The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1905-09-20

WARN, WHO Il Sencf
alton ago carried Il
M.nhall p W;lder. tidal wave of huElor
from Maine to Cali
fornia. had Il long, serious face and
would drawl along without giving the
slightest indication of what was com
ing. When the joke was unloaded and
the audience got hold of it he would
look up with seemingly innocent Won
der as to what people were laughing
at. 1t was worth a ten mile walk after
dark on Il corduroy road to heal him
say. II once knew Il man in New Zea-
land who hadn't Il tooth in his head
here he would pause for some time.
look reminiscent and continue "and
yet he could beat Il bass drum better
than any other ma | ever knew"
The Golden Arm"
Mark Twain is another famous hui
nance and hcsitating voice with won
derful effect in 4 story. His tale of
1.-The Golden Arm" was the best thing
Of it's kind | ever heard. Here it is
as he gave it:
'Once pom Il time dey wuz a mon
s'uS mean man. en- he live way out
in de prairie all lone by himself, 'ccp't
he had a wife. En- bimeby she died.
en- he took en- toted her way out da'
in de prairie en- buried her. Well. she
had a golden arm, all solid gold f'om
de shoulder down. He wuz pow'ful
mean-pow'ful-en' dat night he
couldn't sleep 'coze he wanted dat
golden arm so bad.
when it come midnight he couldn't
stan it no mo-, SO he got up, he did,
en- TUX his lantern en- showed out troo
de storm en- dug her up en- got de
golden arm. en- he bent his head down
gin de wind en- plowed en- plowed
en- plowed troO de snow. Den all or a
sudden he stop" (make a considerable
pause here and look startled and take
a listening attitude) ZEN say: My
lam! What's dat?' En- he listen en-
listen, en- de wind say" (set your teeth
together and initiate the wailing and
wheeling singsong Of the wind),
"'BuzZ-Z-zZz" en- den way back yon-
der whah de grave is he hear a voice
all mix up in de win'-can't hardly tell
'em part: Bzzz-zzz-w-h-o-g-o-t-m-y
golden arm" You must begin to
SILVER violently now
EN- he begin to SILVER en- shake en-
say: oh, my! Oh. my Ian: En- de
win blow de lantern out. en- de snow
en- de sleet blow In his face en- most
choke him. en- he start a-plowin' knee
deep toward home, mos dead. he so
sk'yeerd, en- pooty soon he hear de
voice again. m" (pause) at us com
in after him: 'RuzZzZ-Zzz-w-h-o-g-o-t
my g-o-ld-e-n-arm"
Shell Fetch a Yelp.
when he git to lie pasture he hear
1t agin-closter. now N a-comin' back
dab in de dark en- de storm" (repeat
the wind and the voice.. when he git
to de house he rush upstairs, en- jump
in de bed. en- kiver up head en- years.
e II lay dab a-shiverin' en- a-shakin'.
en- den way out dab he hear 1t ag'in,
G IL a-cOmin'! En- bimeby he hear
pause-awed; listening attitude) at
pat pat-pat-hit's a-comin' upstairs.
Den he hear dc latch. en- he knows it's
in de room.
"Den pooty soon he knows it's
standin' by de bed" Nause.D "Den he
knows it's -bendin' down over him
en- he cain't sca'ccly git his brcaf
Dcn-dcn he seem to feel sOmethin'
cold. right down neah agin his head,
Uauscl
"pen de voice say. right at his year
~" 49, n~,,, - =
| You must vail 1t ont plaintively and
a~ccusingly: then You stare steadily and
) impressively into the face of the
f~artlhest gone auditor-a girl. prcfcra
. bly-anl let that W inspiring pause
begin to build itself in the deep hush
When it has reached exactly the righ'
, length, jump suddenly toward that cir
< and yell. "'You're got it,"
) Ii you have got the pause right, shell
; fetch Il dear little yelp and spring ri-A
out Of her shoes. But you must get t.l'
| pause right. and you will find it th'
; most troublesome and ~aggravating an,
: uncertain thing you ever undertook.
One on Depew.
, Senator Chauncey NJ. Depew can TEL
, q new story every day Of the year am
add two or three by way Of good meas
ure. He was billed to make Il Srce>N
and the editor Of the local pape
! called ut his hotel to argue polite
with him. The editor quoted newspa
per statements frequently to supl'r
his arguments. but Depew replied
"Oh. you can't believe everything tn
newspapers say"
After the speechmaking N
, editor and Mr.. Depew met again III Ill
0Onfcr az a crou.l of liSfanorS