New-York tribune., 1903-06-09
THE Talk OF THE DAY.

Many years ago the statisticians OF the Pension
Office made careful calculations to show the nUm-
ber Of survivors Of the War of the Rebellion for
a series Of years. They used the basis of their
calculations the mortality tables of the insurance
companies, but far out of the way. The old
soldiers are dying off more rapidly than
pected. According to the estimate the total num-
her of survivors in 1902 should have been 93O.3S0
while the pension rolls show only 725 100. To the
latter number should be added or per cent
to cover those who have applied for pen
sions.
she-why has Boston the name of being such a
He-Because of the number of crooks in the
streets l suppose.-(Harvard Lampoon.
"a SQUARE DEAL
It's Square Deal. Massa Roosevelt
OATS de only thing ask
With word of hope and cheering,
Just to help in task
Dere's a lot of weary clmbin'
On the road we've set our feet;
Dere's a lot of toll and sufferin
And discouragements to meet.
But God bless you, Massa Roosevelt!
It's the nations heart feel
That is speaking when you says weH have
fair Square Deal
HORACE C. DU VAL.
Where 1t Wouldn't Work.-His Teacher-Dont
hand know what Your right hand does? '0ui 'ei'
Tommy-Yes'm, but you've Just got to take both
~ ~
taiL-(Chicago Tribune.
Secretary Shaw tells this story OF an incident of
his practice in Iowa:
An old Iowa practitioner, lawyer of ability and
orator of known reputation, was ptted against
recent graduate in the profession in the trial of
case before jury. The young lawyer had the first
say, and in making his address to the jury he took
particular pains to initiate certain mannerisms Of
the older lawyer. He carefully adjusted his cuffs
before beginning his argument stroked an imagi-
nary imperial his chin and then rested index
finger Of his right hand along the side Of his nose
These were the habitual preliminary mannerisms
of the older lawyer, and they repeated sew
eral times throughout the argument which was
made by the young they provoked the jury
and judge to laughter.
When the veteran to make reply he did
not neglect to go through his preliminary motions
with deliberation and precision than
usual He bowed to the judge and to the jury and
then began
Gentlemen of the jury and your honorable sir
That young man acts like good lawyer, but he
talks like blamed fool"
The advantage which the young thought he
had gained in the contest vanished in the roar Of
laughter which followed at his expense.
A Just Reward.-"Too bad about DR.. Killem fall
ing into the ro well It Wasnf til so,a ,a a+os D..
the sick and left the well alone -(Melbourne Aus
tralian.
The numerous American tourists In Egypt viii
hear with pleasure that a great Improvement is
about 70 be made in the present system to supply
the city of Cairo with drinking water. Actually,
this is yet furnished exclusively by the Nile. it
is easy to understand how dangerous Is that sys-
tenn since cholera and other epidemic diseases are
known TO be transmitted through Egypt mainly
by the Nile waters. But soundngs have been made
and they have discovered at Cairo large under
ground sheet of water. perfectly pure. An agree
ment has been concluded between the Anglo
Egyptian Government and the company of the
Cairo waters for the establishment of artesan wells
In all the quarters OF the city
Too Much Style for Him--"Heres a purity come
Off" exclaimed the old
What s?'
This here letter from Bill. Says must dress
up to him graduate, an mustn't think o.
comm without collar myself an the mule -
ATLANTA Constitution