davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1904-08-18
WON PROMOTIONS BY PuNs.
clersymen Who have Been Rewarded
for Their Faeetlousness,

T. P,'s Weekly.-Cauon Melville,
who died the other day in his ninety,
second year owed his earliest promo
ton To- a pun When the late earl OF
Dudley, who knew Mir. Melville sur
iciently 10 remember that his Chris,
ttan name was David, had a living at
nis disposal, he received letter con,
tanning only the words: Lord. remem.
Der David" The earl's reply was no
less terse and scriptural; Thou arr
the mani"
Perhaps the earliest instance OF
ecclesiastical promotion won by a pun
is that of n curato named Joseph, who
was prompted by Swift to take this
text for sermon preached in st,
PatricRs cathedral, Dublin, before the
viceroy, Butler" the duke Of Or,
mond; yet did not the chief Butlen
remember Joseph, but forgot him"
Rev, DR. Mountain, who was the son
of bcggar, owned nearly every step
of his successive promotions in great
part 10 his facetiousncss, and won the
last step of all by n single Jest.
when he was consulted as bishop OF
Durham by George II. as to tho fittest
person TO FIJI the vacant archipiscopal
see OF York, he replied: Sir hads,
thou faith as a grain of mustard seed,
thou wouldst say To this mountain
dramatically striking his breasU
BE thou removed and cast into this
sea (seel," That George H. should
so understand and appreciate the
Joke as to accept It's suggestion lie
perhaps the strangest part of the
story,
Apropos OF puns, promotion and the
see OF York, here is a good story OF 4
| living given by an archbishop of forl
in reward for an impertinent persona
pun, The archbishop. Sir William
Dawes. entertained his clergy a,
dinner shortly after the death of his
wife Mary, who appears to have beer
n regular Mrs rroudle at once to his
grace and to the diocese Az dinner
the archbishop apologized, with sigh
for things not being in the apple.pi'
order that prevailed when his dear
dead wife, Mary. was alive, Belnl
himself an inveterate punster, HI
added, with sad shake Of his head
She, indeed was Mare Pacihcum
A curate who knew too well what /
tartar the deceased lady was, re
joined, AYE, my lord, but she wal
first Mare Mortuum!" and wal
absolutely and Immediately rewarde,
by the archbishop for this impertInen
pun with living Of $500 n year,
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1904-08-18

) Only One !
: CHARLES ~ Love s
) CARVICE
s s
EI-1H.aN..ac..--1N-

wish? Consider, she, who was once a
child, is now woman, DO you think
it possible 10 keep her imprisoned in
this wood Tor the whole of her days."
Gideon Rofe turned toward the
window. For the first time stephen
had found a weak spot in his armor,
Ii was true, Already She was begin,
ming to pine and hunger for the
world, Could he keep her much
longer?
Come" said stephen, quick to see
the impression he had made. DO not
let us he selfish; let us think of her
welfare. as well as our own wishes.
Candidly. must confess that | should
be perfectly willing to leave her in
her present ohScurity."
Gideon Rolfe broke in abruptly.
Where viii You take her?"he asked,
hoarsely.
1T is my intention,' he said ito
place here in my mothers charge.
She lives in London, alone. There
my cousin will find loving home and
a second mother. Believing that you
would naturally have some reluctance
at parting with her, not knowing with
whom and where she was going,
have brought my mother with me-"
Gideon glanced at the quiet, motion
less figure seated on the bench out
side. and then paced the room again.
Does she know?" he asked hoarse
~.
She knows nothing" said stephen
My mother can trust me implicitly
She has long wanted a companion, and
| have told her that know of young
girl in whom | am interested"
You intend to keep her secret p
said Gideon.
Most sacredly." responded Stephen
with solemn earnestness.
Gideon went to the door and openet
it.
Wait" he said, and disappeared
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1904-08-18
A QUARTET OF IFS.

