The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1903-08-09
Chirnnnie Fadden
....and Duchess
Copyright 1908, by Robert Howard Russell.

Duchess calls her Miss Fanniey just. de
same as always, 'cept in company,
when we calls her Ma'am, dat being
Yankee for Missus in French Little
Miss Fannie I calls Kiddie,s but Ouch.
ess has form name what she calls her
La Petite-what is French for Petite.
In dis way and dat I'm getting
strange holt on French, and expect to
get a fall and decision on de lang
wudge by de time I has to go to Paris
to live, what is de programme Duchess
has laid out for me old age. OATS
why I hate to grow old; and I'll beat
de Paris game, if 1 has to make a half
way trip overs de Brooklyn bridge to
do it.
We is living up at our place on de
Sound now, and has learned Kiddie to
swim, and learned meselfs how to pull
de plug out of a pint, and solve de fizz
without missing a drop, when Mr..
PauPs yacht is doing stunts wit her
keel out Of water, and her rail under.
OATS de way he likes to sail. If ever
he has to go and try to bring de cup
back from Sir Tumis, he'll bring it
won Miss Fannie he has won most
everything else in sight, and has took
to sail yachts again; using de steam
yacht only for gailly gaillyy trips when
Miss Fannie has parties to entertain.
What wit Sailing and cruising, Pm get
ting SO salt, and Duchess so peppery,
and Whiskers so oily dat if dere was
little vinegar aboard we could be
| mixed up for salad dressing.
"Chimmie," says Mr.. Paul to me de
odder day, 1--WE will go out for a little
spin in de toity-footer today. Is de
| hamper packed?"
yes, sir" I says. "Dere is half a
dozen bottles and six sandwiches in it."
Don't take up to much room wit de
sandwiches" he says, winking at
Whiskers. Twill you go wit us, me
dear?" he asks Miss Fannie.
mo tank you, DEAR" she says. ~
prefer me daily bat in de bat tub.
I've invited some young people from
de hill for a trip" she says.
So dat was de way we come to take
de trip 1 was going to tell you about.
But foist let me ask you; remember
Wiley Wildly? She's de gailly- gailly
goil what is entered for de Whiskers'
stake. Since Miss Fannie married Mr..
Paul she isn't as leary of Wiley Wildly,
as she was when Wildly made a bluff
at being in de running for Mr.. Paul
himself l used to think Miss Fannie
was shy of Wildly because she didn't
fancy her for a step-modder, but now
I. know she was only riding her own
| race when she used to take de rail
q from WILDLY Tirr to,
| now. Duchess says dat Miss Fannie
| wouldn't mind if Wildly landed Whisk-
ers. 'i11fi W5.4 Jl.dH
OATS one of de funniest tings about
wonderland all tfngs about EN- is
funny. When Miss Fannie didn't know
wedder or not she wanted to marry Mr.
Paul, dere was no mistake dat she
didn't want Wildly to marry him.
"How's dat?" I says to- Duchess.
whats de system of favorites wit wo-
menu" 1 says. IF Miss Fannie taut
she didn't want Mr. Paul why wouldn't
she let Wildly have him? And if it was
/ Whiskers she was protecting den, why
Is she willing to let Widdie raid him
now?" '',+
1T Is on de simple Duchess says,
wit dat cock-sure way women has
when dey is putting you wise on
who is whose steady, and why when
| woman has not de acquaintance of
her heart in a particular case, dere is
noting dat SO quick decides her mind
as annodder woman's."
"Anodder woman's what?" says L.
"Anodder woman's mind" says Ouch
ess, wit scorn for me tic head "It was
not dat Wildly really wanted Mr. Paul,
but she did want Miss Fannie married
again, and happy enough not to be too
careful about her papa"
"Her -Whiskers? Was he play
| ing tag, too?"
Stupid! Whiskaire was de whole
| what you say-de whole woiks for
Wildly. So long as Miss Fannie re-
| main unconsoled, she would not let
f, Wildly be consoled. So to get Miss
Fannie out of de objecting humor.
Widdy's play was to get her married,
| and. naturellement, Wildly, being a
wise woman, pretend for to have a
| sentiment for Mr.. Paul. Den it was all
over but de marriage. So soon as
Miss Fannie discover dat annodder wo-
| man tink sentimental of Mr.. Paul
voila!-Mr. Paul in a walk wins, as
you say"
Honest, what do you tink of lime
light song like dose? When it's a case
of what's mans number wit a wo-
| man, Duchess can dope out de winner
without knowing age, weight, or pre-
vious performances.
Well, anyway, since Mr.. Paul signed
a life contract as Miss Fannies Num-
Der One, she has never knocked Wild
| dy's gailly- gailly stunts wit Whiskers.
But de going has not been smood.
| Whiskers run onto shy streak in him
self. asks Duchess to explain dat out
| of her fortune book, and she says it
was too easy.
WILDLY men," she says. never
knows what is good for EN-; but wildly
women always improves when dey
! consents to take second"
SIS dat ALP" says l.
isn't it enough? 1t is too muchi
You and me, Chames, must see dat af-
| faire come to a settlement. Wit Whis-
| kaire married to Madam Harding dey
| would set up DER own establishment,
| and den you and me would not have of
| de interference in our management of
| Miss Fannie's houses"
| Dat was a straight tip, for fair;
| cause Whiskers is de only one what
| butts into de game of our running our
| places as we likes.
! Well. as was saying, we starts out
| for a run up de Sound on de steam
| yacht, wit party along dat come from