davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1903-07-29
Gees to Columbia.

Il. I'll. MoMaster, who for nearly
eight years has been manager Of the
Charleston Post and has recently bs-
come circulation manager of the Co
lumbia State, can do more on the
"busioess end" of a newspaper than
any man in South Caroiina. In thor
ough mastery OF the details of a news
paper business office, he has no equal
that W. know of In South Carolina and
the newspaper TO which MIR. McMas-
ter now goes will have no man in any
way connected with its staff more
valuable to it.
Nels0n Miles, commanding general
of the army, is to be retired next week.
The army has already been retired
from Miles.
The Charleston News and Courier
still insists that Charleston is q cool
town In summer. Nevertheless, the
News and Courier is itself a warm
baby"
Mr.. Bryan has another ground for
charging Mr. Cleveland with being a
Republican sympathizsr. Mr.. Cleve-
land is with Roosevelt on the trace
suicide issue.
After all, Missouri Is one state IN
which o politician cannot steal with
impmnlty.
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1903-07-29
CHAPTER XVIII.

81 AZ 81 81 AZ 81 n e 81 g 81 * 81 & ~ 3: e * Il n }
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1903-07-29

'tuETfIER ornot Brandon would
have found some way to de-
Il liver the princess safely home
y and still make his escape l
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1903-04-09

then after ten days lying and
begging and sweating, I'll maybe
sell $500 worth at sixty days less
2 per cent and then go further
South and do worse" We SYM
pathised with the Legitimate but
the drinks were plainly on him
and he confessed the justice of il.
On the way out of the bar, l
said: "Well, what's your line?''
''Hush," he said, "that's bluff. I
have no more samples than a rab-
bit. I'm selling whisky out of
Louisville" It was too good a
secret to keep, 80 after the others
were told, we asked him why he
allowed himself to get stuck for
the drinks. cts this way he
replied: 'My firm wants to sell
whisky in this town; I spend about
S. day to advertise our brand in
a practical way That's why I
called for the Blank Brand. That
bartender will haze to buy if you
fellows stay here long enough and
will call for Blank always" Prov
ing that one-half the world does
not know how the other half has
to hustle to make living-am I
right? HARLEY.
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1903-04-09
A LITTLE SPOILSPORT.

CONTINUED from page three.)
l have never listened to in all my cen.
turtles of existence. To thus jest with
the most sacred of all gifts from our
Great Father, is to invite millions of
ages in obscurity and pennance.
And why should not tell him? Ills
our duty, as you know. in this existence
to better the dispositions of mankind
in our small way, heal envy and bitter
psngs with our fragrance and with
our simple beauty teach the Creators
lesson, that through earthly life and
death only, man is made cognizant of
the process towards immortal life. We
bloom and wither every year (unless
we have some extreme sin.to atone for
like the heartless flirt in the thistle)
and thus every year we come nearer
that perfect state, where we bloom for
ever in transparent truth by the throne
of the Immortal Eye. We are babe to
convey the idea of the highest con-
ceivable spiritual attainment, to i'm
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1903-04-09
Sample Cases.

[ was glad to get wire one
day, shortly after dining at Ben
sons, which read, $50 to Memphis
and wire your arrival" It was
good to get back to trolley cars
after being several weeks among
the merry farmers. Memphis
looked the most enterprising city
I found in all the South. In COM
parison, I mean, with other South
ern cities. The retail stores were
lighted by electricity and were we'll
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1903-04-09

press the necessity of passing beyond
humanity, to gain level of peace,
bliss above earthly comprehension
other words, to reach Nirvana.
Shortly before noon servant came
for me, took me to the carriage and
after quite drive came to. my new
home. My new master himself met me
at the door. He put me on small table
and sat down alongside and then told
him the whole shameful story. He sat
silent a long time. Not sign did he
display of his great sorrow, except two
tears that came peeping out timidly,
but l know what he went through. He
was brave knight to be enrolled
under-I would more were like him.
He kissed me tenderly and called me
his little pagan spoilsport, saying:
"My love has not been wasted after all,
for thou wilt appreciate and return it!'
Soon his eyes blazed with scOrn as he
muttered: "Dost dig pitfalls for othersl
Verify thou canst be paid in thy own
coin! The tables turned, and thou
knowest not I know. Perhaps thy
pride will wilter." He wrote some
thing on his card, showed it to me, and
put it in his cardcase He then sent
for his little sister and told her he was
going away for few months; to tell
his man to pack his things and get
everything ready, and then he begged
her to take particularly good care Of
me till he came back. At the ap-
pointed time he called on my former
mistress, sent in his card, and then
went out Immediately. l could imag-
inc them in the window looking for
him and their hasty retreat to the con-
servatory on beholding his approach.
After his return, and when we were
alone, he brought out pistol to put it
in good order In case he should need it.
It contained one cartridge and as he
took it out, it slipped from his fingers,
fell head-on on nail and exploded! In
trying to grasp it he bent forward and
the bullet struck him square in the
forehead. He sank to the floor signing:
Goods pity-an accidentl Gala! bear
witness twas not my will and-and-
fare-thee-wellw I turned faint with hor-
ror. For hours knew nothing save the
vacuum he left; he my friend, my
Xenes! The mystery was never solved,
for l could not volunteer my testimony
without exposing the whole vile affair,
and thus leaving blot on his sacred
name.
You may be sure "my lady" did not
show his card to her chums, as on it
was written in a strong hand: "April
Fool!" ABA DAB
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1903-04-09
THE JOYS OF PRINTERS.


