davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04

There is one enemy for which the
pansy lover must watch Ike a lynx,
and that is little green worm that
seems made on purpose to deyour pan
sizes. Where he comes from or why he
should exist at all is mystery. But
IL you find your little plants stop grow
ing and see the leaves perforated with
small holes and your blossoms gnawed
behold, your enemy is there. Eternal
vigilance alone will save you. Your
face must be brought to the surface of
the ground Kneel and turn up every
leaf. Doubtless you will find the small
green monster curled up and hiding.
sucking out all the juices of the plant
and so becoming exactly its color,
which makes him so difficult to find.
and If not checked he will utterly de-
stroy 1t. He will devour it in a few
days.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04
Some Example. of Nerve

In recent big libel case the foreman
of the jury received letter from a
publican, apparently otherwise sane,
asking him to insure that the jury
should find for the defendant because
he had heavy bet on the result, and
this astonishing epistle was read in
court. 1t is interesting to note that the
writer lost his bet anyhow. Equally
bland was the request once made to
Mr.. Balfour during his premiership to
have dismissed from the commission
of the peace n justice who had very
properly sentenced the author of the
request, notorious ruiiian, to stiff
term Of Imprisonment for sending beg
ging letters.--London Answers.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04
Superstition About Cats.


In the Monferrato 1t Is believed that
all the cats who wander about upon
the roofs during the month of Febru-
airy are really witches, whom 1t Is law
full and even necessary TO shoot. A
German superstition has 1t that If a
black cat sits upon the bed OF sick
man 1t is presage Of his death. while
II after his decease II Is seen upon his
grave 1t is enough to arouse doubts as
10 the locality to which his soul has
departed. In Hungary 1t IS thought
that cats generally become witches be-
tween the ages of seven and twelve
years A French belief concerning the
cat Is that If the animal be carried In
n cart and the wind blow from 1t to
the horses they Immediately fall tired.
IL any part of the horseman's clothing
be made of cats skin, the horse will
feel as though 1t carried double bur
den. In other countries, however, su-
perstition Is favorable rather than ad-
verse to the cat. A variant of the IA
nous story of the Kilkenny cats is
found in Piedmont, the cats being,
however, replaced by wolves.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04
A MARINE AUTOCRAT.


The Captain of the Battleshtp and
His Absolute Authority.
Over the vast establishment rules the
captain In supreme and isolated author
ity. All his accomplishments must De
those of the seaman, for he directs the
movements of the ship In all evolu-
tons, and his decision upon all profess
sional points is final. His responsibility
at all times is grave and exacting. In
time of war 1t will strain the stoutest
nerves. In the hour OF battle 1t is moth
ing short of appalling when be stands
alone in his coming tower. having con-
troll of all the tremendous forces lying
latent In his ship only to be released at
the proper moment by touch of his
hand. lie is the guiding spirit of an
enormous projectile of $4,000 tons that
rushes through the water at speed. 1t
may be, of fifteen knots, and he knows
that the slightest mistake of his head
OF heart may mean national disaster.
But besides being the naval and mill
tary chief Of the establishment he Is a
lawyer-a kind of justice of the peace,
as 1t were. who holds court every morn
ing. investigates reports of misdemean-
ors and assigns punishment to the
guilty. The delinquents are brought to
the mast - the quarter deck = with
their aeeusers. Both sides are heard,
and swift judgment usually follows. In
this capacity it will be noted that the
captain is court, judge and jury. Not
infrequently he acts as clergyman and
as such is the bishop of his diocese, ac-
knowledging no ecclesiastical superior,
reading the service on Sundays, oftici-
atlng at the burial of his dead and In
the old days occasionally marrying low
Lieutenant Commander Gleayes
In Worlds Work.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04
Red Jackets Memory.

