davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05
A DentIst's Advice.

Toledo, Ohio, Jan. 25th.-Mr. Harry L.
Lewis, Dentist, 607 SUMMIT street, this city,
says: Il certainly advise anyone no matter
how severe they may have Kidney Trouble
to take Dodd's Kidney Pills.
Il was troubled with Kidney Disease for
several years and Dodd's Kidney Pills cured
me-, l had used many so-called remedies
without any benefit. Four months ago, l
was fat on my back with this painful trou-
BILE and must say that almost gave up hopes
of ever getting any better. Through a
friends advice / purchased six boxes Of
Dodd's Kidney Pills.
"At first could see but little benefit, but
after two weeks, could see an improvement.
/ had been getting up several times at night
When / had taken six boxes / felt better
than had for years. The pain had all
gone and didn't have to get up during the
night at all. / continued the treatment
until I had used several more boxes, and
now / am glad to say that l am completely
cured"
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05
UMBRELLA-sHApED SAIL.
Experts Are of the Opinion That Pras-
tically IL Does Away with All
Danger of Capsixing.

A sail that practically does away with
all danger of capsizing, since increased
wind pressure upon it does not tend to
tip the boat, has been invented in Eng
land. The desired results are attained
by making the sail like fiat umbrella
"a shape whose advantages have long
been recognized by yachtsmen, al
though until the past summer all at
tempfs to realize them practically have
been failures. Says Popular Mechan-
les:
At last the umbrella, or cyclone. sail
is a reality. Time and again attempts
have been made to construct sail of
this kind, but not until the past summer
have the efforts been satisfactory. The
umbrella sail, which is an English in
vention, is attracting attention of
yachtsmen in all parts of the world.
With this type of sail, small boat,
which could not safely carry to exceed
200 square feet of canvas with an ordi-
nary rig, can carry $50 square feet
without danger. In fact, the risk of be-
ing capsized is practically removed,
while the increased speed of the boat is
nearly in proportion to the increase in
her canvas. The original boat
put in service this year at Cowes, Eng
land, is only II feet on the water line,
but carries an umbrella sail which meas
ures 80 feet horizontally, and 16 feet up
and down. The sail also serves as an
immense awning. Tie American Ship
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05
THE SHORT MADE TALL.
English Professor Adds Inches to
Stature of Men by a Unique
Process of Stretching.

The attention of the English people
was called to the fact not long ago that
the stature of English soldiers gradu-
ally was decreasing. The house of
lords Immediately appointed a COM
mission to inquire into the facts in the
case, but even the house did not ex-
pect to be able to remedy it If it
should prove to be so.
If some member of the house should
arise and announce there was a great
scarcity of sunshine in the British
isles the house would Immediately ap-
point a commission to inquire into the
matter.
stature proposition the commission did
not expect to accomplish much, for has
not Solomon said that man cannot by.
taking thought add one cubit to his
stature?
However, Solomon was talking with
out reckoning on a certain Prof. At
kinson who was to come after him.
The professor also discovered that the
British soldier was falling off in point
of inches and decided that he should be
stretched and pulled out to the neces-
sary height.
When the Boer war fell upon Eng
land it became fashionable to enlist
and fight and bleed for the country's
sake. Unfortunately for a number of
young fashionables anxious to bleed
they did not come up to the standard
of inches prescribed by the British re-
cruiting officers.
These unfortunate fashionables
could not obtain commissions because
they were not tall enough. That is
where Prof. Atkinson stepped in.
1t is said that 400 cadets passed
through his pulling process and that
$50 feet were added to the English
army by the method. 1t is said that he
charges 500 an inch, and that clients
as rule pay about $500. having five
inches added to their height.
Most of his clients have been cadets
from Sandhurst and Woolwich. Many
of these cadets on entering the acade-
mics, which they do at ages varying
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05
MEDICAL EXAMINER
Of the United States Treasury Recommends
Pe.ru.na
Other Prominent Physicians Use
and Endorse Pe.ru-na.

