Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1903-06-20


Wall Street: The most noted if not
the most popular watering place in the
country.-Puck.
Dyer-"Who holds the record III your
automobile clubf" Jack-"Shaffer. He
ran over Brooklyn Life
Tom-"Did she ask you if she were
the only girl you ever loved?" Jack
NO. She took it for granted
Somerville Journal
Lady Ito blind man)--"My poo. man,
what made you blindT' Tramp
Looking for work. ma'am. Cook
County Jail Journal.
Patron-"What did you say this is.
waiter?" Walter-"S strawberry short
cake, sir" Patron-"More like cake
shortberries, isn't it?"
The Englishman-"I understand you
Americans elect all your rulers by bal
lot The American "Yes--all but our
wives, Chicago News.
Williams. have you named the baby
yetW Almost We've got the two
grandmothers to agree to arbitrate the
ease. Chicago Tribune.
A public hcnefactor: Bromley seems
TO be getting rieh?' Yes, He invent
ed collar baton chaser that is q
great success. - Chicago Record Her
aid
Where's your hoy going after he
leaves the model SCHOOL," To some
school that aih't model. l guess. to
learn reading, writing, and figures -
Judge
Bacon--"Did you understand the Ian
guage when You were in Paris, last
SUMMER Egbert--"Well -- when 1
talked to myself did. "-Yonkers
Statesman.
Quite a difference: what is the diff
ference between a gown and a crea-
tionT Il can't give you the exact
figure, but it's small fortune
Chicago Post.
The Doctor You have bad cold,
MIR. Jiggs. I'll give you some pills
for it," Jiggs -"Oh, never mind, doe
Harvard Lampoon,
IIost-My wife is worrying about
there being thirteen 1T the table to-
night Guest--Superstitio Ell? Host
No; she has only a dozen silver
knives and forks.--Chicago News
Percy Miss Swectly do you think
you could be happy with a man like
me2" Miss Sweetly Well, perhaps
If he wasn't too much like your
Comic Cuts
Victim-"Ooo! Phew! You charge
double price for this kind of sham
poo don't your Barber--''Yes" Vic
tim-"So | thought, | notice that you
are making me suffer twice as much"
N. Y. Weekly.
First Citizen-"What do you think
of this idea OF an army of the unem-
ployed marching to Washington
Second Citizen-"That's nothing new.
1t happens every four years. New
York Weekly.
Remarkable woman: MY wife is
famous cook" Mullins announced.
"So?" responded Barlow, in
Eyes, sir. She concOcts
sauces that make even health foods
palatable. Life,
Housewife Nina, Is dinner not yet
ready7 We are all starving" Nina
(who is reading n novel)-"No, dinner
is not ready and 1t won't be until [
find out whether the black knight wins
that fair lady or not
Shea well-known writer says that
in order TO succeed man must be
~ per cent. backbone" He-"Oh, |
don't know. good many who have
TO arrive are 90 per cent.
check. Chicago Daily News.
rs my daughter familiar with the
great composersT' asked Mrs. Cumrox.
Madame" said the music teacher.
with look OF desperation. 'she Is not
merely familiar with them; she is inn
pertinent" Washington Star
Seemed to cover it: Architect doubt
'ully-"It seems as If there should be
on the top Of your house
when It is finished Mr. Millionaire"
Mr. Millionaire Gmeekly) Might
suggest n Chicago Record-IIer-
nd.
Brother don't you know If you
swear Mt these mules you won't go to
Daradlsef" Eyes, parsOn; but If |
lon't swear at them won't get to the
md Of the row, and that's the impor-
ant thing at present. Philadelphia
Record.
Mrs Stubb-"Let us stop at this
lotcl, Johf,." Mr. Stubb-"The one
Town the beach Is just as large" Mrs.
,ubb-"Yes, but this one has a pie
ure Of the hotel on the stationery that
overs half the envelope. Chicago
Daily News.
What's the matter? What are you
hivering aboutY demanded the first
abblt. There's a dude out there with
gum" replied the other Well, he
lCeSn't see US at all" THAT'S inst II