davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13
DeD.ora6Ie DOuf's.

Don't Judge cigars and women by
their wrappers.
Don't try to kill two birds with one
stone. Use q shotgun.
Don't run into debt as long as YOU
can find a stone wall to run into.
Don't Judge a man by the things his
next door neighbors say about bim.
Don't forget that the wisest owl oc-
casionally boots at the wrong time.
Don't sit with your back to a sight
draft; it may get too warm for you.
Don't request your grocer to supply
you with butter of the first rank.
Don't punish children by striking
them On the head. There are other
places.
Don't waste your time disputing
figures. They seldom lie-except in
gas meters.
Don't think because life is short
that one set Of good resolutions will
last a lifetime.
Don't forget that the money YOU
intend to save is not drawing interest
at the present writing.
Don't worry about tritles. Re
member the hole that let's the water
in your shoe will let it out again.
Don't imagine that every saa-eyed
woman you meet has loved and lost.
It's more than likely she loved aud
got him.
| Don't censure a society woman
for entering the theater q little late.
She probably had to wash the dinner
dishes before she staTted.-Minne-
apolis Tribune.
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13
A Trip to a Star.

Let US suppose railway to have been
built between the earth and the fixed star
Centauri, said lecturer. BY consider
alton of this railways working, we can
get some idea Of the enormous distanc c
that intervened between Certauri ana u.
"Suppose that should decide to take
a trip on this new aerial line to the fixed
star. ask the ticket agent what the fare
is, and he answers:
''The fare is very low, sir. 1t is only
a cent each hundred miles"
"And what, at that rate, will the thru
ticket cost?" | asked.
"It will cost Just S2,750,0 ,00O,' he an
swered.
s'I pay for my ticket and board the
train. We set out at tremendous rate.
Chow fast?" | asked the brakeman,
"are we going?''
t'Sixty miles an hour, sir" says he,
"and it's a through train. There are no
stoppages.
Gwen soon be there, then won't wc?''
l resumed.
Veil make good time, SIR says the
brakeman.
s'And when will we arrive?"
sin just Is, ,663, ,0O0 years. FIX.
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13
Our Subtle Language

The people were about to take matters
in their own hands and insist upon lower
freight rates. when the magnate ap-
peared and said:
"To arbitrarily lower our rates at this
time would seriously cripple some great
Improvement we are contemplating. If
we are not molested now we will be able
to SO improve Our service that We will be
enabled to lower the rates much more
than this measure contemplates."
Being somewhat unsophisticated the
people agreed to wait. Long months
after the improvements were made
freight rates were hoisted another notch.
The people Immediately sent committee
to see the magnate.
"You told us that the completion OF
the improvement would enable you to
lower the rates." said the spokesman.
''To be snre l did," replied the mag
nate. "We can lower the rates when
we please. Good day"
Since then the people have been in
quiring into the subleties Of the lang
uage with view of meeting magnates on
their own ground.-The Commoner.
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13
bCSS SviIle.

There's certainly something
doing, We are having rain, and
plenty of it, too.
The home Of our clever merchant
sam Bess, was made happier on last
| Thursday. You see the stork was
in town that day and left two girls
| there. Luck to Sam and his happy
family.
Wheat is in 4 very bad condition
hcrc-much of it rotting in the
shock.
". }. Hale will start his threshing
machine this week if it dries up so
he can pull it.
Corn is extra good in this vicini-
ty, notwithstanding the fact that
ii has been damaged by the wind.
Miss Ora Burks, who has been
teaching IL summer school and Wis.,
ting relatives here, returned to her
home in ILLINOIS last week. Miss
Burks is a model young lady, and
our people will miss her.
Hon. j. NJ. Welker, who has been
ut home to spend a.few: days with
his family, returned to his work
i'll Pcmiscot county last week.
p. II. Wclker Of Glen Allen,
while visiting here last week, was
out IN the field with J. M. Sites
when his horse, a fine stallion,
JEFF" got his shoes on two of HIS
feet locked together somehow and
broke one Of his legs. He had to
be killed on the spot. We all SYM
pathisc with Mr.. Wclkcr in his mis-
fortune.
From what | hear-wIthout
straining my cars-there'll be some
changes in at least one or two official
positions the next round. 1t may
be that " number of our people are
to the enforcement of the
law, but surely, Il majority of them
do not stand that way, be they
democrats or republicans, nor can
they afford to do so. Y's.
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13
MayEetd.

