davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23
A PUZZLED SCIENTIST.
Wasn't Sure of His round when
1t Came to Horse and Mule
Teeth.

Men Of science do not know every
thing that is worth knowing, says the
Chicago Chronicle. A railway con
ductor whose route ran through the
foothills of the Rockies relates:
81 once had a party of college pro-
fessors and students going out to
Kansas and Colorado in search of
relics of past ages. There was a pro-
fessor who had written more about the
drift period, the stone age and all that
than any other man alive, and a cow
boy who boarded the train insisted on
seeing him for a moment. l brought
about the interview, and when they
had been introduced the cowboy said:
"'Professor, I've heard what a
mighty smart mar you are, and l
want to ask you a question. If you
can answer it I'll tell you where your
party can find the most of the bones
of a mastodon. 1 saw them less'n a
week ago with my own eyes,
81 shall be glad to answer any
question: cheerfully replied the pro
lessor.
"'Then tell me why a horse should
have two sets of teeth and a mule only
one, though both are grazing animals?'
"The professor sat right down, and
the smile faded from his face and the
cowboy laughed and went his way. A
mule has just as many teeth as a horse,
of course, but it was evident that the
great man hadn't studied him. He
looked seriously for a long time and
then turned to me and said:
didn't that young man twist
things about? Isn't it that a mule has
two sets of teeth and a horse only
one?'"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

A man who figures somewhat prom
inently in Philadelphia social circles
was attending a grand ball recently in
company with his wife. While dane
ing a quadrille he noticed that his
pants were ripping and hurriedly re-
tired to a d~ressing-room with his wife.
who procured a needle and thread and
began sewing up the rip. While the
man was standing there without any
pants on he heard the rustic of skirts
and it occurred to him that he had
taken refuge in the ladies' d~ressing-
room. He appealed to hia wife and
she showed him to a door which opened,
as she thought, into a closet. Opening
the door quickly, she showed him
through and locked the door. Then
the man began pounding the door.
"Mary," he screamed, I'm in the ball
room!" The door, instead of opening
into a closet, opened into the ball
room.-Chicago Chronicle.
A Common DivisOr.
Difference of opinion is the greatest
common divisor.-Chicago Daily News.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

men by their labors or go running around trying to reform the uni
verse. What a woman wants to vote for is more than | can COM
prehend. OF course there are the regular arguments which the tenn
perance people and school reformers put forth that a woman should
have a vote against the selling Of liquor to her husband or as to
how her children should be educated. But if men cannot or will not
reform any evils that now exist, how women are going to accomplish
the reformation is more than l can see.
If | must be candid, do not believe that women are fitted to
hold positions Of great trust-postions, for example, where there
is the handling of large sums of money. Take bank cashiers, for
example. Men in such positions are tempted and fall every day.
They fall through gambling or specializing or al a result of satisfying
the cxtravagant demands Of some woman. Now put a woman in
such a responsible position. Would she be any stronger? I think
not. Women speculate and bet on horses. Then they have the
love Of dress, diamonds and all sorts Of display, which so often leads
them asray.
But I do not wish to be thought hard on the sex. On the
contrary, am always in sympathy with the woman. Only I think
her place, speaking in general, is in the home. She can perform
. great mission there for the community and the nation.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

The Cook-Mr. Smith says you are q
perfect fright.
The Pretty Parlor Maid-He's a
hateful old thing, anyway.
The Cook-I heard him say so to
Mrs. Smith.
The Pretty Parlor Maid-That's DIFF
ferent. Do you know, I think Mr..
Smith a most agreeable gentleman
Boston Transcript.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

The home is the place for woman. Bv
nature she is fitted to adorn and elevate it.
I speak now, of course, in general. For
good reasons many women are obliged to
earn their own living. | honor them for so
doing and would encourage them in every
way. Brave, honest and se1f-respecting
women obliged to work for themselves or
others should always be aided in every pos
sible way. But
THESE WOMEN WHO, HAVING
GOOD HOMES AND INDULGENT
HUSBANDS, THINK THEY HAVE
SOME GREAT CALL TO GO FORTH
AND SCREAM FOR MORE RIGHTS !
HAVE NO SYMPATHY WITH.
l do not believe the good Lord ever
made women to mix I'D in politics, support
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23
Individual Pear Puddfnrr.

