The Kootenai herald. [volume] (Kootenai, Idaho) 1891-1904, 1904-01-08
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Her first proposal: Madge-Was
she glad when he told her the old, old
story? Marjorie-You bet she was.
Why, that girl never heard it before.
Puck.
He-Suppose we found mutual adj
miration society. l will begin by say
ing l admire your beautiful eyes. Now,
what do you admire in me- She-I
admire your taste.
Department-store courtesies: Floor
walker-Ah good-day, madam. Call
again. Mrs. Outertown-I will, thank
We. An you-uns must come ter see /
us!-Chicago News.
Going to extremes: Snaso-This SOU
venir habit is getting to be something
fierce. Rodd-I should say so. l know
of man who visited friend and took
his friends wife as a souvenir.-Life.
Niece-Now, Uncle Ned, isn't he just
the sweetest little cherub in the world =?
Uncle-Well, Lucy, 1 don't know much
about cherubs, but as a specimen of a
plain human baby he is certainly a
bowling success!
Patron suppose the leading lady
is very happy after getting all those
bouquets. Usher-Oh, no. She only
got FIVE Patron-Gracious! isn't that
enough? Usher-No; she paid for six,
l believe.-Philadelph Press.
Within the limit: Jones-I wish you
would figure on a new house for me.
Notwithstanding about five thou
sand dollars? Jones-No; something
about five hundred. I've only got five
thousand TO spend on lt.-Judge.
Teacher-Now, then, Tommy, you
have no good excuse for staying away
from school yesterday Tommy
Well it amt my fault Teacher-It
isn't2 Why? Tommy-'Cause done
my best to think up a good one
Not what she expected: Lady (of
uncertain age)-I have put your seat
next to mine, Mr.. R&wlingson / hope
you do not mind? Mr.. Rawlingson-
Mind, my dear lady; you know how lit
tie it takes to satisfy me-Tit-Bits.
Definite: Mr. Newly-wed lin the
[ kitchen)-What are you cooking there,
my dear? Mrs. Newly-wed (excitedly)
Don't bother me now. There's the
8 cook book. I'm making recipe No. 1871
> on page 396-W oman's Home COmpan-
ion.
Bobby say. MIR -Updyke, what do
you suppose Clara said about you just
before you came in? Mr.. Updyke-I
haven't an idea in the world, Robert
Bobby (amazed)-Well, you've guessed
, it! That's just what she did say!-Tit-
Bits.
His Thanksgiving dinner: 81 am
very sorry. Victor to think you were
such a glutton. Are you not sorry your
self that you ate so much turkeyY
Yes, mother, cause l hadn't any Other
room left for the mnce pie."-Harper'
Bazaar
We'll Tommy, how are you gettini
ON at schoolY' First rate. l ain
dong so well as some of the other boys
; though | can stand on my head; but
, have to put my feet against the wall
l want to do it without the wall at all!
, Punch.
Hoogley-When l entered your yar(
l last evening your dog barked at me
t Wilby-You could hardly expect me t.
{ keep servants and let them fill in thei
time barking at folks, and I'm to,
busy myself to attend to it.-Bostol
Transcript.
10
: at that woman ON the other side of tn
d street waving her hands about he
y head Is she practicing physical cul
!. ture? She-Mercy no! She's descrit
I ing her new hat to another woman
e Chicago News.
d although l have granted you thi
! interview" said the pompous ney
i office holder. Il don't want people t
think I'm in the habit of talking 70
publication" "They won't" replied tn
f reporter, "when they see these remark
u in print"-Philadelp Ledger
l. 81 seen you kissin' Name" said he
b little brother. We'll here" said tn
:. dear girls accepted lover, "if l Civ
Y you a dime can l trust you to say notl
7 ing about it?" "Surei 1 never peache
- on any of the other fellows when the
4 gave me money. Ledge
n "What did you do with that fello'
). who stole the horse" asked the tel
!. derfoot "NOthin' much" answere
- Broncho Bill-"jist took the boss ava
from him" as that all?" Yep. Il
C war settin' in the saddleawith a roI
g around his neck tied to tree when W