Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1903-09-05

| during the course of a single year Is fpcalS
culable- Md yet they're making kindline
| pool rooms, at one end of Greater New
York and sending battalions and brigades
| OF cops to police and protect the horse
gambling grounds at the other end of New
YORK, without which. as a matter OF fact,
the pool rooms would not be possible.
After all, there's something in these
plasts OF the discontented ones about the
INEQUALITIES and the Inconsistencies of the
law.
A Tide of Gush.
During these past few weeks we have
been RECALLED with an interminable tide Of
gush anent what has been said and done by
SIR THOMAS guests on board the Erin. The
lean and grouchy-looking Countess OF Cak-
kyack said this, the haw-haw-ing Ri Hon.
Plum-Dur said that the tuft-hunting Mrs.
Squirmen Crawl of the four hundred did
this to the (apparenD delight OF Sir Tom.
the groveling HOWE Lovealord OF the
Larchmont set did that to extract a short
Gackle OF approval from the gloomy browed
Earl OF Nodough. 1t has been all very de
Verting, truly and the shop girls on their
way DOWNTOWN on the cars In the morning.
nave been all eyes. devouring It. In no
city on earth are these garish accounts OF
toadyism and fummery moro wolfshly
gobbled up than in New York
But several things happened on board the
Erin during the yacht races that the hubI
dubbists didn't say andything about. For
one thing. the Irish baronet's Yacht was
overrun. during at least the first three con-
tests. by 1mpudent nobodies of whom the
owner OF the yacht had never even heard.
The number of unlimited guests who flock.
ed over the Erin was startling even for
this community, where folks don't think
anything OF putting into weddings, and wed.
ding receptions, and wedding breakfasts,
and pink teas, and card parties. and balls,
and so on, notwithstanding the fact that
tney We never been introduced to the pers
YNh fnyr
avenue wedding reception last year the
headquarters detectives who We're assigned
to cover the proceedings rounded up and
corralled no less than ninety-five WE'LL
dressed women of the butting-in species
ana couple dozen alleged male persons Of
the same tribe. whose countenances had
never up to the hour OF the reception been
even beheld by the parties in interest"
and 1t assuredly was a queer sight to sea
the big. hefty plain-clothes cops dumping
this aggregation OF brazen ones down the
steps and into the street.
Sir T. Upton didn't think, in issuing IN
vltationS to folks whom he wanted to have
with him on his boat while his sailing Yacht
was being walloped. that It would be neces-
sary for him to mail each of the invited
persons large red ticket Of admission.
with a seat coupon duly attached. He
simply informed the invited ones that his
messenger boat would be at a certain dock
at a certain hour to carry them to the Erin.
This was the opportunity for the tough-
cutfcled crowd OF slammers-in to have the
time OF their lives. and many Of them
hiked down to the dock and clambered
aboard of the messenger boat to be con.
Veyed on to the waiting Erin that the mes
senger boat had a list to port or starboard.
and was In imminent danger Of turning
turtle every trip she made. At first Sir
THOMAS was SO busy on the bridge Of the
Erin watching the Reliance make the
Shamrock look like mud scow In the dol.
drums that he didn't have time to size up
his punches of unlimited guests, and thus
they had ample opportunity to gobble up
the luncheon dishes and to swill Sir
Thomas champagne without mourning any
danger of detection.
But toward the wind-up. when Sir
Thomas perceived the futility Of even
in point of fact the Irishman began I'd
wear that disconsolate whats-the-use cir,
try as cheerily as he would to screen It,
he got his binocular, SO to speak, on lunches
and patches Of the shameless fntruders OF
both sexes. and when he started In to give
them the run be did the Job up In a work.
manlike manner. He deputized the officers
Of the Erin to attend to the Job. but he
kept an overseeing eye upon 1t himself,
and the fntruders were "beacheG' without
any ceremony whatever.
In addition, there was so much thieving
going on on board. the Erin during the
races that the craft was all but Quilted Of
its loose cabin gear. The thieving can't be
imputed entirely to the unlimited guests,
missed after the unlimited euests had been
shooed Off the ship. leaving only invited
guests on board. as before. There weren't
enough spoons and knives and forks left
to spread mess-gear on the Erin at the
wind-up Of last week, and the thieves
didn't stop at cribbing anything they
thought they could carry away with them
water jugs, salt cellars. napkins. flags,
vases. cups and saucers. even the very
cushions from the lounging rooms. Sir
Thomas guests nominally. II not actually,
steam yacht will have to be reltted with
small gear from stem to stern before she
goes back to the other side. 1t Is con-
servatively estimated that the thieves in
thigh life." as the contributors to the pages
Of the Hearthstone Pal express It. got
away with several thousand dollars worth
of their genial hosts property. And yet g
woman with five starving children was sent
to the Island for ninety days not long ago
for swiping couple Of rolls from the back
Of bakers wagon.
Still Find It Easy,
Just as long as the ultra-sophisticated
population of New York continues to in
crease In wisdom and foxiness. so long will
the cheerful grafters who need the money
continue to get 1t, and get 1t easy" A
young man Of oleaginous manner and mel
nfluous speech sold lot OF yellow birds at
So the throw to Harlem fat wives a week
or so ago. He told EN- that the yellow
rene, straight from the Canary Islands,
and he added, in mysterious whisper,
that he had smuggled the birds into this
country to avoid the payment Of the LOCO
per cent duty which (said hep this country
had placed upon song birds. He told the
credulous fat wives that they'd better not
battle the birds for few days, until the
singers had become acclimated." By tell<
ing them this he was enabled to work the
district thoroughly from one end of 1t to
the other. selling something like 800 OF the
yellow birds.
Two or three days ago some Of the pur,
chasers Of the lovely yellow birds from the
Canary Islands gave the fiuttering creaA
lures their first baths. Then the yellow
paint began to come OF the birds in
splotches and hunks. When thoroughly
soused and washed the birds were found
by their chagrined owners to be English
sparrows Of the common or asphaltum,
-of-the-road variety, and now there
are some 300 empty bird cages up In Har-
lem that some enterprising dealer in such
truck will be able to buy for little or MOTH
ing. c. L C.