davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Rosebud County news. [volume] (Forsyth, Mont.) 1901-1906, 1905-01-19
HAD UNIQUE DEVICE
BANK WATCHMAN'S SCHEME OF
ROBBERY REALLY CLEVER.
Mysterious Disappearance of 500 Bills
Remained Unsolved Until Death Of
Highly Esteemed Employe-Was
Never in Life Caught Mapping.

The cashier of bank in a western
town discovered one day at balancing
time that his cash was an even 500
short. He went over his notes Of that
denomination. after trying to account
for it in various ways without success,
and found one of them was missing.
minute search failed to find it,
and the loss had to be charged up in
the way such things are.
Some weeks later the same amount
was missing again in the same mys-
FERROUS way.
When it happened third time
this after a long interval-the cashier
was replaced by another man; not
that the officers distrusted him, but
they wanted to see if the presence of
the new cashier would make a differ.
ence.
1t didn't The 500 bills disappeared
one at a time at irregular intervals,
and no one could ever account fol-
their loss in any way.
After this had been going on for d
couple Of years the night Waterman,
who was also the janitor Of the bank.
died. No one ever thought of connect
ing him with the disappearance of the
bills, and the day after his death the
local papers printed short obituary
| notices OF his career as a servant Of
the bank, telling in how high esteem
he was held by its officers.
Curiously enough, with his death
| nf or =.
ance of the bills. No one in the bank,
however, connected the two things.
| Several months after the janitors
| death the bank was fitted out with
new office furniture, and when the
workmen ripped away the woodwork
of the cashiers desk the reason for
the disappearance of the money was
explained.
Under the sloping top of the desk
was steel plate suspended from its
center by a piece of stout twine that
ran through ring and then led down
between the framework Of the parti
ton to the cellar, where it ended al
another ring caught on nail in one
Of the joists.
A few moments of experimenting
showed how the janitor had worked
his highly original graft" When he
needed money he would open the
empty cash drawer at night, lower the
plate and cover it's under surface will
paste. Then he would haul it III
Under the sloping desk top.
The next day when the cashier was
away from the desk at luncheon
which he always ate at table neal
his window, the janitor would g
down in the cellar. unlock the core
and let the plate, which was suspend
, ed directly over the compartment con
tanning the 500 bills, drop down OF
the top of one. The paste woult
make it adhere firmly to the plate
, and then he would haul it up unde
the desk top. At night he could re
, move it from the plate at his leisure
, OF course, he ran the risk Of hav
t ing the cashier go to the drawer Will
he was working his device But tn
janitor had studied the officers habit
+ so closely that he never was caugh
, napping-New York Press.
Rosebud County news. [volume] (Forsyth, Mont.) 1901-1906, 1905-01-19
An Imposing 6y-Product.

School Teacher (showing off her
best boy before visitors)-Now, Per-
kins can you name some of the impor-
taut by-products of the steel industry?
Perkins-Yes'm; Carnegie's libra
ries.-Puck.
Rosebud County news. [volume] (Forsyth, Mont.) 1901-1906, 1905-01-19
An Awful Jolt,

Dudleigh-I-aw-be to tllini;-
aw-weally ought to get nawwicd
doncher know.
Hammersly-Weil, l can see no rca
son why you shouldn't. Now that i
is leap year, why don't you pick OF
some good man and propose to hi:-. .:
Chicago News.
Rosebud County news. [volume] (Forsyth, Mont.) 1901-1906, 1905-01-19
u Does on Houses.

DO you see that striking looking
woman with the veil?"
EYES,"
"Do you know why she wears the
veil?'
mo. Homely?"
mo. She's afraid the sun might
blister the paint. "-Cleveland Plain
Dealer.
Rosebud County news. [volume] (Forsyth, Mont.) 1901-1906, 1905-01-19
tyranny.

She-I think we might as well break
off our engagement.
He-Why?
She-Because you just say why
I'm such a cold-blooded way.-Philadel-
phia Bulletin.
Rosebud County news. [volume] (Forsyth, Mont.) 1901-1906, 1905-01-19
CoWarGiy.

Lets hide in the work basket" scii
the mischieyous garter to the fun-lo
ing stocking.
mot by long shot," replied tn
isle thread. "I'll be darncd if Go. =
Town Topics.
Rosebud County news. [volume] (Forsyth, Mont.) 1901-1906, 1905-01-19
DiSFIGURlNG ULCER.
People Looked at Her in Amusement
Pronounced incurabie - Face
Now Clear as Ever-Tkanks
God for Cuticura.

