The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1903-12-05

TOOLS, anu one Oh the virtues OK Cn6 LlInlQ.
Better sit silent than fall into such an
error as the above. The error Of the
clever and the tactless:
Cherish opinions and convictions, but
be careful how your express them.
Express your approval Of those you both
like and admire. but preserve an amiable
reserve when that Of which you disap
prove, or those you dislike, chance to be
under discussion. Remember that your
next neighbor at table, or in a group on
the tennis court, may be the sister Of
the individual you have vigorously con-
demned, or the author of the book you
found so stupid.
BY following this principle Of discreet
silence you are merely observing the gold
en- rule, and you will, therefore, never be
| a terror to your hostess and too COM
mon stumbling block in the way Of social
progress will be removed from your path.
The tactful tall5er again Is one who has
not an emphatic habit Of speech.
The tactful talker does not use many
foreign or unusual words in the course
of conversation, and he is never guilty Of
| the shocking solecism Of interrupting the
| speech Of others.
1t displays infinite tact when you do not
| attempt to correct the pronunciation Of
others by promptly and correctly using
a word that has just been incor-
rectly spoken Remember the good sense
and delicacy displayed by the regent
George, who drank his tea from the saucer
because an aged and old-fashioned gen.
| tleman who came to see him followed this
| Anticipated custom. 81
| A cardinal principle in tactful CONVEX
sation is to avoid arguments, unless you
know when and how gracefully to with
draw before friction has excited heat.
Graceful Little Speeches.
Learn to use them. They please every
| body, and they have a. very important
place in daily life and daily talk.
Il beg pardon?" for instance, is moro
graceful than What say?" when re-
mark has escaped your ear.
Show stimulating appreciation Of the
conventional efforts of companion by
using now and then the expressions, How
Interestingly or won't you tell me more
Of your experiences?" or "You tell that
very well; I can almost see it as it hap
pened.'
When you part from man or woman
who has striven to be agreeable, do not
fail to express pleasure in his or her talk
Say, If you like, II am sorry you must
go; I have so enjoyed this converse
tion," or Il hope I may soon meet you
again; this little talk with You has given
me great pleasure"
If you are not fluent conversational
list yourself, these little phrases go far to
show how highly you estimate the talents
Of others, and they thus compensate
| largely for your shy silence.
Should your conversation suffer inter-
rupt1on or your attention be called away
be sure to say first to your companion
Excuse me for an Instant Slight as
these courteses seem, they carry the
greatest influence with them, and YOU
cannot afford to neglect them.
Be an Inspiring Influence.
A witty French writer has said, 'Tc
know how to be silent is more profitabl
than to know how to speak,
Pray do not make the mistake of think
) ing that the whole art of charming con
versation lies in talking yourself. Some
in fact, very great deal Of it, +dwells ii
= knowing how to make others talk. Their,
: is no secret in this
The way to inspire the eloquence of 9th
: ers is to observe all the afore -mentfonet
rules, and then supplement them by neye
Do not be egotistical. 1t is a distressin.
habit, and discouraging to others.
Never challenge the statements Of other
= nor contradict them, unless it is a ques
e ton Of your own honor or that of a frien,
that is involved.
If a stranger wishes to talk to you o
r her baby's measles, or his score at golf
subordinate yourfown interests to that o
8 your companion, and hear cheerfully al
r that he or she has to say.
S Never answer briefly when a kindly dis
posed person is trying to talk to you, an,
r do not wear sad, sorry, stolid, or super
= cilious expression Of countenance L
t short there is royal road to popularit
S thru conversation, but you must learn it
s can stride along at a free gait and gathe
h all the sweets that ornament its way; blu
t always remember that your popularity wi
4 be measured by your egreeability.