davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1903-12-27

Uncle Sans employees are the drum
mers and buglers Of the United States
Marine Corps. These lads receive, In
addition to their board and clothes, only
SIS a month-less than one-sixth of the
amount that goes into the pockets Of
the average page at the Capitol. and yet
~ reason Of the opportunity afforded TO
see the world many youngster will
choose the Marine Corps position in
preference to the other. TWO Of these
music boys" a drummer AMI a bugIer.
are attached 70 every United States var
vessel which carries a detachment OF
marines-the soldiers Of the navy
and this means. of course. all the prir-
eipal floating fortresses flying the stars
and Stripes.
These lads have plenty OF opportunity
for sightseeing or for picking up a
trade if they be industriously inclined.
for their duties when ahoat are limited
to two calls day when in port. and
none at all when at sea Any boy be-
tween fourteen and sixteen years OF
age may take up this work, and uEder
the terms of his enlistment. he is ex-
pected TO continue in the service until
twenty-one years Of age. As a prelin-
mary to actual service the lads spend
from three months TO a year at a pre-
paratory school at washington. where
they practice for six hours a day beat
ing drums and sounding trumpets. The
Government pays az. expenses. even to
providing the brilliant blue uniforms
which they wear. During the instruc-
ton period there is withheld from each
boys pay the sum of So montaIy-s1 for
each OF his three instructors. There are
several hundred Of these music boys
in the service. and anywhere from thirty
TO seventy are under training at Wash
ington ali the time.
In addition to all the principal c. SECS
Of boy employees. there are youthful
workers in almost every branch of the
service They are found
in considerable numbers in the Revenue
Cutter Service, the Rural Free Delivery
Service. the Railway Mail Service. etc.
and there are even some boys who have
not yet reached their majority in tho
at Washington. a notable
example is found in the person OF Earl
Shaw, the twenty-year-old son OF the
Secretary of the Treasury. who has re-
Gently taken up clerical work at a very
modest salary in the department over
which his father presides.
The Washington times., 1903-12-27
Sent to the %Rockpile."

Down in my State" said Represent.
alive from the land OF peanuts, when Q
fellow is sent TO the Changing or work
house it is called going TO the rock,
pile One Of my constituents, who is
holding down cases in the Government
Printing Office, made a request of me
10 use my best efforts to get him trans,
ferred TO the night force. and I wen;
out and had a talk with Foreman Rick
etts about the matter. l heard nothing
from the matter until several days az
terward. when 1 got a note from my
friend and constituent, simply saying:
Dear Judge: The devils to pay and
to the rockpile. II you ever did a poor
me. and do II quick.
well, / at once made il up IN nv
mind that my friend had been fighting
Indians and had been pulled by the
police and sent to the 'rockpHe' in de-
fault of a fine. l hurried down to the
police court, where found that no such
person had been before the bar of jus
tice. Then imagined that perhaps he
had given an assumed name, but the
judge assured me that no person an
swering the description had been be-
fore him. hurried out TO the big print
cry. and found that my friend was plug
ging type in the specification room, and
that that division was known 10 the
printers as the rockpile because it is
regarded as the most <ificult one in
which TO get up the average number Of
type required for q days work
Il was considerab bly, worried but the
mistake was so laughable that / had
The Washington times., 1903-12-27
Court Couldn't See It.

Some queer and startling evidences
OF insanity are brought out in trials for
lunacV, said Representative johnson OF
South Carolina. Il remember. that a
Dutch farmer living near my home be-
came very much alarmed at the rapid
manner in which his son was giving
away his hard earnings, and he at
tempted to put stop to il by having
his son declared non compos mentis.
At the hearing the father was asked
how long he had believed his son in
sane.
About year. was the reply.
-" And what cavSed you to first no.
tice his queer behavior
He fined the church.
What else did you see to cause
you to doubt his sanity
Why. sir, John give the parson a
whole load of hay and five bushels of
potatoes. He's crazy. just as sure as
snakes. and ought to be locked up
There being no stronger. evidence
than this. the young Dutchman was per-
mitted to resume the management OF
his own affairs"
The Washington times., 1903-12-27
STOCKS AND RoULETTE.

