davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1903-01-02

~FM from 4 tterss" Mats Him IN
>ssssafn0 = Ne Pair OK.
4 y~sAg 1aa, has II - III leG.
11lQe4 lowa Chestnut sAceet - -.
q 6aV beGtae . s1nG11arR 1eo101e1l
0kl.
~'keDs, isn't hsr" 4 broker aakpl
raeher ssaAs34tseus1V, 81 ~ es4-
peafsa rssalsl:
Yea, lane hoa q III kom q
Aerso." The others tsas q esate4Dt
1t sass washed, and Win =: Rv1v
interest II his vGtoe 10 eea>1a0o1:
''How Id it happen? Psle?"
The second man answered: 1T
&Aa't happen. It is 4 fake. The
truth IL that he feAsw went lane
through wearing shoes that were to
tight for hiR. HIS doctor told ne -.
But he tells every enc that he was
thrown and that his horse rolled 81
Nm, and that, somehow, makes Ais
lanenoss romantic He used to wa1k
straAght," said the second man, 40.
oerdiRg to the Philadelphia Record,
and now he umps, but the deformtty.
on account of the lie he tells about
it, throws glamor over him, and he
Is mere popular with women than he
ever was before. Lamed BY being
thrown from a h0rse-there il moth
ing better, except q sword cut from
4 duel, to win girls hearts WITH"
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1903-01-02
81 !! T. III Il.


" MI Ida 4 eCanlev - retur.....a iro,.,.,
EElroswossd. Mich. sst=5 A.
Miss Alma Tom is visiting ia Akslsy.
Isl NJ. md Mr.. Aug. Brisseof Westport
are Visiting relatives near the city: r: ~;
/: q. g. Is and: family are. visiting at
Hudrop, Nj. f., -. . ,:.:.34,.<
!. B. Barton returaed from Bsmidji. last
Monday
Emil Erickson, tho Aitkin photograph
or, was down for q visit. 49,: = !.
Mrs. Harry Ha.nm and children are
visiting relatives i, st. Paul.
Grey Eagle e or. Long Prairie Demo-
crat: Mrs.. Clark Barry went to Little
Falls lastsveek to care for her sister.
Mrs. Arthur Carter and the new nephew
Who hae Just arrived.
=. Miss Addie Tanner is visiting at
Morris.
:. D. Lapping was iu from Morrill,
Wednesday.
Mrs. Geo. Morrell of Minneapolis Wis
tied her parents, Mr. and Mrs. Jas. Tan
ner- T.
Hal. Conner was down from the piner-
iea for a VISIT.
Frank Arendt OF Mazeppa is visiting
his father. Philip Arendt.
Mr.. and Mrs. A. Raymond Sr. are
back from Walker.
Mrs. w. E. Young of Mankato is Wis.
iting with Mrs. 0. c. Trace.
Arthur Marotte of Crookston is vieit-
ing relatives here.
l. L. Warren is travelling in the south.
Mrs. ". Gibson went to Oshkos Wis.
Friday.
Mrs. Geo. Keough of Brainerd is visit
ing relatives here.
L. Duplex and Miss Della Chevrette
have returned to Duluth after visit
With Mr.. and Mr.. J. l., Rocheleau.
Mss Lucy Quinn has returned from
Fargo.
Bridge Engineer Cappellsn was up
from Minneapolis Monday.
Mrs. J. K. Martin 10 vls,ting Mr.. Mar
tin at Aitkin.
Mr.. and Mrs. F. Joesting are visiting
in st. Paul.
Supts. Seal and Frasisr attended The
meeting Of the state educational aeso-
s,atieI 1T st. Pasl.
Mrs. E. r. Shaw returned frea Da-
lath Tuesday. Her sister, Mss Victoria
Smith, will visit there for some tine.
Auditor Butler and County Attorney
Li.dbsreh attended the meeting Of
eeusty sficials at 1t. Paul Tuesday.
Miss Luslla Thomas visited at Nashus.
In. ~:
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1903-01-02
Danauet Tor unhappy Husbands

