davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Long Valley advocate. (Lardo, Idaho) 1904-1907, 1905-12-07
TO MY PATRONS.

The time is here
when all book accounts
must be settled.
Please make arrange
ments to meet your
account or a note due
without further notice,
and very greatly obIige,
Long Valley advocate. (Lardo, Idaho) 1904-1907, 1905-12-07

Forest ranger R. H. Rutledge
was attending to his duties in this
part of his field the latter part of
last week. Mr.. Rutledge says that
settlers who have no timber on
their land may cut 500 worth of
saw timber each year on the re-
serve by obtaining permits, which
he is authorized to issue. He gave
permits to Luther Fulton and r.
w. Davis to cut timber on the
southeast quarter of section 81 in
township 10 north of range 3 east.
Mr.. Rutledge left for his home at
Roseberry Monday.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-05
s~rs~~swe*st~s@*#s***s***e4

bring your husband. We are proud
of our view and everybody within miles
agrees that 1t is the finest in the coun-
try. Really, some days when you
wake UP and look out of the window
you would think you were in the Adj
rondacks-you actually would!
Mrs. B.-I have always hated noun
tains; they look like Jumps on the hor-
izon OF sofa cushions put on every
which way. 1 couldn't endure looking
at them day after day.
Mrs. McK.-That's because you know
nothing about them. You are accus-
toned to the Long Island landscape,
which my poor, dear, dead grandfather
always declared was stale, fiat and un-
profitable.
Mrs. B (portentously)-A relative
of mine died of nalaria-quite near
Seedyville.
Mrs. McK.-Oh, no; not near Seedy-
Vile, I'm sure; There has never been
case of malaria there since the town
was laid out. Perhaps years ago be-
fore the drainage was perfected there
may have been a case or two in the
outlying districts, but never since 1t is
the dryest, healthiest air imaginable.
Why, my hair never comes out of curl,
and I don't need to go to bed in crimps.
OF course, 1t Is a little out of order
just now owing to all the shopping I
have been doing, but If were home on
my piazza in Seedyville it would be
curled so beautifully that people would
declare I had had a Marcel wave with
hot irons.
Mrs. B. cher nose elevated)-Natu-
rally, 1 don't know much about the
curling propensities of Seedyvlle, but
any one seeing YOU now, my dear Mrs.
Nc cKinstry, would never accuse you of
a Marcel waVe-neveri And, besides,
when my husband met your husband
one day recently he said Mr.. McKin-
stry was in cut rate drug store buy
ing hundred quinine pills in a bottle.
That doesn't look like malaria in your
district, does It?
Mrs. NICK. laughing merrily)-Oh,
poor dear Benjamin! What a joke OH
him! Do you know, he positively can't
resist a bargain, whether it Is pills or
pa jamas, and when they had a sale of
quinine pills at Markham Downs he
simply had to go in and invest! He
never takes them by any chance--never
needs them-but they are so nice to
amuse the children with on rainy days
take the place of bean bags, don't
you know? I've known the baby to
play for an hour with a bottle Of pills.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-05

he was always either training for a
race or racing for a train. 1t quite
wore him out, and he complained that
nothing was ever near Christopher
street by any possibility. Then Ho-
boken made him so sad and depressed
He was worn to a shadow by the end
of the season.
Mrs. McK.-Of course our train SER
vice is the best in the country-such
clean, beautiful cars and such fine
roads. Nobody ever questions that.
Mrs. B.-The Long Island railroad is
quite the most satisfactory; there are
never any complaints. Nearly all the
trains stopping as they do at Jamaica
makes it so nice and easy for you tc
go from any one place to another. All
you have to do is to go and sit In
jamaica until the train comes along
that you want to take, and there you
are. You never have to wait longer
than two -positively--to go 10
any part of the island whatsoever
Then the accessibility of Lonelyhurst
by trolley. Only five cents, and the
most delightful trip, if you have a
little time to spare.
Mrs. McK.-Oh, but we can go by
trolley. too! Merely by changing at
Newark and walking five blocks and
crossing the bridge. Indeed, you
couldn't find a more accessible place
than Seedyville on the map. 1t is
noted for it. But l must be going.
haven't got my trading stamps yet
Where is the desk, do you suppose!
/ am so delighted to have seen you;
it has been a real pleasure! BY the
way. Mrs. Bellinger. you don't know OF
anybody do you, who wants to buy d
charming home in the country? High
elevation. pure air, mountain scenery
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-05

