The Washington times., 1904-09-11
DANGERS OF TRIPS
ROUND THE WORLD
Home Run Haggerty Gives
Good Advice.
THE ALFALFAS' EXPERIENCES
Play Ball With Monkey Nine on the
Strange Island of
Fulobenes.

III" HERE is Just one thing would
like to say to that bunch O.
Il New York ballplayers which
is contemplating a trip around
the world this fall. an that Is. beware o.
the southwest coast OF the Island of
Fulobenes on a dark. tempestuous night,
with the wind thrashin an roarln an
the spray splashin'. IL they don't they'll
likely Eet some surprisin' adventures
like the ,A1falfas got the time they won
the Corndroppers' League champion
ship. an Josh Hapgood took EN- around
the world, or started to.
we had whaled everything in the
State O. Kansas that year but the Birds
eyes, leaders o. the Sundower circuit. in
the southern part o. the State When
they challenged us for series Of seven
games to decide the State championship
Josh said tia only give 'em prestige or
some word like that, if we played EN-.
so we packed up an started round the
world. We wasn't afraid OF 'em-not a
bit. But. as / said before, Josh was a
clever manager.
Not on the Map.
~ believe Josh looked for the Island
o Fulobepes on the map once an he
couldn't find IL. But. the good steam
ship Detonate found 1t one night two
days out o. Frisco in just such a storm
as I've described, an she went ashore
on the rocks just of the southwest cor
ner. The captain an a gang got into
a boat an rowed one way, an the first
mate an some more got into another
boat an went another way. an the
second mate took the rest in his boat
an piped of after the captain, an left
me an Josh Hapgood an the rest o. the
Alfalfas a hangin onto life raft on
the deck up where they keep the wind
pipes.
We'll. we finally slid the old raft
down an got ashore with our buds.
IL was the lead . night an we camped
out on the sand. though Reggie said
the proper thing 20 do was to sleep
in tree. like Robinson Crusoe did
We didn't see any treest you could
climb-only tall. straight poles with a
little green at the top; an IL Robinson
clumb one o them he was ready TO go
TO bed when he hit the top,
A LOCKER On
when we woke up in the moruin' tho
storm had gone down. the sun was
shinin'. the air was balmy. an a old
guy with long whislSers an a long stick
an durn long face was IoOkin' at US
Josh says Hello. Bill to him. an
asked him what part O the United
States is this. Then the old guy looked
at us with a beseechin' look, an finally
he says:
- 7 wished fer cucumber seeds, not
fer no durn ten men TO eat UP my little
store o. Drovender.
THAT puzzled us bit, an Josh put
on his most managerial air an cross
examined the guy. an finally the fellel
says his name was Robinson
+" 'Crusoe? says the bunch
. Not on your life.' says the whis-
kers. Not much. I'm the only de.
scendant on this here island O. the far
famed Swiss Family Robinson
rses? says Josh. He's the big guy
that ketches Tor the BaltymOres.'
Last of Mythical Family.
- No. no. says the only descendant
an so on. You're wrong. This is the
fsSsous Swiss Family Robinson in the
sIcry books. No relation to nothin' YOU
know. You've read about us. Don't you
remember. We wuz cast ashore on 2
desert island an couldn't git nothin
only by wishin fer it2 Wen we wished
strong enough we got it-genlly IT was
cast on the shore at our very feet Well
the other day ] wished fer some cucum-
Der seeds. an here l git you-an' L got
20 board ye till the next whaler come.
along
I'VE said that was about #. an ther
he took as TO a hut an showed US how
the original Robinson family lived IN 3
tree, bat he said since he got stifr IN
cooiin' of too quick after a ball game
he hadn't lived up there.
Then there was a riot, an no mis-
take. at nndtn' balIplayer out there
An when we told him we were a bal
We don't sayi Do teiif was ALI n.
cd say, his heart bein' too fun fer ut
terance- Then he told. US he left tn,
take your base an a foul on the bOunc,
was our. bait that he had KEEP playin
he'd Wished FOR the new book a q ri Mes
an II had been washed up on the sand
likewise balls an bats-or that's wha
we understood him TO mean.
The Lost Ones Name.
Bat. says Josh. all these years
how'd you keep pIayin' ball2 Yor
couldn't play alone. Who's here with
your
''P'or answer old man Robinson toote,
a whistle he had round his neck. an
there was a PATTERN rush o. feet IN
all sides, an in half a minute durneC
II there wasn't standin' in front o. u
ten o. the biggest monkeys an apes ant
cbimpanzeeB you ever see.
This here IS my ball nine" say
he, the greatest aggregation ever go
together. I used TO play first base TIL
stiffened UP. We got en- all. however
pitcher ketcher, first. second an thirC
bases, an left, right an center fields
An the 'rangatanB here IS the coacher-
the funniest guy when he want 20 tina
was ever put on earth. Pete tn
griileG I got I'm the Zambesi Leagu
IN Africa. He's the fletcher. an har
hitter. Them three brown chimpanzee
learned the game in Java, where the,
use a round stone stead O baseball
The rest o. the gang IS home talent.
Almost Unbelievable.
"we!l. 10 say we were iabbergaste
r. putin Il mild. The idee o. the thing
nine o monks, with g'riIers ar
rsngatangs an chimpanzees chucked 4
fer us to think that we just stood Their