davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
Corrected Diagnosis.

A Starke County physician tells this story on himself: After writing a pre- scription for patient, the physician told him that the druggist would prob- ably charge him GO cents for filling 1t. Then the patient asked the physi- clan to lend him the GO cents. There upon the physician carefully scratched out part of the prescription and hand ed 1t back with 10 cents, remarking: "You can get that filled for a dime. What scratched out was for your nerves, but you need nothing for them."- News.
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
CHINAMEN UNDER WAY.
Mexican's Clever Way of Smuggling
 Them Into the Stat.l


 Them Into the Stat.5.
 One day a patrol in the vicinity of the border town of Tia Juana, Cal, mo- ticed wagon with heaving load of hay across the imaginary line which separates the two republics. This was not exactly an unusual proceeding, but the riders suspicious were aroused, nevertheless Railing the driver, he asked him his destination. As the reply was somewhat hay, the scout informed the Mexican that he would accompany him.
 The fellow looked the picture of mis- cry when he told the patrolman that he really did not need an escort, so the latter told him that the man to whom the hay was to be delivered really did not need the provender. "You had better dump it out right here on the desert," continued the officer, "and, mind you, do not stick Chinese with pitchfork while you are doing it." The Mexican was voluble in his excuses and gestures, but nevertheless he had to toss the hay out upon the hot sands. He had all the load off, with the exception of layer about a foot deep, and then he trampled around on that, otlcking the pitchfork in at in- tervals of every foot until the steel prongs ran into the bed of the wagon. He turned to the inspector in triumph, as if to assure him that no cooolie could live through such an assault. Just to be arbitrary, the latter com manded the driver to throw all of the load off. The Mexican reluctantly obeyed, and then the rider noticed that the bed of the wagon was un- usually high. A closer inspection showed him that there was false bot tom in the vehicle. He covered the Mexican driver, who was preparing to run for it, with his gun.
 When he had him securely hand. cuffed he turned his attention to the wagon. He ripped up the upper board of the bed and discovered a pigtail. When he pulled this vigorously enough he found that there was a Mongolian at the other end of 1t. Then he began to work with vigor, and inside of a half hour he had fourteen Chinese handcuffed to each other and tied to the wagon wheel. They were sorry. looking lot. How long they had been lying in the wagon was hard to tell. They had to lie flat on their stom. achs, breathing through holes cut in the bottom of the bed. Every jolt must have been agony to them, and as the air they did get was generous. ly charged with alkali dust, they mar. rowly escaped suffocation. The steer. age quarters that they had on the trip home were palatial in comparison to those which they occupied in trying to cross the line. The Mexican did time in the penitentiary. That wagon load of hay was worth just $2,SO0.- San Francisco Chronicle.
 A
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
Knew the Sex.

"Your wife is a very sick woman," said the grave old physician. land while I do not wish to alarm you, I have my doubts as to her recovery"
 "Oh, she'll pull through all right, doc. tor," replied the wise husband. "Her dressmaker sent home a new gown yes terday and she hasn't tried it on."
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
A Degenerate.

Kind Lady-Have you always been a tramp? Were you never any high er3
 Tramp-Oh! yes'm. uster be . second-story worker and porch-climber
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27

The green tree frog is an excellent barometer. Put him in jar with an inch or two of water at the bottom and little ladder running up to the top. If the weather is to be fine, he will as- cend; if bad, he will go down.
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
Mistake Somewhere.

"Mr. Millyuns," said the poor but aristocratic widow, "allow me to pre- sent my three charming daughters" :"
 Good heavens, madam" exclaim- ed young Millyuns, "there must be a mistake somewhere. Pm not sena- tor from Utah."
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
Easily Pleased.

Jack-Are the new fve-dollar silver certificates out?
 George-I haven't noticed any.
 Jack-Oh, well it doesn't matter much. One of the old ones will do, if you can let me have it for few days.
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
Jarring an Actor.

"What did you think of my death scene" asked the actor.
 "Well, it seemed to me it came little too late in the piece," was the reply.- Chicago Evening Post.
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
Love in the Dark.

"See here, young man," roared the irate parent, didn't I tell you to leave when the clock struck 10? Now, light out"
 "The l-light has ben out for some -time." stnmmered the ardent youth.
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
He Pays the Freight.

