davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1902-10-24
THE SPLASHlNG U
A French Yarn That Was Printed to
Ridicule Englishmen.

Ridtcule Englishmen.
One Of the most extraordinary tales
ever Invented about Englishmen by
foreigners was the "splashing house"
story, given to the world by the Paris
journal Patrie in 1868. An ingenious
writer in the paper gravely informed
his readers that in the suburbs of Lon
don were houses where earth beaten
up into mud is retailed." To these
houses men were accustomed to resort
in hunting kit for the purpose of being
splashed with mud.
"These curious establishments are
provided with muds of different coun-
ties, but principally of those counties
where the hunting is best. The sale of
the mud is conducted in the most Sc
riOus manner imaginable; the attend
ant inquiries, From what county, sir,
do you wish it to be supposed you have
just returned? From the county of
Kent The pretended sportsman there
upon takes a seat on q wooden horse
whose legs throw up the selected mud;
after having been well splashed the
customer pays his bill g shillings).
casts an eye of appreciation toward the
mirror, takes a whip in his hand and
goes to exhibit his muddy clothes in
Piccadilly, Bond street or Pail Mall,
in order that it may be supposed that
he has just returned from a grand
hunt"
In addition to the chance Of marry
ing an heiress which this remarkable
display of dirty clothes confers on
their wearer. says the French news
paper man, the patron Of the splash
ing house" has another more imme-
date advantage. 1.-The mud with
which he is splashed affords, if not
proof, strong presumptive evidence
that he is a landed proprietor in the
county whose mud bespatters him."
And landed proprietors being held in
vast esteem as solvent and desirable
creditors, the nan can obtain anything
he likes at any shop on credit.
One wonders whether such q wonder
full tale finds any believers among
those who read it.-London Live Stock
Journal,
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1902-10-24
The Way OF the World.

We met the people going one way
with their arms loaded with beautiful
flowers.
whittier do you drift" we asked.
1--WE 60" they exclaimed, Ito adorn
the graves of our dead heroes"
Later on we met them with their
arms full Of bricks.
And now where?" we asked again.
ITO throw these at our living be-
roes," they again explained, with pity
ing smiles at our dumbnesS.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1902-10-24
A Corner In Eggs.

"That old hen just seems to be burst
ing with pride" remarked the farmers
dog.
Pride? Nothing Of the sort. It's
eggs" replied the Leghorn rooster.
"She thinks she's a financier, and she's
trying to stop laying until there's a
rise III psice."-Exchange.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1902-10-24
Unreasonable.

why did she leave him."
"Oh, he was so unreasonable. She
wanted to frame her divorce DEGREES
and hang them in the library. but he
insisted that they were not artistic
and wouldn't have them there.-Chi-
cago Record-Herald
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1902-10-24
Fatal to His Candidacy.

"You have just as much right and
theoretically just as good a chance as
anybody else to be president" says the
patriotic citizen to his neighbor.
II cannot agree with you" signs the
%neighbor. "We have no children, and
that fact alone would lose me the pho
tographers' vote."-Judge.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1902-10-24
A E-auIty Apprn1Eement.

MI. Spriggins prides himself on un-
Outstanding the value of money"
And that's where Mr.. Spriggins
makes a mistake" said the liberal
man. "He expects u dollar to buy two
or three times as much as it has any
right to and is continually being an
noyed and disappointed
Star.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1902-10-24
Her Opportunity.

"They say she isn't happy" com
mented the neighbor, "but l don't see
why" I.
"Oh, some people ever are salts
fed"
That's right, and it's her own fault
if she isn't happy, because she's able
to buy clothes that will make all the
other women enyious .'-Chicago Post.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1902-10-24
The Small Brother.

II heard him call you 'duckie.'" IN
nounced the small brother.
"Well. what of it," demanded his
sister detantly.
"Oh, nothin' much" answered the
small brother. Il was only thinkin'
maybe it's because of the way you
walk, but it amt very nice Of him.
Chicago Post.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1902-10-24
Folloring Good Preachins.

