The Savannah morning news. (Savannah, Ga.) 1900-current, 1902-09-11

other Matters of Special interest.
From Harlequin.
The old reporter handed his last
story to a sleepy-looking cub" kick
ed him in the direction of the city edi-
tors chair, and placing his feet on the
desk of the associate editor SO as to
give himself an air of both superiority
and comfort, said:
'I see that energetic New York de-
tectives have succeeded in locating and
raiding a green goods plant. You fell
lows who are just cutting your eye
teeth in the business have no idea of
the difficulties inseparable from the
pursuit of the green goods artist, In
ninety-nine cases out of a hundred the
jay gathered in by the goods
operator is too Verdant to make kind
ling-wood and is entirely unable to
give the police an intelligent story of
his loss. Occasionally the green goods
purveyor strikes man of more than
ordinary intelligence, in which event
he is safe from exposure. The intelli-
gent man does not like to be 'guyed'
and keeps his troubles to himself. So,
all in all, the green goods boy is pretty
secure in his position and the ordinary
detective hates him about as much as
the makeup man hates piece rules, or
the galley boy hates soap.
Il can remember the time when
green goods stories were so rare that
we gave them first page positions I'M
der thirty-six point Roman but they
got to be so common that the boys at
the station q mean the reporters, of
course) regarded them as a standing
joke. On nights when news was so
scarce that DRINKS and disorderlies
looked as big as suicides and wife
slayers, we would saunter into Daddy
Malones Office and say: Dad, trot us
out green goods ghost; items are
scarce as pay days Whereupon Dad
dy would reach into the mysterious re-
cesses of his desk, produce a dozen or
two closely-written typewriter docu-
ments and hand them out among the
boys for all the world as, if he were
distributing prizes at Sunday-school
class. For Daddy had a mighty high
opinion of everything his sacred hand
| touched, an opinion in which his sub
ordlnateS didn't share, mores the pity
The next morning newspaper read
ers would be startled with highly-col-
oreo accounts of the operations of
| green goods artists and some of 'em
would go straight home and lock UP
their valuables, totally unaware of the
| fact that the circulars which appeared
under such glazing headlines had been
| gathering dust and cobwebs in Daddy
Malone's office for year or more
What's that? Didn't the police peach?
OF course, they didn't, you young yap
Their names were in the paper and
what more could the most exacting fly
cop desire? I'll give you kids pointer
IN police work. Lie like thunder if you
like; dress up facts so that their own
mother wouldn't recognize them; if the
story lacks anything, invent it without
| the slightest hesitation. Then put the
policeman's name to it; add a dash or
two of soft sawder about striking abil-
1ty and 'painstaking vigilance and the
body Will swear that every word YOU
/ wrote is gospel The ordinary police
| man could swear hole through an
| iron pot or lie a Turk into a daze
But that is depression. To return to
my mutton, as Mr. Weller says. l was
about to say that now and then you
strike a green goods artist with a
| heart. I knew of such a case-took
part in it, too. But that is neither here
nor there. Want to hear the story?
| Well, here goes.
1T happened of a winter night.
Somehow or other, all these tragic or
dramatic things do happen in winter.
The rain was pouring in torrents and
the wind blowing in fitful gusts along
the dready and deserted streets. Gas
lamps f1ickered in the wind-we had
no electric lights then-and the streets
were covered from curb to curb with
water 1t was a mighty bad night to
be abroad, l tell you, and when the
city editor called me from my seat in
front of the blazing office fire, my
trained nose scented a detail. and I
kicked like government mule. (The
city editor wasn't present when 1 kick
ed, by the by, but never mind that) I
was wanted at the station and as the
city editor had a nasty eye and dys-
pepsia to boot. it didn't take me long
to get on my macintosh