The Washington times., 1904-01-27
"SLUNBER TRIO"
HAS AWAKENING
District Investigating Com
mittee Holds a Meeting.
EXCITEMENT AMONG CLERKS
Story OF Hearse Seeking a Corpse and
Finding No Use for EN-
balming Fluid. n

The unexpected has happened, and the
employees OF the District government.
both Of high and low degree, are IN a
fever Of excitement. AS the pale and
nervous clerks hurry hither and thither
along the dark Railways they whisper
to each other:
Have You heard the news?"
The old District cat has thrown Off
the lethargy of its winters sleep ana
purrs knowingly; the janitors WELD
their brooms and pans with more alac-
rity. and the air Of something unusual
and extraordinary has percolated into
the remotest corners Of every District
Office
And no wonder-the Slumber Trio. the
Cobweb Committee. the triumvirate
which is alleged to be conducting an
investigation into the affairs Of the Dis
triet government, met yesterday after
noon and actually transacted some busi-
ness.
mis- is the famous committee which
has been resting on its oars for many
moons, the committee which was her
aided last July as the savior OF the
Districts honor and integrity, because
of the work IL was going to do. It's
progress (?) has been noted from time
TO time in The Times, and it's meeting
yesterday afternoon Is the most impor-
tant in recent local history
No Questions Asked.
No one has dared ask when the next
meeting viii be held, but the hope is
expressed by some District officials that
the investigation will be completed by
"A. ID. 1919, or within few years there
after The present generation Of Off
Gals do not expect to live to see the
report OF this famous slumber trio.
significant fact was noticed yester-
day by the Times reporter. which may
or may not have spurred the committee
on to its extraordinary action Early in
the forenoon a hearse from a local un-
dertaker, drawn by two solemn black
horses. came TO a halt directly in front
OF the District Building Its driver tied
the horses, and entered the building. Ii
Is understood he asked where the mem
Ders OF the Investigation committee
could be found. but as that question has
been unanswerable for many months.
the undertaken went back to his hearse
empty-handed. The black-draped We
hicle remained in front of the District
Building all day. until the gladstone
news echoed and re-rchoed down the
halls that the committee had met. and
that its members were not, really dead
The undertaken then drove away. and
VIII use his embalming fluid on some
other corpse.
Rocky Road to Travel.
The slumber trio has had, and for that
matter Is having, a hard and rocky
road TO travel. II is charged with exam
lining methods I'm vogue IN the various
departments and making suggestions as
70 how those departments should be
run. II is said that at its last meeting
the committee dropped on to what ii
thought was a gerat idea. For weeks
and weeks the committee evolved this
idea. until, like a snowfall. II grew and
grew. Fully impressed with the idea
that they had invented a scheme which
would revolutionize the administration
OF municipal affairs, the members Of the
committee advised the head of one OF
the departments OF their conclusions.
1t is also reported that the head of
the department informed the committee
that he had endeavored TO apply that
scheme twenty-five years ago and found
II wanting The committee discovering
II had discovered something which had
been discovered quarter OF a century
ago, resumed its Rip Van Wrinkle sleep