davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
It Would Seem So.

TRUTH" remarked the moralizer, iii
stranger than fiction"
"Yes," rejoined the demoralizer, and
the majority Of men seem to be shy Of
associating with strangers"
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
Not Up-to-Date.

"He has a promising future. He's a
very eloquent young preacher"
'0h, he's too old-fashioned. He will
Insist upon taking his texts from the
Bible. e."-Philadelphia Press.
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
Forre of Habit,

81 appreciate the fact that you have
honored me with proposal" i" said the
dear girl, but are you sure your love
for me is the real thingy"
Perhaps not" frankly replied the
young drug clerk, "but 1t Is less expen-
sive and just as good"
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

opportunity to shake
off a little Of the
obscurlty which has )
for some time en-
veloped the Bour-
bon princes. lie
FASTENED to st. Fe-
tersburg and Of
fered his services
to the Czar. They
were accepted, and
Don Jaime Is now
an officer In the
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
Abseut.Minded.

Mrs. Schoppen--I want rve pounds
OF sugar, please.
Grocer-Yes'm; anything elsep
Mrs. Schoppen-No. that's all; I'll
take it with me II 1t isn't too heavy a
package
Grocer-oh, itll only weigh three or
four pounds. ma'am.-Philadelphia
Press
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
Prudent Boss.

The contractor frownsd up at the
bricklayer sitting dangerously near the
edge Of the scafrold.
Git or av thor. Thomas Murphyr'
he finally beloved. First thing OF
know We viii fall tin stories, break yex
poipe avn want an hour to so out avn
buy a new one"
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

Russian army in the Far East. The
prince is in his thirty fourth year, and
has been given little chance to distln-
guish himself. He is heir to his fa-
theirs pretenslons to the Spanish
throne.
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
Astingy Woman.

Employment Agent-Why did you
leave Mrs. Goodsoul so soonf She Is
said to be q very nice woman.
Domestic-Nicel She's that stingy she
begrudges the very air ye breathe.
"You amaze me-"
"Judge fer y'rself. Kerosene Isn't
worth over twelve cents a gallon, Is itI''
"No"
swell, she most had a ct cause
started to pour q few drops Of 1t In tn
kitchen stove"
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
Never Called Down.

HoaxAOld Adam had one advantage
over the modern after-dinner speaker.
Joax-What was that?
Hoax-After he had finished no man
ever said, II always did like that
story"
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
What Did She NfannH

IF you feel chilly" said be. as they
strolled, remember have your shawl
here on my arm"
You might put 1t around me-" she
said, demurely,-Philadel Press.
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

was en- route 10
Abysslnia when he
disappeared, He
was a passenger on
the Kaiser Wilhelm
H., and was miss.
ed when the boat
reached Bremen on
the night OF June
10 last. Next day
when passengers
landed at Ply.
mouth hH was not
WNHHaa
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
An Ear-splitter.

"we've got dandy college yell now. "
"What is it?"
1--WE give four Russian battleships, a
siss-boom-ah, and then two Jap generals. "
Puck.
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
should Have Known Better.

"What was the trouble between
Josher and his wife2"
"She stated that certain young
lady of their acquaintance was the
handsomest girl In town, and he
agreed with her."-Butte Inter Noun.
tain.
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
I,ove In a Flat.

why does Harker look 80 cross
these daysT
Hes married and has three little
ones"
II don't see why three children
should put him in a bad humor."
"Who said anything about children /
He is married and has three little
rooms"
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
I'm to Her.

What would you do If 1 were to
die?" asked the bride of six months
That's for you to say, my dear" re-
piled the other half of the sketch.
(which would you prefer-burial or
cremationW
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

shining lights Of
the temperance
cause. He is past
his Goth year and
for more than n
generation ha s
been engaged in
booming Prohibi-
ton. He made n
phenomenal run
for Treasurer of
Pennsylvania at
one time, receiving
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
Friendly Suggestion,

"My heart is still untenanted," sigh
ed the slender summer girl.
"Why don't you write on your card
Flat to letT" asked her plump cous.
in, who was wearing a broad smile
and q new engagement ring.
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
He Read II.

