Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1905-12-30

where I got 1t and what kept me out 80
late.
Husband Showed Wisdom.
Another woman lager that took on
something vicious got down TO the pier
few minutes late for the boat one fore
noon in November. found out afterward
what made her act SO sore over being left.
1t seems that she was living apart from
her husband. and that they had entered into
an arrangement to live all the time with
an ocean between them. The husband spent
six months in Europe and the other six IN
this country. and SO did she. He paid her
a good many thousand dollars year for
consenting 20 this deal. and the stipulation
was that this allowance should cease If.
thorough her fault. they should ever find
themselves on the same continent at the
same time. Well. she missed the steamer
by a nose on this morning and her husband
was due on the ship arriving from Europe
on the following morning. So you'll
that she sure enough haa something to kick
about. Oh, she kicked, all right. When
she got through with the agent the
dock he walked into his Office, removed his
Office coat in q tired kind OF way and re-
marked that he thought he'd knock off for
a day or so and go home and lie down. He
looked and acted like ne hadn't any fur
Their Zest IN life.
That husband of hers he observed. IS
the wise guy to keep the raging main be-
tween him and her. He's the crafty dog
IL ever there was one. Theirs must have
been peaceful home
This woman managed to stick to her
bargain with her husband by shooting up
to Boston and catching a steamer from
there that left early on the following morn
Ing. She was n pretty young woman with
pair of eyes like a gazelles and babyish
look in her lamps: but IL she didn't make
this shed seem as If a typhoon had hit Il
broadside, then | never heard a soused
bosun's mate explaining things to a shift
less crew with Delaying pin.
One of the hardest luck laggers that
ever saw was a man who ratified down
here in caloosh al o'clock in the morn
Ing, pretty well edged up. for he'd been
around with the gang making some fare
well visits.
Bound to catch her. Ell? I said TO him
when he wabbled out of his cab
You bet your nose ring I'm bound to
catch her, he came back. Stayed up all
night to catch her. I've been left painting
on these docks just four times in the last
nine years. and this time I'm going to climb
over the side and get myself boarded up In
my cabin and cinch the situation seven
hours ahead of time. Ny names Willie
Wisdom from Wakeeta, andsIve done my
last little stunt hornpiping around on
steamship dock and hating the bunch lean
ing over the rail out in the middle OF Mr..
Hudson'S river.
Hard Luck Pursued Him.
so Willie Wisdom OF Wakeeta chambers
over the gangway and turns into his little
white bunk. Along toward . in the morn
ing a gang of his Indian friends from up
the line swooped down on the pier with
ratties and horns and things. and they
went aboard and hauled him out OF his
bunk and yanked him down to the pier.
They all went over the way to envelop
few parting hip bones and while they were
doing that the boat began TO move out.
Just as she began to move the man who
should've been on board of her came lop-
ing across the street without any hat
his pals had corralled his lid-and started
20 h. yNtAr tnd ut lin,
that there was nothing doing in the shape
Of a ride for him on that packet, and he
came to a halt. His friends were right
after him, and they danced the ring around-
rosy with him In the center. He looked
mad at first, but he finally grinned and
took his fifth dose of the lagger's medi-
cine good-naturedly enough.
You don't want to take too seriously
all this stuff that you read about people
being carried over to Europe accidentally.
There was chap who was written up
good deal last summer having been ac-
cidentally cargoed over to the other side
but he wasn't, SOS you could notice IT.
He just wanted to get over there for q
little wtizz, without any domestic incum-
brances, and he got by with 1t. He didn't
let on to anybody that he had the whole
thing framed up to be carried of while
busy bidding friend on board good-by.
His wife, who wasn't particularly good
looking, was down at the pier to meet him
when he got back about a month later
SO they took you across without your
wanting to go? said to him when his
wife was out of hearing for moment.
1.-The wink that he handed me out OF his
left orb put me wise all right. He'd lost
about fifteen pounds. had circles under his
eyes and looked in general as II he'd en-
joyed himself a heap
Too Bad He Missed It.
Last September a middle-aged man with
kind OF leftover jag and a cigar stuck
very much offside in his face poked his
head out Of carriage that rumbled up
about half an hour after the ship had gone
and called me over to him.
" Is she gone? he whispered to
" Half an hour ago. said l.
" But said he, smiling at me amiably.
my wife was aboard of her, and I've missed
her,
" Too bad said I.
" 'Uh-huh.' said he, still gr.nning at a
great rate and handing me q fstful OF
cigars o SO =, 1t is IS Too bad and he gave
finger. Horrible, that's what l call 1t.
Distressing, burned If it isn't and he gave
me another poke In the blouse. Worst
thing that ever happened to me- and he
went right on grlnning Mine is sure
enough a sad story and then with one
parting poke he directed his grinning
eoachman to drive him to a certain uptown
tavern that's heap well-known for liveli-
ness. Now. wasn't that odd?" and the old
Waterman waved a truckman into the
shed with his wand and chuckIed.
Just then a tired-looking messenger boy
podded up to the pier entrance, carrying
a magnificent basket OF the choicest fruits.
She gone yit?' the messenger boy asked
the old Waterman.
Nope, son." replied the watchman-the
steamer had departed about half an hour
before. Hand 1t over and I'll get Il
aboard"
The boy passed the fine basket of fruit
over to the old Waterman and shambled
away
IF there's any one thing that me and
my old woman likes this kind of raw
weather." observed the old Waterman of
the pier, holding UP the basket and eye
Ing its contents admiringly. its hot-houss
fruit"