davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
The Wicl.edest Bit of Sea.

Nine out Of ten travellers would tel
inquirers that the toughest piece OF
water Is that cruel stretch In the Eng
lish channel, and nine out Of ten trav'
elers would say what was not true
AS a matter of fact "the wlckedest
bit Of sea" IS not I'm the Dover strait
or in yachting, for example, from st
Jean de LUX up to Pauillac or across
the Mediterranean race" from Cadi2
to Tangler, nor Is it In rounding Cape
Horn, where there is what sailors cal
"true" sea. The "wickedeSt sea" is
encountered in rounding the Cape OF
Good Hope for the eastern ports OF
Cape Colony. Shipping World.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11

~ Unless the number of inser
tions is marked upon the MANS
script, advertisements will be pub
lished until forbidden and charge
accordingly
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11

A drunken man who sought 10 buy 2
ticket at tLeatcr box Office was lie
nicl tie privilege. whats mattcr|
demanded the applicant. What's mat
ter with me-" We'll. If you really
want To know" responded the keeper
Of the box Office. "yoU're drunk The
frankncsS of this reply had rather 4
SOLDERING influence upon the playgocr
He gathered up his money with dig
nifty. "Of course In dr. <" he said
cheerfully cs be turned % 20. u
wouldn't cone to zee .iis play If
were sober. wo"ll -
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
Why They Waited.

A story Is told which couples the
names Of Princess Mathilde and the
great painter Gerome. The princess
and the painter had both been invited
to q dinner party. The princess arrived
punctually; the painter tarried until
long after the dinner hour was past.
The guests concealed their impatience
as best they could, until at last the
princess suddenly said: why, nearly
forgot. Only this morning received
n telegram from Gerome, who Is In
Spain. He is unable to come tonight"
"But why did you not tell us before,
princessY cried all the guests together.
Because | was not yet hungry"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
Rapid Typeyriting.

An official stenographer, Deming, al
Albany, years ago reported court pro
ceedings on a typewriter at the rate OF
$50 and 10 words minute. He elm
mated the vowels, using consonants
only, with a dot to separate words
His typewriter was incased in glass tt
deaden the noise. The paper was run
into the machine from roll. Lawyer
could read the notes.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
Diytding the Sexes.

While worshiping in a little chape
of-ease q few miles from Ruthin, o.
the Wrexham road, the sexes are :
strictly divided that they cannot eve.
see one another. The building forms
right angle, in one arm Of which th'
men sit and the women in the other
It was built and endowed 10y a mi
sogynist Of the Stuart period who ob
jected to having his devotions distract
ed by the sight of the hated sex and
sympathizing with male posterity
stipulated expressly for this division
I'm his deed of endowment.-Londol
Standard
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11

a father of much experience says:
Wash a baby clean and dress him up
real pretty, and he Will resist all ad-
vances with the most superlative cross
ness, but let him eat molasses, ginger
bread and fool around the coal hod for
half an hour and he will nestle his dear
little dirty face close up to your clean
shirt bosom and be just the lovingest,
cunnlngest little rascal In all the
world "
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
The Cuban workman.

The Cuban workman is a kind hus
band and a fond father Of famil.
usually of patriarchal size. He live
simply. At the bedega he buys hi
tasajo Gerked beef, rice, vegetable
and cheap wine, and very savory ar
the stews his meek little wife prepare
at the one hearty meal Of the day
about $50 p. m. The Cuban eats bu
twice daily. He is underfed and over
stimulated. He has coffee at I a. m
a light breakfast at IL a. N and eat
his chief meal at twilight.-Southerl
Workman.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
A Japanese Mimic.

