The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1903-02-13
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10 rae IN automobiles as to be in front
of them. This may bring reform. ---Ex.;
Culture: Ruth-Mr. jenkins has such
an air of culture, hasn't he? Tom
Oealous)-Hum- yes, agriculture kan
sas City Journal. -, /. S...5s. Il I. z
Defined and Described: Teacher
What is farm? Bright Little Girl
A piece of land entirely covered BY a
neutrality-suspicious. Free Press. 49,.
Teaching Him: Toni can read
your thoughts.' Clara-I can hardly
believe it, for if you could you wouldn't
sit SO far away.-1ndianapolis Jour-
nal.
Fully Covered: A woman on the
death Of her husband telegraphed to 2
Instant friend: Dear Joseph is dead
Loss fully covered by insurance. '-rit-
Bits.
All Hers: ''Ah, but, count" she
cried, do you love ME for myself
alone" YES" he replied, "you are
your fazaire's only child. "-Chica 90
Times-Herald
Little Wille-Say, pa, what's an ego
list: Pam egotist, my son. is a man
VINO tells you those things about him.
SER which You intended to tell him
about yourself.-Chicago News.
instructor Gin despair)-Wen, at least
you can tell ME where the MAGMA
Charta was signed? Student Cheer
1uliy)-Oh, yes! King John signed that
at the bottom.-Harvard Lampoon.
Sure enough: Little Elmer-pana.
what is the hand Of providence? Pro-
lessor Broadhead-The hand of provi-
tlence' my son, is what We usually see
IN the misfortunes of others.-Puck.
Bridget, did you hear the beil?"
"1es-sum." why don't you 20 to the
door, then?" 'Sure, mum, I'm nor OK
pectln' amy one. 1t must be some
body to see you. baltimore Herald.
10 Remove the Shells: Mrs. New
wed Cat dinner)-Mandy, why do you
serve nutcrackers with the turkev2
Mandy-Well, yo' done tole me to stuff
de turkey wit chestnuts.-Detroit Free
Press.
TOMMY think mamma is an awful
gossip. Ethel-Oh, Tommy! how can
You say such thing? Tommy--Wcll.
She IS; everything 1 do she Immediate
~ goes and tells papa. 1 hate gossip.
-Tit-Bits.
Il see Newlywed at the Country
Club quite often since his baby came.
thought he was firmly anchored to
home life" He was, but ut the
first squall he began to drag his an
chor."-Puck.
Optional: do you have to ask YOUR
wife for money!" faltered the little
man with the hunted look in his eyes.
Not on your life!' replied the large.
brusque man; "but rather than 90
without, l sometimes dov'-Detroit
Journal
A Hardship of Modern War: She
The strain on the soldier in modern
warfare must be very great. He-It
is. Sometimes the photographer isn't
ready, and you have to wait hours.
and then the pictures may prove fail
ures.-Judge.
Early lessons in ornitholosy: Souire
Ito rural 1ad)-New, my boy, tell me
how do you know an old partridge
from young one? Boy-By teeth, sir.
squire-Nonsense, boy! You ought to
know better. A partridge hasn't got
any teeth Boy-No, sir; but have
Punch.
An enthusiastic sightseer III London
was telling her friend that she had
been fortunate enough to get a good
view Of Lord Kitchener. "Ah," said
the friend, Il suppose he is very
bell1eose man?" "Oh, no. was the
reply, "quite slim assure you."-Chi-
cago News.
Mother-You naughty boy! You've
been fighting. Little Son-No, mother.
Mother-How did your clothes get torn
and your face get scratched? Little
Son-l was trying to keep bad boy
from hurting good little boy. Mother
That was noble. Who was the good
little boy? Little Son-Me.-Pittsbur
Bulletin.
Answered by telephone: Parker
What's wrong, You seem worried.
Streeter-I am. wrote two notes.
one to my broker asking him If he took
me for a fool, and the other to Miss
Golding asking her If she would be
mine. While was out somebody
tclephoned Yes and don't know
which of 'em it was:-C Chicago News. J
would you advise me to read The,
V!rginian'?" the fair young girl looked
I'D and asked him. 'Not YETI" he
gravely replied; always wait until a
book has been on the market for q
full year and half before you read
it, A little later he murmured softly
to himself: ''By that time I may be
able to get her copy for IS cents"
For, in addition to giving sage advice.
he was not averse to turning an hon
est penny.-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
A stylishly dressed woman entered a