davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Forrest City times., 1903-01-16

Daushser--I don't want 10 raarr7
just get ia rather sta. al school
Mother Yon must remember.
dear. men do not wish clever wives.
Daughfer-Dut all men are not ike
papa.-Chicago Daily News.
The Forrest City times., 1903-01-16
Sizing Up the situation.

New Servant CATER lady has shown
here the work 10 be donel-I see you
want a sort Of a neral girl.
Lady-Nhx 50?
sertant-W Well, any,vav. one that
amt too particular BROOKLYN Life.
The Forrest City times., 1903-01-16
Pretty Near Trus

1T Is when young man is in love"
remarked the Observer Of Events an6
Thing, that he hasn't q single idea
in his head. e-Yonkerg statesman
The Forrest City times., 1903-01-16

Sc "a. c.1zs II Is ass z1bss
Are he gave her k.s.-
A. RAJ vsrg LzZs1t & rex struck ths
vice
zz rszoeT tsz1 fuv
-EsMlzt4 pa Pres
Omaha daily bee., 1903-03-22
Origin of Modern Joke

at is we'll known among joke writer's"
said the antiquary, that there exists in
the world only seven jokes. All the rest
have been made, and still continue to be
made, from these seven. But il is not so
we'll known that there are only seven
anecdotes. out Of which, by ingenious
blendings and twistings, the unnumbered
thousands OF the worlds anecdotes are
created.
Il am an amateur or loving collector of
anecdotes. When l come upon one that
is strange to mt delight TO trace it back
to its source. I get the same pleasure out
of this that an etymologist gets in tracing
back to its Sanskrit root a disputed word.
Some time ago l heard of an anecdote
about Charles Lamb. Lamb, the story
went, was on a journey and the time was
that Of the publication of the ingenious
stories for children that he and his sister,
Mary, had written in collaboration. Lamb
said to one of his fellow travellers;
Have you read Lambs tales?'
mo, but l have a black sheepskin rug
the other replied.
This anecdO,e struck me as pretty good
and ! tried to trace it back. For a long
tim was unsuccessful, but last week my
search was rewarded; I found the story
from which the Lamb was derived.
1T was a story OF a traveller on a rainy
day who had left his wrap In a stage
coach, After he had gotten out he missed
the wrap and told the driver to 90 inside
and inquire for 1t. The guard, putting his
head within the door, called:
is there a black macintosh here?'
mo was the reply, but there are two
red McGregors.' "-Philadelphia Record.
Omaha daily bee., 1903-03-22

.
The presence OF the Iowa School for the
Deaf at Council BLUFFS and the Nebraska
Deaf and Dumb Institute at Omaha in a
large measure accounts for the great num-
Der Of mutes who have their homes at
Omaha. These people have found their
way into many avenues of useful occupa-
ton. and hnd little ciniculty in transaeting
such business or pursuing such vacations
as are not absolutely barred to them by
reason OF their physical deficiency. They
extract a great deal of pleasure from life,
not a little being deriN ed through the eX-
istence OF clubs to which the deaf mutes
alone are admitted. In this way they are
relieved OF the restraint that might come
from association with people who would
not understand their situation. and so are
allowed a greater freedom in their social
intercourse. One of these organizations in
which omaha and Council Bluffs share
Jointly Is the Friday Night club, whose
members are all. with one exception, deaf
the exception is the hearing wife OF one of
the gentlemen. There are twenty members
and all but one are connected in one way
or another with the faculties of the schools
for the deaf in Omaha and Council Bluffs
Nowhsre else in the country are two state
schools for the deaf so near as TO make
such an organization possible, and this
makes II the only one of it's kind In the
world. The object OF the club is social and
Il meets every other Friday, alternately, in
Omaha and Council Bluffs at the homes of
its members. Al their gatherings the buzz
Of conversation is nOtieeably absent, but
by means of the rapid finger spelling and
the expressive gestures Of the sign Ian
guage the feast OF reason and flow OF SOUL
is Just as much enjoyed. Musicales, of
course, are not on the program and the
piano is conspicuous by it's absence but
Omaha daily bee., 1903-03-22

