The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1903-02-01
FUN OF THE WORLD

Representative B-aidwood Of Beaver county Cxlaho-
relates this humorous incident Of the pioneer life
in Beaver county. where every his master
and pubic sentiment law Some we're honest and
others were Many had inflated opinions Of their
importance in the community A stranger walked into
adobe saloon day called drink and invited
two bysanders TO join him. One OF them said: Stranger
you may know what good company you in so
III simply the gentleman behind the county
clerk your right the county attorney. while /.
the probate Judge" A big catte-punching English
stepped and added: Yes. sir, you in the
distinguished presence of three damned
calls in Cmarron territory, while sir horse thief
q
The teacher of the Sunday school class telling
the little boys about temptation and showing how it
sometimes in the attractive used
Illustration the paw of
Now. said. you have all seen the paw of a
cat 1t is soft velvet isn't it?''
''Yes'm," from the class
And you have the paw of dog?'
"Yesm."
Well although the cats paw seems like velvet there
is nevertheless concealed in it something hurts.
What is t?-
No
The dog bites" the teacher when he is in
but what does the do"
Scratches. replied a boy.
Correct said teacher. nodding approx
ngy. Now what the that the dog
"whiskers.' boy seat. And the
litter that around the class brought the
end
IS. z
Richard Golden spent his summer vacation years
in the part Utah. section which is
largely settled by Scandinavians. While he
a congressional campaign and the county
being shy speakers learning that
Golden used appearing in public and that he
a Republican, asked him TO appear and make an adj
dress.
Golden accepted The meeting held in hall.
which filled the doors.
while speaking. Mr. Golden. Il noticed
one old gray beard down in front who seemed TO be
greatly impressed by what said He laughed all
jokes and appauded vehemently whenever / made
a point.
7
introduced He spoke in the Swedish and. al
though could understand word he said. determin
ed to show appreciation of the applause he had
So guided by the infections of his voice appauded
vigorously time he seemed reach climax was
making myself conspicuous and noticed that of
the people in the hall looking hard and sni
ing. Finally the behind leaned and
whispered 10
Do you know what he is sayingg he asked
No. 1 said. L really can't understand word he
Then tell you your guidance he
latng your speech
sas sa
The talk the Republican of House
OF Representatives in Washington turned college yes
Il have heas.i lot If ,nage yelis in time
Representative Driscolll OF Syracuse, n. Y. but
think the medical students of the Syracuse University
class of 1904 have the wonder of the world. 1t is
'Well man, sick man, man. stiff;
Dig EN- up. cut EN- up. what's the diff?
Humorous, tumerus blood and gore
Syracuse med!cos. 1901"
made between its elders takes literally and
in recountins it puts Irishman shame. declares
the Philadelphia Press. This the last week
in school northeastern secton this
city The schoolmistress discussing scriptures
and mentioned the of Samson. OF whom spoke
of being the strongest who lived She at
tempted to show his muscular power by stat
ing simply possible OF the wonderful feats
he accomplished.
a little girl in class listened
ordinary interest and after teacher had
finished the child permission speak
well, Ethel asked the teacher. what is it,"
Samson wasn't strong my papa was.
rs your father surprisingly strong?" queried
teacher. smiling
"oh my papa's orfuI strong replied Ethel with
emphasis. why 1 heard say that he had an
ellefant his hands
The late Sol Smith Russell fond telling
amusing story of old darkey in Washington who
Noted his Of aAhe famous states
of ante-bellum days. To him day a
rather pompous member a comparatively
sress who resembed OF the famous forensic giants
or old only In his capacity Tor ardent spirits He
inclined to be coloqual So he addressed
patronzingly: Uncle Daniel I understand that you
used to know Webster Clay Calhoun. and all the cee
brated statesmen of before the times oh yes.
sub: members dem all" responded the old darkey.
We'll Daniel have been that look like Daniel
Webster. Can sec any resemblance the with
swelling OF the chest and the striking of attitude
in supposed Imitation great Well vas sub:
yo' does mind me pow'ful O. Mars. Websiah in
respecks.' Indeed In what particulars do / remind
hattered statesman osIy in dc BRET sub responded
Daniel; mosIy in de BRET"
z x Z x
When Barnard Shaw's play. Arms and the Man"
produced in London for the time I, was well
received. the curtain there clam
orous calls for the author to which Shaw was AZ
length induced respond. The SIN cheer
ing; but there dssentIent the gallery who
"boong' with the fun power a pair of very
strong lungs. Mr.. Shaw looked up at tho disturber
and said. seriously: Yes. sir quite agree with
you: but what 10 against whole housefuI?'
x < <
Oliver Wendell Phillips. she abolitionst never per-
mitted slave walt on IL related
one day while in Charleston S. c. he
the dinneriabie hotel when negro attempt
ed to him. he asked How long have you bern
a siaye?" I Amt get time talk about
isb questions the slave replied wild only minutes
for dinner" Mr. Phillips told the to leave
room that he would leave him Rim
table: that Re would wait himself dat.
suh said the waiter sponstie siiber
de table SUI"
Z < <
The play had reached climax third act.
says the Chicago Tribune. audience -rfa
opera frontier sat beafhiessfy
awaiting the outcome.
All hs-s saaried the villain. pushing open
If the dungeon vfere the hero lay bound On chafaz-
All ha-a. Montgomery Nurgarroyc yo, are IN my