davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

The only son had just announced to
the family his engagement
Mommer-What, that girl? Why,
she squints-
Sister She has absolutely no style.
Observation-Disclosures amt she2
Grandma=I'm Altered she's Eighty.
JTncle-She hasn't any money
First Cousin Jim-She doesn't look
strong.
Second Cousin Jane-She's stuck
up.
Third Cousin Jezebel-She's an ex-
travagant thing
The Son Cthoughtfully)-W she's
got one redeeming feature, anyhow.
Chorus-What's that2
The Son-She hasn't a relative on
earth.
Popper-Grab her. my boy, grab
her.-Pittsburg Post.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11
POINTED PARAGRAPHs.
[From the Chicago News. ]


Those who don't pay their money
often take their choice.
Love at first sight supplies a lot of
work for divorce judges.
The moth hasn't much use for a man
who has but one suit of clothes.
Real estate dealers wax fat at the
expense of people who want the earth.
Time waits for no man. but men
waste a lot of time waiting for wo-
men.
The average man seems to think it
his duty to help the Lord punish sin
ners.
Occasionally men die of thirst. but
more often they drink themselves to
death.
Never tell a girl you love the ground
she walks on unless she owns the real
estate.
Usually after marrying an earthly
angel man kicks himself because he
didn't marry a cook.
Any man who can hold baby for
an hour without saying naughty words
is in the same class with job
T7yve4-vhodx ~ao Ne 4Ae C+a+1 r.,--..4
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11
GRAY Kennedy TO LEAVE.
Has Been Made Secretary of junction
City Street Car Company.

T. G. Kennedy, who was for eight years
secretary of the city railway prior to the
recent change in Ownership. has been
elected secretary of the Junction City
Street Car, Ice and Electric Light COM
pany and will leave Topeka to take this
position on June ]. The Junction City
company operates the fine electric line
recently built between Junction City and
Fort Riley and also controls the ice and
electric light business at both points The
Junction City railway is one of the best
equipped lines in the state It operates
cars larger in size than those in Topeka
Mrs Mary D. Kennedy, who is in
charge of the postoffice substatiOn 3 at
Washburn college. will continue to live in
Topeka and remain in charge of the sub
station.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

noon hour we were kind to the horse. and.
taking every bit of harness from him. al
lowed him to eat his lunch in comfort
while we munched some sandwiches.
Well, IL was all right until we started
to put the harness on again. Then the dis
covery was made that neither of US was
able to do the trick. We were stuck. but
by doing a great deal of thinking we man
aged to get all the harness in place except
the bit We tried to put that in the
horses mouth, but the animal wouldn't
open his mouth for "a cent.
:" Well said my companion. wen simp-
" have to wait. that's all
- Wait for WhatY asked in surprise.
' Why was the reply. wen have to
wait until the horse yawns.' "-Philadel-
phia Press.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11
DEATHS AND FUNERALS.

The funeral of Edwin d. Waggoner. son
of Frank L. Waggoner, will be held to-
morrow morning at 10 O'Clock from the
home at 1912 Fillmore street
The funeral OF Mrs. J. A. Stoner was
held from Lowman Hill chapel at 3 o'clock
etery-
Peter Elliott. aged 70 years. a brother
of John Elliott. died at noon today at the
resi- Sence of the latter, 915 Topeka ave-
nue.. where he has made his home for
many years. The cause OF his death is
attributed to a cOmplicati ton Of diseases.
He left no family and was unmarried. He
was an old soldier. Funeral arrangements
will be made later
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11
Her Papa,s CIeverness.

Robert b. Mantell who is starring in
1.-The Light of Other Days" and Bill
Nye were great friends. When the
humorist first engaged in newspaper
work he took a house on Staten Island.
and one day Mr.. Mantell went to din
ner with him. Nye exploded some new
stories, and Mr. Mantell. turning to his
hosts little girl, said: Very clever pa
pa. you've got. my dear" Yes" ls-
sponded the demure little miss; ''when
there's company. New Orleans Times
Democrat.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11
Psychic Moment.

