New-York tribune., 1904-10-24
THE TALK OF THE DAY.


says The Ravenswood CaIo) Gazette: smith
q Smith. editor and wife of this sheet, departed
night for Minneapolis. St. Paul. Chicago
and few other way stations up north. II this
paper contains anything that makes you feel fussy
bear in mind the devil is too busy TO attend 20
your this week. and hold of until next Friday
Smith is pledged 20 be back by then
AS Indicnted-''say. mister" Queried the tramp
got a ole pair NV pants wot youse could gimIne?'
II don't know" replied the man on the front
Don't trouble 1ts yersef. mister said the hobo
as he started 70 move on sEf youse hev got lat
hersef"-(chicago News.
The inhabitants Of swindon. England. are ner-
vous and uneasy The boys OF the town. according
TO THE London GIObe.' have formed themselves
into organization which Insists honesty. kind
ness to dumb animals. obedience to parents, keep
ing the commandments. no lighting. not acting in
a eowardly manner or robbing birds nests. The
grown up members OF the community feel that
their juniors must have hit upon some brand new
and hitherto undreamed Of form Of ieviItry II they
are tired Of all their other pleasures
FOOTBALL LYRICS.
THE CENTRE RUSH
WSose s ssn5ns ansds is PSTeTfq s Tgn to man fsn
At least. opponents think IT So
AS DER the ball he bendeth low
They say things quite unlike prayer.
They know he cannot well resent it,
Though he replies as If he meant it,
THE GUARD
This object has the guard. it seems.
The fellow who opposes him.
He acts with eageTness and vim
And lands full many vicious punch
Where rests his rivals frugal Iuncn-
THE END RUSH
He stands alone upon the wing
And crouches like cat 70 spring
Upon the man who tries 70 30
Around his end. He tackles low
And ry6s the runner IN the dirt
P@ePriving @ him Of half half his shirt en-
or ne VIII drop upon the ball.
THE QUARTERBACK
Although diTninutive in size.
In him the combination lies
ana drives the HS ot6sT iS side a S Ta2 back
He stands behind the husky line
And shouts a caballstic sign
WS.6 HIS team IN 1ss is gre!sy sure 70 sGGrs
THE COACH
The freshman. thinks he is a god
And even seniors oft are awed
When he throws out his giant chest
'Tis he invents the box Of tricks
That put opponents in fix
And when the whistle calls to play
He RACES like wolf at bay.
Well players know that nothing worse is
Than being targets for his curses
-CCincinnati Commercial Tribune.
American tourists returning from Europe bring
back stories OF the paternaI watch which Is kept
upon them In Germany. One woman was requested
by a policeman TO hold up her gown. which was
a trailing. elaborate affair OF lace and chiffon. Il
was after dinner. and she taking stroll with
her husband through a park whose immaculate
walks seemed TO offer no harm to it's deicaey. so
she let il hang. The policeman polite enough.
He Informed her gravely that any dress that was
allowed to trail liable to coIlec- undesirable
matter and prove injurious to health. and he re-
minded her that time law under
slderation 20 make the wearing Of such skirts
A Slight nagan-And Jingley, What's
become of him? There a big hearted. generous
fellow.
Holmes-oh he's married now. and all that's
changed.
HOmagan-Why, when I knew him only a few
years ago he could always be depended upon to
share his last dollar with You.
HOlmeS-Well, you depend upon him
share your last dollar with him.-(PhiladslPhia
Press,