Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1905-01-12
The Armor Plate Ring.

tnem are threatening TO tell the secrets
Of armor plate contracts in the halcyOn
past, when by conspiracy they forced
Uncle Sam to pay $451 per ton for
plate when John w. Gates was offering
to take the contract at $240 per ton.
He avowed that he could make profit
even at that price but he did not
stand in with the ring, and the ring
had pull enough to have their bids ac-
cepted at the higher figure. What
Uncle Sam ought to do is to build him
an armor plate factory of his own. 1t
would be money in his pocket even if
he never actually made pound of it.
He could thereby force the others to
reasonable prices.
The Cotton Slump.
Suppose a case. Suppose Judge Par
ker had been elected that the great
slump of the last few weeks in cotton
had struck the south, what would have
happened? Why, just as certain as two
and two make four all the stand patters
would have sworn by the great horn
spoon that wicked free traders caused
it. They have not cheek enough to SO
charge now. for Roosevelt was elected
by an overwhelming majority, but the
slump came nevertheless But wait
awhile and see what will happen when
the next campaign is on and public
memory has been dulled somewhat by
the lapse of time. The stand patters
will swear there was no slump in cot
ton. and if there was one it was pro-
duced by free trade agitation.
A witty but cynical woman once de-
clared that the easiest and shortest
route to mans heart is through his
stomach Representative Timothy ID.
Sullivan of New York, whose popular
sobriquet is DRY Dollar Tim evil
IDENTITY believes in that womans theory,
though he may never have heard or
read her mot. On Christmas day he
fed 1900 of his faithful constituents
and speeded the departing guests by pre-
senting each of them with a brierwood
pipe and quantum suficit of good
smoking tobacco. Each visitor was
allowed twenty-five minutes in which
to appease his hunger and to quench
his thirst. As this is about twice as
much time as is permitted to a hurry
ing and thirsty traveller. in which to
dine at the average railroad eating
away empty He will certainly sit in
the Sixtieth congress if he lives.
Colonel James Hamilton Lewis, late
ly of the state of Washington, now of
Chicago, could not be duh if he tried
to be, but nevertheless he is likely to
get himself into a class with Grover
Cleveland if he does not look little
out G. C's stronghold is in phrase
making When J. III. L. characterized
recent Democrat platforms as ''socio-
logical symposiums" he must have
caused G. c. to turn green with envy.
AS a linguistic achievement that is al
most equal to .'innocuous desuetudev
and much more original than public
Office is a public trust"
Most assnredly politics makes strange
bedfellows President Roosevelt has
just appointed to a good fat Office in
Virginia J. E. B. Stuart H. on the rec
ommendation of Captain John S. Wise,
once of the Old Dominion. now of New
York J. E. b. Stuart l. was General
Lees famous cavalry commander, who
was killed at the battle of the Yellow
Tavern. and Captain John S. Wise is
the son of Governor Henry A. Wise,
who hung John Brown. Verify, the
world moves, but whittier?
The project of Representatives
Brownlow of Tennessee, Edwards Of
Kentucky and Slemp of Virginia to
make a new state of east Tennessee,
southeastern Kentucky and southwest
eTn Virginia may please them very
well. but it will displease everybody
else in the three states Should they
live till that comes to pass Methuselah
will appear young beside them. Guess
it is one of Brownlow's jokes.
The Democrats of the house did the
very remarkable thing of writing
Joint letter to President Roosevelt rec
ommending a Republican fellow mem
Der, Major yespasian Warner of IIli-
nois, for pension commissioner. which
goes to show that much good will pre-
walls under the dome
Good old Massachusetts is divided
against herself touching device for
her great seal. Some Bay Staters want
the Indian continued thereon. Others
insist that he shall be displaced by
picture of the Mayfiower. If they want
something modern and strictly up to
date, why not use the effigy of Govern
or William Lewis Douglas? His is the
best known face of any Massachusetts
man of this generation. He certainly
would be good substitute for poor Lo.