davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1903-08-15

Denver Times.
William Thaw, the wealthy Pittsburg
nan whose chief occupation in life is to
spend money and who created an interna-
tional sensation a few weeks ago by re-
fusing to appear at the wedding of his
sister to the Earl of Yarmouth, spent yes
terday in seeing Denver. 1t is said that
he saw il inside and out. Last night he
left in the same style in which he had
viewed the Western metropolis. His time
here had been overstayed and he wanted
to reach California as soon as possible.
He at once chartered from the Union Pa
cific a private Pullman and paid $3.50 spot
cash TO use ii seven days. He then pur-
chased eighteen tickets at $40 each to San
Francisco in order to lave the exclusive
use of the car. When he paid out 5000
In cold cash he went on board, took his
seat and notified his private secretary not
to let any one take his picture for the pa
pers. The only person on board beside
himself was III. Harvey Hill, his private
secretary.
1t is said that he spent money lavishly
while in Denver. AT one place he left 500
for hackdrivers, elevator boys, porters and
walters, who thought Morgan or and
bilt had struck town.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1903-08-15

body and one on the Jaw. He repeatedly
stabbed Jeffries on the mouth with lefts.
Corbett's left cheek showed a lump from
one of Jeffries's close-arm blows. Jeffries
had a similar mark. Jeffries hooked left
to the body and the referee had trouble in
separating them. AT the close Corbert
stabbed Jeffries's mouth with his left three
times. but they were weak efforts.
Round 10-Jeffries stood straight up and
came at his man without hesitation. Cor
bett seemed to be making a waiting fight.
They exchanged lefts to the face and jeff
ries made a vicious effort. Jeffries sent a
left hook to the stomach and Corbett went
down for nine econd He got up and re-
ceived a left in the stomach and right on
the jaw. He went down and after the
count of seven Tommy Ryan threw up the
sponge. Corbett was suffering pain and a
chair was brought for him. After a minutes
rest he recovered and got up and shook
hands with Jeffries.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1903-08-15

securing oil leases in indiana and Kansas,
which in addition to the oil property in
Wyoming will make a valuable and produc-
tive investment. Gonser knew that, so he
had no cause for worry.
"Gonser had been having an uphill pull
Of 1T for several weeks and he owed a little
money, notes of 800 or $50, amounting in
all not to exceed $50 or $1,000. He was not
being pressed for any of this, so far as l
can learn, and If he had been it would not
have been difficult for him to raise the
money, for he had scores of friends who
would gladly come to his assistance. 1 be-
lieve he was insane and that his mental
condition was due to his sickness while in
Mexico. / met him here four or five weeks
ago and had a long talk with him, and at
that time / noticed there was something
peculiar about his manner, especially in the
expression about his eyes. / haven't the
slightest doubt but that he has been grad
ually but surely losing his mind for
months"
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1903-08-15
GREEK Met GREEK
AND WAR WAS ON BETWEEN PED
Oilers ON sTATEHOUsE LAWN.
Police Arrived in Time to Arrest Seven
Men Whose Names ParaIyzed
h Turnkey.

A free-for-all fight among a number
of Greek peddlers attracted a large
crowd around the grounds of the
Statehouse last night. Clubs and sticks
were used regardless of consequence
until the police arrived. The fight
started over an argument as to which ped
died was entitled to sell on the corner OF
Senate avenue and Washington street, and
in a moment a war was begun.
The ish started in the street, but as there
was scarcely enough room to conduct the
fracas properly ii was transferred TO the
yard of the State house.
Bicyclemen Askins and Duncan and Pa
trolmen Gunsolus. Shafer and Dugan were
soon i'm the midst of the fray and as a re-
suit Nick Poulakos, Nick Merianos, AL Car
ri. Peter Paulakos, Peter Goranitos, John
Nicholas and Straits Stamatakos were
lodged behind the bars at the police station
on charges of assault and battery and dis
turbipg the peace.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1903-08-15

Maggie Bruce, the colored girl who de-
serted her infant child at the Claypool
Hotel. was fined $50 and costs, the limit
allowed by law. by Judge whallon. of the
city Police Court yesterday morning and
was given an additional thirty DAYS i'm the
~workhousu for good measure.
She said that her older baby was in the
charge of sr sister at "a Lincoln lane. and
refused TO urn IL over TO the authorities of
the orphana home at the suggestion of the
court. but / Is probable that the child will
be taken from her by the authorities.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1903-08-15
Results at New Castle.

