Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1905-04-26
DAILY SHORT STORY
A CONDUCTORS POKE.
TOriginal

as to why they can't pay their fare.
The truth Is We are not permitted TO
Judge in such matters, our orders being
10 collect all fares. The only case in
which | violated my instructions was
where 1 considered myself to blame in
depriving "A passenger OF his ticket.
was In charge OF the Chicago Linn
ite,l from New York at the time and
was going through the train punching
tickets when | came to handsomely
dressed young man With suit case
beside him plaStered all over with the
names Of foreign hotels. 1t was mid
summer. and lie was sleeping with the
window beside him open, derby hat
pulled down over his eyes. We con-
ductorS have 10 deal with so many
people who pretend they don't hear US
when We call for tickets that instead
Of asking Il second time we poke them.
The young man referred to seemed TO
be sleeping so soundly that L poked
him vigorously in the side. he start
cd up as II he had been shot, knock
ing his hat out of the window. Plac-
Ing his hands TO his side. he groaned.
Il beg pardon" l said. Il hope
didn't hurt you"
Hurt me- he said, almost breathless
with agony. You've nearly killed me.
I've an abscess on my liver" And he
groaued again.
Pm sorry about your hat" l re-
marked hoping 10 draw his mind from
his sufferings.
Hat. What hat|
Didn't you notice that it went out
OF the window"
Did it, | don't care anything about
a hat. | can buy one rs soon as | have
the time. But I'm afraid you've done
me up. Doctor told me TO let him oper-
ate on my liver. promising If | didn't
that the first thing l run my side
against might break the ahSceSS and
kill me-
The young man was So frightened
about himself that | began TO feel I'M
easy for fear had done him serious
injury | stood leaning on the back of
the seat looking down on him anxious
" till his sufferings seemed To mOder-
ate. then asked again for his ticket
ooh. my ticket! If you'd have asked
me for il you might have had it long
ago It's this cOnfounded polling You
conductors practice that l object to
I'm going To report This matter To the
proper official OF the road and find out
If something can't bc done Ia stop the
nuisance
I'm repair the damage" | replied.
"by getting you another hat nj the first
stop"
Hat What's hat TO me? 1t cost
me guinea in London only last week,
but do you suppose I'm thinking about
that? I'm worrying for my life"
Meanwhile he had taken out bis peck
etbOok. opened il. pulled ont ticket
which proved To he a check of some
sort, put il back. took out something
else. paused for a pGrOXysm of pain.
clapping his hand on his liver: shut mp
his pocketbOOE. put 1t away and began
tn search elsewhere for his ticket. sud
denly he stopped hunting and excla i'm
ed:
by thunder. ] am ia a fix"
What's the matter now?"
Ticket and baggage checks all in the
lining or my hat"
me. consequent upon my poke
Now. see here" pursued the young
man angrlly aud talking loud enough 10
be heard all over the car. this is an
outrage. You not only ram your fist
into me, but knock my hat ont OF the
window with my string Of tickets all
the way TO Chicago. and I've got moth
ing to show for my trunks"
More unpleasautness for me. / could
pass him to the end OF my run, but
what would he do after that? However.
| braced up and said TO him:
Never mind your ticket"
was about to move on when he
! stopped me.
Il do mind my ticket or the loss OF
it. and l want you to fix me TO Chi
caGO."
Chicago"
Certainly. Chicago. You've depriv-
ed me Of my tickets there and | don't
| propose TO let you off without making
my loss good I'm a lawyer. | am. and
| I'll begin suit. not against you: I'm not
50 stupid as that. but against the road.
/ It'Il pay for the tickets, besides dam
/ ages and costs"
/ The question arose in my mind. Shall
/ | get the company into a lawsuit. and
/ doubtless lose my position. or put the
/ man through: / decided on the latter
| course. We conductors have ways of
/ doing things with orr fellow conduct
ors. and gave the passenger a line 10
| those who followed me which they
/ would understand This seemed to
/ satisfy him. He stopped his loud
| threats aud went tn sleep again When
/ turned the train over to my success
sor ! bade the young man gOodby. eK-
pressing hope that he might suffer no
/ Inconvenience as To his liver. He re
I piled that had made all the repara-
{ ton lac asked, and lac would not blame
I ne even II NV poke proved fatal.
/ Several days after the incident a let
/ ter came for me containing a check /
/ looked ~ the signature OF the letter,
/ and II was signed The Man You Pok-
/ ed The check was for the price OF a
. =. u ~