Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1904-06-24
CHIPS AND RAGS
BY LuE F. VERNO.
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"hesA SoA0i
The original Alkali Ike is dead. But
there is plenty of alkali left near Pas.
CO, for posterity.
The paper where you never see
Castoris," "Sapolio" or "Douglas
Shoe'-the Var Cry.
Why is it that the majority of girls
love the father better than the mother?
We could never understand it.
Probably nothing would please China
more than to hold the conquered ter
ritory, unless it would be the same
dimension of opium.
How Mary McLane is getting near
to her readers. She says she does not
know what she will write about in her
next book, and they do not know what
she wrote about in her last.
A lawyer in Olympia says there is
no telling where the training of dogs
may stop. For instance, he refers to
bis trip in Alaska. where dogs are
trained to draw conveyances.
While Los Angeles boasts of her
sale OF parasols. each winter, she must
not forget that Washington State
prides herself on receiving carloads of
umbrellas-parasols' brothers.
The Republicans can yell, holler
and scream the praises Of "Teddy'
but it will not accomplish one iota of
good. The bulldozing and negro-lov-
ing Roosevelt will soon pass into
oblivion.
Physicians tell us that the habit of
running up stairs rapidly produces
heart disease. We know of a young
couple who contracted bad case of
heart disease by the simple habit OF
sitting on the front-step.
The Santa Fe and Southern Pacific,
on their Southern California lines,
use oil burners on locomotives instead
of wood or coal. The greater part of
the oil used comes from Bakersfield, a
pretty town in Kern county, that
State.
But for the trespass" and "vag.
rant" laws, there are some constables,
deputy sheriffs and justices OF the
peace who would have to go back to
work and earn an honest living, or in
vent some other method OF doing their
stealing.
An Olympia gentleman asked me
the other evening, if 1 was familiar
with the works of Bobby Burns. Ger
tainly, and ! have some little knowl-
edge of those of Robbie Browning,
Billy Shakespeare and Jack Milton.
Indeed ! have.
Some misiniormed individual in
Denver yelled Hurrah for Judge
Parker" as Presidential candidate,
and was Immediately knocked down.
d" Let the punishment fit the crime" is
a declaration which exactly filled the
bill in this case.
Why should q man belonging to
a union organization vote for = man
so worthless that without the card in
his pocket he would never be heard
from? We believe in voting for a
MAN, whether he belongs, or does not
belong, to a union.
When q prominent public man dies,
the general disposition is to magnify
his good qualities and minimize his
bad ones. This was peculiarly notice.
able in the case OF Mark Hanna and it
is considerably in evidence in the case
of the late Matt Quay.
No doubt the famous Blethen man.
sion in Seattle will figure largely dur.
ing the Presidential campaign in this
State. II will be remembered that it
was at the Blethen mansion that
"Teddy" while in Seattle. stopped at,
but found the Editor.in Chief absent
at his office, grinding out brilliant"
editorial matter.
Now that train hold-ups" are in
fashion, we want to say that it does
not mean q brave man has stopped
the train in each instance. We re.
member when grass-hoppers in Kan.
sas stopped trains, and held the bust
ness men OF the cities up in that State,
as we'll as the farmers. relieving them
of money, so to speak.
The envious person is in pain upon
all occasions which ought to give him
pleasure. The relish of his life is lost,
and the objects which administer the
highest satisfaction to those who are
exempt from this passion give the
quickest pangs to persons who are SUBJ
ect to it. All the perfections OF their
fellow creatures are odious.
Palm trees are very pretty and are
nice ornamental shrubbery, but the
fir trees of Washington appear to be
the ones that remind one away from
Puget Sound OF that ballad I've a
Longing in my Heart for You, Dear
Fir Trees" You will notice we use
"Fir Trees" instead of LOUISE" it
sounds better to the absent one.