davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03
Fame Thrust Upon Him.

DISPATCHES from Hazel, S. D., announce that
~: "a farmer named Smith = has harvested FIVE
thousand bushels Of potatoes from field of forty
seven acres, and expects to make profit of no
less than $4,000.
Smith is doubtless content with the pecuniary
reward OF his labor, and surely cares nothing for
the glory of his tuberous achievement, or he would
have taken pains to give his initials to the cor
respondent Z Tho fate tried to conceal him, there
are ways OF decorating the plain name of Smith
until it will give forth all the aroma Of aristoc-
racy, and will make the owner distinct figure and
household word. J. Montmorency or B, Archi-
bald Smith would raise no more potatoes, prob
ably, than the plain farmer ramed Smith, y but
they would arrest attention as F. Hopkinson has
done Vanity, apparently, is no part of the. makeup
OF the potato farmer named Smith. There is no
need for taking the starch out Of him. Potatoes
and cash. are full satisfaction.
All admiring community, however, will never
permit Smith to go thru life as plain Smith, after
MS envlabe achievement in agriculture Hazel is
proud OF Smith and his five thousand bushels of
tubers, and will sound his praises in future DAYS.
Smith despite his modesty, will find it beyond his
power to stay down and concealed from public
notice under his family or generic name Hence
forth to all the world and the rest of mankind
he IS "Potato Smith, Long after his achieve
ments OF the year 1905 have disappeared by the
avenues Of Saratoga chips or German fried, the
man who coaxed $4,000 from forty-seven acres will
stand on his own peculiar pedestal Of fame. All
honor to Potato Smith,
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03
Gerrnany's Cry Of Fire.

HERE is an old story Of man who ON leaving
- his children alone in the house instructed them
it thieves came in his absence not to crv robbers.
but to shout fire, for the neighbors would run to
help them put out fire while they would only barri-
cades their own houses against thieves
. The Germans have been having a hard wrestle
with the natives in southwest Africa The Herreros
who have no conception of benevolent assimilation,
have been bowling the kaiser's best regiments
as It he not the war lord at whose frown Europe
trembles .a. =.... ......@
The Germans roared thieves)until they were
hoarse and none came to their rescue, but in a
moment of inspiration Germany shouted ire-"The
colonies OF England are in danger Presto, hot
wave of sympathy for Germany goes over England
IS necessary to put down the Herreros lest their
rebelious spirit spread to British South Africa IF
Germany cannot do it, England must and will
Wonderful, that cry of fire. It has linked Jealous
nations in league of defense. The Herreros will
be wiped out; their very memories erased from the
native home. Their bravery will be rewritten as
fanaticism; their objections to slavery set down to
incapaeity for civilization.
Marvellous civilization! It found world 50
large that it represented the unknown parts by hid
ecus monsters sitting on the edge Of the map. But
1T small that the monsters appear to occupy
the center Of civilization rather than its outposts
Uneonsciously civilization may have been copying
its own features when it drew pictures Of hydras
and dragons on the map Of Asia and Africa.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03
France and Her Grafters.

HE spirit Of making money out Of the govern
ment IS as oldsas government. Modern gov
einments are more highly organized and therefore
afford the CRATER more devious ways Of going about
to make a profit. America is not the only land
which has trouble with this modern brood Of leeches
The republic of France has its government continu-
ousy under suspicion, but its government changes
often that IT is more difficult for system Of graft
to grow up. 1a5as3@
a recent writer on French affairs calls attention
to the fact that the French senator and deputy re-
ceived the enormous salary Of Is francs a day and
yet good people noticeW admiration that most of
those whom they have elected live at the rate of
$4,000 francs year and retire monaires when the
Legislature comes to an end. This phenomenon he
says forces INTO political career large number
OF citizens who are anxious to devote themselves to
the service Of their country and the welfare of the
people, W.
The people Of France are fearful that all is not
well with their defences. The army which has cost
10000 million francs since Sedan is from time to
time advertised the finest in the world, but when
ever It comes to question of using it the ministers
who praised it the oudest are the first to find flaws
in its organization and to counsel waiting until it
can be perfected.
There is more than one reason to suppose that
the army. Of France exists pretty much on paper.
The Dreyfus scandal showed it to be in terrible
condition Of unreadness@ It was a question then
whether the generals of France the secret service
Of Germany knew most about it. At the time Of the
Fashoda incident the army not ready. When
Delcasse blufed Germany Morocco it not
ready. France does not know when it will be ready
It is fair supposition that it will be ready
long France is ruled by senators and deputies
who live at ten times their income and retire
milonaires to give way to another set Of statesmen
who are just as eager as their predecessors to give
France peace and themselves profit
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03
Politics and Whisky.