~ ICHARD Garfield is a lucky
X MAJ Not only does he get offers
1 from the Haute Voice. OF France.
to be the chief steward Of an exclusive
gaming house, but he also makes money
IN the stock market One day last week.
for instance. he cleaned up the nest
little sum OF $500. 000-just enough 70 fur
nish a couple OF rne=ns in his Paris
salon s ,ording TO the most approved
taste of his own fastidious ideas on
what art should be. This information
Is NOS merely idle gossip OF some Wall
Stree men. but comes from a re-
sponsible broker who happened to know
about il.
The Washington times., 1903-12-27
One by Tillman.

Senator Tillman does not often engage
in yarn-spinning, but when he does, 1t
is something good Recently he told this
one:
In my State. and not very far from
Columbia, there lived a preacher whose
modesty never deferred from him urg-
ing upon his congregation liberal sub
scriptions of money for az church and
benevolent purposes In private solicita-
lions he one day met a good, but eccen-
trio member. who. for a long time had
steadfastly refused 10 aid an object the
preacher was solicitous to secure. At
last importantly triumphed, condition
ally. The eccentric member agreed to
contribute on condition that he be al
lowed TO choose the text from which the
The Washington times., 1903-12-27
REALLY GOOD STORIES TOLD BY AND ABOUT CONGRESS4EN
kk"HE giving Of Christmas gifts
and the playing Of Christmas
a Jokes" said Representative

II" HE giving Of Christmas gifts
and the playing of Christmas
4 jokes" said Representative
Adamson. OF Georgia, will
always bring 10 my mind one of the
most laughabie things I ever read in a
newspaper. There was in my own State
one OF the brightest men who ever pen
ned a line but he occasionally went be-
yond the dead-line in his love for the
fluid. He wrote a story several years
ago. just after Christmas. telling why
he had quit drinking ] remember that
he wrote that he had done the square
thing by old Santa Claus and his num-
erous family were well provided for He
had likewise not neglected 70 get a quart
of undertaker's delight which he said he
hit at frequent intervals during Christ
mas Eve. The good wife and eldest
girls concluded TO play a Christmas
trick on the husband and father-one of
the best fellows in the world. A small
rubber doll which would emit squeak
when pressed. was procured and this
Was fried in a thick batter. and set be-
fore him for his breakfast. the wife
telling him that IL was the leg OF a rab-
bit With an unsteady hand he took
the knife and fork and began the cut
ting act, the first pressing down of
the knife causing the rubber doll 70
send forth a Squeak which made him
drop his knife and look around in thor
ough alarm. Not q word was said and
after a little while he repeated the
operation, only 20 hear another squeak
and gain he dropped his knife The
thirG trial resulted the same. and then
he asked
Dear. is-iss-is this blamed cotton
tail daa1?
Certainly. it's dead was the re-
ply
Then. by links. I've got em good
and hard and he left the table. and
says he hunted "A justice Of the peace
ana swOre on
1T was many months before the fell
low knew that he had been tricked. and
IL was many months more before he
The Washington times., 1903-12-27
Rough on Chicago.

THE seeming determination on the
part of the feed joint proprietors of
Chicago TO simply size up a man and
take all he has during the national con-
vention." said a Representative from
Missouri. brings TO my mind an expert
ence 'Snollygoster' Ham. the Georgia
humorous lecturer, had in the Windy
City. Ham. strange 10 say. had quite
a roll of money in a wallet IN his over
coat, and while at one Of the big hotels
there he absented himself from his
room for a moment, and when he re-
turned the pocketbook and money were
gone. He was just about ready to go
TO the depot, "A few blocks away, 10
catch a train for a neighboring city
where he was billed for a lecture that
hight. The lecturer had stopped at the
same hotels a number Of times and had
The Washington times., 1903-12-27

livery service, these dull periods are
growing fewer and further between. A
boy who aspires to enter Uncle Sam 3
service as a special delivery messenger
must provide himself with bicycle. and
h is expected to provide himself with
uniform. but this he gets at wholesale
rate through the Government, the suit
and cap complete costing not more than
SIC or S12.
The aristocrats among Uncle Sans
boy employees are the pages who work
in the marble halls of the United States
Capitol at Washington. They are the
best paid of all the lads who draw
money from the Government and hold
The Washington times., 1903-12-27

him of it. He is never "docked'' for
Sundays or holidays. which means that
he receives pay for the fun thirty or
thirty-one days in each month. and. bet
ter luck stili, he is never paid less than
a full months salary. Thus If Congress
is in session but one day in a month the
fortunate pages draw their SO or $3.50
just as though they mad been toiling
throughout the entire four weeks
But more wonderful still. is the fact
that the page boys salary. big as it is,
by no means comprises the sum total
of his earnings. Every page in the
House of Representatives averages 81 a
week in tips over and above his regu-
lar stipend This feeling is not per-
The Washington times., 1903-12-27

