davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1904-06-20
POETRY VERSUS SCIENCE
Enectives Manner In witch sydney
Ss5s3s Sz,a nth settled n Bore. $


SS5ss Smith settled n Bore.
For sydney Smith to Joke WAS no
great effort. but not even he could al
ways joke SO effectively us in the in
stance mentioned in Memories of Half
a century, Ee wns the guest at din
ner of an archdeacon, at whose table
there were others Of the cloth, among
them one who was greatly Interested
in natural history AS the man rode
his hobby to death he was the prince
rof bores, and his entrance was there
fore viewed with something like con-
sternation. He was uiknown5to sgd
ney Smith. but his peculiarly was
soon laid bare.
..There'll be no talk ut all unless yotl
can manage to floor him. said one of
the men to Smith. Cant you ma mage
it:''
u can try" he returned gala nt!y.
although with some doubt, for there
was no telling to what branch of his
crotchet tue bore would turn.
The dinner began. The one or two
customary toasts. such as The
Queen" and The Church. had been
houored, and there came q iull which
was the bore's opportunity.
Mr.. Archdeacon," said he, "havc you
seen the pamphlet written by my
friend, Professor Dick euSon, on the re-
markable size of the eye in Il common
house tly2"
The arcbdcacon courteously said he
had not had the privilege. and in spite
of the discourag ing looks on the faces
of the guests the bore pursued his adj
vantage.
- can assure you it is q most inter
esting pamphlet, setting forth partlcu-
lars hitherto unobserved as to the usu-
al size of that eye"
Il deny the factr' said q. voice from
the other end of the tn Bile.
All smiled save the bore.
you deny the fact. sir?'' said he.
"AIay ask on what authority you con-
denim the investigations of my learned
frend%'
81 deny the fact" replied the voice.
which was Sydney Smiths, land
base my Genial on evidence welded to
Immortal verse we'll known to every
scholar, at least, at this table"
The emphasis laid on scholar nettled
the naturalist by Its implication. well.
sir he said rs calmly as he was able,
.'will YOU have the kindness to quote
your authority?
81 WILL sir The evidence is those
we'll known. I may say immortal. lines:
"'vVho saw him dep
IT, said the fly,
With my little eye""
The guests roared, and during the
rest of the dinner nothing further was
heard on the subject OF natural history.
New Orleans Picayune.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1904-06-20
BITS ABOUT
HERBERT SPENCER

In his bioSra " Herbert Spencer
says by way OF completing hi est.
mate Of his IA Tiers chafaot eafts5
There remains only5to name the On es
great drawback--he was not kind
crate. ko did not slabitsIaIl displa s7
that sympathy which should eharac
telize the marital relation. 81
uniform habit of deciding on a course
OF conduct and persistlng in u tsS reza
Gard1ess Of circumstances was hers
i1iuriously displayed. He held, foi.S5
instance. that every one should speak
clearly, and that those who al al III ff%5
ought to suffer the resulting CIV
Hence, if he did not understand some
question my mother put he would re-s
main silent; not asking at#the.aues
ticn was and letting it go unansWer-s
ed. He continued this habit M l
through life. Notwithstanding it's fus
tiIity.
of his mother Herbert Spencer
says: Speaking broadI 81 the world
may be divided into those who. de-
serve little and get much ana those
who deserve much and get little. Ny
mother belonged to the latter class Il
and it is a source of unceasinga regret
with me thatI did not do more to pre-
vent her inclusion In this class
Spencer says of himself
haps the most marked moral trait and
that which ran through variety Of
manifestations In boyhood and after
ward was the disregard of authority
Or course, one consequence wa
chronic disobedience'
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1904-06-20
Turkish Customs =.

