Valentine Democrat. (Valentine, Neb.) 1900-1930, 1904-04-28
Q Q
Short
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES


No~~~~~~
Some things that happen on the
stage are very wonderful. An English
audience was recently marveling at
log which was playing a bit of an ole
masterpiece on a piano. Suddenly some
one in the audience yelled Rats" ant
the dog made a break from the piano
the same.
DR.. P~arkhurSt'S attention had beer
called to a morning newspaper account
of an interview with his dear old
friend, Thomas c. Plat, and particu
Iarly 20 the Senator's assertion, Il an
In town for business and religion
Then with a cOntemptuOus snort
why use eight words when six would
do? If Platt's going into religion, i,
must be for business"
The following tale is told of The
Bishop of London. Having INDUCED
THAI %precarious pastime of asking an!
small boy or girl in the audience t.
ask him a question, DR.. Ingram wal
met by the following: please, sir
why did the angels walk up and down
Jacobs ladder when they had wings?
1t is sad to record that even the Bishop
Of London was driven to make the usu
al h~umiIiating and miserable escape b,
returning, What little boy or CIR
would like to nswer this"
Representative Reeder, of Kansas
saw IL fiye-cent piece on the floor of {
Pennsylvania avenue car, one after
noOn, while he was on his way dow
from the Capitol. He picked the nicke
up, and said: rs there anybody in the
car who has lost a ten-dOllar gold
piece" Ten people, white and black
promptly said in chorus: Il did" "Al
right" said Reeder, as he slid for thu
door; Il just found a nickel of it. Z.
don't know where the other nine dol
lars and ninety-five cents went"
Mrs. Hoyt, wife of Charles Hoyt, thu
playwright, added much to the enjoy
ment of a Lambs Club banquet in Chi
NdSO ny ICI oAdlp anu WHY lOhSuC
always ready for a home thrust. Mr.
Hoyt was second on the list of speak
ers, and was badly frightened. He
concluded that he would plunge quick
ly into his speech when called upon
and with this idea he arose brisklJ
when announced, and started in: La
dies and gentlemen, l feel hOnOred, I'm
sure, by this request of the tOastmaS
ter. But it is so unexpected l really
had 10 time to prepare-a- l really
had no time to prepare-a@" And
he stopped Every n felt sorry fol
him, but Mrs. Hoyt seemed in no way
disturbed. When she noticed his pre-
dicament she turned toward him sud
denly, and called out: "Why, Charley
you did it perfectly this morning"
The stoical bravery of Russian sol
diers is we'll illustrated by the story o:
q captain who was unsuccessful!
Smelling a battery at the siege of Var
Sovie. Field Marshal Pashkievitch gal
Hoped up to the captain and sternl!
dShtu why LID hLIHS ulu IOl HdNc SOHIN
effect. The captain replied that tn,
shells did not ignite. The marsha
scOffed that theory, and threatened tt
degrade the officer. The captain picket
up one of the shells, ignited the fuse
and, holding it in the palm of his hand
said to the marshal: See for yourself
sir" The marshal, folding his ARM
across his breast, stood looking at thu
smoking shell. 1t was a solemn M
ment. Both men stood motionless
awaiting the result. Finally the fust
burned out, and the captain threw thu
shell to the ground. Its true" re
marked the marshal, turning away Il
consider other measures to silence thu
Snemy's fire. In the evening, insteat
of punishment, the captain received tn;
cross OF the Order of St Vladimir.