The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-11-20
HUMOR OF THE Day


How did that young stripping get that
diplomatic position2 Has he ever shown
He landed the job!" Detroit Free Press.
Say. Pat, can you tell me where the
Rockefeller building is?""An' hod did yez
know me name wor Pat?" Guessed it. =
we're good at guessin, sor2', Fine.
Thin guess where tn Rockefeller build
in is.'-Cleveland Leader
Johnny-BIamma, can throw this
comb away? MOther-But why, childf
That comb has lost but one tooth. Johnny
That's the very reason, mother, dear
You know the more teeth it loses the
harder it will be to part with it.'-Judge-
Collector Cangrfly)-You master seems
never to be at home. Faithful Retainer
Dim thinkin' he'd ind it hard to shpars
tonne to attind his own funeral Serum
lss, to be sure. they. put it on til he
Towne-I'n be careful never to get into
an argument with him again. Hes ca
BrOWne-You don't say2
Towne-Oh, he's a regular wasp.
Browne-I see. He always carries his
poinh-Philadelphias Press
First BIan-How do you do?
Second Man-Beg pardon, but yon hava
First Nan-Yes. l guess I have. We
were engaged to the same girl, but you
married her.-Pittsburg Dispatch
IT hear that English nobleman has dis
continued his attentions to Miss Nuritch.''
Eyes, he queered himself with old Nu-
ritch; the chump asked the old fellow II
he ever followed he hounds.
well Nuritch was a dog-catcher be-
fore he made his pile" -Philadelphia
Catholic Standard.
ssvo7,,ra 5er bnsfasf e-74v x-o+ eese-
SEEM sputtered the Stein.
Busy amt no name fur it." said the
Can. "Oim rushed near t death!''-
Cleveland Leader.
It wonder how graft originated2'' said
the studiOus man.
answered Senator Sorghum Man was
CRATER at the outset. Adam couldn't
even let Eve enjoy an apple without get
ting a rake off. Washington Star.
what are those things down there7"
asked the person who was unfamiliar
'sThose are the pedals, for the feet.
you know, replied the pianist.
"Ohl see; that's what you play the
foot notes with. eh?"-Philadelphia Press.
Eyes, all the boys called her plain
"And yet I understand two-thirds Of
them proposed to heretofore the season
was over"
started that she had inherited money
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Mr. Binks-one of my ancestors fell at
Lady Clare-Ahl Which platforms-
Punch.
Mar
what is ito"
rs the stun in that bottle bay rum7''
Mercy. MOI It's mucilage'
Il guess that's why cant get my
cap of. Cleveland Leader.
What's de OF deacon doin'?"
''Prayin fer a Thanksgivin' turkey"
well it's 'cordin' ter how high de
turkey stst''-Atlanta Constitution.
scribbies-wrieht' new book Life in
the Sums failed to make a hit hear
erty-only poverty Of ideas.-Chicago
Daily News.
Painter-What model are you going TO
get to pose for your statue of Fallen
sculptor-Haven's decided vet whether
itn be a life insurance president or a
political boss.-Detroit Free Press.
.'weH." said Nuritch showing Ka,so-
through his new house. what 40 vo5l
think Of the furnishin's2''
They show a great deal Of taste" re-
piled Kandor
"Ah think sop
yes. but it's all bad. s-Philadeiphiz
Press.
why don't you put a stop to the mad
career of these railways2' asked the man
who is always indignant.
my dear sir answered Senator sor-
ghum, IT have thought of it, But there
is no sense in a man standing on The
track and defying the locomotive. when
he might just as well be in a parIor car
looking at the scenery. w Washington
Star.
In Jackson, Ne. lived man named
lhorndike Htch, VINO was on a train one
time when it came to Thorndike sfaffor1
The conductor called out ssThornSII-ai
Thorndiker'
Mr. Rich replied: 'I an coming hut
I would rather you would cali me M
Rich. Boston Herald
Harry. did you not hear mother cali
ing you2"
Course did"
Then why don't you go to her7s'
shes nervous II I should 20 TOO
quick she d drop dead" and Harry went
on with his playing as II nothfrr fsfe
turbed his mind.-Albany Journal