davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06


An aged New Yorker named Plat
With Oden had an elegant spat.
So Odeu went to Ted
And TO him Teddy said.
We'll, ven have TO show Piatt where
SO the two called in old Mr. Platt
And together the three Of them sat,
And the two then began
To tell the old man
mat
Much obliged" said the foxy old Platt
AS be rose and adjusted his hat,
You're Goth very kind.
But please bear in mind
have twenty more lives than a cat"
One reason why children so enthusi-
actically welcome Christmas is that
they are at the receiving end Of it
only.
one reason why Smoot should con-
graduate himself is that Carrie Nation
has not yet taken up his cause.
The administration comedies that the
remarks Of Messers. Reyes and Herran
on the Panama matter are interesting
although scarcely timely.
Friends and enemies alike viii Join
in hoping the investigation Of Gen.
Wood viii not lead to a reopening Of
the embalmed beef affair.
AS next year will be leap year, Jan.
1st win be the gladdest New Year many
single ladies have had fer some time.
Salary and Pay.
Faysun Footights-What is your SAL
airy with this company
Flybee Knights, 600 per week.
Faysun FOothghtG-HOw much mon
ey do You get2
Flybee Knight-$2O every Tuesday.
Strike, stake. strikeH' says John
Mitchell, and those who predicted that
he would settle the trouble in Colorado
in about fifteen minutes are headed for
the woods.
The anti-SmoOt cohorts have opened
headquarters which, it must be admit
ted, is more than SmOot did when he
WIS a candidate for election.
II what some Of those witnesses be-
fore the senate committee say is true
Gen. Wood should be given a place on
the bench instead of major generalship
in the army, as their testimony indi-
Gates that he is a great hand to con-
strue the laws.
Not satisfied with Peter Neidermeir'
confession that he kas killed about half
I the people he ever knew. the attorney
I for another of the young Chicago muir
/ derers is trying to fasten a hypnOtism
/ charge on poor Peter
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06

Governor Wells says it would be an
everlasting disgrace for any employer
to discharge an employe who is a mem
Der Of the national guard and on duty
in Carbon county. We agree with the
governor, but the fact remains that a
great many business men are being Sc
riously Inconvenience for the sake OF
the Utah Fuel company. And there is
scant reason for believing it is neces-
sary to continue the troops In the
field
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06

The death Of former Congressman
home in Washington removes a man
who, while not much in the public eye
in very recent years. was not SO long
ago one of the most prominent men in
the nation. Mr.. Springer's brilliant
ability won for him the most coveted
craftsmanship in the house Of represen-
tatives-the Craftsmanship Of the COM
mittee on ways and means, where he
served with distinguished credit His
death assumes the Importance Of a ma
tiOnaI loss.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
Apt Comparison.


II was Mark Twain's custom to always
have his tonsorial requirements attended
20 al an uptown hosiery. On one occas-
ion Mr.. Clemens was doing while the
skilful hands Of the artist" trimmed his
thick, white hair, when the sharp call OF
"front" awoke him. the nOisemaker
presenting him with a card. The diminl-
tive hotel employee was of more interest
TO the great humorist than was the card.
Marks eyes twinkled and then he looked
solemn.
And who are you?" he inquired.
gravely.
a page, SIR" replied the boy
"A pager" exclaimed Mark. with due
ecorn, "a page-humph-Why. YOU aren't
more tIan paragraph
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
Can Again, sami
Mogan Journal.)

Sam Whitney was in town Tuesday, and
took occasion while in the Journal office
TO set the state press aright upon some
matters of criminal history. He sa IS
that the statements recently published
about "Jace', Luce being the first man
executed in Utah, and about John Fer
guson being shot, are not true He says
that two Indians were the first men le-
galiy executed in Utah, that Ferguson
was killed before Luce. and was hung
instead Of being shot. Sam says he saw
the executions, and therefore knows what
be Is talking about
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
Proud Of Their Musical instruments.


Peter Hanson is dispensing music at
the regular Friday night hops at the So
cial hail. with a violin that is over 200
years old. He purchased the instrument
some time ago from AL Workman ana
sent TO an expert to have it overhauied
who identified it as of very old pat
tern of superior quality and workman
ship, and now Mr.. Hanson is as proud
Of it as the Express man is of his new
baby.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
Editors Awful Mistake.


