davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20
k2mz20 O. LEDgz5

Edward G. Lewis of st. Louis.
whose novel scheme of doing a bank
Ing business by mail exclusively has
been stopped with postal fraud Or
der pending an investigation, had Sc
cured several million dollars in de-
posits and stock subscriptions. The
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

The courts have decided that n
young lady who is hit on the nose by
q foul tip while watching baseball
game from the grandstand cannot re-
cover damages. particularly If she is
wearing one OF those COMPOUNDED pic
ture hats when she is hit
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

A scientist says that the vital proc
esses of the body are carried on by
chemical substances called "hor-
nnnes" Presently we shall have hor-
MONIES controlled by trust and sold
in bottles at all drug stores.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

1t is reported that the man who first
said that woman could dress on $65
year has gone into bankruptcy owing
$4,000 for his wife's milliner's and
dressmaker's bills.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

The boy who stretched himself two
inches to make himself eligible as a
midshipman has the kind of stuff in
him that may enable him to o'ertop
his classmate.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

The Pneumonia Commission wants
TO send scientist to the polar regions
TO look for germs. What's the use of
soaring those benighted Eskimos to
death?
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

The man who wrote to Uncle Sam,
care treasury department, Washington.
asking for decision as TO which was
the head and which the tail on a
nickel. has voiced great public de-
mand and should publish the answer,
II he gets one.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

II Pharaoh's daughter could have
foreseen that Alma Tadema was going
to get e14,00o for his picture of "The
Finding of Moses" she would have
beeD differently dressed for the occa-
sion
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

"Sir Henry Irving read poem by
Alfred Austin" cables the foreign cor
respondent. Sir Henry is a wonder
fully robust man. considering his age.
bat he really oughtn't to take chances
like that.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

II these scientific bureau of agricul-
lure chaps would only develop a meth
cd of training potato bugs to live
solely on weed diet, now!
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

How it must, make the old-time
schoolmaster roll In his grave to hear
the modern professor planning to
make the schoolroom as easy as pos
sible for the boys and girls.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

But II Luther Burbank does evolve
a cobless corn won't 1t seriously inter-
fere with Missouri's justly celebrated
meerschaum industry?
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

A Philadelphia man made 100000
through forgery, but died and had a
fine funeral before anybody found It
out.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

The king OF Spain, 1t is stated, is
very early riser. Perhaps he realizes
the great ticks Admiral Dewey once
put in before breakfast.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

Foreigners may be able to get along
without American wheat. but how they
can get along without American corn
and rye we don't see.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

An article in Harper's refers to Fran
els Drake as pirate. The Spanish in
the West Indies call him the devil.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

Stop worrying about how fast the
ice in the refrigerator melts. and
cheer yourself up with the thought
that there is nothing doing in the ash
producer in the cellar.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

Jim Corbett and Bob Fitzsinmons
are going to fight for the championship
of the world-the next world, we pre-
sumo.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

Still, when Henry James referred to
some Americans "untidy language"
he may have been thinking of Ad-
miral r. Evans.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

II Will be recalled that the heather
Chinee was peculiar, even in the time
of Truthful James.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

Women love to talk about the hus-
band of the future, but they are pretty
well satisfied with the husband with a
present.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

Henry James says Americans say
"Cubar," "vaniller" and "cigah." Does
Henry think Boston Is America?
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

Sarah Bernhard says mems attire is
ridiculous. 1t is. Sarah. Don't wear 1t
again.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

II you would have your last words
widely circulated, spend your life in
robbing banks.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

Bandit Raisuli may now point with
pride to the time when he constituted
the Morocco question.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

Did you ever act as a dummy d.
rector? OF course, we don't mean to
insinuate anything against your status
in the domestic establishment.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20

What you want to bear in mind all
the time at this season of the year Is
that 1t really isn't SO much as 1t
seems-meaning. Of course, the
weather.
The Elbert County tribune., 1905-07-20
Ebert County Tribune
}. E. Pope, Editor and Publisher.
GILBERT. COLORADO.

with Nick and MIX both in favor of
peace, 1t ought to come eventually.
The Washington times., 1905-12-31
EASY GAMES OF MAGIC.

