davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

The trouble with some welLmeaning
people is TINT they think religion
and loud Pr tensions OF piety synony.
NOUS. Religion Is good conduct. Love
and justlce--this is the law and the
prophets. This will be great news to
some editors.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

Uncle Sans income Is over $1,000.
900 day, which is somewhat larger
than Mr. Rockefeller's income. hut
Mr.. Rotkefeller's percentage OF profits
Is greater .han Uncle Sans. He has
less competition.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

Following his plan of commemorat-
Ing the army and navy In music. Mr..
sousa's next composition should he a
spirited symphonic poem entitled
"Uncharted Rocks"
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

n the late Mr.. Newtons theory of
sravitation is false we are at last re-
Iieved 10 know that We haven't been
Walking around like ilies on a ceiling,
ofter al. II always seemed an undig.
uiGod proceeding and we're glad To be
xet rieht--and upright.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

With the friendly help of Mr.. Rookie
feller and other welI-known citizens.
young Cornelius Vanderbilt has just
'made" sio.000Io00 In the stock mar.
ket. Who lost Il?
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

Capt. Wginge win make a first rate
American citizen. but there are three
or four available shippers between
him and the job OF sailing cup de-
fender.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

A daring Frenchman IL coming
across the Atlantic next May In an
airship. Prof. Langley will meet him
ON the banks OF the Potomac with an
automobile.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

Having ssld the first two sham
rocks. perhaps Sir Thomas Upton has
got quarter Of the money that he
will need to pay his expert doctors
bills. .'
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

When the United States army goes
up against the football players OF this
country II will meet the fate that
sooner or later comes to every cham
pion.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

Another American word. nickel"
has Joined "blftek" and ''rosbif' in the
French vocabulary. II is used In
speaking of the new French hve-cent
nickel coin.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

Now for rush OF hunters to Alas
ka! DIR. Frizell. government scientist,
reports seeing fresh mammoth tracks
up there.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

A woman who knows how TO make
good bread can lack lot of brains
and her family will never miss them.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

Stuart Robson left s3l, ,e92. mostly
in cash In the bank-which Is about
the most satisfactory possession, after
all.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

Perhaps Mrs. Peary was afraid that
after another dash for the pole there
would be no use trying to make Robert
toe the mark.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03
The Panama Canal.


Just as we expected, the Panama
canal is not dug yet. Early in the
spring we advanced q practical and
wonderfully cheap plan for accom-
plishing the work.
We felt the inward fussing OF a de-
sire for vacation working In us, and
reasoned that the same leaven was
fermenting In thousands and thou
sands of other men.
Now what we advised was to cre-
ate great furore about the fishing
in the immediate vicinity of the pro-
posed canal. attract all the fishermen
to South America and upon their ar
rival, set them to digging bait along
the canal route. The immense amount
Of labor expended every summer dig
ging worms, II corraled and crystal
iZcd, would dig the Panama canal In
one fishing season. The cost to tho
government would be really immateri-
al. and the worm hunters would Just
as soon dig In one place as another.
We outlined this plan, as above
stated. early In the spring. but for
some unknown reason the government
has not seen fit to adopt II. The re-
suit is, the bait-digging season for the
open year Is about done, and no
prospect OF getting up enthusiasm
over buried treasure Is In evidence.
Now the government will be com.
PEELED to pay out great sums OF money
to construct the waterway. but It's
good enough for Il. Hereafter when
diagnose q saving of several million
dollars to this nation, the government
will jump Mt the proposition as q ward
politician Jumps at q growler. II Is
the fate OF great thinker TO be ig-
nored for time, but sooner. or later
the biographers of this country will
invite him to buy book In which his
picture is printed. This is the history
of all great men, and we are always
willing to incite history to do her
worst.
SSS
Alas. the wintry days draw. nigh.
The time when conscience reprimnnds
Because. you spent your summer wage
for beer.
-
Hs Wins tho Medal.
Bings-"In your estimation, Wings.
what denotes strong character In
women7"
wings-"Passing through a Are
sale without buying her husband
necktIes."
Bings-"Aw. go on. somebody told
you!"
SSS
wife can't make pies like my
mother used To make. but try TO be
reasonable-I cant make the money
her father did. II ! did I could buy
pie to suit me.
wanted--A man that during his life
time has thrown . bootjack at q cat.
Also tell ss why this bootjack joke
perists In living.
The man had four treys and full
house in his imitation bible case but
even that did not keep him from fall
ing into coal hole.
- nA
An editor down In Southern Illinois
has becu 20 busy this summer ha
hasn't had time to ride out ali hts
editorial mileage. w
Pulitzer gives Ss.OO0.o00 to endow
| q college Of Journalism. Just think
what We could DO with that money.
OR
ehs was : ntes Girl but shs VI
uother - ~ w heavy kilehe&
~ - psses|| s ssps =, susv|
I. :
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

