The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1905-02-17

W OiilA6 IC1 age.
A fool and his money are soon part.
ed; but a wise man and his money
sometimes are never introduced.
Philander c. Knox says that he has
copied every word of Blackstone three
times in long hand. How about the
Bible?
A well in New Mexico is %spouting
live minnows, and the local milkmen
are now getting their water from the
branch.
According to a medical journal
kissing is dangerous under certain
conditions" 1t is. The kissee must
be willing.
The Chicago woman who says that
city life breeds dwarfs, brunettes and
disease" is, Of course, a ravishing
blonde herself.
The latest New York fad is calling
cards for dogs. Presumably the dogs
card is sent in with that of the mon
key that owns it.
The Cleveland young woman who
has declared the bachelor to be an
evil doubtless would suggest that he
consult Dr.. Hymen.
The Boston Globe complains OF "all |.
this squdge on Boston's Sidewalks
Death saved r. W.. Emerson from
some awful shocks.
A baby 10 months old has beer
found In New York earning so cents a
day. This may be considered the limit
OF sweatshop degradation.
The tin can trust is being held on
the charge of contempt of court. This
ought to be pleasant news to the I'm
appreciated Order of Homeless Ours.
A woman in Kansas City hid $500
in a home made hustle and lost the
hustle. Curious and interesting things
like this happen in Kansas City every
day.
A Chicago girl has inherited $3.50, 900
that she never expected to receive.
Now she knows how It feels to take
money into Wall street and get it
back.
BY growing Justify a New Jersey
chanticleer gave warning to a farmer
that his henhouse was being robbed.
To the woods with the ~watchdog's hon. :
est bark!
A Massachusetts court hap decided
that when a man takes four drinks a
day he is addicted" He may be adj I
dicted but 1t is hardly probable that :
he is satisfied.
A New York man wants to have his I
name changed from Smith to Cuyler.
I. he we're a rich girl the probabilities .
are that he'd be crazy to marry some
titled foreigner. {
The Japanese are still a simple. 1
primitive people. They have not as
yet acquired the habit of throwing mud
tempt to return home. +,
4N4&
. Congratulations to Bristol county.
Mass. which has SO little use for her
new Jail that 1t has never yet been
used. SO that there is talk Of selling
it for an old folks home.
A New Jersey minister advises
young women not to marry any man
until they know his past. 1t is certain.
" safer for a girl to judge a man by
his past than his present. !.
why shouldn't that experiment OF
using monkeys to pick prunes in Cali. .
fornia succeed? Every gardener who
has boy neighbors knows that the
little monkeys will pick Strawberries.
Mrs. Hetty Green. it is said. IL /.
much given to lunching on d~oughnuts :
The doughnut OF commerce is cheap. :
filling, and In shape bears an attrac- :
tive resemblance 20 N additional .
cipher. J
Kipling has had to 60 to South AZ I
RIGA on account 81 his lungs. The I
friends Of Alfred Austin are glad to
report that as far Is lungs are con- I
cerned he's as good as any poet In the
business. Z
Queen Wilhelmina's husband ~ q
pears to have settled down for good. I
He ii content to sign he pay roll on /
pay days and leave affairs Of state ia (
those who are getting salaries for TAX. {
Ing care Of them.
Countess Helen Won Schweinitz has !
won . diploma from Berlin university :
as "a lady dentist" Oh. JOY! 1mag. )
inc the delight Of having a countess )
playing that electric buzz saw around !
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