composition in setting up the toast,
Woman! without her, man would
be savage" put the comma in
the wrong place, and made the
sentence read, woman without
her man, would be a savage"
Another compositor, who was
acuated by different motives than
the one who punctuated the above
sentence, is said to have punctuated
a well-known proverb of Solomon
thus: "The wicked fee, when no
man pursueth the righteous, is
bold as a lion" This was merely
the product of a budding wit, and
was less excusable than the blum
der of an English journal which
stated that the Russian General
Backinoffkowsky was found dead
with long word in his mouth
Some years ago a celebrated
speaker had occasion to telegraph
across the English Channel on the
subject of proposed lecture by
him in Westminster Abby. The
subject, as written by him, was,
"The Influence of Rome on the
Formation of Christianity" It
was announced in England as "The
Influence of Rum on the Diges-
ton of Humanity"
While reading some of the above
mistakes that have appeared in
print the discerning ones can
easily estimate the part the type
settlers played in deftly adjusting
the types in order to produce
startling effects. When the editor
plainly wrote ''metal pegs" in his
article dealing with a scientific
subject how his eyes must have
stuck out when he returned the
following day and found that it
had been changed to read mental
legs" With what ghoulish glee
the humorous composition must
have contemplated his little joke.
But as the editor rushes into the
composing room and asks who set
up that particular article, his
smile begins to narrow down at
the corners.
"Who set this up?" he shouts
in laundering tones.
Il did, SIR meekly replies slug
No. 3, who is beginning to feel as
tho a coal stove was perched on
his head.
"Look at that, sir! Does metal
pegs spell mental legsY' he
roared, sticking the paper under
poor No. SIS nose, with his pom
derous thumb on the offending
words.
The committal Of such Jokes is
proverbial with printers, and they
would make interesting reading if
collected together. Some printers
can no more avoid making them
than cat can stop catching mice.
OF course the proof readers might
have discovered them, but they
occasionally nod their head-they
are not infallible by any means,
as some worldly-minded writer's
suppose.
These alleged jokes sometimes
prove costly affairs. In fact whole
editions have been destroyed on
account of them. But the humor-
GUS typo, is prone to have his fun,
even tho he is now and then landed
into the street for presuming to
play them under the editors very
nose. s..
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1903-04-09

