The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1904-05-11
SUMMER TIME VISITS
"COME ANY TIME" is NOT AN IN
WTATIoN TO ACCEPT
A General Invitation Is the Only Form
Of Defense the Lake DweIler Has
The Polite Girl contrasted With the
Careless One.

Women who have summer houses at
the nearby lakes suffer much from in
considerate friends. That may need a
word of explanation for some, but for
those who have for many years been
lake jewellers, it viii be as clear as
daylight. What 1 mean may be shown
by the reply of st. Paul girl the 9TH
er day when a White Bear friend Of
hers said: Now, 1 want you to come
out whenever you feel like it. Just tel
ephone and say, Mrs. s., am COM
ing out today to lunch, dinner or all
night and 1 will be always glad to see
you" The girl said: THAT is very
kind of you, Mrs. s., but 1 should
be far from kind if took advantage of
your general invitation. Suppose I
should telephone some day when you
were giving a luncheon with every seat
filled; you would feel more or less
bound TO include me. Or suppose you
yourself were coming in town, or the
cook had suddenly left or a thousand
other contingencies which arise every
day. No, l appreciate the intention of
your invitation, but l shall never tele-
phone you 1 am coming. If you tele-
phone me and invite me for certain
day and train, 1 shall be most happy
to accept"
The girl was right and the woman
who had given the kindly meant invi-
tauon knew she was right after think
ing over it a moment. But where there
is one girl who will not take advantage
of an invitation like this, there are
nine who do, and lake jewellers will
cOrrOborate my statement. Many Il
woman has given up her summer
home for no other reason than because
she was utterly worn out by unexpect-
ed company. The woman who has a
lake cottage will never find herself
friendless. Persons she hardly knew
in town will develop into warm friends
during the summer. 1t may be a rest
and a pleasant change for the head of
the house and the children to spend the
summer at nearby resorts, but for the
mother and hOuSekeeper it means I'M
renting toll, and if she has a rest it
comes when she returns to town.
Cooks may come and cooks may go,
but the stream of company goes on for
ever. Telephones are fatal things in
the country, and wise lake jewellers
will suffer the inconvenience of going
without one for the sake of the greater
immunity from sudden and unexpected
company.
Residents of White Bear and Bald
Eagle pray not only to be delivered
from sudden DEATH" but from Sudden
company" 1t is so easy to ring up
and ask if she is going to be at home.
And your lake friend, who may have
cook sick in bed, and company SPEND
ing a week as well, will not like to say
that it is not convenient So the
thing goes on. and when the season is
over mother is likely to have nervous
prostration as a result of her summer
campaign.
When a woman says to her friend
"COme any time" the friend who is
wise will not go at ALL unless specially
invited. Come at any time" sounds
well, but it is a form of defense, and
about the only one at the command of
the lake dweller. But alas, there are
girls who have spent whole seasons
at lakes upon invitation such as this.
The English way in regard to coun-
try visits is by far the best and has
been pretty generally adopted through
out the East; that is to inform the
coming guest by what train he is ex-
pected and until what day and train he
is invited to remain. Then there is no
misunderstanding on either side, the
hostess is protected and the guest
knows just what is expected. This
works well and the tired woman of the
house can manage so as to have a time
of rest between visits. Here, however,
under the system of telephone invita-
lions, she shivers with apprehension
whenever the bell rings. No matter in
what condition is her cuisine she must
have a harder full to overlooking, as
she never knows when she may have
from six to ten extra persons to dinner.
Poor, tired, overworked lake dWeller!
Then when there is a daughter in the
family, heaven help mother! Boys and
girls of all ages arrive by every train
on the Come any time" invitation and
literally stay ANY Tins" which is, of
course, the fault of their mothers.
The wise mother will instruct her
daughter that to leave when every one
is DESTROYS of her remaining is in
finitely better than to stay one moment
past the time for which she was in
Vited. A summer visit is a great test
of the manners of a young girl. If
she has been properly brought up, is
courteous and thoughtful of older per-
sons, her hostess will know it the first
day of her stay She is too often the
other thing, shows that she has come
just for a good time, leaves her clothes
spread all about her room untidily, is
late for meals, neglects to say good
morning" to her hostess and goes home
and forgets to write the bread and
butter letter which should never be
omitted. All these things should be
taught her by her mother. The we'll
bred courteous girl is never an unweI-
come visitor, but the other kind is one
of the terrors of the summer season to
those unfortunate lake people who
have given the Come any time" invi-
tation so generously to their friends
before leaving town. We will have to
leave this subject of visiting girls for
another time.