davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-04-04
THE SOBER FOUNDERS SECRET.
Why He Was Sober and His Compa.
Mons to the Bad

Why He Was Sober and His ccmpa.
Mons to the Bad.
A tall man stood at the bar with
party of friends long after midnight.
He was the only sober one in the
bunch. His steadiness angered the
others. final round of drinks was
ordered The tall man asked for gin.
No gin, said the least drunk of the
others to the bartender, Been trying
to get him full all night Maybe ginli
be only water. Last try. Give i'm
whisky"
Make it whisky. then, said the tall
man.
The sober mans hand carelessly
dropped down to his coat rocket, and
as carelessly was raised to his lips.
Nobody noticed it but the bartender.
After the drinks the tall man put his
companions into cabs and then re-en-
tered the cafe.
What was that you ate just before
you took that drink" asked the bar
tender.
"Raisins, my boy. raisins," said the
customer. They've been my saliva
tion. have been a rounder all my
life. have drunk many men under the
table and have never been seen TO
stagger The secret OF it is that early
in the game learned that raisins
taken into the stomach before a drink
will absorb the alcohol and prevent
1t from exciting the brain. In all my
drinking bouts keep good supply OF
raisins in my pocket. and they have
carried me through grandly. New
York Press.
-----~.
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-04-04
t4ARn AM gLuswE ANIMAL.
Writer Tells of Charm of Hunting
Small Creature.

Writer Tells Of Charm Of Hunting
Small Cre-tGre.
To my notion, there is peculiar
charm about trailing a hare, writes
EDWIN Sandys in February Outing. In
the first place there is superb uncer-
tainty about where you will locate the
beast If il knows whore it Is itself
You find fresh track, and ii wise,
you follow IL in what apparently Is
the wrong direction, and then-well,
you just Keep on following, Some
where. perhaps only few yards to
one side Of where you struck the
track, is the otser end, and. Of course.
a hare. You acquire wisdom concern
inc this small technicality later-pos-
sibly hours later-but that does not of
necessitw spoil tho sport 1t may be
the track is first found in briery
thieket, which hampers all the rising
ground, marking the edge Of great
swampy woodland. II is easy--in fact.
almost too easy. The hare loves
swampy woodland so, of course, he
merely has skipped for tritiing die
tance along the rim, as it were, of the
depression, then gone down and squat
ted uuder some handy log, from
which shelter you will bounce him
within five minutes. Theoretically
this is sound practically ii is 100 to
| shot on an utterly unreliable tip.
Impulse prompts you 10 slant down
toward the swamp at once, to jump
him from somewhere, promptly knock
him over and he done with IT, This
will save useless pottering over fool.
ish tracks, and also some valuable
lime
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-04-04

Tuesday. April 5th, Miss Ida Bentley
will entertain the citizens of Cairo
Here is what some of the critics say.
Robert Collyer-"Your reading is
well worth the remembering long af,
ter You cease to speak. which is a
great thing in a reader"
Dion Boucicaut-"The public need
not know that you brought into my
school ready-made artist, and we
could add little to your sum of sweet
qualities
Bowdoin College-"Her conception
of the meaning and spirit of compo.
tion is truthful and profound."--Jo.
seph Chamberlain. Late President.
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-04-04
BIG MINSTREL PARADE
Elks VIII Show Grand, Gorgeous
Psgeant--Will be a Bril-.
liant Spectacle.

The Elks big minstrel parade today
Is expected 10 surpass anything Of the
kind ever shown in Cairo
II will start from the rear Of the
opera house at 2.3G p. m. out Sixth
street TO Commercial avenue north
on Commercial avenue TO Twentieth
street. ont Twentieth street to Wash
ingion avenue. south on Washington
10 Fourth street. east on Fourth 10
Ohio Levee. thence north to Sixth
street and the opera house
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-04-04
NEWS OF THE RIVERS.
Conditions and Prospects as Shown
In the Government Report--Gen.
eral News.