Individual pear buildings may be
easily and quickly prepared by this
recipe: Wash and core large pears,
put them into a shallow baking pan
and set in a steamer; when they are
tender, take out and fill each pear
with chopped, preserved ginger and
it's strip; arrange them in a dish, sift
sugar over them and cover each with
a stiff meringue. Set them in the oven
to brown, and serve.-People's Home
Journa al.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

Hicks-You know that rare piece Of
china that you have always admired?
Wicks--Yes.
"Wel, Mrs. Hicks got a new parlor
maid last week and it is plural now
Somerville Journal.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23
uOWHN'S phHCE AT
HOME

BY Ex-Inspeetor of Police THomAs r of Neu
York, the Most Famous Police Official in America.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

sheets were blown out upon either
bank, and a vertical wave ten feet
high rolled swiftly in upon the jam.
For a moment Secoin gave himself
up for lost. He looked for the jam
to part under his feet.
Then the edge of the big raft above
was lifted, it's great logs tumbled and
piled upon one another until the heap
formed a breakwater through the in
terstices of which spouts and jets fell
upon the logs below. For several min
utes the water rushed against and
through this suddenly formed and
effective dam. Then the commotion
subsidized, leaving the jam doubly eff
fective against any kind of a "break"
which river men may devise.
In reaction from his recent fright
the cruiser became hilarious. In a
reckless exuberance of spirit he
climbed behind the new rampant, and
turning his gun upon the pine stubs
up-river, bombarded them furiously
with explosive bullets.
The thieves had doubtless expend-
ed all their dynamite, for they both
cred the plucky cruiser no more.
Two days passed before he ventured
out of owe Then, making cautious
explorations, he found a deserted
drivers camp and a clear field. A
week went by, and he was living on
game rations when armed men from
Beltrami came to his rescue.
Secoin finished his work without
further obstruction, and at the end
crossed to Moose lake agency to re.
turn the borrowed gun. His friend,
the doctor, listening to his story with
shining eyes, said, II wish I'd been
there."--Ynnth's Communion.
The suburban citizen., 1902-09-06
Great Heat OF Meteors.

Ordinarily the meteors that fash
across the sky at stated periods OF time
burn themselves out in the upper air,
but occasionally meteoric mass lasts
long enough to reach the earth. One
fell on May 10, 1900, at Felix. Ala,
Meteors were seen on the occasion re-.
ferred TO and sundry explosions were
heard, while later on a mass of
meteoric substance weighing seven
pounds was discovered embedded in
soft soil. This meteorite was analyzed
and found to be built up of such min
erals as olivine, augte, triolite, nickel
iron ana graphite carbon.
The dark color of the Felix stone Is
stated to be due to the presence in fair
amount of the last named substance.
The interest attaching 10 meteorites. of
course, centres around the fact that
they enable us to obtain glimpses of
the composition Of other worlds than
ours. Astronomy is well agreed on the
unity Of chemical composition which
marks the orbs, and even the simple
fact that il Is hydrogen gas which
blazes in the sun and gives us our light
and heat is testimony TO this fact
Meteoric carbon and iron similarly dis.
play links between these erratic bodies
and our own earth.
The suburban citizen., 1902-09-06
Exercising Horses.

An English army officer writing on
the care Of horses. says: Regularity
Of exercise is an important element in
the development Of the highest powers
of the horse. The horse in regular
work will suffer less in his legs than
another, for he becomes gradually and
thoroughly accustomed to what is re.
quired Of him. The whole living ma.
chine accommodates itself TO the regu-
lar demands on it, the body becomes
active and we'll conditioned, without
superhoUs fat, and the muscles and
tendons gradually develop. Horses
regularly worked are also nearly ex-
empt from the many accidents which
arise from overfreshness.
'As proof Of the value Of regular
exercise we need only refer to the
stage coach horses of former days.
Many Of these animals. though by no
means of the best physical frame,
would trot with heavy load behind
them for eight hours, at the rate of ten
miles an hour without turning a hair,
and this work they would continue to
DO for years without being sick or
sorry. Few gentlemen can say as
much for their carriage horses. No
horses, in fact, were in harder condi-
tiOn.
'On the other hand if exercise be
neglected, even for n few days in a
horse in high condition, he will put on
fat. He has been making daily the
large amount Of material needed to
sustain the consumption caused by his
work. II that work ceases suddenly
nature. will. Notwithstanding, continue
to supply the new material; and fat,
followed by plethora and frequently
by disease, will be the speedy conse.
quence."
The suburban citizen., 1902-09-06
Foster SeIERegueet,

