Sequachee Valley news. (Sequachee [Sequatchie], Tenn.) 1896-1952, 1903-10-22
SCIENTIFIC RESEARCH
It's Effects on Our Modern
Ways.
OUR ANCESTRAL EVOLUTION
Thank God for Microbes i'll
Water and Snakes in Cab
bage Says Peter Hauch.
OUR ANCESTRAL EVOLUTION
My deer brethren:

I" hSSi OAOhhA'h'
That feller tha call science is a
nifty big man. He is whale, he
is an ellyphunt. Words is inade-
quate &c express his nifty deeds.
JerusauIn! Jes' look what strides
he has made in the last fu years
Among the many great discoveries
is the Mike Robe. 1t is surprising
how our lourfathers and our four
mothers maid out. The men would
take ther axes q dive inter the for
est & fell trees, an then wade mud
and water to dyke off the ponds.
not knowing there was ANYTHING
worse than snakes am ticks when
ther were mikerobes Iurkin in the
water and on the land, fur tina ar
amphibious animals And our
four mothers would take ther dirty
close and ther dirty kids to the
branch, roll her sleeves above the
elbows and tuck her skirts at the
waste and wash iur hours, while
the kids played in the branch or in
the dirt, not dreamin' of mikerObe.
II Il kid turned white around the
mouth or had irightful drems thay
woulk give gerusalemoke seed, and
if one had collie tha would resort to
catnip or TO colamus, and if any
NV the family took cold there was
boneset or horehound There was
families from nineteen down who
TOUCHED it from three to eighty or
ninety years. but tina knowed lit
tie about science. When tina got
got hump shouIderrd tha called
that stopped with age. Poor igno.
rent critters, tina did not know that
ther systems wuz comp etelY satur.
ated with mikerobes, an that tha
wuz toten millions NV EN-.
! doubt whether tina would no
mikerobe if tha wuz to meet one in
the rode. Tha wuz thankful fur
the cool, clear, sparklln' water that
gushed from the earth, the beverage
prepared by God himself to nour-
ish and invigorate his creatures
and to beautify his footstool. Tha
noed tha wuz insects in the water
and that tha accumulated as the
water got older, but gulped it down
and lived on.
We have been taught better by
science The country is flooded
with pretty, sweet, smart. fat bab-
les, but the doctors tell them to be
careful and bile all the water, and
sterilize their food an playthings,
which keeps the parents in ner.
vous dread for fear little mike will
tote baby off. But the babe is not
bothering over anything in partic>
ular.
If our four fathers had noed oi
the existence of little mike, their
days would have been numbered
twenty or thirty years sooner on
account OF the worry.
Before l close | wish to say sum-
thin about cabbage, although ms
be DEPRESSING from my pint. By
: accident and not by science snakes
are found in our cabbage, some
thing any fool can see. Cabbage
a vegetable we were won't TO make
50 many dishes Nv What are w
to do? Science would say "Bil,
. them cabbage down. That's wha
we do, yet there's death in tn,
pot"
= Bro. Morris. al the Pikeville Ban
n ner, is an old timer, and not afraiC
o Of boogers, He eats them-cabbag
| mean-snd will even take then
\ on subscription.
d suppose we ought to bs thank
y ful for the progress Of science, an
n indeed give thanks in everything
Thank God for water with mike
4 rob,s and for cabbagps with snak,
in them To kill US. | don't ku