The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1903-02-19

TINE kicker differs from the re-
former inasmuch as he only
points out evils, and lacks the
ability to devise remedies for
them. The kicker is an undeveloped re-
former, or refermer marred in the
moulding. Under favorable conditions
the kicker will develop into reform
or, and under unfavorable con-
ditions the reformer will degenerate
into kicker. The kicker, like the re-
former, is sometimes a nuisance, but
unlike the reformer, he is not always q
necessity.
The kicker differs from the knocker
insofar as he is not always actuated
by mean or selfish motives. He forms
the connecting link between the knock
er and the reformer. AZ
Mankind may be conveniently divid-
ed into five great classes, namely: Fools,
villains, knockers, kickers, and reform
'ers. We place villains above fools
because there is some hope for change
for the better for the villain. There is
no hope for fool-he is just plain fool,
and you can't make anything else out
of him. Therefore, don't be fool.
This classification is meant to take
account of the male portion of man
kind only. The classification of females
will only be undertaken by self-con-
ceited ass or some professional fossil,
or, if you like it better, by some fossil
lied professor, who never came in con-
tact with mere than half dozen
females during his long period of grad
ual petrescence. Women cannot be
classified. There's only one absolute
certainty about women: they must die.
/. But as this axiom pertains to all other
organized beings as well, it would be
futile to make it the starting point Of
an attempted classification of women.
Generally speaking, it,may be said,
however, that the wlsest of them are
foolish, and even the most foolish is
wiser than the man who thinks he
understands her. It may be postulated
that the more we know about women
the less do we know them. This may
seem paradoxical, but that doesn't
matter. Woman, from Mother Eve
down to the most recent arrival Of
feminine humanity, always has been,
and it seems from present indications
woman of the future always will be,
paradoxical in her nature, thoughts
and actions. But let us dismiss the
dear creature-with blessing of
course-and return to kickers.
We find kickers in all walks of life.
There was a time when even the men,
bers of football team were not only
kickers, but kickers only, but nowadays
in order to win games they must be
sluggers and biters as well as kickers-
another sign of the degeneration of
our times and things. The desire to
kick is innate in some men, and the
qualification of the desire is often pro-
ductive of much good-it amuses the
kicker and some of the bystanders, and
harms no one. Kicking is habit,
and like all other habits its growth is
in proportion to its indulgence. There
are many types of kickers, but we
have time only to take peep at the
three most pronounced types, to-wit:
The kicker who kicks for himself only;
the kicker who kicks for others; and
the kicker who kicks at any and every
thing.
The kicker who kicks for himself
only is prominently the kicker who
kicks when he has a kick coming. He
generally minds his own business. He
don't care rap what happens to his
neighbor. He fights his own battles,
and expects everybody else to do the
same. He may be aware that one per-
son is cheating another at cards or dice,
and never say word. He may be an
eyewitness to robbery or a murder,
and be totally unconcerned. Even If
he sees q man beating his wife, 1t is
safe to bet that he will not stop to act
as peacemsker. What are these things
to himP He cannst bother himself