Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1902-07-23

~~
VAN OUT A HUNTING,
l have been studying for long spell
on what in the world Van SAINT is 90
ing to do for an issue to use in the
coming campaign, but have been un-
able to see where he is going to get it.
| think the best he can do will be to
put an advertisement in the papers,
something like this:
Wanted-An issue that can be used
by the republican candidate for gov
ernor in the coming campaign. Must
be one on which the governor, the
republican press and the party bosses
have not differed in the past and on
which they can come to q full agree
ment now. 1t must also be one that
the governor can understand, so he
don It make himself ridiculous in try
ing to handle it. Anything relating
to therailrOad question or the manage
ment of state institutions is barred.
[ don't think any fairminded man
will accuse Van of neglecting to
search for an issue. He has worked
faithfully at that job ever since he
got into the place. First he got that
there board of control idea, and he
| hammered away at it as if he had dis
covered the true secret of solving all
troubles in managing state institu-
tions. Well, it went through, and
Van felt as tickled as young man
who has just got the first kiss from
his first sweetheart. I amt saying
the law wasn't as good as the adver-
tisement stated, but Van bungled fear
fully when it came to pick out the men
who were to handle this new automo-
bile of his. They just got in and
turned it loose, and it created an aw-
full havoc in the departments. Some
of the most influential republican
editors in the state have been
throwing brickbats at the board of
control in the most vicious manner,
and it is a safe bet that Van SAINT
won't talk very loud about that
masterpiece OF his making. So one of
his sky rockets fiZZled out.
he was almost in despair, and it
looked as if he would have to go to
the rear and squat down, when the
merger came. With a whoop he drew
his tomahawk and started out to
bring in the scalp of Jim Hill. If he
could only have that scalp dangling
at his belt when he went out cam
paigning he knew he would be the
whole show himself, and the people
would just tumble over each other in
their eagerness to vote for him. I'm
forum ately, he made his speech and
executed his jubilee dance before he
went into the fight. People thought he
had the whole thing planned out and
held their breath in their eager desire
to see him execute the scalping move
ment. Jim still wears his hair and is
doing business at the old stand. No.
body knows what become of Vans
tomahawk, and he is very busy keep
ing quiet about 1t and trying to for
get about the sad failure. And now
some of the republican editors are
mean enough to insinuate that the
whole thing was farce, and that the
merger is mighty good thing. Here
is the way the Pioneer press puts it:
GAS matter of fact the merger, So
called, is only a part of arrangements
of vast extent to pour the commerce of
the world through these Northern
channels. So far from being a bad
thing for the state, it is the best
thing that ever happened to it's bust
ness and agricultural interests. So
that it is hardly worth while to make
his claptrap about the merger pro-
minent issue of the campaign
And thus another issue busted.
Then there was the tax reform.
Van was advised to pull that affair
off in good shape, but he failed. The
republican party confessed by their
action in providing for the tax CON-
mission that tax reform was badly
needed, But when they come together
in the extra session they seemed to
realize that they were not fit to do
anything so important, and after stay
ing long enough to draw about all the
salary they dared to, they went home.
Van cannot mention tax reform after
that without asking the people to send
to the legislature men who are not
hindered by the great respect for COR
porate privileges that are such pro-
minent characteristic of republican
Legislatures.
He can't mention the dog tax, for
the people who had to kill their poor
bow-wows to escape the burden of
taxation have a grudge against him
for signing that bill, aud the sheep
owners will knife him for signing the
bill that repealed that tax.
His method of handling princes NAV
find favor with those who believe that
lack of polite manners is a sign of a
democratic spirit, but then there are
many who believe that q governor
should act like a gentleman even when
speaking to prince. Poor Van!
JnddINNY CRICKETTs.