davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1905-05-20
The Lunch coun-
ter Stoop.

IT am not sur
prised the doc
tors have discov-
cred that thelunch
counter habit has
brought in a Pc
culiar hump on
the shoulders"
"W ell, what more
does it show than
that where men
are bent on eat
ing they incline to
eat?"
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1905-05-20
thoughtful.

NO." she de-
clared. II will new
err marry any man
who hasn't grit
enough. to go and
ask papa for me-.
That's all right.
but you must re-
member that your
father has a weak
heart, and sudden
joy has often been
known to prove
+ a t a | in s u c h
cases."
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1905-05-20
Strapped.

II remember yet
how when I mis-
behaved my moth
er used to strap
me to a bedpost."
when I misbe-
haved my father
used to strap me
to a finish"
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1905-05-20
InHsxibIe Justice.

InHexible Justice.
what kind Of a
man is Jenkins ~
"He's this kind:
II you invited him
to dine with you
and he lost his
umbrella at your
house he'd make
you pay for it,"
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1905-05-20
Sensible Young.
sfO.

stC.
Old Mr.. Silliboy
Every fond of the
kids) Goo, goo,
and where was
uns ickle popsy
pinklumwopsy go
ing? Goo, goo!
Pity tickle sing.
Modern Young
ster-What do you
think is the exact
nature of the old
gentlenan's COM
plant, mother?
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1905-05-20
Refused.

Refused.
"Let me sell you
this book of war
stories"
II don't care for
| scrapbooks."
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1905-05-20
Her Answer,

"Oh, I want you
to marry me, don't
you know" said
the exquisite to
the plain girl.
ooh, yes, I no."
she responded and
had to write it out
for him SO he
could get the full
force of her reply.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1905-05-20
More Bad Luck.

Moro Bad Luck.
people are al
ways giving me
too much change
by mistake"
well, doesn't It
make you cheer
full 2"
mo; I am so
blame ed on est
that I have to
give 1t back
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1905-05-20
Perfect Art.


"That making an
artificial eye for
a pug dog was
quite a feat in OPP
teal science"
ut was. I I'M
derstand it was so
natural even the
beast itself could
not see through
the d deception"
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1905-05-20
Market Steady.

Virginia = May
has been in the
market for a long
time.
Clara-Yes, but
she is still quoted
at ~.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1905-05-20
His Only objec.
ton.
AnpreIoensive,

Apprehensive.
Father, a few
thousand dollars
will start me in
business"
Eyes, but how do
I know that /
won't have to pay
out all I'm worth
to stop you?"
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1905-05-20

Whats the new
Illustration 2"
"W h y, e cry
time he alludes to
the twentieth CEN
fury he calls it
old twenty cent !"
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1905-05-20
Familiarity and
Slang.

"Bighead has an
extensively famil-
lar way about
him"
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1905-05-20
Easy to "strins."


Grace Il never
knew a girl so
susceptible to fat
terry as Gladys.
Helen - That's
right. Jack told
her she was an an
gel, and she went
right off and be-
gan taking lessons
on the harp.
His Only objec-
ton.
Mrs. Bricabrac
"A n d W hta t is
your objection to
buying a piano for
Muriel?
Bricabrac-I am
afraid she might
want to play it.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1905-05-20
Why She Lost
Him,

Fred - And you
mean to tell me
that Jack Hipkins
has hot married
Miss Payn? Why,
the girl was just
throwing herself
at him the last
time I saw them.
Ted - My dear
chap, did you ever
know a woman
who could throw
straight?
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18
The Infallible Hands.

A lady, who had been three or four
years away from her childhood's home
and settled in one of her own, was
taken seriously i'll. Her mother, with
all a mothers solicitude, was anxious
to be with her daughter at once, and
hastened to her bedside. She found
skilful physicians in attendance and Il
trained nurse in charge; there was
really nothing for her to do-nothing
that she could be permitted to do. Day
after day she made brief, silent visits
to the sick room, even her presence
could not be allowed long, and went
away powerless to aid. The minister
ing was in wiser, more efficient hands
than hers, and she could not be trusted
with it-would not have dared to trust
herself with it.
"But it seems strange" she said
sadly one day, that even I, her mother,
can only stand aside Gnd do nothing.
There never before was time when
mother wasn't the one to help and
comfort: it seems as IL it ought to be so
still. and yet would be afraid to do
anything but keep hands off and trust
to q knowledge and strength that is
greater than my own"
1t is the same in many spiritual
crisis through which we see our dear
ones pass. We long to shift the bur-
den. to tighten the trials, to bestow the
coveted gift; but the Great Physician
holds the precious soul in His hands,
the hands that will make no mistake,
and We can only stand aside and trust
Him -
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18
60 -: - y
The Late LnrI Angels y.

