New-York tribune., 1904-09-18
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

Old fashioned keepers Of eating houses in sws-
den charge a smaller amount for women's meals
than for those OF men, on the theory that women.
a rule. do not exert themselves physically
with much stress and strain do. and.
therefore the feminine appetite is smaller than
the masculine. II IS hardly necessary TO add that
there are no old fashioned Swedish hoteIkeepers
in ST. Louis while the Worlds Fair is in progress.
BALI-ADEs@OF THE WATER WAGON.
And Guzzie tubs OF foamIng beer
Or bowl up on a quicker plan
and n68 6aHS apa SP'6 then SF s@& oat wow
Anon to drop a drunken tear;
I'm on the water wagon now.
What profit is it to a man
To muddle up his running gear
And make his head go like a fan
Himself but always on the veer,
And wears his hat aslant ono ear?
I'm on the water wagon now.
How silly It's the wine 70 scan
When Il is shining red and clear,
Ard Ii fqddIe idle up 90 9ne's 5 rdItd5 thinning pan
TO I'll n the -, night ,., with gy gTisiy fear
I'm the water wagon now.
L'ENvo1.
Gambrinus, prince. I'll vote this year
For Swallow: have made my vow:
No more the booze shal domineer.
-CChicago Chronicle
Down in Virginia town the aged pastor OF one
Of the churches fell i'll not long ago according n
The Washington Post" He was beloved bv all
the neighborhood and constant stream OF anx-
ious friends rang the bell to make inquiries The
nurse in charge was intelligent negro woman
and she decided to issue bulletins at FREQUENT IN
tervals She wrote them herself and pinned them
to the front door. and this is the way they read
they appeared successively: Rev Blank am
very sick" ''Iater-Rev. Blank am worse
Blank have sunk"
Easy Politics when you first entered politics."
did you set out With the determination to win at
mo" answered seator Sorghum. "I set out with
the determlnation TO win at as little expense as
possible. -(Washington Star.
The leviathans OF the deep which have been
constructed in recent years are coming 10 New
York with enormous multitudes OF steerage pas-
senGers, too many of them OF extremely moor
quality for future American citizenship ana ex
ceedingly difficult OF assimilation Ellis Island fs
overwhelmed with It's burdens and police depart
ments and relief societies hardly know which wav
TO turn Cutting rates for transportation over
has many disagreeable seduels
Jack and Harry. hunting trouble
Tried to run Dads autO-bubble-
pad found found some shreds OF cuffs and collars.
Ana signed, There goes thousand dollarsP'
-(IAfe.
The dons and the hidalgos OF the country of Ger
vantes do not invariably bubble over with a senss
OF humor. 1t Is reported that In a Spanish city a
suggestion was made for the raising of money for
the benefit or the Society for the Prevention OF
Cruelty to Animals in that province. The appeal
was taken mp easerIy. and in a short time one az
the most exciting bull fights ever seen In that
part OF the land of the Cid aroused the widest
enthusiasm Of multitude OF spectators Ths
profits for the prevention OF cruelty hand
Poor Clarence-Maud-S that's a photograph OF
you and your handsome cousin Clarence, is itr
You seem 70 be sitting pretty close together.
Mabel (blushing furiouslyl-He hasn't any iert
arm. He lost IL IN the with Spain. I told him
-(Chicago Tribune.