Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1905-04-01
EDITORS ADVICE ON SOCIETY.

The questions that are asked Of a
newspaper man have all the range Of
those which are hurled at a telephone
girl The girl probably, has the bet
ter Of the newspaper man because she
Is not expected always to know "the
answer" and it doesn't really make
any difference whether she does or
not. With the editor, however, it is
different If he can't tell, offhand,
what the majority given the candidate
for superintendent Of schools in Kiowa
county, Kansas, in 1888, the color of
the dress worn by the wife Of the
sixth president at the inaugural exer-
cises, he is Immediately set down by
his critics as an incompetent man.
The editor of the Des Moines News,
though, probably takes the palm for
odd questions, as evidenced by let
ter he received a few days ago and
which he answered through his edi-
toial columns The letter follows:
To the Editor: l am to be married
In June I have always had desire
to go into soofety-into the real whirl.
My intended husband can afford to sus-
tain me in this desire. What do you
think of it? Now want your real
opinion. B. G. L.
The News man sat down and wrote
the following answer, which he printed
with the letter:
judge from your letter that you
have some misgivings and really want
me to present the opposition view.
In the first place, hope If you sue
coed in getting into the whirl of So
cial rounds that there will be admin
Z istered unto you an abundant en-
trance into the charmed circle, and
that you will not have to cringe and
crawl before society leaders In order
to become one Of the elect. know of
no more humiliating attitude for any
real woman to assume.
And l also hope you do not wish to
break into society for vanity's sake,
for assure you that such vanity is
rightly joined by the psalmist with
'vexation Of spirit
Because
Let me put it boldly. The woman
who goes the full social pace leads the
life of slave. She is the bond serv-
ant of conventions. She must go,and
go, and go, at the beck of the leaders,
keep late hours and endanger both
health and happiness.
"She is in grave danger of indulg-
ing in that extravaganza that fire.
quently leads to ruin
"She must neglect more or less. her
home and her children.
"And one of the very worst things
is this: She must see comparatively
little of her husband She is escorted
to table and must dance with other
men. Society's dictum raises a bar.
rier between man and wife.
Here is to be found the source of
much marital nhappiness-and some
divorces.
The ideal married life presupposes
companionship of husband and wife
closest intimacy, sweetest fellowship.
Society deliberately separates them.
Far be 1t from me to deny that
many cultivated women. fine wives
and mothers are of society's number.
"But-
"In view of all the dangers, in view
of the fact that you owe to yourself
and to your husband the highest and
the best Of which you are capable, is
it not well enough to ask. Will it pay?
That is my real opinion"
The News editor talks like one who
thiS", e1AAo PSl uO uO0S. however,
1t would seem that, unless the young
woman who wrote the letter is resi-
dent of a metropolitan city, the siren
uosity of the society woman's life is
little overdrawn in the answer.
There are few places outside of the
big cities where a woman's society du-
ties will keep her so busy, if she is
the right kind of wife, as to make
her stranger to her husband and
children. If woman, or a man
either, has the opportunity to enjoy
the advantages of good society, she
or he is missing a great deal by not
improving the opportunity. Ones life
is short at best, and any innocent
pleasures should be enjoyed to the
fullest extent for truly, one is pretty
certain to be "a long time dead"