The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1903-05-28
Short Stories


ger and met with about the same fate
that many interyiewers have had with
the former president of the Poers. He
found the old man in a very bad hui
NOR, and could get only monosyllables
in reply TO his questions. He employed
every art OF the interviewer, but to no
avail. Finally, despairing of getting
any information OF use to him by
straight questioning, he determined to
be diplomatic and approach Mr. Kruger
from his family side. SO he said, very
nonchalantly:
rs your wife entertaining this sea-
son?'
Short and sharp came the gruff an
swer:
Not very"
And the interview closed there.
An eminent Chicago lawyer tells this
story in the Brooklyn Eagle:
MY father always took a great in
terest in musical matters, and was Of
ten the patron of impecunious musi-
clans. Among the latter I remember
a certain Professor Schell, fine plan
list, who used to visit our house The
professor had been making a hard but
unsuccessful struggle, had become al
most disheartened and was seriously
thinking of giving up and returning to
Germany. My father, who thoroughly
liked him, had tried to encourage him
and had promised to aid him in finding
pupils; but still the professor vacillat
ed for many weeks One afternoon he
entered our library followed by my
father, and, walking solemnly up to my
mother, said, with an air of profound
gravity:
Madam, I hat burnt my breeches
behint me-
Good gracious!' calculated my
mother, with an involuntary, startled
glance in the direction of the profess
sor's coat tails.
my father interposed tactifully, the
professor meanwhile nodding acquies-
cence. You will be glad to know, my
dear, that what Professor Schell means
by saying he has burned his bridges be-
hind him is that he has leased a house
here for year and has now no choice
but to stay"
"'Oh!' exclaimed my mother, greatly
relieved. How delightful
My brOther-in-law was also an in
veterate and clever story teller, and
Of course, occasionally made slip, as,
for instance, on railway journey to
Brighton once, when he found himself
alone with a stranger The stranger
in conversation happened to ask my
relative, casually, if he were fond of
travelling, says Harry Turniss in his
Confessions Of a Caricaturist."
'|Traveling? I should rather think
so" he replied, angrily; and, imagin-
ing he was impressing someone who
was something in the CITY," he con-
tinued: Eyes, sir, I'm a pretty eXper-
fenced traveller. Been most round the
world and all that kind of thing you
know, and had my share of adventures,
l can tell you!"
After bit he gained more confidence
and launched into details, giving the
stranger, the benefit Of his experience.
why, sir, you read in books that
hunters of big game, such as tigers,
watch their eyes, Not a bit of it,
What you have to do is to watch the
tail That's the thing! 1t mesmerizes
the animal, SO to speak, and you have
him at your mercy"
On arriving at the hotel he found
that his travelling companion had just
signed his name in the visitors book
1t was Richard F. Burton, one of the
greatest travellers of the age! My
brother-in-law FASTENED to apologize to
Sir Richard for his absurd tales He
had no idea, of course, to whom he was
retailing his yarns.
word, please. was more entertained
icr1,t
have traveled-you lie SO WELL"
irwin Bachelor can always tell a
story of the North country, and this is
one of them, told in the New York
Times:
Up in st. Lawrence county," he said,
there was GOd-fearing old man who
ived in small village a few miles from
Potsdam. Mr.. Parker was an elder in
the church, a good husband and father,
and worthy citizen, who was much
respected in the community. One day
he hitched up his team and went off
with load of produce from his farm
to Potsdam. Night fell, but Parker
did not return. His family was much
frightened, for such a thing had never
happened before and they felt sure
that some evil had befallen him. His
son went to Potsdam and called at all
his fathers accustomed haunts, only to
find that the old man had sold his po-
tatOes and started for home before
dark
''The family remained in great dis
tress all night and until the next after
noon, when Mr. Parker drove IN at the
big farm gate. The old mans clothes
were torn, his face bruised, small
portion of his front scalp was missing
and his horse was broken winded and
all of lather. He vouchsafed no ex-
PLANTATION, but betook himself to bed,
where he slept for IA hours, waking
with rich brown taste in his mouth.
''The matter got noised abroad, and
eventually the minister and brother
elder called upon him.
Brother Parker said the minister
solemnly, it appears to us that some
explanation is due the church OF events
which have recently transpired, and we
have called to see if you have anything
to say about Them
'The old man spondered awhile. and
then asked: How long hev been
member OF the church, boy and MANI
'FOrty-SiX years, my brother