While at Manti last week the editor OF
the Reaper got his drinks mixed and as
a result he got several birth notices bad
" mixed up il the last Reaper. 1t was
announced that Mrs. +. c. Wright and
Mrs A +. Accord had presented their
liege lords with girl babies, when in tact
the new arrivals were male heirs. 1t was
the first time the editor had been away
in many months, and If this is the ei-
feet he had best stay at home altogether
hereafter
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
has He No Friendsp
(Box Elder News)

(Box Elder News.)
Somebody was mean enough a few
nights ago to pass off on David z. Burt,
the dispenser of tickets at the opera
house. a metal check bearing the words:
Good for one drink" AS Mr.. Burt IS
strictly temperate. the check is value
less to him. and he is out a quarter IN
the fransa ctfOn
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
Should Lac Melted Il %.
nogan Journal.l

lLORaEI JOurndt.J
That coal is coal these days in Preston,
also that honesty prevails there, is proved
by the fact that the finder OF a two
and-0ne-half-pO lump advertised for
the owner. who could regain his treasure
by proving property and paying for the
"ad. The editor is evidently trying 10
obtain a lien on the precious carbon.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
A Shocking Affair.
Logan Iournal.l

Honorable Aquila Nebeker returned from
Salt Lake on Saturday While in the
Capital city he gave the partisans OF
the University football team "a shock. by
offering TO bet any sum agreeable that
the second A. c. eleven can whip the
/ Varsity bunch. He found no takers,
however
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06

A Chicago dispatch says the prices
OF championship beef on the hoof at
a recent sale averaged so per cent less
than a year ago. In this connection
has anybody heard of any reduction
whatever in the price of meat to the
consumer thereof?
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06

1t is asserted that Niedermeyer. the
young murderer under arrest in Chi
cagO, offered one Of his guards $4,000
for permission to get away. There is
at least one good reason why his at
tempt at bribery failed. Niedermeyer
hasn't $4,000, or any considerable frac-
ton OF it,
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06

The president OF a great mining COM
Dany doesn't believe in paying an ex-
ira Christmas dividend, because such A
step might be looked on in the east as
an attempt to boom the stock. Still,
we rather think the stockholders to
whom the dividend would be paid
would be willing 20 assume that risk.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
Hugt suffer in the Winter.

ILmcrN county EIusIeaa-J
some English matrons announce that
girls cant dress on 500 per year" We
discovered that fact IN Castle Valley
twenty years ago. where the girls haven
got the aforesaid five hundred.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06

Word that the Hay-Herran treaty
was rejected ION its merits" what
ever that may mean. comes rather late.
Panama, aided by the strenuous one.
has already plucked the persimmon tree
un by the roots.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06

Answering an inquiry we wiz say
that Under the Bamboo Tree" was not
written to be sung by President Roose-
welt and Senator Hanna. but we ex-
pect them to sing 1t together almost
any time.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
SIN Charges Vindicated.
CPark Record.O

The election of DR.. c. NJ Wilson as
mayor of this city Is an endorsement OF
the Republican administration, and a
complete vindicatiOn of the silly, sense
less charges made against II during the
past few months.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06

Mayor-elect Morris may not know it,
but a lot of Office seekers in this town
are looking to him to play Santa Claus
for them this year.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
unrenentant Editor.
CSalina sun


The pOst-electiOn issue Of the Sun
curled the hair of number Of politicians
in Salina. We're Id glad Of it. Inns
paper is not published TO carry joy TO
the hearts of lucerne-bloated politicians.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
Cause For It.

Hungry Hank-Dis paper SAYS dat
drinkin makes you nervous. Wouldn't
dat jar you?
Dry Dan-Weii, sometimes T git nerv-
Gus when I'm drinkin q glass o. whisky.
Hungry Hank-AW. git out
Dry Dan-Sure. It makes me nervous
to think mebbe I won't git another
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
A Benign Fever.

" eLudA l1AlllH 1s.J
Our neOple are still taking the Can
ada fever. Those who have gone before
are reported as doing exceptionally well.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
NOT A CITIZEN.