Vicar Severely. to his cook}-Mary,
you had q soldier 70 supper last night.
Cookies. sir; he's my brother.
Vicar-But You told me you had no
brother.
Cook-So thought. sir. until you
preached last Sunday and told us we
were all brothers and sisters.-London
TIT its.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1902-10-24
itG%i SORES

Slow healing sores are unsightly, pain
full and dangerous. They are q constant
care and source of anxiety and worry.
Chronic, slow healing sores are fire.
quent1y the after effects Of some long
facilitating sickness that leaves the con
stitution weakened and the blood in q
polluted, run down condition, when a
scratch, cut, simple boil or bruise, be-
comes a fearful looking ulcer that grows
and spreads, eating deeper and deeper
into the flesh in spite of everything that
can be done to check it's progress. Old
people whose blood is below the standard
and the circulation sluggish, are often
tormented with face sores, and indolent,
sickly looking ulcers upon the limbs that
give them hardly a moments rest from
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1902-10-24
The Real BOY.

what does Freddy like to playT
asked the caller.
FREDDY" replied papa, likes to play
whatever games his mother and | de-
eide are too rough for him."-Detroit
Free Press.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1902-10-24
Future Vengeance.

Future tv~engeance.
you'll be sorry for this some day!",
howled the sol and heir as his father
released him from the position he had
occupied across the paternal knee.
"Pll be Sorry: When?"
when | get to be a man."
you will take revenge by whipping
your father when you are big and
strong and | am old and feeble, will
you, johnny" Il e..
mo, sir" blubbered Johnny, rubbing
himself. but I'll spank your grand
children till they can't rest!|-New
York Times.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1902-10-24

Half a ton of sawdust contains 100
pounds Of charcoal, $50 pounds of acids.
24S pounds of water and 162 pounds OF
tar.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1902-10-24
Purify the Blood
Heal the Sore.

Is too weak to throw off the germs and
poisons, and no amount of external treat
ment will heal them, but they continue
to grow worse and worse, and many
times terminate in that most horrible of
all human ma1adies, Cancer.
S. S. S. cures slow healing soreslby
purifying and invigorating the germ
laden, vitiated blood aud purging the
system of all corrupt matter, thus strik-
ing at the real cause and removing every
hindrance to a rapid cure, and this is the
only possible way to reach these deeply
rooted, dangerous places. S. S. S.
strengthens and tones up the circulation,
and supplies rich,
~~ nutritious blood for
the rebuilding of the
.>.>.> constitution and
healing the sore,
when you get rid Of
the old plague spot for all time.
If you have a slow healing, stubborn
sore, write us about it, andour Physicians
will advise you without charge.
The Swift Specific Co., Atlanta. Ga.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1902-10-24
AZ the Hnrse shnw

At the Horse Show.
McBrier-Did yez ever see a horse
jump foive feet over a ince?
McSwatt-Oi've seen 'em. jump four
feet over. l didn't know that a horse
had foive- feet!zIndiananolis News.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1902-10-24

pain and worry.
Ordinary sores
are liable to be-
come chronic
when the blood
The St. Louis Republic., 1902-08-09
RECENT COMMENT.
How to Gain the Scientific Spirit.

Philadelphia Saturday Evening
There other class which, rightly read,
to minister than all other reading to
the understanding science. And these the biog-
raphies of the great of science.
when a naturalist undertakes the study of any living
organism he begins will the simplest in which
organism found watches day and night through
growing with its growth in the
by history through which Thus
where enough of the is shown his real
moved him. trace out the actual evolution OF a
scientific and TO know other way, what
the scientific spirit is.
Let take up the study of such a life that of
Pasteur and follow 1t from the yard in Arbois
the Inauguration of the Pasteur Institute
catching somewhat OF the simplicity sincerity
method, he follow this simple
through his school days dreary Inconsistencies
Paris; the gradually forming strength will
which the truth and would make any sacrifice
and perform any labor to attain it, follow him through
those simple but exhaustive experiments in spontaneous
generation: in his life history the Influence
principles OF biological until they
discoveries which have made life something
the whole of men; II will in such
the growth of of the in science, will
realize other way that unselfsh pursuit OF
truth leads only to larger usefulness but less truly
simplicity nobility OF life. after ALL
perhaps study of science which intelligent reader
will yield much. will give him direct view the
philosophy of science and of s bearing human life,
study OF the masters of science themselves.
The St. Louis Republic., 1902-08-09
AND \ WIFE THROWN IN.

