davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02
Es.ATEEsYDAY PHILosoPHY.


I'm not at all the sort of man
That loves to stew and fret;
I want to get the best can,
And that I always get
It's quite fine philosophy
In case of a rebuff.
If I can do no better. why
III do with good enough
I'll take the good the gods provide
While I'm on duty here;
III walk, or in my carriage ride,
And all with equal cheer
] like things smooth, but I'll not sigh
If they're a trifle rough:
If I can do no better, why,
4 II do, with good enough.
A clay dudeen or good cigar
Course dinner, crust of bread,
A common street or motor car,
straw or feather bed
AIS one to me; I always try
To get the proper stuff,
But if can't do better, why,
III do with good enough.
Chicago News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02
QUAKER REFLECTIONS.
LFrom the Philadelphia Record.

[From the Philadelphia Record
If we could only hook our troubles
the pawnshoDs would be filed.
At any rate. procrastination never
makes a fellow too previous.
The actor should always be strong
enough to take his own part.
Only a fool will give a receipt for a
debt that is paid in promises.
Most of IS want to get square with
our enemies before we forgive them.
It is possible for a man to keep his
troubles to himself. unless drink is one
Of them.
Wigg-'tEIow does Mallett stand as
a sculptor?" Wagg-''I don't believe
he cuts much ice
When a young fellow is keeping
company he must expect to be known
by the company he keeps
gins-''How did Biigones make
out with his system Of beating the
races Buggins- Wei, I belive he
still has the system left
BIobbs-''Why did you fire your Of
flee boy?" Slobbs-T caught him
smoking" Blobbs-s.so you believe
that where there is smoke there must
be FIRE. Ell -
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02
GLOBE SIGHTS.

From the AIcnlSOn GtODe.4
No one likes a sheriff very much.
Ever see a woman use a spade? It's
funny.
Take chances. The sure things are all
tied.
There are lot of failures for every
success.
The most wearisome cross of religion
is a poor preacher.
It is usually said of the best Of men
that they are peculiar"
This is the kind Of a day when the
bilious in you asserts itself.
No one has all the wisdom OF the
world; everyone has some.
When a man sees a door marked
Private" he wants to 90 in.
When some women are hard UP. they
raise money on their old letters.
A mans visit to a house is always
remembered by what he had to eat
Many a man who IS willing to be q
scoundrel. objects to being called one.
When old fellows get together, they
take satisfaction in calling each other
bows"
Every New York travelling man who
comes out west, invites you to come
and see him.
If you want your kindness to be thor
oughly appreciated, extend it to man
in trouble.
"A
so much as when she sees a crowd
gathering in the street.
A man chewing tobacco is a disgust
ing sight, but he looks no worse than a
woman chewing gum
At least, it may be said to the credit
Of men that they never sue women for
breach of promise.
We have more fear of a little crazy
man. or a little drunken man, than we
have of two big sober men.
When a woman talks a great deal Of
the sins of men. it is a sign her hus-
band does not behave himself
An Atchison girl who wears her
sleeves rolled up has such biz arms
that they look Ike what polite people
call limbs"
1.-The last man I saw Saturday night
was a bore: the first man I saw Mon
day morning was another.'-Parso1
Irvine.
When you give a child a nickel and
it says "Thank you it is very impo-
lite for you to neglect to reply: You
are welcome"
Every one has a bluff: A certain
Atchison man, who has nothing TO do
all day long goes up the street like a
streak Of lightning.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02

gances have been relegated to various
limbos. He has larger remuneration
than any other lecturer. His notoriety
as the twice-defeated presidential can
didate Of the Democratic party he has
turned to great financial account, and
his ability matches his notojety. His
friends believe that he win be the next
presidential candidate OF his party;
they believe also that he win be the
next president. They reason that Ger
tain senators will oppose President
Roosevelt that he viii persist in his
proposed reforms. that a split will occur
in the Republican party. that reformers
in both parties will seek new political
alliances. that the rank and file of the
Independent vote viii 20 to the candi-
date who will oppose the corporations.
that Mr. Bryan viii be that candidate
and that he will be elected. We shall
see-RObert Stuart Macarthur. in The
World Today for October.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02
.JAYHA WKER JOTS

