The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1902-08-01
A TENDERFooT IN KANSAS.
,Rebufrs Which Made New Yorker
Who Wanted to BE Agreeable
Feel Cheap.


SIT is not always necessary to
throw bouquets when you are out
dining said New York travelling
man, according to the Sun. when L
was in Kansas town not long ago l
was invited to the home of custom
er to take dinner. A travelling man
never permits himself to misunder-
stand an invitation to eat home
dinner.
"My customers wife was one of
those matter-of-fact, common-sense
women to whom a primrose is
primrose, whether it grows by the
rivers brim or in the barnyard. Soon
after / was seated at her daintily
spread table l began fumbling around
for something of a gracious brand to
launch which would show my appre-
citation of her hospitality.
81 opened on butter. 1t was worth
travelling miles to taste such butter
as that on her table! | said few
nice things about New York, of
course, we all do that, but I admitted
that there was no such butter in New
York as l found on her table.
''She couldn't understand that, for
the butter l was tasting was from a
firlSin sent her by express by her aunt
in Herkimer county. just then
happened to think of story and the
butter incident was relegated
"We had got down to peas and
allowed that there were no peas like
the homegrown kind. 1t added to
the lusciousness of the pea to watch
it grow and Gull it from the vine.
''She thought otherwise. Her peas
had been a failure ever since the
grasshoppers did her gardening last
year, and George-that was her hus-
bands name-had bought canned
jeas ever since. had been throwing
tulips at canned peas!
81 think l said something about the
weather, just then. That's what a
man coughs up when he goes against
the rocks. You would think after a
throwdown or two such as l have
mentioned that / would have confined
myself to the monosyllabic. And I
would had not the little woman spok-
en- of the wild goose she served.
"'At least she said, in a splendid
way. we can offer you in this some
thing you don't often have in New
York
''Of course. Allowing much in New
York's favor. ] must say that the goose
we get in the metropolis is a pretty
tame bird. I admitted this. And then
i cut loose on the delicious meat of
the fowl that honks.
81 could conceive of no sport like
that of hunting the wild goose. Then
il quoted something from 'Hiawatha'
about the wawa-Longfellow for wild
goose, you know.
81 said her husband must be a
mighty hunter. Of course, it is only
in the great open country that the
'wawa can be hunted, I said. I got a
second round of wawa. and felt quite
satisfied at last that / had hit the
right trail. Then the little woman,
looking at me with her gray eyes,
said:
"T think we are indebted to Mr..
Edison or some one of his school for
the dish we are enjoying. Recently.
quite recently. our modest little city
has been lighting the streets with cleo
tricity.
SIN the night, when the sky is over
cast, these lights seem to attract the
great focks of wild geese that pass
this way, and when they get into a
radius of the lamps they become con-
fused, and even the boys kill them
with clubs.
THE wild goose we have this even
ing is quite modern. 1t was indirectly
killed by electric light
"Well, it was to laugh. There was
nothing else to do. didn't feel like it,
but laughed. And so lifted my COB
let and proposed the health of my
hostess in the pure, sparkling liquid
which only Kansas could produce"