davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1904-03-10
The tn blea Turned.

A story is told of a high Indian off
Ger who was in the habit of soundly
thrashing his servants when they dis
pleased him. One day he ordered his
khansamah to go to summer house in
the compound and wait for him there,
presently turning up with a heavy
horseWhip. He then addressed the of
fender:
"Now, you scoundrel, I've got you in
q place where no one can hear, and I'll
just thrash you within an inch of your
life!''
The servant, though man Of power
full physique, squirmed, native-like.
"Sah, you sure no one can hearY'
eyes, you scoundrel I've brought you
here on purposev'
'Then, sab, I think I thrash your
And he did it SO thoroughly that his
master was not visible for a week.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1904-03-10
CHINESE PROVERBS.

A vain woman is to be feared, for
she will sacrifice all for her pride.
A woman without children has not
yet the moss precious Of her jewels.
A naughty woman stumbles, for she
cannot see what may be in her way.
A woman DESTROYS of being seen by
men is not trustworthy Fear her
glance.
Respect always a silent woman.
Great is the wisdom Of the woman
that holdeth her tongue.
Trust not the woman that thinketh
more of herself than another. Mercy
will not dwell in hel, heart.
A mother not spoken we'll Of by her
children is an enemy of the state. She
should not live within the Kingdoms
wall.
A woman that respects herself is
more beautiful than a single star:
more beautiful than many stars at
night.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1904-03-10
Crops, Gizzards and Stomachs.

Insects are oddly constructed atoms
Of animated nature, as a rule, and it
depends altogether on the species as
to internal makeup. In bees the crop
is called the honey bag" Insects with
mandibles usually have a modified
form of the "gizzard' so typical in the
common barnyard fowl. In some cases
this miniature "gizzard' is a perfect
wonder shop, it's inner surface being
provided with pads covered with
'horns" and "bristles" in great profu-
sion. The grasshopper's "gizzard' is
lined with innumerable rows OF teeth,
very minute, Of course, but well devel-
oped, true teeth, nevertheless. The
same may be said of crickets and other
insects of that ilk.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1904-03-10
The Humorous Suabians.

'NeXt to the Americans" said Max
Nordau, II think that the Suabians are
the most humorous people in the world.
A Suaban if he has nothing funny to
say keeps silent. Stupidity is unknown
among this race.
Zone night in Suabia in my early
youth [ called on a Suabian maiden
She was very pretty. Perhaps l stayed
longer than l should. Suddenly. at any
rate, the young girls mother called in
a loud voice from upstairs:
"'Gretchen. Gretchen
eyes, II )ther' Gretchen answered.
"'Gretchen, it is very cold here. Will
front door from the outsider"
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1904-03-10

An eminent scientists estimate of
the age of the world is mot so great
as 100000 years, possibly as little as
2O,OOO,o00 years, probably 100000
years" AS not even the greatest sci
entists have been able to find out with
in 100000 or 15,0O0.0O0 years how
old Mother Earth is. it must be con-
fessed that she keeps the secret of her
age quite as well s.s do her charming
daughters. The scientists may at last
come to the conclusion that, like the
others. she is ''only as old as she
looks. Baltimore Sun.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1904-03-10
Anxious Moments.

Some OF the most anxious houvs OF
! mothers life are those when the
little ones OF the household have
Group. There is no other medicine
30 effective in this terrible malady az
~oley's Honey and Tar. It is .
. ,~ehold favorite for throat an6,
lung troubles, and as it contains no
opiates or other poisions, il can be
safely given. Sold by Frost ! Spies.
There il no. cough medicine %
popular = Folsy's Hosey and Tar.
Il contains no opiatea or ppisons aad
asvsrI fails 70 cure. Sold By, Eross 4
Spies. 1865,
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1904-03-10
A Puzzle Worth Rayna

DR.. G.. G. Green, of Wood b ury,
New Jersey, whose advertisement
appears in our paper regularly, will
mail to any one sending two ce3t
stamp to pay postage, one of his
new German Syrup and August
Flower Puzzles, made of wood and
glass. 1t amuses and perplexes
young and old. Although very diff
cult, it can be mastered. Mention
this paper.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1904-03-10
Always Had 1t.

