Evening capital. (Annapolis, Md.) 1884-1910, 1903-09-24
n HAD A IOOIRACAE

that the toothache was with him, ne
even hooked cheerful. He threw out
his chest until he had to take In his
belt. A steely glitter appeared In MS
eye.
"And now" he muttered TO himself
'.and now I'll be a philosopher. who
looks on pain as a paltry thing and
who By the triumph Of mind reduces
the agony OF matter. Exactly
That Is what Stebbins said to him.
self when he first fully realized that
the toothache was visiting him. lie
went around his daily tasks with set
face. He muttered to himself. 'On,
pain, thou art not an evil"
Yes, Stebbins seemed to have an
idea that II he acted philosophicaily
and kept right on assuring pain that
n was not an evil, the toothache
would throw up the job In disgust.
But II was not that kind OF tooth
ache. It was a persistent. searching
affair, and belonged to no labor unions
that limited its hours Of work. It was
a progressive American toothache,
and by its more intelligent efforts II
nut the pauper toothaches OF Europe
far in the shade. II was a hustler, a
demon, and a contortionist OF tooth
ache. and It kept on working all the
time. sometimes at full speed, but
more often at a disconcerting KIND OF
a Jog trot.
In a few days Stebbins had changed
his mind about pain being an evil.
The names that he called that tooth
plainly showed that he considered II
wicked enough to please the most fas'
tidious In such matters. And the
toothache was narrowing Stebbins In,
First he gave up toast, then small
steaks. then corned beef hash brown
cd in the pan. Then he generalized.
In rapid succession he stopped eating
sweet things. hard things. sour things
soft things. hot things and cold
things. This left Stebbins very hun
cry. He tried bread crumbs In luke
warm water time or two but II
looked like a poultice and Stebbins
didn't like It. naturally enough. And
yet the toothache thrived on 1t.
But one day he came across an ear
of corn in Egypt This was in the form
Of a painless dentistry parlor where
teeth were extracted without pain un.
der a guarantee.
Stebbins entered that dentistry
parlor with a resolute air. He brush
ed aside the attendant and went into
one Of the little sitting rooms and
climbed into a chair. Here he moan
ed dismally until a scandalized doctor
ran in to quiet him.
They'll think you're being treated, y
objected the doctor.
"M-m-m-mw moaned Stebbins. He
gave the impression that he was toe
far gone for articulation.
(which tooth Is it?"
"M-m-m-m! replied Stebbins
stretching his mouth to the utmost
and pointing to the offending molar.
Surely you are not going to have
that outr protested the doctor. II
would seem as II he had never heard
of such a thing before.
"M-m-m.mr murmured Stebbins, In
weary affirmation.
"why, man, you'll spoil your looks
every time you SMILE" enjoined this
outraged doctor.
'The deuce you sayr' said Stebbins
quickly sitting up. "Have you got
hand mirrorT
For the next five minutes Stebbns
was smiling at himself and noticinf
the effect It would make If the ach
ing tooth was pulled.
you really ought to have It filed
remarked the doctor.
"Then you think II would show II
had It outY persisted Stebbins.
"why. my dear sir, wouldn't have
Il out for one thousand dollars II i
was my TOOTH"
"But will It hurt?" asked Stebbins
with the air Of man who is elm
duishing his last argument.
you'll never feel It," replied The
doctor confidently.
"Then go ahead" ordered Stebbins
opening his mouth with great ambi
ton.
Stebbins says that II he lives to HI
as old as Methuselah he'll never for
get that next fifteen minutes. FRS
the dentist got long thin instrument
and poked at the tooth. 1t was evi
IDENTIFY his idea to irritate the nerve
and make 1t angry, and so entice I
to jump out. About every other poke
the instrument hit the nerve. The doc
tor was informed Of this by the tele
Oranhic maintenance of Stebbi1s',
eyeballs and the increased intensit.
Of his muffed language. A man can
not give full justice to his outraged
feelings when he has his mouth prop
ped open to the point of rupture.
Now" said the dentist, affably
I'VE have the nerve exposed: 90 wei
Just put in a treatment to kill It.
"But will II hurtY' asked Stebbins
you'll never feel IT," repeated tn
doctor with increased confidence.
Accordingly. Stebbins sat back Il
his chair again with an anxious an,
haggard eye. Again he opened hi
mouth and clenched his hands. TIL
doctor put drop Of liquid on a bit O
cotton and jabbed this affair on tn
exposed nerve. The nerve had beel
fretting about that exposure for som
little time, and now, at this furthe
indignity, there was trouble. In fact
n the doctor had not removed his in
strument with remarkable speed Stet
bins would have bit It in two.
: BELLS, bellsp calculated. Stebbins
"Beils. bellsl" he repeated. Thi