The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1903-10-04
TO LIMERICK
/ TOWN BY DREAM.
But the Tourist Lacked = Poets
License, So the Copper
Woke Him Up.

But the Tourist Lacked = Poets
License, So the Copper
Woke Him Up.
Last night visited Limerick. travelled
In dream, drawn by four prancing Welsh
rabbits
Why should have chosen Limerick for
my destination l cannot positively say.
but have hazy recollection that just 40
was doing of to sleep chorus Of familiar
voices invited me to-
Come up. come UP. come all the way up
To Limerick town with me-
I distinctly remember finding myself
standing in a large public square. The
only person in sight was fat little man
wearing a cooks cap and apron. went
up to him and asked him where was.
He looked at me with considerable sur.
prise.
why" he said,
u should think you could see that you re here,
And you II always remain here. fear.
For 1t matters not where
You may go. when you're there
You will say to yourself. I am here"
Under ordinary circumstances I should
have thought the man crazy But lots Of
things that would be strange in everys
day life seem matter-of-fact enough when
they crop up in dreams.
-Yes, yes. know I'm here. explained.
what I meant was, what city Is thisS
What's its namep How big 10 1t? Who
are its people, and what do they dor"
If you'd only look where you re going
you'd see where you were when you got
there" said the little man in a way that
made me feel very much ashamed Of my
ignorance. q
/, you're in Limerick, he added in kindliers
tones. How big is it2 Well. 1t ought to
be exactly thirteen feet Three feet In the
first second and fifth lines and two fest
ca oh In the middle two lines. s~..t
"But you can't always tell. Lots %
people are always putting their foot In .
at the wrong time and upeetting every.
thing. That's considered bad form, Of
course, but what are you going to do about
it? -.s
What sort of people have We heres
Bless you, couldn't begin to tell you. We
have all sorts Of people, from all sorts OF
places all doing the most unheard OF sort
of things. For example, once knew Of
a man by the name of Mulaueen. ;:, ~,
Who endeavored to light his dudeen
With dynamite stick. = ., FL
His pipe may have lit.
But cant say the same OF MulQueep.
Even If he never lights he won't b.
missed much. Any man that makes 'stack
rbyme with Tit has no business In Limerick,
anyhow He deserved good blowing UP.
sThen--- S.t
you've probably heard many tlmes
or the woman whose parrot sang chimes.
Her name WINS Miss Barrett: .N1
She hadn't parrot.
But we say that she had cause It rhymes.
"Then there was-Quick, quicki'
The little man seized my hand and started
of across the square dragging mo siter
him.
aLordy. but that was close shavei'
he gasped, when we finally stopped. pant
ing, three blocks up side street.
SWhat was?' l asked. rather angry q
being pulled about 50. m
didn't you see her! The dark VomAO
with the snaky hair? Why. =.
That was the awful Medusa.
For his brass he II atone .,
BY being turned into stone. - 6
As for her-itll simply 6naa1s ~,
.she's head OF the Limerick Municipal
| Art Commission. Whenever she sees any
| one she doesn't like standing in an ape
| propriate site she makes him into q statue.
! That's why we have such ugly ones, sup
pose. You and were standing Just IN the
right position for group, you know
How can ever thank you?' said grate-
fully. "By the way, to whom do owe my
life5 You haven't told me who you are
Me? Why,
~ was a chef In N, Y.
Who never could learn to st. =.
could fry It, and roast 1t,
And broilit. and toast 1t.
aBut as I've already said simply COULDN'T
learn to stew it, 30 left New York and came
here on the same ship with old Paw Tucket
aud his notorious daughter Nan"
-Oh, see, said, feeling that II he had
worked it into the stanza somewhere.
who's the big man running toward us?'
The chef glanced in the direction I
pointed.
aHeavensl" he exclaimed, turning 40
white as sheet. ITS the constable And
He thrust disk-shaped card into my
hand and darted up an alley. Before.
could make up my mind just what to do,
the big man had grabbed me by the collar.
Let's see yer, i license he s.qpxlsd:
license No. 74sss2: Huh, / thought so.
That's the stewed-pork chefs license.
Where's yours?'
"A person don't need poets license to
write limericks,' l replied as haughtily az
l could.
Don't, eh?" he growled, tightening his
grip on my collar who are you, I'd like
to know? What do you know about Linn
erick, anyhow"
then had what foolishly mistook for
q happy inspiration.
Possibly said, you may have heard
of -
The funny old codger from Brockton,
Whomever he saw, why. he Knocked EN-.
Until ONCE
AOhoi" saidthe constable. so 'Brocktons,
rhymes with Knocked EN- does II? You
don't need any poetic license, do your"
Quick as flash he lifted his club and
dealt me a whack on the head that caused
me to wake up away back in New York
where I'd started from. My head Ii sore
from the blow yet. That's why I've got Il
done up in wet towels this morning"
DISTANCE FOOTBALL KICKING.
Spiral Punts Garry NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS.
Yards From Placement In England.
In The SUN of last Sunday week mention
was made Of place kick Of a football In
Great Brit ain of 23l feet inches. A better
idea of the distance may be had by reckon.
ing it in yards-77 yards inches. Our