Mrs. p. Hackett of 400 Van Buren,
St, Brooklyn, N. Y, says: 81 wish
10 give thanks for the marvellous cure
of my mother by Cuticura. She had
a severe ulcer, which physicians had
pronounced incurable. 1t was a ter
riblc Disagreement. and people would
stand in amazement and look after
her After there was no hope from
doctors she began using Cuticura
Soap, Ointment and Pills, and now,
thank God, she is completely cured
and her face is as smooth and clear
AS ever.
Rosebud County news. [volume] (Forsyth, Mont.) 1901-1906, 1905-01-19

If woman hasn't anything elst
to talk about she talks about all the
time.
Rosebud County news. [volume] (Forsyth, Mont.) 1901-1906, 1905-01-19

TO CURE A COLD IN ONE nay
Take Laxative Bromo Quinine TaJlets til drug
gSts refund the money If 1t fails to cure. l.. Vi.
Groves signature is on each box. 2Jc.
Rosebud County news. [volume] (Forsyth, Mont.) 1901-1906, 1905-01-19

Mrs. Winslow's Soothing Syrup.
Tor children teethng, softens the gums, reduces &c.
Illumination, allays pain, wind collie. CSC Ous5.o
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1905-12-14
ARCTIC MAIL DELIVERY.
settler 5000 Miles from Ottawa Has
Letters Carried by Dog Teams.

Fort Mcpherson Postoffice, Arctic
Circle" The idea Of addressing n let
ter in such way and having it doliv-
cred by agents of the postoffice depart
ment would have been deemed absurd
and inpracticablc at one time SAYS the
Toronto Globe. To-day it has become
an established fact. A few years ago
Edmonton was the remotest point il,
the Northwest Territories reached by
the Canadian postoffice. Beyond no at
tempt had been made to extend postal
facilities. Nevertheless there was a
scattered population throughout the
vast area between Edmonton and the
Arctic regions wholly unscrved by the
postoffcc. Quietly but steadily, how
ever. the postollice is embra cling this
great eNpanse of territory in the postal
area, and has now in successful opera
ton a postoffic, al Fort Mcpherson, a
point on the Mackenzie river not far
from Beaufort sea. situated in latitud,
liN north, distance more thln 1000 miles
northcrly from Edmonton and nearly
j,Nh miles from ottawa Between Fort
Mcpherson and Edmonton the department
has been gradually establishing other
pOstoffces. but owing to their great dis
lance from each other has supplement
ed their work by arranging with the
couriers to deliver mail matter to set
tiers on the way between the earious
offices.
Fancy rural delivery in the Arctic re-
eiona' Yet that is practically what is
happening. 1t is less than four years
since the department inaugurated its
policy of having mail services and post
olices north of Edmonton. 1t began
by establishing IA mail service between
Edmonton and Athabasca Landing. a
point on the Athabasca river about 100
miles from the former place. This
service having been successfully ear
rcd out, the department il the follow
ing year established II mail service he
tween AthabaSca Landing and Peace
river crossing and Spirit river. a dis
lance OF seventy-fve miles: also "A ser
vice from Peace river crossing to Fort
Nermillion, distance of about .3
miles In 1903 successful efforts ere
adopted TO reach Fort Chipcwvan, a
point on Lake Athabasca, distant 4o(
miles farther north. Apart from tns
services, the question was whether
they could be successfully performed
throughout the winter. The country
h.ing without roads of any kind, and
covered with ice and snow, the only
practicable means OF transportation are
dog teams. But three years experience
in the shorter distance between Edmon-
ton and Fort Chipewyan having shown
the probability Of this system. last
fail it was determined to make the bold
attempt to send his majesty's mails
throughout the winter practically as far
north as the Arctic sea The expert
mont carried out throughout last win
/ ter has proved successful. and now a
permanent post office is in operation at
Fort Mcpherson. served during the win
| ter by dog teams.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1905-12-14
UNCLE JOE AT THE THEATRE.

