The Savannah morning news., 1903-09-14
One WAY to Joke.

Young Algernon is prepossesslns
young man; he is also a scientist, and
well knows how to make a practical
joke occasionally aid his researches in
science, says the Brooklyn Eagle. For
some time he had been engaged in
study of the powers of gun cotton, and
one night he resolved to make few
experiments. The Dersonification of a
quiet, unassuming young dude he was
as he sauntered into the office of the
only hotel in his native city; but un-
derneath the gay exterior there lurk-
ed a fierce determination to aid the
cause of science, even if his friends
had to suffer. With a smiling face he
approached an old friend, shook him
by the hand and engaged him in con-
versation. In the course of the de-
bate, AlgeInon grew excited, and to
emphasize his remarks he placed one
hand upon his companions shoulder.
1t was a simple movement enough
enc sees similar action every day. But
little white ball is felt when he
takes his hand away. Again the hand
goes to the shoulder, and this time it
is accompanied by a lighted cigarette.
The cigarette touches the little white
ball and-puff! flames shoots up past
the companions ear.
Great Scott cried that astonish-
ed individual, as he staggered against
the wall, and glanced fearfully
around.
LAS 1 was saying" said Algernon
innocently, the"
Hang what you were usaying!" ex-
claimed the other. Where in thunder
did that fire come FROM"
What fire?" inquired Algernon
sweetly.
What fire? Why, that sheet of
flame that scorched my ear"
Algernon looked grieved.
Il thought, George. that you had
quit drinking" he said, reproachfully.
Il have; but, by the great horn
spoon, 1 begin to think that had bet
tr go at it again. 1 never was troubled
with fire on the ear when l was drink
ing
I'm sorry for you, George" said
Algernon, giving his companion a pity
ing glance. NO doubt you believe
what you say, but when man sees
flames and all that sort of thing, very
little faith can be placed in his asser-
ton of temperance"
See here, you section of a grave
yard slab" and George grew vehe-
ment, II don't want YOU to throw out
any lilSllludL1OllS against lie, OT ny
the holy hump of the sacred camel I'll
show you some flames interspersed
with stars"
Very well, George. Well drop the
subject. But hope that you will have
no more trouble of this kind. 1t makes
me really sad"
They went back to their former
topic of conversation and were soon
completely engrossed in it again. al
though for a time Georges gaze kept
rowing nerVously about. AS soon as
he was quoted sufficiently, Algernon
went through the same pantomime as
before. Again the little fame grazed
Georges ear, and again the wall was
called on to furnish support.
well, you saw it that time, didn't
your" he exclaimed as soon as he had
so far recovered himself that his heart
did not beat more than 14O times a
minute.
WHAT" queried Algernon in sur
prise.
why, the flame"
AIgernon heaved a sorrowfuI sigh,
and returned:
Take my arm, George. and steady
yourself on that"
What for?" asked George.
Never mind" said Algernon in a
determined voice; Just take it, DIR.
Bones is friend of mine, and he'll
fix you up and keep dark about it,
too
"Holy justice of the peace!" cried
George, breaking away in a towering
passion, whats bothering your
You are, George, I'm sorry, but it's
so. Come! Don't make such a fuss
in this public place or every one will
notice your condition"
For moment or two it looked as
though blood would be spilled, but the
danger was happily averted.
George had grown suspicious
though, and he resolved, whatever
happened, to exhibit no surprise this
time. IN short time the flame
again shot up. George turned death
ly pale, but he managed to laugh in a
feeble way.
Would y-you mind-a-letting mime
see your cigarettes he asked, eye
ing that article closely.
Certainly not. Won't you have
one?"
mo sir-ree!" he exclaimed emphat-
ically: 81 want to live"
ly, and then handed it back with the
remark:
"One of the prettiest cigarettes I
ever saw. How does it work."
Just like any other. But, George,
you're trembling
Eyes. I'm not feeling very well, l
guess I'll go home" And he went,
glancing fearfully over his shoulder all
the way, while Algernon left to stow
away the balance of his gun-cotton