New-York tribune., 1903-07-25
VERSES VEGETARIAN.
RY a Disillusioned RacheIorO

Whe9 ae9 bS9 Was ny eyery Sr one pgTsd bps
had very escape indeed
OF getting married.
Ny income was dminutive it's true.
Yet that was but a small consideration
Her fascination.
The day arrived when I resolved to try
For Y to heT faheT h0s evening" mn
Was asked to dinner.
Although 1 took some other female down,
To watch my fair adored one smile or frown
Across the table
Now half way. through the dinner had got.
When suddenly CHANGED to notice what
My love was eating.
Asparagus. that coy, elusive thing.
She swallowed with an energy most frantic
(Although it may be very nourishing.
It's not romantic).
The nodding heads, when lifted from her plate
TT, Toward her & ruby lips she started thrusting
To call disgusting.
I felt that I must gaze at her, perforce:
The melted butter ran it's Wayward course
Along her fingers.
But the pile of heads before her dwindied
Within my heart there hickered out the fame
That love had kin6led.
The mad delicious moments of the past
For once and all were ABSOLUTELY ended.
1 left the house much sooner, the last
Than 1 intended.
4OuIg men. II any naldenS you adore,
Be guided by a sensible suggestion,
And watch them eat asparagus before
You put the question:!
Punch
A young Member of Parliament according 10 an
English paper has had an experience of the retort
discourteous, which, being a man with sense of
humor. he does not hesitate repeat against him
self He was addressing a meeting at which there
was a considerable rowdy element present Like
the other speakers. he was frequently interrupted
until, losing patience, he called for silence saving
Don't let every ass bray at once" You go on.
sir said the rngleader. and the honorable member
was left without reply.
Wife-Before we were. married you pretended that
you liked TO have me sit your knee
Husband-Wen you We're pretty good preten5er
yourself You pretended that you preferred 10 sit
on chair.-(Chicago News.
An Augusta. Me- collector of antique furniture
has just discovered an old Washington clock in a
New-Hampshre town which he prizes highly E5
found it in deserted house which was buft earl,,
in the last century and 1t was slowed away in the
garret He succeeded in buying It, and it will ar
rive in Augusta in few days. More than a cen
tury has elapsed since il first began to tick Tho
designs drawn in England and il was man
factured in the mother country II is nine feet A.,
height, and the material is mahogany. II sets or
lions feet. The works are brass. On the dial ara
oil paintings OF George Washington the far
cherry tree which he cut the chapel where he at
tended divine worship and the Potomac River tn
case is maid in brass wishbone work At the ton
is brass ball. with a rosette on each side and a
Queen Anne head. 1t is an eight day clock Tbe
new owner thinks there Is not another such a rara
old tmepieee IN New England. There is a great
demand for old furniture in the cities so tbat oo1
lectors are exploring the whole State for II Tbera
is hardly a town which has not been careflIII,-
ransacked.
Miss Giddy !vivaciouslyl-My new gown is =
dream-very light gray voile s'"" N Il
He (practicaly)--Ah YES. very nrett,- r.. -
But doesn't gray soil easily? '' IA sure.
Miss q, 0eaUtng befO she
made with broad black girdie~(chicsgo aecoi sI -
IETslld- ANcSpFU-