Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1905-08-18

a seraph. Dresses like an angel, in the
most perfectly fitting tweeds, In the
country, of course. Rides. Shoots.
SIMS. Plays golf and the banjo, But
perhaps you were about to say that you
don't know poor Dicky?"
81 was"
"You shall know him, though vt was
to introduce him-and some other dear
people-to you that called"
"You see," she said, showing her daz-
zling teeth, 1--WE are all SO poor nova,
days, aren't we? There's Jerry Hank
ms and little Kitty Maclney. Her
losses at bridge"
Billy stirred restlessly on the very
uncomfortable chair to which he had
been so .unceremoniously condemned.
What thought was this, she went
on, breezily. 81 thought it such an
awful pity that poor Dicky or Jerry
wasn't Harold Farsyde."
May | request you, madam"
ITO come to business? OF course
Well, what have in my mind is a
scheme-the most perfect scheme mag
inable-for rendering people appropri~
ate, We might form a company and
call it The Impersonators, Limited.
81 think hardly follow you"
ut is quite simple, really. My idea
is to make poets look like poets. To
give an artistic tout ensemble to art
lists. Lecturers should look profound
all forehead and eyebrows and jaw
and not as if they were only interested
in some small, suburban chambers
shop. Positively, you know, these
clever people injure their own reputa-
lions by mingling with their fellow
creatures. You literary agents ought
not to allow your authors to appear in
public; they damage their own sales.
| am sure they do. And painters are
always so in need of decoration them
selves that you cannot possibly believe
in their genius And as for your reputed
wits, | have listened to more epigrams
at mothers meeting in one short half
hour than ever heard at fashionable
gathering of celebrities"
'You must have had some most I'M
fortunate experiences"
Not unusually unfortunate, I fancy
Other people quite agree with me-
was talking to -. But-as you SO
courteously do not say-your time Is
valuable, and | am by way of becoming
a nuisance. l will hurry on, then, tc
my remedy. Why, Mr. Boswell, should
all these famous people ever appear In
public at all?"
"Why?"
"Yes Would it not be better for MI
concerned if they were to employ other
people to impersonate them? There are
plenty of nice young men who would
look far more like the authors of great
works than the real authors do. And
many of them would be only too glat
to earn few guineas by wearing thu
nantes of the great at-receptions AM
balls and dinner parties and Afternoon
teas. They would am sure, stimulat,
sales enormously, instead of retardin;
them"
You forget, madam, that the person
alities of most of our famous people ar
already we'll known to the public. On
moment. How would it be possible t.
introduce an altogether unknown per
son as the author.of-shallw we say?-Mr
Farsyde's book, either 10 hostess o
the casual reader? Mr. Farsyde's por
trait has appeared in"
"And you said you were cynic!" ah
sighed.
Pardon me, said Billy, sit was 20
who said that"
Anyhow" she rejoined, you ough
to know that the memory of the commo
herd is the most short-lived thing i
the world. And then there are Away
new men and women coming along
They, at least"
Il have not quite done. g. How, 70
instance, could hint to my best autho
that he--is not altogether handsome
How could | point out to one of m
artists or poets that he was essential
not picturesque-that his wild hair re
sembled rather the stuffing out of
cheap sofa cushion than ambrosia
locks? 1t could not be done, my des
madam. The thing is not feasibl,
And my brilliant wits! What, in tn
name of all that is improbable, woul
they do to me if told them, no matte
how delicately, that their funniment
were not funny? And then, my lectul
erers. Imagine their wrath at bein
compared to small suburban shopmen!
Il didn't think" the lady falteret
"And that is not the worst of /
either" proceeded Billy ruthlessl
How am I to advise them to chang
their tailor or their dressmaker, the
q, halter or milliner, without laying m,
self open to the suspicion of taking con
> missions from tradesmcn? And the,
you know, these absurd people are prou
of their houses and their back garden
: They plume themselves on their know
;. edge of horses and dogs. And, aboV
all, how is it conceivable that | shou
- criticise their wives adversely, and
the last dread resort, their childre
without provoking them to reprisa
!, that might even be of sanguinary sor
u No, madam. Your idea has points, a
nit, and, for some reasons wish tn