davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24
y
Contemporary Comment
rha .pssrk Iana Erooax eround. !

The case would be base enough and
bad enough if the Kentucffans en-
gagged 'fn<the business had dealt With
Mr.. Hearst--direct~ But 1t is not so.
They have sold themselves to travel
ing caraSsAnsary operating in the name
of Hearst and composed Of retaiaers
on the Hearst pay roll; wandering
minstrel from. Iowa, a perfpatetic re-
porter from the general staff of the.
Hearst newspapers, and a discredited
congressmAff from New York. Under.
theslead and lash OF these. and in, their
pay. a feEs home Janfssaries are to go
forth and instruct the Kentucky DEM
ocrats in their duty. 1t would be laugh
able il it were not monstrous.-Louis-l
vile Courier Journal.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24
President Goes to Croton.

WASHINGTON, d. e., May ga
President Roosevelt left this afternoon
for GFGton, Mass, to attend the exer-
cises to be held tomorrow incident to
the annual prize competition The
president wfif reach Gfoton tomorrow
morning and wifi return home Wednes-
day morning.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24
Why the da lsL Win.

!. The fuller our knowledge of the ac-
ton and of the operations which pre-
coded the action becomes, the stronger
grows our conviction that the Japan
csc owe their success upon land to the
qualities which they have displayed
throughout. the naval campaign. IHtely-
hgence, method and discipline are the
sources of their Victories. - London
Times
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24

women can do better than men. and
better than anything else in which
they engage. Let them look to this
first rnost~os5vieHs and most sacred
duty:
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24
Among the Merrymakers

A Bargain Spoiled.
Nom" said little
Johnny Cupp,
Let's trade baby
For a pup.
II kin git Bill
Sinks to trade,
Skin i'm in the
Deal thet's made"
When his mother
Said: "No, SIR"
Johnny made
Face at her.
Kansas City Times.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24
No Chance of Confusion There.

THE trouble with our people," ex-
claimed the popular orator, lis that they
too often confuse license With liberty"
license" interrupted thoughtful look
ing man from the audience, ''but / can
state emphatically that there is no con-
fusion between a marriage license and
liberty"
There were approving murmurs clear
back to the rear of the halI.-New Or
leans Times-Democrat
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24

And now an Indian wants to go to
congress. The innate cussedness %
the red man has evidently rendered
abortive so far the efforts Of those phi
lanthropists who have been trying to.
raise the standard OF his ambitions.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24
Royhood Of Great Men.

John d. Rockefeller, at the early age
Of eight. was milking the family cow
The animal refused to give down.
You contrary beast he said what
is the matter with you? Oh, see. You
have finished your bucket of wet bran.
must rebait you"
Years later with the aid of the rail-
ways, he applied the same principle in
the conduct of his business with great
success.-Chicago Tribune.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24
sxndieation Of the CLASSES.

The Republican party which Mr..
Roosevelt has captured, is but the Syn
dication of the Classes. 1t is only a
question of time when, if it is contin-
ued in power, nothing short of a revo-
lution---too likely to be bloody revo-,
lution-Will suffice to uproot it. Then
chaos. Then the deluge. Then the
Man-of+ Horseback. Is Louisville Cou-
rier- Journal
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24

The attention OF those negroes who
are going to hold a convention in Ten
nessee for the purpose of nominating
a presidential candidate is invited to
the fact that the Hon. Theodore
Roosevelt is still standing by his colcrs
and his eolored friends.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24
Her Memory.

Gayley-You haven't had occasion to
accuse me of playing poker for two
years now.
Mrs. Gayley-Three years, my dear.
Gayley-How do you know it's three
years?
Mrs. Gayley-Because I've worn this
dress that long and / got it the last time
I caught Philadelphia Press.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24

The man with the linelight is noti-
fed that May % DR.. Ohage's personally
conducted public baths will be opened.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24
Worse sim.

Attorney-Don't you think s25. 900 cash
would be punishment enough for his
breach of promise?
The Aggrieved One-Re, indeed; I want
hina to marry me.-Butte Inter Mountain.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24
A sympathetle Nature.

Young man." said the employer stern
~, YOU misinfor1ned me when you said
yesterday that you wanted to get away
to go to a funeral
Well. answered the youth who had
seen the home club defeated, ut wasn't
exactly a funeral But it was almost as
sad Washington Star
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24
The Anrll Eonl.

