davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14
An Embryo Journa1tst.

"Your boy" said the editor of the
Bowersville Clarion, has the making
of a real editor in him.
"Think sop said the pleased father.
Sure. Why, hehas handed in half a
dozen accounts of parties this season,
and in every one of them he stated
that "a delightful time was had >
Judge.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14
The widow,. Adyantare.

(Which would you rather be if you
were 81 and could have your choice, a
widow or just a girl?"
ooh, a widow, by all means. A widow
always has a big advantage. She can
try an entirely different kind the next
time. Chicago Record Herald.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14
where the DifficuIty Lax,

Boggs (facetiously)-Fourth daugh-
ter to be married, Ell? l fancy you've
had considerable difficulty in getting
SO large number of girls off your
hands.
Noggs (earnestly)-No, my dear
Boggs, the difficulty is in keeping such
a large number Ct husbands on their
feet.-Town Topics.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14
As others See Us.

Myer-You may make some people
believe that story, but I'm not such a
fool as / look,
Gyer-Well, why don't you stop trav-
cling around in disguise then?-Chica-
go Daily News.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14

stately pleasure dome" to arise. all
for the children. No steamer that
floated last summer was good enough
Happy Days." which has just been
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14
An Awful Jolt.

He (bashfully)-May I-ss-kiss
your baby sister?
She lin disgusD-Oh, l suppose So
if you're too cowardly to tackle girl
nearer your own size.-Chicago Daily
News.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14
Getting Old.

"She used to say no girl should mar
ry until she got an excellent proposal"
"And now?"
Now she's dropped the excellent :"
Philadelphia Press.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14
Rivalry.

New Yorker-They say New York is
the most corrupt city in the union.
Chicago Man (contemptuously)- 1t
doesn't compare with Chieago!--N Y.
Herald.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14

valuable a d v / c c
upon the conduct
of life he might
advise them t o
keep away from
gambling houses.
Asst O II j S Ii j II &
facts are brought
out by District At
torney j e r o m e.
L h a t "a g il e
smasher of illegal
privileges, s a y 3
there is hardly an
honest" G a M
=
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14
Sure Enough.

Church-There is waiter over in
our place named Scales.
Gotham-Ah! Expects every one to
tip him, suppose?-Yonkers States
man.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14
Harder to Fill.

He has six little mouths to feed
Which fact to labor hurries him;
But it's another hungry mouth
The furnace's-that worries him.
Cincinnati Commercial Tribune.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14
Punishment to Fit.

To fit his thleving hardihood,
His meanness small and rank,
The man who jumps his board bill should
Be made to walk the plank
.-PhiladelDhia Press.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14
Removed the Cauae.

Miss Ugliface-I could really never
be contented and happy in the room
you've given me.
Hotel Clerk-Oh, I'll fix that all
right. (To the bell boy)-Go up and
remove the mirror from the lady's
room.-Detroit Free Press.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14

"But, you see, only want the teapot
and the sugar basin. Don't you break
these sets?"
! mo, madam. We generally leave
that to the servants of our custom
ers."-Punch.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14
A Reasonab1e 1nfere nee.

81 have been everywhere" said
Diogenes, as he YEARLY set his lantern
down, land 1 haven't been able to find
an honest man. What do you think of
that?"
"It merely indicates" answered the
plain, everyday citizen, chat you
have an undesirable circle of acquain-
tanees." -Washington Star.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14

large degree deers from working beve
lessnes under all will initiate against the
strike.
AS have said many times, have abiding
people believe that when they understand be right they
will it, and without the support Of the people great
succeed That strike If
try sympathy with AND SURF. THE
SYMPATHY OF THE PEOPLE WILL NEVER BE WITH
THOSE WHO VIOLATE THE LAW.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14
There Is Progress In C0-Education
BY DIR. ANDREW SLOAN DRAPER,
President lllinol. State University.

