davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1902-07-10

ev'y othah good hoss on de place. 7
tole him he might keep the other
/ horses if 1 couldn't git 'em out Of him,
but that l must have the carriage
horses, for my mistis was a lady and
her foot want 'quainted wild de
groun'
But your mistress is a rebel said
| Marse General
| Den l says: I don know nothin'
bout no rebel, Marse General. l ies
Knows dat my mistis' foot amt quaint
ed wild de groun', and Use boun' to
hab does carriage bosses back
Wild dat, Marse General laugh and
hollered to man not very far off, all
dressed up in blue clothes and prass,
and says
Come here, major, here's some
thin fer yo' to hear.
But when Marse General said dat I
seed a twinkle in his eye, and
knowed somethin' I'd said hit him in
de right place. De major come. an |
tole EN- bofe de same tale. AS / got
through the major and the general
laughed, and de genera says
Well, Nanny, if you recognize
the carriage bosses you shall have
them
And dey riz up, bofe of 'em, to go
wild me to the pen whar the soldiers
mad put the bosses dey stole. AS we
wen long I says
"Marse General, of cose I knows nv
own bosses, but them bosses gwine to
recognize me de minute dey slap dere
eyes on me-
An, 'fo' God, de minute dey saw
me comm twixt dem two fine white
men dey pricks up dey ears an trotted
up to me jes as natural as if dey had
been circus bosses. And, mistis. de
general tole one of de soldiers to put
brand new halters on desc horses
necks and han 'em over to NANNY,
and here dey is, and l amt took no
oat nor nothin' se."-Washington
Post
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1902-07-10
INSANITY EXPERTS INSANE

out IN Seattle " said a PHILADELPHIA
physician who returned from there
recently, they are wrought I'D over
the fact that an alienist, or student of
insanity, has himself become insane
Ihey regard that as a singular coin.
cldence. But it is not, as a matter of
TACT, singular at all. 1t is an occur-
renee only too common. The father
OF Gustave Flaubert, the French nov
ellst, was al alienist and died insane
mere are hundred other such cases
and L know in this city three or four
allenlsts who are queer, and who will
undoubtedly, some day, go quite ont
OF their minds. These facts. Won
might think, prove that insanity. like
dlphtheria or the smallpox. is con-
taglous. 1t is not quite so bad as that
however The truth of the mailer is
that the physician who has a strong
inclination toward the study of in
sanity must possess a peculiar mind
certain sensitive, delicate, Slightly
morbid mind. His mind, receiving
daily for years impressions that are
strange and horrible, becomes. in the
end, sometimes, itself diseased. T
dont know what is the percentage of
allenlsts who have gone mad. but T
fancy that it must be large"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1902-07-10
A SPEAKING LIGHT.

The Speaking light" is the latest
novelty which has made it's appear
ance in Paris. 1t is the invention of
a German professor, improved and
perfected by NJ. Charles Heller, an
electrical engineer residing in France.
The apparatus consists of an ordinary
arc lamp, minus the globe; this lamp
is placed on a table, and is connected
on the one hand with a microphone,
which can be placed at any distance,
even miles away. On the current be-
ing passed and the lamp alight any
body singing or speaking in front or
over the microphone board is immedi-
ately heard by everybody in the room
where the lamp is placed. The arc
lamp reproduces every sound with
startling clearness.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1902-07-10
COMPANIoNABLE MOTHERS,

There are many conscientious
fathers and mothers who make them
selves and their children miserable by
taking youthful foibles to seriously.
1t is an innate propensity of child
possessed of the average good health
and spirits to make older people laugh
with him; not at him, but at the
things that seem amusing to his own
sense. And the mother who has the
bGthe and ready humor to enter into
his fun becomes his most Fascinating
companion.
He needs her rebukes and bends to
her correction without ill-feeling,
where sternness would arouse his
pride and ire, for he is assured thai
she is ready to share all his innocent
FRANKS, and that her disapproval has
no foundation in Impotence or In
justice.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1902-07-10
GlEANINGS AND GOSSIP.

