The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-03-07

'sPlay some games of domlnoeS anu
drink some beer"
million. men come home at midnight to |
face DER wives ind try to lie oudt OF |
It und hat awful times. BY golly, but |
It makes my hair stand COP to think
of it,
"Vheu?" 1 says.
'.Vhel don't you pellet it would be
better for a man to come in der night
und find his wife in bed fast asleep /
und dreaming of angels? Den he can
take 1fe minutes to get his clothes OF
und say his prayers und half not
drink, und nopody calls him thief una
a murderer and says she Will hat two
divorces und three alimonies right
away cueek-"
SAYS.
Is. of course 1t vhas. 1t vhas shust What
DER married man of der world hat been
seeking to bring about for der last ten
tousand years, but it vhas left for your
old friend Voglestein to solve der prob
lem. Hans, shake hands nit der big
best man in America. When nopody
can remember Shakespeare or Napo-
leon, der name of Voglestein WAS
heard everywhere. Peoples on one side
of der street Will cry Oudt, 'Voglestein.
Voglestein Who vhas Noglestein?
Und der peoples on der odder side vhlll
answer back, 'Didt you say Noglesteln?
Oh he's all right Dot VhaS der vhay
me if I vhas sOoch a proud man dot L
can't speak to der street cleaning man
ash I comes by him2 Yes, sir. she vhas
proud day for me, but if you like to
send oudt dot GROWER l vhas not too
proud to drink some beer init you"
Der saloon peesness vhas frozen oop
to zero says, ash 1 works at an old
she's
'Und so vhas II says voglestein;
tsnd he sits down und looks at der wall
und don't speak to me for twelve min
utes. He gets lonesome by-und-by
hOweffer. ind says:
'Vhen, you keep your old GROWER
und When I go oudt I drink champagne
Yes. by golly I swim in champagne i
I want to. You don't hat so moOcl
brains as a knOthole, under you 81
around like a stuffed sausage, but
Will go on aboudt dot invention. Sh
vhas bound to revolutionize der world
She Will supersede rapid transit un'
knock der spots off of six pure Havana
cigars for a quarter. When / VIA
rolling by in my carriage you shall tax
off your hat to me. ind I Will brini
you my oldt shoes to mend"
But how does dot invention in
went?"
"Shust ash easy ash grease. Hans
Tonight like to go oudt nit my friend
Hammerfeldt und play some games c
dominOes und drink some beer. Mayp
we also go by some concert hall ind b
gay 1t Will be more ash midnigh
Wention Mrs. NOglestein vhas waitin
oop for me. Shust ash queek ash
gets in der house she begins to cry un
scream und call names und in fife mir
utes der row vhas awful 1t don't d
some good to tell her dot 1 goes by dc
- country to hunt some 'coons. or dot m
lodge has some banquets und don't l,
oudt- She holers ind screams IN
pulls hair, und my life vhas made $
wretched dot 1 like some street cars
run oafer me ind pay $4,000 damage
Can you feel how it vhas, Hans?"
MAYBE 1 can. but I don't see son
invention yet"
Dot invention comes in right here
goes by der drug store nit der toothacl
and buys some laudanum. When it vh;
supper time / pour some in nv wife
tea speak to her dot 1 shall stay hon
dis ea1enlngs und haf some good tim
reading book, ind she smiles und VII;
glad.
Before O'Clock she mods her head III
vhas sleepy. ] tell her it vhas der co
weather ind some microbes arOundt b
in half an hour she goes to bed Der Ia
thing she sees vhas me reading a b0,
und looking ash innocent ash babe
When she goes TO sleep she don't hear
more abOudt Mark Hannah nor DOT Pa
ANA canal till breakfast vhas ready
der mornings. DO you see, Hans-dO v
see2 You Vhas only Oldt bald-he
cobbier, but 1 guess you can see''
IF she vhas awake you don't find h
asleep When you come home" l saws
Dot vhas it, Hans-dot vhas der
Wention. I go oudt NIT Hammerfeldt Y
hat good times und I don't worry.
likes to go home at midnight but | Ike
him ou0t two hours later. When l rea
home all yhas warm md still and pea
full. Nopody vhas sitting oop fur me I
club NOBODY says I Vhas a liar und
drunkard. NOBODY screams und pour
on der wall und jumps for my hair. !
Hans. Der oldt cat sits und purrs, u