News is rather scarce, but / will
try to collect and send IN what [ can
think of.
Farmers are having bad time
save their oats and hay this rainy
weather.
Most Of our people celebrated
the Fourth at Patton. They re-
port an enjoyable day until about
four O'Clock in the afternoon when
The trouble arose between David
Morscr and Moses Wilfong, which
cost the latter his life,
J. II. 1IuKinsey purchased q new
mower and rake recently, but If it
don't soon 1nit raining he will have
very iittlc use for them this year.
Our Sunday school rcorganized
last ,:Sunday. Willie Green was
reelected superintendent. He is
prompt ia attendance and is the
right als,n for the place.
1'nc Eitth Sunday or Ministerial
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13
True to Her Promise.

Josiah" said Mrs. Chugwater,
what do you do at those lodge
meetings you attend twice Il month!''
''Iou don't expect me to tell you
that, do you? Our proceedings are
secret"
"a man oughtn't to have any
secrets from his wife. What is the
passWord!'
1--WE taken Il solemn obligation
never to communicate that to any
outsider"
I'm not an outsider. A man
and his wife are one. You have a
right to communicate it to me-"
Mr.. Chugwater reflected" Well" "
he said, Eif repeat the password to
you once will you promise never to
ask me to say it again.
ayes"
And you will never tell anybody
cisc!"
"Nevcr."
Whcreupon he rapidly uttered the
following astonishing word: MA
reIIiellincIIikazcnalo aloitaruvistualIza
Observation-Disclosures"
Mrs. Chugwater kept hcrpro mise.
She never repeated that password to
Il living sotl,-Ehicago Tribune
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13
A Truthful Editor.

a Michigan editor, says the Prince
ton Post, who grew tired of Welding
TO the Whitewash brush in the matte,
Of obituaries decided to reform and
tell the truth just once. He com
menced as follows upon the death OF
q we'll known citizen: "Died aged
56 years, 6 months and IS days.
Deceased was a mild hammered pi-
rate with a mouth for whisky and an
eye for Doodle. He came here IN the
night with another mans wife, and
joined the church at the first chance.
He owed us several dollars for the
paper, a large meat bill, and you
could hear him pray SIX blocks. He
died singing Jesus Paid 1t All and
we think he is right, as he never paid
anything himself. He was buried
in an asbestos casket, and his MANY
friends threw palm leaf fans IN his
grave, as he may need them. His
tombstone will be q favOrite resting
place for hOot OWlS.'
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13
Household Hints.

Rub tough meat with a cut lemon
to make it tender.
Place an apple in the bread and
cake boxes to keep the bread and
boxes moist.
Mix little cornstarch with salt be-
fore filing the salt shaker to prevent
it clogging.
Add a tablespoonful OF kerosine to
pail of clear, hot water to wash
windows.
Strong hot vinegar will remove
paint and mortar from glass.
Rub celery on the hands to remove
the odor Of onions.
Mix stove polish with little am
monia to prevent it burning off.
Add a few drops of ammonia to the
blueing water to whiten the clothes.
Add little sugar to milk to pre-
vent it sticking to the vessel while
boiling.
Add one or two tablespoonful of
sugar to strong turnips when cooking.
Towash your hands with an orange
instead of soap, will make them as
clean and make the skin white, soft
and fne.-Ex.
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13


Tue jail at Irouton was attacked
by mob during the night Of July
s, and about thirty shots were fired
into the cells occupied by the
Spaugh brothers, each of whom
We're wounded q number Of times.
but neither Of them dangerously.
They were moved to st. Louis and
placed in Jail there by order ofGov
ernor Folk, who has ordered an in
vestigation for the purpose of
furnishing those who took part in
the unlawful conduct. The Spaughs
are awaiting trial for the murder
of Sheriff Polk.
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13
Panther Creek
TEDDY.

Health IS good in our neighbor-
hood at present.
Our farmers arc trying to make
hay now, but they need more sun
shine in the business.
The glorious Fourth has come
and gone once more, bringing Joys
to some and soTEorrs 10 others, Just
rs others have done. The picnic at
Bu1foI,DIdv1llc was a nice one and
al seemed to enjoy the day. Sorry
to learn of the trouble at Patton.
Lee Strodcr and Miss Annie KIN
der visited Miss Alma Erwin last
Sunday. Miss Erwin has recently
returned home irom MillcrviIlc
where sire spent several days.
Miss Bertha Psnpst went to Mil
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13
Law Examiners APPOINTED.

