Waterbury evening Democrat., 1904-01-04

women to live with they would have broken my neck inside of three months''
 sBut she didn't mean it, of course" smiled Mrs. Bowser. "She's also bit own, as we all have, but there isn't better hearted man living. Is it too late to go to the theater tonight?'
 ..I'd go to the theater with you forty times over," replied Mr. Bowser, but tonight feel like talking. I want you to be assured that I have reformed There will be no further coming home to raise row on my part because the front gate happens to be standing open"
 Mrs. Bowser realized that she could not get away from the position and that she would have to see 1t through and abide by the consequences, and she made up her mind to face them bravely. MT. Bowser walked to and fro with his hands clasped behind his back, followed by the cat, and presently halted to say:
 "Yes, if there is any more bulldozing around this house you will have to be the bulldozer yourself. And can tell you here and now that am through fooIing my time and money away buy ing patent beehives and grasshopper traps. What an ass have been! And what an angel you have been to put up with my foolishness! l can't quite expect that you can ever forgive me. but please do the best you can.'
 There were tears in MT. Bowser's os. There were also tears in Mrs. I, ser's eyes. There would also have been tears in the eyes of the family cat if she hadn't made great effort and crushed them back. The fearful interval lasted for three or four min utes, and then MT. Bowser said:
 'sYes, I have wasted thousands of dollars investing in gimcracks, and each and every time against your ad- vice. People have taken me for soft mark for years and years, but couldn't see it. The end has come at last, however. The next man who takes me for a flat is going to get badly left"
 T am glad to hear you say so," re- piled Mrs. Bowser, although lots of other men have probably been just as foolish Is business at the office good?"
 T can't understand" he continued, ignoring her question, about my buy ing that old COW last spring, The man warranted her to be new milk COW, and only four years old, but you told me he was lying about it. Instead of needing what you said, I went and paid $45 for the animal, and how. did it turn out?''
 "Oh, well, that was months ago. Do you think we are going to have snow before morning?''
 T know it was months ago, but what happened? It was not new milk COW. Instead of ten quarts of milk per day she dropped to three. Instead of being four years old she was nearer fourteen I tried to stick 1t out and bluff you down, hut I was ashamed Of myself all the time. The day got rid of her for $15 heaved great sigh of relief. That reminds me of another thing want to own up to-. s
 "But why not let it all go, dear7 Let's run over to the Browns for an hour or two"
 T can't let it go. I must make a clean breast of things while am about it. told you got $6o for the cow.''
 "Y-e-s, but
 Hold on! I lied about the price. I told you that a man bought her to send her to the White House as gift to the president. I lied about that Yes, I lied like trooper. She was bought for her hide and soap grease. When I think of how I lied about that cow when think
 MT. Bowser's emotions overcame him, and tears stood in his eyes again. Mrs. Bowser, as loyal, loving wife, couldn't do less than wipe tears from her own, but the cat puckered up her mouth and purred softly and seemed to be saying to herself:
 ''Yes, this is where the tears come in, but you wait little while. If the court knows itself this performance is not yet half over.''
 And there's another thing,'' began MT. Bowser, as he steadied his voice and sat down and got up again two or three times. T wanted to buy hog, and you said"
 At that moment the door bell rang, and, the girl being out, Mrs. Bowser went to the door. A boy stood there, and as soon as the door was open he pushed cobbler's bench into the hall and went whistling away.
 What on earth is this?" was asked of MT. Bowser as he came down the hall.
 "T-I-bought it at auction,' he stam- mered as he colored up. T had for gotten all about it. "But it's cobbler's bench.''
 Yes, I know"
 And why, in the name of goodness did you buy it? Are you going to turn cobbler and cobble shoes for the neigh bors ?''
 You know I'm not" he answered in pungent tones. T bought it as g souvenir, of course. That bench is over 200 years old. It used to stand in the palace of Henry the-the something of England"
 "Who said soY'
 sTFhe auctioneer It may he only g