Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1904-01-29
Presented the case 10 them.

"I'll see you further first" he cried.
"Twas you that started the row and
the trouble, and you can get out OF 1t
as you like"
"This is rank rnut'ny," said the skip
per, "and you could be Jung for refusin'
duty. But under the painful nash'na!
circumstances you can retire to your
cabin and be your own bloomin' police
man till peace is restored, when III
try and sentence you you ruin and
scuttle swine you. - ss,.
"Oh, that's all right" said the mate
contemporary.
& "Now. men," said the skipper thick
", "what wants is 'earty support.
Who'll volunteer for to be hambassa-
dor?" #
The crew looked at each other ard
shook their heads! They scufiled with
uneasy feet on the 1opsided deck.
They're standin' upon the i'll as
thick as pea-sticks,' said one Of the
boys.
Speak hup," roared the skipper. !.
The crew showed old Mac In front.
We've reyolved the notion up and
over" said Mac, "and we've come to
the conclusion, sir, there amt nothin'
to be got by sendin' ignorant men like
me on such errands.
The skipper hiccupped angrlly.
who Asted you to think? But
amt the man to press unwilling lub-
bers into goin' aloft. l can lead the
way. Go into the fo'castle. you dogs,
and consider yourselves under arrest.
Col"
"Blimy," said the crowd, "but we're
all in our own custody, SO we are. Now
what's the old man goin' to dO?"
They watched him from the fo'cas'
tie as he staggered into his own part
of the ship.
"Tll be my own hambassador," said
Jones. 'I'll show 'em 'ow to work
things with dignity; I'll show that ass
Lampert what's o'clock. What you
wants in such cases made and pro
vided is tact, and go, and innerds. In
nerds is the chief need. Why fight II
palaver'll do? Where was wrong
was to send galoot like Simcox. But
what could do but work the best
with the tools 'ad? II I'd gone my
self. we'd made peace afore there was
a row..
He came staggering ont of the cabin
with . case of brandy and laid 1t on
the after capstan. e.
s.rs guess III have a boy" said
Jones. ERE, you scum. send me
Billy" And Billy came att.
II release you temp-ry without bail,
said the skipper flercely, 80 puckalow
that case and foller me. No, you wait
till gets tablecloth as a signal I'm
willfn' to ave peace"
When he came out with cloth he
went ashore and stumbled up the hill
followed by the boy Bay, bearing the
case Of brandy. He found the crew
Of the Frenchmen lining the crest and
heard them talk.
"Say, Johnny French" said ole
Jones, III you wants war, prepare fol
peace. Who's the captain?"
"Sapristi!" said the French captain
Jones nodded.
"Give 1t lip, old son. It warn't my
fault, IL relyin' on the discretion Of am
bassadors amt a, fault; and maybe
YOU can swaller the hultlmatum will
some real good brandy throwed In
And Is your name Saprlsti?"
Nom de Dieu began the
Frenchman, but Jones waved his hant
| with dignity.
.Call yourself what you like. bu,
ave you got anything In the way of {
marlinspike or a splice bar ash oper
this yer case?"
The foreigners, perceiving that the
Englishman was on an Grrand o.
peace, gathered about the case and
soon discovered from the stencilet
inscription that It at any rate pretend
ed to come from COgnac.
'Goddam."' said the little red -cappet
Frenchman who. had flrst discoyaDet
them. "Cognac! ! spik Bnglish- bran
dee, Por'smout', Lon-don!"
Jonos made signs that he presented
The case 70 them