davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
THE Willy RED MAN.
some Instances Of the Indians
Quickness OF Wit.

Qutckneks OF Wit.
Numerous instances of the red mans
quickness OF wit are related by those
who have had dealings with him. A
Canadian chief was looking Idly on
while some Englishmen were hard at
work improving property newly acqulr-
ed from the dusky tribe.
why don't you work." asked the su.
peryisor Of the chief.
why you no work yourselfg' was
the rejoinder.
Il work headwork." replied the white
man, touching his forehead. but come
here and kill this calf for me. and III
give you quarter"
The Indian stood still for a moIient
apparently deep In thought. all then
he Went of to kill the calf.
why don't you finish your joDY
presently asked the supervisor. seeing
the man stand with folded arms over
the unskinned, undressed carcass.
"You say you give me quarter to
kill calf" was the reply. Calf dead.
Me want quarter"
The white man smiled and handed
the Indian an extra coin to go on with
the work.
How is it" asked the Engllshman
one day after series of such one sided
dealings, that you so often get the
better Of meY'
Il work headworh." solemnly replied
the man OF the woods.
A white trader once succeeded In
selling large quantity of gunpowder
to one of this tribe on the assurance
that 1t was a new kind that the white
man used for seed and If sown in es-
pecially prepared loan would yield an
amazing crop. Away went the Indian
to sow his powder and in his hope of
making money from his fellows was
careful not TO mention his enterprise.
When at last. however, he realized how
he had been duped he held his tongue
for year or more until the tricister
had completely forgotten the occur
renee. Then he went TO his hoaxer's
store and bought goods on credit
amounting 10 little more than the
price of the planted gunpowder he
had the reputation of good payer. and
his scheme worked easily. When set,
ting day came, the creditor called
promptly.
Right" said the Indian slowly =
fright, but my powder not yet sprout-
ed. Me pay you when me reap him."
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
Group.

The peculiar cough which indicates
Group is usually well known to the moth.
ers of croupy children. No time should
be lost in the treatment of it, and fo1
this purpose no medicine has received
more anniversary approval than Chamber.
lain's Cough Remedy. Do not waste val,
liable time in experimenting with untried
remedies, no matter how highly they may
be recommended, but give this medicine
as directed and all symptoms of Group
will quickly disappear. For sale by
Stone 4 Mercer, druggists.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
Country For chIIdren.

There should be some sort OF law
framed whereby each boy. just as in
France and Germany each ablebodied
man performs his term OF military
duty, must spend at least three win
tiers of his boy time in the country.
writes Emery Potter in Outing. And
when ! say country / do not mean that
pert refinement OF the genteel pastoral,
the suburb. believe 1t would act as
tonic to the race. There would be
wider outlooks, freer. less cramped
brains and harder souls.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
Mark Twain Missed the pont.

The success achieved by Mark Twain
during his boating days on the Missis-
sippi river was due not only TO the fact
that he was skillful pilot, but that he
was an earnest one as well. A man
who knew Mr.. Clemens in those days
told how the genial humorist once
missed his boat. Instead of inventing
an excuse, as many of his companions
did, he reported TO his superior officer
as follows:
MY boat left at 6:10 l arrived at
the landing at 6:20 and could not catch
it"
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
THRAsHING SERVANTS.
Domestic Life In England In Il,
Time of Henry VIII.

Domestic Life In England In the
Time of Henry VIII.
In that remarkably minute chronicle
Of domestic life in England in the time
Of Henry WILL, Tusser's Five Hum
dred Points of Good Husbandry.y the
learned and pious author seems to take
it for granted that the only way of
dealing with maidservants is to thrash
them numerically. He tells us in his
inimitable doggerel that "a maid must
be forced TO be Clearly" or she is to be
made TO cry creak." Mattresses are
advised ito so about with holly
wand in their hand. although they may
not always have occasion TO use IL. and
TO pay home when they fight''-that is
TO say, thrash-"but not TO be always
Gliding" AS regards the laundry, the
domestic sorfs are warned 10 take
heed when they wash or run in the lash
and 10 wash well, wiring well and beat
well, so that II any lack beating IL viii
be themselves"
As for the unhappy Cicely, the dairy
maid, she is TO cry "creak'-that is TO
say, to be thrashed-if he- cheese is
"hoven" or pulled up. and if the cheese
be tough Cicely is to have "a crash"
If the cheese be spotted Cicely is to be
amended by the bayes, and II II be too
full of whey the wretched dairymaid
is 10 have "a dressing Finally, If
any maggOts nre found IN tha cbaesa
mistress is to be at Cicely by and by
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14

