davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
Consumption of Tobacco.

The total receipts from tobacco
from all sources were $44,655,8OS.75
for the fiscal year, against $43,514.-
S1O.24 for the fiscal year 19O2-19O3, or
an increase Of $1,140,99851. This in.
crease is participated in by all
branches OF trade, except cigar manu-
faeture-here we see a decrease of
$236,756.01. AS cigar manufacturing
shows the worst condition. so tobacco
manufacture shows the best condi-
tion. Receipts for this branch of the
trade exceeded the receipts for the
previous fiscal year by $1,O77, ,790.O2.
The result of the year as whole is
satisfactory. In the f1uctuation of
business from year to year a uniform
ly good condition in all lines can not
be expected. The output of manufac-
tured tobacco for the fiscal year is
larger than during any previous year,
and aggregates the enormous amount
of 32S,650,710 pounds.-Western To-
bacco Journal
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
HuMoR in TEX F'l CLERGY.
Amusing Remarks Which Mere Most
E#55* T3 Seriously Intended.

Amusing Remarks which Were Most
/ Seriously Intended.
Part of the humor which one occa-
sionally meets with, even in the Sc
date inclosure of the pulpit, is due to
the queer texts which are sometimes
often unconsciously- chosen by
preachers. No doubt there are many
stories told, under this head which
owe their origin not to actual fact SO
much as to the invention of the wag.
For example, a minister on the Sun
day before his marriage is said to
have chosen as his text, "And he went
on his way rejoicing" and on the Sun
day after his honeymoon to have elo-
quently discoursed on the words, "Re7
member my bonds" r.. .
These instances are, probably, apo
cryphal, but the following are true
and have all come within the expert
ence of the writer It was in the
north of England that the first incl
dent happened. It was a country
church where oil lamps were used in
stead of gas. One night in the late
summer when the lamps had not yet
been resumed after the long days it
got suddenly overcast and before the
sermon it was deemed necessary to
light the pulpit lamp. During the
hymn the old sexton repaired to the
pulpit, and, having cleaned the glass
chimney with duster, lit it up, but
only feeble light struggled through.
And then the clergyman took his text,
which was this: And now we see
through glass darkly"
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
Dundonaid a Successful Man.

Lord Dundonald, who has been dis
missed by the Canadian government
from his position as head of the do
minion militia because he would not
permit politicians to interfere with
him, is utterly unlike the Conventional
army officer He looks more like a
dreamer than a man of action-a
handsome man with rather pale COM
plexio1, dark curly hair, del1cately cut
features and exquisitely modulated
voice. BY turns he has been inventor,
saVant, keen sportsman, inguist, coun-
try squire and soldier, and has been
conspicuously successful in each role.
He has q mind Of incessant activity
and altogether is one Of those spirits
who are bound to come into collision
with fate. authorities and conventions.
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
LORE ] ! j ll1 Or THE, BIBLE
A REFERENCE BOOK IN THE
WASHINGTON PUBLIC LIBRARY.
Az Information in, Any Way Bearing
on the Scriptures Can Be Found on
the Shelves of the Institution at
the National Capital. :

IL may be an interesting fact to
some people that the Bible is one Of
Tue reference books in the Washing
ION public library, that four shelves
are hlled with an excellent assortment
Oh biblical literature, and that every
saturday one or more ministers Of the
gospel seek this place Of books to look
up references for the sermons with
"nich they instruct the public from
tnelr pulpits on Sunday morning.
information concerning the Bible is
ABOUT as limited as can be. Probably
very few persons, if told that the IL
Drary contains the three versions of
,he Bible" would be able to say what
tnese three versions are. In point Of
TACT they are the Douay, the King
James, and the American version.
Ever since the events that made
olollcal history occurred have &C.
counts OF these same been written.
And as civilization spread and gave
rise to new people speaking new
tongues, these earlier accounts were
AACo O1uS1S IOuSu6S 10
meet human needs.
: IN. the first place, there is in the
library book which contains all the
English translations from the original
GTeek text. The book is called the
English Hexapla. The Greek text oc-
cuples the upper part of the page and
the six translations are side by side
IN columns underneath. These trans
latlcns are in the Wiclif, published in
1871; the Tyndall, in 1884; the Gran
mer, 1889; the Geneva, 1857; the
Rheens 1882, and the authorized YER
sion, lel1.
What is called the Douay version
Is made up of the New Testament,
punished in Rheims in 1882, and of
the Old Testament of the Douay YER
sion, published in 600 A. D. This is
the Bible of the Catholics. 1t was
published with the appreciation of
Cardinal Gibbons by the great Catho-
Tic publishers, the John Murphy com
pany. New York. The title-page bears
the Inscription: printers to the holy
see
When the early translations of the
Bible were being made, history was
unfolding itself at a rapid rate in the
British empire. Much of the work
was done by Protestants, who were
driven into exile for their religious be-
nefs. The Geneva translation was the
outcome of such an exile.
After Henry Wits stand against
the Pope, the cause of Catholicism as
the established religion was a lost
one. but it was not until later, dur
ing the reign of King James, that
the authorized version of 1911 was
translated for use in the Church of
England.
The American version is the King
James version revised, annotated and
brought up to date
Other books of reference here are
the Cyclopedias of Biblical Literature,
the Jewish Cyclopedia, commentaries
of various sorts and concordances. A
Catholic dictionary contains a descrip-
ton of the doctrines and rites of this
church, and was published in Eng
land.-Washington Post.
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
Too Truthful Younuster.

