davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12
prrrOClnns.

Small boys have Il way Of llstenn
TO remarks that older persons max
and using them when least expected
\ mother WAS surprised the other la
TO have her young son reply ID he
when she was rcprOyng him for SOL
trihing misconduct: We'll. mamm'
you must put mp with me. You kno
I'm Just at the trying age"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12
The Rest lie Needed.

Mrs. Nagget,' said the doctor, your
husband needs a rest. He must go to
Europe for three months
"Ob, splendidw she exclaimed. "Ill
be delighted to go there"
Every good. You can go for three
months after he comes back. That Will
give him six months rest. ."-Philadel-
phla Ledger.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12

Mrs. Suburbs The conductor WAS
avrully nice c0mi.S ont ol he train
lie clve M a double tagt husband
But YOU co.ldn't S't on two eats. Mrs
Suburbs-No. but I was more satisfied
anyway. It seemed as If wls get
ting more for my monoy.-Dcu0it Tree
Press
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12

A sentimental poet writes. How ca
/ meet my darlingF'
After some delibcration over tn
question we have come = The con ~
sion that he can meet Ecr by a"pro1c'
ing her from an opposite direction.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12
A simple Statement.

II IS told OF certain minister that
one Sunday morning ne preached his
sermon with the following notice
Brethren. have forgotten my notes
and shall have to trust to Providence
but this evening will come better pre-
nared" /"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12
Did His Best.

She-After six weeks of married llfe'
Arthur. have reached the sad certain
ty that YOU do not love me. Arthur
NV dear. She-Its no use protesting
You should have married some credu-
lous, stupid girl! Arthur-Well, dar'
ling. I did my very best.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12

He-I am sure We could get along On
your income. | am not 4 man o. eH-
penslve tastes. She-Any one who
wants to marry me is man Of very
expensive tastes.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12

Don't beg: the world owes You Nv
Ing" said the prosperous citizen to the
mendlcant. But be was staggered by
the reply:
"All right, sir; lend me trihe I'LL II
pays up."-New York Herald.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12
Denuty.

A poetess asks. "Oh. where does
beauty lingerf" We think that we are
breaking no confidence when we reply
that In these artistic times it generally
fingers on the toilet table until the girl
puts II on with brush and powder
puff.-London Tit Bits.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12
His Preference.

eft is a positive delight to meet a
man you feel you can trust" remark
ed the individual with the high fore
head.
"Oh. | don't know. | prefer man
who pays cash." replied the man who
kept the grocery store.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12
His Spnfs.

"And do you mean TO say, madam,
that you and your husband never had
any spats?'
"Afy husband had pair once, sir. bu,
he gave 'em TO the boy who sprlnkled
our grass. ."-Cleyeland Plain Dealer.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12
4 Mean HetOrf.

Wife-According to this paper, hot
water will prevent wrinkles. Husband
50? Then how do you account fol
the numerous wrinkles | have? Wife
How do account for them? Husband
Yes: YOU keep me in hot water near
ly all the time, YOU know
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12
Brenking Ii Gently.

A young man married against the
will Of his parents, and in telling a
friend how to break the news 10 them
he said, Tell them first that am
dead and then gently work up to the
climax"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12
His Anxious Query.

Young Wife, don't like that cooking
school teacher at all. She has neither
patience nor consideration. She's actu
ally cruel. Husband-Great snakes
She doesn't really make you eat th'
things, does she?
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12

Teacho~-Wha a., e three personal
pronouAs: pvp.l-ilc. Sic and IT,
Teacher-Gi. al txam. lc OF their Use.
Pupll-HuSbanI wife and baby.-New
York Times.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12
a Rare Name.

"What is the rarest name | ever saw
on a hotel register" said a veteran
clerk, repeating a query put to him.
Amelia Turnipseed, and that was
years ago In Boston." Anew York Trib-
una
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12

Elsie - Mammals so disappointed.
Her cake didn't turn out as well rs
she expected. Tommy-Oh, good luck.
Then we can have as much of 1t as we
want
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12
Mountaineering

when a persons 'woolgathering'
that means he's lazy, doesn't 1t, paf"
Not necessarily, my son. He may
be gathering the wool off the lambs on
the Stock Exchange"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12
lie Was.