Husband-That is an exceptionally pretty hat you have on, my dear.
 Wife-I'm so glad you like it, John. I bought it on your account.
 Husband-Oh, of course. You always do.
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27

One god helps the Celestial to braid his pig tail; another protects it from the grasp of an enemy. He has gods Of the eyes, of the eye-lds, of the hair, of the lips, teeth, chin, ears, tongue, throat, stomach, arms, legs, knees. feet, toes and nails.
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
Wonder How He Knew.

"Say, pa," queried little Johnny Bum pernickle. "what is the meaning of dis sipate?"
 Tt is synonymous with dizzy-pate the next morning, my son." replied the old man.
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
Not News.

Jimson (proudly)-I never deceive my wife-no, sir; tell her everything. Hlson-Yes, I knew that long ago. "Wha-howW
 "She tells it all to my wife and my wife tells it to me-"
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
False Hopes.

Flannigan-Say, Moike, this won't do. People say you are shwate on Mrs. Fla herty-and she q married woman.
 Mike-phwist! Not wurrd. Thot's only so Oi can go on borryin' terbacky av old Flaherty. He's in hopes Oi'll elope wid Ter.
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
A Scientific Fact,

According to this paper" said Mrs. Jaggsby, "a physician has discovered that alcohol strengthens a mans eye sight. What rank nonsensew
 Tt is perfectly true, my dear," re- piled Jaggsby. Tt makes him see lot of things that never existedw
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
Conflicting Evidence.

The Widow-I wonder why Minerva was called the goddess of wisdom?
 The Bachelor-Probably because she wasn't foolish enough to marry.
 The Wi1ow-Then why was Solomon, who had thousand wives, called the wisest man?
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
The Car q TYrant.

Mrs. Lakeside-The atrocities of Rus sian tyranny are perfectly awful.
 Friend-What have you learned?
 Mrs. Lakeslde-I saw in q paper this morning that in Russia no one is permit ted to marry more than five times.
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
"TOM CRiNGLE'S LOG."
One of the Old Predictions of Panama
 Canal.

One of the Old Predictions of q Panama
 Canal.
 Some of the oldest accounts of the Isthmus of Panama-it was formerly called Darien-are among the most impressive, including that of the eX- ploring expedition led half century ago by Lieutenant Strain, with terri ble vicissitudes, says the Buffalo Cour- fer. A still earlier description Is found in book which was popular many years ago, From Cringle's Log" one of the most picturesque ever written about the sea and the West Indies and the Spanish Main. Strangely, too, the author, Michael Scott, seems to have been a staid Scotch merchant of Glas- gow; but he lived in the West Indies much of the time between 1906 and 1922. The story was first printed in Blackwood's Magazine.
 Sent with dispatches from Charges, now Colon, across the isthmus to the town of Panama at the Pacific side, Toms description of the route is in part:
 At 4 p. m. proceeded up the river, which is here about 100 yards across and very deep. It rolls sluggishly along through low, swampy country, covered to the waters edge with thick sedges and underwood, below which the water stagnates and generates my riads of mosquitoes and other trouble some insects and sends up whole clouds of noxious vapors, redolent with yellow fever and ague and cramps and all manner of uncomfortable things AS the day dawned the dull, gray, steamy clouds settled down on us once more, while the rain fell in regular waterspout. It was anything but a cheering prospect to look along the dreary vlstas of the dull, brimful, Lethe.like stream, with nothing to be seen but the heavy, lowering sky above, the red, swollen water beneatl and the gigantic trees towering over head, and growing close to the water's edge, laced together with black, snake like withes, while the jungle was thick and impervious, and actually grew down into the water, for beach, O. shore or cleared bank there was nont all water and underwood excep' where a heavy, soft, slimy steaming black bank from out the dead waters near the shore, with one or more mon strous alligators sleeping upon 1t, like dirty, rotten logs of wood, scarcely deigning to lift their abominable long shouts to look at us as we passed I should think, judging from my barometer-but l may have made an inaccurate calculation, and have no Humboldt by me-that the ridge oi the highest is 1,5OO feet above the lev ell of the sea, so that 1t would be next to impossible to join the two seas at this point by a canal with water in It. However, expect to see joint stock company set a-going some fine day yet for the purpose of cutting it; that is, when the national capital next accum ulates (and Lord knows when that will bel to a plethora and peoples purses become so distended that they require bleeding"
 Mistake Somewhere.
 "Mr MillyunS" said the poor but
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
A Woman of Uncertain Age.

