davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Scranton Wochenblatt. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1865-1918, 1902-06-19
9raf Erlftoi ntmmt flo bes Baus
eruflaube6 an.

e~SuFsW@vSO o0s
@raf TplRoi Cat an ben 8assn nnee.
ii&ts Der Sage bee ruifi&sn 8~auernftans
bee eiHen Brief gef@riebeH. bet bur& Elm
MiiteIieb beB rufifGsR 4aiferbaufss sr.
pebirt ipurbs. 1olffoi rebst BARN ben
Barren nit ,,Du'' unb .,1bsuru Bvus
Der" an. Der Snbalt IN in @efentli'
DEN Der, bob Graf 1olRoi ben 8arsn an
bic 8sit Nlsranber II. srinnert. Der cine
10 bobe aufeabe eldnaenb lbIte /: bic aufs
bsbuns Der 2sibeiseni&aft.
,.er CAB ben Gauern bic Greibeit, ~
bsnfeu unb ~ idaifen, ipie iebsr anbere
Nsni4. Die aufsabe If isbo& nit
Aufbsbune Der 2eibeissnf&aft ALIEN nod
ni&t eetbft. Ser Bauer tritt nit bersa.
tieten Bitten unb Anforberunssn be,por,
osnen mon fem DIR ni&t bsriHliebsn
oarf. Die einaise Wbslafeit, ben 8au.
ernftane auf bic 8eine su 5rineen, IN
i&leuniefe Salfe bonn Ttrone bsrab.
Du tannft 60 ALIEN, tbeurer Bruber, ober
ioIte 90 bod cine Wa&t esbsn. bic Did
oaran binbert, bic hdrfer III ais bein
Diaef Dsnn eem 70 III. 70 Iab ben
8%ausrnfano pie aud bic lbrissn Stdnbs
ALIEN ibre Sntersfen pertreten. ibrs an.
iprtl4e unb Soroeruneen borbrineen !
Du pirif Oabur@ bon elmer eroben 2aft
s%ntbunben (TOlfoi ipieIt bier auf cine
tonftltutiOnsas 8erfaRuns am unb man,
hsr Gorge dbertoben."
@raf 3olftoi u~nterbrsitst barauf BEN
Barren bic Sbes, bic 8esieruns mOss 10.
rerfeits 2ano anfaufen unb Go ben Bau.
srn su berbdltnibmdbis seriassn prsiisu
tbsrlaRsn. Gar bat ben Brief r,a.
tie erbaltsn unb unIdnaf BEN @rafsn
psribnIi& bic WitttsiIuns eema&t. nit
BEN 8ermeri, eab bas S&reiben Jpn isbt
intsreifrt babe. ba 60 uiele @ubrbsitsn
enitalts.
Scranton Wochenblatt. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1865-1918, 1902-06-19
ansebIi&er Rseer $ aafftans In
Refine uuterbradt.

Sn Nsribian. MiG., bsibt %, bab bic
Reser in BEN COUNTY. bic siiua tipsi
Driitel Der 8ebblisruns bilben. beabs
i6tisten, ale @eiben su sriaIaesu unb
.bsrsn S~armbduisr nieberjubrsnnsn. Gin
farbiser 1aptihsu.B reoiesr 8amsns
BuHtn uno Wate Noore iolen an Der
Spite Der 8srfAlpSrune esitanbsn 90.
ben. Die Drtfaaft 8io in Qsmpsr
County ionte Der SammeIpIat Der Nsesr
fem. Bon BEN aus fs ibveH Norb. utt
aaub,us in Sesne fssen ipoaisn. Die
@sibsn srfubren bon BEN Blame ber
6arbiesn unb bstpafneten F&. Sic
Iisben bann bic 9essr ipiiisn. bab isiHs
nmadnee nit ibnsn eema4t ipesbsn
iuaresn. faQs fe ss uaaieH. fi@ maufs
~ ma&sn.
Scranton Wochenblatt. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1865-1918, 1902-06-19
Rerbbaufeu's hunbertiabrise Su'
belfeier uatm etseu ~sidu;ens
ben NerIanf.