nR. LLEWELLYN Jordan, Medical
II Examiner of the q. 8. Treasury
Department, graduate of Columbia Col
lege, and who served three years at West
Point, has the following to say of Peruna:
"AiIow me to express my graft
fude to you for the benefit derived
from your wonderful remedy.
One short month has brought
forth q vast change and I now
consider myself a well man after
months of suffering. Fellow suf.
ferers, Peruna will cure you"
A constantly increasing number of
physicians prescribe Peruna in their
practice. It has proven its merits SO
thoroughly that even the doctors have
overcome their prejudice against So
called patentmedicines and recommend
ii to their patients.
Peruna occupies unique position in
medical science. 1t is the only internal
systemic catarrh remedy known to the
medical profession to-day. Catarrh, as
everyone will admit, is the cause of one
half the disease which afi1icts mankind.
Catarrh and catarrhal diseases aff1icx
of the people of United States.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

The chemists of the agricultural de-
partment have shown that ability to
fix the nitrogen, which is infinitely
abundant in the air, and apply it to
the worn-out fields of the world will
enable mankind to cultivate what is
practically virgin soil forever. A plant
at Niagara Falls is taking nitrogen
from the air by eIectrolysis, but not
yet in commercial quantity.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

he wife. II devolves upon you to maxi
her acquainted with the real conditio,
Of her husband. and-and leave order
for his care. II not, Hurry looks aftel
many cases in this part Of"
Ihave not spoken to Mrs Grayson TO
years, but am very sure that DIR. Hurry
the county physician, would not be hel
choice. / will look after the welfare o,
Grayson until the end, whatever il ma,
be-" interrupted Dr. Fairfield. coldly
The young doctor glanced at him in |,
pleased way. His heart was yet callow
and he had not learned the art of with
holding relief from humanity unless
gold was back of it.
When the two had gone, after a close
look at the white face upon the pillow.
Or. Fairfield opened the door of an adj
Joining room where a woman sat with
her hands clasped on the sewing table
In front of her. Turning from contem-
plating the blank wall, she disclosed a
face still beautiful. despite the troubled
Troop at the mouth corner, and the
weary, deep-set eyes.
You have come to tell me that he will
live?" she began. then stopped sudden
ly. The words had come unexpectedly
to her lips
why. don't you want him to live? ."
Her tone had startled the doctor.
would not have brought him home
had l."
Had you not thought earnestly de-
sired it," she interrupted. bitterly. "I
know that have given those who once
respected me. the right to despise me for
condoning sin. by living with II. bur
shrank from facing the world WITH nv
children. and this was my home NOT
his. that should be forced away from If
Then, when the children were gone. |
had my living here. and-it will be
wrench to go away and leave those three
little graves in Elmwood Oh, the world
cannot know a woman's heart"
1t may not, but do, Mary. (" and the
doctor leaned over to take her hands in
his own, for an undertone of the words
startled him to the knowledge that she
was not excusing herself to the world
but to him alone"
Perhaps you never guessed. Mary"
he went on, that when your fathers
farm Joined that of my father. and Won
were beautiful girl. far above the reach
of an awkward country boy, that loved
you. You were my womanly ideal. |
cannot explain ii so that you will under
stand, but when he came, careless and
and carried you away. L
never could quite lose hearing of you.
Mary. my heart has been with you in all
that he has made of life for you. and it
wes with you in tie Shadowy Valley"
but you won distinction. wealth and
4 wife that belonged to the world you
gained by your intellect. Your woman
" ideal chaIged?" She breathed in
surprised way He shook his head. 1T
never changed | married her because
The had your looks, your voice, your
manner. Dear little one. She has been
wing In Elmwood SO long il seems, and
hey think have shut her away in my |
,carf to grieve over forever"
An echo of something hike moan |
cunasd in the next room. The woman's |
ace flushed. and she drew away heI |
Iands With a jerk, 1t is all wrong. /
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05
PARTY LINE TELEPHONE.
A sQuabble Between Subscribers
That Was Settled Very Speed
lily and Amicahly.

