The San Francisco call., 1904-12-07

stand, although she had been taught
by bitter experience that he would not
allow moral scruple to stand between
him and the attainment of his de-
sire, which in this case was her in
generation, for reasons we'll known
to her, but which she would keep to
herself with a view of averting scan
dal
That's not true. Judge" said Mr..
McKinnon, a middle-aged artisan
with careworn countenance. Il don't
want to have her sent to Jail, but 1
would like to have her compelled to
swear that she will stop drinking.
When sober she's a good wife and
mother"
I'VE can fix that right here" said
his Honor Cabaniss, provided the
lady prefers voluntary abstinence in
freedom to enforced sobriety in
prison. If it is true, as she states,
that the drink habit has not hopeless
ly enslaved her. she can file no rea-
sonable objection to making oath that
she will abjure the use of intoxicants
for a given period
Mrs. McKinnon promptly accepted
the semi-challenge and Clerk Barney
Conlan was instructed to administer
the oath. With due solemnity he re-
quested her to hold UP her right hand
and repeat the pledge he was about to
dictate. She obeyed his instruction
most tractably until he said ''for a
period of one calendar year from this
date when her hand suddenly de-
scended and she sharply demanded
what he meant by that.
ITO swear you off for a year." the
clerk explained
Not muchv vociferated the lady.
What do you take me for? Why
don't you try to make it a century?
The i-dee-ah!"
With folded arms she stood and
turned deaf ear to both suasion and
intimidation from Judge, clerk and
husband. She would rather spend
the remainder of her earthly tenure
behind prison bars, she asserted, than
accede to the proposed unnecessarily
protracted deprivation of malt or
spurious liquor Not that she be-
lieved herself incapable of living up
TO such a covenant-no. indeed-but
she would never submit to have her
good nature so grossly imposed upon.
Then the Judge, by way Of compro-
mise, suggested that the term be re-
duced to six months. but the sugges-
ton was waved aside with a derisive
hand.
Don't you think" she asked, that
If worried through three months
without taking a drink 1 would be
pretty we'll weaned?"
So three months was the period
agreed on, and the lady qualified her
acquiescence by informing the court
that she wouldn't swear off for one
minute If she hadn't become tired Of
the proceedings.
Don't 'urt me character. yer wa
shup," said Henry Mathieson, steward
of the British ship Linton, when Judge
Mogan asked him what he meant by
displaying a large revolver in a Bar
barry Coast dance-hall and thus Great
ing great agitation among the femi-
nine habitues thereof. ''Wot I means
by that ere remark, SIR" he continued,
is that 'ates T. be jugged, cause
never ave bin scragged-in fac, this
ere is my first happearance before a
beak. This ere bobby can tell yer
washup that 1 hoffered no resistance
wen he nailed me. Please don't 'urt
me character, sir!"
What did you carry a deadly wea-
pom for-to kill somebody" the bench
inquired.
BLESS yer art. no. sir. Me MATES
tinted that 1t would be a wise pre-
caution to harm meself afore going
ashore, cause there was lots O. Ugh
waymen halong tn docks. 1 didn't
hintend t arm nobuddy, yer washup
4 an Ye can Idlke Iilc WOIQ Luz IL.
His word was taken.
Manager Ed Ackerman Of the Cali
fornia Theater told Judge Conlan that
the newspaper photographer who was
battered By Comedian Charles Dox OF
"The Runaways" company had OBJ
tanned his (Mr. A.'s) permission to &C
behind the scenes and investigate the
reported attempted suicide of Miss
Daisy Dale, soubrette. Prior to the
! photographers arrival, Mr.. Ackermar
added, a physician had examined Miss
Dale and declared her swoon was not
genuine.
What's that?" inquired the Judge
THE doctor said she was shamming,
replied the manager.
'Ho hol" Quoth the Judge, that
puts a new aspect on the case, and
must continue it for further investiga-
ton. Wen have Miss Dale here, also
the physician who opined she was
shamming, and then we may be better
able to decide whether 1t is justifiable
for an actor to assault a newspaper
l. -