Evening journal., 1902-11-03
ADVERTISEMENTS
WERE MOCKERIES
Men Tell Of Irritating An
nouncements When They
Were Out of Work

Were Gut OF Work
The advance agent met the leading
manlof another show the other night,
and, ,as they had not seen each other in
seven years, there was a warmness
about their greeting that was refresh
ing.
Dear old Toni" said the leading
man. II was thinking of you not five
minutes ago. Sit down, you dear old
fellowl passed bakery not five min
utes ago, and / thought Of YOU Why,
here's Whilst 1 was just saying to
Tom that 1 never see Il bakers that 1
don't think Of him. Tom and were
poor oncel Mighty poor too. l re-
member that we had been turned out
OF different homes on the same cold
night and met each other for the first
time by chance. We shared the COM
forts Of q butchers wagon that night
and went upon a rummaging expedi-
tlon the next day. We halted in front
Of n German bakery, half starved and
disgusted with life generally. There
was a huge sign in the window which
said, There Is No Cake Like Ours We
hadn't q penny between us, but Tom
stepped in and asked for a sample Of
the cake. The Dutchman didn't ap-
preciate the humor Of the request, so
Tom said You may keep your cake,
boss; but, say. give me a chunk Of
bread quick. or I'll cut out your giz-
zard.' I'll never forget that cake sign
because It took us hours TO get away
from the police who were attracted to
the scene by the bakers cries for help"
"But that was not my only expert
ence with a peculiar sign," remarked
the advance agent after a hearty laugh.
"The year before / went ON the road
for the FIRST time / was in as hard luck
as ever man was / had pawned ov-
erything In sight and was almost starv-
ed. / found an umbrella in the hall
way Of down town building, and the
janltor told me to keep it. 1t was a
fairly good rain shield, and l immedi-
ately carried It to mine uncle. / didn't
know this particular relative, although
1 had formed the acquaintance Of hun
dreds of his people. His place was on
Sixth avenue, and he gave me 70 cents
on It, which gladly accepted. AS he
was making out the ticket he said:
" DO you want TO save it from the
mothsT
ayes answered.
"'That viii cost you - cents. Per
haps you would like to have It insured
1t is always advisable, but it win cost
you 10 cents more replied my friend.
IAN right l said. Take good care
Of it, He could have eaten it for all
cared, for l never intended to redeem
It. was about to leave the place when
l saw a big sign on the far wall. II
said:
"'No extra charge for putting watch
es and iewelry in the safe in the office.
watches and jewelryl 1t brought
the tears to my eyes, and as l cIawlet
into my 10 cent bed that night
thought of diamond necklaces, pearls
and rubles Of priceless value and-cake
Oh, the curse Of some signsl How they
mock the poorw
They were all silent n moment bu
the one addressed as Willis was thu
first to resume conversation, and hI
said:
"There's my friend, Big John Smith
Let me introduce him. Since you chaps
are talking Of signs and hard luck. le
me tell you of the time that / had t
leave my trunk at the old Steven
House, on lower Broadway, and ligh
out by the shades of midnight to sc
away from a hotel bill that l couldn'
pay. Everything / had in the worl,
was locked up in that trunk, and as
could not remove anything without ex
citing suspicion l thought 1t best t
keep out of Jail by leaving everything
behind me. / must have walked tn
streets at least a week famished an,
penniless. One afternoon ! was pass
ing along an up town street. hoping t
die, when I happened to look up ant
saw a sign as big as my hopes wer
small. This sign read;
awe Are Not Daylight Robbers
Trunksl Trunksl From the Batter
to the Harlem Bridge to Your RooI
For % Cents
IF that sign was not the irony c
fate in my case do not know wha
to call It,"
"Oh, that's a small affair alongsid
of my experience" said Smith. 1T
,N,ly few years ago too. had bee
unemployed for several months, and o
had six little shavers to take care Of
did not have much trouble spending III
little money had saved. 1 didn't seer
to have a friend in the wide world
turn to, and / spent my last copper fC
a paper TO examine the employment co
umn. 1t was about Christmas tim
and 1 dreaded going back home to fac
the scolding landlord. 1 recall that
stopped in front of the Harlem ofiiC
Of newspaper to see the holida
crowd go by. and as did so 1 saw
sign that made my blood run cold.
said:
"'There Is No Reason Why Yo
Should Be Idle. Insert a Want A
-Four Cents n Line
"The pronoun was printed in in
mense letters, and / had the create