The people's journal. (Pickens, S.C.) 1891-1903, 1902-12-04
|TAYLOR'S 0 --=@
HS'$ rouTesp waTSeps meSs moGagh baGpe and al
ullen and Honey Your Druggist sells S%eet snd Ga% s9
IN a HUMOROUS VEIN.

Ao io'oS nor Tor oil he
worth, doesn't he?
Boll-4cs, and for all she is worth
hobblns-l didn't think you had an
ldea OF marrying the widow.
Ncwlywed--I didn't; it was an ide,
Of hers. " ''N '"''
Old Gcntloman-I can't SEQ wbor,
That pair Of spcctacles is worth SI2
Oplician--Of course YOU can't ~,
dear sir. Otherwise you wouldn'I
need them.
Jaggsby-I understand, sir, that
you SAID | drank like fish.
WaSSsby--lCs Il lie. | never kn,w
you to take drink of water in your
life. " ''"'
Phrenologist-This large bump in.
dlcatos that you urc eccentric.
The Victim-Wrony professor. If
indicates that my wife is strenuous
foungpop-I tell you, old bow, it
takes baby to brighten up home.
| Oldwcd-That's right. When there's
baby in the house the gas meter
works overtime.
"Iittlc boy" said tho parson, {"
nope you don't read those horrid dime
| novels"
Not me-" replied the wise young
ster. 81 know where to get better
ones for Nickel"
Little Bcssic-What's a widower2
Little IIarry-Why, wldowcr is a
widows husband. | should think anv.
body ought to know that.
"I wish," said an anxious mother
TO her lndolcnt son, "that you would
give little attention to your lessons -
Why, mamma," replied the little
fellow, 81 do give them as little a..
tcntlon as | possibly can"
Well, there is one consolation
about being up in an airship," ro-
marked tho man who was taking his
first ride through the clounds.
What is that2" asked the inventor.
There is no danger OF being run
over by an automobile"
a young man in Philadclpl ia was
ccently called upon to mourn the loss
OF his wife. 1t appears that at the last
moment he was Informed that The ar
rangcments were such that he would
have to ride to the grave in n carriage
with his mothcr-in-!%w.
Onc-half of the world,n | saw to
my wise friend, "docsn't know how
the other half lives"
Thcn," concludes my wise friend
with an ar dellbcration, cone. half
tho world hasn't any ncighbors."
"A horse ran away with my broth
CT, and he hasn't boon out of doors
for three weeks"
"Thacs nothing; my bother ran
away with horse, and he h.,all / b.cn
out of doors for three years."
"What possessed you," asked Nag
gus, the literary editor, "to write a
'Romancc of Society in tho Other
| World ?"
"Nobody can call me down on it,"
responded Borus, the struggling author.
Whenever | write romance of
society in this world lot of smart
Alecka always tells me l don't know
anything about it,"
"Sailors are awful forgctful, amt
they?" asked little Elsie.
"Why, what makes you think
Because every time they leave o
place they have to weigh their anchor.
If they weren't forgetful they'd re-
member the weight"
IIc inquired if there was no Other
alternative. The undertaken informed
him that IT could not possibly be avoid
cd. Well," said the young man,
"I will have to submit, but it will rob
the occasion of all pleasure for me-"
A Germantown school teacher re-
Gently told one Of his boy pupils, who
was lnsubordinate, that he must be-
have.
elf you do not do BETTER" said tn,
teacher, "I shall 60 and see your faith
cr."
lluh," SAID the boy, who was on),
three feet high, eyer will have to TAX
pick and shovel to sec him. Ho'
dead"
Mary Branyard--Out here we Away
go to bed with the chickens.
Miss Wopsie-Mercy mel it must b
awfully unhealthy.
"Women are hard to understand.
"Think SOP"
Yes; l told hor che carried her 90
well, and she was offended.n
"You don't sayl"
eyes; and then I told her 81
> didn't carry it we'll, and she wouldn
speak,"
T One evening at supper little Lest
/ SAID TO his grandmother:
t Grandma, do your glasses nal
things look bigger 3'
= Yes, dearie," said grandm
t "Why?"
3 Ohl" said Lester, 81 only thoug
n If they did, may be you'd take 'em {
g when you're cutting the cake.'
CA S i I OR 1 q