davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
rnquiaitIve Rirda.

OF the birds undoubtedly the blue
jays have the most inquisitiveness.
And they are the most noisy in express
ing it, although CROWS will hold close
second place. ifSnot fully the equal.
How the jays screeched and whlstled
and calIed-a confusion of all the
sounds of jaydom-near my homei
More than dozen darted into a small
evergreen tree on the lawn. People
came from several houses In the vicin.
ity, all curious to know what was the
matter with the birds. 1t seemed to
be a want to know" on both sides.
The jays had discovered a cat walking
meckly along by the fence in the low
shrubbery near and under the spruce
tree. There was no nest in the vicinity,
and. so far as could be ascertained, the
cat had not attacked the jays. But
what pandemonium of jay targon
over one meek looking, quiet cat! The
jays outdid themselves and called out
nearly all the occupants OF the many
houses OH that street.-St. Nicholas.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29

One of the most complicated duties
of a wife is the shufiiing OF OF her hus-
bands male friends. says the Ladies'
Field Fifty per cent can go at once,
for half a mans bachelor associates
are. according to his wife. not fit for
polite society, either because they have
no manners or because they wear the
wrong sort of collars. Ten per cent
she may genuinely dislike or possibly
they may not take to her. Some of the
rest are on the borderland of federation.
but most of them have knack of
dropping off by slow degrees. Possibly
this is the inward and spiritual mean
ing of the farewell bachelors dinner
most intending bridegrooms give,
though they never realize it at the
time.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
where Men Are Not Allowed.

On small island in the Greek archi-
pelago there is a colony which is COM
posed entirely of women. 1t is sort
OF religious order which considers it q
disgrace for one of its members to
even look at a man. So, when fish
erman approaches the island the WON
en- pull the gray cowls of their cassocks
over their heads and turn their backs.
Provisions cre never imported, as the
women raise their own products, being
strict vegetarians. Only the matron,
who II annually elected head OF the
colony, Is ever allowed to leave the is
land. The others remain on the island
all their lives. taking their turn at dil-
ing the soil, washing. housekeeping and
fishing.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
A st,ck,er For Et,au.,..

DIR. ThOmnson. master of Trinity col
lege. Camb"itlge. was an exceedingly
cold and arstere man. never taking
much notice OF the undergraduates un.
der his care. On one occasion u Trini-
ty MAN liappened to be out walking
and WAS caught in storm. He ran
across u field and took shelter beneath
large tree. When he arrived there.
lie found, to his horror. that DIR.
Thompson was beneath it. seeking pro
lection from the rain. For some time
both stood silent. watching the clouds.
till at last the undergraduate. growing
desperate. ventured to remark that he
thought 1t was clearing up little.
Sir" said the doctor haughtily, frown-
Ing upon the wretched youth, "all com
munications to the master of Trinity
must be made through the tutors"
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29

Having had SO years of expert.
ence in the manufacture of funeral
goods and carrying 500 caskets in
stock, I have dropped out all the
old factory style, 1 have all new
designs, and am selling all the old
factory styles at net wholesale pri-
ces, il you want that kind.
l am the only manufacturer in
the State that does not wholesale
goods to undertakers-I sell di-
rect to the people. giving them the
advantage of the extra the jobber
has to pay.
You don't have to hire middle
man to watch the shop. l can save
you all the middle man gets, and
give you finer goods for your money
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
To ne.tore Leather nIna,,-..

To restore the leather bindings of
books wash them first very lightly and
carefully with clean warm water In
which a tiny piece of soda has been
dissolved, in order to free the leather
from grease; then wash with clear wa
ter to remove the soda. and dry. Dis
solve bit of gum arabic the size of a
small bean in a teaspoonful of water
and beat it up with teaspoonful of
the white of an egg. With a bit of
sponge go lightly over the leather with
this CLAIR and let it dry.
Should the CLAIR froth up on the
leather. as it is very likely to do if
there is much tool work on the book.
dab it until it subsidies with the palm
OF the hand or with the sponge
squeezed as dry as possible.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
Swallowing Dirt.

