West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1905-07-06
And the Governor are Cheersd by the
Kind Words From Their Friends
Back In Preston County.
THEY CONTEMPLATED TAKING
PASSAGE ON SUICIDAL ROUTE
Until They Heard From Their
Friends at Home-Tho Night.
mares Are Less Frequent
And he Hopes For a
Speedy Recovery.

through ticket on the Suicidal route.
We feel that the sympathy of our
Preston county friends is genuine
and that they have no sinister mo.
tive in urging us to remain on earth
to torture us. That we have been
sufficiently tortured since the 9th
day Of June can be verified by a
certificate from our physicians and
the great seal Of the State which we
have striven to exalt in the eyes of
the people of this great Nation and
make every true West Virginian feel
proud of. We feel that we shall be
honored by the coming generation
like the prehistoric people whom
historians Wiley and Garner have
erected mounds to and written their
epitaphs IN prose and poetry. If
Bros. Wiley and Garner should be
alive and able to weld the pen when
Gov. Dawson and myself take our
flight to that land where huckleber-
ries can never be the issue for
front seat in the New Jerusalem, we
may expect the good people to call
upon them to extol our greatness and
the loss to the Nation with the Big
Stick. But the Governor and my.
self have made no arrangements to
take our departure, unless we are
called upon to attend another polit-
ical funeral and act as the chief
mourners. If this should come to
pass our friends should have no hes
itancy in hunting up Bros. Wiley
and Garner and engaging them on
the best terms possible. AS histo.
rians there is no doubt but what
they would insist on writing history
as the Governor and / have manu-
featured it to suit the political con
ditions which we labored to place
on the market at par value. 1t
might be well to suggest to our
friends that in the event that Bros.
Wiley and Garner cannot afford to
tarnish their regulations as histo-
rians for a consideration that they
be permitted to drop into poetry.
Poetry cannot always confine itself
to the facts of history, and so long
as they could sing our praises and
get the proper jingle and metre in it
the people would be satisfied. Our
enemies would have to be for they
could not reach us with the wireless
biography.
AS you are probably aware have
resumed my duties as Promoter. 1
was relieved of the Temporary Gov
ernorship on the return of Gov.
Dawson from the Second Congress.
ional District where he was an eve
witness to the Waterloo which was
foretold by Orator Hughes in his
Keyser Grafton before the patriotic
piemen. The Governor tells me
that it has always been a source of
great pleasure to him heretofore to
read about Waterloos, but he is en-
phatic in his declaration that one
experience with Waterloo will sat
isfy the most fastidious. He has
taken out additional life insurance
against the second Waterloo.
But must tell you of my expert
ence as Temporary Governor. 1t
would take several issues of THE
ARGUS to relate it all. / was over
crowded with invitations from the
nobility and the aristocratic portion
of the commonwealth to be their
guest of honor at all social functions.
AS a functionlst | was pronounced
success. Many told me excelled
Barry Walls and Harry Lair. l
had a society suit made to order.
Or, to be truthful IN the matter, a
tailor of the town presented me with
the suit to advertise his goods. /
paid for nothing while / was Gov
ernor. Everyone was my friend
looking for favors as / discovered
later. / never knew had so many
bosom friends IN prison until was
In position to open the doors and
let them out. Strange how your
friends will remember you in your
prosperity and forget your address
in your adversely This is the one
thing that set me TO thinking that I
would like TO succeed my friend
Billy Dawson as the real Governor.
Then my friends would not forget
me: But, If at the expiration Of
friend Billy's term / am compelled
to return to the red brush Of Pres
ton, / will be lost to hattery and no
fsvors asked This makes me about
as sad as the returns from the Sec.
ond Congressional District But /
am not sure but what ! would be
more contented and happier attend.
ing the meetings Of the Lime Kiln
Club in Geo. Herring's store listen
ing 10 a discussion between Bros.
Shaw, Cressap, Menear, Jas. A..
Brown and Che rest Of the members.
Gov. Dawson returned too soon
for me to pardon all my friends who
arc ia prison. Many Of them wrote
me that they we're sent 10 prison for
their eageness in trying 10 increase
the majorities in the precincts where
10 required one man 20 vote several
times TO get the desired majority.
This might be called patriotic in a
man who has but a few yeats 10 live
and no better half 20 mourn his 60.
ing, but a man who has the ambi
ton 20 be Governor or a Congress
man it would pay him TO let the
other man do the voting after he
casts the first ballot. This has al
ways been my plan and ] never fail
TO caution the Sunday school chill
dren, whom 7 address by special ia
yitatIon, when they are enjoying an
outing as the guests Of my old friend
DR.. Lanham 10 is % be hoped
that the next session Of the Legisla.