The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-08-10
The Gold Cure.

well. from that day on Pluto was
never known 70 touch an intoxicating
drop. In fact, he began to crow strong
ly on the subject of temperance. or,
rather. total abstinence. to the rising
general ton of ROSTERS IA the poultry
yard and by every gesture and chortle
express his adherence Of the foul fiend-
Fail 10 see the point? Ny dear friends.
he had uncOnsCiously taken the gold
cure. The gastric secretiOns within
his stomach had so worked upon the
s. gold piece as to produce bichlor-
lde of gold, hence his permanent cure.
"Of course you are not believers IN
the chickens. L can see that, near
sighted though / am" grumbled the
judge, blowing long smoke billow into
the rafters Of the porch: but IL you
knew my friend. Blossom Meiggs, just
two miles uD the pike. he'd soon con-
vert you and tell YOU some authenti-
Gated tales about the birds that would
make your hair sit up and bristle.
Meiggs goes in for incubated chick
ems. l do not. I've always cOntended
that no oil lamp can take the place in
the affection Of the newborn chick OF
a feathered pfOgenitOr. and here's q
story bearing on the power of sugges-
ton which has TO do with an incubator
owned by Meiggs and the chickens TO
which it stood in the pale moonlight
or artificial motherhood Once this in
cubatOr turned out thirteen chicks from
a breed that had been breast-raised
for fifty generations What was the
consequence Gentlemen believe me,
every one OF those chicks had four
legs. shaped like the legs Of an incu-
bator, and when they attained matur-
ity- they refused to sit on anything but
discarded lamp chimneys and wick
holders II was pathetic to behold such
perversions- of the natural instinct
one story Blossom Meiggs tells TO
his intimate friends, and, / must add,
he usually tells it in the season when
the mint is ripe and the jug is dis
tinguished among other things for its
proximity. is about a hen he once had
that had "a perfect passion for setting.
That little female would go around,
when eggs were scarce, collecting pO-
tatOes. snow balls. doorknobs, rocks
almost anything to squat upon. And
upon mounds of the most unhatchable
objects she would sit for hours. days,
weeks, hoping against hope, bidding
DESPAIR declare itself a futile shadow
in the bright. unwaveTing light of her
eternal sanguinity.
Tried to Hatch the Clock.
well. one day that poor. impas-
stoned hen went the way of all fowl.
and, Meiggs, as a tribute 20 her noble
qualities, had her to the taxidernlist' S
and stuffed so superiority that she
looked absolutely lifelike. Then Meiggs
put the remains on the clock I'm his
parlor. But as in life, SO it is in death,
is Z. rule which. ] believe is held by the
TheisOphists, and Meiggs always de-
clared that that hen once belonged to
a Mahatma or Yogi Of the cult
Would you possibly deem it mag
Unable. to quote Meiggs' words, that
stuffed hen no sooner was a-straddle
the clock than the spirit Of industry
and endeavor entered her chemical
lined body, and she began operations
on the clock. Day after day she sat
there motionless. but undoubtedly full
of lofty ambition and purpose. until
one sensatiOn-marked morning Meiggs
entered the parlOr to find that the hen
had Matched from the clock setting one
dozen Waterbury watches.
But, gentlemen, / do not ask you
to believe this story" concluded Judge
Boldertoss to the two remaining listen
ers. the others having vanished down
the vista which revealed a stage in
rapid transit; 4 sometimes doubt
Meiggs myself"