Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1902-09-13

Slightly Discourteous.-"Y 1 always
do my thinking when ! walk" ITS a
pity you gave it up" Gave up whatT
'''Walking '-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Judge-Still, Miss Sharpsonaat de
clares she has a good ear for music
Fudge-SO has a mule; but he don t use
his ears when he brays.- baltimore
Herald.
Pedestrian-Ca | get through the
gate, my man:
Countryman-I daresay YOU could.
saw a load of hay go through this morn
ing.-Moonshine.
DIDN'T WANT CRACKERS.
There once was young lady DR..
who owned a bad parrot that mr..
lie would likewise blaspheme,
Using language eXtreme-
All of which, so the lady SAID shf.
w. ]. Price In Smart SET.
Interviewer-lIow do you account for
your love of muSicE
Drum Major-Well, when me father
was young he was a furniture remover,
and wan day pianny fell on him.-Tit-
Bits.
A Pessimistic Ooutlook.-"Cheer up
advised the optimist. 1T is nine weeks
yet before winter
"TIuhv' answered the pessimist. ct $
only about four weeks to fall houseclean-
ing"-Baitimor American.
A JUNGLE LIMERICK.
That wicked old heather god l{immnn
Was sour as a young green perslmmon;
For his priest upon Moloch's
Shrine slaughtered q whole OK
And only gave him half a slim one.
Princeton Tiger.
A-That woman who just went out is
the partner of your joys and sorrows, /
suppose!
B--Sle's partner to my joys all right.
hut when il comes TO my SORROWS she
Slips over to see her mother.-Tit-Bits.
Marriage Would Cure Him.-Mr.
Gumpps-That hoy will never be good
for anything until he marries. Mrs
Gumpps-i suppose not. Mr. Gumpps-
No. He's got to get over the habit Of
hanging around the house.-New York
Weekly.
Alligator steak
Eu catfish stew.
jug chOck full
or Mountain Dew.
Lean COW Killed
Fer de barbecue
High oil times in Georgy,
Atlanta Constitution.
$50 Jack deliberately kissed you last
night" commented Miss Antique severe
". Well. Ia just like to see any man
try TO kiss me"
'Why not select near-sighted man
and wear a veil naiyely suggested the
sweet young thing Baltimore Herald.
"O'm DESCENDED from Brian Boru,
ma 'am, Old hoy We know" declared the
naughty Mrs. Fitz Clancy.
rs that all indadeY' replied Mrs
Casey, the humble lady Of the corner
fruit stand; faith, Dim a DESCENDANT Of
Eve, the first apple woman, '-Philade-
phia Press.
Visitor Well. Tommy, how are you
getting on ut SCHOOL,
Tommy tagged Sl-First rate. | amt
doing as well as some of the other boys,
though | can stand ON my head. but
have TO put my feet against the wall,
| want to do it without being near the
wall at ALL
A popular Methodist minister preached
IN MoutClair, y, j., last sunday, and his
sermon occupied fifty minutes. At the
close. q minister who was in the pulpit
with him announced hymu appropriate
to the preachers theme, but with these
words: Il am sure you will all he glad
10 sing this last hymn"
Can you refer me to some of your
former employees" asked the lady of the
girl who had applied for a position.
II cud. num- replied the girl. but
faith | wont, fer il Oi did yez wouldn't
hire me an what yez don't know won't
hurt ye2, at all At ALL Columbus( o.
state journal.
4 Study in ContrastS.-"Don't You
know that your office boy is very ag-
gressive aud overbcaring persona" "Ncs,"
said the business man. Its not Il bad
idea. No matter how hurried or annoyed
may be, Impress a caller rs good-na-
tured, compared TO the office boy
Washington Star,
Courtesy Due-"Why in the world is
Brakeman laughing SO uproariously N
that old story Cashum told him Just now -?
I've heard Brokemau tell il himself a
dozen times, years and years ago"
Probably You have, but Brakeman Just
borrowed i've from Cashum e 'iucin.
natl Commercial Tribune.
.