The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1902-06-20
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She-You were a long time in the
Philippines, wern't you? He-Oh, yes.
Ever since the first time the war ended.
Life.
Trolley Car Conductor Say, this nick
el is no good. Mr.. Endseat-Well, never
Ign Eagle. III
'Theretts one way that King Edward
an5keep; his chaplains busy What
Way?" praying for. a long reign
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Miss Perte-I< wouldn't marry a man
unless I>eould look up to- him. Miss
Oldgyrle- oh, we'll, Mile, you're young
yet Journal.
Jackson-1 hear your baby was kid
mapped. Currie-Yes. The kidnapers
have offered us 5000 if we will take
him back, but we are holding out for
more.-Life.
| Pedestrian-Will this road take me
out into, the country, little boy? Little
Boy-1 don't think it will; but if y wait
mebby a waggun Il cum along.-Ohio
! State Journal. J So
She-You don't think a girl is wise
to marry man; in order!to reform him?
He-Well, Iathink she is apt to have
the luck of the average reformer.-
Brooklyn Life.
City Boarder-Tells me, did you ever
buy a gold brick,s Uncle Josh? Uncle
Geehaw (of Hay Corners, disgustedly)
Nav. But I hey. bought lots of bricks
I thought Iras SolG, ,Brooklyn Eagle.
Eyes, Mrs. Bouncer wanted to send
her daughter to- Bryn Mawr, but she. de-
cided ~on Vassar.'"'',5 .sWhat influenced
her decision?" "She couldn't pronounce
Bryn Mawr. "=ePhila elphia Bulletin. 81.
Parson Jackson-In de mattah OBJ
watahmelons, L 's'pose you b'liebe
stolen fruits am always sweetest? Sam
Johnson-1 dunno. I amt nebahheat
any but de one kina.7Ph Phi delph III
Press. ssse.ss 4 .f@s'.a.s : +
McCourt-You know something about
horse racing. What is meant by 'the
favorite2 Sport-A .favorite is horse
that would surely win if people only
wouldn't bet On =, him.-;7Philadelphia
Record.
Teacher what is an. islapaa Bright
Boy (who hadAbeeng read ding the news
papers since Dewey sailed into Manila
Bay)-Agn island is body of land en-
tirely surrounded. by the United States.
New York Times. ~ ~ -
Miss ssAppem That Clara Wilder is
as$good al 4 circus! Think or her be-
ing engaged three times this summer!
Mr.. GoodheArt (extenuatingly)-Well.
she wouldn't, be an up-to-date, circus
without three rings!-Judge.
Mr.. Frontpew-I am glad you belong
to our church choir, my dear; it is'such
an orderly organiza ton; never see you
Whispering To- one another during ser
vices. Mrs. Frontpew- none of us
are on speakin 81 terms.-Ohto +. State
Journal.
Mr.. zPitt-These quarrels about the
battle Of Santiago make me excessively
weary. Mr.. Penn-Me, too. Pretty
soon Spain will get it into her head that
she wasn't licked at all, and then she
| will demand repossession Of Cuba
Philadelphia Press.
She petulantly)-I don't see why you
should hesitate to get married on fG00
a year. Papa says my gowns never
cost more than that. He-But, my dar
ling, we must have something to eat
ooh, William. Always thinking of
your tomachv-Tit-Bits.
The time for reflection: "Biddy," Pat
began, timidly, ''did We liver think av
marrying" "Sure, now, tn subject has
niver inferred me thoughts" demurely
replied Biddy. cts sorry OF am" said
Pat, turning away. EVAN minute, Patv
called Biddy, softly, "ye've set me a.
hinkin'."-Bazar.
| Economy in the East: briggs must
| be getting queer in his top story"
"What's the proof?" "He had his bare
head out Of his Office window at noon
yesterday, and when l asked him what
| he was doing, he said he couldn't afford
a regular hair cut and was trying a
SINCE" -Cleveland Plain Dealer.
! Stranger-Didn't understand you to
say you'd just come from the Buffalo
exhibition? How did you like it?
Chance acquaintance-Pooh! Its
poor little paltry two-penny- half-penny
affair. Don't begin to compare with
Stranger Indeed. By the way, how
are things in Chicago now?-Puck.
Transparent excuses: Nov, don't
tell me any story about misfortune, an
wantin' to be a hard worker, m all
that" said the hard-faced lady; 81
can see right through you." "Gee"
said Dismal Dawson; II know amt
had nothin' to eat for three days, but I
| didn't know it had thinned me down
like that.-Leslie's Weekly. r. *@
! Circumstanttal evidence: / E, Papa
Where's my umbrella? I'm sure l put