davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
He soRTs0 THEM UT.

Minister Was Satisfied the Knots
Were Safely Tied.
A clergyman who has just returned
from a trip to England tells a story he
heard there of the marriages made on
certain feast days, when no fee is
charged and the young couples come
~ great numbers a long distance to
take advantage of the custom.
The cSstom is not general, but local,
being confined to certain rural places
in the vicinity of Manchester and Old.
ham. Upon one of those occasions, -
tells the clergyman, with a chuckle. "a
delegation of fifty young people from
Oldham and the surrounding country
journeyed to Manchester, making a
picturesque grouping at the Old Eng
fish church of st. Marks Each one
OF the men carried a long staff or stick
as the people there call a cane, and
each Of the young women brandished
an umbrella. the use of which will be
presently seen.
After the ceremony of marrying
the lot was concluded, and the crowd
was going down the church aisle. one
young woman hurried back and inter.
copied the rector as he was going to
the vestry.
I theenk, meenster,' she painted
that you have morried me to the
wrong felly.'
Don't let that worry you" said the
rector, VINO was in a hurry, sort your.
selves as you go out, you're all mar
ried fast enough" and acting on his
advice, they sorted out the right pairs
'On their way back to Oldham they
bought the things necessary to light
housekeeping, stringing the lighter
utensils on the sticks and umbrellas
poised on their shoulders. Chicago
Record Herald.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
An IneorrlnihIe Doc.

The intelligence of the dog suffered
somewhat by an Athens narrative in
which it is made to appear that an old
dog owned by F. Holcomb recently
engaged with a rattler on the low
grounds near the town, and was Sc
verely bitten. Mr.. Holcomb was ia
miliar with the formula for snake
bites. He had some of the medicine
on hand, consisting of whisky and
quinine mixed in quantities to suit.
Opening the dogs jaws he turned a
liberal dose down him. Two or three
days elapsed during which the animal
was unable to walk straight, yet he
seemed not to have any pain, and in
fact appeared to enjoy himself. But
at last he was sober again. One would
naturally think that having been bit
ten once he would have fought shy
OF the swamp afterward, but the mo-
ment he was able to navigate he was
back among the boys again watching
for more snakes. This is why he
seems elligent.-Detroit (Mich.)
Tribune
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
Like the Docs.

Mrs. Frederick B. Schoff, the presi-
dent of the National Congress of
Mothers, dwelt forcibly in a recent
address upon the evil of loquaGity.
"Loquacity - talking overmuch,"
she said, that is a fault inherent in
too many mothers, and in too many
fathers, too, if you come to that ST.
lence is a blessed thing and we should
cultivate it when we have nothing to
say. Silence is always better, to my
mind, than buzz of empty and
meaningless talk. l used to know an
old lady who talked overmuch. She
was out walking one August after
noon when a man passed her with a
dog. The dogs tongue hung out a
little and the old lady stopped and
said: That dog is not safe. 1t should
not be at large. Its tongue hanging
out of its mouth is a sure sign of
rabies
The old man, who knew the med
dlesome old lady well, retorted: It's
only a sign that the dogs tongue is
too big for its mouth, the same as
some old folks Los Angeles
Times.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08

like me to go to bed; co good nag
Come over in the morning ard lll p.
you a bunch Of tulips 10 take IT,,
home. Well good night"
Good night" / said, and left h-
It was a cold, bitter morning ta
ter. l paused at the gate on my
to the Office and looked acros
street at the frost starred window =
the old mans house and at the su.o
less chimney He was in the haDi.
rising early, and stepped over t. Sc
If anything was the matter. Thor
was no response to my rap, so turns
the knob and pushed open the door J.
pervasive feeling of cold was in rs
air. A pile of pine shavings lay +.
readiness on the hearth
went over to the bed, standing r.
the corner by the stove. ana ther-
with one big hand thrown out or
the thick, red comforter. and the BIZ
lips slightly parted, lay the old MAJ
He had gone TO wait for Kitty,
meet her, perhaps-who knows?
That day / visited the undertake,
and searched the city greenhouse Ecl
lis fayorite flowers At last / foea
some white ones, and the next after
noon we laid him away TO rest. VIII
a tulip on his breast
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08


