Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-05-08
a POSSIBILITY
That Became a Fact and

"a Il
That Became a Fact and
Pleases Many Bald People
A II Lewis, NJ d, in a lengthy
article in the columns of the
American journal of Health, says
concerning hair: "Its deteriora-
tion is constant source of worri-
ment to humanity, consequently
bald people are readily deceived
by fake hair restorstives. The
wish that q hair preparation will
fill the bill' is father to the fancy
that it is likely to do SO. A rare
case in point is that of Newbro's
Herpicide, which actually does
Gill the bill Itdestroys the para
site that attacks the hair root,
and prevents dandrutf, falling
hair and badness. Elliott & Har-
vey.
j B Lyon and j J Amen and
son, Curtis, departed last night
on the Overland Limited, for a
few days business trip to Michi-
gan. Representing the Missouri
Valley Commercial Club, Messrs
Lyon and Amen will make thor
ough investigation of manufac-
turing plant located at present in
a Michigan city and if the claims
OF the owners of the plant are
substantiated the plant will in all
probability be moved to this city.
A poetical contest is in progress
between the business men of Mo.
Valley, and nearly ever day some
new gladiator Jumps into the are
ma through an etfusion in the
Times. The productions are get
ting quite personal in nature and
show plainly that none of them
would do for the profession. We
think Bert Lyons shows the most
ability as a genuine iingler of
linglers. Woodbine Twiner.
A New York club determined
to give a planked shad dinner Gin
honor Of the heroes of the war
with SPAIN Among those in
vited was a volunteer officer who
distinguished himself during the
brief spell of fighting in Cubn.
His reply to the club secretary in
cluded this sentence. IL am.
Obliged to decline your kind in
vitatlon, as am neither o hero, q
shero nor shadroe.
State Fish and Game Warden
Geo A Lincoln of Cedar Rapids
can now 90 back and sit down.
For the next two years he will
have absolutely nothing to do but
to draw his salary. La the rush.
hustle of winding up the session
and seeing to it that no railway
assessment bill was passed, the
general assembly quite forgot the
usual $4,000 appropriation for
the state fish and game commits
sion Dalton's Democrat.
The enterprising manager of n
Chautauqua bureau recently Of
fered Senator Hanna $4,000 for
series of eighteen lectures in
the south aud middle west. He
was sorely disappointed when the
Ohio boss refused to consider his
offer. "Why," said the manager
plnintively, "it's as much money
as he gets for serving two years
in this senate and he could easily
make the circuit in month";"
Bob Fitsimmons, the renowned
elocutlonist and erstwhile pugilist
arrived in the city this morning
on his way to the Profile Coast
where he is scheduled to debate
with james Jetferies in the near
future.
A man told us the other day
that we did not publish all that
happens. We should say we don't.
La the first place we have others
to depend on US for a living. If
we published all that happens we
would soon be with the angels. In
order to please people we must
print only nice things of them,
and leave the rest to the gossips,
Yes, it's q fact, we don't print all
the news. If we did, wouldn't it
make spicy reading? But this
would be for one week only. The
next week you would read our
obituary and there would be a
strange face in heaven. -Salix
oiftings.
The following sentence, said to
be taken verbatim from law re-
Gently passed by the Nebraska
legislature, has very strange and
alarming sound. Perhaps a pre-
position or line-o-type has
dropped out of the last phrase:
cit shall be unlawful for any per-
son to fire off or discharge any
pistol, revolver, shotgun, rifle, or
any firearms whatsoever, on any
public road or highway in any