davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27
An Insinustfon.

Diggs-''I hear you have sold your
restaurant Wasn't It a moneymak,
err"
Biggs-@Yesi was making $50
daily"
Diggs---Then what vas your rea,
son for dispOsing Of it2=
Biggs--Oh, / was compelled to sell
It on account Of poor health
Digs HUH Why didn't Won
take your meals somewhere eIseq1
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27
- Of - HauIina.

Last year coal constituted about 40
per cent Of the total tonnage Of the
American railways To carry a ton In
England from the Yorkshire coal fields
to London, a distance OF 15s miles,
costs S1-S7, while coal is carried from
the Carbondale coal region in Illinois
to Chicago, 2T6 miles, for 3 cents a
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27
Enolish Law on -poas.

Henry Robertson was fined SIS on
landing in England for eOntravening
the importation Of Dogs Order, 1901
Mr. Robertson, while on a yachting
cruise, landed his Scotch terrier in
dog By such landing. and a license
was required to bring it into England
again
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

OF an attack On each and every Oc-
easiOn the results obtained were just
as satisfactory as when the pills we're
first brought to my notice. I just as
emphatically endorse the preparation
to-day as did over two years ago."
Foster Milburn Co, Buffalo, n. Y,
prOprietOrs. For sale by all druggists,
price so cents per box.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27
- - - -

The recent riots IN Innsbruck did
not last long because the Italian gov
eminent, which knows that It cannot
have the Tyrol, vas moderate n Its
remonstrancess and the austrian su-
thorities do not IKE Gemonstrati0ns
in which the Students huIrah Tor Ger
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27
EriendIv suonesfion

Wfndig--I don't know what We are
going 70 do with our youngest boy"
What's the troubleZ1
indig-He's getting so we can't
believe a word he says
JOblots-.sFhy don't you get him a
job in the prediction department Of
the government weather bureau?"
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27
60 iospitaIs % Herses.

Field hospitals for sick and disabled
horses is to be part Of the war equip
ment Of a British army in future. Two
have been formed in England, and the
system is proving satisfactory in In
dia- The japanese have adopted It in
Manehuria. where the loss OF animals
is only 6 per cent
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27
Rara Cod Thing.

'sAm using ALIENS FOOT-EASE, and
can truly say would not have been without
it so long, had known the relief it would
give nv aching feet. I think il a rare good
thing for anyone having sore or tired feet
Mrs. MatiIda Holtwert, Providence, r. I %
Sold by all Druggists, CSC ISL today.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27
Mixed FARMING
WHEAT RAISING
RAHGHEEa


Three great pursuits have again shown wonderful
results On the Free Homestead Lands Of Western
Canada this year
Hsgnfhcent Cltnste-farmers piOWtng IN their shirt
sleeves n the middle OF EOTember-
"Auars bound 20 be more than pleased With the
GlaI results Of the past seasons harT ests -EItract
Coal. wood, water, hay IN abundance SCHOOL,
churches, uaTksts convenient
Apply for information to Superintendent Of Immi-
grafton. Ottawa Canada- 20 Eurh0rfEed Canadian
Governments AEeur-T- V Bennett, so New FOrE
LIE Building, Omaha, Nebraska-
PIsass say where yoa saw this advertisement
Government Agent. < Crawford, No Is
". Ninth Street. Kansas City. No.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Twenty years after a girl wOuldt
marry a man he feels like apOlOgiZing
TO his grandmother about it
A woman begins her acquaintance
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

In spite Of strong Efforts made to
Increase the p01ltry culture In Eng.
land, the importation OF eggs has again
increased during the last year.
angunting IN value 70 $40 see. IS
against sz9.z23 900 during the year
1902
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Congressman Robinson is authority
for the story Of an interesting device
invented by the editor OF a country
newspaper in one Of the little interior
towns Of Pennsylvania The editor
who tried TO make his journal bright
and interesting. was kept in hot water
constantly by indignant residents Of
the town, who disputed his printed
statements, and who were always
looking for the editor Ito give him a
piece Of their minds" This became
so annoying that he finally engaged
an old gentleman who was stone deaf
as his chief assistant Whenever an
indignant subscriber called to protest
against the course Of the editor, he
was at once referred to the deaf jour
nalist, who sat and listened to the
inevitable TRADE without a change OF
cOuntenance.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Some grocers say they don't keep De-
hance Starch because they have n stock
in hand Of u o. brands. which they know
cannot be sold to g customer who has
once used the IS OF. pkg. Defiance Starch
for same money.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

