davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17
NOT LIKELY TO BE PoPU! \R,
ScripturaI Method of Carving Fowls
Has Disadvantages.

IdS
A scriptural method Of carving
fowls when in secular company was
claimed by witty monk who, having
been asked to carve one day, said:
"Inasmuch as you demand it, l will
carve the fowl according to biblical
principles" YES" exclaimed the
hostess, "act according to the scrip.
lures" The theologian therefore be-
gan the carving. The baron was ten
dered the head Of the fowl, the baron
ess the neck, the two daughters a
wing apiece, and the two sons first
joint, the monk retaining the re-
mainder. According to what inter
probation do you make such divis-
ion?" inquired the host of his con-
lessor, as he regarded the monks
heaping plate, and the scant portions
doled out to the family. From an
Interpretation Of my pwn," replied
the monk. LAS the master of your
house the head belongs to you by
right; the baroness, being most near
to you, should receive the neck,
which is nearest the head; in the
wings the young girls will recognize
a symbol of their mobile thoughts,
that fly from one desire to another;
as to the young barons, the drum
stricks they have received will re-
mind them that they are responsible
for supporting your house, as the legs
of the capon support the bird itself"
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17
Proud of His Norwegian Birth.

Edward Grieg, the Norwegian com
poser, dislikes the use of the word
Scandinavian" as applied to him. Re
Gently there appeared in an English
monthly magazine an article entitled
"Grieg, the Scandinavian Composer"
Grieg, when he saw it, sent a tele
gram to a friend in London requesting
him to see the editor and explain that
he was not Scandinavian but Nor
wegian. 1t is an interesting circum-
stance that but for the Jacobite trou-
bles he might have been Scotsman
His ancestors, the Greigs, emigrated
from Scotland after the affair OF 1745
and settled in Norway.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17
Ace of Cats.

Herr Pohl, president of the German
Society for the Protection of Cats, has
Just published the results of his inves-
tigation in regard to the age, which 1t
is possible for these animals to attain.
Cats, he says, are like human beings
in one respect. The more peaceful
and better regulated their life is, the
longer they are likely to live. AS a
proof, he points out that favorite
cat in the Royal Castle of Nymphen-
burg has lived to be forty-two years
old, and consequently may fairly claim
to be considered the dean of cats in
Germany.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17
Eps<a rps %sA S1lxIre
PROFILE FAN AtoWnlG LOCATION OF LOCKS

Climate will be them most serious OBJ
stacle in the work of constructing the
Panama canal" said Mr.. Alfred Noble,
a member of the Panama commission,
to reporter for the Herald. "The
canal commission in its summary of
the difficulties estimated the climate
as carefully as 1t did the cost of con-
struction.
Personally, believe that the meth
DDS adopted at Santiago and Havana
applied to Colon and Panama will
transform these pest holes into COM
paratively healthy cities.
"You know, the dean of the medical
faculty at Panama divides the. seasons
into the wet period from April Is to
December Is, when persons die of yell
low fever in from four to five days,
and the dry season from December
Is to April Is, when people die Of per-
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17
HAD ANSWERS FOR ALL.

Paris Restaurateur Ingenious In Do.
tense Of His institution.
A restaurant in Paris celebrated
for its high prices was also celebrat.
ed for the ingenious defense Of them
made by Bignon, the proprietor. IN.
Bignon, red herring at two and q
half francs! 1t seems to me that Is
excessive" But these prices are
marked in your interest,"" rejoined
the restaurateur. 1T is the barrier
have established between my
clients and the vulgar. Why do you
come here? To be among yourselves,
to avoid embarrassing or compromis-
ing surroundings. If l changed my
prices the house would be invaded
and you would all leave" Another
patron who complained of a sauce
was asked: did you dine here last
EVENING" mo-" he replied. THAT
is the trouble, then; you spoiled your
taste in the other restaurant" Still
another guest objected to the charges
on his bill, comparing 1t with an
identical breakfast of few days
previous, which amounted to eight
cen and a half francs, whereas the
breakfast in question was charged
twenty-one francs eighty centimes.
81 will investigate the mistake" said
Bignon, who, with the two bills, pro-
ceeded to his desk, returning shortly
afterward. 1T is very true, mon
sieur, that a mistake was made In
your favor last Monday; but l make
no claim for restitution"
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

