davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1904-03-05
LESSON TO HANNIBAL HAMLIN.
1t Taught Him Not to Make Dubious
Jokes, but at Cost of a Senatorship.

Gazing upon the oil painting of Hanni-
bal Hamlin hanging in the rotunda of
the statehouse in Augusta, a Maine poll
tlclan whose memory runs back TO the
old days was reminded of this story show
ing how a lesson was once learned by
the Maine statesman 50 that it could new
er be forgotten:
Just previous to the time when Mr..
Hamlin entered the field Of national leg
isiation and when he was member of
the Maine Legislature" said the reminiS-
cent statesman, "a very duh day came
in that body. Nothing but routine bust
ness was being transacted, and, while it
was all Necessary for the public welfare,
1t bored the legislators to death They
We're in frame of mind when they would
seize upon anything as a means of dis
traction, and Hamlin thought he would
play little joke TO relieve the depreS-
sion.
There was a member from the back
country district who always wore his hair
we'll oiled and parted with great exact
ness. SO straight was the line OF the
parting that it always seemed as If
surveyor could not have laid il out with
greater nicely.
Upon this member Hamlins eye fell
as he glanced around the chamber in
search of subject, and getting up, he
said:
Mr.. Speaker the gentleman from
Blank has three hairs on the right-hand
side of the parting of his hair which are
out of plumb We know that the gentle
man is unaware OF this, and we are also
equally aware of the painful embarrass-
ment that 1t will cause him now that he
Is informed. | therefore move that this
honorable body do take a ten minutes
recess in order to enable the honorable
member from Blank to restore his hair to
its normal condition.
The motion was received by the mem
bers with loud cries of approval, and
was carried by a unanimous vote Of all
but the victim, and Hannibal Hamlins
reputation as Il humorist was made He
! looked upon this as most successful
Jest, until III the next session of the Leg
islature. 1t assumed an entirely different
aspect.
"Mr Hamlin was a candidate for
seat in the United States Senate He
lacked one vote to attain the object of
his ambition. And the man who held
the balance of power and could by his
vote decide who for that term would be
United states senator from Maine was
the gentleman from Blank He absolute
ly and fatty. refused 10 cast that vote
for Hannibal Hamlin. Neither threats
nor any other inducement had the slight
est effect upon him He stuck to it, and
thereby postponed Hamlin's entrance to
the Senate.
"Mr. Hamlin afterward, in telling the
story, said it was a long time before be
could see the joke or learn the lesson,
but he finally did. and he had never since
forgotten that jokes about a mans per
SOnal appearance are dangerous. 10
wound a mans self-esteem is TO do him
an injury he will never forget. and there
fore that lesson. expensive as il had been
had not cost too much. New York Sun.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1904-03-05
A Deferred Restitution.

A pig belonging to a widow named
Murphy mysterionsly vanished one night.
and Pat Hennessy, n nee rdo-well. was
suspected of having had something to do
with its disappearance He denied all
knowledge of the pig, however, and as
there was no evidence against him he
was allowed to 60 free; but at Mrs.
Murphy's instigation the priest went to
him
pat" said the priest, "if you've no
fear of the law in this world. at least
give thought 10 the hereafter. When
you're before the judgment seat. what
are you going to say about that pig
"Shure | dunno replied Pat "Wnl
ther be after askin about tn pig in
purGatory. yer riverinceE'
They will, said the priest
VIII Mrs. Murphy be there yer riy-
erince?"
Yes. Pat"
AN tn pigf"
yes. Pat"
"Shure. IN wait an give ii to her
thin. yer river!nce, '--Womuns Home
COMPANION
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1904-03-05
Brothers Are Reunited.