Banquet Tor Unhappy Husbands.
Very shrswd il their business trans
aoG1eas are the people Of Turin, aad.
~ tie following incident shows, tho
sense of humor is also strongly devel-
Oped in them.
In the local journals recently ap-
peared an announcement that a large
banquet would soon be given, at which
the only guests would be those hus.
bands in Turin who did not live hap
DilY nth their wives.
The banquet, in a word, is to be a
sert Of consola&fon feast and the ut
most care viii be taken that. while it
Is in progress, the unfortunate spoases
shall not be interrupted by their
wives.-Stray Stories.
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1903-01-02
Motley.

Dee. 2S-Tke funsral Of Mr.. and, Mrs.
H. LawAsad's infant son was held last
Sa day from the Free Methodist church.
Mrs.. c. n. williams visited hsr daugA-
ter, Mrs. X. WsrtAing, at Fiseawssd.
MISS EGs Biaksslss il hons for: the
holidays. ..-::'>
Join Oliver was home iron Cavalier
for 4 Christnaa visit.
Mr.. Gill'ss 10 quite i'll ut Cass uak 4
with typhoia fever:
Carl Rosehsla, Frank aal Miss Hsl.
dah Abrahan@ea. frsn st. Paul, arr
here for the holidays, alss Gus A brahan
So. from St. Cloud.
The Christmas entertainment at the
NJ E. church was very ins.
=. Mr.. and Ms. G. Q. San psol Of Locke
n. b., are visiting Ars. S. parents, Mr..
aaa Mrs. 8. Frs acisee.
The Woedmea will install officers Jan.
Sd.
Earl and Leon Thomssen were lucky
little boys Christmas. Eaca got ~
Shetland pony from their father
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1903-01-02
Pointed Out Artists Error.

Pointed Out Artists Error.
A French journal relates an aaec-
Aete regarding the late James Tis-
sot, by way Of illustrating his minute
and exact realism. A visitor asked
him one day whether the picture he
was at work on was intended to IL.
lustrate the time of Christ The artist
replied in the Affirmative. Then"
said the visitor, permit me to call
your attention to an error. Aloes,
such as you have in your picture, did
not exist in the Mediterranean regions
till after the conquest Of Mexico by
SPAIN" .Tissot promptly took bis
brush and altered the picture.
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1903-01-02
n i / Il l;
' I||l :!

-. 3IABo 4 40 III. q. \.
Johssop, d.. 2oth, = -. Il . Il 555'8#
Swanson Bros. ~ lsisg good bs.i
ness. Aud : square b1aiaass. toe. a&5.
CAas. Rychnsr Of Platss vas hsre Oh
business last wssk. #:$ s v HI: 7s ;ss
Abraham Olson Ass besxhs ths En-
lund place, and Nj. Balaal has moved
to Little Falls. -. :
A dne Chriatnas tree aad entertain
ment waa given at The Evangelical
church Friday nigit.
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1903-01-02
The new lire map OF tie city, made
by sh.sanbern Co. of Chicago, has
been received by the local insurance
men.
the ST. PAUL CALENDAR
F0R 1903.

six shssts fex15 isshss, Of beautiful re-
productions in solors Of pastsl 1ra~isee
By Bryses, 10 now ready for dat ibsties
and will b mailed 81 rsseipt Of twenty
I've (2S) seatseo,a orsta0ps. Address
r. 4. Miller, General Passenger Agent
Chisago.
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1903-01-02
The Bon Ami club gays 4 dane.
Wednesday evening.
Alert N(iaaeseta.

The fret betsl il 1t. Paul was 4 Log
tavern erected in 1915, whore Tho ner
ehauts hotsl new stands. TIE frat
"Luited" train between lianeapolis
st. Paul and Chi a8s was the isnsss
Nsrth-Wester, Limited, a.a it still
stands % the acme OF the car-builders
art,
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1903-01-02
- - .
Norven, Mich, May l.

