davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
La Junta tribune., 1904-06-08

woman, though pill may have
suggested it. Sweethearts are
dreams because they seldom come
true; wives because they're often
a night mare, and both because
they 60 by contraries.
Economy-Denying ourselves a
necessary to day in order to buy a
luxury Tomorrow.
Fame-Having a brand OF cigars
named after you.
Football-A clever substitute for
carrying on prize fights under the
guise Of a reputable game.
Lie-A very poor substitute for
the truth, but the only one dis
covered up to date.
Library - From French libre,
meaning free, and proper name
Andy. Something free from Andy
Carnegie.
Lo5ster-The edible lobster is
found off the New England coast.
The i~o-legged species is found
everywhere. All kinds are green,
but when roasted turn a bright red.
Soubrettes are very dependent on
both varieties for living; together
they furnish her with food, raj
ment, flats, diamonds, and occa-
sionally indigestion.
Matrimony- A game for woman,
in which the unmarried half are
trying to find a husband and the
married half trying not to be found
out by one. Both halves are emf
nently successful.
Passenger-One who does not
travel on a pass (Antonym fos
Deadhesd From English pass,
to 20, and Greek endidomi, to give
up. One who has to give up to
60.
Platonic Love-An arrangement
in which a man and . woman
atte m pt q correct imitation Of .
pAir of icscles-and never succeed
Pearl-A small round product
manufactured by an oyster. bought
by . lobster and worn by buftes-
hy-
Neutrality-suspicious. who re-
tusns TO the people publicly .
sm Ill percentage of the wealth he
steals from them privately
Ssoc -WomAns only saw
80 fos A Rainy Day
UaSon-An siIing n iividuaI
La Junta tribune., 1904-06-08
The "Fee''sh oies'e"s'y."

The best rec ommendation OF
"rbe Foolish Dictionary, by Glide
on Wurdz (evidently an slias), is
Offering few sample definitions
from that curious work. IL is
published in Boston by the Rob
inson Luce Company, who own
the copyright and deserve con
gratulations. The author dedi-
Gates the new work to his dog,
but fails to mention the name OF
the dog MIR Wurdz describes
himself as master of Pholly,
Doctor of Loquacions Lunacy.
Fellow OF the Royal Gibe Society"
AdvIce-A commodity p.ddled
bv your lawyer and given away bv
your mother-ia-law,b but impossible
to dispose Of Yourself Famous
as the one thing which it is "More
blessed to give than receive"
Absinth--From two Latin
wor Is, ad ami sinistrum, meaning
ITO the bad II il doubt, try
on, (Oid adsge. "Absintbe makes
the jig last longer
Money, born of poor.
but dishonest parents, and taken
in by the Graft family.
Biliousn-ss-A liver complaint
often mistaken for riety.
Brass Banda clever though
soabe~ hat compiicate arrange
m-nt for holding a crowd together.
Compliment - From English
eon,-hot arr. and Latin pleo, to
Gil Hence, to flll With hot air.
Cemefery-The one place where
princes and psupefs. porters and
presidents are finally on the dead
level.
Champagne-Th- stuff that
makes the world 60 round.
Chump-Any one whose opinion
diff-rs radically from ours
ColIector-A man whom few
care TO see but many ask to call
again
Democracv-Am mysterious coun
tsy. bounded on the east by Rich
AID Olney. on the vest by Willie
Brsan. on the north bv Dave Hll
snd on the south by Bennie Pitch
fork TiiImsn
Dream-whst . man may csH z
La Junta tribune., 1904-06-08
se.sss 4.eee Need Of Cattle.

