Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1903-06-22
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She-Why do you suppose they have
all the telephone wires so high in the
air? He-Oh. that is so they can keep
up the conversation, l suppose.-Yon.
kers Statesman.
Edyth-"Yes, Jack is inclined to flirt
a little, but his heart is in the right
placer Mayme-"Indeed! How long
has 1t been In your possession?-Chi-
cago Daily News.
A rainy day race: $50 you lost
again? "Of course" Couldn't the
horse you bet on runY Eyes: he could
run very we'll But he couldn't swim.
Washington Star.
"A number of her old flames have
combined to present her father with
a fire badge" "WhyY Because Of
the speed and completeness in which
be put them all out"-Judge.
Frililla-"Was your dinner a social
success Clorinda-"Yes, indeed.
You see, was careful to invite only
people who have the same kind Of ner'
vous prostration. brooklyn Life.
Where did your daughter and her
husband spend their honeymoon. Mr..
Godbugr "Blest II know. can't
even find out where they spent all the
money they d"-Washington Times.
"He had three days Of grace left in
which to pay the note. and he moved
at once to the Arctic regions. l Won
der why?~ "Well, you know the days
there are six months long."-Town
Topics
Advantage of position: Hold orr
exclaimed the boy who was under;
Tets arbitrate this thing!" "There
amt nothin' to arbitrator. painted the
boy ON top, pummeling him vigorous
ly.-Chicago Tribune
Ready for Easter: Deacon Cobbs-
WILLIAM If your father should have
$40 and some one should give him IS,
what would he have?" William
Nothing. But ma would have new
hat"-Chicago News.
She-'"The milliner told me that she
had been down to the dentists to have
a nerve killed" He-"Well, from the
prices she asks for hats, should say
the dentist must have killed the wrong
one. "-Yonkers Statesman.
"Oh. let me like soldier die!" ex.
claimed the leading man Of the barn.
stormers. "Oh, If l only had a gunv'
exclaimed some one in the gallery, in
tone that savored Of genuine sym.
pathy.-Chicago Daily News.
ITO what do you attribute the prop
critics Of your springsY' asked a visitor
at a health resort. "Well." answered
the proprietor. thoughtfully. II guess
the advertising I've done has had
something to 90 with it."-Puck.
Automobile perils: Yes, our Black
Spook, was demolished by running
into barn." ''Then suppose you
had to walkr mo, we had to run.
The farmer came after us with a pitch.
fork and bulldog" -Philadeiphia
record
Overwhelming evidence: Judge
You deny persistentiy that you com.
mitted the act. and yet the description
fits you eXactly-a beautiful face,
youthful appearance. pretty little foot. :"
Woman observation-disclosures, l confess
all."-T1t- Bits.
New phase Of 1t: "Yander goes
another specimen er de race problem"
exclaimed Brother Dockey. where ?"
Right vanderbilt man behind der
Niger is de sheriff. en- de niger Is
leadn' him by one hundred yards"
Atlanta Constitution.
THAT first wife Of mine never could
take Il joke" But she took you once"
Don't get personal. When she got
her divorce from Beimoolt last week
l sent her a message wishing her many
happy returns Of the day. and now
she refuses to even nod when we
meet"-Chicago Record Herald.