West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1905-12-07
MR.. BOWSER'S mad DOG"
II He Ever Meets One He Will do The
Eminently FIJI and Proper Thing.
WILL HYPNoTIzE 1T
But 10 Behaves Worry Different
When Harmless Canine Strolls
Into His Front Yard.

Mr.. and Mrs. Bowser sat on the
front steps at sundown of hot
evening, and while Bowser smoked
his cigar he carelessly glanced over
the evening paper, He had been
reading for fifteen minutes when he
suddenly exclaimed:
"By George, but that man ought
to be dubbed for a fool 4"
"What is it was askedr
"Why, man in St. Louis
was going along the street when
cry "Mad dog T. was raised lie
looked up the street and saw the
brute coming, and what did he do
but run INTO a yard where several
children were playing, and of cours
he escaped while they were being
bitten. There ought to be law to
take hold of such cases. Ten years
in prison would be too little for
him."
al suppose he was ratified by the
suddenness of the thing"
"But he had no business to get
ratified. II man hasn't the nerve
with him he should keep off the
street. have not gone outside the
gate il fifteen years without being
prepared for the cry Of "Mad dogl'
and knowing Just what would do"
Would you climb a shade tree ?"
"What DO you mean to insult
me ?"
81 had forgotten how fat you
were"
Another insult ! Mrs. Bowser,
II you have lost what little sense
you had when you were born you'd
better hunt up an asylum"
"But it seems to me, " she protest
ed, 'rhot most any man would
climb a shade tree to get away from
mad dog"
'Probably most any man would,
but Lemuel Bowser is not one of
the sort. am glad this subject
came up. Now, then, let us sup
pose a case"
"Yes."
"You read the papers that on
certain day PiRchen & Sticken are
going to put on sale 5000 pairs of
women's stockings at a9 cents a
pair-former price Co."
"Wcll ?"
"You sneak out of bed iu the
night and steal two or three dollars
out Of my pocket that you may at
tend this sale"
| don't do anything Of the kind,
Mr. Bowser never took
a penny out Of your pocket, and
you know it, You talk about my
insulting you, but what do you call
it when you charge me with being
a thief P"
al was simply making an illustrs.
ton, though sums Of money have
disappeared from my pocket in very
mysterious ways We will discuss
that part Of it later on, however"
"No, we won't Wen discuss
it right here and now Do you
say ever took money from your
pockets
al make no specific charge, Mrs.
Bowser. simply say that / have
missed small sums from my pockets
at various times. 1t may be that
the rats took IT, We will agree that
the rats took it. We are now
ready to take up the mad dog case
again. You are bound to have at
least five pairs Of those stockings il
you break your legs in the crush
around the bargain counter. Pro.
vidence steps in 10 prevent you from
making donkey Of yorself In
other words, between this house
and the corner you hear the shout
of "Mad dog 2' What want to
ask you is, What course Of action
would you adopt 7'''
"G can't tell.
"But you must be able to tell.
You must have a course thought out
and ready 20 act upon"
DWELL. / should first scream"
81 don't doubt IT,"
"Then ! should rush into the
nearest housc.,
"And The dog would follow You
and perhaps bite half dozen per-
sons That would be a cowardly
and selfish"
"Should climb a tree ?'
"You could not climb ladder.
You would only show your big feet
for nothing"
"lf there was man selling vcgc
tables perhaps I might jump into
his wagon, said Mrs Bowscr after
/ mature fhouoht