Take coin in each hand and tben
hold both arms out straight to left and
right Now say that you viii get both
coins into one hand without changing
the position Of your arms in the least
Af.er everybody is wildly curious ~
Know how you are goipg to do IT. walk
TO mantelpiece, lay the coin from one
outstrctched hand on it. and turn around
and take IT Up In the other.
Then tell another person chat Won
have hypnotized him so that he is un-
able 20 take of his coat alone. He will
take II off Immediately. OF course. to
prove that you are wrong, but the mo-
ment he starts YOU take OFF your coat
also. and thus you prove 10 him that he
couldn't take OF his coat alone
Then you announce that you will show
the guests something that no human be-
ing ever saw before, and that no hu-
man being will ever see again. You
crack "A nut. show the kernel and saw:
NO human being ever saw that before"
Then you pop IL into your mouth and
say; And no human being will ever
see 1t again
The Washington times., 1905-12-31
WATCH YOUR VOICE.

Kind hearts are more plentiful than
perslstentlX kind and gentle voices. and
yer love loses much Of it's power when
tne voice Is sharp and hard. Try. there
iore. most earnestly 10 acquire the right
tone In speaking, and guard yourself
carefully from falling into careless and
pad habits Of voice often a sharu
voice shows far more in-wiH than fhe
heart feels; but people do not know that
the speakers bark is worse than her
bite. ana they believe her 10 be i'll
tempered and disagreeable
IL is so easy TO pick up a sharp and
snappish manner OF speaking Very Of
ten II Is acquired ia mirth. and In the
give-and-take battle OF words in which
the boys and girls delight There is no
malice In their sallies. and a great deal
of fun. but meanwhile the voice Is often
acquiring a sharp and shrewish tone
which sticks through lire. making IL stir
up strife and iiI-will among its listeners
SO watch the tone In which you speak
and take ca-e that IL IS gentle ana
sweet A kind voice Is like music in
the home. and Is 10 the heart what light
Dana beauty are 10 the eye
The Washington times., 1905-12-31

came up with KingAsher AT that he
threw the sun down TO Fox.
The pursuing pair descended and ran
after Fox whereupon Fox threw the
sun back 10 kingfiSher
And so they had il all across the
island. until finally Kingfsher, with the
sur in his arms. climbed down the
dropping branches of the trees into the
canoe. and Fox tumbled in at the same
time. The others at once pulled away
from the shore.
Then Flint. coming TO the edge OF the
water. cried 10 each of .he occupants
OF the canoe in turn calling them by
name. and begging them to bring back
the sun.
None of them made any reply, except
Otter. who said: oh well. we might
as well carry il back"
At this Beaver took his paddle ont
Of the water and struck Otter oN-er tn
face. making II very fiat. If you look At
an otter today you viii see that his face
is StiIl very fiat
They got the sun home safely and fixed
il up In the sky and said Now we will
begin everything all over again. We
will cali this the new year"
But Flint and the old woman kept
coming over and complaining that there
WAS no light in their island. So they
made an agreement by which the sun
should be half of the time in SaplinV's
country and half of the time on the
island
This. the Indians used to say. before
the DAYS when they went to school and
learned better was the reason OF day
and night.
The Washington times., 1905-12-31

they We're all little afraid in the dark.
but they were ashamed to admit that
they were 50 foolish.
We must have a canoe said Sap
ling; who will make the canoe?"
Il will.' said Beaver
And ! VIII help. said Yellowham-
mer.
SO they went TO work on the canoe.
Saplipg all tho time saying, DO hurry
up, until they told him they would
stop work If he did not let them alone
When the canoe was finished. they ali
got IN, with Beaver and otter steer
ing. and the rest padding, and went
swiftly 20 the eastward over the wa
ters. until they approached the island
where the sun was, and saw the light
appearing over the waves
1t was a good pleasant sight.
When they approached the Island they
saw that il was covered with rema rk-
ably tall trees many Of which stood
close down by the edge Of the water
with their branches dropping Ove- until
they touched with the waves.
When the canoe came TO the tree
tops that dipped into the water they
stopped and there away uD in "A tail
tree near the center of the island they
saw the sun tangled in the highest
branches.
who win 20 up and unfaSten the
sun from its bonds. yondCr i'm the tree
top2" said Sapling.
Kingfisher and Fox both volunteered
10 try it, and Kingfisher went along
through the branches from tree to tree.
high above the ground, with ease.
straight 10 where the sun was. But Fox
could not do anything except run along
The Washington times., 1905-12-31
TABLE MARINERS.

