davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
4 Moral Lesson

"A criterion" explained the teacher.
rs something to 20 by. Now. what little
boy or girl will give me a sentence in
which the word criterion is used?"
After some moments OF silence and
thoughtfulness on the part OF the schol-
airs. Maggie higgins lifted her hand.
We'll, Maggie, can you give us the
sentence?"
"Yes'm. Pat Carrally's saloon on the
corner is criterion on our street. -
Judge.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27

DO you think that republics are IN
grateful"
We'll, answered Senator Sorghum.
they may be more or less ungrateful,
but they are not necessarily unremuner-
alive. "-Washington Star.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27

Bloomer-l am told there are twice
as many men as there are women at
rest ia the poorhouses of the country.
How do you account for IL?
Wiseiy-Very simply, my boy. The
women get the money. and we get the
rest-Cincinnati Commercial Tribune.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27

There's a lot Of talk in the papers. s.
SAID Mr.. Dumley. about The necessity
OF uniform divorce laws. wonder
what that means?"
Probably" suggested Mrs. Dumley.
its 70 compel divorced people 10 weai
a uniform SO other fol- 8 can recognize
EN- "-Philadelphia Press
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27

why is IL that SO many chess play
ers go crazy2"
well. ! can figure il ont on only
one theory. which is that people who
are likely TO 20 crazy are about the
only ones who can be expected 20 play
chess. Chicago Record Herald.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
Luxury in Alaska

Alaskan Host-Win you have straw
berries, mum?
Fair TOurist-Dear mel Strawberries
In Alaska Yes. indeed / will. But
what Is that you are pouring on them ?
II doesn't look like cream.
Alaskan Host-It's blubber, num-
N. Y. Weekly.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27

the subject under advisement. though
admitting that there would be much
money in II. giving as his reason that he
would have nothing to do WITH any pro.
ject which would include TIE sale OF II
Quor TO insu-e success.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
Suitably Named

Jones lived next door at fcrty-eight,
1--we al forty mine.
His children three make nifty times
More noise than six Of mine
Why This Is SO
] Go no, know,
But / have hears 10 STAGE.
They're fun OF animation. COS
Their names are "AnIie- MAY Ted"
Ally SlopeT
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27

Wife-Did YOU find out from your pub
Usher how many copies Of your book
had been sold?
Authorize. The only one vino was in
was the man who writes The advertkse-
ments about the number Of copies that
have been sOld.-Life.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
Twin Souls.

Jack and Vera come nearer fulfill
Ing my idea OF two souls with but
single thought than does any other
couple have ever known. He fairly
worships her"
And she fairly worships him."
No. she fairly worships herself
Houston Post.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
(, + 4 P. Eiissa%Sae; and si ss;:c


Trains ,,.v. .,-, mac Railroad.
s 20 a IN daily, Byrd 4 ThrouSb Aiu'
-. a m. danny except MondsV D.
mediation 49, A--"A AshiGnc -cooEr-
I,S s;s2 .,6 a m. daily Byrd st. vsronss
5 ~ sc noon. week days Byrd =, -h~o...
bnrS In y, m, week days. Byrd ST Fre5erScff.
n,o5s, r II week days. Elba. Ashlano so.o,,.-
$50 D. M daily. Byrd ST Through.
trains Arrive Ricnmona-southu,4
n, ~ a M week days Elba Ashland aooo,
b,Srs 80 q m. week d. avs. Byrd st. Freasr,oA.
10 % q. M daily, Byrd St Througb
L ocsi I'm =, m week days, Byrd ST. Thron0h
S Sis p. m. daily Main st. Throueh
-, 40 Z. ma week days. EIba Ashland 49,
a ;d5 p. m. daily Byrd St. Through
sto 49, D. m daily, Byrd st. THROUGH H.,
$50 p. m. daily. Main 81, rhr0r.s
az ~ - F. I'allmAn Sleeping or Par,or 9.
- C ~. trains except train arrsvtr. ~, GO
n1ods.to.oSo d. m week days and local sccS-1
line lime OF arrivals and departpras "a -
~ IONS not guaranteed ~ con
CO. ~ ~, ~ r. G. ". CULp W y IA Frop
ON IAN r Asst Gent Man TraF M IN
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27

Mark Twain does not like to write
letters. and this proves that he is a
very wise old owl. Letters produce
more trouble than any other invention
in the world.-Memphis Commercial
Appeal.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
plained.

