West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1903-01-01

FIRST Anniversary at Tunnel
R6kHS&S ton, December 3o.h, 1907,
SSS2S. and celebrated ihe occasion
by banquet at Hotel Wat
kins. The reporter is lacking in descriptive
power and language to do the subject Justice.
The menu was such as to satisfy the mos,
avaricious gormondizer and tickle the
palate of the most fastidious epicure. All
who partook of the feast were unanimous in
voting IL the best spread ever set before
Tunnelton people.
After satisfying the inner man, (all except
Deacon Brown, who was ten miles away
tripping the light fantastic toel, the Toast
master, Hon. S. b. Montgomery, introduced
those who were to respond to the toasts.
1t is useless to say that Major Montgomery
made an ideal POSTMASTER. lie first intro
duced Mr.. Milford c. Gibson, who re-
sponded TO sour Anniversary" To the
reporter Mr.. Gibson, as he arose, seemed
''too full for utterance." But after casting
his eyes over the fair women and knightly
Knights assembled, he responded most
eloquently and humorously which convinced
the reporter that he was at peace with the
world and the proud possessor of ~ pieces
of turkey by actual count. He was heartily
applauded and requested to ego on" but
his eagle eye having caught sight of the
remnant of the once proud and slrutling
turkey gobbler was proof positive to the
reporter that turkey was mighier than
speechmaking.
"Damon and Pyihias" was the toast
assigned Mayor John b Ford of Kngwood.
His tribute to Damon aud Pythias was both
touching and eloquent. Mr.. Ford is a
pleasant speaker and the generous applause
which he received attested his popularity
with the Function people.
sour Guests" was fittingly responded to
by Col. Chas w. Wolfe, although the re-
porter must confess that he had no doubt as
to the fact that Col Wolfe was TOO full"
TO immortalize himself as a Pyihian orator
The reporter kept careful tab on Col.
Wolfe, and il is due to history and future
anniversaries to record it that he commenced
eating at o:3o p. m, and at twelve o'clock
(midnighi) he was still eating when called
upon to respond to the toast. Justice de-
mands that the reporter must say that Mrs.
Wolfe has been absent from home for one
week and Col. Wolfe has been the victim of
cold potato salad.
"Our Obligation" was the toast which
added lus,re to the fame of Mr.. Ashford NJ /.
Moore as a postprandial orator. To say
that Mr.. Moore handled his subject seriously,
touchingly and eloquently is a waste of
words. The subject was too serious to give
vent to his humor for which he is famed.
The applause which he received was both
generous and hearty.
The Ladies" was CALAMITY and gra.
ciously handled by one OF our best young
men, MIR. James G. Gibson. The reporter
has no hesitancy in saying that Mr. Gibson
Is model young man. and his tribute to
womanhood was so beautifully and feeling
ly and touchingly delivered that the re
porter's eye could not escape the observa
ton Of the maidens OF sweet sixteen
casting sly glances at Mr.. Gibson.
Good II the Order" was responded tc
by Mr.. ]. Frank Craig in an excellent man
ner His advice to the brethren was the
! kind to inculcate and practice to make
good citizens. II vas highly appreciated
and loudly applauded.
Coal Center" a theme dear to the
hearts OF Tunneltonans. was responded tc
| by one OF our old landmarks. Mr.. Samuel
r. Guseman. lie described the growth o.
function both accurately and wildly
| Mt Gusemans heart was in his subject
| and he handled IL in such a manner as Il
elicit round after round Of applause. II,
/ pictured the future growth in glowing tcrmi
and added fuel 10 the applause
The Uninitiated Here is where th,
tug Of war" came in. The only and origi
nal Deacon Brown was down on the pro.
gram to give vent to his oratorlcal powers
and Eli Perkins procliyities. But. alas
The Deacon was gliding through the mar
waltz" IN Kingwood and Mayor Montgom
cry in his desperation called upon I'd vii
liams to respond I'd responded on on,
foot. carrying the other in a sling lie IL
nota veteran OF the Late Unpleasantness'
nor the Scandinavian war and Is no
entitled % pension I'd has been dc
/ pfiyed Of the use Of his right limb in run
ming away from the municipal contest nov
raging in Tunuclton I'd standing on on,
foot, made a heroic effort TO eclipse th'
fame Of Patrick Henry Webster and Clay
and when Victory was 10 bis grasp. his LEI
foot deserted him iu his hour Of need ant
he called loud and Economically for Bil
| Lavelle to- lasso and corrcl the ''Unini
tiated. D." But Lavclic's reply brought sad
ness and disappointment from The Assem-
bicd guests. as he shouted Justify q hae,
lost both limbs in running from tie cncmi
10 municipal war;" Williams sympathetic
heart was touched in the recollection o.
the numerous political battles in which o.,
and Lavcile had fallen side by side. and %,
inflated his lungs TO their utmost and %
his agony cried out Where Oh. where. i.
Deacon Brown Mayor Montgomery. will
sadness depicted on his face sorrowfulll
announced that the TITO Of Democrats were
not equal TO the Illuminated and tha
the speech making Tor ne evening was al
a close
Thus terminated one n the most enjoy
able and successful bsnqoets ever held ID
function Too much praise cannot b'
given the committees IN charge and Mr.
! and Mrs r ~ Williams for Us success.