Amador ledger., 1903-04-24
ETHICS OF KISSING.
A woMAN's VIEWS ON THE SUBJECT
OF OSCILLATION.

Those Men Upon Whom N Modest
Compunction and Those Toward
Whom She should Play the Miser.
There are still occasions, however
rare, when inactivity, much as 1t has
fallen into disfavor, continues to be
mastery. When a modest maiden is in
doubt as to whether or no she should
kiss or allow herself to be kissed by
any man not related to her by close
ties of cons nguinity, she best displays
her wisdom by giving herself, not him,
the benefit of the doubt and so refrain
ing from osculatlon.
An absolutely safe list of men whom
1t Is allowable to kiss might be COM
piled from the list given In the Book Of
Common Prayer of persons whom it Is
forbidden to marry. There can be no
possible improprfety In any woman's
being kissed by her father, grandfather,
brother, uncles, etc, whenever occa-
sion may offer. Still, public opinion is
much less in favor of kissing than Of
yore, and affectIonate greetings are
no longer considered good form In mar
ket places or what answers for them In
the present generation.
To the prayer book may be added
cousins within the degrees forbidden In
marriage by the Roman Catholic
church, but these in moderation. The
young man cousin who is greedy in the
matter of kisses from his pretty cousin
is not to be trusted. He
Should be denied
And set aside and mortified.
Kisses of greeting or parting, of good
night, good morning and of congratu-
lation are still general, although by no
means so frequent as they were for
merly. Indeed, kissing as practice is
much less popular than it once was.
Between doctors and the moralists 1t is
constantly falling more and more into
disfavor, while, still more fatal, Fash
ion, with big F, sets her face as a
flint against all demonstrations of feel
ing as i'll bred.
All the same, the man who becomes
engaged to be married, as a usual
thing, expects q kiss from his fiancee
to seal the bargain, not for publication,
so to say, but as guarantee of good
faith on her part. If she is willing to
promise to marry him, he reasons, she
ought to be willing to let him kiss her.
Moreover, he desires kiss or kisses
upon general principles as something
to which he is entitled by the unwrit-
ten law of tradition. On the other
hand, the party of the second part has
herself to consider In the matter. A
woman should be sure of her own bona
fide intentions of matrimony and dou-
bly, sure Of those Of her lover before
she sets such q sign and seal to the
contract. Engagements of marriage are
by no means frrefragible, and she who
kisses least is likely to have least
cause for future regret. AT all events
a prudent woman will wait until the
engagement is announced before she
permits any kissing. There are men
who have serious objections to marry
ing any woman who has been engaged
to another man, for the simple reason
that they do not choose that any man
shall be able to say of the woman
whom they take to wife that he has
kissed her as her lover. 1t matters lit
tie, rather more, that the kisses have
been given in good faith to an afflanced
husband. It's way men have.
Sir. she's yours!
You have brushed from the grape its soft
blue;
From the rosebud you've shaken the deli
cate dew.
What you've touched you may take
A noted "lady killer" of q past gener-
alton who had been engaged many
times and who boasted to his intimates
that no woman had ever refused an Of
fer Of his hand in marriage was once
asked why IN that case he was still a
bachelor. Because I am waiting until
l can find q woman who will not per-
NIT me to kiss her before we are mar
vied," he replied.
Even though a woman be fully as
sured Of the inevitableness in due time
of her marriage she will be wise not to
be too liberal of her caresses. Most
things in this world are rated as valua-
BILE in direct proportion to their rarity.
Were diamonds as common as pebbles
they would be worth no more CONNER
cially than the common stones Of the
beach and highway. Moreover, one may
have too much Of a good thing. King
Midas story is an old one. '"Too much
water drowned the miller" 1t is a COM
mon practice with confectioners to al
low a new apprentice all the candy
which he or she can eat, certain that In
q little while the surfeit of sweet will
destroy all taste for sugar in any form.
1t is human nature essentially to tire
of what we have much of and to prize
most the fruit which hangs highest
and is most difficult to obtain.
Consequently the woman who Is
chary Of her favors, who is niggardly
even with her caresses, will find that
her lover values them all the more, and
that his respect, as well as his affec
tion, for her becomes the greater in
proportion as he hopes rather than is
sure Of her. 1t has long been q maxim
that no man shall kiss and tell; never
theless, the woman is safest by far of
whom there is nothing which it were
better it were left untold.-Helen Old
field In Chicago Tribune.
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PriyfleUed Person.