Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1905-12-30

| sAeher-Now, Johnny, WHIT IL tua
p9ect tense of the verb Ito lnvestr'
Jany-To investigate.-New York
ST.
say, Jean, won't you lend Paul
fivtr Does he need 1t badlyT Il
shad say sol He wants to pay back
wit he owes mev-Les Annales.
Rrst Old Lady-He was bad char.
actr; but l believe he repented at last
| Seond Old Lady-Oh, no, he didn't;
| aw that he died ntestate.-London
Glbe.
Whata beautiful hat you're wearing
today" I'm so glad you like 1t. You
haze such good taste" Yes, | had
ON lust like it-last year."-Meggen-
dofer Batter
Poor old Henpeck leads a dogs life
with his Wife" well why on earth |
Doesn't he apply for a divorce" He
sa,s he wanted to, but she wouldn't
lei him. Eek.
I a man smiles and looks pleased
wien you pay him a compliment, pay
| hin another one. In time you may be
ale to borrow money from him.--Som-
grille Journal.
NV DOCTOR" said Billyuns, has or
deed me to take more exercise
what are you going to doT Have
tn. ticker moved across the room from
m! desk. Elk.
Young Mother-The doctor says you
shouldn't kiss the baby; 1t isn't sanl-
tay. Old Neighbor-Poor little fell
lov-why don't you wash him?-De-
trdt Free Press.
Yictim-What has happenedf Where
an II Doctor-You have been serious
| " injured in a trolley accident. But
cheer up-you will recover. Victim
How much ?-Ex.
Bank Cashier-You have overdrawn
your account madam. Lovely Lady
That Is just like me! My husband says
/ am always exaggeratlng everything.
--Somerville Journal.
- Mamma-Of course you said, "Oh,
this is so sudden" when Tom finally
proposed. Daughter-No; | fully In
tended to, but | was so excited l for
got and exclaimed, "At last!-Ex.
"Oh, Mr.. Brown, why did you leavs
I the Christian Science Church, Real
l ~, Miss Jones, If you will have the
truth, l got 80 awfully tired of being
30 persistently cheerful all the time
- Life.
= First AUTHORITATIVE you sold many
copies Of your book2 Second Autho
ed (absently)-Wonderful. Over hun
III dred thousand First Author-Whe
of was 1t issued2 Second Author-Ne1
as Tuesday.-Life.
Mother-Bobby, l begged papa II
al hour to-day TO Duy pony, nut
nd won't do It, Bobby Indignantly
Nc Why didn't you burst into tear
id Couldn't you do that much for me2
40 New York Mail
II understand that your boy is g.
ting an education" "Yassuh," answ'
d ed Uncle Raspberry, IAN mebbe h'
lie dom better'n dat. l honestly b'lieT
lie he's gittin' sense along wifi it,
y Washington Star
did TIL docther find out what 1t
. that's ailin' yer" "No. He said tn
- nawthin' but a postmortem examin
ton wud liver reveal ut. An haven
- enough curiosity about ut to have |
done "-Cleveland Leader.
Dear pop" wrote the boy from til
art school, don't send me any MOI
money! have saved half that whic
you sent me last month" Com
home" wired the old man, you
never make an artist. Puck.
Chief-Do you mean to say that 20
haven't been able to get single cleI
as to the perpetator of this crime
Detective-Naw. Them newspaper re
porters Is down on me and they won
tell me nything.-Cleveland Leader.
Reporter understand that one o
your guests committed suicide las
night by hanging himself out OF
third-story window. Lodging hous
Keener-Well, there was such a room
or in the air for a while.-Town Top
les.
AHce rushed In from the garden
where she had been picking flowers
she was badly stung by bee, ant
vas holding on to her finger and sob
bing pitifully. "Oh. mamma" sh'
cried, 81 burned me on a bug!"-
Brooklyn Life.
Young Lady (repeating conversation
to deaf old gentleman)-Miss Frill
says It gave her such fright. Deai
Old Gent-Eh? l didn't quite
Young Lady-Such fright! Deaf Oh
Gent-Ah, yes-I agree with you-S
she is!-Punch.
II suppose, madam" said the archi
tect, "you will want an electrolier pu
In the drawing-room" Sure" an
swered Mrs. Neurich; 81 don't know
how to play one, but I'll begin taxing
lessons at once, regardless OF cost
Chicago Daily News.
by the way, what has become o
Browns book, One Hundred Shor
Cuts to Wealth. that he was working
so hard upon last year" "Oh. Brow
anIahad tho hook all right hut wa