The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1904-02-20

I rush" particular individuals from time to
| companion with the utmost devotion and
demanding an intimacy that is too close
| to last.
| In school girls perhaps this silly fad
| may be overlooked, but not in grown
women, and a very transient affection is
always the result of the rush methods "
| Now, friendship, If you will believe me, is
a most sacred tie, not to be assumed and
broken on a moments fancy, and l can
| very nearly judge the quality Of any indi-
! Vidual's character and charm by the life
| long friendships that he or she can boast
The lifelong friend is the finest testi-
mony you can possess to the gracious
sweetness Of your mind and your manners
and If you claim them not you lack the
best elements that belong in the bearing
| and makeup of the popular individual. TIC
cherish lifelong friends, and to win new
ones you must be kind and you must be
| considerate. You must, Furthermore, be
| ready to take pains in their behalf and
you cannot afford to be egotistical or
| selfish.
| Don't point out to me, pray, as did the
disheartened spinster who revealed her
| friendless state Of late. the cases of Miss
Blank or Mr.. Robinson, who are selfish,
| self-centered and eXacting, and who, at
| the same time, possess troops of devoted
adherents.
| There is always, I am free to admit, the
! man and the woman who are the exception
| in proof of the rule that friendship is the
| delightful consequence of reciprocal af-
lection, generosity, good understanding
and agreeability.
How to Be a Friend.
The disheartened spinster asked me,
with a quicker on her forehead and a
droop of her lips, why she had so few
friends. Because my dear girl I made
| candid answer, you do not take pains to
deserve them. You are too self -centered
and you are too sensitive, and you can
never make friends and keep them that
way. Do not bother your curly head try
ing so hard to discover how to make
friends, but devote some effort and energy
and intelligence to being a friend
Don't think so hard and SO continu-
| ously of yourself. When you meet the next
person who seems attractive and eligible
to the post Of friend give all your time
and thought to pleasing. You blunder in
thinking that men and women ought to
| amuse and tlatter and talk to you So they
will as soon as you try your level best to
| amuse and interest and talk to them. That
is the first step along the road you yearn
to follow
1.-THE next step is not to take offer.e too
easily! Womanwise, you are too suspi-
cious. You are looking for Sights and you
can always find them. Now. men, as a
! rule, keep their friends longer and hold
them closer because they are not suspi-
cious and because they do not insist upon
frequent protestations of devotion.
You fall into sulks because Mr.. Blank
did not come to call for three weeks. and
because Miss Brown only nodded and
smiled at you at a crowded tea, and you
were MORALLY offended when Miss Jones
did not answer your last letter as prompt
ly as you thought properly. 49,.
1T will not do. The way to be a
friend is to Danish suspicion and replace
it with patient trustfulness. Give every
| friend the benefit of a doubt, and if YOU
do not see or hear from Miss Jones in ten
years take for granted that there were
good reasons to prevent her from writing,
or have mercy upon her because she is
the poorest correspondent in the world
You can never and will never be a
good friend If your temper is uncertain and
If you encourage the distressingly ugly
and illbred trick Of harboring doubts of
the sincerity of others. Adopt the mas
culine and tactful way of never making
large demands and never suspecting
sights am the hearty advocate of an
other manly and inestimable trait-that of
rarely presuming upon a friend. To be a
really truly good friend always respect the
little peculiarities of others.