davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Irish standard., 1903-09-19

mo. Who is itY'
law, can't you guess who it is?"
".Tell me who you are and what you
want, please"
We'll, that's a joke on you"
'Who is speaking, anyway"
"Why, this is Caesar"
"Sncezer?'
"No! Caesar"
"WhecZer! l don't know any Whce-
Zers."
81 said Caesar"
"Gcezcr? Who in the wor-"
Caesar! CA E-S-A-R! Dadgum
YOU! Can't you hear thunder? julius
Caesar! Me! 1t! The whole thing!
Got it now? Understand who's yclp-
ing to you:"
"Yes, sire"
That sounds more like it. Pretty
state of affairs when have to identify
myself every time l want to issue an
order! Nice state of things, must
say. Now. listen"
"Ycs, sire
1--WE have just won :, great battle-''
'Grcat rattlc?'
"No! Confound your muclile-hcadcd
ears? B-a-t-t-l-c. Get that?"
"Oh battle. l thought you said--''
'Ncver mind what you thought I'm
doing the thinking for this community
just now. We've just won IL great bat
tie, and want you to put Il bulletin
on the walls of the city where every
body can see it,"
''Ycs. sire"
"Bettcr write il down now, so you'll
get it right Are you rcndy?"
eyes, SIRE"
"Wcll, say, Ncni, Vidi, Viciv"
Eyes, sir; have it. Bcany, Bidy,
Hicy."
"No no! Vcni, Vidi, Vici!"
"Shccny-" ..... ...
Great heavens! Were you never
at school! Vcni, Vidi, Wei"
"Oh! Wccny, Widy, Wicy. III go
and tell Mrs. Calphurnia-"
Here! Wait! You haven't got it
at all! l said. Veni, Vidi-"
81 have it now. Clean eye, cried
l."
Now, by the shade of Mars, this is
too much Out upon thee, dog! Would
that my fist could reach thee, even as
my voice does! Back to the woodsv'
"rcll me once again, and II
"Ill tell you to"
Here central broke in, asking
"Did you get your party:"
Then did the royal rage Of the late
| j. Caesar manifest itself, ana the telc
phone building was scattered over the
| plain. while the central girls fled
shrirking for home ana mother.
And thus it was that the DODulacC
| of Rome must needs wait until the
! SLOW feet of Il messenger brought them
the tidings Of Il great victory.
The Irish standard., 1903-09-19
Caesar and the Phone.

FLUSHED with victory, Col. Julius
Caesar left the scene of battle and
hurried to the nearest telephone booth.
"HellO, CENTRAL" he said "Give me
Rome"
"a little louder, please" said CEN
trail
"Give me ROMEw
STAND closer to the phone. put
your lips against the receiver and
speak in a firm tone" ordered central
"Think I'm going to climb into this
thing?" asked Caesar. "You connect
me with Rome, or thcre'll be another
magazine article provided for around
here, with YOU as the central illustra-
tiOn.'
Here's your party" was the only
reply.
Hello" yelled Caesar "Is this
Rome!'
"Yes."
'Gimmc the palace"
The connection was made
"Hello. Is this the palacc:"
"Yes."
"Who is this:''
''Horatins Claudius, the messenger" !"
"Hello. 'Ratius. Know who this ~
"No sir"
Guess
sr,
,"Don't YOU know my voice?"
The Irish standard., 1903-09-19