The Ferd Herold arrived Saturday
might at II o'clock from Memphis and
departed shortly after for St Louis
The Boaz arrived yesterday morn.
ing from the upper Ohio with tow
of coal She passed on to New Or.
leans after dropping fuel barge at
the coal dump. Her tow consisted of
twcntyeight coal barges and five fuel
barges.
The Carrie v left at > p. m for
the lower Mississippi with one empty
barge
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-04-04

Boston has another newspaper. II
appearsd on the streets last week
with circulation figures quoted at
0.000l92. Its advertising rates are
not mentioned, although it announces
that vegetables will be taken in re.
turn for subscriptions" The news
boys at the street corner will not be
found hawking this eight page period
ical, which bears the inviting title OF
The Cabbage Leaf but the box office
AZ the Park theatre of that city
which Is it's seat of pubication-will
probably he overrun with applications.
The Cabbage Leaf. which seems to
have been issued for the benefit of a
hungry public. claims to have been
grown on the cabbage patch and,
according to the date line, il "sprOIts
every leap year. II purports 10 have
been edited by Mr. Bob in his sane
tnm over Deacon Bagby's grocery on
the Cabbage Patch itself. and It Is
Just such village weekly as Mrs.
Wiggs and her neighbors might read.
II contains all the gossip of the Patch,
with editorials. locals, cashion notes.
societp notes. advertisements. miscel'
lany and Just such reading matter as
BELTS this novel conception of a Cab
bage Patch publication. Two lead
ing articles which relate respectively
how il happened that Manager George
Tyler abducted Mrs. Wigs from the
Cabbage Patch and put her in The
"theayter" and how the Hazy-Stub.
bins wedding was celebrated around
the hymeneaI halter" in Mrs. Wigg's
cottage. are written as though they
we're actual newspaper reports of
events, and are full fthe color and
humor of Alice Hogan Rice's original
story.
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-04-04
. - . . o . . @ . .
ADJUSTMENTS. .
- . . . . . . . . o

Tonight, Elks minstrel, at Cairo
opera house,
Tuesday, April 5, Miss Ida Bentley.
at Cairo opera house.
Tuesday, April 5, euchrc party by
ST. Joseph's branch, No, %, c. X. and
l. Of A., X. M. x, c. hall.
April 7, the Bostonians In robin
Hood" at Cairo opera house.
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-04-04
Washington Bulletin.

By Associated Press.
Washington, April 3,--lLLINOlS-
Fair. warmer Monday and Tuesday.
MISSOURl.-Fair Monday and
Tuesday.
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-04-04

The sole topic of conversation In
our city is the Elk's Big Minstrel at
the Opera House tonight. From all
indications all former capacity re.
cords win be broken. those desiring
choice seats are advised to procure
them early. Arrangements have been
made at the box office to handle the
crowd and tedious delays will thus
be avoided. While the show is given
entirely by local talent, under the
direction of the s. A. Grubbs Min
stFel Syndicate. Chicago, the Elks can
assure the public that the perior
nance will he void of the usual anna
tuer characteristics There are many
surprises in store for those who at
tend. The parade leaves the Opera
House promptly at $50 p. m. and
will be the largest and swellest min
strel parade ever seen on our streets.
The curtain goes up promptly at S;l5
O'Clock and the committee requests
that everyone be in their seats on
time. as the opening scene of the show
is a magnificent and gorgeous specta-
Gle, and should not be missed by any
one Seats on sale at $50 a. m. at
Opera House box Office.
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-04-04
Massachusetts Birth Rate.

The birth rate among the foreign,
born in Massachusetts Is 50 per eee
among the 1ative-born il is II
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-04-04
MENU FOR TODAY
Monday, April 4.
Breakfast.

Monday, April 4.
Breakfast.
Fruit
Barley Crystals
Sugar and Cream
Broiled Bacon
LyOnnaise Potatoes
Thin Corn Bread Coffee
Lunch.
Eggs with Cheese PIN Olas
Doughnuts Cocoa
Dinner.
.~ Consomme Royale
Veal Croqlettes
Tomato Sauce
Mashed Potatoes Peas
Parsnip Salad
Waters Cheese
Apple Dumplings
Coffee
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-04-04
Remark Was Dubious.

Senator German of Maryland was
discussing doubtful remark that had
been made In doubtful political sit
uatlon.
Dubious" said Senator German
"A dubious man, dubious remark,
dubious situation. II is all very dubi
ons indeed 1t reminds me Of the
speech a New Bond street tailor made
to a friend of mine who got measured
in London for a pair Of riding
breeches.
This tailor made my friend take of
his trousers. and. kneeling down, he
measured carefully all over first the
right and then the left leg.
Now, he said. getting up, you
may put your trousers on again
"He kept studying my friend mean
while from the waist down.
1T isn't often. sir. he said finally.
that we get leg like yours to ft
There's some credit, let me tell you,
in fitting leg like yours.
Wasn't that dubious?" Senator
German ended. MY friend blushed,
but he, didn't know himself whether
he blushed for pride or for shame -
Buffalo Enquirer.
ssah
.l,tl Another Plagiarism.
THAT was a pleasant afterthought
of YOURS" remarked the old preacher
who had listened TO a sermon by one
OF his younger brethren, when YOU
drew upon the anslogies of nature to
prove the immortality Of the soul"
IAN sfterthought?' said the younger
clergyman, in some perplexity.
"Yes. You thought Of il about 200
years after Socrates"
Good and Sufficient Reason.
Senator Joseph Bailey of Texas was
stopped by Texan in his daily walk
down PENNSYLVANIA avenue:
Senator, Id like a little chat with
Tou." said he.
II do not know you. What can
so?" was the reply.
Il am one of your constituents. and
want a consular job. I've written
fou to send me Moji-"
Indeed. That's thoughtful o, you
Why didn't you say Szze. .Chu-un?"
ii woaid have, Senator" csms
The faltering reply, "if Id only known
ocw to spell it."-New York Times.
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-04-04

