davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15

two, twinty, Broad he says.
''What else has Congress done, says
Sye7 Welt the House " Riprisinta-
tlves has passed bill irritatinn' tn
arid plains ", tn west, an . bill TO
rclleve TIL FIiplnos " TIL necessity
Nv nskln' frSrelief. 1t has passed tn
chewif,. tobacco, TIL flask, tn time "
4 day, the buck all tn lie direct. It
has sung 'ol1ang syne, an It's gone
i home. That's d good record 81 tn
1Iotsc. II ls5
!. "Th' shit wifi, Its thadditiors grim
With age Is still goin' on, Hiniilssy.
Me frlnd Tiddy Roshcnfel. wrote thin him /
D. lctther sayin' that they had done
we'll. They were a credit to tn coun-jSs
sthry an he Was as proudly thin, as
lie cud be cohsfdhcrln' tn difference In
their age. He wud like to pat thin
on TIL head but he cud on'y pull their
whiskers. 'sinitors, says no. no SHIT
since comeaiv age has excelled We. 1
If,annywan " 20 want rlcommit,das'-.
ton as sinitors sonewhores else, will
write 1t frye. have found 70
faithful, accomydatin,' obligin' In
dusthrees, honest yes indeed. have
niverf known{ye to fall In politenoss in
shown me TIL dure. Ye have we'll
fulfilled tn best Traditions " yeer
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15

liver id vaiorem, no says. my coun-l
8thry calls me an 1 lay aside ivry cor-
sldheratlon an irish to tn bank he
says. 'Th' still small voice ~ jooty
as II ticks on tn Figures on TIL tape Is
lvcr in mo cur, he says. 4 nm here
to belt tn tirusts, he says, an here
lam. / move ye, sir, that we substi-5
ohoot r. tn bill entitled a Bill Ito
NDurdhor Thrusts this, here small but
fragrant law entitled "A Bill to Give.
y Thin Hearty Hug. y Undher tn Z
terms " this Bill, TIT viii DO illagal
f'r a thrust to charge anrywnn frs
Its produck more thin 1t can get, to
pay back money to annywnn, to d.
vide It's profits with TIL poor, torburn
down Its btiildn's onlcss insured, to
advance wages, to build churches an
orphan asylums, OF to create a fund
fr tn missionaries In Chiny. II caught
In amy " these neefaryous inther-
priscs amy officer " d thrust will be
lible to a fine " four nillyon dollars
or imprisonnnint IN loonytioE asylum
or both. AS I said, offer this bill
with sad an achin' heart he says,
But I have done me jooty an with
that MUS be contlnt. F'rgive TIL
ears " a Spartan tFather-in-law, AM
boy, Gull up New York an get twlnty-f
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15
Universities IN THE LAW
What's Law In One State May be the
g5l Reverse in Another. Al

