Vilas County news. [volume] (Eagle River, Vilas County, Wis.) 1896-1927, 1903-12-21
The District School of spotless Town.

situation.
The District School OF SpOtless Town.
When the fall season opened, the
principal OF the District School divid-
ed the years work into eleven classes.
and asked that the head Of each de-
partment should put into verse the
first lesson of the year. The result
was very interesting. and we are glad
to reproduce it for the amusement and
instruction of our many readers.
CLASS l.
THE ALPHABET.
AN Mt head or Ma J
Can learn the Alphabet TO say,
But U IL takes the clever II
OF one who is a little wy
To & that when recited true
The Alphabet's dirty through and through
But take this Q, the Alphabet
A very thorough cleaning will get
II U will UUUU Sapolio.
For il finds dirt an EZ foe.
The Proof.
abe d efgh I jklmnopq uywx n
CLASS II.
SPELLING.
PROPER enough, no doubt. 'twould be
II you spelled cleanliness" with C.;
But better way to spell it / know
Just S-A-P-O-I@I-O.
For that famed soap doth work a spell
And leads TO Cleanliness so well
That all pronounce the two the same
Identical meaning though different name
CLASS III.
READING.
THE short word READING, If twisted, 'tis
said.
win prove we GAIN by all we've RED;
But READING is such a valued thing
Its merits I'm no EAR I'll DING.
For he on learniEgs road must lag
Who fails TO RIDE that gentle NAG.
III just point out one handy rule
You'll always find there Is a POOL
Wherever there's SAPOLIO.
And so for water need not 60!
Each combination has the same letters as
the word READING. us A POOL" has
the same letters as SAPOLIO.
CLASS ".
PUNCTUATION
WHEN you have put coal on () the fire,
Perhaps you, too. flame up with ire,
And with an exclamation mark %
Your hands are now a shade too dark
But then may come % happy thought
OF wonders which that soap has wrought,
Whose widespread use through period %
long,
Beyond ali question marks (?72D it strong.
So you ditto g. the course you always 60
And make dash - for SAPOLIO.
CLASS V.
ARITHMEIlC.
TO MULTIPLY your pleasure each day
SUBTRACT all dirt that comes your way;
But to do this, you ought to know,
You first must ADD SapOlio,
Which will DIVIDE by 3 your moil
And require but FRACTION of former
toll:
For ''the Rule Of Three" as may be seen,
Is DIRT plus SAPOLI0 equals CLEANt
GEOGRAPHY.
IN life, whatever is your SPHERE,
IT'S safe 70 STATE dirt will appear;
And this must quite annoying be,
For dirt is no delight to SEA
But though IL be piled MOUNTAIN high,
IT'S PLAIN that it viii o quickly ay,oprv
And follow what the wisest say:
And all Of them SayPOLEO,
For that makes ev'rything clean as snow.
CLASS VII
HISTORY.
WHEN crusty old DIOGENES went on q
daytime chase,
With lighted lantern held before his phfl-
OSOphic face,
He did not seek an honest man as histo-
ries declare,
But searched for a dishonest man, and
sought him everywhere.
For q dishonest grocer had palmed on On
him some soap
That failed to clean his lantern and 81
night had made him grope.
So now he sought that rascal man round
Athens, high and low.
To make the man refund the coin or give
SAPoLIO!
CLASS VIII
PHYSIOLOGY.
DO not give EAR 10 counsel bad,
For ev'ryone NOSE that makes one sad.
The worst advice that TONGUE can tell
Is, Take this soap. twill do as we'll"
Just put your FOOT down firm and
And tell the clerk his BRAIN IS wrong.
And you've experience quite in point
To put his statement OUT OF JOINT
Just NAIL his lies and let him know
Your HEART is set on SAPOLIO!
CLASS TX.
1T Is n matter OF general NOTE
That into house or FLAT will float
Dust and dirt TO take their place
In a fashion that's impOlite and BASS
For never mind how SHARP You are
Their sly invasion you cannot BAR
Unless the proper KEY you know,
Which Is, OF course, SAPOLlO-
The soap that brings you REST right
And Keeps your house or FLAT in
TUNE!
ALGEBRA.
LET Housewife equal y plus A-i-n
Let the sign for SapO1O be;
For Dirt let minus y be had; *
Then all these symbols we VIII add --
The " and minus y drop out
(As anyone can see, no doubt
And leave what must the housewife
please
The happy symbol we call ease. EE
CLASS N.
SHORTHAND.
THE cIeverest hands, both short and long,
are far too clever 10 purchase wrong;
So they buy the soap with the little short
A SOAP that dirt cannot withstand.
For the soap with stenographic speed
Is the sort OF cleaner that people need
To handily handle in handsome hands,
u.na S.nnIIn only meeLs the -n-amls-