otherwise all the conventional amusements
Prof. +. C. Holloway and the secretary
Prof. J. Schuyler Long. OF Council Bluffs,
and Prof. Waldo H. Rothert of Omaha Is
treasurer. The members are Messrs. and
Mesdames Waldo II. Rothert, Charles e.
Comp, Lawrence James, Messrs. Louis Di-
vine and Lloyd Blankenship and Miss Craw-
ford, Of Omaha; Aessrs. and Mesdames J.
Schuyler Long, Frank C. Holloway. J. W.
Barrett, Zach b. Thompson, Lester Pound
and Miss ~GOhlinghOrst, Of Council Blufs.
The club was entertained last Saturday
night by Superintendent Stewart and the
matron, Miss Johnson, at the school for the
Deaf on North Forty-hfth street, where the
accompanying iashlight view was taken.
Rev. c. p. Hackney and wife Of Ashland,
Neb., were married on September IA. 1886,
sixty six years ago. Father Hackney, as
he is called in his community, was born
August II, 1914. in Friedrich county, Mary
land, near Harpers Ferry. At the age of %
he emigrated to Ohio and settled at Deayer-
tOWn and vas there married to Mary
Lurge, who was born near Trenton, n. j.,
October II, 1919, and came to Deavertown
in 1924. Father Hackney was ordained to
the ministry in the Methodist Episcopal
church in 1852, and oficiated as such at
different points in Wisconsin until 1873
when he came to Nebraska and, settled
near Waverly. in Lancaster county. In
1880 lie moved to Ashland and has resided
there ever since. He Joined the Masonic
lodge at McConnelville, O., in 1916. He
has been a member OF eleven different
Masonic lodges In the hfty-seven years OF
his Masonic life and has served as chap
lain in every lodge OF which he has been
a member. He now holds this office in
Pomegranite lodge No, 1l0 in Ashland, and
although past SIS years Of Cge, frequently
attends lodge meetings. He has o~ficiated
as chaplain for the Ashland High school
at the commencement exercises for four
teen consecutive years and has been chap
Omaha daily bee., 1903-03-22

lain OF the Grand Army of the Republic
for twenty years. He is at present and
has been for a number Of years city mis-
sionary Of Ashland and is very efficient in
relieving the INDECENT.
Omaha daily bee., 1903-03-22

Ruth Rebekah lodge OF Omaha gave a de-
Iightful entertainment at It's lodge room
last Saturday night, one Of the features Of
which was a dairymaids' convention. A
bevy Of the pretty members of the order,
clothed in conventional dairymaid costume
Omaha daily bee., 1903-03-22

Hght Photo by a SIAN AfIIsI.
and equipped with milkpail and stool,
formed a body that added much to the
pleasure Of the evening, and allowed The
Bees stan photogI apher to make one OF
his best fashlight photographs.
Omaha daily bee., 1903-03-22

TO attain the rank OF brtgadier general III
tho regular army OF the United States, and
the second to command the Department OF
the Missouri. II predictions now freely
made are confirmed, by the time he reaches
Omaha he will be the second of his name
TO become major general, for 1t is said that
he is to be made a major general in july
and no will probably not reach Omaha be-
fore August.
Omaha daily bee., 1903-03-22
Pen and Picture Pointers

@RIGADIER GENERAL SAMUEL S.
~ SUMNER, who will command the
- Department of the Missouri upon
@1H his return from the Philippines,
is the third member Of his family
The Minneapolis journal., 1903-04-22
HOW TO TREAT A SEVERE CUT


Some most excellent advice is given By an
ambulance expert in an article in Pearson's
Magazine entitled "In Case of an Accident as
to what to do in case of an emergency while
waiting for physician The following sugges.
tion in regard to the treatment Of cuts Is very
practical and should be read with care. Cuts
need the yery prnmptest attentions
Pressure Is the only remedy for bleeding,
pressure being between the wound and the
Heart
It is important to know IL the blood is flowing
from artery or from vein,, for II the former
is the case, It is "a matter of life and death
to act promptly and efficiently. Blood from an
artery is tight red cc1pr, and comes in jerks;
from a vein it Is dark purple and simply oozes
quietly forth.
Fingers first" is the golden rule when ar
artery Is cut, and with fingers and thumbs the
flow between the wound and the heart must be
absolutely stopped. Then a tourniquet must be
applied, an arrangement, consisting first OF q
pad to press on the artery, a bandage over the
pad, and some means, such an stick, witt
which the bandages may be twisted up 30 tightly
that the artery lis firmly compressed.
A piece Of cork, fiat stone, anything hard
will serve as a pad in emergency, and for
bandage q handkerchief, a belt, a tie--almos
anyt thing will do Looping the ends of the band
age outside che knot, a stick is passed through
the loop and twisted round and round, Just suff
cicntly to stop the bleeding, not whit more.
The Minneapolis journal., 1903-04-22
VANDERBILT WEDDING IS A GO
Report That Willie Is to Wed Mrs.
Rutherfurd Is Confirmed. T.