positions which are. in the eyes of
young America, the cream of Govern
ment jobs. There are upward Of half a
hundred pages in the House of Repre-
Der in the Senate. There are supposed
to be no pages under twelve years Of
age and none over sixteen. but as
matter Of fact both these limits are dis
regarded more or less.
In the matter OF money making, the
Congressional page comes pretty near
having the greatest boon enjoyed by any
American boy. He receives the very
tidy salary of $3.50 day. and no per-
son, not even his parents. can deprive
The Washington times., 1903-12-27

fervor and there were frequent 'Amens'
from the listeners. Finally. Lord said
the petitioner. bless TO us the exhor-
tation of the hour and him who deliv-
cred it. Bless him abundantly and let
him be anathema maranatha-'
There was a smile played over the
diYine's face as he said aside. the good
Lord forbid -
The Washington times., 1903-12-27
A Too Literal Application.

Rev. Or. Gibson is one of the most
learned divines in the city of Baltimore, =
said Representative Mudd of Maryland.
and I recently heard a good story on
him and one OF his iock. The doctor
was preaching from the text If any
man love not the Lord Jesus Christ, let
him be anathema maranatha.' He han
died the subject with force and elO-
quence and closed with solemn repe-
titiOn OF the awful curse, and then re-
quested one OF the brothers to lead in
prayer. The brother prayed with great
The Washington times., 1903-12-27
Copyright, 1908. by Walden Fawoett.)
r rNCLE SAN has twenty thousa

T UNCLE SAM has twenty thousand
boy employees on his big payroll.
~ They are scattered not only in
every part of the country. but
in every quarter of the globe. and they
pursue widely different avocations.
Some of these youngsters receive very
modest pay. but others draw salaries
equal to those of many men. Included
in the great army of juvenile workers
under the Stars and Stripes are lads
Who are learning to be ''Jaekies'' with a
view TO future service on our war YES
sells. pages in both houses of Congress
and the United States Supreme Court.
drummer boys and buglers on the
American warships, special delivery
messengers in postofices in all parts
OF the country; and other toilers in one
branch or another of the public service
In point OF numbers one Of the most
important divisions of this junior labor
army is made mp of the lads who are
getting into trim to perform the work of
full-hedged "Jaclzies" on United States
men-of-war. The Navy Department
now has facilities for training annually
upward Of nine thousand Of these young
men-most of them being given instruc-
ton Oh the Atlantic coast. These lads
begin their work for Uncle Sam with a
six or nine months course of instruc-
ton at the training station at New
port. r. l.. or San Francisco in case
they are destined for apprentices, or a
three months instruction course in case
they are TO serve as landsmen. The
period Of work on shore is followed by
an interval Of six or three months on
training ships, and then the new mem
Der Of the naval force is transferred to
a full-hedged man-of-war.
Must Be Willing to Work.
Generally speaking. # is useless for
any boy to enter Uncle Sans service
II he is afraid of work, and particularly
is this the case in the navy. The boys
in our sea-hghting service have a very
busy time of it from the minute they
enter this field of activity During
their first few months on shore these
boys are expected TO learn how to care
sor their persons and their clothing.
TO master the knack Of going aloft
:
The Washington times., 1903-12-27
Just Take EN- Out.

Representative Clayton of Alabama
tells this one.
The testimony in the case was all in.
and while the eloquent summing up OF
the counsel and the learned charge OF
the court were still echoing through the
halls OF justice the court ordered con,
stable forward 10 take charge OF the
jury while celebrating on a verdict.
The officer appeared with uplifted hand.
and the court began the usual oath:
You do solemnly swear that you
Will take the jury TO some convenient
place and there them safely keep. with,
out but here the judge failed TO re-
member the balance OF the oath. and
concluded with and all the rest of the
little fixings-you know what they are
better than ! do. Take the jury out
The Washington times., 1903-12-27

preachers funeral sermon should be
preached. The matter was thus settled
and the minister wanted to know what
the text would be. His friend answered:
- I shall request the minister to preach
from very appropriate text-"And the
beggar died
The Washington times., 1903-12-27

