davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Starkville news. (Starkville, Miss.) 1902-1960, 1903-03-20
HUMOROUS


Soubrette-''I'm looking for a po-
sition to sing" Manager-"Did you
ever sing for money before?' Sou
brette-"No; only for spite. De
trOit Free Press.
Lady Caller Ito old family servant)
well, Bridget, did Master Arthur
shoot any tigers in India?'' Bridget
-"Of coorse he did. Shure we have
the horns of the craythurs hung in
the hall!"-Punch
Giggs-'Don't you think you can
hear exceptionally well in the new
lecture halle" Biggs-''It ought to
have some redeeming feature; you
can't sleep in a single seat with
out being seen by the lecturer" =
Harvard Lampoon.
Uncle John-'Tm glad to hear you
say you've got such nice teacher
Willie-"Yes; she's the best ever
Uncle John-"That's right" Willie
Eyes, she gets sick every other week
or so, an there amt no school. -
Philadelphia Press.
Wise Mamma.-'I don't like that
young man COulSlH DluouS way VI
speaking of wealth." said Mrs. Cum
rox. "But that shows his generous
and superior nature" POSSIBLY, in
his case But it ordinarily indicates
shat man hasn't any."-Washington
Star.
The Whole Truth.-Papa Severely
-"Did you ask mamma if you could
have that apple?' Five-Year-O1d-
"Yes, papa" Papa-"Be careful now.
Do not tell a story. Did you ask
mamma?' Five -Old-"Papa. L
asked her. CA pause.) She said [
couldn't have it," = Philadelphia
Ledger.
Enlightened by the Speaker.-Some
one had moved 'to strike out the en-
actment clause of a bill, and the
new member who hadn't a chance to
say anything on the house floor as
vet ''butted in with: "Mr. Speaker.
if adopted what condition will it
leave the bill in?'' Speaker Hender-
son beckoned for the congressman to
approach the rostrum and whispered:
"Just as if it hadn't was.'-Baltimor
Herald.
The Starkville news. (Starkville, Miss.) 1902-1960, 1903-03-20
Were No Use.

The minister was expecting a few
visitors that evening, and remembering
the greenness of his servant personally
looked after the arrangements for the
few light refreshments he was to serve
his guests. Among other things he
cracked a big bowl of nuts and placed
them on the buffet. When the prop
er time came for passing around his
little feast he missed the nuts. Being
wise man, he said nothing at the
time. When the company had gone,
however, he interviewed the green
servant.
'.Nora, what did you do with those
nuts I cracked?" he asked.
"Shure an I doan know wot yer
mean," said Nora.
"Yes, you do, too," he said, sternly.
"Those nuts / put on the buffet"
''Oh, is that wot yer mean? Well,
sor, they was no good. They was all
cracked up, and threw 'em in tn fire."
Chicago Chronicle.
The Starkville news. (Starkville, Miss.) 1902-1960, 1903-03-20
SCHOOL AIT CHURCH.