Col. James A. Lockhart returned
Wednesday morning from Texas.
where he has bought 1000 head
Of two year old steers. These
steers will he taken to the Gen.
Palmer ranch, near Walsenburg
and Veta Pass, and turned into a
pasture containing $4,000 acres
Ii is part Of an old Spanish land
grant and has an abundance OF
grass and pure wates- These ca,
tie will be kept there fos two years.
when they will be brought to Col.
Lockhart's feed yards near this
CITY and finished for the market.
The colonel will return to Texas
in . few davs to attend 20 the NOV
ing Of hrs big bunch OF cattle to
the psssuse- ROCKY Ford Gazette
La Junta tribune., 1904-06-08
Ssnts Fe Excursion Rates.

Canon City and return, account
G. A. X. reunion, June 18th and
I4th, limit June 18TH, rate s.. 90.
Colorado Springs and return,
account race meeting, une roth,
nth and 18Th, limit June 18TH,
rate s.. IS.
Chicago and return. special
summer excursions, une Ist 10
September goth, limit October
3Ist, one way via ST. Louis, II
desired, rate $500.
La Junta tribune., 1904-06-08
1tSessas Tor Ss,s.

PlacaTds are ior saie at the
TRIBUNE office, at the rate OF hve
cents each. which read as follows ::
For Sale.
Lodging.
For Rent.
Boarding.
No Credit.
No Smoking.
Dressmaking.
No Admittance.
Don't Spit on the Floor.
Boarding by Day OF Week.
Cigarette Smoking Not Allowed.
La Junta tribune., 1904-06-08

frequently troubled by scab and
liable to strike without warning.
Wedding-A trade in which tie
BRIDE is generally given away and
the groom is often sold.
La Junta tribune., 1904-06-08

1.-The Pike" CARRIER is making
personal observations of labor and
social conditions enroute, and will
write a book on completing his
Journey at New York some time in
November.
La Junta tribune., 1904-06-08
SoME MORE LOCAL tTEMS.
Traie with II. g. Todd.

J. w. FISHER S bookstore.
Henry Lance, OF Rocky Ford,
was county seat visitor Monday.
! Dr. S. w. Billingslea; rooms IS
and 20 Simonton block; phone
Io4I black.
Mayhem House Furnishing Co.,
undertaking, embalming. Phone,
+42 black; night phone. 462 red.
Gem" flour, best IN the market.
Every sack guaranteed or money
refunded.-La Junta Milling Co
St. Louis and return, account
Worlds Fair. season tickets,
S3s. 90; sixty day ticket, s32.I5;
fifteen day tickets, S28.os.
For hrst-class papeTing and
painting call on A. c. Barr. We
employ only first class workmen
and our prices are reasonable.
Week end excursions, good going
Saturday or Sunday, returning
Sunday or Monday, Colorado
Springs. s.. IS; Summit of Pixies
Peak, 1915; Palmer Lake, IS. 20.
Or Iune nth and 25th the
Santa Fe will sell special coach
excursion tickets to ST. Louis and
return, and Kansas City and re
turn at rate Ct sI7.I5. Good re-
turning within fifteen days.
Mrs. Ed Harney and children
arrived last Sunday morning on
No. S from Oklahoma City, and
will locate permanently in La
| Junta. Mrs. Harvey is a sister OF
Mary A. and Thomas Roberts OF
this city.
ID. Sulier has been appointed
master mechanic for the New
Mexico division, with headquarters
at Ration to succeed II. A. Harrity,
who will be transferred to Albu-
guergue. The change will be
made some day this week. Ration
Range.
&. Forbes. late OF the firm OF
Sherman d Forbes, leaves to-moT
row Tor Independence, Kan. where
he expects to locate and engage
in business. The best wishes Of
host OF La Jnnta friends will
attend Jack on his prospecting
tour 10 fields green and pastures
new.
The canning factory east OF
town is to be torn down some time
during the present month, and will
be Tcmodelled and rebuilt. The
I size of the new structure will be
32x64 feet, and is to be equipped
with a new packer, gas plant and
other up to date machinery. The
prospects are favorable for good
season this year.
| The alarm of FIRE last Saturday
night about 10 o'clock, while the
"confetti war" was al its height,
! caused a suspension OF hostilities
for a biief season. The private
car of Frank Griffin, boss painter
of the western division of the Santa
Fe, was ignited by sparks from an
engine and caused furious blaze
for a few minutes. The car was
damaged to the extent SIoo, and
about SIoo worth OF material was
destroyed.
Frank Gillen, who has been
working in the Santa Fe machine
shops at Arkansas City for a year
or more, and went out with the
strikers, left last week for Texas
in search OF employment. Frank
had his arrangements all completed
to join the benedicts, but has con
cluded to defer that pleasure until
the world looks brighter The
best laid plans Of many man,
went gang after gee, when the
strike came up on the Santa Fe-
with apologies to Mr.. Burns.
The hearing on the motion oi
the Atchison, Topeka & Santa Fe
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1904-09-28