We learn by telegraph that bather
NJ Asbury Park was arrested for wear
Ing high hat into the water. II that
was all, no wonder.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03
/: Wilder's Lightning Brigade.
/: Mounted Infantry.
/: Fourth Division--Reynolds.
(: Fourteenth Corps-Thomas.

Malice Joseph J. reynolds, com.
mander OF the division. was himself
an Indiana hero. and that state has
not been laggard In commemorating
her sons. Excepting the Buckeye
state. she has the greatest number OF
monuments and markers on the field
thirty.nine OF one and seventy-six Of
the other.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

After submitting to an interview the
sultan OF TurAcy has the nasty habit
of turning the interviewer over to the
executioner.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

II Harry Lehr ever comes 20 grief
In financial way he can soon re-
establish his fallen fortunes by start
Ing man-milliner shop.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

A lack Of expert management In the
present crisis in European affairs Is
painfully evident. Where Is Core.
spondent Creelman7
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

The assets OF the s12,006.0OO Ma
tionai Salt company have been sold for
s337.000. Evidently the salt mines
were salted.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03
Slowly. and stooped to piek up he

comb. It had snapped in two.
you two are excellent nurses" Mrs.
Allen said. softly. a smile on her lips
as she motioned with her head toward
tho bed.
DR.. Dunwiddie turned at once with
n slight exclamation. and Dolores
arose with the comb in her hand. her
hair falling around her. her eyes dark
as though tears we're In them. her
lips shut close. As she turned her
eyes toward the bed she met full in
hers tho weak gaze OF her father.
Only for a moment. however, for the
eyes closed almost Immediately as
though the light hurt them. but in
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

The Turks seem determined to keep
mp the slaughter until they run out OF
Macsdonians.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

II would be great joke 10 Boston
should be Obliged to send to the Phil
ippines FOR Goldfish.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

Secretary Chamberlain was all right
until he became so we'll known that
people called him Joe"
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

Connecticut will have to whIttle its
cigars out Of something else this year.
Its tobacco crop Is a failure.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03
Horses In War.


Hardly anything can be imagined
more cruel than the treatment Of
horses in war-on the march through
the swamps and wllderness-on the
battleAelds where during the civil war
thousands were left wounded TO die
of starvation--no hospital or Red
Cross ambulance for them!
"old Captain" in "Black Beauty"
tells the story "some Of the horses
had been so badly wounded that they
could hardly move from the loss OF
blood. others were trying TO drag
themselves along on three legs. and
others wera struggling to rise on their
forefeet when their hind legs had
beer shattered by shot. Their groans
were pitcous to hear. and the beseech-
Ing look In their eyes TO those who
passed and left them TO their fate l
shall never forget."-our Dumb AMI
mails.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

Sir Thomas lost his hinnaclc. but he
wjltfa,fe his vermiform appendix back
10 England with him.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

Naturally the rural mail carriers
object to country roads out Of which
the bottoms have dropped.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

UNCLE JOSH IN TOWN.
Gee whillkens! Maria Ann. ] was most
awful fly
! seen the elephant fer fair and bucked
the tiger high.
seen II ALL Maria, dear, the whole rip
snortin' thing;
know I did. by cracky: fer sure I did.
by jingl
And now guess. by ginger. I'll 20 on
down 10 Siack's
I'm out of Cuddcr's cbewin' and fragrant
smoke terbac.
I'm goin' now. Maria. Jest lend me nifty
cents
I'll pay yc back to-morrer-1'm short by
accident.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

After all. the corn crop is able to sit
up and notice things.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03
General Black.

