davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New-York tribune., 1903-03-01
SANITY WEATHER PROPHETS.
om The LondOn Chronicle

From The London Chronicle.
In the reign of Henry Viii prorIarn~t1 ~ vas
issued against almanac makers encouraging tHe 7s-
lief in saints ruling the weather NotWlt thSt',.lTS 3
this and Similar efforts to explode popular NOTION.
certain saints days are however. still supposed 10
assist in what may be called long distance fgT@-
cSSTS ST Catharfne whose festival falls OF N"-
Tember 25, is such a saint. for as az at1'irlHN'
foul or fair so will the February N"St"F-
- tEsrs we're ALI sorts of weather. the erneTr 8
being under the control of gale that was hiii~t
ing In the west. HaloeS. too have recently nH' =
seen round the moon. that the orAnS Tor a Itir
G Cafharfne's Day were not very satisfactory
New-York tribune., 1903-03-01
FISH STORIES IN COURT

The members Of the Protective League OF Salt
Water Fishermen. besides urging legislation against
the wanten slaughter of food fish in nets, hold
court each month at their headquarters NO 1Ve
West Thrty.frst~st at which questions OF profound
interest to the fishing world adjudicated. The
calendar of this court is not arranged with any
New-York tribune., 1903-03-01

int @ s:r s ea % % & ere " stupid
The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1903-07-23
SLEEPS OUT OF DOORS.
Coloradoan Thinks It Conduces t,
Health in Dry Climate.

Though [ have a very comfort
able house, | have for years made a
practice of sleeping out Of DOORS"
said Mr.. j. P. Pomeroy, who is known
as one Of the wealthy and enterpris-
ing citizens of Colorado to a Wash
ington Post reporter. 81 do not ex-
actly 60 out into the yard, but my
bed is placed on the front porch and
the winds of heaven have a fair sweep
at me.
"Such a practice is not to be COM
mended in a climate as damp as you
have in Washington, but in the dry
atmosphere Of Colorado it conduces
to health, and some of our leading
doctors advise their patients that
out-of-door sleeping is better for
them than physic. Asaconsequence,
many people in my town, Colorado
Springs, forsake their bedrooms and
go out in the open air to slumber, and
1 haven't seen any who follow the
practice that do not agree that it has
brought benefit"
The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1903-07-23
Paper and Tallow Bullets.

1t is generally supposed that moth
ing save a metal bullet could com
mend itself for the purpose Of man.
killing in war. That such a missile
is 0 powerful for long-range
shooting may be- true enough, says
the Regiment; but for destructive
purposes at a short distance a bullet
of paper or tallow has greater effect.
During some recent experiments in
this direction it was proved beyond
doubt that, whereas a metal bullet
penetrated a deal plank an inch in
thickness and left a neat hole, a
pasteboard bullet had a far greater
destructive effect upon the target. A
paper bullet passing through six
pieces of tin placed at a distance of
a foot apart buckled them up so as to
be Of no further use, whereas a metal
bullet merely left a small round hole
and in no other way disfgured the
tin.
The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1903-07-23
MR.. JENNINGS ROAD MAP.
incident Glowing Value Of a Careful
and Orderly Wife.