and making and furling sails. and to
become so familiar with the manual at
arms that they can drill with the pre-
cision of veterans. On shipboard they
need to work even harder for they are
expected to gain within the brief space
of a few months a pretty full insight
into seamanship and gunnery-both bis
subjects. The gunnery course embraces
much more than the mere knowledge
of how to shoot straight and how to
repair gun if it is damaged. and the
boy who is up on seamanship knows
not only the different kinds of vessels
and the different parts of each Of them.
but has also some practical knowledge
of how to handle almost any craft that
floats. In this connection it might be
mentioned that some OF these lads after
they graduate into the full honors of
a jackie's position are yet young enough
to be designated as boy employees"
but If this class of young men or the
younger contingent at Annapolis and
West Point be included, Uncle Sans
enrolment would be far above the
5000 mark
Us numerous as the boy tackles"
and increasing in number even more
rapidly than the juvenile sailors. are the
uniformed messengers who perform the
work OF delivering special delivery let
tiers at the postof1ces throughout Uncle
Sans domains. This force is divided
into detachments OF widely varying
size. ranging, in fact, all the way from
the body of several hundred messengers
employed in each of the largest cities,
such as New York, Boston and Chicago.
to the lone courier attached to the
postoffice in a small town. These boy
messengers, who range in age from
fourteen to nineteen years. do not re-
ceive regular salaries. but are paid on
the basis of the amount of work per
formed.
A Generous Employer.
Uncle Sam is quite generous to these
hustling lads. He allows them cents
of the 10 which he receives for trans
hitting a special delivery letter. Thus
II a boy pedals lively and has a good
run Of luck he may readily earn mans
wages. On the other hand he must en-
counter the bugbear Of days when his
earnings are pretty small. but owing to
the growing utilization of the special de-
The Washington times., 1903-12-27

Smart Youngsters on the Payroll Of the National Gov
ernneHt-How They Lend Helping Hands in Many
Branches Of the PubHc Service--Young Jackies,
Congressional Pages. Drunners and BugleTs, and
Special Delivery Messengers, All Have Places in
the Big juvenile Army :. :. :: :. :: ::
The Washington times., 1903-12-27
One on Tom Marshall.


Good stories Of Tom Marshall are Of
ten heard in the cloak rooms, and
though sometimes old, they never wear
of all the genuine goodness. An Ohio
Congressman says thaSon one occasion
Tom Marshall was engaged in a trial
before rather ignorant justice OF the
peace Tom tried to convince the dis
penser Of justice and law that he had
made an erroneous decision on Ger
tain point, and for this purpose he cited
authorities from King Solomon all the
way down. piling tome on tome. until
the justice was ready TO declare that
he didn't care a darn for all the au-
thorities nor Tom Marshall, asther. AZ
ter Marshall had exhausted himself, he
said:
VIII your honor please fine me $40
for contempt Of court?'
=" For what? asked the astOnished
magistrate. You have committed no
contempt Of court
But. replied the nlustrious Tom. 4
assurs you 1 have a most Internal con-
tempy for it
AND TIE justice accommodated Tom
The Washington times., 1903-12-27

finally said, Mr.. Villas, that horse is
named Matt Ransom, an I'm just
keepin him for Style
Ransom never forgave Mr.. Villas for
this joke. and there came near being
trouble about 1t. from the fact that Mr..
Was said that Sorth Carolina kept
Ransom in the Senate for his style
The Washington times., 1903-12-27

pressed Old Betsy to his lips The
story he wrote was the funniest thing
ever read"
Hanging Together.
Did you ever hear OF the preacher
who prayed that the House and Senate
might hang together" asked Champ
Clark 1T comes TO me this way:
The man Of God was sending up a
petition that the law-makers-we are
the ones-might hang together; that the
times were trying. and that united and
concerted action was necessary for the
good Of the country. At the point in his
petition TO the Throne Of Grace where
he asked that they might hang to-
gesher. a member Of the congregation.
evidently a disappointed candidate. said,
Yes, and the sooner the better; this is
the prayer Of all good people.
g But my friend. said the parson,
L don't mean as the brother does
mean that they may hang together in
accord and concord.
mo matter what cord returned the
member. so it's n good and strong
one
The Washington times., 1903-12-27
Kept Him for Style.

