The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1904-02-27
HONORS WERE EVEN.
How Mayor Osborn and colone! Coffin
Fixed Up Matters.
Especial to News and observer.)

Greensboro NJ c., Feb. 26.-Honors
are even between Mayor W. II. Osborn,
ard the nexa biggest man in town, the
Southern freight agent William e. Coffin.
The two Williams, besides possessing a
marked individuality of their own. have
another bond in common, that of OLE
agipousness, which also stands for
abounding good nature and good humor.
Tie foregoing Will shed some light or
the following:
| Act /. Scene-Curbstone Main st:
| Col. Osborn: Look a-here Coffin, your
railroad is about to break me up. /
| have had six or seven mules nearly
sl1nt to death, at different times in the
| last six months travelling from Kentucky
on your trains, and I've got 20 have
scme pay for it; and only last week,
in bringing highly priced heir
loom, an Old family mahogany side-board
which belonged to my father, with all
trenl little revolving things in one part
where he had his decanters ard things
for company. Your road broke the large
heavy marble slab, and mighty near
Iruired me, and I've got to have some
pay for that too. l can't stand it, and
I'm not going to-
Col. Coffin: Now I'm very glad you
have come to me about that, instead OF
going to some shyster lawyer and bringing
suit against the road. I'll tell you what
Ito do. You just make out your bills
lin each case, itemizing each as a separ-
ale claim and give them to me, and
III send them on and have them passed
on by the board of directors, and you'll
get satisfaction without any fuss or hard
feeling.
Act II. Scene-Twelve months later.
Southern Freight Office:
Mayor Osborn: Look a-here Coffin,
dent you remember complimenting me
about a year ago, on not bringing suit
for damages on them mules and that
side-board and telling me to make out
the claims and you would send them
on to the board of directors?"
Col Coffin: II do remember it. remem-
Der there>werG about seventeen calims and
they amounted to about $780,"
Mayor Osborn: well, what want
to know is: why the Il don't set, my
money!"
Col. Coffin: "Well the truth
is everyone of them claims was dis-al-
low ed, and l just hated to tell you of
it, then forgot it,
Act ILL., One year later. CUrbstone,
Mann Street Greensboro:
Mayor Osborn: Look a-here Cgfin
l am in luck. l had 26 bags of peas
shipped from Wilson last week. Ny
oyerseer hauled them out to the farm
ard brought me back bag of the finest
coffee / ever tasted A whole great big
bag. The Keely boys are pratsing IL
nightly. Come around tonight and try
It.. l wrote to Winston to see if any
mistake had been made there, but there
wasn't and I'm in a whole bag of COT
fee, worth every cent of forty cents a
| pound
/ Col Coffin: lord bless my life. I've
been looking for that coffee ten daysS
It. Belonged in Charlotte, and the railroad
as well as the consignor and ccnsignee
have been raising-about it. Won't
you send it around to the freight depot
| for mc?"
Mayor osborn--"No, won't do no
such thing
Col. coffin-"well, I'll send around
after it."
Mayor Osborn-''Thats all right You
can send after it, but you won't get
it,
Col. Coffin--"Wont get it! Why what's
the matter with you?"
Mayor Osborn GU see 1t S THIS way.
1 am manager of the Keely Institute.
1t is incorporated and run by a board of
directors. You put in your claim for the
coffee. and when the board meets, I'll
present it."
Col. Coffin-''When does your board
meet?''
Mayor Osborn-"Once a year"
Col. Coffin-''When Will it's next meet
ing come off,
Mayor Osborn-''Well, it held it's reg
liar annual meeting yesterday, and the
next one will be a year from then, and
if you will file your claim. and not go
around fooling with shyster lawyers
bringing lawsuits, and the claim is not
dis-allowed, it will no doubt be paid"
| Honors thus being even between Col
VII am Osborn and Col. William Coffin,
there was a mighty shaking of jovial
| flesh, nigh on to six hundred pounds in
bulk But, as is usual freight agent
Ccffin, came out the big end of the
horn he couldn't have squeezed through
any little end-for. Mayor Osborn hadn't
even touched the coffee, Coffin getting
lit sent back before the sun could go
Down on his wrath