New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1904-10-30

Venetian. but Roman. bricks
IN NORTH DAKOTA
[owins 70 the Indifferent CROPS IN North Dakota this
Extract from Trade JournaLl
Under worn and leaky roof
The village blacksmith stands.
Claspng a kicking horses hoof
In his large and brawny hands
An ugly horse. that will not rest
Despite his stern commands.
He wonders as he works away
How long twill be before
He'll get his customer TO pay
A Psa 3ef 9lf be up PssJ dare isoT not
your credits good no more"
His task is done at last. ana then
Like good JOB: if you don't mind
While the smithy longs TO hand him ons
OF Jeffrtes fierce lett hooks.
Then to the postoface he goes
The city jo6beT whom he owes
And says that he must settle UP
In two weeks, without fail
That night: when all the village folk
Ere he retires TO sleep.
It IS a large and glazing sign
And reads For Sale Dam Cheap
-(AIilwaukee Sentinel
pompous individual from the East. says
Texas newspaper. happened to be travelling in
Western Texas and stopping at a hotel. when
trouble started among seine cowboys. who pre-
Stranger" said Texan to the pompous man.
at would be good idee fur you to lay down
the floor till this dispute is settled"
1T does comport with the dignity Of a Bos-
ton gentleman of my professions" said the POM
pous gentleman. Ito wallow in the dirt on the
floor"
You may be right stranger" answered the
Texan. as he prepared to recline ''but my opinion
is that you had better lose yer dignity fur the time
bein than TO have the daylights let into your sys
TEN by ~
The Doctor-You have heard this new theory.
T6e ProfessOr~Yess Deieiously absurd isn't III
It is appendicitis that keeps half you fellows eating
Observation-Disclosures Tribune
President Hadley OF Yale enjoys good Joke. even
II he himself be the victim. He tells the following
story on himself. according to THE Buffalo Com
merctal.'' and vouches for it's truthfuIness: Mr..
Hadley was travelling with his wife recently, when
they became aware Of the close scrutiny OF a fss
low passenger. elderly lady OF motherIy ap-
peaTance. The examination continued for some
time. when the old lady tptoed over TO Mrs. Had
ley and whispered sympathetically in her ear: You
to sympathize with you. We have in our fam
lily. too"
ADVICE TO A FOOL
II the world don't do exactly you think it ought
If you meet with o3p sS moa; &c. tootb.ou.
Get mad.
Get as mad as hops, and show IL;
P6a y and ees thc Van t. @ R9% know
Get madl
II tho joke sou tried to spring upon the other fell
10" Turns Get mad.
II you get the Doker's portion that invariably
Get mad:
Like the rankest sort of lubber
nd
Get mad!
II you step upon 4 manner peel and stand upon
Get mad:
Never smile and make Joke OF IT, or folks will
Get msd:
Turn and frown upon the spct
Where the pavement quickly shot
Up and gave you such swat
Get madI
II YOU wan. to be pleasure to the world you're
II yoga keep the peoples faees wrtnkled always
For there's nothing else so r1nr,
on thls mundane sphere. my honey
AS tho man that's never sunny
Get mad!
-(Baltmore American.
Tho Utica Herald Dispatch" suggests that her.
are two hands'in big political game. which wins
me ono IN the upper or the one In the lower row?
DoYAL 1Wusa
ROOSEVELT il AIRBANYa
pAIR DEucEs
your husband win pull through madam" the
quite severe, and we shall have 10 remove a small
portion OF the brain before the operation is entirely
'Don't remove remove any more than Is absolutely neces-
ssaIy. Pteaeeu the anxious wife. poor George