Uncle Joe Rich of Guildhall. says the
Windsor Journal, was a character. He
was well-to-do farmer. and kept open
house to his friends. Rotund and jovial
and dressed in his Sunday suit. blue
swallow-tal coat with brass buttons,
buff vest and black silk hat. he was n
noticeable figure. lie attended all the
dances, could cut a pigeon wing 10
"beat the band" and was a great favor
lite with the boys.
one fail after the crops We're stored,
they invited him to take n weeks trim
to Boston to see the sights with them.
One night after supper. which was wash
ed down with liberal supply of cham
pagne, "l'ncle joe was taken to the
theatre. the party occupying a box.
The old man was at his hest. As he
sat down and looked the audience over,
the orchestra struck up an operate Sc
lection. He wanted to know what kind
OF cusscd tune" that was, anyway.
This selection was followed By another.
He wiped his beamng face and bald
head with red silk bandanna which
he pulled out Of his silk tile and walk
ed around uneasily.
Finally he could stand it no longer
Leaning over the box. he shouted. way
ing his hat: SAY, MIR. Fiddlers. II
you've got those fiddlcs tuned give us
Fishers Hornpipc' or Devils Dream .
This brought down the house, and the
hand struck up the music the old man
wanted.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1905-12-14
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.

Pc sure of the foundation before at
tempting to put up BLUFF
1t is an art to paint work of art and
it is still more of an art to sell it,
No AlonZo a barber shop and "a hack
stand are not necessarily synonymous.
If "A woman is afflicted with klepto-
mania she always takes something for
il.
But the world doesn't have much love
for the lover who loves only himself.
Some women are so curious they will
listen to advice just to find out what
it's like.
1T least once in every mans career he
is ambitious to patent some freak in
vention.
The man who is always going to do a
lot of great things usually ends 10y doing
Is, few small ones.
Occasionally you meet man who asks
for only half a chance; but the majority
prefer their chances whole.
There's something radically wrong with
the woman who is unable to find an
excuse for good. old-fashioned cry at
least once a week.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1905-12-14
THE PEOPLES MEDICINES.
The Fight ON "Tntent" Medicines DIX
cusScd.

The business of manufacturing home
remcdies-so-callcd patent medicines
is under fire. Sweeping Indictments
have been made against it, Newspapers
have been accused nf being in terminal
alliance with M, dicine manufa turers
for the purpose Of foisting on the pub
lie something that. ii is claimed. the
public would bc better off without.
In "A word the medicine business l..
summed up 10y certain alleged reformcrs
as fraud" And the newspapers are ac.
cuscd of conduct involving moral tur.
pitude in connection with it.
So sweeping is this indictment that in
it are included all of the remedies ana
preparations which are manufactured in
large lots, advertised direct to the user
to he taken without tho prescription of
"A physician. 1t includes all of the fam
lily remedies" some Of which have been
in constant use for nifty years, and many
of which have had years of success.
A 'pntent" medicine is no different
from a physicians medicine-it IL a
physicians medicine. made on II largo
scale. Into its composition enters the
drugs used by physicians in proportions
which medical science has taught to be
correct. one bottle or patent pre-
paration is exactly like every other
bottle; only the best drugs are used and
the methods OF composition are the best
known to science.
patent" medicines form a system OF
medication that lacks nothing by com
parison with other systems and which
has many features to especially commend
1t. The formula under which practically
every patent" medicine is made IL the
favorite prescription OF some physician
who used it with such success in his
private practice that 1t was deemed
commercially expedient to manufacture
It on a large scale
The first sale of an article bringing
but 25, so or 70 cents or 81 never means
profit. 1t Is only when an article RE-
peats" that It becomes profitable. ana il
never repeats unless It Is meritorious
A large number of people. comparative.
~. might be fooled once, but the num-
Der that can be fooled twice on the
same thing 10 infiniteslrnal. Commercial.
~, It doesn't pay to try to fool the peo-
pie. Tho history OF the commercial
world proves that.
"Patent" medicines have repeated
for years. Many Of tho preparations
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1905-12-14
WITH DICKENS AT THE CHRISTMAS
HEARTH.

Before the Christmas hearth muse
alone,
And visions of the past. for grave and
gay.
Rise from the rudy Goals. Outside. the
or homeless winds is chidden 10y the
lay
Swce,-sung by children who keep holi-
day.
Making the seasons mood their very
And slowly. while ! gaze and dream ana
Less lonesome, do the sights and sounds
OF earth
Fade and my fancy ~anders to and fro
With IL great Master Of lament ana
nrth
Who waved his wand to Gid the Long
ago
\ wondrous Company. Micawber smiles
In spite of poverty. and Little Nell.
TOO frail flower, travels her weary
miles.
Then falls on sleep; and David tries to
The trials Of the young; now Pickwick' :
spell
Makes laughter easy; on pinnacle
or sacrifice sits Carton. midst war :
wilcs.
Now the air sweetcns for those brothers
twain.
The blithesome Cheerybles, have
preached their creed
OF kindness: honest Taploy halls again
A world too pleasant; while their
horses speed,
The Wellers make the welliin ring in
deed:
I.o. Dedlock House looms darkly through
the rain.
And look. the tiny dressmakor limps by;
And she eternal type of faithfulness,
Dorrt. whom prisons do not daunt; her
Is for her father; next, in seamans
dress
Quaint Captain Cutie lifts his hool,
to bless
His darlings: Barkis at low tide must
die
Drolls. villains, gentle folk OF all degrees,
Make populous the air, an hundred
strong;
Last comes, az fits the season, Scroogc,
his knees
A-tremble. Till he harks the Christmas
song
or Love. and knows that spite and
greed are wrong.
And how that charity Is more than these.
VII.
Master OF human hearts. No Christmas
tide
Whose chants arc not the sweeter and
whose cheer
Is not more blest since Dickens lived and
died!
The SAVIOR OF his teaching makes each
year
Richer in homely virtues. doth endear
Man unto man; hence, shall he long
abide.
Richard Burton in the December Critic
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1905-12-14

