The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1903-02-27
ANECDOTES
---- FROM
ANYWHERE

o. Dr. Lorenz is a disttne ntertalas,
structor IN the science -asulshed IN. |
amused his guest by an ana greats
pm or the answers retnrn.asng 10 him
PTS IN y course OF their aS from pu.
one o. hem wag In reply ..SaaInninatioa
iion: What muscles have " me CUES.
IN n poplteteal space?n 'neir Origin
Wen. there's that one w,,h ~.
,ohs name. and I don't reme s,e d
congressman Moon ne
see was on the bench Of that .aennss.
a..orney general who collaborstas!se, III.
ann Q Q season wearied hin viii
aeai with much speaking and a s@a
area MIN with laxity in pract,coa aspss
During the trial of a crimins,
sne at.orhey general was about eass
uress himself to the argument -, az
inr the iudse M ma arose. Addrms,
Now. II your honor please
to give me your careful 90. ! ask YOU
a few minutes. for I am eoinn .lon 70
sense" D soitg to taxi /
You shall have my carefu, o,
MI. Attorney General" ren, ilenasa
judge, and I shall instruct tba 10y
to enforce the strictest ordar sheHs
part OF members of the bar ana va ue
: Q You are about to tre,t Spssa.
you Keep your promise, to a mos, 10 !
tcal Innovation ""' Esd.
In "A Man OF His Wcrd" t,o
piete novel In Ltppincotts. nv AM AN.
Duer Miller, an engagement hepins "
this fashion: 'Esins in
"One minute! I ought 70 "a,
nrst that ! don't love you. You rath..
excite me. and / like to be with " az
ana, OF course, / am glad other VOW wv.
like you, and that you are ricb m n
all that, but / don't love, no, IN s,u
cry least. II that contents vo,@ ,e
It more than contents ma, OWL,
Dickie eagerly. my disposition il Sasu
peculiar. ! hate to be loved. II fp,s..
me dreadfuliy. / should dislike notss
ing Q than to be married to a won.
an who loved me. I derive comtnr
from tie thought that you are moe
unlikely to do SO. II you should ayss
reel the slightest impulse to do so, prav
piness., Aap-
Do you really meaa what YOU sap
asked Miss Fame, half amused. hi,
,ptqued. ""
Il never said anything in nv ,to
that ] meant half as sincerely, Dick
answered ~fervently.
Why, then, / may accept you with
a clear conscience, for I don't supposa,
she added, with the cheerful assurance
OF youth-T don't suppose that von
could have found q woman less Likely
to fall In love
Capital Dyson cried with eptbu.
siasm. You could not say anything
that would give me more pleasure
Are you quite SURE that you will
always remain equally content to do
all the loving for both Of US? asked
b with pardonable vanity.
Quite sure"
No one who has ever interviewed
Senator Depew can deny his magnetic
personality. Every newspaper man is
his friend. He Is never annoyed, never
angry, and never appears as if taken By
surprise. A funny incident 1 witnessed
when he was president Of the Contra!
road will illustrate his ready wit: L
went to his office to interview him and
was asked by his secretary, Captain
Harry du Val, to go In and sit down a
few minutes. I entered and sat down
in a corner Mr.. Tepew saw me, but a
woman who had seen more tran fifty
summers sat facing him, not dreaming
that a third person was in the Office.
She was talking animatedly, and her
corkscrew curls, denoting spinsterhood,
fairly shook underneath her hat. The
senator's clear-cut and often witty re-
plies evidently delighted the woman.
She rose facing him: and now, Mr.
Depew, II more point; what would
you advise me t do-invest in real es-
= ~ . - cba L ~--aA 1871 - 4 -
chair and replied: There are two
real estate and women" AS quick as a
flash she stopped and kissed him, said
goodby, and walked majestically out.
He never fiinched or seemed surprised,
but as I advanced toward him, he
beamed as he said: Those are merely
the nerquisites OF my Office; no railroad
president is exempt"
/: :
Among the favorite stories of Sen.
ator Hoar Is a tale OF a remarkable
toad, possessed Of an intuitive knowl-
edge of antidotes. i.
Il was out in my garden one day.
said the senior member from Massa-
chusetts, land noticed a toad hopping
along toward the yeranda- At the edge
Of the low flooring was a spiders Weo
straight across his path. Mr.. Toad aio
not observe II. and plump he LANDED
squarely in 1t. This unceremonious
and burglarious entrance naturally
provoked the resident spider, who was
strongly OF the opinion that his home
was his castle. Accordingly he pro
ceeded to give the toad a most vicious
bite. Instantly the toad hoped back
on the lawn, found a bit OF plantaih
leaf and chewsd 1t. Then back De
hoped and hit the same obstructlol,
with the result that he got another
bite. Seven times he repeated the az.
tempt, each time going back to tns
plantain for an antidote for his
wounds. At last he succeeded In oe,
molishing the spiders web n hoppeA
on his way rejoicing"
When William K. Vanderbilt was a.
Harvard he was oil OF the most dsh",
cratic students there. despite the fact tla.
he had millions at his command. man!
say that he carried It too far, and IN M
dress was decidedly careless. about INA,
time the Tyrtter happened to be conneclss
with a local morning PAPER and pupnsne.
o scoop story on the great goi1 ilnrm1
that William X. Vanderbilt was TO ta's
laid out for his private use at Lexington.
The day OF the publication OF the SUI.
there came into the editorial rooms OIL Wv
paper a young fellow who, In the languate ~
Of the office boy who had corralled nm
and demanded to know his business w.
"a u what needed a job" His trouses,
bagged at the knee; in fact, his cio'us,
looked rs IL the person who had them y,