A writer on Turkey says: BED
steads are not used by the Turks.
Each room contains large cupboard
built into the wall, in which the bed
ding is piled during the day. and at
night the slaves come In when sum
moned to make up the beds on the
floor Other bedroom requisites. in
the shape Of wristbands, dressing
tables and wardrobes, are dispensed
with as superfluous. For everyday
ablution there is small washing room.
with a hole in the floor for the water
to escape through, and If the hanun
would wash her hands and face only
a slave brings the ever and basin and
pours the water over her hands. For
special additions she Will go either to
her own private ham nam or to the
public baths. She does her hair OF
has it done for her. seated crossleSSed
in her corner Of the divnn. and the old
walnut wood chests and Golfers In her
treasure room suffice to store her
gauzes and brocades, her SILKS and en-
broiderieS-"
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1904-06-20
An Hum nntin& Grab.

One of the marine curtosiies fished
some time ago from the bottom of the
Indian ocean was mammoth sen crab
which continually emitted bright
white light similar to that seen in the
spasmodic flashes of phosphorescent
luminosity emitted by the common
glowworm The crab was captured in
the daytime and placed In q large tank
containing specimens OF fish, nothing
peculiar except its Immense size being
noticeable in the broad glare of the
tropical sun. at night, however, when
all was pitchy darkness. the crab lit up
the tank SO that the other creatures in
it could be plainly seen
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1904-06-20
How 4. b. Frost Gu. Coupons

A certain Philadelphia art club has
custom of creating great deal OF run
at the expense of new members to test
their mettle and good fellowship. This.
as may be imagined, is excellent FUN
for the aSScmbllge at large, but IS
often very trying to the lone tarSet OF
it all. Shortly before the election of
A. 3. Frost. the Illustrator of farm
scenes, it was reported that he pos
sessed consiGcra BILE wealth. AT the
first club dinner after Mr.. F'rosts name
had been added to the roll the mem
bers were primed to derive amusement
from his debut
t'Hello, Erost!' called one when the
new mem Der appeared in the dining
ROOM Il hear you are doing nothing
but cutting coupons now"
Yes" answered the artist quickly,
land I'm using the same scissors
used to trim my cuffs with-"-Success-
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1904-06-20
The ,kam%1a Dye Of India.

The kamela dye Of India produces
gorgeous fame color Of varying shades.
according to the process employed. The
dye is merely the powder which coats
the berries of u tree which grows Wild
in many parts of the country. 1t is
brushed off into baskets made for the
purpose and requires no further prcpn-
ration. The red powder is mixed with
alkali obtained by the burning or
plants. after which it is allowed to
stand in water to extract the color
The silk to be dyed is only to be soaked
in the mixture to make it take up the
color. which is afterward fixed with
alum. The dye is pronounced to pos
sess the quality of insurinG Il fast and
durable color. the same result. hc'T-
ever. being claimed to be reached with
the artificial product called arohaviE:l.
and more readily.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1904-06-20
Acquiring q Specimen.

Mrs. Franklin bad always spoken her
mind, and she INTENDED to do it as
long as the gift OF speech was spared
her. Her children and gra ndchildren
knew her habit and found it not al
ways cheering
I'D like to have you tell me what
induced Edith to fall in love with that
young man saw last night for the
first time" said the old lady to one OF
her daughters.
81 think she was Attracted to him at
first because he's such an athletic fel-
low and such u splendid swimmer the
mother Of Edith ventured feebly. after
moments casting about In her mind
for q satisfactory answer.
'Humph" snorted Mrs. Franklin.
(which does she propose to keep him
in after she's married him-a gymna-
SUM or an aquarium ?"
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1904-06-20

