davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-12-04

little roly-poly, little roly-poly yell be. They ain't anything to do that ye ought to do thatll make ye thin an keep ye thin. Tn wan thing in tn wurruld that'1l rayjooce ye surely is lack iv sleep an who wants to lose his mind with his flesh. I'll guarantee with tn aid iv an alartn clock to make amy man a Twin skiliton in thirty days. A lady with a young baby won't niver get no chubbier nor tn gintleman. It's father. Tn on'y ginooine anti-fat threatment is sickness. worry, throuble an insomnya. Tn scales ain't amy judge iv beauty or health. To be beautiful is to be nachral. Ye have gr-reat nachral skia- ny beauty while my good looks Is more buxon. Whin I see an ol fool in sweater an two coats sprintin' up tn sthreet an groanin at ivry step I want to jine with tn little boys that ar-re throwin' bricks at him. If he takes off tn flesh that Nature has was ted on his ongrateful frame, his skin won't fit him. They'se nawthin' more heejous to look at thin a fat man that has rayjooced his weight. He looks as though he had bought his covs-.n' at an auction. It bags undher tn eyes an don't fit in tn neck.
 "A man is foolish that thries to be 100 Kind to his stomach, annyhOw. Fletchers idee is that tn human stC- mach is a kind iv little Lord Fl Intle- roy If ye give it much to do, t wlli pine away. But Dock Casey tells mo 'tis a gr-reat, husky, good-natured pugilists that'll take on most amy thing that comes aong. It will go to wurruk with grin resolution on a piece iv hard coal. It will get tn worst iv 1t but what I mane Is that 1t fears no foe an doesn't dhraw tn color Tlne. wud put it in tn heavy middle weight class an it ought to be kept there. It requires plenty iv exercise to be at It's best an if 1t doesn't get enough. 1t loses It's power ontil a chocolate celair might win against it. It mustn't be all lowed to shirk its jooties. It shud be kept in thrainin'. an. says Dock Casey, IT us owner is a good match maker an doesn't back 1t again opponents that ar-re out iv its class ar too nanny at wan time. 1t will still be doin' we'll whin tn brain is on'y fir fir light ex- ercise."
 Dye expict to go on accumylatin' to tn end iv ye'er days?" asked MT. Hennessy.
 T do that" said Mir Dooley. "I ex- pict to make me frinds wurruk f'r me to tn last. They'll be no gayety among tn pail bearers at me obsequies They'll have no sinycure. Befure they get through with me they'll know they've been to fun'naL
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-12-04

T see tn good woman goin' by here at a gallop today" said MT. Dooley. .
 she's thryinn' to rayjooce her weight" said MT. Hennessy.
 s What fr?'
 T don't know. She looks all right said Mir. Hennessy.
 We'll" said MT. Dooley. us sthrange thing. Neaer ivrybooy ! know is thryin' to rayjooce his weient Why shud a woman want to De thin onless she is thin? Tn idee iv femaie beauty that all gr-reat men firm Jul ius Caesar to mesilf has held. Is much moro like a bar'l thin clothes pole. Hogan tells me that Alexanders wire an Caesars missus was no Hgpt weights:s Martha. Washnton was snort but pleasantly dumpy an Andrew Jack sons good woman weighed two nun dhred an smoked a pipe. Hogan says that all tn potes he knows was In love with not to say fat but ample ladies. Tn, potes thimsilves was thin but tn ladies was chubby. A pote whtn he has wurrekud all day at tn typewriter wants to rest his head on a shoulder that won't hurt. Shakespear's wife was thin an they quarreled. Tn lady
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-12-04
Silent Sufferers.
Modest Women Suffer fin Silence Ratbe,
 Than COnsult Q Physician.


 A sense. of modesty frequently preve,ts women who really sick and sufferine from seeking the aid of a physician. They do not even care to consult their family doctor. They know that they are sick: that their periods are painful: that in ali probability they are suffering from ovarian troubles. or that they have those drag sing pains which always point to prolapsus or falling of the womb. They know they need help. yet do not know how to obtain it.
 To all such speak in candor and in honesty. G. F. P. (Gerstles Female Pana- cea) will positively cure all such conditions. no matter of how long standing or how stubborn.
 This is gospel truth attested and proyed by the grateful testimony of thousands of women who have been rescued from lives of sickness and sorrow by G. F. P.
 "Ah" you say. but perhaps 1t won't do any particular good fin my case"
 We'll. try at UT expense Buy a bottle from your druggist. or if he can not supply you. send q co to the Gerstle Medicine Co., Chattanooga. Tenn. and they will send it prepaid. Take 1t directed and when the bottle is finished. If you can conscientiously say You have not been benefited. your money will be returned instantly by tha man from whom you bought 1t.
 This is very different propositiaN from paying your physician large feearclehether he helps you not. act a
 If you think your case presen or toy un- usual conditions demanding sfuitioh treat ment, write to the Ladies' Aar M Club. care of Gerstle Medicine Co, fICSHT shooga. Tennss and your letter will bewrite Skd by sympathetic women who havdEE. weeifare at heart. lmoney. fri-su
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-12-04