The Deaf and Dumb Beggar-A
friend told me this morning that the
police are going to stop begging on the
streets.
The Blind Beggar-Yes; l read that
In the paper yesterday.
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
OUR BUDGET OF FUN.
HUMOROUS SAYINGS AND Do
INGS HERE AND THERE.

Jokes and JOkeIets that Are Supposed
to Have Been Recently Born-Sayinxs
and Doings that Are Old, Curious and
Lauxhable-The week's Humor.
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

fiTc Permanently Uured. NO nts or nervousness
EltO amer first day of DR.. .Klines Great Nerve
eestorer send for Free 82 trAlbottle and treatise
Dg. R. II. Kline. Ltd. eS Arch St.. Philadelphia, Pa
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
Advice.

Anybody kin give advice" said Un-
Gle Eben, "but 1t takes right smart
man to pick out de right kind an take
it"-Washington Star.
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
Undoubtedly.

What is your idea Of a successful
manT' asked the youth.
"A successful man." replied the sage,
els one who succeeds in making others
think as well Of him as he thinks Of him.
self"
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
Given a Raise.

With tender hands they took him
from the topmost branches OF a tail
pine.
What happenedY he gasped feebly.
You were tossed by a BULL" they
responded.
Then it's not 80 bad. l thought |
was tossed by a racing automobile"
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
Trials of Cunid.

Yes" related the romantic young
man. "as we sat on the park bench l
leaned over and planted kiss on her
ruby lips"
PLANTED, ehT remarked the bufroon
friend. did you raise anything"
"YCs. A policeman saw me and
soon afterward had to raise $40 fol
a fine"
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

Blggs-Did you ever notice what Il
healthy looking man Or. Pellet isl
Diggs-Yes; he looks so different
from his patients. wonder who his
nhysician isl
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
Himself and Auothsr

Him-There are two men Of my &C.
quaintance whom really admire.
Her-Indeed! And what is the name
Of the other one7
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

mis-, who was brother OF Assistant Sec.
retary OF State Isoomls. was William
II. Ella, q colored man. L0omis was
carrying to Emperor MenelIk com.
merclal treaty just concluded between
the United States and Ahysslnla. 1t
has been alleged that Ellis possesses
peculiar influence over Menclik, and
that he has a desire TO become ruler
OF Abyssinia. He is reported to have
told friends In New York before he
sailed with Loomls that he expected
within two years to have control of
$3.50, ,000, 900 and Of the richest country
In Africa.
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

the public schools JAMES II. PEABODY.
and as young man was noted ath.
lete. For a time Governor Peabody
worked as dry goods clerk In Bos-
ton, later going to Colorado lie set.
tied in Canyon City, his present home,
and engaged in mercantile business,
Fortune favored him, and In 1885 he
became q banker,
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

Dry stockings are provided In the
schools OF Rhenlsh Prussia for the pupils
who arrive there with wet feet.
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
.keeley uOUo RPHlNE-ToRAcco
NGH-S iiADlTS PERMANENTLY CURED
- FOR FULL PARTICULARS -
AaoARs1 M fkEElEfRlSnUTE. P0RTLANn. ORE

The British Museum contains records
and books written on bricks, oyster shells,
bones and tlat stones, and manuscripts on
bark, ivory. leather, lead, iron, copper
and wood.
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

"Yes. We found the baby playing
with a volume Of verse"
Indeed? He will probably turn out
to be poet"
But he tore the verses up and
tossed them out Of the window"
Did, ehl Well, that shows he's 80,
ing to be an editor"
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

began to be stirred
by the miners
strike that has
since resulted In
many deaths, riots,
court controversies
and crimes OF va
rious degrees, Gov
ernor Peabody is Il
native OF Vermont
and Is 81 years old.
He was educated In
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

Mothers will find Mrs. Winslows's Soothing
Syrup the best remedy to use for their children
during the teething period.
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
such Dear Friends, Too

S0Nh D~1A AA~AASf ASS
Clara-l'll tell you secret, dear, II
you'll promise never to repeat Ia.
Maude-All right Out with it
Clara-Fred proposed to me last
night.
Maude-Oh, say, doesn't he do 1t
awkwardly, though?
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

