The St. Louis Republic. [volume] (St. Louis, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1902-04-20
The Hest She Could Do.

The best She Could Do.
"There is only one reason he said. why
7 have never asked you to be my VIE.
What is that she asked.
II have always been half afraid you miga'
refuse"
Well she whispered. after a long 81
lence. II should think you'd have curiosity
| enough to want TO find out whether your
suspicion was well founded or not. -Chi-
cago Record-Herald.
MnlaprOpOs.
Cadleigh: II thought 1 had met you be
fore, Miss Browne"
Miss Browne: No: 1 guess ii was m,
sister"
Cadleich: Perhaps 50. The Miss Brown'
i ! met was rather pretty."-Phiiadeirhi;
! Press.
Inserarable-"Now. then. Willie saif
Uncle John. aren't you tired looking al
| the Monkeys" \ right reluctantly re-
Piled the boy. who was on his first visit e
the Zoo. Now let's so to the place where
the organ grinders cage is."-Phtladeiphia
, Press.
There seems to be very little sickness in
your village
Yes: we've only one doctor, you know,
and he is extremely unpopular. personally
Analysed.
Yes. Miss Bilkins has really written a
tale with the genuine New England limos
! phere."
What's that?"
Oh about n~ine-tenths old maid and the
rest made up Of equal parts culture pie and
Browning"
Landlady who has been looking for the
boarder's umbrella: I'm satisfied, Mr..
Blake, that il has been stolen.
! The Boarder: You may be satisfied. Mrs.
flasher, but Iii be blowed il l am."-Glas-
gov Evening Times.
Kittie: "Really. I did not know what to
think when Fred proposed TO me last even
ing. Why, he hadn't known me more than
/ n week" Ellie: Perhaps that was the
reason, dear.'-Boston Transcript.
Let us make the capital stock $780,
COO, said the first promoter.
\ right" said the second, who was
| preparing the prospectus on the typewriter
"Nill It he hard to increase that capital?'
asked the first.
NO. indeed. All I have TO do is to hit
this o key a few more m baltimore
American.
II must say that your appetite has
greatly improved of late."
Yes" answered the hypochondTiac. My
doctor said he would have to limit my to-
bacco. He said l might smoke a cigar
after each meal. I am now eatlnS SIX
meals a day.'-Washington Star.
Why He Refused.
Deacon: Refused to fight him, did you'll
All, that's a noble boyI Now, Tommie. tell
the LITTLE hoy vhy yoi refused"
Tommie: cause he kin lick me."-Wom-
ans Home.
Johnnie. Paw. did you ever hear Nv the
missin' link?''
Father (absently): "You mean the miss
ing ball. No. and that makes the fifteenth
I've lost this season."-Bcston Post.
ut beats ALL said the American.
still harping on the beet" said the dis
susted Cuban, as he turned away, and. sick
at heart, wondered when Cuba liore would
begin to libe.-Chicago Record-Heralda
A Request for Explicit Information.
Are you thinking only OF the present?"
asked the serious man, 'or are you doing
your duty and trying to leave something for
those who come after your
Those who come after rne?" repeated the
man of genius, pensively. DO you refer to
posterity or my Observation-Disclosures
Star.
He was being gently haned about his
stammering. He took the badinage with
customary good nature.
'T-t-that's fright, b-b-boys" he smiled,
TIM q s-stammerer all right. Wh-wh-why
Wh-when / w-w-wa-wa-When / w-want
vinegar for m-n-my s-s-s-salad. 1 c-c-caIl
for s-s-sweet cider and It's v-v-vincgar
b-bub-by the t-time I g-g-gst tr'-san
yIansa0co Bulletin.