The Savannah morning news., 1903-12-20

presentiment remained with him, he
walked like a sensible man upon the
sidewalk"
I'm glad to hear you say that" said
MIR. Pedagog. Il always do that, for,
unlike your friend, Mr.. Swallerbox, l
have never yielded to my fears sut-
hciently to try to escape them through
greater dangers
Good" said the Idiot. "Your case
is not so extreme as was that of Swal-
lerbox, which is a point in your favor.
Well, SwallerbOX came back to the
sidewalk. Experience had taught him
that premonition was one thing, but
that the conscious seeking of danger
was another AS between signs and
trolley cars, he had learned that the
latter had been proved by human ex-
perience to be inevitably the more
dangerous, whatever his nervous sys-
tenn prompted him to avoid. But now
whenever he espied a sign he kept his
eye on it. If it seemed ricketty he
turned aside to avoid it, but his eau
ton proved his downfall. one morn
ing he left his apartment up town to
go to his office on the street, and his
premonition was so strongly upon him
that he made up his mind the thing he
most feared was due to happen that
very day. To-day is the appointed
his home. No matter by what means
seek my office, the sign will fall He
went so far that morning as to make
his WILL in which he left his debts to
the Metropolitan Museum of Art, and
whatever was left to his roommate,
Virgins, and then he set out"
And no sign fell upon him all the
way down." interrupted the Biblio-
maniac II know the kind of story
you're going to tell"
mo, you don't" said the Idiot. at
is true that no sign fell from the be-
ginning to the end of his walk, but
what did happen was that while keep
ing his eye peeled for loose signs he
overlooked a great yawning coal hole
beneath his feet. The result was that
Swallerbox fell through the chute into
bin below the sidewalk, just in time
to receive a couple of tons of pea coal,
which was in process of delivery as he
disappeared, in the small of his back.
1t took one hour for him to get out,
for in spite of his yells for help, no
body was aware of his presence below
until the janitor came to see IL the
bins were full. Meanwhile Swallerbox
had had about eight more tons of
gTanulated anthracite poured over
him. and when discovered was the
living picture of a badly used up
stoker of African descent. I don't be-
lieve he has got the coal dust out of
his system yet. So you see, Mr.. Peda-
cog, that that presentment, while the
thing itself may never come true, for
what it involves along other lines is
one of the most dangerous in exist
ence."
And was Swallerbox ever cured of
this nervous apprehension? ?" asked Mr..
Pedagog.
NO" said the Idiot. but he's got
it under control. Finding himself un-
able to get rid of, he determined to
make the best OF 1t and now it has be-
come one of the great pleasures of his
life. He goes about seeking signs to
fall on him, When he heard that the
windiest corner in New York was down
by the Flatiron building, he deliberate
ly went down there and stood until he
saw there were no signs on the block
to blow on him. Then, disappointed. he
went across to the other side of Broad
way, or Fifth avenue, and whenever
a sign really was blown off a building,
he would try to get under it, but with
out success. The nearest he came to
being hit was when one passed within
three feet of him one day last March.
He butted it with his head as it came
down, but he didn't consider that that
counts as a fulflllment, because it was
he and not the sign that did the bust
ness. Lately he has taken up sign
chasing just as a good many people
so in for golf or fox hunting. When
ever he has a holiday he starts out
early in the morning looking for one
to fall on him."
He must be crazy" calculated Mr..
Brief.
''No-he enjoys the sport of it just
as Mr.. Bib, here enjoys the chase for
a rare first edition of tho Maui
City Directory, or some other choice
bit of literary property" said the Idiot
But there is no physical danger in
book-hunting," alleged the Biblioman-
lac. Il should be a fool to endanger
my head for the sake of my fad"
"Swallerbox has arranged all that"
said the Idiot. HE is prepared for
any emergency. In the first place, he
has practiced being hit by a sign in
his room. He has a huge board sus-
pended from the ceiling by a length
CT clothesline. By touching a spring
the board is made to fall, and, by long
practice, Swallerbox has got so that
he can catch it on his shoulders, on
the back of his neck or on the crown
of his head. without hurting himself
a bit. You see he has made a game
OF 1t and has become not only an ex-
pert but real enthusiast on the sub
ject."
"Bosh," said the Lawyer. Some day
when real sign falls on him all his
science won't save his Uranium. One
good crack will give him his quietus,
however expert he may be-"
"Nope-you're wrong" said the Idiot.
For he is all ready for it. Whenever
he goes out he wears a football head
guard, so you see"
1--WE see what you are coming to.
Mr.. Pedagog," laughed the Doctor, If
you follow the Swallerbox method"
II should not choose it, must say"
smiled the Schoolmaster, 'if there were
an alternative"
There is said the Doctor. "a lit
tie less pumpkin pie and a little more
pepsin will cure you of any PRESENT.
ment you may have. These numerous
apprehensions and terrible dreams are
the result of bad digestion. You don't
need to go sign-chasing, but to take
better care of your stomach"
There was a pause for moment,
and the Idiot rose to leave.
Say, Doctor" he said as he reached
the door. II wish you'd give me one
of those pepsin prescriptions for ner-
vous presentiments. 1 have a terri
BILE one of my own this morning, and
want it cured"
well, / don't know whether one of
your Authorizations will respond to
normal treatment" said the Doctor.
What is your presentment?"
That on the first OF the month, I'll
find my letter box full of bills" said
the Idiot. 1T keeps me awake nights"
Thar - rapiipd the nnctOr ho-