davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1904-05-27
The Club Woman's Husband.

Surely it is time for the worm to
turn. The only trouble is that the
worm may turn in such manner as to
resemble writing. 1t is to be feared
that this is the case with the club wo-
mans husband. Not only must he take
care of the children, sew on his but
tons and cook his own suppers, but
must bear the gibes of the other sex
for his meekness. A Miss Genevieve
Cooney, before the Catholic Woman's
National league at its recent meeting
in Chicago, rubbed it in on the poor
masculine worm in this fashion:
Very little is known of this mysterious
him, except that he is Mrs. So-and-sos
husband He is a quiet, domestic thing.
without any bad habits, sort Of house.
hold pet At times he displays an intelli-
gence that Is almost human, just like the
family dog. OF him 1t might well be said
parodying the words of the poet Gray:
Full many man is born to blush unseen
And waste his sweetness in a modern
fiat"
He is a zero in the domestic problem.
His identity was surrendered at the altar,
only fragment of it being saved so that
he may still possess the virtue of signing
checks.
And has it come to this? TO be
called zero is certainly not a sooth-
ing figure Of speech. But this is not
the worst of it. Miss Genevieve also
turned prophet. The woes Of the worm
are but a prelude to those that await
him. Not only is he a cipher, but the
rim is to be removed. Hear the pre-
dictions Of this feminine seer:
The time will come when the clever
bachelor club girl who marries a mar
shall not change her name. She will be
Miss Dobbins after as well as before mar
riage. He will be the one to surrender
his cognomen and be forever afterwarG
known as Miss Dobbins' husband"
Poor supperless, buttonless, name
less, rimless zero, once known al
man, proud man." now a tning tina
receives even the pity of the spinsters
Possibly even the humble function O.
signing checks is to be taken from
him. But there is one privilege O
which he can never be robbed. Th
whisker still is his. Woman may tax
all else, but she cannot steal the lac
curtains that drape his manly jaws.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1904-05-27


Especial interest attaches to the
presidential election of this year for
the reason that it is the first to be held
under the new appOrtionment. The
last three contests were conducted I'M
der the apportionment Of 1890. The
electoral college then contained 447
votes, pa being majority. The new
Hpportionment gives a total Of 476
electors, 239 constituting majority. No
state shows decrease in its apportion-
ment The increase is divided as fol-
lows: New York, Illinois and Texas,
each; Minnesota, New Jersey and
Pennsylvania, each; Arkansas, Cali
fornia, Colorado, Connecticut, Florida,
Louisiana, Massachusetts, Mississippi,
Missouri, North Carolina, North Da--
kota, Washington, West Virginia and
Wisconsin, l each.
In the new electoral college New
York comes first, with 80 votes; Penn
sylvania second, with "a; Illinois third,
with 81, and Ohio fourth, with 49,
Missouri and Texas have each 1S; Mas
sachusetts follows with 10, then In
diana with 10 and Michigan ID; Geor-
gia, Iowa, Kentucky and Wisconsin
have 10 each; New Jersey, North Caro-
lima, Tennessee and Virginia each foots
up IL; Alabama and Minnesota have
each II; California, Kansas and Mis-
sissippi follow with 10; Arkansas,
Louisiana and South Carolina, 8;
Maryland and Nebraska, s; Con-
necticut and West Virginia, Z Maine,
g.; Colorado, Florida and Washington,
B; New Hampshire, North Dakota,
Oregon, Rhode Island, South Dakota
and Vermont 4; Delaware, Idaho.
Montana, Nevada, Utah and Wyom-
ing, 3.
In arriving at this apportionment
each state is given as many electors
as it has congressman and senators.
Thus a state with one congressman
has three votes in the electoral college.
The change in the number of electors
has no particular political bearing. In
the old college the south, including Ken
lucky and Maryland, had $50; now 1t
has 159. New York, New Jersey and
Connecticut formerly had 81; at pres
ent they have So. The total increase in
the college is 20.
There is probability Of seven presi-
dental tickets In the field with pos
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1904-05-27
Boston & Maine R.K.
WINTER ARRANGEMENT.
In effect October -, 1908.
Trains leave Newport