Benevolent Old Gentleman Don't
you think fishing cruel sport?
Flsherman-I should just think it
was. I've been sitting here for five
hours and never had single bite. and
I've got three wasp stings and haen
eaten up with flies. and the suns taken
ali the skin of the back of my neckl-
Pick-Me-Up.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
Sure Cure For Piles.

Itching piles produce moisture and
cause itching, this form, as well as blind
bleding or prctruding piles, are cured
by DR.. Bo-sanko's Pile Remedy. Stops
itching and bleeding. Absorbs tumors.
soc jar, at druggists, or sent by mail.
Treatise free. Write me about your
case. DR.. Bosanlso, Philo., Pa. For sale
by Stone & Mercer, druggists.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
Wonderful Nerve

Is displayed by many man enduring
pains of accidental cuts, wounds, bruises,
burns, scalds, sore feet or stiff joints.
But there no need for it. Buclslen' Ar
Mica Salve will kill the pain anil cure the
trouble. It's the best salve on earth for
piles, too. 25c at Frank G. BANDS drug
store.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
Saved from Terrible Death

The family of Mrs. NJ. L. Bobbitt, Of
Bargerton, Tenn, saw her dying anc
were powerless to save her. The most
skilled physicians and every remedy
used, failed, while consumption wa.
slowly but surely taking her life. In
this terrible hour D. Kings New Dis.
covey for Consumption tuned despair
into joy. The Gsrt bottle borught i'm.
mediate elief and it's continued use com.
pletely cured her. It's the most certain
cure in the world for all throat and hung
troubles. Guaranteed bottles soc and
sl.oO. Trial bottles free Mt Frank G.
BANDS drug store.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
Canals In England.

Canals in England date back to an
early period. for the Romans built two
in Lincolnshire-the Foss dixie. forty
miles long and still navigable, and the
Caer dixie. The first British made ca
nal was constructed in 1874 by Henry
l. and Joined the Trent to the Witham.
1t was toward the end of the eight
eenth century that the greatest amount
of energy was expended in the building
of canals, mainly due to the Duke of
Bridgewater and the skill of his en-
gineer. James Brindley. In the last
decade of that century canal mania
ragged.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
Rebuking nm Emperor.

Once, so the story goes. Emperor
Nicholas of Russia asked List to play
in his presence. The musician COM
piled. but during the performance the
car started conversation with an
aid-de-camp. List stopped playing at
once. The car asked what was the
matter. when the emperor speaks"
said List. every one must be SILENT
The car smilingly took the hint, and
the playing proceeded.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
A Vest POCKET Doctor.

Never in the way, no trouble to carry,
easy to take, pleasant and never failing
in results are DeWitt's Little Early Ris-
ers. A vial of these little pills in the
vest pocket is a certain guarantee
against headache, biliousness, torpid liy-
er and all of the ills resulting from con
stipation. They tonic and strengthen the
liver. Sold by Wells & Haymaker.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
IA Generonr snirIt.

"Henry. ! want 81 this morning"
"What for?'
Must account to you for every
penny spend?'
u don't insist upon knowing about
every penny, When it's less than n
nickel you can bunch it"-Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
Ten Years in Bed.