chairman Of that party and also cause
susl returns to be delivered to the
county clerk. If September primary,
or TO the chairman OF the city com
nittee and city clerk il a city primary,
provided always that such returns
shall be sent by registered mail where
practica he.
2. The county canvass Of the returns
Of the sept .mber primary shall be
made b. the same officers and a. the
mann r provided in chapter ). statutes
OF 1898. for the canvass of the returns
OF a November election. The canvass
ers shall meet and canvass such returns
ct ten o'clock on the Friday following
the September primary. Their returns
shall contain the whole number OF vOCes
cast for each candidate OF each politi-
cal raTty. ard a duplicate as TO each
political party shall be delivered to
the county chairman Of such party.
3. The c.1nvassers shall also make
an additianal duplicate return In the
same form as provided In subdivision
>. showing the votes cast for each
candidate rot voted for wholly with
in the limits OF the county. The county
clerk shall forthwith send TO he secre-
tary u state by registered mall one
complete cory Of all returns as to
such candidates. and he shall likewise
send 20 the chairman Of the state cen
trail committee OF each party a dupit-
relating TO such candidates OF each
such party.
Section II. The board Of canyassers
provided for by section 80, statutes OK
1888. - canvass returns Of a NOVem-
Der election, shall constitute the state
board Of canvas>ers of September pri-
iuaries, and all the provisions Of Sec
tlon 81 and Sab inclusive OF said stat
utes relating 70 the canvass Of the re-
turn OF a November election. shall
as fa- as applicable, apply TO the can
vass return, and Certification TO the
Such aoar6 shall meet at the office
of the secretary Of state at ten O'Clock
a. m. on this third Tuesday OF Septem-
Der next after the September primary.
PARTY CANDDATES.-Sec Is
I, The person receiving the greatest
number OF votes at a primary as the
candidate OF a patty for sn Office, shall
be the candidate of that party for
such office and his name as such
candidate shall be placed on the official
ballot at the following election.
, AS soon as state canvass or
primary shah be certified 70 him, the
secretary Of state shall publish In the
official state paper q certified statement
OF the result Of such primary as 10 can
6tdates for state officers. United states
senators. and representatives in con-
greSs. and any other candidate whose
district extends beyond the limits OF
= single county. and shall mail 70 the
chairman OF the state central COMMITTEES
OF each party so much OF such certih-
cate as relates 10 his party.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1904-09-28

