Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1902-06-21
SECONDHAND NEWS

Most men like to get the news of the day
out of their papers at first hand. They
enjoy working their way through the pages
of a newspaper that is all fallow to them.
They feel that the full effect of the world S
daily happenings is blunted or lost UPON
them when the printed news concernir9
the same Is carelessly dished out to them
by word Of mouth. But the feminine mind
seems to be quite unable to perceive why
this should be so. Mr.. Howmild of Capitol
Hill has frequently ventured to gently ex-
postulate with Mrs Howmild over her fix I'd
habit of garrulously hashing the headline
news out Of the paper-"eating the heart
out OF it, and making it just like yester-
days sheet to me-" he expresses it-before
he has chance to get hold of 1t, but his
tfmid protests are futile. The paper boy
throws The Star into the Howmild area
while the Howmtlds are at dinner IN the
basement dining room. and Mrs. Howmilo
always goes after it herself. Then, re-
seating herself at the dinner table. she
spreads the paper out, and, while her I'M
something in this wise:
Dear me, that poor old Mr.. Longdays is
dead at last-he must have been hundred
years old If he was day-he was an old
man when I was little bit Of thing IN
Georgetown. And that poor Mrs. Brown
ison Is dead, too-cancer, you know-ever
SO many years. certainly must go there
tomorrow. Um-um. here's the announce
ment of that Rickashaw girls marriage to
that Pickapenny fellow-they were married
over In Alexandria way last November, 1t
seems. and they're only just announcing it
high time. it seems 10 me. Oh, dear me,
there's going to be a bargain sale tomor-
row of dimities, only cents a yard, and
l certainly do need two or three more wash
dresses-you must let me have a little
money tomorrow and I'll go down and get
the goods.
Here are some nice serge suits for men,
advertised at 1890. l should think you
would get one of them, instead of paying
$50 for serge suit as you always do, and
they all crinkle up In no time, don't they?
Mercy on us! What's all this talk in the
papers lately about sugar and Cuban reci-
procity and all that? 1t says here that
there's a big fight on among the senator's.
They don't actually fight, do they? 1 should
think they're old enough to know better,
and they look dignifed, too. M-m-m!
More about that old canal. It's wonder
they don't just go ahead and decide on the
kind of canal they want and then dig the
old thing, isn't it? Oh, they've found the
bodies Of that New York girl and the young
man who took her out rowing at midnight.
1t Is supposed they were both done away
with by one of the young mans rivals.
Funny time of night for young people to go
out rowing 1 wonder what kind of moth
ers daughters have over in New York, any
way? 1t says here that Heno is the ia
vorite for the American Derby at Chicago
What is the favorite-the prettiest horse
1t says here that that unfortunate Mr.. CO.
qupick Is very low with Brights disease.
It's hard to have to say it, but that man
certainly has been drinking himself to
death for years Volcanoes active In Ha-
waii-now. isn't it a wonder that folks'n go
right on living in such horrid places where
they are liable to be smothered by nasty
old volcano any minute? Panama hats
advertised here for $30-the nerve of some
people to expect a man to pay all that for
hat! Well, 1 do wish they'd settle this
old Philippine business. whatever it is. and
give US rest King Edward is sick
gracious sakes alive. it's a wonder he isn't
sick all the time. from all that we've heard
about him! It's been raining steadily in
London for month-oh, now l know why
that Ohjee pinhead has been wearing his
trousers turned up all the time. Well If
that silly Forgeahead hasn't been promoted
to eighteen hundred in the patent office.
and he hasn't got enough sense to come in
out of the wet, I do declared Listen to
thfs-'Mrs. Miggsley and Miss Miggsley
have gone to Atlantic City for the
summer. and right among the society
notes, too! Well. we'll. so that Long
wait girl has got married at last, the
poor, skinny thing. and they say the
old man she's married-he must be
seventy at least-has just loads and loads
Of money. Oh, there's going to be special
sale of silk stockings tomorrow at" etc.
etc. until Mrs. Howmild finally losses the
shredded and dismantled paper turned in
side out. over to Mr. Howmild, and by the
time he gets hold of it it seems as old to
him as piece of scaIloped neWsDaper cum
board shelf covering.