Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1902-04-12
ECHOES OF A FLAT.

"No," said Mrs stretcherino to her CUES
as she returned from hasty visit to tn
fiat dumb waiter, Il can't just natural
abide folks that are always laying stres
upon little bits Of Things, but, mercy on us
how that young Dopinch couple in the ga
above manage TO get along and keep thei
health on an exclusive diet Of pork chop
is more than ! can understand, deed it Is
! do honestly believe tbat tsscy have porl
chops every day in the week for breakfast
and dinner, too, and ! wouldn't be bit SUI
/ prised II she gave the poor thing a col,
pork chop to take along with him to hi
Office for his lunch. ] should think they,
be just afraid Of turning into pork chops
50 ] should Every morning, just as regu
1 larly as cloekwork, the smell Of pork chop
/ comes floating down the dumb waiter shat
from their fiat, and regularly every day
i see the mess Of pork chops for their dinnel
! going up on the waiter. ! guess the pool
little snip OF a thing is too er-well, borr
1 tired, we'll say, TO be charitable, to cool
/ anything for her husband that takes littl,
/ trouble@far be it from me to even hint thai
she's iazy-l wouldn't even dream OF such 4
thing, deed ! wouldn't But she certainly
does get herself up in sloucby way when
she goes out, and, do you know, / really
think she blackens her shoes with stove
polish | wouldn't have you breathe it for
worlds that / mentioned i'll And she pre-.
tends to come from such swell family out
vest She was down here yesterday after.
noon, and / do declare she talked about
her family, and the great things she was
used to before her marriage, for solid
hour, until thought should 80 distracted
deed | did. ! pretended to believe it all, OF
course-one living in a fiat has to be civil,
You know-but ] nope she doesn't think Pm
50 simple as TO have swallowed such non
sense, when, as a matter of fact, it's my
private opinion that her father was brick
layer, from the way she talks about ms big
building operations
"S-sh-ssh! Do you hear that elinking Of
glasses coming from the fat on the other
side Of the court? Well, that's what Pm
compelled to listen to morning, noon and
night, and how that Mrs. Muchswig man
ages to consume 50 much beer as she does
and be in any sort of coalition to receive
her husband when he comes home is be-
yond me, deed i isl Goodness gracious
sakes alive, the beer boxes are going mp to
her fiat in a regular stream all the time.
and it's no wonder that she has so much
trouble with her husband
Il hear em quarreIing dreadfully every
night. He drinks like fish himself. they
say, and yet he objects to her following suit,
and the way they do talk to each other,
mercy on usi And then she has these Dutch
luneheons, as they call EN-, every few days,
and invites lot of her women friends
bold-looking creatures, | should call EN-
and the high jnks they do have all the
afternoon But it's none OF my business.
and if she doesn't choose to invite me to
her paltry little luncheens what do care?
I'm sure that I'm not bothered-and vet |
was just as good to her when she first
moved into her flat as could be. and we
used to make Welsh rarebits together of
afternoons, and all that, but she got angry
just because she heard me call down the
dumb waiter shaft What, another case of
beeri one day when the beer man was de-
livering case to her. OF course. she ana
her husband go out together all the time
and they pretend that there rs never a cross
word between them, but | know better
I've heard them.
Its wonder we're not having some mu-
sic, if that Topnote girl in the flat right
alongside this one calls It music 1t a re-
lief, sure enough not to hear the poor
thing, who thinks She has a contralto
voice, and who is having it cultivated by
teacher who ought to be ashamed to take
the money, asquawkmg even for few
minutes. She's at it all the time. and il
she didnt begin the other morning little
after eight o'clock, hope | may neverl II
she'd only sing something, or even try to
sing something, that had some sort OF tune
to it, it wouldn't be so maddeuing, but she
bowls nothing but exercises all the time,
and it gets on ones nerves 80, you can't ia
aginel You mustn't even breathe that |
complained about her screeching though,
for the poor deluded thing runs in here
often, and as l don't want to hurt her feel
ings | have TO pretend that just love to
hear her practice, and l always ask her to
sing something for me when she comes in,
just to make her think that she's getting
on, you know-but it's an awful experience,
deed it is! My husband pretends to be-
lieve that she mas fine voice and that she
is liable to make a name for herself, but he
doesn't know one note from another, and Of
course he doesn't know what he's talking
about The very idea of his telling me that
she has a voice like cello, and all such
humbug! The very idea
was the door opened III Jne nat DeloW
by a black-eyed creature who thinks she's
pretty when you came up: Because she
generally opens her door towel, there's
no other word for it but rubber-every time
she hears a bell ring in any part OF the fiat.
OF all the inqustive women she is GER
tainly the very worst. ! think she would
Just expire in her tracks il she couldn't find
ont everything about everybody's business
in the building, and it makes me so indig-
uant when ! come upstairs to see her poke
her head out that way, deed it does. We
don't speak any more, because she heard
me say down the dumb waiter one morning
that it was mighty queer my milk didn't
get stolen only along toward the time when
the government people have their pay day
her husband a clerk, you know, and he
the only clerk down beneath here, and sup
pose sle took it to herself, but | don t mind
bit. | didn't like to have her running
in here, anyhow, Haunting her fine clothes,
and deed where she gets them is mys-
terry 70 me, and her husband only an 81 800
clerk She gets herself up regardless, and