West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1905-04-06
Is Pleased to Know That the People
in Preston Are Taking Such
GREAT INTEREST IN HIS WELFARE.
When he Returns Home Proposes
to Dine comrads Lee Shaw
on Quail on Toast.
erisved to Hear That comrade John
Duvall Has Quit Fiaaling and
Gone to Preaching.

IL Is truly n source OF great
pleasure to me to know that my
friends back in Preston are taking
such great interest in my welfare,
and that they do not b.grudge me
the pie that Gov. Dawson has pro-
vided me with, which have hen
estly earned in my forty odd years
of hurrahlng for our distinguished
Governor. am in duty bound to
keep up my yelling for the Govern
or il have to strain the yeller.
People who have arrived from
Preston tell me that my old Com
rade Shaw points TO my record at
Charleston with pride. They tell
me that he never tires of telling the
country people, who drop into his
sanctum to exchange their country
produce for the Leader, that / am
the only ruralist who has achieved
fame in the journalistic field. l
feel grateful TO Comrade Shaw for
his compliments, and when l return
home we shall dine on quail on
toast, over few bottles of cham
pagne, which will eliminate the pew
tax laws from our memory for the
time being. l have INDUCED in
several elminators since l have
been in Charleston.
| was somewhat grieved to learn
from the people at home that my
oil | comrade and messmate, Major
Orr, was having trouble locating
Oil Speck. The Major is not as
spry as he was VIXEN he and l were
army boys together. In those days
we located Old Speck on the neces-
sity plan. When everything else
failed We put Comrade lIez Miller
on the trail. He was equal TO any
greyhound on the scent. If there
was any Old Speck within ten miles
of the camp Comrade Hez could
always get near enough to sprinkle
It'll. salt on her tail The Major
had Hez detailed as his chicken
guard, the only. chicken guard, so
far as | can learn, that was in either
army. Comrade Hez should be
granted an extra pension for such
heroic work in crushing the Rebel
lion. II ever am so fortunate as
to get to Congress will have a
special act passed allowing him $roo
per month and chicken three times
day so long as he lives.
1t was a great surprise to me to
hear that my old comrade, John
Duvall, had quit fddling and gone
to preaching. This could never
have happened had remained at
home. Still 1 am happy to know
that Comrade Duvall has joined the
army of the Lord. He should
make an excellent exhorter. He
has wonderful lung power, and when
fully inflated should be heard for
miles. No sinner will escape his
roar, which will be equal to a clap
OF thunder from a clear sky. When
he gets his lung power tested to its
full capacity | shall return home TO
hear him. Gov. Dawson and 49,.
self have already arranged TO place
him on the stump in the next cam.
paign to lead the spellbinders. We
shall need spellbinders with a great
er volume Of voice in the next cam
paign. for the enemy is already at
work organizing an army to attack
our new tax laws like Field Marshal
OYamS has attacked the Russians.
We do not want the new tax laws to
suffer the defeat that the Russians
have. If they do, our days Of pie
dom will come to a sudden and
tragic end.
At a conference which we held
the other night it was decided to ap-
point Bro. Lamar &. Powell Of the
West Wirginian, Annihilstor, and
start him in pursuit Of the Insur.
gents, who got away from as in
Charleston, and have returned to
the mountains. II any one can run
them down Bro. Powell can. lie
is as bold as a lion and as fierce as
hyena lie tells us that there is no
such word as "fcar" in his lexicon.
His attack on the Insurgents in the
Legislature warrants the assertion.
We shall expect great things from
Bro. Powell Every one in Marion
county fears him, not excepting
Bros. Owen Mckinney ana Earl
Smith. Tom Parks Fleming told