BEN WeTtaHf.
Das SubsIfsa sur Tsisr Der kunbsyts
idbrisen 8usebbrisisit Rerbbauisus suH
preuBii&en Staats IN in e~I6naeabsr
DeiIe ~perIaufea. Sn allen fbnieIiGsn
unb ftdbtii&eH S&uIen 9prbbauiens
tpurben SeitaIte abasbatieH. Die fdbtis
i&en R6rperf&aften battsn cine Seffs.
une in Der AuIa bes alien 0pmnaiiums,
40 tueI@er ber Dbsrprdibsnt ber 9ros
pina Sa@ien unb bsr Rseisrunesprdfi'
bent aus @rfurt erI&iensn tparsn. SIN
btefsr Sehfkune 9etudbrtsn bic Stabts
b~erorbneten ju BEN bsreits borbanbenen
Rapitalftod bon 10000 Nart (burd,
SGeniune bes berforbensn 9rofeRora
perfHmann) ipeitsre 10000 Warf sum
8au s.nss ftdbtii&sn Wuienmsssbauoss.
I'm l nbr Wittass beeann bas SeftmabI.
bon 81 nbr on betueeie f@ Elm grocer
5ehsue bon her @rimmeIalee bur6 biz
9auptftraBsn Der Stabl mad BEN @ebses
(bem 2uitwalbe Der Rorbbdufer), ipoielbf
Gin Seftait, befebsnb aus SetanIpradeu
unb 8ortrdeen Der @sianebsreine, fats
fanb. abenbs biIosisn bann Slumina.
tiOn unb Ssueitperi i'm Gebeee ben Ab'
fdlub bes benftufrbieen Seftes.
Scranton Wochenblatt. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1865-1918, 1902-06-19
,,Hicrobe Killer

il Elm grdparat. msIdss ale 9ranft titsn BELT,
neil % bic Mifrobsn i'm menlHIideH 6phems
uHo DIui t6otei uno baenr4 ben Neg lur eeii.
une sbHei. Die Ratur tbut baun bel b%srnint.
tiger e%tbtnsueiit has lebriee. RHr ~ bqitbtn
in Oh eada. dpe., Scranton. pa.
Scranton Wochenblatt. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1865-1918, 1902-06-19
guSIa

Sn 2iKa, @rei&sn unb 9rombsre iinb
sabIrsi&s Berbaftunsen bon POlsn tpesen
GsbeimblnbeIei tpreenommen ipprben.
Scranton Wochenblatt. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1865-1918, 1902-06-19
0erlanat sperben:

Die Ramsn unp Abrthsn bon aranfeu. bic
feline eiuoeruuo ibrtr aeiotu our& iutliae
Dehanelnna gefun ben baden. abrefirt: Sill
eadaDanHa aptuue. Scranton. ga.
Scranton Wochenblatt. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1865-1918, 1902-06-19
6leiOermOcbcrim.

Dk tlntfrrihnttt smpfebIt G& adtuuasssu
ale WsbifiH uab 8isibtrma6nin uub 6slsrat
AIbsitsn In ier 8ran@t sur 9ufrisbfnbri uni
ui6btetH prdleH. an@ MbanbsrHnesH unb
RfpaTaiurtn btltHs bfforgt.
0rau u. M. Wprrep,
4f0 eprun Straet, ~obtnauf.
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1902-10-17
MADE A GOOD HAUL.
Nebraska Train Robbers Said to Have
Secured S33 600.

S~~~sSN V>'~9SVSs
Lincoln, Neb., Oct. 10. - The man
hunt in Southeastern Nebraska con-
tlnued during the day and the four
highwaymen who held up the Bur
lington train near Lincoln seemingly
have iistanced their pursuers. A heavy
rain has made the following OF the
trail even with bloodhounds out OF
the question. The Burlington detec-
tives and Lincoln police, who we're
beating about in Cass county, abandon
ed the search and returned here. Of
tlcers in every town that the robbers
might have visited are on the look
out Some of the Lincoln police are
OF the opinion that the robbers are in
hiding in this city or not far from
here. What strengthens this belief
is the fact that three horses were sto-
len at the town of Raymond, not far
from the scene of the holdup, ridden
hard in a roundabout way to this
place and then abandoned.
A police officer working on the case
said that according to figures given
him by an official of the express com.
pany there was close to $4,000 be-
longing to the express company in the
booty secured by the robbers. The
figures were given in the shape OF a
detailed statement of the denomina.
denomination.
A dispatch from the town of Hubbel]
says that two men are being detained
there on suspicion. They answer the
description of two of the highwaymen
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1902-10-17
BoER GENERALS IN PARIS.
Botha, 0ewet and Delarey Hearth,
Welcomed,

