The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-12-07
ole SEARCH FOR A JOB
Boston Herald.)

meaning OF toll was certainly born
with a golden spoon in his mouth. and
has never changed his address for the
most sUn-faVOred spot Of that reserved
thoroughfare known as Easy street
OInerWlSe as sure as Wild geese follow
leading hOnker, he would have had
that never to- be-forgotten experience
OF lokng for a job, or. TO be more eu-
phontouS, a business or trade cOnnec-
ton Unless one of fortunes special
pets, he would have been convinced
that the Edenic command, ordering
man to earn his bread by the sweat
Of his brow, as a rule, goes If any
thing does. And, ere this, I fear me,
IL would be established in his mind, be-
yond a doubt. that work has TO be fer
reted for, especially if one Of the men
who take little stock i'm such adages as
"a rolling stone gathers no moss, the
cObbler is not to go beyond his last,
and so on If an impulsive nature.
rather than a philosOphic one. he might
have prayed less and damned more. TO
pass a left-handed blessing on the
promitive coquette who forgot that
owed her posterity.
My friend we win take it you have
been reared as a Christian should, and,
having taken to heart the lessons
learned at your mothers knee, you
walk as a man should. Giving you
your due, you are q clean member or
society, and one worthy Of a chance
To sweat yourself into a suit of clothes
and seat at some dining table
You have a cali on the worlds re-
spect, because your friends tell you
that you are possessed Of an open,
honest cOuntenance. which pronounces
you a man fit to be trusted. This you
firmly believe. for you see it whenever
you gaze in a mirror. But the moment
you strike the ragged edge Of fate, with
nothing save the chisel of hope and the
mallet Of energy to cut your name on
the adamantine monument Of success,
you come out your dream. It then hap
pens to you your friends are troubled
with strabismus or some such disease
Of the eye. which prevents thir seeing
straight and that your mirror is a
merciful liar Either that. or appear
ances must be surely deceptive when
they seem to indicate that YOU are not
quite the worst looking devil on earth.
Oh, no, we never know what suspi-
cious appearing characters we are until
we look for job. We never wonder
how it is We have managed to keep
from the clutches of the law until we
have been questioned by the judges
holding court wherever there is an Of
fering vacancy.
Poor devil looking for a job. how you
are to be pitiedl And more's the pity,
verify, that, in this world, is like the x
in algebrafe proDositions-an unknown
quantity.
Unfortunately, time hangs heavy on
your hands, because you have been Civ
en- to understand a certain firm had 20
curtal expenses by discharging help,
we viii say. Therefore, to keep away
from the bricks, and to fulfill your i'm
uar oh fcraf To "a al
clothing, tOOthpick and a number of
other trusts, you search for another
job.
You see an advertisement in a morn
ing paper that - 113" needs help, or
perhaps, you hear that another unfor-
tunate has lost his job, leaving an open
ing for some man. Thinking you have
a right to the title the bimanous mann
NAL has assumed, and feeling yourself
possessed Of those qualities which viii
enable you to develop a valuable ad-
junct to any business, you take time by
the fOrelock in an attempt to once more
get into business. That is. you imme-
diately determine to send in your bid
for a chance to keep your mind en-
gagged, as well as to give your digestive
organs something to do. Truly, a wOr-
thy determination.
Having given the matter serious
thought, you write a letter in your best
diction and most elegant penmanship.
In this prayer, from the soul for the
stomach's sake, you say some very
pretty things about your character and
qualifications, refer to a number Of
solid men to whom you trust you are
well and favOrably known, and close
the beggar's appeal by respectfully
craving permission to present your per-
son for examination. Then you mail
your earnest request, hoping a post
mans call viii, in early return, bring a
raissiye which will give you to under
stand there is balm in Gilead.
Yes, you mail your application, and
you hope on, but, say TO say, your an
ucipations are tinged with mistrust,
for this is not the first time you have
been out Of a Job. In your previous
experiences, trying to let yourself out
at so much a week, you may have
wasted such a quantity of writing ma
terial as to warrant your believing you
are on earth for the sole benefit of pen,
ink and paper manufacturers.
Experiences looking for a job? All,
yes, you have had your share Of them.
Time after time you have begged for
a connection with some occupation
which would furnish you a visible
means Of support and prevent your be-
ing arrested on the charge Of vagrancy.
But in ninety mine cases out of a hun
dred If some firm did reply to your
solicitation il was to tell you there
was no vacancy, but that your appli-
cation would be placed on file for fu-
ture reference, when help would be
needed. You are not told, Of course, it
would be safe to bet. that help would
not be required until hens gave milk.
Out OF a holy regard for your SEN
sitiveness st is not intimated that there
are fully 10000 such like bids filed
ahead of yours in the waste basket.
No, you are let down easy; and. to
comfort your troubled mind, they eX-
press regret for their inability to at
tend to your case at the present writ
ing. How solacing.
AS mentioned above you wrote to
"Z-113," and many such addresses, but
all in vain, for the letter which you
longed for never came. You called
here and there. but the outcome was
trouble for nothing. At last letter
addressed TO Lord knows who, "P. o..
Box 29,003," brings a reply which al
most paralyZes you, for il requests a
call at the Office OF Messrs. So-and-So
to see Mr. Catechist.
At once up goes the mercury of an
ticipation, and you feel that the head
wind and cross tide Of hard luck are
possibly about TO change, so that you
can weather the storm. You fancy q
break in the clouds, and maybe the
sun is going to shine for you as it does
for others. You tickle your fancy with
the thought Of soon having a job which
viii enable you to have your shoes
soled and afford you a chance to let
your stomach know that your throat
is not cut.
Having had a shave, you dress your
self as near the moment al your ward