Good roads foster proper self-re
Epect, both In the man who uses them
and the man who lives adjacent TO
them.
New Jersey Commissioner of Public
Roads. Bad roads are costing many
farmer much of the self-respect he
feels when driving along a good road
at good pace, with clean buggy, clean
harness and a clean horse
]. \. Mount, Ex-Governor of Indiana.
The man who lives surrounded with
good highways, who sees a good turn,
out going by driving rapidly, witt
handsomely dressed people in the con.
veyance, will think more quickly, has
more pride and Is apt TO catch inspira.
ton and become more active and
progressive.
w. w. Pendergast: TO sum up, a per
feet highway is thing Of beauty and
n joy forever. 1t blesses every home
by which il passes 1t brings into
pleasant communion people who other
wise would have remained at n per
petual distance. 1t awakens emulation
cements friendships and adds new
charm to social life. 1t makes the
region II traverses more attractive. the
residences more delightful; It stimu
lates n spirit Of genial improvement
Fields begin to look tidier, shabby
fences disappear, gardens grow fewer
weeds, lawns are better kept the
houses seem cOsier, trees are planted
along its borders. birds ill the air
with music, the world seems brighter
and the atmosphere purer. The coun
try is awake, patriotism revives. phil
anthropy blossoms as selfishness fades
and sinks from view. The school
house and the church feel the magic
iniuence-the wand Of progress has
touched even them; the old are young
again. the young see something new Il
live for, and TO all life seems worth
the living. The daily mail reachet
each nome. The rural cosmopolitau
feels the daily pulse of the world
Wheelmen are no longer confined &c
the cities. Bicycles, now within reach
Of all, are no strangers among farm
ers. The golden days Of which the
poets long have sung are upon them
The dreams Of the past are coming
true. Nothing can thwart the viii Oh
fate. Put your ear TO the ground even
now and you will hear the footballs of
good time coming"
The suburban citizen., 1902-09-06
The Retrent nrths n1noi.r.

The shrinking of the Swiss glaciers
is noted on many pages of Baedeker.
Some notes in a Swiss contemporary
show how rapidly the diminution is pro
ceeding. One glacier in particular ip
the Arolla Valley is declared to have
lost more than 500 yards in the last
quarter Of a century. NJ. Anzevln in.
deed, the well known hotel keeper. who
has spent every summer at Arolla
since 1850, expresses the opinion that
the famous Col de Colon will present
ly cease TO be glacier pass. Should
that happen II will be an interesting
reversion 10 the earlier state of things
The old chronicles of Evolena record
that in The Middle Ages the inhabitants
Of the valley used habitually to drive
their cattle over the pass to take them
TO market at Aosta.
The suburban citizen., 1902-09-06
vS0N@SSSS
S(6DSD S9||E 81 D
s ROADS,;
@SsT>~S S%SS
To Build Earth Roads.

NOTWITHSTANDING all that
has been done or proposed in
the way of road improve.
ment, the real problem for
The suburban citizen., 1902-09-06

Englishmen, and much more Amcri,
cans, would be horror stricken IL they
found themselves staggering under
such load of public debt as is weigh.
ing upon the Australian and the New
Zealander. The total population of
the Australian Commonwealth is only
3,175,000, or about half that of the
State of New York. Yet even two
years ago the total debt Of the six col
Onies now joined in the confederation
was $97O,OO0.O0O, exclusive Of def.
cheney bills, which would add thirty
or thirty-fve million dollars TO the ag
gregate. New Zealand, which in 1901
had but 10000 inhabitants, had in the
previous year a debt, including Treas.
ury and deficiency bills, of over $3.50
100000 TO appreciate the gravity of
these figures We need but to call to
mind the fact that, if the huge nation.
al debt Of Great Britain were as large
per head as that Of New Zealand, it
would be about three times its present
size. ....
The suburban citizen., 1902-09-06
A Prize For VIrtue.

