The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1905-10-02

A worldly wise woman. who was
much in request as a chaBeren. used-to
tsH her girl friends TO take an they
could get, Yet be careful to seem as if
they expected nothing; TO the end that
when they got nothing they might ap-
pear as though they were in 10 wise
disappointed. Still wiser is the modern
philosopher who teaches that happi-
ness, and its closest congerer, content
Is not SO much a matter of what one
can get as Of what one can do with
out; People who are self-pOised and
Well-DaIanced rarely, as the saying is,
stand upon their own rights" neither
are they forever reaching aft=r the I'M
attainabie. Most things come sooner
or later TO those who understand how
TO wait, not forgetting to labor mean
while.
There is an old French adage which
says that in every pair of lovers there
Is one who kisses and one who turns
the cheek. II is stili oftener the case
mat or the pair there is one who ex-
poets, aud who usually, for a time at
least attatns his or hcr own way in
everything. Generally it is the woman
who, during the period OF courtship.
plays the tyrant She likes to feel that
her lover is SO devoted TO her as TO b.
at her beck and call under any and all
circumstances, and sometimes she has
the bad taste to enjoy the display oof
her power over him, to the detriment
or others. and even to his disadvan-
tage. She cannot understand why he
should wish TO spend a moment any,
where else which il is possible for him
10 pass in her society. She regards
MN as unkind and negleclful if he is
polte, or even decCntly civil, to any
other girl when she is i'm the room: she
makes MIN fetch and carry, and makes
dSmandS upon his time and attention
which are both selfish and unreason-
able. II man is much in love he is
usually ready TO submit; to lay such
tyranny 10 the score of her love for
him, and, therefore, suffer gladly" all
caprlceS upon the part of his lady love.
unfortunately this is frame of
MIND which rarely survives the mar
rage ceremony: the complaisant swain
Is more than apt to develop into the
most eNacting and tyrannical of nus
bands. There are many men who con-
slider it part of their Wooipg to Let the
woman whom they WOO have her own
way IN everything, upborne by the ex-
pectation Of turning the tables after
marriage. 1t Is only during the court
ship that he places hsr upon a pedestal
ana kneels tJfoE. her; on something
OF the principle with which an angler
gives fish the line, in order that he
may land il with more certainty. 1t is
after the prize is won, when he feels
that she is securely his, that the desire
10 assert his mastership asserts itself.
He thinks that he ought to arrange att
matters Of mutual concern; that his
should be the casting vote in all de-
clslons, and he be the supreme author
lty upon all subjects, which change of
attitude is likely TO prove disconcert-
ing 10 the hitherto petted bride
Perhaps It is better in the long run
when the lover is "magerfuI' from the
i start, when he sets out with the firm
conviction that if anyone is to give in,
that one is not to be himself He looks
upon a woman, even the woman whom
| he is counting with a view to marriage
as person who is bound to submit
| ner own viii to that Of her lord and
! master. Are not men the natural and
| ordained lords of creation? There are
women, Dy no means all weak women,
Who do not at all resent this position
| upon the part Of a lover; who like 10
be "bOssed.' provided the "bOssing" is
/ done scientifically; who enjoy being
governed by viii which is stronger
than their own. will which has brains
ana sound judgment as well as ale .
/ ton for themselves behind il. Indeed
II IS beyond dispute that there have
! Oeen happy WlVsS whose husbands
| chose their gowns and ordered all the
| aHalrs or their household Including the
dinner. 1t ali depends upon the man,
ana the woman. II is when both are set
+ uDOD having tn cir own E4-aV and x.-ha,-
both are gifted with ObstinaCy. thai
the tug Of war comes. Many an Old
bachelor many an unmarried woman
might nave been the heads of happy
! Ialhliles II only they had known WheI
10 come back and be forgiven" Their
IS always point in every quarre
Wheh one may surrender with flying
coiois and all the hOnOrs of war. j
thaJ moment IS alice. to pass, defeat
may be turned into Il rUut and become
/ lrrctIleFable.
,-.,,,,.,,,..
place Is IL 10 yield? In all fairness thC
answer should be: The one who is
WronS. And since off 5nse is often TAX
/ Ell where none IS meant, given nno-
: Gently OF uhcollsclously the paradox
/ le.u reply is: Both, and neither. The
/ WIsest course Is to practice the golden
Iui7' e3ch 10 study the wishes of the
; otheI' 10 avoid the beginning OF strife
Nhich the wise man tells us Is like th'
leIulg OUT OF water, and still more e
( 9 ,,il' tle struggle OF the last word
nc ld9t Nord mas oeeh rightly de
,,acbi1s t lIi,5| Ut i'ltelIla
! ,,,, - ""N VIZ Sho"iI
J -, -, a. So 1t uI'du 'ue@
roesDs.ioI' VIZ" 80 'i,er TOT u
What is the good Of hs,,ir,5 0 ~ ~
/ word, anvVav2 When husband am
wife each strives to pleasc The other
I zyhep oarh fe raa ID, 70 ,-ioiJ = --.,,tt.
1 that both shave their oJEn wave ef,,.,
/ thosc WAYS ana wills AFRO fbc 80
In married IFS s,criics ,,,,,,f a., e..
| s| iNi