davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1903-11-05
Soldiers Monument Dedicated.

The Preston county soldiers mon
ument was dedicated in the court
house square at Kingwood Saturday
in the presence of 5000 persons. A
parade took place Saturday morning
in which the Grand Amy posts and
veterans of the civil war, veterans of
the Spanish-American war, members
of the First Regiment of West Vir-
ginia National Guard, the cadets of
the West Virginia University and
civic societies, with many bands of
music, took part. The addresses were
delivered by Congressman John Dali
zell, of Pittsburg, and Attorney-Gen-
eral Romeo H. Freer, of West Vir-
ginia. The town was deliberately
decorated.
Low Rates West and Northwest.
Via Chicago, Milwaukee g. st. Paul
Railway, every day until November
30, 1903
$33, Chicago to San Francisco, Los
Angeles, Portland, Tacoma, Seattle
and many other Pacific Coast points.
$50 Chicago to Salt Lake City, Ogden,
Grand Junction and many other
points in Utah, Colorado and Wyom-
ing. Low rates to hundreds of other
points.
Through train service, Chicago to
San Francisco. Only So for double
berth, tourist sleeper, all the way.
To the Northwest via st. Paul or
via Omaha. Write to-day for folder
John R. Pott, Room D, Park Bldg,
Pittsburgh, Pa.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1903-11-05
Bears Them Well.

Hon. Samuel A. Kendall, of Meyers
dale, lumber dealer, newspaper pub.
Usher, politician and postmaster at
Kendall, Md, was in town last even.
ing. Though somewhat loaded down
with all these dignities, he bears them
modestly.-ConneIlsYille Courier
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1903-11-05
RATES OF SUBSCRIPTION:
REMITTANCES;

Semittances made by money order, bank
draft, registered letter or express order will
be at our risk if made otherwise, at the risk
OF the sender. Address
THE REPUBLICAN,
Oakland, Md.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26
Testing the Sermon.

The minister of a parish in a part
of New England where doctrinal
points are considered of great impor-
tancc says that his test of a salts
factory sermon is the opposite Of
that which is commonly applied.
"My clerical friends in the city tell
me that so long as their congrega-
tions appear wide-awake and inter-
ested they feel encouraged" he said
to a visitor, but with me it's differ
cnt.
"Of course ! wish to interest the
congregation, but if / look over to
Deacon Drews pew, and then to
Deacon Shows, and see them with
their eyes closed and heads nodding,
| feel that all is well. Just as surely
as / discover them wide-awake and
alert after I've been preaching for
ten minutes, l know that there's
something wrong, to their minds, and
that | shall hear what it is as soon
as the service is over."-Youth's Com
panion.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26

An uptown woman recently went
with some friends to Cape May by
water, and became interested in the
picturesque attire of the weather
beaten features of an old chap in
sailor togs who boarded the boat at
Chester. He spoke to nobody, but sat
in his chair and gazed afar until the
landing was in sight, when he arose,
made voracious inroad on the huge
plug of navy" he had been using on
the trip, took from the folds of his
blouse huge telescope, and proceed
ed to sweep the horizon. Then he
turned, doffed his cap, and courteous
ly passed the glass to the ladies'.
When they returned it, one of them
remarked:
THAT is an excellent telescope, sir"
Yes, miss-it be that" he replied
THAT there scope was given to me
by Lord Nelson"
"Nelson?" repeated one of the
ladies'. "Why, he's been dead nearly a
hundred years."
ell-I'm-blowed!" exclaimed the
sad old tar. SOW the time do fly"
Philadelphia Times.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26
THE SECRET.


The workman wrought fer himself alone
And shaped his fancy in marble stone; .
Strangely hewn To- E!s mood and whim,
Precious and per:,c., il seemed, 10 him:
But the master saw IL and turned away 3
Bitterly smiling. "a vino sho nd say:
Here may na genius. wy son, no douo;,
But only a genius could mo 1t out.
The workman w:r-Sht With sadder
face.
A nobler image Of wondvors grace,
Subtly lovely In limb and line,
Blest with the touch of the gift divine;
But the master sighed, as he held his
hand.
"To Us 'tiS given To understand;
But what is here for the throng below
Our little brothers who Co not know?
The workman summoned his wit and will.
And made figure with pleasing skin.
Set II up where the world might gaze,
And revelod deep in the peoples praise:
But the master fruwurd as he said: My
son,
Worse than this may lever be done
You have mocked the gift OF the gods on
high
For the base delight Of The vulgar eye'
The workman toilcd in sorrow and shame,
Forgot himself and his hope and fame,
Working for nothing hut work alone.
And the thing he fashioned was scarce hS'
own:
But the people wondered and wept and
smiled,
Youth and elder. woman and child;
And the master said: You have done
your part.
The simple truth Is the goal Of art"
Francis Dana, in Youths Companion
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26
Not Goink to he sliRh{s I'd !.

