The Nezperce herald. (Nezperce, Idaho) 1900-1957, 1902-04-17

A Rising Man: "And have you no am
billion 10 rise in the worldT' Sure
maam' I'm porch climber."-cieye
land Plain Dealer.
Thrown together: Egbert = Know
herr Filbert = Yes. Egbert- Quite
well? Filbert- We were thrown to
gether from the same automobile
Judge.
You say O'HanDagan leaves the or
phans home large legacyf" 'Bedad.
It's purity large" How much r
Twelve children an goat. begorra. "
-Tit-Bits.
Towne-i see Gayman had 10 pay
Miss Hoy $4,000 for breach OF prom
Use. Browne Yes. aud now he's trying
10 marry her for her money.-Philadel-
phia Press.
An expensive luxury Mr.. O'Toole
( lentering doctors office shure. doctor.
oi think oi have APPENDICITIS. DR.
Smith Nonsense. man. You haven't
money enough for that Judge.
Doubtless she was: Mrs. Browne
And who is the president OF your club
now. Mrs. Maiaprop? Mrs. Malaprop
gproudiyD-i am the present encum
brance. just Philadelphia Press
John" she said. do you think you
can AFFORD new gown for me;y He
looked az her sharply. "Hage you or
dered itf' be asked Yes "Tben.
he said. Il can afford Chicago
Post
Dobbs-You ought 10 do something
for that cold Of yours. a neglected
cold often leads TO serious conse.
quenoes. Mohts This one is not neg.
leetei- Four or FIVE hundred Of my
friends are locking after IL.
MIR Wise Johnny can You tell me
why the little hand on my watch goes
faster than the big onef Johnny iafter /
mature reflection Papa. isn't Il for /
the same reason that have TO run 1
when | go walking with youS-Ex- +
change
Parsenue- l hear the Newriches
claim 10 be better of than we are
Mrs. parNenue-T That's perfectly ridicu
lons. Everybody knows we have more
money. Why. we receive over twics
as many begging letters as they do
Town Topics
"oh, come now. I s'y." exclaimed the
Brltisher ~You must admit that were
ahead q yon Ia a grite many w'ys."
I'm one great particular ! admit you
are. said tie Yankee And that is:r
Thine. It's 5 o'clock in London. and
rs ouiy , here Philadelphia Rec.
ord.
Too Much FOR Him; cfvll Service Tx. ,
amlnes VERY siergiiy. 10 Eras;us Smith,
'olor,.d, who aspircs 10 the office II
NAH carrier How far Is Il from the
.arih 10 The moon; Hrastus On terror
-s;olly. boss, 81 yo's gwine to pui me {
m dat route don'I want de job !
Judge.
The prima Donna after the FIRST actl
\ won't so on again unless thar box
,ariy makes less noise. nearly had
lystprlcs, The Manager lin snrprisel-
didn't hear any noise, The prifna
ponna You didn't Why. they en-.
oreSI that upstart of a contralto four
lmcs.-puck.
Plausible Enough: Ascnm How did
on make out with that story you sent
b the klaptrap Magazine? Scribblef
Rejected. fancy IT was too clever
umToo cleverg Scrihbler-Y Yes. I
oppose they were afraid it would dis.
act attention from their advertising
ages. Philadelphia Press.
What's in a Name: festive writ
n Name Woody an invitation to my
"a. | supposed | must. Jcss-Ycs. but
,u've spelled her name Name"
ess That's So She spells Il May
-e." doesn't shef lesson, no; she
a three months ago: but lis Mail
b me- Philadelphia Press
john she whispered. there's
irglar in the parlor. lie just bumped
,ainst the piano and struck several
VS." you don't say. I'll go right
wn." said he. ''oh. John, don't do
ything rashf' "Iiashg Why. I'm
ing TO help him. You don't suppose
can remove that piano from the
use without assistance. do your
Press.
Bargain Day: Just after her hus.
nd had arrived Mt the hospital his
&c regained consciousness. ibid she
/ ity' the wife asked feebly. Get
lat. dear?" he answered bending
pr her. why. that last yard of rib
a marked down from ten cents;
v Il first. and made up my mind the
Ter woman should not have II with
n struggle. Ohio State journal.
Now that you have frittercd away
ir money" said the stern father,
fore the quarter Is half gone you
ne to me FOR more' Father" re-
ID the prohlgate young college stu.