The Birmingham age-herald., 1904-08-07
SIMON FORD DISCUSSES
 THE HOTEL IN ENGLAND

Rrom the Washington Times.
 "The habit of serving seventy-fve bad things to eat in seventy-hve separate canary bird baths, regard as a draw back to our country hotels" says Simeon Ford, who has Just returned from a trip through England.
 ''In that respect" he continued, "the interior hotels in England have the ad- vantage over ours. They run more to simplicity They have two or three things they can give you to eat, and they are good things The American in his coun- try hotel wants a bewilering aboundance- a boundless sea of things to eat reach ing to far horizon across the table and breaking in a tumultuous corned-beef- and-cabbage ice-cream-and- -beans-mince- pie surf into his plate.
 "The reason I know this is so Is part ly because country hotel keeper up in New England told me so. It was on a bicycle tour I made down east one time in company with my son. We start ed out from Boston and took in country
 
 try. We were getting we'll on toward physical collapse for want of nourishment and finally thought I would say a word in season to country hotel keeper that might induce him to lead higher life.
 Why Is it, l asked him-'tell me as between man and man-why is it you lavish money in spreading on your table these bounteous repasts of things that ~f n sum in getting one thing. say, that Is fit to eat?
 I've got to do it. he replied. The American people demand it. Cut off his daily supply of garbage and try to mar row him down to things that a civilized human being ought to eat, and the Amer ican citizen would revolt. He'd tear my house down about my ears. I'm not al- together coward, but I'm not taking fool risks either, and know enough not to come between an American citizen and his favorite fodder
 "So there you are," continued MT. Ford. "The American citizen at the country hotel wants mess of victuals, pays for mess of victuals and gets what he pays for, and the country landlord who gives him the messiest mess spread out III lHC BI SdleHl luflDeT or Insect bath tubs Is the man for his money.
 The hotel keeper in England has one great advantage over the American land lord. Matters are simplifled for him be- cause all Englishmen eat the same thing. Explore the seven seas. ransack the con tinents and scoop the atmosphere with dragnet for things to put before an Englishman for breakfast and If he does not take mutton chops he will take ba- con and eggs. You can't do business on that simple basis here at home You've got to cater to the inhabitants of dozens of distinct food zones You've got to have scrappel for the Philadelphia man: you've got to have ham, bacon and spare ribs for the great hog-and-hominy belt: your breakfast table must be spread with dozen different kinds of pie for people or the Massachusetts pic region; dough- nuts Tor the Nutmeg state man-and what Is breakfast to Chicago man without his bottle of beer and dish O. strawber- ry ice cream?
 But there are other advantages which the English country hotel keeper has and he Is generally woman, by the way. There Is the matter of walters and gem eral hotel help. In England, In the coun try, this costs next to nothing Even in the country hotels the walters are now nearly all German or Swiss. They get absolutely nothing from the hotel for their services. They depend on tips for all the money they get. Their main ob- Ject Is to learn the English language. The chambermaid also gets no pay to speak oI-maype 9l month. She, too, looks to ups Tor her money supply. The chamber maids are an institution in the English hotels-a sort of combination of chamber maid and valet. It is luxury we can't