davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07
TRICKS OF THIEVES.
Clever Schemes That Aid In the Per.
petration of Crime.


petration OF Crime.
Thieves resort to clever methods in
order To get away with the goods" said
IN old police officer. and | am firmly
convinced that II the criminals of the
world would devote the same amount
of time. talent and patience TO think
ing out uplifting and advantageous
schemes Tor humankind they would
In short while reyolutionlze the world
In many useful ways. But somehow
the mind of the criminal seems to
be sharper. if may say 1t. and bright
er and quicker than the mind of the
honest man. The fact may be ex
planned in any number of ways. In
the first place, the criminal has moth
ing to do but think out some plan
Of getting something that doesn't be
long To hin That is his special bust
hess quite naturally the plan he
works out uuter those circumstances
will often startle even the oldest men
in the police departments of the coun
try Who would have thought of the
wire Saw, a thing ~ small that IL can
be slipped in between the layers of the
shoe sole. but the criminal who found
in it ready, convenient and unfalling
means of escape: He is constantly
thinking up some new scheme. Here
we tind man and woman in II jewelry
store The woman carries II parrot with
her. The bird suddenly gets away and
begins To tlutter around in the store
The jeweler is afraid the parrot will
break something. He tries to catch ii
and succeeds after II short while. \
small purchase is made. The man and
the woman leave. Result several hun
dred dollars worth of jewelry gone.
1t was stolen during the excitement
over the bird. Good scheme. eh? Yet
1t is but one out of million worked
by the clever degenerates OF the
world" New Orleans Times Demo
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07

Charles Reade found the hero of his
novel, The Wandering lIeir,' in the
person of Lord Altham of Ireland. who
was sold as "redemptioner' Mt rhila-
delphia in lT2S and who served for
twelve years in effect rs Il slave 10 one
or more masters in Lancaster county,
Pa The young nobleman was recog-
nized by two Irishmen who came by
accident to the house where he lived,
and Admiral Vernon afterward took
him back TO Ireland. Reade laid the
scene of Lord Altham'S servitude in
northern Delaware, but it is pretty well
established that this was an error
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07

Mrs. Nolan had made some disparag
ing remarks about the costume of her
husbands bosom friend. Mr.. lierlihy
and they were promptly resented
Ills hat is turning green wild age.
1T it" said Mr.. Nolan, with fine seorn
and his boots is rusty and cracked
lookin'.' did | hear We say? lAsten now
To me. Mary Nolan. II livery mans hat
an boots covered as warm a hearrt as
phelim lIeriihys there'd he more proud
wlmmiu Ia the worrld.''
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07
For Ladies.>

Toilet Cases in Sterling Silver Ebony Cocobolo Cellu-
lold, Metal and Stag-compete outfits also separate
pieces Desk Sets. Work Boxes, Manicure Sets, Writing
Tablets Sterling Silver Hat and Clothes Brushes all
Manicure Pieces. Hat Pins and very large assort-
ment OF Wrist Bags. Pocket Books Card Cases. Umbrel
las Imported Vases, Brica brac Table Sets Napkins
to match; Luncheon Cloths, Bureau and Side Board
Scarfs, Towels, and unusually fine line of Linen
Handkerchiefs, Furs Perfumery Gloves and Hosiery,
line of Cut Glass and Fancy China not equaled in
of the larger stores Candeabras and many other arti
cles that must be seen.
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07

What constitutes a gentleman
asked the very young man. = That IS
hard to say" replied the sage from
Sagcvillc, but its pretty safe bet
that the man who says he IS a gentleman
lSn't
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07
GootI rrainiug.

Miss Sightscer ON Egypt Mr., New
rich. You scale up these rocks as II
you'd been climbing pyramids all your
life, Wee you bred in the mountains?
Mr.. Newrich oh, no; but | carried II
hod up II two story ladder for COED
many years before struck oil DE
troit Free Press.
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07
Summit. etIc.

~ on look awfully tired. young man,
said the benevolent looking woman 10
the young man with the books under
his arm
"Yes. ma'am.. replied the student
I'm studying for Il doctor"
Its shnme Why don't You let
the doctor study for HIMSELF" Yon
kcrs Statesman.
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07
For Men

Military Brushes i'll Clothes and Hat Brushes in
Silver Ebony Cocobolo and Burnt Wood Shaving Sets
complete outfits in Safety Razors, Travelling Cases,
Bath Robes Gloves Pocket Books, Card Cases, Cigar
Cases Sterling Silver Match Safes, Penknives Neck
tie, Collar and Cuff Boxes Umbrellas Suspenders Neck
wear, Mems Jewery, Handkerchiefs, and FULL LINE
OF FURNISHING GOODS.
Bear in mind all new; old goods work
oil We cordially invite the and will gladly aid
selections.
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07
Snue CnunscI.

