davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1905-07-19
Always the Chestnut.

gate.
who are you?" asked st. Peter.
I'm humorist, answered the
party on the outside, land l used to
write jokes for the comic papers.
well, I'll have to investigate
your case" said the keeper of the
keys. "In the meantime go over and
sit down in the shade of that chest
nut tree, and make yourself at
home. Chicago News.
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1905-07-19
bronchitis for Twenty Years.

Mrs. A-inerva Smith, OF DanvlIIe,
ILL.,, writes: II had bronchitis for
twenty years and never got relief un-
til l used Foley's Honey and Tar.
which is a sure cure. North Yakima
Drug Store, A. d. Sloan. Prop'r.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10

A deep dimple shadowed Betty's pink
cheek for n moment. Then, looking de-
murely at Jack, she answered Franks
question.
II would be ever so much obliged to
you If you would just drop me at my
door. Mother scolded because 1 came
out, and it will appease her wrath
somewhat to know that came home
without being touched by the rain"
Jack said nothing, but his face was
very pale when Betty gave him her
hand ut the carriage door. Frank tried
to coax him to change his mind, but
jack was firm, because Betty did not
second the invitation. Just rs the car
riage door was about to be closed Bet
ty leaned out.
ooh, Mr.. Winslow, l have decided TO
go to the Freeman dance Friday night"
Then the carriage rolled away. When
they arrived ut Betty's home neither
Frank Carlyle nor his companion saw
the figure standing in the shadow of a
tree on the opposite side of the street,
and when Frank left Betty Mt the door
and sprang again into his carriage Jack
Winslow walked away with sigh Of
relief.
Anyway" murmured he, "she didn't
ask him to come in."
Friday night and the Freeman ball
came at last. Betty stood before her
mirror looking ut her reflection. The
white null gown, Il gift from her aunt,
who rarely gave her niece anything
worth mentioning, was very becoming
to the girl. She had arranged her hair
after the style Of Mr.. Elfland's famous
picture, and she smiled as she looked
at the change it made in her appear
ancc.
IF weren't quite so pink and round
/ might look something like her, but
she was pale and sad. Somehow I am
not sad. don't know why, but feel
happy. wonderfully happy"
Turning away from the mirror, she
was just about to wrap herself in her
cloak when her sister entered the room,
carrying two narrow, white boxes. Bet
ty dropped her cloak, took the boxes
and, opening one OF them, lifted out a
deep, rich red rose, fresh and fragrant,
proudly dropping its heavy head and
filling the room with its odor Betty ex-
aminel the box, but there was no card.
Laying the rose upon the table and
turning to the other box, she lifted
from its depths q long stemmed, half
blown pink rose, delicate and yet Won
derfully sweet This rose was also
without card.
''IIow strange" murmured the girl,
"that they should both have had the
same ideaw
For a moment Betty stood silent. The
two roses lay upon the table. Suddenly
she heard her mothers voice calling to
her that It was time to start. Wrapping
her cloak about her, Betty turned and
ran lightly down the stairs. A moment
later the sound of carriage wheels
rumbled along the street.
.- But the roses? There was only one
rose now lying upon the table. only
one, but its heavy perfume filled the
whole room. and it's heart glowed like
great ruby
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
READ ALL THIS.
You Never Know the Mo-
ment When This lnfOr=
nation May Prove of
Infinite Value.

It is worth considerable to any citi.
zca of Unicn to know how to be cured
Of painful, annoying and itching piles.
Know then that Doan's Ointment is Il
positive remedy for all itchincss of the
skin for piles, eXcema, etc. One ap-
pIication relieves and soothes. Read
this trs' imoHy If its merits:
l. UbcIc, naker and confrctionc1 on
Main St. s ,ys: Il have usci Doan's
Ointment ond found it to be rs repre-
sentcI. 1t is the only remedy on the
face % the earth thai | know will cure
itching piles. one If the most trying and
irritating affiliations there is DOHn's )
Ointment procured at Holmes Pharma-
cy will cure the affection, and do it at
once. You aie welcome to use my name
as one who can speak to this effect from
experience.
For sale by all dealers. Price soc per
box. Foster-Nlilburn Go. Buffalo, n. Y,
sole agents for the United States. Re-
member the name-DOAN'S-an take
no other.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
First European Almanac,

