New-York tribune., 1904-10-23
RESTEUL


RESTFUL
The graveyard takes back row seat
As does the barren desert plain;
For calm and quiet they are beat
-(Cincinnati Commercial Tribune.
The librarian Of the Chamber Of Deputies at
Berlin. being told the average time for getting
a book at the Columbia University Library in New
York. exclaimed Where shall go next? Two
hours and half In Berlin. hour in Parts.
twenty minutes in the British Museum and two and
a half minutes at Columbia" Perhaps il he wishes
TO read several books it might time foE him to
make a trip to America
SHE WAS SIMPLY GRa
She was built like large hguro g.
And of course she bemoaned her fs;
She's training each day
In an effort 70 reduce her VS.,
-(Chicago News.
correspondent sends to This London Public
Opinion" the following quaint epltaph on what is
known as 'Thetcher's Stone Winchester. Eng
land. "In Memory OF Thomas Thetcher Grena-
dier in the North Regt. Of Hants Militia. who died
Of violent Fever contracted by drinking Small Beer
when hot the 18th of May. 1894 AEed % Years. In
grateful remembrance OF whose universal good will
towards his Comrades this Stone IS placed here at
their expense. small testimony OF their regard
and concern.
Here sleeps in peace a Hampshire Grenadier
Who caught his death by drinking cold small beer
Soldiers be wise from his untimsly fall
And when you're hot drink Strong at all
An honest soldier never is forgot
Whether he die ty Musket by Pot
"On very hot day recently two 'cullud gemmen'
eTa Snatn6 oT5sGs ms my e %5nRoT Saia Aexander
bright ulatto the other blacker than stove polish
" How 20 feel, Abe% asked the mulatto
:" Kind @ warm. Jake answered the darker
y Right peart thank yo'' said the mulatto to his
9bOny hued FRIEND but say Abe, yo' shore do hold
go color fust rate dis hot weather" ''-(Argonaut
There are dve Popes IN the world. each claiming
universal authority, and with such contempt for
competitors that they will not even notice them.
First, there IS the Pope of the Latin Catholic
Church, at Rome: next. the Pope Nicholas Car OF
Russia: then the Father OF the Faithful ruling at
Constantnople, and the Dalai Lama. who lately ran
away from Lhasa. leaving his hve hundred mill
ion subjects temporarily without a religious head
Finally. there is the Mahometan Pope. who rules
in Morocco. They all tolerably hard up at
present, or claim to he. hut that is no new thing
in their historical development The wonder about
their finances is that in this of the world with
It's prize systems Of bookkeeping and its expecta-
ton of some sort OF return from all investments
anybody can be found TO contribute to them
THE NoRsK NIGHTINGALE
Ay s'posc yu know bout Lucy Gray
And III having 1 qvits t,'S sude time all day
Beside her fader's dOor
DIS AIaester Wordsworth write It down
How Lucy start 10 walk to town
In guide big drifts OF snow.
Lucy" her fader say, "yust tab
Dis lantern from the Shelf
Say Lucy; "AY have kick To max
Wy don't yu SO yureseifr
Bat ,5 Lgsy.s Dad dad Snta amt stand ia d Nc talk
So Lucy Gray tax little walk
To town in dis har snow.
And ant come back next day,
And den her parents get guide fright
"OuT kid ban lost" deY say.
Dey look for tracks vich Lucy max.
And md some tracks dat so
Up TO bridge little lax
And den ban lost in snow
And SO dey tenk Miss Gray ban lost
AND feeling purity bum
The funeral saXty dollars cost,
And all the neighbors como
But Lucy ant ban lost at all
She met a travelling man.
lie ban hird-his name ban Hall.
And OF FOR town dey ran
And Maester Hall and Lucy Gray
Ban married in st. 70.
And dey ban keeping house to-day
milwaukee Sentinel
Senator Daniel OF Virginia. tells OF an old darky
who held 10 the theory that the Lord helps them
who help themselves" in the matter OF prayers.
When asked his experience, old Nose said; We'll.
sab, some pFa'rs is ansud, an some aln't-it ue-
pends on what yo' for. Just arter de wah
wen Il was mighty hard stratchn' for do cullUd
brederin. noticed dat whenebber pray de Lord
TO SEN one o Marse Jenkins's fat chickens 70 de
old man dere no notice took Of de petlshun;
but when pray dat he would sen de old man TO-
de chicken de matter was tended to hefo sunup
de next mornin'"'
Not In the Union Bill-Did YOU hear tho trouble
doMn do,A,I At the new skyhigh Building:
Why the boss went into the building and riveted
ms eyes on me floor. and all the other Tlveters
went on StFlhe! '-(XonkeTs Statesman