davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1904-09-05

A Republican in Salt Lake is can
didate for one Of the legislative nOml-
nations. He las declared in favor OF
ownership Of postOffices. He
is also in favor Of making every Utah
city a port of entry. Undoubtedly the
gentleman, If elected, will have enough
influence in the legislature to secure
the passage of a law which win bring
about these much needed reforms.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1904-09-05
Bright Prospects.


The traveller approached Raisouli as to
his future.
And are you always going TO roam
barbarDus M0roccoE' was asked.
.Oh. no." replied the brigand suavely.
Il have made such success at demand
ing money that l shall soon go 70 Amer
lea and organize a trust"
Thus assured that he had the making
of real promoter in him. the traveller
gave him copy of the New Jersey laws.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1904-09-05

A chief quartermaster who turned
nearly $500, 600 of a fund in his hands
back into the treasury has been re-
buked for his economy and VIII be
given other duty. He certainly has no
business in The army under a Repub-
Tican administration.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1904-09-05
Reflections of a Bachelor.
CNew York Press.)

Even when it's harder to be bad than
good there IS more fun IN H.
A man considers himself a genius when
he writes poetry that he can't sell for
money.
There IS nothing Ike the way widow
can learn things again as quick as she
gets married.
After a man has run tor office once.
when you shake hands with him nc holds
one OF his over his watch pocket
It's Just as wen to let a woman have
her fun say in an argument or she will
wake you up IN the middle Of the night
10 tell you another reason she has Just
thought Of.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1904-09-05

A Missouri orator declares that If
Mckinley had lived Fairbanks would
have been the Republican nominee for
president This gentle intimation that
the president has used his position IN
order TO secure the nomination VIII
not be relished at oyster Bay.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1904-09-05

The only regret that win be caused
by the announcement that the San
Pedro railway viii surely be COM
pleted and in operation by Jan. l, viii
be felt among the undesirable class OF
anvilites who would have been glad CT
an opportunity to say II told you So"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1904-09-05

Wonder If statistieian Wright has IN
cluded radium in his list OF Hecessa-
ries that have been lowered in price
in 1904. 1t would help his average
considerably if he would include IL
Radium has dropped million dollars
a pound since Jan. /.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1904-09-05

A Republican contemporary inti-
mates that Judge Parker viii find the
water very cailly before the campaign
is over Well, he'll run fast enough,
or swim fast enough. to keep long
way AHEAD Of a cold.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1904-09-05
He Knew.
S @A-~S w.
cleveland Plain Dealer

Squeezem is a mean man"
What makes you think sou
Il saw him put Head quarter in
BLIND mans hat this nornilk.r,
How DO you know II was ledd2"
u passed 1t on him yesterday"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1904-09-05
TIE SALT LAKE HERALD
Published Every Day In the Year
BY THE HERALD COMPANY
Terms Of aunsorIutIon;

terms OF Subscription:
DAILY AND SUNDAY-One month. Is
cents, three montns. $50; one year, 510.OO.
SCNpAf-One year. 500.
oEadt W EEkisY-lIn advaacel, one
year, a.6o; six months, &c.
Eastern offices, W. J. Morton In
Snar5e-lO Nassau st., New York: "a
washington st.. Chicago
'--@--->~>-7~r~~~~-o-~-~~
Subscribers wishing address OF paper
changed must give former as well a.
present address.
AL papers are continued until explicit
order is received to discontinue. AL ar
Fesrasss must be paid in every case
~o-~>~~~o-~-~--~~~0o~~-~
The Herald can be obtained at these
places:
New Tork-waidorf-A Astoria; Imperial.
Boston-Y oung's hotel.
Shicago-Ths Auditorium; Palmer
House
Kansas City-Coates House.
.Omaha-Miliard Hotel; Globe News Co..
Aeseath Stationery Co.
Denver-Brown Palace; Hamilton ~
Aendr!ck; Pratt Book Store.
san F'rancisco-Palace Hotel; N. wheat
hey News Depot
portland. Ore.-Portland Hotel
Los Angeles-Oliver & Haines.
A1innea polfs--West Hotel.
~ Lonis-The Planters: The Southern
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1904-09-05

