Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1904-03-03

whose mysterious workings cause ali
who are hidden within to approach
the initiation ceremony with fear and
trembling. Mr.. Head appears to have
gotten through the operation I'M
marked. Farm Machinery in its PlOw-
share club department, gives the fol-
lowing account of the initiation of the
Rock Islander:
The usual draperieS and festOoning
of the hall had been changed. In
place of the customary hangings of
blue and gold there appeared great
displays of the national colors. The
question arose as to whether or not
this was due to Washington's birth
day or whether the exalted mould
boards patriotism had been infamed
by the war news from the far east.
These queries were put at rest in
knockout time when the presiding of
ficer came in and began to put the
meeting through its PAGES. The regu-
lar order of business was hypnOtiZed
and operated upon thoroughly. 1t
was then put to bed in the incurable
ward until next necessity time.
The committee on induction, deduc
tion and soft center steel was dis
patched to the recesses of the outer
barbican in search of a candidate who
was to be initiated into the greatest
dress suit implement makers lodge in
the universe.
The committee returned shortly, un
by the party of the sec
ond part whats the trouble?" in
quired the Exalted Mouldboard,
couldn't you catch him?" "Oh, yes,
he's bridlewise and gentle enough
in front" said the beIl-veather of the
committee. but when we saw who it
was. we retired and consulted togeth-
er. Having done so we agreed that
this gentleman should be received in
a different manner to that in which
other visitors have been welcomed
and initiated"
WELL" said the presiding officer, Il
would be pleased to know who and
what this party is for whom you de-
sire to change the usual conditions
of initiation and absorption into this
body"
The leader of the committee stepped
up. and whispered a few words into
the auricular organ of the Exalted
Over the latters face spread a look
of surprise and pleasure. Sound the
hew-gag and beat the trombone" said
he, Wen do the matter in our most
original style" And the mandate
went forth. while the members began
to hustle. Fortunately the hall of the
club is near the Olive street 700, and
it was no trouble to run over and Dor
row few animals. In fifteen minutes
the club was in shape to receive the
gentleman who was to be affixed to
the roster of the club.
Again the committee. this time
robed in splendor and reinforced by
an additional body of officers of the
organization, went to the candidate.
Presently. with the sound of drums
and fanfare of trumpets the return
of the party was announced.
The curtains rolled aside from the
east end of the room, and there was
seen the candidate mounted upon
zebra. Escorting him on either side
came two shieks of the tribe of Allah
mounted on giraffes. Behind
as an escort came the rest of the COM
miteemen dressed as Roman soldiers
of the days of Augustus Caesar, and
mounted on camels.
As the candidate rode in his glance
fell upon the most startling scene of
the century.
The Exalted Mouldboard. with a
crown of fire. sat on 4 small throne on
the back Of a hippcpctamus., the
mouth of which opened wide enough
to swallow the island of Hayti.
Thanking him were the two gold
sticks, each astride a huge lion and
holding flaming trident.
Towards this startling panorama
he procession moved. the candidate /
BEING the most sclf-rosscsscd Of the !
punch.
The parade paused in the center Of |
he room. the candidate being nearest |
he hippopotamIs. otherwise the seat /
If power
Pilgrim spaEe the Exalted Mould
BOARD. "Iyho art thou. what is thy
business. and whittier dost chou pcre-
,rinatc towardst?''
MY name * Head. Frederick y.
lead. Esq. of and for Rock Island.
H.. and the rel, white and blue. which
-
maker of plows. having the finest com
,leXicn of any similar goods in the
world. and / have been iOurneyin@
uphill part of the way. but things
anne my direction. and / don't feel
my pull on the traces now at all. The
Dad runs of its own weight | am
from my home town into
few villages and hamlets like this
me YOU have built around your coun-
Ill camp. | had been told that there |
vas an implement jobber here who /
lad never heard of the red. white and /
blue plows. and | forthwith came af- /
er him. He said ii was a political lie. /
gotten up by some Of the boOdleTs !
which at enc time infested the city. to
prevent his nomination for congress
n the Eighty-third congressional dis
rict of Missouri
..Do Won see ANYTHING familiar about /