[E power of woman not recognized as early as
that of man, and the education of the mass has
not yet become world policy. The reasons for
the historic evolution of the schools are obvious
Woman was for long time the supporter
and subordinate, the toy and task-bearer of man.
About the only rights our foremothers had was the
right to live and to be our foremothers. Indeed,
the law knew nothing of them beyond keeping their
marriage within the control of the king or the lord
Of the manor until they took the step which con-
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14
LAWL ESSNESS is LABOR'S FOE
By JOHN MITCHELL President United Nine Worke of America

want to say, as to the matter Of lawlessness dur
ing Strikes that before being president Of union be-
fore being member of union, l am American,
over and above everything else. believe that every
man should first be an American There is no man who
would condemn awessness stronger than | would.
If did not do it because was opposed to lawless-
ness would do it because it initiates against the sue
of strike and against the success and advance
ment of labor organizations. | do not believe law
lessness ever won strike. do not believe lawess-
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14
A Scarce Article,

Bunker see they are thinking of
starting club in opposition to the
Authors club. It's to be composed en-
tirely of those who haven't written
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14

Will there ever be another gentle
man of the old school" like Peer
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14

She-Tom, dear, before I get you
your birthday present l want you to
tell me how much you can afford to pay
for it.--N. Y. Times.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14

Hill-Umph. They'll have hard
work to get any mem bers.-N. Y. Her
aid
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14
MR.. schwnn.s "Hnppx pax..,

The modern millionaire must do
good by main strength, as it We're. He
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1903-02-14
"a portrnlt OF n Gentlemnn.,

There are not few men in New
York who, like Marie, as types better
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1903-09-04
WHEN / WENT FISHING. j"
Carolina Ministers and Others Tell Some
Tall Tales.

"When l was fishing in the Arkansas
bayou" said Rev. DIR. j. R. Howerton,
II saw fish who was so game and
bold that he jumped up in the air and
bit off two feet of my fishing line"
"When DR.. Woods, an eminent di
vine, was fishing somewhere or other, !"
said Rev. DR.. John W. Stagg, ''hs tried
to pass bis wife's spectacles to her
across a small stream by fastening the
glasses to the end of his fishing line.
An immense fish jumped out of the
water and was caught by the rims of
the spectacles. When he was drawn
out OF the water the spectacles were
pulled across bis face and he was gaz-
ing reproachfully through Mrs. Woods
spectacles.
when / was down in Mississippi"
said Gen. r. A. Lee, 81 struck lot of
fish that were so sporty that all you
had to do was to rock boat and they
would jump into it and catch them
selves"
"In the Pigeon river in this State, "
said DR.. Howerton. with grim determi-
nation writ on his face, ''a man was
fishing and he used as sinker big
bullet that came from a Revolutionary
battlefield. A large fish caught hold
of his hook and pulled so hard that
when the hook came out of his gills the
bullet flew back and fractured the
mans skull"
Eyes, that's 3d." said Mr. w. l..
Long. "And the men who live close to
that same river catch fish in the most
modern way. They no longer use a
hook and line, but they lie down by the
side of the stream with rifles in their
hands and when the fish-big, fierce
fine fish they are-jump into the all
they shoot 'em with rifle. call that
fishing some"
81 pass" said Col. Jeems HOWE
with a sigh.-Charlotte IN. C.) Observ'
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1903-09-04
N 0 R P H | N E
Opium, Whiskey and All
Drug Habits
Cured Without Pain at Your Homes
THE BEST OF SANATORlUM FACILI
TIES IF DESIRED.

lfyou are addicted to these habits you
think YOU will quit it. You won't: you
can't unaided; but you can be cured and
restored to your former b salth and vigOr
without pain or the loss of an hour from
YOUR business at moderate cost. The
medicine builds up your health, restores
yonr nervous system to Its normal condi-
ton; you feel like q different person from
the beginning of treatment. LEAVING
OFF THE OPIATES AFTER THE FIRST
DOSE. You will soon be convinced and
fully satisfied In your own mind that you
will be cured.
MI. T. M. Brown, of DeQueen, Ark :,
says: lover years ago was cured OF the
opium habit by your medicine, and have
continued in the very best of health since"
DR.. w. M. Tunstall, of LOvingston.. Va .
SAYS: Il am glad to say that l firmly be-
lieve that am entirely and permanently
cured of the Drink Habit, as have never
even 80 much as wanted drink in any
form since took your eradicatOr, now IL
months ago. 1t was the best dollars
ever invested"
Mrs, Virginia Townsend, OF Shreveport,
La, writes: "No more OpiuW. have taken
no other remedy than yours and make no
mistake when say that my health is bet
ter now than it ever was in my life, and |
owe it to you and your remedy, 1t has
been twelve years since l was cured by
your treatment"
For full particulars address DR.. B. M
WOolley, 301 Lowndes Bldg. Atlanta. Ga,
who will send you his book on these dis
eases FREE. sep 4-l2t lem
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1903-09-04
Not The Only One.
THERE ARE HUNDREDS OF STAUNTON
PEOPLE SIMILARLY SITUATED.

