The Kalispell bee. [volume] (Kalispell, Mont.) 1900-192?, 1903-07-31

the minds, or, rather, in the digestive
apparatus. of my auditors that they
subsequently devoured manipulated
mutton under the pleasing impression
that they were dining on chicken GRO
quotes.
1t is perhaps needless to state that
the fame of my sea story spread be-
yond the confines of my own home.
The marine word painting was all the
more appreciated because of the geo.
graphical location of our inland city.
At the club they were never tired of
listening to the tapping of the waves
against the corrugated sides of the me-
tallic life raft. Give me three minutes
start, they said. with spanking
breeze abaft the miZZen, and it was
bowsprits to Delaying pins that Clark
Russell could not overhaul me in an
evenings time.
Whenever a guest of distinction was
present at the club my sea story was
expected as matter of course. Upon
such occasions would make the wind
roar through the rigging and the an
Choir chain rattle through the hawse
hole. Every time the vessel careened l
would bury her rail under a breaker,
and then, as she righted herself, you
could fairly hear the water gurgling
out through the scuppers.
But to return to the French admiral
and the affair Of honor which has been
town talk for fortnight Personally
l have done everything possible to
quiet the wild rumors regarding the
encounter in the banquet hall. but they
reoccur so persistently and are so
grossly distorted that l feel forced to a
plain statement of facts.
1t seems that the fellow had been
foistcd upon the club by an obscure
member named briggs. For two even
ings this obtrusive Frcnchman had mo-
nopoliZed the general conversation and
Wearied the members with verbose ac-
counts of alleged adventures in five
quarters of the globe. On the third
night Bradlee was delegated by the
long suffering ones to wait upon me
and demand my immediate presence on
penalty.
"You see" he explained, sit is = mat
ter of self preservation. This French
admiral is making life burden for us.
Because we happen to be stranded a
thousand miles from salt water he i'm
AGNES us capable of swallowing his
three masted lies. You must come down
and make him take water. Just heave
to in the offing until he gets well under
way and then cut him out. Crowd on
all sail and give him run for his mon
ey. When you have Overhauled him
bring every gun to bear and squirt a
broadside of gloom into his most vul-
nerable parts. You are the only man in
the state that is qualified to throw the
grapples into his rigging and board
him on equal terms. Remember, there
Is to be no quarter. Make him strike
his cOlors or send him to the bottom.
OF course my words are only fgura-
tive, but you can doubtless follow the
main drift of my remarks"
Now, l leave it to the most cold
blooded II any one could Withstand
such an appeal as that. No man OF
honor could hang back and see his fel
low countrymen put to shame by for
eign invader. Besides, there was every
indication Of sport equal to an interna
! tional yacht race or naval duel be
tween two first class men-of-war.
Lead on" said; this night will
deliver you from the jaw of the enc
my"
When we eventually arrived at tn,
club the Frenchman had already hoist
ed his mainsail and was heading TO
open water. At my entrance every on
smiled save the admiral. He held t
signals which passed between the mem
bers. If remember correctly he wa
loaded with rum and lockwood an
had half the crew down with scurvy.
waited until he had drifted for thre
days, without cloud in the sky an
the sea like Il huge shield of burnishe
brass. Then Bradlee gave me the winl
"And no one" said, "can better al
preciate such n situation than mysel
l have lived through it day by ia.
hour by hour, minute by minute. Q
Feb 13"--
Just then the Frenchman made
noise in his little black beard whiC
sounded like the explosion of W,
tirecracker. He cleared his throat
stamped his foot. he said things whit
are fortunately untranslatable. 1t W;
l all to no purpose. BY that time w,
in latitude 80 degrees and some mi
utes. and the most terrible Stor
which had ever visited the southel
hemisphere had just sheared off o
masts like so many pipestems. Seeil
| that he was clearly outclassed, the n
| miral relapsed into an armchair al
! never again opened his lips until t
crew of the Gloucester whaler pull
| the German passenger off the metal
life raft and threw the first mate
| thigh bone to the sharks.
4 Then the little man sprang up.
"Ver' good" he cried approyingly
EVER good and absolute true! But Y
mistake in this-ze passenger W