4 letter rs Of from the dead. was
received recently by Captain Jonathan
Morris Of Audubon. near Phoenix
willie. Pa The missiye was from his
brother. Samuel Morris. now Il resident
Of Galveston. Texas, whom he had not
seen nor heard from since the battle
Of Gettysburg. more than forty years
ago. and had since mourned az dead
The brothers were both members of
Pennsylvania regiment and fought
side by side throughout The first Of
that terrible conflict On the afternoon
Of the second day Samuel was wounded
and carried from the field
Jonathan made search for bb
wounded brother. but in the excitement
incident to those stirring days no trace
Of him could he found
After the employment of every hu
man agency hope gave way TO the
certainty Of the brothers death. anu
he was mourned ~ such by the Nor
ris family
Recently Ia reading Phoenixyilie
paper Samuel read his brother iona
than's address. He at once wrote
North. informing the brother Of his
whcrca bouts
After the battle. Samuel writes. ne
drifted 10 Texas, intending to fight
Macmillan in Mexico but he arrived
too late The brothers expect to meet
soon and have family reunion.-Chi
cag0 Inter Ocean.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1904-03-05

Quick as a fash the teamster on the
ground struck the mules of the other
and while the latter was striving 10
control his tangled-up team climbed up
Ia pull him on his seat. The two
clinched as they fell forward ON the
frightened mules and Were clawing
at each other as they went rolling
down the declivity. The two driver
less teams holted. and. wheeling in a
panic, went with the two wagons down
the incline after the scrappiug drivers.
The teams in front and behind had
a wild scramble, but were kept To the
narrow road When the commander
of the guard arrived at the scene of
hosulitieS two wagons and two drivers
were missing. and no sounds came from
below. Scouts sent down to iuvcSti,
gate found two bruised teamsterS work
ing together to get their wagons right
side up and To shake their bewildered
mules into Il realization of their duties.
With the transfers who had rolled
down fighting like wild eats il was
Here, Jake, and Here, Tom, and
they were working together sympathet-
ically and enthusiastically The Major
in command sworc they must get those
two wagons and contents up hill and
into line or he would have them shot.
Jake and Tom both said. sure, and
before night they. with the assistance
Of the other tcamsters and by the use
of long ropes and the cutting of new
road, had the wagons and their Grip
piled mules In their old place in line,
However. it was an expensive quarrel
for them. and they never forgot it.
Chicago Inter Ocean.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1904-03-05
The Future Life of Animals.

Sir William Biunden, a doctor and bar
onet, has just favored meeting OF the
Society for the Prevention OF Cruelty TO
Animals with some views on The future
state Of animals. He certainly b.-
lieved," he said, lin the future existence
Of animals, and though he could not bring
forward evidence In support of the prop
osition, he could not at the same time
bring forward evidence to the contrary
II they took the case OF the tinkeI's ass
which was born and reared in hardship
he found it bard to think that a merciful
Creator formed that animal merely to
suffer at the hands of man without re-
ceiving some compensation IN the next
life. IL not in the present - London
\auu
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1904-03-05

The story told by old letters dairics
and other documents discovered In set.
Ting the estate of the late Col Frank
Coke who died recently ut Asheville.
\. c., furnishes proof that very often
truth is stranger than fiction. From
the records 1t appears that Col, Coke
served in the Union and Confederate
armies at the same time fought
against himself in many battles. ran
away from himself on more than one
occasion. was twice shot to death, and
lived to Il ripe old age haunted al.
ways hy the fear that he had Killed
himself
Col Coke was born Nov IL. 1880 in
rutherford, y, Z. When the Civil
War broke out. Coke cot commits
sion as colonel In the Confederate ar
my. He was a wealthy man, and af-
ter the war had been in progress for
some time he received information
that certain large property interests
that he had in Pennsylvania were In
danger Of coniiScation by the Federal
authorities. Col Coke told his trou-
bles to President jefferson Davis who
relieved him from duty and gave him
permission to 20 north on indefinite
leave of absence. The colonel was a
red hot Southerner. SO rather than
weaken the Confederate army by the
loss of man he hired substitute to
serve for him while he was absent
He had only been in Pennsylvania a
short time playing the part Of a
Union sympathizer-when he was
drafted for the Union army Then he
hired another substitute, Union man
this time Soon afterward. owing TO
troubles with the Confederate govern
ment. he left the United States and
went TO Paris. where he lived for
many years.
The soldiers who served MS substi-
tuteS for Col. Coke In the Union and
Confederate armies were both killed In
the same battle-one of the last of the
great contiict--and Mr. Coke ever af-
terward considered himself I'm way
personally responsible for their deaths
III MS i"Ntl SthtH He even grew Tan
ciful enough to imagine that az the
two substitutes were killed In the snme
battle they might have shot one an
other or one might have killed the
other In some way His morbid belief
on this point was strengthened when
years afterward he looked up the de.
tails Of the battle and found that dur
Ing he conflict the regiment in which
the Northern substitute was enrolled
had been opposed through IA long hard
fought day 10y the regiment In which
the Southern substitute was serving
COL Coke died with this conviction
firm in his mind. as is shown By the
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1904-03-05

