The sun., 1904-07-18
LIVE ToPI<s ABOUT TOWN.

"The newest thing know" said Luther
Little, censor. fashidner and dist ributor OF
party literature. news and fact at Republic
can headquarters In the Fifth Avenue
Hotel. lis an attachment to piscatorial
narrative that I am afraid will pound ira
dition out OF shape and reduce fish story
telling from an art TO nero mechanical
construction. II 1t should happen to catch
on among the angling guild This is 1t. "
And Mr.. Little produced the following:
STATE OF RHODE ISLAND.
NEWPORT. SIS:
in ha the G Ssw Ssvnh aSa s Gsa nf
appeared before me, John n; Girdner. NJ, d.
personally known 70 me. who being duly sworn
true II e1Sty pastlosisf pas slsfr n'!''0 aS'neo
lsEALl Notary Public.
The letter thereto attached was from
Pr J; Il lie, Girdner Of this e'ity The % meat 81 q
Block Island. fourteen swordAsh' that
July twenty-three swordf1sh that weighed
$500 pounds dressed.
II don't mean this afidavit' writes Pr.
Jones. Ed Gilmore and others who cit In
the Amen Corner and say they have killed
fish, for know they sit there and dare even
to tackle sharks. But let EN- dare tackle
an amdav1t once and bring 1t In, linen they
Will hear me call the waiter
An Irishnan was brought before the
Magistrate In one Of the city police courts
not long ago on a charge Of assault. The
complainant was Hebrew pedler Of whips.
His battered countenance offered indis-
putable evidence that he had been soundly
thrashed. The facts In the case were that
fho a1 al II vL1
a cabman, whip. The Irishman started
change. and the pedler became agitated
for fear that his whip would be stolen, and
sailed into the cabby. who did not have o
scratch on him.
The Magistrate listened gravely to the
evidence and then said: 1T is clear that
and therefore, in view OF the faces Of the
contestants my decision is that it was an
unavoidable accident
'The man who could get a corner on the
egg market just In little old Manhattan
Island alone, said produce dealer. could
shut up shop at the end Of year and have
good time for the rest Of his life. It takes
more than 80, 900 900 dozens Of eggs q year
to keep the island in omelets, eggnogs
and the other things that can't be made
without eggs. They cost on an average
rs cents a dozen for EN-. That figures up
cash.
'Those eggs come from all over tho
country. II New York State, New Jersey,
Pennsylvania, and Massachusetts, should
turn over to the Manhattan Island mark ct
every egg their hens lay. they would no
to go out West, down South. and even
to Canada to get enough
AT q social gathering at my house the
other evening" said we'll known New
York physician. Il had as guests eight
men, every one Of whom is or has been a
potent factor in the affairs Of this city, in
politics. finance, the legal and medical
professions. journalism and railroad man
agement. 1t came out that not one Of them
was a native Of the city. Not only was
none Of them a native New Yorker, but,
with one exception, they were all born in
isolated rural hamlets or on backwoods
farms. The one exception WAS born in
an Incorporated village Of 900 inhabitants.
There was but one college graduate among
them. He was a physician. One, lawyer
was graduated from high school: The
old-time district school had provided all
the schooling the other five ever had, and
one of those, a railroad official, had not
attended even q district school since he
was years old"
1t was 2 A. M The cop on tho corner
was holding a conversation with the lone
waiter, who stood at the door Of the dingy
little all night restaurant five or six doors
down the CROSS street. They had to talk
very loud to make their voices reach each
other, so the stealthy tread OF a second
ron was unhearCi by them
whats this9" sang out the newcomer
as he came within range Grating on
my post?'
on the corner And what would / be
doing that for? All that's left on your post
when you get through is a few stale fsh
balls. Come over on my post and ~ show
on every block See?'
The man who straps you into the seat Of
loop -the-loop wagon at Coney Island says
that the number of drunks who want to take
the thrilling ride for its sobering effect is
becoming embarrassing. A Coney Island
policeman who fell from grace on the beat
ia said to have discovered the principle He
was pretty far gone when he took a notion
to loop-the-loop. He ked itso we'll that he
kept on looping until he'd gone around
sober as a judge.
The word was passed around, and now
the Coney Island visitor who has made too
he reports home. OF course, Il man is
too far gone the attendant won't take the
risk Of letting him in the car. It's sug-
gested that the little thrill Of fear which
You feel when you're whirled upside down
does the business.