"You want n piece er edvice fer yo'
llfetimeF"
Il sho' does
We'll. den, don't ever try ter whip
de devil roun' de stump. Yo' cloze is
boun' ter ketch tire. en- you'll burn up
befo' yo' time" Atlanta Constitution.
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07

"He is gone" she walled He Is
gone forever"
Don't lie Gowneast," her friend
urged. He may come back"
NO. no; shall never see him again.
gave up the letters he had written TO
me Chicago Record Herald
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07
To Glenn Up silver.

"They say alcohol will clean silver
up nicely" remarked the man who nc.
quires facts.
ut will" agreed the red nosed indI-
vidual. 1T cleaned up all my silver"
Philadelphia Record.
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07
Christmas. Christmas.

Christmas buying The Christmas buyers,
think this year Others We feel it impossible 10 give de-
tails this is simply invitation visit the store whether
when say that greatest Christ
gifts we have shown We believe they exclusive
they are fine We mention remind you the
articles You may find in assortment
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07

Mr. Roosevelt, just before the elect
ION, stated that every man would get
square deal" Judge Parker was the
hast one To get his.
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07

The spinning wheel and the tax
wheel are still found in the Irish cot
tageS. where many n girl has her wed
ding dowry of linen and homespun
made at home. Although 1t is more
the task of the older women. there are
still girls who do their spinning stint
and lay by a certain amount for their
wedding outfit. \ pleasant sight 1t is
to see the elderly women outside their
cottage doors spinning the flax or the
wool As long as the weather is warm
the sturdy lrishwoman, old or young,
scorns roof except to sleep under.
The free air and sunshine are her
choice aud the sweet sky is the fair
est roof
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07

In the reign Of George Ill. hats We're
taxed. The least tax was threepence.
Those above l. shll.lngs In value paid
tax OF > shillings.
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07
HnA Her Annette.

Harry Molly, YOU look good enough
to eat Molly All YOU have to do Is
ask me to dine III do the eating all
right Boston Transcript
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07

Caller Go9a.pg "a pi.turel Does your
mamma paint: Lite Son Yes. but
she's through with That an is putin
on the poWGcr now. She'll be down in
n minute
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07
Ani,t..lirf d.

Jackson tolls me lie last thing he
wrote was accepted Do yDu know
what il vas
Yes: his resignation" London NIL,
lion
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07
The Rctnrt Cau.tic,

Mr. Sapeigh | spent last evening In
the company Of the one | love best In
all the world. Miss Pert Indeed! And
weren't you tired of being slone?-Il-
lustrated Bits.
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07
I.Nen Then.

Think twi,e hetore YOU speak, and
even then nine times out of ten the
world won't lpse anything if you keep
still.-SomerVille journal.
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07
BLOOD CELLS.


Man is a millionaire many times over in
the possession of blood cells Women is
not quite SO rich. for scientists have proven
that the normal number of red blood cells
III adult men is iive million; i'll women four
and half million, to the square mllmeter
The normal cell is not absolutely round
i'll health, but, i'll disease, becomes eX-
tremcly irregular i'll shape. Every one can
be iii perfect health and possess the mil
lions of rich red blood corpuSClcs II they
only know how to go about ii. Dr. X V
Pierce, consulting physician to the luva-
lids Hotel and Surgical Institute. at Buf-
ialo, N V, advises every man and woman
to prepare for long life by observing ma
ture's laws In the first place il your
digestion is faulty, and the food YOU
eat is not taken up by the blood and assim-
Hated properly, you need a tonic and dges
tive correctot, something that will increase
the red blood corpuscles; he believes in
going about this i'll natures own way
Years ago, i'll his active practice, he found
that an Alternative extract of certain herbs
and roots, put up without the use of alco-
hol, would put the liver, lungs and heart
into fuller and more complete action. This
medicine he called Or. Piercc's Golden
Medical Discovery. BY assimilating the
food eaten. il uourishes the blood. and, III
stead of the i'll shaped corpusclcs, the per
sons blood takes ON rich red color and
the corpusclcs are more nearly round
Nervousness is only the cry of the starved
nerves for food. and when the nerves are
fed ON rich red blood the person loses
those irritable feelings, sleeps wol at night
and feels refreshed iii the morning.
KNowLEDGE is powIR
II you want to know about your body,
read Dr Pierce's Common Sense Medical
Adviser. which can be had for the cost of
mailing u cents in one cent stamps tor the
cloth-bouud book. OF 81 stamps for the
paper covered volume. IooS PAGES Ad-
dress DIR. X. V Pierce, Buffalo, \ Y.
Or Pierce's Pleasant Pellets cleanse the
bowels and stimulate the sluggish liver.
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07

