Decorah public opinion. (Decorah, Winneshiek County [Iowa]) 1895-1928, 1904-12-21
The Colonel's Guest
copyright, 1904, by T. C. McClure.l


looked under it as the most likely place
to find a strange cat. What he saw was
man instead Of cat, and, grabbing
for his big navy revolver and imagining
himself at the head of his old fight
ing regiment, he commanded:
"Now, then, you roll out here or I'll
blow your head off,
go little slow, colonel" replied the
man under the bed. 1--WE also got
gun, and the minute you stoop down
I'll send bullet into your eye"
You will, will you, you miserable
THEIR
II will, for sure, and l guess I'll
shoot at one of your legs as it is. 1
don't like the color of your pajamas."
Acting upon the impulse of the mo-
ment, the colonel sprang upon his bed,
but fifteen seconds later he was 50 mad
to the floor with the exclamation:
''Come out here, you rascal, or you
are dead man.
That's all bluff, colonel" said the
intruder with chuckle. Pull on your
trousers, if you are sober enough,
and take things easy"
The colonel obeyed. He obeyed be-
cause it suddenly struck him that he
didn't look dignified without trousers,
and because he would need them any
way when he collared the man and
walked him to the police station. He
then sat down, because his knees trem-
bled under him, and that very fact
made him boil over with anger and
chagrin. With the revolver pointed
under the bed, or as near so as he could
hold it, he continued:
"You internal scoundrel, what are
you doing here in my apartments-in
my bedroom?"
Robbery, colonel. That's my trade,
you know. l had pal with me, but
he took Off a bag of stuff while
stayed behind to investigate further.
When l heard you fumbling at the
front door crept under the bed here
get out that woke you up. l should
have been going through your clothes
in another minute"
''Then come out of that-cOme out,
l say!' Numbered the colonel as he
grew hotter all the time.
mot just yet, colonel-not hardly"
"Then I'll shoot you where you are"
mo, you won't, old man. The in
slant I see your legs moving I shall
open fire on them. From where you
sit your bullets can't reach me, while
have a dead sure thing on your legs.
Go slow, colonel"
ITS time l had the police in here
land had you out Of this. Here goesv'
Click! Click! 1t was the man under
the bed getting ready to fire on the
colonel's legs, and the colonel happily
realized it and fell back into his
chair.
There won't be any police called
in here before I'm gone,' said the
stranger in his cool. calm way. after
Pm out you can raise all the racket
you want to-"
''Ye gods, but must l put UP with
thisv' almost walled the man of war.
You must. l have been ready to
come out for ten minutes past and you
alone are to blame that Pm keeping
you up. Why not hold on to that pep
perry temper Of yours until we can
come to a pleasant understanding"
"Let a robber go after he has plum
dered me-"
That's what it must come to, colo
mel. AS a soldier, you see the situa-
ton. We have got each other by the
short hair, so to speak, and neither
Of us is happy over it. There may be
a question of honor involved, but l
think you'd better waive 1t. The plum
der carried off won't foot up $500, and
for that trifling sum you'd be an ass to
give yourself away to police and re-
porters and members Of your club.
Never give yourself away at cheap
price. Besides
Besides what?" snapped the colonel.
1.-The family honor, you know"
"What do you know about my fam
lily, sir?"
"A great deal, colonel. You had
brother George"
But he is dead"
well, hardly. He was supposed to
have died several years ago, but as a
matter Of fact he is very much alive to-
day. Indeed. colonel, he's the man who
carried Off the swag just before you
came in"
you are lying, sir! l won't believe
a word Of it,!
"Off your base again. Your brothers
middle name is Yates; light hair, blue
eyes, small hands, and there is scar
on his right cheek from a wound re-
ceived when a boy; also speaks with
lisp. Am / correct, colOnelT
Eyes, yes. Come out and tell me
morew whispered the colonel.
There's only this more to say" said
the man as he crept out and stood
erect. "Your brother has gone to the
dogs-that is, he is one of our gang.
He didn't know that this was your den.
of course, but he has helped to plumber
it, and If I'm jagged he'll get the same
dose and tho nuhljc will know his real