davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12

The Express is still willing to sell mining edition
Zone week old) for cents. Saturdays issue cents
Age seems to add value to the Express if nothing
else does. It's now in the antiquary class
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12

Paul Morton, who is essentially by long training
railroad steps of the naval department tn run
life insurance company What about shoemakers stick
ing to their lasts When good railroad men are needed
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12

Wasn't 1t rather rubbing it in that the very night
after the ghost refused to walk for the Angeus theater
performers local celebrity should lecture on Ghosts
with sver collection" attached and turn 'en awavp
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12

The knights of Columbus having been entertained ca
1avfshy in and about Los Angeles now gone In San
Francisco for days quietude before resumng
their journey east.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12

1t is reported that John W. Gates is touring Furona
with Mercedes" That Mrs. Gates may not worry LET
1t be added that this Mercedes" simply certain make
of automobile.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12

No doubt Paul Morton appreciates the honor of being
the ruler of Uncle Sans Pinaforcally speaking
but to rule the Equitable Life at 100000 year
will fit him better financially
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12

The knights Of Columbus having now gone Los An
gees turns confidently and expecantly toward the next
similar gathering Entertaining conventions is our long
suit.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12

Grover Cleveland had a pretty good lob on hand
when twice he ran these United States but that task
was only preliminary practice to the job he has now cut
out for himself
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12

The Sixth ward councilman evidently believes that ba
who resigns and then recalls may exist to bluff another
day. Some day that bluff will be caled-not recalled
Then hear a howl!
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12

The city hall janitor comprises the present governing
force OF the municipality We may now judging by the
reputation of anitors in general be to be under an
autocracy.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12

How glad the irrigation commission must have felt
upon its arrival here that this was not dry" town.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12

The society set over in Paris is infatuated with
ballooning. Parsians always were fond of hot air.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12
Population of Los Angeles OI.249

Most of our city fathers in Salt Lake City now
still the city isn't noceably different in any way.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12

is never without honor save in his own
country
Miss Pomona-Probably his neighbors
grow weary of hearing him say: II told
you so''
A Canon City, Colo. paper advertises
Sweet things in shirt waists" or course
they are.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12

Butter is now shipped TO England in
large quantities from the fertile plains
OF Uruguay
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12
Gods Out-of- Doors

seek no riches. sordid gold
Nor state. nor position high;
l care not for the things that men
Esteem as great; pass them by.
All I would ask: the wealth that pours
Ger all the earth--God's out-of doors!
From toll and worry I'm unbound:
Sunshine is gold enough for me!
No anxious cares have me enthralled
Here I have joy, for I am free.
All I would ask: these peaceful shores
Nepenthe land-God's out-of-doors!
Oakland is boasting of a woman who
died there after living 1O7 years. why
boast? Most any one would be willing
to die after less time than that in Oak
land.
The dual telephone system may be good
for town, but it hasn't yet reached the
point where it enables a man to call his
own number up and hold an argument
with himself.
What could have happened to the editor
of the Jewell (Kas.) Republican? when
you go to the city, writes he, 'you
wonder how so many people live, but
after the city fellows become acquainted
with you. the mystery isn't so great"
We offer the good brother our condol-
ences.
OF course, the women do not know t,
Or they would stay away instead
But a photographer must see 'em
Each one standing on her head!
No wonder President Roosevelt likes to
live at Oyster Bay. One bivalve will
breed 10000 children in a season.
zone man hung the jury announces
the Kansas City Times He had large
task. Usually the jury hangs the one
man.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12

Mrs. Snappem (who has been suffering
from toothache)-Thank goodness, I've
had that tooth out at last!
Mr.. Snappem-Happy tooth!
Mrs. Snappem-What do you mean?
Mr.. Snappem-It's out of reach of your
Tit-Bits
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12
What Oscar Did


When Norway slipped the yoke that
hitched
Her up with Sweden as team,
And old King Oscar was informed
That faded thus was half his dream,
Did Oscar cry, or plead, or beg?
Or say: Come back!" Repent" Give
oer!"?-
His language was unfit for print'!-
He sworel
o good King Oscar, thanks, thanks be!
We feared to hear speech of woe,
A painful screed, regrets and such,
To heal the wound that hurt you so.
But, nay! You are human king,
And for t we love you more and more;-
Your language was unfit for print" =
You swore!
w H C.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12