Red Jacket, the Indian chief, had
more confidence in his own memory
than in books and papers Of white men.
There was council at one time be-
fore Tompkins, an early governor Of
New York, In regard to an ancient
treaty. The agent said one thing, but
Red Jacket corrected him. "You have
forgotten said the American agent
I'VE have 1t written down ON paper"
''The paper then tells lie," was the
confident answer. II have It written
here" continued the chief, placing his
hand with dignity upon his brow
You Yankees are born with a feath-
err between your fingers, but your pa
per does not speak the truth. The In
dian keeps his knowledge here. This is
the book the Great Spirit gave him. 1t
does not lie." A reference was made to
the treaty in question, when to the as
'tonishment of all every word that Red
Jacket had said was confirmed on the
document.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04

In his Random Recollections"
Charles II. L. Brookfield, highly es-
teemed actor on the London stage,
says: Il remember piece which we
produced at the Comedy theater, writ
ten by popular author and very
strongly cast, which amused us all so
much that we could hardly rehearse It.
Charles Hawtrey used every now and
then to warn us: Now. don't speak too
soon on that. There's certain TO be a
big laugh, and we don't want them to
miss the next line We rehearsed for
SIX weeks. On the first night nothing
went wrong-but the piece. There was
not one laugh nor one round Of ap-
plause from start to finish. We took
of the comedy in ten days, during
which we rehearsed as a stop gap a
conventional three act farce with no
literary pretensions. think II ran for
n year"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04
FIXED DATES IN RUSSIA.
They Rule Even In Simple Things
with Absolute Tyranny.

with Absolute Tyranny.
Routine is exceedingly strong in Rus
sia. There is day In June upon which,
says tradition, it becomes safe to battle
In the rivers after the winter freeze
No matter how warm the water may
be earlier, no matter how cold 1t may
be on that day. then is the time to take
the first swim. Other fixed dates are
mentioned In Ivan at Home" by Her
bert Barry. or course the statements
do not apply to all Russians, but to
the average peasant only.
No man dare touch an apple before
the 9th of August. however ripe the
fruit may really be before that day.
He does not believe It is fit to eat.
The village sportsman, although he
may have observed the blackcocks
early owing to the warmth of the
spring, cannot make up his mind to
shoot them until the appointed day has
arrived
No traveller will start on a journey
on either Monday or Friday.
Although the delay is strongly
against his own interests the fisher
man will not cast his nets before a GER
tain day, whether the season be late or
early.
No lamb Is supposed to be able to
reach the age Of mutton should 1t have
been born before the day named in the
peasants calendar. And 80 on through
all the common events In their daily
life does this attachment to fixed dates
hedge Ia a Russians existence.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04
OWEN MEREDITH.
A Dinner speech of His That ELECTED
Howls OF Derision.

/ once sat at banquet given In Lon
don by Wilson Barrett to Lawrence
Barrett says writer In an English
magazine Earl Lytton presided. a
curled. oiled. effemlnate. superellious
Top. lie had a Roman tragedy TO sell 10
Wilson Barrett. That was why be
came.
He eulogiZcd Wilson Barrett in a
speech. II believe" he said. that Mr.
Barrett won some success with piece
called consulting his notes. The Lights
OF London suppose II was the work
OF some dramatic hack" George Sims
sat facing him aud never said word.
Then his lordship went drnwling on:
II next find on the list Of Mr.. Barretts
successes something called The Silver
King Here again | know nothing OF
the authorship. The names of those
dramatic carpenters do not interest
me-" AT which Henry Arthur Jones'
glared and flush came IA p the face OF
poor blind Henry Herman.
FINALLY said Lord Lytton. MIR.
Wilson Barrett has placed on his
boards what he humorously calls Ro-
man tragedy | refer TO 'Claudian.' at
tributed to one w. G. Wills. of whom
have never heard" This was too much
for the banqueters. All of them were
personally acquainted with lrving's
pet poet. the modest Wills. SO they
howled derisively.
And Earl Lytton's tragedy, produced
q month later, was dismal failure.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04
ENJOYING A SHOW.
A Charity Concert In London and the
Audience Ii Attracted.


