davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

= admit that I hit the plaintiff
said Subbubs. and I'd do it again
if
Come Comet interrupted the
magistrate, DON'T tax that way"
Judge, / was down IN M. cellar
last night trying to coax the furnace
TO give out some heat. In the midst
OF my work the ben rang and I had
to answer IT. When I opened the door
this man stepped IN and tried to sell
me a patent Gre extinguisherl
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30
Lacked Originality.

He latter the engagement And
am / really and truly the only man
YOU ever kissed?
She-Why. Of course you are. you
dear old lump Of stupidity.
He-Why DO you call me that?
She-Because you are not original
At least a dozen men have asked me
the very same question
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30
SIZING Hin Up.

Very well, you may make a suit
for me-" said SlOpay. but how long
VIII il take you?"
About a week." replied the tailor
Positively? A friend of mine who
recommended me here told me you
seldom delivered suits on time
He was right. We only deliver
them c. O. d.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

A Philadelphia society girl actress
has gone to work as a cook There
are a battalion Of other society girl
actresses who, If they can't cook at
all, can at least cook as well as they
can act
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

Montreal Nov 15.-Haior AlIis5n
Edwards, United States Consul Ges-
sral Who returned today. from q Tsslt
to his home st Fargo. North Dakote,
said IN an interview. Tbs Rrcper
way to describe the manner IN Waich
the people you are getting are the
Ing over into Western Canada iz 70
say they are coming over In droTes.
Among the people there did not seen
70 be any thought Of there being
boundary line at al. L Is simply s
question, added the major. of there
not being any more land IN North
Dakota and the surrounding States.
and the people are locking to Canada
to set good farms Naturally the
number that VIII come over Erfll IL
crease al the tine, and may szy
the people Of North Dakota are CON
best people in the west They are
vel supplied with money and are
well acquainted with the conditions
under which they VIII have 70 work.
The agents OF the Canadian Govern
ment are prepared to give the fullest
information regarding homestead and
other lands.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

Flyieigh had hard luck with his air.
ship
How was that2r
ct rev away
Built to hy, wasn't it2
yes. bit Il wasn't built 20 Ey into
the barnyard Of q farmer Who made
him pay half the thing was worth be
fore he'd give II mp
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

There were $1,000 divorces in the
United States last year, or an aTerags
Of nearly seven for every hour OF the
day and night Sundays Included The
business Of making and unmaking mis-
st Marriages appeares to have become
3 great national industry.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

The beauty editor Of the Chicago
RecOrd-Herald says a mother should
always encourage her daughter to con-
suit the mirror frequently. Most
mothers wiz not find that this duty
makes life unduly strenuous.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

The letters Of Queen Victoria are
to be published, after being edited BY
friends Of the royal family. We
have no doubt that it viii be quite
safe to place the book in the hands
Of young girls.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

A Pennsylvania COW licked up the
contents Of a two gallon can OF green
paint the other day and to the delight
Of her owner lived She was probably
trying TO color her interior in accord
anee with the modern freak idea Of
animal painting
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30
THE PERuNA ALMANAC
IN soo0Oo6 tfCsfEe

The 1-eruna Lucky Day Almsnac
has become q fixture In over eizEz
million homes It can Be obtained
from al druggists free. Be sure -
inquire early. The 1905 Almanac =
already published. aad the supply Flll
sooa Be exhausted Do not put = c.
Get one today.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

John ". Gates was in an autOmc-
bile accident in New York the other
day. The car upset and the chauffeur
was seriously hurt. Nothing hap
pened to Gates. Nothing ever does.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

When q child with one twisted foot
is thankful the other is straight, the
grouchy pessimist should tTy to es-
cape from himself.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

This sudden thrusting OF the
zemstyos into public notice is caus-
ing a great many busy people to drop
everything and run to their cyclope
dias.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

Bulletin No. /" OF the National
Mosquito determination Society has
just been issued Evidently the socie-
" believes it wiz be necessary to
work overtime If the mosquitoes are
ever to be exterminated.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

A scientist says that pumpkin pie
is filed with microbes. That is better
than having the microbes filed with
pumpkin pie, for there wouldn't be
any left for the rest Of Us.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

Every mail brings Nan Patterson
offers " marriage" And still there
are people who affected not to believe
in Max NOrdau's theory Of degenera-
alton
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

Bow legged men, as usual wiz be
the first to adopt next seasons skin
tight trousers.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

The people Of New York might pay
OF their public debt by holding court
IN Madison Square Garden and charg-
ing admission the next time a chorus
girl is tried for murder.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

A run on a Cleveland bank vas stop
ped the other day by the arrival Of
an automobile at the bank loaded
with money for the depOsitors, Under
such circumstances the driver might
be excused for violating the speed
limit.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

From the revelations in the matter
of the failure Of a ''wOmen's broker"
IT would seem that the sucker that is
born every minute has a dear little
twin sister
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

That Pennsylvania man who mar
Tied a widow after pIatOnic friend
ship Of twenty-five years must now ad-
nit that the elder Weller was right
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30
AK Your Druggist Tor Aliens Foot-Eass.

