davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1903-02-12

Want ads in Star cost but % cents.
The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1903-02-12
COLLECTOR sTRATToN DEPARTS.

Collector F. S. Stratton of San Fran
cisco departed today on the Hongkons
Maru, accompanied by his wife. They
are making a tour of the Orient.
The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1903-02-12

MAUNA LOA DEPARTS TOMORROW
The steamer Mauna Loa departs at
noon tomorrow for Lahaina, Maalaea,
Kona and Kau ports.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1903-07-25
TEN COMMANDMENTS OF HEALTH.

Thou shalt have no other food
than at meal times.
Thou shalt not make unto thee
any pies for the dyspepsia will be Wis
tied upon the children to the third
and fourth generations of them that
eat pie and long life and vigor upon
those that live prudently and keep
the laws of health.
Remember thy bread to bake it
we'll for he will not be kept sound
who eateth his bread as dough.
Thou shalt not indulge sorrow nor
borrow anxiety in vain.
Six days shalt thou wash and keep
thyself clean, and the seventh take a
great bath, for in six days man sweats
and gathers filth and bacteria enough
for disease; whereupon the Lord has
blessed the bath tub.
Remember the sitting room and
bed chamber and keep them venti-
lated.
Thou shalt not eat hot biscuit.
Thou shalt not eat thy meat fried.
Thou shalt not swallow thy food
unchewed, or highly spiced, or just
before hard work, or just after it.
Thou shalt not keep late hours in
thy neighbor's house, nor with his
cards, nor his glass, nor with any
thing that is thy neighbor's.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1903-07-25
A COMMON CUSTOM.

Why does a man always run his
hand through his hair when he takes
his hat off 7" asked an observant
man. "Did you ever notice that man
will invariably do this very thing
Is it just nervous habit? Is it van
ity? It's an old habit. have never
known a man who did not indulge
this habit. Even men who have no
hair to run their fingers through,
men whose heads are as bald as bill
lard balls, will brush their hands
hats. If the men simply warfteu r2
smooth their tousled hair, of course
this would afford ample explanation
of the habit. But why should man
who has no hair on his head do the
same thing? 1t is not a sufficient
answer to say that such man may
have had full suit of hair at one
time and that it is simply matter of
habit contracted under different con-
ditions. AS a rule, men are uncon-
scious of the fact. They do not know
why, how or when they run their
hands over their heads. But they all
do it just the same. Go into court
room or at any place where men con-
gregate and where it is necessary for
them to remove their hats and watch
them. You will observe that every
man will go through the same per-
Torrance. 1t seems to be perfectly
natural thing for them to do. My
own conclusion is that it is an evil
dence of vanity. A man wants his
hair to be just so. Originally proba-
bly, it was simply matter of tidiness.
But it has grown into All act of vanity.
The lawyer, for instance, if he has
enough hair for the purpose, will
want his head to have tousled ap-
pearance. 1t gives him a studious
appearance and leaves the impression
that he has been struggling with the
books. Whatever the reason, the
habit is curious one and one which
seems to be deep rooted in the mascu-
line nature"
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1903-07-25
ORIGIN OF LAGER BEER.

Two practical brewers as they CON
versed the other day had an argument
over the invention of lager beer. A
third brewer joined them and said
Lager beer was not invented. Il
was discovered-accidentally discov-
cred. Here is the story as my grand
father handed it down to my father !:
A saddler of the German town Of
Bamberg sent his apprentice one
morning in the Middle Ages for 4
bottle of the beer they used in those
days-a vile beer that was drunk as
soon as it was brewed. The appren-
tice bought the bottle, and on the
way home with it met practical
joker. The joker said to him:
Your boss is looking for you.
He says you have spoiled three days
work, and he 10 going to boetes, ,roti
with cart whip
"At this news the apprentice was
so scared that he buried the beer
under a tree and ran off and enlisted
in the army. He prospered in the
army. In time he became an officer
and got the cross of honor. Then he
thought he would return to his native
town.
when, with long furlough, he
drew near the town, he recalled the
bottle of beer he had buried and he
dismounted from his charger on reach
ing the well-remembered tree and dug
the bottle up and carried it to his
former master.
"'Old man. he said, you sent me
after bottle of beer five years ago.
Here is the beer now.'
'The master embraced him, con-
graduated him on his success in life
and opened the bottle to share with
him its contents. Such excellent
beer neither had ever tasted before.
1t was like old wine. The master as
soon as he learned that it was burial
that had SO much benefited it, bought
1000 bottles of beer buried them, and
five years later sold them at great
profit, for everybody that tasted the
new drink loved it.
"In time the secret leaked out.
Breweries everywhere came to know
that beer, by lying, improved. So
they all adopted the lying process,
and they called the new drink lying
or lager beer for lager means ly-
ing, as you know.
In the past centuries they let beer
lie longer than we do now. This
is a fast age, you know.-PhiladeL-
bhta Rec0,d.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1903-07-25
THE TOO EARLY BIRD.