After twenty-five years Of indefat-
liable toll and a measure of public
pleasure of rational kind that few
organizations can parallel, The Bos-
tonians are coming back to us with
new luster and a bulky volume of
New York testimony that they never
were in better form than at this mo.
ment. They appear to have entered
on new lease of popularity. while 1t
is the opinion OF all the metropolitan
music critics that their recent per.
formance of Robin Hood in the
Academy of Music were never out.
shone. This Is cheerful autcome Of
quarter of century of devotion to
the public interest in are along the
lines of high ideals Nobody will be
reader TO offer congratulations to
Messrs. Barnabee and Macdonald
than the people of this town, who will
give them renewef welcome when
they come forward at the Cairo opera
house next Thursday night, April 7th
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-04-04
G. T. r

A project Is on foot In Geneva for
the establishment Of aerial excursions
70 view the s-nnmit Of Mount Blanc.
The Cairo bulletin., 1904-04-04

Slang would not be popular if II
latter cannot be whipped into shape.
language.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1904-07-27
GRAND ARMY STIRRED
Camp Fires Blaze with Joy Over
Escape of General BedeII's
War Orderly from a
ParaIytic's Fate.

When Mr.. Ross G. Duffy, Of No. IS
Russell avenue, Nashua, N. FL, was sud-
denly FRUSTRATED by a paralytic shock,
the deepest concern was felt throughout
the town in which he had been promi-
inent official.
Grand Army men were especially So
licitous for in the Civil war Mr.. Duffy
had acted as General Bedell's orderly
while serving with 90. 2, Third regiment,
New Hampshire Volunteer infantry, and
after the war he became a member of
General Foster Post, G. A. R.. and rose
to be department. vice-commander.
The general anxiety felt about him af-
ter his sudden shock in the latter part of
1901, was slightly relieved by the news
that he had come out of state of I'M
consciousness which had lasted for five
days, but as week after week went by
and he made no further progress, one
leg remaining paralyzed, it was con-
cluded that the highly honored veteran
must at best remain cripple for life.
Suddenly to the surprise and delight
of every one Mr., Duffy appeared on the
street in unmistakibly robust health
and was overwh I'D by congratula-
tons and inquii-.
"The regular treatment" said Mr..
Duffy, "didn't do bit of good. 50 far
as my paralyzed leg was concerned. Ny
left leg remained cold and dead. and I
had been too active man to be content
to be housed up with one dead leg If
there was any possible way to cure it.
finally stumbled on help by the merest
chance. I got my clue out of Boston
paper from the story of a war comrade,
John Hunter, of Chico, Cal, who had
been cured~of a desperate attack Of loco
motor ataxia by DIR. Williams Pink
Pills. sent for box Of the pills at
once and in less than a month after
ward /, too, became a perfectly well
man as the results of using them and I
have remained 80 ever since. No more
vertigo, no more trouble with my
stomach, none with my kidneys: in fact,
every organ seems to be doing it's proper
work. / certainly have good reason to
be thankful to DIR. Williams Pink Pills."
These pills are sold by all druggists
throughout the world.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1904-07-27
Only a Printer.

