River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1904-04-21

Copyright, 1904 by Daily Story Pub. Co..
THE underworld in New York is di-
yided into two great classes. First,
those who get caught; second, those
who don't The police department,
finding it impossible to keep an eye on
everybody all the time, had come 20
the conclusion that Britches Bellman
belonged to the latter class. In their
hearts they knew that Britches was up
to many things; but when they came
to sift even one of these things to the
bottom invariably they found them
selves wofuIly weak when it came TO
evidence
Evidence" snorted Britches; Il
amt got no use for it. I don't want
none Of it around me. To - with
evidence"
Now, Britches Bellman, being clti-
zen of the underworld, had come to the
conclusion that for part of the time,
at least, such a citizen ought to reside
underneath the ground. He got this
idea one day when he was passing the
County National bank. In front OF the
County National bank was a ditch.
i
"Gee!" said Britches Bellman,
knocking himself on the side of the
head, Get down in that hole, just
where you belong"
Now, if Britches hadn't been an ex-
traordinary kind of a man, he never
could have pulled off the little scheme
that filed his head. But he was any
thing and everything, from an A 1 con
man down to the lowest kind of
strong-armer In a high hat and
frock coat he was superb; in a bust
ness suit, he was all matter of fact; In
n SLOUGH hat, he could scare the wits
out of a belated rich old party by just
looking at him.
One day a genteel looking parsonage
called at the office of the subway con-
tractors and announced that the Coun-
ty National bank (Which, by the way,
was backed by the democratic boss)
had concluded to strengthen its under
pinning just a bit. He produced let
ter apparently on the letter head of the
bank, signed apparently by it's presi
dent He was .courteOusly received, as,
of course, any representative of the
bosss bank would have to be, and he
left bearing with him the written di
rectiOn of the contractor to the section
foreman to permit the workmen of the
County bank to make any necessary
excavation in the subway. This gen
teel looking parsonage, it cannot be de-
MED looked extremely like Mr..
Britches Bellman A day later a
rough honest looking workman, wear
Ing a union button and dressed in toll
stained overalls, handed the letter to
the section foreman, together with an
other letter from the bank, stated
casually that he and Sam Parks had
known each other all their respective
lives, borrowed a chew of tobacco, and
started in to work.
The work he was about to do he had
all planned out on sheet of rough
drafting paper. 1t was to cut a square
hole four by four from the subway in
TO the foundation of the bank.
1.-THE bank" he said to the foreman,
faint so much afraid of going up as it
Is of fallin' down. Its pins IS weak or
somethin'."
In five hours the genial Mr. Bellman
had made himself the most popular
man in the ditch. He talked to every
body, sympathized with everybody.
iollied everybody.
But he was a good workman and he
understood his business. But he in
sisted upon one thing. Every nigh7,
when he left his job, he carefully COW
cred up the mouth of the hole he was
making with a pile of dirt
Some fellow" he explained to the
foreman might take a notion to fin
ish up my job some night and go clean
through the bank, outside and in" The
foreman expectorate6.
"Gee!" said the foreman, that's So
l never thought of it." He scratched
his head and grinned.
Il s'pose.' he added, that l might
take hack at it myself some night
What dye think?"
Britches Bellman, honest workman
shook his head. IF you talk that
way" he said, smiling, I'll have to set
a plain clothes man on top of you
got to take care of that there bank,
and no mistake" He caught the other
by the arm. Say" went on Britches
Bellman, Its a blamed good thing you
chaps down here are honest. If you
weren't-say, think of the whole lot OF
banks here on Broadway-you could
tap the whole lot, almost, and nobody
wouldn't know the difference, not I'M
TIL" he added mot until they found
out"
''And when they found out?" sug-
gested the foreman.
"There'd be hot time" returned
Britches. He scratched his head again.
'Now, look a-here,' he went on, that
raises a very nice, delicate, important
question in my mind. 1t seems 70 me
that I'll have to get the bank 70 put
night Waterman down here to SET i'll
front of that there hole. 1t won't do
to have any two-legged rats a-burrow-
in there when I'm away. ! naturally