This is by Bob Burdette. the
we'll known humorist:
my homeless friend with the
chromatic nose. while you are stir
ing up the sugar in your ten.cent
glass of gin. LET me give yon a fact
to wash down with it. You may
say you have longed for years for
the free. independent life of farm
or. but you never have been able to
get enough money to bny farm.
But there is where you are mista-
ken For some years you have
been drinking a good improved
farm at the rate of one hundred
square feet at gulp. If you doubt
this statement, figure it out tor
yourself. An acre of land contains
43 $50 square feet. Estimating,
for convenience. of the land at 43.
56 an acre. you viii see that il
brings the land just one mill per
square foot. Now pour down the
frey dose and imagine you are
swallowing strawberry patch
Call in five of your friends and
have them help. you gulp down that
500 foot garden. Get on pro.
longed spree some day and see how
long it will take to swallow a past
ure land to feed COW. Put down
that glass of gin; there is dirt in it
three hundred feet of good, rich
dirt. worth $43.56 per acre %
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
when TWO Rainbows Are seen.


When two rainbows are sometimes
seen at once. one outside the other, the
inner or primary bow, as it In called,
is always the brighter, and the red
band of color is always on its outside.
The outer or secondary bow is much
fainter in color. and the red band is
always on its inside. This is because
in the primary bow the suns rays are
only reflected once, while in the sec
ondary bow they are reflected twice,
which makes them fainter in color and
turns them upside down. In one rain
bow we see the rays of the sun enter
ing the raindrops at the top and re-
f1ected to the eye from the bottom,
while in the other we see the rays en-
tering the ratndrops at the bottom and
reflected from the top, whence they
reach the eye.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
Drinkers Barred

The man who drinks cannot
hold an appointive office under
Governor Ranley, of Indiana.
He declares that large corpora
tions rule against men who have
formed the liquor habit, and that
this policy will be adopted in re-.
spect to positions within the gift
of the Executive.
1t is not question how little
or how much man drinks, but if
he drinks at all h cannot receive
recognition at the hands of the
Governor.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
An Island Of n1ack c.t,.

One of the queerest corners of the
earth is Chatham island. of the coast
OF Ecuador. This island lies 600 miles
west of Guayaquil, and the equator
runs directly through 1t. 1t abounds
in cats, every one of which is black.
These animals live In the creYices of
the lava foundation near the coast and
subsist by catching fish and crabs in
stead of rats and mice. Other animals
found ON this island are horses, cattle.
dogs. goats and chickens. all of which
are perfectly wild
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
natacttnr PInted coin.

"For plated coin drop of acid squirt
ed on the edge where the plating wears
most will chew up the base metal in a
hurry" said jeweler.
what acid do you user"
''For gold coin mixture of strong
nitric acid, six and one-half drains;
muriatic acid, fifteen drops, and water,
i've drains, Is used. For silver, twenty
four grains of nitrate of silver and
thirty DROP of nitric acid, with one
ounce of water. One drop is sufficient.
If the coin is heavily plated, we scFape
it little before putting on the acid"
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
Forget Abont Your stomach.

If your digestion is bad the vital
organs of your body are not fed
an nourished as they should be
They grow weak and invite disease
Kodol Dyspepsia Cure digests what
you eat, cures indigestit n and all
stomach troubles You forget you
have stomach from the very day
you begin taking it. This is be-
cause it gets rest-recuperates
and gradually grows SO strong aud
healthy that it troubles you no
more Sold by all druggists
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29

1t is related that Prnnow, the faith.
full servant and personal valet of Prince
Bismarck, once trod on his masters
equity foot. Instead of swearing at
him or even declaring he was q clumsy
fool, Bismarck, noticing that Pinnow
himself was frightened. said: "Consid-
er yourself honored. No other person.
my dear Pinnow, not even the kaiser
himself, would have been suffered to
tread on my corns."
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29