The audience certainly was terrify-
ing one The front rows of the big
hall were filled by old women very Sc
we're or else smiling the perpetual smile
of vacancy. Then came grimy group
OF dock hands. Their wives, some OF
were all over the room. The girls came
In huge feathered hats and yelled high
pitched witticisms to the gangs OF
young hooligans whose one desire
seemed TO be to wreck the show. In
deed they contributed even more audi
bly, to the entertainment than did the
performers, while the clergy who pa.
trollcd up and down seemed on excel
lent terms with everybody, but quite
powerless TO control a good part OF the
audience
Somebody opened with piano solo.
Really people might have more sense
than TO choose Chopin nocturne for
such au audience. The pianist was
twice told to go and get an organ"
There Was shout for some tune IN
known To US, and after that the render
Ing OF Chopin was perIna nently drown
ed In general and stentorian conYersa-
ton. A girl with ambition to become
professional next sang. amid audible
comments on the plalnDess OF her
frock. and she quilted the platform In
awful silence. Berthe aud his cello
had MI even worse tune. lie was iu.
yited tn pet ftfs hair fstif which waa
certainly piece OF timely advice. and
at the frs, deep notes OF his insirB.
nIcut there we're anxious inquiries II
be was In palm. A. this bad percep-
tlble efest 90 lrritab bic BERTHE. there
were general offer. to attend hls fIBer.
al and more advice 10 the effect not 10
take that old geeLer out wiih you
when you ~ eourting." ny this time
the troupe were terrified. and the rec.
tor had to mount the platform and re-
quest some sort of order-Outiook.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04

In China the practice Of luniolatry
exists nj the present day and Is OF very
early origin The chief festival. that
OF Yueping. or moon cakes. Is held dur
ing the eighth month OF the Chinese
year. Persons make cakes OF various
sizes In the shape of the moon and
paint different figures upon them
Friends and relatives pay visits TO one
another. give entertainments and pre-
sent their cakes after making protes-
tations and pouring out oblations TO
the moon.
1t is very remarkable that verse OF
one OF the Jewish prophets should be
explained by this Chinese custom.
The children gather wood" said the
seer. .and the fathers kindle the fire,
and the women knead their dough to
make cakes to the queen of heaven"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04
REFLECTIONS.

A wife often permits her affection to
blind her reason.
Regard for petty things often will
dwarf a mans ambition.
A woman's love can become annoy
ing as well as burdensome.
Marriage based on honest affection
will withstand the ravages Of time.
When a woman gives way to anger,
she begs her own pardon with tears.
Many women find happiness only
when attending to the affairs Of others.
Confidence is not easily gained where
exaggerated love of self is found to
exist.
To decide between love and duty has
caused hours of worry 10 men as well
as TO women.
The man with vice wonders why
so many persons think it their duty to
make public the fact.
Man often shows the hard side of his
disposition to mark more strongly the
generous Observation-Disclosures Bulle-
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04

In very early times all pictures of
Judas were shown with great shocks
of red hair falling down we'll on the
shoulders. This and the fact that the
Judas in the Miracle Plays" was pro-
vided with red hirsute worked the
superstitious people of the middle ages
up to such degree that 1t was actual
ly unsafe for red haired person to APP
pear In company. Seeing that things
were coming to a serious pass, writer's
of all classes began to rebuke and de-
nounce the senseless prejudice against
those of lively colored hair" Cyrano
de Bergerac in his States and En-
pires of the Sun" boldly praised and
glorified the despised color In the fol-
lowing words: "A brave head covered
with red hair is nothing else but the
sun in the midst of his rays, yet many
speak III of it because few have the
honor to be So"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04
BEING A GOOD FELLOW.
II Is a Losing Game In the Long Run
For Most Men.

