The Savannah morning news., 1902-03-23

atorial aspirations, and it Is possible
that Jack Gardner may succeed john
ny Kean in that body. The Jerseyman
who does this, however, must be ac-
customed to rising before daybreak.
John L. Sheppard and John H. Ste
phens hail from the Lone Star State.
You are yet to hear from them as Jack
Stephens and Jack Sheppard. New
York boasts of three Jacks, and there
are two each in Virginia, Tennessee,
Wisconsin, Ohio and North Carolina,
yet no one ever uses the by-name in
addressing the congressman from these
states. There is one Jack in the House
who answers TO his name at nearly
every roll call. His name is Summers
Melville Jack, and he comes from Indi-
ana, Pa.
The same trouble occurs with the
synonym of William. In the circles of
craftsmanship Bill is an antonym en-
tirely unknown; yet to the House the
Bills outnumber the Jacks by one.
There are thirty-four of them. They
include four in Georgia and four in
Massachusetts. 1t sounds strange to
speak of the Georgians as Bill Adam
son of Carrollton, Bill Howard of Lex
ington, Bill Fleming of Augusta. and
Bill Brantley of Brunswick. 1t sounds
far more strange, however to address
the Bay State representatives as Bill
Lowering of Taunton, Bill Green of
Fall River, Bill Knox of Lawrence,
and Bill Moody of Haverhill, even if
the latter is to become Secretary of
the Navy; but whether you dub him
Bill or arraign him as the Hon. Will
liam, he is as sure to make as good
secretary as ever stood in shoe
leather. He will undoubtedly take his
place on the scroll of fame at the side
of Bill Whitney of New York. The
brightest of the thirty four Bills is un-
doubtedly Bill Hepburn, usually known
as Pete Hepburn of Iowa. He derives
the cognomen Pete from his second
name, Peters. Hepburn's eye has
frightened perceptibly lately over the
improved prospects of the Nicaragua
canal bill in the United States Senate.
He has been the soul of the Nicaragua
project for years, and has never lost
his faith in the willingness of Con-
gress to authorize the project. He has
the blood of Matthew Lyon in his
veins, and all the vigorous American
ism that characterized that great Mile
sian. Another gentleman of fame is
Bill Jones of Warsaw, Va, although
no Jones would probably be more
shocked to hear himself called Bill.
Every congressman in his boyhood
must have been acquainted with Bill
Smith. He was resident of every
state and school district, and was
usually freckle-faced and had warts
on his hands. Well, Bill Smith is to-
day wolverine member of the House.
coming from Grand Rapids. He re-
joices in the chaste computation of
William Alden Smith. and has neither
warty hands nor a freckled face. OF
course, the name Bill has become
pseudonymous. 1t would never do to
call the chairman of the Committee
on Pacific Railroads Bill Smith. The
best known Bill Smith in the annals
of Congress came from the Old Do
minion, and was hailed through the
land as Extra Billy.
Jim is a surname far more popular
in the House thar either Billy or Jack.
There are twenty-four of them, and
they WELD fully as much influence as
the Joes and the Charleys. Indeed,
the leader of the minority is known
throughout the Union as long jim
Richardson of Murfreesboro, Tenn. In
point of ability he has few peers. All
the Jims are rare specimens of manly
beauty 1t would be difficult to match
in physique, face and intellect men like
Jim Slayden of San Antonio, Jim Nc
Andrews of Chicago and Jim Robin
son of Indiana. Then there is Jim
Hay, of Virginia, the chairman of the
Democratic caucus; Jim Kehoe of
Maysville, Jim Mann of Chicago and
Jim Griggs of Dawson, Ga. All are
more or less Websterian in intellect,
and all not only ornamental, but use
full in legislation. Jim Sherman, of
Utica, and Jim Wadsworth, of Gene
SEQ are genuine pillars of state. One
formulates all the appropriations for
the Indians, and the other distributes
the government largess to the farm
ers of the country. Nor should Jim
Needham and Jim McLachlan of Cali
fornia be overlooked They resent all
fruit, and are eternally striving to
drive the Chinese exclusion law
through the House. A statesman more
than acute is slim Jim Williams of
Carmi, ILL.,, and one fully as Sagacious
is Jim White of Kentucky. Then there
are modest Jim Young of Philadelphia,
active Jim Stewart of Paterson, lit
erary Jim Perkins of Rochester, and
versatile Jim Hall of Ridgway, Pa, to
say nothing of Jim Hughes of Hunt
ington, w. Va, and Jim Davidson of
Oshkosh. All make the surname a syn
onym of good fellowship in legislation
and sociability.
Such is nomenclature in Congress. In
the House it includes II Neds, Is Bobs,
6 Dawes, s Sans, 10 Hanks, II Toms
and Stoves. In the Senate it's in
congruities are still more glaring. What
could be more painful than to write
of Hank Lodge of Massa chusetts, Gus
Bacon of Georgia, Bill Frye of Maine.
Steve Mallory of Florida, Jack Morgan
of Alabama, Nate Scott of West Vir-
ginia and Gene Hale of Ellsworth. 1t
makes a common congressman shudder
to think of such a dissertation of pro-
priety. Amos j. Cummings.