davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14
UMBRELLAS AS PROPERTY

Startling indeed is the news of recent court de-
cison in Boston and full of strange possibilities In
the city of beans and blue stockings a learned Judge
has just tried convicted and fined $40 John Urgen-
sen whose sole offensef ofense it can be caled-was
to take steal and carry away sundry personal prop
erty-to wit, one umbrella" And the fine was paid
Now since umbrellas they have been stolen
They have been particularly choice morse for all
of kleptomaniacal tendencies. They have never been
considered safe unless chained down. Seemingly no
property right vested in them. Ones dog might be
puroined and provided caught the thief one might
recover in a court of law Ones hat, even possessed
tangible value. But umbrella!
Why, umbrella is legitimate object of mirth. The
jokesmth counts 1t Of his rghtful accessories
of trade and its loss at the hands of another has been
a standing subject of trade and barter while all the
changes conceivable by mercenary mind have been
Iung on II for ages. Public houses put up signs dis
claiming responsibility for it and locks and keys are
provided for its safe keeping
But learned judge hath declared that umbrellas
property and their theft may be for Yet
if all who lose their parasols in this word-and who
has not at time other?-rush to court therefor
will not litigation be multiplied that Justice will do
naugh seek to punish umbrella abstractors for
the rest of her days?
Has not this Boston juris opened up alarming
vista? And is it worth while after all?
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

80 many cars are now handled by the Pacific Electric
company from its terminal station that human beings
are no longer able to announce them and machinery win
De Installed for that purpose the megaphone PROV
ing inadequate Los Angeles has the finest and most
complete trolley interurban system on EARTH and yet
this Is only one branch OF IT,
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

Don't ever say again that the smart set is inconss
tent Mrs. Fish sold fish at charity bazaar-goldfsh
at that. And Harry Lehr raf1ed the donkey!
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

Still lots of families with than two boys are
reared less than $1O0 month-though often papa's
pants made to fit Willie to do it.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

No one notices Taft holding down any lids in the
orient He is there enjoy the fun and is having all
his ponderosity permits.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

Now another sensational autost is laid up for re-
pairs The speed bacillus to have emulated the
historic worm and to have turned When these experts
cannot run machines safely what can be expected of
mere amateurs?
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

The naked Doukhobors of Manitoba are again on
pilgrimage. No, they are not seeking the "bac1to-
nature"-ites of Pasadena
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

The Chinese boycott of American products as re-
ported by officials of the state department Washing
ton, is simply scheme worked in China 'by student
organizations for political purposes" There
been any real danger that Chinese merchants would
work a boycott to their own disadvantage.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

If it keeps on Teddy will have to saw up that big
stick and construct cabinet of -unIess it is worn
to shingle clearing out the present ones scandals
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

Among other knocks Senator Mitchell it is related
that he has French duke sonin-aw. Perhaps he
needed the money"
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

Secretary Wilson will not take vacation this year
Things in the agricultural department must be worse
than the public kens.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

President Roosevelt has no desire to emulate one
McGinty of classic memory He will let the other fellow
go down in the submarine while he stands ON the shore
and listens to its gurge. There difference between
buckng bronco dry land and crazy boat under The
water 1t seems
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

Conservative heads of the order figure that 1000 N
10000 shrners will visit Los Angeles next May for their
annual convention. This will something like so 600
visitors all told attracted by the Mobiles and La Fiesta
Certainly the call for funds for their entertainment
should meet with most liberal response.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

A stranger staying at prominent hotel in the city
related In the police court novel experience in at
tempting to stop the saloon business He started ont
determined, as he said to drink all the whisky in
town" The spirit willing but the flesh was weak
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

The head of the greatest life insurance company in
England-one against which no word of scandal has
ever been breathed-is paid only 5000 year salary
Comments? What's the use? ~. -@
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

The report that the Hon. Hinky Dnlk touring Europe
as the fit type and representative of the Chicago coun
cil has disguised himself is denounced base canard
He only took off his horse blanket wes because of tho
heat.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

c. M. schwab is going to Europe to learn shipbuild
ing In view of the he made of the shipbuilding
trust he needs the schooling. Perhaps he'll begin by
"Schwab-bing" down the decks
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

In view of the hitch at Portsmouth, perhaps Oyama
will have to put the to Linevch again. just as
gentle hint
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

