The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1904-07-09
WNNNeNNNNAa

i - !
Emeline-Sara and l can hardly nm,
oerstand each other over the telephone.
hdgar-"-Well, talk one at time.
Know him2 / should say sol We
are huHbands-in-law." "EhF" "Our
wives were divorced from the same
man."-Ex. as-0~-
She told me that I might hope"
Better look out! I've known girls to
say that when they intended to accent
chap."-Puck.
smith has lost his job, and I'm
hustling to get him another" "You
are' Eyes. / owe him ten dOllarR
and I'm afraid he'll be needing IT,
Puck.
stranger-seems to me this crowd,
ca street Is a queer place for a hospi-
tai. Nat1ve-Well, don't know. Two
trolley lines meet here.-New York
Weekly.
How did you get your black eye,
sambo" "Well, boss, yer see was
out a-lookin' fer trouble, and dis ERE
eye was de fust to find it."-Yonkers
Statesman.
Philanthropist-Why did you change
the title Of 1.-THE Ladies' Home" to
"Old Ladies' Homer Mrs. Du Goods
1t was becoming too crowded.-New
York Weekly.
Parker-We've moved again. Barker
You have? Parker-Yes; the chill
dren were 80 noisy that we couldn't
stand what the neighbors said about
them.-Detrolt Free Press.
Young LADY, can always tell your
work the instant see it. Magazine
artist (delighted)-Can you, really1
Young lady-Easily. The women all
look alike.-New York Weekly.
woman 10 naturally of a cllnging
nature" observed he. "Yes," rejoined
his wife, 'but she isn't to be compar-
ed with a man when 1t comes to hold
ing on to ass bill."-New Yorker.
Sam Shinbone-Tse thinkin' OBJ
marrying dat youngest Jackson gal.
Nose Johnson-Don't do 1t, niger
don't do it. Why, dat gal never KEEP
a job for over two weeks In her life
Ex.
Bring me some Coffee" said Mr..
Nurox, as he finished his dessert.
"Demi-tasse" inquired the waiter.
'sure, If that's the best you got, and
say, bring one O. them little pots full
Of ii. "-Philadelphia Press.
"You are always more or less skep-
teal about what you see in print"
YES" answered the man who has his
own ideas about things. Truth may
be at the bottom Of well, but it isn't
an ink well."-Washington Star.
Husband (of popular author)-DO
you mean to tell me, doctor, that my
wife is insane7 Doctor-No, not so
bad as that, but she is hopelessIy fool.
ish. Husband--Well, that's a relief.
was afraid her usefulness as a writer
was impaired-Life.
A prison visitor recently asked one
of the prisoners how he came to be
there. Want" was the answer.
"How was that, pray2" "Well, want
ed another mans watch. He wasn't
willing I should have it, and the judge
wants me to stay here Ave years.
Tit Bits.
Footinitt theoretically helping at
bazaar)-Won't you put in for a raf1e
for this cushion2 Visitor-Oh, no,
thanks! Footinitt-Of course, It's
rather useless and gaudy, and so forth
and personally think the designs
rotten. But do put in for 1t! Visitor
No, thanksy I made it!-Punch.
Little Willie, who is Philadelphia
boy, had been watching a dog chasing
his tail for three minutes. Papa" he
asked, what kind Of a dog is that2'
THAT" said the father, ''is a watch
dog.". Willie was silent a moment.
WELL" he finally said, from the time
he takes to wind himself up 1 guess
he must be a Waterbury watch dog
Philadelphia Ledger.
When the rreckied girl took a sea,
directly across the car from the bright
child the others were oppressed with
forebodings. But they had not long
to remain in suspense. There's 6
complexion with a pattern in it" ex
claimed the bright child, almost al
once. Hereupon the others breathed
more freely, for 1t was likely that the
worst was over.-Detroit Journal.
Mrs. Househunter-This house does
not seem to be very substantially built
Even the floor shakes when we walk
on 1t. Agent-But madam, this dool
ts-er-the very latest thing in spring
dancing floors. All the newest houses
have them. Mrs. Househunter-And
the stairs creak terribly. Agent-Oh
we don't make any extra charge fol
those patent burglar-alarm stairs
madam.-Chicago News.
Dick-Say-seen a letter Of mine
living around, gray envelope2 Sweer
(stops making the bed)-Do you meal
a letter starting of, Dearest Dickie,
and asking you to come down ant
spend Sunday, and telling you how
lonely she has been all the week, and
|