New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1904-02-02
TIE TALK or The DAT.

Judge somervillo. Of the Board OF United States
General Appraisers tells how the late Judge Gray
decided OF the earliest customs classification
cases 20 come before the Supreme Court OF the
United States. The article under consideration
was q preparation Of FISH which had been assessed
for duty a sauce. The inferior courts had given
conflicting opinions TO whether 81 really was
sauce and b. the time the issue reached the dtgni
FED Supreme Court the decisions either way were
voluminous enough TO confuse tho most clear
headed jurist
Judge Gray examined the article. according 20
The Philadelphia Ledger" but could not make
up mis- mind. HIS colleagues we're equally unde-
cided When things came TO q standstill Il
CURED 20 Judge Gray that housewife would
probably be better qualified TO decide matter o.
this kind He took sample Of the article home
10 Mrs Gray.
Nonsense that's no sauce: it's hshr' she said
and the next day the Supreme Court Of the United
States solemniy decided the article was net a
sauce.
Playing safe.--"Look here. sIri You have been
calling on my daughter every night for the past
But / can't AFFORD to get married. sir. and n
call on any other girl. I'm afraid might fan In
love with her."-tSmart Set
Tie popularity OF poker. sometimes called tho
great American game" seems be extending
Much has been heard Of late about standing pat"
holding the age" and similar expressions which
said to belong to the lexicon in which full
bands. and 'threes % a kind 'straights'' and
two pairs" mentioned. Statesmen OF renown
would hardly make use OF such expressions unless
they believed their constituents might be expected
to understand the significance OF these illusions.
SURE CURES
had the toothache once u beat the band.
- II gave me hts all OF month or more.
1t jumped and thump,d until ! couldn't stand
Ia ME me TO the dentists. but my sand
Ana a So shy o 81 dn 5y Jsi a a32St hand sTn
AND pouiticed up my face to stop the pain
And some Of them would hold It for a willis.
But II broke loose asan snd: hoy land!
Il kept ne s9uiTmi9s Cor a month m a6tou';,
Say, Have you noticed how We seem to hate
To yank the messly snags that sive US grief
Tire moral snaRs? We always Want to wait
WE ss ana 59e Syoa STn 6 9' ssr se Of a.
And rub the social ,.s gum with cTe9 9s
We pate, e1 The ugly PAGES NTH b,'s s9d plate
we IN ard fool around to gel things straight.
Auhoueh We know thai plugging doesn't work.
But with the dentist we went make date
AS long as there's a dead sure cure q take
1 reckon that we'd rather have the ache
-tCh;caso News
The College OF the City Of Network Is enlarsing
its use fulness with amazing rapdity So Is
the pressure for admission that President Finley is
compelled to ayk the Board of Estimate and Appor
tionment 10 be more liberal In its appropriations
The Wise Physicisn-Pardon me, ladies. SIN
for you. but don't let that worry you prescribe
that those sitting on my left go to the senco9st and
those on my right TO the ntains.-tFhegende
Blatter
The following paragraph. clipped from The Lon
don Mali Of January Is. is interesting because II
the support which II gives to The Tribune story
OF last Monday that the Steel Trust had ceased
porting tinplste and in consideration for this
kindly deed the welsh tin producers buying
steel OF the American trust:
considerable stir has been created In the Welsh
tnpIate trade by the rumor that 10 Go tons Of
American steel bars due at Swansea, Ilanelly
and Newport.
The Swansea dock officials do not entirely con-
firm this. but that there four vessel>
on the water with consigrmerts OF American bars
It appears. at least. that consignments OF bnlets
and bars making their way into the heart OF
the tin manufacturing district while the ware
houses in Pitsburg piling up with tnplate oris
inaIIy made to send abroad.
A westbrook Gie) teacher asked her pupils one
day IL any OF them knew who Nero was. SAYS an
exchange. The only response came from an urchin
who declared that they sang ABOUT Nero in the
religious music devoted Nero asked the name of
the hymn Nero. NV God. 10 Thee was the con-
fident answer.
Ms Syivius Little. OF Whitman. found her range
/ smoked badly. she took down the stovepipe and
cleaned IT, thinking the trouble was there Next
she thought 20 sweep of the oven top and removed
the covers find owl snugly slowed in the
space blocking the smoke exit. She captured him
and had him for q pet He had come down the
chimney and crspt into the pipe when the Gre was
our.
great deal about his estates broad ssYs- /"
answered Mr. Cumrox Hes like one or two others
n frade bis imaginary estate FOR some Of INV rsai
lestate."-(Washington Star.