The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1903-06-02
WELL DONE ROAST FOR STATE
SUPERINTENDENT.
SOME p0SlnS IN MS. OK
Colonel Gordon Pays His Compliments
to Exponent Of "Hieher
Education" Fad.

Even temporary. residence at FIel-
ena seems to be sufficient to %inoculate
the sojourner with that wonderful de-
gree of intellectually and erudition
that are characteristic of the perma-
nent residents of OF the states men
tai and social hub and exalt them
above the rest of the people OF Mon
tana as are the denizens of Boston
| exalted above the remainder of the
nation. Evidence of this is afforded
! in the person of the state superinten-
dent of public instruction. Before he
! went there Mr.. WEIGH never gave
any proof of abnormal mental devel-
opment, and while he may have been
regarded as the possessOr of a fair
degree of mental accomplishments he
was never suspected of being capable
Of anything like the list of questions
he has caused to be sent to the teach
ers of the public schools of the state
for use in the annual examination
OF pupils and which has subjected
him to the following bit of sarcasm
at the pen of the accomplished Col
onel Gordon of the Yellowstone Jour-
nal: @4 &
The pupils of the public schools are
undergoing their final examinations
for the year and school will close in
HI;c 1sfxy T,,pa e ar DnrcNnS Uhn have
children in the schools are naturally
interested in the markings the chill
dren obtain. The questions are pre-
pared by the state superintendent,
and in most branches the teachers
here regard them as. in some measure
adapted to the capacity of the children
but in some cases they look as ii the
author was aiming to kill a mouse
with a canon ball, and We are forced
to conclude that not only mai but
some of his productions arc fearfully
and wonderfully made. Take for in
stance history. Here are some nice
right hand swings to hand out to a IL
or 13 year old boy or girl of the
eighth grade.
Number Name four important
inventions or discoveries which closed
the middle ages and show how each
of them affected the undertaking OF
Columbus"
Gee Whiz! What a delivery. What
s. 49,. IL III . g Lo,,:rr o,> ipchoof
like that pat you in the small of the
back and your feet froze fast so as
you couldn't get away from it. We
used up about a tank of Oil last night
trying to find some evidence that Co
lunbus had ever been in the under
taking business, but couldn't find even
a picture of him riding on the seat OF
a hearse beside the driver. And as
for the "inventions that affected his
undertaking. business we never learn
| ed whether it was embalming, crema-
| ton, the hack drivers union or the
| drop in silver, that drove him to an
/ early grave. The only thing We are
| sure of in the patent line about the
| time of Columbus is that he invented
| the way to make the egg stand. we
believe this because we occasionally
run across an egg that bears internal
evidence of having descended from
the middle or even wors ages.
Then there is number 2-"Give the
| results of Coronado's adventures
We would willingly give our share OF
| the results-shell out the plumber, as
it were, of Coronado's adventures
| and even hand over old Cory himself
il we could place him-if we could
| recollect who in thunder he was or
where we met him, but he eludes us.
| Now in regards to gentlemen OF re-
cent prominence we might say, the
late Dan McGinty. Esq.-Died as a
horrible example of the effects OF over
indulgence in water, or Harry Tracey,
| Nobly surrendered his life in a wheat
field to avoid creating a feud among
relic hunters for pieces or rope. But
at this distance we can't say whether
Cory played first base under Cortez or
was a first sergeant under Pizarro.
We have consulted the World AL
manac, Spa1ding's official guide and
the Scriptures and we cant find that
! he ever had a ring record, a high bat
ting average or run his sword through
the necks of a thousand Philistines
at one thrust. Some day when the
| press breaks down and there is no
ball game, we will resort to the Car
negie library and consult the army
register or the works on agriculture