The Nezperce herald. (Nezperce, Idaho) 1900-1957, 1904-09-29
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A,3zss1oeEN

ttNPoiNN Deuaus the uiAt huuOiuD
; bobolist who runs over me will be sor
ry for II. ORR bet yez." why 7
"Ofye q can ay nitroglycerin IN liver,
ocket."-llfe.
Local 0racle-Know Z Dock O
Biankshiref Ay. | dare says | know
i'm better than any one In these parts
Woy. my darter married one o. is sta
BILE ands."-seraps.
1T serves her good and right" How
nowr' 'sbe became engaged on Fri
day and married on the 18th" "weliY
We'll. now she can't get a dlyorcer-
New York Evening Sun.
she-so you think that men are
smarter than women. do your He
Some men. but hot all. She-Well
what men are smarteri He-Old bach
elors.-iliusfrated Bits
What do you put on your face after
shafingY asked tie man who smelisi
OF bay rum. Court plaster. usually
replied the nervous ehsp. gloomliy.-
Cincinnati Commercial Tribune.
Does your little girl know how 10
spelir' -oh. dear no. That's SO Pile
belan. and we expect her 10 marry a
man who is rich enough 10 lei her
have an amanuensls "-chicag0 Post
Have you heard about the latest in
surance company NO: what Is ltY'
why. It's one that promises TO pay all
mony TO both parties in case the mar
rage proves a failure "--Detroit Free
Ppess-
Miss yane-Some one told me to-day
that | was the hsndsomesi girl IN our
street Miss speiix-oh. that's not in
durable. Miss yane-what do you
meant Miss spei,z-Your habit OF
talking 10 YOURSELF
Barter-we had some nne music at
the concert last night Csrtcn-l
thought you didn't enjoy bigh-class
music. Bax,er-oh. didn't enjoy IL:
that's why I know II must have been
high ciass.-isosion Transcript
Augustus tno longer the youthful
Well. there's one comforis they say AT
10 a man ls either a fool or q pbysi-
clan. Angelina tneariy swallowing a
yssnl-ADd are you a physician. theul
Augus,ns-No. Angellna-oh,
us~d 10 ii.--Tommy was visiting a
neirhbora AT dinner the hostess apoi-
ogiEed TO him because the table linen
was soiied at his plate. oh that's
nothing" be assured Der. promptly:
'ours 10 worse'n that at home
Brooklyn Life.
That land said the city nephew. ia
valued At $500 a from, foot '-Tbun- 4
dcrafion.- exclaimed the old farmer.
hastily moving back on 10 the side I
walk And | stood on II mos; eve
minutes. DO you reckon they'll charge |
me renty'-chlcago Post
Among a number Of notes received
By a teacher In excuse Cor the absence
was the following: -Dcar Teacher: 1
Kindly excuse Minnie Tor having been I
sbscn; yesterday. az she fell In the
mud on her way 10 school by doins
he same. you win obiigc. Her Mother
They had becn engaged long time.
md Que evening were reading the
PAPER together. Look. look be ex-
stained. .oniy aftecn dollars for a sui;
" cloihes.- lis II wedding Saity'
he asked. looking naivcly At her lover.
oh. no. be replied. 1T Is business
Iult- "well. | meant business SIZE
'cplied-
A military officer went downtown
With his little daughter one morning.
sc,ore long the little lady found herself
lnabic TO keep up with her fathers
wingins stride. and she wzs Obliged TO
~ a halt please. pa" she said. Il
would like you not 10 walk 50 fast.
or can't keep up with you. Can't
gu walk nice and slow like a police
nanr'
"A woman can't keep secret" de-
lares the mere man. -o.h, | don't
now" reiorts the nuuery woman;
i've kept my age secret since ! was
l." yes: but one OF these days you
an give II away. In time you win
mply have to tell H." "we,l. think :
rat when a woman has kept secret !.
,r twenty years she comes pretty near :,
moving how to keep lt"-Judge. :
During the late Boer war. just after L
,e fall Of Bloemfontein. soldiers were c
illed upon. owing to the scarcity OF !,
VILLAINS, to work the railway. The "
cary men were lying In camp one Il
ght. after a hard day's work. when a I.
.rgeant called out: ANY OF you wish 81
put your name down ss railway por- a
n, drivers. stokerx. guards. or any ri
her appointment connected with the Al
,lwayr' The silence was broken only @
; SHORES. Then one CT the men slow 81
raised his head. put me down az 10
sleeperr' he shouted drowsily. n
A curious and amusing mixture OF Il
riy piety and worldlincss came to NJ
rht In a city school room one day
hen the teacher had asked the chill.
en- to write on their pads OF paper ~,
about the profession or oc- =,
patton In which they would like to
gage when they became men and =,
omen. One little girl wrote briefly
( effectively, Il would desire to be 49,
iy rider Mt a circuss II II was the
rd's will" Another little rir with ~