was old Ben. He had worked on the
place as long as l could remember.
met him now on the threshold.
Hello, Jim, hello, says he; back
at last-why, hello. hello. A welcome
to We.
Welcome? Welcome, with no Kit.
ty; no sweetheart to claim my own;
no trace of the old times, nothing,
nothing-only an old man?
I'VE sat down on the doorstep and
he told me all about it-about Kitty,
hey troubles with Joe Morgans and
how she finally had to marry him.
Her father and mother were both
dead.
only Kitty left-only Ben to take
care OF the place. No wonder my head
went around. | couldn't listen. l had
to 90 away. I was nearly crazy
crazy to see Kitty.
Il struck off over the green fields;
went over the rail fence at a leap,
pushed through the milk-weed and
wild gooseberry bushes. There stood
the house! A window was open and l
could look through it into the kitchen.
leaned against a big cherry tree and
looked. There she sat at the supper
table-the same white face-the same
dark eyes-the same Kitty had
worked and grubbed for through four
long years.
Joe Morgans sat at the head of the
table But | didn't look at him-my
eyes were on Kitty.
well, | couldn't stay there-there
was no use. Kitty lookes contented;
maybe she was. l waited till l saw
her get up from the table and brush
the crumbs from her lap, then | crept
away and walked all night.
after that my money went: |
spent it,; l gave it away-wasted it.
Why. had lots of it. Why not? But
1 lived longer than l expected, and the
money went sooner than expected.
drifted here and there, but when |
came to this spot settled down, and
I've made up my mind to die here
with my tulips. They make me think
of her-Kitty in the old days, before
ANYTHING happened, you know-Kitty
with her white apron and white sun
bonnet-Kitty kneeling among her
flowers. or leaning her little head ca
nv big shoulder, saying she'd nevsr
like anybody but me.
The old mans chin sank on h's
breast, and he was silent for soTe
time. The shadows of night had faiN
en-. Lights were twinkling in thu
windows.
1T is a sad story" said.
sad? Oh, yes. | suppose he ~
plied. rousing himself. But I'm 'keey-
ing you here listening, my man. It's
growing late-time for an old man
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08

mile. So | walked. l say walked, but
1t was more like run. / shaded my
eyes at the head OF the lane and
looked down, thinking I might see her
outside, somewhere-feeding the
chickens, maybe, or sitting on the
stoop. But ! saw nothing of her.
To the left in the barnyard an old
man was milking a little black COW. /
passed on up the path to the front
door. l knocked; but everything was
quiet. The place where the tulips
grew was wilderness of weeds.
Kitty! Kitty l called; Kitty, my
girl, where are you? l opened the
door and went in 1t was only a bare,
smoke scented room, with a table in
the center, covered with dirty dishes
and newspapers.
THE old man came up the path
with pail of milk in his hand. 1t
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
THE TULTP MA NJ
BY MINERVA VI. LINDEN.
Copytqdtsd 1908. By The AUTHORS PiblsRinq comnany

