The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-04-25

fugitive VERSE; "Al right said
the editor YEARLY, "Iet it fy!"-Town
and Country.
"violet has married one man out of
a thousand 'Weu. the law won't
allow her to marry any more: what
do you expect ?''-Judge.
"Briefs was sure that the experts
testimony would clear his client"
Eyes: but unfortunately it was under
stood by the jury."-Brooklyn Life.
How shall we move the Masses"
asked the temperance orator. Just
then somebody in the outskirts of the
crowd, remarked: Come out and
have a drink. boys!' and the masses
moved -Me-Up.
DO you think that republics are
ungrateful?" Well answered SEN
ator Sorghum, they may be more or
less ungrateful, but they are not
necessarily unremunerative." - Wash
ington Star.
stella-Oh, yes, he is an Indian.
Bella-Why do you call him an
Indian?
stella-He is always on my trail
Boston Traveller
"see here" exclaimed the irate pur-
chaser to the typewriter agent, didn't
you tell me the machine you sold me
was so strong you could drop it out of
a window, go down and pick it up,
and go right to work on it?'
ct did,
well. it fell out of the window ac-
cidentally yesterday, and had to send
it to the repair shop
well, you could have gone right to
work on it yourself if you'd known
how to set about fixing it. couldn't
you ?"-New Orleans Times-Demo-
crat.
81 don't see how he can put in all
his time at golf
Wen. I believe he's not busy at the
Not busy at the office? why.
Hes too busy at golf."-cleveland
Leader.
She's a distant relative of mine"
Distant! Why man. she's your wife,
''she was. but she's been married
twice since then. She's my wife twice
removed. boston Traveller.
Asker-Where do you meet the queer
looking people you draw in your funny
picturesg
Comic Artist-oh, here and there.
don't have to go very far to see one
Boston Post.
He-How did I look in my dress suit
at the dinner last night?
She-TO tell you the truth YOU didn't
look bit comfortable in it It viii re-
quire time for you to acquire the who'll
ly-at-home appearance Of one of those
walters, for instance.-Boston Tran
script-
Struck It ht.-Krankleigh-Ye I
am seldom fooled on a point of physi-
ognomy. Now that man yonder-I new
l.
he has to shoulder heavy responsible
ties. Pardon me, sir, but would you
mind telling US your occupation?
The Unknown-Shoor not. OF carry a
hod!-CIeveland Leader.
Miss Plane-"Now. get as pretty
picture OF me as you possibly can
Photos RAJ s- fear, ma'am;
know yourself. New Yorker.
Why not accept all the money Mr..
Rockefeller wants to give away, and
thus prevent his using it to stife COM
petition and individual enterprise?-
New York American.
Seven hundred Democrats attended
the New York Jefferson banquet They
go to the food much better than to the
polls.-Washington Times.
Or. Osler suggests an export tax on
girls Why not an export bounty on
medicos?- New York World.
II the women OF the country can
stamp out Mormonism, the politicians
who have vainly tried the experiment
must take off their hats and bow low
Washington Star.
It may be that the vegetation which
binders the progress Of the ships Of the
Russian feet is merely the whiskers
that have grown on the admirals.-St.
Paul Globe
Some men pray for their friends and
some others prey upon them.-Chicago
News.
There's one thing we can be thank