The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1903-11-12
CARNEGIE A VICTIM
OF LAWSON S SPLEEN
Branded as a Fake" by BOs-
ton Financier.
HIS WIT OF THE 9 1-s VARIETY
Thus Quotes His Relentless Critic, Who
Also Asks "How About the Poor
People Caught in Steel7"

F'lippant sarcasm concerning the phil
anthropy and methods of Andrew Car
negie characterizes a letter sent cut by
Thomas w. Lawson. the prominent Bos-
ton financier and capitalist. The letter
reads as follows:
The panicky feeling. which is spread
ing throughout those cities and towns
on the waiting list for free Carnegie
libraries. that the awful slump in United
States Steel common and preferred will
cause the giant philanthrOpist of Home
stead TO plug up his hogshead of dol
lars is as senseless as it is unjust. It
also cruelty reflects upon this great
Scotehman's 9is intellect and superhu-
man foresight
when the philosopher of Homestead
first found himself in possession of alb
soiute proof that the people OF this
country and bonny Scotland were pin
ing. after the fashion CT a secondhand
Highland thistle bloom, for 'Munckau-
sens Tales. 'Ananias Tours of Wall
Street. Sam Ward on Terrapin Mary
land. The Voyage Of a Gondola in a
Lake of Spaghetti How to Get Three
Pheasants With One Shot in the Moor
lands, and other necessary works of
ancient and modern brain and soul
food. he decided 10 devote the remain
der OF his DAYS and early evenings 10
pushing this particular pining into per-
manent obscurity: and when his de-
cisiOn was made the waiting list can
rest assured ii was a 100 to ] shot he
took no chances of having any holes
punched in his decision by the future
gyrations OF steel stocks
Biting Sarcasm.
He quickly inventoried the different
scrap heaps and junk piles OF everything
marked Carnegie at prices they had
been worth, were worth. should. might,
or ought to be worth, and. casting up the
total and throwing in the price OF a few
States OF European principalities for
good weight, issued his now famous
ultimatum: When in the course of hu-
man events Il becomes necessary for
a Woodworking ironmonger to supply
reading matter 10 the two greatest
countries on earth, II Is the duty OF
all investors. spectators and get-rtch-
quick warriors TO give to the said iron
monger the requisite wherewithal.
Therefore I. the phiianthropist OF Home
stead. do now and forthwith demand OF
said investors. spectators and set-rich
quick hustlers sum which shall
amount in the aggregate to $500. 00o. 900.
Yankee dollars. and may the Lord have
mercy on the souls and pocketbOoks OF
the American people II too much time
IS consumed by the messenger boy who
Is TO return with their answer TO,
81 Yours truly. philanthropically.
CARNEGIE.
What followed the issuing Of Car
negie's edict IL now suspended from the
hstrack in the hall OF history, and
those city councillors. selectmen. and
village keepers of the portfolio who are
becoming unduly excited through fol-
lowing the acrobatic stunts OF the Steel
stocks should unctionize their troubled
spirits with this mot from my coming
calendar:
Him who got and has il nailed.
Hoped, and roped, and firmly baled
Can harken 20 the margin call
And calmly watch them rush the ball
with an abiding conviction that II
worst comes TO worst. or even worse
than that. the Homestead philan-
thropist's urderiying-overtoppi side
tapping mortgage can. at the proper
time, so completely envelop this billion
lied trust that there Will not be a
stray hammer or spike left outside 70
mark the spot where once rocked the
cradle that contained this giant In
dustrIal baby that viii not again be
the sole property OF the philanthrOpist
in whom their hopes are centered.
Should Right the Wrong.
The howl that has been Tesounding
through Wall Street the pas- few days.
for the Homestead philan ShrOpist TO
come forth with S1O.oOO.OO0 to stay the
decline IN the Steel stocks. and thereby
balm the Iacerated hearts and minds Of
the thousands upon thousands of
widows and orphans who have been
coocd into investing their all In his
creation. Is not only idiotic but insult
ing 10 Mr.. CarneBie's slt intelligence
sl0.OO0.0o0 to be paid out for the froth
upon the foam resting upon the lake OF
water which covers his ledge Of under
lying mortgage. when this $1,000, 0O1
would buy-oh, so many, so many works
OF Imagination, observation and Iunif-
cation as We uld compel miles upon miles
OF press notices-absurd. And Wall
street can rest easy shat this big-heart-
ed Yankee Scot will 90 no such foolish
thing.
Anyway, Wall Street owes II TO IT.
self TO do all In its power TO disa buse
the minds Of Steel stockholders that
there is any chance OF their sliding any
part OF their indiscretions on 10 the
broad and generous shoulders Of the
philanthropist Of Homestead.
Better Ter than rising prior.
Better too than dividend,