tSI 6u1lt0 LILO Oy % uhsAA
they rest on the proof reader, and
he, in turn, looks at the door lead
ing to the composing room. After
the editor mas run out of adjectives
and hot air, he is willing to listen
to any explanations which the
printer might offer. If he is wise
he will avoid offering any of those
hacknied excuses, such as being
in hurry, interrupted by other
pressing work, not feeling we'll.
etc. Your wise printer knows
better than that. He points to
the copy hook and dramatically
exclaims: "There, sir, is my apol-
ogy!'
Errors are bound to appear in
print. Ninety nine times out OF a
hundred these errors can be at
tributed to hastily written manu-
script. The spectacle these errors
present would be laughable if they
were not 60 tragical. The trans
position or omission of a single
letter often changes the meaning
of whole sentence.
While it is self-evident fact
that many glarirg errors which
appear in print are due to the
sportive mood of some printer,
many of them are wholly uninten-
tional, Notwithstanding the scru-
pulous care of editors and proof
readers to eliminate them. The
following are collection of errors
which demonstrate how easily
printers can change the meaning
of sentence by dropping single
letter, or mistaking the meaning of
a word on account of bad writing.
We claim no originality in their
production, but offer them just as
they are:
Some years ago an eastern editor
undertook to compliment an emil
nent citizen as "a noble old burgh-
or, proudly loving his native state;;"
but the neatly turned compliment
came from the compositor's hands
"a hobby old burglar, prowling
round in a naked state" It is
needless to say that the fun-loving
composition lost no time in getting
through the back door on the
editors appearance in the compos-
ing room.
Perhaps the most fearful error
of the press that ever occurred
was caused by the letter &c" drop
ping out of the following passage
in a "form'' Of the Book of Com
mon Prayer: eve shall all be
changed in the twinkling of an
eye" When the book appeared,
the passage, to the horror of the
devout reader, was thus printed:
"We shall all be hanged in the
twinkling of an eye.''
In writing up an alleged swell
society function the reporter re-
ferred to one of the ladies, with
whom he was personally acquaint-
ed, by saying: "Her cupid's
mouth looked bewitchingly beau
tiful as she modestly chewed her
gum" But when he perused the
paper the next morning and saw
that the word "gum" had been
changed to "rum," it is said the
composition required medical at
tention for some days before being
able to get around and collect his
salary.
In the London Christian World,
in 1888, writer, referring to an
address at Christ Church by the
Rev. Theodore Hookes represents
him as saying that some of the
clergy had gone back "to the black
lie of their boyhood," instead of
black tie.
Mistakes in punctuation, such
as the omission or misplacing of a
comma. sometimes greatly change
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1903-04-09

filled With prosperous looking
shoppers. / had occasion to pur-
chase few articles and entered q
good sized department store.
While waiting for my chance, !
said to the clerk: 81 don't see
how you can run this store without
any young lady clerks" swell,
sah,' he replied they all speak
with that delightful Southern &C
cent?. "Well, sab, you see the
young ladies down here are very
choice about employment and none
of the genuine Southerners allow
their daughters to work. Now
and them" he continued, "a young
lady may be a bookkeeper, but as
for going in store, or to do mill
work, not much, no sab, only the
poor whites do that" We talked
few minutes more and at part
ing he said he would be glad to
meet me after business hours and
go to the theatre, for he said fine
show was in town. On inquiry I
found the "fine show" to be the
London Bellies" and so I plead a
former engagement. I merely
mention this to show how hospita-
BILE the Southerners are to entire
strangers. Imagine a clerk at
Heigel Shoppers at Chicago in
viting stranger to show!
After supper I sat in the lob.
by and soon recognized several
travelling men. Not that l knew
them. but there is something about
a travelling man by which he is
easily known. As we sat smoking
one man nodded to me and said,
"Out of St. LOUISE" "No, Gin
cinnati," I replied. "Oh yes, Gin
cinnati. Great town. Always
liked it. Good hotels there" etc.,
etc. Another man Clipped in and
soon, four or five were in a gener-
al conversation.
Said No. L: "Bet [ am the only
man in the bunch that doesn't
carry samples!' "Bet you amt"
said I. whats your liner" he
asked. Fruit and produce" SWELL,
that's good.'
No. 2 spoke up: eyes, he's not
the only one without samples, for
I don't carry any either" "What
do you handler" asked No. l.
"Tacks," said No. 2. ''Tacksp' we
cried in chorus. eyes, tacks,"
said No. 2. "And all the sample
I carry is this card" Here he
showed printed card with sizes
and grades of tacks.
No. 3 then got mixed up in the
game. "Gentlemen,' he said, II
am a drummer, too, but no one
likes my business except my
customer. His customers hate my
line, in fact would rather buy any,
thing else than my goods, but
they buy 'em just the Same and 1
don't carry any samples either"
This was getting interesting. "And
you sell what?" we asked. No. 3
produced as fine a lot of photo
graphs of collins and shrouds as
I've seen in many a day.
"But," I said to No. l, ''you
have gotten us to tell all we know;
how about YOURSELF" "Well,"
said he, Give got you all skinned,
as the saying goes, for I carry no
samples of any kind whatever, and
furthermore if make one sale in
six months my firm is satisfied.
Guess what I sell!' Well we did
guess. One guessed, "Air ships?"
"No, not that" said No. 1. "Opera
Houses?" said another. "No."
"Churches?" mo" ooh you
can't guess, said No. l. II sell
steel bridges!" "Well," pipes up
a little fellow who had not spoken
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1903-04-09

HEN an author dis
covers a malignant err
ror in his work he in
stantly lays the blame
on hispublisher; the lat
tershifts his ewes until
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1903-04-09

Continued from page three.)
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1903-02-21
PERSONAL MENTION

