The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-08-18
SPOKEN IN JEST.

Detroit Free Press: VERY amusing are
the struggles our German friends nave
with the English vocabulary" remarked
a gentleman 1 met on the smokers plat
form.
I'VE had a religious revival in our
neiEhoorhood. and Annie our German
housemaid. decided to become a church
member 1t was a sect of a liberal creed,
some of whose members favored ba y
tism by immersion. some BY sprinkling.
We did not know which Annie prc-
ferred. and although the question was a
nice one with my wife, she did not
think best 20 urge or advise in the mat
evening, and the morning after Annie
presented herself with smiling face
Well Annie. said my wife, you
were baptized, were your
'Na-yeS,' said Annie. q lectle.'
we subsequently, learned that her lee
tie baptism was u sprinkling-
We never learned why she chose the
'Ieetle instead of the big
They certainly know more about poll
ties in Indiana than any other state in
the Union, said d travelling man In New
York. Every man IS a politician An
experience / had when I was stum2ins
the state in 1895 for Mckinley shows now
closely tabs are kept ] got off at Green
castle TO get a sandwich: and met pros
porous looking man at the lunch counter.
how are things politically2 | asked him.
on first rate he said. We've got 'em
this year. sure Got whom / asked.
" ~ N4tE ItluOEfdNH- " We b%eil likHL-
ing them for years. and we've brought the
Democratic majority in this county down
so that We tied EN- last time This time
wen whip 'em. Why, stranger. three Re
publicans have moved into the county,
and there amt q family in the county
with a sick Republican in it. We can't
lose
@ . G
Philadelphia Times: Congressman
Bingham is telling in Philadelphia about
the handsome and popular wife of a sem
9 a,r VINO mas been well to the fore in
Washington affairs since last December.
Mrs, Senator was recently accosted at
a very fashionable reception by an over
dressed. affected woman, the wife of a
western lobbyist, and asked:
Have We met before? Your face seems
very. very familiar 10 me.
Il do not think We've met replied Mrs.
Senator. graciously. Perhaps you've seen
my pictures There have been many of
them in the magazines recently
That's it," exclaimed the stranger
want YOU TO tell me. if you will, is that
say it is?'
@ % o
have an error corrected" said the sturdy
youngster in the sailor suit who had made
his way TO the city editors desk.
What is the trouble?"
Whenever you make any references TO
the dangers OF a Fourth OF July cele-
bration you speak of the small boy as
EAc WOESH OF IL 1hGFS IS a man
in our house-a near relative-who is so
much afraid I viii hurt myself that he
wants to conduct the entire pyrOtechnic
display himself. while I stand in the par
Tor and look through the window. Last
year he was Obliged to wear medical
mask for two weeks, owing to the fact
that his whiskers took fire. But the les
son has made no impression on him, and
I wish you would call attention to the
fact that a small boy is a great deal
more at home with fireworks than q near
sighted man with large, dry whiskers-''
@ o @
New York Times: ESpjOrn. a Swedish
gentleman. fond of telling anecdotes and
incidents gathered during a recent visit to
his native country, is responsible for this
addition TO. the 'absent-minded man Sc
rieS.
A professor in one of the Swedish uni
versities, having finished his labOrs for
the day, was about TO start home when
a fellow professor called his attention to
the violent storm raging outside and said:
why go home? Better remain at the
college tonight"
He walked over TO the window and sur
veyed the situation Yes. think
will he replied. nonchalantly, an all
absorbing topic Of the class room yet IN
mind
Soon afterward he was missing. and IL
was supposed that he had changed his
mind and gone home, but later he re-
appeared, with a bundle under his arm
and showing evidences OF having been
exposed to the storm. Something was
said regarding his errand-
Why" he replied. I've been home
after nv nightshirt-