The commonwealth. (Greenwood, Miss.) 1896-1923, 1905-10-27

tionr and We went and ate all Their,
was and when the time was up III,
detective disappeared and dad had tt
pay for the luncheon. but be kicked al
the way TO London, and the guart
would not listen to his complaints, bu'
told MIN If he tried to hold IN te
train he would he thrown out the Tin.
dow and u over BY the train. We
had the compartment to ourselves thu
rest OF the way to London, except
about an hour, when the guard showed
in a farmer who smelled like cows
n dad tried to get in a quarrel with
him, about English roast beef coming
from America, but the man didn't have
MS arguing clothes on, SO dad began
to find fault with me, and the maj
o dad to let up on the kid or ne
would punch is bloody ed off, That
settled 1t, when the man dropped his
n dad thought he was one of the
nobility, and he got quite chummy
with the Englishman, and then we got
to London, and dad had a quarrel
about his baggage, and after threaten
ing to have a lot of fights he got mis-
trunk on the roof of a cab, and IN
about an hour we got to the hotel, and
then the fog began an engagement. If
the fog here ever froze stiff. the town
would look like a piece of ice with
hsh frozen in. Gee, but | would like
to have it freeze in front of our hotel,
SO | could take an ak and go out and
chop a frozen girl out, and thaw her
till she came to.
Say, old man, if anybody ever wants
to treat you to a trip to Europe, don't
come here, but go to some place where
they don't think they can speak Eng
glish, You can understand a Nitalian
or a ~frenchman, or q Dutchman, who
can't speak English, and knows he
can't, better than you can an English
man who thinks he can speak Eng
lish, and can't, don't you know.
Everything is don't you know If
a servant gives you an evening paper
he says: 'Ere's your paper, don't
you know, and if q man should
don't say they would, but if a man
should give you a civil answer, when
you asked him the name of a street,
ne would look at you as though you
were a cannibal, and say: Regent
don't you know and then he
would act as though you had broken
him of his rest. Dad asked more than
a dozen men where Bill Astor lived,
n OF all the population of London |
don't believe anybody knows, except
one newsboy, We rode half a day on
top of a bus, through streets so crowd
ed that the horses had to creep, and
dad hung on for fear the bus would
be tipped over, and finally we got out
into the suburbs, where the rich peo-
pie live, and dad said we were right
on the trail of King Edward, and we
got off and loitered around, and dad
q beautiful place, with a big iron
fence, and a gate as big as a railroad
bridge, and dad asked a newsboy who
lived there, and the boy made up a
face at dad and said: 'H'astor, you
and he put out his hand for a
tip. 1t vas the first civil answer dad
had received in London, SO he gave the
boy a dollar. The boy fell over on
sidewalk, dead, and dad started to
go away for fear he would be arrest
for murder, but | kicked the boy,
and he got up and yelled some kind
Of murdered English, and more than
dozen newsbOys came on a gallop,
and when the boy told them what had
happened they all wanted dad to ask
hem questions.
81 told the boys ded was Andrew
Carnegie, and that he was giving away
millions of dollars, so when dad got
% the gate Of the beautiful H'astor
place, the boys yelled Andrew Carne-
gle, and a turnkey flunked the gate
open and dad and | went in, and
up to the house. Aston was on
he veranda, smoking a Missouri corr
,ob pipe, and drinking American beer.
md seemed to be wishing he was
Jack home in America. Dad marched
light up to the veranda, like a veteran
and Aston could see dad was
IN American by the dandruff on his
.oat collar, and Aston said:
"'You are an American citizen and
are welcome. Once | was like you,
md didn't care a continental for any
,ody, but in a moment of passion |
enounced my country, swore al
to this blawsted country, and