davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
GLOBE SIGHTS
rFrom the Atchison Glob


Anything will do for a womans hat
Women call it "figure": men call it
shape.
We suppose "sylph-like form means
when one is thin enough to break IN two.
When we see some people we feel like
inventing a word that is stronger than
crank"
A well known Atchison 1oafer hash t
been doing much for several years, but ne
has quit doing that.
Next to a husband who tells his wife
all he knows. woman likes house with
plenty of closets
a white dress. I'D look like fly in the
butterrniIk,s' she says.
It is related that when certain Atehi-
son couple went on their bridal trip they
took q lunch with them
A man never SO much doubts the intelli-
gence of women as when passing the Win
dows of millinery store.
The man who is always saying he is as
good as anybody" also says great deal
about living in a free country
In dressing a child fathers will find this
a good rule: Put waist on first, and ev-
erything else buttons on to it.
There is nothing more uncertain in a
mans career than who will spend his life
insurance, unless it is what it viii be spent
Ambition dvindles away in time like a
cake of soap, and by the time = man is 70
he can, remember that he ever had any in
the tub with him.
You can always depend upon this: When
mother prays it is for the children, and
when father prays it is for himself, or the
reform of the world.
It is a good plan for every wife to kindly
let her husband get up once in the night
ground the next day for basing his de-
mand for sympathy.
We are always able to find this bright
side without looking at the map: That we
are not harnessed and left standing in the
sun, and have four legs but no hands to
keep the flies off
Every girl who has married and moved
to another town learns in course of time
how it feels to be q monarch who is de-
prived of his kingdom She is a princess
before marriage, and has the front room
upstairs She marries, moves away, her
sister next in years becomes the reignins
monarch, and when the married woman
returns home on a visit some years later,
she finds herself relegated to a back room
with her sister, the princess, on a throne
in the front room.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

LAUNCHING OF THE KANSAS.
The century line post we have recently
Since the landing of Lewis and Clark.
And a GROWING event we are nearing at
For the Kansas is soon to embark.
1t is doubtful indeed if another lone state
Ever rocked On more turbulent wave,
Or sailed the high seas of political fate
Than Kansas, the home of the brave.
Her, entrance to statehood that darkest of
dag.
How. safely she weathered the blast.
Then broke through the portals in glory
array
And reached fairhaven at last.
Right now we are nearing the crowning
event
In launching this mighty war craft.
May her records be great all energy bent
On missions of peace without graft.
Then, Hurrah! for our ship. the Kansas
by name:
May she roam the wide seas long and
well;
In peace and in war bring glory and fame
To the state where her true lovers dwell
Then when she is through with the trials
of life,
Like All Kansans she sometime must
Let US hope she may anchor in ships par
adise,
This beautiful star of the west
Russell J. Harrison.
Athol. Kan. Aug. s, 1895.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
FFrom the Chicago News.1

lETOm I1e Lineage NeWS.I
Don't cry over split milk. Call the cat.
There are also a number of fu=itives
from injustice.
All men are born equal, but the equality
doesn't hold out.
Necessity knows no law, but many
young lawyer knows necessity.
The man who has more than he needs
never has more than he wants.
No, Cordelia. marriage and happiness are
not necessarily synonymous.
A soft headed nail and hard headed
man are bots difficult to drive.
Some politicians are self-made. but most
of the candidates are maclIine-made.
A sour mash drives some men to the sa-
loon and some others to the divorce court.
Though the wisdom of the ancients may
have been superior to ours. we are still
alive
There IS a vast difference between get
ting ahead in the world and getting a.
head in q saloon
It's the twenty-fifth anniversary of her
debut into the world that is oftenest cele-
brated by a woman
Good men are seldom heard of, but the
raseaIs are always getting their names in
the police reports.
A mans Iaziness has certainly reached
the limit when he feels that 1t is too much
trouble to try to avoid trouble.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
JOURNAL ENTRIES

