New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1905-03-18
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

CONGRESSMAN Mudd, of Maryland. tells OF bap-
tism in a village in the black belt of that State
What is the manner" asked the minister or the
chd's father.
John James George Washington Fftzhugh Lee
Blaine Harrison Smith," answered the father.
The old minister 5otted down the names and then
walking the baptismal font. crockery wash
basin, said to The janttOr; Nose. get some more
water. There amt half enough to baptise this
child If we have to take in all his names"
A Promising Pupn-Master (to youth being ex-
amned in English hstory)-With what crime was
Youth ias If By neutrality-suspicious. l9a writing
shakespeares plays.-(London Tit-Bits.
Tho United States Department of Agriculture has
added TO its memoirs food and diet report by
Messrs. Woods and Mansfield the diet OF the
Maine IumberInan. The men perform hard. manual
labor, and are much exposed to cold, wet and
hardship and the staple daily fare consists OF pork
or beef sour dough biscuits. made OF dough which
undergoes fermentation with wild yeast, tea
and moasses, and beans which are first parboiled
in the forenoon and are then packed with alternate
layers OF salt pork in pot which is covered with
hot ashes and earth and allowed to cook over night
It is considered that the dietary. regards pro-
teine and energy, is the highest yet recorded for
any American laboring man. is well digested and
costs about 23.5 cents for each person day.
Objected to the Hash.-A New Yorker at the
Palace Hotel was talking about the Drayton family
odd Captain Percival Drayton. who was Farra-
CUTS chief OF staff during the Civil War" said he
ready man-of -warsmen Of that period~the old
shellbacks. who regarded soup and bully. 'seouse
praytOn was wealthy man and , one day " ce lie.
creM to ha s casa a dinner Toward it's close
committee of old sea lawyers asked to see the cap
:" we want to thank we, SIR said the spokesman
when all had saluted. fer the elegant feed we've
attention to that ships cook sir. Just taste this
hash he's worked off on US. sir. on your bounty.
"They offered Drayton plate OF. terrapin stew
to sample "-CSan Francisco Chronicle
1.-The Cofreyviue Czan) Journal" tells a story of
the quick wit OF a Western gun artist. Bob
Chestnut had an alteration with Irishman in a
Western cattle camp many years ago. The Irish
man was bully and a bad man. While Chestnut
always brace Of six-shooters in his belt he
also carried a sudden emergency derringer in his
outside coat pocket. The Irishman had u-nch
Colt already in his hand Bob thrust his hand
in his pocket for his derrnger but the weapon had
slipped down in hole in the lining. His hand
coming in contact with his pipe he quickly drew 1t
out and placed it In his mouth. The Irishman low
cred his gun, which he had elevated when Bob
thrust his hand into his pocket. Bob reached
for his pocket again, presumably for his tobacco
Fumbling around, he secured the derringer brought
1t into play like flash of nghtning-and they car
ried the Irishman away.
Really" remarked the lazy cad, i've been won
aerng wnat 10 give up during Lent" We'll" re-
Press. III Sf'e''ar 0ocas'Onaly-(P hiladelphia
physician writes to ''The Pail Mall csazattA,. as
follows II had friend who did his duty to him
self and others with such zeal that he never went
to bed without taking his Temperature or cot
up without drinking scientific concoction the
name and composition of which have forgotten:
the flavor, however. was such as rendered tha
duty performed particularly meritorious His
dietary was based on the most scientific principles:
he weighed himself before and after each meal; he
had his appendix removed, so as to avoid all
OF appendicitis IN sbo ba
realized the duty of being healthy and long
lived that he never had time to do anything else
or talk about anything else. Unfortunately he
never took that. tickle jade. Fortune into his
calculations, and after only year OF striving most
manfuly to fulfil the duty OF being long lived he
slipped piece OF orange peel and fractured the
base OF his SKULL
mt, Mrs Bgnn-so your servant ran of. Don't you
Mrs, Hunn-Yes; because my husband ran with
Observation-Disclosures IN. H) Mirror and American
The other day laden with delicacies for the
wounded at the Russian hospitals in the East con-
triouted by women of rank in Moscow and st
Petersburg was overhauled Just before starting for
its destination. when it was found that dummy
packages were substituted for the real ones. and
all the delcacies gone. They had probably
been sold and the money pocketed by some OF the
officials. military or civil having them In charge
AS further illustration of Russian corruption the
story may be repeated OF certain Russian warshin
duty in the Behring Sea- to guard seal Ash
eries-that is to prevent the slaughter OF the fe-
male seals out OF season The admiral of the sta
ton in the course of inspection of the vessel In
vtted any of the sailors who had complaint, 20
make TO step forward One of the men as spoles-
man for the whole crew. complained that the seal
money promised them had not been paid When tha
admiral found what the complaints meant he dis
covered that the ships commander had been doing
lucrative trade by killing the seals paced undar
his protection and sending the skins TO London ana
had taken the crew into partnership.
About Time.-AIr Stoplate-D'ye know Miss CHIT
ting, I'd dearly love travel
Miss Cutting (meanngly)-WeIl why don't YOU?
cleveland Leader.