The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1904-11-23
BowsER's BARGAINS.
He Attends Bargain Day Sale With
Mrs, Bowser.
Plain Dealer.

Mrs Bowser.
Plain Dealer.
"By Johnl but this is an outrage
ON the readereP exclaimed Mr..
Bowser as he opened his newspaper
to find a whole page devoted to 3
bargain day advertisement This
thing may interest a few old women
and young children. but they have
no business to force it upon the
rest of us If 1 find this paper
making a handbill of itself again
I'll turn to some other"
please let me look at the Rdver-
tisement." said Mrs. Bowser, dis
playing instant interest.
There it is. But why on earth
you want to waste your time over
it is more than I can see. Bar
gainsl HumpI Mrs. Bowser. did
you ever find a bargain in all your
lifeP'
millions of them, she replied.
There's hardly day goes by that
1 don't find two or three"
"I don't believe it. You simply
think they are bargains because
you don't know the value of goods.
I'll venture to say that you haven't
attended bargain sale in year
that you haven't been swindled out
of your eye teeth"
"Only yesterday 1 got pair of
gloves for SO cents, which had
been marked down from $780,"
she replied.
"Bosh! More likely they were a
pair of rs cent gloves marked up
to 90 cents. If it wasn't for the
fool women hunting after bargains
these merchants couldn't buy
steamyachts and race horses"
"What did you pay for the last
socks you bought?"
Fifty cents a pair. of course"
"Well, the very same thing is
advertised here at 29 cents. 1 know
they are identically the same, be-
cause 1 was looking at them the
other day. Wouldn't you call that
a bargain, for instanceT"
mo ma'am, 1 wouldn't" he re-
piled with good deal of heat. "On
the contrary, I'd call it a miserable
lying swindle. They are not the
same socks. They are only wletch-
ed limitations, not worth 10 cents a
pair. No doubt you'd rush off and
buy 'em and chuckle all the way
home, but I'd spot the swindle at
once"
Here are regular 81 shirts at 7S
cents," she read from the adver-
tisement, "aud regular so cent
neckties at 3s cents, and regu-
lar"
"And regular swindle for MOTH
ingl By thunder! but that adver-
tiser ought to be prosecuted and
exposed. 1t is as bad as stealing
money from a blind man.
But how-whyP" she innocent
ly queried.
Mr.. Bowser looked at her and
turned red and white swallowed
the lump in his throat, and then
he got up and walked up and down
the room for two minutes before
saying:
MRS. Bowser, L pity you and
the other women, instead of blam-
ing. 1 might sit and talk for hours
without convincing you, but I'm
going to adopt a different plan.
There is a bargain sale tomorrow
tremendous bargains unhesrd of
bargains never dreamed of on this
earth before. You are reading of
them and can hardly sit still. You'd
rather go down and go through
the store tLmorrow than go to
Europe. Very we'll, L can spare
half a day tomorrow, and I'll go
down with you and allow you to
spend at least, So"
'.Oh. but you don't mean itr'
she exclaimed, as she dropped the
paper and tried to hug him.
Yes. I'll go down with you, and
I'll prove to you that the whole
thing is humbug and a swindle,
and thus effect cure. Well ram
and jam and push and crowd and
buy, and I'll teach you a needed
lesson"
"You are suoh dear old thing