A jolly little story is told by 4 con-
tributor 10 an English paper about a
curious faculty the Japanese have OK
initiating animals. Il remember some
years ago" she says, being at Il Christ
mas juvenile party when nephew Of
the mikado was present. The young
prince got himself up by means Of q
muff, a sable mantle and boa for n
tail to look like some extraordinary
feline and then crawled into the room
where the Felis domestica was enjoying
the hearth rug before the fire. There
was something so sinuOus and lifelike
in his movements that the wretched
grimalkin almost flew up the chimney
with terror"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11

It IS said that of all cOlOrs violet Is
the one most stimulating 10 the eye
coats and that the electric light. and
more especially that given out by the
large lamps used in many public places,
is rich in violet rays. 1t Is claimed vio-
let dresses and draperies are response
bic for many eye cases" and for not a
few of the skin troubles about which
the dermatologist is frequently con-
suited.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11

J 0anCse dcitics are rs kindly and
gen. . hearted aa the people them
sclvc Their story Of tie creation Il
uuain.. Two gods whose very lengthy
names may be shortened 10 Ian. =
ami IZanamD. standing upon the bridge
Of heaven. cast grains Of rice abroad tC
dispel the darkness. They then pushed
spear down into the green plain OF
the sea and stirred IL around. This
spear became the axis Of the earth
started ii revolving and thus brought
about the dry land.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
Look I'D.

The troubles Of people are unneces-
sarily multiplied by the fact that they
are forever looking down instead OF
I'D, which is only another way of say
Ing that they live on low plane in
stead OF on a high one; that they
breathe the miasmatic airs OF the
swamps instead Of the pure ozone or
the hills. and so miss the real meaning
OF the true happiness of life.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
Thc Mnila In StXenen.

In certain parts Of Sweden, where
the most absolute confidence is rcpOsed
in the honesty of the people, a very IN
formal postal system IS In vogue. AS
the mail steamer reaches Il landing
place man goes ashore with the let
ters, which he places in an unlocked
box on the pier Then the passerby
who expects a letter opens the box,
turns over the letters and selects his
own without being questioned by any
one
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
A trn.r Of SfrnnEfh.

Tradition has immortaliZeu one, ,AdaT-
coma of Grand Canary, who cou.d
wreStle for two consecutive hours aAd.
having been thrown undermost III
certain contest, got his antagonist be
tween his legs and arms and squeezed
him so that his bones began To crack.
The native was subsequently sent as
prisoner to Spain. where he astound-
cd the people H. his performances
one day in Seville lie was visited by
brawny youth of La Mancha, who Was
anxious 10 try Il bout with him. My
! good friend" said Adargoma, las we
IRE going 10 wrestle together Ii Is only
reasonable that we should begin by
drinking something"
A large bowl OF wine having been
brought, he took this in one hand ana
continued 70 address his challenger: III
with both your arms you can overpow-
| or one of mine, so as to hinder me from
drinking every drop of this wine we
will try our strength together; If not,
YOU may return TO yClr home Ihe
struggle took place, and Adargoma by
degrees drained, the bowl in the coolest
manner without spilling drop OF the
wine. His one hand was more than a
match for the 0her's,two.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
The man that makes character makes
foes.-YOung.

The man tnat UlakeS CudIdCtci uA0Se
foes.-YOung.
What Women Once Couldn't wear
While we may pick and choose ana
do exactly as we please about our
clothes, there have been In times gone
by, In many countries and even In our
own. what were known as "sumptuary
laws" These laws regulated expendi-
ture for dress, for ornament, for FOOD
or for whatever refreshments you
might give company when they came
to take tea.
Among the first Of these sumptuary
laws was one made in Rome in 215 Il.
G. and called the "Oppian law" 1t de-
clared that no woman should possess
more than half an ounce Of gold, wear
n dress of different colors or ride In a
vehicle I'm the city or within mile OF
II except on occasions Of public reli-
pious ceremonies. This law lasted only
twenty years.
Itaiy and France are the countries
where most OF these laws have been
passed, and some Of them read very
strangely. In 1890, I'm Italy, no woman
was allowed TO wear dress with Zig.
ures painted on II: she could only have
them embroidered. And I'm 134S, In the
same country, neither dark green nor
black dresses were allowed to be worn
In the morning. st. Nicholas.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
Tho Wrnnm Nnfinn.

az would like to get ribbon for my
typewriter" said the man to the young
woman with the yellow. home destroy
Ing hair behind the notion counter of {
department store.
woman or machineP asked The
clerk.
Machine"
STATIONERY counter 70 your left
Cleveland Leader.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
The Retnrf DisdninfuI.

