Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1903-01-10
HE TALKED TOO MUCH

THE next time get to feeling right gay
and conversational, I'm going to stake my
self to nickel car ride, go way out into
the country somewhere, walk from the car
about 300 yards into the woods. and say II
all to myself remarked a p street house
/ holder mournfully. II never came SO neal
feeling like that parrot that confessed that
he talked too blamed much as 1 did the
other evening.
And here's why:
Last summer, when the time came
around for me to dig up another - for
dog tag for my fox terrier, sort o side
stepped on the proposition. happened just
to need the 81 for something else at the
time, and as had been buying - worth
Of dog license for that mutt from the Dis
trict government for about eight years, l
cor cluded that had about done my share,
considering how many dogs there are run
ming about Washington that never saw the
color of a tag. Moreover. somebody had
| stolen the old tag from my dogs collar
| only few days before.
$50 I decided to become a little crafty
and dodge the g dog-tax for the present
year.
"These dog-catchers,' said to myself,
never take a peek at the tags attached to
the dogs collars. If they see any cd kind
| of tag jingfing from a dogs collar, they
| pass on, taking it for granted that that
! dogs tax is all paid and settled for. Con-
| seQuently. what's the use Of paying y for
a little piece OF brass that's never looked
| at, when brass is 50 cheap?'
| I've got little tinkering work room up
| at my house. and so one Sunday made q
| dog tag. 1 didn't have any model. the old
| tag, as l say, having been swiped from
| the dogs collar by some predatory youngs-
ter, probably, but, after fooling around for
awhile. 1 framed up piece Of brass and
| stamped it so that it looked a-plenty like
an honest-and-truly dog collar.
| Now. son. I remarked to the mutt
| when I fastened the cutely-stamped piece
| of brass to his collar, all you've got to do
| is to sit or stand around looking innocent
| or chesty, as you please. when you see the
dog catcher, coming your way, and you
won't be bothered The piece Of brass'ill
| bluff him out all right. Don't sneak away
| or try to crawl under porch or anything
| like that just because you yourself know
| that you've got phony or bogus dog tag
| on. and the uog swiperll never know the
| difference
1.-The dog wagged his tail as much as te
say. I'm next. all right, and the next
| afternoon when l was coming home from
the office saw him sitting placidly on the
| pavement curb watching a dog-catcher with
| a net just as If his dog tag was as good as
| any ever issued by the District government
The spectacle tickled me almost foolish,
was so delighted with my own ingenuity
| After that the dog-catcher's wagon came
by the house time and again while my fos
| terrier was fooling around in front, bui
none of the canine kidnapers made any
move toward grabbing. the dog-the coun
| terfeit tag had EN- fooled proper.
| We'll. one evening last week on my way
| home from the office in the open carl was
| sitting In the last seat-1 got to telling q
| friend who sat alongside me about the
| great dog-tax-dodging game Of mine.
It's the simplest thing in life,' I tolt
| him, and a man that's got the gumptfon tt
| edge up a little piece of brass has got ne
| more right to pay 81 dog tax than he has
| to pay a campaign assessment when he car
| dodge it,, and then I went ahead and ex.
planned the thing to him at great length
| chuckling gleefully the while and pokins
| him in the ribs at intervals the better tt
| force him to see how cute and cunnin'
had been. l noticed that roughly dressed
| black man standing right behind US on the
| rear platform of the open car seemed tt
| extract heap Of amusement from my re-
| cital He just doubled himself up laughing
| over it, and he got off the car at P street
| where 1 debarked. He was still laughing
| wholesomely to himself as he walked dowr
| p street behind me, and l was glad thai
| my little story Of the way 1 had chisellet
| the dog department of the District govern.
| ment out of 81, for dog tax tickled him sc
| hugely.
| But wasn't so glad when, on the Col.
| lowing evening, few moments after mad
/ got home from the Office that same black
man-and he was still chucklng, too. con.
| found hmi-alghted suddenly from The
his net Skillfully over my fox terrier with
\ the phony tag, and gathered him in, Ano
II wasn't tickled a little bit, either. whez
had to sail over to the pound and dig ur
| a s. note, 81 Tor charges and 81 for tag te
! get that dog of mine turned loose.
| I'm going to address all OF my era fly
conversation to myself in the future. IT'S
| cheaper"