davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
THURSDAY, NOVEMBER ss, lsos.
sosEHING YET LACKING.

MT. Israel Ludlow, of New York, cer- tainIy has the saving grace of dogged persisrency at anything he undertakes. He has experimented again and again with his aeroplane and keeps at 1t. An occasional plunge into the Hudson doesn't set him back. for he puts on dry clothing and tries again. His machine may take as many headers into the Hud- son as 1t likes. but if he keeps whole bones he will keep on trying.
 We are told that Mir. Ludlow "has mastered the problem of equilibrium for the nlachine,r and also that nothing remains now but to make 1t stay up and eo." Just so. Those are two things that no one has yet mastered. . Some of the best machines yet made have an uncomfortable habit of refus- ing to stay up. That has been one of the main troubles with all the flying machines yet tried. In spite of all the skin and nice calculations that can be bestowed on them they do not always stay up. They have an unpleasant habit of coming down at inopportune times and smashing things. When he makes one that will be sure to stay up as long as desired he will have mast cred one great difficulty.
 The problem of making it go is not such a dificult one, but the job is to make it sc in the right direction. A great many of the balloon arrangements will go, but in most cases they have an uncomfortable habit of going where they are not wanted. If there were no upper air currents one of the greatest obstacles to aerial navigation would be out of the way, but when a sharp cross wind strikes one of the big machines there is pretty sure to be a defiection from the course marked out by the navigator. If he is not wrecked by such an adverse current he stands a good chance to be blown where he has no wish to go. Mir. Ludlow may have conquered some of the difficulties, but when he gets a machine that will be sure to stay up and that will be equally certain to go just where he wants 1t to go he may begin to receive congratula- tions They are hardly in order at this stage of the game.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
Running for Governor.

BeSSemer weekly.
 Conner and Cunningham are pere- grinating the State proclaiming their aspirations for the Governorshtp It is quite proper and a laudable ambition upon the part Of Lieutenant Governor Cunningham. His term ends this com ing year and he enters into the coming contest. being properly in the line Of promotion.
 How different with President of the State Railroad Commission, B. B. Co., mer. He is a man who asserted that he was above seeking political honors, but he had a deep, unrelenting antip- athy against the railroads swindli0g the dear people, his fellow citizens, and for so great and noble a cause he was willing to sacrifice time and money and accept service where he could counter act their nefarious practices and so he canVassed the State. he and his band of reformers CD denouncing the rail- roads as swindlers, panderlng to the lowest pre1udices of the people and was trtumphantly elected to the posi- tion he sought where he asserted he could be most effective in reforming the so-called abuses of the railroads.
 Well, what has Conner done or ac- complished! Not a thing. He says. won't do as he does. But they are hon orable men and the presumption Is thev act on their own and not on Comer,s convictions. But the board is the in strumentality to reduce or regulate railway rates and his associates terms will soon expire, and if the people are with him they will elect those who canvass for that kind of men for inc board? They are to be elected st ths corning election. Why don't he stick to the duty ne was elected to perform?
 The Governor has no power or an. tfIority to regulate railroad rates Ee ig as tmpotent as county. sun~rins xepdent Of schools in that direction Tf Eanrss he can recommend, So can
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
Presidential Rudeness.

