The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1903-04-12

check. Oh, he whit on, pretend1n TO
JUS recognize Charleymayne Tower,
didn't know We at first. 1 thought We
was tn waiter he says. Loud an
long was tn laughter provoked be this
kingly sally. TIL jest flew like wildfire
through tn crowd. Fair ladies smiled
behind their fans. Bring me a cup iv
tay an some spare ribs says tn Pm
cess Olgoinskia with maddenfn' smile.
What is tn title iv tn king Nv yeer
country, Misther Tower?' drawled
Lord Ronald in his mos supercilyous
tones. 1t is head waiter?' he says.
'Mong doo,' said tn Veecont; America
it is a lar-rge RESTRAINT, amt is? he
says. TIL air was filled with cries Nv,
Waiter Here you 'Ss-st.' Boy,
tn bill Amt I niver goin' to get
that pie? An so on. Charieymayne
Tower hurrid firm tn room. While he
was standin' at tn dure iv tn palace
an lookin' down with horror on his
broadcloth pantaloons, a gran jock
came behind him, tapped him on tn.
shoulder an said: Call Grand JOCK
Oscaroffsks hack an be quick about
it Charleymayne Tower cud hear no
more. He leaped firm tn scene Nv his
disaster an calm drofsky, babe tn
dhriver haste at wanSt to tailor
mans. There he ordhered tn suit
toll We about. Wan week later tall
magnificently attired man sthrode into
tn rile chamber. 1t was tn American
ambassadure. AS he marched along a
buzz iv excitement ran acrost that
splindid room. TIL English ambassa-
dure turned with an oath an left tn
rile prisince. 'Malydiction,' says the
Veecont Boulbaze. LIE stuff is off, TIL
Gran Duchess Olgarina give Il passi3n-
ate cry an tainted. TIL American am
bassadure sthrode on, unmindful iv tn
excitement. TIL car, who is a prudent
husband, stint his wife firm tn room
Thin, steppin' firm tn throne, he adj
vanced to meet tn riprisintative w.
gr-reat people. TIL ambassadure was
preparin' to kneel whin tn monarch
said: Nay, Charleymayne, kneel not
to me in thin pants on this fiure. Rath-
er sh"d l kneel to thee, FIR niver since
king an tailor jined together to rule
tn wurruld has human legs been en-
cased In so happy a pair iv boomers.
AT last America takes its thrue station
among tn nations iv tn earth That
night tn threaty was signed be which
tn car agreed to sind three millyon
Rooshyan Jews to this country befure
tn first iv May an Lord Ronald hurled
himsilf firm tn great Popolapotcheff
bridge into tn Neva afther shootin' his
tailor. Now they have promoted Char
leymayne Tower but his UNIFORM re-
mains upon tn banks iV tn frozen
NeVa an against 1t nayther arrysto-
crat intrigue nor despotic whim will
prevail.
Il think it's a good thing, Hinnissy.
It's goin' to save us a lot iv throuble
IN plckin' out diplomats. 1t will no
longer be nicissary to find some wan
VINO Wudden't Wurruk at home an
whose rilitives wud like to sind him
out Nv tn country to uphold tn dig
nifty an honor iv our fair land abroad.
All we have to do is to get tn UNIFORM
an, thrust amy kind iv a man into it.
Tn prisidint has designated a pair iy
olive green pantaloons an a ecroo coat
10. be ambassadure extraordinary an
minister plinipootinchry iv tn United
States at tn coort Nv Saint Jeems.' TIL
Hon'rable Caliphas Snivvy has been
promoted firm TIL Hussar's uniform
at LISBON to tn more important suit
at Madhrid.' TIL demands iv tn Unit
ed States governmint on tn impror iv
emmy was presented yisterdah be a
pear SKIN cap, a blue an silver coat
an a pair tv yellow pantaloons. TIL
lnpror was much imprfssed!dmIt'll be
grand. Whin tn prisidint wants to
nnd an imissary FIR an important miss
yon he'll call on a tailor. THEY'LL he
signs In tn windies Nv tn clothin'
stores: plymouth Rock diplomats;
they niver tear 'Nobby styles in
american ambassadures, fifteen dol
lars An there We ARE"
We'll, it must be thryin' to he toolx
fr waiter" said Mr.. Hinnissy.
1T is" said Mr. Dooley. ut is ex-
thremely annoyin' to tn proud soul Nv
MESSENGER to be mistook FIR a. walter
But l shud like to hear what tn wait
ers think about 1t. Annyhow, I bet no
wan 1ver took Binjamin Franklin FIR
a waiter
Il wondher why?" asked Mr.. Hen
messy.
Il don't know" said Mr.. Dooley con-
less 1T was that even in tn prisince iv
a king Binjamin Franklin niver felt
like q waiter"