The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1904-06-12

called lonypop resorts. and at bars the
nomely cocktail will be made toslook like
rat man at circus parade. Yet 1t is
consoling to know that the price of
beer is still g cents, and 1t is possible
to have foaming amber served to you
without mourning the dispieasure Of the
autocrat behind the bar. II you are old
fashioned you may call for q lemon phos-
phate at soda fount, but you will at
tract attention.
While 1t no doubt seems odd to discuss
bathing suits SO far from the tumbling
surf the fact remains that these Aquatic
garments caricature humanity in a mer-
CHESS fashion Rather. it is not 80 much
caricature as a revelation Of defects
which have existed all the time, but have
been concealed through the kind offices
of clothes. Let a man OF a woman either.
for that matter, put on a bathing suit
and there is no room for further deceit,
especially II the wearer is fat. The fat
man in bathing suit is surpassed alone
in ridiculous absurdity by the fat woman.
while the lean man and the lean woman
come close behind. One never realizes
how many scarecrows there are IN every
day life until he goes to the seashore.
There he sees humanity unadorned by the
taiIors art and happy is that person
who can don bathing suit without ere
ating the impression that he Is something
of freak.
lol-
United States has been entertaining so
many royal visitors that everybody Is
getting used to having princes around,
although 1t took some time for the popu-
lace to become acclimated, as 1t were, to
the presence of foreign nobility. There
was a deal of disgraceful pushing, crowd
ing and c1amoring to see the distinguish
ed visitors. but 1t is hoped now that the
people have gazed upon royal blood to
their hearts content. While Miss Roose-
welt is of course Just plain United States,
she was given even more attention than
the princelets, which was of course right
and proper That is one advantage Of
having a big show. It draws so many
noble persons over here for our inspec-
ton where we can readily see that they
are nothing but human beings after all,
with taste for high life and the ability
to recognize a good time when they are
having it.
Accounts of people suffooating while
locked up in telephone booths are not
common but have been reported often
enough to make one ask the question why
is not some means of escape, or at least,
fresh air provided for the victims? 1t is
dangerously easy to get shut up in
telephone booth and hard to get out
when the door refuses to open or is
locked on the outside and there Is no
one to hear the muffled cries of distress.
Moreover there is no provision made for
fresh air in telephone booth and in a
short time a person shut up in 1t will
suffocate.
After all one of New York's great SEN
sations has fallen fiat and the public will
have to satisfy it's appetite for scandal
from another source. The Elias case
seems to have been ended by Platts I'M
willingness or inability to testify against
the alleged blaclSmailer, and she has been
released. In view of the recent develop
ments It is hard to see what Platt gained
by the exposure, since he is the only
real sufferer. Overwhelmed with shame
and lettering to his grave he presents
pitlable spectacle, while Hannah Elias
is not person who will suffer from the
little unpleasantness of being incarcera-
ted short time in the Tombs.
PC.