Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1904-05-06
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!: CHIPS AND RAGS
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By LUE +. VERNON.

Strange that the railroad companies
have so many rails and build so few
fences.
Times are dull in many towns al
present, rent high, money scarce and
children plenty.
Most women hate to see a man
make fool Of himself-especially il
it is about another woman.
We have Eagles, Lions and Hawks
might hawks-but we do not believe
the latter have yet organized as a
lodge.
The devil" in print-shop thinks
year is long time in learning to
make paste, wet down the paper, and
sweep out the office.
Doesn't it make you think of days
gone by to hear two little tots, swing
ing on the gate, singing in their child
ish way "The Brides Ball"
What has become OF the old-fash-
ioned mother who used to dope the
kids in spring-time with sassafras tea,
cream of tartar and sulphur?
There's talk OF making the Chicago
churches fre-proof. AS though a
church could be anything but proof
against ire-some kinds of fire, any
way.
"On account of newspaper attacks,
Justice Cam, of Seattle, has resigned.
aberdeen Herald.
Well, the newspapers can stand it
if the Justice Cam.
The man who allows his nose to be
kept on the grind-stone is responsible
for the woman who has a diamond in
her tooth, and wears rings on her
thumbs.
The most wonderful thing about a
baby is his ability to refrain from
blushing when his mother, in his
presence, describes his good points to
her visitors.
Senator Bailey, of Texas, says that
civil service "is a dream-an irrides.
cent dream" 1t is also a nightmare,
a delusion, fraud, and a hypocritical
political sham.
Hundreds of men reach the summit
OF success in business, and thousands
Of men get neck deep in mud in the
foothills, ON the road to the summit.
And there you are.
The professor 10 Alabama who
whitfield his finger, trying to sharpen
it, thinking it was his lead pencil,
should be awarded the medal for
Observation-Disclosures.
Doesn't it seem ridiculous to speak
of the trainer Of athletes as "coach"2
One might carry the idea little fur
ther, and speak Of the kindergarten
teacher as baby.carriage.
Observation-Disclosures. No, the
foregoing is not printers pie. 1t is
the cognomen Of Russian admiral
who came in contact with the Japan.
ese yellow jackets off Korea recently.
With Piles, Coon and Lord, hop.
ping around in the political arena oil
this State, it is as plain as the nose on
your face, that politics is dsbbled in,
from low to high degree. Isn't it
so?
Quite a number Of papers are run.
ming Twenty years ago." Forty
years ago" reprint matter. It's jus,
as we'll, perhaps. Its relief from
reading" boiler plate" and Sarsaparilla
matter.
OF course the average office-hnnter
and candidate for anything, is flirting
with the labor vote. even if he doesn't
honestly believe in the labor princi-
pies. The political office-hunter and
the candidate is very foxy.
The Russian Government has given
notice that newspaper correspondents
using wireless telegraph will be treated
as spies and shot,"
Well, few yellow journal CORE
spondents would not be missed.
One day Japan has couple of hun
dred thousand men in the field, ther
Russia sees her and goes a hundred
Thousand better. 1t is thus each day
Pretty soon there won't be any mer
left to send war news, by either natior
1t has been ascertained that the
knife used by Joaquin Miguel Aratos
who attempted the life of Premier
Maurier at Barcelona, was not poisoned
The discovery OF the astonishing fac
ought to tickle the premier into hys
terics.
In the original story Of the tempta
ton, it was the man who laid tn,
blame upon woman. And in thes,
up-to date times, when anything goe
wrong with a great number of men
they still lay all the blame to the wo
man, as originally defined.
There will be "breezy time
among some of Washington's poll
ticians this spring. Some OF our loca
leaders will become involved, if the,
aren't now, and will have their "pep
per.boxes" loaded to the muzzle, an,
OF course, the sore places will smart
Letter fly"