davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10
CONGRESS SHOULD GIVE
 THE PRESIDENT A TRAIN

ian" would expect him to travel except with a certain state, which, after all. Is less than better paid hired men who hap pen to work for corporations habitually treat themselves to, and less than accom- panies the progresses of the vast herd of millionaires. Let him pay the bills himself Or stay at home. say the stern economists who have no objection to self denial by proxy. On the contrary, 1t be- fits the dignity of the United States to furnish suitable means for the transpor- tation of the President.
 Let this be done by law. Let Congress provide Presidents train. A liberal ap- propriation for that object would be just, necessary proper and wise.
 The present state of the case is not only wrong, but ridiculous. Thus the President of the United States is expected to do certain amount of travelling. He cannot now do 1t in a style appropriate to the dignity of his office unless he dips still further and unjustifiably into his private purse, as he has done, or unless he act ually stimulates or colludes with the rail roads in a violation of the law; situa- ton painful to a sensitive mind, and in volving the exercise of a certain amount of innocent duress upon the already suf- ficiently belabored and bedeviled railroads.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10
VALUE OF WORD "eIRL."

From the New York World.
 Frank l.. Perley has an abiding faith in the word "girl' as part of the title Of a musical comedy One of the two pro auctions he has planned so far this season is called "The Girl and the Bandit. while the other bears the happy name of 1.-The Winning Girl"
 'There have been hundreds of pieces within the past ten years,'' says MT Perley, "the cognomens of which include that magic syllable. and 90 per cent of them have been successes. It is not superstition which makes me select ''girf' for my titles whenever I have an op- portunity, I realize the practical value of the word. There is probably no other combination of four letters in the Eng fish language which appears so generally to the great mass of mankind"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10
Bank Clearings.

"The bank clearing of Birmingham in September" said a well known financier yesterday. "amounted to $6,63S 429, a gain of nearly 50 per cent over the clearings of September of last year. In the first nine months of the calendar year the bank clearings of this city footed up s56, 121 ,994, as against $46,132,521 in the corresponding time of last year.
 Bank clearings are not clear evidence of the tide of prosperity for their volume depends to some extent on the number of banks. If we had but one bank there would be no clearings at al-no other bank to settle with. But still when the self-same banks show a gain of ten mill lion dollars in clearings in nine months, we may safely assume that business is increasing. But in Birmingham we do not need such evidences to tell us that every thing here has a strong, steady, healthy, upward tendency"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10
About Persons.

c. M. Green of New Albany is in the
 city for several days stopping at the Metropolitan. H. c. Armstrong of Selma is stopping
 at the Morris. c. J. Huggins of Chicago, well-known travelling man, Is at the Morris. J. F. Lacey of Jasper is at the Metro- politan.
 w. c. Davis, prominent attorney of Jasper Is in Birmingham looking after hv siness interests. The Rev Dr. w. B. Crumpton of Mont
 gomery, secretary of the State Mission Board of the Alabama Baptist state con-
 vention, passed through Birmingham yes- terday on his way to Cherokee county to attend the session of Baptist associa- tion that meets In that county. r. A. Watkins of Lineville is at the
 Metropolitan. The many friends of A. M. Wallace,
 the well-known travelling man, who has
 been seriously Ill at his room in the
 Morris hotel, will be pleased to hear that
 he is rapidly improving.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10
Was an Alderman.

David Montgomery, who died at his home in Avondale Sunday, was one of the members of the first board of alder men ever elected in Birmingham" said Captain Frank P. O'Brien. "Of the first elective board and I say first because the initial charter of Birmingham creat- ed by the legislature. named a board of aldermen, only two members having died, MT Montgomery and Dr. M NJ. Jordan.
 MT. Montgomery was 77 years of age when he died and was one of the early settlers of the city. He always took Keen interest in the development of Birmingham
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10
IN THE RUSH OF 1850.

From the Chicago Tribune.
 The owner of the great dairy was show ing a visitor around the plant.
 "All these thousands of cows" he said ''are milked by machinery. The milk i. conveyed into an immense reservoir. from which it is carried in underground pipes at a speed of a mile a minute to all point, within fifty miles of here. The system works perfectly. and yet there is ons drawback"
 What is that ?'' asked the visitor.
 well. of course. there's no cream any more It is impracticable for us to sepa- rate 1t here, and in this age of the world nobody has time to wait for 1t to rise.'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

England on the one side and the Czar and Czarina on the other. The Shah's private museum is chock full of the most atrocious productions. Under glass covers there is whole collection of cheap paper fans bought in Paris Of course, the fam- ous peacock throne is there, but 1t II not an antiquity, and the priceless gema that once adorned it have long disap- peared and have been replaced by imita- tions. The pictures made one shudder Ons really fine landscape I saw had been spoiled by paper cutting Of sleeping beauty pasted in the center"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10
COMMENTS ON MEN AND
 MATTERS OF THE WORLD