Eastern offices, W. J. Morton in
SSh1arae-l5o Nassau St., New York; 81
washington st., Chicago.
The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1904-11-17
Capital and Labor

Sitting in the Waldorf cafe, we were
discussing some deep problems OF the
day, trying to photograph them, as it
we're. on the brain. The question OF
capital and labor came UP.
Can you tell me. Colonel, what is
the difference between capital and Ia
bor?" was asked Of retired officer OF
the engineer corps, U. S. A.
II fiatter myself that can, sir said
the Colonel. Some time before my
old and very dear friend, William H.
Vanderbilt, died. he was run down by
an unruly team at Fleetwood park. His
injuries did not amount to scratch,
sir, but they caused a panic in Wall
street, and the newspapers published
from two to four columns about it.
At the same instant brick mason
fell from the top of a wall he was
building and broke his neck. One
twentieth of a column answered for
him. That. sir. is the difference be-
tween capital and labor. Exchange.
The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1904-11-17
Eligible to the Presidency

To the Editor of the Sentinel:
Is a man born of American parents
while they were visiting a foreign
country eligible to the presidency OF
the United States? SUBSCRIBER.
Milwaukee, Oct. 20.
The constitution of the United States
provides that no person except a nat
ural born citizen or citizen OF the
United States at the time OF its adop-
ton shall be eligible to the office of
president, and that no person shall oe
eligible to that Office who shall not
The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1904-11-17

He Issues an Address to the Peo-
pie of Nebraska-Still Believes
That O Pass Is a Bride

The returns indicate that the entire
republican ticket has been elected.
While the returns are yet incomplete,
the indications are that Roosevelt has
plurality of about 10000, while Gov
ernor Mickey, according to republican
claims, will receive majority of less
than 10000 This shows that larger
Independent vote was cast in last Tues
day than ever before in the history OF
the. state in a presidential year. Such
a record augurs we'll for the future.
The nomination for governor on
August 10 gave me an opportunity to
wage battle for better government in
this state. If popular government
means anything, it means that the
people shall rule. Living in this CAPT.
tai city of the state for fourteen years
l have observed how the people have
been trifed with; how extravaganza
has characterized nearly every depart
ment of the state government; how
an army of Office holders is maintained
that the state does not need, but whose
salaries the taxpayers have to pay;
how corruption has stalked in our leg
islative halls; how the free pass sys-
tenn has bribed the peoples represen-
tatives; : how railroad influence has
dominated lie affairs of the state; how
the producers of the state have re-
ceived nearly $4,000 less for their
products annually than they should
have received because of extortionate
freight rates, how additional taxes are
all atsf6 ki1ae heaped upon the people
and how corporations have grad az u ],
escaped their just share. | have said
that all this, if permitted to continue
much longer, will destroy represents
tive government. I have said many
times If | ever got chance I would
strike death blow at these evils and
abuses in our state government.
The people of this state gave me a
chance when they nominated me fOl
governor, and from the day was rom
mated until the polls closed on election
day tried as best knew how to wage
a fight for better government and for a
The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1904-11-17
To Kill off Parker

Editor independent: 1t looks as II
If would be difficult for the democratic
party to ever recover from the terrible
Jolt it has received in this election.
Much is being said about what will be
done and | notice this morning that II
is stated that Ferris is to call. All
can say is that hope due considera-
lion will be given before any scneme
IS -ia.sss5 -.
The full vote for presffcss=snd COWS
ernor is published this morning Of the
vote taken in this state. The aggre-
gate vote for president is 5,O3l less
than in 1900. The aggregate vote for
governor is less than the vote for pres
ident by $3.50. Kern for governor
poIled 592 more votes thar Parker.
Parker polled 35,441 less votes than
BRYAN. Roosevelt polled 3O,41O more
votes than Mckinley. Plurality for
Roosevelt 92,330. Hanley's plurality
over Kern 82.416. To me these fg-
ures are interesting. We have not yet
received the vote polled by the other
parties. So far as l have yet had In
formation it would appear that most
of the populists and silver republicans
were intent on killing off Parker and
voted for Roosevelt. We can tell bet
ter when we know the whole vote
FLAVIUS J. VANVORHIS.
Indianapolis, Ind.
The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1904-11-17

