davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12
THE JOKE or A SCIENTIST

When Prof. Joseph lie Conte was
taking scientific excursion with
Agassiz, he ventured OH a little pleas.
antry, to beguile the time. They had
gone by sailing vessel TO the Mar
quesas, and thence into the Dry Tor
tugas.
The day after their arrival Profess
sor lie Conte was sent to examine a
little island, about ten miles away,
and having done 1t he remained there
becalmed all the next day. The wa
ter was about twenty feet deep, a
splendid place for dive.
lie Conte stripped and plunged over
board, and amused himself by pluck
ing sponges and corals from the bot
tom. While he was thus engaged an
old-time naturalist who had Joined the
party, something to Agasslz's disgust,
came padding round the ship In a lit
tie boat.
lie Conte, to the delight OF the sail
ors looking on, took hold of the keel
behind, lay on his back. with his legs
unuer the boat ana MS head hidden by
the stern, and began TO swim back
ward.
The boat mysteriously moved the
wrong way, and the harder the old
gentleman padded the more 1t resisted
him. Still 1t moved backward.
He was alarmed. Some devil-fis
was evidently running away with
him. He peered over the gunwale. but
saw nothing. Now he padded fran
tically, his strength increased by ter
ror; but still the boat slipped back.
Finally the unlocking sailors laughed
so hard that the joke could be carried
on no longer, and lie Conte, fearful of
an avenging paddle On his head
swan swiftly away,
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12
TINS JEWEL DAZZLED REED.
Ex'conRressman Campbell Tells of
Trlump hs Won with His Diamond.

Ex.ConRressman Campbell Tells of
Trlum phs Won with His Diamond.
ExCongressman Tim Campbell Is
still bemoanlng the loss of his 5000
diamond stud, or headlight" as he
called 1t. which was feloniously lift
ed from his shirt front by pickpock-
cts on a Grand street car recently,
says the New York World.
THAT spark" said Tim sadly. was
a corker and no mistake. 1t made
friends for me wherever | went and,
what's more, pushed me to the front
on every great and festive OCCASION
"The spark had history to be proud
of. | wore 1t on state occasions and
whenever | went to a high and infiu-
entail dignltary of the United States
government to obtain soft snap for
one of my political constituents.
was a member of Washington society
when | was a representative in Con
gress and | would also wear the spark
on those most suspicious occasions.
"The late Speaker Reed" continued
the ex-Congressman, had great re-
spect and admiration for the gem.
"'Tlm,' said Mr.. Reed to me one
day L want you to do me great ia
yor. want you to wear that diamond
every time you get up in the house to
make one of your famous speeches.
Certainly, Mr.. Speaker said l; 4
am only too glad to serve you.
thank you for this compliment
II kept my word to the speaker and
whenever 1 would get up and speak
he would thank me for It.
Tim he said 10 me, after | COM
pleted my last speech In the House of
Congress, 4 shall never forget the
happy moments which | spent listen
ing to you, which at the same time
afforded me an opportunity to look at
your most magnificent diamond
President Cleveland" continued the
great Tim, was also a most enthusi-
astic admirer of my lost gem. Every
time | would go TO the White House
to ask favor OF the President he
at the diamond. Knowing that he was
fond of the diamond | had made II
my business TO wear IL every time
went to the White House. called 1t
my lucky star because whenever /
wore It was always sure of landing
soft political job for one of my
friends In the district"
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12
FOR WORK AND LIBERTY.



