davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18
Case Of Necessity.

We must part"
II was . br.iiian: summer evening. o1t-
side tire great restless ocean heared ard
moaned. The white beach vas deserted.
But inside the grea. hotel. with its siare
and glitter and its music ard the sound
OF hufry1ng, rythInical feet. all vas e.
element In . small slcovs Just on the
dancing hail the young husband vas
speaking 70 his wife
Yes. darling" he said. you must no,
mind. but hnd il viii be absolutely nee
essafy to go back TO town tomorrow.
A shadow crossed the face Of his bride.
Why you have only been here a
week. she said. What can you Ynean,''
Has anything gone wrong at the Officer
He smiled a weary smile.
Nothing. dear" he said but you
know this is the first vacation / have
taken IN years. and I find I've simply
got TO get back TO town 70 get a few
days rest-'-Sew York Herald.
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18

Isn't there something Tn my policy"
asked caller at an insurance once the
other day. about my having 70 report any
change OF residence
Yes. sir" said the man AZ the nearest
desk. picking up q PEN Where have you
moved tor
Il haven't moved anywhere" rejoined
the caller, Il have made a change in my
residence By painting II light straw color
and putting a chimney pot On the kitchen
chimney. ] think that's all Good day."
STRAY Stories
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18

'Cc course said the tk.a.s: patron.
'of all pIaysrirhts vou consider the bard
OF Avcn the premier
The bari OF vho-' incurred the ;h.-
atrical manager.
The bard NJ Avon: shak.s2e.e. yoa
know
''oh: Shakespeare OR. sure Tx. HIN.
He Doesn't bother ne abcrt royalties
Philadelphia Press.
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18
A. He Expressea Il.

so you don't mind my plano playing.
Mr.. Skorcher-' said the girl next door.
Not at all" replied Skorcher; Il Tx.
II best. though. ~hea you're cossting."
when I'm coasting-
Yes: when you keep your feet OF tre
pedals Public Ledger.
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18
Alss Nentiosed.

You say you we're oncc mentioned n .
presidential possibility
Yes" answered the melancholy wag.
when vas a little hoy vas toli that I:
was good I might -:rov up TO be Presi-
dent. WASHINGTON star
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18
a Pien for the Piet.re.c,.,

Wasn't that u"diaeval amor absuril?-'
sail the Young woman -ho Was looking
through the nuSeCu
Yes" answered to sa-i9nic rc-Son.
those PEOPLE she IL have voFn something
picturesque IKE o1- football suits ard su-
toIrobils mask"
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18
Selfish Little Amos.

Ma piped the FIRST young mosquito.
little Amos Is Just hateful
What's your little brother done :c you.
now-' asked the mother nosauiio.
Hes found a hole In tie netting over
that baby ,and he Won't tell me where
IL is"-Philadelphia Press
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18
Surpruise.

Mr.. 4: 80 y"I ins'st CT you- husband
referring to ;he girl IN his ofac. Is
typ.st-~
Mrs Il Yes He Is always talking
about buying ribbons :or his Typewriter
and ! want 10 he quite sgrc which one .e
mesas."-chicS.o News
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18

Mrs. Nevricile: And who Is this By
Pic--re Dealer: THAT * chrome.
madam
Mrs. Ncvr.rIn: ''Oh. yes. 90 co--s- q
IS Nov that you mention Il. recognize
Eis style"
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18

HIS feelings hc tried to disguise
The cirl. though. began :" sErInuise
That something like vooinS
Was certainly doOiuE.
Because of his looks and 5ecp suis..
cleveland Leader
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18

Geo---: "whst can - more s.cker'rS
than 10 -ee another fellow making love
to girl
Harry: TO s-c another follow making
love TO your cirl-'-Tova Topics.
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18

Tom: "oh. dear. I'm 50 tired: I'm al,
out of breath"
Jack. sort Of Z pneumatic tire ca7'-
San Antonio ExP-.ss-
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18

What DO ycu think Of SIr. BnsztnsT
Hes one CT those human eniEmss.
answered the smart girl. You can't make
I'd your mind whether he looks etupider
than he fs or whether he is stupiier than
he loeks"-Washington Star.
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18

"yack must Re very much IN love with
her Why, he'll. sit in the parIOr with
her playing casino by the hour: think OF
that"
Huh. II he loved her very much it
would be too dark In the parIor TO play
casino o'-Ph.lade!phia Pres.
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18
A Snob's Grievance.

