davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1903-04-24
THE JOKE AS A POWER.
1t Is Rapidly ccOniing
Than the Pen.

NIcy. VINO fear nothing else SHRINK
from :, Joke upon themselves. Soldiers
WHO 10 not finch before opposing guns
dread to be made ridiculous. Woe TO
the national hero who makes II TIL
ding mistake which may subject hin
10 clever c%aricature. His meritorious
career is henceforth Swallowed by one
coIored illustration. a comic paper will
tin tie scales of justice, snatch the VIC
+or's prize from his extended palm ma
rob the orator of choicest laurelS. y
brilliant satire will mar the fortunes
of the greatest statesman, q laugh VIII
turn the tide of Il political convention.
Indeed the joke is fast becoming
mightier than the pen. The orator mas
learned its value, and even the clergy
man resorts to it when he desires 10
stir the tagging interest Of his flock.
1t furnishes sufficient excuse for the
impertinence of children, and III ITS
name the daily papers deride the hl&il-
est national dignitaricS.
What is the meaning of its STEADY
growth in power and what results may
we predict from its humorous tyrann! d!
Is there a chance that Il keen relish
for fun may finally produce Il kind Of
humorous dyspepsia resulting from
overindulgence, unless with epicurean
discrimination we demand quality, not
quantity. and stubbornly refuse to
swallow other than that which should
appease a wholesome, nay cultivated
appetite in .iokes?-Caroline Ticknor in
The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1903-04-24

The doctor took one look at the child
and turned to the mother.
Don't you know your boy is coming
down with measles?" he asked Sc
verely.
Eyes, doctor, l knew he was" said
the m
''Then what in the world did you
mean by writing me he had a very bad
cold?'" asked the doctor.
The woman hesitated for a moment;
then, looking at her husband, she said,
with sullen frankness, Neither him
nor me knew how to spell measles"
The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1903-04-24
And in my s


MRS. WINSLOW'S SOOTHING
SYRUP has been used for CHI
dren teething. 1t soothes the
child, softens the gums, allays
all pain, cures wind collie, and is
the best remedy for Diarrhoea.
TWENTY-FIVE cents a bottle.
The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1903-04-24
A Mad ODhelin.

Patience-Why. she Geve the best rep
resentation of Ophelia ! ever saw.
Patrice-Indeed.
Eyes. You know Opllelia is supposed
to be mad!'
yes"
well, there was a party in n of
the boxes, and they talked loud enough
to be heard all over the theater, and
she was the maddost .Ophelia | ever
saw in my l:fe!'-Yonkers Statesman.
The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1903-04-24

The Swedish government has
decided to convert the 1920
miles of railway which it owns
into electric traction systems
operated by the natural power
Of the country.
The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1903-04-24

The gross postal receipts for
the month of March at fifty of
the largest postotfices of the
United States aggregated 3d.
10000, a net increase of S449,-
479, or 81 per cent, over the re-
ceipts for March, 1902.
The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1903-04-24

The postoffice of New York
City has thirty-tWo stations and
159 substations. In it is handled
daily $50 tons of mail matter.
Fourteen stamp canceling ma
chimes each handling $4,000
letters an hour.
The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1903-04-24
FRIDAY, r "a, 1908.


a Mayor-W. B. Saunder
Aldermen First Ward-C. W. Martens.
Aldermen Second Ward-J. s. Farley, George
Empson.
Aldermen Third Ward-E. Johnson, E. W.
Phelan.
Treasurer. NJ. Kaercher.
Auditor-E. p. Dore.
AttOrney-Thos. l.. Bouck.
Assessor-H. J. Benedict.
MarshNl-Charles Sutcliffe.
Night observation-disclosures S. Dore.
Regular meetings of city council held on the
Grst Monday of each month.
Board OF Education-W w. Downie, president,
J.C. Wood, e. Emanuel, X. E. HUSKY, Henry
Schafer, Chas. Cannon, Z. p. Dore, 5. 5. Lock
hart, secretary. Regular meeting last Friday OF
each month.
The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1903-04-24

The Huron Weekly World is
the name Of a new paper re-
Gently started. Arthur Ct.
Keene is editor and Will E.
Holbeen is business manager,
and the first number gives
promise that Huron is now to
have an excellent local paper.
The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1903-04-24

"Weight for weight it is
claimed that bananas beat beef
steak. And moreover, 'there
are cases on record where chill
dren's lives have been saved by
keeping them on a diet OF
bananas.
The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1903-04-24

A soap manufacturer was
asked why he did newspaper
advertising altogether, and did
not use sign boards, etc. He
said that in his experience he
had found that the man that
does not read the newspaper
never uses soap.
The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1903-04-24

When the recent act of Con
gress becomes effective the navy
will have almost 10000 officers
and men.
The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1903-04-24

Illinois is said to have more
miles of railroads and more
miles of bad wagon roads than
any other state in the Union.
The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1903-04-24

A German mathematician esti-
mates that the average old man
consumes $40, 900 worth Of food
in his life.
The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1903-04-24
Her ReaAOu.

