The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1904-04-17

him. Never did I see such a trans
formation i'm a mans face: then, with
one short. powerful expletive, he start
ed down the street on a dead run.
THAT night the theatre was filed 10
overfiowing-men with elongated locks
and clerical bearing, a perfect SYM
postum OF parsons, preachers and the
oloSues. Every last one of them held
a book open before him. For an over
tuTe the orchestra played Nearer, Ny
God, TO Thee and the audience raised
its voices in chorus.
well, we didn't get far in the first
act before pandenonium broke loose.
One old preacher jumped over the foot
lights and called me every name in
both testaments and several that were
in neither
And what do you think it was all
about?
THE town was the seat of a theo-
logical institution, and every mothers
son of them, and daughter. too, seeing
the name of the play. The Lost Para
disc had come to hear a reading from
Millions Paradise Lost
THAT was the way the manager had
billed it,
We left on a freight that night, and
nANAAA L play a. lEAnA u AetAt
Here are the very pick Of the Jokes in
.'Piff. Paff. POuff'':
Eddie Foy-Put not an enemy into
thy mouth to breed rats in thy garnet.
Miss Fischer-When a widow mar
ries, 1t is the triumph Of hope over ex-
Perience.
Mr.. Hyams-The latest play? NC
AdOO About Nothing"
Eddie FOy-A friend in need is a bore
indeed.
Mr.. Hyams-DO you play bridge?
Mr.. MirOn-I live in Brooklyn.
Miss CamerOn-YOu have a curl and
your eyes are blue.
Eddie FOy-Yes, they call me Kyrle
Bellew.
Sarah Bernhard possesses wit as
well as common sense. A well known
French palmist was considering going
To England to practice her art, and was
in doubt as TO whether she would be
as successful on the other side of the
channel as she had been at home.
Among other people she consulted
Mime. Bernhard on the subject.
Would L succeed if 1 went to Lon
DOM" the palmist asked.
You had better look at your hand
and find out" was the reply.
Miss Jessie Milward was among the
actresses recently Intercepted upon
the advisability of young women
adopting the profession of acting as a
means to a livelihood. There were sew
eral Of them, and. as is usually and,
one might say. periodically the case,
each summed up her personal expert
ences and granted advice accordingly.
Miss Milward's opinion contained as
much of good judgment as any. She
said:
THE ordinary young woman has an
altogether perverted idea of the stage.
1 receive dozens Of letters from young
girls asking my advice. Most of these
girls are in good circumstances and are
not forced by necessity to earn a live
hhOod. There is glitter and glamour
TO the stage which quite bewilders
them. They see the successful actress
and they hear the applause, and their
mOdicum Of intelligence goes no fur
Their. They do not realize the years of
work which went to make that sue
cess. Here is an example which,
while 1t may strike you as somewhat
Overdrawn, is absolutely true. 1t
shows what 1 call the kitchen idea OF
the stage.
The other day a maid came here
with a message from a friend who lives
up town. She WAS a new maid, and
perhaps rather raw. While l was
writing she went TO the mantel and
looked over the photographs. Sudden
Is she bluCted out: Are you an act
ress?' i sometimes have been called
So [ answered. Well. do you know.
she said. I've always wanted to go on
the stage, and now that I've seen you
I think that l willard there you are
That girls ideas, ludicTous as they
seem, are no more absurd than those of
dozens Of others who should have more
intelligence
Francis Wilson is a sailor. Possibly
not a sailor bOld-but still a sailor. At
his home on Long Island sound he has
a small sailboat. and during his vaca-
ton he frequently explores the depths
fifty and a hundred yards from the
shore.
This boat has been named Psyche.
which seems to mt the light and airy
nature Of the craft and OF il he is
rather proud among the host Of com
mon place names Of many other local
boats.
One day last summer Mr.. Wilson was
on the pier when he saw grizzly
FISHERMAN regarding with n disguised
expression the name as il appears on
the stern. Pointing with his thumb
he called his companions attention to
il and said:
.P-s-y-c-h-eH Well, If that amt the
durndest way L ever seen to spell
fish"
It was an amusing little story when
il was first told upon Miss Ethel Bar
rymore, and now that it is being re-
told it is none the less readable. The
actress is about to write a book Some
one-we forget at this moment whether
- was CadmuS or just one Of the Of
ficials of the Jockey club-Once made a
long winded complaint to the effect