The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1904-11-24

sizes: w nat is the difference between
lightning and electricity" And he am
swered: We'll you don't have to pay
for lightning
Wanted Her Wav-Mamma had
found 1t necessary to discipline George
for being naughty one day, and the
usually forgiving nature of the child
was heid IN check until his father came
home when the little boy ran to him
and said: Papa / want you to do
sumpfin for me; l want you to dis
charge mama"
Her Dress-Teacher: Now chill
dren, | told you Yesterday about the
various materials from which your
dresses are made-sill. wool, and cot
ton. Let me see how we'll you remem-
Der. Margie, where did the material
come from of which your dress Is
made?"
Margie-It once grew upon the back
of a sheer"
Teacher: Very good.
And Yours, Blanche?"
Blanche: MY dress once grew
upon the back of a sheep. and a part
of it was spun by a sill<worm."
Teacher: Correct! And yours
Lucy?'
Lucy with evident embarrassment
My dress was made out of an old
one of mammals"
Who are i'm Heaven-A little girl
asked her mother if liars ever went to
Heaven, ana was answered. mo. I
suppose not" She then asked if papa
ever told a lie. Well" said the
mother, Il suppose sometimes he
does" We'll, did you, and grandpa.
and uncle Jim ever tell a lie?" said
the little girl. yes, l suppose some
times i'm our lives we have told what
wasn't exactly true" well" said
the little girl, after deep thought, "l
should think it would be awful lone
some in heaven with nobody there
but Just God and George Washington"
Snbssitute-The mother of a little
fellow who was about taking a ride
in the Hartford street cars, asked him.
as he scrambled in, why. aren't you
going to kiss your mother before you
go?' The little rogue was in such
hurry that he couldn't stop, and hastily
called out Conductor, won't you kiss
mother for me?"
What is il 70 be happy-A little Cir
was asked TO tell the meaning of the
word happy. "TO be happy" she said.
rs TO feel that YOU wanted to give
all your things to your little sister"
Poor Bedfellows-A boy had heard
readings about the Israelitish kings.
He said he wondered why they We're
all SO poor. and when asked for an
explanation said that the history or
every one of the kings of Israel ended
with the expression. land he slept with
his fathers" Now" said he. "if they
had been rich they would have had
beds to themselves
When no mercury went down.
Little Willie from the mirror
Sucked the mercury all off,
Thinking in his childish error.
1t would cure his whooping cough.
At the funeral Willies mother
Smartly said to Mrs. Brown:
'"Twas a chilly day for William.
When the Mercury Went down
Why he was punished--As two ur-
chins were trotting along together. one
of them fell and broke a pitcher he
was carrying. He commenced crying
when the other boy asked him why
he took on SO. Cause" said he,
when 1 get home mother will pun
ish me for breaking the mug. What"
said the other, "Ain't you got no
Grandmother living at your house,"
No" was the reply. well. 1 have
and / might break two mugs. and
they wouldn't punish me-
No Heaven for him-Little Mary
was discussing the great hereafter with
her mamma, when the following en-
sued: ''Mommo, Will you go to Heaven |
when you die?' Yes, / hope so, child" |
well. l hope l will go. too. OF. you'n |
be Lonesome" "Oh, yes, and / nope |
your papa will 90 too "Oh. no.
papa can't go; he can't leave the |
store" |
Papa's way-A mother can call
"Johnnie, it's time to get up" for two |
or three hours without making any
impression. But when the old man
steps to the foot of the stairs ana |
shouts, "John!" Johnnie takes his |
breakfast with the family.
Ali rcady--A SPEAKER addressing d |
laree assembly of Sunday school chill |
dren said, Now. my little boys and |
girls, | want you to be very still-so |
still that you can hear a pin drop"
They We're all silent for a moment, |
when one cried out at the top of her |
little voice, Let her drop!'
Mary's Englisli-Auntie would not
answer little Mary when she used the |
verb ito be- incorrectly. Auntie |
crocheting and busy. "Auntie what's
that going to be?" No answer. Think |
ing that she had fallen down on Ito |
be-" What are that going to be
?" Auntie now silent through
curiosity. What are that going 10
is?" said Mary triumphantly.
Wonldn't enlighten her-Mother ana
little Robert met the Sunday school
teacher on the street. WHO is this
Roberto" the teacher asked, pointing
to herself. No reply. Again the
same question and the same failure to
answer. When the teacher passed on,
mother said, didn't you know her son?
Yes he said, Miss Rosa B. "Well
why didn't YOU tell herr" "Cause
she knew who she was"
The scared Sunda.' school girl
She was teaching about the Resurrec
ton. Now little girls suppose /
should die on Friday and you'd see
me put in the coffin and buried, and
then Sunday morning while you all
were here at Sunday school. l should
walk in. what would you do?" Bright
little girl: I'D run
He had seen the saw dust doll
While mother was bathing her 4-year
olds foot that was cut. the little boy
insisted that she should not wash the
sand out of the place. But it doesn't
hurt you now replied mother, and it
must be washed" mo please don't
wash it out?'' But why not?" BE
cause he walled That's the dust or
the ground that God put in me when
he made me-"
Politeness by prOxy--A baby girl
had been so constantly reminded by
her mother to say Thank you" when
given anything-that once when she
was out with friend who gave her
a new doll, the friend said can't you
9Th hank Won 30 ono - she uuiokly