He Tes tall, gaunt, white haired
old mFu of seventy or more. He lived
alone -jast across the street, in an
old fashioned frame building, covered
with fires and creepers. In front was
little plot 1T narrow strip of
grouDd where lilies of the valley
grew is summer Behind was a long
garden filled in spring with rows and
rows Il blazing tulips.
sav him first working with a little
hoe among the bulbs with their long
grern leaves. After that l saw him
often. / wosld stop for a few moments
on M way home in the evening and
watca him while he went up and down
the lDng rows.
Ee asked me to come in, one even
ing end lock at his tulips. went; he
showed me- the different varieties
stepping Smong them with infinite
care. Then we sat down on a little
bench outside of the back door, where
hop vines climbed up the side Of the
house, and he began the story of his
life. What prompted him to tell it
hdN NY unhlu5 II ne never lIleu u
grow any flowers except tulips.
Try, my man" he said, absently,
then was silent for a while. A far
away look came into the faded eyes.
He took his pipe from his mouth and
knocked the ashes to the ground.
You've never heard then? thought
everybody knew about my Kitty -
Kitty and her tulips.
1T happened years ago-ah. me, so
long ago; but it's as fresh to me as
ever-my Kitty's simple white face
and dark, pansy eyes" His coat
sleeve went across his eyes as if wip-
ing away tear.
When | think of that morning
when left her to go away out west, l
can always see the tulips, too They
we're something like these, only-ah!
such blood-red ones and such white
ones, so pure and delicate. Kitty
with her white apron and white linen
sun-bonnet, always reminded me Of
the white ones,
She lived out in the country. The
house stood back from the road and
you had to go down a long lane past
the sheep pasture and the apple or.
chard to find it. | went to see her
every day. She was all the world to
me. | loved her-loved her with all
my heart and we were to be married
when came Blackjack from the
west, with my pockets full of money
bent down and kissed her and said
Well, good bye. Kitty-good bye, my
girl. Keep a light heart till come
back. Good bye
But she pat her head on my shout
der and cried, oh, don't go, Jim
don't 60, she kept saying over and
over to the last That was on the
morning before l went away, out
among the tulips, all by ourselves.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
Condemned Murderer's Last wish.

81 should like my relatives to have
photograph of me as they remem-
Der me four years ago; a picture Of
me not in the garb of felon. nor
with my prison number pinned on my
breast, but one that will bear upon it
no association with my terrible plight.
This is all | ask" Burt Ross. con-
demned to die for the murder of Dep,
uty Sheriff, William ]. Ward Of San
Diego, made the above request OF
Warden Tompkins. 1t is the first
tilae in the annals of San Quentin
prison that a condemned man has
mfde such a request. 1t was granted
by the warden, and photograph of
the murderer in citizens attire. was
taken in the prison gallery, and copies
will be given to Ross relatives after
MA death, in accordance with his last
w'sh.-S0n Frapcis"~ '@~aminer
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
In the oIden Inns

Nebuchadnezzar was eating grass.
Pretty soon the small boy living In
the house next door, where the peo-
pie hadn't any lawn mower. was seen
coming up the walk.
Mrs. Nebuchadnezzar,' he said. with
confidence, my father sent me over
to see if you would lend him your hus-
band for while to trim UP our front
lawn"
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08

Il thought of her always, | wrote
to her every mail for more than TWO
years, but then | stopped writing, for
there had come no answers to my let
ters for a long, long time-nearly a
year. thought something had hap
pened to my letters-that they never
reached her. 1t was such an out OF
the way sort of place, where | was.
But there was money there if l would
only stick to it, and | did for two
years longer. and then | went home
home to my Kitty that | knew was
waiting for me.
The little station was only short
way from the house-about hair u
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
considerate Fellow.

Bi1l-oh. yes. he's great on Ell
quette.
Jill-Is that right?
-Surel Why, he was telling me only
yesterday that if a man is smoking
while walking down the street with
lady, the cigar should always be in
the side Of the mouth farthest re-
moved from the LADY,"
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
The Usual Way.

Nodd-Awfully sorry to hear your
house burned down. Did you save
anything?
Todd-Oh, yes. After some very
lively work we succeeded in getting
out all the things we didn't want
Town and Country.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
A Measure of Time.

They had been engaged only few
lays, so the sensations were still COM
paratively new.
Cant you stay little longer?" she
pleaded, as he gave indications of prep
arations to leave.
well, perhaps very little longer,
ae said
How long?" she asked.
About ten kisses" he replied.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
Proper Classification.

Here's a joke" said the would-be
humorist, about plumber who was
so conscientious that he never over
charged
"Huh!" rejoined the editor. that's
not a joke. We can use it in the tic-
ton, department, however"
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
Not to Be Blamed.