Arkansas City has a mushroom
foundry. whatever that is.
Now Chanute is intimating that In
dependence and Coffeyville counted
some of their people two or three time
in making uD the census rolls.
Abilene looks for a return of the
hot times of thirty or forty years ago
if Senator Brewer and Ed Little both
really run for congress at the same
time.
Since Usage City has hopes of get
ting its mail delivered by carriers It
has become so metropolitan as TO re-
move the signs that stretch out over
the sidewalks.
The pension department. has receiv-
ed an application for the pension of
Boston Corbett from man. in Texas
who claims to be Corbett. The last
that was heard of Corbett he was down
in that region.
Frank farrell: There is something
about the time worn old hymns we
sang as children that brings a lump
to the throat, which the modern songs
fail to do.
Tom Thompson springs this query in
the Howard Courant, but does not say
just why he wishes the information:
How much time should elapse between
the divorce and the opening up of cor
respondence with the old lover?
Father Rupe of the Clyde Herald
answers the taunt that he was once
Burton man. Now the truth is, he
says, 1--WE really never was a real Bur
ton man. He is a man we scarcely
knew and every time we ran across
him, have had to be introduced to
him"
Joe Bristow, who has been in Wash
ingtcn so long that he has lost touch
with some things, ask, What has be-
come of the theory that the rights of
the user are paramount to the rights
of the owner?" and Charlie Finch
speaks up with the information that
it has a ten thousand dollar job with
a big corporation.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02
HVMOR OF THE Day

My wife says I mustn't drink any
more coffee. She claims it makes me irri-
table and unkInd.'
But does it2'
Il guess it does. When, she refused me
sup this morning l burst right out and
said Darn it, - Cleveland Plain
NO" said the passenger in the seedy
I've seen some pretty bad years but this
IS absolutely the worst ever.
the 3asseneT 40 with GbS t5e eIIf al asked
Ruinous competition"
What is your line of business may
I'm Chicago Tribune.
I don't like the new style of punctua-
school. There Is too much dash about it
for me. Baltimore American.
You better quit abusin' de devil So
said Brother Dickey. How does you know
but you may yit come ter ak a favor Of
him, Wen dey turn on too much steam
down yander?' Atlanta Constitution.
F-our-year-old Sarah had two uncles civ
ing out OF town. who We're about to be
married.
so you are going to your uncIes' we'd
dings, dear2 And where will they be mar
ried?' asked an interested friend of the
''One is going to be married in wash
ington- answered the child, and the oth-
er in January. -LippincOtts
Smart man. scorn not the woodenhead.
But stop a bit and think;
The vessel with lumber load
Is never known to sink
Pa" said Willie, AN equine means
a horse. doesn't it?''
And an OK is a kind of a COW. isn't
yes, one kind"
Of
is this equine OK everybody's talking
Pa thought a minute. looked sheepish,
and then said as he backed out of the
room; oh. that's a wether." kansas
City Journal
I see by the paper, said Mrs. Mex
dore that that stubborn candidate for
office has finally been induced to with
draw from the ticket in the interest Of
YES sweetly replied Mrs, Pepprey.
laudable object doesn't induce your
daughter to withdraw from the piano oc-
casionally."
4 would like TO know" asked the par
ent. who has a son in need Of some fur
Their education, what is the course at
The usual half mile course of cinders
and all that sort of thing, you know, alb
great NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. Ledger.
Willie's Mamma-Why didn't you answer
me2''
Wnlie-Din't you tell me to think twice
before 1 speak2
Willies Mamma-Yes.
whichever first I thought I would an
swer you and then I thought I wouldn't t.
Philadelphia Record.
The Heiress (pouting)-The count failed
to eal on me last evening-and has just
wired me he forgot it.
'.Oh, you must try and overlook it. He
is VIGOROUSLY careless in money matters.
you know Life.
YES said the guide, this is ne IA
nous Rubicon which Caesar crossed.
THAT little stream2" said the tourist,
in surprise Il don't see why they should
make so much fuss about it."-Brooklyn
Life.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02
Ille AIosnnito Exnert-

