Waterbury evening Democrat., 1903-06-04

ms chaw or terDacker flew Orlten hlS mouth like cork outen sody water bottle, and hit Nose plumb in the eye, when he squatted on the mack ral kit, and stopped his grin quicker than it had started. Simon he rig up offen the roll O calico, lookin' madder'n wet hen, and hollers out to the feller, who was scramblin' to git up:
 "'That's right!' he hollers. That's all keep store for, jest for folks to come in an jump on things and smash 'em! Shall I git you an ax?' he hol- lers.
 "The feller got up, and first along T thought he was goin' to pitch in and give us all a rough-and-tumble, but he compromised it by sayin' to Simon, ugly as a bear:
 "'I come in here to git five cents worth O loose chewin',' says he. If you'll jest dish it up I'll git out ag'in, there none too soon!' says he, stickin' up his nose high ag'in the Knob coun- try. While Simon went potterin' after the loose chewin', says:
 "'Yes,' says. I guess I forgot to mention that Ebenezer was 8 mule, And slick one he was, too. Old Joe rig him.
 He was comin' eight year old when Old Joe sentenced him to go down in Jersey, and I'll bet his ears was foot and a half long. His tail wasn't as long as his ears,' says, but it had g. tuft onto it like cannon swab.
 'Ebenezer was fat as buttermilk calf, but he wasn't reliable. He'd kick and bite and fight, whenever the sper- Tit moved him, and the sperrit was movin' him most O the time.
 "'Ebenezer sort O got the idee in his head that he was goin' where he'd mebbe have wider field to let his cussedness loose in, and he went trip pin the 16 miles to the railroad like a lamb frolickin' and went into thecar a hee-hawin' as though he'd bust his wizzen, he was so tick1ed over the prospects. I think they said it was somethin' like 200 miles Ebenezer had to ride fore he got there, but when they unloaded him down there in Jer- sey he come out smihn'.
 "'He thought he jest had it in for that country and was goin' to make his mark. But he hadn't looked around him much, so Shorty said, before he begun to git way down in the dumps.
 "'Shorty hadn't never see Ebenezer that way and he got skeert. And when Ebenezer went to the blow without a word, and yanked it all day without once liftin' his ears or them heels O his'n, Shorty made up his mind that Ebenezer was playin' it on him, and he said he'd be willin' to bet that farm ag'in the roe of a shad that hadn't ben ketched yit that there was an arthquake workin' in that mule, and that when it busted it'd dlift Shorty clean to t other side O Jordan!
 "'But it want so, stranger says I to the sour-lookin' feHer who was feedin' hisself loose chewin' like COW eatin' hay. Tt want so strange. Ebenezer got down in the dumps worse and worse every day and after he had been in Jersey week Shorty went to the field after him one day and there was no mule to be seen.
 "'Shorty hunted all over that coun- try for three days, but couldn't find no trace of Ebenezer. Then he sent word back to old Joe that the mule had gone off somewheres and died. Old Joe was glad to hear it.
 'Somethin' like two weeks after gittin' that word, old Joe was reused out of his sleep, along about three o'clock in the mornin', by noise that sounded consarned familiar. It rat tied the windows. It echoed among the hills. It walled, it yooped, it hee- hawe6.
 "Ebenezer, by the gander gosin' O Wild Goose creek!" old Joe hollers, iumpin' out O bed and runnin' to the door.
 GA mule was leaning ag'in the front fence, jest about on his last pins. He was thin and scraggly, his eyes was holler, and his ears hung clean to his knees, like a yeller hounds.
 "'When this mule see old Joe he lifted up his voice ag'in and actu'ly wept. It was Ebenezer, sure enough. Ebenezer back from Jersey.
 "'It's somethin' like 300 miles by TOdu WACIC EUChSACT WdS LO IuS Knob country, and so old Joe couldn't help but fgger out what Ebenezer's idee O Jersey must "a been to take his overburdened heart with him, as it were, and pull out for the distant Knob country on hoof.
 "'Ebenezer was as slick as ever in a week after he got back, and started right in to be as sassy and cussed as ever, and to run the place as he had done before, but one day old Joe says to his wife, when Ebenezer was by, gittin' ready to boss the doin's for the day:
 "" Mandy" says he, "I'm goin' to send. Ebenezer back to Jersey ag'in," says he.
 "'Ebenezer dropped his ears to wunst and walked away, and ever sence then he's been the best mule that ever made music in the hull Knob coun- try, and old Joe wouldn't take $500 for him.
 "'So, says to the sour-lookin' fel-