The Birmingham age-herald., 1904-06-21

| aH g their footsteps to the country it
 would not be amiss to offer a few words of advice. In the first place male bovines are known to have a strange antipathy for city people and therefore 1t Is advisable to give all animals of this persuasion wide berth. It is not deemed wise to try to rob a wasps, nest and bees all have a business end Also. when eating bread and honey do not en- deavor to create a favorable impression on the hostess by remarking airily, "Oh. see you keep bee," as was done by a young lady whose exploits were recently recounted. Although you may be great ly interested in the operation content yourself with merely watching the farm hand do the milking and do not try to do 1t yourself. It Is not as easy as 1t looks. no trip to the country is considered a suc- cess unless you get good tan. This can be acquired by sitting in the sun with your Panama off and running the risk of sunstroke. Of course you must fish but you need not catch anything unless you want to. and you must get caught in the rain as many times as possible. Nothing convinces a person that he is in the country more quickly than to be out in a downpour of rain and have to walk i've miles to the house in mud that varies in depth from three to six inches Above all, do not try to make country people think you know anything about the coun- try when you don't.
 Now Chicago meat king Is trying to buy a title that will give him the en- tree to courts of old world kings who , are kings by chance and therefore real kings. This gentleman from the city of smoke and much noise, vufgarfy term- ed the Windy City, is no worse than a great many of his compeers in wealth who have a sneaking notion that they would like to have a handle to their names somewhat more impressive than mere Mister" In fact the tendency of American wealth to seek foreign titles has been remarked upon more than one occasion, but heretofore the actual busi- ness of trading in titles seems to have been confined largely to heiresses. There fore it is somewhat startling when a meat king lets it be known that he wants to be noble in his own name. Having much or this worlds goods, there is no reason why the Chicago millionaire should not obtain his desire, but before donning his coronet he would do well to brush up In grammar and dispense with loud jew elry, if he is one of those meat kings that have figured prominently in humor- ous publications
 Nothing Is more admirable in the his tory of the stage than Mary Anderson Navarro's devotion to her home. In ex- blaming her reasons for refusing an offer of $2O0Oo0 to deliver readings in the Uni ted States she says, Why venture once more into the glare of the footlights? My life lacks nothing. It Is one endless dream of peace. I have all that I could want or wish for The glory of a woman is in her husband, her home, her children. In one word, I have learned the lesson of content" No wonder the woman of such sentiment was adored on the stage and was the idol of thousands
 It Is strange what an attraction brass buttons have for the average woman. Even the niclsle buttons of conductors and policemen are potent, but brass but tons easily take first rank in the af;ec-