The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1904-12-31
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nothing. l lost suit here yesterday.
Elk.
He-Its hard to keep a secret some
times, isn't 1t? She-I don't know;
I've never tried it.-Detroit Free
Press.
A little boy was asked his name, and
answered: "Well, they call me jim
ME, for short; but my maiden name Is
James,"
I'm sure he said he was out Of pol
tiles for good" you must have mis-
understood him. He's out for the
goods in politics. '-Philadelph Press.
Edith-When l accepted Jack he
said he was in the seventh heaven!
Ethel-Quite likely; he's been engaged
to six other girls this season.--Jester.
Minister-So you saw some boys
fishing on the Sabbath, my young man.
Did you do anything to discourage
them7 Small Boy-Yes, sir; l stole
their bait.
Hawkins-That pickpocket they
caught is really a very intelligent fell
low. Sampson-No doubt of it. He
proved that by his ability to locate
lady's pocket.
Jaggles-Do those noblemen who
come over here to visit us acquire
many OF our customs? Waggles-I
presume so. At any rate, they borrow
great deal from us.
MY kingdom for a horsev cried
Richard the Third. And a moment
later he was seen slowly emerging
from under his balky automobile
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Mr.. Gooder-Here's a book I'd very
much like to have our daughter read.
1t contains some good advice for a girl
of her age. Mrs. Gooder-Very well.
I'll forbid her to touch it.
"a mighty poor sermonw said Knox,
as they came out of church. What
would you expect for cent? an
swered Cox, who had seen what the
kicker had dropped into the plate.
Zones borrowed a dollar from me
yesterday" yes" HE paid me back
| Will TIC 5dlDG QOildA L itahC0
That's strange" mo. l couldn't pass
1t either."-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Just Too Lovely: YES" said the
first actress, 1--WE got lovely new
play for this season" what is itY'
/, asked the other. "A society drama in
four acts and FIVE new gowns."-Ex.
kissing Bugs: He-Let US sit out
on the lawn and watch for shooting
stars. She oh, somebody might see
: us. Let's sit inside the grape arbor
= and watch for lightning bugs.-Judge
/ "Yes," said Mr.. Borem, I'm disap-
4 pointed in these shoes. It's funny now
!, adays how ones things wear out be
!. fore one knows it." YES" replied
i Miss Weary, with yawn, especially
/, ones welcome"
n Teacher-Now, then, Tommy, yor
). have no good excuse for staying away
10 from school yesterday. Tommy-Well
l. 1t wasn't my fault. Teacher
l. wasn't? Tommy-No, ma'am. dom
st my best to think up one.
n "Oh, childrenl You are no noisy to
sc day. Can't you be little stiller ant
d betterT Now, grandma, you must b.
d little considerable, and not scold us
~ You see, If it wasn't for us you woul'
u not be grandma at all"
- She-And you say you would die 70
- me? Mr.. Boresome-A thousand times
N She-Would you mind doing it JUS
once-straightaw You know pap
has been appointed coroner, and b
"a hasn't had any practice yet.-Bostol
Is Traveller.
n, Salesman-How was it you aske'
b. Grimes only $40 for that coat when tn
le usual price is SIS? Proprietor-Wel
s. you see, he had the coat charged, an
Is it is doubtful If he ever pays. Bette
B. lose $40 than SIS. don't you see?-Bos
It ton Transcript
II. The Maiden-I have a futterin
" about my heart, and l have no apps
is tite, doctor. The Doctor-Oh. your
to in love; 1 can't do anything for tina
IN "You can't, doctorT' Certainly
lie can't" "Why, doctorl You're nc
ke married. '-Yonkers Statesman.
- Burly Party-Are you aware, 81
that you deliberately placed your un
:. brella in my ear last evening? Lift
Bifferton-Very careless of me, II
- surel 1 wonder what became Of
% and Would it be too much troub
=. to ask you to return it?-Tit-Bits.
"a Jones-It is just impossible for n
- TO keep a lead pencil. People are q
- ways borrowing. you know, and the
80 always forget to return. Brown-Wh
I never have any trouble. See, II
got a whole vest pocketful of pencil
Jones-Doesn't that prove just what
iir said7
* Willie-I met our new minister {
of nv way to Sunday school. MANN
lie and he asked me II l ever played ma
Ny HES on Sunday. Mother-H'ml Al
of what did you say to that? Willie
lily said. Get thee behind me. Satanr al
lie walked right of and left him."-Lo
az don Tit-Bits.
he O'Halloran-It's sorry OF am
eet foind that yez how a ticket to the pli
Mt tonight, McGovern, for yez'll not IS
I'LL Sir Hinnery. McGovern-How do y
i'm know that7 O'Halloran-Because
ere was there last nolght. and wild me t'
nst eyes seen him die in the last act.-L'
Sc lies Weekly.
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