The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1904-04-24
* s
II

,,de on christmas eve and that the par
son wasn't going home before the holt
days. SO we sent bug Rey TO per.
siiadd hin.
rho dancing was the critical point. but
the Bug told him that II he was going
To ,reaci, to tho farmers he ought 10
n,eot them In their hours Of rosrcntion.
The parson said that he was no, opnos-
led to dancing III general, though ho
didn't think 1t scemly for the clergy.
and as II appeared to be Innocent ard
,espectablc, he promised TO attend the
tcntertainmcnt.
we got there n little late things we're
Going full blast. After a preliminary
.cout we put the Parson ZIP against
Nell Hawkins and left him spelling 10
her. Right here was where the Steering
Committee got In It's keen work we
butted In and made ourselves agreeable.
Wc peeled Oft our naughty air and mix
cd Our team work was perfect Each
one OF us had nailed n man in Nell's
string and edged him off, interfering to
give tho Pnrson q chance. | had the rcd
seen my dutY and dono 1t. We got real
secn my duty, md done It. We got real
friendly, durn him! BY and by ran
shin Off with the Bug TO lave drink,
while went back to take a look
Say the 1'arson was all right. He had
that girl hypnotized He was sitting on
the bench beside her manufacturing SCI
rious rhetoric. and she vas lamping HIN
ns though he were the only one within
two hundred and ten miles. She had
sat ont two dances with him. n the
Parson can preach the way he can con-,
he'll be u regular Henry Ward Beechec.
1 Judged that the time had come for the
event of the evening, and signalcd out
OF the window for the Bug TO trot in
the victim. f
You couldn't gucss what that budding
preacher was doing before they got back!
Well, there was q bunch of mistletoe
in sort OF entry outside the hall. The
rustIcs had been doing their uncouth
Eambols under 1t all the evening. Nell
sided outside pretending that she wanted
air and stood there looking inviting
Honest didn't think that the Parson
would kiss her, but she was a sure
enough temptation for any man. She
WAS Il beaut.
Now you stop!" she says, and just
then tho farmer got into the field OF
vision.
WOI IEpSttL thS y aP So'AiAhSiiss '''S
it vas not pretty. The Parson stood off
and looked meek. Nell gggled.
you little runt.' says the farmer, II
won't bother TO smash you, but I'm go
Ing to Just naturally shake the innards
out of YOU"
/ could sec the Parsons back begin to
come up. knew he was wrestling with
temptation but all he said was, YOU'D
better not touch me. sir! $
The farmer smiled and ducked his
head as though he were making low
tackle and bumped into the Parson,
caught him low by the waist arounu both
arms. Then he proceeded to shake him.
the way terrier shakes rat. He was
twice as big and strong as our man, and
began to have me serious doots. The
Parson had no chance to exhibit his
nerve aud science in that style Of fgit-
ing. But it did one good thing, though
1t got him blazing, foaming mad.
The farmer finished his shake and then
started to let go-and then. Lord love
us you would have cried with JOY to see
the fireworks. Parson put the heel OF
his fist Into the yaps chin and broke
that cinch hold to flinders. Tho next
thing that happened, our red-headed
friend went up In the air and down like
a rocket, with me yelling my head loose
in corner. The farmer got up like a
rubber ball though, and rushed after
Parson, and that was what we wanted.
Our man stood off and shot 'em in.
heavy and hard, one swipe after another.
But the farmer was game, and a glutton
for punishment. He was in love and
the girl was watching, chewing her hand
kerchief to bits.
The farmer stood for it till he saw
about sixteen Parsons, and then we
pried 'em apart. You ought to have
viewed the remains!
What d'you think Nell Hawkins did?
In the classic annals of the Eternal
Feminine, she's always supposed to tag
the victor and elope with the Might
makes Right proposition, but instead,
Nell jumped for the loser.
60 George! are you hurt?" she says.
and she went to crying over him until
her sleepy old father woke up. and came
out to the dressing room to investigate.
It was intruding upon family party to
stay. so we pulled out from motives Of
deiicacy and desire to celebrate.
The Parson didn't say anything for Il
long time. After while he put his hand