The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1902-07-03
49, x
1tI)oeSfER&Slg

MIS-. my NY uuspdnu say } tHut
am one woman In thousand. Mrs
Doyle Aren't yon jealous OF the 03D?
New York Sun.
Cause for Worry Aunt Sadie fear
Robert Is an awfully careless fellow;
| heard him say that he dropped 5000
on the street yesterday Brooklyn
Life.
Eff Gabrul WIZ ter blow his trumpet
ter-morrer. some er de fault finders
would rise en- tell i'm dat his musical
eddieation had been neglected. Attain
Ia Constitution.
Upgardson-Among the fraternity OF
professional musicians consider
Atom Fraternity of professional mu-
Chicago Tribune.
Borem-Sow. what would you do II
you were In my shoes, Miss Cuttingf
Miss CuttIng-I'd point the toes to-
ward the front door and give them
start.-Chicago News.
He-Allss Wadsworth is rather man.
nish, isn't she? e-Exceedlnsly
Why. she'd rather pay cents more for
an article than 90 into department
store to buy lt.-Puek.
whats wreck. pop?" "A wreck.
my son, is a disaster on the water"
Not always. pop; there's old Rednose;
he's a wreck. but water had nothing
to do with it."-Yonkers Statesman.
Mr.. Kawdle-I wish you wouldn't in
terrupt me every time try to say
something. Do | ever break In when
you are talking? Mrs. Kawdle-No.
you wretch! You 20 to sleep.-Tit-
Bits.
Have the letters been duly exam
ined by the handwriting expert ?" Yes,
your honor" Very well; let the
handwriting expert now be examined
by the insanity expert. Ohio State
Journal.
Boarder (warmlyl-Oh, know every
one OF the tricks of your trade. Do
you think | have lived In boarding
houses twenty years for nothingf
Landlady 0rigidly)--l shouldn't be at
all surprised.
visitor-What are you crying about,
my little man? Little Willie-All my
brothers have holidays. and have
none. Visltor-Why, that's too bad
How is it? Willie between sobsJ-l
don't go to school yet.
A conductor said in tone of great
severity to a passenger who was max
Ing considerable disturbance on a car:
Remember, sir. that you are on a pub
lie vehicle, and you must behave as
such.-Lipplneott's Magazine.
"Yes, am opposed to American girls
marryin' furriners." said old Mrs.
Slpes. I'm just that opposed to 1t
that If my girls can't marry people OF
their own sex they needn't marry at
all. and that's all there is about it,"
FIanugau-III,rus, man, rs------'- a..
matther wild yer face? flanagan
Faith, twas an accident The ould
woman throwed plate at me. Fiana-
gan-An' dye call that an accidentt
Hanagan-Ay coorse, Didn't she hit
phwat she aimed at?
Hojack-My wife only writes to me
once n week while she Is away. Tom
dik-Nine writes regularly three times
week. Hojack-She must be very
fond OF you. Tomdlk-She Is; and
then only send her money enough TO
last two days at time.
A Question of Privilege: Mistress
after heated discussion with argu-
mentative cookl-Are you the mistress
of this house. | should like to know
Cook-No. ma'am, | ain't.-but-"
Mistress (triumphantly)- don't
talk like an idiot!-Punch.
did you git anything" whispered
the burglar on guard as his pal emerg.
ed from the window. Nav, de bloke
wot lives here Is lawyer" replied the
other In disgust. Oats hard luck, =
replied the first; did you lose any
ring?"-OhIo State Journal.
Sharpe-On his birthday before their
marriage she gave him book entl-
tied "A Perfect Gentleman" Wheaton
Any change after year of married
life? Sharpe-ies; on his last birth
day she gave him book entitled
wild Animals | Have Met. Tit Bits.
Intimate Frlend-The assessor hasn't
listed your property at one-tenth OF
what 1t Is worth? Then why don't
YOU Increase your assessment Volun-
tarily? Millionaire did that last
year. and everybody said | was max
ing a grand stand play for popularity.
Chicago Tribune.
Lieutenant ito his orderly Bring me
a beefsteak and poached egg. Orderly
Excuse me, lieutenant. but haven {
you forgotten that you are to dine to-
night at Countess Stlngely's? Iieuten-
ant-That SO. had forgotten Il.
Bring me two beefsieaks and TWO
poached eggs.-Ex.
Mike" said Flooding Pete. I'm
goin to join one o. desc here forestry
associations" whats DEM inquIr-
ed Meandering Mike "Dey're TO pre-
vent de destruction of de forests An
1t jes' happened 10 hit me dat II people
could be stopped from enttin' down
trees dey're wouldn't be no more wood
to split Washington Star.
Long Say. Short, I'D like TO have
that $40 you borrowed OF me three
months ago. hort-Sorry. old man.
but cant give it to you at the pres
ent writing I.ong-But you said you
wanted il for little while only Short