East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1905-01-21

uOu Cdft uOW NuCu VI HOh hibiO
money you make, l want you to un-
derstand that there's only one place in
the world where you can live a happy
life, and that's inside your income. A
family that's living beyond its means
is simply business that's losing mon
ey, and it's bound to 60 to smash. And
to keep u safe distance ahead Of the
sheriff you've got to make your wife
help. More men go broke through bad
management at home than at the Of
flee. And l might add that a lot OF
men who are used to getting only one
dollars worth Of food for Eve dol
lar bill downtown expect their wives
to get five dollars worth Of food for
one dollar bill at the corner grocery
and to save change toward a pair OF
diamond earrings. These fellows would
plant tin can and kick because they
didn't get a case of tomatoes.
OF course some women put their
husbands salaries on their backs in
stead Of his ribs, but there are q heap
more men who burn up their wives
! new sealskin sacks in two bit cigars.
Because a mans a good provider 1t
doesn't always mean that he's a good
husband; ii may mean that he's hog.
And when there's cuss in the family.
and it comes down to betting which,
on general principles the man always
carries my money. L make mistakes
at it, but it's the only winning sys-
tenn I've ever been able to discover in
games Of chance.
You want to end the wedding trip
with business meeting and talk to
your wife quite as frankly rs you
would to a man whom you'd taken in
to partnership Tell her just what
your salary is and then lay it out be-
tween you-so much for joint eX-
penses, the house and the housekeep-
| ing, so much for her expenses, so
much for yours and so much to be
saved. That last is the one item on
which you can't afford to ecOnomize.
It's the surplus and undivided prohts
account Of your business, and until
the concern accumulates big one 1t
! isn't safe to move into Offices on Easy
street
A lot of fool fathers only give their
fool daughters a liberal education In
spending, and it's pretty hard to teach
those women the real facts about
earning and saving, but it's got to be
done unless you want to be the fool
husband of a fool wife. These girls
have an idea that men get money by
going to a benevolent old party be
hind some brass bars and showing a
check at him and telling him that they
want it in ffties and hundreds.
You should take home your salary
in actual money for awhile and ex-
plain that it's all you got for sweating
like dog for ten hours day through
six long days and that the cashier
handed it out with an expression as
If you were robbing the cash drawer
of an orphan asylum. Make her un-
derstand that while those that have
get, when they present a check, those
that haven't get 1t in the neck. Ex
plain that the benevolent old party is
only on duty when papa's daughter
has a papa that Bradstreet rates AA
and that when papa's daughters hus
band presents Ave dollar check with
ten cent overdraft he's received by
low browed old brute who calls fol
the bouncer to put him out. Tell hei
right at the start the worst about the
butcher, and the grocer, and the Ice
man, and the milkman, and thu
plumber, and the gas meter-that they
want their money and that 1t has Il
come out Of that little roll Of bills
Then give her enough to pay them
even II you have to grab for you
lunch from a high stool l used t
know an old Jew who said that thu
man who carved was always a foo
or a hog, but you've got to learn no
to divide your salary on either basis.
Make your wife pay cash. A womal
never really understands money til
she's done that for awhile. I've no
tieed that people rarely pay down tn
money for foolish purchases; the.
charge them. And it's mighty seldom
that woman's extravagant unless sh
or her husband pays the bills by cheek
There's something about counting ou
the actual legal tender on the spot tina
keeps a woman from really wanting