The cause % badness is attributed by
DR.. Gilbert 10 tight hatbands He re-
marks that women and savages DO not
suffer from the condition, and suggests
the use OF small cork Tenders around the
hatband, avoiding pressure 70 certain
parts or sections, leaving tho intervening
space free for normal blood supply and
free ingress and egress Of air from in
side the hat.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1904-03-05
Screw More Than 81 Feet Long.

English engineering skill has again
broken the record MessTs Somers Of
Halesowen have JUS formed from sin
gle ingot OF steel screw which (0eiDg
11la inches in diameter has the tremen-
dous length OF SIS feet Z inches. Ii has a
2-lnch thread from end TO end, and
weighs 171a tons. 1t is to be used for
150-ton sheer leg" which lifts heavier
weights than cranes can manage Lon
don Evening News
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1904-03-05

abb Bias i@Paid her for all that abe had
suffered.
Marie LEROY was tried for the murder
of Paul Beringer, and found guilty; but
the death sentence was not carried into
effect. The royal prerogative Of mercy
avs extended 70 her on account of her
youth and sex.
THE END.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1904-03-05

i strange animal half tiger and half
panther, has been brought back from
the Congo by a Belgian and placed in
the geological gardens at Antwerp.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1904-03-05

The weight Of the average sized mar
ia 40 pounds; Of a woman i25 pounds
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1904-10-06

cushions, slippers, and mendlng.
done by an old lady so years old,
wedding shirt lO4 years old, a
watch 83 years old, two baby
dresses 20 years old, an old
powder horn 70 years old. Be
sides these curiosities, displays
of cake, bread, pie, doughnuts,
flowers, fancy work, corn, ETC.,
are made. Miss Tillie Perry is
in charge of this booth. An
other thing of interest is the
display of the different kinds of
woods that grow near Harris
Grove.
The east corner on the east
side of the floral hall is occupied
by an attractive booth from
Wick Bros.
Next to this is a very artistic
display of fine pictures by the
artist, Hoyer.
The rest of this side is occu-
pied by pictures, fancy work,
quilts and other articles.
The center of the hall is oc-
cupied by exhibits by C. Kelsey
the florist and also by thinner
& Son foristsof Woodbine. The
balance of the hall is filled with
canned fruit, vegetables, fancy
work and flowers. The man
agement of the fairis to be con-
graduated ON having such a
fine exhibit in the floral hall.
The stock pens are we'll filled
and poultry exhibit isfirst class.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1904-10-06
THE FAIR.
Today Was Entry Day.

The Harrison County Fair
opened this morning, but as this
was only entry day, the crowd
was not in town, only those hav-
ing exhibits to put in place be-
ing here. Tomorrow will see
the largest crowd in the city
ever seen in Missouri Valley.
Reports from all over tn e
county indicates that the pee
pie are coming by the hundreds.
The Committees in the Floral
Hall are working like Trojans
to get things in ship-shape or
der for tomorrow. Stock is ar
riving in large numbers, and be-
ing assigned toits proper place.
The field of horses present is
Cne largest ever gotten tOgeth-
er in Western Iowa, and the ra-
ces Wednesday and Thursday
will be the best ever witnessed
in the County. Secretary w.
Fl. Withrow is the busiest man
in town, as a large amount of
the detail work of the fair falls
on him. Make your arrange
ments to attend the fair tornor-
row if you wish to see the best
and largest fair ever held in the
County.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1904-10-06
A Biz Excursion.

The Excursion to the Iowa
Agricultural College, at Ames,
this morning, was largely pat
ronized by people from Missouri
Valley and vicinity. Ninety
nine tickets were sold at the To-
cal office by Agert R. Robinson
this morning for the excursion
train, and if it had been a nice,
clear morning at least two hun
dred tickets would have been
sold. Twenty thousand visitors
are expected in Ames today.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1904-10-06
THE RACES.