II Is a Losing Game In the Long nun
For Most Men.
Any sensible young MAD ought to
know that he can't be up late nights
abusing his stomach and be in full pos
session of his faculties for business the
next day. and he ought TO know also
that man must be clear headed and
in full possession OF his faculties to
hold his own In the keen competitor
Of life Your good fellow" is popular
for the time being. but when his money
is gone and he has lost his job and Is
on his uppers the good fellow bus
ness doesn't get him anything. It's
poor fellow" then-another good man
gone wrong. and the boys" are ready
to hall another good fellow" who has
the price.
We don't mean BY this TO say that
"the boys" are mercenary. They don't
altogether pass up a good fellow
when he goes broke, but 1t isn't the
same. They say he hit the booze too
hard and couldn't stand the pace. The
feel sorry for him. but he is out of ii
His good fellowship doesn't excuse him
even in the eyes of his friends for hay-
ing thrown away his opportunity.
The young man who gets the sleep
his system needs. Is temperate in his
habits. lives within his means and
shows up for work IN the morning witt
a clear eye and active brain-t that's the
man business men are looking for.
They want employees whom they can
trust Having worked hard and laid
by q competence, they want to Throw
some OF the burdens Of. and they won't
throw them of on the employee who IS
too much Of good fellow.
Cut Il out boys There's nothing in
II. There's 8 whole LOT Of nonsense in
that good fellow" business You eau;
fool The public very long by living be
yond your means and keeping M aP.
Fe2ra aees= There must he showdown
s0zue TIE ~ ofher and that means 8
soSs G. Se.f reSr.ec, and many bitter ex-
E-sss sc,e~s. May s lSri ght and praulis-
lzS = ax-ss taza has failed h<scs use
y. t-i8asx - t-sVei II TOO swift class
whereas L. - AIRED within lis means
D. gsz Ia - aSSaZs & highly saoeess-
n. meridian
~ xae9z zessat give - Is treas
H-es EASY ! asas Il re cards Ter al
q Is = - ze7ai-es. and mighty
Ter - - esss.s.a fellows Set izts tat
ci1Ss, Is kst-er - earn yoar way
IS. azA - hzzEiEs fez good times
whez yoa hare REACHED the point Y here
you egz spz-s h.ofh the tine AID the
money. Tbea possibly yeu'a have
more sense aid have q different notion
about what a good time is.-Toleio
Bee
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04

A lawyer happened to be acquainted
with juror in petty civil case, and
he met him during a recess of the
court. The lawyer was just lighting
up" and under ordinary circumstances
he would have offered the other cigar
unhesitatingly, but it occurred to him
that 1t might not look right.
81 suppose" he said guardedly, that
a cigar would not influence your ver-
dlct?'
The juror was equally C: rs.
"A good one wouldn't le replied,
but poor one might pre- me-"
He got good cigar Brooklyn Eagle.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04
TaE PERiPATETIC BEAR.
Summer osttEg of Neither Grizzly
aad Her G0snx oa<s

a1d Her toouS tnS&
Their : g deal % discussion among
hunters after big game n the Boun-
tains concerning the sort OF fathers and
husbands grizzly bears make, says
writer In Outing The consensus Of
opinion seems TO be that bruln Is IN IN
faithful. heartless spouse and a con
temptible father. He will help Nine.
Brnin seek cave or an opening In the
rocks or mountain side. where their
cubs may be- born. and he will carry
a dainty morsel, such as a sheep, a
calf or part of a cows carcass there
for his mates food. However, a few
days after the cubs are born In the
family circle he will leave the home,
probably never having any further ac-
quaintanee with his spouse and her
offspring Thereafter Nine. Bruln must
make her own way and provide for her
cubs. Unlike the black bear which Is
n Jolly. fun loving father that rolls and
frollcs with his baby children. the male
grizzly will have nothing to do with
the cubs Nine. Grizzly and her chill
drcn are companions for two summers.
and they hibernate rolled together In
n ball of fur for about 100 days. dur
ing the coolest days of winter.
The mother bear and her young tray
ell far and Wide, moving principally at
night Kit Carson said that the wide
rnnge of family of healthy grizzlies
In summer season is almost incalcu.
liable, He had reason TO know of II
mother grizzly and her two cubs that
once left their alternating cave among
the southern spurs of the Rocky noun
tans In New Mexico one spring In the
forties. crossed the Colorado and Wy
oming were seen In the mountains In
Montana and were back In New Mex
leo again for another winter before the
following October.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04

A boy Is an odd piece of furniture,
but he Is the ground and chief ingre-
dent of the man. Delude not yourself
with the belief that the boy is not all
he pretends to be, for he is great deal
more. He Is an incomprehenslble fel-
low to any one but another boy, and
because he Will presently grow into
the awkward between hay and grass
period that separates boyhood from
manhood, and to numbering idiot
then. don't signify that he is an idiot
now. He never is. But his chrysalis
state letters him and makes him seem
like one sometimes.
The boy is all right.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04
He Succeeded.

