Arizona republican., 1904-01-13
THEY WANT TO RIDE FREE
Odd Excuses Given by Applicants Who
Railroad Transportation.

Odd Excuses Given by Applicants VIII
Railroad Transportation.
IF all the ingenuity, adriotness anC
sheer nerve that are utilized every yea,
by persons scheming to extract passe:
from railroad companies could be as
sembled and directed toward the
achievement of some one great OBJ
ject-the devising, let us say. of /
practicable flying machine-I can't sey
how such purpose could possibly fai
of accomplishment" said a well-knowr
railroad official. THE mad desire tC
get something for nothing which Is
prevalent in the world today, is no.
where capable of more striking exem-
plification than in the letter files of 9
railroad passenger agent"
Several months ago a Baltimore cit
izen. perfectly well able to pay rail
road to whatever point he wished &c
go and possessing no possible claim
upon a railroad for free transportation
applied by letter to Baltimore passen-
ger agent for a pass to New York and
return. The reason he advanced why
he should be furnished with the trans
portation to and from New York was
palpably so fiimsy that his request was
firmly, yet politely, turned down by
return mail
A week or so later he sent another
request for the transportation to. and
from New York, presenting this time
little better reason for granting OF
the request by the passenger agent
But the reason wasn't quite good
enough, and the request was again re-
fused. Three days later the mans re
quest for pass to New York and back
was granted. He had facts, figures an
references all of which were verified,
all of which made it out of the ques-
ton to refuse him again. The compli
mentary pass to New York and return
was accordingly sent to him.
1t came back to the passenger agent
by return mail. Accompanying it was
this gloating note:
We'll, got it. didn't /? just want
ed to see if 1 could, that's all, and l
win. L don't want TO go to New York
and so l return the pass"
Not long ago a man in a southern
city tackled passenger agent for
Transportation to Philadelphia and re =
turn. The passenger agent had never
seen or heard tell of the man before.
so it was no mere motive of cur
iosity that prompted him to inquire of
the fellow upon what ground he was
applying for free transportation.
We'll" replied the man who wanted
to ride free, I've got a dog that's a
walking ad for your line O. cars"
Have. hey?" said the passenger
agent, willing to examine the works"
of new scheme for the manipulation
of the free pass dodge. Let's have a
look at your dog. How does he ad-
vertise the road"
The man went to the door and whis-
tied, and presently there came stink
ing into the passenger agents office a
common, under-fed looking mutt
The dog proved. however, to be quite
for a hopeless looking cur
The man VINO desired the railroad
to ride him for nothing had a hastily
devised blackboard about two feet long
under his arm. On the writing side of
the blackboard he scrawled to the
right in big printed characters with
piece of chalk the initials of the rail-
road over which he was trying to get
the free transportation. The left OF
the blackboard he scrubbed the initials
of the name of the competing railroad
out OF the town.
NOW. Towze." said the man who
wanted ride gratis What's the best
railroad to ride on to Philadelphi ~
The poor mutt raised a weary right
paw and pointed to the right side of
the right side of the blackboard and
barked feebly.
Sec" said the man triumphlntlv.
Great scheme for your road isn't Il?
You give me the pass to Phillie and
back and I'll stand over in front of the
depot of your ival road AMI work thi !;
blackboard trick for w1D.u day
Look how it would build up your
local business,
Then the passenger agent gently
but determinedly nudged the man
with the unique advertising dog to-
ward the door, and the man went down
the street with the most absurd ex-
preston Imaginable.
Once in a great while, however, the
free-ride applicant has a joke on the
passenger agent. At meeting of the
passenger agents not long ago one Of
them told one on himself He had
been elevated from a position of sup
of a passenger division
for an eastern railroad to that of as
sistant general passenger agent of a
line in the middle west. He had never
met any of the officials of the road that
gave him the lift in position. On the
day after he took hold of his
new job a countrified old man with
Oulgy store clothes and a considerable
suit of tangled white Galways clomped
INTO his Office and said:
Young man viii you be good enough
to fix me out with ridn' from here to
Omaha an back"
The new assistant general passenger
agent looked the queer looking old
nan over amusedly.
Perhaps first gran'pa," he said.
you'd better tell me what makes you
think you're entitled to "ridin" from
lere to Omaha and back on this line
If cars?"
"Oh nothin' 'ceptin' that I'm the pres
dent of the road" replied the coun-
-rified looking old man with a broad
Star.
When woman reads a historical
novel she skins the history mart