Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1905-02-03
DRIFTWOOD

(Pieces washed up by the tide. doomed, sawed
split and piled for the perusal and pastim o.
| row and steal the STANDARD In order tn at they
may enjoy little sunshine as they journey
| through this vale of tears.l
A lecture on Buddhism does not
exactly mean talk about flowers.
Most every town has a budding
genius" and like all budding things,
they are inclined to blow.
A Seattle theater advertises "bar-
gain" matinee. Probably it has, as an
attraction, remnant" play.
Some politicians in Olympia,
With aspirations great,
Will return home disgruntled,
With thoughts of a =" broken slate" !"
Many a colored man cannot say
which he prefers to see ee-Williams
and Walker, possum, chicken, or
watermelon.
The member of the Legislature who
has only introduced forty two bills
cannot reasonably hope to represent
his district again.
"He who fights and runs away, will
live to fight another day." is what Sem
ator Mitchell probably believes to be a
correct quotation.
Eat, drink and be merry" to-day,
if you happen to be in Seattle, for you
may be held up during the night, and
in the morning may not have "the
price,"
1t cannot be taken to The Hague
even if the colors OF the United States
were insulted, simply because q black
man robbed the Red, White and Blue
saloon in Seattle.
Bellingham claims to be terminal
point. Many hobos have known this
as fact for sometime; especially since
Judge Williams has given out his
views as regards those who sometimes
happen to tsrry too long at the wine
cup.
Instead of Russia court-martialing
Gen. Stoessel, it should tackle Admiral
Alexief, find him guilty and hang him
to the yard.arm, as was done aboard
ships in early days. Stoessel should
have a cigar named after him, and be
given free pass to l0-cent show for
a week.
John White, of London, England,
in his annual shipping review, says
1904 was a poor year for ship.owners.
This may be true. But ss far az ship
spectators are concerned, you could
not make Seattle people believe this
in a thousand years. They claim it
was the best year ever happening. up
to date, for them.
An Olympic man feels awfully down.
hearted. He tried to economic by
marrying bis typewriter, thinking it a
good scheme, but it wasn't. She re-
s..aA. to do any mora typeWriting, de.
mands two servants to take care OF
her, and insists that his next type.
writer shall be man, although know
ing that men want larger salaries.
Confinement cases taken for IS by
registered physician and surgeon-also
skilled nursing equally reasonable. Ad-
dress Nurse, Repeille.-Beliingham Rer-
ellie.
The attention OF Seattle physicians
is respectfully called to the foregoing.
However, come to think about it, per-
haps "Nurse" is acquainted with a
physician who owns his own home, and
does not live in flats, as many physic.
ians and surgeons do in Seattle. and
she is not barred from advertising by
professional ethics.
It is reported that Jimmy Britt, out
of the gains in three fights has bought
$4,000 worth OF flats in San Fran
cisco. It's good, wise thing that
Britt invested in Frisco fats. If he
attempted the same deal in Seattle, he
would find that be could not buy a
,"flat," let alone flats" for that
amount. Why, Jimmy, $4,000 in
the Queen City would not pay for
telephone, janitors and laundry serv.
ice for ten days. Stay with Frisco,
Jimmy.
Ex.City Treasurer Fred. G. Tilley,
OF Hoquism, is in Jail, charged with be-
ing short almost $l4,O of city funds.
The dispatch says Tilley has no known
bad habits. yet an expert accountant
of Seattle cast up his books, found a
shortage in the first year OF about 3d.
600; second year, $500; third year,
SO, 400, not including interest. Well,
if being short $l4, 900 Of public funds
entrusted to ones care is not bad
habit, it does not come under the head
of good one.
Senator Mitchell, Of Oregon, de.
clared in the Senate OF the United
States that he was innocent OF all
charges as to land frauds in his State.
Toward the close OF his address his
voice was broken by sobs, and he was
compelled to frequently dry his eyes
With his handkerchief. II hasn't
been reported as yet, that Harvey
Scott, editor of the Oregon'an, OF
Portland, Oregon, had to use 'he
Office towel to suppress his laughter
when he read OF Mitchell sobbing.
The Associated Press says OF sena'
tor Mitchell, Of Oregon, in addressing