The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1903-02-26
A PREMATURE
ENGAGEMENT


called out to the colonel:
'"The judges have decided that your
regiment has been slaughtered"
Field officers all killedT
Every one"
Good" said the colonel, sheathing
his sword and unclasping his belt.
"Since | am dead I'll take snack"
The colonel called for his haversack,
spread his luncheon on a napkin, ate
| his fill. washed it down with a pull at
! his flask and lighted cigar. He was
rather young for a colonel, only TWEEN
/ ty-fve, but a bloody war had killed off
O lot of men ahead of him. The sun
/ was hot. and he was very drowsy, so
! be left his men and walked away to a
tree. under whose limbs he stretched
/ his graceful figure.
He was sleeping soundly when one
of the contending generals rode by. the
general on whose side the colonel was
arrayed. He was accompanied by his
staff and his daughter, riding a brown
filly and clad in habit trimmed with
| gold lace.
What's the matter with Colonel Lis
! terY' demanded the general.
He's dead" replied the lieutenant
colonel, coming up.
The generals daughter shrieked,
threw up her hands and would have
! fallen from her horse had not the chief
of staff caught her. There was SEN
sation among the officers present, but
no one laughed. A sudden thrill, like
a death struggle, passed through the
coloners body. but beyond this he
showed no signs of consciousness. The
general flashed a glance at his daugh-
ter as though he wished a stray shot
would knock out her silly brains.
He's not really dead, Miss Rosa
mond," whispered the chief Of staff.
This is sham, you know"
"Ohw gasped the lady, turning Grim
son. No one could tell whether she
was pleased or grieved at the informa-
ton.
Didn't the Tenth carry the works
on Chuckers hill?" asked the general.
mo, general" replied the lieutenant
COLONEL the judges decided that we
were slaughtered and all the field Of
ficers killed"
"Humphv' replied the commander.
''The matter should have been reported
to me at once" And, putting spurs to
his horse, he rode on, followed by his
daughter, staff and escort.
They were no sooner out of sight
! than the colonel sat up.
That's the most ridiculous give
away | ever heard of. That's why we
can't make soldiers of women. No mat
ter how strong a front they present,
| there's no knowing but that If mouse
should run through their ranks they
would give way to panic. Here I've
been hanging about her for months,
cringing, pleading, she throwing me
| off, fooling me all the while, only to
let it out in this silly fashion. Well,
she's in for it now. It'll be the talk Of
every garrison in the army, and if she
refuses me again they'll all say that it
was | who didn't come up to the
scratch"
The soliloquy was interrupted by a
roar of artillery, volleys of musketry,
huzzas. Then the bugler sounded a re-
call. The battle was over.
'"This corpse" remarked the colonel,
rising, "goes to quarters. Tonight he
goes to receive the surrender"
Taps was sounding when the colonel
rang at General Pertle's quarters. He
called for Miss Rosamond, and after
considerable delay the lady came down.
"Rosamond," he said, pardon me for
coming to you again after having been
so lately refused for the sixth time'-
"The sixtieth, you mean," she said,
tapping "her silken sandaled foot" on
the rug.
at will be the six hundredth before
l give you up"
Doubtless your boldness this even
ing comes from that ridiculous mistake
which occurred on the field today"
What mistake"
| Don't tell me that you didn't hear
She hesitated.
do the dead hearw
'They certainly do not snore."
"Well, then, do those who snore
hear?"
"You had ceased to snore when l.
when the lieutenant colonel
"Never mind, Rosamond, what the
lieutenant colonel said. / have come
for the seventh time
"The sixty-tirst, you mean"
"Well, the sixty-frst time, to ask the
woman l love, the only woman have
ever loved or will ever
"Can't you change the form of your
proposal? You have used those words
tevery time"