New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1904-01-25
THE TALK OF TIE DAY.

The ministers OF the Porte. after having decided
that Turkey should not be represented at the ST.
Louis Exposition. were Influenced 20 change their
decision when the following facts were submitted:
between New-York and Turkish ports freight rates
have been reduced from 80 Is to 81 % ton; the value
OF Turkish imports 20 tho United States has In
creased from 100000 20 ssOo,cOO year. and the
United States is buying from Turkey direct more
than 100000 year.
II hope YOU don't disgrace the league OF chaueurs
by warning people not to set run DOWN interro-
NO; use II to drown the remarks after they are
run down."-(Chicago News.
The mob besieged Baron Rothschild's house IN
Paris during the revolutionary upheavaI in 1is and
the baron begged the rinsleaders to enter. They
demanded equal distribution OF hts wealth
among all the male adults OF France. II was clear
that the safest way for Baron Rothschild was the
simplest. and the baron. working out the sum-
found that It TO much less than a franc
head. I'VE WILL however call It franc" he said.
Accept the first nstalment with my compliments.
And now gentlemen. YOU win allow me TO resume
my business" There no longer any need to be
violent. and for two shillings Rothschild bought
the good win OF an angry mob.
THE ELEVATOR MAN
The elevator mamie knows a weighty lot of
He knows the inner purposes OF statesmen and OF
He'll tell you why the weather man has missed 1t
He'll tell you why the women wear the germ sntio-
He knows the politicians and viii tell their every
II you would know q thing. 80 ask tia elevator
man.
Tho elevator man dispenses news from noor 70
And every day surprises you because he knows
He knows a ours for oil the sorts ana kinds Of
And who goes on the carpet when the Safest
Tho prim stenogEaphsEs who ride-MatiIda- Jana or
Their first names are remembered by the elevator
He knows the horses racing. and tho status Of the
At getting information he possesses quite snaek-
II there should DO ire alarm he win not leave his
But ne win tell you where It is-ths house and
block and street;
He knows the population from Beersheoa unto
He knows the dramas ms and outs-ths elevator
He knows the tenants OF the block-whsn they go
lie knows by looking at them II they walked
He knows the price of corn and wheat and how to
He knows the names and pastimes Of the top and
He's better on percentages than any baseball fan;
He knows the time. without a elock-the elevator
- man.
The people get his knowledge as they come and as
They ask the elevator man about each thing they
From the chances Of a foreign war TO leaving time
Irnconsciousiy they AL rely upon his Susy brains
The wisdom OF the world Is In his comprehensive
II you are ignorant. go ask the elevator man;
-(Chicago Tribune.
A curious incident occurred IN an English police
court recently when a named Travis was sem
fenced 70 a months imprisonment for obtaining
postal order by false pretences He pleaded that he
was Officially dead" and his story was that when
with the British army In South Africa he deserted.
obtained some clothes from the kafiirS made his
way to the coast and worked his passage home. He
then discovered that he was reported dead. and
though he subsequently gave himself up de-
serter the War ONCE gave official assurance that
he had "died at the 'front.'" and would not arrest
him.
do you think YOU could Identity the mOtOrist who
you down IL you him Ggatn?
Identity him be bloWed! His mother couldn't
Identify him II I saw him sSain!'-(Boston Globe
A young man desiring to settle in Indian Territory
wrote letter or inquiry to one OF the principal
chiefs Of the cherokee nation This was the reply:
Young man. If you will come down in the Cherokee
country I will give you $50 acres Of Grand River
land and also herd OF cattle and win also supply
you with Cherokee wife,