New York World.
 President Roosevelt's letter to Henry World today, is most regrettahle and ill-advised.
 Tn the Massachusetts campaign this fall MT Whitney a candidate for Lieu: Roosevelt had told him that he~ fa- vored reciprocity with Canada. The statement caused little surprise. MT. Roosevelt was not long ago a tariff stand patters" is recent; and it is not inconsistent with a wish for reciprocity treaties, since the sacrosanct Dtngley act itself provides the machinery for Roosevelt wao misrepresented he had only to correct the misstatement, as he has often done Tn matters far less im- portant.
 when a committee of substantial busi- ness men of Massachusetts, headed by the Governor of the State, called to urge him to favor the admission of for fused to discuss the matter with them on the ground that MT. Whitney had msrepresented him.
 The excuse was ridiculous, since misrepresented. with stenographers and secretaries at his elbow. It was impolitic, since the committee represented every voter in the country ing a pair of shoes. MT. Roosevelt is not an autoc-at. but the chief executive of American public opinion, and should be accessible to its reasonable utter ance.
 In his admirable letter of the 17th inst, admitting that he might have misunderstood the President. but deny. lng that he was guilty of intentional misrepresentation, MT. Whitney ex- pressed to President Roosevelt the re- gret which most men who wear shoes will share, that
 "The righteous cause of reciprocity with neigh3oring countries. of so much value to our people and to the whole of the human race. Is not to have the indorsen.ent of your great name and the benefit of your potent aid"
 To this innocent sentence Mir. Roose- veit apparently takes exception as "an- other deliberate misstatement," and proceeds to lecture poor Mir, Whitney some more upon his lack of the power of exact thinking"
 But this is preposterous. Mir. RooSe- welt. Cannot man even recognize hts own regrets7 Is 1t not enough for q President of the United States 70 De discodrteouse Must he also be ridieu- louss
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23

The Milwaukee Free Press. good Re- publican that it is, doesn't give us a very high opinion of the newspapers of that State. Speaking of the campaign which opened about the 1st of August. 1901. it declares that 'if all the newspapers that received money for their editorial opinions, or for control of their editorial pages. re- eeived as much as some of which the Free Press has knowledge. there was paid out to the newspapers of the stall wart brood not less than $160,0O0 dur ing that year"
 Then The Free Press goes into de- taiis and says that some of the papers sold out as low as seoo. and others re- ceived larger amounts, in some in- stances running up into the thousands. From reading our contemporary s charges and specifications one must come to the conclusion that majority of the State papers were bought up. It Is not for us to dispute the charge.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23

Manchester (N H.b union, New York to The Berlin Tageblatt, a German newspaper of worldwide repu- tation, a cablegrnm warning Germans who. contemplate coming coming to 2, AmerifSa: st f!as they are forced to work by Jevolvers, and arc treated worse than slaves It is. perhaps, needless to say that no would deliberately put in circulation such a falsehood as this. The ahsurd- ity of the statement is. ot course al, al, have lived in this country any lens t6 of time. They have found all parts of the United States well adapted to the seeker. In the cases of those who have remained in the fatherlhnd. how ever. and have no knowledge of condi. tions oyer here, pupsaea aearsiss stasemSa. Sa. terrent influence against their, emigra- tion. Southern newspapers seem to take the grSnd fna5 eae Sy ab6r clement of justice in their suspicious If they are correct, the tact reflects dent and the aforementioned labor agents, than upon the South.
 German immigrants are among the the
 SeS oSt states TE TSe NoS that fact So, evidently, does the South. No honest, true American will forget that sectional ilnes, asloe rom geo. graphical boundaries, no longer exist be his duty to advertise his own State or group of states. When this is done Iegitimately, 1t Is well; If an enthu- siastic New Yorker, or New Englander has discovered points of worth in which his part of the country excels others he is perfectly justifled. in saving SO. and in scattering the fact broadcast SO that he who runs may read. When, on the other hand, he seeks to attract favorable attention to his own vicinage grades himself in the minds of ali who know the facts. but also defeats the end which he had in view. The indi- vidual who sends abroad derogatory America Is not the individual whom Americans are proud to recognize as fellow citizen.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
Japnnese Hunting Yarn.

In a Philadelphia club a number of young men were arranging for a rab- bit hunt as soon as the shooting season should begin, tells The Pittsburg Ga- Zette.
 John Luther Lon. the Japanese au- thority, said:
 There Is a Japanese rabbit hunting story.
 "One Jap meets another in the hunt ing season with a gun over his shoul- der.
 "'Aha, been shooting? he says. You look upset
 1T am upset replied the huntsman, and with a good reason. l started a rabbit. Cherry Blossom, my dog, ran after it. I fired, and Cherry Blossom fell
 "'Too bad. And the rabbit?
 "'The rabbit? It brought Cherry Blossom back and laid her at my feet"
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
A Demonstration.