81 Tbs Times Dispatch, had o notice last
week OF a remarkable law case original
ins in the West An enthusiastic church
man was 30 vociferous In his responses
Of amen that he Interrupted the service,
and upon being reconstructed with by his
fellow members declined to moderate his
response. and they having gotten q re-
strainins order from a Judge, an injunc'-
/ ton was entered and the defendant l1tl7Al ap-
pealed to the higher courts.
A case very similar to this was tried
In North Carolina some years since. In
this case the defendant would lengthen
out the lines OF the hymns after the
congregation had closed SO far as 70
produce leytty ami destroy solemnlty;
Upon being admonishcd he also CLAIMED
1t his priyilegesto sing and refused TO SOP
singing. He was indicted under statute
for disturbing a religious congregation,
and under the charge Of the judge was
convicted. He appealed to the supreme
Court and that reversed the lower court,
holding that there can be no crime with
out tho intent, and that was wanting.
This case will probably be quoted IN the
argument OF the Western case.
I'm the question Of divorce the North
tCarOIlHa 6upISH!o S>ouA i''o~ - Is,
where q couple desiring to obtain a d.
yorce, but cannot do so in this state,
leaves the state and obtains 1t IN an
other. State, and then returns to TINS
state. tho divorce is not good and II
either one marrles again he or she is
guilty OF bigamy. And the court put the
decision on the ground that leaving the
state to obtain the divorce was an at
tempted evasion Of the laws Of the State.
The Supreme Court Of MASSACHUSETTS
has held III case identically the same
that the divorce was good. putting the
decision on the ground Of comfy towards
the laws Of other States. 1t Is for this
reason that q national divorce law has
been urged, in order that the law may
be uniform in all the States.
Some years ago remarkable case was
tried In this State, in which q wife was
Instrumental In securing the death OF
her husband and was imprisoned In the
fpenitentipry. While there she made a
petitiolysfor dover in the estate OF her
husband, which was resisted by the heirs
at law, and the case going to the Su-
prkme Court, 1t decided she was entitled
to dover. It held that the murder of the
husband not being a forfeiture OF dover
under tho common law and there being
no statute that embraced the case, she
was entitled to dover. Afterwards the
same case arose In Massachusetts and
the North Carolina case was cited to the
court in support Of the Widows conten-
ton for DOVER but the Massachusetts
courts would not follow the precedent OF
the North Carolina case, and denied the
petition for dover. 1t held that murder
being so abhorrent to every principle OF
nature and justice, the widow should not
profit by her own wrong.-Entield, ~. q.
] Ledger. &
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15

fon'rabie body, but We haven't done
amy wurruk, 80 rnus call ye IN
extra sessyot an ask to get busy Il
ye don't want to be an everlastin' dis.
4 grace to tn. country, he says.
"An' thcro ye ar.re. WHAT'S TIL
throuble. says ye7 yhey ain't nhny
throubie.N It's q question " sinitoryal
courtesy. What's that7 we'll, 1Iin-
Missy, ye see, there ait1't amy rules
In tn Shit tvrybody gets UP whir
he wants to ali hollefs about amy
thing that comes Into his head. Whin
Dorgan was In wash nton, he whit TO
i hear tn debate on til naval bill an
sinitor was r.rcadln TIL Life ~ Ma
1 polyon to another smltor who was
asleep. sinitoryai courtesy rules II
body. II We let me talk, III iot -
sleep. III. presidin oficer can : conn., "
down With his hammer an bld wan - !. ~
them via rable mon, grim With tn !.
lions, Is chase himself firm IN tlurte. re-
In such d case It wud DO parlym111in''tn :. =
RI tn. grim sinitor to heavo m i rs'
we'll at tn presidln' officer. Undfhler
sinitoryal courtesy It is proper an an
ayen Arabic to call fellow s 'ti
4 'liar.. It is TIL htth " courtesy to
ruah over an push his cigar down
his throat, to tako him DO tn h 1alF
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15

3 L. u
Y cent Segars and reie1ed his Mind OF
all Business Cares. % y 4. ss
He had nothing to worry him ex--5s
cept3 Affairs OF state. ss5,.
When he tackled q large Interna-3
4 tional Problem he could do so with q
j keen active Brain that had not been,
tagged out by any cheap Exertton,:
such as trying to locate the Winters
Supply Of Coal.
Mr.. Quinsy had tho solemn Phlz
+ of a professional Pall-Bearer and much,
Il meditation had corrugated tho Front
h Of the Done. Those who merely
4 caught one FLASH OF him and never
looked up his Record and checked on
his Pedigree thought he was about due
z To break into the Senate. TO tell the
cold and icy Truth, Nrordecat could
not have been elected Constable, but
Just the same he knew all about John
Hays next Move and sometimes he
fretfed good deal for Fear that
& John would make a Miscue and per-
nit himself to be Hornswaggled by
them foreign Diplomats.
Mr.. Quinsy could sit on a Kit OF
AIackeral with Bunch Of Keys. d
Barlow Knife Plug Of good eating
I Tobacco and about IS cents in Cur
rency secretea In his Jeans End he.
could tell the Treasury Department
Just how to manage the coSt 100000,
n COO Issue of Bonds
One thing that worried Mr.. Qulnsy
q lot was the possibility that Teddy
would make ,sarne serious Mistake.
He felt ore or less responsible for
TEDDY inasmuch as he had formally
nominated him in front OF Pikins
Hardware Store as far back as 1852
II he could have been at Teddys FL
bow all the time to whisper Advice
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15

