Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1903-10-30


Events and Things, there is nothing
can beat volcano. ."-Yonkers States
man.
Jack Lover expecting an outburst OF
grief)-And what would you say If
should take your sister from you? Lit.
tie Helen quietly and politely)-Thank
you. sir.
Madge-Miss Autumn's name was
printed in the paper but her age
wasn't mentioned. Marjorie-Of course
not. That girls age is unit for publ
cation.-Life.
Faith, Mrs. O'Hara, how dye till
thin twins apart?" 'Aw. it's aisy-I
sticks my finger in Dinnis' mouth, an
II he bites | know it's Moike "-Har-
ward Lampoon.
Scribbler you call yourself
a poet or simply a versifier? Scrawler
Well, when the editor lights his pipe
with my stuff it's case OF verse afire.
The Bookman.
Gossip proof: Mrs. Crawford-Hays
they much money? Mrs. Crabshaw-
Why, they're SO rich that, II they pre-
ferred, they could afford 10 stay in
town all summer.-Smart Set
Tommy-Mamma, what made people
in old New York wear those great big
ruffs around their necks? Mamma
That Is how our first families learned
to hold up their heads. my son.-Judge.
Further information: Now" said
the teacher "can you tell me anything
about Hiawatha;' Yes" replied little
Henry; Its the tune that made Long
fellow famous. s."-Chicago Record Her
aid.
The Friend-And so you don't trust
your lawyer? The Farmer-No, sir.
He and the lawyer ON the other side
are too awfully polite. Don't call each
other no names at all"-Kansas City
Independent
Oracular Reinsurance: She-I trust,
Jack, our marriage will not be againt
your fathers Will. Jack--Im sure.
hope not; it would be mighty hard
for US II he should change it.-Town
and Country.
The professional man he needed:
Mike-Are We much hurted, Pat! Do
ye want docthor? Pat-A docthor,
We fule! Afther ben' ruined over be
throlley car? Phat Oi want is II
lawyer.-Judge.
A Lack of Coincidence: Downer-I
am glad 1t Is good form not TO wear
watch with dress suit Upper-Why2
Downer-Because | never have had
my watch and my dress suit at the
same time.-Pick-Me-U Up.
Photographer-Dont assume such
q fierce expression. Look pleasant.
Murphy-Not on your life. My wife is
going TO send one Of these pictures TO
her mother, and II l look pleasant
she'll come down on visit. ."-Phila-
delphia Record.
rs this Mr.. Lancaster Yes"
IF you have half minute TO spare
I'd like to show YOU" You
needn't III subscribe for IT, all right.
You're the first book agent that ever
came here that didn't call me Lank'-
st'r. Chicago Tribune.
"Of course" said the boasting colo
mel, there are some who might doubt
my yalor at Gettysburg because | did
not lost an arm or leg" "Oh, don't
let that worry you" spoke up little
Richard 81 heard papa say you lost
your head. d."-Philadelphia Record.
Civic Jealousy: yisitor-You haven't
got half as nice cemetery here as We
have In Elmville. Prominent citizen
Cof Hawyllel-No, I've always heard
that the cemetery is the only part OF
your town that holds out any induce
ments for permanent residents.-ehi-
cago Tribune
lust throw me half dozen of your
biggest trout" said the man with the
costly anglers outfit. Throw them
exclaimed the astonished nsh dealer
THAT'S what | said" replied the party
of the first part; then I'll go home aud
tell my wife caught them. | may be
a moor fisherman, out I'm no liar -
Chicago Daily News.
How savagely that COW looks at
me said the typewriter boarder from
the city. Il reckon AS heow Ii be on
aceonnt NV that air red waist yewNe
oot on. miss" answered the Old farm
or Dear me-" exclaimed the key,
towing maid; "of course 1t isn't quite
nm 70 date. but I'd no idea country
COW would notice it.'-Chieago Daily
News.
A dlial child: A certain nohleman'
roll known 10 society, while ohe day
strolling round his stables. e1me across
his eoaehman's little boy on a seat
nlsv,ng with his toys. After talking
to the youngster short time he sal1'
well. my little man, do you know
who | am?" "Oh, yes" replied lhe
vonngster you're the man that 'ides
IN NV fathers carriase"-Iit-biIs