The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1903-04-24
CoFYRIeHf. 1905

syn az HM Of esteem from our various states
~ 2 men, and their reception has got
How grand 1T II. to be a great an ten to be one of the greatest joys
a md ga ea ssed IS ~ 1e12 tn %irec Of spring: The song of the birds
'' and the dantyperfume OF a myriad
ct buds trelghting the baln1y air ART pleasant, but, after all, what
would spring be without a package of night-blooming squash seeds
straight from some influential members Of congress?
While not now being actively engaged in market gardening, and
While not being able to tell without first looking the matter up whether
you ought to SOW your huckleberres in the dark or the LIGHT Of the
moon, Or whether, on frosty nights, it is better to cover up the tomato
vines with an old shawl or carry them into the summer kitchen, and
while not having, we say, at present any cut:worns or potato bugs
mat we ae trying to fatten UP for the fall market by feeding them
paris green or other forms of kalsomine, still we none the less appre-
c'ate these gifts, and there is no time Of the year when we watch the
'haa's win so mitch tevensh interest and anticipation IS during the
spu'g when the annual supply of castor beans and other table lux,ries
arr pouring in. These gifts always inspire us viii renewed patriot
ISM and confidence in the future of the republic. Last spring at the
n OF a long and most trying winter when we had just about lost
confidence in the republic, we received from you a sky-blue copyof the
census OF Porto Rico, a two-ounce package Of seed oats, a bag OF
oleander bulbs, a vest pocketful Of worthless cabbage seed and a
speech on the navy with detachable jokes, and we began to take a new
view OF lite at once. How grand it is to be a great man and scatter
seeds OF kindness and wax beans in every direction. We believe that
as long as this nation continues in its policy Of malice toward none
and justice and early rose pumpkin seeds toward all it will thrive and
prosper on the face of the earth. " H.
We believe, however, that the stability of the nation would be
greatly Increased if you would send out a hen occasionally accom-
panied by a round o two OF eggs for setting purposes. Perhaps: a
distribution Of mich cows among the voters would also 90 far toward
placing our nation or a frend1ier basis: If No. 6 envelope filled it'll
gooseberry seeds, and a bound table of statistics, showing the number
OF old maids in Massachusetts, who did and who did not wear nose
glasses during the fiscal year ending July l, 1902, will do SO much
toward placing Our nation on the high plane of progress, then what
might we not expect II W e we're to present each of III voters with a
copy of a brown-eyed cow guaranteed not to climb a fence or kick
a hard lead pencil into the chest of her trainer. OF course, how much
benefit the government would derive would depend a great deal on
the traits of character and personal disposition of the COW. -
We remember man who was the owner OF a roam cow that made
his life a deasion, a pitfall and a*snare. She had milo, dreamy ewes.
and a knd heart, but She was cursed with a rowing disposition and an
appetite like a planning: mill Her: home seemed all that she could
wish throughout the day, but at night she would scale the Manager,
climb a stepladder, pick open a paddock, jump three fences and wan
Ger away at her own sweet will among the gardens of that section of
the state, until her proprietor sought her out in the dew morning
and drove her home with a bed4s1at. It seemed to be her greatest
delight to get ont in the poetic stiffness of the night and wander aim
lessly through the vegetable forests of the neighborhood like a lost
and roan-colored spirit, and eat raw rose-bushes and stab her ieet
through the pumpkins and yank the cucumber vines lid bv the roots
and make the entire face OF nature look like it had been hit with =
club. She could get out at night and eat up three front yards and a
cabbage orchard without apparently spelling her appetite ior break
fast. Sometimes her owner would find her calmly grazing in a bed of
strawberry radishes that had just reached the zenith of their usefu1-
ness, and sometimes he would find her chewing the velvet flush and
poetic beauty off a hirty-three-dolar lawn. Then he would belt he,
over the brow with a broom handle and start her homeward while he
tarned to compromise a damage suit with the enraged owner. It
was dscouraging to him to struggle on day after day, vainly irving to
obtain a paying dividend from the net earnings of a sexen-do1ar y,
with a $385 appetite, and he finally gave up trying and donated her to
a theological seminary which soon afterward went into 2 homeless
decline.
And SO if you were to distribute gifts like this among the voters
of the country we believe that the nation could not hope to derive
much benefit But if a gratutous distribution of seed no.
tatoes, wheat germs, spinach, and cold, compressed statistics show
ing the number of males in the United States under the Of three
years who have to support the family if gifts of this kind, WI saw, are
the cause of our great national thrift, then we fail to see wv W. co,,hd
not secure even a higher place among the nations Of the earth, Is e.a1,
voter were presented with a mild COW that had never contracted ~
habit OF wandering forth at night and eating the eternal prospects and
fondest hopes out of every tomato patch and cucumber VINEYARD =
the vicinity s4~ y #
What this nation really needs is greater ,rberality on the mart
Of her statesmen. New or revised legislation may be yerv good =
its place, but, after all, is it Of anyrea1 value? Would it not be
better if we had less1fseggisSIAsaallo and more canary food, less Panama
canal talk and more asanplkszpaekages of beardless oats, less attention
to. Cuba and the tariff and Tbs trusts and more attention to the
number Of verb ppsernssnvelope Hoping Iphn that vi, Nil look
at matters in this light and agree with us that 4 more generous. DIS.
would Be s grand thing for the country VI. beg - remain, Yours, SC: