The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1903-08-05
THE N.ONPAREIL MAN

shade Of any livery, feed and sale stable
or in any land office where it is consid-
cred good ethics to eXpectorate on the
floor. "They are as full as an egg" de-
clares Uncle Jim, s.of punk advice, alma
nae talk and bughouse theories I'm
sought advice is nauseating. Advice Of
any sort is as useful as two tails would
be on cat. If advice cut any ice, this
world would have been perfect five thou
sand nine hundred and ninety nine years
ago." Uncle Jim adds that one of this
class of geniuses may always be found
on the school board or in a barber shop.
1t is economy of time and nerves to give
them some dinky little office to escape
their tale of woe for three hundred and
|sixty-fve days"
Uncle Jim says they are incurable and
recommends paris green. That Is where
we part company with him. It is well
to remember that under this mask Of
assininity the true man is there, even
in the despised person Of the rag-chewer,
waiting to have all that foolishness scraped
off. They may have to die first-some Of
them-but it's bound to come.
The Minneapolis Telegram says that he
well remembers the little white house next
| to the Phoenix building where the W. G.
T. U. restaurant first sprang into being.
He says that in that pleasant spot he
used to eat three little brown buttered
IdpJaCkS IOE i've CeiltS III tllS CilSSflu
company of Bob Park, them a reporter
about town and well and favorably remem-
bered by the older push" What a flood
of memories etc., etc. Here we go remin-
| iscing again!
Bob Park in those days was a great stu
| dent of philosophy. He slept with an edi-
| ton of Hegel's "Pneumenology," or some
thing equally good, under his pillow.
carried an edition Of Rants "Critique"
in his pocket to read at spare hours, and
was in close cahoots with Fichte, Schop-
enhauer and Herman Lotze. He was sore
at Will Wright at one Of the meetings Of
| the Eternity club because that gentleman
referred to the pessimistic philosopher as
Skoop- hover. Park used to talk phil
osophy quite freely when he met co1-
genial spirit and the result was a little
gathering Of reporters and other philoso-
pliers every Saturday night in back
room in certain high class rum hole to
give Hegel and other warm boys Of that
character g. run for their intellectual
money. A stranger named Jack dropped
in one night and after listening for a few
moments he remarked in great disgust:
Don't you fellows talk about anything
but eternity
After that the meeting was known as
the Eternity club. It's sessions continued
until some of the choice spirits fell into
the error of matrimony and their places
knew them no more. There was a certain
Rhine wine, L cd1I1Ol ISillSillpcS
it's name, that went with this high confab
of soul and feast of reason to prevent too
} great a dryness. The Kentuckian in prais-
ling his favorite brand Of whisky says,
"There isn't a headache in a barrel OF
it," This Rhine wine was different. Any
body who smelled the cork carried off a
headache There was not a great deal
( of wealth represented in the Eternity
club and suspect that the blind pool we
made to get. the liquid was not large
enough to supply an expensive, headache
less variety. know I wouldn't touch the
stuff now with cane. OF how much more
value do our heads get to us as we pro-
gress in years and wisdom!
The last any Of US heard from Bob Park
: he was in Denver-or was 1t Detroit
Somebody brought back the scandal that
, he was married and had an Inside posi-
: ton on the paper. 1t would be interest
2 ing to know if he has thrown down his
3 old friend Hegel.