davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star., 1904-04-27
Take Off the sixshooter.
From the Uvaide eTex.) Leader.

The dude who buckles on big six
shooter whenever he ventures out evident-
ly needs balance for light upper story.
Very likely he Is too much of q coward
to make a fight where he is likely to be
hurt, but does not mind making fool
play once in a while to show Off The
judge who will let the habitual pistol toter
off with the lowest fine is not a guardian
Of public safety. Pistol carrying is worse
than stealing. Think how many lives
would have been saved had the officers of
the state of Texas pursued this lawbreaker
with the same diligence as they do the
thief!
Evening star., 1904-04-27
Mr.. Dovle Obliges.

From the Mount Sheridan (Okla.) Miner.
Gus Doyle sang comic song at the last
meeting of the literary. which. although
very ridiculous. yet was very laughable,
and called out hearty laugh from the
crowd. Mr.. Doyle often helps with the
literary program and from the fact that he
lives at Mount Scott, we appreciate his
willingness very much, indeed
Evening star., 1904-04-27

ton In the cost Of pavement repairs should
not be laid solely upon the househo.ders
who are supposedly safeguarded by the
laws. The imposition of few penalties
for dirt dropping would probably cause the
recalcftrant ones In this and any other
cases to adopt better means for the dis
posal OF excavated materials.
Evening star., 1904-04-27

1t is not to be hoped that the remarks of
Mr.. Dalzell and Mr.. Cochran will throw
much light the question of employing
American vessels for the transportation of
government supplies. which is the subject
actually under consideration.
Evening star., 1904-04-27

The dismissal of department clerks who
have been sufficiently faithful and COM
petent to retain their positions until they
are over seventy years old would throw
new light on the question Of whether re-
publics are ungratefuI
Evening star., 1904-04-27

In the excitement Speaker Cannon was
compelled to forget how the House OF Rep
resentatives had cheered him as a presi-
Dental candidate, and to speak quite
severely to It.
Evening star., 1904-04-27
The Merry Wag.

THAT pugilist has managed to make a
lot of money in spite of his ignorance of the
science of hitting"
Yes" answered the merry wag; ''he Is
what might be called penny wise and pound
foolish
Evening star., 1904-04-27
SHOOTING STARS.
The Difficulty.

MY doctor told me that II would take
more exercise I would work better"
Ibid you try it?"
Eyes. The only difficulty is that when l
get through playing golf and riding horse
back and various other things I haven't
time for work"
Evening star., 1904-04-27

Personally Mr.. Hearst is not saying much
more than Judge Parker. But he has enough
vcciferous representation to prevent him
from being characterized as William the
Evening star., 1904-04-27
Real Fame.
From the Hartford Post.

From the Hartford Post.
Somehow. a man who discovers two
comets where only one was known to exist
before can never accumulate the same
amount of popularity the fellow who
bats a three Dagger when two men are out
and the bases are all full.
Evening star., 1904-04-27

There Is nothing really sensational in the
discovery OF democrats who do not admire
President Roosevelt or of republicans who
think lightly of Judge Parker
Evening star., 1904-04-27

A calculation of the expense per trip of
Prof Langley's flying machine does not en-
courage the belief that it will soon be popu-
larly adopted.
Evening star., 1904-04-27

Mr.. Bryan is slightly embarrassed by the
fact that there is no one except himself
who knows or cares enough about free sill
yer to make a suitable candidate.
Evening star., 1904-04-27

Mr.. Parker has no doubt taken thought
full notice of some candidates who have
been handicapped by carrying more opin-
ions than they needed.
Evening star., 1904-04-27
Superannuationp

rom the Wilkesbarre Leader.
Twenty five of the members of the United
States Senate have passed the age Of sew
enty-three. We therefore cannot excuse
the Senate on the plea that boys will be
bows
Evening star., 1904-04-27

number of prominent people would be
relieved If General Miles could be persuaded
to discourse on prohibition instead of mill
tary matters.
Evening star., 1904-04-27
Old Jokes.

From the New York Mail
That 300-year-old tortoise at ST. Louis is
a mere child compared to some of the
jokes we've heard.
Evening star., 1904-04-27
Duty Of Citizens.
From the Los Angeles Express.