and find the boy. and you can do him
up. Your monkey business was the
feature of the show today
We went out and found a boy that
looked like the one that sassed me-
but he must have been his big b her
cause when l went up to hi and
swatted him i'm the nose he ed me
black eye, and / am sight.
That evening at the performance we
cut out the educated ourang outang.
and the lawyer we met on the cars
came to the show, and said we would
all be arrested for not performing all
we advertised, put he could settle 1t
for hundred dollars, and pa paid him
the money, and he went out and got
jag and came in the show and was
going to make trouble, when pa took
him to the cage where the forty-foot
boaconstrictor was uncoiling ITSELF and
the Virginian got one look at the snake
and went through the side Of the tent
yelling: I've got 'em again, Catch
me, somebody"
We got out OF town before morning.
and nobody was arrested, except the
negroes that got run over In the char-
lot race.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-05

Kill the bald-headed old man who is
the father of the monkey" and they
were making a rush to clean out the
show when the dressing-room door
opened to let the hippodrome chariot
racers out, and the way the chariots
scattered the crowd was caution.
Saved From Trouble
That saved us from serious trouble,
for the chariots run over a lot of ne
groes, which pleased the audience, and
they let us off without killing us. They
got me back to the dressing-room and
had to take pair of pinchers to get
that safety-pin out of my spine, and on
the way to the dressing room some one
walked on my monkey tail and pulled
II off, and that was a dead loss. Pa
sat by me and famed me, cause
was faint. and then he said my boy,
you played your part well, until the
persimmon hit you, and then you for
got that you were an actor, and became
yourself, and l don't blame you for
wanting to punch that boy who called
you a little niger and said was your
pa. After this chariot race is over we
will so around in front OF the seats
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-05

self, and / never like any one to go TO
the intelligence Office with me. Any
way, you have to be a regular sub
scriber to apply. I am a regular sub
scriber, so you really could not go with
me. But you won't find any difficulty
my dear Mrs. Bellinger, finding an
office; the city is full of them. just
be surprised If they had a department
for maids in this shop; they have
everything. (She laughs.)
Mrs. b. docking nettled. but chang
ing the subjecD-What time does your
train go?
Mrs McK.-Eight minutes past four
and consulting her watch) 1 must
be starting for it very soon.
Mrs. B. consulting her s)-Mine goes
at half-past three, but, of course,
don't have to hurry, as Thirty-fourth
street is SO handy. | positively don't
see how you can stand that inter-
minable journey to Christopher street
You must spend half your time on the
cars.
Mrs. McK.-Not at all. Nothing could
be easier and more direct than Christie
pher street. Almost any car trans
fers to it, and you simply get in the
car and there you are in a few mill
utes! My husband says the Thirty
fourth street ferry is simply the jump
ing off place. He hates it worse than
poison. Then the odors going through
Long Island city-simply awful! We
passed through on hot day once and
all the windows had to be closed.
shall never forget it. / thought my
end had come.
Mrs. B.-Harvey boarded one sum
mer in Jersey. 1t was the summer he
went in for athletics, and he declared
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-05
PECKS BAD BOY WITH THE CIRCUS
BY HON. GEORGE w. PECK
Ex-Governor of Wisconsln).

and the keeper took me behind the
screen and dressed me, and the old
fool forgot to put on my tail. He led
me out and l sat up to the table,
hitched up my cuffs, put a napkin un-
der my chin, took a knife and fork
and began to eat, just like human
being. The audience cheered, and
the circus people crowded around and
said / was just rs good as Dennis him
self. l went through the whole of Dem
mis- performance and never skipped a
note, until a smart white man yelled:
Where is the tail of your ourang
outang?" and the crowd began to be
suspicious, and more than a thousand
yelled: There is no tail on your
monkey"
That ratified the trainer and he re-
membered that he had forgotten to pin
the tail on me, so while 1 was using
the finger bowl he went to the screen
and got the tail and came out and was
pinning it on to my dress pants, when
the audience began to yell: Fraud!
Fraud XIII the monk!" and a lot of
stuff.
A Barrel Of Elephants
Then pa got on barrel the elephants
had been performing on and got the
attention of the audience and told them
not to be unreasonable. He said the
management had found by experience
that after the ourang outang had been
trained to eat like man and wear
mems clothes, that his tail was in the
way, so at a great expense the man
agement had caused Dennis tail to be
amputated at a New York hospital,
and while we always carry the tail
along 1t was only used when a critical
audience demanded it, but If this re-
fined audience so desired the tail would
be attached to the intelligent animal
The crowd yelled: PIN on the tail;
the tail goes with the hide" and the
trainer began to pin It on. Say,
could have killed that trainer. He run
that safety pin about an inch into my
spine. and l jumped into the air about
four feet. and was going to use a cuss
word that l learned in Philadelphia,
but | had presence of mind enough to
grunt just as Dennis used to. and chat
ter like a monkey and the day was
saved. The tail was on and / turned
my back to show that II was on
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-05
saa4#*44*+.s-FatFp.euwvser~sss

