davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

A Chicago man naid ho couldn't
stop drinking and then proved that hc
could by committing suicide. Some
men arc so contradictory.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

Roy Knabcnshac is going to offer
tho president the services OF his air
ship. Barney oldhcld need not speaS
up and say Next"
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

Tho emperor Of Korea. too. has
omitted to send consratulatory mes.
sage TO tho president. He hasn't made
up his mind yc. Jus, whcro ho Gomez
IN.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

A SEQ bank clerk In Paris has
robbed the bank Of a million francs.
Paris Isn't Milwaukee. but Il Is up
and coming.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

No. that squabblc between Curzon
md Kitchener did not originate with
their wives" Kitchener is Q bache-
lor. and is suspected of what Ma.
caulay calls "a Turkish contempt for
women"
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

That advance of per cent, in the
price of rough diamonds can be borne
romplacently. What worries most
persons is the regular monthly ad.
vance in the price of black diamonds.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

Let us keep the straw hat with vi
as long as possible. II will be . Ions
time till next summer.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

A Pittsburg paper asks: do yaea'
tions payT' The summer resort ad-
Scrtisements Indicate that they do.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

A New York dentist is alleged to
have nifty wives scattered throughout
the United States. He probably isn't
worrying over the question Of uni.
form divorce law.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

Boston iB. nil excitement. over tho
prospective opening of department
store. Next summer Boston hopes to
attract tho attention Of n travelling
circus.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

Tho man who Is in the wrong is
ing proofs To sustain his position
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

Costa Rlea has had an election and.
according to a timo-honofed custom
In tha, country. the party with tho
most guns won.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

at is the awful isolation and sense
of no resources within reach that
takes the lcart out of men In the Arc
tic regions" says Anthony Fiala. Did
YOU ever feel like that financially?
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

An explicit contemporary notes that
boy has had his head decapita,cd." !"
Tint appears to settle the character
of tho injury.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

"A camel can go seven days with
out . drink. but who wants TO be .
caDel?"
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

Barney oldheld ought to give up au'
tomobile racing for awhile and try
airshIps. They are safer.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

Smokers find Lewis "Single Binder,
straight &c cigar better quality than most
10c brands. Lewis Factory. Peoria. M
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

Ask Your DsaIss for Aliens foot.Eass
Apowder. ltrcsts tho feet. Cures Swollen,
Sore, Hot, Callous. Aching, Sweating Feet
and tngrowing Nails. All oil Druggists and
Shoo stores, 81 cents. Accept no substitute.
Sample mailed FREE. Address, Allen g.
Olmsted, LeRoy, N. Y. :
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

Whenever tho ''time 10 ripe for the
great American play" you will hear
something drop.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

When Hoch reads about tho New
York dentist who married hfty wives
ho will realize how little ho improv.
cd each shining hour while he was out
OF jail.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

II girl smiles at everything you soy
suspect she thinks you are a fool
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

There are Indications that II win
10 a very cold winter on sakhsiin is.
snnd.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

Piso's Cure for Consumption Is an infaIllole
medicine for coughs and colds-N. W. SAMUEL,
Ocean Grove. N. j.. Feb. IA. 1900.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

When a woman tells you secret Id
cautions you about repeating II, be JUST
MS cautious as she IL.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

Mnbci-so. you have broken on the
be reasonable. or course. have
changed my opinion Of George, but
admire the ring as much as ever.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

woman can always get square with
hef husband by cleaning house.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22
Try me Just once and am sure to
come again. Defiance Starch.

Woman was made from the rib of
IAN put as TO the origin of ladies'. his
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22
when Your oroesr sax,

When Your Grocer Says
he does not have Defiance Starch, you
may be sure he is afraid to keep Ii un-
TIL his stock Of IL OF. packages arc
sold. Defiance Starch Is not only bet
ter than any other Cold Water Starch,
but contains 16 OF. to the package and
sells for same, money as u OF. brands.
II saddest when 1 sing" she cried,
This ancient warbling dame;
And all her hearers then decide
They likewise feel the same
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

There is lot of responsibility II
of 1t you have In your family.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22
TEA

