The Intermountain Catholic. (Salt Lake City [Utah] ;) 1899-1920, 1902-11-15
HIGH JINKs AT GOAT RIDING.
Some "reminiscences of the Ancient
Order of 'Sons of Malta"
CTerre Haute EXnress.l


When Ed Johnson was asked the price
OF oysters the other day, somehow h;
switched off to the Sons of Malta" Per
maps an association of ideas made hin
think of how the Sons made a clam o
him. The Sons of Malta were a secret or
| ganization in Terre Haute about thirty
I'VE to forty years ago that played "HiSi
Jlnks" in their hall on Third street, anC
many old settlers still laugh as they re
member their initiation ceremonies, which
they could not forget if they would, ac
cording to Mr.. Johnson's experience. He
told about his inhalation, which he would
not have dared to do when the order wa.
alive and looking for fresh victims.
He was about is when he was decoyeC
into joining by j. c. NcGregor, wei
known doctor, and others of similar
standing. He said he wouldn't join if tnc
Inhalation was at all rough. They assured
him they would have him put in under q
"d1spensation." He was conducted into
the grand hall with string of neophytes
Among the members of that time were
many of our departed worthies-B. w
Hanna, D. w. Voorhees,, Grafton Cooker
ly, c. D. Wood, Thomas H. Nelson, Jo-
seph H. Blake, l.. A. Smith and others as
we'll known.
The candidates were airily attired and
blindfolded. Mr.. Johnson was then a clerk
for Mr.. Doughty, keeper of a saloon and
cafe, the most popular place on Main
street A solemn party asked him ques-
tons: Your occupation?' CLERK.
Clerk in what?" I'm a cafe "It is re-
corded that you sell intoxicating liquors.
Mr.. Cookerly'S voice arose from the rear
OF the hall, saying: He is a poisoner!
and the whole order repeated in reproach-
full chorus, He-is-a-poisoner. The ap-
plicant began to think he wouldn't pass
Further questions of most searching
and impudent character were asked. as
every member who knew anything of a
candidate had previously passed it in. The
worse 1t was the more sure it was to be
numbered out in that hall. When the
victims tried to be smart or defend them
selves, Lyn Smith, or some one, would
leVlty-ls the grand council OF ten pres
ent? Let them come forward" The
grand council of ten, led by Captain WOOD
marched up and surrounded the neophyCe
and grounded arms with a bang.
After the victim had been well terri
1led, he was set upon a revolving chain,
such as was used in old horse powers, and
1t VISA started. He was still blindfolded,
and when he thought he was up about
thirty feet a voice called: How much
water is there in the grand tank?" and
the answer came: six fathoms, mark
twain Another voice solicitously asked
MIN If he could swim, and bade him good
bye, as he was going to cross a stream
from which few returned. He was showed
off and fell into sheet and was vigor-
ousiy tossed. When he landed, he was
walked around to get warm, although he
was sweating great drops, and then was
damned down on block of ice, his cloth
ing was very thin, and then led to very
hot chair under which a lamp was burn
ing, piece of ice was drawn across his
chest, feeling like a sharp knife, and if he
Malta.
When Mr. Cookery was sworn in he
was told the order was really a military
organization, whose purpose was the an
neXation of Cuba. How did he feel about
1t? He was opposed to it. D. w. Voor-
bees talked beautifully to him on the
wrongs of Cuba, and Mr.. Hanna fol-
lowed, till Mr.. Cookery consented to the
annexation of Cuba. Would you. sir,
be willing to lie in ambush and attack
the tyrants of Cuba?" For the good OF
the order, he would. Would you be will
ing to steal upon the enemy and attack
him. For the good of the order, he
would, said Mr.. Cookery. Let it be re-
corded that the candidate says he would
be willing to lie and steal' and the whole
order chanted the same, while the candi-
date insisted that what he really said
should be entered, and a loud voice called
There is too much levity among the can
dldates. Is the grand council of ten in
conclave?" and so on. There never has
been such times since, as our respected
predecessors used to have in the hall of
the Sons of Malta.