Palestine daily herald. [volume] (Palestine, Tex.) 1902-1949, 1904-01-30
A LAY SERMON.
BY HAMILTON HAMILTON.

tanned in that Impressive little
ballad entitled " Papa's Pants
Will Soon Fit Willie" but when /
hear of case of Willie's pants,
thrown aside Us unfit by the
naughty Willie, being adopted by
papa, somehow always think il
is time to hang out the crepe
and write the old mans obituary.
1t is, perhaps, the natural philos-
ophy of things that Willie should
fall heir to some of papa's pants,
but that papa should wear any of
Willie's OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES. 1t is
the wrong end of evolution put
first. and indicates that papa has
been to bat and struck out, and
has changed from the illustrious
head of his household to the tail
end of the home sweet home
chorus, and to Willie has become
simply the "old man."
1t is critical time in the life of
man when he elects to wear
Wiilie's pants. In fact, beloved,
there is too much of tendency
on the part of married men to go
to seed after they enter the con-
nubial state. Men, who before
they "hit the lottery were
scrupulously neat in their dress
oftentimeS as the connubial wears
down to a steady diet, begin to
neglect their personal appearance,
and by and by they go home in
the shadow of the evening with
their faces looking like a worn
out scrub brush, their linen fieck-
ed with the soil of the business
mart, and expect the wife of their
bosom to grab them and cry, come
to my arms, my brown eyed boyl
1t is too much to expect of her;
she simply cannot do it with
good grace.
A great many men interpret
their bible in this wise: Six days
shalt thou labor and do all thy
work. Six days shalt thou go
unshaved, let thy boots rust, and
LET not thy clothes feel the hair of
brush. But on the seventh day
Mhoon EN- ~ 'ress up Va n
fhiserable. There Is suS: ( IA az
as OVERRIDING Sunday Observance
in this respect. 1t is really not
much trouble to keep up appear
ances. All you have to do is to
steer clear of any of Willie's
pants, shave three times a week,
shine your shoes now and then,
patronizc the laundryman, and
keep brushed up a little. Mind
you. | am not asking you to wear
a monocule, a silk hat and a
prince albert. but simply asking
you to keep your rags" in a
semblance of good order, and
keep down the whiskers. To be
brief, and sum up the whole mat
ter, give your personal appear
ance the same attention you did
before you married.
Another phase of this question
is to he considered: When YOU
take to the Willie's pants habit
you are sure to lose prestige in
your own household. 1t confess
es that you have disobeyed that
immortal command and given up
the ship, and are ready to give up
the gun. Don't do it. A man is
never dead until the hearse backs
up for him, and | don't believe a
man should say he is dead one
as long rs he can wiggle a finger
or bat an eye.
So / say, beloved, don't you
ever touch Willie's pants, but
wear you own pants and look |
your best, so that when you come
home to the bosom of your fami-
Iy they will cry aloud joyfuIly |
with one voice and say, there
comes the main squeeze of this
push. And if your wife happens
to have company she can intro
duce YOU Is her husband, and not /
try and pass you off as the hired
man. Amen.