The married men have better halves.
Sailing thro' life's waters;
But have you heard that bachelors
Often have better quarters?
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12

The editor of the Boulder (Colo.) Herald
cannot understand why it is that people
who are otherwise the embodiment of
honesty will not hesitate to steal an UNI
brella." When did they get yours, fell
low sufferer?
Carrie Nation, II is reported. has de-
serted Kansas for Oklahoma What has
Carrie against Oklahoma? Or is Kansas
past redemption?
Togo won with ease-one might say
really with Japanese.
The Chicago Tribune loudly proclaims
that ''the law will be enforced" When?
Also, isn't it so badly fractured that it
should be re-enforced?
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12

'Tis the man on pleasure bent that is
oftenest broke.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12
Pi-IineS and Pick-upS
The Expected

Eftsoon the sweet girl graduate will don
her gown so white,
And in her fine, high-sounding way. will
train the world Alright;
Soon, too. the callow youth will spiel. in
accents strong and hot.
The proper way to keep the earth from
going clean to pot
This is thing that comes with spring,
One of the blessings" June doth bring.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12
THE HER4LDJ CITY CIRCULATION

The Herad's circulation In the city Of Los Angeles
10 larger than that Of the Examiner or the Express
and second only to that Of the Times
Los Angeles herald., 1905-06-12

Mr.. oxnard-why is it that a prophet
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1905-04-06

trusted with duties, powers and re-
sponsibilities, even when they act
subject to the absolute supervision
end controlof our Courtof Appeals.
and applies scih equal force TO The per-
Torrance BY the registration officers of
their other functions IN ahe soo~k Of reg
istrati0H.
When, therefore, we realize that
this is the only objection that is Sc
riously urged 10 influence the views
and votes Of our people who wish
preservation and protection against
the evils of debassd ADD ignorant
negro suffrage, is il too much to
hope and believe that the Amend
ment presented to them for the pur-
pose OF securing to them this pre-
servation and protection will grow
in favor the more carefully it is con-
sidered, and in November next will
be made a vital force in the Consti-
tuition OF Maryland by a decisive
popular ratification
MURRAY VANDIVER,
Chairman Democratic State Cent? Committee.
March q, 1905.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1905-04-06
The Old Time Way,

Our Grandmothers gave US pow
ders and teas because they knew
nothing OF modern medicine and
methods. In this age of progress
and discovery, nicely coated, COM
pressed tablets are fast superceding
the old time powders and teas.
Rydale S Liver tablets are compress
sed chocolate coated tablets, easy to
swallow, pleasant in effect, always
reliable. They contain ingredients
shat cannot be used in powders or
teas. Ingredients that have an effect
upon the liver that is never obtain
ed from the so called liver powders
etc. A trial will prove their merits.
Loker & deWaal.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1905-04-06
Perverted Proverbs.

The pension is mightier than the
sword.
Actresses will happen in the best
regulated families.
What can't be cured must be in
sured.
One swallow does not make din
ner.
People who live in glass houses
should pull down the blinds.
Train up servant in the way she
should go and the first thing you
know she's gone.
Soap deferred maketh the dirt
stick.
The lovers money is at the root
of all jewelers..
'Tis never too late to end.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1905-04-06
Mr. Kirkssy's Recommend alton.

Mr.. Kirksey writes:-I give o
positive guarantee with every box
of Rydale's Stomach Tablets and
Liver Tablets | sell, and have never
been asked to refund the money in
a single instance. l have used these
tablets in my family with best re-
suits. W. L. Kirksey, MorgantOn,
N. G. Rydale's Tablets are prepared
by The Radical Remedy Company,
Hickory, N. c. who authorize every
dealer in their preparations toguar-
antee every box or bottle of their
medicine, they sell. Loker & de-
WAL.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1905-04-06

A brief told history, but true,
Rydale's Cough Elixir will prevent
this happening 20 you. 1t will
check the progress ola cold at once,
prevent the cough becoming deep
seated, and thus ward of consump-
ton. This modern scientific remedy
kills the germs that cause throat and
lung diseases, and by its stimulat-
ing and tonic effect upon the respira-
tory organs help nature speedily
restore these organs TO robust
health. Loker & deWaal.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1905-04-06
FARMS WANTED.

