Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1903-03-27

1dAI IOOlS we 1nOrIalS De! a
WV palpitating patriot down in
w Pennsylvania, burning with
laudable and sleep destroy
ing desire to offer himself upon the
altar of his country, was such an idiot
as to believe that he could accomplish
his ambition by Offering Hon. John R.
Proctor, chief Of the civil service COM
mission, bride of $50 to get him a
government job! Proctor had him ar
rested promptly and convicted with
great expedition. Really he ought to
have been defended on the ground of
incipient lunacy. am not much stuck
on some of Mr.. Proctors theories Of
finding out the fitness of men and
women for doing certain things, but
there is not a more honest or honora-
BILE man in the public service. He
held high position in Kentucky when
appointed to his present station and is
absolutely incorruptible. He did well
to have the harebrafned Pennsylva-
nian arrested. His vigorous action will
have tendency to kill the idea propa-
gated by base and malicious persons
that all public men are for sale, as
contemplate SANDER as was ever
Matched in the human brain.
The Fourth Time.
If the old saying to be true that ''the
third time is the CHARM" what shall
be said of the fourth time? Is it Sec
ond charm, double charm or hoo
doc? Before many moons wax and
wane Hon. Carter II. Harrison Of Chi
cago will occupy most favorable
coign of vantage for answering that
question, for he is now full fedged
candidate for fourth term in the may
! orally, When the votes are counted,
he and everybody else will know wheth-
er he is one Of the biggest men in the
country or whether he merely per-
formed the unfortunate caper of carry
ing his pitcher to the fountain once too
often. If he is elected, he will not
only be presidential possibility, but a
presidential probability. Grover Cleve-
land took the mayoralty route to the
| White House. Why can't Carter II.
Harrison do the same thing? Are we
not informed that history frequently
repeats itself? With Mayor Harrison
1t seems to be case of "Aut Caesar
aut nullus."
Redivivus.
Felix AIcClosky Of Greater New York
and of Washington recently delighted
all the denizens of the latter city by
| appearing among them in fairly good
health-at any rate, in the flesh, cheer
full and chipper-for the citizens of the
finest capital in the world who take an
interest in politics-which means the
entire population-had been mourning
Felix as dead one and had been read
ing funeral notices of him and pasting
them in their scrapbooks; consequently
they were infelix, which, being trans
lated, means unhappy. And why
shouldn't they have been infelix? He
Is one Of the great institutions of the
national capital. Before the Washing
ton monument was Felix was. He
saw the two wings Of the capitol built,
and the war, state and navy building,
and the Washington Post building, and
the Star building, and many other lord
~ mansions, and he was compelled to
live to see the new postoffice depart
ment building and Teddy's new "execu-
tive of6ce"-God save the mark! 1t is
hardly possible that Felix or any other
man would willingly have gazed on
those architectural monstrosities.
Felix was familiar figure in Wash
ington when "Old Buck" was presi-
dent, when General Sickles killed Phil
ip Barton Key and when the civil
war was a-brewing. Indeed, there Is
tradition that Felix in his boyhood
swan with the ichthyosaurus, rode the
mastodon and played pranks with the
megatherium. 1t is not cocksure that
he was not at the burning of Troy, the
sacking Of Rome by the barbarians
and the storming Of Constantinople by
the Turks. Forever young, perpetually
happy, as BELTS his name, he has re-
turned to us as one risen from the
grave. What he was in the beginning
he is now and will be till the curtain is
rung down on his career, a politician
from skin to core, Democrat in whose
simple breast hope springs eternal.
Others may grow respondent or rat to
the Republicans, but Felix Is true as
steel or rs the sun in his arising. Con-
sequently no sooner had he landed in
Washington than he delivered himself
thusly: II am for any man who can
win the fight, but privately I do not
believe the nominee will be any one
Of whom Mr.. Bryan does not approve.
One thing is sure-New York state will
60 Democratic in 1904" Now, that's
the stuff, and hot stuff at that. May
Felix live forever!
An Interesting Book.
At high noon March 4 Hon. Galusha
A. Grow of Pennsylvania closed q con-
gressional career which began at high
noon March 4. 1851, fifty-two years in
tervening betwixt the commencement
and end. This is the longest parlia-
mentary career on record in America.
MI. Grow was not continuously in the
house. He was first elected in 1850,
the year memorable for the death of
John @. Calhoun and Daniel Webster's
1th OF March speech in favor of the
compromises of the constitution in gen.
eral and Of the fugitive slave law in
particular. Mr.. Grow was elected
three times as Democrat, then three
times as Republican and was defeat
60 in 1862. During the last Of these
terms ne was speaker, and his portrait
done In oil adorns the wall of the
sneakers lobby-his portrait as he
looks now and not as he looked whan