davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Bings-What do you think of this Mere
dith idea Of marriage for ten years
ton for good conduct?-Life.
boy again. have You? Why didn't you say:
Get thee behind me- Satan''2
Benny-Behind me! Geei I was wishln
he'd get between us!-Puck.
Are your papa ana mamma at homer"
No. replied little Marguerite; zone of
them may be here but they never are
both at home at the same time. Chicago
Record-Herald.
Are you going to Europe this sum
Z don't know" answered mrs. Cumrox.
Going to Europe isn't what it used TO Pc
you know. When man travels now a lot
/ of people turn up their noses and wonder
whether grand jury is after him. -
| Washington Star.
DO you not love said the Cadaverous
| Boarder, ITO explore the UnknoNableE TO
wiring from Chaos the secret Of its In
you just bet I do answered the ste
please pass the hash?''-cleveland Leader.
50 you have read your daughters com
YES answered the matter-of-fact faith
er. Il am dumbfounded. I can't under
sibly and profoundly would chew gum
and wear high heeled shoes. w ashing-
ten Star.
'T trust" the new joke. contributor
wrote. you hay ind something to at
t'Huhis grunted the editor, Il find an
error in spelling The word batch should
/ be 'botch.' Philadelphia Ledger.
"A woman should know without asking
whether her husband is happy said the
model wife.
4 can ten,'' answered young Mrs. Tor
kins when Charley comes home late TO
/ dinner and can't speak above whisper,
know the home team has won another
game ''-Washington Star.
painting today Of Sthe-er-what is the
name of that little god that represents
matrimony2
) Mr.. Timmid-WeIl, now. you've got me.
Miss Passay-Ohi Mr.. Timnid, this is
i SO Observation-Disclosures Press.
THE SIEsTA-
tells EN- to please
Bile dinner er peas
En- set me a table out under de trees,
En- femme be fed
=, Wild pone er caWn-bread
En- ingerns; den femme lay down On dc
bed.
Den de skeeters kin sting
En- de dirt-dobbers sing,
: De housefy kin tickle my yur wild es wing
De dishes kin break
En- de shelters kin shake,
: But all kines er fuses can't keep ms
r awake.
De chiIlun kin bawI,
De cuckrOach kin crawl
: Up my britches, en- peafowls en- roosters
r kin sQuall.
/ But hit takes more n desc
t T onsettIe my ease
r When Use ct a good dinner er -cawn-breaC
! Charlotte Observer.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16
ANOTHER VIEW.

Governor Hoch has decided to hear
the application for pardon for John
Collins. If Collins was really guilty of
the revolving crime of which he was
convicted, the death penalty should be
enforced; but f. as the writer firmly
believes, John Collins was convicted
of his fathers murder because that
was cheaper than paying the heavy in
Governor Hoch cannot too quickly
remedy the infamy of which his
predecessors have refused to take cog
Observation-Disclosures Advertiser.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

TT is-it is really
I made the experiment boldly. 1T is,
7 whispered, and added, I'm sorry %
make the fourth tonight"
You might have been the first why
weren't you?'s she asked.
well. you see. it was all that mon
ey," I quoted.
yes. / must make sure was right
there I declared, and I did so.-B. IA.
Marriott Watson in London Mail
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16
WHO WAS ROASTED

A local merchant asked Salina edi-
tor to roast the city administration for
letting an itnerant peddler come in
there and underseu him on goods.
This is what the editor wrote: CITY
dads, you will hereby take notice that
you are roasted for permitting ped
dlers to sell goods here. The mer-
chant for whom we do this has his
job work done in Chicago logan
Republican,
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16
ERANK AROIIT IT

stormy Jordon is dead at OF
tumwa, Iowa. Jordon's spectacular
fight against the Iowa prohibitory law
gave him a national reputation. He
had many peculiarities and really had
a good heart. A sign over his door
read THE Road to He'll and when
ever a customer called for "the best
drink in the house he would set out a
glass of Mater-Concordia Blade.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16
THE KANSAS AND THE STAND
ARD


