davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1903-04-16
NAMING OF THE CHILDREN.
Absurdities of Present Customs are
Largely Due to Ignorance.

with the beginning of the next
century, 1000 A. D., let us hope to see
change Of custom by the enlightened
people of that period as regards the
naming Of Children remarked a we'll
dressed man in the lobby of an up
town hotel this morning.
perhaps personal names may be
| done away with by that time" sug-
gested another gentleman, "and some
personal designation adopted which
will be more satisfactory and definite
| than in use now; one BETTING the
great advance in civilization and re-
! fnement then attained. For instance,
| let us offer a prayer that in 1000 A. D.
, parents will not inf1ict upon their off
spring patronymics such as mine
E, Archibald Archibald"
Mine is William Williams" re-
piled the first speaker.
| "And NINE" spoke up the third
gentleman lis Edwin Edwards"
81 worry along with MacAllister
| MacAllister," remarked a Scotchman
from the depths Of an easy chair.
1.-The system Of personal designa-
tion," resumed Mr.. Archibald, (which
permits parents to impose any name
| they please upon a child, a name
which must cling to him through life,
unless he has it changed by legal
process, is open to serious consider
alton and criticism. AS another
brief example there are in the Wash
ington city directory forty-eight
William Johnsons, eighteen John
Smiths ,forty-fve William Joneses
and twenty-five William Greens. to
say nothing Of the innumerable other
similar cases of repetitions.
Another senseless feature as re-
gard names is where an engraved
piece of paste board is flashed under
our plebieian eyes and our intellects
are benumbed with awe as we read
something like this: Mrs. Reg maid
Ronaldson Revelstroke-R evelstroke
One is as senseless as the other, and
it would certainly sound startling
hear a leather-lunged lackey call out
Mrs Revelstroke-Reve
SIIOh0 , CdIIIdSt- Inc ny putudleu IT,
peated name, alas, is growing in pop
ularity in some quarters, but ordinary
mortals look upon the affectation as
absurd and worthy of the ridicule it
receives.
''Repetitions and similarity of names
result largely from lack of original
ity on the part of parents and also
from parental pride. The same old
titles are handed down from father to
son ad libitum for generations. In
a few generations more, if the prac-
tice is kept UP, there will be, for i'll
stance. John Smith, ADD which will
be as much in keeping as John Smith,
3D. or Peter Jones, 3d. as we see
now so often in print, and all Of the
intervening John Smiths, from list
to '42d.' will be simply shadOwy, for
gotten myths of memory.
CAS- confusing and Objectionable as
is this practice, however it IS not so
bad as the habit some parents have Of
giving to their child the same Chris
tian name as his surname, as, by
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1903-04-16

may be just as pretty and just as
sweet tempered as the woman en-
gagged in any other work, but she de-
voted her working hours to children
whose affection may be pleasant to
have but not effective so far as the
future is concerned. The stenographer.
on the other hand, is likely to produce
affection in men who have the ability
if they have the inclination. to offer
her a home
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1903-04-16

similar coincidence, four of these I'M
happy individuals happen to meet in
single hotel at the same time in Wash
ington"
And to celebrate what was certainly
a remarkable coincidence all of the
gentlemen of one accord retired to the
cafe to debate further the situation
Washington Star.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1903-04-16
ELIzABET4's GERMAN BABIES.

Elizabeth Of tie German Garden
has recently become the mother of
her first son. This interesting bit OF
news was sent to an American friend
Of ElizaDeth-the Countess Won Arnim
together with the information that
the relatives Of the delightful Eliza
beth are quite jubilant in consequence.
Another girl baby has joined the fam
lily since the famous books were writ
ten so that there is an April, May,
June and July sister to welcome the
first boy. Ore wonders if the Man OF
Wrath will think it necessary. now
that he has son and heir, to move
to town and so assert his authority as
heau of the family.
It was the man of wrath who said
after the second book had been writ
ten about the garden and the second
gardener had gone crazy, that the
gardens principal productions seemed
to be literature and insanity From
al accounts it would seem as if it had
been we'll sown also with babies.
The friend who has received the
news of the arrival Of the son and heir
tells a funny story on Elizabeth
When the April Baby's Book of Tunes
came out the author thought she
would read it TO children about whom
it had been written, and seating them
in row before her she read extracts
from the portraits of herself and them
from it. She was rather nonplussed
wen she paused for praise or crit
cism, to hear from the eldest of the
trio-the April baby herself-"What
a silly mother and what silly Chill
dren,'
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1903-04-16
Money for Scientists.

