The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1904-06-16

three Jumps of sugar with the eyes
tightly shut. Everybody suggested
everything else and Mr. Diggs' brother
got red in the face. He was led out of
the room by Bill Diggs. "Pretty good
beginning" thought. Jenkins all
this time was standing in an heroic at
titude, and when all was still he began
again: @And so, my friends we are
gathered under this roof to continue
our former, need say, pleasant meet
ings? 1t is with the greatest pleasure
that 1 am able to say"
What he was able to say he didn't
say, for Mrs. Jenkins butted in. Gall
that's very fine, Tom, but we didn't
meet to hear any speeches. For my
part think we had better get at the
second scene of the first act" So say
ing she opened the piano. Jenkins
wilted. At that signal Mrs. Briggs
took her seat and ran the scale up and
down several dozens of times. The
overture being completed. the actresses
ranged themselves in their proper po-
sitions and the fun began. The old
maid, taking the part of coy village
maiden, opened up with: "And do you
really love me?" to which Jenkins, as
the millionaire's son, softly gurgled:
eyes, my darling, ever since L beheld
your lovely face, etc."
If that old maid hadn't been so
homely, I'm sure Mrs. Jenkins would
have cut Jenkins part out. Even as it
was, she eyed him suspiciously and
when the coy maiden laid her trusting
head on Jenkins manly bosom land in
cidentally broke three cigars in his
vest pocket) Mrs. Jenkins got fidgety.
After the love scene came the second
act-which was far worse than the first.
The old maid had been deserted in the
large city, and to make things more re-
alistic she appeared with one of Jenk-
ms kids as her child. She was be-
wailing her hard fate to nobody in
particular, when Mrs. Jenkins sudden
ly left the room. Reappearing at the
door, she motioned for Jenkins to
withdraw. l supposed the powerful
acting of the old maid had unsettled
Mrs. J.'s nerves, and thinking 1 might
be of assistance [ strode down the hall,
ostensibly to get drink of water in
the diningrOom.
In the hall, Jenkins and his wife ap-
preached me and said: "Don't say any
thing to the others, but something
, dreadful must have happened; see all
this water trickling down-the stairs.
\ Through the hall ran small rivulet OF
, water, the source of which was undoubt.
, edly the bathroom above. "Do you
Think" said l, "that he has drowned in
the bath?" From their looks l knew
that such was their belief.
:, Now, when Bill Diggs took his
, brother from the parlor we naturally
l supposed that he would stay with him
/ but he soon forsook him, for wher
e jenkins and l went upstairs leaving
/, Mrs. J. to mop the front hall, we found
: no Bill Diggs. Going to the bathroom
- we found Mr.. Diggs' brother in th'
o bath which had overflowed. The mis-
|, creant was humming 81 don't care if
f never wake up" The water which hat
1 gone down the front hall was but
l. branch of the main stream. Tn
f greater volume had taken shorter Gu
: to the ground floor by running to tn
Q rear room from whence, after SOAKING
f through the ceiling, it fellin miniatur
II Niagara on Jenkins dining table. Will
G l aroused the bather, Jenkins hurrie
r down stairs. Just as Mr.. Diggs
l. brother began to realize his earthly ez
% istence once more, terrific cras
IS sounded from below. Fearing tn
q worst, l finished the task of dressin
le Mr.. Dlggs' brother, who by now wa
IS sober enough to navigate alone, an
rushed downstairs in time to meet th
ID Ladies' Literary Club coming to vie,
D. the ruins of Jenkins diningroom. Th
r. ceiling had fallen and covered the tabl
n- and floor to depth of three inche
IN and still showing.
IS While Jenkins and Mr.. Diggs' brotl
ID er shoveled plaster and lath throug
e. the diningroom window, the Ladie
of Literary Club stood by, and a quorul
of being present, adopted the followin
be resolutions:
,g Whereas, it has pleased fate to il