davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The San Francisco call., 1904-06-29

/ WANTED-Position by a frst-class Chinese
cook: boarding house or family. L J. NJ
lib Clay ST tel Black 365S.
The San Francisco call., 1904-06-29
EMPLOYMENT wANTED-FEMALE

EXPERIENCED cook wishes position in lunch
house; no Sunday work. Box 26O2, Call
The San Francisco call., 1904-06-29

A GARDENER wishes position; thorough
competent IN all branches OF horticulture;
years in last position: frst-class recommenda
tion. Box 1246. Call office
The San Francisco call., 1904-06-29
LODGING HOUSES WANTED.

IF you have a good lodging house or board
ing house in San Francisco for sale about
40 rooms. address box 1893. Call office DIS
Will be in the city in a few days and desire
to locate.
The San Francisco call., 1904-06-29

RELIABLE gentleman wishes position IN
wholesale house prepare tory 70 being travel
ing salesman; first-class references: 10 years
The San Francisco call., 1904-06-29

7-room modern fiat, close in, well furnished
cost $780, at bargain If sold at once; $500
The San Francisco call., 1904-06-29

COACHMAN wants situation; Is a good. care
ful driver: Is sober and Industrious; willing
best city and country references. Box 266S
Call office.
The San Francisco call., 1904-06-29
~ 81 a LONG fELT WANT IS St4ORTl
ASTHMA REMEDY.

A Di Nola's Asthma Remedy relieves instant
iy: 1oe. 25c. Soc 1902 Market. st. Nicholas.
The San Francisco call., 1904-06-29

WANTED-To buy a restaurant; not over $3.50
Address box 355S. Call office.
The San Francisco call., 1904-06-29

Ask for THE CALL. The Operator VIII Con-
meet You With the Department You Wish
The San Francisco call., 1904-06-29

YOUNG lady desires clerical position In ON
or store Box 1873, Call office
The San Francisco call., 1904-06-29

Publication Office. Market and Third. s. +.
Editorial Rooms. ....... .217 TO 22l Stevenson 81.
The San Francisco call., 1904-06-29

So rooms; best downtown commercial house
in city; clearing now $500 per month; every
thing hrst-class condition: will trade for Oak
land Alameda Berkeley property or ranch
in California; must leave city.
The San Francisco call., 1904-06-29

A JAPANESE good boy wants situation a.
schoOlbOy or hOuseworker IN family NJ. a
Post ST. tel suffer 1I31
The San Francisco call., 1904-06-29

JAPANESE girl wants place at housewoE
and plain cooking. NJ. $50 Stevenson 81.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11


Think of sections bigger than Rhode
Island being torn from glacier and
swept Off into the ocean, to be ferried
5000 miles on the bosom Of the Lab
rador current until the heated waters
Of the gulf stream cause them to van
ish from human ken. Then can one
form some idea of the immensely Of
The Ice area discharged from the Green
land seas each year. Thousands Of
miles Of valley are constantly emptying
their contents into the bays and fiords
Of the north waters, whence the tides
hurry the detachments southwark to
cumber the wide Atlantic.
The disposition of icebergs to turn
turtle Is one OF their most dangerous
propensities. 1t arises from several
causes. When they start out from
Greenland their bottoms are heavy
with the detritus gathered In their
glacial period, and this drops off at in
tervals rs they move south, causing
their center of gravity to change and
the berg to assume new positions. The
scientific theory of the formation of
the vast submarine plateaus which ex-
tend from Labrador to Fundy, and are
commonly known as the Grand banks
of Newfoundland, Is that they are the
products of bergs during countless
ages.-Leslie's Magazine.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
wtsdSw Dressing as a Fine Art.