Thou, too, sail on, ship of our state;
5al1 on, q Kansas, strong and great
humanity with many fears,
With many hopes for future years,
AGAIN hangs breathless on thy fate.
Thy sons marched forth at Freedoms call.
Lhey offered up their lives-their all
That untold millions yet unborn
Might lift their faces to the morn
NO more should drain the cup of gaIl.
But once again the e6ict: Thou must
SACKED by 1nsensate poWer-the Trust
With ominOus shadow like a pail
hurry 'er the industries Of all,
And hopes again trailed in the dust.
Who dares before this giant stand?
me cry went forth through all the land.
Each looked to each-none seemed to
Another Lincoln needed we.
who'd strike the shackles with strong
hand.
There stood erect, brave Governor Hoch!
our heIds of oil-they are no joker
Ferhaps not SO good to launch a ship
As other things (which make men Slip,
But shah we yield without a stroke2"
From DER the plains from dawn to dawn
me shout came back: THE issues drawn.
Our sons again will prove they dare
Compel tyrant to be fair"
And all the world is looking on
Topeka, Kan. Nav 10 1903 - -
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

represented. Perhaps Mr. Garfield
would rather be an Ohio congressman
than have a job where he has to go
around prodding the beef trust and the
Standard Oil company, but a Kansas
man isn't built that way.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16
NO FAILURE IN SIGHT.

we don't Know Whether there IS
anything in it or not. but an old timer
in Smith county claims that rats will
leave the country a year in advance
of crop failure. There are plenty of
rats here now.-Phillipsburg Dispatch.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

As near as We can find out. the
United States supreme court has de-
cided that if a man wants to gamble
in wheat he mustn't do it in a bucket
shop. but must wait till he can afford
to gamble on a board of trade, where
he. can be robbed a-plenty.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Some people think that a minor on
ciaI has no chance Here is an in
stance that contradicts that theory: Ev-
cry body knows who the commissioner
Of corporations is, but can you ten of
hard who is secretary of the depart
nent of commerce and labor. Mr.. Car
6eld's chief?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16
KNOCKS THE THEORY.

When It rained on Easter Sunday we
had a right to expect that it would
rain each Sunday for seven successive
Sundys. but the fact that it has not
even thought of raining any Sunday
since, destroys the old theory. 1t has
rained nearly every other day in the
week, but not on Sunday.-Phillips-
burg DISPATCH
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

an expert accountant it is infamous
to hint that his resignation should
even be escrowed.
aGiye him a bigger chance
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

The highest price said to have been
paid for member Of the recent New
York legislature is $4,000. The name
of the legislator who topped the mar
ket is not given.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

In talking about the possibility that
Germany may have to keep back the
yellow peril" Emperor William talks
like a man who would like mighty well
to be invited into the scrap.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16
TIE FIELD Is ZEE.

If Rockefeller cannot satisfy the feel
ing for the heather through the regu-
lar channels he might organize a mis-
sionary trust of his own. The field is
not roped in.-Los Angeles Express.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16
FROM OTHER PENS.
DEFINITION.

A sympathetic strike is one in which
the emotional artisan quits laying
bricks and goes to throwing them.-St.
Louis Czlobe-Democrat.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16
MAKING MONEY FAST.

The late James G. Blaine used to es-
innate the value of each immigrant as
81 800. At that rate we are richer by
nearly $50, 100000 through the arrival
in New York of 1908 newcomers in a
single day.-Boston Transcript
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16
"sPECTACLEs.

