Weekly independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 1887-1914, 1903-03-27
HE A HI N
HId II to Fool Bs wife and Forgot
whore ID Was when He he
eanir sober.

themsclNVs considerably more than
half seas over is n phenomenon
of which there are innumcrabie
instances. \ certain Washington
citizen of more than fair aN-
cragc subriety afforded Il of the
instances only a couple of weeks ago,
relates the Star.
This man took an afternoon on
from his business and went out I"
the HrnninE races on the first DAY
of the final week of the meeting. l.
was his first visit to the track sine"
the beginning of the meeting. Mirac-
ulousiy enough, hr won some money
considerably more than 500. IL
was SO miraculous that he felt thai
he would never experience another
DAYS luck on earth If he failed {"
celebrate the extraordinary event.
So he celebrated. lie celebrated 50
cfTcctually hat when ne got HON"
along towards midnight Ito with
stand as best he could, of course. his
wifc'S rcpruachcs) he had only 500 u!
his winnings left.
After she had relieved herself NJ
the due and proper quota Of re-
prOnchcs necessary in tn" circum-
stances the mans wife went down
stairs tn close up the house for th"
night. Then the man. who was ia
just the shape hat "a man always
gets in" who unwisely celebrates.
" ,cloprd his f~oXiness. Unto him
self he reasoned:
In my right hand trousers pocket
I've got $Go pure velvet. All right.
| want to maintain my personally
conducted clutch ON that $50. I;wt I
cant maintain any Kind Of a clutcE
at all "n i, il | permit it to- remain
in my right hand trousers pocket.
III ~" sooner fall into the deep. rest
full sinmncr As "f a little chr-ild than
ny true and faithful wife viii pro.
'ccd 10 go through my clothing. -
icCurl"uce with her inVuriablr and
distinctive custom undo circuIu-
stances like those of the present.
She w.ll grab out the 500 and never
say Il word about it. and I'll have
forgotten about what | did with 1t
myself when wake up tn-mUrruw
morning aId she'll br IL u~ndi>putrd
possession II my 500 81 blow in III
hats ami buas and a whole lot of an
n"rrsSarw truck like that. VARY.
VARY we'll. I'll just fool her up u
few. I'll just take this little 500 wad
and place" the Snm" behind this cut"
little pirtur" ON the wall. 50. There's
provide against my forgetting wha'
has h"cumc Of that littlr 500. ! shall
proceed To max" a little mcmOrau.
dunn in my notebook. Nh, here's my
pencil. I'll just writ" Town here,
Dough j. behind the pir,urr.' and
when | see tina; entry in my littl,
notchuuE IN be JUS; 500 t"-thr gouI
and she'll H." fooled up quite a heap"
II" barely had iin- to get the
money behind the picture hanging on
the wall over the bed and 10 u:akc
the little entry in his uoichuok he
for" his wife. having closed mp The
house. entered tn" room and resumed
the rrpruaches. mentioning "A few
that shr had overlooked and r"mcu-
hcred Will" downstairs. Presently
he fell int" u sound slumbcr. H."
never fucw whether his wife wen;
through his clothiIg or not after he
fell asleep. bui b" consider. il high
~ iTii'bI DIf mat enc bll.
When ia" mnl woke up. shccpish
aud h"ug-d0g. tlr next morning, h."
Remembered tn" money II" had won
on the LAY hrfnr" at the track. but
there was - good dcal "fn blank after
he returned to the city from the
track. lie remembered not "a thin"
Of the >hu Gee hnd when Hr returned
home. lh" memory of having placed
il hrEiu'' -" picture did not abide
will !.r st all. When Ia" asked his
wife 80 % .i"wuStnir, and get him
a err ,.'rc he jumped up md
ven tnIonga his clothes in "A great
hwr,. 3 q '"uud 80 cents in change.
and u1 ling else. II" uskrd his wife
when g." returned upstairs how
much money he had when he re.
turned ii"mc, and she regarded him
with an aEgrirycd star" when she
told him that the sum total Of hi,
cash had been 80 cents ia silver.
"Wcll.' the man unused. as hc rodr
down town I" business in the car.
"if my true aud loving spouse didn'r
get what money ! had left Of that
winning then | must have spent 4
heap Town town last night. or clsr
] WA touched. It's ON" or the other.
However. wc'll forget it. I ought to
have 30 days in Jail. anyhow. for not,
keeping the dough ! got from those
b"nuknnkcrs; il hasn't been often Two
hit them in recent years, heaven
knows"
II was only two days 2 that, in
running over his notcboUk. hr cam,
upon hat queer scrawl. "Dough is
behind the picture" II rcrpIcxrd
him for u few minutes, and lac
S"rntchcd his head and gnZcd nt
aud wondered over IL. 'Th" hnndwri i.
ing was pretty rocky, and when hr
took that fnct into accouni the whole
thing came bnck To him. lie rcmcm.
hcrcd hnving put the 500 behind the
! picture.
When he went home that evening
the FIRST thing he did when his wifc
wasn't looking was to III nm tL,t
picture. The $50 wad fell with II
pleasant It'll" thud To the floor, .rbc
man walked down stairs and Tossed
it {" his wife.
There. my dear" he said. "i,
little extra money that ! pickcd un
in n dcnl. Better run down town ,n.
morrow and buy u little Junk In iii,
zen a n Ns a.. 4-I -.-HH