The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1904-10-13
C0MMERCIAL-APPEAL NOTES.

Democrats are waking up and the re-
publicans are hunting their holes Ten
nessee.
A Pittsburg Judge has sent a man to
jail for trying to bride him with a dol.
lar. Next time, perhaps, they will
offer the Judge his price.
There is one valuable feature about
the works of Theodore Roosevelt. The
reader can post himself therefrom on
both sides of every public question
Senator Hoar was dead game to the
last. Il am now engaged, he said,
Gin the delightful occupation of dy-
ing" Dear, brave, clean hearted old
mani
Mr.. Roosevelt has had much to say
about ours not being the creed of the
weakling and the coward. Yet accord
ing to the official reports of the war de-
partment Mr.. Roosevelt wanted to quit
before Santiago.
Jesse Littleton made a savage attack
upon the management of the Univer-
sity of Tennessee, but it turns out the
management is republican, and now
Jesse, having had to swallow his words,
looks like an inflated balloon.
There are some people who think
that Judge Parker ought to make a
monkey of himself once a week to at
tract public attention. But he has
wisely decided to give Mr.. Roosevelt
the exclusive privilege of climbing the
tree.
Editor Reaves of the Hardeman Free
Press has decided to challenge Pom
sonby Pole-Carew for leaving his name
out of the royal descendants in this
country. Editor Reayes says that one
of his ancestors came over with the
first sloop, loaded with rum, that hit
the American coast.
Grant Matthews may play the same
tune in West Tennessee that he is play
ing in East Tennessee and play itquite
as skillfully; but he will find that the
acoustic properties here are different
and that it will not sound near so well.
But Grant is q good fellow and he will
get what he is looking for-political
prominence and the first grab at the pie
counter.
We wuz down to Memphis the Tues
day after the second Sunday. Cy Lyle
wuz with us. Cy had sold aigs an got
him a piece of money. He cares no
more for spot cash than a sailor does
for rain an what happened wuz a
plenty. We are at home with favor
able symptoms Of recovery; Cy is there
yet, but the police will not turn him
loose until he quits thinkin' he is the
Archbishop of Canterbury.-H ardeman
Free Press.
We was down to Memphis week come
Monday with Cy Lyle of the Johnson
lCity Comet and we met the Slitzheuser.
Budweiser All-Star- Adamless Eden
| Troubadours and the stunts we done
was sump'n awful. Fierce is tame
name for it. Cy was holdin' Of big
blondes two hands an asingin'
"Lookin' Thru the Knothole in Me
, Fathers Wooden Leg" when we lost
consciousness and went to the floor an
took the count. -Hardeman Free Press
Cy Lyle of the johnson City Come
had passed. of rot in his sheet las
week sayin' when we called our paper
the Free Press we was salem under
falst colers and lowed that with kae
Of black lie and five gallons OF kero
sene, j ohm d. Rockefeller has subsidized
us. Everybody knows that a grea
press like ours iist natchully eatl
grease, and they also know we have tt
burn mid mite lie in writing our worlC
removed editorials. He never wal
right bright, no how. He calls hil
paper the Comet because it don't ap
pear often. -Hardeman Free Press.