The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1904-06-26

In the year A. d. 1904, between latl-
tude 10 deg. 81 min. and n deg. IS
min. north and I54 deg. 50 min and
100 deg. go min. w. longitude, huge
bat-like apparition was to be seen how
ering about in the heavens To make
a short story long, this was none other
than an air ship from the planet Mars,
and its passengers were three men more
or less wise The man who was steer
ing at this particular moment was one
Letter-Go. He guided and watched
while his companions were wrapped IN
meditation--for the Martians slufnber
not, neither do they sleep. They were
out for an afternoon junketing tour in
the planetary system. Letter-Go arous-
ed one of his companions, who was
named Bag-o-Wynde, with
"What no! l see in the watery ex-
panse below on the planet earth, little
specks that [ wot not Of
"Say you so, Letter-Go," said Bag
o-Wynde, '1et me consult chart and
compass. Methinks this is region
called Hawaii which was reduced to
ruin by blow pipe that pierced the
crust OF the planet Earth. Yes, tits plain
to be seen. That large caldron is Dia-
mond Head, and the smaller one Pud-
din Head, Punch Head, let me see, ah,
yes, Punchbowl. When these hills belch-
ed forth, the city was oyertaken by a
shower of lava and ashes, and a cloud of
sulphuric smoke enwreathed the entire
island. Many of the inhabitants fed
to the waters edge and made good their
escape in floating houses, while others
were overtaken in their daily round and
transfxed by the fiery flood or by the
weight OF ashes. See, with what dia-
bolical beauty the caldrons yet bubble
and frolic. Our people made i1vestiga-
tons and excavations some years after,
and found many things of interest about
this people of our neighboring world"
Found they any living creatures :"
asked Gul1-i-bul, who was the third and
last man.
sOnly one man seemed to have en-
joyed staying after this erratic action
on the part of the invisible powers. If
he was representative citizen, they
were a mighty race. The man was tall
and muscular He had discarded his
clothing, and was living next to Ma
lures heart, on next to nothing and was
thriving Our people came upon him
sitting meath a mango tree eating a
mongoose, which is the fruit of that tree.
They lassoed him, but he languished in
captivity. He would talk of nothing but
the laws of health. He was a man of
letters. We have preserved all his
manuscript. The spelling of that day
and age was forsooth quite unique An
other Iine specimen that was unearthed
was a young man who had been over
taken while engaged in playing favor
tie game with bat and ball He was
found clinging to the bat with death
grip. We have him preserved in our
Museum. surrounded by his playthings"
Gould this Nature Man tell you
nothing?"
Upon inquiry of him all he could say ,
was something that sounded like SON /
ny"
"How pathetic!"
One man was found in the act of
running swiftly up Merchant boulevard,
Win outStretCled arms. / ne ashes over /
came him and he was dug out intact
Close at his heels followed another
and younger man, who seemed to take
an equal interest in the chase, and was
cheering his master on; slave or body
servant, mayhap."
All" said Gull-i-Bul "hastening
from his place of business at the first
intimation of danger to protect home
and family: the divine trait in man and
even in the animal Beautiful"
SO it at first seemed, but in re-
vised edition the historian relates that at
the end of the boulevard there was found
spendthrift guardianship with a fee
attached, and this man of law was run
ming to grab the plum
"Ah"
Gone of the survivors," continued