The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1904-03-02
WHOLE NO. 1855.
INTERESTING THINGS.

The feet ofthe semuambulist should
never sleep.
The mule doesn't admire the short
ears of the horse.
The real circus never fits like the
paper ON the wall,
, Weather strips will soon be classed
as long felt wants.
Popular faltacies are more plentiful
than popular facts.
+ The more bread the baker makes
the more he kneads
Eating horse flesh is poor way to
acquire horse sense.
Promises make debts and debts
+ make more promises
Men who court trouble soon find
/ themselves welded TO il.
Better kiss the girl before Won pro
j pose she may refuse Won.
The nun who says all men are
thieves will bear Watching.
+ Some people spend the most of their
time in nursing animositv.
II You would keep yonr feet when
/ on the Ice, keep Your bend.
You can't distinguish saints from
sinners by their shiny hats.
Men glance nj the past she who
passed is young and pretty.
Conflicting testimony is but another
name for the expert article.
There IL no ailment more difficult to
cure than willful ignorance.
The man who poses as n lion in 80
elety Is usually bear Mt home.
Some men stop travelling afoot M
soon ms they begin 10 get ahead.
lt's always hard to please II man
who doesn't know what he wants.
The reading that malSeth man full
is probably the wine when it is red.
Say something and snw no wood. .
seems to be the tramps version Of it.
Lots OF people nre too selfish to as-
slst others IN having n good time.
Good fortune comes to men oftener
ON foot than IN n stylish carriage.
Tho stars on nm officers coat often
causes girl TO become star-gazer
The early milkman catches n
glimpse of a woman true complexion.
No man who ignores small things
ever accompanies any very great ones.
You cannot always tell how far n
man can jump by letting him tell it.
More men have been ruined by
schemes than by bad companionship.
\ glrla conversation in naturally
flowery when she talks through her
hat.
Baseball is the one business III
which mn occasional strike il neces-
sary.
Ignorance may be bliss, but love
speaks the mother tongue of every
body.
Thrust be hard on the fingers of the
jolly mute who is always cracking
jokes.
Ignorance is bliss in the case of u
man who does not know that he has
liver
A baggage master checks your
trunk and II physician checks your
grippe.
Silver must be the kind of money
that talks, ms silence IL said to be
golden.
or course IT was woman who said
An honest man is the lonlest work
of God.
Keep your seats until the train is at
full atop. or You cannot recover DANA
ges il hurt
Tho respect due to old age is always
dealt out with Indie to the wealthy
grandfather.
The right man in the right place
often adds to the number of the sher-
iif's boarders.
Experience is such costly teacher
that it keeps nan hnstlng To pay
the tntion fees.
The osslicd man in the museum
leads hard life, but the fat lady
makes the most of it.
A walking Delegate is mnn who
give uthera employment.
The hardness Of his way is never
realized by the transgressor until he
gets d real hard fall on IT.
A thing that is sown IN corruption
runs the risk of being cut down by an
investigating committee.
II is said that an Mp to date west
side maid who formerly walked in her
sleep now rides n chainless wheel.
When typesetting machine breaks
down md the printer goes back to the
old way, it might be called reverting to
tyne
The individual who sets next to
fnt mnn in a crowded car knows what
it ls TO have greatness thrust npon
them.
The German reichstag is said to be
the cheapest Of all parliaments of