davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18
WOMEN I HAVE NEVER MARRIED.

She was a phantom OF delight.
One Of those rare elusive things
Detained this side the Ewigkeit
Through temporary want OF wings;
our world was not her proper place.
Rather she seemed a priceless relic
OF Faerieland's enchanted grace,
She was so birdlike. so angelic.
1 often wondered what she ate:
She looked as though she lived on air.
or, if she fed from off a plate.
Would only touch ambrOslal fare:
No man that c alt In butchers meat
Had ever been allowed 20 victual
With stun we common mortals eat
A form so eXqui5itely brittle
She whom q guessed) n currant bun
SUfficed for hunger's faint appeals
Would She respect, when we were one.
NV prejudice for decent meals?
Anxious for some assuring sign
To clinch my hesitating passion,
I asked my angel out to dine
At London's first resort Of Fashion.
She came. She passed a final word
Upon the blsque. the Norway sole.
The poulet tsaid she thought the bird
Showed at its best en- casseroleb:
She found the parfalt quite first rate, Of
Summed up the chef as rather
handy"
Knew the LATTE for IS.
And twice encored fine old brandy.
own I felt an inward pain,
When she put of her seraph aira,
To find / had 10 entertain
An earthly angel unawares:
merely asked her there to test
Her aptness for a wifely calling.
And never dreamed that she possessed
A special knowledge so appalling!
| Frankly. she went a shade too far
It was a shCck-I feel 20 still
To learn that what I deemed "a star
Was just an ember off the grill
Well, twenty years or so have gone
And now 1 meet her (ah, the pityD
A puffy matron serving on
| The New Amphitryon Club Commit
tee.
Punch.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18
Another Georgia Uprising.

We own that we do not ordinarily
pick up our esteemed contemporary,
The Daily Bulletin of Orders Affect
ing the Postal Service" with any great
expectations. It's news matter is dull,
although always fresh and terse, and
fits editorials are prolix.
But we had a surprise yesterday
afternoon. Right in the middle of the
second column Of the first page we
found the following:
PosToFTTCE SITE CHANGED.
Georgia.
Balloon, Clinch Co, 800 yds. S. F., on q. 734.
What do you think of that? With
the clerks of the department moving
about the corridors of their palatial
building as unconcerned as though
nothing had happened at all and
they all expected to have chicken pie
for dinner We hardly know what to
say, except that we would give almost
anything TO cultivate that same stolid
Indifference to the sensations Of the
day. 1t seems so devilish.
But think of Balloon! While we
in Washington read our papers calm
", or make ready for a quiet Sun
day with our collars off and feet
emancipated, those poor people are
struggling with local metempsycho-
sis We shall hear from them, of
course, and maybe it is just as we'll
we bear ourselves serenely now. In
two or three days we shall have the
Georgians in our midst, SO to speak
and the excitement will be indescrib-
able
And we will join in their protest
We think, with them, that General
Payne should have given them warn
ing. Is the rising town OF Balloon
the coming metropolis Of southern
Georgia, TO have one of its proudest
institutions shuttled about like a run
away shoat in the springtime?
WAL we reckin' not
We object, also, 10 that number
21,734 We don't know exactly
WHAT IL uledh5s DuL We nave the Illus
uncomfortable dislike for it. At any
rate 1t has no significance. Clincl
county ali told, has not 21.734 people
in it and the Postofflce Department
might have found that out easily
enough. Mud Creek, Magnolia, Stock
ton, Rabbityille, Withers, Sausey, anC
all the other rival towns which intre
pid Balloon has put in the distance
all Of them together have only 8,73.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18

