The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-09-07
WORRY THE CLERK.
WOMEN GUESTS IN HOTELS ARR
VERY TROUBLESOME.
Expect the Man with the Big Dia-
mond to Put Stamps on Their
Letters and Otherwise
Truckle.

"To the amateur student Of human
nature" observed the philosophical ho-
tel clerk. "the average woman in a ho-
tel affords rare opportunities for the in
crease Of his stock Of knowledge Of the
other sex
She rings the bell three times to
mans once. She apologies and ex-
plains so profusely to the bellboy that
the lad comes downstairs without the
least idea OF what he is to do Your lady
in hotel will indite some nine or ten
letters a day. and each envelope seems
to contain at least three sheets Of the
hotels paper. She will send the mis-
sives down. one by one, to be posted, and
each time she sends the naive message:
Ask the Office to put stamp on for me-
She never makes out a wash list, but she
Just knows what she had. and one pair
hasn't been returned. She Indignantly
refuses to confide more to the Office
when he inquiries, but she affords a
wealth Of detail that in no way helps
matters.
For some occult reason she always
regards the clerk as 'cRe Office, never re-
membering that he has feelings Just
Ne anyone else. She puts all sorts OF
things In the SAFE but she IL perfectly
sure she handed in several tangs that
weren't there. 1his makes it trilla
awkward for the Office, because he can I
provs anything, and she always Just
knows Very frequently she is thun-
derstruck by the amoHnt of her bills, and
on such occasions she likewise just
knows there is mistake. Bills are pro-
duced, but she doesn't remember receiv.
ing certain goods at all. or buying them
subsequently recollects the little trans
action and comes down to the Office tc
apologize, which makes the unfOrtun
ate clerk feel somewhat better.
"At times she becomes little con
science stricken for ringing the bell sc
often. Then she'll run out of her room
ring up the elevator boy and give hin
orders. Yet people wonder at these ele
vator disasters! As the old joke has 1t
An elevator boys life has It's ups ant
downs a truth that Is apparent enough
when we consider these additional du
ties on his part.
The lady in q hotel expects tn
chambermaid to see to this, that and tn,
other thing. She is expected to sew oI
a button here. take stitch In that, hell
hang up the gowns. and incidentally af
ford aid in getting them on. She doesn'
reflect, of course, that the poor cham
bermaid is drudge, WITH enough OF he
own work to do. and that the vigilan
eye of'the housekeeper Is ever upon hel
So the lady will say:-'Iron these out 70
me, Clara; there is good GIRL; or Lac
up these, there's DEAR or DO this 10
me. Clara; I'm leaving this afternoon
"Often our lady patron will tack pho
tos on the wall, and when she Is charge
for this little diversion she will make
terrible outcry right in the Office.
Cards and callers! Heaven send 'th
Office patience!
81 expect gentleman at about nine
she will remark. Please say am ou
II any others come show them right up
THE gentleman is late and is sent vi
Poor office!
when card awaits her she will TAX
the Office into her confidence.
"'Oh, dear; I'm SO sorry!' she e.
claims. When did he call? Oh, ye
the time Is on the card! II you ha
only told him to wait. | know didn
J leave instructions. but then. you Sc
! | had no idea he would call. ! didn
} even know ne was in town. Was II
: baby along, too? Oh, dear, I've nev'
seen the baby. II was born only la
year, and
There's no use talking, the Office hs
ito trnuhloefp