The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1903-04-11
TOMS INVESTMENT.

eyes, Squire, I must tell you about
them pigs. You know Mrs. Jack
sons land comes up to mine down
there in my lower field, an it was
about that bit of line fence that me
an her had some little trouble once.
Oh no, it didn't amount to no law
suit nor nothin', only lively little
dispute, an she hauled me up afore
the church committee and testified
that 1 SO far forgot myself not only
as churchman, but as a gentleman
as we'll, that I swore, or words to
that effect.
II was provoked about the old
fence an the woman's stubbornness,
but the 'citin me before the church
was a-humiliation yes, sir, a hu-
initiation
eyes, she came out ahead an
concluded the best thing to do was to
let her alone, for you know how some
women is. Squire, when they git
notion in their heads it stays there,
an however much Mrs. Jackson may
have been in the wrong-in fact, was
in the wrong-she thought was the
offender, and / regarded it as the part
of wisdom to let her think so.
"Well, last Spring I thought I
would plant my truck patch down on
the lower side of that field, where
the soil was sandy an moist and
everything was a-jumpin' and grow
in right along. was proud of that
there patch an KEEP the weeds down,
an it was as fine a patch as you
would see in a day. Things was a.
movin' on smooth enough till one
day, when the sun was gettin' over a
little, l went down to do some hoein'
an fetch some tomats an early sweet
potatoes.
"Well, went along, not thinkin'
'ha11t- -r,1i1cl, af ,,ntl,;r., i., r,art;e.-1o-,-
sweet potatoes, an by Cad there
was one of Mrs. Jackson's half starv-
ed hogs lookin' at me from a potato
row. He had plowed down the whole
consarned row an ruined everything
as he come
Mad Well, 1 amt no saint,
though do try not to give way to
wrath. got over the fence in hur-
ry, an made for that there hog.
run it up an down an over an acrost
an it beat me every time. 1 saw the
hole he come in at, but that there
hog wouldn't see it. He was built
for runnin'. He had inherited ten
dencies to root hog or die. 1 am not
a runner, but many fool keeps in a
race after he knows he is beat. We
experienced that at the fair last Fall,
didn't we, Squire?
well, can laugh now, but was
most dangerously mad then, an
the longer I run the madder an hot
ter got. The sweat was a-runnin'
off me an my linens was gettin'
purity we'll soiled, l reckon, but after
a while I got that there hog in a cor
ner an closed in on him, my legs an
arms stretched out to kind o. flank
my forces, you know, Squire, an 1
was a-sayin', Now I got you-you-
you-p couldn't think of no word
that wasn't unchurch1y. Well, /
closed in little all round, that there
div'lish hogs little sharp eyes a.
watchin' me, an suddenly he made
break for ny-for my centre posi-
tion-went between my legs an up
set me by the force of the rush an
rolled me, sweat, linens an all over
in the fresh ground he had rooted up !!
well, l jes' laid there an groan-
ed. l couldn't get on my feet. l
had lost an was defeated an crushed.
/ was sight when I did get up. If
any man ever was sorry he had join
ed the church 1 was then. 1 hunted
up my hat, got over the fence an
started home Half way acrost the
field l met young girl-Mrs. Jack
sons daughter, l reckon, goin' home
from the post Office. She was dress
ed in some kind of loose, light, sphinx,
spank, pink dress, as clean an cool
as icicle. She had on fluffy white
hat with roses an things. She was
a contrast to me, 1 tell you She
said Good afternoon, or somethin' +,
an smiled, an'I-well, 1 didn't say
nothin'-I was mad
when 1 got home l called Tom
an told him to get couple of the
fellows down and fetch up that there
hog dead or alive an pen him up.
At supper Tom reported that they
had the hog penned an hadn't no
bother.
"'Well, said I, Thomas 1 want
you to go over to Mrs. Jackson's this
evenin' an tell her how feel about
this here matter. That we-you'd d
better say we, Thomas-don't want
no trouble nor nothin' not fair, but
she must send over an git that there
hog an pay the damages or forever
after hold her peace Tom went,
an when got around next mornin'
he said
Mrs. Jackson made poor mouth
said that her hired man was care
less an didn't half feed the pigs an
she didn't know what to do, an a
whole lot of stuff, till she had so
worked on my feelings that I just up
an bought the DANCED pig from her.
I've got little idle money anyhow
added Tom, kind O. excusin' his lack
of backbone, an thought 1 might as
we'll invest little an make it earn