In one important department, I'M
molested by public criticism, the ad-
vertlsers have even now established
tastefulness as the underlying essential
principle Of their competition. This
is in window dressing, vital part of
advertising. The beautiful, not the
bizarre; the attractive rather than the
startling; the alluring and interesting
are now sought In the window effects
Of every shop, from the great depart
ment store to the little candy kitchen;
from the basement lights Of modest
florist to the long plate glass front OF
shoe emporium. Salaries Of several
thousand dollars year are paid In
cities to the ARTISTS" most skilled in
window dressing, and their requisi-
tons for plants or automatically ir-
relevant as these may be to the stock
on sale and designed merely to add
to the beauty of the window picture
are hOnored ungrudgingly. In effect
the merchant says, "Give me a beau
tiful window that people will stop
and look at, and that yet shall indicate
generally the sort Of goods handle,
and l do not care what it Costa
Charles NJ. Robinson in Atlantic.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11

The editor of a country newspaper Is
often his own reportorial staff as well,
and some Of his experiences when out
after news would make interesting
reading. The editor of a fourishing
journal In a northern California town
recently called at the "home Of the
brides parents" the day after the we'd
ding. He was DESTROYS Of telling his
readers all about the event and wished
to give the young couple good send
Off as well. The brides mother met
him.
Good morning. Mrs. JONES'" said the
editor. T've called to get some Of the
details of the wedding"
Goodness" replied Mrs. Jones in dis
may, they're all gone. You ought to
have come last night. They ate every
scrap."-San Francisco Bulletin.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11

Few people probably know what II
Is that enables flies to walk on the cell.
Ing. 1t has been supposed that their
ability to do 80 was due to the fact
ahat each of their feet Is miniature
air pump. This theory was found to
be unsound, and II was then explained
that the feat was made possible by
means Of viscous substance which
exuded from the hairs on their feet.
This theory also was abandoned as
being only partly accountable for the
facts, and the preferred explanation Is
that flies are enabled to walk upside
down on smooth substances by the help
OF capillary adhesion. An investigator
has found by Il series OF nice calcula.
tons, such as the weighing and meas
uring OF hairs, that fly would be
upheld by capillary attraction were II
four-ninths as heavy again as 1t is.
Each fly is supposed to be furnished
with from 10000 to 1900 minute foot
hairs. These exude an oily fluid, and II
Is because of the repulsion between q
watery surface and this oily liquid that
a fly finds 1t difficult to mount a damp
ened glass.-IIarpers Weekly.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
HeliOtropism.

Hellotropism is the peculiar property
shown by many plants, notably the
sunfower, of always turning toward
the sun. In the case of seedlings tho
phenomenon is especially marked. The
cells on the light side are apparently
retarded IN growth, thus causing
curvature toward that side. Professor
ROmanes experimental with an inter
mlttent light, such as that Of an cleo
trio spark discharge, upon mustard
seedlings and found the heliotropic
effect produced In this way far greater
than that caused by the sun or any
other form of light. Strange to say,
however, this abnormal influence 10 I'M
accompanied by the generation Of
phlorophyll, the green coloring matter
In plants which requires sunshine for
its proper production.-Pall Mall Ga
zette.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
A PAPER OF TACkS.

You can't civilize the fellow who
doesn't care.
The best advice some Of us can give
is, "Do as / don't"
The goodness Of the interrupted is as
fiat as eggs without salt.
The more brains under the hat the
less jewels hanging to the clothes.
Some folks ought to take their con-
sciences out once In awhile for exer-
else.
Being ahead of time may spoil a min
ute; being behind time may waste
day.
Silence isn't always golden. The talk
er with something to say is worth a
dozen keep stills.
The school is the presents birthplace
Of futures, and when we shorten its
usefulness we rob ourselves and we
steal from the future.-Hayfield Mower.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
Can N ba ltstic SCORPIONS,

During many years of scorpion hunt
ing ] never remembered to have seen
two individuals living together In
amity, and even their more tender re-
lations are tainted at times with the
unamiable habit of cannibalism. The
males are decidedly smaller than their
mates, whom they approach accord
ingly with the utmost caution. If the
fair inamOrata doesn't like the looks
Of her advancing sutton she settles the
question offhand by making murder
Gus spring at him, catching him In her
claws, singing him to death and max
Ing hearty meal off him. This is
scarcely loverlike. On the other hand,
II Il dubious wife, the female scorpion
Is a devoted mother She matches her
eggs In her own ovlduct, brings forth
her young nlive-unlike her relations,
the spiders-and carries them about on
her back, to the number Of fifty, dur
ing their innocent childhood, till they
are Of an age to shift for themselves
In the struggle for existence.-Cornhill
Magazine.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11