Il see you a eood deal with that
young Sparks"
YES"
i thought You told me some time
ago that yod G.dn't like him"
Il didn't Ike hin some time ago
but he's changed"
Changed? How so?"
why. he's boueh; the finest auto
you ever sav."-St Lo&.s Post lis
patch
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
Bacteria in Milk.

The number OF bacteria in milk does
not prove its value. The bacteria pro-
duce the souring OF milk and such milk
is healthful. Then why judge milk by
fits bacterial content What we want
to keep out OF milk is not all the bac-
terra but the special kinds Of bacteria
that produce diseases.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
Accommodating.

My dear" said the decrepit million
aire TO his youthful bride. Il am only
too glad 70 die when think of the pleas
ure you Will derive from the fortune /
shall leave YOU"
IF IL makes you happy, dear" she re
piled. artiessly. consider Yourself dead
now. II ycu wish. ''-Brooklyn Life.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27

Cigarette inhalers are said to die
after a year Of inhaling; isn't that ter
rible?"
YES: terrible slow. 7 wish they'd
die after ten minutes Of it"-Houston
Post.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
The Southern Problem

Meandering Mike-Whats dat hear
about you takin' bath?
Thoughtful Terence-Dat's what I'm
going TO do. I'm goin ter try ter reduce
de acreage at least 20 per cent!-N. o.
Times Democrat.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
Then They Fought.

Gunner-What are you talking about.
man? Why this cigar Sc g expensive
II comes in a celluloid case.
Guyer- II m, Is that the celluloid
case you are smoking or the cigar
Chicago News
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
Worth While

Perhaps you've stored no wealth away.
Nor gained a higter place.
But praise Yourself. for well YOU may.
II you have bruised no heart to-day.
And shown a cheerful face.
Chicago Record Herald
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27

After all. the most effective reguIa.
tion OF the use and speed OF automo.
biles is courtesy. caution and common
sense on the part OF the operator at
the lever.-Hartford Times.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27

Johnny" said the Sunday school
teacher. what is 2 certuT.on?"
Hes a feiltr what rides a hundred
miles on a bike IsC-~ptly answered the
ioy.--N. y. Ti.c-s
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
Serious Damage.

I'm glad to see you didn't laugh al
that poor old man when be fell down, p
said the stranger.
That's my gran'-pop.' the little boy
howled oh, boo, boo"
Don't cry boy. There's nothing seri.
GUS
oh WOW, lie sat down in my mud
pies. an III bet he's busted EN- all.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
Interested In omens.

The finding OF a spider on the wed
ding gown Of a bride is an omen OF
future happiness. Did you knew that,
Harold 20
Glad TO hear a. I found a hair
snake on my coat sleeve last evening.
Wonder what that presages. "-Cincin-
natl Commercial-Tribu
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
A Gentleman Ru-slar.

Madge-How do you know Il was the
Gentleman Burglar who held you up?
Dolly-Because when told him I
carried my raOrey IN a garter purse he
didn't attempt TO take it-Town Top
ics
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
Not So Rad.

woman whose friends called her Molly
Lost her husband one DAY by a trolly:
But he was Insured
His loss was endured
And tho baby was bought a new dolly.
Houston Post
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27

1pon which man may ride while driy-
ing, says Farm and Home. OF course
IN light soil. where less weight 10 the
leveler ia required. the man will not
ride. The cut herewith shows the con
struction of such a leveler with seat
saw a device OF this kind used in Texas
very probably IL costs little 10 make
and saves the expense OF a bought
implement
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27

Mrs Houskeep-Yes. simply had To
buy this plain gown on account of our
cook
Mrs. Ascum-I don't understand.
Mrs. Houskeep-Well, she goes In for
gaudy things and want 10 have just one
dress that she won't copy Philadelphia
Press.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27

in France yer
most of the roads
of this country
which is not often
thought of is point
ed out by Prof. A.
Z. Brigham. of Col
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
A Pleasant Combination.

Jenks-Hummerton's a clever chap
isn't he?
Jonks-l've never discovered it
Jenks-He looks like a sage.
Jonks-Yes; but he smells of the
onions and talks like the goose.-Ally
Sloper.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27

heavy ground. must
be of good weight.
This can be most
conveniently ap-
piled 10y attaching
60 the leyeler a seat.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
Femme intelligence.