When q girl tells 8 young man that
the best is none too good for her Z IS
UP 10 him 10 Ohsr himself
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

All women are born refoTmers and
they want to begin on some man
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

won't shake out or blow OUT BY using
Defiance Starch you obtain better results
than possible with any other brand and
one-third more for same money.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Veteran Joshua Heller, Of 7Os south
Walnut street, Urbana, III, says: IN
the fan OF 1899. after taking Doan's
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

When a high salaried officer finds it
necessary to seek the man you may
expect to see thieves trying to break
into Jail
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

has no business to play the prOdigsl
son
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

You can't always tel from the melan-
ehOly WOmans signs how much she
weighs.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Automobiles are good things to teach
men how to take long walks bach
home.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

A woman can't understand Why her
husband has to work 50 hard 20 make
both ends meet when he Il 50 much
smarter than other men.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

A good woman is usually too good
for any man-but fortunately she
know it
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

is long and still have q bad record at
night
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Frequently a girl's good looks are
responsible for her lack Of good man
ners.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

A man in trouble is apt 70 discover
that his friends are not as friendly zs
they might be.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Cupid is a sorry leader; after lead
ing people into trouble he leaves them
70 fight II out themselves.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

A GUARANTEED CURE FOR PILES.
TfchinE- Blind Bleeding PrJrrudfnE PIIes- Yer
druggist viii refund u1oncy II PAZO OTNT1LEET
fails 70 cure yOu IN % u days SOC.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

If church pews were like sleeping
car berths more men would go.
A woman can't get awful fat without
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

A bachelor physician says the mi
crObeS in kisses are often fatal-at
lcast they often develop matrimonial
germs
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Many a man who says he has great
presence Of mind manages successfully
to conceal il.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

When a girl is kissing man against
her viii she would be sure to scream
If she weren't afraid her mother might
hear
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

An actress may not be an angel her
self but she doesn't object 10 having
one lowering around at times
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

In the matrimonial gamble the sure
is a high ball.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

A mans house is his castle unless It
Is IL his Wife's name.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

When a man is working for himself
he doesn't have to employ a time
keeper.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

The Hottest impulse most men have
realizing that a mans knees were not
built to be a coal wagon scales.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

A wife IS a powerful reason foI
never having a good time.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Love is 5lind-and TIE bosnely girl
Is glad OF il
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

There are still many opportunities
for young men; the trusts haven't been
able to grab all Of them.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

A wOman's favOrite writer is a hus-
band who is capable Of writing checks.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

and a girl over his not proposing
What puzzles a woman is whether
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

A man gets nervous over proposing
On the other fellow
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Anyway, one-half Of the world
knows that the other half is looking
for the best Of it.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

A lottery is contrary 70 law and yet
the marriage game goes merTily on.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Money talks, but that OF a miser
doesn't make extravagant- speeches.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Insomnia is seldom caused by the
things a man doesn't say
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

sDr. David Ksnnedy-s Favorfts RsmsdJ
gave prom and complete re- lef fro dFs1s
liver dsrlnEsuseut h T Tro-bricse. Earisul NJ
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

To CURE a COLD ~ ONE DAY
Take Laxative Br0mo Quiuias Tablets All drug
Elsts refund the money n Dc falls % cure z ".
Groves Signature e on each box sc
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Many q train Of tbougbt esIllss no
freight
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

It's awful hard for a woman 10 see
angels put a towel On their head when
they do their busting
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

The roll Of honor is free from i'm
pure baking powder.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

A battleshfp in the hand is worth
two ultimatums IN the bush
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Whatsoever the foolish farmer sOws.
that shall the bunkO man reap
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

When a man shines in society he
seldom shines in business
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

The man who was born great may
not die that way
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Where there's a win there's ATTIC be
q won't and=a couple Ct lawyer
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Truth is all right in its lvay, but fat
terry is often more satisfactory.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27
SPECIAL NOTICE

that there is any difference getween
playing whist and crOquet.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