In the garden a soft air stirred the
hydrangeas- Back of the bluff the
waves crashed unsteady on sands pale
with moonlight. Two men came out
OF the hotel piazza for an after-dinner
cigar in the cool of the evening.
BIZ zz-bzz!
Mosquitoes ?"
-bzz-bzzi
by Jove, they are mosquitoes"
So said the first man. But the sec
ond, smoking. calmly said:
They're the harmless kind. They're
only the anopheles. They can't hurt
you
Cant Ell? Oh, very Well"
That was a louder buzz. and both
men looked alarmed
Was it a picipes % said the first
man.
BIZ!
mo. only a culex.''
And they settled back in their chairs
with relieved looks.
Bzz-iz-bzz-iz- bzz-izl
Stegomyia 20 whispered the first
man, rising cautiously. lone of those
yellow fever stegomyias that they've
got in New Orleans -
No" said the second. "It's the com
mon voIans."
So they sat and smoked peacefully
on while in the soft moonlight a
thousand mosquitoes, buzzing like mad
lLRpSu tieIi III q dOzen pAdcES at once
When they rose to go indoors. their
hands and faces and ankles were swol-
len and sore.
Nevertheless they were content, for
they had been reading up MOSQUITO lit
erature, and they believed that none
of their bites had been inflicted nv the
mosquito that brings the malaria, or
the one that brings yellow fever. or
the one that brings typhoid
AS any man can today distinguish
among the dog family the fox terrier
from the St. Bernard or the mastiff
from the pug. so, in the future. if mos
quito literature keeps UP. he viii dis
tinguish the culex mosquito from the
anopheles and the stegomyia from the
vOlaps the principles, and son on.-Los
Angeles Times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02
JOURNAL EHTRLES

Some statistician claims to have fgur-
ed it out that every sixty-ninth birth
is twins. It comes ostener than that
in some families.
The Wall street thief who stole $780,
600 worth of securities must have had
a hard time keeping the water from
stopping over as he was carrying them
The girl with petty foot makes it
a point never to let the bottom of her
dress drag.
Anyway Miss Roosevelt won't have
TO pay any duty on that photo of En-
DerOr XII nor on the proposal she is
bringing home from the Sultan Of
-
Now that the divorce of Norway from
Sweden has been granted, the case of
Hungary vs.. Austria is next on the
calendar.
Do you know how to tell malaria
mosquito from the ordinary innocent
kind that drills into your cheek2 A
Topeka physician says a malaria mos
quito stands with his head down and
his tail up; the ordinary kind do the re-
verse. The next time a mosquito bites
you Just follow him around and observe
his habits for awhile and you viii be
able to tell whether you are getting
malaria or not.
Up at Council Bluffs a man was sued
for breach of promise and the girl got
judgment for thousand dollars. The
man paid UP and left town because he
could not face the music after his let
tiers had been made public. Ed Howe
gives an expert opinion that the man
got off easy for writing the sort of stuff
he did. Here are some samples of it:
For Christmas ] want los kisses, IA
Kentucky mince pies. five blackberry
cakes, a peck of doughnuts. a 20-pound
turkey and a pan Of hot biscuits.
How nice it is that you are not going
to work this winter. You can put your
feet under mammals table and be nice
and fat next spring. I don't want any
walking skeletons in mine It's
very warm I changed my shirt five
times in one week If could wear
shirtwaists like the girls I would be o.
K. Kisses. apple butter and
baked beans I love best. good
kiss frora my sweetheart and a big
piece Of blackberry cake is the ONLY
thing I like better than baked beans.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02
ToafsIYs GoNE 10 sCHooI.


Is quite week ago, John,
one long, dull week. and vet
10 this weird change about the place
can't accustomed get
ne orooding quietude fmparts
. A sense Of strain and stress,
me silent back yard seems to me
mournful wilderness.
Oh, now and then I start, John,
and then sink back and sigh;
thought 10 heard a fumblinE fall.
wild and plaintive cry.
ne nush sends thrills all DER me,
Sensa tons sad and strange,
/ feel like Mariana in
The lonely moated grange.
The cat, with Independence new,
sits on the back-porch rail,
ana tries TO straighten out the kinks
OF her disheYeled tail;
me neighbours dog trots past the 6onr
Wlth nlen serene and spry,
AIQ casts careless, sidelong glance
From a triumphant eye.
The peddler through the ai1ev goes
And shouts out loud and clear.
Inere are no missiles flying now
To cause him pain or fear
It's restful but depressing John
It's very bleak and cool
This silence that broods round the house
Since Tommy's gone to school
Chicago News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02
Mr.. Bryan at the Chanfauquas.