He-"A self-made man is common
enough; but we never hear of a self
made woman"
Considering the kind of ar
ticle the men who are in the self-mak-
ing business turn out, you can hardly
blame the women for not taking it
up"
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
Where Three s ! CROWD.

Toni suppose you spent a pleas
ant evening with your best girl.
Diek-Pleasant? Huhl a fellow
can't make love to his girl in a crowd.
Tom-Oh, was there a crowd there?
Dick-Yes. and the chump didn't
have sense enough to realize that he
wasn't wanted.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08

Mrs. Newed-Tm afraid my husband
has ceased to love me.
Mrs. Homer-What change do you
find.
Mrs. Newed-None; that's just the
trouble. He has quit leaving any in
his pockets.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
Partlculars Not Known.

An auctioneer, putting up an an
tique Roman helmet Cor sale, told the
company he was informed that it had
belonged to Romulus, the Roman
founder; but whether he was an iron
or brass founder he could not tell.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
Easy.

In the temporary absence Of the
beauty editor this question was hand
ed by mistake to the sporting editor;
How shall one get rid of superhu-
Gus hair on the upper lip?"
That's easy, he wrote in reply,
Push the young man away"
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08

Eyes, judge" said the man who was
in the dock, Il did rush the growler a
good deal, but had to do it.
"Why?" asked the judge.
Because my wife boiled the water
and ! just had to get something that
tasted wet"
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
Dinner Bel for the Calf.

Little Joe was visiting in the eoun-
try, and tie ringing of bell to call
the farm hands to dinner interested
him very much. One day he noticed
a COW with a bell on, and asked:
"Gwanpa, does re ole COW wing Eat
bell when re calfe's dinner is weady?"
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08

Think of woman with her social
responsibilities having a childi"
"Disgraceful! But they say she's
fond of it,
That's the strange part. She is al
most like a mother to it."-Town Top
les.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
one MAN, Vision.

Kerwin Injecting a friend)-Say,
I've got the greatest money making
scheme on earth, end it only requires
a few hundred dollars to
Parker-Excuse me. Kerwin, but
I've got to hurry or I'll miss my train.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
One of the Thinos He Saw.

This" said the lecturer, 'is a pic
ture of the ipsicus masidonian Their
momonoclytus, an animal that has
been extinct for over 1000 years"
You're wrong there" said a man
at the end of the room; there's two
o thin with livery bottle Of Casey's
whisky. "-Columbia Jester.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
How 1t Happened.

Myer-"Is there any truth in tbs re
port that your partner assaulte& you
yesterday morning?"
Gyer-"Well. he did beat me uD."
Myer-"How did it happen?"
Gyer-'Well. you see, / choae To
walk up five flights of stairs o ou-
office and he patrcnized the elTEator
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
A Misfortune

He had been telling the thrilling
story Of his escape.
So the automobile got beyond con
trol?" she remarked.
''Ya-as," he replied.
And was wrecked?"
"Ya-as."
But you escaped injury?"
"Oh, ya-as.'
Seems too bad, doesn't it?"
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
The Acme Of c!evernesa.

20, yes. she's awfully clever"
But she never had any early ad-
vantages."
mo, but she's so clever that she
makes a lack of early advantages seem
highly creditable. Cleveland Plain
Dealer.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
Not Allowed.

"And so you have really fallen in
love" they said to the girl whose en-
gagement had just been announced.
"Oh dear, no, she replied. MY so
cial position won't permit of any such
frivolity as that"
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
Financial Maaic.

"I've got my eye on a girl who has
a million dollars in her own name"
'WelI?"
well, l was wondering if I should
get her to change her name if any
Of her change would be in my name. :"
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
Whv He Won.

Goodson-It was Lawyer Townsmun
that won my lawsuit for me.
Simply-Why, | thought he was on
the opposing side.
Goodson-He was.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
OF Course Not

Marriage, remarked the moralizer.
lis a lottery"
Yes, " rejoined the demoralizer.
but it's one of the games of chance
that clergymen do not try to discour.
age"
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
An Even Break.