Capt. Shea deputy Cupid, lost the key to the matr
monial situation yesterday What dire catastrophe
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

The telegraphers the northern railroads who
struck hustling for jobs-pulling wires, one
might say.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

Even misfortune works for John DIS ends 1t take
kerosene to kill the mosquitoes that propagate yellow
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

France is to investigate the affairs Of the Equitable
and after that Cambon dinner too! The unkndest cut
of all.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

Mrs. Chadwick's creditors will get mills on tn
dollar. They not steel mills, either-only stolen.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

Serge" witte has the blues over the peace
Case of "blue SERGE" as it were.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14
Population Of Los Angeles 2OI.249

And now, after all the puns. they pronounce
"vittel"
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

But why discuss the taint Russell sages money?
He isn't offering it to anyone
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

Mosquitoes are eating up the ENJOYS One American
product neither side will want to put the free list
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

Now allegations made of graft in the weather
bureau department Eastern people will be inclined to
believe the reports and to conclude that grating ac-
counts for the wretched quality weather the bureau
has been handing out to them this year.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14
Pi-lineS and Pick-upS
HIa Own 2. z.


OF "Frenzied Finance" Lawson's writ
with vitriolic pen,
And then about the country toured and
told It all again;
THE System" he has roasted long and
often in the press;
That he would up against It be, who ever
now would guess2
But Lawson now is studying financial
rudments,
Confronted with a situation that is just
immense;
Frenzied he is beyond compare-hls hearts
blood he must shed,
For Lawson has daughter and the
daughter soon will wedl
What hath "Amalgamated" held in woe
or in expense,
Compared unto the tax that he will pay
for these events7
Trousseaux to buy. and priests to pay and
all the resti A trance
Tom Lawsons in, because of this new
born Frenzied Financel
An ocean liner last week brought over
100 babies One continual "squawl' all
the way.
The countrys real mosquito fleet seems
to belong to the Marine Hospital rather
than the navy department.
Mr.. Plum-I have only seen two pretty
women here.
Miss Peach-who's the other?
late summer drink is called the ST.
berian bloodhound. 1t is very cooling
sends cold shivers down your spine. And
1t needs no chaser.
Komura's olive branch seems to De
Witte to be a good sized club.
Chicago papers publish bulletins every
day telling which city water is fit to
drink. Why, when no one drinks water
there?
And 1t was called the Depew Improve
ment" companyl
It's the man with "all kinds of money
who usually has some of the tainted va
riety.
Mr.. Prune-I, sir, am self-made man!
Mr.. Orange-Yes, you look it-even home
made!
The south's color line seems to be yellow
just now.
An eastern circus headed this way has
it's cars named for noted scenic spots.
The diner, doubtless, is called 1.-THE Royal
Gorge"
The wild story comes from Missouri of
tramp begging for soap Kohoka is the
town. "Show u.s."
However. brevity doesn't seem to be the
soul of Witte, judging.by his volubility
What is now wanted is the shot-proof
,,to fire
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14
Steamship Line

No definite plan for the steamship
line has been agreed upon yet, because
the organization of the company for
that purpose depends upon the sue
cess of the floating exposition" But
it was stated yesterday that it had
been informally discussed and the gen
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

What is now wanted is the shot-proof
auto tire.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

However. brevity doesn't seem to be the
soul of Witte, judging.by his volubility.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-08-14

The Herald's circulation In the city Of Los Angeles
b larger than that Of the Examiner or the Express
and second only to that of the Times.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1905-07-22

Inc saints have no fewer than 397
.uee0 named in their honor in Lon
oon. There are 1O5 Church streets.
nIty-nx Chapel streets, sixty-six King
streets, one hundred Queen streets.
ana nearly AZ many High streets. II
letter were addressed to one Of these
without further definition it might take
some months before it would reach
the address.
Recent experiments by Berthelot
snow that the nerves Of smell are so
sensitive that the odor Of iodoform can
De recognized in quantities as small as
the one hundred billionth of a gram. In
such case the odor was distinct. al
though hundreds Of years would be re-
CURED Tor the substance to lose a thou
sandth part of its weight. This indi.
Gates that the delicacy Of the nerves Of
smell In detecting the presence of min
ute quantities Of emanation is of the
same order as that of the spectroscope:
ana for this reason Berthelot calls at
IGNITION to the risk Of inferring from
spectroscopic examination the change
o. one element into another. The spec
tral lines OF one element might appear
In the spectrum of another, owing to
the presence of an infinitestinal impur.
ity.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1905-07-22

