Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1904-05-21
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-'i"eAlel 'foiuhsii-N mere nave you
been, Willie? Willie-Only just around
the globe, ma.-Chicago News.
Emeline-Sara and l can hardly IN
derstand each other over the Telephone.
Edgar-Well, talk one nj time.
Know him? should say So. We
are MISUNDERSTANDING" En- "Opr
wives were divorced from the Sam.
man. Elk.
'She told me that l might hope
Better look out. I've known girls 10
say that when they intended to ACCEPT
a chap. Puck
Smith has lost his job, and I'm
hustling to get him another" You
are: Yes. l owe him ten dollars
and I'm afraid he'll be needing it
Puck.
Stranger-Seems to me this crowd
ell street is a queer place for hospi
tai. Natiye-WelI, l don't know Two
trolley lines meet here.-New York
Weekly.
How did you get your black eye.
Sambo:" We'll, boss, yer see | was
out a-lookin' fer trouble and dis ere
eye was de fust TO find it'--Yonkers
| Statesman.
Phlanthropist-Why did You change
the title of The Ladies' Home to
"Old Ladies Home? Mrs Du Goods
1t was becoming too crowded.-New
York Weekly.
Parker-We've moved again Barker
/ You have? parker-Yes; the chill
dren were so noisy that we couldn't
stand what the neighbors said about
them.-Detroit Free Press.
Young LADY, can always tell your
work the instant l see it. Magazine
artist (delightedl-Can you, really
Young lady-Easily The women all
look alike.-New York Weekly.
Woman is naturally of a clingms
nature" observed he. Yes" rejoincd
his wife, but she isn't to be compaI-
ed with Il man when it comes to hold
ing on to a So bill.'-New Yorker.
Sam Shtnbone-Ise thinkin' Oh
marrying dat youngest Jackson gal.
Nose Johnson-Don't do it. niger
don't do it. Why, dat gal never KEEP
4 job for over two weeks in her life
En-.
! Prospective Benedict-Are you Will
ing to become everything or nothing
for my sake? Prospective Bride
Yes, if you leave out the nothing"
part of the observation-disclosures
F.. American.
Bring me some coffee" said Mr..
Nurox, as he finished his dessert.
'Demi-tasse:" inquired the waiter.
Sure, if that's the best you sot. and
say. bring one o them little pots full
Of it. "-Philadelphia Press.
You are always more or less skep-
teal about what you see in print
Yes" answered the man who has his
own ideas about things. Truth may
be at the bottom of a well. but il isn't
IN ink Washington Star
Husband (of popular authorl-Do
you mean to tell me, doctor, that my
wife is insane? Doctor-No. not So
bad as that, but she is hopelessly fool
ish. Husband-Wcli, that's a relief
| was afraid her usefulness as a writer
was impaired-Life
A prison visitor recently asked one
of the prisoners how he came to be
there. Want" was the answer.
How was that pray" well. l want
I'd another mans watch. He wasn't
willing | should have it, and the judge
wants me to stay here five years. -
Tit-Bits.
Footinitt (energetically helping Mt
bazaarl-Won't you put in for a rattle
for this cushion? Eisitor-Oh. no,
thanks. Footinitt-Of course. its
rather useless and gaudy and 50 forth;
and personally 1 think the designs
rotten. But do put in for ii. Visitor
No. thanks. l made it.-Punch.
Little Willie, who is a Philadelphia
boy. had been watching a dog chasing
his tail for three minutes. Papa" be
asked, what kind of dog is that"
That" said the father, is n watch
dog" Willie was silent 4 moment.
Well" he finally said, from the time
he takes to wind himself up / guess
he must be a Waterbury watch dog.
II nll2uelpIld Ledger
Mrs Househunter-This house does
not seem to be very substantially built.
Even the floor shakes when we walk
on it. Agent-But. madam, this floor
iS-er-the very latest thing in SPRING
dancing floors. Al the newest houses
have them. Mrs. Househunter-And
the stairs creak terribly. Agent-uh
we don't make any extra charge for
those patent burglar-alarn stairs,
madam.-Chicag go News.
Dick-Say-se a letter Of mine
lying around, gray envelope: Sweep
stops making the bedl-Do y0n mean
a letter starting off. Dearest Idckie.
and asking you TO come down and
spend Sunday. and telling you hoW
I lonely She has been all the week. anu