The Birmingham age-herald., 1903-08-23

stepped on his corns and after he had let forth several expressions more forci- ble than elegant The president was to the coloners tale of woe and made no comment. But when that worthy de- manded thet the conductor be immedi- atey dismissed, the president wheeled about, glared a few moments at his vis- itor and then stated emphaticaly that he would do nothing of the kind Then the noises started.
 When Colonel Whoopdeah left the of- fees of the Delauny Consolidated Fly pbenated Electrical Power and Supply company his face was red and his tenn per was sadly vexed. The president had a small grudge against the colonel, any way. The coloners mind was in a tur- moi, but one thing was certain. He would never again so long as he lived ride three feet on the cars of the De- launy Consolidated Hyphenated Electri- cal Power and Supply company. 1t was just at this juncture that the colonel had an idea. He became so absorbed in thought that he forgot all about his wounded dignity and suddenly looked up with a smile of satisfaction overspread- ing his countenance. The great project for the establishment of the Spinkville automobile express trains was then In nebulous state, as 1t were.
 ''The scheme looks feasible,' muttered the colonel to himself, "and, by George! I will get Major Smith to cooperate with me in forming a company" No sooner said than, done. The colonel immediately wended his way to the palatial residence of his friend where he was closeted for several hours. When he emerged his face was radiant The Spinkville Auto mobile Express company had been or ganzed with a capital stock of $1O000O.
 One day several months after SpinlSville was surprised to see coming down her streets huge automobile bus that was handsome to Il fault in every detail. The splendid machine created an immense sensation, and when it was learned that Colonel Whoopdeah and associates would shortly begin @ fight against the Delauny Consolidated Hyphenated Elec- trical Power and Supply company the ex- citement was increased. The new arrival in town was nothing more or less than the Business Mans Express" which would shortly leave for the hustling city of Delauny with a load of wealthy su- burbanites on board.
 The "express' started at 8 o'clock that morning, and as the new scheme had been widely advertised there were quite a number of suburhanites assembled at the trim little station to take advantage of the free ide into town which was offered by the management on the in- itial trip. Skeptical grins adorned many countenances.
 The huge motor was painted a glowing crimson, but so harmonious was the blending of color with equipment that there was nothing loud. The machine was capable of seating twenty-five per sons comfortably. and the interior was furnished in the most luxurious style imaginable. Promptly at the appointed hour the automobile whistle gave a hor- rible screech, the business hustled on board. and they were off. It was a peculiar coincidence that trolley car belonging to the Delauny Consolidated Hyphenated Electrical Power and Supply company came humming along at this juncture bound for town. All those on board creaned their necks to catch glimpse of the express" and some made violent effort to be funny.
 When the trip was begun there were all kinds of surprises in store for the passengers within the handsomely equip ped bus. Portly bankers looked about in vain for straps. They were not there. Instead of glaring suggestions to use Sapolio staring them in the face. the