The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1904-12-22

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days later Mr.. Harden came into the fell
lows shop, and was greeted with most
cordial smile.
tailor. II have your book bought, an
when | have more dose English studied
will him read"
got aut a copy Of the October Harper
Bazaar and began to turn the pages
ITO tell you de trude, Mr.. Harben," he
went on. Il no understand your book al
open at a double-page fashion pIate-''will
you please tell me what you got all desc
womens IN here for?"
Say Dudley what business do you
I'm preacher"
~oh. get out. What are you giving
%Bgt ! am. I preach every Sunday"
In Louisville"
Wen. never; I never would ha'
thought Il. You ain't stuck up q bit like
most Of the preachers down this way"
An invitation to hear this new-made
by scribbled card. and the next Sab
bath saw the rustic, In his Sunday
best ushered into the bishops own pew,
Mnere ne listened intently 70 both serv-
He was manIfestly amazed, afterward,
| 70 nave the orator Of the morning come
down TO greet him as cordially and IA
miliarly as IN the woods.
He managed to stammer his thanks and
added: amt much Of judge OF this
KIND OF thing. parson. but I riz with you
and sot with you. and saw the thing
i through the best / knew how: but all
the same II my opinion Is wurth any
thing q. you. the Lord meant you for a
shooter"
AZ a dinner that Gen. corbin, during the
honor OF his stan and the foreign milf
tary attaches. the conversation turned to
/ war time foraging. and Gov. Bates said:
There was much talk Of the foraRing
among the veterans gathered in Boston IN
August. one veteran told about captain
and a certain drummer.
This drummer could almost make
drum talk. There was hardly his equal In
the army. Hence on every occasion OF
importance. he was put fl a conspicuous
post, and by his great skill with the
drumsticks he reflected credit on his COM
pany,
the army one morning entered a con-
quered town. The tanned young heroes
stepped out splendidy. The sidewalks
were crowded with onookers. The drum-
mers and the ffers filled the air with
brisk. lnspiriting music.
The captain marched with the colonel
This Is all good music. sir. he said
but l want 70 call your attention 70 my
with red hair
''The two officers looked AT The skilled
drummer. and lol he was not drumming
az ali. His sticks were thrust in his hip
pocked, and he marched idly and gaily
along, Joking and winking at the girls
" smith, cried the captain, angrily. go
over 10 the drummer and find out why he
i negleesing his duty In this shameful
Trooper smith departed, and on his re-
turn he whispered IN the captains ear.
z The drummer has two geese ard a
turkey in his drum. sir. and he says the
The captain glanced hastily at the
colonel 10 see II Smiths whisper had been
overheard. Then he said in loud. pleas
. on, very wen. Why didn't he say
before that he had rheumatism in his
armsg
During the trial OF the postal grafters
r. j. Wynue was violently attacked in
court by thu attorney general OF Mary
land, whca said that the assistant post
master gt~eral was high roller" who
lived on canvasback duck and green peas
The president. who read the speech. asked
Wynne what he was going to do about
this assertion regarding his epicurean
diet II have concluded gravely an
swered Wynne, ito cut out the peas"
= r
An Indiana physician tells this story on
himself. After writing prescription for
a patient, the physician told him that
the druggist would probably charge him
90 cents for iliing Il. Then the patient
asked the physician TO lend him the 60
cents Thereupon the physician carefully
scratched out a part Of the prescription.
and handed n back with 10 cents, remark
Ing: You can get that filled for dime.
what ! scratched out was for your
nerves. but you need nothing for them"
= r =
A t..r,...r ~ , xx-..tevr ~t.,. 49,. -.
to another part Of the country on busl-
ness On arriving at his destination. he
found he had forgotten the name Of the
Arm he had come TO see and had left all
eniightenlng memoranda in his desk
After wasting valuable time In useless
efforts 20 remember, he telegraphed home
10 his partner for the necessary informa-
ton He got II. and more. Your busi-
ness is with smith 4 Jones his part
ner's message ran: your name Is
Brown"
Ex-senator Thomas Carter OF the st
Louis Exposition company tells story OF
a Chicago family visiting the fair who
were asked BY one what had impressed
them most al the big show. Well" said
the eldest girl. who took II upon herself
to be the spokesman for tine party. 1
rather think we liked that picture OF
Adam and Eve. along with the apple and
the serpent so that struck you most
forcibly3" the friend asked Eyes, in
deed. we found IL most interesting. We
knew the anecdote. you seei'
The late Senator Quay. who was af-
nicted with Insomnia. one day announced
that ne had found a cure for It. III you
70 10 bed and find that you cannot 20 to
sleep" said ne. "the thing to do Is 10
get up and take a big slug Of old rye
whisky; then retire. After a proper In
terval. n you are still awake. get up and
take another drink. II a half hour goes
by and you are still awake. get up and |
take n third drink and then II you are
stili awake take another" And after /
that" queried a hystander, what next2''
After that" said Quay, with a broad /
smile. you won't care whether you go
to sleep or not
The town OF Perkins. Ne, has ten |
voters who at the last election all voted /
the Republican ticket Years ago the /
vote was larger. being twelve Republic
an and one Democratic. Upon one occa-
sion however there was an announce /
meme OF a Democratic gain, which FOR |
time excited some surprise. The voters 4
were being counted at headquarters, and /
when the returns from Perkins were 4
reached the man who had charge Of the /
romarkcd Perkins. a Demo- /
cratic gain Of 100 per cent" The Demo- /
Gratis yelled voclfcrousiy. Then the Il
speaker proceeded: Last year. twelve Il
Republicans, one Democrat: this year, /
eleven Republicans two Democrats.
Ysaye. the violinst. Is a shy and quiet
man orrpuf when ruffIef or annOved