Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1904-03-17

council and in our secrets, the money
would not be in our pockets to-day"
Number Two paused for breath, and
murmur of unmistakable approval
and applause hummed through the
room.
We'll, my friends" he went on,
lubbock has devised a plan for re-
trieving the failure at Lord Gran
thorpe's and the failure at the jubilee
Here it Is.
Some years ago lubbock was chef
at the Ishmael club. Have any of you
ever been there? No? Then the Ish-
mael club, you must understand is a
coterie of travellers, actors, artists
authors, journalists, musicians and so
on, who pride themselves on being Bo-
hemians. They are popularity supposed
to be in revolt against conventionality
of every sort, and in suburban and
provincial society member of the
Ishmael club is looked upon as a dread
full upsetter of the order Of things and
as one who stands for all that is 'ad-
vanced' in thought and manners and
morals.
"As a matter of fact the members of
the Ishmael club-'Brother Ishmael-
ites,' as they call themselves-are just
as sober and solvent a set of respect
able, law-abiding, custom-following
taxpayers and citizens as you will find
outside the precincts of the clubs of
actual fogeydom. 1t is true that the
original members who founded the
Ishmael club some so years ago were
a Bohemian harum-scarum lot, but the
club as it now stands is simply living
on its past tradition and reputation.
The present members do their best to
delude themselves and the public into
the belief that they are daredevil
crew, and they take their club and
themselves SO seriously that | verify
believe most of them are persuaded
that no four walls in the world con-
tain such n gathering of sad dogs as is
to be seen in the diningroo of the
Ishmael on their house dinner night
They stick their heads, like SO many
ostriches, into the sands of the past
and refuse to see that the old order
changeth and that the members of the
Ishmael are Ishmaelites no longer All
that, however, doesn't concern us. If
they like to play at Tom and Jerry,
they are quite welcome to do it, and if
they can make believe so we'll as to
persuade themselves that they are the
original and only Toms and Jerries
why, let 'em in Heavens name, and be-
hanged to EN-. Our interest in them
doesn't hinge on that; but there is one
custom of theirs that has been handed
on from what Mr.. lubbock calls time
immoral which does concern us and
which | must describe to you.
"One OF their rules-a very excellent
one-is that of no long speeches. Ten
minutes is the maximum of time which
is allowed to any man, guest or mem
ber, prime minister or. paragrapher,
and to keep this golden rule inviolate
the original Ishmaelites initiated GUS
tom which is still religiously followed.
At every meeting of the club there is
placed on the table in front of the
chairman little metal cube about the
size of a pint-pOt. When any one
rises to speak, the chairman presses
a spring at the top of the cube which
sets an inside piece of mechanism in
motion. This piece of mechanism is
timed TO run for exactly ten minutes,
and if by that time the speaker has
not finished and the chairman has
not reversed the action, bell strikes
at the sound of which the speaker
whoever he may be, must sit down.
&c, II bat ioht u-i+I
be introduced into other institutions
To be interrupted or called to order
by a member of ones audience-even
by ones chairman-is not pleasant
But no one, no matter how touchy
can accept a pull up from an ire
sponsible piece of dead mechanism
other than good-humoredly
"But what has all this to do with
us, you say. Well, I'm coming to it,
The 18th of next month is to be a
field day with the Ishmaelites, and
they have succeeded in nobbling the
prince of Wales as their guest. And
who do you think is to be the chair
man? A gentleman who has been
honored with a considerable amount
of attention from the syndicate al
ready-1O less parsonage than our
friend Lord Cranthorpe Gentlemen,
wouldn't it be tempting Providence,
who has, so to speak, delivered these
two men into our hands, to let slip
such an opportunity of retrieving the
failure which attended our previous
attempt on the life of Lord Cranthorpe
and the royal family? The idea is not
mine, but our excellent friend Hub
books; but l am bound to confess that
if he succeeds, as he believes he can,
in effecting the assassination of the
prince and of Lord Cranthorpe at one
stroke, he will have struck blow at
the powers that be, the powers with
which we are at enmity, that would
immeasurably encourage the anarchist
spirit which it is SO much to our inter-
est to foster, and that will bring in
the subscriptions as nothing else we
have attempted lately has done"
"How is it to be managed?" l asked;
"and who's to do it?"
I.rhl IL.