The Saint Paul globe., 1904-09-06
INFORMAL TALKS
On Winding one's own Business
ANz


On Winding onefs own Business
"And you allow your daughter to do
these shings?" asked the old fashioned
woman.
y den't allow my daughter to do any
thing, replied the modern mother. She
Goes as she pleases. I don't think people
were put on this earth to be nagged.'
'But one must maintain some discipline
in Il family
# do not see the necessity" said the
modern mother. Maintaining discipline
usually means that the member of the
family hstving the strongest will-which
means in many cases merely lack of fine
feeling imposes 1t on the rest in whole
lot of absolutely unimportant things, be-
side making lot of egregious mistakes
in the things that do matter. have even
known whole family to use a par
tieIlar kind of soap because the head of
the house preferred that kind, though
they had to employ perfume afterward
to take the smell of the nasty stuff off
their hands. In our family, am happy
to say, we all try to go our respective
ways without interfering with one an
other. We don't eat bur meals when we
don't want them just because the other
raelnters of the family are eating at that
time. Neither do we feel obliged to ac-
count for the way we spend every mo-
AAiShe VI oui eiiiiC, dIlu DIS yet we nave uOl
become SO tired efaele another that we
are all praying. for deliverance. Yes, it
does make a little nreg gularity and trou-
Bile; but don't think the object of fam
lily life is to see how much like an in
sti.dtion home can BE made. And, be-
sides, it is good thing to acquire the
life. fssssss ss-5 s-5s
Il CART imagine where we all got the
1Ic,~.
1 am not entirely destitute of it myself.
bus 1t strikes me as being about as IRA
tlonal a desire as one could entertain In
tie first place, the things in which we
feel an inclination to interfere are often
entirely immaterial, OF of very small
moment; and in the next place, when it
conles to serious matters, how can we
KNOW ercugh about another person to ar
rarGe his or her life? If / can never be
very sure in my own case what is the
pest course of action TO pursue how can
be competent to judge for another? One
mlTht as well try to NEEDLE with the
stars. as think somebody has said, for
one really knows as much about the in
dlViduality of Others even Of those one
Knows most intimately, as one does about
the celestial spheres. An individuality
mus develop itself according to it's own
inner necessities il it is ever to have any
value, and no one but the individuality
ca'1 feel or understand those necessities,
II you begin soon enough you can, it is
tr'.e. by>constant naggings and interfer-
ence. destroy the individuality, but you
can never put anything in its place. You
VIII only get a nonenity where you might
nave had an entity. My individuality
may@not amount to much, but It is ali
nave or ever can have.g Take it from
me and I am nothing.
Ihere are times. or course, when it is
perfectly proper to give other people the
!! peneht of whatever wisdom you possess.
bi't II is very good and safe rule never
TO volunteer advice, even to your daughter
-pcrhaps less to her tnan to anyone else.
Wa1t tilfT1t Is asked for, or, better still,
ist " De dragged from you reluctantly
II your counsel is found to be valuable
she chances are that it will be asked for
frequently, sl and even dragged from you,
ard arc: If events prove it to be worthless, as
IS quite probable, you can console your
self Will the thought that YOU gave II
unwlliingly-New York Times.