Smyrna times., 1903-04-08
SHORT, SHARP AND SNAPPY.

SHORT, SHARP AND SNAPPY.
A President less robust than Mr..
Roosevelt could not stand the pull of
the different reception committees.
A meeting. a courtship and we'd
ding all within three hours is the latest
record of Chicago. But then a divorce
can be obtained in as brief time.
President Castro resignation of the
presidency of Venezuela bears astrong
resemblance to Addicks withdrawal
from the Delaware senatorial situation.
The unfortunate martial affairs of
King George of Saxony must have
proved a severe shock to the Kaiser's
reception to the Divine Right of
Kings.
The most demoralizing influence on
those postofice officials recently found
guilty of maladministrat / appears to
have been contact with members of
Congress.
A reckless Missouri Minister threat
ems to tell the truth in his future
funeral orations. If he carries out his
rash threat he will soon attend his
own funeral.
Mans JOY at the return of Spring is
heeting. II is soon ended by the an
nouncement from his wife that she
"must have new Spring hat, frock,
aud other tixin2s'
The Anthracite coal miners lost by
their strike, wages amounting to S25,-
100000. Under the award of the Com
mission it will take the miners at least
2.3 years TO make good their loss.
The public should not complain that
it has taken too long to discover that
there is a Beef Trust. The proof of
the fact has enriched the treasury of
the state of Missouri by S25, 900.
There is not much satisfaction in
knowing that if the Panama canal
does not prove satisfactory this coun-
try will still have the opportunity to
build the Nicaraguan canal.
Secretary Root has just discovered
that army officers make poor clerks.
The Secretary should let the officers to
lead Germans" ana hire trained
clerks to do clerical work
The Civil Service Commission is
advertising for photographer. From
such gentlemen as We have seen we
should suppose the Com mission could
engage their services for a very modest
compensation.
The practical solution of the problem
of making paper from stalks
opens up an avenue of hope for the
American forests which have been laid
low largely to supply the demand for
print paper.
Governor Odell is to be the chief
attraction of $50. 900 excursion to the
dedicatory exercise of the Saint Louis
Exposition. President Roosevelt, ex-
President Grover Cleveland and few
others will also be there.
The news that the dynamite cruiser
Vesuvius is to be sold for junk re-
minds us of the extraordinary pre-
dictions that she would be able to
blow all the navies of the world into
Kingdom Come with half a dozen
shots.
Persons who are inclined to criti-
else the naval budget of the United
States, which for the next year will
amount to $50, 900, 900, should reflect
that Great Brintain's budget for the
same period amounts to $3.50, 900, 600.
A st. Louis judge has ruled that
hereafter children shall not be permit
ted to hear the testimony in their
parents divorce suits. Certainly this
Judge should receive the general com
mendation for his common sense.
Farmers in the Mississippi Valley
are philisophically trying to secure
some comfort from the we'll known
fact that the food materially enriches
the farms from which it has carried