The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1905-09-15

any masquerade clothes to call on the
emperor of Germany, like you do when
you visit royalty in Turkey and Egypt,
for a good frock coat and silk hat
will take you anywhere in the day
time, and a swallow-tail is legal ten
der at night, so dad put on his frock
coat and silk hat, just as he would to
go and attend an afternoon wedding
at home, and we were ushered into
a regular parlor, where the emperor
was having fun with his children, and
the empress was doing some needle
work.
Dad supposed we would have to talk
to the emperor and the prince through
an interpreter, and we stood there
waiting for some one to break the ice,
when some one told the emperor that
an American gentleman and his boy
wanted to pay their respects, and the
emperor, who wore an ordinary dark
suit, with no military frills, took one
of the young princes he had been play
ing with, across his knee and gave
him a couple of easy spanks, in fun,
and tho whole family was laughing,
and the spanked boy tackled" the en-
peror around the legs, below the knee.
like a football player, and the other
princes pulled him off, and the en-
peror came up to dad, smiling as
though he was having the time of his
life, and spoke to dad in the purest
English, and said he was glad to see
the Bad Boy" man, because he had
read all about the pranks of the bad
boy and bid dad welcome to Germany,
and he didn't look sick at all.
Dad was taken all of aheap, and
didn't know what to make of the Ger
man emperor talking English, but
when the ruler of Germany turned to
me and said, And so this is the cham
pion little devil of America" and
patted me on the head, dad felt that
he had struck friend of the family
and he sat down with the emperor and
talked for half an hour, while the
young princes gathered around me,
and we sat down on the floor and the
boys got out their knives and we
played mumblety peg on the carpet,
just as though we were at home, and
all the boys talked English, and We
mad bully time. The princes had all
read 'Peck's Bad Boy" and l think
the emperor and empress have encour-
aged them in their wickedness, for the
boys told me Of several tricks they
had played on their father, the en-
peror, which they had copied from the
bad Boy" ami it made me blush
when they told of initiating their
father into the Masons, the way my
chum and I initiated dad into the
Masons with the aid of goat.
l asked the boys how their dad took
it, and told them from what we in
America heard about the emperor of
Germany, we would think he would kill
anybody that played trick on him,
but they said he would stand anything
from the children, and enjoy it, but
if grown men attempted to monkey
with him, the fur would fly. The
crown prince came in and was intro
duced to me, and he seemed proud to
see me, cause his uncle, Prince Hen
ry, had told him about being in Mil
waukee, and how all the women in
that town were the handsomest he had
ever seen in his "trip around the world,
and he asked me if it was so. I re-
ferred him to dad, and dad told him
the women were the greatest in the
world, and then dad made his usual
break. He said: Look ahere, Mister
Prince, you have got to be married
some day, and raise family to hand
the German empire down to, and my
advice to you is not to let them saw
off on to you no duchess or princess
as homely as a hedge fence, with no
ginger in her blood, but you skip out
to America, and come to Milwaukee,
and l will introduce you to girls that
are so handsome they will make you
toe the mark, and if you marry one
of them she will raise a family of
healthy young royalty with no humor
in the blood, and you won't have to
go off and be gay away from home,
cause an American wife will take you
by the ear if you show any signs of
wandering from your own fire side,
like lots of your relatives have done"
Gee, but that roade the emperor hot,
and he said dad needn'tsinst any of
his American ideas into the German