"There Is many way to win In
this world" said Mark Twain In ona
of his serious moments, but none Of
them Is worth much without good hard
work back OF It," The New York Sun
says that the reason immigrants ara
pouring into America Is that they want
work Many an immigrant talks of
work before anything else, because.
dimly or clearly. he sees that work and
plenty of opportunity TO work are at
the basis of higher living and liberty.
Jan Jablonskl. who came from Prus.
sian Poland the other day, is repre-.
sentative OF this class.
why have you come over here, Jan
Jablonskiy" asked the Interpreter
For work." was the answer.
And isn't there any work TO he
done in Poland?" went on the inter.
prefer
Yes, but there is more work TO he
done here. My brother lives In Chi.
cage lie wrote me that here you can
get up in the world, and you can sure.
~ tbhNAAt Jun Nhiiuitn.
And which do you want to do the
most?" asked the interpreter.
'.'ro work hard TO take care of nv
three sons and two daughters and
educate them" was the answer.
This desire to make better home
for the children and TO Mt them more
properly for life has strong hold ON
thousands OF the fathers and mothers
who arrive In this country.
Little Freda Is In school the whole
year round writes relative or a
friend In America.
MY Tony stands at the head of
his class" is another message sent to
the Old World home.
In such manner Is America held I'D
TO Old World parents as the chlldrens
paradise. aud thousands Of immigrant
fathers and mothers, who tell the blue
clad officers that they come here 10
work, come In truth 10 work for the
clinging broods that they bring with
them.
MY wife and |" said Antonio Sa.
brolla, from Rome, TO the interpreter
will work for the children and send
them TO school and make them like
your children
But how about yourself and yout
wifei Won't you become Americans,
toof" questioned the interpreter.
sabrolla shrugged his shoulders
I'VE are DID, he answered "A bent
oliye-tree full-grown cannot be made
straight. II Is enough for us to work
TO make our children like yours
ITO be left alone at your work and
in your home, and not have your prop
eriy and liberty taken away by the
soldiers was Firms answer.
Concern for their children may he
said to be one OF the chief reasons that
leads many parents TO come 20 this
country, and herein may be found the
reason why the second generation Is
30 easily absorbed in the American
body polite, while the first clings te.
naciously to Old World customs.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12

possible that you are really here
doesn't It. Tommy
lie looks real TO me-" replied the
smiling Brother Tom, rs he landed Il
heavy thump on Brother Jlm's broad
shoulder.
And how delightfully."- pleased this
pretty girl seemed. Was 1t an assumed
delight? He looked around at Tommy
and caught him grinning.
And what charming little feast
they had. and what a delightful little
mistress of the household the fair girl
made
And after dinner Brother Tom drew
Brother Jim away from the lovely pres
ence and took him for n stroll TO the
little lake.
"Wellf' said Brother Tom, as they
trudged down the shadowy pathway
between the trees.
"Wellf" echoed Brother Jim.
Mice, isn't she?'
Every NICE
did | make 1t too strong about
herr
rs this confidential conversation: :"
inquired Brother Jim, with short
laugh.
1T is Brother Tom replied.
And not word to be repeated to
any third partyT"
Not a word
well, then" said Brother Jim, you
didn't make II strong enough"
Whereat Brother Tom landed Il
heavy blow from puny fist in the
midst of Brother Jims waistcoat.
Good old Jimmyr' he cried.
And then 1t was that Brother Jim
put a heavy hand on Brother Toms
shoulder.
See here" he gruffiy said. where
is that black-mustached fellow with
the snaky eyes,"
"0h, l just made him up" said
Brother Tom.
And Brother Jim suddenly laughed
w. X. Rose, In Cleveland Plain
Dealer
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12
Wi h Marginal Notes.

81 have only a speaking ac-
quaintance with jokes" said learned
man, In great humility. II know that
by the way take them. IL | don't
ask to have them explained to me, |
am conscious OF consuming desire to
explain them to others" This tenden.
cy to fit witticlsm with a common
tary is widespread. The New York
Tribune says that John b. Cough, in
one of his lectures, told the story of
two poets, an old one and young
one. who spent an evening together.
The younger man suggested that
they collaborate on book of verse
but the other answered haughtily
would you hitch horse and an ass to
getherT
my dear SIR" retorted the younger
man. in all honesty, why should you
call yourself an ass?
When the lecture was over Mr.
Cough walked home with the friend
with whom he was to spend the night
would you mind" said the latter
gravely, explaining to nae the poin
of that story about the two poets?'
We'll" said Mr.. Cough, slightly con
fused, 81 suppose the point lies In tn,
deftness with which the young maj
made the old one call himself an ass.
But" demonstrated the other, ''th'
old poet didn't mean that he was tn
ass. He meant that he was the horse.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12
PEACH 10 AN ALMOND.
Wrongly Named Fruits and Vegeta'
bIe.-Oniou Once n Flower.

