New-York tribune., 1902-02-09
, VASSAR LUNCHEON.
MARK TWAIN A GUEST OF THE ALUNGN Il
ASSOCIATION-HE TALKS ON CIR
CUMSTANTIAL EVIDENCE.

A variety Of accusations were brought against
women by Mark Twain at the annual iuncheon OIL
Nassar Aumnse Association. held at Demohico ;
yesterday. Mr.. Clem2ns's subject was 'Clrcum-
stantial Evidence and in a characteristic treat
ment he showed that such evidence Is not always
to be depended upon. although at times it leads 10
the truth. For example. he said. when you see
woman towing around a long. low dog with far
spreading that plagiarism on the claw
feet of antique furniture. there is circumstantiaI
evidence that that woman has got a good hetrt'
and lot of tines that she can't dispose of 1t.
When YOU see a coming down the pier
wearing a horizon filing smile. smile of supreme
satisfa con and of ecstasy, there is circumstances
evidence that that woman has been smuggling
There is nothing that raises a woman TO such il
point of ecstasy and satisfaction as the CONSCIOUS
ness of having smugged. Whenever any woman
looks you In the eye feelingy and says that she
considers smuggling sin. you may be sure theIe II
something wrong with that wOman's brain, for
woman is a natural smugger, and 1t would take
her a good while to live doHn the reputation
Then take the case Of the pencil. When you see
anv pencil sharpened by any woman there Is CIT
cImstantiaI evidence that she did the work WIN
her teeth although in all probability she used a
knife for the purpose. No woman can sharpen /"
lead pencil well.
Mr. Clemens explained that he had chosen his
tonic because Of its 'innocuous character He had
thought Of missionaries and the Filipino war as
subjects about which to talk, but. although no
would have liked to do SO. he retralned Tor ue
sake of peace.
Mrs Mary G. Trask president of the association
who presided. had recalled, in introducing MI.
| Clemens his expression of grief at the grave OF
Adam In reply the speaker said that althouen
thirty years had passed since that time his venera
tion for that most distant ancestor had not Wane'
| nor had the emotion which he felt at that grave
cooled. 49,
DR. John s Billings head of the New orh RE- RE-
Public library in a speech Dissa ustictl"n'
I'D that n ia not well 10 rejoice in prosperity long
| seldom more than week. 1t is stimulating as
satiefaction that moves things. Librarians always
| bevo caueo for dissatisfaction. More books are
u.ed or NOR readers or different books. or diff
! ferent readers or more room. etc. Even with us
| ~or,isod building and numerous branches the pun
| lie library Of this city is not satisfied II wants
considerably more interest taken by citizens Aho
| esncCiaIlv by the women in the way the various
| libraries will be and managed. Ut. hl''31
| reca1,ad MIR CarncgIe's demand for an exceptional
| man for IT, and said that exceptional women "ouu
! be equally welcome
! DR. James r Taylor. president OF \aSsar 'oleEe'
smoke from what he called the business end Of
the matter" He urged renewed effort on the part
Of the assocalo in not only raising money Tor
the institution but IN keeping before New orK
the importance and advantages of its work is
! Vassar College he said, exertng all the influence
that It ought upon New-York City, and is the col
lege in turn getting from the city all the returns
! that fl should?
Every one reioces in the progress made by
R,rnard Situated. rs it IS in the city, it appeals
strongly 10 it, but it will never be true that the
m, ioritv Of girls from New-York will seek their
education there. The greatest number will 90
| from home. The demand he said, is for broad edu-
cation in distinction from specific education. For