The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1903-10-21

didn't hire nobody to watch de patch.
He kept chickens an didn't hey no
locks on de hen-house doah. ne tent
money an didn't ak for no 1. O. Y.
He signed bonds and notes an didn't
ak fur no security. If he bought newi
he took the odder mans word fur it;
if he sold one he promptly pointed out
de ringbones and spavlns an owned
up dat the beast was about twenty
years old.
''Brudder Watkins, how long do yo'
reckon dat man lasted In Jest nine
years he was in de Doorhouse. an he
nebber dun got out agin. All de rest
of de kentry was watchin' him to see
how de experiment would pan out 1t
was a dead failure an a solemn warn
in. Does yo' ketch on, Brudder Wat
kins?'
II reckon I does, sah." was the re-
DIV.
''Doan' go down to Injianny feelin'
dat yo' am dom de state great favor
by de comm. an doan' attempt to put
on style ober de people yo' meet. If
yO' had nebber bin bon into dis world
de state of Injianny would hey got
along jest de same. She wants yo'r ice
cream an molasses candy, but she isn't
gwine to bust up bekase she doan' git
'eD1
ut will. of co'se. be known dat yo'
am a member of dis Lime Kiln club.
an aldermen, judges, an chen de guv
ner will call on yo' an stop to shake
hands wild yo' on de street. Doan' let
yo'lself git swelled up wild pride. Be
jest proud huff to go right on tendin'
to biZnesS, but not proud huff to bust
to pieces like a biler carryin' too much
steam. Does yo' understand my mean
in, Brudder Watkins?"
| Yes, sab; [ does, Sah.''
/ "Doan' land in Indianapolis wild any
pertickler motto on yo'r banner. Ex
celsior am a very good motto, but it
seldom pans out anything dat de own
J - f@els proud OF. Notices war all right
/ 2OO when land 0ha2n an
- eJuId vote as often as yo' wanted
| to on 'leckshun day, but times hev
changed. In olden times honesty was
de best policy, but in desc days de man
who buys a watch is supposed to count
all de wheels fur hisself. If yo' find dat
yo' kin mix a little con starch wild yor
ice cream, an thus save expenses an
please de people jest de same, yo' will
probably do so of yo'r own accord
Yes, sab; iZe gwine to mix EN-
about half an half snilingly replied
the brother.
Oats heap o. starch, but mebbe
not too much L dOan know how yo'
stand on de matter of chickens, Brud-
community it seems to me dat yo' had
better go slow. Dat am, doan' let yo'r
hankerin' fur chicken git de better OF
yor judgment. Let bacon an codhsh
satisfy yo' until yo hev looked around.
"Yo' am doubtless awar' of de fact
dat de torpedo chicken am an 1nJianny
invenshun, an dat ober $4,000 OF EN-
am in use in dat state. In some cases
whar' de torpedo chicken am in use yo'
will find a red chalk-mark on de hen
coop doah; in odders yo' will take long
chances. Make no decided move till
yo' have bin in Indianapolis fur at least
| a month
II was gwine to say, sab, dat l doan'
keer fur chickens tall"
Den it's all de better fur yo', Brud-
der Watkins; an jest as we'll fur de
chickens Now, about de society IN
: Indianapolis. How do yo' propose TO
MY Wife will gin soiree soon arter
Oats krect. Yo, will find three se IT.
strata am de walters AM BARRIERS; de sec
ond de whitewashers an stoveblackeir rs
de third de common niggers VINO e1 20.
strata to yo'r soiree. 70 must hev ICE
cream. 'lasses candy, an at least one KIN, mo
must not pass around water in a TN olp-
per. If yo' hevent got tunblers nun DER
use a couple o. yaller bowls.
las de host, yo' will be expected to wear
white cotton gloves. a red necktie an 2
new paper collar nebber worn peio. !,
dar am no bell on yo'r doan den hire o''E
fur de occashun- No soirce was eber
success widout a doah bell: If Xo' have
ice cream huff fur three dishes all arouTe
yo' will at once establish yo'rself in de
Now, about yo'r finanshul standin'
was in de ice cream an lasses candy biz
| ness simply to occupy yo'r thoughts while
Waitin' to invest $75, 900 sumwhar 2
mo, sah,'' replied Shindig, Il shant dur
no bra ggin' tall"
Oats right. Yo' needn't tell everybody
dat yo only had II cents left arter reach
in de town an yo' needn't carry de ide5
dat it makes yo tired to cut off vol
! coupons. Take a sort of mlddie course
Pay cash fur what yo' buy, an II De re
port spreads around dat yo am a mli null
aire, don't deny or admit it. Yo' will at
| church RO'SHIe
yes, sah-twice on cherry Sunday in d.
daytime an once in de eavenin'."
dat will gin 'em de impheshun dat 70
am a hustler. I believe yo am BAPTIST
Dat religion am all right, but doan' be J;
a hurry. De Methodist religion am also al
: right If de Methodist church down daT
in Indianapolis has a bell an steepl
on it. an de Baptist church am only
sort O. shed, it might be policy fur 20 I
I line up wild de former. l is sorry 20 sa'
mans religun mo- by de outside looks Q
!, de meetin' house dan how he acts insid
, "Dat's about all. Brudder Watkins. an
: vo' kin feel assured in gwine away fror
h dis club, of which yo' hev bin a menbe
> almost since de first meetln'. dat yo leaV
only friends behind. We shall want t
hear from yo' often an we shall hope t
hev yo'r spirit wild Us at cherry reguia
G meetin'-
v TT am not de custom of de club :
make presents on sich occashuns, but
, give yo' a recipe fur chillblains, an ais
l. tell yo' how to pick out q ripe waterrnil
: Won from a green one on de darkest nigh
IL De rneetin' will now bust up an go alon
Il home."-(Copyright 1903, by c. B. Lewis