I'd like TO hear the Mauser crack.
The lannon's Humorous tone,
II could do the hearing by
Long distance telephone,
I'd like TO fight the Russian hold
With wild and fendish grin
II could wear some armor plate
And uniform Of tin.
I'd like TO help the Japanese
At morning, night and noon,
II |, quite oGt of reach, could fight
Anoat in balloon.
I'd like TO camp out In the fields
With all the men Of might
II could eat at hotel
And sleep at home at night
Judge.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1904-08-18
CHAPTER XIII.

Stephen rose softly and watched
him from behind the window curtains
until Gideon had vanished amongst
the trees; then Stephen went out and
smiled down upon his mother with the
air of man who had just succeeded
in accomplishing some great work for
the good of mankind at large.
Sorry to keep you waiting,
mother" he said. Il have been max
ing some arrangements with the
worthy man, her father
Mrs. Davenant looked up with the
nervous deprecatory expression which
always came upon her face when she
was in the presence of her son.
1T does not matter, Stephen am
glad to rest. Where has the man
gone? He-he-doesn't he look rather
superior for his station, and why does
he look so sirn and forbidding?".
"A life spent in solitude, away from
the world, has made him reserved anG
cold" replied stephen, glibly, and,
of course, he feels the parting from
his daughter"
Poor man-poor girl" murmured
Mrs Davenant
stephen looked down at her with a
contempIative smile, while his ears
were strained for the returning foot,
steps of Gideon Rolfe.
Yours is sweetly sympathetic
nature, my dear can already
foresee that the poor girl will not
long need anyone's sympathy, You
are already prepared to open your
arms and take her to your heart Il
it not so?"
Mrs. Davenant looked up-iust as
If she wanted to see what he expected
of her to say, and seeing that he
meant her to say yes said it,
Eyes. shall be very glad to have
a young girt--a good young girl-as a
companion, Stephen. My life has
been very lonely since you have been
away
And | may be away so much But
mother, you will not forget what \
said during our drive? There are
special reasons why the girls
antecedents should not be spoken of
The friend who interested me in her
wishes her to forget, II possible
everything concerning her early life :"
4 understand, Stephen"
And, by the way, do not allow any
expression of establishment TO escape
you if, when you see her, you feel
astonished at her appearance or man
ner Remember that she has spent all
her life here. buried in the forest, hei
sole companions, a woodsman and his
wife"
Her mother and father said Mrs.
Davenant
Il said her mother and father. did |
not? Just so--her mother and father.
We'll, We must not expect too much.
And after all, 1t will be far more IN
teresting for you to have a fresh and
unsophisticated nature about you. al.
though she may be rather rough ana
rustic"
= shall be quite content II she is a
good girl
Just So Virtue rs precious gem
though incased in a rough casket'
Gideon Rolfe had returned. but not
alone Emerging from the deep
shadow Of the trees was what looked
to their astonished and unprepared
eyes vision Of some wood nymph
Gideon Rolfe strobe forward. his
lace set hard and sternly cold and as
NJ reached the cottage be took Una's
hand In his, and looking steadily into
Stephens eyes. said:
The Bolivar bulletin. (Bolivar, Tenn.) 1888-1946, 1904-10-14
RUSSIAN GRATIFICATION
The Postponement of the Proposed
Peace Conference PleaSes
Russia.
Hope Expressed That American
Journals Will Give Up Discussion
of UnsOIicited Intervention.

