The Tupelo journal., 1905-07-21
BY MARGARET e. sANGsTER.

ask her permission to call. In ordi-
nary intercourse the matter is not
momentous. IL two persons meet cas-
ually, find each other agreeable, n
wish further acquaintance, they usual
ly find a way of bringing about what
they desire. According to strictly
conventional rules, the gentleman
should seek the acquaintance OF the
lady, and he may properly pay her
the homage of asking if he may call
on>her, or he may suggest to a friend
who knows her that he would like TO
be taken to call. There are no lnsur-
mountable barriers in a country fKe
ours, to prevent the pleasant social
mingling of those who are mutually
attracted. Nor is there the slightest
reason why, in most cases, a young
woman should hesitate to say, frank
ly: Il will be pleased to see you at
my home if you nave an evening free,
or Mother will be glad to meet you
at any time" or Mother and | are
always happy to sea our friends or
any other formula that is sincere n
cordial.
Girls are learning the true value
of mothers. In the more exclusive cir
cles of society mothers spread pro-
tecting wings, over their unmarried
daughters till the latter have evil
IDENTITY and definitely entered on the
privileges of spinsterhood. A young
woman who has reached her thirtieth
veal no longer needs the towering
pinion of maternal supervision at
every step. Girls, however, are
many embarrassments and rescued
from many predicaments by treating
their mothers with consideration, AMI
putting them as a shield between
themselves and any confusing sltua-
ton. The days are over, | trust Tor
ever. when on the announcement OF
a masculine caller, a callowL youth
or boy about as old as her own son.
a mother scuttles out OF the parior
like a frightened hen and leaves the
entertainment and the field to her
daughters. She may not wish to give
up her entire evening to the boy or
the man. but if she be well-bred, she
greets him and stays awhile, and re-
tires in no disorder. Nor, while she
remains, is her presence a handicap
on the group. Her girls wish mother
to know their friends.
How late may a man linger when
he calls is another query solicitously
propounded. OF course the length OF
a call depends somewhat on the IA
miliarity of the caller in the family.
An intimate friend will not trespass
against any accepted code if he re-
main until almost the ordinary bed
time of the family. This time, as
everyone knows, differs widely in diff
ferent households. Ten o'clock is late
for some. Others do not break tee
evening camp until II. But, broad
ly speaking, few callers should stay
beyond half-past ten, n ten is the
better hour for leave-taking in most
instances. A first cali should no be
more than a half hour long. From
eight to nine O'Clock in town calls
are in order. In country homes call
ing may begin and end an hour earlier
than is feasible in town. Never pro-
tract a call after it grows wearisome.
When conversation drags like a sleigh
on bare ground for PHYS sake arise
and depart. Don't ~monopolize the
conversation, you who receive, or you
who call. Good talk is not a mono
logue. It must needs show fair play.
r. y
Shall I relieve a young man of his
hat, his stick, his umbrella inquiries
a young woman, whose earnest desire
is to be courteous. Fashion says,
let a man look after his parapherna-
liza himself. The duty of a hostess
Ices not oblige her to take any trou-
bile in the matter. But here inter-
venes common sense Should you
happen to have a bashful visitor, or
q near-sighted one, why not tell him
that there is a table, a hat-rack, or
some other convenient place where
he may lay his outdoor things? The
clever guest, accustomed to society,
will need no such intimation. and the
instinct OF amiability is to assist the
opposite one, whose shyness is max
ing him wretched.
There are men who cling desperate
ly to hat and stick, as if should they
let them go they would be unarmed
in a hostile country. BY all means let
such sufferers possess their souls, and
their hats, too, in peace. In the case
of an aged or infirm visitor rules are
laid aside. Such a n is to be cared
for and aided in every way. Before
age and weakness polireness bows the
knee. Indeed, tie foundation stone
underlying the social edifice and hold
ing it up, is kindness, and hard by
that is another stone, called common
sense. If you build your good man
ners on these you will not be kund
wanting in a kings court, or in s
rear tenement.
MAY the hostess terminals a CALI"
Certainly not, unless she has some *
cellent reason for doing SO, as, for
instance, illness in the family, q child
with the Group, a husband with
rheumatism, a hungry man waiting
for his supper, when the maid is out
on her evening OF. Ordinarily, the
hostess sits, attentive and interested,
until her visitor rises to go. She also
rises and goes with him to the door.
Town etiquette dictates leavestaking
at the door of the dr~awing-room.
Old-fashioned people, Of whom | am
one, go to the house-door and say
good-by to a guest there. Politeness
does not require driblets Of talk on