The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-11-26
Man. His Manner and Methods.
HE'S A MIsFIT.
Lew Dockstader Gives an Original
Definition of the Term.

III
Hes a misnt!''
Did you ever hear a modern anvii-ham-
merer use that expression? And when
used, did yon not wonder what it meant?
Listen to the explanation of the greatest
misfit-as far as clothes go-in the world
today. His right name is Wei Redatsk-
cod. Spell it backward cut out the cou-
pom and you win the prize.
Ever hear or a snisfit?" asked Lew
III not let me put you i'm the game Un
them. I'll throw calcium light on the
whole outfit of them if you'H keen quiet
and don't butt 81"
Upon being assured that attention of
the all-ears variety would be given. Lew
cut loose in his natural lingo about as
follows:
II am perfectly wise as to the insists.
as i am one of them myself For twenty
years have been wearing misfft clothes.
and they have helped me draw my little
yellow envelope every Tuesday night
That's the night the fellow who wears the
Dig diamond and stands In front of the
box office, offering 20 buy everybody a
drink, get on his naughty stare and
comes back of the scenes with a bunch OF
gold Just two decades ago the public got
next TO me and my act, and rising most
in unison. demanded something new. At
that time the life of q minstrel was a
pretty easy one. You had to sit on the
end chair and crack fake jokes. while the
solOlsts were getting their wind and tile
playing at CarncrOss', in Philadelphia.
and for several weeks I got away with
the old stuff I was using. One night a
fellow from Tidioute visited the show.
Aftec L was through he made a little
speech, asked me to get something new
and doled me few torrid tips about be
ing close to the dead line-a sort OF an
Andersonville prison gag. Then the
Quakers for once got up and declared
themselves. So had to hunt uD some
About that time somebody had VAIN
dered into Philadelphia and opened up
one of those misfit establishments where
they unloaded suits that weren't good
enough for the people I'm some other town.
lt was one of those joints with signs all
over the window Ike. Wear me 90 dinner
for $500 4 was built for a prince but
I'm do for YOU for SSH and a few other
choice selections from Shylock's court
speech In The Merchant of Venice The
minute the PhiladelphiauS got III pounded
INTO those things they wear above their
necks that there was a fellow i'm town
ready to give them the best of il. they
locked about the store like q lot of Sc
cret service detectives around the home
or a poor, misguided anarchist. I'm q
fortnight all the swells i'm town were
wearing misfit suits I decided to get one
and ] did. After calling on an the lead
ing tailOrs, / finally compromised with a
secondhand dealer for a dress suit the
girth of the trousers to be eighty-four
inches. the coat to measure siXty-four
kllometcrs in length. The suit L wore
critics describe. i have worn it ever
since
But there are plenty of misfits i'm real
lie, most of them on the stage. Did yOb
ever see & real cheap melOdrama with q
millionaire in IL? Tkae those millionaire
/ mean one of those real 'SiIas BIoodgood
fellows, who always carry their cheek
books i'm their good clothes. and fiji them
out ON the soap boxes in brigaud's den.
Ihey walk around with a milliOuaire's
nerve. and, to tell YOU the truth If YOU'D
"A " ann Naa.wa 80
ten Of them could flash the price of a
single glass OF lager. These fellows are
insists. Then there are the fellows VINO
were mlllWorkers before they went on the
stage. Watch them play the Percy Has
kells and the 'AlgernOn WhitCombs
They fuss around i'm dress suits They're
always afraid the shirt bosom is coming
out Of the vest and they keep sliding Il
back at the rate of fifteen slides mir
ute. They're mlSflts. too. They have to
play the parts. and it's only the art in 1t
that keeps them from meeting the old lot
of visitors In the shape Of chickens yet
unborn.
81 remember once. when 7 was i'm thu
soaring stage, L was the boss of a n w
York theatre once. and L was constantly
IN need OF money Even after a few stay
the-matinee and-scc-the- lions-feu
schemes ! could not get the people in
that house. 1 used to borrow $1,000 one
day, and second Thousand the next dav
TO pay the first thousand back Things
were looking sky blue when a fellow came
IN one day and wanted to barter with me
on "a safe Yes, sir, that man. i'm the face
or the fact that / was looking for the
morgue wagon to drive up to the door at
any time and take us all out wanted Co
sell me safe. ! looked OF his sample
works. selected the biggest enc I could
find and decided 20 take it, It took three
days TO get that misfit into the house
prevented matinees, and caused all the
trouble they could for me. and was
wise all the time that it was a corking
good ad. Finally they got the safe in
and, as il was after banking hours. I
said would send them check in the
morning. That night the house was
closed. man came around and tackled
a sign on the door, and the safe was no
good after all"