st. Petersburg. Oct. while not
Withholding praise for the American
spirit of desiring to do things, the
Bourse Gazette expresses qualification
that President Roosevelt's idea Of
calling a peace conference to an ac-
compartment of the thunder of can
non has apparently been ship
wrecked"
I'VE hope" the Gazette says. that
this Will induce the American journals
to give up the discussion of unsolicited
Intervention in the Russo-Japanese
war in any shape or form. It Is q
mistake to suppose that we are in the
same position as in 1877, when we had
the open enmity of Austria and could
not rely upon the friendship of Ger
many. The attitude of Austria, Ger
many, France and Italy is no longer
cause for anxiety. No one knows
when the war will end. There will
come a time when Japan will be con-
fronted with the might Of the whole
Russian nation; then she will meet the
fate of Genghis Khan
The question of sending the Baltic
sea fleet to the far east by way OF
Cape Horn is advocated by a strong
party at the admiralty. on the ground
that after passing the Strait of Magel-
Ian their progress could not be dogged
and reported by cable. The colliers
could rendezvous at the South Sea and
the other smaller Pacific islands. The
main risk would be that in the vast
stretch the vessels might be beaten
of their track, and the danger Of a
serious breakdown of some of the
ships, although the transport Kan.
chatka Is equipped with appliances for
the making of extraordinary repairs.
The selection of this route would be
tantamount to a decision not to reach
V1adivostok until spring, a long voy-
age requiring economical speed for at
least four months.
The Bolivar bulletin. (Bolivar, Tenn.) 1888-1946, 1904-10-14
TOWN TERRoRIzED BY FIREBUes
Blue Ridge, Ga. Sends for Blood
hounds to Chase Incendiaries.

Knoxville, Tenn, Oct. 9.-Excite-
ment is running high at Blue Ridge,
Ga. over attempts to fire many build
ingS.
Citizens have organized and are pa
trolling the town day and night, armed
with shotguns and lOking for f1rebugs.
Bloodhounds were ordered from Chat
tanooga and traced two men to their
homes. They were both jailed, but
there is no other evidence against
them. More than a dozen houes, in
Guiding the home of Supt. c. w. Brad
shaw, of the A. X. & N, railroad, have
been fired. but the flames were ex-
tinguished with little loss in all but
two instances.
So far there has been no theory ad-
vanced as to the identity of the fire.
bugs. Several negroes have been sus-
pected but no positive proof has been
found that the f1ends are black
The entire community is terrorizeAL
over the outrages and women anc
children are living in. mortal terror OF
disaster. while the men are bending
all their efforts to the task of ferret
ing out the miscreants before any
more serious harm is done.
The Bolivar bulletin. (Bolivar, Tenn.) 1888-1946, 1904-10-14
WHOLE ROYAL FAMILY.
Taken to RevaI to Bid the Baltic
Fleet Farewell

Taken to RevaI to Bid the Baltic
Fleet Farewell.
st. Petersburg, Oct. S.-The imperial
household proceeded today from Peter
hof to the palace at Tsarskoe-Se
from the latter place this evening a
special train carried the emperor, the
empress and the heir-apparent to
Reval, where Sunday and Monday will
be spent in an inspection of the fleet.
This is the first journey of the en-
press and the heir-apparent from Peter
hof. Every arrangement had been
made for the safety and comfort of
the royal infant on the journey. The
train was heated to exactly ga degrees
Farenheit, and the household physi-
clans and relays of nurses were in at
tendance. The train did not stop at
Reval, a special siding having been
constructed to the shore of the harbor.
Upon leaving the train the party went
directly aboard the royal yacht, which
will be their home for the next two
days
The emperor carried to Reval fifty
two ikons, one for each ship in the
harbor. 1t is now understood that the
contemplated imperial trip to Skierne-
vice has been abandoned. and that the
party will remain at TSarskoe-Selo
throughout the remainder of the
autumn
The Bolivar bulletin. (Bolivar, Tenn.) 1888-1946, 1904-10-14
THE WORLDS BUSINESS
ALL NATIONS EXPORTS AGGRE-
GATE TEN BILLION.
THE UNITED STATES BIG SHARE
Internal Commerce of This Country
in a Single Yeer Also Amounted to
Twenty-Five Billion DoIlars-Re-
markable Statistics.