commissioners to revive the ancient
custom of ringing the curfew nightly.
At Antrim. as at a great many other
towns in Ulster, the curfew was in
former generations rung regularly;
but the practice, like that associated
with the maypole. has gradually died
out until now the places where it still
fingers are few and far between. The
action of the commissioners is based
on purely sentimental grounds. They
have simply revived an old custom be-
cause the people like to hear the bell
and are willing to pay for the privil-
ege, as is indicated by the fact that a
sum of money to pay all expenses has
been handed over to the vestry Of the
parish church.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

TIE present company, however. cut
a sinai. strip directly through the
high ridge, and, at intervals, sank
shafts to tae depth Of the ultimate cut
They lowered us 120 feet down those
shafts in bucket, on a windlass.
1T wasn't pleasant experience, but
1t gave us an opportunity to report on
the actual quality Of soil to be taken
out of this most difficult of cuts. This
was of great value to us, and, had, in
directly, not little influence upon the
negotiations in Congress.
1.-THE other big engineering problem
is the River Chagres, which rises to
great heights during freshets, and dis
charges as much water sometimes as
the whole Lake Superior basin. An
artificial lake, some distance from
the canal is to take the overflow"
When asked whether the French
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

ing that the Panama canal will reduce
the Australian trade through the Suez.
"Most of the Anglo-Australian ship
ping will continue by the old route, be-
cause there is little difference in the
length, and there is always the short
cut for passengers and mail via Brin-
dist. But this does not mean that the
Panama canal will not have great
share of the worlds shipping. New
York Herald.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

nicious fever in from twenty-six to
thirty-six hours.
1.-THE tropics and filth form a COM
bination that only modern science and
Anglo-Saxon energy can hope to con-
quer, and they will conquer. You must
remember that the United States will
have what the French never had, abb
solute police authority from ocean to
ocean. The example of Santiago is
before u.s."
do you think any engineering diff
ficulty can upset the present plans"
was asked.
mo, the canal is perfectly feasible"
answered the distinguished engineer.
1T should be open to commerce in ten
years with the aid of modern machin-
cry and from 10000 to 10000 men,"
where are these men to come
FROM" was asked.
principally from Jamaica. The I'M
skilled laborers must necessarily be
negroes, and the negroes Of Jamaica
and other British West Indian colo
MES are infinitely superior to those Of
the other islands.
1.-The blacks of Santo Domingo, for
instance, are practically worthless.
Loafing is a part of their religion. ia
maican negroes are almost immune
from yellow fever, and engineers who
built the Jamaica railway extension in
1896 tell me they are good workmen-
<hok &c fiuaIu cnookinO nf
course.
Eyes, forty thousand men may be
more than this labor market can fur
nish, but in any case do not believe
American negroes should be employed.
The number of men needed will de-
pend on the amount of machinery.
Owing to the climate, imagine ma
chine will replace hand work wher-
ever possible, even with the cheapest
labor. should say in any event thirty
thousand would be the minimum"
Mr.. Noble thought the American
staff in round numbers would comprise
five hundred men. The machinery
will undoubtedly be American.
I'm handling material" continued
Mr.. Noble, 81 think Americans are
first. The Chicago drainage canal is
the most perfect example of canal en-
cheering that has been done up to the
present time.
1.-THE French have passed us all in
tunnel work near the surface, as
shown in the new Orleans terminal
.and Metropolitan underground railway
in Paris. The English have develop
ed to it's highest point the art Of tun-
neling under water"
Mr.. Noble credits the French Pana-
ma company, organized in 1894, to
take over the De Lesseps wreck, and,
il possible, to save something out of
it, with good judgment and excellent
work.
1--WE only had twelve or thirteen mil
lions capiesl, and instead of spending
this in carrying on the De Lesseps'
plan, dug a triangular strip of the pro-
posed excavation straight through the
summit at Culebra. Not only will the
actual work done be used in the final
construction, but the company thereby
could give the most practical answer
possible to Panama critics.
ut had long been said, in fact en-
gineers insisted upon it at the first De
Lesseps congress, in 1879, that the cut
through the mountain was an insur-
mountable obstacle. The ground was
thought to be extremely hard to exca-
vate in some places, in others of soft
clay, sand and water that could not
be held.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17
Quite a Casualty List.