NOFfeIl, Mlcu., May l.
Dear Genevieve-John has come. He"
does care, and mother said she guessed
1t all along. He did not dare tell noe
when I was ill for fear did not care
and would feel sorry for him. Isn't he
thoughtful? We are to have the quiet
ct little wedding in the early fall, and
then shall see you for little while
before we go to Georgia for the winter,
for :am not to give up the pines Alto
gsther. "-.,:'~:
This il the haef,iest Mayday, l have
ever known. I cannot write more now
Al John 10 waiting for me to 60 WIKI
hG. We viii t1V to find 4 few hsk
sprays Of arb1tas. Lovingly yev1 fx34nh1
MARsdxN: -
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1903-01-02
NORTHEAST DARING.

Dec. 29-Mies Caroline Pearson came
home 'a from Christmas. z..>@, :. l., -.
I Miss Annie johnson visited Riverside
this week. =: ~, r'.' I" >:;
Chas. johnson practiced singing. He
is quite visitor at Green Prairie.
Land hunters still around. There's
plenty to sell in sections 10 and II
We don't think it pays farmers to buy
cream separators. 1t don't pay for the
trouble, unless you have great many
cows.
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1903-01-02
fdrth'S Nearest NeiQhbor.

The minor planet named Eros was
first observed by Witt oi the Urania
Observatory, in Berlin. After having
disappeared from view for more than a
year, the planet was recently reds
covered ~ Prof. Ling OF Chamberlain
Observatory, Colorado. 1t has the dis
tinctton OF being the earth's nearest
ne'gbbor 10 the solar system. Years
ago golden grain belt beer was die
covered, and has has since had the dis
tinction Of being most nourishing and
delicious drink. If you don't know the
merits at this beer, get a case and learn
to know it's value. Order of your dealer
or BE- supplied by Joseph N. Ledoux
LiItls Falls.
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1903-01-02
Tax levy.

The county auditor has computed
the fetal tax lsvy for the county,
witch il So mills. 40 tollews:
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1903-01-02

tho tow d. me =.
we1e pasafngs Nike gnomes into the hil q.
sd every thing seemed 90 uncannYh6G
4 was genuinely startled when
enc suddenly took my basket from -:
5s It was t~:ly a sciloolmate of. Grosye:
NJ T.. who had joined me unobserxet-,
He Is descendant of the old voyageurE
who first ventsfed into this region. am
their wild love of nature breaks out IN
him occasionally, with most disastrous
effect upon his education. He seems H.
know that 1. too. love the natural Mprlh
and has sense of comradeship.. When !:
Ne took my basket, he already had ~;
armful of most perfect blossoms. He
had heard wanted some. - :: i.
Well, dear, this letter has lasted far
into the night. Ny eyes are heavy, and
I lay down my pen with the wfsh:tfsat
your dreams may be as sweet as the
fragrance Of my room: Faithfufly
yours, MARIAN: ~.
-. a. .:.<
Norven, Mich, April 80
Well, Bill, here goes the lasts:box-
We've cleaned up pretty good out m Is
all, haven't we? What are you going:
to do with your money? Guess III put
mine toward gun. 1 want to- 60 ~
with the chap told you of aWfully:
Ma says Il camera would be nice. Their
I could take views of this part of the,
country to take home with me. Say.
did you know we are going home next
fall? Marian's lot better. Gee, btt
you did stick Doc Graham. Asked yo 'Fs
all about Sis, did he?. Well, he needn't
have, for Sis don't like him anyway
When he came last night, she cried
Amt girls soft? l wouldn't cry if 8
fellow came to see me that didn't like
Ma likes him, though. She kissed him
once. He's real nice to me- SOL slut
kicking, but it don't seem fair to bother
Sis when she amt real strong yet. The
fellow l said is whistling for me to GO
fishing with him, so here goes.
.GRUBS-
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1903-01-02