Washington, Get. 9.-StatisticS as
to the worlds commerce for the latest
year for which figures are available
have just been completed and are
published in the annual report of the
chief of the bureau of statistics of the
department of commerce and labor.
1t shows the total exports of all ma
tions of the world to be in the latest
year available SO, ,515 100000. and
the value of the total imports of all
nations $f0,SO9, 100000. The chief of
the bureau of statistics also estimates
the value of the articles forming the
internal commerce of the United
States at about 22,O00,0O0,00O in a
single year.
Europe, of course, supplies very
large proportion of the worlds in
ternal commerce, both as to exports
and imports. The exports of Europe
amount to s6,49S, 100000 out of a
total of s1O.515, 100000; exports of all
the countries of the world and her
imports are $S,301 900, 900, out Of to-
tai of $11, sos, 900 900 of the total i'm
ports of all the countries of the
world. Thus Europe's total internal
commerce, combining imports and eX-
ports, amounts to practically $15,000,-
100000 out of a total of $22, 900 000,-
600 of combined imports and exports.
Of the $S,3O1 zoo, 900 of imports. into
Europe s1,2O2 100000. or 144S per
cent are from the United States, and
of the S4,49S 100000 of exports $407,-
S58,00O, or 6.27 per cent were sent to
the United States. Of the total i'm
ports of North America, other than
the United States, which amounted to
$437,476. 900, $237, ,903, 900, or 54.3S per
cent was from the United States, and
of the exports of North America, eX-
elusive of the United States, which
amounted to $417, ,2O6,OO0 S2O9, ,464,00
or 5O.25 per cent, were sent to the
United States. OF the S349, ,691 600
imports of South America, $43,S7S, 600,
or 1855 per cent, were from the
United States, and of the total eX-
ports of South America of S537 49,
900, $107 ,161 900, or 1894 per cent
were sent to the United States. Oi
the total imports of Asia. amounting
to s1,OO1, 100000, 46,73S, 900, or 4.66
per cent we're from the United States
and of the exports from Asia, amount
ing to s1,O29 ,O99, 900, S112, ,231 900, OF
1921 per cent went TO the United
States. OF the imports of Oceanica
Inclusive of Hawai), amounting tC
1892, ,1O7 900, S34, 4,S55,000, or 1898 pei
cent, we're from the United States
end of the exports, amounting to
s30e, 7SS, 900, $27,07C 600, or SIT pei
cent, were to the United States.
OF the imports of Africa of S436.
256, 900, $24,333,O 900, or 5,5S per cent
were from the United States. and OF
the exports of S2SS, ,4S3 900, $6,457 900
or 2.24 per cent, were sent to the
United States.
The Bolivar bulletin. (Bolivar, Tenn.) 1888-1946, 1904-10-14
CHICAGO is TURNED LOOSE
Tens of Thousands of Chicagoans
Descend Upon st. Louis to OBJ
serve Chicago Day.

st. Louis. Oct ten thousand
Chfcagoans invaded st. Louis, Friday,
and marched upon the Worlds fair.
There were battalions, regiments, com
panies, squads and corps, and they
stormed the exposition gates until the
turnstiles groaned.
The Union League club, the Stan
dard club and the Press club arrived
in three special trains at the Wabash
Worlds fair station early Friday morn
ing.
At Union station the Illinois Manu-.
facturers' association, the Illinois, Iro-
quois, Lakeside and Germania clubs
came in special trains.
The 10000 who arrived Friday are
only the vanguard of thousands OF
others who will arrive in st. Louis.
Friday night and Saturday morning.
Mayor Carter Harrison heads the
bunch.
The Bolivar bulletin. (Bolivar, Tenn.) 1888-1946, 1904-10-14
PERIsHE0 AT VIRGINIA BEACH.
Niece of Former Postmaster General
Drowned While Bathing.