the day was delivered by the Rev John
Richards Boyle. late OF the nth Penn
sylvania Volunteer Infantry The sub
ject OF his address was Pennsylvania
at Antietam." DR.. Boyle's address was
largely historical.
The exercises in the cemetery con-
Guided with the singing of America
by the audience, led by the Carlisle In
dian Band, and the benediction by the
Rev. Joseph S. Evans who was chap
lain Of the 1z4th Pennsylvania Nolun-
teers Following the exercises there
was an infOrus-i reception rendered the
veterans by Governor Pennypacker and
other prominent persons present
The monuments dedicated today nave
been erected to the following Pennsyl-
vania military organizations Forty
nth Volunteer Infantry, FOrty-elghth
Volunteer Infantry, Fiftietn Volunteer
Infantry, Fifty FIRST Volunteer Infantry,
10th Volunteer Infantry. 18th Volunteer
Infantry, 18th Volunteer Infantry, 18th
Volunteer Infantry. both Volunteer In
fsntry, 132d Volunteer Infantry. l3fth
Volunteer Infantry. Twelfth Volunteer
Cavalry. DuTrers Battery Of Artillery
For the erection OF these monuments
the State Of Pennsylvania appropriated
the sum Of So. 5O0-S2 800 for each mOnu-
ment, and $500 for the expenses Of the
monument commission.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18
INSPECTOR OF PLUMBING
WANTS BIGGER SALARY
He Also Asks for More Clerks and Bet
ter Pay for Those in
Service.

H B. Davis. Inspector Of Plumbing
for the District, has submitted 20 The
District Commissioners his estimates OF
the money required to operate his de-
partment satisfactorily during the COM
ing fiscal year. showing that more clerks
and more pay are needed in his offices.
The request is made that Mr.. Davis
salary be increased from $1,000 TO s. 90
per year. as. during the twenty-five
years that the Office has existed. no in
crease has been given, and the present
salary is below that paid the heads Of
the other departments under the con-
troll OF the Engineer Department.
An increase of 800 is asked in the
salaries Of four assistant inspectors, and
three new clerks are asked. For re-
pairs To the plumbing in school build
lrgS, for which $4,000 was appropriated
for this year $4,000 is requested for
next year.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18
A'GINNESS
RETIRES FROM ARMY
Ranking Officer in Ordnance Depart
ment Reaches Age Limit After
Meritorious Service.

Col. John r. McGinness, the ranking
officer Of the Ordnance Department, was
retired for age yesterday, and goes on
the retired list with the rank OF briga-
der general, because OF his civil war
service.
General McGinness was born In Ire
land. and entered the United States
Military Academy from Ohio In 1853.
He was graduated in 1863. and assigned
to the ordnance department of the army
until this time. He has been at prac-
ucalIy all the ordnance depOts and
arsenals in the United States, and at
the time of his retirement was stationed
in Chicago.
General McGiu-ess was brevetted cap
tain and major for gallant and meri-
tOriOus services during the siege OF
Morris Island. 5. g, and during the
operations before Charleston, ). {.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18

people. We don't see any use for
that number, 21,734, at all
Are we to have an explanation from
The Daily Bulletin Of Orders Al
fectinS the Postal Service We are
or there Will be a mussed-up editor
somewhere about these parts.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18
BRIDE WON BY WIRE;
JUSTICE CALLED BY PHONE

NEWARK. n. j.. Sept 1T.-Justice Of
the Peace Henry BOssett was called up
by telephone at midnight, and asked 20
perform a marriage ceremony. Bossett
dressed and went TO his Office at Market
and Halsey Streets. where he found
Mathew J. Brennan, Of Long Island
City. and Miss Alice McDermitt. who
said she lived in 125th Street. New York
Another couple accompanied them as
witnesses, and the ceremony was per
formed
Miss McDermitt admitted that IL was
a runaway match. and Brennan told the
Justice that he won his bride by talking
to Ter over the telephone from the
Eighteenth Street exchange, where, he
said, she was an operator.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18

New York is money-mad A pedes-
trian there recently found a 81 bill. and
fifteen claimants at once lifted their
voices in vOcifeTOus demand. The man,
however, remained sane. On suspicion
that he was hedged about by fifteen
liars. he tossed the bin TO a newsboy
who hadn't said a word.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18
FREAK CHICKEN.

