Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1904-01-16

L D1TIN
tuesday night for their guest. Miss Ima
/ rye, of Lexington Hawkinsyille Nkvl
/ Republican.
/ Mrs. Dearborn-T think you have such
! an original husband.
/ Mrs. Wabash-OriSinal nothing. He's
my sixteenth.-ionkers Statesman.
He-And what do you suppose your
father would say if you told him / was
an actor?
She-He'd say Rats" guess
1onkers Statesman.
Elect me President of the United
States, said the Prohibition candidate,
ana "a | will guarantee that my secretary
of the treasury shall see that the money
market never gets tight. Life.
Bacon-They can train dogs to do al
most anything. can't they?
EgbeFt-Why, yes; nv lawyer told me
that the Eskimo dogs are even trained
10 draw conveyauces.-Yo nkers States
man.
George, did You know that l was
going to marry your sister, well;
| heard her say so, but she's had that idea
| about so many other feIlcrs that | didn't
feel sure about it till you told me-
Brooklyn l1te.
Are you superstitious?
Just little," answered young Mrs.
Torkins: whenever l see "A poster an
nouncing race meeting can't help
| thinking it is sign of bad luck
Washington Star.
Had Pull-1he Hare-I hear that
the badgers place was raided by hunt
ing party.
The E HsteINd they catch hin him? 49,,
tipped him off, Brooklyn Life.
Tommy-When YOU want to call per-
son selfish YOU always say he's looking
out for Number One, don't you?
ra-Unless you're speaking of n
widow. my son. She's looking out for
Number Two.-Philadelphia Press.
Kitty believe you think lust as
much of Minnie Hawha as you do of
me.
George-Why, l actually abominate
her!
Kitty.George. YOU are such DEAR
Boston Transcript.
Il don't believe in paying fancy prices
for custom-made clothes" said KIoseman,
Now. here's a suit | bought ready made
for 81. If ! were to tell you paid $40
for it, wouldn't you believe it?"
Il might if you told me over the tele-
phone. Philadelphia Press.
But. Maria, look at that terrible dust
Yes, ma'am.: that's because Master
Jimmie is sick
''Wen, l don't see
He amt been sliding down this morn
ing. -Browning' Magazine
sheriff sold you out o house an
oh. yes-but Providence dped him."
Providence"
Yes; harricane blowed the house
down two minutes after he had levied
on it.'-Atlanta Constitution.
Its Mr.. borough. said the office
boy He says he wants to see you on
very important matter" We'll" re-
be long HIM! ten him I'm afraid
Id be short. Philadelphia Press.
Mr.. Hammerkick-Thep was absolute
ly no taste TO that turkey | bought of
you.
The Progressive Farmer Well. taste
ASH tne main InlnE- mat turkey was
the most nutritious bird | ever sold; it
had been fattened on health food
Brooklyn Life.
Here's a good thing" said Jokeley
over his paper. Here's western wild
over named William Tew. who married
again within "a week of his first wife's
death" And do you call that a good
| thing" demanded his wife. We'll, it's
good arithmetic Twice one is Tew"-
Philadelphia Ledger.
"Do you trust the reformed canni-
balS:' asked the ,eWly arrived MISSION
AIRY.
II try to trust them.' answered the
resident missionary. but it is very diff
cult not 10 be susplcl Gus when | sit down
to one of their me; Is and am offered
mock-turtle soup. Judge.
Mike" said Flooding Pete, what
would You do if you was to wake up and
lind yourself a railway PRESIDENT
II dunno answered Meandering
Mike. Human nature is human nature.
/ s'pose I'd git merrenary an begin to
worry about all de rfdes I've been beat
in de company out of. w ashington
Star.