have attained to the age Of 1ilhy-hve
years and been fourteen yea n resi-
dent within the United Stat ~ Now,
ii is evident from the wordi1 NJ this
section that The possibility OF hN birth
Of ar American citizen while hll par
ents were without the jurisd ktpn OF
the United States, or his To ftres3r
residence in another country edn~
catiOnal or other purpOs WA
thought OF, otherwise the ST hti0n
of fourteen years residend ould
hardly have been inserted
The naturalization act of M 10,
1890. declares that tine chile Of
citizens of the United States thu nay
be born beyond the seas or out the
limits of the United States sh& be
held as natural born citizens: pro- [e1s
that the right Of citizenship shall 3ot
descend to persons whose fathers we
never been resident In the UNA
States" This is an authoritative 81 III
ment of the meaning attached to "a
words natural born" by the frame
of the constitution. A similar clau44
appeared in subsequent naturalizatip
acts until that of 1902. in which tn
modifying word "nasural born u
d ;ssss.sttaa in.s speaking Of citizens h4r9
abroad $500 ssssss s'ssssss.s,tk
Under the law Of 1856 1t IL declared
that all persons born outside the linn
it's and jurisdiction OF the United
States whose fathers are at the time
of their birth citizens thereof, are cit
liens of the United tates.-Milwaukee
Sentinel
Der Deutsche correspondent. [volume] (Baltimore, Md.) 1841-1918, 1904-03-13

sc %adiou-@ cbdu0c mGr Die Nriubr
OcSboIb Dorbci.
3iOlld)cn 0rei uu0 bier Itbr imiru.
e lo9or cine Belt lana, ais Oh Die
tlcltcrpchr Der Tldnuael1 iii0liA Don
Der &oltimoreltrnBc bel ncr 5nno
tcrlIruBc Ncrr mcrScTf mitr6c. icic
5traBc Ill icbr brett, liu0 Sic Smmt
modlt Der H6idum0nm0aitur ,rltr0e
hler c%on3cntrirt. Us mar 9Th St1mpi
chi "rbcu un0 [on. Mobi lDiiicnO,
Our bier 0ic lcbtc @clc1cnhcit mar,
Die St0Ot nor Dem llntcrQmuc np
lcttcll, ltrcnNte ic0c9 nloipinucuc
4iiitgliro Der IcllcnmabG obidUn cr-
l0op,t, pcrmun0ct mo 0nrdl Ruud
ltn0 @Ibc BATH crbtil0et lco0l @tcru
az. 9tabc}u cine Stutoe 1ieiten liz
Die NlQnmcn in SdbNhu lmo c3
'Hicrl, OILS ob Die brnpclg Qentc 0cn
1lcN oopor troacu leqtcMa }tber ser
tildtldc Gcjn0 Der &CtarIpcpr lll6
Nuni0e2gcUoMe Der. TlduWrij Der
9SinO, ncidcr. iGour bci'nt 9tl,96ruG)
of3 Wrdl0c5 oll5 a0eHJ Sii0Deltcu
liGrf acmcbt boitc, foiR 0en1loumcu
lett I'll @illir mo biiev all2. poltcu
&adcu. Naitjnorc'9 @aidiataluur
leBt b|cIjc8clt, 4iet M0npAegitroBc
iuor ~ilbtrlpuulaen lB6 pflt rr0lru0cy
Gle 6ronAcH bic &tnpMsil6hI 0ilij
der .MlC)tllliQ nurnudrt5!.. Is alluirAr
Der Deutsche correspondent. [volume] (Baltimore, Md.) 1841-1918, 1904-03-13

