The sun., 1904-11-06
Absolutely don't know the difference be-
tween a stew and Hungarian goulash.'

The English Candida found her poet
wandering on the Thames Embankment.
The American found hers in the subway.
He was long haired, anRrnic and held a
bunch OF manuscript In his hand, which
he explained was the libretto Of an opers.
He had spent his last five cents for ride
in the subway, thinking that the new thrill
might give him an inspiration He had
preempted the title Of subway poet, and
while she fed him and admired his oval
face, his dark. lustrous eyes and his gen
eral air OF withdrawal from a strenuous
life, he outlined the thoughts that would
naturally come to a poet in his first under
ground voyage.
He .is thinking Of calling the book 'Pale
Pillars He asks II she can think OF
better title than that She can't.
Husband comes in just at that moment.
He's never been quite able to make out
how wife spends her day. Wife has to
take him into the kitchenette while she az
plains what the artistic temperament really
is. Husband has never quite understood
that either, beiEg just plain, ordinary
variety Of business man. He peers through
the slide which leads from the htohenette
!" tuc ToOul dbu thCA oo1&Auo W
the door and sends the boy out for more
food Of the nourishing variety. instead
OF the grape fruit salad covered with violets
the poet is toying with at that moment
Husband never passes a beggar on the
street without giving him something. II
it is no more than little advice. Hehnches
amcably with wife and poet and oon-
gratulates himself on his way back DOWN
town that 1T isn't any worse than that
1t is a poor rule that doesn't work both
ways 1t is owing to this new method Of
transit that N man who has always lived
in Harlem, was born, schooled, married
there, asserts that he first learned how
wicked and deceitfui the world really 10.
Until the completion OF tho subway his
environment prevented this information
from reaching him. As he tells the story,
his sister comes IN from Long Island to take
her first ride in the subway and naturally
appears at his office at luncheon tn,e--in
the way sisters from time irnmemorial
have had. Heusually has taken his luncheon
where be has been waited on by q perfectly
respectable middle aged woman, to whom
he gives 10 cents a week In tips. He de-
cides that he will take his sister to something
better than his daily resort. for aho has
married wen and he doesn't care for sym-
pathy.
They eat a good sized luncheon andhe tips
the waiter generously and sees his siste
to the subway station. When he gets
back to the office he finds his wife awaiting
him. She has decided to take her first
ride downtown and to celebrate by having
luncheon with him.
Let's 60 to a nice place to-day, she says,
and he steers her to the same restaurant to I
which he has just taken his sister.
When they get inside the same waiter
spies them and leads them to his table,
mindful OF the recent tip. In his whole
face and manner one reads that he under
stands the situation. The diner-out has
simply been unluoky that day In having
two Of bis sweethearts demand bis time
and money, but IL ia not his place to show
that he knows or to betrsy his PATRON
you've not been In here for long time,
he says. genially.
Then he supplants this by urging him to
eat little something, giving him wink.
to show that he thinks his refusal to take
food is apt to arouse suspicion. Husband
explains the situation to wife. when the
waiter finally departs to fill her order. and
wife falls into the scheme by sdding her
entire aties TO the walters. She says that IL
is q bad habit to 60 without luncheons and
that he will be III If he does not take better
care Of himself.
When they finally rise to 20 out the