The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-09-19
rAILoRs, EPITAPHs.
Humor and Business Are Deity
Combined in Some Of Them

Humor and Business Are Deity
Combined in Some Of Them
TAILOR and cutter.)
Among the various places Of interest
to be found Ia different parts OF the
country the old churchyard is certainly
not the least interesting, as the tomb
stones occasionally contain records OF
those who are buried below IN quaint,
II not humorous, language, the reading
OF which affords pleasure, as we'll as
food for thought. Some Of those re-
ferring 10 tailors show an acquaintance
with the trade which would serve 10
suggest that they have been written
By some of the dead mans comrades.
One epitaph 10 be seen in Lincoln
shire graveyard was composed Dy the
man prior 10 his decease. After CIV
ing the name and date OF his death' u
says:
1T takes nine tailors to make man;
The fool goes shouting as loud as he
can;
And yet in a sense he hath not blum
dered;
To make a man Of such stun as he
A miracle of clothes would be.
Needing of tailors' brains an hundred.
In the same churchyard there Is
moss covered slab of crumbling slate
which has the following inscription,
now almost unreliable. II says;
Read, mortal, the lot Of tailor, John
Roe
He outlived all his wives. which were
seven;
The worn clothes of his soul lie crum-
bling below.
His soul VIII be mended In heaven"
In a Derbyshire churchyard the fol-
lowing is carved on the tombstone OF
James Green, who was evidently a
tailor by trade. and man OF broad and
generous spirit. The epitaph runs as
follows:
while he lived he all carefully COW
cred our skins.
And left but the right parts to be
seen;
So tell of his virtues and hide all his
sins;
AS he did. do you TO James Green"
A few yards from the grave Of James
Green two tailors are buried, the date
on the stones being 1712. One of them
reads:
"He made others ever new,
Yet for himself could not it do:
Threadbare at last. he's laid away
Against the resurrection day"
The second tombstone is hard 10
read, and requires very close inspec-
ton TO be able 10 decipher the follow
ing lines;
your tears for a tailor who died IN a
fit.
And stiH, If the truth must be known,
He never succeeded with all OF his wit
In other than this fit alone"
surely have had a grudge against this
poor fellow, and though he may not
have been a very successful cutter, yet
doubtless he succeeded occasionally.
Another epitaph on tailor reads as
follows:
Low lies the man who. faithful, up
ward rose.
BY making for our noble king his
His work gave his great patron such
delight.
The king was moved to make of him a
knight"
In a graveyard at Nottingham there
are three tailors buried. and, accord
ing TO a local tradition, We read their
epitaphs were written by a famous
English wit who occasionally visited
the town and employed these tailors to
make his clothes. and, at the time of
their deaths, owed them a consider
able sum, and this was his method OF
paying of the amount:
These bones are a tailor's who never
did fail
In making good garments or in drink
ing good ale.
So well he did both that till now none
hath guessed
In which OF two callings he shone at
his best"
The second stone has as follows:
A man of stitches was Ross Hyde,
In his work lay all his pride
And even when this tailor died
Twas with a stitch in his right side"
The third one is worthy OF the TWO
preceding, and is plainly the work of
the same mind:
Here lies a tailor so careful and proud
That in his last Illness he sewed his
own shroUd.
I shall soon lie in it, were the last
words he said;
Death came as he finished and cut OF
his thread"
An interesting epitaph on a tailor is
to be found in Malham parish church,
and refers 10 the difficulty tailors have
in getting their bills paid. 1t runs as
follows:
All We who pay not what We owe
To her, his wife, who lies below,
How can you ask for sins forgiven,
And when We die and wish for
heaven"
Like most other trades, tailors have
their black sheep. and the following
epitaph must have been written of the
OF the worst specimens. II is 10 be
found In a Yorkshire churchyard:
Here lies. a tailor who loved not his
God.
In all OF his sins he did revei,
But whom he denied struck him with
his rod.
Then babe him go sew for the devil !"