Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1904-05-27
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Mamie--What is biology? Gladys
suppose It's the science of shopping.
Bobbles-What does this author
mean by saying that the hero had
"well-caryed' features? Dobbles---
Perhaps he shaved himself
Il wonder what makes my eyes so
weak" said an ultra Radical once 10
Mr.. Disraell. why, they are in
weak place" said the latter.
Little Willie-Say. pa, how does IN
army scour the country? Pa-With
brushes, my son. Little Willle-With.
brushes? Pa-Yes. brushes with the ,
enemy.
her much when he died? Belle He
left enough to make her comfortable.
but not enough to get her second
husband Life.
Waiter--Will you try course din
ner? Country Groom-No. sir; no
coarse dinner for us. Bring us In the
finest one you've got. We don't come
down to the city every day; do we.
Matilda?
He-Do you know. dear, was just
upstairs looking at baby and | be.
lieve she has got your hair She :
tspringing up)--Good gracious! .
thought I had put that switch out of :
the child's reachl ~, 4,
Did you ever see the Dardanelles
while you were In Europef" NO" :
answered Mr.. Cumrox You see, we
were SO busy sightseeing that we !
didn't have time to call OH any OF our
friends. Washington Star. 80
First Boy-And because you couldnt-
find penny to pay the fare, did the
conductor make you get off the omm- :
bus and walk? Second Boy--No, he
only made me get Off. l could have
sat In the road II wanted to--fit
Bits -
"A tall bride is the best-looking,
don't you think7" "Well," replied the :
titled Englishman who had caught on
I to a little American slang, 80 far as
I am personally concerned, l certainly
am not looking for one who is short.
Chicago Evening Post +.
The army officer looked with dis.
pleasure at the soiled sheet of paper d.
that had been handed him. That's
measly looking document" he exa
claimed. "Yes, SIR said the subor- :
dinate, touching his hat. IT'S the
sick nst"-Chicago Tribune. -.
Edyth-Yes, you see she told the
count that her fathers partner had
robbed him of nearly all his wealth,
just to test his love for her. Mayme--
And then? Edyth-He asked her for
letter Of introduction to the daughter :
Of her fathers partner.-Chicago
News. ~-,. -
JOHNNY wish my folks would
agree upon one thing and not keep
me all the time In worry. Tommy
What have they been doing now?
Johnny--Mother won't let me stand
on my head, and dad is all the time
fussing because | wear my shoes out
so fast.
Mistress (returning from holiday
Why, Bridget. whatever has become
of the parrot? Bridget-Well, you see,
mum. after you left it looked u Bit
pining like and didn't talk much; $50
the cook and put it out of its misery.
poor thing and | had it stuffed for !
my new 'at.-Judy.
They say" said Mrs Oldcastle.
that Mr.. Faddlethwaite, who used
to belong to our church, has become
an agnostic' rs that SO? Josiah
used TO take his lunch at the same
place he did down town, and he says
he often warned him that he'd get it
II he didn't give up eatin' so fast
Chicago Record Herald.
They had been married only three
short weeks, and he was actually In.
terested In his paper ut the dinner
table. Darling" she began In Il tone
meant to be reproachful, "do You love
me Just as much as you ever did,
Sure thing" he answered briefly.
She ought to have been satisfied TO
let 1t go at that, but she wasn't.
"Why?" she asked. Don't know"
he replied Just a fool habit I've got
into, l suppose" Then for seventeen
consecutive seconds silence reigned.
supreme-Chicago News.
At the first performance on the new
church organ no one in the audiences,
was better pleased than the maid em,,
ployed in the organists family. so
YOU liked the music. did you. Mary )
said the organist the next morning.
reports of her enthusiasm having
reached his ears ''0h,.sit. was Just
grand" replied Mary. the .grapdest., :,
/ ever heard" 'NNhat did yon like
best?" asked the orgnnist, lltigcd hy
the glowing eulogy. "Oh;f don't know
that" said Mary. But there was one
place where you came down With
both hands and your feet AT the sam,
time: that was about the best, II
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