New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1905-04-29
THE Talk or THE DAY.

porfa (&an) Gazette to take his toWnSpeople into
his confidence regarding some of his domestic ar
rangements. He was accused Of keeping wine in
his cellar, and he thus resents the charge: This Is
a malicious and unspeakable falsehood. The liquor
is kept in the pantry, between the dining room and
the kitchen. Why not tell the truth? 1t Is also
alleged that the Editor Of The Gazette has the
govt caused by high living Yesterday for dinner
he had home picked sourdock, mustard, dandeliOn.
horseradish and beet top greens, boiled bacon and
potatoes bread and onions. Would you call
that high lving?'
BALLADE OF THE AVENUE
There's enchantment in the air:
Winter-tide has lost It's sting;
Seems the minstrel wind to sing:
Swallows dart on dipping wing
q the dS0y sla aGCSSs Of 5He the Sus Stirring
Up and down the Avenuei
In the sunlight there's snare:
Every fetter far fling;
Who said Garcia ig for care,
With the world a,merryingi
We have quaffed Hopes heady brew;
the glamour OF the spring
Up and down the AvenueI
Beaux and belles-hOw many a pair
Caught by Cupid's leading-stringl
Coaches with their blithe fanfare:
Horses gayly curyeting;
the glamour of the spring
Up and down the Avenue!
Envoy.
All love- Ife's a winsome thing
When I wander out with yOus
In the glamour Of the spring
-(Clinton Scotland. in Life.
The annual May Day parade of the Russian I'M
perial Guard in the presence Of the Emperor on
the Champ de Mars has been abandoned this year.
In view Of what is taking place the real Champ
de Mars in Manchuria the decision seems to be
wise
How is your guardian on diplomacy? Do you
think that he can understand the finer points Of a
II can answer that question for myself said a
sudden voice. II am in favor of an open door pol
Cincinnati Commercial-Trfbune.
The Malta Bend Out vive' is responsible for this
one: q" The sun never sets on the Missouri mule
proudly exclaimed Governor Folk. No. and very
few people who have mistaken the beast for q
saddle horse have been able to-
ANOTHER QUEER CALLING.
For Women)
IA law has Just been passed in Wisconsin providing
only males the those
get married. and failed Manchester Guardian
Biddy oBride was poor ola maid
Hawker of apples and nuts by trade,
Wrinked. crinkled far from young,
Short in the temper am and long in ina the tongue
And poofer a8d p 90 e s She eq greW
I'm she ar had get 5a from day to day.
One night she heard in the Shamrock Inn
Wilful bachelors who declined
To marry a girl must all Oe fined;
M M1s to 0 s4eG to G @aFFg maid z
Who has this day rejected me-
A beautiful living in Wisconsin!
Il a man can show he has bin an, , axed -
So she bade the Emerald Isle adieu
0 seeE month sSTce ras S ere her name was
In the offer of marriage refusing trade.
Biddy O'Bride is poor no more;
Fair men, dark men. short men long men;
Men Of the highest social rank,
with cosey balances at the bank
i |" beat Penelope the fair grass wildly"
At times her feelings are sorely wrung;
When wooers are especially nice ana young.
Fam would she deal ,S STGel pl o{ NO.
From the bachelor clients Of Wisconsin.
Of 7f' healing Ealing the wounds in human heart
So she sits in her office resigned and more
DeclininE proposals from 10 10 l.
During twenty-five years Of married life a couple
who recently arrived at Naples from Zanzibar have
had thirty three children. twenty-seven OF whom
are still alive. During the voyage, says the Mat
tino" the family occupied eight cabins. with three
berths in each.
The Time for nce.-Bridegroou-Weu. that
umbrella Is gone and I'll have 10 get another one
Wen stop into Bigg, Store Co.'S
Bride-Horrors no Go TO some little shop on a
Dear me! Why?''
NV darling let's not spend our honeymoon wait
ing for change. "-(New-Nork Weekly.
Ten students at the Ohio State University are
credited with smoking 5000 cigarettes during the
college year of eight and half months. Getting
a higher educa ton is becoming very arduOus en-
terprise.
Judge Sylvester Dana, who was for some years
Judge Of the police court in Concord ", H. aiwayS
eudeavored 70 smooth over any little difference ~
tween persons brought before him. On one occasion
the charge for technical assault. and II came
ont in the OF the evidence that the DartIes
were neghbors and had been on the best Of terms
for some years.
"It is a great pity" said the judge. that OLD
friends. as you seem TO have been. ahOuld appear
before me In such a way. Surely this Is a case
which might be settled out OF eOurt?'