The St. Louis Republic. [volume] (St. Louis, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1904-03-07
COMPARATIVE NAT1oNoLoGY.

Since 1904 Hayti. the Black Republic. has had
nineteen rulers, which would be a fairly good record
if a large percentage of them had power exceeding
as many as twelve months, and IL there had been
fewer assassinations and revolutions. Since 1893,
Santo Domingo has had five Presidents. or a new
ruler for every new year, and in its history it has
had assassinations and revolutions numerous.
In the whole lower part of this hemisphere, revo-
luton, fed by personal ambition and avarice, has
been the system of shifting government. Venture
some politicians. Drawing death and defying con-
science, obtain the high offices through conspiracy,
and, ensconced in power, pay themselves magniti-
cent rewards from the public Golfers and from the
channels leading to the public Golfers.
+ The degradation of authority is the cause for an
other revolution and an incentive for stirring rival
ambitions. If furnishes issues for. appeal to an ex-
citable .populace. and produces another internal war
or skirmish, the spilling of plebeian blood and the
enforcement of another regime of corruption. The
fighting and the plundering warmly continue year
in and year out, and not infrequently with demon
strative complications of lofty ambitions.
Roosevelt, as in Panama, could effect a radical
change in Central and South America. He could
institute stable governments in every country there,
provide each government with a constitution, apply
the high tariff against them all and publish COM
mands that all officials should wear fancy costumes.
as the Diplomatic Corps in Washington is advised
to do. ...
Beyond these arrangements, little more would he
necessary. except, perhaps, TO establish civilian
military associations, in order to keep votes for the
dominant party. This could be done by organizing
orders composed of revolutionists.
With all the revolutionists united, under fashy
banners, wearing gaudy uniforms, there would be
no further occasion for war. Every man in the
country would be satisfied, provided the Post-Ofice
Department were all right and the President knew
how to write books, shoot, shake hands with prize
fight referees and be a good judge of horses.
An observer says that the revolutions are not
attributable to conditions of climate, which foster
slothfulness, rather than energy. He says that
revolutions take the place of elections. Probably
this view is correct. Admitting that it is, it is
manifest that the torrid-zone peoples have much to
learn from us. 3D.
Up here we prefer elections to revolutions. and
we care SO little about even elections that we con-
tent ourselves merely with campaign gossip Down
there the people fight. Up here we don't even vote.
We don't get excited when Indians vote on our
names.
Those people should tame their fire and initiate
us. Should an official try his luck at spoils and cor
ruption, we will not fight. We will not even vote.
We will honor him and let his companions in plum
plumber and injure public interests. But that
doesn't matter. We have talked, and we feel bet
ter. thank you. Wen get his scalp some other day,
when we feel mad. South Americans should learn
bow to take their politics with more good humor.