The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1902-01-31


recent speech in Baltimore said: II re-
member during my service in the United
States Senate when we had quite sharp
division in our ranks. One very great
man introduced resolution, which some
OF us thought was unwise. He made a
nalf-hour speech. full Of eloquence and
force. in favor of this resolution. Jus:
before he sat down | caught his eye and
shook my head. The great man turned
ut once to the president. MIR. Presi-
dent. he said, that was one side of the
question. There is another side He
then spoke with equal eloquencc and
fforce against the resolution for half an
hour. He said it was too serious
matter to take snap judgment on, and
S ,,l by moving to adjourn: Afterward
ne came over to me and asked: ''What
the devil is it ell about, anyway?'
Benson-"Talk about the lamentab]t:
state Of the public service! Why, there's
\est0r. for instance. He has been ir
p'iollc office for twenty-five years. and
what, | should like to know, has he eve:
accomplished?''
Weston-:'Well, he has had job all
that time. Surely, that's something's
Boston Transcript.
y man from Dunedin once visited 1.-THE
town of) Wellington. An Irish friend
insisted upon the visitor staying at his
house, instead of at Il hotel, and kept
nm there for Il month. playing the host
III detail, even to treating him to thea
ters and other amusements, paying all
the cab fares, and the rest. When the
visitor was returning to Dunedin the
freshman saw him down to the steam
a parting drink.
What'll YOU have?' asked the host.
continuing his hospitality to the very
last.
NOV, look here said the man from
dunedin. I'll haze nae mair o this
here we've been keepin, me at Yer house
tor Il month an payin' for a the thea
tiers an cabs. an drinks. l tell ye I'll
stan nae mair o. it! Wen just hac
toss for this one"' -Scotsmun
Callcr-~.For goodness sake, what
that noise?'
Hauskeep-"Cirl next door is having
her voice cultivated
, ca!ler.: Il What are they doing,
Han<kee1-'*I don't know. but the
sound of it is narrowing. Philadelphia
Press.
What does your husband dor asked
traveller out West Of slatternIy wom-
:a % %'2 IN he fSsa1 Sns in % w Ss
the reply. he's one O these handy gifted
sort Q. persons, my man is. He kin jest
smith by perfession, but he cooked in
rest rant III town most O last winter.
and he done kyarpenterin' and paintin'
all spring, and then he lectured on tem-
p,rance awhile until he got chance to
run an milne fer month or two, and
then he dug two wells and hung wall
bef at 81 G Ga5 soq1 nd Sh %s to lay ~
doing now?' asked the amused stranger.
Ieachin' singing school; but he allows
to give it up pretty soon and go to prac-
tlcln medicine. He kin do anything he's
mind to turn his hand to-
Cassidy-"Why don't ye ate yer din
ner?'
Ga; C:asey-.shure this is Froiday, an
Cassidy--"What are We WONDERING"
Casey-''Is turtle soup fish whin its
made out O veal?'- Philadelphia Press
small boy who lives at an import ant
railroad center had been accustomed to
visiting the station and making friends
with the officers of the company. He
persuaded his aunt to play train with
him the other day. He arranged the
chairs in a lire and then said: Now.
tor. Lend me your watch and get up i'll
to the cab He then hurried down the
platform, timeDiece in hand.
Pull out, YOU reti-neaded, pic-faced
jay" he shouted to the astonshed young
woman. "Why, Willier' she exclaimed
III Amusement.
':That's right. chevy the rag he re-
tod Dull nl,f
late already"
That boy is not allowed to fraternize
with railroad men any morc-New York
Evening Sun.
1T is sad" murmured the Musing
rheorizer::. ito think that every man has
his price,
EYES," admitted the Intensely Practi-
cal Worker. land it is sad fact that
half the time he can't get it."-TitBits.
Patrick had worked hard all his days,
but his sons had spent his money for
him. and when he was too old for active
work he was offered the position of cross
ing tender at small railroad station. ,
He looked dubious as the duties Of the
meaning of the various flags was clearly
stated.
In case of danger, with a train
coming, Of course you wave the red flag"
said his friend, proceeding with his ex-
PLANTATION. A hard old hand grasped his
arm.
"Man. dear. it'll never do said Pat
rick. shaking his head solemnly. II
could never trust mesilf to reminder to
wave a red flag whin there was a green
wan handy. '-Youth's Companion.
-:o:-
''Somc people say lunch and some
say luncheon and yet both mean the
same thing"
Il don't think SO. I fancy lunch is
masculine ard luncheon feminine.'-
philadelphia Press.
The amusing mistakes that people
make in the matter of foreign phrases
are we'll exemplified by the proprietor of
a Samson street restaurant. Gaudy pink
cards, advertising his place of business
are. being distributed, containing this as
tonishing sentence: THE - cafe is
not only considered the bette noir place to
stop for refreshments. but the excellence
of its service and viands commands the
respect of all fair-minded people," It is
suspected that the proprietor has been
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