LONDON. Sept IA chicken with
two pairs OF legs. two pairs OF wings.
and two bodies. but only one neck and
head is the proud possession % +. ].
Ellis of the Railway Tavern, in East
London. IL only lived a short time after
being Matched, but has been preserved.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18

A man Greading the ordeal Of the
knife for appendicitis plunged under a
train without taking an anaesthetic.
Some people have queer ideas OF proper
ton.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18

Now one OF our citizens who went TO
sleep crazy has awakened Il perfectly
sane man. We would like TO have the
combination to use on some OF our
friends.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18

Minnie Madden Fiske recently no
ticed a man cruelty beating his horse
and those who observed her cause his
arrest saw Minnie Maddern a wet hen.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18

General S:oesseI would please people
more by surrendering than holding out
10 be killed. He may not know IT, but
the world regards him as considerable
figure.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18

There arrived at New York in a single
day 6,76l immigrants. Tammany win
have to hustle to get the adult males on
the voting list before November /
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18
No Absolute Authority.

The archbIshop's provincial officers are
the Bishop of London. who IS dean Of
the province OF Canterbury; the Bishop
Of Lincoln Is his chancellor. and the
Bishop Of Rochester his chaplain. The
archbishop. as metropolitan. exercises
A kind OF general jurisdiction over the
bishops In his province. Stnl. I'm accord
ance with ancient canon law. each do
cesar bishop is absolutely free in all
matters relating to the government Of
his diocese. The Archbishop OF Canter-
bury IS no pope. he can only counsel
and advise.
However. when a vacancy occurs ia
the episcopacy Of a diocese I'm his prov
ince he then becomes the spiritual head
until the new diocesan takes office.
When ne is installed the Jurisdiction Of
the archbishop ceases.
In the legislative body Of the Church
Of England the Archbishop of Canter-
bury officiates as presiding officer. It
consists Of two houses. The uppcr house
is made up Of bishops and the Icu-ar
house Of deans Of Cathedrals arch
deacons. and proctors Tor the benefited
The Archbishop OF Canterbury t. re-
garded as the head Of the Anglican com
munion throughout the world nof nv
merely from the force OF historic and
other attendant circumstance which
have made Canterbury the Urinal 80 ~
| the Church Of England. BY the church
| i'm the British colonies and deDendencfes
| the archbishop is looked am To a., tbo
light OF a patriarch for counsel sDd
guidance. As Paul took uDon bir,eot 2
no title of Pope, though sDirft,,aI al
| rector OF widely divided territories 81
the Archbishop Of Canterbury. while ar
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18
FortY-Foot Locks.

II was first proposed. as soon as the
subject commenced to attract the at
tentiOn OF the new board of engineers.
that the locks be established on forty
foot basis. while leaving the prism Of the
canal. rs originally planned. with
depth OF thirty-five feet. This is prIn-
ciple often resorted to in building rail-
road bridges and tunnels. and il WAS
recognized in the excavation Of the Chi
caRO drainage canal Il was assumed
that the Panama Canal would have five
locks two on this side. and three on
the other. and that its greatest lift
would be 50 feet at low water and 90
feet at high water, the variation due to
fluctuations in the lake level.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18

The latest boy to turn thief owing to a
mania for race-track gambling may con-
graduate himself that he was caught
young.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18
HOURS
ON DRANBRIOGE
Change Ordered Upon the
Anac0stia Structure.
Commissioners Add Half a Day to Du-
ties of Tenders-Business Re-
quires It.

As the result Of a protest to the War
Department by the Allegheny Coal
Company that its commerce and bust
ness are impaired by the short time the
draw of the Anacostia Bridge is kept
open daily, and the War Department.
supporting the protest as reasonable,
the District Commissioners have made
arrangements TO have the draw kept
open from a. n. until Z .. m, instead
Of from 9 a. n. until D. m
Several days ago Engineer Commits
SiOner Biddle received a communication
from Acting Chief Of Engineers. u. s.
A., II. F. Hodges, explaining that the
Secretary Of War prescribes regula-
tons 20 govern the opening or draw
bridges" callirg attention TO the coal
cOmpanys protest, and recommending
that the draw IN question be opened "at
any time upon reasonable signal"
Extends the Time.
On motion OF the Engineer Commits
sioner. the War Department will be in
formed OF the changed hours for open
ing the draw and or the provision that
il viii be opened at any other time
upon reasonable notice being given 10
the District Commissioners. It win also
be explained that the funds on hand
will not permit the District to operate
the draw regularly throughout the
l tWenty-fOur hours.
II the War Department requires the
draw 20 be opened for a longer period
than has been provided, say the Com
missiOners, they Will be obliged ito re-
quest from Congress sufficient funds for
the purpose"
To Reconstruct Bridge.
"An appropriation. continues the
Commissioners letter, was made dur
ing the last session Of Congress for the
reconstruction Of the Anacostia Bridge
but on account OF the fact that a Change
was made in the harbOr lines since This
appropriation was asked for and on ac-
count OF the further fact that the width
OF the draw hsrs been fixed al 100 feet
which was alsr not anticipated in the
appropriation cSked Mr., IL viii be neces-
sary 10 ask Congress for additional
money to reconstruct the bridge"
At present, the entire appropria ton
( for the ordinary care of bridges" in
Guiding the salaries OF the bridge keep
ers, is $4,000. More money would be re-
CURED 70 have 4 bridge keeper opening
/ the draw con family throughout the
] twenty-fOur hours.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18
FORTy-FOOT DEPTH
FOR PANAMA CANAL
Elaboration of Plans Under
Contemplation.
Labor Less Costly Than Figured in
Original Estimates Of
Expenses.

