Baxter Springs news. [volume] (Baxter Springs, Kan.) 1882-1919, 1905-11-30

you IN q minute and roll their eyes NJ
you and look upon you as n COM
mon person" and n you attempt any
familiarity they look at you a. much
as TO say: "Slr, I am not allowed to
associate with any except the 400"
Then they turn their backs and act 10
much like shoddy arlstocracy that you
would swear they were human.
I remember when "a was first In the
elephant corral, the keeper forgot TO
tell the big elephant who pa was, and
when the keeper raised up one foot
OF the elephant and examined q corn,
pa went up and pinched bunch on the
elephants leg and said to the keeper:
THAT looks to me like SPAWN" and
he nebbed II hard. Well, the elephant
groaned like q boy with q stone
bruise on his heel, and before pa knew
what was coming the elephant wound
his trunk under pa and raised pa upon
his tusks and was going to toss him In
the air and catch him rs he came
down and walk on him. when pa
yelled murder. and the keeper took IN
iron hook and hooked II into the ele.
plants skin. and said: LET that man
down." and he let pa down easy, and
the keeper some way showed the ele-
plant that pa was one OF the owners
OF the show, and that elephant acted
just as human as could be. for he fair.
ly toadled to pa, like q society leader
that has given the cold shoulder 10
some one that Is as good or better than
they, or like an impudent employe who
has insulted his employer and Is afraid
of losing his job. After that whenever
pa and 60 around the elephants they
bow down to us, and think l could
take an iron hook and drive an ele'
plant anywhere.
There are all classes among the AMI.
mails In q menagerie the same as hui
man society. The lions are like the
leaders OF society who are well born
and proud, but poor. They are always
invited everywhere. but never enter
tain, though they kick and find fault
and ogle everybody, and look wise and
distinguished.
The sacred cattle are too good I.
live and pose as the pious animals who
do not want to associate with the bad
animals and are constantly wearing an
air of Il am holier than any Of you,'
but they will reach through the bars
OF their cage and steal alfalfa from the
Yak and the mule deer, and II they
kick about 1t the sacred cattle look
hurt and act like 1t was part Of their
duty to take up collection, and they
below a sort Of hymn to drown the
kicking.
The different kind Of goats In 0
menagerie are the butters-in, or the
new rich, who get In the way OF the
society leaders and try to Guido them
in society stunts. but they smell sc
that the other animals are made sick
and the goats are only tolerated be.
cause animal society Is afraid to Of
fend them, for fear the leaders may
some time go into bankruptcy and the
goats will take their places and never
let them get q smell Of the good things
OF life.
The bears are the working people Of
the show, and the big grizzlies are the
walking delegates who control the
amalgamated association Of working
bears, and the occupants Of the other
cages have got to cater to Uncle
Ephriam, the walking delegate. or
be placed on the unfair list and
slugged.
The hyenas and the jackals. .and the
wolves, represent the anarchists who
are down on everybody In the show,
who won't do q thing to help along
and won't allow any other animal to
do anything. and who seem to want to
burn and slay, to carry q torch by
night and poison by day. and want
everything In the show to be chaos.
Those animals are never SO happy as
when the wind and lightning strike the
tent, and blow 1t down, and kill peo-
pie, and create q panic, and then these
anarchists sing and laugh and enjoy
their peculiar kind Of animal re-
ligion.
The zebras and giraffes are the
dudes of the show, and you can mag
inc, II they were human. they would
play tennis and golf, drive four in
hands and pose to be admired, while
the Royal Bengal tigers, II they were
half human, would drive automobiles
at the rate Of q mile minute on
crowded streets, run over people and
never stop to help the wounded, but
skip away with sneer, as much as to
say: What are you going to do
about It."
The seals are the clean-cut Baptists
of the show, who believe in INNER
sion, and they have more brain than
any animals in the show, because they
live on q fish diet, though they have
pneumonia cough that makes you feel
like sending for q doctor.
Gee, but last night when we thought
spring had come and We could start
on the road pretty soon, the snow fell
about a foot deep, and 1t was so. cold
that all the animals howled all night,
and shivered, and went on regular
strike. We had to put blankets on
them, and no one Of them seemed to
be comfortable except the polar bears,
the arctic foxes and the fat woman.