The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1903-01-08
He LAUGHsA1G GERMS
Robert Harper Has Lived More
Than 100 Years Despite Their
Reputed Ferocity.
He Thinks Himself a Living Refu
tation Of Sir James Crichton-
Brownies Theories.

. ~, : & :
1.-THE oyster is a torpedo, is it? Well,
well, never should have dreamed it
And SO potato, I'm thinking, must be a
bon1bslell What a number Of batteries
I have charged, after GIL! have a mind
to make my application for the Victoria
cross Or perhaps I ought to have d
pension. All, but the Irishman is
brave boy, isn't he, .,z.a q
It was so that Robert 6. Harper, the
we'll know centenarian of 1719 Elliot ave-
nue., congratulated himself yesterday,
his bright blue eyes twinklings with jol-
litE. He had been eating oysters when
ever he could get them for more Athan a
century, and he wasn.t-a bit terrified to
learn that DR.. Sir James Crichton Browne
X. Y. T., Of London, had lately described
the dainty cousin of the clam as "a po-
tential torpedo Dr. Crichton- Browne
had also warned people that it is no longer
safe to live. s Mans only security lies in
immediate suicide. For he is now eating
food, $50 soft. pulpy and peptonized'' that
he can't resist the microbes and bacteria
that makes faces at him from every line
upon his bill of fare; "All foods" de-
clared Sir James, need enforced protec-
ton from bacterial; contamination. An
tiepticism must enter, to some degree, into
! all of our daily life and must regulate both
our shopping and our cooking
| Maybe it should" observed Mr.. Harp
er after glancing at the reported lecture.
| maybe, anti-sep-ti-cisin should . cone
home in the market basket and be stirred
up in the stew. But that is an ingredient
| that we never used to pay for. Perhaps
| they threw it in at the shop. But we
wouldn't have missed it.
| Now, I was more than 80 years old
before I ever heard of nicrobe or a bac-
terium, and I've never seen one Of the
little devils yet. TIL be 1O5 II 1 live TIL
the 3oth Of next july but I'm not afraid tt
| look an oyster inAthe face.
| mo doubt the scientific gentlemen have
good reasons for warning US not to get
born. But if these germs. are so numer-
Gus they must be:@rather feeble in a
scrimmage. / never bothered about them
suppose I have poisoned myself fatally
100 times. if microbes lived at the same
time as Napoleon--I doubt it though II
they knew what was good for EN- But
| never was sick in my life until few
years ago, long after the heather beasts
had been invented. And then I sent fol
a very scientific doctor. He said ] ha6
pleurisy with compli- cations For the
pleurisy, no matter" said he, tit's moth.
ing. But I'll give We something for thu
complications He did that, and + fel
down breathless after the second dose
Then I had myself bled in decent, rea,
sonable fashion to cure me Of the medi
cine. and pretty soon I was better thar
before ever got sick. ia + g. ''' =
Where I was born, in Ireland, in 1898
we had good spring water and we neve
boiled it before drinking, you may sa,
your beads on that. We wanted our foo,
we'll cooked and clean, of course But W
! never stewed our celery to remove TIL
germs, and we never pared our plurns O
cut away the dangerous strawberry. skin
We liked fresh air, to be sure But w
couldn't sleep sounds Until we'd tied GU
night caps under our" chins and pulled tn
bed curtains tightly all around our beds.
i've always preferred plain food wit
:: meat once a day and very@seldom any pi
or pastry I.take:a a. little whisky or win
7 when think i, reallmtneed lit, but I wa
never fegu4ars drmke1sts Z began smols
: ing sixty eight years Hsp. Ia rathe
smoke a pipe than a cigars it's more sat
isfying. ButsI think too much tobacco
bad for a mans nerves when, he begin
to get along lin years, so I intend to tape
off on smoking before long. + usual
drink tea instead Of coffee; IF the tea
D over strong I don't rest well. FOtherwis
I*sleep like, a; top. I've just been ,readin
| The Toronto Mail,s you see, witho,
t glasses; and excepting that I'm some
: what hard Of hearing, I'm every whit 9
d we'll as was at the age Of 40. But II thu
n DR.. Sir James isn't mistaken, ought
d be scattering flowers over the top Of m
}, own gravel. 'e%t-* go t. -. -"