bIes-Onfou Ouce n rloWeFs
There are few more wrongly named
things in the world than the Jerusalem
artichoke. In the first place, 1t never
came from jerusalem at all, and In
the second, 1t is not really an arti.
choke, but a sunfower with Its tubers
developed by cultivation. Cultivation
has done wonders for fruits and yege
tables.
For. instance, through Its means
peaches, apricots and nectarlnes have
been developed from the almond, to
which family all three fruits belong.
There is little apparent connection
between the wild crab of the hedge
rows and a newtown plppin. but both
are members of the same genus In
deed, 1t is from this same Wild crab
apple that the whole of the 100 odd
existing varieties of apples have been
raised.
Technically speaking, too, the pear Is
an apple; and so is the medlar and the
mountain ash, which latter is not an
ash at all.
Is a turnip cabbage? Yes; one va
riety at least of 1t is. This Is the
queer vegetable known as kohlrabi.
which, although classed by scientists
among the brasslca, or cabbage, fam
lily. has huge roots just like turnip.
The cucumber is really fruit, and
not vegetable. The same remark
applies to the tomato, which is really
a fruit also.
The gooseberry Is eurrant. II Is
not the least like 1t In either appear
anee or flavor yet both belong TO the
same family of rlbes.
The onion is charming little flower,
its various species bearing white, vel
low. blue and rose-colored blossoms.
many produced In beautiful dropping
clusters. Originally the onion was II
plant, but the cultivation Of
certain of Its varieties has produced
the now world-famous vegetable
When is chestnut not a chestnut
This is another of the curlosities OF
the classification of horticultural nom
enclature The horse chestnut is aes-
eulus, and the other kind castanea.-
Stray Stories.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12

president Roosevelt" said n Wash.
lngton official, has always been foe
to dallylng. | remember once, when
he was Assistant Secretary OF the
Navy, some measure or other was I'M
der discussion, but. as so often hap
pens, there was postponement, there
was red tape.
''He rose suddenly one, afternoon.
The session had lasted an hour aud
nothing whatever had been done
'Gentlemen,' he said. II God had
referred the ark to a committee on
naval affairs like this, It's my opinion
that 1t wouldn't have been built yet p"
Boston Post.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12

The comparative influence Of men
and women teachers upon pupils In
the schools Is question that might
have been discussed with profit many
years ago, when there wese men teach
ers In grammar grades as we'll as In
the high schools But in these days,
when more remunerative fields OF busi-
ness endeayor have allured men away
from the profession of teaching and
have left the schools almost entirely In
the hands OF women, there Is really
nothing to be gained from a discussion
of the question as TO which exerts the
stronger influence upon pupils. The
women are doing the teaching They
viii continue to do most Of 1t, under
present conditions. While this Is all
true, the Testimony" on this question
eollated by Dr. Sanford Bell, of Mount
Holyoke College, in an article in the
Independent, Is not without interest
The chief interest In the data present
ed by DR.. Bell centers In the fact that
II represents the opinions of those who
were at different times In their lives
under the influence of both men and
women teachers. We do not know that
anyone else has taken the trouble to
Systematically compile such testimony.
OF 543 men and 4SS women who re-
eelved their schooling in the Middle
West between the years 1870 and 1895,
and who had come under the teaching
of both men and women. 81 per cent of
the men and so per cent OF the women
testified In favor OF men teachers. The
kinds of influence named In the In
quiries and replies were such as the
"moral upllft and inspiration, the slim
illus 10 the intellectual awakening. the
spur to scholarship, help in getting
clutch upon the vital issues Of life, per-
sonal kindness, special interest enconr-
agement at crises, sympathy when
things seemed crushing, self-reliance,
hints In social graces," etc. Among
the men who testified women teachers
had led In none of these influences;
among the women they had led only
In personal kindness, self-rellance and
social help. With both sexes DIR. Bell
found that the man teacher who had
done most good was one who to a high
degree was "the incarnation Of massive
strength and masterfulness In relation
to vitality significant things" In sum-
ming up his general conclusions he
says that up TO the age of the child
needs the tender, sympathetic patience
and refining influence of women teach
ers. From TO adolescence both sexes
are equally good teachers. During ado
lescence the pupil needs the robust, Wig
orous and masterful influence of strong
men. During all periods" says DIR.
Bell, "the child needs the influence of
both sexes"
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12
casual moralists take different views