The death cf the MARQUIS Of Ang:a'
sey, which will be regretted by many
otho: persons than his creditors, re-
calls in some particulars the passing
away. of the fourth and last Marquis
Of Hastings. Lord Ang!csey lived f"ur
years longer than Lord Hastings, VINO
died at the as, of twenty-six. Lore
Hastings was much younger than that
when he made his first public appear.
ance-in a police court, to be fined for
cockfghting. Each married lady OF
his own blood. Lady Florence Pagets
elopement with her cousin, Lord Hast
ings, was nine days wonder, and,
after his death and her marriage with
Sir George Chetwynd, she became the
mother Of Miss Florence Paget Chet'
wynd, who is Lord Anglesey's widow
It is a curious coincidence which has
made one and the same lady the wife
in one case, and in the other the
mother-in-law, of the two greatest
spendthrifts among Marquises.-Lon'
don Chronicle.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18

Many women long for child to bless
their homes, but because Of some de-
bility or displacement Of the female
organs they are barren.
Preparation for healthy maternity is
accomplished by Lydia E. Pinkham's
Vegetable Compound more successfully
IN by any other medicine, because 1t
Aves tone and strength to the entire
Female organism, curing all displace-
Iments, liberation and Inflammation.
A woman who is in good physical
blessings of q good constitution. Is
not that an incentive to prepare for a
healthy maternity?
If expectant mothers would fortify
themselves with Lydia E. Pinkham's
Vegetable Compound, which for thirty
years has sustained thousands OF
women in this condition. there would
be great decrease in miscarriages, in
suffering. and in disappointments at
birth.
The following letters to Mrs. Pink
ham demonstrate the power of Lydia
E. Pirkham's Vegetable Compound in
such cases.
Mrs. L. C. Glover, Vice-President of
Milwaukee Business Woman's Associa-
ton, of 614 Grove Street, Milwaukee,
Wis, writes:
Dear Mrs Pinkham:-
~ was married for several years and no
children blessed our home The doctor said
had complication Of female troubles and
could not have any children unless could
be cured. For months took his medicines,
trying in vain for q cure, but at last my hus-
band became disguised and suggested that
Many Wsmen Have Been Beuefftod b!
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18
Road Climbs Hill For You.

A rolling road. like the moving stair
cases that are being used in some de-
partment stores now, has been installed
at Cleveland. In that city most OF the
freight houses are situated along the
Cuyahoga River, sixty-five feet below
the level of the city, and it is difficult
for horses with heavy loads to make
the ascent, requiring thirty minutes to
an hour to reach the top. The rolling
road consists of an endless belt some
what like a plank walk, rolling over
large pulleys at each end of the ascent.
1t runs on some 400 small interHediate
wheels to reduce the friction. Wagons
drive on at the bottom and in few
minutes are at the top. The road runs
at the rate of three miles an hour,
driven by powerful electric motors.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18
Lent to tho Lord.

The Rev. George Gilfillan, the emil.
nent divine, was distinguished for his
generosity and largeness Of heart. On
one occasion he met member of his
church whom he had not seen at wor'
ship for long time. Reminding him
of the fact, the minister asked what
was wrong.
Il did not like to come in coat l
am ashamed Oft is so BARE" an
Swered the man.
The minister instantly divested him
self of his own coat, and handed it
to his distressed parishioner.
There, my man, let me see my coat
every Sunday until it becomes bare,
and then call back"
The worthy divine then returned to
his studies in his shirt sleeves; and his
wife, observing him, asked what he
had done with his coat.
Il have just lent it to the Lord.' was
Gilfllan's noble answer.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18
instruments Of God.