Surely the times out of joint and old humanity
is not what it used to be if the advertisement which
Mr.. John H. Griffin recently inserted in a Macon.
Mo-. newspaper does not him to be fairly
showed under with acceptances of the offer therein
made.
Mr.. Griffin wants TO manage his Missouri
farm and live stock. He promises such man Il fair
share Of the profits. pretty and sensible wife. a
splendid wedding feast. home the farm renfree.
He even promises TO pay for the marriage license
and to fee the preacher who performs the ceremony
The young who is willing become the bride
o. tie manager of Mr.. Grfins farm is attractive in
appearance ) feet inches in height with light hair
and blue eyes.
Here is bliss itself awaiting the successful re-
spOpdent TO Mr.. Grifin's advertisement Can you
doubt that thousands will respond-especiay in old
Missouri where a good farm and a pretty wife are
regarded making this esewise vale of tears a veri-
table heaven earth?
Unless the rising generation Of Missourians un-
worthy of their sires Mr. Griffin is by this time in
stale Of siege. army of would-be brdegrooms sur
rounding his habitation and demanding the manage
of his farm and also of that sweet young woman
whom he proposes TO throw in with the farm.
The St. Louis Republic., 1902-08-09
BRITISH LIFE GUARDS, SCANDAL.

An amazing revelation of deteriorating influences
prevalent in the British army is found in the incident
of the recent brutal matreatment of Lieutenant Greg
son of the Second Life Guards of the Kings House
hold Cavalry in garrison at the Windsor barracks.
The offenders in this were men who bore the
Kings commission in the crack regiment of the Brit
ish cavalry service. They Lieutenant Gregsons
fellow-oficers members of Englands ultra-aristo-
cratic CASTE
Because Gregson preferred to devote himself to
arduous study in his profession of arms. refusing
join in the sports and dissipations of his regmenal
set. 1t determined to drive him from the regi.
ment. He set upon by mob of officers of the
Second Life Guards, thrown out of his barracks
quarters, chased around the barracks yards horse.
whipped and ducke in the water trough his per-
sonal belongings destroyed scattered. The vilest
language the part of his prosecutors accompanied
this outrage.
Compared with this English outbreak the oc-
casonal disagreements and jealousies among Ameri-
can army State militia officers, sometimes calling
for official notice, shrink into nsignifcance. 1t is
safe to say that 1isgraceful happening as that
at Windsor is not recorded in the annals of any
The St. Louis Republic., 1902-08-09
REMOVE DUTIES FROM TRUST PRODUCTS.

REMOVE DUTIES FROM TRUST PRODUCTS.
When the Retail Butchers and Meat Dealers Ma
tioDal Convention adopted resolution instructin all
local bodies throughout the United States 10
tain the attitude of Congressional candidates toward
the proposition to remove the tariff duties on meat
and meat products, notable step toward tariff re-
vision was taken.
These tactics constitute effective warfare against
the trusts by those who suffering from the mo-
noToly exactions of the trusts. The great combines
in restraint Of trade must be struck through the
tariff. revision of the tariff be attained only
by eecting Congress the majority of whose MEM
bars in favor of tariff reform. The situation has
reached this definite phase, and the National Retail
Butchers and Meat Dealers Association confronts the
truth il exactly the right spirit of comprehension.
Every voter in this country who is opposed to the
surrender of its trade and industry into the hands
a few hundred monopostic mutimillionaires. enjoy
ing unjust privileges at the sacrifice of the peoples
rights should in the approaching Congressional cleo
tions, make of casting his vote for Congress
scna candidate pledged TO work and vote for tariff
revision. Accept half way promises. Refuse to
be bunkoed by platform of generalties which avoid
n definite pledge. Insist upon it that the Congress
sonal candidate for whom you vote is distinctly un>
der expressed pledge for revision of the tariff.
The National Retail Butchers and Meat Dealers
Association is making a manful. aggressive and
formidable fight against trustism. So far is in the
power of its members throughout the Union no cam
didate will be elected TO Congress this year WHOSE.
vote is controlled by the monopoly trusts. The
ample thus set by the victims of the Beef Trust
should be generally followed by the American people
a body, heavily taxed and overcharged they
are for the enrichment of monoposts. The issue of
the Congressional campaign of 1902 is tariff revision
and especially revision that shall the duties
from all articles controlled by trusts
The St. Louis Republic., 1902-08-09
SIR. Bronausb to HI. Friends.