Gen. o. O. Howard is happy over
the completion of a 100000 endow-
ment fund for the Lincoln Memorial
university al Cumberland Gap, Tenn.
for which he has been pleading in
many cities
The Roumanian minister of public
instruction, Spiru Haret, has ad-
dressed note to all school inspec-
tors in the country complaining OF
the luxury i'll dress among female
teachers He directs the inspectors
strongly to recommend all teachers
to adopt the national costume, the
peasants dress of their special vii
lage.
In addition to the collection of old
junk from private houses the Saliva
tion Army colony in London is now
Systematically gathering Up waste
paper. Nearly 5000 tons of this ma
terial was collected last year, sort
ed, and resold, nearly 1000 business
houses being visited every week
The colony now gives employment to
500 men simply in recovering mate.
rals that would ordinarily be de-
stroyed.
Chicago asserts that it has the
largest school which is situated in
the largest parish in the world. The
parish is that of ST. Stanislaus Kost-
ka in the Polish settlement. The
number of persons connected with
the church is said to be, roughly
speaking, $4,000 The annual attend
ance at the parish school is 1000 and
the present attendance is $500. the
yearly entering class being about
900 and the yearly graduating class
about 750.
DIR. Edward Everett Hale addressed
the Mothers and Fathers club Of
Boston a day or two ago. He star
tied his audience somewhat by say
ing: Tenement houses, some II
stories high, packed with people and
causing all kinds of tenement house
laws to be made, are as wicked as
hell" He expressed the hope that
in a hundred years from now there
would be no great cities. What we
want" said the orator, sis to 1nlti-
ate our children to live in the open
air. to grow to love the country, so
that they can know the difference be-
tween a turnip and potato and be-
tween grass and hemlock. When this
has been brought about we will have
been converted from the miserable
mechanical machine life we are now
living"
The Starkville news. (Starkville, Miss.) 1902-1960, 1903-03-20
CATCHING REDSNAPPERS.
1t May Not R equire Any Great Amor unit
of skill, But There LIS Lots
of Fun In 1t.

With sunlight on the little waves,
soft breeze blowing, good boat an
chored over a submerged bank. slip
pers on bare feet, canvas trousers
belted about the waist, thin shirt,
wide straw hat on the head and long
black cigar in the mouth, man with
nothing to do but fish is reasonably
we'll fixed off the Texas coast these
days-say down about Brownsville
way, or even further south along the
queer edge of Mexico, says the New
York Sun.
There is nothing of the tarpon about
the red snapper. He does not run and
leap and fight and give man paralysis
of the wrist for week, but he is good
to eat, which the tarpon is not; he
calls for no unusual exertion of mus
Gle or intellect, and he bites, when he
bites at all, with a readiness which
makes catching him continuous per-
formance. more beautiful fish does
not swim is he comes flashing through
the green waves he looks like bar of
blood.
Red snappers are caught in dozens.
twenties, hundreds, by parties who go
out to have good time of it. The cat
boat is sailed from 20 to 40 miles down
the coast until the bank is reached.
This bank does not differ in any way
from : Goldfish bank, except that the
water on it is much shallower, from
six to Is feet. The boat is anchored
above the bank, no storms are feared
and fun begins.
Hand lines are used with heavy lead
en- sinkers on one end and three hooks
on smells above it two feet apart. The
hooks, big ones, are baited with bits
of mussels, Or shrimp, or mullet, or.
in fact, any sort of meat fish would
be likely to care for.
Sometimes the snappers, though
about in thousands, get the nosing hab-
it and merely push the bait aside with
out paying further attention to it.
When that happens there is nothing
tbsdo but -Wait or .rg Fs2ther hank.
or play poker during the outing. Most
often they are hungry, however, and
there is no dilatoriness about them.
They seize bait as soon as it is with
in reach and start off with it.
With six men in the party and each
of them handling two lines, they will
all be kept busy for an hour or more.
Then the fishing will slacken as the
day gets older, and it is time for mid
day dinner anyhow. The snapper
weighs from four to six pounds and
does not, of course, put up anything
of a fight against a handline with a
15O-pound man at the other end.
Doubtless some sport could be had
from the snapper with a very light rod
and light tackle, but no one has tried
it. Snapper fishermen for the nonce
do not care much about sport. They
care for plenty of fish which shall aft
erward be broiled or made into de-
liehtful court-bouillon, for the free
soft air and the beautiful seascape,
the sail down to the bank and the sail
home in the dark, when every man of
them has reached stage where he
thinks he can sing.
The Starkville news. (Starkville, Miss.) 1902-1960, 1903-03-20
What Did She Mean?

