davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17
SPEAKERS PREDlCAMENT.
Couldn't Shake with His Right Hand Because It Was Performing
 Important Service.

One of the big New York magazines re- eently sent representative to Washing ton to induce Speaker Cannon to write series of articles on congressional af- fairs, says a Washington letter to the New York American. As the speaker left his seat for his cloakroom, where the magazine man was waiting, one of the ends of his suspenders broke in twain. He gave his left hand to his caller, while holding up his trousers with the other, md asked, dryly and seriously:
 Say, you don't happen to be toting an extra pair of galluses around Tn your pockets, be you?'
 The magazine man didn't. and he said so. Then they both sat down and the speaker was told what was wanted of him.
 No, sir. he sad. 'I haven't the time, anf if l did have it l am neither q I, ter attatorium nor journfi isticum Sorry" and the interview came to close. Then the speaker borrowed a pin, sand. resum- ing his chair, rapped softly with his gavel and said: The house will please be in order @
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17
IT'S THE TERROR
 OF ALL WOMEN.
Bnckncbe Quickly Cured by Dodd's Kidney PfiIs-Mrs. ". II. Ambrose Tells How Her Pains Vasished Never to Return When She
 Used the Great American
 Kidney Remedy.

Dover, Ky, Feb. l3th.-(SpeciaD-So long has Backache been the terror of the women of America that the numerous re- ports of the complete and permanent cures of this ailment now being made by Dodd' s Kidney Pills are causing wide satisfac- tion, and not the least remarkable of these cures is that oi Mrs. ". II. Am prose of this place. Mrs. Ambrose says:
 T had such. pains in my back at times l could hardly move and other symptoms showed that my kidneys were affected. One box of Dodd's Kidney Pills drove away all the pains and l have never been troubled since"
 that theY are out 9e of oTdeT and e need n6e 6ep If they get that help in the form of Dodd's Kidney Pills all will bp well. If they are neglected the disease may de- yelop into Diabetes, Bright's Disease or Rheumatism.
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17

Miss Hattie Henry, Vice President of
 Danville Art Club, 429 Green St, Daa- vile, Va, writes:
 Dear Mrs. Pinkham :-"Manyyear suffer ing with female weakness, inflammation and broken down system made me more anx- ious to diethan to live. butt LydiaE E Pinllham's Vegetable Compound has restored my health and | am so grate ful for it that want every suffering woman to know what Lydia E. Pink
 ham Vegetable Compound will do Tor her"
 When women are troubled with
 irregular, suppressed or painful men, struation, weakness, lcucorrh9a, dis placement or ulceration of the womb, that bearing-down feeling. inhamma- ton of the oyaries. baclzache, bloating, tor fatulency) general debility, indi- gestion, and nervous prostration, or are besct with such symptoms as dizziness, faintness, lassitude, excitability, irri- tability, nervousness slecplessaess,
 melancholy, "all-gone" and "want-to- be-left-alone" feelings, blues, and hope lessness, they should remember there 1 is one tried and true remedy. Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound at l once removes such troubles. No other medicine ill the world has received such
 unqualified endorsement. No other medicine has such record of cures of l female troubles. Refuse to buy any
 other medicine, for you need the best. 1 A light heart, a cheerful countenance, l and all the charms of grace and beauty
 are dependent upon proper action of the
 bodily organs. You cannot look well
 unless you feel well.
 l Mrs. Pinkham invites all sick women ] to write her for advice. Her advice and medicine have restored thousands to health. Address, Lynn, Mass.
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17
FACE LIKE RAW BEEF.
Burning Up with Terrible Itching Eczema-SpeediIy Cured by
 Cuticura.

s"The Cutieura Remedies cured me of a terrible eczema from which 1 had suffered agony and pain for eight long years, be Inp unable to obtain any help from the best doctors, and trying many remedies without success. My scalp was covered with scabs and my face was like a piece ot raw beef, my, eyebrows and lashes were falling out, and l felt as if burning up from the terrible itching and pain. Cuti cura gave me relief the very first day, and made complete cure in a short time. To m: very great joy, my head and face are rev clear and well.-Miss Mary M. Fay, 75 West Main St.. Westboro, Mass"
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17
Crying Need

When a man ia Holland wants the police to stop an automobile that is going too fast-if anything goes fast in Holland the machine IS away across the border besgre he has finished the sentence. fer the name of the automobile in Dutch is snell- paare 70 oszoondeerspoorwegpitroolrijtung. There ought to be a cry among the auto- bubble owners of: Stop the language "- Brooklyn Eagle.
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17
It Cures While You Walk.

Allen's Foot-Ease is a certain cure for hot, sweating callous, and swollen, aching feet. Sold bv all Druggists. Price 25c. Don't acceptany substitute. Trial package FREE. Address Allen $. Olmsted, Le Roy, N. |.
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17

When footpad approaches you seize him by the center ot the arm and press your thumb violently against a nerve in the inner elbow joint. The footpad will then probably shoot five bullet-holes in you while he shrieIss with pain. This IS liu iitsu-St. Louis Globe Democrat
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17

Men are so hungry for office in this country that occasionally one turns up wh6 really wants to be pension commis- sioheF.-kansas City Journal
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17
saIzer,s Home Builder Corn.

So named because 50 acres produced so heavily, that its proceeds built a lovely home. See Salzer's catalog Yielded in Ind. l57 bu., Ohio l60 bu., Tenn l98 bu., and in Mich. 220 bu. per acre. You can beat this record in 1905.
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17
A Guaranteed Cure for Piles.

Itching, Blind, Bleeding or Protruding Piles. Your druggist will refund money if PAzo OINTMENT fails to cure in to l4 days. soc.
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17

They are always talking about lambs in Wall street, but cur experience IS that the lamb there is mighty tough. Indianapolis Sentinel
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17
To Cure a Cold in One Day

Take Laxative Promo Quinine Tablets. All druggists refund themoney if il fails to cure.
 l.. W. Groves signature IS on each box. 25c.
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17
l Zl Q V 00 0
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THESE YIELDS !?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OE TIIEsE YIELDsY l20 bu. Beardless Barley per acre. BIO bu. Salzer's New National Oats per A. so bu. Salzer Speltz and Macaroni Wheat. 1000 bu. Pedigree Potatoes per acre. IA tons of rich Billion Dollar Grass Hay. 60000 lbs. Victoria Rape for sheep-per A. l60,000 lbs. Teosinte, the fodder wonder. 54,000 lbs. Salzer's Superior Fodder Corn
 rich, juicy fodder. per A.
 Now such yields you can have in 1905, if you will plant my seeds.
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17

If some of the people in this and other countries trying to master the new uni versal language would give their time and energy to learning English they would acquire linguistic asset that Is worth talking about The Commoner.
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17

Criticism hurts some people so much that the only thing that sustains them is the absolute knowledge that they are al- ways Flaht-Puck
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17

There are men who finally consent to SC to Work when they cant make living Tn any other way.-Philadelphia Record
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17

He who dreameth may be genius, but he who doeth IS a hero.-N Y. Times
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17

Piso's Cure cannot be too highly spoken O as cough cure.-J W. 0 BTien, 322 Thirc Ave, N, Minneapolis, Minn, Jan. 6. l900
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17

number ot water-wagon passengers are already using their transfers. Mi Waukee Sentinel
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17

Man wants but little here below zero.- Chicago Daily News.
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17

A man often shows his wisdom by keep ing his wit to hmself.-Chicago Tribune
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17

Girls will be girls, all right, but the trouble Is so few of them ever realize an age limit.--Chicago Chronicle
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17
ACHED IN EVERY BONE.
Chicago Society Woman, whs Was So Sick She Could Not Sleep or Eat, Cured by Doan'o Kidney Pills

Marion Knight, of ss N. Ashland Ave, Chicago. Orator of the West Side Wednesday Club, says: This winter
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17
Only q Guess

Baeon-Where do you suppose that 2e3 Meter Hill got Its name?
 :sgbert-Oh, 1 guess that's where the Port Arthur gas works are loeated- Yonkers Statesman.
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17
IT erely Robbery.

''In the business world today there is too mch 'robbing Peter to pay Paul :"
 That wouldn't be so bad. but nine Pauls cut of ten are never paid at that" :" Philadelphia Public Ledger
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17
JUST SEND THIS NOTICE AND loo

in stamps to John A. Salzer Seed Co.,. La
 Crosse, Wis, and receive their great cata- log and lots of farm seed samples. K. L.]
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17

when I started to use Doan's Kidney Pills I ached in every bone and had intense pains in the kidneys and pelvic or gan n S. Tn e Il r in 0 W q s t Il i c k a n d cloudy, and l coul Id barely eat enough to 1.-Two T faIf n
 change for the better within a
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17

week. The second week began eating heartily. began to improve generally. and before seven weeks had passed was well. I had spent hundreds of dollars for medicine that did not help ma, but s6 worth of Doan's Kidney Pills.restored me to perfect health"
 A TRIAL FREE-Address Foster Mifburn Co.,, Buffalo, N. Y. Fee sale by all dealers. Price, 5e cents
The Newark journal., 1905-02-17
Lydia Vegetable Compound FaI
INCLINED 10 be C0NSTIPATED

An American people foods be daily like
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1905-09-05
TOOK The SHEEP BACK.
Collie Dog Evidently Had His Own
Conception Of Duty.

A story of a Scotch collie is cur
rent on the Derbyshire border, says
an English exchange. A farmer In
the Peak district, having purchased
a small flock of sheep in the Low
lands, drove the flock the whole way
from Scotland to his farm In Derby
shire with the aid of a collie dog
which was lent to him by the Scotch
farmer from whom he purchased the
sheep. when you get to your home
with the sheep" said the Scotchman,
"let the dog I'LL his belly; then tell
him to go home" The Derbyshire
man duly arrived at his farm with
the sheep, and was so pleased with
the collie dog and its performance
that he decided to keep 1t few days
before sending 1t back. One day he
was away from home during the whole
Of the day, and on returning in thu
evening he found that the Scotch col
lie was missing, and also the flock of
sheep. In few days tidings came
that the dog had arrived at his Scotch
home and had brought the sheep back
with him.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1905-09-05
A Crucial Moment in History.

Phythagoras had just finished his
lecture decrying the use of meat as
food. Suddenly holding up his hands
as sign that he desired silence on
the part of his pupils, he said:
"And, finally, would add that beans
are fit only for pigs to eat. They
produce stabismus. thus narrowing
the outlook of the consumer, and
cause fatty degeneration of the
mind"
Realizing that he had burned his
bridges in front of him he walked
home, convinced that Boston would
never help to put meaning into his
MISUNDERSTANDING Record-Herald.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1905-09-05
Especially for Women.

Champion. Mich, July 24th.-(Spe-
ciaD-A case of especial interest to
women Is that of Mrs. A. Wellett, wife
of well known photographer here. It
is best given in her own words.
Il could not sleep, my feet were cold
and my limbs cramped," Mrs. Wellett
states. 81 had an awful hard pain
across my kidneys. l had to get up
three or four times in the night. /
was very nervous and fearfully de-
spondent
Il had been troubled in this way for
five years when l commenced to use
Dodd's Kidney Pills, and what they
caused to come from my kidneys will
hardly stand description.
by the time l had finished one box
of Dodd's Kidney Pills was cured.
Now can sleep well, my limbs do not
cramp, do not get up in the night and
feel better than | have in years
owe my health to Dodd's Kidney
Pills"
Women's ills are caused by Dis
eased Kidneys; that's why Dodd's
Kidney Pills always cure them.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1905-09-05
snaiIs Hard to XIII.

Snails are slow even when 1t comes
to dying. and one naturalist who had
mounted shell upon card was sur
prised to find four years later that the
warm water employed in soaking the
she'll off the mount had revived the in
mate, which he had long supposed to
be dried and dead.
Several specimens in another col
lection were revived in a similar man
ner after they had lain in drawer
for some fifteen years. These had not
been glued to card. but had been left
lying loose. and, though frequently
handled, had shown no signs of life.
They were thrown into tepid water
with the idea of cleaning the shells,
but to the surprise of the owner the
snails were found creeping about the
basin when he returned to complete
the task.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1905-09-05
Rose Bush Eleven Feet HIoh.

v. X. STROBE has at his residence,
1857 Kelly street, in South Portland,
what is probably the oldest and larg-
est rose tree in the state and perhaps
in the northwest
The tree stands IL feet inches in
height, has spread across its boughs
of 10 feet 10 inches and measures 10h
inches around the trunk below the
first branch. The first bough is feet
inches from the ground and the tree
is IL years or more of age, having
been planted in its present position
for more than fifteen years.-Portland
Oregonian.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1905-09-05
MraEnma lawyer:

Unless early and correct treatment Is
applied the patient seldom survives
when once the disease Is fastened upon
her. Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable
Compound is the most efficient treat
ment for kidney troubles of women,
and is the only medicine especially
prepared for this purpose.
When a woman is troubled with pain
or weight in loins, backache, frequent,
painful or scalding urination, swelling
of limbs or feet, swelling under the
eyes, an uneasy, tired feeling in the
region of the kidneys or notices brick
dust sediment in the urine, she should
lose no time IN commencing treatment
with Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable
Compound, as it may be the means Of
saving her life. :
For proof, read what Lydia e. Pink.
hams Vegetable Compound did for Mrs.
Sawyer.
=" cannot express the terrible suffering !
had to endure. A arrangement of the female
organs developed nervous prostration and
serious kidney trouble. The doctor attended
me for year, but kept getting worse, until
was unable to do anything, and made up
my mind could not five. I finally decided
pound as a last resort, and | am to-day well
woman cannot praise it too highly, and
tell every suffering woman about my case.D
Mrs Emma Sawyer, Conyers, Ga
Mrs. Pinkham gives free advice to
women address In confidence, Lynn,
Mass.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1905-09-05
Patient, Indeed.

The old colored deacon accosted the
parson on the roadside.
'Pahson," he began, "Ah want TO
ask yo' question. Who was the most
patient man on earf?"
why, bruddah," responded the par.
son, Job was, OBJ cose."
mo, sahi All tell yo' Noah was"
En- how do 20 make dat out?"
why, Noah had two skeeters ON de
ark en- carried dem around fob forty
days en- nights. Eff he cud resist
slappin' ct dem all dat time he was de
most patient man on cart. Chicago
News.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1905-09-05
DO WE TALK TOO mucHr
Opinion Expressed That Americans
Underrate Value OF Silence.

Opinion Expressed That Americans
Underrate Value OF Silence.
In the United States we are prone
to talk too much. We do not sufi-
oiently appreciate the value and beau
ty OF silence.
During the after business hours, ut
the lunch and dinner table we talk on
and on without ceasing, as though
there was nothing worth thinking
about. We invented the first talking
machine. and no American is consid-
cred properly equipped unless he can
talk at all times and upon all sub
jects.
Information must be impaired and
ideas exchanged; 1t is essential to
mental companionship and develops
our faculties of expression. But there
ia no necessity for the endless and
eternal talk in which so many Of us
indulge.
There is great force and value in
silence. 1t enables us to think. 1t
forms and expresses character. The
great men of the world were relative
ly silent men; they talked only when
they had something to say, and the
greatest of them said but very little.
We should study the beauty of ST.
lence and develop our thinking power
rather than our talking power.-Ex-
change.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1905-09-05
NAMES BEST DOCTOR
MIR. BAYssoN PUBLISHES RESULTS
OF VALUABLE EXPERIENCE.
A Former Pronounced Dyspeptic He Now
Rejoioes I'm Perfect Freedom from
Mfseries of Indication,

A Former Pronounced Dyspeptic He Now
ReJoices in Perfect Freedom from
Miseries of Indigestion.
Thousands of sufferers know that the
reason why they are irritable and de-
pressed and nervous and sleepless is be-
cause their food does not digest, but how
to get rid of the difficulty is the pnzzling
question.
Good digestion calls for strong diges-
tive organs, and strength comes from a
supply of good rich blood. For this
reason Mr.. Baysson took DR.. Williams
Pink Pills for the cure of indigestion.
"They have been my best doctor, +" he
says. 81 was suffering from dyspepsia
The pains in my stomach after meals
were almost unbearable. My sleep was
very irregular and my complexion was
sallow. AS the result of using eight
boxes of DIR. Williams Pink Pills, about
the merits of which / learned from
friends in France, have escaped all
these troubles, and am able again to take
pleasure in eating.p
A very simple story, but if it had not
been for DIR. Williams Pink Pills it
might have been a tragic one. When dis
comfort begins with eating, fills up the
intervals between meals with pain, and
prevents sleep at night, there certainly
cannot be much pleasure in living. A
final general breaking down must be
merely question of time.
Mr.. Joseph Baysson is a native of
Aix-les- Bains, France, but now resides
at No. 2439 Larkin street, San Francisco,
Gal, He is one of great number who
can testify to the remarkable efficacy of
DR.. Williams Pink Pills in the treatment
of obstinate disorders of the stomach.
If you would get rid of nausea, pain or
burning in the stomach, vertigo, ner-
vousness, insomnia, or any of the other
miseries of a dyspeptio, get rid of the
weakness Of the digestive organs by the
use of DR. Williams Pink Pills. They
are sold by druggists everywhere.
Proper diet is, of course, great aid in
forwarding recovery once begun, and a
little book, "What to Eat and How to
Eat, may be obtained by any one who
makes a request for it by writing to the
DIR. Williams Medical Co., Schenectady,
NY. This valuable diet book contains
an important chapter ON the simplest
means for the cure of constipation,
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1905-09-05
WHY DO AMERICANS SUCCEED


