The Savannah morning news., 1904-01-03
WORLD

gowns. F''0 VI spolieu
Few mothers have this comnreban-
sion OF their daughters. They roiob+
syLipalhlze about ruined dress for
cIOtnes are a common level on which
all women meet, but when If cnr,as
10 little things in which tbe rootheS
mas no personal interest the girI U,bo
expects sympathy of her mother gen
efally asks for bread and is given n
stoIe. In the majority of cases a
Iiiotier sympathy narrows down to
purely personal tastes, and when vo,,
hear woman lamenting thar bor
mary Is queer" or her SalIie snch
disappointment" ninety-nine times
OUT OF a hundred it is merely case
OF Mary or Sallie wanting to do sone-
thlhg that her mother never wanted
TO 90. If the mother was haa,,tI,
ana belle in her youth, fond Of danc,
tng ana gayety, and flirting, she is
luu OF sympathy for her daughter If
sue, 100 is fond of society. If how
ISVei, on the other hand, her daughter
Is intellectual or pious. and caras
nothing for the gay world how, Ii..IS
Goes her mother enter into her tbona,1ts
anu aspirations; or you NAV raverse
Inns ana you still find il trua Tbo
frivolous daughter of a serious roo+han
SIPS away with some CAV ntatror -
dahces and parties, just as the serious
daughter of the worldly mother turns
10 some other woman for svmna INV,
ana encouragement in her desire ~
PuISue career, or do some real good
~ ~. tIe World. And yet mothers lament
tnat their daughters do NOT confde
In them! The wonder would he 10 49,,
did. "'"'" NC IL Qhey
Another bar between mother and
daughters is that the mother So often
dl!oWs herself to be nothing but the
crlllc on the hearth, and keeps herself
81 d sterhly disappearing attitude that
lrlghtens away every confidence 90
completely as a scarecrow does tirnid
oiluS' II there ever was a time when
she was silly and giggling She
mas forgotten it. If there eyer
was time when she thought
IL triumph to adorn herself
IN seventeen secret fraternity pins-
ana wear college colors, and consider
ed 1t madly fascinating to have cal
low youths write their names on her
Fan, she ignores it, when was
young" she tells her daughter girls
ana young men sat up with the width
Oh the parlor between them. and CON
Versed in elevated tones about the
uplifting effects of poetry and diIated
upon shakespeare and the musical
slasses' while as for permitting any
familiarity, she was, according to her
account the original human icicle, and
would nave died before she would SO
hand. -'et
Now the girl is miserably con-
scious that she and her friends fall
far below that exalted standard. and
she Knows her mother despises them
accordingly, and she protects herself
as best she may by silence and by
keeping her chums, male and female.
out OF her mothers sight. It's no
wonder that the girl who knows her
mother is going to criticise her con-
Versation let's her hear as little of il
as possible. It's no wonder that the
girl who knows her mother is going
to ridicule her friends, meets them
elsewhere than in her own home. It's
no wonder that the girl who knows
her mother is going to be shocked at
every little thing, and see harm in
acts that the present conventions of
society-which, after all, decide the
propriety of many things-consider
harmless, hides her little escapades,
that some times develop into serious
misdemeanors Just for want of a gem
tie restraining hand. It's the mother
with the chronic don't" habit who
drives her daughters into actual
Wrong-doing.
A potent cause of friction between
mothers and daughters, and one that
is largely responsible for driving girls
into matrimony inconsiderately, and
that makes them yearn for careers,
is the inability of mothers to realize
that their daughters are grown and
have the rights of grown people.
There is, apparently, no other thing
so impossible as for parents to see
that their adult children resent be-
ing treated like babies This is
particularly true as regards mothers.
Some times a father rises 10 the
height of granting his son liberty to
do as he pleases, but as long as a
girl remains at home her mother con-
siders she has a perfect right to die
tate to her about her clothes what
she shall eat, and think, and believe,
and how she shall breathe. I have
known old maids of forty-f1ve who
have never been permitted to even
pick out a pocket handkerchief for
themselves. and I once heard a bride
calculate the day after she was mar
ried, Thank God, I'll never have to
wear another pink dress"-a uni
form she had worn consistently ever
since she was a baby because her
mother happened to admire pink.
Mothers make another mistake in
barring their daughters from all par
ticipation in the housekeeping. 1t is
said that no house is big enough for
two women, and the pity of this is
that it is true of mothers and daugh-
tiers. Few women will let their
daughters have any authority in run
ming the home. If the girl wants to
introduce any new ways of doing
things, the mother objects to it. If
the girl tries to cook new dishes, the
mother is either so afraid she will
spoil good material, or is so fond of
bossing she won't give her a free hand,
and after little the girl sees the
impossibility of doing ANYTHING and
gives up the attempt. The evil of
this is threefold. The mother has
deprived herself of a helper, she has
closed the door of a legitimate in
terest to her daughter, and she keeps
the girl from learning the rudiments
Of the profession of housewifery that
is to be her life occupation when she
gets married. IF mothers would only
take their daughters into partnership
with them in the home, 1t would do
more to settle the question of what to
do with the idle. restless, dissatisfied
girls who are imagining themselves
embryo geniuses than anything else.