The Van Buren press., 1903-07-25

Mrs. VI. Quitting her arm around
the Highly-Strung Woman)-Nhat
was it all about, dear?
Mr.. II. Grritably)-I don't see the
necessity for rchearsing our little
family squabbles before every caller,
I'm going to dress for the theater.
win you be ready in half an hour,
Edith?
Mrs. HI don't believe I'll go now,
after you're being so mean to me. III
stay at home-aEd cry my eyes out
probably.
Mr., H.-Don't talk such nonsense.
I'll stop in for you when I'm ready.
He walks out.
Mrs. M.-Now tell me all about it,
dear.
Mrs. II. (picking up the pass which
Mr.. II. left behind and handing it to
the sympathetic Friend d)-There,
that's what caused the whole trouble.
You look it over while | fix my hair
and battle my eyes. But I'm not
going out with him unless he ex-
plains everything, and is nice about
it.
Mrs. NJ. (reading aloud) On ac-
count Of Kit, Who is this Kitty?
Mrs. II. (triumphantly)-That's
Just what | wanted to know. First
he told me it was one of Held's cho-
rus girls, then. when he saw how |
took it, he tried to turn it off as
joke.
Mrs. NJ don't believe it was a
joke, Edith. You know he did use
to carry on dreadfully before you
married him.
Mrs. II. beginning to weep AGAIN.
He said he never knew any chorus
girls.
Mrs. M.-The old hypocrite! That's
what his father took him out Of Har-
ward for. He used to chum with
Aldy Armand. whose uncle ran the
fremont. and both the boys were
behind the scenes three or four times
a week. Mrs. Armand told Mrs.
Barnes
Mrs. II. (hurriedly)-Don't, Emily,
| can't bear it. TO think we've been
married only year and half, and
Jack said to-day that he'd rather
have me go home to mother than to
have her come here.
Mrs. NJ. (sympathetically) ly)-The
brute
Mrs. H,-N-no, Jack isn't exactly
bru-bru-brute, but he doesn't un-
derstaud wom-wom-women
Mrs. Nj wouldn't let my hus-
band say anything like that to me
Why, its outrageous. | wonder what
She looks like. She's probably a
drugstore blonde.
Mrs. II, (hysterically)-I know
what she'd look like if | had her here
now. I'm not going out with him to-
night, anyway, win you stay and
comfort me this evening Emily?
Mrs. M.-Of course will you poor,
abused dear.
(The Highly-Strung Woman rests
her head on the Sympathetic Friends
shoulder and weeps copiOuSly. The
Average Man knocks lightly on the
door and enters, attired in a dress
suit)
Mr., II. (after an awkward pause)-
Well, Edith, haven't you come to
your senses yet?
Mrs. H,--N-no, and I'm not com
ing to- mean I'm not going TO see
any Of your old college friends.
Mr.. II. (asidc, in great disgust)-
What foolishness! (Aloud)-Come
dear, don't make such spectacle Of
yourself. Your nose is getting all
red and blotChed.
Mrs, NJ. (under her breath) What
mOnstcrl
Mr.. H. Clearing the remark)-Mrs
Medlar, ! think perhaps ! had better
make an explanation, since you have
succeeded in bringing this little mis-
understanding 20 such climax 1t
all began by the wording Of that
pass, which ! see you have appro-
priated, Merely in fun | said that
il was given me by a chorus girl
used 10 know. Now, common sense
ought 20 teach any woman that II
such had been the case | wouldn't
have told my wife. The Kit on that
card is the abbreviation fer Frank
Kitson, press rcprcS Scntatiyc for the
Hollis. You know him, Mrs Mcdlar,
and you also know that he and have
been friends for years, Now, ! don't
want TO be iuhospitnblc, but think
Edith and can settle this better
II we are alone for few minutes.
Mrs, NJ, (hiehly indignanO-Mr
Horuurg, you will never have the op.
portunity TO insult me in this Aat
again, will tell my husband what
you have said this very night, Good.
by, Edith, dear.
tThc Sympathetic Friend stalks out
of the room, The lIlghly.Strunr
Woman throws her arms around the
Average Man in O moist but affection
ate embrHccD
Mrs. ll-Nou were right, dear, II
was all her fault She stirred me up
as she always does aud she IL II med.
ding old thing, But you ought 10
have told me in the FIRST place that
Kit wasn't Kitty Oh, llcNyenSI
Catching sight Of her face IN a
glass; my nose il sight Bat wait
Il minute until I FIX II, CShe runs 70
the chinouicr ard mauipulHtcs a IT..
tie pulIy white thing for u few min.
utcs, then puts on her hat and comes
back 20 him), I'm all right now,
Jackets, N,s me and tell me where
we're going fer dinner I'm hat
starved, Crying always makes me
hungry,