davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11
NxT.cNs AND LAUGHS.
The variou.: ways Different Peoples
Have of showing Mirth.

The NnrtOu'; ways Dinerent PeOples
Have of showing Mirth.
All the word laughs, though the ma
tions have different ways OF showing
mirth. The Chinese laugh Is not as
hearty or as expressive as the Euro
pean or American. 1t is oftener II tit
ter than n genuine burst of merriment.
There is little character or force in II.
AS for the Arabian laugh, we hear
little of Its hilarious ring through the
ages of mirth In the old world. The
Arab Is generally stolid fellow, who
must see good reason for n laugh or be
surprised into II. In Persia man who
laughs Is considered effeminate, but
free license Is given to female merrl-
ment.
One reads Of the grave Turk" and
the "sober Egyptian" but 1t Is not re-
corded that they have never moments
of mirth. when the fez bobs or the veil
shakes under the pressure of some par
ticularly good thing" In Mohammcd
himself Christian writer's have noticed
cordiality and jocoseness, and they say
there Is good ringing laugh in the
prophet, with all his seriousness.
An American traveller In Europe re.
marks the Italian mirth as languid, but
musical, the German as deliberate, the
French as spasmodic and uncerain, the
upper class English as guarded and not
always genuine, the lower class Eng
lish rs explosive, the Scotch of all
classes as hearty and the Irish as roll
licking.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11
Older Still.

Major Pond. the lecture manager.
was negotiating with John Kendrick
Bangs for the latter's talk on "The Ev-
olution OF the Humorist." The major
made some inquiries as TO the scope Of
the lecture, and Bangs replied that It
began with Adam and Eve and came
down to the present day.
cant you give 'em something older
than that?' the manager asked joking.
ly.
The funny man reflected for mo-
ment and then said. 81 might work in
some of your jokes II you think the au-
dience will stand it."
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11

Mrs. Nuritch-Alrs. Betterdaze told
me she was going to send her boy to
you for II job.
Mr.. Nuritch-Yes. she sent him, and
turned him down proper You'd ought
er seen the high handed letter she sent
with him: said she sent him TO me be-
cause he must have work of some
kind. even II he had to work for mere
pittance." The nerve Of her calm me
names like thnt!-Philadelphia Press.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11

What tremendous power an eagle ex-
erts when carrying away lamb that
weighs, say, sixty pounds or over! If
you take the weight of the bird togeth-
er, seyenty-slx pounds, then 1t appears
that an eagle can develop more
than two horsepower and must put
a strain of over 1,100 pounds on the
muscles of the wings, which leads one
to think that birds are stronger than
mathematics"
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11
A Touching Consent.

The Youth-Sir, came to ask your
consent to my marriage with your
daughter.
The Old Man-Is your income sufii-
cient TO support wife?
The Youth-It is. and In addition to
that 1t is sufficient to enable me to
stand an occasional touch from my
wife's father.
The Old Man-Say no more, young
man. She's yours. Bless you, my son.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11
" Don't Know
How | Got
Such a Cold"

Most of us have heard this en-
preston many times.
Did you ever notice that the
Don't know how got it cold
is bad one to get overI That
before you are through with the
hoarseness, the cough, the eight
feeling" the general discomfort,
and the out of sorts sensations,
you are apt to have another such
cold, and so on until it hangs on
for weeks
These colds mean that your sys-
TEN is out of gear. They usually
precede serious diseases like con-
sumption, bronchitis. They are
dangerous.
We have found a remedy for all
sorts of colds, coughs, that is not
a so-called cough-ctre. 1t does
not stupefy with opium, nor fill
the system with vicious drugs.
1t is Vinol. We are perfectly
willing to tell any inquirers at our
store what it is made of and how
we came to take hold of it.
1t certainly does the work. Old
coughs go off like magic. 1t even
relieves people far gone in con-
sumption. People right in town
have proved it. We sell it subject
to guarantee - money back if it
doesn't help you. Isn't it foolish
to put the matter off
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11
MisInntched.

