Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1902-12-29
SCHEME DIDN'T WORK
clEVER IDEA THE CAUSE OF
MlSUNDERGTAN

| i'ossIbIlity That Mrs. Titus Might DC
Wiser Than Eier Mother Had Been
Overlooked by the Conspirators-
Story With a Moral.
Mr.. Titus has it III for his father
'n-laW, The old gentleman is in no
Sise to blame. but Titus has to fight
i out with somebody, so he vents his
spleen on the leader of the opposi-
| sion.
1t all came about through Titus
close management. Titus owns a fur
aiture store. He is not a stingy man,
by any means. but when he married
and got ready to furnish a fiat Of his
swn he concluded that it would be
neat stroke of economy to rid his
stock OF a few pieces of old-fashioned
furniture that hat. m marked down
20 per cent. by utili-thg them in his
own housekeeping.
Until the advent of the sideboard
his wife bore without complaining the
Importation of these antiquated mod
! els. Then she revolted.
Il wci t have it," she said decisive
! iy. II didn't think that of you George
Titus, / really didn't. | never dream
ed that you cared less for me than
for the customers that came into your
store. If | had dreamed of such a
thing | wouldn't have married you.
Titus was dumhfounded. "Why,
aura" he said, what in the world is
the matter with you?'
There is nothing the matter with
me- she reterted. it's the sideboard.
Il is old-fasnioned and of a horribly
"y5y pattern, and | won't give it
ho' seroCm. want you to take it
risat back 10 the store. II you don't
IH see father about it
Titus meekly promised to think the
matter over, and later in the evening
he saw father" himself
oh. you mustn't worry about lit
tie thing like that" said his newly
acquired relation, consOlln2ly.
Fauras 5 like her mother. She's lit
tie to4chy, that's all It's easy
enough to manage her when you
know how. Just give her rope
eauHs,a snd she'll soon hang herself" 3"
Titus FASTENED to explain that he
was not anxious to precipitate any
such tragedy thus early in his mar
ried life, and reverted to the side
board.
Yes, yes,' said the old gentleman.
! That's all right. | saw the side
! board, and very nice one it is, too
the incest one you had in the store,
in my opinion. II Laura had seen it
in the salesroom first she would prob
ably have thought so, too. You'll have
: to cure her as l cured her mother.
she found fault with a sofa l had
bought and declared she wouldn't
have it in the house. l moved the
tn av'ay and put it in roomfull
of other sofas. The next day l took
her down to the store and told her to
! take her choice, whereupon she pick
| ed out the very identical sofa she had
rejected the day before. I'd advise
you to play the same trick ON Laura
The plan will be sure to work"
Titus thanked his father.in-law fer
vently.
: Il will said he "Ill do it to.mor-
row.
Early the next morning he had the
sideboard carted back to the store,
ard in the afternoon he invited his
wife to come down and select another
one. He led the way into a large
room on the second floor where side
boards of all shapes, sizes and prices
reflected the anxious faces of Mr.. and
Mrs. Titus as they passed to and fro
in review of the shining wares. Pres.
entity Titus adroitly directed her into
the aisle where the discarded side
board stood in all it's last years hu-
mility. Mrs. Titus spotted it ten feet
away.
Good gracious, George" she said
What did you put that thing in here
for? Nobody will buy it. You'll nev-
er get ride of IL unless you give it
away. 1t is too prehistoric for any
use"
Then she went on few steps
further and chose the most expensive
sidehoard in the lot. That is why
Iit,s is mad at his father-in-law. The
cid gentleman maintains that it is not
: his fault if Mrs. Titus is smarter than
Ie' mother was at the same age, but
Titus hints Conspiracy" and storms
most unreasonably. Philadelphia
Ledger.