The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-11-22
On "a -
Thanksgiving.

66v-z ELL. Mrs. Pedagog." said the Idiot, with
AWB a broad and genial smile he dropped
HhH his newspaper and turned his attention
WH TO the commissary department, Il pre-
sumo that. with your usual forethOught you have al
ready laid your plans for Thursdays banquet.
I certainly have, Idiot" replied the good lady
addressed. And what is more, am going to profit
by last years experience. which taught me never
10 Judge a mans appetite by his lack Of prosperity
Of fbe 5eaT nreIious TO last Thanksgiying that
thought YOU would come TO the table with an i'm
L,,It ~ ,rben we we're fnisbed upstairs there
result luat "Heu we 80 s ~ t{-itct,,. 80
every atom or cranberry had disappeared into your
tbanIess threats. and as for the pumpkin pie Mary
said you must have eaten the plates for three
OF them disappeared and have never turned up since
II don't rernembery any such paucty of food
No . said the Iandlady. you naturally wouldn't
Tor. saying that you didn't what part of the
turkey YOU got YOU actually consumed four slices of
white meat two drumsticks two second joints ana
a wshbone together with such tit-bits as was sub
sequenUy able TO extract for your benefit from the
carcass"
''Weu, my dear madame can you blame me?' said
the Idiot Your cranberry sauce is so awtuly good
had to eat something else TO cover up my IN
roads into the seemingly perennial supply.
There's harm done" rejoned the landlady.
both the turkey and the sauce, not to mention the
pumpkin pie. were designed for the purpose 20 Whlch
you put them. I only object when r.y plates dis
Il plead not guilty to the plates" put in the Idiot.
''I haven't eaten bit OF crocksry FOR twenty-five
years judge from the china eye mat Mr, B 3
you this injury-or perhaps the Bibomaniac- ] have
known eX-bOOkOVerS whose passion Tor rare Plates
remained long after their libraries had passed into the
auction room"
''Tutt." said the Bbiomanac scornfully.
Otherwise" said the landlady, Il shall be ready
Tor -ou Thursday have had prosperous
rieriod OF this year. There isn't OF that
Is more than a month behind i'm his rent; every room
an the house has been occupied. summer and win
ter since January. and owing to the con-
etructon Of the subway through our street my rent
has reduced so per cent you see ] can afford
20 give you individual turkeys and separate pump
kin pie each ir I deem il necessary
by Jove. Mrs. Pedagog.' cried the Idiot enthusi-
rstcaly. you q very Carnegie of landladies-
large hearted. and believer in profit sharing If
-1y latest enterprise WAN street goes through /
think I shall make you general manager
Yes" said the Idiot. 81 working up the En-
rIre city Consolidated Boarding House corporation
we propose al the boarding houses in the
city and by putting them upon sounder economic
basis dollars sprout from hitherto barren soil
We shall have a landlady general to look after the
whole outfit; a bureau Of complaints where. when
things go wrong. protests be sent so that the
everlasting growing a the breakfast table By dis
satisfied boarders viii become thing OF the past;
md that bane of boarding house life, the man
man who. because he she occupies front par
Tor with folding bed in e. looks down upon the poor
soul who can afford only pigeon hole called "a hall
bedroom the fourth floor back, viii be eradicated