They were at supper. Between
the courses the young man with the
voracious appetite discoursed elo-
ouently on things in general.
''Do you know, Miss DASH he re-
marked, 81 think there is a very inti-
mate relation between our food and
our character. I believe, don't you
knew, that we grow like what we are
fond Of"
The fair girl smiled sweetly.
sHow interesting!" she murmured,
s.May / pass you the ham, Mr. Jones2
I am sure you will like it,"
And the young man relapsed into
deep thought.-Londan Answers.
The Starkville news. (Starkville, Miss.) 1902-1960, 1903-03-20

in
of demanded
with 25
allowed it
Niagara frontier that
island January 49, 1885, the sacrifice Of
eandp tangible result
The Starkville news. (Starkville, Miss.) 1902-1960, 1903-03-20
- -
Cold mud CHlculafin,

She hesitated and asked for little
time for consultation.
''Why, certainly he said. There
is no hurry about this matter. If
you desire to consult your parents
''Don't. you believe it for moment" )"
she interrupted firmly. Il want to
consult Bradstreets."
And he threw up the sponge and
went out into the nightly. Y. Her
aid.
The Starkville news. (Starkville, Miss.) 1902-1960, 1903-03-20
a veritabYe sen.ation.

.Oh! there goes Mildred and that
duke to whom she has engaged her
self. And there is the greatest SEN
sation about it in to-day's papers,
ssMercy! What do they say?'
'.That he is real duke. .'-Detroit
Free Press.
The Starkville news. (Starkville, Miss.) 1902-1960, 1903-03-20
Employs Woman Drive

DR.. Sarah Barney, Of Franklin, N.
H., employs a woman~to drive her
carriage. The woman was a con-
sumptiye patient, whom the outdoor
life has completely cured. Incident
ally she has become an excellent
driver.
The Starkville news. (Starkville, Miss.) 1902-1960, 1903-03-20
An Ivory Watch.

A watch has been made entirely
of ivory by Henri Houriet, of Chaux-
le-Fonds, Switzerland. Works, hands
and case were all made out of an old
billiard ball The watch keeps good
time.-Ns Z. Sup
The Starkville news. (Starkville, Miss.) 1902-1960, 1903-03-20

BY putting aside their weekly pence
the school children of Atlanta, Ga,
have saved enough to purchase an
elephant for the local zoo.-Indian-
apolis News.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1903-07-25
AMONG SALT LAKE
WAVES ALL NIGHT
Two Men and Women Go in Bathing
and One Will Never Return.

SALT LAKE CITY, Utah.
July 24.-Bruised from head to
foot and delirious from all
night buffeting with the waves of
Great Sale Lake, Roslyn Wells was
found today lying on the rocks hun
dred feet from shore of Antelope ISL
and. The body of his companion, Roy
Larkin. aged fifteen years, has not
been found.
Wells and Larkin. with Wells sis
ter-in-law, Miss Pomeroy, went in
bathing yesterday afternoon at Saltair.
They waded far out until deep water
was reached. A strong breeze sprang
UP and when they attempted to re-
turn, Larkin, who was unable to swim,
could make no Roadway. Miss Pom
etoy reached the pavilion. but rescu-
ing parties were unable to find any
trace of Wells and Larkin. Wells said
he had lost Larkin about 8 o'clock this
morning. after having supported him
all night.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1903-07-25
MEN IN RANKS ASK
OFFICERS REMOVAL
Continued From First PAGE

