Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1905-12-15
O
Short

"A wishing nurse, the otnef Gay,
took a dozen big oranges to n little sick
patient on New York's East Side.
Three days later, in making her rcgu-
lar visit. she noticed thai the oranges
were still on the table, untouched.
Doesn't Jacob like oranges|' she ask
ed the child's mother. "Ycssum,' was
the reply. "Why doesn't he eat some
Of these. then" 1--WE don't like to get
away NIT dem, cause they look SO
wealthy on the table," was the eXpla-
nation.
The following story is told of one
Of the former governors of Georgia:
Ic was out walking one morning, a
few days prior to his election, when
ne met an old negro. The following
conversation took place: Morning,
Marse john "Good-morning, uncle"
"Yo' sutlnly lookin' mighty fine" Yes,
I feel pretty good" "Do yo' know,
what yo' look like, Marse John?' NO.
What do l look like?' "Yo' looks as
If yo' had a dollah in yo'h pocket and
was runnin' TO- %gub'nor."
A woman who was called upon to
write a paper at n suburban current
topics club on Victor Hugo, went to
the Carnegie Library erected there,
and collated her facts from 4 number
Of encyclopedias. When she had fin
ished, having n quarter inch of space
at the end Of her paper, b thought
she would add something original,
and wrote: "Whatever we and sue
uu.- :, think Of Vic
tor Hugo, we must agree on one thing,
that he wrote good English" .-
Andrew Carnegie greatly admires
Ernst Haeckel, and not long ago he
commissioned a young man who was
about to become a student at Jena to
get for him a Haeckel autograph. The
autograph, in English, in due course
arrived. It read: ernst Haeckel
gratefully acknowledges the receipt
from Andrew Carnegie of a Zeiss mi
croscope for the biological laboratory
of the Jena University" A micro
scope, needless to say, arrived with
Mr.. C%arnegie's compliments at Jena
within n few weeks.
When the Prince of Wales was n
little fellow at school he ran out OF
money and knew his parents too well
TO ask for an advance In his allow
ance. He thought the matter over,
and then sat down and laborlously
prepared a letter to Queen Victoria,
his grandmother, pathetically begging
her to send him half a sovereign. The
Queen thought it a good occasion Tor
20 Is, ,,spI and inCtp1n
Of forwarding the money wrote an
autograph letter, full of wholesome
advice. A few days later h received
a brief response, which said: "Dea
Granny-Never mind about that
money now. l don't need it. l have
sold your letter for e."
An old lady once asked in a diapers
shop to be shown some silk. A young
clerk showed her some, saying: w
can do this for you at 6s. Cd. a yard
The old lady asked for something bet
ter, but the clerk replied that they had
nothing better. Whereupon the mas
ter came forward, and said: You
must excuse my assistant, madam, he
Is new to the business. Here, madam,
Is Il very SupClloI oL'iSi
yard. If it were not for the fact that
l bought it, some time ago we should
have to charge you los, for, as you are
doubtless aware, owing to the recent
epidemic among the silkworms the
price Of silk has increased enormously
Of late" The customer took the silk.
A few days later the same old lady
came in and asked for some tape. The
clerk said glibly: Here is some we
can let you have at Sd. the dozen yards.
If 1t wasn't for the fact that we have
had it In stock some time we should
have to charge Is, for, as you are
doubtless aware, owing to the recent
epidemic among the tapeworms, the
price Of tape has gone up enormously"
1t was her she hit him with her UNI
brella.