Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1905-10-14
A DAYS SPORT.

lord and master of the Jones family
started across Cousin He's farmyard
with an old army musket thrown over
his shoulder. DO YOU want to kill your
self? Do you want to blow off that old
! BALD head of yours? % you-"
"What do You suppose I am going to
do with it, madame? What do you sup
pose am going to do with it y broke
in Pa, haughtily. "What would any man
do with a gun! What are guns made
for? Did you think | was going fishing
with it! Did you imagine for one mo-
merit that was going to shoot the chNtes
with it2 You ask more silly questions
than a census enumerator! You waste
more words than a monograph! You
ACT mere like Il Smith every day of your
lifc>"
That's all right, you old sinner" re.
Joined Ma, with some heat. but lust
YOU take that gun back in the house!
Who ever told you that you were a Ted
dy Roosevelt? What licens, have YOU
got to carry around a gun when You can't
shoot frecracker without burning your
fingers? Where did YOU"
Say. woman barked Pa. you make
me sick You make me mad You make
me hot in the collar! Do You think am
a KID? Do YOU think | am Smith !?
Don't YOU think ! know ANYTHING !!
Haven't / read Il chapter in the cncvclo-
paedia every day for ten years? Didn't
use to hang around shooting gallery /?
Haven't | followed every move of the
japanese war? Go climb tree, dear
soul! You are in the past tense class
Your Uncle Henry is going out to bag a
few blackbirdsl"
You silly old chump!" cried the ex.
asperated Ma. 1t would serve YOU lust
right if YOU did shoot yourself! 1t might
take some of the conceit out of YOU!
Cousin Hez, are you going to let that
medalesome old freak shoot blackbirds ~
He won't hurt 'cm none. Mary" an
swcred Cousin HeZ, soothingly, as he APP.
preached the scrapful pair.
Suppose he should kill himself?" cried
Ma, angrily. Il don't want to ride home
in a day coach and have him in bag
gage car! l want him where | can watch
him"
Il wouldn't worry bout tibet, Mary, ?
returned Cousin Hez, reassuringlv.
Coin gunnin' amt half as dangerous
as talkin' politics, an tibet ole musket
is kind an gentle in single or double
harness. ies so yer don't overload it,"
What do You think | had better put
in, Cousin Hcz?" asked Pa. Il meant
to ask you, but forgot it..
WAL, if | was you. ! wouldn't put
in more than three on four fingers" re-
piled Cousin Hez. Guess it'll stand
four"
"Threc or four fngers!" interrupted
Ma, eXcitedly. "Who ever heard of such
a thing? The simpleton may just as
we'll shoot off his head as his whole
hand!"
You are the limit, Smthy! You are
the limit" giggled Pa, while Cousin
IIez bit off a chew of tobacco to hide Il
copious grin. That catalogues you all
right That shows what you know
about the cunning game! You measure
a charge in gun by placing the fingers
against the protruding ramrod, Mrs.
Jones, Just the same as you measure a
swig of coming through the rye in Il
whisky glass;"
Indeed" was the sarcastic rcioindcr
of Ma. Then it is a cinch, Mr.. Heath
en-. that Won will absent -mindedly over
load that gum
That's right. woman! That's right,
dear soul" barked Pa, with some agi-
tation. Keep it up! Keep on jabbing
me with a harpoon, and then wonde,
why l don't love your dear mother and
kiss little Fido!"
With this Pa Jones maicstically strobe
forth. hoped rail fence. and was soon
lost in the depths of a waving cornfeld.
| h. 4 4 b,4
evening, and started to boastingly re-
cite the incidents of the trip, before a
yapfnl individual with abundant whisk-
crs and a tin badge to match, approached
with the remark;
is this yere Henry Jones?"
1t gives me great pleasure. sir. To
say that it IS replied Pa, patting him
self on the chest
We'll, I'm Their game warden for this
! ycre county" returned the other. proud.
/ ~ an | hereby arrest yer accordin' II
! Their constitution of Their United States
ther Declaration OF independence, an
! ther statuettes of New Jersey!''
What's that? What's that?o shouted
J Pa. What's the specific charge against
me? What have 1 been doing? Re-
member. | viii carry. this ease to the
supreme court, -
'Ther charge agin is shootir' a robin
/ in Their cornfied Of Hez Jones" was the
lreply of the game warden.
You are mistaken. sir! You arc mis-
taken" exclaimed Pa. Indignantly. Il
never shot a Il robin!"
Il know yer didn't" admitted The
game warden. with grim smile "but
yer hit one jos Their same VIII yer 20
with me peaccable like. or
"Thet's all right. Josh! Thct's all
right interposed Cousin Hez I've GOT
ter 90 ter the store termorrow Ter cit
some paris green. an me an Hen viii
met Yer at Their 'squiTc's. Now, then,
fcrgit il, and lets cider up
Didn't ! tell you So YOU old crow:
Didn't | tell you so?'' cried Ma. as soon
as Hez and the game warden disap-
peared in the wagon house Maybe YOU
will listen TO what | say the neyt time -,