Joe O'Conner has been reinstated
as engineer on the N. p,
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1903-01-02

To Cure II Cold In ONO Day
Take Laxative Bromo Quinine Tablets.
All druggists refund the money if it fails
to cure. E. W. Groves signature in en-
each bOx,25c.
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1903-01-02

Norven, Mich, April q.
Dear Genevieye-I enjoyed your lit
tie note very much, though it was
quite too short. 1t was like brief call
from home friends. How I wish !
could really have a glimpse Of yom
dear self ard give you a peep at om
paradise!
Yesterday afternoon I spent gather
ing arbutus for Grosvenor. I wan
dered lover the hills and far away
My path lay along track where the
red ore glistened like blood from the
wounded heart of the range. The
great pines had been cut away to let
the miners steal the iron framework Of
the hill. A bluejay fitted before nae
scolding all the way from his nest Is
the tamarack swamp. =
Perhaps fell a-dreaming as gath
cred my fragrant burden, fora rad:
deep purple had settled over the valley
before turned homeward. A soft dark
ness had settled over everything be
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
The Blind Lover.

The Blind Lover.
They tell me that her eyes are blue,
Her cheeks display a wild rose hue
What need is there to tell!
The graces of her smiling glance.
The peeping dimples that entrance,
feel their beauty's spell;
When first 1 heard her singing.
How swift the shadows flew!
While yet the strain was winging
l felt her heart was true.
1 cannot view her locks of gold.
Her little ears enticing mold,
Whereon gem is hung;
But when her fingers nest in mine.
What they reveal none can divine
No poet ever sung!
To me a sense is granted
Unknown to other men,
And by its light enchanted
1 see beyond their ken.
Samuel Minturn Peck in Boston Tran
script.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
Besieaed by Snails.

A dealer in edible snails at Paris,
France, recently received a consign-
ment of twenty-five large barrels from
the vineyard districts. Before retir-
ing to bed he opened each barrel to
make sure that the snails were alive
and fresh.
Instead of fastening the barrels
down again, he merely spread tar
paulin covers over them, the result be-
ing that in the night the snails es-
capped. The man, who slept in a little
room off his shop, was awakened in
the dark by some of the snails crawl
ing over his face.
For the moment he was too terri
fed to move. Then he sprang from
bed in search of light, but he trod
on some of the snails, which were all
over the place, and fell heavily to the
ground, inflicting a serious wound on
his head.
Screaming out that he was being
murdered, he fed into the street.
where gendarme subsequently found
him fainting from loss of blood.
Through the open door was moving
an innume-able procession of snails.
The shop and bedroom were found to
be covered with them, and hours were
occupied in returning them to their
barrels.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
Bill Fish of Bear Lake.

Bear lake, an isolated and deep
sheet of water among the highest hills
of Chautauqua county. N. Y, has in
its depth curious fish known locally
as the bill fish.
1t is gar, and is a connecting link.
so naturalists say, between fish as they
are to-day and as they were in prehis-
toric times The bill fish is found in
this state only in this Chautauqua
county water.
sharp long bill, full of formidable
looking teeth. The bill fish grows to
weigh 20 pounds and looks ferocious,
New York Sun.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
WIT AND WISDOM.

Society is a matter of digestion.
To seek an iar.,aticn is to invite an
suit
The homely woman can afford to be
10 good"
Never look stupid or the world will
link you so.
A man hates a clever woman, but a
oman adores a clever man.
People who try to appear wise are
ten only plain, every day fools.
A wise woman defies Time the
lille she wooes him with a smile.
Avoid people who take more interest
/ your affairs than you do yourself.
If you have a heart never let the
orld know it. 1t is such awfully bad
jrm.
When a man boasts of his morality
is time to make his funeral arrange
tents.
Illusions are the wells that destiny
lrows over our eyes to blind us or to
lchant us.
Its pity that the woman didn't
AIRY the other fellow. $50 her hus-
and thinks). @
A beautiful woman enhances her
1arm if she can surround herself
ith an air of mystery.
1t is better to enjoy laugh at your
wn expense than at the expense of
liners vino may not be able TO stand
If the wife is the better half and
he husband is the better half, then
here on earth does the mother-in-
~ come in?
Start a man and woman together on
he road to perdition and the woman
ill get there before the man has
leverly passed the first quarter
Thyson Mari in Mil
-aukee Sentinel.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
They Went Together.