Servant Maid lin breathlcss excite
meno-Prcfessor, there's burglar In
the dining room! Professor deeply abb
sorbed, without looking up)-Tell him
I'm engaged.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12

Young Actor-How do you like my
Hamlet? Old Stager-Oh, it was your
Hamlet. was II? I thought | did not
recognize II as Shakespeare's.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12

Many & r.ln chivalrously shouts OF
woman. "C,d bless her" but :tils TO
b,e.s her idmsc'r. Burlington Hawk
nTa
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12
GronetricnI.

Don. kn0. J. =: Why. she lives in
tn same 81, re with YOU
"Yes. but she's not in the same cir
cle"-Clev, lnd Leader.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12
AnihignNns.

He-SOme one has 'siartoi ne So
that have big head Whot 90 yo
think Of it? he-Tne -c's rG.-ii2 IL 3
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12

True goodness is like the giowwo:n
in this, that it shines most when no
eyes except heaven are upon it.-Hase
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12

Lost tire is never found again. and
what we call time enough always
nroveS little enough.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1905-05-12

High aims form high characters. and
great objects bring out great minds
Edwards.
The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1905-11-04
The Boast Of Health

All doctors know that just be-
fore death the patient often ex-
periences what is called a
orally" nature making appar-
emily her last stand against the
symptoms which we call death
and it is quite likely that the
feeling which induces men to
boast of health is of the same
kind-an effort of nature to pro-
tect us against the coming sick
ness which the body has recog-
nized, though the mind has not.
The phenomenon occurs every
day in the cases of consumptive
patients, who brighten up and
grow hopeful just when the dis
ease is about to strike its hard
est blows, and it is quite possible
that it is more frequent than
has yet been recognized that the
approach of fever, for example,
is signaled by an unusual con
seriousness of health. 81 have
never felt so well in my life,"
says the patient, who twenty
four hours after is lying pros
trate and whose friends quote
his statement as illustrating
once more the ancient and de-
pressing belief.
The boast had nothing to do
with the illness, but it preceded
it, and men, attracted by the
violent contrast, almost instinct
lively link the two together as in
some way and to some extent
cause and effect. Next time
those who heard it, if they feel
that rush of health in their veins.
will avoid Boosting of it, and
the relation of the two will es-
cape attention. Moreover, it
The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1905-11-04

must not be forgotten that boast
ing is of itself a sign of weak
ness, either temporary or perma,
nent, and that consequently fail
ure follows boasting more fire.
quently than it follows silence.
The perfect driver says he is per-
feet just when he is most CAFE
less, and the resulting spill is
remembered when the thousand
and one escapes due to the san {
drivers skill and hardihood are
forgotten.
The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1905-11-04
Foreign Commerce This Year To
Reach A Billion

A bulletin issued by the Bur
eau of Statistics of the Depart
ment of Commerce and Labor
estimates that the foreign com
MERGE Of the United States for
the calendar year 1905 will
amount to more than Il billion
dollars. For the nine months
ended in September the imports
of materials for use in manufac-
turing amounted to 1922, 600, 900
and the exports of manufacture
ers to 1921, 900, 600.
Manufacturers materials now
form As. 4 per cent. of the total
imports of the United States,
and manufactured articles 80. 26
per cent. of the total domestic
exports.
The bulletin says that manu-
facturers' materials imported in
the nine months ended with
September, 1905, were twice as
great in value as in the cores
pording months of 1890, while
manufacturers'eXports were four
times as great as in the CORES
ponding period of 1890.
Of tropical and subtropical
products alone the quantity
brought into the United States
from abroad amounted in the
fiscal year 1905 to over $500, 600,
600.
In the nine months ending
September, 1905, imports of
crude materials reached 1905,
1854.
The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1905-11-04
"I'T Not Be A Candidate In 19O8!'

" "N' IN - SuhoIooIS III l|OO!
PresidentRoosevelt's party re-
turned to Washington Friday
morning, from Memphis, Tenn,
where they left the executive
Wednesday evening. The home
ward journey was uneventful.
Wednesday, before parting
from his party, the President
entertained them at dinner in
the Signet. Someone sugge sted
that he would probably be OBJ
liged to make a number of
journeysduring his "next term. -"
There will not be any next
term for me-" he said, with en-
phasis. 81 am now serving my
last"
"But suppose that you are
nominated anyway"
II will not be nominated, y
he exclaimed.
The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1905-11-04

operating as if in conjunction
and in one grand effort to kill,
it is reasonable to believe that
no great number Of ducks can
remain in the waters hereabouts,
when to all intent and purposes
no more drastic measure could
be adopted, either to eXtermin-
ate wild waterfowl, or drive
them beyond the reach of the
army of determination. No
grander display of force would
be used in the determination of
pests than is always witnessed
on the first days cunning on
the flats, and usually more ducks
are to be seen on the opening
days than are found during
other days of the season. If
the duck was a bird of prey, a
nuisance and worthless as an
edible commodity, big guns,
nets, an arsenal Of small arms,
and persistent hunt could not
be brought to bear with more
telling effect in driving them
away forever from the flats.
The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1905-11-04
PREPARING
FOR DUCKS
Why Wild Water Fowl Are Leaving
The Susquehan1a FIafs-Parf
Played BY Power Boats,
Big Gunners And Duck
Meters

on the SuS1uenannd ll;ltS. AS
Mondays, Wednesdays and Fri
days are cunning days during
the month of November, the
season will open with Wednes
day, November 1. 1t is said
that all owners of ducking out,
fits for sink box shooting have
chartered their boats for the
first days gunning-some have
chartered for the first two or
three days. and others for a lon
ger period. The charter of out
fits to sports, who come here
from the larger cities, is IL source
of considerable revenue to many
of our local duck hunters, who
after the first few days Of gun
ming, turn their on fit, consist
ing Of large and small boat, sink
box and 200 or 300 decoys, over
to other parties to be gunned n
shares.
In many cases the owners of
outfits keep cunning through.
out the season, but it frequently
occurs that what they receive
from the sports for the use Of
their outlay for the opening
days, frequently exceeds the
amount they receive for the re-
mainder Of their seasons work.
There was Il time when ducks
We're more plentiful, and the
charter rate probably lower than
it is today; then there was scar
cely any diminution in the num-
Der of ducks after the onslaught
of the first few days Things
have changed somewhat in this
particular, and the methods of
hunting ducks have also chang
ed. Ducks are harder to decoy,
tLey dart less frequently, and
are wary of the hunter. These
conditions have been brought
about by the increased number
of gunners, and the taking up
of almost every available place
on the flats, operating in a great
measure to scatter the ducks
and keep them on the wing.
This, in itself, however, would
not brighten wild fowl away al
together, and prevent their re-
turn, if other causes did not
exist, which have existed ever
since the advent of the gasoline
and other power craft, in pa
trolling the flats and particular
ly that portion of the bay south
of Spesutia Island, where the
ducks have found a resting
place heretofore when driven
from the flats. Now the gaso-
line boat is brought into play in
the waters below Locust Point,
and shooting from these boats
is not uncommon. Taking up a
position to the windward of a
large rank of ducks, the swift
little power boat is shot like an
arrow with the wind. This
places the ducks at a disadvan-
tage, and as they arise against
the wind, and cilcle to the right
or to the left, many fall victims
to the unerring aim of the ex-
perienced gunner. There is no
law that prohibits the shooting
of ducks from these power boats,
and the alacrity with which
they keep up their maneuvers
on the only walers where the
ducks have before found a rest
ing place, before returning to
the flats, has rendered it diff
cult for the ducks to alight, ur.
less they wing their fight to
points farther down the bay.
With the waters south of Spesu-
tia Island covered in the man
ner described, with the Susque-
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1905-07-08
Crawford Shoes for Men.
Mr.. and Mrs. Crawford have

