davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06
SPEECHES THAT LIVE.
Oratoric Triumphs That stand the
Test of Reading.

1t Is often said that II speech reads
well II is not good speech. There
may be some truth In It. The reader
cannot, of course, get the impression
which the speaker conveys by look and
tone and gesture. He lacks that mar.
velous influence by which In a great
assembly the emotion of every indiyld-
ual soul is multiplied by the emotion of
every other. The reader can pause and
dwell upon the thought. If there be a
fallacy, he is not hurried away TO do
something else before he can detect It
So, also, his more careful and deliber-
ate criticism will discover offenses Of
style and taste which pass uDheeded In
speech when uttered. But still the
great oratoric triumphs of literature
and history stand the test of reading in
the closet ms well as of hearing in the
assembly. Would not Mark Antony's
speech over the dead body of Caesar,
had Ii been uttered, have moved the
Roman populace as 1t moves the spec.
tator when the play is acted or the SOL
ttary reader in his closet7 Does not
lea has resisted" reads well? Do not
Sheridans and Burke's great perora.
lions in the impeachment OF Warren
Hastings read well? Does not Liberty
and union, now and forever" read
we'll? Does not Give me liberty or
give me death" read well? Do not Ev-
erett's finest passages read well2-Sen
etor Hoar In Success.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06
CHOICE MISCELLANY


A story current in Washington just
now tells of the house hunting expert
ence of a certain senator from the
northwest whose romantic marriage to
Delaware lady recently received
much attention In the press.
1t appears that the senator was
shown through one swell mansion by
the owner thereof in person, Il woman
OF considerable moment in Washington
society.
Il am not at all anxious TO lease my
house during my absence from this
country" explained the lady, 'as |
shall Of course have to let it furnished,
and have feared to do that because of
the expensive fittings | have placed in
it. In your case, however" she added,
Il shall be only too glad to rent you
the house knowing, as | do, that in
your hands there will be no danger that
my furniture Will not be we'll taken
care of. | Will lease for $i,5OO.'
The senator did not reply. but contin-
ued to gaze out of the window. just as
he had done all through the woman's
talk
why, senator she exclaimed. what
on earth are you looking mt 50 intent
lyf'
I'm not looking ut anything in par
tieular" he replied softly. I'm think
Ing
Thinking" echoed the lady
YES. " answered he I'm thinking
or rather wondering what il should
take your house ! should do with the
remaining $500 Of NY salary
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06
The Old North state.

North Carolina. with It's AREA OF As
Goo square miles and its stretch of 500
miles from end to end is so immense
and its interests are SO varied that
the people at one extremity have little
idea OF what those at the other are
like or what they are doing. and in q
modified way this Is true of those be-
tween the eXtremities-thcy are not
acquainted with their fellow citizens
OF either the east or west and know
only in general way what they are
doing 1t Is only, for instance, 175
miles from Charlotte to the sea, yet II
will surprise "A good many people here
TO know that the Bank of Carteret at
Beaufort recently paid out $4,000 to
fishermen. but this is stated as a fact
Certainly North Carolina is rich in the
three only original sources of wealth,
the earth. the water and the forests
Charlotte (N. O. Observer.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06
EPlGRAMS OF NOVELISTS.

One crawls into friendship. one oeea-
sionally drifts into matrimony. but In
love one Frankfort Moore.
There is no place like the top, espe
cially when it is narrow and will not
hold many at time-Anthony Hope.
Love and friendship are stronger
than charity and politeness. and those
who trade upon the latter are rarely
accorded the former.-Seton Merriman.
1t is the Americans regret that ut
present he can do nothing with his feet
while he is listening at the telephone,
but doubtless some employment will be
found for them in the coming age.-Ian
Maclaren
There are two objectionable sins In
this world, success and failure. Those
who succeed can't forgive fellow for
being a failure and those who fail
can't forgive him for being a success
G. H. Lorimer.
There are two classes of people in the
world, the people who are clever and
the people who are keen. and you must
never mix the two. They meet and
touch, they are necessary to each other,
but they never never blcnd.-Kather-
Inc Cecil Thurston
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06
READING IN BED.
A Custom That Has Been Followed
by Many Writers.

