The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1904-05-17
TIE NONpAREJL MAN

TIE NONPAREJL MAN
A Fisherman's Story Regarding the way
In Which the Woodcock Lures the
EarthWorms to the Surface OF ! the
Ground-A Bit Of Natural History on
Which Some Doubt Has Been Cast by
the Habits of Fishermen.
One of those scoundrels who gees out
and pretends to catch his fish, instead OF
decently buying them like a gentleman,
brings IN an apochryphal story of the |
way in which a woodcock obtains it's
worms. In fact he claims to have seen
the bird Turing the fish bait to the surface
of the ground. Choosing a piece of cho-
colate colored rich looking soil, the
woodcock dug some fifteen or twenty /
holes in this soil, an inch or two apart |
with his bill. Then he began kind Of
cake walk. He beat the earth with his
wings; he raped it with his bill sharply;
leaping into the air, he alighted, stiff
and heavy, on his feet. Was the wood
cock insane? Evidently not. For now
the noses of many inquisitive earth
worms began to protrude from the holes
the bird had drilled The earthworms
had heard the noise and they wished to
know what the trouble was. They turned
their heads slowly from side to side. The
woodcock devoured them, one by one.
This story was told seriously and we
didn't like to laugh for fear Of displaying
ignorance of natural history. We do,
however, cherish some small fear as to
the postmortem condition of all fisher
men, due to- the general habit of the
brotherhood of seeing, things with other,
larger eyes, than ours.
But can anybody tell if the woodcock
or any other bird does really lure his
worms to the surface. by means of a
cakewalk? s.z..-s
Kuropatkin may be- about to lure the
Japanese to Mukden and then work
corner in rice. T.
The esteemed officer of an Illinois
Woman's club has appropriated 81, 900 Of
the organizations money to her own uses,
and has politely assured the club that it
was no business of the members what she.
did with it. Of course the lady admits
that the money practically belongs to the
club and that to anextent she is RESPONSE
bic for it, but for the present she will en-
ploy it where, in her opinion, 1t will do
the most good 9fNVet doarlot wish to make,
any unpleasant remarks as to the 7exor-
bitant7 prices Of rmilhnery;,but they would
seem to justify, to an extent. the position
so firmly taken by the lady. ?sy
The green peach, with a couple of feet
Of stomach ache carefully curled up~in it,
has shown it's face unblushingly in New
York.
In the North American Review Gertrude
Anterior vigorously assails the magazine
novel and short story anaemic timid,
orthodox and commonplace. The trouble
with Gertrude Is that she wants the
novel to tell all about the violation of a
certain one Of the ten commandments. We
refuse to particularize further.
| Mr.. Rockefeller is giving away a lot
| of good business advice. We would take
| it If we had the money.
| A Canadian genius with. a gift for abu-
sive backtalk affirns that the earth. is
| flat, and offers 500 to any astronomer
who will debate with him. good stout
arguer on the bad end of any subject can
make the regular look pretty ridiculous.
Don't argue.
The tootatorian and the valuetudinarian
of the dear old class Of '04 are getting
busy. (: =
Ella Wheeler Wilcox's latest poem says:
Whatever you do, keep sweet This
would be nice motto for lemon,
| wouldn't it?
/ Don't wear your tongue to the bone on
1 the big St. Louis expo stamp. Use a
sponge.
The motto of the new Panama repub-
! lie IS "Paz, Libertad, Unto, Progresso."
We would suggest that the word "Bing''
be added to this bunch.
There are ten or twenty automobiles
In Cando, N. D., known by such cheerful
names as "The Gumshoe Footpad,'' ."The
Scairt Steer "The Triplets' Terror, and
1.-THE Poisoned Pup" The Cando Demo-
crat calls for a bylaw making the display
Of these names imperative.
"A Japanese diplomat at Victoria ex-
planned to the press: there the cause OF
the Japanese trea tment Of war correspon-
/ dents. 81
!. IF you are fighting for your life with
1 a much stronger gentleman said the Of
fetal, would you like to have him know
I just what you were going to do next?'
4 A. w. Carl has excited the small BOYS
land girls of Ortonville by purchasing ono
small Mexican burrozfo the children. The
\ Ortonville Journal says it resembles q
"A we'll uS0u uOOiludC- ornamental W1Cns ears
{ and tail. It came by freight billed thru
as lone small Mexican bureau causing
the officials much anxiety thereby.
Il The Citizens Business League of Mil.
q waukee Is aking an attempt to entic.
the American press humorists' convention
. there next year While we prefer water
we are not averse to meeting at Milwau-
kee one year.
DR.. Burtaro .Adacki, a japanese ply
stefan, has recently published a book deal
ing with the doors of different peoples:
AS every living animal possesses, he says,
a characteristic odor, SO different races
of men may be distinguished by odors
which vary with different classes Of peo-
). pie or according to their states Of health
Just as horses and dogs have a certain
odor which the person Of ordinary. sense
! perception can distinguish between. SO diff
). ferent races Of men have their character
! istfc odors.
! DR.. Adacki states that s'it is certain
that the western peoples possess nat.
: ural odor which is not perceived; by them
! but which is clearly perceptible to the
yellow race After certain length O.
+ time. however. both japanese and Chimes,
who have taken UP their residence il
: Europe Aecome habituated to this odor
7 1t ing the experience Of these Asian
u thai the odor Of Europ scans, which a