The independent. [volume] (Lincoln, Neb.) 1902-1907, 1903-12-31
A Continuous Performance

n UUulJuuuuo CllVIuQuOU
Editor Independent: II Mr.. Bryan
had time to waste on the dreary sue
cession of his own interments by the
Washington Post and similar journals,
he certainly would be amused.
The first sepulchrel function took
place in November. 1896, when the
editorial undertakers formally con-
signed the Nebraskan to what they
fondly imagined would be his last
sleep. 1t was an occasion which will
long linger in the memory, rendered
beautiful and touching as it was by
every art which malice and villifica-
ton could employ. But, although the
corpse had officially been pronounced
dead by the most eminent gOld-cure
physicians, it was hardly entombed
when it began to show signs of ami
nation, and actually rose through sew
eral feet of political mud, apparently
as vigorous and cheerful as ever.
But, acting by anology to the prin-
ciple that when man Is legally dead,
he must be executed as often as nee
essary to make him actually dead, sub
sequent interments of the resurrected
body occurred at intervals of a month
or so with the usual result) until
November, 1898, when the second an
niversary of the first function was OBJ
served with more fOrmality.
This seemed only to give the grave
diggers more zest for their work, and
the burials proceeded again, every
four weeks, or whereabouts, until No
vember, 1900, when the quadrennial
anniversary of the first obsequies was
observed with all the gloomy splendor
which imperial ways and means could
device. On this memorable occasion,
several feet of sacred earth, taken
from the imperial courtyard Of Queen
Victoria, was carefully deposited
above the usual quantity of admins
tration mud, in order that the corpse
might be duly impressed by the SOL
emnity of the occasion. But the corpse
was so little impressed, physically or
otherwise, that its immediate resur-
rection followed with the usual
promptitude, and with every indica-
ton of renewed strength and conf
dence.
But the ineffectiveness of the under
takers work seemed equalled only by
their perseverance, and the monthly
burials continued. Holy soil, actual
| ly trodden by Queen Victoria's success
sor and by the German emperor, was
| deposited on the grave from time to
time, but without effect. The last
general Obsequies occurred in NOvem-
Der, 1902, and all the time that the
grave-diggers can spare from the cur
rent interments are at present en-
ployed in preparation for the most
magnificent sepulture of all, scheduled
to come off on November 5, 1904. All
indications, however, point to a usua
resurrection.
Newspaper life Is subject to many
i vicissitudes, and it must be com.
forting reflection to the republican
press and its ally, the democratic mo
nopolistic press, that, if they ever fai
in journalism, they may be able tt
earn competence in the undertaking
business.
But, to abandon the language O
smile for plain English, our friends
the undertakers, will do we'll to re
member that Mr.. Bryan and his doc
trines will have purifying, invigor
ating, and Americanizing influence OF
the institutions and policies of tn
United States, long after the autho
Of plain duty" and criminal aggres
sicn," the bo3ster of "the flag shall
stay put the author of "stand pat
and all the lesser demagogues AM
jingoes shall be buried past resurrec
. ton, to be remembered only as tn
chief actors in the nightmare OF Amer
lean politics. JOHN SAMPSON.
Washington, d. G.