The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1904-10-06
coOD
Short

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According to one account OF the Par
ker telegram, II made Senator Till
man $50 agitated that he almost
cried" When his Virginia colleague
besought him TO- be calm. he replied:
Il always think the best. Senator Dan
Eel, when ! am greatly excited"
Tho old gentleman had just stepped
Onto the crowded car. and had acci-
dentalIy trodden on Algy Fitzgerald's
foot "Confound you, you careless old
bunawF' cried AIgy; you've crushed
my foot to n jelly "AhF" said the
old man. calmly. 'calrs-foot jelly, /
supposer'
The late Miss Julia Moore Cslr John
Moore's niece. like many very old peo-
pie. was extremely proud OF her age.
and lost no opportunity OF showing
r. When she was asked by a friend
II she was going 10 see the kings cor
onation, she answered: EMO. ! have
been out Of Londcn for the last three
coronations, and / don't cars to alter
my record" What an ~exaltation one
must feel at being able to say a thing
like that
ECONOMY" said Governor Chatter
ton, OF Wyoming, "ls always admira-
bic. A Cheyenne halter. though, was
disgusted the other day with the eco.
nomical spirit Of a visitor 10 his shop:
This visitor, a tall man with gray
hair. entered with a soft felt hat.
wrapped In paper. In his hand. How
much win Il cost he said. 10 dye this
hat gray. 10 match my hairT About a
dollar the halter answered. The tall
man wrapped the hat up again. 4
won't pay It. he said; I can get my
hair dyed to match the hat for a
quarter"
As an illustration Of carrying mill.
tary discipline too far, this story Is
told by General Nelson A. Miles:
"There was a colonel who, In the mid
die OF a campaign, was seized with
a sudden ardor about hygiene. He or.
dered that all his men change their
shirts at once. This order was duly
carried ont, except In the case Of one
company where the priyates' ward
robes had been pltiably depleted. The
captain OF this company was informed
that none OF the men could change
their shirts, since they had only m
apiece. The colonel heSltAted a mo-
ment, and said, firmly: orders must
be obeyed. Let the men change shirts
with each other"
DIR. Edward Waldo Emerson, Of Con.
cord, is fond Of telling Of an old serv-
ant whose heart was exceedingly kind,
and In whom the qualities OF pity and
compassion were developed nearly to
perfection He was once driving his
master and Emerson through the u
try. As they approached a new house
that the master was building, they saw
an old woman sneaking away with a
bundle Of wood. "Jabez. Jabez." cried
the master; do you see that old wom-
an taking my woOdT' JabeZ looked
with pity at the old woman, then with
scorn at his master, mo. SIR" he
said. stoutly, II don't see her: and.
what's moro, l didn't think that you
would see her, either"
Judge Jonathan Dixon, Of the SUI
prcme Court Of New Jersey, has a
habit, well known TO old practitioners
before him, Of asking three questions
OF counsel arguing at the bar. The
nrst one Is usually simple, and the
lawyer answers IL carelessly; the sec
ond one Is a little more drastic, and
the respondent replies with trembling
uncertainty; the third is bound TO be
a poser fraught with humiliation. On
one occasion Richard V. L%indabury, OF
Newark, was presenting n cas- to the
court OF errors, and when the first
question was ~innocently propounded he
said: 81 don't know" Don't known
cried the Judge; why don't you
knowT" Because I haven't heard the
other two questions" said the willy ad-
vocate.