Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1904-11-16
Stranded ON SALT RIVER.
Political HumOFist Writes Current History Of Promi
nent Men and Affairs
SPARTA W,s N

J
asking me how La Toilette and th
stalwarts come out in the election, yes
terday, will say Bob La Toilette ha
played them to S lare.you- well, has car
ried every thing, including that cit,
that was made famous by a certainskinC
of beer. And the staIwarts are now II
about the same position that the old foo
mule was when he got unto the railroad
track and was disemboweled by the en-
gine. The train having been stopped til,
brakeman went back to view the re
mains. A9 he drew near to the carcas,
the conductor shouted rs the mule
dead? The brskeman's answer was
prompt and In firm and steady voice
mot entirely dead, but discouraged. >
rms seems to be the .tuation of the
stalWarts at the present time. Yes,
there Is man by the name of Quarles
VINO claims TO hive at one time resided
| in Wisconsin. You asked regarding a
man by the ne,Ae of Babeock, who was
running for congress in the Third dis
trict, Can't say that ! know the man.
but there was q man that went by the
name of 'Bab who was unfortunately
| caught out in political cyclone whose
turbulent waves rose mountain high
and the great man had hard work 70
keep his head above the roaring ele-
ments of political indignation, but he
was finally washed ashore on the north
fork of Salt creek and was secured by 81
La Toilette game warden, who informed
US that the first words that Bah" ut
tered were, Are Spooner and Quarles
on earth?" The good game herder at
once tried 10 make the matter clear to
his dazed vision and informed him that
the records and political chart had be-
come waterioged and sunk. And the
last person that saw them alive was
man by the Dame of Pister, and at that
time they We're on the island of despair,
waving their wig wag flags FOR help.
This information was not encouraging
to Bah" but the good Samaritan Of
the game fields told him to forget al
his small troubles and to cast his eye
over the magnificent results that were
brought about by the uniting o. the
stalwarts and democrats.
You ask regarding the Parker demo-
Gratis Can't say / ever saw one. But,
say, Jim, l did see bunch Of men with
a-sheep-k look on their faces
putting on sack cloth and ashes and at
the same time gazing on the political
horizon at the face Of William Jennings
Bryan, the only star that did not go
down in the democratic heavens You
ask Did l vote for Theodore Roose-
velt2' would like to ask you Is there
a man in the United States who did not
vote for him2' Why he is 80 popular
that The democrats forgot that they had
candidate and all turned in and voted
for Teddy. Yes it was hard Oh that man
down at Esopus, but sou snow he is 3
good bather and in time the odium will
be washed away. While there Is life
there is hope
But say, Jir1, 1t uunerves me to an.
swer the last part Of your letter, How
about our old friend Geo w Peck 2
/ Why. Jim, ii was simply heart render.
| ing TO see that good man sunk in mid
ocean, struggling with a bunch of gold
| democrat" on one side and the congre
! gated mass Of stalwarts on the other
! And now the good man lies buried faith
oms deep, showed under by La Toilette
! ballots. But in commoration of his past
! services to the grand old state of Wis
cousin they will erect q monument In
! the public square st the city Of Oshkosh,
| that being the place in which the das.
| tardiy plot was laid that snuifed out the
political life of our old friend Geo. w.
| Pec'-. His record is going 10 be carved
\ on that monument and skill read az fol
| lows In the year 1892 Cieu W. Peck
was nominated aud elected governor OF
| Wisconsin by the people, defeating one
| John @ SpOoner Nominated and elected
again in 1894 serving With distinction
as chief executive Of this great state foI
two terms Was honorably discharged
and retired to private life But ia 1904
| he foolishly listened to tale Of woe and
again went aboard Of the old democratic
| ship during 8 love feast arranged and
concocted by the peculiar element Of the
two old par ,-es known as stalwartism
| The pilot at large of this wonderful
| combination Of which there was no word
| in the English language by which &c
designate it, was republican stalwarc
| He not being familiar with the old dem
cratic stream failed to see the light
| hOuses and was deaf to the for horns
| that had been placed to guide them dowT
the channel of popular government, and
! in his desperation he scuttled the old
democratic ship and she went down IN
to the whirlpool Of public indignation
| politically buried with ali on board
| The last sad rites of this tragic even
was performed By the ever faithful game
wardens-6j in number and one at large
Thesinspiring ceEmony was closed witt
that beautiful song entitled In tht
| Springtime Gentle Annie, when the Rob
ins nest again.
This tells the story Of the political sit
uation in this state, and Jim, / wan
You to shed sympathetic tear for in th'
state all eyes are dry and tears refuse e
| flow Respectfully yours.
TguC.prrLyY3 I A xs7N-