The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1903-06-04
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Blanks death2 Friend-No. Are you
sure he's dead2 Doctor-Posltlye.
treated him myself.-Chcago Daily
News.
Mamma-Why, Bobbiel Crying at
the table? What Is the matteri Bobby
quite sobby)-The's four kinds of cake,
an I'm only hungry enough to eat two.
brooklyn Life
Positive Testimony: You needn't tell
me-" ayerred Miss Batchgurl that
golf isn't good exercise 1t makes the
young men so strong In the arms that
that you can scarcely breathe. Chi
cago Tribune.
She-You certainly wouldn't marry a
girl for her money. would you? He
OF course not. Neither would hive
the heart TO let her become an old
maid merely because she had money
Chicago Daily News.
Mrs. Aufait-Now, Nora, be very
careful of this cut-glass punch-bowL
IL cost a mint of money Nora-In-
dade, mum! Wen. its rale tough. Sure
an | drapped 1t three lines already.
an niyer faxed 1.-THE.
Trouble In Store: Young Husband Ito
wlfe)-Didn't / telegraph you not TO
bring your mother with you? Young
Wife, know; that's what she wants
to see you about. She read the tele-
grami-St. Louis Mirror.
Entirely too particular: Terrence
with the hod)-Yer not workln', Din.
ME. Are yez out. of a job? Dennis
Sure. Oh fell off a nine-sthory bulldin'
Yesterday an OF got mad and quit.
Terrenee-Aw. 20 on Yer too slnsi-
tlye.-Judge.
Claribel-You told me you were
never going to write to young Hank.
inson again. Angle-He's written me
dozen letters | haven't answered.
but in his last one he left page out.
and | had TO write and ask him what
It was about. Chicago Tribune.
No cause for suicide: Miss Dream
ler-When you stood on the brink OF
Niagara, and looked Into the seething.
surging. unfathomable depths below.
TO jump inl Mr.. Touner-No hadn't
received by hotel bin then.-New York
Weekly.
Aids to discrimination: Doctor
James. did that lady In the waiting
room come In her own coach or a troll
ley car? Seryant-Trolley car. sirl
Doctor-Thanks! | couldn't tell from
her dress whether 10 prescribe three
months at Newport or sulphur and
molassesl-Puck.
Failure: II thought Spoonamore
was going to marry Miss Garlinghorn,
but | see she has let him get away"
Yes; her father didn't appear TO be
at all anxious for the match. aud her
mother was a little too anxious. She
lost him on account OF bad team
Chicago Tribune
Fallen on A colonel OF an infantry
regiment, while inspecting his COM
mand, happened TO be thrown from his
horse, and, as he lay sprawlng on the
ground. said to brother officer. who
ran TO his assistance: Il thought | had
improved In horsemanship. but find
have fallen off. "-Illustratcd Bits.
Trouble ahead: Weary WILHELM
gettin' a little nervous about desc here
dying maehlnesl Flooding Pete-Why
nervous? Weary Wiille-Well as soon
as dey gifts flying machines dey'll BIO
gttln aerial freight trains. and it
don't be no cinch gettin' chucked OF
an aerial freight train, lemme tell yer,
Puck.
Dlsproying an idiom. MA" re-
marked the small boy, Isn't 1t funny
that everybody calls little brother
bouncing babyT Why do you think
1t is funny, WllllamYs returned his
mother. Because when dropped
him or the porch Ibis morning he
didn't bounce bit. lie Just holered."
-Tit-Bits.
The Bride (weeplngl-oh, J-Jaek,
we've-we'ye got TO, j-just got to give
up b-boarding, and ego to h-house-k-
keeping-g. Hubby-why, loyey, what's
/ the matter? The Bride-AIrs. Worfits
has been telling me all afternoon about
the trouble she has with cooks. and |
didn't have anything to tell her.--Har-
per's Bazaar.
The hotel of 2003. Clerk Michael,
are you about through moving those
/ trunks? Porter-Yis. sor; In few
minutes. Clerk We'll. when you've
finished. stretch the life net over the
front pavement. Mrs. Hibawl has Just
telephoned from the top floor that her
husband has fallen out of the window.
Smart Set
Automobile proverbs: "To huto or
to be autoed. that Is the question"
IAN auto In the hand Is worth two in
4 he repair shop He who autoes and
rides away will live to auto another
day" run over others as they would
run over you and 1t first" TO
have raced and lost Is better than not
to have raced at all. a1iMaryvllle (Kan).
Tribune.
In Southern State the other day a
/ gentleman, who was waiting for his
train Mt n country, station, asked a
porter who was lying on one Of the
seats where the station master lived.
and the porter lazlly pointed 10 The
house with his foot The gentleman.
very much struck at the mans mzl-
ness, said: If you can show me a
lazier action than that. my good man.
I'll give you two-and-slx. pence" Tho