The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1902-03-08
geleet gtorp.
POLLY DoDD.
From London Truth.


remain single for various causes. Item,
because they cannot afford to marry. Item,
because they never happen to have met
with girl who suits their fancy Item,
because saey are constitutionally averse
from the tender passion. Item, because
they have no cause in particular, but have
simply drifted into bachelorhood by acci
dent or the force of their surroundings
Men who remain single from any of the
above causes do not, to my mind, repre-
sent the genuine form of bachelor. They
are simply what they are from circum-
stance. But the true bachelor is a bache-
lor from reason. / am bachelor from
reason.
Yes. It is not because I cannot afford
to marry, for | have "a, 900 year. 1t
is not because have never met girl who
suits my fancy / have met scores. 1t
is not because,I am constitutionally averse
from the tender passion, for l am rather
amorous than otherwise. 1t is not because
I have no cause in particular, for have
the most definite and intelligent causes
1t is simply this, that have carefully con-
sidered the question of marriage in the light
of what philosophers call ''pure reason =
that faculty which bears the same relation
to common intuitive perception as X-rays
bear to the common light of day.
And by turning these cold, calm, search
ing rays upon matrimony, as it obtains in
Christian countries, what do | see? [ see
an institution which, under the guise of
being for the mutual society, help, and
comfort of the man and the woman, really
has nothing mutual about it. For what
does the term mutual imply, except
system of reciprocity-of give and take ?
But in matrimony the ''give'' is all on
one side, the mans; and the "take'' is
all on the other side, the womans. For
instance, the man gives name; the wo
man takes it, The man gives home, the
woman takes it. The man gives an in
come, the woman takes it. The man gives
independence; the woman takes it. Yes,
that is true and undeniable The restricted
girl blossoms into the free and Independent
wife, The free and independent bache-
| lor fades into the restricted husband. Tis
hopelessly one sided affair, in which vir
has everything to lose and femina every
thing to gain. And yet the girls are as
tonished that men grow every day more
shy of coming up to the scratch Shy,
forsooth Rather the wonder is that they
can ever bring themselves to toe the line
at ALL
But in spite of all this, the truth of
which no impartial person can dispute
women are constantly writing novels in
which, by distorting facts and misrepre-
senting experience, they make desperate
effort to maintain exactly the opposite po-
sition In these novels not the husband,
but the wife, plays the role of victim. Not
he, but she, is the real loser by matrimo-
ny. But-leaving their other misrepre
sentations out of the case-these unfair
champions of the fair all make the ridicu
lously false assumption that woman and
man start, SO to speak, equal when they
marry. No more absurdly untrue premise
ever paved the way to fallacious conclu
sion. Woman, when she marries, is as &
tame canary let loose from tiny cage into
the comparative freedom of spacious
aviary. Man, on the contrary, is as wilt
songster made captive, to whom the sale
aviary is not place Of liberty, but pris
on. Yet, instead of being pleased with the
increased freedom thus brought to them
instead Of feeling grateful to him who hai
sacrificed himself on purpose to bring it Il
them, these thankless canaries must need
scold and chatter because the aviary is no
larger, and hold themselves cruelty ag
grieved if those wild songsten, their mates
fly off now and then by themselves t.
: stretch their wings awhile in their nativ
and congenial blue.
For myself, will never sacrifice m,
right to soar unfettered through the bound
less sky, in order to bring comparative
freedom to any Gagged canary. No aviar.
and no scolding mate for me. No, thanl
you. A wild songster | am, and will
songster I will remain. Yes; the canarie
-artful dickies-shall preen and plum
themselves, and set their little yellow cap
at me in vain. To be sure, will bill an
Airt with them, and make playful love t
the pretties through the bars; but ente
the cage? Not |.
At this minute, there are, to be precise
no less than five canaries bent upon en-
caeing me. There is Ethel Phipson
! There is Lily Cartwright. There is Jane
Fairbains. There is Nellie Dampler
There is Jessie Raymond All are prett
and charming. IF L lived in the domin
ions of the Grand Turk, I might possibl
wed the lot, for there the Gagged canarie
continue to be Gagged, and the wild song
ster, though mated 10 times over, contin
, ues to enjoy unfettered freedom. Blu
|, since live in England, this land of mono
! gamic fetterdom, wholesale matrimony
l impossible, and retail union is not goo
|, enough. They are dear girls, as girls
+ As such, l like to love them all little
, But to devote myself entirely to one G
, them as wife is hardly my ticket. "On
; man, one vote, is a preposterous theor
! enough, in all conscience, but some mar
one love-. is altogether too ridiculous. |
, the investment of fellow affections, a
of his money, this maxim holds good
onever put all your eggs in one basket.
t | wrote the above in my commonplac
book one day last year. 1t contained tn
ideas for novel which | meant to write
when had time-a masculine matrlmon
ial novel. which should counteract the falls
impressions created by those feminin
matrimonial novels to which have alluded
It was to be a scorcher, too-a regula
ssSixth Satire of JuvenaP novel
Uxorem Postume. dncs?
Dis qua Tisiphone quibus exagitare colubris?
| Ferre potes dominam salvs tot restibus ullam !?
and all that sort of thing. But | haven
! written it. The fact is, it seemed, on ma
ture reflection, rather absurd to crush but
5 teriies with sledgehammer-to bowl owe
,, canaries with 47-inch gun. Let ell
be-poor little chattering, scolding dickies
Let EN- peck at us as they please, in tn
pages of their ''Yellow Asters'' and thei
"Beth Booksr' The digs and stabs G
their little bills, after all, hurt us not
They only tickle.
7 met Ethel Phipson today in the trai