The Birmingham age-herald., 1904-03-04

lHE -AG It. u Admiral Dewey is not saying word. He sees that the woods are full of na- val strategists Torpedoes are leading airships in the Russo-Japanese war.
 -----.a---- n Cleveland, O., a single blow on the arm is not enough to get a divorce, but a blow on the head with brick is very effective.
 Sir Thomas hpton continues to sell tea at the same old stand and Is malz- ing enough money to lose another yacht race.
 St. Louis begs to state that she can pull off very creditable fair without borrowing the Liberty bell from Phila- delphia.
 The Chinese bandits are busy and are making the best of their opportuni- ties in these parlous times in the far east.
 The poultry trust Is now running a close race with the egg trust, while the people stand by and pay the price
 
 The very fact that frogs have never been stolen by negroes should be proof conclusive that they are not poultry
 ---z--------- The late winter is to go down in his tory as record maker. It was not pipe-buster in this latitude.
 ------------ The Judge Parker boom may yet be dug up from the morass which covers it, and galvanized into life According to certain critics strenu- ousness and extravaganza go hand in hand in the White House.
 
 The Koreans fight with bows and arrows. Such weapons are slightly primitive and out of date.
 
 King Leopold has not yet had tho pleasure of meeting American chorus girls on their native soil. The Russians and Japanese clash" nearly every day now, if press reports are to be trusted.
 Emperor William is going to Gibral- tar, but he will not carry it back home in his pocket.
 Mayor Mcclellan is engaged in screwing t.le lid on Harlem, figurative- ly speaking.
 MT. Schwab seems to think Monte Carlo is as easy as the guileless lambs in America.
 Germany has steel trust of her own and is rapidly getting in line with America.
 --s~-- Pig iron Is cheaper, but 1t is not eatable and rarely finds a place on menus.
 Only diplomats have right to have sore throats at all times without no- tice.
 MT. Bryan is expected to break him self of the as-City-platform habit.
 ---s-- Dowie's retreat in Australia is not exactly ideal even for third Elijah.
  The song writers are studying the banks of the Yalu far away.
 
 Port Arthur will soon feel like Paris during the German siege. The Siberian blizzards are no re- specters of contestants.
 
 This is springtime and St. Patrick's day is near at hand.
 Cotton is not to be kept down while Sully is about.
 The only hope for Prof. Triggs is to write book.
 Winter has decided to play return engagement.
 Japan in Korea Is the cat that ate the canary
 h0SidIu uOiiS3 llo iethu SidpDiAto in Thibet.
 MT. Machen pleads everything but insanity.
 
 Has Peculiar Accident Selma, March 3.-(Special) )-Mr. c. s. Westbrook, an employe at the Southern railway shops in this city. met with painful accident today. He was at work at his bench when piece of iron flew out of vice and struck a file laying partly on the edge of the bench. The file flew up when struck and the sharp end cut MT. westbrook in the eye, the tear duct being severed His friends hope that he will not lose his eye.
 AT MALONE THEY MAKE EGGS. From a Malone, N. Y, Dispatch. The scarcity and high price of eggs has