The Washington times., 1904-01-17
MALAPROPLSMS
Women Who Made Them

n INCE the days OF Sheridan and his
immortal play. n.The Rivals
- Mrs. Malaprop has been a syn
onym for the ignorant misuse
OF words. Yet how many people there
are today In real life who, attempting
the use OF words which are to them
unfamiliar. err as grievously as she
was wont to do. A proper understand
ing OF words constitutes one difference
between the ignorant man and the edu-
Gated man and gives the latter an i'm
nense advantage. The proper under
standing Of words makes for happiness
intellectually and morally: II removes
tendency to Took for trouble" and
enables man to rise superior to the
petty MISUNDERSTANDING TO which the
ignorant are liable
This is admirably illustrated by
well-known incident in the life OF
Daniel O'Connell, the famous Irish DO
Iitical agitator. The story is familiar.
but is well worth repeating in this par
ticular connection.
There was in Dublin an old annie
woman renowned throughout the city
Tor her violent temper and for the vi
Imperative genius with which she en-
forced her remarks when angry. A per
feet food Of BiIIingsgate would pour
from her mouth on such occasions and
1t took very little 20 call f. forth
o Conneil's friends made wager with
him that in a war of words with the
old woman he would be completely ont
done. i'm spite OF his well known mowers
Of oratory- He took up the wager. and
on certain day repaired with his
friends who had stalSed their money
against him TO the vicinity OF the old
woman and her apple cart This. in an
apparently accidental wav. he managed
to upset. and was assaiIed in a perfect
torrent OF abuse He retorted in kind
and the battle was on. The old woman.S
volubiiity at first proved too much for
OConnell. and much to his friends de-
nght he seemed to be getting the worst
OF ii. when the tide turned in his favor
by his calling her an 'isosceIes triangle -
That tioored her. but she was game TO
the last and still fought on But when
ne called her ''paralleIopipedon" her
emotions overcame her and she became
speeches.. And so he won. Her faynor-
ance OF the mearing OF ordinary harm
less words proved her undoing. for she
read into these polysyllabIes the most
outrageous meanings. They were emil
thets for which she could had no
equivalents
The misuse of words is. of course.
often source of much humor. and
iunny stories without number are told
or modern Malaprops which outdo any
tning that that famous woman ever ut
tered There is well known wealthy
, woman in Chicago to whom are at
tributed many humorous instances of
this falling. The trouble with such
people is that they do not realize the
danger and the folly OF getting beyond
their depth. and in their grandiloquence
they seek for words of which they have
very vague comprehension The folly
or IL all in one sense is pathetic but IL
is always humorous
The woman just referred to. once in
talking Of her young days, said: Yes.
l was very fond of dancing in my girl
hood In fact. il was at a fancy dress
ball that I first met my husband. I
remember 1T so well. He was so quaint
~ dressed He was in the garbage of a
monk" Had she stuck to the word
dress with which she was on easy
terms. she would not have made her
self ridiculous but in cropping after the
unusual she got beyond her depth.
The following is also accredited to the
same woman: My daughter, YOU
know" she said. has been travelling
in the East and cruising about the Lee
want" How delightfulI' exclaimed a
friend And did she go to the Oarda-
nelles?" Yes. indeed" was this reply.
Il think they asked her to dine with
them
On another occasion, when some one
took occasion to remark that it was
too bad her daughter vas so delicate.
she replied: Not at ali; my daughter
is very indicate, very"
Another woman, a nouveau richie, had