New-York tribune., 1902-02-03
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

In the prohibition town OF Portland. Me, some
OF the restaurant keepers obey the liquor law. but
they try be good and have things convivial. too.
as witness such advertisements these Have
you tried birch beer in steins?' After the
theatre have welsh rarebit with root beer drawn
from the wood" "Order toby OF lemon soda
with the lobster"
She's not what you'd call an advanced woman
Has no mission in life I suppose?''
"Oh, believe she claims to have one but it's
nothing Of any importance"
Just a mission to make some good man happy I
understand. .'-(Chicago Post
pair OF enterprisng burglars visited Newburg
Ohio one night last week and stole a new one
story frame building from corner lot. The next
day they returned and tried to sell the lot but
the owner OF the property had meanwhile learned
of the removal of his house and arrived on the
scene in time to Illustrate their plans.
Not Exactly the same1"And she isn't married
yet? Gracious ir SHES WeH preserved ees she is the
ag@, ,..- .,, 49,. .,. sr. Ill :. .,,..-,....
w.'-(Chicago Tribune.
delpha department store. IAN old fellow from the
country up to my desk and. laying down
package said: Young man, here's suit of
derwear that I bought here seven years ago. Il
is too small for and I would like 70 have it
exchanged | thunderstruck at the nerve Of
the man. but managed to say something about
the time limit on such transactions Well said
ne. I know that but I've never had EN- and
this is the first time I've been in town since the
day bought en-
Mysterious Tltes'T understand. Mrs, Grassey.
dopteTist 09t THtt SO" mas "'e quite d" e""' 'ep-
Mercy on us. It amt nothing like klepto-
maniac is itc'-tWashington Times.
1t would be dimcult to overprsisc the value and
importance Of the work done by the many excellent
hospitals OF New-York. The annual report of
Mount Sinai has just been made public, and its
showing Is highly commendable More than two
thousand free patients received treatment in 1901.
and in the dispensary 0O64 prescriptions were
flled. The benevolence of this institution typi-
cal among the noble foundations of which New
York is justly proud.
WHAT Is A BLIZZARDc
I'It is doubtful what is meant by blizzard"
want to know what is blizzard:
II rhymes well. know, with wizard
Also with Surrey fowls gizzard.
But STILL what earth is a blizzard?
And Spanish chamos iTS %.s@ eaed e1ii1n aG lizard.
May my locks be abundantly sseissored
Some Som y say IT'S n storm 2nr that ca. can zz hard
II il means that get
Then back TO the States go. o blizzard!
-(London Punch.
Rome delivered her fighting men at points re-
quired on the hoof so TO speak and thus saved
money. The cost of carriage In modern military
service is the principal item in the business our
bill for the Philippines last year being 100000
What England has paid out since the South African
war began can only be oonjectured till the accounts
are all In and balanced. but 1t is a prodigious sum-
and enough to make her cast a favorable eve on
arbitration when another occasion arises.
III a shin began the comedian with the rose
tinted beard. is 100 feet long and 10 feet wide ana
its masts are 100 feet high and the bosun is bow
legged what does the capstan weight?
49, ~ ~ weighs the anehor! hoarseiy shouted the
audience, as it grabbed the benches to prevent
itself rising masse and doing violence To the
hespians.-(Baltimore American.