Mrs. B,-What a unique way of en-
tertaining children! l must get Harvey
to give his pills to Gertle-that is. I
would get him to give them to her if
he ever had any! But, OF course, living
in such healthy place as ours quinine
is entirely unknown. Would you be-
lieve 1t, a doctor came down once to
settle in Lonelyhurst, but he didn have
single patent-not one--the people
there always die of old age--and he
had to move away or starve to death.
He said II all places were like Lonely
hurst he didn't wish to live. ! believe
it was at Seedyville, wasn't it, where
there was an epidemic of pinkeye
among the school children last winter?
Mrs. McK.-The very idea! No child
in Seedyville has ever had anything.
Why, they established branch of the
board of health in an Office on Main
street, but it simply had to go out of
business-there wasn't thing for it to
do. Would you believe it, there isn't
an undertaken in the place! Like your
doctor in Lonelyhurst, one came there
to live once upon a time, but he didn't
have solitary customer, and I'm told
that in despair he moved to Long
Island.
Mrs. B. Gaking no notice of lasD-l
presume you have all manner of trouble
WltH servants! ! lHey never WdI1U tC
live in Jersey; It's such distance from
town. One told me that the red clay
made her sneeze Funny what a bad
name it has among them!
Mrs. McK.-Dear no, not a particle
of trouble. People there keep their SER
wants forever and ever-it is simply i'm
possible to get rid or them. But that
reminds me, I must go to the intelli-
gence office today before I catch my
train. Not that my maid is going, but
I like to look over the servants once
in a while, don't you? Just to see the
assortment they have. So diverting.
Mrs. B-What intelligence office do
you patronize? l had intended to look
in at one. too, before train time-not
for myself, you understanding SER
wants dote on Lonelyhurst-I couldn't
drive them away-but a friend asked
me to look up maid for her.
Mrs. McK.-Those are matters
think one should attend to for ones
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-05

straight like woman's hat, When pa
said to hurry the performance TO a
conclusion because he could see that
there was a spirit of unrest in the au-
dience, and he would not be surprised
anv moment to see Virginia secede and
go out of the union.
There was nothing more for me to
do except to drink my cup of after
dinner coffee and smoke my cigarette,
and quit, and ] was patting myself on
the back at my success and squirmlnG
around in my chair, cause the pin IN
my tail hurt my back but / never said
word. The attendant brought in the
coffee and l took a couple of swal-
lows. when | realized that somebody
had put cayenne pepper into it, and |
was hot under the collar, but though
was burning up inside l never
peeped, but just choked and took
swallow of water and vowed to kill the
person that made the coffee.
Kept His Temper
| kept my temper till the trainer
handed me the cigarette and match,
and the first puff / realized that they
had filled the cigarette with snuff, and
after blowing out the smoke l began
to sneeze, and the audience fairly went
wild. l sneezed about eight times, and
at every sneeze the pin i'm my spine
hurt like thunder, but | never lost my
temper. till about the seventh sneeze,
when my monkey mask few off, and
then a boy about my size. right in
front of me, yelled; at amt mon
key at ALL II Is little niger" and he
threw "A ripe persimmon and hit me
right i'm the eye. l said right out i'm
plain English: you're a liar and /
can knock the stuffing out of YOU"
pulled off my dress coat and started
Side ana the monkey trainer on the
other and they tried to get me to re-
turn to the monkey character, and
chatter, and pa put my monkey mask
on me, but l struck right there, and
pulled It off and told him and the man
ayers that / would not play monkey
any more with a tail pinned to my
spine, my stomach full of cayenne pep
per and my nostrils full OF Scotch
snuff, and my face all puckered up
with persimmons.
The crowd yelled; 'Fraudl Fraud!
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-05
Copyright. 1905, by Joseph B. Bowies.)

