New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1904-06-08
rs LOVE INSANITY?"
Romantic Kind of Short Duration
affection That Lasts.


Ject or Hugh o Pentecost's after dinner speech at
the closing meeting OF the Sunrise Club Monday
evening Mr. PentecOst began by implorng the
audience to understand that ne was about to con-
slder the subject abstractly. from personal ex
per1ence he had been induced TO talk about this
matter before. he said. and persons had carried
remarks of his TO a certain member Of his family.
and 1t was not their fault that they did make
him trouble. Furthermore, since the announce
ment of his subject he had been approached by so
many women in a threatening attitude that for the
first time in long career of public speaking he
could fairly say that he intimidated. and
should probably hedge
What is love?" he began Is il a disease? Is
II species of insanity? What we call romantic
love attacks men generally between the ages of
eighteen and twenty-five. 1t attacks girls too.
but with difference. The girl always keeps her
head enough to know what she is about The man
becomes temporarily a Iuuatic II is a in
which people do not see each other they are.
They seem entirely different persons. I've seen q
man in love with q that I thought he must
be crazy to love. 1 couldn't have loved her TO
save my life. l her she He a
totally different person
That sort of love disappears very quickly after
marriage. 1t never lasts than q few years.
IL may 30 gone II few weeks And there you
are. Married. and the feeling which induced you
to marry vanished. That is the END of that kind
OF love between those two people.
Now. the fact that the TWO people are married
has nothing 10 do with this disappearance There
is a liberal element OF very Intelligent and re-
spectacle people that betrays a disposition 10 think
that marriage Is an evil per and should be
abolished have known some of these people who
assumed the marriage relation without the conven-
tonaI ceremony. And they just apt TO be
unhappy as those who married. Romantic love,
with its spIendors of emotion persisted just the
same between them between those who were
bound
| The happiness Of the years that follow does not
depend in any way upon whether the two people
have observed the common ceremony or not. 1t
depends entirely on the two people themselves. II
the TWO people constituted that they can
maintain mutual love- it Will not come to end
II they not. it will As matter Of fact 10 one
Is happy, either married single for any pro-
lonstd period. But very great number OF married
people, the vast majority, in fact comfortable
/ II Lle relation. They get comfort with IL
tnan they would without it. The feeling they be-
gan with has come % end Then their future
comfort depends whether they harmonize or not;
! whether they on the same intellectual plane;
whether their tastes agree-u short. whether they
SUIT each other whether they like each other.
And TWO people who do suit each other in this way
come eventually after the lapse OF years, 10 feel
that this Is better and more satisfactory feeling
than even Tie roseate, Understandable. unreal feeling
with which they began.
What call this later feeling. friend
ship. affection, what not, don't know. But all
happy married people possess it, and laey AL
know 1t IS better than the other. These the
happy people. the people 9yeTy euves, The
people who have maintained that much discussed
institution the home. many centuries. that
no assaults have had any effect upon It Marriage
Is popular Livery BODY VIII so into H. II they nave
tried IL once. they viii Try It again. II they have
been married twice. they Will marry three times, If
. the occasion arises. II they were happy the first
time they Will Say, can duplicate H. II they
were unfortunate before. they say I do bet
this time speaking OF the great mass OF
human kind OF course. there exceptions 70
every Fule IN spite Of tho apparently great mum
Der OF divorces. the % the remains
fond OF marriage II suits them II meets their
needs Il IS what they want
ETERNAL ESPIONAGE KILLS IT.
Il viii tell you what IS tie real love- the
thing that VIII XIII it as surely and irremed!aoly
action OF any law nature Il is q dis
position the part OF either OF the parties
TO control the movements OF the other. And when
we consider the vast number OF marriages IN which
the husband tries TO control the wife. or the VIE
tries 70 control the husband. and now tEey
suu 80 living together. We can explain II
only By the that accustomed 10
slavery that we don't know what freedom Is. Ike
people take their freedom secretly. When a per
lie viii escape 1t secretly II this OF mo-
nopoIx this sense control! this sense OF continual
one v 10 fees and suffers from It, ,,,, NOV, ,t1
80 clock in the morning telling me the tale OF
his married unhapplness. 1t had 10 come out ana
! happened 70 be there, and got II II had oes-4
q wooden Indian II would have done just as Wei.
1t volcano that mad 10 erupl. fie SAID
You know my VIE. married her TWO years as
She was, and Is. every thing that q woman should
be. loved her passiOuately. Otherwise there was
no earthly reason why I should have married her
AT the end eight months my love died. Since
then I've been il Hades
Because She won't let me out of her sight
said he. Shes learned tyDewritInE. and comes
down to my office TO be my secretary. cant get
away from her an hour out OF the tweuty-toIT
It's driving me mad ! urged her Tor a month 70
20 and see her folks. Now she's gone for three
Weeks and l ike her better to-day than have
/ any time the last year and a half
4 said why don't you tell her all tk's?'
He said Ii would break her heart
Il said, My young friend, you are esCtlAtic-
He said: Well perhaps l But deliberate
" tell her that I'm tired of her that can't bear
lief from her | simply can't do it, It's brutal
or later thereu be explosion that Will 6reah
hearts for Human nature can't stand that
kind OF strain continuously
Now. do you suppose that is the only boy IN
thousands OF them If you TO !cye
YOU give him his freedom. Don't ask where ne
has been Don't ask what he's been doing Don't
keep any track of his movements Give him his
freedom. freely, royalty. like queen. and you Will
bays and keep a devoted lover. II there is any
rise TO that point OF self-controI ana geher-
GIVE a WOMAN FREEDOM
And the other side Of it is exactly the same.
Gave woman her freedom. il you to keep
her love OF course II you like to play the despot
bettSr than retain your wIfe's love. all right
But you can't do both Assume control over her
movements l believe most Women Ike to nave
rhe,, ha,.- doing. won't find out. II she
draSsrtt ayan+ vou 10 any more than she will md
think you want TO know Now. this is an unnat-
ural feeling womans part It seems lnStinGtlyt,
hut II isn't 1t comes because women haven't been
used much freedom as men have IRAN her me
other way. Train her TO have her own private IRE,
Ih4 31 81 st IN S and she viii like YOU better
AID DON'T al