New-York tribune., 1902-12-28
A DINNER AT HAGNEVS'S.


crank II he were chimpanzee at the Zoo
CT some equally valuable exotic animal he
could not be more fanciful over dietetical mat
tiers When he hears of a new form Of break
fast oats he is not happy till he tries it. nor,
when he has tried it, is he happy till he has
tried all his friends with the story Of its indi-
gestibility-
His real disease is two thousand a year and
nothing to do He has made a hobby Of his
stomach. and his hobby has made him 4 frank.
whole souled and perfect bore.
L was sitting over the fire the other evening
waiting for dinner and rereading Trilby'
when Van Amberg, who inhabits the rooms be-
low mine, came in and told me TO rise up and
follow him. as he had discovered a positively
miraculous cafe, and wanted TO take me there
TO dine. To escape a cold leg of mutton Nh5ch
had haunted ne for two evenings and whicn
knew my landlady WAS that moment lay
ing" only that it might appear before He IN
the more frightful form of a hash / took
my hat and followed Van Amberg-
L will give you a dinner such sou have
never eaten before said he as we Got into a
hanson. You know the state of my health
and that 1 only live sufferance, SO 20 speak
sugar without any metaphor, is death 10 ne.
and / love it. 1 have sometimes thought Of
going into Fuller's and ending my w7etchei
existence in one wild debauch always take
ing Buszard's for the place has an attraction
for me which / can only Hken to the attraction
Of a precipice / can't eat veal; l can't cat
pork: i can't eat anything want 10 eat
sometimes pass the Carlton with pocket full
of soveTeigns; but / no more dare go IN there
and dine than the who sweeps the cross
ing Just below: but at this new place-ilas-
neFs's-I can eat anything. He is the wizard
OF the kitchen. You wait and see
We dismissed the cab at the oXIord-st eld
Of Wardour-st- We walked down Wardour-st-
through Old Compton-st and down alley;
at the door of 4 dismal looking third -ci'sss
restaurant he stopped. This is Hagnevs's
Surely" I said you not going to dine
in place Of this description
Without replying he entered and ] followed.
Tie place was arranged inside in the old
l--s1sioned English Tnanner-lcoss boxes With
table in each. Van Amberg chose TIE loX
nearest the door which vacant and UP
came NJ IIagnevs in person to inquire what
he could do for US, He was tall man with
long black hair and piercing black eyes; an
ideal brieand man of energy, TOO for III
less than no tine dinner was served
All. what dinner that was, from the lobster
red crawfsh soup 10 the pale green curious
tasting ice What a dream
"A very great yiolinist is dining here to-
night" said M. Iagnevs, as he served US Wlth
coffee himself no less 4 PERSON tlei4i A-~-1
You will hear him play heard a fiddle
being tuned and then from a back room OF
that disreputable restaurant came music. 1hh!
that was music indeed; music to live for music
almost to die for
When it ceased my friend arose YEARLY and
placing the amount Of the bill on the taDe'
turned toward the door Come" he SAID let
US go"
Well / said. when We were IN 1he aAeS'
II rnust compliment you on your discovery
Van Arnberg laughed. What have you hao
for dinner?" he asked enumerated the courses
and he laughed again Then he salo; hou
won't be angry Il tell you something!
Perhaps not-go on"
NeI that dinner all a fake; all those
wonderful courses were simply dry bread and
cold water Do you think 1 could have eaten
those things? 1 ate them in my imagination
vVbila NV body ate bread nagnevs Is a hyp-
potist. his guests are hypnotized- AT ms place
one can eat and drink anything and ENJOY IL
xy,-bou+ harm to ones sef-the fat man can
-ax,ai in sugar the man with indigestion can
eat nork Is not that the greatest discovery
OF the age?"
But he did not hypnotic me; he did not
touch me"
do the Indian fakirs touch the cToWos theS
hvrnotize the crowds that watch them cilmb-
ing ladders that hang with no support In Inc
air and stabbing children in wicker baskets!
But the violin player?
.Ob ta is an old fellow Ilagnevs gets IN lot