To The Salt Lake Herald
VIII you kindly answer the following
question in your next Sunday Herald
A young man immigrated 10 this country
at the age of years and IS now 26, but
has not taken out any NATURALIZATION pa
pers. is he d citizen or will he have to
take out his papers first? Y. p.
Bingham. Utah, Dec. q
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
Funny PIC b Meet.

Emery County Progress.)
The county commissioners meet in an
adjourned session on the first Monday IN
December
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
c. ~. owen, Please Notiee.


Every gentleman escorting five ladies
to the dance at COnley's tomorrow even
ing viii receive a fine box Of chocolate
creams.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06

(Logan Journal.)

(Logam Journal.)
The expense of keeping the state troops
at the coal mines in the southern part
OF the state-Sl 900 a day-win be added
to the state tax next year.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
Received . Rullett.

Utah Plaindealer)
G. W. Bullet was a pleasant caller at
our office last week Mr.. Bullett is an
adnlirer of the Plaindealer.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
HuMOR IN SIATE PRESS.


Spanish Fork Press.)
James n Greer and his mules went
to Sanpete last Monday.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06

He viii have to be naturalized before
voting unless he came to this country
with his father who became naturalized
before the boy reached the age Of q. In
this event the fathers naturalization
makes the son a citizen. In any event il
will be necessary for him only to take
out the last papers.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
Conldn,t Catch -.

ogden Standard)
The council adjourned last evening
without transacting any business until
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
Different Kind Of Work.

YES" said the steel magnate to the
reporter, ct is true we are letting
many of Jour mill hands 60" That
viii mean quite a reduction in the
number of your employees, viii it not?'
queried the reporter Not at all, not
at all, sir" was the answer. I'VE shall
fill their places with farm hands"
The reporter knew his business. He
asked no further questions, but wrote
a long story stating authoritatively
that steel stock would be watered.
tt will be noted that the distinguished
warriors who are active in the peace
movement are men who have already
achieved their fame in war. a cfrcum-
stance which lays them open to the
charge Of selishness.
The royal British commission has de-
clared against arsenic in food, which is
really startling. It's getting to a point
where none of the old stand-bys in
the way OF grub have a show.
Governor Bliss of Michigan has vol
UNFAIRLY relinquished his pension. The
exact nature of his malady is not
known.
His appeal to the governor conveys
the impression that Mr.. Elder not only
feared his case would be thrown out
Of court, but that his person would re-
ceive like treatment
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06

Even II the worst does come to the
worst we all have something coming
Christmas.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
an ARRRFVTATToN.

To The Salt Lake Herald.
What is the abbTeviatiOn for ''merCan-
tile"2 FUTILE MERCANTILE co.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06
It's the Best

The authorization is mctile.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06

If It's the Best
Work obtainabIe its from the
Tel. 1872. TROY LAUNDRY,
166 Main St
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06

The lady doth protest too much. m
thinks"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-06

An aged New Yorker named Plat
With Oden had an elegant spat.
So Odel went to Ted
And TO him Teddy said.
Well, ven have TO show Piatt wher
he's atrf
The Birmingham age-herald., 1903-08-24
DR8. DOzlER & CO'S
 MEDIco-suRoIcAL INSTITUTE, Cor. 1st ave. a 21st St.
 BIRMINGHAM, ALABAMA.