Young man." said Mr. Dustin staA. Il
had TO work for my money"
We'll, father" was Tire chilly reply.
enough people IN our Set are throwing
tha. up to mo without your talking about
r"-washington etar.
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18

Three fellowtravelsrs IN the smoking
room OF q fas. train were Discussing
the speed Of trains
II was IN . train once" lid the hrvt
man. that beat everything I evsr rode
IN for speed. Why. Il went 70 fast that
tho telegraph poles at the side Of tie
track locked IKE a immense hns-
toothed comb
That's nothing sais ne second
traveller: 4 remember riding in an az
pres On ths and - that went At
such . gast tsaa the telegraph poles
Looked IKE . soNd board fence
The third man naAs an szclamatioa Of
innpatiencs.
"Ah. you fellows aou't know what high
speed On . faSiroaA - Why. Travelled
west from Chicago last month In . train
tha: went at such q pace that when We
pasosd some alternate f1slds OF oorn and
ossas tAsy looked IKE succotash.--
Bsspsr's Weekly.
Pretty Dsy.
Ysw6 Ssgdnnr dashins with 6ry ~:
esnr'
Scotch Hsp0s %. I'm snsnhfa. snsu
- az sas1sA Shes ssiekin' % m that
OA&AVW ~ SoSxO Ot1xt0o
fa6h16-DWA,
YR0AkA00o.
- - ShiAh Q Doctor ought % tel .
patient KaetIy what is the matter with
him.
"Yea" answered ne physician. But he
should use such terms - TO prevent the
po0ibiIity Of the patient understanding
word Of what he 0ya"-washinstsn Star.
Tine 80O0gh.
Mss Peppery: She says you appear 20
hare . habit Of telling al you know
ChoIly: ''Fawney! Why I never met
her til iavst evening. and then only for
I've minutes"
Miss Prps7: ''wen."-Philsdelph,a
Ledger.
4 Mean SLAP.
fias cl6un tcoyly): when he proposed
/ kept him In suspense for At least ten
minutes.'
Miss Critic: 'Oh. guess not. I SUD-
pose 1t merely seemed that long TO you"
wSuing - DeAssstrate.
do sou really believe that the proof
Of the pudding Is IN the eatng"
Sure Give mo the pudding ard TIL
prove tt"-San Antonio Express
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18
WORTH THE MONEY.


1 .
. lincoln. a
n
youg II hars In
o truth
q
In vNlN
oaaita abackro
VI = o >
him
a
Ny rend~ ~ssa astouih but he 'trnean
- L :, hn-
4 hint shatsv
pontyc diookss
o wishoutar
cognmer
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18

Mae: he said I was his pearl
0Iadys: II Eusss he wanted 10 s;riEs
Antonio Express.
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18

He has will Of his own. :hcy say
Yes. II came 10 him With his wife"
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18

Maiden LADY; 1T Is very good Of you.
SIR. TO give me your seat
Ia; o'Brady: Not 81 AL, mum IT'S Q
docty Ne owe 10 the sex. Some folks only
90 IL when 4 woman Is young and pretty;
but ! says tn. ses. Pat, and no. the :ndi-
vlduAi''
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18
THE LARGEST sMELLEg IN THE
WORLD

Tha: statement attracts unlimited atteu-
c.on.-Nsx York Press
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18

Tine BnO0Gh.


M!s oldun tcoyly): When he proposed
/ kept him In suspense for at least ten
minutes"
Miss Critic: ''Oh. I guess not. SUD
pose It merely seemed that long TO you"
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18

Wlulag - Den0astrate.
DO you really believe that the proef
oe the pudding Il IN the eadng-
Sure. Give mo the pudding and TIL
prove it."-San Antonio Expresa
The St. Louis Republic., 1904-09-18
An IySlyCATOy.
THE MILLCREEk rRILOsOPHEI

Forty swfuy this
suppc..
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1904-01-20
FUN FOR THE BABOONS.
Young Ostriches on South Africa,
Farms Afforded Them Some-
thing to Play With.

