The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1903-11-18
The OutWitting Of Grandma


front names with them. Nor did it
strike them upon meeting their daugh-
ter for the first time that she could pos
sibly have forgotten anything. She GER
tainly had the unexpresSed air of one
who has nothing to forget.
What a love of Chin" sighed
mamma.
Pretty sunburned. amt she?" com
mented pape.
Mamma paid no attention She was
used to him. II shan't dare to tell any
body she's mine" was what she an
swered. It'll sound so much like
Boosting"
You'll not need to- declared papa.
THAT nose will do as well for identifi-
cation as a name would on her collar"
Mamma lifted up her voice In dismay:
why, Jim, she hasn't got namei
Papa whistled. How are we going to
fill out that certificate of authorship for
the health Department." he demanded.
She'll have to have name,'' decided
mamma. "She can't be married, or
even christened, without one.'
ooh, we'll, she looks all right for fam
lily use as she is" said papa.
That name. The quest of it put the
Pipers to it harder than that of the
holy grail ever did Sir Launcelot OF
all the 292 names of women which were
catalogued with their derivatives at the
end of Webster's, there was not one
her own name, Mary, from modesty, no
doubt, but she vetoed consistently any
others that papa suggested, and asked
him carelessly afterwards, when he
seemed to be off his guard, who were
Maud, and Lillian, and Marianne, any
way, and why had he never told his lit
tie wife about them?
He, poor man, was turning names over
and over as he walked the floor nights
with the unnamed baby. He puzzled
over the puzzle as he hung on the strap
going to town on the trolley car morn
ings from the suburb to which he had
', tod in
movements of the tram would settle
themselves into one of the two rhythms
which nowadays his lips were always
forming, Martha, Marion, Marianne,
Maria" or else 'Mathilda, Maud, May,
Mehitabie," for devotion to his wife
made him begin always with her name,
Mary, whether he was running along
the Webster list toward A or z.
AS for mamma, after she had once
dressed the baby all by herself, had
brushed the soft hair in different di-
rection from that in which it was meant
to grow, and had counted the tiny pink
toes over and over again. to be sure
that they were just the right number,
she did not care whether the darling
was ever christened or married.
Matters might have gone on in this
way Indefinitely if the grandmothers
had not come simultaneously to make a
visit Their coming brought affairs to
a deadlock. Grandma Piper said she
thought that it was only proper that the
first baby be named after its fathers
family. Grandma Grahame was polite,
/ but firm. 1t certainly was q mother 8
privilege to choose the name, and they
must leave it all to Mary Her advocacy
| of the claims of the Grahams was no
| less urgent because she put it delicately.
Forenoons the two ladies discussed the
question with tolerantly smiling faces;
at monday with naughty eyes; with
/ stiff upper lips at nightfall; and the
next morning they would begin all over
! again, while papa looked stricken as he
ran for his car, and mamma Rugged
/ the baby as If she could not be altogeth-
! er sorry for anything which brought her
such a precious opportunity.
/ One Sunday morning Mary stopped
her husband as he tried to slip out of
the room early without disturbing her.
''Oh, jim dear, don't go driving unless
you take baby and me with you. Per
haps if there's nobody by to see,
/ they Il"
Just what they might do she didn't
say, but she looked as il she meant it.
Perhaps they win.' grinned papa,
hopefully.
ma. Let's go and have the baby chris
tened"
In the cool gray of the early morning
they crept out of the house to the barn
carrying the nameless baby, and a pick
led up breakfast which mamma had hur-
riedly tied in paper bag. Papa hitch
ed up old chestnut Dollie, lifted mamma
+, and the baby and the paper bag into the
single buggy, slid the barn door open
4 as quietly as possible, jumped into his
place. whipped up, and ratified along the
| driveway, trying to make a noise like a
rnilkman's wagon.
But what are we going to have he1
christened?" queried mamma.
They looked at each other in mutual
INDIGESTION.
Name it after your family. Mary
love-" suggested papa, thinking OF
Grandma Grahame.
Name it after your own" retorted
Mary, hotly, thinking of Grandma Phi
per-
by CAD" groaned Jim, "even moth
ers-in-law are catching"
Goodness, I hope not" shuddereo
Mary CHANGING over hire shoulder and
squeezing the baby till she protested.
You could no longer hear the horses
hoofbeats on the road.
II have it." shouted papa Lets cal
the baby for the state that she was borr
: sInnocence?'' Mamma looked tenderl1
papa laughed and let Dollie go her owl
gait, while he stopped his ears a minute
mo, no: something more emblematic.
He chucked his daughter under her pur
pie chin. Hello, there, Illinois?' he said
|. his aiiusion. She was quite taken with BIZ
idea. It seemed to her so patriotic, an'
neither Piper nor Grahame had ever beer
, The minister, whom they walked, feareS
'twould be irregular TO undertake
. christening in his own parlor befor
breakfast when he was still in dressin.
gown and slippers
} s.All ri~ht Wen sit down and wait
with US. You're the only minister. w
know. and we're not going home till W
get this baby christened.'
Before that baby knew it she was N
longer Just baby: she had become Hi
nois and she was staring curiously abou
/. I 70 nj that 0rQn of cold
wet water on her nose
OF course as they drove home, Mar.
r wished. woman like, that they had no
| done it. She told Jim so. but he onl
chuekled, a way he had when he though
| of some things
The grandmother left that same after
noon having become friends for life. JiI
kissed his fingers tenderly after their re
treating figures Gone" he said Con