Lord Dudley, the mayor was just
Lord Dudley, the man, was merciful.
He spoke strongly in the clerks favor
at the trial and got him light sent
cnce. While the embezzler was in Jail
his wife received a check for his
former salary every week from Lord
Dudley.
AS soon as lie was released the man
went to Whitley court to thank his
benefactor.
Glad to see you, JONES'" said Lord
Dudley, cutting his words of gratitude
short. You're just the man l want.
Open to an offer, aren't you? Would
YOU care to go abroad? l want man
to take charge of some Of my business
affairs in the West Indies. Do YOU
think your wife would mind living in
the tropics?"
"AIy Lord, it is too good of you,"
exclaimed the man. "But how can
you trust me after"
"Pshaw! That's past and paid for"
was the answer. Don't you know the
best cricket bat is the one that's been
broken and spliced?'
And Lord Dudley sent the man out
to the West Indies on Il salary more
than double which he had got from
the town council. and trusted him with
the handling Of large sums of money.
The man proved himself to be worthy
of the confidence
This is only one of many conspira-
cies of kindness Matched between Lord
and Lady Dudley. They are contin-
ually helping lame dogs over stiles.
Their single aim in life seems to be
to make other people happy, and the
amount of thought and ingenuity that
! they spend in doing so is by no means
| small.
Lord Dudley is the patron of no
fewer than thirteen church livings,
and has to support the incumbents of
all of them. This system of patronage
| in the Church of England is bitterly
denounced even by Anglicans them
selves, but if all patrons were like
Lord Dudley there would be no COM
plaint. He chooses his clergymcn most
conscientiously. Mere scholarship or
social influence has no weight with
him; he wants a man who loves his
fellow men. The late Bishop Creigh-
| ton a 41,of
Lord Dudley would have made model
bishop.
Lord Dudley owes much of his sue
cess to his wife. Lady Dudley is Il
beautiful woman, but not half so
beautiful as she is clever, and not half
SO clever as she is kind.
She is the youngest daughter of
Charles Gurney, the great Quaker
banker After his death she was
adopted by the Duke and Duchess of
Bedford. The philarthropic duchess
taught her to love and help the sick,
the destitute and the miserable. She
made her ward a warm-heartcd, ben
evolent woman like herself.
The Duke of Bedford is one of the
largest landlords in London. and owns
a great deal of slum property. His
marriage was one of the romances Of
| the peerage When he was thirty.
Lord Herbrand Russell, as he then
was, served in India as a major in
the army and an aide-de-camp to Lord
The Irish standard., 1903-09-19

Dufferin, the viceroy. The heir to one
of the greatest titles and largest for
tunes in England, lie was naturally Il
mark for dozens of matchmaking
mothers. But he fell in love with Il
clergynan's daughter in Lahore and
married her.
The duchess took the responsibilities
of her rank seriously.
1T is not right" she told her friends,
that we should draw large revenues
from the poor. and never trouble our
selves about how they live ana how
they get the money which they pay
us" SO she set the fashion in looking
after the welfare of the poor in the
east end of London, and many women
of title followed her example.
Before her marriage Miss Quincy
always accompanied the duchess on
these visits to the homes of the poor.
She has a beautiful voice, and is prob
ably the best singer among British
peeresses. Often she would sing for
hours to please sick or aged folks,
while the duchess inquired into their
material needs.
Since her marriage, Lady Dudley
has spent great deal of time and
money helping childrcn's hospitals and
orlfEanagcs. She is a devoted mother
to her own three young children. but
her mother love is great enough to
overflow for the benefit of any child
who is sick. lame, blind or poor. The
greater part of her pin money is spent
buying toys, books and flowers for
children's hospitals.
The Duke and Duchess of Bedford
are Lord and Lady Dudlcys closest
friends. Those who are in position
to know say that they have done much
to encourage and inspire the new and
better Irish policy which bids fair to
place the name of Dudley on the roll of
Britain's great statesman.
The Irish standard., 1903-09-19

I'll" minister called at Il certain
home just after he had come to his
new pastorate. The small boy was
present long before his mother came
downstairs to greet the dominic. Try
ing to be cordial, the minister said
GLOW old are you. my little man?"
Us five at home. six in school and
three on the cars" was the delightful
reply. - H1H5TH
New-York tribune., 1903-06-18
TUGB0AT CRASHES INTO YACHT.
W E. Heating Thrown from Bunk Through
Door Into, Water.

William A. Heating. brother of ex-Commis-
sioner Keating. of the Department of Highways,
had a narrow escape from drowning early yester-
day. when a tugboat rammed his yacht. the Mary
A. Heating. which he sleeping, off East
One hundred and -twenty-frst-st.
The yachts Howard. Frtchie and i<eating
were anchored about twenty-five feet from the
pier lashed together. All belong to the Metro
potan Yacht Club. the members of which gave a
dinner on Tuesday night. MIR. Heating after the
dinner retired Hoard the yacht. He left the door
of the stateroom the deckhouse open.
When the tug. the J. a. Brainerd Of the New
York, NeT-HaNen and Hartford Railroad Com
pany crashed into the yachts middle on the port
side. Mr. Heating thrown out of his bunk,
through the door and into the water. The tug
kept on its way without slowing up, Mr..
Heating says in spite of the fact that he shouted
for help.
Roundsman Klute and Patrolman HelfTich, Of
the Harbor Squad heard Mr.. keatng's shouts.
and put out in boat to him They dragged him
into the boat in seni-conScouS condition, and 1t
took them about half hour to revive him.
Mr.. Heating declared the tugboat had the whole
width of the river to pass through, but that the
captain forced his boat through the twenty-five
feet of space between the yachts and the pier. He
asserted he would sue the railroad company. The
other two yachts were not damaged.
New-York tribune., 1903-06-18
Has GOVT IN END OF NOSE.
SzceIling, Size Of Fist. at First
PuaaIes Bellevue STAFF.