Mrs. Greene-They tell me your hus-
band has been decorated by some for
eign ruler.
Mrs. Brownies, but it's only bit
OF ribbon, and 1t doesn't match my
complexion at all. When Charles wears
it anywhere. he'll have to go without
me.--Boston Transcript.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11

J.B. HUTCHINSON j. X. WOOD,
70. Gen Manager HIn,g oauv %. Ss Gen; Pas AZ
risburg and principal intermediate stations,
arriving at Philadelphia 7:s2 p. M, New
York 1923 p. M, Baltimore 7:30 D. M, WASH
lngton s:B y. m. Vestibuled parlor cars
and passenger coaches, Buffalo TO Pbilade-
40 p. % m."Train 8. daily, for Har-
rlsburg and intermediate stations, ar
riving at Philadelphia 4:25 A. NJ; New FORK,
7.13 II. M; Baltimore, 230 a. M; Washington
4:b A.. N. Pullman Sleeping cars from
Harrisburg to Philadelphia and New York.
philadelphia passengers can remain In
sleeper undisturbed until 1880 A. N.
u :6 p.m.-Train 4.daily for Sunbury, Harris
burg and intermediate stations. arriving at
Philadelphia, 7:22 A. NJ; New York, 9:33
A.. on week days and 1923 A NJ. on SUM-
A. NJ, Pullman sleepers from Erie,
and Williamsport to Philadelphia, and
Williamsport to Washington. Passenger
coaches from Erie to Philadelphia, and
Williamsport to Baltimore.
t2;S p.m.--Train II, daily for Sunbury. Harris
burg and principal intermediate stations, ar
riving at Philadelphia 7:22 a. M. New York
g:33 u. m. weekdays. n033 a. M, Sunday
baltimore 7:15 n. M, Washington S:3D a M
Vestibuled buffet sleeping cars and pas
senger coaches. Buffalo 10 Philadelphia and
WESTWARD
1893 a. m.-Train :, daily for Buffalo via
Emporium.
,:Ss a. m.-Train 0. daily for Erie, Ridg-
way, and week days for Dubois. Clermont
and principal intermediate stations.
800 u m.--Train j. daily for Erie and inter-
3:45 y. m.-Train Is, daily for Buffalo via
Emporium
5:ttp m.--Triin III, weekdays for Kane and
intermedla, stations.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11

"How did you like that play Of rural
life?'
ITS II fraud" answered Mr.. Truliru.
raj. "'Tain't true TO nature. l under
stand AL them farm folks on the stage
stays up till II or - o'clock every night
o. their lives. "-Br ltimore Herald.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11

"He sent copy of his dialect story
down into the country where he stud
led the dialect"
"And did 1t make the natives an
gry?"
"Oh, no; they couldn't understand it."
Chicago Post.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11

Mrs Marrynt- Mamma Is talking OF
closing her huuse and coming to live
with us DO You think you could sup
port both OF MS.
MIR Marrynt-My dear. I can support
you very nicely now, but I'm afraid
your mother would be nsupportable.-
Catholic Standard and Times.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11
To MuIse Him Haupy.

Old Peterby Is rich and stingy. In
the event OF his death his nephew is to
inherit his property. A friend OF the
family said to the old gentleman:
~ hear your nephew Is going to mar.
ry. On that occasion you ought to do
something to make him happy"
Il WILL" said Mr.. Peterby: "Ill pre-
tend that | am dangerously ill."-Lon-
Ion Telegraph.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11
ADprecfatlOn.

"How did you like the music at the
symphony concertY"
Mrs. Torque and got into such a
discussion about its beauty and tech.
mic that really hadn't a chance to lis.
ten to it."-Baltimore Herald.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11
4 Tractable Memory,

II see you don't remember me. SIR"
mo. sir; don't"
I'm Binks. owe you $50"
"Ahl Now that you mention the-ah
SUN, ! remember you perfectly
Detroit Free Press.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11

Mrs Wootby-There's nothing like a
college education to open the way to
exclusive society Since my son start.
ed to 20 to the university he's got into
the -Four Hundred,
Mrs Nctilnty My sons doing even
better M college. He's on the nine
Philadelphia Press.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11
A FisI, story.