1T is said that the saloonkeepers Of Chicago came
together one year after the city had entertained
both the republican and democratic national
tions and tried to determine which one had been
the better for the liquor interests" One dealer
closed the debate by saying it very plain to him
that the republican convention had been the more
profitable because the democrats took bigger drinks.
This discussion Of comparative irrigation areas
of the two national parties not entirely whimsi
cal. A few years ago whisky cut more Of figure in
our politics than knew would have cared to
acknowledge had we known. Candidates for presi-
dent we're helped their way indirectly by whisky
judiciously administered. Candidates for local Of
fees had no Intermediates; they were expected to
go .'down the ne,' that is make the rounds Of the
saloons and treat everybody in sight; They were
taught also to provide kegs for chosen collections Of
electors, ~whe werethus@ sweetened to the point Of
@"working.'' f|FEHf @*IE.%5 fs+&. %%f~t~-.
= If candidates visited a saloon accompanied by
personal thirst it was bad form bad politics for
him to leave without having "blown off, every.
tramp or transient present. It made difference
that he did not know them-the barkeeper knew him.
*. Nominating conventions customarily held
contiguous to selected hosteries; campaign COM
mittees established themselves within easy reach Of
a refectory where the service was good, and the
chairman usually warmed up lukewarm partizans in
the rear room of the saloon. Sometimes the chair
man had secret interest in the place and thus
perienced double glow Of joy when he led a candi-
date to the bar s+ ~ s"* T. H.. .1s@..s's
Is the saloon playing out political force?
Will it sometime be possible to conduct campaigns
without the creation of those unnatural thrss which
arise from heated anxiety for the safety Of ones
country? Distressing evidences Of the growth of a
chilly and despicable brand of politics abroad
Last year in Illinois it was triumphanty charged
that the support Of Mr.. iDeneen the kind that
was never known Ito buy" Yet Mr. Deneen was
nominated and elected. This year prohibitonist
running on the democratic ticket was elected by the
republicans treasurer of Pennsylvania Formerly it
was impossible to construct democratic platform
without protest against 'sumptuary legislation, -
but year ago the democrats Of Missouri elected a
governor who has said that the Sunday saloon must
go, merely because it IS contrary to law.
. Is the bottle played out? Has red liquor lost it's
potentiality in politics? Is the goodfellow candi-
date with the greatest capacity for drinks to sue
cumb to the Snug aspirantS with no backing but his
capacity for business What is politics coming to
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03
PUBLISHED EVERY DAY
Getting Around the Mayor.

u SIDE from the merits of the controversy over
- the incandescent street lamps the mayor
would be justified IN refusing to sign a contract
which he has had no adequate opportunity to pass
upon. Had the contract been awarded by resolution
it would have come to the mayors desk in such
shape that he might sign veto it as his best judg
ment dictated. The council, by awarding the con
tract by merely adopting the report OF committee
says there is nothing before the mayor
The charter prescribes that the mayor must sign
all contracts made by and for the city 1t is ques
ton which has never been decided whether he can
legally refuse to affix his signature to a contract
which has been thru the council. It would be but
courtesy then for the council to permit the mayor
at least as much opportunity as themselves to pass
Judgment a matter involving as many city dollars
as does this gas contract. ess$
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03
Enforcing the Labor Laws.

