The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1905-08-24

In nothing at all but smoke.
i HUMOR OF THE Day
why do you always seek the deepest
in order to be where the sunshine 81 can
not strike answered the trout Il freckie
Pa, what is raiser?"
lend yo lse his my money aeg Without good sscSri-
ty."-Puck.
STILL" reflected Uncle Eph'm, steady
ing himself by a strap and looking dag
gers at the passenger WHO COULDN'T nnd
room for his valises on the floor OF the
ez a whole seat hawg.''-Chicago Tribune.
Have you corns?" asked the corn pias-
YES, I'm supplied" said the busy man,
without looking up.-Boston Transcript.
New Arrival-what a lot of loving cou-
Old Guest-Yes. the husbands don't get
down except over sunday.-Town Topics.
What are you going to do now. scrih-
why. am just about to start mag
.Under what name?"
The Age of Woman Do you think
wen. it is doubtful Chicago Daily
News.
only last year you wanted so for this
mule and now you've raised to 500
That's naturaI-it's a dedicated mule
now. Ever since John come from college
he's been swearin at that mule in six
languages. Atlanta Constitution
Johnny Ito his sisters young mani
What base BAH club did you play with
Sisters Young mani never played a
game of base ball in my life. why do you
Johnny[Cause 1 heard ma tell sister
that you were a splendid catch.-New
| Yorker.
| He-You married me for my money.
she-Well what If did7 I didn't get IT.
| Isn't that punishment enough7-Detroit
| Free Press.
WAS their marriage a secret AFFAIR.""
81 should say so! The groom didn't even
know of it till she'd lined him up for the
ceremony. Detroit Free Press.
Cannibal Chief--what did you get from
| that shipwreck that was washed ashore
His Chef-A shoemaker and case Of
| Cannibai-Then wen have sherry cob
| bier for MISUNDERSTANDING.
Howdy. old chnmi They've sent s me down
| to help purify you.-Puck.
You may refuse me now said the per
sistent young sutton, but can wait. All
\ things come to him who waits"
the fs 4st tn the viii des be fst f hear
him en- the stairs. Philadelphia Ledger.
Teddie-We1l L suppose shall see all Of
you girls bathing this afternoon!
Kittie-Well, hardlyi Still, you may see
little more of us.-Ally sloper's Half
Holiday.
| tribute your success as a statesman?
| Mr.. Sellum-n a customer doesn't ses
what he wants make him want what he
| sees.-Cleveland Leader.
First Office Boy-why did yer trow up
ole Bangs impidenceI He had de crust
de- hull ofce e ter git git out NV de piaee and
never come back! Dat was de last straw!
'Jim got in trouble in New York" said
the man from Wayback.
How was that?' Injured his friend.
| ''Why, he shook a red bandene hand
kerchief at a man that was flying by in an
| automobile, and he turned out to be a
| Wall street bull Free Press.
Tommy Tucker (still smarting)-Grand-
paw, did you ever spank paw when he was
Observation-Disclosures he needed it.
| Tommy, and that was pretty often:
some comfort in that.-Chicago Tribune.
Smith-Brown told me some time ago
| that he had been aching to fight Green
JoresEweli, they actually fought one
snnith-sol And the result?
| Jones-Brown is still aching.-Chicago
News.
Il amt dirty By choice m "a the
an promised ter use no other" y
wen, why don't you use that?" de-
:sBecause, ma'arn. dat firm failed in 1884,
I-Phladelphia Ledger.
Excuse me- said the absent minded
| professor, 'but haven't we met before?
Your face is strangely familiar
| yes" answered the young lady, 'tour
hostess introduced US Just before dinner
"'Ah, yes" rejoined the professor. 'I
was positive had seen you somewhere;
never forget race."-Chicago News.
! The. former head of large private
school in Cleveland was a gentleman of
dignif1ed bearing, refined and correct al
| and early rearing he was a vernonter,
and doubtless of straight Puritan extrac-
| called him from the yard. where he was
playing with some oefer boys, to say to
him. in a tone suggestive of mingled sad
| you say a swear world"
use any swear word, only said the devil
Nobody thinks that's swearing
1 II don't care" said the mother quickly:
its making light of sacred things
Cleveland Leader.
| Instructor lat night schoo)-The lesson
| speaks of character building" How
should one go to work to build a charac-
| ter?
Shaggy Haired Young Man-Don.t stick
| too close to your lines. Try to work in a
| lot of fresh gags every night. and play to
/ the galleries.-Chicago Tribune.