The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1904-04-05

American vessel to Port Arthur and the
harbor entrance would be blocked in about
fifteen minutes.
"After reading six books of the Had
I felt that I would rather give a large
sum than read to the end" says Herbert
Spencer in his autobiography. Many COL
lege students have felt the same way,
and finding that the book has been read
before and done into English, have given
from so cents to rs cents each for what
is sometimes called "hoss,'' because it
pulls you out Of mudholes and over rough
places; in other words, literal transla~
ton. The Iliad was doubtless pretty good
reading for the ancient Greeks, but we
prefer something that smacks little more
Of the United States.
Doc Bixby of the Nebraska State Jour-
nal is puzzing over the problem, Shall
We Know Each Other There" Too many
Of us, after we get s125 ahead in the bank
and own a few shares of 1.-THE Yellow
Bonanza" mining stock, don't know each
other here.
A former school teacher in Ohio claims
to have the essay on "Cats" written in
his youth by man now holding re-
sponsible position under the United States
government. 1t sounds to us like fake,
but we give it for what it is worth:
"Cats Is an insect, with long tail IL
some boy hasn't cut 1t off some cats has
| one eye because Jim Jones shot the other
eye out with his cir gun some cats is
black and white and the color of our brin-
die cow and squalls at night on top of the
| Woodshed and can see in the dark with
the eye what is not shot out Cats has four
| legs two at the front end and two at the
end that isn't front The legs at the end
| where the head is is straight and the legs
at the end where the tail is is crooked
| like the hind leg Of a white cow with her
horns sawed off and is good to give milk
and make butternik for pigs that is good
for sausage and drink slop and eat little
chickens and make ma mad at the cats
| or pigs I forget which Our cat Is good
| to jump on our dog when he is asleep and
| lick him before he wakes up and wonders
| If he is having tooth pulled This is all
| there Is about cats"
/ Walt Mason has just dug up a terrible
example in the shape Of prosperous and
amiable Nebraska merchant who knows
| his own weakness and who confesses to
| it with contrition. This merchant says:
! IT believe that my greatest weakness 10
an abnormal desire to talk; 1t is a weak
ness that despise. and try to recover
! FROM but can't do it. If ] get into an
| argument with another man forget that
| he has moral right to present his side
/ Of the case. I use up all the language at
tries to get in word After 1 have
talked while I usually pull up with a
4 jerk, remembering that am giving way
to the old chronic weakness. and then I
am ashamed Of myself, and listen cour-
\ teously to what the other fellow has to
say; but by the time this happens he is
usually mad and so the argument turns
out to be improbable from all points Of
/ view
/ From this it seems that this lamentable
/ weakness is masculine as well as-that
8 is, men have falling this way as well
= as-as-other people. Now, If there is any
body whom 1t is unpleasant to have
J around. it is the person who dominates
the conversation, walking roughshod over
it when you want to talk yourself. We
once knew party who thought before he
spoke, and he said it never did him any
4 harm SO far as he could see. "A. J. r.
The japanese bury their dead with the hssa
toward the north.