Special to the indianapolis Journal.
NEW CASTLE, Ind, Aug. H--To-day
closed the New Castle fair, one unprece-
denied in size in the history of Henry coun-
ty. The race summaries:
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1903-08-15

z:IZ IrOt, purse SZU.
Zelma, br. m. (Weeks) ..............1 / !
James B. Duke (Commons) ....-....-..3 3dr
Time-2:21A, 2:26, 2:21.
2:25 Pace, purse $500:
Lazaar, br. m. (Osborn) ..........1 2 I 1
Camper boy, b. g. (Clel Maple)....2 3 4 3
Frank Coaster, b. g. (McGrady) % 1 2 4
Dick WEIGH CWeeks) ..............6 5 3 2
Red Boy (Roe WorD ...............4 4 DIS
Lady Guyson Games DavilD ~ DIR
King Royal q. Davis) ..............5 DIR
Time-2:2O, PISA. 2:14%, 2:14h.
Lazaar broke a former record of 2:17A in
the above race and was said by all to have
been easily good for 2:l2.
Half mile run; purse $50:
Snowden (Pelcher) 8
Mary Hunt (B%ronenberg) .............3 2
Time-:502, :52z.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1903-08-15

COrbett's Record.
Born at San Francisco. Cal. Sept. /, 1856
Hight, 6 feet / inch.
Ring Record
1857. draw with Jack Burke, eight rounds
1889. draw with Frank Glover, three
rounds.
1889. won from Joe Choynski. four rounds
1889. knocked out Joe Choynski, twenty
seven und
1859. draw with Dave Campbell, ter
rounds.
1890, won from Jake Kilrain. six rounds
1890, won from Dominick McCaffrey, -four
rounds.
1890, exhibition with Mike Donovan, three
rounds.
1891. won from Ed Kinney. four rounds.
1891, draw with Peter Jackson, sixty-one
rounds.
1891, exhibition with John l. Sullivan.
four rounds.
1891. exhibition with Jim Hall. four
rounds.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1903-08-15

Born at Carroll, o., 1875, Hight 6 feet ~
inches.
Ring Record.
July 2, 1896, knocked out Dan Long, two
rounds
two rounds.
May IS. 1897, knocked out Henry Baker,
nine rounds.
July 16, 1897, draw, Gus Rubin, twenty
rounds.
Nov. 20. 1897. draw, Joe Choynski. twenty
rounds.
Feb. %, 1898. won, Joe Goddard, four
rounds.
March q, 1898, won, Peter Jackson, three
rounds
April %, 1898. won, Peter Everett. three
rounds
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1903-08-15
Fade Away.

Feb. is, 1892. won from Bill Spillings at
New York, one ound.
Feb. Is, 1892. won from Bob Caffrey at
New York, one round.
Sept. z. 1892, won. John L.. Sullivan.
worlds championship, twenty-one rounds.
Jan. Is, 1894, X. o. Charley Mitchell.
worlds championship, three rounds.
Sept. Z, 1894, X. o. Peter Courtney, six
rounds.
Nov. %. 1895. lost TO Tom Sharkey, foul.
nine rounds.
March IL, 1897, lost to Bob Fitzsimmons.
worlds championship, fourteen rounds.
1896. exhibition with Jim McVey. three
rounds.
June. 1896. draw. Tom sharkey. four
rounds.
1900. X. o. by Jim Jeffries. twenty-three
rounds.
Aug. 80. 1900, knocked out Kid Mccoy.
New York. five rounds.
Aug. IA, 1905. lost 10 James J. Jeffries
worlds championship. ten rounds.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1903-08-15