| HAVE advertised in Southern Mary
land papers to obtain farms for my Gus
toners who are ready to purchase now.
have arranged with the local press in
sections where land is hard to obtain to
advertise ali property placed with me
| am also in communication with the
State Board of immigration, the general
superintendent coming from my own
county, now waiting for hundreds of cir
cllars to distribute. am in a position
to sell considerable realestate. l have
agents in the city looking for bargains in
city property to exchange for country
property. L. C. QUINN,
SIS Z. n. Avenue,
March y, 'O5-d. Baltimore. Nd.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1905-04-06
A Daredevil Ride

often ends in q sad accident. To
heal accidental injuries, use Buck
lens Arnica Salve. "A deep wound
IN my foot, from an accident, writes
Theodore Schuele, of Columbus.
o., caused me great pain. Physi-
clans were helpless, but Bucklen s
Arnica Salve quickly healed il. y
Soothes aud heals burns like magic.
20c at all druggists.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1905-04-06
Frightful sufsrings Relieved.

Suffering frightfulIy from the viru-
lent poisons of undigested food, C.
G. Grayson, of Lula, Miss, took DIR.
Kings New Life Pills, with the
results" he writes, that | was
cured. All stomach and bowel
disorders give way to their tonic,
laxative properties. 25c at all drug
stores, guaranteed.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1905-04-06

Twin keep constantly on hand &C
Leonarotown wharf full supply OF
BOARDS. SCANTLTNG, WEATHER
BOARDING. FLOORING. PALINGs,
DRESSED BOARDS. sHlNGLEs, &C.
All orders for Lumber, Doors. Sash.
Lathe. Lime and Hair promptly at.
tended 20.
~ CASH upon delivery at yard.
july 1-tfs JOS. p. EKAL.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1905-04-06

n0- Il wonder why Osler did not
advise the chloroforming of women
when they get to be sixty years old?"
He probably knows that women
never get that old. Houston Post.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1905-04-06

no. Helm going to bring Kad-
ley home to dinner on Thursday.
She-Why, | thought you hated
him so; besides, I'll have to cook
the dinner on Thursday.
He-I know.-Ledger.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1905-04-06
A Different Kind.

Dick-I tell you that girl accepts
rings from men she doesn't know.
Clara don't believe it. How
could she?
Dick-Why she has to. She's a
telephone girl.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1905-04-06
Greenwich Mill.

FLOUR, Meal and Feed on hand
for sale all the time cheap for Cash.
Hereafter. in order to avoid hav-
ing to keep mill books. all orders
must be accompanied by the cash.
r. D. greenwich.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1905-04-06

30 He who boasts that be never
kissed a girl may be telling the
truth, but nobody enyies him.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1905-04-06

n0- Contentment is better than
money aud quite as scarce.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1905-04-06

II boys keep on with cigarettes,
That now are all the rage,
They need not fear the chIoroform
At sixty years Of age.
Chicago Chronicle.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1905-04-06
A. Y. GRAY.
COMMISSION MERCHANT,
Cor. Ia. & Ave. 10th st.,
Washington. D. @.

For the sale OF all kinds of Country
Produce. Will give special attention TO
the fl ling of all orders for merchandise.
Prompt returns.
REFERENCEs-JohnH II. Mitchell, Port
Tobacco; Joseph II. Key, Leonardtown;
Spencer G Jones, Rockville; r N. Will
son, of Wilson, Farmer L. Co., Balti-
more; National Bauk of Republic, Wash
ington, ID. c.; Jacob Warden, Berry
vile, Va.
Correspondence solicited with stock
shippers. Write for market tin tags for
shipping Veal and Lambs. ALWAYS mail
card giving the number used.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1905-04-06

Washington and Potomac
Railroad Company.
TRAINS FROM WASHINGTON AND BAL
TIAORE.
Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1905-04-06

Time Table.
In Effect Sept. !. 1904, go n. m.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-11-04

