Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1905-02-18

to have runs, and de old ladies is happy
again.
1t isn't so very much for it was got wit
hard wok. But tell me why it is dat hard
woik isn't a two spot for landing de long
green in bales alongside of hot air,
De most valuablest ting dere is is hot air.
1t don't make no difference wedder you
wants to heat a house or make a reputa-
ton, or fortune, or sell a book. get to
Congress; what you most need is hot air
plenty of it and red hot
OATS no fairy talk. for we has de Doodle
| Duchess has-to prove it. Duchess. she
makes a dinky kind of candy dat all de
kids, and most Of de grand DANES dat comes
to our place, is croisy about She won't tell
nobody how TO make it, dough she often
gives EN- a crooked steer when dey says
dey wants to know What dey make from
de rule Duchess tells EN- is very on de
blink and dey comes back for more of dc
real stuff dat she makes. Well de odder
day Miss Fannie has a crowd of ladies In
for to drink tea and talk Opray, and some
of 'em says, Cant your maid make us
some of her candy?'
| wonders what was up when l takes
void to Duchess and finds she has lot of
de stuff all made up.
She knows most of m like dey was side
partners of hers, she being wit Miss Fannie
long, and she says to 'em dat if ever
dey wanted some of her candy dey could
get it at de shops. Dey was all so tickled to
deaf you'd fought dat dey had found Il
gold brick-and maybe dey had,
Let me tell you: When l gets chance
/ asks Duchess what tell. and she says
she was going to make fortune for our
kddie Emmett. What do you tink dat gon
had done?
She'd gone to swell candy shop and
done business wit de boss. He'd heard
about de dinky stuff Miss Fannies maid
give to Miss Fannie's frens, and he says 10.
Duchess dat he'd give her a rake-off on all
he sold if she'd show 'em how 10 make it.
Well, p'chee, dat gol had patent de
name-its a dink Frehch name ! couldn't
pronounce in tousand years-and 4 pat
ent on how to make it and she drives
bargain wit de candy boss, and now she's
drumming up trade.
Say, you should see her get busy, All Of
Miss Fannie's frens, and ali of little Fam
MES frens. is staked out for to bull de mar
ket. Deg makes a game of il, and if a shop
doesn't keep ito de woods wit dat shopi
She's buying real estate in de Bronx new.
and by de time Emmett grows up he'll have
a glass arm from cutting off coupons.
What has dis to do wit hot air? We'll,
WE'LL Dat candy is made OF cornstarch,
maple sugar and hot air OATS CT de hon
est level. It's de trick of blowing de mess
up like omelette souffie OATS de secret
trick. Just maple syrup. corn -four and hot
air-plain, cheap hot air-and dc ready
money is dere for her every week II sure
makes me feel like a tramp to tink how
much hot air dere is in de wold, and dat L
never made a bean out of 1t.
If it wasn't for de hot air in her game
don't tink Duchess could TONED de trick
II S de only way. Remember two tree
years ago dat form mug comes over here
and says he was talking by wireless from
Cape Cod to Ireland? If he'd said he was
talking across de Harlem he couldn't sold
a share, but when he gives it out dat he
had glad hand across seas by wireless,
de stock was all took by de widdies and
orphans-who gets all de stock and bonds
dere is. When he had sold out. de cross
sea conversationy dumb clam,
and now everybody knows dat a good
husky boy wit tin meg phone can talk
furder dan all de wireless dere is. Hot air!
Remember de top-liner dat says few
years ago dat he going to run mobiles
wit ,Iectrc batteries only one-fort as heavy
as de ones on de avenoo, and dot would run
four times as long? Dey didn't have to
wash dat stock. 1t was all took by de wild
dies and orphans, who cried for more.
Where's de battery? You couldn't find It
wit a general alarm from headquarters.
What was it? Hot air
But dat wasn't what I was going to tell
you about. Dat boy. Emmett, of mine ID
back in his school again. and he was 'lected
president of his class. Dat was doing
pretty good for a kiddie. and l writes and
asks him how he done it.
Dear dad" he writes back, "de odder
candidates promised de boys ice cream
treats. chocolate, pop. soda water and
everything. but l made speech-iust hot
air speech. dear dad. and win In wolk.''
l hope I live till / see dat Riddle elected
President of de United States. Can you
beat him? What!