Tazewell Republican. [volume] (Tazewell, Va.) 1892-1919, 1903-11-26
ToNsoRIAL ARTIST.
Western Schedule of His oualifica.
tions.


The report that New York barber
who has just died was the Cham
pion tonsorial artist Of the world"
will be received with incredulity by
a discriminating and analytical pub
lie. The bare fact that he established
a record of hair cut in seven min
utes is utterly unconvincing. In fact,
1t is distinct evidence of the fallacious
nature of his claims. He may have
shipped OFF the requisite amount of
hair in the seven minutes. Possibly,
too, the subject on whom he operated
was presentable when he had finished.
But the essence of an artistic hair
cut does not consist in the mere ex-
cision of certain quantity of the hir-
suite covering of the head.
or course, this is at the bottom Of
1t ALL But so is meat the foundation
Of q dinner. Yet no sane man would
consider a meal Of meat alone as
equalling the properly diversified
menu Of the experienced cook. A hair
cut, to be thoroughly complete and
satisfactory, must have certain ac-
cessories which could not possibly be
provided in the seven minutes Of Lu-
ca Francia, the New York champion"
Every busy man depends upon his
barber for comment upon the news
Of the day. Besides, he expects to
pick up large amount of incidental
information from the talk Of the 9TH
er workmen in the shop. He counts
that hair cut wasted in the course Of
which he fans to learn what the
United States ought to do about the
Panama Canal and what sad dogs Dick
and Charlie are. and how the boss
will give them the can If they don't
watch out 1t takes time to get at
this information. Seven minutes
wouldn't begin to be enough.
Besides the intellectual features Of
the hair cut, there is a series of clos
ing exercises which would have to be
severely curtailed if the operation
we're to be concluded within the time
limit specified. These begin with the
suggestion, Better have 1t washed
out?' put forward with the assurance
that no other course than acquie-
scence is possible. When the hint is
politely declined there comes the OBJ
servation about the terrible lot Of
dandruff" in the hair. If this brings
no results it is suggested that You
better use something for 1t; won't
have any hair before long If you
don't" And the merits of mighty
fine dandruff cure and hair tonic on
sale in the shop are seductively de-
scribed.
AS soon as the dandruff incident Is
closed comes the discussion as to shay
ing round" or straight down the
side" This is followed by the debate
over combing wet or dry, which fire.
quently involves a series of contor-
lions on the part of the subject to
dodge the stream from the bottle
poised over his head before he In
aware of what is going on. Finally,
the question of the manner of comb
ing is to be settled, and the protest !
to be made against the inevitable
"roaching 1t up in front"
A bare outline Of the process of the 7
well conducted hair cut is sufficient to
demonstrate the essential falsity Of
Francia's claims to the championship. |
At least a half hour is necessary for
the job when all proper frills are
thrown in. Francia may have been a
good hair cutter according to his
lights. But he certainly was no
champion tonsorial artist" as art
lists" are rated in the "ellte tonsorial
parlors" in Kansas City, where the
BARRIERS are all graduates and operate
on the authority Of a certificate
Kansas City Journal.