Perth Amboy evening news., 1905-06-15
WON HIM HIS WIFE.

After'that big association of editors
that swooped upon Washington a few
weeks ago had transacted their bust
ness a lot of them were checking theil
baggage at the station upon the eve o
their departure from the city wheI
the battered, dilapidated, age-worn ap
pearance of the trunk of one of thu
Illinois editors came in for the guy
ing Of most of the outfit.
1T was a small, old7fashioned trunl
of the steamer variety, and it had seeI
SO much service that it required foui
heavy trunk straps to hold it together
The guying members of the party wer,
ironically talking Of making up a sub
%scription for the purpose of stalking
the owner of the old trunk to a new
one, when the Illinois editor, who tool
the chatting all in good part, cam
back at them.
That's all right about the old box.
he said to them. ITS getting prett!
old and mothtchewed, but I'm not go
ing to give 1t the shake till it fall
apart, and then I'm going to put it,
old bones away carefully and keel
them decently busted. That old DO,
won me my wife,
OF course, they demanded the stor!
of him then, and the owner of the bat
tered trunk gave it to them.
When [ first took hold of the LITTLE
weekly in my town." said the Illinois
editor, my personal effects djdn'
much more than half fill that dinky
little trunk, and when | went away
for any little trip | had to resort tc
all sorts of film ~expedients to pack
the trunk to the top so that the few
things | owned wouldn't joggle around
in the vacant space and get broken or
knocked out of shape.
But, for all Of the slenderness of
my reans and my wardrobe, the pref
tiest girl in the town, and the daugh-
ter of the most well-to-do citizen in
the place, wasn't any too good for me
to pay attention to. l used to call
upon her two or three times a week,
but was only n of about half a
dozen chaps in the town who were also
calling upon her right regularly, and
all of them were a heap better off in
this worlds goods, or, at any rate, in
prospects, than | was at that time.
Il didn't know where | stood with
the girl on this account, but | wasn't
going to be frozen out till | got the
direct word from the girl herself that
that was the program in contempla-
ton. She was pretty cordial to me,
and when | happened to find other
fellows calling upon her when | Wis
tied her home she generally let it ap-
pear, through the crafty little ways
that women pick up as soon as they
quit wearing their hair in braids, hat
she'd just as lief I'd outstay the other
fellow as not.
Anyhow, the frequency of my Wis
its and. the cordial welcome | got from
the girl aroused the jealousy of some
of the other s~uitors, and n evening
after I'd been a caller at the house
for about a year, they put up a job
me.
II was seated on a lawn bench in
front Of the girls house with her-it
was during the summer-when the
wagon of the township grocer drove up
and the driver jumped from the seat,
went to the real of the wagon, loaded
my trunk-the little battered box that
you've been guying-onto his shoulder
and walked into the yard with 1t, just
as my young lady's father came down
the front steps on his way to a lodge
meeting. My rivals had kidnapped the
from my 0 and sent it TOT
the home of the young lady, with the
idea of putting me in a foolish light
her and her father.
whats this, r inquired the old
gentleman, as the driver of the wagon,
At my command, dropped the trunk
IN the lawn.
Il asked the driver how he hap
pened to fetch the trunk to that place.
ind he confirmed my suspicious byl
me thats he had been SO In
ltrlcied 10 deliver 1t by my rivals,
1te not my fault. you see sir