davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1902-09-27
The Incredulous Policeman.

His majesty the king had an
amusing experience while driving in
his motor car in Norfolk not long
ago. He was stopped by a very
young policeman, who informed the
driver that he was going too fast.
The latter was rather indignant.
Don't you know who I'm driving?"
he said. cts the king" "Get along
with your nonsense" replied the po-
iceman. "That's the fourth king
who's passed me this morning." The
incredulous guardian of the peace
thereupon insisted on riding short
distance on the box to see that his
injunctions were obeyed. His face
grew bluer and bluer as the short
distance was protracted into a long
distance, and that into a longer one
still, till at last he found himself
landed at Sandringham. - London
Globe.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1902-09-27

of greasy paste through all the colors
of rainbow and all the perfumes of
a flower garden, that British sci
enlist most aptly termed the car tar
industry a chemical romance"
Ordinarily ton of coal burns away
in your furnace OR kitchen stove, and
all you probably think of at the time
is that the $3.50 or 81 you paid for the
coal is gone. But if the expense of
getting the products had not been too
great, here approximately is what
that ton of coal contained:
Coke, 34.12 bushels; gas, ready for
commercial use, 10, 1873 cubic feet; 1880
to 11.5o gallons gas tar; ITO pounds
aniline; 1.2 pounds aurin; 2.44 pounds
solvent naphtha; "a pounds heavy
naphtha; $50 pounds napthalense; II
pounds creosote; 14pounds of so-called
heavy oil;" 46 pounds anthracine, and
69.6 pounds of pitch.
And the value of all this product?
Well, about 1900. The creosote alone
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1902-09-27
FOREIGN GOSSIP.

Some people are born poor, some
achieve poverty and some thrust pow
erty upon other people.--Chicage
Daily News.
We 60 not care how good looking
woman is, when she gets jealous LOOK
in her eyes she is positively disfigured
|-Atchison Globe.
A Observation-Disclosures de razor pull
boss?" asked the barber. NO." re-
piled the man in the chair. "The razor
only catches and you do the pulling
Chicago Post.
Madge-"Dolly's got a divorce"
Ress.-''On what grounds" Madge-
"1ncompatibility. Jacks hair doesn't
match her new dress"
Tiger.
ooh, woman" he cried, "you are az
cold as ice, and" She turned upon
him with a sudden frown. las
dear" Her features relaxed again
Kansas City Independent.
"This," said the peddler, sis little
device especially designed for use in
our summer weather" "What is it 2"
inquired the curious man. ''It may be
used one minute as a fan and the next
minute to shovel off the snow."-Phil-
adelphia Press.
Tramp Tin the country)-"1es, /
once rode a bicycle, but had ter give
it up" Cyclist-"Why?" Tramp
"Well, yer see, the owner wuz comm
down the road behind me, and the po-
liceman had rope stretched across
the road in front"-Chums.
Quite So.-"After all, there's moth
ing like real estate to make stead
fast citizen of the most wayward OF
men. When a man owns land he is an
chored, so to speak" Harry-"But
what's to prevent him from selling,
and resuming his waywardness"
Uncle George-"What is to prevent his
selling? I see that you have had no
experience in real estate transactions.
It is always easy to buy, my boy, but
when you want to sell-well, that's
another proposition. Boston Tran
script,
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1902-09-27
Oriental Logic.

A man bought three pounds OF
meat and brought it home to his
wife to cook for dinner, and then
went his way to his place of bust.
ness in the bazaars. The wife was
hungry and ate the meat.
In the evening the man came home
and asked for his dinner.
"There is no meat" said the wife,
'tfor the cat ate It."
Bring the cat" said the man, land
q pair of scales"
"Weigh the cat" said the man.
The cat weighed three pounds.
IF this is the cat" said the man,
"where is the meat? And if this il
the meat, where II the cat?"-Har.
per's Magazine
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1902-09-27
THE. GRASShOPPER.

