The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1905-01-07
DONALDsONvILLE, SATURDAY, T. 1906
THE OFFICE BOY WANTS TO KNOW

IN sunday scnQol.
or look pretty in print?
How many times you looked alive
And dated your letters nineteen five?
how many times You got dead sore
10 md out you d written it nineteen four?
II you ever thought mean enough of
The Office Boy to imagine he'd drop
into poetry?
How many swear-offs you swore on
New Years?
Whether they weren't the same old
things you swore of last year?
and if you won't swear 'em OFF
again next year?
and the year after that?
and SO on to the end of the chap
ter?
If you hadn't better be off with the
old sWears before you are on with the
new?
and swear off swearing off?
II there's any accounting for some
peoples funny tastes?
and other peoples curious notions?
and particularly those of the piny
woods editor over at Greensburg?
who says he reads The Office Boy
column in The Chief before he does
the New Orleans morning papers that
come by the same mail?
and finds it a. heap more inter-
esting than some part OF the scrip
lures?
the first chapter of Genesis, for
instance?
Why Capt. Harry doesn't sit for his
own picture once?
STEAD of getting some cookbook
ing Jung fellow to do it for him?
Il anybody takes stock in the coal
black slander thatthe coal firm wanted
him to take the saltwater trip because
he was too fresh?
Whether he's likely to repudiate
both the Democratic and Republican
tickets next election and run on the In
dependent?
If there wasn't more than one heavy
swell in evidence when Harry and the
tug rounded Cape Hatteras?
II the sea was the only swell on the
beach?
# none but the braves deserved the
fair?
Whether either they or the fair de-
served the weather they got?
Whether the weather wasn't unfair
to the fair?
What the Injuns and the town are
going to do with all that money?
If anybody ever will know how
much the fair people made?
If calculation as to how much they
didn't make isn't a sight easier propo-
sition?
II it isn't self-evidenb that our Red
Men are outclassed il their own color
line by our red women?
What kind Of a red holy show the
carmine braves would have made
alongside the pretty red bunch at last
weeks german?
Whether it wouldn't have suggested
basketful of overdone Holsters try
ing to compete with wagon-load 'of
rosy-ripe peaches?
How green the Reuben must have
been who thought that a red german
was afreshly-arriyed Dutch immigrant?
If Clarence's naval training won't
stand him in good stead in his new
cruising ground?
Whether the knowledge Of the
science Of navigation aeduired on
Uncle Sans gunboats won't enable
him to steer q niger and mule
across the Ascension fields as
straight as rams horn?
Why the man behind the gun
shouldn't be an albright fellow be-
hind the plow as well?
Why the successful commander of a
boats crew can't be just as good at
bossing a eane-carsload OF dagoes?
II Caleb has taken out a license?
When he is going to open his jew
elry store?
What indeed him to forsake law
and branch out as jewelry buyer?
What ha did with the magnificent
diamond locket he acquired for the
paltry sum OF two simoleons?
and the beautiful ring he was
flashing a couple OF weeks agos
If the man who sold him the locket
ever heard Of P. T. Barnnn's eele-
brated remark
II it's true the vendor was heard
to naurnar to himself after the sale
was eonsummated, tits shame TO
take the money?
Il Warren has found out yet what
caused that barrel to decrease in
weight?
If he isn't entitled to know after
having eoughed up two fifty for q les
son?
Why he doesn't ask the express
agent in New Orleans TO come across
with an explanation?
ia little matter like fifty or sixty
pounds can be expected to cut much
figure with the Pacific Express Com
pany?
t there was ever a likelier subject
for investigation BY the railroad COM
mission than this same Pacific Ex-