The Kootenai herald. [volume] (Kootenai, Idaho) 1891-1904, 1903-03-06
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Tor lawyers to break it.-BOstOn Trans
cript
Inexpensive fight: 81 think 1 shall
go to Europe" How can you afford
to go to Europe?" Il can't, but | can
afford to think. brooklyn Life.
Mr.. Newlywed-Your salads amt
like my mother used to make. Mrs
Newlywed-Wen, your salary amt like
my father used to make.-Judge.
Alice-What makes you think he has
been in love before? Edth-The pro-
posal he made to me was entirely ex-
temporaneous.-Phil Ledger.
A cool reception: Did you notice2
have new electric fan in my Office"
"Oh, yes; l got wind of it the minute
opened the ."-Philadelphia Even
ing Bulletin.
THAT mob scene was handled with
splendid effect" said the critic "Oh.
yes" replied the manager; you see
we hire the Villains creditors to go on
in that scene."-Ex.
'Thats good counsel the new
preacher gave us" said the deacon
(which isl" Love yer neighbor while
he sleeps, but watch him while he
wakes. "-Atlanta Constitution.
81 had a good job on hand last
Nigh" said the first burglar, "but 1
was slipped by an open-faced watch"
Get out!' Fact; it was a bulldog in
the yard. "-Philadelphia Record.
FHftor-
bridegroom's name in this wedding
story of yours Reporter-Oh! yes,
have. I've got him down among
those present. "-Chicago American.
Mrs. Bloggs-Wot's candles gone up
for, Mr.. Binns9 Mr.. Binns-The war,
Mrs. Bloggs. Mrs. Bloggs-Oh!
didn't know them poor soldiers had
to fight by candle-light.-Moo
A building proposition: Cholly-Why
so quiet, Miss Grace? Grace 1ightly)
oh, was building castles in the air.
Cholly-What did you use for a corner
stone? Grace-A solitaire. Town Top
les.
Gayman-So you don't believe me,
eh? l suppose you believe that men
are deceivers ever" Mrs. Gayman--
Not at all. Sometimes they only think
they are dangerous. Philadelphia
Press.
Spoiled his boast: Stout gent-Well,
uir, I'm self-made man. l began life
as a barefooted boy. Thin gent-Wep,
as far as 1 can make out l wasn't
born with shoes on, either.-Moon-
shine.
Hopeful Hawkins-De Teddy mex
door give me some angel cake. Couldn't
you help me a little? Mrs. Stoneheart
Sure. The doctor lives at the second
door, three blocks down.-Chicago
Daily News.
my wife was nearly scared to death
last night" said links. Just before
going to bed we discovered fire in the
house" Lucky manr' exclaimed
jerks. "In the cook stove or the heat
erT-Indianapolis Sun.
He-You women are forever discuss
ing the bad points of your neighbors
If you were to gossip about their gooC
points it would be more edifying. She
Perhaps so, but who would listen tC
s?-Philadelphia Press.
''That was stirring, moving drama
at the theater last night" PILOT ex
ceptionally strong, l presumeY' 81
didn't say anything about the plot.
was referring to the activity of tn,
audience between acts"-l3altimor
News.
"They had hard time killing tina
they? Hung, poisoned and finally cleo
trocuted her" What a waste of tim,
and materialsl Why didn't they pu
her in front of a racing automobile? 2
Cincinnati Tribune.
Those professors: First College Pro
fessor-What are you going to do mex
to get your name in the papers? Sec
ond College Professor was thnkin;
of declaring that the dictionary is to-
wordy to be considered good ltera
ture-Baltimore American.
eff l stand on my head. the bloc,
all rushes to my head doesn't it?" N
one ventured to contradict him. "Now,
he continued, triumphantly. when
stand on my feet why doesn't tn
blood all rush to my feet?" Because,
replied Hostetter McGinnis, your fee
are not empty. "-Tit-Bits.
Tie Literary Edtor-That felloy
Scribbler sent in a poem this mornin
entitled "Why Do l Liver" The Ed
tor-What did you do with it? TIL