DR.. Porter had responded to a note
left at his door by a farmer asking
him to go as soon as possible to see his
little boy, who had "a very bad cold"
The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1903-04-24
COUNTY OFFICERS.

County Judges. S. Lockhart.
County Auditor-Geo. III. Pinckney.
Register Of Deeds-E. p. Brockman.
County Treasurer-Nils Forsberg.
Sheri6-A. X. Crawford.
Clerk Of COurts-W. F. Rabbit.
States Attorney-Thad L.. Fuller.
County Observation-Disclosures Riggle.
Surveyor-W. S. CrOwl.
CorOner-W. A. Kriese:.
County Commissianers-First District, Ben
Moser; Second District John Erickson; Third
District, Julius Fenner
The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1903-04-24

Over $4,000 immigrants ar
rived at New York during the
first ten days of April.
The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1903-04-24

The largest church in the
world is st. Peters, at Rome,
accommodating $4,000 persons.
The herald-advance. (Milbank, S.D.) 1890-1922, 1903-04-24
NG.v.us la AIcs.

II. T. Miller in Ohio ~i'&.lA&r says
Lung and throat wCrIsS do i- u
common in this country rs H. E&-..-
nor nearly SO prevalent rs $ cjnAv,: ,.
intestinal WORKS. Cur saveT.l y.aj~
experience as shepherd in both co..
tries has been quite tie reverse CT this
Further OF in the same article the doc.
tor says, Il want 10 repeat llat il QUO,
sheep in a Goc.i is affected al are
This does not lit in with or expert
ence, for we have slaughtered lunches
of lambs where some Of the stouEacls
of the poorer individuals would be lit
orally alive with stomach worms. while
in others of the same band not q trace
of q worm could be dptec1ed.-W Wool
Markets and Sheep.
Need Of Export Mutton.
There is great need of really good eX-
port muttOns. especially for the Eng
fish market. and the marvel Of the
thing is that with over 60, 0OO, 900 Of
sheep in the United States it is impos-
sible to pick up a cargo Of this kind OF
stuff in any of our big markets even in
a whole weeks time. Time was when
with less than 10000, 900 sheep we
could spare the English and Scotch
markets we'll toward half a million well
fed live muttons annually, but we are
unable to do half as well now
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08
PORTLAND FAIR.

Or. coe Finally Succeeds in Securing
Recognition for the Lewis and
Clarke Centennial Exposition.
1t is not probable, under the pres
sure of other appropriations, that had
the Lewis and Clarke fair sent any
person not acquainted with the Dakota
people that they would have been
able to secure recognition at the SEES
sion of the legislature just closed here.
and in fact it is doubtful If another
mar in Oregon could have been found
who could have brought the Portland
through as DR.. Coe did.
Four times. in committee and else
where. was his measure voted down,
the last time being in the general ap-
preparation mix-up. during the last
evening of the session.
AS the major portion Of the $50, 900
finally appropriated by the bill for the
st. Louis worlds fair and the Lewis
and Clarke centennial is for the col.
lection of a large exhibit. and the bill
provides for its transfer direct from
st. Louis to Portland, the latter fair
will practically have the benefit Of not
less than $4,000 out of the general
sum appropriated.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08
PERSONAL.

