New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1904-12-30
PRORLEM OF THE HOME.

PROBLEM OF IiE HUMP.
Hello We want servant girl
You've got no servants-what?
What's Bsst s. t I5dn on 2oy yes understand
An empoye will suit as we'll;
Yes. black or white vii, do;
No matter what her hue
What's that? green one7 Well. how much
What? -Four per week with room and board'
Well. please don't send her yet.
The last one that We had was greeni
and what she did was small compared
With what she couldn't do.
Our house Is not training school,
That comes aIonG-speak louder. What?
who only wants three afternoons.
AND Who g Won't A Work I upstaiFs Il she has
To do the work below
Well what's the price OF pearls to-day?
What? SIX per week? How nice:
7 didn't think that one could get,
usv Pss5l # s sneh RF's Oh yes
We always so away .
IN ksap night 0n draw iss i pay a'
What's that7 She doesn't r like the street
We never wish do a thing
gFsd ask 4stb her vs What Rsa 5hst
No matter, what the nesi 9l
She won't live in nat!
You've got another? What's she like?
Well, send hex I'D. If she is like
She isn't? Why? They're out of style1
We'll. send her up. Perhaps wen suit.
-Qeslies Magazine,
The Con gress of Naturalsts and Physicians which
recently met at Breslau strongly condemned the
goose STEP which is used in the German and
Austrian armies. One physician says that this
ridiculous manner of marching is TO blame for
the great amount of knee and foot trouble In the
two armies.
Teacher-Johnny write on this blackboard the
sentence. 1.-TWO heads are better than one" Now
Johnny, do you believe that?
in a dime museum and make lots OF money.
youth
The Literary Historical Society OF Quebec viii cele-
brats tomorrow the 10th anniversary OF the attack
upon Quebec by Montgomery and Arnold, on De-
cember 81. 17I5. The society Will commemorate the
event by placing bronze medal, with suitable
inscription. nearly be determined upon
the spot Of the attack. NEWCOMERS, as they pass
historic st. Paurs tomorrow might also stop long
enough. at least TO reread the Inscription on the
memorial tablet which commentaries Montgom-
ery's fame.
REFORM
Time was when there were few more vile than I,
Few Though speak, that deeper plunged IN
Fewthat have had so lamentaby high
A time.
The shocking details of my grim career.
My tastes were Awful. and my moral state
Oh, dear!
To virtuous appeal my heart was shut:
Blithely I swagsered the downward track;
I must have been the hardest sort of nut
To crack
But now-oh. Love. oh. SOVEREIGN power OF Lowell
Della has raised my thoughts TO nobler aims:
have reformed; have soul above
Those games
I hardly ever stay out late at night:
Cards are a thing verv rarely touch,
I seldom snoke-that Is TO say. not quite
go much.
NV tornper though VIGOROUSLY short,
Has lost it's tendency TO run amuck;
! am as one with whom a child could sport
with luck)
Also have acquired the Art of Song
That never dreamed had turn that way,
Tenor. I'll trouble you! And rather strong
On A.
Sometimes I sing and sing for hours on end
Songs all OF Love-and should sing much more
But for the person lwhom once called friend
Next door
Ere had cravings for q higher bliss,
Who would have thought that should carry on
Like this?
And you. o Della pearl of maidenhood.
See my amendmenti Am / not good
Young man?
IT was for you o Della, that turned
This leaf over; It's to you bring
This Offering; for you that have learned
To sing.
I hope have not spent my time IN vain
And when You see how greatly I've improved
Della trust that you VIII not remain
unmoved.
That. when in honeyed accents confess
NY neemly passion: you, with answering glow.
Will. for the sake OF decency. say, Yes.
n