Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1903-01-30

gssner there was never sucn a sarurnana
Of crime IN the history Of the human race
- the Republicans held in Missouri
A burnt child breads the IRE, and a
vcalded cat 10 afraid Of cold water.
Missouri will not go Republican In
fair contest until the people of that mag
nifcent commonwealth have lost the pow
Or of memory.
have never Wanted myself or been ex-
plotted by my friends rs q prophet of |
either the major or the minor variety. |
Disclaiming all powers of vaticination, I
shall draw some conclusions from the |
plain facts Of history. There Is an old i
saying. Flight the devil with fire" and
while I do not say that the gentleman |
from Ohio resembles Old Nick very much, |
though one OF my colleagues once said on |
the floor Of this house that he looked like |
Santa Claus and talked like Satan. pro-
pose to fight him with his arithmetical
plan here today. have never been held
UP to the community as a lightning call
culator, although I understand the multi |
plication table. Out In Ohio and even be- |
yond the ample confines Of that state my
friend bears the sobriquet Of "Old Fig.
gers"
Today happened to be standing down
In the hall by the postoffice. An old ems
ployee Of the house was talking to q
"tenderfoot. The general swept by In his
majesty, tenderly fondling his prophets
beard. and the old employee said to the
newcomer, There goes the stud bug Of
arithmetic"
Nothing to Change.
In reading and rereading that in cold
type there is nothing in 1t that / would
change. / took General Grosvenor
upon his own proposition, and what
ever my answer lacks In elegance 1t
makes up. for In emphasis, but the
Journal, in It's vain endeavor to make
point against me, wrencles the cat
and cold water proyerb from its set
ting, makes me out rufllan for using!
II and by innuendo declares that the
pemocrafs Of the house We're n lot of
fools for applamliH9s The way the
Journal quotes il ne . n aan gould guess
what was talking absHt. Quoted as
part of the paragraph where 1t belongs.
most people would say 1t was apropos
and that the reason l assigned why
Missouri will not so Republican is a,
good and unanswerable reason, and
that is precisely why the Journal at
tncks me unfairly.
Again, V sage that I said that Gen
erai GfosNen0r looks very much like
Old Nick, when, as a matter Of fact,
nv statement vas exactly e Tie con
tFa.y: 6.
, The Journal says tsllat I eaia that
''.---- AEs will dspble discount that 81
~. - eldest RaaR that eyer
Methuselah, liz 3AHdblte=
lived, before Missouri goes -.
an" said no such thing Au con-
traire, as the French would say, I de-
clared that General Grosvenor's age.
would double discount Methuselah.''
OF course a little thing like that does
not amount to nything when the great
Kansas City journal is endeayoring to,
put Democrat in the wrong.
The Journal seems to think 1t was
something awful for ME to shy, In
speaking OF General Grosvenor, He
is the hardest man to corner that r
ever clipped my eyes on Yet can
prove the absolute verify OF that state
ment by every man In the house.
It must be that the Journal expects
Democrat to use only rosewater I'm
fighting Republican notorious for
using yitriol. II SO, the Journal will
be grievously disappointed In its ex-;
pectations
Mr.. Wachter Of Maryland broke in
on my speech to refer to the differ
ences betwixt Democratic factions,
whereupon I replied, They are as near!
g.. rr