wholesome thoughts. Sun
and storm succeeded sun and storm,
and the years passed and they found
rest until the third generation.
In 1861, when the stricken country
cried for men to save her, the note of
war came to the island, and the great
grandson of the first Quaker was
drafted.
sBut it will be no use," he said.
"I shall never fight. My mother
taught me it is a sin. tits her religion
and my fathers and their fathers. I
shall never raise my hand to kill any
one."
The recruiting officer took little
notice. "We'llsee about that later, /"
be commented carelessly.
The regiment went to Washington
and the Quaker boy drilled placidly
and shot straight. "But ! shall never
fight" he reiterated.
Word went out that there was c
traitor in the ranks. The lieutenant
conferred with the captain, and all
the forms of punishment devised for
refractory soldiers were visited on
him. He went through them with
out flinching, and there was only one
thing left. He was taken before the
colonel.
"What does this mean 7" demanded
the officer. Don't you know you
will be shot? :"
The Quaker was nice boy with
steady eyes and square chin, and he
smiled little. "That is nothing" !"
he said. "Thee didn't think I was
afraid, did thee?"
The prisoner went back to the
guard-house and the colonel went to
the President-to Lincoln--who was
great because he knew the hearts of
men. The case was put before him
of the mutinous Quaker who talked
of his religion, the soldier who refused
to fight, who de6ed pain and laughed
at the fear of death.
Lincoln listened and looked reliev-
ed. why, that is plain enough
he answered. "There is only one
thing to do. Trump up some excuse
and send him home. You can't kill
a boy like that, you know. The
country needs all her brave men
wherever they are. Send him home"
So the Quaker went back to the
island, to life and duty as he saw
them, and his children tell the story.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10
"I turned evangelist.

II Iturned evangelist. Invent down
to Kentucky to see some kim O. mine
down there, an uncle O. mine took
me to big camp-meetin' an the end
of it was that I got to be an evangelist (;
but my health broke down in Ken
lucky, an I went to Minnesoty an
started up popcorn wagon, an
done right well at it goin' round
to fairs an shows an that sort o.
thing until my usual bad luck over
took me, an one day the gas 'lene tank
l used in poppin' the corn blowed up
an set the wagon an the hull bizness
on fire at cattle show, an the last
l see o. the boss he was lightin' out
acrost Minnesoty prary with his tail
on fire, an I dunno but he's runnin'
yet. I know never saw no more of
him from that day. Bad luck seems
born with some folks
"Where are you living now?"
well, nowhar in pertickler.
Amt lived nowhar for some time. On
my way to Illinoy now to visit spell
with some kin O. mine; but dunno
as I'll stay out thare very long.
Illinoy don't suit me. Times is hard
out thar, they say. Think some of
goin' to Texas or to Mexico; but
amt ready to settle some-whar until
I look round little an see what the
chances air in different places. Many
a man has spilled his chances of sue.
cess in life by bein' too hasty about
settlin' in one place. I b'leeve in
lookin' round an maxim sure before
you leap, as the old sayin' is.
"Guess I'll meander into the smok-
er an have smoke. There a feller
in the smoker wants to talk to me
about goin' into the chicken bizness
with him in Ioway; but I tried the
chicken bizness when lived in Con-
necticut, an it don pay. Bout the
time your chicks begin to pay they
takes the pips, or the cholery breaks
out, or the hens go on a strike, an
old Debs himself couldn't argify 'em
into layin' with aigs at forty cents
dozen. There's some out in ev'ry
bizzness. But I'll go an buzz the
the man awhile. It'll help to pass
away the time. So long"
And he meandered into the smok-
ing car. With a clay pipe in one
hand and bag of tobacco in the 9TH
er, his hat on the back of his head,
and satisfied look spread over his
face, he was rolling stone bound for
for "Nowhar. ."-Mo,yls Wade in ".
Y. Tribune.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10