Washington has thousands of party line
telephones. The best of feeling does not
always prevail between those on the party
lines when both want to use the phone at
the same time, says the Rochester Democrat
and Chronicle. A prominent politician is
on party line with doctor. He was in
great haste to get friend over the phone
and began ringing and shouting "hello."
The other subscriber wanted to use his tele.
phone at the same time, with the result they
were soon saying harsh things to each other.
Who. are you" demanded the politician.
I'm DR.. Blank, was the answer.
"Oh, pardon me, doctor, you can have
the. line. 1t it weren't for you couldn't
make living"
I'm Jones, the undertaken" was the an
swer.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05
The Mills Of
the Gods D D
BY IDA SHEPLER
Copyright 1908. By Daily Story Pub. Coz

A N OLD-FASHIONED house, on a
~ dingy side street, it's two front
doors opening on the uneven sidewalk;
above one a dressmaking sign swung
out TO the breeze, about the other hung
the strong odor of ether, for within lay
bruised and broken piece of humanity,
over which bent two doctors, one elderly,
the other young and blythe. At table
apart sat a doctor putting away his in
struments used in the work which now
seemed done and ready for the nurse.
This man, goodly of face and form, be-
longed to the early prime of life.
PITY that electric car didn't finish
this poor soul while it was about it,
said the young doctor, glibly. Now he
will suffer dozen deaths and finish up
in the last. tits claimed that Providence
looks after the feet of fools and drunken
men, but ii did not prove out in this case
Why wasn't he taken to the hospital? 2"
Fairfield and were on the car that
hurt him. We reached him just as he
was lapsing into Inconsistencies. He
asked to be taken home to his wife, and
Fairfield would hear to nothing else,"
with nod toward the man at the table.
The hospital was the place for him.
We've worked at a disadvantage here.
1t was little use patching him up out
side when he is broken up to greater ex-
tent inside, but Fairfield would have it
SO. growled the old DOCTOR Then add
ed: He was total wreck before this
happened. Our work is all for naught."
1T is entirely too soon to give a de-
cision in this case. He may live. know
the prognosis is unfavorable, and there
are signs that show nerve wreckage, but
with all this, one can never exactly
guage the reserve force that may prolong
life beyond our farthest guess" The
doctor at the table was adding his deci-
sion. The elder doctor shook his head,
then continued, as he looked around the
room for his hat and gloves:
Il understand. DR.. Fairfield, that you
are friend of the family-or at least of
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05
Fast Gasoline Launches.

Foreign automobile manufacturers are
now interesting themselves in fast gaso-
line boat building. A scheme which the
London Times report characterizes as
matured is for boat propelled through
the water so fast and of shape $50
cleverly devised that instead of cutting
through the water it will skim over it.
this reducing water friction to an abso-
lutte minimum" 1t is believed that IL
will obtain rate of so miles an hour. but
the astonishing pace of 80 miles an hour
may be regarded as certainty.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

women, as find it insures regular and
painless curesleucorrhBa
and ovarian troubles, and builds up the
entire system. l also consider it one Of
the finest catarrh remedies know Of"
M. Z. Gee, M. d.
Catarrh is systemic disease curab BILE
only by systemic treatment. A remedy
that cures catarrh must aim directly at
the depressed nerve centers. This il
what Peruna does.
Peruna Immediately iuvigorates the
nerve-centers which give vitality to the
mucous membranes Then catarrh dis
appears. Then catarrh is permanently
cured.
1T you do not derive prompt and salts
factory results from the use of Peruna
write at once to DIR. Hartman, giving q
full statement of your case, and he will
be pleased to give you his valuable adj
vice gratis.
Address DIR. Hartman, President of
The Hartman Sanitarium, Columbus,
Ohio.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05
DR.. R. Robbins, Muskogee, 1. Z


