Bisbee daily review., 1903-10-08

the public is prohibited from using the same as beverage, and recon mended to Archibald & Cunningn; for safe substitute.
 Any individual or individuals com ing from Bisbee without an officiai certificate of good health, also O. good intentions, is liable to prosecu- tion, and detenuon on the public works of the city indefinitely.
 Protection of Property.
 Any person c, nvicted of iniuring or destroying city property, such as cut ting down greasewood and soap weeo in the park, inJuring, destroying or effacing discovery monuments shaii be horse wnipped and sent back tol Bisbee the day before the trial.
 Any person found guilty of tapping the Naco pipe line between the hours of D. m. and a half a dozen p. m. shall be adjudged guilty of mis>-e meanor for getting caught.
 Any person injuring or destroying any of the property and parapherna- lia belonging to the fire department, such as pearl oil cans, horse syringes. slop pails or the wheelbarrow in which they are carried shall be ad- judged guilty of misdemeanor in case there be no fire In progress, other wise guilty of felony.
 Public Safety, and deceney. Every individual lassoed from an automobile shall be put on the rock pile for life. provided, however, if the | internal machine be painted red, then in that case he shall be carefully shot. then tied to the rear axle and the ma | chine put in motion towards Mexico. 1 Riding into church while services | are in progress, are by this honorable body considered bad form and consti- l tutes a misdemeanor punishable by a 1 fine of one dollar and seventy-flve cents payable to the local minister.
 Gentlemen of sporting inclinations are reminded that shooting at jack rabbits on the streets of Don Luis
 with anything larger than 45, is absolutely prohibited under heavy 1 penalty as the concussion is calculat- ed to iniure windows in that locality.
 The far signtedness of the mayor
 spell it witn a big "M' or out goes
 your eye-ard common council of Don Luis can only be compared tL that of the Continental Fathers. May | or Hull is not the least bit stuck up
 but clings to his cob pipe and his sky
 blue overalls just as if nothing had happened to him. MT. Beehler quaffs his toddies and puffs his 'twofors' with admirable equanimity, but there is a gold trimmed, satisfied twinkle in his pale grey eye. indicating that he knows he is sitting seIenely astride !! of the rainbow of fame. ready 10 slide
 down into a bubbling sea of limitless propensity.
 Nearly all the big mercantile and I land barons of Bisbee and Naco gave Don Luis the loud ha, ha! in the nev
 CT to be forgotten days of its weak
 ness and tribulation, now they all
 want to butt in for the big end of the
 wedge. Where once the time hon
 ored soto blazed forth under --e flint
 and pink of the pioneer to guide hii followers onward in safety, where (
 thousand times the startled jack rab bit reported unto his better half tht
 suspicious movements of the early
 riser and their downy brood moved
 back into the tangled grease wood fol safety. Soon the electric lights shal
 glare even more gorgeous than ths United Brethren lightning bug, ths
 trolley car shall prowl the streets witt unrestrained right of way, always 1T
 hurry till it gets started. moving
 when the mob makes it move, ant
 stopping when it listeth. Cutting of
 dogs tails anG putting old maids int
 eternity:
 All these things shall come to pas.
 in the diminutive future in the me tropolis of Don Luis. and the whole cheese will show yOu where to dis your well, and if you don't find wate, God pity you, and you will only have
 an equity of redemption in your owr property. You will have to plan side walks when side walks are sug l, gested or your patch of gravel be
 longs to some one else. hy order O. the uncommon council. You vii have to contribute to the purchase o ten thousand dollar pipe organ ant bulkhead your front door with twelve1 by twelveS every time some ol'
 hypocrite comes by feet first in hi little glass wagon or you will be ou of caste with "the seuperbs."
 Out of the abundance of his pea , nut trade, the merchant will have t |. give up to the 4th of July fund, th' 'steenth of Ireland. fund. the cam paigr fund and dozen other hold up or go out of business.
 When that great day comes. we vii |. all go down to Don Luis and have pyrotechnic experience at Don Luis
 expense. MESCAL.