lIno @lIlloertt0ltienoe lp6ren oboad.
los, luabrello in Dem tbotiGhlid,
eln0eolhcrtefr 0iitfift MIR Sic alien
Norrcecl nl Der VrattitraBc lm0
Gic NCrttaltlogcn Don 9lnno Jobat
Gcrcltct iuorocn m0ren: lrt0 6ic 0rci
@folItilclttolbdutelt: Ser ,{ltiti}pa
lot oo2 Roltontt un0 0as Nutbbnla
ltorocn icNeufoQs aud, nidt mcDr.
Wis 0aa 6e1ter tint 6 llhr 9!brn0a
6le Ghorlc4Itrobe, iil0lid lno moro
ltd) BON Der @nltimoreltrabc. iiGcr
~rolla, boIltcgQltinlorc nodl INNER,
(oG g llld)t meiter tontucn mitr0c.
nI9 hl8 }ltr GalncrtitroEc, no 0rc
ldlcinbor lciterieiten N~ant0cbGlloc II.
DER aus Stabl mo Irrra sofia Qt
battc &olfentrdBcr DER .GontmcH
iol Irult 80" litoIid non Der Nol
imIorcllraBc ltmlocu mo Oua ieil2
Gcltrolaebdu0c Der ~. & C.Nd6n"
oa9 oG%QuItoblc= @c6GnOc" una oay
Nrrlht9Qeb0lloc n0rolid oauou in
Der Eobn 0ca 6ellcr@ loQru. Abcr
oIclt &}o'lnunA ldmonO, ais tllri Dor
: llbr Der critic NolfenfraGcr. Ol5
o]l)nipn (ruit. @e6Gu0e," mic cine
0roBc 6adcl 6rannte.
Ger AOrOmeitcr tr>n Dcu s ll0r
Hbeuo@ an Den bogclolNtcu 6umteu
rtUcn Dem Nuien uno Der UijjuomA
Der SQnca' Sale 3lr. Goa YWiurp
Iono %nltitnt" am Wiarih Wimtt
ll0llo .nr5 nnd 8 llbr in Glummcn
lln1 lag Dor 8 ll6r bcrcita in Grim
rlern. TnIt 5ltr iciben Belt ieGtcn
Die mic Shnecflodcr bcrlnltcr lonr
mclt0cl 'dnit mo ornlQroBcn sun
len od9 @chGu0e al Der Silo-@uuitr.
bIltcr Der oWcrmonio-l url 6ollr,"
Gin SouS oil Der NorOicitc ser Nal-
tmlorcltraBc, 5mild)en @ups un0 Nul-
liOnpltrnBe, uno oic Noromrlt-Gde
poll Baltimore mo NolliOuDitruGc
III &rnno, mGbreno an Der Sil0uil
Ole bon &oters un0 Noui0oUitraBl
ho3 o)tiolto.8 cbGloe" in Tlnmmcu
ltono. Giclc fiili NrGnoe brcitetru
'ih Ian0lom aus, mdbrcnO pom yNcs
zen Die 0roBc W}oiic 0ca 5elcra III
rlllcr Srcltc bon llnGcidbr elmer bier
Der Deutsche correspondent. [volume] (Baltimore, Md.) 1841-1918, 1904-03-13

