West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1902-12-18

replied Mr.. Bowser, "and it is need
less TO add that painful death a
waits that cat tomorrow morning.
She shall die by inches. Ipresume
| shall have to walk mile or so to
find another hopper but at the same
time | may solve the question of
whether he sleeps or not. There
should be plenty of them in the
suburbs"
"But you won't be so foolish as
to 60 hunting grasshoppers at night
she protested.
Certainly will. | have prom
ised to observe the insect and re-
port and | propose to do it. II I'm
not back by 10 o'clock you can go
to bed. l may have opportunity to
study the hopper on his native
heath and if so it would be much
better"
Mrs. Bowser argued and protest
ed bat without avail. Mr.. Bowser
felt the scientific world awaited his
decision and he clapped on his hat
and started off. The cat saw him
depart and meowed mournfully but
conscience had been aroused too
late. Mr.. Bowser had walked fully
mile before he reached an expanse
of vacant real estate on which he
might hope to find grasshoppers
resting after their hopful toll of the
day. He turned aside and got down
on his hands and knees to search
about and he had been at work for
10 minutes without making dis
covery when man came across the
unfenced field with a club in his
hand and called out:
"Now then what in blazes are
you doing here1"
'I'm looking for grasshoppers"
replied Mr.. Bowser as he rose up.
"What1 What's thatp Say you
old bloke don't try to guy mel I'm
on to you bigger'n house. You
have buried stolen property here
and are trying to find it."
"My dear sir L."
"Get out"
III want to say"
But the man rushed at him with
uplifted club and Mr.. Bowser had
to put his best foot foremost to get
away. He covered half mile OF
highway before he stopped and he
had sat down to get his breath
when two men and dog came "a
long. The men might have passed
him but the dog spotted him at
once and rushed upon him with
such violence that he was knocked
over. His yel!s brought the men to
him and one of them piled on to
him at once and shouted TO his
companion:
''Grab hold of his foot Jiml We
have got the thief who has been
stealing our chickensl Lie still you
old skulk or I'll knock the ton of
your head off,
Mr.. Bowser. started in to explain
but he had got only as far as to give
his nam e and address when the man
gave him wallop and cried out:
"You old liar but don't think to
deceive usl Where are your part
ners in this chicken business?"
A second explanation was at
tempted. This one included Prof.
Girdlestone and grasshoppers but
the assailants shouted their disbe-
lief and rage and thumped Mr..
Bowser on ~ different portions of
his anatomy. How he got TO his
feet, how he fought for his life, how
ne fed and fell over obstruc tions
but finally left even the dog behind,
are matters that must be suppressed
until Mr.. Bowser is at rest and
some other brain has solved the
grasshopper question. He reached
home at midnight. He wss a hum
an wreck. Mrs. Bowser and the
cat were waiting his arrival and
they stood before him as he opened
the door.
"About grasshoppers2" queried
Mrs. Bowser after long look at
him.
he uttered no word in reply.
'Do they sleep at night or do
they remain awake to run folks all
over the country and tear the clothes
off their back1"
Mr.. Bowser looked from her to
the cat and back, scratched his head
in a dazed way and then slowly
climbed the stairs and disappeared.
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q A A ~ 1870