The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1904-02-05

G. B. Moses was complaining yesterday
of the teamster who delivered his coal.
Instead Of going into the cellar and open
ing the window, the team gentleman econ =
omized trifle in time by smashing in
pane of glass and SO opening the window
from the outside.
Mr.. Moses says that neighbor Of his
had a nice rustic fence that he had worked
on for weeks to get in shape. He had
bought $3.50 worth Of woven wire and
had the poles cut at some additional ex-
pense to hold it up. The lot next to his
home was vacant, and he had requested =
the wood baron to have load of his most
wood dumped on it. The baron
complied cheerfu1ly. When the teamster
arrived at the house he was requested TO
dump the wood in the next lot. He de-
on the ground that it was not pro-
fessional He was asked to waive his
rights and to dump the wood where re-
quested. He went away grumbling. In a
few moments a sound Of blows was heard .
and the excited feminine popuIace, look
ing out OF the windows. saw that he had
gone into the barn. obtained an AK and
was chopping down the japanese fence
and cutting away the expensive vines that
II mad taken years to train over the fence.
The damage was done before the wild
feminine outcry reached to the back of
the lot
It is incidents like these that try mems
souls and give them opportunity to exer-
else their spiritual muscle in clearing an
ger, justifable homicide, malice and re-
venge out of the mind.
Doc Bixby says that the top Of the pole
can be seen seventy-six miles north by
west Of Minneapolis. Yes, the tops of
several Poles can be seen in that vicinity.
They each own from 80 to $50 acres and
are making very comfortable fortunes
every year-and not beeflng all the time
about the cold, either.
Jersey City has an undertaken for q
mayor, and he would cheerfully bury tho
alleged wit who put Grape on the hy-
drants.
Some millionaire ought to start a Mrs.
Maybrick relief expedition.
| Mr.. Whitney was very sick man and
the operations seems to have been justi-
! fed by the conditions found. But all the
same, they will have to chloroform us be-
fore they get any of our interior.
1t has warmed up a little after over
six weeks of winter in January
| There is said to be much unrest in
Korea" man may we'll feel disuuiet
when six or eight internal scoundrels with
revolvers are engaged in setting fire to
MS mouse.
The New York Mail and Express ex-
presses the opinion that radium will not
help US to read infinite purposes nor to
thWart Infinite designs. Certainly no large
number of Infinite designs will be thwarted
While the stuff costs 900 pound.
Speaking Of the familiar way in which
our fathers-and, perhaps their sons-ap-
preached Deity, or, if not the familiar way,
at least the preoccupied way, a story is
| told Of Edward Jewett Wheeler. editor OF
J the Literary Digest, who, in addition ia
his numerous office duties. found time to
deliver speeches for the Citizens Union
during the last campaign in New York
city. At the breakfast table on the morn
ing following one of his particularly ardu-
GUS efforts, all heads were bowed for the
customary grace before the meal whel
Mr.. Wheeler startled his family by start
Ing off in loud voice with:
Mr.. Chairman
The burst of laughter that followed
caused the blessing to be deferred to &
later and less hilarious OCCASION
"A man in Shakopee' who keeps right III
to the times uses compressed food tablets
has omitted his breakfast altogether, takes
his food uncooked, has the raw soaked
wheat craze, is trying the peanut cure fol-
: biscuit or other good-tasting breads, ani
Is said to have a speaking microscopes
acquaintance with more varieties of un
friendly microbe than could comfortabl,
pasture on a damp dog in the summe
solstice. He also discusses his food a
4 great length at meal times and speak,
g openly at table of 'the digestive pro
: cesses" which nature has been modes
: and thoughtful enough to bottle up out O
{. our sight. You might think that wher
. a man paid SO much attention to his In
: terror life that he would be a giant il
stature and intellect. On the contrary
! he presents the appearance of Mr.. Pip
; suffering the pangs of unrequited dyspep
9 STA. We all feel toward the man as Littl
= Bonnie did toward the hen:
" Once my Uncle Bertram had hen that Sc
for five weeks on walnut, two boot heels an
glass stopper She did not hatch any thing
From this we learn that we should have som
y great object In life and stick to it. Let u
\, be punctual In attendance at school and min
!, orr beloved teacher Some hens have feather
= hen is done, you cook her five six hours an
Z then stick a fork into her chest, but prefer
" nice piece Of custard pie. Bonnie.
- When We consider this mind and 1t
ways, we prefer a nice piece Of GUSTAV
pie.
1t For comfortable living give us the ma
m who cultivates the idea that he hasn't an
y organs below the neck. "A. J. r.
,e A LITTLE SODHOUSE IN NEBRASk,