Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1905-12-09

jaw, which / got in, they brought me
out on top. When the Teller pilgrim
had been licked l took the wager and
deposited it in my vest pocket, and,
discoverin' that he had still another S.
left, l accumulated that also. l did it
that he might be helpless to deceive
any one else. He was chankin' his
teeth and tearin' up grass by the roots
when I drove away, and, while I felt
to pity mankind in general, had no
soothin' words for him.
An hour later and four miles away
my nobler sentiments was appealed to
ag'in. Alongside the road a man Of
honest look and middle age was cuttin'
the brush away, and when stopped to
make inquiry he answered.:
II am preparin' the ground for a
camp meetin' to be held next week.
Countless wicked souls are gallopin'
over this territory, and they must be
saved from destruction. Wouldst ex-
tend me helpin' hand?'
II wouldst; but, KNOWN the people
az well OC l. w, lCL Lie dSA AOW you
are to get 'em to gather together for
any such purpose2"
1--WE shall advertise free beer and
sandwiches for all who attend"
"And while they are drinkin' their
beer and gnawin' their sandwiches you
will spring the trick on emp
'That's it, They have got to be
brought to see the error Of their ways.
and it don't matter how you do it.
Wilt contribute for about four kegs Of
beer?'
mot at this stage of the game. 1t
strikes me as bein' leetle out of the
regular line. If you've got to chuck a
man full of beer to get him to embrace
religion, what's he goin' to do when he
sobers up?"
"Your words don't show that you
have any enthusiasm in the great
cause" he said as he began to look
ugly.
'Well, thus far l have never mixed
my beer and my religion together"
"And you refuse to assist in savin'
the thousands Of souls gallopin'
straight to perdition?"
"At least 1 am not in favor Of the
berry way"
''Thou Satan in disguiser' he ex-
claimed as he came nearer and shook
his fist at me. "'Tis an act Of Provi-
dence that you should be sent to me
to have your speerit duly Inundated
and humbled before 1t is too late. Get
down from that wagon while pulver-
iZe thy carcasSw
My speerit is naturally meek and
humble, as every purchaser of my Pain
Alleviator knows, but there are times
when the wickedness Of wrath rises up
within me and acts on my knee and
elbow jints. This was one of 'em.
was still pantin' from my conflict with
the old kuss down the road, but hop
ped down and shed my coat and made
a mental resolve that If l came out
victor I would donate twenty boxes Of
paper collars to the heather Of Africa
within thirty days and that the price
Of my alleviator should not be increas-
ed CnereDy.
The man with the new religious the
DRY came prancin' up to me with the
smile Of victory on his face, and when
he hit me clip on the ear that rolled
me over on the grass he lifted up his
voice in exultation and was proud and
stiff necked. But he rejoiced too soon.
When / arose / sailed in with an ener-
gy born Of grim determinashun, and
five minits later he was licked man
and wonderin' how it was DONE When
his speerit had been reduced to prop
er state Of humilashun and he had
given me his solemn word that the
beer and sandwiches should be left
out Of the camp meetin' and Satan
should have fair show in the game l
wiped my bleedin' nose on the grass
and proceeded on my way, and he had
no remarks to make to the back of my
neck as it was turned toward him. 1T
was for me to rejoice and feel glad
Integrity and virtue had met the enc
my twice in two hours and damned
thunder out of him OH both occasions.
M. QUAD.