A strictly high-elass institute for the scientino treatment of all Chronic. Ner- vous, Blood. Skin. Rectal Female and 0enitc- Urinary diseases. Deformities. Tu- tnore, etiff Joints. Cancer. bupus. Malig- ,napt Uicess, hheum atism, Tuberculosis and Consumptisn.
 Hsmorvhoids. v.rfcoceie. Hernia and lyensresl dissasss sf every name. nature. form and chsrnetey are also treated. and . leRsl guarantee of cure will be given in every case.
 f Our equipment consisting of we'll tetoclssd prescription department. xRay. Violet Ray. Static and Galvano-Faradic apparatus. Super Heated Air. Arc Light Cabinet. Eureka Nsbuiiser and Ozone In- halation for nose throat and lungs and a Thoroughly equipped Surgical Depart ment. modern and up-to-date in every particular Givs us a prestige over all line of practice
 coRREsPoNpENcE INVITED. l Consultation ana examination free. Terms liberal and condolences held in- violate. offioe hours e. m. to 2 ?. n. Sundays, . a. m. te i ?. m. A FEW OF MANY ENDoRsEMENTs
 FROM THE PREse. ] The Birmingham Ledger, Drs. Desier . Co. are without doubt the best lnown specialists in the seuth. and their fame 1s due entirely to their srsat skfii, l The Birmingham Ncwsi Both nrg o. r. ana Byron Dosier are reliable and sx- perisncsd physicians and surgeons. whs deserve the great succeAs which has been and ia thefrs
 | ARe-TIsraidi Dr. Doxicvas ious staaAing land approved abilities entitis hfm to the prcud distinction of sasndfng at the he'd s6 his prsfesssun-
The Birmingham age-herald., 1903-08-24
INDUSTRIAL NEWS.

The following Philadelphia special is taken from the New York Commercial:
 James M. Swank. secretary of the American Iron and Steel association, has recently collected statistics with respect to the total annual capacity of furnaces building and to be revived. This output is estimated at 4,447,000 gross tons. Mir. Swank says that through correspondence with the owners of the principal fur naces involved. 1t has been ascertained that of the 1,972,000 tons of additional capacity credited to 1sO3 9O5.0OO tons will be for sale in the general market and 1067, GOO tons will be for the use of the makers. while of the 2,475,000 tons credi- ted to 1904, 405,O00 tons will be for the general market and 2.O7OO0O tons for the use of the makers. Of the grand total, 1,310,0OO tons, or 29.5 per cent will be for sale and 3,1S7OOO tons. of 7O5 per cent will be for the use of the makers.
 Practically all the pig iron intended for the use of the makers will be consumed In the manufacture of Bessemer and open hearth steel, while the greater por- ton of the pig iron intended for the gen. eral market. will be used in the manu- facture of iron castings. muck bars. etc.
 MT. Swank says that the annual capac- ity will soon be increased from 24sSl2, 0O0 tons in 1901 to 31.000.000 tons. It would be an impossbility for all the blast fur naces of the country to be operated at the same time. He says that under any circumstances we could make 24,0O0.000 tons next year if that quantity were needed.
 The following special comes from Bal timore:
 The Baltimore and Ohio Railroad com pany signed contracts today for 5e.O0O tons of s5-pound steel rails for 1904 delv- cry. The Carnegie company will furnish 2s,OOO tons. Cambria 12,OOO tons and the Maryland Steel company 1000 tons The latter will be manufactured at Sparrows Point. This order represents $1, 4OO. 900 at $26 per ton, the standard price for steel rails.
 The quantity ordered will be used on the 400 miles of railroad now embraced in the Baltimore and Ohio system. About the same quantity was consumed last year. This rail Is employed in replacing lighter or worn tracks. Next years sup ply will in addition be used in building several new cutoff lines to avoid grades and shorten routes between important points. It will also supply some addi- tional double tracks. This latter feature of the Baltimore and Ohio Is steadily enIarging and now over 20 per cent of it's total mileage is double tracked.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1903-08-24
JUNIOR ORDER IS
 GROWING RAPIDLY
NUMBER OF CANDIDATES MAT ED IN EAST LAKE COUNCIL-Rl- VALRY BETWEEN STEEL CITY AND EAST LAkC.

East Lake council No. Il, Junior Order United American Mechanics held their regular recent semi monthly meeting. Sev- and several more were applicants. East Lake council Is increasing in numbers and interest It is hoped by the mem- bers that this good record will be kept up until the council is the best in the state. It is said the Steel City council has pledged itself to get fifty new mem- bers by December l, 1903. East Lake has not made any pledge but the members of the council expect to do as well as Steel City.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1903-08-24
COMMITTEE WILL
 MEET AT 10 A. M.
LAWYERS TO CONSIDER CON- GEsTED CONDITION OF COURTS. SAID THAT SOMETHING MUST BE DONE AT ONCE.

