Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1903-08-26
|s0ME UNIQUE AADs"
Qaeer Announcements Coz
lected by q Veteran Printer.
DROLL THINGS DESIRED
SECONDHAND ooFFINs AND
THREE-TI1IE WIVES
Man Invites Friends to Sec Him Hung
Some Old Washington
Advertisements.
DROLL THINGS DESIRED

announcements has been gathered by an
old printer and newspaper man. covering
a period of more than three-quarters OF a
century. In this collection almost every
phase OF advertising may be found. and
many of them make interesting reading.
Here follows an extract from the adver-
tisement of a cabinet maker of Cazenovia,
N. Y:
"Coff1ns.-A full assortment Of sizes Of
collins already on hand. Particular atten-
ton paid to repairing old work Prices for
all to suit the times"
Instead of the American expression.
"cast-off clothing the English use left
or clothing" In an English newspaper an
advertisement states that:
Mr.. and Mrs. Brown have left of cloth
ing OF every description, and invite your
careful Inspection
The proprietor of New York barber
shop employing female BARRIERS had this
advertisement on the wall:
I'm order to avoid misunderstanding.
note to all my customers that the lady in
this barber shop Is my wife.
JOHN B. DELLOYORIO."
A hotel keeper in Vermont did not believe
in loafers around his place and posted the
following sign over the Office clock:
This clock is for the use Of guests of the
hotel only
"zion's Fishermens Resterrant Pigs
rect Snow Balls. Ice Cream and Shoes
Half Souled, is the sign over the window
of South Washington negro shack.
Read this patent medicine certificate and
put on 1t the meaning which Is most
natural:
Il continued on using it. and by the time
L had taken five bottles I found myself
completely cured. after having been
brought so near to the gates of death by
means of your invaluable medicine"
This was thoughtful on the part of the
advertiser:
Wanted "A respectable gentleman,
widower preferred. to marry the house
keeper of an aged gentleman. who has been
an invalid for years. and who respects her
as a good and true servant whom he
would like to see in the happy state of
matrimony before he dies. She has had
three husbands. but is willing for fourth"
Massachusetts,. the mother of school
masters and grammars. enacted the follow
Ing in 1862:
Commissioners to take the deposition of
any person without this state engaged in
the regular or volunteer land service of
the United States, may be executed by the
colonel. lieutenant colonel or major of the
regiment In which such person shall at the
time serve. or with which he may be con-
nected." etc.
In the same year the common council of
jackson. Mich, passed the following:
Resolved That the poundmaster be in
structed not to receive into the public
pound any cows that any person may drive
TO the same pound under the age of twenty
one years.
The following was found on the door OF
small dwelling near Bladensburg, the ia
nous dueEng ground in Maryland:
NotieSte-A Houes and lote for rente or
Salie kan b Baugtn or Rnted loe life Enney
on wishes to Rente or Buy kali and see
me- wv
The sentencing of Capt. o. NJ Carter. U.
.. A. to Imprisonment recalls the fact that
IN lt.2 Lieut.. Campbell of the Mfddlesex
(Englan6 militia was found guilty of
forgery and condemned to die for the Of
tense zen On the eve OF the execution he sent
the following to his brother officers:
Lieut.. Campbelrs compliments to -.
ne requests the pleasure Of his company to-
morrow morning. to take a cup of choco-
tate. and to do him the honor to accom-
pany him to Tyburn, to be present at his
execution 1850
This was peculiarly marked dog:
% ReWard-Strayed from the premises
OF the subscriber. in Centreville on the I'd
OF october. small dog near the color of an
opossum. with yellow legs and head and
tail cut of. Any person returning him will
receive the above reward
DANIEL KILROY."
colored couple in Georgia sent out the
following Invitation:
Your presents Is required to a swell
weddin' at the home of the BRIDE Come
one come all! Gentlemens, twenty-five
cents: ladies. fifteen cents"
The following appears In a North Dakota
paper, the author being justice OF the
peace:
Il am reliably informed that some of our
local clergy are cutting prices and thereby
demoralizing business. 1 will not reduce
prices to perform the marriage ceremony
but Will give time. IL necessary or will take
meat. potatoes, grain-in fact. any kind of
produce. and will agree not to kiss the
bride unless perfectly satisfactory-to her"
Even the government gets tangled up
occasionally in advertisements This an
peared in the Washington Republican in
"A CARD.-The attention of the public ia
invited to the sale which will take place
on FRIDAY MORNING, the 10th instant.
at the q. s. Penitentiary. commencing pre-
cisely at o'clock. Purchasers will have
to settle as knocked down, If not, they win
be put up and resold, as they will have to
be removed as sold. on account of the Gov
eminent wanting 1t Immediately. By order
of II. l. KING. Warden"
This must have been one of the longest
sermons ever preached in the state of
Iowa:
ADVENT MEETINGs-Eld D. M. Can
right of Boston. and Elder z. w Farues-
worth. President of the Iowa Conference
will preach in the Baptist Church from Fri
day evening. April 5, till Monday evening""
But II the males grew whiskers while lis
tenfng to the sermon they could step into a
barber shop where the sign "Whiskeis Died
Here" hung in the window
A Philadelphia paper recently printed the
following.
"WANTED-A young unmarried woman.
without children, wants position as cook or
This IS from an old copy of an English
journal:
"Wanted-for sober family, a man of
Hight weight. who fears the Lord and can
drive pair of horses. He must occasion
ally wait at table, join the household pray-
er. look after the horses and read chap
ter of the Bible. He must, God willing.
arise at O'Clock in the morning and obev
his master and mistress In all lawful com
mands. If he can dress hair sing psalms
and play at cribbage the more agreeable
The following notice was posted on the
court house door Of a Kentucky town:
IN. b. take pur ticker Motifs that thar
Is now in the Jale of boyd county XIV
negroe man bearing the name of Jackson
marioe from maxuray as he says Delivered
to me buey A pur mitamus from the Justis
Of the peas OF said county on the 5of June
lS62 P. T. JILSON''
The Star OF Hope. newspaper printed in
the prison at Sing Sing. had the following:
''L0st-A good character: the owner viii
give all OF his earthly possessions for its
return and no questions asked Address
Clinton Prison."
Atlantic City has a number of hotels |
given over to ''stags," and one of these dis |
plays the following signs:
PARTIES contemplating suicide win be