Few, If any Senator's. dress with as
much care as did Ransom OF North
Carolina. he was always particular
about his linen and his general appear
ance-in fact. he went heavy on style.
All of which brings TO mind a story re-
lated by Senator Villas after a trip to
Buncombe county. y. c. Mr. Villas sa d
that while in that State he met a gen
tleman who invited him TO his home to
look at very fine horse. He was a
handsome animal, said the Senator.
and I asked II he was OF Hambletonian
stock. He replied in the negative. In re-
ply 10 a question if the horse was fast,
/ was told that he couldn't catch a ter
rapin. / asked a number OF questions
hoping to find out what the animal was
priced 50 highly for, and If ne really
possessed any good qualities. and why
such excellent care WAS given him
was almost paralyzed when my friend
The Washington times., 1903-12-27

to dig down in my jeans and produce
for liquid refreshments for my friend
and his alley mates
The Elbert County tribune., 1903-06-04
immediate morphinI.m Cure.


In the Medical Record for April 10.
DR.. Margaret b. Halleck OF the New
York State Reformatory for Women
reports four cases of successful treat
ment Of the morphine habit by sudden
ly and completely stopping the supply
of the drug. and administering strych-
nine sulphate. hyoscine hydrobromate
and codelne sulphate.
Summing up the result of her treat
ment. DR.. Halleck says; "Strychnine
hyosclne and codeine certainly form n
perfect antidotal combination and one
which works quickly. Morphine. as
we know. depresses the nervous sys-
TEN, reduces metabolism, hinders the
action of the liver. finally paralyzes
the vaso-motor centers. and lessons all
secretions. Strychnine, on the other
hand, stimulates all functions. In
creases the appetite and while doing
this 1t is eliminating the morphine
Nausea. restiessness. insomnia and
pain are cared for by the hyoscine
and codeine. 1t seems reasonable that
this combination should cure In time,
hut the celebrity OF cure. with no suf
ferlng to speak OF, and the very small
amount OF medicine used, is certainly
remarkable These cases may relapse.
but It will not be because they are
unable to fight the habit"
The Elbert County tribune., 1903-06-04
A Wav 10 Make Monev.

When you boys and girls were ba-
bies and knew no better you used to
pull every one of your toys to pieces.
No matter how pretty or how expen-
sive they were to pieces they would
come. And probably mother and faith
er. after trying to break you of this
bad habit, made up their minds that
you were genius, and wanted to find
out how all your different toys were
made.
How many of you could put the
pieces back in place? Not many, I'll
warrant
But now. that you are older, it is
easy to replace the loose parts of toys
and other articles.
Why not make this a little business
and earn some money by 1t? There
are many homes where broken things
accumulate for years, sometimes
never being mended
Now boys or girls. II you have care
full, neat fingers, steady hands and
accurate eyes, this is good sugges.
ton for you to follow
Buy small bottle of cement and a
small bottle of glue, IL you have
ehoush Hiohsy. III hoi. nnotner OF iatn-
er or uncle will perhaps lend you the
money for an investment.
Armed with these weapons, visit the
neighbors and offer to mend china.
crockery and bric-a-brac. Practice at
home first II you can and be sure your
pieces are in the right places.
As you become expert. you will find
that you need plaster of paris. putty. a
small box of paints and some varnish.
The plaster and putty are to I'LL up
chinks where pieces are missing; the
paint to color them, and the varnish
to finish off II necessary.
Try this little plan and see what a
success you can make os it with the
help of the three p's-pluck. patience
and perseverance.
The Elbert County tribune., 1903-06-04
Jolly Evening Games.

A number of jolly evening sames
can be played with ordinary pins. one
scent paper of which will supply the
foundation for an evenings amuse-
ment.
A paper-spearing contest-Tear or
cut clean scrap paper into inch
squares and pile them on paste
board box lid. There should be sew
eral handfuls, enough to make good
sized heap.
Place the box lid in the center of
the table at which the game is to be
played and give each player a pin.
The fun consists in seeing who in the
fifteen minutes allotted to the game
can spear the most pieces with his
pin.
By the rules of the game only one
piece of paper may be taken on the
pin at one time. If two are captured
by mistake both must be returned to
the pile.
A small prize may be given to the
boy or girl having the most squares
when the game is at an end.
Pins and marbles-Each boy or girl
receives three pins, which are stuck
upright in the carpet. Marbles are
then used to bowl over the gins. Nat
urally, there must be a prearranged
place for the pins to be stuck and for
the bowler to stand. in order that
everybody shall have an equal chance.
If more than one boy or girl should
succeed in downing all three pins in
the three bowls allowed by the rules,
the successful players can have rub
ber" games together until one or the
other becomes champion.