New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1903-12-19
A TRAGIC CALENDAR.

Kansas City as coat of tar" Learned Mis-
Eourians say he had in mind coup d'etat"
A TRAGIC CALENDAR
Janet Ian st,y was ta5, quite Ill one day;
Mar-tyrlike she lay in bed;
APPROVED nurses softly sped.
.:Jun-ket would be ,benefciaL"'
Ig ugRRTed lei III t foP 55an fFeSy ed tried
Sep-ulchre was sadly made,
Oct-aves pealed and prayers were said.
Nov-ices with many a tear
-(Caroyn Wells, in Life.
Lord Curzon has been long noted for his cutting
and cold remarks. Some years ago. says the rail-
way official who tells the story. Lord Curzon came
down from London by what then the London
Chatham and Dover Railway, to address a political
meeting at of the Kent coast resorts. Lord
Curzon was in a hurry. The train made its twenty
miles an hour all right but the future viceroy
thought it the sIowest train on earth. He said so
to the guard. That dignitary, as usual took the
remark as personal insult
IF you don't like the speed Of this train, mister
he said, ''you can get out and waikiki
Lord Curzon was not crushed Tart as vinegar
came the reply:
81 would only they don't expect me till this train
gets I'M"
First Boy-I don't like Caesar.
First Boy-Too much Gau.-Cwalking Leaf.
A good story is told by London military paper
of a certain English general who rash enough
to pay a cabman his legal fare for driving him to
the War Office. Instead of proceeding to describe
the salient points of his personal appearance. the
polite Jehu beckoned quietly to one Of the door
keepers. who's that?' he asked. General
Blank" "HoI it?' said the cabman. nodding
wise head; then don't wonder that 1t took
three years to finish the war.
An Aberdeen man, noting woman eating an ice
Being supplied, he took a spoonful and made a wry
face I'm no. Sootin' it's bit fr9stbitten mister
an Ice GOSH Do they eat ice s' in London :"
an skate on t in Aberdeenr-( American
Sir John Harrington, who has been made minister
plenipotendary from King Edwards court to that
of Menelik of Abyssinia, was appointed British
agent in Abyssinia in 1898. He mas done many
things to establish cordial relations between the
two countries. One of Sir Johns great achieve
ments to persuade her late majesty to speak
into photograph message to Menelik and his
Empress. 1t the only time she consented
to such experiment, and it done then on the
express understanding that when the message had
once been spoken the record should be destroyed
Menelik excited when ne heard the great
Queens message in her own voice that he repeat
edly stopped the machine in order to have salute
fired and his Empress was so hattered to hear her
name mentioned that she called out her body
guard as a mark OF respect.
Mr. Nolan had received long tongue lasbinr
from Mr.. Quigey, and his friends We're urging on
b 6l@ pfe use ~ of his sts MS honor BY
But he's more than equal" said Mr. Nolan
obviously. land look at the size of him."
- Sure, and you don't want folks TO be saying
Terry Nolan is coward2'' demanded a reproachfui
friend
well, dunno" and Mr.. Nolan gazed mourn
fully about him. I'D rather that than to have
them saying day afther tomorrow. How natural
Terry Iooks! "-CYouth's Companion.
An interesting piece OF reaches Paris from,
Alexandria 1t IS that, as a concession to French
susceptibilities, the 'Fashoda" Will disan
pear from the map. The scene OF the last eDiso6a
which placed the crown and seal 10 Britatn's mas
terry of the Soudan will henceforward be known a q
Cabak.
At the latest of the ladies' clubs pets room,
with little stalls for dogs and cats lemurs ana
lizards all the small creatures that a ladv Ands
necessary companions, is provided. "9
One of the most enthusiastic members was sbory
ing her friends of her own over the estsbitsb-
ment. and opened the door Of the pets room
with proper pride.
There in the centre of the room on two cbatrs
two Immediately clothed young men, grave ~
face, but with wicked twinkle in their eyes
Don't you know this is the ladies' pets room,
That's why here" replied the more seTi.
Gus OF the two young men, with becoming gravity
-tSporting Times
good story is told in the London papers OF an
Oxford freshman who asked early in the be-
ginning of the term whether he had proved a GER
tain proposition in Euclid. :well. sir he re-
piled. proved is strong word rendered It highly
probable"
~ won't be good" said Willy.
Then Santa Claus won't bring YOU any presents
Wasn't bad last year, and didn't I moran
sVsr?'-lC1ncinnatl Commercial-Tribune