The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1903-07-26
FUN OF THE WORLD.

little girl thus described dachshund seen:
1T one of those funny ones-you know. the ones
that are dos and a half long and half dog high
You must know the IL Is thai only has four
legs. but looks as if it ought 10 have six
< < <
Miss Helen Gould recently entertaining of the
girls clubs in which she is interested. at her home
the Hudson After the girls had walked about
grounds and Conservatives time invited
them to wander the house and the pictures
and objects OF While they thus engaged she
overeard the girls remark. confidently
parion: say. Mamie heaven Won't feaze Miss
Gould after this place"
K <
During Ethel Barrymore last engagement in Chi
cago she after-the-p performance
hostess and a number of her guests occup ed
boxes at the play Among these rather fresh
young who thought he had made impression with
Miss Barrymore. he kept his eyes on her throughout
the play. and tried hard TO impression
the dinner he had the coed fortune
sit the actress. When oppos tunity came
lie remarked under his breath: Did you
wink during the third act7" Yes" re-
sponded Miss Barrymore, in louder tone. didn't you
hear heart beat?"
ag zgs
The other morning. a who. from his dress and
speech had the appearance of being EngisInan.
tered Broad cafe and approaching the bar
asked for half and half" says the Philadelphia
Ledger.
1t seems the bartender was young man
business but he did the best he knew how. and
the The smiled looked critic
I,
is the porter
washing the windows. sir" cheeruf1y respond
ed the bartender
q
Andrew Carnegie tells story on an American
illustrates the imperturbability the
Scottish temperament. says the Boston Post.
The American, bicycIer to the shore Of a
lonely and q boat a examining the
conduc ed this examination lansudly. lie would pause
every little while to light his pipe and to ON
the weather such Indifferent subject with
friend who sat upon the bank. now reading news
paper and tossing pebbles idly into the stream.
The American got of his bicycle to rest and in an
said the bank:
What is your friend looking for? oysters?"
mo. My mother-in-law." the reply
< x
W. J. Hampton who has had experience in
county and the feud lands OF
Kentucky talking about the pecularities Of the
mountaineers, says the New York Times.
lone day." said he IL making inquiries about
who had been recommended to me as suitable
for rather responsible position but whom had never
heard.
very well known in the community.
is he?" 1 asked.
response in a apology. fer he hain't killed
body yit but he's mighty promisin
An old lady recently bargained with stand
Colchester railway station to take her into
the town, says Tit Bits.
The sum being agreed upon the dame returned into
cages which she handed to the cabman Again she
journeyed to the platform and brought cats.
A third trip she made bringing dantily
fox terrier and fourth expedition interrupted by
cabby explain ing
Begin your pardon. am but you amt expecting
a flood, l 'ope?'
Dear me. no." the reply; whatever made you
ask that question cabbyY'
oh it's all right. am. said Jehu. II thought Ia
ask COS / amt certain my swim. and
faneied by the look of your baggage that you
a'takin my keb for Noah's ark"
u x x x
A recent book THE Log of Cowboy" contains this
characteristic farwesern story told by the
punchers' about the campfire: II a
in Live Oak county. and there a rough stutter-
ing fellow there by the of Lem Todhunter. The
girls. il didn't to dance with him. and pre-
tended they couldn't understand him. He had asked
every girl at the party and received the
from each-they couldn't understand him. 'w-w-welI
to hell. then Ocean yy-you understand thar
he said the girl her brother threatened
mange him horribly il he didn't apologize which ne
finally agreed He went back the house and said
the girl: Yy-you needn't gg-so to hell y-yyour broth
and have m-m-made other arrangements"
z x <
General aden-Powel entertained by the Savage
Club the other evening spoke Of his desperate
counters with the American reporter II he stated
only by his eusiveness that had succeeded IN getting
back to England at all He needed all ne possessed OF
that quality keep out Of the Of the newspaper
correspondents there He had succeeded fairly well
eluding thought that until the last day of
his stay Il had sent the luggage board the
in which I 10 England and was just pay
ing the bin my hotel when the telephone bell
my room i answered the ring
Hello there said mans voice.
Hello I answered
Are you Waldorf hotel7 he asked
Il said Yes
Well. m the New York sun answered the other
You've got Gen. Baden-PowelI staying your
hotel
Denial difficult; under the circumstances: brt the
man o strategy equal the moral emergency
Il saw said the General. that he though: ne
talking the manager OF the hotel, and didn't Ike
To deceive him to disappoint him So said: Col
aden-Powen in my hotel, You don't x.
He is there. answered the gentleman
Il said. lie is here
Yes he e.. the reply Tie has got another
name. He calls himself CT smytfe'
oh yes him ls n Gen Badsn-PoNell7
You hold him. ai1 you sait the journalist. = n
coming Interview him. Hold him. please; hold him
until I come"
I thought a moment ard then said How can
hold him when he's gone
Oh he's gone has hsY snswersS the Other Has
he gone his ship
No. he has gone his ship. Re has gone iHto
the country I answered. Hes gore aSaY fer abolt
four days and when he's hack II h9'd him foT vuu-'
waiting Tor EtIi.