Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1904-01-06
THE THINACRE- SMITH ENGAGEMENT.

The mirror of Fashion."-We are in
formed upon the best authority that a
marriage has been arranged between the
Hon. Robert Thinacre, eldest son of the
Earl of Thinacre, and Miss Ella Smith,
only daughter of John Smith, Esq, Of
Oilopolis, U. S.
The Club Smoking Room. Heard the
news, you fellows? Bob Thinacre's en-
gagged to Miss Ella Smith. What Smith 2
Why, old Oilcake Smiths daughter, OF
course. viii [ take my oath to it? My
dear boy, I'll go one better. I'll bet you
flyer on it. Waiter, a brandy and soda,
sharp. 'Surprised?'. (The speaker shrugs
his shoulders.) Why on earth should l
be? What else dc you think penniless
heirs to titles and American heiresses
exist for? Order of nature, my dear boy,
order of nature. Wish / were heir to an
earldom, that's ALL"
The Hon. Tom Martin: Poor old Bob !!
[ suppose | must write and congratulate
him; but it's deuced hard lines. If it
hadn't been for those Internal mortgages
he might have picked and chosen among
a dozen nice English girls. | suppose
he was bound to sacrifice himself; but.
hang it all, one can't help feeling sorry
for himi"
Harry Hard-What! Cid Bob gone |!
The best halfback we've had for years.
That's the third this season: the club
will have to break up if our fellows 60 On
like this. It's heartrending! I've a good
mind to resign the secretaryship. (Reads
note AGAIN. $50 you must no longer
consider me a regular member of the
team, though [ shall hope to assist you
occasionally" Umph! That's what they
all say. Fancy fellow like Bob, who
might have gained his international cup,
tied to woman's apron string. (Puffs
at his pipe. saygely.) Poor old Bob;
suppose he had to!
The Marker-So l card. so | card.
Ah! it's pity, that it is. As promising
a young player as ever come into these
rooms. screws in off the red) Ell
be great loss to us-for a time. But
they all come back arter year or two,
sir. Makes a long pot) They do say
she's heiress, sir! (NNinks at the red
and starts a spot break
The Hon. the Earl of Thinacre-Er-
yes-I -er-felt compelled to sane
ton the engagement. Not exactly
WeIl-er-no! But there were-er-cir-
cumstances- A mighty respectable
family; and, the er-young lady not-e1
vulgar or unprepossessing. 1t might
have been worse!
Oilcake Smith-So poor little Ellie's
got her lord Well. well, her ma was
set on it; but the child always said she
wouldn't. Fingers his check book abb
sently.) Some wooden headed young ass,
suppose. Why the deuce couldn't she
marry a man who'd work for her, and
keep her? Ellie's a good little girl, if
they'u let her alone Eli! what? Meet
ing i'll five minutes" (Scrawls telegram
"News received. Satisfied if you and
Ellie are Tell Ellie to draw on me for
anything she likes" It's all | can do for
her!
Lady Thinacre-Yes; it's all settled.
(Sighs.j Of course, one wouldn't have
wished-but with rents still falling. Now
we shall have to receive them, | suppose.
(Sighs again.) "Vulgar?" NV dear
Emily, what else can one expect :?
Thought her rather refned?' Oh, /
don't complain of her, my dear, but the
mother! Lifts her hands in horror
Poor Bob takes it wonderfully well. But
the dear fellow would be sure to bear up
before fis mother.
the gals settled at last: Such a bother
as I've had with her, you wouldn't be-
lieve; indeed, for a long time / thought
She would marry some common person
or other. Not quite what you would
have expected?' We'll, no, Maria; it isn't
all that should have wished. With our
position, Ellie was entitled to duke, |
say. But the child was that obstinate;
&r,I hoy, Ill
and she didn't seem SO set against him,
was glad enough to get it settled. Lor',
we all have our fancies and feelin's, us
poor women. Now, with men it's diff
ferent. There's Smith wouldn't care if
Ellie wanted to marry a dustman, [ don't
believe. (Left ta,...ing)
. The Hon. Maud Thinacre: ePoor. poor
old Bob Oh, I am SO sorry for him!
It's just like Bob to sacrifice himself for
the rest of us, and pretend that he rather
likes it; but | don't know how he could
do it, with all his romantic notions about
love, and such things. (Sighs.) He used
to say he would e,nigrate first. Size
doesn't seem such a bad little thing. l
think ! must make friends with her. ami
see if | can get her to like him. Besides,
if [ make a fuss over her, Bob might
CiiHh lHole VI Hel. ana even grow iona
OF her--she really is rather pretty
His View: "My dear Tom, you'll have
seen from the COMPOUNDED papers that
I'm engaged to Ella Smith, the American
'heiress. All the fellows call me a lucky
dog. and grin till I'd like to punch their
heads; and the people at home look at
me with moist eyes, till they drive me
nearly mad.
If were to tell them the truth about
the matter they'd probably want to put
me in an asylum. | must tell some one,
so I'm writing to you. Don't rot nue., old
man; l'm III love with the GIRL
i daresay you thought, when you
read the news out at Glib, that she was
the usual sort Of American heiress-big,
snowy girl, with q beastly twang in her
voice. Well, she isn't. She quiet, al
most shy, little thing. with fair hair, and
big, innocent eyes. Honest Iniun, Tom.
thought she was in love with me when
| proposed. She just quivered. and put
her head down softly on my arm, like
any girl n,ight-and-yo know what I