The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1903-02-21

by Il . x
90 Polite.-He-W Won't you sit ID IN.
chair, Miss Spooner7 Miss spoonar
After you.-Punch. ss'#a3s.45s5
"Are you familiar with the MOTIF.
Of Jigganini's new opera r. "Yes. 4
needed the money. Puck.
D Nodd-"How did you come out !,
that scrape with your, wifep" TodS
LAS usual, apologiged for being
right. "-Brooklyn Life. " ,Is
Fudge-"So You have given M sr,ok
ing? Did 1t take much win power 4
do it?' Judge No: 1t was 'wonp
power."-Baltimore Herald.
Not to Escapes--ttW hat did Miss An
tlque do when she was, finally success
full in finding man under her bed
send for a policeman mo; she sent
for a minister. Judge. zz2
II wonder what he'd do IL he could
see himself as others see for about 4
minute% "Pshaw! He'd say he was
Jealous Of himself and go it In tho
same old way."-Chicago Tribune.
Spoke From Experience.-Friend-
haven't seen you for some time. Poet
NO. Fact Is, have become good
deal Of a recluse lately, Friend-I
feared as much. How much do Won
owe?-Ttt- Bits. ..s, =, . Is r.
Doctor-Your temperature Is I'D to
one hundred and seven. Auctioneer
Observation-Disclosures an seven! Hun.
dred an seven! Going, going at hun.
dred an seven! Who'll make 1t hun.
dred an eight?-Chicago News.
A Change.-"Well." said Noah. as he
hunted for dry spot on the top Of
Ararat, "a lot Of people came down to
the pier to josh US when we started
but I don't see any OF them around to
poke fun at our home-coming."-Life
Hamley-You seem interested In the
horse show; have you any entries
there? Phamley-Well-er-yes. Ham.
ley-Prlze winners? Phamley-T hope
SO. They're my three eldest daugh
ters, and all marriageable.-Phila
phia Press.
Son Of the House-Won't you sing
something, Miss Muriel2 Miss M
Oh, l daren't after such good music
as we have been listening to. Son Of
the House-But I'd rather listen to
your singing than to any amount Of
good music!-Punch. ... d ,uE
II don't suppose he meant anything
unkind," said the young woman; "but
1t was very startling coincidence"
What do you mean?' "Just before
Harold and l got married his friends
persuaded him to join don't worry
club. "-Washlngton Star.
"Well, weIlr' he exclaimed, as he
tackled her first pot-pie, where did
you get this" II made that out Of
Mrs. Shouter's cook book" replied the
young wife; "it's =" "Ah" he
broke in, "this leathery part is the
binding, / suppose. "-PhiladelphIa
Press.
IF one would hear really fine mu-
Sic" said the Wagnerite. zone must ex-
pect to pay we'll for it, THAT'S
right" replied Hauskeep. snow, was
listening to some music to-day that
was great, but expensive-a couple Of
tons Of coal rafting into my CELLAR
Philadelphia Press.
"And when you marry" she softly
said. II hope you'll remember to invite
me to the ceremony" He looked
thoughtful. ut will be awfully crowd
ed, no doubt" he said, but think
can ring you In somehow" And mo.
ment or two later she declared the ring
was an astonishingly good fit.-Cleve.
land Plain Dealer.
I'm SO glad the boys of your com.
pany gave you that handsome revol.
Ver." said the wife of the militia com.
pany; I'VE need have no fear of the
burglars who Infect the nelghborhood
now" That's So" replied the cap.
tain; "1've got it locked up In the safe
at the office. where they can't get at
1t. "-Philadelphia Press.
II WISH" said Senator Sorghum, pen.
siVely, that you would refrain from
circulating these reports that l am.
willing to pay for votes" "Do you
deny the charger" s@tfhat has nothing
to do with the case. don't want eV..
erybody who might be willing to vote
my way to feel that he is wasting
Observation-Disclosures Star. &
In a Fix.-"T knew a man once who
didn't believe In swearing, and he
came home one day to find all the
water-plpes frozen, two of the chill
dren down with measles, the cook
gone, together with all the spoons, and
his wifes rich aunt come to make q
visit" What on earth did he sayT
He said, oh, fudge!" Washington
Times.
Light in Darkness.-A< Frenchman
was paying his first visit to London,
and was walking through Hyde Park
on one of the many foggy metropolitan
mornings with an English friend
"Fogi Ha. ha, mon. fren, CALCULATED
the Frenchman; "now / understand yot
you mean ven you say re sun neyaRe
set on your dominion. Ma foie, tides