News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1902-01-29

| heavenp The boy replied: Yes; yor
would have cut devil of figure in
| heaven looking through blind bride
wouldn't you?' That's the way Dem
ocrat would look voting the Republican
ticket under any circumstances, con
| cluded the governor.
| Won on His Looks.
| Governor Ball is the only man l ever
knew who made political capital out OF
| his lack of beauty. AS everybody
| knows, Governor Dockery is a large
| handsome man. The Globe-Democrat
some years ago declared that he was
'the most pulchritudinOus member OF
| the Missouri delegation in congress.
| Ball is a small, wiry man, not especial.
| ly handsome, not very ugly In his
speeches he magnifies his ugliness for
the humor of the thing. He says: Not
long since | was up at Pleasant Hill
campaigning. l didn't know a soul in
the town. So | started out to get ac-
quainted. The first man ! met was a
tall, good looking man. | walked up to
him and said: Good morning, sir. My
name is Ball Dave Ball?' the stran-
ger asked. Yes; Dave Ball of Pike
What! Are you the man who is running
for GOVERNOR Yes; l am the man.
The tall one looked down on me for a
moment and said, Well, III be ever
lastingly homswaggled" After having
relieved himself in that way and re-
covered from his surprise he took me
oil 70 ind tn bD
entire population"
DR.. Buckner's Question.
1t takes man of infinite good ma
tUre and an exquisite sense of the ri
diculous to relate an anecdote in public
when the point is against himself. This
Ball delights to do. In Pike county
lives a man of great intellectual bril-
liancy named DR.. Samuel W. Buckner.
He is a brother to Judge a. II. Buck
ner, who for 2 years represented this
district in congress with signal ability.
DR.. Bucllner Is decidedly absentmind-
ed. He and Ball are great cronies.
In his stump speeches he relates this
ludicrOus incident: One day as Dr.
BuCkner and were walking along the
street told him | was thinking of
being a candidate for lieutenant gov
ernCr and asked him what he thought
Of it. He seemed to take to the idea
and said: 1 would advise you to run.
The pay is gl,2d. the position honorable
and the dutiCt light Then for several
minutes he walked along in a brown
study, utterly. oblivious to all terrestri-
al things. AT last he stopped and look
ed me sQuarely in the face. | asked
him what he was studying about. He
replied, 4 wm just thinking that if you
were elected lieutenant governor and
the governor happened to die what a
devil of fix the state would be i'm
Always His Second Choice.
The greatest fight for high Office ever
made by an old man in the history of
this world was that of Thomas Hart
Benton when he appealed to the people
and ran for governor of Missouri in
1856. At the advanced age of 10 he
Travelled daF and night and capvassed
the entire state. That was before the
days of railroads, and it was a colossal
undertaking. The old statesman laid
on and spared not His enemies adopt
ed his tactics and raised him at his
own game. They were a multitude.
Even men who never dreamed of meet
ing him in debate took an occasional
shot at him at point blank range.
Up in Rails at that time there lived
man who was as great a character in
his way as Benton was in his. He was
universally known as Honest John"
Hawkins. and his wit was proverbial
throughout his own bailiwick.
One hot day Colonel Benton was
speaking to vast multitude under the
trees in the courthouse square at New
London. Honest John" Hawkins was
lying on the grass listening. He sud
denly rose in the midst of the great eX-
senator's speech and at the top of his
voice yelled, Tom Benton has been my
second choice for governor of Missouri
for 80 years" Benton stopped and,
May | inquire who is your first
choice" ANY man in the state who
can beat Colonel Benton" shouted
Honest john" to the amazement of
the audience. Honest John" hit the
bulls eye that time dead sure pop.
A New Way of Getting Elected.
Impossible as the performance may
seem and unprecedented as it undoubt-
edly was, one Pike county statesman
made his calling and election to COW
eted Office sure by withdrawing from
the race to secure it.
In 1882 Judge John A. Mackey, Judge
William A. Gum and Mr.. J. ID. Pitt
were having redhot three cornered
fight for representative in the legisla-
ture. For weeks they made house to
house canvass. One fine morning, to
the surprise of all, Judge Gum an
nounced his retirement from the race.
He did this in perfect good faith. There
was no trick about it. He had simply
grown weary of the contest. All the
newspapers came out in double loaded
editorials praising Judge Gum to the
skies and setting forth in extenso his
many admirable qualifications for the
place. Some of the editors wrote with
ghoulish glee on the principle de NOR
tuiS nil nisi bonum and expected their