A farmer went to hear John Wesley
preach. Wesley said he would take up
three topics of thought. He was talk
Ing chiefly about money. His first was,
"Get all you can" The farmer nudged
neighbor and said: This Is strange
preaching. l never heard the like be-
fore. This Is very good" Then Wes-
ley discoursed on Industry" "Activi-
ty," Living to Purpose" and reached
his second division, Save all you can"
The farmer became more excited.
WAS there ever anything like thisT'
he said. Wesley denounced thriftless-
ness and waste, and he satlrized the
willful wickedness which lavishes In
luxury, and the farmer rubbed his
hands, and he thought, "All this l
have been taught from my youth up"
and what with getting and what with
boarding 1t seemed to him that sal
walton" had come to his house. Rlt
Wesley advanced to his third head,
which was Give all you can" "Ah,
dear: ah, dear" said the farmer: "he
has gone and spoiled 1t all!'
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
Elrsl EnulIah Leflar

The oldest letter written In English
Of which there Is record was that to
Sir John Pelham in London by his
wife, who was then In Kent. That
letter Is dated March 22. 1889, and was
sent to London by messenger.
Up to the commencement Of the reign
Of Edward l., all letters, even Of the
most private nature, were written In
Latin. About the time of Edwards
accession, French, which had been the
spoken language Of the court from tho
time Of the conquest. began to be used
In written correspondence. In the
reign of Edward III. the English
language, in pursuance Of an act OF
parliament, was made the language Of
legislation.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
Bishop Brooks Answer.

Bishop Phillips Brooks never mar
ried, but at one time was very much
admired, courted and annoyed by a
wealthy maiden lady Of New York. To
her numerous communications, full OF
admiration and modest suggestions.
she received no encouragement from
DIR. Brooks. Recalling her advanced
age, she grew desperate and offered,
in addition to her heart and hand, all
her wealth. In reply she received the
following:
Madam-Your wealth give to the needy.
your heart to the Lord and your hand to
the man that asks for II.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11

DR.. Wells, London physician, In
1918, in his published essay on dew,
was the first to draw attention to the
curious artificial production Of Ice in
India. Shallow pits are dug, which
are partially filled with perfectly dry
straw. On the straw broad, fat pans
containing water are exposed to the
clear sky. The water, being power
full radiant, sends off it's heat abun-
dainty into space.
The heat thus lost cannot be re-
placed from the earth, for this source
is excluded by the straw. Before sun
rise cake of ice Is formed In each
vessel. TO produce this ice in guam
titles clear nights are advantageous,
and particularly those on which prac-
tically no dew falls. Should the straw
get wet it becomes more matted and
compact and consequently a better
conductor Of heat, for the vapor then
acts as a screen over the pans, checks
the cold and retards freezing.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11

The Englishman is less social than
men of any other nationality; l mean
he IL less conscious Of the ties which
bind humanity together. his moral for
nation owes little to his relations with
other men, he scarcely troubles him
self about what they think, and If he
ever considers the matter at all 1t
makes no difference in his sentiments
and actions. In short, the Englishman
is to certain extent recluse; he is
more aloof from the world In which he
lives and the neighbors whom he ell
bows than the men Of any other
nationality. - Boutmy's "The English
People"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
Birds Are MA tn e ma ticians.

The English naturalist, Morris Gibbs,
devoted years Of study to birds nests,
their formation and their contents, and
asserts that birds lay their eggs in &C
cordance with geometrical lines, so
that every inch Of space Is used to the
greatest possible advantage. Birds
which lay many eggs arrange them in
circles, the pointed ends turned to the
inside. Others, whose eggs are elliptic
ally shaped, place them in Longitude
nal rows. If an egg is moved out Of
its original position by an intruder, It
will be found on the following morn
ing that the bird has returned 1t to Its
first position. Among the numerous
and often difficult cases which Gibbs
made matter Of study, not one was
found which would not do credit to a
mathematician.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
A THEATRICAL MUSEUM,
Treasures of the Property Room of
the Theatre Francois.