"Well, I got the minin' in fever at
time O. the Leadville craze, an I
went out there from Kansas in '7o
long fore the railroad struck the
cussed place. was there in the
boom days, an staked out claim
that worked on hull week an sold
it for shotgun an a bull-pup, an
the man 1 sold it to struck it rich in
that claim three days after I sold it to
him an sold a half intrust in it for
$4,000. Want that enough to jar
feller? An the bull pup died on
me bofore week, and the gun was
no good. Some folks never have no
luck. Minin' is as uncertain as rails
in oranges in Floridy. Ever try
that?"
''No."
"No."
"Take my advice, an let it alone.
An uncle O. mine died an left me ST.
500 dollars, an lit out for Floridy
to make my pile in oranges. Paid
thousand dollars for some trees the
man swore would bring me in three
thousand the first year, an what you
reckon happenedl"
st have no idea"
'In less than forty-eight hours af-
the deeds was passed up come big
freeze, an couldn't of sold the hull
grove for ten dollars. The very name
of fFloridy is stencil in my nostrils,
as the Good Book says. Igot so plum
disgusted come right back north an
enlisted an went out to the Phillip
pines. Ever been out there? :"
"No."
"You don't want to go. Of all the
Godforsaken places on top O. the
created earth that is the worst /
counted it blessin' when I got
bullet in me so 1 got sent back to the
United States. I'd ruther cart gar
bage in old St. 10, Missoury, than be
Guv-nor of the hull Philippines 1t
was hotter than roundin' up bunch
O. ten or twenty thousand Texas steers
on the plain O. Nebrasky in August.
Ever try job O. that kind 7"
"Never did,"
IT cow-boyed it three months, an
that was all wanted of it. I liked
joke as we'll the next man, but
when it comes to havin' eight or ten
O. them cowboys shootin' at you
just to see how nigh they cold come
to hittin' you, an then to have 'em
hold you down in waterin' trough
while others pumped cold water all
over you, an to have 'em wind up
by tyin' you onto buckin' bronco,
an then say they was Just foolin',
was leetle too much, and / got out
o. that camp between two days an
what you reckon done next?"
tGT -, c,.~o r d0s,if &uou, ,,
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10
PRESIDENTS IN RETIREMENT.

Only ten men who have held the
Office of President reached or surpassed
Mr.. Cleveland's present age of 90 +;
only six exceeded it by SO much as
ten years, and none exceeded it by
quite twenty years. Only ten
Presidents have survived their retire
ments from Office longer than Mr..
Cleveland, and four of these lived to
great age.
Washington, who survived his re-
tirement less than three years, thought
himself an old man when he was first
made President at the age of 81.
John Adams survived his retirement
quarter of century, and his son,
John Quincy, who outlived his retire
ment nearly twenty years, was the
only President who had nearly as
conspicuous public career after oc-
cupying the Presidency as before.
Monroe's six years after his retire
ment from Office were passed in COM
parative obscurity as resident of
this city, and his dying hours were
embittered by scandalous accusations
in connection with Jackson's seizure
of Spanish forts in Florida during the
first Seminole war. 81
Polk outlived his retirement less
than year, and there is every rea-
son to suppose that had Arthur COM
passed his ambition of an election to
the Presidency in 1884 he would have
died early in his term, for he outlived
his retirement less than two years.
Tyler, who outlived retirement
twenty years emerged from obscurity
near the end of his life opreside over
the vain Peace Convention on the eve
of the civil war. He afterward served
in the Congress of the Confederate
States.
Buchanan lived more than 7 years
after his retirement and took the op-
portunity to write what was in effect
a defence of his administration.
Jefferson and Jackson were the
only Presidents who exercised really
powerful influence over party coun-
cils after their permanent retirement
from public Office, though Van Buren
was an active politician as, long as he
had hope of denomination at the hands
of any party.
johnson was the only retired Presi-
dent to enter the United States Sen
ate, and the younger Adams was the
only one to serve in the House OF
Representatives.
Cleveland and Harrison have been
the only retired Presidents to be con-
spicuously successful in private busi-
ness. 1t is not generally known that
Mr.. Cleveland still serves as corsult-
ing counsel in lawcases, in which his
experience in the Office of President
may be supposed to have given him
special qualifications as an adviser.
His fees in such cases are large, as
were those of Mr.. Harrison as legal
adviser and a lecturer on constitu-
tional law.-New York San.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10
A NAN FROM "EowHAR. "

He was shabby, far from tidy, and
he had shifty eye. His sallow face
was characterless, and his one bulging
cheek gave evidence of huge pieceof
tobacco which he presently removed
and taking plug from the hippocket
of his shabby trousers he cut off a
piece to replace the one taken from
his mouth.
Then he generously offered the plug
to the man in the seat behind him and
said
"Have a chaw ?''
mo, thank you."
"Don't chaw p
"No."
Smoker"
mo"
Sensible, b'gosh! bet you I've
chawed an smoked up the price of a
good farm we'll stocked. Begun when
l was eight years old ard have KEEP
it up until it's got to be necessity
with me. You live back there where
you got on?"
"YeS."
Looked like nice kind of a
place. I've an idee 1 d like it around
there. Livin' purity cheap?"
Reasonably so.
"I'm on my way home from Da-
koty because of the high cost of liv-
in out there. Folks lied to me, or
I'd never went out there from Mis-
soury where I lived most a year.
Liked it real we'll in Missoury until I
come down with fever an ager.
Ever live in Calafornyl"
"No."
"It's the biggest lied-about coun-
try / ever struck. They'lltella about
the roses climbin' all over the win
ders of the houses in the winter time
an all that; but body can't live on
roses nor sand an wind either, an
you pay just as much for oranges
there as you do any place. Iprefer
Arizony to Californy. Ever been in
Arizony?"
''Never."
"It has its good p'ints but talk
about her weather-sufferin Moses |!
The thermometer rises until the mer-
kerry threatens to rnn out at the top
an in the winter time it threatens to
run out at the bottom. Cold By
Jacks! I never saw anything to
equal it except in in the Klondike.
Didn't git the Klondike craze, did
you."
"No."
"Well, 1 did, more fool me / I was
one o. the first men into Dawson City
an one o. the first out. No Klon-
dixie for me! It's no place for pore
cuss. You hear o. this man an that
comm out with million or so in dust
but you don't hear o. the hundred
that come out with less nor they lug
ged into the place. This minin' bus
mess amt what it's cracked up to be.
Ever do any minin' in Colorado? 7"
"Never."
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10
For "THE UNION"
AN OCEAN SHELL.


