Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1903-05-23
= - SHES
90 a oEE
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"Why do you think the affair is pla-
tOnicT Because neither has any
money and both want it."-Chicago
Post.
Lizzie-"Does CHIMNEY know how to
make lover" Aggie-"Sure! He hain't
been caddie two years fer nutt'n!'-
Puck.
Revised Proverb.-Take care of the
pennies, and after while the dollars
will take care of Pennsylvania
Punch Bowl
He-Are you superstitious? She
Not bit. Howell then, l can make
a clean breast of it. You are my thir-
teenth bride.-New York Sun
Kate-Is there much difference in
their social position? Nell-Oh, yes.
Her father gets salary, and his faith
er gets wages. -Somerville Journal
A Pleased -Patience-"She
says some one was pleased to hear her
talk for an hour" Patrice-" Perhaps
she was talking to herself. "-Yonkers
Statesman.
| AlS 80 luollSIi, Sdtu inc tHc III
white. "Foolish?" returned the one
in gray. Yes. Why. he wants me
to marry him. "Oh, then he is fool
ish,"-Chicago Post.
The Agent have a chronometer
here which records the millionth part
of second of time. The Busy Man
l haven't got that much time to give
you.-Yonkers Statesman.
How about the rent of this house
of yours, Filter? Doesn't the landlord
ask a good deal for it?' Yes; he of
ten asks five and six times a month
for 1.-THE New Yorker
Mr. Hippo Here's bill for $3.50 for
dress. Thought you said that goods
was only dollar yard? Mrs. Hippo
That's correct but 1t took 100 yards
to make it.-Chicago News.
40 you believe in luck 2" some
times. See that fat woman with the
red hat over there?" Yes" Twenty
| two years ago she refused to marry
me, Cleveland Plain Dealer,
"Do MINISTRIES take in this town. in
| quired the advance agent of the Colos-
| sal Black Cork Troupe. We'll. tho
last that were here did" responded the
inn keeper, sourly. Chicago News.
You have great admiration for your
wlfe's judgment" said the friend Il
have answered MIR. Meekton. She's
the only woman who ever said yes
when | proposed to Washington
| Star.
Palette You'd be surprised if you
knew the amount of time spent on that
canvas" Pellette-"Yes; | understand
men have stood in front of it for hours
trying to make cut what 1t is."-Yon-
kers Statesman.
"Who originated the remark 1t is al
ways the unexpected that happens?'
Il don't know said the melancholy
government attAche, but | suspect he
worked in the weather bureau
Washington Star.
my gracious! dear" said the Chi
cago bridegroom. you were awfully
nervous during the ceremony. Yes,
It's my nature" replied the fair Chi
cago bride. Il suppose I'll be just as
nervous the next tlme."-Chlcago
| Tribune.
Ascum-"How are the plans for your
new house coming along" Subbubs-
"Splendidly. My wife has finally laid
out all the closets she wants. and now
all the architects got to do is to build
! IL n, al
phia Press.
A Bigger Family. Miss
Woodby was saying, my eldest sister
married one of the Vanden GIFTS, of
| New York" You don't say" replied
Miss Pepprey; "a first cousin of mine
married one of the Joncses of the
United States. Philadelphia Press
| Not Too Precipitatc.- "Ah, Jean,
dear" she said TO the duke, why don't
you 20 to papa to-day? Delays are
dangerous. you know" yes, realize
that" he replied, but I've only known
you three days, and these get-rich-
quick schemes always seem TO be SO
risky" Chicago Record Herald.
She Suffered. lie stood in the door
way, hat in hand, and the suffering
young lady was inviting him to call
again. Come around S-ss-s-s," she
began trying to say Sunday, but the
sentence was never finished. The dog
thought she meant "sic EN-" aud he
did.-Kansas City Independent.
Would Help Her Out.-Mrs. Hiram
You may stay until your week Is up,
Bridget, but when you 20 must tell
you | won't be able to write you let
ter Of recommendation, Bridget
Don't let yer want Of eddication inn
barrass ye, madam. Ofll write il fur
We. an ye can make yer mark to it
Philadelphia Press.
A Busy Day: Hallit What's the
/ matter, Klay? You look all tired out!
Klay-And no wonder I've had
hard day of 1t. / don't know when
z Il