Some 30 years ago, when ostrich farm
ing had become established on a firm
and paying basis in South Africa, the
parties who had embarked in the ,propa-
ganda Of these birds had to face curious
difficulty, says an exchange. Although
lions, leopards and, to some extent, even
jackals and hyena dogs, had, by 1869, in
large part disappeared from Cape COL
ony, the country still abounded in small,
indigenous animals, the most numerous
being the dog-faced balloons, which are
the most crafty, michievous. trouble
some members of the Quadrumana. They
soon proved worse enemy to the young
and growing ostriches than all the
prowling leopards or jackals that occa-
sionally, invaded the ostrich farmingdfs-
tricts. Not that they killed or ate the
young ostriches or even robbed the
nests, but the industry had barely start
ed before these balloons were seized
with an irresistible desire to harass and
play with the young birds, just as mis-
chievous city children unused to farm
ways would harry barnyard full of
chickens. They would chase the young
birds until they dropped dead of fright
or exhaustion. At other times they would
catch and pluck out their feathers or
play with them, allowing the young birds
to run few steps, then recapturing
them and subjecting them to all man
ner of rough handling.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1904-01-20
HINTS ABOUT MILKING.

Milk as rapidly as possible without
irritating or worrying the COWS.
Always milk a COW in the same
manner. at about the same time and
speed. Any change Will irritate and
tend 10 excite her.
Ihere should always be a friendly
feeling between the COW and the milk
er, and mixers should not be CHANGED
II it can be avoided.
A COW will not give down" her milk
to a mixer she hates or is afraid OF.
and what she does give will be de-
icient in butter fat
After little manipulation of the
teats and udder, the milk is ready TO
come down. Then is the time to
take it, and do not delay.
The last milk drawn from a COW Is
much richer than the first. The last
quart usually contains more than three
times as much butter as the fist
No definite rule can be given as 10
how the teats should be handled in
milking, as COWS differ and hands DIFF
fer SO much: but be sure of one thing.
please the COW if possible
Have the stable clean and have the
COW clean, or You cannot get clean
milk. Lime and whi,ewash for walls
and posts is good thing. Land
plaster is good absorbent in the
stable.
When it comes a cows turn to be
MIXED she knows it and expects 1t and
wants to be milked, If you disappoint
her and milk half an hour later, the
chances are that you will get less and
even poorer milk than if you MIXED
at the proper time
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1904-01-20

you down here. at home when we've
eaten each others salt and been such
uncommonly good friends
He paused and pulled his cigar, as
II to give Kane chance 10 speak, but
all the latter's Old audacity had de-
serted him, and he paced slowly back
and forth by Kicks side, his gaze
clouded and his brain dulled.
perhaps it's on account of Stella"
Dysart went on musingly, as if loath
to cease wondering at his own pacific
state of mind. She's hard hit, Kane
worse than any of us, I'm afraid.
What's to be done?" stopping short in
his walk and facing him.
Kane groaned and staggered. and
would have fallen but for the help of
a friendly tree trunk, against which
he leaned his hand heavily in an ex-
cess of bodily weakness and mental
abandon.
Il wont insult you by asking if you
love her. Rick went on. Its plain
to be seen the little woman loves you
with all her heart and soul"
DO not keep her from men' burst
from the tortured breast of the other.
Il have no right to ask it, I know,
but if do not see her it will kill US
BOTH"
That's about it, l imagine" said
Rick, sententiously. I'm up the same
tree myself" he continued with a con-
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1904-01-20
CALIFORNIA; CHARM.
ViaitOr from East Will Miss Much
But After a Year There Is Ready
to Capitulate.

You will not find everything in couth-
ern California. You will miss the wide
stretches of green in the open places
far removed from the dusty cities, the
noble trees, the clear streams of water,
the blue lake nestled in among the pine
clad mountains; you will miss that
splendid miracle, the change of the sea-
sons, when your whole nature comes
into closer touch with the great mother
heart of nature than at any other time
in all the year, says H. S. Harwood, in
the World Today
Yes, you will miss much. bat when
you have been here year, when month
after month Of rare ard beautiful wealth
er blend into each other, when the
sea woos you and the flowers charm
you and the brown mountains beckOn
you and the soft air soothes you, after
a year has passed you find there are
some compensations for the lovely
things you have left behind you, you
come to realize that nature has done
more for this stretch of sea and noun
tain girt land than she has done for any
other spot on the globe.
You may have been charmed with
California when you came, you may
have been captivated after you had
been here year. you may capitulate and
consent to be captured by the time two
golden summers have stolen over you
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1904-01-20
CHIEF OF CREEK INDIANS.
Gen. Porter Has Always Been an Ally
of the United States Govern
ment-His Career.

