The Red Cloud chief., 1904-09-30
HTICKLE
M~$ BY
W. BYRON WILLIAMS
An Editorial send Off,"

Jest erbout now down in or Mis-.
soury, tn same bcin' atween haydn
and huskin'. tn kcntry papers be ef
.~fervescin' with spekilashun!
The way ] hearn II, one a. them
thar newspaper fellers what has allus
been a wumeran ~teetotlar an q
mockcr q PONIES q pashun', mp and
:its innocorlated with that thar loves
ttful fever twelve miles frum a body
or acquer purcr, an his autymobeel
tire ~punchured!
Seem thet he's surrounded by tn
enemy's arms, he throws hisself inter
tn face q providence tthet o bcin'
her name), locks the gates behind
him an gifts shot whar I'm do him
tn most good!
Reference Is made ter Brother Hank
Somers, him as edits that thar noos.
Miss Henriette Soldiers, the school
marin, her as whom we bow ter In
spite q our rheumatic an tight fttin'
o~veralls!
Frum now on she's his'n an he's
hern. an II he don't split ther kin.
din as hc oughter. all she's got L
do is ter lay down tn law an Their
statootes therein provided!
And tharby hangs or tale. as tn
meat kleaver said { tn chopin
block after Their dorg had passed
through tn skissage faktury! Hut
Jest why them Missoury editurs should
be speckilatin' is more'n | kin see, fer
every man, NJ matter how he's bin
BLOWN his foghorn, gifts sumbody sun
day { put linseed poltises onto his
%nuraley. provided he don't wait so
long tn bait all gifts dried up an omen
ticin' no more!
Fer years now Brother Hank has
bin putin his own cat out nights nm
eoin' round braggin' tibet no wumci an
ever'd git him cornered inter a mess
q chippendale ferniture in his stockin
feet! No, stree!
Ey'ry time cr good-lookin' wum
Grand come prosclitln' Ground his
bailerwick. he'd sic ther Office dori
onto her an take fer tn bowels q hi,
sanktum sanktorium. scarder than {
ertated In er steel trap!
But tn good Lord knows best. an
one day Brother Somers he seen
lei tibet set tn whole dumme'
universe { singin' "Bedelia," an SIGH
like poplar musk! Then he begin te
quotin' potry, killed his dorg an so
religiouser'n all git ont!
Well, 4 make a long story som
less'n a spool er rope. he up an go
married an they do say down in Mis-
soury he dun erbout right c%onsiderin
tn gal, exceptin' he oughter seasone'
ther wind 4 Their shodn lamb sost nj
tn boys wouldn't a swallowed the
stoar teeth gaspin' fer surprise whel
tn weddin' bells got ter dom II
ding-ding!
When they went on ther tower the
cum by the great lakes, somehow &
ruther, to Shicago. They cum b
water sosts they could be seasick 1
each others arms fur the fust tan
LAST time! Well, him wantin' { sho'
her off ter excuse hisself fer NJ
askin' our opinion, he brung tn lad
Ground fer M inspeckshun, We ain
got nuthin' 4 say. bein' as how h
seen her fust, %exceptin' tibet she's
bit o f~emerninity thet makes a felix
think o. tn time when his Of wun
eran said II will" and he wilted. She
tn kind er joolry tibet amt goin'
I let her OF man git loansum wastil
his affekshuns m M dOrg!
Well. agin', Their boys all erlong 4
line sort err got, out an handed e
bokets with one hand and tied a ca
{ EN- with the other hand, jest T. mai
EN- remember what twas they ",
celebratin'. Down L st. Joseph, MI
soury, Bill Williams, bein' no relatk
o. ourn and probly glad Of It, he p,
or bell onter EN- and scared EN- ov'
tn state line inter tn hands Of Erne
MoGaffey, him bein' no respecter
! newly married folks hisself. Aft
: fritnin' tn life most Outen 'em sho'
u in 'em what tn tunnel caved in ar
whar tn Masonic Temple turnt
Iounu, VT 'dot c" 'os' =" 'o'o
! erbout TIL Their money Civ out!
Then we got EN- aboard u editori
{ milne and sent EN- back 4 hissour
: Here's hopin' thet nothin' never W
! git atween that thar love O. thern a
{ them or Missoury sunsets. whar I
roses is painted on the v%arikolorf
background in glorious splendor! A
may they allus read in each uthel
' eyes tibet: "Whomsomever lives trr
life Is boun' ter love true love!'
This bein' erbout tn wust thet's bi
. done L EN-, we bein' all busted I
7" with brain rheumatic, we're hopi
{ thisll hold 'em ter awhile,
: UNCLE BY.