Why wouldn't it be a good idea to
catch the dove of peace and keep it for
a while till it lays setting of eggs
and matches out some more doves OF
peace? The supply is entirely too limit
ed at present.
Judging from the fact that Fred Du-
and two big grips when he was in
Switzerland. we presume he is taking
only his 81 varieties of assorted vests
on his European trip and has left the
balance of his wardrobe at home.
Now that Governor Hoch has provided
for Dick Blue and Farmer Smith by
making them delegates to the reciproci-
ty conference at Chicago, what, We
demand to know, is he going to do for
Bent Murdoch?
The Northern Pacific is having trou-
bic handling it's trains. Why doesn't 1t
hire some society women? They can
handle trains without a bit of trouble.
A careful perusal of the Looking
Backward department of the Topeka
Capital (Dem0 fails to disclose any
the Kelly matter.
Tom Cordry suggests that now as
Superintendent Dayhoff has been found,
the executive council should either tie a
knot in him or plug up the keyhole
News comes from the east that the
| New York apple crop is too worrny to
market. We suppose from this that the
supply of finely favored New York cider
will be very abundant the coming year.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

Parsons Sun: Speaking of the ext
aminations that have been made of
the state freasurer's Office, the Ell Do
RADIO Republican says that ~no expert
report has been made public by either
governor Colonel Murdoch is slight
~ in error in this statement Several
reports were made during the last
few months of Governor BaiIey's ad-
rninistration, but the colonel and his
friends at that time called them par
etsan reports and refused to accept
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
REFLECTIONS Of a BACHELOR
IFrom the New York Press

A girl has to be mighty pretty not to be
as Ugly as her rival says she is
The way things are kept in a girls bu-
reau drawer reminds one of the way IDEAS
are mixed IN in her head
A woman never gets over the idea that
IF she had lived abroad she would have
had a great romance with royal prince
We educate our children SO that they VIII
think they know so much more than We
do that we are only fit to go on supporting
them
There IS a good deal of consolation in
thinking you would amount to a great deal
more than You are If people who amount
to less weren't holding you down.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
us ERR0R.

The silver service for the battleship
Kansas was purchased by Governor
Hoch yesterday. : In the list of pieces
is a punch bowl which Auditor Wells
wanted to purchase but which Gov
ernor Hoch SO strenuously opposed.
After the governor saw the punch
bowl, however, he included it in the
purchase. 1t looked so different from
anything the governor had ever seen
before that he could not resist the
temptation. The governors Methodist
education had led him to believe that
a punch bowl was something used at
the training camp of a pugiiist, and
that it had no place on battleship.-
Salina Journal.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
A SMILE.

Korea is furnishing amusement for
the nations. Through Teh Moo Sin,
charge d'affaires at Washington, the
emperor warns the powers that Korea
will not be held by peace terms unless
represented The fact that Japan has
had the lid on Korea and is sitting on
it, and the further fact that Russia
would kick Japan off and jump onto
the lid if it were possible, makes the
action of the emperor quite plucky, but
very amusing. China and Korea will
stand about as much show for serious
recognition in the peace conference, as
Tom Kelly would for a third nominal
ton in the next state convention
Chanute SUM-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
HOME NEWS WHILE AWAY.

Subscribers OF the State journal
away during the summer may have
the paper mailed regularly each day
70 aHy address, at the rate of thirty
ceEHts q month. Address changed as
often as desired. While cat Of town
the State Journal will be to you like
q daily letter from home.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

With the Milwaukee grand jury
working overtime on indictments. and
with Chief Collins driving the law
breakers out of Chicago, the thugs and
grafters in the vicinity of Lake Michi-
gan are having a hard time trying to
find a place to turn more or less
honest penny,
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
A shocking Confession.