ters and French masters engaged at their
husbands courts.
A man In love Is always interesting,
What a pity 1t IL that husbands cannot
always be In love!
There would be more happy marriages
IL men were deaf and women blind, and
even still II women We're all dumb.
The most that a man can do Is to avoid
temptations,
Men who always praise women do not
know them we'll; men who always speak
III Of them do not know them at all.
What particularly flatters tho vanity
0t women is 10 know that some men love
them and dare not tell them so. How
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15
~
BY MAX O'RELL

lady; but woman who does not know
how to set old ought to be gently chloro..
formed into the next world.
The old man who Is in love Is fairly
rIdiculously, but not SO much as the one
who thinks he can stu inspire the great
passion, Yet, compared to the old woman
who sntertans the same IDEAS. no Is
quite a sensible person, -s5
when two women, on meeting, kiss and
Darling each ether, 1t only proves that
they had met onca ALREADY.
Women often see without looking, men
otter, look without seeing.
a woman's Intention Is safer guide
than her eyes,
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15
Twilight / thoughts.

stiiiFl Il n
When twilight cohesive sit and think,
And, link by link,
Go DER the chain Of pleasures past;
Which flew SO fast
That one embracing glimpse at last.
Was all we saved fof them, except
What memory kept
III.
And Memory, now, around US throws,
or joys and woes,
A misty veil Of many strands; IN
And with soft hands
SO gently smoothes the roughened hands
That sorrows Joined with pleasures there
Seem even fair.
III
And as In twilight thus we think
Tho mis-shaped link
That last we forged comes into view
Wo find It's hue
Made up Of lights and shadows, too,
Then Memory draws away the light
And leaves the night.
ELIZABETH &BURWELL JONES.
Stanton, Va iis s,
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15
RAMBLES IN WOlNANLAND

OF selrlshness, It is for his own sake.
still more than for hers, that she should
be faithful to him. a
Tho man who honestly promises a wo-
man to love her eternally, and tho wo-
man who believes him, are both dupes.
the man of his heart. the woman OF her
vanity. Love is like any other disease,
you can never know how long you Will
be affected by It. The most unexpected
circumstances may cure It, like the most
unexpected one may revive It.
Two excellent kinds of wine mixed to-
gether may make very bad drink, An
excellent man and very good woman
married together may make an abomlna-
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15