R. a. Gray, ]. p, oakville, Ind,
writes: For ten years l was confined to
my bed with disease OF my kidneys. It
was 50 severe that could not move part
of the time. ] consulted the very best
medical skin available, but could get no
relief until FOley's Kidney Cure was
recommended to me. 1t has been a Cod
scented to me-" For sale by Stone & AIer-
Ger, c. D. Sturm & Co., and R. ]. Criss.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
What's In a Name7

Everything is in the name when it
comes to Witch Hazel salve. E. c. De-
Witt & Co, OF Chicago discovered some
years ago how to make salve from
Witch Hazel that is a specific for piles
For blind. bleeding, itching and protrud-
ing piles, eczema, cuts, burns, bruises and
all skin diseases Dewitt's SAWS has nc
equal This has given rise to numerous
worthless counterfeits. Ask for De.
wftt's-the genuine. Sold by Wells 4
Haymaker.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
NOTICE.

Home, right in center OF Clarksburg;
modern in every particular; good well
and garden. VIII sell for s4,e5O. This
property is cheap at 5000. Don't con
tradict this statement until you have
investigated. Enquire of w. G. Repass.
No. SIG Preston street, Clarksburg,
w. Va. janetf
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14

Domestic Troubles.

1t is exceptional TO find a family where
there are no domestic ruptures occa-
sionally, but these can be lessened by
having DR.. Kings New Life Pills around.
Much trouble they save by their great
work in stomach and liver troubles. They
not only relieve you, but cue. 25c at
FrnrrlS G. BANDS drug store.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14

"Are you sure" asked the captain of
industry, that you love my daughterg'
Come, I say" replied the duke,
you're not going to be sentimental at
your time OF life, are youy'-Chicago
Record Herald.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
Sweet Melody Flour

Dancing every Friday and Tuesday
evening from to u at the Elk Bridge
hall. Come and enjoy the new music
just received, since the last dance. Most
pleasant dance hall in town. Floor I'M
excelled. Violin and electric player mu-
sic. jan7tf
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
nidn.t Sc. IT,.

How did your nephew's wedding
pass off?"
'Just splendid"
Were there any contretempsyr
4 don't think so. l didn't see any.
You see. we had the church Thoroughly
cleaned up before the wedding took
place. cleveland Plain Dealer.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
As IL Is said.

Hoax-Do you know that thin fellow
over there?
Joax-oh, yes: we are very thick.
Hoax-And do you know the big FAT
one?
Joax- Slightly Philadelphia Record
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
Not untiI Then.

when may woman be said to be
happily marrled?'
"Not until she has had the pleasure
of refusing several men."-Detroit Free
Press.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
Sweet Melody Flour,
WATER CONSUMERS.

Water rents for quarter ending De-
cember 81, 1908, are now due and paya-
BILE at the Office of the city clerk. 300
Court street.
HUGH cALLAGHAN,
dec2s dim w. w. Com.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
Sweet Melody Flour.

IN eyery nome where there il . piano
taere should be piano player There
is none better than the Harmonist Sold
bv the Thomson Music Company Elk
Bridge building. feb la-tf
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14

Clara-oh. hum! wish the Lord
had made me mani
Mother-Perhaps he has. dear; only
you haven't found him yet.-New York
Times
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14

''TheIr marriage was hasty alfalF.~,
| understand"
''Yes. indeed. They told the minister
10 hurry, as they had engaged cab
nan by the hourr-ludge.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
Just One Minute.

One Minute Cough Cure gives relief
in one minute, because it kills the mi
,crobe which tickles the mucous mem
brane, causing the cough, and at the
same time clears the phlegm, draws out
the inflammation and heals and soothes
the affected parts. One Minute Cough
Cure strengthens the lungs, wards of
pneumonia and is harmless and never
failing cure in all cunble cases OF
coughs, colds and Group. One Minute
Cough Cure Is pleasant to take, harmless
and good alike for young and old. For
sale by Wells & Haymaker.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
Sweet Melody Flour

In buying Lyons candies you got the
best candies at reasonable prices. G. D.
sturm & Co. jan5-dtf
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14

Custom may lead man into many
Erors. but it justifies none. Fielding.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14

Since the Introduction of printing the
subject matter of the aggregate of
books shows Approximately the follow
ing averages: Law and sociology. one
quarter of all; literature, one-fifth; APP
piled science, one-eighth; history and
geography, one-tenth; theology. reli-
gion and speculation. one-tenth; miscei-
laneous and photography, one-tenth;
philology and languages, one-twen-
tieth; natural sciences, art and phlloso.
ply shading Off into small fractions
and poetry not appearing in the classlti-
cation.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
THE ANCESTRAL TREE.


