The Savannah morning news. (Savannah, Ga.) 1900-current, 1904-06-19

rule. In spite OF the apparently great
number of divorces, the vast mass of
the race remains fond of marriage.
1t suits them. 1t meets their needs.
It is what they want.
II will tell you what is the real cure
for love, the thing that will kill 1t as
surely and irremediably as the action
of any law of nature. 1t is a DISPOSE
tion on the part of either one of the
parties to control the movements of
the other And when we consider the
vast number of marriages in which
the husband tries to control the wife,
or the wife tries to control the hus-
band, and see how they still go on
living together, we can explain it only
by the fact that we are so accustomed
to slavery that we don't know what
freedom is, like the old slaves of the
South; or else, that married people
take their freedom secretly. When a
person cannot escape this eternal
espionage openly; he will escape it Sc
cretly. If this sense of monopoly this
sense of control, this sense of continual
espionage exists, it will kill love inev-
itably in the one who feels and suffers
from it.
THE other night I listened to a
young man till 1870 O'Clock in the
morning, telling me the tale of his
married unhappiness. 1t had to come
got it. If had been a wooden Indian
it would have done just as we'll. 1t
was volcano that had to erupt. He
said: You know my wife. 1 married
her two years ago. She was, and is,
everything that a woman should be.
l loved her passionately. Otherwise
there was no earthly reason why
should have married her. At the end
of eight months my love died. Since
then I've been in Hades.
81 said. 'Why?'
Because she won't let me out of
her sight, said he. She's learned
typewriting, and comes down to my
office to be my secretary can't get
away from her an hour out of the
twenty-four. It's driving me mad. !
urged her for month to go and see
her folks. Now she's gone for three
weeks, and I like her better to-day
than I have any time for the last year
and a half
Il said, Why don't you tell her all
this?'
He said, "It would break her
heart
81 said, My young friend. you are
| egotiStic.'
"He said, We'll, perhaps am. But
| to deliberately tell her that I'm tired
| of her; that 1 can't bear her around
| lief from her. I simply can't do it.
| It's too brutal
We'll, you'll have to do it. said
! I, or sooner or later there'll be 'an
explosion that will break hearts for
sure. Human nature can't stand that
kind of strain continuously
Now, do you suppose that is the
only boy in that state of mind in New
| York? No; there are thousands oil
| thpTa uo11 n fc low
give him his freedom. Don't ask where
he has been. Don't ask what's he
been doing. Don't keep any track Of
his movements Give him his freedom
| freely, royalty like a queen, and you
will have and keep a devoted lover, il
there is any thing in you to love
and there must be, if you can rise tC
that point of self-control and gener.
osity.
"And the other side of it is exactly
the same. Give a woman her free
dom, if you want to keep her love
OF course, if you like to play the des-
pot better than to retain your wife'f
love, all right. But you can't do both
| Assume no control over her move
ments. L believe most women like t.
have their husbands ask where they
have been, what they have been doing
You won't find out, if she doesn't wan
you to. any more than she will FIND
out if you don't want her to. Blu
she likes to think you want to know
Now, this is an unnatural feeling or
womans part. 1t seems instructive, but
it isn't. 1t comes because womer
haven't been used to so much freedom
as men have. Train her the other way
Train her to have her own private
life, and live 1t like an independent
being, and never think of giving ar
account of it; and after a while shell
like that better, and she will like yol
better too. And don't demand any.
thing of her that you are not pre-,
pared to give. If you come home a
2 a. m. and offer no explanation o
what has detained you don't say {
single word if she does the same. AND
what's more, don't feel any resentment
Make up your mind, once for all, t.
grant freedom. Demand freedom fol
yourself, and accord it to her, fully
and absolutely. In that way husbands
and wives come to be a pleasure t
each other, and not restriction. AnC
restriction, no matter how loving, il
time gals. Love cannot and will no
live under it.
with this basis of freedom, per.
fectly understood and gladly accorded
on both sides, marriages will not xii
love, no matter how long it lasts i
there is anything in either party tt
inspire love"