Under the new law, the Missouri
Supreme court has appointed the
following members of the state
board Of law examiners: William
II. Miller, Jackson; George L. Mann,
Osceola; Henry d. Ashley, Kansas
City; William T. Ragland, Monroe
City, and Edgar NJ. Harbcr, Tren-
ton; Ragla.nd and Harder for two
years ard the others for four years.
Examinations for admission to the
bar will be held by this board at
Jefferson City on the first Monday
in January and the third Monday
of June each year; in St. Louis on
the third Monday in March and
September, and in Kansas City on
the Thursday after the first Monday
IN March and September. The sub
,jects required are those offered by
the law department OF the Unlver-
sity of Missouri. They are as fol
lows: Contracts, Criminal Law and
Procedure, Torts, Domestic Rela-
lions, Agency, Private Corporations
Public Corporations, Partnership.
Real Property, Personal Property,
Sales, Bailments, Carriers, Com,
mon Law Pleading, Code Pleading:
Equity, Evidence, Wills and Pro.
bate, Constitutional Law, Negotia-
sble Instruments, Extraordinary lie,
gal Remedies, Conflict Of Laws,
Insurance, Pleading and Practice
Under the Missouri Statutes and
legal Ethics.
In addition to the regular exam,
nations the commission will prob
ably hold an examination in
'Columbia some time the latter part
of each May FOR the benefit Of the
aaw students of'the University.
4EI.epe Is now no way to be ad-
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13

viii meet at st. Joseph July 26, p
and 2S. This meeting will have no
excursion attachment.
The De Soto Press is for sale.
We sympathise with Bro. Mitchim
and trust his excellent companion
may be speedily restored to health.
Some Of the brethren take con-
siderable risk in the kind of matter
they send out with their papers and
are liable to butt into trouble with
your Uncle Sam some of these
days. The law is very plain in re-
gard to supplements.
Illmo Headlight is II neat, new,
newsy paper in the new town of
lIhno, Scott county, by Pelzcr x
Gross, O. A. Pelzcr, editor, who
deserves to succeed if he can keep
the standard OF the Headlight up to
its present excellency.
After having suspended puhlica-
ton for several weeks, the Dunk
lin County Mail, Published at Ken
nett, has been resurected and with
a new name, the Times, and new
management under NJ. Jay Lovett:
there ought to be better times
ahead for it.
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13

charity, mercy and faith in his kind.
We arc dependent upon each other
for life and for all happiness IN this
world, and life Is 4 drcary, dark
dungeon if we loose faith in hu-
manity. There are frailtics enough
in human hearts, but the world holds
millions Of men who to-day would
die for honor and whose word is as
sure as life. Millions ofpurc women
worthy Of all love and esteem in this
world, who rear their children IN
fear and admonition of the Lord and
will one day pass thru the pearly
gates. He who sees evil in innocent
action and nnputcs wicked motives
to others IS a human hyena. rn-
worthy the name of man. The
custom Of believing every report
is SO common that the most noto-
rious blackguard in Il community
holds the power TO tarnish the name
Of the purest woman, leaving on il
a smirch never to be effuccd No
weakness is productive Of so much
harm as that Of c1cdn!ity in refer
encc 10 slandeT Hsir& possible for
more broken hearts than any other
T.s
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13

FrcdcricktoWn last week.
A. J. Beal contemplatcs erecting
a new barn in the near future.
Frank Shelley and wife Of Fred
ericktown are visiting relatives and
friends here.
The corn crop is very promising
in this part of the country.
j. II. Richmond and wife We're
the guests Of c. L. Bollinger Satur-
day night and Sunday.
The ice cream supper at Carl
Shetley's Saturday night was well
attended and a good time is
reported.
A. J. Bcal and wife visited their
daughter, Mrs. Cora MoKelvey last
Friday.
TEDDY.
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13
Glen Allen.