"Ah, what clever man your hus-
band is," said Mrs. Oldcastle. ut was
very lovely of him to tell me that I
was not growing old, but merely
gradually undergoing the transfor-
nation that is necessary to make an
angel of beautiful women. Still,
l gave him Roland Tor his Oliver"
did Josiah give you an Oliver?"
her hostess exclaimed. "Ill make
him give me one the minute he comes
home from the Office. | wonder il
he got it from one of them friends
of his that was here yesterday from
Denver?'-Chicago Record-Herald.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26
Grent Cure.

The Doctor-Yes; | understand what
ails you. You can't sleep. Take this
prescription to the druggist (Next
day)-Good morning; You look better
to-day. Have you slept well?
Petersen-Like a top. | feel like a
new man.
Doctor-IIow many sleeping pow
Jers did you take? e.
Petersen (surpriseO-I didn't take
any. | gave a couple of them to the
baby.-Dagbladet.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26

shut that door." beloved the irate
merchant. "Where were you brought
up. sir-in sawmill?'
"Well, I'm not sure as to that re-
piled the young drummer in honeyed
accents, pressing both hands to his
ears, but of one thing can assure you,
sir, and that is that was not brought
up in boiler factory."-Syracuse
Standard.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26
ExDensiye.

Clarence-What's the matter, old
chap? You look all cut up.
Reginald-My sister is going to mar
ry duke.
Clarence-That's nothing to feel
downhearted over-you ought to be
proud.
! Reginald-Yes; but can't afford to
be proud. It's going to cost the old
man such lot of money that I'll have
/ to go to wOrk.-Judge.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26
His Only Excuse,

"lOur honor" testify cried counsel
for the plaintiff, 81 protest this case
should 80 ON; the defense has secured
many postponemcnts, and it's learned
counsel is never ready because he is
afraid"
i've got a good excuse" interrupted
the learned" counsel for the defense.
Il deny it. Ignorance of the law cX-
cuses no one Philadelphia Press.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26

all hope of seeing him again seemed
to the girl wonderful, and n long
pause ensued before she could trust
herself to frame the first words.
1T was | who was guilty of folly,
not YOU" she murmured, stroking
his check gently; 1T was /, all the
time"
But Dick would not hear of this.
He vowed that he was the original
sinner. and that whatever blame
there was in connection with the
disagreement should rest upon his
shoulders. Thus did the two foolish
mortals wrangle in loving accents,
and it was not until the affair had
been compromised by each allowing
the other to admit that perhaps there
was tiny measure of fault ON both
sides that Olive asked shyly:
"Dick. dear, II want 10 ask you
n question.
go on, my own pet
"What was it that made you re-
solve toto come to see tonight"
A puzzled expression swept over
his features.
u could not very well have done
ANYTHING else" he made answer,
seeing that you limited that if came
back everything would be all right
again"
1t was now Olives turn to look
puzzled
"IIinted?-I don't understand" she
murmured. What hint did ! give,
Dick dear?"
He smiled and placed his hands on
her shoulder.
"Why, you little goose he cried
"surely you haven't forgotten your
sweet advertisement in the agony
column"
"In the agony column?"
She echoed the words with painet
surprise. and it was obvious that he
was speaking to her in the language
of cnigmas.
"Yes: came across il whilst glanc
ing at the Blade at my club this aft
crnoon. and you may be sure los
no time in coming after that. See
here it is"
lie pullcd forth from his breas
pocket the copy Of the newspape
and pointed To an advertisement
which ran thus:
Dick-Forgivc and forget. Perhap
I was wrong. Who knows? But le
bygoncs be bygones and come soon t.
your sorrowing Olive.
A mighty flush came into the girl
cheek as she read the words.
"Dick." she breathed, II ncve
inserted that announcement. INT
this moment had never set my eye
on il. and | cannot for the life of IN
understand how it got into the pa
per-
"But | can" he replied with tiasl
ing ewes. as he threw his arm aroun
her slender waist ana pressed he
more closely to himself-"I cam
"You?"
"Yes. The affair is simply the r.
suit of coincidence of names
blessed and glorious coincidence
|, Gou,c other couple, named respective
ly Olive and Dick. have quarrele'
just as we quarreled. and the Olive {
the advertisement, like good sens
Bile girl, was the first to say com
back"
. Olive nodded sagely.
"Yes," she acquiesced, 'yes. ThG
is the cXplanation."-Chicago Tril
y une.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26
He Had,

