The Savannah morning news. (Savannah, Ga.) 1900-current, 1904-12-18

We'll, Chas. Wagner has been havln'
tn fine old time over here" said Mr..
Dooley.
rs that tn man that wrote tn
music?" asked Mr.. Hennessy.
No" said Mr. Dooley: that was
Cal. This is Chas. Wagner an he's tn
author iv tn 100000 book that Presi-
dent Rosenfelt has read since tn first
iv NOVEMBER. This called TIL Simple
Life He cudden't find it In France
so he come Like FIR 1t among tn
simple an pasthral people in this coun-
thry. He found it. He come over in
a large but simple ship Nv twinty
thousdn' simple horse power an landed
in tn simple little viloge " New York
where he was met be a comfy iv sim
pie little village lads am lasses an
escorted to tn simple Waldorf an in
stalled in a room simply decorated in
purple plush. That avenin' he attind-
ed meetin iv tn Fifth Av'noo Female
Simplicity Club A lady wearin a col
lar Nv dimon's whose value was simply
fabulous recited passages FIRM Tn
Simple Life.
After this a simple supper iv terrapin
an champagne was sarved. He then
took a simple Pullman train TO Wash
ington where he attended a rayciption
at which a lady iV tn diplomatic core
which is all that is left iv diplomacy
nowadays. poked tn wife iv a congress-
man with a lorgnette fr goin into sup
per ahead iv her. Later he was ray
ceived be tn simple president who
said to him: 'Chas," he says, I've been
preachin' ye'er book to me counthry-
men," he says. Simplicity an a sthrong
navy is tn WatchWord Nv this admin
stration," he says.
Since thin Chas. has been whoopin'
up tn simple life They've showed
him Everything simple we have He's
seen tn subway, tn drainage canal,
IN stock exchange. Tom Lawson,
Jawn d. Rockefeller an Mrs Chad
wick. He's looped tn loops, shot tn
shoots, had a ride in Il pathro wagon,
played tn races an met Dave Hill.
Tn las, seen Nv him he was clmbin In
to private car in fur-lned coat
an plug hat. Whin he goes home to
his simple life in Paris, he's goin' to
have a ticker put IN his study. He is
undershtud to favor sellin' copper on
bulges
Il haven't read his book, but Hogan
says It's good wan, an I'm goin to
read 1t afther I've read tn Bible an
Emerson, which Mike Ahearn ricom-
mended to me tn year Nv tn big fire
Tn idee is that no matther what We
ar-re, we must be simple. If ye're rich,
be simply rich; If ye're poor be sim
ply poor; If ye're nayether, be naye-
Their, but be simple about it. We don't
have to be gin'rous to be simple He
makes a sthrong pint Nv that. (Regards
to Russell Sage) 1t isn't nicissry to
open ye'er purse, says Chas. If ye'er
miser be simple miser. 1t amt
issintial to be poor to be simple. A
poor man walkn' tn sthreet is far
less simple thin rich man lolin back
in his carriage an hgurn' out simple
inthrest on his cuff. TIL poor man is
envious iv tn rich man, but tn rich
man Is not envlous iv tn poor man.
! If ye're a flower, says he. be a flower.
II ye're bur-rd be a bur-rd; IL a
horse, horse, If a mule a mule, IL a
hummin' bur-rd a hummin' bur-rd; If
pole cat pole cat; If a man a man.
But always be simple, be 1t aver so
complex.
"Th on'y thing Hogan an 1 can't
make out firm tn book Is what is
simplicity. | may be a simpeton, Hin
Missy, but / don't know. Father Tom
Burke was forty years writin' a book
on simplicity and he niver got be-
yond tn first sintince, which was: 1t
Is simply impossible to define sim
plicity.' 1T amt simple to be poor, it
amt simple to be without clothes IL
amt simple to be pious or sober. Ye're
pretty simple to believe all / tell We,
but we may not be as simple as / think
an hope. A lie may be as simple as
tn truth. Tn fact iv tn matther is
that tn rale truth is niver simple
What we call thruth an pass around
firm head to hand is on'y kind Nv a
currency that we use FIR convenience
There are a good NANNY counterfeit
ers, an a lot iv tn counterfeits mus
be In circulation. / haven't amy ques-
ton that / take in NANNY Nv thin over
me intellectual bar ivry day an pass
out not a few. Some Nv tn counter
feits has as much precious metal in
thin as tn rale goods, ony they don't
bear tn govermint stamp.
What tn divvle Is simplicity amy
how? Simple is "A foolish wurrud whin
we come to think # over. Simple, sim
pie, simple. It's kind iv a mix
ture Nv silly an dimple. / don't know
how TO go about beln simple. TIL
Lord didn't make me that way.
can imagine simplicity, but / can't
just put me hand on II. No more can
Chas. Wagner. Tell me. Chas., how to
lead tn simple life. Tell me. Thay-
dore Rosenfelt, simple soul. what
must do. III go as far as We like.
Hand out tn raycelpt. I'll make