I have saloon centrally located for
sale quick. H. H. Lanha N. *
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1904-06-20
church which hi fath eIs i served

church which his father had served
SO years before s$5
ourSnam ethe first OF Your bal
Eis1nat nam s--is unusual ". Senato
suggested an sntervi eMert % Mr. Knoss
the other day Is Ss35
81. gu mean thatI ought to- haSaS
ready. an apology for L ~ he good
naturedly qutred. Wen, have. a ~
though it extends to my middle nams8
also. I was named for 2 hiland err
Chase. who was bishop OF Ohio In 4
the middle OF last centur friend
OF my family, he possessed i ha ad m ss
ration OF my parents II 81 led about
the time | was born I; and tn con Juno
ton of circumstances was seized upon
as a reason for deputizins me to carr
his name along. s5$s3s
Il hevent felt the nam a. to be IA bur-
den, however. And then. that I'll
might not lie resarded as bpastins
a name wholly unique have passed
it on. iii turn. He also bears l.ss5s
The Senator pointed as he spoke
to his youngest SON Philander sllasss.
5r.. sturdy SoGngser, who had
driven up in a smart little trap wi Ia
three juvenile companion s.P ttsbl,rss5
Times
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1904-06-20

In Ceylon there is a tree called
Ewes apple tree" which is rema rk-
able in that the orange red fruit is
beautiful to look upon, yet out Of each
fruit a piece appears TO have been bit
ten 1t is said that the stimulation Of.
a fruit which has. been bitten into is
perfect For this reason and because
the fruit is deadly poison the ma
tives declare that It Is the same tree
which grew in the garden Of Eden
and it IS III perpetual reminder Of din-3
.obedient act $ss
al Trimmed Hats Reducedss.L4 at:
The Bon ron. s;ss X
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1904-06-20
The PrImitsvc BOOK.

The oldest books in existence are.
doubtless. those OF the Babylonians,
but the great perm al ency of these is
explained by the material Of which
they are composed. and it does not
follow that they were the first books
to be made. We know that the Esyp-
tians employed n papyrus roll from the
earliest historical periods and that the
Hindoos made their palm leaf books Il t:
a very early day In short. every civ
ilized nation is discovered at the very
dawn Of its history in full possession
Of a system of book making 1t IS Inn
possible to decide the question as tc.
whether one nation borrowed from nm
other in developing the id ca of BOOK
ma king Harper's agazine.
5 have a saloon centrally located for.
sale quick. H H. zLanhaEn. *
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1904-06-20
OUR PUZZL|INlI
LANGUAGE

English is said to be one Of the
most difficult languages for foreign
er to learn The verbs and pirepos
sitions are particularly puzzling.
professor in Columbia School 8o OF
Mines tells OF the troubles Of RI
Frenchman with the verb TO break
81 begin to understand your Ian
guage better said my French
friend. NJ. DeBeauvolr to me. sbntgs
your verbs trouble me still. on mi
them up so with propositions.
Il saw your. friend, Mrs. ;Berk
just now he continues. .zShe&said Z
she intends to break down her school
earlier than usual. Am RICH t
rhere?''
Break up her school, she
have said"
-.oh. yes, remember: brea
school.
why does she do that a asked .s1
Because her health is broken &c.
Broken down - s
Broken down2 9, yes. Ana 81
her town iS
Broken out
t'She thinks she will leave ID for
few weeks
VIII she leave her house alone
mo she is afraid 1t will be broken
do I say. that ~
Broken int o. = $Sss3
Certainly; it is what Z meant to
say
rs her son to be married. soon
No; that engagement Is bro s3S
broken =} sNS
Yes broken off,.
ssAh, had not heard that AL ss
She is very sorry about III Her
son only broke the news down tn her
last week. Am ight am anx-s,,
ious to speak English well .'S
He merely broke the news; sss
proposition this line. 81 81
:. is hard to tlIlderst a q
young man, her son, sS III
fel1ow--a breake 1 S ss s
broker
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1904-06-20

"Ah! Miss Strong, you're regular
Venus, z said Jack Nervy, as he az
tempted to kiss her
.5s4 Indeed 2" she replied. as she gave
him a right arm jolt on the nose and
followed it up with a left arr, swing
on the Jaw, "but fortunately III no
Venus de Nil Philadelphi Press
Sistersville daily oil review. [volume] (Sistersville, W. Va.) 1902-1905, 1904-01-23
WOWen and Jewels.

