Omaha daily bee., 1903-02-10
Brrs on wAsHINeToN LIFE.
Minor scenes and Sketched
ON spot.

-
Minor Scenes and Incidents Sketched
ON the spot.
In spite OF the vast quantity OF a~nti-fat
remedies prescribed and marketed by the
medical profession there are Instances,
strange to say. among the doctors them
selves. In which these infallible remedies
utterly fail to produce the guaranteed re-
suits. One Of the victims Of unseemly
bulk, who tried in vain to melt some Of
his too solid flesh. has had his faith in
pills and potions sadly shaken, and his
grief Is the more poignant because his ex-
pausiVe front prevents his promotion in
the medical stan OF the navy. DR.. A. H.
simonton is acting assistant surgeon OF
the navy. has a remarkably fine record, and
under the rules is entitled TO promotion.
But DR.. Simonton is Of such massive frame
that he cannot get through the matches
Of a torpedo boat. He could not render
first aid to the injured or any other kind
Of aid unless the injured should be brought
on deck. where he would have room to
turn around. Actual measurements OF DR..
Simonton's girth and Of the hatchways
apertures show that the hatchways would
have to be reconstructed II he is detailed
for the torpedo boat service.
But tina isn't all. 1t is objected to DR..
| SlmOntOn IndI ne Is 80 DTOhu Oh pthm tuhl
he cannot navigate the narrow channel OF
a battieship's corridors and would be in
constant danger Of getting wedged in be-
tween the bulkheads. Further than that,
the stateroom of a battleship is limited
in size, and It is said that DR.. Simonton
would have to sleep on the cabin table,
because he couldn't get into the state
room berth.
Just before the close Of the year the
stock Of silver dollars held by the general
fund Of the treasury was down to less
than 800, 900, being the lowest that had
been reported for many years. At the rate
at which demands for dollars we're being
received for shipments to all parts Of the
country, It was thought that the stock
would be entirely exhausted, In which event
Secretary Shaw would have been compelled
to notify bankers and others that he had
no more silver dollars to distribute. Just
as the vaults were about to be swept clean
the tide turned the other way. Business
slackened. and. instead of going out, the
dollars began to come in.
There has been a steady gain for the past
three weeks, and today the silver dollars
in the general fund number nearly 5000, 900.
It is curious to note the tastes of the people
in different sections of the country in re-
gard to money. The big silver dollars are
very popular all through the south and
west and in the rural districts of certain
eastern states, but there is no demand for
them whatever in large cities east OF the
Ohio river. The people OF Pottstown, Pa.
evidently prefer the silver dollars to the
silver certificates, for the department re-
ceives regular orders for the shipment Of
large sum Of silver dollars to that town.
TTnola Gam hu tho uav navg the frnfght
on these shipments, and also insures safe
delivery, there being no charge to the
banker whatever. This is a scheme the
government has for encouraging the circu-
lation Of silver dollars. The only require
ment is that the money must be ordered
in lots Of not less than $500 worth.
The Civil Service commission recently re-
ceived from a concern which manufactures
glass eyes q request for an Endorsement of
It's wares on the ground that "a hazel,
crystal left eye worn by one of our patrons
was marked Observation-Disclosures excel
lent in a recent examination for the COM
mission"
All the details Of the matter were given,
the candidates name, the date on which
he took the examination and the percentage
be made. The commissioner found that
4 IA III IAC = aAAAN1 80 49,
records. The candidate was summoned be-
fore a medical expert at the commission
New York office and the report of that Off
GER received today confirms the c%ompany's
assertion.
The medical oficer says that the left eye
was of glass, but that II could hardly be
detected, as 1t rolled in unison with the
other, was Of the same color and looked for
all the world like a natural optic. The
physician was in some doubt himself. he
says, even after the usual tests until he
tapped the candidate on the pupil with the
butt end OF a penknife.
"Yes," tainted John Sharp Williams OF
Mississippi to uncle Joe" Cannon, 1--WE
, democrats will whip you all right in 1904
"Got a candidate?" asked "Uncle Joe,'
softly.
'We'n have one" Williams replied.
"You fellows remind me of the man who
was driving along a country road in I'LL
nois," said Uncle joe" "He asked q
farmer which was the road to Paw Paw.
y wal said the farmer, there's tive
} roads. II you take that one yender you'll
wisht you'd taken t'other, and II you take
tother you'll wisht you'd never Gomez
Representative GoIdfogle had som con-
3 stituents who came to see congress work In
1.-THE rotunda OF the capitol. He was show
ing them the pictures. .
Now this" said Goldfogle, "is a picture
= Of Washington giving up his commission.
2 "Giving up his commission, huh?" com
! mented one OF the party. HE must have
4 been a sucker. How much was his com.
mission"
; Representative Sibley Of Pennsylvania
4 who was elected to the Fifty-sixth con
J gress as a democrat and to the Fifty-sev.
D enth as a republican. was making a trus-
, speech.
a What side is sibley taking?" asked Rep.
E resentative Nevin Of Representative Kyle
! II don't know" said Kyle. .I only hearC
. him talk for fifteen minutes. He may have
9 shifted since then"