Her-Ah, me! We have been mar
ried only one short year and I'm
afraid your love has grown cold
already.
Him-Well, it isn't any colder than
your coffee. anyway.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
Cake Was suffclent.

Wife-@John. is there any poisos in
the house2"
Husband-"Yes; but why do you
aslz?"
Wife-'T want to sprinkle some on
this piece of angel cake and gut it
where the mice viii get it. Wouldn't
that kill them?
Husband-"Sure; but it fsn's neces-
sary to waste the poison. - chicago
News.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
A Natural Wonder.

Observation-Disclosures instance OF
the magical power of water. that.
Sparticus-To what do you refer?
Smarticus-I threw a spool in the
water and it came up a-bobbin'.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
Hard in the Museum.

Doesn't it make you vain to be so
stuck-up?" asked the bearded lady.
Not on your whiskers," replied the
human pincushion.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
Celestial earb.

Female Spirit-Have l got to wear
that robe?
St Peter-That or nothing.-Town
Topics.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
Usual Haste.

Ernie-Is the play most over, dearf
Ida-I guess there are two more
acts. The people in the boxes are be-
ginning to put on their coats and hats.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
similar but plferent.

Kerwin-why is it called a football
game?
Parker-I don't know, unless it's be-
cause of the kicking.
Kerwin-But there's just as much
kicking done in a baseball game.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
Asked and Answered.

Little Willie-Say, pa. how does an
army scour the country?
Pa-With brushes. my son.
Little Willie-With brushes,
Pa--Yes. brushes with the enc M,
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
unanlmouslv correct.

Teacher-what part of speech is
''kiss?"
Entire Chorus Of Girls-A conjunc-
ton.
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
The Original Source.

The Original Source.
I see that shorthand writing was
known to the early Egyptians
We'll, I'll bet they got it from the
Chinese laundry bills"
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
Unfinished Job.

Puffem-"Sir, I'd have you knos
that l am a self-made man."
Blu1em-"Se lf-begun, perhaps; bat
Eou we're evidently interrupted"
The silver messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1890-1912, 1904-03-08
LINES TO TIE LIVER

Let poets rave. as poets will
About the heart ana soul
And IN some high toned sonnet sim
Iheir lofty worth extol
!. who must walk in humble wave
And modest muses. WOO
! write this simple song 10 praise
The liver good and true
W ~ heart or soul 10 mortal man.
WHAT'S anything, alack!
To us poor bilious creatures who,
The liver's out Of wback9
While sentiment I take IL. ia
All we'll enough and nice.
q Wn.n we come right down to biz. &"
Tho liver cuts the ice.
So. don't you to the spoopev barda'
SOFT sentiment succurnb
ZOE he who highest truth regards
WIN keep his liver plumb
He knows that heart and soul may bIess
mortal. In "a way.
BIT Oh; fhcy're both "N G. unless
Your livers all 30. X"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1904-01-25

United states ranks lowest Ia the list OF
great nations. with per capita con
sumption Of 1.s7 gallons. According to
this statement. the most abstemious
countries are Canada, Finland and Nor
way. The consumption Of alcohol in
France IN the last ten years has increased
in alarming proportions. while in Eng
land and in the United States there has
been a steady decrease. and 10 this fact
foreign observers attribute in part the
increasing commercial supremacy OF the
United States"
There is temperance lesson so
strong that the moot casual observer
cannot fail 10 understand it. The So
berest nation Is the nation that gets
ahead in the worlds trade, just as the
soberest individual is the individual
who outstrips his fellows in the race
for wealth and distinction. More and
more the use OF intoxicants IS being
recognized as bar to progress in ek-
cry profession, every business.
Time was when drunkenness was
looked upon rather as a foibIe than as
a crime Today no man who gets
drunk even occasionally can hold his
position for very long time. There
are too many other bright men looking
FOR chances, and getting them, too.
when the drinking men fall by the way
side. sobriety is no longer recognized
as 2 particular virtue. It is q, mere
matter of course.