Prince Gustaf Adolf Of Sweden and
Princess Margaret of Connaught, who
were married recently at Windsor,
England, are said to be lovers in the
truest sense Of the word. Prince Gus
tat Adolf is the eldest son of Crown
Prince Gustaf, and hence is the heir
presumptive to the Swedish throne. He
was born Nov. II, 1882 and bears the
title of Duke of Scania. His full name
is Oscar William Frederic Olaf Gustaf
Adolf. He is soldier, and has two
brothers. Princess Margaret is the eld-
est child Of Prince Arthur, Duke Of
Connaught, and was born Jan. Is, 1882.
Her full name is Margaret Victoria.
She has brother aged %, and sister
10 years old. Her uncle, King Edward
VII, bestowed on her the nickname Of
Daisy" and she seldom Is called by
any other name in the royal family cir
Gle. Princess Margaret is tall, healthy
and handsome, and loves fun and
amusement
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1905-07-22

40 TIE real perOratiOn of his
sermon. - ni'
"nen the dor is opened on selfish
ness love die on the threshold.
80 long as truth lives it will grow
ana outgrow all the clothes I'VE MAKE
for it. 'A'
Inc pursuit Of money is painful bnt
its possession is often more so.
mere may be more spirituality in 3
Dowi OF soup than in a sermon.
The 1nfidel bowls at the Bible mir
acies, but he aims at its morals.
There's no power in the piety tina,
seems to give a man a perfect pain.
When the church is frozen with for
mailsm it needs more than fires of elo
quence.
NO man ever suffered much for hi.
opinions until they got down below
his collar.
NO matter how hurried you may be
no time is ever wasted that Is spent II
gratitude.
Preaching dogmas is fighting the
devil with the scabbard instead of with
the sword.
The fruitful lives are the ones thai
SOW seeds of gratitude in the burrows
of affection.
Men who couldn't organize a peanut
stand know just how the pastor should
run the church.
The devil is exceedingly solicitous
lest the church acquire a reputation
for undue activity.
Many people see their children grow
up while they are planning on begin
ming to train them.
The models of fashion here cannot
even be certain of passing muster a.
dOor-mats in heaven.
1t takes as much grace to make 9
saint out of Pharisee as it does t.
make one out of publican.
The modern idolator falls down be
fore the work of his own Imagination
instead Of that Of his hands.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1905-07-22
A SORT OF HoRsEwnIPPlNG.

The rod, the sparing of which spofls
the child, need not Of necessity be
made of the time-honored hickory, as
is shown in an anecdote related by the
Washington Star. An old man, who
in his boyhood received the chastise-
ment tells the story. He says it was
the worst fogging he ever had, and
that the instrument by which his faith
er administered 1t was the sharpest-
backed, hardest rotting, most awk.
ward old horse ever seen.
Iwon't say that the punishment was
undeserved, and I know it cured my
propensity for mischief. l lived then
some three miles from the postof1ce,
and eight miles from friend OF ours
who had sold father pig to be deliv'
cred when convenient.
One day, when I was at the post
Office with neighbor's boy, this friend
came riding down the road, and tying
his horse, deposited the bag containing
the pig near by. He was accompanied
by q miserable looking cur, which sat
down by the bag while his owner went
into the office. Quick as a wink, we
caught the dog and substituted him
for the pig. We placed the pig IN q
pen not far off; then we scurried home
We were hanging around the yard
when the man with the bag rode up
Handing father the bag, he dismount-
ed just as the string was loosened and
the dog jumped out.
81 declarev exclaimed the man
'sThat dog was a pig when ] left home
I put It into the bag myself"
We boys were little way on. and
father shouted to me, where have you
been"
"To the store" said l.
Ibid you see this bag"
eyes," I acknowledged.
"Who changed the pig for the dogT
he demanded.
I'll did," faltered.
It was a little past supper-tme ano
I was hungry, and I hoped fathero
fog me and have it over with. bu'
that wasn't his way. he just spoke up
quiet like:
"Get out Old Rocks, put bride on
but no saddle, do You mind. not even
: bag. Take the dog back to its own
er's house, then ride to the postofHce'
get the pig and bring it here. NO sup
per for you tonight young man.
or / started, and do what could.
Old Rocks kept up his hard not until
I got back, at nearly midnight l rooe
in all about sixteen miles, ana you pet.
ter believe was SO pounded ana cur
by that razor backed old horse tnat
didn't miss not being whipped. For 9
week upright or horizontal posluon.
suited me best, and whatever miscnel
I aferward engaged In. you may De
.ure involved neither pigs nor dogs.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1905-07-22
Pineapple Cu.tard.