The indulgence in tea is
so very slight, that the
pleasure escapes attentions
unless one waits a hit.
Write for knowledge Book. a. schiiiins a
Company, San Francisco.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1905-09-22

Inc by opening the frontiers for the ad-
mission of animals from other coun.
tries.
Following is the summary of the cot.
ton crop of 1905, as reported by the sta.
tistical committee of the Southern Cot.
ton Growers Association: Production,
9,5SS, 1913 bales; percentage of condi-
tion as compared with last year. 1873,
as compared with the governments es-
innate Of 72.1. The yield is regarded
as exceedingly small, as from ten to
ten and one-half million tales was ex-
pected.
Samuel r. Gummere. the American
mic lister at Tangier, and several Euro.
pean inhabitants, have abandoned
their residences in the suburbs and re-
moved to the center of the town at
the request of the Moroccan authori-
ties who said they were unable to
guarantee their security owing to the
disturbed condition of the surround.
ing districts. Severe fighting contin-
ues between Raisuli's and other
tribes.
The attitude Of labor toward Joseph
Chamberlain's fiscal policy was en-
phatically attested by vote at the ses-
sion of the British Trades Union Con-
gress at Hanley. By a vote represent
ing 1.253,O00 members against 26,000,
tho congress declared for free trade, as.
serting that "any departure therefrom
would be detrimental to the interests
of the working classes, upon whom the
burden of protection would press the
most heavily"
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22
HOW JAP SOLDIERS DRILL.
Amusing Translations of Western
Military Commands That
Are in Use.

John Dunlap, missionary Of the
Presbyterian board at Fukui, Japan,
writes Of the japanese soldiers: 1--WE
find some amusement in noticing the
strange translations of western mill
tary commands 'Dress!' for exam.
pie, becomes Heels in line!' and Rise,
double!' is Rise. running feet!' It is
interesting, too, to see the struggles
of a language that is anything but
crisp and brusque, to adapt itself to
military uses. The imperative is little
heard in Japan off the drill ground.
There II is not only used, but used
in a manner that does violence to
Japanese etymology, the verb being put
before the noun, as in English
Shoulder arms!' Pile arms!'-but di.
rectly contrary to Japanese usage, and
q third word in such sentences, de-
noting the objective case, being
dropped altogether.
"Privates are divided into three
classes, according to efficiency, but
even the highest class receive less
than ten cents day on the field
Take q look at the men as they en-
train. After hard training and strict
selection they look fit and hard as
nails The infantry seem sawed of
at a uniform standard of about five
feet three inches. There are no short
men in the center and tall ones In the
wings Taller men are taken for the
other arms of the service, and the
men Of the artillery and military train
especially are big, thick -chested
heavy limbed fellows. who, man fol
man. could hold their own anywhere
japanese officers are businesslike
serious shocking lot OF men. No dilet
tanti among them. No aristocrats-
except those who are soldiers first ant
aristocrats afterward. No rich mems
sons who are officers because they dc
not know anything else to do with
themselves, Every Japanese officer IL
scientific soldier and It is no draw
back here. as II is In some armies. tc
be scientific. The more scientific tn,
better"
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22
overworking a Typewriter.

when a typewriter has been oper.
ated for several hours at stretch II
becomes a center of electrical phenom.
ena." remarked stenographer
Touch 1t with something metallic
and you will get distinct shock. Al
the same time there will be a crack.
ling sound and spark will appear al
the point Of contact. II another per.
son than the one who has been oper.
ating 1t should begin to pound the
keyboard after the machine has been
In continuous use for couple Of hours
he will experience real electrical sen.
sation. the pins-and-needles feeling OF
foot asleep. Drawing the sheet OF
paper of the roller rapidly will charge
the paper and 1t will crackle when laid
on other paper, II will also adhere
to the other sheets or to any surface
with which It comes in contact and
quite little tug Is necessary to loosen
1t. A long worked typewriter seems
to become an electrical plant on a
small scale and will furnish all sorts
Of surprises. s."--Philadelphi Record.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22
A FOLK STORY OF OREGON
Man from Indiana Saw Everything,
But There Was mo
Fish" -

