Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1903-10-28

IL.
Naggsby-I thought you were never
going to work for those people again
Waggsby-I did say so. But since that
time they have decided that might come
back.-Baltimore American.
Whats this?' screamed the tank
drama actor My pay is 81 short.'
Eight baths at so certs,'' blandly re-
piled the manager. six nights and two
matineeS. Newark News.
The Real Trouble.
'TiS not because they ask so much
Our children bore US so,
But that they always ask about
So much Go not know.
Philadelphia Public Ledger
Papa-See here, Willie, you mustn't
bother me- When / was a little boy |
didn't bother my papa with questions
Nllhe-Maybe II you had, pa you, be
able TO answer mine '-Philadelphla
Ledger.
do you believe In luck?"
Sometimes See that fat woman with
the red hat ever there!
Yes"
'@Twenty-two years ago she refused %
marry me.'-Tit-Bits
Bobby-Do l have to go to school
again, mother!
Mether-Of course, Bobby.
Bobby-Why, mother, [ heard YOU fell
father last night that l knew entirely
too much.-DetroIt Free Press.
Stage Manager ito lessee of theater) =
Our scene shifter wants a holiday He
SAYS he hasn't been away for three years
Lessee Well, tell him he cannot have
one. He gets change of scenery enough
for amybody--New York Daily News.
The Wheel Of Fortune.
The Wheel of Fortune built for HE,
md also, friends for you
Is Just the Wheel of Industry
To put cur shoulders to.
philadelphia Press.
willie Waite's uncle can make him DO
anything he wants him to DO"
His uncle must be. a man of great
will power
Yes, indeed He can VIII half a mil
lion dollars at least "-Philadelphl
Press
Look at the rakish way that young
turkey gobbler is strutting around these
days. remarked the duck Yes re-
near Thanksgiving time, you know"
What has that to Go with it, why,
you see, he wants to appear tough. =
Philadelphia Press.
Spellbinder-Yes, my friends, eternal
vigilance is the price Of liberty! BE on
your guard; a word to the wise is suffi-
Gent
Voice from the audier ce-Then you
must take us for gol-darn fools! You
have been talking for an hour and half.
Kansas City Journal.
Mrs. Hornihand-It beats all how
many Of these here actors git lntew pub
lie life after awhile. Farmer Hornihand
What got thet inter yer head? Mrs.
Hornihand-W' I see here ev'ry day in
so. Actin Guv'nor so-an'so,' an all
that. "-Baltimore American.
The Bride-I told hubby I was going
to give him something of my own cook
ing, and he said I'd better try it on the
dog first. Wasn't that a cruel sugges-
ton?
Her Boston Friend-Very! And l
thought your husband was SO fond of
dogs!-San Francisco Wasp.
Clerkley-Isn't this earlier than your
usual time for going home?
Barhley-Yes, but my wife said if [
came out by the 3:45 she'd meet me with
the carriage.
II didn't know you kept horse and
carriage
''Er-er-it's a baby and carriage >
New York Daily Times.
Johnny" said fond Germantown
mother to her young hopeful the other
day after she had returned home from
calling on a neighbor, someone has tax
en- a big piece of frosted cake out Of the
pantry Johnny blushed guilty. ooh,
johnny she exclaimed. Il didn't think
it was in you!" 1T amt all" whined
the boy. Part of it is in sister Nellie.-
Philadelphia Ledger.