Why do we lead all the nations of
the earth in prosperity, happiness and
individual contentment?
Why are We as a people, regarded as
an invincible power of impregnable
strength?
And why do we compel the admira-
ton of the whole world-at times
grudgingly given, but given, anyhow?
1t is because we are free and indie
pendent in the truest meaning of the
words.
We think for ourselves, act for our
selves, govern ourselves more than the
people of any other nation.
We are absolutely self-reliarft, a ma
tional trait that renders us independ-
ent of all other nations. Independence
is the keynote of our supremacy.
And this is the reason why up-to-
date grocers and storekeepers appreci-
ate the fact that Americans of both
sexes have strong wills of their own,
and do not need interested advice
Every up-to-date grocer knows per-
fectly well that for more than a quar-
ter of century Lion Coffee has been
the leading package coffee and a well
come drink at the tables of millions of
American homes,
He knows-and everybody else knows
that 1t has always kept it's old
friends and steadily made new ones
Good, reliable, trustworthy grocers
willingly acknowledge this, and all in
dependent housekeepers will insist up
on having Lion Coffee and no other, no
matter what kind of an argument gro
GERS of obstinate principles may adj
vance.
Americans want the best, and they
get the best and purest in Lion Coffee.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1905-09-05
SOLID BODY OF FISH.
Pennsylvania Lake Has Too Many OF
the Finnv Tribe.


Lying between two hills not far
from Hughesville is a small body OF
water known as "Converse's ice dam"
or FISH DAM" that is so full of the
finny tribe that apparently 1t is i'm
possible for fish five inches long to
swim straight The small fish are on
top and the large ones below, and in
order for a fisherman or fsherwoman
to get the bait down to the big fellows
1t is necessary to make hole in the
water and carefully drop the hook
down through the wriggling mass On
June / Mrs. Irwin Converse and Miss
Gladys Koch were at the dam making
determined efforts to hook some of
the under ones. The little fellows on
top, however, made such fierce at
tacks on the bait that their hooks.
time after time, were instantly cleared
as soon as they touched the water.
Many of the little fellows were pulled
out in order to make room for the
hooks, but the task had not been ac-
complished when the reporter left the
Williamsport Sun
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1905-09-05
Cot sven wien Judae sewalI.

Judge Sewall and Joseph Story were
dining together at an inn, when a Jolly
son of Erin appeared at the door and
called for dinner. The landlord told
him he could eat when the gentlemen
had finished.
Let him dine with u.s." whispered
Judge Sewall, land we will have some
fun with him."
The Irishman took his seat at the
table.
you were not born IN this coun-
try?" said Story.
mo, l was born in Ireland"
is your father living?"
mo, sir"
What was his occupatlong"
Trading horses, sir"
did he ever cheat any one?"
Il suppose he did, sir"
Where do you suppose he went tor"
ITO heaven, sir"
Has he ever cheated any one there?"
He has cheated one man, believe"
WAS he prosecutor"
HE was not, SIR"
why not?"
Because they searched the kingdom
OF heaven for a lawyer to take the
case and couldn't find one"
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1905-09-05
The CHANGE In Jim.

They said that Jim was lazy, an he did
appear to be
with me;
He couldn't, like the other hands git
started in the swim;
him.
From there he went to Amosyille an
got in Mortley's shop,
An sailed into the bizness like a reanAr
through the crop.
Took hold of things In earnest-made a
good mechanic, too.
TIL Mort remarked: 81 don't see how he
ever loafed fer you"
An which is why 1 want to say that lots
of laziness
Depends upon the job a man Is worlsin,
at. 1 guess.
Just give man the job he likes. like
Jim liked in the shop,
An nine iae,n times 81 out o ten. guess. the
Detroit Tribune.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1905-09-05
A Profitable sturgeon.

The prize COW sturgeon Of the sea
son was landed at Chester on Tuesday
by Ike Rothwell and a fellow fisher
man.
When drawn the big fish yielded ~
pounds Of roe, which was sold at So
cents pound, netting the fishermen
s46.S0. The carcass, after the roe was
drawn, weighed BAT pounds, which was
sold at Az cents pound, netting
SLIP, the entire sum realized for roe
and sturgeon being $57.92.
From the money standpoint Fisher
man Rothwell and his companion can
claim that they have made the biggest
catch of the season.-Chester (Pa.)
Independent.