In city public school, Miss H,
who is somewhat beyond her teens.
was exercising a class of small bows
in spelling and defining. The word
.":bedlamite'' was correctly spelled, but
one after another failed to give it's
meaning. Miss f., becoming i'm
patient and wishing to help them by
suggestion, asked in vexed tone:
what am I now?"
A youngster instantly replied:
please. ma'am, an old maid!''
Perhaps it is needless to add that
Miss H. gave still more dramatic
illustration of the required definition.
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
1 MAKING OF FINE: LAC ES.S
One Case Where American Genius e
n mi .sS s sfS Still at auIt. s& s51f PIT

4 n s 'sSS Still at { auIt.
H Fine laces,'' said w. W. Chace,
constitute one of the most readily
salable classes of merchandise which
is imported to this country, and it is
a source of wonder that American
genius has not devised some way in
which to meet this demand with do
nestle article which will serve the
same purpose and can be sold at
something like the same price. -,
But it has not" he continued. I'VE
have had many machines invented,
but the nearest we can come is to
manufacture a. type of lace which is
naturally cheap and does not in any
sense approach it's handmade foreign
rival. OF course, American women
could be taught in time to knit such
fine fabrics as their sisters do in Ire
land, England, France, Germany and
Spain; but we in this country are too
busy making money to waste time in
that way.
Il have Travelled all over Europe,
and the most interesting method OF
making lace over there that I came
across was at Plauen, Germany. It is
woven on kind of boiling cloth made
OF fine silk, and after the pattern is
completed a certain acid, parts of
which are kept secret, is applied and
the boiling cloth eaten away, leaving
only the lace. They also have a way
OF altering the strength of the acid
IN order to give the lace a rich, old
color. louisville Herald.
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26

the front of the machine winked at
Dolly and two shorter winks followed.
Back of. the majors shiny pate the
joss sticks danced like freflies, eager
to nestle back into the soft coils of
hair from which they had just been
snatched.
I'm going. up to the corner for a
Soda announced Dolly. Want to
come, auntie?"
Il guess III have vichy," grunt-
ed the major, distrustful of walks with
Carstairs about; and the three strolled
slowly toward the corner drug store
under the leafy arch of trees.
Halfway up the street the two glar-
ing eyes of an automobile flashed
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
Still Failed to See.

I'D like to see a man kiss met"
she said with considerable spirit.
"Well,'' he replied thoughtfully, "as
spectacle think you would find it
disappointing. The value of kiss
does not lie in the looks of it, you
know. However, if you feel that way
about it, I would suggest that you
stand over here and look in the mir
ror. There, that's just it,
You hOrrid thing!" she exclaimed
just about half a minute later.
Afterward she confessed to her dear
est friend that she was so preoccu-
pied that even then she did not see
anyone kiss her; but she was pretty
well convinced in her own mind that
some one did.-New York Tribune.
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
complimenting the Bishop.

