The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1902-05-30
IT LACKED NOVELTY
A COLLECTION or HElRLooMs THAT
WeARlED AN OBSERVER.
The system of Renting Ont Family
Glory and Supplying Ancestral
Trappings mt So Much Per Hour
Has Its Drawbacks.

Has Its Drawbacks.
Two guests were being shown through
Philadelphia mansion In which
nouveau richie broker was entertaining
a party Of fashionable friends. The
| splendid array Of family heirloOms, all
| bespeaking a lineage Of earliest colo
nlal origin, deeply impressed one OF the
| party. lie was a stranger but lately
| arrived from Baltimore. oddly enough,
| his companion, n Philadelphian, seem
| ed nippantly Indifferent TO these treas
ured relics OF familys honored his
tory.
Remarkable collection OF helrlooms
our hosA has" remarked the stranger
as he stopped before a battle SCARED
sword Of Revolutionary days.
eyes" drawed the Philadelphia
cynically, Every interesting But un-
fortunately II lacks the charm Of nov.
city for me. Already this season I've
seen the same batch Of relics In three
other philadelphia houses"
"IIow could that bcr
"Oh, simple enough. II only means
that all four families. our host and the
three others | refer to, hired their an
cestral trapplngs from the same man"
"Hlred them|
eyes, hired them. We have In this
city an entcrprlsing collector OF colo.
NAL Junk who makes business or
renting out family glory to all who
were unfortunate enough 10 be born
without IT,"
"Wheww was the only comment the
astOnished Baltlmorcan could utter.
And doubtless many Philadelphans
would be moved TO say "Whew" IL
they could learn how many members
of the Quaker City social elect are con
strained to seek the assistance Of the
heirloom dealer when they wish to
give brilliant function.
It il deception that is forced upon
them for unless you have distinguish
ed appearing forbears you stand little
chance Of penetrating the sacred pre-
cincts Of the local fashionable set.
Ancestry. not cash, is the open ses-
anne, and even II n man can claim some
sort Of family tree his prctensions are
the furnitare or portraits that his
American forefather brought with him
on the Maynower or the Welcome.
or course If the two vessels named
had been as large as the Great Eastern
and had been loaded with nothing but
heirlooms they couldn't have carried
half the stock needed TO launch the de-
Il - rnf inf az
clety. Hence the need Of an heirloom
dealer.
He has his warerooms I'm Pine street,
In part OF the city which was once
the center of fashion, but Is now de-
serted by that element In consequence
of the westward movement OF the city's
elect.
Ostenslbly he Is n curio dealer, but
mis- revenue Is mainly derived from
furnishing and hanging the walls OF
fashionable dwellings with century old
portraits.
This clever manipulation OF mems
vanties has ancient. straight backed
furniture and copper kettles and snuff
ers for candles and bullseye watches
and similar relics OF ancient grandeur,
all at your disposal for n night, when
you, poor fellow, with money, but no
ancestors, want your friends to know
what an old family yours is! He also
has rare furnishings for libraries and
drawing rooms which you may rent IL
you have the price.
1t matters not from what pnrt of the
country the applicant halls or what
particular descent he wishes to claim.
his needs are promptly flied.
For those who wish to pose as lincal
descendants Of the stanch old colonial
patriots who fought the stamp tax and
dehed the power of King George ut
Bunker Hill and drew up the Declara-
ton there Is especially attractive stock.
For the naughty cavalier who "came
over with Lord Delaware there are
costumes and furniture and portraits
of more elaborate style, as befits the
past OF emigrants who In England
basked I'm the favor OF the king and
were participants in brilliant court GER
emonials.
The Quaker City allegiance to the
honored memory OF William Penn Is
sentiment that the curio dealer has
been careful 10 cherish.
On his walls he has portraits OF stu
dlous looking Quakers. ON his shelves
are modest Quaker clocks that did
service in the days when the founder
was exchanging thirty blankets for
Philadelphia.
There are Quaker walking sticks, TIN
der boxes, documents on all subjects,
household utensils n legion.
IL is true that this system OF supply
ing ancestors has its disadvantages.
Contretemps such rs the one revealed
at the beginning of this article are
bound 10 occur. The hawklike eye OF n
connolsseur. trained to recognize In
stantly the value, authenticity and his
tory of antiques, often picrccs the de-
cepton and remembers seeing the
treasured family helrlooms' some
where else. But I'm the main people
are gullib'e, and the wealthy but pie
beian aspirant for social honors vaunts
the blucncss OF his blood and points
with pride TO his hired heirlooms with
out much danger OF discovery.
And meanwhile the crafty Pine
street dealer smiles, wakes rich and
echoes a celebrated remark OF Puck's
regarding the average intelligence OF
,,nrtois nhfioIDinhio North Ampri.