The Washington times., 1904-08-14

I nrst frightful months. I wonder now
that lived through II all
At hrst L had a long illness. NV
recovery was slow and l was glad when
! i, was discharged from the hospital. as
SrIei,I - ,,'s,' EaIS DetWeen my letters and
Isits were shorter when l was at work
outside and could earn more marks n
was only for my mothers sake that
wished TO live at all 1 had such a long
line line LOT ,i,. 'h9nght and the twenty min
trled my best to be patient and re-
signed 70 my fate. Thoughts OF wrong
IAd done often came into my mind
ana Sna the terrible way in which I was
Delhs made 10 expiate it. During those
long years / learned many q lesson I
needed, perhaps, to have learned during
my earlier life.
Living on Memory.
While waiting and striving for
brighter days. my mother. I felt. was
living on memory. for I am sure that IL
II mad not been for the thought that
her efforts were to help me 70 iibcrtv
she would have died / was a broken
woman and gazed on prison walls un-
III knew beauty and freedom only by
remembrance and regret. but I was In
nocent Of that for which I was being
punished was a convict indeed. but,
thank God. | was not a criminal
II Is Gods task to judge and ours
could not think what His plans and nur-
poses We're | tried to believe that thew
49, 49, sood, though l could not see how
eueTnlty Itself could make up for my
SuIicrings. God must / repeated 'or
ne would not allow IT. Maybe NV suf
Ierlng was intended to work ont qorne
great good 10 others by ways l should
never know until l saw with the clear
eyes OF another world. Still the ex
ternal conditions OF life acted cn nv
Dody and mind and l scarcely lxnayu
how to bear them
What wonder then that. sundered
worth living. spirit, courage nnJ msn-
TAI power which once were mine. leaving
me, my confidence was shaken and
seemed gone and my hopes were para
t 5yaGd as II were standing at :he open
Coming to This Country.
1t was a relief to get Mrs. Mayorick
now fearful and depressed, to speak of
the future.
Il shall go to America" she SAIL Ito
give testimony In a lawsuit there. IT
concerns some OF my mothers aud r.y
own lands Half an hour before the YER
dict was given at Liverpool I was told
10 sign certain document by my .hen
solicitor and I did so. Afterward I
found l had unknowingly signed my
property away, and ] am claiming II
again. This action will settle the u7ias-
tlon OF my right to the lands. Nearly
a million dollars is In dispute.
i shall feel safer when l get to
America. You can understand the Feel
Ing. think once in New York I shall
stay with friends until the law case Is
settled
And then what?" I asked
/ cannot quite say" came the faIter-
Ing reply. II can only hope. hope 1
may be permitted TO get some little com
pensation in the life TO come for the
life that has been wasted. 1 want change
Of SCENE. want to forget and I want
TO forgive. I have many kind-hearted
friends, and I should like TO spend some
time with them Then / shall travel
Shall l change my name? I don't
know. I am afraid / shall have little
peace while ] hold that OF Maybrick
but why should II be SO? Let me die out
OF memory
II have suffered enough. God knowsl
Make the rest OF my days as easy as you
can"
There was one more question before I
EFT. What OF the children-wOuld there
be a reconciliation?
1T Is too early to say" were Mrs
dRybrick's parting words as I left her
standing in the doorway with her gray
haired mother. There are 50 many,
many things TO be considered before
that can be decided"