Boston is quoted as favoring the re-
vival of the hoopskirt. That quaint old
New England town is and always has
been Unfortunately fond of spectacles.-
New York Herald.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

A New York paper Is printing COM
rnunications signed "A Democrat Who
Regrets He Voted for Roosevelt" In
the west plenty of Democrats can be
found who have no regrets that they
voted for Roosevelt and plenty more
who regret that they did not vote for
hirn.@Omaha Bee
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16
sIoRTAGE On FOLLOWERS.

as the Democratic leader in 1908. The
Democratic party will have no trouble
in finding a leader. It's the followers
that are going to bother them.-Os-
borne Farmer.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

IN view Of the way Rojestyensky
treats Frances courteous request that
he quit territorial waters. taking
French leave is an idiom that the Jap
anese have good reason for not under
standing.-New York World.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Mr.. ]. Pierpont Morgan has decided
not to buy VesUvius. Perhaps Mr..
RockefelIer's recent experiences with
eruptions have discouraged him.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Roosevelt managed to do at Chicago
just like he has everywhere else. He
spoke his mind, and both sides claim
they are pleased with 1t. Only a few
individuals got mad.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

If he would Just as lief. most of US
would prefer to have Mr.. Rockefeller
let us give our own money to the
churches.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16
on MOTION roc.

While Secretary Taft was sitting on
the lid he should have kept his eye on
Secretary Morton. There seems to be a
rift in the cabinet on the subject of
rate egulation.-Phfladelph Record.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16
THERE HAvE REEN OTHERs-

Professor Trent says Daniel Defoe
was the greatest liar that ever lived. -
But no doubt the professor means up
to that time.-Elmira Gazette.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

The Omaha Bee says there are
many Democrats in the west who re-
gret that they did not vote for
Roosevelt The Bee must be mis-
taken The election returns indicated
that there were not very many Demo-
Gratis IN the west who did not do SO.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Some men think that women would
be failures as politicians. They ought
to try being club reporter on a news
paper when there is a club federation
fight on
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Most of the bankers who go wrong
live in Ohio says the Concordia Blade.
OF course. That's where Mrs. Chad
wick lives
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

AS we understand It. France says
she hasn't violated any neutrality law,
and, anyway, what are you going to
DO about it2
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

A Los Angeles man tried to initiate
Hoch the bigamist, but he had sue
ceeded in accommodating only five wives
when he got caught.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Lineviteh is debating to the Russian
army. but Kuropatl1in still seems to be
debating the interviews to the press
typewriter.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

ty would command greater respect If it
were not followed with murders of Ro-
man Catholics by imperial soldiery and
massacres of Jews under official toler-
ation.-Hew York Tribune.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Now that the president is home we
would like to know what is really un-
der the lid.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Chile, Argentine and Peru have kiss
ed and made up. They say they won't
fight any more, and the chances are
that they will hereafter be content with
homemade revolution once in a
while.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Emperor William seems to know
thing or two in some lines anyway. He
says that soldiers who fight booze too
hard are not much good at fighting the
enemy
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16
BUT N WAS BUCKING.

On. reaching Washington Mr.. Roose-
welt will ind the lid still on and Taft
still on the lid.-New York World.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

A drone bee is the LATEST thing on
earth, but all his children are hustlers.
How do our s.heredity'' cranks explain
that Jewell Republican.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Since Senator Burton had his pocket
picked in Chicago, he probably knows
how the victims of that get-rich-quick
company felt.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Mr. Schwab is going to England
next. Had you heard that England is
advertising for a new navy?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Baseball note from the Washington
Post: 1.-THE president has asked the
public scorer to credit Secretary Taft
with an assist
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

News comes from Ohio that Commits
sioner Garfield viii probably make the
race for congress from the district in
qa5a which his nlustrious father once
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

"Her Trials Are Over" is the face
tious headline an eastern paper puts
on Nan Patterson story. The theat-
ricaI managers viii now make their
trials-to get her to go on the stage
again.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

What shall we do to be saved from
the dandelions? There are two grow
ing this year where one grew before.
Howard Courant.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16
TUBERCULOSIS TOO.

Fresh air and sunshine for meningitis
have beaten out all the serums. They
were always good doctors.-New York
World.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

The milk Of human kindness seems to
have not only soured in some people.
but actually curdled.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16
A DTsAGREEABLE FROST.