When the storm passes excellent op-
portunity will be presented to plow up and
destroy the weeds Of unsightly vacant resi-
dence lots at slight expense. Do you share
In the movement for prettier city?
Evening star., 1904-04-27

There is good deal of confidence that
the Washington club would have won yes
terday, If 1t had not rained.
Evening star., 1904-04-27

The St. Louis exposition will start In
with speeches, and then let the crowd pass
on to more interesting exhibits.
Evening star., 1904-04-27

The statement that whisky causes typhoid
fever looks like an effort to rob the microbe
of some of his laurels.
Evening star., 1904-04-27

David B. Hill may be found convenient
as the responsible bad man in the COM
bination with Judge Parker.
Evening star., 1904-04-27
One Occasion.

There was one OCCASION" said the en-
thusiastic fisherman. when we turned the
tables"
when was that?"
When the whale who swallowed Jonah
had to return and tell his incredulous asso-
ciates how he caught remarkably big
man, but let him get away
de man dat ain got any enemies,'' said
Uncle Eben. ''is de man cat nebber did
enough in dis life to- be wuf noticin'''
Evening star., 1904-04-27

The May Queens Equipment.
The May queen soon her state renews
Where sylvan blossoms dwell,
You'll know her by her overshoes.
And likewise her umbrell.
Evening star., 1904-04-27
A Suggestion.


Oh what's the use of argument when angry
passions rise?
It's difficult, in anger to know just what
word applies,
And yet some accusations. whether they are
true or not
Cannot be overlooked: they must be answer
ed On the spot.
And tho stress and the confusion often lead
to a surprise
In words that parliamentary usage doesn't
recognize.
So when loud tones of censure fiercely echo
meath the dome
Just tell 'em You're arother" and let's
all
home.
It's just as wen to have a good reliable old
phrase
That has served In controversy ever since
our boyhood days.
The fences need repairing and the voters
look forlorn.
And we want to help the farmers chase the
COWS out of the corn:
We want to see the children that were
christened after us,
any fuss.
The summer is approaching; it is almost
time to roam
Just tel 'em You're another" and let's
all
home.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05
SHORT STORIES.

In great many of the new towns
becoming the habit to plant trees and
flowers for beautifying purposes.
A horse owned by Winfield Jordan OF
Eastbrook, Me-, has mustache. II
parts neatly in the middle and curls
away at either side SO smartly and
symmetrically that one might think
the ends We're waxed.
A freak in the cucumber line was
found in Brandon, VT, by Arnold Man
chester 1t is four distinct cucumbers,
yet all grown from single stem and
forming solid bunch shaped not un-
like Maltese cross.
"The great battles of the future. |
believe, will not be between man and
man, but struggle for possession Of
the forces of the EARTH" was a recent
remark of Sir John Murray
Nickel in the slot machines are in
use in Dawson City, Alaska, for selling
water in the winter. One can put in a
nickel and get five gallons of water,
but no more. Ii is so cold there that
the water supply in the houses is shut
of so that the pipes will not freeze
every night.
The nitrate of soda. the important
element in fertilizers. In sight in the
recently discovered deposits In the Mo
have desert. California. Is said to be
more than 100000 tons. Hitherto the
only nitrate beds known were those on
the rainless coast Of Chile.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05
FOREIGN FACTS.

Since 1894, according to a British
parliamentary paper, four churches III
the city of London have been pulled
down.
Owing to plague of vipers in the
Canton Vaud, Switzerland, the authori
ties are giving penny for every dead
snake brought in.
The house at Carhen, County Kerry.
Ireland, where Daniel O'Connell was
born is now a ruin used only for the
occasional shelter of cattle.
Births exceeded the number OF
deaths in England and Wales last year
by 405,739 The average increase dur
ing the preceding five years was 36a
053.
Algiers has its Pompeii-the ruined
city of Timgat, in which number Of
art treasures have recently been found.
They will be added to the Louvre col
lections in Paris
By fire in Naples costly collection
of snuffboXes has been destroyed. They
were valued at 100000. The owner re
fused offers for some of them from
Baron Rothschild
The Salvation Army has made so
many converts in Stockholm in recent
years that fourteen steamers were re-
quired to convey the members to IT,"
suburban meeting place at General
Booths last visit
A Belgian paper states that recently
on the field of Waterloo, a topaz seal
set in gold was found bearing the Bar
rington arms and motto, Doubtless II
belonged to Ensign harrington. who
was killed ut Quatre Bras, June 16.
1915, and had lain there undiscovered
for all these years.
Among the prisoners in the Jail al
Frankfort, Germany, there is barber
who has been confined in 1t for half a
century. He was accused of having
cut the throat of a man whom he was
shaving. He has always protested his
innocence and has repeatedly refused
pardon because it was offered only
on condition of his confessing his guilt.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05
For MendIne Purposes.

