Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1902-05-16
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One touch of rumor makes the whole
world chin. The Schoolmaster

one touch of rumor makes the whole
world chin. The Schoolmaster
What do you do to cure your boy
when lie Las bad coldf' u tell him
he can't so skating unless he stops
coughing"
Teacher-Can anyone tell any re-
markablc fact about George Washing.
ton? Tommy-He was never caught
in a lie.-Life.
Wife-Oh, doctor, Benjamin seems to
be wandering in his mind. Doctor (who
knows Benjaminl-Don't trouble about
that; he can't go far.
A Choice II wonder what Patrick
Henry would say if he lived in Cuba
today" "Oh, Give me Liberty or give
me Annexation Elk.
do you believe in love at first sight.
Christ Sure. II more men took
closer look they wouldn't fall in love-"
Philadelphia Bulletin.
HE proposed TO her as a joke"
"Yes?' well she accepted him. He
does not regard himself as a humorist
any more."-Brooklyn Life.
She-How many men owe their sue
cess in life to their wives? He-1es,
and how many more men owe their
wives to their success in life.-Life.
Physiclan-Ths is the worst case of
indigestion | eyel. saw. Impossible.
doctor! | haven't eaten anything but
. Al I.s.F ety MOI
Life.
+ Jaggs-Doctor, my wife has Insomnia
very bad. She often remains awake
until 2 or 3 o'clock in the morning.
What shall | do for her? Doctor-Go
home earlier.-Tit-Bits
Lucie-I always give the prettiest
embroidered things | do to my moth
en- Marie-That is kind and thought
full of you. Lucie-Yes; then l can
borrow them, you know.
Her Husband. SIS your husband
good provider?" asked the sympathetic
visitor. "Indeed he is mum. He got
me three new places to wash last
week. Youths Companion.
Barber-That's strange. You say you
have been here before. | don't seem
to remember your face. Victlm-Prob-
ably not You see. it has all healed up
now.-Glasgow Evening Times.
"You say you never gossipy Never"
answered Miss Cayenne. when feel
disposed to hear my neighbors discuss
ed | merely mention name and pro-
coed to listen. Washington Star.
First Bulgarian Bandlt-The chief
has cut the ransom to $1,000. Second
Bulgarian Bandit-Yes. his idea is TO
close out all the missionaries on hand,
to make room for new stock. I'm told.
New York sun.
Clerk-Mr. Shipper was in while you
were out; he said he'd call again to-
morrow. Proprietary Very kind of him.
! Clerk-But he wanted to collect bill.
Propretor-yer kind to say when he
would call.-Boston Transcript.
mo one ever got possession of any
thing worth having without working
hard for it." said Mr.. Bicllers. some
what pompously. Quite true" re-
marked Mrs b. Il remember | OBJ
tanned you without any trouble
A Counsel of Behavior. \ conductor
said Iii tone of great severity to pas
senger who was making considerable
disturbance on ear: Remember. sir.
that you are on Il public vehicle, and
you must behave as such. "-I4ippin-
colts Magazine.
Very Particular. Lady-Are your an
tiques all genuine? Clerk-Yes, ma
dam, and we so guarantee them. Lady
Well, all our furniture is antique,
and wish to get a, genuine antique
Louis the Fourteenth carpetsweeper.-
! New York Weekly.
Not Worth Saving Mike going
down a ladder)-Hould on Pat. Don't
I yez come on the ladder till Dim down.
It's ould and cracked Pat getting on)
+ ARA, be aisy. 1t would sarye tn
boss right to have to buy a new one
New York Weekly.
Doctor-I congratulate you, sir. You
are the father of a fine girl. Subbubs--
oh, my Well never raise her. Doctor
+ Tut, tut. Why do you say thatI Sub
bubs-lt seems utterly impossible to
keep a girl here more than n week.
Philadelphia Press.
Mr.. Nagget-Oh, what's the matter
with you? You're forever finding fault.
Mrs. Nagget tsweetly) that
equalizes things; you're forever losing
one Mr.. Nagget-Losing one? Mrs.
Nagget-Yes. your temper. Surely
that's a fault.-Catholic Standard and
Times.
"Of course, you've read Homer's
story Of Ulysses and Calypso. haven't
you?" mo, really can't say that |
have. There's SO many books keep
coming out now. don't you know, that
| just simply don't pretend to keep
track of them all.'-Chcago Times