The superintendent of a factory went into the storehouse one day and saw the storekeeper tugging at big case of goods. His face was red and the muscles of his neck were bulging out.
 Hold on there, Jack" cried the su- perintendent, allow me to demonstrate to you the power of brain over mus cles." He grabbed a hook that was on a shelf and stuck it is the case, gave a quick jerk and toppled over into a pile of rubbish. He got up, looked at the storekeeper, and said Blame it, the handle was loose"
 "Yes. sir" replied Jack: that's why I didn't use it."
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
Quaint Indian Funeral Customs.

W dSHll6 Iou oNaA'
 Many strange Indian tribes live a. round Hudson bay. The Creek and Nascopple Indians are among these tribes who have a peculiar custom In regard to their dead. As soon as one of their number Is dead. the surviving relatives place the dead one in box which they beg from the Hudson Bay Company. In this box are placed, with a loaded gun, a powder horn, a tobac- co pouch. a flint stone for striking fire, the snowshoes for travel and an axe.
 This box Is then carried to the top of the nearest hill and set there with stones upon the top of 1t, For ten days it is left undisturbed. and then the rel atives remove the gun and other valu' ables, believing that by that time the dead one has reached the happy hunt ing grounds and has no further use for them,
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
What State Papers Are saying
Babies Preferable to Either.

HuntsVlIle Tribune.
 They tell us that the smart set are now substituting cats tor poodle dogs and that they will soon be seen saiiIng around with half a dozen cats orna- menting their vehicles. This may De fun for some, but 1t strikes us that poodles and cats are a terrible weak substitute TOT me tat baby wno eitn- CT resembles his daddy or has the soft dreamy, beautiful eyes of its mother There is more pleasure in one real bapy in one minute than in all the poooles and kittens on earth in lifetime. Sc we must say, we prefer babies to poo. dles and pussies, and 1t impreSses us as strange that all folks are not built that way.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
Mule HumbIed by the Hen i.

Kansas City Star. +a.5-.
 The pride of the Missouri mule wal humbled when the State Labor Com missioner made a report of the statis' tics of the hen. The hen was worth to Missouri during the fiscal year just closed 31,50O.000 in eggs. chickens and feathers. These products made 20.75l car loads The mule loses. And yet the hen did not produce enough eggs to float the traditional battleship kept by the State for purposes of measure ment, but there were enough mules to kick hundred holes in its armoI plate.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23

To show one of the reasons why courts and court trials are not held in respect, we copy this paragraph from The Kansas City Journal;
 Two men. Bartlett Richards and w {. G.. comstock, were charged with ille- Tnent land In Sheridan County, Neb. The Department of the Interior spent four years and several thousands of dollars in pursuit of these offenders and in collecting the evidence to convict them. When they were finally brought 10 bay in court and stood face to face with a conviction, the accused pleaded mercy of the court. The District Attor- ney accepted the pleas and the Judge sel,tenced the men to remain in the GUS tody of the United States Marshal for six hours.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
UncaIIed-for Political Agitatiop.

When the press of the State comes to give the issue Mr. Conner has sprung up to make himself a leader and to place him in office by political agitation as uncalled-tor as 1t is dangerous to the future of Alabama, at tnIs time it is reasonable to beueye that tne tried, true Id trusty Democratic press of the State will line up agaInst a policy which bodes no good, out appears fuiI of evil to large classes of our people and that the latter from every village, [ ook and hamlet will come forth to ae- feat it.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
Anniston's Educational Prestise.

The synojical college for young men has given Anniston greater prestige as an educational center. and 1t promises to be one of the States most useful and Ihost successful educational institutions The synodical college is for all denomi- nations, although conducted under the auspices of the Presbyterian Church in Alabama
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
Sea Level Canal.

