The semi-weekly messenger. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1897-1908, 1904-08-19
HERE n THERE.

As an English tourist was passing
Mark Twain's home near Florence last
winter~one of the humorist.s dogs rush.
ed out OF the gate and barked savage
~ az the stranger. Mr.. Clemens called
the animal back, and was about 10 apol-
ogize Tor n canine guardians strenu-
osity when h Britisher growfed: IF
should kick that brute. don't you know
perhaps he'd stop barking at passers-
by Well maybe he would" drawl-
! ed Mr.. Clemens. He never attempts
TO bark when he has his mouth full Of
meat.|Springfield Republican.
A republican spellbinder is authority
for the statement that "Presiden,
Roosevelt is in a class by himself AS
yet nobody a questioned the truth
OF this observation-disclosures Sentinel.
The Columbia Record tells is tina,
Judge Parker and President Roose-
Welt, the rival candidates for the pre-
idency, are personal friends. 1t is stat
ed that soon after Judge Parker's nom-
NATION Mr.. Roosevelt sem him two
photographs, one a family group con
tanning all his children and Mrs. Roose-
veit. and another or himself alone.
bearing his autograph. Judge Parker
mas these photographs in a conspicuous
place in his home at Rosemount. A
few days ago Judge Parker returned
the presidents compliment by sending
him photographs of himself and his
family, including his grandchildren. The
president and Judge Parker maintained
cordial relations when Mr.. Roosevelt
was governor and entertained each
other socially. Mrs. Roosevelt and
Mrs. Parker also were friendly. The
Citizen hopes these pleasant social re-
latlons viii continue after Mr.. Parker
iS inSfallad in fha White Ln,,.a DAl
Springs Citizen.
why don't you strive to do some
thing that will make posterity CRATE
ful?" What's the use?' asked Senator
Sorghum? "Posterity may be polite
enough to say much obliged, but it will
not be In a position to reciprocate."-
Washington Star.
You are accused Of running the end
on your umbrella in this mans eye. Are
o guilty or not guilty Not guilty.
your honor. The umbrella doesn't be-
long to me."-EXchange.
In some families the mother or chill
dren, sometimes the "old man." SUBJ
scribes for everything that comes alons
organs, lightning rods, subscription
books, pictures, bric-a-brac-anythine
they can pay for on the installment
plan. 1t is a vicious practice. All has
to be paid for some time or other, and
putting it off affords only temporary
relief. Buy only what you actually
need and What you are able to pay for
on the spot.-Exchange.
Iowa has passed a very stringent law
against chicken stealing, ranking it
with burglary to take a FOWL off a roost
in an open coop. This may do for Iowa,
where the colored Brother is scarce.
hlf in FNnTrh " yn1inn u-ar,1I ~ r4-I.
ed as outrageous class legislation.'-
Durham Herald.
Cause and Effect-"What's the mat
ter with Whimsley? He looks conn
pletely broken down." Just back from
his northumberland Free Press.
There's no pleasing him. He object
ed to my calling him "a lady's man."
"Well?" well, called him "a mans
man and his kicking now because that
sounds as if he were a valet."-Phila-
defphia Press.
Carter-'FWas that you wife 1 saw you
with night before last?' Hoswell-"I
don't remember. Let's see, was she
carrying the parcels or was r. Carter
why, o were, of course" Hoswell
H Couldn't have been Mrs. H.:
guess it was a friend. Trans
cript.
Il thank Heaven remarked Senator
Scadds ~virtuously, that / have never
so far forgot myself as to sell out,-''
And he added after a moments pause,
in he interest of historical accuracy:
NO, I've never sold Out-completely
out. I've always had some influence
left that was still worth purchasing!"-
New Orleans Times-DemCcrat.
IBucolic Innocence.-Mr. Crawfoot-
I'm glad to lear that Zeke is settling
down on something at last. He says
he's up in town spending every dollar
on gardens" Mrs. Crawfoot-"Did he
say what kind of gardens, HIP" MI.
Crawfoot-'Yes. he said roof gardens.
That's the only place they have room
for gardens in the city.'-Chicago Daily
News.
In no Position to Interfere.-"Your
daughter plays a great dea of classical
music in a rather original way re-
marked he man with gold glasses.
Yes" answered Mr.. Cumrox, regret
fully. She bought the piano and the
music out of her own spending money,
and l suppose she feels that she has d
right to do what she pleases with
them.'-Washington Star.