- HE labor commissioner Of Minnesota has re-
= Gently stirred public interest by threat to
arrest the Sunday school superintendent who con-
nive at children speaking pieces at Christmas enter
tainments. The commissioner has said he would
not arrest any church or Sunday school except on
complaint, but what church or school is immune
from complaint? It is known that all children do
not appear on the Sunday school programs. Pupils
are chosen by the teachers It is also known that in
the opinion Of many parents the wrong pupil is
chosen. Now, what is to prevent the parents of
children whose undoubted talent for defamation has
been coldly overlooked from making complaint?
And when complaint is made how shall the com
missioner escape from his duty to prevent the Eek
hibition Of children " contrary to the statutes in
such case made and provided?
Imagine the nervous tension Of the coming
Christmas festival. The member Of Glass A is re-
citing with graphic gestures
8 Twas the night before Christmas =
The reindeer are on the roof; their footbeats are
clearly heard The sound comes nearer it is clearer,
deadlier than before Tt has changed its note It
is like human hoofsteps and not polite ones, either
The noise is longer the roof it is at the DOORS
at the windows, everywhere. II breaks thru walls
and doors; it finds a voice in the hoarse cry of
s. Hands up! IS, The commissioner and posse have
arrested the whole church.
s##ss$ Well, it was about time The night before
Christmas got thirty days.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03
THE REAL ISSUE.

There are two reasons, after all
Above the that speech may call
Or of wisdom utter;
Two issues that with me and you
Are most important land the two
Are bread and butter.
Let patriotic banners wave,
Let economic speakers rave;
IT'S not potential
That art proclaim and music sing
The loaf is after all, the thing
That IS most essential.
Truth seeks some broader. meeting place :;
For breed clan tribe or race, 81
For saint or sinner;
But after all the noise and fuss
The issue paramount with us
Is-What for dinner.
New theories we may evolve,
Old governments we may dissolve,
New flags float 'er us,
And truth may search and wisdom think,
Still those two planks of meat and drink
Are yet before us.
So let contention hotly wage.
And let the wars of logic rage
In discourse fretted;
When all the clamor is complete
The issue still is what to eat
And how to get It'll
y. W. Foley.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03
KEEPING CHURCH DOORS OPEN.

Rev W. S. Ransford, of New York, holds that
church door should hardly eyer be closed. IT was
not always keen for open churches he confessed
recently, 'ebut 4yearold girl settled my mind on
childish prattle when passed tightly closed and
locked church. I pose God has key to let Him
self IN, she remarked, looking thoughtfully at the
barred door, but the people have to go to the
sexton -. #--.es.r". ~ s-s&
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03

Mark Twain denies that he has ever done days
work IN his life. He has written some things but
writing is such a joy to man Of his imagination
'hae IL ooes not count What he is that he has
never put on storm windows shoveled sidewalks
or built fires. No wonder he is 20 wears young and
becoming more cotish every year
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03
THE PROPER ENCOURAGEMENT.
Boston Globe.

Praise goes good way with most men, and some
stop there; but cash goes long way further If you
want to keep your growing men with you, says the
head OF large business, you must not expect them
to do all the growing. Small salaries make small
workers and careless workers.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03
WRITE 1NcLos1Ne STAMP, TO CARNEGIE
Kansas CITY Star.

contract has been let in Spain by the terms of
which steel rails manufactured in that country are
to furnish railroad in California, the delivery
price, in spite of marine freight anu the enormous
tariff being ST per ton less than the cost of American
rails Who reaps the profit American steel rails
Is it invested in milk for the infant industries9
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03
AND NO BILLS EITHER
Kansas City Journal.

