Atlanta semi-weekly journal. (Atlanta, Ga.) 1898-1920, 1902-04-07

served and Current Evils re-
ceived many a sassy Rap.
Sometimes they would put
their Heads together to find out
why it is that the beetle-browed
Public prefers the Dimple Sis
tiers in their renowned Buck
and Wing Dido to something
real upetty-up by Comrade
Maeterlinck.
Several times they had set
tied all outstanding Differences
between Capital and Labor, but
they forgot to send Word to the
interested Parties.
One Day they all took hold
of a long Rope and pulled Rud-
yard Kipling down from his
Pedestal. The only Thing that
saved Kipling was that he did
not hear anything about it.
But when they rallied around
the Home Topics, that was
where they lived. When it
came to setting down Rules for
depressing the natural-born In
stincts of the Little Folks, they
were Fine and Fancy.
Occasionally they took up
Man and picked him to Pieces.
One Week they proved that he
was absolutely No Good, and
at the next Roundup they dis
cussed Ways and Means of
keeping him at Home. A Girl
who had been on. the Bargain
Counter since the Year of the
Big Wind, and no Takers, arose
and wanted to know why, if
Man was such a Bunch of Trou-
bic, they were not willing to get
shut of him. She was hooted
and the Executive Committee
threatened to take her License
away from her if she didn't be-
have.
Myrtle McGraw had a very
hot Paper, tied with Blue Rib
bon, on how to make Home so
attractive that the Meal Ticket
would not care to go chasing
out every Evening. Myrt had
just escaped from a School for
Girls, and she had lot of beau
tiful Theories that were simply
waiting to be frost-bitten. She
allowed that if a Wife would
put tissue-paper Shades on all
the Lamps and surround the
Old Boy with plenty of Sofa
Pillows and permit him to
Smoke and then fit to the Piano
and do a grooming Love Song,
he would be so Charmed with
his own Fireside that it would
never occur to him to put on his
Things and go Down Town for
a little while. Myrt had it all
figured out with herself. She
was for a CHEEKY Home with an
$50 Angora on the Prayer Rug
and a glowing Bed of Goals in
the Crate.
A reformed School Teacher
who belonged to the Club took
a different Tack. She never
had been married, but she knew
how to manage a Man because
she had worked the whole thing
out by Algebra. She said that
the boss Scheme for anchoring
the Wage-Earner was to supply
him with an Atmosphere of
Culture right at home. Then
he wouldn't have to go ont to a
Saloon in order to find it. She
advised each Wife to back the
Provider into a Corner at 1880
P. NJ. and read Ralph Waldo
Emerson to him. Later on, by
way of Recreation, they could
take a couple of Leaves out of
the Dining-Room Table and
play Authors. A Husband who
was kept busy trying to guess
the most celebrated Works of
Nathaniel Hawthorne would
never banker for a Stag Party
at the Club or a Social Session
at the Lodge Room.
Another Lady who had been
doing a Monologue for 40 odd
Years put up a Theory that
Home Life lost all Attraction
for Married Men because of the
horrible Evaporation of Loves
Young Dream. She said that
the Honeymoon ought to be
made a Continuous Perform
ance. Even those who had
been married for Twenty Years
ought to sit around on one an
other, talking Baby Talk and
trading Conversation Hearts.
Then there arose a stern Wo-
man who had been to the Mill
and got the Grist. She carried
a line of Black Goods in Stock
because she never knew at what
Minute she would need them.
Four times had she looked the
Preacher straight in the Eye