The committee appointed by the mem- bers of the bar of Birmingham to con- slider the best means of remedying the congested condition of the City and Cir cult courts will meet this morning at 10 o'clock at the office of the chairman, G. R. Harsh.
 The committee consists of G. R. Harsh. S. w. John, John London, E. H. Caba- miss. Sterling A. Wood. w. H. Denson and Captain w. c. wasd.
 At the meeting held at the Circuit court room Saturday four propositions were submitted by Won L. Thompson. There are but two of the plans. however, that have any number of supporters. One of these is that the courts of the county, in- cuding the Circuit, City dwo divisions) and Chancery shall be consolidated into one Superior court of Jefferson county. and that at least one additional judge shall be provided for.
 The other plan provides simply for the creation of a third division of the City court and possibly the limiting of chan cery jurisdiction to one division.
 The attorneys all realize that some- thing must be done to relieve the situa- ton, and as the legislature meets on the first of next month to be in session for twenty-two days and then will not meet again for four years. 1t is felt that something must be definitely decided on during this week.
 The committee which meets this morn ing will report back to a meeting of the entire bar to be held next at the Cir cult court room next Thursday morning at 10 o'clock
The Birmingham age-herald., 1903-08-24
BIRDS IMPLICIT DEATH
 PENALTY ON THEIR MATES

Close students of animal nature might have discovered a peculiar example of justice had they been sitting near the pool in Capitol park yesterday morning.
 If there Is code of honor among thieves there is also a code of justice among Eng fish sparrows which frequent the trees of the park in thousands.
 Frequently people have noticed that the sparrows will all unite against one of their number and deal him a swift death for the transgression of the laws of the realm. but yesterday a new death was dealt to one of the chirpers.
 The usual death is by pecking the spar row to death with their bills First the
The Birmingham age-herald., 1903-08-24

feathers will fly, then the flesh will grad ually be pulled from the bones until the bird dies when a vital part Is touched.
 This is torture to the bird suffering the death penalty and for minutes 1t dies a slow death in great agony. Possibly it was to temper their justice with little mercy that the new method was used yes terday.
 As in other cases. some unknown law of birddom had been broken and the vio- iator must die. A number of sparrows swarmed around him, bore him to the pond in the park and there pressed his head under water until he was dead. The body was allowed to float around in the pond until rescued by a small boy.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1903-08-24
DEATHS AND FUNERALS.
Mrs. Jessie Alice Medley.

Yesterday morning at an early hour Mrs. Jessie Alice Nicely died at the res idence of her grandson. Edwin w. Finch. Mrs. Nicely was born in Lexington. Ky. and was 72 years of age at the time of her death. She was well known through out the state, being the widow of Dr. Philip P. Nicely, who at the time of his death was one of the most eloquent ministers in the Southern Methodist church. A friend of the deceased says
 Mrs. Nicely was one of the noblest characters in the world She taught in the public schools of Mobile and Bir- mingham for about twenty-five years, re- signing from the latter about seven years ago account of her health.
 ''She lived a life of service to others, dispensing joy and sunshine wherever she went. She will be long remembered by the thousands in this city who have been blessed by association with her. Her life as Christian was ideally happy, and she died as she lived. A truly noble soul has passed to the great beyond. Peace to her ashes."
 The funeral of Mrs. Neeiy will take place this afternoon at o'clock from the family residence. No 2S26 Mountain avenue. The pall-bearers will be as fol- lows:
 Active-Dr. J. H. Phillips. Prof. F. M. Roof, MT. T. c. Thompson, MT. T. O. Smith, MT. Claude Cotton and MT. S. L. Earle.
 Honorary-Mr. T. H. Moulton, MT. Frank Norris. MT. J. II. Hine. pr. James S. McLester. MT. John London. MT. w. II. Manly.
 The funeral services will be conducted by the Rev. i,r. J. B. Simpson.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1903-08-24
PARENTS OPPOSED, BUT
 THE LOVERS WERE WED

Kennedy, of 21O0 Eighth avenue, and is considered one of the prettiest young women in the city. The groom is we'll known in Birmingham, and Is employed in Gruner, Hubble & Co.'S store.
 time. The parents of the bride objected to her marrying MT. Downes on account of their ages. Love. however, triumphed over parental objections and the couple are now happy at their new home. 230S Eighth avenue, North