"There are rs good fish IN the SEQ as
were ever taken out Of It." remarked
Small to Young. who had been refused
by Moneybng's daughter.
"Yes, ] know, but they are not gold
fsh."-.Ncw York Times.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11
Philadelphia & Erie Railroad Division

In effect March oath, 1902. Trains leave
Driftwood as follows:
EASTWARD
$50 a m-Train ~, weekdays. for Sunbury,
Wilkesbaire, liazeton, Pottsville, Scranton,
Harrisburg and the intermediate sta
tiOns, arriving Mt Philadelphia 6:l3 d. M,
New. York. $50 p. m. baltimore. 600 >. M;
washington, 7;15 y. m Pullman Parlor car
from Williamsport to Philadelphia and pas
senger coaches from Kane to Philadelphia
and WilliamsDort to Baltimore and Wash
ington.
JoHSONBURG RAILROAD.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11

About three days after a man returns
from q trip his friends begin to think
up something to change the subject
when they - him coming. g.-Atchisop
Globe.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11
A Modest Aspiration.

A man was asked recently by the
gruff clerk at the stamp window. after
he had deposited 2 cents. "Weli, what
do you wantY" He answered gently.
IAN automobile. please" Verify, a
soft answer turneth away wrath
Albany Argus.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11
Up In the World.

Are they progressive people?"
'WeIl, few years ago they were no
bodies. and now they can snub whom
they please. Detroit Free Press.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11

The way to lose friend 10 10 have
him get rich while you stay poor.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11

= rrain Di2 Sunday leaves Dubois 40 d. m.
Falls Creek ~ Reynoldsvillei.3o, Brookville
800, Red Bank 6.30 Pittsburg p.3O d. m.
Trains marked run daily; daily, except
Sunday; flag station. where signals must be
shown
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11
In Eject Nay rs, 1902.
Eastern stssdsrd fine.
.HsTwAIl

Train 9oi Sunday leaves Plttsburg oOJ a. M,
lted Bank II 10 Brook Ie ~ ~, KeynoldsviIle
La. Falls Creek i.2q, Dubois ..J5 D. m.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11
HANAU

& out my stock of dry goods clothing ladies'
going to quit business ~ W ~ ~
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11
The LATEST FASHIONS
IN GENTS CLOTHING

The newest, finest cloths,
the latest designs, all
the most fashionable cuts
for the summer season.
Call at our shop and
see samples OF clOth-a
complete line-and let us
convince you that we are
the leaders in our line.
Reasonable prices always
and satisfaction guaran-
teed.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11

Johns & Thompson.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1903-03-11
RIDGwAY & CLEARFIELD RAILROAD
and Connections.
J.B. HUTCHINSON
Gan ManuUar
J. X. WOOD.

IL Vi
For time tables and additional information
consult ticket agents.
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1903-06-12
LAHA|NA WILL NO LONGER
Be A SUB PORT OF ENTRY
Secretary Shaw Orders That Services of Deputy
Collector Shall Be Discontinued After June
3Oth.--Vessels Must Come Here Now

Lahaina will not be port OF entry day OF ulv
Secretary OF the Treasury L. NJ Shaw abolished the little
Maui town SUPPORT the district because
there and l. NJ Netesen will be of sincure after
the end OF this month This be added troubles of
Lahaina which eliminated only few ago when the ec
ature passed by her claims Maui and gave to
her rival, Waiuku
Vessels except ntersand boats will come to Hon
ouu Kauu before putting Laana and good sized
protest expected from the progressive people the
indgnity.
1t all Lahaina and Kooa were estab
ed as supports under the of only conditonay
there wasn't sufficient business the keeping
ports then the Secretary of the Treasury
them Some time Collector Sackabe took the
reference Lahana, under instructions Washington He
found that the being used extent
ceipts of the deputy collector wouldn't begin
office boy let alone $1,000 federal official Hacked
Co. the of the boats which do upon
casion and inquiry made of them the
Stakab learned that it wasn't likely that the port officer would
have another vessel for the remainder of
recommended that the SUPPORT of Lahana be abolished
Yesterday in the mall order received from Secretary
Shaw aboshng Lahana and incidentally cutting off
the salary of the deputy collector after the goth day of June
In his order Secretary Shaw that the SUPPORT Laana
which established March s hereby abolished take
effect at the close OF business June and the services of
Love NJ Vetesen Deputy Collector and Inspector No. Class
stationed that place. hereby discontinued effect
close of bushes the date"
The above all there the ORDER but will be
keep the people Lahana busy for days AS
of fact won't make awful lot of difference
The three vessels that there during the of
will simply have Kahuu Honolulu before
proceeding Lahana. Hacked Co. already raising obec
ons the order of the Secretary the Teasuy and will
unlikely protest will be Washington regard
to the natter
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1903-06-12
Changes Of Captains.