Owing to the rainy weather,
farmers arc experiencing much diff
\ Guilty in harvesting their oats and
hay crops.
This correspondent neglected
| writing last week, but did not neg
lcct the picnic.
Miss Caroline Berry attended the
picnic at Marquand.
}. II. Zimmerman has rented his
farm to his son, Elery, and will
move to Glen Allen soon, where he
has purchased DR.. J. X. Smiths
residence property. DR.. Smith
contcmplatcs building in the near
future.
VIM. Howell and family returned
home Sunday from visit with rel
atives at Mine La Motto.
A large number Of young people
from the vicinity of Grassy were in
our town Sunday evening.
Rev. J. A. Russell filed his APP
pointmcnts here Sunday and Sun.
day night.
Grover Hit of Advance was Wis
iting in this vicinity last week.
Claude c. Zimmerman, who has
employment on the Frisco railroad
visited home folks here last week
Mr.. and Mrs. Sam J. McMinn and
babe OF Marble Hill were the guests
Of J. A. Berry and family Sunday.
John Chronister, our clever bar
Der and restaurant man, and Thom-
as McGegor will give picnic at
Glen Allen July 20. A grand time
is anticipated.
Franklin Site of Castor visited
relatives near here Sunday night.
Mrs. Mary Aldridge and children
of Arkansas visited relatives and
friends IN Glen Allen last week, re-
turning home Sunday.
Mrs. L. n. Limbaugh and chill
dren of Flat River are visiting their
many relatives and friends in Glen
Allen and vicinity at this writing.
Miss Maudc Sample of Dongola
is visiting her sister, Mrs. j. F.
Limbaugh, near here.
Mr.. and Mrs. J. A. McGlothlin
were on the puny list last week.
The Baptist congregation here
has chosen Rev. W. Ii. Bess pastor
Ior the ensuing year. He will
preach here the third and fourth
of each month. The Bap-
tlst people here are deserving of
much credit for their persevering
pro gressivcncss Besides the regu-
lar preaching services, there will be
prayer meeting every Thursday
night and Sunday school every
Sunday during the coming year ut
their church. Why cannot the
at this place wake up2
LILLIPUy.
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13
viii Cure Smallpox.
SIMPLE RECIPE ISSUED BY MISSOURI STATE
BOARD OF HEALTH.

SIMPLE RECIPE ISSUED BY MISSOURI STATE
BOARD OF HEALTH.
DR.. J. J. McElrce, secretary Of the
Missouri State Board OF Health, gives
the following receipt for smallpox:
'I herewith append a receipt which
has been used, to my knowledge, in hun
dreds OF cases OF smallpox. Il will pre-
vent or cure, though the pittings are
filing. When Jenner discovered the
cowpox in England the world OF science
overwhelmed him with fame, but when
the most scientific school of medicine in
the world, that of Paris, published this
receipt it passed unheeded. 1t is unfail-
ing as fate, ard corquers IN every in
stance.
'It will also cure scarlet fever.
"Here is the recipe as I have used it TO
cure smallpox: Sulphate Of zinc, one
grain; digitalis, one grain; sugar, one-
half teaspoonful. Dissolve in q Wineglass
full OF soft water that has been boiled and
cooled. Take teaspoonful every hour.
Either smallpox or scarlet fever will dis
appear in twelve hours. For children tne
dose must be diminished according to
age. Ii communities VIII compel their
physicians to use this treatment there
would be no need Of pest houses. If you
value your life use this recipe."-Ex.
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13


lcrVitle Wednesday to spend 4 few
weeks.
Dan Cole is rushing his farm
work-plowing for wheat already,
w 0. Miller and his sistor-in-law
Of Millervillc were in this neigh
borhood on " cdncsday OF last
week.
Plenty OF rain and mud.
Rev. Mcdowell is going to com
mence revival meetingat Fariview
the second Sunday in July.
News is scarce at present.
The ONLY son.
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13
Puzzled.

[ called on our new neighbors, Mrs.
Nurich, this afternoon, and ever since
! came home have poen wondering.
snelIed gasoline the minute e.tere1
the house, ami 1've been wonGeri q
whether Mrs. Nurich tad Just returned
from an auto ii e on whether sirc mad
been@cleani2g her gio;.o& Xix.
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13
The Character Assassin

No one Is 10 he more profoundly
pi!i"d than Il" Who believes every
cv;l thing reported of his ncighbor.
Such a disposition may be termed a
c.sneer at the hcast and tnats all
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13

There will be an Old Fiddler's
contest during the Guantanamo at
Dexter, and if any of the old tid-
dlcrs in our county care to compete,
they should send their names to the
secretary, Mrs. Chas. f. Stokes at
ba~fnr
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13

mitted to the bar in Missouri but 10
take the examination before this
commission; circuit judges having
been deprived of all power to admit
candidates TO the bar.-university
Press Bulletin.
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13

meeting OF the st. Francois Baptist
Association will be held at this
place, July %, 80 and 30.
The stave factory has not been
running regularly the past week.
+. f. Mayfeld had business ae
Patton last Saturday.
Our merchant, G. w. Mayfeld
still seems to be enjoying a good
trade. II. M. II.
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13

TIE United States has contracted
for 1000 pounds Office per senator
for the ensuing fiscal year. The
senator's should quit travelling such
4 hot pace and settle down to doing
something for the people.-The
COmmoner
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13
Our Correspondents.
Castor.

