West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1903-03-26
Pays Ills Respects To Politics and the
Politicians Generally.

''~NN Hi'h' w. "a nafch ~ -oofnc
of your readers may know Colonel Blunt
personally, -some may not You have
missed whole lot II you don, know him.
No one knows how he got the lille of
Colonel" lie stayed at home and
guarded the women and children while his
neighbor men went out to save the nation.
in the sixties. So /, Is not "war title. -
He had II before the Spanish war broke
out, and he was pas, the age limit anyhow
But he's Colonel 10 anybody and everybody.
II you fail TO address him by his tile YOU
make an everlasting enemy of Colonel
Blunt. He is sage, philosopher. wit, SER
monzer and moralist all in one. Describe
him That's impossible. Your CORE
spondent has been keeping tab on tue
Colonel for weeks and will follow him close
and in subsequent letters perhaps he will be
revealed by his own sayings as quoted,
more clearly than by any description / can
give. But here's for a try, anyhow, on a
brief outline of the old Colonel. So far as
know he has always lived in old Preston
lie has wife and several grown children,
The latter all living in the west. Colonel
Blunt Is well up in years, has plenty TO live
on and takes deep interest in politics and
public matters. lie takes two county papers.
the Farm and Preside, a Pittsburg daily
and the journal and Messenger. It's a
cinch, he's Baptist, although he don't
always sick to the water-wagon and some
say he keeps "barl' Of 10 year old rye in
his cellar for sickness" He can't be well
much OF the time, then, for every time your
correspondent has seen him his breath
smelled like the old "Shinbone" stilI-house
down In Grant district. Colonel Blunt is
fat, short and red-faced. He smokes a
strong black pipe continuously and talks
with drnwl, sappng his knee with his
hand TO emphasize Ms points. He rides
horseback bad weather and other times
drives big white horse he calls "Arab. y
hitehed to Cart. II has always been his
delight TO go from one part of the county to
another and visit his acquaintance, learn
the news, talk politics and swap yarns. I
saw the Colonel in Kingwood last Saturday.
lie was loShng in certain store aad was as
talka,ive as parrot.
Colonel, how are you p
cable to he up and have my bed made"
he tarily replied. Flows yourself 2"
"Some old one, two three" | told him.
Colonel, what's new with you ?"
fsNnf gnet.tanr ,k;...
putting away On his old back pipe. "Plen,y
Ia eat, something 10 rink aud coal to burn.
a Teller oughinl to coml'lMa at that, hey ?
Was just ialkin' 10 these gentlemen here
about this here wireless biography, > said
Colonel Blunt pointing TO his friends sitting
abouI The burnside stove recognized in
the group Jack Brown, John Garner, Gus
Cresap, Leroy Shaw, John Listou, Peter X.
Smith aud few other Kingwoodi,cs, also a
visitor or so 10 town, namely DR.. Cole
Tiichenell and Charley Wolfe the Tunnel,on
Regulator. The Colonel continued: .srbey
have horseless- wagon, cowless. milk, hair.
less men, brainless-women and wireless.
Telegraph Gosh hain't any idec wha.
next they will spring on US American CHI
zens. Tell you, be hanged, what I'd like
to see. that is as follows, namely, viz !:
Boodless legisga''r $, priceless liquor and
taSless-sheras Them would I've improve
menis worth lalkin' about ("
''Whai do you mean about .boodless
legislaturesI' asked the Colonel
''You know, man, jes' as we'll as I do.
Why hain't ye read the reports from Charles.
ton They spent more money down there
buying up votes fer and against certain bills
than is spent for public schools in this here
county in year. Darned if it amt fact.
They do say they shut off the water from
the city SOS the Legislators wuz forced to
drink beer and licker. Co'se I haint a
strict 'prohib, but we all knows a Teller
can't vote quite as Intellectually when he's
half-shot as when he's at himself. See 2"
Colonel, suppose you were member
Of the county court aud there was propo.
s,ion up TO grant valuable franchise to
some big corporation. Suppose, Colonel,
Il was tic, and your vote would decide il
one way oranoiher. Suppose again, Colonel,
that some dark night while court was in
session. about the time you we're goin' down
the dark street to your hotel, somebody
would stop you"
'I'd yell for the police" the Colonel
said exeiIedly, as he became interested in
what said.
"liold on. Col. Blunt, wal, until finish.
Don't interrupt me. Suppose, as I said,
some person stopped you"
''Man or woman p interrupted the
Colonel, exci,edly
"Why man, Of course. know YOU
wouldn't call the police Il a woman stopped
you in lonely dark spot. Suppose this
man pu, roll Of grecnb,cks in your arms
as big as two months old baby, and say.
ing "voie 'igh, Col mel Blunt" and then
walked of leaving he big bunch Of money
IN your possession. what would you do,
Colonel, in case like that D.
BY this time Col. Bunt's eyes were
bullying ont ills face was ,urkey. gobbier
red. lie was leaning forward eagerly asif
he expected me 10 hand him a wad Of bills.
Then, relghdng his pipe he relaxed snd
replied
"Boys, I'm human. This gentleman
almost made b1cksiider OUT Of me tcllin'
about that bunch Of money IN my arms.
] could almos, feel It layin there. Bot,
gents, ibis is what I'd do. world take
that roll Of bills right straight 10 bank.
OF course not KNOWN who give IL TO me. !
couldn't return t I'd take Ito the Terra
Ala Bank, too, fer I'd be afeared this gosh
dang kingwood sing would swipe d, by some
hook 81 crook. Then ia 60 into court and
say Fellow commissioners an awful
crime has been pefpeirated. An soc,,,,t h..