BY HON. GEORGE w. PECK. Ex-Governor of Wisconsin. formerly
 publisher of Pecks Sun, author of
 Peck's Bad Boy" etc.
 Copyright. 1904. by Joseph B. Bow
 les.)
 Waldorf-Astoria, New York.-Dear Uncle Ezra: We are still at this tav- ern, but we don't do anything but sleep here. and stay around in the lobby even- ings to let people look at us, and dad wears that old swallow tail coat he had before the war. but he has got a new SIX hat. since we got here; one of these shiny ones that'is so slick 1t makes his clothes look offul bum. We about went broke on the first supper we had. CT dinner they call 1t here. You see. dad thought this was about e-dollar- "a day house. and that the meals were in- cluded. like they do at Oshkosh, and so when we went down to dinner dad said we wouldn't do thing to old Astor.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-12-04

with his frind Fletcher No? what? Ye don't say? An. didn't Carney resist It! Haw, haw, haw. This eyesther sauce is tn best iver see. Michael. this is like or times. Look at Schwartzmeis- ter. He's Fetching. too. No. be gorry, he's chokin'. I think Carney's watch has stopped. No wondher; he's lookin' at it. Flaw. haw, haw, haw. haw. A good joke on Carney. Did ye iver see such face? Carney. me buck, ye look like a kinetoscope. What Is a face without stomach? Carney. ye make me nervous. If that there idol don't stop fr a minyit. I'll throw something at 1t. Carney, times up. Ye win ye'er bet but twas a foolish wan. l thought ye were goin' to push FTstcher In a wheelbarrow.
 I've known lawn Carney. man an boy fr forty year but I niver knew ontil that minyit that he was O mur- dhrer at heart. Tn look he give us whn he snapped his watch was tur- rble; but tn look he give tn dinner was aven woorse. He set there rr two mortal hours miditatin what form tn assassynations wud take an Fletchin' each wan iv us in his mind.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-12-04

He let me order the dinner, but told me to order everything on the bill-offare. because we wanted to get the worth of our three dollars a day. Well, honest l couldn't ord IT ail there was, cause you couldn't have got 1t all on a billiard tabel, Say, that list they gave me had everything on 1t that WIS ever ct or drunk. but I told dad they would fire Us out if we ordered the whole prescrIp- tion. so all I ordered was terrapin. can- vas-back duck. oysters, clans, crabs, a lot of new kinds of fish, and some beef and mutton, and turkey, and wood- cock. and partridge, and quail. ar En- glish pheasant, and Holsters aud salads and ices, and pie and things, Just te stay our stomach, and when 1t came to wine dad weakened, because he didn't want to set a bad example to me, so> he ordered hard cider for his- self, and asked me if l wanted anything to drink. and ordered brown pop. You'd a been tickled to see the waiter when he took that order. cause l don't s'pose anybody ever ordered ci- der and brown pop there since Astor skinned muskrats for a living, when he was a trapper up north. Gosh. but when they brought that dinner in. you ought to have seen the sensation 1t created Most of the people ;n the great dining hall looked at dad as though he was q Grasses. or a Eockfel- Ter, and the head waiter bowed low to dad, and dad thought 1t was Astor. and dad looked dignified and hurt at 3eing spoken to by a common taverl feeper. Well. we ct and ct, but we couldn't get away with hardly any of 1t. and dad wanted to wrap some of the duck and Holsters and things In a newspaper and take it to the room for lunch. but the walters wouldn't have 1t. But the cyclone struck the house when dad and I got up to go out of the dining room. and the waiter brought dad the check.
 What is this?" said dad. as he put on his glasses and looked at the check. which was $43 and over.
 Dinner check, sir" said the walter.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-12-04

