davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

New York is impressed with the hor-
or Of the latest tenement FIRE. in
which a score Of lives we're lost How
many times II would have to be null
tipIied to equal the horror Of the bat
tie Of Mukden, which is actually too
great for the world to realize
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

When man has finally brought the
Elements under his sway the Ohio
river will have been about the last 70
succumb.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

wei" moralized lEr NevszEo, We
are here today ana game Tomorrow -
re- sid Kiss Hoshot, glsncing
e the clock; I've noticed that about
you"
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

We repUg to report that the esteem
ed Philadelphia Public Ledger starts
OF an able editorial By saying The
imagination relucts."
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

The whole Venezuelan army is re-
ported to be in constant movement
He must have a nervous temperament.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Some men spend lot OF time won.
deTiHE Why other men work.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Civilized humanity is coming rapid
~ to the conviction that Gen. Sher
man understated the case.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Nearly $4,000, 900 a year is said to
be spent on golf. This can hardly in
ClUde the amount spent on those cute
little golf stockings, however.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Hotel CIerk-We have only one
room left, sir, and the bed is only big
enough for one
Guest-WeI, I sUbbOse we'll hat to
dake is. But 1 hate to hat my wife
slCeb on der floor.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

The statement is made that Russell
Sage is recovering from a bad cold
as if there ever was a good one.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

There are but few sensible people in
the WOrld-yet they All agree with
you.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Wise IS the girl who can tell wher
a man is making his final proposal
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Have you had any nice, new dishes
since you got that expensive cOOk?"
Yes, ten or a dozen. She smashes
Just as many as the old one did"
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

A Pair Of Birds-'Isn't the doctor's
wife beautiful She has a neck like
that OF a swan" Outlet so. And the
dsctOr has a bill like that Of q peli-
can"
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

II q man gets run over by a street
ear q W0mEn Is never sure that isn't
his way Of trying to hirt with her.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Is II a man knows he is in the wrong
he can afford TO get angry.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Janitors Wffe-What did that old
woman on the sixth floor call you up
for?
Janitor-To call me down.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

No woman needs the ballot to en-
force her rights; she can do It With
tsars and q handkerchief.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Marriage usually makes a man out
Of a lOye-sick youth. He stops writ
ing poetry after the knot Is tied.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Jerrold-Well, I'm going to marry
Dolly Frizzle-frazzlei
HObart-Gadi Can't you live with
out herr
JerrOld-Not without being sued FOL
breach OF promise, I'm afraid
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

A girl Is very clever to act as II
she didn't have such things when any
body happens 70 mention leg.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

With singular avoidance Of the
ordinary course Of things the Utica
Observer says concerning charges
against & public man As soon as he
has recovered his health Re should be
made to meet his fate Ordinarily
those who have utterly lost their
health are solemnly warned to meet
their fate
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Too many people are trying to make
honest dollars dishonesty.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

II you are troubled with insomnia
20 to sleep and forget It
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Perhaps that American girl who IS
touring Europe with a pet pig sitting
beside her. in her motor car merely
wants 70 EhcE that she IS not asham-
I'd q tne orlein q her fzLher's wealth.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

ct told Mr.. Pinchem that he hadn't
a friend in the world" said the indig-
nant citizen And what did he say2"
He said he was glad OF it, as a man
without friends is in no danger Of
being asked to lend money"
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

The longer a man studies women
the less he knows about them
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

He-I can never think Of the right
thing to say at the right time.
She-Why don't you try saying the
right thins sometimes even If you get
ia the wrong place?
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Ct think that the government ought
to take charge Of the corporations"
Yes" answered Mr. Dustan StaX.
But that is only a matter of opinion.
Some Of us corporations think We
ought to take charge Of the govern
ment"
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

An OfIiceholder who has q pull
doesn't generate much push.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

A man seldom acts like a fool IN
less he's the real thing
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Advice that comedies with your own
opinion is easily swallowed.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

There is more coal written on tn
bills than is put in the bins.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

There is something very deceptive
about the way a girl can make you
think she is looking the other way
when she almost winks at you.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

You know" said Miss Kreech. after
her solo, Il intend to go abroad to
finish my musical education"
Why not finish it right now" sug-
gested Miss Galley, and save the ex-
pense"
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

A man may be able to read a wO-
man like a book but he cant shu,
her up.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Father-But do you think you can
make my daughter happy?
Suitor-Hsppyl Say you have
seen her when 1 proposed
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Some OF a woman's clothes tell the
truth about her figure. aid some q lot
more than the truth
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Probably more men would become
famous If they didn't attempt to write
poetry.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

You must never borrow trouble. -
said the ready-made philosopher. /
didn't answered the proprietor OF 4
new automobile. Il bought mine out
right"
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

you don't take any pains with your
writing
The deuce I don't! Why, nan, I've
got writer's cramp"
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21
THE sTRAIN q WoRFE.

