The Savannah morning news. (Savannah, Ga.) 1900-current, 1903-08-16
WOMAN'S WORLD

prose of everyday life. Never shall
forget MadePs expression when I
I told her we must stop billing and
cooling and get down to common sense.
Her lips trembled and a look came
INTO her face such as people wear
when there is death in the family, and
l know she thought her dream of hap
pness was over forever. When
came home in the evening she had
not dressed for dinner and was lying
mar lnanimate on a sofa, reading
Bliss Carman'S poems. l had to take
her in hand and explain gently but
nrmly that it didn't mean that l did
not love her any more because 1 said
we must stop billing and cooling, but
that relied on her common sense to
make a congenial, companionable little
helpmeet, and that billing and cooling
were not to be banished forever.
never had to talk quite so long or quite
so persuasiVely, but in the end l con-
WINGED my wife that married life is
not continuous performance of the
balcony scene from Romeo and JUL
let From the time l stopped kissing
the palms of her hands and folding up
a verse of poetry in her napkin at
breakfast our married life has been
more congenial in every way. When
she was willing to relinquish her
dream of perpetual spooning 1 found
her an all around sensible little Wom-
an.
''Mabers clubs were another of my
grievances. There were all sorts of
thermometers clubs, sewing clubs,
walking clubs, talking clubs, afternoon
card clubs, lunching clubs and don't
worry clubs. They were the bane of
my existence, and the delight of hers.
Now, l knew no ordinary managing
would her of This
evil, and l thought out another plan.
But finally l went off to my own neg
lected club and sat with my head in
corner four hours, and consumed
four straight whiskies thinking it out
To cure her of this club habit, L re-
Elected, she must be touched on her
most sensitive point. And what was
it? At last an idea struck me, and
fairly jumped for joy. went home
and waited a couple of hours for Ma
bel to come from her How-to-be-H Hap
py-Though-Married Club my idea went
on gaining in brilliancy.
" DO you know, my dear, that the
club habit is said to be a sign of age?'
| asked. Then 1 went on to tell how
a German professor had discovered
this to be a fact, and how it was gem
orally accepted among people of intel
lect and that you could be sure a wom-
eAll was ollOWlIlS Tie lISL SlSIlS OF
age when she took to clubs, and that
TO belong to many proclaimed her
passe entirely. Mabel looked troubled
and did not eat much. After dinner
l caught her studying her face in a
hand glass.
1.-THE poor child was just rs, and
my heart smote upon me when 1 saw
her fresh, unwrinkled complexion and
reflected on my villainy, but the end
Justifies the means in married life, and
now Mabel has cut all her clubs ex-
cept the afternoon euchre, and has
resumed her proper signature of Mrs.
William Hapgood Sniffen. Getting old
and passe was more than the little
woman could stand
THE children's teeth and their relig-
ious training are matters 1 leave en-
tirely to my wife; in fact, most that
concerns their moral welfare L leave
to the mother. whom think the proper
spiritual adviser, but one thing 1 draw
the line at, and l have fought hard
and persistently against it. will not
let my boys wear long curls and
Fauntlery collars. I expect them all
to grow up Presidents of the United
States, and I won't have them dwarfed
in early life by sissy curls.
Now the worm, having had his say.
will crawl back and resume the ST.
lence of a worm. But l feel better
and am glad L did it. 1 only hope.
though, this may never reach Mabel's
ear