Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1905-01-07

out us Tast as tne man can light Ii.
/ Tourist-Can l have couple of
towels. Landlady--Are Won going TO
stay here all Lustige Blaet-
ter.
some one tells story Of steam
boat passenger watching the revolving
light Of a lighthouse on the coast, and
eSclaiming;
( Book Agent Now. sir, can sell
yoI an encyclopedia? Old John Noa,
| don't think so. I'm tew old to ride
now. -punch,
Jinks-Hows your wife, BliEES?
Bl.nks-Her head troubles her good
deal links Neuralgia: BlMks-- No;
she wants new hat!
Teacher Which letter is the next
one to the letter H? Boy Dunno.
ma'am Teacher What have on
both sides Of my nose: Boy Freckies,
ma'am.
Pardon me" said the masher, "but
You look like young lady ! know"
Pardon me-" Interrupted Miss
Bright but you look like man L
ion't know Philadelphia Press
why sire you routing EthelT'
Jack said was beautiful ] told
him he must have been shortslgh,ed
What did he say Why the hor-
rid thing said perhaps he was."-Chi
cago News.
Clara overheard her parents talking
a.. N
the BIBLE she asked mo. dear"
Didn't God make meE' Yes" "Thcn
why didn't he say something about
4 IT, Harpers Magazine.
Tom Young Higgins has cheap
look about him. yet he is decidedly
popular with the fair sex. How do
YOU account for 1t? Jack oh, sup
I pose there is a sort Of bargain counter
charm about his cheap look
Il am amazed, sir. that YOU shouM
propose 10 my daughter. You have not
known her a week" True, madam,
bur ! have known YOU for some time,
aud every Body says your daughter
takes after you" He got the girl
II wisht wuz president Of the lam
Der Trust" said Jimmy. and dc base
ball managers had to come ter me fur
lie boards fer deir fences" WHY
asked Tommy. why. | wouldn't sch
dem hloomin' board dat didn't have
a kuot-hole In it,"
Papa Your mother tells me Won
haven't been 4 very good boy to-day,
Johnny. Johnny Between rs. pa /
think she's a little preiudieea against
me. Il was only the other day sh"
told Aunt Kate was Just like yon,--
Boston Transcript
why" said Bobby 80 his cklcr
brother. do herring nave ~ maRy
more Illnesses than other fish Who
saws they do" asked the youth al
dressed. why. this book says That
thousands upon thousands Of them are
cured every year"
NO. Harold said the sweet girl !;
Il can only be sister to YOU wei.
then" he savagely replied as he heard
n subdued chuckle. "as your brother.
shall claim the privilege Of lying
under the sofa while you make fools
of he other fellows"
Mrs. Potts Just to think Of Won
talking to me in such style You.
who used 10 swear was an angel.
MIR. Potts Look here. my dear, that
isn't fair: you know 1t isn't. what il
the use Of twittine man about The
lies he told fifteen years ago?
"If man tells the exact fruits ut
MI times" said the philosopher. ''he
has done rs much as ought To hc rN-
preted Of him" My friend" answer
ed the weather forecaFtcr. ''hc has
done great deal more than ought so
be expected ef him. Washington Star.
Friend | don't understand why you
and your husband should have separ,
atcd 80 soon. Mrs. Aftermath-~Ii WIS
all owing 10 the baby'S temper "Mer-
~ ON us. How can :hat be-" we
couldn't agree aS 10 which one of us
the baby took after New York
Weekly.
Little Ruth visited large whole
sale groccry store with her aunt.
While there a clerk gave her u small
sampll bottle Of kctclur. That even
ing she tasted il aud seemed much
pleased. oh. auntic" ~he exclaimed
some time later. when you 20 to That
store again. please tell the clerk /
would like another example " lotch-
up Little Chronicle
You were never married be
lievc:' 40; l was never married"
That's singular. isn't it:' NO. not
at all. You see, the first time feil
IN love / 4aid 10 myself IN marry
her or none " why didn't you mar
RS her them" Wei You soc. after
had become better acquainted with
her. said 10 myself, TN marry mono
rather than her Since tbat I've got
along very well With none.
50 the Poor Dog Was Gone
Old Mother Hubbard went 80 the
rupt,ird and ruhDrrrd Tho cupboard