New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1904-12-29
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

That ancient bulwark or Anglo-SaXon JuStlCe' lIe
grand jury is to be abolished in Minnesota A
constitutional amendment for that purpose received
121 900 majority at the recent election. Minnesota
IS the first place in the Anglo-SaXon world TO do
away with the time honored institution. Perhaps
the large percentage Of Scandnavians in the states
population may have much to do with the weaken
ing hold which the Saxon instrument of justice has
upon the Einnesotans. The grand Jury Is an anti
quated institution, being in practice almost COM
pletely subordinated to the prosecuting attorney
but the suggestion to abolish 1t would give shock
to the people Of New-York.
THE JAP IMMACULATE.
Besides food and ammunition Japs9.so knapsaeks CON
ManchuTiaMWar Letter.
An, neat JapanI Each week we hear
New, reasons Why your hosts are strong.
They never start the day awrong.
When bugles wake at break OF day.
And morning gflds the Eastern lands
Your troopers hasten, straightaway
10 some sweet stream and wash their handA
That done. before the cannons boom.
And sword and bayonet leave the sheath,
Possessed OF ample elbow room.
They kneel in files and brush their teeth
Then crashl Tho sounds of war begin
To give his foe an early scare
The Cossack tries, but midst the din
The Jap. unfustered. combs his hair.
And last before he bangs reply
He spreads his map Where er P' It's G dry
And finds exactly where he is.
"Our language" said John Sharp wIliams Of
Mississippi. the Democratic leader Of the House in
THE Buffalo Commercial" 'is certainly susceptible
Of much mutilatiCn. I recall a statement made
by one of the hands on my plantation that
consider the most ungrammatical combination Of
words ever heard. l had sent for him to do
something about the house. Half an hour later
he slouched up to me and said: Mr. williams I'm
go busy out yonder 1 come down to say CANT
came, " Huh! put IN Representative Clayton, of
Georgia. That's not In II with the remark a
waiter made to me In an Atlanta restaurant
I asked for some beef and he brought me q
well done piece. See here said. 4 want soma
rare oeef-underdone. you know Can't get it,
said the waiter. We amt got none that's no IN
derdoner.'"
at college; was 1t from playing football?
Tiger. - ''"oe'0''
The Fulton RanD Gazette" reports that min
lister Of that town moved by the grief or
n husband whose wife was to be buried and soppb+
to commiserate him In the following manner: NV
brother. know that this is great grief that has
overtaken you, and though you are compelled 10
mourn the loss of this one who was your COM
panion and partner in life I would console YOU
with the assurance that there is another who syn-
pathizes with you and seeks to embrace you In
the arms of unfalng love" To this the bereaved
man replied by asking. as he gazed through tears
into the minister's face, What's her manner"
FEvENGEI
1.-THE Dutch for motor car is reported to be ..Sne,l
aardeooszoondeerspoorweGpit
There's gentleman who's Dutch;
He is walking with erptch:
And he's apt to lose his hair
II II you ment Ihn,o pray at take care.
Observation-Disclosures.
For this Dutchman Ohy the wav
BY dixie walked fine day
Smoking pipes. was alone
Calm, he shifted the humid air.
Till 1t came and caught him fair
SnellpaaId eloOsZoondeer-
Spoorwegpitroolrijtung
Now, he's busy sowing tacks
On the roadway every night,
Passing chauffeurs to alright.
One word brings him from his Lair
Vogue, - he mutters Ia galere''-
Observation-Disclosures.
-London Chronicle.
Neatly Put.-Teacher-What Is the dirererce
Tommy. between local trains and express trains?
Tommy "a bright bow who knows all about the
subway)-Local trains stop at the stations and
express trains stop between stations.
Human nature is a funny mix-upI The average
man and woman seem TO be made up. for good
they especially enjoy turning them loose.
chairs at home is the who complains most
about the hard seats on the train.
The woman who inds most fault II she ever doss
have TO stand is the who. when the opportu-
nifty comes. expects to occupy two or three seats
with parcels,
The man who loafs away three-quarters OF his
time is the one who is the most unreasonaby inn
patient II the train is few minutes late.
The woman who hates children Is the one who
thinks Il brutal that she isn't permitted take her
dog into the chair car.
The who "eats around at the S cent res
taurants is the surest kicker In the dining car
The man who is in a business that considers go
cent profit legitimate is the one who walls loud
est about extortionate fares
The woman who lives In four-room fat is the
one who finds most fault with the close Quarters OF
the slsspins car.-Four-Track News.