The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1904-05-14

There is a somewhat exaggerated idea
of the conventions that exist in this re-
spect even in large cities and among
fashionable folk. A fierce light beats upon
the throne and those who are almost as
we'll known as royalty and have their ac-
lions chronicled in all the papers have to
abstain from many simple joys they
doubtless covet. Those who follow hard
after them in their struggle for social
eminence but who have not yet attained
to it, often imagine themselves to be Of SO
much Importance that they must con-
form to certain rigid requirements. Thus,
for instance, I heard not long ago of one
of these seekers for society-column fame
who severely criticized q mother for per-
hitting her 1S-year-old daughter to go
to the opera, unaccompanied except by
her 30-year-old brother. The mother
should have gone along, or else sent some
elderly woman friend,' pronounced the
censor. There is no knowing to what
remarks the young people laid them
selves open by going unchaperOned.'
To which a sensible woman replied,
"The persons who recognized them would
understand the situation and it would not
be worth while to worry about the judg-
ment of those who did not know Them
We may afford to lay aside the consd-
GRAFTON Of such standards as these and
study rather what rule should be fol-
lowed in the small town or the country
neighborhood among young men and
women who are in good social standing
there. How shall they deal with the
problem Of the chaperone? Shall they
ignore it altogether or conform to it in
certain instances and neglect it in 9TH
ers? And how Is the discrimination to be
made?
Here is one Of the matters where it is
almost impossible to make positive
statement. The personal equation counts
R~x, In, troll
are to be found young women who could
be protected by no amount Of chaperon-
age and others who would be secure in
the midst Of any and all temptations. But
putting aside either Of these extremes
altho T like to think that the latter is
not an extreme, but just what one might
look for from any nice, well brought UP
American girl--let us try to frame few
general plans.
In the first place, then, before granting
permission to your daughter to accept in
vitations to our door junl1etings from
young men, be pretty sure Of your young
man. He should not be picked up at ran
dom, so to speak, 1t is bad enough il
the man who calls on a girl in her home
is the chance acquaintance, with no in
dorsement except from those who know
only his name, but 1t is much worse if he
is to be girls companion on a row or {
ride or even on the golf links-altho the
ity in which to be left alone with com
paratve stranger. Putting aside all othe1
questions, there Is always the ipossibil
ity Of accidents Of one sort or another or
out door excursions and the girl who &C
cepts a young mans Invitations for one o
these should be sure that he is the man OF
whom she would be willing to depend II
case of such an accident.
Also she should know the man wei
enough-or her mother or father SHOULD
know him well enough--to be sure that hi
character Is such as to make him desir
able companion. He may not be of neces
sity bad sort and yet his bringing up
t his associates, may have been such that
girls parents may feel 1t is decidedly in
advisable that their daughter shoult
4 stamp herself in public with him as hi
friend and companion. But if he is know
to be a clean, honorable, we'll bred youn,
fellow and if the girl is the right sort o
self-respecting young woman, there is NJ
+ reason why the two may not have certain
outings together without laying them
selves open to criticism. OF course, al
these outings must be chosen with judg
ment. '.
Suppose a girl and man have been in
fected with the returning fondness TO
bicycle riding. The new wheels ar
enough to win even old boys and old girl
to desire to learn what wheeling reall.
means. Is there any reason why tn
young couple should not go out for a shor
spin Or for a long run? None in the world
If they choose to take a compact lunc
with them and eat it by the roadside an
rest there afterwards and read or chat
they may not do 1t without fear of cen
sure-provided. always provided-tha
that they are the sort of young man an
woman I have described. I do not thin
Il it is the wise thing to permit this lbert
too freely among Needless feather braine
boys or girls. There may be no res
harm in it. But the animal spirits q