Norfolk, Va, Oct. 9.-Miss Bessie
Wilson, of Clarksburg, w. Va, niece
of the late VIM. L. Wilson, former
postmaster general, and afterward
president of Washington and Lee Uni
versity, was drowned while bathing at
Virginia Beach this afternoon. Her
body was recovered. Miss Mary "il-
son. of Charlestown, w. Va. daughter
of the former postmaster general, Miss
Mary NJ. Simpson, of Buchanan, Va,
Miss Eliza Dillon of Indian Rock, Va.
and Miss Louise Latimer, of Washing
ton, sister of Lieut.. Julian l.. Latlmer,
u. S. N, were rescued by United States
life-Savers and are in a serious con-
dition at the Princess Anne hotel, but
will recover. The party went into the
surf accompanied by E. Stormont,
resident of the beach. He was teach
ing them to float, and before he was
aware of It several of the young wom-
en- had drifted beyond their depth and
were in danger of drowning. Mr.. Stor-
mont swan to the shore and launched
a small surf boat He succeeded in
getting Miss Mary Wilson, Miss Simp-
son. Miss Dillon and Miss Latimer
aboard. Before he could reach Miss
Bessie Wilson the boat capsized.
Realizing his inability to save all the
party unaided Mr.. Stormont returned
to the shore and ran to the life-sav1ng
station Tor help. The crew immediate
1y launched the surf boat, and reached
the drowning girls in time to rescue
four, but when Miss Bessie Wilson
was picked up life was extinct.
The Bolivar bulletin. (Bolivar, Tenn.) 1888-1946, 1904-10-14
Smallpox Report.

The smallpox report for the period
from March 15 to September Is
submitted at last weeks meeting of
the State Board of Health shows
just 80 cases all over the State, but
during the six months there have
been 2,486 cases. OF this number
only SO died. Of the total number
Of cases the majority, as strange as
it may seem, were white people.
There were 1874 white cases and
Lip colored. During the six
months there have been 90 cases in
Davidson, as compared with 80 at
Memphis and 562 at Knoxville.
There was only one death in David
son county, but there were five
deaths in Knox and 33 in Shelby
county.
The Bolivar bulletin. (Bolivar, Tenn.) 1888-1946, 1904-10-14
STEAMER MINEOLA WRECKED
She Was Bound From PetrOpRvIOvsk
to San Francisco and Struck
n Sunken Reef.

San Francisco, Oct. THE Mer-
chants exchange has received a cable
dispatch from London stating that the
steamer Mineola, Capt. Kirkwoo1,
bound from Petropavlovsk, Siberia, for
this port, struck a reef off the Tigtl
bar on September 5 and become a to-
tai wreck.
The officers and crew were rescued,
and taken to Hakodate, Japan, by the
British warship Algerine.
The Mineola sailed from San Fran
cisco on July 10, with cargo of gen.
eral merchandise, for Petropavlovsk.
At the time Of her departure it was
intimated that she was carrying sup
plies destined for the use of Russian
troops in the field. The vessel was on
her return trip when she was wrecked.
The Bolivar bulletin. (Bolivar, Tenn.) 1888-1946, 1904-10-14
[ ennessee State News
The Weather and the Crops.