An excellent cement for mending
almost anything may be made by
mixing together litharge and glycer-
in to the consistency of thick cream
or fresh putty. The cement is use
full in mending stone jars or any
coarse earthenware, stopping leaks
in seams Of tinpans or wash boilers,
cracks and holes in iron kettles,
etc. 1t may also be used to fasten
on lamp tops or tighten loose nuts,
to secure loose bolts whose nuts are
lost, to tighten loose joints of wood
or iron or in many other ways
about the various kitchen utensils,
the range, the sink and in the PAN
try fittings. In all cases the article
mended should not be used till the
cement has hardened, which will re-
quire from one day to a week, ac-
cording to the quantity of cement
used. The cement will resist the
action Of water, hot or cold, acids
and almost any degree Of heat.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05
MODES OF ia

Canada mink confined niif, i
chiffon makes a pretty tnrlrn
Many of the daintiesI lace ana Other
transparent waists are now being built
on foundations Of silk muslin.
Lace and maline hats will be worn in
the evening during the fall and proba-
bly, through the winter. The lace hats
are very often combined with velvet to
give them substance.
Every one Is wearing long drapery
wells. and to almost every one the fash
ion Is exceedingly becoming. Some of
these wells are as long as three yards.
Black, brown, navy blue and dark
green are favorite colors.
The shops are offering fascinating
little undersleeves of transparent ma
terials to be worn with short sleeved
boleros. These are often used on even.
Ing dresses where the gown sleeve Is a
mere scrap Of the material,
For wear with tailor suits, waists OF
silk, chiffon or silk muslin the color OF
the cloth will be admired for the har
monious effect they help to sustain
Bits of the cloth are frequently intro
duced into the thin material ii the
form of diamonds or scroll designs, :
New York Post.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05

'See this valve" said the officer.
'You will always have to open that be-
fore turning the faucets for the show.
er. Should you fail to open it you will
get no water
"Aye. aye, sir" said the sailor stand.
ing at attention, with a solemn look.
The officer, fearing that his explana-
ton might not be understood, stepped
under the shower and turned on both
faucets.
Some one had opened the lower
valve, and when the young officer
opened the faucets the water came
down through the shower in a deluge.
soaking his uniform
Still standing at attention and with
the most respectful look of interest in
the proceedings of his superior officer,
the sailor watched the practical demon
stration of the working Of the faucets,
never allowing smile to cross his face.
II think / understand the workings
Of 1t now, sir" he said. Chicago Rec,
ord Herald.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05

Considerable difference win be found
in the wearing qualities of two pairs
of shoes of the same quality and make
worn by different persons. Shoes worn
continuously in the house and outdoors
will never give as much wear as If
worn one day and left to rest day. 1t
saves money to wear cheap house shoes
within doors and let the shoes worn
outdoors rest and get into shape. Keep
an old pair of shoes to wear under
rubbers. The Precipitation of the feet
which india rubber excites ruins good
leather. Select strong calfskin and
keep 1t well oiled in winter for outdoor
wear. Low shoes are better for house
wear, because they permit Of ventila-
ton. The hand is free from many
OF the Ills OF the foot partly because
OF its continuous exposure to the air.
Boston Budget.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05
THE STATELY STORk.
His Immense Power ON the Wing
and His Lack of Voice.

His Immense Power ON the Wing
and His Lack of Voice.
In Holland the nests of storks are
generally on the summit of a tall post,
put up on purpose for them. ON which
is fixed an old cart wheel Says an
English writer: "A Dutch gentleman
of my acquaintance has one such post
In his grounds within sight Of his IL
brary window, but he improves on the
cart wheel by having an iron frame
work for the reception of the nest. The
first year it was put up, toward the
end Of June, solitary young stork
used to come daily and inspect this
framework. | saw him there myself
one day, standing in the empty recep-
tacle exactly like would be Benedict
inspecting an empty house, contem-
plating the view and wondering If the
drains are all right. The verdict was
apparently 70 vorable, for next season
saw the nest occupied by the newly
welded pair. Their power of wing Is
very fine, and on hot days / have
watched them ascending spiral circles,
hardly moving their broad, black
wings, till they have looked no bigger
than flies. After the young are hatch
ed they appear to be suspicious of one
another and unwilling to leave the
nest unguarded"
Storks have no voice. The only noise
they make is "klappering" (snapping
their great red mandibles rapidly and
loudly. Thus they greet one another,
generally by throwing back the head
until the upper mandible rests on the
back, but occasionally "klappering" is
performed with the head and bill In
the former position.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05
About Eishen.

