The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1904-10-01

Ask ten people the question which
heads this article, and you Will In
variably find that nine of them will
answer in the affirmative. Further
more, they will tell you that marriage
ages a woman, in addition to detract-
ing from her good looks. And look
ing round ones circle OF married
friends and acquaintances. 1t would
seem that there is great amount OF
truth in this assertion.
Girls who before their marriage
were considered extremely pretty,
bright and vivacious, seem to have de-
veloped, in the short space of three
or four years, into unattractive and
uninteresting women. How she has
changed" is the remark one frequent
ly hears applied to the young wife.
No longer Is she the neat, w1nSOme
little woman we knew during her sim
gle days. That charm which made
her the center of so much admiration
seems to have totally disappeared. She
has disappointed U.s. and we cannot
help regretting that she ever entered
the bonds of matrimOny which seem to
have brought about SO great change.
OF course, one cannot expect wife
to always retain that beauty which
made her so attractive as an unmar-
ried girl of nineteen or twenty. Inc
duties and responsibilities OF married
life are bound to bring about some
change. But does it necessarily fol-
low that it should be for the worse
and not for the better?
1t may not be possible for wife to
always exhibit that freshness which
characterized her girlhoOd, owing to
the cares Of wifehood and motherhood.
But there is practically only one rea-
son-which l will mention hereafter
why marriage should be allowed to
make women ugly or unattractive In
other respects. In most cases the
fault is to be found, not In the fact
that she has married, but in the wom-
an herself. If you see a wife who
seems to have lost all her attractive
ness and personal charm since mar
riage, you will probably find, In the
majority of cases, that she herself Is
responsible for the deficiency.
There are hundreds of bright, bloom
ing young matrons in this country
whose charms are a direct denial to
the assertion that marriage makes
women ugly. These are women who
have not allowed matrimony to take
away their good looks. In a word,
they have never ceased to take pride
In themselves. That is the secret OF
their perpetual youth. They take as
much interest in their appearance and
good looks five and ten years after
marriage, as they did before meeting
the man they ultimately welded.
Vanity, you say. Maybe, but such
vanity is to be recommended in every
wife.
Did every woman follow such exam
pies, matrons, spinsters, bachelor girls.
and even cynical bachelors themselves,
would be forced to confess that mar
rage was an aid to beauty.
What a number of women there are
who Immediately they are married
seem to think that there is no need
to add to their attractiveness. Maybe
it is the thought that now they are
married it is not necessary to make
any special efforts to retain the love
and admiration of their husband. Con-
sequently they drift into a state of in
difference regarding themselves. No
greater mistake could be made, and
many a wife has had to deplore the
lost affection and respect of her hus-
band on account of such personal ne
glect
The one reason why some women
lose their beauty after marriage, for
which they are not to blame, Is that of
unhappiness. The essential thing to
wOman's beauty is happiness. A
weeks fretting will age her to an as
tonishing degree, whine a real unhap-
piness robs cheeks and lips Of color,
eyes Of light and life, and destroys all
the soft rounded curves of winsOme
femininity. Joy, comfort and repose
are the three true aids 10 feminine
beauty, and, of course. a woman who
becomes careworn and tired-looking,
while premature gray hairs and wrin-
kles make her appearance. through the
unhappiness of her married life, earns
our sympathy instead of censure.
But the happily married woman only
becomes ugly through her own fault
She alone is to blame if, after time,
friends and acquaintance commence
to criticise her appearance. And by
giving them the opportunity of so do
ing she is not acting fairly toward her
husband. For the natural conclusion
people come to, who see a great de-
terioration in a woman's looks after
marriage, is that she is unhappy, and
has more than her share Of domestic
troubles
There are anxieties and griefs, of
course, which must come to every
married woman, and which may pos
sibly leave traces in her good looks
But even this does not make her less
attractive in the eyes of her husband
and friends if she still maintains the