The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1905-05-28

is bachelor, lase a widoWer has
sorter had his spirit broken, an is
bride, wise, an some says deres one
reason for dis, an some says dere
anudder.
Some folks argufy dat de reason
dat men don't marry is bekuse de
girls amt familious nuf wild de cook
stove, an dey think more about
prancin' aroun' in good clothes dan
dey does bout how to sling de pots
an de pans. But my land! dat amt
no season at all Dyspepsy ain
never skered no man off from gittin
married vet. If a man is in love wild
gal he thinks dat he amt never
gwine to be hungry no mo-, an he
| amt prognosticatin' whut sort of
hand She got wild a polk chop. He's
thinkin dat hes gwine to hold her
| lily white han in his de, balance of
his life.
colder folks says dat de reason
bachelors don't marry is because dey
is selfish an wants to spend der
money on themselves. Huh! l done
travelled long ways through dis vale
of sorriers an l done took notice dat
| fuss or last. some woman gifts mans
money. OATS de way de good Lawd
fixed it. Man was made to wuk for
woman. an I amt never seen any
yet dat lodged it. If it amt one wo-
man dat gifts his pay envelope on
Saturday night. it's anudder, an /
know its a lot cheaper to buy calico
dresses for q wife dan it is to pay
for silk frocks and jay bird heel
shoes for a sweetheart. Yassum, a
wife sho' is a economy to a man.
"Nawm, dem amt de reasons dat
mon don't marry. De reasons is wild
de gals. De gals is too willin'. Dey
runs after de men. an a woman is
| lax a hen. She amt built for run
min" an she can't ketch q husband
| by persooin' him. He always out
runs her.
Gals used to play kinder ofish
an act lax a man would have to beg
an persuade on his knees befo' dey
would condescend to marry him, an
/ de Pas and de Mas would hang
aroun' lax dey was tryin' to keep him
! from stealing DER treasurer from 'um,
an it made q man feel lax he had
to do somethin' an do it quick, if he
didn't want to let de prize get away
from him. So he up and popped de
! question, an was married befo you
| could say scat
! "But now de gals in on de anxious
| seat, an dey don't make no bones of
who knows it. Dey hangs aroun'
whar a man wuks, an calls him up
! by de telefoam if he fergits to come
/ to see UNI, an becaze ne thinks he can
marry a gal any old day he keeps
! putin it off. an he don't marry her
/ at al.
"An' right dar when she make her
! self too easy to get is what gal
draps her rabbit foot. De way to
conjure man is by making yourself
scace. not by lettin him git too much
of you. A man has got to have some
! thin to make him jump into mater
! mony, lax when the auctioneer says,
| Going, going, gone!'
Nov. when / fust sot my eyes on
! Ike-an' he certn'ly was a busson-
bic man in dem days-dere wuZ a
! lot of women settin' aroun' him so
| habbergaged dat dey ketch DER
breath ev'y time dat he look at 'em,
| an Ike he des fling um a word now
an den. lax you would fling a bone
to dog an den dey would go home
/ an scuffle aroun' to see which one
could make him de biggest cake. an
! de finest pie an Ike he amt layin'
awake at night, a projeckin' in his
mind which one of dem women dat
he gwine to wuk and suppo't de bal
ance Of his life. KaZe he knows all
l-of dem is deg waiting to be axed.
But you better believe / didn't
| jine dat hallelujah chorus dat was
/ saying, Amen evy time he open his
mouth. Nawm, / done cut my wis
dom teeth. an knows better den dat
/ des pass him by wild a discomtempt-
Gus look. an dat night / went over
an borrowed Marse John Jones's bull
dog an de fus' time dat Ike come to
see me | got Pap to sic de bull dog
on him.
| "Yassum comm a-courtin' me sho
was q risky job, kaze dat was a bad
! bull dog, an befo' | promised Ike to
sashay up de church aisle wild him
| he done lost no seat of four pair o.