Evening journal., 1903-09-12

youth with the large scarf pin.
YES" was the answer Somebody
done toll him dat marriage was a lot
terry. an he's such a spoht dat he's
boun' to take a chance. denver News.
Did He Keep ONT
Madam" asked the polite stranger.
''is the smell of smoke disagreeable to
youw
Il don't know" madam replied. mo
gentleman ever has smoked in my
presence. philadelphia Ledger.
An Optical Illusion.
This Is the ten dollar bill we owe.
Too small to make us fume or fuss:
But this is the same size bill that Jones
For months and months has owed to us;
x
~-Cincinnati Commercial Tribune.
Taken at His Word.
"Mr. Grun,' began the caller. II
don't want to disturb you
Very considerate of you to come in
here just TO tell me that" said the busy
merchant. Il appreciate it, sir. Good
Philadelphia Press.
The Cause.
"what made her faint2" asked the
sympathetic old lady.
Madam" replied the sour faced
misogynist. 'there was a good looking
young man standing right behind her"
New York Herald.
That Happy Time.
A thousand autos chug like mad
About our big and swiftly growing
One man In each four hundred has the fad;
III have It, too. when prices tumble
down.
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
sympathy.
sYou know Miss GoldenT
''Yes; the rich girr'-
"The same. She's engaged to Jack
Cadley"
Yes? The poor girl."-Philadelphia
Public Ledger.
He Obliged Him.
'sYour fine is heavy" said the pris-
oner to the judge. Cant you give me
a little timer
Certainly" was the reply-"thirty
daysw-Atlanta Constitution.
Another Scarcity.
~
Where's the parade that stirred the town.
Oh. life is cruel and unjustl
They've organized circus trust.
--Washington Star
II Has been Done.
"Still, OF course" said the tobacconisi
to the wooden Indian, ut is possible
sometimes to make a good round sum
put OF a perfectly square deaL"-,Syra-
cuse Herald.
Not Tangible.
II money talks / guess
Its talk to me
is done by wireless
Telegraphy.
philadelphia Ledger.
Improvement.
-The owner OF our fat is contem-
plating a great improvement"
"That so?"
''Yes. He's going to discharge the
janitor. r."-Cincinnat Enquirer.
a sad, short story
To bet on the market
He thought IL a joke.
He went TO a broker.
And now he is broke
Washington Star.
Uncle Allen.
"When a man Is just aching to do
something mighty mean and is afraid
to do it." said Uncle Allen Sparks. ''he
always says he'd do II for cents"-
Chicago Tribune.
To Get n Seat.
To circumvent poor weary men
A woman uses tact"
That word describes her conduct when
The trolley car Is packed.
philadelphia Press.
The Letter That Counts.
Ted-What large blue eyes Mabel
has
Ned-Yes. hut they can't compare
with Helen's long green X's.-New
York Times.
Undoubtedly.
The wabbling OF some meu reminds me.
After they have had a swallow.
That their footsteps suufT would be
Somewhat difficult to Follow.
Cincinnati Enquirer.
As to the Prima Donna.
"Rather uncertain in her high notes.
think"
"Why. yes. She strikes some and ap-
proximates the Others" = New York
Times.
The CoIors Change.
Oh. ye who'd nightly paint the town,
Take warningi
A taste for red begets dark brown
Next morning.
Brooklyn Citizen
Her Meaning.
Angry Father-What do you mean by
being engaged to half dozen men at
oncef'
She-Nothing.- Free Press.
A Song OF the Sea.
He never bought gold brick
Nor tried the bunko game
but he played at steamship poker.