The St. Louis Republic. [volume] (St. Louis, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1904-02-01
WHY NOT

Jackson County Republicans are, of course, in
stined with the regular Utopian brand of harmon!
which fills their party generally in Missouri. The
Jackson County Republicans are divided into Fed
eraI officeholders and anti-Federal otficeholders
Each faction assembled in convention last week and
elected contestlng delegates to the Chicago conven,
ton. Both conventions instructed for Roosevelt
and each convention denounced the other.
Naturally enough, the anti-Federal otiiceholders,
being out of jobs and in Il poor way 10 get jobs,
We're the more bitter. They telegraphed the Presi-
dent:
Theodore Roosevelt, President OF the
United States, Washington: Regular but
anti-Federal oficeholders convention.
Fifth District Of Missouri. unanimously
indorse and instruct delegates for you for
President.
MesSrs. A. w. Burnett and A. J. Kelly, Jr, signed
the message, but it is not known who paid for the
telegram. That, however, is nonessential. The
anti-Federal ofticeholders did some rather pretty
resoluting. They protested against the criminal
practices resorted to- by the other fellows in Tues
days primary. The criminal practices were suggest
lively and c%olorfully described as ''the open pur-
chase Of votes, repeating and other scandalous and
dishonorable practices" And the resolute resolu-
tiers resoluted further to the effect that oficeholders
and employees openly bought votes, and. by threats
and intimidation, prevented the bona fde and non
oticeholding Republicans from having their druth-
ers. The resolutions concluded, as a matter of
course, with something about indicating the Re
publican party.
1t isn't on record what the other and officeholding
and non-bona fde Republicans thought or said about
their unemployed and disinterested brethren, but we
may assume that it was something at least sincere,
II mpolite-perhaps hungry outsiders" or "in-but-
tiers" or "four-fushers," or Amateurs The vocab-
ulary Of a Republican Missouri convention is yir-
tually inexhaustible.
Rather a diverting kind of harmony. After pc
rusing one Of the Globes Missouri Harmony" edi-
torials and then taking a look at harmony as she is
in Jackson County, the student of Re
politics feels like boarding a train for
Philadelphia. The Globes Elysian theories don't
with the visible situation; except now
and then, when, in the interests of its own group of
1t breaches on the evils of kicking up d
trail of dust to Washington in quest of pie.
But to return to Kansas City and the Jackson
County patriots-they might learn something from
the st. Louis s. o. p. The st. Louis 6. o. p. used to
consist of split halves. One half consisted of 'the
boys who could fix things and primaries, and
who called themselves the Hamilton Club. The
'ther half consisted of political philanderers, parlor
and ping-pong players who represented
yearning to do something and who went by the
Dig, ambitious name, st. Louis Republican Club. !
These split halves are now hyphenated. They are
10" known as the st. Louis-Hamilton Club, and are
ust as strong and harmonious as q hyphen can
make them.
There is much magic in a hyphen. Why not try
t on in Kansas City? The aggregation could ap-
adopt the euphonious title of the Jack
on County Jolly Jobholders Jobseekers,