The crown of wofnanhood is motherhood
But uneasy lies the head that wears the
crown OF anticipates this coronation, when
there Is lack of womanly strength to bear
nc burdens of maternal dignity and duty
Ehe reason why so many women sink under
the train of motherhood is because they
are unprepafed.
unhesitatingly advise expectant moth.
ers to use DR.. Rierce's Favorite Prescrip-
tor szsites Mrs !. W. c. Stepheus, of Mia
NOT nIlt1 beTia<ld CO., Va. The reason for
5ll1f 1dv1ce IS hal Or Pierce > 4 ~
isetIptlon Is the best preparative for the
maternal function. No matter how healthy
and strong a woman may be, she cannot
use Favorite Prescription as a prepare
tive for maternity without gain of health
and comfort. But it is the women who are
not strong who best appreciate the great
benefits received from the use of rFavoritc
Prescription For one thing its use makes
the babys advent practically painless 1t
has IN many cases reduced DAYS of suffer
ing to few brief hours. It has changed
the period of anxiety and struggle into a
time of case and comfort.
The proprietors and makers of Doctor
Pierce's Favorite Prescription now feel
fully warranted in offering to pay $500 for
any case of I-eucorrhea, Female Weakness,
Prolapsus, or Falling of Womb, which they
cannot cure. All the Worlds Dispeusary
Medical Association, Proprictors. of Buff
falo, N. Y. ask is a fair and reasonable
trial of their means of cure.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
A Mussy Cook.

I cd make chocolate cake m a
king might eat off o. my cuffs m col
lar when was through, but what sur
prised me about your chocolate cake.
Mrs. Lathrop. was t you didn't get
into the oven with 1t in the end. for
I'll take my Bible oath g you had IS
much on you IS on any pan.-"Susan
Clegg and Her Friend, Mrs. Lathrop," !"
by Anne Warner.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
The Green Cap Of the Bankrupt

There was a law in force in France
for a century or more that compelled
bankrupts to wear green caps. This
being imposed. upon by such as were
unable or unwilling to pay. Success
sive edicts enlarged the privileges of
bankruptcy, but they forfeited them
II they appeared in public without
green caps. II thsse who cannot OF
will not pay their debts were COM
PEELED to wear such caps at the present
day the streets OF most OF our cities
would have rather . verdant appear
anco.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29

Cats, according to the old tradition.
have nine lives. but they are not the
only creatures that enjoy such a pIu-
raltty. Infusorta have been dried sid
restored to life by moistening after re-
naming inert dust for twenty-seven
years. and the drying resuscitation has
been successfully tried eleven times on
one lot of rotifers. Frogs and many
fishes suffer no injury from freezing
solid, while in few cases even warm
blooded animals have been restored to
life aftsr apparent death from frooe-
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
Three Large Juicy Plums Handed


Washington, March Three
West Virginia gentlemen were
recipients recently at the hands of
the President. of some lucrative
positions. viz:
Elliott Northoott, Huntington,
collector of internal revenue for
the district of West Virginia.
George Q Mcintosh, of Fayette-
vile, counsul general to Beuuos
Ayres.
John snodgrass, Of Wheeling.
CONSUL to Praetoria. South Africa.
The two last named gentlemen
are newspaper men. one the editor
of the Fayette journal, weekly,
the other of the Wheeling Tele
graph.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
he pidnr Like Her.

Look here" suid the sour faced
lady who had answered his personal" /"
your ad. is fake. 1t distinctly stat
ed, object. matrlmony'"
''Well-er-um-you see." faltered
the man nervously. ''there was some
mistake. The printer omitted word.
The ad. should have read. Object to
matrimony.'"-Town Topics.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
Rhe Right Name isDeWitt.s.

DeWitt.s Witch Hazel Salve
cools, eoothes and heals outs, burns,
boils, bruises. piles and all skin dis
eases. K E Z.okefoose, Adolpb, w
Va. says: my little daughter had
white swelling SO bad that piece
after piece of bone worked out of
der leg" 1t is the most wonderful
healing saIve in the world Beware
of counterfeite Sold by all drug
gists
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
cried An tha rin.