A man arrested for murder bribed an
lriShman on the jury with 1900 to
hang out for verdict Of manslaugh-
ter The jury were out a long time
and tinnlly came in with verdict OF
manslaughter. The man rushed up to
the Irish juror and said: I'm obliged
to you, my friend. Did you have n
hard timer"
Yes" said the Irishman; "an awful
time. The other eleven wanted TO &c
quit yer."-London Answers.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04
WRESTLING WITH RUSSIAN.
The Traveller wanted n Towel and
Finally Got IL.

Finally 6Ot II.
A. IL. Savage Lander, In his book of
travel. Across Coveted Lands" re-
lates an amusing railway incident that
occurred In Russia while he was en-
route to Persia.
Unable 10 get at my towels packed
in my registered baggage and ignorant
of the Russian language" he says, Il
inquired Of a polyglot fellogy passenger
what was the Russian word for towel.
so that | could ask the guard for one.
'Palatiensi.' said he. and | repeated
'palatlensi, palatiensi, palatiensi, 30
as to impress the word well upon my
memory. Having enjoyed a good wash
and a shampoo and dripping all over
with water. | rang for the guard, and,
sure enough. when the man came /
could not recollect the word. At last II
dawned upon me that II was 'palahn-
ski, and .paiatienskf l asked OF the
guard. To my surprise the guard
smiled graciously. and. putting on
modest air. replied. 'Palatinski MET
paruski' Il do not speak Latin, | speak
only Russian9. and the more | repeat
ed ,palatipskl,' putting the infection
now on one syllable, then OF the other.
10 make him understand. the more fat
tered the man seemed 10 be. and mod
estly gave the same answer.
This was incomprehensibie to me IN
til my polyglot fellow passenger came
to my assistance. 10 yoH know what
you are asking the guard be said in
commissions Of laughter. Yes. ] an
asking FOR a palatinski-a Towel No.
yoa are not and be positively went
into mysteries. 'PAlafiask means DO
you SPEAK Iatlny' How can Esu eI-
y.ert Russian railway guard - SPEAK
Latin. Look how t1ce1sea - pro-
nan : 3; beng r1ist2se2 - 4 L@t-3
scholar Ask hin ~ sGasszazs- azs1
be vi IN "a rswsl
TIE nan a53 rua % - zxsse w'sr3
beng prunoz.ce1 SD @zig 7ssE-rsss
with a nv clsAa p4EtroszSL wa-a2-
hov~se-. v4s = lg-se u~s p -. .ec
Aaa IT rs tt--e 60 6-x ~ IL Ii .izcsl
processes g: 6-s9qsaS ev4s.s-z .ss1-
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04

1t is told OF Confederate veteran
who fought In the Spanish war that In
moments of excitement he thought he
was fighting the Yankees. A biogra-
ply of Kinglake. the historian, contains
a similar story of Lord Raglan, vet
eran of the Napoleonic wars.
In 1854 Raglan went to the Crimea.
Two French officers were attached to
his headquarters.
Several times the staff was embar-
raised and amused at Lord Raglan's
habit, due TO old peninsular associa-
tions. of calling the enemy 1.-The French"
In the presence of the foreign guests.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04
q Wet uwsre,,..

Never hare an umbrella sta ndlng on
the point in the ordinary way when
wet The water trickIes down, spelling
the silk and making the wires rusty. II
II also mistake TO open IL and leave II
standing. az this stretches the silk,
making II baegy 40 that 1t IL impossi.
bic to fold IL smoothly. The proper
way 10 10 shake out ms much of the
water az possible, then stand the um-
brella on Its be adle to drain.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04

A young woman living in suburban
village turned her graceful talent for
dancing to account by carrying on the
instruction of the young folks in the
neighborhood In that art. At the be-
ginning of the term her class was at
tended by an awkward, overgrown girl
who was much In need of such culture.
She was the daughter OF n local under
taker. After two lessons she discon-
tinued attendance, and one of her ac-
qualntances asked her why she had
given up her lessons.
Well" said she. Miss Blank never
patronizes my father. and so | won't
patronize her school" - Philadelphia
Ledger.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1903-03-04

In buying gems always beg, buy or
borrow microscope and examine the
stone carefully through the telltale
lens Flaws Invisible to the naked eye
which depreciate or entirely destroy
the value of the gem will be easily rec
ognized. II IL really throwing money
away 10 invest In costly stones without
this examination. as many jewel lovers
have found to their cost.-Good House
keepiuE