The Savannah morning news., 1903-02-22

'Is tn race dyin' out?" asked Mr..
Dooley.
rs it what?" replied Mr. Hennessy.
us it dyin' out" said Mr. Dooley.
9Th ministers an me frind Dock Eliot
iv Harvard say it is. Dock Eliot wud
know different if he was a rale dock an
wint flynn up Halsted sthreet in a
buggy, f1oggin' a white horse to be
there on time. But he amt, an he's
sure it's dyin' out. Childer ARE dis
appearin' firm America. He took Il
squirt at tn list iv Harvard graduates
tn other day an discovered that they
had ivrything to make home happy but
kids. Wanst tn wurruld was full iv
little Harvards. TIL country swarm
ed with thin. Ye cud tell a Harvard
man at Wanst be a look at his feet.
He had tn unmistakeable cradle fut.
1t was no sthrange thing to see an OF
Harvard man comm back to his almy
mather pushin' baby carredge full iV
twins an ladin' a family that looked
like an ADVERTISEMENT in tn newspapers
to show tn PERCENTAGE Nv purity iv bak-
in powders. President Eliot was CT
ten disturbed in discoorse, pintin' out
tn dangers iv tn country be tn out
cries iv TIN progeny iv fair Harvard.
TIL campus was full iv baby carredges
on commincemint day, an SPECIAL ac-
compilations had to be took FIR nurses
In thin happy days SomeWan was al
ways teethin' a Harvard family. 1t
looked as if ivincholly tn wurruld wud
be peopled with Harvard men an tn
Chinese mud have to pass an Exclusion
Aaf FIf h H., l..
Harvard. She is projoocin' no little
rah-rahs to glad TIL wurruld. TIL av'-
rage family iv tn Harvard graduate an
tn jackaSs is practically tn same TIL
Harvard man iv tn prisint day is tn
last iv his race. No artless prattle is
heerd in his home. Not FIR him tn joys
~ trundlin' tn little push-cart
reach FIR tn soothin' syrup in
tn darkened room. Whin Harvard
needs a fresh batch iv scholars an
quarther backs she has to call FIR a
new deal. An me frind Prisidint Eliot
is sore about it an he has commune
Gated tn sad fact to tn clargy. Nav
thin tn clargy likes so much as a
sad fact. Lave wan iv me frinds iv tn
clargy know that we're goin' to tn
divvle in a new way an he's happy.
We used to take tn journey be covet-
disobeyin' our parents, but now we
have no parents to disobey or they
have no childher to disobey thin. TIL
American people is becomin' as I'M
fruitful as an ash heap. We're no bet
Their thin tn Fr-rinch. They say tn
pleasin' squawk iv @an infant hasn't
been heerd in France since tn Franco
Prooshun war. TIL govermint offers
prizes FIR families but no wan claims
thin. A Frinch gintleman who whit to
Germany Wanst has made a good deal
iV money lecturin' on Wild Babies l
have Met but ivrywan says he's a
faker. Ye can't convince annywan in
France that there ar-re amy babies
We're gOin' tn same way. Less thin
100000 babies was BORN in this coun-
thry las year Think iv it, Hinnissy-
less thin 100000, hardly enough to
consume wan-tenth Nv tn output iv
pins! It's a horrible thought. 1 don't
blame ivry wan, firm Tiddy Rosenfelt
down, FIR worryin' about it.
What's tn cause, says ye? I don't
know. I've been readin' tn newspa-
pers, an ivrybody's been tellin' why.
Late marredges, arly marredges, no
uries iv tn day, tn tariff, tn thrusts,
tn spots on tn sun, tn difficulty iv
obtainin' implyemint, TIL growth iv Gull
ture, tn pitcher hat, an so on. Ivry-
body's got raison, but none iv thin
seems to meet tn bill. I've been look
in at tn argymints pro an con, an
/ come to tn conclusion that TIL race
is dyin' out on'y in spots. It's dyn'
out among Harvard graduates, but it's
holdin' it's own among tn alumnuses
iV Saint Pathrick's COMMERCIAL Acad-