MUUII6 hSBISLtT.
 There should be experienced no great CT difficulty navigating such a canal than in navigating the Suez Canal. Fin ally, were high level canal to be made now 1t would be but a preliminary to a sea level canal The world would never be satisfied until the canal were so, 1t is good policy, doubtless, to adopt the sea level plan at once. 1t will be better and more economical, and will confer more immediate benefit upon commerce.. 'F '
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
Menace to Humanity.

Gausden IImos-NeWB.
 The pistol ''toter'' is a menace to fu- manity. He has been getting in his work in this county to an unusual de- gree for the past several years and it is time to suppress him by law and by force. The walking arsenals that come into Gadsder and load themselves up with cheap wnlskey have no regard for human life or anything else and the courts should have no regard for them, family, friends or influence when 1t comes to assessing punishment that fits the crime.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
va=rants and vagrant Laws.

In Alabama we have a very stringent law regarding vagrancy, which if put strictly In force would have the effect of ridding the cities of a very danger ous and numerous class. and would greatly relieve the conditions in all parts of the country.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
Always Makes Good.

The Montgomery Advertiser will is- sue a special Christmas edition Decem- Der 17th, and promises to surpass all its former efforts in this line. The Adver- tiser always makes good" on its prom ises and we anticipate an especially fine issue.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
Want . Ross.
Birnningh

Birmingham Ledger.
 We may talk all we please about overthrowing the bosses, mankind re- fuses to live without a boss. Like Nor way, men refuse to stay free, or to act freely. The first move of every kind is to choose a boss, or agree to a boss when he chooses himself There will always be bosses.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
There Are Othera.

Fred-Do you have time to read all the stories in that big magazine?'
 Ned-No. indeed: I spend two-thirds of the time cutting the leaves.
 Well. you oughn't to kick-that gives you exercise"
 Yes; that is true enough. but if take too violent exercise so shortly be- fore I can't digest the contents
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
so. We,He Noticed.

Do you believe variety is the spice of life" enquired the tall man with the side whiskers.
 No. not always replied his short companion with the bald cranium. After witnessing that vaudeville show last night I am inclined to change my opinion" gs
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
Horrid Man

There was an old maid from Duluth Asked a dentist to extract her tuth;
 He said "I'll not hurt you"
 She said, "Oh, you f1irt, you" Go on-are you telling the truth?"
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23

The phrase in s letter to pepew. our friend up the river" is likely to become as weIl kHcwn ss the 'Runa. Rouanism and RabslliS61sepf Burehard
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
Water in one Place OnIy.

There has been a decided decline in the prohibition vote of New York city. The people of New York appear to have little use for water except in Wall Street.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
The WrOnr Anaver.

Professor--Now Brown, what is it controls all the muscles of the body?" T can't think. sir" Well, (pointing to his head) what have we hereT
 Oh yes; badness"
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23

Sheriff W. O. Robbins of Fillmore County came over to Montgomery yes- terday from his home in Wetumpka.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23

First Medi, al Stude1t-There comes that stuck up Pillmyx; now watch me cut him.
 Second Ditto--Don', old man-that's shop.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23

in majority of cases will jeopardise the chances of their party in order tol advance their own interests. Let's hang all bosses,
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23

Messrs. F. C. Boykin and W. T. Smith of Brewton came to town yes- terday.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
Sidewalk pencilinss
street Railwax Exp.n.Ion.


 T have visions." said a business man, of great street railway sys- tenn Tor Montgomery in the near future with suburban lines reaching in every direction for fifteen and twenty miles.
 While have no official or inside m. tormation on the subject, l belieye inas the purchase of MT. Richard TiIuss ear lines by the Montgomery Traction Company meaus great expansion on the part of that company which us backed by progressive men. They are projecting a line to Wetumpka which, am informed. is to be built just as quickly as the arrsngemsnn'ts sn's tyii1 ean be be followed by lines to Prattville and probably Troy and Greenville,
 The trolley car is becoming more and more popular and these capitalists. who have become so largely interested in Montgomery. are fully alive to the opportunities offered by Middle Ala bama
 Tt may be a month yet before the Traction Company takes over the Tiliis property, but the transfer will be of inestima ble value to Montgomery. This Is no reflection on Mir. Tillis: either. be. cause he has given us greatly improved service
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
DriftWccd BY PHII. II. ARMsTRnNa.

