The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1904-11-12
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papav' Il thought you said your faith.
err was in Californian" HE is."-
Houston Post
First Doctor-Then we decide not to
operate. Second Doctor-Yes. What
do you think we ought to charge him
for deciding not to operate?-Brooklyn
Life.
LADY, have nothing to give you,
my poor man, but some cold sausages.
Knight of the Road-'Scuse me, mum,
but don't your sign say. Beware OF
the DogY
Clarinda-You can't keep dog in
your new fat? Florinda-No, we had
to give Fido away; but Frederick had
bis dear little bark put in our phono-
graph. - Cincinnati Commercial Trib-
une.
A teacher was explaining to a little
girl how the trees developed their
foliage in the springtime "Oh, yes"
said the little miss, II understand; they
keep their summer clothes In their
trunks"
Doctor" queried the inquisitive per-
son, do You believe that the cigarette
habit causes weak minds?" mot nee
essarily," replied the NJ. D.; ''as rule
1t merely indicates them."-Chicago
Daily News.
whats that racket down thereY'
shouted the old gentleman from the
head Of the stairs. II think" promptly
replied his up-to-date daughter, "that
It was Bob dropping his voice when
he proposed to me-"
Macintosh boasts a good deal about
his family. doesn't heT" Yes, think
he claims that the head of his family
was the original Macintosh that Noah
had with him during that rainy sea-
son" -Philadelphia Press.
Bridget-Why, Master Tommy, what
ever is the matter7 Tommy-I'vs hurt
my Inland In the h-hot water. Bridget
-Shure, thin, 1t serves you right. You
should have felt the water before you
put your hand in!-Punch.
"What is lover" asked the sweet girl
who was looking for a chance to leap,
Love-" replied the old bachelor, rs
kind of insanity that makes a man
call two hundred pound female his
little turtle dove."-Chicago News.
Mrs. Muggins-Sly husband is per
feet crank. Mrs. Buggins-All hus
bands are, my dear. Mrs. Muggins-
But fancy man who complains thai
my mustard plasters are not as strong
as those his mother used to makel
Maud-See this ring7 Archie CAV,
1t to me the other evening. Irene
thought 1 recognized it. You'll fine
1t has a rough place just under the
setting that will make your finger
sore.-Cincinnad Commercial Tribune
A junior student Cornell Univer
sity, In rendering an account to hi
father of his last terms expenses, en-
tered as an item: Charity, thirty dol
lars" His father wrote back: Il fea
that charity covers a multitude o
SINS"
do you think they'll be happy nov
, they're married?" well, I don't Sc
why not. They eat the same kind o
breakfast food. take the same bran'
OF dyspepsia tablets, and wear tn
same make of hygienic underwear.
Town Topics.
81 suppose, Senator" she said, "tha
} you try to keep in touch with the finar
l cial interests of the country" IF
didn't, my dear girl, I'd have to Gu
down my Twin expenses or practic
law a good deal harder than l do b'
tween sessions.
A Little Rusty: 1.-The bride SCENE
; quite nervous. didn't she?" remarke
, the first Chicago girl. Naturally" r,
, piled the other; 'she's somewhat OF
of practice. It's the first time she
been married since last year."-Phil,
delphia Public Ledger.
Visitor-What a racket the steaI
, makes clanking through the pipesl Els
Dweller (shivering)-Yes. 1t remind
, me of one of Shakspeare's plays. VII
i itor - Which-"The Tempest?" Els
DweIler-No. Much Ado About Notl
: ing."-Town and Country.
A teacher in an East Side school
trying to explain the meaning Of til
word Slowly" illustrated it by wall
ing across the floor. When he aske
the class to tell him how he walke'
/ a boy at the foot of the class shoute'
"Bow-legged, sir. "-Lippincott's
''I lost my foot In the war;" said I'll
tramp, land I'm trying to raise enoug
Il money to get out to California" "Wh,
h do you want to go to California for
d asked the woman at the door. 90
J. I've heard that there are things whic
I grow foot in day out there. "-Yoi
= kers Statesman.
!. Friend OF the Family want
$ give your husband birthday presen
: What do you think would please hi
: most2 Mrs. Kutely-Oh, a stickpi
I He says he never has enough of theT
{ Friend-what is his favorite ston,
: Mrs. Kutely-The emerald. Hangir
' up the 'phone) Isn't that lovely; II
/ always wanted an emerald pin.-D
I. troit Free Press.
Scene: Editors sanctum. Print
crushing In excitedly)-Here's G
Johnson. the murderer. has just bee
: found innocent, and the governme
! has teleo1aphcd a pardon We've q