The combatants were surprised, but
merely bowed. i. "a IA f, a " s,s55
Another dash, ana 1 sazed on thu
faintcst face \ ever sAw--a womans OF
an angels. could not dstsrmlne which.
Gentlemen, She cried, failing on th<
rain soaked sod ana claspins her hands
what means this duel, this opon grava
this unburied conn. this # Il q
3" Lady said Weatner. there Il but
ono sun to coax the bud and blossom ID
the spring time, but ono moon whose
beams caress the night.flower into opens 4
Ing wido It's petalsl Here are my antaso.
mist and myself, and you still bear yous
maidon name. Arc you answered T
(. Murder must not be done She plead1
ed. s5 33gFs Ky
mot voluntarily. but unavoidlbly.'l
Wcstoyer replied 3ss,. III ~.
Can you not interfere Z she pleaded
turning to me. l. Il &
Her voice thrilled mp. and strangely
my falterlng tongue Wagged fast and
sure. i8sf 8
Madam / replied. from tho context
Of Mr.. wcstover's statement conclude
that Il you woro welded to some third
party their quarrel would be at an end.
4 respectfully tender my services. q 5.3
".Westoyer sworc audibly. and look
OF: rage came into the unknown's eyes.
Az II By the MAG OF hcr coming tho
storm ceased and tho sky cleared. IA ray
OF moonlight broke through the clouds i
and illun,ined tile copse. The girl arose
to her feet. HI 5S% N ssg3 S$ sy5
could not'thrust myself on3a strang-
err she began slowly. 3s
"It is a choice bet tween two evils.
said: either granddaughter or a union
with such man as I. However; I
promise you comfort safety and .reyer- {
ence Should you deny me the honor OF
bestowing my name upon you. there may
81 no end to this dark nights work. and
Wishing to touch q, woman's weakness =
s'ths lame Of scandal easily fires the
land , N. 4 n s.g ~;
II looked at the erstwhlle duellsts, and
caGH in turn bowed a stiff compliance to
my suggestion. There Is O nearby par
sonage, 4 added, and II the lady Is con-
sentlng unto this method OF avoiding i'm.
pending trouble we will repair thlthcr.
Westoyer's brow darkened.
Here ID a grave awaiting Its coffin,
aud here coffin awaiting It's cadover,
Bury your enmityl' the girl ex-
claimed, for I shall so With yonder gen
tleman, stranger though no be-
.'Westovor raised tho comm ia and
dropped his sword therein. the unknown
did the same. and the blades. touching,
rang. w t5 KS
They have crossed for their last time
bowling to the girl. With q splash the
coffin was dropped in the grave, and BY
plying the shovel rapidly a mound soon I
appeared where tho pit had been. Just
outside tho corpse the lady stopped to
kiss tho horse she had ridden to death.
ana then taking my arm we hastened
to arouse the sleeping man Of GOD, Who.&
through mingled fear, and 4 WONDER 't'ltlltel, I
scarcely managed TO unto us.
1--WE returned to this room, ana my
newly-mado bride filled two goblets.
Kissed them and handed them to her
j, itherto sutors, Together they drank our
health and prosperity and Quilted the
NV great-grandfatlier drained another
glass. In a few minutes his snowy beard
Covered his bosom that heaved IN quiet
slumber.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15
I BY OTIS N. CLARKE II. Z Y i1E'.

the vineyards Of France, mind YOU, IONS
before saw the light O. day.
.one Of the men. who bore 9 lo lon
box under his arm advanced and raised Used
his Int. Tho scar on tho check tho
glitter in his eyes. told me that It was i''
my d former schoolmate. James Vest
over
"5.No greetings Of introductions, he
remarked In. : harsh voice. We are are
warm enough without your vino. Hand.
ling the pick ana the spade ID exercise
il-suited to gentlemen. n
xxx ' Il understand you not replied, no.
tlcins tbs bssds Of psrspiratlon on his
brow. y ~ 3ast t,-
"..1 have not tho honor OF calling you
4 friend, he went on, not hecding my
remark. but once you befriended me.
DO burden kindness ana ovcrtax pa
tience In asking q favor TO- nsht7 MY
acdu aintance and I have some matters
10 mend a third party is desired as .
witness to fair play, and his assistance
may be needed in the disposal OF the
earthly tenement Of one.
tan affair Of honor?' I questioned.
He bowed affirmative reply and then
opened the long box. Several highly
polished swords reflected the light OF
the candles. II
THE sword has no mouth he NUT
tered in This even. metallic voice. but
1t drinks deep Of rich, red wine-wine
from the heart OF man and not from
the grapes OF Burgundy!
"'They are all OF equal length and
good temper he continued. picking up
q blade at random, but 1t is better to
select ono with the aid OF a light, as
q man complains not Of a sword Of his
own choosing. The unknown also
chose weapon.
We fight by the llghtnlng's flash.
| In tho copse at tho rear OF the churoh-
! yard Ii the selected situation. Despite
the storm and this unusual affair, will
you accompany us
For answer, put on my coat and
picked up the box Again my uncle
drained his glass. !: Il
tinued, rubbing his palms together. land
obtain an idea Of that awful night The
lightning easily showed us the way. At
last we had traYersed the tombstone-
dotted graveyard and entered the dense
| thicket In the rear. In It's midst was q
small plot Of cleared ground.
"a long continued flash revealed q
newly-digged grave, at one end OF which
was mound OF rain. beaten earth, ana
at the other a grewsome coffin. 80
You will remain where you are. OBJ
served Westover'. addressing mo-. We
Will stand on the opposite side os the pit.
At the next flash we engage. Remember,
= silent tongue, or else--dead men tell
no tales, Ills commanding tones and
concluding remark mnddened me. Grow.
ing reckless, ! cried: II you question my
honor-seizing a sword-'we Will settle
1t here and now, }-1sS
"'Later on shall accommodate you,
he replied bowling. #t5s L
"a fash-thelr swords crossed and
rang, Tho glitter In their eyes outshone
the glitter OF Damascan steel. knew
that Westover was not accustomed to such
affairs. and from the defense OF his silent
opponent, inferred that he, too, was no
stranger to sword play. n
Suddenly n noise was audible In the
shrubbery. the bushes parted and a
dark-robed figure sprang between the
duelists. Not knowing what manner Of
a being the Intruder was, shrank back,
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15
By5GEORGE8A DE.