Johnson told Boswell once in the
course of conversation, il which he
praised the Anatomy" that a man, if
inclined to melancholy, should have a
lamp constantly burning In his bed
chamber during the night land If wake
fully disturbed take a book and read
and compose himself to rest" There
can be little doubt that in thus indi-
eating an appropriate course for any
one afflicted with constitutional mel
ancholy" - his own trouble - lie was
stating his own practice. Many book
the wakeful doctor must have turned
over in the silences of the night. and
this increases the wonder that n desire
to read any particular work should
take him out of bed unusually early.
Gray must surely have been n reader
In bed. \ man who wished to be for
ever lying on sofas. reading eternal
new novels of Crebillon and Mari
Yaux," must have been familiar with
the faces of his favorites in the night
hours Elijah Fenton. a now forgotten
coadjutor OF Pope. was accustomed TO
lie abed ut his lodgings. we are told.
and be fed with spoon, but Grays
love of ease was not of this type. Gray
was b0ukmHu and most hookmPn
probably have INDUCED in the habit of
reading in bed. Lamb apostrophized
his folios as my midnight darlings,"
but those huge armfuls," as he calls
them. were not bedside books. They
were the companions Of the long hours
Of candlelight in the back room of the
quiet little "Edmbogish colored' house
beside the Chase Mt Enfield. Wycher
ley, one of the artificial" dramatlsts
for whom Lamb wruic a quaint de
Tense. made n habit of reading himself
10 sleep Nightly lie shared his pillow
with his favorite authors Seneca.
MontaigHe and Roehefoucauld- in
the mornings made Il practice Of writ
ing ON those subjects which had caught
his attention during the previous
nights reading. with the curious
though not unnatural result. as Pope
has testified, that his writing was un
consciously mere echo of his reading.
Somewhat later. when Grub street
hourished. il so Inappropriate a verb
may be allowed. many poor wretch
Of a hack author was glad To write as
we'll as to read in bed for the all sutti-
Client reason that seemly clothes were
lacking for going ahroad.-London
Globe
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06

Women are growing quite embar-
rassingly frank about the basis and the
crown OF their charms. On Saturday
afternoon pretty young married wom-
an, with her iiveyear-old son-so much
we could infer-jumped into first
class carriage on the underground. Aft
er her came three friends, two girls and
a man. Eyes, I'd never be without my
wig" said the pretty woman. ut isn't
as il hadn't enough hair OF my own.
Celia can vouch for that" Celia nod
ded-we all looked for Celia's nod.
why, the other Sunday we were
lunching at Wimbledon, one of those
damp, muggy days. Margaret was
herewith her fringe all over her eyes.
Mine was all right, and yet Margaret
has maid and l haven't. I've worn
a wig for three years, and | don't care
who knows It," The rest of us-stran-
gers-held our breath till the tale was
told.-London Chronicle.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06

Concerning very modish woman
the late Julian Rix, painter and critic,
had this story to tell.
mfr Rix, I've come TO ask you a
great favor" she said as she fairly
burst into his studio one fall day.
Everything l have is at your COM
mand, madam"
Il want to show you some coats of
arms and ask your advice about max
Ing a choice"
(Which side OF the family do you
wish to follow, maternal or
"Oh, neither. The herald says | can
choose any OF these. want something
that will look well on whist counters"
yes. Well, what about thls?'
THAT will do nicely But don't you
think ought to have more than one ?
| do tire so quickly Of things. you
know. New York Times.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06
CATS SUCKING BREATH.
An Old wives Fable Tint Has Served
a Good Purpose.