A Weighty -Edith-What
on earth made you break off the
engagement? thought you were aw-
fully in love with him. Madge-I was,
but Rover couldn't bear him.-Brook-
lyn Life.
AT Moscow savings bank has been
opened for the purpose of assisting
prospective brides to obtain the neces-
sary dowry for catching husbands.
DoWries are expected to range from
500 to s1,5OO
Ex-soldiers will in future be en-
ployed as clerks in all departments OF
the British war Office Preference will
De given to such as posses first-class
certificates of education, or have been
lnvalldated from active service by
wounds Or sickness.
A Philadelphia paper declares that
Archbishop Ryan was recently about
to take a train for Baltimore at the
Broad-street station, when a Young
man accosted him, saying: seYour
face is familiar, where in hell have T
seen your Il really don't know" re-
piled the archbishop, blandly; "what
part OF hell do you come from?o
The richest Chinaman in America
Chin Tan Sun, came across the Pacific
IN the steerage as boy. He married
a white woman and started a lottery
business in San Francisco. Now he is
a multi-millionaire.
In consequence of the severe
weather in France droves of wild
noars have begun ravaging the fields
around Tarbes, and the inhabitants are
organizing boar hunts in self-defense
UP to the present nearly so of the ami
mails have been killed.
An erratic inventor has devised a
staircase which plays tunes as it is
walked upon. A series of pins are
pressed by the feet and play gongs and
drums, while others are connected with
collapsible chambers, which blow
trumpets and similar instruments.
The latest theory in connection
with drowning is that heat, properly
applied, with artificial respiration, Will
resuscitate persons who have cen I'M
der water an hour This feat. it is
claimed, has cen accomplished by the
doctor who advances the theory.
Captain William Driver, a Salem
skipper, is credited with the bestowal
of the name "Old Glory on the stars
and stripes. 1t was in 1851, and the
flag to which he gave the name was
carried by the brig Charles Doggett all
around the world, and is now on ex-
hibition at the Essex institute Salem.
Prof. Clement L. Webster, geol-
ogist of Charles City, Ia, has discover
ed two groups of tombs OF the mound
builders along the Little Cedar river in
Floyd county, some miles northeast of
Charles City. The tombs are to be
explored, and it is believed that i'm
portant archaeological knowledge will
be obtained
Many years ago, when Senator In
gals was in the Senate, oleomargarine
was bone of contention. The debate
led Ingalls, to utter one of those cpl
grammatic sentences which made him
famous. II have never, to my knowl-
edge tasted oleomargarine," said In
gals, "but have stood in the presence
OF genuine butter with awe for it's
strength and reverence for it's an
tiquity."
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1902-07-10
NANNY GOT THE HORSES BACK.
Told Sheridan "My Mistis' Foot Amt
'Quainted Wild de Ground.v

Gen. Sheridan was resting from a
raid during the war in camp near a.
flre Old mansion in Virginia The
former master of the mansion had
been killed in the battle of Manassas.
Nanny, who had been the mis-
tress's chief comforter when this
event occurred, had practically taken
charge of the plantation and had run
things pretty much to suit herself.
Sheridan's soldiers had taken every
sound horse on the place, including
two carriage horses. After the raid
was over, Nanny" entered the house
to find her mistress and the two
children weeping bitterly. Nanny"
asked
Child, what in de worP is de mat
ter?' The lady replied between
sobs:-
Nanny, they've taken the carriage
horses, and an officer tells me we'll
never get them again unless l take the
OATH
Den, chile, take de oaf. 'Tain't so
berry bad, is it? You TUX lie Widout
puckering yo' mouf when yo' was a
baby. 1 made you take many a dose,
and now brace up and take de oaf."
"Oh, Nanny" the lady walled. st
cannot do it. I don't think Jack would
| like it,
Cant see, honey, what Massa
Jacks got it do wifi it. He's dead and
| buried. But if you can't take de oaf,
I'll go see if l can't do it fer you.
Anyhow, Use gwine to investigate
Marse Phil Sheridan and git them car
riage horses back, if 1 has to pretend
to take pizen to do it,
Nanny put on her brightest
bandanna handkerchief, a clean white
apron, and started for the camp, which
was about mile distant.
In about an hour Nanny" walked
back into the large yard in front of the
! house, leading by each hand car
riage horse, wearing a brand new
halter around his neck The mistress
saw her coming and met her at the
| front gate.
How on earth did you get them,
Nanny" inquired the lady.
Mammy's black face was damp with
| perspiration and her fat chest fairly
painted for breath. She said: Lem
| me set down on de grass, honey, and
cotch my BRET. Set down by me an
| III tell yo' all about it. l got to de
| campt and I asked two or three men
| in uniforms with muskets in dey hans
to tell me whar I could find Marse
| Phil Sheridan.
| What do you want with him?'
Oats my business says l. After
| skirmishing round l foun' de generals
tent. I walks in and draps my best
curtsey. 'Sarvant, Marse General |
| says.
What kin I do for you, madam p
he says.
I amt no madam, Marse General;
Use plain ole black nanny I seed a
| twinkle in his eyes, and he says
well, Nanny, what kin I do fer
yo'?'
can bless you soul, honey, he said
/ that nanny jes as natural as If he
| had ben a born gentleman. Den I
'splained dat his soldiers had stole
my mistis' carriage horses as well. as
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1902-07-10
SONG.
IN among the tall weeds