Only printer? His finger tips
Give voice again to 1ong-dead lips,
And from past and hoary age
Recall the words of seer and sage.
No painter he
But line by line he tells the tale
That colors give to canvas pale.
And masters old before US stand
With brush and palette clasped in hand,
So we may see.
With patient toll, while others sleep,
He makes the a-es backward creep,
And knights in armOr ride and fight
For God. my lady. and the right"
No player he
But at the magic of his hands
The curtain rises in all lands,
And actors for a season rage
Their few brief hours upon the stage.
So we may see.
Only printer? His magic trade
Hath all earth's scenes before us laid.
He moves his hands, and to our eye
Come scenes where soldiers fight and die.
A wizard he
For he but waves his hands, and. 10!
The world with knowledge is aglow;
And by the magic of his art
The futures curtain draws apart,
So we may see.
Only printer? His magic spell
Preserves earrh's sweetest story well;
OF how on Ca1yary's cruel tree
The Savior died to make men free.
prophet he
For by his art he makes the Book
Wherein the weary soul may look.
And, looking. see the promise blest
OF home and love and endless rest
Eternity.
TWILL NJ. MAUPIN
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1904-07-27

most fashionable women wore brown
raw silk gown, which neither soils nor
shows dust easily, ard which was made
in a seven gored skirt, the tuck bottom
of which just escaped the deck. The
jauntv little jacket had the fashionable
short flowing sleeve. which fell over the
dainty sleeve of white raw silk shirt
waist. The hat was a brown rough
straw, with strappings of ecru straw
and an ecru cog plume dropped gracefully
over the left side.
Another charming gown for the first
steamer day. and for wear on landing,
was of porcelain blue linen, box plated
all around and adorned at the bottom
with two wide tucks, which are repeated
just above the knees. The shirt waist is
tucked and trimmed with narrow en-
broidery. A white roll brimmed sailor,
with blue leather binding and white
straw bow, completes this costume.
And while on the subject of dress for
your outing, remember that unre stricted
lungs are of paramount Importance, and
fortunately in the matter OF proper cor
set to accomplish this result, health and
fashion are not at a variance, SO by
choosing a correctly built and fashionable
corset, such as the C-R a la Spirite, which
holds the abdomen in and the hips back.
you will find yourself taking tull long
breaths OF health-giving air, and come
back from your recreation trip with re-
newed capacity for work or play.
ELAINE RozE.
New York July rs, 1904
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1904-07-27

Joseph w. Folk, the fearless exposer of
the St. Louis boodlers, gets the demo-
cratic nomination for governor of Miss
ouri, but the politicians have tied his
hands by nominating an auditor and
thus preventing the next governor from
accomplishing any reforms in the state.
It's rather poor outlook for reform in
a state which has betn full of corrupt
practices, especially among those who
were supposed to be above graft and
public plundtring.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1904-07-27
A Geographical Love Song.

In the State of Mass. there lives a lass
l love to go N. c.; no other Miss. can e'er,
| Wis, be half so dear to Me. r. I. is
blue and her cheeks the hue of shells
where waters swash; on her pinkwhite
phlz there New. Ariz. the least complexion
Wash. La.i could l win the heart of
Mimi, Id ask for nothing more, but
only dream upon the theme, and Conn. it
DER and Ore. Why is it, pray. can't
O., Wy. Kan. NV. Yer. propose to her
my will ? shun the task 'twould be to
ask this gentle maid to wed. And so, to
press my suit, guess Alaska Pa. instead.
Brooklyn Eagle.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1904-07-27
Burns Relics for the St. Louis "World'!
Fair

The following is list of relics, ETC.,
collected by James Hyslop, Kirk Port,
Ayr, acting under the instructions of w.
Robertson, J. P, Ayr. and sent from
Liverpool recently, for the St. Louis
Exhibition: 1. Bust of Burns, which
Travelled before in Amer ca with the stat
ues of Tam O. Shanter and Souter John
ME; 2, original sign of the Tam O. Shan
ter Inn, AIRY; 8. oil painting of the poet
which was hung in Glasgow Exhibition;
4, Souter Johnnie's cobbling stool and
avis; 5, silver watch and chain which
belonged to Richmond, clerk to Gavin
Hamilton; 6, silver quaich or stirrup
cup which belonged to Nance Tannock;
Z, six pewter measures, including the
-four gill chap" minus the lid, whether
in gathering between "Lapraik' and the
poet is not known, from Poosie Nancy's;
s, pewter basin from the same place; 9,
sugar basin and ornament which belonged
to Jean Armour; 10, The Ettrick Shep-
herds snuff horn; IL. collection plates
and baptismal basin of the Auld LIGHT
Kirk, AIRY; IL, number of old engrav-
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1904-07-27
"Business Opportunities"

