The commonwealth. (Greenwood, Miss.) 1896-1923, 1904-09-10
AN UP-To-pATE HOTEL
Rules and Regulations Which cou,.
Not Fail to Please the Most
Exacting Guest.

Tackled to a pillar in the parlor.er.
change OF an excellent summer bots, !.
the Blue Ridge, not anything Ike
thousand miles from WASHINGTON e.rs
the Star, is the following neatly tvn.
written presentation of the hotels "a
yantages:
This hotel has been built and ar.
ranged for the special comfort and con.
yenience OF the travelling public.
"on arrival each guest will be asked
how he likes the situation, and II he saws
the hotel oughtto have been placed near.
er the railroad depot, the location Of tbo
house will be Immediately changed.
Corner front rooms, up only OF.
flight, for each guest.
Every guest will have the hes, ss,,
in the dining hall and the best waiter in
the house.
Children will be welcomed with &c.
light, and are requested to bring hoon.
sticks and hockeys to bang the carved
rosewood furniture, especially provided
for that purpose, and peg tops to spin on
the velvet carpets. They will be allowed
TO bang on the piano at all hours, fan
downstairs, carry away dessert enough
for a small family in their pockets a,
dinner, and make themselves as general,
ly disagreeable as the fondest mothe,
can desire.
washing allowed in rooms. Ladies
giving an order to put me on a fatiron,
Will be given one any hour of the day or
night.
The Office clerk has been carefully 60.
lected, out of a large number of apnli.
cants, to please everybody. He can lead
In prayer, play draw poker. match
Worsteds in the village store, play bill.
lizards, is a good Walter, can lead the
german, make a fourth at euchre. amnse
the children, is a good Judge of race
horses and keeps the dope books right
up to the minute; as a railroad or steam.
boat reference is far superior to Apple.
toms Guide or anybody else's; will fiirt
with any young lady involuntarily in
clined to wallfiowerishness, and moi
mind being cut to death when pa comes
down.; can room 40 people in the best
room in the house when the hotel is full
and they're sleeping in the halls on cots
Tour deep; attend to the annunciator and
the telephone, and answer questions In
Greek, Hebrew, Choctaw. Irish. Siwash
kanaka, Filipino or any other polite Ian.
guage, all at the same moment, without
turning a hair.
Dogs allowed in any room in the
mouse, The management will esteem II \
special favor if persons owning small foS
terrier pups, just at the teething stage
Will see to it that the NUTS eat ND all
the upholstery they can during their 50.
journ in our midst.
Separate golf links for each and every
guest OF the house, with four caddies to
each guest, without extra charge.
Guests are particularly requested to
allow the spigots to remain open and the
water to run in their room wash basins
all night.
Amy lady who feels agsrieyed because
some other lady has more and better
clothing has only to report her grievance
to the clerk, and the offender will be
turned out of the house at once.
The landlord will always be bappy tc
hear that some other hotel a few squares
away is the best hotel in the country
Any chambermaid falling to make ur
each guests room and bed the first thine
in the morning, before any of the other
room or beds are attended to, will be
handed over to the police.
Women with several young children
are requested to see to it that their young
ones play jumping from the Brooklyn
bridge and 'catchey-horsey' as soon as
they awaken at half-past five each morn
ing, in order that persons occupying
below may sleep better.
ANY lady Directing to the presence
of the bar in the basement has only to
report her objection TO the management,
and the bar will be closed at once and the
fixtures sold to the highest bidder.
SiSNotoi boy5s Especially tU-
for their affability, are required
carry all the children In the house
from the basement to the top floor OF the
house at all hours of the day and night.
Adult guests are not permitted to in
terfere with the children in this matter.
THE string orchestra has been espe-
chosen for its ability to render "a
different request compositions at one
and the same time.
All children above the age of three
years are permitted to run the house au-
tomobile anywhere they want to run it.
The house holds itself responsible for
any damages resulting to children or
automobile.
Mothers of little girls are particularly
'equested to have these angel children
% play the Chop Sticks and Monastery
on the hotel piano at all hours.
Small boys are permitted, without re-
,roval, to pull the plug out of the swim
ming pool in the basement.
I'VE don't know how long we're going
o last, but we're going to last as long as
We IAN.
For furthsr information as TO the
house and its advantages see booklet"
Effects of Simple Living.