davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Grit-advocate., 1905-04-07
MONKEYS AS GAY v.aes
Observation Proves They Have a
Sense Of Eunor

Recently monkey got the better o.
the COMMON enemy. the carr!on crow.
By teigning illness. Re was fastened
70 bamboo pole With a running ring
When he Vas on his perch the crows
annoyed him by stealing from his por-
ringer on the ground
One morning they had been special
IL disagreeabIe- He closed his ewes
and feigned a bad illness. When his
days food was brought the crows de-
scended upon it. and he had scarcely
strength 10 defend IT,
By good acting he managed 10 CAP
rure one Of the crows To pluck i,
alive was the obvious course. Then.
instead of pulling it 10 pieces, like the
king monkey whom kipling and Sir
Edward Buck watched enjoying a sim
lar triumph in simIa, this monkey
tossed the crow into the air. where
It's own companions fell upon it and
killed il
Monkeys certainly have a sense o.
fun. Darwin used to spend hours
watching young female orang-outang
in the geological gardens, and was
sure that she had the comic sentiment.
She delighted TO put on her head
Ike a cap. peculiar shaped bowl
which had a droll effect, and she was
sensitive TO the effect which her joke
produced upon the spectators.-Lahore
Tribune.
The Grit-advocate., 1905-04-07
Enthusiasm Holds Off AGE

When you begin to think that "
isn't worth while TO dress for the
chance man caller and to prefer send.
ing down word you arn't at home 70
mussing your best frock; when the n.
vitation TO a party suggests nothing
more to you than the next mornl-
headache which may follow it; when
you feel out of place in a frilly hat and
begin not to care whether your belt
fits or not; when child around tie
house gets on your nerves and ycu
find yourself doubling the com7Ii.
ments your husband gives you; when
love poems and love stories awaken
only your smile of amusement. when
you consider any sort Of beautifyiHg
process, from curling your hair to pull.
ing in your stays. too much trouble;
dining room table. instead of pnnirF
them in your hair; when you com.
mence wearing comfortable shoes and
letting ont your corset strings merely
because they hurt you-then you are
really growing old and there is no
help for you.
AS long as woman retains her
vanity and her enthusiasm she mas
still got firm hold on her youth. and
not all the false teeth and gray hairs
in the universe can wrench il from
her"
The Grit-advocate., 1905-04-07

let him give her dash of rum. Yet
another strobe across the room. a
most inane expression on his face: to
him had fallen the honor Of removing
her headgear.
bevy of insolent youths with their
bowing and scraping,
Twice | made the movement to en-
ter, and twice | hesitated. My dila-
toriness was my undoing, for as I
was slipping backward, intending to
leave and choose more apropos time
for addressing Mistress Allyn, my
sword clanked against the wainscot-
ing, and gave out metallic sound,
The simpering fellows looked
around with a suspicious quickness.
Had the lady seen me following her
coach? | was certainly admitted as
If expected. | recognized the one at
her feet as my foe of the Lodge. Sir
| Raoul Dwight From a darkening of
his countenance, hardly preceptible.
| felt that the recognition was mutual.
and that that recognition brought
Sladncss to more than one.
TiiSHL Was out OF the question,
Nausht remained to me but to ad.
vance with as good grace as could
into the room, where I was waited for.
Mistress Rosemary Allyn's eyes met
and crossed mine when had straight.
ened myself from my lowest bow.
A rippllng laugh escaped her.
Sdeath." she explained. Whom
have we here, cousin? One of your
fricnds?" she queried of the one still
at her feet.
None of mine, sv aet co.," he said
The quick reply came with an insult.
ing look at me.
His task was now finished. and as.
sure you my advent into the room
had not FASTENED it. He stood up
tall and straight and insolent He
strutted toward me with his eyeglass
on and looked me up and down The
fellow smclt SO of bergamot, l vow
twas offensive.
| returned his look quite as fxedly
for brief second, when l turned tC
something more to my taste.
The Grit-advocate., 1905-04-07
Weighty Bishop.

