West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1902-03-06
.BOWSER'S screen DOORS.
Having Little Spare Time on Hand
Tie Prepares for the Flies Next
Summer.

ne replied
1T occurred to me TO day that as have
plenty of time ON my hands these long
evenings wonld make aud ht some screen
doors Tor next summer The lumber is for
the framework
"bu, YOU are not going to Try to make
them Yourself" protested Mrs. Bowscr.
There won't be any trying about H. /
shall proceed to make and hang them.
m afraid YOU can't do H. It's a nice
piece OF joiner word TO make a screen door
especially one tor the from, of the house "
Il am we'll aware OF that, D." he said as he
strokcd his chin in complacent way.
Haven't got about $50 worth OF tools
Don't know how TO handle thcmf"
IL wish you had given your order at
the shop, as other folks do
"lll bc hanged IL pay any ~ for a pair
OF doors when can make 'cm for 81 You
are always dead set against anything /
undertake"
air Bowscr, YOU can't mako a screen
door You can't hang one. Don't blame
mc when the failure comes
Blame you are you getting crany7 II
those doors are not success. YOU won't
hear word Of fault from me. not a peep
was thinking OF ordering en- but being
you have stuck your nose up SO high Ill
make em new just to show YOU that I can
do it,
Ihree.quarters OF an hour later. having
hurried through dinner and got into an old
suit of clothes ho carried the lumber down
cellar and then spent 40 minutes measur.
ing Tor the front doors Mrs. Bowscr kent
out Of 1t Tor an hour. but finally went down
and found the stuff nll cut to lengths and
Mr Bowscr making half mortises az thc
ends.
Aren't our front doors higher than
th'st' She asked as she picked up one OF
che side pieces
Haven't YOU any houscwork to sec to-"
hc brusqucly replied.
You've got EN- foot too shor,
oh. have. ch2 Some folks eyes are
better than cUpenters rulcl"
Shewcnt back upstairs. but it WASN'T
long before she saw him sneakng around
TO the front with one OF the pieces. She
watched him as he tried .t. and ID was an
OF twelve inches short. Mr. Bowscr scra-
tched his ear. growlcd like bear and
looked as foolish as boy caught in
harvest apple tree. Ten minutes later he
was saving out other strips
We're they too SHORTY, She asked as he
worked away
"N.no, bur ! thought I'd get heavier
stuff he mumblcd in reply.
Mrs. Bowscr consldorntely withdrew.
and Ia the course Of half an hour hc had
one OF the frames nailed together and was
trying it ia the space for which il was
designed She appeared in the hall.
followed by the cat and after glance
she said
MIR Bowser. that door is squeegawed.
"Squeegawed Squeegawcd What
does that stand for in the back couutrles5"
Your door is wider a the bottom, than
at the top
'Bntyour own eyes will convince you.
There's an inch difference
'Ncycrl I'l bet you million dollars
there isn't hairs breadth"
She ran for the tapclino ard soon proved
that the difference was over an inch
"Oh we'll can 6x that in minute.
hc said as he lugged the frame OF but il
was bedtime before he called to her that
the wire was tackled on and the door fin.
ished She went down TO look IL over and
presently asked
Which do you call the outside Of your
door,"
why The sid, this way Of course"
Then you've tackled the wire on The in.
side"
~ hats where d, belongs"
"Fou never saw it there. Mr. Bowser-
never. and look at the way you have
tackled thc stuff onl us bumped mp in
dozen di6ercut places because ou pulled
it askcw
There isn't one hump not the sign Of q
hump. % give any man q billion dollars
TO make q better job Of fiu An tbat door
needs is painting"
'But don they paint the frames before
they tack the wire on How are you going
10 paint the inside Of the framc2
do" worry Yourself about this job
Mrs Bower. wasn't born alongside Of
hucklcbefry marsh.
But after She bad gone upstairs Dee tore
oh thc wire. painted the frame and then
lacked thc wire on the other side The
hour was late and hc concluded to do no
more until morning That night he kicked
around .n IBIS sleep In the moseawfuI man.
ner and dt about o'clock iu the morning
he suddenly sat up in bed and exclaimed
"Squccgawcd. 300 bet you four hum.
drcd thousand billion dollars against
cent that they arc AS plumb as a ruler
Tic started in again as soon as it was
Daylight and notwithstanding thc cold be-
bad both doors 90 thc front when Mrs
Bowsor went out
You see what you SCI done don't Won,
She asked after % survey Of Che scene
don believe Im either ncarsightcd
OF color blind ho replied.
We'll fou'vc got one door wrong side
up fo begin with
H how5
Look at Che panels aud sce Then YOU
have been trying TO hang one 90 swing in
and thc other to swing out
90 have eh That .hows 400 you know
about it im simply Citing the screens so
thcy VIII shut tight Iu have breakfast
and tben finish up in about fs minutes.
When ho bad got 90 work again Mrs.
Bowscr noticed that tbo doors dIdn'i meet
Dob thc center by an inch and each was haif
an IncH short att thc bottom. He bad aso
hung them wilh thc wire on Coo outside
jest then aue.ghbor came along and ura
cd 'n to i1e steps After looking at fbe
doors tor h1lt "a minute BOZ great astonish
mont ho quoncd
Somc'htog iast from Paris Bowscr
What do you mc4ntr
Why you've got new idea sin screen
doors suppose uc space at ODE bottom
is ior bugs that a' thcIop for mosquitoes
and thc center Tor 0.cs Q see you have
lcit ihe frames exposed. They viii make