The report of the weather and
crop conditions for Tennessee, issued
by the Agricultural Department last
week, says:
Local showers which fell over a
large portion of the State last week
were followed by warm, dry weather,
with some of the highest temperatures
of the season, until about the close
of the week, when cooler weather,
with light local showers, succeeded in
giving a touch OF autumn. In many
sections the dry conditions continued,
greatly to the datriment Of Unmatured
crops and to the hindrance of the
usual preparations for the fall seed
ings. The week generally favored the
outside work of the season, such as
the gathering Of the maturing crops
Of corn, cotton, potatoes and tobacco,
and the saving of fodder and late hay
and this work was in full and rapid
progress. Where sufficient rain fell to
put the soil in proper condition plow-
Ing and seeding winter grains pro-
Eressed satisfactorily. Early corn is
showing a splendid crop and is be
Ing gathered; late corn, as rule, is
seriously affected by the drOuth and
the yield will be greatly Iessened
Cotton is opening rapidly under the
effects of the warm, dry weather, and
a large percentage of the crop is open
and ready for picking, which is pro-
crossing as rapidly as practicable un-
der the existing conditions of the sup
ply of labor. The crop has. lost much
from shedding, and the top crop is
considered very light in most places;
altogether, a considerable percentage
of loss from an average yield is esti-
mated. Tobacco has been about all
housed, and is being cured in fine
condition; the crop, while less in area
is of good quality. Large quantities
of fodder and peavine hay have been
secured in excellent condition. and
the amount of winter forage already
secured is favorable to the winter
ing OF stock. Sorghum making is in
full progress with fair results as to
yield and quality. Sweet potatoes are
being gathered. with generally fair
yields, although in the dry districts
the crop is considerably shortened. The
second crop of Irish potatoes has suf-
fered from the dry conditions N many
sections; in others the crop is fairly
good. Turnips, also, affected by the
dry weather, have made only slow
growth, and in some places will be
almost a failure. Quite a large area
has been seeded to rye. Sowing oats
is in progress where sufficient rain has
fallen to facilitate this work. IN the
r. FaiT TO
considerable extent. The fall crop of
apples is reported very inferior, as
q rule. The week closes dry and
cool. and good, general rain is much
needed.
The Bolivar bulletin. (Bolivar, Tenn.) 1888-1946, 1904-10-14
Mexico's Imports.

Mexico City, Oct S.-The silver
value of the national exports for the
fiscal year ended June 80 last are
S210,276,374; imports, silver value.
were S177.744,651. Gold bullion and
coin exported amounted to s1O,726
$50; total value silver exports in form
OF dollars, bars and ore, $79.O74.Ss9
The United States share of goods i'm
ported into Mexico is So per cent
American trade with Mexico is
steadily increasing in amount. Ger
many and England barely hold their
own.
The Bolivar bulletin. (Bolivar, Tenn.) 1888-1946, 1904-10-14
Tho Penitentiary System.

Gov. Frazier's references to the
penitentiary system obtaining in Ten
nessee have been telling blows, not
only to his opponent, but to the Re-
publican party in this State gener-
ally According to the records as ex
plotted by the governor, from 1860
to 1869, the penitentiary cost the tax
payers of Tennessee S459,746, or an
average loss of $114,936 year. Bring
ing the record up to a later day, the
books show that, under Gov. Hawkins,
in 1881 and 1882, the penitentiary only
yielded $41,500 a year. This, how
ever, was after the abolition by the
Democrats of the lease system-a
heritage of Republicanism.
On the other hand, last year, under
Democratic management, the peni
tentiary yielded to the State $195,OOC
net. 1t is pointed out by the Demo
cratic managers that, with the ex
ception of two years, the penitentiary
when under Republican administra
ton, was a source of expense, and
therefore, a burden to the taxpayers
whereas, now it is a source of revenue
Every we'll posted man understands
that this condition of affairs has beer
brought about by wise laws enacted
by Democratic legislatures and ap
proved by Democratic governors, and
the economic and honest conduct Of
the penitentiary Not only is this
true. but today the surroundings ol
Tennessee's convicts are better thar
those of any State in the Union-a
fact so conspicuous that frequently
prison commissioners or officials from
other States visit Nashville to inves
tigate the system which has proved sc
successful in the Volunteer State.
The Bolivar bulletin. (Bolivar, Tenn.) 1888-1946, 1904-10-14
Killed in a Mad PLUNGE.

PoUghkeepsie, n. Y. Oct. 9.-Five
persons were injured two fatally. in n
car OF the Poukeepsie & New PIatz
trolley line, which ran away on a steen
hill this morning. The passengers
with the exception of Mr.. and Mrs
Charles Clinton, of Highlands. jumped
but the couple remained on the car
until it toppled over an embankment
into creek. They were fatally hurt
Those who we're seriously injured bv
jumping were: Elijah Ward motor.
man; Charles Davis, conductor; An.
drew l. Rhodes. Of New Platz.