The following epltaph IS from
monument in cemetery in Newark
N. j.:
Here lies the body Of
John Black,
Aged As.
That cherry tree of luscious fruit
Beguiled him up too high.
The branch did break and down he
fell
And broke his neck and died.
Also three infant children.
New York Tribune.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17
Count CassIni Will Return.

AS soon as it was announced that
Count Cassini, the Russian ambassa-
dor, intended to sail for Europe about
the middle of May, rumor became
current that he would not return. This
is now said to be without foundation.
The count is conceded to be the clev.
crest diplomat in Washington and the
star member of the Russian corps.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17
Quito Appropriate.

Young Wife, hardly know what to
get George for birthday present. Do
YOU think he would appreciate a soil
taire diamond?
Her Brother (who knows him)-He
undoubtedly would-if he happened to
hold the other three aces.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17
Sentiment from Plato.

Wisdom is the true and unalloyed
coin, for which we ought to exchange
all things: for this, and with this
everything is in reality bought and
sold-fortitude, temperance and jus.
tice; and, in a word, true virtue sub
sists with wisdom.-Plato.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17
MAJ SHOWIrIG ROUTE OF PANAMA CANAL.

AS he is now dean of the diplomatic
set in Westinghouse position of much
Importance in European eyes-it is
not regarded as likely that the shrewd
Russians will care to relinquish the
advantage which this gives them.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

The Ameer of Afghanistan has linn
tied the number Of wives permitted
his male subjects to four. The oppo-
sition press of Afghanistan will prob
ablv accuse the Ameer Of encouraging
race suicide.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

The wife of Junius Brutus Clay &C.
cidentally killed her husband while
pigeon shooting in Kentucky. Per-
haps she had been practicing on clay
pigeons.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

A man in Texas has been given
two years for breaking into jail.
Breaking out does not seem to be
nearly so serious an offense.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

II is claimed that most OF the South
American revolutions are started IN
New York by people who are in the
oun business. This must be erro-
neous. They don't use anything but
pole-axes and crowbars in those al
, fairs.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

Students at Stanford university
have been forbidden to flirt. If we re-
member rightly there was once an old
gentleman named Canute who forbade
the tide to come in.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

It was a piece of bungling manage
lment on the part of Santo Domingo to
spring a revolution on the public at a
time when the Buffalo mystery was
ON the boards.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

Some idea of what the 100000
IN cash in the U. s. subtreasury at
New York looks like may be got from
| the fact that 1t will take the 20 ex-
bert clerks who have just come on
from washington six weeks to finish
counting 1t.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

Gunners shoot through yellow
spectacles with 80 per cent more &C.
curacy than without. Yellow politics
and yellow journalism are not so &C.
curate as yellow cunning.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

! A Cincinnati man who wanted to
cure his grip by thinking 1t away
has been arrested on a charge OF DIS
orderly conduct. This promises TO
be a very busy silly season.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

It will soon become necessary Tor
the life insurance companies to In
clude this in their lists Of questions
to applicants for policies: DO you
sing Mr.. Dooley?"
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

