Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1905-03-16
s>s}kkf1ckk+kk%k*+&kkkkk+k&
! SHORT KANSAS ITEMS !
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. ~

ly been exaggerated. A dealer there
is already advertising ice cream soda.
The Sedgwlck Paragraph tried to
wait until Easter before coming out
In its new dress, but it just couldn't.
I'VE must" declares the Humboldt
Herald passionately, have a good
mayor, even if we have to be it our.
SELF"
The Sunday in Scarlet" company
disbanded at Ottawa, owing to the ap-
parent color blindness of the kerosene
circuit patrons.
It is understood that the devout Mr..
Rockefeller pronounces the Prairie
Oil and Gas Company with special
emphasis on the Prayer.
Although the snowdrifts have not
much more than disappeared, here is
Anthony already talking about a
Fourth Of July celebration.
The Arkansas City Traveller is so
enthusiastic over the prospect of nat
ural gas that it prints daily on each
page picture of blazing gas well.
The playful lola man who "joked"
his wife by pretending that glass of
water contained carbolic acid and
drank it has been sued for divorce.
D. w. Naill probably is to be made
warden Of the state penitentiary, al
though it is feared it will take at least
spike to keep some of the prisoners
down.
G. L. Hobart of Topeka has bought
controlling interest in the Slime
Printing company of Ottawa, which
publishes the Ottawa Journal-Indep-
endent.
The Washington Post has created a
friendly feeling for itself in Kansas
by stating that that breezy state pro-
poses to have oil refined by her own
criminals.
A Harvey county man who decided
to go into the sheep business sub
scribed for the Rams Horn, suppos.
ing it was Just the agricultural paper
he wanted.
Kansas newspapermen are always
up to date. The editor Of the Kansas
Chief asks why 1t wouldn't be a good
scheme to christen the new battleship
Kansas with bottle of Kansas oil.
Musical note in the Hutchinso
News; Her name is now Mile. FL
vana, but she is the same lady with
the skyscrapper voice who used to
tour Kansas as Ellen Beach Yaw."
State Senator Cannon of Labette
county is said to be the possessor Of
the largest herd Of mule-footed hogs
in Kansas. It is claimed for this breed
of hogs that they never die of choi.
era.
AT this season Of the year." re-
marks the Atchison Globe, a man
looks at his back yard and decides
that the demand of this generation
is for furnace that will consume tin
cans.
Although II may not be much con-
ISOLATION to him to know it, Senator
Burton Is drawing thirteen dollars and
some cents day for doing nothing,
while his troubles in the courts are
pending.
A Dickinson county paper is still
running an advertisement offering
prizes for the nearest correct guess on
the st. Louis exposition attendance
on July 4, and the total vote for Pres
ident in November.
One Of the most chagrined men in
the state is Victor ADJUST of Clay
county. Years ago he lived on farm
near Chanute, and one of the most
gushful oil wells in the world is To-
Gated on what was the ADJUST home
stead.
An appropriation Of $1,000 has been
allowed for the governor and his staff
to attend the christening Of the battle
ship Kansas. The Troy Chief, which
Is known to be the mouthpiece for
Cyrus Leland, offers to contribute
quart bottle of applejack for use at
the ceremony.
Medical note in the Robinson In
dex: A mans heart beats 92,160
times a day, except on the following
days: When there are two out and
and the bases are fun, when he gets
married, when he delivers his first
toast at a banquet and when his first
coal bill is presented.
According to the Conway Springs
Star young miss in one of the
schools gave as the three most impor
tant events of life, marriage, birth
and DEATH" That's very WE'LL" said
the teacher. but you have the order
reversed. Birth comes before mar
riage.' Not in our family" was the
reply.
Houses are so scarce in Clyde that
some one evolved a brilliant scheme
to make more room by marrying off
the thirty-eight widows and twelve
old maids to the twenty.three widow
ers and ten old bachelors. But this
does not solve the problem Of how
thirty.three men are to be married to
fifty women,