davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1903-07-06
BOWSER GETS MAD
He Tries to Make His Wife Believe That May Apples
 Grow on Trees and, as Usual, Is Worsted

But where are you going now?' she asked as he started down the hall.
 ITO investigate matters. If it be- comes necessary I'll go ten miles into the country and pull up May apple tree by the roots and bring 1t back to show you"
 MT. Bowser's family butcher came from the country and has always con- tinued in touch with it, and it was like ly that he knew. all about May apples. When questioned on the subject in a careless way he replied:
 May apples? Why, my dear man, every six-year-oId child in the country knows what they are"
 How tall are the trees they grow on?" cautiously asked MT. Bowser.
 How tall are the trees pumpkins and squashes grow on?" laughed the butcher You are not foolish enough to think that May apples grow on trees, hope. You meant vines, didn't you?"
 MO, sir. I neant trees. know they grow on trees" >
 "Then mandrakes and leeks must grow in your hat. You are on false trail and had better give it up. Might ask the plumber, though. He owns farm yet, believe"
 MT. Bowser asked the plumber whether he had any May apple trees on his farm, and the man of solder looked at him in a curious way and replied:
 ''No, not any. If I had should pre- sent them to a museum. When May apples take to growing on trees shall expect to see corn growing on vines. You'd better go out into the country for day and look around"
 MT. Bowser was not satisfied. In his minds eye he could see bushels and bushels of May apples growing on dozens and dozens of trees as he walk ed in the direction of his family drug store He could almost taste the fruit as he entered.
 "Well, Bowser. what's up?" was the greeting of the druggist.
 Nothing much. Didn't you used to live on a farmT
 ''I did, my boy. and wish I was back there"
 You must know what May apples are?'
 'As well as know what grass is."
 And what does May apple tree look nkeY
 The druggist laughed a long, loud horse laugh and then sobered up and said: - ""Better go home and call doctor, old man." t,t '.-.
 "Why?"
 Because you've got 'en. and got 'em bad, You'Il be seeing rats before morn ing"
 ''Sir, you are fool and Harp ex- claimed MT. Bowser as he turned away and stnrted for home, with his ears twitch3ug,
 He tried to open the front door so softly that Mrs. Bowser couldn't hear him, but as he closed it she stood in the door of the sitting room and asked: Well, dear, did you bring me home some sand to pound?"
 He waved his arms about his head, but did not answer And have you got to staxt- for the
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1903-07-06
MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.

Tn Hungary the prices of veterinary medicines are fixed by the ministry of agriculture.
 pitfalls spent g 125 last year upon ten tons of inseedmeal for making poul- tices.
 Berlin has now "bachelors' club" divided into small flats, with smoking and dining-rooms in common, where single men can live at moderate rates.
 It is one of the peculiarities of travel by balloon that you do not feel any 7 thing; all is still with you, no matter if you are in the teeth of the hurri- cane.
 The oil wells of Peru yield an aver age of 60 barrels 8 day of a quality corresponding to that of the Russian petroleum from Batoum, being s4 per cent. carbon. The oil of the United States averages 50 per cent. carbon.
 The cocoa palm, from which choco- late comes, bears its pods. which con- tain IS to 25 beans each, at 10 to f2 feet from the ground. Four hundred trees are planted on an acre, and each yields about one dollars worth of beans.
 The London Lancet says that since bacteriology has become a recognized branch of medical science, too much attention has been directed to the germs, and not enough to the soil in which they grow. It reminds its read- CTS that bacteria cannot flourish in a healthy body.
 All the lynchings within 21 years that he could verify have been tabu- lated by MT. Cutler, of Yale university. In that time 1,s7e negroes have been lynched and 1,25e whites. Since the whites are about six times as numerous as the blacks, the proportion of ne- groes lynched is, of course, very much higher than these figures indicate.
 John T. Gibbons is quoted as saying that in boyhood his brother, now car dinal and archbishop, delighted in athletic exercises, played 8 rattling game of baseball, was a splendid swim- mer, and withal was very methodical. He had acertain time for study, a time for play and time for prayer. He was boy of system, just as hsis to-day 8 man of system"
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1903-07-06
A Beggar,s Trick.

A sympathetic woman who waa walking along lower Sixth avenue the other morning was greatly touched by. seeing ragged man eagerly snatch a crust out of the gutter and deyour it voraciousiy. She drew out her purse immediately, bestowed coin On the man and hurried away. Her destina- tion led her to mount to the platform of the elevated station whence she ob- served the ragged man still loitering on the sidewalk below. He glancedr furtively about and then drew anothexs. crust from his pocket and east it into the gutter. The train bore away yery angry woman philan nthropist XsII Sun.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1903-07-06
LOST GRIP OF A GAS TRUST.
Why n Certain New York Town StiII Depends Upon Candles and
 Lamps for Light.

