Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1902-12-30
USELESS
JIM 7"
BY William ]. Hampton
Copyright. 1909. by the
S. s. Mcclure Company

uiiu Unity paIeuts, uul LIE WIS no eA'
emplar Of the doctrine of heredity. As
q boy he had gone to school, because
If he had not gone there the truant off.
Ger would have made existence else
where uncomfortable for him, and Jim
dearly loved to be comfortable. AT
school it was easier to remain at the
foot of his class than higher up, so he
philosophically chose the easy thing
and stuck to 1t. Jim was not a mis-
chievous boy or bad one In any sense,
because those attributes require effort
to maintain them. AS somebody has.
were those who were disconnected
there, the teacher accepted Jim as n
special providence and made the mos.
of him.
ITS beyond me about Jimmie" his
mother was wont to say. ''He amt a
you'd think when he went to school
he'd learn his lessons just because he
didn't want to learn nothin' else. but
he won't learn single thing. good or
bad. He just seems to be everlasting
do-less = settin' around and settin'
around and settin' around. And I'm
sure he don't get it from the Anderson
side of the house neither"
Mrs. Doty was an Anderson. and this
conclusion of hers was an unsupported
anlmadversion upon Mr.. Doty because
that worthy man not only made very
comfortable living. but owned a small
farm and had money laid away for a
rainy day.
When jim was old enough to go to
work, his father secured q place for
him to learn the carpenter trade, which
was rather a surprising selection, as
success in that depended upon skill
which did not appear to be one of the
characteristics Of the young apprentice
Il put him at that" Mr.. Doty ex-
planned to an inquiring friend. because
I've seen that boy set on soapbox in
the shade and white fer six hours
hand runnin'. OF course he never whit
ties nothing out OF the wood he uses
up but | kind of thought maybe he
would learn to if put him at carpen-
term"
Time, and not very long time either
proved the speciousness of Mr. Dotys
logic, and Jim was 10 longer seen
about the shop where he had essay ed
to handle the drawknife and the saw.
After this attempt to make skilled
laborer of his son Mr.. Doty thought
possibly there might be an undevelop-
ed instinct for agriculture in the youth,
and Jim was sent TO farm not far
from the village. His usefulness in
that field was manifested within three
days by his return to the parental roof.
What's the matter now?' inquired
his father when Jim walked into the
house at supper time and calmly took
his accustomed place at the table as If
he had not missed meal.
Dunno" replied Jim uneoncernedly.
"Old man Sparks said he reckoned the
mortgage Oh the place was about all
the load it could carry at present, and
he told ne | could go''
Mr.. Doty smiled. He couldn't be very
harsh with his only son, because, while
he did nothing 10 add to the glory and
honor and wealth OF the name Of Doty.
he did as little 10 bring shame or sor-
row upon it. MIR. Doty recognized in
jim a negative blessing, and many IA
theirs would be only too glad if they
had such sons
by the time Jim had reached his
twenty-fifth year he had tried his hand
at every kind of work the village and
vicinity had to offer, and he had ac-
CURED nothing except the title of Use
less Jim" But Jim did not worry. He
was philosopher. and his good nature
was imperturbabIe.
"Why the dickens don't you go to
work. JIM" said Hanks. the grocery
man, one day as Jim sat on a salt bar
rel in the shade chipping away at the
chine with his knife
Got job you'd like TO give me:s re-
sponded Jim in willing tone, and the
groceryman disappeared. He might be
anxious enough to see Jim have Job.
but he did not care to assume the reIa.
tionship Of employer
As nothing else Of permanent char
acter offered Itself. Jim concluded. en-
tirely on bis own voIition, to fall In
love. They say an idle brain is the
devils workshop. aud surely be found
a fine place for his business In Jim.
Why Jim ever fell in love nobody could
say. and he did not know himself, nor
did he think it worth the effort to dis
cover. 1t WAS enough for him that he
was in love, and he was serious about
1t. too-so serious. indeed, that he
wanted TO marry the object Of his
choice forthwith. thereby displaying
wholly unsupported energy.
This object was Mary Candy. the
daughter ana-also the vii
lage schoolteacher. She was pretty
and bright. and she liked Jim because.
although disinclined to bodily exertion.
he was noi slow Of wit and he could
talk well.
'For goodness sakes. Jimmie said
his mOther-she called him Jimmie. as
If he were still bow whatever do
you want to marry fors You can't sup
port yourself. much less a wife and
family. and married women can't
schoolteacli to support their hus-
bands.
Il dunno. rs0ther,' replied Jim. whit
Ting a stick down to a fine point.
We'll. yoh ought to know. she said,
letting her temper show Itself Yen
just can't marry. that's all. You're The
uselessest thing on earth now. aud
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