The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-11-16

Wlthal to buy a meal had hope and
ambition and determination, but no
money One day you came to me ana
offered me loan of i've dollars. Never
in my life
Il came to you2 offered you a
loan of five dollars2 Say, major, laugh
with me-ha! hal hal"
Never in my life shall forget your
unexpected kindness. You knew moth
ing about me, but you saw honesty
and integrity in my looks, and some
succeed at last. You offered me nVe
dollars and accepted it in the spirit
rendered That sum laid the fOunda-
tons of my fortune. All I have owe
to you, and 1 am free to say So"
All you have" shouted Mr.. Green,
as he looked around at the Office fur
nlture. Say, maJor. you grow fun
nier every minute. You will next be
offering to repay the joanna! hal
Had I known where to reach you
the loan would have been repaid years
ago. As it is. I shall not content my
selt with handing you a check for the
amount. Mr.. Green. have you ever
heard of the Great American Inter
changeable Pie company
MI Green stood up and laughed.
Then he leaned against the wall and
laughed. Then he sat down and snig-
gered.
Our object is to make the Amer
lean pie known to the civilized world
known and appreciated. No other
nation ever built itself up on pie. It is
the pie, sir-the American pfe-that
rules the world. NY company pro-
poses to make them by the billion and
ship them to every inhabited spot on
the globe From the first of October
to the first of March of every year we
shall make mince pies only. Forty
eight ingredients and two crusts in
every pie. Our trade mark plainly
stamped on the upper crust, and ali
persons counterfeiting it viii be arrest
ed at once Every pie sent to its des-
tination in its own wooden dish, and
ten cents viii buy one in Persia as
and nothing like 'em. We have al
ready secured hundreds Of testi-
monials.'
Say, now-say. now-hat hal ha!.'
roared Mr.. Green, as he laughed till
he was red in the face.
From March to October. I. con-
tinued the major, without turning a
hair, 1--WE shall send out custard.
peach, cherry and lemon pies. The
price Will be the same, and they will
give the same satisfaction. The cap
ltaI IS $4,000, 600, all paid in, and the
stock is already selling above par.
Biggest, grandest, richest thing on the
face of the earth. The dividends will
reach 100 per cent. in the first six
months Don't touch Standard OIL
-lOA1 ABOl Win the Deer trust. Come
into the Great American Interchange
able Pie company, That is"
Ihat IS, you want me for vice
president, at a salary of SIS, 900 per
year2' interrupted Mr.. Green
You have struck it exactly. Sew
eral years ago you loaned me S. 1t
was bread cast upon the waters. I
want It to return a hundred fold TO
YOU L want you to know and fully
realize that the sentiment of gratitude
sun beats IN the human breast. Ac-
cept the place, my dear old friend
accept it and let me shake your hand
in congratulation."
asked.
Wen. you can tell me what you will
do If you have a better thing on hand.
why I have nothing to say. but yo1,
know 1 would like to have you with
me-
Mr.. Green smiled. Then he grinned.
Then he chuckled. Then he roared and
4 slapped his leg. FAs
And the dividends can't be less than
100 per cent, after the first six months. .
solemnly asserted the Major. who was a
good deal troubled in his mind.
You slick dead beat! You noble old
/ liar! You benefcent old bald-headed
son Of a gum"
Il do not understand you. SIR
/ Then Mr.. Green rose up with smile
on his face and reached out for the
Major and made his heels knock over
] the stove as he swung him around. The
second swing cleared the desk, and the
! third raked the plaster all along one
wall Then the Major was stood or
his head-stood on his feet-danced ur
and down and played pitch and toss
with, and when he was finally left lyine
on the dusty floor Mr.. Green passed out
Of the office with a TIA ia, Major. The
Great American interchangeable Dead
Beat company wishes you a fond good
4 day!"
The Major got up after few min
utes and brushed the dust off and sal
down and hummed merrily to himself
4 He had lost everything but honor. but
that was as SAGE as the Rock of Glib.
raltar.-(Copyright, 1905, by r. B. Nc.
Clure.)