"Have you ever written anything"
said his cynical friend, "to make the
world happier or better?"
Rather" quoth the insurance agent
who sometimes dabbled in verse. IL
have written 100000 worth of life in
surance within the last year."-Chi-
Cago Tribune.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26
ExOneratcd.

When the urgent call was received at
the doctors office he was out attend
ing another patient, and consequently
did not reach the house until two hours
afterward. AS he entered he met the
undertaken coming out. "Ah!" he ex-
claimed, with a look OF deep chagrin.
"This IS bad. l am. then, too late
Don't blame yourself" said the un-
dertaker, composedly. 1T is not your
fault. You were not here."-N. y. Her
aid
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26
Her Mothers Friend,

A fond mother impressed upon her
infant daughter that when she was
naughty it was Satan who made her
so. On subsequent occasion there
was an extra disturbance in the
nursery, with much stamping of tiny
feet and arrangement of the furni-
ture. "Elsie," cried her mother, en-
tering the room, "what does this
mean?" And small voice replied,
"Oh, I s'pose it's your old friend
Satan again!"-London Globe.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26
The WEIGHT of Evidence.

First Monkey-Prof. Baboon deliv-
cred quite an interesting discourse
on the question: "Do the human
animals think?"
Second Monkey-What is the pro-
fessor's opinion?
First Monkey-Well, he doesn't
know, exactly. He says they GER
tainly do a good many things which
indicate that they don't.-Puck.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26
A Romance of the
Agony Column.
:::::.::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
BY Marion Morris.

,,EIrIIrp ,f tLor,- ,h,t ie +o soy.
IN nathan Dicl. nrrnsrord nor Olive
poss,,, ,,rito ,,rd.r.tood how the
disbursement which had led TO the
preaN'',S OH "' ',' '!'S"E ,''''"' Law
come 'o"u' o"' '"'" ], ~ -
""IP'"> '"'' P'"P,' "''' ''' INV
'ach ","'' ""'i' - "''"' "''I',''7 ~
an anu """",r ~" INV, '|"''' '',',
pc'''''" >" '''' '''''
'S"I''''' ,""'.'''7 ''''' '''''' -, ~,
''I'a'n S"'" ing P''' '''''''' ~
o'''E SIN "''N' P,''''">!, "',' ''
VI ''" w. "''" ~
WIN '''" I''',' '''''' '""' "''' "'7"
u'oNc ',''' !" '"c N' ~ W
Nn"'",r ''''''' III w. ,'''''''''''.',
""ul" nave r'iUS'" ~ "'',L' I,,
col'sr an" No"'" '''' N''''
I" h!' N"'''"''. ''"'' WV w
nlah,'" I''"'.c'''"' ''''' WI ,l'"
hu' ''VN ','i'S'''" was ''o' '', ,,''
men i''''' was MS I!'',"''''.','''' 't
'aul', eve" 40 IL was ''', i"''' VI Wv
Gun "r i'',"' """ ~, NV "r
oi''e !''"ue ne "'S. o''irui.' M, ~ ~, ". y.
"iie'''oh VI ''''''''' nus >''' -
come ABOUT t""' '"o peoP,'
I,aee ,n,y'Se ,n s,,,,,,,.n S,' ~, ' uU'D'
the intervention of an extraordinary
incident which the lines that follow
will cndeayor to describe.
One evening. some six months aftr,
the canccling of the engage, J.,
Olive sat with her teacup in her ha., !,
looking intensely woebcronc. lie,
mother. who was the only other oc.
cupapt Of the tea table. regarded he,
with anxious expression.
"You look miScra.l". G.ar," She
said, softly.
81 am miserable" replied the girl.
There was a short pause. and then
Mrs. Bassrtt observcd:
ever since Won sent Young Hcres-
ford away YOU have been ANYTHING
but YOURSELF"
Olive laughed bitterly.
81 wish | were ANYBODY but nv
self" she made answer, putting down
her cum with an abrupt gesture. land,
better still. | wish | were dead"
"Oivc,"
"Mothcr, it is the truth I've moth
ing lcf, to live for. and the days seem
to me like weeks"
eft is your own fault, You dis
missed poor Young Rcresford in a
moment of temper and now YOU are
sorry for it,"
"Sorry or not. il was as much his
doinr n, mine. He had no RIGHT
positively no right-to use the words
he did"
II think you were both in the
wrong. and if YOU were sensible YOU
would write him a nice little note
suggesting n reconciliation"
81 would sooner be burned alive
first"
The girls checks famed. and she
STAMPED the floor with her small feet
so passionatelv that Mrs. Bassett
looked up in alarm.
81 love Dick now as have always
loved him" she said presently. but
do You think I could ever humiliate
myself TO do what YOU advise? It's
ont of the question"
.Sunnosc he came back TO Won of
his own accord how tbcno"
Olive shook her head decisivcly.
"You don't know him as | do,
=, -
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26
Opera Night in Eden.
Eve had lust arrayed herself in a

