River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1905-08-03

the only way out of it. alive. would be
to buy something. so dad picked UP a
little jim-crack, worth about ten cents,
and gave the Turk a five-dollar gold
piece. and while the Turk went in be-
hind the curtain to get the change told
dad now was the time to skip, and you
ought to have seen dad make sprint
out the door and around a corner, and up
another street, while I followed him,
and we got away from the danger of be-
ing stabbed, bat dad got his foot into it
again before we had gone block.
Nobody in Constantinople ever hur-
ries. or goes off walk SO when the peo-
pie saw an old man, with fez on his
head, running amuck, as they say here,
followed by a beautiful boy, they began
to crawl into their holes, thinking dad
was crazy, but when we were passing a
sausage store, where about 20 dogs were
asleep in the street, and dad kicked half
dozen dogs and yelled get out, you
hounds" that settled it, and they knew
he was wrong in the head, and they
yelled for the police, and we were pulled
for fast driving, and taken before a
Turkish justice of the peace, followed by
the whole crowd.
The justice did not wear fez. but
had on turban, SO dad did not give him
any signs, but after jabbering a while
they sent for an interpreter, who could
talk pigeon English, and then dad had
a trial, and l acted as his lawyer. / told
about how dad had tried to be kind and
genial to another mans wife, and how,
in his hurry to get away from the muir
derous husband he fell over a mess of
dogs and that he was distinguished
American, who was in Turkey to nego-
tiate loan to the sultan.
Say, that fixed them, and they all
made salams to dad, and bowed all over
themselves, and the justice of the peace
prayed to Allah, and the interpreter
said we could go, but to be careful about
touching Turkish woman or dog, par
ticularly a dog, as the Turks were very
sensitive on the dog question. So we
went out of the courtroom, and wan
dered around the town, and you can bet
that dad didn't look at any more wOm-
en- though they were everywhere with
wells that covered their faces so nothing
but their eyes could be seen.
Gee, but you never saw such eyes as
these Turkish women have They are
big and black, and they go right through
you. and clinch on the other side. Dad
says the facilities for getting into trou-
BILE are better in Constantinople than
any place we have been, as the men look
like bandits and the women look like ex-
ecutioners. Dad thanked me for help
ing him out of that scrape by claiming
he was the agent of a financial syndicate
that wanted to lend money to the sultan.
If had said dad was collecting agency,
to make the sultan pay up they would
have sentenced him to be boiled in oil.
Well. we thought we had been in trou-
Bile before. but we are in it now worse
than ever. We heard at the hotel that at
IL o'clock in the morning the sultan
would pass by in q carriage, with an es-
cort. on the way to a mosque, to pray to
Allah, and everybody could see the sui
| tan. so we got place on balcony, and
at the appointed time the procession
came in sight. 1t was imposing, but
solemn, and the people on both sides of
the street acted like they do in America
when the funeral of a great man is pass
| ing. No man spoke, and all looked as
though they expected, if they moved, to
be arrested, and have stone tied to
\ their feet, and thrown into the Bos-
phorus, the way they kill one OF the sui
| tan's wives when she airts with stran-
| ger.