The Corvallis times. (Corvallis, Or.) 1888-1909, 1903-05-06

| giving up the champion ship when
an unforeseen event transpired
which will permit him to retain the
belt, for a time at least.
On the 28th day of April gem
tlemau arrived in town and called
on the BARRIERS in particular. He
introduced himself as the walking
delegate of the Pristine Order of
Prevaricators. He had noticed by
the TIMES that there was about to
be public contest between two
teams Of liars; that public contests
of this nature was right reserved
to the members of the order; that
| any Infringement would be fol-
lowed by boycott, and that all the
power Of the prevaricators' union
would be brought to bear upon the
person or persons who disregarded
the organization mandate; that it
was the wish Of the state board of
barber examiners that all full
fedged BARRIERS become members
of the order; that probably next
year this requirement would be in
corporated in the conditions neces-
sary to secure barbers license.
The walking delegate seemed to
mean business. and while his ad
monitions had more or less effect
on all who expected to take part
in the contest, they settled the mat
ter SO far as the BARRIERS were con-
cerned, and with them out, the con-
test would be too tame for any
thing. So the great event has been
declared off for the present.
While in Corvallis the walking
delegate put forth much effort to
secure recruits to his organization,
but our gifted liars, as stated pre-
viously, are ohsh when they come
to be lined up and counted. Mr..
Brunk of the Occidental hotel is
the only member he secured. We
give here partial copy of the GER
tifcate of membership:
To our most honored Brothers
throughout the World and IN the
Islands of the Sea, Greeting:
"Now know ye. That we,
the Great Copt, and the Seven
Master Liars of the Pristine Order
of Prevaricators by virtue of the
great power vested in US by the
First Great Copt in the Fourth
Dynasty of the Reign of the Pha-
raohs, in the Tomb beneath the
Pyramid of Cheops, the Greatest
of the Pyramids of Ghizeh, before
the Twelve Gods of Egypt, do, by
this mystic power certify that H.
M Brunk, has been admitted into
the Deep Mysteries of our order
and
1--WE therefore, proclaim him TO
be Graceful, Talented and Gifted !
Liar of the 33rd Degree, and we
command Our brothers throughout
the world to recognize and honor
him as such, for be it known that
be is, by this nobleorder, Licensed
and Privileged to lie for the rest of
his natural lifetime, and to lie For
ever Thereafter in the grave, pro.
viding he keeps in good standing
BY yearly contributing fly cents to
The Lyre, the official organ of the
order. thereby aiding in the SUBJ
lime work of reviving the lost but
noble art of lying
The document is duly signed
Ind has the ''sacred sear' affixed,
There is more or less specula-
ion as to Brunk's object in al
ying himself with this organiza-
ion. Almost all the drummers be-
ong. and some think Brunk Joined
o assist in retaining his popularity
With that class. Others believe
hat Brunk has an interest in Jim
-ewis' real estate business located
n the hotel, and on account of
inns modesty, Brunk is compelled
o do the lying for the firm and
wants to do it according to regu-
atoms.