London. April 22-The engagement Of
Mrs. Lewis. M. Rutherford to William K.
Vanderbilt Is confirmed. It is not known
whether the wedding will take place here
or in Paris, but it will not be held at the
United States embassy here or at>the Lon
don residence Of, Secretary White, Mrs.
Rutherford's brother-in - 1890 -
Hartman Says It's So. r
: New. York, April s22.-Olivers Hartman,
brother Of Mrs. Lewis M. Rutherford, to-
day confirmed the. report that his sister
is to be married to w. X Vanderbilt.
The ceremony, Mr.. Hartman said will
take place April 20, and probably at the
home Of Henry White, secretary Of the
American embassy in London.
s Why 1t Was Denied.
Paris, April 22.Intimate friends Of Will
liam K. Vanderbilt and Mrs. Lewis M.
Rutherford accept the authoritative state
ment from London Of their approaching
marriage as confirmatory of what they
have believed for some time. The diff
Guilty has been that both the parties i'm
mediately concerned have continually de-
MED that their marriage was to take
place. These denials have apparently
been due to legal impediments dispelled by
New York court proceedings of Monday.
Mr.: Vanderbilt was present at a small
dinner party Sunday night, and when the
question of his engagem ent was broached
he professed to be in entire ignorance OF
the matter. {tzsss
The Minneapolis journal., 1903-04-22
A New Combination.

A revolution in the treatment OF ex-:
ternal aches and pains.
For years camphor has been used
and considered almost a necessity in
every home, for the relief of minor in
juries such as Neuralgia, Sore Muscles,
Aches and Pains. Recently an ingen-
ious Chemist has succeeded in com
bining camphor, with certain cooling,
soothing, healing oils and, anti-septic
drugs, into perfect relieving and heal
ing agent. This new discovery is at
tracting much attention among medi-
cal men and is sold by all good drug
gists under the name Of Paracamph. It
is rapidly becoming preferred by all
classes Of people, owing to its remark
able powers of quickly relieving Sore
Muscles, Muscular Rheumatism, Neu-
ralgia, Bruises, Swellings, Irritations of
the Skin. Itching Piles, Ring worm,
letter, Eczema, and all forms of In
Examinations. Prominent physicians
claim that Paracamph is sofar superior
to the old fashioned salves. ointments
and liniments, that they are using same
regularly and advise the keeping Of
this valuable remedy in every home.
PARACAMPH is neither liquid
Inor is it strictly speaking, a solid but
may be termed a ''soft solid," which
readily dissolves into liquid at tenn
perature little above the normal heat
of the body. Being easily absorbed by
the skin, it stimulates the Glandular
structures Of the skin, penetrates to the
source Of the ailment, soothes the nerve
centers, removes all soreness, thereby
giving instant relief and quickly cur
Ing by drawing out the fever and In
fammation by reducing copious sweat
ling.
This valuable remedy is sold by all
good druggists under a positive guar
antee to give perfect satisfaction Of
money refunded. So whom you call fol
|Paracamph, be sure that you get 1t
There is nothing just as good. After
you have. given same a thorough trial
il you do not feel that you are benefit.
led, your money will be returned to you
without any argument.
Sold only in 25c, SOC and $1.O0 bottles
by all good druggists.
The Minneapolis journal., 1903-04-22
UNDER WAY ATLAST
First of the Barr British Colony
Transports Set Out From
~ Saskatoon.
Funds Are Low and There Is Gen.
eral Complaint-Three Leave
. - for England.

to The Journal.

