The semi-weekly messenger. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1897-1908, 1903-04-24
Copyright, 1903, by Robert Howard
RuSsell.)

Russell.)
There once lived at a prominent rail-
way junction a local swell known as
Wilbur. He was what one might call
n That is, he was a lit
tie shy on Weight, but what he liked
in Ayoirdupois he made UP in Nerve.
He was a Fresh GaZabe who could get
away with anything. For instance, he
could sit in a Lady's Lap for an Hour
at a time without starting any Scandal
and yet if a full-grown Man tried to
hold this same Lady's Hand for a
couple of Minutes, just to be soclable,
she would tell around hat she had
been Insulted.
In speaking of Wilbur the Girls usu-
ally said that he was Cute, or else just
too Cunning for any use. The Men
said various Things about him but
Wha they said does not come under
the head of Sunday Reading.
Every Debutante wanted to veal
him on her Chatelaine but most of the
Men were plotting to drop a little Prus-
sic Acid into his Ice Cream
For some Reason or other h gabby
young SQUAD who is a Ten-Strike with
the Dolly Grays never stands very Ace
with the Poker Players.
w IeH d IIldII Ids PuI Jill
Esmeralda up on a Pedestal a mile
high and is silently waiting for the
Day when he will know her Well
enough to carelessly throw n Arm
over the back Of the Chair, it makes
him Hop-Eyed to see some 90-pound
Rabbit with an immortal Rind chase
Up to the Goddess and give her the
k~itchy-kitchy Business under the Chm
and call her Babe"
The Pocket-editiOn Society Boy can
take Liberties that would cause the
Six-FOOter to be murdered n thrown
into the River. ,
Wilbur was the busiest little Insect
that ever buzzed and his work had
q Mahogany Finish He could put in
an Afternoon with five or six boule-
ward Netties and make every n Of
them think that she was the High
Card. He ordered his Photographs by
the Hundred and he had collected
enough Locks of Hair to stuff a Mat
tress.
His den was richly decorated with
Trophies of the Chase and the Post
man became lop-sided from delivering
his Mail.
There is such a Thing as being too
Popular and that was what alled
Wilbur. He was being passed around
all the while and never had time 10
devote himself to any particular
Queen and besides. he didn't meet very
many that were Particular. He 1ut-
tered from Flower to Flower n he
did not have the Heart to tie up with
any one of the Bunch and make her
his Steady because he knew that the
others would pine away or else re-
nounce the World and enter a Con-
vent.
One Reason why Wilbur had such a
strong Pull with the Buds was that ne
never permitted his Work to interfere
with his Social Duties. They could get
him on the Phone at any time ano
book him for any kind OF a Stun
from a Luncheon to a Golf Tourney
He kept his Evening Clothes at the
office and he could respond to a Din
ner Invitation like a Fireman gong to
a Fire. He never side-stepped q
chance to eat. .
One of his prize Specialties was tc
play sympathetic Companion to the
Woman whose Husband belongs to
Club. He cultivated the antique Hens
who make out the Invitation Lists anc
that is why Wilbur usually led th'
German and distributed the faFour
when the Smart Set pulled off d co
tillon.
Although he was on Salary he some
how contrived to hold up his End
Fortunately, his Board did not cos
him anything and he squared all OF nj
Society Obligations by making Part.
Calls, instead of sending American
Beauties.
Inasmuch as all of the real Tessie
were more or less crazy o Wilbu
it seemed a lead-pipe Certainty that n
would land an Heiress who would tax
him to PALM Beach on a Wedding lou
and hen pay his Tailor Bills for al
time. However, so many were on nj
Trail that not one of them had
s Tr1-& TT1n
Hortense would get him off into a Cor
ner to tell him that she loved Blu
Eyes, Beryl would come along and be
gin to stroke him Hair and then Clar
ice would come up n lin Niolets o.
him.
A SeIling-Plater can keep after on
Girl. and finally bound her into maxim
a Promise but the Honey Boy has t
PLAY a Circuit all the time Wilbu
usually had about Al Names IN nj
Date-Book.
He never ran short because Whe
the Junes Brides dropped out a ne7
Cro~ fresh from the Boarding School,
came in to fill the Vacancies.
Year after Year. the Ladies ld'
continued his Misunderstanding Caree
not because he wished to be Cru bl
because he couldn't help being so al
fired Enhancing.
There never was a time when II
could have put a Tag on any Dulcine
without putting a Blight on the er
tire Female Community, so he waite
In fact. he overdid the Waiting Ac
About the time that he outgrew n
Hair and began to look a little puff
around the Eyes, the Lumty-Tul
Elite caught the Athletic Fever. tt
Real Boy in Sassiety was the husb
Fellow who had played on a COLES
Eleven and who owned a string
Polo Ponies.
Little Wilbur. the has-been Midg
found that he could drift into a Draw