tcl Wtcilc, pomS tlrmmin0 0etriebcnL
in rolcnbcr Gle hcrungerilft fam.
lin s llbr iibcriprnlA bo@ Scllcr oic
@lgbtitroBc mo Die ct. YaulltroBc
liibiid bon Gopetteltrobc, mo Dos
,Gdrroaton- Notel" an Der Sitlcitc
DER 2i0btitrobc mlo oa@ olte @cbUl.
sc ser Baltimore Notionol Nonf,
Ionic bo9 GcntrolQebGloc Scr nGbC-
lnpcafc Nptnmuc Selep6on . 60"
i!on0cn INN 9 llhr IN benen Tlonl-
men. Cine Strn0c ip6tcr brnnn
ten oo9 muiiipc Baltimore X
Nhio @cbGuoc" olt Baltimore
lm0 GolpcrtltroBc ulb bns 9.lt0diNc
oGQuitnb!c @ebGuoc" an Sopcttc- II,
CnlpcrtltroBc, iopie ons ebcnlo hobc
GaIocrt @cbGuoc on Supettc II. St.
EouIitroBc. Mn Der 9torolcltc Der
GoucttcltroGc NOR bnS Tcllcr inter
0oIlcu bei'mo &crol0. @ebGl0c" 0llGC
lMnOt, lpeldea lunge mioerltou0 unN
cine Sdnhtnmlcr iiir 0cn &ilti}pu
ldit an Der Oitleite Der Idmalen ct
RaulitroBe biloctc. Mt Der ScrjnN
tonltrobc ie0od ltono NlcS on Der
Sii0icitc bis gum SuIti5pniolt bin
rmtcr in @runO. OoS bnbc .H0uNc
GGll0c" an Der Gdc bon S%crinQton
rno ct. Fmtlitrabc bc0robtc 0cl
prldtigm morntorten Womlmlntol
ban IN bc1n~NitiQcnoer Meiic. Ter
6eusripebr gelong ss jeopA, ZEN Su=
iti5paloit 81 rcttcn. Nllcrbin4S mlw
be bsriclbe purd) Die !9iBe i9ner be
IGGbigt. Der Wiormor SerlpronQ unp
5~crbr6dcltc. mnO rs miro 100000
erforb.rn, ben SAaten gu repariren
Nlrrd, bcroiidc NnltrcnNllngcn Der
Gellerpcbr prroen audi 0nS EoltNc
bGil0c mo On@ MatbbolS, al mel
dcn Die Nlommlcn iilblid norbciIcN
te1.. uor Der Gin1iderinlA bcmahrt.
Die Ar0Btc @einr1niB pernridd)tc
Der NatbhalStbltrm.
SiloIid uoln Der 9dliintorcltrabc
bate o0S 6eilcr untcrocIlcn Idrnelc
10 Tnrtlhrittc 9eunud)t. ,}llr lelbeu
5cit, ais oir Nolfclfrater al San.
cite mo GolncrtitraBe IN Tlommcn
itlNoclL lcgte onS Teiter nit mherm.
lthcr @cldNpinoigfcit onrd) oaV
Sentimental : 3ruIt 9sbdube" an
orr Siiooit. Gdc BON Baltimore IL.
7 GOipcrtitt6Be. 5iinacltcn Ole SLANT
men Nurd) bic @crmalt mo Sont.
bdr0iiroBe. iprangen blnilber nadl
Der T~rattitraBe uno ~bcorobten ole
&eriten an ser 2igbtitrabe, ralteli
Der Deutsche correspondent. [volume] (Baltimore, Md.) 1841-1918, 1904-03-13

pon Merilc 5l &Scrfte lulo non "a
Ncrbml9 81 SaJcrabon3 an oCr
BrattzG trdBe. 2uS Die Mittsrna6ts
lumoc fam lag Der NdnfoiItriGJ in
Der 9}adboridoit pom Gnlpcrt. Scr
man. um0 SoutbitroBc tn1rimmcrm
lu0 mar uou 0eu eriteu ]cileruen ce.
bIu0c DER McIt, 0elu oSrm-"@cbdu-
De an ser Gii6olt Gdc pQu &aIliuIos
" mo SputbitroBe Jtidt3 mcbr
iibriA, mdbren0 elm puor 1obc W}nucr
!eitc ul Der Siiomrit Gdc 0criclhcn
StraBen ole 5tr(lc tcm3ciductcIL,
ND felt bier W}sni@enaltern Der
r?lmcricoG" publi}irt luor0cu mar.
Qoo @cb6uoc Der o9tcma" an Der
Der Deutsche correspondent. [volume] (Baltimore, Md.) 1841-1918, 1904-03-13

0rontltroBc lag ihon icit 10 (lbr III
Grjlmmcri.
Gij0oit.G dc Ton Baltimore lln0
Bon ZEN Mior9en5eitungen mar jcBt
nur nod Ger ,O2utiAe GprreIpon
bent" an Der 6iiOpeIt @te pon &dl!j
more traBc uno Ypit OIFice Mpenue
iibrig; ooS o@,ralOz"@ebduo all Der
NoromeIt Gde pm 6opette= uno ct.
Youl=S iraBe, luelGeS lange pioeg
Itdno, mar audi tur3 Dor Der Mitterz
no0tsitun0e alt5gebronnt, oielRouern
unb 5uBb00en aber blieben urperz
Iebrt. Die @e6duoe, in mel6en ous
nSournaI," Die rSonntagspoIt," Der
nWed2r" uno oos y8uDeriI6e Wo4enz
Der Deutsche correspondent. [volume] (Baltimore, Md.) 1841-1918, 1904-03-13

