Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1902-01-24
THE DAILY
SHORT STORY.
Married at = =
Railroad Speed


and Q. railway and finding the smok-
ing car crowded. 1 went into the bag
gage car. was putting quietly when 1
was startled by farmer sitting on
trunk exclaiming:
NO. 14O1, by thunder"
The baggageman looked at him in
Quiringly.
"An' you're the bdggageman too"
"Of course I'm the baggageman."
you was a-runnin' this car when we
he'd a weddin' an weddin' tower all
to onct," replied the farmer.
you don't mean it,
81 do mean it, an 1 never see any
one connected with that little affair
that 1 don't shiver, an then l want to
hug 'em. | have had some close shayes
in my life, an that was the closest l
ever had. If it hadn't been fur that
Teller that fust helped us out an then
prevented my gettin' a bullet through
my head, I'd "a been slumberin' al
these years in our buryin' ground"
You refer TO the time when the gun
went off," said the baggageman. Il
confess 1 was as much frightened as
you were. To tell the truth, after 1
heard the report l expected TO see you
:alI and was surprised when you
didn't"
"AIy friends" said, offering both a
Havana cigar. Il never can bear to see
people enjoying a good thing without
sharing in the amusement. Tell me
the story"
you see, stranger, Ann Eliza Per
kins m me, bein' bent on Sitten hitch
ed, an me not bein' acceptable to the
ole man, we lighted out one mOrnin'
from her home in her paws buggy,
calculatin' to ketch the train fur Quin-
cy that stopped at our station ut 5:35.
"Waal, we was a-drivin' silentlike
outen the gate when up goes winder.
an ole Perkins head stuck out. l give
the mare n cut, an we went lickety
split down the road. We he'd three
miles to make to the station an twen-
" minutes to do it in. But it didn't
make no difference as to our time. 1t
was the time OF the train an the time
the ole man would make a-chasin' us,
fer we knowed he'd follow with his
gun. We made the station in fifteen
minutes. but as we wasn't on prairie
we couldn't see whether the train was
a-comin' or not. Fact was the track
run around the base of n hill, an we
couldn't even hear the engine a-putfin'.
"You bet that was long five min
utes, Ann Eliza up on the platform
a-lookin' fur her dad, me with my ear
down on the rails a-listenin' fur the
train.
".He's a-comin'r cried Ann Eliza,
a-turnin' pale.
"'So's the train, said I, a-shakin'
with excitement. a-hearin' the rattlin'
of the wagon an the click of the train
on the rails.
'When the train drawed up, we got
inter the baggage car. to be furtherest
from the ole man. When we moved on,
put my head outen the door, an there
he was, a-hangin' on to the rail of the
last car.
"'Game's upr I said. lugubrus.
"'Not a Bit said Il Chicago drum
mer who had folleyed us inter the car.
Wonder eff there's n parson aboard
There's no time to find out i
said. 'S'pect the ole mans a-comin'
through the train mighty fast
"'Ill play parson myself said the
drummer. an. whippin' off his cravat.
he tied n white handkerchief around
his neck, buttoned up his coat, borryed
n pair of spectacles an told us to stand
up afore him fur to be married.
81 hain't a-goin' 20 be married by
bogus parson,' said Ann Eliza. L want
a certificate. an a ginuine one too
"'You don't catch on to the game
said the drummer. When the ole man
comes, he'll think you're married, that
he's too late to break off the match, an
he'll give you his blessin'. Soon's you
reach Quincy you kin git n minister
an be married regular
This pacified Ann Eliza, an we
stood up afore the drummer. He had
only time to yell as the door opened,
Man an wifer Perkins, SEEM he was
too late, leveled his gun at me, but the
drummer was spry an knocked it up,
an there, by gum, is the hole the ball
made in the roof
"'Ole man. said the bogus parson,
a-drawlin' his words, why try to sep
arate those who hev been Joined to-
gether in the holy bonds of wedlock?
Would you send this young man away
from his bride afore his time"
''Then the ole man broke down. He
see how near he'd been to murder, an
he was too late to save his daughter
from a-marryin' me. which. 1 reckon,
was bad piece of luck fur Ann Eliza.
He began to cry. an Ann Eliza went to
him an put her arms aroun' him an
begun to cry. an 1. not to be out in the
cold, begun to cry, an the bogus par
son-he was really a soft hearted Teller
tux his handkerchief from his neck
an filed 1t copiouslike.
"'How could you hev done itY sob
bed the ole man.
"'oh. paw cried Ann Eliza, it
hain't-
"sMy dear' said the drummer inter-