Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1903-06-06
THOSE INNOCENT GIRLS

Far be 1t from me to come right OUT
and say that all Washington girls are
subtle. not to say foxy. propositions, said
Detroit man who is in Washington for
the first time on visit to some relatives
| that he had never seen before. ''but this
cousin of mine that took out to the ball
game the other afternoon kind O. got me
to guessing whether all of the young wo-
men of the District of Columbia were of a
sort with her in the matter Of craftiness.
"Shes pretty and talented girl but. as
this Is my first visit to my kinsfolk in this
town. /, of course, didn't have much Of a
line on her characteristics. tastes and so
on On Tuesday last said to her in the
morning:
would you like to go to the ball game
| this afternoon?
"She said that she'd like it frst-rate.
" Know the game at ALL? / asked her,
but she suddenly switched the conversation
| then off to something else. and of course
took 1t that she didn't want to confess aer
1 might predict a bored afternoon for my
self in attempting to define the kinks OF
the national game to her
Ever been to ball game befofe? I
asked her that afternoon as we entered the
grounds.
"Ye-es.' she replied, in a sort of hest
tat1ng way but not This year.
There are lot OF changes in the play
ing of the game this year 1 said to her in
an off-hand, patronizing kind of way; but,
them l went on, III explain the new
twists to you when they begin playing
oh. thank you so much, cousin she
replied. and if I'd known much about
her then as know now I'd have been rub
bering for the funny twinkle in her eye
right then.
well, when we took our seats and be-
gan to watch the Philadelphia and Wash
ington players at their warming UP, I
started of on that usual rigmarole that
fellows have to spin in explaining the game
of base ball to their women folks that've
never seen any games before. You know
the kind of stuff-'Now, there are nine men
on side-pitcher, catcher, first, second and
third basemen, shortstop, ETC., ETC., and
each one, of course. has separate piece of
territory to cover, and right on through
the whole spin.
well, sir. she listened to me with wide
eyed interest, and never cracked so much
as symptom Of a smile. Yes?' and
Isn't that singular! and What does the
catcher do then" and Surprising the man
drops the ball?' and all that sort of thing
those were the questions that she put to
me with the most serious countenance in
the world, while l went ahead droolfng to
her the story of how the game of base ball
is played and performed-say, 1t makes me
blush now to remember 1t it!
Il was still explaining the game to her
at the rate of about 200 words a minute
when the megaphone boy announced the
batteries for the two teams. the umpire
yelled 'Batter'S up! and the game was I'M
der way.
'Well, that's about all. I thought there
seemed to be something critical. not to say
expert in the gaze with which she regarded
the lineup of the two teams, but 1t wasn't
until the end Of the inning that fully re-
covered from the shock and was able to re-
gard her with my best article in the way
of a reproachful gaze. So far as l remem-
ho ~ &c oh fho Chn tod
on that first inning, beginning at the mo-
ment that the Philadelphias went to bat:
80 that heap-big Indian, Bender, the
Phillies' pitcher. is their first man at the
stick, Ell? Huh. he couldn't hit air-ship
with a doorscreen! My. but he did snag
out a two-bagger. didn't he-look at that
big no-good Delehanty out there in the
right garden, numbering around like fur
niture van. and too lazy to run after pop
fly ten feet away from his patch! There's
Monte Cross going to the bat for the Ath-
letics, and he's got his batting orb for
certain this year. and it's sure thing that
he'll fetch the Chippewa home-there what
did tell you, three-bagger the first wal
lop at the sphere. and run already! Look
at the way Orth is lobbing those balls
along-he's got no more speed in his de-
livery today than four-year-old hoy
throwing a rock at a birds nest! I Won
der if he thinks those lazy ones are going
to fool that big, good-looking Schreck of the
Philadelphias-there, I just told you that
Schreck knew how to eat up that kind, and
If that isn't good for three sacks 1 don't
know-will you look at little Robinson let
ting that ball roll through his bowlegs-
why doesn't somebody buy him net? Oh,
there's no use in talking. there no ginger,
no team work In the way the Washingtons
are playing this year-now would you just
look at the Phillies gathering in the TALES
three runs already, and only two outs.
Why don't they take Orth out of the box
and did you ever see such sloppy Unfolding?
My, my, Setback. why didn't you get under
that easy little one-you're getting as big as
all outdoors, anyway, and, well, they've
got four runs US in the first inning all
for them l don't know-its a handicap we
can never overcome. especially the way the
Senators are tanning out lately etc. etc
"Oh, no, l didn't say anything to her-I
just handed her. I say. the reproachfu
you ve-sadly-wounded-m gaze But she
only laughed ripptngly when I did that, and
said
Don't get cross cousin-it sounded so
funny to hear you explain the game that /
couldn't resist the temptation to let YOU go
Cn-but, goodness gracious sakes alive I've
been thirty-third degree fan for ever such
a long timer
Far be 1t from me, etc, as I said at the
beginning of this little line of talk to ex-
press the belief that all Washington girls
are as deep as this pretty cousin of mine,
but. all the same. the next time / take q
washington girl to base ball game I'm
gong TO come pretty near finding out be-
fore again make an imbecile of myeslf in
deaVorlng to explain the game to her
whether she's toying me along for the pur-
pose OF having the boot on me when / get
through
MAKING NEW CITIZENS.