The Birmingham age-herald., 1903-08-02
Reflections of ChameS

has no good air down deir throats, but New Workers won't stand for 1t. Dey'd radder stand up. Any way, what's de use getting under ground till you has a long call? Tunnels is all right to get to Lone- lyville in time to mow de grass before de sun goes down, but for folks what isn't farmers-nit!
 If you listen to some folks dere isn't many New Workers left, and dey is chasing deirselves under de No children" rule.
 I wonder dat President Teddy didn't knock New York flats when he was swinging his hammer about dere not being enough gold spoon kiddies growing up to make republican voters in de sweet Summer time dat's to come? It isn't because a mug has been to school to Harvard dat he doesn't raise kiddies: it's because de flats has put de dead line on kids.
 Light airy dog kennels on de roof, wit all de comforts of home for poodles. Children not al- lowed" is de way de swell fiat passes out de law desc days. Oats what's putting de cradle makers out of business. I taut it was be- cause de kiddies distoibed de jan itors' afternoon maps, but Duch- ess tips me straight dat's it's be- cause kiddies pull de ears of poo dies, dat de kiddies is kept in Heaven, instead of in Harlem.
 hears Whiskers and MT. Paul talking about it de odder day, and, say, honest, 1 says to meself dere's so few of us left we ought to come high.
 ITO be sure," Whiskers was saying, "dere is few New Workers left, but what bodders me to make out is what New Workers do."
 Mostly dey does de rest of de country" says MT. Paul.
 "Not even dat" Whiskers says, "if I understand you. For instance, de big banks"
 De kind dat Is raided, or de kind dat raids?" butts in MT. Paul.
 "Bote kinds," Whiskers says. Most of our big banks, Is run by men who come here from de prov inces."
 Oats dude langwudge for long grass.
 Besides de banks" Whiskers goes on, "our hotels, insurance companies, municipal officies and odder money-making institutions is run by formers from over de sea, or beyond de Bronx. What do New Workers do, asks your"
 Well" says MT Paul, "I see dat you will be answered. Some New Workers go to South Dakota, and some to Newport; but de main push goes to de races if dey Is sporty, or to New Jersey eff dey is domestic. We Is mostly too strong to woik, and too bored to see dat we gets fair deal; so farmers from de tall timber comes in and rakes off de pot, kitty and percentage. Derefore de city Is going to de dogs as fast as it can find kennels to hold itself. Strang- CTS in New York is de only ones dat gets any good out of de city. All dat most New Workers gets out of de city Is deir trunks"
 But we should stop in New York" says Whiskers, getting a mad on.
 "We would stop in de city and browse if we had de run of de pasture, but we refuses to be stalled" says MT. Paul.
 "Nonsense!" says Whiskers. We has underground rapid tram sit almost ready" "Chames," says Mir. Paul, joining to me, you has been seeing de city-how is rapid transit going on?"
 Its getting on so swift" I says, "dat if dey don't take wrap in de reins, and pull up bit," says, "dere Is babes alive at dis very minute dat will live to see day. light" says, "and some of em may take a ride on de loop" l says.
 Whats dat about a loop?" he