Copyright, 1906 by Joseph b. Bowes)
Well, I have broke the show all to
pieces, just by not being able to stand
grief. Everything is all balled up, the
managers are sore at me, and afraid
of being sent to Jail, and pa thinks |
ought to be mauled.
1t was this way: When we left
Washington we cut loose from every
home tie. and plunged into Virginia,
and the trouble began at once. We met
a lawyer on the train on the way to
Richmond. and fed him in our dining
car and got him acquainted with all
the performers and freaks, and he told
us that we would have to be careful
in Virginia, cause all the white people
We're first families and aristocratic, and
If any man about our show should
fail to be polite to the white people
they would be shot or lynched. but II
we wanted 10 shoot niggers the game
laws were not very strict about Il.
cause the open season on niggers runs
the year around. but you couldn't shoot
white people only two months In the
year. He said another thing that
scared pa and the managers. He said
II travelling show did not perform all
II advertised the owners were liable
to go to state prison for twenty years.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-05
BY Virginia Niles Leeds

CHARACTERS. ..
Mrs. Harvey Bellinger of Lonelyhurst,
Mrs. Benjamin McKnstry of .Seedy-
Scene: A New York department shop.
M RS. BELL1NGER-Oh, how dye
wv do, Mrs. McKinstry; this is an
unexpected pleasure! I haven't
seen you for perfect age. l suppose
you are in town, just as L am, for a
little shopping?
glad to see you. AS you say, it is a
perfect age. Not since we were both
living in the city. Horrid place. ISM
it? Miserably dirty, dusty streets and
such noise and clatter. The idea of
any one living in the city who can get
away to the cool, clean, lovely coun-
try!
Mrs B.-Ther you are still out in
Jersey? You know. when my husband
heard you were moving there he pre-
dicted that you wouldn't live in the
place six months-that the mosquitoes
would drive you away If nothing else
did.
Mrs Mex. sharply)-Mosquitoes
Why, we never hear of such a thing
in Seedyville! A premium is offered to
any one who can possibly find one! We
positively don't know what they look
like. 1t is the Long Islanders who have
acquaintance with that bird.
Mrs. b. Gn amazement)-The Long
Islanders? oh, but you are quite mis-
taken. That is, don't know about the
rest of the island, but Lonelyhurst is
absolutely free from them. We have
lived there eighteen months and have
never laid eyes on a mosquito in all
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-05

and every possible advantge. 1t is a
grand opportunity and will be sold at
a sacrifice. OF course, if you knew of
a purchaser you would get your COM
mission.
Mrs. B.-Isn't it odd, I was just go
ing to ask you If you knew of anyone
who wanted lovely place with fine
sea air, improved drainage and very
accessible to the city. 1t would posi-
lively never be sold as it is such a de-
sirable place, but the owners want a
little change. If you should hear of
anyone who was on the lookout for
such place-by the way, did mention
that it was on Long Island-you would
let me know, wouldn't you? Thanks.
I'd be ever so .uch obliged! SO nice
to have seen you; goodby Where is
the mosquito netting department, do
you suppose? Yes, so do livery soon
again! Goodby! r,4.
(They part, each rushing headlong
for her train.)
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-05

, that time, except when we have gone
to Jersey to pay visit to my hus-
bands mother. You are really entirely
mistaken. Mrs. McKinstry.
Mrs. McK.-Well, all l know is that
we went to Long Island once for the
summer, but were so devoured that we
had to give up our rooms and let the
landlady sue us for the rest of the
board. The poor baby was one mass
of bites from head to foot.
| Mrs. B. ggestively)-Perhaps they
were not mosquitoes. At all events, 1t
must have been the north shore. / be-
lieve they do sometimes have them
there, but ON our side of the island, as
] said. the creature is entirely un-
known.
/ Mrs. McK.-Aren't you afraid of
Kinstry says it is sure death to live
in such a fiat country.
Mrs. B.-Flat country! Why, we are
on the highest point of ground between
this and Sag Harbof. 1 forget how
many feet-or Is it miles ?-above the
sea level. Every one exclaims who
comes out to see us, "Why, what an
elevation!" And 1t is so. We can see
Long Beach distinctly from our attic
windows, and on clear days, 1 am
sure, with a good glass we could make
out Montauk point. When we bought
the place the real estate man pointed
out to us particularly the enormously
high piece of ground and we had to
pay extra price for it.
Mrs McK.-Well of course, we pre-
fer mountain scenery. There is moth
ing like it in the world, and you can
plainly see the outline of Short Hills
from our cupola. Such a view! You
must certainly come out and see 1t and
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-05

