davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11

and you can sign it. 1t won't be
minute
Thanks. You are a wonder at saw
ing me trouble. jessie
'I always was. Father used to say
just the same thing. Ten pounds will
do for the present. Back in a mo-
ment.''
Twenty-four hours later than this
not uncommon domestic episode took
place, viz, at o'clock at night, Char
lie Spelthorne stood in the bedroom
of the fiat (the dressing room was
sacred to his wife) and cast fearful
eve around it while taking the precau-
ton Immediately afterward of turning
the key.
Then he opened a huge kit bag
and drew out a polichinelle costume.
white shoes, stockings and all, and
commenced to array his comely form
in them. Then he powdered his face,
went to his wife's dressing room, and,
obtaining some weird ungent. daobed
two round spots on his cheeks. and
next drew over his own fair curly hair
the clowns wig.
What good job it was he NUT
tered, as he went through the mys-
teries of this toilet, that Jessie went
out of town with Lady DHautenbas
to-day. Otherwise A1gy and Tor L,
at least-could never have gone to the
Chorus Girls ball. They say half
London, of sorts, will be there. We
ought to have a ripping old time.
hope Jessie won't ever hear of it,
though
Half an hour later his four-whe eeler
drew up at some chambers in Bury
street, and a tall gentleman, also en-
veloped in a long coat, but disguised
underneath as Henri ". Che didn't
look a bit like him), got into it. and
away they went to a well-known tav-
ern in the neighborhood of Cavendish
square, where a vast ballroom can be
hired for similar and other functions
There was sound of revelry by
night And bright the lamps shone
DER fair women and brave men byron
copyright has expired by "eff1ux of
time"-for this phrase vide the legal
reporters). Likewise the soothing
sound of the popping of festive cham
payne corks was to be heard, cigar
cite smoke perfumed the air. so did
Patchouli and Opoponax and other
things "On went the dance and joy
was uncorfined-" The floors shock
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11

That Mrs. Spelthorne was a deter
mined young woman everybody knew,
and her husband knew it best of all.
as it was quite right he should. Yet,
because he loved her, he was always
ready to make excuses for her to those
who had any right to listen to them.
You see" he would say, -she was
an only child and motherless, and ran
wild about her fathers place while he
was at his business all day. Then,
later, she was constituted the mistress
of his house, and ruled it with great
firmness She was also considered
pretty by many people, consider her
so myself, although 1 am her husband
and she had other offers before
mine"
Dear, dear, the listener said.
"Quite so, that has always been my
view of it. There was one-its truly
dreadful to narrate-who was a clerk
to a brewer in the neighborhood; then
there was doctors assistant
Good heavens!"
Then there was a curate"@
This is awful
"And a host of others. But, all the
same, she was reserved for me, and l
have got her; and if she is wilful,
she is winsome, and l love her. OH
do"
Now, Mrs. Spelthorne and her hus-
band really did dwell in a very pleas
ant state of connubial amity-in spite
of the revelations Mr.. Spelthorne had
just seen fit to make to his cousin
(irst) home from India-owing partly
to the fact that they suited each other,
and also did not interfere with each
others habits and customs, while, as
becomes a modern model couple, each
went their own way without bother
ing the other. Spelthorne of course,
had a club or so-what self-respecting
husband hasn't?-and a club covereth
a multitude of things. So, also, had
Mrs. Spelthorne the Advanced
Women's" it was ca1led-and here it
was her habit to regale some of her
friends whom. as she used to say,
Charlie did not like, because he was
SO funny"
All the same, the Spelthorne me-
mage ran well and smoothly. Charlie
went to the city and played at being a
stock broker. and Jessie sat in her fiat
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11
A SEVEN WIFE RELIGION.
Fanatic Fails in Attempt to Introduce
1t Into Russia.