I know poet who all day long
singeth amid the clover
"A joyous singer whose simple song
Delighteth many lover
And maketh all the daisied mead
gladstone, blessed place indeed.
His are no proud aerial flights
Enskied mid glowing splendors;
In nameless hooks, mid lowly lights
There he his song surrenders,
humble minstrel, quaint and coy,
Mingling his note in Summers Joy.
When Morning dawneth glorifed,
This laureate of the meadow
Ere yet the lark hath far-espied
The glowing Of the shadow
Hath voiced paean in her praise
And gone upon his happy ways.
And when at eve-tide from his glade
The linnet flutes a measure,
Silly, he lists the serenade
And folds his wings in pleasure:
For his own Elf-haunted dell
This Grasshopper Is Philomel
But when the mid-noon's browsing bean
Makes every songster weary
And silent in golden dream
tireless voice and CHEEKY
Is heard within swarded bower,
soft-tinkling through the rapturous
IT'S his! the humble grasshopper's,
Beloved of many lover,
The voice that, gently shrilling, stirs
To ecsracy the clover,
And makes the daisy-starred mead
A gladstone. blessed place indeed!
Alexander Cargill. in Pail Mall Maya.
zine.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1902-09-27

veys in Russia have shown that it far
surpasses its neighbors, having coal
area of 10000 to 10000 square miles.
But even Russia is poor compared with
| the 214,225 square miles of rich coal
land in our country.
And every square mile of this coal
area full of vanilla perfume, aniline
| dyes and antiphyrine! Think of the
| number of ice cream sodas that could
be favored, the millions of yards OF
flannel to be colored and the billions
coal tar riches contained therein!
All of which goes to show that hero
is vast opportunity for enterprising
Americans to invest education, brains
and capital for the development of I'M
told riches.
Perhaps a brief statement of the
process of manufacture may be per-
mitted. In the first place the coal is
placed in huge air-tight containers aud
subjected to comparatively moderate
heat. As the air cannot getIat it, the
coal will not burn, but will give of
gas, each ton the 10000 feet men
toned above, and while the coke re-
mains there will drop out of it large
amount of semi-solid Smeary liquid
the coal tar. This ill-smelling STUFF
soon separates into two layers, the
lighter oils remaining on top. Now.
ordinarily, these lighter oils are SIM
ply passed of, perhaps the creosote
is extracted from this and the heavier
liquid is used as pitch. But when all
the virtues of both the light and the
heavy oils are to be utilized much
more careful process is followed. The
oils are first separated as far as pos
sible by being drawn of, and then
each part is heated very gradually to
a higher and higher temperatures 4
Thermometer which is held in the
steam showing the exact temperature
at every moment. Thus the SUBJ
stances that are most volatile, that il
those that change from liquid to gas
eous at lowest temperature, first be-
come gaseous. They pass over through
pipes into the coolers, which are gen.
orally at some distance from the build
ing in which the heating process is
carried on. As soon as the gases reach
q cool lpace they of course change
back to liquid form. By this accurate
but simple method the first light oils,
mostly water with ammonia, known as
ammoniacal liquor, are distilled over
at 100 degrees Celsius, or 2o2 degrees
Fahrenheit. Then the temperature il
raised and the next set of gaseous,
the so-called second light oils, are OBJ
tanned: Third comes the creosote,
fourth the green oil; and then, at 425
degrees Celsius, that is 800 degrees
Fahrenheit, the black oils change from
liquid to gas and pass over into their
condenser, leaving only the pure pitch.
Each separate set of oils is then SUBJ
tected to many different chemical re-
agents, and it is principally by wash
ing out with ammonia and acids that
the last distilled products, the black
oils go through SO many changes and
brings out the mysterious virtues in
perfume, color and saccharine.
e. 7. GUNDLACH.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1902-09-27
coal land in the world, should be far
III B. I, B. Tv M

coal land in the world, should be fal
behind Europe in this respect. In fact
about the only by-products extensively
obtained from coal in America are gas,
creosote for preserving lumber. and
some carbolic acid. All the other
wealth of chemicals is either burned
away with the coal or allowed to re
main in the pitch used on roofing or in
pavements.
1t is only within the last four or five
years that American manufacturers
have awakened to their great opportu-
nifty for making money out OF coal tar.
Yes, the proposition was even adj
vanced that asphalt pavement should
be subjected to some special heating
process to extract it's mysterious by
products. The scheme was actually
tried two or three years ago some
where in Pennsylvania, but was aban-
doned. Shortly afterward a large
manufacturer of pitch in Philadelphia
decided to utilize the full virtue of his
manufacture and the aniline dyes.
and even drugs and synthetic oils Of
delicate perfume, are now being pro"
duced. In Chicago, with its enormous
coal, gas and tar Industries, there il
but one firm that carries this industry
beyond the making of pitch for pave
ments. This firm draws out the creo-
sote and sells it to lumber dealers.
The other by-products are distilled
over in the rough and shipped off to
Philadelphia, where renewed process
of distillation mentioned above is I'M
dertaken. There are also some other dis
tillers in the eastern cities, and few
large factories, but the great major
ity of these make only certain prod
ucts, particularly creosote and car
bolic acid, shipping away the residue
to the next factory, which extracts an
other compound or set of compounds.
Now consider comparative figures
for the coal industry in the United
States and in Europe. At present the
output annually in the United States
is about 160,O0O,0O0 tons of coal per
annum as against about IT'S, 000,0 900 for
the British empire, all British posses
sions included, and less than half this
amount for Germany. The coal area
of Great Britain is II, 1859 square miles,
quite a respectable surface compared
with the 1000 square miles each of
Prussia and of France. Recent sur
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1902-09-27
THE OLD PLANTATION BELL.
Relic of Southern Days Before the
War Located in q Northern
Junk ShOD

