New-York tribune., 1903-03-30
NOTES FROM THE CAPITAL
,Hr rEtseHApH TO TIE rArsUNz.l

A PowERFUL INDUCENENT.-Secrttary ROOF
,vas asked the other day II he had not made mis-
take ir deciding not 20 accompany President hooss-
welt on the latters trip in the West He said ne
1voula IKE 20 20, but 1t was impossible news
raper man present Jokngiy referred TO the remote
ness of some parts OF thai big reserve from Ine
civilized world why. Mr.. Secretary" the news
paper man suggested. don't you know that by not
Rons to the Yellowstone you are missing one ~
the greatest opportunities Of your life? You Touo
ss out of the Fsfeh fepsG S1 sse heaa the
branch Of the government II had not ioOSS SiTk ri
in that light esfors- II that is true '"''A
have to reconsider
LEARNED THE LESSON wELIA-when Rob
srt q Armstronz the new Assistant Secretary OF
the Treasury. working for MS ooAro anu
clothes on a little paper in Anes. Iowa ne iear'eu
his first lesson in 'stfck-to-it-iveness One morh-
ing at breakfast. satisfy an impatient appeuee.
he reached eagerly with his fork for plate or not
cakes He had overcaIcuatod thu length OF LIE
arm and failing 60 land the prize, sat oack anu
awaited his turn Don't let any one help MN .
hot cakes, said his proprietor and tnen, S1
dressing Mr Armstrong; ne aooso hing get IT,
HE BIAzEp THE wAY-Miton E. Allies. AS
sistant Secretary OF the Treasury. atnousn
young man. believes himself to be pioneer IN 'i'H'
he has through his life Just preceded labor SAVING
reforms He sat industrfously signing M T.
AHes~ to several thousand Treasury warrants
which is one of the daily duties Of each OF the AS
s1s:ant Secretaries "a pleasant task was re-
TO scratch his name without interruption; do you
know often think that am destined to get the
worst OF things all my life? For instance,
believe that IL I were TO leave the Treasury the
first thing that would happen would be to designate
some clerk 90 sign these warrants. 1 have been
signing them every day since became Assistant
Secretary. But II has always been my luck TO JUST
precede reform When I q small boy we
burned wood and coal at house. 1t was my
duty to cut and split and bring in all the WOOD.
Just as I LEFT home and was preparing TO gloat
over my younger brother upon whom l saw thls
wood splitting mantle falling. they discovered
F gas od near and our eoa pace orer Sn1 have got
e he better ct e IN a1d 1he he has just as
many warrants TO sign as have.
WAS HE THE I.AST7-President Tucker or
Dartmouth College is made the victim Of one of the
best Jokes of the season by story told by one or
his closest friends. now in the city couple Oh
summers ego the college president spent part OF
the heated farm up in the northern
mart Of Vermont It was delightful place. but
the classical visitor found that even that haven OF
rest had drawbacks. As the following suHl-
-ner approached DR.. Tucker again bethought him.
self Of the quiet farm place OF summer re1use
and wrote TO the farmer: s'Your place is we'll
spring Of delight: ii Is picturesque comforSaoie'
hnrneuke- The house is we'll kept the table worthy
or the highest commendatior and. in short. every
thing save two features. is conducive to utmost
rstisfsction These exceptions the kitchen
methods of your hired girl and. second. the fact
that the pen in which you maintain your swine is
located in too close proximity 10 the house IL
these exceptions were eliminated il would be a
source Of the most profound pleasure ioT hie 'o
again Jon you Ted ms me note and anxious to
again have the distinguished hoarder with him.
!1ear Mr. Tucker: Yours reed and I hasten TO
EsRy s. we vent oe and sIad there 70 have not been any
Hogs on the place since you left last summer.
a COMMITTEE AWARD IN THE SENATE
IN fhe selection of chairmen for Senate committees
much courtesy is displayed. and. although the
members Of the party in power secure the most
coveted places. minority members are not wholly
overlooked At the beginning OF the last session
Senator Racon's name was considered for several
committees He ought TO have some very serious
work said one Senator. for he is comedian In
poltios" Come to think of it observed another
Senator. L never heard the senior Senator from
Georgia make Joke. Whatever committee we
him i is osipty that has 4f x he mot not sense o
lunoro asked the Senator In the % enair ~ have ne
St." said tbs chairman; Il suggest that We appoint
woman sufraxe. and amid laughter the appoint
was made unanimous.
A BARGAIN AT s. sea-The Commissioner of
Pensions long ago wrote to a man in a
Western town, asking for information about a vet
eran IN connection with g. claim pending in the
bureau. The reply has just reached Washington
and will form part and parcel OF the bureau ar
chfves The bureaus informant was ready to give
all the information Uncle Sam wanted. but went
fur1her
ished the employees handling the case He wrote:
hss5 h DO s no s ware 3nF hi ss s ii o Kat R es m
worth Kan.). He war right smart sick de las time
hts hade Wen he Ief my platce he owed me s. 90;
DAYS for hors cart horsfed. logen an meals. He
hsa sn OesP cs2e 81 # Gould
kesp him want 10 ast that eny further r1ten to
You make them Tunne posul cards with
pitchers on the backs
SERIOUS CoLD-speakins of comicaI COM
rnunications from q little town in Ohio that re-
3oices IN the euphonious and somewhat Biblical
name Of Paradise Hill veteran has written to the
Interior Department TO have his name corrected,
and call attention TO cold that appears to be
of considerable dimensions His apparent motive
is to emphasize his nfirmities Stir the soft
heart Of Uncle Sam This is what he says:
Paradise Hill Ohio
Asst sucrey Interir. Wasshenten. u s.
Teu address me at Paris while you OFT too of ad.
dress my coUntrie sect at Witch 7 at oil
s a oo fhS 9cS fcS r ne thS dsd ss @
hicted to sHnie one person soldier SaIer or sitzn
at Paradice.
BLESSED BT Observation-Disclosures sover-
eighty is not the only good that has come to Ha-
wall from the United States" said DR.. Hugh NJ
Smith, Deputy Commissioner of Fish and Fish
cries. yesterday. American frogs proving to
be a great blessing TO those islands. Four years
ago seventy-tEo were shipped from California and
set down in various places around Hilo They
thrived and multiplied. and have now been intro
duced into most OF the Hawaiian Islands. These
hatrachia by cleaning stagnant pools, have dimn-
fshed sickness among the herds of cattle particu-
IarIy on Kauai. They have also averted the death
cf cattle and sheep by devouring the huke, a little
animal that makes its habitat in Hawaiian grasses
Though small this creature has the power wher
swallowed to gnaw its way TO vital organs Of cattle
and sheen nd For frogs. however