The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1903-12-31

dulHlTe SELF control. l would
kE1e4SJ rather do foolish thing
v&9&2 calmly than make the wisest
possible decision by accident in state
OF mental confusion. This preference
for rational conduct asserted itself
strongly while I was eating breakfast
on the train. Having finished the meal,
l lit cigar in the smoking compart-
ment and sat down to think the thing
OUT
It is possible to be mistaken about
the functions Of the brain. The brain
possesses a nominal authority. 1t is
the pilot and the heart is the engineer.
The pilot rings the bell. but he doesn't
stop the machinery. AS it usually
stops at his command, he grows into
the pleasing belief that he controls it.
Then comes the sad and awful day
when he rings one bell to slow down,
another to stop and two to back, but
the wheels 60 on turning full speed
ahead. 1t is no use swearing down the
speaking tube, my friend. If there's
no response to the bell, talking won't
mend matters. Keep cool and enjoy
the smash up. 1t is going to be a good
one. And hang on to the wheel. Though
the craft be running away, you may be
able to pick out a soft spot in the rocks.
This crude little allegory will serve
as a description of my entire day on
that train. I couldn't stop the emo
tional part Of my nature. 1t had new
hQh0UnH T ho1 1,,+
upon several occasions that I was be-
coming too much interested, and some
times I had rung the bell a little late,
but there had been no disasters. This
time there was one in plain sight, right
ahead. For it was a perfect certainty
that if I should meet Sibyl while my
heart was in this condition I should
wreck every mutual prospect Of our
lives.
1t would be grossly unfair to her
Beyond doubt she must know of my
fathers wish, and no stretch of mod
esty could blind me to the fact that
she must be in some small degree ia
vorably disposed toward me- Other
wise she would have checked my ia
theirs hopes. I could not think of Sibyl
as humbly subservient in such a mat
ter. So far as could remember her at
all, it seemed to me that as child she
had exhibited a remarkable strength
and evenness of purpose. My father
would be the last man in the world to
break the will Oh eradicate the individ-
uality Of any child in his care He
was one who would read natures plan
and accept it for the best, striving only
to see that it should be perfectly car
ried out. SO Sibyl would be girl with
q mind of her own.
She must remember me, Of course,
far better than remembered her l
had changed somewhat to the eye, but
the alteration was a vast improvement.
She had been a keen child by all that
my father used to tell me about her.
No doubt she knew me very we'll. 1t
was fair to assume that | must in some
way have impressed her favoraDly, 50
that she could think Of me with no
very great rebellion when my father
talked Of me to her. Really it was hard
no other. Perhaps the child remember
ed how l used to sing to her one sum-
mer when [ was at home for a week or
two. She must have been 10 years old
then, and she was very fond of music
must have been, indeed, to stand my
singing for two or three hours at a
stretch in the dark drawing room Of
nm evening. 1t was always dark, for
the child said that a light spoiled mu-
sic for her. In reality she was BASH
full and afraid that l would look at
her, afraid that I would see the tears
she shed at sentimental songs. I was
singing heart breakers that summer,
having suffered some slight damage in
the matter of young lady who mar
l1ed another fellow
All of which is merely to say that
Sibyl must have reconciled herself to
me as a manifest destiny and that it
would be utterly impossible for me to
reconcile myself to her while my heart
was raging for Anna Lamoine. l should
inevitably dislike her, especially as she
could have no strong personal attrac-
ton, no charm to catch the eye. If she
had possessed physical beauty, meeting
her might well have set me right, for
beauty counts at the start, and quail
ties are so slow.
l had no doubt that she was a splen-
did woman in all that makes a soul
more luminous than the dull average.
My father was sure of it, and really in
all this internal struggle was greatly
influenced by his opinion. If he be-
neved that Sibyl was the ideal woman
for me, she probably was. That's the
fact about it, and l never quite let 20
of that conviction. But that was in my
head; my heart had a conviction of it's
own, which was that stood upon the
verge Of an awful mistake; my heart
was afraid. 1t said to me: What are
you doing here? Go find Anna La
moline. You have chance now. Why
did she run away from New York as
soon as you had told her, in effect, that