West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1905-10-19


impede the growth of the crops, and
L have, whl IN is the duty OF pie
man, butted and rebutted the con.
tention of the Deacon in the Old
Family Journal with all the vigor OF
the old farm ram on the rampage.
But for some reason my butting did
not have the desired effect on the
farmers, although | butted both
prayerfully and savasely. So con
cluded to take stroll out over the
sod and examine the crops.
cit is gratifying To me to report
to your ExcellencY that found that
the crops in Preston will be four
times larger this year under the
Dawson tax laws than they have
been In former years under the old
tax laws. This is great victory
for the Machine and our tax laws.
| shall return to the Old Family
Journal and butt Deacon Brown
with renewed energy since my ar
rival from the sod and the prosper.
GUS condition of the crops. | am
happy to inform you that / am the
real Buttinskey Of our now famous
and wonderful productive tax laws.
Nothing which / have received
since my arrival in Charleston done
me so much good as Bro. Whetselps
letter. 1t has the right ring to il
and Deacon Brown will find in Bro.
Whetsell a butter that he cannot
climb the fence fast enough to
escape. / could never understand
until now why the Deacon favored
protection on the rear Of his panta
looms. He must have had an
inkling of Bro. Whetsel's butting
proclivities.
The Cuban papers which | am
receiving daily tell of the wonderful
campaign Gov. Dawson is making
In Cuba. The "Cuban Pie" the
official organ of President Palma,
in speaking of Gov. Dawson and his
tax laws, has this to say editorially:
"Until the arrival of the Great
American Tax Reformer, Gov. w.
M. o. Dawson, the outlook was
anything but encouraging for our
beloved and patriotic President
Palma. We will say now, that
which we were afraid TO utter until
the landing of the Great American
Tax Reformer, that the Insurgents,
lead by that grizzled old devil, Gen.
Jose Miguel Gomez, had us on the
run with no port in sight to take
refuge in to escape the Insurgent
storm. For the time being il looked
as though our beloved President
Palma and his devoted army of pie
men would be driven into the ocean
to meet the fate Of the historic and
patriotic Mainel After that illfated
explosion of the Maine the American
Government heard our cry for help
and nobly responded with her armies
and battIeships and rescued us from
the clutches of old Butcher Weyler!
We shall never forget the American
Government for that act of kind
ness so long as we survive and are
left in possession of the pies This
was the first Moses sent from
America to rescue us from the enc
my.
beloved Cuban piemen, today
we have the second American Moses
among us IN the person of that great
American Tax Reformer, Governor
Dawson, who liberated the farmers
of his own country from taxation
and saved the pies for himself. Like
the Good Book, which tells Us to go
preach the gospel to all Nations,
this Great American Tax Reformer
felt it was his duty to preach his tax
laws to all Nations. When our be-
loved President Palma cabled him
that the Insurgents were after our
pies he was in Canada preaching his
tax laws and making thousands Of
converts. The Canadians were so
overjoyed in the anticipation Of be-
ing freed from taxation that they
offered to make him their King !
Think of it, beloved Cuban piemen,
this Great American Tax Reformer
refuses a Kingship lie told them
with tears in his eyes that American
pie was good enough for him. The
American Governor had just gone
through a war in bis own country,
similar TO the one which is being
waged against us by the Gomez In
surgents. The appeal Of President
Palma touched a tender spot in his
pieology, for he had bsen there HIM
self and knew the exact feeling Of
our patriotic President Palma.
Gen. Teter and his Insurgents had
the American Governor partially
separated from his pies when he dis
covered his wonderful tax laws. As
soon as he made known his tax laws
TO the farmers Of his native country
they organized many armies equip
ped with what is known in that
country as Ben Tillman pitchforks.
In his history of his war with Gen.
Teter and his insurgents the Ameri
can Governor very modestlY says !:
Until ! discovered my tax laws and
equipped the farmers with Ben Till
man pitchforks Gen. Teler had me
travelling in the direction Of the tall
timber with every prospect OF losing
my pies. He had me nanked on
every side with Col. Sam Montgom
cry, Mai. Elliott and Leader Shaw
bringing up the rear. knew what