Ellen Terry, the famous English ac-
tress. in the kindness Of her heart once
took n girl out Of the poOrhouse TO train
as a servant But she was altogether
hopeless and was continually breaking
plates. dishes and everything she laid
hands OH. until Miss Terry thought that
in time she might break her. so she dis
missed her. Eur. not wishing the girl
to come TO any harm, when she was go-
ing away she asked her what she was
going to do for a living. oh she
said disdainfully, IF the wust come 10
the wust can 90 on the stage
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
Happiness.

II am sometimes accused writes
Sir John Lubbock. "of being too op'
timistic. But / have never ignored mol
denied the troubles and sorrows OF life
I have never said that men are happy
but only that they might be; that II
they are not so the fault is generally
their own; that most OF us throw away
0oeo happiness than we enloy."
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
Quietcd Them.

There Is an old story Of Arthur Rob
erts, an English actor, which illustrates
how little presence of mind may save
lives. There had been an alarm OF
fire in the theater, and panic seemed
imminent. The actor walked TO the
footlights and addressed the audience
Ladies' and gentlemen he said, I'll
there was any danger do you think
should be hcre?"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
The PruEy BED,

Always locate tie pansy bed in an
open. airy place. where the wind can
have free sweep over Il. 1t IS mis-
take to plant panSies in the shade Tn
der that condition the stems become
weak and struggling, whereas the
plants should be stout and stOcky
with the flowers borne on moderately
lOnc StpmS
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
street Through Il Church.

One OF the best known instances of
churches with streets through them is
that Of ST. John the BaptiSt's church
in Bristol. England. The church is sit
uated right over the ancient gateway
into the city on the Avon, and the tow
cring spire, standing high above the
neighborinC houses and streets. is a re-
markable sight as one surveys it from
the roadway below.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
He Could Hear.

Grandfather TO granddaughter,-l
think. dear, my hearing is returning.
fancy | can hear John snoring on the
sofa over there Granddaughter Shrek
ing through an ear trumpeD-Thats
not John snoring. grandpa. That's n
German band playing in the street
Grandfather (savagely) - Send 'em
away. | can't bear the noise.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
Old English Customs.

Sir Walter Besant's study of old Eng
lish customs shows that the doctors of
several centuries ago prescribed for
fevers "a cold water affusiOn" with
drinking OF asses milk. When the
queen was Ill in 1868 they shaved her
head ard applied pigeons to her feet
Powdered mummy for long time was
considered to be a specific against dis
eases. 1t is said that the reason 1t
went out Of use was that dealers took
to embalming bodies and then sold
them for genuine ancient mummies.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
Narrow Escape.

Virgins (thc coachmam What a
shocking accident almost happened rs
| was driving mistress in the park this
morning, Bobbins (the butler)-Wig-
gins Wiggins-Oh, yes: fat man
slipped and fell. sprawling on the
ground most comic. and | came near
smiling-BrOwning Magazine.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11

Some Of NJ. Gerome's artistic treas
ureS had a curious origin. When in
Const0nt.nopie once lie was brought
into contact with a worthy man who
sold most beautiful objects at exceed
inGly reasonable prices. 1t turned out
afterward that he was the keeper of
one Of the imperial palaces and had
been in the habit of laying under con-
tributiOn the cabinets intruSted TO his
care His end, however, was not en-
cOur0ging, for one day he was caught
in the act and subsequently impaled.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
Trustfui.

"a woman will not esteem Il mar
whom she cannot trust said the NOR
alist.
YES" answered Mr.. Meekln. "and
am delighted 10 note that lenr!ettf
always trusts he to put the cat ou
and fix the furnace fire ana lock the
basement door and do lot Of things
Washington star.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
A Hard prnnQsitiOn.

One OF the hardest things for man
to do when he has come home late
from the club and tried to so to bed
without taking off his collar Is to ex-
plain to his wife he heard it was
good cure for sore throat.-New York
Press
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
PcrhaDN u Wns.