Fanatic Fails in Attempt to Introduce
1t Into Russia.
A Doukhobor named Vazoff, who
was disappointed with the doings of
his fanatica1 sect in Canada, and re-
turned to Russia, has just been ar
rested and sent to prison, wires the
Moscow correspondent of the London
Express. Vazoff aspired to be the
Joseph Smith of Russian Mormonism.
Having quarreled with the Canadian
Doukhobors, he returned surreptitious-
ly to his native country, boasting that
he would found a sect ten times as
numerous as theirs. Arriving at Odes-
sa he tramped inland, announcing to
the peasants new revelation, accord
ing to which all true Christians were
in future to have seven wives, "aS
was the case with good Canadians" 4"
The villagers of Ilovo passed a resolu-
ton accepting Vazoff's doctrines, but
when the mayor, his two sons, and
seven or eight rich peasants put the
tenets of the new religion into prac-
tice there was a loud outcry, and the
young men of the district raided the
mayors house and nearly killed his
sons. Vazoff fed, but was pursued
to neighboring village. where he was
captured while haranguing the mou-
jfks on the virtues of polygamy.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11
TOO MUCH FOR MADDOX.
Southerner Yielded to Pleading oi
Representative PAYNE.

Representative fayne.
1t deeply grieved Serene E. Payne,
the Republican floor leader, when Mr..
Maddox of Georgia raised the point
of no quorum and thus threatened to
prevent the house from passing a lot
OF bills With heavy sigh Mr.. Payne
arose, steered his portly form across
to the Democratic side, and looked
down on Mr.. Maddox with a panied
look.
Maddox" said Payne in a seductive
tone, why do you ball things up this
way just as we are getting along so
nicely? You have some secret reason
Maddox. Tell me what it is?"
"Mr. Payne" began Maddox with
dignity.
"Confidentially." said Mr.. Payne in
a wheedling voice. 'I won't breathe
1t to a SOUL
"As 1 was about to say, Mr.. Paynes
resumed Mr.. Maddox.
Just among us girls" pleaded Mr.
Payne.
The grizzled, lean, bald-headed old
Confederate looked up at the large
form and white head above him, and
gasped a couple of times. Then he
arose.
'tMr. Speaker" said Mr.. Maddox, 81
withdraw the point"
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11

beneath the cOncuSSion OF hundreds OF
feet, and Suddenly, in the middle of it
all. Charlie reeled heavily against his
friend Algy Smith, and exclaimed,
1--we had a vision
Better have a drink, old man.
What's the vision, all the same?"
You know this Lady D'Hautenbas
by sight don't Tell me, implore
does she squint?"
Like fiend- Welli"
Look at that woman in the black
mask, close by. Weighs about sixteen
stone, dressed as Juliet. Oh! do look.
Algy."
Il am looking. It's about the bulk.
She's fine figure of woman. But
the eyes, especially the left one. don't
look just like hers"
1.-THE wall paper! The wall paper!"
Charlie moaned. "The writing on the
WALL mean the wall paper!"
This won't do, old boy" Algy ex-
claimed. What did you have to drink
at dinner?" But before he could re-
ceive an answer to this dietary ques-
ton an awful thing occurred
The chandelier-probably jumped
out of it's fastening by the herculean
efforts of the dancers-fe1l to the floor
with crash, and in doing so ignited
the dresses of some of the dancers,
especially those of the ladies. And
one of these latter, dressed as La Pom
padour, appeared now to be in pretty
bad case, since she seemed well alight
in a moment.
But Charlie was always a hero, and
he proved himself one at this time
While other men nervousiy stood still
he snatched the cloak off his Henri w.
friends shoulders, rushed at the burn
ing lady, threw her down on the floor,
fell alongside of her, extinguished the
flames, and, amid roar of applause
from the company, got her, unharn, ed
and untouched by the flames, to her
feet.
But as she staggered up her mask
fell off, and Charlie also staggefed
back, gasping and mumbling.
You traitressi" he said "Yo,r-
you-choosing the wall paper, indeed ,
I knew it."
you wretch! What about your old
Podophyllin Il mean Taraxacum-
Gold Mines. I'll have a divorce"
But all the same she didn't, because
you see, this was a case of sauce for
the goose or "tit for tat or @'Ruse
contre Ruse," or whatever it pleases
You to call 1.-THE King.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11
PYeMlEs OF CENTRAL AFRICA.
Remarkable Race of savages Told Of
by Travellers.

