The Forrest City times., 1905-08-04

ing up mat will let no foreigners with pocketboOk escape.
 l It took us an hour to go through the harem, and it was more like going 1 through the quarters of the working women of home laundry in the tene- ment district of large city, than Q comic opera, as we had been led to expect by what we had read of harems 1 When We went into the harem I think 1 dad was going to insist on having the women dance for him, while he sat on throne and threw kisses at the most beautiful women in all the world. but l before we had got around all the box stalls think if any of them had start ed to dance dad would have stampeded in a body.
 We finally got back to the great mar ble room. where the sultan was sleeping in stuffed chair, surrounded by his staff, and one of them woke him up, and he asked dad what he thought of the home life of crowned head, and dad said it beat anything he had ever seen, and he should recommend to his govern men that the harem system be adopted in America, and actually the sultan seemed pleased. He said as an evidence of his love for America he wanted to present to the president. through dad. 50 of his wives, and if dad would indicate where he wanted them delivered. they would be there Johnny on the spot. or words to that effect
 E,-t . away, but I whispered to him that il would be discourteous to decline pres ent, after giving the sultan gold mine and that may be the old man would bt so mad, if he declined the wives. that ht would tie stones to our legs and sink us in the Bosphorous. so dad rallied and said on behalf of his government, he would accept the kindly and thoughtful l gift of his highness, and that he would | cable for war vessel to take the wives to his own America, and he would notify the sultan when to round them up and l load them on the vessel.
 We'll sir. I do not know what possessed me to make scene before we got out of the presence of the sultan. but it all came to me sudden. like an inspiration comes to poet. I had been eating some fruit that 1 bought in a paper bag, and when l had eaten the last of it, won dered what I would do with the bag. and then 1 thought what fun it would be to blow the bag up. and suddenly burst it. when all was still. So I blowed up the bag, so it was as hard as bladder, and tied a string around the neck. and waited. l did not think how afraid everybody in these old countries is of bombs, or I never would have done it. honestly.
 The sultan was signing some papers, and looking out of the corners of his eyes, to see if anybody was present who was suspicious, and dad was getting ready to make a salam, and back out of the presence of the ruler of Turkey, when I got behind some of the officials who were watching the sultan, and laid my paper bag on the marble floor, and it was as still as death. and all you could hear was the scratching of the pen, when 1 jumped up in the air as though had fit. and yelled Allah" ," | and came down with my whole weight on the paper bag, and of ell the stam- | pedes you ever saw. that was the worst.
 You know what a noise it makes to bust a paper bag. Well. this was the toughest old bag 1 ever busted, and 1t sounded like cannon fired down cellar somewhere, and the air was full of dust, and before could get up the sultan had tipped over the table, and run yelling into another room. praying to Allah" and all the staff had lit OF. for tall tim 1 Der. and there was nobody left but dad and the unique and myself. and the unique took dad by the arm and started for the door, and we were fired out.
 As I went out of the room I looked around, and there was Turks head sticking out of every door, to see how many had been killed by the bomb, and as we got out doors. dad said: Now we have to get out of Turkey before night, or we die. Me for Egypt, boy. if We can catch boat before we are drawn and quartered" So here goes for Cairo, Egypt Your onlx.
 HENNERY.