Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1905-06-03
MEN ARE MYSTERIES

1T win only be necessary for you to drop
about half teaspoonfltl of the mixture
into his cup of coffee each morning" the
circular stated and the taste for tobacco
viii gradually depart from him. He may
not leave off the use of the noxous weed
Immediately. but within 6. week he will be-
gin to abhoT tobacco If the mixture is given
to him faithfully every morning"
And so the young wife who imagined that
her husband was going at too rapid a to-
bacco gait forwarded her little 81 and got
a bottle of the tobacco cure ito be secretly
administered"
Pretty poor coffee this morning." he re-
marked drily the first time she dropped
the half teaspoonfuI of the mixture into
his cup.
III the same as we've been using right
along she replied, craftiIy
But he was pretty oily proposition him
self and he had, unbeknownst to her. seen
the package containing the f1agon of agin-
tobacco mixture when it was delivered.
SO, after dinner that same evening he
produced large. bulky package of fine cut
from his pocket and took therefrom a
plenteous chew of tobacco 1t was the first
chew he had ever taken in her presence,
and she marveled greatly thereat. But she
determined to persist with the treatment"
Dead rank chicory again this morning,
isn't. it?' he inquired at breakfast the next
morning.
~ sure it tastes the same to me- she
replied.
That evening, after dinner. he produced
a short black clay pipe and package of a
new kind of tobacco that was as black as
the groundwork of 81 Jolly Roger,
Thought I'd fetch this old dudeen up
from the office" he explained airily. Its
as sweet as nut
Whereupon he filed the house with an
aroma of punk that was strong enough TO
break rock
This grocer person who is getting all of
my wages is certainly doing the cof-
fee,' he remarked when he tasted his cup
at breakfast the next morning.
Really said she. gazing innocently at
the 1ocent bunch of wild flowers in the
middle Of the table, ~ can't detect any
difference"
And yet there are fatheads who don't
believe that all women are actresses said
he TO himself on his way to the office that
morning.
That evening he brought home a box Of
auction stogies, and, after he had smoked
one of them after dinner all of the people
in the neighboring fats stuffed cotton in
the hall door keyholes and CLOSED the hall
transoms.
Il must persist. though thought his baf-
fed little wife, gloomily.
The Java tastes like stewed gunnysacks
again this morning. he remarked at the
next breakfast.
She felt bit sorry for him. knowing as
she did his extreme fondness for good cot
fee, but she was determined to use up that
bottle Of agdn-tobacco If she had to chloro-
form him and pour it down his throat.
That evening. however, her resolution de-
serted her.
After dinner, for the first time in her
knowledge, he pulled out a package of
cigarettes. and cheap, rancid Turkish ciga-
retteS at that He lit one at the table and
began to inhale it.
She went up stairs, poured out the re-
naming portion of her 50 worth of agtn-
tobacco and carefully hid the bottle
Coffee's bully this morning" said he at
breakfast the next day.
"Yes?' she inquired, absently
When he had finished his dinner that even
ing he lighted one of his usual brand of
good cigars.
''lden are mysteries to me-" she unused,
regarding him out of the corner of her eye.
women only think they're foxy" he
thought. blowing heavy smoke rings into
the lace curtains.