May 6, 1898, won, Tom Sharkey. twenty
rounds.
Aug. 5, 1898, won, Bob Armstrong, ten
rounds.
June 9. 1893, knocked out Bob Fitzsim-
mons, worlds championship. eleven rounds.
Nov. 3. 1899, won. Tom Sharkey, worlds
championship, twenty-five rounds.
April 6, 1900, knocked out Jack Finnegan,
one round.
May 1, 1900, knocked out Jim Corbett,
worlds championship % rounds.
Sept. II, 1901, won. Hank Griffin, four
rounds.
Sept. "a, 1901, knocked out Joe Kennedy,
two rounds.
Nov. 10, 1901, won. Gus Rubin, worlds
championship, five rounds
July %, 1902, knocked out Bob Fitzsim-
mons, worlds championship, eight rounds.
Aug. IA. 1903, knocked out James ]. Cor
bett, worlds championship, ten rounds.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1903-08-15
DOherty Beats Larned.

SOUTHAMPTON, l.. l., Aug. 14-H. L..
Doherty, the English tennis champion, de-
feated William A. Larned, the American
champion, to-day in the final match of the
singles on the courts of the Meadow Club.
The victory was won In three straight sets
by the score of 6-1, GO, 6-1.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1903-08-15
FRANKLIN IS HOPEFUL
COLLEGE FOOTBALL TEAM EXPECTS
TO MAKE GOOD RECORD.
Attorney S. Il. Ruick, of indianapolis,
Has Been Secured as Coach-The
Schedule for the Season.
Special to the Indianapolis Journal.

Special to the Indianapolis Journal.
FRANKLIN. Ind, Aug. 1.-THE pros
poets for a brilliant seasons record for the
Franklin College football team are very fiat
tering. The coach committee has secured
the services of S. K. Ruick, Of Indianapolis.
Mr.. Ruick has coached the Franklin team
before, and will come to Franklin this fall
already somewhat acquainted with the sit
uation. He is a rising young attorney of the
capital city, but continues to be a great foot
ball enthusiast. He made a fine record on
the De PAW team a few years ago, and
distinguished himself later at Yale. The
Franklin team this fall gives promise of be-
ing the strongest team of recent years.
Among the old players who will return are
Captain Mark Webb, Branigan, Miller,
Roach brothers, Pritchard, Luyster, Mat
thews, Webb S%purgeon, Dewing, Thompson,
Bryan and Silver. There will also be con-
siderable new material. men who have had
experience and success on high-school
teams. The seasons schedule, as already
arranged by Manager A. B. Hall, is as fol-
lows:
Oct. 3-Purdue at Lafayette.
Oct 10-Shortridge at Franklin.
Oct. 16-Hanover at Franklin
Oct. &c. C. of p. and S. at Franklin.
Oct. 24-Earlham at Richmond.
Oct. 31-Wabash at Charlottesville.
Nov. Rose Polytechnic at Franklin.
Nov. 13-Hanover at Hanover.
Nov. 16-Butler at Franklin.
The college campus presents a lively scene
this vacation. The new library building in
the southwest corner of the campus is go
ing up, while the older buildings are be-
ing thoroughly remodeled. modernized and
beautifed at a cost of about $40. 200. When
college will open on Oct. 1 it will be with
an equipment far in advance of anything
it has heretofore enjoyed. The prospect
for an enlarged attendance this fall is also
very encouraging. Altogether F~ranklin's
future seems very bright.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1903-08-15
SUMMER RESORTS.
THE CARLSBAD OF AMERICA

The new West baden springs Hotel At West
UNIQUE hotel in the weird. open Throughout the
year. Cost, with furnishings. 49, o0 Ameu-
can and European plans Contains .S rooma.
with private baths and all modern conveniences-
TIE ONLY FIREPRooF HOTEL IN WEST
BADEN FRENCH LICK VALLEY
Physicians prescribe West Baden waters AZ
the best curative agents known for all ailments
OF the stomach. liver and kidneys. Including
rheumatism and catarrhal troubles. For par
ticuiars address WEST BADEN SPRINGS CO.
West Baden. Ind.
Las Vegas daily optic. [volume] (Las Vegas, N.M.) 1880-1908, 1903-07-18
Maximum speed Of Automobiles.