. Gen. Black. the new commandef-in
chief OF the q. A. r., was commission
er Of pensions during President Cleve
laad's first term and served one tern
In the national house as representa-
tive-at.isrge from the state OF Illinois
During Cleveland's second term Gen
Black was United States attorney 70
the Northern district OF Illinois. III
IL a lawyer by profession. having prae
ticed In Chicago ever since the war
Gen. Black was commander Of the de
partment of Illinois. q. A. r.. In 1895
lie has the unique distinction OF beinl
the Arst democrat 10 hold the once o
mmander-in-chief
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

wanted--A man that during his life
time has thrown . bootjack at q cat.
Also tell ss why this bootjack joke
perists In living.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03
GA

The man had four treys and full
house In his imitation bible case. but
even that did not keep him from fall
ing into coal hole.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03
eDJA

An editor down In Southern Illinois
has becn 20 busy this summer ha
hasn't had time to ride out ali his
editorial mileage.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

Pulitzer gives Ss.OOO.000 to andow
q college Of jonrnallsm. Just think
what We could DO with that money.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

wife can't make pies like my
mother used to make. but try TO be
reasonable-I can't make the money
her father did. II ] did could buy
pie to suit bie.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

Hs Wins tho Medal.
Bings-"In your estimation, Wings.
what denotes u strong character In
women7"
wings-"Passing through a Are
sale without buying her husband
necktIes."
Bings-"Aw. go on. somebody told
you!"
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1903-12-03

Alas, the wintry days draw Nigh.
When all In white and chill and drear;
The time when conscience reprimnnds
Because you spent your summer wage
for beer.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-07-14

yesterday morning by Col. R. F. Ligon. Inspector General on the staff of Governor Jelks. In his tour of inspection, Colonel Ligon was accompanied by Adjutant- Gen. eral w. w. Brandon, Captain Samuel Jones of the Limited States Army, Lieu tenant-Colonel F. P Mcconnell and stan.
 The inspection was most thorough. The quarters of the men and the officers. the company streets, the guard house. mess hall and kitchen were all thorough ly inspected. The train of inspecting of- ficers passed up and down each company street inspecting the arms and equip ment of the men as well as each company which was drawn up in line in its com pany street.
 The inspection of the regiment found its condition to be very satisfactory. The quarters are specially well kept.
 Colonel Ligon has quarters at Camp Graham with the Adjutant- General With the Adjutant-General he will keep in close touch with regimental affairs.
 The office of Inspector General on the Governors staff has heretofore been a sinecure. Colonel Ligon will however, in- spect each regiment in its practice camp.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-07-14
SUMMER EXCURSION.

The Central of Georgia Railway now has on sale at all of its coupon ticket offices, excursion tickets to Mountain and Lake Resorts in the North, East and West.
 To Eastern cities and resorts via Sa- vannah and steamship lines
 To Tybee. the most delightful seashore resort on the South Atlantic Coast.
 Quick and convenient schedules. through sleeping cal service.
 Full particulars. rates, schedules, etc. cheerfully furnished upon application to your nearest ticket agent, or F. B. White, Commercial Agent, Commerce St, Montgomery, Ala. auv-tu-thu-sun.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-07-14

company, which was commanded by Cap tain Cooper, made poor showing at camp. Only one of the commissioned off cers. a Lieutenant, came to camp, and he remained only a short while The in spection yesterday by Col. R. F. Ligon of this company was not altogether sat isfactory. The company had only about twenty men in camp. It has recently been commanded by Lieut.. William Young of Company B. who was detached for that purpose. The vacancy in the Regiment will be filled as soon as pos sible, with the mastering in of a new company.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-07-14
But the Betting Goes On.

