Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1903-04-17

abusive method. Now the abusive
method is, no doubt, very sound for O
man, and for this reason: Woman
knows him to be proposing animal
she is therefore, on the qui vive; she
leads up to it. But woman proposing
for the first time, as l was doing, is in
a very different position. The man,
naturally, never suspects her inten-
ton (having always regarded her as a
mere passive proposee); he cannot
make out what she is driving at, and
so her allusiveness is lost on him.
"Yes," said 1 to myself, "there is only
one way-the direct way. 1 must treat
him as one treats children. must be
plain, literal, precise. 1 must say
| what l mean in the most simple un.
equivocal language. Yea. / must, as
it We're, propose to him in words of one
| syllable. L love you. Will you wed
meT There can be no mistake about
that. 1t is the formula that 1 shall
certainly adopt"
We next met about four days later.
1t was in a tea shop in Bond street. l
was drinking chocolate alone at a
little table. There was a bunch of
hyacinths in q vase on the table. He
came in; he saw me; he took a chair
| opposite to me. Greetings were eX-
! changed. looked about. No one was
near. Here was my chance. Bravely
| began:
81 love"
There stopped. The "you'-simple,
easy little word-would not for some
reason come out. 1t stuck in my throat.
"Well! What do you love?" he in
quired
The "what" irritated me. Was ever
such incorrigible denseness? A woman
| would have had the sense to say
whom" as q matter of course. But
he had invited a neuter, and neuter
he should have, if only to punish him.
81 love-hyacinths," I said, GROSSLY.
Yet even here there would have been
a way out had he possessed an ounce
of perception. He had only to say, as
woman in like case would have said:
Happy hyacinths"
Then l should have remarked:
81 always associate you with hya-
cinths."
But what do you think the opaque
creature did say?
Don't care for 'em myself? Smell
too strong"
1t was really impossible to do any
thing with such perfect miracle of
obtuseness. So my second chance was
lost.
IN ri
after two failures is no reformer. l
must try again. l must be still more
simple; still more elementary in my
language. After ALL the 81 love you.
VIII you wed me?" formula was what
logicians would call complex proposi-
tion-a combination of the categorical
II love you," which in view of what
followed, was really superfuous.
would only retain the essential por-
ton, viz, the interrogative "Win you
wed me-"
Four plain words of one syllable.
Surely, these admitted Of no ambiguity
or misapprehension.
Our next encounter was in Piccadiily,
on the north side, near Devonshire
House. 1 was walking west, he east.
We met face to face. 1 held out my
hand. He took it. Now was the time.
l made the fateful plunge.
"Will you-"
Would you believe it? At that su-
preme moment, by the cruellest stroke
of luck (surely the stars in their courses
We're fighting against mel, l swallowed
the wrong way, and had violent chok-
ing fit which lasted for two minutes.
1t was too eXasperating. To be put
off-just at the critical point-by a
silly little affair of the windpipe. OF
course, couldn't complete my sentence
after that. 1t would have been like
finishing ones best story when one
has been interrupted in the middle.
| So when Charles Wilton, having
waited in polite sympathy until 1 had
done choking, remarked:
"You were about to ask me"
'To come to tea tomorrow after
noon," 1 replied, feeling obliged to
say something.
with the greatest pleasure" he re-
Joined.
When I returned home 1 found-to
my satisfaction-that mamma would be
out the following afternoon.
II shall see him alone. And this
time I will succeed" said I to myself,
setting my teeth resolutely.
should have succeeded, too. There
is no doubt about that. But an I'M
looked for accident again baffied me.
Before l had time to say a word,
Charles suddenly exclaimed:
81 say! BY Jove! don't you know"
Those We're his precise words.
Neither more nor less. Not much in
them, is there? But somehow, like
! Mercutios wound, they served. He
took me in his arms.
1t was like leaving out all the proof
in one of Euclid's props" and jump
ing straight from the hypothesis to the
Q. T.. d.
But the Q. e. d. was reached? True.
Yet see in what position it placed