Trims lSttNS NEW pOll
For St. Johnsbury at 90 a. n, IL So,
t3 is & 10 AS a nj 4 90 and 81 p. m.
For Wells River at 90 a. M, II 90 0 OU
II 20 and IL IS p. nj. Return at rs
- So. 9 so a. m. 8 %, and 80 p. m. m
For White River Junct. at : 90 a. M, = oo'
II % p. m. Return at III so, and 10 a.
m, and / AS p m,
For Plymouth at 90 a. m, ~ 90 ana
81 IS p. m. Return at az 80 and 90 a.
M, and 90 p. m.
For Concord at 7 90 a. M, IL So, II %
IL 80 p. m. Return at 50 and IL Us a ILL.,
~ o5, AZ 80 rs p. m. %,
For MANCHESTER at 90 a M, 4 90 II 90 90
& III 80 p. m. Return at o5, 10 49, II Oh
a. m, o6 1000 Pm. ,,o5
IL 35.p. m. Return at SO 10 80 a. H.
8 10 $50 10 p. m. ,oz
For Springfield, Mass at 90 a ni'' II %
p. m. Return at % a. m. & 10 W. ,ozz
For Nashua Junction at 90 a M - ~, 90,
II 20 s. al SO pm. Return at 10 % IL "a
a. m, 81 & .9 SO p. M
For Bostc' at 90 a. m, II 90 II 90 20
81 35 p. m. Return al & 10 n. n.' oo
- 80 p. m.
Trains leave Groveton for
Lancaster at Is a M, IL SO 6 90 p III
Return at 6 40 & IL 81 a. m. . 80 p, m, ~
Littleton at 10 a. M, - 80, x oo p "'
Return at 10 10 a. m. & 30 p. m. :,
Wells River 10 a M, II 33. oo p !"
Return at o so q. III. 4 3 80 p. M.
Plymouth at Is a. m, / 3 ! 90 p :"
Return at Z So a. III. & 90 p. m. It,
Concord at 7 II a. NJ, II 33 x 80 p III
Return at 8 90 a. m. Il II O5 p. III. - -,
Manchester at Is a. M. IL 25 u oo p '"'
Return at 8 % & 1 81 Il. m. -,
Nashua Jet. Z 10 a. M, II 80 % p '"'
Return Mt II Oh a m. De-
Springfield at 7 Is a. m. 6 90 p H. Nv
turn at 9 O5 a. m. o ~
Boston at Z Is a. M, - 33 90 p il"
Return at 10 a. m.
icy #Runs daily. Daily except M ei,dav
aud Monday. Ali other trains run daily
except SUNDAY
DANA !. FLANDERS,
Gen. Pass & Ticket Agt
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1904-05-27
Do We Eat Too Much?

Professor Russell H. Chittenden says
that we eat too much. Yet most of us
are in constant scramble to get more.
But the professor has proved his con.
tention by means of experiments, which
he recently recounted to, q meeting Of
the National Academy Of Sciences In
Washington. He said three classes of
men were experimental on-several
professors at the school, including Pro
lessor Chittenden himself; several stu
dents and squad of United States SOL
diers. There was gradual reduction
of meat and other proteid foods, with
little If any increase in starch and 9TH
er foods, in nearly all the tests. No
fixed regimen was required in any
case, the endeavor being to satisfy the
appetite of each subject. In only one
case was meat entirely eliminated
from the diet.
At the end Of the experiments, which
lasted nearly year and were conclud-
ed only few days ago, the entire lot
of men who had been Professor Chit
tendens subjects We're in the best of
health. Their weight in some cases
was almost exactly the same as when
the experiments were begun and in
some slightly lower Their bodily Wig
or was greater, and their strength was
much greater, partially owing to their
regular physical exercises and partially
owing, Professor Chittenden believes,
to the smaller amount of food eaten.
The daily consumption Of food at the
close of the experiments was much less
than the recognized standard and from
a third to half as much as the aver
age man eats.
In line with Professor Chittenden's
experiments is the testimony of Thorn
as A. Edison.
In a recent issue of Outing the cele-
brated inventor says:
Eating has become a habit with most
every one. 1t is like taking morphine
the more you take the more you want. j
eat almost nothing. l eat less than a
pound of food day; three meals, but just
enough to nourish the body.
We are not all Edlsons, sad to say.
The Menlo Park magician, If popular
reports are to be credited, eats when he
thinks Of 1t and sleeps when he has
nothing else to do. When interested in
one of his inventions, Edison has been
known to work-well, we are afraid to
say just how many consecutive hours
at stretch, but they were enough to
make the average man dizzy at the
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1904-05-27
Or. GilmOre's Queen of the World
Hair Grower.

