The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1905-08-27
MTRANDY ON THE
SUMMER VACATION
By Dor dthy DIX.

siveral iv thin thot. amt bald. An
shud we be itchin' to put yure faith in
somethin, be all tn gods. don't ye
niver invist amy in woman. Buy
Gr-reat Western. Balave in tn
weather Pin yure faith to amy
thing this soide iv tn tallist mountain
between anywhere an the north
pole, but don't we niver thrust amy
woman, Hennessy, FIR Oh know"
Was We liver IN love, Dooley," said
Mr.. HenneSsy.
"Oi was wanst," said Mr.. Dooley,
IAN possibly twict or foive tonnes,
but not oftiner thin thot. 1t made q
fool iv me an OF took tn Kelley cure.
'Indade," said Mr.. Hennessy, an
PLAT was thot?'
"Oi married Missis Dooley,' said
Mr.. Dooley, IAN got doom to tn stern
realities iv loife, lawn tn clouds ~
romance an tn hivinly drames iV me
irridescint youth in tn rear. Me first
love was tn Dist wan iv thin all.
Sometimes whin OF hev' persuaded tn
household to shape and told Missis
DooIey thot tn cellar door was locked,
tn kitchin windows fashioned, tn
back door bolted an barred, an tho,
Oh wud git dhrunk if she asst amy
more QUESTIONS iv me-, Oh sit doom on
me piazza with me poipe upsoide dool
an bark back TO tn days whin Bridgit
an OF was gallvinatin along loife's
easy streets. Oh ust to take me heart
IN me hands to kape it frum chokin
me an shteal up to tn church on
prayermeetin nights to take me
darlint home. Oh memorized elikent
spiel to git oft on tn way home an
whin she came out OF ghrabbed ner
ar-rum an. bejabbers, it was divil
wurrd OF could git out iv me mouth
till we got to tn gate, an Oh cuu
only shtammer, Goodnoight an tip
me hat shtiffly. Thin OF Wud lay
awake half tn noight an erict wan iV
tn foinist risidinces in tn town. Oh
was in love, Hennessy, an Oh got
wurrse. Oh blushed whin Oh see her
an she blushed whin she see me.
Finly OF cud shtand it no longer an
Oi took to dhrink. Thin me affairs
de couer gravitated into a corn liquor
romance an me Bridigit gimme tn
CONCEALED ripper. OF shook me fist a.
tn wurrld an OF said. 'Gwan loif",
gwan ambition, gWan iVerythlng. 1e
ARE all false an tn whole is domn
loie OF balave in nawthin'. Me loife
is blarsted an Oh druther be billy
goat ateing esther cans an shoe heels
thin to be prisidint without me Bridgit.
Afther a whole me Dyes fingered on
anurther lass. Thin anurrther an -
am hanged if Oh ramimber thin all.
But none iv thin was loike Bridglt
except that they would fool We. Oh
loved Bridgit's mither an Oh loved
her goat an OF loved her WasherWo-
man. Thin me loife was splashed on
a silk CANVASS an in colors iv tn
sunset. OF reached up an snatched
hivin down an toied it to tn earth.
OF poured out me soul in little rivulits
an flowers shprung up along TN
banks. Doom in me heart an along
tn sympathetic mimbrances there was
a vernal equinox iv fifteen koinds ~
emotion an twinty swim iV other
things. Oh lived amang tn shtars an
fioated in a balloon manufactured "
ineffable joy. TIL twitter iv tn
Inglish sparruws woke echoes
in me throax an OF sang iv tn
DOOLEY-TWO g'uee,,r 7S9Us.. %
pure joys iv Twin. Whin OF bark
back to thin days, Hennessy. me
wurrld- hardened soul softens an me
Dyes git moist an tn gone feelin' skips
over me till Missis Dooley, shticks
head out iv tn door an says, Ye
spaleen, ar-re We yez daft, IN why
don't We come out iv noight air.
Missis Dooley wud knock tn romance
out l. a doime novil.
"Yis. Hennessy, OF hev' been in love
Oh hev' he'd siveral cases iv it, an amy
wan iv thin devastated me Systim
more thin cholery or yellow fever wud
Oh Shud ruTther hev' Shmall poX amy
day or be vaccinated. TIL ifficts iv
me love affairs is shtill apparent on
me loife OF lost tn value iv money
whole Oh was mOonin'. Oh got care
iss iv business, an SIGH earth earthly
things Oh shtammered and shutter
ed an cud niver say tn thing thot OF
wanted to say an always shpoke whin
Oh he'd me mouth shut. An thin me
loss iv me Bridgit, shure, Hennessy Oh
wud hev' been prisdint but FIR thot.
But OF am glad it is over OF Wudn't
so through with it again.
"Shure." said Mr.. Hennessy; its a
great pithy thot whin We fell in love
We cudn't hev' shtayed out iv it.
'Indade, an it is" said Mr.. Dooley;
we ar-re roight. Oh thought iv it an
Oh thried to do it. Shud Missis Doc
ley fall gintly to shape an Oh shud
fall in again OF shall profit be Me tx
perience an Oh shall shtay out, an OF
will"