SECRETARY OF STATE TO GER
TIFY TO COUNTY CLERKS .-Section
49, ] Not less than fourteen days be-
fore any November election the secre-
tary OF state shall certify to the county
clerk of each county within which any
OF the electors may vote for the candi-
dates for such Offices the name and
description Of each person nominated
for any such office as specified in the
nomination papers,
Section 20 The canvass ofthe returns
Of a city primary shall be made by
the mayor, the city clerk. and the
treasurer of such city. any two OF whom
shall constitute a quorum. Such board
of canvassers shall meet at eleven
o'clock in the forenoon OF the day fol-
lowing the city primary and canvass
the vote substantially as provided by
sections So and So, statutes of 1893.
They shall make and certify duplicate
returns a. to the votes cast for the can
didates and forthwith certify and file one
complete return with the city clerk and
deliver so much of the other as relates
to each party to the respective city
chairman.
PARTY COMMITrEES.-sect II.
l. At the September primary each voter
may write IN the space left on his
ticket for that purpose the names OF
not to exceed three qualified electors
OF the precinct for members OF his
PARTY precinct committee. The three
haVir2 the highest number or NoteSsnail
constitute such committee. and the one
having the largest vote shall be chair
mar The official return made by the
inspec ors shall show the names and
address IS of each party committeeman
chosen.
2. Ths party committee of each city
and county and of each assembly dis
trict shat consist Of the party chair
man Of each precinct in such city.
county or distHct; the state senatorial
district committee OF the chairman OF
the Assem- bly, district committees in
such senatorial district: the congress
sfonal committees Of the party chairman
OF the senatorial district committees,
wholly or partially within such con-
grsssIonal district the state central
committee as hereinafter provided.
Each such committee shall choose its
officers BY ballot excepting as herein
provided
8 Each committee and its officers
shall have the powers usually exercised
by such committees. and by the Off
GERS thereof. in so far as is consistent
with this act The various officers ana
committees now in eXistsncs shall ex-
ercise the powers ard perform the
dueies herein prescribed until their sue
cessors are chosen in accordance with
this act At all meetings OF said city.
county and assembly district commit
tees, each precinct Chairman shall have
one vote for every 1fty votes, OF ma
jor fraction thereof cast by his party
in hts precinct at the last general cleo
ilon. each suSh- chairman to Rave 81
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1904-09-28
State Of wisconsin. County OF vernon-ss
Office OF O UNITY CLERK.

State Of Wisconsin. countyo OF vernon-ss
Office OF O UNITY Clerk.
Viroqua, Wisconsin. sepie uber l. 1904
To the Town. City and Village lexis OF YER
ron County, Wisconsin, Greeting:
Notice IL hereby given that at the general
election 20 be held n the several owns.
wards, villages and election dis ricts IF Yer
non county. on Tuesday, succeeding the drst
o., 1904, the following officers are to be voted
"A K GOVERNOR in place Il Robert NJ La
Toilette, whose term of Office Will expire on
the first Monday OF January. A. ID 1865.
A LIEUTENANT GOVERNOR 10 nlsce Of
James . Davidson. whose term OF office " IN
expire on the first Monday In January. a. d +,
A SECRETARY OF STATE, in place 1T
Waiter L. Houser. whose term If office VII
expire OF the first Monday in January, A. d
a STATE TREASURER. In place Of John
Kempf, whose term OF office will exnlIe ON
the fret Monday ~ January. A. D., 1905
AN ATTORNEY GENERAL In piece OF
Lafayetfe NJ. Sturdevant whose term of office
will exnlre on the first Monoay OF January.
A D., 1908.
RAILROAD COMMISSIONER, IN place
Of John w. Thomas. whose term Of Office will
expire on the FIRST Monday in January. D.
A COMMISSIONER OF INSURANCE In
plsce OF Zeuo NJ. host whore term Of rfffce
will exnire on the first Monday Of January.
A. D.. 1905.
A REPRESENTATIVE IN CONGRESS for
the Third Congressional District consisting
If the counties OF Grant, Gre wford. Richard,
Sauk. Juneau. Vernon and Iowa, IN nlace IT
Jcse ph W. Bsbcock whose term of off 70 9TH
expire on the fourth day OF Mar oh, A .. 1908
3 STATE SENATOR In the Twenty
Flghth Senate di-trict, consisting OF the coun-
? "a OF RichlaDd and Vernon, IN Mace Ut
Oliver G MuBson whose term OF office will
expire on the first Monday OF January, A. D.
1919.
A MEMBER OF ASSEMBLY for Vernon
county 10 place OF andrew H Dahl, whose
-. a % office viii expire on the first Monday
OF January, A. d I, 70 5
A County Treasurer for Vernon county In
place OF Simon Tier. whoSe term OF Office
viii expIre on the tirst Monday OF January,
A, d 1875.
County Clerk for Vernon county In
place % J. Marshall. whose term - Office
will expire en- iLa atst Monday OF January.
a u 1905.
A District Attorney for Vernon couniy.t1
mace ~ J. Henry Bennett. whose tern pt
Office will exnire on the FIRST Nc odsy IN Jan1-
airy, a. D.. 1905.
A Sheriff for Vernon ccJuty. IN plzce OF :.
SeverSon. whose tenn OF Office will eyrtre
on the fra Monday OF January. A. D 1905
Resister Of Deeds for Vernon county. In
place Of Thomas o. M0rk- whose term OF
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1904-09-28
TIMBER is lNsxHAusrlgt
British Columbia Trees Are of Gigg
tic Size,

