The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1904-07-17

l "
| gold and studded with the gems OF COL
conda last Monday, they couldn't have
been any more highly priced that, were
Tho printed sheets which came to old
Hanover when we oil got together to.
spew tobacco Juice and discuss the
strange doings OF the Democratic Con-
vention. So r. NE #
Up there we are nothing II not loyai--
nothing ifgnot good hntcrs, MS Dr. john
son would express IL But sakes aliye,sit IT,
jolted lis like ride In sttdebakes
wagon ovorH a corduroy. road, 10 realize
that sor1o OF tho men we most adored
had been playini football with our dear
little political golden calf, w. Jennings
Bryan. sSi II q y FL ss5s3 Il b
And more horrifying still. We read
where the golden calf In questioned
more appropriately the silvern calf-had3
l3belloWedl back defiance and had b,itted
right and left In his abortivo efforts to-
get more rope. s.
Plague my buttons II 1 knows t'other
from which" wildly exclaimed my Uncle
Buck Jcn kins after no had monopolised
the morning paper for half an hour while
We sat hungrlly# by on the pile of barbed
wire at the cross roads store and waited
| for our chance to get a peep ut the fasc-
mating columns. q 3. s5 sS
ut looks to ME like went to bed Sat-
urday night free silveritc and woke
Sunday morning to be q goldbug And
to think that + snoozed away that night
| jest us II nothin were n-happenln', With.
out even so much as bad dreams, where
MS things were "a turnin skin side inside,
and the very bottom was a-droppin, &o,ti
creauon--least wise tho Democrat party
which aztec all Is tho backbone of 8crea-
ton s N " " NJ VI Il n 4.
S53't Are you a going to bolt. Uncle lBuck?s
/ asked i as "a horrible thought 81 possible
disloyalty on the part OF that time gnarl-t
ed worthy flashed across my mind. s
| n" Bolt! ilThundcration!" yelled the old
man as he indisnationly whacked Mt n
lbottle fy which had settled III bis amber.
Tinted whiskers. How can bolt when
! don't know whnr i am Mt. Could a blind
colt bolt In a box car r. IA ,l s
m with the party sententiously re-
marked Cousin Hardin Tlmberlakc. who
had driven over from Ashcakc, .'leastwiseS
l will be when ketch up with tho party,
Though II I'm a goldbug thunder
stood that I'm no more responsible for
| tttthan "a Junebug Is for the green on his
backbone \. ts 3iyss "
They tell me John Daniel raised sand
with Jinnings Bryan and give him up.tke-5
country in committee remarked old man
Carter from the BeaYerdam section. 4 and,
that Jinnings let fly. some aockdolagers
at Dave Fill and tried to, all his pclt to-
tho Coliseum walls. There ain,t no two
ways about ono thing-evcry tarnation.
\ delegate in the gang seemed TO be 5a-tot-
ling a chip on his shoulder and a-spiling
| for trouble with everything that come
l,long. Guess they forgot to- open the
meetins with prayer or twas too long
between m eals. And even IA pa rson Will
cit snappy and bullheadcd oman empty,
stomache.
well, you all may argufy TIL Vol,
bust saueaked little, weevll-caten Silas$
Burke. OF the Poegreen nelg hborhood.$
but one fact remains as plain as a pike
staff. goldbug or no goldbug That fellow
Parker they put up is n good. clean man
even II the n wspa pers do call him a.
"Spink q Z " hatever. that is.
Yes, Eempmun. he's good. clean
man. continued silas. why! he had
| just come out the water nd was strip
stark naked when the reporters told him
that the nomination was his =. iEaS y one Of
your billed shirt high collar, KID gloves
for ledge Parker. Thar he was, putting
and a. BLOWN and a-spoutin In he creek
like a May colt, when up cor1ns "a {repor-I
ter and hollers from the adjoinin' black
berry bushes: liz .".Jedge, B4 I've got news
that II give you the high billlcum fips, and
send the ole lady into conniption. f ts.
Ibid the jedEe act kinder offs d and and
stuck-up and say 'cuses n m e "a end URN 3$ 81
1.-THE time i puts on my doeskin pants and ~
ISmy lowcut wcscoat and white il era va ~
Not a bit OF It, The dye is one Q { US
lUp he comes a-hikin, 1t, ards n the
shore, tlleS ga me as Adam would hays
done with a reporter. and vi thout so much
as saytnI: Is any lady on the committee' 81
| He swung fhisself to the shore BY q bunch
Iof cattails, scraped some dirt from pe 81
twixt his toes. whirled hisself around IN
L. 4 t1oE
could get shower bat HI and Il nxtouslyt
asked: Did the telegram come coll ect
3.,Did 1t r" sexcltedly asked tina t; fool, Ned
slnughter, who lives Just on the cross
roads beyond Bandana, and whose curl lr 7,
osIty could now withstand no impe'dili-T
ments. u. (. e 81,
.The paper don't say a bout hat ex s
planned the knowing sila SIT simply aye s
1.-THE jedge quietly went home and ina Z
1.-The boys In the village perpared for q
'monstration.''''Sss$ # u Il
"Don.t you pose he put on his clothes
i before he started back 4 to the y ouse!S
sanxiolslyl auered Uncle Buck Jenkins.
Ion that pint the paper falls 70 specl-
lsfy,9 replied tho SALEM Silas, Tor jest
+ las got to the place W y 9 1edge.; WINS
4 .bout to read the teleg I'M, and " mere
i he orter been hlsting up his ga luses, ! ne
paper says Continued on page g. b.
il 4T"Wan't 1T Kinder short IN the Jedge
to lay low and sa wood all that day and
i then bust loose late at highway yon-
4 der bout 8 O'Clock when all hands was was
dead beat out and 3sleepy---and say that
he wouldn't tech the Ebizness viii "a ff
4 ty-foot pole exceptin, all hands come 5out
nat-footed for gold r? queried a tena cious.
died in the-wool silyerite from on fs down Y
near the Goochand line. 4. 81
Is3l,'Well, II guess the jedg old lady had
to have think over the matter, plped
old man John Scott, who. though q baeh ?,
t|lor, always pokes fun at WlmmentolKs
and the way married men are Spossed,
iAnd you know a man can max { oxen
trot 2:4o on a plank road fore ne can (! glt
a move on the pokey pettlcoat gcritters's.
This solution OF the prob EN- neithe an
swered the questlopEn nor provoked 'mlrth,
for Hanover folks, oven when they re- a as
\ peart as crlckets. always ia ke tlme %
think before they la ugh e q JOKE, g ana =
4 what's more, it DID seem ki nder 81 ort 10
most Of the silyerites that the 9sdge was 5
so ba elk ward In coming forward IL 1,
Darn my hide ~ 4 don't believe We J, y!
a has been fl!mtiammed,, '' suddenly yellea
n 10 a