The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1904-10-11

SfO< trail Of Polly's rufles.
"Of course do,v ex
claimed Polly emphatically.
And you won't listen to reason
argued.
Not when there can't be any reason
Mr.. Heavyfeather,' said Polly severely
turning to gather her ruffies up daintily
into a bunch.
If had lied" began, plotting
her carefully through the mud on the
tips Of her patent leather shoes.
Il would have despised you, Mr.
Heayyfeather.' .
And now that haven't lied"
II don't believe you
struck at a passing dog viciously
with my cane.
That's just the way with a woman
/ declared. "There is no use trying to
reason with her. She always makes
up her mind in advance, anyhow
"She has eyes-and common sense,
Mr.. Heavyfeather."
And you can't get word in edge
wise
Not If you don't know what you
want to say"
And she interrupts just as you are
getting started"
"oh, were you getting started ~
Polly lifted her eyebrows in gentle
surprise.
"And twists every word you say
grumbled.
You are very much mistaken" de-
clared Polly, quickening her step, SO
that ! felt as though / ought to run
and headsller off; "a woman is always
willing to listen to reason, even when
it isn't reasonable, or to an excuse that
isn't even excusable. What she Is
dying to hear is something the least
bit convincing and rational that will
clear the man whom she loves of hav-
ing done anything whong,"
Il haven't done anything wrongv' /
grumbled defiantly.
"But," went on Polly, ignoring my
expostulation, there never was man
living who knew how to argue with a
womanr'
The average man hates an argu-
ment,' / asserted.
"And inyariable,v agreed Polly,
"either tries to slip out of it or to bully
the woman into submission with swear
words instead of explanations. If he
doesn't tell faIsehood, he is sure to
say the wrong thing. Just when "a
woman's heart is aching for balm, he
gives her pepper or chilli sauce. Just
when be should confess all and ask
to be forgiven and appeal to her sym
patty, he gets up on the defensive and
stands there like Marc Antony daring
the Romans to come on Just when
be should be warm and gentle and for
get and forgive, and all that, he hunts
out his dignity and wraps himself in
It until he is about as approachable
as an Indian war chief or-or can
nibal
"The cannibals,' interrupted
Seemed to be the only men who ever
did know how to argue with a woman
effectively. They used club, be
lieve. and settled the dispute with 9
single blow"
~Oh, we'll" said Polly. .sthat was all
right in those days. They didn't hav,
any divorce courts to help them settls
things further, you know"
No." / reflected, that's so; MOI
boxes Of candy and punches Of violetI
and scented note paper and messenger
boys. They had TO come right up t
the situation and face it themselves
without the florist and the United
States mail to help them out"
Polly glanced at me sideways, with
eringlys
" A GIRL she remarked coolly, "whs
would consider box of candy an argu
ment, is not--worth the price Of thu
argument
"Oh, i didn't mean,n said !, depre
catingly, that any woman worth buy
ing could be bought over only mean
that women are like babies. Remove
the cause Of their unhappiness, be it {
bent pin-or another woman-and theI
give them something pretty and attrac
tive-~candy or fiattery-to distrQc
them, and they forget. The best wa.
to reason with woman is not to argu'
with her. Don't try TO prove to he
that two and two make four; jus
agree with her that they make five o
seventeen, and then tell her how prett.
she looks when she's angry, or hoy
much you wanted TO see her when yol
had to 90 to dinner with the othe
woman. or how much you love her.
That said Polly, lis another mas
culine method of convincing woman
why il it a man never seems to wan
TO tell why be did thingY
Because, ! replied. usually b
Goes not know why he did il. Besides