Health is very good now.
Rev. Charles Davis preached Il
very Interesting scrnon Sunday
evening at Millcr's chapel.
Guy Bollinser made Il trip to
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13

Joe Moore has started Il rcpubIi-
en- paper ut >illcston.
The Missouri Press Associate II
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13

From what we see in the papers
electric cars will be running in Cape
GIrardeau III L short time.
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13
M arbIe Hill Press
CIRCULATION 1000.

The columns of THE PRESS are always
ree to the people of the county for sAs
discussion of questions of local interesG
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13
Shoes and Sz1ppore

hS11"S@ e~1SS" A9SH 4 cS@S
Ladies' regular Si.5O Shoe, good shoe for O. 30
that money, only %AeE@F
ss osts ssc@a ssss $noo one that wi" give CON- $l45
3op5 to pes 95s yo6 50 oa $3.50 shoe shoe sure $3.50
osn ooa nSS 6ec 7np'y onip 9noe regular $' va"o csc
Lea, c as Sos>ss Pr they're just " Of comfort and oOc
Misses Slippers, they're swell and add much to En~
your beauty, we have 'em as low as ......... WV
Chlren's Slippers, very nice for the little kn~
and cheap too some low as.................. OO~
Mems, Boys and Youths Shocs-Oxords in Tans,
Leather Wei Kid and Yellow Calf Leather LII at COST
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13

Curtains, 13aoca and Ri55one
Lace Curtains 2}1 yards long, regular 4O,-
so: curtains, only EO%
Curtains yards long, 50 inches wide, the ko~
double kind; the latest, only o2t<
Lace Curtains The regular 81 % kind, yards e. Gn
long, with white cnr-in pole ana fixtures VA"Oo
Aover Laces IN Black, White and Cream, rcgu- AH,
IL 30, So and 75c val, only 30, 80 and........ Fo~
Iaces Ribbons, Embroderes and Appleques 'am
out, they'll go at actual cost
Parasols for Ladies and Gents, good material, lE,
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13

Marble Hill, Missouri, Thursday, July 13, 1905
Marble Hill press. (Marbel [sic] Hill, Mo.) 1881-1923, 1905-07-13
Jaf-Dlc Gkili Press

PUBLISHED EVERY THURSDAY
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1905-05-08

When we consider the relation our
own lives have with the millions OF
human beings now living upon this
earth and the untold millions that
have passed to the great beyond, we
are apt to realize what an insigniti-
cant part in the great drama Of life
each individual plays. But an atom
in the great scheme of creation, we
live and love, die and are forgotten.
but at the same time it is hard for us
TO cause ourselves to believe that our
own troubles are not of sufficient i'm
portance to effect the universal plans.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1905-05-08
:. Two Frame Dwelling Houses,
STABLE AND OUT BUILDINGS.

STABLE AND OpT BUILDINGS
Tn property is beautifully located on
South River, has fine ducking and bath
ing shores, the land is well adapted TO
trucking, and is the same property upon
which Severn A. Collins lived for a
number of years.
TERMS or SALE. One-half cash on
the day of sale. or ratification thereof by
the court in the discretion OF the under
signed balance in six months from the
day of Isale, deferred payment TO bear
interest from the day OF sale and to be
secured by the bond OF the purchaser oil
purchasers with security to the satisfaction
OF the undersigned. or all cash at the
option of the purchaser.
A deposit of 50 will be required on
the day of sale.
NICHOLAS H. GREEN.
a24 Attorney Namedin Mortgage
I. ROLAND BRADY. Auctioneer
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1905-05-08

Memorial Day is only three weeks
off, and yet there seems to have been
no arrangements preparatory to its eel
ebration. Looks like We are living
in such strenuous age that we have
no time to remember cur dead heroes.
and sometimes we have scarcely
time to be polite to the living.
Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1905-05-08

"Death was fast approaching. writes
Ralph f. Fernandez. of Tampa, Fla,
describing his fearful race with death.
cas- a result :of liver trouble and heart
disease, which has robbed me of sleep
and of all interest in lite. ! had tired
many different doctors and several med
icines, but got no benefit, until began
TO use Electric Bitters. So wonderful
was their effect. that in three days ! felt
like a new man. and today am cured of
an my troubles Guaranteed at
Feldmeyer Bros. City Drug Store; Iprice
soc.