The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1903-02-19
PREPARED FOR BURGLARS.
Ingenious Scheme of q Man Whose
Wife Was Away Stirs Up Some
Excitement. IL

ST had been keeping bachelors hall
while my wife was away" sadly re-
marked the man whose wife had been
in the country. "Of course, it was
generally late when I turned in at
night, and, as we had been good
deal worried by sneak thieves in my
part of the city, / was afraid they
might make a raid during my abb
sence. So / set my wits to work.
First rented a phonograph with
megaphone attachment. Then l got
a husky-voiced friend to talk into
the machine. His talk, which was de-
livered at the top of his voice, was
mostly about calling the police, hav-
ing the drop on some one, firing a
revolver, and other conversation cal
culated to make burglar think he
had gone against the real game.
"After I had the phonograph nice
ly loaded I made a test of it. I'm
free to confess that burglar who
heard it would be worse frightened
than if he stumbled on to reserve
squad of policemen.
"I put the loaded phonograph up
in our fiat, and connected it with
strings and wires SO that if any one
who didn't know just how to work
the combination tried to force any
of the doors he would start the
machine on it's line of strong-arm
conversation. I figured that no
burglar would wait to see what the
man with the husky voice would
actually do. No, that burglar would
have immediate business in the
street. Our apartments were safe,
and felt mighty proud OF my little
contrivance.
"Maybe one or more burglars went
against my photograph protection
game; if they did they fled without
leaving any traces. But in abouta week
my wife decided to return and in
cidentally to bring her mother with
her. She didn't intend to reach the
city until late in the evening, so
sent me telegram addressed to our
apartments instead of at my Office.
Of course, fate willed it that should
dine at restaurant and go direct
from there to the theater, not reach
ing home until late.
''In the meantime my wife arrived
at the station. There was no one
to meet her, but as she had her key
and thought the telegram had missed
me, that didn't worry her much.
Accompanied by her mother she went
home in cab, took out her key, and
started to enter our apartments
Right at this point the trouble in
large quantities broke out.
The key didn't work very well
and she must have given the door a
little shake. That started the load
ed burglar-portection phonograph
In an instant there was roar:
"'Police! Police! Get out of here
or I'll shoot. Thieves! Murder!'
''It was enough to give any woman
the fright of her life. My wife had
good pluck, though, and didn't faint
although I'm certain she would il
she had not had her mother with her
whom she felt she must protect
Somehow they managed to get dowr
| the stairs and arouse the janitor
And all the time the roaring phono-
graph was letting out series .o1
| threats calculated to. curdle the blood
of the bravest burglar, let alone two
| frightened women.
'The janitor, accompanied by a po
Tceman with drawn revolver, made
an Investigation and solved the mys
terry" continued the narrator. ac
cording to the New York Times
"They thought it was big joke. II
fact, it was their jovial attitude tha
gave my wife and mother-in-law thei
suspicious. When l finally reaches
home that night I found them in ;
/ half hysterical state, and an iceber,
i would have been warm compare,
with the greeting I received.
There is still somewhat of
chilly atmosphere in the household.