New-York tribune., 1903-08-17
LETTERS OF AN OLD MAID.
TO ANOTHER OLD MAID.

Dear Grace: 1 glad you spoke OF yourself
as "Old maid" in your last letter. II simplihes
the situation Your claiming the dear old oppro-
bious name gives distinct sense OF esprit de
corps We can now compare notes to the ad-
vantages and disadvantages of belonging to the
ssterhood. and to you 1 can acknowledge that the
disadvantages exist In speaking to men. to mar
ried women. and to young maids, 1 never make
such an acknowledgment; stand up stifiy for the
advantages. but. you see. there are two sides 10
almost every question.
They say there are no old maids nowadays. It's
true that there are none. in the old sense have
sometimes wondered whether the queer old ring
Ietted. straight wasted. comic valentine type OF
old maid ever really existed To be sure. I have
vague recollection OF having seen something Ike
her in the days Of my early childhood; but II the
type existed IL hasn't survived at least in outward
semblance. But many OF the conditions that made
life unbearable to that depressed sisterhood actu-
ally have survived unto this day. though the new
woman is too proud to complain OF them But
Just between ourselves-welll recall one or those
little wailng lines OF Jean Ingelow's-lines which
she had such pathetic art Of introducing. like
genuine childish cries Of sorrow. "Oh. for once.
let me complaint" For once let me confess to
fellow sister that we labor under few well de-
fined disadvantag ges-hke the rest OF and won-
ankindl The solitary path isn't all smooth and
sunny 7 may say in passing that II might %
smoother and SUMMER II it were really solitary.
It isn't The old maids obligations thoss
that she can never escape; they depend too abso-
Iutely upon her generosity. She could-possibIy--
desert the family snip at any moment but her con-
science viii not allow her. In order to be real.
comfortable old maid-in order to gain the free
dom for which she has sacrificed the chances OF
married Hfe-she has to be brutally selfish. Some
thing always depends upon her, yet her services
are usually gratuitous and unacknowlsdged All
claims upon life for life's sake denied to
her. Can she possibly have needs. aspirations.
loves and longings? Why nOt2 Ask married
woman and she VIII look at you as II you had
z,er
the public library! No married woman can quite
convince herself that an old maid is human being.
Why. what she live for. except TO wait upon
the needs of the rising generation and it's progen-
itors? II she does anything else. she Is less than
ever human: she has joined the ranks OF the pre-
sumably Disappointed Ones. who care for humanity
at large as an inadequate consolation for having
nobody to for in particular.
The unmarried woman is supposed to have no
joys sorrows OF her own. in brief no ego. She
is an impersonal being. She is unpardonably sell
fish II she sinks under the eternal weight OF the
haVing none Of her own? o % ros sae IL iSs1 uz mem
sighed an unhappy wife to Ito be entirely free
TO be what?" I asked. with unsuccessful at
Entirely care free. as you must be- OF course
being unmarried.
I,sS kneW an old maid who wrote verses ays' and
a married friend. standing as II paralyzed with
the magazine in her hand Why what do YOU
quent than words All purely literary OF course'
said the writer, with successrul attempt al sar-
caSm-
/ once introduced young man to Kate Jones
you know she is thirty and very charming.
Afterward he treated TO volumes OF aStonisned
exclamations over her state OF spinsterhood-
How 1t be. when she's so attractlVsE
don't understand itt'
It never seemed to occur to him tnsS ne a wss
talking a whose SPINS Sterhooe, pre-
sumably, surprised him not at all IasSkly e.
planned that Kate had had Lovers. wniSh So lz
10 satisfy his sense OF the fitness or tnngs- ne
hadn't Thought OF il beforei No one ever really
thinks that an old maid may have known tns iove
~ man unless she carries his portrait IN eiaSk
enamelled locket and hangs a PhotostapH o Ms
tcrnhsfone over the mantlepiece-
Vi tell YOU OF these grievances because you must
-. -3srfarced them in form other But.
Ike : me YOU must remember the time when glri
.-Ns. -corsdered an old maid ar Twenty-Five. and
49,, Mas IA maids were out OF the social running
s1tooather So we've fallen on better DAYS and
sv raj each other on respective backs At
the see OF twepty-nine was censured for wearing
n fa-se beaver hat with a long feather. after the
. % asbton ~ the times I could now or It's
rorre snonding type. without comment. at the age
: os~~ Goodness. what a long wall I've uttered
Next time. perhaps I'll tell you Why were happy.
Yours fraternally. PFtlSclLi-A