The Evening statesman. [volume] (Walla Walla, Wash.) 1903-1910, 1905-07-28

| He strikes me as being a very pleas
ant old fellow
WHO said he wasn't?' said the
Tom Tom.
| why aren't you his worst enemy?"
demanded Jimmieboy.
| 'Of course not" said the Tom-Tom
with laugh. I'm the best friend
that he's got. 1 don't want to smash
him. All want is to control MIN.
Why, my dear boy, the Amalgamated
Copper was my baby. 1 brought him
up. When he had the collie, who filled
him full of ginger? Me- When he got
the measles, who pursued every measle
to it's grave? Me. When ne had the
whooping cough, who did the whooping
and the coughing? Me and my friends,
that's who.
Then what on earth is. the trouble
between your asked Jimmieboy. He
| thinks you want to puncture him."
mo, son, that isn't it at all" said
the Tom-Tom. "All want to do is to
get control of my lost baby again. I've
| wept and worked over him many a
sleepless night, and done pretty much
all that father, mother, nurse. COM
panion or friend could do for him, but
ne got into bad company All I want
to do is to rescue him from the
heather, have him treated for dropsy,
from which he is suffering, and put
him on his legs again.
well, how strange it is that he
| should be so afraid of you," said jim
mieboy Why don't you let him know
what you really want him to do?"
Let lin know" roared the Tom
Tom. Haven't 1 placarded my inten-
tiol in every newspaper on two con-
ii. ents? Haven't l stated in 9,753,423
words in ninety-seven monthly issues
of Mr.. Everybody's magazine that if
he will only return at once all will be
forgiven? I've published personals on
all the ashbarrels of Christendom beg
ging him to come to his heartbroken
parent, with never a response. The
minute he got in with the Commits
sioners he was a changed Copper"
Its funny he hasn't seen them,''
said Jimmieboy.
"Oh, no. sighed the Tom-Tom. "Af-
ter all, he's nothing but CIPHER, and
mighty few policemen see anything
| these days. I wrote poem about the
Blind Copper once. Like to hear it?
Well, it runs this way
! pointed out sunset fine
To the policeman on my beat,
And he, upon this heart of mine,
He could not sect.
| I asked him then if he could see
The highway meath his feet
And, on tn immortal soul of me,
He could not sect.
ventured then joke from Punch
To in his ear repeat,
And, though he tried till after lunch,
He could not sect.
I handed him five dollars then
To cover my retreat,
For l had sandbagged two rich men
| He could not sect.
Because, with hand behind his back,
The bill he deftly caught.
And though my crime was deep and
black,
He could not sect.
And so it is that when you need
A copper in a fight,
In life, as in the tales you read,
They're out of sight.
They are agents of justice, the po-
lice are, my little man, and, like JUS
tice, they are blind-most of 'em. So
it amt so queer after all that poor old
Amalgamated can't see and that when
ever I come within hearing distance
he runs like mad" continued the Tom
Tom.
Il wouldn't bother about him if
were you," said Jimmieboy.
ooh, but I can't help myself" said
the Tom-Tom. IF it wasn't for my
pursuit of the Amalgamated Copper
I'd drop out of sight myself, and just
| think what a loss that would be to
everybody! Now that I have become
the literary centre Of Boston and nave
| restored to that noble city of culture
the laurels which it lost in the passing
away of Emerson, Holmes, Lowell
Longfellow and all those other great
predecessors of mine, 1 owe it to the
city of my BIRTH
Were you born in Boston, sir?''
asked Jimmieboy.
Il said b-e-r-t-n," said the Tom
Tom. Il owe it to the city of my
berth to remain actively in the word
business as long as live for her sake.
l stand ready to shed my last drop of
lingo that she may remain pre-emi-
nent in letters, to pour out every
globule of ink in my veins for the en-
| nancement of her fame-aye, to sac
rifice even my vocabulary itself to her
glory and honor. Therefore must
remain in sight and bravely face the
sings and arrows of outrageous for
tunes. But tell me, sonny, where are
you going from here?
Il don't know said Jimmieboy
! Fact is, 1 got into Trustland before I
knew it, and I haven't any special
programme to follow. All I want to
do now is to get out of Pigsburg.'
Are you in it very deep?' asked the
| Tom-Tom.
All the way" said Jimmieboy, not
quite understanding the Tom-Tom's
precise meaning.
We'll, then, there are two things
you can do. Join me in my expedition
or wait until the bottom drops out of
Pigsburg and go along with it, said
the TOm-TOm