Mrs. Jennings was in the habit Of
keeping everything in order Tor her
husband, and he, like many another
equally fortunate man, says London
Tlt-Bits, took it as a matter Of course.
His letters and papers were always
arranged on his desk. his clean
clothes on a chair, his shirt studs in;
the proper place on his dressing table.
But vt Mr. N Jennings, instead of taking
these little services in grateful and
a%pppreciatiye fashion, was rather in
.clined to minimize their value. He
never liked to have them mentioned,
by his wife.
"l.don't know what you mean by
speaking as if | couldn't find things.
for myself, or:asi if you always had to-
look after them," he said one day in
an injured tone. "l'm perfectly ca
pable of looking after my belong
ings if you would only let them
alone"
Mrs. Jennings smiled a tranquil
but exasperating smile and said moth
ing.
"And you don't always put things
where they should go by any means,
my dear" said Mr.. Jennings, with in
creased emphasis. "You knew I
wished to start off early this after
noon for a 25-mile spin on my bicy-
Gle, and yet here is my road map on
your work table-without its cover,
too; you must have let the children
tear it. Well, I shall be back in time
for supper-and, with an air Of
triumph at this timely Illustration Of
his point. MIR. Jennings pocketed the
sheet Of thin paper, creased in many
folds, and stalked out.
Mrs. Jennings lips moved as if she
wre about to call after him, but she
merely smiled again. An hour later
Mr.. Jennings seated himself on a
shady bank ten miles from his home
and took out his road map, for he had
lost his way.
"What!" he exclaimed to the soli-
tude and an inquisitive squirrel.
"What!' For spread out upon his
knee was a paper, covered with trac-
lngs, to be sure, but not the kind he
was accustomed to, and having along
the lower edge the words, 'Seven-
gored skirt. Size RI. F~orty-two
inches!!"
The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1903-07-23
Food Experiments.

"Prof. Wiley is not the only per-
son who is conducting food expert
ments on human beings" remarked
a clerk of one of the uptown hotels to
a Washington Star reporter. "That
sort Of thing" he continued, "is done
at this hotel every day. Among our
guests is an attorney, an intelligent
and influential man, who halls from
a western city, and whoi is conducting
such experiments en- himself. Since
the warm weather set in this particu-
lar gentleman has bent his efforts
toward the discovery of a food which
will tend to reduce perspiration.
Strange to say, he has found the
much-sought-afte r nonperspiring ed
ible. His discovery is that by eating
sailed almonds after each meal that
lazy feeling which usually then takes
possession of a person can be easily
overcome and one can walk with per-
feet ease and as far as he chooses
without being covered with torrents
Of pegspirati0n" 49,, - ,
The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1903-07-23
TOO KNOWING.
The Boy Was Bright, But Failed ia
Get, Position.

Get Postum. 49,
A story is told Of a certain trades
nan whose premises were almost en-
tirely destroyed as the result Of a
mysterious fire, says London Tit
Bits.
The stock was fully insured, and
there was talk of arson. Proceedings
we're actually taken against the own
er of the business, but owing tolack
of evidence the prosecution fell
through.
Soon afterwards the shop was re-
opened with an entirely new stock,
and the tradesman advertised in the
local newspaper for anserrand boy
AImong he applicants for the post
was a bright youth who had.just left
school.
"Well, my boy" said the trades
man, sand what do you know?"
"Oh," was the cool response, 81
knows a lot. For one thing / knows
how to keep my mouth shut, an if
you're thinking Of having another
fare-up you'll find me as close as a
hoyster!!"
10 the youngsters surprise he
wasn't engaged.
The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1903-07-23

Don't be afraid to change your
mind -Atchison Globe.
Cnrtonn Sense Tint Giants Haxm.
Francis Darwin. speaking before tho
members of the British association az
GLASGOW, said that a pine tree grows
straight upward because it Possesses
o gravitation ense. A plant which
grows in a curve in order D assume tho
position best suited to it's needs also
exhibits a perception of gravitation.
Some fc~er stalks are very ~curiouslv
guided by the gravitation sense. The
common narcissus is an example, At
FIRST there is a straight shaft piercing
the ground with its compact pointed
fower-bud. But as the flower openo
the stalk bends close to the top and
brings the howcr-tube into a roughly
horizontal position. where it shows OFF
its brightly colored crown to the in
sects that visit it. The flowers are guild.
ed to the right position by the gravita.
ton sense, and they increase or dimin-
ish the angular bend in tbei-stalk til,
the right position is attained. Sod
elce.
The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1903-07-23
A LOSING GAME.
d0pise Reads Story Of an Agreement
with a Thief.

