Middlebury register. (Middlebury, Vt.) 1886-1937, 1903-02-06
JOBSON'S NEW SUIT.

ly suggested Mrs. Jobson to Mr.. Jobson one
evening about two months ago, when he
seemed to be in an afiable humor, that this
year you ought to have an evening suit"
Now, Mrs. Jobson had been making this
same suggestion to Mr. Jobson every season
for something like ID years, and had al
ways been rebuffed. But the soul of the
married woman never despairs when she
imagines that she is pretty well acquainted |
with her man and is learning him better
all the time, and by such persistence had
Mrs. Jobson won many victories in other
directions. And SO she took the chance |
lon this evening suit suggestion once again. |
But 1t was again a failure. Mr.. Jobson |
drew himself up straight in his Morris chair,
glared at her much as if she had just thrown
a book at his head and missed it by half an
inch. and growled:
Madam I'm often tempted to wonder il
you possess the notion that | have no more
of a memory than a snake doctor. Are
you aware of that fact that you have been
making that same idiotic proposal to me
regularly ever since-snce the deuge, and
that just regularly | have told you that
never, so long as | have enough breath left
in my frame to snuff a Christmas candle
held at a distance OF half inch from my
nose, will l do such an imbecile trick as
to don one of those spike-tail affairs that
make man look like "a"
But" interposed Mrs. Jobson, sooth-
inglY, Il am sure that you would look so
nice in evening clothes, you are so-so-er-
portly, you know, and"
nat Will 90 about the porthness,
growled Mr.. Jobson. IF you want to come
right out and say that / am fat, fat, just
you go anead and DO 1t, instead OF trying
-
10 SUCK IN tnese nttle cat-daps. don I
"eigh DIS huch as ION Oh coai yet' al thao'
anu even ulu, II Wouldh I pe any dls-
grace; ana II you nave got the idea that
~ ) the Whoie uuty Oh man VIE 10
.nro" OniIes up 70 MN thaC ne ISL tairectlE
A'9 i0i' Wy =,
oni9 lneant' PuI Ill MIS- oopson, MOI
iin9lneS' VnaV thlih man VINO Is slght-
" Stout you hnoW' always lookS lluch pet
tei ~ evening" ololhes man INN IN man anu
pesiuee' YOU Nio"' an VI your lrlenus nave
en'"e sul'9' %nu "i.n 'neI ~ ~ 'He
'nea'e, VI any i,eie "' niei 'nes
IL uoeSh maze Particle Oh uiHerence
W me- NlIs oooSon' IeaHins nagh III us LIS
o tt Po ME- anu U"luulins MS
Unuiii Us wy IlGnus nave got Nnoie 10,
~ .n,"s9 'ii'V u0i """V anu "oo1un
Ha 10 go,
VI course, went on MIS- Jopson' only
InousuI tndV aS we re now getting along
or.' ana people even OF old-laS 1loned IDEAS
are oecolllng 80 much more lioeral ABOUT
'A ',S.. t,ihsS' why you might
wen l. mightn |, cut IN MI. Jooson,
ana that all there Is about 1t. My old
laShloheuhess SUITS me rlght down TO the
efouiu "Heh 1t comes TO wearing an outnC
u toga 'ndV HaheS any man. no matter
no" ne may shape up III accent azure LOT
sehse' looh IKE poplhJay OF W lllle-poy
or a waiter OF an uhaertaker. W men get
so thaV 1 am "liilhg 10 adu spikes 10 the
rear end OF my coat, want you to call
mack ana nave me shlppeQ over TO that big
pulldlng on the other slde OF the eastern
branch Just as fast as can be taken there.
L am wiling to stand Tor all OF your luna
cles, Ms. Jobson, IKE Mission furniture
and Delft ware and gided milking stools
tied with cherry ribbons IN the parlor, and
all that sort OF tommyrot, but you needn' t
expect that I'm going to become freak
myself Just to give you countenance.
80 you might as well cancel all dates,
now and forever, when it comes to suggest
ing the dress-suit scheme to me. Id as
soon 90 to the theater in a suit of pajamas
Of G-string and string of tigers teeth,
and that : all there is about it. Is the base
ment door locked? All right-Im going to
bed"
Which, even to the hopeful mind Of Mrs.
Jobson, seemed to settle the evening-clothes
proposition, for another year at least.
But it didn't. The .Job,ons were lust sit
ting down at dinner the other evening when
a small boy lugged an oblong box down the
basement step and rang the bell. Mrs.
Iobson answered she ring and received the
box. which she brought into the dining
room with an expression of justification
Mr. Jobson. ON the other hand. wore a
sheeDisb look
"Whati it," INQUIRED Mrs. Jobson. hold
inc the box m and examining the ont side
of il curiou,lv as woman will examine
the outside of a telegram and wonder who
has semi it. without thinking of openinp it
70 lind ont
Look and see" said Mr.. Jobson. in