The Savannah morning news., 1902-08-30

said his sister. HE is always doing the
most absurd things. He forgot me in a
restaurant In Boston not long ago, and
never remembered that / was in his
charge until he was on the lightning
express for New York. We were both
coming back from Harvard together
from the annex and he FROM the col
lege-and he had the money and the
tickets We went together to the -
for luncheon, after which he left me to
get a cigar. l waited and waited. and
no Harry, until finally | imagined what
had really happened-i. e., that after
purchasing his cigar he had entirely
forgotten that 1 was with him and
had gone to the railroad station. Leav-
ing word with the waiter, IN case he
should return to fetch me, l rushed TO
the station and found that our train
had gone, then back again to the res
taurant, where, as l had expected, no
Harry had sErned up. AS l had only
so cents in my purse, | spent part OF
1t in telegraphing an explanatory mes
sage to mamma, and with the rest re-
turned to Cambridge, where 1 found
telegram from Harry which he man
aged to get sent from the train. Did
you worry| ] asked him afterward.
oh, not bit!' he answered cheerful
ly I knew you would be all right, but
was glad the mater received your
telegram before / arrived home.
The "Reminiscences of a certain
well-known professor led to an anus
ing scene the other day, He was
walking along a quiet street when, on
turning a corner, he came upon his
friend DIR. P.
1t was a warm day, and DR.. P
was standing with his hat held up
side down in his left hand while with
his rfChf he uinad hiq nprgnffing
countenance. The professor his eyes
on the ground, dimly perceived the
motionless figure. He stopped, num-
bled something, thrust a thumb into
his waistcoast pocket. and dropped a
coin into the hat. He then passed on.
leaving the doctor thus mistaken for
a beggar, speechless with astonish-
ment.
Clergymen are often absent-minded.
The Rev. Mr. c., who during his
vacation was in the habit of writing a
number of sermons or the winters use,
came down from the chancel one sun
day after service to speak to one of lis
vestrymen about some parochial mat
ter, after which he said. just before
separating: Il had an idea while
preaching my sermon just now that ii
sounded very familiar, and l have
been rather worried lest I might have
preached IL before. / trust that you
did not have the same impression. Did
you ever hear 1t before?" "Only last
Sunday" was the laughing answer.
A certain old man suffered much
from absent mindedness and was fire.
quently compelled to seek the assist
ance of his servant.
Thomas" he would say, II have
fx.. ztI to a
now ! can't remember what 1t is
whereupon the obliging Thomas In
variably made suggestions:
WAS it your purse, or spectacles,
or checkbook, sir?" and so on, he would
inquire, till he hit upon the right OBJ
ject.
One night, after the old man had re-
tired, the bell rang for Thomas, and
on reaching the bedroom he found his
master rambling restlessly about the
room.
Thomas, Thomas" he said, 81 came
up here for something, and now I've
forgotten what"
was it to go to bed, sir?" suggest
ed the faithful retainer.
"Ah, the very thing the very thing!
Thank you. Thomas. Good nightH"
A Cambridge professor, whose fits Of
mental alteration were as frequent as
they were amusing, was one day out
in a heavy rain, with his umbrella held
high over his head, when he met
friend, who stopped him and ex-
claimed:
Dear me. Prof. NJ, why don't
you put up your umbrella? You'll be
drenched."
Put up my umbrella?" said the pro-
Sc
For half an hour. more or less, the
professor had been walking the streets
with closed umbrella held above his
head.
At another time the same scholar was
riding down town in an electric car.
and lost himself in a book he was read
ing. Suddenly he noticed symptoms of
merriment among the other passengers.
What could they be laughing at?
The mystery was explained when he
discovered that. having been annoyed
by something between the plate Of his
artificial teeth and the roof of his
mouth he had removed the teeth and
was holding them up to view between
the thumb and finger OF his hand!
Still more embarrassing was the case
of lady who hurried into church one
Sunday morning without her bonnet.
and when reminded OF the omission by
her husband. who had preceded her by
several minutes. rose hastily and hur-
ried up the broad aisle with a large red
parasol raised and held close to her
head.
Mrs. L., a Boston lady of dignified |
and even naughty manner. was trying |
on some very expensive wraps in a |
suit and cloak store when che said 10 |
the clerk;
II do not think / viii decide on one |
to-day"
q nOor-waiker detained her. and said: I
II beg your pardon, madam, but / /
shall have 70 ask you to remove that '