Fish are nearly the same weight as
the water in which they live, so that
they can move in 1t with great ease.
The majority of them also have an air
bladder inside of the body, which en-
ables them to go uplor down in the
water at win. When a fish desires to
go down deep it can press the air out
of this bladder by means of certain
muscles and thus increase the weight
of its body, and when it wishes to rise
again it takes off the pressure, the
bladder fills with air again and its
body becomes light enough to rise
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05
LOCAL RELIGIOUS NOTICES.

a. Pastors will please send in their
religious notices not later than Thurs
day of each week.
BAPTIST CHURCH.
Sunday morning and evening service.
Sunday School at p, m.
Christian Endeavor at 6.45.
All seats free. Strangers made welcome
SOUTH STREET PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH.
Pastor Rev. Albert Erdman.
Saturday, $3.50 p. M, Preparatory lecture.
Sunday services at 1880 a M and 7.80 p. ma
Communion Of the Lords Supper
The pastor will preach
Sabbath School at p. m.
Y. P. s. G. E. at $780,
Wednesday p. m. Woman's Missionary
Society.
Thursday, 7.45 p. m, mid-week prayer
meeting.
FIRST PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH.
Pastor Rev. William Russell Bennett.
Sunday preaching services, 1870 a. m, ans
100 D. M
The aston will preach.
Sunday school at 800 p. m.
Y p s. @. at $40 p. m.
Thursday, 7.45 p. M. mid-week service Of
prayer.
METHODIST EPISCOPAL CHURCH.
Rev. }. l.. Hurlbut, D. D., pastor
Sunday preaching services at 1880 a. m. and
Next Sunday will be Missionary Sunday .
in the church and Sunday school. DR.. Henry
Carroll, one of the Missionary Secretaries,
will preach morning and evening.
CHURCH OF THE REDEEMER.
Morning prayer, sermon and holy commna-
ion at 1880 a. m.
Morning prayer, and sermon at 1880 a. M
Sunday school at 2 45 p. m.
Evening prayer and sermon at 80.
Morning Prayer and Litany Wednesday
10 a. m.
MARKET STREET MISSION.
Meetings nightly at Z 45. Sundays, 745 .. In.
Mems Reading Room open from z. 80 a. m. to
$50 p. m. Young Womens Reading Room from
80 to $50 nightly.
CHURCH OF THE ASSUMPTION.
Masses ON Sunday at g 80 and 40 a, m. ARD
high mass at l0.30 am. Sunday school at PM.
Benediction at 3 D. m.
ST. vIRGILIUs' CHURCH.
Corner Speedwell and Hanover avenues
Morris Plains.
Sunday, February Z, Mass at 10 90 a. m.
I" Ia. :" 800
{" 2S, g 800
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05

Eyes, it is pretty bonnet said the
prospective purchaser, but the price
shows that it is not a real artistic cre-
alton. 1t is only $11.66.h
Pardon me, madam" suavely said
the milliner. THE price card has care
lessly been inverted It should be
thus $9911.r
Send it home today ordered the
customer Millinery Trade Review.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05
A HEART-RENDINd SPECTACLE,

Especially to fond mother, is the ag-
ony OF irritation in her infant producer
by many causes and for relief of which
she has tried every means of without
effect. Paroia, soothing and healing
powder, gives immediate relief and
permanent cure. ForAsale by Henry
M. Smith.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05

The twenty-second case of small
pox in Trenton has been reported.
Two young men of Somerville have
been arrested for cutting Christmas
trees on property which they had for
gotten belonged to other parties.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05

A quiet, refined woman would like a
situation as useful companion and
housekeeper. Is willing to travel.
Good references. Address, Miss Kath-
crime Dorsey, Post Office Building,
Summit, N. j.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05

WANTED Position as foreman or
manager of farm. Understands all
kinds of farm work. Can give good
references. Address, Arthur r. Struble,
Sussex, N. J. Alb
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05
Gent 4 WORD COLUMN

No advertisements taken for this
column for less than Is cents.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05