Said the man with the cane:
II took a trip out into the country with
a friend of mine the other day and We
had a great time and hearty laugh
I've been living in the city all my life,
and. of course, 1 didn't know how to har-
ness horse.
What has that to do with the trip in
the country Just this: Ny friend and I
went up to DoylestOwn, and as the day
was bright and balmy. we thought we
like a carriage ride. So We hired a horse
and buggy and drove into the country
among the Bucks county hills. At the
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

Admiral Togo is criticised because he
didn't sail in Port Arthur harbor and
smash the Russian fleet. If he had
made the attempt, probably the cham
mel would now be blocked with sunken
Japanese war ships instead of with
merchant vessels.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

A Rock Island freight train con-
sistina of fifteen cars of lard was
wrecked at o'clock Tuesday after
noon at a point about one mile south
Of Hoyt, Kas- A defective rail was
the cause Three negroes who were
known to have been some place on
the train at the time of the accident
are missing. The wrecking crew was
sent out from Topeka and the line is
clear today.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

King of Marion. Dever concluded not to
fight Judge Moore any further.
Judge Moore was represented by F. 5.
Roark of Junction City and he himself
came to Topeka Tuesday afternoon 20
look after the matter. Judge Moore OBJ
jected to the postponement of the contest.
but Mr.. Wheeler requested that it be put
off. and The board Consented.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11
ON A SHIP.
Big Engagement of Gold for Thurs
days Steamer to Europe.

New York May 1.-Heidelback.
IckIeheimer & Co. will ship $1,000, 900
on Thursday.
Later in the day the engagement of
So 100000 gold by the National City
bank raised the total of the days ship
ments to $500, 600.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

Ralph Faxon. secretary to Senator
Long. reached Topeka today on his
way home from washington. He saws
Senator Lcng probably reached Chi
cago today, and it may be a week be-
fore he arrives IN Kansas. as he ex-
poets to make one or two other stops
on the way.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11
LOCAL MENTION.

Mr.. and Mrs. John Mars of Perry. o.
T., are stopping for few days with
Mr.. and Mrs II. L. Strohm OF 1929
Western avenue.
Mr.. and Mrs. John Bowden OF
Eskridge. Kan. are in the city trans
acting business.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

Omaha Bee:a Coal miners combina-
tions viii not be popular in Kansas
since it has been decided by the su-
preme court that combiners may be
sent to Jail for failure to testify in
court
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

The ground hog has come out again
at last. He is reported to have bitten
a man in Kentucky last week. No
wonder he was hungry.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

Complaint is being made that Mr..
Hearst is trying to buy a nomination.
But isn't that method better than
stealing it?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

1t is reported that Olney was put
forwad in Massachusetts for the pur-
pose of securing delegates for Parker
For whom is Parker trying to obtain
deIegates2
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

The big national conventions are now
less than so days off and many states
are yet to be heard from on one side
or the other.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

A New York man who inherited 81
600 900 seven years ago is now broke.
Doubtless, he could give Carnegie some
valuable pointers.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

It looks now as though. when Car
negie's peace building is comples7d
there will be nothing to put in it.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

The Russians appear to make better
use Of their legs than their arms.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

The Republicans in Louisiana are in
a row over the choice of delegates to
the Chicago convention, just the same
as though there were two candidates
in the field and a barrel on tap.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

Russia appears to be finding the ''yel-
low peril the real thing.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

The war in Manchuria has not yet
reached the armored train stage.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

Theodore Roosevelt is now president
of the United States and king of the
canal zone.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

Itching hemorrhoids were the
plague Of my life. Was almost wild.
Doan's Ointment cured me quickly
and permanently. after doctors had
failed" G. r. Cornwell. Valley street
5auEerties- N. 7.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

Well said the rural man as a chatting
dish was brought to the couple at the
next table. such prices and have to cook
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

THE seasons coming on now when lots
of political lies will be nailed
Yes and lots Of thumbs will be mashed
in the process. too. f'-Phfladelphia Press
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

lately"
"Eh? What states does he expect to
carry 2''-Cleveland Plain Dealer
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

How did they get into society,"
"Oh. they We're arrested three times
one Sunday for running their automobiles
too fast. Chicago Record-derald.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

