Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1903-01-31

Calderhead quavy
Bowersock navy
Stinktum Stanktusn Long:
In-goes-he.
Frank Nelson for congress
-
The political pie counter seems to
be mounted on the Seventh district
band wagon. Climb in or go hungry.
~
III that Trego county High School
bill should become a law. look out for
those fellows whose "taxes will be in
creased ten dollars on the quarter sec
ton" They won't do a thing TO Doc
Jones the next time. Let us have
the school.
Wooed, won and wed in twelve
hours is the record of a Chicago
couple. Pretty swift isn't it? Wei
people have To hurry to keep up with
the divorce courts.
80
They say that the author, Boot
Harrington, smokes cigarettes. 1t i
futher alleged that they are of thu
Turkish variety and smells like burn
ing carpet rags.
A German mas Invented machine
which actually measures "that tireo
feeling" which we all have at times
BY its use we will know just when t.
stop working and avoid danger. How
fortunate We have often felt til.
need of some such instrument.
Chicago is putting in an autOmath
telephone system which will dispense
with the services of the "hello' PEG
Pile a further advantage is that
central can eat onions without
oifense.
OF course the kid was entirely limo
cent of any intention to lnSinuate CT
reflect upon the character of the dis
course, as lie is not yet three years old,
but it was little bit funny. Just a.
the minister arose to begin his ser
mon the little fellow said, loud enough
to be heard, by all near him, Now
I'm ready to go hone-''
*x*
Kisser Hobsun will not be placed OF
flee If lie wants to go to congress he
can resign his position in the navy.
Otherwise he must go on with the
work for which Uncle Sam educated
him. Too bad isn't it.
***
The pessimist thinks that this is
the worse old world he has ever lived
in. The optimist thinks it the oeSt
he has ever known That's the diff
ference-take your choice. 1t is just
as easy to be one as the other and a
would say.
OF course the Kansas Senate Solons
should be careful of their health-ex-
ira careful. If the Superintendent of
Ventilation should leave the windows
open too long there ought to be an
Assistant Superintendent of Ventila-
tion to go around and close 'em again.
Now let the Senate appoint a few
Chamberlains of the Bath and all will
be well. That's proper. Wesley.
-
Admitting that we havn't wireless
NSACSAaph otttuiois bhoSC IOWil Ullit
boast of their girlless telephone sys-
tenn nave no edge on Wa-Keeney
That Shocks is a funny fellow viii en-
he feels that way Some years ago, be-
fore he had graduated into the degree
Of NJ D.. Shocks was in town one Sat
nrday when IA violent thunder storm
came up 1t was getting late in the
evening and a number OF us had gath
cred in Nerbeck's store, waiting for
the storm to suhside before starting
home Just when the rain was pour
ing down the hardest tile futa.e VEN
der of patent medicines entered BY
tue rear door aud some of the hays
Immediately guessed that he had
been down the alley to the south
somewhere He was dripping wet but
jolly as ever and opened a conversa-
ton with the crowd in this wise:
Shay fellers. fhicl IT'S rainin' out
there.
Going home tonight, Smokes
You besh yer bootch l am. (Hic).