The following grants of money to
assist original research by members
of Johns Hopkins university have been
made by the Carnegie institute: For
measurement of osmotic pressure,
$1,000; for a research assistant to
Professor Wood, $1,000; for physical
chemistry, $1,000; apparatus for
ply siological chemistry research,
$1,000; for research in the theory Of
magnetic field, amount not fixed.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1903-04-16

Leaf and dust and cold past cities
with curious names, and scenes from
old picture-books, and groups of lean
Hindoos, decently naked. We saw
vultures waiting for the dead, I'D
peIicans, wild green parrots and
monkeys; starving sore dogs. t.i1
pigs, weak goats; sweetmeal, f1owe
and fruit sellers, coolies. Iascars,
sweepers, tillers and cultivators of
the soil, sturdy native infantry, Eng
lisn soldiers, poor Brahmins superb
with cast marks, pilgrims bound for
the tomb Of Salim Christi. every kind
and description OF small boy. vaga-
bond and adventurer waiting al Inc
various stations to see the trains. to
do little bargaining, stealing or con-
jUring, to get carried on possibly. by
good luck, to the camp at Delhi. The
tracts of country between the halting,
places suggested only the desert and
despair; sandy roads and fat inter-
mlnabIe plains which. in spite of their
desolation, seemed invisibly inhabited.
perhaps by unhappy ghosts, perhaps
by some of the despised baser sort Of
native with meek Vanishing eyes and
brittle limbs. There is a force in
these plains as cruel and as forbid
ding, as deep and as hungry, as the
sea: there is, one feels, world OF
worlds engulfed in the barren soil; it
has fearful vitality-the ruined city
of Fatehpur-Sigri is dead, imperial
ancient Rome is. dead. Versailles is
dead, but the plains breathe as the
ocean breathes: they hold a terror
which strikes, captivates, appals the
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. Oliver Hobbies in
Golfers Weekly.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1903-04-16
CONCERNING MOMEN.

Mrs. Irene Sanford Chaffee is dead
at Springfield, Mass, aged IS. Mrs.
C-?af ae, who came of a leading Vir-
ginia family, once owned the famous
slave bred Scot. 1t was in a case in
volving his liberty that the United
States supreme court decided that a
negro, free or slave, had no rights
before the Law. Mrs. Chaffee, though
not actually an abolitionist, was al
ways in sympathy with the coIored
man. Her ownership Of Scot was an
accident. and after the decision named
had been rendered, she freed the
man.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1903-04-16
Famous Flaq of Truce.

In Lord Roberts town house i'll
Portland Place is a small and not
over clean white piece of linen OF
irregular shape, and it is placed in
a very conspicuous position. Very
few visitors fail TO notice it, but none
can ever guess what it is until they
are told. Then they learn that it is
Cronje's flag of truce" which he
sent in preparatory to his surrender
at Paardeberg
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1903-04-16