Benedict is a New Haven man who
has been eight times the father of a
bouncing bounder. In the outskirts of
the university city is little town
among the hills named Prospect, and
last year four of the children were sent
there for the summer.
One day Benedict and his wife en-
tertained at dinner a new acquaint-
ance. Prof. B. The professor is a
bachelor, and, like many scholarly
men, rather Ill at ease in society.
s'What a fine little family of chill
dren you have" he began with an adj
miring glance at the four stay-at-
homes.
Yes, indeed" replied Benedict
proudly land we have four more in
Prospect"
The professor blushed his astonish-
nent-Lippincott
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
GUARDING THE TREASURY.

Is It not funny to think how Col.
Brandon has been sitting around the
treasury at Topeka and guarding the
states money and then to learn there
wasn't a sou marked in the cash box.
There ought to have been enough left
to pay Brandon's salary but report has
it mot paid for want of funds" when
his little bill is presented.-Salina
Union.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
KANSAS CONNENT
ExnsARLE.

The only thing that can be said
against the appointment of Frank VIII
lianls, as the governors private secre-
tary is that he is CoIeman's partner.
But the partnership was formed when
there are very few young men who do
not make some mistakes.-Parsons
Sun.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

At last the Standard Oil crowd and
Mr.. Lawson are agreed. Mr.. Lawson
says the rumor about his being a
presidential candidate is a joke, and
Standard Oil is laughing long and
loudly at the humor of it.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

An exchange suggests the dreadful
idea that if Miss Tarbell keeps on
unearthing Mr.. Rockefeller's past it
may be discovered that he is eligible
to a seat in the United States senate.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

1t is gratifying to know that when
Governor Hoch gets F. L Williams in
his office he win have a real lawyer
from whom he can get advice instead
Of being compelled to go to the attor-
ney general
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

Nov that it has been proven"
says Tom Cordry, f'that Governor
Folk drinks whisky, Governor Hoch
may be expected to withdraw that
nomination for the presidency as soon
as he can secure the recognition of
the CHAIR
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

It really doesn't look just right for
a Missouri jury to soak a Kansas
United States senator and let Mis-
souri, state senator go free. And this
isn't saying anything in favor of the
Kansas man, either.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

The Hutchinson News thinks "Mr.
Stubs ought to issue another plain
statement of facts explaining how he
was able to support for denomination a
man whose methods he now SO right
eouslv deno1lnces"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
THE. INsuRANCE TRUsT.

Some people laugh when Arkansas
is mentioned, but she has sense enough
to exclude from the state any insur-
ance company that has any agreement
in rates with any other company
Mankato Advocate
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

A city official of Paterson, N. J., has
disappeared, leaving lot of debts be-
hind him. He need not think. how
ever, that he can attract attention by
any such out-of-date methods as that.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

If we can get the eye of the chair
moment we would like to move that
the Christian Scientist brother who re-
fused to accept his pension longer be
declared eligible for Carnegie hero
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
HORRORS!

1.-The thing was fixed up by Hoch.
Stubs and myself the other day, 81
was Senator Dolleys reply as to
whether or not Frank Williams had
been appointed private secretary to
the governor. Just think what a
spasm it would have caused "Hoch,
Stubs and myself two years ago if
Billy Morgan had replied to a question
as to what the governor would do
with the remark that THE thing was
fixed up by Bailey, Albaugh and my
SELF The entire boss buster gang
would have gone on another bust
Parsons Sun.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
Hong On. Hone Ever.

when 1 was q years of age" said
the seanty-haired passenger, Il thought
if I wasn't rich enough to retire at 30 I
would be too old to enjoy wealth."
how old are you now?" queried
knight of the sample case.
*Seventy-two,'' was the reply
s'And you are millionaire. i sup
pose" said the drummer.
Me- answered the old man. I'm as
poor as Jobs turkey. But I've got a
scheme to tap now that viii make Car
negfe's pile look like 30 cents by the
time 1 am rs. and then I propose to
settle down and enjoy life. Detroit
Tribune.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