81 tried ALIENS FOOT-EASE rscs.s-
y, and have just bought another supply Z
has cured my corns, and the hot. ourrsz,z
and itching sensation IN ny feet which v-sr
almost unbearable, and would not be with
out Il nOw.-AGrs ". J. Walker. Csudaz
q. - Sold By al Drszggists, sc.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

The football season is ended for
this year. Now If they viii please
quit raising the price Of meat good
cheer may be expected to prevail.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

A slim attendance is reported for
the New York horse show The
women couldn't have been a very at
tractiYe lot this time
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

at a recent Chicago wedding enc OF
the uusical features was the EhfzliBg
- an expert Of Oh Promise Me- as
q substitute for the wedding march.
Why didn't they nave the bTi6s cone
Gown the aisle HElstiiDE I'D Leave
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30
o. the Funny Mani

Klumsey-It always worries me to
90 into a china store I'm always
afraid Of breaking something.
JOkeley-Me, too went into one
the other day TO buy a wedding pres
ent and broke something worth $50.
Klumsey-You don't say 50? What
vas it2
Jokeley-A twenty-dOllar note
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

The French sardine crop is a fail
ure this year. No matter. 1t viii
cost no more to put a French label
on the Maine sardines.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

The minister who thought he would
be more useful If he tasted forty
days has now no utility at all He is
dead
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

Cupid, after seeing the average
married couple safely through the
honeymoon, goes on on a long vaca-
ton
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

Those Turkish troops that are de-
handing their pay must seem TO the
sultan to be sadly lacking in patriot
ism.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

Nine Emma Eames is said to be as
"cOldly lovely as ever. The descrip-
ton somehow reminds one Of ice
cream.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

Paul Kruger left a fortune Of nearly
$4,000, 900. John Bull must admit now
that the war in South Africa was in
a sense a failure.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

Farmer Hornihand-I nOtust in tn
paper that a woman at Chicago tells
how [ dress on SOS, 900 a year.
Mrs HOrnihand-Law sakesi What
could any woman want with q. 900 cal
leo wrappers in one year2
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

The Philadelphia W0man-.sHave
you ever been disappointed II love
The Chicago WOman-.No, I've al
ways married for money"
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

A New York policeman madTertent-
y arrested his wife for drunkenness.
Trouble brewing
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

Andrew Carnegie is a sufferer from
1umbago. Has he ever tried a poor
mans plaster for It?
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

Wigg-"Harduppe is 8 chronic Dor
rover. isn't hep Wagg-@Yes; but
don't say anything. Hes awfuliy
touchy about It."
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

The standing army Of the Panama
republic has been reduced to twenty
five men-a1 generals, Of course
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

That American heiress who refused
to pay $4,000 for a count may have
reasoned that this was an oYercharge
Of SIS, 1870.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

Wife-John. is there any poison in
the house? Husband-Yes. But why
do you ask Wife, want TO sprinkle
some on this angel cake and put il
where the mice viii get it. Wouldn't
that kill them? Husband-Sure; but it
isn't necessary to waste the poison
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

The ven earned reputation and fnercs-
Ing popularity Of the Lewis E
maintained high quality a1d appreciate
q the smoker Lewis Factory t5orlai -
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

Suppose 1 were to tell you you must
not so 10 the matinee today" said Ar.
Naggit How would you like that,
"O!" ambiguOusly replied his young
wife, with a steely glitter in her eye
q wouldn't mind"
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

Adam blamed & al on Eve. but eFeT
since she has been blaming her bcg 8
on some other Ewes boy.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

The man who drinks IS sure % nze7-
- woman with delicate sense 81
smell
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

Al Eirl always has wi eBols
laugh - somebodg slse's. sDsclz-ft
SIZE Eoz1st understand f.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30
Real Nerve

Blinkers-Could you lend me your
racing auto fer the afternoon. old
chap
r-Why-er-yes.
Blinkers-Thanks awfully And say
-er-could you lend me the price Of
a couple Of fines or so2-Puck-
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

He had just proposed, but his pov-
erty vas too much q a handicap
"a nan without money she said
might as ven walk back and sic
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30
Philosophy.