William Jennings Bryan is last in this
list, but in many respects first of all the
ChautauQua lecturers. He has done an
enormous amount of work this season;
ne flies from place to place with aston
ishing rapfdity and with tireless energy.
His lecture. The Prince OF Peace" is
truly a sermon. It's political ideas are
high; its moral inspirations are Chris
tan. Mr.. Bryan has a great following.
He is a superb speaker, and his charac-
ter gives his words power. In recent
years he has broadened, Fipened, deep
ened. He is now sober. thoughtful and
rational Many of his reckless extrava-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02

face in the crowd will. as it We're.
sting your memory. I ought TO know
that man." says you to yourself. Now,
who the mischief is he?" Barker2 No.
'tisn't Barker. Barlzdull? No Funny [
can't link of his name. Begins with b
L pretty certain And you trail along
after him, as if you were a detective,
sort of keeping out of his sight and yet
every once in a while getting a good look
at him. Mmmmmml" says you What
is that fellows name? Why, sure, Nc
Conica.' And YOU walk up to him and
stick out your hand while he's gassing
with somebody, and there's that smile on
your face that says: I know you but
you don't know me- and ne takes it in a
limp sort of fashion. and start to say:
You have the advantage Of" when, all
of a sudden, he grabs your hand if he
were going to jerk your arm out of its
socket and beat you over tie head with
the bloody end. and shouts out: Why,
hello, Billy Vel, suffering Cyrus and all
hands rOundi Hold still a second and let
me look at you. Gosh darn your hide.
where you been for SO long? I thought
you clean evaporated off the face of the
earth Why. how air you? How's every
thing? That's good. Let me make you
acquainted with my wife. Molly. this is
Mr." But she says: Now don't you
tell me what his name is. Let me think
Why, Willie Smith! Well. of all
things, Why, how you've changed From
The County Fair" by Eugene Wood in
the October McClure's.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.


Many a poor carpet is hard to beat.
A mans good intentions seldom add
to his income.
Nearly all women are victims Of the
housekeeping michobe.
Patent medicine aImanacs have pro-
Ionged the life of many joke
A cat is as poplar wit hmice as a
rniser is with his neighbors.
A woman's idea of a square deal is
one in which she come out ahead.
Some men prefer long office hours
because it shortens their hours at
home.
While making hats for women the
spinster milliner may be setting her
cap for a man.
It's easy to pose as a charitable man
If you have the price ard are willing
to let go of it.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02

Nebraska shows an with more bank
deposits than Kansas, but it happens
that a considerable portion of Nebras-
Ra's deposits are counted twice. Almost
every bank in Nebraska carries a de-
post 80 some Omaha bank on which to
draw. and all Of these deposits. amount
Ing to q good many million dollars. are
counted as individual deposits in the
country banks and again in the deposits
in the biz Omaha banks. To make a
fair comparison between the bank de-
posits of Kansas and Nebraska, kan
saa City 40, should be counted in
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02

Andrew Carnegie greatly admires
Ernst Haeckel. the famous scientist of
the University of Jena, and not long
ago he commissioned a young man.
who was about to become d student at
Jena, to get for him a Haeckel auto
graph
The autograph. in English. in due
course arrived. It read:
Ernst Haeckel grateful acknowl-
edges the receipt from Andrew Carne-
gle OF ZunDt microscope for the bio
logical laboratory Of the Jena. UNIVERSE
ty.T
A microscope. needless to say. arriv-
ed. with Mr.. Carnegie's compliments, at
Jena with a few Weeks.-Exehange
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02
KANSAS C0NMENT


Two years ago the Emporia Ca
zette had two competitors; now. it has
the daily field to itself In the ten
years that the Gazette has been under
its present editor, eleven men have
been in the newspaper business in the
town who are out of it now. Still
tn ere seems to be no doubt of the fact
that there is need of a good. sprightly.
local paper" there that would stand for
principles, and print ali the news. =
Dozens of men think Bill White is a
poor newspaper man, and long to give
Emporla a really good paper. At
Gibson Globe.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02
REFLECTIONS or A BACHELOR.
IFrom dc New York Pcs. ]