Mr.. George Bowman spent the day In
Gilman on business.
Mr.. j. d. Hunter, of Eldora, was IN
the city Friday on business.
Mr.. w. I. Smith left for Chicago
Friday evening for few days stay on
business.
Editor w. N. Thompson, of the Mon
tour Courier, was in the city on busi-
ness Friday.
Mr.. C. b. Mason. of State Center, was
lin the Friday afternoon looking after
business matters.
Miss Lottie Brand returned Friday
evening from Gilman, where she has
been for brief visit with friends.
Rev. Frank Wheeler and wife. OF
Marion township. who have been
spending the past month in Los An
geles. Pasadena, Riverside, the Catalina
Islands and other California points
have arrived home.
Mr.. Fletcher Mead. who is a student
at Iowa College, was in the city over
night Friday with his parents, Mr.. and
Mrs. E. r. Mead, goin;5 to Waterloo
this morning, where he will remain for
a brief visit with his brother, Mr.. AL
bert Mead, who is employed as a teach
er in that city.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1903-02-21
TO ALL cATARRH SUFFERERS.
Hyomei Guaranteed to Cure by Nc
Bride & Will or Money Refunded.

The popularity and Increase IN the
sales of Hyomei are UNIQUE In the an
mails Of medicine. Such astonishing
cures have been made by this remark
able remedy that the proprietors have
authorized Mcbride & Will to sell
every package of Hyomei under an
absolute guarantee that it will cure ca
tarrh. II it does not the purchaser
can have his money refunded by NC
Bride & Will.
Hyomei is no ordinary remedy. 1t is
the only method of treatment that
sends by direct inhalation to the most
remote part of the air passages bal
samic air that destroys all catarrhal
germs in the breathing organs. en-
riches and purifies the blood with adj
ditional ozone and makes permanent
and complete cures of catarrh.
The complete Hyomei outfit costs bu'
81 and consists of pocket inhaler that
can be easily carried in the vest pocket,
a medicine dropper and bottle OF
HyomeI sufficient for more than a
months treatment.
Breathe thru the inhaler for few
minutes four times a day and your
catarrh is cured. That's all.
If not cured Mcbride s. Will Will re-
fund your money.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1903-02-21

day school at 2:30 p. m. Evening serv-
ices at 1880. Rev. X. Michels, pastor.
/ The First Spirituaiist Society OF
/ Marshalltown, corner of Church street
and Second avenue-Services Sunday
morning at 1O;30 and evening at 7:3e
United Evangelical church, corner OF
Arson and Mitchell streets--Preachins
at II a. m. and 730 p. M. conducted by
the pastor. Sunday school a 10 a. M,
K. L. c. e. at s.: 80 p. m. S. Skogsberg,
pastor.
/ Salvation Army-Services In hall
over No. 16 South First avenue.
! Holiness meeting at IL a. m.
Praise service at p. M: free and easy
meeting at s p. m. Services every
weekday evening except Monday.
ST. Mary's. corner First and Linn
| streets-First mass, 8 a. M: high mass,
| 1890 a. M; Sunday school, p. M; yes
rers and benediction of the blessed sac
rament p m. All are welcome. M. c.
Lehman, rector.
st. Paul's Episcopal church, North
| Center between State and Grant-Holy
communion at 1880 =. m, morning pray
err at GAS, holy communion and sermon
mon at 1880. Sunday school immedl-
ately after the morning sermon. Will
lam Pence James. rector
| Elm Norwegian Lutheran church.
West Church street, between Third ana
Fourth-Services at 7:45 p. m. Sunday
school at H. NJ. Londahl. pastor; resi-
dence 30S North Fifth street.
Congregational church. corner First
and Church street-Patriotic service
| in the morning at 1880 conducted py
the pastor Evening service at l:oo.
Sunday school at noon; Y. p. S. c. n. at
5 D. M: midweek meeting thursdays
at 1880 %. m. Rev A. w. Sinden, pastor.
Christian church, corner Of Third and
Church street, Rev. w. II. Scott pastor
| Services at 1890 a. m. and In the eV-
ening at 1880. Sunday school at IL M,
and Y. p. S. G. f. at $50 p m.
Friends church, corner OF Main and
Third streets-Services Sunday at 1890
a. m, and 7:30 p. m. Sunday school at
| IL m, midweek prayer meeting Thurs
| day evening at 1880. Christian En-
deavor prayer meeting at $3.50. ELL
son r. Purdy, pastor.
First BaptlSC sCnurCH, SuuICH stieSs
between First avenue and Center
Services morning at 10:30 and evening
at 1880; B. Y. P. U. at $3.50; Junior
b. Y. p. u. at p. m,
midweek meeting Thursdays at 1880.
Strangers made welcome. Elijah
| Brown Jones, d. d. Pastor.
First Colored Baptist church-East
Bromley street, between Sixth and Sew
enth Misunderstanding at II o'clock
a. IN. and Z: 80 p. M; Sunday school at
1890; preaching and tribes meeting at
1880 p. m. Friday. Rev. w. T. Nicker-
son. pastor.
4 Swedish Lutheran church. corner OF
Third and Church streets, Rev. c. "A.
Lindvall, pastor-Services every Sun
day at 1920 am. and 1880 p. m.Sunday
school at IL m. Thursday evening
meeting at 1880 o'clock. All are well
come.
| First Methodist church, corner OF
Main and Second streets-Rev. f. NJ.
Coleman, d. D.. pastor-Services at
1890 a. m. and 1899 p. m. Sunday
school at IL m. Epworth League at
6:15 p. m.
Railroad Y. NJ. c. A.-meeting for
men at o'clock, conducted by Profess
sor j. p. Huggett. of the State Univer-
sity of Iowa.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1903-02-21
DR.. Phelps, opthalmologist
DR.. Rullard, osteopath. % East Mai