Captain Mcdonald, formerly of the
barkentine Fullerton. has been placed
in command of the new oil-carrying
steamer Whittier. Captain Keegan
has been appointed to command the
big schooner Frank w. Howe. Cap
tain Marstens is the new master OF
the schooner Mahukona. Captain Oh
son has taken the steamer Grace Dol
lar, and Captain Ellefsen has been
given command of the steamer Noyo
Chronicle.
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1903-06-12
STEAMSHIP MAN
ON THE SIERRA
(From Wednesdays Daily.)

Among the passengers en- route to
San Francisco on the Sierra yester-
day was r. A. Alley, Tacoma ship
owner, who has been in Australia in
vestigating the prospects for the es-
tablishment of new line between
Australia and Tacoma. Mr.. Alley was
entirely successful in his mission and
expects to begin business with four
new steamers Immediately. At pres
ent Honolulu will not be included in
the run though if conditions warrant
it this city will be made a regular port
of call. Mr.. Alley is at the head of
the firm of r. A. Alley & Co. and has
connections with the Northern Paci-
fic and Great Northern railroads. 1t
is the intention to run from Vancou-
yer and calls will be made also at
Seattle and Tacoma. The new line
will be a cargo one exclusively, and
new ships have already been charter
ed for the purpose. They are Of 1919,
and 5SS7 gross register.
Other passengers of note on the ST.
ezra are Mr.. and Mrs Barney Pagan,
theatrical people, Commander N. G.
McAllister of the British Navy, Captain
Vincent and Captain f. A. Jones of
the British army.
Hewitt, a celebrated Australian joe
key, is also aboard, as is ID. Price,
New Zealand horseman, who goes to
purchase horses for his stable. ]. T.
Peacock is a member of the New Zea-
land Parliament, and Mr.. and Mrs.
Allan Shaw are known in Honolulu,
having been here with the Worlds
Entertainers.
or the passengers who stopped of
at Honolulu the most prominent Is
Chas. Kaeger of the German govern
ment service. He will look into the
sugar Industry while here.
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1903-06-12
SIERRA WAS LATE
IN STARTING
(From Wednesdays Daily.)

1t was almost six o'clock before the
Sierra got away yesterday afternoon
with an unusually large number of
prominent Honolulu people. The ST.
ezra arrived early from the Colonies;
! yesterday morning and docked at the
Railroad wharf. She had nine lay
over passengers for Honolulu.
B. F. Dillingham; left on the steamer
for business visit to the coast
Mrs. H. C. Brown of the Y. w. C. A.
together with Miss Bacon intend to
go to Boston and other Eastern cities
on an investigating tour.
Mr.. and Mrs. Thos. Fitch are bound
for Nevada, having left the islands for
good.
T. F. Sedgwick, assistant at the Uni
ted States Experiment Station, is en-
route to Peru where he will estab-
lsh an experiment station for the
planters of that country. If he sue
CeedS he Will remain lndennltelyp
though he expects now to return with
in three or four months.
Mrs. C. M. Hyde left for visit
with relatives and does not expect to
return for some time.
F. w. Klebahn of Hackfeld & Co.,
was one of the last passengers to
book. He expects to remain for three
weeks and seeks health on the coast.
Miss Emma Warren was a passen-
ger, returning to her home in Berke-
ley after year spent in the islands
with relatives.
Mr.. and Mrs. C. B. Dyke and a num-
ber of school teachers were also pas
sengers board the steamer, taking ad-
vantage of the low rates offered to
teachers.
Bergers band played at the steamers
departure, though the crowd at the
wharf was not as large as usual, the
public generally being apparently un-
aware of the change from the usual
sailing place.
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1903-06-12

Major W. J. Howe OF having authorized the brutal
fatal whipping several natives held prisoners Laog
Luzon the Spring Politics the said to be
bringing these charges this late day When
Major Howe demanded OF
the refused the ground that the court
would have be held the Philippines and that he did not think
guilty He ordered additional inquiries made in
Philippines though and the result OF these probably caused to-
days order for the inquiry to be made,
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1903-06-12
HUNDREDS NEAR ST. LOUIS
STARVING AND HOMELESS
ST LOUIS June o-he river rising again and the situation
critical Hundreds of people homeless and starving and the
work Of is slow
A Governor Married.
KANSAS CITY, June 9-Governor Bailey OF Missouri was
married today Mrs B. Weed

