Waterbury Democrat., 1903-01-17
PREPARED FOR BURGLARS.
Ingenious Scheme of a Man Whose Wife Was Away Stirs Up Some
 Excitement.

'1 had been keeping bachelors hall while my wife was away sadly re marked the man whose wife had been in the country. "Of course, it was generally late when I turned in at night, and, as we had been good deal worried by sneak thieves in my part of the city, was afraid they might make a raid during my ab- sence. So I set my wits to work First I rented a photograph with a megaphone attachment. Then l got a husky-voiced friend to talk into the machine. His talk, which was de. livered at the top of his voice, was mostly about calling the police, hay. ing the drop on some one, firing a revolver, and other conversation cal culated to make a burglar think he had gone against the real game.
 'After I had the photograph nice. 1y loaded I made test of it. I'm free to confess that burglar whc heard it would be worse frightened than if he stumbled on to reserve squad of policemen.
 "I put the loaded photograph uL III OuI ud dAd COllACSUCd Ao Wton strings and wires so that if any one who didn't know just how to work the combination tried to force any of the doors he would start the machine on it's line of strong-arm conversation. I figured that no burglar would wait to see what the man with the husky voice would actually do. No, that burglar would have immediate business in the street Oar apartments were safe. and felt mighty proud of my little contrivance.
 Maybe one Or more burglars went against my photograph protection game; if they did they fled without leaving any traces. But in about week my wife decided to return and in. cidenta1ly to bring her mother with her. She didn't intend to reach the city until late in the evening, so sent me telegram addressed to our apartments instead of at my office. Of course, fate willed it that I should dine at restaurant and go direct from there to the theater, not reach. ing home until late.
 LII Luc uCd1lIulC LILY WlIC dAliSSu at the station. There was no one to meet her, but as she had her key and thought the telegram had missed me, that didn't worry her much. Accompanied by her mother she went home in cab, took out her key, and started to enter our apartments. Right at this point the trouble in large quantities broke out.
 ''The key didn't work very well, and she must have. given the door little shake. That started the load ed burglar-portection phonograph. In an instant there was a roar:
 "'Police! Police! Get out of here or I'll shoot. Thieves! Murder!'
 'It was enough to give any woman the fright of her life. My wife had good pluck, though, and didn't faint, although I'm certain she would if she had not had her mother with her, whom she felt she must protect. Somehow they managed to get down the stairs and arouse the janitor. And all the time the roaring phono- graph was letting out series of threats calculated to curdle the blood O1 LAC DIoNcSo buA s AoA iSC oAohO wv frightened women.
 "The janitor, accompanied by DO, liceman with a drawn revolver, made an investiga tion and solved the mys- tery," continued the narrator. ac- cording to the New York Times. ''They thought it was big joke. In fact, it was their jovial attitude that gave my wife and mother-in-law theil suspicious. When I finally reached home that night I found them in a half hysterical state. and an iceberg would have been warm compared with the greeting I received.
 There is sal somewhat of a chillx atmosphere in tae household. ].