The too early birds are a source of
trouble and inconvenience to the en-
tire neighborhood.
Invite the too early birds to din
ner, and they arrive an hour before
the time.
Your last little touches have to be
delegated to the first amiable soul
who appreciates the misery of enter
tanning the too early birds. You had
intended to replace a vase of carna-
tions with one of roses or possibly
you had at the last moment intended
to shift the plate cards, having sud-
denly remembered that Miss Jones
has quiet fancy for Mr.. Smith that
Mr.. Smith reciprocated.
Mr.. Smith will have to wonder, and
Miss Jones will have to summon up
SE4.s-> ff.--s2.-~-4ss
must be greeted as though you were
glad to see them and appreciated their
apparent impatience to have the fun
begin.
You really would like to give your
hair another touch, but not SO. Your
guests await you.
The too early birds haunt the rail-
way stations hours before the train
leaves and start off on the journey
jaded and out of sorts.
If the too early birds are ever amia-
bic it is at such previous" hour
that the rest of mankind is elsewhere,
and the fact is not generally appre-
ciated.
If there is one class of humanity
more exasperating than the too easily
birds have yet to meet them. The
man who is too late may entail in
convenience, but at least you have
the satisfaction of noting his discom-
future at missing the treat through his
own act.
The too early birds are an infic-
ton, and they carry with them no
compensating reflection whatever.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1903-07-25
IN YOUR OWN HANDWRITING.

In glancing over list of want ad-
vertisements' in city paper one
morning, we were struck by the fire.
quent occurrence of this phrase !:
"Apply in your own handwriting"
We have been reminded of ten
enough that Dean Stanley and Hor-
ace Greely and many other distin-
guished men could hardly read their
own handwriting after the ink was
dry; nevertheless we were impressed
by the fact that the twentieth-cen-
tury boy who writes a neat, legible
hand, without scrawling, or blotting,
or adorning his capitals with too
many fourishes, has an advantage
over others.
Shakespeare spelt his name in sew
era1 different ways, they tell us, but
business men who are advertising for
help always choose those young folks
whose spelling has no eccentricities.
A neat signature may give you your
first start toward success in life. A
mlSSpelled word may stand between
you and your chance.
Another thought came to us in
connection with that simple little di-
rection in the advertisement column,
Apply in your own handwriting.
Many a boy is confident of getting
on in the world because his father
is man who has won esteem and a
parcel of influence. But except in
rare instances the world takes us fol
what we are, and not for what OUT
father has done. h
No business man advertising for
help ever inserted this clause, zap.
ply in your fathers handwriting.
A fathers uprightness and industry
and earnestness cannot long be a helE
to boy who is lazy and Indifferent
and ready to take advantage of bis
employer.
And the sooner any youth about te
enter active life realizes that he musi
stand on his own merits, the better
| for all concerned.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1903-07-25
THE VOLUNTEER oRGAN1sr.