Ina collection Of ssstageland stor-
les Adolph Klauber, in the Phila-
delphia Ledger, has many interesting
yarns" by OF about persons connect
ed With the drama. He remarks that
Opie Read is a clearing house for
about all the stories ever told con-
corning the eastern Tennessee people
he has put in his character drama. 1t
will be recalled that the scene Of
"Tbe Starbucks" is placed in a
mountainous districty far from rail
roads, where the natives are as PRINT
tive and ingenious as a dramatist
might wish. Gone man down there
who may be said to be another Jasper
Starbuck." recounts Mr.. Read, chad
suffered for years through the activ-
ity Of a hog s%tealer named Jim Jack
son. Jim was known to be a thief,
but he was never caught, and, be-
sides, was SO much,o f acomedisn that
nobcdv'cared to prosecute him. Jas
per-if | can call him that-was
standing by the side Of his pen one
day surveying a particularly fine
lAqking lot Of hogs. jim Jackson
came along and his eyes glistened as
he saw the drove. Them air fine
hogs said Jasper. Never seed
BETTER allowed Jim. I'll tell YOU
what I'll do said Jasper. IF you'll
pick any two you can have 'em per-
yidin' you let the lest alone AL
right, Jasper says jim. You've
been a mighty good neighbor, and
I'll agree to it, but I'll shore lose
meat"
The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1903-07-23
FOR SALE

An A No. l Threshing outfit,
comprised of a Gaar Scott rs
horse engine. Never a better
engine ever brought to Dakota.
A SO Avery separator, a Fosston
wind stacker, Perfection weigh
er and self feeder. There is
nothing better to go into a field
of grain with. 1t just about runs
with no expense. Also a good big
boarding car, a frstclass sleep
car, water tanks. pumps and hose
pipes. All new and everything
in good order. Will sell cheap
and give long time. Will find
you threshisg as payment. Age
and sickness sole reason for sell
ing. Apply to James A. Day,
sec. 26-145-57, Riverside town
hip, 7 miles ives: of Hope. loft
The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1903-07-23
HADN'T ENLISTED AS A BIRD.
Lrishman Puts in a Protest Against
Soldering in Tree-Tops.

Soldering in Tree-Tops.
Maj. Waller, Of the United States
Marine corps, tells a good story illus
trating the wit of.one Of the marines
under his command in Samar, says
the Washington Star. This particu-
lar marine was an Irishman, who
never failed to have an apt reply
ready for any occasion. The marines
we're cutting their way through some
very tough underground, which
called into play all the athletic train
ing Of the Americans. The marine
in his endeayors to get through the
underground had been executing a
series Of evolutions never met with
under any other conditions. Finally,
as there were suspicious noises ahead,
Maj. Waller ordered him to climb a
tree and see if he could make out
anything ahead. This order was
complied with, but not without a pro-
test.
81 don't mind enlisting for a
Rocky mountain goat" protested the
marine, @but I'll be dumbed if I
thought was enlistingfor bird"
But he flew up the tree as readily
as if he had wings, and was soon
down again to report what he had
seen ip bis flying tsip, --,4~~niI
The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1903-07-23
GRANDMA CARR DISHES.
Many Claimants for China Buried
Hundred Years Ago.