Kansas City Journal
Dr. E. Benjamin Andrews suggests that condemned
murderers be turned to the doctors TO try their
theories on with the promise that they shall be free
'Sif they survive In other words, condemned MUIR
derers should have the same chance with the doctors
as regular patients have. -..,
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03
1 A PIGsKIN CAMEO.

Upon the turf in iendish glee
AS if they d kick their toes off,
They gouge, and, not infrequently,
An eye out or a nose off.
And as they scramble, scoot or scud;
AL mangled, banged and battered,
And fly in savage cohorts, mud
Embroidered and despatched,
We from their rough and tumble whiz
While one another goring,
Learn why the wayback college is
More scored against than scoring.
ii. PUCK
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03

When the disorders broke out in Vladivostok the
three russian cruisers in the harbor lifted anchor and
sailed away The Russian naval officers know that it
IS better to be wrong on top of the water than right
at the bottom of the bav E@<. = .--.r +.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03

Baptist minister in Cleveland has aroused a
storm by his public declaration that beer is better for
man than dyspepsia-breeding apple dumplings
great many men who are not religious feel the same
way. .@H~
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03
CRADLE PEssIMIsM.

Atchison Globe ...- ~ -
It is uncommon thing to the stork work
overtime delivering little white bundles at homes.
where neither parent has enough intelligence take
care of a rag doll
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03

rich Indiana farmer is using his automobile ss+o
pump water and run his sheller.'' An automo
bile used in this way to the Old Ladies
Home. ...- a- u.. j.. '.5-
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03

England is about to exchange one Scotch ruler for
another. The coming one is said to be hot Scotch.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03

The Press Humorssts' association ought to pension
MARX Twain and retire him from the wear and tear
{ OF living up to great reputation.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03

Governor Davis of Arkansas is RAPIDLY acouir;no
national distinction the hero of defeat The
police courts now fine citizens only a dollar for
assaulting the governor -...-
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03

Ii you can get thru Christmas financially you are
likely to pull thru the rest Of the year. 'I
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03

In his latest poem Edwin Markham cheerfuly
sings, tThou art the wind and the lyre.' Most
poets stretch it a little. 81 "..s."
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03

The presidents train to Princeton contained
car set apart for Secretary Taft That Taft IS a
growing man. -. :.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03

Mr.. Vandiver of Missouri should not say some of
the things ne says without seeing Mr. Lawson about
the copyright.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03

The Sultan Of Turkey from stand patter has been
converted to a moderate revisionist .....
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03
CARELESS OF MONEY.
Detroit News

That New York dentist who charged Prince Louis
$1,000 for filing four teeth must have been accustomed
to treating insurance officers.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03
PERSUASION GOES.
Atchison Glob,

If it is father who argues the children out of bed
IN the morning instead Of mother, they get up good
deal quicker.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03

Yale college is strong incentive to football peace
in the east by having many football battleships
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03
"THE BIG sTICK''-NEY.
Kansas CITY Star

President Stickney, of the Great Western railway
who lndorses President Roosevelt s rate demands ma
become known as the Big Stickney
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03

~, Senator Penrose says that he favors reform!
Whoop! ID RI ~ III. ..*. ~. +.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03
STARS AS HIGH ROLLERS.
Boston Globe

Talk about htching your wagon to star! Some
men find it too expensive to hitch an automobile to
DIR
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03

Will it never endq Graft is to be in the next
dictionary. ~@@ s: r-".
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03

There is but one place where America would be
glad to lose ground At Panama. Guessed it the
first time.
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03
With the Long BosD
Eye natures walks. shoot folly as IT flies.