are needed. 1t will pay 10 spend the time
and labor necessary to remove the dead.
crooked, and diseased trees. together
with the weed trees so that the remain
ing stand may he composed of good tim
her trees in sufficient number. under
conditions favorable for their best de-
velopiucnl This can be done gradually.
as the material can he utilized
When once the Improvement cutting
has brought the wood lot into business
like shane. further operations should be
made with view to reproduction and Il
lasting supply. Care should he taken IN
telling. working up. and hauling out
wood to do AS little damage as possible
tn young growth. If reproduction is To
take place from seed. the proper location
of seed trees must be considered.
Where the forest is composed mainly
of such trees as oak and chestnut. which
sprout we'll from the stump, il may be
advisable to cut most of the GOod-sized
trees over part Of the wood lot for the
purpose Of raising a crop of sprouts.
Such sprouts grow rapidly and produce
good poles. posts. and ties nj a compar-
atvrly carly age. But the stumps should
be- cut low and slanting. SO as to prevent
rottinS and secure strong and numerous
shoots.
There arc n number OF thinning sys-
tens some Of which may suit the re-
duiicmcnts of one wood lot but not those
of another. By careful reading of bull
lctin No. ~ OF the forest service. entitled
THE Wood Lot the owner can familiar
lie himself with these and choose which
ever one his own woodlorc and observa-
tion suggest as the best. Or. should the
owner desire a special plan for the man.
agemcnt of his wood lot. he should make
application to the Forester, United States
Department of Agriculture. for the co..
operation Of the forest service.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1905-12-14
A HOLIDAY WARNING

One word. Myrtyla. IL thou hast
In mind a yacht for me.
Reflect what dreadfully bad taste
A gift like that would be-
And haply II thou dost behold
An auto-car with Joy.
Endow me not. through lavish gold.
With such a kingly toy!
surfeit me not with real estate
On Forty-second street;
For such gift. though doubtless great
Were rather indiscreet.
The spirit, love. of Christmas Day
More genuine would be
For humble gifts-what did you say
A necktie? Hully gee
WALLACE IRWIN In the New Yorl
Mail
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1905-12-14
NEW TWAINIsMs.
THE VETERAN HCMORIST STILL
BUBBLING AT SEVENTY,

TIE VETERAN HCMORIST STILL
BUBBLING AT SEVENTY.
I remember my first birthday we'll;
whenever think of it it is with indig.
nation. Everything was so crude, so
unesthetic. I even went to my first ban
quot without hair teeth, or clothes.
$50
have achieved my seventy years in
the usual way--by sticking strictly to a
scheme Of life which would kill anybody
else.
We have no permanent habits unit
we are forty. Then they begin &c
harden, presently they petrify.
I have made it a rule TO go to bed
when there wasn't anybody left to sit
up with. and l have made it a rule to
get up when I had TO-
In the matter of diet l have been per-
sistently strct-in sticking to the things
which didn't agree with me.
$3.50
l particularly wish to urge this upon
YOU. which think is wisdom, that if YOU
find YOU can't make seventy by any but
an uncomfortable road. don't you go.
When they take off the Pullman and
retire you to the smoker. put on your
things. count your checks, and get out
at the first way station where there :
a cemetery.
have made it rule never to smoke
more than one cigar at a time. began
to smoke during my fathers lifetime.
and was discreet lie passed from this
life early in 1857, when | was a shade
past eleven; ever since then | have
smoked publicly.
AS an example to others. and not that
care for moderation myself. it has al
ways been my rule never tn smoke when
asleep and never to refrain when awake,
have never bought cigars with life
belts around them.
As for drinking, / have no rule about
that. My father took a drug store for a
debt, and it made cod liver oil cheaper
than the other breakfast foods. We had
nine barrels of it. and it lasted me seven
years. Then ! was weaned. The rest OF
the family had to get along with rhubarb
and ipecac because l was the pet. ]
was the standard oil trust.
Morals are an requirement like music.
like foreign language. like piety. poker,
para lysis--no man is born with them. !
started poor: 1 hadn't single moral,
not even an insurance moral
PIER 20.
wish you we'll in all affection, and
that when you in your turn shall arrive
at Pier &c you may step aboard yonr
waiting ship with n reconcilod spirit ana
lay your course toward the sinking sun
with Il contented heart.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1905-12-14
800 Reward 800.