For bronchial trourles try Piso's Cure
for Consumption. 1t is a good cough
medicine. At druggists, price 25 cents.
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

knowledge and Experience.
She-What is silent partner?
Heidi you ever dance with @
deaf-and-dumb mann
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

WiIlie-Why! grandma, are you 60
ing home? Papa just said yesterday
that he thought you were going to stay
forever.
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

Professor Goldwin Smith, who IA.
Vors a home rule parliament for Ire,
land, Is a celebrated historian and es.
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

lated poisons, Eczema at
tacks with redoubled vio-
lenee, and the sufferer is al
most distracted by the fear
full itching and burning. 1t
is the most uncomfortable
and aggravating of all skin
eruptions and a terror in
warm weather.
Local remedies give tenn
porary ease, but as Eczema
Is not due to outside causes,
but to a disordered condi-
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

Frederick Kent Loomis, whose body
has been found In Bigbury Bay, 10
miles southeast OF Plymouth, England,
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

history at Oxford for eight years, and
later was honorary professor of Eng.
lish and constitutional history at Cor.
nell. Professor Smith Is an advocate
Of reciprocity between the United
States and Canada, and during the
civil war was an active champion Of
the North.
-
The nominee of the ProhibitIonIsts
for President Is Silas c. Swallow, OF
Pennsylvania. Swallow Is one OF the
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
On the IeraeY Cnaat.

I'm not going to remain at this
hotel another night"
What's the troubleT"
why, do you know that object in
our room we took to be a trolley car
fenderr'
"YeaT"
We'll, the landlord says it's mos
quito netting"
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
Where He Was Lacking.

"Brer Thomas wuE always singin'
dat song bout De Yuther Side OF Jor.
dan but you orter heerd him Wen de
doctor tor him his time had come ter
so darr'
What he say denT
Beloved lax bull, en- hollered; II
can't swim llckl l never did take no
swimmin' lessonsr Atlanta Consti.
tuition.
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
Feminine Charity

Mrs. De Playne-When l married
ny husband his eyesight was very
poor.
Mrs. Dimples-Yes, it must have
been.
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

way through the glands pores the n causing to redden
and swell and break splotehs puues and pmpes, from
which clear yellow waey matter exudes hardns and dries and
then pees off in scales fine particles like ban Eczema knde
quench and that lotions salves powders and
soap cannot smother As weather and the system
reang making efforts to throw off the accounts
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
CONSUMED FIRE THATH
WATER WILLN0T QUENCH1H|

Eczema drives lie victim almost to the verge
Of distraction by its intolerable itching, singing
and burning. II seems to set the skin on fire,
and the tormented sufferer rubs and scratches
till the flesh Is raw and the skin is torn and
bleeds. Nothing applied externally does much
good, for the disease is internal; the blood Is
= I'M AaArl al
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18

James II, Peabody. Governor OF Col
orado. has been leading the strenuous
life since last August, when the State
Condon globe. (Condon, Gilliam Co., Or.) 189?-1919, 1904-08-18
His Explanation.

Miss Matilda-Sakes alivel Thet
ought to put 1t out and cool We, too!
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1904-09-08
EVERY BODY IS EQUAL
BEFORE THE LAW

Frank H. Grote. president of the
GroteRankin company. appeared in
police court as a prisoner this after
noon. Mr. Grote was arrested by
Chief Waller on a complaint sworn to
by officer Lawson.
The charge was obstructing the
sidewalk on Sprague avenue with
mattresses and other goods taken out
of the burning building at the time
of the big fire.
The Grote-Rankin company was no.
tilted by the insurance adjusters that
the goods must not be touched until
the losses were adjusted. The police
notified the Grote-Rankin people that
the goods must be removed.
Instead of doing little political
work, all same Washington Water
Power company. the Grote- Rankin
people to help out.
This oversight Of the political fea-
lures resulted in Mr.. Grote being
taken into police court. There the
president of the furniture company
protested and declared it his belief
that the insurance agents should be
the ones held responsible by the po-
lice.
The case was set for next Satur-
day.
II Willie Cowles had obstructed the
sidewalk back of the telephone build
ing would he have been arrested?
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1904-09-08
BOY FOUND FOR FATHER

