The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1904-06-05
COMMENTS ON MEN AND
MATTERS OF THE WORLD

1 ideas of vacation recently pro-
Wy mulgated by the Hon. Russell
Sage have already created much
discussion in the country. Certain cartoon
lists are inclined to think that the finan-
cier once tried a vacation, despite his as
sertion to the contrary, and had such
woeful experience that he was cured for
ever after, but the main objection to a
vacation seems to be the expense entai1ed
Uncle Russell shows that not only will
money be spent but time and energy that
could be better devoted to the pursuit of
wealth or lofty station in life, which are
not synonymous. But there is no reason
why Mr. Sage should anathematize the
vacation as absurd, anomalous and alto
gether useless. Some very good men in
the past and present have contracted the
vacation habit without apparent diminu-
ton in fame and honor. Grover Cleveland
does not disdain a day off now and then,
and even strenuous Teddy Roosevelt
takes what he calls vacation In sum-
mer. In fact, the average man who does
not take holiday every year is missing
a big time, and as happiness is more to
be sought after than many ducats. much
fine gold and linen, let the vacation habit
spread abroad. Too much holiday is in
deed a dangerous thing, but a little is
beneficial.
At rare intervals a citizen is folded up
in a folding bed and the old fear of these
uncanny resting places is forthwith re-
vived. The average folding bed is far
nicer to look at than to sleep in, and for
somnolent purposes 1t is hard to see just
wherein 1t Is useful If furniture manu-
facturers could be induced to change all
the folding beds into wardrobes by leaving
out the springs and mattresses then they
would be both useful and ornamental, but
as things now stand, it is only the most
confirmed fiat dweller who will submit to
the punishment of sleeping in folding
bed May they all perish in the land and
be superseded by book casesl
Miss Ethel Barrymore did not make a
success of Cynthia in London. While
the English critics bowed in admiration
before her winsome personality and girl
ish ways, they could not wax enthusiast
tic over her play, and it will soon be
withdrawn by Charles Frohman. Miss
Barrymore will return to this country and
open her season in San Francisco. The
best thing she did during the past sea-
son was cousin Kate
That babies are cheap in America has
just been demonstrated by a wealthy Ha-
waiian planter who came to this country
in search of one for his home. Just six
hours after his want advertisement was
inserted in the papers the goods were de-
livered. he paid the modest sum of 500
and departed. Just 500 for a baby! That
would not buy fuel enough for a kero-
sene car and would not begin to pay the
doctors bill of pet poodle Of society
for one month. The average man of
fashion would find difficulty in dressing
himself with such a paltry sum but babies
can be had for that and under a guaran-
tee. One hates TO think that the planter
was offered anything at a lower figure.
and how can President Roosevelt talk
about race suicide when a baby can be
bought for 500!
A great many questionable stories have
been made public since the fishing sea-
son began but the premier effort in this
line and the bright particular star in the
galaxy OF fishermen's fabrications has
just been launched upon an unsuspectng
public by New Jersey man who claims
to have heifer that catches fish as a
pastime. This COW stands on the bank
of a stream and when she sees fish she
thrusts her head under the water and
catches him in her mouth. New Jersey is
famous for her ability to produce freaks
but she has surpassed herself with the
fishing COW. 1t is to be supposed that
this talented bovine finds 1t rather duh
in the winter when she cannot indulge in
her chosen sport but she probably whites
away the time in golf until the ice begins
to melt.
The pcnicker is abroad in the land. At
almost any time of the day or night 1t is
possible to see this deluded individual
fastening out to some suburban resort I'M
der the III ression that he is going to
have a GO ) time. At bottom the picnic
is capable of affording pleasure Its prin-
ciples are all right, but unfortunately it
seldom pans out well. II there were no
rain, no ants. no mosquitoes. no heavy
baskets to carry. no youngsters to get into
trouble, no water to fall into. no cars to
catch. no swings to break and no snakes
to bite, the average picnic would afford a
glad, hilarious time for its participants,
but picnics have way of getting poor
man-especially married man--into all
kinds of trouble. Perhaps the best way to
enjoy picnic is to anticipate it for weeks
ahead of time and then decide not to go.
Just why cold ham and hard boiled eggs.
with heat, dirt and ants for accompani-
ment, is more to be preferred than
decent meal served in cool dining room