Elk City mining news. (Elk City, Idaho) 1903-1913, 1905-03-04
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"You hold my future happiness. he
told the girl. why don't you hold II
yourself?" she asked, coyly.-Chicago
Post.
Experience, you know, is a good
teacher" Eyes, but l wish there were
more vacations in that school."-Chi-
cago Post.
Are your intentions toward the
widow serious" "Oh, very. am 60
ing, If possible, to get out of marry
ing her."-Life.
Tailor-Do you want padded shout.
ders, my little man? Winie-Naw.
pad de pants! OATS where l need
it most-Chicago News.
did Jerrold get anything out of biz
rich uncle's estate?" well, rather
he married the daughter of the attor.
ney for the estate."-Ex.
Boston Governess-Yes. children.
the eyes enable us to see. Now. Emer-
son, tell me what the nose is for.
Little Emerson-It's for holding eye
glasses.-Puck.
Blobbs-Have you ever had any ex-
perience with train robbers on your
travels? Slobbs-Well, I've stacked
up against good many Pullman car
porters.-Philadelphia Record.
Il don't believe bachelors have any
hearts," she said. "Why, we're Just
the men who do have them" he re-
piled. why is that?" she asked.
Because we haven't lost them"
Willie-Pa, can't l have some
Pa-See here! You've got a plateful
of food before you. Willie-Yes. sir;
but Pa-Well, keep your mouth
shut and eat it.-Philadelphia Public
Ledger.
Cannibal King-That missionary
made an awful fuss, didn't he? Head
Chief-Terrlble, sir. His struggles
were frightful. Cannibal King-WelL
serve him as piece de resistance
Town Topics.
She-But If you say you can't bear
the girl, why ever did you propose
He-Well. her people have always
been awfully good to me, and it's the
only way l could return their hospi.
tality.-Punch.
How l envy that boyr' said Smith
yes" acquiesced his friend; 1--WE all
envy sturdy youngster like that for
his youth "Oh, that's not it
He's the butchers boy, and you should
hear the way he talks to my wifep'
Come, now" said mamma, who
had taken the children for walk
through the Zoo, "let's go home and
see papa" "Oh, nor protested Elsie
lets see these other monkeys first
Philadelphia Press.
or the New York kind: would
you mind keeping that hat on" "Keer
it on! Why, l was just about to take
it off," Il: know It, But l don't
want to see any more of this play
than l can help."-Life.
Gothamite-I hear you have a Vas
sar graduate for a cook. Isn't it rath
er expensive? Harlemite-Not very
She works for her board and clothes
Gothamite-Why, how does she come
to do that? Harlemite-She's my wife
Harlem Life.
Chronic Shopper-How much are
your Baldwin apples? Fruit Vendel
Fifteen cents a quarter-peck. Chron
ic Shopper-Can't you sell me quar-
ter-peck for II cents? Fruit Vender-
Yes, but not so big quarter-peck.-
Baltimore American.
Their meeting: She Gushing ex
pectantly)-Fred Smithers, as l live
Poor fellow-it saddens me to thinl
how broken up he was over my re
fusal. He (wrinkling forehead
Where In thunder have l seen tina
woman before ?-Brooklyn Life.
Applicant 0or position as cook
How many afthernoons out durin' thu
wake, min? Mrs. Highmore-Well
of course, you can have every Thurs
day, and Applicant-Hm askin
We, min, how many afthernoons GU
ye want yersilf.-Chicago Tribune.
Hints on pronunciation: If thu
place is on the Chinese coast, remem
Der the number of your laundry ticket
multiply by six, subtract what is left
and find the puzzle. If Russian
name, add three portions, sneeze, cross
your fingers, and forget it.-New Or
leans Times-Democrat.
Towne-Hear what Sniffkins die
when the collection plate came 'roun(
to him in church last Sunday? BROWNE
No. Dropped a button in, l sup
pose. Towne-Not even that HI