Can cat really suck the breath Of
child?
We have always heard that it could.
Away back in early childhood we dis
tinctly remember frequent warnings
to look out for the cat. DO not allow
the cat to get into bed with you, espe-
claly to get into bed with the baby as
1t is liable to suck the baby's breath,
which would cause the baby to die.
Is there any foundation for such
notion as this? We never could discov-
er any real meaning 10 the belief that
cat can suck the breath of n child.
Indeed the sentence is totally unintel-
liglble
What is meant by sucking the breathe
1t may be true that the cat attracted
by the breath Of child who had re-
Gently been nursing. might attempt to
interfere in some manner with the
child's mouth In young eats the i'm
pulse to nurse might he excited by the
smell of the childs breath. II is bare
ly possible that the cat might he seized
with desire 10 bite or To devour the
emu lii'S or '"ik"'' iu'e' On p' ''i'
smell of milk. We are not in posi-
ton to deny these possibilities. Maybe
'iieY are III ...=z=. -
f'it ',o' any 81 ti'''S' s'i'l'''s.a,3''s '','
his'i ""s'S ~ ~ H,"'''','' II ','"' vac
sat i ''a''tt Il S4tA '''s 'st''a '''A'''.
NJ i'' a."a ','''N ''i.s '''.'''' ~
Win S''"e'4ei 81 .''' W = seems ~
'aAA'A 80 "'"N+ ''' M "ah.N'
I'M "a" ''4't'+A ~ ''''" '''''4 '"' il =
; s.''1' ''.4as ssts 81 q M" -
s''..3 :" "a "a =
- VIZ N1a'" ."' - aie'tt''> d" 'V
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06

Addison Miner likes to run an auto
mobile. but he has never been granted
"A chauffeurs license The other day he
was speeding through the park when
he encountered policeman. who. see
ing no number on his machine hailed
him aud demanded to see his license.
4 haven't any said Miner, hut I'm
going down as fast rs | can TO get it"
He was allowed TO go. and presently he
was stopped by another officer who
wanted to see his license. Il am on my
way to give an exhibition of my skill In
order to get one" said Miner. Again
he was permitted 10 depart, but a few
moments later he encountered another
uniformed functionary. who halted him
and he repeated the statement that he
was on his way to give an exhibition.
Very we'll" said the officer; this Is
the place where the exhibitions are
given. Get busy"
Its no use" said Miner Il haven't
the 81 to pay for the license San
Francisco Table Talk.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06

With regard to the training of u
beagle, he has to be treated on quite n
different plan from the setter and
pointer In their cases great deal of
work of training is to conquer natural
propensities, whereas with the beagle
you encourage him to go on and do all
he can in seeking and chasing when
found. Young dogs are usually put
down with an older one. and very
few lessons suffice. 1t comes as nat
ural to a beagle to run scent as for
terrier to kill rats. and II there is no
apparent inclination one lesson usually
provokes 1t. The less one interferes
with beagle running line the better
for the dog. so long as he is not potter
Ing In one well tested place, but casting
all about when he has lost the trail
Field and Stream.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06

Those who are permitted to speak the
open truth in Russia may be counted
on the fingers of one hand, and then
half of them will be left unused. Why
these people are tolerated Is one of the
secrets of state. Outside OF these only
those who write works of fiction, which
the majority OF the people cannot and
do not read, are permitted to speak Of
things as they are. When they exceed
the limits of Russian decency and
speak too openly, they are given trip
TO Siberia ut the expense of the gov
eminent. Siberia is the place where
the boldest, the most courageous and
most talented products of Russia are
put on cold storage.
1t Is the coolest part Of the country,
and honest people are sent there when
the country becomes too hot for them.
When the innocent tourist asks, Where
are your honest peoplef" Siberia Is
pointed out TO him. If he asks more
questions, he Is himself sent there. The
government objects to questions on gen.
eral principles. Russia refuses to be
interviewed.-B. G. Richards in Reader
Magazine.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06
ANIMALS WITH HANDS.
The Use of the Paws In Conveying
Food to the Mouth,


Kangaroos use their hands very
readily to hold food in and to put it to
their mouths. AS their fore legs are so
short that they have to browse in a
STOPPING position, they seem pleased
when able to secure a large bunch of
cabbage or other vegetable provender
and to hold II In their hands to eat.
Sometimes the young kangaroo, look
ing out of the pouch, catches one or
two of the leaves which the old one
drops, and the pair may be seen each
nibbling at the salad held In their
hands, one, so to speak, zone floor"
above the other. In "Alice In Wonder
land" the lizard is always making
notes on slate and then trying to rub
them out again with his fingers. Many
lizards feet are so like hands that 1t
Is rather surprising that they are only
used for running and climbing. But
that is the main purpose to which
lizards apply them. The slow, DELHI
crate clasping and unclasping or
chameleon's feet look like the move
ments which the hands of sleep
walker might make were he trying to
creep down the banisters. The chame-
Icons are almost deformed hands, yet
they have a certain superficial resem-
blance TO the feet of the parrots, which
more than other birds use the foot for
many of the purposes of hand when
feeding.
To see many OF the smaller rodents
ground squirrels. prairie dogs and mar
mots-hold their food. usually in both
paws, Is To learn a lesson in the dex-
ferrous use of hands without thumbs
Rats and mice do not, as rule,
"clinch" what they hold but merely
support 1t in their paws. the move
ments being much less human than
they appear Nothing more readily sug-
gests the momentary impression that
pretty little monkey is remotely "a
man and n brother" than when he
stretches out his neat little palm. fin
gers and thumb. and with all the move.
ments proper to the civilized mode OF
greeting insists on shaking hands. But
no one feels In the least inclined to
grasp the clawed digits of any OF the
rodents which use their paws to hold
food. They are only "holders," cot
Spectator.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06

