davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1905-01-19

II. c. Barnabee, the veteran actor.
lay disabled from a fall and listened
to the condolences of dramatic critic.
For years and years." the writer
said, you haven't missed perform
ance, Now, here you lie. helpless as a
corpse
'As helpless as a corpse" said Mr..
Barnabee, ''or as helpless as two inc
briates of whom l heard the other day.
"These two men had dined together
and after dinner had sat too long over
their coffee, their liquor their brandy
and so on. When it came time for them
to go home they were in a very bad
way, helpless, in fact They leaned
on one another, going with linked
arms, but each. as a reed to lean on,
was rotten.
Finally they fell, and, with loud
splash they rolled into a full gutter.
A police officer appeared and grabbed
the upper man by the collar.
"'No, no. Save my friend Never
mind me. 7 can swim San Antonio
Express.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1905-01-19
Sublime
Glory OF
American
Liberty

our American list of things be proud we have one
which is superior to that possessed by ANY OTHER
nation in the present in the past 1t is American liberty
American liberty has quality which no republic pos
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1905-01-19

In our big fire at winter quarters one
of the best lions got free and took ref
uge in Il barn, writes Samuel Hopkins
Adams in McClure's. The inhabitating
COW said something to him that he
didn't like, and the lion killed her. Out
came the woman of the house with a
bale stick and sailed into the lion. Be
ing the king of beasts, the intruder
was scared almost to death, because
his assailant was not afraid at all. At
the first blow he retreated, snarling,
into the dimmest corner. The woman's
husband arrived with Il gun and fired
several shots into the darkness. Re
suit, he destroyed q piece of property
worth hundreds of dollars. when by
merely shutting the barn door he
would have kept the animal perfectly
harmless until we could have got to
him. Presently the trainer came hur-
rying up.
Have you seen anything of a lion in
your barn."
Lion screeched the woman. Il
thought it was a dog"
Over she went in dead faint and cut
her head open. What does the husband
do but want damages for her injuries
and that after killing our high priced
animal Well. he didn't get any dam
ages
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1905-01-19

to conceal the rancidity of the grease
used as a foundation.
Ransom. TO whom the process of max
ing up was not new. submitted to the
heavy applications of paint and powder
and hurried back to the stage TO SUI
perintend the final preparations.
Presently Kittie emerged from her
dressing room, and he went toward her.
She shrank from him Whilc size knew
that makeup was required. she WAS
not accustomed to seeing men with
paint on their faces. and there was
something oddly repulsive in the ap-
pearance Of this man with his heavily
lined eyebrows, rouged cheeks and
whitened temples. 1t seemed ike Il
CHASTITY mask of the man she knew.
like the badly painted portrait of an
acquaintance.
She could scarcely listen to his eX-
pressions of penitence at the loss of
his temper the night before AMI hailed
with positive relief her own call to the
makeup room.
The daIkening Of her eyebrows and
lashes, the reddening of lips and checks
and u dash of powder We're all that she
required, and she escaped from the
chair, glad that no more was needed
During the first act the excitement
Of playing was too great to permit her
to turn her attention to other thoughts.
She could not permit her mind to be
diverted for an instant from her next
speech, the next move across the stage
With the second act came greater
confidence. 1t was here that the love
scenes commenced, but they did not
seem the same as at rehearsal. She
could not endure the touch of this
man, with his paint covered features
and the penetrating odOr of bergamot
heavy almost to nausea, sickened her
nostrls. The scene was like a night
mare. Even worse was the last act
with its powerful closing scene. The
touch of his greasy lips upon her check,
the unnatural look of the eyes made
brilliant by the dark circles of crayon.
startled her, and before the curtain
rang down she felt that she should
scream.
Leaving the stage after the last ia
bleau, Ransom caught her hand.
Cant you forgive last night, Kitty,
and make the yes you have just spo-
ken your answer to the question have
wanted to ask for so long?"
She tore her hand from his grasp.
Don't you dare to speak to me like
that she painted. IF you do not let
me go. | shall call Mr.. Torrington'
Ransom threw a black look ut Tor
rington. who was placidly gathering
up small stage furnishings, dropped
her hand and turned away. Kittie
turned back to the stage. and Jimmie's
honest, Imprinted face never seemed
so cherubic.
"Jimmie," she asked softly, do you
want to take me home again tonght:"
"Do II" repeated Torrington I'd
like to take You 10 a home of our own,
Kittie."
She smiled demurely. 81 think you
may she said.
That night Jimmie Torrington adj
dressed his shaggy terrier. "Wriggles, "
he said solemnly, when you find in
your canine walk of life a lady dog
you love be wise. If she looks with
favor OH a sleeker coated puppy you
just get that puppy to run Il dog show
It's Il sure cure"
And Wriggles blinked an approving
eye.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1905-01-19
LEW SHORT STORIES
En- EIish Hrunor.

