Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1902-02-10
GLUED TO THE BARREL.
Unhappy Fate Of Man Who Went
After New Cider. M
John Quill Tells Of Evening Call on
Old School Friend.

|
a great deal of in our school days ant
I haven't vet got wholly over il. She
has an ideal home. nice husband anC
| all that. as good as anybody possesses
| You know there are not any of their
perfect. some flaws ana imperfections
| in the best of them. But this fellow
| is Il fair average. or course she
| thinks he has wings and is really the
only symmetrical pebble there is on tbs
beach. but. alas. there are others. only
she doesn't know it. 1t is case with
her Of Where ignorance is bliss il is
folly to be wise.
We chattcd and talked or bygone
days. gone beyond recall. when she was
the reigning belle If the school and l
was ~ tow headed. frecklc-faced youth
with pants at half mast and face like
a dish Of hominy. We had Il very
pleasant evening.
After Il while her husband suggested
that we try u little new cider out of the
rugged wood. which had been presented
him by a relative a few days before.
AS Barkis was willing he clutched n
light. excused himself and disappeared
toward the cellar.
We continued our pleasant converse
ton. that is his wife and I. and soon
forgot all about the cider. One of the
neighbours girls in the other side of
the house about hits time COM
menced to drum on the piano which
caused considerable racket 50 We had
to talk quite loud. After while
began to get Il little anxious about that
enough to go TO Loudon Hill and have
the apples pressed. After while
kept hearing something sounding like a
mans voice in distress. l advanced
the idea that somebody was getting
murdered in the neighborhood by hay
ing a tooth pulled. My hostess as
sured me that there was no cause for
alarm as it was only the neighbours
boy receiving few gentle love pats
from a slipper judiciousiy welded by
his ''marm." a nightly occurrence in
the neighbours side of the house.
/ accepted the explanation and we
resumed the theme of our conversation
that had been so rudely broken by the
howlS. ] still wondered what had be-
come Of the absent member of the
hpGTthpft "hc hoo tVbt fu SSdANh Va
apple juice sometime before. Finally
she suggested that as John had been
gone so long she really thought some
thing must have happened. and if l
would excuse her she would 60 in
search OF him.
calamity volunteered to accompany
her so we together started toward the
kitchen. No John there.
Finally she opened the cellar door
and it was dark as Egypt down there.
She said. John, are you down there"
The voice that came floating up from
the bowels Of the earth was no spirit
voice; ii was a miniature cyclone and
reminded one of n no-school whistle on
stormy day. He was there an right.
no question about that, SO she procured
a lamp. lead the way while / brought
w the rear, and the missing John.
like the long-lost DIR. Livingstone was
found
He was glued to the barrel. You
couldn't entice him away. After con-
siderable coaxing on his wifes part and
words Of sympathy on mine he told us
his tale of woe. 1t seemed that when
he reached the cellar with the pitcher
~ Vic fdhO anu tiiC iSht III tht VtuCI
he was searching to locate the barrel
when he stepped on piece of coal. The
sudden jar knocked the chimney off
the lamp. To steady himself ne
grabbed the first thing that came handy
which unfortunately was the wooden
faucet in the cider barrel and that of
course came out in his hand. The ap-
pie juice flew in all directions and
blew the light out and in his skirmish
to save the lamp he lost the faucet,
so was obliged to put his thumb in the
hole to save the liquid and when he
came to paw around in the dark for the
faucet he of course couldn't find it.
II was then that he howled and the
dear child in the other side of the
house who was playing the rag time
hymn just drowned his melodious
voice; crying for help in the wilder
ness, while we were enjoying ourselves
in the coy parlor up stairs. He
laughed. y far away laugh when lie
told III, the story. but have heard
laugh with more lnirth in ii In my day.
After clearing up the Wreckage and
putting the cider faucet back where II
belonged and getting a swollen thumb
out Of the hole, we adjourned to the
upper region to partake of the juice of
the unforbidden fruit.
But there was Il sort of dampncss
In the air. u feeling that there are
times in this world when man and
wife prefer being alone and this was one
of them. so folded my tent like the
H. -