Eve had just arrayed herself in a
girdle 9f s" leayssc 90,
"Oh, ADAM" she cried ecste@t ~,
isn't this just lovely?"
"Beautiful!" assented her spouse,
with n sardonic grin. 81 suppose you
are attired for the opera?"
Hastily linking his arm in hers, he
led the way to a grove where the ptero-
dactyls were singing.-N. y. Times.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26
Following Orders.

Mrs. Hiram Offen-Here, Bridget, see
how dusty it is under the bed.
Bridget-Yes'm.
Mrs. Hiram Offen-IIaven't | i'm
pressed upon you that you must sweep
under the beds?
Bridget-Av course. ma'am. an how
could the dust get there If / hadn't
swept it under?-Philadelphia Press.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26

"Do you think that the world is very
wicked?"
Il assuredly do not" answered Miss
Cayenne. NO on is surprised at any
ones being good. 1t is the normal state
of affairs. 1t is only when people do
wrong that any astonishment is pro-
fessed." Was ashinston Sthf.----s----~A-
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26

The sermon was exceptionally long,
and the minister had just reached the
seventh division of his subject.
And now, dear brethren" he eX-
claimed, what shall | say more?"
amen" suggested the thoughtless
man who had just walked up.-Chicago
Post.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26
Only One of the Kind /.

"Those European kings seem to have
u lot of trouble with their ministers"
Sure"
"Thcy're constantly making changes
in their cabinets"
Naturally"
"Why naturally"
"Because if all the ministers should
be in harmony some day they'd discov-
er that they didn't need king at ALL"
-EruOklyn Eagle.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26
Nine Times Out of Ten.

Archie-Uncle Archibald, what is a
reformer?
Uncle Archibald-A reformer,
Archie, is a man who thinks he can
cover up his own shortcomings by
loudly calling attention to the faults
of other people. Life.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26
Uncle Reuben Snyst

81 kin sot down an glib my feller man
advice by de hour an feel us compIa-
cent as an old hen about it, but de mint
my feller man begins to advi, = me git
all upset ober it an wonder what de
idiot am talkin' 'bout.-Detroit Free
Press
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26
TMO MeapInrs

When first | kissed sweet Marguerite,
When first ! kissed sweet Marguerite,
She blushe6 rose red,
And sternly said:
You mustn't. Stop,!"'
Last night | kissed sweet Marguerite,
Last nigIt l kissed sweet Marguerite.
She blushed rose red,
: But sweetly said:
You mustn't stop"
Utica Observer.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26
Where the Trouble Comes In,

He-I hope you didn't believe what
they said about me.
She-I make it point never to be-
lieve more than half hear.
He-But the trouble is you women
generally believe the wrong half
Brooklyn Life.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1903-03-26
Why:

The day It breaks though It never falls
The reason I'm sure can't see;
The night 1t falls but 1t does not break
It's very perplexing to me!
Nicholas
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1903-01-08
TO ACCEPT
SARTORIS' RESIGNATION
President Wants Reasons for
His Quitting Army.