Botha, 0ewet and De'arey Heartily
Welcomed.
Paris. Oct. 1.-THE Boer generals.
Botha, Dewet and Delarey, arrived in
Paris during the day. Senator Paul
lat and the pro-Boar committee met
them at the railroad station. After
speeches of welcome had been deliv-
cred the party drove to a hotel. The
vicinity of the station and the route
to the hotel were thronged with spec
tators who heartily cheered the gener-
ais, although the crowds present and
the enthusiasm manifested were moth
ing like the assemh!ages and demon
stTation witnessed On the occasion of
MI. Kruger's arrival two years ago.
General Bclha, replying to Senator
Pauliat, said:
we have suffe: &c s1eatly ana had
to sign peace which was a great
shock to you and us. l hope self-goy-
eminent will soon be given to the Boer
people. for they Loyalty laid down their
arms and took the oath OF allegiance.
EHt it must not be inferred from this
allegiance that they will allow them
selves to re dragged in the mud"
: This statement was greeted with
cheers. The society for the aid OF soer
children handed General Dewet SIS.
900. .5s*| II w. s. u.
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1902-10-17
DEED OF A MANIAC.
Kills His Mother, Two Sisters and a
Brother at Homestead, Pa.

Kills His Mother, TWO Sisters and a
Brother at Homestead, Pa.
Pittsburg, Oct. 11.-While laboring
under mental alteration, the result
of the strain of perfecting an appli
ance for an air brake which is pend
ing at the patent Office in Washing
ton, Charlec Cawley. seventeen
year-old boy of Homestead, Pa, killed
his mother and sister and fatally in
jured four other children. He also
tried to kill his two older brothers,
but was detected, overpoWered and
turned over to the police.
The weapon used was an axe, with
which he crushed and hacked his vic,
Tins beyond recognition. The dead
are: Mrs. Hannah Cawley, aged
about forty years, head and upper por'
ton of her body almost pounded to a
jelly; Belle Cawley, aged twelve, head
frightfully crushed; Anna, four years
old, and Raymond, six years old.
1t is reported that the two other in
jured will die
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1902-10-17
SITUATION GROWS WORSE.
Twenty-Five Villages in Macedonia
in Complete Revolt.

Twenty-Five Villages in Macedonia
in Complete Revolt.
London, Oct. 14.-A dispatch to the
Daily Mail from Volo, Greece, says
twenty-five villages in Macedonia are
in complete revolt and that half a
battalion of Turkish troops had been
annihilated by insurgents in the Krez-
ma defile.
This news, continues the dispatch,
emanates from sources which have
heretofore minimiZed the trouble.
The situation, consequently, appears
suddenl; to have grown worse.
Berlin, Oct. 1.-THE Vossiche lei
tung publishes a dispatch from Sofia
announcing the Macedonian insur.
gents have been victorious along the
left bank of the Struma river and that
they have seized the mountain pass
between Melnik and Serros.
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1902-10-17
OPERATORS WILL ABIDE BY DEcl'
SION OF COMMISSION NAMED
y L
BY PRESIDENT.
RESULT OF CONFER
ENCE Between ROOSEVELT
AND MORGAN.
BELIEVED THE PROPOSAL WILL
BE- SATISFACTORY TO THE
MINE WORKERS.