1t was noon hour and quite num-
ber of workmen had dropped into the
Subway tavern. He was a Hibernian,
antique, grizzled, scanned, and warped
with age, but he shifted his dinner
pail with certain sprightliness as
he stopped on the way out to sight his
clay. He eyed the clerk. Il hod a
dhrink," he prefaced with dignity.
me name is Dinnis Mulcahy. l have
tn distinction av bein' tn Oldest
laborin' man in New York I am 81
years av age. Ye may tell tn bishop
) was in. an that his liquor is virry
ixcellent. Good-day. New York Sun.
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
/Z4E

HN II HERINz2

Dolly was dusting Cupid in the win
dow, and to Carstairs anything Dolly
did was of interest, especially now
that Major Ruthven had declared that
there should be no communication be-
tween these two young people.
Such an edict is difficult of enforce
nent when the young people lived just
opposite each other, but the major
found a most efficient ally in his sis
ter Lydia.
She had been disappointed in her
first and only love affair, and was out
Of patience with lovers generally and
with Frank Carstairs in particular, for
the elder Carstairs' lack of apprecia-
tion of Lydia's charms had sent him
elsewhere to look for a life-mate and
so had confirmed Lydia's spinster-
hood.
The majors objection to Franks
suit took more practical ground.
Frank, as campaign manager for his
best friend and partner, had defeated
the majors candidate for the state
legislature and incidentally had won
control of the party in his district, an
advantage not to be despised by
rising young lawyer, even though he
be possessed of Independent fortune
and the love Of Dolly Ruthven.
Just now Frank watched Dolly
gloomily. He had tried in every way
to get word to her since on the night
Of the primaries the major had
I'll III fo1
He was certain she did not share
her fathers wrath, but to gain her
side, with Miss Lydia as dragon, was
a matter beyond his shrewdness.
He watched her idly as she luttered
the dainty duster about the plaster
cast, and wondered if he might have
been mistaken in his belief that sh
great pains apparently to call atten-
tion to the cast, and Cupid's back was
turned to him.
Suddenly he found that the signifi-
canoe lay in the busting rather thar
the white figure. First the duster
fitted down one shoulder of the Cupid,
then the other. Next there was an
other dab down the first side, followed
by two more and then one. If he had
been out with the militia signal corps
this would have been his call, "F c."
Just for fun, he would water the
plants in the window-and reply.
With the tiny watering can he
sprinkled one side Of geranium. and
then twice swung the sprinkler on the
other side; that was 3D." The "
was three more dots on the same side
and one on the other. Like a flash
came fresh flourishes of the duster,
and he had Dolly's 20. X
Twenty minutes later Frank went
downtown with head erect, and when
ne met Major Ruthven he added fur
ther to his offences by passing that
doughty veteran with a broad grin.
The majors frown was smoothe,l
away only when Miss Lydia assured
him that Dolly had been in her own
room all the morning.
That evening Franks big red auto
mobile stood painting in front of the
house across the way. while Dolly,
carefully chaperoned by her father
and aunt, took the air on the brown
stone steps.
The darkness had already fallen
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
Show Humane Spirit.

From Bombay presidency native
petition has been forwarded to the
government of India praying that the
sale Of feathered caps, ETC., through.
out British India may be prohibited
sty law, on account Of the cruelty in.
volved. ..>s- i II, s..:
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
Didn't Have it, Anyway.

Didn't Have it, Anyway.
Servant (returned from an errand),
Please, ma'am couldn't get it.,
Mistress-Get what?- =. ~
Servant They said they didn't
keep it, ma'am. =
Mlstress-Keep what?
Servant-What you told me to
fetch, ma'am.
Mlstress-What wasa that?
Servant-Dunno, ma'am-1 forget
STRAY Stories.
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
EIIicott City's Reputation.

Fair Damsel-Good-by, mama. I'm
just going to take car ride out to
Ellicott City with Charley. Well be
back in couple of hours.
Wise Mother-All right, Bessie, my
hands are all in the dough now, so
I'll wait till you come back to give
you my blessing. What preacher are
you going to have?-Baltimore Amer.
ican.
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26

who is at the telephone?"
"Your wife, sir"
What does she want?'
''The only word I can understand is
:numskull.'"
LET me come there. She prob.
ably wants to talk with me"-Topeka
State Journal.
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
My Hope.

am not brave,
But fear has made me so.
And dread lest I forego
The honor that you gave.
l am not wise,
But you loved. wisdom So
That what I did not know
learnt it in your eyes.
I am not true
But you have trusted so
That faithfully go
Lest I be false to you.
If heaven I win,
I can no virtue show,
But that you loved me so.
Will they not let me in?
Ethel Clifford in Songs of Dreams. "
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
Financial Strinoencv-

Il was in a little friendly poker
game yesterday afternoon began
young Sportleigh, ''and l regret to say
am =
"sorry I can't oblige you, oil man."
interrupted his friend Goodwin, !"but
attended church social last night"
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
BIiSsful Ignorance.