Il
tic Size.
British Columbia. like the northN
ern part of the United States. pIInas
itself on the fact that its hillsides Be;tT
lheNhaustible supplies of timber. The
| figures which are poked at one are
SIMPLY overwhelming. says the Van
! cc@"A correspondent Of the New York
tribune.
Why" said one lumberman. I'VE
can supply the world with wood, and
we are doing it, too. Just look at our
harbor You will lind ships there load
ing with boards and shingles for En-
gland, Australia. China, Japan, .ndia
and South America. Why our trees
grow from 100 to no feet in height
and 3 to feet in diameter. Those are
average ones, mind you. Take a reg
ular British Columbia toothpick. and
you coI:ld build two houses 80 by 80
feet and IL feet high out of one of
them. We have got as high as 100000
feet of lumber from one acre. while
out in Ontario, if you cut 10000 feet
you think you are doing WE'LL
mere 10 AlON Oll IT'S way 10 ' d0-
| couver the trunk of giant fir. 120
feet long and 40 feet i'll circumfer-
ence
We are just going to use it ror ex-
hibition, explained man who was
connected with the company owning
it. Really he went OH sorrowfully.
there isn't any money in such tarna-
ION. Ia, SIT al 4.
handle them"
The building lots of Vancouver are
still sprinkled with the stumps of the
forest monarchs which not long ago
covered its site. SO rapacious were
the demands of commerce. that hand
maiden of civilization that only one
of these remains, outside of Stanley
Park. Even this one is near the en-.
trance to the park The cedars and
frs in the pleasure ground emphasize
the citys loss in the utter destruction
of its big trees. a circumference of
forty feet is not uncommon. One mon
ster is tifty-siX feet around and an
other siXty-six feet, and that six feet
above its base. And your lumbermah
- AOiIu VI hSuIIuS just uON many
bundles of shingles one of these ce-
dars would furnish
Doubtless, however, Stanley Park
trees are safe. for the city takes IL de-
served pride in this beautiful island.
a causeway connects it with the main
land The drive around it. seven miles
in length, shows many beautiful views.
OF course, most of the park is yet un-
touched by the landscape gardener,
and the thickets are dense as Il Cuban
jungle. In the cultivated spots one
sees flowers that bloom with the luxu-
rance of California, for the climate.
in spite of the 500 miles that separate
Vancouver from San Francisco, is sim
liar to that at the Golden Gate.
On every hand one hears of large
investments by United States capital
lists in British Columbia timber lands.
One aggregation of st. Paul interests,
representing $5T, 100000, which oper-
ates in many parts of the States. has
bought billion feet of standing lum-
Der. and there are smaller purchases
without number Representatives of
American firms are traversing all the
wooded country hereabouts. and fur
Their investments on q huge scale are
assured.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1904-09-28

