Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-05-12

A man may be perfectly square and
move in the best clrcles,--phlladelphla
Record.
He--If I tried to kiss you would
you call FOR helpl--She--woul you
need itf-SmArt Set.
Mrs, Buye-Have you any low even,
ing gownsi Saleslady-Low cut or
low price, madamt--Boston Post.
The Debntante-I think she's Just az
pretty aa she can be- The wallnoweT
Most girls are,-DetrOit Free Press
Between the acts: Governess-w Well,
Marjorie. have you done cryingH Mar.
jorle--No, l haven't I'm only restingl
Punch.
Didn't you feel like killing the
waiter when he stood you up. for a
tipr "YeS felt like giving him
no ouartsr"-Cornell Widow.
so Jagsby has absconded. Another
good man gone wrong" Nonsense.
It's merely a bad man who has been
found out."-Philadelphia Ledger.
Mrs wackum How did that
naughty boy OF yours hurt hlmselti
Mrs, snapper-That good little boy Of
yours hit him on the head with
brick.--Tit-Bits,
80 you think your country will bo
lostf'' II haven't quite made up my
mind" answered the King Of Corea,
whether It is going to be lost, stray.
ed, or stolen. Washington star,
Ma-oh. how cruell In India they
whip children with young palm.trees.
Willie-Huh! Don't you spank me
with your palmf And 1t amt such a
young palm. elther.--Boston Post.
Marriage" remarked the morallxer.
"is a lottery" "Yes." rejolned the de-
moralizer. "but it's one of the games
OF chance that clergymen do not try to
discourage. ."-Cinclnnat Enquirer.
Passenger Why don't you pro-
nounce the names OF the stations so
that we can understand them7 Brake
man-What do you expect for thirty
dollars a month"; college professorf
He-Yes, l remembered you at onco
as the girl was engaged to In tho
mountains some seasons ago. "What
a remarkable memory for faces you
have, haven't you" MOTOR rings"
II wonder II he's really of any use
in the world" remarked the girl In
blue. ''oh. yes" replied the practical
girl in gray; "he can be used to make
other men jealous."-Chlcago Evening
Post.
Are you at all familiar with PlatoT".
asked Mrs. 0ldcastle. mo. that's one
thing Josiah always blames me for,
de says never make real close
friends with anybody. y."-Phlladelphla
Ledger.
Kate-Charley and Bessie are very
fond OF each other. Bertha-Rathes
spy they are both very fond OF Char
ley. 1t Is a case OF two souls with but
single thought, you know.-Boston
Transcript
Mamma-Why did you take little
brothers candy and eat 1t up? Why
didn't you ask him II you could have
III Little Alice-Why, did. mamma,
and he said couldn't"-Cincinnatl
Commercial Tribune.
He-I suppose you hold that man
should never deceive his wlfel She
oh, no, wouldn't go as far as that |
How would 1t be possible for the aver
age man to get a wife II he didn't de-
ceive herf-Boston Transcript.
Detained: Mrs. Smith-we missed |
you so much at our party! Mrs. Jones
And l was so vexed when couldn't
come! You see, our cook had company
Unexpectedly, and she needed us to fill
out the card tables.-Detroit Journal.
Hoping Against Hope: Gayboy (tIme
a. NIL say, old chap, isn't this lit.
tie late for you to be outf Aren't you
afraid your wife will miss your Enpeck
i hope she will, but she can throw
pretty straight for woman.-Chicago
News.
Mrs. Colls-And when you told him |
I was married did he seem to be sor-
ry1 Friend-Oh, yes; he said so quite
franklyI Mrs. Colls-Did he really? |
Friend-Yes, indeed-he said he was
extremely sorry, although he didn't
know the man personally!
mo, thank you," said Miss De Mure.
II don't care to meet any new young
men," "Myp exclaimed Miss Gaddie.
you are select all Of suddenv' NO"
replied Miss De Mure, glsncing dream.
lily at her new ring. "I've merely been
selected all of a sudden.-Philadelph
Press.
Another brute: Mrs. Pretty-Isn't 1t
stranger Mrs. Beautl has not put on
mourning for her husband. Mr.. Pret-
ty-I understand that her late hus-
band particularly requested that she
should not. Mrs. Pretty-The brute
suppose he knew how lovely she would
look In it.-PickMe-Up.
"You ought to have a place in grand
opera" remarked the sarcastic passen-
ger who was trying to read. "Oh,
don't know" replied the fat party
across the aisle, who was giving an
in,it alton of a song "I'ye got n'aco