New-York tribune., 1902-10-09
the TAIN OF THE DAY.

robn Chalmers the missionary friend Of Robert
louis stevenson and every inch man. once tele-
grapbed 20 England; Getting In trim for next
season Ask Jones send one gross tomahawks.
one gross butchers knives. Going East. try make
friends between tribes London cOnvulsed
over the missiouary's peculiar way Of promoting
friendship with the New-Gunea cannihals, says a
writer IN The Rochester Post-Express.' Chalmers
had learned that no other two articles were so
likely 20 do this The knife and the tomahawk
were popular for purposes OF barter among people
who would have had TO use for copies OF the En-
cycopsdia Britannica or cuts from fashion
magazine. The telegram was incOngruous only
to the lsnorant.
But what shall say 20 the French police de-
partmeut which the other day announced the sale
by public auction of revoIvers. jimmes. bowie
knives. knuckle busters etc. seized on the crimi
mails arrested during the last twelve months? As
r. is forbidden by law 20 have such articles In
ones possession. 1t would seem that the State is
aiding and abetting felony in selling them 10 the
public.
The Pig and the Monsoose.-The Pig. suffering
from oNerassimilation, went 20 the Mong Josc.
ali Animals In his Mouth he carried two tat
snaSes as an Offering % that sasacious Creature.
I cant think whats Tie Matter with me-
n. knew better than 20 offend the PIC by telling
him. 50 ne remarked. with an Assumption OF
Tut tut, YOU do look bad and no mistake see
what II Is. You are run down We must do Some
4 feH as II a little Change TO- say. the TruHie
Grounds OF Fer.sord would do me good" suggested
The very Thing" replied the Mongoose. You
recommend YOU 20 there at once"
Il viii" answered The Pig, delighted thus 20
have his suggestion confirmed by so wise an Animal
so he departed. leaving behind him the two Fat
SNAKE outside of which did the MOngoose prompt
witness the above Interview, exclaimed, in great
but Papa Why dId you tell the Pig that he was
rIu down and recommend him 70 so 10 the Truffe
cure him is that he should swear or Pig wash FOR
"My SON smiled the sagacious Mongooss. you
know Nothing The Pig wanted me 70 send him
the PIGS Snakes. lie has got what he wanted: so
Moral: Ask your Doctor.
-Condon Truth
Among tho antique tribes Of primevaI Canaan
and PhHnicla the mythology Of the lower regions
named Beezebub as the patron demon OF the fly.
which has been so grtevous pest from primitive
times % the present Was there protective
heud for the hca IN any ancient mythology? How
ever that may have been. London the worlds
capital has been anathemsttzng countless hosts
OF heds In recent weeks while the annoying In
sects of Beelzebub have beor unusually and amaz-
ingIy few and feeble. H4d isn't Il? The wicked
hea-but why pursue tue subject,
You said he was professional musician
ON; no; endeavored 10 intimate that ne pro-
fessed 20 be muscian."-(Detrot Free Press.
Representative Champ Clark tells this one on
General Joe" Wheeler; When the spanish
was brewing General Wheeler was anxious 10 get
into the night. II there was TO be one. An ex-Cou-
federate met him on tho avenue and said: Cen
cral, why are you so anxious for a scrap with
SPAIN Sir replied the general. tt's my trade
my trade His daughter said TO the general that
surely ne had had enough OF fighting TO satisfy any
reasonable man from 1861 to is65. and he should
stay al home and let the young men DO the fight
ing. Now. daughter said the general, II fish
had been out OF the water thirty odd years and
came in sight OF a nice looking lake he would wig
gle little. at any rate. wouldn't he: And the
old warrior did wiggie into the thickest Of the
hight"