Charlie; NJ. Pepper. the uev'so:.er
man who WIS appointed a comia.-' on
err on tie intorrontineltal H.. 10y
commission. tells RI amusing story. il
which the main figure is Henry -'or-
man. the British journalist N0rmJn
visited Washington few years ago.
One evening just before the depIr-
ture Of the Britisher it was determined
to put up joke on him ut the Press
club. \ Mr. Decker WAS selected to be
the perpetrdtor. This gentleman arose
in his seat and. taking Il small bell
from bis pocket, addressed Mr.. Nor
man as follows:
"Sir. | have been designated by my
fellow members to convey to you an
expression Of our pleasure. On behalf
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1905-01-19
Varying Estimates of Goodness
BY LILLIAN RUSSELL. operate Star

n VOODNESS- beauty-wisdom And the GREATEST Of
" these for woman is WISDOM
49, Goodness such a comparative term 1t is so much
difficult TO who good +boo +o SOW u-Lo l
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1905-01-19
Dodging the Dangers OF Heredity.

lodging tDe hangers or Hereulty.
Mrs. Simpson has Il profound belief
in the doctrine of heredity as she I'M
derstood it. Mrs. Simpson is colored
She washes for living. A few years
ago her husband passed away, not by
death or divorce, but by the simple
process Of abandonment He left her
to support a little daughter, who is Il
bright child.
what is your little girls name?"
asked one OF Mrs. Simpsons patrons
the other day
"Helen," replied Susan.
"Oh, indeed! Named after some Of
your relatives|
"Waal, no. l kinder liked the name
mahself. But dat amt what l called
her fust."
"No?"
mo. Fust she was chris ned Anna
Cornelia after a pusson what was Il
particular friend OBJ mine at dat time,
but me an dat pusson had trouble aft
err dat, an anyhow she TUX to drink, so
I jes' changed dat chile's name fear
she might inherit it"-New York Press.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1905-01-19

when Is superior to that possessed by ANY OTHER
nation in the present in the past 1t American liberty
-2 American liberty has a quality which no republic DOS
seed IN ancient medieval modern times The struggle
of people be free has been going Christ declared for
the equality and the freedom of mankind but strong
steel caspd mbreakab the shackes Of and
OF PRIVILEGE that for nearly thousand wears the struggle
for liberty in country the struggle FOR THE LIBERTY
OF THE FEW.
The republics Of Italy only republics and died
because they did have the spark to keep alive their
buttons Runymede glorious and the principles Magma Carta
the charter of liberty but the time unciated # was
only liberty FOR THE BARONS The Poles under Kocusko
and the Magyars under Kossu the Holanders William of
Orange and the English Cromwell did not fight for the liberties
which WE understand and enjoy
The pilgrims Plymouth rock were the real evouons and
the real rebels against British authority kgy rule ana state
church The charter framed in the of the Aavoe with
Its declaration of Just and equal rights the dynamite has
blown thrones, broken the AND DESTROYED
THE POWER OF PRIVILEGE 1t the germ which, under
the hand of Jefferson lowered into Declaration of independence
TO THE REsIsTLEss FORCE OF THAT MAYFLowER UTTER
ANcE OF 1920 ALL MEN BEFORE THE LAW
CoRN"AlLIS SURRENDERED HIS SWORD YORKTOWN AND
LEE AT APPoMATTox.
The philosophers of the French revolution thought they under
stood liberty but they med by idea that every man
absolutely at liberty do he wishes; that he has surrendered
certain of his naenab the and in certain con-
tingencies, may take them back
That Is not AMERICAN liberty. That false doctrine
Cain believed that when he killed Abel But in the family Of Adam
the liberty of every child liberty the best and high
est destiny possible, WITH A DUE REGARD TO THE
RIGHTS OF EVERY OTHER MEMBER OF THE FAMILY
Nothing surrendered because nothing ever granted to any
man who wronged his neighbour We live in period when il orr
pride to say-and it the truhat nation is free from
pr and dangers of kind than has been other period
of its existence.
nation that has uprooed slavery nation that has ,rottl
anarchy nation that has bankruptcy riser u
PhanY INTO financial integrity need fear peril for the future
HAVE NO PATIENCE WITH THE WEAK kNEEp SPINDLE
sHANkED HOLLOW sToMAcHED, DRAINED AND SPIRIT
LOGGED CREATURES WHO THIS REPUBLIC
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1905-01-19
Doctors Advice.

