, 1904-02-23
HOMEL|EsT Of MEN
HE is BEING HUNTED OUT FOR
EXHIBITION PURPOSES AT
ST. LOUIS EXPOSITION.
Confined to osceoIa, Iowa, But Lara
mic Would Not Be in it Anyway,
For Lack Of MateriaI-Good
Story Told IN President Lincoln
In Connection With the Contest.

'Aosl "hi'oihS 'o'ih5 'ohl'sbS st' III
augurated in connection with a free
trip to the Worlds fair is just an
nounced from Osceola, Iowa. where a
local cigar manufacturing company
proposes to reward physical ugliness
most handsomely. The unliest man in
Osceola county, under the terms OF
the voting contest, is to be sen to the
Worlds fair. armed with a round trip
ticket. money to pay his hotel bill and
tickets of admission to the exposition
for II week-all gratis.
Every person buying II of the five
cent cigars manufactured by the o
Germ that is conducting the contest is
entitled to deposit n vote for his fav-
orite homely man, thereby expressing
his opinion as to the identity of the
ugliest citizen of the county. In order
to protect all voters from possible
wrath. the ballots are to be secret.
No one Is to know who casts the votes
though the progress of the contest is TO
be published from time to time in the
local papers. so that all may know
what candidate is in the lead and how
the others stand.
The man receiving the largest num-
Der of votes between Jan. | and July
l will be declared elected. When he
starts for the Worlds air he will be
accompanied to the railroad station
by a brass band and a delegation Of
citizens. including the prettiest girl
from each township in the county.
There will be farewell speeches and
%banquets. M possibly the pretty
girls may be permitted to kiss the
lucky ugly man goodby.
1t is stated by the Worlds fair cor
respondent at Osceola hat there is a
great stir among ugly men throughout
the country. Some of the Osceola men
who have been tactily suspected of
nominees throughout their careers
have taken to the woods. Others
known to be in danger have begun
wearing more attractive clothing, keep
ing their whiskers and hair trimmed,
and %cultivating winsome smiles,
But there are several men in the
county, it is stated. who acknowledge
that they are homely-glory init, in fact
and have put themselves into the
race as avowed candidates for the hon
or OF representing Osceola county at
the Worlds fair. These men are ask
ing their friends to help them win.
Like political candidates. they are out
lar, is said to have announced his in
%tention of making a thorough canvass
OF the county, exhibiting himself in
each town. township. crossroads set
Element and little red schoolhouse, sc
that all smokers of five-cent cigars
may take note of his nominees and
peal him in mind when casting their
ballots. A rival candidate declares
that he will buy up a large quantity
of the cigars himself, casting the votes
for himself, and present the cigars to
his friends as an inducement to get
them to buy more cigars and cas- more
votes. 1t is quite legitimate, he claims,
for a candidate to pass around the ci-
gars-it is done in every election.
The Osceola correspondent says that
during this cold weather the candi-
dates are not so active as they will be
when balmy spring arrives. 1t is ex-
pected that they will bestir themselves
vigorously about the first OF April, and
that even some of those who have
taken to the woods to keep from be
coming candidates may become sc
highly interested in the contest that
they will return to town and announce
their candidacy.
In this connection it may not be
amiss to relate the story of Abraham
Lincoln and the homely man, When
Mr.. Lincoln was a young lawyer he
came face to face with a remarkably
ugly man. The men stopped and star
ed at each other.
Sir. I am going to kill you." cried
the stranger.
"And why, may l ask" coolly in
CURED Lincoln. What have you
against me, sir?"
81 have nothing against you-noth
ing whatever was the reply. I'm
fact, am very sorry that must kill
you, but there is no way to get around
it. If | let you live l shall be breaking
my solemn word of honor, and that,
sir, | cannot afford to do. Have you
any messages t o send to your folks,
or would you like to pray?"
But first tell me-" insisted Lincoln,
"how it happens that you have got to
kill me?"
Simply this way. sir replied the
stranger. Many years ago / was pro
nounced the ugliest nan on earth, and
I gloried in the honor. l made a sol
emn vow that if I ever found another
mar who was uglier than myself l
would kill him."
Lincoln looked searchingly at the
stranger.
DO you think l am an uglier man
than you?" he asked.
Il do"
Then kill me at once" said Lincoln.
The sequel to this story is that the
,ol, man biohIx, nomplimopted nv thfa