The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1905-05-18
CIVIL SERVICE.


of our great American humorists
have not taken as the subject of a
volume the ridiculous system of
making our civil appointments.
What a deliciously humorous idea
it is that this government must
have a commission on the educa-
tional fitness of it's employees when
the commissioners who pass upon
the matter themselves are appointed
without any examination whatever
as to their educational qualifications
for their positions! There are
civil service commissioners serving
at the present time who could not
pass an ordinary civil service ex-
animation.
What delightfully."- absurd posi-
ton for one to claim that clerks
and letter carriers in first and
second class post offices must be
selected out of and after a scholastic
competitive examination conducted
along the strictest lines when the
postmaster who has charge of them
all may be the biggest chump in
town and no test is applied to find
out his qualifications. What can
be more incongruous than to assert
that it is absolutely essential for
the 'sgood of the service" that all
subOrdinates in a bureau must be
rigidly examined in order that men
may be selected who can capably
perform ordinary routine duties
when the man under whose regula-
tions they perform these duties and
whose orders and directions they
are compelled to follow is exempt
from all examinations? One might
as we'll assert that it is necessary
for angels to possess more know
ledge than the Almighty in order
that heaven should be conducted
on correct principles.
What can be more hilariously
funny than the idea that clerks,
elevator men, persons who wrap
books, must demonstrate their
intellectual and educational supe.i-
ority over their competitors for
the same positions by undergoing
a severe examination while there is
nothing in the world to prevent
man who cannot read and write
from being selected as one of the
lawmakers of the nation?
Three-fourths of the senators and
members of Congress could not
make an average of 70 per cent in
the examination required of de-
partment clerks. Take for example
Uncle Joe Cannon of Illinois,
present speaker of the House, an
ideal Congressman, / doubt if he
is right sure whether Washington
crossed the Delaware or the Della
ware crossed Washington. No
doubt he is little hazy on the
point as to whether the Brandywine
was conflict between English and
American armies or a drinking
bout between Yankees and British
ers with brandy and wine for
liquids. His handwriting looks
like that of a schoolboy, traced
with the wrong end of the pen
holder. In debate he murders the
kings English while he nails his
opponent to the cross. l don't
believe he could, to save his life.
locate the gulf of Ashantee or name
the rivers of New England that
flow into the Atlantic ocean, and
if asked the distance from Earth
to Jupiter he would probably
answer that he did not come from
Danville to Washington that way.
About the only scholastic test that
he could pass with credit would
be in figures.
If he was to attempt a civil
service examination his record
would appear something like this:
Reading. -. .62
Orthography... $500. ..52
Writing. -. ..ls
hIbtoiy ". ......... III
Geography. 30