The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1905-06-11
Whinls of the Idler.
PLENTY OF SLEEP AND GOOD MUSIC.

|
why people in the country should ever
| want to- come to town.-oven 10 SEQ q
circus or wild west show--is more than
some of us can possibly understand.
When we city folks whose minds arc
'honeycombcd with care and f1ayed out
| with petty business worries, find our
| selves shifting the redocnce OF the rural
districts, we have to grit Our teeth and
| clcnch our hands to resist the tempta-
tion to resign our Jobs and Join the
simple minded bucolic hosts forever.
Apparently nobody ever worries or
gets hopping mad in the country. When
things go wrong-if, they ever do--the
disgruntled natives simply take off their
coats, retire to a shady room, drive out
the dirt daubers and yellow Jackets and
take nap
Tho snooze is the universal panacen
for all fleshy and pecuniary Ills. Come
what may, the rural citizen always finds
himself able to tear off few yards OF
sleep.
II you nsk him what length Of time his
daily duties consume, he will proudly.
II not reproachfully tell you that unlike
city folks, he rises at "sun up" SO as to
get good start. This Is the truth too,
but he fails to mention the nap which
helps him to digest his buttermills and
country nam anu DUllcu uilipus diAN VI -
bread and canary coorcd pies.
And he likewise fails to announce that
sometime near $3.50 o'clock ut night, just
when the whippoorwlls appear to be
getting drowsy and the Kerosene lamps
seem to be growing blinky, his mouth
opens with Il cavernous yarn and he
suggests rest after tho days arduous
labors
In Virginia the countryman who can't
and doesn't sleep is a seven days Won
def-in fact. creature never yet cap
tured alive. And in Spotsylvania county.
where this writer CLEANS all his agricul-
tural information, he knows a bunch OF
Rip Van Wrinkles. male and female. who
threaten to put all the anodynes and
opiates out Of business. Crook your fin
ger at them and they begin to nod and
look Woody. and in fifteen minutes they
have all gone to roost.
Now the funny part about the whole
business is that city visitors, instead OF
being shocked by sucl, doings, open.
few feet of mouth in a sympathetic yarn
themselves and chirp up In the happiest
tones that they believe they are tired.
too, and are perfectly willing to measure
lengths with a corn shuck mattress. So
much of this sort of snoozing business
goes on that 1t is shame to expect the
crops to grow when everybody else IS
at rest.
1t is my belief that during the Civil
War, when Spostylvania was one grand
slaughter pen, with a vast horde OF
Yanks and Johnny Rebs adjusting loose at
one another with muskets, the whole
shooting match was the somnambulistic
feat Of bunch of soldiers who didn't
know what they We're doing.
Z ic ton tO venture the StlfOnlSe
that twenty minutes after the shooting
was over, all hands were being Rugged
up in the embrace of Morpheus, who
has a wonderful political machine In
this section. Indeed he could carry every
precinct on a platform declaring for
twenty-four hours Of sleep every day,
with occasional maps on the side.
During the brief intervals when this
writer has been awake in YSp.otsylvania.
he has found the people about to go to
sleep an amiable, pious, respectful con-
tingent who would shy off from ,propo-
sitIon to say harsh word with as much
horror as they would attempt to pound
a chunk Of dynamite I on aGblacksmith's
anvil.
A gentler lot Of souls never ate and
clrowsed. They are SO full OF the milk
of human kindness that the whole pop
ulace seems like onea'grand dairy and
ClcdLlCi WAthSas ~''S 80
ment.
Down in the section where take my
long sleep every summer, the somnam-
bulists tell about a mana FOX hunter,
too-who Is so big hearted that ne hao
his house built three hundred yards from
the road so his hound dogs wouldn't DIS
turb passers- by. Itfshould not be under
stood, however, that this! charitable NOR
tai keeps fierce dogs. Quite the contrary,
,,,,t,, ,,1c co a f1iQ
ciliatory that when they see a strange
sleep walker approaching. they cudgel
the sod with their vacllatng. philan thro-
pic tails until the dust arising from the
looks like the clouds raised by
n simeon No sub, there are no forward,
trouser- nlpping, clothes shifting purps
in this soporiferous old county.
A few days ago while this writer was
doing a somnambulistic stunt down
cedar-fringed road, he attract
ed the attention OF a black and tan |
hound, who forthwith recognized him as
a stranger and was sufficiently interest
cd to cut short a siesta In a sand pile |
and attempt to investigate. But the dog
kept his curiosity within bounds. He fol-
lowed at a distance Of 200 yards and
never once came nearer call that pref
ty polite for a dog, especially as the
critter doubtless mistook the pedestrian
Tor Il poHc.
Perhaps the only living things in Spot
sylvania which find time to keep thor
oughly awake In the summer months are
the pie bald hooking bird which for hours
every morning devote their time to inri-
tating mothers congresses and female
The hooking birds in this favored,
peace producing county all speak eight
or ten languages before they are ten
months old and their vocal attachments
are little short of miraculous Before a
Hedging has learned to recognize its pas
voice we'll the old gent gets to speaking
a new tongue. And the lady mocking |
birds are just as tickle. They SASS their
husbands In different language every |
TWO horrs-an innovation well worthy |
of imitation among people.
There Is something indcscrbably low |
able about these feathered mmics. TO +,
begin with, they seem to trust people and |
to suspect no harm of mankind. Ono