"Has your husband a birthmark or
anything Of that kind by which he
may be identifed?' asked the detec-
tive.
The deserted wife reflected a mo-
ment
eyes, SIR" she said "He has a sort
was born with him, guess. Chicago
Tribune.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1904-03-10
An UnaeIfish Husband.

Conjurer pointing to his cabineD-
Ladies and gentlemen, now call your
attention to the great illusion Of the
evening. will ask any lady in the au-
dience to step on the stage and enter
the cabinet. I will then close the door.
When 1 open 1t again, the lady will
have disappeared, leaving no trace.
Husband Ito his wife)-Matilda, my
love, do oblige the gentleman and walk
up.-London Telegraph.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1904-03-10
Rasped.

"Do you shave yourself very closer"
said the barber.
'sNot very" said the victim. II usu-
ally leave enough skin to fasten the
court plaster on, but of course you
DIDN'T know that before you began.
Cincinnati Times-Star.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1904-03-10
Ready For 1t.

Professor Longhair-It has been dem
onstrated beyond question that this
continent is sinking. Miss De Style
Oh, well, we've got yacht.-New York
Weekly.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1904-03-10
E.s Theory.

TT is better TO rule by love than
fear said the gentle philosopher.
Yes" answered Senator Sorghum;
] II 81 peoples love Of money that has
mads Hfs eany fos M" WashinrtoA.
1ta,. 80.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
SOAKED IN COFFEE.

Until Too Stiff to Bend Over.
when l drank coffee 1 often had
sick headaches. nervousness and bill
iousness much of the time but about
years ago I went to visit a friend
and got in the habit of drinking Pos.
tum.
II have never touched coffee since
and the result has been that 1 have
been entirely cured of all my stomach
and nervous trouble.
MY mother was just the same way,
we all drink Postum and now have
never had any other coffee in the
house for two years and we are all
well.
"a neighbor of mine, great coffee
drinker, was troubled with pains in
her side for years and was an invalid.
She was not able to do her work and
could not even mend clothes or do
anything at all where she would have
to bend forward. If she tried to do
little hard work she would get such
pains that she would have to lie down
for the rest of the day.
II persuaded her atsslast to stop
drinking coffee and try Postum Food
Coffee and she did SO and she has
used Postum ever since; the result
has been that she can now do her
work, can sit for whole day and
mend and sew on the machine and
she never feels the least bit of pain
in her side. in fact she has got well
and it shows coffee was the cause OF
the whole trouble.
Il could also tell you about several
other neighbors who have been cured
by quitting coffee and using Postum
in Its place" Name given by Postum
Co., Battle Greek, Mich.
Look In each pkg. for. the famous
little book, THE Road to Wellville."
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
The Sons Explanation.

Judge e. H. Gary, chairman of the
executive committee of the steel trust,
used to live in the Illinois town of
Wheaton.
Zone day in Wheaton" Judge Gary
said recently. II took dinner with a
clergyman and his family. The clergy
man had an eight-year-old son called
Joe, and Joe, was very bright boy.
Look here, Joe,' said during the
course of the dinner, 4 have question
to ask you about your father
Joe looked gravely at me.
"'All right; III answer yuor ques.
tion,' he said.
"-'Well,' said I, I want to know if
your father doesn't preach the same
sermon twice sometimes?'
Yes, I think he does,' said Joe.
but the second time he always hollers
in different places from what he did
the first time. New York Tribune.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05

al nurse, Of 16 Jane ST., Paterson, N. j..
says: II have not only seen much suf-
fering and many deaths from kidney
trouble, but have suffered myself. At
one time thought I could not live.
Ny back ached. there were frequent
headaches and dizzy spells, and the
kidney secretions were disordered.
Doan's Kidney Pills helped me from
the first. and soon relieved me entire
ly Of ali the distressing and painful
symptoms"
A FREE TRIAL of this great kid
ney medicine which cured Mrs. Brown
will be mailed on application to any
part Of the United States. Address
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y. For
sale by all druggists; price so cents
per box.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
BROTHER MINISTER'S REFUSE TO
PERFORM THE MARRIAGE
CEREMONY.
AssAIls HIS PARIsnIoNtRs
SENDS LEMON TO ONE HE JlLTs
AND HAS CLOSE CALL FROM
VIOLENCE.

