The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1904-08-05
The GrandP Promoter
He Meets Man OF His Own Sort and
IL So Surprised That He
Paints Away.

4W4 prises for the benefit Of In
yestors seeking liberal divi-
dends. sat in his Office wondering how
he could make II cents pay for thirty
cent lunch when the door opened and
man OF brisk look and speech entered
and began:
II presume / have the honor Of ad-
dressing Major Crofoot. the man who
invented the Idea OF raising mud turtles
on the great Sahara desert, the man
who originated the scheme Of saving
half TIE hay by mixing seaweed with
1t. the tnancier who proved that Amer
lea could save S1OOOOO,OOO year by
doing without doorknobs and window
curtainS?"
Eyes, am the man." slowly replied
the major.
ia: Glad to see you, sir-very glad.
Have been wanting to see you for some
time. do a little In your line myself.
In fact, | have scheme CT two on
hand just now to which l wish to call
your attention. What do you say to
my idea of a reversible shoe? Just got
it patented and II company organized
for manufacture. The stock will be
put out next week at 40 cents on the
dollar. but will go to par In a month.
We will guarantee 10 per cent divi-
dcnds the first year.
1.-THE reversible is IL double shoe. You
don't reverse the shoe. but your posi-
ton. In ether words, when you have
gone far enough in one direction, you
simply walk backward. Saves time in
turning around, saves humping into
other pedestrians. Biggest thing in the
world, major-b0und to be regular
Golc0nda. How much stock shall put
you down for?"
"How--h0w much!" stammered the
major, AK he wondered II he was not
doing the talking instead Of the
stranger.
"Or, If that scheme don't strike you"
continued the. caller, as he lighted
fresh cigar and leaned back at his ease,
suppose you go in with MS on the
great Mountain Real Estate Improve
ment company.
There's an idea for you, major, and
I wonder that it never occurred to YOU
we have organized with capital OF
$i5.0OO,OQ0 by the use of dynamite ana
steam plows we propose to level all
the mountains In America and thus add
l9,OO0,OO0 acres to the tillable land.
This land will sell for 81 per acre, and
the clear profit to us will be at least
| S17O0O,0OO. Perhaps some gold mine
can beat that. but I don't see It, II
you have $4,000 or $4,000 to invest,
here's your finance, How much shall i
put you doFn for?"
The majdt swallowed the lump IN his
throat aadaooked at him in silence, His
wondermfnt was too great for words,
THAT fvas a pretty fair scheme of
yours, tajor" smiled the stranger,
that IDA of using the surplus power
OF s4ualling baby to run his own
carriade but l think I've got something
to bed It,
"Tiere are, at the lowest estimate,
24,OY,OO0 buildings in the United
Stafs. Each one has roof, Of course.
Th( object Of roof Is to keep the
w&ther out, and that alone. These
r{fs, If covered with a foot Of soil,
ybnld produce 37,52o.Q00 bushels Of
fions per year. In other words. what
j now wasted would produce $50, 000,,
40 III cash every twelve months. l
AhaNe organized the Universal Roof
Maising Onion company and next week
Hts stock will be on the market at par.
n We want Il manager who knows all
about onions. II you are the man /
can guarantee you salary of $4,000
\ year from the start. We shall ex-
D pect you to take block OF stock, SO as
] to be. thoroughly identified with the
schem.nee We WoYldn't want y9p to go
into raising carrots with some other
! company, you know. When could you
take holdi"
IL don't understand" replied the
major, as he looked around IN q be:
WIIIEateerrsed4 way end tried to locate him him
Easiest thing in the world. but {
won't press you, Perhaps you'd pre-
fer to so into the Sunlight and Day
light Storage company. All, there's
the thing for you.
Major, l am the inventor of way
Of storing up sunlight and daylight In
! big iron tanks, the same MS gas re-
cefvers, to be let out again through
4 pipes at so much per 1000 feet. You
can pipe them to any room in the
sSs ss. A$ S1a IT, ss,ssss ee.s e ass
Is entirely done. away with, and no
matter how dreary the weather Is out,
side YOU can have sunshine in your
heuae al dag long BY turning thumb.
scrM It may bs as dark az biacl
: caH1qNltside, hNt yoA turn on the day
ligk inside. and there vow are. Costs
QHhalf of gas and lasts q heap lon
e. Nothing whatever to get out o.
cSer, and yY, can trade your ga.
bIcgheerss ofs for q set Of pingpong.
psoa nA'st m9 9llss tbs good thing, major
r $H can caap, have $40, 900 worth OF stock
a d. 50 cents On the dollar, and the
J, ,&Ethflf9InYddss must surely reach Is pei
d fnt tbs very flrat year. Give me $40
III to secure your stock befor,
Ia too late, Ehq Did you say 70,
,Dwould take $1b,OOO?"
The major didn't say. He couldn'
I |aay. He got up and walked about
-thut he felt sure In his own mind tina,
l. The was In his bed in his boarding
house and having an attack Of night
Amare
II have one more good thing. con
J. tinued the caller as he jingled the
q silver In his pockets. II have JUS