New-York tribune., 1905-01-17

the fortress that mas Twice SuCCuihOeU u
japanese skill and irresistible valor.
THE TALK OF THE DAY.
1t was supposed that only in the western parts of
this country did the old amenities OF journalism
survive but we quote this from The London
CIobe': The value of 500 copies of The Daily
News was discussed yesterday at the North Lon
don Court We must apologize for any aspersons
we may have made the merits OF our contempo-
rary. 1T is good any other paper, said Mr.
Fordham. for wrapping up fish.
THE REVISED VERSION.
The queen of hearts.
She made some tarts
All on a winter day
Foe foT bTea ba@ kfasf 4 nioG6 food
So stuffed them full of hay
The king of hearts.
IIa called for tarts.
And took bite, of course.
Then TO his queen
Am 1, your king. horse
The king of hearts.
He threw the
Upon tine palace floor
The queen just rules
She never fools
-(Chicago Chronicle.
The Orange Judd Farmer in discussing the
latest horticultural freak the seedIess apple eau
tions intending growers against paying fancy prices
for seedless apple stock claiming that they are NOT
commercially warranted. While the apples may be
seedless, they contain the usual core. carpets.
The blossom end OF the apple. instead Of being
closed Is more less open, and extends consd-
erable distance toward the centre of the fruit The
seedless apple seems 10 be freak of especial
merit. The coreless apple is what is needed
soubrette-Yes the understudy says he used to
have very strong part on the stage
COmedian-So he did He used to be a scene
shifter and lift the mountains and castles.-(Chi-
cago News
Among the greetings to Senator Depew came the
following lines from well known Yale classmate.
The Senator's noted 'cass of whom forty-two now
survive of the original ninety-seven. are already
preparing to celebrate. with characteristic fervor
festivity. their iftieth anniversary. in 1906.
YALE. SO
CHAUNCEUM SALUTAMUS!
Sins hey for or the .. Jolly i old I6n", ,F1fty-si1 Boy
While he rides to the front let all wish him Joy
And fill the old fagon for Chaunce.
Let others his gifts and and his b graees pFOclam
Let the Torid ms 5 ngh b H1nIfs b a me-
"Old Festive" felcitous Chaunce.
An Optimist sound and Genius profound
In handy, post-Drandy Romance,
with wit most beguiling he'll keep the world
Our Prince Irrepressible-Chaunce.
And ah. by and by. at the ''T1itty-year' Feast
When We trip the Yale Jubilee t 9a. pancs -, ,..s,
As we hug him close. Will be Channce.
-(Charles T. Catlin.
In the schools of a Connecticut town measures
were recently taken to test the chidren's eyesigh
AS the doctor finished each school he gave the prn
cIpa list OF the pupils whose eyes needed atten-
ton. and requested him TO notify the chiidren's
parents to that effect One boy brought home to
his father this note from the principal: Mr. -.
Dear Sir: 1t becomes my duty to inform
Won that your son shows decided indications Of
astigmatism and his case is one that should be
attended to without delay" The next day the
father sent the following answer: Dear Sir; Whip
it out of him. Yours truly
TO WIT TO WOO
A Law Pill once a-wooing went.
With his said and aforesaid and much ado:
Through a thick black wood of large extent
ITO wit to WOO.
The Law Pill smiled with a vague unrest,
IVY WIN his % spi1 Ioad ana p[1ffsad 2t ana much sfo
But boldly he spoke. AYE hoot your best,
For T. am NO on a a merry merry quest.
-(Harvard Lampoon.
In Chief Justice MarshaTs time the Supreme
Court of the United States lived apart from the
rest Of the world. and lined together at a sort of
mess. only once year dining in public ut the
White House Justice Story was once rallied on
this aloofness, and explained It drolIy;
THE fact is we Justices take part In the So
olety of the place. We dine year with the
President and that is all On other days we dine
together and discuss table questions that are
argued before us We great nscetics and
even deny ourselves wine except in wet weather"
Here the justice paused II thinking this last
statement placed too great tax on human credul-
ity. and then he added. slyly:
What say about wine, sir. gives YOU our rule
but 1t does sometimes happen that the Chief Justice
will say when the cloth is removed: brother
Story. Etep to the window and see II IL does not
look like rain And II l tell him that the sun !.
shining. Chief Justice Marshall win sometimes rs-
ply All the better; for Jurisdiction extends
large a territory that the doctrine OF
chances makes it certain that II must be raining
somewhere"
Miss Iighted-I was very much admiral =. A.
wedding ceremony last night. i noticed one eentIas
man who never took his eyes OF me the whois even
ing.
Miss sharpe-Did the gentleman have a black
moustache. waxed ends2 ~
Yes; do qou know him2"
II know OF him, He Is a detective. He Wa thare
TO watch the prssenta."-iI-ondon Tit-BitA