The marriage of Governor W. j. Bailey, of Kansas to Mrs
Weed simply the carrying out of election promise by the for
When W. Bailey candidate for Governor and D. J.
Hanna Lieutenant Governor discovered that both
single Country all of the attacked thm
half the the talking about the sad
and Lieutenant Governor who bachelors
This talked of much that both finally announced that
they elected They inaugurad in
this and Governor Bailey the first OF the pair
kee, The aneeecton pledge.
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1903-06-12

Chamberlain's Pain Balm has no
equal as a household liniment 1t Is
the best known remedy for rheuma-
tism. lame back, quinsy and glandular
swellings, while for sprains, bruises
burns and scalds it is invaluable. One
application gives relief. Try It. All
Dealers and Druggists sell 1t. Benson.
Smith & Co., Agents for Hawaii
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1903-06-12

When General Mattos landed Venezuela this last time it
that with strong foreign backing he would make des
peratc the presidency from Castro month ago
and had force of eleven thousand under his
command but tho above cabegram indicates that he has lost 1t
Known that dissensons among
rnde him. and this probably the his downfall
than any force that Castro against him
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1903-06-12


GIBRALTAR, June "a boiler explosion on board the British
cruiser Hope seriously injured OF the ships
BENIOUNIF, Algeria, June 9The Fguig evoutonists
port having lost killed and wounded in yesterdays battle with
French troops.
MANILA p l., June o-The Philippine Commission has COM
peted Act providing for the OF the Moos
The adopted by Commission the Moro practical
autonomy independence of colony The is
placed under the direction OF Governor and Council
PHILADELPHIA Pa, June o-Eighty-one firms in this city
yielded the demands OF the textile strikers and large body
of returned work this morning The strikers demanding
shorter hours and increase Six hundred hrms
employing operators affected by the labor troubles
WASHINGTON, c, June 9-Orders issued yesterday for
Rear Admiral Sumner proceed Valparaiso have been revoked
squadron held subject the future commands Of
the Department.
1t quite probable that Coombias delay in the ratification OF
canal treaty change the destination OF the squad
Serious political troubles hreand Bogota and at the
thmus which require the of American ships
vent open outbreak
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1903-06-12
Big Fire in Florida.

WESTPALO, Fla. June 9-Ths town swept by confa
grafton to-day the loss hotels other
ing o $75oooo
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1903-06-12
IF ONE CANAL CAN'T BE
HAD ANOTHER WILL DO

WASHINGTON, June o-Uness the United States Of Colonl-
disposition rafy the Panama Canal treaty negota
tions opening Nicaragua canal will be resumed
with Nicaragua and Costa Rca.
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1903-06-12
Howe Must Stand Trial.

WASHINGTON June o-Maor Howe has been ordered from
Rico Manila undergo investigation of the charges
made against him OF cruelty to the Filpinos
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1903-06-12
CHAMBERLAIN
MAY RESIGN HIS
SECRETARYSHIP
The Total Collapse in Parliament Of
the Protectionists May Have
That Result.

LONDON June GIN the debate the tax the protec
consequence Colonial
Secretary Chamberlain will resign.
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1903-06-12

WASHINGTON June o-Watson Clark, District Auditor has
been arrested charged with defacaon OF 100000 in District of
Columbia funds.
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1903-06-12

POENIX June oGov Brodie has ordered the entire Ierr
oral militia Morenci where miners out on strike
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1903-06-12
A New Philippine Judge.
WASHINGTON June o-Fnley Johnson succeeds Ladd as
Supreme Court judge in the Philippines.

Judge Ladd resigned from the Philippine Supreme Court several
owing His has been District Judge
Philippines. Judge Finley Johnson is Ohio He is a
graduate of the University of Michigan He member OF the
Ohio Legislature from 1883 1887 and then removed to Michigan
where for twelve he member of the law faculty
University OF Michigan and for portion of that time
of the Board of Education He is fortywo old
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1903-06-12
Negroes Pay the Penalty.

FORREST, Miss June 9Fve killed here to-day
and ten thrashed for the murder in ambush white man.
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1903-06-12

CHICAGO June oHerman Wickersham, exPresidentt of th
Park Board is fugitive Fifty thousand dollars of publ
urds in his possession misused.
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1903-06-12
Venezuelan Revolution Ended.

CARACAS, June o-The revolution has ended.