4sF9s.Sd SASOs
Here's a pretty question for the
lawyers: A hundred years or more
ago some valuable china dishes were
buried by a family in what is now Of
.ssee'ggo county. The land passed into
other hands, and in the course of
time-afew weeks ago-afa farm hand,
plowing in the field, found the pre-
cious relics. Many were broken by
the plow, but a great many were
saved, and, they are valuable, for col
lectors of old china are anxious to
get hold Of this particular collection.
But the trouble is, says the Utica
Observer, that there are many claim
ants for the china. First, there is the
hired man who was holding the pillow
which uncovered the arr old relics.
On the principle that the finder is
first owner, the dishes belong to him.
Then there is the man who rented
the farm, and for whom the discov-
e,re.r was working. On the principle
that the servants time belongs to his
employer, and also that he is entitled
to whatever the farm produces, the
dishes belong to him.
But along comes the man who
owns the farm, and who rented it to
the man who hired the chap who
made the discovery, and he claims
ownership Of the dishes because he
is the owner Of the farm, and while
the lessee is entitled to the crops he
has no claim to what may be pro-
duced from underground. The
fourth claimant is to be found in an
heir Tor heirs) Of the Cars, who bur
led the dishes. 1t is presumed that
they will find difficulty in setting up
q claim, for it will not be Easy to
prove that these were the dishes
Grandma Carr took such peculiar
care Of, and SO the other claimants
may tell them to go to and provetitle.
1T is also suggested that the state
may get a hand in the muddle, onthc
ground that the unclaimed property
of deceased persons reverts to the
commonwealth, thus making a fifth
claimant for the coveted platters,
plates, tureens ad teacups.
The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1903-07-23
AN ACTRESS TAMES A MOUSE.
While an Invalid at Indianapolis She
So Amuses Herself.

Miss Flora Mitchell, an actress,
who has been confined to the Home
hospital in Marion, where She
has been an invalid for five weeks,
says the indianapolis News, has
tanned a mouse. For more than a
week the mouse has been almost a
constant companion Of the actress,
who says that it has greatly helped
her to preserve her c%heerfulness.
The first week Miss Mitchell was
confined to her room, she noticed the
occasional presence Of the animal,
and being lonely began to lay bread
crumbs an3 other mouse food where
it would be handy for the little crea-
ture. Soon it became holder and after
a few days it would come near the
bed and eat the mites of bread and
meat almost as soon as they were
dropped by the hands Of the sick
woman.
She gradually began to reach to-
ward the animal until finally she
touched it and.stroked its furry coat.
It has never shown the least fear,
and about a week ago Miss Mitchell
picked it up and allowed it to u at
will over her hands and lap. From
that time she has not had the least
trouble in picking it up. In fact, it
will run toward her and seems to
delight in being fondled. 1t makes
not attempt to bite her, but when
others attempt to fondle it there is
trouble at once.
The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1903-07-23
AT THE DOCK.
Jim and His London Trousers On the
Incoming Liner.

luComluS AlneIs f
Amusing incidents are common at
the New York piers when the big linz
ers sail or whent they warp into their
berths after a voyage. The Post re-
cords one that happened;atthe White
Star dock the other day. a well.
dressed youth with an imperturbable
countenance sat on a pile watchingga
steamer drawing uptot the pier. Sud
denly he threw his head back and.
yelled: "Oh-h-h, jim" Noresponse
from the crowded decks. Again he
walled: eli! JIM Thent the crowd
on the dock took It up and yearned
aloudfo Slim to the immense graf
ifcation Of the people on the ship as
well as on the pier. Finally a. red
faced young man pushed his way
through the crowd on deck and
leaned owe the rail. He regarded
the young man on the stringpiece in.
anger and affection. "Bill, you In
dian, what do you want:?' The young
man breathed a sigh Of holy calm and
peace. "Jim," he said, you're look
ing great. I'll leave it to the crowd"
He turned to those behind him.
Jim went over to get some Of those
London trousers, the loose, baggy
sort, y'know," he explained, casually.
Jim turned a bright turkey red, and
was vainly endeavoring to worm his
way back to obscurity, but the pas
sengers on deck had got interested
and would not allow it. "Show us
your pants, JIM" yelled a. man on
the pier, and the crowd took up the
cry. The tormentors did not stop
until the ship had locked.
The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1903-07-23
N ONCE MORE"
How a Busy Merchant Discouraged q
Persistent Agent.