What is the prevailing cult in
Cleveland now?" asked the Cincinnati
girl.
Really, can't say" replied the
maid from the village by the lake.
''As far as l know we haven't had an
epidemic of any kind for years."
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
Temporarily Closed for Repairs.

Temporarily Closed for Repairs.
McJlgger-Small told Bigger yester-
day that he was a crook; said he
knew he was a thief because Bigger
couldn't look him in the eye.
Thingumbob-That's true too.
McJigger-Yes, but it's also true
that Small can't look himself in tho
eye this morning.
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
Not PRESSING,

"Ah!" he cried, now that we're en-
gagged, let me press you to my heart
in--- - '--- .-.... -, -.
q Don't lose yourself said the sum
mer girl, pushing him away. This is
no pressing engagement q q s, H.
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
Closed Season,

Yeast-I see a dispatch from Ma
lone, N. Y, says a man has already
been shot who was mistaken for a
deer"
Crimsonbeak-Why, I thought the
law wouldn't allow a man to shoot
another man for deer, yet?
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
Comparino Notes.

Comparing Notes.
What do you do with your money!"
asked the married man.
I'm saving it up to get married."
replied the bachelor. "What do you
do with yours?''
: I'm saving it up to get DIVORCE
answered the married man.
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
Willing to Obliqe.

Willing to ObIIge.
"No malaria about here, suppose"
said the prospective summer boarder.
"NGt enny," replied the rural land
lord. we amt never had no call fer
it; but eff thar's emmy tew be had
deown tew tn village I reckon ez
heow we'll git it fer you.''
The Cook County herald., 1904-11-26
Dolly was dustinq Cupid,

Dolly was dustlng Cupid.
and in her hair the red tips of burn
Ing joss sticks gave signs that she
was determined that the mosquitoes
should not annoy her.
The major gave a grunt as Frank
ran down the steps, and Dolly bright
ened up. Instead of climbing into the
seat and steering off, Frank stood in
front Of the machine, idly swinging
his cap. g.
Presently one Of the big lanterns on
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1904-10-01
q Wonderful Discovery

This is the age of research and experiment.
when all nature. so 10 speak, lie ransacked by
the scientific for the comfort and happiness of
man. Science has indeed made giant strides
during the vest century, and among the by no
means lea sc i'm Observation-Disclosures in medicine
nnquestionably one OF the most genuine and
reliable Patent Medicines ever introduced and
hes, we understand, been used in the Conti-
mental Hospitals by Ricord, Rostsn. Jobert.
Yelpeau, Maisonneuve, the well-known Chas,
nafgnAc, and indeed by all those who are re-
Earded authorities in such matters, inclu d.
Ing the celebrated Lallemand, and Roux. by
whom il was some time since uniformly adopt
ed. and that il is worthy the attention of Those
who require such a remedy we think there is
no doubt. From the time or Aristotle down.
wards, a potent agent in the removal of these
diseases has (like the famed philosophers
stonel been the object of search of some hope
fal, generous minds; and far beyond the mere
power--if such could ever have been discover.
ed--of transmitting the baser metals into gold
II surely the discovery of g remedy so potent as
e1ectually, speedily and safely to expel from
the system the poisons of acquired or inherited
faint or trace behind. Such is The New French
Remedy rherapien, which may certainly rank
with, If not take precedence Of many of the
discoveries of our day, about which no little
OsteE Ia ton and noise have been made, and the
extenssye and ever-increasing demand that has
been created for this medicine wherever in
9s0duced appears to prove that it is destined to
cast into oblivion all those questionable RENE
dies that were formerly the sole reliance of
medical men. Therapion may be obtained
In England, direct from the proprietor and of
the principal Chemists and Merchants through
eat the Colonies, India, China. Japan, &c.
diamond Fields Advertiser. Kimberley.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1904-10-01
Rose Equal to the Emergency.