BY EDWIN HIGGINS.
Eternal songs their vigils keep,
Ger bosom Of the mighty deep,
On crested waves they rise and swell,
From roseate lips of ocean shell.
Softer than chimes of vesper bell,
Is the music Of the ocean shell,
Singing ft makes the darkness light.
For 1t ne'er sleeps by day nor night.
In calm or storm, on land or sea.
There's music in the shell for me.
D. beauteous shell come to me. tell
What thoughts within thy bosom dwell?
I place thee to my list'ning ear;
hear that God Is ever near;
lay thee on my yearning heart.
/ know His love will ne'er depart.
List every wave and ocean shell,
And all that In the ocean dwell.
Lift ceaseless anthems Lord to Thee,
Ruler Of earth and sky and sea.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10

A woman met lately said she was
bordering on nervous prostration from
the fact that she had been going, 60
ing socially for many months, until
she was nearly gone ! Why will peo-
pie, otherwise supposed to be pos
sessed of ordinary common sense,
keep up the long and wearing society
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10

SHE-"I heard of woman who
ouarreled with her husband FIVE years
ago and hasn't spoken to him since"
He-"I know of worse cases than
that. l know of women who quar-
relied with their husbands FIVE years
ago and have not stopped jawing
them vet" )"
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10

Mr.. JoNEs-I didn't marry your
whole family-I only married you.
Mrs. Jones-Of course, dear. I
was the only fool in the family.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10

SMALL BoY-''Ma, pass the bread. "
Mother (rather sternly)-"1f what,
my son?'.
Small Boy (smartly)-"If you kin
reach it,
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10

THE MAN with the tireless jaw
was soliciting contributions for some
kind of foreign mission.
"What do you want to bother about
the heathen for?' queried the man
with the double chin. aren't they
happy and content :"
"That's just it, replied the other.
"The fact that they are happy and
content is proof of their uncivilized
state"
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10

WHEN A woman begins to watch at
tentively mans acts, gestures and
speech, you may be sure she has be-
gun either to love or to hate him.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10

whirl business? Yes, they go, and
they go, and yet entertain you with the
alarming strain they are under and the
fashion columns in the newspapers
recite how much Mrs. Blank and Miss
Dash feel because they will be COM
PEELED to give up their social duties
and accept no more invitations, owing
to the serious inroads made upon their
health, &c., &c. Poor deluded souls +!
Between their dress-makers and their
dinners, and their daughters, the
married hostesses are really in a sad
way. Several ladies have tainted at
the dinner of several others lately. as
we'll as at their own, and list of sub
stitutes is kept to fill the places of
those invited and who cannot appear.
What a mockery of real enjoyable
hospitality all this is. And at the
end of the season the ennui, the dis-
content, the jealousies, cannot be
counted. .Of course, it may be pos
sible that daughteror two may have
become engaged, and wedding may
be seen mistily on the horizon of the
future, when society will rise up
again and join in the procession, ded-
icated to show, blow mammon.
Such is life in many circles where the
gilded fools occupy the high places
looking down pity on the less (to
them fortunate.
Why there are so may things girl
can do, even when society claims
her, as she reconciles that fact, more
than ever, I should say If we can
not get work to do, we can make it.
Encourage our less fortunate sisters
by joining the industrial societies and
unions in their behalf. Go into
the hospitals, the old folks homes,
charity bureaus, flower and ice mis-
sions. Do good wherever you can.
Make a personal interest society,
even if you only take up one family,
and by your real sincerity of heart and
sympatbizing of spirit, you can help
them wonderfully. Enter into their
everyday life and interest, suggest
ing and encouraging. There is no
acme of pleasure higher than that Of
being of assistance to others, and be-
coming an entering wedge for good in
their lives and purposes, and con-
tributing to their pleasures. Girls
can organize reading circle or club,
can get some study out of such and
much instructive entertainment. IA
Young Peoples Reading Circle"
started in Indiana, few years ago,
with ten members, has now on its
roll 1874 900 members of both sexes.
Think of that.-"Aunt Io," in Ne0O-
town pa. Enterprise.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10

AN ALL round wag placed the fol-
lowing placard over his coal bin :
"Not to be used except in case of
fire."
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10

A MARRIED man always looks fool
ish when you ask him how he pro-
posed.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10

"You DON'T agree, then, that See
ing is believing?'"
"Not much !! I see some people
everv day that never could believe. +"
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10
For "THE UNION"
TWILIGHT.
By FLORA STEWART EMORY.

