Rock Island Argus., 1903-09-18
DAILY SHORT STORY
Profit and Loss.

l sold 'em goods and trusted em Wnen
they hadn't no money, for you kin
trust two kinds o. people-them as Is
honest and them as is at open war
with the rest o. the world. It's the
middle classes that beats you. There
was one on 'em-the outlaws, 1 mean
that 1 didn't want around. for he'd
carried things too far and there was
a price set on his head. That was
Dandy Jim. Dandy Jim's head was
git the drop on him.
/ was always a-figurin' how / could
git him in a trap and git the reward.
There wasn't no use in tryin' to do the
Job In an ordinary way. for Jim was
as cool as a cucumber and slicker n a
creased pole. I'd have to fix some
way o. gittIn pint ahead. What I
wanted was a confederate; some one to
do the shootin' while did the foolin'.
One day a young woman come to my
place and wanted to work In my store.
l tole her didn't want woman, but
she said she'd work for her board, and
after taIkin' to my wife about 1t l en-
gagged her. She could do most any
thing, but she was handiest about
keepin' my accounts. She must "a
been a schoolmarm, for one day she
took account o. stock and figured up
and told me 'xactly what 1 was wo'th.
"If 1 could git Dandy Jim," l said
to her, land turn him in dead or alive
I'd be wo'th $1,000"
but they say Dandy Jim's a hard
man to take" she said.
,Iay and I'll try it,
How would you manage it?'
''If l know'd he was a-comin' I'd
post some un outside to cover him.
Then if he got the drop on me I'd sig
nal the outsider to shoot him."
What kind of a signal would you
give? He'd shoot you before you
could make any signs"
"'Well, he'd likely tell me to throw
up my hands, and that would be as
good signal as any"
you're purity smart" she said. 81
didn't give you credit for so much
sense"
One day the gal tole me that the
stock was a-gittin' low, and If she was
me she'd sell the balance and go and
lay in q complete new outfit. She was
sich a sgOod business woman that l
did whatever she said, and got up a
''sale" and cleaned out everything. It
fetched just 81 200 in money, and with
this concluded to put in the new out
fit The day before went away 1 rode
out to collect a debt of $50. 1 had a
safe in which l KEEP the $1,000 on
hand and didn't worry about 1t, for
none o. the outlaws could open it and 1t
was too heavy for 'em to carry away.
The gal tole me l might 8 we'll leave
her the combination in case any one
wanted any bills paid. but I was too
sharp for that. Not that l doubted her
honesty. but that some o the outlaws
might come along and force her to
open it.
Well, 1 got my $50. and when 1 was
a-ridin' up to the store 1 see the gal
a-comin' eXcited-like to meet me.
whats up?" says 1.
DANDY Jim's there waitin' for you"
"Humph," says 1. What's he goin'
to do with me? Kill me?"
"Oh, no; he won't kill you. If you
was dead. who'd open the safer
81 see"
you might do what you said you
would If he came
What was that?"
'Have some one cover him when you
go in and when he tells you to throw
up your hands shoot him."
There isn't man about the place"
Reckon I'll do. I'm as good shot
as any man."
Well, I posted her at a winder with
rife right where she could see the
man, then walked into the house and
the room where Dandy Jim was a-set-
tin. "Howdy, Jim," says. "Howdy,"
says he. "Jim," says 1, there's 81 900
offered for you. Reckon l might as
well have 1t as any one" How you
goin' to git it?' he answers. "Well,
there's two ways. One Is dead and
the others alive-whichever you pre-
fer" 81 prefer dead" says he, land
considerin' I've got my hand on my
gun Thinks it's you that's dead. I'll
trouble you to throw up your hands,"
"If l does that" says, "the drops
on you, seein' 1 got pal posted out
side the winder to shoot you as soon
as 1 raise an arm. 1t is q signal"
You're mighty smart" he says. Its
only takin' time by the forelock." says
1. "Who have you got outsider" zone
o. the best shots in Arizona though
nothin' but a woman" "Yes, and
mighty smart If she is a woman"
"How do you know thatT Because
she's my wife. 1 sent her here to git
you to turn your stock into cash, then
she sent for me to take it in." ''Is that
the game?" asked. cold chill runnin'
down my spine. You can find OUT
he says, ''if you'll throw up your
hands," ''I'll do it," says I, land if
you're Iyin' you'll pay for the decep-
tion with your life"
With that 1 throwed up both hands
and the gal instead O. shootin' comes
to the winder GRIMM, and asks me If |
that was the signal and whether we
hadn't better wait a spell. and If 1t |
wouldn't be cruel to shoot a man in