James ]. Van Allen denies that he is
going to make his home in Paris in the
future. Oh, well, any old place will
do, just so he leaves America.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

d Ewing Herbert cenfesses that s'Hoch
is disappointment to most of the
men who made him governor" There
are others who didn't get what they
wanted also.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
HEREDITY,

Since Funston, pere. figured in that
picturesque street fight in lola, Kas.,
it's easy to perceive that Funston, fills.
came by his fighting blood honestly
Atlanta Constitution.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

There are almost as many lightning
rods uD for the presidential nomfna-
ton in 1908 as there are up waiting for
the senatorial lightning in Kansas in
1907.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

We wonder if Senator Morgan will
really have the nerve to say ST told
you so" when the Panama canal diff
culties come up in the next congress.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
HOW noes IT HELP?

: For a second time within a year or
SO a Chicago hotel cashier has refused
to cash Secretary Shaw's check without
his being identified. This. of course. IS
pretty good story for a dull day. and
might even bear another printing next
year, but just how it helps the secre-
taryss presidential boom is not exactly
clear to the unnoIifical nind.-Indian-
apolis News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

For some reason the Japanese
peace commissioner did not find it
necessary to deny any interview just
as soon as he had landed
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

The Washington Star has started a
boil-the-water campaign. That is a
good sort of a campaign to carry on
IN off years.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

Are there not more crimes com
United in hot weather than at any
ether time of year? Tt seems so.
Has the weather anything to do with
if2
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF TILE ASSOCIATED PRESS

The State Journal is a member of the
Associated Press and receives the full day
telegraph report of that great news or
ganixation for exclusive afternoon publ
cation In Topeka.
The news is received in the State Jour
nal building over wires for This sole pur-
pose.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
FRON OTHER PENS
THE IEKYLL STORY

What with Hyde of the Equitable
and Statistician Hyde, r. L. Stevenson
seems to have hoodooed that name
Milwaukee Sentinel.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

Germany will have to possess a big
ger navy than Britain's If she means
to establish q Monroe doctrine for the
Baltic sea.-London (Ont.) Adyer-
tiSer.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

The dove of peace ought to know
what is expected of it before long.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
LESE MAJESTY.

If you speak in disrespectful Ian
guage concerning the German sover-
eign you are guilty of Iese majesty,
and are sent to prison if in Germany.
1t is said that w. r. Stubs is going
to have a lese majesty statute passed
by the Kansas legislature so that the
fellows here can not say anything bad
about Me and Hoch," without getting
behind bars.-Lawrence Gazette.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

BY the way, when is Governor Hoch
going to enact that farce about ex-
aiming the state treasury?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
WHAT THEY SAID.

The governor of Missouri remarked
to the governor of Kansas at Dodge
City the other day: Lets put the lid
on!'-Coffeyville Record.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
WHAT WE EXPECTED

Probably Baron Koruna would look
better in Japanese eostume.-Brook-
lyn Times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
OUGHT TO KNOW.

The Topeka Capital says the talk of
prosecuting Tom Kelly, INDUCED in
by his friends, is all rot. And the
Capital ought to know. The Capital
started that talk a few years ago
Salina Journal.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
PERHAPS.

Out of evil may come some good;
when New Orleans gets over her yell
low fever attack she is likely to be the
cIeanest city in the United States
Philadelphia Inquirer.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
Mule or Sailor?

Admiral Dickins, during the sham
bombardment of For tress Monroe, smiled
one morning, as a sailor staggered past
him with a bale of hay on his back.
He makes me think" said the ad-
miral, 'of another sailor, a British one,
whom ] saw one day at Gibraltar
He, too, had a load of hay, and was
toiling with it up from the little fishing
village that lies at the foot of the great
rock. I talked with him little while,
and. as we parted, I said:
Who are you, my man? What job
do you hold here?'
well, the sailor answered, as he
took up the hay again, 7 used to con-
slider myself British bIuejaeket, but
I'm dashed If I don't begin to think I'm
a commissary mule LOS Angeles
Times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
Very SAGE Suggestion.