-tA-1t 1AaEt americans.
Speaking of heterogeneities and the
homogeneousness OF the same. II one
may say 1t. the American. saw 500
years from now, may have some trou-
BILE in tracing the lines OF his family
tree" said n thoughtful man. ..At any
rate, judging from the progress the
United States is making. there Is a
chance for few difficulties along THU;
line. In the erstwhlle, and even now.
the job was comparatively simple. II
was and is simply a question OF going
back TO the days OF the Revolution.
colonial days, the days OF the white
haired grand danes. But the American
OF the future viii have no such simple
task. Ones family tree must branch
out and expand with the country. For
instance, the men and women OF the
future will have TO trace their lines
through an ancestry thus geographical
" given: Indian, Mexican. American.
Hawaiian, Porto Rican, Cuban. philip.
pinian, Panamaian and Alaskan. And
yet these are only few OF the pos
siDiiities which might lie mentioned in
the same connection and for the same
reason. Uncle Sam is an expansive
sort of fellow, and just where he win
quit one may not guess even in the
Wild reeklessness of ones fancy. The
American OF the future may be put to
the dire extremity of showing some
sort of remote ancestry association
with even the lynx eyed far eastern
ers.'-.New Orleans Times Democrat
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
WHY Kitty is apnss.,

A great many years ago the people OF
Egypt, who had many idols. worshiped
the cat among others. They thought
she was like the moon, because she was
more active at night and because her
eyes changed like the moon. So they
made an idol with cats head and
named 1t Pasht. The same name they
gave to the moon, for the word means
"the face of the NOON" The word has
been changed to Pas" and "Pus" and
has come at last to be "Puss," the name
the most of us give to the cat.-Boston
Transcript.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14

II. D. Stuart is buying and sell \
horses at his large barns on Traders a.
ley in the rear Of the Central Presby-
terrain church, where the clarksburg
Transfer was formerly located. He alma
to have some horses on hand all the time.
ae win take few boarders at the barn.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
A Night Alarm.

Worse than an alarm of fire at night
is the brassy cought of Group, which
sounds like the children's death knen,
and ii means death unless something is
done quickly. Foleyis Honey and Tar
never fails, to give instant relief and
quickly cures the wost forms of Group.
Mrs. P. L. cordier, OF Warrington, KY,
writes: 'My three-year-old girl had a
severe case OF Group; the doctor said she
could not live. got bottle of Foley's
Honey and Tar. The first dose gave
quick relief, and ii saved her life" For
sale by Stone & Mercer, c. D. iSturm &
Co. and R. ]. Criss.
The LoaRns Business.
Ny son. follow now In the footsteps
of the loafer and make no example OF
him who is born tired. for verify say
unto you his business is overstocked.
the seats on the corner are all taken.
and the whiting places are all occu-
pied. II is better to saw wood at two
bits a cord than white Mt whiting
match and abuse the government. Ny
ton. whilst thou hast in thy skull the
sense of n jaybird break away from
the cigarette habit. for. 10, thy mind is
less intelligent than store dummy.
Yes: thou art a cipher with the rim
Knocked or Roller Monthly.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
Swe ct Melody Flour

Public dancing at the EIkbridge dance
nall every Tuesday and Friday nights
admission to gentlemen so cents, and to
ladies 25 cents. Music by the Peerless
piano player. octl6tf
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
...-..,.ss ..ss*.ss,s

For something you can eat go TO the
Coffee and Chop House, Pike street,
opposite Waldo. IL.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
For Gentlemen and Ladies'.

TOT uehtIemeh and Ladies.
AIaniciring, Shampooing, Facial Mus
sage and Scalp Treatment. Miss 2. d.
showalter, room Of, End floor, Jacobs
building. jan s-tf.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1904-01-14
Sweet Melody Flour.

