Evening journal., 1903-08-05
CAUGHT ATRANDOM


why" asked the good Samaritan,
do you permit your wife to take in
washingT
Il wouldn't" answered the man who
was born tired, "6nly,she needs the
money to support the familyr
Dobbs-Are the Higgses friendly
neighbors?
Mrs. Dobbs-well, they borrow free
ly. but they seem a little stiff about
lending.
She-The way to a mans heart is
through his stomach.
He-Possbly that's why so many
poor devils have dyspepsia.
stella-what happened after they
broke the ice?
Bella-It melted.
The statistician who finds that dur
ing the past year thirty-eight drunken
men killed forty-one sober men in In
dian Territory knows how TO preach Il
temperance sermon.
It's terrible TO have a New England
capacity for worriment. The Boston
Herald is now talking about the proba-
BILE fatalities of next Fourth Of July.
The great number of Massachusetts
women who prefer work to marriage
would rather support one person than
two, perhaps.
Atyron 7. Herrick the Republican
candidate for the GovernorshiD of Ohio,
was born. says the CincinnatiP Enqui-
rer in log cabin. We are left to in
fer that his statesmanlike qualities
stop there.
Even the Kansas girls made the East
ern college boys look like 'quitters' in
the wheat fields. The college boys sus-
pected that harvesting was work, and
not a game.
The Dowager Czarina Marie, mother
Of the Car, has completed arrange
ments for a Children's World Exhibi-
ton to be held In st. Petersburg in No
vember next. The fair will be interna-
tional in character. including scientific
and industrial exhibits.
only three of the famous Electora
Commission of 1877 survive, ex-Sena.
tor Edmunds, Senator Hoar and Gen.
eral Eppa Hunton, of Virginia. OF th'
five Smeme Court Justices on the boarC
all are dead Justice Strong having beer
the last survivor.
Senator Clark. Of Montana, has jus
left Paris for the Pyrennes. Befor
starting he said in am interview; 50
shall reach home in September Th
depression in the copper market is du
to over production, in connection Wit
other contributory causes, among whicl
possibly is the agitation for universe
peace. But personally do not believ
( affect armaments. Uses for guns Wi
that inter- parliamentary agitation Wi
always be found"
A firm in Northfeld, VT, has jus
completed a monument Of light grant
for the grave of the late Rear Admire
Sampson in the National Cemetery a
Washington.
Prof. Paine. of Harvard, will be th
a delegate Of the university at the un
yelling Of the Wagner monument
Berlin next October. Andrew Carneg
= will represent st. Andrew uhlNerslI
= of Glasgow.
stella-They're going 20 investiga'
- the post-Ofiice.
Bella-rm glad TO hear II. l g
= only three love letters from Jack q
day. and I'm sure there must be som'
= thing wrong.
y y A book Of verses underneath II
I, bough;
!, He wore golf coat. too. a dad'
COW
. Strayed where he was-he woke out
the road
But knew not when he landed the
= nor how.
TO After the grating exposures in Z
x New York labor unions, the boys
I'd the street when they wish TO insult o
Id OF their fellows call him "a walki
he delegate"
The BARRIERS unions have decid
that union BARRIERS. and not underta
ers' helpers. shall shave corpses.
the interest OF peace, we say let th'
lis have the Job.