Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1905-08-26

"A horse that is fast walker
does not have to trot so much. Did
our DOys ever notice that9 Well, it
is much the same with boys. A
boy who walks right up to and with
his work-keeps abreast with his
duties has a much more pleasant
time than the boy who is always
tagging to the rear. A boy must in
some shape or other, do his share.
and if he persists in poking along
whenever the eye of the instructor
is on something else, he must be
made to trot to catch up with the
fast, even walker who finds his
work easy and pleasant because he
never allows it to get ahead of him.
Take lot of boys together and the
fellow who tries to. do the least has
much the hardest time Of any. The
boy who has the easiest time is the
one who peels off hislcoat and starts
right in with the determination of
dong well and promptly the work
that is assigned to him to do.
1t makes fellow feel exhaust
ed to read the spew of those va
cant-skulled nimishes who 1nhabit
the offices of the Chicago dail1es and
eternally try to get off something
brilliant in ridicule of the home
locals in the country newspapers.
These butter-milk- Drained non.
compuses think it mighty funny if
they read in country paper that
HIT. Urnell has sold his Jersey cow
to B. V. D. Daleman. But of course
the proper caper comes when they
say in their dignihed daily that Mrs.
Audubon Gushwillicus Montague
has Just returned from the Madison
Square bench show, where she pur-
chased pure strain Boston terrier.
That's immense-that is! Mrs. Mon
tagues Boston bull pup would bring
about thirty cents in en average
dog pound, while Urnell's COW would
sell for $50 in the dark anywheres.
They turn up their smellers if a
country paper mentions that Gus
Perry and Sarah Bates enjoyed Fri
day evening at the opera house, but
if Montgomery Ward, the society
bellwether, and Cordella Adelina
Searsbuck, the moneybag heiress,
take some of their mogul friends to
the theater the daily paper wobble-
heads will call it box party and
slobber more than half column
about it besides displaying pictures
of all in the bunch. A different
emetic is not needed.
Wisconsin veterans who will
participate in the national encamp-
ment of the Grand Army of the
Republic at Denver this year will
cooperate with a number of sister
states in the creation of new Office
n Il Q officiary of the Grand Army
from the national encampment
down. The new officer is to be a
patriotic instructor, to have charge
of the patriotic instruction in con
nection with the schools of our
country. The plan is to create the
office in the national encampment.
in the departments and in the local
posts SO that his labors will be con-
tinuous and extend ffom the local
field into the national.
"A young man asked an elderly
farmer for his daughter in mar
riage. The answer was: go into the
orchard and bring in a parcel of
apples. Give me out half of the
whole number and to the mother
one-half of the balance and half an
apple over, and to the daughter
one-half Of the remainder and half
an apple over, and have one left for
yourself without cutting an apple.
Then if she is willing, you can
have her. He solved the problem,
and how many did he bring?