- to the condolence of a dramatic critic. according to The San Antonio Express. For years and years" the writer said. you haven't missed perform ance. New here you lie. helpless as a corpse."
 "As helpless as corpse" said Mir. Barnabee: Tor as helpless as two ine- briates of whom heard the other day. These two men had dined together. and. after, dinner. had set too long over their coffee. their liquor. their brandy. and so on. When 1t came time for them to SC. .home.s they were in very bad way. Helpless, in fact. They leaned on one another, going, with linked arms, but each. as reed to lean on was rotton.
 Finally they fell, and. with a loud splash, they rolled into a full gutter. A police officer appeared and grabbed the upper man by the collar.
 "No. no: save my friend. Never mind me; I can swim!"
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-12-04

in man. And yet the actor must try to be as attractive as possible, even if he is obliged to have recourse to paint and to false beard and hair.
 'The actor is jealous of the actress The courtesy of the well educated man vanishes before the footlights. and the actor who in private life would render a service to a woman in any difficulty will pick a quarrel with her on the stage.
 He would risk his life to save her from any danger in the road. on the railway or on q boat, but when once on the boards he will not do anything to help her out of difficulty if her memory should fail, or If she should
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-12-04

by The Telegraph. that on the stage men are more jealous of women than
 women are of one another. T have met with many enemies among male actors and with few among women," says the Divine Sarah" T think that the dramatic art is essentially feminine. To paint one's face. to hide ones feelings, to try to please and to endeavor to- attract attention-these are all faults for which we blame wo- men. yet for which great indulgence is shown. These defects seem odious
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-12-04

make a false step he would not hesi- tate to push her.
 T hav performed with certain cele- brated actors Nho have played me some bad tricks. On the other hand there are some actors who are admir- able men who are more men than com edians when on the stage"
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-12-04

I walked home with him to see that he came to no harm. Near tn house he wint snto a bakers shop an bought four pies an a bag iv doughnuts. I've promised to take thim home to me wife he says. I thought she was out iv town, says l. She'll be back in a week. says he; an annyhow. Misther Doaley. I'll thank ye not to be pryin' into me domestic affairs he says.
 "An there wc ar-re. Whats tn use iv goin' up again tn laws iv Nature. says I. If Nature intinded ye to be a
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-12-04

The Department of Agriculture has recently imported five woolless sheep for use in the extreme Southern States. A heavy crop of wool is burden in hot. dry districts, resulting In direct nl-effect on the quality of the mutton.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-12-04

These sheep are being experimented with by the Bureau of Animal Indus try. They are hardy and are easy keepers. They were brought from the Barbados, where they proved profitable. Country Life In America.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-12-04

Why Actors are Jealous. New York World. Mime. Bernhardt. who is high author ity. tells a French interviewer, quoted
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-12-04
sreCleIIan to Be Renominated.

New York, Dec. R.-The declaration was made today by Charles F. Murphy. leader of Tammany Hall, that Mayor George B. Mcclellan would be renom- mated for another term.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-12-04

as he strengthened back and held out his hand.
 "why, ain't this house run on the American plan," said dad, as his chin began to tremble.
 "No, sir, on the Irish plan" said the waiter. You pays for what you hor- ders," and dad began to dig up. He looked. at me as though was to blame.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-12-04
HcInlcaa.

H. c. Barnabee. the veteran actor. lay, disabled from fall. and listened
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-12-04
mR. DOOceY on BHnC1n6

fCo,yrfxht, 1904 by Mcclure Phillips and Conpany) Ss<SSssseTeeeSeSS%sS
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1904-09-04
Bv Dr.. ANDREW WILSON

Here we have dlffused sensation, all parts
being sensitive. but the margin 81 thd4
body probably, through use and won't,
being more sensitive than the inner porss
sttons. Now let Rus SUPP ose--w hat Is noS5
at oil \ an unlikely thing Y that one part
OF such al body. receives Impressions oven
and above another part w hat, It may
be asked, will be the result? q heS answeEg
is that from such a. point rnessag es to the
5interio r will be more and more readily
sent. In due season, such a. track used &
continually will Il develop a m lore acutea
isensltiveness, and N the trac ok, deflnitelX
outlined. will become a 4'nerve. ''s$8 M
$S This genesis OF a. nerve Is h not unsups
ported by the facts Of blolog It reseriss
bles the case Of the little rill 5of water
which flows down on i he sand 81 At first
{ It n. Is absorbed, but the further flow
4 makes q channel, Swhich8is deepened into
/ q definite track by succes sive IN crementss,
sof3fluid. 1 Nerve tracks, thus utllned. tend
to the development h OF wing #centerss
in the shape Of n rye cells III and these 1.
X last, once established, constitute the basis
gofs a nervous syst EN-. In come such way
aided BY the scientific use OF the GimaginA.E
ton, we may conceive the nervous sid 5ofg
life It's have or iginated.t At least such gas
view OF things bridges over the ot her,vRiseS
Eimpass able gulf ethat separa ties the monad
siri$ THE pool from the highestE intelll gencaS
5sthe world kno WIS. 3ES
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1904-09-04

