The Intermountain Catholic. (Salt Lake City [Utah] ;) 1899-1920, 1903-05-02
oRAToRICAL MIsHAPs.
Flights and Falls of Men Who Are
Apt to Talk Too Fast.
Nondon Tit-Rits.l

Oondon Tit-Bits)
There probably always will exist the
orator who as the humorist once OBJ
served served cannot open his mouth without
delegate at trade union congress at
Leeds, who the other day declared that
by securing adequate labor representa-
ton we shall no longer let the tail
tails"
But after all, this gentleman was at
least as happy in his oratory as a GER
tain well known Irish member of mar
Lament who recently closed an eloquent
speech in Connaught in this brilliant
fashion,: The blaze that is lighted here
today will not be .quenehed till it spreads
wave of indignation over the land which
will bring the bigoted directors to their
knees. :"
The mayor of provincial town no
doubt meant to be very complimentary
when, H. welcoming the representatives
of trade union, he said with the
hammer of unity you have welded your
selves into one harmonious whole, and
SO produced the cream OF perfection. -
Even the august chamber of the lords
is by no means free from these rhetorical
vagaries, for did not noble lord, when
defending his class, recently remark: rs
it not right that, in order to hand down
to posterity the virtues of those who
have been eminent for their services to
their country, their descendants should
enjoy the honors conferred on them as
IL reward Tor Sucn services!
AS I have already said all that l
wished to say an oratorial NJ p. once
declared, II willingly retract what 1 was
lust about to observe" while a fellow
countryman, after vainly resisting the
temptation to join in debate. opened
his speech with the startling statement:
II can't keep silent ANY longer without
saying a few words.
There was more than a little ambiguity
in the speech of the man who referred
to some tattle which we have seen in
some sly corner where no one has been
but ourselves" but this is lucidity it
self compared with the speech of the
American aspirant to congress- who com
pared the opposition to some Haunting
vessel sailing proudly on in ignorance
of the hidden reef that should tear the
them bowling back to their lairs, the
mockery and derision of the world"
This is no doubt excellent rhetoric but
it must pale it's Intellectual fires before
that of member of the Louisiana house
of representatives when he referred to
1.-THE need of legislation to ameliorate the
condition of our own people in the RI
parian districts, that have been SO re-
Gently visited by inundation and over
flow and devastation by almighty flood.
that has swept animated and inanimated
matters and objects before it in it's
voluminous march,; after which he
when man spoke nervously to man, and
the destiny of their great nation was
hung in Atlas scales and the balance
was equipoised and the gods suspended
Judgment other than the arbitration of
the sword. and this mighty nation APP
pealed to the Courts of Mar. and Mar
went forth from his dark chamber to
redden the world with a sanguinary
gore
From such dizzy height as this it is
quite a relief to turn to the simple con-
fession of the speaker who, when he
wati assured by the chairman that the
21l61nnnR welcomed Irrifh ha WI
est pleasure, answered: II am always
glad to be here, or indeed-er-anywher
else,
The British lion'' exclaimed ono ratri-
otto orator, whether it is pacing the
deserts of Africa, sits throned among the
SHOWS of Canada, or roams the iungles
of torrid India. is not the animal TO draw
in its horns and seek safety in its shell:
but, with the keen eye of the eagle and
the wary crouch of the leopard. 1t is all
ways ready to pounce on its enemies and
hurl them to destruction"
If this orator was a little confused in
his SMILES he had a worthy companion
in the American politician who spoke of
the treachery of an opponent who would
take my hand in both of his in the .simu-
lated grasp of warm friendship and with
Judas smile would stab me in the back
with the other thus clearly showing
what clever and dangerous man his
adversary was.
The Irish people, Mr.. D once said,
had seen their country in rags and mis-
cry. their children going to destruction
and themselves filling paupers' graves
but no. mans hand had been raised to
save them. while they had been ex-
asperated to crime and had ended their
days on the gallows" AS witty M P.
observed Men who after seeing them
selves in their graves. can survive to
qualify for the gallows certainly deserve
a better fate
It was at least generous of a certain
well known politician to declare that
such prejudice as / have against the
member is all in his favor"
although he should not have spoiled this
amicable concession by continuing: And
| am bound to express my surprise when
! heard him treat my remarks on a
silence : - -