Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1904-11-11
r,ooIos TO His Friend the Mystic
RES Of Oldheld's Smoke
Wagon
AND HOW He BROKE RECORDS.
oyoncn TO IT, BILL" Said He; Bar.
me-, is de Nustatd Fer Sure Wild
Dat Green Lizard

~.. following story was writ
,.. 0r the News by T. a.
49,. manager Tor Barney oldneld.
~ '..a1bes the impression the automobile
',,.r ON am eastern track recently made
connie OF gamlns who had eneakel
| al, tbc back fence, and Mr. Moross
.,ims that he overheard the following
c1ryarsluon;
oNultsn to It Bill dat guy has Just too
,e,n roIye to I've; dey will need new
tente ln mInnlt'
oAb. gwan, dat Barney Is de goods.
us IA dc best conductor dat over ran
nm, of dem benzIne buggies Dat guy
ahead OF him looks as dough he was tied
40 a post. Did you notice him do de skat-
Inc rink around de colvoY'
N heard me sister say dat a chofnner
oas de newest ting. and dat day Is do
Neat ointment 10 have around do house
noudays as dey Is AN the stlle.
nObI say. fat, come on, dat amt DER
,ere' den call dem shutters A Kid was
tsl.n me de oder day dat when Barney
gods MS gasoline stove around a matt
mia track, dat when he GOT near de gran
uNN UIN lll lANM hAA NO AA'hN NAiA
dot bfforo ID landed on de ground dat ne
made NE next lap and caught 1t on de
dy Nutteu 10 IL, des automOber races
ide ,garmest termally dat ever com
do0r de pike. and Barney Is de best dat
eycr b0ssed buzz wagon"
"Whlt de matter Wild dem guys always
bolIerln. here be Gums, and dere he goes?
Why he Is here all dc time, / guess dat
be must be sore on de bully Wild de red
machine by de way dat he passes him,
Js must need dc dough awful had, as he
DON'T let dem get even a look at inFder
race guess dat de green lizard makes
de Empire express look like tirty cents,
SAY Fat. IN bet Inc hat against de
holo In O doughnQt dat he laps dc guy
""AS. pWan Bin: he's tree laps head now.
LOOK ont Blll duck. here ne Gums fer
de fence again. Cross me heart " de duo
Md de- biz badge didn't say dat he I'D
IA circle m hfty-tree. Nuttep " NJ, BAR
ney Il De mustard. ia sooner DO here den
10 Sunday school"
rsay Eat, look at de lobster on de
track Lookout youse en- you'll get yer
lex broke IN half sleepy Sid sails dat his
c,ir was hit yesterday wen dey was
ralnin dere smoke carts and dat he was
knocked as dad as bunch Of hay Say,
were ls dat horrible SWeed feller dat was
gon TO beat Barney last week before do
races come mere
"Oh. he amt one. two, tree, seven. lie
cot de Frappe Hoofs wen he saw de
Green Dragon breads out a few brets"
Say. Bill who Is dat brakeman guy
twlstln on dc brake on dat red box car?
And say, Bin won't Sid be sore wen we
tell him dat we bOto had cur NIT on de
Green Dragon fore dc cop saw us?'
"Oh nutten to Il; IN ! ever get bunch
N cart Weels / will get ME n shidOodle
wagon, dere de real Mccoy | broke me
sisters plano stool practising Wild It as
sterling gear IN dc paror and / got lots
on pointers from Dc gasoline stove before
blew Il mp ] guess dat de fcller wat Is
80 far behind Il drivin' a, lobster mo-
BILE. lie looks like a vile FISH Sec de
guy Dat IS looking benin all do time.
Say, YOU why don't you push on do
dashboard and get jersy on ycrself Saw
Bl look at do bulldiu' comm around do
colye ! heard dc teller Webb drlyln Il
say dat II was de sky scraper aud say
look az de guy wild de tea kittle on wees
Why does he have dat bunch of steam
trsin on behind. A Teller was telln mo
dat Brney's buzz buggy Is 80 mulepower
and dat II goes as fast as Il does. De
way dat he butts In head OF dem other
felIers you would tink dat his dad owned
a goat ranch. I heard a Teller say dat
his machine was German make, Mer-
cedes, and another guy say dat he owned
A French Pan hard, From de color and
noise q Balney's guess dat die Is Irish"
Wei, me fer do races every day