davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1902-07-24
How the Chimney Swift. Got It's Name

Occasionally a bird is strong mind.
ed enough to break away from old ira.
ditions. Before this country was set.
tied the swift nested in hollow trees.
but after trees began TO he emf down
anu eliiiilis.ss arose apove the roofs OF
nuicl. 70 nercera ,bo+ .4 sros o. aua were
ally ont nv the time thai, nasting $50 co..
son arrives: therefore, why NOT take
advantage of the innovation? So COM
pletely did they forsake their old nest
ing sites to build in chimneys that the
name chimney swift is now universal
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1902-07-24
THE GREAT JOKE, DEATH.
Funny Side of Dying often Treated
of In LfteratUre.

Funny Side of Dying often Treated
of In Lfterature.
Death" said publisher, has been
treated humorously in our literature
often. Indeed l am quite sure that a
collection of many thick volumes might
be made under the title of Deaths
Funny Side Thomas Hood was one
of our best writer's of this sort of
verse. Don't you remember his ballad
on the young sailor who died heart
broken over his girls unfaith? The
last stanza was:
Ills DEATH which happened in his berth,
AT forty odd befell;
They went and told the sexton, and
The sexton tolled the bell.
"Hood did another ballad on the SUBJ
ject of a soldier who lost both legs in
battle, who was in consequence Tilted
by his sweetheart and who then hung
himself. Now, that is rather tragic, is
it not? 1t has a bizarre but none the
less poignant tragic note. Guy de
Maupassant indeed once handled al
most this same situation, but he han
died it from the opposite viewpoint,
and don't you remember how he mar
rated the first, the crucial, meeting Of
the lovers after Ben Battles double
amputation?
''But when he called on Nellie Gray
She made him quite scott.
And when she saw his wooden legs
Began to take them off.
''This treatment drove Ben to de-
spair:
so round his melancholy neck
A rope he did entwine
And for the second time in life
Enlisted in the line
"And there he hung till he was dead
AS any nail in town:
For, though despair had cut him up,
1t could not cut him down.
"There is a tremendous literature Of
humorous epitaphs. There must be, I
fancy, 10000 of these, but two of them
are all ] can recall. The first goes:
Here lies the body of mild Maria;
She went one day to start the fire,
But the wood was green.
So she used kerosene.
And now she's where the fuel is drier.
"The other is grimmer:
Life is a lie, and all things show it:
thought so once, and now 1 know it.
"Then there are songs on the side
splitting aspects of death, some of
which have caused tender hearted la
dies to double I'D with mirth. Johnny
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1902-07-24
A Cruel Joke.

Oswald, a witty and original Pari-
sian, had a mania for practical joking.
He was very amusing to his friends,
but when his talents We're exerted to
ayenge some wrong there was more
bitterness than fun in his wit.
One evening when man who had
not treated him politely gave recep-
ton he reyenged himself cruelty. The
man was slightly deformed. All the
hunchbacks of Paris, 500 in number,
presented themselves at his reception.
They had received notices from Os-
valid that If they would go to this adj
dress on this evening they would learn
Of a legacy which had been left them.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1902-07-24