Miss Bertha Whitecraft is in the city
on a visit from her school at Kershaws.
Miss Nellie Bartron returned to Val
ley City Normal school yesterday after
a brief visit at home.
Miss Minnie Larson Is again at home
having completed her course in book
keeping and typewriting at Mime
apolis.
J. M. Patterson and Alderman jaeger
drove down from Washburn and have
been interested onlookers during the
closing days Of the legislative session.
John L. Rhodes, of Dawson, was
perambulating the streets of Bismarck
yesterday, and stopped over last ever
ing to take in my Friend From
India"
Miss Edna Burge, who was assist
ant st~enOgrapher for the house during
the last session, will assume the duties
of teacher of stenography and type
writing at the Bismarck Business
school Monday morning.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08

With this issue ends the legislative
period during which the Daily Tribune
has been sent to over 1000 citizens of
the state, largely at the instance Of
members Of the legislature who de-
sired that their constituents should
keep posted on the proceedings. The
compliments paid The Tribune for its
fairness and reliability are as crafty.
ing az they are numerous and 1t is
with pardonable pride that The Trib-
une refers to this matter.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08
Up.to.Date Methods.

We lead where others follow, be-
cause we are up-to-date masters OF
the t~onso-ial art. Therefore for an
easy shave call and see Lavine & De
Mars. under the new management In
the Grand Pacific Hotel barber shop,
without The use Of any coacain solu-
tor or other anaesthetic preparation.
instead of antiseptics we Use clean.
sterilized linen with every shave to
keep the face clean and free from
those dis%comforting skin diseases. We
also furnish regular customers with
individual shaving mugs free. We
make a specially Of face massage,
using WHIST is known as Pomp-eine
face cream and skin food. 1t is ap-
piled TO the patient here by two ex-
pert workmen, known to the public
as Lavine & De Mars, doing business
in the Grand Pacific Hotel barber
shop. Private room. in connection for
ladies' hair dressing and massage
work. pomp.eine properl: applied re-
moves freckles, blackheads. pimples.
moth tan, sunburn, chapped face and
hands. It is the most delightful prepa.
ration Of its kind now in use. Give us
a TRIAL.
LAVINE & DE MARS.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08
NORTH DAKOTA EDITORS.

They Are Given a Big Time on the
Occasion Of Their Visit to Los
Angeles.
North Dakota editors have been hav-
ing the time of their lives at Long
Beach on the Pacific. The trip was
taken from Los Angeles through the
courtesy of the Pacific Electric rail-
way, and the Dakotans were met by
the Long Beach board of trade. A
Los Angeles Herald artist caught
several Of the editors in characteristic
poses and tells this good one on Ed
Smith:
Zone of the sights of the trip was
jolly Ed Smith. editor of the Devils
Lake Free Press. standing on the
edge of the water with a big clam in
each hand asking for instructions on
how to make a clam live out of water,
and whether it would bite No one
being able to answer his questions,
he logged his bivalves back to Los
Angeles and rushed up to Frank Wig
gins Immediately on his return, ask
ing to be instructed on the habits of
the clam. Frank Virgins knows about
most things from the frOstless belt to
WHY Altl60tlOn 40 SuRCi Y q uSPCAu
n C on fleeing storms, but he had
urgent business in another part of the
building when the clam question was
passed to him. Mr.. Smith was asked
how it happened he was defeated re-
Gently when he ran for county audi
tor. AS he pushed his 42-degrees-
below cap down over his head a little
farther, he remarked with a grin that
he guessed he didn't get all the votes
he bought.
"E. M. Crary. of the Edmore Herald
of Edmore, is the wit of the party and
makes things scintillate when there is
any danger of their becoming dull.
Frank A. Wilson. of Bathgate. is
the only democrat in the party. but
says he rather enjoys the novelty. as
he is in good company. Mr.. Wilson
is editor of the Pink Paper. This
paper says Mr.. Wilson. is the only
n in the country besides the Police
Gazette that is published on pink pa
per. I started it just for a novelty.
but it took SO we'll that l kept it w
This climate is so warn that Mr.. viii
son forgets that he will ever again
need an overcoat and he insists on
leaving 1t behind him. Some member
of the party is usually seen bringing
up the real with Wilson's coat. He
nearly lost it yesterday, but acknowl-
edged that he had lost a Charley boy
n in San Francisco of which he was
real proud.
Colonel Grant S. Hager. executive
committeeman. is editor Of the st.
Thomas Times and one Of the most
capable newspaper men in the party.
mi. l.. Ayers of the Dickinson
Press Is looking for some one to lick
him again since an insurance man of
his W town took ar opportunity to
drub him. Ayers retaliated by putting
out OF business the company of which
the man was agent"
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08
cRlrreNroN CIRCLE work.
Thanks Extended For Aid Rendered
to the Crittenton Circle.

