The Nezperce herald. (Nezperce, Idaho) 1900-1957, 1905-03-30
FACTS ABOUT KISSING
Japanese and South Sea Islanders Only
Nations Not 10 Indulge.

NatiDns mol 10 ihdu1kcs
Kissing is a science. q convention.
an chronological trait. and many other
things. says the London Free Lance
This Is not very clear. but those who
have endeayored 10 explain all that
uDderlies IL have written bulky vol
umes sufficient In themselves TO I'LL
the shelf Of q fair-sized library.
Mr. SqUeers educational method
was, as every student OF Dickens
knows. at once direct and unequiyo-
cal. He didn't bother about books or
professional disqHisitions. To such Of
his pupils as had an inquiring mind
on the subject his Injunction was:
Learn 10 spell IL. and then 90 and do
IL. and then you'Il know all about H."
A process which. II Mr. squecrs' pu-
pills grew Up as all other people grow
up. they would undoubtedly exploit
Al the tender period al which the adj
vice was received the trouble involved
In the spelling wss probably far great
or than the after demonstration Of the
effect.
But kissing is not always unaftsnd-
ed with danger. In the year 1881. the
year OF Queen yictor1s's accession.
Thomas savulaDd was ungalIant
enough 20 bring an action against
Miss Caroline Mention for having Bit
ten q piece out OF his nose when be
attempted TO kiss her for joke. The
Judge held that he tried 20 kiss her in
earnest and laid IL down as a definite
ruling that when q man kisses a woin-
an against her will she is fully entitled
10 bite bis nose II she pieases-"
This ruling sta nds. and 80 those who
have not yet lesrned that kissing is no
joke had better be wary Of their noses
A dictionary has defined a kiss as
"a pressure OF the mouth against the
body" but this is spiriuess. even II
accurate.
II would he just as satisfactory 10
define picture as g pressure OF paint
against canvas" II leaves untouched
the whole indefnsbie pleasure OF kiss-
ing. the fact that il is indefnable be-
ing perhaps its best excuse. as il is
Mr. squeers' justification.
Our allies, the japanese. share with
the South Sea Islanders the unique
distinction Of being the only nations 10
whom kissing is unknown IL. how
ever. the new treaty leads TO much
practical intercourse. IL is fairly GER
tain that Jack ashore On Japan VIII
teach the geisha how much they have
yet 10 learn.
IL is almost impossible 10 subcivide
the various kisses which one is obliged
TO give in ones lifetime. all Of which
are very different from the kiss one
gives ones best girl
You are bound 10 kiss your maiden
aunt or your mother-in-law or your
friends new baby. There are kisses
which you give. well. because you have
to. and kisses which you give as you
cast bread on the waters. hoping that
they Will return 10 you after as few
days as possible and not in kind
The Romans had three kinds OF kiss
es. which they termed osculs. basia
and SusVia Martial. when be return
ed 10 Rome after s few years alb
sence. was 70 deluged with ''suariz''
that be wrote furious epigrsms about
them TO stem the food OF admirers
Lieutenant Hobson. in our times. was
almost similarly overwhelmed. In the
German dictionaries there are defini-
lions OF some thirty different sorts OF
kisses. in addition 10 the world wide
-liebes kuss.- which every one. ex-
sept the laps and the South Sea Isl
apders. fan into the habit OF giving
Ind taking quite easily.
Another kiss. which one might call
he diplomatic kiss. is reserved almost
for royalties This is al
ways seized on by the illustrated pa
,ers as good pictorial copy. but the
lrtist has not yet been caught who
to invest the function with
hat ideality which would successfully
lido ITS clutnSfne><