city which was laid out by Brigham
Young and followers, viewing the
vast Mormon temple and the taber-
nacle building where fourteen thou
sand Mormons assemble to listen to
music that comes from huge pipe
organ that contains fifty five hundred
pipes and costs 500, 100000, and hear
the choir FIVE hundred and fifty
strong as they sing out the glad an
thems. From this city they will go
on down to Salt Lake and take
plunge in the briny waters of the
Great Salt Lake and here alone they
could spend a week very profitably
looking over the many items of in
terest. They expect to journey on
from here to California.
While Owen Idle was moving hay
on his farm near Brayton, one day
last week, the team became frighten-
ed and started to run away. Mr.. Ide
seeing the danger of serious accident
while the machine was in gear started
to throw the gear brake forward so as
to throw the gearing back and stop
the sickle from running at such a
high rate and dangerous speed and in
some manner lost his balance and was
thrown violently from the machine
to the ground. The wheel of the now
err passed over the entire length of his
body from his foot to his shoulder
leaving black and blue streak the
whole distance, beside badly bruising
the left side OF his body. AT first it
was feared that he was injured inter-
nally but on close examination it was
found be was only hurt from the Sc
we're bruises he is now suffering from.
He is now recovering very nicely but
is very sore and stiff as /, result of the
accident. Mr.. Ide considers himself
very fortunate in getting off as we'll
as he did as we often hear of many
fatal accidents resulting in runaway
with mower.
One of the most exciting and inter-
esting ball games ever played in
Brayton or the county took place at
Brayton the first of the week between
the Brayton team and Benton Bloom
ers, from over in Benton township,
and both teams put up good game
only four errors being made, two on
each side. After considerable contro-
versy the Benton boys came to bat
and their side was retired without
run. The Brayton boys next tried to
make hit but failed to score. The
Bentons then made score in the sec
ond inning. After this neither side
scored till the sixth inning when
Brayton made one, the only score they
made during the game, and Benton
made three. In the seventh neither
side scored and In the eighth Benton
added two more scores to their credit.
In the ninth both sides were put out
without run. Both pitchers threw
a fine game, allowing no one to take
base on balls. The score by innings
is as follows:
Brayton % 0 o 0 o 1 o O OIL
Benton. 80 0O 0 3 0 2 O-6
Batteries: Brayton, Burcher, Koob
and Franklin; Benton; G.. Morgan and
G. Morgan; struck out, by Barcher
y, by Morgan IL; hits, Brayton 5,
Benton s.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1902-07-24

Jones and His Sister Sue is one such
song, and bet that six people out Of
ten in America know it by heart.
YES" the publisher concluded, "un-
der the title of Deaths Funny Side an
anthology of many, many volumes
could be made. The anthology should
be bound in black pigskin, with grim
ming skulls and crossbones fooled in
gold on ftp Philadelphia Record.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1902-07-24
An Appropriate Name.

ut is a pretty NAME" the impress
sfonable traveller murmured. "but tell
me why do they call you Manita?''
There was an arch smile on the saw
age maiden's face.
Evidently" she said as she signaledi
to her brothers, who were concealed inI
the brush with clubs, you do not
know our favorite FOOD
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1902-07-24
Flat Noses Considered Beautiful.

In ancient Persia an aquiline nose
was often thought worthy of the
crown. but the Samaritan mother care
fully tlattens the nose of her daugh-
ter. Among some of the savage tribes
of Oregon, and also in Aracan, contin-
ual pressure is applied to the skull in
order to flatten it and thus give it
new beauty.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1902-07-24
Rather Airy.

sThere is an acquaintance of mine" "
remarked the doctor, 'who gives him
self airs because he was given up to
die thirty years ago and has kept him
self alive till now-hy taking-oSygen...
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1902-07-24
Not Very Smart.

There's no use in trying to make me
believe that Francis Bacon was very
smart man." said Senator Sorghum.
"Have you read any of his works?'
No, but his biography shows that
when there was 9ittle financial deal
on hand he wasn't clever enough to
keep from getting caught. Washing
ton Star.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1902-07-24

"How old is he now?' asked the pro-|
fessor
"Over eighty"
Hes what you would call an oxyge-,
marian, is he?" said the professor, look
ing at him with half shut eyes.-C hica-F
go Tribune
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1902-07-24

We have noticed that the man who
begins fight with velvet hand is
soon using club.-Atchison Globe.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1902-10-15