Evan Roberts, the miner Of only
twenty-six years of age. whom God
has been using so wonderfully in what
has come to be known as the welsh
Revival" is man Of great simplicity
and modesty. At one large meeting
he went out because the expectancy
and curiosity had become too great.
That meeting proved to be one of the
most nightly influential gatherings
of any held in the region. When Mr..
Roberts left, young girl rose, and, as
if inspired, demanded of the people:
Whom are you after, Evan Roberts, or
Jesus Christi"
Who, after all, is Paul, or Peter, or
Apollos, or Augustine, or Luther, or
Wesley, or Moody, or Evan Roberts.
but minister by whom men believe?
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18

try Lydia e. Pinkhams Vegetable Cdu.
pound; this did, and improved steadily =
health, and in less than two years beoutfa1
child came to bless our home. Now We have
something to live for, and all the credit =
due to Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Com
Mrs. Mae P. wharry. Secretary a
the North Shore Oratorical Society,"
The Norman, Milwaukee, Wis, writeA
Dear Mrs. Pinkham:-
| ~ was married for five years and gsyD
birth to two premature children. Lydia K
Pinkham's Vegetable Compound was recon-
mended to me, and am so glad took II, fnr
| il changed me from q weak, nervous woman
to strong, happy and healthy one within
seven months. Within two years lovely
little girl was born. which Is the pride and
Joy Of our household. Every day I bleS
the light, health and happiness 1t brought -
our home
If any woman thinks she is sterile,
or has doubts about her ability to carry
child to mature birth let her write
to Mrs Pinkham, Lynn, Mass, whose
advice is free to all expectant or
would-be mothers. She has helped
thousands of women through this anE-
ious period
Women suffering with irregular q
painful menstruation leucorrhea. dis
placement liberation or inhammatio0
Of the womb. that bearing down feel
ing or ovarian trouble. backache, bloat-
ing or nervous prostration, should re-
member that Lydia E. Pinkhams Vege-
table Compound holds the record for,
the greatest number Of actual cures
of woman's ills, and accept no subst-
tute.
nse ns.Lhs.Is kAxIce ;srA RaIRe8a
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18
tho Now World nrIns sinle appeared. Tne

the New World principle appeared. The
medieval ages ended, the modern be-
gan. The worst stage Of religious
nightmare was lifted from the MIND
and conscience of mankind. Yet think
of what might have been. Think what
might have been. had mediaevalism
triumphed! Think what might have
been. had dogmas silenced reason.
Think what might have been. had the
absolutism Of the church and the Old
World principle continued supreme!
Let him who easily forgets think
what might have been. Manhood suf-
frage and manhood religion are not
ideals of mediaevalism. They are
ideals of freemen. wrung from tyranny
and paid for with great price. Only
the man who forgets. values rs small
thing our heritage Of religious liberty.
Only the man who forgets is indifferent
to religious progress. Only the man
who forgets can receive unmoved the
suggestion of q revival Of a dogmatic
faith and an ecclesiastical abSolutism
which ever has meant bondage, ignor-
ance, superstition. fear, and stagnation.
Only the man who forgetS can be mis-
led by the mockery of form or the
uuackery Of belief. Only the man who
forgets can deny the logic Of the new
learning or turn his back on reason and
experience, his face toward the past.
AS truth is above price, as liberty is
worth its cost. as freedom is precious
to every man, urge on this generation
that it forget not, neither be Indifferent
to religious progress. In the name OF
freedom, in the name Of truth, / plead
for manhood religion, for the simple
truth. for the honest thought. for the
supremacy Of character. plead for
the modern learning, which emanci-
pates the world, which crowns every
man a king and anoints every man a
priest. I plead for the modern living.
sane and gladstone and wholesome. l
plead for the modern age, splendid in
achievement, rich in promise. l plead
for modern man, who has come so far
and done so much. 1 plead for the
modern religious idea whose support
is the truth that makes men free
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18

Making railroad rates Is like playing
q game of checkers OF chess. Com
munities to be benefited, producers.
manufacturers or shippers to be aided
represent the pieces used. Every posi-
bic move is studied for It's effect on the
general result by skilled traffic mana
gers. A false move in the making OF
freight rates may mean the ruin OF
city, of great manufacturing interest,
of an agricultural community. Rail-
roads strive to build up all these so
that each may have IN equal chance III
the sharp competitio1nOf business. So
sensitive to this riva y are the rail-
roads that in order 20 lild UP business
along their lines they Nequently allow
the shipper to practically dictate rates.
Rate making has been d batter of de-
yelopment; of mutual concessions for
mutual benefit. ThN is why the rail-
roads Of the United States have volun-
tarily made freight rates so much lower
in this country than they are on the
soyernment-owned and operated rail
ways of Europe and Australia that
they are now the lowest transportation
rates in the world
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18
Tine Flies.