"Old bells always interest me-" re-
marked man who had lounged into
a junk shop to see if he couldn't find
the old brass candle-sticks his wife
was always talking about, relates the
Detroit Free Press. "Where did that
old farm-bell come from?"
The junk-dealer smiled little, and
said: ''That old farm-bell has quite
history. It was brought from way
down south, after the civil war, by a
colored man, Old Jack, everybody
calls him. He cuts grass around town,
saws wood and does other odd jobs.
The old bell, he says, was on the
plantation to which he belonged with
IS other slaves, and when the family
broke up his old master asked him
what he would like to have as keep
sake from the old home. He chose
the farm-bell-it is hard iron, you
see, and has d good, old-fashioned
country ring to it.
'Old Jack says he brought the bell
up north all the way in push-cart,
with his other traps, but I don't know
about that. At any rate, for many
years he has lent the plantation bell
to little back-street church in which
he was prime mover. The little
church hadn't any steeple, but Old
Jack rugged the bell up on frame
behind the church, and rang it faith
fully on Sunday, twice day, and on
weekdays when they had meetings.
He wouldn't trust anybody else to
ring that bell. No, sir, he thought too
much of it for that.
"Well, the other day he brought it
here on his push-cart and asked me to
buy it for one dollar. He said his
churchfolk had built q new church,
with a big steeple, and, had got SO
stylish that they didn't want the old
bell any more, they made fun of it,
and said it didn't sound like church
bell, anyway, it sounded like an old
wayback tavern dinner bell. Old Jack
wept at parting with it, but he said
it made him feel badly to look at it
now, and he hoped it would be sold off
into the country, where it could ring
on farm again. 1 gave him the dol
lar-and quarter for luck-and prom
ised him wouldn't sell it except to
farmer. You don't know one who
needs bell, do your"
''I1l take Old Jacks BELL" said the
listener; we've got small place in
the country, and my wife will be tic
killed. to death to have real oldtime
plantation bell to ring at dinner time"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1902-09-27
COAL TAR PRODUCTS.
Thew Enter Irto All Phases of Mod
eru Business Life.
Used In the Manufacture of Cosnet-
les and Perfumery as Well a.
the Making of Fine Dyes
and Drugs.
Especial Chicago Letter.

| wv les, our 1Tleuu Ath1uS,
| the chemist, rejoined. "Coal
tar did it,
Atkins was more of a scientist than
a humorist. He adjusted his spectacles
and looked critically at the young
woman who had won our admiration.
'Her complexion does credit to coal
tar" Atkins continued, "her blonde
hair is frightened with coal tar, her
ruby lips are dyed with it, and should
not wonder if her teeth had been
cleaned with the same stuff. 1t seems
that she has perfumed her dress with
coal tar, and, as for the gaudy ribbons,
the snow white laces, the patent leather
shoes, the beauty ensemble-coal tar
did it all. Do you see that box of bon
bons she's carrying? Well, it's more
than probable that few drops of tar
oil remnant gave them their alluring
sweetness"
What Atkins had said was all strictly
scientific. The number and variety of
products from the tar oil industry is
simply Supplying. Fifty-four totally
different products, with characters
tics varying as widely as pitch, carbolic
acid and mirbane perfume, are made
and marketed. One hundred and fifty
different industries obtain part of
their raw ma terial from one or the 9th.
er of these products. The most
delicate tints, the gaudiest dyes, the
finest perfumes, and that sweetest of
sweet things, % degrees sweeter than
sugar, the compound saccharine, be-
sides certain powerful medicines are
secured by careful distillation of
the pitchy, smeary, foul smelling stuff
that remains when coal is converted
into coke. So simple and yet SO COM
plex is the continuous metamorphosis
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1902-09-27
In Installments.

