The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1903-12-08
HONEST ABE, U. s. M.
He Still Sticks to Poetry and His
Mail Route.

] found Uncle Josh White at his
farm house gate the other day as 7
drove up with a letter. but noticed
when was yet quarter of mile
away that his white locks and vener-
able whiskers had been dyed jet
black by the village barber. Uncle
Josh is seventy-two years old and has
five hundred wrinkles on his face. and
the black hair and whiskers made him
look too funny for anything
"Hullo, l said as I drove up, but
what's become of Uncle Josh7 I don't
remember to have seen him lately"
Uncle Josh is around. 1 guess" he
answered. with a pleased look.
he'd gone out west. Just give. him
this letter and my best respects"
Abe. don't We know me?" he asked,
as he took the letter.
reckon -
Look again"
by John. If it amt Uncle Josh him
self! Well. well. Say. Uncle Josh. if
I'd say you were going out to play
'two-o.d-cat' with the kids. Gone right
back to thirty years old. and as good
looking chap as can be found in the
country. How did you do it -
Abe he said. as he stroked his
whiskers and kept one eye on the
house, L was waitin' for you. You are
q truthful man. Mebbe you know what
how old look jest as 1 stand here?
If you was 81 stranger what would you
guess my age to be?''
I'D say from thirty to thirty-ave.
Uncle Josh-not day more"
wouldn't We say forty-five2"
Never. I'd allow up to thirty-ave
and then bet two to one"
Then that settles it, and they may
blow till they can't blow no longer.
It's the hair and whiskers. Abe. I've
had EN- fixed uo a bit, and Sarah and
Bill have been jumpin' on me about
II. They both say look to be ninety,
and that I haint got the sense of a
hen to go and color up. 1 couldn't see
that looked over forty. and you say
that don't look over thirty-hve, and
they may talk and be hanged to 'em."
And what's in the wind, Uncle
Josh?" I said. as gave him a wink.
KIN you keep it. Abe?"
'.Of course"
Then it's the new wilder that's
moved on to the old Frazer farm. Seen
her yit?"
No"
wall. she's a daisy Only thirty
five, handsome as an alarm clock and
wuth $4,000. Abe. I'm on her trail"
"Shoo, Uncle JOSH"
"On her trail, Abe, and bound to
overhaul her. stopped there the 9TH
er day to see if she wanted to buy
any hogs, and fell in love with her
before she had opened her mouth. Her
name is Snyder now, but I'll make
her change 1T to White within a year
or break my back a-tryin. I've told
Sarah and Bill so, and they are maxim
things mighty hot for me. They say
I've got one foot in the grave and
won't live year. but you see how lit
tie they know about it."
And so you are going to propose
to the widow Snyder, chr" I asked,
when 1 had got my breath back.
Jest as sure as turnips is turnips,
Abe, and I amt goin' to waste much
time about it either. I want to begin
courtin' right away and that's where
you come in
But can't court for you
7 don't want you to. The day I
called the wilder and me talked mostly
about hogs and cows, but she let it
tender feelin' for poets. You are a
poet, Abe, and a gaul burned good
. one"
.And you want her to fall in love
You don't see nuthin' Of the sort.
want you to do me the biggest favor
on earth by writin me some poetry
and lettin' me pass it off as my own
amt Offering We money down, but
I'm saytn' that from the day 1 marry
the wilder Snyder your hay, oats, but
ter and 'taters won't cost we a red
cent. Sarah and Bill have gone to
town today, and you jest come in for
a glass of milk and a piece of pie and
start that courtin' off for me-
Half an hour later 1 had turned the
wheel and ground out:
You may tell me of mountains and
valleys and streams
OF dells midst the tall whisperin
pines;
OF meadows that charm and waters
that roll
AS the sun in the west doth decline.
'You may sing me the song of the sad
nightingale;
You may sing me the sweet robins
lay;
You may capture the notes of the gray
And praise up the notes of the jay.
You may tell of the rose as it blooms
b. the door
You may talk of the tulip and pink;
You may Gull me the choicest and
rarest of blooms.
But 1 shall continue to think
'That nothing on earth can compare
Oh. would that I now stood beside
her!
To show to the world the tu-mul-tu-
Gus love
I've got for the wilder named Sny-
der"
Uncle Josh had sat beside me at the
kitchen table as I wrote, sometimes
trying TO read line without his
glasses, and again gazing into vacancy
and uttering long signs. When 1 had
finished / read the poem to him and
asked how he liked it.
ABE he replied. as he brought his
fist down on the table, 1.-The wilder
Snyder is mine from this hour. There
hain't no wilder on earth who kin
stand up agin SIGH poetry assthat. It'll
wobbIe her from head to heel and all
I've got to do is to foller it up by
askin' her to have me. By thunder,
Abe, but IMl put them verses agin any
mans million dollars and win out. If
I'd sot down and tried for a million
years I couldn't have done half SO
we'll"
Were your hair and whiskers dyed
when you called at the widow'sY"
asked as he followed me out to the