"How old would you say she was?"
 "Well, let's zee. When we were in high school together she used to snub me because 1 was kid. Now I'm thirty seven, and um-m-m-well, should say she was about twenty-eight by this time."-Towu and Country.
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
In After Years.

Just thirty years ago to-day
 She was a leading lady, But time somehow gets away And now she's a soubrette gay Of sweet sixteen-maybe.
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
A Choice of Voices.

"Miss Chatterton? think I'll send her word that I'm out"
 Wont the still, small voice reproach you"
 "Yes, but I'd rather listen to the still, small voice than to Miss Chatterton."- Puck.
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27

A microscopic examination of a hair will determine, with almost infallible certainty, to what kind of animal 1t be- longed.
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
Two Financiers,

Wigg-I always try to make my money last.
 Wagg-I try to make mine first, anC then make it ]ast.-Philadelphi Record.
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
No Room.

Oldwed-Do you and your wife quar rel3
 Newwed-No, we live in flat ant there is no room for argumept.-Mani' toba Free Press.
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27
The Point of View.

"Have you good cook?" asked Mu. Bond Hill.
 Yes. she's good enough" replied Mrs. Chester Park. "She attends church three times week and all that, but her cooking is something fierce"
Holbrook argus., 1904-08-27

During 1903 only 2,13O persons were admitted to citizenship under the nat. uralization laws of France.
The Waxahachie daily light. [volume] (Waxahachie, Tex.) 1894-current, 1904-08-06
Cheap Rates Via HAT. c. R. n.