was under the whip and his hackers had
given up all idea of winning their money.
Not SO the jockey. He set to work to ride
with hand and heel. and by dint of his
strong finishing powers gradually closed
with the leaders, De Reszke, Huntressa
and Grand Opera, and passed the post a
winner by a neck Huntressa was second,
and Grand Opera third. beaten by two
lengths. 1t was great ride and the boy
came in for many congratulations. One
of his new employers, Foxhall Keene, was
present at the track and felt as much
elated over 1t as did the owner of South
Trimble, j. A. Drake, who had backed the
horse for considerable portion of his al
ready big winnings.
This was not the only good bet which
Lyme landed during the day for his employ
Granger; and Drake felt so much conf
dence in both the colt and his rider that he
sent in a commission which rapidly lowered
the odds from 10 to 1 to 7 to l. This race
was for maidens, three years old and up
ward; there were twenty-one starters, and
MacAna was favorte at to 1. Lyme wait
ed along patiently in third or fourth posi-
ton and when ready came on and won ham
Oily by two lengths.
j. A. Drake won the second race else with
the odds-on favorite Runnels, ridden by an
apprentice, Scott. He backed the horse as
IL he had every confidence in his maiden
jockey. and the boy certainly showed him
self worthy of it, for he rode an excellent
finish, winning by head from Lux Casta.
The Rancho del Paso proved a decisive
victory for the Jockey Club steward, An
drew Miller, who finished first and second
with Cfnquevalli and Wild Thyme. Fire
Eater was head behind in third place, and
the rest Of the field were beaten off by six
lengths P. J. Dryers Merry Acrobat was
a well-blacked favorite, but, as bystander
was overheard to remark: II cannot back
the favorite at 2 to 1; PILLS racing luck Is
too hard to win with a favorite." He was
fourth.
Kilogram won the selling race; and Hun
ter Raine, ridden by Cochran. beat Andy
Williams ridden by Lyme, in head finish
for the Handicap.
Runnels and South Trimble were the only
Lyme ttAo wins), Scott, o'connor. odom
and Cochran.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1902-10-15
STAR GOLFERS.
Smith Defeated Anderson at Fox Hills
9 Up and to Play.


Perhaps the two best known golfers of the
west and east, Will Smith of Midlothian
and VIII Anderson of Montclair, were the
two to fight out the last round yesterday of
the two-day free-fo all tournament of the
Fox Hills Golf Club near Brighton, s. l.
The result was a decisive victory for An
derson, for, while Smith played sterling
golf, the winner put up game phenomenal
in its strength. The game was better than
Is shown by the cards for on a pinch An
derson might have even done better. In the
morning the play was between the four
who had made the lowest scores on Monday
at the score game, VIII Smith playing Ber-
nard Nichols of the Hollywood Golf Club
and Anderson being against George Low OF
the Dyker Meadow and Ewanok clubs. All
conditions favored good golf.
The morning brought out two fine match
es. Nichols made a splendid fight against
VIII Smith, and was but one down at the
turn. He had the match all square at the
tenth green but Smith won the eleventh and
again assumed the lead. Now came sue
cession of five of the best-fought holes ever
witnessed in a golf match in this country:
The two experts played like team, and
each Of the five holes was halyed. Facing
the seventeenth hole one up with two to
play. Smith made the green in two, but
Nichols was short on his second and had to
play an approach to the green. Then each
took two puts. giving the match to Smith
by two up and one to play. Smith. to make
a sensational finish, holed out Ia three on
the home green.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1902-10-15
OF ALL SORTS
Evening Star Cup Won by the
Columbia Golfers.
CHEVY CHASE 8 DOWN
BOTH TEAMS PLAYED WELL I'm
FACE OF HEAVY WIND.
Races at Morris Park-Grand Circuit
Trots at Lexington-Among
the Bowlers.
CHEVY CHASE 8 DOWN

One of the most interesting golf matches
ever played in the District of Columbia
came off yesterday afternoon between the
teams representing Chevy Chase and the
Columbia Golf Clubs, on the course Of the
former, for The Evening Star cup The
Columbia team won by three up, after
playing steady and brilliant.
When the players of both teams gath
cred around the initial tee at Chevy Chase
at 2 o'clock yesterday afternoon, it was
found that a strong wind from the north
west was blowing over the course and 1t
was asserted that the driving would GER
tainly be affected. This proved to be true,
a big majority of the drives going around
the $50 yards mark. the only long drives of
the day being made on the eighth hole
where the wind was back of the ball.
Sensational Play.
But while the drives were short, the APP
preaching and putting by all the players
was of the sensational sort Time after
time the players would send the little white
ball upon the green. hoping for good pc
sition. but the strong wind would carry 1t
along. and as it frequently happened land
It in the coveted hole. putt of this sort
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1902-10-15