Bishop Peck of the Methodist
church was large man, weighing
over $50 pounds. While on tour and
stopping at the residence OF a presid.
ing elder, the good bishop turned over
in his bed, and the furniture collapsed,
dropping him to the floor with tre-
mendous thud.
The presiding elder rushed upstairs,
calling: What is the matter, bishop?
Is there anything | can do for you?"
Nothing is the matter" answered
the bishop; but if | don't answer the
call for breakfast tell your wife to look
for me in the cellar"
The Grit-advocate., 1905-04-07

Il know I'm getting old" said thS
little woman with the sunny smile ard
the gray streaks on her temples, but
just love TO go TO dances as much
as ever, and, when I'm there l don;
feel old bit. wish | could realize
my age. but I'm longing this moment
for a baby hat of all-over embroiders
and bolero suit, Isn't it shocking
You ought to take yourself by the
hand and shake it, replied the wom
an with the blonde hair and the dul!
eyes. You are not getting old. and
you never will. I'm older than you
are this minute"
But interrupted the bright-eyed
woman. Il was grown g.rl goirs
to dances when you were wearing
pinafores and eating pickles. And
just look at my snow-white hairs. Be
sides, my dear although you don; /;
know it. I've lost two teeth on both
sides and have to .,ear a plate Now
isn't that proof enough OF old age"
1T is no proof at all replied thc
other stanchly. "A woman is ne~cr
really old until she loses her interest
in pretty clothes and would rather
stay at home than go out in the even
ings. II is not the loss OF your teeth
but the loss of your enthusiasm that
is the signpost of old age.
The Grit-advocate., 1905-04-07

came the spendthrift of my own
genius, and to waste an eternal youth
gave me curious joy. Tired of being
on the heights. | deliberately went to
the depths in the search for new SEN
sation. What the paradox was to me
in the sphere of thought. perversity
became to me in the sphere of pas
sion. Desire. at the end was a NAL,
ady or a madness. or both. grew
careless of the lives of others. | took
pleasure where it pleased me and
passed on. | forgot that every little
action OF the common day makes or
nnmakes character. and that there
fore what one has done in the secret
chamber one has some day to cry
aloud on the housetop. ceased to be
lord over myself I was no longer the
captain of my soul. and did not know
II. allowed pleasure to dominate me.
| ended in horrible disgrace. There is
only one thing for me now, absolute
Extracts from DE Profun-
dis by Oscar Wilde.
The Grit-advocate., 1905-04-07

u glanced up on hearing the snow
break and, acting upon my first tm4
pulse, turned my back to the ava
lanche. II struck me first on the
legs and | sprang into the air as high
as | could. The mass passed under
me and by the terrific rush of the
snow | was kept on the top all the
way down into the gulch. about 500
feet. l was the only one free and
proceeded to dig the others out. AS
the snow frequently packs after run
ming. almost to the consistency Of
ice. this was no easy matter.
1T happened that the man next to
me was buried in a perpendicular pO-
sition with only his hair visible.
had to free his body down to the
ankles before | could pull him out.
The last man reached was dead when
eXtricated. The rest of us escaped
with slight bruises. 1t was the next
July before articles we lost were
found"
The Grit-advocate., 1905-04-07
Development of Liquid Air

A liquid air demonstration is a short
visit into the fairyland of science. To
see a rubber ball dipped into it and
thrown to the floor only to crash like
glass into small fragments; to see
kettle boiling away upon a cake of
ice; to see mercury frozen solid and
used as a hammer; to see iron made
brittle and crushed in the hands; to
see steel burning in a small glass, and
at the same time grapes freezing at
temperature OF 312 degrees below
zero in the same glass; these sights
and many others are indeed almost
too marvellous for belief.
Liquid airs ultimate development
may not be safely predicted. 1t is in
its infancy-where steam was at the
beginning and electricity at the middle
of the last century. What is known
The Grit-advocate., 1905-04-07

about 1t is that it is here and can be
procured IN large quantities at low
cost The first that was liquefed was
about half wine glass full in amount
and cost at the rate of $4,000 a gal
lon. Now the same amount costs a
le" cents. Automobiles have been
propelled by it; physicians have used
1t with good results in cancer cases
and as local anaesthetic in surgical
operations. 1t may solve the garbage
problem, as it causes tin cans, hair
and other refuse to burn briskly and
completely. with no smoke or odor 1t
Is one of the most powerful of eX-
ploslves, and when it shall be thor
ouShly understood it may become one
OF the greatest factors in the indus-I
trlai advancement of the WORTHLESS
lies Weekly.
The Grit-advocate., 1905-04-07