Nashville, Tenn sale Aug. s
aud o. Rate s24.05. Limited Aug.
Ii. Extension OF final limit granted.
Los Angles and san Francisco
On sale Aug. Is TO Sept. 10 inclusive.
Rate s45. Limit Oct. %.
st. Louis Coach Excursion-Ti Tick
cts on sale Aag. Is and y. Rate
sl4.l0. Limit seven days.
Louisville, Ky.-On sale Aug. l.
to Is. Rate $3.50 Limit Aug. 81.
Extension granted.
Boston, Mass. On sale Aug. II !,
l. and Is, Rate S43.l5. Limited
Aug. 70. Extension granted.
Austin, Texas, on sale sept. 18th
and 18th. Rate, $3.50; limit, Sept,
End.
Galveston, Texas, on sale Oct.
9th and l0th. Rate, 81 81; limit, Oct,
l4th.
St. Louis Moon sale to Novem-
bar 10th, rate s26.s0. Limit 60 days
from date OF sale.
St Louis, Moon sale To Nov.
30th, rate s22.l0. Limit Is days
from date Of sale.
Galveston sale August IL and
Ia. Rate $500. Limit August Il.
Fl. worth-on sale August - and
.. Rate sl.70. Limit August ~.
LaPorte, Texas-On sale August
! and q; Rate $50. Limit Aug. II.
T II. BARROW. Agent
The Waxahachie daily light. [volume] (Waxahachie, Tex.) 1894-current, 1904-08-06
p E r s o n A L s


~~~~~~ AA~@~~< .
Deputy Sheriff Forbes was In Italy
today.
Joe Thompson of Dallas was In
the city today.
Robert Watson mas returned from
visit to Mexia.
NJ. ID. Hickman of Haleyville, /.
T., is in the city.
Constable Coffev of Milford was
in the city yesterday.
Miss Alice Whitley went TO Gle
barne this morning to visit friends.
Miss Mai Porter Of Dallas spent
last night in the city with her pa
rents.
Mrs. j. f. Leigh returned last
night from visit TO the Worlds
Fair.
Miss Russell Leigh left for
Hearne this morning 10 visit rela-
lives.
Miss Eta Wilson OF Fort Worth
is visiting the family OF J. w. Sin
gleton.
Mrs J. L. Manning and children
went to Italy and Avalon this morn
ing to visit relatives.
w. A. Gibson, wife and two sons
returned this morning from n visit
to Tullahoma, Tenn,
Mrs. A. Davis, who has been Wis
iting relatives in Corsicana, re-
turned home last night.
Miss Pet Roberts of Coraieana,
who has been visiting in the city :,
returned home this morning.
Mr.. and Mrs. w. f. Hipp left this
morning for st. Louis 10 spend a
lew days at the Worlds Fair.
Attorneys Y. d. Kemble, r. h.
Williams and 7, p. Whipple attend
ed justice court at Italy today.
Mrs. G. T. Spalding and sister,
Miss Ruth Strong. went To Dallas
this morning To visit relatives.
Miss Pearl Hood, Of Savoy, who
has been visiting her brother, w.
p. Hood. and wife, returned home
today.
II. y. Peters will leave tomorrow
morning for st. Louis to see the
Worlds Fair. From there he will
go to New York and other points In
the east Oh pleasure trip.
The Waxahachie daily light. [volume] (Waxahachie, Tex.) 1894-current, 1904-08-06

Mrs. s. II. Watson went to Waco
this morning to stay with her daagh-
ter, Mrs. r. l.. Matthews, until Mr..
Matthews returns from New York.
Miss Bessie Morris Of Fort Worth,
who for the past two weeks has been
the guest of her cousin, Miss Mossie
Morris, returned home yesterday
afternoon.
Mr.. and Mrs. w. II. Getzendaner
left this morning for St. Louis, Chi
cago and other points in the east
where they win spend the remain
der of the summer.
The Waxahachie daily light. [volume] (Waxahachie, Tex.) 1894-current, 1904-08-06
BAPTIST CHURCH.

The pastor of the Baptist church
has returned from Midlothian and
will be present at all the services.
$50 a. m. Sunday School.
1l:00 a. m. Preaching by the pas
tor.
7:15 ?. m. b. Y. p. l.. meeting.
sis p. m. Preaching by the pas
tor.
b. A. COPAsS, Pastor.
Ed Williams and William Skin
ner accompanied Rod Skinner to
Mineral Wells this morning where
he will be kept several days.
The Waxahachie daily light. [volume] (Waxahachie, Tex.) 1894-current, 1904-08-06

For hiiiousness. headache, dyspepsia
take Dr Thacaeg'a Liver aud Blood syrup.
The Waxahachie daily light. [volume] (Waxahachie, Tex.) 1894-current, 1904-08-06
Civil Service Examination.

A civil service examination was
held in Waxaha chie today for rural
carrier, city carrier and clerk.
Eleven applicants took the examin-
alton for rural carrier aud three for
city carrier. In point of numbers of
applicants this was one of the most
successful examinations that has
been conducted here in some time.
The roof is being put on the new
8 hOOl building.
The Waxahachie daily light. [volume] (Waxahachie, Tex.) 1894-current, 1904-08-06
Pulpit and Pew
FIRsr METHODIST CHURCH

FIRST METHODIST CHURCH
Preaching by the pastor, II a. m.
Junior League, 5:30 p. m. 4
Senior League, 7;l5 p. m.
Preaching by the pastor, 8:15 p. m.
Everybody cordially invited to all
of these services. Strangers have a
warm welcome.
j. G. PUTNAM, Pastor.
MAIN STREET CHRISTIAN CHURCH.
Fruitful or Fruitless" will be the
subject of the sermon at the Main
Street Christian church at IL a. m.
tomorrow. At S:l5 p. IN. Mr.. w. H q.
Bagby of Phoenix, Arizona, will
preach. His sermon on "In His
Steps" will be illustrated by the use
of a stereopticon. Sunday school
will meet at $3.50 q. m. We cordially
invite the members of such congre-
cations as may not have services to
meet with us. All others will also
be heartily welcomed.
CHALMERS MCPHERSON,
Minister.
FIRST PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH.
Sunday school $3.50 a. m.
Preaching bv the pastor at IL a.
N. and S;l5 p. m.
j. n. IVY, Pastor.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-08-31
TIME EXTENDED.
American Shippers Given Opportunity
to Prepare an Appeal.

st. Petersburg, Aug. S1.-There is
no disposition to take snap judgment
on the American shippers in the case
of the protest against the confscation
of the flour on board the Portland and
Asiatic line steamer Arabia, captured
by the armored cruiser Gromoboi, of
the Vladivostok squadron, July %. The
period for taking an appeal will be