N ccoRDING to estimates made bs
 Vl those who ought to know, Presi-
 dent Roosevelt will take from his
 pocket approximately 5000 to pay for his
 southern trip For a man who has to
 make out" on a salary of $50,0OO a year,
 this is no insignificant amount. and it
 must be remembered that the President,
 who is not a millionaire by any means,
 will spend this money for the sake of becoming acquainted with the people of the gulf states. Therefore it is encumbent
 upon the south to exert itself in an effort
 to make the Presidents visit memorable.
 From all reports this is being done. Bir- mingham is making elaborate preparations
 to entertaip the executive, while Atlanta, Montgomery, Mobile, Jacksonville, New
 Orleans and Little Rock promise Mr. Roosevelt a welcome to warm his heart
 In New Orleans especially will the Presi-
 dent be extended that hospitality which
 is characteristic of the southern people. There will be no passes accepted for the
 forthcoming 'junket', therefore the south
 cannot overdo it's greeting to the official head of the nation
 Seven years ago a Birmingham lawyer
 bought lot for s275. and a few days
 ago he sold 1t for s10,O00. Come to Bir-
 mingham and get rich suddenly. It is announced that motor cars will
 be constructed to hoot softly. If they
 could be taught to run over people with
 "cat-like tread" life would be better
 worth living.
 'Let us go into the lane," pipes Alfred
 Austin. The paved street for us, Ali, when
 it rains.
 American Medicine" rather cautiously touches upon subject that is potent for
 controversy. This excellent journal dares
 not throw down the gauntlet on either side, but hints that patent-medicne ad- vertisers are apt to be a trife too plain- spoken in calling the publcs attention to the effectiveness of their remedies. For instance, there are a number of stunning
 Autographs familiar to every one on the billboards of the country, heralding the
 virtues of pellets, pills, powders and re- juvenators for ''the morning after" that might be toned down" trfe without dCllHs III u Indnller pTeJuulclal 10 morals.
 'I shall not want" Is a text taken by John D. Rockefeller. We suppose not. It is not his time to ask for anything A New Jersey COW swallowed a rake handle. She would have made a good churn, but she died.
 Chorus girls are at premium, said theatrical man of many years experi-
 ence. At one time managers were able
 to get unlimited number of young women who could both sing and dance, in addition to having a fair share of | comelness, but those days are past and | the chorus girl is mistress of the situ-
 ation. In fact young women are so hard
 to get for the musical organizations that | girls of inferior looks and talents are | paid $25 a week. Most of these girls fill
 us space and nothing more. One who can sing Is an exception. After an n- l spection of the choruses sent south, think you will agree with me that the | chorus girl market is in a bad way" A Connecticut man shot himself be-
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10
JOHN ANDERSON.

By Robert Burns. John Anderson. my jo John,
 When we were first acquent Your locks were like the raven.
 Your bonny brow was brent; But now your brow is bald. John.
 Your locks are like the snow; But blessings on your frosty pow. John Anderson. my jo. John Anderson, my jo John.
 We clamb the hill thegither. And mony a canty day, John.
 We've had wi ane anither; Now we maun totter doun, John.
 But hand in hand we'll 70, And sleep thegither at tho foot.
 John Anderson. my io.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10
IN HOTEL LOBBIES
Federal Judoeship.

Much has been said openly and in pri- vate in regard to the attitude of Judge Jones in respect to the proposed new fed- eral district judgeship which does Judge Jones such manifest injustice that I deem it fair to the judge that his views should be clearly understood" said A. T. Lon don yesterday.
 Every suitor and lawyer recognizes the necessity of an additional federal judge, and no one more fully than Judge Jones, and I am warranted in saying that know that Judge Jones only desires the bar to unite on plan and get 1t through
 "The intimation that Judge Jones wants an associate judge whom he could or der around and boss is utterly without foundation, as I know he wants any other judge who may be appointed to be- as he should be, his full peer and equal, and if the parties making ill-advised asper- sions in reference to the clerkship would only consider that the circuit judges still have the right and power to appoint clerks of the circuit court. they would appre- ciate how much injustice they are do- ing Judge Jones'
 "If the committee of the bar meeting will only agree on a definite, feasible plan, they will find Judge Jones, as usual, only influenced by sense of public duty, and willing to aid in any honorable way in securing the desired result.
 For my own part I am willing to aid in any way I can, but nothing can be done unless there Is harmonious action by the bar. emitting personalities and un- just recriminations.
 Constructive and not critical capacity it strikes me, is what is now needed let us all forego some of our pet ideas for the attainment of the common end''
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10
Concerning Politics.