Jewels, candy, flowers, man
that Is the order of woman's pref
erences. Jewels form a magnetic
mighty power to the average wo.
man. Even that greatest OF all
Jewels, health, Is often ruined In
the strenuous effort to save the
money to purchase them. If a
woman will risk her health to get
a coveted gem. then let her fortify
herself against the insiduous conse,
quences of coughs, colds and bron
chial affections by regular use r.
DR.. Boschee's German Syrup. II
will promptly arrest consumption
in IT. early stages and heatl the az
fected lungs and bronchial tubes
and drive the dread disease from
the system. 1t Is not a cure all
but 1t Is certain lure for coughs
colds and all bronchial troubles.
You can get DR.. Green's reliable
remedies at D. A. Memberships
Get Greer's Special Almanac.
Sistersville daily oil review. [volume] (Sistersville, W. Va.) 1902-1905, 1904-01-23
A Good Doc.

The man wanted to sell the dog
but the prospective buyer was su>-
piciouS and finally decided not to
buy. The man then told him why
he was so anxious to sell.
"You see" he said. Il bought the
dog and trained him myself. | 90;
him so he'd bark if Il person stepped
inside the gate and thought, CT
course, | was safe from burglars
Then my wife wanted me to tran
him to carry bundles, and | did. !;
you put anything into his mouth ii
would stay there till some one took
it away. Well, one night | woke
up and heard some one in the mex
room. l got up, grabbed my guI
and started to investigate. They
were there, three of them and Tho
dog"
"Didn't he BARK" interrupted
the man.
"Not bark; he was too busy"
"Busy! What doing::'
"Carrying the lantern for th(
burglars. If YOU know anybody WILT
wants a good doc send him around.
Sistersville daily oil review. [volume] (Sistersville, W. Va.) 1902-1905, 1904-01-23
BIRDS IN THE ARCTIC.
The Spring Rush That Breaks the Mo-
notony of the Year.

The one great break in the mo-
notony Of the whole year along the
arctic coast is the coming of the
birds in the spring. The nature of
it is almost violent. The last Of
May they begin to arrive. The notes
of the first few corners are musical
and buoy one with feeling of mes
sages from home and friends. But
the stream of birds rapidly grows,
and the few first joyous notes merge
into a ceaseless, hidcous, distracting
din that robS one of tis rest and for
a few days becomes mbearable.
Swans, cranes, geese, brant, ducks,
gulls and terms swoop down upon
the coast by thousands. The old
birds are delighted at the sight of
the old family nesting ground and
the young ones at reaching once
more their birthplace, and the thou
sands of them are all talking and
screaming at the same time. The
contrast Of the now endless days of
sunshine and abundant and animat-
ed life with that Of the still arctic
night is very great.
In few days, however, each hap
py family has settled down in its
own little home, and quietude reigns
supreme through the short summer,
and then again sets in the long soil
tudinous night.
Many interesting things may be
learned of the birds that annually
visit the arctic coast for the pur-
pose of bringing up their families
of their reasons for going there and
of the intelligence displayed BY
them in many ways. They have not
the enemies there they have farther
south. The fox is very nearly their
only foe, and they find so many ways
Of avoiding it that it would surely
20 very hungry were it dependent
on birds for food. Little islands IN
lakes and streams that arc free from
foxes become great nesting places,
and the birds swarm to them until
on many Of them every available
space suitable for nesting is pre-
empted.-From Camp Life In Are
tic America" by Andrew j. Stone,
in ScribnerS.
Sistersville daily oil review. [volume] (Sistersville, W. Va.) 1902-1905, 1904-01-23
Farming In the South.