The gret big church wuz crowded full of broad
cloth an NV silk,
An satins rich as cream thet grows on our oil
Shined boots, billed shirts stiff dickeys and stove
pipe hats were there,
An doods 18th trouserloons so tight they couldn't
kneel in prayer.
The elder in his pulpit high, said, as he slowly
"our organist is KEEP to hum, laid up 18th room
atiz,
An as we hev no substitoot. as Brother Moore
VIII some ''un in the congregation be so kinds
to volunteer"
An then a red-nosed, drunken tramp. OF low
toned, rOwdy style,
Give an interduct'ry hiccup an then staggered
Then thro' the holy atmosphere there crep' q
An thro' thet air er sanctity the odor Nv oil gn
Then Deacon Purin'ton he yelled, his teeth all
This man pIrfanes the house of God! Why,
this Is sakerlege!"
The tramp didn't hear a word he said but
slouched 18th stumblin' feet,
An sprawled an staggered up the steps, an
gained the organ seat
He then went pawin' thro' the keys, an soon
Thet seemed to Jest bulge out the heart, an
'lectrify the brain;
An then he slapped down on the thing 18th hands
and head an knees
He slamdashed his hull body down kerfiop upon
the keys.
The organ roared, the music food went sweep
ing high an dry,
1t swelled into the raftcrs, an bulged out into
the sky;
The OF church shook an staggered, an seemed
An the elder shouted "Glory !" an yelled out
"Hooray"
An then he tried tender strain thet melted In
our ears,
Thet brought up blessed memories an drenched
'em down 18th tears;
An we dreamed NV ol'-time kitchens, 18th Taby
Nv home an luv an baby days, an mother, an
all that
An then he struck q streak NV hope-a song
from souls forgiven
Tibet burst from prison-bars Nv sin, an stormed
the gates Nv heaven;
The mornin' stars they sung togther-nO soul
We felt the universe wuz safe an God wuz on
His throne
An then wall Nv deep despair an darkness
come again,
An long black Grape hung on the doors NV all
the homes Nv men;
No luy no light no joy, no hope, no songs Nv glad
An then the tramp he staggered down an reeled
into the night
But we knew he'd toll his story. though he never
spoke word,
An it wuz the saddest story thet our ears he'd
ever heard;
He he'd toll his own life history, an no eye wuz
dry thet day,
Wen the elder rose an simply said my breth-
rem, let us pray" Sam Waller Foss.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1903-07-25
LIFE IN A FACTORY TOWN.


You people who live in the CITY
think you are strenuous you think
your business is exacting; you actu-
ally believe that when you die it will
be from nervous prostration.
The speaker addressed some friends
who, like himself, were homeward
bound. He continued
'But you go to your homes. or to
your clubs, or to your links, or some
where by the sea, and you rest up
for the whirl of the next day.
Did you ever go to manufacture
ing town where everybody in the
place IS a factory man, woman, bov
or girl? There is where you find the
tired people.
The homes, or rather the houses
in which the people live, stand unoc-
1zsrvery ossSy 1ns occupants wa1k ont IN
droves and professions to the factory.
"For some reason which I cannot
explain most of the men quit work in
the afternoon before the women stop.
| suppose one reason of this is that
the men belong to unions which won't
let them work after a certain hour.
"Were you ever in one of these
factories when the men quit work?
The women, those who are wives,
say to their husbands who are quit
ting:
Geo home and put on the pota-
toes and get the meat and vegetables
ready, and will put them under
way as soon as I come.
'"Then as the men start away they
will hear parting -admonition
You might spread the table and have
it ready when come.
"The men go out as meek as lambs.
They go home from the bench to the
drudgery of the house, don't know
as they call it drudgery, but that is
what it would be to you. The wo-
men follow. Perhaps they are hap
pier than some women of the city who
go home from shopping or from the
matinee.
"The long line trudges homeward
and takes up the work of the men.
The frugal meal is prepared. 1t may
taste sweeter to these people than
course dinners to which some of us sit
down. I hope it does.
'The sound of the summer wind
in the gathering darkness of the night
may be more musical than the orches-
ira to which you listen while you
dine. I hope SO. But the meal over,
the workers of the day go quickly to
bed, for they must be up with the
break of day.
II have had occasion to spend a
week in one of these factory towns,
and the life, as I have described it,
left me jaded as no days work in the
city ever did. I speak from observa-
ton only. I don't say that these
spent IN the Factory fowh or wnrcr-T
speak I came back to the city more
contented man."
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1903-07-25
WASHINGTON HAD A MODEL FARM,

