The Kootenai herald. [volume] (Kootenai, Idaho) 1891-1904, 1904-05-20
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Bobbles-What does this author
mean by saying that the hero had
"well-carved" features? Dobbles-
Perhaps he shaved himself.
Il wonder what makes my eyes so
weak" said an ultra-Radical once to
Mr.. DisraeH. "Why, they are in a
weak place." said the latter.
Little Willie-Say. pa, how does an
army scour the country? Pa-With
brushes, my son. Little Willie-With
brushes? Pa-Yes, brushes with the
enemy.
May-Did Clara's husband leave
her much when he died? Belle He
left enough to make her comfortable,
but not enough to get her a second
husband.-Life.
Waiter-Will you try a course din
ner? Country Groom-No, sir; no
coarse dinner for us. Bring us in the
finest one you've got. We don't come
down to the city every day; do we,
Matilda?
He-Do you know, dear, l was just
upstairs looking at baby and l be-
lieve she has got your hair. She
(springing up)-Good gracious! l
thought l had put that switch out of
the child's reachl
did you ever see the Dardaneles
while you were in Europe?" NO"
answered Mr.. Cumrox You see, we
were so busy sightseeing that we
didn't have time to call on any OF our
friends. Washington Star
First Boy-And because you couldn't
find a penny to pay the fare. did the
conductor make you get off the omni-
bus and walk? Second Boy-No, he
only made me get off l could have
sat in the road if l wanted to--rit.
Bits.
"a tall bride is the best-looking
don't you thinkT' "Wer' replied the
titled Englishman who had caught on
to a little American slang, 80 far as
am personally concerned. l certainly
am not looking for one who is short"
Chicago Evening Post.
The army officer looked with dis.
pleasure at the soiled sheet of paper
that had been handed him. That's a
measly looking document" he eX
claimed. Eyes, sir" said the subor
dinate, touching his hat IT'S the
sick list. "-Chicago Tribune.
Edyth-Yes, you see she told The
count that her fathers partner hat
robbed him of nearly all his wealth
just to test his love for her. Mayme-
And then? Edyth-He asked her fol
letter Of introduction to the daughter
of her fathers partner.-Chicag g
News.
JOHNNY wish my folks would
agree upon one thing and not keel
me all the time in worry. Tommy
What have they been doing now
Johnny-Mother won't let me stant
on my head, and dad is all the TIM
fussing because l wear my shoes on
so fast.
Mistress Geturning from holiday
Why, Bridget, whatever has becOm
of the parrot? Bridget-Well, you see
mum, after you left it looked hi
pining like and didn't talk much. S
the cook and I put it out of its m sery
poor thing, and I had it stuffed 70
my new 'at.-Judy.
"They say" said Mrs. OldcastlC
that Mr.. Fadd'ethwaite, who use
to belong to our church, has becom
an agnostic" as that so? Josia
used to take his lunch at the sam
place he did down town. and he say
he often warned him that he'd get
if he didn't give up eatin' so fast
Chicago Record Herald.
They had been married only thre
short weeks, and he was actually il
terested in his paper at the Dime
table. Darling" she began in a ton
meant to be reproachful, do you low
me just as much as you ever did?
"Sure thing" he answered briefly
, She ought to have been satisfied t
: let it go at that, but she WASH
''Why?" she asked. Don't know,
he replied. "Just a fool habit I've &c
into, L suppose" Then for seventea
consecutive seconds silence reigne
upreme.-Chicago News.
At the first performance on the ne'
church organ no one in the aud'enc
was better pleased than the maid g
ployed in the organist's family. IS
you liked the music, did your Mary
said the organist the next mornln,
reports of her enthusiasm havin
reached his ears. "Oh, it was us