To the Editor OF the Republic
Clinton. Mo. July 8.-Having been van
auished in what / considered to have been
a Iaudable ambition TO serve the people OF
my State in the capacity of Railroad and
Warehouse Commissioner. / ask the cour-
tesy Of space in your paper to extend my
cordial and heartfelt thanks 10 the stall
wart Democrats who gave me their sup
port in the recent St. Joseph convention
While l fell short of a sufficient number to
give me the nomination, I am very proud OF
the support / received The go votes given
me on the second ballot / think clearly in
dicates my positive strength. which was
there to stay with me. l was and am proud
of it, and think any man who fails to re-
ceive first honorS should be consoled in
knowing that he was backed by such genu-
inc friends from such splendid counties and
such invincible Democratic constituencies
These were from north of the Missouri
River viz: Pike. Galloway. Boone. How
ard. Atchison. De Kalb and Holt counties
and some scattering votes in that section.
On the other side OF the river my support
embraced the Fifteenth Congressional Dis
trict the Sixth and Seventh except Greene
County, and nearly all OF the new Six
teenth. and number of the counties In the
Fourteenth. The Jealous support these del
egates gave to me indicated that they
would have remained in the st. Joseph con-
vention until now and cast their ballots for
me if 1t had been necessary. The support
was all from the counties that may be
termed rural as farmers and stockmen
dominated in numbers all the conventions
that selected them
OF course. expected a fair support from
the big cities. hut out OF the $50 votes IN b.
ST. Louis and Kansas City 1 did not re-
ceive any votes. Being the only representa-
tive of the farming and livestock interests
of the vast section Of the State unrepresent-
cd on the Railroad Board. I was foolish
ru-f~ = ~ .tN,Na Nr1T
Endorsement that / had. even the managers
of city politics would think it was good pol
itics and fair play to be generous towards
me. as the men who supported me had been
towards candidates from the big cites and
especially St Louis. in the past. and would
have helped me to secure one OF the places
on the Railway Board.
W. c. BRONAUGH.
The St. Louis Republic., 1902-08-09

or modify the same. That right was con-
ceded by the Supreme Court expressly, but
said that the Circuit Court has not done
SO. but on the contrary the Judge here
justifes his order. so of course he will not
change il unless compelled to-; and con-
cludes for these reasons the preliminary
rule prohibiting the carrying out OF the or
der of the Circuit Court is made absolute"
1t is truly sung in the nursery rhyme.
learned almost in the cradle. "Oh, what
tangled web we weave. When We practice
to deceive" And how more vicious is that
deceit when willfully aimed TO deceive a
free people and mslign and undermine the
credit of the highest and most honorable
court of great commonwealth. all in the
interests of selfish and unscrupulous
political party or clique.
have written this review to vindicate
before the people Of Missouri, who may not
have the opportunity to read and discrimi-
nate the decision of the court. the honor or
that court ard the righteousness Of It's de-
cision. and to show the animus OF this
mendacious attack.
JOSEPH WHELESS.
The St. Louis Republic., 1902-08-09
AFRAID OF THEMSELVES.