Mother-Tommy. what's the matter
with your little brother? Tommy
He's crying because Pm eating M
cake and won't give him any. Mother
is his own cake finished? Tommy
Yes'm. and he cried while was eating
that too.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29

The case of six generations living is
given by Tennyson thus: Daughter.
arise; thy daughter to her daughter
take whose daughters daughter crieth. .
George Hakewill. in the seventeenth
century. had imagined one descent
more. for In his .-Apologie" he writes
that the mother said to her daughter,
Daughter. bid thy daughter tell her
daughter that her daughtefa daughter
hath a daughter" a credible injunc-
tion in the case of centenaFian only.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
InherIted.

"What a cool and Indifferent air Miss
Frappay has! She acts just as II she
didn't know that anybody was looking
at her"
ayes: she inherits that. Her mother
Qsed to bake pancakes in the window
Of a quick lunch restaurant'-Cleve-
land Plain Dealer.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
Too Long Fer HI. Bunk,

During the American civil war there
was an assistant surgeon in the navy
six feet four inches high, who was
serving on board the Penobscot, which
was only five feet eight inches between
decks. The doctors bunk was scant
six feet in length. so that he was un-
comfortable even in lying down. In
bad weather. on the blockade, when
the spray was breaking over the ship
the doctor was deprived even of the
comfort of uncoiling on deck After
considering the matter thoroughly and
remembering that long letters to the
department were not always read and
not always considered, he wrote as
follows:
Hon Gideon Wells Secretary of the
sir-Length of surgeon. 6 feet &: height
of wardroom. feet g. Respectfully.
E. C. YER MULLEN.
Assistant Surgeon.
The department promptly dispatched
him until such time as more suitable
ship could be found for his assign
ment."-Chicago News.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
He Heard Ten Ma.

"Your hair isn't wet" said little Tom
my to Mr.. Flyer, who was calling.
mo. of course not! What made you
think my hair was wet? he asked.
very much surprised.
81 heard pa tell ma that you couldn't
keen Yonr head ahnvs wafer"
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
A friend tells us We should saw

A friend tells us We should say
nothing at all when we cannot say
pleasant things alone. The senti-
ment is pleasant one to act on
but if one always strictly adhered
to it would mean that the truth
would be sadly ignored. The sem
-timent is all right for jelly fish
men.=WelIville Herald.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
Keep Your Temper.

The unwritten laws both OF society
and good manners are innumerable.
but there ls one that we cannot pass
over In silence, and that is-never lose
your temper. This applies especially
when playing games. To lose ones
temper in private is bad enough, but
to do so in public is unpardonable. 1t
is crime which no hostess can for
give, for it makes all the other guests
feel uncomfortable and disturbs that
outward calm which is the essence OF
all mod society.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
. strIct Gramn,arian.

''You think great deal of your bus
band. don't you?" said the visiting
relative.
You have the wrong proposition" :"
answered Mr.. Meekton's wife. with the
cold tones of the superior woman. "I
think for him."'-Washington Star.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29

The English language, WrlIre or
respondent to the London Globe. con-
'ains the three words, to. too and two.
sounded alike. Now, it is easy to say
There are three to too two's in Eng
lish," but how would you write it,
using one of the words only? That
is. would the plural be "to's," ''too's'
or 6two'sY"
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29

The teacher told Elsie to name the
large bodies OF water. She had been
absent the day before and hadn't
lenrned the definition of sound. She
thought she remembered the name,
and she recfted. "Oceans, bays, gulf,
straits and-and noises"
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
son,etbiue wo.

Rivers was smoking cheap cigar.
Seems to me-" said Brooks. 81 smell
something like cloth burning"
But Rivers was game.
He touched the lighted end of his
cigar to his shirt sleeve.
NO wonder" he said, exhibiting the
burned spot.-Chicago Tribune.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
Won a Name of Fame.