It's hard to be "a good fellow and
a model husband too.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Mrs.. FFI1uIow-s so0thEnE syrup.
For Chfdreu testhnzs EoftenE the guns reduces n
EEu1ation. alzFB pzns cures Ead eoii- 25ca bottlg
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Representative Curtis told a COM
paniOn story to that of his cOnsulta-
ton with a palmist in Southern Kan
sas- The palmist assured him that he
would make a good public speaker if
he kept at it long enough.
"A lawyer friend with me on that
occasion. said Mr. Curtis. had his
own hand read at my urgent request.
The palmist studied the lines intently
for a time before making several OBJ
servatiOns, the last Of which was:
You are evidently a barber
No said my friend.
Then what are yOu?'
A lawyer
But said the lady. much to my
friends discontinue, viii you tell me
what is the difference between being
shaved by a barber and skinned by a
lawyer "
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

The people who trust to luck often
90 hungry
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Statesmen who also ran are natur-
ally slow to predict a bright future for
their country
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

After a girl has refused him twelve
times a supeTstitiOus youth viii quit
proposing.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

No. Cordelia, the little dears are not
seen at stag parties.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Catarrh is a systemic disease cur
able only by systemic treatment. A
remedy that cures catarrh must aim
directly at the depressed nerve cen
ters- This is what Peruna does.
Peruna Immediately invfgorates the
nerTe-centers which give vitality to
the mucous membranes. Then catarrh
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

moved from clothing with the aid Of a
small pair Of scissors.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Some -sgecessfui men are 50 per cent
backbone and some others g per cent
cheek
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Lots Of people pray for the poor
and let it go at that.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

A joke is always a joke when II is
winner is bachelorhood.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

When a BidcWeT begins to tell bis
troubles TO a widow she knows be IS
going 70 ask her 70 share them
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Its a wise industrial stock that knows
its own par
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Money talks, but the phonograpI
also speaks for itself.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

A clear conscience is Hezsr 1nder a
cloud.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Keep your temper if it is good, and
don't lose it If it is bad.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

A word TO the unEise is superauous
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Weak solutions may be all right in
chemistry, but they don't 90 in poll
tics.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

UNDOAIA Hair Tonic viii lend to
your hair that soft fluffy appearance
appreciated by people Of good taste
and refinement.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Robert R Roberts, n. D., Wash J
tnstOn, d. c., writes: I
Through my own experience
Jas well as k7af Of many of MI
friends and scquaiGfancss who
] lave been cured Or relieved Of CO
= EerTh BY the use Of Harfman's
fPeru1S, I cEu confidently recon-.
mend IL 20 those suffering from such
! di80rderS, and have no HesfEaff07 IN
prescribing II to my patients. -
I Robsrf r. Roberts.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

A mans Self-respecJ is often pune
tured by the suspicious OF his neigh
bOrs.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Youth is going to tackle the things
tomorrow that age finished yesterday
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

On a recent claim day in the House
while the few interested members
were doing business a bunch of South
ern Representatives sat in the Demo
cratic clOakrOOm and talked Of claims
they knew about
Funniest one I ever heard Of said
Texan. was put in by man down
at Austin. He was a stranger. They
found him one night at one Of the
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

It's the woman who doesn't show heI
age who hesitates to tell it
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

If ignorance is bliss, the fellow who
knows it all must be q fool.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27
MEDICAL EXAMINER
Of the UNITED States treasury Recommends
PezTu-na.
another Prominent Physician Uses
and Endorses Pe-ru-na.
HRzFu-na,


n r. FYELLYE JORDAF, Wedi-
cal Examiner OF the u. S. Treas
Hry Department.. graduate OF Co
lumbia College, and who served three
years at West Point, has the follow
ing to say OF Peruna-
ALLOW me 60 express my graffs
@Ede 20 you for the benefit derived
from your wonderful remedy.
One short msnfs mas brought
Horfh q Yasf change and I now
consider myself q well 6zEn sf1eF
months Of suffering. Fellow Suf.
fersES, Peruna will cure yoa.
A constantly increasing number Of
physicians prescribe Peruna IN their
practice IL has proven its merits so
thoroughly that even the doctors have
overcome their prejudice against so
called patent medicines and recon-
mend tito their patients.
Peruna occupies a unique position
IN medical science. II IS the only in
ternal systemic catarrh remedy
known to the medical profession to
day. CatarTh, as everyone viii admit,
is the cause OF one-half the diseases
which af1ict mankind. Catarrh and
catarrhal diseases afiict one-haIf Of
the people Of United States.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