tation OF the stimulus ID apparent.
1t lis different IN the case OF the AMI
NAL, There We find the living matter is
all In one piece, 80 to speak. It ssd1sesl
either Living mntter divided by cell
walls. or 1t develops the lines OF comnu-
3nication which we term nerves" between
one part$of It's body and another. When
ono portion OF tho animal 1a stimulated,
we can see how the message Is readily
conveyed q to another part, N q r radiated
Through the entire frame. NJ ton and
response are. therefore, ma ural II to the
animal, as hey are unexpected and un-
known to the average plant. All depends,
here upon the fundamental constitution
OF the being w NM 3
s:s The real problem OF the rise OF q. Sner-.
avous system. like SO many other Dues
I tions in \ biology and science ut large
depends on our forming some ad e1uate
Initial stop, such as 4 is Sconsisteit with
TACT IT. Is the case here OF le premier
pas. Once start fairly. and Il the rest Of
the journey Is clearly outlined. SpencerSsI
idea Of the evolution Of a nerv sys \
TEN supplies us with "a definite thought
against which, so far as II know, no b..
lection can beSurged \ ~ start wi tn the
body OF an animalcuis, w hlch consists
d OF a mass Of sensitive living matter. In
Virtue OF this sens tiveness its ca pturess
Its prey by thro wing Its bod vi a. round the
particles which come in con tact VI Oh ~,
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1904-09-04

the diamond" hill In Kawashi. assoc so
clated with the strong and splendid years
Of a bygonc dynasty. One arnlored cr,i i3
aer Is called Iwate from fertile pro-
vince. Wild Idsunio brings TO every ia pat
nese mind the sacred spot where susa-
noo-no-M ikoto alighted when expelled
from heaven for his sins.
Another nrmored ship bears the famil-
lar title Of Adsuma, the nppellntton OF q.
whole district beyond aIakone to the east
ward And was It not SO called because
OF Adsuina, faithful and famous vile
of Yamato-dakeno aiikoto? Crossing the
sea TO load his army.gthe hero vas over yer
taken by storm. In which ne would
have persisted but for the d eviction Of lis
beautiful wife. believing that the god O.
the sea had been irlcensed and would no.
be pacifled except by the. loss of some ON
life precious to Japan. she resolved n 70 70
Immediate herself In order to propitiate
the deity, and. therefore, wrapping her
body In her robe Of gold and scarlet.
plunged Into tho furious pillows and was
DROWNED. II AS she sank out OF the reach
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1904-09-04
oooooooooooooo
oooooooooo 900;

Of those who would have saved her. 4
possible. BY the surrender OF their own
lives. the sea became almost Immediately
tranquil. and yamato-dakero safely land.
Cd and defeated the enemies OF his coun.
I try. Ever since then all hose regions
have borne the name made noble by this
self-immolntlon OF the Japafese princess.
so THAI a ship Of war may also proudly
bear It. "a Il, 3, v,
Among tho twelve OF the protected"
Glass you will observe Chltose. meaning
a thousand years, word OF prosperity;
fKasagi, d spot famous IN Japanese his
tory. belonging to Yan,asbiro; Massage
Ia place much praised BY poets for Its
exquisite scenery. on the sea coast, near
gAknshi; 4 Ahitsushlnla, a nota BILE apnellaS
ton. for 1t signifies "tte dragon fly" the The
accepted badge Of the whole archipelago.
It35wiiI thus be seen, even by SO brief
d survey. that the Japanese carry ardent
love OF their own beautiful land out
Supon the element which surrounds ",
E,Ipon the flags and nameboards Of their
/ ships OF war, making the mountains, the
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1904-09-04

distinguishes them. The word for a man
iof.war. from tile superb Mikasa or Full,
is .p.Gun-Kan.' But the j apnnese drop
tho eplti,et. not saying or writing MI.
ikasa. Gun-Kan,' but only M lkasa. =
What does this signify? Simply, II is
the name /. Of "a lofty and famous noun.
tain near Nara. Il, the japanese province
OF Yamato. and means the ridge OF three
3lntss.@lts summit wearing the sf1a pc CT
the umbrella like headpieee which PHI
grims carry This mountain has been
much celebrated in native poetry, ~
verses which | need not qpote. and not ct
ably by d renowned singer, a beno Nnka-
niaro.t Take next the battleshlp Hat
ssuse. This, again, Is taken from To-
cnlity much praised by poets. near Nara.
and quite household word among the
people. III
Next comes to mind the AsnhI. That
sgnines the morning sun which lumi-
nary. is ct once an object universally
5pralsed and reyerenced In japan, as we'll
ia being the symbol and national badge
u Of the empire. It Is "Asahi. y which FIG
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1904-09-04

