Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1905-06-02
JUST FOR FUN

Stella-Jack said I was the eternal
feminine. Bella--How mean Of him to
refer to your age.--BrookIyn Life.
she-I'm thinking of changing my
name. What would you suggest? He
Mine. She-All right--Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
Gracye-Maude asked George to kiss
her. Gladys-Well, like her cheek!
Gracye-So did George.-Louisyille
Courier-J Journal.
He-Why have you nicknamed your
dog circumstances" She Because
| have absolutely no control over him.
Detroit Free Press.
Miss Pert-Which half is 1t that
l1oesn't know how the other half lives?
Miss Canstique-The better half
Philadelphia Record.
Brother-You can't think how nery-
GUS was when proposed. Sister
You can't think how nervous she was
until you did.-Town and Country.
Jack-Why do you girls spend so
much time and money on dress? Nell
(candidly)-To interest the men and
worry other girls.-Philadelphia Press.
Nip-What was the greatest luck
you ever had hunting? Tuck-Once
when fellow shot at me In mistake
for a deer and missed me.-Philadel-
phia Record.
well, this is put-up job. all
right" said the man, as he struggled
lnder his wife's direction, to hang the
pictures on the parlor Whatsoever
vile Journal.
Dashaway-Tm afraid III never get
my ring back from that Piper girl.
cleverton--Why, thought she was a
peach. Dashaway-She is-clingstone
yariety.-Judge.
THAT Mrs. Giltedge is awfully
proud" "How SOL" why, her father
tried to advise her and she wouldn't
nave 1t because advice is cheap"
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
why does that Congressman say so
many more clever things than the rest
Of us?" He is shrewd enough to pick
3ut the brightest reporters to interview
him Washington Star.
victim-Help! Policel am being
robbed and murdered! Policeman
ALI right; III be there as soon as
have helped this pretty young lady
across the street.-New Yorker.
81 had to laugh the other day"-
"You don't mean you were absolutely
compelled to, l hopper" That's just
what mean. This was my employers
Joke. New Orleans Times-Democrat.
He-Miss Sears tells me she has
made up her mind never to marry.
she-Oh. that's an old trick OF hers.
She wants people to think she's still
giddy young thing.-Chicago News
Blobbs-Education is often a waste
of time and energy. Slobbs-That's
right l once knew fellow who spent
Ave years teaching his parrot to swear
and then went and got religion.-Phil-
idelphia Record.
Mrs. Peck (contemptuously)-
are you, anyhow, man or mouse7
Henry Peck (bitterly)-A man, my
lear. II were a mouse I'd have you
Up on that table yelling for help right
aow!-Cleveland Leader.
YES" said the man who poses as
connoisseur, Il am fond of music, al
though l don't know how to play"
THAT" replied young Mrs Torkins. as
just the way Charley is with the
races. Washington Star.
Have you a good cook?" asked Mrs
Bond Hill. "Yes, she's good enough"
replied Mrs. Chester Park. ''She at
lends church three times week and
all that, but her cooking is something
fierce. Philadelphia Inquirer.
Just from Ireland. are your" asked
Mrs. Hiram Offen of the applicant, "and
we're you trained across the water?"
"Shure, ye must know betther nor
hat, ma'am," replied the girl. 81 was
shipped across. Press.
Pop" "Yes. my SON." what is
an optimism" IAN optimist Is man
who believes that everything comes to
him who waits" "And IL he waits
and nothing comes. what Is he, pop?"
Why. he's fooll"-Yonkers States
man.
"0f course" said the man who likes
10 moralize, nature has its compen-
sations for ALL Lightning, you know.
never strikes twice in the same place"
That's small comfort for the man who
is struck in the first place" replied the
Kicker. -Philadelphia Record.
Mrs. Younglove-Be sure not to pass
that cake on the sideboard to the
guests this evening. won't you, dear? |
Mr.. Younglove-why not? Mrs.
Youngloye-Because made mistake |
and put IN bluing instead OF vanilla.
Il tastes queer. but isn't It beautiful |
ky blue?-Detroit Free Press.
Opportunity knocks at a mans |
ioor but once in his lifetime" ex- |
;laimed the prison chaplain to the |
bank sneak. Now. see here. parson.
opportunity knocked at my door four !
lines that can remember Of" .And |
lid you grasp It each timer II did.
md got sent up each time. "-Cincin- |
lati Commercial Tribune.
French horticulture in the expert.
mental gardens at Bordeaux has &C.