with a regularity that was most disheart-
ening, while Mr.. Douglas. with an accent
that would create sensation on the stage,
was telling how 1t all happened. At the
conclusion Mr.. Smith could hardly contain
himself from joy, while the last seen OF
Mr.. Douglas he was disappearing among
the trees on the hillside, having started out
to walk off his disappointment.
The first pair in. naturally were Messrs
Britton and Thompson, the latter having
won by up. Then came DR.. Walter Har-
ban and DR.. Compton, with the sensational
win on the last green for the former by /
up. This match was one of the prettiest Of
the afternoon. Both gentlemen started off
by topping their balls on the initial tee and
at time was there lead of more than
two strokes for either player. 1t seemed as
though when one man ran into bad luck on
one hole the other would meet the same
fate on the next, and the play went that
way almost over the entire course AS an
example. on the fifteenth hole DIR. Compton
went into bunke.. and. had he been count
ing the strokes, 1t would have taken about
eight to hole the bali. On the sixt eenth
hole DR.. Harlan drove OF into a bad FULLY
on the side OF the course, and 1t would have
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1902-10-15
Britton, Columbia, Driving.

was made by Marvin Thompson on the thir-
teenth hole, the ball going a distance of fully
60 feet the wind carrying 1t over against
the opponents ball and then dropping into
the hole Another spectacular putt was
made by DIR. w. S. Harlan on the home
green. His drive had carried the ball into
the high grass at the foot of the big trees
that surround the eighteenth hole and fully
10 feet away. The doctor started the little
white Haskell rolling into the teeth of the
wind. and it finally veered over, and when
the force was almost spent toppled over and
dropped into the hole. The big gallery that
their enthusiasm with loud shouts. A few
minutes later Ormsby McCammon almost
duplicated Dr. Harban's shot, putting the
ball in the hole from fully as great dis
lance. but the lie was better.
Although 1t was generally understood that
the match would start a 2:30, everybody
was on hand at o'clock and the play began
shortly after. remarkable thing about
the teeng off was the fact that the first
seven pairs got away from the initial tee al
intervals of exactly three minutes. MT.
Davidson. who had been paired with DR..
Gray, was late arriving, and the wait did
not do the latter any good. When Alexan-
der Britton and Marvin Thompson opened
the match with beautiful drives into the
face Of the wind, the gallery that had gath
cred around the initial tee was a large one,
and the work of each player was watched
with a critical eye. By the time the first
pair had gone over the course and were
putting on the home green. the gallery had
been considerably augmented, members OF
all the local golf clubs being In attendance,
and everybody was interested in the match
that had been talked about all summer.
The Professionals
The movements Of the professionals,
Douglas of Chevy Chase and Smith of the
Columbus, were interesting to watch. Each
had the greatest confidence In his own
team; defeat was out of the question to
either. When the different pairs were about
half way over the course both these clever
teachers had made the rounds and ascer
tanned the scores at that point. The figures
were so close that neither could get any
satisfaction out Of the situation, so both
returned to the home green to await re-
suits. Mr.. Smiths face presented a droll
appearance the scores were turned in
and the Columbus were sent to the rear
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1902-10-15
GRAND CIRCUIT TRoTS.
Harness Racing Resumed at Lexington
After Three DAYS of Rain.

After postponement for three days on &C
count of the bad condition of the track the
racing was continued at Lexington. KY,
yesterday In the first heat of the fourth
race serious accident occurred, which will
keep Driver Middleton in the hospital for
several weeks.
While scoring In this heat Laurette, with
Middleton in the sulky, swerved into Lady
Catherine and both sulkies were over
turned johnson, the driver Of Lady Cath
crime, escaped without injury. Middleton's
foot was caught in the wheel of his sulky
and he was dragged twenty yards. It was
found, on examination. that his left leg was
broken below the knee. his kneecap dislo-
Gated and he was otherwise bruised. Lady
Catherine ran away a mile, and later fin
ished fourth and sixth in the race.
Dr. Strong. the favorite, won the race in
straight heats. Lord Derby easily defeat
ed Chain Shot and Monte Carlo in the 2.O6
trot The 214 trot went to Invader after
six heats. A. J. D. was the heavily played
favorite and Baldia second choice.
Walnut Hal defeated the favorite, Char
ley Mac, in the FL trot. In the unfinished
2 25 pace Dorothy Wilton won two heats.
The track was slow.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1902-10-15
Chicago Nationals for Next Season.