7 &
there would have been no Chance for
the Administration to get balled up
But the Trouble was that Mr.. Quinsy
was out at Peewee junction and Ted
dy was up ct Washington and they
could not get together to frame up o
Policy.
Mr.. Quinsy was man Of ReEulal
Habits and very Methodical He had
so much to dossvsry Day that he had
10 work on q close Schedule.
In the Morning. after his wife had
4 arisen and started the Fire ana pua
on the Griddle, Mr.. Mordecai r. Quinsy
would arise ana take o few Observa.
tons Of the Weather He was . very
able and one Of his ia
yorite Stunts was to get UP in the
Morning and do a little ForecastinE
for the benefit OF his Wife.and Daugh-
4 ter. II ,fj Il GIL N s II II IL 3 ee
After Breakfast he put on his Over
coat and wra pped himself up In
Comforter SO as mott catch Cold and
4 lose the Use of his Voice. If Mordecal
i. Quinsy had lost the use of his voice
this Country would have been IN q
. Bad Way. sif 81 s Il
& MIR. Qulnsy knew q Druggist who
took a Daily Paper and so, the first
4 thing every Morning, he went to the
Drug Store to find out what Foul
Break had been made by Congress.
After reading the Paper, he sat by
the Stove and laid out some Work
i for the Ways and Means Committee.
X 2 After which he went down to the
i Station to see Number Six go through.
A After which he went up to the POST
Office to wait until the Mail had been
distributed. One day In 1889 Mordecal
received a Seed Catalogue, and after
that he was encouraged. While watt
4. Ing for his Mail, Mr.. Clumsy said
n few plain Words about the Kaiser and
stood up for the Monroe Doctrine.
About II o clock every day Mr. Quin-
3 sy acted as referee In Pool Game
4 and then went over to the Barber
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15

BILE match. i'sT r. -,.f-
When you constantly hear the talent
or tho wit Of a woman praised, you may
take it~for granted that she is not beau
tItul. II she wero, you would hear her
beauty praised first Of all,
It Is slow poison that kills love most
surely. Love will survive even iRadelity
rather than boredom or safety,
Men study women and form opinions.
generally wrong ones. Women look at
men, guess their character, and seldom
make mistakes.
Jealousy discreet and delicate is a proof
OF modesty. which should be appreciated
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15

by the very woman who should resent !
violent Jealousy. II 55a
All the efforts that an old woman makes
to hide her ago only help to 4! advertise y
louder. #
Women's prejudlces are Judgments
against which there Is no appeal,
Of a man and "a woman, II 10 the one
VINO Is loved. but who does not love, tina 3
Is the unhappier Of the two, @
OF all the heaYy.welghts In tho world
the heaviest Is tho woman whom you
have ceased to love, /, 4
Nothing is more delightful than the
company OF an amiable and cheerful OLD
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15

