The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1902-03-28
SEPARATE PLEASURES.
Sprinkled Among tho Mutual Ones.
They Add to Happne Of
Married Lie.

A woman writes me that she is 80
years old, her husband 80. She finds
life growing !:ttle gray and monot-
onous, as she has much time to do moth
ing.
1t is difficult for ME to imagine such
situation for an intelligent woman in
great city, full Of Interesting and de-
sirable and necessary things to do, but |
must take my correspondent statement
as a fact, and deal with it as such.
She says: "Will I be benefited by
joining womans club? My husband
complains OF my being blue and morbid,
and of taking life too seriously. am
afraid OF getting into a bad rut useless
to myself and my friends. ANY advice
in your valuable column will be duly APP
preciated as to the ho;tt USE to put my
home. My husband does not care to
go out at all, but is willing l should
When a girl of 20 marries a man Of 10
she rarely thinks ten years OF twenty
years in advance.
Men are more attractive at 10, as
rule, thar at an earlier age, but the
average American begins to ''settlc
down. at 50. ard finds his whole happi-
ness at his own ires.la. This is either
because he has worn out all the pleas
lres Of the outside world. or because he
has never learned how to enjoy anything
but work and sleep.
Enjoyment of life's social and artistic
pleasures is rarely gift. but an accom-
plishment, to be learned by practice.
1t is curious psychological fact that
the average American woman Graves so
cial distraction from 80 10 60 far more
than she does in her teens. unless she
has an interesting family OF children or
grandchildren in whom she is absorbed,
or profession of some kind.
I think this is due to the ever unap-
peased love of romance in Woman's ma
ture.
Most men ontlive that sentiment and
are satisfied with the comforts OF life
as they advance into maturity. But a
woman wants things to happen outside
of the commonplace routine Of life.
I advise my correspondent to join a
good woinan's club. by all means.
I never belonged to one, tut l have
often been entertained by them. and
believe these organizations, when not
over(lone. exert Il wholesome. stimulat-
ing and broadening influence ON women
There Is less jealousy among the sex
in large cities than in country towns
less than ever in the history of the world
among women today.
1t is greatly due to the fact that wom-
en- are learning to know one another in
their lives and pursuits through clubs.
| Out of these clubs grow many beau-
tiful, charitable and educational
branches.
My correspondent would no doubt soon
find occupation for her mind and hands
| if she entered one of the many societies of
agreeable women which are organized all
| over the city, and she would be able to
| carry cheer and brightness instead of
| gloom and depression into her husband S
presence.
But she wants to avoid becoming a
club crank and making the society which
she joins of more Importance than her
home or her husband
| Since the Marriage club enrolled her
as member first, let it have her first
[ and most devoted allegiance. and let all
other organizations be subservient to the
home interest.
| l think it an excellent idea for hus.
bands and wives to have some separate
pleasures. with many mutual ones. Each
returns to the other refreshed and with
new ma gnetism and powers of entertain
ment.
| But it Is misfortune when the sep;
arate interest becomes the chief pleas
ure. and the mutual enjoyments sec
ondary in Importance.
| To keep normal. wholesome, sensible
moral and cheerful is necessary III what
ever we undertake in life.
And no one can be absolutely moral
| who is not cheerful.
lie who desponds his Makers judgment
| mocks
The gloomy Christian is a paradox
Ella Wheeler Wilcox in New York Morn
| ing Journal.