Mower County transcript., 1904-08-31
FARMER BEN'S COLUMN. F..

II 1t the tariff can't ever get excessive
g and oppressive and unjust and burden
some an ID insneedof revision, I'd like
to know hoW WIT IS that the steel trust
lust sold 1o,0W tons of steel rails to the
Canadian Pacific railroad for 500 and
$2f a ton when the home railroads this
blessed mint are compelled to pay 1928
a ton. My paper says that the present
tariff makes it impossible to import
rails as cheap as 1923 a ton altho Schwab
the big steel fellow says that the steal
trust can make moneyby sellin' rails at
$3.50 a ton. Nobody dreams that the
trust amt maxim a big profit on rails
sold to the Canadian Pacific at 800
ton. Now I'd like to know which ought
to be considered= first. our own rights
and interests and railroads or foreign
railroads. Of course. the more our home
roads hav to pay for rails the more it
costs 'em to run their business and of
course they hav to charge higher rates
for haulin' and carryin'. l don't care
who the chump is that says the tariff
don't need leetle tinkerin' once in
while, it's as plain as mules left ear
that tariff that shuts out competition
| SO as to allow $3.50 rails to be sold
for 1928 in this country and for 800 in
Canada amt just and proper and 1t
ought to be jiggered quicker than
wink of the left eye.
don't take any stock in the produc-
tion of a new half breed mule a cross
betwixt the mule and zebra with all the
good qualities of the mule retained and
all the bad ones eradicated. The new
beast looks like fresh emigration
from prison with it's striped coat on,
1 tell you that no old soldier that knew
the mule for what it really was will
ever admit that there can be any i'm
provement in the mule. What faith
ful beast he was in all kinds of weather
and roadin'. He'd stand more abuse
and exposure than twenty horses. l
can't see what ever started the libel on
the mule about his bein' a perpetual
kicker. | never was kicked by mule
in my life while I've seen lots Of human
folks that are inveterate kickers no
matter what comes to 'em. Real mules,
like comrade Pat Gilling's old white
one, are the most useful animal ever
invented. They are real benefactors of
mankind, alwus. haulin' you out of
tough places, alwus trudgin' patiently
at hard toilin', alwus willin' to go on
short rations when his master has to,
veritable friend in need Id like to
know where the army of the rebellion
would be today if it hadn't been for the
old army mule that hauled their rations
and ammunition for 'em.
O @ o
1t beats all creation how foolish lots
of girls are about havin' beaux and en-
couragin' fellows. Some of 'em actually
amt got sense enough to see that the
fellows they're encouragin' amt fit to
clean their shoes. Chaps that are lazy,
dissipated and worthless seem some
times to hav the innin's while good,
honest, steady lads get the go-by. Some
girls actually think they can reform
these worthless, drunken, fifty fellows
by marryin' 'em and they alwns find
that their homes are nearer benz hell
holes than anythin' human and lovely
and peaceful. Ain'tlt queerthat sweet
clean, refined, lovable girls don't alwus
and invariably strike for sweet, clean,
pure, refined, lovable men or else haY
none at all? There's somethin' radi-
cal]y wrong in such perverted tastes as
lead to sacrifice pure young lives on the
altar Of worthless dudery and dissipated
unchastity. I just feel like thrashin'
some of these worthl ess pups that act
so silly round decent girls. They ought
to be made an example of. IF they pre-
fer liquor and tobacco and gamblin' and
other vice let 'em enjoy their fifth but
cut 'em out Of all decent sassiety:
Girls ought to look ahead the length Of
their nose and ask what kind of a home
they're lookin' for and select compan-;
ionship accordingly. What a chap is
before he's married he'll be after he
gets tied up. He won't reform any
more than a leopard will lose his spots
. - @ T.; 80
" I hope my rheumatic will allow me
to get up to; the county fair next week:
I:alwus take lots @of: comfort >lookin'
over the stock and stuff. / calkerlate
that fairs are good for the. boys and
girls as we'll as for the men and women.
I've alwqs. thrown in my mite to help
boost 'em. Fairs amt just what they
used to be when ]. was boy but Of
course they're better. we used to hay
plowin' matches and haulin' matches
and mowin' and cradlin' matches. The