CHICAGO, October 15.-President James
A. Hart of the Chicago National League
Base Ball Club has announced the names of
the men who will play next season. They
are as follows: Catchers, John King and
Thomas Raub; pitchers, John Taylor. John
Menefee, w. H. Williams, Carl Lundgren,
Jake Weimer of Kansas City, Frank Cor
ridon of Providence, e. F. Eyier Of Denver
and Davis A. Hardy; first base. Frank
Chance: second base. Robert L. Lowe;
shortstop Joe Tinker; third base, James
Casey of Detroit: extra, John Evers; out
felders James Slagle, David Jones, Richard
Harley OF Detroit, John Dobbs and J. e.
Frisk of Denver.
The new men are Casey, Harley. Raub,
Weimer, Corridor. Eyler and Frisk.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1902-10-15
BANK CLERK BoWLERs.
Columbia Team Defeated West
Ends

The Bank Clerks League was the only
organization represented at the Palace
alleys last night, the teams representing
the Columbia National Bank and the West
End Bank being the contestants. The
bowling of both teams showed decided
Improvement over recent work, the Column
bias getting two out of the three games
played. The West Ends got a good start
by winning the first game, but after that
the Columbias gained confidence and won
both remaining games.
The top-score honors of the evening went
to Elinger of the Columbias, who topped
over lo2 pins in the second game.
Following is the score in detail:
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1902-10-15
THE CoLUMBIAS.
MORRIS PARK RACES.
Extraordinary Riding by Jockey Lyme
on South Trimble.

Without doubt Lucien Lyme is as fine
rider as has been seen on the east
ern tracks for some little time past.
Inough perhaps not SO brilliant as
was Tod Sloane at times. he is far more re-
liable and consistent in his work. Yester-
day at Morris Park his ride on South Trim
BILE was fine display of horsemanship. ana
It Is doubtful whether others Of our best
Jockeys would have persevered with the
horse as he did when they found him beaten
fully three furlongs from home.
The race was for the Fairview Stake at q
mile and sixteenth over the HILL Half way
down the hill from the water tower the horse
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1902-10-15

delivered while he was protecting his face.
He was knocked down half a dozen times
and took the count four times. He failed
to land more than six blows.
Cans entered the ring In splendid condi-
ton, without any evidence Of his fight at
Fort Erie Monday night.
While disappointed in not scoring knock
out, Cans took the fight almost in the ma
ture Of a joke.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1902-10-15
CHEVY CHASE GOLF TOURNEY.
Contest Will Start Tomorrow With a
Big Entry List

The annual fall tournament of the Chevy
Chase Golf Club begins tomorrow morning
at 10 o'clock, with a qualifying round of
thirty-six holes. From the entry list In the
hands of the secretary the tourney promises
to be one of the most successful on record.
Many players of known ability from the
New York, Philadelphia and southern clubs
will probably take part while the local
clubs will send big delegations. The club
has hung up many handsome prizes and the
greatest interest prevails over the outcome
of the tournament
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1902-10-15
Connie Mack Signs New Fielder.

A special from Philadelphia says that
Connie Mack yesterday succeeded in land
Ing an outfielder whom he has been ex-
tremely anxious to sign. The player is
Daniel Hoffman Of the Springfield Mass,
club Of the Connecticut League.
Manager Mack yesterday went to New
York and there by appointment met Hoff-
man and Roger. Conner, the owner and
manager Of the Springfield club. Hoffman
had signed with Springfield for next season.
The, trio quickly came to terms. Mack paid
to Conner a substantial sum for Hoffman S
release, reached an agreement with the lat
ter on the salary question and obtained his
signature on a contract for two years.
HOFFMAN led his league In batting this
season and covered his outfield position in
lightning style. He Is also a pitcher and
won eighteen of the twenty-six games which
he pitched for the club this season. Man
ager Mack intends to use Hoffman in the
field exclusively, considering him too valua-
BILE as fielder to use in the pitchers box.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1902-10-15
Holley an Easy Mark for Cans.

Joe Cans was matched against Dave Hol-
ley Of woodbury., N. j., before the Lam
caster Pa. Athletic Club last night for ten
rounds, and, while the latter stayed the
limit. the bout was little more than farce.
Holley made almost no effort to Tight, con-
fining his work to running around the ring
out Of the champions reach and cfinchirS.
EOIley received terrible punishment, how
ever, from repeated biows over the kionsya.