Perth Amboy evening news., 1905-09-19
THE PROFESSORS
IRRESPONSIBILlTY
By s. E. KIsER.

on his way to San Francisco, ana tnere
are some important facts that wish to
lay before him prior to the beginning
of the Investigations which he proposes
to make along the Pacific coast"
I'm so glad. | want you to run into
Bixley's and change this bolt of ribbon
for another of the anne kind, only a
shade darker, and here is a stock that |
want you to return and get credit on, n
20 to H~enderson's and ask them why
they haven't sent the corset | ordered
last Tuesday, because must positively
have it for the reception tomorrow aft
ernoon, and-oh yesi Here's 16 yards OF
lace that | bought at Barnard's marked
down sale last week, with the under
standing that they would take it back if
1t wasn't what l wanted. You'll find the
counter just to the left of the elevator,
on the fourth floor, and a girl with dark
hair and eyeglasses is the one to give
it to-. Be sure that you save the credit
check, for | know they charged us 10
cents more than our bill anne to last
month. And"
Very WE'LL the professor interrupt
ed. "Ill try to remember. But won't
you please write on the outside of each
package just what l am to do with it?
Then I'll be sure not to make any mis-
takes. Where is that memorandum book
in which | have the data that l wish to
place before the doctor? All, here it Is.
um. Yes. The ~crustacean-"
And" continued the professors
wife, Il want you to be sure and go to
Lumson's and tell them the clock |
bought there last week isn't keeping
time at all. They guaranteed it for a
year, and must either regulate ito take
1t back and give us one that we can de-
pend on. Don't forget, William. | sim
Yesterday | was more than three min
utes early at Mrs. Franklin's lawn party,
just on account of that miserable clock.
Oh yes! l almost forgot. Go to the gas
Office. Our stove isn't working right,
and tell them to send a man out here to-
day to fix it. Here's a little list of
things | wishryou'd get at Todd's-wait.
| want to add a dozen pearl buttons.
Here's a sample. Now don't lose it.
You're so stupid. Is that all, | wonder?
Try to have your wits about you for
once. l declare you never get things
right. i sometimes wonder how you
IF that's all, my dear, | think I'll hur-
ry along. I'll not have any time to
waste if"
mercy sakesi l almost forgot the
most important thing OF. all. Iwant you
to go to Merwin's and see about that
case of silver l ordered sent to Sister
Fanny for her wedding present. l want
it to be sure. to go Thursday morning.
for if it doesn't it won't get there till the
day after the wedding, and"
Very well. If thatis all, | will hurry
along. | must catch the 1910 train or
I'll miss the doctor. and"
wait just a minute. l want you to
take this pin to Rowley's and tell them
the stone in it seems to be loose. Have
them fix it, and be sure not to pay more
than rs cents. Ii they want to charge
you more than that take it to Lumson's.
although I don't like their work very
well. Good-by, and don't forget about
going to the gas office. My goodness,
that mans so Eighty, l don't suppose
he'll remember half the things I've told
him. oh, dear! l wonder why ever got
married to q professional man? They're
SO Irresponsible"
1t was late when the professor got
home, and he showed signs of wear and
tear.
William" his wife asked as he
opened the front door, "why in the world
can't you remember that we have din
ner at $50? Do you want to make me
lose Hulda-and girls so scarce that you
just have to go out and beg them to come
in and-did you remember about going
to the gas Officer"
eyes. They'll send a man out to-mor-
row."
"And did you get the ribbon changed?
Where is it?"
"Here-let mt see. certainly attend
ed to the matter, and l am quite sure
that had it in this pocket. Yes. Here
it is. By the way, that clock has evil
IDENTIFY been gaining. 1t is one minute
to six now. They will give you another
for it If you will take this one back"
"Oh, you saw about it, did you? How
about Fanny's wedding present? Viii
liam Poddlekins, don't you dare to tell
me that you forgot it, I'll never forgive
you as long as live if"
Now, my dear. don't get excited. |
didn't forget it. They assured me that
they would send it on Thursday. as you
directed. The clerk said held remember
it, because you had telephoned him
about it every day since you ordered it
two weeks ago. rather think he pitied
me a little, too. And"
IF you had any spunk q mere clerk
wouldn't dare to pity you. I'd like to sec
them plying me about anything. Did
you get credit for thatl lace at Barnard's
and
my dear, I attended to everything
It's all right. by thunder!"
Clytemnestra Poddlekins clapped he,
hands to her ears and rushed from the
MONSTERS Drncpncn Navar hpf0ra hob