Mrs. Gay-But told you to itemize
the bill.
The Milliner-The bill I sent to you
on the LIST was itemized; every item
was there.
Gracious! You don't understand
me. l want you to send only one item
each month or my husband will never
pay it."-Philadelphia Press.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1902-09-27
Ray of Hope.

Employer-Mrs. Slack, would you
like to have an increase in salary?
Employe-Would l? I should say !
would.
'Well, let me tell you, then, that
unless you get here earlier and work
great deal harder, you'll never get
it in this world.-Tit-Bits.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1902-09-27
Do Not Spite Yourself,

If you are sore and dissatisfied, re-
member the man who quit his job in
a huff, and offered to come back
within three months for one-half the
money formerly paid him.-Atchison
Globe
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1902-09-27
The Name nj 6:nb.

The island of Cuba was known bv
that name by the Lucanyan Indians.
who were with Columbus when he
discovered it.-Cleveland PLANE Daler.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1902-09-27
An Eye to Business.

lawyer can get you . divorce
without publicity for $3.50.
Actress-How much will it cost with
publicity Flown Topics.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1902-09-27
Jealousy's Other Nan

Jealousy is but another name for
inordinate self-esteem. - Milwaukee
Sentinel
The Aberdeen Democrat. (Aberdeen, South Dakota) 1???-1909, 1902-12-19
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS.
Although Sharp and Cautious the
Wildcat Has Not a Good Mems
Dry for Traps.

Our almost extinct wildcat is q beast
which For want of memory has not
been able to hold its own. While the
fox and the badger, especially the lat.
ter, are adopts at avoiding traps, the
wildcat seems quite unable to keep
out OF them, says the London Spec
tator. Yet the glutton, another car
nivore of the northern forests, with
out any apparent brain endowment of
the positive kind, has learned the
whole art of trapping SO successfully
that it will follow along a whole line OF
40 miles of traps, break into every one
from behind and carry off the bats
without being caught. In the same
way the balloons of Africa, whether
north or south, maintain themselves
in a locality in their full numbers long
after most other creatures of equal
size have disappeared. The part OF
the Matoppo hills in which Mr.. Rhodes
tomb is cut in the rocks,i is deserted
by the Matabeles because, as they are
now disarmed, the balloons carry of
all their corn and pumpkins.
The rat and the rabbit are not very
different in point Of fecundity. But
while the rabbit, except on very favor
able soil, disappears in a cultivated
country like England, where it is not
afforded any protection, the rat is
practically master of the situation, SC
greatly does his power of individual
experience. and probably also of com
munication, exceed that of the other
rodent. 1t can hardly be an accident
that the gray parrot, n of the clever
est and most thoughtful of birds, is by
far the longest-lived.. There is an I'M
doubted instance of this bird surviving
for a century, and half that time is
quite a common age. But in the case
of birds so many other considerations
than those of brain intervene in deter
mining what leads to longevity that
only vague gcneralizations are pos
sible. Size, food and species all have
their known results on the duration
of a birds life. A gannet has been
known to live for 40 years. Spanish i'm
perial eagles to nearly that age, an
Egyptian vulture to AZ, ravens for 20
years and swans for nearly as long
But it is a fairly safe inference that
the life of birds is, in proportion to
their size, longer than that of mann
mails. Comparing the general average
of brain power, that of birds. is much
higher than among the average
beasts; and it is quite probable that
it is this excess Of brain vitality which
gives the birds also an excess in bodily
vitality
The Aberdeen Democrat. (Aberdeen, South Dakota) 1???-1909, 1902-12-19
FRESH AIR FOR cows.
Dairy Animals should Not Ne Kept
Continuously Even in a Well.
Ventilated Barn,