The President has declined To accept
the resignation of Lieut.. Algernon Sar-
toris of the Tenth Infantry. who is sta
toned at Manila. unless good ana SUM-
Client reasons for the tender are fur
uished by he officer. Lieutenant Sar-
toTis is a son Of Mrs. Nellie Grant SaT-
toris and grandson Of the late Julia
Dent Grant. widow of Gen. L s. Grant
who died last month On the day after
Mrs. Grants death the War Department
received cablegram from Lieutenant
Sartoris rendering his resignation This
caused surprise at the Department. De
cause it was understood that his ambi
ton was 20 serve in the army and that
he was very well satisfied with his pres
EFT position The War Department came
to the conclusion that the resignation
was caused by depression over the news
CT the death Of his grandmother. Of
whom Lieutenant SaTtorts was very
fond
After consultation with the President,
Secretary Root cabIed Lieutenant Sar-
toris that 10 action would be taken until
a statement had been received from him
Of the reasons for his desire to leave
the army letter to the same effect
was sent TO Lieutenant Sartoris by Ad-
jutant General Corbin.
It is believed at the War Department
and by Lieutenant Sartoris' friends that
. by the time General Corbin's letter
reaches him he viii have changed his
mind about resfgnIDz
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1903-01-08
AGREEMENT IN SIGHT
FOR A CUBAN STATION
Better Understanding Sim
plities Negotiations.


\eE'lla''on7 Tor the acquisition Of coal
ing stations in Cuba have been greatly
simplihed through the common under
standing that ,rbfIa this ror.-ur-s,,.
mont. -, -...,..
CIV 9D''s sues i'' 81"
'io"S ''' 'L''s places IN the island, IL has
no intention Of occupying moro than one
Of them. at least for some time 70 come
Tho rrorera5 s+,. g.. C..--..-.--
-..,----.. -
','7', II Is regarded 7S
lhe pest place In ali the island, STRATEGY
caily. geographically. and. in every other
way. for naval base intended IN he
used in operations for the defense of The
Caribbean.
The two other stations are Cienfaeqos
on the south coast and Pahfs 5Fon5a -,
the north coast. The places ORIGINALLY,
selected on the north coaef were t5,,,,r,
or some place in Havana barbor and
Nine Owing ~ obfso-f,,-. e-,-,, ~. -,
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1903-01-08
MARINE BAND MEMBERS
LODGE A COMPLAINT
MaICOHtents Assert That Germans Have
Practical Monopoly of Promotions.

Because OF the jealousy that has exist
cd in the Marine Band for some time.
caused by the promotion Of more Ger
mans that representatives. OF ali other
nations. complaint against Lieutenant
SanteImann. director Of the organization.
has teen sent up TO the commanlant o.
the Marine Corps and may reach Sec
rotary Moody. of the Navy.
John F Esputa. slice trombone
player of reputation. is at the head Of
the movement and be has Interested with
him number of Italian. French. Eng
lish ana American musicians They
charge shat the director has promoted
a. number of members of the band with
out taking into consideration the expert
ence and abilities Of other members.
The particular charge against Licuten-
ant Santelmann IS that he acted unIs irlv
n indorsing discharge given Esputa.
Attorney David E. Anthony is looking
after the interests of the complainant
and the papers in the case are now in
transmission 20 the commandment Of the
Marine Corps. number Of designations
have been rendered and several dismis-
sails have been made. Until 1ral action
is taken in the case. the marine officers
refuse to talk about the matter
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1903-01-08
BILL TO MEET CURRENCY
NEEDS OF ALL SECTIONS
Representative MOrrell Plans
an Expert Commission.

4 plan 10 provide the currency Lexis
lation demanded By bankers and fuau-
cial men throughout the country has
been devised by Representative Morreu
OF Pennsylvania. It proposes the appoint
meHt by the President Of commission
which shall have the power 10 investi-
gate the present financial needs Of the
United States ard report with recon-
mendattons for remedial legislation az
the next Congress.
Representative MorreH has set forth
his views in The form Of a joint resoIu-
ton. which he has INTRODUCED in the
House. The resolution states that the
accumulation of money in the Treasury
from revenues and the impossibilffv nm
der existing laws OF putting Ct into cir
cuIatiou except through certain restrict
ed channels has resulted in great dis
tress at various times in financial cir
cles.
The proposed commission is TO consist
% the Secretary Of the Treasury. the
Comptroller Of the Currency and as
many other members as the President
may deem necessary TO secure proper
representation OF all sections Of the
countrE
Speaking of the plan Mr.. MorreH said
that system satisfactory 70 Eastern
bankers might be found fun OF defects
by Western fnanciers and business men.
In the same way a system devised By
Eastern and Western bankers might not
suit he needs OF the South. In order that
all sections OF the country should be
treated fairly law should be devised
which would give equitable relief in
times Of stTingeucy 10 all.