The bluejay is greedy bird; ] often
watch him eat:
When crumbs are scattered from our
door ne snatches all the treat
lie drives the smaller birds away, his
manners are SO rude,
It's quite shocking thing to see him
gobbie down his food,
And sometimes. when I'm not polite /
hear my mother say:
Why now ] see little boy who's eat
inc blUejay way
he sparrows are a noisy set and very
quarrelscme,
Because each hungry little bird desires
tire biggest crumb.
They scOld and fight about the food, all
chirping Ne, Me, Me-
And sometimes. when We children are
inclined to disagree
About the sharing OF treat my mother
SAYS: why you
Are acting now the very way the silly
sparrows do.
The polly little chickadees are perfectly
polite:
They never snatch. they never bolt.
they rcver. never fight.
They hold the crumbs down daintily
with both their little feet,
And peck off tiny little bites-We love
TO watch them eat
And when my sisters good ut meals
my mother says: Il see
a little girl who's eating like a darling
chickadee"
Good Housekeeping.
The Washington times., 1905-12-31

q walk and then TO q complete halt.
His face looked white in the moonlight
as he turned TO ask:
Anybody hurt"
And OF course nobody was, and they
drew up before the Strlcklands house
as quietly as II nothing had happened
to them.
Perhaps" said Miss Van Eyck. as
they climbed out, 1T would be better
not 10 say anything about our break
away: II really did no harm and I'll
automobile was to blame"
The driver regarded her gratefully and
the girls all promised silence.
II was quite a test to for6-t the whole
thing Immediately and be merry and ex-
cited as when they started out and
still not 20 admit what IL was that
made their cheeks and eyes 50 bright
There was a beautiful supper whiting
for them-everything that cold and hun-
CRY people like and they did fun ius-
uce 10 K, Mrs. Strickland. in a lovely
gown. waited on them with her own
hands, and WAS most gracious and
charming TO each and all
Then Miss Van Wyck played for them
10 dance and sing and then. as the
everyone felt that the time for parting
was At hand Miss Van Wyck and Is17
bel closed all the .parlOr doors. lowered
the lights. and Miss Van Wyck said: 9
W e thought IL would be fun To voice
some New Year resolutions Each one
IL 10 say what she really wants. not
what she thinks she ought 10 want. I'M
br gin with this. / want To be more low
ing every day"
Here are few OF the things that
were said nj IsobeIs in the half-hghted
room See Il any Of them are. resolu-
uoIs you would make If You happened
70 be making New Year resolutions:
want not 70 be afraid. no matter
what the danger u.s."
- want TO DO the right thing what
want 10 love evcrybody-eve the
want 10 study harder this wear
want TO be good-just plain good
Wd1l 70 De 50 happy that / make
everybody around me hanpv
never want 10 live another vo.,r i
"hlch have done as little foT ofbar
people as ] haNc this last vear ---,-
The Washington times., 1905-12-31
A COINCIDENCE.

ne man who boarded the car at tho
"S'olilce mad no oVercoat ON ,-d -.
ne sat down he could moi -,
SlllVer- lie looked around To soc 90 -,
one noticed the shivcr. and n, -
his elbow softly observed. '''''' al
ITS quite a coincfderco
eIeu "hen / got on. also looked .,ro,;,,,,
20 zee II ANYBODY took notice VI,
time last s.'rinS did you spout ,o,,r ,,t-, ,i,,
ter overcoat2'' ''"i VIII
the other ~ answered
same with me. You bs,,or., -.
aoie TO raise the money 10 gaf +, oetn cen
NO"
Just my case. tborgh, 8, u....,.
come as easy as grease b,11 ~, =. "oulu
er more hard up in my life DO voi, .,o
IiVSfd saying that man is beaItbi9.S
"ihout an overcoat2'' '''iS'
&c nave said 80 To several paopIe -
- Iine me with me. But they grinned i'm
Yes"
,,o,, You .e. go around half-frozen. don't
81 do"
same with me. Any chance Of get
lihg your overcoat out Of soak This
Not the slightest"
same he.e. Greatest coincidence /
eyer ever heard OF We've got TO shi-shiver
,iu Sp-Sprlng and make the best of
she goes
And they shivered IN unison and got
up 4 bfotherly feeling that might have
been pathetic II they had been standing
at = bar with hot drink before them.
The Washington times., 1905-12-31
"MY KINGDOM FOR A HoRsElp