Mr.. and Mrs. Crawford have
moved from Jefferson to saw mill
when the Windy" railroad cross
es the Sabine river, They were
Jeffersonians only for short time,
but sufficiently long to enable us
to say that they are excellent peo-
pie. Mrs. Crawford is a fine neigh
Dor. an earnest worker in the w.
G. T, U. and the church. We
wish them well, and can heartily
commend them to the people with
whom their lots are cast. Jeffer.
son will miss them.
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1905-07-08
A Flying Turtle Fell.

To the distributing a rain and
windstorm this evening, and while
watching the hail stones as they
fell very thick, a mud turtle also
fell in about three feet of my door.
steps, which was surprise to my
self and family. The turtle weighed
one pound. H. ]. WHATLEY.
July 6, '05.
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1905-07-08
RosENFELD az Co

There is an effort made to char
ter car and have an excursion to
the burning gas well. If arrange,
ments can be made we expect to
leave here Tuesdry evening and
return that night. This will be a
delightful trip at nominal cost
for ladies and children as we'll as
men. We are awaiting proper in.
formation.
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1905-07-08

Isis Continues.

After God had created man in
his own image, male and female
created He fhem," and had fin.
ished all the host of them. He
placed garden eastward in Eden
and there was no one to dress and
keep it. So out of the dust of the
earth He formed Adam who need.
ed help to perform the work of this
beautiful garden. To get this help
the Lord God took from the side
of Adam rib which he formed
into woman for helpmeet.
Sacred history does not inform
us where He placed the first man
and woman that he made previous
to the creation of Adam and Eve.
But we infer that they were the
gentiles, or the genteel people who
had nothing to do but to enjoy the
magnificent surroundings or to feast
on the delicately luscious fruits in
the garden of Eden. and to sit be-
meath the shady groves overshad-
owed by trailing vines of the cloth
of gold roses. forming lovely grot-
toes with cooling rills of limpid
water trickling down the sides OF
this enchanted retreat I infer
tua. fountains of translucent pear
ly streams were gushing forth from
whitest marble standpipes throw
ing the spray up in the air. Then
falling back upon the grass and
flowers that bedecked the sur
rounding scene. infer that these
doubly refined and intectual PEG.
pie just from the plastic hand of
God had no books but tales of love
woven by their anteriors on the
great world Jublter, while this
earth was under process or yet en-
brio l infer that these people re-
NAMED in the garden when Adam
and Eve transgressed the law OF
obedience and was fired by the
Cherubim who held the flaming
sword. l infer that the garden OF
Eden ia now the paradise or the
first heaven above this earth. And
that those pre-msntioned people
are reveling in the glorious heav.
en- of bliss far beyond. Where the
rolling tide of time floats along the
corridors of those bright orbs in the
armament of heaven, enjoying the
delicious music drawn from COLDER
harps and silver lutes by the saints
Adam and Eve might have gained
the portals of another heaven were
it not for the sins they INDUCED in
But instead they listened to the
y batteries or temptations of another
. nation which brought them dowr
grade or two lower than wher
! they first began life.
, When one starts the wrong way
y they bring upon themselves swift
,, destruction which was proven by
Cain numbering his brother Abel
Were it not for SINS that have beer
! committed by the people of thi
earth we might have had swee
communion with the spirit worlc
at anytime. But God Withdrew
+. His face from the haunts of me,
for thousands of years when wick
!, edness and sin abounded. Isis.
e Our Dress Goods Department
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1905-07-08

Cotton manufacturers in the
United States are enjoying period
of unprecedent activity. The de-
mand in Great Britain is so great
that the 635,000 looms running
are unequal to the demand. The
people of China and India are buy
ing more largely than ever. The
whole southern cotton milling field
has taken on air of great prosperity
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1905-07-08

Work is progressing slowly or
the new buildings on account o.
so much rain.
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1905-07-08
Gigantic Sale of Summer Suits-Ev-
erythlng in the House is Included.

