The Washington times., 1904-08-07

CAC VI IhC Il4AAsoo III WHICH bHCOliCe
fail. On general principles, of course
it is best for self-respecting beings tc
avoid disagreements, since these
things can rarely be patched up with
out leaving some scar. In the process
Of adjusting the ideas of two healthy
individuals of marked characteristics
however, disagreements do generally
occur, and every couple has to work
out its own in It's own way.
Points In Paragraphs.
Funston has gone to Alaska. A warm
wave is looked for there.
New York is not saying much about the
delay in Dewey's prize money. The
Dewey Arch still hangs fire.
A citizen Of Philadelphia has been
sued for pew rent. That is one way of
making churchgoing attractive.
A negro escaped a policeman by
swimming in the canal. He probably
WIS lLlDIOubul1 u4SB u4Stu dAAtI HIS DelNL
in the blue Potomac.
Mr.. Root continues to dodge office
without any apparent Inconvenience to
himself. but the office is beginning to
feel hollow and empty.
One reason why we all eat so much
meat is that the butcher, on being ask
ed for a small steak. puts on such a
naughty and disdainful air.
-------
When one hears that Russell Sage is
lightweight years old, the first thing
that comes to mind is. what lot OF
time he has missed wasting
Those who object to the big stick idea
would do well to remember that on oc-
casion, the ace of clubs is needed to take
q trick. just as much as any other ace.
If Russia ever undertook to search
ship commanded by Robley d. Evans
it would find that there are things
more explosive than japanese torpc-
does/
Senator Carmack Of Tennessee thrills
Washington with the news that he sees
victory ahead The main question Is:
Can the judge sprint fast enough TO
catch I'D to it?
Correspondents Of the New Yors
Herald" are now struggling with the
question whether thoughts occupy space
1t is not thought that gives a man Ike
swelled head
The sneak thief who ran away with
the speech Of Representative Swanson
Of Virginia describes himself as a pro
fessional bag-snatcher. Another time
he viii be beware Of bags of wind
Senator EIkins says that West Vir-
ginia is welded 10 protection. He
should look thoughtfully at Henry G..
Davis and reflect that fathers-in-law
have been known TO break up families.
A temperance woman looked mourn
fully at the saloon dedicated by Bishop
Potter. and sighed, IF Sister Nation
had only been here.' If Sister Nation
had. the bishop might have had his nose
broken.
Wall Street may not believe in Roose-
welt enough 70 pour out money for him.
but # is betting on him at 10 to 6, lust
the same. What's the use Of spending
money on thing that Is going TO hap
pen. anyway?
Baseball Is said to interfere seriously
with the negroes engaged in cotton-rais-
ing IN Mississippi. Clearly, it will be
necessary to abolish the baseball, the
cotton, or the negroes. All that will
be left then VIII be the boil weevil.
Mr.. Reeves. Of Little Rock. comes to
Washington with a tale of a mare that
would bolt over the fence If anybody
said: Look out, the Yankees are com
ing" That IS pretty good. She was
probably ra.1ed in the same country as
Seton-ThomL sons mother fox, who kill
ed her captured cub by feeding II pois-
oned meat
Ernest Crosby prophecies that the
universal adoption Of a vegetarian diet
will abolish vice. Come to think of IT,
it would be rather surprising 20 see a
man running faro bank or a burglary
business on string beans and cracked
wheat but there are men who would be
perfectly willing 10 live on vegetable
food in the form Of old rye for the rest
OF their lives. II they could.
WHEN MANDY STARTS TO WASH
When Mandy sets the b'iler on,