Agents of either sex should TODAY
write Marsh Mfg. Co. 53S w. Lake ST j.,
chicago, and secure terms and TERRITORY
Tor the sale of the above truly wonder
ful Hair Producer, Preserver and Beauti
ca boon to the Bald and BeardIess.
10 all losing their hair and to Young
men wishing to raise mustache moth
ing is more saleable than Queen Of the
world Hair Grower. Send M. q. soc.
Tor WI sample bottle. 1t has the merit
to win its own way.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1904-05-27
aZLIQ R3RZ|l|l||II!'lz!l|

To and from Quebec, c olebrook North s e''
ford, Lancaster, North Conway, bosto"'
Portland, and all points in the otaN
ofMajre and Maritime Provinces
In effect June s. 1908. =,
TRAINS LEAVE North StratforG III IIs al at
lows: For Colebrook and Beccher r""
10 20 a. m, OF, 5.33 and 0.33 p III, ine
For Cookslire, Dudwell Junction any
Ridge at TO- 40 a. m. and 2.O7 p. M o,,ehec
For Quebec and all points ON the
Central Ry. 2.O7 p. m. roa m.
For Lancaster 400. 6.55 and How g.
and 3.b7 p. m. ,5 East.
ern points 6. So &11.55 n. m. and 80 P.:@ "a
For Boston, via Portland, 6.5S Law
n. and 3.U7 p. m.
GEOF. EVANS, o,e,
Vice, President and Gen. Manage
F.E. BOOTHBY, G. p. & 7. A" AZ,
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1904-05-27
The Curative Properties of Humor.

A learned physician of Wiesbaden,
Germany, recon mends humor as cure
for nervousness. There are some who.
may regard the suggestion as some
thing In the humorous line itself, but it
is not so intended. 1t is offered in all
seriousness, and why not? Many cen
tenarians have testified that the ability
to laugh heartily is one of the secrets
of longevity. Sunshine is recognized as
natures great medicine, and what is
humor but mental sunshine? If any
thing will make man forget his
nerves, it is good joke. The cachin-
nation is the deadly enemy of the mi
crobe. When man eXpels his breath
in guffaw the germ goes out on the
gale. The old adage of Laugh and
grow fat should be made to read
Laugh and get WELL" Money spent
on dope may now be invested in hui
morous literature. On this theory
Mark Twain should be given the de-
gree Of NJ. d.
Possibly it is the increase in the out
put of the various funny men that ac-
counts for sthe longer life noted by
statisticians Of late years. There is
no question that the cartoonists have
contributed to the political longevity of
some of the politicians. The carica-
ture may not strike the subject as par
ticularly funny, but at least it prevents
him from regarding himself too Sc
riously. The DOoley sketches doubtless
contributed to the financial health of
Mr.. Finley Peter Dunno, for at last
accounts he was drawing some rather
large salaries on the strength of them.
There is no question either that this
same Dooley has cured numberless
cases of dyspepsia in other people. If
the German physician is right, George
AIDE and Jerome X. Jerome should
have whack at the Carnegie hero
fund, for have they not saved many
lives? Hereafter patients will be given
puns instead of pills. 1t would be a
joke on the bacili to hand them the
merry ha-ha instead of feeding them
drug store Humor cures mental
stomach ache as we'll as the physical
variety.
Laugh, breathe clean fresh air, exer-
else, keep mentally healthy and sweet,
and there is no reason why you should
not live hundred years. In this man
ner you may have joke on the doctor
and undertaken. Laugh at death, and
he will go away and let you alone. He
is very sensitive apd cannot stand mer-
riment at his expense. 1t is no wonder
that funerals are solemn occasions, for
solemnity has caused many funerals.
A man with face like horse is head
ing straight for the boneyard When
you need tonic, go to minstrel
show. A tuberculosis germ finds poor
picking In a lung frequently exercised
by laughter. Smile at your troubles
and they will get ashamed and leave
you. Cheerfulness is good for indi,
gestiOn, and dose of wit will get the
best Of bad liver. A sense Of the
-ludicrous has saved many men from
ridicule and doctors bills at the same
time. The fact that laughter is con
tagious shows that 1t is the only thing
that can keep pace with disease.
There is only one seeming flaw in
the German physicians theory. The
English are considered healthy peo
pie, and yet they are well nigh humol
proof.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1904-05-27

A great many new things are being
discovered about fishes these DAYS
One Is that they lie with their noses
upstream. Another is that they talk
Other fish stories may be expected with
the advancing Of the season, but the
trouble Is that most of the later crop
will not be new.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1904-05-27
HOW TO OBTAIN
SUMNER B0kRDEps

