The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1904-04-02

ana the good anbition@:to try for its ac-
QUESTION. go
Now, when you have gone thus far
along in the theory and practice. OF good
and graceful manners you will be sure to
find that your investment Of time. and
effort, in the study Of how tp be agreeable,
is beginning to pay you really bigTdtvi-
dends. IT you are a man in business. oc-
cupied with the steady, grind Of getting
your own living, you will pretty soon be-
your improved bearing ON your work, and
in your life. Men will begin to like you
better and more readily; They will APP,
proach you more freely listen to you more
attentively, and do you faVors more glad
ly because you have learned how to set
! understand their little preferences, and
| to humor their small and harmless pref
udices. If needs please remember, the
| eye OF an expert Is needed to detect the
value Of a rough diamond. but the very
| newsboy in the street is able to appreciates
the importance and the beauty Of pol
ished one.
| Therefore, in this world and day Of
progress and competition, the most highly
| lustrous diamond always commands the
| highest price, and 1t is the man with the
best learning that receives the first hear
| ing. Exactly the same truth holds good
with regard to the woman who wishes to
succeed in her sphere, whatever that may
be. It is not beauty and 1t IS not wealth
alone that will win, fprS any healthy
minded woman the position she covets: If
she longs to be the leader in her church
work, her family life, in her club, or at
a ball. she cannot lure the admiration, the
| confidence or the social power she wants
merely by virtue Of fair face or full
pocket. We Americans are a very 1nde-
pendent and critical people;;aSair faces and
long bank accounts are not rarities among
| 11S M 6apan6 SnrnetfffYo al In
favorites. '~~~~
| Above all things, We demand to be
won by charm and sweetness Of manner,
and We are just independent enough to
give all our admiration at the shrine of
the woman who, without beauty and with
out wealth and without fame for her in
tellectual attainments. is still loved for
her lovely manners.
I stand ready to bring forward any
amount Of actual and 1rrefutable evidence
to prove that there are many such women
and that with them agreeability is an art,
which they have studied with much devo-
ton, and which they have learned to use
thru the exercise Of. care and steady
practice.
l. Therefore I do most unhesitatingly
maintain that charm Is the result Of eff
fort expended In the right direction.
also maintain in consequence that it is
your fault or my fault If we are not gen.
uine favorites in that society. domestic
religious or fashionable. in which we are
called upon to move.
Social Culture la Soul Culture.
Twenty years ago I would never have
dared make such q statement. SO short
} a time ago there were no such opportun-
tiles open to the aspirant after instruction
: in good manners as are now offered. But
nowadays we take our studies In socia
self couture seriously, for we have learned
how essential they are, and that socia
culture leads directly to soul culture.
have tried in all my authorship on the
topic Of the art Of being agreeable tt
make this clear. The man or woman who
, desires for practical reasons. even fol
pure vanity's sake, to be charming, Is
, bound to be considerable, to think Of 9th
ers quite as much as himself and to b.
: ready to serve others.
+ AS you study the art OF being agree
, able, you study the habit of showing your
t self less self-centered, less aggressive, AM
, in short less selfish every day. For th
reason then, as we'll for all the world,
> reasons- L believe most heartily that thu
art Of being agreeable is, take it all /,
2 all, the highest and most important ar
! Of them all. -Adelafde Gordon.