The April fools not out of range.
You'll find him here and there:
He is the fool who's led to change
His winter underwear.
-Phila delpflia Press
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24
The Mountain Resort.

Now doth the mountain pirate bold
Send forth his ads to every quarter,
Wherein poor city folks are told
OF lots of iron in the water"
And when prospective guests are seen
He rubs his palm across his knuckles
And drops the rusty plowshare keen
Into the well-and then he chuckIes.
New York Sun
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24
Mothsr Earth

Il wonder why people always speak Of
Earth as She2"
exactly what her age is.-Ph iladel7rhia
Ledger.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24

If the Hon. w. J. Bryan has really
set his mind on going to the United
States senate the Hon. Nelson w. AL
'df1ch might as wen get ready for jolt
or two asa0|
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24

proVe>tha modern man is capable of
personal sacrifice in spite of the spirit
of cornmercialism which is. said to
typify the age.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24
connictlnn nntirs.

''Anfa. IL your mistress at homer
I'D ruther we wouldn't ask me- mum
I've jined the Salvation Army Chicago
Tribune
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24

The Mississippi viii fan in the vicinity
OF st Paul during the next thirty six
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-24
Danger Gauge Change in

washington time e pm. St. Paul..
River BRlletin-s
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11
CHURCH ENRoLLs WlNEMAN.
As Result Assistant Minister and Dea
cons Tender designations.

New York. March I0.-Rather than
countenance in church membership a
man engaged in the liquor business,
the Rev, Edwin NJ Martin, assistant
pastor of the Lewis Avenue Congrega-
tional church, Brooklyn, has handed in
his resignation. lie came to the Brook
lyn church from Richland Center, Wis,
a year ago. Two deacons may also re-
sign.
The cause of the trouble is a wealthy
wine merchant. With his family he
has attended the church many years
and recently decided to formally be-
come an enrolled member. When his
name was presented there was warm
opposition on the part of Rev. Martin.
backed by several deaconeses and two
deacons, but the merchant was ad-
mitted and the assistant minister's
resignation followed.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11

Ne" YORK, March lV.--Bankers VINO
have assumed the financial guardian
sh,n ~ the Hartman railroad system
.....,,.. !. 49, ,y.,a ..,.o-
w i"' sei'ou' e"A' ot'on ''e poD
lem OF unifying the funded debt Of the
Southern Pacific system. II has been
generally known for a long time that
some comprehensive plan must be pre-
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11
MORE RIOTS.

Disturbances Of strikers are moi
nearly as grave as an Individual disor-
der OF the system. overwork, loss Of
sleep nervous tension will be followed
by utter collapse, unless a reliable rem
edy Is Immediately employed There's
nothing so efficient to cure disorders
Of the Liver and Kidneys as Electric
Bitters. It's wonderful tonic, and
effective nervine and the greatest all
around medicine for run down systems,
It dispels Nervousness. Rheumatism
and Neuralgia and expels Malaria
germs. Only soc, and satisfaction guar
anteed by Chas. Rogers, druggist
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11
BANKERS CONSIDER PROBLEM
OF SOUTHERN PACIFIC DEBT

be reached however. without altering
the character Of the Southern Pacific's
holding of any of its properties or or
iginating any new device for welding
together the debts Of the constituent.
companies.
The frame upon which the great plan
VIII hang will be general refunding
mortgage. The amount will depend
upon how much of the debt Of the sys-
tenn which aggregates s36s.51s,41s cap
be included in any refunding mortgage.
however broad in Its scope.
Debts OF some properties which
should be included in the refunding
scheme are held by ownership stock.
Others are held by lease. Some Of the
operating companies are owned by
other operating companies and some
are held directly by Southern Pacific
Company, which is a Kentucky cor
poration. It is difficult. in some in
stances, to carry out the plan Of har-
monizing and unifying the system
without coming into conflict with state
laws.
1t Is on account Of the differences
presented by this complicated situation
that the work has been started well in
advance Of the time for its inaugura-
ton.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11


now to tell on him. He fell asleep
willis was IN the courtroom. and IN
a little while he was snoring. Thd
snorer. Of course. disturbed the pro-
ceedings Of the court, but the Judge
showed great tact in interruptlng with
out embarrassing the crier. 'crier
Jones ). he said In a loud voice: 'crier
Jones, some one Ii sno1ng!' The crIer
awakened with start and jumped to
his feet. 'SIIence!" he exclaimed.
There must be no snoring in the court
room -and he gIared ferceiy all about
him"
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11
Chamberlain Reported III.