FRESH COW FOR SALE. Jersey,
with young calf. Rich milk. Apply
to James Mcneil, on Mr.. Roberts
farm, Morris Plains, New Jersey.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05

FOR SALE CHEAP. A three
seated Quimby & Co. Sleigh Apply
to w. E. Phillips, corner Orange and
Ogden streets, Newark. N. j.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05
APEAPOT

CONTINUED FROM PAGE ONE.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05

LOST-A brown and white Scotch
Collie, with white breast, white
paws, and white tip on tail. Answers
to the name of ''Flora." Reward. If
found return to j. Salmon, Kings
road, Madison, N. j. 4139
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-02-05

WANTED-Live agents to sell DR..
Whites Electric Combs patented
Jan. l, 80. Cure dandrutf, hair falling
out, sick and nervous headaches, yet
cost no more than an ordinary comb.
Sells on sight. Agents are wild with
success. Send SOC for sample (half
price,. Write quick. The Dr. White
Electric Comb Co., Decatur, Ill. 4037
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1904-08-20
Wamsn on Boards of EdncatiOna.

Inspector Charles Hughes. Of
Toronto, one of the best known
educators in America, in an ad.
dress upon "School Monaces" ut
Chautauqua, n Y, made a strong
plea for women on school boards.
two or three women Of leisure and
culture who would be able to rep
resent the women of the city in the
educational work. Womanhood
be said" has right TO direct rep
resentation at every step in the
training of children. They have
an instructive idea of what is
proper in education. II should be
possible to find two or three such
women in every city. School
boards sand schools are infinitely
better with women on the board
1t is harder to corrupt women than
men Instead Of politics degra
ding women, women uplift poll
tics"
The late Governor Pattison. of
Pennsylvania, whose political life
challenged the respect of supper.
tiers and opponents of all parties,
not long ago made this state M ent
along the same line:
II believe in the States wber.
woman suffrage has already been
tried it has been accompanied with
success. III the city of Philadel
phia the election of women to the
School Board, and their appoin,
ment to the Board of Central, bav.
been Of great advantage. I am
satisfied that in the educationaN
administration Of the State thei.
admission to the fullest power and
authority will be accompanied with
the greatest advantage to the Com
monwcaIth.
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1904-08-20

The State convention of the
Socialist party held at Gran Saline
nominated full State ticket as
follows:
For Ward H Mills
of Dallas.
For Lieutenant Gcvernor-Lee
L Rhodes of Van Zandt county.
For Attorney General-M. A.
Smith of Commerce.
For Controler-Nat B. Hunt of
Tyler.
For Treasurer-I. D. Schur.
mann of Fort Worth.
For Railroad Commissioner--R
o. Langworthy of San Antonio.
For Land Com missioner. /.
Swan of Jones county.
For Judge of Supreme Court
w. D. Simpson, ,Ir., of Dallas.
For Judge of Court of Criminal
Appeals - Claud 5. Riddle of
Grand Saline.
J. c. Rhodes of Van Zandt was
nominated presidential eleclor for
that district.
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1904-08-20
A Worm Killer.

} A ] Montgomery, Puxico,' Wayre
Co., Mo, writes: 81 have little twin
girls, who have been bothered with
worms all their lives. | tried every.
thing to relieve them which failed until
! used Whites Cream Vermifuge; the
first two doses brought four worms
from one of them, tins next two doses
twelve, enc Of them measG1ug twelve
inches; the Dth2r child was only reliev-
ed OF four worms. 1t is Il most excel
lent medicine Whites Cream Yer
mifuge is good for ,chinreu. 1t not
only destroy worms. IL cps the child
70 Norteo. growth, wards oil sickness.
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1904-08-20
at all depends upon the crop >

~ w PVhuS uJoH tHe CIop
That IS the way everyone explains
the outlook for good year The
manufacturer, the wholesaler, the
retailer, tradesuen, travellers, tin
kers tailors, ali keep their wealth
er eye upon the country at this
season. A light crop would maan
a light years business 10 all
When the farmer has moosy to
spend, none else can &c, It, and
conversely. All along the line of
the various avocations in which
men are engaged, "A prosperous
time comes when the tiiler Of the
soil is rewarded by Dame Nature
for his intelligent efforts. Far.
mers Advocate,
The Jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 18??-1907, 1904-08-20

The Pittsburg Gazrt'e says the
farmers of Camp county will plant
at least five thousand acres in
Irish potatoes next year There is
big money in potatoes and other
counties should fDNow with large
acreage.