NOTEUness otherwise stated the above positions for males only
For address p L. lEVAN, Broad
Street Bank Building, Trenton, n.
Write and address plainly
WANTEDFor u Army, able bodied unmarried men between
United States good character habits
speak, and English For information apply Recruiting
Officer, Broad and Front SITS, Trenton, N. J
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07

Rats and ..onaurr9.s must expect no
mercy in misfortune. cotton.
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07
KNowLEpeE is POWER
NEW ADVERTISEMENTS.
Christmas

Nearly here and you are think
ing Just what would be a Suita-
bic gift for some one of your
many friends. Just a word !:
A bottle Of good extract is
alwa Is appreciated and you
wiH find a good assortment of
the finest perfumes to be had
in the city here, and the prices
to suit the times. Gail and
look them 0uer.
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07

The florist may lose cutomers if he
cnltivates toe many whiskey blossoms.
The Lambertville record., 1904-12-07

The flirting of the girl of the period
seldom comes to full stop.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1904-01-15
SWANEE RIVER.

Well, well, Xmas Is now a thing of
the past; but, of course, ID. o. c. had his
usual good time.
We attended Molusk Hall on Xmas
night. A large crowd was In attend
ance, the performance was extra good
aud the supper better still.
We next took flight for Lebanon
church entertainment, where Gods
chosen crowd always assemblies, and
on this occasion the church would not
hold them. After spending the night
We packed in on a fox chase aud
rounded up in Tslleytown, where our
attention was called to a two-story rab-
bit box, made in double B shape, with
six folding doors. 1t would catch and
hold lion or wild cat We got snap
shot OF 1t, and ON we went. We caught
four foxes In three days and ran the fifth
one In a mill pond which the natives
called the Dead Sea.
We next clubbed In on a shootinp
match at Merry Point, where twelve
large turkeys, nine geese and q big OK
were shot off. Twenty-Five white men
were In this contest. We could have
won the OK. but he was too poor to walk
to Swanee, so We undershot the mark
and left the beef on the Point.
We will tell you where the fun comes
In next week as We are busy at present
skating on Crowbsr Alley Lake.
Success to your paper and its many
readers. d. o. C. & Co.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1904-01-15
FLEETS BAY.

q. w. Cutler, sr spent the HOLIDAYS
with relatives and friends IN Accomac
county.
Clifford Flippo was visitor at bis
pleasant home recently.
Miss Helyn Fltchett attended a reeep.
tion at Mathews q. H. during Xmas.
Miss Ruth Cutler, who has been in
Roanoke the past season, arrived home
Tuesday, the 9th inst, to the delight of
her friends here.
Virgil Fi;chett Is with us again after a
short absence.
Lloyd Barnett was pleasant visitor
atthe home Of Wilbur Davis a short time
ago.
Miss Lizzie Edmonds Is spending some
time at her parental home near here.
Misses Laura and Fanny Hughlett and
brothers, Fitzhugh aud Hiram, have
been spending some time at their home
near here. The boys have returned TO
Baltimore.
Misses Beulah and Annie Ingram are
visiting the Misses Hughlett.
The boys and girls Of this place were
highly entertained at the home Of Mr..
aud Mrs. ID. p. Fitchett on Friday night
before last.
Miss Ella Cutler has resumed Ter
school dulles, after a pleasant week with
friends here
Peranus Galloway, a colored man
here, had the misfortune to lose his horse
recently. IpLER.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1904-01-15
LABORrN wEsTMoRELAND

Some of the timber dealers in the
county are offering rs cents per cord
for saving pine wood, and then they
are experiencing trouble in having
the work done. There are many OF
the colored people in this county
idle while every day there is plenty
of work for them. We are very
much in need of labor, but it seems
very hard to get it from the colored
population. As soon as they have
earned four or five dollars they feel
that they are rich, and will not work
until they are compelled to do so. Of
course, there are exceptions to this
rule, for we have some very enter
prising colored citizens in the county.
They deserve much credit. The
colored people have many opportuni-
ties if they would only improve them.
We don't hear anything now about
the Northern Neck Immigration AS
sociation. Has it completed its
work, or has it become discouraged?
STAR.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1904-01-15
The Odds We Fought.