DeWitt's Little Early Risers, the
famous little pills. have been made
famous by their certain yet HARM
less and gentle action upon the
bowels and liver. They have no
equal for bilionsness, constipation,
etc They do not weaken the stom-
ach, gripe, or make you feel sick.
Once used always preferred. They
strengthen. Sold by all druggists
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
A Trleds ana True Friend.

One Minute Cough Cure con.
tains not an atom of any harmful
drug,and it has been curing coughs.
colds. Group and whooping cough
30 long that it has proven itself 70
be tried and true friend to many
who use it Sold by all drnggiste
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
More to the Point.

Hicks-I suppose you heard that our
house was robbed?
Wicks-Yes. 1 understand the way
the thieves ransacked the place simply
beggared description.
Hicks-Not only that, but It very near.
" beggared me-Exchange.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
EnrautnIIeh.

Crook (eenialIyl-By Jovei I'm glad
to see you. neighbor. How are yoo,
and how are all the folks7 How
Farmer Broadhead 6grimly) wa-al,
young man, what's your little game
green goods or runnin' for of1iceT-
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29

Sportsman (from the bog)-Confound
you. didn't you say there was sound
bottom here? Shepherd-Zo there be.
maister. but thou 'aven't got down to
un yeti-Punch.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29

IFS a mistake to marry too young"
remarked the wise guy.
''Well. at any rate, it's mistake
that isn't often repeated" murmured
the simple mug.-Philadelphia Record.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29
A cynie ON Marriage

s'Of course a bachelor knows more
about marriage than married man."
says Malthugavinius, the medieval
eynic. 1.-THE best proof OF this PROPOSE
tion Il that the bachelor did not mar
ryr
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29

When. his wife's mother comes ON
her first visit a man has the same feel
ing as If there were private detective
in the house.-Atchison Globe.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29

Too much sensibility creates unhap-
piness; too much insensibiIity creates
cripe.-Talleyrand.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29

have in stock full line of Me.
talic Caskets and Zinc and Copper
lined. A full line of Metallic Grave
Vaults I make a full line of Couch
Caskets in all styles. Ny child
ren's Caskets are much finer than
any others and all new designs, and
cannot be bought outside.
L WILL PAY
all ferrisges, furnish horse feed:
give you your dinner and deliver
all goods free of charge. Drive
your teams over, I will pay your
fare by rail or street car, give you
better attention and save You
money.
Having doubled the Undertak-
ing in Mason county caused me to
buy property and build in Mason
City, an Undertaking room and
Office, and a fine stock of finished
woork for the Mason county trade
will be kept on hand. with a fine
HearseS Undertakers Wagon, Hack
and Four Horses. You will find a
man to wait on you and give
prompt attention to all customers
at Mason City and the surround
ing country. At New Haven Mr..
VIM. Allen will attend to the trade.
1 nave on hand 100000 Perfec-
tion 1Sin. Washington Red Cedar
Shingles at reduced price. 200.
600 No. 2 ashington Red Cedar
16 in. shingles at 8 so per thou
trnd. 200 600 White Pine Is in
shingles at a reduced price. 15O.-
Geo. White Hemlock shingles lsin.
No. ], at 81 90 per thousand. 100.
600 Plastering Lath at reduced
price.
Hardware. Paints. Sash and
Doors.
3. r. BIGGs,
POHdEROH. OHIO.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29

: A remarkable case in which Daniel
O'Connell appeared was one in which
a man was charged with murder. The
evidence went all against the prisoner.
When the time came for the defense
to be made it was announced, "Tbe
murdered man will now be called"
The supposed victim went into the box
and satisfied the court as to his identi-
ty and existence in flesh. The judge
directed the jury to return formal
verdict OF not guilty. but the good men
and true insisted on retiring and did
so. Presently returning, they found
the prisoner guilty Heavens, gentle
men," said the judge, .'of what is he
guilty? Not murder, surely?" mo.
m'lord," replied the foreman. 'sbut if
he didn't murder the man he stole my
old mare three weeks ago"
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1905-03-29

When a man has greatness thrust
upon him he has mighty little inclina-
don to dOdge.-Puck.