We are determined to sell every
suit of clothes we have in the house
now. Do you need a suit? You
will save money by buying it of
P. ELDRIDGE.
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1905-07-08

Little Miss Rosalie Max was a
pleasant caller Thursday at the
JIMP. office.
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1905-07-08
Our Dress Goods Department

Is full of choice bargains, Lawns
plain and figured; Dimities. organ
dies, mousselines, etc. All OF
these goods are on sale now and
you will have a fine assortment to
select from,
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1905-07-08
Ladies, Ladies,

If you have postponed buying
your Summer Hats, do 30 no long
er, for you may now get the sea,
sons most popular styles at SOC on
the dollar
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1905-07-08

The right shoes for men,
The Packard Shoe, So, so and
$500. Sold exclusively by
RosENFELD & Co
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1905-07-08
State....-...-........-....
Expects Bale to the Acre.

w. j. G. Wiikerson was IN this
morning with some cotton blooms
which were found on his place
near Rondo. These are first that
have been brough to this season
Mr.. Wilkerson says he has twelve
acres of fine land planted in cot
ton and from half of it he expects
to gather bale to the acre, unless
some disaster befalls the crop. He
thinks crops in his neighborhood
are in fair condition, though held
back by Observation-Disclosures.
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1905-07-08
Hats! Hats! Hats!

Ladies if tbs a hat you need, why
wait any longer, when you may
purchase a seasonable one at 50e
on the dollar.
J. J, SEGAL.
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1905-07-08

The place to get your
Typewriting Paper is at
the limp. Office.
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1905-07-08
SAMPLE COPY COUPON.

Tom Watson's Maeaaine,N Mo. 121
West Agd st., Netu Yorb City.
The undersigned, reader of the I'M
PLECUTE, desires free sample copy of
Tom Watson's Magazine, as per read.
ing notice published in that newspaper
This is not an order for subscription.
Naue............ .-..--.-...."
L. O....--."
State..-..-..-...............
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1905-07-08

A. B, Hubbard has gone to Dial.
las.
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1905-07-08

See announcement of Rosenfeld
d Co.'s record breaking sale in this
issue.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1905-10-24

ers and lead clean, decent, modest
lives you will win the respect of your
neighbo,s of both races. Let each
man strive to excel his fellows only
by rendering substantial service to the
community in which he lives. The col.
ored people have many difficulties 10
pass through but these difficulties will
be surrounded If only the policy of
reason and common sense is pursued
You have made real and great prog.
ross. According to tn, census The CO...
ored people of this country pay taxes
upon something like 100000, 900 dol.
lars worth OF property, ard have blot.
led out fifty per cent of their Hitter,
acy. What you have done in the past
Is an indication of what you will b 4
able to accomplish In the futurs under
"ise leadership. Moral and industrial
| education is what Is most needed, IT.
| order that this progress may be co,I.
tinued. Your race cannot expect 10
get everything al once. II must learn
to wait and bide its time: prove it.
self worthy by showing It's possession
OF perseverance, of thrift, of self con.
troll. The destiny OF the race is chief
ly in its own hands and must be work.
ed out patiently and persistently along
these lines. Remember also that the
white man who can lie of most use to
the colored man is that colored mans
neighbor. II is the Southern people
themselves who must and can solve
the difficulties that exist In the South;
OF course what help the people of the
rest of the union can give them must
and will be gladly and cheerfully Civ
en-. The hope of advancement for the
colored man in the South lies in his
steady, common sense effort to i'm
prove his moral and material condi-
ton and TO work In harmony with the
white man in upbuilding the common
wealth. The future of the South now
depends upon the people of both races
not as races but as law abiding Amer
lean citizens.