The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1904-01-29
THE NONPAREJL MAN

/ Essay on Observation-Disclosures Of III.
1 chesty Statesman Of 1910 and His Dis
appearance from Our Politics with the
! Advent of Lincoln In 1s6o-The Develop.
n1ent Of chestlness In the Twentieth
Century Shown to Be Along Financial
LInes-"The New chestlness."
We were speaking in the exchange
room the other day of the character of
statesman the country used to affect in
| 1870 or thereabout. Nearly all the states
men OF that day were built on the DAN
lei Webster plan Now the Daniel Web
ster style was a sort of high class chesti-
| ness. To-day our statesmen affect the
plain, common people, no nonsense atti-
tude, but in 1910 you had to be chesty or
you were not the real thing. The chesfy
statesmen Of 1870 was built on the. old
Roman senator lines with a toga about his
form and a touch Of American federalism
to give 1t added dignity.
The advent of Lincoln in 1860 was a
severe blow to chestiness in our politics
and from that time on political chestiness
fell into a mild decay.
Yet now and then you find politician,
usually or the peeWee sort, who affects
| chestiness of voice and manner and who
has an idea that by it he is impressing
the rude commonalty with his importance,
But he is wrong. The rude commonaItv
loves the hale-fellow- welI-met variety
with the union label on him who spits on
the platform and tells stories. It will be-
some time before we have another chesty
president.
Yet there is still chestiness abroad and
IL should be rebuked. L. H. Robbins in
the Newark News throws off a little
rhyme on the chesty man which is good
enough to reprint. He says:
Be chesty to the Folk at Home
And Speak with Chesty Voice,
A Chesty little Word or Two
VIII make their Hearts Rejoice,
De Chesty to the Little Child
That rcmps the long day thru,
From Your Example It may grow
AS Classified You.
Be Chesty to the Aged too;
Ihey have no greater Joy
IMAM gazing on the Pride Of One
Ihey harbored when a boy.
Be Chesty to the Lucky Few
OF friends You may select.
For friendship cannot live unless
Compounded with Respect
Be Chesty to the Common Herd
Use Chest notes in locution: ...
Thus only can Social Scheme
be saved from Dissolution,
Live aye broadly Chester Life.
Dispensing Frown on All,
And Gladly will the Curious come
To see Your Funeral.
The latest form of chestiness that has
made itself apparent in the republic is not
political but a financial chestiness. 1t is
the great captain of-industry chestiness,
sort OF railroad presidency chestiness.
we DO things, we don't talk about
them! What do you know about affairs?
What have you ever done? Here, door,
keeper, show this man out"
Ihats a form Of chestiness before which
the peewee melts away like an autumn
leaf in a blizzard.
., come now, why be so almighty Wa
were all boys once and went into the Same
old swimming hole and put boards over
the same old schoolhouse chimney to-
gether.
-, Lets come off and not be so chesty.
They're all ION to u.s.
When the mercury at st, Louis fooled
around zero, the Filipinos at the fair
ground began to think they were against
something real and retired into their
shells.
The rumor that the price Of coal would
drop notch on Feb. was smilingly put
ASIDE by our genial coal purveyor" yes
terday: Still it might drop and he not
know it. 'tS ~lh'~a45stAsss1 GEEl
Bourke Cochran says that "the most
melancholy sight in the world is a mil.
llonalre face to face with his securities
II we are ever put in that position we feel
sure of being able to inject little merri-
ment into the situation
A cotton picking machine has been inx
vented but the real need Of the hour il
a machine that will sack ashes from the
basement without leaving a trail or ex-
pectorating on the cellar stairs.
A obi no1
cradle Whiskers and weight SAYS that
there is no medical remedy for pneumonia
and that drugs are useless, but that the
patient is ''caused by the moral effect" Of
ne doctors presence. So is his estate.
Desiccated platform Of 1896 and canned
ssues of 1900 will be spread ON the ban.
luet table at st. Louis.
> A Yankee from Herkimer county, New
complained that right under his hotel win.
low Scotch piper stopped and turned
Dose what sounded like about two rods
u bad stomach-ache. Several Scotchmen
seriously resented this description of the
rational music.
The old line democrat feels convinced
nat at st. Louis this time Bryan will
tand about as much chance as a snow.
rift in-the Philippines.
The congressional committee on the
Utah dispute was sitting in star chamber
ess1on the other day and, pending the
ppearance of an absent member or two.
we're engaged in the national game. AS it
cared the crisis. the Johannespot on the
able having been graced by several
weetenings, the honorable gentleman
rom Nebraska called. The gentleman
rom Nevada threw down pair of queens
nd remarked briefly, Ladies' The 9th.
RS hes1tated and looked at the gentle-
ian from Utah
What you got, Smooth inquired the
onorable member from Texas tentatively.
"A full house." replied Mr.. Smoot
The committee Immediately arose and
ound the member from Utah guilty OF
olygamy with a recommendation for
lercy." "A. r r.
ALA7AsTER's soNNETs
Bertram Dobell has come into posses,
n a mo Snrsr,k