Yes said the friend of the family.
they were married in haste
And repented at leisure, eh2' Queried
the other.
''Oh. no. was the reply, they repented
in haste, also. Chicago Daily News
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

Its easy to pick the horse that ought
Yes The thing that requires intelu-
gence and dfscernment is to keep from
betting on him Was hlngton star
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

Mrs. Houskeep-'Delia. I don't want
you to be entertaining that policeman
in the kitchen any more" Delia-'sBur
Miss Edith is in the parlor most av
the tonne, ma'am. an OF don't think
Mr.. O'Flynn would enJy her society
her bein' strange to him. ''-Phila-
delphia Press.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11
GOOD CORNER PROPERTY SOLD,
Building Occupied by Implement
Firm Goes Under Hammer

This morning. Sheriff Lucas sold at pub
lie sale from the court house steps the
prOperty on East Sixth avenue occupied
bv the Warner & Potter implement store.
The property was bought in by the Ports
mouth Savings bank OF Portsmouth, n
H which holds a Judgment against Geo
w Veale and others amounting to $3lVyo
The property was bought in for $4,000
Oklahoma City and Return $1O.O5 via
Santa Fe.
Account U. c. T. Tickets on sale
May Il and 10. Final limit returning
May 16.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

Naggsby - Was Braggsby surprised
when he was nominated for the governor-
ship
Waggsby-Surprised I should saw so
Why, he was so taken aback that he al
most forgot the speech Of acceptance he
had prepared in advance.-Baltirnor
American.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

Everybody reads the state Journal
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1904-05-11

ell LEASED WIRE REPORT
or TEE ASSOCIATED PRESS
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-08-28
MURPHY'S DILEMMA
SCHOOL BOARD TAKES NOTICE OF
 HIS CANDIDACY.
Negro Applicant for White Mans Place fs Principal of Negro School mt Eufaula and Subject
 tO Board.

S. M. Murphy. the principal of the Eufaula school for negroes. who has been an applicant for the position in United States Marshal l.. J. Bryan's office. made vacant by the resignation of Byron Trammell. postmaster at De- than. may withdraw from the race.
 Immediately after the resignation of MT. Trammell. Murphy's name was prominently mentioned for the position. It Is said that his appointment was looked on with favor by Charles H |. Scott one of the Presidents referees of Alabama patronage.
 Murphy Is a negro and is the prin- cipal of the Eufaula school for ne- groes. For ten successive terms he has been elected to that position. During the last term there were complaints against him by the negro patrons of the school. The matter was taken up by the Eufaula Board of Education, who upheld Murphy.
 But 1t Is prominently rumored that the members of the Board of Educa- ton of Eufaula do not relish the idea of Murphy's applying for a position all ways held by a white man. It Is also rumored that Murphy has been given to understand that he must either de- sist his political ambitions or step down and out from the Eufaula school.
 It was a matter of speculation much argued upon in the Government Build ing yesterday as to whether Murphy would continue in the race.
 In the meantime no appointment has been announced.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-08-28
Death Of Col. Daniel Roone.

Ohio State Journal, Sept. 24, 1918.
 As he lived so he died with his gun in his hand We are informed by a gentleman direct from Boone's settle. ment on the Missouri, that early in last month Col. Boone rode to the deer lick. and seated himself within a blind raised to conceal him from the game ; that while sitting thus cncealed with his old, trusty rifle in his hands point ed toward the lick, the muzzle resting on leg. his face to the breech of his gun. his rifle cooked. his finger on the trigger. one eye shut, the other lock- ing along the barrel through the sights-in this position without a struggle or motion, and. of course. without pain, he breathed out his last so gently that when he was found next day by his friends, although stiff and old, he looked as If alive, with his gun in hand, just in the act of firing. It Is not altogether certain if a buck had come into range of his gun, which had been the death of thousands. but 1t might have obeyed its old employers s mind and discharged Itself. This hypothesis, being novel. we leave to the solution of the curious.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-08-28
Temcherm PaaaeN.