An interesting ceremony took place
in the city hall Of Ottawa recently,
when the Countess of Mimic, VIE of
the governor general, presented the
medal Of the Ottawa Humane society
to Mrs. Mary May in recognition of
her heroism in saving nine persons
from death by drowning. Mrs. May
is an expert swimmer and has lived
most of her life on the banks or the
Rijeau canal. where eight OF the
Tescues in question were affected.
The ninth took place last summer at
a bathing resort in the neighborhood
Of the capital, and happened to be
witnessed by an officer of the Humane
society.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1903-04-16
Facts for Our Farmers:


acquires a well-tilted farm, we'll
filled barn, a wife well willed. Dol
lars and cents cannot measure the
success and happiness Of such a man.
We should be Indifferent to wealth,
except as it is a power to righteous
ness. In these days of strong ana
sharp competition in all branches of
business, and particularly is this true
in the lines of produce the farmer
raises-he must be keen and clear
sighted, putting a large amount Of
thought into his business, calculating
ahead, counting the cost. and figuring
out as near as he can the profits, be
fore he starts venture; the day Of
drifting, thinking of making a success
along any line of business, has gone
by; the man that would make a sue
cessful farmer must set his standard
high, and then SET out with a de-
termination to rise to it. How many
Of our farmers are satisfied to remain
on the lower plains Of life-spending
a large amount of time at the taverns
and pOstOffice, smoking and gossiping.
Too many of our farmers are too
much like our abOrigines,-in want at
one season, Over-satiated at another.
think too much emphasis cannot be
put on the start, when a boy is young.
As soon as he can earn few pennies,
interest him to save and lay away at
least 50 per cent. Of what he earns.
This habit will grow as he gets older,
md he will soon discover that he has
a reserve on hand that will come in
very handy when he has need of it.
We can find in nature a good
illustration of reserve force. We are
hearing much nowadays of saving the
forest to save our rivers; the
mountains being covered with forests
keep the hot rays of the sun from
absorbing the moisture. and, retain
ing the water, allowing il to come out
in springs and feed the river in dry
times. We can learn much Of value
from nature if we will only think and
study her laws, and we would do well
to learn this lesson Of reserve. We
cannot be too careful and exact
financiers.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1903-04-16
THE ROAD TO DELHI.
Forty-Seven Tons of Dresses and Uni
forms in One Durbar Party.

Our party had brought between us
forty-seven tons Of dresses and uni
forms for the Durbar festivities: there
was no time to look at Bombay while
boxes so valuable had to be collected,
sorted and stacked in the special train
bound for Delhi. AS it was, we lerr
the station nearly two hours late. For
two days and a night we rushed in the
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1903-04-16

Miss Cecilia Lotus will enter a
new field Of endeavOr and write q
play. She has received an order from
May Irwin to cOllaborate on a play
for Miss Twins use next season.
While in England recently Miss Lotus
discovered a new literary prodigy
Miss Marguerite Regain, 3. A, author
o. numerous humorous sketches and
poems.
Miss Lotus read some of these
stories to Miss irwin and the fresh
humOr displayed in them appealed SO
fOrcibly to Miss Irwin that she begged
Miss LOTUS to cable Miss Regain. com
missioning her to collabOrate with
Mss Lotus on a play-Miss Lotus
also to furnish the music and lyrics
The song, My Bed Is Like a Little
Boat" which Miss Lotus wrote fiji
Miss Irwin, and which the Coincidence
sang in tSister Mary" has Melted
more than 5000 thus far in royalties
Miss LOTUS is Mr. Sothern's leading
; woman and he is quite enthusiastic
over the new venture. He gave proof
Of it by buying "Cissy' a brand new
typewriter.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1903-04-16

Science has its deyotees among
Italian women one of whom, Signora
Bernardo PirOyano Of Crema, has
lately taken her degree in the medical
faculty and broken the record as the
Youngest doctor of medicine and
surgery at the University of Pavia.
As a physician to woman and children
in Florence she is about to settle
down.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1903-04-16

Common sense ranks next after
wisdom.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1903-04-16

Feeding standards are the condensed
results of many experiments and
much practical experience. Although
not to be regarded as mathematically
farmers
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1903-04-11
LOST AMONG sAvAcEs.
nAaR Passes Seventeen Years Anon.
Australian Natives.