Study the Business Opportunities" in
the newspapers. What proportion of
them are above the suspicion of being
mere bats for catching gudgeons? AS
for ;he Wall Street advertisements, the
''mark,t letter people," the pool" rig
gers, the Inevitable clerk in the office OF
large corporation who will confdeu-
tialiv sell Information of certain move
ment in lis stock" the turfgu.de COM
panies with their daily tips, they require
no comment. So tar as drugs and medi
cites are concerned. we are SO accustomed
to quack nostrums that weconsider them
with The utmost liberation, and accept
good-natu; eddy the maxim of one of the
most success al of modern nerve in
V gorators." that 'the value of an adver-
tised medicine depends on what you put
on the bottle rather than on what you
put in it."-[George w. Alger in the
August Atlantic.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1904-07-27

on Monday IS 900 employees in the Fall
River cotton mills struck rather than &C.
cept a 1912 per cent reduction in wages.
According to Bradstreets there have
been twice as many strikes this year
than in the same period of 1908 and we
are only half through the year. The
golden rule is just as necessary for daily
life as when it was first uttered by Con-
fucius 600 years before the Christian era
labor would prevent many Of the difficult
ties and Misunderstanding that now
arise
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1904-07-27
Probate of Will.

MOSES c. HENDERSON'S ESTATE.
STATE OF VERMONT, Caledonia District, So.
In Probate Court, held at the Probate Office
In 81. Johnsbury, within and for said District,
on the 10th day of July. A. d. 1904.
An instrument purporting to be the last
will and testament of Moses c. Henderson,
late of st. Johnsbury, in said district, de-
ceased. being presented to court by Ola Henry
Henderson, the executor therein named, for
probate: 1t Is ordered by said Court that
all persons concerned therein be notified to
appear at q session of said court. to be held
at the Probate Office in St. Johnsbury on the
cause, if any they may have, against the
probate of said will; for which purpose it
is further ordered that copy of the record
cessiveIy in the Caledonian, printed at St.
Johnsbury, previous to said time appointed
for hearing.
BY the Court, Attest:
WALTER P. SMITH, Judge.
A true copy of Record. Attest:
WALTER p. SMITH, Judge
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1904-07-27
Signed

Anyone who has dyspepsia, indiges-
ton, headaches, dizziness, or specks
before the eyes, or any form of liver and
stomach troubles. should take advan-
tage Of this chance to be cured without
risking penny. The guarantee is plain
and absolute. If Mi-o-na does not do all
that is claimed for it, if it does not give
perfect satisfaction, if it does not cure
dyspepsia in any form and give perfect
and natural digestion, your money is
returned upon demand.
W. B. Eastman gives positive guar
antee with every box. showing, most
conclusivelv his faith in this remarkable
remedy.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1904-07-27
Commissioners Notice.
DAVID R. PERKINS ESTATE.

The subscribers, having been appointed by
the Honorable Probate Court for the district
of Caledonia, commissioners to receive, ex.
anime, and adjust all claims and demands OF
ali persons against the estate of David R.
Perkins, late CT Danvil1e. in said district,
deceased. and the term of six months from
said court to the creditors of said de-
ceased, to exhibit and prove their respective
claims before us: Give NOTICE that we will at.
tend to the duties of our appointment at the
John P. Weeks store, of No. DanviIle in Dam
vile in said District, the 9Th day of Aug
nst and the 18th day OF November next. at
ten O'Clock, in the forenoon. each of said
days.
ORA N. DREW,
JOHN P. WEEKS.
mmissioners.
No. Danville, Vt, July IS. 1904.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1904-07-27
An Advertising Thought.

The newspaper reading public now
adays looks for something more than
mere ''news" in its journals. The pur-
chase and sale of commodities are among
the most important events of every day
life. Therefore the wise merchant tells
the public what he wants to sell, and
there is no better way to convey this in
formation than by advertising. To be
sure. his news" does not come by cable,
telegraph or over the editors desk, but
it is very important news all the same
Printers Ink.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1904-07-27
CURRENT PRESS COMMENT.
Corporations with Souls.

1t would be difficult to find another
business firm in New England which has
done more for its employees than the
Vermont Marble company. Possibly
the Fairbanks company of St. Johnsbury
have done as much, but that is doubtful,
especially if the record of the past ten
years is taken into consideration. What
the future may hold in store for the
marble industry of Vermont does not
appear, at this writing, but the sincere
wish is expressed that the Proctors and
the men may be able to so amicably
adjust their differences as to prevent a
long continued strike. That this will
soon be done we have an abiding faith.
-[Barre Telegram.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1904-07-27

ings, including proof engraving of the
poet, old engravings of The Cotter's
Saturday Night" and .Jolly Beggars,"
photographs of the poets son, etc. We
understand that Mr.. Hyslop is getting
up further consignment. to be de-
spatched as soon as possible.-[ Kilmarn.
ock Standard.