The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-07-17


At last, when it came to his turn.
the attendant reached for him, and
he trembled. For a moment he was
going to cry out that he would
rather not meet the cook. Ru+
then he thought of the admira-
ton that would be accorded to him
by the submarine cable and the STIR
geon and the Goldfish and the turtle
so he kept his mouth shut. Still he
was somewhat relieved when the mar,
Withdrew his hand and said, mo, I've
got enough: These will be enough
to go. to the cook for the mayon-
naise."
At these last words envy seized the
inqulsitive lobster. He scrambled
over the edge OF the platter and went
plump! into the steaming water.
In a moment he had a bright scar
let court dress on But he didn't
know it, for he was dead-dead as a
boiled lobster, which is dead, indeed
And the attendant never noticed it
either. So the inquisitive lobster boil
ed and boiled, until finally, long after
the great lobster mayonnaise had
been prepared by the famous cook
and eaten by the cooks loving sub
Jects, a kitchen scullion lifted the
caldrron from the fire and emptied it
on the beach. He never noticed the
bright red lobster in it, either. So
Wien the water ran down into the
sea, 1t carried the poor, gayly-dressed
corpse with it; and presently the tide
began to run and it took the red
lobster and bore him out and out.
The submarine cable and the turtle
and the Goldfish and the sturgeon were
sitting together again, talking.
I'm glad the lobster has gone,'
said the sturgeon HE was a sarcas-
tic person, and | think there is not
the slightest doubt that he has gone
wrong"
He always said that he wished to
travel and write book. He would
be fine one to travel, with his back
ward mode of goingW said the turtle.
1 guess the only travelling he will
ever do will be to travel from one
piece of food to the other"
Yes" said the submarine cable,
you are right. HOLSTERS are so in
significant in the scale of creation
that | have never yet condescended
to telegraph anything about them.
know full we'll that | should break
in mid-ocean if were to try"
Just then the boiled red lobster
came swirling along with the tide and
settled right down, Just as if he were
alive, alongside of the cable.
MY dear sir!" said the Goldfish at
once, feeling that the rich dress must
mean prosperity, what fine coat
you have on"
RITt IF cOurce +ba -aJ foL4. IL
not answer word. SO the Goldfish
and the turtle and the sturgeon pad
died off in huff and decided never
to return to the neighborhood of the
vain and naughty red lobster. The
submarine cable was deeply impressed
by the bright suit, but thought it was
wisest to be patronizing, so it drawled
in its most ar1stocratic tone:
Il was just saying to our friends
that no doubt | would break if |
tried to telegraph anything about such
a subject as Holsters But your red
coat almost makes me wish to do it.
How did you get such a beautiful
suit?"
Of course the poor dead lobster
never answered. And the submarine
cable was just preparing to say some
thing pettish, when it had to tele-
graph like anything. And the mes
sage that came pouring into it read:
Tonight, at the grand hotel on
the sea, the Lord of Fitz and the
Right Honorable Marquis of Nitz and
Senator Stabber and Congressman
Gasser all suffered violently after din
ner, and were in danger of death for
several hours. The physicians be-
lieve that their illness was due to
lobster mayonnaise which was served
during the dinner"
This makes me angry enough to
burst" said the submarine cable. ITO
think that | am expected to carry this
humiliating message with that inso-
lent red lobster sitting right beside
mel"
But the submarine cable did not
burst. And the red lobster sat there
forever and ever in the bright, deep
green sea, and never said a word
So that is how it happened that no
lobster has yet written a book to tell
how he met the cook.
JULIUS MULLER.