In days when tavern hrawls in Eng
land We're frequent and swords were
out on the slightest proyoeatiou com
mon fairness demanded that the blades
of chance combatants should be OF
equal length In sudden ARRAY
there would be- no thought Of measur-
ing swords, SO the authorities took the
matter into their own hands mt the
gates of the city of London where
every gallant MAS liable To be chal-
lensed, and II the public official found
any blade beyond thirty six inches
the smith Stood by to snap off the steel
10 the required length. In Queen Eliz-
abeth's reign this was the common
practice.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06
A TIRELESS WORKER.
The Marvellous Energy That Was .
Part of Macnulay.

No life was ever lived at higher pres
sure than that of Macaulay. He was
not only like a book In breeches," as
Sydney Smith said of him; he was also
like an intellectual steam engine. His
thirst for knowledge WAS only equaled
by his amazing capacity for retaining
knowledge and by his passionate inter
est In all the aspects of life. Il wish
| knew rs much of anything as Ma
caulay knows of everything" said Mel
bourne, and, though the epigram may
have been intended as a glbe. 1t ap-
proxlmated to the truth. To the aver
age dullard of the world 1t must have
seemed that this tempestuous man was
literally omniscient He plunged into
Italian like boy rejoicing In new
toy; he took up Spanish with an appe-
tite growing by what 1t fed on, and
then he returned to Greek with joy
which he found indescribable. He
amused himself in going to India by
learning German and mltigated the dis
tress of voyage across to Ireland by
committing paradise Lost" to men,
ory, claiming, doubtless with truth,
that II by any inconceivable mischance
the great epic were to be utterly de-
stroyed he could from the tablets Of his
memory give 1t back TO the world
London News.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06

Canals in England date back to an
early period, for the Romans built two
in Lincolnshire-the Foss dixie. forty
miles long and still navigable. and the
Caer dixie The first British made ca
nal was constructed in 1874 by Henry
1t was toward the end of the eight
ecnth century that the greatest amount
of energy was expended in the building
of canals. mainly due to the Duke OF
Bridgewater and the skill OF his en-
gineer, James Brindley. In the last
decade of that century canal mania
ragged
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06

Puget sound is one OF the finest har>
bors In the world, II not the finest-a
deep bay over hundred miles long
cut Off from the ocean by the noun
famous western peninsula OF Washing
ton. The waters nearly everywhere are
deep. the shores abrupt, and the tide 10
moderate. Ships may go from Tacoma
half way to Alaska without passing
out OF this great sound and its extern
In Century.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06

Freshly made bread is more indi-
geStihle than stale bread because it il
more moist and becomes more solid
in the mouth; hence more impenetra-
bic To the saliva and the gastric juices
For the same reason bread crust IL
more digestihle than what Is beneath
II, being drier- Bread may be unfit
for use from being made of adulterat-
ed or too old flour, 10y turning sour or
developing bitter taste from the
yeast from getting moldy and from
insufficient Fermentation in the rising
process, which leaves it ta0 heavy for
the digestive fluids to act well upon
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06
The Care of Children.

