New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1904-04-18
SYMPATHY WITH CHILDREN.
Ways in Which Parents Misinterpret Their
Motives and Ideals.

THE attitude of some parents toward God makes
Him appear to children high policeman, in
stead of a loving heavenly father" said Mrs.
Franklin ". Hooper at her recent conference at
the Brooklyn Institute. Mrs. Hooper told of an
incident which she said happened in a Brooklyn
family. A mother reproved her young son severely
for naughtiness. dwelling upon the fact that.
although neither she his father had seen him
do the act God had seen him. At the end OF
q very sad half hour with his mother the boy asked
permission to go walk. AS he started out his
little dog followed his heels. eager for attention.
The boy turned on the dog and said:
You go back home. It's bad enough to have
God watching all the time without you tagging
along"
1T seems to me that is very pathetic story"
said Mrs Hooper Untold mischief results from
the planting OF the idea of God sort of eternal
inspector in the child's mind 1t makes the child
feel that he have no identity of his own. 1t
makes him feel that God is occupied in watching
all the time what he does. That is one evil.
Another is that the child given entirely wrong
idea as TO why he should shu1 wrongdoing-that he
should shun It because he is sure to be seen and
found out The only true and right motive to give
him for stunning wrong is because it is wrong; the
evil results that flow from a wrong act should be
explained him Just far his intelligence will
take them in. And the childs intelligence will take
in great deal if the parent will have the patience
to explain
IDEAS OF DEATH.
Some on rsked what Ideas Mrs. Hooper would
give children of death. I'm the of very
young child" she said az would send him straight
away from the house In the case of a child old
enough to comprehend the matter at all, would
talk to him with perfect frankness not concealing
grief. but dwelling the happy side of death.
showing him how the grief was ours, but the
happiness ell his who gone believe in hav-
ing great many flowers, and having the funeral
made as cheerful and beautiful s possible Never.
children Erow up in any fear of death. 1 was
very much struck in seeing Everyman' to notice
the fear OF death that ran AL through the play.
think that is largely eliminated from our modern
NE think there IS no great fear OF death among
brought up IN atmosphere in which there was
not the slightest fear of DEATH and have never
Mrs. Hooper dweIt on the failure Of parents to
understand, or to try to understand. their chill
"A great deal Of harm is done by older members
she said. 1T leads children 10 repress their
they get the queerest distorted ideas from brooding
over things by themselves, without any sympathy
or explanation. Sometimes older brothers or sis
ters are worse about this than parents. l knew
Irritation. commanding his mother not to read his
personal letters to his older brothers and sisters.
He felt that he would not have the same sympathy
feel that his letters to his mother were confidential
Care should be taken not TO provoke feeling
OF dumb. helpless resentment on the part of the
than once when I opened little needle cushion
that had lain IN my workbasket for years son
Of mine, sixteen years old, was sitting beside me
The cushion was absolutely packed with needles.
!
and used get into trouble with you. and come
stick al the needles I could hnd clear into that
cushion, so you could not ind them. 1t was the
only way could get even
1t struck me with establishment 10 realize that
all those years. when he little fellow, had
been rousing such feelings OF silent resent rnent in
II knew a boy in another family who was ex-
tremey nervous and delicate. The doctor had
than necessary. and in conseqgenco he was Ger
taiLly rather spoiled and wiful His grandmother.
who visiting a the house disa Dproved OF con-
ditions very much She had brought up a large
fauily OF children, all OF them had turned out
sulendidly. ana perhaps she was not 10 be blamed
rate one day when he was doing something for-
hidden she took hold OF him and commanded him
You VIII stop that lmmedlately' said she Z
am stronger than you, and you cannot do that any
The boy stopped Immediately. but he looked up
you're stronger than God because He'll get even
with you
continued In charge OF him. I don't know This
boy IS now twelve years Old He has outsrown his
nice a boy one could ind.
WHAT CHILDREN MEAN
Parents not take time to interpret what chill
depreciation on their words and actions and 20 act
idea % f. and leave rambling sense
~ injustice behind Perhaps some OF you have
read the ch'lG's book called a Gentle Heritage
Y you viii rememler the excellent nurse who
would let the children talk about the 'bogie
MAN. NOW. This very good Tor CHILDREN
fEshten one ano' her and shamefully frightened
perstitlous. But one night little boy declared
~ he supper table that he had seen the 'bogie
INK The occasion clrcuustantially. The nurse tax