Eyes, it viii be a walk-over for US,
but at the same time there will be
some necessary expenses to be met"
of course, and he's the chicken to
meet them" added one of the others.
Nothing mean about Bowser, you
know
For he's a jolly good fellow;
For he's jolly good fellow;
For he's a jolly good fellow,
And nobody viii deny
Yes, necessary expenses Mr.. Bow
ser" softly continued the chairman,
land. Of course, you are prepared to
meet them %
II don't believe in buying my cleo
ton"
ooh. no, no, no. There will be the
printing OF the tickets, your share
toward the fireworks and a few other
things. You can place $500 in my
hands and L viii see to these trities
Mr.. Bowser sat in his chair like a
stone man.
by thunder. Bill. but the old cock
is going to bolt" exclaimed one of the
committee, as he brought his fist down
on the table
Il told you what a stingy old bloke
he was. va, on such a mani"
81 don't say that the 500 will carry
you through, but it will make a good
beginning" said the seductive chair
man. MY friends here
Mr.. BoWser rose up.
whats the bloke a-goin' to do.
Bi1I?" asked the man who had spoken
before.
Dunno, but he looks like a hunker."
$50 he do, blast his old bald head!'
Mr.. BOwser slowly raised his right
arm and pointed to the half-open
door.
what is it?'' asked three men in
chorus.
Co out!''
ssWhati The old cock turns US outl''
''Nr. Bowser.'' began the chairman,
s'this end of the ward needs and is
determined to have an honest man,
and we are here this evening to
''Giti''
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-11-04
Probable Errors.

August ziesing. the new president of the
American Bridge company, was talking
about a business man who made a good
many mistakes.
''1These mistakes" he said. ARE always
in the mans own favor He profits by
them. Indeed, though it is SO with too
many mistakes, errors and miseoncep-
Il once knew young draughtsman
who sat bent over a drawing board from
till daily, drawing drawing, drawing.
s'This was hard work. The young man
needed a lot Of sleep to keep him fit for
it. But the baby-he had recently been
married-robbed him of four or five hours
rest every night.
AT a M, in the chill gray dawn of
an October morning, the poor young
draughtsman, as he paced the floor with
the shriel1ing baby in his arms, said to
his wife. YEARLY:
q I wonder why it Is this child won
sleep at night?''
Il can't imagine the young woman
answered. I haven't a bit of trouble
keeping her asleep in the daytime Los
Angeles Times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-11-04
No Benefit
No Cost.

If you are weak and worm
out-if you are nervous, irrita-
bic, have headache, backache,
neuralgia, or periodical pains, it
is because you have exhausted
your nerve force.
If you cannot sleep, and are
thus robbed of the rest which
nature demands for the restor-
alton of mental and physical
vigOr, your system will con-
tinue to run down.
DR.. Miles Nervine restores
vitality by soothing and
Strengthening the nervous
system, thus inducing refresh
ing sleep, and imparting
strength and vigor to all the
organs Of the body.
There are very few instances
where Nervine will not benefit;
if not, your druggist will re-
fund the money.
when I began taking DR.. Niles
Neryine I had a very sour stomach.
with pain extending far around on my
4etG slde-attended with extreme nerv-
business I dreaded to have nirbt
come, as 1t was impossibIs Tor me to
sleep Everything I ate distressed. me-
Before had finished one bottle Of
Neryine there was such a CHANGE that
my husband bought six more which
has restored ne to health
MRS. JENNIE sndMs,
Rushville, Ind
Or. Miles Nervine Is sold by your
druggist who Will guarantee that the
first bottle VIII benefit. IL lf falls, ne
viii refund your money.
Miles Medical Co.. E1khart, Ind
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-11-04

