Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1905-05-11
THE iNTERMINAeLE SNAKE.
A Story Done Into Conversation by
Circus Man.

| A Story Done Into Conversation by q
Circus Man.
Kansas City Star: Speaking OF
escapes said the icrcus man. pour
ing four fingers of private stock
and downing it with one swallow.
II can tell pretty fair yarn
on that subject. 1t happened when a
guy named Merritt and l were running
snake show next to a camp meeting
down on the Jersey coast. We had
bought lot of wigglers on the Bowery
and Merritt made himself up for Il
Hindoo fakir. He would get into the
| cAge with EN- and play on a tin whistle
| and those snakes would wrap around
him from his head to his toes. and 1t
was an awe-nspirng sight. But the
great stunt was what he called the
4 'interfninable snake when one would
grab the biggest ones tail in his mouth,
another would fasten on to him. and so
on. until the whole blame lot looked
like one serpent. Say. those snakes got
SO stuck on that game that they would
do 1t for sport. Whenever one started
to move around the cage another would
grab his tail and the first thing you
knew the whole bunch was going
around In a string. and the sight of 1t
was enough to make a man swear off
for a year.
We were doing fine business until
a temperance lecturer set up show
little way Off. and that cut into us
so that there was nothing much doing.
The crowd would walk right past the
entrance to our highly moral and In
structive exhibition and go on to listen
to the temperance guy tell 'em about
the evils of drink. as illustrated by the
horrible living examples which he had
upon the platform. You see. that was
II free show. and ours cost a quarter
and cheap at that price.
We'll. Merritt came to me after /
had cracked my voice trying to draw
the crowd without landing anyone. and
i've looked at each other and shook our
heads in sorrow.
. Jim says he. that guy down
there's got you skinned to death on
the ballyhoo. and it's up to you to
go over and get next to the attrac-
,tion and see il can't cop it out
for our show. 1 hate to ask 1t of YOU
says he. knowing your views on the
temperance question. but business is
business. and this amt no time for
sentiment
So | went down to the lecture, and
not being wise TO the game, but anX-
ious not to miss a trick. l went right
up In front, and the first thing l knew
1 was ON the mourner's bench just in
front of the platform. l piped the lee
turer as soon as he came on. for a
guy that used to pull teeth to a brass
band accompaniment down on the
Bowery and say, he could punish more
booze than any man l ever saw. But
he had the gift of CAB all right. and he
had picked up couple of panhandlers
for horrible examples and they made
good in the part They looked as IL
they had been lowed behind a trolley
car from the battery to Harlem. and IL
either one of em had drawn a sober
breath in 20 years he ought to have
sued his face for libel.
. We'll. the ex-jawcarpenter cut loose
in good form. and he soon had every
body worked up. telling about what all
cohol did to your interior lining. and
giving a description of the menagerie
which Il man sees in the jim-jams which
would have done credit to the boss
lecturer In the circus.
"He sort of had me going, too" con-
tinued the circus man, after sampling
the freshly served drink. and l was
trying to decide whether / should swear
off or increase my dose OF bromide
when l saw one of the panhandlers
nudge the other one. He was staring
down the aisle and his eyes were stick
ing out 50 far that you could have
hung your hat on 'em.
BILL says he. tell the old man to
put on full steam. for I'm backsliding
an I've spotted 'em again. Look there.
Bill looks down the aisle and gets UNI
easy. too.
Hank. says he. I've got 'em like
wise, only that amt my usual snake.
COZ he amt got no plug hat with a
red flannel band around it on his head;
but me for the bromide.
It's this damn Jersey whisky that's
changed EN- answers Bill. fer mine
always has gorillas ridin' en-.
Well. | looked around and 1 would
have been scared myself. only l recog-
nized our bunch. each one of EN- with
tAe tail OF the snake in front of him I'm
his mouth. Old Lumber Lary'-we
called him that because he always
used to go to sleep tied In a knot-was
in the lead. and behind him came about
half u mile of snakes. They were fes-
looming themselves up the aisle, COM
ing slow, because there was couple
of 'em that couldn't move very fast
and when the gait got too lively they
used TO bite their leaders tails Old
Larry was raising his head and looking
around every few feet and just when
the lecturer had reached the most thil-
ling part of his Ten Nights in Bar
room spiel he caught Larry's eye. and
the meeting adjourned sine die. right
there. You couldn't see him for dust
as he broke for the nearest speak
easy and the two panhandlers We're
hanging onto his coattails.
Just then Merritt comes in, looking
worried, for he had gone to sleep and
let EN- get away from him, but when
he sees EN- he takes out his whistle
and goes hnck to The show. footing 1t
like a blasted pied piper. the snakes
following along Is mesk as Mary's
lamb and most OF the audience goes
after 'am
did business inlplove?" asked the
stranger.
Improve? Why, my boy. after we
put that temperance show out of bust
ness we just turned 'em away for
three months. And the hotel people
put us on the free list at the bar. be-
cause Merritt used to take 'em down in
Interminable Snake formation for q
dip In the ocean every morning and
the hotel press agent wrote 1t up as
the daily appearance of the gigantic sea
serpent"