The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1904-10-06

But he was writing very slowly.
Eps he, being illiterate. was undecidee n
20 whether he should use one or TWO
..p's'' In spelling H.
Yet he was writing rapidly.
But very slowly.
baltimore American
Amoug the Four Hundred.
"I can't imagine what made the
bridegroom so nervous
81 can"
"What?"
HE didn't have time to get his pro.
epective father-in-law's check certified
before the ceremony."-Chicago Post.
The new Relative.
Father-Arabella, do you know our
housekeeper Is going TO be married!
Daughter-Is that sol It's time the
old dragon Is getting out OF the u
Who is she going to marry?
Observation-Disclosures Commercial
Tribune.
A Transformatfon.
There was an itinerant cobbier
Who sat down to dine with a gobbler.
When the dinner was done.
There remained only one.
nj he was both cobbler and gobbler.
Good Housekeeping.
Mr.. c. "suppose."
Mrs. Crimsonbeak-This paper says
the jawbone of a whale Of average size
measures about seven feet In length.
Mr.. Crimsonbeak-It doesn't mention
the size Of the jawbone Of the female
whale, l suppose.-Yonkers Statesman
Very Swell.
Stubb-They are indeed rich.
Penn-Rich enough to own dia
monds?
Stubb-Far better. Rich enough to
own bulldogs.-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
A Man of Letters.
There once was a cunning J. p.
Whose warrants were dated A. D.;
They passed as o. X.
Till a fierce expose
Made ready signed warrants N. @.
Chicago Tribune.
Never Your Own.
"Do you really believe there is such
q thing In this world as perfect happi-
nessY"
"Of course, but some other fellow al
ways has it."-Denver News.
The Danger.
"Do you think that the automobile
will cause the extinction Of the horseT'
mot unless the horse persists in get
ting in the way" answered the chauf
.feur.-Washington Star.
Renance Of . Poor Young Man.
He bought a costly solitaire
To give to q maiden fair.
And he sighed. Yes. riches do have
For the witches must have rings."
Chicago Tribune.
Knew What struck Him.
Daly-Ye were sunstruck. We sayf
Why. man Rive, the sun could never
disflgure a mans face like that.
Riley-Ye don't know me son. DAILY.
Brooklyn Life.
Keep at II.
eff at first you don't succeed
Try. try again" and then
II you do succeed indeed.
Try even yet again.
Philadelphia Press.
Accepted and Filed.
"No. I make 1t a practice never &c
carry money around with me-"
what is your reasonY"
~ haven't any to carry."-Clevelan1
Plain Dealer.
Contin nous school.
Experience is a teacher
A teacher good and great
But under II no creature
Yet lived to graduate.
Brooklyn Life.
Her View of II.
Hell met Flora in a car yesterday.
md I gave her my seat.
She-Gracious! So she can't hide her
age even from you.-Chelsea (Massj
Gazette.
Slaughter.
The melancholy days are here,
And they are not a sham;
The farmer fats the turkey now
While Wall street kills the lamb.
New York Times.
Ugly Thing.
MY husband never speaks a cross
word to me-"
How long have you been separat.
edr.Cincinnati Commercial Tribune.
Henpeck speaks.
Friends. here's a truth that In az clear
As II Ia deep:
How can a fellows wife be dear
While talk In cheapf'
philadelphia Ledger.
Not That Kind.
Church-Her grandfather was a skip
per. and he settled In Canada.
Gotham-Indeed! How much did he
get away withf-Yonkers Statesman.
Too Much Repetition.
with hash and stew and potpie..
Cried Boarder Number One,
This doing roast beef over
Ii being ~overdone."