Having decided one afternoon To take
ride out into the country as far as
Billson's road house, the King jingled
his bell FOR the Royal Boss of the
stables and said to him when he came
running:
Johnson, you may order around the
grays for me, and see to Il that there
are no burrs IN their names or tails"
oh. King, but must inform YOU
that the srays were taken from us four
weeks ago on a chattel mortgage" re-
Piled the Boss.
SoE Then bring around the sorrels. -
The sorrels. oh mighty sovereign.
Went :.Iii the same way a day or two later -
Alas, Alas
Gone How are the bays?"
We nave not horse in the stable -
That's bit rocky on the chan with
a golden crown, bur we won't worry
20 you through the towns and the
country and say that your King wants
70 -, tfy a new Kind OF horse reed on
various kinds of horses Tor the benef1t
oI STOCK raisers ASK my subjects to
Dring me about one hundred animals 10
experiment on.
he Boss went forth and made his
wants known to all. and within n day
horses were being brought in The com
mon Plugs were sorted and rejected
Nlthln three days every stall was oc-
cupled and announcement was made that
no more horses We're needed. In about
week the owners OF those taken be-
San 10 come around and inquire about
mat little experiment. and when they
hdd oecoIne aggressive the King issued
proclamation reading:
IL pleasas our Majesty to announce
mat uhs new idea in horse feed Is !,
Sorkef and to return thanks 10 such of
MS loyal subjects as Insisted ON Dre-
senting him with horses k'rom Fbis
GATE on anyone found acting in a sus-
piclous manner around the Royal Sta
oIes VIII get ihe @. h. in shorf order
The Washington times., 1905-12-31
THE RUNAWAY.

Oh. Johnny Jones resolved that he
No longer home should stay.
Abused by all the family.
AS he had been that dayi
His mother Don't had said and said.
His father, mean. had raped his head,
The cook refused him gingerbread
And he would run away.
He'd go to war or sail the main
For he had just as lief.
The folks behind might cry in vain;
He'd gloat upon their grief
And then in after years, behold.
He'd come some day with fame and
gold,
A general, hedecked and bold
Or mighty pirate chief!
He stocked himself with things galore
To last him on his trip
Until he reached The seat Of war
Or got aboard his ship
An apple and a piece of cake:
marble, fer remembrance sake
And half decided he would take
His faithful crony Snip.
That very night he forth would steal,
And none but he should know;
And only morning would reveal
To all the dreadful blow.
But when at tea he heard them state
That waffles was the breakfast plate
He thought perhaps he'd better wait
And thus he didn't goi
Edwin L. Sabin. in Woman's Home
Companion.
The Washington times., 1905-12-31
e ONE LAST QUESTION.

Il was station agent at Il town on the
c. b. & Q. road for several years said
the ex-railroad man. land every day OF
that time brought new surprise as 70
the stupidity Of the people who travel
Let me give YOU one instance Of what
| mean. One day. when there were a
dozen or more passengers 10 go by the
Chicago train, and after each one had
come TO the ticket window and made in
qulries, | wrote out and posted IN the
following:
The II o'clock train is on time. II
will leave here NJ 11:03. Itswiu reach
Chicago at 4:30 There will be room for
All OF you. i can't get the train here
before Il.
Every person IN the waiting room
came up and read that notice and thor
oGghly diSeSted it, continued the man.
ana Tor the next ten minutes there
were no further inquiries. Then a State
Senator. who was going 20 the city with
grip in hand. and who had been pacing
Up and down the platform in an anxious
manner. tapped on the window.
We'll. what Is it?'
train
Good gracious. man. but haven't
you read the notice posted up?'
Yes. J read 81
Well. what more can you ask2'
I wanted TO ask II that train was
a passenger or freight
"G slammed the window and refused
20 answer. and he wrote a note TO the
superintendent that l was not the man
for the place and got me severely reprl-
manded."
The Washington times., 1905-12-31

pective hostess. Great was the delight
or the whole party when the night
came clear and crisp with a high white
moon and wonderful starIit sky
How merry they all were as they came
marching into Isobers about 7:30, They
laughed and talked and squabbled and
retated al their Christmas experiences.
MOST or Them were Miss Van Wyck' 8
girls. and Miss Van Wyck herself was
Inere looking so fresh and strong in her
heavy suit and sweater and furs-
she was 70 act their chaDer and
bring them back TO Mrs. Strickland to
be fed
The sleigh came at &. regular
old-fashioned big box filled with stra W
Isn't IT fine" they cried. Just like
the country. Climb in Climb inr'
In they tUmbled and sat so close to-
gether that there wasn't an inch left
Tor the cold TO get in And whenever
foot went 70 sleep or somebody wanted
10 sit near somebody else the whole.
crowd had to change position. and once.
COACH" they nearly tipped the bob over
once.
They went along the short drive first.
Ihe lake was all still and gray. chilled
edges.
The desert and the Russian steppes
must look like that" Jean Stewart said
Ny: But aren't you glad il isn't really
either of them. but only our dear old
lake. and that we're we -
was. -N
Ihey sang Justly every song they
knew and they waved and cheered the
other sieighing parties which passed
them on the road Orce in t1,o rerl-
some boys chased them and threw
enunks OF snow in their midst. but the
orlNer spoke 10 the horses. ana away
tshey new. leaving the boys i'm the rear
Jeerlng. but unable TO keen IN
All along the boulevard they whjsked
tnrough several OF the near suburbs
1nen turned for home. The crowd was n
niue quieter coming back and better
content 10 watch the beauty Of the night
and 10 sing more softly.
hrough the beautiful winding paths
@ ~ the park they came. along the silent
"i0onnt drive by the lake-then-
wei. no one ever knew quite how II
The Washington times., 1905-12-31
TWO GOOD LITTLE MONKEYS

