Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1904-08-10
RAT MAN WINS BATTLE
Bulldogs and Ferrets Cause Relief fo,
Government Scientists.

The Japanese-Russan war. the troubles
between the United States and Turkey. and
even the forthcoming battle of the ballots
between Roosevelt and Fairbanks and Par
ker and Davis have been more than over
swallowed at the Agricultural Department
curing the past week or ten days, where
there mas been fierce and persistent battle
between trained ferrets, dogs and rats A
pattle royal has been in vogue and there
mas peen no war correspondent to chronicle
the great victories on one side and the
heartrending defeats that have finally rid
Uncle Sans graineries'' of a pest that
mas caused untold annoyance and a great
amount of expense. The battles have waged
with persistence. however, and now Uncle
sam can gloat over many scalps hanging
at his belt in the shape of rodents that
nave been reveling in feast of garden and
mower seeds for many months thereby de-
priving hard-worked members of Congress
from furnishing to their rustic constituents
the germs of life that make barren patches
spring into fertile plots
For many months the seed department at
the Department of Agriculture has been
overrun with rats of many sizes. There
were little rats and big rats, old rats and
young rats, rats with four legs and some
even go so far as to hint that some of the
rats had but two legs. However, be that
as 1t may, seeds disappeared with startling
rapid1ty and remedy was sought.
The scientists of the department were
questioned, learned heads were gotten to-
gether. Even DIR. Howard. the eminent en-
tomologlst, whose Speciality Is the destruc-
ton of insects, was called upon for sug-
gestion for sending the rodents Off by the
gaseous route. But no means could be
found that would not cause a tremendous
amount of time and a loss in work to the
various clerks. AS the farmers were call
ing for their seeds, preparatory to the fall
planting, and were tnsstent in their de-
once. 1t was seen that the work must con-
tinue even though much seed left the de-
partment by the rat route.
Happy thought" said young Mr.. Wilson,
the son Of the Secretary of Agriculture, as
one of the menials approached his sanctum
sanctorum. "Methinks have seen a large
bulldog with a cage full of ferrets hanging
from his under jaw roaming the streets OF
Washington. Perchance he could help us
out of our predicament and thus save the
rustic constituents from further pulling the
hirsute adornment from their chns in their
nervous excitement at a delay in furnishing
the seeds that can be gotten for the asking
by ''our congressman" HE We to him. my
boy. Say to him that the agriculturists are
in dire distress and need his assistance
forthwith. Tell him we beg of him to
hurry and set us free from this horrible IN
vasion, by which the situation at Port Ar
thur is the veriest bagatelle by comparison.
Say to him that our siege guns are OF no
avail, even If our board of strategy had not
exhausted it's efforts and its patience and
the shortage in supply grown more apparent
daily. Tell him that We throw ourselves on
his mercy and beg that he Will not leave us
In our distress. Hurry, man, hurry; else
another bushel of seed will have been car
ried away by the reckless rodents.
The rat man came. the rat may saw, the
rat man conquered.