The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1903-06-20
IDEAS ON MARRIAGE
"oLo GoRGoN GRAHAM" TELLS A.
~ E{ = FEW TRUTHS. H.. e T
Ills Advice to His Son Pierrepont May
r Be Taken to Heart by Many Aspir-
Ing and Eligible 6achelors-case OF
Romance and Reality.

( OF course you're in no position yet
to think of being engaged even, and
that's why I'm little afraid that you
may be planning to get married. But
twelve-dollar clerk, who owes fifty.
two dollars for roses, needs keeper
more than wife. want to say right
here that there always comes time
to the fellow who blows fifty-two dol
lars at lick on roses when he thinks
how many staple groceries he could
have bought with the money. After
all, there's no fool like young fool,
because in the nature of things he's
got long time to live.
l suppose I'm tanning the air when
ask you to be guided by my judg-
ment in this matter, because, while q
young fellow will consult his father
about buying horse, he's cock-sure
OF himself when it comes to picking a
wife. While a man doesn't see much
of girls family when he's counting,
he's apt to see good deal of it when
he's housekeeping, and while he does
not marry his wife's father, there's
nothing in the marriage VOW to pre-
vent the old man from borrowing
money from him, and you can bet if
he's old Job ,Dashkam he'll do it. A
man can't pick his own mother, but he
can pick his sons mother, and when
he chooses a father-in-law who plays
the bucket shops, he needn't be sur
prised if his own son plays the races.
Never marry poor girl who's been
raised like rich one. She's simply
| traded the virtues of the poor for the
vices of the rich without going long
on their good points. To marry for
money or to marry without money is
crime. There's no real objection to
marrying woman with a fortune, but
there is to marrying fortune with
woman.
While you are at it, there's nothing
like picking out a gOOd-loOking wife,
because even the handsomest woman
looks homely sometimes, and so you
get little variety; but homely one
can only look worse than usual.
Beauty is only skin deep, but that's
leep enough to satisfy any reasonable
man. Il want to say right here that
to get any sense out of proverb
usually find that 1 have to turn it
wrong side out.) Then, too, if fell
lows bound to marry fool, and lot
of men have to if they're going to
hitch up into a well-matched team,
there's nothing like picking a good.
looking one.
Some fellows propose to a girl be.
fore they know whether her front and
her back hair match, and then boiler
that they're stuck when they find that
she's got cork leg and a glass eye
as we'll. 1 haven't any sympathy for
them.
They start out on the principle that
married people have only one meal a
day, and that of fried oysters and tut
ti-frutti ice-cream after the theater.
Naturally girls got her better nature
and her best complexion along under
those circumstances; but the really
valuable thing to know is how she ap'
proaches ham and eggs at seven a. M.
and whether she brings her complex
ion with her to the breakfast table.
And these fellows make a girl believe
that they're going to- spend all the
time between eight and eleven p. m.
for the. rest of their lives, holding a
hundred and forty pounds, live weight,
in their lap, and saying that it feels
like feather. The thing to find out
is whether, when one of them gets up
to holding a ten-pound baby in his
arms, for five minutes, he's going to
carry on as if it weighed a ton.-From
Letters From Self-made Merchant
to His Son." by George Horace Lori
mer. By permission of Small, May:
nard & Co., Publishers Boston, Mass.