Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1904-06-28
DAILY SHORT STORY
A Courtship in Rhyme.
IOriginal.l


mind that the independence of single
life was far preferable to the slavery
Of marriage.
The bachelor could enjoy his income
without having TO think of the con-
stantly wearing toes of children's
shoes, the changes of wOmen's fash
ions, indeed all such absorbers OF funds.
He noticed that as soon as his friends
We're married-at least those with aver
age incomes-instead of spending 10
cents for cigar they would either
spend ., smoke IA pipe or go without
tobacco entirely. And as for drinking
their accustomed cocktail, they sudden
Iy found that cocktails were bad for
the stomach. This. Whitridge averred,
was because neither the coffee bean
nor lemon peel would keep their wives
from a knowledge of the situation and
a consequent lecture.
When Whitridge was thirty-five and
beginning to tire of his bachelOrhood,
though he was unconscious of the
transition, he met Grace BEDFORD, a
sprightly little girl, to whom he made
no scruple TO confide his matrimonial
prejudices. Miss Redford astOnished
him not only by agreeing with him,
but by ut-HerOding HerOd." She de
Clared that marriage was n greater
bondage TO the woman than to the
man. and If Il woman married man
he should consider himself under great
obligations to her. This was Il new
and startling view OF the case to Whit
ridge Indeed II excited certain acrid
spirit within him that drove him TO
continue more bitterly than before his
CnslaughtS on marriage. But whether
that was really owing to Miss Red
fOrds views or that Il certain witchery
there was about her GOaded him on it
is impossible to say. At any rate he
grew more sneering every time he met
her. One evening while they were on
the subject Whitrldge borrowed dia-
mond ring she wore and scratched on a
window pane:
There's many man, when the key has
On the wedIock for which he has ardently
yearned.
Would give all the wealth in his bank or
his pocket
And borrow besides. for a key TO I'M
lock II.
Whitridge had spent hours over the
composition of this jingle and was very
proud of ii. He was quite astonished
when Grace seized the ring and
scratched in Il few moments this I'M
prOmptu:
There's many a girl, when embarked on
life's stream.
Which has been till the moment sweet
summer dream,
VIII find when too late that her fancy
has led her
To plunge in the waves In a desperate
header.
Whitridge was falling in love with
out knowing it. That's the reason he
was becoming more bitter every time
he met Miss Redford and tiinging his
vituperations at her only to have them
flung back with interest.
Then Miss BEDFORD fell i'll. Whit
ridge felt sorry for her, so he sent her
some flowers. On the card accompany
ing them he wrote:
When n maiden is sick and deprived Of
her pOV ers,
A friend may console with few simple
flowers.
When a wife is struck down and her ill
ness has locked her
At home, her poor husband must pay for
a doctor.
To which Miss Redford responded:
Thanks; a wife in poor health must slave
like niger"
While her masters food craving grows
bigger and bigger
When a husband the presence of pain liz
deploring,
He keeps up uproar of bowling and
roaring.
And so the courtship went on. Miss
BEDFORD regained her health and Mr..
WhitridGe was delighted. The men at
his club declared that during her i'll
ness he had been insufferable, but since
her recovery he was never at the club.
Then Whitridge fell Ill himself. He
had an attack Of bronchitis which con-
fined him to his room in a bachelor
apartment house. Day after day, week
after week. he stayed there alone. Miss
Bedford sent him some Jelly, but
bachelors don't care for such food, and
he gave it TO the janitor's wife. Miss
BEDFORD did not send him any dog
gerel she knew he was without SYM
pathy and refrained. At last after
months Of confinement, the invalid's
resolution broke down. and he made
the following plant, which he sent by
messenger to Miss BEDFORD:
In a home there are kids to be constantly
Squalling,
A woman dissatisfied. caudles appalling.
There are servants to leave without ever
warning.
Their fellows the offers OF housekeepers
scorning.
There are bills coming IN and funds grow
ing smaller.
The kids likewise growing extensively
taller.
Ones Joys are divided, and yet every
trouble
In the family state must loom up as a
double
But give me all this for a pair OF SOFT
eyes
To look into mine and make patient re-
plies
To my groans and complaints. and hand
on my head
To smooth or my fever and smooth out
my bed
There are two soft brown eyes In a dear.
loving face
I wish with mo nov-they are yours, |
dearest Grace.
I would faIn bid farewell TO my bachelor I
life