Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1902-11-22
#tisteltanepus Readima.
PLAIN LANGUAGE FOR A TURK.
A Time When Rear Admiral Kirk
land Freed His Mind.

PLAlN LANGUAGE t'OH "A TUHh.
A Time When Rear Admiral Kirk
land Freed His Mind.
when the Armenian troubles were
at their height few years ago." said
a naval paymaster, my ship, the San
Francisco, flagship Of the Mediterra-
mean squadron, carrying Admiral Kirk
lands bit Of bunting, dropped her an
chor in the harbor Of the most import
ant seaport town in one of the main
provinces of Turkey In Asia. The idea
in anchoring there was not alone to kill
time, but also to give the engineers a
chance to do some overhauling requir-
ed by the machinery.
After the ship had been swinging
to her mudhook for an hour or so. a
gayly caparisoned shore boat came off
from the beach, bearing messenger
from the Vail, or Turkish governor Of
the province. He was in full Turkish
uniform, this messenger, and he jab-
bered at the gangway for some time
before the officer of the deck thought
Of sending for Lieutenant Ward, the
champion linguist Of the American
navy, who was then attached to the
San Francisco.
Ward had often exhibited his skill
as linguist and had won renown for
his knowledge of the obscure lan-
guages. What Ward couldn't do with
any old language, living or dead and
buried, from ancient Carthaginian
down to the coon French Of Louisiana,
wasn't worth doing.
$50 the officer Of the deck sent for
out of this violently gesticulating per-
son in the baggy, gilt-embroidered
trousers at the gangway. 1t was some
thing easy for Ward, talking Arabic
was, and in no time he had the Wallis
messenger reduced to smiles with his
Turkish jokes.
1.-THE messengers message was the
simplest thing in life. He simply bore
the respects of the Vail, who would be
pleased to visit the San Francisco him
self on the following day. with the gra-
cious admirars invitation, etc.
"All Of this was carried aft to Admir-
al Kirkland, Of course, and also, Of
course, the bluff old gentleman replied
that he'd be delighted to receive his
Vali-ship on board the San Francisco
on the following afternoon.
"Well, the Vail, gorgeous as the East
ern star in his clothes and jeweled de-
corations, came off to the San Fran
cisco, attended by his suite, on the fol-
lowing afternoon. The Vail was a good
looking Turk with a shrewd eye In his
head, and he was the quintessence and
tintype Of courtesy and grace.
"He spoke only in Turkish. and Of
course, Lieut.. Ward had to be sum-
moned in interpret his talk to the ad-
miral. At the gangway the Vail ex-
pressed his appreciation of the nobility
Of Admiral Kirkland as exhibited by
the admiral's gracious invitation, and
got off lot Of other taffy like that,
which Lieut.. Ward faithfully trans
lated. Then the Vail was conducted
aft to the admiral's cabin, where, with
the assistance Of Dragoman Ward, the
bluff old sea-dog and the Turkish gov
ernor settled down for a talk.
"Now, ought to say that Admiral
kirkland didn't have bit Of use IN
the world for a Turk, and he was also
pretty sore at this time over the Ar
menian massacres. He would have
liked to have permission from this
government to waltz into the harbor
of Constantinople and to blow that
town fiat to the ground, and what's
more, he often said so right out loud.
SOS he could be heard. So that he
didn't feel particularly honored over
this visit of the Vail man, big gun as
the latter was.
1.-THE Vail, Admiral kirkland and
Lieut.: Ward sat down at one Of the
admirals table for a talk.
"'Ward,' said Admiral Kirkland to
his interpreter, you can tell that
beady-eyed Individual across the table
he looks as If he had murder in his
heart, like all the rest Of his tribe
that if had my way about it I'd keel
haul every blithering mothers son of a
Turk that wears hair; you tell him
that, Ward and the admiral gazed
as graciously as you like at the pleased
looking Vail.
1.-The august admiral translated
Ward to the bowling Vail. desires me
to tender to your excellency the assur-
ances of his most devoted and solicit
Gus consideration
"Whereupon the Vail bowed his
thanks and smiled.
Ibid you tell the curmudgeon that
Ward?' inquired the bluff old admir-
aired Bill Kirkland, as the sailors
affectionately called him. All right
Now you can just tell him that If these
massacres continue, I'll be swuzzled II
I won't some day forget my orders, or
at any rate, get away from cable COM
munication, and find some preteXt to
hammer a few Turkish towns. Tell
him that, Ward-tell the black-browed
runt that, lieutenant, if you'll be so
kind and the admiral, with his face
wreathed in gracious, mellow smiles.
bowed respectfully in the direction OF
the Vail.
1.-The most august admiral, trans
lated Lieut.. Ward, desires me to con-
vey to your excellency the hope that
your present station is one of unending
happiness for you and your-er-fam-
ily, and to express the earnest hope