Towns are like individuals. They seldom get over early prejudices. There is one town within days travel of New York where majority of the residents still burn lamps and candles in preference to gas.
 The town has never run away with itself, but it has managed to keep in sight of the procession by jogging along at 8 conservative gait, except in the way of light. One of it's in- habitants who was here the other day explained what to some people Is peculiarity of his town, relates the New York Sun.
 "A good many years ago." he said, "after good deal of dickering and persuasion. our town gave the right of way to a gas company to lay mains and put up lamp-posts. The people, however, declined to have gas in their houses or in their places of business. Women were afraid of it, and that settled it.
 "A year or so later a denomination that had number of rich members built a new church. It would have been an attractive edifice for even a more pretentious town. After it was completed bishop was invited to dedicate it.
 s'The gas company saw in the event an opportunity to crush out a prejudice, and proposed to light the new church on the night of the ded- ication with gas. The main in the street was tapped and pipe was run into portable gas reservoir which stood in front of the church. From this rubber tubes were dis tributed through the church.
 ''As the gas was turned into the reservoir, it gradually expanded the rubber lining until the latter as- sumed the proportions of an inflated balloon. A gas company would not do it that way now, but it was the only way known at the time l men tion.
 ''The crowd was outside instead of in. The gas display was a revelation to the town. About the only people in the church were the bishop, the minister, the choir and the gov ernors of the church. The choir sang all the music it knew, and still the congregation tarried without,
 ''Some time after the hour when the service should have been under way there was an explosion. The lining of the reservoir burst. The crowd scattered. Tho lights in the church were extinguished.
 "A few minutes later the bishop ard the minister and the choir and the governors escaped by windows and doors. The atmosphere that hangs over a glue factory was like new-mown hay compared with that of the vicinity of the new church.
 "Of course, after the explosion had occurred every old woman in the town said she knew it would And they still believe it Is liable to burst any minute, and that Is why our town, moderately up to date in other respects, is still burning kero- gene and candles in it's houses.
 "Some of the more modern folks have ventured to try electric lighting, but there Is one town in this country where no gas trust ever got in it's, uuorLxO
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1903-07-06
D1mC0ntenf.

D&nCOntenfs I knew fellow once that had a horse That trotted at a very merry clip, But he was very sad at heart because He had no whip. knew @ fellow once that found @ whip, But he was not content with 1t, ox course, For after that he wished and wished and wished He had horse! Now, if the two had met and made a, swap Each would have got the thing he 50 desired, But neither would have been quite satis- fled Which makes me tired!
 Baltimore News
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1903-07-06
Graaa Stains.

Grass stains in the children's gar- ments are, among the sure indications of the outing season. Unless such biemishes are removed before going to the laundry 1t is difficult matter to eradicate them. A soaking in alcohol and subsequent rubbing with the fln- gers is 3 simple cure if promptiy au- pNed,
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1903-07-06
Not wiHlie's Fault.

Mother-Willie, you must stop asking papa questions. Don't you see they an- noy him?
 Willie-1No, ma'am; it ain't my ques- tfons that annoy him.
 Mother-Willie!
 Willie-No, ma'am; it's the answers he can't give that make him mad Philadelphia Record.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1903-07-06
Popula
Total population of Guam .....

