Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1903-02-02


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sack HARDY had often laughed
ID ut his friends and business asso-
" ciates about turning over new
leaf or Swearing Off" on New Years
Day. He was inclined to be proud OF
his cyniclsm. for he had never known
of single pledge having been Kept
longer than fortnight.
Hardy never let his conscience wor-
nv him about New Year resolutions.
His conscience had tirst-class excuse.
but he simply wouldn't listen to IT,
Mrs. Hardy had given him swear
off, talk regularly the last week OF
each of the six years they had been
married, so he was not surprised wheh'
on the evening of Dec. 81. she asked
him to come into the library for few
minutes after dinner. as she had some
thing of Importance to say to him.
Jack" began Mrs. Hardy. you'll be
33 next month, and"
Hardy knew the formula. and inter-
rupted.
wen get at it straight this time.
said Mrs. Hardy, as she procured pen
ell and paper and requested MIN 10
answer all questions as asked. When
she had finished examining him as to
his weekly program of life, she said:
"Now, let me read you what | nave
Monday nght-theater. usually.
"Tucsday night-club.
Wednesday night-club.
Thursday night-secret society.
'Frilay night-club.
saturday night-another secret So
ciety.
ay-miscellaneous dates. Oc-
casionally at home"
Hardy had to laugh at the way he
was being handled.
"Now," said Mrs. Hardy, triumph
antly. where do l come In? How
many evenings do you spend with me?
Only one, and that ut the theater Now,
let's see how much time you actually
spend at home"
She figured rapidly for few sec
onds, and then annOunced:
Barely one-third Of your time. Sun
days included. is spent at home. In
other words, you dine here. sleep here
n few hours in the early morning. ana
pass few minutes here at breakfast.
don't think it's being bit nice to me.
Jack, to say nothing of the injury 1t
is doing your health. Now, then, here
is a program which | wish to substi-
tute for your present one:
monday night-theater.
'"ruesday night-club.
"wednesday night-home.
"Thursday night-secret society.
"Frday night-homc, possibly thea
ter.
saturday night-home.
SUNDAY home and church.
"Retire each night not later than II.
BE Mt office each morning not later
than 9:30."
Hardy did not surrender without q
struggle, but Mrs. Hardy was deter
mined, so at last he pledged himself to
live up to her program for one month.
beginning Jan. l.
Hardy's business required his guild
ing presence each morning as early as
8 o'clock, but he was rarely In his
office at that hour. His clerks were
accustomed to seeing him rush In
about 10, frequently later. and throw
the office into an uprOar. and when
on the morning Of Jan. 2 he arrived
promptly at g. and In quiet and evil
IDENTITY good spirits. his face showing
signs of having been permitted to go
to sleep for n proper length of time,
they exchanged anxious ganccs AS
soon rs Hardy went out his conduct
4Yas freely discussed. One or two at
;ributel the change to New Year. but
mo majority We're apprehensive of
sroublc.
Hardy continued to come to his
efice at o sharp. all the while his face
growing rudderand his disposition sun.
nier. In two weeks the new spirit had
entirely pervaded the office. Business
W 1T with vim that was contagious
I, was all the talk on Hardy's floor in
the big office building.
Sut Hardy was having a hard time
Notwithstanding the fact that surface
indications were to the contrary. The
worse tug came ut night. His even
ing at the club New Year week was
in a way, memorable. At 1920 he
abruptly broke away from one of the
most select circles that exclusive place
:tforded. and announced that he would
Lave to be off.
An engagement" was his eXplana
lion to the many queries. When he
vas gone it was the subject of CONVEX
s,ation. He had never been known tc
so anything like that since he had been
member Of the club. He. did not
show up again that week. and the
following Monday self-consttuted
committee Of three jovial spirits called
Mt his office to ascertain what was
wrong. The idea of New Year reso
luton lodging in Hardy was never sus