His cousin from Indiana came out
here to Oregon, says the Portland Ore
gonian. to see the country and Incl
dentally to verify the wondrous stories
of the railroad emigration agents
Everything impressed him favorably,
the climate the mountains, the fruits,
and even the luxuriant moss on the
housetops. AS the open season for
salmon was on 1t was decided to take a
trip to Astoria Boarding the CLAN
Digger" at the Union station one balmy
morning everything looked auspicious
for an eventful trip for his cousin from
Indiana. But, alas, they had reckoned
without his royal hibhness, Chinook
Rex; he positively refused to run
Astoria was consequently dead. This
was In the very air and was very notice
able soon after rounding Tongue Point
On arriving at Astoria they adjourned
to Jeff's, the local Zinkand. to get into
condition for the battle with the ele-
ments. Things did not appear flourish
slow, even to his cousin from Indiana.
Ihe cousin remarked about IL to the
waiter, who replied, laconically: mo
fish"
Some 'Kopps' was suggested, which
met with approval. Conditions, from a
business viewpoint, did not appear to
warrant stock in the "dispensary" to be
In great demand. The barkeeper, evil
IDENTIFY thinking some apology neces-
sary summed up the cause of the state
of affairs in the statement mo fish .
After taking in the sights and smells
of the town and waiting on the corner
for the Astoria antedeluvian bob tailed
street car, which failed to appear after
20 minutes or more. ii was hazarded
that probably the car was not running.
Possibly not said his cousin from
Indiana mo fish,"
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22

Food Of the Natives Il Not to the Lik.
ing Of an American Rail-
road Man.

stayed on the lsthmus Of Tehaun.
tepec long enough to become natural.
ized-long enough to learn to ca,
iguanas, snakes and monkeys, and then
things got too interesting and | re-
turned to Mexico CITY," said E. w
Swank. now conductor for the Mex.
lean National railroad, but recently
performing like service for the Te-
huantepec National, according to the
Mexican Herald Living in that
country is no picnic" continued Mr..
Swank, discussing his residence there
I'm the first place, 1t narrows down
to a question of acquiring a taste for
all sorts of foreign beasts and birds
including reptiles of weird and un-
natural shape. The first day | got
there they served up a nice sort of
cherry-brown stew, which sent up such
an appetizing odor that fell to and
devouied two heaping platefuls with
out questioning the component parts
OF the potpourri Subsequently |
learned that 1t was delicate and
cholce little monkey that had been
killed but the same morning par
tCok of il.
OF course things on my inside went
Into open rebellion for awhile. but /
soon recovered and was ready for any
thing else that showed up. And The
way they would serve up outlandisn
dishes was enough to make one for
swear forever the use of food Not
long after the monkey episode they
put some sort of a reptile on the table
which reminded me of a small alli-
gator. | figured 1t out to be gar
fish, and ate literally Later they
told me 1t was an iguana, or huge
ground lizard, which sometimes gets
three or four feet long Then | took
a turn at snakes and eels and owls
and such like flesh and fish, until
verify believe there Is not a specimen n
OF either bird or beast on the whole
Tehuantepec isthmus with which my
astronomical apparatus is not ia
miliar. Even parrots become good
fool when properly served as | can
testify froE: personal experience
For a solid month kept nature
from becoming exhausted by feeding
on anything that walked or flew or
swan. Occasionally one of the boys
would catch mud turtle in one OF
the small rivers on the isthmus and
we would have royal feast for
day or so on its meat OF all the
rank and apparently uncleanly things
| ever saw. commend me to a mud
turtle, They have stencil like
glue factory tasted 1t several times
but my olfactory organs would not
permit me to eat very much. Next
time I'll take mine from the soap
repository People laughed at me for
my fastidious taste at first, but later
on l became just like the rest and
could stomach anything. Now when
I've got back to civilization I really
can appreciate good meal No
more isthmus for me. The Tehuante-
pee is mighty good road to work
with, but the ways of living on the
isthmus are not such as to commend
themselves to one who has been
raised in the effete civilization Of the
capital" I,nI.p~
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22

These People In New York CITY Are
WILDLY Scattered and Are
Home Loving.

