The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-08-27

Day outside IS sizzling hot,
No breeze goes tor you,
Cooling drinks for you are not
Worst thing you can do
Is sitting where the wind may hit
You and cool You off.
If Il s hot you must bear Il,
Must Just blow and cough
Saddest story ever told
In stately prose or rhyme.
is this one OF beastly cold
In the summer time.
We must admit that Sir Thomas is
beginning to cut close and stands
show to win that cup If ne viii eN-
pend a few more millions.
Meanwhile, don't forget that we claim
our tea is superior to al other makes
combined.
Nevertheless. no charges Of applying
the water cure TO the men under him
have been made against that German
sergeant who is being courtmartiaied
for cruelty.
Those colored rioters at Batavia, ILL.,
missed the chance of their lives when
they failed TO lynch the town marshal
who arrested one of their number
Should Andrew Carnegie be present
ed TO the Kaiser il is an even bet that
the library of the German emperor VIII
be enriched soon thereafter by several
interesting volumes, that evidently be-
ing the canny ones only means OF
showing pleasure.
Unlike most great CONGREGATIONS, the
big fire in Havana the other night
probably saved scores of lives. II was
a cigarette factory that burned
rr +,,+ y,I +oan, of ours ever nc
HAYES like it did Tuesday we are like
~ TO forget all the good things that
have been said for it,
With all this Macedonian trouble,
yacht racing, etc, poor Mr.. Machen mas
about passed from mind.
Few, If indeed. any. Of US will live
to see the one-minute trotter.
The failure of the union to induce
Chicago cooks and walters to strike
may be taken as an indication that
the hot weather is about over and that
sleeping out nights will soon cease to
be luxury.
should General Miles come out
strong for good roads and also con-
denim race suicide he would be hard
4 to catch.
| Now that Schwab has lost his job
| the steel trust magnates are mean
| enough to come out with a statement
/ to the effect that ne only got a mis-
! cradle 100000 a year in the way OF
4 salary.
Seriously, though, wouldn't the state
of Minnesota rather have the $4,000
! defaulted bail than have Ames?
It may be that General Miles has hit
upon a policy that viii make him many
| friends by steadily refusing to discuss
politics.
Utah lake Will be at the mercy o
any conner now that the natiOna
guard encampment has broken up.
No doubt the billboard proprietor
think the police an impudent set o
fellows for daring TO suggest that th'
| law should be complied with
Just because a man pays five or si'
( assessments on a. piece of minini
! stock it is no cinch that he has fait
in the future of the property. He ma.
be only hoping it will go up sometim
and give him a chance to get out.
] A
riage brokers to make easy the suit
of foreign titled men TO wealthy yOunl
| American women is a good one. ]
| saves so much trouble. The idea Nigh
be carried further and an heiress eX
change might be opened at some con
venient point on the continent, wher
the latest quotations. on American girl
with full prospectuses, guarantees, etc
would be readily available.
Should the Jews accept the offer of
| tract of land from the British govern
meEt in Africa there can be no dOub
but that the Russian Jews viii fin
the change from Russians to canni
balls as neighbors most agreeable.
Even should it be true, as the let
ters received here show, that Nj
Hodge is a bold, bad man who ma
IiEned his wife, that will scarcely serv
to acquit Mrs. Hodge. She is unde
arrest for killing Ryan.
Many actors will no doubt vigorousl
fight the proposition to install steel tie
on the railroads. Steel is much les
hot weather.
It is a reasonable supposition thu
one who denOunces carriage riding o
Sunday does not own any stock in
livery stable.
Why not have professional witnesse
as well as professional Jurors2 Ths
would make 1t a cinch.
l When people read that two youn
hoodIums were painfully injured in q
early morning fight on Commerce;
street there is little sympathy waste
r but some people inquire how il come
that boys are permitted to frequer
. that street.