The semi-weekly messenger. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1897-1908, 1904-10-21
BY F. p. Dunno.
Copyright, 1904, by Mcclure, Phillips
& Coz

who is George Meredith" asked Mr..
Hennessy.
'TYe can search me-" said Mr.. Dooley.
What is tn charge again him?"
t.Nawthin'," said MIR. Hennessy. but
I sse he's in favor iv short term mar
redges."
What dye mean?' asked Mr. DooIey.
"Reducin' tn term FIR good behavyor?'
NO" said Mr.. Hennessy, He says
people ought to get marrid fr three
or four years at a time. Thin if they
don't like ZACH other or if wan gets
tired, they break up housekeepin'."
WELL said Mr.. Dooley. sit mightn't
be a bad thing. Tn throuble about
mathrimony as 1 have observed 1t firm
me seat in tn gran stand is that af-
Their fifteen or twinty years, 1t settles
down to an endurance thrile. Women
as Hogan says, are creatures Nv such
~beaucheous mien that to be loved they
have but TO be seen, but he says,
"wanst they're seen an made secure
he says, we first embrace, thin pity,
thin endure he says. Most Nv tn OF
marrid men 1 know threat their wives
like a rOckin' chair. a great comfort
whin they're tired but apt to be in tn
a at other times. Now, L might be
different if tn ladies instead iv bein' Sc
cured fr life was on'y held on a short
term lease. Whin Archybald, tn pride
iy south Wather sthreet. makes UP his
mine that it wud be we'll FIR his credit
If he enthered tn holy bonds iv mathri-
mony an selects tn target iv his mad
affections, he thinks tina all he has to
do is TO put a geeranyum in his button
hole an inthrajooce himsUf be his first
name to be carried to tn altar. But tn
ladies, Gawd bless Thin, are be nature
skilled in this game an befure Archy-
bald has been coortin' two weeks, he
begins TO shift his idees iv his own
worth. He finds that at best he has
ony an outside chance. He wonders
If he is really worthy iv tn love iv an
innOcint young girl iv thirty-two. Has
ne money enough to support her as she
shud be supported? He even has doubts
fr tn first time in his life iv his own
rayishin' beauty. He detects blemishes
that he niver see befure. He discovers
that what he used to considher a merry
twinkle is a slight cast in tn right eye
an that tn film shows in his teeth.
He consults a manicure an a hair
dhresser an buys tn entire stock iv a
gents furnishin' store. Thin whin he's
thurly humble, he goes thremblin' to
iBeinda's house raysolved that if tn
fair wan rayfuses him as she prob'bly
will an surely ought to, he viii walk
off tn bridge an end all.
It's at this time that tn short term
contract shud be sprung. I don't know
how men propose / niver thried it but
wanst an tn hired girl said tn lady
was not at home. Nc wan will iver tell
We. Most married men give We tn i'm
preSSyOn that their wives stole thin
firm their agOnized parents. But, amy.
how, We'll suppose that Archybald, lay
in a silk handkerchief on tn carpet an
pullin' up tn leg iv his pantaloons to
preVint bagSin', hurlS nimSilf impet-
ChOOSly at tn feet iv his adOred wan
an cries: Belinda. l can on'y offer we
tn love iY an honest South Wather
sthreet commission merchant an MINI
Der iv tn Brotherhood iv Wholesale an
Retail Grocers. Will ye take me FIR
life?' Belinda bushes a rosy red an re-
plies: Archybald, We ask too much I
cannot take We FIR life but I'll give We
a five year lease an resarve tn right
to renew at tn enc iv lat time she
says. will that do?' says she. 1 will
thry to make We happy says ne. An
she falls on his manly bosom al be-
tween her sobs, cries: Thin let us re-
pair a. wanst to tn Title Guarantee an
Thrust Comply an be made man an
wife she says.
We'll. 'afther Archybald is safely
married, his good opinyon iv himsilf
Belinda does her share to
encourage him an befure long, he be-
gins to w0ndher how as fine a fellow
as him come TO throw himilf away. Not
that she amt a good creature, dye
mind, an slavishly devoted to him. He
hasn't anything again her, still, think
iy what he might have done if he had
49, $500 IT, --@-NA n
man gets a good reputation, he doesn't
have to live up to ii. So bimby Archy-
bald, KNOWN firm what his wife says
that he is handsome enough without
amy ARTIFICIAL aid, f'rgetS tn NANNY
cure an tn hair dhresser. Sometimes
he shayes an sometimes he doesn't. SO
far as he is consumed, he thinks tn
Eaundhry bill is too high. He adyertises
Sh' fact that he wears a red flannel
chest protector. His principal conVar-
sation is about his lumbago. He fire.
auently munitions tn fact that he likes
certain articles iv food but they don't
like him. Whin he comes home at night,
ne plays with tn dog, ak poilytics
with his mex dure neighbor, puts his
hat an a pair iv cuffs on tn piannah,
sets down in front iv tn fire, kicks off
his boots an dhrawS on a pair iv carpet
slippers an thin notices that tn wife
iv his bosom is on tn premises. Hello,
oil woman he avs 'HowS all yeer
Chroubles?' he says.
'sWanst a year, Belinda meets him at
tn lure with a flower in her hair.
Well he says, what are the decora-
tons about?' he a Don't we know
what day this is?' a she. Sure
saws he: it's Choosdah.' No. but
what day?' L give it up. st. Patricks
Day, Valentin's Day, Pay Day.
What's tn answer But think I
give it up It's the a~nnyvasary iv
our weddin'.' Oh say he. so it is.
I'd clean f'rgot. That's right. 1 ray
mimber it well now that We mintlon 1t.
Well, betther luck mex time. There
take that he says. An he salutes her
on tn forehead an goes down In IN