The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1902-07-11

For three delightful moons. 4 ~
The preachers take Vacations;
Their congregations say
1t would not do to have them work
And never rest a day.
What! Weary in we'll doing?'
Well not exactly that
But brains that get no rest BECOME,
At times, exceeding fat.
The preachers take vacations
When summer days are here,
When freest flows the amber juice
The S,Aful ones cal heeI.
The preachers take vacations
And so where breezes buzz
And leave their work to Others but
- st. Louis Post spatch.
~" '' -:O:-
Down in Georgia, according to my
friend, Capt. Lyerly, who ought to know,
lives man who is noted for his. love of
ease, but whose wife is sufficiently
hustler to almost make up for his chronic
disinclination to activity.
One cold night he went to bed, leaving
some bags of grain out. Of doors which
should have been placed in the barn for
protection against the weather, to say
nothing of thieves. But then, they don't
have many thieves in Georgia.
During the night the hero Of this story
awoke and thought that he heard some
thing which sounded like rain. He was
or not, for If it were,y he wanted an op-
portunity to worry aabout~ that grain. or
perhaps hint to his wife and then 80 to
sleep. while she slipped out and attended
to it. ,<,.
He thought the matter over for some
time and then hunched the good woman.
Nancy ~
what is it, John?'' !
us it rainin'?"
Il don't. know, John" g..
j. 81 wisht knew ~,
"Why don't you get up and see, then?'
Il hate to; I'm just awful sleepy y
"Well, then, go to sleep and never
Wall. ! I'd like to know. Hits right
''Then 60 and see."a = e
"You 60, won't you, Nancy?"
mo, won't-so now, you lazy thing,
John lay and reflected for. some: min
utes, then awoke his wife again and said:
.'I'll tell We what We might do, Nancy. Ye
might git up an let the dorg out. :. He'll
git back in. Ye en- let i'm in an then feel
O him, an if hits a-rainin' he'll be wet,
an if hit amt he won't be an then
hit'n be all right" Henry NJ. Wiltse in
Lippincott.
Harry Sobenheimer, truant officer of
the Twenty-frst district, recently made
a call at the home of a pupil whose alb
sence had extended over week, and in
CURED of the lads mother, genial look
ing Irish woman, the cause.
"Why," she said, "he's now past his
thirteenth year, an me and his father-r
think he's after-r having schOOln'
enough, sor."
schooling enough?'' repeated the Off
Ger. "Why, did not finish my educa-
amazement. Then, reassuringly, after a
moments thoughtful pause, ''well, sor,
yez see, that boy of ours has b-r-rains.' y
Philadelphia Times.
The party in the smoking room of the
steamer was talking Of Irish wit and the
Quickness thereof. Several gave personal
! experience, and one man, to his sorrow,
tried to use an old story. Then spoke
the agent fol. an exporting house.
Il was coming up the South American
coast on sailing ship last winter" he
said, when this happened. There was
Norwegian in the crew who was abso,
lutely fearless aloft. He did a number
| of tricks for us one afternoon, and as a
| grand finale stood on his head on top OF
| the mainmast. We held our breaths un.
til he swung himself back into the rig.
81 would like to see any of you dc
that he boosted when he reached the
deck.
81 can do it, said little Irishman
one of the kind who will never be
! 'stumped.' 4 can do it, and forthwith
he started up the mast.
| -, l.
that he knew nothing about moving about
aloft, and the captain yelled at him
through the megaphone to come down be-
fore he killed himself. He howled back
that he was going to stand on his heaC
first. He reached the crosstrees, and was
actually putting his heels into the air
when the ship rolled and down he came
We held our breaths again.
Fortunately, he struck in the sag of 6
loose sail, bounded off and lit on the
deck on his feet.
! "I'd like to see any OF you do that!
he cried, even before he had recovered
from the shock. I'd like to sec your
New York Tribune.
| The piano drummer from Wilkesbarre
| came into the smoking car smiling broad
"What is it, old man." asked the
| "A1Lc SOOuS ulttu 1IOu Il all tl1Ver. HaC
an addition to your family or got you,
salary raised?"
"Nope," said the piano drummer, af
fecting indifference, nothing special
Only Plymouth has been guaranteed on
account of smallpox
Anything humorous in that?" in
quired the white goods man.
MY mother-in-law lives there.' re-
piled the piano drummer as he took a
flask out of his grip and ''treated."-
Caroline Lockhart in Lippincott's.
| They know how to use f1orid language
out in Idaho. Recently the governor of
Idaho visited the Office of the surveyor
general. The letter, which is now in
the files of the civil service commission
in this city, was sent to the governor
by the staff in the office:
| Dear Governor: When your earthly
course is done and you reach the Dor
ders Of Styx, still bearing aloft the love
torch and the friendly and benefcent
banner, the ancient ferryman will, we
know, receive you with love and rever-
ence and give you safe transit with
JOY and thanksgiving.
"Rhadamanthus will hail you with a
glad Well done!, and escort you to the
rose-embowered gateway of the Fields
| F1vSian