in the carnival parade next week, but
it is understood that there is a move
on foot among the members of the bat
terry to refuse toe march, providing
Capt. Larson is in command. Another
objection to marching: in the military
parade made by the, battery is that
they are expected to march on foot and
without sidearms. They contend that
so long as they are a battery they
should be furnished with the proper
equipment.
Maj. Lambert in some manner learn
ed of the fact that the battery mem
bers We're circulating a petition which
practically asks for the removal of
Capt. Larson, and last night after the
guard drill a meeting of the officers
was called by Maj Lambert, at which
the action is said to have been dis
cusSed in secret. Just what action will
be taken is not known, but unless
Capt. Larson is removed it is stated on
good authority that the battery will
not be in the military parade.
The fact that Capt. Larson ordered
his men to go across the river and fire
a salute of welcome to President
Roosevelt upon the occasion of his re-
cent visit to the city, when they had
expected to be in the line of march, did
not tend to make Capt. Larson more
popular with his men, many of whom
considered it an insult to the battery
to cut them out of the parade and
place them on the hill across the river.
where they had no opportunity what
ever to be seen.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1903-07-25
LIQUIDATION IN
STOCKS DOES NOT
DARKEN TRADE
Feeling in West and Southwest
Continues observation-disclosures.
trial Conditions in Disturbed
Centers Improve Visibiy.

NEW YORK, July 24.-Bradstreets
tomorrow will say: Stock market liqui-
dation at the expense of industrials af-
feCtS sentiment and ignores but does
not conceal improvement in the corn
and cotton crop, a change for the bet
ter in industrial conditions at New
York and other disturbed centers. and
q continued cheerful feeling in West
ern and Southwestern trade circles.
The markets for the cereals also re-
fleet selling, but here the moving fea-
ture is the good crop advices at home
and abroad and the pressure of the eX-
celIent quality of the new wheat ar
rivals. The iron and steel markets and
those for other metals feel the reflex
action of depression in securities and
buying is closely restricted even with
dropping values, while the bulls in cot
ton have given nearby months and
spot cotton another twist on which rec
ord prices have been recorded, thus
rendering the position of manufacture
ers still more unsatisfactory. Strike
troubles are reported the cause of dull
ness in Eastern lumber markets and
the embarrassment of some large build
ing concerns. The shoe trade East and
West seem to be in an exceptionally
good position, Western houses having
all they can do, while Eastern shoe
shipments are in advance of all pre-
viOus records. Railway earnings are
exceptionally good, showing a gain of
IS per cent for the first half of July.
Trade reports are in harmony with
crop advices.
The partial ending of the building
strike at New York leads to hopes of
better business, while the strike in
Philadelphia is weakening. Savings
bank balances at New York are re-
ported to have been decreased by
necessities of striking mechanics.
Symptoms of improvement in textile
demand are reported at New York.
Wool is firmer at the East, as manu-
facturers enter the market to cover
sales of goods for spring delivery.
which are improving. Eastern shoe
shipments are "a per cent larger than
this week year ago and Is per cent
ahead for the season. Anthracite coal
is active and shipments are large.
Wheat including flour, exports for
the week aggregate 2.7S1,988 bushels,
against 1862 784 bushels last week, and
3.980.9 69 bushels last year. For three
weeks of the cereal year they aggre-
gate S.S15,1S2 bushels, against 1850
800 bushels in 1902.
Corn exports for the week aggre-
gate 1,501,338 bushels. against 1.402. 440
bushels last week and 1851 bushels a
year ago. For three weeks of the pres
ent cereal year they aggregate 4,42S, S25
bushels, against 395.421, bushels in 1902.
Business failures in the United
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1903-07-25
CAME DOWN FROM
$4,000 TO $4,000
AIieaed Price of New York Stonecut
ters for Settling Strike.

NEW YORK, July 24.-Counsel for
Lawrence Murphy, the former treas
urer of the Stonecutters' union, now on
trial charged with appropriating the
organizations funds. continued his
novel line Of defense before Judge
Newburger today, in dragging from
each witness admissions as to meth
DDS used by the Journeymen Stonecut-
ters' union in extorting money from
employers.
Donald Call. formerly president of
the union, testified that the secret
committee had demanded $4,000 from
the Brooklyn stone dealers to settle the
strike of 1902, and that 100000 might
have been demanded. AS a compromise,
the committee agreed to accept $4,000,
which was paid.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1903-07-25
HARNEY'S FAMOUS
DECISION Is UPSET
Montana Supreme Court Acts in Min
ME HeaIy Mine Case.