Can there be any stronger proof Off
cred than the evidence OF Staunton
residents9 After you have read the
following, quietly answer the question.
r. II. Smith, of BAL Halle st., we'll
known clerk in Thos. r. Blackburn g
grocery, says: II feel that it is my
duty to state publicly how much good
Doan's Kidney Pills did for me. was
a sufferer for two years with kidney
and bladder troubles. There was q
constant pain over my left kidney and
side and over the bladder. l could
only walk short way without having
to sit down and rest, and at times the
pain came on 80 severe that it made me
sick at my stomach and caused me to
vOmit. frequently passed gravel,
and everyone who has suffered from
these pains known what tOreure it is.
The kidney secretions were irregular,
highly c0lored and scalded. believ I
tried all the medicines on the market
that were recommended for kidney
relief. was under tbs care of sOme
of the best physicians but they were
unable to help me. Finally heard OF
Doan 8 Kidney Pills and got box at
3. F. Hughes drug store. l did not
have much faith in them before l be
gan the treatment, but after taking
only a few doses, to my surprise
found they were giving me great re.
lief. By the time l had used the one
box felt like new man for I had
been benefited every way. Doan's
Kidney Pills cured me, and think
them the most wonderful remedy or
earth"
| For sale by all dealers. Prce SOC
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
sole agents for the United States.
Remember the name-DoAN's-an
| take no substitute.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1903-09-04
SmithfeId Hams,

"a hog is a hog" is an old saying.
but some hogs are sweeter than others.
The most repulsive brutes of the scrub
oak forest and the most expensive are
the most attractive on the table. While
the bacon of the sleek, fat porker of
commerce pleases the general eater at
10 cents to IS cents pound for its
cured ham. the hams from the old Vir-
GINA razor back breed are commanding
so cents pound. There ls something
inherent in the breed and its surround
ings that sweetens and enhances this
peculiar porcine product from "ole
Virginny." While many know this ia
nous, but limited product, few know
the history of the razorback Wand.
In her colonial days Virginia was
ambitious. Charles H., when exiled
from bis throne, was invited by the
people of Virginia. through her Gov
ernor, Sir William Berkeley, to come
over and rule her people. The King
couldn't do 1t, but he showed his ap.
probation of this loyalty by bestowing
on the colony it's present title. "Old
Dominion. It's accompanying seal
read, "En dat Virginia quintum,"
which in plain English means, "ses |
Virginia yields the fifth kingdom"
England, Scotland, Ireland and France
constituted the four others. Howe
says of that era:
Hogs, swarming like vermin, ran
at large in troops. It was the best
poor man g country in the world. These
wild hogs were the principal food of
the new settlers as we'll as of the In
dams, because they were available all
the year around, and were more easily
got than the water fowl that enlivened
the morasses, the game in the forest or
the covies of quail and wild turkeys
which rustled in the wood. The early
settlers preferred their Indian pork to
any other, and stuck to it.n
The razorback hog hung around I'M
til late years, developed the aristocratic
purse and with it the aristocratic taste
for gamy pork product. Then the
hog with the keel on top and the tooth.
pick nose rooted to the front and COM
manded three times as much for his
ham and bacon as the best bred hog
could get. The oldest inhabitant be.
gan to think back and to remember
that the Indians had cure for their
meats which they carried on their
nomadic trips. The old Indian process
of curing pork was finally worked out
some years ago, with the aid of the
Indians who still remains. This secret
applied to the peculiar meat Of the
largely fed on nuts, has
produced the ham and bacon which |
made Virginia famous for her exclu-
sive product, which outrivals even the
Yorkshire and Westphalis products. !
The only trouble is that the output is
limited by the number of available |
hogs and by the fact that the real In
1ian method of curing is not general
" known. Like all rare products, the
Virginia ham has lot of limitations,
but the real product is unrivaled.
New York Tribune.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1903-09-04

