Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1904-03-24

Gay nlgnt, Wnen lew on tine stage, IN tine
town hall, held s'Spinster's Convention
for the delectation Of the few off the stage.
The latter few filled the hall to overlooking,
however. I have not seen Spinster's
Conyentionn before, but feel sure that it
is only in Thorofare that the same number
of women can be found equal to the task Of
making themselves look the veritable old
maid without losing their charm Of man
ner and expression, and at the same time
giving a picturesque effect to the individ
nal, as we'll as to the play. 1t will be inn
possible to tell how all these fair maidens
of sixty were dressed, nor what they all
said. The theme was, Man, lovely
Man r''--and, being women, they said a
great deal, and said it we'll, with appro-
pirate gestures. In fact, gestures were the
strong point OF the evening. Mrs. Fannie
MurreIl carried out her part extremely
WELL thought. Mrs. Emma Wilkins, the
exponent of dress reform, added dignity
and grace to the cause, and Mrs. Mary r.
Low said great deal which was, don't
doubt, of great use TO the fair ones in
search OF husband, and very entertaining
to the audience Mrs. Rebecca Gleason,
also, had dressed her part we'll, and played
it well throughout. The fun came in with
had machine which would change sixty
years or-more, into any desired being;
but sweet sixteen and beauty, combined,
were his strong points After he had ex-
pounded the merits of his machine, the
ladies were all anxious to try it, and The
first to enter, having given her true age,
which was the only guarantee against harm,
or the failure of her wishes, expressed the
desire to become very pretty little girl.
The crank turned the woman howled,
and in minute more, Maggie Gibbs, look
ing like dainty snowdrift, stepped to the
front of the stage, and recited in her own de-
lightful way, little moroccan, which told
about the beaux she meant to have when she
was grown up. Another, who went in, asked
to be beautiful young girl, and it was
Miss Kizzie Wilkins who emerged from the
machine, and sang lovely little song, very
sweetly. She emphasized the refrain with
some pretty movements of the hands and
body, and some graceful steps. The whole
effect was graceful and charming. One
lady wished to be young and pretty, and a
twin, or twins, but she was told that it
would take two to make twins, so she
being very short, chose the tallest woman
in the ranks, and they came out the Misses
May and Alice Gibbs the loveliest twins in
Thorofare, or-anywhere, and gave us de-
lightful duet on the piano. In response to
the wish of someone Miss May Gleason
appeared upon the stage, as sweet-sixteen
butterfly, and told, in a short recitation
how she meant to have, and keep beaux
In response to the wish of another, Miss
Laura DeHart appeared and gave us some
choice selections upon the piano. Then
came Mrs. Ella Phifer with her dog. She
had dressed her part to perfection, and
looked, altogether, the old maid which she
lis not; but she could not be separated
from her dog, which was all tied up with
red ribbons, and insisted that he should go
into the machine with her, and he went.
Mrs. Phifer wished to be prima donna,
and Miss Banks appeared, and sang coon
song; to the refrain Of which she accompan-
led herself with poetical movements of the
arms and feet. At any rate they were in
harmony with the music, and added to the
general effect. The dog appeared lin two
strings of sausages, tied with red ribbon.
That must have been grand thing in the
eyes of dog who had expected nothing
ness. Next, the dress reform woman wish
ed to be man, and was told that it took
two women to make one man. This aston
ished the sisterhood, who had thought that
it took two men to make one woman How
ever, the pressure of the times lead them to
amalgamate, with the result that Mr.. Ed
ward Shirk appeared before us and sang
some song, in his best voice, suitable to the
occasion. Mrs. Julia Gibbs, who had
dressed her part beautifully for fifty or
Whereabouts, gave her age as forty-fve, and
came out Of the machine exactly as she
went in; but think what torture woman
must go through before she can be pre-
vailed upon to tell her exact age I know
how it is, myself, And then, the Presi-
dent wished to go through the mill. /
haven't said much about the President be-
cause the Scripture has said the first shall
be last, but thought her general makeup
was the first of its class. She looked old,
but not made up'' old OF course, we all
knew that she lacked many years Of being
so old as she looked, but we amused our
selves by thinking that she might some
day look somewhat as she looked now.
Her face was the only one which seemed to
predict its own future possibilities. She
looked just the person to be the President
of such an organization. She is Mrs
Rachel DeHart Wilkins, and when she de-
cided to go through the machine, she, with
the look Of truthful dignity on her face,
which all presidents should wear, declared
that she was twenty, and when the profess
sor demonstrated she held to it. Finally,
with many admonitions the professor allow
ed her to enter the machine and as soon as
the crank began to turn there was grand
explosion, and the air was filed with flying
whale-bone and artificial teeth and other
Injuries. This had untitled the machine
for further use, and the other old maids re-
manned as they were, tits supposed Some
of them could not have been much inn
proved. Mrs. Eva Lodge looked very sweet
and quaint in her old woman's costume,
and the garb of an elderly quakeress was
very becoming to Mrs. Ida Heritage. The
was in all respects success.
It is greatly to the satisfaction of the
Thorofare people that Conference has, in
it's wisdom, left the Rev. George S. John
son with them during another year.
The Rev. VIM. Stone whom Thorofara |