Special to The Journal. t--.. p. ....5 = .
winnipeg, Man., April a2.-The grand
trek Of the Barr colonists commenced
from Saskatoon yesterday. Twenty-Five
transports left at o'clock and within
forty rods of the camp the first of them
stuck in a muskeg and extras had to be
attached to drag it out. A large party
will leave to-day, probably forty wagon
loads. ,.s-= f>-.,. = >4-..% :,->.~ -@* .-
These are hustled out by the govern
ment officials, who are heartily tired OF
Bars dilatory methods. If they had not
taken hold the start would not have been
made to-day. Many are getting restless
because Of the delay. Their funds are
low, and they are beginning to realize
the seriousness of the problem ahead OF
them. In fact, all that Is needed for open
revolt is a leader. Not single good word
for Barr is to be heard. All the colonists
seem most anxious to finish their journey
and get to work. ~
! Colonization Agent Speers said last
night: 'Lack Of motive is causing all the
| trouble So many useless scrubs have
| been palmed off on the colonfsts that they
are in a. hole.
| Good cattle are hard to get Fifty
more teams arrived from Battleford,
Batoche and Duck Lake and were hired
| to carry goods at $3.50 a hundred. The
owners of the last named teams have
| agreed to break 5000 acres for Barr at So
an acre.
,Barr's agents have been among the
colqnists asking them to pay a dollar a
month each for special instructions in
farming, but Speers and his men openly
advised them against any such thing.
What does a maritime province man
know about western farming?'' said
Speers to-day.
! Three dissatisfied colonists started east
ward to-day booked for England. A hun
| dred stragglers have arrived and. all tho
government officials are now on the
ground.
The Minneapolis journal., 1903-04-22

CANTON, s. d. Thomas Parks, aged
10, Is dead as the result. of being run down
BY Sioux Falls Canton train
The Minneapolis journal., 1903-04-22

SALEM, S. D.-Elmer Barnhart has
sold his livery to Peter Anderson Of
Waukon, Iowa, for $4.000.-Mr Marsha,
who had piece Of wire staple fly in his
eye. had the ball removed at Sioux Falls
and is very low.
The Minneapolis journal., 1903-04-22

IOWA. FALLS, ioWA-Iowa Falls will
not have Company III Of the Iowa nat
ional guard as has been planned. The
membership was secured and all the de-
tails made for mastering in when the adj
ditional requirement was made Of a $4,000
armory. Persons in charge were unable
to secure the necessary funds.
The Minneapolis journal., 1903-04-22

pEADWoOD, s. D.--A majority of the
col1ncilmen express themselves favorably
on the proposition of accepting the in
crease offered by Andrew Carnegie to his
original donation for public library. Mr..
Carnegie first offered $4,000, but has
Increased it to SIS; 1000.
The Minneapolis journal., 1903-04-22

Is HARLAN, IoWA.-The southbound
branch passenger train on the Carroll di-
vision OF the Chicago & North Western
road was wrecked near here. Conductor
Grady and Mrs. Gladstone, both Of Car
roll, we're seriously injured. The accident
was caused by a broken aange.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1903-06-27

the Eastern Branch is not mere than q
foot a foot and a half and would not
create sufficient current to carry off the
offensive matter brought down by the sew
ers in time to prevent its making the
neighborhood of the plant an extremely
disagreeable and unhealthy place to live
or wo::-.
The building that will contain the pump
ing plant is to be highly ornamental. It
will be constructed of brick and stone with
terra Gotta trimmings. The plans call for a
handsome structure which will be in keep
ing with the modern style of architecture
thas has been adopted by the District The
interior will be finished with glazed brick
and ornamental iron work, srills and fiuted
columns being included in the general plan
of decoration. The main sewers of the
District will run directly through the build
Ing the contents Of the lesser sewers hav-
ing been emptied into the larger recepta-
cles before they reach the pumping plant
The foundation of the building will be of
concrete and II will be SO arranged that
there will be slip formed for the landing
of boats
A temporary pumping plant has already
been erected but this is only ii small af
fair. though 1t is believed ii will serve the
purposes until the new building is COM
pleted. Tie contractors have promised to
turn the new pumping station over to the
District July ], 1904.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1903-06-27
NEW PUMPING PLANT
signed for Disposing Of
District Sewage.
COST OF THE SYSTEM
INVOLVES EXPENDITURE OF
HALF A MILLION DOLLARS.
Novel Methods of Construction to Be
Employed-New Building Will
Be Highly Ornamental

In one of the most obscure and inaccass-
able corners of Washington as such
things are judged nowadays, one of the
largest and most extensive buildings for
the District government is being erected at
cost of more than half a million dollars
The building is located at the foot Of New
Jersey avenue southeast and is to contain
the apparatus of the sewage pumping plant.
The contract for its construction which is
held by Ambrose B. Stannard of New York,
is the largest contract that has ever been
let by the District authorities. The plans
for the building and the space 1t is to cover
will open the eyes Of the average citizen as
to the manner in which the business of dis
posing of the Accommodations of filth in the
District is to be carried on. There Is an
other object lesson in modern enterprise to
be learned from a visit to the site Of the
pumping plant. Few citizens know Of the
comprehensive manner in which the great
engineering concerns known as structural
companies go about their work and the
operations of the company which has in
charge the erection of this building will
give all who desire to become acquainted
with these methods an excellent opportun-
ity to observe them in their best light
So far nothing has been done toward the
actual building Of the pumping plant, but
the manager of the construction company
has in his office a statement as to exactly
what will go into the building. He can tel
you at a moments notice how much NOR
tar, how many bricks, how much stone
how much lumber, how many nails even.
will be used in the construction. The work
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1903-06-27