Chicago, July 13.-Twenty constab bles were engaged for the fourth time by At torney Cantwell. acting for E. E. Far ley, the turf man ruled off at Detroit. to serve warrants on officials and bookmak- CTS at the Washington Park race track today. Only one constable was admitted to the track. He served the warrants quietly. The men arrested were Law renee Young. President of the Club; Sec retary James Howard and nine bookmak- CTS. The b1okmakers had all been ar rested in the previous raids on the track Those arrested today at once gave bond and betting went on as usual
The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-07-14
BURGLAR TOOK NOTHING.
Found No Money and Wanted No
 Millinery.

Greenvlle, July 13.-(Special "A burg lar entered the millinery store of Cook and Martin last night, but not finding any money did not disturb the goods. En- trance was made by boring number of auger holes in the rear door and taking out a panel An attempt was also made 10 enter the store of the Alabama Jew elry Company next to the millinery store. The door was double and each effort of the burglar. to bore a hole was prevented by nails, so the job was given up. A ne- gro was arrested and lodged in jail early this morning. there being strong evil dence of his being the culprt.
 O. K. Porter has accepted position at Birmingham and will leave for that city tomorrow. Greenville regrets to lose MT. Porter and his excellent family.
 Miss Nora Crenshaw and niece, little Sarah Tatum. will leave Wednesday for g visit to Battle Creek, Mich.
 Mrs. Chappell and daughter left Satur- day to visit relatives at Mobile and Jackson.
 Misses Florence Dunklin and Lola May Traweek are visiting friends at Annis- ton.
 Major T. w. Peagler and family are so1ourning at Sea Shore Camp Ground.
 Mrs. Matte Wilson has returned from a visit to relatives at Highland Park.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-07-14

they are starving" One small saloon and gambling house has closed altogeth- CT. the assertion being made by those in terested in the place that there was no profit in operating the saloon after the gambling annex vas destroyed. Several other small saloons with gambling an- nexes are on the verge of bankruptcy, and even the more pretentious establish ments are operating at loss.
 The committee has brought about this change; or, rather, it's executive officers and it's attorneys have done so. They have accomplished the task, too, in the face of many obstacles placed in their path by those who should have given them assistance. The puerile contention that Sunday tipoling and gambling could not be- suppressed has been effectually exploded and that, too. by committee of citizens clothed with no official power.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-07-14
Reforming Nashville.
Nashville American.

NdSnNlllc <lhAcIiSdil.
 The reports of the executive officers of the committee of one hundred, at its meeting on Thursday, showed what a few resolute citizens could do in a few months toward suppressing Iawlessness in this town.
 The committee has been in the field less than six months. yet vast majority of the saloons are closed on Sunday, and the great public gambling houses say
The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-07-14
SOLDIERS LEAVE TODAY:
 WERE REVIEWED YESTERDAY
Tents at Camp Graham Will Be Struck at Reveille. Review Of Troops by the GovernOr-IO
 Muster Out Company A.

Adjutant General Brandon was dsln- clined to take this action until after the practice camp had been held. It would have been impracticable to have organ ized and drilled a new command before camp
 In the meanwhile 1t was thought the company might improve and attain a standard of efficiency. The woodlawn
The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-07-14
A Correction.

I understand that the name of A. s. Knowles Dry Goods Co. has been pub lished as one of the stockholders of the proposed Citizens Light, Heat and Power Company. This publication was made during my absence from the city and was without my knowledge or consent. 1 am entirely satisfied with our contract with the Montgomery Light and Water Power Company, and have no desire to invest in the stock of any other.
 -adv. A. s. Knowles.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-07-14

This has long been regarded as one of the most dangerous and fatal diseases to which infants are subject. It can be cured. however. when properly treated All that is necessary Is to give Chamber lain's Colic. Cholera and Diarrhoea Rem edy and castor oil. as directed with each bottle. and a cure is certain. For sale by all druggists. adv
The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-07-14
Fixing the Blame.

