New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1904-04-17

You sentimental faddists say
That children ought to leaf away
At least till their eleventh year;
You let them dawdle up the Tree
That HH every fRia nfr ought ' to S be me
At work before its seventh year.
My aldermanic feelings boil
when | consider how you spoil
The brHts who should he taught to toll;
And learn gamble. smoke and tet.
Instead Of teaching, them to get
AS infants did in olden time
Il maddens me. this wasteful rulo.
That children mature should fOJt
Whole days away attending school.
Where nothing they arc taught to do,
Which only serve their heads TO trrn
And make their fierce ambitions burn
Long long before they ought to do.
When our great-grandsires were alive.
Were sent to labor in the hive
The youngsters grew industrious;
And by the time that they were at
Ia only lazy sleek and TAT.
Already were illustrious.
No idle hours their life dlsg1aced-
They did not cultivate taste
For muddy oahshness nor waste
From to night. with pick and spade.
They. piled the Golfers noble trade
The manly art Of picketng.
Thus exercised the liveIong day
In soul and body p;;0sr cred cred. they
To twelve ear-old seHility:
R RSt tS S1g c eygr to tools 8d IN haFd
The dignity of labor and
The virtue of utility. -Punch.
The Iowa Supreme Court has handed down an
opinion In favor of a certain Andrew McClurg. dea-
con of q Methodist Church in Valley Junction. Iowa.
against Mayor and chief OF police Of that town
whom he sued for damages, alleging they burst
into his house night and arrested him on the
theory that he was chicken thief because some
thoroughL-ed bloodhounds had followed a trail from
a henroost to the deacon's residence. In the lower
court the good deacons claim for damages was
thrown out or r. legal technicality, and also the
ground that the Mayor was justified in thinking the
dumb brutes' instinct might be relied The Su-
prene Court takes controry view. however. and
orders a new trial. Ten thousand dollars Is asked
by McClurg.
As to Pspularity.-"The man who wants be
popular must be 4 cheerfuI mar
II don't see why
Because man can gain popularity by telling
f Post people the truth ABOUT themselves ni'"S0
Spring in the allegory of the oldtime "specta-
tor" was represented clothed In a flowing
mantle of green silk interviewer with flowers, a
chapIet of roses his head and a narcissus in mis-
hand while volets and primroses sprang up under
his feet and all nature was revived and cheered
AT his approach In the entire aleScry mention
is made of snowfakes and overcOats, but. then.
spring would not be spring If It always the
same Its very changeabieness is half its charm.
A ROSE soNNET-wITH THoRNs.
Sweetheart, | bring n crimson rose to you.
Fragrant June. its heart with honey sweet.
The golden secret of my lave Repeat
The rhyme and make the fourth line end with true).
Be yours the voice to cheer it's day and bless
Its life with rapture. song ami q regret
That | must skip again tor happiness;
Close to your bosom. white set
1t shall make music for your heart q guess
I'll have to stop the climax. forgeO
-(FeliX Carmen in Smart Set.
THE Louisville HERALD tells story OF the ex-
periences of countryman with electric light.
showing the embarrassments of the present day
hotel to the rural mind. When Plus Whallen, of
Springfield. KY. came to Louisville hotel he saw
his first incandescent light. But he evinced no
great surprise. It not until he went TO his
room where the bellboy had already switched the
current, that he noticed there opening in
the circular globe. He blew upon II gently, and
was encouraged rather than disheartened TO find
that it didn't blow back. But the encouragement
turned to anger when a stronger Whit produced
no result whatever. Mr.. Whallen had strong
lungs he did his best. his Indignation increas-
ing with each effort. To his great relief he noticed
that the string by which the strange light
pended contained loop to shorten IT, The light
hung the dresser Mr.. Whallen let out the
loop and put the light in the top drawer of the
dresser. He closed the drawer and found to his
satisfaction that the in Stygian dark
ness So he lay down and slept peacefully with
light to annoy him.
Lady-Oh here cones steamer. How high she is
out of the waterl
Second Lady-Yes. dear. but don't you seer It's
because the tides SO low--Punch.