The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1904-05-22

| her all swelled up With talk like pink
balloon got to be 30 trying couldnt
stand It, But shc would have busted Il
she didn't let the conversation out OF her.
| self. She used language Till had to 20
to bed and sleep 1t Off. If she COULDN'T
tell a story four or five different ways
she sceined to feel that It wasn't done
Justice to- 1t was the extravagance Of
1t that hurt me. Why, that woman used
| as good hot talk on me as II she was
selling Alaska diamonds to farmer.
1t s a curious and instructive scientific
fact that one female fi,ackerel or goldfish
| lays upward Of a millions eggs day.
She was that way; for ono idea she'd
produce about q million words. Goshl
| 1t was awful.
| reasoned with her all I could, but IL
was no use. She only cried. Then got
SO sick Of 1t I didn't answer her when
she ansked me questions, and let her run
on alone Then used TO stay away
nights. 1t began to look considerable like
divorce.
Finally. one day Sue said she had q
sore throat. Next morning she claimed
1t was worse. / wanted to call In a
| doctor, but she wouldn't have one. She
grew hoarser and lloarscr TIL finally
1 bIe COuIuu ldih III Hill i I0H WIS
| scared She was Az dumb as IL she
had been born without the power OF
speech. ] thought 1t was a Judgment on
! me about complaining. The first two or
! three days 1t was a blessed relief to have
| her so shy OF talk that they was plenty
| of room In tho air for the atmosphere;
| but when / found she could not talk
| was Just unreasonable enough to pine
Cor her voice. That's the fool way men
4 are built. sf.s
SO / called In old Nat Her1nistone, who
happened to DO in town selling the Mar
| Vicious Puritan Buchu Panacen and Liv-
| err Liborator, for beside being one OF the
profession. and as such TO DO encour-
| aged. he was a regular doctor. graduated
| from n Correspondence School OF Mcdl-
| cine in Iowa, and had effected some mar
| velous cures He was a friend Of mine.
| and tia safe to say he didn't prescribe
| Buchu Panacea. He looked Sue over.
| tapped her lungs. and said II was a par
| tinl paralysis Of the salvary glands and
| the mucous membrane combined with an
| inflammation OF the epiglottis. or words
to that effect. He give mo drug store
prescription In Latin and refused to
charge. He said Sued come around all
right II she got good nursing
WE'LL as say. l didn't seem to ex-
perlence the sense and satisfaction OF re-
| lief I would have expected had known
| she was going TO be struck dumb. I
worried heap. and when I got home
! nights the first thing ] did was TO go
up to her and say, Cant you speak yet,
susy?" and every time she Just shook
her head and smiled. patient-like. and
| I'd kiss her.
| + tried DR. snnger's electric treatment
| on her neck, but II was no good. Sue
| began TO complain by signs OF pain In
| her throat / was Just fool enough to
| buy a magic talisman OF band OF
| gypses we met going through town. and
for n while thought II helped her some.
| but she got worse again. 1t went on for
four weeks. till finally couldn't stand 1t.
1t nearly broke me up in business. for
/ couldn't seem to keep my mind on my
| talk while ! was on the street think
| Ing of Sue there at home not being able
| to tell me how fond she was OF me- and
| all the title fool things a man don't miss
1 till he can't get them any more didn't
| burn much gasoline on the corner them
| nights, but put right back home at sun
! down. and tended on Sue, telling her fun
| ny stories and trying to brace up her
| spirits.
We'll one night was pretty blue for
! Sue was coughing hard. and knelt down
by her chair and put my arms around
| her and says:
"Oh Susy II could only hear you
speak again I'd be happy all the rest
Of my lfe!' And meant It,
Then all OF sudden Sue UP and says,
as loud and natural as II she hadn't never
had nothing the matter with her:
Would you mind writing that down,
James. so that I can keep 1t by me?'
Then ! see the game. You talk about
| the power OF the human Will Think OF
a woman holding her tongue for four
| weeks on purpose to bring man round
to his senses, tell you, We don't halt
know about women yet Well never
learn, neither. Women are certainly Gu
rious folks. We can't get along with
them and We can't get along without
| them.
] or course was mad. but saw the
point and admitted my share Of the
! blame, and It did me good, She never
had to show me that paper I'd written.
YOU bet But I didn't lose anything. I
lust took them conversational powers OF
Sues and educated them by careful
training, so they could be used as a
means of livelihood, instead OF merely
making the clock go, for amusement
| you might say. Susys the best female
/ commercial orator In the business to-dhS.
4 bar none She makes a house-to-house
4 canvass for the Boon to Womankind
/ Needle threading Device and the MarYei
/ Exercises while handle the Chinese
specific in the street. We got the other
outfits skinned mile. and when we leave
4 town 1t means that every stockihB
emptied and the tin bank shook ou.'
say--wlat dye think? got Wonoer
~ q youngster Do you know that KID
could talk when he was five months
old
Copyright. 1901. by Mcclure. Phillips