The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1903-04-05

clared Bob.
We'll, what is it?" asked Vic, who
knew when Bob was abo II to make 4
revelation. The two constituted the
Society of Universal Philosophy
which, by the way, had sprung into ex-
iStence as result of one oc Boo's in
SEPARATIONS.
This society, whose membership was
limited to the president and vice pres
ident, had for it's object, as the pre-
amble to the constitution, drafted by
Bob, declared: The Investigation and
discussion Of contemporary events, sci
entific phenomena, profound, abstract
and historical philosophy"
The society meets once Il week and
discusses such ques ions as need So
luton. Last week the subject under
consideration was modern political
economy, and when the society was
involved in a brown study Of trusts
and trade and labor unions, the pres
1dent stopped in the midst of q sentence
and announced that an idea had struck
him.
We'll, why don't you tell it?' asked
Wick, impatiently.
In these days of gigantic comhina-
tions Of labor and capital" continued
Bob, after musing awhile, 1t seems 20
me that one class has been omitted
from the organiZat ton movement. There
are the combinations of capital, which
we call trusts, and there are, on the
other hand the combina tons of labor.
In the former class are included the
magnates who control the industries Of
the country, steel, sugar, tobacco, rail-
roads and gas. In the other class are
the men who work for them, banded
together in their u2i)ns, the plasterers,
together in their unions, the plasterers,
bartenders,' coopers', BARRIERS, IRON
workers, cigarmakerS', anC scores Of
other unions.
Large Class Left Out.
Now, there is a large class of people
who gather their money through pecu-
liar VocauonS. There are hundreds
right here in st. Paul, and it seems to
me that something should be done by
these people right away, for If they
do not take some steps u provide fer
themselves they viii surely be crushed
between the upper and neither mill
stones"
Well well. Bob, hats a good idea"
cried Wick, who regarded the utter
ances of Bob as those of IN oracle.
But what would you suggest as wise
to do? Whom would you include in
the-the-what would you call it?"
There you ask three questions. We
will go about this Systematically and
will arrive at some definite conclu-
sion. Now, first, something must he
exc out their living CT Il number of odd
occupations and who are now suffering
from the battle of the two strong ele-
mentS. This movement must be sta; ted
in the interests of humanity. There
are men engaged in odd occupations
who have been thrust ouc of the regu-
lar established occupations by their
circumstances and often by incompe-
tency. But they are human beings
nevertheless, and are entitled to con-
sideration."
Yes, but who are they?"
obviously none of those already in
organized bodies. We must first seek
such occupations as are somewhat Pc
cultar, that are beside the regular vc-
cations, professions and trades"
All, now / see. But when you get
this heterogeneous body organized
what will you name il? Everything
must have a name these days. If you
can't get a name you might as well
give up the project and go on where
you left off Now, we We're thinking
of the relation of trusts To the law
of supply and demand"
League of the Odd Crafts.
Don't get impatient, my boy, don't
get impatient. L have a name The
organization shall be called the League
of the Odd Crafts How does that
suit you?'
Capital. Now, let's get to work and
see who is to be admitted into this
new trust"
That's easy. We can select scores of
strange callings right IN ST. Paul. TO
begin with, have you ever been in the
Ryan or Merchants dining roJmS""
No; have you?"
You bet have. Well, there a., YOU
go in, are men who have nothing TO do
but to take your hat, and who, as you
come out, hand you it, instanter, from
among about $50 or 200 others. How
they remember the hats is more than
can tell"
You are telling me a fake story;
don't believe you. A man to take your
hat! Couldn't you hang it up just as
Well?'
THAT shows your ignorance and il.-
experience. OF course you couldn't, or
you wouldn't enjoy your meal half so
well. But you are wandering from
the subject, my boy. 1 think we might
start out by getting those men in our
league. Then there's Hot Tamale Jack.
who goes about the streets through
the small hours of the night vending
his wares to the stragglers"
I'D rather eat a hot tamale on the
street than dine in a place where I
wouldn't be allowed to hang up nv
hat"
Shut up. Now, we might include
the men who spend the night washing
the streets. The night lunch men will
come in, too. Well open our arms to
the fruit stand men and the glue man
who sits patiently on Seventh strest
showing how tightly his glue will hold
Two pieces Of glass together"
he isn't there any longer. He is
in Minneapolis now"
Need Glue in Minneapolis.
well, if he's there that's a good
place for him. Glue ought to be in de-
mand over there. Peddlers of all kinds
VIII be admitted into this order, and
we will fight for their rights. Now the
more L think of this scheme the more
glorious it appears. When our league
gives dance we will not have to en-
ploy montague musicians. for the or
gan-grinders who come in Will furnish
the music"
Don't forget the peanut men, the
chestnut men and the already-cracked
nut men,"
Who's doing this thing? I can't
name them all in minute, canI? Now
I've thought of one you'd never think
Of The man who yells the hack num-
bers after the theater shall became
member The man who writes cards
on the street corners shall be taken in
and will make a good secretary. The
ola man with the long gray beard and
MS arms ana breast adorned With sus-
penders and handkerchiefs and his
hands filled with memorandum hooks
and pencils shall be admitted. as we'll
as the blind man who, with a bow for
a guide, goes about the streets selling
rugs claimed to be Oriental No class
distinctions Will be countenanced in
tnlS league, except that capitalists and