The Rejected One-Jilted, Tilted, Tor
4 blOke wiz a penny cigar.
The Cynic-Wimmin, me dear Al
gernon, are all alike.-Half Holiday.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

20. Of course. he resoined. s'He M
turaIly souldn't be "a position 70
ride back
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

She-I think a girl is very foolish TO
marry a poor man.
He-yes. but not half 50 foolish az
the poor man who marries that kind OF
q girl.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

Nurse-Little boy you must not DO
that Il is not nice 70 kiss little girls
Street Kid-WeIi, dat just shows
what you know about de kissin' game.
Philadelphia Telegraph.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

immigration Feom naissts snd Aslei1-
Ing stztes-ssslor Ecsgards. uulle1
States consul General At doatreai.s
Describes ths Movement a. Dae tc
Scarcity q land.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

teacher?"
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1904-12-30

Who, then?"
"a claim sdjuster."
The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1904-10-15
Stocks and Bonds.

New York Oct 13.-The activity o.
the stock market reached the boilin
point today and trading took on tn
appearance of the great markets
a few years ago. 1t is highly probabls
that the sources of the buying have
widened with the recent violent ad
vances in the market and some OUTSIDE
participation may be thus represented
The combined strength and specia
prominence of Peoples Gas anC
Brooklyn Transit served to recall pre-
ViouS campaigns in these and other
stocks which We're favorites of tht
late Ex-Governor Flower. The con
viction was very general also that {
veteran operator and turfman, who
has long refrained from dealings was
again conducting transactions on a
large scale by very characteristic
methods. The movement carried al,
before it from whatever sources it
came or for whatever motives. The
list of separate issues dealt in was
longer than at any time this year. Be-
fore the day was over practically ali
important stocks had moved forward
a point or more. There wee one or
two slight pauses in the activity CT
the market during the day. but it was
only when prices fell back slightly ag-
gressive buying on each occasion re-
awakened the animation of the mar
ket ana carried it to new high levels.
until the final dealings. when free
realizing mingled with the new adj
Vances and made the closing irregular.
Gains of / to 2 IL points are gener-
al throughout the list and are much
larger in special cases in the railroad
and industrial list.
Bonds were active and firm. Total
safes (par valued $7.S45, 900
e. S. bonds were unchanged on call.
Total sales stocks today were l.
$50, 90 shares. including Atchison "a
so: Baltimore and Ohio 81. 800: Chesa-
peake and Ohio 1900; Chicago Great
western 10: Colorado Southern 5000:
Erie $4,000: Louisville and Nashville
~ 200; Metropolitan Securities 14.200:
Metropolitan Railway 22.300; Missouri
Pacific 10000: New York Central TO-
900: Norfolk and Western $500.
PENNSYLVANIA 1880: Reading $500:
Rock Island 64,200S Rock Island pre-
The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1904-10-15
Ware a. Aeiand'S
Cotton Letter.

Raleigh, n. c., Oct. 1.-THE mar
ket has had quite an advance as We'll
as a decline this week. After touch
ing loo for December, during the lat
Ter part of last week a sharp reaction
followed during which December ran
up to about 1895. Without any change
in the situation, or a reason for the
break, the market broke away until
December sold yesterday at 10c., the
same figures reached a week ago.
From this it will be seen that the mar
ket has made very little if any pro-
gress as a result of the weeks bust
ness Sentiment at times been very
much confused, as the South has re-
fused to let go of cotton on a de-
cline. and spinners do not appear as
yoracious buyers on any advance over
10 1-4c. The underlying factors in
the cotton situation. which became
evident last week, namely. that the
Southern cotton grower has MS own
ideas of value of cotton. and thus far
neither the spinner nor the Specula-
tor has been able to convince MIN
that his ideas are altogether wrong.
have been intensified during the week,
and have attained more general recog-
milton. AS evidences of this the move
ment has fallen off below last week S
figures and report from all sections
of the South show that cotton is dltf1-
cult TO buy at concessions in price. IN
der these circumstances. it is not UNI
reasonable to ask the causes for the
exceedingly irregular price move
ments taking place this week. Any
one familiar with speculation knows
that a very small thing will influence
the market for the time being, en-
tirely irrespective of underlying fac
tors. This has been the case this
week. Things were very quiet on
Wednesday with January selling
around 10 lac. when rather large
trader recently returned from Europe
bought about $4,000 bales Of cotton.
AS the trader in question is known
to take small losses on the wrong side
of the market everybody turned to
and sold cotton for a decline. There
was a general feeling that a break OF
20 or 80 points would bring out cotton
ana traders believed that a little lu-
dicious headWork could bring about d
break of this extent. There was so
much unanimity of sentiment over
this prospect that it was not difficult
in a narrow market 10 bring about
the break AS far as the market goes
there is no additional light on the DO
sition to warrant any change in the
belief that for a while at least cotton
at 10 cents in New York is very rea-
sonable. Buyers on declines around
this figure are likely to make money
as long as the Southern holder con-
tinues mistaken in his views of prices.
WARE - LELAND.
Gowan's Pneumonia Cure will pre-
vent diptheria.
The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1904-10-15
Hcster's Cotton Statement.
(By the Associated Press


