The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1902-08-30
BOWSER'S BLOOD CURE
It Removed q Pimple and Made the
Evening HILARIOUS.

L.
his cigar the other evening when the
doorbel rang and the girl said that
man wanted to see him at the door, he
stepped outside and held what seemed
to be private conference for about
ten minutes, and when he returned he
had two quart jug in his hand.
1T was our butcher he explained
as Mrs. Bowss- looked at him IN q
questioning way.
And he brought you that jug?"
yes / was telling him a few days
ago that needed an old fashioned blood
cure, ard re volunteered to make up
one He knew just where 20 get the
roots md h-.r rs. you see. He saalzes up
some FOR hirrsc'- cry summer
And so you've finally got around to
a blood cure.' sighed Mrs. Bowser
.sWiH this be the end of it for a month
or two, or will you try a dandruh Grad
icator, liver invigora tor. Or a hay fever
douche before you Quit?'
Are you finding fault because my
blood is out of order and want to cure
it 2" demanded Mr.. Bowser. THAT would
be just like you"
Il hadn't seen any signs of your blood
being out of ORDER
..Oh, you hadn't I've had pimple
as big as a hickory nut on my nose for
the last two weeks and yet you haven't
noticed it! Others have, however I've
been almost ashamed to ride on the
cars, and I've had boys call me Old
Pimple My blood has been off for
weeks and weeks and it's a wonder I
haven't had pimples by the hundred.
It's ito wonder 1 have nightmare and
toss about as I do
And the butcher has kindly fixed
you up a cure?'
He has Have you any objections?'
mot the slightest. Go ahead and
take your dose and get rid of your pim-
pie"
Mr.. Bowser looked at her for min
ute in an undecided way and then set
his jaw and carried the jug down to
the dining room. The main ingredients
of the cure were sassafras and dande-
| lion, and the butcher had told him to
drink half a tumblerful three times a
day. The stuff smelled good and tasted
better, and after one glass Mr.. Bowser
decided to push things. There was no
use foOling around with that plmple Tor
a week or two when it could be cured
in one night. He took a second glass
and put the jug away, but almost i'm
mediately brought it out again to i'm
bibe third. He had a good thing, ana
he meant to push it The third glass
settled the fate of that pin1ple for all
| time to come. He went upstairs and
| sat down to his neWSpape and Mrs.
Bowser had no remarks to make. Ten
| or twelve minutes had passed when the
| family cat came out from under the
piano and strolled about the room, and
after looking at her and rubbing his
| eyes Mr.. Bowser said:
Mrs BOwSer, have you turned this
house into cat hospital "
What do you mean?" she queried.
why, there are three old cats walk
| ing about the room as if they wer-
| very much at home"
You don't mean to say you see three
cats?''
Three cats. Mrs. Bowser, three
| blamed old tomcats. and I won't have
| IT. III knock every one of 'em in the
There is only one cat here. Has that
| pimple worked off your nose into your
| eves?"
Mr.. Bowser rubbed his eyes and
winked and blinked, and, 10, two of the
| cats vanished
Il was just joking he said in a silly
way-'just having a little fun you
know. OF course there's only one cat,
and she's the dearest old thing in the
world. Mrs. .Bowser. next to you I love
that cat more'n anything else on earth.
| If she should die, I'd want to die too!''
How much of that blood cure did
| you take?" asked Mrs. Bowser as she
looked hard at him.
Just a sip, my dear. But it's doing
| me lots of good already. I think it's
| time to take another sip. You and the
dose. Funny about those three old
cats-ha, ha. ha! Thought it was the
| cat hospital, you know"
Mrs. Bowser did not seek to restrain
| him, but when he had gone downstairs
| she went up to her room. He didn't
! intend to take but one dose of that
| blood cure, and that small one but
the liquid tickled his palate and had
| that the small dose became two large
4 nd liberal ones.
Nothing like it Tor the blo.c-noth-
ing like il" he unused as he snacked
his lips and reluctantly set the jug
away. Butchers know what IS good
| for pimples on the nose. If hadn't
! happened to speak to our butcher, I
might Eave had forty pinlples by Sat-
urdey. Funny about those Old cats
Can't tool me again, though
AS he went upstairs he looked for
Mrs Bowser, and, not seeing her, he
sat down heavily in a chair and glanced
over on the lounge and was purring
away with eyes half closed.
"Yesh, er beS cat in er world" said
Mr.; MI Bowser after gazing at her for
with a bottle, you come to me about
it. Anybody who hits my cat hits me.
shay, now. what's your name? I used
h TO ano " !, IT. but IT'S d; gone out of my
The cat opened her eyes and ceased
| to purr, and after some trouble Mr.
Bowser got his eyes on her again and
said:
IF it amt Napoleon, then it's Shake
speare or Cicero or Caesar, but it's all
/ right-all right. Best cat in er world
ana a best name in er world, If want
| don't say Mornings bout it. Shay, Ma
/ poleon, let's be happy while we may
Let's swing our hats and whoop and
ha. ha, ha! You good Teller, I'm good
teller, and Mrs. BOwsher good Teller
| Whoop. Whoopee!"
/ The blood cure was having its due effect
| and as Mrs. Bowser listened over the ban
lister she heard Mr.. Bowser trying to work
| up a jig with his feet. After few shut
hes he suddenly stoppe dto call out:
by er great horn spoon, but them old
cats have come back-six, seven, eight
nine. of 'em Nine cats in a row, and ali
looking at me! Funniest thing / ever
saw-ha, ha. hal If Mrs. Bowser was
down here she'd go into Mysteries I don't
want no cat hospital around here but I
won't be mean about it. Al. er cats NAV
stay all night and I'll give em all er milk
they want to drink Whoopee, I'm feeling
great. 1 am. If 1 had some firecra clzers
I'd nave a regular old Fourth of July
| Now. you cats, strike up tune and shee
me waltz to it,
Mr.. Bowser rose up and wabbled about
and finally staggered over and fell upon
! the lounge. The cat escaped crushing by a