Sioux City, Iowa, May unable
to get a brother minister in the town
of Akron, Iowa, to perform his mar
riage ceremony, the Rev. James B..
Lemon, aged forty, hired the opera
house, secured Justice Of the Peace
Kidd to tie the knot, invited all who
would behave, roasted the populace
after the ceremony, and vanished
with his fifteen-year-old bride before
a threat of mob violence could be car
ried out.
Mr.. Lemon has been pastor of the
Christian church at Akron for eight
months, and although it was suspected
he intended to marry maiden lady of
his own age, and a church worker, he
suddenly turned his attentions to
Pearl Sullivan, daughter Of Mrs. Ann
Sullivan.
Two weeks ago the minister an
nonnced from his pulpit that he would
marry Miss Sullivan.
Roasts His Critics.
Assailing his critics from the stage
he declared that their idea of Chris
tian forbearance and brotherly love
was a hollow mockery and for their
devilish opposition to his holy purpose
of taking wife they would certainly
be punished by a higher court.
He wound up his harrangue b ycall-
ing boy to him and giving him some
money, with insfructions to go to the
store and buy Miss So-andSo lemon
the woman mentioned being the
maiden lady he was supposed at first
to be wooing.
He considered this very funny, but
it only enraged the people, and but for
his quick disappearance in carriage
he had standing at the rear door OF
the theater he would have been rough
ly handled. He, claimed he was going
to Eldora, Iowa. His antecedents are
| unknown.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
cuRTAILs TEACHERS FUN.

School Board Bars Them From Amuse-
ments Five Nights Week.
Manitowoc, Wis, May 1. = Because
they are alleged to spend too much
time in attending amusements the
members of the North side high school
faculty were given formal notice by
the school board that in the future no
teacher must attend theaters, parties,
balls or receptions on any evening Of
a school week excepting Friday or
Saturday.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
A Suitable Hint.

tits curious, mighty curious" OBJ.
served Mr.. Slypurr, as he picked up
his overcoat, 'how some lucky fellows
get reputation without half trying.
Look at Job. for instance as a syno-
nym for patience"
''Why, wasn't he tried to the limit of
endurance" cried the shocked Mrs,
Slypurr.
Not much" replied Mr.. Slypnrr,
calmly. at least there's no record Of
his having to struggle with torn
sleeve lining in his overcoat all win
Bazaar.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
Were Easy to Remember.

"If had my way" said real estate
agent, I'D give every house double
address. For instance, No. % West
Twenty-second street, No. 1926 East
125th street, and so on.
II have stack of letters foot high
from physicians and other professional
men who want houses of this sort
They are hard to get, because the sup.
ply is so limited.
"The advantage is that addresses OF
this kind are easy to remember, and
In emergency persons recall in an in.
slant where to find a good doctor, or
a good lawyer, or an eminent engi.
neer. New York Press.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05

Ask Your Dealer For Aliens Foot-Ease,
A powder. 1t rests the feet. Cures Corns,
Bunions, Swollen. Sore. Hot. Callous Aching
Sweating Feet and Ingrowing Nails. Aliens
Foot-Ease makes new or tight shoes easy. AT
all Druggists and Shoe stores. Is cents. Ac-
cept no substitute. Sample mailed FREk
Address Allen S. Olmsted. LIE Roy. N. Y.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
At a Profit.

