Tazewell Republican. [volume] (Tazewell, Va.) 1892-1919, 1902-10-09
The TenderfOOt
in Wyoming ~
BY z. X. WOOLEY.

II HE TenderfOot sided cautiously
around the half-open door of the
Managing Editors sanctum, after
which he deliberately and with ex-
tre@ne care seated himself upon the
softest chair therein.
"Well," he sighed, "I'm back"
81 see," replied the Managing Editor
"Where you been"
Casper, Wyoming" said the Ten
derfoot.
Couldn't you go little farther?"
facetiously inquired the Managing
Editor.
went as far as my pOcketbook
would let me-" retorted the Tender
foot. Besides, I've got some uncles
and cousins and aunts out there"
Here he shifted his position slight
ly, with an accompanying groan.
"Sick?" unsympathetically asked
the Managing Editor.
"Riding horseback" explained the
Tenderfoot Zone of those measly
little sleepy-eyed, white-faced bron-
cos. Had a back like an arch in
suspension bridge. Kicked in four di-
rections at once. See-sawed with both
ends and made me think of my happy
childhood, while l held onto the sad
dlehorn with both hands and said
prayer words in a different arrange
ment from what my mother taught
me. And when he finally lit on the
ground it Jared the marrow in my
spinal column. Say, you ought to see
me! l look like an Easter egg with
my clothes off"
The Tenderfoot groaned again, and
the Managing Editor leaned back in
his chair and yelled.
ooh, say!" he gasped. You're good!
You are!"
The Tenderfoot looked fattered and
continued.
81 stuck, though-buti it's spoiled my
handsome, symmetrical shape. Been
walking bow-legged ever since.
"You know, always wanted to go
out west, so when got my two weeks
leave of absence l counted over my
/
get me out to Casper and back. I
therefore packed my grip wired one
of my uncles l was coming and choo-
chooed out of the railway station that
same evening.
at takes two nights and two days
to get to Casper, and wouldn't walk
a mile to view the scenery on the way
until after we passed the Wyoming
state line From there on l found
sections worth seeing. 1t gets billy
and rocky, and sandy, and sagebrushy
and cactusy and snakey. l can't help
but think there must have been vast
sea there in past ages. We went
through part of the Wyoming bad
lands I might remark that they are
positively obnoxious-especially the
rattlesnakes. I saw one IA feet long,
two feet wide and"
Forget it," suggested the Manag-
ing Editor.
"Well, 1 don't want to build a resi-
dence in the Wyoming bad lands, ;"
insisted the Tenderfoot. at is hor-
ible-horrible-the essence of hope
lessness-a glaring, pitiless, poison
Gus, waterless hades for damned souls.
Yet they say there are no more fer
tile lands in the world if there was
only water there. And farther on,
where there is water, and wherever
the slim irrigation canals wind their
way, there are green fields and trees
and flowers. Teddy Roosevelt knew
what he was doing when he put that
irrigation business through-and say,
talking about Roosevelt, you ought to
hear what the wild and woolly west
thinks about him! didn't see cow
how out there who hadn't slept side
by side with Teddy when he was rough
ing it.
81 don't know what L expected Of
Casper. Maybe thought it was made
up of tents, canvas-top wagons, yell
ing cowboys and dirty Indians. If l
did | was disappointed. When first
set foot in the place l thought I'd
got turned around and was back in
Chicago Honestl Lively? 1t has
| three big hotels brimful all the time;
three department stores doing rush
ing business every day in the week;
a whole block of saloons that are roll
ing in wealth and working overtime;
two banks, two newspapers and S32
inhabitants, every one Of whom tends
to his business so actively that he con-
stantly keeps the air stirring violently
around him. That must be why it's
so windy in Casper. Going out on the
street was like turning the corner of
the Masonic Temple at home here.
"I had prepared myself to do with
out bath until my return to civiliza-
ton. What was my establishment to
find a modern bathroom, with all at
tachments, in my uncle's house-run-
ming hot and cold water! He also
had telephone in the house. You can
have your choice of gas or electric
lights, and Uncle Charlie is even talk
ing of installing hot water heating
plant in his house this fall. How is
that for frontier town in the wilds
of Wyoming?
"There isn't a poor man in Casper.
I wouldn't mind living there. It's the
same altitude as Denver, and sick
person is a curiosity. The name Of
the masculine element is Charlie.
This includes horses, dogs and China
men. Occasionally you find Bill.
Anyone with a more high-fown front
name is looked upon with suspicion.
didn't tell them that mine is Alger-