A distinguished resident of MuskOgee
and one whom all men delight to honor
is Gen. Pleasant Porter. principal chief
o1the Creek nation. says the Kansas City
journal. Gen. Porter was born near the
town of Clarksville on the Arkansas
river, September &c, 1910. He received
his early education in the Presbyterian
mission at Tallahassee. Work congenial
10 him presented istelf shortly after
ward, and for several years he devoted
himself to the rehabilitating and build
ing up of the Creek schools that had SUI
Tered severely during the internecine
strife. lgain, in 1882, Chief Porter was
compelled to take up arms, this time to
settle a dispute between his own people.
AS general of the Creek national army he
ended the war speedily and for all time,
and succeeded at the same time in estab-
fishing himself more firmly in the affec-
ton and esteem of his people, who, in
1899, elected him their chief. AS leader
OF his people, Gen. Porter has ruled with
wisdom and judgment.
He has always been a true friend to
his people and a faithful ally of the Unit
Cd States government. At the age of 81
he married the daughter of Chief Justice
Reilly Keys. She died, leaving him three
little children. Another little one was
left him by his second wife, who died
when the child was but seven years old.
To-day, at the age of 63, he is as hale and
hearty, as pleasant and cheerful as ever.
Gen. Porter was reelected principal chief
OF the Creeks recently. He is not full
blood Indian.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1904-01-20
BUT ONE PROPER TINE,
Noted Massachusetts horticultural
Says That All Pruning Should
Be Done in June,

After three score years of experience
IN orchard culture, allow me TO say
something on the proper time for
pruning. There is but one proper tins.
the month OF June, when the new barr.
forms on the wood.
more orchards are ruined by being
Fruned at improper times than from all
other causes. Ii pruned in autumn or
winter, the bark will dry around the
stump and heal there, but never over
the end; this exposed stump will rot
out in few years, leaving a ragged
mole where water can enter, and the
decay OF the center of the whole tree
beglns, shortening its life many years.
II pruned in the spring, the wound
Dleeds, the sap often running down
and killing the bark below, making a
Dlack, unsightly wound, which never
meals over, and the whole tree is SUBJ
ject TO decay.
II pruned in June. when the new bark
ana wood is forming, the wound begins
70 heal at once, and no matter what the
size OF the branch cut may be, the
wound Will heal before decay begins if
the tree is vigorous and in good conGi-
ton.
care should be taken to cut close to
the trunk or larger branch, so that the
wound may heal over the end, for if
cut two or three inches from the trunk
or main branch, nature forgets to carry
the necessary material to heal over the
wound. and again the water enters and
decay occurs.
When from accident, the effect of snow
or Ice, large branch is broken. cut tenn
porarlly, leaving a foot or more to be
cut again close 70 the trunk in the
month of June
Inc reason farmers generally prune
IN early spring is that they then have
time and little else TO do and are a1x-
1ous TO be al work. and thus have some
excuse: but If they could realize the
damage they are doing to their own
property. they might perhaps refrain
and put their labor to better accoun, a.
the proper season.-W. S. Ripley, in
Country Gentleman.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1904-01-20
HEARD ON THE CURB.
interesting Diversion of the Open
Air Brokers Is to Bid in
Rhyme and Song.

| Without doubt the crowd of curb
stone" brokers that gathers in Broad
street every day that the ticker" ticks
constitutes the most easy-going, light
hearted-some say light headed-set of
business men in the city. The regular
STOCK brokers, who pay something like
$SO 200 for a seat on the Stock Exchange,
1t is true, frequently indulge in horse
| play of various kinds, but that, for the
most part, is reserved for special oc-
caslons, as, for instance, the initiation
OF new member, says the New York
Herald.
Not so, however, with those curbstone
brokers, who don't have to pay any fancy
! price for seats-for the simple reason
that the Exchange" to which they be-
! long doesn't indulge in such luxuries,
but does a standing business only With
| them pleasure and business go hand in
hand.
The plan of starting bids on a bogus
stock is as old as the hills, but is fire.
| gently rssorted to by these brokers when
business is dull and real sales are few
and far between
But by far the most interesting diver
sion of these curbstone brokers is one
which was recently discovered by acct
dent 1t seems that one of their num-
Der had a peculiar sort of sing-song
voice, and being commissioned by Gus
toner to buy block of Bay State Gas, -
had occasion frequently to make bid
for that stock The result was that every
few minutes he would cry out iii give
IS for Bay State Gas" whereupon fell
low broker who had block of that stock
to sell, and who had also good singing
| voice, Immediately sang: "Ill take you
up 36''
The effect was magical. Bids and Of
fers were put in the form of verse and
sung by the gleeful brokers, and, while
more attention was given to the harmony
| OF the song or chant-for it was more of
chant than song-than to the subject
matter of the refrain, not a little business
was transacted in this very unique way.
Since that time the brokers have fire.
! quently broken out into verse and song
in the making of their bids and offers.
Here are some Of the extemporaneous
bids and offers 'perpetrated" by the
curbstone broker:
(Oner) american Ice at % will sell. "
(Reply) AT that price you'd be lucky to
sell it in-well.'
| (Oher) Who wants st. Paul at 1922
(Reply) IF you'll knock off point you
can sell it to me-
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1904-01-20