Washington, Oct: 14.-The coal oper.
ators have agreed to the appointment
of commission to be named by the
president of the United States to whom
shall be referred all questions at issue
between the companies and their en-
ployes, whether they belong to union
or not, and the decision of the commits
sion shall be accepted by the oper-
ators.
The commission is to consist of an
army or navy engineer officer, an ex-
pert mining engineer not connected
with the coal mining properties, one OF
the judges OF the United States courts
of the Eastern district of Pennsylvania,
man of prominence, eminent as So
biologist, and man who by active par
ticipation in mining and selling coal
is familiar with the physical and COM
mercial features of the business.
The operators also make part OF
their proposition that the miners shall
return to work as soon as the commits
sion is constituted and cease all inter
ference with nonunion men. The COM
mission to name date when it's find
ings shall be effective and to govern
conditions OF employment between the
companies and their own employees for
at least three years.
The statement of the operators was
made public by authority of J. Pierpont
Morgan, who, with his partner, Robert
Bacon, and Secretary Root, was in
conference with President Roosevelt
at the temporary White House for an
hour and half. The proposition is be-
lieved by the administration to be sat
isfactory to the miners, as it covers
the proposition made by President
Mitchell of the United Mine Workers
Of America, with additional conditions
which, it is believed, the miners will
accept.
]. P. Morgan came to Washington
with his partner, Mr.. Bacon, at the re.
quest of the coal companies, who de-
sired that as matter OF courtesy their
statement should be, shown to the
president before it was made public.
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1902-10-17
KILLS WIFE AND CHILD.
Minnesota Man Exte,rrim,inates His Fam.
lily and Then Suicides. .#s H.

rs +
Minnesota Man Externinates His Fam.
lily and Then Suicides. ii. u.
Tracy, Mimi, Oct. IA horrible
tragedy, as a result of which three
PERSONS are dead and another injured,
occurred here. in the afternoon.
Ed Striker, a former resident of
this place, is the murderer. Stricken
was married some years ago to Miss
May Harvey of this place. Matrimo-
NAL troubles ensued, and some two
years ago Stricken and his wife sepa-
rated. One child was left with the
mother. A few. months ago Stricken
took the child from the mother Last
week he returned here with the boy
ana has since been in town.
In the afternoon he followed his
wife into the furniture store of Frank
McCallister, and pulling a revolver
from his pocket shot and killed his
wife and little boy. He then fired an
other shot, presumably at his father
ln-law, L. Parvey, who is an employee
OF McCallisler, but missed his aim
and the bullet struck McCallister, en-
terlng his face and tearing out one
jaw. Stricken then turned tLc revol-
yer on himself and ended his en- life.
Stricker's wife and child W. e killed
instantly, as was the murc ocer him.
self. McCallister is in a critical con-
dition, but hopes are entel .ained for
his recovery. The who4o affair &C.
Cured before any officer or other per-
son could interfere. Harvey and Nc
Callister were in the upper story OF
the store when the first shot was fired
and rushed down stairs to locate the
trouble. McCallister was removed to
his home here and is in charge Of
three nhvSjcianS
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1902-10-17
MADE NO COMMENT.
President Mitchell Has Nothing to
Say About the Statement.

President Mitchell Has Nothing to
Say About the Statement.
Wilkesbarre, Pa, Oct. 14-President
Mitchell, when shown a synopsis Of
tie statement issued from the White
House early in the morning, in which
the operators agree to arbitration, re-
fused to make any comment and i'm
EeGiately retired.
4 few moments later full copy OF
the statement was brought to strike
headquarters, but he refused to get
up to see it. The correspondents
talked with him through the transom
of his bedroom, and in answer to fur
Their questions he said he knew about
what the statement contained.
The three district presidents are at
their homes and cannot be reached
from here this morning for an expires.
sion of opinion on the new turn OF
affairs.
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1902-10-17
SAN FRANCISCO GETS IT.
Next Ercompmert Of the Grand Army
Of the Republic

Next 6EComPN1eHt OF the 1fanO army
Of the Republic.
Washington, Oct. II. - The Grand
Army Of the Republic has decided by
a large vote to hold it's encampment
in 1903 at San Francisco. Practically
the only competitor was Atlantic City
but a few votes were cast for Saratc
ga. The chances of the last mention
ed place were destroyed by the de-
cision of the New York delegation tc
support San Francisco and when the
solid vote of that delegation was cast
for the Pacific coast city it was recog
nized that Atlantic City's prospects
were also very slim. The vote was:
San Francisco, $40; Atlantic City
ITS. The selection of San Francisco
was then made unanimous. Before
the place Of meeting was chosen the
list of national officers was completed
A. w. Atchison of Texas was chosen
surgeon general and Rev. T. B. Shuey
of Kansas chaplain-in-chief.
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1902-10-17
THE WORK OF BURGLARS.
Prominent kentuckian Killed and Hi,
Son MORALLY Wounded.