Our forefathers used to- believe in
and practice the "toughening proc
ess" in connection with the manage.
ment Of their milch cows-that is.
they kept cows in loosely boarded
stables, where cracks and seams
yawned and knotholes opened, admit
ting cold, wintry winds, rains and
SHOWS. Then they turned out the
COWS a large part Of the day in
chilly fall winter weather. Exposure.
was the order of the day. Happily,
now we realize the mistakes of such
methods; we know that cows require
reasonable warmth and comfort in
order to do their best at milk pro-
ductlon. Warm, tight COW barns are
now the order of the day, but the
trouble is some of us have inclined
too far in the opposite direction.
Some OF u intelligent dairymen adj
vocate and practice close stabling Of
cows all winter, going to such ex
tremes as never turning their COWS
out of the barn once from fall to
summer.
l cannot refrain from condemning
such an unwarranted procedure as
radically and Numerically opposed
to every dictate of reason and com.
mon sense, as we'll as hostile to all
physiological law. The cow, in COM
mon with all domestic animals, is de-
pendent upon sun and air for life
and health. Vigor and constitution in
dairy herds cannot be maintained.
save by an abundance of pure oxy-
gen laden air being always main
talned for breathing. Inside air, even
under the most perfect ventilating
systems yet attained, is never like
outside air. 1t lacks the tonic, brac-
ing, i%nvigorating qualities of heavens
pure ozone. There is nothing like
the great outdoors. I want to in-
press upon COW owners the vital inn
portance of the open barnyard or the
field. where for an hour or more.
according to the weather, even in the
dead of winter, the cows may obtain
their daily constitutional.
This barnyard should be built in a
protected. sheltered place, where cola
north winds can be excluded, either
by buildings, hedges or high tight
board fences. The exposure of the
barnyard should be such as to admit
a maximum of the rays of the sun
from the south and a minimum Of
cold and wind. Few days there are
when the cows cannot take at least
a short stroll in such a yard, es-
pecially if it be provided with a roof
over it. A little outdoor exercise
will always result in a quickened
blood circulation, great activity in
the digestive and milk %secretory or
gans and increased nervous energy,
so essential to a prime dairy cow.
N. Y. Tribune-Farmer.
The Aberdeen Democrat. (Aberdeen, South Dakota) 1???-1909, 1902-12-19
The Cow for the Dairy.

The principal thing about dairying
is the COW. If more attention were
paid by the dairymen and farmers to
this factor we would have more profit
able herds. 1t hardly pays to keep
cows that produce less than 5000
pounds per year, but the average is less
than 1900 pounds. If a man does not
want to test his milk for a year, he
can at least weigh it for that period.
The cost of feeding and caring for a
small mixer is just as great as the cost
of feeding and caring fora heavy milk
Ell. The profits IRE found only with
the good mixer. The sooner the farm
ers weed out their Improbable cows
the sooner will the bank balances of
farmers show q healthy increase in
size. Cows that are profitable are the
only ones to keep. A sleek COW is sell
dom a profitable dairy animal.-Mid-
land Farm.
The Aberdeen Democrat. (Aberdeen, South Dakota) 1???-1909, 1902-12-19
A PREACHER IN QUEENSLAND.
The strange Reception Of q White
Mindster at the Hands of =
Group of Natives.

In a recent book Edward B. Kennedy
thus describes the welcome given by
black natives of Queensland to a white
preacher who visited them: "A black
fellow came up to me and placing his
hand gently on the bride of my horse,
nodded his head in the direction of my
friend, with That fellow priest 1
agreed; upon which, sinking his voice
to a mysterious and hoarse whisper,
he proceeded: 'Budgery. That fell
low like it put on shirt over trousel,
get a top O. waddy, and yabber bout
debil. debil;' which, rendered in plain
English, reads: Good. That man puts
his shirt on over his trousers, gets
top of wood, or pulpit, and talks
about devil, devil Before I could
make any remark upon this new and
startling manner of describing Q
preacher, the whole mob of blacks:
who had been listening to the infor-
nation vouchsafed me, commenced to
dance about with joy at having a par.
son; and we 500 found out the rea-
son, for my instructor, signing to the
others to be quiet, struck an attitude.
then turned to his reverence with an
air of pride and satisfaction, and thus
addressed him: You give mine Tx
pence mine say lorsprer tin commands
burgery quick all same white fellow
which meant: Give me six-pence, I'll
say the Lords prayer and ten COM
mandments splendidly quick as "a
white man does in church, Then,
without a moments hesitation, he rat.
tied off like lightning, as far as we
could follow him, a page of the church
service, throwing in a few responses
here and there. The parson looked
grave, as the black, the very second
he had concluded, held out his hand
for s%ixpence, and upon the coin being
refused him evidently considered
that he had not spoken his piece fast
enough, for he called up another
member of his tribe, saying as he
pushed him forward: This fellow
cabon quick one shillin'.' This man
very quick, one shilling"