All persons having any Of our ice
cream freezers, please notify us at the
store or by mail. We win call and get
them. Respectfully, ]. I. Swager.
sspstf
The Kendrick gazette. [volume] (Kendrick, Idaho) 1892-1968, 1904-02-05
Sixteen Bodies Remain.

Cheswick, Pa, Feb. 8. - Sixteen
bodies are still in the mines awaiting
removal.
Slowly they are coming out Of their
trance, up at the Harwick mine, where
900 lives were blotted out and an en-
tire town plunged into mourning by
one of the most horrible disasters in
the HISTORY of Pennsylvania mining.
For day or two after the catastro-
phe everybody was stunned. To begin
with nearly the entire male population
of the village was destroyed. Only
helpless women and tiny children were
left. For in Pennsylvania the boys are
sent to work as soon as they are able to
lie about their ages without detection.
The Kendrick gazette. [volume] (Kendrick, Idaho) 1892-1968, 1904-02-05
FARCE IN MARYLAND SENATE.
Only One Member Present When the
Roll Is Called.

Roll Is Called.
nnapolis.-Saturday's session of
the Maryland senate was probably the
most unique in its history. The bedy
was called to order in the regular
manner by President Jones when the
hour for meeting arrived, he being the
only senator present. The chaplain
was present and was made secretary.
After the roll had been called and the
announcement Of a lack Of quorum
was made, he was constituted a ser
geant at arms and sent for the absent
senators. His report was that none
could be found. No business was
therefore attempted. About noon Del.
egates Collins and Williams arrived
and escorted the senate, in the person
Of President Jones, to the house OF
delegates chamber, there to ballot as
required by the statutes of the United
States for a United States senator
The roll call thereupon developing the
fact that only six delegates were pres
ent, the speaker announced that, ow.
ing to the lack Of quorum, there
would be ne ballot for the election OF
a senator.
The Kendrick gazette. [volume] (Kendrick, Idaho) 1892-1968, 1904-02-05
fifth ami adversary of the battle Of San.

fifth anniversary of the battle of San
ia Ana. 81
The G. A. r. Of Spokane is continu-
ing it's active campaign to have Fort
Sherman at Occur dAlene, Idaho, con-
verified into a national old soldiers
home. n. B. Scott of Spokane, who
was appointed a national committee
man at the Saith annual encampment
Of the G.. A. R., has been securing sig
natures to petition to the Idaho and
Washington congressional delegations
and has another lot ready to forward.
Four men were caught in the at
tempt to open the safe of real estate
agent at Seattle at o'clock in the
morning. Reginald Clay. one of them,
is clerk in the Office. He was in
toxicated and it is supposed was en-
ticed to the office by the others for
the purpose OF opening the safe. The
names of the others are given as Ben
West, Thomas Lee and Ed Hudson.
The Kendrick gazette. [volume] (Kendrick, Idaho) 1892-1968, 1904-02-05
German Missions Beseiged.

Berlin, Feb. Ia dispatch received
here from Swakopmund, German
Southwest Africa, says that since JAN
uary 81 three men have been killed in
sorties from Okahandja against the be-
sieging rebel natives. The garrison at
Omarurr reports a severe attack on
January ~, and it it is assumed that
Otimbingwe is also besieged. Repairs
to- the railroad beyond Karibib have
been. commenced.
Okahandja is mission station 80
miles from Walfisch bay. 1t was re-
ported recently that the Kafiffrs had
effected a junction with tae Hreeros,
who were beiseging that place, which
was being defended by Lieutenant Seu-
low with 200 men.
The Kendrick gazette. [volume] (Kendrick, Idaho) 1892-1968, 1904-02-05
Evans 10 for the canteen.

Washington.-Rear Admiral r. d.
Evans, commander in chief of the Ash
attic squadron, writes to the navy de-
partment that. assertions in his COM
mand have been reduced to q mimi
mum. He says the worst drawback
to discipline has been the excessive
use of alcoholic drinks. Admiral Ev-
ans recommends the establishment Of
canteens in the navy where beer and
light wines may be sold to the men,
to be taken with their meals or when
coaling ship.