The daily morning Alaskan., 1903-11-13
CHANGE OF
 PROGRAMME


 for two years, be married Sarah Ann Bridges. a spinster of thirty-siX. Sarah Ann had been a friend of the deceased wife for several years and when Mrs Perkins was told that her days were numbered she called the deacon to her bedside anC said.
 "Abner. you win mourn for me, but you will ge married again in a couple Of years. Youu need somebody to wash and mend and bake and keep things going. Sarah Ann Bridges ia good tempered. a good housekecpor and hard worker. and I'd rather you would marry her than any one ! know. %
 The deacon jottod down the initials of Miss Bridges name on his memory, and iu due time called upon her and made her his wife He was glad Sarah was glad. and no one had any criticisms tO make A hundred dider- ent people said they knew Smdh like a book. and that Che deacon couldn't have done better He thought SO too for three or four weeks. and then he began to doubt One morning the new wife suggested new window curtains for the parlor lou, the deacon turned Co his store book and proved Go her that the old curtains hadn't been mp but seven years. and tut they ought to do for seven years more. Itw0s the first time hc had crossed her. and Sa- rah flushed up, rolled her eyesa and then fell down In a it A doctor and three or four women worked over her for two hours and finally brought her back from the grave. and the purlor win dows bad new curtains tbe next day. That was where Deacon Perkins made bis mistake. but he did not realize it until later on Saruhs sudden Illness was supposed Co be due Go weak heart. but it is no great trick to fool a doctor once OF twice.
 Ten days had passed and the new wife was cleaning house. when a sew ing machine man came along He hadn't told ha.t his story when Sarah decided that she must have a machine. The deacon's first wife always had done her sewing by hand, and the hus. band himself had regarded a sewing machine as an invention of Satan. He promptly put bis foot down on the con- templated purchase. and Sarah as promptly fei. in a heap again. lt was long three hours before she was about the house again. and upon the advice of tbe doctor the deacon bought thc sewing machine.
 A month later. when sarah wanted new shoes and was put ofi, she fell over for the third time. On this occasion however. tbe doctors suspicious were aroused. and so were those of some ot tle women who had helped Co draw her back from the grave. It was de c-Iel to be 8 case of suI6s and nothing more dangerous. The doctor stated bis reHef Co Che deacon, and tle deacon agreed with him, but that didn't mean that Sarah Ann would go out of bust ness.
 The next dt she had lasted twenty four hours before tle doctor was called and Che next thirty-siN. and then Dea con Perkins realized chat he had prot lem to deal with. lt was evident tlat Sarah would lie right where she raT for a week unless something was done He went 70 the minister. Minis ters are not supposed to be posted or stocks and bonds and bricSyarls. bui most of them have had cNur.euc. with wives. He made a suggestion.
 Two eeks later that suggestion was put into practice. sarah Ann wanted 9 bell on the front door. but the deacon promptly replied that au callers could make themselves heard hy pounding on the door with ciub sarah feli down iu one of her usual its. and the deacon cried out that she was dead at last and rushed for certain ueichbors They came. together with the doctor The latter pronounced the woman dead. and thr women began preparing tae body for Its last resting place
 There were three Of them. and they had a good deal to say. They cougrat ulated the deacon with an their hearts on reglining bis freedom. and they llarr.eI him again Go Che Widow Lee The doctor advised that the cheapest kind Of a coffin should be purchased As the deacon bent over her he said hr shouldn't have much of funeral pro cessiou and wouldn't shed any more tears than be could possibly help.
 Sarah Ann slipped or the bed and made for the broom sitting on end in corner of the room. The deacon Jumped for the door. but received a couple of whacks before he could get out In the yard be was run twice around the heuhouse and into the kitchen before being brought to bay.
 "Sorah Ann, you are a dead won. anr' De exclaimed as be grabbed for the bro0mstick.
 "No; ] ain't either" she replied as she fought him or.
 "Go back and behave yourself anc dou'r dlsappoiut me again There hasn't been a funeral iu town for 0yer a year. and if you come Go fife this way no woman win lend you cup of sugar or a fatiron.
 Rut Sarah insisted that she was alive
 "But ] want you to understand % said the deacon. anxious to test the remedy. 'that I shan't git no new cane seat chairs for the parlor as you want ed me to-"
 For half a minute Sarah seemed on the point Of returning to her fits. but then she braced up against the feeling. and. selzing the rolling pin, she dashed it through the nearest window and eX- claimed.