The Elbert County tribune., 1903-11-26


q * & men whose stock in trade
& consists of an important
&xN,ekxx manner and n positive
voice. Billy Hartley was a
private detective and business was bad
with him. He had gradually nursed
himself into a state of mind where he
believed that the world did not appre-
ciate him. When n man so believes,
the plot invariably begins to thicken
into an ominously fatal sort of stew.
One day as Billy sat in his room at
the "Grupelli' apartment house, he
peeled the following little sweet po-
tato of thought and threw it into the
simmering saucepan of his ambitional
thought:
Il must bring my detective ability
before the public in a way which Will
make n marked impression" said he.
He chopped up logical turnip or
two, and thoughtfully stirred them in.
1.-THE public does not bring me its
private cases and so 1 cannot prove my
worth" he continued. Il must there
fore fix up case myself. Now there
are a lot of robberies going on in this
neighborhood. and the police seem help
less. Why can't l whirl in and catch
these thieves?'
Billy Hartley communed with him
self until he began to hate his own
company.
by the Great Guns of War. have
itr' he finally exclaimed.
He wrote the following note:
Dear Sir-If your representative
will be at the corner of Broadway and
Eighth street tonight Mt - o'clock
will hand him 500 as agreed. He
must have this letter to identify him.
and the signal will be a sneeze."
Billy Hartley sealed this note. ad-
dressed it to himself. and placed it on
conspicuous part of his bureau. On
the envelope he added the words:
"Valuable. In haste"
Billy Hartley tiptoed to the window
and cautiously peered out. "Oh. il
the burglars would only call here and
find that letter." he murmured implor-
ingly.
Billy Hartley tiptoed to the door and
listened intently. They'd go for the
500 and then we'd nab them sure"
he continued. in n sibilant whisper.
"why, it would make me famous"
Billy Hartley picked up his hat and
opened the door. He shook an omin-
Gus finger with a warning gesture for
absolute silence and disappeared.
The worlds a stage. Up in one of
the boxes sat Dame Fortune intelli-
gently following Hartley's little side
play.
Now I'll just help this worthy young
man." remarked the Dame to herself,
and she settled costly down to see this
thing through.
The worlds stage. The actors are
ready. The prompter is at hand. The
stringed instruments in the orchestra
are shivering out their trembliest mu-
sic and n thrilling detective mystery
rapidly begins to unfold itself.
1t was night. The stars shone bright.
Jimmy Short and Gus Simmons. at
tired in irreproachable evening dress.
wended their devious way up West
Forty sixth street. They had an utter
disregard of the fight of the crow.
Their faces were bathed in an efful
gent happiness. Their gestures were
of the heroic size. They had all the
enviable appearances of having dined
to the tuneful accompaniment Of corks
that pop and tinkling glass.
Occasionally Jimmy was stricken
with convulsion of apopletlc merri-
ment. "Isn't 1t easyT' he whispered
to his companion at these times.
Its almost too easy" replied Gus,
wagging his head in a reflective man
ner
The Bacchanallan procession of two
stopped in front of the "GrupeIli."
They ascended the steps. One of them
! lurched inside. The other sat down
on the door step and softly wept as
he unlaced his shoes. A sophisticated
policeman smiled indulgently as he
passed.
But now behold a curious thing. The
/ method and manner of the reveller
who had lurched inside suddenly
changed. His jag fell from him even
as mantle. He rapidly entered all the
darkened rooms that were unlocked
and rapidly came out again. In short
time he reappeared at the street door
and resumed his correct imitation of n
man on bat. He locked arms with
his watching companion on the steps
and, striking up the chaste measure
of merry roundelay, they continued
where they disappeared.
In the Great Comedy of Life 1t is
the accepted fact that one man In his
time Plays many parts. but 1t may