Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1902-05-30


the springs ran pure mud; how the
horses, tied 20 the racks, grew wild
and broke their halters and ran pell-
nell, with -unearthly neighs; how the
two pet bears that fakirs had on the
court green ran up the darkies stand
ing around and climed the trees, baw-
ling for dear life, how Col Mays in
nocent little grandson said, "CoL let's
get out of these damned earthquakes.
But 10 the report OF these experts
not knowing the exact cause they
seemed, like physicians in diagnosing a
case, To reach the cause Of the distur-
bance by the process OF elimination aud
exclusion.
One thing they all agree on, and that
is that the disturbance lies Immediately.
under, or about, Angels Rest, which
they are going to report as a peak, TO-.
600 feet above tide-water
They begin by saying that some
scientists claim that this peak is GER
tainly where Rip Van Wrinkle wander
ed to and slept so long after meeting
up with the queer man and the keg,
and the queerer parsonage playing at
nine-pins, and as proof OF the similar
ity they quote, this passage from
Irving: cas- they assembled, Rip. every
now and then, heard long rolling peals,
like distant thunder, that seemed 10
issue ont OF the deep ravinc or rather
cleft between lofty rocks, toward
which their rugged path conducted"
But the report disposes OF this sugges-
ton in summary manner by saying.
that Washington Irving saw people
who saw these hobgoblins; that the
place was on the Kaatskill mountains.
up the Hudson river, and that as this
mountain and river are in the State
of New York, they cannot therefore
be in Virginia.
Another theory is, that the
which finally culni.
mated in the disasters in Martinique.
had tendency to come this way. But
these scientists dispose Of this theory
in this fashion, that Martinique is not
directly antipodal 10 Angels Rest. and
that the rebound or kicking" from
there was not on such "a direct line as
for this reason To effect Angels Rest:
and, also, that as it is so much hotter
in Martinique than at Angels Rest.
therefore, fire must be closer tn the
surface in the former place.
They say that Chaucy Dupew who
is Interested in the syndicate) suggest
ed TO them before they left that he had
gone to mythology TO hunt a cause
and had come 10 the conclusion that
Sisyphus had been required to do extra !
labor by rolling a stone Of increas-
ed weight to the top OF the hill in the
Internal regions, to roll back again, and
assigned as his reasons that as no
Democrats died in Virginia, especially
i'm Giles, that old Sisyphus had again
entrapped Death and fed him up until
he had gotten too fat To work. Butt
these scientists disposed Of this theory
in this way; that Tyler Frazier was
born in Giles, and that the devil would
not abide near amy man who could pray
such an eloquent prayer as he did at
the assembling OF the old confederntes
in Tazewell u few years ago; and fur
Their las majority Of the committee
seem to be Democrats) that hell could
not possibly be located near as beauti.
full country as Giles.
They related that the eminent divine
DIR. Parkhurst had asserted that these
disturbances were sent as punishment
to the South; that when I.ucifer WAS
hurled from heaven To hell. that as
Angels Rest was so high, Lucifer. in
tumbling through the immensitv Of
space, had, by the attraction OF gray
ltation, first struck Angels Rest. and
had set up his lodgings Whereabouts.
But this theory was promptly rejected
as false by the scientists, who said they
neither smeh nor saw any traces of
birthstone there and that they found
OH the cap rock Of the peak, in Hebrew.
the name engraven, angels Rest" and
not "Fallen Angel" as the divine
claimed would be found.
Finally, this is the theory they all
agreed upon and report: They first
found the following facts; that New
river had its source i'm the Appalachian
mountains. running Northwardly to its
confluence. through the spurs of this
great range, and at right angles with
the stratification of the rocks; that the
stfatlfied rocks dip NorthwardIy and
converge from the earth against the
current or the river. that thera - a