The Savannah morning news., 1903-12-17

their removal by death would be the
best thing for themselves and the pub
lie. They might appear accompanied
by counsel with briefs for judicial
scrutiny.
Tsuggest that the Court of Suicide
consist Of five judges-a bachelor,
married man, a widower a divorced
man and a father of fifteen children.
This would give enough different
points of view to prevent bias. Upon
receiving satisfactory evidence that
the applicant is entitled to die by his
own hand, the court would grant a
suicide license, authorizing the holder
to take his own life legally and with
out prejudice at some designated place
and according to an approved meth
cd. The license should be good for
three months. 1t might has printed
on the back full and explicit instruc-
tions as to the easiest, safest, quickest
and surest manner of self-murder, with
the names of properly authorized sur
geonS and physicians who could be
appealed to for assistance.
The court should have on hand at all
times experts to explain to licenses
how many pounds of lead pipe are re-
quired to sink a body to the bottom of
the ocean, how long a rope is required
for successful drop how much car
without extreme torture, what is the
best soporific when the gas is turned
on, whether corrosive sublimate is as
expeditions. as a 44-calibre bullet
whether shot through the heart is
as eft1cacious as one in the brain, how
razor should be held so as to sever
the jugular, etc. For the sake of
such as have no conveniences at home
for committing suicide, the court
might construct an annex and equip
it with all the necessary accessories
charging a small fee for use.
The court might issue special licenses,
to come into operation only in case of
certain specific contingencies arising
In this circumstane the licensee
would be allowed to take his life where
ever he happened to be when the con-
tingency arrived, and would not be re-
quired to give notice of his intention.
Licenses of this character might be OPP
erative for six months.
The court might designate certain
spots for the self-departure of licensees,
a place in the East river, or in the old
Morris canal, Newtown creek, the Bat
terry or the Subway. In days of hon
orr men threw themselves from walls.
How much nicer to take a fall from
the top of a sky-scraper! But no mat
ter where or when, or whatever the
method, when the desired end is ac-
complished let the properly authorized
medical man be on the spot to examine
the body and make out the necessary
certificate to the effect that the deed
was legal and properly committed.
All are aware that suicide is on the
increase. The Roman general killed
himself when he lost a battle; the
American business man does so when
he has lost his fortune, or his woman.
Sometimes we kill. ourselves when in
bad health. or in the excess OF fool
ish passion for an unworthy object.
The Court of Suicide would act as a
deterrent force. 1t would reduce self
murders by so per cent. There would
be time for every person contemplat-
ing suicide to take a second or third
thought of the future: with the result
that there would be a change of heart
and no license would be sought. 1t
must be understood that all applicants
are to appear in person, which in 1t
self would discourage not a few.
There are other remedies for the sui
eide mania-calomel, exercise. hunting,
fishing, the opera, the drama, or an
agreeable woman. But the Court of
Suicide would curtail the work of the
coroner and prevent bluffing. 1t would
render accidents impossible. DisaD-
pointed Broker Y. would be unable to
burn his mouth with carbOlic acid, give
himself a flesh wound with a pistol,
slash himself in a harmless sort of way
with knife. or otherwise ~Tnutilate
himself without getting rid of his bur-
densome life. Good intentions would
be carried out neatly and according to
schedule. and the house would be left
In Ordar