bduf" an ser SilOoIt.Gdc BON Gbor.
les. mo &rrinQtonitroBc bIic6cu Itc,
hen, mo oab 009 Gc>lcr nidt mcitcr
6ic Gborlc3itrabr biuuui oroug luto
0u2 @obmmQ2uicrtcl scr W}illion6rc
IN Aide IcAtc. mar mlr ocnl (lnlitol
6c 5l ucr0nntch 0nB Scr 9&ino I'M
S (l6r Abcn09 nod 9}orOpcltcu I'M
iprong uu0 orfunorti0 cinicbtc. 49,
Der llnlprmN bca Miu0c9 mar Elm
Wliid fit Baltimore. SSGrc Is lliJt
qcld)c5tIL Dam ld9c bclltc mnhr,
idcinliM 1al5 Baltimore 6itlid BON
Der GbarIcSitrnBc uuO n0rolid) bon
Der @Npltrnbe in Sdnltt unb Iidc,
Der Deutsche correspondent. [volume] (Baltimore, Md.) 1841-1918, 1904-03-13

6lott" ibr 6eim 6otten. brannten aud,
bdlo no4 Niitterna6t niecer.
Grit no6 3 ll6r WtorQsns, ala
bic @e6dube OH ber GiiolpeTtiei!e oct
Glib dDItraBe uno Der Offeite Der
Bot CiFjc. 2tpenue, oas RieIenoe
bGuOe Der 6dncelsfommsr 6inter benz
Correspondents "@e6duoe, NQ.s nett
Iih bon Der 9oliOap=G traBe un0 Die
SiiOoits @de OoH Baltimore uub Spls
lipaDitrOBe fU}oment4D'5 0irt6I6afD
nur nod Auinen lpdten uuo Oa8 bon
Baltimore, &oiitaDs, 5apet!ez unb
@oDltrdBe bcaUn5te 6duTer9apicrt BE-
Utt5 LANCE in bel:n 5lommcn Ituno,
muybc has G6idIol bes lanQiGbriaen
6eims oe5 o92utIden Gotrefpon0snz
ten" beipgeit, rno 3lpei Gtunoen TpGz
ter T%.iir}tc Die ate Roine's Safe. in
wSI5}5r 10 NANCE >vjhIiae politiFhe
@eriummlunQ in b.m I,Bten 8iert2l
iabr4utoert GcGait9n DorDeu 1T, elm,
Die @rc}T2n uuo G,bmoT6inca 6.5
yriin,r1sr Ga,rrE,ra
q2it ,,,r ct,,r, Ma Acknowledgements
D.t%, T[IG,'S3 "a -rG G~oY,' Vu''m
,i,,s tS.G[ V'', 9. ij1","'o,f " ao,. wv =
arrcn 6si,H > ~S.,%%""' o, 1% rG,'' ~
g-1n ,sG@,r "~n,'g,,o p.2
f%'n5na S.5 G slltf,Sr o. eS"t' " ,n,;1 ~
Q~iG.rin5t~aSc ~, M. GrD''t a 1877 ~
r., IN, 's NS. ,"' S @,,t;1 ~ @T H,o 10 YI IT.,
Trrosm NM %~rcIr7ro@, ~, '"ei m'
mit qG,snrG,,, n,s W y,r q, ~ ''ea ''
CO.. r,,nlTt =, w." "'9 ~ o. 49,
-nni1qr,5s rc1,,, -" g..
60 ',,T,Ea' ,S .;,,aS%, s, @,n @l
5%,,s ,,r s;rn, G No." !. G,,, gr,9t 2.
Can ~, o. az; nr,,i IS Z, nor ~ @,u ~
.nor.' m,h Enfrcrftfr15e ms nar
. ntern1lirn1Ien Tr,,a "" Ssr
Observation-Disclosures 3miIhon 6o,,. VT
mn ai56iisro5,' ,2sn D9rb,r r,'r r.
f#SA:,i n.,LS.o SP7r5h W,rrt
Sr-r, ,,,r T#.n mia ,r, 9r5.nH ols
lax WoyrI9nS %2sti,,i" oerg,5rt
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1904-11-27

