The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-09-20
hose who had come to New For kto see
 foAt

those Who nad come to New For kto see sights.
 'on your left is Central Park" I heard him drone away a moment later,
 "Oh, hang the Central Park" I mutt tered disloyally. for I love the Central Park. but why point out mere places when you have interesting people to burn on every side. thought I. And then, as IT In response to certain telegrtphic suggestion, the lecturer went on:
 While standing on the corner ex- changing views on the subject of the higher education in the Philippines are MT. J. Pierpont Morgan and MT John D. Rockefeller. MT. Morgan is the short CT Of the two-physically. I mean MT. Rockefeller may be distinguished by the suaviter in modo with which he toys with the solid gold oil can which he wears as a charm on the end of his watch chain. That bundle which Mir. Morgan carries in his right hand and With which he is slapping MT. Rocke. Teller on his scarfpin Is not a morning newspaper, but a handful of undigested securities which he is taking up to the New Dietetic Hospital, endowed by the
 Hon. Russell Sage, for treatment This we consider to be one of the most inter- esting tableaux fr1s our tour. Good after noon, Mr. Morgan. Howdy do, Mir, | Rockefeller" he added. genially shaking his hand at the two magnates upon the corner. both of whom returned the salu-
 tation immediately with interest-six per cent from MT. Morgan and three per cent from MT. Rockefeller. So impressed was with the enterprise | of the Coaching Company in securing | such an aggregation for the edification of It's patrons that paid little attention to | the further observations of the lecturer l until we had passed out of the residential 0anttnY1 nct of kaI Hov, | to the depths of the park. Once therein, however, was brought back to the ma terial things by startling announce ment from the step to the following in- tent:
 '"The green sward to the left, which you will see swarming with well-dressed | men and smartly gowned women, is the | celebrated Park Common. The ladies and gentlemen walking about thereon are
 part of New Yorks famous four hun dred, brought here from Newport every Thursday at enormous expense Watch | ing them Is a liberal education in man. | ners. not to mention customs, for which | we make no extra charge. We have to. day only 1.58 of them present due to
 the oppressive heat, which has prostrated | the less robust. To the left leading two
 uger cubs and an orangoutang, is MT. | Willie Van Gilt, whose name you have
 possibly heard as the inventor of the much-talked of giraffe dinner given last season at Newport. Next to him, talking
 to the hippopotamus. is Mr. Bolivar Cash | box, the present champion in that new l game and social fad of the hour, progress
 sive matrimony. Mrs. Cashbox has had
 seven husbands in three years and, pend. | ing the trial of her current suit against
 MT. Cashbox in South Dakota, Is en.
 gagged to five gentlemen. whose names
 will not be officially announced until she | has received her decree. The young mar | behind the lemonade stand is MT. Mar. | maduke Bronxton, the champion long distance cotillon leader of this season | who has record of having danced twen | ty-seven miles between one A M. ant
 bedtime. In the centre of the group, jus l south of the hippopotamus, wearing blu,
 glasses and carrying a red silk parasoI
 is Mrs. Hollikins de Swell who wears a
 all hours of the day sixteen pounds O i diamonds. f1fty-five yards of rope mad,
 of pearls. freshly imported from Oyste
 Bay every morning. six quarts of rubie | and a coronet whose estimated yalu touches seven figures. Her husband
 Holly de Swell, the distinguished presi
 dent of the Archaeological Society a
 Fordham. is not with her. having spen
 the last five years in Central Africa look | ing for the summit of Mount Chimboraz
 in the interest of science"
 And so he went on. A more entertain
 ing lecture I never listened to. nor wal
 a more distinguished looking lot of ex
 hibits ever produced. Nor did the outing
 lose in interest as we drove on, gaining
 rather as we proceeded home, past tn,
 ''spot where the statue of F1tz Green,
 Halleck and Robert Burns once stood. down to the terminal, a beautiful trian I gular park bounded by Twenty-third ant
 Twenty-second Streets on the north anc
 south, and by Fifth Avenue and Broad
 way to the west and east respectively
 ''the site of the former F1atiron Build
 ing" the lecturer said, land now turnet
 into an isle of safety for shoppers wh,
 have not learned to sail against a hea, I wind. and who do not care to be run owe | by trolley cars, automobiles or hanson
 cabs while crossing the street."
 Thank you for a most edifyinR after
 noon" said to the lecturer as I alight ed from the coach.
 He eyed me narrowly. By the way
 did you pay your fare?" he demanded. And then I woke up.