The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1903-11-01
AN ANTE-MORTEM OBITUARY.
BY LULU LINTON.

Serena Blakemore was the only woman
of recognized literary ability living near
the Cross Roads. The Cross Roads people
did not state the fact in exactly these
words, but they recognized the truth Of II,
and paid their respects accordingly.
The neighbors said that serene was a
powerful good hand at writin' things" and
Serena herself would say complacently. II
just write for pastime, and because think
it would be shame to bury the talent the
Lord has given me-"
After knowing her to be the wife of
busy, busting farmer, mother of six robust
children and general overseer of the chicken
yards and truck patches, one doubted her
need of pastime, and strangers reading the
productions of her pen doubted that her
gift came from a divine source.
Best of all, or worst, according as one
views literary attachments, Serena was
versatile writer, being able to change her
thoughts from prose to poetic channels, or
vice versa as OCCASION demanded. She had
not appeared yet in high-priced maya
zines, but this did not worry her in the
least, for the high-priced magazines had not
appeared in Cross Roads circles, and what
pleasure could it give to appear in print,
with ones name signed in fancy type, if
ones friends did not read and admire?
Births, weddings, anniversaries and sur
prise parties were all fruitful themes for
her pen, but her gift seemed strongest in
the obituary line. Friends sent for her
from far and near when death entered their
homes, and Serena never failed them. She
had been known even to leave her washtub
on Monday morning, although every one
knew her strict observance of Monday as
washday, wipe her sudsy arms, roll down
her sleeves, tie on dry apron, and be ready
| to start at once for the house of mourn
ing, where items Of interest in the life of
the deceased were poured into her sympa-
| thetic ear.
| To be sure, her obituaries all had some
| thing of the same tone, those for adults be-
| ing on the "vacant-chair" order, while
those written for children were always OF
the innocent-lamb type, but the verses at
the end always varied; they were obviously
original. The obituaries were sent to The
| County Republican or The County Demo-
crat. according to the political tendencies
| of the deceased. The editors writhed in
secret, but were silent. At one time a
| young city fellow. who had accepted posi-
ton news editor The Republican.
/ writhed noisily, saying in decided language
that all such tommy-rot had to be thrown
| out, but the gray-haired managing editor
had smiled queerly and given the city fell
| low his choice of using said "tommy-rot'
or having his resignation handed TO him.
! The gray-haired man was wise, and he
knew that the bereaved members of the
family would come in for extra copies to
send to absent friends. They would proba-
bly, not pay for these extras, but often in
| the early days of their bereavement, while
their hearts were softened, they remem-
bered to pay up a few years delinquent
/ subscription, and even in the newspaper
| business it is sometimes necessary to use
policy.
But to return to Serena and her lift. 1t
| was rumored that she wrote verses In her
spare moments, and kept them on hand,
lust changing the names to suit the occa-
| sion. This probably accounted for the lack
OF meter i'm some cases. 1t was also rumored
that she had written her own obituary, a
full column of prose, with half-coiuInn
| poem, TO be used when needed.
There was one drawback about the bust
ness, and that was the close watch the
neighbors kept over her notices, and their
jealous watch over the length of her poems
making it necessary for her even to count
the words in the articles, and see to it that
each poem contained exactly the same num-
Der of lines.
This was quite difficult in some cases
where the leas: said the better for the party
concerned, as when old Bartonhimer ended
his no-account life by blowing the few
brains he possessed TO the four winds with
his old shotgun. Serena spent a sleepless
night over the writeup, but il came out with
appropriate headlines ard the usual touch
ing tributes. She was compelled 10 state
that he was not a professor of religion
but added warmly; He was known to be
an earnest seeker after the truth"
When the neighbors read this there were
some cutting comments and old Mrs. Bur-
gonire fastened over at once to interview
Serena, for she resented the fact that the
old reprobate had received Just the same