I'VE are not in danger of any trou.
BILE with our neighbors ARE we?" OBJ.
jected the head of the naval depart
ment of South American republic.
What do we want of lot of new war
vessels?"
ITO sell" answered the head of the
treasury department, who was looking
over the latest map of the war in
Asia.-Chicago Tribune.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
Throws Acid in Nuns Face,

Wheeling, w. Va, May 1. - An I'M
identified man threw carbolic acid into
the face of Sister Of st. Joseph at
the convent here yesterday. The nun
is in critical condition The man APP
piled at the convent for 81 and when
1t was refused him he threw the acid.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
Eire in a WAGON FACTORY.

Racine, Wis, May Ia fire which
started at o'clock last evening in the
Fish Bros. wagon factory, did about
100000 damage, which is covered by
insurance. It originated in the paint
shop. It throws 300 men out Of work.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
Horrible Brute.

What" exclaimed her mother,
you haven't left your husband?"
yes" sobbed the wretched young
wife, "he insulted me--insulted me
horribly"
How? What?"
I'VE were just having littl espat,
and all of a sudden he said: oh. you
women! You're all alike "-Philadel.
phia Press.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
FIRE DESTROYS TOWN.
Nine Tenths of Biggest Place in Crows
Nest Pass District Is Burned.

Vancouver, B. c., May l. = Nine
tenths of Fernie, B. c., town of 5000,
the largest settlement in Crows Nest
Pass district, was destroyed by fire.
Estimated loss, 100000. The water
supply almost failed and the fire
burned itself out. Nearly the whole
of six blocks were destroyed, including
six hotels, two wholesale houses,
Christ church and virtually all the re-
tail stores in town. There were no
casualties.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
Gas Brjnos Death to Farmer.

Grand Forks, N. D., May 1.Thom.
as Folden, aged twenty-five years, liv-
ing with his brother on farm at
Park River. died at Columbia hotel
yesterday, as result OF inhaling gas.
accidentally, it is thought.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
Frederick Drops Dead.

Cincinnati, May William Brod-
erick, the basso VINO has been singing
here with the Francis Wilson COM
pany, dropped dead yesterday at the
Burnette house from heart disease.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
TO PROMOTE ARBITRATION.

Arrangements Completed for lnterna-
tionaI Gathering at Washington.
Washington, May 1. - The Ameri-
can group of the interparliamentary
union for international arbitration
met at the capitol, and Chairman
Bartholdt was authorized to appoint a
committee of ten to make arrange
ments fer the reception and enter
tainment of the foreign delegates who
will attend the meeting to be held at
ST. Louis from Sept. to 19. Congress
appropriated $4,000 for the purpose.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
woMEN's WOES.

Much Of women's
daily woe is due to
kidney trouble. Sick
kidneys cause back
ache, languor, blind
headaches, dizzi-
ness, insomnia and
urinary troubles. To
cure yourself you
must cure the kid
neys. Profit by the
experience of 9TH
ers who have been
cured.
Mrs. William w.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
NABs PosToFFIcE CLERK.
One Charge is Taking $1,000 Package
CONSIGNED to Bank.

Milwaukee, May John A. Fagg,
for many years employed in a registry
branch of the Kansas City postof1ice,
was arrested yesterday by Postoffice
Inspector Mckee. Fagg is said to have
been under two Indictments in Kan
sas City. one Of which charged him
with having taken a package contain
ing $4,000 in money consigned to the
j. P. Bringman company's bank.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
General.


Married teachers have won their
fight for the right to teach in the New
York city schools.
Executive officers of the Western
roads have adjusted the entire sched-
ule Of grain rates. Incidentally, in
trying to settle the graf nrate war, an
other prospective war was started,
which may result in the reduction of
the Iowa grain rates by about one.
third.
Gen. Horatio c. King Of New York,
in speaking at q banquet given Secre.
tary Of the Treasury Shaw by the
Syracuse IN. W chamber of com
MERGE, censured the labor unions for
their policy and blamed the state and
national officers for their leniency in
dealing with them.
Through the accidental finding Of
some papers, Mrs. Nicholas Van Win
kle of Warrenville, N. j., has learned
that she is entitled to share in an es-
tate valued at 100000 left by her
mother, Mrs. Mary Ravens. When but
small child she was adopted and did
not know her real name.
With all simplicity, except the usual
ceremonial Of the Roman Catholic
church, the Rev. Thomas Francis Gu
sack, auxiliary bishop-elect of the arch
diocese of New York, has been conse-
Grated In st. Patrick's cathedral in
New York.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
Outlining the ,maaination

