The professional world. (Columbia, Mo.) 1901-192?, 1902-07-18

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Just listen ter the miners
Pourin. forth their owes.
It's a shame. diggin' black sinners,
Not a soul that lives but knows
Gall unto NORWOOD is their lot
Poor though they be.
Oh, j. Ping-pong Morgan,
Now the time has come, yer see.
Give unto them for daily toll,
More pay, have you forgot
OF deeds of desperation years ago?
Riot, wreck an ruin, blood did flow.
Gain thou a name for human kind,
An not leave Christ's teachings all he
hind,
Nor with thy greed be cursed.
The combine NV capital an the
combine NV labor are havin' a 20-round
contest in the coal regions what bids
fair ter make 'em both look groggy be-
fore the referee decides it, said Uncle
Bill, as he laid the paper down and
continued: "These strikes are goin'
to continue from time ter time until la
Dor an capital git closer together, by a
force wv circumstances, somthin' like
the Commune in Paris. They got so
close together then that the rich didn't
cut much ice fur awhile, cause it was
too hot fur them ter do much in that
line. Jest bout that time.
1T looks at times as though capital
lists might prevent these outbreaks by
~conceding a few points to labor, espe-
cially when it is so easy for them ter
even up by fixing the price of the prod
ucts, so that they would not be any los
er in the long run" remarked the edi-
tor.
Yes" replied Uncle Bill, "but people
like j. Ping-pong Morgan are so busy
buyin' $500, 600 curtains fur King Ed
ward that they can't concede ter the
labor element a few cents a day; but
some Nv these days labor will be hold
in a full hand Nv clubs fur them fell
lers' and then they will discover that
their royal flush is a bob tall | was
talkin' ter a large employer Nv labor,
the other day as | was watchin' a lot
of men workin' on some construction
work, an asked him what he thought
would happen if there would ever come
a time when there would be enforced
idleness all along the line, with our
millions Nv laborers, an he said that
the capitalists an government would
have ter keep EN- ter work or the devil
would be ter pay, with no cash on hand
ter satisfy the claim. An he's right.
If j. Ping-pong Morgan, who controls
all the coal mines, iron mines an mills,
a good share Nv the railways an other
concerns, imagines that he can corner
labor, some day he'll go up in the all
an it wouldn't be towards heaven that
he'll be goin', either; an the best thing
fur him ter do is ter sort NV prepare a
parachute ter light with when the time
comes, or he may git a jolt that money
won't fix"
Il see that they burned him in eff
gy,' said the editor.
That shows the feeling that exists
at the present time, an all that capital
needs ter do is ter heed the warnin' an
treat with the labor end Nv the people
with a little consideration. But labor
is havin' a struggle ter git a few cents
more a day. j. Ping-pong Morgan is
busy buyin' presents that cost half 6
million dollars fur King Edward, OIL
hobnobbin' with the emperor of Ger
many. Millions fur luXuries fur thu
kings NV other nations and not a cen
fur the poor miners is a dangerous pre-
cedent ter establish jest at this time
Nv peace IN plenty. There amt much
use, though, ter talk; but if j. Ping
pong Morgan had been born in som
miners family, instead NV a bankers
family, he would in all probability be
lollin' at the sharp end Nv a pick now
instead NV playin' with the dull ends u,
different empires Nv the earth an 4;
buyin' NV 'em presents" said Uncle
Bill as he threw one leg ocross the
other SO hard that his joints made
cracking sound.
He no doubt has some scheme which
he will spring on them for a combine
remarked the editor.
81 'spose he has" assented Unclt
Bill. Il notice that he has been a-giv'
in churches big donations, organ,
an SIGH like-an' | presume that he''
got a scheme on hand ter form a com
bine on salvation. He's after then
streets what's paved with gold, but In
thinkin' that he'll have a hard tim'
gittin' the combination on the locks uV
the pearly gates; an if they amt al
ready ajar fur him, he'll give 'em AZ
awful hard jolt. Still, 'cordin' ter the
Scriptures, he an the camel is goin' tel
have a mighty tight squeeze, an HI
might some day be burned glad tel
change places with the poor miners
who amt askln' much here below, only
a chance ter git Twin wages by thu
sweat NV their own brows, while j
Ping-pong Morgan is a-gittin' his by
the sweat Nv other peoples. But they
say time rights all wrongs, an if i
does, mebby the poor miners ii gi
theirs, from the coal combine"