The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-12-26

anything, but have just gone plunging ahead with the same archaic machinery you began with, with the result that peo- pie who need you in their business can't get half enough of you.'
 But these things cost money" persist | ed my visitor. "and I haven't go ta cent in my pocket-fact is.'' he added, glanc- ing at his toga, "I haven't even got a pocket"
 There you are again. said I. Every body else has got a pocket though. You | haven't even paused long enough to get a decent suit of clothes, preferring to fly around in that same old fashioned night shirt that you wore when you first got your job. It's a wonder to me that you haven't been arrested long before this for wearing such a costume. I couldn't walk from Herald Square to Madison in duds like that without being arrested-no, nor anybody else, from the President down. If you must wear night clothes, why in thunder don't you try pajamas? |? Moreover, I'll venture to say you haven't had your beard trimmed or your hair cut for five thousand years. Why don't you spruce up and have some style about you?" .+'
 '.It seems I'm a failure all around !" sighed the old gentleman, dejectedly.
 Where can get any clothes without money?' v
 I'll fit you out if you'll give me an oc- casional forty-eight hour day so that. I can catch up with my work" said |. Whats more. I'll pay for a hair cut and buy you safety razor I-- you'n promise to use it, "'t
 "Oh, well.". said he, redectively "after alf clothes don't make the man. I'm. not going to worry bout my dress If people don't like my style, I'm sorry, hut I've no spare moments to make a Willieboy of myself. But you are perfectly right when you say I'm overworked. I need an as- sistant."
 One assistant won't help you." I put in. What you really need to do Is to get yourself incorporated. This is no time for individual efforts. It is the corporation that does the business these days. Santa Claus has done 1t, and it Is up to you to follow suit. Capitalize yourself at a bill- ion. turn over all your tangible assets to the corporation and devote the rest of your span to enjoying your otium cum dig" -.f
 An inventory of my tangible assets observed the old gentleman with a smile, comprises only the things you have luth- lessly condemned as archaic-one scythe, one hour glass and a pocketless night gown. Who would take stock in a com pany whose property was so limited as | that? I suppose at forced sale they wouldn't bring more than $3."
 Then capitalize yourself at $500. 900 900 instead of $1,00o,OOO, coo" said I. That is nearer right, according to the figures of modern high finance. If thing is worth less it can't be capitalized for more than $le0, 900. If it Is worth dollar you can generally raise $aOO. .CO0.OOO on it. In Hush times three dollars worth of real prom erty would justify an issue of s25O,O0o OcO each of two kinds of stock. preferred and common, and so on. The last Is your lay, as see 1t. Organize yourself into general Time Trust. Instead of skip ping around the world like an aimless wanderer. leaving train of dissatisfac- ton in your wake among those who need more of you than you are able under present conditions to give. open headquar- ters here in New York, where people can come and get all the time they want and I'll warrant you'll soon be doing a land office business. The advantages of the scheme are obvious. Instead of trying to do the whole business yourself you'll have a completely equipped corps of as- sistapt to do it for you-just as MT. Rockefeller has in the oil business. Next | to time, oil Is about as essential a com modity to the happiness of man as you can find. Suppose the man who controls it should emulate your methods and try Lo supply the eartn Wlth II Wlth single oil can. He'd bust in a week. physically and financially
 'tIt sounds mighty plausible" said my visitor.
 Ut would be the greatest triumph of the ages. if 1t could be done,' I answer ed. You continually hear men saying they'd do this. and they'd do that great thing If they only had the time! If I'd had five minutes more. could have put this scheme through. Another hour hwould have given me the upper hand. l If So and So had had another week
 he'd have won such and such an election.
 When you come right down to it it. is tho lack of time that iS reasonable for al