The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-05-02
THE EVENING STORY.
a Conductor.s Poke.

w Z are considered heartieSS, said the
conductor, because we put people off
trains who tel US all sorts of stories as
10 why they can't pay their fare. The
truth is we are not permitted to judge
IN such matters. our orders being to
collect all fares. The only case in
which I violated my instructions was
Where considered myself to blame in
oeprlXing a passenger of his ticket.
l was in charge of the Chicago Limit
ed from New York at the time and was
going through the train punching
tickets when 1 came to a handsomely
dressed young man with suit case be-
side him plastered all over with the
names of foreign hotels. 1t was mid
summer, land he was sleeping with the
window beside him open, a derby hat
pulled down over his eyes. We con-
ouctors have to deal with so many peO-
pie who pretend they don't hear US
when we call for tickets that instead
of asking a second time we poke them.
Inc young man referred to seemed to
be sleeping so soundly that poked him
vigorously in the side. He started up
as If he had been shot, knocking his hat
out OF the window. Placing his hands
to his side, he grOaned.
I beg pardon" I said. II hope 7
didn't hurt YOU
Hurt mel" he said, almost GREATNESS
with agony. you've nearly killed me.
I've an abscess on my liver" And he
groaned again.
Pm sorry about your hat" I re-
marked, hoping to draw his mind from
his sufferings.
Hat! What hat?"
Didn't you notice that it went out
of the window"
did it? don't care ANYTHING
about hat. I can buy one as soon as
have the time. But I'm afraid you've
done me up Doctor told me to let
MIN operate on my liver, promising if
1 didn't that the first thing L run my
against might break the abscess and
kill me-"
The young man was so frightened
about himself that I began to feel UNI
easy for fear I had done him serious
INJURY stood leaning on the back of
the seat looking down on him anxious
ly till his sufferings seemed to Tnoder-
ate, then asked again for his ticket.
'Oh, my ticket! If you'd have asked
me for it you might have had it long
ago. It's this confounded poking you
conductors practice that I object to.
I'm going to report this matter to the
proper official of the road and find out
if something can't be done to stop the
nuisance"
''In repair the damage" I replied.
by getting you another hat at the
first stop"
Hat! What's a hat to me? 1t cost
iiAC d guinea III 1OUQOIl only last AGCtNt
but do you suppose I'm thinking about
that? I'm worrying for my life
Meanwhile he had taken out his
pOcketbook, opened it. pulled out
ticket, which proved to be a check of
some sort, put 1t back, took out some
thing else, paused for a paroxysm Of
plain, clapping his hand on his liver;
shut up his pocketbook, put it away
and began to search elsewhere for his
ticket. Suddenly he stopped hunting
and exclaimed:
by thunder. I am in a fx!"
Nv hats the matter now?"
Ticket and baggage checks all in the
lining of nv hat
l sighed. Here was more blame for
me, Consequent upon my poke.
Nov, see here" pursued the young
man angrily and talking loud enough
to be heard all over the car, this is
fist into me-, but knock my hat out of
the window with my string of tickets
all the way to Chicago, and I've got
nothing to show for my trunks"
More unpleasantness for me. I could
pass him to the end of my run, but
what would he do after that? However,
I braced up and said to him:
Never mind your ticket"
was about to move on when he
Il do mind my ticket or the loss of
it, and I want you to fix me to Chi
cago.'
"Chicago?'
Certainly, Chicago. You've deprived
me of my tickets there, and don't pro-
pose to let you of without making my
loss good. I'm a lawyer, I am, and III
begin suit, not against you; I'm not SO
stupd as that, but against the road.
It'll pay for the tickets, besides dam
ages and costs"
The question arose in my mind, Shall
I get the company into a lawsuit, and
doubtless lose my position, or put the
man through? I decided on the latter
course. We conductors have ways Of
doing things with our fellow conductors,
and I gave Nhe passenger a line to those
who followed me which they would I'M
derstand This seemed to satisfy him.
He stopped his loud threats and went to
sleep again. When 1 turned the train
over to my successor I babe the young
man goodby, expressing hope that he
might suffer no inconye1ience as to his
liver He replied that had made all
the reparation he asked, and he would
not blame me even If my poke proved
Several days after the incident a let
ter came for me containing a check I
looked at the signature of the letter,
and IT was signed, THE Man You Pok-
ticket from New York to Chicago. The
writer confessed that he had been on
lark abroad and returned to New York
stranded. He wanted to know If he
hadn't played it on me pretty well, con-
Guiding with the information that polk
ing passengers for tickets was an
American custom not practiced by
guards abroad. His liver was doing
as well as could be expected.
I have never since pol1ed a passenger.
F. A. MITCHELL.
Fire! Fire! Fire!
The exciting soul-shivering, gizzard-
strickling yell of fire rang out on the