Three days absence from his boms
convinced the father and wife Of
Harry Horsman that he had come to
Spokane to be murdered. Half an
hours search by Detective Macdonald
discovered the missing Horsman In
a half dazed condition sitting in q
chair in the Office of the Norden hotel
on Riverside avenue.
Horsman's father, In fear and tre-
pidation, applied to Chief of Police
Waller this morning for help In find
ing his son. He declared the missing
man did not drink and that his fam
lily believed him murdered.
Horsman is AZ years OF age, has
been married IL years and Is car
penter living near the brickyards on
the Medical Lake road.
He came to Spokane Monday to
engage lumber for Michael Maloney
and disappeared after visiting the
Sexton Lumber company.
To Detective Macdonald he admit
ted this morning, to having started
drinking. and said he had often gone
away from home for days at time
until he could sober up. He was
turned over to his father and taken
home,
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1904-09-08

annual expenditure was about $780,
100000. For the past three years
they have been about $519,000,0
The inevitable result of such extrav-
agance was a deficit. Instead of the
surplus of $S0.O00,0OO, which the
present executive found on hand
when he assumed control, there was
now a deficit of $40,000,000." Ex-
travagance is running riot in federal,
state and munical governments in
spite of the we'll directed efforts Of
some excellent officials. Ere long
the people will demand reform in
the administration of expenses.
They would do it now If they are
made to appreciate the whole truth.
The coming election will not be de-
termined by the September vote in
hopelessly republican states where To-
cal issues were grievously handicap
ped, as was the result in Vermont
yesterday. He admonishes that har-
monious cooperation of all and the
elimination of personal factions and
unimportant differences, with no sur
render of principle, are essential to
success.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1904-09-08
(Scripps News Association }

ESOPuS. N. Y, Sept. S.--A delega-
tion of $50 democratic editors arriv-
ed on the steamer ST. John at 11:20
o'clock this morning. They took a
special train from New York and
were transferred to the boat at Hyde
park. They marched from the land
ing to the Rosemont, where they
were heartily greeted by Parker.
Editor Charles w. Knapp, the St.
Louis Republic, addressed the candi-
date on behalf of the editors. He
predicted the election of Parker. In
response Parker expressed great plea
sure in welcoming a body of repre-
sentatives of the press. zone of
the mighty forces in upbuilding and
strengthening sturdy American citi-
xenship.' He said there were ques-
tions of great import to be passed
upon by the people in November. 1t
was the duty of the press to present
them honestly and clearly so the
people could understand them. He
took up the challenge contained in
the republican platform in which it
was asserted that the republican par
ty displayed the highest capacity
for rule and government. He made
comparisons between the expenses un-
der republican administrations and
that of Cleveland. He said: During
Clevelands first term the average
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1904-09-08

all three structures by drivers going
faster than walk.
The swing of the bridges has loos-
ened all of the bolts and connections
and neeessitates the thorough over
hauling Of every connection.
For weeks past two expert bridge
men have been at work inspecting
the bridges and making repairs Each
day reports have been made by them
of damage being done through fast
driving. For this reason orders were
issued to cause the arrest of per-
sons violating the ordinances.
AS yet the board has taken no
steps to stop speeding on the Monroe
street bridge, but this. too. will come
under police supervision, as the
bridge is constantly raeked by trot-
ting horses and teams.
The first two victims Of the order
of the board were milkman and a
Chinese gardener. II. B. Hin was
the dairy driver and Gee Sing the gar
dener. Both were arrested for driv-
ing faster than walk over the How
ard street bridge by Officer Charles
Ron.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1904-09-08
CITY HALL POLITICIANS
INCREASE TAX LEVY

