The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-08-26
A HONEYNOON CONVERSATION
The Price of Wife Discussed BY Helen RoDand Author
Of {" The Digressions of Polly. -
Copyright by Helen Irene Lutz. !

''Isn't it difficult said Polly, "to
want them both?'
The jewelers. clerk smiled patiently
Snd l shifted my weight to the other
foot. Polly slipped the ring on her
finger and hung the jeweled cross about
her neck.
1T haven't known that feeling" I
whispered in answer to Polly's ques-
ton, "since met you. Before that it
was chronic-'
"Of course interrupted Polly, 'the
ring is more valuable, because 1t is more
expensive; but the cross is prettier--.''
ooh, as to the expense | replied,
"there is very little difference in that.
1t consists merely in the fact that
shall pay outright for the ring, while
nobody knows how much / shall finally
expend il replacing lost settings and
buying chains, and putting new clasps
on the cross 1t is very much like the
difference between purchasing an ori-
entail and an American wife. The first
you pay for in spot cash, and are done
with the bargain; while the second
is lifelong investment into which you
sink treble the money
The clerk grinned approximately. l
decided that he had been married. -,
ter in her eye that shamcd the dia-
monds, elf you think either gift too
expensive-for your wife, and have
changed your mind about
"Excuse me- said the clerk, II
have something prettier in the safe, -
and FASTENED away, as the de trop
should always do. at such moments.
rPolly,' | said, reprOachfully, that
was unkind. Nothing is too expuensive
that is worth the money-not even a
wife. You did not give me time to ex-
plain that while the American wife
costs more in the long run, she is like
the cross, very much prettier and, like
the ring, very much more valuable
than the oriental wife,
gan twisting her fingers to make the
37If You put it that way she re-
piled, smiling up a. me from beneath
the rim of her hat, it s not really so
bad. But it sounded as, it you were
comparing me with one of those stupid
little Japanese girls that are bought and
"impossible! I cried. "There is
nothing stupid about the American girl
and I defy the father who would at
tempt to sell her outright. She sets
her own price and goes to the highest
bidder of her own free will. She
knows her exact value and whether to
automobile or to accept diamond ring
and trip to Niagara falls, She ap-
praises herself with the keenness OF a
pawnbroker, and she doesn't sell out
for one penny less than her cash value
until she begins to see that she is get
ting rusty and going out of fashion"
"And then I suppose she puts her
self on the bargain counter with the
rest of the old maids and-and widows
with encumbrances,' reioined Polly
90 "ExactIv?," I agreed, "and now will
you have the cross or the ring?'
"It is perfectly horrid of you,' pur-
'Fto talk of matrimony as tho it were
an auction sale, and OF girls as tho
they were usurers. 1t makes love seem
lust like the shine on the iewels-in-
stead of the whole thing
"Well isn't the shine on the Jewels
the whole thing after all, Polly?" J.
asked, turning the cross until it gilt
of the price, or the weight, or the value
of the ring or the wife-after the bar
gain has be IN closed.'
GLOW much did I cost?' asked Polly
suddenly.
"Now, Polly" I pleaded.
"How much did I cost?' repeated
Oily lItAOIdDlS.
took seat on the stool beside her
and began counting on my fingers. ,
NWell, let me see,' I commenced
thoughtfully, "first one diamond ring,
hundreds Of boxes Of Huylers. enough
theater tickets to make a bonfire, sup
pers and dinners and luncheons that
would have, fed the Newsboys' home
for year,
"Ugh!" interposed Polly, "and to
think you kept count!'
"a lot Of wedding souvenirs I
continued, ga house and garden and
the price Of a cook and a gardener, one
club
cone what9' cried Polly.
Zone club-which I have lost for
ever,'' continued dreamily, "half a
dozen hirtations, which were proving
very interesting, and all my bachelor
friends, to say nothing of shoes and
hats and chiffons, and jeweled crosses
and--and-'
"And you re still paying" cried
Polly gleefully.
"And I'm still paying,'' repeated
sadly.
"I'm SO glad!" announced Polly.
"Glad?' I inquired in an injured
tone of voice.
"That I did cost a lot,' replied
Polly. ell was afraid I had sold out