and that each town had men on the
lookout to see that shows didn't adver-
tise what they didn't carry out.
Pa and the managers held CONSUL
tation, and couldn't find that we ad-
vertised anything that we didn't have,
except the ourang outang that we took
on at New York, which eats ana
dresses like a man, cause that animal
got whoopng cough In Delaware and
had to be sent to a hospital but we
heard he was well again and would
join the show in week. Pa asked the
Richmond lawyer how 1t would be II
one of the animals that was advertised
was sick and couldn't perform, and
he told pa the people would mob the
show If anything was left out.
In Richmond
When we got to Richmond the whole
population, principally niggers, was at
the lot when we put up the tents. and
everybody wanted to catch a sight of
Dennis, the ourang outang, and the
posters all over town that pictured
Dennis smoking cigarettes with a
dress suit on. and eating with knife
and fork and a napkin tucked under
his chin, was surrounded by crowds.
II was plain that all the people cared
for was TO see the monk.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-05
Too Good to Be True

A Kenwood lady, while in a poetic
mood the other night. directed her lit
tie daughters attention to the heavens,
saying:
See the beautiful moon. She is the
kind mother, and all those twinkling
stars are her children
After little Gertrude had looked over
the celestial field for a moment she
said:
"Well, l guess Roosevelt amt got no
excuse to scold Mrs. Moon, anyway
Chicago Record Herald.
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-05

The managers held a council of war
and decided the show would be ruined
if we didn't make bluff at having an
ourang outang, so 1t was decided that
was to be dressed up In Dennis
clothes, and put on monkey mask,
and go through his stunt at the after
noon performance.
Gee. but hated to do 1t. but pa said
the fate of the show depended on 1t
and If didn't take the part he would
have TO do It himself, and l knew p'l
wasn't the build OF man to play the
monkey. and so I said ] would do 1t,
but / will never do it again for any
show. The wardrobe woman fixed me
up like Dennis and 1 had seen him go
through his stunt so often | thought
could initiate him, and of course there
was no talking to do, but just to
grunt once in while, the way Den
mis- did. and have an animal look.
Well. sir, the keeper who trained the
ourang outang took me In hand, and
I'm an hour was perfect. / had rub
ber feet and wore black gloves, and
had a tail fastened on with safety
pin that would deceive the oldest
Snowman In the business. When the
crowd was the biggest, In the middle
ring, the keeper led me out of the
nouncement was made by the barker
that Dennis, the educated ourang
outang that had performed before
crowned heads I'm Europe and sap
heads In Newport, the only man-mon-
key In the known world, would now
entertain the most select audience that
had ever been under the tent. Then
/ was dragged into the ring and put
on the platform.
Out on the Platform
They didn't put on my dress clothes
at first, but had little screen on the
platform for me to go behind to dress.
and | appeared first in the natural
state of the ourang outang, with n suit
OF buffalo robe stuff that looked exact
ly like big monkey. l bowed and
the audience cheered. and | stood on
my hands and scratched AT an imagi-
nary flea and pa, who was leaning
against the platform. whispered to me
that / was making the hit OF the sea-
son.
Then the attendants set the table
Los Angeles herald., 1905-11-05

A Newark paper says: There's only
one La Toilette" Yes: and Thanksgiv-
ing's near, so remember it.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1905-12-09
RELEASED BY
THE GRAND
JURY
Four Men Held for the Murder Of
Dock Gully, Given Their
Liberty.

-Four. negroes, all Of whom have
been in the county Jail for the past
month. were yesterday released, the
grand jury, which is now in session
failing to return a true bill against
them.
The negroes, who were Fortune
BenbOe. George Crumb, Fred Lee and
Henry Sheppard, were charged with
the murder of Dock Gully, cOlOTed.
The latter was found dead near Bayou
Texar one morning, and as he had
been in company with the above men
it was believed that he had been muir
by them in a game of dice.
The grand jury, however, after a
most thorough investigation, could
find no evidence that such was the
case, and reported that no true bill
could be found against the negroes,
and they were accordingly released
from custody.
Tt was the opinion that the grand
jury was investigating the case of +.
n Turner, Jr but this case has not
yet been considered by the body Il
is expected. however that the inves-
tigatiOn viii commence this morning,
and that the grand jury viii remain
in session until about Monday.