The pygmies OF Central Africa
really exist, though many people, in
spite of recent discoveries, still be-
ieve that these dwarfs only live in
the land of fable. Their home is in
village called Ndombe. They num-
ber about five thousand and inhabit
huts like beehives with an entrance
at the bottom. Curious1y enough, their
king is not a dwarf, but a giant, meas
uring six feet six inches in height and
with a proportionate breadth. The
pygmies live entirely by hunting. for
which they use a bow and poisoned
arrows. Mr.. Samuel Werner, who
probably knows more about them than
any one else, speaks of their surpris-
ing skill with their weapons, having
seen one shoot running rat at a
distance of twenty yards They are
so strong and active that fifty miles
is an average days march for them,
and their senses are so keen that they
can compete with their own dogs in
this respect.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11
Very Curious Ring.

A Quaker City society maiden is
very proud of ring the like of which
is probably not to be found in this
country. 1t descended to her from her
grandmother, and was the workman
ship of a famous Partisan jeweler.
AS worn it forms a fourfold coil
around the finger of it's fair owner.
terminating in the usual serpent head,
set with wicked-looking emerald. 1t
is, however, provided with an infini-
tesima1 number of tiny joints. invis-
ible except upon the very closest ex-
animation, but permitting the snake
to be drawn out in a spiral several
inches long. Although it has been in
the family over fifty years, these deli
cate springs have not once been out
of order, luckily, since it would re-
quire extraordinary skill to repair and
make them as good as when fresh
from the hands of the clever French
art jeweler. Both for its value and as
a curiosity the ring has been very
carefully handled and treasured.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11

Shouldn't go If she did, Charlie
said. Very busy myself. Great Tar
axacum Gold Mines being f1oated.
Late night in city. Go and enjoy your
self. God bless you'll"
Dear old Charlie. OH by the by,
give me some money, will you?"
Il can't. Check book is in the city"
Il know But 1 tore two or three
out the other day, SO as to always
have them in the fiat If wanted. I'll
just go and fill one up while you are
smoking your after dinner cigarette,
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11

plest style of architecture, and no
where in it was there a place to hang
a bell. A bell has conscience-awaken-
ing qualities in places not so thickly
settled or so given to late hours that
it's effects are not altogether as moral
as might be desired, and a nearby
tree solved the bell-tower problem.
The bell was hung to one of it's lower
branches, where it swings free when
rung, and the rope is tied to the trunk
to keep it quiet when not in use. The
mission is in Windhut, the chief city
OF this part of Africa and the seat of
the governor. The fact that bell
hung in the open in this manner is
left alone speaks well for the German
South African small boys.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11
Fuet without Smoke.

A French naval officer has made It
possible, with certain changes in the
f1reboxes, to burn a fuel in tie form
of petroleum briquettes, which give
on no smoke. The officer claims his
invention will give fuel of which one
pound is equivalent to four pounds of
coal The briquettes are made by
adding to petroleum oil, for each liter,
$50 grammes of ground soap, $50
grammes of resin. and 300 grammes
of caustic soda 1ye. This mixture is
first heated and stirred until near
solidifcation, when it is poured into
mouids, which in turn are then placed
in an oven for ten or fifteen minutes,
and the briquettes are ready for use
after cooling q few hours. Greater
so1idity may be obtained by the addi-
ton OF a small quantity of sawdust
and a little clay or sand.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11
Whence Came "Humbuou7

The word "humbug" has been
traced back to the title-page of esThe
Universal Jester, being a collection
of merry conceits. bon-mots and hum
bugs, by Ferdinando Killigrew, Lon
don, 1735-4O."
The following are the most plausi-
bic and possible derivations:
In the time of James ii a worthless
coin was mintec at Dublin from a
soft, mixed metal, which became
known as Uim bog, pronounced Oom-
bug, l. e., soft copper, worthless
money.
Others refer it to hum, in the sense
of hoax, and bug, in the old sense of
bugbear-
Others say it is merely hum buzz
used in combination to signify sound
without sense. Others, again, think
that it was first applied to Homberg,
a chemist and an ardent seeker of
the PHILOSOPHERS stone.-Stray
Stories.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11
DEATH MASK OF CROMWELL.
One Of Four Casts Made Is Now a
Harvard University.