A small boy who was waiting with
his mother in q twelve-story Office
building on Chestnut street the other
day, watched with fascination an indi.
Gator which showed, by a pointing
hand on a dial, where the mounting
car was. Mamma" lie said, NOW
know why everybody here hurries So
Just look how fast that clock goes!-
PHILADELPHIA Record.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18
sRoUGHT DOWN A BUTTERFLY
Remarkable Shot Made With Revolver
on Board Ship.


In the British museum is a rare
butterfly, which was obtained in a
rost unusual way. Probably no 9th
sr butterfly in any collection in the
world was taken in the same manner.
On the steamship bound to Sydney,
New South Wales. several men were
amusing themselves by shooting at a
mark with a revolver. Just as one
nan was about to shoot, he noticed
remarkably large butterfly fiutter-
ng toward the snip. When it hovered
above the deck he fired and actually
managed to hit it,
The insect fell to the deck, consid-
erably mangled. The creature was
% beautiful, even in its mutilated con-
jition. that the pieces were carefully
collected and finally they reached a
British entomologist. who found that
t was specimen Of an entirely new
species, never before seen by the
scientific world.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18
Clever Politics.

The chairman Of political meeting
In the North in the course of his speech
said "Our opponent is one of the c!ev'
crest and most unscrupulous politicians
In this country; but, thank goodness,
gentlemen, our candidate is well able
to beat him on his own ground" The
candidate was present.-London Punch.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18
How'a This:

We sffer One Hundred Dollars Rewarito:
snycase OF Catarrn that canno. be cured By
halls Catarrh Cure.
III. CRESES & Co., Toledo, o.
We, the undersigned, have known F. J.
Cheney Tor the last l6years, and belieyehin
perfectly honorable in all business transac
lions and financially able to carry out aay
obligations made by their Arm.
NEST & TRUAx, Wholesale Druggists, To-
ledo, y,
WALDlNo, kISSAS Il MARVIN, Wholesals
Druggists, Toledo, o.
Halls Catarrl Cureis taken internally, az
ilgdirectly upon the blood aud mucoussur-
faces OF the system. Testimonials sen: free.
Price, 75c. per bottle. Sold by all Druggists
Take Halls Family Pills for constipation n
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18
Gods Doing.

It is not by regretting what is ir-
reparable that true work is to be done,
but by making the best Of what we
are. 1t is not by complaining that
we have not the right tools, but by
using we'll the tools we have. What
we are, and where We are. is Gods
providential arrangement-God's do
ing, though it may be mans misdo-
ing.-F. W. Robertson. >;,.y
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18

were very irregular, dark colored and
full of sediment. The Pills Cleared it
all up and l have not had an ache in
my back since taking the last dose.
NV health generally is improved
great deal"
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, n. Y.
For sale by all dealers, price 80 cents
per box.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18
Class Holds Many Reunions.

Few high school classes can boast
of having reunions for twelve sue
cessive years after graduation. but
that is the record Of the class OF 1893
Of Rockland, Me-, high school. Its
latest reunion was held Jan. IA at
the home of two classmates in Lynn,
and ten members of the class were
present
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18
Botanic Blood Balm for the Blood,

bot1nic bIoou bRIln TOT the bIo0ds
Ifyou suffer from ulcers, eczema, scrofuls,
blood poison, cancer, eating sores, itching
skin, pimples, boils bone pains. swellings,
rheumatism, catarrh, or any blood or skin
disease. we advise you tofake Botanic Blood
Balm (B. B. b. Especially recommended
for old, obstinate. deep-seated cases, cures
where sll else fails, heals every sore, makes
the blood pure and rich, gives the skin the
rich glow Of health. Druggists, 81 per
large bottle, 8 bottles s2.50, bottles $500,
express prepaid. Sample sent free by writing
Blood Balm Co., Atlanta, GA. Describe
trouble and free medical advice sent In
sealed letter. Medicine sent st once, pre-
paid
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18
Spiritual Life.

