The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1904-12-17
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Mx-Congressman LATE Pence tells a I
story Of an old lady who always knew
everything before anybody else. One
day her niece saw her passing the
house, and ran out to meet her. "Do |
come In, aunty," she begged, sand help
US. We are making charades.'' Ger
tainly / will" answered the old lady;
Il knew you were making them, be-
cause I smelt them as came along"
Clyde Fitch tells a new story Of
Whistler. The artist was In Paris at
the time Of the coronation OF King Ed
ward, and at a reception one evening
IA duchess said to him: II believe YOU
know King Edward, Mr.. whistler"
"No, madame" replied Whistler.
why, that's odd" she murmured; 81
met the king at dinner party last
year, and he said that he knew YOU"
"oh," said the painter, "that was just
his brag."
Susan B. Anthony, ON her return
from Europe, talked in an engaging
way about the things she had seen
over there. OF certain slum she said:
''The children in this slum are dirty,
very dirty. hardly know how r.
make clear to you the superlative de-
gree Of drtiness that marks them. /
was told, for one thing, that mother,
In this slum, often goes out on the
street and washes half dozen chill
dren's faces before she Is able to find
her own child"
Grover Cleveland once ran across a
little girl acquaintance who was fish
ing, and who had no bait on her hook.
you can't catch fish without bait"
said the statesman. But don't like
to put the bait on the hook" answered
the little girl, deprecatingly; "the
worms wriggle so. They won't keep
still while I put them on. If you'll
put the bait on for me I'll let you have
the fish, Mr.. Cleveland, If 1 catch
one" "Ha! hay' laughed the ex-Presi-
dent; ''this isn't the first time I've met
with such proposition. Give me your
hook, little politician"
Some physicians recently were play
fully discussing the diplomacy to be
employed with young mothers. when
l am called to house where there is
a baby whose sex I do not know
said one, II am always embarrassed
as to how to speak of it. A mother
likes you if you ask her How Is the
little girl? or How is the little boy?'
as the case may be, as she usually
takes a pride in the sex Of the child,
whichever it is" One of the most IA
nous physicians in the world re-
marked: IT never have any trouble in
that respect. 1 make it rule to call
all babies whose sex Is unknown to
me Francis The mother doesn't
know whether I spell it with an or
an e, and all she thinks is that l have
forgotten the small darling's real
name, and that is deemed excusable."
The following is given by Kobu
Tendzui as a typical Japanese humor-
GUS story: The term "Yabu" Is ap-
piled to doctors who prescribe wrong
+ medicines. Now, it happened once that
a quack having been the means Of
killing the only son of certain house,
the parents determined to have their
revenge on him. So they sued him at
court Of law. The affair was eventu-
ally patched up by the worthy quack
giving the bereaved parents his own
son In return for the one he had killed
Not long after this event, the said
quack heard loud knocking at his
door one night. On going to the door
he was informed that one of his neigh
bors wives was dangerously Ill, and
that his presence was required al
once. Turning to his wife, he said
"This requires consideration, my dear
There is no knowing but that it may
end in their taking you from me-"