The National tribune., 1904-03-24
Y going 70 Jun Tor Congress. Surely IL
I'd 'tsels i hurdt tsrs quite Is easy. ~''

March 16, aftsr an operation for appe1di.
citis. Mr.. Thurbsr was vary nice little
gentleman, but he got good deal OF fun
poked at him, after he became Secretary
ton that the President vsas a kind of royal
parsonage upon whom the winds of heaven
were not to be permitted to blow too
harshly. He used to trot around after
the President like. a valet, but he meant
it all right. He made his fiercest mistake
in tackling newspaper correspondents for
things they said about Cleveland. There
was no rest for Mr.. Thurber after that.
He was Q stranger in town. You could
tell that by the way he looked uneasily
about, not quite sure of his bearings. He
finally got into the Capitol and sided up
to Lieut.. Jones at the main door of the
House. Can / 90 right in on this card 2
he asked Lieut.. Jones. showing a visitor
card good for two weeks.
Visitors gallery to the right, one
fight up declared Lieut.. Jones senten-
tiously, grabbing three women and a
child who were bent on pushing through
the swinging House doors.
But this here Is special permit per-
sisted the stranger.
Same as everybody gets" declared
Lieut.. Jones. ITO your right one flight
up"
''But my member is Mr. Blank Blank,
and I'm Chairman of his Congressional
Committee, man! Good Lord! you don't
suppose he is going to put me in no gal
lery! Not on your life! I'm goin' right in
here"
Your going right outdoors, and that
pretty quick, if you don't clear this pas
sageway. You can't go on the floor Visi-
tors gallery to your right one fight up"
which was for the benefit of dozen
young women who were shrilly inquirng
the way into the House.
The stranger disgustedIy turned to the
right and went one flight up. He found
the Visitors gallery and sat there little
while, but pretty soon came back to Lieut..
Jones.
Say. Mr.. Officer, where does my mem
Der sit?" he asked pleadingly. by gum,
I'm so mixed up when get up there that
| don't know my own name"
What is your members name-what is
his State? Is he Republican or a Dem
ocrat?
''Thunderation." and the man fairly
gasped. why. everyb body in the State
knows Blank Blank. Why. he's most as
big as the Governor, and he knows a sight
more. He's one Of the best stump speak
ers that Mckinley had in his campaign"
ooh. then he is Republican. Um um-
er-here you are. Mr. Blank Blank. right
hand side OF the House facing the
Speaker, third aisle-blank row, near the
second cloak-room door" And having
fired the information at the stranger, who
seemed to be getting all the time more be-
wildered, Lieut.. Jones dragged two men
and young woman back from the main
door. and ordered them to stand aside for
Senator Pettus, who, uniike most of the
Senator'S, once in long time makes a
foray OH the House. ; oo
~. g
The stranger went up to the gallery
again. and watched impatiently for a sight
of Mr.. Blank Blank. He knew that his
member Of Congress would not refrain
from giving the Post Office Department a
big piece of his mind in the discussion of
the bill then before the House, and he
was all eagerness to hear those clarion
tones, and see that jaunty. finland. taxi
ing. yet positive manner, in which his be-
loved member OF Congress settled all dis
puted questions. He felt Giiite sure that
after Mr.. Blank Blank spoke they might
as we'll shut up shop for the rest Of the
day, as there would be nothing else to
say. and the House would be ready for a
vote. }
Presently the Chairman of the Commit
tee on Post Offices and Post Roads
yielded some time to somebody, and then
the Speaker droned ont 1.-THE gentleman
from Blank is recognized for two minutes"
Then up got Mr.. Blank Blank, and in
q weak, little, far-away voice, began to
read hurriedly from pile Of manuscript
which he held in his hand. At the expi-
ration of the two minutes Mr.. Blank Blank
asked for five minutes more, but Mr..
Overstreet declined to yield. so he asked
permission to extend his remarks in the
Record, which was granted. and then he
sat down, in the midst Of the most pro-
found silence. g.
woes into the ears OF Lieut.. Jones. why,
blame it ALL" he declared wrathfully," ont
our way we thought Blank Blank was run
ming the whole business. We get the Con-
gressional Record land he has n speech in
almost every day, on something or other.
and | come down here allowing that he
was the biggest toad in the puddle. Now
see how he gets them in. Leave to
print Why, thunder. he amt knee-high
to a grasshopper along with the other fell
lows in this House. Two minutes! Two
whole minutes! Now. wouldn't that frost
you! Two minutes for the big - Dis
trict but, then, that was long enough time
for such speech as Blank Blank made.
Pm going home and resign. that's what
I'm going to do" And he went off NUT
tering 1.-TWO minutes! Well, by gum!'
The House Committee on Military AT
fairs has agreed to enlarge Chickamauga
National Park by the acquisition Of 10000
acres of land, which will cost 100000. 1t
has also agreed to sites for four perma-
nent Military Camps. The camp sites Sc
lected are:
At or near Fort Sam Houston, Bexar
County, Tex, where from 1900 to o.
GOO acres are to be acquired at cost Of
$125, 200.
Camp Douglas, in Juneau and Monroe,
Counties, Wis, 10000 acres, at cost Of
100000.
Conewago Valley in Lebanon, Dauphin
and Lancaster Counties, Pa, $4,000
acres, at cost OF 100000.
The J. N. Henry ranch. San Luis.
Obispo County, CAL, $4,000 acres, at a
cost of 100000.
The bill provides that no permanent
military post shall be established on any
of these sites.
80 sh,4a
Three midshipmen were dismissed from
the Naval Academy last Fan for hazins.
The friends of these young hazers have
been moving heaven and earth to have
them reinstated. but finding 1T impossible,
had n Snpcial hill introdis6atFi In fSnnoras,