as my husbands case serious, doc
Aor?"
at is very grave, madam. l have
left an opiate."
Glow often shall l give it to him:"
"He needs absolute rest and quiet
Don't give it to him. Take it your
self"-ColIiers
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1905-01-19
He nurned WOOd

There is an old negro down in my
town." said John Sharp Williams,
who did me a service, and l wanted
to reward him, so l said:
Uncle, which shall give you, a
ton of coal or Il bottle of whisky?
"'Foah de Lawd, MaSsa john he re-
piled. you all shorely knows | burn
wood >"
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1905-01-19
Senntor Horny Enigrnm.

The late Senator Hoar said of his
dead friend, the late Senator Davis of
Minnesota, mo spark from his train
was ever a clnder in the eye of
friend"
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1905-09-15
Listening to the Fishes.

For listening to the noise made by
fishes in the depths of the seas, a Nor
wegian inventor has devised a telephone
to be lowered overheard from fishing
boats. With this he claims a fisherman
can detect the presence of fish, their
numbers and even their kind. Herrings,
or smaller fish, when they come in large
numbers, make piping, whistling
sound, while cod make roaring noise
When they come close to the submarine
telephone the movements of the indi-
vidual fish can be distinguished. TIL.
instrument consists of a microphone
in hermetically-sealed steel box. It
is connected by electric wires with a
telephone in the vessel above. Every
sound in the water below is intensified
by the microphone and conducted bv
the electric wires to the telephone
Stray Stories.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1905-09-15
THE WAITER WAS CURIOUS.
Poked His Hand Into Bag Of MCrab-
! ~. Apples" with Disastrous -.
Result.

-Four men,, two of them carrying big
potato sack between them, walked into
the Hotel Vendig cafe, at Twelfth and
Market streets, shortly before closing time
the other night, and sat down. at one sof
the tables. The bag was carefully de-
poslted IN q corner, relates tha Philadel-
A German waiter took the order with
one eye on the sack. Finally his Gu
rioslty got the better of him. s4=
..vd Dot ;: q big bag, amt it?''he said.
"Apples, Fritz" said one Of the. men.
Take MI some home to the children.
The waiter accepted the invitation and
plunged his hand into the sack. He
brought it out again in hurry. with a
hard-shell crab clinging to o''e of his
T wo hundred brothers and sisters of the
first crab promptly took advantage of The
open mouth OF the bag to crawl to lib
erty. They backed out of the sack with
= rush and took possession of the cafe,
nlpplng everything in reach. Several
held fast.
Heroic walters made sortie with
brooms and swept the crustaceans back
into the bag and tied it up securely.
Say, please" demanded the German
waiter, sucking vigorously at his injured
finger, "vot kind Of abbles do you call
"Crab-apples," said the four men, in
chorus.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1905-09-15

FREE-DON'T MISS THIS.
A Cure for Stomach Trouble-A New
Method, by Absorption
No Drugs.
Do You Belch?

