New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1903-11-03
THE PATRIOT BAND.
Now DR.. Wiey's men sit round
With countenances placid.
For they are full of country love
And calicNiig acid
Chicago Tribune.


age of Wiggetthal. Argovie is causing the munich
pal council the greatest embarrassment The father
died shortly before BIRTH lea wing fve-tenths
Of his fortune to the expected child If It were a
boy and three-tenths if a girl, the mother 10 re
ceive the remainder. The mother of the twins has
appealed the local municipal authorities to
carry out the terms OF the will. Although the
members of the council have had the case under
consideration for nearly month. they have not
yet arrived at definite decision
Two Doses Daily Enough-Hewitt-B used
to be big eater, but now he has only two meals a
jewett-You know the reason. don't you?
Hewtt-No what is it? .
Jewett-The doctor gave him some medicine TO
take after each meal--CBrooklyn Lie
Two Scottish tourists were travelling day
last August from Cahircfveen TO Kenmare, when
suddenly looked very gloomy. according TO
az. G." What's the natter asked his friend.
why ! have lost the better part OF my luggage
replied the other. in a tone Of disgust. Was IL
stolen. did you leave it at the hotel?' Worse
than eithcr-the cork came out"
DIRE POSSIBILITY
lit mistake for Canada 70 allow the United
sf e ro 52 get in he a8aa IS pa i2 G
Brethren tremble wheE you think OF
cur aurora bOrealis
Being captured by Yankee
Who would take il down to Dallas,
The domain that's full OF cactus.
With a nasal murmur: ''Thankee
l must keep myself in practice
Fellow citizens: SILVER
At the thought of Uncle Sammy
Sailing northward with compass
To remove each neck and silver
And each bemsh to abolish
From the North Pole. What rumpus
II he tried TO put on polish!
Oh Canadians take warning
Should the Yankees thus surround
They will write a proclamation
Swearing that they have Just found
All our ITOtestatiOnS scorning.
They will worry and perpex us
NTH n befr
They will skilfully annex US
Let us Reep the pole We cherish
Though we don't know its location
For Canadian explorers
Have o thew oT 9 f69f In L PrfP pdTs6
Ere this spot imaginary
Is yanked from our mental soarers
-(Chicago Tribune.
The imperlal dignity of the German Emperor
who is well known all the world to be
thusiastic huntsman, may have been tribe damp
cned when he sank to his hips in bog while he
Devastating within one of his enormous do
mains He pulled out without any damage
cept to the appearance Of his clothes. Later he
gave orders that the swamp should be drained and
filed with earth
Power Of Habit-"Thst fellow Bonner you intro
duced me to is the most reckless prevaricator 1
Yes but he doesn't mean any harm by it. It's
tonana, you know"
Was born liar. eh?'
as S Sf q Weather eT D sSrEse ' c
Journal.
4 farmer went into the Office Of a Biddeford NdeD
dentist the other day and inquired what the charge
was for pulling tooth.
twenty-five cents without gas and fifty cents
II you take gas" replied the dentist
Il don't want any gas" said the farmer.
Il admire your courage" replied the dentist
Most. people want To take gas
oh II isn't me. it's my wife that's going to have
the tooth out" explained the farmer
Not a Success-"Ol hear II said tn excursion
vas "A failure. thOt thrue2'
We ken out ahead Ia the. mgtther O. money.
lut twas not a success socially al all al all Diyii
q polis-man had 20 dhraw his club the whole weary
day Brooklyn Lire.
Published statistics Indicate that the average OF
height among the little brown men nf Japan il In
creasihg The people Of that brave enterprIsing
and progreesfve nation have been taking a great
deal of thought I'M recent. years and even II they
have. not heen abie lay taking thought 10 add a
cubf IL their stature. they may possibly have sue
cecded In producing clonga ton a moderate ex-
tent.
Too serious-Miss Ascum-So you're not en-
gagged 10 him more
Mics Giddav-Oh. no. Just had 10 break n OF
Ms Asrilnl-Whv. what the tier
Niss e,jdd4y>+Thc Simpletou got too sentimental
He was beginning 10 talk 10 me about marriage
80 a. Dr.