1t is usually accepted without ques-
tlon that the modern scientific meth
DDS used In the care and bringing up
of infants tend To increase the average
duration Of human life Mr. Charlton
I. Lewis, writing in Harper's Weekly.
presents different view When in
fnnts We're treated with less wisdom,
lie points out. the weaker persisted and
the stronger survived. When the sick
are cared for So that a large number
recover from disease. II IS inevitable
that on the average those who are thus
rescued must be weaker than the com
munity to which they are restored.
Thus all these Influences. says Mr..
Lewis in conclusion, while saving life.
tend especially to save lives which
are feeble In Il greater proportion than
those which are strong ANA thus in the
end must lower the vitality of the
great mass Of the population"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06
The Charge Sustained.

The householder was duly sworn.
You charge this man with being in
sane" said the court. "On what do
you base the charger"
well, your honor" said the witness,
vainly trying to choke down his emo
ton. this man is plumber. My
pipes were out of fix. sent for him.
He fixed 'em in fifteen minutes. When
asked for his bill he said that was all
right, because 1t didn't take him long.
and he had another job in my neigh
borhood anyhow"
"A hopeless caser' exclaimed his hon.
or as he signed the commitment
Baltimore News.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06

Once, SO the story goes, Emperor
Nicholas of Russia asked List to play
In his presence. The musician COM
piled, but during the performance the
ear started a conversation with an
aid-de-camp. List stopped playing at
once. The ear asked what was the
matter when the emperor speaks"
said List, "every one must be silent"
The car smilingly took the hint. and
the Dlayinr proceeded
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06
Earning IA Spanking.

Mrs. Brown was downtown yes
tcrday. | didn't know but might
meat You Mrs Greene | was down
town. too, and I'm awfully sorry
didn't see You. Little Johnny Greene
Ma, don't you remember we saw Mrs.
Browns dog and vou said: Come. let's
hurry away from here That old eat
must be somewhere near" What old
cat did you mean, MAJ
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06
higgins IiIundrr.

higgins is very unfortunate in his
love affairs"
Yes" said the girl with yellow halr
You see, Mr.. Bliggns makes the great
mistake of trying 10 converse intclh-
gently when he ought TO be simply
holding hands and looking az II me
were stupcded with joy. Exchange.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06

Smith (seeinE beggar bearing sign
reading. deaf and Dumb")-rd like to
help this poor fellow. but l don't know
how TO ten whether he is really deaf
and dumb.
Beggar (softlyl-Read the sign. mis-
ter; read the sign.-lndianapolis jour
nal
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06

Charles" said Miss rassay coyly.
speaking Of her tance lis quite in
divldual. He is different from other
men"
"Of course. he's willing 10 be en-
gagged 10 YOU replied Miss sharpe
Exchange
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06
lInthrnnf prcmicrs

Tie late Lord salisbury shared with
Mr. Gladstone s disregard for clothes.
and several times lis attire MAS Tt
feHF..a ta with regret hy Sartorial writ
e-> - bong a. aI> coat hung fairly
UeH from The shoulders the deceased
premier cared uti1e. bDt he never went
tae #sngfa q Ar Gladstone. whose
clothes were ofteu - shabby that only
aa e45aeu, person Mould MAI them
Iars Sal>Narx,s hats We're enormous
S1airS. quite e4uallns Mr Gladstone'S
N size and much maee respectable. In
deed Mr. Gladstone'> headgear was
generally in the shocking bad hat"
category While in attendance in the
commons Mr. Gladstone dressed fairly
well. but outside the house he paid lit
tie attention to his garments The sue
cessors In office Of the great departed
are. ON the other hand. careful dressers.
especially Lord RoSehery. who designed
a collar for himself with the turnover
peaks rounded for greater comfort and
durability. Mr. Balfour's appearance is
usually very smart on social occasions.
although he seemingly does not endeay-
or to attain the we'll groomed condition
OF Mr.. Chamberlain London Men and
Women
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06

Doubtless the most unique spot in Eu-
rope is the village of Altenberg. on
whose border three countries meet. II
is ruled by no monarch. has no soldiers,
no police and no taxes. Its inhabitants
speak curious jargon of French and
German combined and spend their days
sn cultivating the land or working in
khe village boasts.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06

She-l just know you don't love me
as much as you did.
He-But. darling. how can you think
that?
Because you are not half so foolish
Us you were" Life.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-04-06
He Knew.

This is rather an unusual hour for
you to be going to lunch. Not hungry
SO early. are your
mo, but l Will be by the time the
waiter condescends to notice mo- Ex.
change