At the meeting Of the finance COM
mittee tonight Comptroller Daggett
will present the estimates for the
conduct Of the police and street de-
partments for the ensuing year. F.
p. Weymouth will not spring his ex-
pensive figures tomorrow night.
There will be some increase in the
street department expenses as esti-
mated, but last year was one in
which heavy expenses were incurred
through the repairing of bridges,
etc, and this will be taken into con-
sideration.
The police department will show
an increase and the water department
is expected to go way over, although
the comptroller at this time declines
to make public the estimates.
At the. meeting last night it was
shown that the tax levy would be
higher than ever before. Although
there have been reductions in the
estimates of repairs and like ex-
penses, every department shows the
imprint of the politician through the
heavier payrolls provided for
In other words, the public benefits,
such as repairs and maintenance of
public property, are to be cut down,
but jobs are to be created right and
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1904-09-08
ANDERSON WAS TO HAVE BEEN
MARRIED when ARRESTED

A. Anderson, who was yesterday
placed under bond of $500 by Judge
Stocker, is in an unenviable position
He was seen today at the Jail and
related most pitiful story. Since
his appearance in court some weeks
ago he has arrived at the conclusion
that he is disliked by everybody.
He says that he and Moser had
trouble over their live stock, but
that he has not committed any of
the crimes laid to his door. He ac-
cuses his neighbors OF spitefulness
and desire to drive him from the
neighborhood. That Moser started all
the bad talk about Anderson for
meanness and that he has succeeded
in running his reputation.
Anderson's voice shook with emo
tion when he tried to explain how two
Of the newspapers had gone in part
nership with Moser to ruin him. lie
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1904-09-08

left for the henchmen who take care
of the votes.
The fire department expenses were
considered last night, and an increase
of $15,193.90 was made in the eiti-
mate. Last year the total expenses
provided for amounted to $75.551. 10.
This year the estimate is s90,745.
The fund for general expenses and
street lights was increased from $43,-
427.57 to s45,420.
In the city treasurer's department
sS71.6O of the $1O3s increase goes for
salaries for new jobs created.
In the city clerks office the in
crease of $303.21 granted over last
years estimate is slated for sala-
ries and stationery.
In the city comptroller's office $500
of the increase asked for goes for
salaries.
In the city engineers Office the
amount allowed for salaries is $14,-
600. In the sewer department also
under the engineer, the payrolls are
increased $622.45.
Every department shows a reduc-
tion in the amounts to be expended
for the public good. Every depart
ment shows an increase in the
amounts to be expended for salaries
to politicians and their helpers.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1904-09-08
SCALpERS ORDINANCE
May BE KILLED

A. Ottinger and c. Twitchell, tick
ct brokers, of 612 Riverside avenue.
against the city of Spokane and Le-
roy Waller, chief of police, is a case
that is being argued at some length
today in Judge Kennans court. Alex
NJ. Winston, representing the plain
tins, laid great stress upon the point
of license raised in the city ordi-
nance covering the question. lie con-
tented that a private citizen was en-
titled to sell railroad tickets as were
railroad agents. They are brokers
in each sense. Winston claimed IS
license would be a fair tax and that
railroad agents should also share
therein. lie quoted at length upon
the supreme courts decision in sew
eral states as being unconstitutional
and In his opinion the ordinance could
not stand.
1t is claimed by the plaintiffs that
the scalpers ordinance was deal
put up by the railroads and that the
city council went a step further in
the latter's good graces and caused
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1904-09-08
(Scripps News Association)


SAN FRANCISCO, Cal, Sept. S.
The most important session of the
grand encampment of the knights
Templar began this morning. The
first order of business was the selec-
tion or the next conclave city, which
was given to Saratoga city the Sec
ond Wednesday In July, 1907. This
was followed by the selection of off,
GERS.
The following officers were elected:
Grand master. George Moulton of
Chicago; deputy grand master, Hen
ry Riggs of Rhode Island; grand
general, william Melish of Ohio.
Other officers elected were: grand
captain, Frank Thomas of Washing
ton, ID. c.: grand and senior warden,
Arthur Macarthur of New York; SEN
ior and junior warden. Frank Pierce
of San Francisco, treasurer. IL.
Wales Lines of Meridcn, Conn, was
reelected; grand recorder, John Ge-
row of Detroit, reelected.
Many Of the knights are already
leaving the city, some leaving to es-
cape the intense heat, others carry
ing out the schedule of tVir pro-
grams to take in the interesting
places In the state as part of their
homeward journey.