The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1904-08-04

last reached the village AS passed
Prof. Humbug's house that gentleman
opened the door and picked up the
morning paper from the doorstep. He
heard my sobs and imprecations, and
called me back. l don't know why I
obeyed him: perhaps l hungered for
word of sympathy; at any rate, I went
back and asked what was wanted.
81 called to you to find out what has
ruffled your spirit on this glorious
spring morning. Don't you know that
your tears and your woebegone appear
ance are utterly at variance with the
peacefulness, the harmony, in which
Nature has wrapped herself on this al
most perfect morning? Come inside,
and tell me your troubles"
Thus admonished, followed the
professor into the house. He led the
way to the sitting room, and while he
stood wiping his glasses, preparatory
to the perusal of the newspaper, 1
stood wiping my eyes, feeling little
ashamed that the calm and dignified
professor had caught me in the act OF
crying. 1t seemed that his glasses
must have been very misty, for he kept
on wiping Their. while he interrogated
and lectured me.
"Now, then," he began, "tell me your
| troubles"
'Father gave me an awful whipping
this morning because l spilled some
milk" said in weepy tone of voice.
"What silly boy you are" sneered
the professor. "Don't you know he
continued, "if ever you want to be-
come great man like-h'm-well, let
us say like myself, or Julius Caesar, or
Captain Kidd, you must first of all ac-
quire fortltude? Have you never read
of the Spartan boy who let the stolen
fox eat out his liver and never said so
much as boo about it? Can't you
take these unpleasant incidents and
accidents of your boyhood days in a
philosophical manner and spirit? Look
at mel My name is in the mouths of
all the learned men of the world; am
perpetual chairman of the Central
New Y ork Association for the Propaga-
tion of Rationalism; my name puts to
flight the horde of mystic sentimental
lists; am tower of strength in the
councils of practical men in this prac-
tical age. Do you suppose would or
could, have achieved the very pinnacle
of fame, and usefulness to my more or
less benighted fellow men, if l had
been given to crying and sulking when
was boy of your age, merely be-
cause my father happened to tan my
hide? 1 thank my stars l am made of
sttrner stuff. Nothing ever ruffles my
spirit, unless it be boy crying when he
ought to be glad that wise father
chastises him occasionally to inculcate Q
in him the spirit of endurance, to de-
velop in him the germs of fortitude.
) Go home and repent-not in tears, but
in the determination to overcome your
weakness"
The professor seemed to consider the
interview as closed, but l didn't. l
was even in my young days somewhat
I of an investigator, and always liked to
+ put people to the test when they made
!, sweeping declarations, or professions
, or protestations. That you may under.
s stand what follows, will try to make
!. plain to you the situation as we'll as
can remember it at this distant date.
9 The professor moved chair with q
D leather-cover cushion in it to the bay
n window at the east side of the room
i He placed the chair so that when sitting
q down his back would be towards the
r window. On his right would be ta
: Bile, covered with books, papers, etc
t The only other living creature in the
u room, beside the professor and myself
4 that was aware of, was large cat, Of
d the Thomas persuasion, who rubbed
q his fur against my bare legs, and who's,
T purring sounded far more muslca
"a than the professors strident voice.
d lack ability to describe graphically ant
a succintly what happened; I can onl!
II do my best, and must leave the rest t.
q your imagination.
n When the professor had brought hi
l. lecture to q conclusion thrust m,
y hands into my trousers pockets, as boy
20 will do. I had the day before pickle,