Lincoln County leader. [volume] (Toledo, Lincoln County, Or.) 1893-1987, 1905-09-15
CHAPTER XIII.

An0 as Tor ner; Sne was stunned IL
most into unconsciousness by this shock
of self-abasement and distress. She lay
on the sofa, her face covered with her
hands; she could not face the light.
What was she, then ?-she who hitherto
had been so fearless and so proud.
flirt, jilt, o'-love-that was how
she saw herself and then there was
kind Of despair over the misery she had
wrought, and a yearning to have him
back to implore his pity and his forgive
ness; and then sudden resolves to free
herself in another direction, at any cost
of penitence and humiliation. She began
TO compose hurried brief messages, though
the throbbing brain and the shame-strick-
en- soul could scarce decide between the
fitness of them. These were some of
them:
Dear Papa-I have gone away. Tell
Archie not to think any more about me.
"YOLANDE."
And then again:
Dear Archie-I send you back the
engagement ring; l am not worthy to be
your wife. l am sorry If l have caused
you any disappointment, but you have
less to regret than l have"
And then again-to one not named
at all:
To-day l go away. Never think of
me again, or of what has happened. For
give me; that is all"
And then she began to think-if this
wild torture of suggestions could be call
ed thinking-of the undertaking that lay
before her, and the thought of it was
something Of relief There would be
an occupation, urgent, continuous, de-
manding all her attention; in time, and in
measure, she might school herself to
forget. Perhaps, If this duty turned out
to be a very sad and painful one, 1t
might be taken by those whom she had
wronged as a sort of penance. She was
prepared to suffer. She thought she de-
served to suffer. Had she not proved a
traitor 10 the man whom she had prom
ised to marry? Had she not brought
misery to this best and dearest Of all
her friends, to this fine and noble nature
that she had learned to know, and that
by her idleness and carelessness-the
carelessness of a vain coquette, needless
of consequences? What would he think
of her? She could only vaguely recall
the reproaches he had heaped upon him
self; but she knew that he was in dis
tress, and that she was the cause of it
And perhaps If there were trials in
store for her, if there was suffering In
store for her, perhaps he would never
know that she rather welcomed that
! and was content to receive her punish
! ment? Perhaps he would never know
: how grieved she was. 1t was over and
done, and past recall. And she knew
that henceforth her life would be quite
different to her.
| Mr.. Winterbourne and John Short
| lands were on their way back from tn,
| hill.
: II scarcely know what has happened
to-day" Mr.. Winterbourne was saying
"All the time l have been thinking Of
our going back. And | know what
shall find when l go back-the wrecl
of the happiness that have so CAREFUL!
nursed all through these years. 1t is lik,
D., hedging round a garden, and CROWN.
flowers there, and all at once, som.
morning, you find the place trample,
down and a wilderness. hope | am no
unjust, Shortlands but think he nigh
have spared her."
"Who?"
; young Leslie. think he might hav
spared her. 1t was not much. Don
you think-out Of consderation-"
Nonsense, man. What Young Les
lie has done seems to me on reflection
perfectly just, and right, and reasona
4 ble," said John Shortlands, telling a Ii
e in the calmest manner possible. 9Th
: young couple ought not to be hampere,
= in starting life. A little trouble now
what Is that? And it will be better TO
t you too, Winterbourne. You would hav
y kept on worrying yourself. You woul
y have been always apprehensive abou
y something. You would have reproache,
r yourself for not telling him."
a When they reached the lodge, Yoland
e was not, as usual, standing In the pore
o to welcome them homo from the hill.
}. "Please, sir" said the maid, mis-
2 | Winterhourna has n haadacho and an y