Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1903-07-25

on pT1nUSnOp uOOT are Only w
keep out the swarm of delinquent
subscribers. Such small insects as
cats and flies generally meander
through them at will.
A stray cat meandered in the
other day and jumped up on the
corner of my desk. You will note
that I have used that word mean
der" twice in rapid succession, but
it doesn't cost any more than the
shorter and less euphonious word
''strolled"-and gives your remarks
a sort of aristocratic sound as if
you had four dollars worth of
education. That word ''euphonious''
is also nice word-so is aesthetic. !"
I have young lady friend who
always uses aesthetic" when she
wants to subdue her hearers. It's
nice to be able to use big words
it throws people off their guard
and enables you to pick their
pockets. I met drunk man the
other day who told me he was a
college 'grasherwate" and when
sober could sling words into the
common people that they couldn't
find in the dictionary. He offered
to sling a few into me if I would
set up the beer. But the cat about
which remarked awhile ago was
buried in the pile of exchanges it
clawed off onto itself / don't like
cats, but l felt sorry for this one-for
some of those exchanges were soggy
with editorial brains. But the cat
crawled out and tried it again and
I gave it Jack handed slap that
left splotch of maltese hair on
the wall and caused it to blink its
eyes and lick it's whiskers as much
as to say: Nov what the deuce
did you do that forr'
But the flies. have lured a few
of them onto the fypaper in various
ways and most Of them are there
yet. Sometimes they got away.
One will circle around and buzz its
wings gleefully and then alight
on the paper as gracefully as a
school girl sliding down a straw
stack, but the next instant there is
inaugurated a most terrific struggle.
The first frantic efforts to get
away last but an instant. Some
times Mr.. fly succeeds in pulling
his feet from the mire, but general
ly he doesn't If he fails in his first
effort he stops stark still for a
second or two and thinks it over
and if you listen closely, you can
hear him calculate Now this is a
pretty kettle of fish" Then he
carefully lifts his right front foot
and feels around for a dry solid
place to put it down. But he doesn't
find it. Then he tries to get his
left foot loose and in doing SO he
gets his right one stuck. Then he
rears and tears and-faps his wings
till he gets both front feet loose
but when they come up-he falls
back and sticks himself down by
the rear of his anatomy. Then he
thinks it over some more and con-
cludes it's better to have his front
legs fast and by sticking them down
he pulls his body loose. He is now
pretty well tuckered out and rests a
long time. Then comes the final eff
fort. He strains his legs till you
can hear the joints crack, beats the
air with his body all at once. But
it's no use and he sinks over ex-
hausted on his side and that's the
last of him.
Poor f1y-he has his counterparts
in human life. A man sails into
the world with a great blare of the
trumpet sometimes but he doesn't
always light where he expected to
and his feet get stuck in the mire
of adversely He struggles for a
while and then he sits down in the
mire as the fly did and holds his
head in his hands and things it over
awhile and rises up and struggles
some more. But it's no use and at
last he gives it up and sinks. I
could help the fly to life and liberty
by extending my pencil point to it
but it's struggles amuse me and I
watch it.
POTOSI TO HAVE A BANK