Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1903-09-25
at Darley a-walkin' along the railroad

at Darley a-walkin' along the railroad
nigh the turnin' table, Whar they firt
engines round like children On fyin'
jimmy, when all at once big strappin'
feller with a red flag in his hand run
up an knocked me off'n the track ker-
whallop in q ditch. It was just in
time to keep me from bein' run over by
switch engine. He was as mad as
Tucker. 'Looky' heer,' ses he, did you
think that thing was playin' tag with
you an I'D tap you on the shoulder
an run an hide behind tree? Say,
amt you from Short Pine destrict, this
side O. the mountains? I told i'm he'd
guessed right, an he said, L lowed so,
fer thar amt no other spot on the
whirlin' globe that produces folks as
green as gourds.' Well, gentlemen,
that foored me. 1t was bad enough to
be jerked about like a rag doll, but it
was tough to heer my section jeered ut.
What makes you say that| I axed
i'm as I stood thar tryin' to git pas
sic O. wet glass out O. my hip pocket
without cuttin' my fingers. Laugh
ter. led by Pole Baker, who sensed the
meaning of the reference.] 'Beca'se,'
ses he, you mossbacks over thar don't
know the wars over. A niger from
over thar come in town t'other day an
heerd fer the fust time that he was
free. Two men over thar swapped
wives without KNOWN thar was law
ag:n it. Half o. you uns never laid eyes
on a railroad an wouldn't have one as
a free gift I turned off an left i'm
an went up on the main street. Up
thar barber ketched me by the arm
an said. ses he: Come in an le' me
cut that hair. You are from Short
Pine. amt you? I axed him why he
thought so, an he said. ses he, 'Beca'se
you got Short Pine hair cut What's
that? ses I. An he laughed at feller
cooked up in a cheer an said: It's
cut that is made by the women out
yore way. They jest turn saucer
upside down on the mems heads an
trim around the edges. l could tell
one mile. They make a man look
like a bobtailed mule Laughter,
loud and prolonged.l
Eyes, as ! said. they are a-pokin' all
manner O. fun at us. an it's chiefly be-
case we hain't got no railroad. The
maddest I ever got on this line was
down at Filmore's store one day. A
little, slick chap come along sellin'
maps Of the United States of America.
They was purity things on black sticks,
an I wanted one fer the wall O. my
room. / was about to buy one, but
thought I'd fust make shore that our
county was on it, 80 axed the peddler
to pint it out to me. Well, after some
s'arch he put his knife blade on what
he called this county, but 10 and be-
hold, it was mighty nigh kivered with
round dots about the size Of fyspecks.
What's the matter with It? I axed i'm.
oh, you mean them dots ses he, an
he turned to lot Of reference words In
the corner Of the map. Them ses he,
'them's put thar to indicate the amount
O. ignorance in a locality. You'll find
'em in all places away from the rail-
roads. A body kin say what they
please agin railroads, but they fetch
schools an books an enlightenment.
You've got a good many specks,' ses
he, kinder comfortin' like, but some O
these days a railroad will shoot out
this away, an them brainy men
amongst you will git the chance God
intends to give 'em.' Gentlemen, I
didn't buy no map. wouldn't "a had
the thing on my wall with the specks
a-starin' me in the face. 1t wouldn't
a. done any good to scrape 'em of, fer
Their traces would "a been left. No,
friends, citizens an wellwishers, thar
amt but one scraper that will ever
rake our specks of, an that's the cow
catcher Of a steam engine. I say let
'er come. Some objection has been
raised on the score O. killin' cattle.
That reminds me Of story they tell
on old Burt Preston, who has farm
on the main line beyant barley. he
was always a-gittin' his stock killed 80
fast an a-puttin' in heavy claims fer
damages, until folks begun to say he
made his livin' by buyin' scrub cattle
an sellin' mashed beef to the corpora
ton. One day the road sent out de-
tective to watch i'm, an he seed Burt
drive a spindlin' yeerlin' out O. the
thicket on the track jest in time to get
it knocked off by through freight. The
detective went back an reported, an
they waited to see what Preston I'D do.
By the next mail they got claim in
which Preston said the yeerlin'
weighed 800 pound an was fine four
gallon milk cow. They threatened to
Jail i'm, an Preston agreed to with
draw his claim. But he got downheart-
ed an traded his place fer farm on
t'other railroad, an the last l heerd O.
him he was at his old trade ag'in. I
reckon that's about the way we'll be
damaged by gettin' our stock killed.
That's all l got to say, gentlemen.
Let's git this road an scrape our fly
specks off,"
TO BE CONCLUDED.