The semi-weekly messenger. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1897-1908, 1903-07-31
CLIPPINGS FROM OUR EXCHANGES.
HERE AND THERE.

New doctor. Ell? Has he done you
good?''"Well I've been Gone better
Puck.
He-"It will AXE about five years be-
fore DR.. Wood can become the head OF
the army" SHEA doctor at the head
OF the army. Ism thaJ too kiIling!"-
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
John" whispered ih4 wife. in the
middle of the night. = think l hear
some Il running in the cellar Go
to sleep, dear said the husband: its
only the gas meter."-Yonkers States
man.
Here is a significant item from a
Georgia exchanges; The lightning rod
man went to sleep under an oak tree
yesterday and was struck by lightning.
The same flash also struck a mule that
Vas grazing near by but the mule kick
ed it all TO pieces."-Atlanta Constitu-
ton.
H was regarded as a brilliant
young man. Yes answered Sena-
tor Sorghum. But he couldn't sue
coed in politics." Not in my state.
Lie llLdut lLlS SAINT ~ DlullucT. he
prided himself on being quick at re-
partee instead of quick at figures
Washington Star.
But your country is so new. said the
foreigner; you have no traditions
oh. l dunno. We've got old enough to
have men here who can hold their
grandchildren on their knees and tell
of experiences they had when they
We're professional base ball players
Chicago Record-Herald.
But / thought" observed the simple
minded person on the outskirts of the
crowd, that a king could do as he
pleased" Not at ALL" replied the
other person, craning his neck. Didn't
you see how he shuddered when he
kissed the other king? He didn't want
to, but he just had II do it."-Chicago
Tribune.
Tommy Tucker had 1een hurt while
performing the act he called Tipping a
freight train. Will ~ get we'll, doc
tori" ~distractedly asked Mrs. Tucker.
rs he out of danger?' He will get
We'll, madam" replied the surgeon,
but l can't say he is out of danger.
He will probably do the same thing
again the first chance he has.'-Chica-
go Tribune.
Oklahoma is still revealing unknown
and unsupported riches. Not long ago
a farmer near Shawnee was boring fol
water when his drill at the depth Of
sixteen feet struck a stratum Of red
lead so pure that all IS needle to make
it Into paint is to GRIND it in oil. The
product comes out in hard chunks, but
when soaked in oil it becomes plant
and adhesive, like putty, and when
spread on wood, iron or brick will not
rub off. Gas was struck in the same
Well.-EXchange.
A Michigan paper say that in Chi
licothe they are telling a good story on
a young a who holds d humble po-
sition in a printing office, says The
Kansas City Star. The young man is
very fond of the daughter of a minister
but his devotion of her is comparatively
new. The other Sunday he went tc
church to hear the father of his ina
morata preach, and unfortunately sat
down where everybody could see him
The text was, My daughter is griev.
ously tormented with a devil"
The burning fires" are increasing
The Chronicle has several times re
ferred to the fact that the Irish proph'
ct, st. Malechy, had foretold the pope
soon to be elected as the burning
fire." Ggnis ardens). Many have
thought that Cardinal Gotti is the mar
the pa pal lightning Will strike, as the
motto on his armOrial bearings is "ig
mis- arCans." But another leading can.
didate is Cardinal Sva,npa, and atten.
ton is being called to the fact that hi:
name in Italian means a flame of fire
Charlotte Chronicle.
The younger states and territorie:
which enacted lax marital laws in thu
hope of securing population NOR.
speedily have realized the error of theil
calculation. The authors of their oper
door divorce statutes assumed that per
sons going west for release from bur
denSome bonds would remain in thu
jurisdiction freeing them. The con
trary has proved the truth Immigration
to South Dakota has been especially
brisk by divorce-seekers, but immigra'
ton intended to be nome-seeking ha!
been undoubtedly checked by the scan
dalous reputation earned by its divorce
courtS.-Tarboro Southerner.
1t is said that the end of the investi
cation in the p%ostoffice department i:
not yet in sight. 1t was scheduled K
close about the time Of Presiden'
Roosevelt's return from the west, wax
then slated for a later date n is no
now looked for before September. The
report will be written by Fourth AsSis.
tant Bristow, who took six weeks t
prepare his report on the scandals IL
Cuba, and President Roosevelt ha:
promised that the document will b.
made public. Undoubtedly il will b
most interesting reading, In the Ian