How a Busy Merchant Discouraged a
Persistent Agent.
A certain busy merchant, almost
worried to death by the persistent at
tentions of a local insurance agent,
suddenly wheeled round in his chair
and demanded:
els your life insurcd?"
"Of course, sir!'
"In the case of your death who ben
eits?"
"My wife, sir!"
"H'm! Send your wife to me."
Rather puzzled, the agent with
drew, but being a nan who did not
stick. at trifes, says London Tit-Bits,
lie prevailed on his wife to call on tho
merchant, who was sure, he said, to
"do something big in the end"
"Mrs. T." remarked the mer-
chant when the lady called, II under
stand your husbands life is insured?"
'"That is So"
"And that you would be entitled to
claim in the event ofhis death?"
HCertainly."
"Thcn, madam, if you can prevail
upon your husband to visit me once
more-only once, mind-IIl see that
you don't have long to wait for your
money! That's all. Good morn
ing"
" J:J1
The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1903-07-23
~EXTRAVAGANT MAN.
Now He Knows It Never Pays to
Argue with q Woman.

Itdoesn't pay to argue with a wom-
an. The other night, whenI arrived
at home, said a gentleman to a New
York Times reporter, / found that
my wife had bought a new hat which,
might have fitted her head all right,
but which was several sizes toolurge
for my pocketbook. Ny previous ex-
periiences should have taught me Wis
dom; taught me better than to dis
cuss the matter. but the trials Of
that days business had made me ir-
ritable, and I fel. like complaining
about something, and SO | naturally
complained Of my wife's extravaganza.
She answered the charge by saying:
"1ou mel are always charging us
cme with extravaganza, but you
never seem to think Of yourown fail
ings in that line
Il don't know what you mean," 1
replied.
"Well, III tell YOU. You men run
this great and glorious country and
you always have, and you are there
fore responsible fer all its weak
nesses. Now, what salary doyou men
pay the vice president Of the United
States?"
"He receives SIS, 600 year"
who is the vice president ncw:?"
"Well, there isn't any"
Every good. There hasn't been
any since President Mckinley was
killed, has there!!o
"Well, no,"I admitted. reluctantly,
because I could see that my better
half had been reading political sci
ence for a purpose and that that pur-
pose was to get the better Of me.
"There hasn't been any vice prei-
dent for a year or two, them"
[ was forced to admit that such
was the fact.
"And the country seems to get
along all right without cne:?"
"But the president might die"
STo be sure, but the law places
others in the line Of succession, so
that there wouldn't be any real va
. cancy, doesn't it:?"
! eyes, Of course, but"
:'There are no 'buts'about it; YOU
pay a maj $S,CC0 a year to hang
around and do nothing but wait for
another man to die, which happens
perhaps once in a generation. Now,
is that business sense Or needless ex-
travagance?"
I didn't know what to say and SO
said nothing, and my wife continued
to hit a'msn when hd was down, a
very unsportsmanlike and very sports
womanlike act on her part.
eyes, you men pay'a nan $4,000
a year for doing nothing and then
make a big fuss because a woman pays
a few paltry dollars fos a new hat.
You mel pay $4,000 for}nothing and
complain if a woman pays s25 for
something. Now will YOU tell ne"
But I didn't wait to hcar the SEN
tence finished. because, as | said at
the start, it doesn't pay TO argue with
O woman.
The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1903-07-23
THE
MilW Road
TO
Milwaukee and Chicago.