writes:
"Peruna is the best medicine I know
OF for coughs and to strengthen weak
stomach and to give appetite. Besides
prescribing it for catarrh, I have ordered
It for weak and debilitated people, and
have not had patient but said it helped
him. 1t is an excellent medicine and it
fits so many cases.
~ have large practice, and have q
chance toprescribe your Peruna. Ihope
you may live long to do good to the sick
and the suffering"
DR.. M. G. Gee, writes from SIS Jones
st., San Francisco, CAL:
Peruna has performed so many won
derful cures in San Francisco that 1 am
convinced that it is valuable remedy.
l have frequently advised its use for
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

A note of family pride was struck in the
conversation between three small Reading
boys the other day. The parts played by
were being depicted by two Of the boys in
vivid colors: The career of each, it seemed,
had been halted by confinement in southern
prisons, and it was on the latter fact that the
lads laid particular stress. The third youth,
unable to match these recitals with any
military achievement of his own forefathers,
preserved an envious silence for while, and
then, not to be outdone, said, disparagingIy:
was in Jail along time, and he was never in
the army at all .",Philadelphia Ledger.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

Mrs. Strongmind-Don't you think
woman's hand has played an important
part in the great work of civilization.
Philosopher-Undoubtedly; but I
don't think her hand has been quite 90
effective as her slipper-N Y. Weekly.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

Wife-"There was a man around to-day
selling big brass burglar alarm bells to put
on the front of the house, so iordered one.
Husband-"What! You know we haven't
but it will make the neighbors think we
have. "-Philadelphia Ledger
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05
A Distru.t Of LitcratSre.

You are always more or less skep-
tical about what you see in print
Yes" answered the man who has his
own ideas about things Truth may be
at the bottom of well. But it isn't an
ink well. "-Washington Star.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05
She Knew One.

Mr.. Finnick-In all my life, Miss Egeau.
/ have only met two women whom / would
really care to marry.
Miss Egeau-And-er-wha was the
other ones name, Mr.. Finnick?-Phiadel-
phia Public Ledger
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

gives to Salzer's Oats its heartiest en-
dorsement. Salzer's New National Oats
yielded in 1908 from $50 to 800 bu. per
acre in 30 different States, and you, Mr..
Farmer, can beat this in 1904, il you will.
Salzer's seeds are pedigree seeds, bred up
through careful selection to big yields.
Per Acre.
Salzer's Beardless Barley yielded l2l bu.
Salzer's Home Builder Corn. 300 bu.
Speltz and Macaroni Wheat. 30 hu.
Salzer's Victoria Rape. !..... 10000 lbs.
Salzer's Teosinte, the fodder
wonder .:.......... ...-..... .l6o, 900 lbs.
Salzers Billion Dollar Grass. :. $1,000 lbs.
Salzer's Pedigree Potatoes. 49,. 1000 bu.
Now such yields pay and you can have
them, Mr.. Farmer, in 1904.
SEND 10c IN STAMPS
and this notice to the John A. Salzer Seei'
Co., La Crosse, Wis.,, and you will gel
their big catalog and lots Of farm seed
samples free. TX. IL
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

ASoft Heart.-Fi eddy Boo hoo! Sissy's
dow Mother-"I'm glad to see nv little
Freddy. is so tender-hearted." Freddy
1T isn't that. w-wanted to kilt n
yself."-Pick- Me-Up. =
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

How did you decide SO quickly, that the
a little curiously, OF one of the examining
physicians. "Oh, that was easy" was the
reply. Eve asked him if there was anythins
he wanted to talk over with the president.
and he replied in the negative. "-Syracuss
Hercld
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

It's folly for the leap-year girl to waste her
time on man who doesn' seem to mind his
bachelor freedom.-Chicago Daily News.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

