West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1904-05-05

in Kingwood.
The Court House Crowded to SUI.
location With Dead Pie hunters
and Their Friends.
The Saddest Gathering in the His.
tory Of the County.
Chief Mourner Flynn ofiiciated as
Chairman Of the Meeting.
L he Weeping and Mourning
Throughout the Funeral Grafton
was Heart Rendering.
No Enthusiasm to Inspire The
Rambler to Flights Of Oratory
or Eloquence.
The primary contest which has
been fraught with so many hopes
for the political pie hunters has at
last rendered an account of it's
stewardship. That many have met
with disappointment in every
village is attested by the Grape on
tire doors. Visions OF pies and
political hours have disappeared.
Many OF my warmest and most
intimate friends are among the
dead. "Weep and you weep alone"
does not apply to the Buck wheat
county today. Those who are
weeping largely out number those
who are rejoicing. cannot rejoice
while so many of my friends are
weeping. am filled with remorsc,
and nothing but the duty which
owe the party could induce me to
follow the trail of the pie. hunters
who are still running at large.
But, then again, my bread and
butter depends upon the grist
grind out each week. The next
few gaindings will not be of the
roller process. 1t will be turned
out by the old water wheel. Water
will be our liquid for the next few
months, which, if taken in large
draughts will keep the kidneys
running. But smaller quantity
of gin would answer the same
purpose. prefer gin, which had
an extensive circulation during
the primary campaign. Those who
/ have visited within the last few
days, inform me the supply has
been exhausted.
have letter from the pie.
hunters who are numbered among
the dead, which / append and is
self explanatory:
"Headquaters of the Defeated Pie
Hunters.
Kingwood, w. Va, May l, 1904.
To The Rambler,
Argus Building.
Esteemed Sir and Brother:- 1t is
our melancholy duty to inform you
that we are politically dead for
this year. We have gwen up the
ghost; or, to be more accurate, the
ghost has gwen us up for dead
We had many promises, but few
votes, hence our death knelI. We
were appointed a committee to
inform you of this sad fact, and to
say to you that by unanimous vote
you were chosen to deliver the
Grafton over our dead aspirations.
We cannot promise you much
enthusiasm as we exhausted the
supply during the Primary contest.
We have nothing to offer you but
mutterings of disconten and broken
promises. We will meet you IN the
court house, where justice is sup.
posed to reside, Tuesday night,
May Bird. BE prepared to exhort
in your most vigorous wav. for il
will require thunder, and plenty OF
it to wake us up.
Yours in death,
Committee
When / received this letter
was driven 70 tears, which / shed
copiously and without restraint.
knew OF no other way in which /
could express my sympathy for the
heroes who had called upon me 10
give public utterance to my sorrow.
Many would be present who con
tributed largely to the death Of
my friends. But as ] have never
shirked public duty, there was
nothing left for me TO do but accept
the invitation.
At the appointed hour she court
house vas filed until standing
room was at premium. The
dead pie-hunters and their friends
we're out in full force. So was
Sheriff Lenhart an his deputies,
as it had been circulated that ]
was going to infsme the dead pie
L.,... -. 4 i. .....t - go