The Montgomery advertiser., 1904-03-13
What is It--vbas are you going to

M M Y. hat ia it--what are you going <
 The deacon didn't answer. He wanted ~ nts breath for what was about Y nappen He grlpped the club and maos Lor me oxen, and for ten minutes theis was circus in town with free aaniis' slan. Ne pounded and swatted ana pat tea and as the club rose and fell ne brought out a reserve stock of the Eils- .,s nsn lansuage to take the cake over any. enin8 Farmer Johnson had ever tnouSA. o1. when he was so utterly exnausteu mat ne could neither strike nor tax turner without a rest he found tiie widow Harris beside him and saying:
 Deacon Shortweil. I wouldn't a-beiicy- ca t. not if the minister had told ire SO himself"
 don't care a durn whether you would or noti' he hoarsely replied.
 oh. you don't. eh? Well, you've let tne cat out of the bag at last. beacon you are cruei-hearted man, and you swear like a pirate. can never, never marry such man
 Nobody has asked you to. Durn their hides, but I'd like to murder em!'
 More cruelty! More cussing! l thought there might be something hid. gen undsr that soft, sleek way of yours. oxen amt exactly women, and who vii cuss and pound his oxen will naturaily-
 ieobe you'd like to try 'em yourself interrupted the deacon as a brilliant thought came to h.mi
 would. I have never driven oxen in my life but l know can do better'n you Gimme the gad. Now, then, haw Buck-gee Bright. See there! As soon as they Ind out that nobody Is going to break their ribs or cuss them blind they are as dociIe as cats. You hold the plow and I'll drive.s'
 Five minutes later the furrow had been extended four feet more, and the blow point was getting ready to rip up the soil in the good old way when the oxen rourished their tails and bolted. The deacon went whirling at the first twist of the blow. but the widow was game, and she raced along with the bolters and put the whip over their noses. She might possibly have stopped them De- lore they got over the county line out for an accident. Oxen and woman struck and overturned beehive in their mad career. and the l0.0OO bees loafing around eaine up to the scratch in the promptest and most cheerful manner. The, deacon witnessed the beginning of the scrap, and even waited until stray bee had lifted his heels off the ground for hu- manitys sake, but then he fled, and it was two days later that he knew that the widow had 61 Jumps on her body and was doing as we'll as could be ex- pected. and that the oxen had been heard of forty miles away, and still on the run.
 Deacon" began the widow. as Ne made his appearance in response to her message. '.I believe you cussed them oxen the other day
 "I-I guess did, he rather sheepish:y replied.
 But It was for yourself. Deacon. I now wish you to cuss 'em for me. You also clubhed 'em until you was tired out. Can't you club 'em some more?''
 And you ain't--ain't mad at me?" Iie asked. as look of relief came to his face.
 La, no-fiot a mIte.'
 And ain't cruel-hearted nor a hyp- ocrite and a pirate?''
 No, deacon. On the contrary, you ase one of the best men on earth. or will be after you have bought them oxen and peeled their pesky hides off,
 And about-about--?' stammered the deacon. as the spnburn deepened on his face and he hitehed around as if he sat on splinters
 About our getting married? Well, Samuel, you can fix the date to suit your self. and I will he there I can't get up to eat supper with you on account of tpgAe sixty-one Jumps and bumps and z ings, but I've, told the girl to make
 f{$cuit and put on that clover honey sss4the comb and you jest help yoursel. and feel right, to home"