The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1904-12-02
THE WORM TURNED.
By PHIL HEmYNa.

wines superb and the cigars above II
preach, and II was while we were eT
joying the latter that peculiar feelin
came over me.
II was the sort of feeling that JAG
the Giant Killer must have experience
when he made up his mind to attack tn
giant My constitutional nervousness
was swept away, and then and there
resolved to do or die.
"I'll stand II no longeri" exclaimed
Stand what?" inquired Blissop.
'The tyranny of that woman" I re
piled. adding. with fine sarcasm-"th
woman who vowed to love. honor AM
obey me"
There's lot. of that about Margaret
don't think" said Blissop.
"A man ought to be master of his owl
house" went on.
Quite right" agreed Blissop.
''And the good book tells us that the
man is the head of the woman"
$50 he ought to be-"
| sand, by Jove. so he will bel" said
humping the table and breaking glass
"Bravo!" cried Blissop-whether at
my sentiments or no | did not pause to
consider, but, swelling with the valour
that was Initiating me, went on:
'As the French say 1T is the first step
that counts All that man has to do is
to put his foot down, and once the wom-
an sees that he means to be master, she
yields to the inevitable, and things go on
as they should"
There's no doubt that a woman Is
much happier when she's kept in her
proper position"
"Of course she is. Let's have another
drink"
We did not want any more wine, so we
had whisky and sodas, after which my
determination to effect an alteration in
my domestic arrangements was strength
ened.
II won't lose minute over It," OBJ
served Directly get home tonight
shall start my reorganization"
Suppose she kicks" suggested Bills
sop, who was well acquainted with my
wife's little peculiarities, "and begins to
throw things?"
well. | don't like the idea of strtk-
ing woman" replied; ''but, of course,
II she uses force l must play the same
game.
You won't knock her about?"
"Of course not. shall merely use suf-
fcient force to show her the folly of re-
sistance and bring ber to her senses"
"It's grand idea" said Blissop.
"Why don't you try it also?" I asked.
'I'll wait and see how it answers with |
YOU" he answered, cautiously. always |
thought that Blissop was bit of
coward.
Then we had more drinks, and 1t was
iust striking two when tried to let my
self in with my latchkey.
But there was something wrong with
the lock or the key. always think that
had put the latch down, but she
declares that l was trying to open the
door with my cigar-holder Anyhow,
after fumbling for some minutes l was
obliged to knock.
After rapping two or three times, I
leard footsteps on the stairs. and pres
,ntlv Margaret herself opened the door.
This is pretty time of night" she
aid ito drag anyone out of bed to come
md let you in"
Don't talk to me like that" rerlied,
ull of my new resolve. II am going to
liter things here, can tell you, and put
GU in your proper place"
What do you mean ?" she inquired
why, am the master of this house.
nd I'll have you to know It."
''Why, John. do believe you've been
she remarked
What If have" I retorted IF
hoose to drink, shall drink, and GER
ainly shant ask your permission"
Hadn't you better go to bed?" sug-
ssted the wife.
Certainly mott" replied. "Not until
We finished with you"
FINISHED with me?" repeated Mar
aret, with well-simulated astonish-
lent
Eyes, you've had your own way long
lough, and it's my turn now" \
your turn for what?"
ITO be master in my own house."
why, you contemplate, drunken lit
9 whippersnapper!" cried Margaret,
her pent-up anger now finding vent
ow dare you talk to your wife like that!
ome here!"
And she stretched out her arm to lay
I'D OF me. D
Don't you touch me-" said. Don't Iy
u put finger on me. or won't be re- u
onsible for the consequences" al
'T'll take all the risks" answered Mar tie
ret. And then she got me by the collar bl
ID began dragging me about the floor. W
| tried to resist, somehow or other I ef
uld not keep my feet, and-well, it is
painful story, but this is true confess at
IN, and Margaret has really quite enor- NJ
Jus strength. The last thing remem- W
+ was being thrown underneath the co
d where must have gone to sleep. Oh, "
} next morning! Nv
Well. yes. did send in my resignation he
the club but 1t was never much use &C
me, for since my marriage scarcely fe
sr used IT, and signed the pledge. too, tn