Agana is situated on the shore on the northwestern side of the island. It is the principal town and in the Span ish regime the government buildings were here, and 1t is here also that the United States navy department now has it's headquarters. The Americans have made many improvement since their occupancy and Agana is now a fairly clean city, with good streets and good government buildings.
 Agana has one great disadvantage in being five miles from the harbor of San Louis d'Apra- This necessdtates a long haul for all government sup- plies. There are two posts main tained on the island; one is at Agana and the other, the Presidio of Asan, is mid- way between the harbor of San Louis d'Apra and the city of Agana. It is at the Presidio that the Ao-odd Filipino prisoners were confined. In all there were about 200 marines stationed at the two posts.
 In the center of Agana the Amer ioans have built & very pretty plaza, about which are the public school buildings, the marine barracks, the jaif and the palace or government house. Here on the plaza concerts are given twice a, day by the Marine band.
 The Americans have made other inn provements in the way of a we'll equipped sawmill and woodworking plant. When the ice plant was first built the weather in Agana became ex- ceptionally cool for Guam. It was mo- ha& 1A muttering and discontent among the natives, and it was learned that the Chamorros believed that the ice plant was cooling the climate, and they feared that they would be obliged to move away from Aganta. This would have been great sacrifice on thei1 part, as 1t is the ambition of every Chamorro to own a house, however small, in the city of Agana.
 The houses of the lower class are made of ifil wood, and great number are made of bamboo also. They have roofs of thatch, braided from leaves of the cocoanut palm. This thatch lasts for about five years. The houses of the poorer class are, with the exception of a settee, almost destitute of furniture. The natives sleep on the floor on mats braided from leaves of the screw pine. The cooking is done on the ground in & small lean-to. These houses are raised on posts, four or five feet from the ground. The space underneath is for the pigs and chickens, who are the scavengers. The poorer natives live closely packed together, and it is no uncommon thing for 16 or IF people to live and sleep in a house only 16 feet square.
 The Chamorro resembles the Fiji pino in looks and size, although he has not the same sharp, bright appearance. The mans dress consists of suit of pajamas, and he will wear his shirt outside his trousers. He speaks 1an- guage of his own, not like Spanish at all. As an illust ra tion: Boom" means a big noise and "boom-boom" means a great deai bigger noise.
 Probably his worst failing is lazi- ness. About 30 cases of feprosy have been discovered on the island. These unfortunates have been removed to a s colony built for them. Of course lep- rosy can be traced directly to unclean- Illness and laziness.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1903-07-06
An,ersca,s sndsana.

Ethnologists are of the opinion that when America was discovered there were not on the continent of North America any more Indians shan exist noWs~gnogledge.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1903-07-06
At The Dtmc Nruseum.

Ella Fantine (the Fat Woman)-T wouldn't marry you if every design on you was by one of the old masters. When say no, mean no, and no pow CT on earth can move me!
 N. D. R. Ink (the tattooed man)- Say, I guess you've never seen a steam derrick at work! rooklyn Life.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1903-07-06
Ratrihutton.

First Mosquito-The experts are trying to murder us.
 Second Mosquito Don't fear; we'll soon put sAsm hsAipd bagssJqdge.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1903-07-06
Healthy Kentucky Family.

"A healthy family is that of Lewis and Virginia Green, of Bell county, Ky. He is 93.. and she is one year younger. They were married 7s years ago, and still occupy the house they went to as bride and groom. They have ten children, the youngest of whom is 4s years of age, There has never been a death in the Eamily, and very little sickness.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1903-07-06

idiot asylum in the mornIngy'
 He choked and gasped and gurgled, but as the words would not come he dodged into the library and locked the door. M. QUAD.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1903-11-29
Cuy property for Sale or TO Let.
Jersey City.

" with 10 base p5eT y 5ersey City. s6 - IT
Jersey City. - SSkGESS. Id Broadway
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1903-11-29
Teachers.
Dancing academy.

T GEORGE pODvORTH.
Il East 43tn ST
Gases an Private LessoaA
ash Season Nov op~A
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1903-11-29
a D'EKIisENE''Ts and subscription. for N, rr1sun.
received al their Uptown oro.
NO. I.S8s BRoaD,v.

AoFertlHennsnts win ~ receires a N. ,,,, -.
o-S Al regular casoe rstes untg g iiS o'4aen
eln-aFe' = e cor 22d-s,.: I5s sth-.,. = vs. -
.. " EaAt lsth-st-; 2s7 West ga. 'i- - -.
-. 90 A'es sSs West I25th-st: I.sss sS-ax.- ne
-. 'a'n and 18th stss LOIS 3d-aYe nea. -. :. .
W. isi-aFe. near gsrh-sf; f57 D., g.,
o. GO sd-aye.. near 4iss, ~. '"D
o.. .n.stoHher-st Brooklyn. n. Y-ate -.
. saniih-st I.0Oi Gafes-ave Nera,l 81.
ct Also az A. d. 7. one. ~ iva
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1903-11-29
MARYLAND.
CARVEL HALL,
NE W-JERSEY.


Attractive resort for white months. Temperature IS
degrees miller than New 70 k New Hotel; modern with
every convenience and comfort j. G. BOYLE Manager
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1903-11-29

MARLBOROUGH HOUSE
VI ATLANTIC CITY. N. J.
JOSIAH WHITE & SONS. PROPS
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1903-11-29
Country Property for Sale.

