Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1903-09-23
SsiIlll!G


"Do you think he would accept a.
bribef" Certainly not, Il any one was
looking"
Micky-say, Jimmy, how long ID dc
circus performance? Jimmy-Oh,
about two bags Of peanuts.
She-He can't bear to have girls get
ahead of him. He-Then why doesn't
he stop running after them.
Mrs. Gaswell-The Gar OF Russia
has now four little daughters. Mrs.
Malaprop oh, the dear little Csar-
Dimes
Stella But aren't you afraid Of going
out beyond your depth? Bella-Oh. mol
All the men around here think I'm an
heiress.-Puck.
This said the young and timid
lawyer. 'is but rough draught Of
the Will" .Then.' said the old law
yer. CURLY, at needs fling"
Caroline Docs winifred expect
many wedding presents Margaret
Oh. yes; but she has no idea she will
receive as many as she expects.
Gertrude Uncle. what would you
advise me to do to find a husband
Uncle Gayboy-Let the husbands
alone. my dear. Look out for a single
man. II
Helen-I have Just refused to marry
Mr.. Gingerly. Edlth-Ohl Did he pro-
pose? Helen-Well, I can't say posi-.
lively, but that is how I construed his
incoherent remarks.
He-It Is said that many railway
engineers have real affection for their
locomotives. She-I wonder IL the To-
comotives ever reclprocate? He Ger
tainly they do. They all have tender
attachments.
"Sirr' cried Mr.. Peeksniff, indig-
nantly. show dare you accuse me OF /
such things? My reputation, sir, 4
spotless. Your reputation may be.
sir" replied the detective. 'but you're
not. We spotted you some time ago.
$50 you don't mind my piano-play-
ing, Mr.. .Skorcher p remarked Miss
Nexdore. Not at all" replied Skorch-
er. Il like 1t best when you're coast.
ing" when I'm coasting?" Eyes,
when you keep your feet OF the ped
ais. /" ll9j
Great Specialist There doesn't seem
to be anything the matter with you
organically. Have you any mental anx-
iety7 Patient Yes, have. You
must open your mind to me. WhatM
itT "Tm wondering how much You
viii charge me- f
Conclusive Briggs It's too bad
about Wrinkle apd the girl he Is en-.
gagged to. Neither Of them is good
enough for the other. Griggs- What
makes you think that? Briggs-Well.
I've been talking the matter over with
both families. Life. E.
Trouble then: Ascum-Of courss
your wife always insists upon your do
ing her biddingl Henpeck Not al
ways. Once she got mad because
did. She took me to auction with her
one day. and somehow we got to bid
ding against each other without know.
Ing Philadelphia Tress.
Wanted to have 1t over: 2 - lamma...--
said Bonnie, az there came brief
pause in the conversation ON the part
OF the callers, isn't It time for you to
ask me what I learned at the kinder.
garten today? II you don't do II pref
" soon III forget what you told me
to Chicago Tribune.
Friends of the family: II see your
neiphbors. the Hiehmores. have shut
their Immense house mn. Mrs. High.
more told me the other dry they were
going somewhere into the interior for
the summer" ..They,ye gone further
hack than that They are living In the
kitchen. Chicago Tribune.
rho commercial .sen.e. subnrh.
-, ~, -, no rar.t -. use a..
~. s...,s 81, Ests.a A.ant me-
man mi. !. the only harm n iris -.
rion and Il 4 40 situated that youl
!. car. mike twice vour mortgage interest
Nv h.y,re p.tan+ medicine advertiae,
n,erts n ru III over it-Jndre
w., 81, tIow m.nv no .bera 4,
MN sa,a, n haa,s". nn,;rsais s I,....
~ ra,. ~. :, 8. NJ M s,.t.r, snS
a;,..rt ~. t,ra ..Tbst ~ = an,v thrss s
M N,.t. =. ra,.t,va i, Mt memhs,
~ ~, M - LII, ). an, zoe ha.,. H..
". -. $3.50" .yo,,. hr ~, rha, :
ny w. 1850 .,,...at ra,. t,,an avs.
!. ~ = :. ~ IN. ph,,,nn,, :. :, =
'na - = - 80 . ..lh !. -.
= nave declus.u 70 s.uuy uen.ls'y
said the Young mau. :. =. - n.s pto.
fession; but do you think 1t would suit
your !astes. ~ sure o. !. ao9
see. I'm na.uIis q s pactlcai
joker. oon : pelese : M H,' enJoy
anytnins more .nan y M nan
NOUN WIN EuDUcEs ulUEACs 1iuS III.