The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-11-21
HVMOR OF TIE DAY

HUMOR OF TIE Day
1T seems to me-" said Mrs. oldcastle.
that in these days there is no hope for
the man who lacks initiative.
Il know it" replied her hostess. That
must be one reason why Josiah has such
wonderful success. He gets initiated into
something new nearly every week -
Chicago Record-Herald.
Stranger see Carnegie has offered
your town a library.
Uncle 'Rastus-Lemme tell 20 sumpiu'
sah-de cryin' need oh dis town am q cir
culatin' heneoop.-Judge.
Il understand Miss Gadday has Tilted
Jack Sterling and is 70 marry a rich
brewer from Cincinnati"
You don't say2 What's the lucky
''why " Jack Sterling. ''-Philadeiphia
Press.
First Phflosopher-I sometimes wonder
whether our efforts amount to anything
second Phiiosopher-wen. have you ev-
wouldn't be philOsophers--Life.
Uncle Archibald-It must tire you. Ber-
tina, to talk to your old deaf uncle
Bertha-Oh, Just trifle, dear Uncle
Uncle Arehie-weli-don.t say half SO
much. but say it louder.-Brookiyn Life.
Mr.. Quicktaint trustee of Coldcash uni
versity)-I wish our professors would
stop making speeches.
Fellow AIagnate-Why. they haven't
said anything Objectionable have they?
Mr., QuiclStaint-Eo, but I have to keep
reading their speeches to see If they do
or not-Puck.
did you have a good time during the
social season last winter2''
Well answered Mr.. Cumrox. Il ate
q lot OF things I don't like. met a lot OF
people | don know and bought a lot ot
Things / don't need. So guess I must
have had good time. Washington
Charlie Gebust appears to be a good
deal upset by that bank failure
Yes, I understand him to say that he
lost ms balance cleveland Leader
- Why WHY don't you advocate REFORM ask
Il do advocate it." answered Senator
Sorghum. But don't see any occasion
for my risSing my political and pecuniary
future on It. Washington Star.
Yes she's Just wild on the subject OF
home up more than half the time"
Yes"
And wears openwork hosiery all the
year round. Cleveland Plain Dealer
Mrs Brown is so philanthropic. She
loves to give things away"
But she goes too far. She gives people
away-'-Detroit Free Press.
TN give. you position as clerk to
factory?''
graduate, but-er-do you think the firm
can afford Philadelphia Ledger.
THE stage is great elevator" de-
clared the literary enthusiast
That's right said the theatrical
manager, some actors shoot up in a min
"a r1rsa To- ~
tnett Free Press.
you know Mcslanigan, don't vouq,.
said the doctor The first $50 he earned
by days work he put into a horse and
sold nearly 5000 graphophones.'
That only shows commented the pro
fessor, that little earning is a danger
Gus thing. Chicago Tribune.
She had just refused him. Her wo-
mans heart was filed with ritv
DO not be so cast down" she said TT
grieves me greatly to give you so much
pain"
He looked up and laughed.
Don't worry" he said. MY proposal
was just a freak election bet"
Then he took his hat and left-Cleve-
land Plain Dealer.
Here. Willie!7 cried the boys father,
syOu mustn't behave that Wav F,verv-
body will be calling you little glutton.
Do you know what that is?''
Il suppose replied willie, ITS bis,
glutton's little boy. "-Philadelphia Press.
Mrs. Jayhawk-Just ike mani The
idea of losing your temper and swear
inE at your razor because it's dulll
Mr.. Jayhawk-We1 I've got a right to-
Didn't the razor lose its temper first2--
Cleveland Leader.
did you ever make personal sacrf-
fice?' asked the visiting parson.
Yes, indeed replied Mrs. De style.
IT once declined to be interviewed BY a
society reporter Chicago News
zone touch of nature makes the whole
world kim
immortal are the words and giver;
One touch of winter, like the touch we're
in,
Doth likewise make the whole world
SILVER.
Milwaukee Sentinel.
NOV Instn,.. s.t1 ~. ga c..s-.-