How portray those rluIaut gTlneS.
How c@pic1 trat glfllsn air.
- tn rose r-T f'"H"T-!Ihe face $,
EiUsrins with - b@auty rare2
How describe tnus+-. oval features.
Fashioned IL Cna=t= GregIau mold,
Fearless a. shy forest creatures
Wandering through dim lea:y wolde
Dark those eyss-rhe Muse conf-sses-
A dim GI-kg- ysIuuIOJs gloom.
Soft a. SIX those tangled tre~--s-
Frausht with fragrance and perfume
CEerrr IIss that curve capFicluls.
Pruiine a. in dainty srUTr.
NILE white teeth that gisam delicious
With the fragrance Of the morn
Here's z pIquau., persive maiden,
Ora gluEs a. soft summer night.
Wien tls bF-+Z.s with hal-an laden
Sways the Iil!Ews in its flight
snap.lE as nTru Cr@claH shepherd
fpslre in untUrOr.d eaSs.
supple a some 'awny leopard
FrOl!cklng amid the trees.
How describe that liquid laughter.
GUrgilDg like mountain riIl.
Soaring ringing L-ath the raft@--
SangE!ne, splendid. never stIll?
How portray that regal bearing.
stately as SOM gracious queen.
Or some sUmptuoUs duchess. wearing
Jewels soft. superb, serene?
The Grit-advocate., 1905-04-07

cracking OF a whip. 1t heralded the
approach of one of the fine coaches
of the town We stepped hastily back
against house, for usually they came
at SO great a speed the mud and DIAL
collected in the cutters were splashed
indiscriminately about and in this
case it might be to the hurtfulness OF
our attire. We were both dressed
faultlessly, and out for an airing.
The coach swayed and whirried
along the unpaved and rutty street.
while the footmcn had all they could
do to keep their seats. 1t slowed up
when opposite us. We both looked
indiferently at the gold and buff
e1uiDage In the coach sat the woman
| loved-Mistress Rosemary Allyn!
| met full gaZe-she looked at me
for quite second, with the lowering
coauetry of great beauty, sure of
her conquest-and then she dropped
her lids in languid haughtiness. There
was no recognition in her glance; no
return to my gracious salutation. The
carriage rolled past.
"Slife! Who is the beauty?" ex-
claimed Mister Arnold. You seem
to know her"
What ! answered him I know not.
How | excused myself as hastily left
him, | know not also. The insinuat-
ing smile l caught upon his clean
shavcn lips recalled to my mind that
he was not one to stop at any scruples
he ought to have when dressing UP a
story to suit the over-nice palates OF
his score of cronies; fitting it out
with that spiciness of flavor which
delighted those scandal-mongers. |
trusted somewhat in his being my
friend and his good nature. If they
held him not, | was no pulling infant
and could take care OF my own honor.
1t was well for me that the coach
had rot far to go and went the rest
OF the way in a decorous manner,
else I'm afraid my maroon-colored suit
with it's gold lacings would have suf-
frred. For. God. | had a good pair
OF legs and proposed Heeting the
lady.
The Grit-advocate., 1905-04-07
G~A~%h~-~t-~~vt-~s +t'--""%t'"'"'vt'-"'+t"'""1c
I BELLE OF BUBBLY CREEK
e Por,rai, of a Lady-A Memory of Boyhood
{

Soft ard -hy thos- lustr1rs -iarc-s.
Tender a. the dream q. dawn
Flushed with old AID .---ll .-lrla--es
Frank and f-ari--s- IS THO :-Gu.
Iuky black those frIr=irs ia-E-s.
Masking well tie s1efgy Agn'
From the TuguI-r eye That flashes
Pity on some -lckiess N--rL
And her timClCB- tread Is l'eF''-
Than the -hy aud gu.stfI- G-v-,
And hef ivory Ug|~ J. bfis!!'rf
Than the IaHEEn2 Of tbH yea.
And ner yuis. sounds loH and r'ri-l.-c
Softer than some mourning I1F..
Cooling for her mat. and nllla-
The ambient aIl "!LA plants o. love
1.-the as shspe!y fa,gu that passes.
WinAOn.- ~ OgUisn child
Buoraur a. crisp d-ry grasses
When bleak winter is nssuH"d-
And your song 50 clea! ard ringing
Witches al h,u.at your spell.
Like the sDaIluE lark that singing,
ScatteTs music y sT tn. Gei!.
Yes. vUur regal Oeautys splendid
SumptuOUs as a Gewy flower.
Or red rose and lily blended.
Dulvering meath th. tiukling SHOW :
and your lustToUs ryes are tender
Stainless a. some splendid star
Ialtiy homage here l render
Thin echoes trickling from sfar
JAMES +. kINSEi.LA
Registry Division. Chicago Pcstnttlce.
The Grit-advocate., 1905-04-07
His Drink Had Four Thirds.

The negro bootblacks in a Broadway
barber shop were talking about drink.
ing. "Ah like ma red-cye straight.
No miXin' fo' me" said one. The ii.
G: paused a mor.ent in his work. Il b
used to like it that away, too" he said.
but Abs charged ma tastes. Sunday
a man bought me a drink an il wah
a mixed one. 1t wah fine What
Wah it?" asked the other. 1T wah
three thirds whisky an the othah
third hlackbehy Wine" was the reply.
-Kansa7 City Times.
The Grit-advocate., 1905-04-07
LONGEVITY and Strer qth.

