The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1903-07-19

pilot him up AL down NAH
Street a bit, before New York got
SO far ahead of him dat he couldn't
find his way to choich witout
compass.
says sure, and he asks Whisk-
ers would he chase along in de
procession. But Whiskers says
nay, nay. mo, says he. 81 has
lived half a hundred years in dis
city OF ne brit, witout knowing
any more about =. dan | needed to
find me way to me club, me bank,
me choicn and to de few teeaters
dat is not playing Fitch or rag
time. On your way" he says, I'm
satisfied. I'll leave it to strangers
in New York and curious minded
natives like you, Paul. to loin how
to travel underground, and for to
do business in balloons"
Shall we travel in me mobile,
Chames?" says Mr.. Paul.
81 pass" says. All mobiles
dat doesn't bust deirselves, busts
into de subway" says. I'D rad
der travel by hand" | says.
So we hikes out, and I passes
him up to few of de new teeatres
dat is blooming fort in de tender
loin.
Dis" | says, when we fetches
Toity-fort street, lis de Drury
Lane, climbing up into de sky; dis
on Forty-foist is to be de New
Amsterdam; and right dere,"
says, pointing little way off, on
Forty-second, lis where de same
parties is to build de Liberty; and
here on Forty-toid, is Reggie De-
Koyen's Lyric; and here on Forty
fort is de Hudson. and on Forty
fit is to be de Royal; and on
on Forty-sixt Dan Froman's new
Lyeeum and over here on Forty
mint de rev Comedy; and"
Hold on says Mr.. Paul, "You
skipped Forty-sevent and Forty
eight streets.
Give EN- time" I says. Kirk
LaShell and Billy Brady comes in
dere. Let us take de L. and go
out to Harlem, and see de two
new teealres me friends Tim Sui
Ivan and Harry Minors kid Is
running up dere," says.
No" says Mr.. Paul, tautful like,
s1et us 90 and look down in de
subway awhile, to get de twist out
of me neck got from looking up
at de tall buildings"
I'VE asn't struck de tall build
ings yet says. "'Dere's two sky
scrapers of otels going up on
Long Acre Square; and you
never seen de Ansonia, furder out
de Lane, wit twict as many rooms
as de Waldorf; and de"
mo more. No more today" says
Mr.. Paul. "Let us philosophise.
What is we coming tor"
ode subway" says. Look out
for de blasti"
81 mean what is society coming
to" he says.
SEARCH me-" I says. TITS
struck Lent already" I says, "and
Bridge whist tables is woiking
overtime"
Bridge whist won't last" says
he. Its a female" no, dat
wasn't de void he used. What's
dat? OATS it. Tanks. tits a
phemeral fad" he says, what we
imported from Lunnon, and it will
stray to de woods as soon as dere's
enough teeatres in town for ev-
erybody to get seat OATS got de
price. OATS de point; we is all
coming to de teeatre; which is to
say, we is all going to de teeatres,
elder as actors, or as audience"
I'D RAIDER deal de game" l
says, dan buy chips"
We'll" says Mr. Paul, I'VE must
all do one or de odder. Dere will
soon be so many teeatres dat we
all must be in de game. until Mr.
Edison perfects his auto-actor."
Oats a ringer on me-" l says,
'sdat auto-actor"
ITS near ready to put on de
market, says Mr.. Paul. Its to
be run by machinery, and warrant
ed make no boiler, even If de ghost
don't walk, and all de press notices
is roasts. Den will come happy
time. De critics will be graduates
of schools of engineering. De part
of Hamlet, de press notice will
say, was excellently rendered by
one of de new patterns, two and
half horse power, drop forged,
leading men, constructed on lines
invented by Mr.. Mansfield. BY
novel continuance (for which de in
ventor has patents) its exhaust Is
made to resemble de sound of en-
tusiastic applause. De power Is
directly geared to its legs, and,
when a friction clutch is turn on,
dis character can be used for buck,
and fancy-step dances, between de
acts De Ghost was played by a
high-powered, alcohol-heated, cop
per-tubed utility man, which slip
ped its eccentric pin In de battle
ment scene, and, being hastily re-
paired, de wrong stop was pulled
out, and it finished de scene wit
de lines of Rip Van Wrinkle. De
Foist Grave Digger was geared
little too high for de requirements
of de part, and trun Yorrick's skull
into de gallery causing rough
house intermezzo. Furder rehear-
sails will no doubt smood de action
in dis respect. Ophelia was
played by a low pressure, napta,
non-explosive design. invented by
May Irwin. We were not afforded
opportunity to see dis model at its
best, for in de middle of de flower
scene an unfortunate accident to
her repertoire attachment started
her to singing "All Coons Look
Alike to Me-" Dis was de result
of engaging for de part a chilled
steel. gold plated, soubrette, dat
PLAYED in Casino production last
week. Furder notice is reserved,