A Prize Of Virtue" has been con-
ferred by the French Academy Oh Mile.
BonnefOis, who has devoted her life
TO the education OF the children who
live in booths and caravans. She goes
the rounds Of all the great fairs and
sets up her tent school among the
shows and circuses, doing an immense
amount Of good She is very popular
among her rough clients, young and
old.
The suburban citizen., 1902-09-06

a aS,.sH S~ L. ssStis "a q s~S.sssss rssss.
The suburban citizen., 1902-09-06


the next twenty-five years will con.
tinue TO he how to make good dirt
roads. Model roads, under the Hig,
bee.ArmstrOng act, or any other pos.
sible act, will not cover the State OF
New York with macadamized roads in.
side of seventy.five years. The change
will not he perceptible to the majority
Of farmers inside Of twenty-five years.
OF course. this kind of work should
be pushed forward with earnestness
and liberality. The trolley meanwhile
will 90 great ways to supplement
the macadam. but both together cannot
lift us out of the slough. We must
study the dirt road question, and not
consider it as of little Importance.
County engineers, taking charge under
the pay system, ought to make a solu.
tion of the question, which the old
pathmaster system did not and never
could have done. A good dirt road
could never be made by surface drain.
ing. Ii was no more possible-and
never will be possible-than TO make
dry meadows by surface draining.
The farmer knows that he must
underdrain his land, and do it thor.
oughly. But if you go into a highway
and drive a spade down in the middle
of your road you viii find that the
crust even in the dryest weather is
not more than six inches in thickness,
How, Iopc N roip win a. toI.o 20 eofia,
this or break it up entirely? The result
Is mud holes, and IN a wet spell almost
impossible roads, and this has been
the history of our country roads ever
since we took possession of the land
and laid them out. 1t would continue
to be the story forever under the
pathmastcr system. What is needed
Is undertaking as we'll as surface
draining. In some cases a main ditch
along the centre of the road, thorough.
ly laid in six or eight inch tile. would
he sufficient. In other cases it would
need the French system Of tile bitches
on each side. European model roads
have these deep bitches four feet deer
on each side Of the road, and I'm some
cases there is an additional ditch down
in the centre, all tiled and covered
The expense of such dirt road would
Of course, be vastly less than mac.
adam or telford road. and it would
pay for itself In the saving of a single
year to the farmers adjacent. There
could be no objection TO n thoroughly
well laid stone drain, where tile II
costly and stone plenty. In other
words, drain your roads as you drar
your meadows, and they will be pass
able driveways and haulways at all
seasons of the year. We note that
where trolleys are built they improve
the drainage, and do it with covered
drains,-E. r. Powell, Clinton, n. Y.
The suburban citizen., 1902-09-06

In the Archives des Sciences Physl'
ques ct Naturelles NJ. Brun sets forth a
theory of the causes of volcanic explo.
Eions based on the experiments Of NJ.
Gautier and himself. A few Of his re.
suits only can be referred TO here. They
have a direct bearing on the phenom.
eDa lately displayed in Martinique. His
experiments at Stromboli showed that
the lava flowing from the crater was
at a temperature not above 1890 de-
grees Centigrade, and that the explo.
siOns arise in the superficial layers.
Those Of NJ. Gauter prove that all
rocks of the earth's crust when heated
above redness give off gases, princi.
pally hydrogen. The hydrogen is the
principal cause Of the explosions.
Heated to about 1000 degrees in the
crater, it becomes explosive the mo.
ment it is mixed with air. A rock con.
taiSing four per cent. constituency
Of water is shown by calculation to
give of enough hydrogen to throw
twice its weight for a distance of three
miles. The results quoted indicate the
main lines Of the theory proposed. For
its full development the original paper
must be consulted.
The suburban citizen., 1902-09-06

In speaking to tie editor OF the Citi-
zen the other day Mr. Louis P. Shoe
maker, president OF the Brightwood
Citizens Association, said:
YOUR PAPER IS CERTAINLY
DOING GOOD WORK FOR THE
SUBURBS AND SUBURBAN PEO-
PIE. 1T is A GREAT PITY THE
OTHER PAPERS, TOO, DON'T
DEVOTE SOME SPACE TO OUR
INTERESTS"
The suburban citizen., 1902-09-06
The Beautiful Life.

To rise each morning with a thought
of God in the soul, left over 60 iii D
new mission from the night before
to kneel ere descending the stairs for
the conservation OF your life, and the
assurance Of His guidance OF you. just
for that day; this is the true preface
Of a beautiful life.
The Irish standard., 1902-11-29
ANTRIM.