Postofice Having Trouble with Frosted Boxes
Due to the Damp Cold-No Holiday Sales
of Stamps This Year Except in the Case Of
One Batch on Which the Mucilage Was
Chilled-Of These, Thirteen Are Offered
for a Quarter for Short Time Only. IS
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03

Two LIE Sueur hunters making use of squirrel:
extractor The News says that John Vegei and Anton
Durenberger the champion squirrel hunters. Anton
climbs the trees and with of George Kings patent
squirrel extractors pulls the squirrels out OF the hole
and holds them up in the air for John to shoot,
The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-12-03

Barren island is a bank of sand the front
to the south Of Brooklyn. As it was a mile or two
from the mainland the place became one where gar
bage was carried for the purpose of working it
to commercial uses The results were not odorous,
and whenever the sea airs swept over Barren and
moved on to Brooklyn they were laden with a noise
that recalled the Chicago stockyards Tt was then
that people held their noses and wished the island
would sink. So strong is the power of thought that
end Of the island dropped into the Atlantic the
other day and started for Cuba It is feared that
4 the whole island will go.
The Washington times., 1905-03-12

opportunity 10 compare his conception
CT this character with those Of other
eminent actors who have assumes it.
IN addition he viii be seen in a number
Of his familiar plays. such as Bean
BrunneI. "A Partisan Romance. and
Or. JekylI and Mr.. Hyde.
OTIS Skinner Brings to the Columbia his
newest ard what IS heraIded as his pest
3fering-t-Tae Harvester. In il he as
sumes the role Of a rowing gypsy. ana it
Is said that this part gives him full
sway for showing himself at his very
best in poetic and idyi lic situations. He
Is surrounded BY a capable company and
his play gives great opportunities for
picturesque stage settings and costume
ing
At chasess there will be Albert Cheva-
lier, reputed the greatest OF character
comedians, and the usual attractive list
of vaudeville offerings Nancy Brown
comes TO The Lafayette. and The Queen
O. the White Slaves" returns to the
4tc,tdemy, while the Jolly Grass
Widows will hold forth at the Lyceurn.
The moving pictures will be seen at the
Academy again this evening.
The Washington times., 1905-03-12
At the Theaters.
New Northumberland manshelds

New Richard Manshelds
\ dramatic festival is in store for
Washington this week when Richard
Mansfield is TO appear here in round
OF his most celebrated productions. A
special train of eleven cars will bring
the star. his company of lo6 people and
all the scenery, properties hangings,
arraof. ard other paranhernalia for the
elaborate production OF Ivan the Terri
BILE Beau BruInfI1ei.. . Partisan
Romance, king Richard III. and
.sI1r. JekyH and Mr.. Hyde" This is the
largest dramatic organization and the
most extensive scenic equipment which
has eyer been taken or kpur, and only
The largest stages la America can re-
eeipe 1t.
This season Mr.. Mansfield has mar
sllaIed what is probably the greatest
repertoire ever given 10 the people OF
this country and he has chosen from il
six OF his greatest successes and most
pretentioas productions. lie IS. of
eougae. 10 be seen in fis creation the
Tar Ivan IN Ivan the Terrible. the
Russian historical tragedy by Count
Alexis Tolstoy This WAS accredited last
year with being the finest piece Of act
ing tie stage has seen.
Ia Richard III" the sssions.
court scenes, ana pattle scenes are g1Ven
with distinguished elaboration. Other
features Of Mr.. MansfeIs's week here
are reyivals Of .seau Brummel." Baron
CheNriai in - Partisan Romance and
DR.. JeKyli and Mr.. Hyde
Mansfield comes to the New National
ana tomorrow evening win give sor the
first time in Washington, his great per-
iofmanee OF the Tzar Ivan in Ivan the
Terrible 'Reau Brummef' will be
given on Tuesday EVENING Wednesday
evening Ivan the Terrible will be re-
peated. On Thursday evening he viii
be seen as the Baron CnevriaI In "A
Partisan Romance Mansfield will
play King Richard III on Friday night.
Beau BfnElmei VIII be given at the
Saturday matinee and DIR. Jeykil and
AgT. Hyde Saturday night.
few of the leading artists In the
com IsseIg are Eleanor Barry. Julia Marie