The semi-weekly messenger. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1897-1908, 1903-03-10

what ARE we gOin' to DO aDoH- III
~soons?' asked Mr.. Dooley.
What ought we to do about th7mE'
asked Mr.. Hennessy.
We've got to do somethln' SAID
MT. DoOley. Something's got to be
spae. Whin 1 was a young mar L
ray-ninber hearin' people talk iv boos-
In th. naygur up firm his lowIy
plaee as an unforchnit slave an hu-
norist an maxim him as good as
ANYBODY an betther hin a German
De giyin' him a vote. 1 didn't believe
believe anything but Stephen A.
Douglas. But they used to say it jus
IN same an If ye didn it's say it, too. it
was down to Camp Douglas with ye
be IL back iy tn neck as a prisner iV
gar. Tn dimmycrats knew that a
nayEUr with a vote be a
NiIIuTn Shakespeare. 1t Wuddent take
amy iv tn dusk out iv his cheeks to
sind him down TO tn liv'ry stable an
lave him stick an impeeryal ballot that
he cudden't r-read into a box with a
false bottom. Can tn camel change
his hump? as Hogan wud say. A lay
CUR with q vote is q naygur with a
vote, an that's all he Is. TIL d.mmy-
Gratis knew that forty years ago.
Histhry always VindiCates tn dlmmy-
Gratis but niVer in their life time. They
see tn thruth first but tn thrOub'c Is
that uawthin' is liver officially thrue
til g republican sees 1t.
TIL naygur amt amy betther off
thin ne was. Nobody is. But nearly
Evrybody ixpicted afther tn war that
his looks WI become golden at wanst
an that he wud soon get a Roman
nose. But here he is today loOkin' JUS
as he did forty year ago. He aiI't got
amy more money. he amt amy lighter
in complexion an 1 sometime doEbt
whether he's amy happyer thin he was
whin they was takin' his darlin' Nelly
Grey away firm him an ed niver see
her more till they met in tn Jim Crow
sictioE iV Hiven. Dow in tn merry
ChilavrOus Southland no 6asket picnic
Is complete onless a magyar is dap.n-
aIn' fr'n tn ~shrubbery. Up here in
this free North Nv ours where tn wur-
ruds Nv Windell Phillips is still soundin'
IN tn air we ont see amy naygurs
narryiR' into our ladlu' families. We
welcome him as our a.kel IN all ray
spicts but none iv our conservative
prize fighters will put on tn g.oves
with him.
$50 1 q something's got to be
done fr him but hat 1t is, 1 dinnaw.
Teddy Rosenfelt's idee Is to glad hand
him up to q higher plane. All we've
got to do to make him tn akel iv his
white brother Ks to give him a job an
have him up to tn White House fr
dinner Preparations is bein' made FIR
tn dinner to t. Royal Knights iv tn
Ordaar Nv Dry ntal ~Splendher iv Para
Eas whose p sidint is tn Hon'rable
E~greziOus G as iV Allybama. A wagon
kad iv pull IS an hams was delivered
yistcTdah 1t tn White House. TIL
dinu"r will be followed be d musical
at which tn prisidint an S:nitOr Han
Ma will sing q duet. Both statesmen
will blaciI up in honor iv tn comp'ny-
Th' prisidint has appintsd HOn'rable
Lucuflus Buffins tn well-known nay
CUR orathor to be marshal at PianOla,
Miss. Frinds " tn family ARE kind
" layquisted 10 omit flowers 'Imme-
lately Or rayceivin' his commission as
postmaster iy OZalOO. LOuisIyany. tn
HOn'rabIe Napolyn Bliggs, tn ely
brated naygur a~ggytater too tn night
NuToiH d III NOTIU. III Splle ~ III
I~ateness iv tn hOur a large number
~ Misther BliGgs' fellow citizens es-
corted him to tn thrafn. They Nud
not permit him 20 walk but INSISTED on
Garryin' him on a twO-be-four restin'
on their shoulders. Misther Bliggs ex-
picts to spend some time in tn North
when he will consult a prominent sur
geon an nave tn feathers extracted
"But tn throubIe with this here
plan is that tn higher ye boost tn
naygur be askin' him up to tn White
House. tn farther he ha to fall whin
he gets about two blocks south " tn
White House. Wan " our dusky fell
IOW citizens comes out firm a meal
with tn prisidint an cake walks to a
car. He is not pulled up with tn ray
option. Not at all. TIL av'rage chest
neasurmint " a colored gintleman
who has had three or four fish balls
with tn prisidint is rarely over wan
hundherd an eighty inches. So he
mOdeStly sthruts over to a car, takes a
seat, puts his feet in tn lap iv' tn
lady across firm him an says in a
d~iferenchial yell 10 Il Confederate colo
mel mex TO him, White pusson give
this here frind " tn prisidint a light
fri we're see-gar.' An Whin he comes
20 his leg is on fire.
ale frinds down South don't be-
heve in this way iv ilivatin' tn coon.
They have ways " their own. They
think 4 uaygur ought to be improved
EOWIy. TIL slower tn betther. l was
T-Teadin' a speech be ~ thin tn
other day. He was conservative on tn
question Like all southern men he
admitted that something was TO be
said on both sides. He did not boast
~ his siction iv tn country. 4 thrue
Southerner niver does. 1t wuld i'll be-
come him to suggest that tn South IS
anything more thin tn fairest spot
on Gawd's footstOol. inhabited be tn
braves men. IN lOveliest an mos
Sarchous women, tn most toothsOme
an encouragin' booze an tn fastest
ponies IN tn wUrruld. Let others tell
" I'll beauties " tn South. Ye Will
not dhraw tn tale firm tn lips " a
southern man. Aven IN his cups he
scorns TO give more hin three cheers
g minyit fr tn Cloryous state iv dis.