1t is said that the first almanac print
ed In Europe was probably the Kalen-
darium Novum, by Regiomolitanus. 1t
was calculated for the years 1875,
1494 and 1873" In Budapest it was
published. Though it simply made men,
ton OF ecllpses and the places Of the
planets for the respective years. 1t was
sold for 10 crowns of gold, and the en-
tire impression was rapidly disposed Of
In Hungary, Germany, Italy, England
and France.
The first almanac-recorded as the
first-known to have been printed in
England was translated from the
French and appeared in 1897. Each
month introduces itself in descriptive
verse, as:
Called am Janeryere. the colde.
In Christpas season good tyre I love
fonge Jesu. that sometime Judas solde,
In me was circumcised for mans behove
Three Hinges sought the some OF God
above;
They kneeled downe. dyd Kim homage
with love
To God. their Lorde, that Is mans own
brother.
And so on for the remaining months.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
Not on Her Account.

Mary c., the six-year-old daughter
OF Presbyterian clergyman in small
Georgia village. had playmate, jim
my by name, Of whom it was her GUS
tom to make special mention In her
evening prayer Mt her mothers knee.
One evening, after some childish quar-
rel, Mrs. G. noticed that the boys
name was omitted from the petition
and said, MARY, aren't you going to
pray for Jimmy tonightW
mo, mother. He's q mean, hateful
boy, and I'm never going to pray for
him any more"
Her mother made no reply, not wish
Ing to add fuel to the fame, and decid-
ed to allow the youthful conscience to
work out the problem in it's own way.
In few moments she heard the little
girl climb out of bed, fall upon her
knees and say in tone Of guarded
Indifference:
God, you can bless Jimmy If you
want to, but you needn't do it ON my
account" Magazine.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
The Man who Loves words.

"Other folks, of course, have their
poor pleasures" writes Richard lie Gal
lienne in .Harper's Magazine, "but for
man who loves words no Joy the
world can give equals for him the hap.
piness of having achieved fine pas
sage or q perfect line. When Thack-
cray struck his fist on the table, as
the story goes, when he had finished
the scene Of Colonel Newcone's death
and exclaimed, BY God, this is genius9
there was no empire he would have ac-
cepted in exchange for that moment.
We often hear that your true artist Is
never satisfied with his work, his ideal
escapes him, the words seem poor and
lifeless, ETC., compared with the dream.
Whoever started that story knew very
little about the literary temperament
or he would have known that the words.
are the dream. The dream does not
exist even as n dream or only very inn
perfectly till it is, set down in words.
Yes, the words are the dream"
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
purma,y, sronster Cir.rs.

One Of the curiosities of Burma Il q
cigar of monstrous and alarming ap-
pearance. which every one smokes from
an early age. 1.-THE indigenous article
is monster eight inches long" writes
v. O. Scott O'Connor I'm his book, 1.-THE
Silken East" "It consists of chopped
wood. tobacco, molasses and various
herbs wrapped in the silver white skin
Of q bamboo. So wide In diameter is It
that it completely fills up the mouth
Of any young damsel who tries to
smoke 1t. For presentation purposes
this long cheroot is often wrapped at
one end I'm coat Of purple or gold
paper. It accumulates a formidable
mass of fire at the lighted end and re-
quires some skill in the smoking. But
the Burman infant acquires this skill
before he can walk and while lie Is
still ut the breast. No one thinks OF
smoking such cigar through. Two or
three long puffs, the lips Of the smoker
thrust out to meet the circle Of the
cigar, and 1t Is put down or passed on
to some good fellow sitting by"
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
The Curious Limpcts.

The limpets are curious kind Of
shellish. They resemble the abalones
in their habits, The interior is made
of the most brilliant colors, bronze ana
ridescent hues predominatlng. They
are found on the west coast of Mexico
and are so large that the people use
them for wash basins.
They are ferocious animals and prey
with great voracity on clans. The
process seems slow, but the limpet al
ways gets there. He gets his cover
over the unsuspecting clam and puts
his big foot on his shell, generally on q
weak spots. Then he whips out long,
wiryS tongue and proceeds to bore a
hole In his captive. When this Is done
the shell flies open, and the limpet is
free to feast on the poor CLAIMS car
cass. He eats but part and leaves
the rest for the fishes Of the sea.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
Pudding Wives.

The name Of pudding wives was
given to women who were occasionally
employed in some English monasteries
for making pastry and delicacies that
call for the deft touch OF feminine
hand. They were engaged by or with
the consent Of the regular cook Of the
monastery and had house or cham
ber in which to worK near the kitchen
called the pudding house. When ami
mails were slaughtered, especially when
pigs were killed. about st. Martins
day, these women's services were re-
quired to make black puddings; hence
the name pudding wives. They were
called in, too. for the making of pastry
on special occasions.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
Better Than Aladdin. L.mp.

