The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1903-07-15
BALK ON WORD OBEY
BRIDES GENERALLY OBJECT TO IT
IN THE MARRIAGE CEREMONY
Argue That Woman Is No Longer the
VassaI of Man-EpiscopaI Ministers
Take AS Determined a Stand That
the Word Should BE Retained.

An Eastern paper recently published
symposium regarding the word
obey in the marriage service, made
up of opinions from we'll know brides
elect and Episcopal clergymen. The
strong minded" women of course re-
pudiated the word and all of the brides
to-be announced decidedly that they
did not intend to have it used in the
ceremonies in which they were to par
ticipate. One young woman who was
shortly to be married said: Il Tilted
my first love because he had deep
seated idea that a woman owed abso-
lutte, unquestioning obedience to her
husband"
Another eXpreser herself as follows:
Everybody knows that women, as a
rule, do not obey their husbands. Obe-
dience implies difference in station. L
shall so conduct myself as to COM
mand the respect of my husband, and
no man who respects his wife will hui
initiate her with orders"
A very impetuous little woman said:
IL will obey nobody. 1 am of age. 1
am self-supporting l have Travelled.
read, studied, achieved success. Why
should 1 obey? l am marrying a hus-
would expect or demand obedience Of
his wife. No honest man would want
his bride to utter the word obey with
a mental reservation. Don't let us start
married life with a lie."
girl who takes herself more Sc
riously expressed the following opinion
of obedience to husbands: There is
something more or less servile about
oh ~,
will have none of it. The whole trend
of human affairs is towards equality.
When woman surrenders her right to
independent thought and action she
takes a step backwards. When at the
altar bride promises to obey her hus
band she discredits herself or deceives
him. Every word in my marriage VOW
will be a holy bond with me, and for
that reason I will have the word obey
eliminated.
Now it would be entirely superfluous
to comment on these opinions They
are sufficient in themselves to make our
grandmothers turn in their graves,
but it doesn't seem that the prospective
husbands are in the least worried about
this state of affairs. Many marry just
the same with their eyes wide open to
the fact that wives are no longer vas
sails, and there is every reason to be
Elieve that married life is happier to-
day, in general, than ever before. The
prevalence of divorce is no evidence to
the contrary. There were few divorces
in the olden times because the law did
not permit them, wives had no means
of supporting their children, and an ad-
2 verse public sentiment made their life
even more miserable htna an unworthy
husband was able to do.
The five Episcopal ministers who
were asked their opinions about cut
ting out the word obey, all declared
stoutly in favor of keeping the little
word, which means so much if taken
literally. But then they just as stoutly
Insist that habitual drunkenness, ex-
IRENE cruelty and permanent desertion
should not be grounds for divorce.
They also hold that those who make an
unfortunate marriage in youth should
endure a lifetime of misery, or, if driv-
en- to a separation, should be doomed
to live henceforth alone.
So the ministers and the brides and
grooms- ELECT do not agree and it is
oftener than not that "obey" is left out
of the marriage ceremony.