Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1905-04-30
CITY D|SCOVERER
FINDS A CROESUS

When the City Discoverer reached the
little grove where he often stopped 10 rest
while on one of lis favorite ramDies' lie
seated himself on q familiar stump re-
moved his gold-rimmed glasses ana sazeu
around, his mild blue eyes beamlng con-
tentment and goodwill Gracious, ne re-
marked aloud, but it is good to be awe
The day is simply perfect; the sun Is bright
and warm: the air is laden with the oreath
of spring and nature is in her most kindly
mood No one could be here today and
not be happy"
II beg your pardon" said oueruious
voice from behind. but that statement Is
decidedly erroneous
The Discoverer whirled around In aston
ishment. lust in time to see short elderly
Individual seat himself On a neishboring
stump and take out note book and pencil
why did you make such an idiouc state
ment as that?" inquired the stranger In an
irritated tone, as he ran his pencil up
long column of figures. You surely must
have been Joking
NO" answered the City Discoverer
timidly. Il wasn't l thought that no one
&C uld help being happy on such day ana
in such d place. 1t is simply perfect II
isw ..n,, :. ,u ,noore7- irop,red the
elderly Individual sharply, glancing up
from his note book for moment
About fourteen hundred dollars year;
replied the DiScoverer in considerable
ana cement But don't see what
Would you be happy if your income were
fourteen hundred dollars month";! IN
quired the stranger.
eddy, "even more There are So
Would you be happy if your income were
fourteen hundred dollars day." inquired
the elderly questioner, closing his note DOCK
abruptly.
why, 1 suppose So the Discoverer an
swered. in some wonder. Il should"
And suppose" continued the stranger
vigorously. rising and shaking his finger at
the Discoverer, that it were fourteen hun
dIed dollars a minute? Would you be
happy Them
You don't mean to inform me-" inquired
the City Discoverer brea thlessly, gazing in
rCCnd-eyed wonder at the elderly fndl-
vidual that your income is
More than that; more than that" re-
piled the self-declared millionaire. YEARLY.
Il don't know just how much more. Suf-
fee 1t to say that you have already oc-
cupied more than S11. 600 worth of my time.
Not that 1 shall ask you to reimburse me.
You could do nothing more unkind than
that"
The City Discoverer rubbed his eyes and
ga zed at the stranger in bewidered fashion.
I'm afraid l don't understand" he said
at length.
Sir said the stranger 1.-The possession
of riches is a calamity and curse. Re
main in close proximity to your fourteen
hundred and do not be lured into strange
paths by the fascination of that will of the
wfsp. the dollar mark. You, with fourteen
hundred a year. are happy and contented.
i, with fourteen hundred minute, am just
the opposite. Do you think your mex
perienced brain can cope with the various
kinds of complex troubles that lie in the
latter amount? Think. sir Fourteen hun
dred dollars minute means SS4.000 an
hour, 81 10000 a day. 81, $4,000 a week.
$50, 24S.O0O month. I0,24.0OO a year.
and
Stop" said the City Discoverer family.
Il cannot conceive
'Of course not" replied the bearded
stranger triumphantly and if you cannot
conceive of such an income, how do you
suppose you could spend it? Sir. tell you
the strain is terrible. Ever since l retired
from business 1 have been trying to spend
it. And in spite of all l can do it keeps
piling up. / now have an office force of
313 capable young men working various
schemes for getting rid of my money. My
Chief SuggestOr alone receives $4,000 year
for merely thinking of ways In which 1 may
dispose Of my income. A force Of seven
teen private secretaries is kept busy twelve
hours a day merely signing checks. And
yet the problem Is not solved: principal and
income alike are growing by leaps and
bounds"
The City Discoverer collapsed on the near
est stump, and took off his glasses while he
mopped his forehead
Yes continued the stranger, 1T all
seems futile. After 1 had made a large
part Of my wealth by the usual business
methods. 1 remembered the biblical injunc-
ton that it Is easier for camel to pass
through the eye of needle than for a rich
man to enter the kingdom of heaven.
laughed at first, and 1t is for this l am
being punished. When l tried to place my
self where the injunction would not affect
me- / found it was impossible. I could not
become poor 1t was then that l formed
my bureau for the distribution of income.
That Is also of no avail Despite the fact
that 1 have endowed 416 minor colleges
lifted the mortgages on 32I lnsovent
churches, endowed 1884 libraries. built
thrty-two homes for the aged and created
thirteen funds of s1O,0O0.O0O each. besides
spending hundred million or SO in other
things | find / am richer than ever. This
column of figures l am adding up shows
me that l have given away forty millions
this month but as my income was more
than sixty millions for the same time. l am
worse off than ever. Do you wonder that
l am unhappy?
go hence and never again envy those
with wealth. continued the Millionaire.
Go hence, and tonight on your Bonded
knees pray for the prosecuted, the doomed,
the unfortunate house of Carnegie
The City Discoverer didn't say word,
but slapped his hat on his head and de-
parted from the grove in an absolute daZe.
And as he trudged down the road little
distance away he met two men In blue suits
and blue caps who asked him II he had
seen an Individual answering the description
of the unhappy Millionaire.
Poor man." remarked the City Discov-
erer aloud, after he had directed the men
and continued on his way. I suppose they
were two OF the employees of his bureau