The semi-weekly messenger. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1897-1908, 1903-08-07
REFLECTIONS OF CHAMES. :
As to New York and &c" lurAeis, That Are and
Are ~
By EDWARD w. TOWNSEND.

sey if de is domestic. We is mostly too
strong to work. and TOO bored to see dat
/ We gets a fair deal: so farmers from
de tall timber comes in and rakes off
de pot, kitty, and percentage. Dere-
fore de city is going to de dogs as fast
as it can find kennels to hold itself.
Strangers in New York Is de only ones
dat gets any good ouS of de city. All
dat most New Workers gets out Of de
city is DER trunks"
But We should stop in New York"
say Whiskers, getting a mad on.
We would stop in de city and browse
If We nae de run Of De pasture, but We
refuses to be stalled" says Mr.. Paul.
Nonsense" says Wniskers. We has
underground rapid transit almost
ready" ''Chames,"s says Mr.. Paul,
toining TO me. you has been seeing de
| city-how IS rapid transit going on?"
It's getting on so swift" 1 says,
dat if dey don't take a wrap in de
reins, and pull up a Bit" 1 says, deere
is babes alive at ris very minute dat
some of en- may take a rid on de
! loop" 1 says.
What's dat about a l0op?" he says.
L tanning dDpuI 1 l I d4IS4l-
"Dey is bote ringers f. each odder."
l says. Main lines, trunk lines, side
lines, double tracks, terminals-de whole
bunch is loops when icy out of
/ de slot machines. hen de front OF
somebody's house slips into d. rapid
transit hoIe-in-de-ground de Rapid
Transit Board calls lie Rapid Transit
Mayor. and all de oddar wise mugs dat
has Rapid Transit bugs, and dey all
says let US get rapider.'
heem,sre- dlutaord Ia uoa uoa u oaoa
Sure says de Mayor. Let Us put
n De loop below City Hall
Den de Comptroller says. No ne
says, let us loop under de East River,
! I'VE times and repeat, best tree in five
TO take the money
Not d bit like it says de chief
Engineer. Let US all get t~ogedder and
loop from de old bridge to de new
bridge. wit a pretzel twist around de
StaZ Sighton building for beer
Wit dat de Brooklyn Borough Presi-
dent makes u hOller, and he says, De
foist loop-de-loop dat is TO be Topped is
to be to Williamsburg and back.
Why back?' says &c Mayor. 'Dere's
plenty of beer and teeatres in Williams
DuTS- why back! IL says.
Den dey all resolves to loop over and
Under and around ali de bridges and
rivers dere is. and de meeting ATOMS.
an reports progress. OATS de only pro-
gress dat goes ahead
Noting doing?' asks Mr.. Paul.
only loops 1 says. When all de
loops is done You can run around in
more kinds OF soicles dan dere is in a
slice of raw onion. Dare Will be tous-
and-mile tickets for sale. and you can
ride en- out to a finish. and never get
half a mile away from City Hall.
Gents dat puts UP a scream to get a
| Harlem can do as dey do now: tele-
phone to WHEY to meet EN- half way;
and dey car dine near Long Acre
Square and call it a draw. De loops is
coming for fair, but do uptown tun-
neIs, hen dey is finished, is to be cut
up into sections, and rented out for
hotel wine cellars. and Iatskillers.'"
Well. Chames." says Whiskers, after
he'd taut a while. "You don't draw
a hopeful picture
Excuse me, Sir" I says, IF it's only
hopeful pictures you're looking for II
fetch you a dope Ook o. Rapid Trans
it called Report Of Progress. Tree sure
winners wired every day ain't in ii
aIongside!"
After all" says Mr.. Paul, Il sup
pose dere isn't no longer any use fol
rapid transit out to Harlem. Years
ago. when desc tunnels was foist start
ed. folks still had TO hike out to Har-
lem to sleep. at least. Dat was before
we decided to build twenty-story hotels
o. every corner, wit . few chucked il
between for good measure.
Wit all of de middle of de city Gov
cred wit hotels dere is no more neeC
for a Harlem. dan dere is for a public
clock in de Tenderloin, where every
man has a watch and no woman care:
what time it is"
Say, when Mr.. Paul gets talking fasr
he only says woids. not sense.