New-York tribune., 1903-03-31
TEE TALK OF THE DAY.

It seems probable that before long the dogs as
well as the daughters Of rich and fashionable folk
will be sent to Paris finish their education A
school for dogs has been established there. Many
society women already employ maid or man as
a dog attendant. whose duty 1t Is to train and 10
accompany their pampered pets. But II Is now
possIble to send them a school where they can
be taught to bark properly, to bow n greeting ana
farewell. to pick up fan dropped By the mistress
and present it her gracefully. and to walk with
proud and prancing steps
Nothing Doing.-Mrg. Newriche fwho would Ike
the count for son-in-law1-Its true that Count
dEd-Brouck Is inclined TO be nttle-er-Wllo'
but he'll settle down, you know; time works won
ders. -. .r - =.
being in ths miracle business.-CBr Life
ramlin Garland is busy at Washington revising
and changing the names of the Indians on the
government rolls The dispatches do not give clear
information the details Of Mr.. 0arland's work.
but noble redInen who are soon to be full neoseo
citizens OF the United States will no longer be known
to fame and the Indian agent as Lane Horse
Sore Eye. Muddy Foot Young Man -Afraid-of-Hls-
Souav and other titles contemptuously and recK-
lessfy translated into English By those who are
dead to the picturesque Whether Mr. Garland
will change their names back into the original
Sioux or Choctaw," says The st. Louis GLOBE
Democrat ''or merely confer on them the com
Enonplaces that mostly hll our directories, Is not
known. but, since his stories have been ols-
nzuished for the vivdness OF their local color and
a fidelity to the realism Of Western life, we shall
hope for the best. He holds much OF the future
happiness of in his hands Many a mans
life has been as much blighted and made mortiry-
| ing by g foolish name conferred him By his
parents as by wen or other excrOecence. There
are family names, too that have no excuse Tor
being under which whole generations suffer as II
/ there were no surcease in court or legislature.
Some seeu1 20 feel 1t as disgraceful to change an
| awkward or ridiculous name as to dye their hair
or alter what the mistakes OF nature have con-
ferred upon them. If Providence were responsible
] HxyoiI hair
| Ha1nlin Garland is remaining the Indians. lst him
! proceed in g. gentle and humble spirit, remember
ing that no such power has ever before been dele
| gated to human being. One might think that the
| Indians. II they must change their names, Wouio
! like to do 1t themselves
Monument Man-Whst Nada SHAH put on your nus
pelG 4;Gov19h Gay that he wss my hus-
| band. and that he % happy now.-Qdfe
| A move, experiment was tried at wayand. Mass.
| recently at the annual town meeting The cit-
zens' nominating cauCuses were done away with
In lieu Of these candidates for cNice were put in
nomination independently, on the plan that any man
desiring Office could file nomination papers II able
| to secure twenty signatures. required by law. BY
this common consent the part Of the citizens all
| candidates fling such nomination papers stand
equal chance of election, and the number of possi-
ole candidates IS limited only by the ability Of men
to secure signatures TO nomination papers. In Way
land the hopeful candidate is surely ''n the hands
| OF his friends
An Inviting F4eld.-"They say there's an island in
| the Pacific with six hundred Inhabitants, where
drunkenness, crime 1als' police anu courts are IN
rs that so? It's a wonder somebody hasn't start
! ed in to civilize it.'-(Brooklyn Life
! 1.-The PHILADELPHIA Record recalls political
nrsvers made by chaplans Of legislative bodies It
i was inofYendve, but in poor taste when a chap
| lain in the Delaware Legislature prayed: % Lord
thy servants In q deadlock. Give them the
| kew During the last Cuban insurrection a chap
| United
| States might supply with arms IL necessary those
In Cuba who struggling for liberty" and that
we might insist upon uphoding the Monroe Doc
trine'' The chaplain OF the Illinois House prayed
God to contract the capacous NAV of the penal,
reformatory charitable and educational institutions
of Illinois May they learn to be content with less
| money and may who refuse to worship a golden
calf also refuse to worship gold In any other form
! The chaplain of Populst convention in Arkansas
! prayed that the State might be delivered from
| Democratic control In the Colorado Legislature
| Dean Peck prayed that the Populists and Demo-
| Gratis might be resigned to their fate. Populist
| chaplain In Kansas prayed God to palsy the brain
and still the heart of the reasonable consprators
| to wit the Republicans In a Massachusetts cam
paIrn a minister prayed for the triumph Of right
| eousuess and then broke out: 20 Lord. what's the
uss OF beating about the bush? Give US Briggs for
| Governor
scribbler--Would you call yourself a poet or sim
| 'i scTawInrMWeli. when the editor lights his pipe
with my stun. it's case of verse ahre.-tPhiladel-
| phia Record
The Lord Provost Of Glasgow. whose ONCE CORE
sponds with that OF Mayor In this country. told at
dinner recently how he was tipped" by an Amer
lean sightseer. party Of tourists from the United
States were viewing the splendid municipal cham
bers in Glasgow and were especially enthusiastic
about the great marble staircase. The Lord Pro-
vest happened to pass and offered to guide them
| about. While doing he gave them some in
formation about the rise and growth OF his In
terest!ng city. As ne ~as ls@ving one o. me
Americans quietly slipped hs!f-doilar into his
hand The Provost had not recovered from his
amused astonshment when the Americana left the
! building
| MUCH SAFER.
To fudge q man by what he S&yS
Quite often doesn't pay.
better way to tadgs Rim u
i -CPhiisdsphia PresA