The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1905-07-28
FATHER OF THE HUMAN RACE.
Adam Came Near Having $50, 900 |
Monument at EImiFa, " Y

~
Monument at E.lmira, ~. Y
mark Twain in Harper's Weekly
Some one has revealed TO the Trib-
dne that I once suggested to Rev.
Thomas K Beecher Of EImira, y. Y,
that we set up a monument TO Adam,
and that Mr. Beecher favored the
project There is more to IL than
that The matter started as a joke,
but il came somewhat near the mat
eralizing.
It is long agO-thirty years, Mr..
Darwin's Descent OF Man had been
in print five or six years, and the
storm Of Indignation raised BY IL was
still raging in pulpits and periodicals.
In tracing the genesis OF the human
race back to its sources Mr.. Darwin
had left Adam out altogether. We
had monkeys, and missing links"
and plenty Of other kinds Of ances-
tors, but no Adam Testing with Mr.
Beecher and other friends in EImira,
I said there seemed to be a likelihood
that the world would discard Adam
and accept the monkey, and that in
the course Of time Adams very name
would be forgotten in the earth there
fore this calamity ought TO be avert
ed; a monument would accomplish
this, and Elmira ought not to waste
this honorable opportunity TO do
Adam a favor and herself a credit.
Then the unexpected happened.
Two bankers came forward and took
hold OF the matter-nOt for fun, not
for sentiment, but because they saw
in the monument certain commercial
advantages for the town. The project
i had seemed gently humorous before
it was more than that now, with
this stern business gravity injected
/ into it. The bankers discussed the
monument with me. We met several
| times. They proposed an indestruc-
/ tible memorial, to cost $4,000. The
/ insane Oddity Of a monument set up
| in a village to preserve a name that
/ would outlast the hilfs and the rocks
without any such help would adver-
| tise Elmira to the ends Of the earth
and draw custom 1t would be the
only monument on the planet to
Adam, and in the matter Of inter
est and impressiveness could never
have a rival until somebody should
set up a monument to the Milky Way
People would come from every cor
ner Of the globe and stop of to look
at it. no tour Of the world would be
| complete that left out Adams monu-
| ment- EImira would be a Mecca
/ there would be pilgrim ships at pill
grim rates, pilgrim specials on the
| continents railways Hbaries would
I be written about the monument, ev-
/ cry tourist would kodak it, models Of
il would be for sale everywhere in
| the earth. its form would become as
familiar as the figure of Napoleon
In the beginning a detail Of the
/ project when il was as yet a joke
I had framed a humble and beseech-
I 4
begging the government to build the
/ monument, as a testimOnyO Of the great
| republics gratitude to the farther OF
/ the human race and as a token Of
her loyalty to him in this dark day
/ Of his humiliation when his older
/ children were doubling him and de-
| sorting him 1t seemed to me that
/ this petition ought to be presented
| nOw-it would be widely and feeling
l " abused and ridicuIed and cursed
/ and would advertise our scheme and
make our ground floor stock go of
| briskly. So I sent il to General Joseph
/ r. Hawley. who was then in the
| house, and he said he would present
it But he did not do it I think he
| explained that when he came to read
it he was afraid of it: it was too seri-
Gus, too gushy, too sentimental-the
| house might take it for earnest
| We ought to have carried out our
/ monument scheme we could have
managed il without any great difficult
/ ty, and Elmira would now be the
most celebrated town in the universe
Very recently I began to build a
book in which the minor characters
| touches incidentally upon a project
l for a monument to Adam. and now
/ the Tribune has come upon a trace
1 OF the forgotten jest Of thirty years
| ago. Apparently mental biography is
/ still in business. 1t is odd; but the
1 freaks of mental biography are US
ually odd