 Tn following teachers have been passed by the State Board of Educa- ton.
 Lauderdale County:-Jno. L. Austin. Threet; o. c. Crow, Waterloo; Lila M. Hipp, Smithsonian; c. B. Wheeler Rock ford; Malissa Bassham. Lexington; George A. Lyles. Wayland Springs, Tenn; Robert Hudson. Rogersville; Mo. G. Ingrum. Rogersville; Rosalie Ingrum. Rogersville; R, w. Sides. Flor ence; Tillie M. Benham, Florence; AL ta Shelton. Florence; Olive L. Benham, Florence. Lena Roberts. Florence; IT, wing L. Warmer. Florence, Laura Hunt, Florence; Josie Milner, Florence; Elm ma Scott. Florence.
 Cullman County:-Oscar Vance. Jones Chapel; Wm. IT. Shaw. Bashams J. L. Thomas. Hanceville; Lucy Brind- ley. Cullman; Callie Brown, Falkville; Charlie H. Seibert. Hanceville; w. O. Lloyd, Baileyton; Matte A. Wallace, Cullman: Maud Walker. East Lake; Flossie Vance. Jones Chapel; Mattie Huckaba. Hartselle; Magdalen Schei- terle. Cullman; D. II. Hammer. Heli- con: G. S. Gravlee. Horse Creek; B. G. Parker. Florette; Annie o. King, Gull man; Lizzie Kleibacker. cullman.
 Marion County:-David W. Dickson, Winfield; Marilla Mckenzie. Bexar: Lona Caddell. Glen Allen: Mintie White. Hamilton: Walter L. Mckenzie, Detroit; Cora W. Murray, Detroit: AL pha Donaldson. Lewis Hill: John P Williams. Hamilton; Ben c. CantreIl. Bexar; Cleveland Crane, Hamilton: Alice Florence Underwood. Yale, Miss {; John P. Middleton, Northington: Phoebe Greet, Smithville, Miss. James M Weaver Rara Avis Miss; Willie D. Burch Clay, Miss; William W. Friday, Rara Avis. Miss; James A. Sanger Hayleys- vile; Emmons Shotts. Shottsville; Do- ra Little. Fremont. Miss;
 Colored applicants-Clay McFadden, Bexar.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-08-28
MAJOR JONES'S DEATH
POPULAR OFFICIAL DEAD AFTER
 BRIEF ILLNESS.
For FYfty-six Years, His Entire Life, He Was . Resident of Montgom. cry County-Had Many
 Friends. -.

Major George Jones, deputy sheriff of Montgomery County and member of the County Democratic Executive Committee, died at 4:30 o'clock yester- day vaorning at the county jail after a brief illness.
 One week ago. Major Jones was in apparently the best of health. Of robust form and sunny disposition. he was the last man to be thought of as dead in a weeks time.
 On Tuesday morning Major Jones was aroused by his room mate. Deputy Sheriff N. N Waller. He arose and prepared to dress. when he suddenly lurched forward and had 1t not been for the timely assistance of MT. Waller would have fallen to the floor.
 He was placed on his bed and phy- sician was hurriedly summoned.
 On examination 1t developed that the entire right side of the patient was paralyzed. He never regained perfect consciousness. For four days he fingered between life and death, finally expiring in the early hours of yester- day morning.
 Little hope was ever entertained for his ultimate recovery. His two broth- CTS, Messrs William Jones and David Jones were summoned to his bedside Hundreds of friends visited the jail during Major Jones's illness to enquire as to his condition.
 The deceased was born near Oak Grove, Montgomery County, fifty-six years ago. He was a continuous resident of the county having con- siderable farming interests.
 At the outset of Sheriff w. R. Wal lers present term of office he was ap- pointed a deputy sheriff.
 No one who had business in the courts of Montgomery could but seriously lament the death of Major Jones. Polite. affable. cherry and un- assuming he drew close to him all with whom he came in contact
 Especially is this true of the news paper men, who daily came within his kindly sphere. There was no favor too small or too large for him to do them and it was not for self advance ment. He only wanted to help them in their work.
 The deceased was never married He leaves. besides his two brothers. a large family connection and host of friends
 He was many times member of the County Democratic Executive Commit tee and was always a strong party man, though he never sought office.
 His remains were taken yesterday afternoon to Oak Grove They were accompanied by his brothers, and Messrs P. M. McLemore. Boiling C.. Young. and George M. Powell of the sheriffs office.
 The funeral services will take place this morning at II o'clock at the family home at Oak Grove. The in torment will be in the family burying ground.
 Sheriff Waller and his deputies will attend the funeral, leaving Montgom- cry by rail at o'clock Many other friends expect to attend.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-08-28
A COMIC SUPPLEMENT
ADVERTISER WILL BEGIN PUB-
 LISHING ONE SUNDAY.
Prises of 100 Sets of Bright Col0reo Paints Are Onered Children for Best Album of
 Pictures.