! on dear. oh. dear, do feel so bad,'
sighed Furry. as she lay down on the
moor OF the cage among the straw.
WHAT'S the natter" asked Friend,-
hopping up. Have you eaten too nanv
nuts?" many
don't know. Do stay with me
oy' perhaps our keeper viii come
presently and make me well"
IL stay. said Friendy. and he sat
uo"h beside her. watching the other
iiioiiheys VINO were gamboling merrily
about them
presently some people came IN n
nc cage: and one lady pushed niece
pleased the monkeys were, >rt,o,. Low .,'
uP the ropes with IT and plave6 t,sl
oI-war. and then one took n ana -
SMay' with all the others after hin,
80 -, = race tney had. round the floor
anu up the bars and all over tho ,,js,.a /; ;;
EItehdy sat watching them a,5
them ne Soulu Join
r,,n Why don't you come? It e sucb
run. cried Brownie. tossing t5e -
oon into the, air and then c5tcbine no !,
,,,oii =, IN come; poor Furry fsD't
Wen; answered the little MONKEY sin,
ply Fop longing 1Gn to join the game.
watching, and then Brownie re ,,, %
LOOK here. I'll stay with bar 1,Ltto
n - ana ana nave a good rOmp." he said
rlendy was off in a moment -
Iao%nie tia s,n took his place beside their Iifl
ne lady had stopped to watch tb.,,
anu anu now She went to find the keener
80 ii I'll hIin one or the MONKEYS wa :
hot wen and that the others vyera Io,I,
ing after her. "S'' look-
q, IL, came at once and tool, Furry
d"ay 10 give her some ncdicf,,. Ltg
som MADE her feel better.
nd On 1 ne brought her back Friendv
, niiu brownie both ran up to asl, bo,-
hn,h was and the keeper stroked them
pom and told them they yyera ,-,,. 'iI,-.,,
KIND little monkeys 10 take s,,cl, [Sig .g
NJ ". .heir nttle companion. and thew
az ~, 80 piedSeu' especially when he
save We, mem q coiored ball TO toss abo,,,
NO I,ni,ough we really stayed bccanse
W. mked you. they told Furrv NJ,
cuddIed them both. and then ~ o,I,io :, 70
i,noHkeys came up ana they ali IA .
IoVelY game Of ball OIL i'i'i Il
ana this Is quite true story fo.
@ eIle Iady who saw il told me ana - 'i
an an relation of the monkeys ! o,I.,t,t
~ hhoW--Cassell's Little IroTl-s "7'''
The Washington times., 1905-12-31
POSTMASTER-A GAME.

Before beginning the game each play
er addresses two or more envelopes or
pieces Of paper 10 an ina ginary person
al place that is described. but not
named. for example
Hon. Jermiah Spellbinder. capital of
the New England State that has no
seacoast. or,
Miss Rebecca Swamproot, NJ D.. chief
city OF the Lone Star STATE
NOW choose a Postmaster. either nv
voice or by ballot. The Postmaster sits
Dehind desk or table. while In front
stands the waiting line of customers.
ne head of the hne says 10 the Post
master; i wish TO post letter" hand
ing an envelope
Nhere to-? asks the Postmaste-
The customer reads the address and
the postmaster must then name the
city and the State. II he cannot do rms
the customer says: I'VE must have n
postmaster here who knows every i'm
tell?"
The Washington times., 1905-12-31
THE STOLEN sUN-AN INDIAN NEW YEAR STORY

Once upon a time there was an In
dian who was called Sapling He was
not exactly an Indian. nor yet was he
n young tree, but something between
the two, and he was a great traveller,
which most saplings are not
One day late in December. when Sap
ling came home from a journey. he
found that an old woman. assisted by a
creature named Flint, had stolen the
sun and carried il across the water to
the eastward. TO an island leaving il
all dark where the Indians lived
SaplinS bore the dark for three days
and then he said: Il will go and bring
back the sun Who viii go with me?"
Otter. kinctisher. Fox. RacOon Beav-
er and Yellowhammer all spoke up
promptly and said I'm chorus: I'VE will
go with you. We are tired of wander
ing about in the dark. The truth Is