The news & observer., 1905-10-08
MIRANDY ON
THEORIES.
Copyright New York A1nerican)

Hits a mighty funny thing TO me-
said Mirandy obviously, dat de bet
ter talk sounds de wus hit pans out
Yassun. when i hears anything ia
sounds so nice an likely, afR natcR1
dat hit seems lax hit is bound to be
so whedder hit is or not, right der
an dar is when / begins to sheer off
Gaze I done took notice dat mos OF
desc heah pretty idees kinder balks
an buck jumps when you tries to put
'em to wuk.
"Yassum Use done had my 'sper-
ience monkeyin' wild things dat sound
ed des as easy as rollin' off of a
CREASED log when you hear tell of EN-
an dat was as hard as havin' yo' eye
tooth pulled when you come to doin
'em, an hits sorter shook my faith in
words. Aain't | buy melojum on de
installment Gaze a man figger hit out
to me how l kin pay for hit widout
ever missin' de money, or know dat
is doin' hit?
"Aain't try to follow de advice Of
dat ole maid whut speechify to de
mothers club, an tell us how we
hadn't oughter whip our chillen. but
govern dem by de law of love, an
dat eff we never speak harshly to de
little angels dat dey'll always be good
an perlite an gentle an obedient?
+ 'tAn' whut come of all dat smooth
talk? Amt I still takin' in washin'
to pay for dat melojum? An amt l
had to wear out bed slat an bust
de rollin' pin on dem chillen befo'
gets 'em back whar dere was any
livin' in de house wild 'em? Yassum,
de law Of love sounds mighty nice to
hear bout. but hit don't seem to work
servirous enough on de constitution
of reel healthy chillen.
" 'Taint dat is doubtin Thomas.
but Is des got my suspicion, an
when dey come a prognosticatin' to
me wild dey new tangled idees abut
hoy dey could bring on de millennium
eff folks would do dis an do dat,
myself wild my tukky tail fan, case
knows dat somewhar or nuther down
de road dey's gwine to run over some
little bit of a fact dat's gine to knock
deY words to Kingdom come
But dat amt de way wild Ike. NV
Ian. but he's a believer Dere amt
nothin' dat he couldn't swallow eff
twas told him by a man in black
coat wild a beaver hat an one of
desc heah oily kind of voices. An
dat amt de wuss. De minute Ike gets
hold of a new idee he wants to put
hit into practice. Cose hit don't make
no diffunce whut anybody believes as
long as dey don't do nothin' but think
hit. De mix-up comes when dey tries
to try hit on odder folks.
Oats de reason I knowed dat trou-
bic warn't far off when Ike comes
home de odder night wild a kinder up-
lifted look an begun castin' sheen
eyes at me whilst 1 was a cookin' de
supper. / never let on dat l seen hit,
cover, an he didn't say Goth-
In ontell dc dishes was washed up.
an den call me In de odded room. an
when / come in he jumped out from
behind de do an give me smakin'
kiss right on de mouf.
Huh says /. you needn't think
vou kin git aroun me dat way an
borrer any money. Gaze I done save
IN dat fo' dollars to buy little Teddy
Roosterfelt A new suit of clothes, an
hit goes into clothes an not into de
rran game. an dat's de word wild de
bark on hit
oh. Mirandy,' SAYS he in hurt
voice. how kin you talk dat way tn
ne when / was des actin lax I did
when ! was a-courtin' your
'Wid dat he sets down on re sofv
ans nulls me down beside him, an
~oll'n' his owes un fIe says. as he
"auoze my hand: Dis little soft hand
shall know no harder work dan
my fevered brow or nestlin'
In my own when de days work is
over
"'well,' 'spon's I, 'ef I don't disre-