The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1904-08-28
Jokes on the Wire.
Lew Dockstader's Conversation With q
Philadelphia Friend.


Lew Dockstader never misses a chance
to put in a day or two, with his old
friend. Frank Dumont. They were boys
together. and both drifteG into the min
strel business, and both have reached
the heads Of their respective classes.
Frank advised him years ago to drop
dancing and to devote himself exclusive
~ to comedy and to make himself an
end man. Lew has evidently acted upon
his friends suggestion, and is today the
brightest blackface comedian in min
strelsy and stands on the topmOst round
of the ladder of fame. But TO my story.
Lew was in Atlantic City all of last
week and could not get up TO Philadel-
phia to chat with his friend, so he did
the next best thing. He called Frank
over the long distance phone on Satur-
day, and held the wire for over an hour
During that time the conversation drift
ed into a badinage of jokes such as
Frank and Lew used to indulge in when
on the stage together.
In short time Lew had an audience
ut his end of the phone and Dumont
had one at the Philadelphia end. 1t
seems that all the operators at the Of
fees and along the line caught onto the
talk-listened, laughed, and applauded
the chatter. II really was almost a first
part minstrel talk over the long distance
phone. and. perhaps. the only one ever
given by two such prominent persons.
Frank said to Lew: Lew. which jokes
are you telling in Atlantic?"
Lew replied: I'm saying that Roose-
welt has got the Republicans scared
to death, because three months ago they
nominated him, and only told him about
it Wednesday, and they had 10 have a
Cannon with them
At this joke laughter was heard along
the line. Then Frank started in Lew.
tell them this: That a man is never
too old to learn or to run for Vice Presi-
dent"
That's good" replied Lew. I'm tell
ing about two boys who grew up; one
went 10 sea and was drowned. The other
was elected Vice President and was
never heard Of again"
Loud ha-ha's came over the wires
from the listeners. Here's one for
you" said Frank. THE Republican
platform suits the farmers, doctors,
prize fighters and baseball players.
"Why?" asked Lew.
Because" replied Dumont. they We
got Hay for the farmers, Payne for the
doctors, Knox for the prize fighters, and
Root for the ball players and they've
all weighed on Fairbanks scale"
The clapDing Of hands was plainly
heard through the phone and Lewis
voice could be heard saying. NO en-
cores are allowed"
Then came LEWIS turn. He said:
Here's a popular song. dedicated TO the
national chairman" and he began to
sing, Il can't tell why I love you. so
let CoT-tell-you."
But a chorus Of let up" hold on"
etc, checked him off on the singing. but
he started in with The Republicans are
after the Irish vote for no matter what
they do Teddy says Wen have TO stand
Pat This was greeted by applause
and laughter from Philadelphia 70 At
lantic City. Frank asked Lew about
the Democrats. Parker is a good man.
isn't he? He's honest. he's sincere. He
has taken the gold cure, and he's an
right. There's nothing that can be
brought against him"
"Oh, yes replied Lew. they've got
something against him"
mo, they haven't" declared Dumont.
Yes. they have" reiterated Lew.
Well what have they against hlm?'
asked DumOnt
Roosevelt"
At this the phone fairly quivered and
Lew saved himself by saying. FRANK
I saw p sign down here that made me
rush upstairs and see the boss Of the
factory. The sign read, Experienced
hands wanted on" At this point SOM,
one stepped on the wire and Frank cali
ed OF the next song, and Lew had 10 fly
UP and Pier Young.
The diagram Of this joke lies in the
fact that Doctstader was playing on
iOuug'g Pier