The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1903-10-14
THE NONPAREIL MAN
Casually observed.

-
A Philadelphia poet has grievance as
big as a doorknob. He sent to the paper
"a little thing that he had dashed off in
a moment of Inspiration beginning:
Stay here near me- OH my treasure
Cried l: Run not off SO far;
Let us try loves Turing measure
While our lives the richest are
Either he had dashed it off too rapidly,
so that the writing was illegible, or, the.
| proofreader had been out late the night
before and slumbered for the first line
| came out in print thus:
| stay here near me, oh. my trousers
The poet was aWfully cross about it,
complaining that the beauty of the lines
had BEEN married. Some people are very
particular about what they write
| A gentleman with a bullying brow sends
in some higher calculus made up of equal
parts alphabet and Coptic script to prove
that Ann, the lady of the problem is IS
years old. When we asked Ann her age
she said, modestly, "between 16 and ~ =
and we do not care to dispute lady. The
gentleman with the bullying brow may be
| technically right, but it is best to let
| Ann have her way in matters that con-
! Germ her SO vitality. .---.-
| Lieutenant Peary will have some diff
fculty in climbing the pole. Because Of
the chlliness during his last trip he has
but three toes left.
!
Some of the democratic papers are won-
dering what a fine young widow like Mrs.
Janeway can see in Tootsie Platt, the
/ New York boss, that she wants to marry
him. It's a pretty good scheme to let
people, especially widows play their own
matrimonial games, without Inference.
"Plattsie'' doubtless had few sugary ar
gumentS up his sleeve that the harsh
world knows nothing about. When folks
are playing the matrimonial game, We
intend to wear binders.
The names of the various Mrs. Jolo, the
widows of the sultan, have just been
learned. Translated, the ladies are Mines.
Scent of Lilies, Hearts Desire, Hon
ey of Life, Dancing Sunbeam, Blush
of Morning, Oasis in the Desert, Moon
Upon the Waters, Song of Nightingales.
Whisper of the West Wind and Rose in
Bloom. Not a bad bunch for heather
potentate to play tag with.
John w Kennedy of Denver, riding up
! Seventeenth street in that city his
wheel, disputed a crossing with an cleo
trio car and the surgeons are now work.
ing on his case, Three years ago Mr..
Kennedy was in a wreck on the Denver
& Rio Grande but came out whole. A
short time afterwards the train on the
Colorado Midland went to pieces while
Mr.. Kennedy was inside. He was badly
, shaken up but no bones were broken. In
several other wrecks Mr.. Kennedy has
had narrow escapes. Near Trinidad he
! was pir ned beneath some heavy tinbers
of burning coach, but was rescued in
the very nick of time. In other accidents
Mr.. Kennedy has been hardly so fortu-
" nate. About twelve years ago he fell
: from a high derrick, receiving injuries
which he was several years in getting
n over. When boy two falls that he re-
t ceived, one from a swing and another
r from trapeze, nearly proved fatal. In
It the latter instance it was thought that
g his spine was broken, but he made a
e now print Mr.. Kennedy's picture and
S when he travels. press correspondents
s along the line keep watch out for
It trouble. Mr.. Kennedy is but % years OF
: age and the accident insurance Ompanies
d carry their fingers crossed when he is Off
= the sofa.
q Medical Talk a magazine devoted to
, the art of sickness, says:
y, Don't jump up the first thing your eyes are
. open. The vitality is lowered and the circula-
- - ton is not SO strong. A sudden spring out of
IL bed is shock to these organs, especially the
:, heart, as ct starts to pumping the blood sud
:. denly Take your time in getting up Yawn
and stretch. Wake up slowly.
Notice how the baby wakes up. 1t stretches
y its and legs, rubs its eyes and yawns
= and wakes up slowly. q.
We have never detected this slow pro-
n cess in the baby. AS we recall him, he ex-
e ploded broad awake with a noise that
y ratified some of the plastering off-a
re noise that persisted until he got control
y Of the ball. i. e., the breakfast food.
n Mrs. Fiske has been presenting "Hedda
l. Gabler'' in New York and William Winter
n the veteran critic, tells why he doesn't
,r like Ibsen. The cheerful view that all
-e persons are diseased and are fast hasten
v. ing to the grave and that all flesh is
e baled hay are Ibsens stock in trade. Mr.
# Winter says:
n These remarkably sapient views. with others
- about hereditary diseases. original sin, miscel-
&c laneous hulnbug and taxes-he has been at some
II pains to divuge in series of plays, OF
S, which are nasty and all of which are ponderous
4 and dull. Mrs. Fiske, he continues. produced
# one of these dreary compositions Ga toleraby
- clean one) and acted the principal part. The
IL play is a long winded coloquial exposition of
IS disease, and its heroine is insane No
other phrase can well describe such mon
p, strous union Of vanity and depravity. Some ex-
this vicious and depressing picture Of dizziness
and morbid, madhouse wickedness.
There was an Ibsen play presented in
Minneapolis some time ago at which
l. many sensible or supposedly sensible PEG
t. pie put in miserable evening. This col
al umn was urged to attend, but no. To ge,
ID us to an Ibsen play they would have
Of first, to use chloroform, and then to dras
s. us to the door by means of two yokes o.
stout oxen. We know what we like.
- To the child the most striking featur.
m of the landscape where he was born il
!. likely to be the trees. They are there
RI when he first begins to notice anything a
To all and he grows to love them and to fee
~ companionship with them. They grow
- with his growth and increase with hi
=, strength. Under their shade he dreams
~ his first dreams. The wind in their leave
~ sings him to sleep in summer and h
nestles the closer in his little bed whel
pc he hears the winter winds bowling amor.
nc their bare branches. For many years h
~ knows where every birds home is built
al he knows what high nests and natura
&c lookouts are accessible to his clinging fee
as and what great tops cannot be reache
M even by the most adventurous boy in tn
OF village. He may wander far and many 0
IL the people he knew in youth pass off tn
stage of action When he returns afte
?" many years their faces are not seen; bu
the great trees are there to WELDON
him.
IN. No place abides in memory and affection
il like the spot where, many years ago, tn
as trees of childhood waved their wilder
as, nesses Of leaves over you and unde
,st whose spreading shade you were mrs
its spanked by your devoted mother for say
At ing damn "A. j. r.
IRE -----------
IS SHE CANNOT. MARRY FOR 10 YEAR,
he
err Denver Times.
p Miss Vera Michelena is perhaps the onl
for young woman in the world who ever mad