One Of Four Casts Made Is Now at
Harvard University.
Cromwell's death mask, which so
appropriately rounds out the Cromwell
part of the Harvard Carlyle collection,
hung for many years in the English
writer's home in Chelsea and was then
given by him to his friend and CORE
spondent, Prof. Charles Eliot Norton
Of Cambridge. The cast had been pre-
sented to Carlyle by the sculptor
Thomas Woolner; the present posses
sor of the original death mask, and is
one of the few casts ever taken from
the original mask. When Carly1e's
bequest came to Harvard Prof. Nor
ton presented the cast to the Harvard
College library, and the Harvard Ii
brary thus became possessed of the
fourth cast taken from the original
mask, the other three being respec-
lively at the Universities of Oxford
and Cambridge and in the British Mu-
scum. Carlyle considered it undoubt-
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11

telling the cook of her past life and
experiences, and talking about her
fathers place in Sussex, till it was
time to so to the Advanced wom-
ems" But. one night, when Charlie
came home to dinner, which he did
y-sometlmes-his wife said.
Lady D'Hautenbas wants me to go
down to her little place at Molesey
tomorrow to help her to choose the
new wall paper We shall be quite
alone, and just dine there. sleep there.
and come back early next morning.
So she Is not asking vou"-
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11
sona of the Office Seeker.

hand has been squeezed to pulp:
I've forced down so many Scotch high
balls that am too crowded to gulp
My eyes in their sockets are burning: my
hair needs a comb and a brush
My feet are as wet as a dishrag from
tramping around in the slush
But still am warbling my matin-it acts
wonderful sa1ye.
Say, what are you going to have. boys?
What are you going to have?
My throat is infiamed from much smok-
Ny temper and patience I'm losing. but
still I meek as a lamb.
My rival is out with his hammer. recit-
ing the breaks L have made
The fondness l have for red liquor, the
bills that I never have paid.
But bark to the song 1 am singing; in
sooth, tbs a fine brand of saIve;
Say. what are you going to have boys?
What are you going to have?''
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11
Mouse Jumped Down His Throat.

A singular misadventure recently
occurred to a young man named Ar
thur Pilgrim of Leighton, Buzzard.
Pilgrim was engaged in delivering a
number Of boxes. AS he was in the
act OF lifting one of these boxes he
heaved a deep breath, and while SO
doing mouse jumped from the box
right down his throat For time the
man suffered from a terrible choking
sensation, and he could hardly see. He
drove to a doctors surgery, where a
strong emetic was given to him, but
without effect. For several hours the
man suffered considerable discomfort,
but he Is now well again.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11
Remarry After Long Separation

Capt and Mrs. c.. G.. Thompson of
Arkansas City were first married more
than fifty years ago. After twenty -fv :
years they were divorced, the wife al
leging desertion. In the twenty-five
years which followed Mrs. Thompson
was married twice and buried both
husbands, and Capt Thompson was
married once and divorced. Recently
the pair came together by chance. A
reconciliation was fixed up and their
marriage followed.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11
onIv Two oId-Timers Left.

1t is curious fact that out of a
long list of merchants who were do
ing business in Brunswick, Me-, fifty
years ago none are living now except
A. v. Metcalf and Ira p. Booker, who
at that time were in partnership. The
latter is now the treasurer of Bow
duiu college
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11
Musical Wood.

The harmonica used by the natives
of Tobo, Sumatra, is composed of
hardwood sticks suspended from two
separated supports. The different
sized sticks, concave above and be-
low, give forth shril1 tones when
struck with wooden rod.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11
A NOVEL BELL TOWER.
Picturesque Features of Church |
German South Africa.

