The Savannah morning news. (Savannah, Ga.) 1900-current, 1902-11-23

Il see tn fut-ball saison is over. y
said Mr.. Dooley. Yale has met Har-
ward wanst again on that there his
toric field where thin cillybrated SINH
naries iv larnin' has so often pasted
each other an tn sthrain is at an
end. Firm now on, they'll be room
FIR tn ordinary cases iv assault-with-
intint-to-kfl in tn pa-apers.
Its become a gr'reat instichoochion
this here game iv t-ball. Whin l was
a Young man a colledge was a place
where tn boy iv tn family was stint
that had tn worst eyes. On'y tn frail,
fair-haired la-ad with a hectic flush
on his cheeks liver get chanst at rale
larnin'. 'Alphonso.' says his parent
SIS poorly. He niver will do much at
tn active pursoots iv life. He's not
sturdy enough to lay brick an If he
.ieft his glasses at home, annywan cud
steal his money. Lave us sind him to
colledge an have him tucked full iv
Greek an Thrignomethry, an whin he
comes out, maybe he can add little
something to what we give him be
writin' pothry' In thin days, tn
prisidints iv TIL colleges whin they
wanted to blow about what they give
FIR III money they got, announced that
they cud take a boy fresh firm his
mothers arms an pipe him so full Nv
Homer that hardly annyWan cud I'M
dherstand half what he said without
the aid iv ditchnry. But nowadays
Near-sighted Willis an Hectic Hal
stays at home an tn la-ad picked out
FIR tn higher life is Bill. Nature in
tinded Bill FIR tn higher life. At siv-
inteen he weighs two hundred an tin
pounds. He has a head like a walnut
on top iv a bag iv flour an when he
needs exercise he goes out an pushes
sthreet car off tn thrack. He con-
varges so much to'rd tn top that they
wasn't room to put in a complete set
iv think devices. but what he has is
well-proticted be a roof iv chilled steel
covered with Vulcanized rubber. TIL
small but injanyOus masheen concealed
in this cupoly is called be Bill his
brain an is used entirely to control
tn action iv his legs an arms. Whin
called upon FIR other purposes, 1t be-
gins to ache. In other days on'y death
wud have kept Bill firm bein' butch
er. AS it is tn family don't hardly
know what to do with him. He's too
sthrong to be licked an too big to be
coaxed an they are SERIOUSLY think
in iV rentin him out FIR a sign boord,
whin wan day a letther comes firm
tn prisidint iv a colledge: Dear Sir
an Madam: l understand that we
have in ye'er family a large piece iv
raw beef that wud make a good cinter
rush. / STRONGLY advise We to sind him
to our far-famed university. TIL col
ledge man is becomin' more an more
a facthor iv American life. Five iv our
grajates is superintendent iv packin'
houses, eight is prize fighters, thirty
two is professional sthrong men an
wan thousan' eighty-four has dedicated
their lives to teachin' the young idee
how to MAIN. In other wurruds, they
ar-re professional fut-ball coaches. TIL
entrance examinations is suited to tn
needs iv tn day. but is reasonably
sthrict on weight an measurement. TIL
coorse is what is called ilictiv. A stu
dent can choose between fut-ball, base
ball, rowin' an boxin'. We offer this
year an unusually good coorse in may
hem undher tn charge iv tn cilly-
brated professor Billy tn Bite. TIL Jun
Undergraduates ar-re constantly undher
tn watchful eyes iv tn mos renown-
ed experts in tn full-nelson, tn ham
mer lock, tn sthrangle holt, gougin.
bitin' an buttin' with tn head. We
attimpt as far as possible to give thin
mild ricreations ra-alizin' that all
wurruk an no play makes Jack a slob,
an in pursuance Nv this thought, we
hav an avenin' coorse iv arson in
which tn colledge buildin's an adm
In private property is used. Far be it
firm me to suggest anything that Wud