The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1903-09-27
FUN OF THE WORLD.


A lady from Alexandria. Va visiting in Phiisdephia
quite recently anecdote Of her retiring COOK
which is good enough to be told again;
Myra the eoored cook gave notice 10 Mrs- fSena'o-
son of her intention leave at the end OF the week
r. Highly priced the cooks abilities In ,ne eu,na.y
line and proceeded interview her In an encrt TO arn
the reason for her departure following converse
ton ensued:
home give you?
Yes Mis- Richardson. allus Din HAPPY WV you an
We'll why you leave?
Say. Mis- Richardson. don't YOU all member dat
funl in de next block las Friday?
Yes. but what of that.
wen. done gwine tell all de whole trufe
Use gwine &c marry husband ob de CORPSE he low
as was de OBJ de funL
sg sS
vovnS American once found himself in English
country house relates the London Mail He was not
bad young fellow carried the habit Of selfsioIi
hcation beyond possible point that ne got himself
s;s,ikaa ana ordinary men said that rcmancer
son of the house aside and spoke to him deli
cately upon the subject.
wal" the American said would hurt to Of
eud any your nsular preudces but the fact when
| commence to blum my sorter runs away With
me. I'd take il kindly If you'd give me nudge. or
kick something when think I'm spreading IL too
thick"
The the house said he would That night the
American took an English into dinner. and she
happened refer to Conservatives IL started the
American.
house that was thought remarkable. Il g3 feet
nns. 80 high" Here his shins were oarked under
the table OF the house caught his eye He
rubbed and added with sigh And about an
inch wide"
Exgx
Appearances make towards si. declares the Lon
don "A lady, shopping In the stores. mad
vertenty picked UP another ladys umbrella from the
counter had the mistake pointed rather fgid
y and course returned the umbrella with apologies
She then remembered that she had no umbrella with
ALL it, of had begun to rain again
by and bought for herself as wen
az one for a birthday present 20 one else With
the umbrellas her hand she hailed omnibus In
Victoria and. luck would have 1t, sat down
opposite to the whose umbrella she had mad
vertently picked up The coincidence too much for
other lady Il congratulate on your very sue
eessfu morning she said sarcasticay. she swept
out omnibus. Innocence should have asserted
itself; but didn't the rshtfu of the two
umbrellas found herself speeches. and ashamed.
&c < Tz
The German Emperor has made most interesting
historic presentation Hohsnzolern Museum
the Taller II consists of the famous dice" by
help which of Kaiser wilhelm's ancestors de-
cded difficult the middle Of the seventeenth
century A beautiful young girl had been murdered
and suspicion fell soldiers Ralph and Alfred
who were rival suors hand As both prisoners
their guilt and torture failed TO extract
confession from either. Prince Frederick William. the
ancestor decided to the Gordian knot with
the dice box The soldiers should throw for their
lives. the be executed the murderer. The
event was celebrated with great pomp and solemnity
and Prince himself assisted at this appeal to Divine
intervention 1t considered by everybody includ
ing accused themselves.
Ralph given the first throw and threw SKIES. the
highest possible number and doubt felt jubiant The
dice then given to Alfred who fell on MS knees
and prayed aloud: Almighty God, Thou knowest /
beseech Thee Rising to his feet
with that of them broke
in The unbroken showed six. the broken one
also showed portion and the biz that
had split off showed giving total Of thirteen
than the throw OF Ralph. The whole audi
thrilled with establishment while the Prince ex
claimed. spokeni' Ralph. regarding the mir
acle sign heaven. confessed his guilt and
sentenced death probable that Alfred after
did not number himself among those who look upon
thirteen unlucky number
Ek x EE
This is from an old copy of an English provincial
nal:
"wanted-for a sober family. Of light weight
the Lord and drive pair of horses. He
must occasionally wait table, join the household
prayers after the horses and read chapter OF tho
Bible. He must. God willing arise at O'Clock in the
morning and obey his master and mistress In all lawful
commands. If he dress hair. sing at psalms and
play cribbage the agreeable
4g sE
Among the characters that frequent the downtown
business sections city better known than
tall quaint figure who travels from Office to ONCE
with basket OF cstnip relates New York Evening
The pet cat fixture with many business peo-
pie catnp has his regular customers whom
ordinary market basket The Office boys know when he
is expected to make his rounds. and many prank 10
played expense The street urchns have also be
come acquainted with his and. recent occa-
sion seeing him approaching stole from behind and
dropped a in his basket Catnip man. basket
and boys soon in mix-up: and this peddler viii
keep eye for mischievous boys In the future
xxE FG
II have often wondered" said the visiting Englishman
that people patriotic and musical as yours has no
national hymn
NO national hymn" exclaimed the native What 60
YOU call America
The words are good enough. but the tune. every
body knows is ours.
well how about the Star Spangied Banner
Same objection. know OF course. that the music
of the Star spangled Banner Is that of old English
drinking song been in England for nearly
two hundred years You haven't any national song
don't you know which the words and music are both
American
o. yes replied native his face Frightening as ths
brass band distance broke loose again We have
one. That's IT.
The brass band was playing "Hiswaha" according %
the Chicago Tribune
Es Il z y
Atlantic City has a number 81 hsfeis given over 70
stass and ore Of displays the foIlosns signs;
An -. f.~~ - nth