The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-09-23
A HONEYMOON CONVERSATION
The Wrong Side Of the Mother IN La.u Question
BY he,en Rowland Copyrights 1906 by Helen Irene Lutz.
nOLLY fingered the lavender not
and looked at ma narYouslY acrOS

nOLLY fingered the lavender note
and looked at me nervously across
the coffee pot. .,
'1lMother has written" she began
ssStop!'' I said, holding up my COT
fee cup warningly. ~ know ALL She
wants to visit us. | thought that the
ed. Let her come on! " and l put
down my coffee cup and. folded my arms
with dramatic resignation.
adam didn't have a mother-in-
law, she protested.
Ono, but he had a serpent.
"Jaek!" Polly. looked at me re-
"Who entered his garden of Edens'
without even asking to be in
vited,'' protested Polly.
"And played: mother-in-iaw in the
very latest fashion,
"Waell,'"' inquired Polly, "f It hadn t
have had to blame for all his troubles,
matrimonial or otherwise9 And If it
were not for his mother-in-law, whom
would the modern man have to lay the
burden Of his sins upon7'
"And what would the comic artist
and the joke writer do when all others
fail?''
to tighten up heavy eomedyS'
"Or any man when his dinner won It
digest and he wants something to
grumble about9 After all. the mother
in1law has her uses
"And abuses!'
life. When life is tragic she furnishes
comedy; when it is merry she enters
the honeymoon patch and turns all into
tragedy, "a la Adam s mother-in -
and broke my roll with sigh.
Polly twisted her coffee cup medita-
tiye7y ao, D. Ro,;o,,o .ho .ou,,o,+ .,,..
marked at length. "She must have
been Ewes, or why would she have
tried to put the woman in the wrong?'
"For ways that are dark and wiles
that are deep, give me the mother-in-
law! " | quoted, inaccurately; ".Who-
@ nvs1 Rf in!iaw ct 81 a woman having a
H1That $ just it!'' cried Polly: "No-
body ever hears of the daughter-in-
laws mother-in-law. It's the wrong
side of the question, I suppose, and no
body ever sees the wrong side Of any
thing. From literature and the drama
one would suppose that men who marry
mothers are all angels who kiss the girl
Z as the curtain falls and disappear like
the good fairy after she has blessed the
i wedding feast. Men s mothers are al
ways painted by. artists and novelists
with sweet patient, martyred faces,
soft, white hair and smiling, seraphic,
old eyes, while women s mothers, on the
contrary, as every one knows, always
have hooked noses, glittering bad eyes
and carry broomsticks or pokers in their
hands. Now, as a matter Of fact, the
girl, who is being mother-in-l awed is a
Il
than the man who is being mother-in.
lawed,' and Polly shuddered as she
took draught of coffee.
My mother has always let you Sc.
verely alone, Polly I protested.
J EYES," cried Polly, bringing hel
spoon down emphatically on the table
s 'a as if [ were witch or the plague OF
done that, she would have been here
every day trying to teach me how to
keep house and to convince you how
badly I do it. Oh, I know all about
it!' she insisted, as I put down my
knife and fork and stared at her II
amazement. five been mother-in
e lawed before!'
"You 've-wh-w hat?'
"Been ignored and maligned an6
maddeningly tolerated by just as many
mothers as I've known men, rejoinet
Polly. A girl cannot wait until she il
s. married TO De mOther-1n-laWeQ, nor ever
until she is engaged. It begins thu
first time any man not an orphan stop!
calling promiscuously and devotes him
self to her. It begins right in the ball
room, where, the moment she. casts he1
eyes upon Clarence or BERTHE, she ii
greeted by a glare from over his heat
that would freeze her to the SPOT, ait
she not understand its meaning. NJ
young man exists so inane, so good-for
nothing, 50 weak, so depraved, 50 phys
mother does not consider him the obiec
Of every woman g wiles and too gool
for any girl who may so far forge
herself as to marry him.
And yet,' I sighed, unfolding M,
paper, the young things never seen
to be discouraged. In the face of al
this seTpentine guile, they continue t
Polly put down her coffee cup an
looked at me with chilling challenge.
ITO fling -
Polly pushed her chair away from tn
table and started to rise.
HTo fling themselves away on u.s.
.'.Oh,' and Polly sat down agai
with a seraphic smile, I thought yo
were going to say something-quite dill
ferent. Why should they be discou1
aged7' she continued pouring hersel
another cup Of coffee and helping he1
% self to a buttered roll. EWhen
81 man IS mother begins to look at gil