Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1904-04-16
TAUGHT. HIM MANNERS

l I'll f9
| For humber Of years this mother and
daughter suffered together under heavy
and poignant grief.
| The husbandl and father was one Of the
best men imaginable, kind, indulgent. even
tempered 9 bountiful provider, trustworthy
as Str Bernardo model husband and
father In all respects save one
He wasa sword swallower.
| 1t was as natural for him to eat pie ana
peas wfthca knife as 1t is for rabbit to
| eat lettuce from its paws.
He had risengin the world from an humble
environment, and 1t is g. Observation-Disclosures
| sociological fact that an humble environ
| ment and sword swallowing are cannota-
! tons.
HIS wife had undergone years of hope
less misery because Of her husbands ad-
hesion to the knife method of partakinR or
food before her daughter, with the letting
| GOWN OF her skirts and the putting up OF
things.
AS soon as the daughter arrived at this
| run-things stage of life. however, she be-
| gan the agitation
It's all your fault. mamma" she told
her mother time and again. ITS your
place 70 tell papa how awful 1t looks to
other folks"
| I'll never tell him in the wide world.
aaughter. the mother would reply. help
/
thing: He is so kind and good, and /
wouldn't say anything to hurt his feelings
| TOT anything on earth Not only would he
| angry"
But he would have no right to become
| angry, the daughter would argue. with
sn the co o. of youth It's dreadful.
ana It is perfectly astonishing that he
Doesn't see 1t. It's the one thing that papa
| does that is frightful"
Last summer the daughter quite pointedIy
refused 10 90 to the seaside with her father
and mother. saying that she would much
| prefer to go to auntie's place I'm in the
mountains of Pennsylvania. Her father
tr1ed coaxing and cajoling. saying that he
Man.eo 70 snow off his pretty daughter on
| the boardwalk, but she was as adamant
| no use, mamma" she said private
| ~ to her mother. II simply can't bear to
nave the mean, common things that we
wnen they see papa eating caulitiower ana
tnlngs with his knife-indeed l can't! 1t ia
s soo Illuminating: You and papa go to the
seaside. ana shall go to Aunt Laura's"
!nasmucn as nothing can exceed the ease
Win "nich an only daughter of an Amerf.
can FAMILY can get by with any old kind of
proposition that she chooses to submit
i H. of OUT OF council, this daughter went to
| hes Aunt Lauras last summer, while her
| suHering mother and her complainant
| 1ather went down to the beach
-, men they all got back to Washington in
the autumn the daughter had a great
| scheme to suggest to her mother.
1t was funny she said 1.-THE way I
Jumped out OF the frying pan into the fire
IN gong up to Aunt Laura's. You should
| see the way my cousins, the girls as well
| as the boys. act at the table! Such table
] manners! When they were all taking soup
| together. 1t sounded like freight locomo-
| i've ploWlng OF steam on a winters night
| Ihey all held their forks as if they were
! augurs. and mercy me and gracious sakes
| alive, how they did shovel the food into
t tnelr mouths with their knives! The one
\ tharn
at Aunt Isauna.s table to jeer and jibe"
On. khow that Sister Laura's children
are being brought up like Moquis." said the
| mother, but L can't see what good it does
for you to tell me what 1 know already.
1 cant help their table manners can II"
| why, certainly not. mamma" said the
daughter. but. all the same. I am going to
find the table manners Of my cousins useful
| just you wait and see. l am going to in
vite the whole crew of them to visit us in
Washington am going to reform papa
! by suggestion, see?"
And then she went ahead and unfolded
| the scheme to her mother. The mother
| didn enthase over the plan, although she
| admitted that there was a remote possibiH-
| ty of its working successfully.
| One day, in October last, the husband
| and father came home with a glad smile
| and announced that he had purchased that
| day three tickets for a midwinter cruise
| on one of the beautiful yacht-like German
| steamers. of the Mediterranean, including a
visit to the Holy Land-a three-months'
| trip. p" -f'
! The mother and daughter were properly
| enthusiastic but they exchanged gIances.
| The chances meant. as plainly as if the
| words had been exchanged, that they both
1 dreaded the exhibition of dads knife-swal-
| lowing stunt before such an exclusive not
| to say highfalutin'. crowd as party en-
| barking a midwinter cruise of the Med
| iterranean was bound to be.
| The very night the outgoing mail carried
| from both mother and daughter, a cordially
| worded invitation to Sister Laura's chill
| dren, five In all-three strapping yokels of
| boys and two noisy and blowsy girls-to
| come to Washington at once for a two
| weeks visit. 6
| just three days after having received The
| invitation.
AS sword-swallowers those nephews and
| nieces by marriage of the head of the house
| had him tied into bow-knots, bucked and
| gagged and tossed into a limekiln.
| The head of the house watched them at
| their meals with a queer. fascinated inten-
| sity for couple of days.
| Remind me of railroad construction
| gang I bossed once when I was young
feller." he remarked to his enchanted wife.
| Swell lot of relatives you've got, Mandy
! On the second day of their visit he began
| to address himself. somewhat clumsily at
| first. but with increasing confidence as be
got the hang of it, to the of his fork
| in the partaking of his food.
| Long before the visit of the Pennsylvania
| relatives came to an end he had yielded
| wholly to the power of reversed suggestion
| and had forever ceased to be a sword
| swallower. The Mediterranean cruise was
/ joyous affair. and so gloriously free of
| emba ira ssment to the wife and daughter
| that they could scarcely realize how it had
| all come about
| They brought back a mighty handsome
| lot of souvenirs for their Pennsylvania
| relatives.