IN among the tall weeds
There lives a briar-rose.
All among the rugged reeds
She bends and sways and CLOVIS.
The ragged bloom around her grows.
And rough and rude her bed.
But kisses Of the wind The knows
And bushes warm and red.
The sunny moor about her lies,
The stream runs blithe and clear,
She does not reck o. somber skies.
Nor knows the changing year.
She hath no ken O. Winter-drear,
Nor breads the frost and storm,
For summer winds have called har
dear,
She bushes red and warm.
Marie Van Worst in Scribner's.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1902-07-10
TOO MUCH RAIN.
Corn Suffering but Tobacco Plants
Look Well.

Corn Suffering but Tobacco Plant.
| Look Well.
The Wisconsin weekly crop bulletin
for July says the continued cool. wei
weather has been unfavorabIe fol
corn and interfered materially with
the harvesting of clover. Some
| farmers made an attempt at haying
but very little was secured in good
| condition. Wheat in some localities
is ready for harvesting but the ground
| is very soft. Warm weather is needed
Tor corn and for the ripening of grain.
The average temperature for the
week was slightly below that of the
| preceding week, the entire week
being exceptionally cool and serious ~
retarded the advancement of corn and
the rlpening Of small grains. Killing
| frosts occurred in some of the north
ern counties during the early part of
the week and in a few exposed
localities the damage was consider
able. Light frostS were reported from
some sections in the central counties,
but no material damage occurred.
The rains were frequent and gen.
orally heavy in the northern section
and seriously retarded the cultivation
of corn. One the 25th a heavy rain
storm passed over the central ana
southern portions of the state, &C
companied by high winds which
caused grain to lodge badly. The
ground is generally wet and very soft.
The cool weather during the week
was detrimental to corn, which is be-
coming yellow, especially on low lana.
Considerable cultivating was done
during the early part of the week In
the central and southern counties, es-
pecially on high ground. Corn on low
land is generally very weedy and the
stand poor. The condition of this
crop has declined considerably during
the week.
Rye is ripening rapidly and wheat
is turning yellow. The heads are re-
markably well developed and straw
heavy. The high winds of the 25th
caused considerable lodging, but no
great damage and the outlook for
heavy crops is exceptionally good.
Oats and barley are maturing rapidly,
the growth of straw is remarkably
heavy, except in the northern section
where the continued rains retarded
growth. Lodging is frequent, but
with warm weather little or NO
damage w. result.
Considerable clover was cut during
the week but the weather has not been
favorable for curing and some loss re-
suited. Hay is generally reported a
heavy crop in all sections of the
state. Pastures are in excellent con
dition. The early varieties are gen-
orally in bloom. Late paintings have
attained a good stand and the plants
appear be thrifty. Some damage
occurred in the northern and central
counties by the frosts during the
early part of the week.
Tobacco planting is nearly com
pleted. The plants are of a good
stand and appear strong and thrifty.
Warm weather is needed for rapid
growth. Apple trees are badly |
blighted and the outlook is not en-
couraging. Strawberries are only Il |
fair crop. Cherries, currents ana
blackberries are light crops ana
rather inferior in quality.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1902-07-10
LATE NEWS EPITOMIzED