! seventeen Years Amon1
Australian Natives.
IA l846 the bark Peruvian was
wrecked of the coast of Queensland
Inc story Of the one survivor. lanes
murreil as told In Marcus Clarke,s
australia Of the Past" is as strange
as the adventures of "Robinson Cr,1.
soc. For seventeen years Murrell
AVed among the savages, and all hut
forgot his own language, his name and
the memory of his native land.
Al last one day vessel came to the
shore while Murrell was absent, aud
me sailors gave shirts to the natives.
Murrell told the natives that IL ever
another ship came and he was not on
the spot, they should find him. An
other ship did come, and the sayages.
remembering the wishes of their com
panlen, tried to attract the crew, But
tne Engiishmen, not understanding
tneir Wild shouts, fired at them and
droVe them away Murrell despaired
or ever seeing home again. ..,.l
Not long after, a white man with
two horses came upon some natives
lamenting the death Of an old man,
Fossbiy he mistook the ceremonies
Tor signs Of hostility. At any rate, he
ahot the old mans son, and for this
was murdered by the tribe, who be-
came so suspicious Of whites that Muir
reH had less chance than before of
coming face to face with his country.
men. -
He told the natives that the white
men fired at them because they did not
understand the language, and said
that next time he would go himself
and explain. They consented, and
Murrell went exploring with a native,
until he came to a white mans hut
many miles down the coast.
Getting clear Of the shrub, the exile
saw the smoke Of a chimney and sheen
Feeding on the grass. The sight OF
these strange animals frightened the
native, and he ran back alone.
Murrell went into a water-hole,
where he washed himself as white as
he could, and then, standing on the
fence, where the dogs could not bite
him, he hailed the hut. There were
two men living there. One came out
and cried, "Bill, there's a yellow man
standing on the rails, naked. He's not
black. Bring the gun"
Murrell cried, Don't shoot! l am a
British object, he had So far for.
gotten his language that he confused
''object" and Subject, ia shipwreck,
ed sailor"
The two men received him kindly,
and heard his story. They asked hin,
If he knew what date it was. He did
not.
1.-THE twenty-f1fth of January, 1858
You have been lost seventeen years. n
He tried to eat bread, but it choked
him, and he had lost his relish foI
sugar and tea.
His white rescuers took him to the
newly made town Of Bowen, where q
subscription was raised for him. Later
he was baptized, married, and ap
pointed to small place as keeper Of
bonded stores In the government
house,
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1903-04-11
CHEF GETS A BIG SALARY.

King Edwards Cook Receives Stipend
Equal to that of Bauk President.
The chef who perpares the food for
the table Of King Edward of England
receives as large salary as does an
admiral of fleet or lieutenant gen.
eral of the army. Every year he draws
from the royal exchequer the handsome
sum of $4,000. The man who at pres
emf occupies the post is a native Of
southern France and his name Is Mena-
ger. His age is about 40 and he Is con-
sidered. at least by King Edward, the
most capable chef in the world.
SO great a culinary artist Is not ex-
pected to produce three masterpieces
in one day, so he has nothing to do
with the kings breakfast. He arrives
at Buckinham palace from his private
residence near by in hanson at
about II o'clock.
In large, sunny kitchen, overlook
ing the lawns, he receives the lunch
con carte, drawn up by Lord FarQuhar,
and his work begins. First Of all he or
ders what will be required and the mas
ter of the kitchen sees that all the ar
ticles come in, checks each item and
then sends the account to Sir Nigel
Kingscote, the paymasteC, who writes
out check in payment.
After luncheon Is served NJ. Menager
retires once more, to reappear at
o'clock, when the great event Of the
day-the preparation for dinner COM
mences. That over, the artist Is free for
the evening. 1t Ia worth noting that he
owes his enviable post solely to hard
work and genius, for the cook, Nike the
poet, is born, not made. An additional
interest attaches to this culinary auto
crat because of the encouragement he
gives to women cooks.
It has always been said that women
cannot attain to great heights as cooks
and creators Of dishes, and that just as
they fail to excel in music, poetry and
painting they fail also In the higher
mysteries Of cooking. It. lS very inter
esting to learn On the testimony of the
kings cook that this iS no longer true,
however true it may have been for
merly.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1903-04-11
Not UJust as Good.

