The Minneapolis journal., 1902-08-29
The NonpareiI Man
Casually Observed.

~
Tha. church attendance figures Of the
Chicago Record Herald show that woman
is only 2 per cent more spiritual than
man. Is this the resultssof bargain Fridays
and N special drives 2sssz.s s ST: -. ~.
The potato which was in reality the
crime of 1901 is DOING very well in price
this year, S55Sss Sc
Fears are expressed in the navy de-
partment that AdnniraI Growninshield will
be half way up the Allegheny mountains
before discovering the proximity OF: the
continent, .--..
The new electric three e-rail line from
Chicago to Elgin is by it's own power
welded to the rails and cannot leave the
track. The suburban COW should take no
tfce and get herself welded to the pas
ture. II; E Fy' > - I 4 ss- : 81 Ss5 :
Yosemite Valley, Aug. .2s.-we were
considerably ANNOYED by bears IN ocr
camp last night but sthe pastor went out
and spoke to them with 'the bishops
voice" and in five minutes there wasn't
a. bear in the valley. q Z, d. +, -,
| We were all up at 5 a. m. to- see the
sun rise and the pastor did the Gladstone
act with his ak on some dead and down
timber, and SO we had breakfast ready by
| 6 a.. m. During this meal there was con-
siderable sparring Between the wit OF
the party and DR.. Morrill, as to the latter's $
prowess with the AK The eighth ward
pastor had claimed the night before that
| he could fell any tree in the valley and
much polite doubt had been expressed by
those who did not know him. It. seems
that the joker who lost the headlight the
day before had been spending half the
night preparing the little contretemps
Uy1oio mas n
| took the temper out Of his edge for sew
| eral days thereafter. The joker had found
a petrified tree standing by itself near the
| mineral spring and had worked hard and
long during the night to cover 1t with
fresh bark ripped from living tree near
by. Against this cold and stony proposi-
| tion the scoundrel with a smile on his
front but guile in his breast, steered ou1
conf1ding and trustful eighth ward pastor
shortly after breakfast. The good mar
| took the bait like "a pickerel. Running
! his thumb along. his ak he smiled at the
rest of us as he tossed off his coat, ex-
perforated on his hands and dealt the
stone tree. ponderous blow, that shiv-
| cred the ak handle like glass and caused
tingle to run up his arms and severa
consultations to drop out of place and ex-
plode by daylight The tree threw of
sparks like a grindstone and about eight
yards Of bark loosened and fell down.
1 have sometimes feared that at this trying
moment the pastors language would have
been too severely biblical, for he showed
every symptom Of internal agitation an6
the beclouding of the mind with anger
had he not recollected himself and re.
marked simply:
j Holy Moke!',s :f.Esss2ssEszz=.ss a. %a-.7
cuss word at which the most fastid-
ious could not take exception.
The pastors ak was found to have beer
4 ripped up: the back q suspender buttor
gone and the blade badly frayed around
the bottom Of the trousers. The tree wa.
4 |uninjured.
4 7 guess the growth here is hard wood.
said the pastor as he sorrowfully mad,
his way back to the tent where he sa
in the shade for several hours meditatine
on the vanity of human wishes,