Few Swedish restaurants flourish II
New York. The many thousant
Swedes In the city are widely scat.
tered In little colonies throughout al
the boroughs, and few Of these littls
groups are able to support a restau.
rant devoted especially to their native
cooking says the Sun.
Brooklyn has long had a consider.
able Swedish population, and the besi
known and most distinctive Swedish
restaurant is In that borough Else.
where there are Swedes who keep res.
taurants, and some of these serve On
occasion characteristic Swedish dishes
but they find It necessary to conform
to ordinary public demands in the
matter of cooking. One Swede who
has a restaurant centrally situated in
Manhattan entertains many of his fel.
low countrymen, but serves for the
most part just such dishes az one gets
in hundred other restaurants all over
town.
One reason why II Is dificult TO keep
distinctively Swedish restaurants 60
ing in New York is that the Swedes
are domestic in their habits. Many
who have not homes of their own are
servants In the homes of others.
An article that is characteristic Of
the true Swedish restaurants is a fruit
soup, usually thickened with CORE
starch. A puree CT apples or of pears
sounds little odd, but such purees
there are; also puree of prunes
These fruit soups, are served cold, and
oftener In summer than in winter.
Even persons not accustomed to
Swedish cooking profess to like the
fruit soups.
In the matter of meats and vege-
tables the Swedish restaurants are
much like others. There is among
Swedes of wealth somewhat extrava-
CANT tradition as to the table, but most
Swedish immigrants bring with them
a different tradition, and the Swedish
restaurants in New York do not re-
fleet the luxury of Stockholm. Des.
serts, however, are of many kinds and
rice Is much used in making puddings.
AS HllSHt De eApeCteu, only IeW
fruits are much used in Swedish cook
ing. The banana is usually curiosity
to the Swedish immigrant he rarely
sees ii at home.
One berry is largely imported into
this country from Sweden-the lingon
sometimes called the Swedish cram
berry. 1t grows upon upland on a
bush and in great quantities. The
berry somewhat resembles our cram
berry in color, but Is much smaller
These berries are cooked and bar
relied In their own Juice for exporta-
ton. Here they are sold in glass Jars
by Swedish grocers and are much used
in the Swedish restaurants and by
Swedish families. They are served as
sauce with meats and sometimes
preserved pears are mingled with
them. The Swedes prefer the sharp
tart of the lingon to the flavor of the
cranberry. There are no native Swed-
ish wines.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22
Pest from America.

The orange growers Of southern Eu
rope have discovered a new enemy to
their fruit more dangerous perhaps
than the changes In the weather. In
the region of Nice and some parts OF
Spain and Italy the trees have beer
found to be dying. An investigation
has proved that the trees are attacked
by an insect called chrysomphalus
minor, which they say has beer
brought to them from America. They
think It is a cousin of the phylloxera
They say that It is more destructiv.
there than In the United States.--N. Y
Post.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22
Walters Walk.

Some interesting particulars are
given as to the ground covered by a
waiter in dancing attendance upon the
guests in restaurant in Christiania
The waiter had provided himself with
a psdometer before starting his work
According to his calculations, he took
rather snder 100000 steps. covering
some 81 miles. between a. m. and
1890 a. m. Working land walking)
four days week. he calculated that
he covered more than 1000 miles in 8
year Which would seem to show that
Swedish walters take their work very
seriously; unless indeed, the pedo.
meter was fast. t."-Westminster Ga.
,Zette.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22
One Night to Denver

From Chicago and the Central States
and two nights from the Atlantic
Seaboard, ON the Colorado Special.
Two fast trains daily Via the Chicago,
Union Pacific and North Western
Line, over the only double track rail-
way between Chicago and the Missouri
River. Summer tourist tickets to
Denver, Colorado Springs and Pueblo
and return daily, beginning June /,
$1,000 from Chicago. Corresponding
rates from other points. All agents
sell tickets via this line. Send for
maps, booklets, hotel lists, etc. Ad'
dress
N. M, BREEZE, Genl Agt., 436 Wal
nut st., Cincinnati, o.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22
silence Of the Vatican.

