The L'Anse sentinel. (L'Anse, L.S., Mich.) 18??-current, 1905-04-15

must feel perfectly safe. II anything
ever happened, cause my dad was the
bravest man In the world, and he would
rush to the rescue OF the countess. II a
burglar got in In the night. or the water
pipes busted. or anything. and all she
had to do was to screech twice and dad
would be on deck. and she must open
the door quicker'n scat. and she
thanked me. and said she would. and
for me to come, too. Say, on the dead.
wasn't that a plot for an amateur to
cook up? Well. sir. we had to wait so
long for the countess to get on the horse
chestnut that got nervous myself, but
after awhile there came a scream that
would raise your hair. and told dad the
countess was singing the opera. Dad
said: "Hennery. that amt no opera.
that's tragedy" but she gave two or
three more stanzas. and told dad he
better hustle, and we went out In the
hall and raped at the door OF the
countess room, and the maid opened It,
and told us to send for a doctor and a
policeman, cause the countess was hav-
Ing fit. Well. say, that was the worst
ever. The countess had jumped out
OF bed. and was pulling the lace curtains
around her, but dad thought she was
crazy, and was going to jump out of the
window, and he made a grab for her,
and he shouted to her to 'be cam. be
cam, poor woman, and will rescue you. "
l tried to pacify the maid the best |
knew how, and dad was getting the
countess calmer, but she evidently
thought he was an assassin, for every lit
tie while she would yell for help, and
then the night Waterman came in with
house policeman, and one Of them
chokeddad of, and they asked the count
ess what the trouble was, an she said she
had Just retired when she was stabbed
about hundred times in the small OF
the back with poniard, and she knew
conspirators were assassinating her.
and she screamed, and this old bandit.
meaning dad, came in. and the little
monkey, meaning me, had held his hand
over her maids mouth. so she could not
make any cutlery.
Well, got my horse chestnut all
right, out of the bed, and the policeman
told the countess not to be alarmed, and
go back to bed, and they took dad and
to our room, and asked us all about It.
Gee, but dad put up story about hear
Ing woman scream in the next room,
and, thinking only of the duty of gem
tleman under the circumstances, rushed
to her rescue, and all there was to Il
was that she must have had a night
mare, but he said IL he had 1t to do over
again, he would do the same. Anyway.
the policeman believed dad, and they
went or and left us, and we went to
bed, but dad said: "Hennery, you I'M
derstand, l don't want to make any
more female acquaintances, see, among
the crowned heads, and from this out
we mingle only with men. The idea
OF me going into a woman's room and
finding Floradora with fits and tan
trums, and me. sick man. Now, don't
write to your ma about this, cause she
never did have much confidence in me
around women with fits" So, Uncle
Ezra, you must not let this get into
the papers. see?
Well, we have bought our ticket for
Liverpool, and shall sail tomorrow, and
while you are making up your cash ac-
count Saturday night we shall be on
the ocean. s'pose will write you on
the boat, II they will tie It up some
where so 1t will stand level. Your dear
boy,
III,NNEpv