No. 8.
Day Express-Leaves the Twin
Cities every morning. The Mis-
siSsippi River, the Dells of the
Wisconsin River and the Wiscon-
sin Resorts in daylight-Milwau-
kee at 700 P. NJ. and Chicago at
1925 P. M. Buffet arlor Cars and
Dining Cars. Electric lighted train.
No. 2.
Night Express ~ Leaves the
Twin Cities in vhe early evening,
arrives Chicago at 700 \. NJ, in
timefor eastern connecting trains.
Electric lighted, Dining Cars and
Sleeping Cars.
NO. a.
The Pioneer Limited-Costliest
and handsomest train in the world,
leaves the Twin Cities later in the
evening, arrives Chicago 9::30A.M.
Has Buffet Library Cars, Compart-
ment Cars, Standard Sleepers and
Dining Cars train that has
no equal in the world. Its fame
reaches around the globe. &c
trio lighted train.
Ask your nearest ticke, agent
for through tickets and baggage
checks via the Chicago, Milwaukee
& st. Paul Ry., or for maps, time
tables or INSTRUMENTATION, address
W. B. DIXON,
E~oTthrestern Passenger Agent,
ST.PAUL, MINI.
The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1903-07-23

When you are hungry don't
forget the Palace Restaurant.
The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1903-07-23
didn't call again.
Do It as Often as Necessary.

Don't be afraid to change your
mind -Atchison Globe.
The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1903-07-23

m of H.-ChampiOn Lodge Degree of Honor.
E1a No. LOG. Meets 1St and 3rd Saturday eve
ming of each month. Visiting members well
come. MISS AGATHA VADNIE. G.. of H.
Mrs. FRANCES STILES. Recorder.
The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1903-07-23

NEOMEN-Hope Homestead No. 24s-BroCher-
y hood of American YeOmen. Meets first
Monday In each month. All visiting Yeomen
Welcome. A. NJ. McLAUttHLIN. FOrman.
W. Z. BOISE. Cor.
The Owosso times. (Owosso, Mich.) 1897-1926, 1903-03-06
An Important Circular.

Visitors to Cairo will be interested in
the following circular which was re-
Gently published in the popular Egyp-
tan winter resort: Attention! Atten-
ton! We inform that tomorrow-that
Is to say, Saturday, the 18th inst.-will
be open precisely to Ezbekieh street,
opposite Royal Hotel, a men eating
house named the Restaurant of Lon
don which resplended of purity joined
in good conteny and purity Of prod
ucts. We invite the wine tasters that
we don't mistake that they will be as
sure Of our speeches thuthfulness con-
vinced by the estimation Of every our
who shall visit our establishment. For
much assure the public we offer 100
sovereigns to every one who shall set
tie that our products are adulterate,
and that our Kitchens, materials are
dirty. To auspices like this we proceed
courageously to the open calling to the
production of good wine tasters."
The Owosso times. (Owosso, Mich.) 1897-1926, 1903-03-06
HUMOR OF THE HOUR
Badly wanted.

Sag Skidmore had been "sparkip'
Susie Jane for nearly three years with
out coming to the point. At last Susie
grew weary of waiting.
"Sag," she said, 81 want ter know
now pint blank are yo' goin to hev me
or not?"
"W-e-l-l. dunno" Sag trawled.
Sometimes I think l will, Ell ag'in l
think won't"
Nov, whit do yo' see about me yo'
don't like?'
"Well, I dunno. Some say yo're a
mite nearsighted."
"Who seq that? Jest tell me who
SEE it."
"Well, Lily Hooper SEE it,"
"She does, does she? En- she CANT
see ter thread needle. Wy, | could
see the eye Of it plumb out ter tibet
gate"
''Wel], it's gettin' purity dark. Susie
Jane. en- yo'd hardly hev fair show
in, but gimme needle, Ell I'll jest
try yo'."
Sag moved slowly out to the gate
and went through the motion of stick
ing the needle in the top of the post.
He stepped back and hallooed, "All
ready, Susie Jane"
Susie Jane stood on the doorstep.
She bent forward, stopped right, then
left, raised OH her tiptoes and appeared
to be striving for sight of the needles
eye.
comm through" she said at last.
"Susie Jane" drawled Sag, coming
forward, "there amt no needle thar.
but eff yo' want me bad ernough to look
hole through tibet pin stuck up In
the gatepost reckon, by jings, I'll hev
yo'."-Harper's Magazine.