Your dealer may tell you that come
other brand of peaches and pears and
other fruits is as good ss or the same as
Monopole. Don't you believe such a
statement 1t isn't So and your dealer
wouldn't make it if he would only com.
pare all the other so+called high class
brands with Monopole. Monopole
fruits are packed to order in special
canneries and are packed in a special
way. They are, therefore, sweeter,
more natural in flavor and more deIici-
GUS than any other brand. Get Mono
pole from your grocer. Wadhams &
Kerr Bros, Monopole grocers and dry
coffee roasters, Portland, Oregon.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1903-04-11

Mrs. Frances Stafford, of 243 E.
Hath St., NY. City, adds her ties.
timOny to the hundreds Of thou.
sands ON Mrs. Pinkham's files.
When Lydia E. Pinkham's Reme-
dies were first introduced skeptics
all over the country frowned upon
their curative claims, but as year
after year has rolled by and the
little group Of women who had been
cured by the new discovery has
since grown into a vast army Of
hundreds of thousands, doubts and
skepticisms have been swept away
as by mighty food, until to-day
the great good that Lydia e.
Pinlham's Vegetable Compound
and her other medicines are doing
among the women of America is
attracting the attention of many of
our leading scientists, physicians
end thinking people.
Merit alone could win such fame I
wise therefore, is the woman who
for o cure relies upon Lydia E.
PfnAham's Vegetable Compound.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1903-04-11
Fined for DANCING.

At Luchow, Germany, l25 fathers
have been fined one mark each for al
lowing their children, under 10 years
Of age, to dance at the harvest festival
of village nearby. The village pastor
objected to the dancing and reported
the case to the police. It was discov-
cred, however, that his children had
danced, too, and he was fined with the
rest.-Tit- Bits. -.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1903-04-11
Premonitory symptoms.

A promising young Sunday achool
pupil, who had learned about Ewes be-
ing formed from the rib of Adam, came
home one day greatly distressed.
oh, mamma, ! have such pain! I
think it must be that I'm going to have
q little Wife!"-Little Chronicle.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1903-04-11
Thought Better of Herself.

"When Jack proposed, I suppose you
asked him if you we're the only girl he
ever loved2" asked Polly.
"I should say not! 1 inquired il
the other girls didn't represent steps in
his progression to his present ideal, "
said Dolly.-Baltimore Herald.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1903-04-11
No One Made a Motion.

"Kin any one make motion2" asked
one of the audience. "Gents," said
Alkali Bill. chairman of the meeting,
as he laid his revolvers on the table,
"owin' to the general custom of wearin'
weapons in these parts, l trust no one
will make notion"
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1903-04-11
Simple Enough.

Mamma Ito friend who is lunchinp
with her)--I don't know why it il, bnt
! always eat more when We have com.
pany than when we're alone.
Tommy (heiping himself to third
piece of cake)-I know why il is.
cause swhe have better things to eat
Brookly Life.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1903-04-11
Taking No Chances.

Clerk-Im' sorry, sir, but can not
sell you any morphine.
Homely Customer-Why, do 1 look
like man who would kill himself?
Clerk don't know, but if looked
like you should be tempted.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1903-04-11
Helpful Husband.

Cicero Moke-I came to tole yo' !,
ma'am, dat Lucy Brown, what done
leabe yo' yesteday, amt gwine lib out
no mo, kase che married ne today.
Mrs. Hauskeep-Indeedl Well?
Cicero Moke-WelI, fought mebbe
yo' might let her do yo' washin'. Pm
drummin' up trade fer her dis nom
i'm
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1903-04-11
Only When Ordered.

Scientific and Nervous Visitor Cat
country hoteD-I suppose there's no
ptomaine in this pie?
Waiter (quite equal to the occasion)
NO sir. We never puts that in unless
specially ordered.-Punch.