At Cape Haytien the United States
gunboat Marietta arrived from San
Juan. The town is quiet
At Madrid a treaty of trade. COM
merce and amity between the United
states and Spain was signed.
At Union, Ark, Harvey Sexton
threw a stick of dynamite under Pink
Gibson, blowing him to pieces.
At Hartford, Conn, the plant of tia
Cape-Well Horse Nail company vas
destroyed by fire. Loss, $500, 000a
fully insured.
High wind storms in the neighbor.
hood of Momence, H., blew down
barns and railroad buildings and in
Jured twelve persons.
AT gainesville, Wis, Nels Herreid. 4
farmer, fell from load of hay and
broke his neck. He was the father
OF Governor Herreid of South Dakota.
The latter will attend the funeral.
Twenty-Five "rusticated" cadets OF
the royal military academy at Saad-
hurst left that institution, protesting
that they were not connected with the
recent incendiary fires started at the
college.
A tremendous downpour of rain
Thursday did great damage through
out southwestern Michigan. Fruit
crops suffered greatly. All railroads
out of Grand Rapids were tied up by
Washouts.
The betrothal is announced of Major
Ralph Hartzel of Denver and Miss
Mary Barber of Canton, Ohio, the
favorite niece of Mrs. Mckinley.
Major Hartzell is an attorney and dur
ing the Spanish war was com.
missioned by Mckinley as paymaster.
Governor Taft at Rome received a
cablegram from Secretary Root con-
tanning final instructions concerning
the note relating to the disposition of
the friars lands in the Philippines.
Major Porter delivered the note to
Cardinal Rampolla, papal secretary of
state.
There is bad washout on the
Chicago & Great Western due to
Leavy rains at Hicks, Iowa, a point
where the Northwestern crosses. Six
hundred feet of track are gone, also
a seven-span bridge. The North
western, too, suffered considerable
damage.
Harry Tracy, an escaped convict
from the Oregon penitentiary, COM
PEELED the crew of steam launch to
carry him from South Point to a spot
five miles from Seattle. He told his
companions on the voyage that he
killed his partner Merrill, because OF
some differences with him. It is be-
lieved, however, that Merrill, is some
where in the vicinity of Shelton where
his sisters live.
Secretary Root has received the Iol-
lowing reply from acting Governor
Wright of the Philippines to his con-
gratulatory cablegram: "a provincial
government was inaugurated il
Laguna July 1, thus completing the
establishment of a civil government
over all the civilized people of the
The acceptan J. Of
American authority and general
pacificatiOn is complete"
Four of the seven shoe factories in
Burlington, N. j., are idle by strike
of employees, which is expected to ex-
tend to the remaining three establish
ments. The seven factories employ
800 men and women. Of this num-
Der 700 are now out The strike was
the result of notice announcing that
when the works reopened next Mon
day none but non-union hands would
be employed.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1902-07-10
THE HAPPY, HAPPY FARMER,

/ Oh the happy, happy farmer, who
lives seven miles from town.
Has no furnace in the basement that
must be shaken down;
He doesn't have to hurry out to catch
the train and then
Work behind a desk and worry as the
slave of other men;
No superior berates him for the small
mistakes he makes,
He is not denied employment for some
little rule he breaks,
And he needn't, when he's weary from
the duties of the day.
Hurry to some distant station, dodg-
ing footpads on the way.
Oh the happy, happy farmer, he Just
husties out of bed
And goes, shivering for the kindling.
which he chops out in the shed:
Then, while NAV is getting breakfast.
he runs out to milk the cows
And to pry the frozen hay up from
dusty, musty mows;
Oh, he milks away at Bossy and his
hands are cracked and sore.
But he thinks with kindly pity of the
pale clerk in the store.
And he curries down the horses and.
at last, all hairy, goes
In to breakfast with the odor of the
stable in his nose
On the happy, happy farmer doesn't
have to pay a cent
To the landlord who is heartIess when
ne comes to claim his rent:
The luckless clerk is worried when
some other man than he
Is promoted to station where he
knows he ought to be,
And his wife-his poor wife-nags him
just because she cannot fly
10 a perch beside some neighbor who
is roosting rather high;
He must walk an aisle from morning
TILL they close the doors at night
And goes home to find the water in
the laundry frozen tight.
On the happy, happy farmer wades in
SAoW up 10 MS knees
Out to where the wintry demons have
been overturning trees.
ana ne chops and nearly freezes while
the mad winds howl away,
And the echoes of his mauling ring
among the trees all day;
The snow gets in his boot-tops, and the
frost bites at his ears,
While the noises he produces are the
only sounds he hears.
And at night he thaws the pump loose
and goes out to do the chores.
Wnere the snow, in long, thin ridges.
filters through the stable doors.
Oh the happy, happy farmer. what q
careless life he leads,
instead of always buying, he lust
raises what he needs;
HIS nelghbors don't ignore him # he's
not as rich as they
All ne mas to do is work to keep the
Old gray wolves away;
me coal man and the plumber never
crowd him to the wall,
he just keeps forever paying for farm
implements, that's all;
And at night he needn't dress and blow
three dollars for treat
Of beholding performance that's
worth fifty cents a seat.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1902-07-10

