Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1902-11-20
CURING A
MEDICINE EATER
BY CHARLES N. HARGER.
100 YOU'RE the new clerk from
y the city, be ye?"

y the city, be YEP"
/ looked around from my desk
quickly to see whence came the sharp
nasal tones. | saw-but unlike Caesar,
| was conquered The object that met
my gaze was a tall, ungainly female
form, clad in bright green gingham
dress, with other ''fiXings" in harmony
with it both as to style and hue. She
was watching me closely with a pair
of piercingly sharp eyes that fairly
made my own quail.
well young man, don't set there
an gawp at me in that way. BE you
the new clerk from back east or amt
you? Can't you answer a civil ques-
tion?"
well, ma'am," said /, feeling that
Unjust say something, 81 am just from
the east and am Mr.. Blake's new clerk,
if that's what you want"
"Wa-al, I'm Melissy Higgs. / live
out here on Turkey creek" she went
on. "We've got little claim out
there an are tryin' to improve it. But
] amt well. Why, you wouldn't be-
lieve all the trouble I've been to since
/ come to Kansas. It's jest awful, as
I've told Higgs lots of times; there
amt nothin' / amt had. Eve been
ailin' considerable the most of my nat
ural life. Once back in lpjiany / had
dyspepsy and then the liver com
plant an consumption (gallopin' con-
sumption, mind YOU an | can't re-
member when l amt had the pneu-
mony. Oh, it's a caution, the things
I've gone through.
Really, ma'am," said |, doubtfully,
81 don't see how can help you. / am
an entire stranger and"
"Wa-al, s'posin' ye be-" she broke
in. "Ain't you druggist? Amt you
Jest from the city where they know
lots of things that these people out
here on the prairies don't dream of?''
81 am a druggist, that is certain;
but | do not see how can be of any
particular service to you on that ac-
count"
"Ill tell We. Ye see just heerd Of"
A longer and lankier specimen of
humanity Gf such thing were pos
sible) than the specimen addressing
me opened the door and entered the
store. He was a typical gray" from
away back. In spite of his appearance
there was something about his twink
ling eyes and good-natured face that
made one suspect that he was less
fool than he looked. took him to be
Melissy's husband, and his first words
proved me correct in my surmise. lie
was evidently much put out about
something.
Miss Higg.," said he. interrupting
my voluble visitor. sis them your do
in's?" He held before her bill from
the rival drugstore, which showed a
sum total of S37.s9. for medicine pur-
Schased in the past three months.
"Berdin just give me that" he went
on. what in the world could you have
got with all that money!"
well, let me see: There was Bust
eds Balm, 10 bottles-for my sore arm
you know"
Yes. | know. YOU sprained it lit
tie. when you was trying that new
tangled healthlift."
And then there was six bottles of
Perdy's Purifier, and six of his Pearl
Pills. l got them cheaper because |
took an even dozen"
You did? How much do they usu-
ally cost. then? Berdin has charged
me a dollar box"
"The thief" she exclaimed. He
told me | should have them for 10 dol
lars. III go right now and see about
it," and she fiounced toward the door.
Her husband called after her, but
she would not hear him. and went on
10 make the faithless Berdin misera-
bile.
When she had gone, Mr.. Higgs be-
came confidential.
"She is the ornariest woman ever
did see" he muttered, with despair
laden sigh. ''You don't know what a
cross she is to me. She's a good wife
and mother, but her bills for patent
medicine nearly swamp me every year.
You've just seen one of 'em. Every
new medicine that comes out she buys.
We've got bottles enough up to the
farm TO more'n stock this here store
of yours. She's just heard of new
kind of electric bitters that have been
invented. and don't doubt she'll want
TO order some"
''Yes,'' / responded. 'She was talk
ing to me when you came in as though
she was interested in my coming from
the city"
That's il. She wants 10 know if
you've heard of this new stuff. Say,
let's fool her. Pretend to. give her
some. and wen expose he IN see if
it won't have an effect 10 rd curin'
her of her foolishness."
/ agreed, and we We're g discuss
ing the details when n Higgs re-
turned. She looked al US ther quee:
ly when she entered
you men folks get acquainted
mighty quick" she remarked.
l suppose Higgs and looked guilty,
but she ratified on without stopping:
Il fixed that all right with Berdin
The price was put up by mistake. lie
gave me two extra boxes of pills to
make it even,