The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1904-05-19

returned with a gourd-dipper full of
the cooling liquid.
"Ah-h-h! Mighty thin. Ned" said
the Auditor, as he gulped it down.
Eyes, sab, deed it is, boss. but it's
de bes' you kin expect out'n dat Put
nam county goad dippah."
In his Office Mr.. Rounder never kept
glass for drinking purposes. He
thought the gourd would be more
popular with his country constituency.
And SO it was; a1d the people went
home and talked about the uncontami
mated democracy OF plain Billy KOun-
der, who drank his ice-water out OF
gOurd.
Mr.. Blunt had picked up morning
paper in the meantime. and was
glancing over the headlines.
The Auditor settled Ills avQrdilpois
back into mis- chair and was manifest
ly preparing for another exertion.
'Now, Benjamin" said he, my fell
low Christian traveller to the judg-
ment bar o. God, when you come to a
period, we'll get ready to proceed.
Whet up your peEcil there, and Well
send in a few lines to the Ephesians.
Ready?"
Mr.. Blunt said that he was.
"I'll declare! said the Auditor ex-
citedly, II aimed to get my beard de-
capitated as came through iovn this
morning. Now, let's see The board
meets at ten, don't it. The sun, moon
and stars may vary, but we never do.
Well, I'll have time. Take this letter
first. Are you ready 2"
The secretary again responded that
he was
Mr.. Rounder then grasped letter
to which he intended TO dictate re-
ply, first trying to read 1t upside
side, and then inside out roaring at
the same time. in voice loud enough
to fairly shake the fl foundations OF the
capitol, couplet from his fayorite
dftty: -. =
ssThe mother was chasing her son
round the room
Chasing her son round The roOm."
At last finding the address he so
violently sought, he exclaimed:
LET 'er go, Blunt. oh, yes,
didn't give you the address, did +?
Ready?'
Iii. Blunt again said that he was
ready, and the dictation began:
Dear Mr.. Clodgett:-'
Hold on, there, Ben!--wait min
ute; tear that up. Now, ready?"
And then, after taking another deep
breath. an expression of detcrmina-
tion in his face, and with the air of
a strong man about to run a race, he
gathered his wits for supreme eff
ioit, and dictated, without struggle,
the following letter:
"Hon. j. H. Clodgett, Gen. Sol. Wa
bash R'y Co., st. Louis, Mo.-near Mr..
Clodgett: Yours of the 18th inst. re-
ceived, containing pass from here to
Buffalo and return for myself and 26
friends, for which please accept
thanks. I await an opportunity to
reciprocate. Command me at your
pleasure With every assurance OF my
high regard fe. YOU personally. | am.
your friend, VIM. ROUNDEk.
And then, with a final gasp, he ex-
claimed: Hold up, there-Bcn! don't
rut the signature on; I'll sign IL N.Y.
self" So saying. he sank back into
his chair, from sheer exhaustion, and
lighted a fresh cigar
Ai,eT an interval OF recuperation he
again turned to his secretary. declar-
Ing. as he tossed the remaining letters
over TO Mr. Blant.
Nov. Ben. must have my beard
amputated, and you can look after
this mail as wei. as |. There's one
tLfic from the Frlsco-look that up
ior him. and give aim what he wants:
and here's blamed fool wanting to
know something about taxing fran
chlacs as high as farm lands--you'd
better refer him to the attorney gen
eral--and. hold ON: wat minute:
wish you would please acknowledge
eceiLt ol that frank from the Wells
tarko. and thank lin for ": and then
just drop little note To the Western
Union, and cncloae 'em my empty
complimentary stamp book. and ask
en- 10 rcplenish II for me~~won't you.
please. sirf Now you attend to that.
Hon. and III make thee ruler over
many citiss I've got % Eo and get
..xC xan "A c<xsw.<l - flflI&-.xI ~ a.