5est Of Backs Give Out Under the
Burden Of Daily Tell.
Lieutenant George G. Warren, O.
No. Chemical, Washington, D. c.,
says: It's an honest fact that DOan's
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Some men are mean enough to van:
20 deprive women OF the Joy Of theiI
sorrows
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

It's queer that men object 70 swear
ing OF drinking when there So -
much Fun swearing On sEain-
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Mrs. Knicker-'DOes your GyCk
know her place." Mrs. BOckss--
That's just the trouble; she knsSG
any number Of them"
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Mother-"HOw dare you tell me you
washed your face2 Why, it's just as
dirty as ever TOmmy-''WeIl, I
washed =, but maybe it didn't take.
You know my vaccination didn't the
first time"
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

During the months Of March and April. there
sEill be excursions on the various lines Of rail-
way 20 the Canadian West
Hundreds Of thousands Of acres Of the best
wheat and Grazing Lands On the COntt1e1s
free 70 the settler
Adjoining lands may Be purchased from raj
way and land companies a. reasonable prices
For information IS % route, cost Of transpor-
tzffou efe- auulv 70 Guuerfntendeuf Of Tusrus-
ration. Ottawa Canada. or 90 authorized Ca
1dfsn Government Ageut-W. Y. Bennett. 81
New Yerk Life Building, Omaha Nebraska
Government Agent s. CTaEfoEd5 No.
rs ". Ninth Street. Kansas City. No
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

She-I have been suffering dreadful
" lately with shooting pains in my
face.
He-You may have been using too
much powder.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Church, hate to see a man bow
ing and scraping, dOn's your" Gotham
well, no; not If he's doing il when
the ice from his sidewalk"
you washed your fao5vHSheheU gOfc
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-04-21

Jim JohnsOn-"Am you're horse
afraid OBJ automobile? Joe Jackson
-"Yais" Jim JOhnsOn-"Ah thought
he was blind and deaf?'' Joe Jackson
He am-but he kin smell
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31
Bows Cnntnrc an Engle.

Ted Knowles and another young
boy yesterday captured in trap on
Orchard Mesa a magnificent Golden
eagle. The boys We're unable to take
the big bird home alive, as he was
more than they could handle, so they
killed him by choking him to death.
The eagle made hard fight for his
life.
The boys brought their eagle to
town today and it has attracted much
attention. This monarch of the air
measures seven feet from wing tip to
wing tip. The feathers are long.
glossy and very beautiful. The great
talons look most formidable. The
big bird is certainly a perfect speci-
men of the eagle family.
The boys who made the capture
are little fellows, both under fifteen
years of age, and of course they are
very proud of their adventure.
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31
At LendyiIIc Inst Night.

Leadville Herald-Democrat: A
fashionable and critical audience wit
nesse the production of Don Caesar
de Bazan" at the Elks' opera house
last night. Mr.. Charles B. Hanford
and his leading lady. Miss Marie
Drofnah. had the support of a most
capable company and the acting
throughout was heartily applauded.
The play has been presented to the
American public for years and the
title role has been assumed by dis
tinguished actors including such as
Alexander Salvini. Jr.. whose super
ior as a romantic actor has never
been seen in America and rarely
equalled, but were he alive today he
would gladly admit the power of
Hanford.
The play has literary qualities
which will entitle it to live as long
as there is a stage for it to be pre-
sented upon and as long as there
are people to see it. The story is
founded on incidents in which ro-
nance is blended with history in
Spanish court life and was written
by two eminent Partisan playwrights.
It was translated by two famous Lon
don literary men, and from the var
ious versions made from the French,
this is said to be the best.
Miss Marie Drofnah, who took the
part of Mariana, is a woman of Won
derful versatility and ability.
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31

Secretary Taft has taken up the
matter of the admission of the Phil
ippine sugar, and appeared before
the regular committee and plead
with it TO recommend that sugar
from the islands be admitted with
la reduced tariff Judge Taft has been
poking his nose into promiscous af-
fairs lately and the least of them is
not the natter of tariI reduction on
Philippine sugar. We would like TO
know how much Secretary Taft does
not know about the situation in this
country, anyhow. We realize that
lawyers are charged with a devil of
a sight more knowledge than they
usually possess, but it would seem
in matter of business like the pres
ent he would not butt in. as he seems
to want to do on almost every ques-
tiou before the people. We don't
want any reduction on sugar coming
from the Philippines, whether it is
democratic. republican or any other
policy We want to save the great
new industry of the west
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31