Casual moralists take different views
of the moral turpitude Of debt. They
call a debtor anything between thief
and a careless fellow. The former YER
dict Is. of course, too harsh though we
have often heard its justice seriously
maintained, and 1t is certainly more
easily refuted by illustration than by
argument. On the other hand, TO ex-
cuse debt as mere thoughtlessness, as
many upright people do excuse it. 10
clearly absurd. The reason OF this d.
yergence Of judgment Is we think,
this: Debt is a moral disorder, II not
in itself of fatal import. One or two
attacks in youth have as rule no
lasting effects upon character. Again,
debt is often symptomatic Of serious
moral disease, because 1t 10 common
outcome OF the selishness which lies
aft the root of all departure from
state of moral health. Consequently
the man In debt Is much misjudged-
most often, perhaps. on the SIDE OF
lenIency. There are men-and .ney
are almost always in debtor wnom
the words right" and wrong seem
to be replaced by penal ana non.
nenal. They owe money, but that Is
nerbaps the least thing they owe Tney
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12

A missionary to a South African
tribe has translated Bunyan's "Pil-
grim's Progress into the language of
the people. The illustrations have a
modern and unusual aspect, but serve
TO make the story palmer to the under
standing of jewellers In that region.
The slough of despond" is the mud
hole of the weld" Christian starts
from a "kraal" A war dance serves
to represent Vanity Fair. Apollyon is
a formidable creature, having the head
OF a wolf, the scales and tail Of
crocodile, and the eyes of an owl.
Genius like Bunyan's has the whole
world for its sphere of influence, and
the dullest intellect IN the darkest por-
ton may catch some CLEAN OF that
wonderful light.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12

During all these ages nature has IA
yored the growth of forests on the
Pacific mountains providing the pecu-
liar conditions which make them far
different, much greater In size, more
luxuriant, than any other In the world.
OF all the creations of the living world
none Is so great IN size, so majestic In
presence, as the mighty trees of the
Sierra and the Cascades. For here
the air Is always fertile with moist
ure; clouds blown IN from the Pacific
Ocean rest among the mountain sum-
mits, even browning the tops of the
trees themselves. and here discharge
their rain. The soil Is deep and
spongy with centuries OF decomposing
vegetable matter, furnishing an UNI
equaled nurturing place for vegeta.
ton. and there are no extremes of heat
In summer or depths of cold In win
ter, says the Century Magazine.
Every condition has been favorable
to unexampled exuberance of growth.
not only of the largest trees, but of
all manner of underground vine.
shrub and brake. A huge tree falls,
decays and Is yellowed with thick
moss; Immediately scores of young
frs and cedars spring up along the
top of 1.-THE first chance of n bare
spot In the wood. Old burned stumps.
gathering soil in their hollow inte-
rlors. are nurseries for colonies of
young trees, some strong individual
finally shouldering out the others.
growing larger, and, as the mother
stump drops away. sending Its roots
downward into the earth through the
disintegrating textures, until 1t, in
time, becomes a great tree.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12
MONO-RAll ROADS.
Latest Developments of High Speed
Traction Watched with Intere.t.

Latest Developments OF High Speed
Traction Watched with Interezt.
Electrical experts and transportation
managers of this country are watching
with interest the latest developments
of hlgh-speed traction, as indicated by
the construction Of the "mono-rail"
line between Manchester and Liver.
pool, England, the Berlin-Hamburg
tests IN Germany and the 'lmlted"
service between Cleveland and Toledo.
All these represent different types of
locomotlon. The German tests are
practically continuation of those
made two years ago on the Berlin
Zossen short military line, and are to
determine the practlcabllity of main
tanning high speeds with both steam
and electric locomotives. The "mono-
rail' system Is development of the
idea which In this country took the
forms OF the Melgs electric railway
and the Boynton bicycle railway. In
spite of those who laughed Mt the in
yentor who year after year appeared
at the State House seeking an exten.
sion of the time In which to build his
experimental line from Boston to
Brockton, the Boynton bicycle railway
contained an Idea which is being ap-
piled practically abroad, and which had
vitality enough to Withstand not only
the flercest attacks of competitive sys-
tens, but ridicule enough to have
crushed out a worthless scheme. The
experimental lines of the "mono-ra
type which exist as ruins at Coney
Island and Patchogue are monuments
to the germ of an Idea which Is full OF
possibilities. And the great railroads
know it.-Boston Transcript
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12
Told In the Side Show.