Aladdin's famous lamp was doubt
less very handy little piece Of bric-a-
brac to have about the house, but there
is question whether 1t would be very
highly esteemed In these days OF nd
vertising wonders. Aladdin may prop
erly be regarded as back number.
Whenever he wanted anything he had
to earn 1t by the sweat Of his brow as
a metal pollsher. Nowadays people
who want things pat ads. in the news
papers-it's much easier than rubbing
an old Iamp-and they are served just
as effectively as was Aladdin by his
genii.-Philadelphia Record.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
A Muscular Minister.

A Kentucky senator tells of good
old Methodist minister in his state in
the pioneer days who was '1nuscutar
Christian"
"One day." says the senator, "after
the parson had found 1t necessary to
administer fistic punishment to- several
young toughs who persisted in disturb
ing the meeting at one Of the churches.
which he served. one OF his flock, noted.
as something Of hard hitter himself.
got up in meeting and said:
1T Is solemn duty Of this here
congregation to stand by Parson John
son. He does not seek trouble, but he.
will not show the white feather when
trouble is forced in his way. ! believe.
that. unrestrained by divine grace
Parson Johnson can whip any man in,
Kentucky. The Lord is with him. Lot
Us pray"
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
a MILDER CLIMATE.
In Arkansas, Louisiana, Texas.

Stock range ten To twelve months
in the year, two and three crops grow
in Il season. Now i the time to look
up location while the land i cheap
ON February 9TH and Dist and March
7th and Dist, Cotton Belt Route will sell
round trip homc-Scckcrs' tickets from
st. Louis, Thebcs, Cairo and Memphis
to points in above named states at rate
Of SIS, or one fare plus 81 where it
makes less than $l5.
One way coloniSt tickets. February
Dist and March DIST at half fare, plus 81
Write for map. time table, and ask
about rates to any point.
L. P. SMITH, It. p. A.
Cotton Belt Route, Atlanta, Ga.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
You,n he Glad to Know This

The lucidity Of this statement, made
by medical journal, will appeal to all
hurried readers: further evidence Of
the complex character of toxins was
also furnished by the studies of haze
molysins and bacteriolysins, which had
their origin in the union of an ambo-
ceptor and complement and were anal
ogous to toxins, the amboceptor repre-
senting the haptophore and the compile
ment the toxoph0re group"
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
Slippery Shedding.
cy is the pavement,

Icy is the pavement.
Slippery is the street:
Don't know II you're standing
On your head or feet.
IL you are not careful
When you strike rut
You will fall and almost
Crack your cocoanut.
Start down in the morning,
Also In hot haste;
Late perhaps in leaving.
Haven't timo to waste.
Strike bit of pavement
Where tho leo Is thick,
Just 60 help you hurry
Como down double quick.
Comes a pompous party.
Dignified and fat.
Coat without q wrinkle.
Tall his shiny hat;
Loops tho loop or maybe
The toboggan rides;
Though you know It's wicked,
Laugh to split your sides.
When the walk IS CLASSY
AS q villains eyes, N
Slippery for the sinner.
For the saint likewise.
When without half trying
You can make q hit
Bless me. 1t is pleasant
And delightful-nit.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
His wish Was Gratiaed.

HHb "hsH WIN HFutIHed.
Her head had dropped upon his shoul-
der.
"If only" he whispered. "thy cheek
could remain there foreverr'
Little thought he what was to be.
Little thought he until he got home
and tried to remove her cheek from his
dress coat with ammonia and alcohol.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
Apple. ne .Niehtnnn.., !,

The apple Is such common fruit
that very few persons are familiar
with its remarkably efficacious medici-
nal properties. Every one ought to
know that the very best thing he can
do Ia to eat apples just before retiring
for the night.-Family Doctor.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
A Wise Precaution.

Junior Partner-our traveller ought to
be discharged. He told one Of our Gus.
toners that am nm ignorant fool.
Senior Partner-I shall speak to him
and insist that no more Office secrets
be divulged.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
One Day.

Finish every day and be done with
It, You have done what you conld.
Some blunders and absurdities no doubt
crept in. Forget them as soon ms you
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
A word to the wise is impossible.

Work like dog for sixteen hours
day and your employers heirs win have
time and money to investigate frensied
finance.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
Had 70 Do L,

"Jcnlins made an assignment the
other day"
''For the benefit Of his creditorsT'
mo, for the benefit Of his wife. He
is praying for his creditors"
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
Those Politicians.

