The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1902-06-01
FUN OF THE WORLD.


characteristic story told of ABE Gruber the we'll
known New York lawyer When he was a boy looking
for something TO do he the sign: Boy Wanted >
hanging outside OF a York. He picked up
ne sign and entered the store. The proprietor met
What did bring sign in here forg- asked the
You won't need it any more" said Gruber. cheer
fully. I'm going 10 the job
MT w Pett Ridge tells in the English that
the best repartee he was in the gal
lery Of theatre An extremely stout good-empered
woman contrved wedge herself into a space tia.
Wuid nave accommodated person ordinary size
the uheonceaied annoyance OF smartiy youth
next to her She began TO peel an orange ana the
youth with gesture of complaint. removed his silk
hat tussly TO a safer position Il suppose said the
goodterpered woman that you'd rather have gentle
sitting by the side you sir wouldn't you7s- The
youth replied snappishly affirmative .Ah.' said
the woman thoughtfUlly so would /
gentleman visiting a co5las pa, minister was
asked 10 attend Sunday hosts church and
address few remarks 70 the children He took the
familiar theme of children who Knocked Elijah on
his journey Bethel-how the youngsters tainted the
POOR old prophet how they were punished when two
she bears OF the and ate forty-and-tvvo
Of them.
And children said the speaker. wishing to
learn if his talk had produced moral effect what
Goes this STORY show
Please sir came from little girl wen down in
front 1T shows how many children she bears can
ZEE re
Colonel Nate Salisbury partner Of Buffalo BIZ in the
Wild West Show. dinner party the other night
and related some amusing incidents the shows tour
IN Europe. Major John NJ. Burke the famous advance
agent OF the entertainment also present AZ the
dinner and Colonel Salisbury told jokes at the
majors expense.
Why do you know" said Colonel Salisbury. Dwhen
we arrived at Madrid the first thing We saw was
gigantic Christopher Columbus To nv sur
prise Burke went taking hat knet before
the statue"
What you doing there. John7" asked
Paying my respects the great original American
advance agent replied Burke.
great series of revival meetings in a West Phia-
delphia Methodist church marked by many con-
versions thanks 10 the eioquence various preach
ers who ofoiated In the beginning one OF them had
taken the question sinfuness Of Strengthening
the innocent birds for the Of millinery dec IA
ton, and had caused something Of a among
the women. y stirring meeting final one OF the
SERIES and one jealous sister related following ex-
perience:
that time I wore feathers in nv hat The, are
no longer there Why? Because brothers and sisters
found that those feathers dragging my soul down
-down-to hell So took them out and gave them to
my sister"
sz zga
This talk Of the fellows who want to do something
for Cuba. but who opposed reciprocity reminds
me of the man who passing a saloon in Water
street New York said Senator Depew. he went
by the door tuanbling out eyes blackened
nose bleeding and face generally smashed
standing the fellow shouting with laughter.
the matter? the pedestrian Why said the other
a man came up to while in there nit me
a terrible n the nose and said Take that YOU
blasted Norwegian What's funny about THAR oh.
wait till tell you Then he another crack in
the mouth, knocked me down andslOosened half my
teeth and said. Take that too you blasted Norwegian
I nothing funny about insisted other man.
'Ha! ha. hai shouted the battered The joke is
that I'm a Swede"
&c lee
An interesting story told OF King Edward VII IN
the Peoples Friend that His Majesty
while staying the OF certain country mansion
visited the village school Unexpectedly began
the children few questions. Now. young friends.
said King Edward cheerfuiy Il dare say some Of YOU
can tell me the Of few greatest kings
and queens. eh? With accord they cried King
Alfred and Queen Victoria. then a tiny slip Of
boy, whom the schoolmaster had whispered some
thing. stood up and raised his hand. you know
another boy2" asked the King. Yes Your Majesty
King Edward. VII" His Majesty laughed and again
asked, What great act has King Edward VII done
oray2" The boy lowered his and stammercd out
7 don't know Your Majesty Don't be distressed
ny lad" said the King smiling. u don't know either
<
That Camden y. J.. is wideawake s the Of
he world shown by incident which occurred few
lays in that town. The
Madam have called for the suit Of clothes to be
-ressed brushed"
What suite"
your husbands s.:eday suit He called At the shop
Town this morning
And he said to let you have it
Did he appear in good health and spiritsg"
Why. certainly"
and look and naturally"
OF course: but WHY DO SOU ask
Because my husband has dead for twelve years
nd had some curiosity on the subject"
Perhaps I've made a mistake
Perhaps yor have. The you gclag out OF
ere this morning IS my brother. Good morning"
And the left
Where American Girls Are Ua'y.