A revision Of plans for the Panama
Canal is probable, and instead OF a
thirty-five foot waterway. as originally
contemplated. It is now practically GER
tain that something better viii be done
The details Of several plans await
further development, and this may ac-
count for some apparent delay in be
ginning the real work Of the canal con-
struction.
But the whole scheme. including the
number Of locks. the locations Of the
dams. and the lift from sea level. is
now under consideration almost as a
new problem II IS believed that sub
stontial improvements can be made over
the line which was recommended by
the lsthmian Canal Commission in it's
last study Of the relative advantages
Of the two routes.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18
Funds Permit Elaboration.

The examinations which have been
made since the fTew commission assumed
charge develop the surprising fact that
the work Of excavation can be done con-
siderably cheaper than had been suppOs-
cd. and hence IL is likely that a canal
Ct thirty-seven or thirty-eight feet can
be constructed for the sums which Con-
gross and the public supposed would be
necessary for a thirty-five foot canal.
it Is possible that these economies now
in sight Will prove so important that
the commission will Cecide squarely for
fOrty-fOOt canal. from end 10 end, 20
harmonic with the new channel in the
New York harbOr, and with the aspira-
lions in that particular OF other com
merCiai cities
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18
GRAND CEREMONIES
At CATHEDRAL SITE
Five Hundred Clergy and
Choir Boys in Procession.
TO GREET THE ARCHBISHOP
Children of Sunday Schools Being
Trained in Sacred Song for
the Occasion.

The committee in charge of the Open
Air Evcnsong at the National Cathedral
Of SIS. Peter and Paul on the afternoon
Of next Sunday, when the Archbishop
of Canterbury, DR.. Davidson, will be
notable feature Of the procession, have
been largely selected from among the
Churchman'S League, as has been the
custom in ali great cathedral festivals.
The children of the Sunday schools Of
the city have been invited and are being
trained in Bernard of Cluny's glorious
hymns of the Christian warfare, 'Jeru-
salem. the Golden" Brief Life Is Here
Our Portion" and the national hymn,
which is in music identical with the
English God Save the King and
therefore a delicate compliment to the
distinguished guest
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18

And Thomas Taggart Is such a good
fellow, too
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18

Joaquin Miller has drowned his muse
with $1.0000OO worth of oil. His retire
ment comes high, but maybe It is worth
IL
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18
The Bishops Dress.

Tn the matter of dress the archbishop
wears the ordinary vestments Of an Eng
lish bishop, except on state occasions.
when he dOns an exquisite embroidered
chasuble. sort Of mantle without
sleeves, clasped I'm front with buckles
and a great Greek cross, resembling the
letter on the back.
His ordinary dress viii seem strange to
Americans. In common with other Eng
Bsh bishops. Archbishop Davidson wears
knee breecEes, the Episcopal apron and
CATERS.
Al state functions he sometimes wears
q purple cloth coat. On the head the
ordinary clerical shovel hat be assumed
excopt when the high hat, so appro-
pirate to the dignity Of his Office. is
worn.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18

Judge Parker. as he boarded hIs
launch in New York: Back TO the
farm. There'n be no strike tonight
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18
Canterbury and York.

