The La Jara chronicle., 1904-10-14
IAN N,ARTFUL DODGER
JUDGE PARKER'S OsxTERiTY IN
THE Art OF EVASION
A Few Reflections Upon the Demo-
cratic Caudidate's Letter of Aceep-
tance Document that Docs NOT
Convince the Reader.

convince the Rcaucr.
Few people outside OF those politically
interested will be found who claim to
have waded through all OF Alton b.
Parkcr's letter OF acceptance. Those
who have performed the feat must ad-
NIT fatigue. Although the tone of the
letter is more clear and emphatic thah
that of the nerveless and insipid speech
OF acceptance. it is without that supreme
quality which fixes attention. As one
reads the mind walders. The perform
ance. in short, is not convincing.
In some passages there is mar&ed evi-
dence of the foxy cleyerness Of David
Bennett Hill. Here is the voice oil
Jacob indeed, but the hand is the hand
Of Eslu. Bat. even with the injection
OF Hill there is little in the document
to ward off the gentle Influences OF
slumber-land.
In his remarks upon "Imperialisin,'
intended to be impressive. the judicial
candidate succeeds only in being solemn
and dull, and his hong words and long
sentences lead nowhere. for he gives no
instances of the violation of the liber-
tics and Constitutional rights he is 80
anxious to uphold. He merely winds
round and round The subject se has
tutional VS.. Imperialism" and ends
abruptly with a general aud scattering
fire upon an imaginary "determiuei. ani'
bilious and able executive" who might,
could, world or should do something
real devilsh'' some day, IL the Rspub-
Leans are retained in power.
Will Not Follow Democrats.
And the statesman OF Esopus forgets
a good many things, or. possibly he
doesn't forget. Perhaps he never knew
much about the history of the people OF
the United States.
SHALL WE FOLLOW THE
FOOTSTEPS OF OUR FATHERS
ALONG THE PATHS OF PEACE.
PROSPERITY. AND CONTENT
MEN, he asks.
NOT UNDER THE LEADERSHIP
OF THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY,
comes many-vOiced reply.
When has the Democratic party ever
led among the pleasant fields of peace
along the streams of prosperity where
fed the fat hocks OF contentmentI
PEACE!
What party plunged this nation into
| such a war of Rebellion as the world
has never seen, and kept it there, at
untold expense of blood and tears and
treasure for four long years?
PROSPERITY!
What party undermined the wealth
and productive force the credit and the
industrial life of the United States to
the appalling conditions of 1893, con-
ditiOns which go worked upon the minds
of men as TO render them easy victims
to the schemes and visions of the silver
craze of 1896.
CONFINEMENT!
haS it
bosom all the tireless agitators, the dis
turbcrs, cranks and misanthropic pessi-
mists, who have had full hand in
full country.
Save us from the Democratic version
of peace, prosperity and contentment.
Further EMISSIONS.
In his utterances upon the Imperial"
bogy Mr.. Parker is gushing. When it
gets to the tariff he settles down into
the jog-trot of party dullhess ana fJg.
| In his discussion of pension order, No.
as, he begins dodging questions with
| neat dexterity, and he keeps this up.
with varying success throughout the let
| ter, executing n grand sumnersault when
whizzing by the trusts.
The amusing assumption OF Republi-
can ideas on the Panama Canal, the
irrigation of arid lands, foreign relations
| anu American citizenship need no COM
! ment. They constitute what is an old
story to Republicans. but may come
as a revelation to Democrats.
| Following President Roosevet's ex-
ample, Mr.. Parker winds up his letter
| with eight or ten questions, but in select
| ing the questions Mr.. Parker departed
from the excellent model at first chosen
and asks only questions which answer
themselves.
II is comforting to be assured that
the Democratic candidate and his asso-
ciates await the peoples verdict with
calmness AMI confidence"
So do the people themselves. especial
ly the Republicans among them There
is really nothing to got furriel about;
nothing to scare the most timid Demo-
crat in the bunch of scary brethren.