The Vatican Is a city. nay, q little
Kingdom In itself. Its thousands oi
rooms are divided up into Libraries
art galleries. chapels, monssteriss
museums, mausoleums. administrative
halls and private suites. Within the
portals Of the Vatican, the impression
wrought by Its disappointing exterior
vanishes completely. Here all is one
vast silence. No echo from the out.
side world penetrates to disturb iti
serene peace.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22

Managing Editor You should make
your headlines tell the story more de-
Anitely.
Telegraph Editor--What's the mat
ter?
Managing Editor-Why, here's a
story headed Another Kear-End Col
lision." Now, how 10 anyone to know
whether that's subway accident or
merely > defeat of the Russian army
In Manchuria?
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22
They COMPROMISED .

"Will you be my wife, Guenivere?"
mo. Charles. think far too much
of you for that. still want your
friendship. Let me be your stenog
rapher. That is the only way In which
] can submit to mans dictation. Gin.
cinnsti Commercial Tribune.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22
Gratified Curiosity.

II want you to take back that par
rot He uses dreadful language"
But only in Spanish, ma'am, only
In Spanish"
'Yes, ! know"
But how can madam know?"
II studied Spanish to find out what
he aid."-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22
Poor Old John.

Whatever became of the
Bulger family?
Bus Driver--Oh. Bill turned out fine.
Got to be an actor. Toms an artist;
Mary's a music teacher: but John
never amounted to much. II took all
he could earn to support the others.
Sketch.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22

''etop and think. young man. Why
40 you drink that. t.stun? Remember
that water 10 the best beverage--it 10
= pviceless drink" t
"oure. that's Az right. But I'm not
'o1tvsvagant In my tastes--the best 10
- nne for me. All l want is = drop
~ eonething good !"
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22

Mistress-Mary Ann, you have .
new beau In the kitchen every, week.
Now this must stop.
Maid-well, mum, If yea buy .
betther quality av food, could keep
'em longer than q week, an wouldn't
have to be gettin' new ones III th'
time
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22

"womau. said the very young man,
oracularly, "is snare and-a delu.
sion !"
(Which may account for the fact, =
breathed the girl meaningly, "why
men are 90 prone to hug their dela'
eions,"
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22
Pork Lore in Kansas.

A western Kansas paper says tina,
pork killed in the dark of the moor
shrinks about 2b per cent. In eastern
Kansas pork killed In the dark Of ths
moon has been known to disappear en-
tirely, II the farmer forgot to take II
in.--Xansas City. Journal.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22

Rev. De Kloth--My misguided
friend, don't you know that hell 10
yawning for you ?
Col. McTyde--Glad to hear 1t. Get
tin tired o. waiting for me, eh
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22
"What's the ma tier with Mrs. Drvd

Whats the matter With Mrs. Bryd.
eige ?"
Jealous. She overheard her hus-
band say that be was going to buy
ribbon for bis typewriter, and she's
been threatening 70 sue for divorce
ever since" M
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22

$50 you actually went TO church
Was the music go0d?"
"Oh, pretty fair. But they had the
hOmeliest chorus l ever looked at
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22
Worried About Her.

There's just one thing wanted to
say to YOU" began Mrs. Acid to her
better half.
"Only one, M'ria?" queried he. So
hcitously "Aren't you feeling welir'
Chicago Journal.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22

"They are two mosquitoes singing
In this room, and itg making me ner'
vous 10 the point Of insanity."
~ wouldn't let the hum Of two lit
tie insects affect me that way"
"But, man, they're not singing In
harmonyl"
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22

I'm the Society Islands, when mar
dies they whitewash his body"
"And here We perform the same
tender oflces with HE character"
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22
Poor,

Dyer-Were the revival meetings at
your church success?
Ryer-I believe not. The collections
amounted to only 1100.--Iife.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22

II always had an idea that an In
terne' was hospital doctor"
"Just what those Russian ships
need, at that"
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22

Malsie- It'slfoolish to use rouge and
complexion powders. Now, I've never
done thing to my complexion.
Graycie-So sensible of you-not to
try.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1905-06-22

"If ! refuse him fear he will do
something desperate.
Nonsense, dear. he will merely
be grateful to you for giving him an
excuse to 60 and get very drunk"