New Orleans, Oct 14.-Secretary
Testers weekly cotton statement, is
sued today, shows for the fourteen
days of October an increase over last
year of 276,000 and an increase over
the same period year before last of
$4,000 For the Al days of the sea-
son that have elapsed the aggregate
S ahead of the same days of last year
68S, 900, and ahead of the same days
year before last $4,000. The amount
brought into sight during the past
week has been 524,659 bales against
691,5 SIS for the same seven DAYS last
year; 446,340 year before last. The
movement since September L shows re-
1eipts at all United States ports to
nave been 1.S65.776. against 1,147,045
last year. Overland. across the Mis-
Sissippi Ohio and Potomac rivers to
Northern mills and Canada 39426,
against 1887 last year. Interior
stocks in excess of those held at the
close of the commercial year PA
against 1866 last year: Southern
mills takings $4,000. against 223,570
asst year. The total movement since
september /, is 2,416,518. against l.,
)2S,26S last year. Foreign exports foc
The week have been 254,177. against
210,272 last year, making the total
thus far for the season 1,227581,
against 675, 1892 last year. The total
,akings of American mills. North
south and Canada thus far for the
season have been 477856, against 426,
$50 last year. Stocks at the seaboard
md 20 leading Southern interior CEN
ters have increased during the week
i72,955 bales, against an increase dur
ng the corresponding period last sea-
son of S5,77S. Including stocks left
over at ports and interior towns from
the last crop and the number of bales
brought into sight thus far from the
new crop. the supply to date is 2.57S,-
1876. against 1.695,067 for the same pc
"iod last year.
The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1904-10-15
]. D. BOUSHALL, Gen. Agent
Tucker Building Opposite Office. Raleigh N.

ferred $500; st. Louis Southwestern
preferred 10,100; Southern Pacific 49,
so; Southern Railway 1900: South
ern Railway preferred 1.400; Texas
and Pacific 6.100; Union Pacific So
500; Mexican Central $500: Copper
$4,000; American Car and Foundry
800: American Ice preferred 10000;
Locomotive 1890: American Smelling
9,100: American Sugar 4S,400: Brook
yn Transit $4,000; Colorado Fuel s.
400; Corn Products 1900 Interna-
tional Paper $500; National Lead O.
400; Pacific Mail $500; Peoples Gas
49,100; Pressed Steel Car 10000; Ten
nessee Coal 1900; u. S. Leather TO-
200: L. S. Steel 119.500: u. S. Steel
preferred 124.S00.
The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1904-10-15

!! YER TWO CENTS
ON THE bUSHEL
Lack of Wheat Suitable
for Grinding.
THIS THE MAIN CAUSE
Big Shortage in French Crop Adds to
the Buoyancy. The Stock Market
6oils With Activity, All Lead
ing Securities Moving
Higher.
Higher.
(By the Associated Press.)

New York. Oct. 14.-After early
steadinesS the cotton market today
weakened under liquidation and bear
pressure following disappointing re-
ports from the Southern spot mar
ketS and at the close was barely
nights closings level. The market
opened steady at an advance of to
points on moderate covering. This
was a little better than due on the
cables. But frost was reported from
Denver and this seemed to render
smaller shorts cautious about staying
in the market over Sunday and follow
ing the call prices worked UP about
s to 10 points net higher. Advices
from the South as to the spot situa :
ton showed easineSs and prices here
sold off quite sharply from the best
with January going Gown from 1914
to loo. New Orleans which had ruled
steady during the morning. turned
easier. sending selling orders to the
local market and there seemed to be
considerable pressure from bearisl
sources while it was said that recent
'ly acquired lines of long cotton were
being liauidated. Toward the close
the market recovered or 5 points
from the lowest but was finally barely
steady at decline of points to an
advance of one point.
Sales were estimated at 100000
bales.
Receipts at the ports today 10000
bales. against 54,S33 last week and
51,176 last year. For the week 1885,
600 bales, against 397,S69 last week
and 299, $40 last year. Todays receipts
at New Orleans 15,429 bales. against
1924 last year and at Houston o.
1913 bales. against 11.752 last year.
New York. Oct. H--Cotton spot steady 3,
points lower. middling uplandS 1913
middling gulf 1861, sales LOO 52S bales.
Futures opened and closed steady
Open High Low Close