Personal interest in the proposed
Philippine junket has waned percepti-
bly, since Secretary Taft announced
that the guests would be expected to
defray their own expenses.-St. Louis
Globe-Democrat
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

You viii notice that Russian
leave" is altogether different from
s.French Leave
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Kansas seems quite willing to let
Oklahoma have the cyclone record
Pittsburg Leader.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Germany acts like a country that is
getting hungry for a taste of jiu jitsu.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16
KANSAS COMMENT.
THE PROFESSIONAL.

Some Jurymen can always be de-
pended on to vote mot guilty.
Howard Courant.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Mother Bird-Iook out, my children!
There's a horrid man trying to catch you.
Judge.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16
HuMOR % THE DAY.

Bings-What do YOU think of this Mere
dith idea of marriage for ten years2
Bangs-Does a man get any commute
ton for good conduct?-Life.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Are your papa anu mamma at homer
asked the caller.
No" replied little Marguerite; lone Of
them may be here. but they never are
both at home at the same time '-Chicago
Record Herald.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

1anan ought to keep her kimona
on. even if France does violate a neu-
fralftv law once in awhile.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

DO you not love" said the Cadaverous
Boarder, ITO explore the Unknowable? To
wiring from Chaos the secret Of its In
dwelling Entity2'
You Just bet do answered the ste
nographer, smiling sweet1y. VIII you
please pass the hash ?''-CIeveland Leader.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Mother-Been lighting with that Murphy
boy again, have your Why didn't you say;
Get thee behind me, Satan'f2
Benny-Behind me! Geei I was wishin'
he'd get between usi-Puok-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

It must have been tough on the
president to have to come back to
wearing starched shirts.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Are you going to Europe this SUM
mer?'
Il don't know" answered Mrs. Cumr0x.
Going to Europe isn't what it used to be,
YOU know. When a man travels now a lot
of people turn up their noses and wonder
whether a grand Jury is after him. IT,
Washington Star.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

$50 you have read your daughters COM
mencement essay?'
er. Il am dumbfounded. I can't under
stand how anybody who can write so SEN
sibly and profoundly would chew gum
and wear high heeIed shoes. w ashing-
ten Star
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-16

Tfllian russell has Wf1Lten q IIlsl5a
zine article on How to Keep a Hus
band Why doesn't Lillian write OF
a subject she knows something about
She never kept a husband very tonl
at a time.
Free press. [volume] (Hays, Kan.) 1888-1908, 1905-11-18
Martial Law In Poland
To Put Down The Uprising

st. Petersburg, Nov. IS. = Martial
law has been declared at Cronstadt.
Vice Admiral Birileff, minister of ma
rine, left for Cronstadt. 1t is an
nOunced that martial law will be de-
cIared throughout Poland.
The universities and high schools
throughout Russia have been closed
Indefinitely by order of the minister of
education
The excited appeal which the Social
Democrats and other bodies are max
ing to the town council and Count
Witte to prevent a massacre. and the
loud warnings published by the Radi-
cal press, which favors the Organiza-
ton of a national militia, have the ap-
pearance of an organization to terror
ize the public and to brighten the gov
eminent into acceding to the demands.
The intellectuals are being told to arm
themselves for defense against the
BLACK Hundred" These appeals are
greatly exciting the masses and might
precipitate the bloody tragedy which
they seek to avoid. At the Haymarket
10000 excited peasants were seized
with the idea that the intellectualS
were arming against them and began
wildly talking of means of defense.
The police, under instructions, went
among the crowds, quieting them and
assuring the peasants that the danger
Free press. [volume] (Hays, Kan.) 1888-1908, 1905-11-18
A Modest MANS Desire.