Lexington, KY, Oct. ia. B.
Chinn, a dry goods merchant of this
city, one of the most prominent bus
mess men and Confederate soldiers in
Kentucky, was shot to death by two
masked burglars at $3.50 a. m. in his
bedroom at his bone in the south end
of the city. His son Asa, who heard
the noise, rushed to his fathers res
cue and opened fire on the burglars
with a rifle. The burglars returned
the fire aud Asa was perhaps MORALLY
wounded Citizens and police are
Searching for the murderers, but no
clue has as yet been found.
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1902-10-17
STEWART IS CHOSEN.
New Commander-in-Chief Of the
g.. Grand Army.

Washington, Oct. H. The Grand
Army of the Republic has elected a
new head for the ensuing year.
The new COMMUNICATIVE chief is Cen.
eral T. J. Stewart of Pennsylvania
who was leading candidate for the
honor year ago.
His competitors were General John
c. Black of Illinois, a former commits.
sioner of pensions, and Colonel John
McElroy of this city.
William M Oils of Massachusetts,
was elected vice commander-in-chief,
and James M. Averill of Georgia ju-
nior vice commander-in-chief.
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1902-10-17
Proposed Combine Abandoned.

New York, Oct 13.-After repeated
attempts to form a $60,000,000 combi-
nation of Southern cotton mills by
promoters of this city letters have
been sent out announcing the abandon.
ment of the scheme It was stated
that less than Is per cent of the mill
owners expressed q desire to enter the
combination, ~ ID .=#4:.. ssss
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1902-10-17
MOODY ON ANTHRACITE.
Secretary Of Navy Predicts That Out,
vii! Be Removed.

oeC1etdTy OF Navy FTeuTctS nat DUTY
vii! Be Removed.
Madison, Wis. Oct. 13.-Secretary
Of the Navy Moody, addressing a great
Republican concourse, declared that
the duty Of 81 cents ton on anthra-
cite coal was struggled into the tar
if act in sneaking and cowardly
manner" and ought to be repealed at
the short session of congress.
''The people," said&he, appealed in
vain to coal operators to cooperate
with the miners in efforts to bring
about an end to the strike.
''Now, when these operators appeal
to congress not to take off the duty
of 81 cents on anthracite coal their
appeals will likewise be rejected"
Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1902-10-17
GENERAL NoRD IN RETREAT

Army Of Haytian Provisional Govern
u ment Defeated.
Cape Haytien, Oct 13. = General
Nord, war minister, of the provisional
government, has been defeated and IS
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-07-06

nished. TIL Caps clothes was much
worn, as was most iv him. He must
have led a shockin' life. II is doubtful
II he viii liver raycover. FIR he is very.
very old He has been concealin' his
age FIR NANNY years. He is notory-
Gus prof1igate, as was well shown be tn
view we had. TIL fashlight pitcher iy
tn Cap viii appeal to all who know his
inner i1isthry.
An there We ARR Think " man
comm out in tn. light Nv day afther all
that. He can't get on clothes enough
TO cover him. He may bear himself
with a. naughty manner, but he feels
that ivry man he meets knows more
about him thin he knows himsilf. TIL
fellow on tn sthreet has. been within
tn walls. He's sayin' TO himsilf: 'Ye're
a hollow sham composed akelIy iv i'm
paired organs an antiseptic gauze' To
IN end if his life he'll niver be amy
thing more thin an annytomical chart
to his frinds. His privacy is over f'r-
1ver,' FIR what good cat II do annywan.
Hinnissy. to pull down tn blinds iv his
bed room If ivrybody knows exactly tn
size, shape an location iv his spleen?
No, sir: if I've got to be sick, give
me tn ordhn'ry dacencies iv poverty.
don't want amy man to know more
about me thin he can larn firm tn
handiwork iv Marks, tn tailor. an
Schmitt tn shoemaker, an firm tn
deceitful expression iv me face. If 1
have a bad heart, let him know it be
me eyes. On me vest is written, Thus
far an no farther They'se NANNY a
man on intimate terms with tn Impror
w Rooshya that don't know amy more
about me thin that I'm broadeloth on
Sundah an serge on week days An
1 don't intind they shall I hide behind
tn privileges iv me position an say:
Fellow citizens, docks an journalists,
I cannot inthrajooce We TO tn Inner
Man. He's a reecloose an avarse to
s'ciety. He's modest an shy an OBJ
jects TO callers. Ye can guess what
kind iv man I am. but 1 wudden't have
We know An 1 can do that as long
as I stay poor
I'm glad I'm poor" said Mr. Hen
messy.
1T gives We less to talk about. but
more to think about said Mr.. Dooley.
Copyright. 1902, by Robert Howard Rus
sell)
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-07-06