New York, March 1O,-Considerable
anxiety regarding Joseph Chamber
lain's condition is being manifested on
account of the circulation of reports
among members of the house of COM
mons, says a Times dispatch from
London. The former colonial secre-
tary is touring Egypt and the rumors
find little credence among his friends.
Persons opposed to his fiscal policy are
regarded, by them as chiefly response
BILE for their circulation of the story.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11
CAME NEAR DYING
From an Awful Skin HumouF.
Scratched Till Blood Ran.
Wasted to Skeleton.
CURED BY cUTIcURA
One Application Soothed Him to
Sleep. Cure Speedy
and Permanent.

"When my little boy was about three
months old his head broke out with q
rash, which was very itchy and ran con.
siderable watery fluid. We tried every-
thing we could, but he got worse all the
time till 1t spread to his arms, legs, and
then to his entire body, and he got 90
bad that he came near dying. The rash
would itch SO that he would scratch till
the blood ran, and thin yellowish stuff
would be all over his pillow in the morn
ing. had to put mittens on his hands
tokeep him from tearing his skin around
his wrists. He got so weak and run
down that he took fainting spells like
we would think him dying. He was al-
most skeleton and his little hands
were thin like claws.
He was bad about eight months
when we tried Cuticura Remedies. 1
had not laid him down in his cradle In
the daytime for long time. He had
got so that he just slept in our arms all
the time. washed him with Cuticura
Soap and put on one application of
Cuticura Ointment and he was so
soothed that I put him in the cradle.
You don't know how glad felt when he
felt better. Ittook one box of Cuticura
Ointment, pretty near one cake OF Cuti-
cnra Soap, and about half bottle OF
Cuticura Resolvent, to cure. think
our little boy would have died only for
the Cutlcura Remedies, and shall al
ways remain firm friend of them"
MRS. M. G. MAITLAND, JASPER,
ONTARIO.
No return In IA years. Mrs. Maitland
writes, under date of Feb. "a, 1908, that
the cure Is permanent.
" 1t affords me much pleasure to In
form you that it is fourteen years since
my boy was cured Of the terrible skin
disease from which he suffered.
" He has been permanently cured and
Is hearty and strong"
Sold throughout the world. Cuileura ResoiTsnl ses.
On form Of ChoeoAia Coated Fila 3e Per vial AZ 90
Ointment E0c. HoaD a6c. Dep0sa Aondona 81 Charlaf~
heuse 8q, Psrla kna dc 4 FzxI Boston, ~ Coumtaa
Ave. Potter Drug Chem. Cslp. See Ffegr.lofr.
- Send f1g Hgw 70 Cua Areu humeszs
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11
SURGICAL OPERATION WILL
DEPRIVE PATIENT OF SPEECH
Theatrical Bids Farewell to Friends Be-
fore Submitting TO Implacable
Knife of Surgeon.

New York. March 1o.--Thomas J.
Mcguire. treasurer OF a theater here
and widely known in the profession Of
the stage. has said farewell to his
friends in preparation for a surgical
operation which will deprive him cf
ever speaking again II. indeed. he sur
wives with his life.
Mcguire came here In 1891 from San
Francisco. where he had been treas
urer Of two leading theaters For years
he had smoked rs or more cigars daily
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11
II Bill Was There.

| Are making such fuss
Tho cables would be sizzln' hot
A-tellln' of the fights they fought,
FOR Pill he's got the whole thing plan
ned
How each one ought TO make a stand,
And just how either could begin
And. with no tricks at all, could win.
There would be no trouble in the air
| IL Bin was there
II Tsill was there
He'd take his submarines
And rapid fire machines
.And tow 'em slowly, after dark,
Right up TO where he's put mark
Near tffat there town-its name b'gee,
I.uns out some fifteen miles to sea-
And then. you bet there'd something
drop
He'd fight 'em, and on top.
And some one. sure. Sould get a
scare
II Bill was there
II Bill was there
He's stuck dozen pins
To mark the outs and ins
OF how he'd march a million men
Across the land and back again,
And put the foemen in the ditch.
Whose men? What side? He don't
Care which,
He says sometimes he fairly aches
To see how both sides makes mistakes.
There would be fightin' everywhere
II Bill was there
II Bill was there
Bnt he's at Miller's store
Him and dozen more
or our towns keenest strategists
With stubby pencils in their fists.
Concoctin battles and campaigns
That take in all the seas and plains.
II either one-the Russ or jap
Is lookn' for likely chap
To run the war with tact and skill
They'll send for Bill.
Chicago Tribune
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11
MADE LOVE TO TWIN.
Husband Sued Because He Couldn't
Tell Which From Tother.