M6xImum SPe0o " Rus0Itops'ess
In the automobile race In Ireland
the winning machine made a run OF
1858 miles at a sustained speed OF sixty
miles an hour. For q part Of the dis
lance the speed was s~ixty-eight miles
an hour. At the annual meet of the
Columbus, Ohio, automobile club
July 1, one machine made ten miles
In nine minutes and hfty-ive seconds.
In Ireland the highest speed was a
mile In fifty-three seconds.
The automobile has been In use
only a few years, yet 1t has achieved
a speed for long distances equal to
that OF our fast railway trains. Our
railway constructors and engineers
have given fifty years Of study and ex-
pertinent to the work Of increasing
the speed Of passenger and mall
trains. Tracks have been improved
with speed In mind. Cars have been
built and wheels modelled to reduce
the time between distant stations.
At first the highest ambition Of the
railway engineer was to run a mile
a minute. But as early al 1882 loco
motives were built In the United
States with a speed Of seventy miles
an hour, and four years later a train
on the New York Central made q run
Of 147 miles at a speed OF sixty-fve
miles an hour and q run Of ten miles
at a speed Of se~venty-fve miles an
hour.
In 1891 a train ran from New York
to Buffalo, 1876 miles, at a sustained
speed Of 6t.56 miles an hour, and In
the worlds fair year Of 1893 a train
was given the speed Of a mile in thir-
ty-two seconds, OF 112 miles an hour.
Since that time trains have main.
tained a speed Of ninety miles an hour
for considerable distances. If the au-
tomobilo. after only a few years Of OK
pertinent, can be given on ordinary
roads a speed Of sixty-elght miles an
hour, what may be done with automo-
biles specially constructed for speed
on specially constructed roadways?
Naval constructors have been work
ing for q generation to increase the
speed Of war vessels. The fastest
battleship has q speed Of less than
twenty miles an hour, u fastest
cruiser a speed Of twenty-five miles an
hour. and our fastest torpedo boat q
speed OF thlrty-four miles. The auto
mobiles In the race In Ireland were
driven forward at a speed four times
as great as that Of the Oregon In her
famous voyage around the continent,
and two and a half times as great as
the speed of the cruiser Brooklyn
at her best.
Las Vegas daily optic. [volume] (Las Vegas, N.M.) 1880-1908, 1903-07-18
LAND scRtP

BY the use Of so-called land scrip
title can be obtained to government
land without cultivation or residence
thereon. All you need to do is to give
description and show the land to be
Of the proper kind; we do the rest. BY
reason OF the exhaustion of the supply
which has been quite limited the price
10 advancing. We have a small amount
yet on hand to sell, that Is fully guar
anteed. We also deal In real estate,
loans and investments.
HUGO SEABURG,
7-89-4mo. Springer, N. M.
Las Vegas daily optic. [volume] (Las Vegas, N.M.) 1880-1908, 1903-07-18
NOTICE.

NOJIVEs
Notice is hereby given, that the
partnership lately existing between
us, the undersigned J. G. Wagner and
G. F. Myers, carrying on a general
hardware business at Las Vegas, N.
NJ, under the firm name Of Wagner
& Myers, has this day been dissolved
by mutual consent. All persons In
debted to said firm will pay said C.
F. Myers who has paid and discharged
all debts and liabilities Of said Arm.
Dated July 15, A. D. 1903.
J. G.. WAGNER,
c. F. MYERS.
7-104-6.
Las Vegas daily optic. [volume] (Las Vegas, N.M.) 1880-1908, 1903-07-18

