The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1902-07-31
When Barker
Moved ~ ~
By CLARA AUGUSTA.

not closet was at least two sizes smaller
than Mrs. Green's. She and Mrs.
Green are rivals. They have been rivals
all their lives. When they were girls
they both wanted the same man, and
he had to marry the Widow Bent in
self-defense. He said he felt that with
the widow at the helm he could defy
the world.
Mrs. Green lives in the neighborhood,
and she has kept Nency stirred up for
Is years. If Mrs. Green gets a new
bonnet, Nancy gets hat. If Nancy has
a fresh table-cloth, Mrs. Green has a
new set of napkins. If Mrs. Green
washes four sheets on Monday, Nancy
washes six the following Monday. And
vice versa. Yes, always vice versa.
Mrs. Green has a lawn and back
yard big enough for "a hen-coop. Nancy
vowed that she'd have lawn, too, and a
backyard sufficient for two hen-coops.
She wanted an attic. She wanted
view of the park. She wanted to be
where she could see the reservoir pond.
She wanted back stairs. She wanted
double parlors. She wanted three win
dows in the kitchen. In fact. she want
ed so many things that we had to move.
II ever you've moved, you know what
It is.
For four days we eat on the head of
-four barrel, and our food was mostly
bakers stuff.
We had loaf of sponge cake on the
table SO many times that it seemed like
an old friend. Inearly shed tears when
Nancy proposed breaking it up and
converting it into pudding.
"Silas,' said Nancy, the day before
we were to be loaded up, there's the
cat to be disposed of. 1t amt lucky to
move cat, and besides cat won't stay
in new place unless you grease its
feet with butter and keep it down cellar
for at least week. And with butter
80 cents pound, and strong at that,
l don't feel justified in wasting it
greasing cats feet
"Good land, Nancy" said I, 81 never
could kill cat! Especially Priscilla.
Why. she's been with us ten years, and
she's like human. You can't expect
me to kill her, Nancy?"
Don't be fool, Silas Barker" said
the partner of my bosom, with empha-
sis. IF couldn't kill cat I'd-Pd-
put my head in soak, and see if it
wouldn't timber up my brains!"
You can kill her. Nancy" said I,
feeling a great wave of generosity
sweep over me. "I'll go down town and
see about the coal, and you can fix her
while I'm gone"
"Silas Barker" said my wife, with an
air OF majestic dignity. "don't talk like
tool! Killing cats is outside of a
woman's sphere. What did I marry
you for? Was it that might kill your
cats for you, and
"It's your cat, Nancy" saidI.
NO, indeed" said she, ''it's yours.
You got it to catch your rats"
Its yours" said I; sit came from
your relations over to Four Corners,
and you got it to catch your mice,
and"
ITS no cat of mine!" said Nancy, de-
cidedly. "You go right out now and
borrow Stacy's gun and shoot it while
its eating milk. Shooting is the most
humane way, they say. to kill cat"
Good gracious, Nancy!" said I. 81
haven't fired gun since 1s67-4th of
July, and she burst and blowed me
into the middle of next week, and set
Mendon's barn afire''
We'll, you amt going to use that
gun" said Nancy, calmly. "Stacy's gun
is all right. It was in the war of the
revolution. You go right out now and
get it, and have the business over.
when things to be done. believe in
doing it,"
When Nancy sets her foot down,
Whatever she wants has to be done, or
tnere is serious disturbance in the do
nestle atmosphere. So, very reluctant
y, must confess, went over to
Stacy's and borrowed his gun.
Be careful of her." said Stacy, "she
Kicks, and she's apt to miss fire, and
.hen again she's so ticklish about her
Trigger that she's liable to go off any
manute without warning. You've got
to be considerable sarcumspect with
her" Win
50 took the gun and proceeded to
oe sarcumspect" with it. I laid it care
Iully on the top of the wood pile and
ssiled to Nancy to bring on the cat
ana put it on the fence so that could
take sight at it.
Nancy got the cat, but somehow
rrisciila seemed to scent mischief, and
sus oeeilned to remain to be sighted at.
Inen | resolved to shoot her on the
wing. and as she was clawing UP over
ne,ghbor Jones "short part" seized
the gun. and before l could take aim
'ne tnlng went off with crash that
"ouid have walked dead man. if he
nasn,t been dead so long that there
wasn't enough of him to wake. When
ne smoke cleared away 1 found nv
n islng on my back in the heap of
-. dshes at my back door, and the
was sitting on soap box, washing
es 1eet and attending to other de-