Evening star., 1903-09-26
THE AMATEUR COOK

when woke up one damp morning last
week." said q very young married woman
June bride of this year, was so rheu-
matte that could scarcely novel am oc-
casionally afflicted in that way. / told JACK
that would be unable to get up. and that
the servant would get his breakfast for him
when she came. But she didn't come-not
till near the middle of the day, when she
had some very elaborate story about hav-
ing been obliged to attend her aunts fu-
neral When the servant was half an hour
overdue I suggested to Jack that he'd bet
ter get his breakfast down town, and that
I didn't care for any.
Not much,. said Jack sympathetically
Downtown breakfasts don't make any
kind of hit with me any more. Home
stuff for mine. Anyhow. that yarn OF yours
about not wanting any breakfast Is TOO
thin: You're as hungry as a wolf. ! can
see 1t In your eyes. >TH get the break1ass
myself
" But. jack I expostulated. you can't
cook. you know, and
Cant. hey? he interrupted That's all
cook years ago. The fellows wouldn't eat
anybody else's cooking but mine when we
camped out. Whatchoo got in the refrig-
orator to cookr
"'Well.' said, 'there'c bacon and eggs.
and"
What more do you wantr broke in
Jack cheerfully. And I'll fix some toast
and make some coffee-guess bacon and
breakfast grub for anybody
Then he put on one Of my aprons and
went out into the kitchen to get breakfast.
l started to call out directions to him from
bed as to how he should go about the get
ting of the breakfast, but he wouldn't have
any directions. Told me there wouldn't be
any glory in his getting the breakfast If he
was instructed as to every hands turn.
Just you keep STILL now. and waitll
you see.' he said to me. TIM running the
culinary plant Of this outfit for the present,
and II don't show you a breakfast as is a
breakfast-well, you won't need to sign me
for next season, that's ALL
so l kept still, but 1t was hard. The
turmoil out In the kitchen was somethinf
dreadful. The doors Of the gas range were
slam-banging, kitchen tins were clattering
to the floor with frightful noises all Of the
sink spiggots seemed to be running at once.
the bread box seemed to be making busi
ness OF falling down with a horrible sound
like stage thunder. the refrigerator lid ap-
peared to be dropping with a terrible thud
every half minute. and the racket was gen.
orally SO awful that was in momentary
Ing on the door and ordering us to vacate
the nat. Then the whole fiat began to fill
with smoke-I knew the cause later in the
day. when l found In the scrap bucket six
to burn to cinders in the gas range After
about three-Quarters of an hour Of the ter
r1f1c din Jack his face all smudged I'D and
with Crime and SCOT all over him. appeared.
triumphant, bearing my breakfast on a
tray The bacon was black around the edges
the eggs. sharing the color of the cindery
bacon. were blackened, too; the toast was
oiack i at one end and not done at all at the
oiner. ana the conee was dismalIy weak
and full of grounds. But the poor boy had
done his mtghtiest, and when he stood there
Dy the ped. an expression of conscious pride
on ms 1ace. couldn't do else but praise his
oreak1ast. and tell him that it was the
taStlest had eaten in years. And the poor
1eiioW was so delighted over this praise
tnat ne stood right there. forgetting to eat
himself and watching me eat the brea kfa Of
ne had fixed up himself-eyery mouthfuI Of
tt can taste that cindery bacon vet!
men. "nen was through eating, he sat
GOWN ana ate his own breakfast. and before
he started for the office he advised mo to
try to get my coffee, hereafter like his-he
was always considered immense at making
coffee. he said.
"A little while before the servant came. 1
got up and went out to the kitchen To Iook
things over-I am bound to admit that
was niied with dread forebodings. They
were all realized. had to sit down IN the
ktchen Hoor and laugh. I couldn't begin
forSs Soune now many dishes and knives ana
torKs ana spoons and other tableware Jack
nao mussed up in getting that breakfast.
Ihey were all lying around in scattered
4eaps. But the refrigerator was the worst
Couldn't have believed that ANYBODY couId
nave got refrigerator in such shape The
grapes, that had been reposing quietly on a
dish. were buried in the paper boy OF lard
vegetable dish. filed with cooked peas
had been dumped on the fresh pound pat Of
oulter. "A cantaloupe had fallen into the
pdsteDoard box of eggs and the broken
eggs were trickling toward the water vent
IL was the most ingenious imitation of a
oomesuc Peiee that had ever seen. thar
refrigerator, and when the servant f1naIIv
cams we spent about two hours In straight
ehing out the effects Of the eruption.
JACK sun wore that proud look when he
came nome that evening. and asked me how
that breakfast Of his had set Or cnurso
Gently. iiasiii-
Why. can just taste it yet. said en-
thuslastically-and 1 certainly was te,,tne
the truth then. ""s 'eiiihs
ana, say lookee here said Jack. with
foyaI generosity to me, then, whenever YOU
uol @ ieei Just right in the morning Won
nlto"' h ana the girl doesn't get here on time.
why, all you've go to do is inst to tslI NO
and III get the breakfast for VouNsnre ,,re
tnlng Will. 1 like it-just as lief get the
BREAKFAST as not any old time that yor
want me to- Needn't be afraid to .sL 80
TO when you don't feel Just on edge and tt'II
TICKLE me foolish to help you OUT -
told him that I'd ask him tho nav.
tilne 1eit badly In the morning. But am
gong TO take particular pains not to feaI
o. uauiy IN % Ihe morning any more The after
hrao1,x a.h io1iowlng Jacks preparation of a
wasteful." hol 10 say
Drinking and Smoking.