The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-07-20
WORRY THE CLERK.
WOMEN GUESTS IN HOTELS ARE
VERY TROUBLESOME.
Expect the Man with the Big Dia-
mond to Put Stamps on Their
Letters and Otherwise
Truckle.

ITO the amateur student of human
nature" observed the philosophical ho-
tel clerk, "the average woman In ho-
tel affords rare opportunities for the in
crease of his stock of knowledge of the
other sex.
"She rings the bell three times to q
mans once She apologies and ex-
plains so profusely to the bellboy that
the lad comes downstairs without the
least idea of what he Is to do. Your lady
in hotel will indite some nine or ten
letters a day. and each envelope seems
to contain at least three sheets of the
hotels paper. She will send the mis-
sives down, one by one. to be posted. and
each time she sends the naive message:
Ask the Office to put stamp on for me-
She never makes out wash list, but she
Just knows what she had, and one pair
hasn't been returned. She Indignantly
refuses to confide more to the Office
when he inquiries, but she affords a
wealth Of detail that in no way helps
matters.
For some occult reason she always
regards the clerk as the office, never re-
membering that he has feelings just
like anyone else She puts all sorts Of
things in the safe, but she Is perfectly
sure she handed in several things that
weren't there This makes It trihs
awkward for the Office, because he can't
prove anything, and she always Just
knows Very frequently she is thun-
derstruck by the amount of her bills. and
on such occasions she likewise Just
knows there Is mistake. Bills are pro-
duced. but she doesn't remember receiv-
ing certain goods at all, or buying them,
or anything about them. Sometimes she
subsequently recollects the little trans
action and comes down to the Office to
apologize. which makes the unfortun-
ate clerk feel somewhat better.
AT times she becomes a little con-
science stricken for ringing the bell so
often. Then she'll run out of her room,
ring up the elevator boy and give him
orders. Yet people wonder at these ele-
vator disasters! AS the old joke has It:
An elevator boys life has its ups and
downs truth that is apparent enough
when we consider these additional du-
ties on his part.
The lady in hotel expects the
chambermaid to see to this. that and the
a button here, take stitch in that help
hang up the gowns, and incidentally af-
ford aid in getting them on She doesn't
reflect, of course, that the poor cham.
bermaid is drudge, with enough of her
own work to do, and that the vigilant
eye of the housekeeper is ever upon her.
So the lady will say:--Iron these out for
me, Clara; there is a good girl; or Lace
up these, there's dear; or DO this for
me. Clara; I'm leaving this afternoon
often our lady patron will tack pho
tos on the wall, and when she is charged
for this little diversion she will make
terrible outcry right in the Office
Cards and callers! Heaven send the
office patience!
g I expect gentleman at about nine
she will remark. Please say | am out.
If any others come show them right up
The gentleman is late and is sent up.
Poor 'office!
When a card awaits her she will take
the Office into her confidence.
oh dear; I'm so sorry!' she ex-
claims. When did he call? Oh, yes,
the time Is on the card! If you had
only told him to wait. | know l didn't
leave instructions, but then, you see,
had no idea he would call didn't
even know he was in town. Was the
baby along, too? Oh, dear, I've never
seen the baby. 1t was born only last
year, and
There's no use talking, the Office has
its troubles!"