The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1904-06-04
THE NONPAREJL MAN

call How You Gave an Grafton on "True
Courage" and Were Scared stIff-A
Dream Of the Long Ago Containing the
Illusions Of Tight Boots and a Long,
Tailed Constitutions.
Speaking Of commencement, do you re-
call now you were scared stiff and had to
give the "oration" on True Courage?"
In those days every boy wore thin boots"
brought to high state of polish and
worn tighter than an iron wise. To put
them on was misery, to wear them was
hideous and prolonged suffering, and to
take them off required bootjack, such
as the comic papers used to throw at cats,
and sometimes the assistance of third
party After they were off, they were
creased to see If they couldn't be made
to loosen up a little for the next period
Of martyrdom, but they never did
Perhaps you recall how full of BIAS
phemy and sudden death your measly little
soul was when In boots on commence
ments, Sabbaths and other state occasions. |
I shudder as recall these sinister mo-
ments. The tight boot is certainly the |
mother of crime.
Comm ncement day! It did seem very
important. indeed, and it was. You have
on your first long tailed coat, with, If you
had the nerve, a. flower on the lapel. Peo-
pie looked at you and grinned, and you
grinned back sheepishly. Gosh ding them
boots! How they did hurt! And there
were lots Of flowers around, and the girls
were all dreams in white and pink, with
red cheeks and most gloriously arranged
hair. And dare not say how many yards
| of lace were coiled on their graduating
dresses The doors and windows of the
church were all wide open, for the weather
was very hot. The air was full Of the
odor Of sachet powder, and all f1uttery
with fans and ribbons. The class colors,
we had more colors than you could get
out of a Kaleidoscope, were on everything.
| Bang, the piano lets go, and we are off,
First there is the piano duel, or was it a
duet, by the Misses Jackson and Smith
| Great! We don't quite see what the game
is, but we applaud nightly. The Misses
Jackson and Smith bow and smile, once,
| twice, and then, as the popular demand
cannot seem to be satiated, they hit it
again. This time the crowd has enough
and the exercises proceed
| Do you get weak kneed as the program
approaches your Grafton? You do, might
ly! You would freely give up IS, if you
had it, were you in some NICE comfortable
swimming hole ten miles out in the coun-
try. You have trouble in swallowing. But
| 1t has to be done; you push it thru
and come out all right, tho badly scared.
The sensation of finding yourself hollering
the familiar platitudes out over an audi
| ence is not quite as bad as 1t seemed No
one seemed to care to question your state
ments, nor did they occasion dispute after
wards.
One Of the old reliables who used to
vote the federalist ticket and who has lent
responsibility to the town for nigh on to
sixty year. hands you all out a nice little
roll of diplomas with a speech which
might have been dispensed with consider
ing how your feet hurt two more ladies
go long and earnestly with the piano and
the whole affair is called off.
Then you go home and get those boots
oft quick, or as quick as is feasible You
are graduated. And what is more to the
point you've got on some comfortable
footwear. 4,
When little Dorothys papa and mama
say things at the table which they do not
wish Little Pitchers with Big Ears to
understand they sometimes spell them out
and Little Big Ears Is mystified. The
other day when there was company at
table Dorothy sat quietly eating until
} there was a pause in the conversation
when she began, as If talking emphatical-
ly to herself:
II, e, J., g." Ii
: Mama was shocked ''For goodness
sake, Dorothy, what do you mean by
that?''
{ "why, that's what papa said when he
{ put his collar
(Explosion.)
Looks as tho we might get little rain!
Lightning struck a. pianist at Engle-
$ wood N. J.
e Kansas man who was there says that
t Fred Funston crossed by means of the
I bridge. Well, he crossed, anyhow, and
{ that is more than some Of us would have
= dared to do.
The Kansas City Times speaks of Cen
eral Kurosafetypin.
. A writer in the sporting magazine Out
: ing has an interesting account of the frs
e baseball game ever reported It was
8 played at Hoboken, N. j., in 1859. ant
: the story of the event appeared in ar
Illustrated weekly, which explained a
=, length how the game was played. One O.
!, the rules was that the base runner Nigh
&c be put out by hitting him with the ball
e 1t was considered good play on the par
) of the base-runner to draw a throw from
te the pitcher, for usually the runner would
e dodge the throw and gambol around tn,
n bases, while the felders were hurryint
n after the ball This rule was abolished a
= soon as the game became popular, for
baseman, instead Of touching a rune
with the ball, would often SOAK" him a
q. short range, which generally brought GU
IT unprintable remarks from the soakee.
For some time after this rule was abol
If ished, the game was played both ways
l. ''borings" or mo borings" being agree,
is upon before the game began. It was con
sidered great sport when runner wa
making a base to get the ball and plu
j. him good and solid in the back, thus put
/, ting him out. The writer dinly recall
i several fights started because the base
i, runner was plugged in a way that h
le considered unnecessarily harsh.
And do you recall the game of barn-tic
''Borings' were always in order in barn
tic and in three old-cat, too In scrub
they were ruled out quite early
How would you like to have real gam
of scrub with that old gang?
Going back to that game in 1859, tn
= writer before mentioned felt it necessar
er to explain to the reader the intricacies G
tie baseball. He said:
l. Baseball differs from cricket especial
1T In there being no wickets. The bat |
81 held high in the air. When the ball ha
I'd )been struck, the outs try to catch it, i
leI which case the striker Is out, or, If the
d. cannot do this, to strike the striker wit
d, 1t when he-is running, which likewise put
le him out
lie Instead Of wickets, there are in rthi
game, four or five marks called bases, on
l. Of which, being the one at which tn
1T striker stands, is called home
las at cricket, the point Of the gam
. is to make the most runs between bases
r. the party which counts the most run
sr wins the day.
at Baseball has developed some since thu