Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1904-07-23
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He-He is. She Exchange.
You hold my future happiness. he
told the girl. why don't you hold it
yourself:' she asked, Chicago
Post.
Experience. you know. is a good
teacher" Yes, but wish there were
more vacations in that school. Chi
cago Post
Are your intentions toward the
widow seriOus?' oh. very. | am go
ing. IL possible, 10 get out of marry
ing her."-Iife.
Tailor-Do YOU want padded Shout
ders. my little man? Wnlie-Naw;
pad de pants. OATS where need
1t most.--Chicsgo News
Did Jerrold get anything out of his
rich uncle's estateT Well, rather
he married the daughter of the attor-
ney for the estate. Ex.
Boston Governess-Yes, children,
the eyes enable us to see. Now. Emer-
son, tell me what the nose is for.
Iittle Emerson-It for holding eve
ga sses.-Puck
bioehs-H Have you ever had any ex-
perience with train robbers on yonr
travels? Slobbs Wen, I've stacked
up against a good many Pullman ear
porters.- Philadelphia Record
Il don't believe bachelors have any
hearts" she said. why, were last
the men who do have them" he re-
piled, why is that?" she asked.
Because We haven't lost them"
WiIiie--Pa. can't l have some
Pa See here! You've got a plateful
of food before you. Wnlie-Yes. sir;
hut Pa-Well. keep Your mouth
shut ana eat it.-Philadeiphia Public
Ledger
\ new order: You don't mean to
say You girls have started secret So
cietNt' Yes, It's IA society whose
members pledge themselves TO tell all
the secrets they know. Philadelphia
Ledger.
Cannibal King That missionary
made an awful fuss. didn't he? Head
were frightful. Cannibal King Wen,
serve him as a piece de resistance
Town Topics
She But If YOU say you can't bear
the girl. why ever did YOU propose?
He--Well her people have always
been awfully good 10 me, and it's the
only way could return their hospl-
tally Punch
How | envy that boy = said Smish.
Yes" acquiesced his friend; I'VE all
envy a sturdy youhgster Ike that for
his youth on that's not il!
He's the butchers boy. and you should
hear the way he talks to my wlfem
Come. now" said mamma, who
had taken the children For walk
through the Zoo, lets go home and
see papa "Oh. no. protested Elsie
lets see these other monkeys first"
Philadelphia Press.
ct the New York kind: Would
( YOU mind keeping that hat on" Keep
/ it ON. Why, | was Just about TO take
( IL OF" II: know it, Rut | don't
want TO see any more of this play
than l can help. Life.
Gothamite--I hear YOU have Vas
! sar graduate FOR cook Isn't Il rath-
/ er expensive? Harlemite-Not very.
She works for her board and clothes
Gothamite--Wh how does she come
to do that? Harlemitc She's my wife.
Harlem Life.
Chronic shopper How much are
your Baldwin apples? Fruit Vendcr
Fifteen cents a quartcr-peck. Chron-
ic Shopper--Cant you sell me a quar-
ter peck for II cents? Fruit Vender
Yes, hut not so big quarter peck
Baltimore American.
Their meeting She hushing cx-
pectantlyJ Fred Smithers, as liyel
Poor fellow 1t Saddens me to think
how broken up he was over my re-
fuSal. lie (wriuking forehead
Where in thunder have seen that
woman before brooklyn Life.
why does Mrs. Clubwoman look
50 sad" The worlds injustice 10
woman has Just struck her forciby
again" How was that She hap
/ pened 10 think that Martha Washing
ton isn't called the Mother Of her
I Country. '--Cincinnati fines star
/ Applicant dor position as cook
How many AFTERNOONS out durin' the
wake, min: Mrs Hichmore Well,
Of course you can have every Thurs
day and ADplica ut-I'm askin'
We. MIN, how many afthcrnoons out
yc want ycrsilf Chicago Tribune.
Towne-Hcar what Spinkips lid
when the collection plate came round
10 him in church last Sunday? Browne
No Dropped button IN, / sup
pose Towne-N0t even that He
leaned over and whispered; II paid
/ the pastors fare in the ear yesterday
morning Wen call il square-phil-
adelphia Press
Mandy, de rec'icct how Henry
. ali ii