The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1904-10-22
In The Bushel, Or In The Jug.

Il
Farmer Boggs planted some new seed
corn last spring, imported from far
distant land, and as the result, had just
gathered 1000 bushels from twenty
acres, a wagon load of which he had
brought to the county town, to ex-
change for some necessaries of life, be-
fore the Mckinley bill should send the
prices up.
He had just entered the main bust
ness street when saloonkeeper hailed
him, and inquired the price of his corn.
"Forty cents bushel," said Boggs.
"But can get plenty of corn for thir-
ty," replied the dealer in liquid goods.
"Not such corn as this" said the far
mer. This is new kind, grown from
imported seed. Look at it. Nothing
like it in the state"
"All right" said the saloonkeeper.
81 will take it, as have the best fami.
| ly horse in the county, and he deserves
and shall have, the very best corn in
the market. So you may drive around
to my barn, and throw the corn into
the crib, and while there, please tell
Johnny hired man-to give old Faith
full Chats my horse) good feed and
have him hitched up by two o'clock. for
want to take my wife and children out
riding this afternoon"
Boggs unloaded the corn as directed
got his pay for it, made few pur-
chases, and left for home, while John
promptly at two O'Clock, brought old
Faithful out of his stall and hitched
him to the phaeton; but as the saloon
keeper, his wife and two little daugh-
tiers were getting into the vehicle, old
Faithful's eyes flashed like fire. ,he rear
ed ugon his hind feet, snorted like a
locomotive, and it was all John could
do to hold him, At last, when all were
fairly seated, John was told to let him
go and he did let him 60, and down the
street he raced, wholly manageable,
At terrific rate he went, until sudden
ly turning corner, over went The phae-
ton. smashed into splinters, and its &C.
cupants sent sprawling into the street.
While the bruised and battered fami-
ly was being picked up and cared for, a
crowd of men succeeded in capturing
old Faithful. A veterinary surgeon was
called, and as he took hold of the bit,
old Faithful's breath struck him full in
the face; he smiled, and said, "There is
nothing the matter with the horse, only
he is drunk" Drunk on that new kind
of corn!
The next day the farmer, ignorant OF
what had happened, took another load
to town. he stopped at the saloon, but
the proprietor was not in. He then
drove around to his residence, rang the
bell, and the saloon-keeper, with a
patch one eye, his arm in sling, nose
bruised, hobbled to the door, and wal
asked by Boggs if he didn't wantto buy
another load of corn.
Raising crutch. he calculated
"Come! Come! do look like l neet
anymore Of that kind of corn? Look a
: my wife there. with broken arm! Se
my darling little angels bruised beyond
recognition. See my three hundred
dollar phaeton smashed into everlast
ing smithereens, and old Faithful 8,
Inundated and ashamed that he can
look decent people in the face, and the
dare to ask me if want any more corn
Get out OF here, you villianous, old clod
hopper, or I'll set my big dog on you.
Boggs had 1000 bushels of that kin
of corn. He had depended upon it t
lift the mortgage off his farm, but nov
it seemed that all was lost.
AS a last resort, he went to lawyer
and told him his story.
The lawyer did not hesitate momen
to inform that the way ont was exceed
j. ingly clear and simple. All be had :
n do was to take out license. A peti
y ton was at once prepared, and the fal
. mer started out to get signers.
i. He went first to the saloonkeeperi
Is supposing they would sign without
n word. But he was mistaken.
= Instead of signing his petition, the
,. with one accord declared that any ma
n who would sell that kind Of corn to b
l. fed to dumb brute, was worse than
T. heather.
N Even the descons refused to sign, d.
ID clsring that they could not stand it
sr see colt humiliate and disgrace i
mother by rolling through the publ
streets, or TO hear COW bawl at tn
sight of her besotted calf; while mil