Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1905-12-19
CHAPTER XX

He knows so much, and yet did not
know that | was not a trifling woman"
she thought, in simple wonder. She did
not understand Roland's skeptical man
ner of looking at everything, which could
perceive no palpable distinction between
wrong and right. She could not compre-
bend that this man had believed himself
justified in what he had done.
But she thought of him necessarily.
The image of his pale reproachful face
never left her mental vision. The sound
of his voice bidding her leave him was
perpetually in her ears. He had loved
Ter and had wept because of her. There
were times when she wanted to 90 to
him and fall at his feet, crying out, "Oh,
what am l, that should be counted
against your sorrow?"
There were times when the thought
of Roland Lansdel's sorrow overcame
every other thought in Isabel Gilbert's
mind. Until the day when he had thrown
himself upon the ground in a sudden
passion of grief, she had never realized
the possibility of his being unhappy be-
cause of her.
The weeks went slowly by. To Roland
the days were weary and the nights in.
tolerable. He went up to the city sew
eral times, always leaving Mordred alone
and at abnormal hours, and every time
intending TO remain away. But he could
not; a sudden fever seized him as the
of her stern determination; she would
write to him, avowing that she could not
live without him. All, how long he had
81
suddenly unable to endure her life per-
haps, and would be rash and desperate
enough to go to Mordred in the hope of
seeing him.
Day after day he haunted the bridge
under Thurston's oak; day after day he
waited in the faint hope that the doc
tors wife might wander thither. Oh.
how cruel she was: how cruel! If she
had ever loved him, she too would have
haunted that spot. She would have come
to the place associated with his memory.
She would have come. as he came, in the
hope of another meeting.
He sat by the water listening to the
church bells as they rang out upon the
tranquil atmosphere. The people were
coming TO church. Roland's heart throb-
bed heavily in his breast. Was she
among them? At last all was quiet. and
the only bell to be heard in the summer
stiffness was the distant tinkle of
sheep bell far away in the sunlit mea
dows. Mr.. Lansdell gos up as the clock
struck 3 and walked at leisurely pace
to the church.
She was there; yes, she was there
She was alone. in a pew near the pulpit.
on her knees. with her hands clasped
and her eyes looking upward. The high.
old-fashioned pew shut her in from tie
congregation about her. but Mr. I4ans-
dell could look down upon her from his
post of observation in the gallery. Her
face was pale and worn, and her eyes
looked larger and brighter than when he
had seen her last. Was she in a con
sumption? All, no; it was only the eager,
yearning soul which was always consum-
ing itself; it was no physical illness, but
the sharp pains of a purely mental struc-
gle that had left these traces on her face.
Roland was seized with sudden de-
sire that Isabel should see him He
wanted to see the recognition of him in
her face. Might he not learn the depth
of her love, the strength of her regret,
by that one look of recognition?
green serge curtain hung before him.
He pushed the folds aside: aad the
brazen rings made a little changing noise