The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1904-04-18
THE ;NONPAREIL MAN ]

III ,NVNA 0AkAS0 AA0M III
The Tale of the Little Bit OF; DeiiciousIy
New-oid Slang That the Modern Girl
Sometimes Springs on You in Moments
When You Wish to Be AIone-With Her
P. s.-ThIs Is Silly, Don't Read 1t.
A new line of girlish slang has come
INTO prominence of late. 1t may best be |
Illustrated by a concrete example. IS t
They had been sitting for a long time.
in the park, for it was spring and the moon
was shining in a most disgustingly sen-l
timental way. They had sat there for a
long, long time, as they sometimes do in
spring-and at other seasons-and he was
holding her hand-a pleasant occupa-l
ton at all seasons. The stuff they were
talking was very foolish indeed! If you
had to listen to it thru a photograph it
would make you sick. But if you are
one of the parties concerned, it isn't so
bad. ':=9+2:S-
The shadows were tremulous on the vel
vety turf, the moon threw molten sill
yer stream of light thru the tender leaves,
the soft twitter Of the birds dreaming on
their little nests-but why enunerate?
You know all the things that happen in
the novels just as the hero says to the
heroine: = IL 80 ( s.91-s
Dearest, do you know of what have
been thinking?'' #
mo, what is it?''
Why, was thinking it wouldn't be a
bad idea for me to kiss you.'
Then she springs that new and delicious
bit of slang that we mentioned at the
outset. She says:
How DARE you,,'' with heavy accent
on the 'dare.'' a
And do you know, from the results that
little bit of slang has, we have some
times wondered in our innocent, childish
way if it didn't really mean Cali right, go
ahead!'
Rock county claims the prize absent
minded man. He went out to his barn
to milk COW, and, without thinking, drew
his milking stool up to a mule in the next
stall. = The mule, not understanding the
game and fearing evil, stubbed his toe
and the Rock county man, dent and all,
was borne tenderly away to the hospital.
No one over 20 years old is accepted
for enlistment in the Japanese navy Nc
wonder they are so spry in handing out
large and frequent punches of trouble.
The folly of attempting to make a mu.
sician out of every little girl regardless
was exemplifed at Duluth when little
| 7-year-old Florence Radamaker was found
hid away in a cold barn where she ha6
| been nearly fifteen hours. She was nearly
frozen to death, but she still had the
! courage, to say: 81 just won't take m,
music lessons. I'll die first Little Flor
ence is probably a natural born cook OF
| dressmaker and they are trying to max,
a music-room annoyance out Of her. Poo
little girl! 81
A boss of a. convict camp down in Mis-
sissippi issued an order prohibiting drivers
| from swearing at their mules, with tn,
4 result that a convict Immediately filed {
| protest with the prison board, setting
forth the utter impossibility of gettin.
any service out Of the animals under sucl
conditions. The action of the board i
awaited with much interest.
Some fear is expressed that as the re
suit OF this eastern war, the bleacher
\ will lay submarine mines back Of tn
4 catcher in hope of getting, the umpire.
i If one man or one gang can own all tn
Oil ard fix the price, sooner or later on
man or one gang can own all the food an
nix the price. AS a matter of self -preserv
j alton, when this comes about, eve tn
people" ought to- be that gang. If this b
y treason, make the most Of it! &
Pearl fishers will soon have new wa
of discovering what the silent oyster ha
on the inside Of his little shell. M. Du
bois, in a, paper before the Academy (
Sciences, Paris, shows that it is pos
! sible, by means Of the Roentgen rays, |
examine the living oyster for pearls with
: out in any way injuring it. In this way
5 large oyster mortality will be avoided. TT
l future holds many dangers if the x-ra
machine develops. It will be possible wit
! a pocket x-ray machine for the stead
borrower in the printing office to di.
0 cover who carries the chewing tobacc
and where.
vi The Henning Advocate COMPLAINS
g s'the swell heads on the city dailies'' wi
;. 1'quote with high glee how Sam Olsc
Y sold his blooded Durham bull to Kn,
: Swanson but they'll write up,a whole co
|, umn about it if Fudge Heffelfinger In
: ports a thirteen bull, pup" The Advoca
: also complains because "the 6-point me-
sd goes Into commissions when he reads tn
o Bill Smith was over from Punkville to S.
e his best girl, but they'll come out with
half-page Of photographs if Regina
It Porkfat comes up from Chicago to s
v Gladys Floursack. Knut's bull could p
# Pudge's pup out of business in two tic
is of the watch, and if Reggy came
IS Punkville, Bills girl wouldn't be seen
IS the street with him." We fear there
a something in this. We are 'tall pore, we
critters as our grandmothers used
say, but we've all got to write abo
10 something and there are days when ,
n just don't care what it is, SO long as it
or writing, and the verbs and nouns agree
~ "A. J. r