Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1903-10-16
WIT AND HUMoR OF THE IRISH.
Superficial Stupidity Accounts For
Pats Quaint Sayings.

Superficial Stupidity Accounts For
Pats Quaint Sayings.
Perhaps there is no humor quite like
that, Of the Irish. 1t Is spontaneous
quaint, droll, dry, crisp, cutting, and
there Is nearly always gleam Of mer-
ry white teeth in it, for the Irishman
jokes better when he is light-hearted
than when he has a twitching Of the
"sardonicus risus." His stories are set
to Horatian smile, and seldom does
the Juvenalistic (cf. journalistic)
scowl come over the expression OF
his wit to make the satire grim.
When Juvenal does oust Horace from
an Irishman's countenance 1t Is usually
no longer question Of wit and humor,
but of inquests. There Is one quality,
however that Irish wit is seldom with
out, and that Is q certain flighty incon-
sequence of ideas from which the Irish
bull" was bred. And what makes this
inconsequence Of thought the more
charming is the fact that one does not
always know whether it Is unconscious
or Intentional. Perhaps the reader
would like to decide which from the
following cynical view Of life given by
an Irish farmer to his son: you see,
my boy, a mans life naturally divides
itself into three distinct periods. The
first is that in which he Is plannin' and
conthrivin' all sorts Of villainy and
rascality; that is the period Of youth
and innocence. The second is that In
which he is putin into practice the
villainy and rascality he conthrived be-
fore: that Is the prime Of life, or the
flower of manhood. The third and last
period Is that in which he Is maxim
his soul and preparin' for another
world that is the period Of dotage."
And. again, the cynicism almost sue
ceeds in achieving unconsciousness In
the following closing remark Of an Irish
essay on courtship and marriage: But
lovers do have their quarrels some
times; and begorra, when they do, you
almost think they hated one another
like man and WIFE,"
It is possible that the well-known
Irish inconsequence of thought Is very
often responsible for the humor Of
many handmade bulls. 1t is quite pos
sible for wag to produce any num-
Der Of the most laughable sayings Of
this kind, and no doubt many Of the
bulls that failed to frighten Miss Maria
Edgeworth were made consciously
enough by the Irish in pursuance Of a
common form Of humor. For instance,
although some Of Boyle Roche's famous
bulls may have been unintentional,
even his well-known mixed metaphor
1t Is too much to suppose that every
Irishman who makes bull nowadays
does 1t by mere inconsequence. It
must have taken that Australian men,
ber Of parliament a long time to pre-
pare the following: Eye have shaved
all the wool off the goose that lays the
golden eggs until ye have pumped 1t
dry" and in the preparation Of 1t he
was only adopting recognized form
of Irish humor for the expression Of
his ideas.
Nevertheless, it is true that a kind
Of superficial stupidity, even in the
educated Irish, goes far to account for
much Of their quaint humor. An apt
ness Of speech and a versatility Of idea,
combined with this superficial stupid1-
ty, may lead their possessor into all
kinds Of laughable forms Of speech.
For instance, the Irishman who sWore
that there was las honest heart beat
ing beneath an Irish tunic as under
any Scottish kilt" had a ready gift Of
comparison, but was too stupid to no
tice whittier it was leading him. In
stances of this grotesque and laughaole
stupidity are numerous enough, and so
well-known that it Is necessary to Gull
them from the byways Of Hiberniana
in order to interest. 1t was a strong
strain of Irish blood in an American
council that made itself responsible for
the following absurd resolutions:
(1) Resolved by this council that we
build new JAIL
(2) Resolved that the new jail be
built out Of the materials of the old
Jail.
(3) Resolved that the old jail be used
until the new Jail Is finished.
Equally absurd are the remarks Of
learned Irishmen. A certain DR.. Bar
rett Of Trinity college. Dublin, was
great offender in this way. At dis
cussion Of the college board as to what
should be done with huge heap OF
rubbish In the college park, someone
suggested that a hole should be dug
and the rubbish buried. Barrett took
UP this idea and stuck to 1t. But" the
others demonstrated, what shall we do
with the stuff that comes out Of the
hole?" WELL" said Barrett, "dig an
other hole and bury It," There Is
something more than mere absurd stu
pidity in the following story OF this
same Barrett. One cold, snowy night,
a man, who lived about five miles from
the college, sent his son a young boy,
to the doctors for a book that he had
promised to lend him. When the boy
arrived he knocked at the door, and the
doctor came out to him. There was no
light in his library, and when he learn
ed what the boy wanted, he went in the
dark, and presently returned with
book in his hand. Now" he said, go
home to your father and tell him that
believe this Is the book he wants, for
think I can put my hand on almost
every book in my library; but If 1t isn't
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