The Minneapolis journal., 1902-08-27

respect, of Berlin, Vienna, st. Petersburg,
Paris and London. But the society de-
clares that the details down to the mi
nutest feature Of its code embody 1.-The
truest good FORM and mo well-ordered
mind can ignore these regulations and yet
expect to be a harmonious member of So
ciety." The mistake the sticklers for such
minute regulations make is in supposing
that there can be no good manners unless
their code Of etiquette is fully accepted.
They are like the Pharisees of ancient Ju-
dea, who laid down innumerable petty re-
quirements, which the law of Moses did
not require to be done and which kept the
Jew who tried to practice them on a pain
full tension continually, from the time he
got up in the morning until he went to bed
at night. There are certain canons of
good breeding which should, Of course,
always be recognized and practiced.
Courtesy between people is a necessary re-
quirement Of social usage, but true eti-
quette is not the Juggling in of excessively
numerous laws Of conduct the laying of
mere mechanical and physical details upon
men and women. 1t is entirely beyond the
province of a work on etiquette to in
struct rational people how to converse in
society, how to crack jokes, etc. The So
ciety Of Self-Culture becomes tyrannical
dictator in this and in other respects,
where freedom is demanded. Ella Wheeler
that 1.-The social code is as important in it's
way as the legal code" and ignorance of
etiquette Is without excuse" That is,
the social CODE so minutely laid down
by the Society Of Self Culture.
Such distinguished writer's on good form
as Mrs. M. E. W. Sherwood, Margaret
Watts Livingston, Harriet Hubbard Aver
and Adelaide Gordon, lay down the code
for dress, amusements, weddings, CONVEX
| sation, calls, cards, receptions, dinners,
breakfasts, luncheons and suppers, table
manners, funerals and correspondence.
The social code of society is as punctilious
as to funerals as it is with regard to we'd
dings or theater parties. Society must
stick to the code even in death and pass
to the other world with becoming defer
ence to the minutest details of the instru-
ment. Seven pages are devoted to funer-
ais. The period of seclusion by mourners
| is laid down as three weeks. After that
they have more liberty, and, at the end of
six monts. they can begin the old round
of amusements. This six months period
I is not observed by many society people,
however, for they are sometimes back ''in
the SWIM in few weeks, Ito divert their
minds" .: ,,~e ,. ~
The directions as to street car usage
| are very good, but the fewest number of
| ladies observe the requirement to thank
/ a man for giving up his seat The di-
reCtions as to eating are minute and over
4 done. Mrs. Livingston dispairingly admits
that "there are persons Of undoubted good
breeding who persist in lingering their as
paragus and in deyouring their corn on
! the cob, She pronounces this as "sav-
age, methods of feeding" which should be
confined to the privacy Of the savage's
/ own home, and even there 1t is a shock
| ing sight" It is, indeed. awful.
There is an interesting chapter on eti-
| quette for servants. Mrs. Livingston who
/ writes the latter, lays down the law Wig
orously and incidentally complains that
"the American mistress has slovenly
i habit Of speaking of her female domestics