Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-09-22
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~~N~>~s~~N~N~e
"Dld you ever get into an argument
with hlmr "Yes, indeed" Hes
quite dogmatlc, Isn't hep "oh. posi-.
lively bull-dogmatle." - Philadelphia
Ledger
Boyle-The Korners live very fru.
gally indeed. They have cast.lron rules
for the spending OF their money. HoylO
That is what | should call rigid econ.
omy,--kansas City Journal
willy-Say, auntle, what did Uncle
Bob marry you torl Aunt--why. for
love, OF course. Willy (medltatlvely)
-H'ml Love win make man do al.
most anything. won't II. auntleS
Rev, Dr. rhirdly--Don't you know,
little boy, that you shouldn't fsh on
the Sabbath dayH Tommy Toddles-I
amt a-nshin'. boss, I'm JUS teaehln'
worms how ter swim.-Chieago Chron.
icle.
rs she a new womanr Better
than new. even. You see, she secured
one hundred thousand dollalrs alimony
from her last husband. and that makes
her improved property."-New York
Times.
How many lodges did you say your
husband belonged tor she suddenly
asked. Fifteen" Mercy ON me! But
think Of a man being out tlfteen nights
week. am really glad that I'm q
widow"
Now, this fair" said the man who
had been chasing around st. Louis,
with his nose In the air. rs plenty big
enough, but" "Ah" interrupted the
wise observer. "Are you from Chi.
cago or BuffaloT
"In India BARRIERS rank high, so,
cially they are the equals Of the
priests" Say. where DO poets come
In over there!" Same place they do
here" where's thatr' Among the
illustrious dead" -- Chicago Record
Herald.
'Is the boss going to give you the
raise you asked tor?" "well--er--I'm
afraid to say. l told him l thought
my pay should be commensurate with
tho amount OF work do. and he
promptly agreed with me" ."--Phlladel.
phia Press.
You must not expect me to give up
by gtrlhoOd's ways all at once" said
the happy bride. 'oh. won't" he re-
Piled. 81 hope you'll keep right on
taking an allowance from your father
Just as II nothing had happened."--
Superior Telegram.
Employment Agent-what was the
matter with your hast placer Domes
ttc-The missus was too particular
Employment Agent-in what wayr Do
mSstic-IShe wouldn't let me lock the
baby In the foldin' bed wen had com.
pany.-New York Weekly.
80 yOu are learning 10 SPELL are you
JOHNNY asked grandmamma. yes
grandma" was the reply. well. let
me hear you spell bread" II don't
believe l can, grandma" replied the
little FELLOW. But think II had
small piece Of cake could spell that"
Great Naitor-I think It would be a
good iaaa to print our circulation at the
hsad Of our editorial page. What's the
population Of this country Business
HaDager-About forty million. Great
EditOr-well. Wen not claim a circu.
lation Of over thirty-hve million. Nc
use exaggerating.
Teacher-Where is Russian Inter
val of dead silence. "Come, now
come. come; you ought to be ashamed
Of yourselves not to know where Rus
sia u. especially just now. Where iS
itT' Tommy knows, teacher. Teach,
Gr-wen. wherer Tommy-Up aI
bloomin' tree, teacher!
Yeast-They say babies are never
seasick. CrlmSonbeak-Well that &C.
counts for something, Yeast-WhatG
thatl Crimsonbeak-When waa
crossing. last summer, saw q man
az sick as he could be, singing Back.
ward, turn backward, o Time, in your
fight; make me a child again, just for
tonight t"-Yonkers Statesman.
IT want half pound of water crack.
ers," said Mrs. Newcome. "All-nred
SORRY. ma'am." replied the country
storekeeper, but amt got but two
dozen Of 'em in the place. "Well, III
take them" Jest wait ten, twenty
minutes. HI Peters an Josh Slocum
has been usin' them fur checkers, an
they're piayin' the decidin' game now"
Mrs. Morton (angrily)-Tommy Hor.
ton, what made you hit my little John.
nyi Tommy Horton-He struck me
with q brick. Mrs. Morton (more an.
grily)-well, never let me hear Of your
hitting him again. II he hits you, you
come and tell me- Tommy Horton
(snseringly)-Yes; and what would you
COT Mrs. Morton-Why, I'd whip him.
Tommy Horton Qn dlsgust)-What he
hits me with q brick, and you have the
fun OF licking him for it, Not much
nanIa-n~ Eak nnAVrnah