An example of the ready repartee of
Secretary Leslie NJ. Shaw of the treas
ury department was related at the
Fifth Avenue hotel the other day.
The secretary, attending a church
service in Washington, Joined heartily
in the hymns, and after the service
one of the members of the congrega-
ton said:
Mr.. Secretary. l am glad to see you
do your part in the singing"
Yes" drawled the secretary, they
say money talks; so l am sure the
secretary of the treasury ought to
sing."-New York Mail and Express.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
DYseEPTIc THOUGHTS.

Be it baled, boxed or bottled, it is in
emand, and properly.
But the health food-gibes cannot
rither, nor jesting stale, its infinite
ariety.
None of it is as queer as the name
bears, and nearly all of it is better
nan it looks.
Now that we do not have to digest
ur food speed the day when we will
OF have to work for it.
And in time it will mean a new
hair in the colleges-that of the ap-
lied science of health foods.
Bad cooking gives us dyspepsia
nd good cooking leads to the gout.
'ut one may talk just as much about
dyspepsia as he may of the gout, if he
as it.
1t is solving the servant question,
,r when Honora strikes, all that need
g done is send to the grocery for an
ssortment of cans and boxes and the
torn is weathered.
The health food and the automobile
ave taken prestige over the coal
trike and the ice man as subjects of
okes. 1t is not within the reach of
Il to ride in an automobile, but in
his land of the free there is none SO
oor that he may not be struck by
ne.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
Not Such a Fool.

A young man who had returned
home from South Africa, where he had
been for his health, narrated his ad-
ventures to his father, and told him
among other things he had bought u
silver mine for G1,000.
Il knew they'd swindle you!" ex-
claimed the old man. 80 you were
fool enough to buy humbug miner"
"Yes; but didn't lose anything. 1
formed a company and sold half the
stock to Londoner for G1,500."
"Y-you did," gaxped the old man,
turning white. I'll bet I'm the one
who bought it,
Exactly So" coolly observed the
young man, as he crossed his legs and
asked his father whose turn it was
now.-London Tit-Bits.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
NEW PHILOSOPHY.

The Chicken Bristle" philosopher
the Elmo Register has lately come
} the following conclusions:
''The man who feels like king at
light generally feels like the devil in
lie morning.
1--WE get our wisdom Gf we have
n.y. by experience. No man ever
axes up his second baby to see it
ugh.
It is easy to get your neighbors to
peak well of you. All you have to do
just to lay down and die.
There are some Irish who are so
atriotic that they won't drink whisky
Iade by an English distillery, but
iere amt manv of them.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
Novel Road-Makinu.

A new road for transport by auto
mobile is being constructed in the
Congo Free State. and at present it
extends $50 kilometres. The method
pursued is simple enough. All that
is done is to drive a herd of forty
elephants three or four times over the
track marked out by surveyors. They
level down distractions as efficiently
as steam roller.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
Tho Brooklvnlte

Ex-Lieut. Gov. Woodruff, at the
Lincoln club, Brooklyn, was asked by
a quizzing fellow-member If he knew
the reason why the inhabitants of
their borough were called Brooklyn
ties. ITO be sure | do" promptly re-
piled the genial Tim" with his most
expansive smile. Notwithstanding
election daylight is the only time
they are ever there!"-New York
Times.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
Oriuin of Monroe Doctorinn.

Monroe had just paid his physician
$500 for curing a cold Thereupon he
laid in a supply of quinine, blankets
and whisky, thus founding the great
system of Monroe doctoring which has
made America so healthy that the
other powers tremble.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
Should Women Work?

