The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1903-12-04
MR.. JOBSON OWNS UP.

last IN Eu1LMaSInS around the atlli
Along toward supper time he elompe
DOWNSTAIRS. carr lng a heavy, dust-eo'
cred, biach-enaIiISleG clOcK IN his armi
Why isn't TINS clock worAing?" b
inquired OF Mrs Jobson.
why" Iepneu Mrs JCbscu. 'yol
put 1t up in the attic yourself a coupl
OF years ago-yOu saIu > gu were ure'
OF looAing at it-lha, 1t Was TOO blaei
and gloomy lOoking"
Another one OF those things ! mus
have said when | was taking hasheesl
and sound asleep" said Mr.. Jobson. =.
don't see why you want TO hide abou
half the truck we possess up in that at
/ tic. Ill bet there's 1000 worth OF 6ooc
stuff moldering away up there, covered
with cobwebs. and lying idle, that We
might be getting the good out of.
Just hand me that oil can off the
sewing machine. and I'll grease this
old hew-gaw up a bit, and in about a
minute you'll hear the nusicalest tick
ing that you ever listened to"
Mr.. Jobson opened the back door of
the clock and carefully oiled its works,
self-complacently remarking as he did
so:
This is where | simeon clocks.
When | was a youngster, | used to keep
all of the clochs in the neighborhood
in running order-folks used to say that
lad a regular genius for tinkering with
mulish and balky clocks and making
'em get busy after they'd been on strike
and silent for long time"
"Yes?" said Mrs. ,lobson, with fine
imitation of enraptured interest.
"Uh-huh," said Mr.. Jobson. "They
used to say that all young Jobson had
to do was to just look at stubborn and
pig-headed clock, and away the durn
thing 'ud go, and never get up kick
again until the works wore out. There,
now, she's oiled-now watch her slick
er!" and Mr.. Jobson picked up the clock
with both of his hands and gave it a
vigorous shake. Nothing doing. The
clock didn't tick. Mr.. Jobson shook ii
again, this time up and down. Dead
silence on the part of the clock.
That's funny" said Mr.. Jobson !
his head and shooting light
ming glance at Mrs. Jobson to see
she was smiling-but Mrs. job
son is used to lightning glances. and she
wasn't. You haven't been fooling any
with this clock since it was put away up
in the attic, have your"
"'Deed I haven't" said Mrs. Jobson,
n reply. 81 haven't never SO much as
.ouched it since you put it up there"
"Was it working all right when it was
killed to the garrett" inquired Mr.. Job
On.
Perfectly" replied Mrs. Jobson.
"Well, it's blamed queer that's all
We got to say about it, said Mr.. job
on, in suspicious tone. You'd think
hat after a rest of couple Of years |
hat clock would be actually enthusiastic
or work. Sure you didn't let it remain
tut in the back yard ard get rained or.
r anything like that, whilst switching
hings around in the garnet, en-"
eve never so much as had my hands
n it since you put it UP in the attic"
repeated Mrs. Jobso1.
"Well, the blasted things been con
lred and has got the evil eye or some
hing, all right enough" srowled MT.
OLSON, grabbing hold OF the CLOCK and
eginning to swing it UP ;.Ld Gown AID
ack and forth like man pulling al
machine
No t-iG n
est, tine clock needs"
maybe it needs course of breakfast
,od-you know all about it, s'pose," r
tapped Mr.. Jobson. Maybe it wants
so out on the lawn and roll like a
caring calf or a Newfoundland pup.
aybe it demands the union wage scale
i'd only six hours work day. Maybe
wants some popcorn or pickles. May
you thing you're peter able to get
is clock to do what 1t was built to
than am, hey?"
Not at all" calmly replied Mrs. job
n, "only was going to suggest that" 8
Well, I'm not going around bellering
r any suggestions whatever, of any
nd, am II" interrupted MIR. Jobson.
ust you lemme attend to this, all by
Y lonesome, if you please, and II K
eres any work in this clock, then it'll
working inside of Is minutes, or tn
MT know the difference between a
,ck and bucket OF whitewash." II
Mr. Jobson fooled with the clock for Je
out ten minutes, blowing on all the III
reels and cogs and tinl-er.ng with
I'm with the point of his lead pencil, :.
t it was all no go. The c.oc.; stub a.
rnly refused to emit so much as Of,
itary tici.. Then Mr.. Jobson, with r
, perspiration standing out on his fe,
ehead. eXuded growl of rage, ard be
sed the clock onto the sitting room On
nge. while he stormed up and down TIC
room.
l want that COMPOUNDED piece OF II
ony and decrepit mechanism tatcn
ay from these grounds by the ga, bare Ma
n in the morning, howled Nj. Jcbson
be tossed the clock onto the lounge,
ID"
But Why" softly inquired Mrs. job