There i in New York City one dahl
paper which has made trrmendous
popular favor duriug the past tive ,-,-. p
net cash paid circulation Is over 1000.
copies daily throughout every srrtinp -
York City Intending brooklyn. lar,-- .,
that OF any other recognized resort -
This newspapers readers are anon. i,
wealthy. and well-to-do. intelligent -
those who can afford and do take Co. !.
vacations in the country during the SB-,--.-
II carries more resort advertising tb.n -
other morning newspaper. 50 the pul,I;, =.
uraliy look To 1t for information as 10 wh,-.
to go.
An advertisement in its columns i, tn
fore, exceedingly valuable and SURE IN =
duce results. This paper is
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1904-05-27

General KurOpatkin has evidently re-
Used the old saw about the man "who
tights and runs away" His version
would read something like this:
He who runs away before
He fights may live to run some more.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1904-05-27

A Connecticut woman has had an
onion growing In her ear for forty
three years. If it sounds as loud as II
smells. the poor woman should have
been deaf long ago.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1904-05-27
THE NEW YORK TINES

an he Ne'rs That's FL 10 PRINT
Write the CLASSIFIED Advertising nep,-,
ment for rate cards. sample copy and ,B,
gestious as to the best manner Of runuiD, :.
advertisement.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1904-05-27

The Only reports made by Admiral
Togo are those that result from the
discharge of his ten inch guns.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1904-05-27

A doctor says, Don't cross the
knees" With few more of these
medical prohibitions a man will have
to rest standing on one leg like chick.
en-.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1904-05-27

A scientist says that he can make
snort men tall. But the crying need is
for genius who can make short mon
flush.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1904-05-27

London. 1850. First Citizen-What Ia
The iatest? Second Citizen-The king
Is about to take up the Maybrick case.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1904-05-27

The report that Boston has bread
famine will not be regarded seriously
- long as the Goldfish and. beans hold
cut.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1904-05-27
M'ManuS,
Professional
BY o. Henry
Copyright. isos. by Sydney P'''ter---.
BY o. Henry

&TCMBER NINE, surgical ward
N was lying quite still. with his
Y eyes tightly Chased and his
! little freckled hands pressed
down hard on the covers so they might
not see how they We're trembling. Two
doctors were standing by his bed. One
was a large. portly man, with bushy
gray hair and a pretentious manner.
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-03-02
DISCOVERY OF COAL VEIN
MADE AT WICKLIFFE, KY.
At Distance of Nine Feet Below the Prospects are tx
ceen Tor Fine Vein OF Coal Discovery Means Much
TO Cairo and Surrounding Territory,

If from 80 10 to cents in freight ana
practically put the MORN IN mines
on OF competition ia that district inc
savings in freight rates alone on amy
reasonable production Gill constitute
an independent fortune in itself
What II. q viii il have on the
Cairo market2" was asked Coal
can be delivered al Cairo al ID cents
per ton as opposed TO 30 cents from
Big Four points and s. cents from
northern Illinois central points. To
do this" the coal operator continued
''it will only be necessary 20 construct
dump on the Kentucky side, con.
neeted by tram viii the mine, and
build an elevator al Cairo, The city
OF Cairo alone would support a small
mine and the possibility Of other
points is almost beyond an estimate
To the question What constitutes
a profitable vein 50 far as thickness
is concerned? ?" Mr., Wright stated that
while the Halhday-boro mines w5re
working in veins thirteen feet thick,
the superior freight advantages at
WickliHe would justify working a
five fest vein. This was matter.
he explained that depended not only
upon local conditions but the grade
and character OF the product itself.
As no samples Of coal had As yet been
uncovered il was impossible 70 even
estimate the necessities OF poSsihili-
ties in this respect The first point
that suggested itself and the most
important consideration 50 far as the
cost of transporting the product 70
the dealer ana it Is in this respect
50 far as the great southern market
Is concerned that particularly at.
tracks attention 10 the discovery
Aside from the direct benefit that
may result to Cairo from possible
coal mines 50 near. the city cannot
hut feet a lively interest In the pros,
perity Of its neighbor and there were
many expressions Of satisfaction
heard last night when the report be-
came current that signs of coal had
been noted the general wish being
that the indications might be speedily
verified. Future developments are
awaited with much interest
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-03-02
COUNCIL MEETING