These figures were prepared by
Col. Walter II. Taylor, who was
Lees Acknowledgements and had a
precise knowledge of Lees numbers,
as all official reports passed through
his hands. After the war he had
access to the like reports of the Fed.
ersl army in the archives at Wash
ington.
Seven-days' battle around Rich.
mond: Confederate army, SO,762;
Federal, 10000; Federal excess
14,22S. Second Manassas Confed-
crate, 49.077; Federal, $4,000; Fed.
eral excess, 25,501. Sharpsburp
Confederate, 35,255; Federal, 81.
164; Federal excess, 51,9O9. Fred
ericksburg: Confederate, 7S,22S;
Federal, 100000; Federal excess,
21.772. Charlottesville: Confed.
crate, $4,000; Federal, 1900; Fed.
eral excess 10000 Gettysburg.
Confederate, $4,000; Federal, 1o5,.
600; Federal excess, $4,000. Cam.
paign of 1864: Confederate, 63.9S4;
Federal, 141.160; Federal excess, ~.
176.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1904-01-15

any for shade. The hazel, too, bears
valuable nuts and the muscadine
grape, when set around the edge of a
field, is prolific and of such quality
that if the children find them when
ripe none are likely to go to waste,
and it is also found that excellent {
wine can be made from them.
For the benefit of those who spec
tally fancy keeping "roguish" stock
around we will say that the proper
height at which gaps and fences
should be kept is from two to three
feet. 1t is our observation that the
result is always satisfactory.
Miskimon, Va. u. k.G.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1904-01-15
PETER MONTAGUE's MONUMENT.

A monument for Peter Montague
the pioneer of the Montague family
OF Virginia, has been made by Cad.
dessN Bros, of Baltimore and will bs
erected in Lancaster county, Va. II
was ordered by Mrs. Mary s. Speer
OF Pittsburg, Pa, and is being
erected by the members of the Mon.
tague family in all parts of the coun
try. The monument was to have
been erected In October of the present
year, but was delayed until spring
The monument is of Quincy granite
and the inscription is:
In Memory Of
Our Pioneer Ancestor
Peter Montague,
Born In England,
1908, tA
Died 10 Lancaster County, Va.
1869.
Emigrated In Company with
Sir Francis Wyatt
on Ship Charles
Landing at Jamestown,
October, 1921,
He soon became influential
In the colony and
Represented Lancaster County
In the House of Burgesses,
1651-1668.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1904-01-15
JEST DON'T 60 GIrrlN' SORRY
Jest don't go gittln' sorry for yourselfI

Jest don't go gitt!n' sorry for yourselfl
Smallpox Is bad--self-pity's even wuss
An It's amszin' how a grievance grows
Ifyou take time its snsky head to nuss
Jest don't 60 gittin' sorry for yourself
Anthat you're bearin' lots Of folks must
bear;
Jest turn to huntin' blessin's, an you'll
find
Them shinin' things is growin' every
wherei
So don't go gittin' sorry for yourselfi
But keep on climbIn; fortunes little
shelf
That holds the jam seems far of, but 1t
ain't--
Unless you go s-pityin' yourself
Clinton Daaqsrfeld.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1904-01-15
lFor the CrrrzzNI

An experienced orchardist thinks
that the damson is the most profit.
able of fruits. This fruit, to succeed
requires good land and cultivation.
AS regards persimmons, they would
very likely find q ready market if
thoroughly ripe ones, only were
offered. They are sweeter even than
the fig.
1t is the opinion of many that
the most profitable apple for this
section is the Cat Head. 1t yields
better than any other and sells
equally as we'll. II seeus to be
peculiar to this seotion and, there
fore. adapted to it. The only way
to obtain them at present ia ia
propagate them yourself, 'as they
cannot be had Of any of the nur-
series, so far as ia known to the
writer.
1t is likely that in a few months
our farmers will be fertilizing their
fields from 8 viol that can be car
rled in the vest pocket. 1t is done
by means of microbes which, when
inserted in the soil, multiply like
yeast. The u. S. Government is
preparing to produce the microbes.
which it will send out to be tested
by the farmers. 49,
In response to number of in-
quiries as to where improved varie-
ties of peach trees can be bought
for 4 cents apiece and apple trees
for 8 cents, We will say that we have
been dealing with j. G.. Harrison g.
Sons, of Berlin, Md.
1t is easy to see that our native
trees are not properly appreciated
for purposes of ornament and shade.
1t is difficult to see wherein they
are inferior to the nursery grown
kinds which are sold at fancy prices.
For instance, we have the black
walnut. a stately tree, valuable for
its timber and fruit; gum; scarlet
oak and dogwood, giving beautiful
crimson foliage in autumn; the
beech, dense shade, and said to be
immune from lightning; also the
mulberry, poplar, red maple, all
graceful growers and the equal of
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1904-01-15
ITEMS OF TNTEREsT.