cooked dinner TO Judge the dinner from
the point of view of a finished thing
and not insist upon being shown
the kitchens and the coal bins and
other places below stairs where this
delectable thing was prepared for Their
consumption. I'd preach the beauty O..
achievement, not the homelmess of
preparation or ugliness of failure. If
| found a lot Of people filed with mis-
cry I'd preach hope. not more misery
If / found them full of hope, I'd still
pile it on. for hope is a thing we can't
have too much of. Give a man $40 600. =
600 and no hope and he's a pauper in
happiness. Give a chap $40 and as
much hope as he can stand and he's a
potential millionaire. And when / came
TO the point of my discourse wherein I
discussed the World-gee, but wouldn't
I pile it on. Is there anything rounder,
is there anything richer. is there any
thing sweeter, is there anything that is
fuller Of opportunity than this abused
little world? Do we know of any air
that furnishes better breathing than
the air we consume? Is there any bet
ter buckwheat on Mars. Jupiter, Saturn
or the Great Dipper than that which
little old Mother Earth, aided and abet-
ted by Mrs Pedagog, coins into cakes
for us favored sons of fortune? Have
they any better republics than our own
on any earth that we know of? AS for
society, granted that the morals of
Mr.. and Mrs. Jimmisou Bonds lately
divorced, are such as to disgrace them
selves, do they necessar ily disgrace all
society in which dwell happily the
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1904-11-27

mobile accidents and disasters on the
sea. but more people die in their beds
than in all of these combined. Why
don't you begin crusade against beds
Point out how in millions of cases. peo-
pie have in the end found in the habit
Os going TO bed a fatal ending You
knockers are not consistent, my dear
Mr.. Bib. You are always Whacking
somebody else for his shortcomings and
never considering your own"
Dying in bed is not the result of
carelessness, =" retorted the Doctor.
That's special pleading, Doctor"
laughed the Idiot ''I'm not so sure
that if the records could be made pub
lie it could be conclusiveIy shown that
dying i'm bed is the result q a carefully
conceived plan on the part either Of
the patient or Of the family physician. 80
We'll. anyhow" interposed Mr. Brief.
'is you went out this morning to preach
what would you say2 / believe that
was the starting point Of this illuminat-
ing discourse upon water lilies. railway
accidents and Edward Atkinson. Would
you tell your congregatio that they
were the people and that the millennium
had arrived"
Not ]" quoth the Idiot I'D tell
EN- when they looked upon a beautiful
book to consider it as a thing Of beauty
and not set about specializing as TO
whether the printers devil I'm the conf
posing room in which the types were
set Wore an ink-stained suit OF overaIls
and had dirty hands. or a dimity bib
unsullied of the world. I'd ask them
when they sat down to q sUperbly
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1904-11-27


Newlyweds. the Grandperes and all
the other decent families who by their
/ fine living and kindly hearts and simple
dignity have won the positions they
occupy in the public eye? The default
ing sunday school superintendent does
not make Of the Sunday school a school
Of crime One embezzler of public
funds does not make all public officials
corrupt, and out Of the muck and murk
Of American politics there has never
yet risen a president of the United
States who has disgraced his Office. and
that's the line along which l should
like TO preach. Judged by results, the
world and all mankind have shown
themselves to be pretty good stuff
Both. according to the Jerenniahs. have
been going TO the devil from the begin
ming of time, and are stil just. as far
fiom their journeys end as they ever
were"
At this point there was some commo-
ton at the other end OF the table.
Gracious me-" cried the Genial Old
Gentleman who Occasionally Imhibes.
giving a yawn and indulging in a good
stretch, Il really believe / have been
asleep
You have-and snored. too. " said the
Poet. 'The-er-Idiot has been preach
ing"
Il seem to have qualified" said the
Idiot undisturbed There is nothing
more indicative of a hopeful spirit than
the ability to sleep sOundly under I'M
usual conditions"
Copyright. 1904. by X. II Holmes.