A short meeting was held by the
city council last nigha II was fuil
council. In the sense that all We're
present Of course. and there was
nothing to indicate that there was
anything the matter with the diges
I've organs Of any member, from the
mayor down OF mp according to tie
view point All Eas S rene
Reports Of officers were read anG
referred. The treasurers report
showed that there were a few pieces
Of money both round and square, III
the eitys strong box City magis
trate Robinson coufessed he had tab
en- slGi from the people who had done
things which the ordinance said they
should not do and Justice Jackson got
only $500 for the city Chief Price
put 165 people into Tailor susanka
boarding place who wants over a dol
lar apiece or $t90t3 for feeding them
according to the statutes
The captains of the fire stations
made known their regular monthly
wants which were all passed upon by
the committee.
Petitions by Messrs Farrell, Fitz
gerald and Saup fm permission n
build houses were referred to tho
building committee SO called probably
because it never builds any houses
nohow
The petition of Mr. Mansfield for
leave to run a saloon IN the neigh
0orhood of 40th and Sycamore streets
was presented and as there was $500
in sight for the city which might
serve 10 pun an OK ont of ditch a
recess was taken and the petition
granted and the city treasurer an.
thorized to grab that $500 before the
man had a chance to change his mind
All the salaries Of city officials were
ord red paid at once and the claims
Of citizens we're sent to committees
to ponder over for a week. which is
according 10 the ordinances
/ A resolution 10 lay brick crossing
al the intersection Of Twentieth and
I Poplar streets we're sent 10 the street
committee
j A resolution by Alderman Fuller
that the comptroller be directed In
return ia property owners the tax ~
+ ceipts for leyee taxes. which had been
taken MP from the sheriff by order OF
+ the mayor was referred 10 the finance
committee for investigation and fhFy
+ will tell Ms Al the next meeting. per
haps. whether or not the city shall
Try to collect a tax which the Circuit
4 court has said is Illegal
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-03-02
GENERAL LOCAL NEWS.
Brief Mention Of Events Concerning
the People OF Cairo and
Vicinity.

THE X. NJ. X c viii hold one OF
their interesting sessions tonight
Nh. and Mrs. Thomas Pryor are the
parents OF a fine boy who arrived the
tirst Of the week
Mr. r. A. Conant went TO Grand
Chain Yesterday, where he was called
By the illness OF a relative.
Flocks Of wild geese were seen
passing over the city yesterday
toward the north and old prognosti
Gators say this is a sure sign of APP
preaching warm weather
A farewell reception will be given
10 Mr. William White next Tuesday
night at the parlors Of the Presby
terrain church Mr. White leaves
about the middle Of the month for
Pittsburg to reside
There will be no services at the
Church of the Redeemer after 3
o'clock this morning until Friday
evening. as Rev Edward L. Roland
leaves for Belleyife today to hold
Lenten services The usual prayer
service and choir rehearsal viii be
held Friday evening
The following report Of the y NJ. G.
4. for the month OF February has been
submitted by Secretary Humberd'
Room attendance 1la7 Attendance
Al mems meetings I'll Attendance at
Bible classes Is. Patrons Of baths
IS. Room ana board secnred for A..
employment secured for :.
Marriage license was issued yes
terday to William D. D0uthit and Miss
Fannie King both Of Cairo ami they
we're married By Judge A. Cominss,
The Cairo Telephone company or
aered new switchhoards for Cairo and
Mound City and they will be installed
in few weeks time The Cairo eX.
change now has so telephones in ser.
vice and several orders have been
placed that cannot be filled The
new switchboard will furnish ample
accommodations for the additional
telephones.
Mrs John A Reeves, a former resi-
dent Of Cairo, died at her home in De
catur Monday, after a long illness
She IL survived by her husband and
two daughters. Miss Ella Reeves and
Mrs. u. b Cole, Of Chicago. Mr
Reeves was at one time county CLERK
Of Alexander county and afterwards
moved 10 Springfield where he was
reading clerk in the Illinois honse Of
representatives He was in the mn
dertaking business al Decatur fat
some time Many Cairo people will
regret to learn Of the death Of Mrs
Reeves
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-03-02

A resolution asking that the plank
walk ON the north side Of Twenty first
;treet between Commercial avenue
ind Sycamore street be repaired went
- the street committee. which will
see about it, and Alderman Woods
resolution thar crossings ON Second
street at Leyee street and Commercial
avenue be built also went 10 the com
mittee although these crossings were
lrdered by the council months ago
At the risk of serious physical ey
laustioa the clerk read a partial list
# the tax payers who had not paid
he levee tax ana whose certificates
the city held, and il was referred back
10 the comptroller for completion
The council then quit business
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-03-02

Bids will be- received by the joint
building committee Of the A. F and
4 a. and O o. r. for building a
lodge hall and banquet room. second
story Of the Furgeson stone block. Ma.
kauda. I'll. Bids will be for comples
ing the two halls. stone and wood.
work All bids must he in by 4 O'Clock
D. m Tuesday. March Is. 1901. The
committee reserves the right to rejec;
any or all bids Plans and specilica
lions may be seen on application. Adj
dress all communications and bids tC
Oliver Mckenzie. Makanda. Jackson
county. Illinois