The semi-weekly messenger. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1897-1908, 1903-06-05
HERE and THERE.

Il think I'll call this automobile
~Tamrnany." Why" Because its
such a perfect machine. Puck.
Il suppose" said the city girl. that
you have no acolytes in your church"
NO. we are going to put in electric
light next fall.'-Chicago Daily News.
We have it on reliable authority that
as soon as Georgia is done layir'-by
cotton. she's going to whirl in and write
the Great American Novel.-At!anta
Constitution.
Observation-Disclosures last butter. Mr.,
Dreamer. was q little strong" Dairy
man-"EcS. I found that out before I
sent it. So 1 told Mr.. Wigs to give
you short weight. 1t was the best thing
we could do, o know. under the cir
cumstances.'-Boston Transcript.
It's an eight-hour day for about
everybody now. isn't it?'' "Oh. no.: rot
for the employers" And why not for
them?" Because, if they had been con-
tent with an eight-hour day. they
wouldn't have succeeded in becoming
employers.'-Chicago Evening Post.
Don't you want to go back 10
African" No, sun answered Mr..
Erastus Pinkley. Fl did favor de pro-
jock till I took up de study of natural
history. 1 finds dat while ostricnas is
a heap bigger dan chickens, dey :sn'
nigh as good to eat.'-Washtngton
Star.
" come" said the orator, Ito bury
Caesar. not to praise him" There was
a movement in the rear as a large. fat
gentleman pushed to the front. one
moment, Mark he exclaimed; this
funeral can't go on until Undertaken
Claudius Eronicus joins the union
Baltimore News.
A young lady in a neightoring town
writes The Record to know if she
can't get a position in the telephone
exchange in Greensboro. We do rot
know. but our advice to her is to get
married or go to jail-either IS prefer
able to the position she Wants.-Greens-
bOrO Record.
The benefits of the Oxford Orphan
asylum are not restricted at all to the
children Of Masons. It's claim to the
people of North Carolina is that. so far
as its capacity will permit, it receives.
cares for and trains children from al
sections of the state, who are needy
and homeless. 1t is a power in the
rescue of lives, in the salvation Of
souls.-kinston Free Press.
When the Billville prodigal SOL re.
turned he slOuched around on the out
side of the farm, and finally mustered
up courage enough to dispatch the ines
sage to the old man: Father: This is
to let you know that your Proj;cKin'
Son have came n is mighty tired and
Hungry" The old man thought a no
ment. and hen said to the messenger:
Tell him eff he kin tackle bacon an
greens, to come in an fill up; but Ill
be darned eff I'm in he veal business al4y
more!"-Atlanta Constitution.
An interesting contest is shortly ID
be pulled Off between representatives
of ST. Louis and Milwaukee in some
disinterested city probably Chicago,
The st. LOuis champion claims that he
car play a piano twenty-five cOnSecu-
tive hours. while the Milwaukee hero
says he can do at least three hours
better. A meeting between them is to
be arranged. when the long distance
piano championship will be settled
The class of music and the nerves Of
the neighborhood, Boz course, ere not
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES News.
The action Of the Pennsylvania re-
publican state convention and the re
suit of the controversy by Senator
Hanna to the Endorsement Of President
Roosevelt are accepted all over the
country as insuring the absolute GER
tainty of the presidents nomination
next year, barring unforeseen and i'm
probable accidents. Not only is there
no competitor making an active con-
test for the prize which is the legiti-
mate object Of Mr.. Roosevelt's NInbi-
ton and the natural tribute to- be eX-
pected from the people if they are salts
fed with the discharge of the, duties
rnrnnI 1Jrnr him NV tho fro oTF, loo ~
of President Mckinley, but there is nc
apparent chance for a competitor if he
did care to test his popularity against
the presidents.-New York Tribune.