The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-07-24
Observation-Disclosures
SPARKS.



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Oh, Paddy. dear. an did ye hear
IN news that's gOin round?
IN English king now has his tut
On good Guild Irish ground
tn frishmin have All turned out
T. give hum tn glad hand,
An hes oaleiing L thin hot air talk
Enough [ bate tn band.
This tn most amazin dOins
The cOunthry's liver seen
We soon NAV have tn Sassenach
A wearin' Of tn green.
No doubt the bartender who refused
to permit the stamps on his stock OF IL
quors to be inspected was unaware of
the high standard of temperance main
tanned in the local revenue collectors
Office.
The Y. NJ. c. A. proposes to have in
It's new building a soda water fountain
where none but soft drinks viii be
served, which win prove quite now
city.
1t is still a tie between the mayor and
tho council on the Parley's canyon res
ervoir proposition. with two vetoes
against two passages. Meanwhile.
don't drink Of sprinkle. We may need
the water.
1t is. of course. absurd to say that
jealousy of the prominence the postof-
fee department has received is back of
the suggested Investigation of Indian
affairs by the interior department
OF course, out here in the west we
do not have much opportunity for race
wars. but we manage to keep in touch
with modern enlightenment by having
range wars, with an occasional lynch
ing thrown in.
The most startIig feature of that war
in Venezuela, as reports come to us, is
that people are actually being Killed.
If, as Mr. Marten. NJ. P. says, the
little islands near BorneO are derelict,
whose business is it if the United
States does take them?
BY their failure to finish the new
jail within the specified time the con-
tractors are in effect paying a fine and
serving time in Jail as we'll.
It is noted that in keeping with all
traditions. the numerous conventions
being held in different parts of the
country are all the largest and most
successful in the history Of the organi-
zations.'
Japan says Russia may be all right,
but il is just as well to make her open
the Manchurian ports before throwing
bouquets.
The Breathitt county grand jury has
returned some indictments. The real
fun will probably begin shortly.
Hard. green apple
BY boy sighted.
Funeral chapel.
Friends invited.
Mr.. Harry Lehr denies that he came
to his door in pajamas and with 9. red
rose in his hair to receive a caSSer,
and says the statement is an attack on
his personal character. The facts in
the case. it is understood, are that Mr..
Lehr had a Worth gown on him and a
soup toureen inverted on his head.
President Schwab of the steel trust
is reported to be on the underground
in Philadelphia, under an assumed
name.
John Smith. state entomoIogist of
New Jersey, has discovered a new mos
quito with six wings. three on a side.
ana antennae curved backward. It
makes no noise and approaches its vic
tim by stealth. There appears to be
no reason why Mr.. Smith should make
his horrible discovery public and thus
add another terror to life in New Jer-
sey.
That the FiIiDinos are inherently
mean is shown by their reprehensiole
action nj keeping UP the trouble over
there after we have been officially as
sured that the islands are wholly paci-
fed
More light has been thrown on edu-
cStional methods at Jackson, KY. by
the news of a duel over cards at A
schOOlhouse, in which both principals
were fatally wounded.
No one need sorrow over the re-
ported card losses of Alfred G.. Van
derbilt and Young CoTbett. It isn't
as if they had TO work for their money.
stuyvesant Fish has succeeded in
having a newspaper cartoon suppressed
in New York. If he can do it every
DAY on some New York papers he viii
earn the gratitude Of a multitude Of
readers.
1t was not just nice of Mr.. Cleve-
land TO cOunteraCt whatever political
strength Mr.. Roosevelt might have de-
rived from has race suicide talks
throughout the country.
People who under ordinary conditions
would resent a suggestion that there
was insanity i'm their family frequently
dig up a crazy uncle or something
with great gusto when it is necessary
to make an insanity plea in court
Montana boasts citizen who sheds
his skin eachpyear. He is not the first
man who has been skinned in that Wig
Gus commonwealth. but few are accus-
toned to go against the game so often
as once a year
If the management Of the baseball
park would install electric fans in the
grand stand it would not only add
greatly to the comfort of the patrons