CARDS as indispensable to her economic
development, Russia is even now
very unfavorably situated, while her
position as a naval power, in time of
war, is even worse. The union Of her
Baltic and Black sea fleets would re-
quire a circuitous voyage, and the
passage of three narrow straits. one
Of which is prohibited to war ships
by international treaty, and at each
of which it would be impossible to
avoid battle with a superior enemy.
If the art of the engineer could do
anything to remove deficiencies so
great, it might be regarded as a GER
tainty that the Russians, who seem
to have a natural taste for vast pro-
jects, would be the first to call him in.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1902-07-10
Astronomical.

A Michigan man by the name Of
Moon got married. That was change
of moon. After awhile his wife pre-
sented him with daughter. That was
a new moon. He went out and got
drunk for joy. That was a full moon.
When he sobered up he had only Is
cents left. That was the last quarter.
When he got home his mother-in-1aw
met him with a rolling pin and then
there was total eclipse and he saw
stars
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1902-07-10
INDIVIDUAL SPOONS.
The Variety of Forks and Spoons In
creaseS Every Season.

creases Every Season.
- There is very little the woman Of
today eats for which she has not ner
special fork or spoon, and there are
all sorts and kinds of forks and
spoons for serving everything, from
pie to piccalilli. They are all useful
and make pretty and servicahle
presents. For individual use The
special pieces are not essential-an
ordinary spoon will answer for most
purposes. The soup spoon should
have a round instead of an. oblong
bowl, the bouillOn spoon is the same
shape, but smaller the individual
chocolate spoon the same shape ana
smaller still. The egg spoon is one
OF the most necessary of the in
dividual spoons, being small and short
of handle, with an oval bowl, but
broad and round at the end, and a
large spoon will not answer the pur-
pose. The ice cream spoon is a
trife larger and also broad at thu
end. In getting an individual article
for eating cream the ice cream fork is
pACISl dUlSy USluS SudpCu IlhC iuS
spoon, but having the end of the
bowl separated into three broao
prongs.
Servers are useful, one might al
most say necessary. A lettuce work
for instance, has a long, slender
handle and three slender spreading
| prongs slightly hooked. These are
excellent for manipulating the lettuce
as they hold it securely witho IL
bruising it. A horseradish spoon has
narrow, square, oblong bowl with
rather a long handle, and slips easily
in and out of the horseradish bottle
An olive fork, with three tines and d
| long handle, is good, but an olive
spoon, with long handle and narrow
perforated bowl, is better. A
| chocolate "muddler" is a convenIent
spoon, having a round bowl like the
individual chocolate spoon, but long
handle is useful in "muddling" tnf
chocolate before serving. A tie;
caddy spoon is rather deep silve
shovel, with a short handle.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1902-07-10
French Dressino.

Make The dressing as follows. Mix
together one-quarter of teaspoonfu1
OF white pepper, one-half teaspoontul
OF salt and three tablespoonful CT
good olive oil. When the salt has
dissolved, add while stirring vigor-
ously one tablespoonful of vinegar
and stir until the dressing is slightly
tblckened. Lemon juice may be useo
IN place of the vinegar, if preferred.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1902-07-10
Not in PickWickian Sense

Senator Tillman may as well hang
up his pitchfork. In the Newfoutld-
land legislature the other day Repre-
sentative Morane called the Minister
OF Finance "a liar, a bumptious, noisy
cad, braggart, coward, an ass,
blackguard, and vile character
There was no Pickwickian sense about
it, either.-Milwaukee Sentinel.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1902-07-10
Peace May Be Possible.

well, the last Filipino chieftain has
come in," remarked the Observant
Boarder.
"Now if the New England junta will
only surrender we may have peace.
added the Cross-Eyed Boarder-Pftts-
burg Chronicle Telegraph.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1902-07-10
Took 1t Literally.

He had half dollar, which he was
holding to his ear.
Huh" he exclaimed scornfuiIy, 'T
don't believe you know what you're
talking about.''
''Why?' demanded his father in sur
prise. What did I say?"
you told Mr.. Smith when he was
here last evening that money talks,
but can't get a word out of it."