In the 2::1S trot Jean won,
Black Wonder second, Axphal
third. Time 1:19a.
In the 2::l5 pace Dick Yates
won, Miss Hopping second.
Time 2:l5.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1904-10-06

Ragedy Sharpnack is in the
Valley on business.
George Norton is in Omaha
on business today.
w. II. Ramsayer and bride are
the guests of Omaha friends to
day.
Mrs. u. II. Hammond and Mrs
w. A. Granger, left for Sherri-
dan, Wyoming, today.
Mrs. L. McKendrick, of Sioux
City, is in the city, the guest of
Mrs. M. Norton.
Mr.. and Mrs. Malsi are
spending the day on their
farm.
w. p. Millspaugh and wife,
moved to Council Bluffs today,
where they will make their fu-
tnre home at 600 S. Sth street,
where they will be glad to see
their Mo. Valley friends.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1904-10-06
And The People Came.

The merchants of Missouri
Valley had a practical demo1f-
stration Saturday last, I of
what judicious advertising will
do. For a week the merchants
had filled both papers in this
city with their advertisements
of bargains offered, and had
circulated bills all over the
county announcing their special
sales, and the crouds that filled
the stores Of Mo. Valley Satur-
day was convincing argument
that judicious advertising is
what will bring the people to
Missouri Valley. The town
looked like there was a Fourth
of July celebration going on in
the Valley. People flocked to
the Valley from far and near,
brought here by the great bar
gains offered the people. 1t is
what ought ito happen every
Saturday. The same big crowds
can be brought to the Valley
every week, by a systematic
campaign of advertising. All
the people want to know is to
be informed what you have for
sale and what you will take for
it. If the price suits them they
will flock to the Valley like they
did last Saturday, and business
will boom again like it did in
"the good old days" Invite
the people to Missouri Valley
and they will surely come.
C. Kelsey is an Omaha visi-
tor today.
Miss Nellie Rourke left for
Dubuque this morning where
she will attend school the COM
ing winter. Mrs. Harvey Foss
accompanied her as far as Lo-
gan on her way.
f. E. Watkins and j. P. Lind,
of Hawarden, were guests of r.
I. Golfer, last night. Mr.. Wat
kins is a banker at Hawarden,
and is getting hold of consider
able property in this city.
Mrs. VIM. ]. Kelley and son
Tom are Omaha visitors today.
MIR. and Mrs. Brunton moved
to Council Bluffs today.
II. W. Miller leaves tomorrow
morning for Cleveland, Ohio, on
a visit with friends.
Mrs. j. G. Schulmeister is the
guest of Mrs. s. S. Elliott, in
Council Bluffs, today.
Mrs. Thomas Gilmore and
Mrs. w. c. Roach are the guests
of Omaha friends today.
Les johnson returned this
morning from a months visit
lat McGregor, Minnesota.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1904-10-06
An Afterrssn.

Miss Edith Amen yesterday
afternoon i'm response to invita-
tions sent out by her for an
afternoon in honor of her
friend, Mrs. Philo D. Clark of
Red Oak, who is visiting her.
The young ladies were sup
posed to bring their work, but
thinking they would be busy
enough talking only a few man
aged to take their work. After
a delightful afternoon spent in
talking, singing and playing, a
delicious supper was served,
Misses Lottie McGavren and
Vera Foss assisting the hostess
in serving. Full justice was
done to the supper. After sup
per several musical selections
were given, after which the
young ladies departed. hoping
that the hostess would soon
have another friend come. The
following We're present: Mes
DANES Harvey Foss, Chas.
Deur, Geo. Kellogg, Harry New
ton, Philo D. Clark, Misses Ell
eanor Fensler, Foss, Miles, Nc
Gavren, Harris, Harmon, Stro-
behn, Gertrude Cox, Reagle,
Vaudeville, Grace Cox, Nell
Heron, Lucille Shelley and
Edith Amen.
Mrs. C. H. Gilbert of Council
Bluffs is the guest of Mrs. w.
H. Emery during the fair.
Mrs. Baker, of Logan. is in
the Valley the guest of Mrs.
George Gumb.
VIM. Mcfarland and wife Of
Blencoe are in the Valley, the
guests of w. II. Peake and
wife.
Ed Madsen went to Omaha
this morning to have his in
jured eye examined by DR..
Clifford.
Prof. Beveridge and wife are
visiting the schools of Omaha
today.
C. w. Hull left for Omaha
this morning where he enters
the school for eHbalming for q
short time.
A. G. Hard is reported con-
siderably improved today.
Mrs. C. S. Hoar and son Kar!
are the guests of Mr.. and Mrs.
w. L. Rogers in Council Bluffs
today.
Married.
At high noon today, in the Of
flee of A. G. Brown, there was
united in wedLock. Karl DUNCAN
of L g a n, to Miss Mary r.
Bourn, of Sioux City, Rev. W.
L. Douglas officiating. After
the ceremony, the bridal couple
wended their way to take in tie
sights at the county fair.
The Ninth District conven-
tion of Women's clubs will
meet at Audubon Oct. II ard
IL. A large number Of distin-
guished lady guests are ex-
pected in on the evening trains
Tuesday. That night there will
be an informal reception at the
home of Mrs. Emil Bilharz and
the meetings will be Wednes-
day in the Presbyterian church.
Mrs. Fletcher, of Marshalltown,
the state president, will speak,
as we'll as several others. These
meetings will be free to the
public. More complete an
nouncement will be made next
week. Audubon Republican.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1904-10-06