81 wonder what time Mary's young
man left last night" said mamma.
ut must a been exactly l O'clock
ma" said the younger brother.
"The idea How DO ycI know
"Why. just as he was leayin' ! heard
him ask Mary some question, and she
said Just one, only one '"-Philadel-
nhia Ledger.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
Nommsen's REGULARITY.

On his eightieth birthday Theodor
Mommsen. the historian, received a
visit from a great delegation OF stu
dents. who marched out to his home
but he could not be induced to leave
his work to greet them. They see me
every day at the university" he said.
why do they want to disturb NE
nOwY
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
Too Independent.

what! Fell downstairs? How die
it happen?"
"Why, you see. | started to 60 down
and my wife said. BE careful. John,
and I'm not the man to be dictated to
py any woman-and so down went"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
Too Deserving.

A young village maiden had obtained
the mOdesty prize. Il suppose then,
my child" said Partisan lady ad-
dressing her, you are the most modest
girl in the parlshg'
There Is not the slightest doubt
about that, ma'am, and it's Il down
right shame | didn't get all tie other
prizesv-Paris Journal.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
nlncLinU Him.

Carrie-Im sure you misJudge Mr.
Sweetser, papa. He is man of great
ambitions. You should hear him tell OF
the things he is going 10 do. Carrie:
Papa-And | suppose I'm one of 'eln
but I'll reckon he'll find 1t hirder to &C
complish than he fancies ii IS.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11

"Going to return it, did you say? II
Is wonderful-an inspiration. Certain
", tell him you will sing it. 1t is
bound to make both you and him.
Nine. Sterling always thanked the
fates for bringing Barnby to her house
that night.-London Chronicle.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
The EVIL Eve Among Egyptians.

The modern Egyptian is believer
In the evil eye, TO avert which he
hangs around the neck charms suppos-
cd to possess magic power. These
are usually worn by children and con-
sst Of little tin or leather cases, which
inclose words either from the Scrip
lures or the Koran, If the children are
OF MOslem parents.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
InIpDentfCnt Th0ught.

One self wrought problem will give
more vigor than thousand worked
out for us. 1t is the constant stretch
ing Of the mind over large problems,
over large molels-it is independent
thought that increases mental power.
-Srnnnss
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
Wanted the Best.

Mrs. Shoddy Ito shopman)-Show me
thermometer, one of your best. Shop
man-This, nla'am, is one Of our finest
Venetian glass and the best quicksil'
yer. Mrs. Shoddy-Silver! That would
he nice for the kitching, but | want one
for my boOdore. Haven't you one with
quick goldi
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
a Rejected Recipe.

Edith-Just think. Here's thought
professor who teaches that one can be-
come beautiful by persistently thinking
herself beautiful. Irene-Oh, pshaw!
We could point ont so many instances
10 the contrary.-Smart Set.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
Nh petter Than Father Used to Make.

Young Husband - Still sitting up,
dear? You shouldn't have waited for
me. WIS detained downtown by i'm
portant business. and Young Wife
Try some other excuse. George That's
the kind father used to make.-ChicaSo
Tribune.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11

"Do you think he Is really In love
with your asked Maud.
81 don't know" answered Mamie.
"He says he Is. but his letters don't
sound q bit y."-Washingtoa etAS.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
WcrrJ Vhpn RP JsefuI,

Grinder-What! Asleep - your desk,
and wor; so pressing. Mcckiy-EXcuse
me. sir. baby kept ne awake all night.
Grlnder-Then you should have brought
it with you TO the olHce.-Town and
Country.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
1 Natural Executor.

81 don't wish 10 lr rude, Banks but
you'd make an excellent cXeculOncr."
"Why?
"Wcll. you see. YOU have such nat
ural aptitude for minding other peo-
pies business"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
What He Wanted.

"a tall bride IS the best looking,
don't you Think
Well" replied the titled Englishman
who had caught on to little American
slang, $50 far as am personally con-
cerned | certainly am not looking for
one who IS short. '"-Chlcago Post.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
Ceorre Francis Trains wit.