Make smooth three tablespoonful
OF hour with one Of butter and stir into
quart OF boiling milk. Have ready
the beaten yolks of eight eggs, add to
them two-thirds of cupful of sugar
and turn into the milk, stirring con-
stantly for three minutes; add, when
cold, a cupful of chopped pineapple
and four tablespoonfuls of lemon juice.
Cover with a meringue Of the whites
OF the eggs and four dessertspoonfuls
OF powdered sugar. Brown lightly In
the oven.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1905-07-22
Deviled Eggs.

Boil eight eggs hard, then throw into
cold water to loosen the shells. Re
move the shells, cut each egg carefully
In half and take out the yolks. Make
paste Of the yolks, a little melted
butter, half teaspoonful of chill
sauce and salt, pepper and mustard to
taste. With the hands form this mix.
tire into small balls. Replace this be-
tween the halved whites and run q
thin toothpick from end to end Of the
eggs to hold them in place.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1905-07-22
STEPPING OUT SASSY"
First Step Toward Success 10 Prope
Self Confidence.

First Step Toward Success 10 Proper
6e1f-Confidence.
For generations the Randolph Jefer-
sons had been celebrated for the beau
ty and charm of their women. Betty
Jefferson had been declared the most
beautiful woman at the Governors ball,
and Betty's daughter had been the
belle Of three counties, and Betty's
granddaughters - three Of them at
least-claimed the family reputation Is
matter of course. The fourth one,
Virginia, was different. She was plain
and shy and awkward. The Jefersons
always looked puzzled when they
thought Of her-a homely Jefferson
was such a strange m1sfit.
So Virginia lived her shy, lonely life,
an alien among her own people. Yet
she was not quite alone either. One
friend she had, old Aunt Charlotte,
who fought desperately to make the
girl conquer her fate instead Of yield
ing to it.
"'Tain't yo' 'pearance, Miss Fagin-
n.y." she urged, day in and day out;
hits jes' cause yo' lows things ter
tromple on yo'. Hop up yo' haid,
honey, an step out sassy. Dat'll fotch
'em ev'ry time"
While Virginia was still young girl
the war swept over the South. For a
few years the family contrived to keep
together, but at last it was necessary
for them to separate, and Virginia
went to cousins in Philadelphia, who
were confident that they could help her
to music pupils. The weeks that fol-
lowed were crowded with agony for
the homesick girl. If she had been
shy at home, she was thousand times
worse facing strangers. It was not
strange that only failure followed her
efforts.
One day she went to SEQ Mrs. Dens-
more, who had three little daughters,
for whom she wanted q music teacher.
For various reasons Virginia really
hoped for success there, but the result
was the usual polite regret. The girls
eyes filed with tears, and she bowed
silently; then suddenly, to the lady's
surprise, she began to laugh nervous
~.
IL beg your pardon" she STAN
mered, meeting the look in the others
face. II was just thinking Of the ad-
vice of my old nanny at home
'Hop up yo' haid an step out sassy I
suppose ought to have thought Of
that at first"
To Virginia's amazement, Mrs. Dens-
more turned and motioned her back to
her seat.
IF you don't mind, Miss ]. erson."
she said, 1--WE will talk this over q lit
tie more. To tell you the truth, 1t was
your evident lack Of self-confldence
that made me distrust your ability to
teach; but II you can step out sassy"
and ten minutes later Virginia left
with her first pupils secured.
Many years after she told the story.
and declared 1t the turning-point OF
her life. II learned" she said, that
the first step toward success II to learn
to .hor up 20 haid.' YOUTHS Com
pauton.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1905-07-22
Railway Rate Legislation

