Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1904-04-29
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Exchange.
Many a rich father has discovered
that 1t is easier to get a daughter on
Ills hands than to keep sonin-law on
his feet.-Philadelphia Record.
Bob-Gosh. Rob, whered you rake
up those seedy old shoes? Rob-Why.
man, those are my patent feathers. Bob
But the patent aas expired, eh2
Miss Carrye Moore-She calls him
her Intended. Are they engaged? Miss
Cutting Hintz-No. but she intends to
marry him.-St Paul Pioneer Press.
Nipped in the Bud: Actress have
been robbed of my jewels Hotel Clerk
1t won't do any good; there isn't
newspaper in the wn"-Town Top
les.
Il can always tell when you are go-
ing to tell lie." said Gregg to Legg.
"HowT asked Legg- Il see you open
open your mouth" said Gregg Town
Topics.
Mabel-Why didn't you scream when
he put his arm around you? Ethel.
l wanted to. but couldn't, and when
could | didn't want to.-Butte Inter
Mountain.
Undoubtedly ~ see that somebody
says there is no such thing as luck In
business" He must be one of the
lucky ones who have succeeded."-
Exchange
EfHn
thing! Bertie-Don't. eh? Well. that
old one OF yours that | cut open was
stuffed chock full OF breakfast food
Noman's Home Companion.
And do you think" he asked, that
men progress after death?" We'll"
she replied. 'if they don't 1t would al
most seem useless for some of them to
die'-Chicago Record Herald.
What She Did: And what did you
do when your doctor told you you
would have to quit wearing corset
and give up sweets?' II sent for an
other doctor. Chicago Record Herald.
Mahoole-Nixt tonne OF pass wild
loidy, Mulligan, we've got to remove yer
hat! Mulligan-And suppose Oh re-
fuse? Mahoole-Then, bedad, ye've
got to remove yer coat-Chicago News.
Ernie-No, she isn't going to marry
Claude after all. lda-But they say
he can quote Emerson and Browning.
"Yes; but the other young man can
quote Sugar and Steel."-Chicago
Daily News.
How He Lost Her: She-I suppose
II pretty girl should come along you
wouldn't care anything about me any
more. He-Nonsense, Kate What do
l care for good looks? You suit me all
right.-Exchange.
Quick Action First Russian-You
say the fight was quickly over? Sec
ond Russian-Yes; it was finished be-
fore you could say Jackopolinsky
Robinsonopolotoksky = New Orleans
Times-Democrat
Really" said Mrs. Oldcastle, your
little dinner last night was quite
recherche" "Oh, dear" her hostess
groaned. II just knew that new cook
would make botch of il some way
Cnlcag0 RECORD Herald.
She-Have you ever met my two
dearest friends? They are just lovely
and SO devoted. He-How long have
you known them? She-Why. I've
known Annette nearly ten days and
Margaret almost week.-Cleyeland
Plain Dealer.
You should strive to appeal to the
Imagination and the human interest of
your pupils" said the principal. ~
do" answered the teacher. but it Is
very hard to convince the boys that
Hector and Achilles were as great men
as Corbett and Jeffries"
Mamma, what would you do If that
big vase in the parlor should get brok
emp said Tommy. Il should spank
whoever did it" said Mrs Banks. gaz-
ing serenely at her little son. We'll.
then, you'd better begin to get up your
muscle" said Tommy, gleefully, "'cos
papa's broken it"
\ weekly newspaper recently pub
lished the following in its Answers
to Correspondents" column"
nave lWO dpplc llteS III Jul SdIdci,
writes Ella, and in the spring they are
covered with such lovely pink and
white blossoms that | pull them off for
table decorations. Now | see that there
are no apples on the trees. Do you
think that this is likely to be because
| pulled the blossoms off p"
In a Tangle: BY Jove, old chapr'
said Mr. Makinbrakes, with enthusi
asm, your wife must have been
mighty handsome woman when she
was young. Even In all these years
she hasn't changed so much-though.
of course. 1t couldn't have been many
years since she was young and hand
some-but when you come to- think
how little it takes to make some people
look old YOU know you wonder how