The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-06-26
MANY GENERALS"
IN POSTOFFICE
How Custom of Giving
Titles Has Grown.
THE MEN DON'T LIKE 1T
visitor Comments Satirically Upon
Practice Of BestOwing These
Meaningless EpithetS.

have been away from Washington
a number OF years. said a man Who
has had a good deal 20 do with The
Postoftice Department in his day "aud 7
find number Of changes In the official
life OF the city The most striking OF
these. however. IS the number Of rifles
that have grown up in the Postofice
Department since / was last there.
Whenever 1 go over there and talk 10
the officials. TIE majority of whom have
either been appointed from the outside
or promoted 10 good offices since 1 left,
I am struck with the use Of the term
General as applied TO nearly every man
IN the building whose position IS above
that Of a division chief, and I can
scarcely suppress a smile when 1 hear
them talking about General this one
and General that one.
1t reminds me Of the use Of Col
onef in Kentucky. and also Of the in
crease In the number Of officers Of beth
armies since the close of the civil war.
Nowadays one hears men called Cen
eraI and Colonel who were privates
in the civil war. That is bad enough.
but 70 find ten or twelve Generals in
the POstOfice Department who have
never smelt gunpowder strikes my funny
streak every time I hear It.
Bad Fit for Wynne.
Bob wynne IS an old friend of mine
and could scarcely suppress a grin
when, yielding TO custom, I called him
General the other day
Oh. drop that, John said the first
assistant I am the only man in the
department who is not a general. Call
me Bob" when you want 70 and Mr..
Wynne' when you are introducing me
10 your friends, but cut the General
out
That pleased me- for had been talk
ing to the postofice employees and heard
them speak OF General Payne Cen
eral Wynne General Madden Cen
eral Shallenberger. General Bristow.'
General Robb. and General Merritt
Seven generals in enc building struck
me as being a very good record in this
vicinity, but failed 20 see where they
came in. OF course there is some slighx
excuse for calling ar Payne General
since he is ahe Postmaster General.
but even that was not the custom when
did business before the department.
The calling Of the assistants and the
city postmaster by that high sounding
and wholly Inappropriate title think
quite out Of place"
-otO4i- u RcNSlk ears.
This old citizen is not the only one
TO whom this question appears ridicu-
loGs as il is commented on from time
to time by those who have little pa
ueuee with the practice Of bestowiny
titles indiscriminately. K is only Of
recent years that the military term has
become the style II the Postofice De-
partment but it has pervaded the build
Postmaster General it has descended TO
all his assistants. to the Attorney Cen
eral for the department. and 10 Mr.
Merritt OF the city postofice. And the
plan has its drawbacks. too. as Mr..
Merritt can testify
Maybe my vanity IS nattered b. if
and maybe not" said the city postnas-
ter a few DAYS ago in conversation with
a reporter FOR The Times. That Is nor
what am talking about now The point
IS that 1 have been taken for civil war
veteran and that gives me twenty years
or so that don't belong TO me That
hurts.
Taken for a Veteran.
Several times during the past year I
have received letters from old G. \. T.
veterans in the West asking me 70 use
my influence to help them get pensions.
That IS joke.
Dear General. they write. knowing
YOU TO he a veteran OF the civil war and
good Union soldier. I write 10 ask Il
YOU won't stir up the Pension Office and
set me pension We old comrades who
fought together from 81 to 60 must
stand by each other. and I know you
wall help me cut. Let me hear from you
soon. General
That is a little TOO mu1h,' cOlcluded
the yOuthful-lOOZing postmaster, and
II shows you what raise titles may lead
to-"