Prof. thinner of Berlin, has been In
vestigating the cause of insanity
among women, and has come to the
conclusion that if women are ad-
mitted into competition with men
the inevitable result will be a tre-
mendous increase of insanity among
the women. He finds that the percent
age of women teachers who become
insane is almost double that of the
men teachers.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
Fortunate.

TITS Fortunate said the man who is
always looking for the weakness of
human nature, that calendars are
given away so generously every year" )"
Il don't see why it is particularly
lucky"
IF they had to be purchased, some
people are so close fisted that they
would try to do business a whole life
time with the same almanac"
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
Hyphens Paid Better.

81 understand young Briefless is
about to marry the daughter of old
Bonds, the millionaire"
Yes, so l am told"
'Will he give up the law business ?"
yes; he will give up the law bust
ness and go into the son-in-law bust
ness"
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
Fighting Grasshopper Pest.

Tubes of gelatine containing germs
of a disease warranted to kill locusts
and grasshoppers are to be distrib-
uted to. American farmers. Several
insects will be inoculated add then
released in order to spread the dis
ease.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
No Fault of His.

IF this woman was violent and
headstrong during the engagement, as
you say" queried the Judge of the di.
vorce court, why aid you marry her?"
Il didn't, your honor" replied the
plaintiff "She married me-"
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03

enclosed drawing of the carriage,
which was published by the editor.
Both reading matter and illustration
were reproduced in the (American)
Mechanics Magazine several weeks
later. A young New Yorker. whose
interest was aroused by some COM
ments of the American editor in re-
gard to the possible effect which such
an invention might have on the move
ment in favor of better roads in Amer
lea, kept the copy of the paper in
which this pioneer automobile was de-
scribed. The Illustration is the one
originally published in America at
that time.-Philadelph Ledger.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
Power of Birds.

What tremendous power an eagle
eXerts when carrying away lamb
that weighs, say, sixty pounds or over!
If you take the weight of the bird al
together, rs pounds, then it appears
that an eagle can develop more than
two horsepower, and must put a
strain of over 1,100 pounds on the
muscles of the wings.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
Caught on the Rebound.

He Cat the window)-"It's very
cheerful within but awfully disagree
able without"
She (coyIy)-"Without what?"
He Gnspired)-'Why, without you,
darling"
And a few weeks later furniture
installment house was called upon to
open d new account
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
Better Left Unsaid

Mr.. Homer-You can't go home
while it is raining so. Stay and have
dinner with us.
Mr.. Witless-Oh, no, thank you. It
isn't as bad as all that,
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
Asked and Answered.

He-What makes you smack your
lips in that peculiar manner?
Shelf you don't like the way l
smack my lips perhaps you had bet
ter smack them yourself.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
Early Steam Motor.

In 1888 an Englishman who hid his
Identity under the pseudonym of Sax
ula," wrote to the London Mechanics
Magazine describing a steam motor
carriage, which he had invented ten
years previously With the article he
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
At a Boarding House.

Stout Man (whose appetite has
been the envy of his fellow boarders)
i declare | have three buttons off
my vest.
Mistress of the House (who has
been aching to give him hint)-You
will probably find them in the dining
room, sir.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
Quite Another Thinu

He was unable to meet his bills. /
understand"
We'll, that's where you're wrong.
He couldn't dodge them"
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
Friendly Advice.

"My father died of water on the
BRAIN" remarked the man from Ohio
Let it be a warning to you" re-
piled the Kentucky colonel, land stop
drinking the stuff before it is too
late"
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
An Easv One.

But how am to know when l am
in love?" asked the young debutante.
When you think as much of man
as you do of yourself replied the
woman of the world, that is love-"
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1903-03-03
Half Qualified.

I'D like to be a Judge" said the
chronic loafer. They amt got nuthin'
ter do but set on the bench all day an
look wise"
We'll" said the grocer, you could
do the settin' on the bench all right"