The Washington times., 1905-07-30

autoW1nGll6 was a IaSC DOaL, ana ne
ssid he could push her to the limit, as
there wouldn't be any stars TO watch out
for for some time.
Say, II any one ever sings Come and
Take a Ride in My Airship to you,
don't do it, You'll be disappointed. I
thought we had had the limit of tire
some trips the time we sailed fer nine
ty-two days out of Frisco in a schooner
an got wrecked on the Island o Fulo-
benes. and discovered old man Robinson
an his nine o. trained monks, an the
Eoriller that ketched behind the bat. But
the trip on the autowindine laid over that
for tiresomeness. Part o. the reason was
that You had to stay cooped up in the
cigar-shaped body O. the machine, not
KNOWN at what minute the engine or
one o the canvas wings 'ud bust an
we'd start for glory whoopin'. II WASH t
very restful to be always expectin' q
thing like that. an yet not be where you
could see the fun when it happened. I
begun to realize what 1t means to a
bunch O. blind kittens 10 be dropped off
a bridge in a srainsack.
Rufe Gibson, our right fielder, who is
callous cuss, said he didn't figger that
we'd have any better chance Of getttn
out whole if we vas up on deck than
where we were; but he couldn't realize
any of a mans finer feelin's anyway,
an we ignored him. All he was good for
was ball playin' an stowin' away grub.
Couldn't Take a Swim.
On the schooner goin' to FuIobenes is
land you couid jump overheard occa-
sionally for a swim, keepin' an eye out
for sharks. an have a good time in other
ways. but on the autowindne there was
no chance OF that. If you jumped off
the planet that was exertin' the most in
fiuence on things just then would attract
you to 1t. and you'd go fast-sO fast thai
wen you struck they'd come out with
a dustpan an brush an some grease de-
stroyer to clean you off the scenery. l
asked Pieiades how it 'ud be If two
planets wanted a feIler with the same
attraction-would he be safe an Just
drift in the elouds-an' Pleiades said the
theory seemed all right. but he wouln't
bet on it, nor try it. neither. You see.
the attractions up in the sky were Just
like currents of water in the ocean to
our ship. We were beatin' against tie
earth's attraction for a long time. TIL
the State o. Kansas got so it looked like
pinhead, an then we got into the
moons attraction current an steered
out o that for Jupfter's attraction cur
rent. and Pleiades said that as soon as
we hit old Mars attraction current we'd
be safe an sound an no trouble but to
stop The machine.
We duTn near got wrecked on a couple
o small stars that was all black an
just laid in the air dead with no lights
Pleiades said they was shootin' stars
an had burned out an wasn't no good
no more. They correspond TO the ice
berss that I've read about in Your
oceans down In the earth It'd go hard
with US if we hit one of en- If one o.
them star points jabbed through one o.
my sails it'd be good night for a par
tic'lar fine bunch o ball players
That seemed to make Josh Hapgood
jealous. for he says:
''Shucks with your encomiuns of your
own Abilities says he. IF we hit one
O them stars it'd mean The untineIv
demise O. the cieverest ball manager that
ever sobered up boozy pitcher likewise
d poet"
Played Every Day.
oh. I don't know saws PIeiades.
who didn't seem to like Josh's superior
bearin. You don't run one-two-forty-
'leyen with the managers up In Mars.
Why? Because they have so much
more time in w'ich 10 show off. Now
In your league you plays about eight
months, don't you-about 24O DAYS in
the year?"
Josh nodded
Wen. up IN Mars we got it fixed SOS
the years is 6T days long. an we play
every day You want to figzer that
were 1900 600 miles nearer the sun than
you are, an they amt no winter.
That kind o took the wind out o. Josh.
When we finish one season we jump
right ia an start another the next day"
he says ut amt no wonder that we
got II on you in cIeverness wen we
play 50 much more than you-when we
never quit. so 10 speak. No wonder the
one-hand rule was put in efrect-no
wonder it's two strikes is out an three
balls take your base. The game has
got to be harder when the players is
so much Cieverer.'
Them two was always arguin or
ehewin' the rag or soHnethin'
I lost track o the days we'd been
away frm home, and it was gettin'
very tiresome 10 see nothin' but clouds
an air an stars, an hear the chug-
ehug of the ppeller an Josh Hapgood
keepin IN time with it. We was ali
gettin' cross grained an ready 10 fight
when one day Pleiades sings out that
were in the Mars attractive current
an now Wen see Gods oWn country
How he came TO know anything about
that party I didn't think TO ask
Fireproof Stands.
We hit Mars the next day. and mebbe
II wasn't hot. The swelterin' est day on
the Kansas prairies wasn't marker
70 IL. The day the home plate melted
down to wire grass can't be mentioned
In the same breath. When we got to
the ball grounds we found the grand
stand an bleachers o hreproof wood,
an the plate an bags was asbestos. an
the fences round the grounds was steel
plate.
mo chance o batterin them down"
says I You got to put em over"
Before I'd been in Mars a day
wanted 10 go home 'thout playin' any
ball. My nose got burned I'm the wire
in my mask wen / went out to prac-
tice. I put on my pneumatic chest
ptector an the air in 1t got so hot
that finally / was lifted Up a" dozen or
so feet, an the lTot winds o. Mars be-
gan pushin' me up, up, up. till II
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