Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1902-10-11

He has a picture Of his sweetheart
inside his watch" Indeed Wen, he
looks SO happy lately. l though there
must toe Il woman in the case"
Church, see the definition of a gen,
deman is one who never gives pain.
Gotham don't suppose my dentist
would like II IL told him that.
Invalid understand ii is quite dry
>ut here. Broncho Wnllam--Dry?
Why. stranger, lis so dry here that
HE rain is wet only ON one side.
so the engagements OFF, yes;
She advised him to practice economy,
and he started in by getting her an imi-
alton diamond. detroit Free Press.
Wifc-Really, she's the worst gossip
the neighborhood. Why. | heard this
morning that She Husband Come,
low, don't try TO beat her at her own
game.
\ Common Variety: Young Doctor
Which kind OF patients do you find it
hardest TO cure; Old DoctoI-Those
who have nothing the matter with
.hem.-ludge.
Were you much embarrassed when
ne kissed your" NO. was frighten-
d. though" How so?" II told him
% stop, and Cor moment thought he
was going to-"
Beetem-Pshaw! l must have $50 by
noon to-day, and left all my money mt
acme in my other clothes. Can't you
lelp me outr Wscman-Sure! III
end you carfare to go home for It.
What care l for gold or silverY said
he proud beauty. Your sentiments are
Aminently practical" answered Miss
Cayenne. Get some steel or copper
stock and the gold and silver viii take
are of themselves"
summer Hotel Proprietor proudly)--
Nearly all my walters are college men
who are working their way through
| 'ollege, Guest-Well, judging by the
way they work your guests, theyn
Ill be graduated with honors.
The Status Marie-"I have an en-
gagement with Cholly, and don't
know how TO get out of It," Helen
Haven't you any reason for breaking
| it," Marie-"Yes, ! have reason
Cholly is the reason--butI want an cx-
cuse. Puck.
rs there any profit in selling postage
stampsP' inquired the man in search OF
information. "Not directly" replied the
druggist; "but 1t gets people into the
habit of going to the drug store, ana
after that II doesn't take long 10 make
chronic invalids OF them. Puck.
Mrs. Goodsole-Why, Johnny, are
you just going home now? Your moth
er's been looking for you all afternoon.
Johnny-Yes'm, know. Mrs. Goodsoie
Just think how worried she must be.
Johnny-Oh, she's near the end o. her
worryin'. I'm just beginni! mine.
"Gracious!" exclaimed Mrs. Newli-
wed, examining the window-sash,
Something has been gnawlng at this
woodwork" "Yes; | noticed that" re-
piled her husband. "A little dormouse,
perhaps there are lots of them around"
"A dormouse? But this is on the win
dow-sash!'
No so Disinterested. Biggs-I had
no idea old Graspit was a philanthrO-
pist until saw him circulating a petit
tlon yesterday for the purpose of rails
ing money TO enable poor widow 10
pay her rent Diggs-Oh, Graspit's an
right He owns the house the poor
widow lives in.-Chicago News.
A certain Dyersburg woman assured
her husband she never told him a lie
and never would. lie told her he didn't
doubt 1t, but would hereafter cut a
notch IN the piano when he knew she
deceived him. mo, you wont" she
screamed. I'm not going TO have my
piano all ruinedw State Ca
zette.
Examining a class of children, patrl-
archal gentleman asked for the names
Of some of the islands near England.
! There was dead silence, and TO help
| the scholarS-himself thinking of the
Isle of Mamie remarked, encourage
| ingly: Can you think Of any places
where no women are allowed, only
men?' Instantly a girl held up her
hand; please, sir. the Scilly Isles"
The front-door bell rang furiously. A
head adorned with shaggy and unman-
ageable whiskers was thrust out of the
chamber window, and voice that Mt
ted the beard inquired, "Who is it3'
'Oh, is this Mr. Higgins?" came n shrlll
voice from the SHADE of the doorway
below. Yes" please come to No. II
High street just as quick as you can,
and bring your Instruments" Il amt
no doctor; I'm a carpenter. DR.. Hig-
gins lives two doors below" and the
window was coming down with slam,
when Please, SIR said the little
voice, its you we want. Pa and ma
is shut up in the foldin' bed, and we
can't get 'em out."-Chicago Journal.
A Useful Barometer.
According to a French meteoroIogist,
L,