HELENA. Mont, July 24-The de-
cision of Justice Harvey. of Butte. re-
fusing a new trial il. the Minnie Healy
case, was reversed by the Mon
tana supreme court today and the case
remanded. The litigation involves
mining property worth $4,000, 900 or
more. The reversal s,was based upon
charges of MISCONDUCT made against
Judge Harvey and upon the merits of
the case.
The supreme couFt also modified the
order of survey granted to Heinze in
the Nipper case and denied a motion
filed by Heinze and attorneys to draw
the certified check for $3.50 filed as
a bond in the Minnie Healy case from
the Daily bank and trust company.
BUTTE, Mont. July 24.-Because of
the absence of D. Gayslavers. an i'm
pOrtant witness of the defense, the
Shores case was postponed today until
Sept. 8, upon consent of both parties.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1903-07-25
PORTO RICO CHURCH
MATTER SETTLED
Towns Cede Municipal Rights
i'm Church Buildings to
Catholics.

SAN JUAN, P. R.. July 24.-All the
municipal rights in the church build
ing of Guayama, Arroyo and Salinas
have been coded by the municipal au-
thorities of those towns to the
Catholic church. The question of the
ownership of the Catholic church
buildings has been disputed ever since
the United States took over the island.
Spain, under the old regime, claimed
title to the edifces, which. however.
were maintained out of the municipal
funds.
The action taken by the municipal
authorities of these three towns fol-
lows the lines recommended by Gov.
Hunt, and it is believed that the same
policy will prevail throughout the ISL
and, thus settling this disturbing ques-
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1903-07-25
ACCUSED POSTMISTRESS
ESCAPES FROM JAIL
Mrs. Mckee, of Ireland, Makes a Hook
From a Pail Handle. i.

DETROIT. Mich. July 24.-Mrs. Ellen
Mckee. who was under arrest on the
charge OF embezzing s. 500 from the Brit
ish government while she was poStmiStresS
of the substation of furthermore, suburb
of Belfast, ireland. nine months ago and
who was arrested near the Windsor (OntD
postoffice last Tuesday escaped from
Sandwich Jail last night She was given
the freedom of the jail yard last night and
climbed a 15-fOot wall with the assistance
of a hook she made from a pail han
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1903-07-25

on account of his electioneering for
Cardinal Gibbons is pronounced I'M
true. The fact is that Mgr. OConnell
came to Rome only to present his re-
port on the condition of the university
over which he presides. Finding the
pope at the point of death, he merely
submitted verbal report to Cardinal
Satolli, who, as project of the congre-
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1903-07-25

States for the week number 1873.
against 17S last week and lib in the
like week of 1902. In Canada for the
week they were 20, as against 10 last
week and 16 year ago.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1903-07-25
Bow Murderers Stranded.

LEXINGTON. KY, July 24-CIaude
O Brien and Earl Whitney, both aged
seventeen. were hanged here today for the
murder Of a. 3. Chnn. a wealthy mer-
chant
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1903-07-25

CATION of studies, has the university
under his jurisdiction. Then, with the
full permission of Cardinal Satolli,
Mgr. OConnell left for a holiday trip
of a month He intends to return to
Rome after the election of the new
pope.
California Quake5.
SAN FRANCISCO, Cal, July PA
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1903-07-25
Canada.
Totals. Can. $50. OO1. POS II o -.

*Not included in totals because contain
ing other items than clearings *&NOt in
Guided in totals because of no comparison
for last year.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1903-07-25
BANK CLEARINGS.
Weeks Showing of Financial institutions
of eadtno Cities

NEW YORK. July 24.-The follow
ing table. compiled by Bradstreet,
shows the bank clearings at the
principal cities for the week ended July
%. with the percentage of increase and
decrease as compared with the CORE
SDOnding week last wear:
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1903-07-25

sharp earthquake shock was felt in the
central part OF North California today,
but no damage was done
. n. 81 TT y r IA.
Baarstb. n The Kind You Have Always BOugh
Signature al N@xH2NzzMg
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1903-07-25
Conclave to Meet Aug. I.

