Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1902-01-07

tzing trom the top of a dry goods /
box. The populiSt uprising in Kansas
developed many queer characters. but
it sent an exceedingly strong delrga-
tion in Harris. Hudson. Davis, Baker
and Jerry Simpson,
Even if the Pops should ever elect
n president .crry is saved by reason
of his for On birth from the time
serving. double dealing. good Lord
good devil policy Of many who aspire
to that exalted position. He is barred
by the constitution and has no induce
nents of ambition leadin. him into
the soncrsault business, an acrol,atie
feat which has undonc so many aspir-
ing statesmen.
In one=rcspcct he occupied Il frlici-
tous position III the ho,lSc. He was
always certain OF applause and en-
coura%cment when he went into the
SEinnin@ business
If he llaycd the Democrats. the Re-
publicans yelled with delight If he
pounded the Republicans the Demo
Gratis made the Wrii1il ring With their
cheerful voices. So Icfly Welt on
taking scalpS and hanging hides up
to dry until tie hammer fell at high
noon March I. 1880. saundiu@ lie bno!l
for HIM and Il vast caravan who went
thence te=the pale fcalnsS of political
shade
Willie by no means a Ci.prai,fsn ora
tor. he Wa~ clever i'll repat'trr rich in
cpi&rame and faereil5, ia retott He
has a e9afselfSeA ~tt}e af speaking
! which few moiI poSse~S. al Instance.
| in the short sentence "Co1tlt,meS grow
. otH Of pratrcti5a as nAlt@:l.lE as toad
steHlsf ai.1= eli Rotten la2 le uttered
itIei1 truth than is contained in many
iea4 speech.
Assumed 2, possibility.
\ day or >vo after the Carlisle bill
fell stillban Jerry Wns making
speech and >ajd. There is II great
mystery as to who is responsible for
killing the Carlisle bill. The Demo
crafts diSclaim the responsibility. The
Republicans also disclam it. To settle
that question for All time, | assume
the responsibility. ] killed it," Which
was both witty and cheeky.
Worse Than Grasshoppers.
Jerry is not greatly beloved by the
Republicans OF Kansas. One sutfocat-
ing day in July. 1893, | was coming
home from New York | did not know
q soul on HE train and went into the
smoker. where ! found one man. He
was we'll dressed and appeared to be
INT Il hf
hess struck up !; conversation. inquir-
ing his habitat. "lIlltchnSon, Kansas.
he answered. l asked about the salt
wells and divers and Sllnlry other
things in that neck of the woods until
he said. on seem to be We'll ac-
U,lantcd With kHHs;S." 'Ncs. re-
piled Il located in Wichita in 1873
to practices law, but the grasShoppers
drove me ont Of he state, and don't
believe there has been one there since.
He looked oul Of the window a mo.
ment and then groNlcd Grim'y: No.
! But we have somcthn" out thor" Il
blamed sight worse than he Glasshop-
DcrS' Remembering only too wildly
what couStcrnation those pesky insects
carlicd on their wings to the prop!" OF
Kansas, shouted. "What on earth can
that be-" With ticrcr glcam of the
eye he said. Jerry Simpson, and then
proceeded to roast the sage Of Mcdi
cine Lodge" to II turn. perfectly safe
performance at the distance of Il thou
sand miles, but not calculated to in
crease ones mental comfort at short
range
But if unpopular With the .Iayhawk-
ers. whom he had tl,ounced on every
stump from No Mans Land to the Ne
braska line, Simpson had many friends
i'm congress.
In She winter Of 1891 o. he came near
dying of intlaMinatory rheumatism
and went off for awhile t. a s:lni;arium
down in Virginia. The first tim" he
came hobbling into the house after his
return he was received With generous
applause. which must have warmed
the cookies of his heart,
A Tilt VIII, Dineley.
Though Maine produced Thomas r..
Reed and sent ArtcmuS Ward forth On
his mirth provoking career, her bleak
climate does not seem favorable to the
! growth of humorsts.
OF this quality Governor Dingley
was as destitute as a tombstone. He
made only one effort in that direction
during the Fifty third congress, and
that was not such a bowling success
as to tempt him to repetition Thereon.
III Il running fire debate with Jerry
Simnson on the proposed bond issue
he characterized ]erry's plan as
tJ'riah ueep scheme Of finance. Ana
here's the sequel Two days later Jer-