But when election day, alas,
Has passed into the book OF fate,
They cannot see us as we pass
Or stand around outside and wait;
From that time on we go to grass
Or come a-knocking at the gate.
There only seems to be ahead
A year OF patient suffering.
We might as well. perhaps. be dead.
But let us meekly bear the sting
And keep the briny tears unshed,
For they'll be friendly In the spring.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
Humor Guo Philosophy
BY DUNCAN N. SMITH
PERT PARAGRAPHS.

There are men who are egotisticaI
enough to expect opportunity to send
O search warrant for them
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
Good Union Man.

"W'hy don't you shine your own
shoes?"
II used to, but had to quit. You
see, I am not a member Of the boot
blacks union"
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
Sufficient

An artist draws picture,
An equine draws a dray,
A man who marries draws a blank
Sometimes, I've heard them say.
A thirsty man draws water,
A blossom draws bee.
II / can only draw my pay.
That's good enough for me.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
finance.

Girls like diamond engagement
ring, not necessarily as IN article OF
display, but merely ms an evidence of
good faith.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
Losing Its Charm.

"a college professor says 1t Is not
wrong to firt"
'Too bad! Now the girls won't care
anything about It,"
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10

Widows, Icing sophisticated, are
harder to catch than they appear and
harder to please than they seem.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10

The TIMES and Metropolitan
Magazine one year for $3.50.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
There only seems to be ahead
Could See Through Him.

"She Is great mind reader"
|sYesf"
when tramp knocks at her door
she always knows that he wants pie"
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10

A fine run Of sleighing makes a
pathetic impression OH the purses Of
the young men.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10
Natural consequences.

~He is full Of prunes."
"What could you expect7 He has
lived three years In q boarding house."
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1905-03-10

There are people who, even If they
could take hint, wouldn't know what
to do with It,
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-07-01
TO PROMOTE UNIFORMITY,
offers Of Juveni o Court 0rgonia' for
This Purpose

\ mcolm. " Judges and officers n
the Juvenile courts Of the state was
hrld w me Juvenile court room ycstcr'
day. AZ Nhluh preliminary steps were
taken for the organization Of nm ASSOC
citation of the Juvenile court Officers for
the promotion of uniformity In moth
ODDS and Processes nud other matters Of
Interest iu such work
County Attorney T. H. Christensen
Nus phoron as honorary chairman and
Dan r. rullull strupgmuhor ~ Judge
Brown. temporary secretary After
considerable discussion HH lO the pur'
poses of the association II was dee
cIdod 10 meet some time IN August
and perfect % permanent Organization,
Those present at the meeting Yesterday
from out NJ tONn Nclo Judge I.rWiH
CARBON " Logan Judge A. y, Patton
and Probation Oniccr H. g. Jacobs OF
ogden. judge Hen n, Lindsey Of
Denver was present az spectator Tho
Ralt Lake officers present were Judge
Brown, County Attorney Christensen
and Probation Onloeis Woods ana Mrs
W, NJ Young
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-07-01
HoNoRED IN DEATH.
Friends Pay Glowing Tribute TO tho
Memory of A fred Best

Tho fmnul sorNu,- over the r"'
MAINS of lho mlo Alfred Best were held
IA the Nmur House ward al ~ wp
Flida', June 80, For years The de-
coucd Nuf 10 mombrr ul tn Sugu
lluutc ward, but m fcbuur., Whom
the ward Vw d,ldcd, ho hcpmc %
member NJ lho Waterloo ward
The services Ncrr conducted by mo
lishoLnc of the Waterloo ward, FIRST
counselor Jos j, paNuoF, w. prrsld'
ing The music WAS furnished by n
special quartet consisting of Mossrs
Dougul aud Graham, Misses browning
and Cooper The quartet SANG " Need
Thee Every Hour Prayer Was offered
hy Elder George 'riemon The quar-
lot rendered "Ouc SNcolly solemn
Thought The Speakers IN lhclI or,
der Woro Bishop N, NJ Atwood Of
lnr Of the Fourteenth ward, President
seymour n Young Of the First Coun'
eff NJ Seventies, President Frank v
TAYLOR NJ Granite stake, bishop John
NJ, Whitaker of sugar ward aud Iouu'
fcor Jos j, DaSncN Jr Of waterloo
ward,
splendid tributes were paid io the
mcmor, ana noble HE II The deceased,
10 hls ndollly lH a pioneer worker of
urlN days, hf straightforward honor
able course IN nll his dealings his
generosity and genial dispositions MS
devotion 10 the cause 20 dear IN MS
heart, and his uulinchmg integrity to
God ana MS work II WnT made plain
what a splendid chumctcr be- main
laiuod ana now devoted u husband and
loving father ne WIS among his larRc
family, who nov mourn his demise
Tho quartet rendered ns a closing
selection Nearer Ny God, 20 Thee
The bouodlc,Ion was pronounced by
counselor John r. Smith of sugar
House ward, ana the grave was dcdi'
catcd by his lifc long noIsh0or Elder
VIM n. Foster
The pnlhcArcrs were Royul "
Young, DpnIol Harrington, William u,
Foster. Iohn g. cutler Jr william H.
Npcdhim aud Henry NJ, DinwoodoS
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-07-01

