New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1904-12-21
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

A member of the American Flag Society writes
to remind the readers of The Tribune that one
hundred years ago the 2oth of December the first
American flag raised in New Orleans.
No Particular Grief.-Fuddy-Jilso is married
man, l suppose? Duddy-Oh. no; IT is natural for
melancholy Experimentation Transcript.
The English language is supposed to be very
simple in the matter of genders. But foreigners
who triumphantly handle questions of gender Of
nanimate things in their own languages often
have their difficulties with the English. a French
man recently came 10 grief over his English.
Il fear l cockroach too much updE your time.
madam he remarked politely to his hostess.
''En-croach. monsieur she smilingly corrected
him. He threw up his hands in despair "Ah,
your English genders." he sighed.
wHATCHY COIN T. GIMME?
"Whatchy goin' t gimme? says the youngest boy
"Whatchy soin' t gimme:" says the youngest girl
'whetcny goin t. simme?' says the maiden to
Everywhere the answer is. 20 sumpln dunno
''Whatchy goin' t gimme?" asks the little boy at
His just fore-christmas goodness makes him mind,
''whatchy goin' t gimme" sings the gamin in the
'whatchy goin' t gimme?' every hand We
"whatchy goin / gimme" asks town of Uncle
Bigger better waterways. or leave me as am?'
'Whatchy goin' t gimme asks the world of
Greater town or just the kind you used to be be-
"Uhatchy goin simme?' asks the yawnng mon
Mea4t . catch the coin to feed the hungry folk
in fiocks;
"whatchy goin' t gimme?" asks the wretched and
Living in their penury a stones throw from your
door
'Whatchy soin' t gimme?" asks the great big
world, OF you,
Lifetime fun of usefulness heart sincere and
''Whatchy gon' t simme?" Hear it everywhere
Always comes the answer 30, just sumpin. I
dunno baltimore American.
In China spurious coin may he lawfully manu-
featured when it is Intended to be placed in the
collins of the dead The Chinese believe that those
bad coins make the dead Just as happy as good
coins would
In South n, An sqifinS f
Chronicle.
A story of British iteralne is being told. A
wealthy American ordered a set of decanters in a
London shop. AS the purchase represented more
money than he had his person the time. he
gave his address the hotel and instructed the
assistant to mark them c. o. D. The assistant
made note OF the request. but the purchaser was
surprised TO find the goods left at the hotel with
out demand for payment When the parcel was
unpaclIed however. it developed that each decanter
had been beautifully engraved in twning letters
&C. o. D.
Establishing His Claim-'Yes. he's looked upon
the inventor of self-lignting cigarette (Cleve-
land Plain Dealer.
Emperor William wrote a poem once. which he
submitted to a great literary man who dined NJ
the castle for that purpose particularly The critic
read it. and found his dual duties in conflict He
had to advise amateur poet with an excep-
tional power for resentng a hostile comment He
yielded only very little to the exigencles of the
situation This verse. your majesty he began
seems to require alteration in certain respects
The amateur took the manuscript and COINED il
thoughtfuly. Then his brow cleared why =" he
cried. as seeing a sudden light Il have ac-
tualy not signed the poem. Give me a peni,'
And the only fault he saw in the work was forth
with remedied.
The Bishop of Kensington, at a prize dlstribu-
ton recently told OF case in which a boy got The
better OF the examiner. Suppose" asked the 80
thirds Of an orange which piece would YOU "a H.. -.
Please. sir, the half!' shouted the LAD "Stupid
mark against You for that" subsequen}Tvt black black
tation Of scholars waited on the examiner to con
vince him that he was wrong Why am I wrong?''
he inquired. Because Tommy does not like or
anges at ALL" the conclusive Gnswer-lSt
James's Gazette
Cross country runs have never had the popuIort+,
and among the collegians in the United
Sta ties which have been notable among the undar
graduates in England, In the Old Country students
in winter rarely have deep drifts or severe cold 10
encounter. Cambridge this year defeated Oxford n,
decisive style. but If the contest had taken place
in such a storm as that of Saturday in New-Yorl
the result might have been different
Judge Richard W clifford of Chicago. is proven
hial for his original humorous stories and one of
rushing into the Circuit Court one morning befnre
court was called and said; ~,
Il want TO git warrant for a man TO KIN tog
We'll. my man. you don't CONF 10 ihls court TO
get warrants In cases of that kindi IT YOU want
the dog killed YOU should go to ponce court said
the Judge ,a a.,
qured In an interested manner,
Did the dog bite YOU?
Yeas, he bit me-
Well the dog mad ,,a. -
Vas de tog madt? No, vas N"u" -'buiialo
Commercial.