The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1905-05-07

latter on the shoulder.
You want an umpire and you haven
got one,' he remarked.
You don't say So said the Slugger,
looking the stranger up and down. Now,
who could have told you that, 1 wonder p
Nobody told me. You have murder
in your eye; therefore, you want an UNI
pire. Your hatred does not seem to be
centered on any particular Individual
therefore, you have not yet chosen your
umpire
WONDERFUL sneered Cy Priest.
will umpire this game the stranger
calmly added
"Oh. you will. eh?' said the Slugger,
and who could have told you that pray p
didn't have to be told, the stranger
said with a slight smile. You seem to
have taken rather a strong dislike to me
already. That in itself is sufficient proof
that am going to umpire
Before either Cy or the Slugger could
say anything further the self-appointed
umpire had fiiped a coin.
Heads or tails? he asked of Cy
Tails 1t is.
I'll take OUTS said the Slugger.
1.-THE stranger led his bloodhound over
to the grand stand and chained him to
the fence.
What in thunder did you choose him
for? asked the Slugger.
Me choose him?' retorted Cy. You
chose him YOURSELF
Batter up! Play balll' interrupted the
umpire. And the game was on.
Say, maybe he wasn't the scientific
umpire, thought Why, he had this deduc-
ton theory Of Sherlock Holmes right at
his fingers ends, or at the tip of his
tongue, or wherever it would do the most
good.
For example IN the third inning when
Slugger threw high to first on Cy Priest s
grounder the first baseman had to jump
to get the ball and ii was n question as to
who reached the bag first. Like a flash
the umpire was over there and on his
knees examining Cy's shoes.
AS I expected, he said. There are
cleat marks on the instep of your left
shoe. The first baseman must have land
ed on your foot. Which proves that your
foot was already there when the first
baseman landed. The runner is safe
I'm the seventh inning his extraordi-
nary umpiring again came into evidence.
Pink Perkins of the Roarers drove a low
liner to Foxy Flenner, the Lilies third
baseman. Foxy scooped it in almost as
it touched the ground.
Hold your base yelled Cy Priest to
Perkins. He didn't catch it. That was a
pickup. How about it. Mr.. Umpire?
1.-THE umpire was examining the ground
in front of third base.
"'No,' he said finally. 4 find here
marks of the third baseman's fingers. If
1t had been a pickup ic Is safe to assume
that the ball would have left a slight in
dentation. The runners out
"He again showed his ability az an UNI
pire in the first half Of the ninth, when
Bull Thompson, who was catching for the
Lilies kicked on a called ball.
nv hat W.
ever split the plate protested the Bull,
holding the ball where ne had caught it.
1.-The umpire drew a powerful magnify
ing glass from his pocket and focused it
on the ground just outside of the home
plate.
Come here, he said to the Bull AS
perhaps you are aware, the draught Gre
ated by the passage of p swiftly pitched
ball slightly distuI'bs tie earth directly
beneath it. When the diamond is as dry
as it is today the disturbance is quite
marked Look through the magnifying
glass moment Do you see that groove
where the dust has been blown aside
Well, that's the course that the last ball
took, and it's just an inch and half
wide of the outside corner of the plate.
Are you satisfied?'
"But the climax came in the Lilies half
of the ninth, with the score 8 to in favor
u
on third and one of the Foote twins at
the bat. | say one of the Foote twins
lust which one II would have been impos-
sible to say.
Fright Foote and Left Foote. you see
they held down right and left fields re-
spectively, for the Lilies-were mates IL
ever two feet were mates.
Both of them were all to the good as
outfielde-s, but while Right Roote was a
he hof Taft Ennfa
have hit a bunch of toy balloons II you
held 'em In front of him.
"Fror that reason Captain Slugger Bur-
rows always put their names pretty far
apart on the batting list, so that neither
of them ever came to bat while the other
was on base In this way 1t was possible
to have Right Foote bat for both OF them'
and on account OF the brothers extra
ordinary resemblance the opposing team
could never spot the change
wherefore, in the ninth, although II
was Left Foote's turn at bat, a good many
of MS had a sneaking impression that 1t
was Right Foote who really toed the
plate.
..xyhen a moment later he basted the
hall over the center field fence, coming
behind Bull Thompson with what we
thought was the winning run, we mad no
doubt as to his identity
THE Lily rooters' cheeihS In. -
on election night, swarmed out on the
field.
ICY Priest rushed up to the UMPIRE
gesticulating wildly.
That vas the wrong Foote,' ne was
protesting. That was Right Foote. he
batted out Of turn. Left Foote'S the right
Foote.'
q 'Orderr commanded tie umpire, mo
tioning back to the crowd with MS manu.
I scent foul play
He trotted out to left field and exam
ined the ground with his magnifyine
glass Then he came to the players
bench where the Foote twins were sitting
and seized one of them by the leg.
Let's see the bottom of your shoe.
he said. 4 have learned by the footprints
in left field that the man who has hsan