special paving tax The situation re-
solves iWclf down 90 pain uuolllun
" public ethics, u question ilNoNlnh
90 dignity Of lho ,ily Council u,,lL
instance To pcrnl ilI ordinances ulld
INSTITUTIONS To hn brushed Widr N
should NJ least ubsnlNr me engineer Nhn
hnp insisted an along ihni These orll'
muvcH aud Instruction. were mace w
bo observed,
IN submitting this matter lo 'nul
honorable body Nlsh ~ mlk, n nam
that personal luminosity lul hlgh lr'r
Ing h. not nu element o. WmplN y
question of witch is llr oNpodivnl
ihlug ~ do W lWlWt which ~ we
lghl lhiNg lo du. l''sw llulh Hun'
mliud, GGuUGE ~ lNlEl'
tu. Engineer
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1905-07-01

,hal most ~ The opposition has been
encountered. ! do not want 10 be mlf-
undprUood sOmo " tho most ardent
advocates ~ ,hc Juvenile courts have
been found among police of'icert, and
every ono NJ thrm VIII tell you that
the lul fol boys W the tohoggnn slidc
straight into he'll They win also toll
you that the juNouilo rourl system ~
doing moro IN 70 vhnrlto prevent crlmo
than the lallH ana crlmlnal courts Viii
do IN 20 years,
CARE ron MEN Not Law
II h. very simple christ taught IL
iWu ,huufunl years ago, llo mll,
overcome evil Win good The uyC.
nile law Wlr "lhr ,hld shall bo trcat
~ not nH criminal but at nUodiug uld,
hulp, assistance pnDuurnEomuui uul
the lrmn,fa which commands respect.
and iut the brutality that prudurrt
hate" Hate hcgrN hate Violence be-.
gets violence love boroU love 'rhe
Juvenile court if IL return 90 the lnll
NJ our DlNmc MMcr W. know mat
force No. mot noucNtHrS whom human ma
luro VI STUDIED md understood, Boys
ere Nonl alone lu reform schools anu
not onn ever failed ~ Ru We Wludy
uN lpW and for men more The best
NJ ppod childhood, when character b.
pmWl' and run De- nodded 400 clny IN the
pullnrN hand,
II never epW bad boy. SomoWhcln
down IN every suul W. the image OF God,
The ughl muster win bring N out But
too often the hoy does hud things This
~ not because the boy rs inherently
bud God never rroniod anything bad,
Environment was had Training Wgs
hnd ana a thousand other things mldo
that nhlld We NJ the luvonllu court
mN No. ~ unfortunate rather man bad,
IT, iR Wrik rather Than vicious ilo
docs mot want punishment We wants
love Ilc wants NnducN lie wants
psrIVlnnpc llo wants hrnnoN Ot
rpiHr. nll of these lhugH may rccm 30
fuIl. hul II they do, rest assured mot
hate md violence, force ana punlnl'
mui would not hHyo succeeded, Thr
mhn.rpl good IN an individual may BIZ
Fu polluuscd aud covered by bad onNl.
iuumeU and bad influence NJ N'nrV
standing that the good environment and
good influence Of = trV months may
not accomplish u change
n lakcs time, II takes plllcncc liui
n ~ worth white. \ hoy w worth moro
than dollars aud r'utf lie lH tho great
est Investment IN the world lliN ease N
the most important That any court was
over CHILLED uppu lu handle. MA yet hn
hes narn the most neglected rmnlurr w
tho world There ARE over 100000 boys
brought lo the ialle ana criminal courts
oNpry wear Tho criminal law went ait
or the hoy The Juvenile laW goes hitor
those who are responsible for the boy
4 negligent parent may 30 "a jail 4
helpless pircul viii be helped,