The Advertiser will on Sunday. Sep tember 4, begin to publish a comic supplement, which will appear weekly in The Sunday Advertiser.
 The management of The Advertiser has recognized the growing popularity of a Sunday Comic Supplement-. Time was when a newspaper catered to none but the men of the field covered bysit. Its entire space was devoted to editorials and the most important mat ters of news that developed through the day.
 But the modern newspaper caters to every member of the family. An up to date newspaper does not content itself in furnishing the weighty poli- tical editorial and news service of in- terest to the head of a family. It publishes the news that Is of interest to the housewife. to the young man of the family and to the children.
 Now nothing is as popular with chill dren as the comic pages of Q Sunday newspaper. The names of Happy HooIigan." Lady BountifuI" and Handy Andy" are as familiar to the minds of the average American child as is the name of the father of It's country. And the older members of a family in addition to the enjoyment 1t affords, the children enjoy a clever comic picture by 0 clever artist and o plethora of good jokes.
 The Advertisers Comic Suppliment will be replete in every sense of the word. It will consist of four pages. done in a number of colors, full of good jokes and clever pictures.
 In addition to this, The Advertiser offers a reward of 100 sets of bright colored paints for the children, making the best albums of its Comic Colored Supplement. The contest will begin September and will closs on Decem- Der Is in order that the children may receive their prizes before Christmas. The box of colored paints will be &C., companied by a brush and a drawing book, and will prove a profitable source of amusement for the children during the winter months.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-08-28
The HrfdaI Veil.

The Orientals claim that the bridal veil is a survival of the eastern canopy held over the pair on their way to church. This practice still survives in oriental countries. The veil typifies ex- elusive possession by one man.
 In the days of the primitive Britons the bride wore no veil, but her abun- dant locks fell about her shoulders Even as late as the reign of Henry VIII. brides wore their hair in this simple fashion. The silken locks of Anne Boleyn floated about her on the day of her i'll starred nuptials with the king of many wives.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-08-28
SCIENTIFIC MISCELLANY
NOVEL PRODUCTION OF OXYGEN
 CATERPILLAR FARMING
An Elusive FOrce-A Mystery of Daily Life-Rust-Preventin Wrappers- Length of ROOts-RadIum-En ergized WOOl-The Water
 Instinct-SOapstOne
 FIbers.

One of the new methods of producing oxygen consists in distilling liquifed air the different boiling points of the oxygen and nitrogen making 1t com paratively easy to separate the two gases. The curious property of con densing gases that charcoal possesses has suggested to Dr. James Dewar an even simpler process, and he finds that cheap oxygen may be had by making the charcoal absorb air at a low tenn perature and then expelling the oxygen by slowly raising the temperature. At 165 degrees C. below zero-20 degrees above the 1iquefytng point of air-the charcoal becomes saturated with air in ten minutes, storing up six liters for every fifty grammes. On gently heat
 ing the first liter of gas given off con tains IS per cent. of oxygen, the sec
 ond 80 per cent, the third 53 per cent,
The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-08-28
Little Child nend.

The funeral of Paul Roeder, the f. year-old son of Mir. and Mrs. Paul Roeder, who died at the home of his parents. 204 North Jackson Street, at ? o'clock yesterday afternoon, will take place at o'clock this afternoon from the residence.
 The death of the little fellow came as great shock to his parents and they have the sympathy of a large circle of friends in their sorrow. The child was sick only a short time, and 1t was not generally known that he was seriously Ill. He was bright It, tie fellow and the idol of the house. hold.
 Interment will be made in Oakwood Cemetery