A good newspaper, like a paper of
hrst class pins, is full of nice head
lngs and good points.
The President has named VIM. H.
Taft, Governor general of the Phil
lppines, to become Secretary of war.
"Women DONE change politics so
much as politics change women" is
the epigrammatic conclusion on the
suffrage experiment in Colorado.
Many of the couples married in
Virginia since the 18th of December,
when marriage licenses issued by
county court clerks became. inyali d.
have secured other licenses from cir
cult court clerks and been married
the second time to make sure.
Richmond had a big Christmas
blaze. The Gallego Mills, one of
the largest flour milling plants in
the South, and the tallest building
IN Richmond, was destroyed by fire
Sunday morning. The structure
cost $3.50, 900, but was insured. The
loss on contents OF the mills will fall
under $4,000.
A SUPPOSED corpse of a colored
man in West Virgins Mortified the
watchers and the family the other
day by getting up from the "cooling
board" and walking about the room.
The watchers made their escape by
the door, while the son-in-lsw went
through window, carrying the sash
with him. The supposed dead man,
while very old, says he expects to
live a long time yet and does not
like the foolishness that had been
going on about his premises.
Senator Martin is making a big
effort to have the govern ment reim-
burse property owners for damage
during the Civil war. Among Others
ne has introduced the following bills:
For the relief of Andrews Chapel.
Stafford county; Berea Baptist
church, Stafford county; Mt. Olivet
Protestant Methodist church, Alex
andria county; Chestnut Fork Old
School, Baptist church, Culpeper
county; st. Stephens Protestant
Episcopal church, Culpeper county;
st. Paul's Episcopal church, of Gull
peper county; Rudley Methodist
church, South, Prince William coun-
ty; r. II. Hayden, &C.; Black Lick
church. of Fairfax county; Gulpeper
Baptist church, Culpeper county;
Calvary Protestant church, of Gull
pepper county; Oulpeper Methodist
church, South; st. Marks Episcopal
church, of Fairfax county; Aqua
creek church, and others.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1904-01-15
THE HOLLY BALL.
For the VIRGINIA CIrizES.l

For the VIRGINIA CITizENJ
Last night dreamed about ball,
Twas held within the old town hall
And holly ropes were swung with grace
Over the whole enchanted place.
1t seemed to change 10 fairylsnd-
1 saw around me wood nymphs stand
And naiads fresh from out the sea
Appeared to join the jubilee.
And little elf-men in row
Went up and cast vote you know
Then one fat goblin rose and said
Some verses that I've often read.
Then on dear Fairy Bessie's head
A holly crown lac gently laid,
And all bowed low In reverence sweet
Their new, elected queen to greet.
No sooner was this over than
A real good old time dance began.
o, such lovely sight did seem
Too good to only be dream.
And yet when e'er L see that hall
'Twillalways to my memory call
That charming picture of the past
AS long as life endures to last.
RBD-ToP.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1904-01-15
MILLENRENK

Quite number of our young people
attended the Holly Ball and Leap Year
Hop at Lancaster.
Miss Marian Towles spent the holi-
days at her home at Towles' Point.
q. s. Towles, of Reedville, called on
his many friends at his old home during
Christmas.
Miss Alice K. Blakemore, who spent
the holidays at her parental home.
"hosedale," has returned to Farmville
to resume her studies.
Messrs. w. g. Chowning, of Maryland
University. and George s. Gresham, of
White Stone. were pleasant guests in
this neighborhood recently.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1904-01-15
THE EDITOR WILL GET ALONG.

A Missouri editor who is about to
pull up and leave for lack of sup
port sarcastically remarks in parting
that editors don't need money.
"Don't worry about the editor" he
says, she has charter from the
State to act as doormat for the COM
munity. He'll get the paper out
someway, and stand up for you
when you run for office, and !, lie
about your pigeon-toed daughters
tackey wedding, and blow about
your big-footed sons when they get
a $5.a-week job, and weep over
your shriveled soul when it is released
from your grasping body, and smile
at your giddy wife's second mar
riage. He'll get along. The Lord
only knows how-but the editor will
get there somehow"