The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1902-08-21
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policemen"
AS they reckon time: How long has
she been on the stakew only about
three divorces. Chicago Record Her
aid.
Some one has named a cigar after
Mary MacLane. 1t emts blue fame
and sulphurOus smoke.-St Paul
Globe.
Nathan Hale is reported to have said:
~ am sorry that l am not cat so
could give nine lives to my country
Harvard LampOon.
"Noodelles never disagrees with any
bodv." Yes; that's what makes 1t SO
disagreeable to have him around.a-
Indianapolis News.
Father-"Well. my son, what did you
learn at school to-dayw Little Proc
tor-"Not to sass Tommy McNuttr'-
Chicago Daily News.
Bragge-I was knocked senseless by
a cricket-ball two years ago." The boy
in the corner-"Wben does yer expeck
ter get over it?'-Tit-Bits.
Truths echo: GOOD men, you know.
are scarce" Yes. l know, and even
bad men have to make themselves SO
at times. Boston Courier.
The optimist: Grandpa-"Well, Hor-
ace, we haven't caught any fish; it's
hard lines" Horace-"But we had good
luck digging worms. Chicago News.
Pugilistic.- Nell-"Did Miss Bilyums
act as if it was severe blow when she
didn't get the prince" Believes,
she took the count Philadelphia
Record
Hardhead-"Well, every man has
right to his opinion" Pepprey-"Yes,
but the trouble is he can't be made to
realize that there may be wrong to
t"-Philadelphia Press.
That author keeps his identity close
ly concealed" YES" answered Miss
Cayenne; until i read his books
thought it was due to modesty." Isn't
itT mo. Discretion. "-Washington
Star.
Far from it: Girl with the Gibson
girl neck-"Fan Billiwink has begun to
show her age. hasn't sheY Girl with
the Julia Marlowe dimple-"I should
say not She's begun to try to hide it,"
Chicago Tribune.
1t was her FIRST ride in an automobile
and she was deeply interested In the
horn that was used to notify people to
clear the way. Papa" she said.
"Well?' he returned. MAKE it snore
some more."-Chicago Post.
Haven't you read that lovely new
novel;" asked the first summer girl.
No. replied the other, 1.-The only edi-
ton of it I've seen has horrid yellow
cover that doesn't accord with any OF
my gowns. "-Philadelphia Press.
SOciable: "Well, WE'LL" remarked |
Farmer Korntop at the Zoo this here
lion pears to be real good-natured."
"Mebbe" suggested his good wife, Its
one O. them social lions We read about |
III the papers. "-Philadelphia Press.
This is remarkable climate" said |
the tourist. 1T is" answered the old |
settler. Ever since have been here
have wondered how a climate could |
change so many times day and every |
Time for the worse. Washington Star.
Upgardson-"I hear there is some
complaint that the continual dampness
is rendering many pianos useless"
Atom-"l have heard of its running
great many pianos, but haven't heard
any complain about it."-Chicago Trib-
une
The superintendent-"No children,
why do we love to go to the beautiful
parks? What do we find there that Is
always fresher and purer than it is in
The city," Truthful Tommy with
cheerful promptness)-"Pop sir!"
Tx.
Yes, count, in all the park there is
no place l like so well as under this
old, old tree" tSighing sentimentallyD
There are tender associations, you
see. AHA. l comprehend. mam'selle.
lOu have yourself planted the treew-
Punch.
can't imagine anything more I'M
satisfactory than meal at our board
ing house." said the chronic kicker
No!' replied the impressionable young
man. Evidently you never got a kiss
from your best girl over the telephone"
Philadelphia Press.
Hes all right: First congressman
lou have voted against every meas
ure that was for the best interests of
Tue nation. What will you say to your
constituents when you get home"