The commonwealth. (Greenwood, Miss.) 1896-1923, 1905-07-21
A STRENUOUS
GOAT

w andy-complected person as
the car pulled out from the lake the
other morning III 1t amt one thing
IFS another"
Huh commented the man with
abe specs, Hens must a-tooled you
this mornin', and yuh didn't git no
aigs,"
"Perchancn tho cutwOrms put your
gyarden on the fritz Clipped in the
tall, blue-eyed youth with the broad
as" and the slang procliylty.
Hy this time the other amateur
farmers were sitting up and taking
notice,
'Tain't nuther hens ncr cutworns
what's botherlD' me-, growled the per-
son with the orange countenauce who
had started the entertainment. ITS
goats. About a week ago / bought a
goat Of the real buttinsky type for that
Oldest boy Of mine, seems he wanted
something to play with nice and harm
less, Well, sir, when that goat walked
in my front gate the first chapter OF
another book Of troubles was begun.
In his early youth the beast must have
deyoured a do luxe edition of The
Strenuous Life, and, take my word for
ii, the best part of the volume stuck
in his throat, And talk about buttin'
IN, II that goat wasn't as devoid OF
manners as a cows back is Of feath.
crs,
"~John-thats my boy-had several
heart-to-hear Dialogues with Billy. and
endeavored to steer his course into the
straight and narrow. but there wal
nothin' doin'. Billy, however, was as
hard headed inside as he was out, and
he turned John the scornful ear. Now,
my boys got a wad o. sentiment that
he comes by naturally, so when the
animal got chesty he felt disappointed
like and started for the house. His
whiskers, the goat, started for the
same destination at the same time. and
being In more of a hurry than John
was, John received a Jolt that made
his teeth chatter. Ever since then that
lad Of mine has been taking nourish-
ment from the mantel and sleeping
face down,
when | heard all the dlstressful
circumstances, me for the goat, says I.
For half an hour | tried to inject some
p~redigested etiquette into the way
ward beast, but he would have none
of 1t, He wagged his ears and shifted
the atmosphere, and |, being a good
Judge of when things are goin' to hap.
pen, took to the timothy, Well, /
ain't as active as In the good old days
on The plains and | can't push the sod
from under me with as much rapidly
M you might snppose.
"Btll, with that de luxe Of The
Strenuous Life In his cav, embarked
on the same course as your humble
servant, To be sure, he started later.
hut he travelled OF better schedule. and
as we were both moving on a single
track, Bill caught me about. three feet
from the kitchen door, This part of
the story is sad to relate. Suffice It
to say that II Prof, Langley could "a,
seen me that last three feet to
the kitchen he'd got some new ideas
about aerial transportation business,
When II m to cutting a swath In
the gentle atmosphere and causing a
CULVER among the ethereal waves. |
had Santos Dumont beat to a frazzle.
! belieye-and | come by this knnwl-
edge through the stern school of prac.
teal experience-that the one element
lacking to enable us critters to fly Is
sufficient force at the beginning--even
If you get 1t at the beginning of a
goat
But, getting back to earth. there
amt NO goat in Montgomery connty
that a treat me the way Bill did
and get away without being rebuked.
Hanging up in my den was an old
cavalry sabor that did good service
In the cos south Of the Mason aud
Dixon and although it seemed a sac.
silege to shake the dust from the