ONCE will exntre on the first aouday Of an.
uary. A. - 1895
A Clerk OF The Circuit court for Vernon
county In place of %. +. Maths W bn p term
nf flee will expire on the fret Monday in
January. A d.. 1903
County Surveyor for Vernon county, In
place of J. Older. " hose term OF effice will
.-xnire on the hrst Monday Of January A D..
1905.
A Coroner for Vernon county In nlece OF
Warren W Dunlap. whose term OF Office viii
exoire on the first Monday OF January, A. b.,
1898.
Votes 20 be counted and returns made d ?.
suant to Law
Given under nay hand st the sfffce OF the
County CLERK. ViroQus, Wisconsin, this first
day Of September. A. D.. 1909
J.. J. MARSHALL.
County Clerk. Vernon County. Wis.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1904-09-28
THEN HE WANTED TO STAY.
Amusing Experience of Gen. Fitzhugh
Lee at a Florida Hotel.

Shortly after the expiration of his
term as Governor of Virginia, General
Fitzhugh Lee decided to rest for few
weeks and seized Palm Beach, Fla,
as the place, eX-President Cleveland
having also selected that place for
few weeks sojourn, says Success.
General Lees emoluments as governor
had not been very large and he was
not seeking an expensive hosiery.
Imagine my surprise and chagrin.
he said, ION arriving late one evening
at Palm Beach and, after registering
at the hotel being escorted with great
attention to a suite with this notice
on the door: The price of these rooms
is 500 per day
1T was too late for me to attempt
to make any change, besides, l was
given to understand that the rooms
were especially prepared for the eX-
Governor of Virginia. One hundred
dollars day. Half that night l tum-
bled and tossed, thinking about the
price of those rooms aud wondering
where was going to get the money.
| finally concluded that the only thing
left for me to do was to quit that no.
tel without loss of time. as it would
certainly be beneath the dignity of all
Ex-Governor of Virginia to ask for any
thing cheaper than the room especially
assigned to him. Accordingly l arose
at an early hour, packed my trunk and
proceeded to the office. | informed
the clerk that l had changed my pro-
gram and was obliged to leave on the
next train, and that wished my bill
at once.
why, governor" exclaimed the
clerk, your sudden departure will
prove a great disappointment, as we
expected you would remain several
weeks
- am sorry. too l said. but 1
must leave on that 10 o'clock train.
Indeed. I was sorry to leave. but there
was that 500 day. which l knew 1
could not pay.
The clerk. however. made no move.
and / r ,terated my request for my
bill
That's all right said the clerk.
Mr.. FIagler left orders. as soon as we
heard that you were coming. that there
was to be no charge as long as you re-
mained with us. whether one dav or
six weeks. We are only sorry that you
can't remain"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1904-09-28

Mrs. Ruth MeEnnery Stuart's new
novel The Rivers Children is to be
illustrated by Harry C. Edwards.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1904-09-28

I certify that the within ballot was
marked by re for an elector Incapable
under the law OF marking his Own bal
lot and as directed bY him
--..-.- eco.
.rr Inspector x Election.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1904-09-28

or .......J, IN the county az q
the offlce) ............. to be voted for
at the primary to be held on tho firss
tuesday OF September, 49,. as repre-
senting the principles of said party.
and I further declare that intend to
support the Candidate named herein.
CIn Cities
street. No
- t-t
''~..'-.'..'.... ,...,.. 49,. ......-..-...--....
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1904-09-28
JoINr RESOLUTION no. II.

Providing for al amendment to section !.
Article VIII, OF ths constitution, relating
70 taxation.
Resolved by the assembly. the senate con-
curing. that section Of article VII OF tue
constitution OF the state OF Wisconsin De
amended by adding at the end thereof the
following sentence: The Legislature may
provide for u q Rduated income tax, so That
wheu SO amenoed said section shall read as
Rsouows: Section l. The rule OF taxation
shall be unifoFm, aud taxes shall be levied
upon such property as the legislature shall
prescribe The legislature may provide TOR a
graduated Income TAX
GlvPA under my hand and cfiicial seal AZ
the Capitol 10 ihe city OF Madison. this Sast
: dBy OF ugust, A u 1924
seal WSLTERL HDCSER,
>ecEetarg u state.