extended until the parties in the Unit
ed States who are interested in the
appeal prepare their papers.
1t was announced from Washington
August 26, that the state department
in reply to a request for information
from the Portland Flour Milling COM
pany, the owners of a large part of
the cargo of the steamer Arabia, had
notified the company that the United
States would take no part in the pros
ecutfon of the damage claims against
the Russian government. The state
department added in it's letter of in
formation that the firms whose goods
were seized by Russia must be repre-
Sented by legal counsel at the prize
court at VladiVOStok and the admiralty
court at st. Petersburg and recon-
mended that Russian attorneys be en-
ployed- The statement was also made
that upon the American cargo owners
rested the burden of proof and that
they must be prepared to make good
their claim that the goods seized were
not contraband and to establish the
amount demanded by them as indem-
nifty to be fair and reasonable
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-08-31

truth about the whole thing as was
done in this paper last night.
The morning paper asserts that it
has been common knowledge among
the people interested in baseball in
Topeka for the past two months, that
Logan and Sheard had transferred the
franchise to themselves. Just to show
that the Capital talked through its
hat, every member of the board of di-
rectors was asked this morning when
he first heard of the alleged transfer.
And to q man, beyond Sheard and Lo-
that it was news to them until ex-
posed in the State Journal on Tuesday
night.
The directorate is composed of the
following men: c. X Holiday, w. L.
Taylor, W. F. 1S)gan, Thomas Sheard,
Ralph Moore and John Waters. Here
are their answers:
c. K. Holiday: "All news to me
until I saw it in the Journal last night.
1 have nothing to say
W. L. Taylor: Il never heard of it be-
fore. I haven't had chance to inquire
into it either
Ralph Moore: Didn't know a thing
John Waters: mo. never heard of
it before
There are the facts. The names men
toned above are those of the men who
were chosen an executive committee,
with Sheard as president and Logan as
secretary to look after the baseball af-
fairs. Not a single word had been said
TO them. Yet the Capital declares that
everybody interested in baseball affairs
had known all about it for two months
And in addition to that it might be
mentioned a clincher that not a
member of the Ball Park association
was acquainted with the fact until the
State Journal printed it last night.
The Capital made one more state
ment. 1t said that Sheard and Logan
went into their pockets to supply the
deficiency every time that there was
one. In a single instance when the sal
aries were due and not enough money
was on hand, Mr.. Sheard, Mr.. Logan
and one other member of the board of
directors put up $50 each, with the un-
that it was to be imnedi-
ately taken out of the gate receipts Of
the next few days. And it was. 1t
was taken out before anything else.
Mr. Sheard and Mr.. Logan deserve
credit for their efforts on behalf of base
ball in Topeka. They have done the
bulk of the work and ought to be paid
for their services. But there are other
people who deserve consideration and
who have spent their money to make
baseball in Topeka a success.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-08-31
NO, SAYS SHIVELY
Sheard and Logan Mistaken
About Baseball Franchise.
Owned by the Topeka AssOcia-
tion Says President.
STIRS UP EXCITEMENT.
Announcement in State Journal
Starts the Talk.
Acted Fairly.
STIRS UP EXCITEMENT.

Evidently President Thomas Sheard
and Secretary w. F. Logan of the
baseball association are mistaken
about their ownership of the fran
chise of the Topeka ball team. It is
not made out in their own names, as
Mr.. Sheard stated on Tuesday. The
title reads as follows: ITO the To-
peka Baseball Association, T. E.
Sheard. president, w. F. Logan, sec
retary."
President D. NJ. Shiveley of the Mis-
souri, Valley league. was called up over
the telephone at Kansas City, Kas
this morning and asked to state who
owned the franchise and in whose
name he made it out, and to whom he
intended to give ownership.
His reply was as follows: 81 made
out the franchise to the Topeka Base
ball association, 7. Z. Sheard, presi-
dent, w F. Logan, secretary. 1t was
my intention to make il out to the
association, as il is made out 1
never thought of making it out to Mr.
Sheard or Mr. Logan, or any individ-
uals- The franchise belongs to the
association. On top of that there is
no need to worry over its present own
ership. A franchise. unless sold for
an actual consideration, cannot be
transferred during the playing season
That must be done at the annual meet
Ing of the board of Valley League man
ayers which takes place in Kansas
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-08-31
GOES TO PRINTER.
The Presidents Letter Is Now on Hi
Hands.

Oyster Bay. L. l., Aug. 31.-Havinl
transacted all business of pressing i'm
portance that has been pending sincf
his arrival at Sycamore Hill the pres.
ident will give more time hencefortk
to visitors. A few callers will be re.
ceivec almost every day. Members OF
the international arbitration confer.
ence which is to be held in st. Louii
in the next ten days will be received
at the White House on September "a
The delegates will be the guests of the
nation while in this country, congress
having appropriated $4,000 for theii
entertainment. Many of the delegates
and others are expected in a day or
two.
The presidents letter of acceptance
was taken to New York last night by
Assistant Secretary Barnes and placed
in the hands of a printer. 1t will re-
quire several days to make IL ready fo1
distribution and publication.