The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1903-01-15

Why are they called "Independent ODer-
ators? Because they don't, have to sell
$z.5o coal under SIS unless they want to.
Professor Delitzsch travelled over the site
Of Babylon last year and reports that the
Old Testament got its ideas from Babylon
Next year some Professor SzchsphIytzsch
Will travel over the site of Babylon and
report that the Old Testament did NOT
get its ideas from Babylon. So there you
are -. a.>.. ~ 4
~s%.-.-E -.i - ze~s4-- i
After a careful persual of, his millinery
bills by the Utah legislature it is found
that Mr.. Smoot has !, but: one. Wise
apostle! -1t1@ &.
1.-THE baseball war has been settled"
say the sport pages. 1t, was settled for
us several years ago when we decided to
give up no more half lids to see punk
games. ~... ~ '%t% s1:
The India Rubber man finds the side
walks great sport and he drops on his
neck and rebounds back to his feet.
Mr.. Hewlett, age 80, is going to enter
tain 100 widows on his birthday. Hewlett
evidently believes that he can skate very
close to the weak ice. ~'S
Chicago society ladies' say that they do
not know of any buds who smoke and
drink as Lucy Page Castor AYERS Can
it be possible that Miss Castor has quiet
cigarette in her bood-wah?
Trolley lines headed for Minneapolis
from all directions but none to Mime,
tonka, where the traffic is. !.
Teary Tanks Romances No. 1.-THE
next time Alice and the children saw their
wonderful story stellef he was sitting on
the grass In Bryn Mawr partaking of a
rather frugal handout which he had ac-.
quired on the hill. -. .
"Have you had any more adventures,
Mr.. Tank" asked Alice.
''Me real name is Tankington,'' replied
the cheerful scoundrel, ."Tearleigh Tank
ington. and me fadder was member Of de
British arustoctracy Of course do gang
along de road calls me <Tea1y Tank for
short-an' I don't much care. Yes, me
gal, I've just had a series OF wonderful
adventures but dey calls for a pie an
tree doughnuts to hear en-.
Alice promised to see what she could do
and have it there in the morning and thus
fortified in hope, the anchor of the soul,
Tank began his story. 80
II was upsin TangletoWn agin yestiddy
loOkin'E for dat fancy BALI house, I told We
about fought it was good: for anodder
feed, but blow me if. could find her. It's
| a regular Aladdin palace, I don't t'iulz!
| But dere was a brown stone 'ouse afore
| me and she alookedstfziasaal like unlimited
b! pie so Tank rememberip' de odder affair
an just trustin' I'd spfoVe1dnnceF goes UP
/ an. punches de door bell A mug in yoyn-
erform comes out an kicks Tank in de
small Of de back, see? So I goes away
disgusted,s Den I tries, every brown stone
| on de street till comes to No. 1913 (Tank
| called it T'irteen-Tirteen) an I passed
| dat on de odders side Of de street. See:
But wot was me surprise to see beauti:
| full fairy wild a wife apun an a lace car
on come out an beckun me across! Me
vest was now fappin' In de breeze for lack
| of brekfus to fill 'er out, SO goes. acIos
but wild me fingers crost, mind We: Da1
busts de hdodoo, We know. An de cir
says, me mistress would have speech vic
YOU ~ ".'r.' =
"Says I, I'd have preferred to hear "
say dinner but-lead on an Tank will fol
low
"She TUX me into de- drorin' room an
| went away. Dere set an elderly loidy II
mournin wild a prayer. book open afOr'
her. She raised her glasses ON stills an
lookin' me over, says: ..i,>
"Tearleigh Harrington, / presume"
IT started" ."- n.'[ > 49,.
yes she says. IT .knowed We well
Yer royal fadder W en- he distnherited you
| lef all his Dough TO me an a Sau Oey l
was for me an me family. Yer fadde
was fond Of me- She weep.
II says madam, wot boots it now. Yo
) has de pewter AM has noting but a.
empty feelin' at brekfus time
but I intend to make her all right
says she. Here's draft for Ten T'ousan
Dollars all made out to you an signed b
de gov'ner of dc bank 30 49,
: Madam says I, drorin': meself u
kinder dlgnif1ed like, I'D .scorn to touc
a penny of de OF mans boarded wealt
He trun me down in me. yout', an now le
] him come an get me up
, But he's dead says she.
ct don't care if he is said I. Tan
don't want none O. his, stuff. But
+ you've got any cold vittals lef' over fro1
t dinner &..-.t stss~. ..>.e 81.
: ''Say no more sed she an tough
Z she looked relieved, you shall have c
0 best de 'ouse affords
e "An' dat's de way got me dinner We!
: tiddy an a, prime one it was an all troug
de aksurdent Of Her a-recognlzlng Me OF
of de winder. Wonderful ~
: 1T was SURPRISING" said Alice, but
q I'd been you I think I'd have taken fly
: dollars at least z.-t<-;, S..
: mot if you'd had my PRIDE said Il
o Tank. "Our family always was terrib
: sensitive. No sir, not.o dime. Let e
r keep dere wealt. Tank is child OF {
3 woods an de fields an de railroad trac
. He don't owe ting to nobody. Not OF
o dime! Not one dime!''