Husband Sued Because He Couldn't
Tell Which From Tother.
Fon Du Lac, Wis. March 1o.-Di-
vorce proceedings have commenced by
Mrs, Pauline Heilmann against her
husband. August Heilman, A sister
Of the plaintiff Miss Emma Xix, is
cited as the cause of most Of the do
nestle trouble,
The complaint alleges that He'll
mann was constantly lavishing his
affections on Miss Xix. Mr.. He'll
mann is said not to deny that he was
affectonionate toward Miss Xix, but
she being twin sister of the woman
he married and living with them con-
stantly since the wedding, he was puz-
zled to tell which was which.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11

and this It is supposed, started can
cerous growth at the root Of his
tongue. Thinking little Of the irritation
Mcguire neglected consulting a doctor
until recently and then 1t was found
that the removal Of his tongue would
be the only means Of saving his life.
Mcguire, after long deliberation. de-
cided to undergo the operation, but 20
greatly has it preyed upon his mind
that his hair Is said to have turned
snowy white in the past six weeks
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11
Commander. Decorated.

st. Petersburg. March 10.-The com
manders of the Russian warshipS
variag and Korietz have had conferred
upon them the decoration of the mill
tary order of st. George of the fourth
class on account Of their heroic con-
duct in the engagement with the Jap
anese at Chenulpo. The other officers
and crew Of the vessels have been Civ
en- minor decorations, including crosses
of the order of st. George.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11
1T SAVED HIS LEG.

P. A. Danforth, Of La Grange, Ca,
suffered for six months with a fright
ful running sore on his leg; but writes
that Bucklin's Arnica Salve wholly
cured It in Ave days. For Ulcers.
Wounds. Piles, it's the best salve in
the world. Cure guaranteed. Only
25c. Sold by Chas. Rogers, druggist.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11
mo- snorlna.

Postmaster General Payne tells a
good story of an incident in Milwau-
kee courtroom. in which, through the
kindness and tact of the Judge, the
court crier was saved fine. Il one
day attended" said Mr.. Payne, "a ses-
ion of the court at which this judge
presided. The court crier was very
old man: he had served with fidelity
for many years, but age was beginning
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11

New York. March 10.--Jockey George
odom has signed a contract to ride
this season for James r. Keene, For
several years odom has been attached
to the stable Of Captain S. S, Brown,
the Pittsburg ccal magnate, and It is
understood his new contract provides
that the Keenes shall have only Sec
ond call Tor his services, with a large
retainer.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11

John Sharp Williams, the Mississippi
wit. tells Of a southern friend whose
colored valet fell in love with pair Of
loud checked trousers which his master
owned. BY way of Fastening the day
when they should be turned over 10
him he threw some grease on them,
Then he reported that he was unable to
remove the spots. Have you tried
everything, saln?" said his master.
eyes sah."
"Have you tried ammonia?"
mo, sab" replied Sam, inslnuatlngly.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11

Port Arthur March 10.--A message
from the signal station at II o'clock
last night announced the appearance of
a japanese squadron on the horizon.
Fifty minutes later the shore batteries
opened fire on the Japanese vessels. A
gale sprang up and the attacking fleet
soon withdrew
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11
Russia's Popular Song.