There used to live in l. m, Mass,
a well known wit named Da ius Barry.
One day he was in gro, cry store
where they had recently purchased a
rev lot of butter The grocer said
Darius, take home some of that but
ter and see how you like it." Which
he did.
a few days after he was in the
store again, when the grocer said:
Darius, how did you like that but
ter?"
We'll" said Darius, when I'm as
old es that butte hCre | stall be as
strong"
The Grit-advocate., 1905-04-07
q an ouentin Water. a. you, sstv.

ice." said TO the lady; and am cgu.
10 pay my deyolr TO Mistress Eo.&
mary Allyn
The fshmonger Of long EzCt
ne-amo-phOsed into a gallant re
whispered in loud aside.
The fellows roared.
!ooEed steadily at them. Nor.
tina. one pair Of eyes fell to oceupy
themselves with something beside
myself
Yes" retorted. II would !o.-
her followers
Followers" she repeated. "Ah, !
see"
She stood up.
Gentlemen" she cried. "pernt. ne
to introduce cOnfrere-Master Cgea-
tin Waters"
They all bowed with mock humility
before ne.
humorad her. Time enough 10
deal with item, and my face a. he
thought became darker than its own
dark hue. as l returned their tows
sternly.
/ !
apologize for my unceremonious en-
trance into your presence lie. Thy
beauty, which dazzles. plead my e.-
cuse"
"Ah. Cousin Raoul, rival Of thine
in polite batteries" she said. To me,
You are welcome. In a lady's train
Of followers there is, believe, al.
ways room for one more"
In This case. though, Master Cuen-
tin Waters, the card is FULL" sale Sir
Raoul Dwight.
That is for the lady to say" re-
piled. and looked at her.
Before sne could answer the nsar-
est fellow began:
1T seems TO me I like not your
tailor's fit; your coat does not hang
to suit my eye"
Your points are too dazzling
bright; they glitter with an up-coun.
try newness." the next fellow took
up the refrain.
Your lacing goeth crookedly; it
offends my eye" drawled the third.
Why waste breath?" l cried. at is
more than enough"
threw my gauntlet on the floor.
He who had begun the gibbering
stopped to pick it up, but Cousin
Raoul' stopped him.
Nay. George. thou all-round fight.
err" said he, "'tis to me this game be-
longs"
He handed me my glove with the
tip of his sword
Il would have the pleasure, sir?"
said he.
1t is mutual, sir" replied. Time
and place."
Back of Montague house is good
place" he answered "As for the
time-there | must plead for indulg-
ence. In less than an hour I am due
at court. where his Majesty has com
manded that | be in attendance to 20
on a three-days trip up the country
after that am at your service the
evening of the third day, and l do not
think the few days waiting will rem
der our meeting any the less joyful"
art satisfied?" burst In Mictress
Rosemary Allyn, ready to Shift the
blame upon anyone's shoulders but
where it belonged.
"No." | replied; but three days
hence ] shall be- And I smiled at
her.
"A brave man boasts not beforehand
of what he thinks he may accom-
plish," she retorted.
Nay. you misjudge me" | said.
THE satisfaction lieth in the thought
that | may cen oblige Mistress Rose
mary Allyn for once"
you have obliged me before this"
she murmured.
"If | have I knew it not" | inter
rupted
"And she requires naught at your
hands" she finished with a toss OF her
head
ut would not belittle her to do so.
since she accepts the services OF such
as these said. and, confronting the
men, I swept their faces with an In.
solent glance.
4
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1905-04-25
SMITH IS DEAD AND
CLARK HAS FLED.
Negroes Had Argument Over
Woman.
a PISTOL AND RAZOR PULLED
Tragedy Occurs in House of Liz
Luckie. Who Is Only Witness Clark
Put Five Bullets into Smiths Hide
and then Makes His Escape.

