Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1904-05-28
WHEN OTHERS FAILED

There was very large and joyous we'd
ding party at the station when / took the
train for the west at Pittsburg one after
noon a few weeks ago." said travelling
official of the government. 1.-THE crowd of
merry-making rice throwers was SO dense
outside of the parlor car which the bride
and groom were about to take that had
hard work to make my way through to the
car steps. finally squeezed through, how
ever. and then stood on the vestibuled
platform of my car to watch the perform
ance Of the wedding party when the All
aboard shout Glove the air.
THE conductor of the train was just
clearing his throat to give the warning
signal when a mischievous-eyed young fel.
low forced his way through the party i'm
mediately surrounding the bride and groom.
He took hold of a hand of each OF them as
II about to make q graceful little speech to
them. They permitted their hands to rest
trustfully in his and gazed at ham inquir-
fngiy. Grasping their two hands with his
left hand, he did q little mysterious FUN
bling in the tail pocket OF his frock coat,
brought that hand out, and quickly carried
1t to the Joined hands OF the puzzled
looking bride and groom. There was a
sharp little click.
and the bride and groom had to do the best
they could to scramble on board their
car. 1t isn't easy to scramble on board a
car when you're securely handcuffed to an
other person. especially when you're not
used to handouts. And the young chap
with the mischievous eyes had handcuffed
that bridal couple together just as neat as
wax
There was great shout from the. we'd
ding party when they saw the situation, and
they were still yelling hilariously when the
train slowly pulled out. The bridal couple,
standing on the vestibuled platform of the
parlor car, looked at each other discOnso-
lately. There was a gleam of wrath in the
groom's eyes, and the corners Of his wife's
. mouth were drawn down in the first pout
OF her married life.
"Clalnped together that way, the young
couple turned from the platform and walk
ed into the parlor car. the groom ahead, his
right wrist securely locked to the left wrist
of his pretty little wife, and pulling her af-
ter him. They sank into the first two vacant
chairs they came to, their arms forming a
bridge between the chairs. Anybody could
see that they weren't going to be able to Sit
that way very long-the position would be
too tiresome, with their arms stretched out
In that way. They saw it themselves before
they had been n their chairs for two min
utes, and then they got up looking very
much cnagrfned. and walked to the rear to
one OF the day coaches, where they sat
down with more comfort, the groom resting
his ironed wrist in his wifes lap. felt
sorry for them, but didn't feel like butting
in-some newly-wed young couples are pc
culiar. Anyhow, I didn't have any keys
with me with " hich I thought there might
be a chance of unlocking the handouts. So
/ took a seat little way back from the
steel-Joined couple. and waited to see what
was going to happen.
1.-The conductor entered the car present
ly and demanded all tickets When he came
to the groom. tho young man smiled at him
in chalky sort of way.
My tickets he said to the conductor.
are in my right-hand trousers pocket.
Law tn mi that nOckpt and
get them yourself and he stood up, his
wife rising sheepishly with him.
The onductor darted a surprised look at
the handouts, and then he involuntarily
looked about the car for somebody who
might lock like detective or a keeper. The
groom caught that glancing around Of the
conductors.
"'You needn't worry he said, with the
distinctness of speech Of a sore man. to the
conductor. We don't happen to be crooks,
nor insane people, either, and so you need
not expect to find detective or keeper in
charge of US. We were married in Pitts
burg one hour ago. and, just as we were
about to get on board this train, an Internal
fathead friend of ours put us in this mis-
cradle predicament by Handwriting US to-
gether. He regarded that. no doubt, as
Something humorous l have parlor car
seats but 1 can't use them as long as We
are tied together in this way. for we don't
want to have our arms drop or before We
reach our destination
The conductor smiled at first and then
looked sympathetic. He reached into the
disghsted groom's pocket and got out the
railroad tickets, which were neatly tucked
away in an envelope. punched them, and
returned them to the trousers pocket,
whereupon the groom and his bride re-
sumed their seats
I'm be back directly. said the con-
ductor, cheeringly, to the groom. and see
If can't undo you two young folks
when he had finished taking up tine
tickets of the train the conductor return
ed to where the newly wed pair were
seated and began to tinker with the hand
cuff of the young man with all of the keys
that he had on his key ring. But 1t was
no use. The keys wouldn't come anywhere
near doing the trick. for 1t takes just a
certain sort of contraption to unlock a
handcuff.
1.-The brakeman swung along while The
conductor was fooling with the grooms
handcuff. and he stopped to look the pro-
ceedings over. Then he began to tinker
with the handcuff lock with the small
blade of his penknife. No go.
by this time word of the predicament Of
the young couple had passed all through
the train. and the helpful ones began to
appear in sets of fours whisky drum
mer did the best he knew how to unlock
the groom's handcun with first, cork
screw. and. when that fizzied out. with a
fountain pen, which he carefully washed
out for the purpose. Nothing doing with
the fountain pen, either.
THE whisky drummer retired In favor of
d HuOuit-aSeQ man VINO approached the Job
with a great deal of reassiiring confidence
His implement was pointed nail file. Said
he'd seen handcuff unlocked once, at a
crooks congress in a dime museum or some
such place, with pointed nail file. He got
himself all het up so to speak, poking
away at the lock with the nail file. and then
he had to take rest and mop his fore
head.
He was still pottering away when a
bullet-headed chap. with a four days
growth of beard, slouched in from the
smoking car. He looked enough like the
comic papers pictures of the craftsman
with the protruding jaw to be one Of Them
and he wore red bandanna handkerchief
around his neck and had little cap pulled
over his outstanding left ear. He shambled
over to where the groom sat next to his
sad little wife, who was gazing mournfully
out of the window all of this time.
Hey. let's take peek at them cuffs,
boz said the buliet-headed chap to the
groom who gave upward glance of
some resentment at the familiarity. I've
seen some O. them pulse-warmers that's
easy
s'They all made room for him. and he
picked up the groom's immaculate hand
In his grimy paw and took a shrewd look
at the style of the handcuf. Then he dug
into one of his rear trousers pockets and
brought something out. There were lot of