One of George Francis Trains say
ings was: People call me insane. /
don't wonder. What would village
Of peanuts say if cocoanut rolled in
among themY
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11

4 sharp tongue is the Only edged
tool that grows keener with constant
use.-Irving.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
Teeth.

How strange it is that you tell q
horses age by the horses teeth, but q
chickens age by your own!-Town
Topics.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
Loss OF Flesh

When you can't eat break.
fast, take SCOTS Emulsion.
When you can't eat bread
and butter, take SCOTS
Emulsion. When you have
been living on a milk diet and
want something a little more
nourishing, take SCOTS
Emulsion.
To get lat you must eat
fat. Scott's Emulsion is a
great fattener, a great
strength giver.
Those who have lost flesh
want to increase all BODY
tissues, not only fat. Scott's
Emulsion increases them all,
bone, flesh, blood and
nerve.
For invaIids, for con.
vaIescents, for consumptives,
for weak children, for all
who need flesh, Scott's
Emulsion is a rich and com.
Portable food, and a natural
tonic.
SCOTS Emulsion for bone,
flesh, blood and nerve.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11

, Don't say man is shiftless. Be po-
lite and say that he Is too cOntented to
ever get rich.--Atchison Globe.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11

Hope. deceitful as 1t is. carries US
agreeably through life.-La Rochefou-
cauld.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1904-03-11
ShenandoahHerald
Advertising Rates

Adv tisements VIII &c Inserted
at one ollar per square Of ten ines
or less for the first inseI ton and %
cents Tor each subsequent insertion.
s&- Quarterly or yearly. sd'os'
tsements by contract.
The Vinita weekly chieftain. [volume] (Vinita, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1902-1905, 1904-03-24
ADAIR ITEMS.
Notes of General Interest From onr
Neighboring Town.

Mrs. Seth Archer Is spending a few
weeks IN Elk City, Kansas, visiting
her father.
Mrs, Joanna Duncan was the guest
of Mrs. Jno. Archer last saturday and
Sunday
on last Saturday evening the ladies
Of the NJ. r. church gave "measur-
Ing social" IL was not financial
success, owing, perhaps, TO the fact
that Il bad not been sufficiently adj
Yertised
Mesdames Frank Seaton and w. j..
Stuart were the prize winners IN Mrs.
Donnie Hill's fancy work rattle.
Mrs. Tom Johnson and her two chill
dren, Alya and Bessie, have gone to
Springfield, Mo-, TO visit Mrs. John
sons mother.
The Presbyterian Young people or
ganlzed Christian Endeayor Society
last Sunday, with DR.. a. V. Adler as
president. Services VIII be held on
the second and fourth Sunday even
ings, taking the place Of preaching
services during the absence OF min
lister.
Mr. and Mrs. J G. Breeding have
been quite IN with grippe.
Mrs. G., II. Warren and daughter
Ollie. visited Vinita on Wednesday.
Miss Nora Delozier came home from
Galena, Kans., Sunday night, having
spent an enjoyable six weeks with her
sister.
j. G.. Breeding is having a stone
pavement laid in front Of his property
on Mayes street lie expects soon to
open q racket store
The business Of Adair is increasing
with each succeeding week. Last Sat
urday was an especially busy day
Many farmers are busily engaged
in planting corn.
The Vinita weekly chieftain. [volume] (Vinita, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1902-1905, 1904-03-24
SOUTH PARK
IMPROVEMENT
Forest Trees and Eyergreens
Are to be Planted.

The committees representing the
commercial club and the city council
met today and completed arrange.
ments for planting trees IN South
Park.
a double row Of elm and ash trees
are e be planted around the outside,
and one hundred and 30 hard naples
aud about twenty-five eYergreens are
also TO be planted.
A few blackberry, mountain ash and
whiteoak were selected and some weep
ing trees.
L, b. Bell aud Capt. Wilkinson will
have charge 81 the work OF planting.
etc.
Tie ladies of the Sequoyah and
the Entire Nous clubs viii have q
share III raising the funds and hi lay.
ing out the grounds