Do You Belch? =" ~
It means a diseased Stomach. Are you
afflicted with Short Breath, Gas, Sour
Fluctuations, Heart Pains, Indigestion, Dys-
pepsia, Burning Pains and Lead Weight
in Pit Of Stomach, Acid Stomach, Dis
tended Abdomen, Dizziness, Collie.
Bad Breath or Any Other Stomach
Torture?
Let US send you box of Mull's Anti
Belch Wafels free to convince you that
it cures.
Nothing e].e like it known. It's sure
Harmless. 10 Drugs sto%ach 0SG %rouble
can't be cured otherwise--so says Medical
Science. Drugs won't do-they eat up
the Stomach and make you worse.
We know Mull's Anti-Belch Waters cure
and we want you to know it, hence this
offer.
of Mull's Anti=Belch Waters is soc box,
but to introduce it to thousands of suffer-
erss we will send two l2) boxes upon re-
ceipt of 75c and this advertisement, or we
will send you sample tree tor this coupon.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1905-09-15
HOW IL, TELLA STATESMAN!
Not Only Z Man Who Makes Speeches,
: E But Man Who Makes *ss
I Good Ones. - :

. The late Horatio G. Herrick, Of Law.
renee, for many years high sheriff of Es..
sex county, always took keen, interest
in the Lawrence schools, and was for a
long time chairman of the school commit
tee. Visiting the Saunders school soon:
after the death Of Garfield, relates the
Boston Herald, Sheriff Herrick spoke
to the pupils Of the life Of the late
distinguished statesman, and thus asked,
genially: Ss, .* ...z '-:@.sS3 =. -
Nov, can any Of you tell me what !
statesman is .z:.,,@ III
4 little hand went up, and little sirl
"A statesman is a. mans,.swho makes
'pSsf Hardiv that answered Mr.. Herr;ck
who loved to tell this story. 'For instance,
l sometimes make speeches, and yet am
not statesman" -.
The little hand again went up, and the
answer came, triumphantly:
Il know; statesman is Z man who
makes good speeches!" XII
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1905-09-15
A CLEAR COMPLEXION
A Simple Home Treatment for Black
heads, Red, Rough and Oily Skin
and Disfiguring Humors.

If you are afflicted with pimples, black
heads, red, rough or oily skin, or dishg-
pring 'humors, you will find this simple
effective and economical. Gently smear
the face with the great emollient skin
cure cure, Cuticura Ointment, but do not rub.
Wash off the ointment in five minutes
with Cuticura Soap and hot water, and
battle freely. Repeat this morning and
evening and you will soon, be rewarded
with a skin soft, white and clear. Cuti-
cura Soap, the best toilet and complexion
soap in the world, assisted by Cuticura
Ointment, will preserve, purify and
beautify the complexion and keep che
skin. in a healthy condition, prevent
ing blackheads, pimples,. eruptions or the
return of eczema and other skin troubles.
Used as shampoo it cleanses the scalp
of crusts and scales, removing dandruff
and promoting the growth of the hair.
For red, rough hands, itching palms and
painful finger ends, Cuticura Soap and
Ointmen INT achieve marvellous results, often
in a single night.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1905-09-15

nobility, as he could run things all
right without any help, and dad got
ready to go, cause the atmosphere was
getting sort of chilly, but the emperor
soon got over his huff, and told dad
not to hurry, and then he turned to me
and said, Nov, little American bad
boy, what kind of trick are you 20
ing to play on me, cause from what
have read of you l know you will
never go out of this house without
giving me benefit, and all my boys
expect it, and will enjoy it, the same
as will; now let or CO."
I felt that it was up to me to dc
something to maintain the reputation
I had made, SO said, your majesty.
I will now proceed to make it inter-
esting for you, if you and the BOYS
will kindly be seated in a circle
around me-" They got into a circle.
all laughing, and I took out of nv
pistol pocket half pint flask of glass.
covered with leather, and with a stop
per that opened by touching spring,
and walked around in front of each
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1905-09-15
Sure Cure at Last.

Monticello, Miss, Sept. Especially
Lawrence County is almost daily in re-
ceipt of fresh evidence that sure cure
for all Kidney Troubles has at last been
found, and that cure Is Dodd's Kidney
Pills.
Among those who have reason to bless
the Great American Kidney Remedy is
Mrs. L. E. Baggett, of this place; Mrs.
Baggett had dropsy. Dodd's Kidney
Pills cured her.
81 was troubled with my Kidneys
Mrs. Baggett says in recommending Dodd's
Kidney Pills to her friends, my urine
would hardly pass: The Boe g3 sa :doi l.
Pills as. directed, and am now we'll
woman"
Dodd's Kidney Pills cure the kidneys.
Cured Kidneys strain all the impurities
out of the blood. That means pure blood
and q sound, energetic body. Dodd's
Kidney Pills are the greatest tonic the
world has ever known.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1905-09-15