AEeuSurch oh tne properly Room of
the Theatre Francois.
Great passions will ever carry II over
great upholstery II you give them their
chance. To this day the only setting
Of the chief scene Of la Malade Ina
ginaire' at the Francois is an arm
chair. 1t is carried on by a couple of
lackeys, as though 1t had just been re-
moved from a furniture van, and Is
planted right in the middle Of the
stage. That chair Is the very one in
which Moliere, playing the part Of Ar
gan In his own piece, suffered the first
shock Of the. illness that carried him
Off. 1t is but one of the treasures Of a
house that Is perfect museum not
only Of historic properties, but of the
whole art OF the stage.
In the greenroom, as NJ. Delorme, its
historian, has told us, In the committee
room, in the office OF the administra-
tor, In the archives, in every part of
the theater to which the public has no
access, there Is prodigious mass of
full length portraits, Of medallions, of
genre pictures, of engravings, draw
ings, marbles, bronzes, of statuettes.
These, with the works exhibited In the
public rooms, form unique collection
whereof every piece belongs In some
sort to the history of the house Of Mo-
liere.
The museum Of accessories Is as rich
in its way rs the museum Of painting
and statuary. Here we may find the
mandolin used In 1.-THE Barber of Sc
ville," an instrument Of rare beauty
Of form, purity of tone and antiquity
Of make. Here, too is the original gut
tar Of THE Marriage of Figaro" When
the piece came out In 1884 the man.
agement thought 1t was so sure to fail
that 1t was not worth while to buy a
guitar for the hero. An instrument
was accordingly hired Mt 10 francs
night. The piece ran for fifty nights
a tremendous success" fer that period
and in the excitement Of this sur
prise the conditions on which the gull
tar had been obtained were totally for
gotten until the owner presented his
bill for 800 francs.-Richard Whiteing
In Nineteenth Century.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
Cromwell and the Specter.

The stories of the white Lady" that
periodically visits the German royal
family and of the Little Red Man"
that frequently paid his respects to the
great Napoleon are tolerably well
known especially that Of the former.
But few, perhaps, are familiar with the
story of Cromwell's Giant Specter."
1t appeared to him one night when he
was wide awake and quietly resting on
his couch. In appearance the appari-
ton was a woman Of gigantic proper
tons. Approaching him she announced
in tones like thunder, within the year
you, my son, will be recognized as the
greatest man In Britain"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11

On one occasion, arriving at Carlisle
on horseback, Bobby Burns is said to
have turned his steed out to grass for
awhile, and the animal strayed on to
a meadow belonging to the corporation
and got impounded. Although the
horse was given up to him. the poet
retaliated upon the mayor, whose ten
ure of Office was to expire on the very
morrow Of the incident. as follows:
Was e'er puir poet sac befitted7
The master drunk-the horse committedl
Puir harmless beast, TAX thee nae care;
Thou'lt be horse when he's nae MAR
(mayoD
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
Single NothfnRness.

A number Of Philadelphia lawyers,
says the Philadelphia Ledger, were ex-
changing stories Of their experiences
with witnesses under examination. One
of the party told the following:
He was questioning witness and
said, "You have lived In Philadelphia
a number Of years. How longr
"Just twenty-five years"
"where did you live before that
time" asked the lawyer, hoping to
prove an important point.
II didn't live," replied the witness.
II was single"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
First Person Cremated In America.

First Person Cremated In America.
The first white person lawfully Gre
mated within the present limits Of the
United States, according to wishes and
desires expressed by himself, was Colo
mel Henry Laurens, one of the Revo.
lutlonary patriots. He was born in
Charleston, s. c.. In the year 1924, and
died on his plantation near that place
on Dec. 8, 1892. His will, which he
had requested them to open and read
the next day after his death, was sup
plemented with the following: II SOL
EMMY enjoin 1t upon my son, as an In
dispensable duty, that, as soon as he
conveniently can after my decease, he
cause my body to be wrapped in
twelve yards Of towcloth and burned
until II be entirely consumed" The
request was carried out to the letter
and was the beginning of cremation In
America.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11

