Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1903-08-15
ARCULARIOUS E:
Nv BY 6l1iIIfdm II. ~
Osborne
Copyright, 1903, by T. c. Mcclure.
Observation-Disclosures

stood in line with all the other push
cart men in the little back street where
the fruit cellars were, and loaded up
with yellow bananas And Arcularious
took good care to be among the few
that got the best for the least money
Had not his mother and his father
kept little shop in Athens where one
went in and bought in the dark and
came out and found out he had been
swindled in the light? Arcularious
knew how just to manipulate bit Of
fruit to make it look large and sound.
In order to make peddling a success
in great city there are two classes
you must conSider-first, the public;
next, but not least, the police. The
public is always ready to buy, but the
police are not always willing to let you
sell. Arcularious, of course, had IL
cense. This permitted him under the
law to remain stationary at the curb
for the space of three minutes. Under
the police it was different Arcularious
noted out Of the corner Of his eye that
a patrolmans idea of three minutes
was highly elastic.
"G'wan, now!" exclaimed Officer Null
ligan to Arcularious just as the latter
was pulling into, not away from, the
curb. "G'wan; you been here long
enough, you Hungarian" Arcularious,
the first time this happened, started to
explain-first, that he was not Hun
garian; second, that he had not been at
a standstill for even three seconds.
'Gwan, now!" exclaimed Mulligan,
giving him sudden push that knocked
his special three cent fruit into the
street. "None O. yer lip!''
Arcularious cleared out. At first he
couldn't understand it, but by GInt OF
frequent inquiry he found that three
minutes, from the police point OF view,
was chronologically a cipher unless
Unless you creased the officers palm
with a substantial portion of your prof
it's. Under such circumstances three
minutes might extend itself into three
hours, and the law, which takes no note
of trifes, would never know the differ
ence.
But Arcularious, whose remote an
cestor doubtless held the pass at Their
mopylae, rebelled. That which the law
vouchsafed unto him-that, he reasoned
with himself, he must have.
'"These man. he reasoned with him
self, referring to Policeman Mulligan-
''these man! I shall get even = very
even, with these man!'
1t has ever been mooted question
whether the policeman was made for
the side door or the side door for the
policeman. There were several side
doors on Policeman Mulligans beat,
like as not all made for him. At any
rate, he made for them with a persist
ency worthy Of better cause. But the
powers that be had tabooed the side
door practice. So it was only when the
coast was clear that Mulligan deigned
to enter.
"And to Think he complained bit
terly, chat year ago I cd stand out
in the street and drink a pailful. All,
g'wan, you dirty Eyetalian! Git out o
there!' Arcularious picked up his mud
died fruit and once more went his way.
Next day he reappeared, but not
alone. He brought with him three
bright eyed, curly headed boys from his
tenement house. Each Of them had
banana in his hand. Mulligan loOmed
up around the corner and made for an
Interesting side door. AS he entered it
four pairs of eyes were fixed upon him.
'"These man." explained Arcularious
to his creW-"you watch these man.
See, it is Hennessey, No. A." he con-
Ginued, indicating the name and num-
Der of the saloon. Mulligan was inside
for fifteen minutes He came out wip-
ing his mouth upon the back of his
hand. ArculariOus drew away and kept
on the move, continually following Null
4igan at a respectful distance. The boys
continued to eat bananas. Four times
they saw the officer enter saloon, and
the smallest lad, who could tell time,
calculated that Mulligan had spent
over an hour in half a day at the pleas
ant occupation. At about o'clock Ar
cularious placed his cart squarely in
front of one of Mulligan's favorite
cafes. Mulligan was inside and soon
came out He was red in the face.
Get out o. herev' he exclaimed,
swinging Arcularious with a vicious
Jolt against the cart. The boys looked
ON.
What for you do this, No. 337,' in
quired Arcularious, squirting in
knowing way at the officers helmet.
Jaw, say now" demanded Mulligan,
'you fellows is stowin' away the stuff.
Say, gimme a quarter a week, an I'll
let you alone
Arcularious shook his head. "From
me- he replied, nothing. 1 demand
my rights"
Mulligan grew redder in the face and
charged on the Greek. "Y'ain't got no
rights, you Chinaman!
Arcularious smiled. "You have no
rights to be so much in these places"
Behind him, their faces on a broad grin,
stood the three urchins.
1--WE saw yez four times" they said