The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-01

transcript OF the situation OF trains as
prepared by the dispatcher going off duty.
If the trains are mum ero,ls and on
times the man going on8"smells roast"
IL every thing is in good shape and there
Is plain sailing It is ''pie''-and, paren..
thetlcally let 1t be stated he Is entitled
to all the pie" he can get The inferior
operator or tho beginner, who breaks
much Is a han" or plug" The fast,
sender Is "rusher'' and the boys Will
say che sends good tuff."5ijit
The freight crews frequently term the
passenger trains that cause the freights
to side-track, "the glass windows" The
fast engineer Is sT."' a. ttlS'far,n &s ths slow
ones are .'pokes.' Brakeman were wont
to be called twisters"s till the: air-brake
came to their relief, and now they are
''assistant caps va Passenger conductors
ers," freight conductors bill handlers.
Operators are dubbed lightning singers
and the train dispatches are sometimes
and unjustly denoninated train de-
layers !" "a SE& ,3 35ss s8.,.
Collisions are "head-on, face, rear
end" telescope tall enuors stfa
wipe Many other terms might be CIV
on. j4
Four-wh coal or coke cars are called
"buck Jimmie %5Iand tho large IS eight
wheel cars-which handle the immense
coal trafflc-are Hopper ottom Condo
las" Tho capacity of these cars have
been constantly increased and the larg-
est size are dubbed BY the boys or the
rail-'Mark Hannas.'' This soul-stirring
rhyme was noticed chalked across the
side Of one Of these semi-box cars as 1t
came into our metropolis
i'EL,xsh-a-bye coal car. II
Don't you cry.
You'll be box car IN
BY and by"
&. o5, oJ
ment:
You amt no more poit. '5y
Than a sheep Is a goit!'
A mistake In tho transmission OF
n; ossage by wire Is "a bull" a dispatch
err was notod for his superb Sending" :
It was morse straight!'On an OCCASION
however; the receiving operator was a
new man, and rather than "pieaK
guessed at the words he couldn't get.
The message was to the conductor of O
train, simply calling his attention to o
foot-note in the timetable that went
into effect that day, which made NO.
100 run ono hour late on Sundays. and as
sent by Mr.. Blank read: No 100 runs
ono hour lato to-day according to foot
note In the schedule" AS delivered 1t
rea d. "No. 100 runs one hour lato to-
day, account fools not noting tho sched-
ulel" That was n Enthusiastically 50.
A freight train on tho siding was pass
cd by fast-flyins passenger train and
the conductor Of tho latter, who was on
| the roar platform. apparently did not
notice tho friendly salute of the bill
handler" Tho faithful hauler OF the
| "dusk diamonds" wrote him tho follow
| Ing:
"Chinch Harbor, No. 900 A., on siding
fol n. II. p. August 26
Esteemed INrater Of the Gradient:
| Uf I may be permitted thus to address
you.)
to entirely usurp the functions Of your
throttle-puller In putting on airs" be-
| cause your pig-skin goved paws, hard
ened by twisting brakes when you were
on my lovcl now jerk tho bell ribbon
and punch the pnste-boards handed ur
TO you ~ the def kid gloved fingers OF
females fair Kindly scratch your Gran.
um and couple up to the fact that while
you are happily ensconced In rolling
palace, your brothers of tho "dusky dia
| mond" who give you wide berth. are
making the rocks that ballast the. pix
for the pay-wngon. an essential adjunc
to tho service.
Yours In coal dust, I
Tho following notation was made o.
the turned down corner by the cap. 0
tho glass windows:
"Hhous nrt cen as ust as man as m.
conversation e'er cop'd w1thal. No Sigh
Intended and no broak In my link O
the frnternal chain. I am sweltering Il
the realm of otter of roses enyying you
happy go lucky lifo and the watermelon
YOU steal and enjoy while waiting fc
the gilt-edgc. Give tho grlst train rigt
of wayl
Yours.
. JOHN"
A UNIQUE TOAST
| nj. = ii.
o. ~ to .ro,,an ar NJ - r,i,wnw hann,,f
ppa a,tn, 81 Nav IN vcrv many I.aItimat
ua a,,,, ~ ,,h,ch w,,' NE rarnrn,yo
! ia,thmay sarnin, w., nr,ntor -, n,,t tho,
: m''l'ou. , .H' u','s Wv ''N'' ~ wv '''0'
n ~ .1 1uo'u T., ,mio.a Grand oo,n,,,, an