The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1904-02-13

work. Dropped Junior--Yes, they en-.
cored my sophomore year Princeton
Tiger.
Caller-Your sister is long time
making her appearance, Johnny. John
ny-Yes, she's got to make it, of
course, fore she comes down.-C Chicago
Tribune.
Ellis wife has been the making of
hin." why, he doesn't seem to be
much" That's 1t. She has made
him perfectly miserable p hiladel-
phia Bulletin.
Politician-Con Sarah,
I've been nominated. Sarah with de-
light)-Honestly? Politician What
difference does that make?-Detroit
Free Press.
The Mother-Bobbie, didn't your
conscience tell you that you had done
wrong? Bobbie-Yes'm; but 1 don't
believe everything hear.-Philadel-
phia Ledger.
"Do you know anything about fIirt-
ing?" "No," he replied sadly. 81
thought I did, but when tried it
hanged If the girl didn't marry me-
Chicago Post.
what can do for my little boy"
asked mamma, $50 that he won't want
to eat between meals" "Have the
meals ticker together" replied the
greedy young man.
| Farmer Ragweed-Has Bill learned
anything tew college? Mrs. Ragweed
No; an wuss'n that, he's forgot what
he ulster know! Says he can't eat pie
without fork.-Chicago News.
Doctor-Do I think can cure your
catarrh? Why, I'm sure of it. Patient
SO you are very familiar with the
disease? Doctor should say so! I've
had it myself all my life.-Judge.
Miss Muddie-I wish 1 knew Of a
really good way to preserve my COM
plexion. Miss Snappe-If you keep
the box in a cool place it will be all
right, won't tt?-Philadelphia Press.
Jonathan-I say, Britisher, can you
spell horse? Englishman - Orse?
Why, certainly. 1t honly takes hatch
anu q III GlAA a Ad4 anu uCSS anu q
he to spell 'orse.-Kansas City Jour
nal.
within the last decade" remarked
the progressive citizen, woman has
gained considerable standing in the
business world" eyes," rejoined the
female breadwinner, Especially in the
street cars"
Teacher-You notice that boy who
| stands at the foot Of the class? Well
last summer he was the brightest boy
| in school Committeeman-He Is now
1 notice the foot Of the class is nearest
the stove!
Mrs. Knox-So you met Mrs. Tom
Ign to-day. What did she say? Mr.
Knox-Nothing. Mrs. Knox-You sur
prise me-she usually talks an awful
lot! Mr.. Knox-Oh, she did that to
day, of course!
Missus-We're going to give dance
. on Friday, Jane, and want you to d.
: all you can to help us. Jane-Well
mum, I'm afraid 1 amt much good a
that sort of thing. only know a bar
rel organ Jig and a cake walk.
: Mrs. Ascum-Did you see Mrs. Lo
= cutie at the ball? Mr.. Ascum-Yes
Mrs. Ascum-She was dressed entirely
In white, the paper said. Is that SO
appear to be dressed entirely.-Phila
delphia Press.
"Seen Ezry's new horse?" asked on
citizen Of another. II have" was tn
reply. "Well, what does it look like?
asked the questioner, impatiently
"Well, he looks" said the other man
slowly, "as if Ezry had taken him 70
an old debit Christian Register.
who's the slowest man you eve
knew?" ga chap in New York. H.
fell out of a third-story fat window
and did not reach the ground for al
hour" "How was that?" He caugh
In tree at the second story and wen
: In to visit some friends. "-Detroi
Free Press.
? II don't believe in paying fame!
prices for custom-made Clothes" sal,
Kloseman. "Now here's a suit bough
ready made for seven dollars. If
were to tell you paid twenty dollar
for it, wouldn't you believe it?" Sc
might if you told me over the tele
.. phone. "-Philadelp Press.
.. Blobbs-What a touchy little cha
, Hotspur is-he's always ready to TAX
offense. Sharpe-I've known hin
= when he wouldn't. Blobbs-Whel
!. was that2 Sharpe-When we wer
: following the Atherstone hounds. He
always rather go half mile round
= 2 sooner than take a fence.
! zone week from to-day, Uncle Joh1
! will be married man. Yes, in seve
short days will be initiated into tn
mysteries of matrimony." "No mys
teries about it, my boy. 1t is just tn
!. plain, simple rule Of three" Rule G
: three? Eh-what three?" "Wif'