My opinion is that neither Dr. Cum ningham nor' MT. Conner will have any special candidate for lieutenant governor on their ticket when they run for gover- nor."- said a man yesterday who keeps posted on state politics.
 T think that both of the candidates for gubernatorial honors will prefer to run alone and allow the candidates for second place to run on their individual merits.
 "I have discussed the matter with a number of men who take an interest in politics, and their opinions agree with mine. It seems almost certain now that MT. Conner will be a candidate, although he has not announced, so we may as well prepare to choose between the two men,"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10
Wise Willie.

From the Philadelphia Press.
 willies Mamma-Why don't you an- swer me?
 Willie-Didn't you tell me to think twice before I speak? Wilies Mamma-Yes. Willie--Well, first l thought l would answer you, and then I thought l wouldn't
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Mayor Dunne has son at the Uni versity of Michigan who is having more than the usual share of fresh man troubles. One of the indignities inflicted on the unfortunate. youth was to make him revile the "holy cause of municipal ownership"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10
Natural Deduction.

From the Columbus Dispatch. The fair summer boarder was having a look over the farm. "What are those queer-looking birds?" she asked. "Them's geese" answered the farmer. "Oh, yes" exclaimed the fair one. And do they lay all the gooseberries you user"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

A charter has been asked for the Central Bank and Trust Corporation Of Atlanta, with capital stock or s50O,O00 and the privilege of increas- ing it to s2,000.000 This is merely another example of Atlantas solid prosperity.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

cause he thought he was unworthy of his wife. He evidently believed what he told her before they were married. When Uncle Henry" Watterson waxes more potential than usual he divides his editorials like this:
 THE INTERIM.
 Chilly nights
 Hard on me,
 Covers scarce,
 Hully gee Paris specialists treat kissing as a mere disease. Sort of epidemic, as it vern.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Jimmie Hyde is banished from the state of New York by the desire of the legislative investigating committee to compel him to testify. Jimmie has trouble of his own.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

From the Washington Post.
 Alabama has a neat surplus in her treasury. The Alabama legislature meets only once in four years.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

St. Louis has lifted It's quarantine. One by one they are to be knocked out, and all will soon go except those that relate to Pensacola.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

The Chicago Record-Herald seems to think the Macon Telegraph is trying to boom the mayor of Atlanta for President.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

When the motor cars begin to toot blatantly in the shadow of the pyra- mids Tsi An will use slang and the Sphinx will be roped in for a side show.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

The Shaws In the country should not be confused, although George Bernard Shaw has not much margin over Leslie M. Shaw.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Aguinaldo is now a peaceful Filipino farmer. He went out of the world figure business because there was no money in it.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

South Dakota has woman umpire. and Hook" from her is probably enough to petrify the most obstreper- ous ball player that ever lived
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

The colored citizen who dreamed he was eating chicken pie probably didn't care if he never walked up.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

The Mikisa mystery in Japan bids fair to eclipse our Maine mystery in Havana harbor.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

By all means let there be half
 holiday when the President comes to Birmingham. Presidents who settle gigantic wars do not come every year.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Fine weather Is on tap at present for all but the stegomyia fasciata, and it has had it's day.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Russia has at last found a military hero in Kondratenko, who was killed in Port Arthur during the siege.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

An Indiana man was bitten by a mosquito and died. The mosquito must have been a New Orleans ref ugee
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Australia's federal capital is Dal- getty, which somehow has not distin- guished sound to the unaccustomed ear.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

The citizens of Pensacola are now reaping the fruits of their indifference and reckless disregard of sanitary laws
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

John D. Rockefeller wept at Cleve- land when he spoke of the time when he did not have a cent.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

"Jerum K. Jerum" says jokes come from heaven. Some we know ought to be sent to the other place.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

The song, "Everybody Works But Father" has driven a man to suicide. Summary action should be taken at once.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Count Witte congratulates himself that he can never be ranked among the grand dukes.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Emperor rranz Joseph should cable to the dove of peace to come on and take his case in hand.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Another preacher is trying to tell us what constitutes an ideal wife. The nerve of some people is astonishing.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

The Sultan of Turkey has added to his troubles by purchasing an auto mobile.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Your Uncle Shelby Cullom is repair ing his fences rapidly these bright Oc tober days.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Circuit Attorney Sager who succeeded Governor Folk as circuit attorney of St. Louis, says the office is the crookedest and worst managed of any prosecuting attorneys office in the United States. Do tell! And every body thought "Joe"t Folk was wonder. Maybe he is. It will take man of larger calibre than Circuit Attorney Sager to convince the public that MT. Folk is a fraud
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

The automobiles name as expressed by itself Is "honk-zipp-phew."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Lillian Russell is perennial and she costs as much as an orchid
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Panama and Costa Rica are not hitching up to each other so much as formerly.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10
Verify

verily l swear lis better to be Iowly born And range with humble lvers in con. tent, Than to be perkd up on gllstening grief, And wear a golden sorrow.
 king Henry VIII.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