K0buWOy NObS A~8sSs0ssOss
At the bienniahl convention Of the
Order of Railway Conductors recently
held at Portland, Oregon, resolutions
were unanimously adopted voicing their
sentiments as to the effect of proposed
railway rate legislation on the $780,
600 railroad employees, whom they in
part represented. These resolutions
endorse the attitude of President
Roosevelt in condemning secret rebates
and other illegalities, and commend
the attitude of the heads of American
railways, who, with practical unanim-
ity, have joined with the president on
this question" They then respectfully
point out to congress the ''inadvisabil-
ity of legislation vesting in the hands
of a commission power over railway
rates, now lower by far in the United
States than in any other country" be-
cause such legislation would result
in litigation and confusion and newt
ably tend to an enforced reduction in
rates. irrespective of the question Of
the ability of the railroads to stand
the reduction, especially in view OF
the increased cost of their supplies and
Materials They further protested
against such power being given to the
present interstate commerce commits
sion because s'the proposed Liquidation
is not in harmony with our idea OF
American Jurisprudence. inasmuch as
it contemplates that q single body shall
have the right to investigate. indict,
try. condemn and then enforcre its de-
eisions at the cost of the carriers, pend
ing appeal, which is manifestly in
equitable"
The conductors base their demand
for only such legislation. il any, as
would 'ssecure and insure Justice ana
equity and preserve equal rights to all
narties concerned" on the ground that
the low cost Of transportation lis the
reeult Of the efficiency Of American
railway management and operation
which have built mp the country
through constant improvements AND ae-
velopment Of territory, while ct the
same time recognition has BEEN given
70 the value Of intelligence among en-
Moves in contrast to foreign methods,
whore high freight rates and lowest
wages 70 employees obtain.
In pressing their cliam against leg
islation adverse to their interests, tney
noint out tho fact that tho freight
- az this country average only two
49, cant az the coet Of articles 70 the
xs-.m-.r <hus making the freight rata
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1905-07-22
Soda Cake.

Soda Cake.
One pound -four, one-Quarter pound
butter, one-half pound sugar, two eggs,
one ounce candied lemon peel, one tea
spoonful carbonate of soda. Mix -four
and soda, rub in butter, beat up and
add eggs, peel and sugar, lastly the
milk. Put in creased tin and bake
ut once in a quick oven first then
moderately, about one hour.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1905-07-22


Cured by Three Bottles of Peruna!
Can't. W. W. Jackson, 7G5 G St., N
Washington, D. c., writes:
81 am eighty-three years old, vet
srap of the Black Hawk, Mexican and
tbe Civil wars. l am by profession a
nbysican, but abandoned the same.
Some years ago was seriously af.
fodpd with oatsrrh of the stomach. Ny
.dferings we're protracted and severe.
tried every known remedy without obtain
Ing relief.
"In desperation began the use of your
Peruna. began to realize immediate
though gradual improvement.
after the use of three bottles every
appearance of my complaint was re-
moved, and l have no hesitation in rec
ommending it as an infallible remedy
for that disorder. Nv. w. jackson.
Address DR.. S. B. Hartman, Presi-
den! Of The Hartman Sanitarium, Co.
lumbus, Ohio.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1905-07-22
Lettuce Sandwiches,

Delicious for afternoon tea. Take
The yoke Of four hard boiled eggs
pass them through a sieve, then mix
Wlth little butter, teaspoonful OF
vinegar, also little tarragon and chill
vinegar and little salt. Mix this to
paste, then spread on both sides OF
min slices of bread; place the nice
green part Of fresh lettuce leaves ON
o0th sides. Cut into neat square OF
0ngshaped sandwiches.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1905-07-22

Stepnen r-nHnps Is about to under
take the rehabilitation of the charac-
ter OF Nero, in cheerful confidence
that he will be able to give quite
olHerent presentation Of Nero from
mat usually made. Mr.. Phillips re-
CARDS the tyrant Of odious memory as
an aesthetic placed in a position Of
omnipOtence.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1905-07-22

Sir waiter SCOTS autograph manu-
script Of ''The Bonnets O. Bonnie Dun
Dee" as originally written in ten
verses OF eight lines each, has just
been sold In London for $40. The song
was introduced is the drama of 1.-THE
Doom Of Devorgoil," and was written
at Christmas, 1925.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1905-07-22

There II this much about IN engage
ment: the girl win not admit II, but
she has feoling from the start that
hs might have spent more o tie enr
eagoment ring.