Charles +. ScharT, a janitor at No. 334 East
Fifty-fourtIl-st. walked into the reception room
at Bellevue Hospital yesterday, with sWetllhg
the size Of his fist his nose. Several physl-
clans who looked at him were unable to diagnose
his ailment
DR.. Vose on learning that Scharf had similar
swellings on his elbows, and had been troubled
slightly with gout in his feet, became convinced
that Scharff was suffering from sout which had
settled in his nose. It was the first case o. the
kind that ever came to the attention of the
Bellevue staff and as none Of the doctors had
read of such peculiar manifestation of the dis
ease, nearly every physician and surgeon in the
hospital hastened to the reception room TO nave
look at Scharff's nose. They ali concurred IN
DR.. Noses diagnosis.
The swelings on Scharffs elbows are almost
the size of a hat. although his feet, where the
gout usually settles. only slightly swollen
Scharff explained that his nose had been sWol-
len for some time but did not bother him much
until a few days ago when he struck ii against
the wall while at work.
New-York tribune., 1903-06-18
WITHHOLDS BIG PAYMENT
Grout Acts on Reservoir Contract at
Request of Merchants.

Frederick 2. De Berard, of the Merchants AS
ISOLATION announced last night that at the asso-
Citations request Controller Grout had withheld for
the present the supplemental payment of 100000
&c the contractors building the Jerome Park reser
voir The association, in letter TO the Controller
alleged that the work had been done Illegally.
The association also sent word 10 the Aqueduct
Commission that it would oppose the construction
OF three mile section Of the old aqueduct on the
grounds that the contract given 10 Coleman,
Bueuchaud & Coleman, without authority Of
law The letter TO the commission says that the
contract given without advertising for bids.
This action" says the association 'purported
o be under the authority of existing contract
for the construction of the Croton dam. the
unit prices for which in the most important items
about twice great as the current prices for
such work as is involved in the reconstruction Of
the old aoueduct.
IF this protest be not needed" says the letter
the commission. we should be justified in ask
ing the fnterpostion of court of equity to enlon
the continuance under the contract for dam con-
struction Of the so-called reconstruction Of this
Eection Of the old aque6uct. We however, not
disposed 20 resort TO any measure Of relief which
might tend delay the completion OF this urgently
viii renain after its performance TO prevent the
disbursement of excessive and exorbitent sums for
work which, maintain. never intended to
he embraced within the Croton dam contract but
has been Illegally awarded 10 the contractors
without the fornality OF public letting"
New-York tribune., 1903-06-18
CONSIDERED II HOLDUP.
President PouIson of Iron UOrks
Testifes against Parks.

The examination of Samuel j Parks the walking
delegate accused of extortinG money from en-
pIovers whose men were strike. was continued
yesterday. ExMagistrate Brann his counsel
failed to have the testimony Of witnesses from the
Hecls Iron Works excluded and cross-examined
President NeiIs Poulson. of that company w nat
satisfaction he gained thereby Is SHOWN oy tne
following
ing delegate before Mr. Parks? A.Yes. about
twelve years ago psd ala na for S fSe pg men who
threatened to strike unless their dues We're paid
gate you SI h had payed the $3.50 did You? ANO, it
was no use. he ran away NJ ra-,,. :, ,or.o,7 ,
A.EBecaGse had met Parks once and did not care
Q.|You Thought it very unjust to pay this sum,
didn't you? AI4esa rL.d
Q.-You blamed Parks for this strike didn't you:
Q.CDidn't Parks tell you he would have to tell
do anything in the way of settling the strike? A
o-What did you think that Parks wanted that
money for? A-For his own pocket
OEYou dealt with Parks? Al had 20. -
check Dt@ to Mr. Mr. Mecord that the money was for
0MYoH expected him to use his influence to put
the men back work on the payment OF the
o'NAnd you didn't consider that bribery? A
0.-what did you consider it? Al considered
that was being held up e -. .+rf,s in vour
shop? A@Yes.
Robert H. McCord. an estimator for the iron COM
pany said Parks told him the men would go back
TO work if he PARKS got the money
Mr. McCord said Mr.. Hatfield. the president OF
the American Bridge Company. declared In the
Iatter's office No. 100 Broadway, when the strike
settlement was made. that he (Hatfeld) and Parks
had decided that the strike could be settled for
81 oOO and that they had fixed on that amount
The last witness was John w. Kelly, delegate
of the Housesmiths Union. Mr. Jerome asked him
if it was the duty Of the walking delegates TO
make a weekly statement OF their doings 10 the
secretary of the union. and to present an itenzed
hin of all collections the financial secretary. 1t
was said the witness
Mr. Brann did to cross-exaulfne the
witness but wanted the testimony stricken out
1t was
New-York tribune., 1903-06-18
AMMON FOUND GUILTY.
Makes No Defence SAGE for Plea by
Counsel.