by three-inch stuff nailed on right-hand
straight edge and the level fastened on
the right-hand side of the uprights. so
as to be out of the way of the staff or
handle, which can be of any length to
suit the OPERATOR The bevel is fastened
on the uprights with one common screw
at the further end of the level. The 9TH
er end opposite is fastened onto the
upright by cutting narrow slot hole in
the upright, through which put small
bolt that will just fill the slot hole side
| ways, also coming through tbs level pro-
vided with thumb nut and washer as
shown on the drawing. There must be
great accuracy in putting the level upon
the uprights to have the bottom Of the
level and the bottom of the straight edge
exactly parallel. When you ars getting
the grade or fall of ditch to the rod by
level by taking the difference on a
straight line with the bottom OF the level
measured down at each extreme end of
the straight edge, you can tell just what
incline your ditch will have per rod null
tiplying the variation by four. For in
| stance, if the difference in length of the
straight edge and the line of the bottom
of the level was three-eights of an inch,
the fall in the ditch per rod would be
twelve-eights, equal to u inches, as the
straight edge is one-fourth of 161h feet
| Always drive the tile tight at the top
of the Joint to keen out all the loose dirt
My experience teaches me that the water
! always enters the tile at the bottom. AL
ways use scoop to fit the size of the
! tile. then, when you fill in, the dirt will
| not crowd the tile out of line. In setting
the level for work, have the incline so
as TO have the bubble always occupy the
center of the opening of the level. In so
doing you seldom require the services
OF urveyor.-Prairie Farmer.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1904-01-20
MARYLAND LEADS OFF.
Oranges of That state Support Ma.
tional Demand for Federal Aid
in Road Building.

The state grange of Maryland is the
first of the state oranges to follow the
National grange in demanding that the
government aid in improving the high
ways. At fully attended meeting in
Baltimore recently strong resolution
on this subject was adopted, and Master
J. B. Ager in his annual address said:
There seem to be great interest at this
time all over the state in regard to good
roads. 1t is said that the government
has expended $500 ,0000 600 in improvir g
the rivers and harbors and proposes TO
spend 5000 100000 in building the 18TH
mian canal Therefore we believe some
thing should be appropriated to assist
the farmers in building permanent high
ways.
According to Secretary Wilson's re-
port the farmers have aided the govern
ment very materially. Discussing the
balance of trade, the secretary says that
the favorable, balance of trade 10 the
credit of this country is due entirely
70 the farmers. The balance of trade in
the farm products during the last IA
years. no year excepted, aggregated 81 :
SOC 100000 in products. Other than the
farm products during the same period
the balance of trade was adverse to this
country to the extent of $685., 600, goo.
Our farmers not only Cancelled this i'm
mense obligation, but placed s. $40 ,0O0,-
900 to the credit of the nation, when the
books of the international exchanges
were balanced. He concludes that it is
the farmers that have paid the foreign
bondholders. Now, why should not the
government aid the farmers in the con-
struction of roads? 1t is shown by care
full estimates that it cost 5000, O00, 900 to
haul the products of the farm to railway
stations, rivers and canals, which is
vastly more than it costs to maintain
10000 miles of railway, and by careful
estimates the cost could be reduced one
half. have no doubt that on some roads
it could be reduced much more"
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1904-01-20
Sensible Orchard Treatment.

In central New York, there is q H.
year-old orchard that has always been
managed on an exceedingly sensible
and profitable plan. The branches are
trained to the spreading habit,
which opens the tree to the air and
sun. For about eight years the or
chard was plowed and planted to
crops, which require thorough cult
walton like corn, beans and potatoes.
Then it was seeded down with alfalfa
and inoculated. This developed a very
thick sod, which is cut three times a
year for hay. This hay is fed to stock,
and then the manure is all hauled back
again and spread around the trees.
Under this system the orchard has made
very remarkable growth.