The Evening statesman. [volume] (Walla Walla, Wash.) 1903-1910, 1905-07-15
J1m1nnle6oy In Tyustland
By JOHN KENDR/Ch RANcc
new acquaintance slowly. "wbat,s b;s

new acquaintance slowly. What's his
grudge"
F.! wen, you see. we used to be chums-
me and the Tom Tom," said the Anal
SaIilated copper. Fact is, we used
10 steep together and use the same but
ION nook, and when he couldn't find
MS own clothes her wear mine. and
vice versa. And he introduced me To
lot O people and made all sorts o.
promises of what I'd do for 'em. and all
lhat. Being a copper. everybody had
d sort OF an idea that l was ricn. like
those cops down in New York with
pockets full O. thousand dollar bills
and all sorts O. by-products coming In
on the side all the time. He told one
man that I'd give him a million a wear
and he got a lot of widders and or
plants to believe that for every dollar
they gave him on my account ia hand
out seven dollars and forty-seven cents
a week."
And you didn't do it," said Jimmie
boy.
Not exactly" said the Amalga
mated Copper I'm a charitable old
cuss, young man, but 1 amt the Iron
BESIDES, like all Coppers, l have to
divide with the man higher up, and by
the time the Commissioners get their
snare tnere were darned few steam
yachts left for the widders and or
phants.'
Il see,' said Jimmieboy. you were
victim of circumstances over which
you had no control"
That's it," said the Amalgamated
Copper with an admiring glance at
Jimmieboy The spirit was willing,
but the flush was weak wasn't
flush enough, so l didn't do all the
Tom-Tom said 1 would, and he got
mad. We got separate apartments and
used separate shoe horns, and ne stop
ped introducing me to his friends 1
referred him to the Commissioners,
and they tried to explain the situation
to him, but he wouldn't hear 'em, and
the first thing 1 knew they ordered
him off the place.
And did ne go?" asked Jimmieboy.
NO" replied the Amalgamated Cop
per- Il had to kick him off myself
all in the line of duty, though. l hated
to do it. I couldn't forget all the nice
poems he had written about me when
we were friends, and he had 'em pub
lished at his own expense, too. One
Of 'em went like this
Give me no valiant General,
All covered DER with gold;
Give me no Sergeant Major, dressed
In steel suirass so bold
Give me no julius Caesar; no,
Nor Bonaparte from Joppa.
l stake my life, in peace or strife.
On 'Malgamated Copper.
THAT was the one that won all the
widders and Orphants," continued the
Amalgamated Copper, with sigh.
and the Tom-Tom wrote it with his
left hand-the one nearest his heart
but 1 had to kick him out just the
same. The Commissioners ordered me
to and there was no nelp for it, and
out he went"
And. so he's down on you, eh?"
said Jimmieboy.
That's the idea," returned the
Amalgamated Copper. He's been try
ing to get me in his clutches ever since.
Fortunately, mine is a pretty big beat
'I-Pm the biggest beat of the bunch
and so far l have been able to elude
him, and, furthermore, he always trav-
els around with a brass band so that
you know when mes in the neighbour
hood, only sometimes they play soft
and low, so that you can't be quite
sure just where hell strike from, and
it keeps me on the jump, 1 can tell
you. I run all the way from Seventy
second street up to 148th, and back
again. trying to keep out of his way,
and the worst part of it is it makes
all the others nervous. The people up
at the Gas Works, for instance, hardly
know where they're at. / shouldn't
be surprised if the Armourdillo and
the Iron Pig and the rest of that crowd
would be glad to see ME knocked out
just to get it over with"
ION, I don't think So" said Jimmie
boy. "Such awfully kind people as
they are am sure wouldn't wish harm
to come to anybody"
"Who told you they were so good
and kind?" demanded the Amalga-
mated Copper.
"They did," said Jimmieboy.
"Well, they ought to know, but let
me tell you something, young man."
said the Amalgamated Copper. with
knowing wink; they're great jolliers,
those two fellers. Maybe the Armour
dillo was beefing you, and as for the
Iron Pig-welP-
What about the Iron Pig" demand
ed Jimmieboy
He may have been Pig-Ironically
speaking" said the Amalgamated Cop
per.
mot at ALL" cried Jimmieboy. In
iignantly. They both Of EN- proved'
But the Amalgamated Copper did
not wait to hear what had they had
proved, for as Jimmieboy spoke he let
forth q terrific yell of fear, and fed
madly up Aqua avenue In the direc-
ton of Easy Street. crying again and
agin, 1.-The Tom Tom! The Tom-Tom!
Fly for your lives! The Tom-Tom."
And Jimmieboy, looking up. per-
ceived a brass band coming along the
Avenue from the opposite direction,
at the head of which, riding upon a
milk white steed, with wings-none
other than Pegasus, apparently-was
the famous Independent Trust, the
man of the hour, the cOrnerer OF the
word market, the great and veritable
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