The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1902-08-14
Back In Old Tennessee.

Noio Vho yOuuSoSt anu his SeCOHu WIG
was shuddering ON the edge of the
grave. He had sandy complexion,
prominent front teeth and the most
mavelous appetite for the products of
the still. When he arrived in town he
was told that young man of his ac-
quaintunce was going to Texas. He
hunted him up at once.
"Going to Texas, air ye?"
"Yep, going to leave tomorrow.
"Whar abouts?"
"Goin' to Dallas"
"That amt fur from Waxahachie, is
it?"
"Not fur"
"Well, I just wanted to tell you I've
got brother down thar. He lives
somewhere about Waxahachie. They
tell me he's done mighty we'll down
thar. Got a good farm, lots of stock,
money in the bank, and amt married.
| wish to favor me you'd git ON the
train some day soon and go down thar
and tell him just how I'm fixed. 1t
won't cost much and it'll help me. Tell
him I've got those ten or twelve girls
and only two boys and they're twins
and amt wearing breeches yet. Tell
crops has been mighty bad, and my
hogs has all died of the cholery, and
the old woman has been sick and I've
had to sell off my stock to live and if he
ever wants to help any of his pore kin
now's his chance. Tell him to go over
to the bank and have them telegraph
some money. The more the better, be-
cause I'm in mighty tight corner -
"All right, I'll go right down there
as soon as [ get to Texas"
A few hours later they met again.
The renter had spent his time where
the liquor was most plentiful and had
taken on a comfortable package. He
was carrying his chin up and his red
whiskers stuck out straight and his hat
was hanging over his left ear.
81 hear you air goin' to Texas?" he
said.
"Yep, I'm goin' to leave tomorrow.
"Well, l jest wanted to tell you I've
got brother down thar living clost to
a plcace they call Waxahachie. He
left here long time ago and | haven't
heerd from him much. Don't know
just how he's doin'. If you happen to
see him just tell him Tn still livin'
here and doin' we'll. Got no kick COM
in. Tell him I've got twin boys, the
biggest, finest pair OF kids in the coun-
ty. Just tell him I say Texas may be
all right, but it can't touch Tennessee
nowhere. Tell him I'm satisfied and
everything is all right and / hope he's
doin' as well"
"All right, I'll tell him.
Two hours later they met again. The
renter had been paying his devotions to
all the deities of intoxicants and was
rolling like a tank steamer in heavy
gale. He slapped his young friend on
the shoulder with the vigor of Fitz-
simmons and whirled him around like
a pin wheel on the Fourth OF July.
II hear you air goin' to Texas?"
"Yep, goin' tomorrow.
81 just wanted to tell you I've got O
brother down thar. He lives around q
place they call Waxahachie. He has
been down thar long time and I'm
afraid he amt doin' very well. When
you git to Dallas / want you to go down
and see him fur me. I'll pay yore ex
penses because I'm kinder uneasy about
him and / want to know fur myself
Don't let him know that | sent you
When you see him tell him just how
I'm fixed. Tell him there amt bettel
farmer in Tennessee than me. Tel
him I'm ten years younger than | wal
when he left here. Tell him I've got
big family and I'm doin' we'll by 'em
Tell him my oldest girl is studying ar
in France and will wind up in Rome
Tell him the next oldest is taking mus
ic in Boston and has voice like ali an
gel. Tell him another one is taking |
course at Vassar and kin ride bicycle
to beat the band. Tell him I'm oil
right and that I'm the best man in Eas
Tennessee and can lick any man in tn
mountains and gittin' stouter every day
Tell him that can climb thorn tre
a hundred feet high, naked, with wilt
cat under each arm and never gi
scratched. If he wants any money jus
tell him to telegraph my bank for wha
he needs. Tell him to git new suit 0
clothes, out and out, and come and SO
me. Tell him to take sleeper and t
take the drawingroom and come i
: style. | don't want none of my XII
i comm home looKin' like they wa
Q busted.
"All right, I'll tell him."
The next morning as he was maxim
for his train the emigrant found th
renter balanced against telegrap
5 pole. His hat was gone, his shirt VS.
!. in shreds and his necktie was hangin
down his back. One eye was out {
y commission and the other with its Ii
at half mast. His lip was slit and b