Uncle Zeke. Mistah Rabbit gettin' spry, Prancin' round an steppin' high Gwinter cotch him by en by Watch yo' Uncle Zeke: 'Possum fat es fat kin be Up dah in de 'simmon tree Bet he gwin' home wi me- 'Rah fo' Uncle Zeke! Big fat taters layin' roun'. Hoecake bakin' hot en brown Best pervidah in de town Ain't yo'. Uncle Zeke?
 He'd Been There. Uneasy lies the head that wears the crown"
 "Yes; the fellow that said that must have been to the dentists"
 Poor Married Man. Brown-Do you believe that events cast their shadows before? Snnith-Yes; and sometimes after--a visit from my mother-in-law, for in- stance.
 One Way. smith had his picture in the paper the other day"
 What was he cured of?'' Nothing; he had it wrapped up in one"
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23

Mir J. P. Billups of Atlanta, General Passenger Agent of the Western Rail- way, and MT. Frank Thompson, one of his assistants, spent yesterday in Mont gomery on official business.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
MaIignlng the south

MT. F. Downing, Jr., of Castleberry is in Montgomery.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
Those chargeahIs shad
ShOp.

What color hair has she?" "A chameleon red"
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
The Only Way.

"Tompkins won his suit.'' From the street railway company Certainly not-this suit he won was at a raff1e."
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23

Editor Joe H. Adams of The Ozark Star was in Montgomery yesterday.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23

|
 | Those Chicago professors are always busy. and there is never any occasion l for surprise If we read that they have I discovered something. Lately two of | the surgeons at the Chicago University have been experimenting on the hearts I of living animals, and they pretend to see time in the future when this im- portant portion of the human anatomy can be taken out for repairs or a new one substituted for it. As one of the professors expresses 1t. he has hope that some day we may replace a wounded or worn -out heart in a human being with the healthy, youthful and strong one from q living monkey"
 Will not that be splendid? Not that keys heart would act in a human, but 1t really might be an improvement on some of the organs now doing duty in the breasts of men and women. There are a number of human vices and fall ings that are not, so far as we are and in many cases it might be an im- provement If tho heart of a miser, a tyrant, or jepraved criminal could be removed and the vital organ of robust and good-natured monkey be substi- tuted. These professors will hardly try 1t on themselves. however.
 
 The Portsmouth Star vents somebody to drop whole punches of tears for the gang of insurance looters who, accord ing to their own showing. are headed direct for the poorhouse. We can't squeeze out one tear.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
Itg Attraction,

Do you like to go to church, Billy?" Sure
 That's a good little boy-rm glad to hear you
 You see. like to fish for the nickels when they pass around the basket how many do you generally get, MT. Jones?"
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23

Alderman J. H. Hartley, who had slight stroke of apoplexy Sunday, was reported last night to be improving and resting comfortably He Is at his home on North Lawrence Street.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-11-23
capt.in seIden a Veteran,

T read an editorial in The Advertiser Intended to do any injustice to any one'' said welI-known gentleman yesterday. What I refer to Is the statement that Judge Carmichael was enough to be in the Confederate ser vice, who is mentioned for State of- fees next year This Is a mistake, as Captain W. M. Selden. clerk in the office of the Commissioner of Agricul- ture and Industries. Was brave and faithful Confederate soldier, fighting four long years and being promoted for gallantry. reaching the position of captain in the regular service.
 Captain Selden Is true blue, work ing Black Belt Democrat, and is always in the front when his party has battles to fight. I am sure your paper oyer looked this fact and meant to do him no injustice"