West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1905-01-05
BONSER'S ONE DAY.
lie Remains at Home for Day 10
Straighten Things Out In the
NcighbCrhOOd.

onds. To Mrs. Bowser's surprise
he sat down to his cigar and seemed
to have forgotten that it was week
day. She waited for ten minutes
and then asked if he was going to
take day off.
That is what am going to do,
he replied.
Are you going fishing or any
thing
No, ma'am am going to stay
right around the house and straight
en- things out There are quite
number of things that ought TO be
attended to, and I've been thinking
of taking day off for sometime.
Mrs. Bowser didn't ask what
things he meant, but awaited deve-
lopments with a presentiment that
the day would be made lively after
his own peculiar style. She had
not long to wait for the beginning.
One Of the works of art in Mr..
Bowser's front yard is stone dog
in an attitude of repose, The art
ist meant the dog to repose, and the
dog had always been willing, but
the hoodlums passing by had other
ideas. One of their favorite amuse
ments is to enter the yard and stand
the dog upright, or whirl him over
his back. In order to keep peace
in the family, Mrs. Bowser and
the cook have stood ready to turn
the dog back as often as he was
turned over and said nothing about
it. An hour after breakfast on this
particular morning three half grown
boys came along and decided to
stand the dog on his head. They
did not reckon beyond a waive of
the broomstick and a mad protest
from the cook, and Mr.. Bowser
found them easy prey when he sud
denly rushed down the front steps
and upon them. He posed them
in 10 different attitudes in about a
minute and half and when they
got out of the yard a summer stock
of all straw hats, buttons and home
made suspenders mingled with the
stone dog to add picturesqueness to
the scene.
Mr.. Bowser had hardly got over
painting from his exertions when the
vegetable man called-one of the
20 vegetable men passing through
the street daily. He called from
his wagon on the street from the
curbstone from the gate-from the
basement windoy. He announced
that he had beets, potatoes, onions,
radishes, cucumbers, asparagus and
beans, and that the same were of
h S o. n raising, and he stuck
TO his text for 10 long minutes.
Then the basement door suddenly
opened, and he was looking tor the
cook to appear and buy out his
whole load when Mr.. Bowssr step
ped forth and began performing.
He also caused the vegetable man
to perform. Beets, potatoes, rad
ishes and cucumbers darkened the
air, while asparagus, onions and
beans covered the lawn and told
Of beautiful harvest.
The vegetable man had been left
an orphan at an early age and had
learned to depend upon himself,
but he was caught in the food and
swept off his feet and rolled
over and over until he was clear Of
the yard. When he finally return
ed to consciousness he was seated
on his wagon and was a half a mile
away shouting "coal" instead of
Vegetables"
Mr.. Bowser sat on the front steps
with the cat besides him, when a
tramp who was working" the
block espied him from across the
street and decided that he had
struck the sof,est thing Of the sea
son. Coming across the street and
leaning upon the gate he pathetcaJ.
ly inquired
Boss, can you tell me IT Chris.
tian family lives here ? By the
looks Of things they do, but am
not sure and don't want 70 make
any more mistakes.
Mr. Bowser had no reply.
ia Christian family does live
here, continued the tramp as he
partly opened the gate, then ] want
20 say that haven't had any,hipg
to cat for two whole days, and I'm
going TO apply for a crust Of bread.
IF there are no crusts lying around
IJl take a dime instead. 7 am no
hog 90 want all family has qot