The Montgomery advertiser., 1905-10-06

the aboYe statement: The uenBue IS not epidemic in Whistler; Mir. Smith has not had the dengue; MT. Smith is not dead in Whistler. and MT. Smith is not dead anywhere else. MT. Smith has been driving switch engine on the Meridian division for the last two
 DriftWccd l
 sY PHIL H. ARMSTRONG;.
 All Right. Madge-when he kissed you under the chin what did you do?
 Jessica-I told him he would have to look up to me.
 Pretty Punk.
 They're putting common ole stumps out to mark the limit of our taown." wall ain't that the limit?'
 Not So Had. ,,,a .old Id 1hsp,y nnp how do you like married "well, 1t Is not nearly so bad as the comic papers had led me to believe"
 Wouldn't Like Her to Dye It. Miss Gush--How do you like blonde MT. Bacheior-Blonde.
 A Help.
 Miss New York-Can you remember the names of all the men you have mar Miss Chicago-wea, there's the city directory you know.
 Our English.
 hoI ie thtnkinn nf following A stage career and becoming leading "Well how can she be following and leading at the same time."
 A Joke of the Future.
 "Vanastorbilt is getting very care "That soY'
 Yes, only yesterday he ran over nine cows and a buzzard in his airship." Family Jars.
 Have they had any family jars yet?' "Oh, yes they run over something every day in their auto" ,
 She Ought to Know.
 Polly-Jack developed a good muscle Molly-well. I'm afraid it's all gone to waist.
 Pointers.
 Never hit a duck when he is down. |" The ventriioquist gets money for not keeping his word.
 The piano mover can't always carry 8 tune.
 Plain" words do not always come A good name is rather to be chosen than great riches-that's why so many American girls marry foreigners. Every man Is, an oracle 10 some one 1t may be only his dog.
 Spare the rod and use your hand on the child. Ole Grassy Ike. Jes Crazy Ike"-dat's all de name he I knowed him well-ole Ike. he want so
 bad
 Never had no larnin 'cept .jes dat Mos any mawnin' when de sun shined out,
 He couldn't do no wuk' cept piddle 'roun'
 An maik mo trouble den air chile in town. Den he'd come knocking on de kitchen Take ofr his ole fur cap an bow down
 low. Den to de Mistiss he would bout begni; "Mawin', manin,' Mistiss, how Is your De lady's den say; "Uncle' how d
 "MeT vel; rse poly. poly chile' De misery has kotched me in de back; An thinks Q cup o' coffee, bilin' hot Would holp nah rheumatism apt ez notv' Yes, dat wuz Ike. Ole Crazy Ike, | (Want no craZiern' me or you) If-sl +, dnt Kase his skin was black, But dey's lots dats wuss'n' Ike, dat's true. l Tuh lean on Ike. Kase why, dey all had some Lil' easy errands dat he'd not forget, For pore Ike he wuz cranky" When Him he wuz ginnly talkin' to hisse'f Jabberin' on wid ev'ry. single pref. Oats why dey called him crazy" (But wuz dis: In slav'ry times dey striped An nearly crushed his skull tes kase he tried
 Tuh run away. an Ike he nearly died. ) | Said, Hello, Crazy Ike" He want no He'd ketch his bi glong overcoat an To scare 'em; den he'd laff loud at de fun. Dey all liked Ike; no mattah eff he would
 Act crazy lak an want no count-he
 could
 Be kind an lovin'-gentle wid de sick Doin' lil' errands nice an slick. | Dat wuz Ike, l Ole Crazy Ike, .--~ l Ole an pore an black az tar. But he done his bes' l Fo' his frien's l guess l To find a bettah you'd trabble far! One winter night de snow wuz fallin Jes spittin' Ill flakes sor lak on de | groun'.
 Fo down in Alabama snow do fall | Sometimes an maik de darkies shivel place ob sorrow wuz de Colonel'' home:
 Bob. his baby boy had gone to roam Dey all wuz in de paloh, dere yo know Did'n miss him tall twell long 'oou' nine
 His ma she missed him frum de crowd Den SG law. II.'' she called him; looked all roun' de place. /,.
 But no Bob. Den de men set out to tace Him froo de snow,A an walked three An by big oak tree. some black thing lay Twas Crazy Ike, froze stiff. But his big coat o.,oo,,, Wuz wrapped roun Bob, De coioner' Felt queer. Och wuz his boy. so pert an He said Boys, 1ko's in heaven safe | from harnpf