Sir Thomas Upton has found COM
pany willing to insure the new Sham
rock for 100000, but he will probably
have difficulty in finding anybody who
will insure his winning of the cup.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

New Yorks automobile cranks are
beginning again to kill on the old
people and the young children. Is
there to be no remedy but the shot
gun?
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

Talk about spring poetry! The chi
.cago News says: This week has been
a sort Of meteorological sandwich
two slabs of November drizzle, with
a delicate slice of June in between"
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

An English scientist announces that
the maximum brain weight of the fe-
male is reached in the 18th year
There, that explains why girls OF II
know so much more than their moth
ers.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

Canada proposes to bar out cigar
cites. If this is done the idea OF first
weakening Canada and then taking
the country easily will have to be
abandoned.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

The Boston school teacher who told
the children of her class to write de-
scription of her for an English compo.
sition took long chances.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

The man who makes two blades Of
grass grow where only one grew be-
fore is a true friend to the other man
who manufactures lawn mowers.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

The ice is out Of Bass lake in New
York state, and the late William
Nichols was thus enabled to rock a
boat there last week.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

Shamrock III. may outsail Shamrock
I. and still come in several lengths to
the bad when it tries conclusions
with the Reliance.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

Most of those who believe a child
inherits its parents abilities think so
because they notice it in their own
children.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

They are still testing blue laws IN
Philadelphia. Some day the city may
wake up and get within the limits OF
this century.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

Just to relieve the monotony the
Turks have killed a few dozens more
Christians in Macedonia.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

The Mad Mullah has "resurrected'
himself again and is in good condi-
ton to die again.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

This time it is a young Pittsburg
million-heiress who elopes with her
dentist. Beware of the toothache!
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

France is organizing a north pole
expedition. 1t is still two to one on
the pole.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

Illicit love will out sometimes, when
murder will not.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

Read what DR.. Lorenz says aud
learn something about American ~Ns-
toms.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17

And money, by the way, sometimes
talks with trifle too much heat.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1903-04-17
Revivinq the Curfew.

The people Of Antrim have hailed
with delight the decision of the town
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-11-01

Ladies' dOngOla kid foxed patent Tin
light and heavy sOles. none like this for
the price.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-11-01

left on the late train FOR a coast trip
/ of a few weeks.
Such a gown as that Worn by the
bride has seldom been seen on any
occasion Ia the west. The under part
was Of heavy white satin, but this was
so completely covered with Point
/ d'Alencon lace as to make a gown OF
itself. long tulle veil was fastened
to the hair in front with a brooch
which was "a gift from the brides
[ father shortly before his death. II
was a handsome cluster OF diamonds
/ The bridal bouquet was OF white
/ brides roses, and besides the shower
proper showed long streamers Of RIB
bon, to the end of each of which was
attached another rose. thus making Il
shower which covered the whole front
Of the gown.
Mrs. PearsalTs gown was OF pink
crepe, almost entirely covered with
lace. A decided innovation and a very
/ beautiful one was the wearing OF
veil OF pink tulle. which. reaching only
to the waist. was thrown back from
the face. Her bouquet was on the
same order as that Of the bride. but
was Of tail pink chTysanthemums tied
with pink ribbons.
Altogether the wedding was one OF
the prettiest ever seen and was an
event of Importance socially to many
friends throughout the intermountain
region. Mr.. and Mrs. MacVichie viii
return from their trip about Dec. 1,
but they VIII not be at home till about
Dec. Is at 7O2 East Brigham street,
$50
One Of the merriest and most enjoy
able OF Halloween parties ever given in
the city was that at the apartments of
Mr.. and Mrs. W. A. Wetzell last even
ing. The whole upper floor of the Tenn
illuminated palace Of enchantment and
spells Of all kinds appropriate to the
occasion were wrought upon the guests.
The elevator had a sign on It reading
] The Household on the Styx," and
ghostly figure piloted the company 20
the realms above. Here jack-O'-lan-
terms were arranged on every hand 70
light the rooms. and the yellow of the
pumpkin showed everywhere in the dec
orations. In the room at the east end
Of the hall refreshments were served
by Mrs =. W. Wilson and Mrs. Orson
Cox, and to the left of this a Gypsy
room showed a fOrtune-teller where the
curious might learn Of the future. Mr..
and Mrs. tt. j. Burt had charge Of the
games and little Russell Wilson and
Frances Cunningham assisted IN re-
ceiving the guests. A great number
of the musicians Of the city took part
in an Informal programme, and read
ings and stories were enjoyed as well.
About 100 guests were present.
The young girls Of Rowland Hall and
their parents and friends enjoyed a
merry time last evening at a Halloween
party All the guests were in mas
Querade costumes and the house was
decorated with all the embIems Of the
occasion. Jack-o' lanterns and weird
lights OF al kinds were seen on every
hand, and when the time came for un-
masking a scene Of revelry was pre-
scented. All kinds OF games appropriate
TO the time were played and delightful
evening spent by the entertainers and
the entertained.
Mrs. Charles Baldwin VIII entertain
the J. G. w. club at her home, 229
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-11-01

