Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1904-06-04
HE WAS AN EASY MARK

OoCtOTS ana lawyers see queer tuanSS'
remarked q professional man the other
evening as he pufYed at his post-prsndial
cigar. most OF which 90 to prove that
there Is nothing new under the sun unless
1t Is g recently elected member of Con-
gress. When he is new he Ia at times as
wide as church door and as wooliy an a
Persian lamb. but he has q large heart ana
a perfect willingness to expend his breath
on anything, from the inoffensive gas bur-
mel to the chiefs OF the various depart
ments. He Is. moreover blessed with a
confidence in his fellow man that nothing
can shake except perhaps the experiences
of his first session. and then he Is apt to
return to his 'deestric:' and constituents
sadder. although wiser. man.
"A perfect type of this class walked Into
my office last winter" continued the doc
tor. "a man who was redolent of the farm,
and who possessed all the earmarks or the
southwest developed to a degree that IS
seldom seen east Of the Mississippi river.
His Sclothes belonged to the section or the
country in which he had been reared. ana
there was nothing remarkable in his Single
breasted black frock coat. In regard 10 It's
cut or in the manner In which he wore II:
Unlike old Grimes. 1t was not all buttoneo
down before. but was merely fastened at
the waist in the characteristic southern
manner. while the collar. besides being dec
GRATED by the usual traces OF grease on tn9
edges, was diversified by an occasional
dash of dandruff here and there. The rest
of the garment was literally covered with
chicken feathers which gave him the ap-
rearance of a tropical bird in the acute
stages of moulting. while one eye was
closed by a mass of swollen and discoloreu
tissue. The knuckles OF the hands, winch
were. unknown to me. sway1ng the roo Oh
empire were bruised and battered ana gave
every indication of a personal contact with
something heavier than the tradltional
scepter. while the palms were more blister
ed than could be accounted for by even
tight grip on the reins of government.
when the eye had been dressed and at
tended to he asked for the amount of the
fee. and feeling that it was just as well TO
adhere to the usual rates when there was
no prospect OF any reward gave MIN
the figures that I should have charged had
I known at the time that he really was
member Of Congress. To my surprise ne
took out a leather wallet. and undolng the
strap he wearied his stiffened fingers and
DE- Zzled my interpreting eyes by turning
over a mass of yellow-backed bills In his
efforts to find one small enough to meet
my demands. This having been done, he
picked up his PREDETERMINED hat and
started for the door. There he fingered and
fldgeted with his flamboyant cravat, then
he stopped down and pulled up soiled
white sock that had inverted itself over
the top of his prunella cloth shoe. Finally
he carefully closed the door, and returning
to my desk said in a hoarse interrogative
whisper: Doc. you have lived here many
more than cared to count. Well he con-
tinued, you have known many public char
acters Do you think Chauncey Depew Is
an honest mann The question staggered
me, but I assured him that the political
reputation of the honorable gentleman
rested on secure and solid foundation
as some of his jokes. Oh he interrupted,
I know his record, but do you think he
would give me back my watchT
II looked at him with apprehension, to
see II the blow that he had evidently re-
ceived had affected his brain and rendered
him liable to decorate his hair with straws
and claim to belong to a royal family. but
his face was perfectly serious and his one
eye was clear and alert. How did he get
your watch? demanded. and what do you
mean? Well he said. when 1 first came
east went to York city, and at the sugges-
ton of the hotel man L took in show at
a theater a roof. 1t was very hot and
I was tired OF being alone, when a gen.
tleman sat down next to me and asked If
he had not seen me in the south? told him
that l had just been elected to Congress
and that he may have met me when l was
on the stump. He said that he remember
ed 1t perfectly. and that his name was
Hackett-Mr. Recorder Hackett. We had
some beer and sat for a while when he
suggested that as 1t was very warm we
should go and have a Turkish bath
AS we walked along the roof Sena tor
Depew Joined him, and introduced to
him. He said he did not care to bathe
but would go there with us anyway AS
we walked along he told us how he had
been robbed at bath in London, and
when we arrived he agreed to wait for
and keep our watches and money. I sup
pose were longer than we thought and
that the senator had grown tired of wait
ing. for he had gone when we came out.
Mr.. Hackett said that he could get the
things in the morning, and we parted he
gave me his card and address. / was
called away by telegraph before breakfast,
SO 1 wrote to Mr.. Hackett to send them
by express, but 1 have never heard from
him since
4" Well I said there is a good deal Of
doubt in the minds of some New Workers..
particularly in those of the criminal classes
as to what Mr.. Hackett's present address
Is. Where did he tell you to write? Again
the plethoric wallet was produced and from
a side pocket he fished out a dirty, thumb
marked card, on which was written. Mr..
Recorder Hackett, Hotel Waldorf Room
41l44.' Then he added, Perhaps he never
still have the watch. Do you think If I went
and explained 1t to him that he would give
it back to me?'
knowing that the man would never be-
lfeve in the senator's innocence without a
personal interview, and feeling that Mr.
Depew would be the better off, at least by
a new after-dinner story, L gravely assured
him that he would undoubtedly be glad to
return the watch to him, if it were still in
his possession.
do not know but as the former evidently
belonged to the class that Mr.. Reed once
described as being in Congress for two
years and catching everything that was
going around but the Speakers eye, and as
there has been no report of any affection in
have prevented this particular joint con-
ference of the Senate and the House.
Raadinp as n Cure for Sickness