See Patrick for instruction on man
dolin, guitar or banjo. Studio, 80
North Center street.
! If not already our customer we In
wife you to try box of kemble's
flowers. They will please you.
--->------
You should see the new line of go
carts at Cards. All the latest improve
ments, and the prices are right.
Everything you could possibly need
in the bakery line may be found at
Sundell's Cafe, and fresh every day
Out of town parties desiring to con
suit with DR.. Wood, the eye and cal
specialist, are requested to make APP
pointments by letter, and thus avoid
inconvenience to all concerned.
>>-----
For rent-one five room house and
one seven room house at F'inkles park
East Main street: one ten room mod
ern house on North Third street: two
store rooms 20x40 in Finkle's block
East State street. l. S. Finkle, 112-114
Eas: State street.
A return engagement of California
the attraction that played the CHRIST
mas date at the Odeon. has been Sc
cured for next Wednesday evening. IT
will be remembered as being a good
melo- drama, filled with exciting scenes
in the far west.
DR.. II. Janss is nicely located In his
new pharmacy at 204 East Main. 1t is
one of the neatest little places of bust
ness in the city. all on the ground floor,
with his office in connection. DIR. Janss'
stock of drugs is all fresh and was Sc
lected for a general trade.
A reception for the welcome of Rev.
William Pence James and Miss James
will be given by the Ladies Guild of
st. Paul's church Monday evening, Feb.
90, at o'clock. at the home of Mr.. and
Mrs. d. W. Marston, 401 East Main
street. All are cordially invited.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1903-02-21
The Easv Pill.

DeWitt's Little Early Risers do not
grippe nor weaken the system. They
cure biliousness, iaundice, constipation
and inactive livers by arousing the Sc
cretions, moving the bowels gently. yet
effectually, and giving such tone and
strength to the glands of the stomach,
liver and bowels that the cause OF the
trouble is removed entirely. These ia
nous little pills exert decided tonic
effect upon the organs involved. and If
their use is continued for few days
there will be no return of the trouble.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1903-02-21
In the Police Court.

w. j. Rutherford. who was arrested
Friday for assault and battery, pre-
ferred by d. d. Robinson. was given his
hearing in Mayor Jones court Friday
afternoon. He was found guilty and
fined s25 and costs, which he paid
Rutherford was arrested after he had
settled on charge of gambling. Tie in
formation was filed by Marshal Mich
olson, alleging that he had gambled
with both cards and dice. Rutherford
waived examination and was released
on his personal bond which was fixed
at 5000.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1903-02-21
at IS cents.
Recovered Speech and Hearing.

Messrs. Ely Bros.:-I commenced US
ing your Cream Balm about two years
ago for catarrh. My voice was some
what thick and my hearing was dull.
NV hearing has been fully restored and
NV speech has become quite clear. l
am a teacher in our town.
l.. G.. Brown, Granger, O.
The Balm does not irritate or cause
sneezing. Sold by druggists at so cents
or mailed by Ely Brothers. Sc Warren
street. New York.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1903-02-21
Mysterious Circumstance.

One was pale and sallow and the
other fresh and rosy. Whence the diff
ference? She who is blushing with
health uses DIR. Kings New Life Pills to
maintain it. BY gently arousing the
law organs they compel good diges-
ton ard head off constipation. Try
them. Only % cents at George r
Powers, druggist.