The Savannah morning news., 1904-01-31
THE GENIAL IDIOT
Some Suggestions for Social Exhibit.
BY JOHN KENDRICK BANGS.
Copyright, 1904, by John Russell Davidson.

doir beauties seldom enjoy, is a .f.r
sweeter thing as a steady diet than the
Altar of the Queen of the Flowers
which frequently grows stale and Of
fensive. The violet is a lovely, mod
est flower, but there are times when
bunch of violets suggests the Board
of HEALTH"
81 have frequently thought that"
put in Mrs. Pedagog. "Of course I
know that I, as a Boarding House
keeper, could not hope to enter the
inner circle, and l haven't liked the
notion that I am not as good as some
body else, who is really no better than
L, but I have always been comforted
by the thought that my troubles were
really small when compared to theirs
L don't have so much of anything that
1 have ceased to enjoy everything"
"Hurrahi" shouted the Idiot "There
speaks your true woman. Mrs. Peda-
cog, in spite of the trials of her life
to which / have contributed much, is
still not blase. She is as thirsty for
the pleasures as she was at IS. She
is as hungry for sentiment as she was
at 20. At 30 she regards the world as
a pretty good place after all, and is
glad she is alive"
'At when?" demanded Mrs. Peda
cog.
IhlrIy, replied the Idiot.
Young man." said the old lady, as
severely as she could, 81 am 60-and
you know it,
What of that, Mrs. Pedagog," said
the Idiot. suavely. II called YOU
30 knowing you to be so, because YOU
have often told me your age. But
I what is go years of age but thirty dou-
BILE distilled?"
What the dickens has all this got
f1,a y -
LOUISE" asked the Bibliomaniac, i'm
patiently. I'VE all of us know Mrs
But"
All this has to do with the Social
EXHIBIT at st. Louis to the extent that
we have right here at this board, and
II is fa1r to assume that there are
thousands OF others who look at the
thlng In the same way, one who is
willing to look upon that part of the
social Exhibit which involves the four
| hundred, in proper spirit" said the
1ulot. On this social Midway that I
propose you will find, if the scheme
is ever adopted, all the misery, and
want all the Summing that you can
9esIre; You Will find your Trips to
SWeatland,' your Hungarian Floods
your voyage to the Tenements.' your
exposition to Wall Street. but
nowhere will you find such
Illuminating, amusing and instruc-
tive misery as will be provided
by the show called "A Trip to the -Four
hundred. That is why I mentioned it
nrst' Mr.. Brief knows, and I know
that the members of that disorganized
we might say anarchic body-are not
society, but the vast public considers
them so to be and we might as we'll
let the vast public have its way-gv-
ing them meanwhile even at a finan-
| clal loss, all the other phases of the
Coincide Humane to which they are
| entitled. Let 'em have the sweat shop.
the East Side the mob, the rump par
hament OF the village grocery and the
man of the coffee wagon-give them
all these things but do not fail to give
them nor to insist upon the Four Hun
| dred. Rub the Four Hundred into
them. No Social Exhibit can be com
plete without it. and do it with an
appalling verisimilitude. 1t is only by
so doing that you can make this de-
tached but dominating influence OF
| our social life useful. Let us see Tom
my Dare in action leading his cotil-
lions and dining la Zoo; give us a
| day with the Society Girl who has to
go into a training to meet the exact
ions of her daily life in the season al
most as strenuous as that of a pug
! Hist on the eve of a great fight; por-
| tray the CluD WINDOW nlleQ WIN gllQ-
| ed youth engaged in a nerveless eff
! fort to turn their patrimony into high
balls, poker, bridge whist or something
else of a hectic nature and whose only
real occupation in life is ordering
tasteless repasts and ogling women on
the streets. Let us have Society laid
bare as it is down there at st. Louis
and I'll wager the whole country will
flock to see it If you get the real peo-
pie. Don't have Tommy Dare's I'M
derstudy, have Tommy Dare himself
Don't ask some clever actress to inn
! personate Mrs. Van Doodle of New
port; get that interesting lady herself
and your exposition will be a corking
big success
And do you think these people
would go?" demanded Mr. Brief
"Why not?" said the Idiot. "As far
as 1 can observe they are constantly
making holy show of themselves for
no reason at all. With a humanitar-
ian object in view why should they
| declina2"