DOCHEILE PARK ". Eleven room modern ncuse
TX fro bathrooms. omen pumrfnr three spiscsss
acetyIene lighting system: vsranda. three acres
Outouiidings i've
rom station: OBTAINED partlv furashed M DESIRED
AZ a very rsasonabe price Apply 20 G = = -<EftSON
fsa MaIT-sL, Hackensack. J. A GRAHAM On the
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1903-11-29
Brooklyn Property for Sale.
PRETTIEST ROW IN TOW
SARATOGA HEIGHTS.

New brick ane stone family houses. double Improve
rents: high ground. $500 cash. balance Ike rent;
minutes 70 Manhattan; Potts Partrldgs owners. oil
Marks anc Saratoga avenues; near cars
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1903-11-29
Railroads.

PENNSYLVANIA
81 RAILROAD.
STATIONS foss e wEs TEYTIT5s sPR sTEz
y The leaving time from Desbrosses and Corrlands
Streets IS Ave minutes than that given below
for Tysentythr street Station. except whsrs other
wise noted
7.55 A. VI FAST MAIIA--ParIor. slsspins, and Dining
Cars Fer Chesg2 indian4P2I Pnd slss1,a
smoking, ana Observation Cars Cincinnati Indian
Ios5 4. N. -o PENNSYLVANIA LIMITED-PulLn.n
G Rns oT chaaso aea Tofsdo and
I For r N VI GIc1 1 nnat and IoaiSvlis7 la
d.aGsR9i' c Gffess2o & La MITE sle.pnr
smoking; and Observation Cars For chicago To-
SIS sa F. NJ ST LOUIS ExPREss-Eor PtsssourE cia
s cam F6P earg " T VIA Vass
SIS 50f p N. WESTERN ExrEEss-Eor calaass. For
T9i9a0 s1fsPts IFIc FxPREss prtssurs To-
sdI a Vn ReUts Connects for Cleveland sTcsps
ass p. Il. CLEVELAND AND c1NCINxATI Ex-
PREssGFoT Pittsburg, Cleveland cincinnatI In
s.S5 P. n PTTTsBURG sPECIAL-Daily for rifs-
wAsHisGToN AND THE SOUTH
7ss SIS .191o GDessross' and SSE5sse.
strseis I9Io9 5.rSs,s sor "a Is consrsssssnsi
Lited s Parior and PIl9g S 5Iss; 4s
p n. Y 70 night SUNDAY rs g 2S 10 3 a m
Dining CaTs). ~5735. - %. Ass (Desorcsses and
T9Tlana! ssssff AZ 2s sas tss
AT raG F1S1' c S1 LINE-EzDrss. as and
sEIs6aRD AIR LINE RAILwAT.-Expr... lass
s;6RFoIK AND WESTERN RAILwAY--For Mem
crRRE HES PEAKE OHIO RAILwAY.-7.5s q week
6 days o and t Po1Rr coMFoRT and NoRroLk-zss
AfI.R Il Tes cTTY-s5 $ and 2sS xs-ssay.
T Panof Cars I99 sad Standard c0as6ss Pas
ior Smoking Parior Cars Dining Car and Standard
Coaches sundays
For 5oints on New York Long Branch Railroad cror,
West Twenty-third Street St2riorl- SO a N, Z =.
s25 as p n sn5 e 50 g' sror, Bsssrosss. al
Cortlan1t Streets 100 a 1880 8 20 10 . a. and
u rs night weekdays Sundays. t@lS 80 m. 400
FOR PHILADELPHIA
so5 72s sz5 SIS SIS. s925 l955 81 Louis I'm
ten 80 10 GDes5rosses cortland Streets 10 2os.
20 1essrossss ana corIandt Streets 2aop as
.3S5 ass 423 s4.25 $50 ga s. Chicago Limited.
OR Norris PhilsdeIphis onIy, 'S as az - a. ~
CO. 59T sIndaVs s o. .755 3 % 25 30 IS Sc
Louis L'ni,sd0 95S l-1025 Psnna- Limited. 'ioss
limited for North Philadelphia ony) Ass. -SSS I5s
SOS 925 % So Cor North PhiladsDhia onl) p i21o
nlght
Ticket offces Nos 4s1 1854 26I B-osdvsy;
Ffth CbeIow 23d Stl 2SS Ftfth Avenue corner
fsrookyn Court Street Fulton Street 800 Broad
vay Pennsylvania Annex Station The New York
from hotels ard residences through 20 destination
Railroad CAB Service.
W w ATTERBTRY ? WOOD.
Genera Manager Pass'r Traro Mane~s
GEO W BOYD
General Passenger Agent
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1903-11-29
Real Estate Wanted.

yXrANTED-A farm. thar minutes crous
w have nifty acres or nlors and Dnc<
cuttings Address c. Box u. Tribune Crics-
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1903-11-29
ATLANTIC CITY, N. ].
HOTEL RUDOLF,