Cattle Shipments-Livc Stock In
spector Samuel Locke OF Magdalena
reports that two big shipments OF cat
tie will leave Magdalena for Denver
before the 25th. One train load goes
TO Denver. shipped to II. NJ. Porter.
Denver representative Of the Red
River cattle company. Another train
load Is scheduled to 70 TO Denver. the
shipper being Mr.. Williams. OF Mag.
dalena.
Las Vegas daily optic. [volume] (Las Vegas, N.M.) 1880-1908, 1903-07-18

A movement has been started in
France to decrease the infantile death
rate SO as to provide the requisite
number Of troops for the army" BY
the way. which Is the better way, to
let the baby die while In swaddling
clothes or to have It grow up to be
shot?
Las Vegas daily optic. [volume] (Las Vegas, N.M.) 1880-1908, 1903-07-18

The present position Of Europe
seems to be that Turkey Is not to be
allowed to fatten herself even II she
should win a war.
Las Vegas daily optic. [volume] (Las Vegas, N.M.) 1880-1908, 1903-07-18

The German minister OF war has re-
signed because he was criticized by
outsiders. II is very evident that he
didn't have the true oface-holding
spirit.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1903-12-31
A Weman's Complexion.

1t is rank foolishness to attempt
to remove sallowness or greasiness
of the skin by the use of cosmetics,
or local treatment, as advocated
by the beauty doctors. The only
safe and sure way that woman can
improve her complexion is by purify
ing and enriching the blood, which
can only be accomplished by keeping
the liver healthy and active. The
liver is the seat Of disease and blood
pollution. Green's August Flower
acts directly on the liver, cleanses
and enriches the blosd, purifies the
complexion. 1t also cures consti-.
patton, biliousness, nervousness, and
induces refreshing sleep. A single
bottle of, August Flower has been
known to cure the most pronounced
and distressing case of dyspepsia
and digestion. New trial size bottle
% cents; regular size rs cents. AT
Frost & Spies.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1903-12-31
GETTING Rid of His Horses.

Probably no man ever loved a
horse more than did the late Will
liam B. Smith of Hartford, Conn,
owner OF the stallion Thomas JEFF
ferson, one of the best proportional
pieces of horsefesh of his time. De-
probation in real estate values
caused the horseman's affairs to be-
come unsettled, and be failed. While
driving with clergyman, the Rev.
Joseph Waite, in the troublous
times he expressed his sorrow at
having to part with number of
promising horses.
SLOW many head have your"
asked the clergyman.
"Fifteen," replied Mr.. Smith.
Later the Rev. Mr.. Waite met Mr.
Smith and asked him if he had sold
any of his circuit racing horses.
"Oh, yes; got rid of most of
them and have bought colt or two
since"
GLOW many horses have you
now? ?" inquired the clergyman.
"Only twenty-five" replied Mr..
Smith.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1903-12-31
A Toothless Animal.

In a lesson on the animal king
dom the teacher put the following
question:
"Can any boy name to me an ami
NAL of the order indentata-that is,
a toothless animal?"
A boy whose face beamed with
pleasure at the prospect of good
mark replied:
81 can"
"Well, what is the animal -
'My grandmotherp replied the
boy In great glee.-Exchange.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1903-12-31
Giant Umbrellas.

An African chiefs umbrella is of
greater Importance than many peo-
pie imagine apart from its enor-
nous size. It's loss in battle more
than equals the loss of standard
of a European commander. Some
Of the umbrellas are of prodigious
dimensions, being NO less than IS
feet in diameter, with ribs 10 feet 6
inches long. They are made of
Lakewood, and the covering is of
gorgeously colored chintz in varied
sections of crimson, yellow and blue.
The opening is performed by means
of pulleys and ropes attached to the
runner" this operation requiring
the services of three or four men.
The pole, or handle, is of birch and
is about fourteen or fifteen feet
high.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1903-12-31
FAMILIAR CUSTOMS.
Things We Do That Had a Different
Significance Originally.