Thanks Extended For Aid Rendered
to the Crittenton Circle.
The superintendent Of the Florence
C%rittenton home wishes to publicly
acknowledge and express her sincere
gratitude to the friends who during
the past two weeks. have SO generous
ly contributed to the necessities of
the home:
Mrs. Leslie. cash. soc: Mrs. Nc
Gowan. dishes. etc., 81; Mrs. Faunce,
soap, towels. bedspreads, etc. $3.50:
Ladies' Benevolent Aid society, three
comforters, S.: Mrs. Eppinger and
Miss Nathan. sheeting and pillow
casing, $500; Mrs. M. j. Mckenzie.
two comforters. 81; Mrs. Wilcox. cake
and cream; Madames A. Will and
Beers, preparing two comforters.
We are glad to be able to report
an increasing interest and that the
work is now in a prosperous condition.
A conference on The Best Meth
DDS of Conducting Rescue Work" will
tenton mission from March IL to 16.
1903. at the Mother Mission. 21-23
Blocker street. New York City.
The various home, numbering Ga.
under this organization will furnish
delegates. and an interesting program
will be presented.
Prominent persons in philanthropic
work will speak.
The many problems which arise in
rescue work will be solved. and multi
tudes of new thoughts and methods,
progresses and successes will be re
lated.
A reception win be rendered to the
delegates to the conference and the
Christian Workers Of New York City
Some of the subjects to be discussed
| are: Mother and Child in the Institu
tion;" Duties of Matrons," and many
others Of Importance to those. who
would make successful workers In
rescue work.
This conference will commemorate
the twentieth anniversary" Of The
opening of the first Florence Critten
ton mission.
All interested in reform work ant
the uplifting Of humanity are cordially
invited to be present.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08
The Stomach 10 the Man.

A weak stomach weakens the man,
because it cannot transform the food
he eats into nourishment. Health and
strength cannot be restored to any
sick man or weak woman without first
restoring health and strength to the
stomach. A weak stomach cannot
digest enough food to feed the tissues
and revive the tired and run down
limbs and organs Of the body. Kodcl
Dyspepsia Cure cleanses, purifies
sweetens and strengthens the glands
and membranes Of the stomach, and
cures indigestion. dyspepsia and all
stomach troubles. E. G. Patterson 4
Co.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08
A Remarkable Case.

One of the most remarkable cases Of
a cold, deep-seated on the lungs, caus-
ing pneumonia, is that Of Mrs. Ger
trude e. Fenner, Marion, Ind, who was
entirely cured by the use Of One Min
ute Cough Cure. She says: "The
coughing and straining SO weakened
that l run down in weight from 148
to 80 pounds. tried a number of rem
edies to no avail until I used One
Minute Cough Cure. Four bottles of
this wonderful remedy cured me en-.
tirely of the cough. strengthened my
lungs and restored me to my normal
weight, health and strength" E. G,
Patterson & Co.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08

MUM. A number Of intending pas
train there and avoid the rush at the
station here. When the train pulled
out, there were goOd-byes said and the
session was owe indeed.
An Excellent Play-Those who did
not attend the performance Of my
Friend From India" at the Atheneum
last night missed an excellent per.
Torrance. The company was a well
balanced n and presented a first
class play full of fun and amusement
and good, clean comedy was the order
of the evening. John F. Ward, as
Erastus Underholt and Frank Parry as
A keene Shaver, were especially good.
The feminine interpretations were also
good and the evening was an enjoyable
one.
Offers to compromise-The Record
says that Attorney Baker, of Detroit
Mich, offers to compromise his suit
against Emmons county for a consider
alton of about 500; each side to pay
it own costs. The proposition will
probably be accepted, as It is likely
that Mr.. Baker would get that much
on appeal. besides the additional costs
that the county would have to pay.
Mr.. Kerr, the N. p. attorney who Is
acting for the county, is said to ad.
wise compromise.
Founded on Beer keqs-Emmons
County Record: Here's another Incl.
dent that shows clearly the drawbacks
Of prohibition. At Hague. a new EN-.
mons county town. on the Milwaukee
extension. a substantial little building
just erected has four-gallon beer kegs
for a foundation. OF course, as this
ia a prohibition state, the kegs were
brought in empty; whereas, under IL
cense, they would have contained
beer, which being sold, would have
provided a local supply OF kegs fol
foundation purposes at q lesser price
Did Some eusiness-The Valley City
Times Record says: Several weeks
ago an agent for a st. Paul liquor
house canvassed the territory adjacent
to Valley City, and as the result OF q
weeks work 1t is stated that he took
out orders for about 1900 worth Of
booze. The sales made were mostly
Of whiskey in quantities Of n to hve
gallons. The goods came c. o. d. by
express and have already been deliv
cred. There isn't any moral or sermon
connected with this incident-f
simply illustrates the fact that pro
hibition hasn't destroyed the appetite
for liquor.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08
POPE LEO BETTER.
But Not Vet Restored to His Normal
Condition.

