The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1905-05-24
With the Long Boz.
"Eye nature,s walks, shoot foL!

L b Il
eye IT flies"
MRS. MAVERICK is suffering from housemad's knee
lVl due to her work in the English prison We had
slight attack of lawnmowers knee complicated by wheel
barrows this week.
This outrage Of interfering with the tariff makes pretty
mad Everybody knows that the tariff immense help to
us fat boys who 100000 in the
Adirondacks
Speaking opinions and speculations, there is
one thing the truth that always liked No matter
what people think say about it. the truth is always the
If it were not the truth, it wouldn't be So
The Georgia peach shows signs Huh! speaking of
peaches you should see the new stenographer.
"A dose of Ibsen administered to ST. Louis leaves the
critics of this wondering which is enjoyable
that, to be cowkicked.
young business who taking the Doctors prescrip
ton golf for his health stopped with his forehead last
week hot pill travelling like comet He says the cap
sue suddenly appeared out of and smote him without
warning If had struck inch to the left his doctor told
family would this week be cheerfuy drawing his life
This to show that go like croquet has It's
dangers.
They are carrying insurance far in England that
Engishman limited insured against twins.
He had married into rather prolific family and there
prospects, He sent his broker to Of Lloyd underwriters
The underwater set acuary to look the vital sta
stcs and make few calculations Then for the Of Is
gunea he insured the gentleman FL against the advent
of twins. The insurance company won. ... 49,.
The Vernon Center News man has made to eat the
chickens that scratch in his garden but is bothered at the
presence of non-edble dogs. The only for dog
garden is to stop half brick Fl: -.
old climaologcal friend x. Y sends the fol-
lowing bit of classic English:
probably thunder approaching and is
due shortly. Winds will becoming north west and
afraid will be quite cool for flowers during latter part of
week. Will not surprise to hear from frost west of
here in this vicinity. Weather should clear by Friday.
This is something in line with the government and if
not entirely right may not be completely wrong
A New York wanted divorce because her hus-
band had gone Of style. Why shouldn't who
desires be in style follow the fashions husbands in
other things9
Reports rife of parties who going Europe for
little outing Some of would like to two three
hours and get peep at Minnehaha Falls.
theatrical manager told the Fargo Forum how Irish
stage hand destroyed quantity Of costly Autographs The
busy behind the when the
brought in He called the stage hand and ordered him
place them in the foyer.
Entering the theater in the evening he noticed that the
Autographs not visible he sent for the attendant and
asked him where they WERE ..-s-s2:,
<''Shure burnt thin, sor.'' ~. : E* - a. ~:
''Burnt them, you idiot, what for?"
''Bekase yer hammer tould to do Ye tole to
put them in the foyer and went right off an put thin in
the stove beyant.'' "5....@ ~-
The Sheldon Progress jubilee week is rendered still
obeoyful by the relegaton of the old Washington hand
the heap Its place will be taken by cylinder
press the railroads do not slip up The Progress editorial
force will thus be free devote to other purposes whole
lot Of time and that in past have been
absorbed each week by that ARMSTRONG; press.
The old fashioned hand for exercise and it
has in the past naturally put premium rushing the
For after editor has pulled off 1900 copies of his paper
each pull representing the lifting of about 100 pounds of
coal foot from the floor he feels that the world
not him for dipping his face into pint of beer he
will have to get along with its condemnation is will
ing concede his editorial columns that beer as rule
poisonous and sometimes contains deeerious ingredients
ducing Bghs Disease and other minor Irregularities but
after he has pulled Armstrong; press for few hours
begins feel that death has few Now that the
is discarded there will be further need for the liquid
Thus does progress incidentally assist the enforcement
the prohibition law -.--A. j. R.
Il N/Luk TXIonsno.~ TT/~yn.4 II. T..o-.