A genius is a poor man who car
manage to live without working
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

Most Of Us expect better obituaT!
notices than are coming to Us.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

They all keep diaries-stationers.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

ment-
THE UNDOMA COMPANY. Omaha
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27
ALL DONE OUT.


Veteran Joshua Heller, Of 7O6 South
Walnut street, Urbana, III, says: IN
the fan OF 1893. after taking Deans
Kidney Pills 1 told
the readers Of this
paper that they had "
relieved me OF kid IN
ney trouble, dis N
posed OF a lame ~ -
back with pain " m
ACROSS my loins and
beneath the shoul- n ~
der blades. During ~
the interval which I A/
has elapsed I have I~
had occasion TO re S
sort to Doan's Kid
ney Pills when /
noticed warnings
o. an attack. On each and every oc-
easiOn the results obtained were Just
as satisfactory as when the pills were
first brought to my notice. I just as
emphatically endorse the preparation
to-day as did over two years ago"
Foster RiIburn Co, Buffalo, n. Y,
prOprietOrs- Fer sale by all druggists
price so cents per box.
When a high salaried officer finds it
necessary to seek the man you may
expect to see thieves trying to break
into Jail.
A bachelor physician says the mi
crObeS in kisses are often fatal-at
lcast they often develop matrimonial
germs.
If church pews were like sleeping
car berths more men would go.
A woman can't get awful fat without
The Hottest impulse most men have
realizing that a mans knees were not
built to be a coal wagon scales.
There are still many opportunities
FOR young men; the trusts haven't been
able to grab all Of them
Anyway, one-half Of the world
knows that the other half is looking
for the best Of it
After a girl has refused him twelve
times a superstitiOus youth viii quit
proposing
Some successful men are 50 per cent
backbone and some others % per cent
cheek.
Statesmen who also ran are natur-
ally slow to predict a bright future for
their country
Weak solutions may be all right in
chemistry, but they don't 90 in pOh-
tics.
A mans SeIf-respecu is often pune
tured by the suspicious OF his neigh
bOrs.
Youth is. going to tackle the things
tomorrow that age finished yesterday.
Most Of Us expect letter obituary
notices than are coming to Us.
A genius is a poor man who can
manage to live without working
It's the woman who doesn't show heI
age who hesitates to tell it
They all keep diaries-Stationers.
If ignorance is bliss, the fellow who
knows il all must be q fool.
Keep your temper If it is good, and
don't lose it If it is bad.
Money talks, but the phonograpf
also speaks for itself
No. CordeIia, the little dears are MOI
seen at stag parties.
It's hard TO be "a good fellow" and
a model husband too.
The man who was born great may
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-01-27

about which would Ike
speak wider
advice is
helpful
e
UUUUU
Arizona republican., 1905-12-22

As in all lines of meats HurIey's lead in prices. Christmas turkey only 1Sc per pound.
Arizona republican., 1905-12-22
JURYMAN HAD BEEN
 THERE.

For nearly six hours had the court been convulsed with the evidence giv- en in a sensational action for breach of promise. The many ridiculous love letters had been read, commented upon and heartily laughed at Counsel had spoken, the judge had summed up and the jury had retired to consider their verdict.
 Well, gentlemen" said the foreman. "how much shall we give this young man?"
 Look nere," said one of the jury men, If I understand alright, the plaintiff doesn't ask damages for blighted affections, or anything of that sort, but only wants to get back what he's spent on presents holiday trips. etc"
 That is so," agreed the foreman.
 Well, then, I vote we don't give him a penny" said the other hastily. "If all the fun ne had with that girl didn't cover the amount he expended it must have been his own fault Gentle men, I courted that girl once myself" , Verdict for the defendant.-The Green Bag.