Rome. March ALI the sensational
reports circulated regarding the health
Of the pope are unfounded. Although
his holiness is not yet restored to his
normal condition. he is better than he
was Thursday. SO much so. that he
gave his usual audience to Cardinal
Rampolla and later had a conference
with the secretary OF Italy.
Although Pope Leo did not attend
the usual lenten sermon preached in
the vatican before the cardinals and
bishops. he has been sitting up all day
and his cold has almost entirely dis.
appeared.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08
TRADE REVIEW.
General Conditions Reported Favorable
in the Main.

"'S ''&'
New York. March 1.-THE r. G..
Dun company's weekly review OF trade
says:
Further improvement in the move
ment OF freight and fuel makes the
general situation more favorable, al
though shippers are still constantly
complaining and pig iron furnaces arc
not able to run steadily. Numerous
labor struggles also interrupt. manu-
featuring. yet mills and shops are pro-
ducing freely as a rule. Jobbers and
wholesalers are busy, while spring re.
tail trade has opened very we'll in
many lines. notably wearing apparel.
Permits for building operations show
large gains w last years figures.
giving additional strength to lumber
and other materials. Prices OF com
modities scarcely altered in the ag-
gregate during February. Foreign
trade continues very heavy"
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08
LAvINE & DE MARS.
The Bismarck Business School.

Now is a good time to enter the
Bismarck Business school. Day and
evening sessions. Full business ana
shorthand courses. Special penman'
ship classes. Call and see the r
We DO. Band hall, corner 5th street
and Broadway.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08
Meeting Of Teachers.

The next regular teachers examina-
ton for Burleigh county will be held
at the court house on Friday and Sat
urday, March IL and IA. 1903. Elk
animation will begin promptly at
a. m.
NELLIE G.. EVARTS.
County Superintendent of Schools.
Bismarck. N. D., March (, 1903.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08
The CITY
n WEATHER.

Maximum temperature Yesterday 10.
Minimum temperatureyesterday II.
Forecast for North Dakota for the
t~wenty-f0ur hours ending tonight at
8 o'clock:
Fair weather Sunday; stationary
temperature.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08
ACHIEVES ANOTHER SUCCESS
Minister Powell Obtains Withdrawal
Of Decree In San Domingo.

Santo Domingo. March 7.-United
States Minister Powell has achieved
another in obtaining from the
Dominican government the withdraw.
al OF the decree lowering the port
charges which seriously affected the
interests OF the Clyde steamship lines.
Minister Powell has steadfastly main
tanned that injustice was shown to
American interests and he demanded
that the government should faithfully
keep It's engagements.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08

MeneIsk May Revisit Europe.
King Menelek of Abyssinia has ex.
pressed a desire to revisit the capitals
Of Europe.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08
CHURCH ANNOUNCEMENTS.

PROTESTANT EPISCOPAL
Church Of St. George. Rector Rev. A. A. Joss.
Morning service at 10:45: Sunday school ~
O'Clock. No evening service.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08
Alabastine.

will sell until March Is. at 40c per
peck, regular price SOC. Get it now II
you are to use it this spring.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08

Lumber enclosing ice rink for sale
A bargain for any one desiring to
build. See Tom Mccormick or f. e.
Robideau.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08
Object Of Admiration.

Last week people praised Mr.. Rookie
Teller for . great educational project
he planned. Yesterday the Standard
Oil company made the largest single
advance IN prices known for years,
netting the trust $4,000. 900. What .
system-what Q beautiful system
New York Telegram.
Wall Paper! Wall Paper!
Have q new line on hand a
Faunce's corner. Call and see MI
and get prices.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08

Regular MeetIng-A regular meeting
of Rebekah lodge No. 40 was held
last evening. Mrs. Nellie Everts was
Initiated. Lunch was served and .
pleasant time enjoyed.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1903-03-08

Rev. strachan Improving = Rev.
Strachan, of the M. e. church. has
gained steadily since going south.
One lung Is entirely well and the
other is making progress.