The Savannah morning news. (Savannah, Ga.) 1900-current, 1902-10-26
MR.. DOOLEY ON EDUCATION.
BY F. P. dunno.
Copyright, 1907 by Rob Russell.

Its a tur-rble thing to be tn prisi-
dint iv a college," said Mr.. Dooley. "Ye
have to be so intelligent"
Who's in throuble now?" asked Mr..
Hennessy.
me frind, tn president iv Harvard"
said Mr.. Dooley. He's very sad. L
thought tn wurruld was goin' on splin-
didly. Firm day to day tn weather
has been pretty good. barrin' occasion
al rain. TIL coal sthrike is over an
Wen all have plinity Nv coal this win
ter if tn Waterman don't look out. TIL
people ar-round me ar-re pretty good
folks whin they don't crowd. They're
as happy as they desarve to be an as
good to each other as they ought to
be. 1 amt discontinued with tn wur-
ruld an 1 amt sad an ! think ivry-
thing will come out all right in tn end
or nearly right or wrong or some way.
But not so with me frind tn prisi-
dint Nv Harvard. Where you an me.
Hinnissy, with our little slx-an'-three
eighths intelligence sees nawthin' but
good enough. tn prisidint iv Harvard
beholds a blue a n'mournful situation.
TIL wurruld is on tn blink. Things
amt comm out right. We're all goin'
TO tn divvle an no wan to hinder. It's
a bad, wicked, card-playin', novel-read-
in, booze-consumin', wife beatin',
odyous wurruld. An what's tn raison
f'r It? Idaycation! Iddycation. be hiv-
ems. TIL common schools has put ivry-
thing to tn bad.
fx1S OF al
day an IL made me feel as diseased as
If I'd been readin' a book iv family
medicine. I am obliged, he says. to
inform ye,' he says, that tn good we
EXPECTED firm poplar iddycation hasn't
come off, he says. Il will proceed,
he says. TO tn unwelcome but agree
able task iv tellin we about it, he
says.
I'm tn first place, FIR more thin
two gin'rations we have been sthrug-
glin' with tn barbrous II jolly vice Nv
dhrunkennes, which nobody can deny,
which nobody can deny. l exploited
all along that a knowledge iv logger
ply an compound numbers wud f'river
rid tn wurruld iv this curse that has
come upon us lately an that was I'M
known in tn Plymouth gin ration
daughter.) But not at all. TIL fact
that a man can bound Zambesi an dig
up tn square root iV ten don't seem to
have subJooed tn horrid cravin' fr tn
fightin' mixtures. Thousands iv men
who have declined a verb have niver
declined a bowl. TIL amount iv liquor
that is ivry year pushed into tn few
IRISH head iV persons who know about
fractions an tn use Nv "shall' an
will is enough to dhrive an iddycator
to dhrink.
g" 1 leap to another cause iv tn
dumps. Galmblin'. Gamblin' is a new
vice. l niver heerd iv it befure / whit
to Harvard. But such a holt has 1t
took on this poor land Nv ours through
tn assistance iv poplar iddycation,
that to-day in ivry hamlet tn click Nv
tn poker check is tn response to tn
clang Nv tn school bell. Little boys
dart firm tn blackboard to tn horrid
chalked circle in tn schoolyard where
they play mibs f'r keeps while their
mothers gamble at cribbage FIR penny
pint an their fathers set UP all
night thryin' to fill th'epusted flush
But in vain. "
now pass to novels, which make
me mos depressed. had hoped in tn
halycon days Nv me youth that whin
we had piped our people full iv qua
dhratic equations they wud read on'y
tn best books, e. g., Gloom" be
Charles w. Eliot; Despair" by c. w.
Eliot, an Eliot on Wasted opporchu-