The Saint Paul globe., 1904-05-28
men ARE ExACT|NG
WOMEN READILY ADAPT THEM
SELVES TO CIRCUMSTANCE
Men Want Hammers to Drive Taeks
and Secure Desks Upon Which to
Write-Women Put Up With Incon-
Venienees With No Murmurs.

2 -
If anybody should tell man to his
face that he was more fussy and ex-
acting than a woman, he would laugh
the idea to scorn. But it's true. Men
are the fussiest things in the world.
They donI adapt themselves easily to
circumstances They must have things
just so. Take for instance that horror
of a mans life house cleaning time.
He comes home, We'll say, to lunch
con, which he should never do at any
time. The house is in -uproar; car
pets and rugs on the line curtains
and pictures down, and he is requested
to eat his luncheon in the buffers pan
try or in the kitchen. Well, the state
of mind of that man is pitifuII The
pepper and salt are missing; he is
aghast! Eat his lunch without pep
per and salt? Why, it's out of the
question. His wife will know that
somewhere on. some shelf the salt and
pepper FOR the table have been put and
now are covered up. She can get along
without them. The man eats his lunch
with many signs and starts to his room
TO get his pipe just where he left it
last night. 1t is not there! The eX-
preston on his face is tragic. He new
er heard of anything so outrageous in
all his life as disturbing his things.
Where's the pipe? 1t must be found.
And where's his hat Gracious heav-
ems, his hat is not where he left it when
he came in! Absolute misery is now
depicted in his face. Nothing, not even
the death of his entire family, causes
a man the awful sorrow Of being sep
arated from his hat. He would like to
Iii IT. Tanarl
house cleaning business is going to end.
Where's his hat, and his pipe? He'll
dine at the club; he would like to know
if this is his house or somebody else's?
Then his wife finds hat and pipe, puts
one on his head the other in his
mouth. and asks him If he will kindly
go down town and remain there until
the house cleaning is over. When it's
all done he will tell ''the fellows what
wife he has, eVerything's clean at his
house! Dear, consistent man!
Then some day he will want to write
q note in a hurry and his wife tells him
TO sit right down at her desk He sits
Shakes the thing and finds it insecure;
tries the pens, can't write with any one
of them No blotters in sight, pen
wiper missing, paper is SO ridiculously
small. Ink is low; write at that shaky
desk with those bad pens on that alb
Surd paper? Where is q man to write?
Isn't there a decent desk in the entire
house? Writing q letter there is out
OF the question. How about woman
in a hurry? She can take a magazine,
put it on her lap, write a note there,
wave it in the air to dry it, tip the
bottle of ink up and use the little there
is in the bottom and get the note off in
ten minutes. Not so. my lord. Every
thing must be just so.
Suppose he wants to drive 2 tack
a nd
straight tack. He must select a spot
in the wall or wherever it's going and
then he must have a tack hammer Did
anyone ever hear of driving a tack
without a hammer. His wife drives all
her tacks with her curling tongs, or the
handle of the brush boom. When my
lord is offered the curling tongs to
drive in the tack, he simply roars and
its not with laughter either. Use that
-Well-that thing for tacks? Never
heard of a house before that hadn't a
tack hammer. What kind of a house
is this, anyway? His wife tells him
the hammer is-now supporting the left
leg of the ice chest which is a little
Shaky- and she says in a very dignified
way that she has been driving taclks
for three months with the tongs but if
he insists she will get the screw driver.
Nhereupon my lord proceeds to throw
another mt. Put in tack with a screw
driver! He did think his wife had
some sense. He'll be-wel, something
or other-if he'll drive any tacks in
such a house as this
Then his wife win very calmly take
the tack, drive it into the proper place,
pounding it with the tongs, while hus-
band looks on and says things. But
the wife does not say, Il told you So"
She gives husband a glance and he
goes out on the porch and smokes his
pipe. Such is man when caught and
domesticated. When woman has on