The ceremonies at the creation of q
knight have been various; the principal
were box on the ear and a stroke
with a sword ON the shoulder. John
Of Salisbury tells us the blow with the
naked fist was in use among the an
cient Normans; by this 1t was that
William the Conqueror conferred the
honor of knighthood on his son Henry.
1t was afterward changed into a blow
with the fiat Of the sword ON the shout
der of the knight.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11

There Is a curious story Of how the
Duke d'Aosta, when king Of Spain,
told a muleteer to whom he was talk
ing to cover himself, the sun being
hot, forgetting that by so doing he
made him a grandee. Marshal Prim.
to prevent this catastrophe, knocked
the mans hat out of his hand, and &C
cording to some the muleteer had
something to do with the assassinat on
that followed few days afterward.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
Sure to he Oyerfed.

"Ah, doctor, glad to meet you," said
Mr.. Forsyte. II wish you'd drop around
to the house at about this evening"
"None of the children sick. HOPPER
mo. But they will be when they
get back from their grandmothers
They're there for supper" -Philadel.
phia Ledger
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
Not That Kind.

"What did you think of Philadel-
phia"
81 never was more imposed on In
my life" answered Colonel Stilwell
Of Kentucky. "They told me Phila-
delphia was famous for Its mint. and
all they showed me was place where
they make Washington Star.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11

~ am getting up a subscription list
for the relief Of the poor. Can't you
put your family down, sir?"
Madam, since you ask personal
question, don't mind telling you that
l can put 'em all down, except my
wife's mother."-New Orleans Times.
Democrat.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
Delicate ScOrn.

II observe that you invariably praise
your rivals" said one actress.
YES" answered the other. tits the
wisest thing to do. 1t sounds mag
unanimous and also conveys the impress
sion that you do not consider them
worth being jealous of."-Washington
Star
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
Economical.

Husband-You are not economical.
Wife-Well, If you don't call woman
economical who saves her wedding
dress for a possible second marriage
I'd like to know what you think econo-
my is like.-Glasgow Times.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
Funny.

Borroughs-Mr. Merchants out, you
say? Why, he had an appointment
with me here. That's very funny.
New Office Boy-Yes, sir; I guess he
thought 1t was too. Anyways, he was
laughin' when he went out.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11

j Sense of Personal Insecurity.
"What would you do II you saw a
ghostr said the man who tries to make
sport Of people.
"Dat ain't de question:" answered
Mr.. Erastus Pinkley. what bothers
me is what dat ghos' is gwine to do II
he sees me."-Washington Star.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
Too Much For Him.

"Oh, ices langviagew complained the
distinguished foreigner. Your wife he
is upstairs when l come in and you
call to heem: Monsieur d'Esprit have
arrive. Hurry up and come down ~
Chicago Record Herald.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
Her Objections.

docs she object to the fact that her
husband deceives herW
mot so much as she does to the fact
that he let's her know he does it."-New
York Tribune.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11

Cholly-Charming widow, isn't she?
They say she is to marry again. Algy
Il wouldn't want to be Widows Sec
ond husband. Cholly-Well, I'd rather
be widows second husband than her
first, doncher know.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11

"They say her wedding beggared de-
scription."
"Oh, more than thatw
"IndeedT
"Yes. 1t beggared her father"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
To BE IrOned.

Mr.. Troomer-Where on earth IL my
new silk hat? I've looked everywhere
for It, His Bride (sweetly)-You said
you wanted 1t ironed, dear, SO have
sent II to the laundry.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11

Husband-How is it that women's
club of yours keeps you out so much
later than it used to? Wife-Oh, we've
made a new rule that only one mem
Der can speak at time.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11

A would be grateful public is waiting
to reward the man who will invent o
car window that can always be opened
easily In summer, but can only be
opened by consent Of the majority In
winter philadelphia Inquirer.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11
CAUGHT the Iden.

Bluster--Do you mean to say that
am liarH Blister-I hope that ! could
not co so ungentlemanly thing. But
see you catch my idea.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1904-08-11

We Judge ourselves by what we feel
capable of doing. while others Judge
us by what we have already donss--
Longfellow.