The congregation of cardinals has
not yet decided whether the note
which the sacred college intends to
address to the powers concerning the
situation Of the papacy at Rome shall
be presented tomorrow. when the re-
ception of the diplomatic body occurs
The diplomats will be presented by M.
The Intermountain Catholic. (Salt Lake City [Utah] ;) 1899-1920, 1903-08-01
WOMAN'S WORLDS

fNs,
ttSp ,u 1T, taking care NOT "a brao,.
60 ~ suiiIace' yet taking care al the
Ie Tine TO make it even and smooth
i,,a you work Slowly, gently and With
!uusileht you can make tho me- &c
issue paper look almost as y.elt ~ -
s,,- "LieH IL was fresh Not unite &c
L Sii.ol, perhaps, but certainly mucb
o,-..t lhan 1t did when it was deanI,.
:. .l lpled and creased. So with tho a.,
wonders -, VI cuCc'e. You can do
"g p with il. if you work. carefully
Fnyslcal culture for the neck ana
9leouluers consists largely of exercises
Learn to hold your head up. vo,,r cbi,,
ana 10 carry your shoulders hack
- would be a good thing for every
!" oiiidh VINO wants nice shoulders r.
She could learn to hold her shoulders
OUT and keep them flat and wide. mi
d most excellent thing if she could
hands. anu
The girl who would learn phvsica1
culture of the face must include a right
carriage of the head. And how MANY
KNOW how to carry the head properly?
How many can control the chin as If
Should be controlled?
mere was once red haired girl who
was thin in the face and long in the
neck. She had irregular teeth. and her
eyes, though tender in expression. were
neither large nor expressive. bing
pale blue. But her lirs were a good
shape and she knew how to use Them
The Intermountain Catholic. (Salt Lake City [Utah] ;) 1899-1920, 1903-08-01
LETTERS AND ANSWERS

Mrs. G.. II. Green-I would like to Sc
cure a good hair tonic.
Use one ounce of bisulphide of uuiu-
inc, one-half ounce of salt three
lourths of an ounce of borax, and one
pint of water Apply to the scalp in
me morning with a sponge. Let dry
before putting UP the hair.
Miss X.-What can l do for A face
mat is badly chapped and is peeling?
Anoint at night with a pure. cold
cream. In the morning remove with
ot7water, gently. But use no soap at
present.
John T.-My face is covered with
pimples. Some are so deep that they
leave scars. Is there any cure for
them?
Carbolated -vaseline will cure some
forms of pimpled face. You can get
1t at the drug store.
Maude-My skin is unpleasantly
rough. Kindly give treatment
Your skin requires a healing cream.
Wash your face at night before going
TO bed with warm water and bland
soap Dry the face gently with soft
towel and rub a good witch hazel
cream we'll into the skin. Remove in
the morning with warm water. and a
little soap, if necessary. If you have
lost the recipe for witch hazel cream,
write for it.
Reader-My face is rough and pim-
pied. | need something to make it
smooth.
Fresh rye -four 15O grams; powdered
marshmalloWs. IS grams: powdered
violets. 70 grams; powdered dextrine,
Is grams. Make into a paste with
warm water.
Mrs. X.-How can l reduce my
weight? l am a great deal too heavy.
To you and to others that have writ
ten there is nothing to be advised ex
cept my regular obesity treatment
Mrs. Henry j. M.-Please do not en-
close money. The advice in this col
umn is entirely free. Send self
addressed stamped envelope if you
want a private reply. But no money.
A letter was received enclosing u
stamped envelope without an address
upon it, 1t is impossible to reply I'M
less the envelope is plainly addressed
and stamped.