The Birmingham age-herald., 1903-12-27

The idea of Jeff squzzle as Santa Claus woul have tiekled an undertaken right off his hearse. Dozeville was tickled over it all right, and no wonder. You see, Jeff had grouehed along for so many years that he owned half the county, and used to stop b ythe roadside and hope so hard for the other half that he nearly blighted the crops. Every time he got hold of a cent he squeezed it so hard the Indian turned red in the face, and every time he got another thousand dollars together he shrunk up couple of inches. As Jeff wasn't much bigger than a pint of pea nuts to start with, you may imagine that he was just about the prize runt by the time he had his fortune scraped together.
 It was about this time that Dozevine got into trouble over a Santa Claus suit It was the Baptist church's turn to have the Christmas tree that year, and the womenfolks planned to have something rather fancy, being bound, of course, to get ahead of the Methodsts, who had it the year before, and the New Lights who had it the year before that. On previous years the women folks had made the San- ta Claus suit themselves, but this year they made up their minds to have a hired suit with real whiskers Squire Classy was always the Santa Claus because he was fat and had a red nose so Henry Morley took the Squires measure and sent it to the city with the order for the suit.
 Well, the time wore on, and Christmas began to get dangerously near The fancy clothes firm kept writing to Hen that, while they were rushed to death with or ders, the suit would be there on time. During the last week the women of the Baptist church all had conniption fit, and some of them two or three, but at last, on the very morning before Christ mas, Hen got the package and opened it in the presence of half the grown ups of Dozeville. It surely was a nifty suit, as 1t lay in the pink paper all velvet and fur and fancy buckles. but it looked rather small, and when Hen shook it out and held it up you could have knocked the crowd down with feather.
 Squire Classy would have had to train himself down for a hundred years to get into that suit, and the women wouldn't t wait that long. As a matter of fact not man in Dozeville, that is that any one could think of just then, could get into the thing, for it was built for a boy. The fancy clothes people had got their orders mixed up and the Baptist church women were simply sick All those present at the unpacking turned in and gave Hen enough pieces of their minds for him to have started mind factory. except that the goods would not be sa1eable. Then most of them cried and went home.
 All this time Mustapha Hadji, a weaz- ened-up little, old man who said he was from India, had stood in the back or the crowd without saying a word. Mustapha
 11I.a tftarr lc peach limb and he had done some good work, too though most people were afraid of him on account of his beady black eyes.
 ..It's no use.' said Hen. 'We couldn't get another suit here in time to save us The women folks will just have to turn in and do the best they can with home made suit We can make the whiskers out of cotton batting same as the Meth- odists done last year.
 Here comes a man who could wear the suit" put in Mustapha just then. Why don't you get him to do it?'
 Everybody looked out in front and be- gan to laugh
 .'Why man." said Squire Classy, that's Jeff Squizzle, the cuss who has spent so much of his life chasing money that he's all out of breath and can't spend any of it. You couldn't pry him into that Santa Claus suit with a crowbar.'
 'I'H bet a hundred dollars hell wear it. said Mustapha, quickly, for Jeff was turning in at the store.
 'I'll take that betr snapped Curly Benson, who bought cattle, and always carried a role of greenbacks big enough to choke a hippopotamus. Make it two hundredr said Mustapha.
 Two hundred it is!' said Curly:
 T want half pound of cracked rice" piped up Jeff Squizzle, as he entered the store, and laid down two battered cop-' pers on the counter.
 Excuse. me, sir said Mustapha, walking up to Jeff with his best bow, but l am deputized to ask you to im- personate Santa Claus at the Baptist Church Christmas tree tomorrow night.
 Jeff fairly turned yellow and turned up like he had the stomach ache. The idea of giving away all those presents gave him a cramp.
 '.What? he gasped. They'll be ask ing me for subscription next. I know 'em! I know 'em. You tell the Bap- tis church folks to mind their own bus mess. won't do it!''
 "Oh yes you willl' said Mustapha. He almost purred it like cat. and fixed his little beady eyes on Jeff 'I know you will. MT squizzle. Of course you will. See what a pretty suit they have got for you"
 He picked up the suit and stroked it, and kept his eyes on Jeff, and kept on talking in that purring tone. Jeff got uneasy at first. and nervous, then looked bewidered and hay like. and finally he walked over and picked up the suit. That seemed to settle it. He turned briskly to Mustapha.
 "All right. I'll do it." said he. Hen. I'll just go into your back room and try this suit on."
 Folks looked at each other in amaze ment. as much at the change in Jeff's voice as at anything else. He had been so close. and for so long, that he had actually got stingy with his voice, but here he was. letting it out almost as heartily as if he was getting interest on it.
 There wasn't much conversation for the next few minutes Squire Classy swore some. but the rest of them were too much astonished to say anything. They inst looked at each other and waited for the alarm clock to go off and wake them up.
 It wasn't but a few minutes until Jeff came prancing out, picture no artist