Church authorities, like private in
dividuals, have to make the best of
circumstances, and the most pictur-
esque feature of little mission
church in German South Africa is it's
bell tower. The chapel is of the SIM
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11

fresh water wells and springs are situ-
ated within few feet of the ocean,
but, strange to say, the salty taste of
the sea cannot be detected. The
women of Cebu take the water to
their homes in long bamboo vessels,
and in this picture are shown some
Visayan women getting their days
supply.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11
This Was once the Mode.

This was a fashionable full dress
for evening in the year 1909. In those
days, wonder, were girls worried in
their sleep by dreaming that they
found themselves in their night gar
ments out in the cold world alone
Everyone seems to have this ridicu-
lous dream from which she wakes
up in a fright; but don't think such
a dream would have frightened that
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11

Numerous Varieties Of Cactus.
George b. Orcutt of Rockland, Me-,
has an interesting snapshot of Cali
yornia park. showing 130 varieties OF
cactus.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11
Fresh Water Beside ocean.

Along the coast of the island of
Cebu. in the Philippines, most of the
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1904-06-11

The Lords prayer, printed in Bur-
ma, looks like this. When they re-
peat it aloud it sounds much as it
looks here.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1904-01-20
Local inspectors for H,lo.

The visiting local board of inspectors
of steam boilers and hulls left for Hilo
yesterday. They expect to return here
on Sunday, and during their absence
will also have inspected vessels at Ka-
hului. They have an Office in rooms
800 and 80 StangenwaId building.
Sailing vessels with American registers
and the local vessels in port are being
spruced up a little preparatory to the
The tug Rover, belonging
to the Pacific Oil Transportation Com
pany, has been brought in from the
stream and moored at Hackfeld wharf.
She has been repaired. thoroughly ov-
erhauled, and pointed within and with
out so that she now presents very
neat appearance.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1904-01-20
Many stowaways From Here.

Among steamship men Honolulu IS
getting about as bad a reputation for
as some of the towns along
the Suez Canal, a place where. every
vessel that passes is infested with mis-
cradle people who are anxious to get
to any other portion of the world than
around Suez. Hardly a vessel leaves
Honolulu that does not carry a stow
ayay or two. The Alameda has two
watchmen at each gangway prior to
sailing fromtthis port but despite tlis
fact stowaways get aboard. On the last
trip from Honolulu a sailor slowed
away here and showed up after the yes
sci had been a day at sea.
How did you get aboard?" asked an
officer of him.
"I carried a saloon passengers bag
gage up the gangway for him." said
the sailor, and 1 did not go back 20
the wharf again
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1904-01-20
TAKEN OFF A
SINKING SHIP

On board the five-masted schooner W.
H Marston, Captain Curtis, is a man
who has spent nearly all of the past
thirteen years as carpenter on board
ships commanded by the Marston's
skipper He is working as carpenter
of the schooner at present and only re-
saloon of the vessel. It is not strange
that this carpenter, whose name is John
Holson, should stay SO long under Cap
tain Curtis, for the latter once saved
the life of Holson and twenty-one other
persons during a very heavy gale off
Cape Horn. On September "a, 1890. Cap
tain Curtis, in command of the Ameri-
can ship Belle of Bath en- route from
Portland, Oregon, to Havre, France,
sighted the ship Charles Dennis off
Cape Horn. The Charles Dennis was
very low in the water and was show
ing signals of distress. AT this time a
tremendous gale was blowing. 1t SEEM
ed that a boat could not live for a mo-
ment but Captain Curtis launched one
and after hard work succeeded in rescu.
ing the crew. The Dennis was sinking
and it was probable that all of the
twenty-five persons would have perish
ed had not the Belle of Bath hove in
sight in time to rescue them. Captain
Curtis landed the rescued people, ex-
cept Hols6n, at Rio Janeiro. but Holson
wished to stay by his rescuer and ship
ped in Rio Janeiro to continue on the
voyage to France. Captain Curtis was
given a medal in recognition of this
life-saving feat.