Windham County reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1901-1906, 1904-04-22
PLAIN TALK FOR PLAIN PEOPLE.
Crisp and Breezy Comment on Mat
tiers in the Public Eye.

|
(Written for the Reformer)
I'm not going TO argue the point OF
itinerancy for Methodist preachers
with Brother Davenport of the Barre
Telegram. | should be misunderstood
and some one would be denouncins
me for attacking the Methodist
church. I'm not attacking any one;
I'm simply swinging at wrong prin-
ciple, an un-Amercan principle a
demnition survival, In fact, / was a
member of minister's family till
was hustled out to earn a living and
| don't guess or think, | know this
idea of moving ministers around is
wasteful, bad generalship. OF course
a Vermont bishop isn't a car, OF
course he does the best he knows, but
he doesn't know, he can't know
enough TO place n hundred ministers
where they belong and where they
can do their best, most telling work
Read The Damnation of Theron
Ware and you will know more about
the results OF itinerancy than | could
tell you in three columns, solid.
see Punch" Daley, last years
manager of the st. Adams baseball
team, has hired out TO Barre and
Montpelier this year. Punch Is
good manager and was a fair first
baseman, but he was the most aggra-
waiting hitter that ever punched holes
IN the circumambient. He had a slow,
lazy swing most deceptive-looked as
though he wasn't trying TO connect
with the ball. but when he did hit
there was something doing. He bat
ted near the foot of the list all one
season that | remember, then. in the
ninth inning of a tie game, two men
out and everybody going home.
Punch lifted a homer over the bound
airy and trotted home with the Win
ming run.
''.-'Ar '-'- $500
Trouble with last years st. Adams
team was too much society That's
right Easter Lilley and Dud Drake
and Bobby Dresser, all nifty lads that
shaped up well in evening clothes,
used to pervade society till two or
three a, m. and then wonder why
they Mated to get out to morning
practice Fact. Society's all right |
baseballs all right, but the two won't /
mingle worth a cent. And st, Adams /
probably won't hire any more players /
on their shapes,
Years ago, before reformed and I
went to journalizing. | used to work 4
4 telegraph wire with 6. A. Fitzpat-
rick of White River Junction. now
OF the Hears boom in YER
mont. He was one II the swiftest
IN the business and If he knows as
much politics as he did Morse, he will
end the unterrified n chase that will
asst them for ten years. They used to
ell yarn about Fitzpatrick that
isn't true, but ought to be
old in the interests OF a healthy
srin.
Fitz was copying press for an after
loon paper and received the sentence ,
The Episcopalians ape the Roman .
SITS" He sent 1t along and the editor /
wanted IT repeated Fitz called up :
BOSTON and said Ed. wants 10 know !
Shat ape means Just then fresh
id on the wire shut off Boston and ,
aid, Means monkey you Junk /
cad" And so F'itz re-wrote II and
he sentence came out in the paper.
The Episcopaians monkey with the
But the -telegrapher 7
NJ PiobipiS HehS 'hiN ~ Sou "Sh :,
i'm.
MY Brother BeTnap in Bellows {
aIls gets out the Times every week n
nd frequently thinks editorial ;
loughts that are worth thinking. He a
gently said that "the republican
lrty will not In its platform favor
ldical change In the existing local +,
otion law. During the next session D
the Legislature the law will probably .,
Sc several of its tail feathers" Now II
MT that characteristic of the two by @,
ur stuff that Vermont keeps send h
g to Montpelier? What the party "
Tvs doesn't matter, what the leaders II
ink doesn't matter, but II a parcel W
prohibition howlers tell him that nj
'ense Is curse. then the spinach IN
hiskered legislator viii proceed to 81
smember a law that is doing more pt
r temperance progress today than ST
ate prohibition did in fifty years!
1ats progress-to the rear
A Mddlebury man set an incubator :,
tn 100 eggs and succeeded in rescu- -,
g three live chicks. Good dead like ~ ~
lsted effort, wasn't it? Makes me -,
ink Of the skit I heard in a show i
e other night: -
Say" said the suffering comedian. en-
Which is the mother of a chicken AZ
e hen that lays the egg or the one ho
ut matches it?" ~
Why the one that matches It. of na
lrse" said the tramp. A.,
No, l guess not said the first 49,
list. You know what an inkybator ~
No? Well, an inkybator is a Ill IN,
ng that you put eggs into, then T.,
n crank and they come out chick in.
y" Iu'
We'll, what's that got to do with 20 re-
TO
Well If turned that crank, would
be the chickens mother? No,
ass not" -
That's the kind of a chicken maker a.
y need in Middlebury IN