The Washington times., 1905-04-30
Home Run Haggerty
OsLerizes Players
Movement to Drop All Over Forty and
Choroform Those Over Sixty in the
Corndroppers' League.

sleep. You drop off without KNOWN
what hit you or nothin' about it,
''ThatH he nice for Neely,' says I.
McGinnis don't give him much sleep
since the Hayv1lles got into second
place"
So we went toward the ball grounds
and dropped into Doc StrickIet's drug
store on tie way. The Doc wasn't there,
SO Sam asked the clerk. q, new guy We
didn't know, for some chloroform.
What do you want It for?" says the
clerk
Sam looked s'prised "The gall O.
him." says he 10 me. Then he opened
up ON the poor shfverin' dude. an when
he go through they was a drug clerk
that looked like ne wanted to fade be-
hinG the euff't he had around his neck.
Clerk Ran Away. rs
What Sam told him. cuttfn' out the
cuss words, which was most of it, was
that he wanted to Qhloroform a guy over
sixty; that he wanted to put some iE
my beer; that he was goin' TO feed some
to the Hayvilles that afternoon; that he
usually ct a quart a day, but wanted to
see how a galIond taste, spreadin' it
on bread and butter. As I say, when he
able stunned an run away Sam is
the amateur swaaTin' champion O. the
Corndroppers'. Reggie is the p'fessionaI
champion. but that cones O havin' a
education. II Sam had had the oppor-
tunitfes Reggie's had he. ed lay it over
him. 1 don't doubt He's got more o
what you'd call a natural cussin' talent
By an fy the clerk came back ar
give Sam a black lookin' bottle an it
seemed like he'd been 1aughin' but Sam
gave him look when he handed out a
dollar William that made him very
sober. Then he went on to the ball
grounds.
Duff to Pitch.
Well. we were to play Hayville thar
day. an we found that Neely Duff was
/ in to pitch. We were late getting in !;
the other fellers had changed their
clothes an was out practisin'. an il so
happened that just as we got our
clothes on Neely rushes into the Visitin'
team dressin' room with his grip, an
I seen that the time was come. I give
Sam a meanin' glance, an he took the
bottle out OF his coat pocket.
How ID you give it?' I whispered, J,
for fear Neely'd hear me. 'Sh'u I hold
his nose?"
You don't give it down his throat, ="
says Sam. You want to leave his nose
alone, for that's how he get it, You
take a towel and make trunked hated
comb out of it. Like this''-and he
wound a towel around his hand an then
| pulled it out an left a hole in it.
What do they call it that fora
trunk hated comb?' whispers I.
j 'Caase it puts him into coma-don t
you see2" says Sam.
| But what's trunk hated got To-
"Sh-sh-sh.'' Sam shook his finger an
we walks in on NeeIy. He was putin
| on his shirt.
1T havin' been decided that all guys
over sixty has got to be chloroformed. -
/ says Sam, backing up agin the door,
/ lit becomes our durn unpleasant duty
/ to tell you that we've come to pull the
/ trick off"
The wot?" says Neely.
| Had to Do 1t.
"Chloroformin' you says / 1--WE got
/ to do il. Don't blame US. It's a duty t
we owe 70 ourselves an ali that man
holds dear
! Ia heard Reggie say that once, so ]
thought It a good place 10 ring IL in,
/ specially as NeeIy looked like he didn't
/ believe what we said about the choloro-
/ formin'
Are you two big mugs crazyI" says
/ Neely: ''or are you-help-'
He didn't say no more I grabbed him
quick, and the single screech he let out
before my fingers got to his throat didn I
/ sound different than what any of us
yelled right along. He was like a baby.
and in minute had him on the floor
Lego mis- windpipe SOS he kin git
this. says Merritt emptyin' half the
bottle into the towel. Then he kneeIed
down an swung it quick over Neely's
nose an mouth.
Eyes Glared.
Nicely squirmed minute an then lay
still First his eyes glared at us an then
! they looked soother an lovin' an then
they begun to smile When he tried TO
take the comb thing off Sam d only
hold it on tighter.
Hes sayin' souethin'," says I.
''TheyI all do" says Sam. He'll go
off in a minute"
/ I knelt down NeeIy's eyes was closed
Hes sayin' yum, yum says /
Sam nodded. It's havin' the effect =
| says he 1T takes hold slow on some. -
Now he says more an sayst he
mas TO lap il off'n the towel"
Give more to him." says Sam,
while l hold the comb"
Il So I grabs the bottle an was Just
goin' to doyse the towel with 1t when
II smelled il l give such a whoop