CONNECTIONS.
Train No. connects at HarrisOnburg,
Va. chesapeake Western Junction) with
Valley r. r trains for all points in the
Valley. North or South of Harrisonburg
and for points South or North via Southern
Ry. or Valley r. R., and Harper's Ferry,
B. & o.; also via StauntOn, Va, G. 81 o.
Train No. connect at Elkton, Va, with
N. & W. train No. for ali points South,
Southwest and Northwest, via Roanoke,
Va, Winston Salem, N. c., Bristol, Tenn,
or Columbus. Ohio.
Train No. 6 connects at ElktOn, Va, with
N. & w. train No. for Luray. Front Roy
al, RiyertOn, Va, Charlestown, w. Va,
Hagerstown, Md, and points North and
East via Hagerstown, Md. and Cumber-
land Valley and Western Maryland K. Rs.
Pullman Buffet Sleeping carsthrOugh from
Elkton to New York, via Harrisburg and
Philadelphia. Pa.
Train No. will wait at Elkton for N.
q W. No. 4 connection, 80 minutes when
late.
For information as to rates, Tickets,
routes, etc., apply to any agent of the
Chesapeake Western Railway, or
E. w. Jackson, M L. Mardis,
Gen. Supt. Supt & Traffic Mel
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1903-09-04
What is Life Z

In the last analysis nobody knows.
but we do know that it is under strict
law. Abuse that law even slightly,
pain results. Irregular living means
arrangement of the organs, resulting
in constipation, headache or liver
trouble. DR.. Kings New Life Pills
quickly re-adjusts this. It's gentle,
yet thorough. Only 26c at Hughes
drug store.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1903-09-04

Accidents will happen. Be ready
with Victor Liniment. Its the great
Bone and Nerve cure for cuts, bruises,
sprains, rheumatism, etc.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1903-09-04
An Old Friend in New Garb.

Our SEXTON was married the other
day"
II suppose he went and tolled the
BELL"
Mot exactly. He simply gave the
belle a ring. cleveland Plain Dealer.
Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1903-04-17
WEST 6RATTLEeoRo.

Allen Worthington has finished work
for Charles Davis. He will have emnIov'
ment in the East village.
Paul Devine, who lived in Charles
Miners house which was burned on Mel
rose street recently, has moved to Iowa
farming. III
;, A petition is In circulation asking the
cense for the sale of Intoxicating liouors
TO the Melrose House. The application
OF Mr. Sargent, proprietor of the house
was for third class license. to sell beer
and light wines. S'
Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1903-04-17

The bailiffs and board of civil au-
thority will meet in the Office of Ba-
con & Hooker Saturday evening,
May 2, at 1880 o'clock to revise the
check list to be used at the annual
village meeting May 5. No names
will be added to the list after May q
An African lily, rare and handsome
specimen, is on exhibition in one Of
Houghton & Simonds's store windows.
1t is about four feet tall and there are
three blossoms and five buds on a
stalk which starts near the base of the
plant. 1t is owned by Miss Helen
Chandler
The International Sunshine society,
Brattleboro branch /, will hold a bag
sale at the home of Mrs. julius ].
Estey Thursday evening, April 30, at
z o'clock. At that time the national
president, Mrs. Cynthia Westover AL
den of New York city, will be present
and will speak on sunshine work.
Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1903-04-17
Letter to Retting Brothers,

Dear Sir: There are two sorts of furniture
You know both; for you sell'em both. One
SORT looks better than it is. and the other is
better Il a. it looks. There isn't any other
sort.
Tine sauc. two sorts of paint. no more: and
we make 'em hnth we make tons of stuff that
isn't worth its freight. rclongs to the bust
ness-haNc TO- Belongs To your business-yOu
h I'VE to.
But this is aside. We put into cans, with our
name on, the vera lest paint there il. in the
world: Devoe cad and Zinc. II takes fewer
gallons than mike paints, and il wears twice
as long rs lead AMI oh
&. o. Brown Bro Columbia $ G., write:
Mr.. C.. y. Brown nploNed an experienced
painter to paint his house with Deyoe Lead
ana Zinc. The puinter, un seeing the paint
that was sent To the house, said That there was
NOT enough; he was so sure of This thar he
opened up all except one tiNe-gallOn kit.
When he job was done he returned the five
gallon Kit and about rs much more in open
vessels. Other painters who have been using
mixed paints have had the same experience
with DeVoe edd and Zinc.
Yours truly,
...t +. w. DENOE L. co,
New York.
P.S. Rob'ins 4 Cowles sell our paints.
Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1903-04-17