The readers Of this paper will. Be pielAed 10
that science has been able 70 cure IL 81 its
u ,sSs os sH's sasd
cal fraternity. 'Catarrh being . constitutional
iisease. requires . conititutiensl treatment
Iirectiy upon the blood and mucous surfaces Of
10 system, thereby destroying the foundation
1.-THE disease, and giving the pstient strength
allure 10 dolng is work. The propristors have
much faith n its curative powers. that they
NeP One Hundred Dollars TOT any case, that 4
ills to cure. esnd for list OF tssttmouials.
Address, p. J. CHENEY D co.. Toledo, O..
r0old ~ DNsEats. 10.
Halls Family Pulls are the best.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1905-12-14
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR.

REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR
1t is a terrible nuisance to have a repu.
ta'ion to live up to-
Wit is like a wonlan-most of the charm
is in the way you dress II up.
What Is criticism II you give IL ia
somebody else Is outrageous abuse II
somebody else gives It to you.
a woman's idea OF heaven Is where she
could have half a dozen children without
ever having to be bothered with hus.
band.
Nobody thinks man ought TO like Ia
20 into a hospital TO have his legs cut
off, yet they expect him TO welcome
York PresA
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1905-12-14
HIS QUALIFICATIONS.

Senior partner-I think that office boy
OF ours would make good policeman.
Junior partner--Bccause why?
Senior partner-Because he's never
around when wantcd.-Chicago News.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1905-12-14
MAY END THERE.

mo matter what you undertake. yol
have To begin at the bottom"
"G'wan! I don't
what Ia your business?'
I'm a notwithstanding Leader
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1905-12-14

have been bought time after time by
families who wouldn't try to get along
without some. at least. OF the patent
medicines ready for instant use.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1905-12-14
Fountain Pens
ct FREE PRESS STORE
CLUBBING LIST.
The Free Press and other Periodicals. 1t
Low Rates to One Address.

The Weekly FREE PRESS can be OH
tanned in combination with other leading
periodicals at low rates. To prevent un
that after the subscription has begun
notice of a change of address. or ANYTHING
concerning the receipt Of the other period
icais, should be sent directly to the oftica
OF that periodical The Weekly FREE
PRESS and any one OF the following
periodicals will be sent to any one address
Tor one year az the prices annexed:
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1905-12-14

Surplus & Profits $125,OOO
The Saint Paul globe., 1905-01-31
PERSONAL

PERSONAL
LADIEsI MRS. WAeNER's PERIODIC
Pills are the best; safe. speedy regula-
tor; they are "A Boon to Woman
bringing relief and happiness; price,
$500; obtained only at Office or by mail;
particulars free Mrs. T. Wagner, 431a
East Third st, ST. Paul, Mimi.
ROOMS ADVERTISED in THE GLOBE
WILL BE REGISTERED IN THE
GLOBES RENTAL LIST FREE OF
CHARGE. WHY NOT SECURE THE
TWO SERVICES FOR THE PRICE
OTHERWISE ASKED FOR ONE? AD-
VERTlSE YOUR ROOMS OR BOARD
IN THE GLOBE.
FEMALE DISEASES CURED
Dr.. Wheeler. the cid reliable specialist;
43 years experience. Call on or write
the doctor, Room 306 Globe Bldg, Min
neapolis. Mimi; tel T. G. 335.
r. II. BY, M. D., sPEcIALIsrDls-
eases of women; all Irregularities cor
rected; new book, 25c; all you need to
know; private home. Minneapolis Of
flee, 412 Nicollet av
DIR. HiNz.
Specialist in rupture and diseases of man.
Century bldg. 4th st. and 1st av. .Mpls
TIE GLOBES FREE ROOM AND
board list will help you to locate pleas
antly. Call at the Office.