Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1904-05-27
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CHIPS AND RAGS
BY LUE F. VERNON.
- ss33sssss33ss33ssssss477

commandments
When a man is broke he thinks all
OF his so.called friends know about it.
You can doubtless find in the rag
basket any rag bu: the one you want.
We just pull away from the coal
man when the ice man grabs us. Ter
rble,
Most men handle beer checks in a
more graceful manner than bank
checks.
Fame hunts for the man, but the
man, as a rule, is in saloon playing
"Solo."
A newspaper without ads" is like
sandwich without Olympia beer
no good.
No matter what the state of the
weather, glass of beer generally has
a white collar on.
Society consists mostly of patent
feathers, white vest, gall, nerve and
belt-honest- debts.
The Japs are proving to the world
that they are as brave fighters as the
Russians are sprinters.
What's the use of being buzzard
when you have the chance to become
either an Eagle or a Lion?
The average woman does not lead
people to believe that she is younger
than she really is. She merely tries to.
And now the girls make goo-goo eyes
At the young dude clerk-so mellow;
So they can get the chocolate drops,
To give to their best fellow.
Times have been so quiet, this
spring, that even the spring poet could
not find place to work off his annual
ode.
Some men, we believe, after hearing
them attempt to sing, can warble just
as we'll from the bible as from hymn
book.
Many men would find gold quicker
if they prospected as diligently for a
job of work as they do for LOST
mine.
The reason some clerks don't seem
able to do any work around the store
is because they always have had q
political job, before.
The bark of the Seattle Times at the
P-I. attracts about as much attention
as the ant did, when it said to the
elephant Who're you shoving?"
There is one thing good about build.
ing air castles. They drive worry and
care away for the time being, and
what is best of all. do not cost cent.
A big silver dollar seems grander,
and a more charming sight to the eye
of the stoney broke man. than the
scenery of Yellowstone Park is to the
eye of the rich man.
Congressman Cushman, of Wash.
ington State, has reached that pinacle
of fame when his stories and witty
sayings are being noticed in the big
papers. That is fame. indeed.
Natal has newspaper, Ipepale Hinagd,
printed in the Zulu language.
Why, there is nothing odd about
that. Seattle has a newspaper, the
Times, printed in the Blethen Ian.
guage.
How is it that writers who have no
use for this fellow Vernon" manage
to read what he" scribbles? And in
many instances re-write paragraphs
appearing in "Chips and Rags" to fit
their locality.
We have noticed that during our
career that nothing delights a girl so
much as the devoted attention OF the
man of her choice, unless its the de-
voted attention of the man OF some
other girls choice.
IfRichard X. Fox. of the Police Ga
sette, was alive to-day he would have
TO offer an automobile, or an air-ship,
as a trophy for the fighters to work
for. The day OF the diamond cham
ship belts" is past.
We have seen o high-toned married
society couple, dining and wining a
party of friends, when only that after.
noon they had refused to pay an old
woman for butter and eggs furnished
the swell society pair.
| If the Seattle Times cuts Off all its
exchanges that criticise what the
would.be Henry Watterson Blethen oi
the State OF Washington publishes as
l." editorials, ,"it will have few exchanges
but plenty OF Allen clippings.
i Challenge - The Russian govern
ment challenges any nation on earth
to a running match. Each nation te
put an army OF equal number OF mer
in the field and if Russia doesn't win
she will forfeit one OF her sunker
warships.
We would call the special attention
, of the "Note and Comment" man o
the Portland Oregonian to keep hi
eve on the Sunday Welcome editoria
, column. The Welcome editor and tn
Note and Comment" writer seem t.
have:
. Two souls with but single thought
Two editorial squibs as one.