Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1903-07-25
His Pitable Merry-Making.

Take the pitiable case of the average
London clerk mechanic earning So or
S. (, week. One of his great ambitions is
to have what he calls "a day at the seaside
at least once year
For weeks and months he looks forward
to this holiday. and saves up money for it
30 cents a week His wife gets some new
clothes for the children to wear on the
great occasion. and the children themselves
cut notchcs on the bedpost to mark the
slow passing of the days toward the glori-
date
when the day dawns. very likely it
is foggy or raining. but the family rush
off to the railway station. f1atterng them
selves it will be fine at the seaside. They
join an excursion as they call 1t. of per
haps a hundred thousand other people all
bound for seaside resort two hundred
miles away. There similar resorts with
in fifty. twenty or ten miles: but they would
never dream of going to one of those in
stead.
THE English cheap trippers.' as the
great army Of holiday makers Is called,
have one fixed idea-to go as far possible
over the railroad in one day at the cheap
est possible rate. Nothing else seems to
matter If they can only achieve that am
bition Our typical family may live within
ten miles of Scarborough. the best of the
English summer resorts, but they wouldn't
think of going there. The children would
feel that they had been swinded No. they
land to find a place infinitely inferior to
Scarborough in every way.
They struggle like wild beasts for seat
in the train with thousands of other holi-
day makers. If they don't get one, they
probably have to stand for five six
hours. If they do get one Their tenderest
corns are trampled upon by the unfortu-
nate people who are obliged to stand.
"Our typical clerk may be a quiet, decent
sort of man at ordinary times. but when
he blossoms out into a cheap tripp"r he
becomes savage Bengal tiger Be
fore the train has left the station he nagS
his wife scolds his children and quarrels
with two or three of his fellow passengers
- FoGr-anh -sixpcnce. return fare, h.
crumbs to the clerk in the book .ng office.
The papers said four bob. What are yer
Sivin' ne? | want the tickets for four
bob
"'You won't get them. retorts tn clerk.
stand aside ana make way for TIL, crowd
Gimme. the tickets shouts the merry
maker Barst yer. who Yer shown
of?'-thlS to an imnatient man next in In.
at the window. Now. then Mariah. Ma
riah! W here are them children? Why
don't YOU look after them stead of gapn
around at other people like stuck pig2
Jimmy. what are YOU doin? Suckin' toffee
again, Amt | told yer not to do that?
Mariah. you oughter know better than to
let i'm make a l:ttle beast of hisself
And so he RACES around the PLATFORM
finding fault with everything and every
body. until the whistle blows ningly.
ana he nufIIeS dDDdI u lHe tTtlH 10 ma
himself sandwiched between old
man who driaks gin out of stone bottle
all the way and somebody else's tofree
sucking infant.
ut is a miserable train journey, in dirty
little cars which American company
would hardly use for cattle trucks. Prob
ably it lasts until nearly noon. and unless
the family have brought some food with
them in 4 paper bag-a practice usually
considered low by the cheap tripper'
class-they have to starve. for they have NJ
chance to buy refreshments on the journey.
Anticipated Amusements.
'.When at last they get to the seaside
hot hungry dirty. tired and uncOmfOrt-
able. they Immediately make dash for the
beach-'the sands. they call ft-where all
the amusements center Amusements!
and the Englishman snorted with sheer
disgust. IT'S an insult to the world after
one has seen Coney Island or Atlantic City
or any of your other big American summer
resorts.
IF it happens to be public holiday. and
several excursions have come down. people
swarm on the beach like ants until there
is no room to move without treading on
somebody. Our clerk and his family push
their way through the crowd. munching
hot buns out of big paper bag and look
ing out for something new.
Something new. They have their choice
between the negro minstrels, the comic
singers the peripatetic phrenologist who
tells your bumps. the Punch and Judy
show. the cocoanut shying alley and trip
out to sea in what is sardonically called
public pleasure yacht with two hundred
other seasick landsmen. These are the
only amusements provided for perhaps
hundred Thousand people. No wonder the
Englishman spends a melancholy holiday"
The Englishman sighed sympathetically
over his countrymen's summer woes. then
went on:
1.-The negro MINISTRIES are the first attrac-