The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1903-10-18
OBEDIENCE in CHILDREN
1T SHOULD BE SECURED BOTH FOR
PRESENT AND FUTURE GOOD.
Methods Discussed by Prof. w. j.
Shearer. Who Speaks from Long
Experience i'm Schools.

home and in school. depend upon promnt
obedience As he grows to manhood he will
learn that he cannot live peacefully, unless
ne Is willing TO yield obedience not only
10 the authority in the family. but 10 that
IN the school and community as well One
OF the greatest OF all parental responsible
ues' then, Is that of fixing in every child
the habit OF unquestioning obedience TO
proper authority
Inc time may come in the life of every
chlid when, not only the happiness. but even
the lie or the child, may depend upon i'm
piicit obedience. Nearly every one can re-
call Instances when such has been the case.
Few there are who do not know of many
cases where child would have been saved
much pain had he learned to obey.
Many mothers. aud not few fathers en-
oeavor to manage their children by aid OF
tricks, and by other means which will en-
able them to avoid direct conflicts with
their children. In this way they hope to
secure compliance with their wishes. with
out unpleasantness
IL they have decided to go out and leave
one or more OF the children at home they
viii sometimes send 10 a different room
those to be left behind. Sometimes they
will tell deliberate untruths as to where
pretend to be going one place and fully in
tend to so to another The parents who
make use of such methods should not ex-
pect TO be held in respect by their children.
Not only will child soon learn TO look
with positive distrust upon everything the
parent says or does. but the disappointment
viii be so much increased that it will
scarcely ever be forgotten.
Worse than all. the children will be
trained in habits OF deceit and falsehood;
so that frreparable injury will be done
Parents who have used such means in the
MANAGEMENT OF their children will acknowl-
edge. that rot only did the children soon
discover the deceit. but also. that in a
short time they became more successful
than their parents in reaching desired ends
by means OF articles. if not by positive
falsehoods.
MANAGEMENT BY REASON
Other parents regularly rely upon man.
aging their children by giving reasons for
their action. Before these parents have
gone far they discover that they have lit
tie time for anything else. The children
will soon insist upon having explanations
at every point. Very soon the parents dis
cover that such method of management is
as inpracticable as the method by artifice
The probability is. that. becoming thor
oughly Disguised with themselves and this
method. they will suddenly change 10 some
more strenuous plan. There are times
when reasons may and should be given; but
without doubt, it is a great mistake fol
parents to give children grounds for ex.
pecting reasons. whenever they see fit tc
insist upon them.
As before stated others will object be-
Sh 10 he
reason Such are unrnindful OF the fac
that judgment is dependent upon othel
faculties. and is, therefore. the last 70 de
veIop. 1t is generally acknowledged that {
child ten years old may have strength
enough 10 earn a living, but the law doe'
not consider his reason sufficiently de
veIoped TO trust him TO himself until he Il
twsnty-one years old. Not only is it a dut!
OF a parent to support a child until he cal
support himself. but ii is equally bindin,
upon the parent 10 give child the bench
of the parents mature Judgment. To ex
pect a young child to provide nourishmen
for himself is just reasonable as t
think that he should furnish reason for hi
own guidance and direction.
The question which naturally arises in tn
mind of every thoughtful parent is, "Whe
shall I give reasons?" This is not cas-
question TO answe-.
AS before stated. there are times VINE
reasons should be given. There are othe
times when reasons should not be given.
IS very doubtful IL a reason should be give
20 q Young child when the question c
obedience is pending If offered as an IN
ducement 10 procure obedience. After IN
child has done as requested. is good tim
IN call the child and explain why somethin
was insisted upon. If done in the prope
shirt Il will make matters much more sal
tsfactory in the future. Again. it ma
sometimes be found best TO give reasons
an older child Of strong will for the purpos
Of helping the child TO come TO corre'
decision concerning something which ha
bsen left TO the child to decide No youn
child should ever feel that he has rigf
tn demand a reason Of parent
MANAGEMENT BY HARSHNESS.
Most NJ us know that the parent WI
strivea TO manage child by tricks,
simply by reason, Will soon hnd tines
methods altogether unsatisfactory Unkin'
n.ss scolding harshness. threats, lnJudi
tous punishments and other ill-consioere
methods will soon take the place OF govern
-, nv artifice and reason. That the'
aforementioned methods are used by man
N -,,., admit. That they are not prope
none will deny
THOSE who have endeavored to manat
.,e,r children by any OF the metho'
-o.nt,oned. will need no argument 10 co
,.tncs them that they have made mistak
uannv the parent who, before 1t Is TOO lat
r..,,zss the fact that the only parent
-ov.rnment which is worthy OF the nam
:. that founded. upon absolute. unques'lon :
.utbority. In the training OF chioIen
erst dairy of the parent Is the eS'ap"'
r,snt of authority over them very ear
Zach child should discover tne aoeo.u
..csssitv Of obeying the wish OF the pare
very early the habit of complying WIN
,srept.s demands should be firmly hxea
some will object because they wish 10 ~
nothing but gentle means win ,nsn rs
ayen. Their intentions are good. Ihe s.e
.rort of all parents should Dc ~ na
.hsir children by such measures. z,,
arspts will soon find that IL Is ih'pos-,
=. manage children by gentle means u".s
~ first secure absolute authof's
80 children Let this be secuieo' ~, .
.sara need be no trouble thereai'e,
DAfr