The San Francisco call., 1903-12-03
Is Marriage a Barter?
BY onss) DORA MAY MoRRELL.

Copyright. 1908 by Joseph B. Bowles)
Even the superficial student of GUS
toms knows that the idea of matri-
mony as a two-sided affair in which
woman has as much interest as man,
with her individual tastes as much to
be regarded, is scarcely two genera
tions old. Even now marrying is not
exclusively the result of devotion of
man TO woman and of woman to man.
Marrying formerly rested wholly with
the man as it yet does among depend
ent women. Probably when the prime
val man raped over the head and
carried off the woman who attracted
him he was showing as much senti-
ment as was needfu1, and her opinion
was not sought The girl who escaped
such masculine attention was an un-
fortunate. despised by her companions
and by herself, too. that she was al
lowed to walk in safety.
After clubbing went out Of style, and
barter became the rule, it was still the
male who selected, and the female who
accepted the result without demur
With the twentieth century the form
of bartering has changed somewhat,
for do we not see our rich girls be
coming buyers Of dukes and other titled
men not too proud to be sold in as
open a market as if put up to auction
Indeed, throughout the world, in civil
lied and uncivilized lands. marriage re-
mains more a matter of sale than of
sentiment, but the reaction has started
which will some day make this i'm
possible.
When there was open to woman no
career but matrimony to which any
respect was attached it was natural
that she should marry as she had op-
portunity. all the more that she real
lied so little before entering upon it
what matrimony meant. 1t was equal
| ly natural that the woman who did not
marry presumably because not chosen
should become an object Of pity and
scorn, for by being left she was proved
| lacking in those feminine attributes
which attracted men-she had not been
true to her sex. so to speak Thus 'old
maid" became a stigma to avoid at
any cost of ones feelings if one pos
! sessed more pride than heart; and
many a woman did, and many wom-
an has married not for love or even for
a home. but that on her tombstone
might be written Wife Of 1t scarce
ly seems that such a motive could in
spire one to so vital step. Yet it did,
and strongly in the years when wom-
ems career was domestic or nothing
when. in fact. she was a superfiuous
woman If not married
Even to-day. with all the possibilities
open to the young woman, she will be
heard discussing the respective merits
of Fred or John and weighing one
against the other, exactly as she would
do If a third were to come into the bid
ding. Still, you see, matter of sale
and sale no less that it is done under
the guise of law and Of respectability
If a woman is influenced by worldly
conditions in her consideration of d
mans proposal, or IL she goes TO him
for any other reason than that he is
the complement of her nature, the be-
ing who makes her glad she is wom-
an. she sells herself as truly as IL she
did II without the sanction of the law
There are women who do not marry
because they viii not marry without
] the sentiment that to them is the true
sanctihcation of the marriage relation
There have always been such women
not many Of them, for they had TO be
strong enough to walk alone, and that
is painful at best; and they had not
only to walk alone, but to face scorr
for being braver and truer than the
average of their sex.
That many women formerly entered
the marriage state without any rea
drawing toward IL is shown by the
eagerness with which women have
turned toward other means of support
as these have opened up to them. Moth
| ing has ever been seen in social econom-
les like the welcome given by womer
to ways of self-support. and though
the thrush of the sex into various lines
has brought some evils, it has healed
others, and the disturbance is like the
fermentation in wine, that makes the
mass good and ultimately clears it