He was unusually tall, with an un-
usually red face, and an unusually
large nose, which was also unusually
red: and the warts on his ears and
hands were big as hazelnuts, with
smaller ones around them. while the
moles on his cheeks were almost as
large as mice.
He was well dressed. wore a smile
indicating that he was or was disposed
to be g good fellow; and, despite his
peculiarities, he looked like one to
whom the world had always been
good. Moreover, he didn't chew cloves
to hide the fact that he was indebted
to rnateria mediea for a portion of his
good nature.
There was very pretty little five
year-old girl sitting beside her twelve
year-old brother in car of a Ninth
avenue L train, in New York. and the
newcomer went over to sit beside her,
saying. pleasantly: You are as sweet
as a little wax doll, and you look like
one of the finest How old are you %
The little girl looked at him and
Rugged closer to her brother. The tall
man thought she was just a bit shy or
coquettish, and he didn't mind the re-
buff, but went on to say: Il wish
had some candy with me for you, to
want to tell how old you are. you are
only like bigger ladies' Will you tell
me what your name ISL"
She snuggled UP against her brother
ana put hef hand INSIDE or MS mltten,
and he spoke up, thus:
Say, mister, do you know much
about childfen?"
"Of course do. just dote on chill
dren.''
Il guess you don't know much about
| little girls. though, do your"
"Of course I do, and I like little
girls like your little sister. I like to
atlk with them and amuse them
well, If you knew my little sister
| just a little bit, you wouldn't want to
be talking to her here"
Eyes, 1 would, for l like all little
girls, and you oughtn't to hint that
your little sister is not nice to talk to.
''Weli, say, mister, if you don't get
away from here very quick, I'm afraid
that she will begin to talk, and if she
does, it will be too late for you
| why, she don't say bad words, does
| she %
| Mister, if you don't get away rather
| fast she'll open them eyes wide as
saucers. and then open her mouth, and
she will want to know where you got
| them warts, where that red nose comes
from, what part of the earth you
found them moles in, and a few other
things that 1 will not mention. And ii
yOu--
| But by this time, he was out on the
platform, making for the other car
Los Angeles Times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
IN THE SUMMER TIME.

If somebody could discover some
way to convert perspiration into mo-
tive power he could run the world in
weather like this-Baltimore Sun.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
Planting a City.

DR.. Heinrich c. Leonhardt, of Tona-
wanda, recently supplied almost the
August Country Life in America. AT a
dinner which he attended he heard the
suggestion made that the city needed
shade trees. Immediately he bought
thousands of young elm, maple and
chestnut trees, and as soon as it was
possible had them shipped to Tona-
wanda and stored in a nursery. The
effect was wonderful. Streets that
never would have had trees were soon
filled with f1ourishing young saplings
that in twenty years viii be prieeless-a
magnificent monument to one man.
Two thousand of the trees were distrib-
uted in an Incredibly short time There
was more tree planting in Tonawanda
this spring than ever before. The only
condition attached to the offer was that
persons taking trees should guarantee
to plant them for shade purposes and
to plant them in accordance with direc-
tions given at the nursery.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
RICH ENOUGH.

There is a dispute as to whether
John Paul Jones, Commodore Barry
or Esek Hopkins was 1.-The father of
the American navy" but it doesn't
matter much. They were all orna-
ments to the service, and the country
is rich enough to give them all fit
ting Philadelphia In
quirer.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09

Sap1eigh-Do you-aw-think it would be
wrong for me to marry a girl who was my
inferior intellectually?
Miss Cutting-No but think 1t would be
mpossible.-Chicago Daily News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-09
IARELs

There may be a scandal concerning
the labels on sides of inspected beef,
but they are not nearly so unappetizing
as the labels that we have to eat on
slices of bread.-New York Evening
Post.