AS an old colored preacher who hac
been conducting a revival meeting was
reaching the end of his series, he ap-
lpeared before the congregation one night
and spoke thus:
Brethren and sistren, I come befo
you all wholly unprepared with my text
| | hab been preachin' all so'ts of things,
and to show the brethren and sistren
that | have not said all that [ know, /
will ask that some membah of this con-
gregat1on suggest subject and | will
preach about it to YOU"
For several minutes there was an en-
barrassing Silence while the minister
iscowled over the top of his glasses, wait
ing Tor some one to propose topic.
No one seemed anxious to take ad-
a little fellow in the back part of the
church yelled out, Fills. There was a
smoker as the preacher cleared his voice
and said;
Pills. I have been requested by some
rnembah OF dis congregation to discourse
befo' you all on pills Now, brethren
and sistren, | am not familiar wild the
ways of medicine. for am a preacher
man, but as / said | would talk on any
subject that was proposed, pills will be
my text. Now. 10 begin with, there are
quinine pills, calonel pills, big pills and
little pills and thousand kind of other
pills what the doctor do prescribe when
the flesh am sick. But | propose to talk
to you about de kind Of medicine what
de soul needs when it am sick
gospils indianapolis News.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1904-10-01

beginnings OF caucus combinations.
finally completed under the banner of
kuInalae's Solid Thirteen, which in
Guided no ideas Of Republicanism at
all no regard for public politics OF
any value and no principles except loot
ing the treasury by legislative session
expense and other schemes and eleyat-
ing one another TO positions of dignity.
The Republican success. was fall
ure and the legislature was worse IN
some respects than its predecessor. The
lesson went home to the public,
bur some of the party managers forgot
it. They forgot that what the great
bulk of the voters were demanding this
year above all was a good. reliable
legislative ticket. The voters wanted
men they could depend upon,-and
the conventions gave them Jas. Shaw,
Solomon Mahelona, Aylett of the
Solid Thirteen. Long of the Kapiolanl
Estate. After that it was no use to
talk of party loyalty and regular
ity." The Republican party was placed
in danger of the popular protest which
always destroys parties VINO fall below
standard in their nominees If such
parties were not so destroyed in the
end, American municipal government
would be a worse failure than it is.
Every campaign sees parties which
have become below standard buried
under a deluge of opposition votes. on
ly to struggle slowly up again by be-
coming purified and again deserving
public support. The danger at once
appeared before the Republican party
here
Viewed in this light the present diff
Nc.
are not a misfortune to the party.
They are its salvation. Instead of being
a source of qualification to the enemy,
they are, rightly considered, exactly
the contrary. They are advertising to
the voters as nothing else could adj
vertise it, the fact that the Republican
party will not allow itself to be used
to elect grafters and incompetents to
office. 1t is happy to notice that even
the most earnest of the sticklers for
support of any old thing that a con-
vention happens to name, have begun
at last to see at least some of the UNI
fitness of the men thoughtlessly put up.
Perhaps a party campaign of edu-
cation" may be needed to show them
some more of the unfitness.-but the
lessons if needed are forthcoming. Re-
publicans are doing little house,
cleaning just now. When the cleaning
has been done and the worst places
properly treated with disinfectant, the
public may accept an invitation to
enter. But the cleaning must be tho
rough.
One thing is now clear to all, as it
was clear to some when the conven-
tions met and adjourned. 1t is that
the unfit men will not receive the votes
of the intelligent men of the party,
simply because the label Republican has
been given them. This The Star stated
several times before the conventions
met. It warned the delegates that Io-
nolulu was not a community ito be
led by the nose by any political organ
ization'' and declared that the only
way to control the intelligent, indie
pendent vote was TO put up good men.
The lesson, then unheeded, is being
learned now. If it is learned thoroughly
enough, there will be little comfort for
the Democrats or Home Rulers in
the Oahu returns
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1904-10-01

IT Is DANGEROUS to neglect a
cold. Pneumonia is one of the most
dangerous and fatal diseases. 1t always
results from cold. Chamberlain s
Cough Remedy will quickly cure cold
and perhaps prevent an attack of
pneumonia. 1t is in fact made espe-
cially for that ailment and has become
famous for it's cures over a large part
of the civilized world. 1t counteracts
any tendency of cold toward pneumo-
MIA Can you afford to neglect your
cold when so reliable remedy can be
had for trif1e? For sale by all deal
ers. Benson, Smith & Co., Ltd, Agents
for Hawaii.