Lying dead in the doorway of the
house of Lizzie Luckie, with five pistol
balls pumped through him and gleam-
ing razor near his nerveless hand, the
police found the body Of Nose Smith,
an Albany negro, at late hour Sunday
night when they called there.
The killing occurred at 9 O'Clock, over
near Odd Fellows hall.
Lizzie Luckie, the "bone of conten-
ton" between the sable knights, Jim
CLARK and Moss Smith, was the only
witness to the tragedy. She is IN Jail
here pending further investigation of
the case by the authorities.
Jim CLARK, the man behind the gun,
left for Kamranh Bay to join the Rus
sian squadron.
Lizzie Luckie tells the story of the
tragedy, the only one developed as yet
Clark was in her house when Smith
called. Unexpectedly, Sunday night.
Both men, quite likely, had equal
claims, and Clark being first upon the
scene held his ground. Smith assumed
a warlike mien.
He assured Clark that he would have
to get out, the woman states, and suit
ing action to the word, advanced upon
Clark with baud in pocket It was then
that the gun play began.
Clark pulled his artillery and at once
put 1t in motion.
The first shot struck Smith under the
right arm, the others penetrating his
back, as the negro turned, quite likely
Smith fell dead in the doorway with
five bullets through him. When Sher-
iff Bell and Chief Feagin, with other
arrived they found him lying
there, in pool of his own blood.
Near his hand was a razor Whether
this bit of hardware belonged to Smith,
or was placed there for effect, the Off
GERS do not know as yet.
The verdict of the coroner's jury was
in accordance with this statement, find
ing Jim Clark the slayer,
Clark, it is said, went at once to his
home four miles in the country, stating
to his people there that he had shot
Smith in self-defense. He then left,
and bas not since been seen. Lizzie
Luckie was locked up and will be held
pending full inquiry into the tragedy.
Such Sunday shootfests are of FREE
quent occurrence at this season.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1905-04-25
MOLiERE'S COURAGE.
Pathetic story of the Dramatist's
Last Stage Appearance.

Pathetic story of the Dramatist's
Last Stage Appearance.
There is a pathetic account of Mo-
heres last appearance which shows the
supreme courage which sickness could
not Gissipate and which was a part
OF him till death. His health had long
been falling and he had SUI. cred for
years with Il distressing cough, which
rapidly became worse. On the day of
the third presentation of La Malade
Inaginaire," 1873, he was so ill that
his wife and friends entreated hin not
70 perform. But he was DEAF to tIeir
appeals. what can | dOf" he said
"I:cre are forty Workmen who have
only their daily pay to live upon. and
they VIII lose that if | DO not act |
should reproach myself if | neglected
to give them their bread for Ii sins gle
day" Though more than usually i'll
he went through his part with
great difficulty. Once during the per
Torrance the company could not bat
see that he was cOnvulsed. but LIE PASS
ed it off with a forced laugh. s. hon
it was over he left the stage, Sd ing
to his friends, The cold is killing me"
He was wrapped up warmly. and his
chair man sent to convey him to his
home. No sooner was he i'll bed than
he was seized with a violent fit of
coughing. which brought on a honor
rhage, and he died before his wife
could reach his side. His last words
were to assure his friends that the
hemorrhage was not alarming in amy
way and urging them to take courage
A Generous Offer.
When MiSs Helen Keller was at the
exposition in st. Louis in 1904 she Wis
tied the Japanese tea house and for a
few minutes shook hands with some of
the mattresses, little olive colored wo-
men who spoke almost no English but
expressed their interest and intelli-
gence without words.
Many weeks after Miss Keller had
returned to Boston she heard from an
official Of the exposition that one of
the japanese Mattresses had gone to
a st. Louis physician and asked to
have one of her eyes taken out and Civ
en- to Miss Keller. When she was told
that such a gift was impossible she
Wept in bitter disappointment.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1905-04-25
REACHING THE SPOT.
1t Can BE Done, So Scores of Ameri-
Gus Citizens Say.

To cure an aching back,
The pains of rheumatism,
The tired-out feelings,
You must reach the spot-get at the
cause,
In most cases tbs the kidneys.
Doan's Kidney Pills are for the kidneys
Mitchell Lowe, the we'll known
blacksmith, who lives Gu the outskirts
of the city, says OF Doan's Kindey Pills
"rhey are alright: can see now why
they are willing to give out samples.
You know they do the work and are not
afraid to put them on their merits Ny
back had been hurting me for couple
of years past. / thought I had rheuma-
tism and was rubbing it with liniments
and medicines prescribed by doctors
without benefit until / was utterly dis
heartened. 1t did not make any differ
ence what did I had the same old
pain. Someone spoke TO me about
Doan's Kidney Pills. / had lost faith in
medicines of any kind, but / went to
Dodson's Pharmacy in habitual sort
of way and got box and tried them. /
had not used them three days bofore the
rheumatism left me. kept on taking
them until / had used up two boxes be-
cause [ could not believe / was cured.
have not had the rheumatism or the
backache as you call it since then. They
are certainly the real thing for the
backache"
For sale by all dealers. Price so
cents. Foster Milburn Co, Buffalo,
New York, sole agents for the United
States.
Remember the name Doan's-and take
no other.