one ofathe royal family, mumbling,
"Ene-mene-mony-my," and opening the
flask in front of each one, and pretty
soon they ell began to get nervous,
and scratch themselves, and the en-
peror slapped his leg and pinched his
arm and put his fingers down his collar
and scratched his neck, and the crown
prince jumped up and kicked his leg
and scratched his back, and said
"say, kid, you are not hypnotizing us,
are you," and said, "Ene-mene-
mony-my," and kept on touching the
stoppes
BY and by they all got to scratching,
and the emperor turned sort of pale,
but he was going to see the show
through to the end, as long as he had
ticket, and he said, what is the
joke, anyway" and I kept on saying
"Ene-mene-mony-my," and walking
around in front Of them, and dad be-
gan to dance around, too, and dig
under his shirt bosom and scratch his
leg, and they all scratched in uni
son and laughed, and little prince
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1905-09-15

The Splendid Passenger Service Of
the Nickel Plate Road
has become popular because of the care
and attention shown patrons of this line.
ance on both LIST and End class passengers.
Ladies travelling alone or accompanied
by children are shown special attention.
Excellent Dining and Sleeping Car Serv'
ice, and no excess fares charged on any
train. All trains depart from La Sale
Street Station, Chicago. For full in.
formation regarding tickets, rates, routes
sleeping car space, etc., call on or address
J. Y: Callahan, General Agent, Ill Adams
St., Chicago.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1905-09-15
The Bad Boy Finds Germany Very
Much Like Milwaukee-He Plays
Mumblety Peg with the German
Princes-He Entertains the Royal
Family with "a Trick"

BY HON. GEORGE w. PECK.
(Ex-Goyernor Of Wisconsin, Former Editor
or Peck's Sun, Author of "Peck's
Bad Boy" Etc.)
Copyright, 1905, by Joseph B. Bowles.)
Berlin, Germany.-My Dear Old
Pummernickel.-Now we have got
pretty near home, and you would en-
Joy it to be with us, because you
couldn't tell this town from Milwaukee,
except for the military precision with
which everything is conducted, where
you never take glass of beer without
cracking your heels together like SOL
der, and giving military salute to
the bartender, who is the commander
in-chief of all who happen to patronize
his bar, everybody here acts like he
was at picnic in the woods, with a
large barrel of beer with perspiration
oozing down the outside, and a spigot
of the largest size,. which fills a
schooner at one turn of the wrist, and
every man either smiles or laughs out
loud, and you feel as though there
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1905-09-15

AND SCRATCHED.
asked how long before they would
know what it was all about, and l said
my ene-mene, aud looked solemn, and
dad said, What you giving u.s. and
l said, Never you mind, this is my
show and 1 am the whole push" and
everybody had raised up out of his
chair and each was scratching for all
that was out, and finally the emperor
said, Il like joke as we'll as any
body, but l can't laugh until l know
what l am laughing about" and he
told dad to make me show what was
in the bottle, and showed the bottle
and there was nothing in it, and there
they stood scratching themselves, and
I told dad we better excuse ourselves
and go, and we were going all right
enough when lad said, What is it
you are doing" and as we got almost
to the door 1 said, Your majesty,
have distributed, impartially, l trust,
in the royal family of Germany, half
a pint of the hungriest fleas that Egypt
can produce, for they have been in
that flask three weeks with nothing to
eat except themselves, and l estimate
that there were million Cairo f1eas
in the flask, enough to set up house
keeping in your palace, with enough to
stock the palace of your crown prince
when he is married, and this is that
YOU may remember the visit of Peck's
Rad Row and h.S dad
The emperor was mad at first, but
he laughed, and when we got out of
the palace dad leaned against a lamp
post and scratched his back, and said
to me, "Hennery, you never ought to
have did it," and / said, What could
a poor boy do when called upon sud-
denly to do something to entertain roy
alty?"
WELL" says dad, II don't care for
myself, but this thing is apt to bring
on international complications" and I
said, Eyes, it will bring Persia into it.
cause they will have to use Persian
insect powder 10 get rid Of them," and
then we went to our hotel and fought
fleas all night, and thought of the
sleepless night the royal family were
having.
Well, so long, old Pummernickel.
Yours truly,
HENNERY.