DO you believe men like women
with intelligence" asked the serious
girl.
Yes, answered Miss Cayenne pro
vided they have enough OF il to refrain
from impressing the man with his ig-
norance. Washington Star.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
FRANCE HAS Better ROADS
A Comparison of Road Building
Which Is Not Highly Flat
tering 20 America.

An aspect OF the advantage possessed
by the scientifically constructed roads
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
A cLoD cRUsHER.
Put a Seat on 1t SO That Weight Of
Driver May Help in the
Work

clod crusher and ground leveler.
TO be effective. especially on rough and
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
HOW DO LIKE TIE sAMpLEsr

Samples OF wine anC samples ~ beer.
Samples OF all kinds Of lluucfS sod here.
samples or whisky. samples cfIIr.
Samples OF al. KINGS ~ oi.rers- semi
Samples OF headache. 81. rsu.es ~ s-out
samples OF COATS with TIE o bows out.
Samples Of boots withcrt bees or tees.
eamp.es OF men with a br1keu nose.
samples OF men in tho gutter ly.Lg.
samples OF men with lC.friurn cAf.g
samples OF uen cursirg auC caring.
Samp-es OF men a. evil daii.L
samples OF forey ti.cc n er.
VINO long In vain for tLeir freedom again:
Samples Or CSC men. y. rn in ,fe strife.
samples Of young men thtC CT lie.
samples Of Tuirc cd hopes arc ives.
samples OF ceso.ase homes ana wives.
samples OF aching hearts grown cod
Win anguish and misery un.od.
Samp-cs n nob.c youth iu olS-.ace.
VINO meet YOU With averted face
samples Of hUrgry 3t;.e ones
S'dt WING 20 cSath lu their creary homes
az iac'. there Is scatcc.y woe on earth
but our 'samp.es-' have nurtured or given
them bilth
oh. all ye helpers 10 sorrow ard crime
VINO zeal out death FOR a si-g.s dime
NhoW " mat the Loro. tiough lie may de-
lay.
has IT. reserve for the ,as. great day
Inc terrible woe GO t.I,t,s eunr weigh;
No mortal con know 81 the yearly safe
is closed anl az with one accord
ASSlA,noM.ed&e ire Justice Of their reward
Virginia J Kent
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
Worse and Worse.

Miss Passay-No. I don't like him.
BE accused me OF giving the impress
sion that was younger than I really
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27

Miss Sharpe-Ol he has more sense
than that He merely accused you of
trying 10 give that impression.-P
adelphia Press.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27
SEABOARD
AIR LINE RAILWAY

snort Line to the principal Cities OF
the South ard Southwest.
Florida, Cuba and Mexico.
TRAINS LEAVE RICHMOND. MAIN ST
STATION DAILY. -scheduIein eject
April 10th, 1905
and Charlotte
<'S0 D. m.-SEABOARD Mail. composed OF Pnu.
man sleeping cars 10 Atlanta
savannah and Jacksonville. SEA.
Board Cafe cars are also operated
on I1is train, they are maintsinod at
tne nsheSt degree OF excellence. a.
20 large comfortable day coaches
ro.oo =, - Ie In without change to Florida
WV - III - II, "a aB5,OARD EXPRESS. Composed
- fonnlan sleepers to Atlanta
SEABOARD Cafe cars and -
coaches. running to Florida without
change.
TRAINS ARRIVE RICHMOND DAuv
ossS a. m.-From Florida, Atlanta "a ,ha
Southwest N 'H~
800 ,. m-=From Florida, Atlanta and thu
Southwest. ~ "no
% p m--From local points
For ali information as 70 rates srhas,les
a A concessions apply TO any sEABOARD
II. 5. LEARD, w M TAyrop
District Passenger Agt City Ticket Ast
SOB East Main ST.. Richmond. Va
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1905-05-27

Long-Did you give him the high
sign?
Short-Well, did the best could
Chicago Journai.
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1905-06-07
ORELS DESPERATE CREW


