The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1902-07-30
me.Making.

sSooSaouSV 5VUu Oehl OF comment In
Che city newspapers, and many were
the conjectures as to the reasons
which had actuated SO many. couples
to unite their lives and fortunes at
that special time, but without any
very plausible solution Of the problem
being found. The natural sequence |
OF a. happy marriage is the setting up
OF home; and there are few subjects,
more interesting to bride, whether
actual or perspective, than that Of
"home.making." 1t is misfortune
when young couple are 80 circum-
stanced that it becomes necessary for
them to make their first essay of mar
ried life in the parental home Of either
party. # young man ia an indepeu.
dent, manly character he usually de.
termines that he will have house
or at least home-of his own, whore
ais wife will be free from the inter
ference Of either her relatives or his,
for, however kindly and well-meant
such Interference may be, it does not
always conduce to the happiness Of
those concerned. If the young bride
has been helpful and loving daugh-
ter, sharing with her mother the duties
Of the household and the care of the
younger children, it is very natural
that the parents should be reluctant to
have her leave them and they can see no
reason why the husband should not be-
come member Of their household and
everything go on as before. This plan
seldom works well and it is serious
mistake to attempt it; for from hence
forth her first duty is to her husband
and his comfort and special interests
should be her first care. This is gen.
orally impossible while they remain
in the old home.
On the other hand, if young man.
has been q good son and brother, his
family is seldom sincerely willing to
have him marry at all; but il he in
sists upon doing 80 they are apt to
think they are less likely to lose their
former influence over him If his bride
is welcomed into the family, and that
it will be less expensive than to set
mp separate establishment. There
are cases in which suoh an arrange
ment appears to work we'll, but it is
only in very exceptional ones that
those appearances are not deceptive.
A mother must have very large por-
tion Of the provcrbial unselfshness of
e mother if she can see quite unmoved
and without any pang of jealousy the
first place in her sons affections
which has. been hers since his baby
hood-given to another, and to per-
son who was probably a stranger to
him until within short time. And
then, too, the kinder a brother has
been the harder it is for his sisters
when they realize they are no longer
his first consideration. Conceal these
feelings as they may they may even
deny having them at all-they will
crop out at times, and it is usually to
the bride they are shown. making her
position in the family not always an
enviable one.
There is still another consideration
which makes it desirable for young
married people to have a home Of
their own wherever it is at all pos.
sible. The glamour Of courtship is
not conducive to thorough knowledge
Of each other and, without the slight
est intention to deceive, it is but
natural that each should endeavor to
appear in the very best light to the
object of his or her affections. Even
in the very happiest marriages there
must inev;:sbfy be slight surprises
if not disappointments-in store for
both, in findiLg unsuspected traits Of
character, of temper. or habits and
modes of thought in their ideal. In
the very brightest married lives there
are likely to be few clouds, aud
even showers, while the young people
ore learning to know each other to be
ordinary men and women, and not
heroes and angels; and during this
period between the honeymoon and
the settling down into the quiet and
content of those who have been mar
rIed for some years, it is best for the
couple to be alone and without anyone
to observe and comment upon, and
possibly to increase, their little differ
ences. Everything is in favor of
their coming to quicker understands
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