In my trans -Baikalian home upon the
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS,
with my brother Dimetriiiskiorbrne
ovitch l used to play;
And our cousin Petroplanztrsvm from
DjargamoguvmzszoslSi
Oft would come to visit rs and spend
the day.
All, those happy, sunny hours of our
childhood!
How weep to think that they viii
come no more;
For in ruins lies the home within the
wildwood,
Far away upon the zmiehogsmiRt-
qvzworsld shore.
Chorus
Oh, the moon is shining bright upon the
Zmiehogmiptqvzworski,
Where the catfish browses on the
new mown hay;
Through the szczyamores the candle
lights are cleaning,
On the banks Of the Zmiehoksmipt-
qvzworsli far away.
Council Bluffs Nonpariel
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11
Horses Stay in Russia.

st. Petersburg, March. 10.-An i'm
perlal ukase has been issued prohibit
ing the expectation of horses from Rus
sia until further notice. Even for the
expectation of single horses with ped
igrees permission from the head of
the remount department must first
be obtained.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11
Prisoner Commits Suicide.

New York, March 1o.--A japanese
shipping agent, who was arrested Mon
day on suspicion Of supplying Rus
SLAMS with Information has committed
suicide in the military prison. says a
Tientsin dispatch to the American. II
IL said several other japanese are un-
der suspicion.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11
SUBMARINES
PROVE GOOD
Withstand Sham Attack On
Portsmouth by Fleet Of
Battleships.
OFFICERS DISPUTE VICTORY
Claim That Movements Could
Not Be Maintained ifPut
to the Test of q Real
Engagement.
OFFICERS DISPUTE VICTORY

New York. March ia remarkable
test Of submarine boats has been made
at Portsmouth, according TO Herald
dispatch from London. In the course
OF the maneuyers now In progress there
II was decided 10 attack the defense Of
the harbor and learn what could be
done by the submarines In repelIlne
the assault
The assaiIant was the home feet un-
der Admiral Wilson, consisting OF -four
battleshlps with Ave cruisers, which
received orders 10 force an entrance
into Portsmouth harbor. The subma-
rIne fiotila was aware that the attack
would be made at night. and when the
battleships were within range OF the
forts, the latter opened n terrific fire.
Under cover OF this cannonade four tor
pedo destroyers put to sea and steamed
toward the assallants. Alongside each
destroyer and close under her port
beam was a submarine. screened from
the battleshIps
The destroyers approached within
striking distance OF the battleships
amid n fearful roar of blank ammuni-
ton from the forts and ships. When
the appointed distance had been reach
ed the four destroyers fell back. putting
on all steam.
Al the same instant the submarines
sank and In few minutes later arose,
one alongside each battleship and
claimed the latter as their victims.
The crews Of the submarines dis
played great skill and endurance in
their work. but their claims to victory
are disputed by the officers of the bat
tleshlps. who say such movements
would have been impossible In real
engagement.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11
WORKING OVERTIME.

Eight hour laws are ignored by those
tireless little workers-Dr, Kings New
Life Pills. Millions are always at work
night and day, curing Indigestion, Bill
BUSINESS, Constipation, Sick Headache
and all Stomach, Liver and Bowel
troubles. Easy, pleasant, safe, sure.
Only 25c at Chas Rogers drug store.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11

IT owe my whole life to Burdock
Blood Bitters. scrofulous sores covered
my body seemed beyond cure. B. B,
B, has made me perfectly we'll wo-
man." Mrs. chas. Hutton. Berville,
Mich.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1904-03-11

Il amt tried dem on me. but I'm sho'
them pants1l fit me good.
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1904-09-02

salesman, who knew his customer
lived in Montclair and came through
the Hoboken tunnel every morning.
:Kissed the wrong woman in the
car, eh? Or is it the family cat?"
"Facetiousness. sir retorted the
customer angrily. II bought one OF
your safety razors yesterday, and
this is the result I was guaranteed
that it was safety razor. Tell me,
does this look like safety shave:'
1T doesn't for a fact answered
the salesman. "You might have done
better with an axe or the bread
knife. Did you bring the razor with
your
The customer tossed it on the
counter. There is the internal
thing" he roared 1T ought to be
made a crime to sell another one. I
want my money back"
The salesman examined the razor.
Had this thing apart since you
bought it, haven't you?"
eyes, I took it to pieces to show
my wife how it worked. But that
made no difference I put it together
all right
ssvo,, J:d ~ ;" c,;d the co1ecnoan
"Well, if we had an office boy in the
store who put razor together like
that he'd be fired. You've spoiled
the razor as much as you've spoiled
your face. You'd be a good man to
mend a clock, you would. Money
back: You'll have to come in later
and see the boss. But I wouldn't
show him that razor unless he is
feeling good, if I were you"