Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1903-07-25
JUST REVERSED.
\ Member OF THE OWNERS UNION
ATTEMPTS TO SECURE A RAISE.

count OF an Interesting Happening
One Day After Awhile.
One day, after awhile, the foreman
OF the Daily Times printing establish.
ment Of Blanktowns, sat in his Office
looking over some editorial proof
sheets. The foreman was president of
the Blanktown section of the typo
graphical branch of the Federated EN-
ployees' Union of America.
There was timid knock on the door,
and upon the foreman's saying "Come
I'M! General Otisky, the millionaire
owner of the Times establishment, en-
tered, removed his hat and said:
Il have been delegated by the Own
ers' union Of Blanktown to present to
you some grievances
"Now, now, general" interrupted the
foreman, ''let me tell you once. again
and for the last time that I will not
recognize the Owners union or any
delegate thereof. If you, as an individ-
ual, have any grievance I will listen
to you"
"Well, them" said Otsky, II find
that cannot live decently upon the
SIS per week that the employees allow
me as the owner Of this esta blishment,
and ask for an increase to $1S per
week and reduction from twelve to
ten hours work per day."
mo, general; that cannot be done.
The business won't admit Of it. Our
union has just raised the weekly sala-
r1es Of employees-that Of printers
devil from SIS to 500, the typesetters
and pressmen from $3.50 to 5000 and
my own from 5000 to $500 and made
a reduction in all employees working
hours from five to four hours per day,
and with these necessary changes, due
to present prosperity, we cannot grant
your request"
won't you submit my case to arbi
tratonY asked the general eagerly. >
mo, general" responded the fore
man; there Is nothing to arbitrate.
The Baer truth Is that God, in his in.
finite wisdom and tender mercy, has
placed the management of this estab-
lishment in the employees hands. and,
by the Jumping John Rogers, we, the
employees, as true Christian gentle
men, are always infallibly right and
Just, and therefore how can there be
anything to arbitrate? II you are not
satisfied you are perfectly free to sell
out. There are plenty Of needy nonun-.
Ion capitalists on the street corners
who would gladly buy you out and
own this establishment for much less
income than you are getting. You are
much better off than the owners OF
other establishments in the city. The
department store employees allow their
owners only $196 per day, and that is
to be reduced to $1.93 on the first of
the month"
"But the cost OF fivtng is so high"
said the general mournfully. "Rump
steak is 80 cents per pound now"
"Steak!' cried the foreman. "Oh, I
see the cause Of your discontent! You
are living beyond your means and In
dulging in fuxurtes not justified by one
In your station. Look over the back
numbers Of the Times, and you viii
and many articles telling how nicely
people With small incomes can live
high on simple vegeta bic foods with
out any, meat. One article demonstrates
that q man can work hard and retain
perfect health on 5 cents worth of oat-
meal per day. Why, general. if you
will only acquire habits OF thrift and
economy you can be putting money In
the savings bank every week."
Otisky disconsolately turned to 90.
"Stay a moment" said the foreman,
picking up one Of the editorial proof
sheets. II see that in this editorial you
have covertly introduced some social
istic nonsense advocating the idea Of
owners turning over their property to
the employees and sharing more equal
" with them in the general income.
have penc1led out all that stuff and
must peremptorily request that you
cease endeavoring to stir up discomfort
among the owning classes. And you
must stop all this agitation and strife
against the nonunion capitalists. You
must remember that this is free
country; that the constitution guaran.
tees that even the largest owners and
greatest capitalists have the inaliena-
BILE right to freely accept the very low
est income that full land free compe-
tition enables their; employees to cut
them down to. And, II necessary, the
full force Of the army and navy Of the
United States Will be called forth to
enable every capitalist, be he million
aire or humble millionaire, to accept
the lowest income he can get and to
physically, i mentally and morally
starve himself, his wife and babies
without let or hindrance from any dis
contented and strife breeding owners
unions. z Well, general, it is after l
O'clock. Besides neglecing your own
work., you have kept me here several
minutes beyond my regular four hours
time today, and 1 shall have to- credit
myself with overtime and dock you
accordingly. must run down to the
Elite restaurant and get a nice little
lunch and then get out my automobile
and take little Rin in the fresh air
sf