TOXIC. June :, 1905, As 70 the
causes of the annillilation Of the Rus
sian feet in the battle of the Sea df
Japan the Japan Mails" critic points
out that the japanese g1llners habitually
nraetised in rough water, holding that
unless he was effective from an unsteady
platform the marine artillerist was of
little use. The Russians habitually did
their practise in smooth water. The
high seas that prevailed on the day Of
the battle were distinct advantage TO
the Japanese.
The sinking of the battleships Boro-
dino and Alexander III. and other Rms
sian ships was due to their fore-and-aft
watertight compartments. When one
side of compartment was pierced and
filed with water the equilibrium Of the
ship was destroyed and the firing was
stopped
The unparalleled effectiveness of the
japanese torpedo attack is still the sub
ject of discussion. Many believe that
submarines or some new explosive irn-
proved the torpedo practice Among the
Japanese the theory that the Russian
ships were destroyed by submarine mines
is persistentiy held
A tragic incident occurred on board
the Russian battIeship Orel which WAS
conveyed to Saseb0. The commander OF
the japanese battleship Asahi, Capt To
so, was in charge Of the prize crew He
found in Capt Yunik the wounded com
mander of the Orel. an old friend They
were comrades together in St Peters
burg Their meeting in the cabin. where
Can't. Iunik was dying was affecting
That night ten of the Orel's crew at
tempted to blow up the magazine The
Japanese discovered the attempt lust II
time. Eight Of the Russians were shot
ON the spot They had nobly tried t0
atone for the ;aisgraceful surrender by
Admiral Niebogatoff at the Liancouri
Rocks.
Another incident on hoard the Orel was
the throwing overheard by the Russian
sailors of a dozen wounded comrades
who were begging to be put out Of theis
misery. This was done before the Ian.
anese could interfere to prevent it. Capf
Yunik repeatedly apoiogzed for fhe dis
orderly conduct of his men. The eal2anf
officer expired on the morning of May sc
off Maizuru and was buried al sea witt
all the honers of war.
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1905-06-07
BRIGGS DENIES.

Special to .sThe Jersey city News.'')
TRENTON, June I, 1905. i small
ler number Of visitors than usual on
Governors day called at the executive
department yesterday. Among the visi-
tors to the Governor were State Treas
urer Frank o. Briggs. chairman of the
Republican State Committee and Major
Carl I.entz. member of the State Com
mittce from Essex.
They were asked if they discussed
with the Governor the action which. a
Newark newspaper said, the State Com
nittee was going to take the coming
fan III the local election Of the members
of the Legislature in order TO secure the
election Of men who would support the
present administration. in It's desire 10
make the maximum tax act an effective
measure.
oh. thar article is a lie made out of
whole cloth, " quickly responded Major
Lentz, The State COMMITTEES does not
propose to do anythsng of the kind. Ask
the chairman there. Mr. Briggs
Mi. Briggs was appealed Is aud said: !:
The statement that the State Commit
tee proposes 10 III any way interfere with
the locag elections i wholly without
&. J. = -
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1905-06-07
BALTIMORE LEADS
Bufalo's Defeat Yesterday
Put the Orioles in First
Place and the Skeeters
IN Second.


Rain and Buffalo's defeat by the Ori-
oles made quite change in the positions
Of the higl-notchers in the Eastern
League contest Buffalo took a double
tumble from the proud position Of first,
which she has held since the season
opened. The Orioles perched on the top
roost and tlle Skeeters are next to em.
The Bisons are in third place Yester-
days defeat of the Champions was due
mainly to an attack Of rattles which
seized Matthewson, the Buffalo twirler,
in the second inning, when the Birds
scored quartet Of runs. Burehell's
fine pitching for the Orioles did the rest.
The score by innings:
Buffalo .........0 / / @ 90 0 ? o.
Batteries RurcheIl and Beyers; Ma
thewson and MeAllister.
RESULTS Yesterdays GAMES.
Baltimore. Buffalo. 4.
The Jersey City-Montreal, Newark
Rochester and Pr0yidence-Toronto games
were prevented by rain
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1905-06-07
NO MORE JUNK BELLS.