Philadelphia Inquirer
 Caller-So the doctor brought you a lit- tie sister the other night, eh?
 Tommy-Yes: I guess 1t was the doctor done 1t. Anyway. I heard him tellin' pa some time ago at if pa didn't pay his old bill he'd make trouble fur him.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-07-14
Complexion Bad, Liver Torpid, Appetite PoorP

Horsford's Acid Phosphate clears the complexion by restoring stomach, liver and bowels. A Tonic for mental nervous or physical weakness. -adv.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-07-14
Four Consolation Trips.

The four persons residing in Ala hama standing seventh to tenth in the number of votes received in this con- test will be given, as Consolation Trips. the choice of round trip railroad tick cts to the following four great cities:
 St. Louis, Mo-, Washington, D. C., Chicago, Ill.,, Cincinnati, O.
 The one standing seventh in the number of votes received in this con- test to have the first choice, the one ranking eighth in number of votes received to have second choice, and so on to the one ranking tenth This will make a total of Ten Advertiser Free Trips Suppose youry for one.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-07-14
ForFive
@ @ @

We've taken all of our two-piece Suits where there are only one or
 
 two of kind left and put them on seperate counter to be sold at $500. They are values that range from $7.5o to $Io.oo and if you can be sized you'll be pleased.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-07-14

Mrs. Chappell and daughter left Satur day to visit relatives at Mobile anc Jackson.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-07-14

Miss Nora Crenshaw and niece, little Sarah Tatum. will leave Wednesday fol 8 visit to Battle Creek, Mich.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1903-07-14
Cholera Infantum.

Mrs. Mattie Wilson has returned iron visit to relatives at Highland Park.
The Honolulu times. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1902-1911, 1903-04-01

King Edward VII. since coming
to the throne has done nothing but
good for his people and for the
world
Every act has been that of
large-minded conscientious man.
He has indeed followed in the foot
steps of his mother, the late lament
ed Queen of ever blessed memoir.
.s.s.s
The devil is never so black as
he is painted" Humph! we are
not prepared exactly to accept that
proposition. 1t is true we have
never had much to do i'll Our lie
with his satanic majesty; but, Oh
one or two occasions we have been
privileged to see his hoofs as he
fled in the distance at our suspect
ed anathemas, and we could but
fancy (and no fancy that the
whole figure would be quite dark,
as dark as Erebus. Doubtless, you
have all heard of the man who hat.
ed the devil so much, after beating
him, (''shaming him,") that he al
ways wrote his majestys name
with small d. Ed.
The Honolulu times. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1902-1911, 1903-04-01

Southern California is about the
worst place on earth for a rheu-
matte while Hawaii, especially Ho
nolulu, is one of the best places.
The peculiar excellence of this eli
mate for the treatment of rheuna-
tic complaints ought not to be for
gotten
The pineapple is the thing fo-
the small farmer" said William
Hogs, of the Makaha Coffee Com
pany, to an Advertiser man yester-
day. Il don't know about the other
islands. but on Oahu there is field
for small farmers. And there is
more in the raising of pineapples
than anything else. There is any
quantity of land available for the
purpose, land on the highlands,
where there are no pests no bother
and where the pines ripen two
months earlier than they do any
where else. We have $4,000 plants
on Our place near Waianae, and
last year we had pineapples in o.
tober when nobody else had them
until December. A market! Well,
these fellows pretty nearly drove
us crazy to get them. No use in
talking, the pineapple is the thing
for the small farmer.
Yes; we are doing something
up there in the way of raising
lines. Five years ago we saw that
it was necessary to branch out from
the coffee business. had made
something of study of the demand
for lines and we determined to go
into that Lines are worth in San
Francisco, usually. one dollar
hundred. We can put them down
at fifty cents and make a profit,
and we can put in a green lime,
which gives the best flavor. and
so commands the highest price.