Hattiesburg daily progress. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 18??-1909, 1903-12-29
LIGHTER SIDE
OF CONGRESS.
Our Statesmen as Viewed by
a Capitol Guide.
SURPRISING INFORMATION FOB $50.


Unconscfously Gridironed - Where
"Uncle Joe" Cannon Eschews To-
bacco.
Eyes, congress has its lighter side
said the capitol guide, breaking away
for the time being from his stereotyped
lecture, says the Washington CORE
spondent Of the New York Herald.
"Only a few senators, Charles Little
field, Billy Sulzer and the country edi-
tors, take the thing seriously all the
time.
Now, there is Senator Hoar down
there; appears to be scolding. Listen.
He Is Notwithstanding about the
prerogatives of the senate and the dig
nifty of Massachusetts. Look at the
Ohio election smile on Senator Hanna's
face, and you will see how deep an
impression the statesman from the
grand old state of Massachusetts Is
making. But, then, Uncle Mark would
laugh at a funeral He had fun with
other night He and the president
sat In adjoining boxes, and when
the mob chorus became particularly
violent and swayed over toward the
presidents box Senator Hanna called
across: Look out, Mr.. President. Here
come the Colombians! That's how
these chaps sometimes treat great in
ternational questionable death Of one
nation and the birth Of another"
Really said the demure young
Senator Hanna with a severe express
sion.
And, speaking of the birth Of
new nation continued the guide, do
you see that man on the front seat In
the diplomatic gallery? That's
Frenchman from Paris. He is the min
lister from Panama. He thinks he and
Mr.. Cromwell made republic one
night at dinner down at the Willard.
As a matter of fact they did. Last
year this NJ. Philippe Bunau-Varilla
was a regular attendant at all the SEN
ate lobby meetings. Inconspicuous, no
body inquired who he was. Now he
flashes across the international firma-
ment the minister plenipotentiary of
the last born, with ticket for the
front row in the diplomatic gallery.
Eyes, that is Senator Morgan down
there In the front row on the floor,
with his desk piled high with books.
What he is saying about the new min
lister from the new republic of Panama
is a-plenty, but you won't find the
words in those books In front of him.
II those two ever meet face to face in
the corridors and Senator Spooner does
not step In between them with a COM
promise proposition few ultimatums
will be let loose"
what are all those books in front of
Senator Morgan?" asked bank presi-
dent from Burlington. VT.
Speeches, sir, speeches; Senator Nor
gan's speeches Congressional Records
and they contain at least two of the
senator's brief remarks delivered at the
last session. The public printer is try
Ing to catch up on the others. Too old
to talk? Certainly not. Why, he's the
youngest man in the senate, barring the
quartet of bridegrooms.
"Ah, there comes Senator German in
from the cloakroom, and Blackburn,
Pettus, Cockrell. Daniel and Carmack..
Yes, that's Tillman, and there comes
Teller. with blood in his. eye.
Eyes, that's Clark-Clark of Montana
with his fifty-seven varieties Of min
ing stock. He is upbraiding Allison
for making positive statements in an
interview.
Eyes, that's him-that smile coming
through the door That's Chauncey, all
right. And that man just behind is
Platt-T. @. of New York-youngest
man in the senate just now. Stewart
and Hepburn? Right over there in the
corner, talking together-two men with
the big chrysanthemums in their but
tonholes. But your Uncle Thomas G.
of New York beats them all-all the
bridegrooms, l mean. He came back
this fall fresh as daisy and as spright
ly as Beveridge.
"What is 1t? Oh. that man right on
the front seat. way down In his chair?
Quay. sir; Matthew Stanley Quay of
Pennsylvania. New Mexico. Arizona
and Oklahoma. also Florida. No. he
doesn't say much, but he thinks all
right. l expect he'll be lacking state
hood amendments on to the Panama
canal treaty. That man next to him
Is Cullom. busy offering a resolution
asking the president for the CORE
spondence on Panama. He's trying to
get 1t In before the Democrats get to
work, If not incompatible with the
public interest. By the way, that In
compatibility in resolutions Of this sort !
is one of the great jokes of congress.
That man is Alger, former secretary
OF war. He's got it up his sleeve to
get square with a. few men before he
gets out of congress. and I'm inclined
to think he'll do It. All, there goes
Allison. moving an executive session.
It's secret. you know, and you don't
know anything about it till the morn |
ing papers come out, so we had better
move along to the house"
els that Senator Tim Sullivanr ask
ed the proprietor Of sporting goods
store in Detroit.
Lord no; that's nobody but Joe
Bailey. answered the guide. somewhat
DISCOURAGED "No man in here Of the
name OF sullivan. The Sullivans are
all in the hose. Let's be going.
s.Thats tie supreme court room on