If you want creamery prices do as the
creameries do, use June Tint Butter Color.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

Mrs. Suburba-"There goes Mrs. Tough.
man: Is she in mourning for her late hus-
band! Mrs. Knowit-''No; only wearing
black for him. Cincinnati Times-Star.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

Do not believe Piso's Cure for Consump.
ton has an equal for coughs and colds.-J.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

That man in there is hypocrite," said
jackson, as he left the drug store. "You
mean the druggist" Eyes. When went
in l interrupted him in the midst of COM
pounding prescription; told him wanted
a two-cent stamp and he smiled as sweetiy
as if he was glad to see me. "-Philadelphia
Press
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05
Jusr SEND loo IN srAMpa

Sometimes," said Uncle Eben, "a father
KIND O overburdens boy by 'spectin' him
to be good an smart enough to erect de
faults Of all de res of de fam,ly."-Wash-
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05
Rillion Dollar Grass and Alfalfa.

When we introduced this remarkable
grass three years ago, little did we dream
it would be the most talked of grass in
America, the biggest, quick, hay producer
on earth, but this has come to pass.
Ayr. Editors wrote about it, Ayr. Col
lege Professors lectured about it, Ayr. In
stitute Orators talked about it, while in
the farm house by the quiet fireside, in the
corner grocery, in thesvillage post-office, at
the creamery, at the depot, in fact wher-
ever farmers gathered, Salzer's Billion Dol
lar Grass, that wonderful grass, good for
5 to IA tons per acre, and lots of pasture
besides, is always theme worthy of the
farmers voice.
A. Walford, Westlore Farms, Pa,
writes: 81 have 60 acres in Salzer's Al
falfa Clover. It is immense. I cut three
crops this season and have lots of pasture
besides"
JUST SEND 1oc IN STAMPS
and this notice to John A. Salzer Seed
Co., La Crosse, Wis, for their big catalog
and farm seed samples. IL. IL
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

Every woman feels that she ought to be
the boss.-Mlwaukee Sentinel.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

Robert 3. Roberts, M. D., Wash
ington, D. c., writes:
"Through my own experience
as welt as that of many Of my
friends and acquainfances who
have been cured or relieved Of ca.
farrh by the use of Harfman's
Pernna, ! can confidently recon-
n7cndH to those sufferingfrom such
disorders, and have no hesitation In
prescribing 1t to my patients. 80.
Robert K. Roberts.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

Mr. Subbubs-'I sent a girl to see you
from the employment agency this morning
Did she cally' Mrs. Subbubs-"Y she in.
terviewed me-" Mr. Subbubs-"And will
she take the placey" Mrs. Subbubs-'T hope
so. She was pleased to say she thought !
would be respectful to her."-Philadelph
Press.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

Many, people. are honest as the day is long /;
the night is when they need watching
o. Times Democrat.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

Well begun is half done; but only hal
done is all undone.-Ram's Horn.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

It'e hard to convince the Oldest inhabitan
that the good Gle young. '-''
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

Blows from the bellows of ridicule leave
no bruises Chicago Tribune
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

already arrived. SAe w" ~
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

A blanket mortgage viii not keep house
warm In zero weather.-Chicago Daily News.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

and works off the cold. Laxative Bronze
Quinine Tablets. Price Is cents.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05

One of the laws of gravity is never to
laugh at your own jokes
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1904-03-05
LASTING RELIEF.

was broken, owing to irregular action
of the kidneys. l was suffering intense
~ from severe pains in the small of my
back and through the kidneys and an
noyed by painful passages of abnormal
secretions. No amount of doctoring
relieved this condition. began taking
Doan's Kidney Pills and experienced
quick and lasting relief. Doan's Kid
ney Pills will prove a blessing to all
sufferers from kidney disorders who
will give them fair trial"
Foster ilburn Co., Buffalo, N. T.,
proprietors. For sale by all druggists,
price 50 cents per box.