The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-08-23

da,r nanA maker and for me to slow down till dey, could get under way. Slow down! If I'd known what to pull, to slow
 down, I'd puHed it a mile from it's socket
 so just waves me hands for em to follow Il wanted somebody along to DICK up oe pieces-and away l goes!
 I kept de road clear for time wit de fog horn, and nearly everything passed turned and chases after me, until l was
 followed by most of de bikes, mobes and
 fast horses of Westchester County, ana
 began to feel some chesty.
 Dose dat wasn't travelling in anytng dat could keep me in sight gives me good advice on de fly. 'Muffie your exhaust,
 "Uncouple your compounder," Hook up your compensator," dey would yell at
 me; and, trying to please, give sometlng A kick at every good void of advice, and
 de machine would buck and waltz and
 do grapevine twists, but never let up on de gait dat I knew would fetch me 10
 Boston in time for me dinner or me fu-
 neral.
 On de level, dere Is a kind of fun in dat
 sort of going. I spose dats because you
 haven't time to guess what de harvest
 will be. Anyway, began to tink dat I'd
 have de ha-ha on de shuffer when got
 home but just den l. sees ahead or me,
 and coming my way, victoria Wlt US
 hind top up. I knowed 1t for Whiskers',
 because he's de only gent in our parts oat
 uses a victoria on de road, and he always
 has da hack ton LID coming home from a
 morning drive down Greenwich way 100
 keep de sun of.
 T inst had time to remember dat new
 coachman had took Whiskers out oa1
 morning. and dat he looked like a farm
 CT, and would likely tink Ia be minutes
 getting to him, when I'd be seconos, los
 a fact I woiked de horn wit one hanc
 and steered as far to de right as could
 wit de odder hand. but p'chee he was
 turning to his left. He was a Br1usher' see2 When he saw how was comntg he uot de rattles, and turned to de lett de way dey do at home. tries to siVe nuicb turn to de left, and more tlnss nap pened in a second dan you coIiu eisoa uue h O O boolr. De machine slkidded. klckeo a fever dat stopped and revoised ana oe ston xvas so student dat I went on me
 -aR Y ,vjt q coive in de air dat landed me gIancin9 on de victoria top, and from acre E shot off like golf ball dat nAts Iock m de dy, and landed on top or a loau U. !l hev. in de field, and got pitcn1ork oI II | over me dat de 1arIner was
 VI 1,,1st have bumped me coco on a | Sra,71e oF dc carriage top for I was doWn and out till I hears somel one say ., Nny, here he is!' and dey chucks oe nay on
 me and dere was half de folks Tn de County rubbering. 1,,.o-,p I hoars whiskers say. and says, 'Hes' SIT was you wanting anytlng' SIT? ,.,,a,o, wei dev treats me like l was a biooiei ,,st, roA down. and monkies over me tC zee was I broke and all dat dey ooulo | And was a lump on me coco as DIE aS l I,o,,r fist Willy Widdy was in de carrlase a.'It xxy,Islrers and she geves me some
 tina to sniff dat made me sneeze' so | man in a mobe pulls ou tiask ana hs | saws. 'FTIere, young man, snin dat' |, | snifrs about tree fingers Of It. ana II
 nuts me to de good. for fair. Den looks | for de machine, and 1t had ht one ~. Ui
 dose stone walls dey ralses III our our Se r,,S' l and de biggest piece We 1ouhu "f's "e -"' her bulb of de horn. ,,-,-,- asDs
 "I,eaye it dere." says Whiskers, amnu m ,,ot ,,-, on de box wit driver and come | home" he says.
 Did YOU ever hear French goil jaw? A cabby underpaid. and star in poor dressing room uses pretty-pretty Ian gwudge alongside a French goil when she | is doing her best at scolding. When
 Duchess began to plastCr up me oacR where de skin was off, she asks did MT Paul know what kind of deal was l fin for. De more I told her dat he didn't de more she made up her mind dat he dld and if he had heard her opinion or him he would liquidate himself at bargain counter prices. He would rode de ma
 chine as soon as me-" l said' II I'd peer shy on de proposition"
 Ru+ couldn't square MT. Paul wit her | Sba ssid dat dc onIy way he could make
 her believe dat he didn't put up job tC
 make her a widdy, was to tip me well What do you call well?' asks, an'
 Duchess says dat noting less dan two
 dollar would put Mir. Paul to de good II
 her opinion.
 When I'd been plastered up and ruDbe. kAoNn. Roes about me business ana