The life and achievements OF Luther
Burbank are full of unique interest. In
reaching the position he now occupies
as the foremost plant breeder in the
world, he has labOred under many dis
couragements, often, in the earlier
days Of the work, suffering actual
want. and steadily encroach1ng upon
his savings in later years in order to
devote every available cent to the fur
therance of his work. The story OF
Mr.. Burbank's achievements is fully
told in Mr.. w. S. Harwood's book, just
issued by The Macmillan company
1.-THE New Creations in Plant Life
Charles Majors new novel, "Yo-
landa," has just been published by the
Macmillan company. The true ro-
nance is what one finds in the novels
OF Mr. Charles Major. NO more pl-
quaint beWitching heroine than the
small, brown-eyed Yolanda has ap-
peared in fiction since 1.-The Pride of
JennicO." Mr.. Majors new novel re-
sem bles when KnighthoOd Was in
Flower" more than it resembles DOR
othy Vernon" or any Of his other
books. The adventures of the several
young people which it relates takes
them through many perils, crises, and
extraordinary dilemmas; and while
the IOve-story captivates the reader,
it's whole course is marked by constant
diversion.
book. "The Fortunes of the Landrays,"
occupied one of the most famous
houses on the Maryland Eastern Shore.
For about five years he and his brother
owned WoOdlawn Mansion, the prop
erty which was cut off by George
Washington from his own estate to be-
come the home of his adopted daugh-
ter, Nellie GUSTS, when she married
the generals favOrite nephew, Lau-
renee Lewis. The room in which MI
Kester did his work was the one that
had been occupied by Lafayette on
the occasion of his last visit to Nellie
Gusts. The old house when purchased
by the Kester brothers was in a de-
plorable state of disrepair, but While
Paul. the dramatist- attended to the
restoration of the house, Vaughn, who
is an enthusiastic farmer, turned his
attention to the neglected acres, and
grew corn and chapters together, and
dug potatoes and ideas with equal zest
A new volume of stories by James
b. Connolly called THE Deep Seas
Toll" viii be published in a few days.
The book deals with the dangers and
pleasures the difficulties and triumphs
of the staunCh fisherman Of GlOuces-
ter. No one has ever handled these
subjects as we'll as AIr. Connolly.
Little Brown & Co s November pub
LEGATIONS include the following: THE
Florence of Lander" by Lillian Whit
ing; III LibrO D'Oro," a collection of
more than 120 miracle stories and
sacred legends translated from the
Italian by Mrs. Francis Alexander;
american Railroad Rates" by Judge
Walter c. NOyes, author of 1.-THE Law
of IntercOrpOrate Relations" In and
About the Old Missions of California. -
an historical and pictorial account of
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-11-04

The blade of a digging hoe was sup
ported horizontally on two bricks and
a fire kindled on the ground beneath
it. On the middle of the hoe was put
a small heap of the seeds of a red
fruited variety of eggplant and over
this was inverted the half of a cocoa
nut shell having a hole in the top. A
piece Of bamboo was stuck on &c the
shell over the hole by lump of clay.
AS vapor issued from the bamboo tube
the patient inhaled this by placing his
Inns to the top. Then he spat into a
bucket of water, and then again in
hailed the vapor. After a quarter
hours treatment the patient and a
friend said they could see the tooth
ache worm in the water.
Straits Budget.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-11-04
A Bad Break.

The sect OF the Schwenkfelders, at
their annual reunion in Allentown, Pa,
were eating their famous feast of bread
and apple butter
The long table was covered with great
plates of fine white bread, great dishes
of golden butter, and great bowls of
rich, brown apple butter
mo, you are mistaken said the Rev
A. r. Schorman Of Pandora, o., to a
reporter, eff you think that this is our
idea of fine banquet. This meal cele-
brates an historical event-the landing
meal in the new world It was a meal
composed only of bread and apple but
ter for the good reason that there was
nothing else to have just then
Mr.. Schorman, as he helped himself t.
the excellent apple butter, smiled.
when you accuse US Schwenkfelders
of regarding this as a real banquet"
he said, you mistake US and humiliate
US. You are like the stranger who Wis
tied the home of his boyhood friend.
HE and his boyhood friend had not
seen one another for more than thirty
years. Then they met by accident in
New York. and the resident took the
stranger home to dinner.
In the hosts handsome house, as
they sat in the parlor. the guest said:
d" so you are married, John?'
Dear. dear, yes John answered. I
am married and have three children.
They will be down to welcome you in
a few minutes
* Well, WELL said the guest. Tt seems
strange to think OF you as a father
And he sighed.
by the way the host began,
didn't you live in Cambridge after you
left Chicago?'
Ion. yes said the guest. I lived
there for some years.
Then perhaps you met Miss Nc
Wade?'
"The guest gave a loud laugh.
Met her?' he cried. Man alive,
that's a good one. Met her? I was en-
gagged to her. But so were all the other
fellows at one time or another. College
boys and clerks-But what's the matter,
John?' he broke off anxiously.
Miss McWade is my wife said the
host in a strange, dead voice. Los
Angeles Times.