[From the New York Press
The real reason men like to go fish
ing is because women folk never want
to go along.
It is never worth while to make love
20 a girl if she is sure you mean it.
A great many people never yield to
temptation of they are not tempted.
If a woman couldn't cry there would
be lots of pleasures in the world that
she couldn't enjoy.
When a man doesn't like to have the
baby play with his watch it is a sign
that his wife fears he IS cold to his
own children.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02

Governor Hoch has made good start
towards compelling derelict city officials
to do the duty they were sworn to do.
but it is to be hoped that in the interest
% the square deal he win not make
speciality OF Democratic mayors and
neglect those os the Republican per-
suasfOn
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02
HOW AR0IT THIs2

and has the chance to start new rail-
road towns? Any one will answer
you, Some railroad man Wen, this
is what is happening down in Jackson
county. The Union Pacific is building
a new cutoff called the Topeka &
Northwestern. and Mr.. A. d. Walker
one of our railroad" commissioners,
is to lay out a new town on the line,
to be called Della. No wonder Walker
looks good to the ailroads.-Beloit
Gazette.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02

And NOW some of the railroad mag
mates are saying that the beef trust
and the other big trusts compel the
railroads to give them whatever rates
they please. Another arguHent in favor
OF placing the rate-making power in
the hands Of the interstate commerce
commission
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02

When II comes to rural prosperity i
would be Wei TO cite the Fasteners
to Jewell. Osborne and Smith counties.
where the bank deposits run uo to
wards S4,50O,000. When Mitchell
county is taken in: making the entire
Fifteenth judicial district. the showing
will reach better than S6.OO0.000. A
few years ago this sum would about
represent the amount the farmers of
these four counties owed the banks,
but the balance is the other wa- now.
Smith Center Jurna!.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02

The Wichita Eagle says it seems to be
a well established principle in Kansas
shat one politician cannot build himself
up without pulling another down, but
Judging from Joe Bristow's editorial on
Phil Campbell he intends to try it.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02
A SUGGESTION

The Droposition Of Topeka 10 hold
a Worlds fair in 1911. in celebration
of the admission of Kansas to the I'm
ion, and spend a couple of million dol
lars in getting it up. would be all right
with the worlds left out. Cal it
1.-The Fiftieth Anniversary of the state
of Kansas That's big enOugh--Clay
Center Times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02
THE ANTI-PAss FEVER.

Kansas, Nebraska. Indiana and Wis
consin have the anti-pass fever about
right. In each of these states they have
dug UP an anti-pass statute or an an
discrimination law which is virtually
the same. As in every other avenue
of life the pure life giving blood must
come from the country distriets.-Be-
lott Freeman.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02
WHAT MII.ES NEEDs.

General Miles may be governor of
Massac husetts some day, and he may
go higher. Miles is a famous soldier,
a good executive. and all he needs is
the Endorsement of some state to make
him a formidable candidate for the
esidency.-Concord Patriot.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02

Francis Is. LOOMS has broken out
again. How much of a hint is it going
$50 take to convince Francis B. LOOMS
that the country has no great amount
81 sympathy with him. nevertheless and
Notwithstanding
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02

Mary yellow Calf. Of Cody, Wyom-
ing, full blood Crow squaw, is suing
for divorce, because. she alleges. her
husband Charlie Smallman wants her
to wear corset and high-heeled sh oes
and she won't do it. Very often the
untutored children of the wild have
more sense than their civilized sisters.
-COncOrdia Blade
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02

Senator Bailey might have said that
while the south has no Davis, Calhoun
or Clay in the senate, neither has she
a Burton nor a Mitchell nor anyone
accused of misappropriating life in
surance funds--Louisvilie Post.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02

When those eighty tons Of dynamite
are exploded in the 6uez canal the peo-
pie around there will know how the
kansas City iointists felt when they
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02

The Kansas City Journal says that
Henry Allen is charged with "conspir-
ing to rob the Kansas people of public
printing money" Hasn't the Journal
got its eyes crossed on those c9aarges2
AZ we understand IT the charge is that
Mr.. Allen conspired to rob Is. ". Hoch
and Arthur Capper of the chance to rob
the Kansas people. That's some differ
emf
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-10-02

Municipal ownership will be tried as
Republicans. Flank movements have
always been fatal to the McClellans.-
st. Louis Globe-D Democrat.