New-York tribune., 1903-04-08
THE TALK OF THE DAY.
favor.

A story is told OF the experiences of the late Sir
Edwin Landseer with a London dog fancier Sir
Edwin was painting the portrait Of valuable dog.
which, before he had finished was stolen from its
owner The painter undertook to find the animal.
offering reward of $50 He summoned to his aid
one "Jem'' Smith. who. he thought. might put him
on the right track. He showed the man the pict-
ure and the banknote, and promised that II the
dog were restored no questions should be asked.
'Jeul" Smith said he would do his best, and went
his way. Six weeks later "Jenl'' Smith arrived at
the studio, leading the missing dog by a piece OF
string. rs this the dorg, Sir Edwin?" There was
no need to the question. for the animal was the
very picture of his portrait. Here is your ten
pounds" said the artist 'and suppose must ask
no questions But Row that the affair is done With
you may just we'll tell me all about It After
a moment of hesitation the man confessed that he
himself was the thief. 'Youi you laundering
rascaIr' exclaimed Sir Edwin. Then. why on
earth have you kept in suspense all this timer"
well. yer see. guvnor." was the answer, Il stole
the dorg. but the gen Gilman sold him to KEEP I'm
SO Jolly close that hadn't a chance Of nickns
him again TIL yesterday and that's the truth. s'ep
me-
Knew That Didn't Pay.-Mrs. Woody Ruyter-
what does your husband do for living?
Mrs. Kautton (haughtilyl-Hes an author ~.
say what does your husband do for a livtng?-
philadelphia Press
An anecdote is related of Mr.. Justice Lawrance,
one of England's criminal judges, who. when a
thief. He admitted that the stolen watch had been
found on his client but argued that the man had
given the plainest demonstration or injured inno-
cence Gentlemen, when the constable arrested
him. what did this poor man dof Do! Why he did
exactly what you I. or indeed any innocent man
would have done In similar circumstances. He
took the high line and told that constable to go
to the devil!" Listening to counsel who spoke of
halter as alter, Mr.. Justice Lawrance suddenly
asked the clerk. us this criminal court?' Learn
tbaff 4 he ed right:
but thought had strayed into ecclesiastical
inquiry"
Nellie isn't very handsome. but his face lights
Belle-Is he So lantern jawed as all that?-CPhila-
delphia Record
His skull was fractured but bones
broken" says The Topeka Capital In recounting
that a citizen had been run over by g. streetcar.
"Once more we aroused to the suspicion that
the Topeka intellect is cased in gutta percha.
1.-The Kansas City Journal"
To Avoid Confusion-The stranger-And you
are named George Washington. the our
distinguished President?
The Colored PorterYaas, sub. but has df
ferunt birfday suh.-(Brooklyn Life.
Chicago householder has freed his mind In
card" in the papers. addressed to ell persons
willing to do general housework: IF you and
stay long enough to create mutual feeling of ad-
m.ration and you think live too far from State
St. we will sell home and move downtown. If
you don't want 10 wash your own clothes will
send them with my laundry and pay for them. If
you don't like to wait table will the
kitchen into a cafeteria and all walk and wait
on ourselves. Sometimes l don't get home din
ner until : O'Clock and If is too late you can
have 1t any time, for there is roadhouse three
blocks from the house where always get
cheese sandwich Sometimes Sunday ] like TO
have breakfast about 10 O'Clock, and dinner about
or 5. but If you want to get out early. you can
have dinner at u sharp. and will try to enjoy
1t. Anyway, 1T will give me a chance to
ball game. We think our children are pretty nice.
but If you don't will turn them out as soon as
the weather permits. The ana you have sep
arate rooms the third floor She is very adylike,
but If she is Objectionable to you in any way will
let her go. My wife will try very hard TO please
YOU but if you don't like her I will let her Well
anyway, these things have mentioned are some
of the trihes which have caused many a labor
strike in our home. But they could all be remedied
if we only have perfect understanding when you
sign with us.
The fisherman now overhaus
His lines and rods and files
And grimy smiles he recalls
His stock of fishing lies.
-Phladelphia Record.
Congress appropriated s12 10000 for the rural de-
livery service during the next fiscal year begin
ming July l. and the department. will establish
15 oo new routes the money On March l5
there were IA O95 routes already in operation. and
nv July 1 this number will be increased by the
natural growth OF the service TO 5000 routes
Thus II is expected by the end OF the next fiscal
wear which VIII be June so. 1894. to have $4,000
rural carriers in motion and Is ZOO 900 people living
outside of and cities will have their letters
and newspapers delivered daily at their doors.
A Possible Explanatlonsn.It has been TO, found by
nps snp r,aora women than men i'm Indiana"
closets for the Indiana men who are writing poe
-ncbtcaco Record Herald.