Outlining the imagination.
Little Dorothy, who had been watch
Ing her brother, an amateur artist,
blocking out landscape in his sketch
book, suddenly exclaimed, Il know
what drawing is"
"Well, Dot. what Is it,"
TITS think, and then marking over
the think. Little Chronicle.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05

II you want creamery prices, do as
the creameries do, use JUNE TINT
BUTTER COLOR.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
Now They Don't Sneak.

Mayme-You should induce Jack to
sign the pledge before you marry him.
Edyth-Sign the pledge! Why, he
doesn't drink"
Mayme-No; but he will probably
be tempted to after you are married.
Chicago News.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
BOYS FIRE RUNS AWAY.
Flames Spread to Barn, Burning Five
Cows and a Horse.

Black River Falls, Wis, May 1. -
While boys were burning some leaves
in the Fourth ward yesterday, the fire
got away from them and ran into Hen.
ry Colon's barn, burning it with five
valuable cows, one horse, grain and
many farm implements. The loss on
barn is partly covered by insurance,
but there is nc, insurance on the con-
tents.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05
Jersey Fossil.

"This tusk," said the Jersey com
muter, II dug up in my garden. It's
all Of four feet long. Remarkable,
isn't it?"
Eyes. It's very likely the bill OF a
prehistoric mosquito. Philadelphia
Public Ledger.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05

Mrs. Windows Soothing Syrup.
For children teethnE softens the Rutus, reduces tn
dAmmation sllays PAIN wind collie 25c bottle.
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05

Ids not believe Piso's Cure for Consumps,oa
has m equal for coughs and colds.-JoHH =
DoYHR, Trinity Springs. Ind, Feb. Is, 1900
Pierre weekly free press. (Pierre, S.D.) 1889-19??, 1904-05-05

pleasures
| 8 !; and its
Offset o.
contend
Pd pains,
B means
them ii
ifilng as
risk is
netting
nth con.
g, there.
have a.
! n time.
!. aches
by the
No Well ~
be with.
eAdy for
# pene- e
| carries
Fleets a
painful (.
/, Lun-
Flso in Ii
$, cuts
bat al
insur-
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1904-09-14

But few democrats will now dare at
tack the militarism of either.
Likewise. when Washington estab-
lished the nation with a big stick. "
and Madison defended his country's
rights in 1912. and jackson promised
to hang those who defied the flag, and
Grant drove European invaders out of
Mexico and Mckinley expelled the
Spaniards from Cuba, there We're those
who carped about the dangers and the
per;ls of the "oig stick policy, but
the voters kept right on rolling up big
pluralities. 1t is safe to say that no
president would deliberately lead his
country into needless war. but it is
the business of an executive to uphold
the dignity of his people and command
the respect from the world which is it's
due 10 speak softly but carry d
big stick" was stated over again by
Roosevelt, when he said: THE navy
has been and is now, the most potent
guarantee of peace; and it is such
chiefly because it is formidable, and
ready for use
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1904-09-14

the laborer, no matter in what field of
endeavor he is employed The contin-
ued rise of the American laborer to
higher planes of living can be mater
ALLY aided by an even wider observ-
ance of Labor Day than at the present
time exists. The time should come
when the farmer can feel that he has a
right to join with the artisan on such
occasions, thereby welding together
more closely the common interests of
town and country. The manufacturer
and the employer of labor may also
Well be embodied among that number
who shall pay homage to labor. There
should be no barrier between the two
extremes and a day spent with each
other in associations other than the
workshop should add to the mutual re-
spect for each other.
Let Labor Day be more generally
celebrated. There is no place for cult
or clique in the celebration of such
day and the more people who are gath
cred together observe it, the greater
will be the interest taken in the cause
of la bOr,