Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1902-07-16


Soliloquy.-"This is hard world"
said Deacon Flapp, ms he stepped on
the car backward. - Chicago Daily
News. N
SO closely?" Small Boy-"Mamma q ID
that your hat was enough to make
dog laugh. and wanted to see him do
tilt Bits.
Old Mr.. Riche-"What proof have
that you will make my daughter a good
hnsband?" Suitor-"Look at your own
bank account. STRIP
In the Way.-"What's the matter
with Walker?'' run down." over.
workY' "No. under automobile
Philadelphia Press.
81 had proposal last night and re-
fused It," you are always thinking
of the welfare Of others. aren't you.
dear?"-Ohio State Journal.
At meeting of engine drivers the
following toast was offered: ITO our
mothers-the only faithful tenders. who
never misplaced switch" -Nt-Blts.
SO He Waited.-styllsh Lady Visitor
Ito small boy, while waiting for hostess
to come down)--"What is the matter
with Fido that you are watching him
A Jewell Betzer--"Why do you have
iron bars In front of your kitchen win
dows and door?" Shemster-"To pre-
vent the escape of the cook. "-Brook-
Ign Life.
Miss Eastside-"'rhat is lovely
gown, but haven't I seen y beforef'
Miss Westside-"No, l think mot; have
only worn 1t at very few,smart affairs
this season."
Her System. -He-"Airs. Wise seems
to understand how to manage her hus-
band pretty we'll Shelves. She
lets him have her own way in every
thing.'--Life.
Her Charity.-Iack-" the church
garden party n successf" Julin-"Well.
l worked hard enough. ! ate ice cream
with every young man ON the grounds"
Detroit Free Press.
"The Joneses. hear. have left town
suddenly. Have you heard anything
to explain their disappearance? Yes;
believe 1t was due to their trying to
| keep up appearances"
Alas.-Willy (over his natural history
Papa, what species Of animals In
this country are becoming rapidly ex-
tlnct" REPRESENTATIVES and naval
heroes, my son."-Puck.
suhrrhan-.sThis ia shameful! I'll
net stand that cooks insolence mo-
ment longer. AS soon as get to New
York I'll ring her up on the telephone
and discharge her.n,-=Judge--
.Who is the hero OF this piece2 L, avzed
tho man who was coming out OF The the
alter. And the manager tlioughtfully
replied: The man who is putting up
the money! Washington Star.
Minnie-"AIyrtylla is really and truly
orr champion golfer" Mabel-.Non-
scnser, Minnie-.ob. YES. she Is. She
has never yet made a round OF the links
without getting proposal."-Ex.
There are always two political par
ties: not so much because there are two
sides to every public question, las be-
cause there are two sides to every Of
| fee, viz. the Inside and the outside
Life.
Her First Thought.-Mr. Reeder-"I
see by the newspapers the Adyentists
predict that the. world will come to an
end next Friday" Mrs. Reeder-"Oh
dear, and have nothing fit to wear!''-
Ohio State Journal.
investigation of volcanic phenomenon
lead ia any practical conclusion?" SIT
| did, answered the popular scientist.
"What is itY, "a check from maya.
| zine. washington Star.
.Ara ca you have !, ,,tt,a hohv NJ
,our house IL 4. bov or a c,r,3. ast Cd
ncirhbor "AIamma thinks IT'S boy.
hnt I he,ieve it,ll turn out n girl It.s
ALWAYS CRYING about nothing" an
s,,ored tho little bov nit. RIts
hAei.s',e' ,, ~ ~ -, a-
rug arg Nt.s, ~, ' e'e a,,a =,
mems Wy
,,,aot,on 20 ho IN tho .on versat,on ~ be,
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NV w ~ 10 - NJ =. 49,, ~ - o.
.n'o soe'e's "Au t'Ne :. " :.
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