ever, they do not always insist on those
men remaining silent forever.
The saddest spectacle that the world
can offer is that OF q sweet. sensible. In.
telligent woman married to q conqeted,
tyrannlcal fool. Eli
The mirror Is the only friend who Is
allowed to know the secrets OF a woman's
imperfectons.
When a woman Is deeply In love the
capacity of her heart for charity Is with
ont limit. If all wome. We're In love
there would be no poverty on the race
of the earth -.
The fidelity of a man to the woman he
loves Is not duty, but almost an act
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15

once out of ten times, The other nine
occasions talk OF other things Talk OF
pleasant subjects, which vii! interest your
listener. Control your face and your
voice as well as your words.
Keep the whine OUT OF your voice, Tho
droop cut OF your mouth. am not adj
dressing these words TO those IN sudden
great sorrow II you have just seen
the door Of the tomb close on some ono
that you worshipped, or been stricken
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15

you Will neYer see the light OF hope.
health and success shining upon you,
Think these thoughts pack-and look
for the sun, and you will see IT,
Each time I write words OF this kind
I receiys scores Of letters Of protest from
people who feel would deprive them
OF their Chief pleasure, that OF talking
OF their misfortunes. They say; |t IS
easy for you to. give adYice-but walt
until you try the experience Of mlsfoyr5
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15
CROSS BUILDERS.

with some awful calamity. you cannot
be expected to smile and talk of cheer
full things until time accustoms you to
the thought Of your trouble and softeRs
The pain, as tine always does.
But the world Is full of worries, cares.
griefs anxieties and fears. for all of
us, if We choose to dwell upon them.
and no life Is EXEMPT from these things;
and II We all talk continually about the
troubles which come to yex Us We cree
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15
by ELLA WHEELER WILCOX


can neryo tho hand, and tho Nbraln TO
do what 40 merely mortal effort ever
achieved, Il
i know tint continued discussion
OF i'll health, poyert ana misfortune is
crime and q sure way to prevent and
retasd success for yourself Or others, And
s. knNw that youltan change your en-
vironInsnt by tho Divine Power in your
self, IL son develop ".
K All things are possible 70 God, our
skin-aHd each soul Is that.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15

heads by means OF short ones, and some-
times 1t happens that their heads are fix
ed TO their shoulders by the most DELI
cate of contrivances. Yes, it is Won
derful.
Fiction is full of kings and prIncesses
marrying shepherdesses and beggarmaids;
but. in reality, 1t Is only the Grand-pucal
House Of Tuscany which, for nearly three
hundred years, has exhibited royal Prln-
cesses running away with dancing maa-
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15

ate a current OF inharmony, which Will
make a complete discord of l'fe'
II you hold a piece of black paper close
before your eyes you shut out all the
light of day.
If you put that piece Of paper behind
you. even though you5stlla hold u, you
'see tho sun!
Just so If you keep your sworry OF pow
erty. sickness and failure before Your
eyes. by thinking and taking OF u,
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15

tune yourself"
Nevertheless, ! must continue q to re-
peat the philosophy which know 70 be
as true as Gods law OF Love, I know
that a persistent hope and courage. a.
persistent belief In the coming of bet
talk about sickness. failure or despair,
Will bring success three fold sooner than
the same effort without such thoughts
Il know. that the power q mind y When
1T comes from the Divine mind behind
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1903-03-15

F--eo MATTER what your situation
I'M Iin life, you can find pleasant
things 70 think, talk and write
E9HN letters about,
~ ~ Unless you can do this be
dumb. and drop all correspondence No
\ one wants to hear recital or your
woes. III.
YOU may speak Of your sorrow, triahsor,
3 need once. to friend. under certain
Il conditions which compel you TO ASK adj
VICE, sympathy, or air; but let .it be only