A Belfast correspondent under date
Of Nov. 2, states that the Dowager
Warehouses of Dufferin and Ava is
in a low state of health, and has been
confined to bed. Since the death of
her husband she has lived much i'll
seclusion, and has become depressed.
There was little change in her condi-
ton up to last reports; but nothing
serious is anticipated.
CORK.
At the regular weekly meeting Of
the executive committee of the Cork
Exhibition, on October %. the Lord
Mayor of Cork, who presided, refer
red to the success Of the Exhibition
which was now coming to close, and
said that Immediately after the clos
ing of the present exhibition, they
should not let day pass without
setting to work and giving some evil
dence that they would have something
startling for 1908. In reply to Mr..
McMullen. who asked if the commit
tee had completed the purchase OF the
grounds as they intended for a pub
lie park, the Lord Mayor said that
they had had an agreement to that ef-
feet drawn up for considerable time
and that it would come into effect
long before the commencement OF the
new year. They had already secured
the whole of the grounds until Octo-
Der, 1904 and the western gardens will
he there next year.
CLARE.
There is to be public sworn in
quiry into the treatment and illness
The Irish standard., 1902-11-29

81 had no idea old Graspit was a
philanthropist until I saw him cir
culating a petition yesterday for the
purpose of raising money to enable a
poor widow to pay her rent" ooh,
Graspit is all right. He owns the
house the poor widow lives in"
The Irish standard., 1902-11-29

Bacon-He named his motor car af-
ter his wife. Egbert-How funny!
Bacon-Not at all funny After he
got it he found he couldn't control it,
The Irish standard., 1902-11-29

Miss Mary Garry; Vice pres., Miss Nellie
Moran; Rec. Sec, Miss Anna Delaney;
Treas, Mrs. T. ID. Dewitt: lns. sec., Miss
Katie Fallon; Fin. Sec, Miss Maggie KEEL
ley. Meets first Sunday OF month at 2:3O
p. m. and third Wednesday at 7:80 D. IN.
FILLMORE COUNTY.
Division No. 1, Observation-Disclosures
Mrs. 8. spillane; Vice Pres. Mrs. ID.
Lynch; Rec. Sec, Marie Mccormick; Fin.
Sec, Nellie RAFFERTY,; Treas. Maggie Raj.
ferty; Ins. Sec. Mrs. Frayne.
HBNNHPIN COUNTY.
County President-Mrs. NJ H. Cummings
2720 14th av. 8.
Division No. 1, Minneapoiis-Prestden
Miss Mary Boylan, 1898 18th av g.; Vice
Pres, Mrs Miles, 10 9Th Ut. ~; Rec. sec.,
MIS-. J. Mulvihill, TOT Univerxity av. N E.;
Fin. Sec, Miss Mary Garvey, 1901 LIST st.
s.; Treas, Mrs. Dean, 8148 Bloomington
Av. Ins. Sec, Mrs. Mary Mogan, PALS 18th
av. 8. Meets first and third Friday even
ings OF month, at A. o. u. w. hall. 10 s.
7th at.
Division No. 2, Mlnneapolis-President
Mrs. r. l.. Collins, 8O5 End st. N. f.: Vice
Pres, Mrs. Ellen Munson, $50 Quincy st.
N. e.; Rec. Sec, Mrs. Frank Sullivan, 759
Washington st. N. e.; Fin. Sec, Mrs. Mary
Turner, 1918 Jefferson st. N. f.; Treas,
Mrs. Tierney, 221 9th av. N. E.; ms. Sec,
Miss Moic Callahan. 7s9 Wash ST. ~ f. chair
man Committee on Sick, Mrs. Leonard, 428
"a ST.. N. d.; Medical Examiner, DR.. X. p.
O'Brien, Res. 7O1 4th st. ~ e.; Office. COS
NicOllet av. Meets second and fourth
Thursday evenings Of month at o. q.
w. hnll, 225 Central av.
Division No. 3, MinneapOlla--President.
Mrs. James Best 825 9th st. ~. Vice Pres,
Mrs. Agnes Kehoe, 725 Bradford nv. NJ;
Rec. Sec, Mrs. J. Rice. 2O23 Bryant av. NJ;
Fin Sec. Mrs. g. w. Gilen 1n00 4th at.
NJ; ms. Sec, Mrs. Mary i. McBreen. OA
| AldrIch av. NJ: Treas, Mrs W. L. Harold.
1927 18th av. N. Meets nrst and third
| Tuesday evenings Of ench month ut corner
| Of 10Th sv N. and Washington.
| Division No 4. Observation-Disclosures
} Mrs ] Foley 1920 u. ed ct: Vice Pro-.