Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1904-12-31

if body keeps to safe investments, and
I'm so poor dat you could tip me better
dan l could tip YOU
Madam will have her Joke says Duch-
ess. as soft as silk. / am always so pleased
to see Madam dat it matters not wedder
Madam remembers me or not. l am de-
lighted to see dat Madam is looking SO
young dis year: each New Year Madam
q chill ride coming up from de station,
and 1 have took de liberty of bringing
Madam a little cocktail of de kind dat my
husband makes so WE'LL
Your husband eh!'' snorts Old Lady.
but she fastens on to de drink. and makes
hole in de glass. Your husband Is a
mischeivous young man. and wins all de
savings from my soivants when he visits
em-but dis is good cocktail"
Madam is pleased to be amiable,' says
Duchess But it is because of Madam's
good healt. Surely 1 never seen madam
looking in such good healt before. Mad
ans good healt makes her of such good
nature dat she will not care to hear any
of de gossip 1 have to tell, because it is all
for to laugh; and Madam does not need
anything to make her laugh-except her
own good healt and spirits and nature
IF you mean dat you have any of your
| delightful scandal for me, Hortense, let
| me have it quick, for 1 never know how
wicked all my frens are until I've heard
your yearly budget of der SINS
IF Madam will have de poor little bud
get of news dat Hortense has kept for her
benefit, den 1 will oblige her." says Hor-
tense. But we do not have tea until half
past g. and to wait for tea would exhaust
Madam so 1 have had cook put a little
| bird on de fire for Madam, and my husband
will bring cold little bottle of de wine
| M Sieu Paul best likes, and as Madam re-
| freshes herself wit moutful and a bite
Hortense will tell her de little news she has
saved for her."
Dat was my signal to get busy. and 1
| soon has de hot bold and de cold bot in
Old LadV'S and she nackS a If
| til de bot was dry and only de bones of de
| bold was left to tell de tale; and den
Duchess she tell her de record of some la
| dies and gents dat would surprise DER
| parsons to hear Old Lady laughs and
chuckles till she near falls in a fit; and by
| de time Duchess has finished her off wit a
glass of sweet booze, and give her cigar
| cite, de Old Lady she says, "Hortense you
are wicked and witty French goil, and
don't believe a void you have said; but
you do amuse me So dat if you will find
| me purse I'll see if dere is bill in it for
you. I'm paying all sorts of stupid people
around me who never amuse and always
beg. so why shouldn't 1 tip you who never
beg and always amused!
Wouldn't you wonder dat a gol dat can
unlooSen from party hard to part
from DER goods as Old Lady-wouldn't you
wonder date a goil who can win off such
party wouldn't let me collect and keep
what can from de gents! Nay, nay!
Let me tell you, on de level nobody but
dose dat are floating in long. green can
afford to come to house parties It's
cheaper to give EN- dan to go to EN-. OATS
a fact. From de stable boys to de chef,
every one is tipped. De coachman dat
brings guest up from de station. de man
on de box who hands EN- in ana out of de
traps de house footman dat carries DER
wraps up to de rooms, de housemaids dat
fetches DER tea or coffee in de mornings,
de butler and second man dat coives Ouch
ess, of course, who's busy all over de lot,
and Newell, I'm always on handle
cook, even de stable hands and de outside
man who shovels de snow away from de
carriage block-every mug of us has to be
tipped and tipped again, till I wonder
where de guests gets de long green dey
parts wit when dey is having free board
and lodging at house party. And de
men!-dey has boxes of flowers and candy
come down from town every day, dey has
| card and billiard losses to make good. and
we'll say what tell! And dey pays all
dis for what gets wit wages. I tink we
soivants has de soft end of de game.
But was going to tell you about de
time de kiddies had, little Fa- ME and my
kid. Little Chimmie is still to our house.
for little Fannie she sets up such hoiler
when l said 1 would send Kiddie to me
modder for de New Year, dat we had to
keep him. Miss Fannie tells EN- not to get
gay on de ground floor, what de florist and
decorator was woiking on for de day be-
fore de party, so dey keeps to little Fan
MES play room pretty much. Dey was SO
quiet dere for so long dat goes up to see
what dey doing dat dey shouldn't Wei,
| it was soicus! Over DER own close
dey had some dinky little dresses little
Fannie had for fancy dress party when
she was about as high wine c1oler.
De one she had on was blue and Kiddies