Hush thy complaints. Sweetness and
kindness are good when they bear thee
home to God. Cruelty and wrong are
good when they force thee to the bosom
of God. Evil is evil unto him who
doeth evil, but evil is good to thee If
it unites thee with God the Beautiful
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18
aFran. Hous. 100 Years Old.

A frame house can be kept in good order
for a hundred years, if painted with the
Longman l. Martinez J.. & NJ. Paint. 1t
won't need to be painted more than once
in ten to fifteen years because the l.. & NJ:
Zinc hardens the L. & Nj. White Lead, and
gives it enormous life.
Four gallons Longman L Martinez L. 4
NJ. Paint mixed with three gallons linseed
oil will paint house.
w. B. Barr, Charleston. w. Va, writes:
"Painted Frankenburg Block with l. r
NJ; stands out as though vanished"
Wears and covers like gold.
Sold everywhere and by Longman 4
MARTINEZ. New York. Paint Makers for
Fifty Years.
The lighthouse at Corunna, Spain, is the
o'deSt now in use
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18
Schiller. Fathers Wish.

Apropos Of the Friedrich Schiller
centenary it is interesting to recall
that when the news Of the birth OF the
poet reached his father, the latter be-
sought God to bestow upon the boy
"those gifts of mind and soul to which
lie himself. through lack Of education,
had never attained"
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18
The Little Orphan Home.

Mrs. Sego, one OF the trustees Of the New
Orleans Orphan Home, gives DR.. Biggers'
Huckleberry Cordial for the relief OF all
bowel troubles. She never suffers herself
to be without it.
Sold by oil Druggists, 25 and Soc bottle.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18

"Doan's Kidney
Pills proved q
very efficient
remedy in my
ca Sc. I used
them for disor-
dered kidneys
and backachc,
from which !
had experienced
q great deal of
trouble and
pain. The kid
ney secretions
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18

FITSnermanontlyc cured. Motifs or nervous
nessafte first days use OF DR.. Kline's Great
NerveRestorer, s2trialbottle and treatise free
DR.. Il. II. KLINE. Ltd ,931 Arch ST., Phila., Pa.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18

Two or three weeks ago U. s. Grant
bought for 100000 a church building
and lot in Los Angeles. Last week he
sold the property for $150,000.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18

Mrs. Wins slows Soothing Syrup for children
ieethinc soften the gums. reduces iniamms-
tioG ,a!ays pain cures wind collie Csc. bottle.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18

The Pope-hartford and PcpeIribune
gasoline cars and runabouts meet the spe-
ciiic demands OF large class OF automobile
users. They are simple in construction.
Tree from complication AMI efficient. Prices
from $3.50 to $1,000. For finely illustrated
catalogues and descriptive matter. ad.
dress Dept. A. Pope Manufacturing Co..
Hartford. Conn.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18

I am sure Piso's Cure for Consumption saved
my lie three years aCo.-Mrs. THOMAS Rob-
EETs, Maple St.. Norwich, MY, Feb. II 1900
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18

The British Admiralty has just made its
first dental appointment.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18
CkPX GRAHAM's CURE
Sores on Face and Back-Tried Many
Doctors without Success-Gives
Thanks to Cuticurn

Captain W. S. Graham, 1921 Eof St..
Wheeling, w. Va, writing under date OF
June IA. '04. says: Il am so grateful want
to thank God that friend recommended
Cuticura Soap and Ointment to me. l
suffered for long tine with sores on my
face and back Come doctors said | had
blood poison. and others that | had bar
bers' itch. None OF them did me any good.
but they all took my money. My friends
tell me my skin now looks as clear as a
baby's, and tell them all that Cuticura
Soap and Cuticura Ointment did it."
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-05-18

Itch cured in 30 minutes by Woolford's
Sanitary Lotion. Never rails. Sold by all
druggists. 81. Mail orders promptly filled
b. Dr. t. Detchon. Charlottesville, Ind.