would not care to be so ricn
That all the world would envy me;
do not crave possessions which
Would bind me down to slavery;
l merely want a little more
Than they have who live next door.
To have the worldly means whereby
might outshine my friends and not
Be forced to strain would satisfy
And make me happy with my lot;
I merely want a little more
Than they possess who live next door.
Thus favored, I would leave behind
My present friends and move away
And richer, prOuder neighbors find
And there as now still meekly pray
But to possess a little more
Than they might have who lived next
door.
And, having that, how fine and fair
A planet this would be! And when
outShOne all around me there,
Id proudly move ahead again,
And ask for nothing, as before,
Save to eclipse the ones next door.
would not be so rich that hate
Must follow everywhere 1 went;
AS have tried to plainly state,
With little I could be content;
All that 1 ask is always more
Than they may have who live next door.
Chicago Record-Herald.
Free press. [volume] (Hays, Kan.) 1888-1908, 1905-11-18
A Students Home in Paris.

Latterly, the studio had been turn
ed from its original purpose and made
into delightfully."- impractical home
for students like ourselves.
The interior was one room with a
closet for the sink and running water
Across the end opposite the door
hung an inside balcony so irresistible
that we engaged the studio on sight
of it. The furnishings of the room
consisted of a large table and three
common chairs. In one corner a dis
ouraged-looking little stove, like
mustard pot in shape, stood at the
end of yards and yards of unromantic
stovepipe. This rusty cylinder fol-
lowed the outline of the room, up the
wall, along the roof to the apex, then
through an opening, Strayed outdoors,
where, at last, it became a thing of
reauty robed in trailing vines. An
old easel served as hatrack and UNI
hrella stand, with a peg near the stove
reserved as the proper place on which
to hang the coffee pot to dry.
A short fight of steps led directly
from the room to the balcony. This
was broad enough for the two sleep
ing touches and narrow passage in
front. An artistic railing ran across
the balcony and down either side of
the steps that, on company occasions,
served for seats. Under the balcony
a models stand had been left.-Caro-
line Domett, in Donahoe's.
Free press. [volume] (Hays, Kan.) 1888-1908, 1905-11-18

was purely Imaginary.
Genuine alarm has, however, been
created by the reports of the contem-
plated massacre of Jews here, as
shown by the fact that members of
the American colony, including num-
Der of naturalized Jews, appeared at
the embassy in a greatly alarmed state
to ask for advice and protection.
Spencer Eddy, the American charge
daffaires, made them speech, saying
that he did not regard an outbreak as
possible, but he instructed them all,
in the event of danger, to seek refuge
at the Klienmichael palace in Serge
street, in which the embassy is situat-
ed. Should the threatened outbreak
occur, Mr.. Eddy will demand a mill
tary guard for the palace. The other
embassies have been similarly beSieg-
ed by alarmed foreign residents.
General Dedulin, project of police,
has issued an order referring to the
rumors of a proposed attack on the
Jews and the intellectuals, reminding
the police that on them lies the re-
sponsibility for the maintenance of
order and the safety of every inhabit-
ant of the capital without distinction
of position, nationality or faith. He in
structs them to bring to trial the in
stigators of violence and persons
found issuing seditious proclamations.
Free press. [volume] (Hays, Kan.) 1888-1908, 1905-11-18
Trouble In French Cabinet;
Minister Of War Resigns

Paris, Nov 13.-The Rouvier minis
try met with it's first check when M.
Berteaux, minister of war, perempt-
orily withdrew from the ministerial
branch during an angry debate in the
chamber and thereafter announced his
resignation. For a time the entire
cabinet hung in the balance, and
Premier Rouvier announced the readi-
ness of himself and his colleagues to
give up power unless they were sup
ported by a substantial majority. At
ter a debate of exceptional violence a
motion favorable to the ministry pre-
vailed by vote of 80 to lat. How
ever, the ministerial majority is made
I'D of fractions of divergent groups
and the future of the cabinet remains
in doubt.
After the session the premier went
to the Elysee palace and requested
President Loubet to call a special cab
met council, at which NJ. Berteaux' S