Middlebury register. (Middlebury, Vt.) 1886-1937, 1904-11-04

I don't care how much or how little |
money you make, 1 want you to I'M
derstand that there's only one place in
the world where you can live a happy
life, and that's inside your income. a
family that's living beyond its means
is simply business that's losing mon
ey, and it's bound to go to smash. And
to keep q safe distance ahead of the
sheriff you've got to make your wife
help. More men go broke through bad
management at home than at the Of
fee. And 1 might add that lot of
men who are used to getting only one
dollars worth of food for a five dol
lar bill downtown expect their wives
to get five dollars worth Of food for
one dollar bill at the corner grocery
and to save change toward a pair Of
diamond earrings. These fellows would
plant a tin can and kick because they
didn't get a case of tomatoes.
OF course some women put their
husbands salaries on their backs in
stead of his ribs, but there are heap
more men who burn up their wives
new sealskin sacks in two bit cigars.
Because a mans a good provider 1t
doesn't always mean that he's a good
husband; 1t may mean that he's hog.
And when there's a cuss in the family,
and 1t comes down to betting which,
on general principles the man always
carries my money. l make mistakes
at it, but it's the only winning sys-
tenn I've ever been able to discover in
games of chance.
You want to end the wedding trip
with n business meeting and talk to
your wife quite as frankly as you
would to a man whom you'd taken in
to partnership. Tell her just what
your salary is and then lay 1t out be-
tween you-so much for joint ex-
penses, the house and the horsekeep-
ing, so much for her expenses, so
much for yours and so much to be
saved. That last is the one item on
which you can't afford to economic.
It's the surplus and undivided profits
|, account of your business, and until
the concern accumulates a big one it
isn't safe to move into offices on Easy
] street
A lot Of fool fathers only give their
fool daughters liberal cducation in
spending. and it's pretty hard to teach
those women the real facts about
earning and saving, but it's got to be
done unless you want to be the fool
husband of a fool wife. These girls
have an idea that men get money by
going to benevolent old party be
hind some brass bars and showing a
check at him and telling him that they
want it in fifties and hundreds.
You should take home your salary
in actual money for awhile and ex-
plain that it's all you got for sweating
like dog for ten hours day through
six long days and that the cashier
handed it out with an expression as
If you We're robbing the cash drawer
Of an orphan asylum. Make her I'M
derstand that while those that have
get, when they present check, those
that haven't get it in the neck. EX-
plain that tie benevolent old party is
only on duty when papa's daughter
has Il papa that Bradstreet rates IA,
>. and that when papa's daughters hus
band presents a five dollar check with
ten cent overdraft he's received by
low browed old brute who calls for
the bouncer to put him out Tell her
right at the start the worst about the
butcher, and the grocer, and the ice
man, and the milkman, and the
plumber, and the gas meter-that they
want their money and that 1t has to
come out of that little roll of bills
Then give her enough to pay them
even If you have to grab for youl
lunch from a high stool. | used tC
know an old Jew who said that the
\ man who carved was always foo
or a hog, but you've got to learn moi
to divide your salary on either basis
Make your wife pay cash. y woman
never really understands money til
she's done that for awhile. I've no
ticed that people rarely pay down thu
money for foolish purchases; the.
charge them. And it's mighty seldom
that a woman's eXtravagant unless sh
or her husband pays the bills by check
There's something about counting GU
the actual lie gal tender on the spot tina
keeps a woman from really wanting
a.