ATLANTIC CITY. N. J.
Open all yea. n. Y Rep. Park Place. win eSil 9
residences upon application
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1903-11-29

I1ARM FOR SALE-situatsd IN Stspnsntovn. nile
IL from depot rad 70 Berlin. never been
rented and house. 10 good repair VII S5e
% cows year around. pastures sei
milk NeW-Y Irk city excellent place
desiring home or farning lnlairs
OF Mrs NJ LINDSAY StephentJwn. Rensselaer, Co. " L
S0 Q00 ACRES timber and mineral and 700 900 800
CU.UUU feet standing timber han pine. nsif oaks
never has log cut; splendid Investment cne@S
cash: close partnership. W. n LANE Trenton Mo-
La correspondencia de Puerto Rico. (San Juan, P.R.) 1890-1943, 1903-10-03
EI mOnOpOIlO del pan slgus On pI6

Por mas que la prensa de todos MAJ
tices, ha combatido la inopinada alga
en- el expendio del pan, el monopolio
de ese artfcuIo sigue en- pie.
No solo es de lamentar este, sin6
que Ia naala calidad del pan no ha me-
jnrado, a6n euando 81 precio se haya
subido.
sQu6 hay en- esto2 Que hay en- 81
fondo de esta cuesti6n2
No queremos hacernOs eco de 10 que
por ahf Sc dice. porque las autOridades
de Sanidad son las llamadas & interVe-
mir en- ciertasrosas. " peor para elias
81 no 10 hacen asf, pues dan lugar 6
suposiciones " sospechas.
Sc paga aqui Ell pan caro- malo.
I sin embargo, y pesar de los cIa-
mores de Ia opinion p6blica, ell mono
polio contin6a burlandose sus autores
de todO y de todos.
Nos pr0ponemos tratar este asunto
con al inter9s que 81 merece = desen-
trafiar, 81 nos fuera possible, la verdad
de los feos rnmores que por ahf
circular.
La correspondencia de Puerto Rico. (San Juan, P.R.) 1890-1943, 1903-10-03
''cOmItaa IN Public InsiI-
iallOnS and Property

San Juan, Puerto Rico. 81 de Sep
tiemhre de 1908. La Comisi6d de Ins
tituci6nes P6blicaa y Propiedades. en-
cargada de informar sobre Ia construc-
ci6n de una nueya Penitenciaria, en-
su nombre Ia Comisi6n especial desig-
NADIA para elegir sitio aprop6sito para
dicho establecimiento, invita- & los
Ayuntamientos del Iitoral de la isla, &
ofrecer una parcela< terreno que rem
ma condolences para Ell obieto indicado.
El terreno debera ser de una extension
aproximada de Glen cuerdas de facil ais
Iamiento, con agna potable corriente v
con materiales de construction pr6xi-
mos, como piedra, MADEIRA, etc.
Las Corporaciones quienes pueda
interesar este asunto. pueden dirigir
se al Presidente de la COmisi6n. don
j. Gomez Brioso, p. O. Box 42-San
Juan. hasta ell 1ia 10 del pr6ximo mes
de Octubre.
Por 6rden del Comite, Caas M0gee,
Secretary Executive Council.
La correspondencia de Puerto Rico. (San Juan, P.R.) 1890-1943, 1903-10-03
D. .. Cosss.

La emigraci6n & Mexico por fin es
un hecho.
Aver salio pTecssGD5e1ate ell vapor que
ha deaIevar & las etierras calientes de
Yucatans nuestros infelices compa-
triotas, que aquf padecian atroces me-
cesida1es v que acaso les reserve ell
destino terlibies infortunios en Ia nue.
VI paEria que pronto pisar&n.
El vapor Sc enCamina & GuSnica.
En- este puerto rec0gera los emigran-
tes de Rhf " los del terrnino de Ponce.
Luego seguir1 viaie Mayagfiez Y
aqui recoger6 los ennigrantes de esa
ciudad de Uab0 ROio. partiendo des-
pues con direction & Puerto Plata y
do aquf harS rumbo al puerto de la
Ascenci6n, en Ell Estado de Yucat&n,
Rep6blica Mexicana.
En- 81 vapor que aver saIi6 de este
puerto para hacer esq travesia va ell
sefIor Ramon Hoyos Delgado, qnian
Sc despidi6 de nosotros visibiemente
emocibnado. Deseamos & este v & los
inforthnados compatriotas que le acom-
panan toda suerte de prOsperidades en-
ID patria de Ju6rez s Hidalgo.