1t is most surprising what num-
Der of little things we do without
knowing the reason. Why, for in
stance, do widows wear caps? Per
haps you may say because they
make them look pretty and interest
ing. But the real reason is that
when the Romans were in England
they shaved their heads as a sign Of
mourning. Of course a woman
couldn't let herself be seen with a
bald head, so she made herself a
pretty cap. And now, though the
necessity of wearing it has passed
away, the cap remains, says Lon
don magazine.
What is the meaning Of the cross
es or KS on barrel of beer? They
signify degrees Of quality Sowa-
days. But originally they were put
on by the ancient monks as a sort of
trademark. They were crosses in
those days and meant a sort of oath
on the cross sworn by the manufac-
turer that his barrel contained good
liquor.
Why are bells tolled for the dead?
This has become so familiar a prac-
tice that a funeral without it would
appear un-Christian. Yet the rea-
son is quite barbarous. Bells were
tolled long ago when people were
being buried in order to brighten
away the evil spirits who lived in
the air.
Why do fair ladies break a bottle
of wine on the ship they are chris
tening? Merely another survival Of
barbaric custom. In the days Of sac
rifce to the gods it was customary
to get some poor victim when a boat
was being launched and to cut his
throat over the prov SO that his
blood baptized it.
Why are dignitaries deafened by
salute when they visit foreign
port? 1t seems a curious sort of
welcome, this firing off of guns, but
it appears the custom arose in a
very reasonable way. Originally a
town or war ship fired off it's
guns on the approach of important
and friendly strangers to show that
it had such faith in the visitors
peaceful intentions that it didn't
think it necessary to keep its guns
loaded.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1903-12-31

We would like to ask, throught
the columns of your paper, if there is
any person who has used Green's
August Flower for the cure of Indi-
gestion, Dyspepsia, and Liver
troubles that has not been ccured
and we also mean their results, such
as sour stomach, fermentation of
food, habitual costiveness. nervou
dyspepsia. headaches, respondent
feelings, sleeplessness-in fact, any
trouble connected with the stomach
or liver? This medicine has been
sold for many years in all civilized
ountries, and we wish to correspond
with you and send you,one of our
books free of cost. If you never
tried August Flower, try % cent
bottle first, We have never known
of it's failing. If so, something more
serious is the matter with You. The
% cent size has just been introduced
this year. Regular size IS cents. At
Frost & Spies. G.. G.sGreen,
Woodbury., N. J.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1903-12-31
Good For Children.

The pleasant to take and harmless
One Minute Cough Cure gives i'm
mediate relief in all cases of Cough,
Group and LaGrippe because it does
not pass Immediately into the stom-
ach, but takes effect right at the
seat of the trouble. 1t draws out
the Inflammation, heals and soothes
and cures permanently by enabling
the lungs to contribute pure life Civ
ing and LIES sustaining oxygen to the
blood and tissues. DR.. Armstrong
of Della, Tex. prescribes it daily and
says there is 70 better cough remedy
made. Sold by Fox Bros.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1903-12-31
NEW KIND or FISH.
Roscoe Thomas Captures Monster
Near Crisfield, Md.

Roscoe Thomas Captures Monster
Near CrisfieId, Md.
Roscoe Thomas, son of Joshua Thorn
as, of near Hopeweil, Md, while out
ducking in a small craft in Jones
creek, near Crisfield. Nd, saw large
fish trying to make its way through the
ice, says the Philadelphia Press. The
monster had got into the shoal water,
pinning itself between the ice and
the bottom, when Mr.. Thomas at
tention was attracted by the sudden
breaking of ice. He Immediately shot
it.
The fish weighed 125 pounds. 1t was
FIVE feet and one-half an inch long. 1t
has mouth like a crocodile, two rows
of large white teeth and a bill resem-
bling that Of duck. 1t was thought
at first to be herring hog, but since
has been discovered to be a different
kind Of a fish,
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1903-12-31
New Names For Pies.

"This pie is entirely too affection
att" complained the cheerful idiot
whats that?" asked the puzzled
waiter girl.
Il say it's too affectionate; the
upper crust is stuck on the lower.
Bring me some Of that drop stitch
pie over there"
And after some difficulty it was
beaten into the head of the dis
tressed maiden that he wanted some
Of the cranberry pie with the lattice
work cover.-Baltimore American.