The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1903-06-13
THE UNDo1NG OF KENNEDY.


THE UND0ING OF KENNEDY.
$50 your wife doesn't give yor
credit for any great amount of per-
sonal bravery, eh ~ asked Clarkson,
as he and Kennedy were riding home
on West Side electric.
mo" returned Kennedy, doleful-
ly, "she appears to consider me a
trife shy on pluck. Now if she were
one of the women who go on to a
chair when mice are mentioned,
could get back at her, but unfortu-
nately she's perfectly Indifferent to
mice.
Suggests, suppose, said Clark
son, "that you would be found under
the bed if burglar should get into
the house?"
"Not quite SO bad as that" cor
rected his companion, hastily. "That
is, she has never intimated in words
that a burglar would have to look for
me there if he were to call on urgent
business. What 1 meant was that
Mrs. Kennedy has never appeared
impressed when 1 have told of some
daring feat accomplished before we
were married. There is a cold, un-
responsive look in her eyes on such
occasions that makes one want to do
something perfectly thrilling-pro-
vided it could be done with safety, 1
mean"
"I see," said Clarkson, apprecia-
ting the point. ''You would like to
do little hero business, but you
don't want to take any chances. Wise
head Now, let's see what oppor-
tunities there are for safe investment
to set fire to your house in order to
carry Mrs. Kennedy out in safety,
for the house might burn down. If
it didn't burn to the ground, the fire
department would fill it full of dirty
water, SO the result would be the
same. The water in the harbor is
too cold at this season of the year for
any aquatic accommodating. I think
your best plan would be a carefully
arranged burglar scene in your own
kitchen. Let me see"-here Clark
son stroked his beard thoughtfully.
eyes, could help you out very
nicely"
"Divulge your plan !" cried Ken
nedy, in a stage whisper. His COM
panion sat buried in thought for a
moment. Then he slapped his knee,
joyously.
II have it, p he cried. "The plan
unfolds itself before mine eyes like a
panorama. Now listen. I get through
my work at the Morning Journal Of
fee at little after midnight. That
brings me up on the West Side little
before one o'clock. On the night we
select, you must leave your kitchen
windows unfastened when you go to
bed. As 1 pass along your street, ]
will burglariously enter your base
ment."
"And l." said Kennedy, hearing
your stealthy movements below stairs,
will arouse my wife and bid her moi
to be alarmed, while. go to grapple
with the burglar hear in the kitch.
en-"
Exactly" said Clarkson. "You
will come boldly down stairs and
grapple with me. We will make
noise enough to give the effect of q
terrific struggle. Have you a re-
vo1ver?"
"Yes," replied Kennedy, "but il
has never been loaded. I-Pm afraic
I shouldn't know how to fire it off p
"Never mind" rejoined Cla1kson
"Get some blank cartridges, and hant
it to me when you come down stairs
I'll fire it off two or three times for yol
before making my escape through
the window. If you can drip little
red paint along the floor and over the
window sill, it will heighten the eff
feet and add to your glory"
Good !" chuckled Kennedy, cpl
get the very shade of paint-or, bet.
ter still, I'll have fresh, uncookeC
beefsteak in the refrigerator tha
night, and drip the juice along til,
floor and over the window sill. Tha
will be real art !''
"Capital, said Clarkson, "ant
don't forget to have lot of your sill
verware gathered in heap on th
kitchen table-the silver, you know
that the burglar was just about t.
bag when surprised by its fearles
owner. ,"
Leave that to me-" interrupte'
the other, blithely. "I'll have al
the stage effects arranged in tn
most artistic style. I'll even have il
my hand a piece of the burglars Goa
when Mrs. Kennedy first beholds m
after the encounter. I know wher
now reposeth a coat of my bachelo
days, from whose back l can tear
strip of goodly size. Oh, this is great
Clarkson, you are my deliverer fror
the curse of inappreciation HOY
shall I ever repay you?"
"Oh, I'll get my pay all right,
chuckled Clarkson. "You forge
that 1 shall have the privilege of wri
ting up the story of your unexample
bravery for the Morning journal -
IA AIf