In his mature life Washington S
one expressed ambition was to be the
leading farmer of America, and he
worked diligently to earn that title by
Introducing new methods of husban-
dry. He even invented a plow. In
his progressiveness he conducted
what might be not inappropriately
termed the first practical experiment
tai agricultural station on the CONT
nent. All the latest machinery he
learned about he promptly imported.
he tried many kinds Of tobacco and
wheat, experimental with various
kinds of fertilizers, and developed the
breeding of thoroughbred horses. cat
tie and sheep.
There were many industries on
Washington's farm. He maintained
a b1ao1xcsaitta aiaef -~l4;et. =. :Ia:1:--
70 the work of the plantation, shod
horses and repaired implements and
wagons for the neighbors. He had
also a force of carpenters whom at
times lie hired out to construct dwell
ing hotses in Alexandria and the ma
tional apital. Washington conduct
ed flo1r mill at Mount Vernon and
established an enviable and profitable
reputation for the extra brand of flour
produced He often bought wheat
from other farms in Virginia and
ground il into -four for the market.
A cooperage was another of his in
dustries, and even the schooners that
carried his barrels to market belong
ed to him.
1t would be hard to imagine more
complete establishment than that
which he conducted. Shoemakers at
Mount Vernon turned out all the
shoes worn on the estate. Weavers
in his employ produced the linen, the
woolens, the linsey and the cotton
cloth needed. There was also a dis
tillery, the revenue from which some
times exceeded ST, 500 annually. His
fisheries along the Potamac were also
sources of considerable profit.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1903-07-25
A GREAT IDEA.

An Irish undertaken was laying
out the deceased husband of weep
ing Hibernian widow. The corpse
wore wig, and it was with difficult
to induce it to stay on straight, as
wigs ought always to do, even if they
don't. The bereaved widow was
called in to assist. "Go an git me
a pot of glue, Mrs. McGovern," said
the undertaken, 80 that I may keep
his wig where it belongs"
Mrs. McGovern set out after the
sticking material and after time she
returned. "Here is the glue for ye, !"
she said, with sigh.
"Mrs. McGovern, ye kin take back
the mucilage," said the undertaken.
"The difficulty is fixed. I used a
tack"
And that was what cause the row.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1903-07-25

bobbing up first, and a few strong
strokes placed him and the struggling
damsel, whom he had grasped, safely
on the shallow reef. Then, picking
her up as though she had been an
infant, he waded solemn1y and, it is
to be presumed, surlily ashore, and
deposited her on the sandy beach ;
after which, seeing that Clara had
brought the skiff to the shore, and
that nothing further remained for
him to do, he swan out to his own
/ craft, righted her, climbed cleverly
in over the stern, and padded away
without another word.
The girls rowed back to their camp.
''He certainly did save your life,
Florence" said Clara.
"Horrid, cross old thing" remark
ed Florence.
Four months later, Florence was
leaning on the arm of her partner, a
distinguished looking officer, with a
huge, dropping black mustache, in a
gaily decorated ballroom. She was
relating to him the little incident of
her ducking during the previous
summer.
"He certainly saved my life, " she
said; "but 1 never saw him again."
I should not speak of B. c. B.
as him at all, +" replied her partner,
stroking his mustache with refec-
tive air.
II should call a thing like that st.
Probably 'it' is still trying to pluck
those fish, and finds the feathers stick
fast. Poor it !" and the handsome
officer sighed.
Florence's blue eyes opened to an
alarming extent, and the rich color
flew to her face.
How do you know? You don't
mean to say" she gasped, as an
awful possibility dawned upon her.
eyes, I do" he laughed. ST was
fishing on Stony Lake last summer.
Sorry could not bring you those
fish, but, you see, you spilled them
out of the canoe when you capsized
me. Let us go on with this waltz.
You are so much nicer to hold like
this than when wet and draggled."
As man and wife are one, we con-
cluded that Florence is now "it" her
self.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1903-07-25
MAN AND MULE.

The mule-he is gentle beast:
And so is man.
He's satisfied to be the least:
And so is man.
Like man he may be taught Soma tricLs.
He does his work from s to6 g.:
The mule-when he gets mad he kiclrs.
And so does man.
The mule-he has a load to pull:
And so has man,
He's happiest when he is full:
And so Is man.
Like man he holds patient poise
AND when his works done will rejoice.
Tne mule-he likes to hear his voice:
And so does man.
The mule-he has his faults, tits true:
And so has man.
he does some things he should not do;
And so does man.
Like man he doesn't yearn for stvle.
But wants contentment all the while,
The mule-he has lovely smile:
And so has man.
The mule is sometimes kind and good:
And so Is man.
he eats all kinds of breakfast food;
And SO does man.
Like man he balks at gaudy dress
The mule IS accused of mnnsnness
And so is man.
st. Louis Globe Democrat.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1903-07-25
WEDDING EXPENSES.