that engages the attention of the builders
at present lies wholly in making. the ex.
oavations and building the foundations the
work of which is being carried on by the
Crawford Paving Company of this city, wh1
are the .subcontractors under Mr.. Stannard
There are more than fifty thousand cubic
yards of earth to be removed from the site
Of this building.
The "orange Peel' Dredge.
To the citizen who is accustomed tc
watching building operations in the hear,
of the city where the excavations are made
by means of a pick shovel and an active
mule. spurred on by q negro workman, the
methods pursued by the modern builders u
great structures that call forth not only the
efforts Of the skilled carpenter, bricklay e-,
stone mason and iron worker, but the cal
culatfons of the trained engineer and the
close consideration of the Inerest details
will appear a somewhat radical departure
from the old methods
No men are employed in the actual dig
ging of the foundations of the new sewage
pumping station. The earth is being re-
moved with the aid of machine called an
orange peel dredge, operated by powerful
steam engine. This machine does the work
of ten men. The operating mechanism is a
steam engine. two heavy derricks, a
couple hundred feet OF steel cable and the
orange peew itself. This machine is
shaped exactly like an orange would be II
cut In quarters. 1t holds one cubic yard
of earth. The bowl of the peel is divided
into four parts, which are operated by
heavy hinges on the upper edge so that
when the peel Is sprung the sides fan
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1903-06-27
ANIMAL FRIENDSHIPS
Queer Cases Of Attachments Formed IN
Large Zoos.

from T1t-Bits.
Among the strange features of life in a
large zoo are the unexpected, and. at times
amusing friendships that spring up between
animals OF altogether dissimilar habits and
natures. Out at the National Zoo fwo
Rhesus monkeys have formed warm
friendship for a large Belgium hare bu+
this Is not so surprising as some Of the
Platonic loves that have been noted else
where Some years ago the botanical gar
dens at Rio de Janeiro, the capital Of
Brazil, kept large manatee In a pond IN
the grounds. 1t was an immense creature.
ana, In time. became so tame that ii would
come to the waters edge and eat erase o,'t
or the hands of the visitors This levia
than formed an attachment for an Euro
pean swan. Kept on the lake. and followed
II ABOUT as though the swan were its guar
dian, so that wherever the swan hannenad
to be one had only to look in the cIear
water by its side to see the lazy manatee
hoating about and feeding on the water
this out. and by coaxing the swan To the
edge OF the lake they were ALWAYS srre Of
the manatees following When the swan
left the water. the manatee was discomfort
ed ana restless until 1t returned AS for
the swan. 1t grew so accustomed to tho
big animal. that 1t had no fear when the
manatee rose by its side to take air and
so the two got along famously
Mr.. Afialo in his description of the nr;
vate menageries of England saws that
such attachments come about often In the
big animal parks of Great Britain. At one
or them. Leonardslee, he saw a Sambur
deer and Welsh pony that were great
chums AT present one of the pair of hin
popotami in the London zoo has grown
very fond OF an ordinary black house cal
that enters and leaves the quarters of the
| big brute at will. In another private ma
nagerfe in England Mr.. Aflalo saw two era Y
wolves that were hand in glove" witt
| an European bear. Sometimes the hear
I would get tired Of the incessant, boisterous
| play of the wolves. in which event he
would climb tree and lie down to sleep
| In the forks of some branches, leaving his
companions to howl over his absence below
Sir Harry Johnston. the discoverer of the
| Okapi, In his recent work on Uganda de-
| scribes how, for q time he undertook the
tanning and domestication of q number of
| wild animals of that country, an expert.
1 ment in which he was partly successful
Among the animals which he had at his
geological experiment station was a baby
| elephant and young zebra that became
! great cronies. The little elephant had q
way of twining its trunk in loving embrace
around the neck of the zebra, and although
the latter was usually very affectionate
toward the little elephant. there were other
| times when 1t became bored and tired OF
constant attentions and demonstrations OF
| love. and nipped the little elephant with
its sharp teeth, right spitefully causing
the little fellow to squeal under the pinch