The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1902-03-06

WEEK."
the stairs. When be realized that a
climax was not far away. the major
took the initiative and aggressive.
MADAM" he said to the landlady as
he rose up from the dinner table. III 1t
will not be asking too much. | wish
you would bring up my bill some time
during the evening. I do not like my
board bill to run on in this way"
"%Yon-you mean that you Will settle
up?" she eagerly queried.
Certainly. ma'am. You could have
had q check weeks ago had you spoken
Of II. Do not fail to bring up my bill
within an hour or two"
II will bring II up within FIVE min
ttes."
The major had scarcely got seated in
his room and lighted a cigar and placed
a %checkbook on the table before him
when the landlady tinidly entered and
handed him his bill for II weeks
board. He received 1t with marked In
difference. glanced over 1t with careless
eye and yawned as he said:
"Eleven weeks at So per week is $50.
The bill is perfectly correct. Hold on.
during this timer
Eyes, bur never mild them"
"But we must find them. You are
keeping d Boarding iiouse for the mon
ey there is In it. and when extras are
furnished they must be paid for. Shall
we say 500 altogether? VIII that COW
er your billi"
"Oh, yes. yes! Major. L hope you
won't blame me for wanting my mon
ey, but you know
"Of course | know. No one expects
you are going to run a free boarding
house. Let's see. Your first name Is
Susan. | believe. II is with unalloyed
pleasure that l make you nj a check
FOR an even hundred dollars"
"How can ! thank your" gasped the
pleased landlady.
you needn't try to. It's a mere mat
ter of business between us. II any
thanks are due. they are from me to
you. Mrs. Bates. you have shown your
confidence in me. Some landladies
would have jumped on me two months
ago. but you have LEI this bill run IL
weeks and never said a word. Do you
think | am insensible to such consider
htion? 1t is true that on several ocea-
sions | have found my bed unmade and
my trunk dragged OIL into the hail. but
that was simply an error of Judgment
on your part"
ell homo veu.u for-iro p,ov
"There's nothing to forgive my dear
woman. Yes, you bad confidence in my
financial integrity, and | would be an
trgrate not to wish to reward you.
Thank heaven, 1t is in my power to do
SO. and at once. Mrs. Bates. did you
ever ride out in a carriage of your
ownY"
"Eever. major" she answered.
sand did you eve own $4,000 worth
IT diamondsy
"Heavens. no. I've always been a
poor. Woodworking landlady. you
know"
"Well, prepare to ride out In your
carriage and loaded down with your
own diamonds. You have cast your
bread upon the waters, and II has re-
turned. Mrs. Bates. you know that |
am q promoter. q speculator?"
"Why, I knew that you were always
getting up schemes.
Exactly, and 1t Is those schemes that
have made me a millionaire five times
over. Let NE inform you of my latest.
Yesterday | Incorporated the Great
American Extract company. with d
capital of a million dollars paid In.
There will be a 40 per rent dividend
the first year, and after that 1t will run
to 100"
Eyes. but I don't understand busi-
hess, you know" said Mrs. Bates as she
looked l6ngingly at the clock.
But l cnn make you understand In
about three minutes. This company
proposes to extract the oils and es-
sences from various things by n new
and patented process. In strict con-
hdence let me say that the spirits we
shall extract from horse radish alone
Will warrant a dividend of 10 per cent.
We shall extract brandy from peaches,
burgundy from tomatoes and cham
payne from pineapples and artichokes.
In still s~tricter confidence will tell
you that we shall take the common
burdock and extract from 1t a salad
Pressing equal to the best in market
Mrs. Bates. your hour has come"
GOOD heavens, how you scare me!"