Refore St Louis Republicans, be they Stalwarts
or Half-Breeds, can make the election law an issue
there must be some explanations regarding their
present fight the proposed nominations by a
direct primary.
Republican clubs are busy these evenings passing
resolutions requesting the City Central Committee to
hold delegate convention. One of the clauses in
these resolutions reads follows:
primary by direct the candi-
dates. under which method, according
the law, the City Central Committee
only would have a in the selection of
the Primary Election Boards, would. this
time, be antasonstic TO that harmony and
good feeling which all and unsessh
Republicans desire promote, and would
be solely in the interest of such element OF
the party the said committee represents.
Could there be any greater confession of weakness
by party which claims to have found issue in the
general election law?
There is 10 Republican objection to the primary
law, but candidates afraid the central or
Ganization They do trust their representative
on the Board of Election Commissioners who would
have complete control of the primaries.
If nominations made by primary. they are
afraid thar one faction would manipulate dishonest
judges and clerks of election that ballot boxes would
be stuffed and Indians be used.
This is the party which crticises the so-called
Nesbit lava law which has suffered in reputation
because Republican Committee in the Twelfth Con-
gressional District did not wish to elect its own
nominee There was no criticism of the laws opera
tons outside of the Twelfth District.
Until Republicans able to purify their own
committees they have right make themselves
rle judges Of fair and unfair election laws. They
lost Congressman because of this inherent weak
ness in the party. The present prospects are that
they will lose the coming election because of the
popular dislike, in and out of the Republican ranks
OF the prevailing itch for the spoils of corruption
which has marked the action of the dominant faction
The St. Louis Republic., 1902-08-09

American regiment. The standing of the Second Life
Guards in the British service is such as increase
the wonder Of this recent occurrence. King Edward
himself is CoOnein-Chief of the regiment. Its Of
fcers the very flower of the British nobility and
gentry. Its history is so glorious that regimental
pride alone should have made such an incident i'm
possible
The meaning OF the assault on Lieutenant Gregson
is ominous that it must surely fill the British mind
with dismay. The military establishment Of Great
Britain is in straits if the army ocered in the
majority by men of the quality of those who were
guilty of this assault If 1t is to this point that the
dominance of caste has brought the English commits
stoned line, the the English army is .democ-
ratzed," the better and safer for England
The St. Louis Republic., 1902-08-09
wH1TEwAsH1NG WHILE YOU WAIT.

Governor Yates's Investigation" of the Kankakee
Insane Asylum scandal was so obviously intended to
be whit2wash Of the management of the institution
that .ae Governor of Illinois is placed in more un-
pleasant position than ever before.
According to the news reports of the labors of the
Investigating board, the main object of that re-
markable body to prevent the submission of any
testimony that might prove the truth of the charges
against the asylum administration.
Two witnesses prepared to testify, former
employees Of the asylum, but they had been notified
that II they appeared the asylum grounds they
would be arrested, and the Investigating board did
not summon them extend promise of protection.
representative of the Civil Service League desirous
of assisting in the investigation, was denied admis-
sion to the board meeting until late in the afternoon
when he was told that the board had completed its
labors and adjourned. There are no charges be-
fore u.s." the members Of the investigating" board
reported
This fragrant "whitewash" of the Kankakee
asylum management is in keeping with the spirit
which led Governor Hates TO reward political heeIers
with appointments to asylum positions The result
ing scandal of immoral practices with female inmates
Of the asylum Logical development of such ap-
The St. Louis Republic., 1902-08-09

Missouri voters will not fail to note the signih
cance of the promptness with which Republican or
eans rush 10 the defense of Lee Merwether In the
campaign under way. Any criticism of Meri-
wctber, any nmation of the truth his latest at
tnpt to hoodwnk the voters of this State provokes
instant protest from Republican newspapers The
truth thar Lee Merwether is but tool of Missouri
Iepublicanism was never made plain as in the
present campaign Republican managers and party
o:Eans are doing everything they to bolster up
the Meriwether cause. Unfortunately for themselves
and for Meriwether, they betrayng the truth by
their excessive sOlicitude. They showing Mis-
solri voters that .Merweher is now the foster-chd
of Missouri Republicanism. sucked at the Republic
an breast and drawing his sustenance therefrom
The St. Louis Republic., 1902-08-09

Where, OH where. have the Republican organs put
the looted School Fund issue? Where is the Re
publican politician who repeats his old promise to
pudate the certificates of Indebtedness? Where is the
charge that there is something like sxtysxmillOn-
dollar discrepancy: And, finally, where is the busi-
man who has consented to contribute to the Re
publican campaign fund condition that these
issues should be preached? Perhaps. after all. the
business men have spoken their minds about the silly
tommyrot which the organs exploited, but now
dodge.