The San Francisco call., 1903-09-20
Copyright. 1907

- might not have occurred to YOU to
md the head captain terrible to look
upon. had you seen him first without
\ ms UNIFORM There seems TO be some
tnlhg essentially pacific in the effect
OF broad tui'.-over gingham collar.
oiue neck-ribbon and a wide straw hat.
but could you have encountered him in a
Dlack cambric mask with pinked edges. a
Droad sash OF Turkey red wound tightly
Aoout MS waist. and that wide collar
turned up above his ears, you might have
sung another trEe.
Ine Lieutenant was distinctly less i'm
pressive- His sash. though not so long IS
the head captains. was forever coming
united and trailing behind him. and as he
often retreated rapidly he stumbled and
fell over il twice out Of three times
Moreover. he was not allowed to turn his
collar uD except on Saturdays. and the
one his sister had made for him from
wrapping paper had an exotic not TO saw
amateur theatrical effect that was far
from convincing. The eyehoIes in his
mask. too. were much too Iarge-show-
ing. Indeed. the greater part Of both
cheeks, each Of which was provided with
a deep oimple- Seen in the daytime he
was MOTTO speak confdentiaIIy-very
swesome.
As Tor the vicar-well, there were OBJ
stacles IN the way of her presenting such
an appearance as she would have liked.
In the first place there was not enough
Turkey red TO 90 evenly round and 10
her disgust she had been obliged to nut
up with a scant three-quarters of yard
not wide strip at that What was by
courtesy called the wears waist was not
far from three-cuarters of a yard in CIR
cumference. which fact compelled her to
strain her sash tightly in order to be able
10 make even a small hard knot TO say
nothing Of bows and ends. She had no
collar Of any kind-her frocks were gath
cred into bands at the neck. So the vicar,
in wild attempt at masculinity. had pri-
vately borrowed a high linen collar of
her uncle. The shirts in her uncle's
drawer had printed inside them, Wear a
seventeen-and-a-half collar with this
shirt" so you will not be surprised to
learn that the vicar occasionally fell into
the collar. so TO speak, and found herself
most effectually muzzled.
But the worst was her mask. Her hair
came down in a heavy bang almost to her
straight brown eyebrows; her round.
brown eyes were somewhat short sighted;
her eye-holes were too small. In conse-
Quence OF these facts, whenever II was de-
sirable or necessary TO see an inch before
her nose she was obliged to push the
mask up over her bang, when It waved
straight out and up. and looked like some
high priests mitre-
Her title was due to her uncle, who, TO
DO him justice. was as innocent OF his in
huence IN the matter as OF the loss OF
his collar.
when a person isn't the head OF the
pirates. but is an of1icer Just the same
and has some say about things, what do
you call that?" she asked him abruptly
one day. He was reading at the time
and not unnaturally understood her to
say ''the head Of the parish"
why. that is called vicar, suppose
you mean" he answered
"A vickerl Does he have some say?'
Some say7'
''Yes'-impatiently-"s say. He
hasn't got to DO the way the others tell
him ell the time, has he?"
''oh, dear. no. Don't you know Mr..
Wright down at the chapel? He's called
the vicar. He really manages it.
think. OF course it's not like being the
rector"
(AcPCAs ~ NAoN lAAc OA4lg A4LO OF WICK
er. like Mr.. Wright?''
why, OF course not. sillyi There are
lots OF different kinds"
"ohi" and she retired, pgacticing the
word. the others were much impressed
by her cleverness in discovering such a
fascinating title 1t savored of wicked
and villain, to begin with: and. pursuing
the advantage OF their previous ignorance
Of It, she invented several privileges and
perouisites OF the Office.
One OF these was the right to sum-
mon the band, when the head captain had
decided on an expedition, to any meet
ing place she saw ft; and, though ia a
great many ways her superiors found her
a nuisance. the lieutenant in particular
ob3ecting IN q nagging, useless sort of
way TO most OF her suggestions, they
could not but admit that her selection of
mysterious, unsuspected rendezvous was