Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1903-08-08
THE HELPING HAND

s'----fs
Eugene Field. tie iate poet humorist Of
Chicago. probably gave; during his COM
paratively brief life, helping hand to
more incompetents and fallen ones Of the
writing trade than any man that ever
made q business Of writing for newspa-
pers." said one OF the Chicago correspond
ents who was on terms Of intimate friend
ship with the Little Boy Blue" author.
land. incidentally, his kindness was more
often abused by men to whom he freely
gave lifts than that OF any other man. rich
or poor. that I ever heard Of Before he
was married his bachelor lodgings in Chi
cago. as well as IN the minor western
cities in which he worked. always sheltered
at least one helpless ne'er-do-weel of the
writing trade whom Field was helping, and
often his apartments were so cluttered with
the hard-luckers. who had gouged them
selves, by their habits. out OF homes, that
Field often had to choose the alternative
renting a bed to sleep in himself. After
his marriage he declined to take the In
Vulnerable shfftless ones who applied to
him for aid to his home but he never turn
for them at clearly places around Chi
cago. stood for their meal tickets and
pocket change, got medical attendance for
them IL they were sick and never left on
that they had reached condition in which
they were capable of taking care of them
selves. In multitudinous cases he got Jobs
for such chaps on the Chicago papers. al
though not one out OF ten Of them ever
made good by buckling down to square,
sober work. 1t didn't make any difference
to Field. either. how often the same old
incompetent ones-'bums is the plain.
straight-Out phrase for them-turned up
at his office with the same old plaintive re-
quest for a pickup, the kindly-hearted,
enthusiastic fellow was always there with
the helping hand, and no amount OF In
gratitude could ever get him to turn down
a fallen fellow who had in better days
been his friend
Zone time. before his marriage, he was
entertaining at his lodgings bunch of no
Chicago newspaper men who had been go
ing the downward pace for long while.
Field wasn't in the habit of taking his
meals at his apartments. but the Idea
struck him that that would be a cheaper
method with his four guests on his hands,
and he rugged up cooking room, dished up
the first meal himself, and told off the four
ne'er-do-weels to take their regular turns
at the culinary department. This was such
a snap for them, along with the comfortable
sleeping place that he provided for them,
and the change that he freely distributed
among them for pocket money, that they
were loath to give the good thing up, and
they hung on to Fields outfit like q pup
to a root for an interminable length of time,
without ever making any sort Of genuine
effort to get work. But Field never seemed
to notice their hanging-on trait. and kept
the larder going and the supply of pocket
money up as II that sort of thing had been
his permanent mission in life.
"One day. while this was going on, Field
ordered four suits Of clothes-it was his
habit to let his wardrobe run down until
he looked positively seedy. and then re-
plenfsh 1t at one fell swoop. He had a
mighty objection to trying on clothes at his
tailor's, and SO, week or SO after he'd or
dered these four suits. they were delivered
at his lodgings without Field having given
them preliminary try-on to see If they
were any manner Of fit. He happened to
get home early on that afternoon for some
lying on his bed. So he tried them on. the
four suits In row. They were simply
abominable fits-Field wasn't an easy man
to fit under the best circumstances, and
when he refused to, try on the clothes he
ordered the tailor he patronized wasn't
really greatly to blame for such poor re-
suits. But these four suits simply hung in
scarecrow fashion on the somewhat lank
frame Of the poet. and when he had got
through trying them on he tossed them
aside In disgust.
HE wore his old clothes out that even
ing, and shortly after he had gone his four
ne endowed guests came alons-and spot
ted those four new suits of clothes. They
SACuduScu IHeanlHSIul SlanCeS with each
other-and then each man of the four be-
gan 70 wrap up I'm 2. newspaper one of those
suits of clothes Then they went out IN a
bunch and hooked those four suits at diff
Ierent pawn shops so as not to attract at
tent1on by the proceeding of pawning four
new suits at one loan office. When they'd
got the money on the clothes, they met up
with each other at prearranged corner,
and proceeded to develop stupendous jags
for themselves.
They feared to go back to the Field
apartments for some time, and so Field
didn't find them when he returned that
evening. But he found his four suits miss
ing, and he knew what had become Of the
togs-he'd had similar experiences before.
But he didn't rage around and shake his
fists at the blue skies-that sort of thing
wasn't like Eugene Field. He sat down at
his desk and wrote out a check for the four
suits, inclosing the check with the following
letter to the tailoring firm:
" Gentlemen: Herewith I inclose check
for the amount Of your claim against me
for four of the most bulgy and impossible
outfits Of ships Stops that were ever fash
Toned by one-ninth of man or nine of
them put together. I am not in a state of
wrath. however, for the four suits have
already been stolen from me by four
But they will know when they find them
selves reduced to the narrowing necessity
of wearing the clothes out-I wouldn't wear
them out to the woodshed after the morn
ing's kindling. So the jokes on them isn't
it? In the meantime. as the writing of this
check obliterates my bank balance you may
go ahead and make me a suit Of blue dun
garees-they won't have to have the merit
of fitting
"And Field wrote just as he felt-he was
glad to get rid of the Hitting clothes
even If he had to pay for them The four
outcasts who participated In the theft were
odd times pensioners Of Field up to the time
Of the poets death. and not to any one of
them did he ever hint that he possessed
even an idea Of what had become of the
four badly-fitting suits Of Clothes"
The Cheapest kilograms.
From the Review Of Reviews.