house Mrs. Sangster shows an inti-
macy with general conditions which
seems to fit the case Of almost ev-
cry husband. who has to take a run
with his cigar on the approach of
the good wife of the house. Mrs.
sangster says that den should be
provided for every man. who wants
it, and who win stay at home 10
enjoy it, In that den there should
be no plaoards of restrictions.
a cigar or pipe and whatever else
the man of the house would have,
'let him have it," says Mrs. Sang
ster. Furthermore. she says that if
there can be no den provided, per
nit the man TO smoke in his sit
ting room or library, and if folks
are too delicate to stand the smoke.
let them call at a more seasonable
period to their olfactories.
This may not be the exact Ian
guage of Mrs. Sangster. but it is
what she intended to express. This
plea win go great way for the
emancipation of the man in his own
house. coming from such an eminent
source as Mrs. Sangster, and also
from source which it was not be-
Heved would tolerate smoke at all.
There is still hope for the hen
pecked husband. who has to remove
his shoes when he enters the stiff and
unrighteous parlor.
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31

The position of that congressman
who attempted to secure the passage
of resolution in the house of rep
resentatives condemuing the massa-
ere OF the Russian worlJmeu bent
upon peaceful mission. was alb
solutely correct. If we cannot con
denim the sacrifice Of innocent blood.
shed in the cause of liberty. what of
our boasted freedom of speech. But
that congressman. instead of having
his proposed resolution passed with
eclat was told that it would be a
breach of international courtesy to
express sympathy for the men shot
down by the czar's soldiers. Evil
IDENTIFY we are becoming a nation of
lying diplomats, for that is what dip
lomacy means Never was more
peaceful undertaking attempted than
the advance to the cars palace by
the worlngmen of ST. Petersburg.
To have them shot down like rapid
dogs is an insult to us, to liberty and
to the world and its civilization.
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31

corruption and disorder in other
parts OF the city administration, the
building of the storm sewer has Civ
en- Pueblo a public work unequalled
in its excellence and durability It
will only be few more years un-
til the time viii have arrived that
Grand Junction must have such a
sewer. The sanitary sewage system
is already Inadequate, and when the
time arrives for the construction of
the storm sewer the whole matter
OF sewers should be overhauled
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31

The darkey was wont to say
'Nlassa don't worry bout de we'd
der. because YOU can't better it
The advice was wholesome and very
truthful Il could be used to great
advantage here at the present time
by those who must growl at the wea-
ther for want of better subject
upon which to vent their darl, ma
lures
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31

That writing expert, HANNA, the
chief witness before the contest COM
mittee, must be almost omnipotent
in his ability What HANNA does
not know upon the matter of writ
ing is certainly not recorded in the
hoolAs
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31

Edward Markham's new poem
in our judgment one of the greatest
poems that he has written. Plea
TO the Car" is n modern poetic
epic. 1t should be read by every
one who believes in poetic expires
sion, as it certainly says much in its
rythm that should appeal to the pub
lie. The Sentinel publishes it to
day that all its readers may know
of it's beauty
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31

Dynastic Europe seems to have
no fellow feeling FOR the ear and
his troubles. Even the war lord,
william, is silent upon the great CON
test in the cars domain.
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31
Prof. Cole Isntertnins.

Prof. and Mrs. E. E. Cole enter
tanned the editorial stan OF the High
School Record at their handsome
home on White avenue last evening.
The hours were most delightfully."- en-
joyed by the young ladies and gen
tlemen. There were many happy
features, including a charming lunch
con.
The guests numbered more than a
dozen. and the hour was late when
the evenings pleasures ceased.
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31

Thus far no person has signifed
their intention of seeking the nomi-
nation for mayor on either Of the
tickets of the two dominant politi-
cal parties. Mayor sampliner states
that he is out of politics and under
no circumstances would he accept a
nomination at the hands of the par
ty which has honored him twice by
the nomination.
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31

It is said that Ted Primrose will
be a candidate before the republican
convention for the nomination for
the office of city clerk. Mr.. Prim-
rose is well known in the city and
has lately been assisting at the office
of the county clerk and recorder
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31

A uonogenarian. to undertake a
trip across the continent without
money and without friends along the
line of his travel has greater faith
in humanity than the average indi-
vidual. The y. a. r. veteran who
visited this city yesterday has that
faith and il does not seem misplaced.
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31

All kinds of hauling done at rea-
sonable prices by Barton & Plat,
the liverymen. The finest wagon in
the city for hauling pianos and ex-
ira heavy goods. Calls always an
swered promptly.
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31

The Charles b Hanford company
arrived in the city at noon from
Leadville, where Don Caesar de Ba-
zan" was presented TO large audi
ence last night. Mr.. Hanford and
Miss Drofnah are stopping at the
Grand hotel
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31