England and Wales are divided eccIes-
iastically into two provinces. that Of
Canterbury and York, respectively. Not
until the ninth century did the ancient
Welsh Church, with its four dioceses
representing the old Church OF Britain,
become united 10 Canterbury as a re-
suit OF the Norman conquest William
the Conqueror made ample use Of the
church and fits ministers to carry out
more effeCtually his scheme OF con
quest He planted Norman bishops in
Wales, and at the suggestion OF the willy
Langfranc. then Archbishop Of Canrer-
bury, gave pre-eminence to the see OF
Canterbury. The adroit remark OF
Langfranc that the prelates OF the
northern see. II intrusred with the func-
ton OF coronation, might bestow the
crown on a Scot or Dane, had great
weight in affecting Williams decision.
Henceforth, his grace OF Canterbury
was styled "primate or all England" to
distinguish him from his brother OF
York who has the title, won through
the venerable age or his see, Of 'pri-
mate OF England.
The province Of Canterbury consists
OF twenty-five diOCeses, including Can
terbury itself. Those in Canterbury are
Bangor, Bath and Well, Bristol, Can
terbur-y, Chichester, Ely, Exeter, GIou-
cester, Hereford. Litchheld, Lincoln,
Dandoff, London, Norwich. oxford
Peterborough, Rochester, St Adams
St Asaph ST. Davld's. Salisbury
Southwel, Truro, Winchester, and Wor-
chester.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18

We are to have a winning ball team
next year.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18

rogatlng no title OF spiritual supremacy
as the Bishop Of Rome does. exercises
great influence on the Christian church
throughout the world.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18

V" have just learned that Branch
produce gets it's name from the branch
markets scattered about the city.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18

Russia has found a new way TO dis
pose Of her navy She is sending a
feet after the Lena
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18
Notable Assemblage.

over five hundred clergy and choir
boys are expected TO be in line. and
many, are coming from Baltimore and
the South to participate. Although all
the American bishops have been invited.
it is not expected that many can attend,
but the Rt. Rev. d. s. Tuttle. the pre-
Sizing bishop of the church: Bishop
II. c. Potter. Of New York; Bishop
Doane. of Albany; the X. Rev. William
McVickar, OF Rhode Island; Bishop
Paret, of Maryland; the Tramp B.sh-
OBJ his reverence from Delaware, the
Ri Rev. Leighton Coleman. and the Rt-
Rev Chauncey Brewster, OF Connecticut
The theme Of lie day. Christian
Unity" is one in which both the AngIi-
can church I'm America and England are
Intensely Interested
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18

Dismissal Of a consul is so rare that
people will believe the cause a trife
more than adequate
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18

It's right hard on the pOundmaster
when the dogs die in order to give him
the laugh.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-09-18
First Man in England.

In order 10 understand why such hon
ors should be showered on the arch
bishop II is well to understand his ex-
act position in Englands official and
church life. 1t must be remembered in
the first instance that in England
church and state are linked together b.
law and what is known I'm America. CT
roneously misnamed. as the Protestant
Episcopal Church, is in England and
Wales, the state church. protected by
the government, and in some measure
supported by the people irrespective OF
creed, who are taxed for it's mainten-
ance.
In the British constitution there are
three estates OF the realm: First. the
spiritual peers. representing the church:
second. the temporal peers, commonly
called the nobility. and the commons
The sovereign is no estate at all. being
supreme over all, and It IS in this sense
he IS sometimes styled the head Of the
church. the constitutional head. not the
spiritual one
Therefore, the Archbishop Of Canter-
bury is the highest parsonage in England
after the royal family, taking prece-
dence at great state functions Of all
saving the Prince OF Wales. the grand
sons. brothers. and nephews OF the SOW
ereign. As first peer OF the realm the
archbishop has a seat in the house Of
lords. and takes precedence Of all the
high state officers He IS included in the
King most privy council, a council Of
state appointed and held periodically by
the King 70 consider matters for the
Public welfare
The King and Queen are always re-
garded as domestic parishioners" Of the
the Archbishop OF Canterbury. In his
hands rests the function Of crowninE
a new gpvpra{p-u