Crittenden press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1879-1907, 1904-09-08
The ARIZONA KICKER

In almost every issun A hundred times
over our friends have nske why we paid
any attention To his cbulitions, bit we
have gone our way and let MIN have full
swing aud been rather serious to see how
far he would carry things
Two weeks ago. determined TO make
us take notice OF him. lac devoted one
full page To US, and We must admit 1t
was rather racy reading The picture
Do published over our namos was that OF
al Ohio murderer, and in tho 80 called
history he gave " VI we counted up 2i0
lies. lsi ISLANDERS aud 2lS libcs.
IL We had had business at Lone Jack
last week. we should have visited the
Recorder office aud tAkon Brother Wat
KIDS 10y the nose and led him slowly up
and down the street Of his town, but we
had matters 10 see 10 at home and paid
no attcu.ion to his attack. This probab-
ly encouraged him 10 believe that We
were afraid 10 move In the case, and that
his chance had come to make a strike.
notwithstanding that we were the In
suited party, he sent W challenge TO
light duel. aud We uudorstAnd that he
made "A bet % sl0 that We would refuse
Ia accept the honor. He bad our an
swef within 10 minutes after his chal-
lrnge had been received The day was
tet Tor "Wednesday last, and the place
was At Johnson's ford. We wore on the
SPOT with our second 10 minutes before
the hour named, aud after We had been
kept waiting ful hour a messenger
brought word from Brother Watkins
that ~ he had boil on his leg. the AZ
lair must be postponed for two weeks.
Our action Ia the case might not have
hron strictly ap Ia code. but IL was
the best Ne could do under the circum
stances. As the trut move we took of
our coat aud gave the messenger n
humping hc will remember 20 the cud
Of the year aud beyond. We did not
Whollop him because he bore the mes
ssge. but because he grinned in mali
c,ou- way a. he delivered IL. Having
finished With him, We mounted our cay
", and gAllopcd into Lone Jack.
We hoped to find and surprise Brother
Watkin- and HE boil, and We were no
disappointed lie at in his sAnctun
With look ~ completeness on his fac
~ bee thought ~ Us waiting at Johnson
t,rd for HIM We entered hi- presence
unauuounc,-l. and NJ We stood befot
han that lDuk ~ complAcency fade
away into one of terror He turned a
white as flour, aud his Jaw dropped an,
hi eye- rolled The man he had so OF
ton characterized A. villain, liar, chea
ssindlcr. robbor, bunco steerer and
nundrcd other things, stood before hin
lie couldn't make Il out hut sat an
stared and stared. and the Adams Al
pie in his throat moved up and down a
u trying 10 Ind away out.
We remarked that wo had tho homo
Of addressing lin Watkins, co worke
In the field OF literature, but he onl
gurgled in reply.
We observed that Wa hoped 10 hay
the honor oi meeting him at johnson
ford two hours earlier, and had been col
siderably disappointed at his non al
pearAnce. and he closed his eyes an
groAned.
We made inquiry As to how he WI
getting along 10 a financial way, an
whether the circulation Of the Records
had yet included the South Sea- island
but he didn't encourage Us to pursl
that particular vein Of humor.
IL being a hot day, we expressed su
plcion that Brother Watkins had bee
working his brain too much and was &
the point % n collapse, and somethir
like faint smile chased itself across h
fccc.
The foreman OF the Office, who appea
ed TO be very Intelligent and fair min
ed man, entered the sanctum after
whilo and Expressed the hope that V
would mt do no shooting before he hI
recelyed the Ella back salary due bin
We ascertAined from him that Broth
Watkins was a good husband and foI
father, and that his favorite drink W
lemonade with blackberry tioati
around in IT, lie further Informed
that Brother Watkins had set out to /
come now humorist in the Weste
field, and all that he had said about
In the last two years WAS in the way o
Joke. Brother Watkins neither cor
borAted nor denied this, hut looked @
OF tho window in a longing way.
longed to be in Mexico.
After an hour Of rather solid emf
ment we took Brother Watkins by
nose and lifted him up, and then
took him by the ear and led him
doors.
Ills wife and two children had appe
ed upon the scene, but they took
word for it that we didn't intend to
p-iye them of husband or father.