Mower County transcript., 1903-12-02
FARMER BEN'S COLUMN.

FARMER BEN'S COLUMN.
Comrade Van SAINT has the laugh on
>alot Of politicians who were jumpin'
on his back like a lot of shock tops onto
down in football game because they
were sure he was goin' to run agen for
governor. He didn't say a word but
like Brer Rabbit jest lay low and now
that it's all out that he had no idea .of
runnin' agen the pack of his persecu-
tors and attackers is huntin' any sort OF
a hole to hide. I amt stuck on Van
SAINT for some OF the appointments he
made in this county and the crowd he
trained with here, but when it comes to
all-round administration he's got nifty
leetle to be ashamed of. And when
the politicians try to make fun OF the
merger issue on Van then Farmer Ben's
bristles are all up quick. Why, maybe
the gumps don't know yet that the
merger matters hav received the wisest
considerations of the supreme court OF
the United States and that the mer-
gerities hav had the very best liars in
the United States to defend 'em in
their lawless unrighteousness and that
the decisions hav gone against the mer-
gerities and in favor of the people ex-
cept from Bill Lochreu that all the old
soldiers despise as Cleveland's pension
boss who sent spies out all over to hur-
ry and worry and insult honest old SOL
diers who have more patriotism and
honor to the square inch than a thous'
and such migrate spies as was sent out
under Iochren. l see that Lochren's
decision don't count for a cent and
that the mergerites are gettin' scared
and are otferin' to back down on the
whole combine business and let the
roads unlawfully combined go back to
their original control. And don't you
ever forget that it was Van SAINT who
the courage to start this merger agita-
ton all by his own fat self.
o e o
Ain glad that the state board Of
control has sat down Oh the board OF
pardons and refused to let Frank
Hamilton, the Minneapolis murderer,
out of the penitentiary where he has
been only for two years for KILN his
fellow man. 1t was all in drunken
row in the swell hotel in Minneapolis
at an early hour on Sunday morning
when the hotel saloon was open con-
trary to law and when the final drunken
brawl and mixup was over one man
lay dead and it was proved by a jury
onto Hamilton. Now I'm thinkin that
his two years in the pen has been a
good time for him to mediate on the
folly of the good time business on
which 1 expatiated in my last produc-
ton. He ought to have been abed and
asleep and not carousin' out in the dark
hours when evil and deviltry stalk
abroad to way lay and destroy. If he
had kept out Of the good time business
he would hav kept out of prison and
disgrace and dishonor and murder. It
don't pay to take chances on givin' the
devil loose rein with you, for the ex.
perienced old cuss will drive you to ruin
at an acceleratin' that is like a toboggin
slide at the last end. But my compli-
ments are to the state board OF pardons
that is continually lettin' out criminals
until it's gettin' so man can commit
any kind Of crime and hav a pretty
fair show of bein' pardoned out after a
short sentence. This is what makes
the vicious take so many chances in
committin' murders and robberies and
embezzlements and deviltry generally
because they hav an idee that the board
of pardons will be easy to work.
Those high headed senators down at
Washington need to be taken down
hard for their uppishness and low down
general cussedness. After Tawney and
the rest of the loyal representatives had
promptly passed the Cuban reciprocity
bill in order to meet our obligations to
our ward, and the bill had gone into
the senate, the chumps there got on
their "dignity" if anybody can tell what
senatorial dignity is, and they put off
action on the bill until the regular ses-
sion in December just to "giv Presi'
doo4 Rooaouolf loeaonO for calm, the