The day and myself are aweary, dear,
We long for our lover, the night;
We languidly sigh as we feel him near,
And turn from our master, the light.
The light is 80 clear and so full of trials,
His duties so manifold great;
But our lover, the night, lures US on with his
smiles
We're SO glad it is getting late.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10

SCENE: The Wilson's dining-room.
Norah, the slovenly cook, puts her
head in at the door.
Norah-"Plaze, nam, will ye be
afther tellin' me whin I'm to know
whether tn puddin's baked or not 7"
Mrs. Wilson-"Stick a knife into
the middle of it, and if the knife comes
out clean the pudding is ready to send
to the table"
Mr.. Wilson-"And Norah, if it
does come out clean, stick all the rest
of the knives in the house into the
pudding"
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10
HOW TO STAY YOUNG.

How old are you? The adage says
that women are as old as they look
and men as old as they feel. That's
wrong. A man and woman are as
old as they think themselves to be.
Growing old is largely a habit of
the mind. GAS man thinketh in
his heart SO is he." If he begins
shortly after middle age to imagine
himself growing old he will be old.
To keep ones self from decrepti-
tude is somewhat a matter of will
power. The fates are kind to the
man who hangs on to life with both
hands. He who lets go will go.
Death is slow only to tackle the tena-
cious.
Ponce de Leon searched in the
wrong place for the fountain of youth.
1t is in ones self. One must keep
ones self young inside. So that
while "the other man perisheth the
inner man is renewed day by day."
When the human mind ceases to
exert itself, when there is no longer
an active interest in the affairs of this
life, when the man stops reading and
thinking and doing, the man, like a
blasted tree, begins to die at the top.
You are as old as you think you
are. Keep the harness on. Your
Job is not done.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10

"I am sure 1 don't know
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1905-06-10
CHAT WITH GIRLS ABOUT THIS, THAT AND
THE OTHER.

We're 50 glad it is getting late.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-22
WALL STREET REVIEW
ANOTHER DAx oE PnoAp AND ACTIVE
Ds'irs ss .ei,:s fs:s s sss Ad
 M0vemeote h the Price

New York. Nov 21.--This was another day Ssas gsss ss t . and Of n s M sa attraetsd by the rise in prices of the last But t was obvious also that . liberal dis tribution of holdings was going on to take sc;ysnta:ss os sss ErcMih q pssss;s The cured offer such hendsome profits in many essss that shs indgcsment to rsslisss s ssa se.%s ss'&is iessssisr 's ssa E: ' ssss:a sy sss esess s:Eins Spsn .Ss M 2. stocks save the imprsssiea nc Of some positivs
 ths sS. sslS: VI. riisss x. sSss Line. The action of that stock proved that m S. % f bss ,ss <. Ssa came Ss Ssa ssss fffS s S esr sss
 sohs asess sns r.iwass sna dustrial stocks, which has been large sus- suppissnentsry Influence in the same grcup was an emphatic disclaimer from off ger. ger of the sonthern iron and steel companies was in contemplation. The cheek to the of ,n %o. as Sas were abundant offsstfinx influences. The most sconspicuous was amongst the stocks centering about the metal. mine and smeit-
 Yesterdsy's increase in the dividend by sn GsSs sns Hsss ,Ss Sa.y wa5 msK. S ap % ts. proaDct 70 ' of these companies. ss- ssii Sssiy IHRs stRPsensthsnns & % influsnce. Besides | that there were constant rumors aflost Of
 wssaS Ss for fuasr thu of the day was the sharp advances in the common stocks have already enjoyed wide gains
 scription privilsses for the 25,ooo,Oo oi
 ionr @s woud Ss iong There was % sn9tnsr stage In h the osi- sd-
 sst ss prosrsss na. s to the oaas | is believed. will not be payable until some time next year. except for small preliminary
 Sterling exchange declined in this market but New York exchange at Chicago drop premiSn pro @ yesterday. and views of the % return UT flow of currency to New York were modifi-
 stock. TS rs: .a
 nns hs ss eson s amongst the bears on the cotton exchange The Irregular tone of the latter market wal
 ssrea s the ana 0sat sddns up last prices in many instances were below those of last night:
 ss.s2o.ooo. United States new 4s declined Aywxv vouxr e,r<r,r