The Passenger Department Of
the Illinois Central Railroad Com
pany Is issuing monthly circulars
concerning fruit growing, vegetable
gardening, Stock raising, dairying
etc, In the States of Kentucky,
West Tennessee, Mississippi, and
Louisiana. Every Farmer, or
Homeseeker, who will forward his
name address to the undersigned,
will be mailed free Circulars Nos.
1913, q. and S, and others as they
are published from month to month.
E. A. RICHTER,
Travelling Passenger Agent. Park
building, Pittsburg. Pa.-I12
Sistersville daily oil review. [volume] (Sistersville, W. Va.) 1902-1905, 1904-01-23
DAMON AND PYTHIAs

Oue OF the sterling attractions OF
the season Is F. r. Hallam's snmp-
tuous revival of Damon and
Pythias" and playgoers will be
pleased TO hear that 1t will be seer
at the Auditorium on Tuesday
night There are some plays that
never grow old and Damon and
Phthias" belongs to this class. The
story Is of such absorbing interest.
the sentiment so noble and the
characters so intensely human that
the popularity of the play IS not to
be wondered at. The management
has spared no expense to make the
present revival one of the best pre-
sensations the play has ever been
given. A magnificent scenic equip
ment has been provided, the cos
tunes are all new, elaborate and
and correct and the acting
company could not be improved
upon. George A. P. Johnson
has played the role of Damon over
1000 times. He Is brilliant young
actor who has made this famous
role peculiarly his own. Frank
Angus, the Pythias, Is one of the
greatest legitimate actors Of the
day. Harry D Clifton, the Dlony-
sius, played this same role formerly
with Fl derick Warde and Louis
James. Monica Lee, the Calanthe,
was prominent with Maud Adams
and Virginia Wardour won sue
cess recently In "Romeo and JULIE
and "In the Palace of the King"
The other members Of the company
are all we'll known players on the
legitimate stage.
Sistersville daily oil review. [volume] (Sistersville, W. Va.) 1902-1905, 1904-01-23
500 Reward 800

The readers of this paper will be
pleased to learn that that there Is
at least one dreaded disease that
science has been able to cure In all
Its stages and that Is Catar'h. Halls
Catarrh Cure is the o"ly positive
cure now known TO the medicine
fraternity. Catsrrh being con-
stitutional disease requires a COZ
stitutional treatment. Halls Ca
tarrh Cure Is taken internally, act
Ing directly upon the blood and
mucous surfaces of the system,
thereby destroying the foundation
of the disease, and giving the pa
tient strength by building up the
constitution and assisting nature In
doing Its work. The proprietors
have so much faith In Its curative
powers, that they offer one Hundred
Dollars for any case that 1t fails to
cure. Send for list Of testimonials.
Address,
F. J. Cheney & Co., Toledo, o.
Sold by druggists, 75c.
Halls Family Pills are the best
Sistersville daily oil review. [volume] (Sistersville, W. Va.) 1902-1905, 1904-01-23
A Cold tnIthe- Head.

Is simply mildiform of catarrh.
Use that which cleanses and heals
the diseased membrane. Bunsens
Catarrh Cure Is the remedy. Cures
catarrh easily and pleasantly, con =
tains DO mercury or other injurious
drugs. 1t Is quickly absorbed,
gives instant relief and opens and
cleanses the nasal passages. Regu-
lar size soc. Ask your druggist for
free sample and pamphlet telling
about catarrh. For sale by D. A.
Henderson,.
Sistersville daily oil review. [volume] (Sistersville, W. Va.) 1902-1905, 1904-01-23
In the District Court Of the United States
for the Northern District Of West Va.

