Ellsworth American., 1903-06-03
N A CONVENIENT VEHICLE

AOJpany.1
The young doctor took the sick mans
temperature, scanned his tongue, felt
his pulse and lifted the eyelids to scru-
tinize the optics. After a few seconds
of profound meditation-or was it hesi-
tation?-he prescribed for his patient in
blindly scrawled Latin, adding in Eng
lish the direction, ''To be taken twice
day in any convenient vehicle"
BE there any show fer me to git
well. doctor?" quavered the sick man.
"Sure there is, Mr. Simmons. You'll
be all right now in no time. These pills
will set you up at once"
Then the sapient young disciple of
Esculapius drew on his gloves and
gave a reassuring grasp to Ben Sim
mons oHstretched hand. With an en-.
couraging smile all round upon the
staring little Simmonses and the pallid
wife, over whose face a gleam of hope
seemed to flicker, he departed, tearing
down the road at breakneck speed,
as if bound for dying patient.
/ Hanged If know what ails the old
chap" he mused as he galloped along.
How is a doctor going to prescribe
for an idiot who can't give clearer ac-
count of his feelings than "a dull, heavy
| misery in his bonesr"
| But Ben Simmons mended from the
hour that Dr. Bledsoe took charge of
his case. Strength and courage and
health seemed rolled up in those won
derful pills, the fame of which spread
through the backwoods Missouri town.
Z The doctors visits soon ceased at the
Simmons cabin, for Bob Simmons after
long months of diseased liver, indis-
criminate patent medicine taking and
+! confinement within the four walls Of
bedroom into which the breezes of
heaven were never permitted to enter
| had come forth a well man. To the
+, doctor, be it confessed, Bob's conva-
! lescence was as great wonder as to
the community at large, though of this
! he kept silence.
| One evening DIR. Bledsoe was waiting
for his mail at the little postoffice seat
/ ed in an inconspicuous place behind
newspaper which he had spread out
/ before him. Suddenly his attention
was reused by hearing his own name
! spoken. The tone he recognized as the
| drawing one of Mrs. Ben Simmons.
"Yes; Ben were in a powerful bad
way when DR.. Bledsoe TUX hold of
| His liver were all out O whack, an he
were that thin it looked like it wouldn't
| be long fore his hided be on the fence"
| "You don't say" calculated her inter-
locutor.
His narvous system were all gone,
an his blood were turned to water an
his mind Were 'fected, an he were
| threatened with the tarrified fever,
an -
what did the doctor dew fer him
| Dew telln'
| "Jes' some little teenty pills. Mr..
Slivens, not big as pea. But the way
| they he'd to be TUX was the quarest.
| He writ it out to be taken in any con-
venient vehicle We didn't hev no
| idee of the meanin' of that word, so we
| borr'ed the schoolmarsters dictionary,
! an, sir, we foun' out at vehicle meant
| coach, wagon, cart, carriage. Well,
| sir, eff we didn't jeS' bun'le up Bob an
| take him out twice a day in the ole
| buggy out inter the country to give
| him them pills. In less'n a week he
were mendin' fine, an in less'n a
month he We're plum we'll"
"Waal. | dew declare! It's wOnner-
| fulr' interpolated Mr.. Slivens.
"Oh, l tell you. DR.. Bledsoe's stem
winder, he is, fer doctor, Mr. Slivens.
Them pills has cured half the people
in Simmons Landin. Eff folks didn't
| hev no buggy, they'd wheel their sick
uns out in wheelbarrers to take the
pills, an sures you're bawn they
didn't none of 'em die. You see, the
| schoolmarster said the wheelbarrer
were IA vehicle though in course it
warn't ekal to a up an down buggy"
Il reckin the doctors fortin are
made in Simmons Landin' count of
luGIu lJllIS. dSStNCtdlSu MI DIV
AS DIR. Bledsoe rode home that even
ing he indulged in loud outlaws inter-
spersed with frequent CALCULATIONS of
'I'll be dogged!' and emphasized with
slaps on his horses neck.
Now the extensive practice which he
had achieved in the three months time
he had been in Simmons Landing was
ayDIaiDad oS was ROb simmons mi
raculous cuI<.
A girl down east received a letter in
which her lover announced his unparal-
leled success in his new field of prac-
tice owing to his fortunate cure of his
first patient. though he did not state by
what convenient vehicle" it was done.
'It is said that doctor doesn't make
his bread until he has lost his teeth
he wrote, but, darling, am making
? fua LIVING already at my profpSSiOO