Horace f. Garner. Ogden. ................2 %
Isabel 5 IRE, Salt Lake City..........22
FRANK r. BalL salt Lake City,
Margaret Y. Chambers. salt lake rs
George Hart East BOuntiful. .-....-....-22
Pearl II Durham, Woods cross. Ills
Frank Motley. salt Lake City.-...---.-.2 %
Euphemia Jacobson, salt Lake City. 2S
Christian %. Peterson. Salt Lake City. Is
Almira T. Frazer. Oakley .....-.......-- -
anton c. Nielsen, Brigham City. 81
Joh2nnah Jensen. salt Lake City.....23
L. w Scnuh, MissOula. Mont............2S
Josie r Miller, Salt Lake City........2 q
Robert Leroy. Park City...............32
Mamie Samon, Park City..............l9
Harry i. Dwell Dwell MOnt...-........5T
Sarah G. Burnside, Spencer, Ida--.---Z6
Alexander Winward. Salt Lake CITY,. a
Faunne Fonman, Salt Lake City......32
Ge0rEeH- Benjamin. Eureka .-..-.--.-..--2 5
Eleanor Maxwell, Eureka ...............Z n
seth Brown salt Lake City..-........... -
Tony -. kessleT, salt Lake City ......e0
Frank 9, Brown, Salt Lake Cily.....-..ZS
Mary J. Greenup, Salt Lake City.....,zl
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1903-11-01

departed On the morning train for Seattle,
wash Whtre they win make their home.
Quite pretty evening tea party was
given y eonesday evening at the home ot
Mrs Henry Fares. the occasion being the
eighty ninth oirtniay of Mrs. Webster,
mother of AIRS. Fares. Those present
were Aeslomes Wilcox. Blanchard.
hnealc and Osborne
AIRS. Johnson Of salt Lake, with her
brother. T. Johnson OF Canada. spent
Monday and Tuesday in Park City.
A. q. Christensen returned from Cripple
Creek Tuesday. brin gipg with him his
bride. Mr. and Airs. Christensen Will
make Park City their home in future.
Mrs. Darke Of salt Lake Is visiting
Mrs. Worrau If this place.
Mrs. Thompson entertained wednesday
afternoon nj her home on Park avenue.
Mrs John W. GeiEer entertained n few
trienIS Thursday evening I'm honor Df
Mr. w W. Armstrong Seven and a
half was the game of the evening. BE-
sides the guest OF honor there were pres
ent Mr. and Airs. Sherman Fargo. Miss
Pearson. Mr.. Culberts0n and AIr. Hancc
scion SpirO spent a day or two in Park
curing the week.