All wedding expenses are assumed
by the brides family. Wedding day,
church, clergyman and all details are
of the brides choosing.
Since the bride become his wife
after the ceremony, the bridegroom
is privileged to fee the clergyman,
sexton and organist. He also hires
the carriage in which he and his wife
leave the church.
The bride usually gives about a
week before the wedding a dinner or
luncheon, to which the groom, best
man and ushers are sometimes in
vited.
The duties of the best man are to
see that the bridal couple arrive pune
tually at the church, to take charge
of the ring and to perform all other
little commissions incident to the
ceremony. He makes all arrange
ments for the wedding trip and sees
that the happy couple are safely
started on their honeymoon.-Ame,-
ieaw Queen.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1903-07-25
TWO KINDS OF GRASS.

At a certain revival meeting of col
ored folks in a church in North Caro-
lima the minister announced from the
pulpit: "My tex is Let de woman
parn in silence wild all subjection.'
You will done fin it in de secon'
chapter, 'leventh varse, OBJ Glover" ."
At this mention of an unknown epistle
a good brother plucked the coat tails
of the minister. The latter turned
round, then again faced the audience.
"In spite of de interruption" he said,
"I repeat de tex am from de secon'
chapter, 'leventh varse, OBJ Clover" :"
Again the coat tails were plucked, and
the minister glared at the plucker,
only to turn once more to the congre-
CATION. "Brudder Johnson, j." he said,
"objects to de tex Let woman parn
in silence We all know dat Sister
Johnson am not silent woman. But
l done repeat dat de tex will be foun'
in de secon' chapter, 'leventh varse,
OBJ Clover" Here Brother Johnson
rose to the minister's ear and whis-
pered earnestly. "Oh - said the do
mimic. Then to the gaping people
''I asks Sister Johnson's pardon.
Her husban' says I made mistake,
he is dat trihin'. My tex will not
be foun' in de secon' chapter, 'leventh
varse, OBJ Clover, but in de secon'
chapter, 'leventh varse, OBJ Timothy.
I knowed it was some kind OBJ grass.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1903-07-25
A LESSON IN PUNCTUATION.

A Philadelphia school girl said to
her father the other night:
Daddy, I've got sentence Ia
like to have you punctuate. You
know something about punctuation,
don't you 7"
eyes; a little" said her cautious
parent, as he took the slip of paper
she handed him.
This is what he read:
"a SIS bill flew around the corner. :
He studied it carefully, and finally
said:
"Well, I'd simply put a period
after it, like this"
81 wouldn't said the High School
girl; "I'd make dash after it.
WALTER (aged ive)-"Papa, when
grow up may I get married 7"
Papa-"My son, regret to see
you anticipate troubles so early IN
life."
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1903-07-25
WHAT Is SUCCESS! I!

A man may live so far below the
standard to which he ought to attain
that observers will see only his pur-
suit when their attention is called to
him and they will say: "He is a
scavenger," or ''He is a drayman, "
or "He is a porter" On the other
hand, he may live so nobly, and illus
trate the Christian virtues so beauti-
fully, that beholders will lose sight of
his humble vocation in their admira-
ton of the man.
To make money is not the grea test
requisite for true success in business.
But to gain reputation for honora-
Bile business methods, to have the
confidence of business men and the
respect of employees, coupled with
successful business management,
should be the aim of all young men
who enter upon business career.
The majority of successful men are of
this type, and few ever succeed in
making money who have no higher
purpose than gain. Honorable am
bition is the leaven that raises the
whole mass of mankind. Ideals, Wis
ions, are the stepping stones by which
we rise to higher things.
Poverty and hardships have ever
been the great schoolmasters of the
race, and have forced into prominence
many a man who would otherwise
have remained unknown. There is
no open door to the temple of success.
Every one who enters makes his own
door, which closes behind him to all
others. With the poet, we feel that
We rise by things that are meath our feet;
| By what we have mastered of good and gain;
| By the pride deposed and the passion slain;
And the vanquished ills we hourly meet.
What is put into the first of life is
put into the whole of life.
Start right. Far down the path oi
success we shall gather, for Our re-
ward, flower of toll, patience and
character.
"YoU ARE granted divorce,
said the lawyer to colored client
"but you'll have to give her ali
mony."
Gall right, suh," was the eagel
reply. "She kin have Alimony e.
she wants him, but Lawd help hin
wen he gets her u
SrELLA-"That fellow is perfect
ly killing"
Ella-"It's heredity; his father
was motorman."