The Birmingham age-herald., 1904-11-06

well said Mir. Hennessy, fits almost here.,
 whats that?' asked Mr. Dooley.
 .I1liction day" said Mr. Hennessy.
 "oh, 50 it is," said MT. Dooley. ITO be sure. I'd clane f'rgotten. It's aye they here or it's just past or something Well. what about 1t? Dye want me ad- vlce?'
 T do not" said MT. Hennessy
 T thought not said MT. Dooley. An ye don't need amy No wan does A man makes up his mind how he's goin' to vote about tn time his father was born an niver changes it onless he is an indepindant an thin he spells his ballot or thries to vote in the wrong ward. Nevertheless. Hinnissy, I'm goin' to give ye tn blnidt iv me advice. I'll give it to ye If I have to lock tn dure an throw ye down on tn fiure. Whats pol lytical advice fir if it's not to be given? have more iv it than I can use. I've teen accumylatin 1t fr years.
 Tn tn first place. ye can't make mis- take. Tn issues ar-re clearly marked. There are none. All tn candydates are fearless, pathriotic, conscientious, willin', good fellows. firm what they tell me. Tn counthry wud be betther off if amy wan iv thlm is illicted or defeated Tn eounthry wud be betther off no matther what happened. It's a betther off kind iv counthry anyhow. I know ye have 1t in ye'er mind to save 1t, but speakin' fir tn country, I wish to say here an TOW that ye needn't bother about throw in it amy life presarvers. Tn coun- thry, me boy, is swimmin' on its back smol<in a seegar an havin tn time iv it's life. Annywan who thries to save this eounthry is in fr good lickin'. So. me fellow citizens, ye can go to tn liv- ry stable or barber shop, whichiver temple tn Goddess iv Liberty has choose in yeer precinct, an vote with certainty that ye have not sthruck a fatal blow at ye'er beloved counthry. Go fin to that sacred an smelly cupboord, seize tn pencil firmly in ye' CT hand make a little prayer f'r guidance. shut ye'er eyes an jab at tn ballot. Yeer in- stinets will detarmine where tn pencil will land. Ye CT can't go wron if tn vote is counted. In fact, Hinnissy, ye wud be doin' nawthn' that would make George Washington or Abraham Lincoln mad if ye didn't vote at all. Fear nawthin' If tn counthry thought ye cud injure 1t, do ye think we'd let ye vote?
 "On tn ballot, ye will find twinty can dydates fr tn highest office in tn gift iv tn American people except county threasurer. I can raymimber five me silf.
 'Thaydore Rosenfelt, tn republican eandydate f'r tn dlmmycratic vote was born iv an ol Quaker fam ly. Arly in life he sowed his Quaker Oats but naw- thin come iv it. He was idjacated at Harvard College where tn kicks come firm an It tn age iv foorteen, he en- thered pollytics. Tn list iv killed an in- jured was published at tn time. In poll lytica1 life. he endeared himsilf to all be his quiet manner an ca m judgment to such an extent that tn leaders iv his party were undecided whether they ought to make him vice-prisidint or merely dhr1Wn him. They chose tn former because he cud swim. Be superb statesmanship in that lofty but remote station, he become prisidint iv this here nation. With his recent histhry ye ar-re familyar, Hlnnissy. So am I. So Is he. I will not speak further iv it. He is is- slntually man iv peace. devoted to his family an exthramely fond iv his books. Durin' tn Spanish war. he sarved his counthry as a thrained nurse, batin' Clara Barton to tn top iv San Joon Hill. He is tn author iv tn cillybrated sayin': Pericarditis alive or Rassely dead which was aftherward changed to Per icarditis alive fr fifty thousan' or Rasse- ly dead broke' His motto is T mean no harm His fav-rite spoort is twinty questions His favrite pets are tn bird iv peace an tn round robin If ye vote rr Thaydore Rosenfelt, ye need not fear that yeer act will embroil or fry this eounthry in a European war. We won't need it. He Is fir peace at amy price, on'y tn ilietion expenses may be so heavy he may not have tn price. If ye,er vote IS fr all that an American holds dear fr manhood, fir tn high ,deels iv etyzenship. yell vote fir Thay- dore Rosenfelt But he'll take it aven if it isn't He'll take amy kind iv vote.
 ..Alton Blank Parker was nommynated