Robert A Arnmon was convicted yesterday Oh
RECEIVING S3o.fo of the Franklin Syndicate
money knowing il TO be such. il taking the jury
a little less than an hour 10 agree on verdict OF
guilty William +. Miller had testified that IN
all Annlon got S24o.0eo os the funds fe-'lzed
from the syndicate swindle, and that Anmon
counselled his flight TO Canado after getting all
the money in sight, and the testimony OF other
witnesses showed that Anrnon had kept nearly
ali he thus obtained
Ammon made no defence further than the ap-
neal of his counsel TO the jury, who declared that
Miller had perjured himself in giving testimony
as the result of bargain with the District Al
torrey. Assistant District Attorney Nou as
serted that ii would not make difference OF a
day in Miller's Imprisonment whether AmInon
was convicted or acquitted.
Justice NeNburger told the jury TO base their
verdict solely on the consideration Of whether
any property was stolen. whether the Defendant
received such property and whether he received
il for felonious purpose
Before he WAS taken 10 the Tombs, Amnoh
was surrounded by a group. including his couh-
sci District Attorney Jerome and Mr. Not-
When some one spoke of his easy way or taxing
the verdict he remarked with grim smle;
We'll I've got as much nerve with me as Miller
New-York tribune., 1903-06-18
FEARS LONG LOCKOUT.
Jerome Thinks Employers Are Die
tafing to Labor Unions.

Chairman John Lundrgan and secretary W. J.
rrannig Of the State Board or Federation and Con-
ciIiation and Agent Stevens Of the State Labor
F,ureau called last evening at No liz Broadway
and had a talk over the trouble in the building
trades will, l.. X Prince. Otto VI. EidHtz and Fred
erick Tutte OF the board Of governors OF the en-
pIoyers' organization. They were fayorably re-
c.fved and talked for hours over the situation.
with the representatives OF the board OF governors
T. x Prince Of the board Of governors. said last
evening that they would welcome an investigation
District Attorney Jerome in discussing the labor
situation yesterday declared it had reached grave
state He said
For number OF years the employers have bse=
paying backrlaiI money to dishonest walking cele-
gates Now t}e opportunity has arrived for the en-
pIoyers TO take the attitude II debating to the
iabo unions to how they shall be formed and the
manner i'm which they shall be conducted. he
Iieve this mpracticdble because " will have
tendency drive the labor unions together and re
sent what appears n personal affrOnt 70 them
have been ob0Oxious. and 7 agree with the employ
ers' association that their powers should be cur
tailed But in order 20 bring about tGr cirtatlTent
diplomacy should be used on both sides II they
try to drive them 20 do IT, they Will take IL 4
threat and the various labor unions viii act a.
the result that there VIII BE- every prospect q long
lockout.
As II appears now. the employers association
be able o win beca the Iaboring men have
now been tor about six weeks and everyday
needs will force them to submit to the demands %
the labor unions viii get their pound az flesh IN
New-York tribune., 1903-06-18
DIR. N4XWELL 4TTACKED.
Committee to Hold Hearing on Ger
man Language Controversy.

After another meeting prolific in argument
fitting CLINE tropic than the ctty's at
present. the executive committee of the Board
of E,duca ton last night decided next Monday
the date which the Committee on Studies
and Text Books will listen to arguments in
favor of having the new course of study recently
adopted for use in the elementary schools 80
changed as to include the teaching Of German
and French in the seventh and eighth years in
stead of only I'm the eighth year. a. provided
for. The hearing will take place in the assem-
bly, roOm i'm the Board of Education Building.
Fifty-ninth-st and Park-ave.. at 2. m.
This was decided after two resolutions. asking
first for a reconsideration of the entire course
and for the reconsideration of the electives as
provided for in the eighth year, were lost The
resolution finally adopted leaves the new
course as it is. and provided only that the COM
mittee who the original sponsors of the
new course. report to the board
Mr. Guy. in fmpassiOned speech. said that
while it might appear farcical to Mr. Harrison.
the subject far from being to the hun
dreds of thousands of Germans in this city. II.
attacked DR.. Maxwell. saying that he himself
had been born and reared in the British Isles.
and had only come to this country late in life:
STILL the board in electing him City Superin-
tendent did not fear British influence.
New-York tribune., 1903-06-18
BUSINESS TROUBLES.

