West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1903-12-03
HlNSER, THE PILGRIM.


! may not be home before midnight. Al
least, you need not sis up for me-"
Is IL politics 2" qaeried Mrs. Bowser
''No. Got word to-day that had been
elected member of the Pilgrim Fa,hes'
club. and have go, TO show up tonight
and make ii,,le address. I've been run
ning thing. over in my mind all the after
noon. and guess can get of something
that will do"
as I, about The Pilgrin Fathers p
| sOf course.v
/ "iladn't you better outline TO me what
you arc going TO say Perhaps l could give
you some suggestions. You are apt to get
tangled up on history now aud then. you
know"
"oh, am, am I r'' replied Mr. Bowser,
as he bsistled up. "If you can mention
one single instance where have tangled up
In history. ancient or modern. Pii give you
S. gold piece You ksow Il all, Of course.
but II don't follow that all the rest OF US are
natural idiots"
swell you'll probably get through all
right" soothingiy observed Mrs. Bowser,
and she went upstairs to lay out his clothes
aud determined TO say no more on. the
subject.
Mr.. Bowser was disappointed. As a
matter Of fact he wasn't at all sure of his
position. aud he had Intended to ask several
questions and profit by the answers. His
dignity had been hurt, however, aud now
he couldn't get around to II. lie had dim
feeling that he had got the Mayflower,
Christopher Columbus and George Wash.
ingion more or less mixed up, and all the
time he was dressing he wished that he had
an hour 10 spare 10 eonsult the ency-
clopedia II Is now too late to get down
the book without Mrs. Bowser seeing Il and
asking further questions. aud he had let The
idea go. When he was ready 10 take his
departure Mrs. Bowscr said
ssyou know where the Pilgrim Fathers
landed, of course r'
''Madam, do know my own name \" he
asked IN reply, as he drew himself up aud
folded his arms aud fixed her with both his
eagle eyes
She had no further words, but the ca,
looked from one to the other and loudly
psrred that these'd be hot time Ia the old
Town that night. During his walk of half
mile to the club Mr.. Bowser thought Of
Plymouth Rock and Plymouth hens and
Plymouth squashes. Thoughts Of DE soto,
Cicero. Miles Siandish, Napoleon and the
Mayaower chased one another through his
brain. and when he arrived he was ia
state OF penpiraiiop. a friend who had
his best interests at hear, advised cham.
payne n Iibeesi quantities, end when the
time came for The newly elected Pilgrim TO
get up and speak he was feeling that he
had mortgage on the whole earth. and
that Mrs. Bowser didn't know beans from
brooms,icks. As to what followed I, is best
10 take his own story for IL.
A quarter Of an hour before midnight
Mrs. Bowser. who had felt that her services
would be required and had Not yet gone to
bed. heard someone fumbling and fussing at
the front door. She passed down the hall
and opened IL. and Mr.. Bowser somehow
got in without falling down. His gait
as he progressed toward The sitting soon,
was combination Of wobble aud
wizzY-wazzy. and he was real glad when he
finally brought up int front of his rocking
chair and managed TO drop into |, In heap
''weIl. yon are home again ~ said Mrs
Bowser with smile
''yesh, my dear, am home," he ihlckIy
replied, ''snd am happy TO shay that my
lizzie speech was great shackeess---a great
shsckcess, ! told you how Il would be, but
you thought would break down. Never
heard 50 much applause in al my life.
Some Of my friends think or,er take take
10 er lecture platform this winter"
~ am glad Of IL. and as it Is now mid.
night, let US goto bed. You can tell me
all the particulars 10 the morning"
''I3ut am goin' to tell all er particulars
now. might forget 'em by mornin'. II
was the speech of my life--of my life. and
you orser be proud Of me. ! brought down
er house as much as ten times. shometimes
they laughed. and shometimes they cried
Never shaw nozzing like is--never did,
'I,ut T'il hear all about il while We are At
breakfast OF course am proud Of You.
and Of course I want TO hear The full
details 4"
you'll hear all about 'em tonight and
right now" doggsdiy replied Nr. Bowssr.
as he brorgh, his rs, down on his knee. '1n
the 6fs, place, go, 10 er club Go, that
down p
"Yes."
Received royal welcome from all er
members. an Of EN- shaid would be er
honor to er club. Then got UP 70 speak.
Never felt cooler In my life --Didn't shiver
one shiyer That's er sort Of husband you
have got. Mrs Bowscr bot you don't know
ii--you don't know a. You jess think I'm
a cooper or blacksmith and that don't
know oratory from blackberrics
well you got Up and delivered your
address on the Pilgrim Fathers" she said
II did. Had applause the hfst thing.
hadn't hardly said that the lizzie band Of
true-hcafted men and women shalled
away from the shores of Egypt before there
was enthusiastic applause
Good land but you didn't say Egypti
'Of course ! did COURSE You don't
shnppose had EN- shall away from or
shores Of Africa do you1 vow would have
shaid 50 but didn't Ihey shaiod and
shailcd az hoaily landed IN Florida. That
brought more applause--lols of applause.
Shome men laughed tilI they had 70 hold
er sides
Mr.. Bowscr did you land those Pilgrim
Fathers N Flofida'' soismeiy asked Mrs
nowaar