Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1902-07-30
The Squire's
Fish Story ~

nj wv, Sdlu the man from the
" Knob country, IF there was one
thing the squire Dragged on more than
another, it was that he dealt out justice
right from the shoulder, and jest made
percedents as he wanted 'em. So
thought maybe the squire had been
dealin' out little jestice to Ellis Sam,
and as like as not maxim a new per-
cedent, and that Ellis Sam had thunk
up a yarn about the squire, and was
peddlin' it for spite. When he come
in and sort O begun to interdoce it to
me, was all took back, and says:
"'Sam,' l says, you don't mean to
say SOL
II had pitcher O. cider on the table,
pretty nigh the last O the bar'l, but It
nice and snappy, and Ellis Sam had
come in and looked so pleadin' to'rd
the pitcher that told him to soothe
himself with little of what was in
it, and he did.
Then he says to me that he s'posed
I'D heerd about the squire.
"'The squirrel l says.
ellis Sam says to me: Yes, the
squire
II says to him hadn't heerd nothin'
about the squire. What was there about
him. says. and Ellis Sam says:
lilies been afshin!'
"'Not the squirrel l says.
"'Yes, the SQUIRE says Ellis Sam.
And a-huntin', tool he says.
had most emptied the pitcher O cider
fore come to.
Ives, I do mean to say sou says
Ellis Sam, and he went on and told
me some O the most amazin' doin's
that ever was done in the Knob coun-
try, and the squire the doer of 'em,
at that.
"'Cordin' to the way it come to me
from Ellis Sam, the squire got up from
breakfast and says to his wife:
Prudence he says, I'm goin'
a-fshin'.'
prudence was jest turnin' pan
cake on the griddle, balin' it for the
hired man, and she stood there, holdin
it in the air on the turner, she was so
surprised, and she says:
"'A-fshin'? Why, what fer? she
says.
Fer fish, says the squire. That's
what folks goes a-ishin' fer, so I've
heerd,' says he.
"There warn't no more said. The
squire's wife went on with her pan
cake bakin'. The squire went over to
the river a-fishin'..
HE fshed and he fished, but nothin'
came along that way to bite at his
bait. The squire began to git consd-
cradle worked up, and he was on the
pint O. takin' himself into custody.
goin' back and openin' court, and
tinin' himself mebbe ten shillin', when
he got bite and hooked fish. 1t
was big club.
1.-THE club got loose as the squire
was raisin' it from the water, and it
dropped back in.
1.-THE squire spit on his hook and
throwed in ag'in, because, from what
he had heerd about them durn fool
clubs, so Ellis Sam was tellin' me.
that I'm would more than likely grab
right holt of the hoog ag'in, and the
squire would yank him out sure next
time. The bait hadn't hardly sunk
down when the squire got another
slammin' good bite. He yanked and
socked the hook way into the bitter.
"'Any inconsider't' club that fools
with my hook twice. says he, is lest
as good as sizzlin' in my fryin' PAM
says he.
And then he yanked the fish out O.
the water.
"'He yanked it out Danl,' saws
Ellis Sam, tellin' me about it, and
he seen to wunst that it want the
club. The squire had ketched a two
pound eel
'Then, 'cordin' to Ellis Sam, the
squire sot his heart ag'in clubs, and
he says:
That's the way to fish, he saws.
You don't ketch me- he says, 'foo]in'
my time away on no leather-snooted
clubs when I kin set and haul out
eels' he says.
'Then the squire pulled in the
wrigglin' and squirmin' eel, and lift
in it out O. the water, made a grab
fer its neck. He ketched it Jest be-
hind the ears, but before he could
exac'ly figger out how it was done,
the eel had clum up his arm and
made twist or two around his neck,
and then went slidin' down his leg.
round and round it. =
1T only stopped long enough to
sock couple o. teeth into the
squire's thumb as he made another
grab fer it, and then wiggled back
into the river, takin' half o. the
squire's line along with : him, the
half that had the hook onto it. s.
'The squire sot and pondered
spell, and wrapped his han'kercher
round his thumb, which was hurtin'
like Sam Hill. He was het up consid-
er'ble, and after ponderin' awhile he
got up and started home, dead sot
on openin' court and comm to iedg-
ment on himself and establishin'
percedent that'd be a percedent and
no mistake. when what should he see
but big, long-legged crane standin'
in the water on one leg, watchin' fer
fish to come along and be took.
The squire stopped and looked at the
crane spell, and then he says to
himself:
"'That crane is a-fishin', and fish
in is delusion and snare he says.
That crane is bound to suffer weary
in Disappointment if lit has; sot out
to fish, he says, .andsI guess I'll go
and git gun and come back and put
the crane ont O. the way the mis-
cry that's sure to be LAWN in wait