Judgment for S2s121 was entered yesterday
against Patrick Calhoun, Of No. 30 Broad-st- IN
favor of William Wiess, two notes made by
Calhoun on February H. payable thirty days after
date at the American National Bank OF Beau
mont, Tex.
Judgment for 21734 was entered against William
H Spencer in favor of Bernard Uhren stock
broker for money expended and laid out for the
purchase shares of stock of the international
Rubber Company.
Judgment for S34 7O6 has been entered against
Henry A Seymour and Frederick w. johnson
(Seymour, Johnson & Coz, stock brokers, who
failed two years ago, in favor of Anthony N
Brady, on an account stated May 2S 1900
Judgment for s9,515 has been entered against
Winifred Ammon in the suit brought by Alfred
Hayes jr. assignee for the benefit of creditors of
Seymour, johnson & Co. stock brokers.
The Princess of Wales Company, manufacturers
of corsets and dress trimmings, at No. 80 Fifth
ave. assigned to Harvey NJ. Hoyt and Rollin c.
Newton. Inability to maturing obligations is
said to have caused the failure. The assets and
liabilities stated but it is believed that the
assets will equal liabilities. meeting of cred
tors will be held Friday. The company has a
cauital stock of S35 coo.
New-York tribune., 1903-06-18
CHARLES G. EMERY SUED.
a Suit for Damages for Assault Withdrawn
After the Jury Had Found for Nurseryman

watertown. y. Y, June II C5peciaD.-An impor-
tant case affecting Charles G. Emery, New-York
millionaire the owner of Calumet and other
islands in the st. Lawrence River. where he spends
the summer was down for trial in the County
Court to-day, but this morning discontinued.
his attorney says. by the plaintiffs withdrawing
his complaint. Mr. Emery's defense a gen
eTal denial. The plaintiff was George W Shoe
maker who says that he is professional nursery
man. and worked for Mr.. Emery two years. He
alleged in his complaint that he and Mr.. Emery
had some words, and that Emery beat him badly
with his clinched fists; that he wounded
and suffered damages to the extent Of 2e1,
the highest sum that be sued for in
the County Court. The alleged assault the
elimination of affairs between Mr.. Emery and Mr..
Shoemaker and occurred more than year ago.
Yesterday action for services, 10 recover 1000.
in which Mr. Emery defendant and Mr.. Shoe
maker plaintiff, was tried in the County Court.
being out six hours the jury found for the
plaintiff granting him S225. This appeared to be
satisfactory to the plaintiff. Mr.. Emerys defense
was that Mr.. Shoemaker had already been over
paid.
New-York tribune., 1903-06-18
PRESIDENT INDICATED.
Continued from first page.

sendine federal troops to prevent riot ana us
ordar in Arizona At the other extreme Is 'hs
++i+ude of certain capitalists in Wall street.
,,, h.,,e criticised the President for what they
revard as interference with their private DUST
ness afflirs involving immense coiohi' 'i0'7
of capitaI. The President feels that the eTi1ic.''
from, these two extreme sources may oe tesaA"-
cd with cou,pIacency and that he can aonere to
the course which he has laid down TOT nm
self of invoking tre law wherever IL is violated
either bv capitaIistic com mbinations or tnfeus"
riot and disorder He defined his at'tluoe III
this matter in a few sentences OF his speech ue
livered i'm Butte. Mont. on his recent ester
tour: when he said:
Ours is a government of liberty through anu
under the law No man is above II. ana no MAJ.
is below il. The crimes Of cunning OF sIeeu, W
violence are ali equally crimes ana asdr,i? 81, -
them all alike the law must set us tace- I Lio
is not and never shall be government ol I'M
plutocracy or the mob. 1t is, as 1t has oeeH di,'
as il will be a government of the people. lhciHu-
ing alike the people of great wealth. or nneu,
crate wealth, the people who employ others anu
the people who are employee. Whife an peoile
are foolish il they violate or rebel against III
law wicked as well as foolish. yet the most 1901
ish man i'm this republic is the man or "editii
who complains because the law is administered
with impartial Justice against or for hirn- VINO
over the man may be. great or small. OF dt
u-bichaver end of the social scale he may De
whether his offence takes the shape or crime
of greed or cunning whc ther it takes the
shane of pbysicaI violence if it is an offence
against the law it must be stopped, and, II need
no