"Oh. l suppose this is Misera BILE he
said. Il can see a very poor Month
ahead of me-yes-not- Me wearing all
my Bells and taking a Hurdle every
Furlong''
He rushed into the Telegraph Office
and sent a Wire to her, so that it
would catch her at the first Station up
the Road. II said not to worry and to
take Good Rest, and everything was
moving along about the same as usual
With Love and Kisses.
After which he went over to the
Brewery TO see if they would make.a
Reduction on Wholesale Orders.
Hubby went up street with his Pan
anna dipped down in Front, the same
as the College Rakes wear them, and
his Coat was thrown wide open to show
the dizzy Pleats. His Cuban Blood was
all het up and he told himself that he
was 10 years old and never had a
Home.
oh, but he was Nifty.s He was out
of the Corral and into the Red Glover
and nix any Halter and Box Stan for
him. At least. not for a Month.
1t happened that he had the usual
number of disreputable Friends. They
were All Right, but he did not dare to
have them up to the House. because
Angel-Face had Investigated them and
returned True Bills. They were little
too Carney for Presbyterian Circles. but
they fitted right in at any Function
where every Man takes off his Coat.
Husband began 10 use the Telephone,
and in the course of an Hour he had
organized Pirate Crew that would go
as far as you like at any Game from
Pitch-snd- Toss TO AansIaughter.
For when a decent Married Man does
start out to find something different
from the calm Joys Of connubing in a
Side Street. he is the Village Limit
Husband had the whole Shop to him
self He employed a Senegambian who
was q good two handed Worker with
the Corkscrew. Then he had $40 worth
of Dutch Lunch sent in from the Raths-
keller, and arranged the Stacks of
Reds, Whites and Blues. He told him
self that the only True Enjoyment was
found in Bachelors Hall.
His Hicky Acquaintance came in
showing more or less Stage Fright, as
they were not accustomed to seeing
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-07-06
PREFERRED ANOTHER DEATH.
His Wife Did Not Want Him to Be
Burned
washington Starr

washington Starr
A friend of mine who has been married
only a short time has been twitting his
wife considerably because of = remark
she made the other day when under great
excitement" said a Washington gentle
man TO a Star reporter The immediate
circumstances were somewhat ira gle brIf
since the end was happy l suppose il can
be called a comedy
Ny friend purchased one of those cabi-
net bath arrangements about a week ago
and one day this week decided 10 fix IL
up and enjoy its benefits He got him
self fastened into the thing and touched
IL off, but something must have gone
wrong with the contraption. for no sooner
had he gotten settled than the thing ex-
pioded.
His wife, hearing the noise. burst into
the room, and seeing the smoke and
flames. to say nothing of the tub. enEel-
oping her husband, she lost her head. IND
Precarious condition she went over TO
the wall and begin dealing it siedge-
hammer blows with both fists. With tears
streaming from her eyes she Inconsistent
- cried:
Oh, John; get out. What a horrible
DEATH What horrible death, / woulGn' [
mind your dying in a natural way, but
to have you burned TO death
My friend finally broke from the burn
ing cabinet and kicked it out of the win
dow; then going over TO his frantic wife.
who was still landing on the wall like a
Fitzsimm0ns. he said. with mild sar-
casm: My dear. since You don't object
TO my dying in A natural way. have de-
She grabbed him with a shrek OF
joy and decided not to faint. He was
burned only slightly. and his wife says
she doesn't care how much he jokes
natural death since she still has John
alive and we'll