Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1903-07-18

The employees or tne engineer department
of the District government are deriving
considerable enjoyment from what they
consider a huge joke at the expense Of one
of the inspectors of that department. 1t
seems that the particular individual in
question was assigned to inspect the work
being done in connection with the construc-
ton of an electric railway. portion of
it's roadbed is laid near the grounds OF the
Government Hospital for the Insane. One
day during the lunch hour the inspector
strolled through a gateway and roamed
about the asylum grounds. All was calm
and peaceful until he attempted to leave.
when he was halted by guard at the
gate and notified that he could not pass
out.
There must be some mistake. declared
the surprised District employe. Il am an
inspector the railroad being built out
there"
Why of course replied the guard.
politely. I'VE mustn't doubt your word, for
we have any number of men In here VINO
think they own entire railroad systems
Not until the inspector had been escort
ed tn the office of the superintendent OF the
institution and search of the records
made the guard convinced that the
prisoner was cOmpos mentis.
::
Patrons of very nice little boarding
house in Washington have been hay
ing lot of fun lately over little cpl
soda of Love me. love my dog. said a
gentleman who exerts a hypnotic influence
over small grocers in and around the ma
tional capital and draws pay therefor from
a leading wholesale house here.
The destinies of this boarding house,
continued the commercial Svengali. ARE
presided over by a handsome young widow,
= slyy -tarr ri iafC
which evidently occupies a large share of
her affections That share of her affection
not given to the purp. according to the
other boarders. Is cornered by well-knOwn
salesman who boards at the place and ope-
rates around the city. In his efforts to win
half of the heart of the landlady, this
drummer. in manner utterly devoid Of
jealously, has automatically devoted a
great deal of his spare time to the sky
terrier. The other morning before break
fast he took the purp out for an early
morning stroll usual. but this morning
the dog had no collar or tag on. While the
drummer meanderng along the street
intent upon his reflections of a bachelor
the dog strayed away from his protector.
and when the salesman came out of his
trance 1t was to see the rubber-tired dog
catcher with the skye-terrier in his clutches
making for the animal wagon.
our friend started for the canine enemy
the man with the net the wagon had driven
away at good clip. For IA moment the
drummer was nonplussed. He didn't know
what to do. He thought of taking the next
train out of town. and again of walking Off
the Long bridge. Neither idea, however
seemed To appeal to him. so he went into a
place with swinging doors and after buoy
ing up his courage with a few draughts of
liquid rrfreShrnent he Strolled back TO the
boarding house alone
The first thing the landlady said she
met him at the door was. oh. where's my
little darling? The drummer knew she
didn't mean him. He remained silent and
waited for the fireworks. The horrible
truth flashed upon the lady. and she gave
the faithleSs man the frozen stare. He saw
il was all up with him, 50 he decided to de-
part from the usual methods in such cases
and tell the truth He broke the news to
the landlady as gently possible. and
when the worst was known she rolled her
eyes toward the ethereal blue. gave one
gasp and fell over in faint.
The salesman hadn't expected such a
proceeding. and he WAS taken with yearn-
ing desire to before he was discovered
He controlled the impulse. however. and
began To think of the fair victim of his
carclesSneSs He had heard one of the
dodgers called doctor. SO he chased up the
stairs three at a time. and pounded the
door of the doctors room. beSeeching him
to come down stairs at once and restore
the fainting woman. The man appealed to
informed the drummer that he was a de-
strover of Corns and bunions, and that
should he attempt to operate outside his
line he would be fired from the union He
advised the drummer to put q piece of ice
down the ladys back. and started to jump
into his clothes and come to the rescue.
our much perturbed friend didn't walt
to hear the advice. but slid down the banis-
ter To the lower floor and Selling a glass
of Ice water dashed it in the lady's face
She revived. but upon heholding the cause
of her sorrow again fell over limp. BY this
time the house was aroused and the board
ers helped bring the lady to again After
taking another lapse into forgetfuness she
feIt she had done her duty by the memory
OF the purp and remained conscious.
But the drummer's troubles had only
just begun When the story was told some
of the other women in the house looked "a
nm as though he were "A thief caught with
the goods. while the men-some with feel
inSS of jealousy and others approaching the
situation made little remarks which didn't
help his ease in the least One wanted to
Know how he could let the dog get so far
out of his sight and maliciouSly limited that
II" was perhaps flirting with one Of the de-
partment Stor" girls. Another suggested
that the next time he went in for his early
morning constitutional he should take the
purp along and give him drink and other
remarks in u similar strain We're made by
the huaricrS.
Our friend stood up like a man. how
ever. and took his medicine. He declared
he would go out and get the dog and have
him back befor. II O'Clock that morning
w hat VIII II cost To get him back
asked the laudlady.
" oh about 81 said the drummer and
l II go right out To the pound without eating
my breakfast and get him He began to
get hopeful.
The drummer draws Il good salary and