Evening star., 1902-03-08

that he was reading from one Of the latest
ana most sensational novels. Finally an
elder arose in righteous Indignation and
called the much mortified minister to ac-
count.
A gentleman who had a most important
journey ahead of him had the alarm set
for an early hour His family breakfasted
with him, and he bade them goodbye at
the table, but he wished to allow plenty of
time in which to catch the train. The
other members of the household went
about their usual occupat ton. AT o'clock
his wife. happening to pass through the
lower end of the hall, noticed a man on
the settee by the front door. She ques-
toned the servants, but they said no one
had been admitted during the morning
She took the butler with her to make an
investigation. Upon approaching the sup
posed stranger she was shocked to find
her husband whose appearance was con-
strained and unnatural.
He glanced at her, but took no further
notice of her presence. His hat was on
the rack. and his valise neatly tucked
away under the seat, while he sat placidly
and with folded hands looking through
the VeStbule door, In a bored and weary
manner. When his wife touched him on
the shoulder he stared at her in utter as
tonishment for a moment, then springing
to his feet in alarm, cried:
What's the matter, Fanny; why are you
here?"
why, William. what are you doing
here?" replied the wife.
I'm on the road to Boston. You know
that as well as | do
He was much mortified when he found
he had been sitting all those hours in his
own hall. having mistaken it for a vesti-
bule train.
When Danger Threatens.
Presence of mind and absence Of mind
are usually brought to the surface in the
face of some calamity or great danger.
gentleman, while dining with his host saw
the fimsy lace curtains blow against the
gas and catch fire. He responded to the
cry of help from his friend by deliberately
filling his after-dnner coffee cup from the
carafe and throwing the contents on the
flaming drapery. With great pains and
trouble another man insisted on saving
the copy of that mornings paper, while
all of the valuables in his house were de-
Stroyed.
\ gentleman, whose hobby was studying
the mental eQuipose Of the brain, always
maintained that one need never get fluster-
ed in the presence of danger, provided he
Will be deliberate and do things in the or
dnary manner. BY this means both life
and property could be saved.
One night he and his wife were awaken
ed in their hotel by the alarm gong and
the cry of Fire He arose and besought
his wife to be calm and considerate, and
TO dress as usual, neglecting no part Of
her everyday habit of procedure. Silently
the poor. frightened woman hurried on
her clothes and gathered the loose articles
of their wardrobe into a valise, while her
husband carefully adjusted his cravat and
brushed his coat. Then he scolded his wife
for not noticing the tooth brushes. These,
together with his shaving pad, he packed
away in the bag and, taking 1t in one hand,
with the other he led his wife down the
staircase into the street. where they were
greeted by the cheers of the crowd.
Now, Mary he remarked, "you see
owing to my theory and presence Of mind,
here we are safe and sound and you have
not forgotten a single thing"
That's true. William she replied, "but
since the fire is out I would suggest that
you go back and put on your trousers"