The beautiful fat lady pceped over
her fan at the celebrated glass eater
"Ando, were you really on the verge
of starvation In the wlds of Ala ska 2"
she asked, tlmidly.
WAS ~ echoed the glass eater.
why for six days | didn't have any
thing to eat but an old pair of specta
cles and a thermometer"
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12

Although Professor Wiley has not
yet made public his report of the ex-
perlments which the Department Of
Agriculture conducted upon the yolun-
teers who lived for a time upon pre-
served meats, he has given out some
Interesting facts. One is that meat
prepared with boric acid reduces per
manently the weight of those who eat
1t regularly, and also lessons the
amount of nitrogen In the body. Here
is something for the fat mems clubs
TO consider
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12

Many interesting essays have been
written upon the vanity OF women.
The beauty doctors" in New York
could write equally interesting essays
on the vanity of man, as a large part
OF their practice comes from men who
ask to have their noses Strengthened or
their ears made TO set more closely TO
the head, or TO have wrinkles removed
from their foreheads or about their
eyes, or even TO have dimples made in
their cheeks. A patient must pay $50
for dimple. $3.50 for new nose of
celluloid. A paraffin nose costs only
500, but II Its wearer becomes over
heated the nose will melt and get out
of shape. But no woman who has seen
her husband dress for party needs
such evidence of male vanity rs the
beauty doctors can furnish.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12
The Poor Fellow,

Wantanno What is the matter vito
Scadsi ! notice lie has his arm In q
sling.
Duzno-He was recently taken 5!ta
severe ease OF coupon-clpprrs' par
alysis. Baltimore American.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12

This outstanding of the Orient is a
serious menace tc this country. as 1t
will eventually shut out American
goods from the markets OF North Chi
ma. At the present time we enjoy
considerable trade with that part of
the world, but as Russia invariably
retains Russian soil for the use of Rus
STA, this trade. instead of increasing,
will be apt to decrease unless Russia s
plans are baked by greater show
of strength than has yet been dis
played.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12

Mrs. Rivers-Harry, we won't be
able to go out In our automobile to-
morrow
Mr. Rivers Qn surprise)-Why not Z?
Mrs. Rivers-Because the people
next door have borrowed all our gaso.
line TO go In their launch.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12

never return kindness or help. or JUS
tlce, even. and certainly not affection.
should anyone be SO unfortunate as TO
have let them have any. They behave
decently or not, according TO the nice
ty with which they are able TO calcu-
late consequences.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12
To the Point.

Ascum-Did you tell him that when
he started that report about you he
was guilty of n malicious lie?
Short-Not In so many words.
Ascum--N0?
Short-No, ] merely said, You're
liar. "-Phlladelphla Press.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12

There is reason to fear that many
persons will be disappointed when the
North Pole finally is discovered and
the photographs of the locality fail to
show the pole
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12
A Programme OF Inquiry.

There was a man who once disbursed
Much coin. He had great fun with It
They asked, Where did he get it?' first,
Then sighed. what has he done with
It'll"
w eshington Star.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12

The British government has In
slon. II this is the price of silence In
the future, We can understand the
raise"
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12

They had duel in Havana the 9TH
er day in which wax bullets were used.
This indicates q subtle French infiu-
ence which 1t might be wise for
Americans TO watch carefully.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12
Quite a Dangerous Woman.

Mrs. Talkyer-Blind can say some of
the most cutting things"
Eyes. II she could only keep her
mouth closed for FIVE minutes you
could have her arrested for carrying
concealed weapons. "-Life.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12

Now that n cure for lockjaw has
been discovered, the toy pistol makers
will consider II burning shame II
there Is any further interference in
their business.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-11-12

There is a new animal called the
"zebrula." 1t Is compromise be-
tween the horse and the zebra, but is
striped like the latter, and, II 1t is all
that is claimed for 1t. the zebrula will
knock the spots off the army mule.