Geo Atkins, Republican can
didate for auditor, was a pleas
ant caller today.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1904-10-06

The C. & N. w. R. r. Co. has
appealed from the decision of
the Board Of Supervisors Of
Monona county, on the award
of damages for the Harrison
Monona ditch. The board al
lowed $4,000 and the R. R. Co.
claimes $4,000.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1904-10-06
St. ,JoI,n items.

the first of the week.
Mr.. and Mrs. Coil spent last
Sunday with relatives in Love-
land.
Mrs. Childers, of Cradle, Wis
tied Mrs. G. w. McGavren, on
Tuesday last.
Miss Nellie Fickle accompan-
led Mr.. and Mrs. r Brookhouser
of Pennsylvania, home, where
she will make her future home.
j. B. Lyon and son Russell,
were viewing the corn prospects
around st. John, last Sunday.
Mr.. and Mrs. Harry Brown,
We're St. John visitors Sunday.
Prof. Ryon, the renowned ven
triloquist, will give one Of his
interesting entertainments, at
the school house on Thurs
day evening, Sep. Goth.
Oscar Doty and family visited
with Mrs. Doty's parents, Mr..
and Mrs. A. I. Mcintosh, last
Sunday.
Clark Prather is busy putting
in water works for Mrs. G..
w. McGavren.
VIM. Deal was a st. John Wis
itor on Wednesday last.
Charles Pitzer is busy doing
mason work for Fred Brown. in
the Valley.
Mr.. and Mrs. A. Edgecomb;
Mrs. Madison, and Rex Edge
comb, passed through st. John
on Tuesday, enroute to Omaha,
in Mr.. Edgecomb's automobile.
I. A. Denton has bought a
fine new buggy.
Ben Rofuls has moved to Mo.
Valley to make his future home.
Miss Nellie Heron returned
from Dunlap this morning.
Miss Fannie and Dollie Nor
row, of Modale, are Valley visi-
tors today.
Thomas Elijah, of Cedar Rap
ids, Iowa, was in the Valley on
yesterday, the guest of Mr.. and
Mrs. Gerge Lowry.
f. L. Stoddard returned from
st. Louis, last evening, where
ne had been visiting the Fair
for the past two weeks.
Mrs. r. c. Hills, Of this city,
will sing a Solo at the Ninth
Congressional District Club, to
be held at Audubon, Oct. 1918.
L U Hupp moved his family
from Omaha to this city yester-
day.
Mr. and Mrs Geo Moatz, Of
Clay township were the guests
of Mrs Amelia Ritchison yester
day.
Col Orr is having his home
remodled and made larger.
Morris Hearn left for Coun-
Gil Bluffs this morning where
he assumes his new duties as
manager of a grocery store.
Thursday night. Remember
this is the night for the annual
meeting of the Presbyterian
church. Let all members and
supporters be there. Yes? cof-
fee and doughnuts.
Mrs. DR.. White, of Logan, is
in the VALLEY for a few days
visit with her daughter, Mrs.
DR.. Giddings.
Sam Richards went to Modale
this morning on business.
Rev. Schollert went to Strand,
Adams Co., this morning on bu-
siness.
A Big Excursion.
The Excursion to the Iowa
Agricultural College, at Ames,