The march of musical comedy has begun.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

The stumps in Ohio that MT. Taft is to go on should be big ones.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Pat Grove will not have to be cap tured again. Butte finished the job.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

St. Petersburg is playing poker. The Russian army has just quit playing the devil in Manchuria.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

The President will soon do one-day stands on the southern circuit.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Amateur theatricals are good for the young people," says a philosopher, but they are an imposition on friends who have to attend.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Great Britain meets the yellow peril by tying to 1t.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Nipon Is the land of the Rising Sun and funeral equipments.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

This is the year 5666 In the Jewish almanac.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

The corn crop Is endangered by th' lack of cars to move it.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10
THE CANDIDATE.

THE CANDIDATE. Who wears the smile that won't come off ! The candidate. Who's always glad his hat to doff? The candidate. He has a thousand wires to pull Of booze he's nearly always full, In every pasture he's the bull The candidate. Who has a list of debts to pay? The candidate. Who fixes" grafters on his way? The candidate. He has a job that is no cinch, Although he's scared he will not finch He'll trust to luck in every pinch The candidate. Who kisses babies everywhere? The candidate. Who 'jollies'' mamas here and there? The candidate. t> 4tlt Hi g To win his race he's got to hump, You may be sure he Is no chump. Whate'er he may be on the stump The candidate.
 PAUL COOK
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Birmingham is brushing up on Rooseveltiana
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Tn a flat a cornet and baby ar' classed together.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10
ENOUGH SAID!

The circus is certainly coming to town.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

King Peter is still having ba
 dreams.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Already fans are grieving,
 Each entertains a pain. Twill be a long time ere they See baseball played again.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10
GRAFTER'S YELL. Rah! Rah! Rahi
 Rahi Rahi Rahi

Whats the use of working at all? Whats the use of working at all?
 Craft ]!
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Graft! ! !
 While it Is painful to record that nine American sailors have been devoured by the Aleutian island cannibals, we patri- otically contend that of all the sailors in the world Americans make the best man. stew.
 Colorado bride has rebelled because she was forced to spend her honeymoon in the hay field. This Maud Muller bus mess never was what 1t has been cracked up to be.
 Up in Richmond negro parson named Coleman Booze, ran amuck, broke up all the furniture in his house, set fire to 1t and then went to his church and burned 1t up. A man with a name like that should be expected to do something extra ordinary.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Washington Bureau Age-Herald. .f21 c street N. w.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

No communication will be published without it's authors name. Rejected man. uscripts will not be returned unless stamps are enclosed for that purpose.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

Entered It the Birmingham, Ala. post ofice as .<econd-class matter under act of Congre, March 3. 1s79
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

The case of Ed Kendrick vs the Bir- mingham Southern Railway company is still on trial in the second division.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

L. H. Russ, ". F. Jordan and George D. Britain are the only authorized trav- cling representatives of The Age-Herald in It's circulation department.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10
GRIEVING

T sPtUIdITSI5 KTsbITg n a fleT6 disease. Sort of epidemic, as it v4rn.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1905-10-10

The SulJdn OI luThey HdS huucu Io his troubles by purchasing an auto mobile.
 Pat Grove will not have to be cap tured again. Butte finished the job.
  The President will soon do one-day stands on the southern circuit The automobiles name as expressed by itself is "honk-zipp-phew." The stumps in Ohio that MT. Taft is to go on should be big ones. -----s---- The corn crop Is endangered by the lack of cars to move it.
  Nipon Is the land of the Rising Sun and funeral equipments. In flat cornet and baby are classed together.  Birmingham Is brushing up on Rooseveltiana. Great Britain meets the yellow peril by tying to 1t.
  This is the year 5666 In the Jewish almanac. The march of musical comedy has begun. King Peter is still having bad dreams. 
 The circus is certainly coming to town.
The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1905-09-21
roon HOUSEKEEPING.

Good housekeeping is surely an art
for besides seeing that every room IN
the house is perfection in every oe-
tail, window curtains always 1resn
and clean, floors spotless, not a NECK
of dust anywhere, everything at hand
for the toilet-the service must Do
faultless, your maid in neat olack
gown, white apron. stiff white coiiaI
and cuffs, her manner deferen'iaI
when she opens the door Tor you of
waits upon you at the table.
The cooking. Of course. has 70 90
delicious. the kind that melts IN your
mouth, the washing must be- Slnques'
tionable, and the ironing a picture ~
itself All these things and many
more are simply parts Of good house e
keeping, and II a woman IS ao,e '.
carry on and control a house OF M ner
own IN the right kind OF way. aer
work Is inferior to no mans ana sue
deserves just as much credit aha ~.
tentimes a great deal more-Ams'
can Cultlyator.