Chief Of Police Murphy has received
numerous letters from residents Of yari-
Gus sections Of the city expressing their
Joy over the prospect of the abatement
Of the junk wagon bell nuisance. An or
siinanep to abolish the nuisance is now
pending before the Board Of Aldermen.
IT has passed its first reading. For years
past residents. especially in the lower
section Of the city. have complained Of
the almost nnceasing jangle Of the strings
Of COW bells that announces the approach
of the junkman on his daily rounds.
There have become 50 many Of them
that the bells Of one wagon scarcely
pass beyond ear-shot before those Of
another take up the nerve-wracking jan
gle.
''The passage Of this ordinance, said
the Chief this morning. 'will do away
with an almost insufferable nuisance
with which the public has had to con-
tend for many years"
The ordinance provides that the wag-
ems shall bear plates announcing the
name Of the owner and the number Of
the license.
"There is another nuisance said the
Chief. (which should be done away with.
and that is the waste paper nuisance
which keeps the streets constantly lit
tered. Almost every kind of effort has
been made by the police to abate tlli.
nuisance. but without much avail The
only way that / can see to stop it effect.
lively is to give out a separate contract
from that Of the removal of ashes ami
garbage and have the waste paper col
lected from house to house"
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1905-06-07

the statement Of former Senator Smith
was exceedingly interesting.
This is the FIRST have heard Of the
report, said he, .bnt l am not surprised
to hear that 5zr MeCarter IS contemplate
ingAresigning, because his position is not
one to be envied, with the sentiment Of
the people 50 much opposed to the man
agement Of the company for the service
rendered to them.
president McCarter being an able
lawyer. Will no doubt make more money
at ii practice than as the president Of the
corporation, and without the worriment
and annoyance that go with the latter =
President McCarter. Of the Public Ser
vice Corporation, later gave out the fol-
lowing statement in reference to the re-
port that he contemplated resigning the
presidency of The Public Service Corpora
tom:
My attention has been called to GER
tain articles published in the New York
and Philadelphia papers of this morning,
in which it is stated that am seriously
considering resigning the position of press
ident Of Public Service. The articles, by
whomsoever written. are SO similar in
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1905-06-07
CLUB WOMEN GATHER.


Special to ssThe Jersey City News'')
ATLANTIC CITY. June Z, 1865
The Advisory Council Of the General
Federation Of Women's Clubs met here
yesterday and they will hold sessions to.
day and Tomorrow at the ChaIfonte.
Presidets of all State Federations and
City Gibbs have been invited. so that the
work of The Nasi nal Federation may be
come familiai. TO tliem.
Directors Of the council held an exec
utive meeting in the afternoon. and at
night the Research Club, of Atlantic
City, received Mrs. Sarah Platt Decker,
president of the Federation, and such
club women as had arrived in Atlantic
City. AIRS. Joseph Thompson. president
of the entertaining club, and Mrs A. B.
Endicott made the arrangements for the
entire session.
Tie meeting was called to order at 10
o'clock this morning, and the Rev. An
toinette Brown Blackwell, the first wo-
man ordained as minister in the United
States, and 4 resident Of Elizabeth, Of
fsred prayer. The hymn, 'sBlest Be the
Tie that Binds, was sung. Mrs An
drew ]. Newbury, president Of the New
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1905-06-07

LITTLE HOPE Of
PEACE
United States Government
Sees Small Prospect Of
Ending the Eastern War
OREL'S DESPERATE CREW
Jap Conquerors Frustrate
Their Attempt to Blow Up
the Ship.

WASHINGTON, June 5, 1905Aa
though the Government has not lost hops
that its conversational exchanges with
foreign diplomatic representatives mar
lead to a peace agreement between Rms
sia and Japan, it has reached the point
where it is willing to admit that its
efforts may soon prove fruitless. One
Of f1le highest Administration officials
said today, in response to question as
to when some authoritive statement
might be expected with regard to the
character of the Presidents conferences
with European Ambassadors and the
japanese Minister, that no such state-
ment might ever be made, and the inti-
nation he conveyed was that if nothing
was accomplished the work which the
President was doing IN behalf Of peace
would not appear as a matter Of record
or history, officially or unoffieially.
II is thought here that the resignation
of NJ Delcasse, the head Of the French
Foreign Office. may have some effect on
any movement for peace which may be
taken BY the Powers. The French Min
lister of Foreign Affairs has been receg-
nized as Russia's strongest friend in the
Partisan Government, and his leaving the
Government service at this time may
tend TO deter any movement toward
peace which with NJ. Deleasse in charge
,ni<,h+ hava Hal q snnd effect