Pueblo has just completed a storm
sewer Of which it is said the peo-
pie are proud. In speaking of the
past years administration of munio-
ipal affairs in that city. the Chieftain
states that. while there has been
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31

The Romanons have not forgot
ten the cruelty of Catherine or OF
Ivan the Terrible.
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31

Mrs. sangster has taken up the
cudgeis in behalf of the downtrod-
den man-in his own household. And
in her defense of the man OF the
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31

Senator Horace T. DeLong will re
turn home shortly to spend few
days with his family.
The daily sentinel., 1905-01-31

No. was twenty minutes late to-
day.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-09-22
FITzSIMMONS TRIAL CALLED
Seven Jurors Secured in Case Against
President of Cumulative
Credit Company

Orlando K. Fitzsimmons, president of
the Cumulative Credit company of 125
South Broadway, will be tried in the
United States court on the charge of
using the United States mails to furth-
er lottery scheme as soon as jury
can be impanelled. Seven jurors were
secured yesterday, but not until new
venire was called.
There are six counts in the indict-
pent returned by the United States
grand jury last November. All refer
to letters and postal cards sent through
the mails.
The scheme called for the payment of
81 a week for fifty-two weeks and at
the end of that time $1OO would be paid
the subscriber. If the subscriber wished
to continue he could do so by pay
ment of fifty cents a week for 100
weeks and at the end of that time 5000
would be paid him, if there was suf-
ficient sum in the treasury.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-09-22
MORMON PRESIDENT ARRIVES
Returns From chihuahua and Reports
1000 Converts There and In
Sonora, Mexico

]. F. Smith. president of the Mormon
church, and a party which included
his wife and son, were registered at the
Lankershim yesterday. Mr.. Smith has
just returned from dedicating a Nor
mon school in Juarez, province of Chi
huahua, Mexico. He said last night:
IT have just dedicated the largest and
most beautiful Mormon school building
in the United States. Although we have
schools in Dublan and Diaz, in this
same province, they are neither SO
large nor so costly, the school in
Juarez having cost in the neighborhood
of $40, 900.
We have in the provinces of Chihua-
hua and Sonora over 1000 converts to
the Mormon religion.
Mr.. Smith and party leave today for
Salt Lake City, which marks the end
of their journey.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-09-22
"FoRGOTTEN ARMY" HEARS
Russian Troops in Korea Get Vague
Rumors of Armistice but
No Details
BY Associated Press.

BY Associated Press.
ONGA, North Korea, near Gaskewich
bay, with the Russian Korean army.
Wednesday, Sept. 2O.-We hear that an
armistice has been arranged in Man
churia, but nothing definite is known
here. This army, with good reason, is
called the forgotten army" Letters
come seldom and no supplies are arriv-
ing, there being no roads. We live on
the country, using the property of the
inhabitants. There are no war corre-
spondents here. Heavy rains have re-
suited in much sickness, but there are
no medicines no hospitals and no Red
Cross. 1t is reported that this army
will be withdrawn from the Tumen dis
trict, which is in the neutral zone.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-09-22
Life Saved by Swamp-ROOt
The Wonderful Kidney. Liver and
Bladder Remedy
SAMPLE BOTTLE SENT FREE BY MAIL

Swamp-Root, discovered by the eminent
kidney and bladder specialist, promptly
cures kidney, liver, bladder and uric
acid troubles.
Some of the early Symphonic of weak
kidneys are pain or dull ache in the back
rheumatism, dizziness, headache, ner-
vousness, catarrh of the bladder gravel
or calculi. bloatlng, sallow complexion
puffy or dark circles under the eyes, sup
preston of urine. or compelled to pass
water often day and night.
The mild and extraordinary effect of
the world-famous kidney remedy, Or.
Kilmer's Swamp-Root. is soon realized.
1t stands the highest for its wonderful
cures of the most distressing cases. If
you need a medicine you should have
the best.
Swamp-Roo is not recommended for
everything, but if you have kidney liver,
bladder or uric acid trouble you will find
1t just the remedy you need.
Sold by druggists in fifty-cent and one
dollar sizes. You may have sample
bottle of DIR. Kilmers Swamp-Root and
a pamphlet that tells all about 1t. in
cluding many of the thousands of letters
received from sufferers cured, both sent
free by mail. Write DR.. Kilmer & Co.,
Binghamton, N. Y, and please be sure
to mention that you read this generous
offer in the Los Angeles Daily Herald.
Don't make any mistake, but remember
the name, Swamp-Root DR.. Kilmer's
Swamp-Root, and the address, Bingham
ton, n. Y, on every bottle.