In the matter of W. M. Stewart,
bankrupt. In bankruptcy.
To the creditors of w. M. Stew
rrt, of Hebron, In the county of
Tyler, and district aforesaid,a bank.
rupt.
Notice Is hereby given that on
the 18th day IF January, A. D.
1904, the said W. M. Stewart was
duly adjudged bankrupt; and that
the first meeting Of his Creditors
will be held at the law Office of
George W. Johnson, in the City of
Parkersburg, W, Va, on the goth
day of January, 1904 at 10 O'Clock
In the forenoon, at which time the
said creditors MAY attend, prove
their claims, appoint trustee, ex-
anime the bankrupt and transact
such orher business as may properly
come before said meeting.
GEO W. JOHNSON,
Referee In bankruptcy.
Parkersburg, W. Va, January
I4th, 1904. 1893
Sistersville daily oil review. [volume] (Sistersville, W. Va.) 1902-1905, 1904-01-23
Hoppe s.u won.

Some Years ago a remarkable
wager was made between Captain
Machell, a racing celebrity, and am
other officer who was noted for his
activity. Captain Machell bet his
fellow officer SO that he would not
hop up certain flight of stairs
"two at a time" The bet was tax
en-; but, as there were forty-one
steps in the flight, he found after
taking twenty hops that he was LEI,
only one step to negotiate and had
lost his bet. He accused Captain
Machell Of sharp practice, but Ma
chell replied, well, III bet YOU an
other SO | do it, The officer
thinking to get back his money. a"
cepted the bet. Captain Machca
then hoped up forty steps in tive:
ty hops and, hopping back one, ii"
ished by going ~ the last two >tcH
and Won.
Sistersville daily oil review. [volume] (Sistersville, W. Va.) 1902-1905, 1904-01-23
For sale at Opera House Drugstore
Pacific Coast Without Change

In new Pullman ordinary
sleepers, wide vestibuled and with
every modern convenience, In
charge of competent agent, from
Cincinnati to Chicago via Louis
Vile, New Orleans, Houston, San
Antonio, 81 Paso and Los Angeles
to San Francisco. Rates for berths
less than half of cost In regular
sleepers. For free descriptive mat.
ter and full particulars, address E.
A. Richter, Trav. Pass. Agent,
Illinois Central Railroad, Park
Building, Pittsburg, Pa. 1I2 II
Sistersville daily oil review. [volume] (Sistersville, W. Va.) 1902-1905, 1904-01-23
Botha's Remarkable Escape.

Among the interesting stories told by
Lord Roberts is the following: "F"m.
mand#nt Ben BUtLa told me when iii
London Il few months ago That on on"
occasion during the war he did not
retreat with the rest OF the Beers. but
slept the night Of May - in GrrmSi-
ton. within a few hundred yards 81
where | was sleeping. and that he was
only able to escape the next morning
by joining one of our mounted patrols
and passing himself off as COloniSt
in our employ. That is Il difficulty we
always had. The Beers could come
and go in our Camp without our know
ing who they were, as we had many
people of the country in our employ.
Botha actually joined one of our pa
trolls and rode with him 10 the top Of
the hill. when he gaIlopCd off and join.
ed his own people again
Sistersville daily oil review. [volume] (Sistersville, W. Va.) 1902-1905, 1904-01-23
Meeting of Stockholders

SIsrERsYILLE, VIVA, Dec e, %
Notice of The annual meeting OF
the stock holders of the Melrose
OIL & Gas Co will be held at their
Offices In the Farmers & Producers
Bank Building Sistersville, W. Va,
on January goth Ie 4, fof the cleo
ton of directors and any other
business that may come before the
meeting.
Melrose OH & Gas Co.
L. c. WILSON, Prest.
A. W. LEONARD, Sec'y.
IL 24Imo
Sistersville daily oil review. [volume] (Sistersville, W. Va.) 1902-1905, 1904-01-23
Notice to Stockholders.

Notice is hereby given that the
annual meeting of the stockholders
of the Quinto Oil Co, will be held
at their Office at 100 Mckinley St.,
Sistersville. West Virginia on the
last Saturday In January, 1924, to
wit January 80, 1874, to elect off
GERS, and transact any other bust
ness that may come before the
meeting.
Given under our hands this sec.
ond day of January, 1904.
P. 81. GAFFNEY
los. A. KENNEDY Pres
Secretary.
z limo