The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1904-10-12
THE NONPAREIL MAN

Stirred In the Heart Of an Old Polti-
cal campagner by Simple Incident
at lie sueur-BueIer William Jones
Blows Strains that Echo Along the
/ Walls Of Memory.
i Old General il out on the trail
| again. The general is like an old war
| horse. When there is political cam
paign on he smells powder, gets restless
| at night, attends a few meetings where
the other party is lying about his ia
| vorite candidates, gets thoroly mad at
the newspapers and then, before he
knows 1t, the general is on the stump
again. Despite rheumatic leg, due to
exposure In the Wilderness campaign,
despite increasing age and a throat like
a nutmeg crater and taste in his mouth
like an overshoe, for during campaign
work the general smokes to excess, de-
spite all these the old general is out
night and day saving the country.
! Tired out and disguised, the general
! reached the hotel at LIE Sueur the other
night and signed the register. He was
| looking forward to "a hot dinner and a
smoke and nights rest AS dinner
had not been called, the general dropped
YEARLY into chair: in the lobby Of the
hotel, where a few of the prominent cit
liens stood around to talk to him, shake
hands, introduce their friends and keep
him annoyed. Suddenly, outside was
liheard: r - = 1cs.sl'
'"Toot! Tootle-te-toot foot, toot, tootle-
te-toot-toot toot, tootle- toot toot
tootle- te-tum turn! Tootle-lootle lootle-
lootle lootle-lootle .toot! toot!! TOOTH!
Tum-tum! Tootle lootle! Tum!'
Nov what is that dam racket" asked
the general in a disguised tone.
why, general said a prominent cit
1zen, In surprised tone. THAT is Will
liam Jones, your old company bugler He
is here to serenade you. He says he
hasn't met you since+the war;" =.
The general stepped out on the veran-
da. A great crowd was gathered in the
street and Mr. Jones: had just drawn a
fresh supply Of toots from his horn. The
general held up his hand. turned aside a
moment to overcome his emotion, and
then said: *, =: 49,. ~.
''My friends my dear friends!! Par
don this emotion! It is but momentary
, The instant I heard those glorious ole
strains, recalling the days of old so WV
idly, exclaimed to those at my elbow
y AS I live, those notes can be blown; by
nobody but my old bugler, Bill Jones
t heaven bless him! (Cheers) I knew
) them the moment they vibrated along the
walls of memory. II hear them in my
, dreams! There are some recollection:
l that will not die. They are ever fadeles:
0 and green; Later, when I have washed
, off the stains Of travel, hope to grasl
= the hand of your toWnsman, William
= Jones, once more, and your hands also
b God. bless you'll, Good evening!!" Gran
o tic cheers.) ~ .r.: go. D.,
q 1t is said that the old. general has beer
s promised the inspectorship of dead am
!, down timber in the arid district.
Doc Bixby noted with tear that tn
t score at Boulder Col.,g last week was:
V So!oiauo ........:! .............
l. | Nebraska -. ..................
: Then the doctor seized his pen-.an
t wrote: :: wi ,~n :
J. ''The result at Boulder will give Eth
J.; muskrat-eaterS of Minnesota the impress
:, sion that they can. win the game on Oct
20 without working for it. Overconfi
J. dence may prove their undoing as It di
l. two years ago. .-...v -
!, While we are not overconfident. W
should be pleased to2have the doctor com
/ up here with his band of organized ruff
d fans and see them get it thrown int
n them about a mile. SO --.,f: :.
:, .4@..~ - - 70. rn-e4p 81 . a3gsH2 =. =,
/ Speaking of football,f the GRAND Fork
n IN. d. Press says That the.University {
r North Dakota is after big fellow name
u, Otto F'rlend.>@.Some of the dimensions {
J MI" Friend will be interesting 30 -
He is feet inches tall in his stock
ing feet. 49,. $500 -,
He wears No. s,h. shoe. -, ~,
He is not overwhelmed with fat, bu
t. has a fine physiuue::es -,~~--"..o- 49,
# He has exceptionally large bones, an
n is strong as an ox:5ss = -. sr.- r., :"
He weighs over compounds.
:: In games Of football in his home tow
So he gets the. ball Between his tmassiv
70 arms and deliberate lV:walks down the en-
T. tire, field for a. touchdown, with five {
- six good-sized fellows hanging to him
o. vain effort to down him. 80: 9 80: &c.
But he does not have to walk to ge
If | there He can run. =.
= He has often negotiated 100 yards
tourteen seconds and can do better wit
e. training. : : - q. :
le He is like stone WALL and laughs E
se the efforts Of the other players to pus
= him off his feet.
~ His nickname is "speevey," and whe
'd ne has suit of clothes made-he can
a. buy them ready made-he has to pay tt
- tailor $40 extra. r. y.
. Mr.. Friend is a mid hammered gentle
III man, but when he gets up his opponen,
IN all lie down. Heaven save us ALI
:. Paris Is a city of splendid surprise
40 New ideas are born sdaily in the city
20 new ideas. In the matter Of advertising
id for example, new devices are sought: in tt
th strangeSt directions. One Of the late
IS the utilization of the baldheaded ma
" who always has room at the top. - !
ne Who~is this parsonage we see approach
th 1ng?s asks a Paris correspondent: I'll
30 boulevard throngF turns and looks; wit
ls curioisity. i - - - s
ne He is dressed IN a brsnd-new frock su
of black, the trousers of discreet stri,
ce and the black silk hat brand new ar
shining. Why, \ he seems to know :.
10 many people. HeSbows to right and lei
edl Who can he be? Look how he bow
in Look how he lifts his high hat with
,d graceful sweep Of the arm! How can
1o know half the folks who pass? '
lg What. easeR' s. t.What grace!" "Is
e, an ambassador?,'ss 'tEIe must be gre
nd actor!' COR politician :-,s.s..s. I
10 The parsonage approaches. He is fl
-"' steps in front Of YOU: Aga in She lifts h
ca hat-he IS bowling to you. Stupefactio
N. He is bald! Marvelously bald! Al
ri painted in big letters Oh the shining bal
ness you readl =
nd Moulin Rouge! The. Toreador!"
III, All around him there are cries. of su
Is. prise and laughter, People rushsto Sc
rn But the elegant parsonage seems not
:. notice anything unusual He graveIy sea
at. himself at one of the little tables, Of
cafe terrace and orders mild drink T
'e takes a newspaper from his pocket al
rit begins reading. But before he begi
q reading he takes off his hat! And t
= astounded crowd reads on his bald hea
- Moulin Rouge! The Toreador!
is month ago there were only five
II. these bald HEADED living advertisement
Today there must, be 500 of them TIL
earn q dollar a day and their expenses
for drinks in cafe, terraces. Also they a
Hyr,II Iva, -