The Savannah morning news. (Savannah, Ga.) 1900-current, 1903-07-13
UNCLE MINGO'S VIEWS
ON MATRIM0NY.
BY w. T. Williams.

Uncle" said the waiter, Il wants to
ak your advice on a very important
subjec'."
"Wot's de trouble?" asked Uncle
Mingo. lis you got to quit de town?'
20. no; Use tinkin' OBJ gittin mar
ried"
us you indeed" said Uncle Mingo;
"wot you got to git married on, If it's
fair question:"
Il amt got VERY much" admitted
the waiter; "but 1 see cen de paper
some time ago Were somebody say, it
was elder President Roosevelt or else
Mr. Dooly, l forgits wich, dat a man
kin git married on twenty-five dollars,
if he kin git de twenty-five dollars
Well. l has dat much, an a little
mo-"
Zen dat case" said Uncle Mingo
you is rich, so to speak, as it We're
Den / 'spose you done got de gal all
pick out an selec' ?"
IVY no." said the waiter. 81 amt by
no means gone so far as dat yet.
amt eben gone so fur as to git my
min make up wedder l wants to git
married at all or not. Time nough to
PANh O0L 0C sdl dLLCI uOllG COIIl6 u
a 'cision on dat question:"
Amt dere no mahogany colored
damsel tinkin' OBJ witch keeps you wake
O. nights wild dat sick an tired feelin
under your lef han coat pocket?"
You kin sarch me-" said the waiter.
An amt dere none, a hghtin for
witch wild some udder ambitious ribal.
cause you TO come roun' edible now an
den wild your face all smash up?''
Nobody home" said the waiter.
AN amt dere none" continued
separatin' you from your loose change
chen like as de win separateth de chaff
from de w'eat?"
"Nothin' doin'," said the waiter.
Well, den," said Uncle Mingo, eff
so be dat your heart amt bleedin' for
no gal, an likewise your nose amt.
an neider your pocketbook amt, wy
l don't see no call for you to be cen
no hurry. Wot's de use for you to be
nuntin up trouble befo' trouble come
to hunt your"
well, you see," said the waiter. az
is sho' ole 'nough to git married; an
sence l has been studyin' ober de mat
ter, l lowed I'd AK your advice as a
man OBJ experience"
Who, me?" said Uncle Mingo: 81
amt got much experience; L amt been
AiioAAlSu Dul OnCG- lou want to ak
some o. desc fellers wot's been married
half-a-dozen times or mo-
de good book say, which 1 swallers
from kibber to kibber, if a man is MAR
ried, let him submit to de will OBJ de
Lord an stay married; an if he is
single, let him bless de Lord for all
His mercies, an stay single. But peo-
pie is SIGH a perwerse an stiff neck
generation, dat dey all wild one accord
wants to do zac'ly de opposite. Look
at dat winder glass yonder; wot does
you see?"
Il see a whole lot O. flies" said the
waiter.
"Wot is dey doin' ?" said Uncle Mingo;
look good
Some o. DEM" said the walter.
SENS to be on de eenside, tryin' to git
out, an some seems to be on de out
side, tryin' to get Gen."
''Jis So said Uncle Mingo: IAN
OATS de way wild de matrimony bust
ness. Denis wot's outside is tryin' to
git cen. an dem wot's eenside is try
in to git out.
Howsomebber, de good book also saw
1t amt good for man to be alone, witch
means man should ought to git mar
ried wen de proper time come"
IAN wen is de proper timer" asked
the waiter.
de proper time" said Uncle Mingo
is wen you done in' de proper gal
An Wen you done fin he right an
proper gal, you amt goin' to bodder to
AK nobody for no opinion, 'cep' de gal"