ANY CHURCH or parsonage or
institution supported by voluntary
contribution will be given a lib
eral quantity of the Longman &
Martinez Pure Paints whenever
they paint.
Note: Have done SO for twenty
seven years. Sales: tens of mil
lions of gallons; painted nearly
two million houses under guar
antee to repaint if not satisfactory
The paint wears for periods up to
eighteen years. Linseed Oil must
be added to the paint (done in two
minutes). Actual cost then about
$l.25 a gallon. Samples free.
Sold by our agents, Robbins &
Cowles, Brattleboro; M. G. Will
liams, Putney.
Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1903-04-17
Gard Of Thanks.

nS Inn marlborough and his parents, Mr..
anu mrs; Thomas Marlborough. wish to
a. their sincere thanks to all those
Re,i Saatons River, Putney. Brattleboro,
who hav ans and neighboring towns
words of sympathy and other helm. TO
'esr the burden of his recent misfortune.
'"A'ohs River, April, 10, 1903.
Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1903-04-17
Gard of Thanks

thanl wish N tins way to express our heartfelt
have helned dn e. friends who, by their kindness,
aeSr wife and mother, Also for the beautiful
when efI ike May each of them find as true friends
=, P. BARNES, "'"0s'
Mh; AND MRS. LOUIS E. BARNES.
WILLIS +. BARNES,
brattleboro, VT, April i5.
Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1903-04-17
Gbe l)ermunt pbenis.
Announcements.

Diaries. Almanacs and Register for 1903 at
Clapp & Joness.
Last call on the Seed Oats, we have 1900 bu.
car just arrived, very nice. t. CROSBY Co.
Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1903-04-17
Women's Tailored Suits.

Returned yesterday from the city,
where | made careful selections of the
latest styles in women's tailored suits,
separate skirts, taffeta and peau de sole
silk coats, exquisite styles in neck wear,
shirt waists, dress goods and trimmings.
Miss McMennimen, 8 Flat street.
Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1903-04-17
A Card.

ana Wish i, IN this way TO express TO the friends
s S1nanesses and their sympathy in my time OF
brattleboro, April II, 1903. N LIN
Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1903-04-17

He has started publishing a paper for
BARRIERS, you know" "Ah! suppose IT'S
very appropriately illustrated with cuts"
philadelphia Press.
Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1903-04-17
Hoods JdrSdpdriiid
and Pills

Remove all humors, overcome all
their effects, strengthen, tone and
invigorato the whole system.
~ had salt rheum on my hands so that l
could not work. took Hoods Sarsaparilla
and it drove out the humor. l continued
its use till the sores disappeared" MRS.
IRA o. BROWN, Rumford Falls, Me.
Hoods Sarsaparilla promises to
cure and keeps the promise.
Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1903-04-17

Boys playing with a gun at West
Charlestown Wednesday accidentally dis
charged 1t and the ball entered the eye
of Elmer. 6, son of Charles Powers. and
passed entirely through the head. The
boy is alive.
Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1903-04-17

A mans wife should always be the
same. especially to her husband, but il
she is weak and nervous. and uses Car
ter's Iron Pills, she cannot be, for they
make her feel like a different person.
so they all say. and their husbands say
Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1903-04-17
P.s. Robbins 4 Cowles sell our paints

A mans wife should always be the
same. especially to her husband, but II
she is weak and nervous, and uses Car
make her feel like a different person, !
so they all say, and their husbands say
so too!
Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1903-04-17

wo nIaesieooro lodge. No. 1902, f. & A. M.
last evening. "es'NS
Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1903-04-17
AH Hun7OrS.

Are impure matters which the skin,
liver, kidneys and other organs can
not take care of without help, there is
such an accumulation of them.
They litter the whole system.
Pimples, boils, eczema and other
eruptions, loss of appetite, that tired
feeling, bilious turns, fits of indiges-
ton, dull headaches and many other
troubles are due to them.