ures IN blazing scarlet of dawn on the
standard Of Dial Nippon. shiklshima Is
vet another synonym for the land Of the
rising sun, frequently employed III It's
poetry. I need not give much cxplana-
ton of the title bestowed on the sister
,battleship, Full Everybody knows how
central and integral q factor in Japanese
art and life is that beautiful and stately
mountain rising so proudly from the
Pacific waves which battle It's feet, and
how that lovely and wonderful peak scars is
Into the southern clouds. eternally CROWN
ed with IA gllttering diadem Of snow.
Yashima. next IN my memory, and en-. en-.
rolled on the catalogue OF the chief naval
ilinc, recalls the story, not Of a noun
tain, but Of a famous battlefield -on the
coast Of san,iko. where he great combat
tbefell between s. ieishi and Hen1i. TO re-
cite which would go. beyond my permit
ted space.
I'M the name Of Hiyci. flrst-class crl,l.
SER we come back to celebrated hills.
while another fine cruiser of the mika-
dos fleet wears the name Of Kongo
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1904-09-04

possessing naval traditions have had q
clean log book To write on. and their
choice Of names for warsllps becomes for
this reason interestlng. Japan, especially.
Which does nothing without aiming at
and utility, was sure, one
would any beforehand, to hnvc chrstened
her fghting squadrons with sagacious
recognition Of how much may lie IN a
name; nor will this general opinion be.
'galnsaid II we run over the list OF the
line Of battleships and cruisers sailing
under the standard of the lmikados and
notice how5and why their various appella-.
lions have been chosen 5 y
First Of all. u should be borne in mind
that a ship OF war and q ship OF COM.
irlercc have their owl, specia word II, the
Japanese tongue. The latter class, from
the big ocean liner q 3 the Nippon Z
Junk going round the Islands. bears the
nppellatiotl of '..Maru. This word. WHICH
lis also used Tor a sword: and for tho
white and red nag OF the empire. properly
meaning a "clrclc,, Is always tackled IN
to passenger or trading craft, and so
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1904-09-04
oooooooooooooooooocooo
BY SIR EDWIN "A Urn OLD.
oocpooooocooOooooooooooooo

3flowerys plains, the blossomlng groves,
and the sparkling streams OF Dai Nippon
points Of recollection. loyalty, and pa.
,triotisn for the sailor as well as fors the
soldier and the citizen. Broadly speak,
Ing, the big ships have been christened +
after great mountains. and their smaller
sisters from some well -kno wnI natural fea.2
,ture of the country. ~
Is It not. In "Eothen' that We have ii
delicious picture OF % drunk On al banian,
who consoles himself on a distant carr1-
.palgn BY sticking In the floor a sprlg
of blossomng myrtle and pouring round /
tia libation from his bow Of wine, af--s3i
ter which he lies happily d Town, frnag n-s
Ing that he beholds again the fragrant
groves and purling streams Of his native
land? Japanese loyalty to the emperor
and to the scarlet and white flag does
not need such aids, yet t is character
istic that even the ships Of the island I
empire testify by their names to that
passionate pride and affection which the 4
lowest subject OF the nikad o feels in his
native home. 53gs3 si l{5 TX
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1904-09-04
Spain IsGrateful.

Il Tho trouncing Uncle Sam gave Spain
some few years ago served TO quicken
the sluggish blood IS the aons a s,, l tney
siiiar ~ raports from that country ars To-
tie effect that there has been q u rst
markablo revival in business and INDUS.
try during the last Ave Years, ana M
far a. cen tury Spain needed THAI llcktng
She ought TO be thank fpl to us for ha YiinS
given til to her Savanna sSeNs
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1904-09-04

of painting which fourtshed
ouy the Of Florence and Venice pract1ea1Y
died IN
after ~
died spirit centuries
the most ge'
vol the great maateIs
who had pyeceded him. from Guido
OF color ana araWRs
he got sacchi with
art treasure ~
there for he same 9
church. restore We Wofks q III
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1904-09-04
"a Roman Senator BY Mardttf.

any other as II
Holland and Belgium
paintings Clement was
his ialne
the time executed this commission some
Ills
and he became NE
painted
called "caIlno dele haaonae
John IN Laerann DestFoylng 'he
addition 70 painting number OF sgons pc,u Mata am
and direct as portrait BY