The St. Louis Republic. [volume] (St. Louis, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1902-04-20
5-And decides that to eat it is the only way.
Sweet

Mrs. Youngwed: YES. Mr.. Younswed
didn't feel at all we'll this morning. so l just
made him stay home from the office"
Mrs. Naybor: Indeed, / notice all your
, carpets are up, and your back sheds paint
ed. and -"
Mrs. Youngwed: Yes, ! got Mr.. Young
wed to do all that while he was home to-
Observation-Disclosures Press.
Mrs. Jones: lust think of It. That fell
low came in and actually stole the clock
right of the mantelpiece."
Mrs. Brown: And your dog was in the
very same ROOM
Mrs. Jones: Yes: but that didn't count.
Fido is only a watch dog, you
Boston Transcript.
Hands Full-McJigger: That's something
l never knew before
Thingunbob: What's that
McJigger: Why. nearly all the breweries
in town allow their employees twenty or
thirty glasses of beer a day"
Thingupbob: 18th idea. l should think
| they'd have their hands full all the time
Philadelphia Press.
John" said Gaytog's wife, this is some
thing you should take TO heart This paper
says: A real gentleman always dresses
quietly"
We'll. don't r. replied he. adjusting his
diamond stud in his neglige shirt. Il never
SfJ dNNNN 'ASS = 49, hs NNhAtaA
hutton or Observation-Disclosures Press.
1t happens too oft
That q peach among women
Throws herself away
On 4 green persimmon.
Chicago Tribune.
I'm awfully fond of dancing" said
klumsay. as he steered her through the
waltz
indeed" replied the fair partner. Il
suppose you'll try TO learn some time.
Observation-Disclosures Press.
La Montt: Here is a periodical devoted
TO air navigation
La Moyne: "Ah, 1t must be a fy-paper."
philadelphia Record.
Yes. you see he was told he'd have to
stop drinking during office hours"
And has he actually stopped"'
We'll. yes. he's stopped having office
hours."-Philadelphia Press.
Beg pardon said the suspicious looking
character meeting Subbubs in a dark street,
but what time have you?'
Just enough to catch my train" replied
Subbubs. as he FASTENED on.-Philadelphia
Press.
The Husband: Why is 1t that women al
ways say, III be ready in two seconds?'
IA IL uLuP o"N why I'D " mat
men always say, "Oh. I'm ready now?"-
Brooklyn Life.
Mrs. Odd: Mary. where is the whisk
broom?'
Mary: WHY. mem, We we're all out o.
breakfast food and / had to chop 1t up for
Mr.. Odds breakfast."-Chicago Daily News.
His Lordship: Prisoner. you have the
right of challenging any Of the jury If you
desire to do So"
Prisoner: Right y'are, guv'nor. I'll fight
that little black-whiskered bloke at the end
If he'll step outside. '-Tid-Bits.
Doctor Joanes: II say. waiter, I believe
you've got palpltation OF the heart. haven't
your" Waiter: "Yessir; and they're I'M
common nice to-day, sir. Will you try
some. sir ?"-Chicago News.
Hewitt: I've lost my best friend" Jew
EFT: why don't you advertise for itT'
Hewitt: What DO you mean?" Jewett:
Il thought you said you had lost your
pocketbook."-The Smart Set
II see q crank out West announces his
invention Of a .theater hat for ladies that
will shut up when the curtain rises II
he'd only invent a box party that would do
that he'd deserve a Observation-Disclosures
Press.
Mrs. Lawrville. (which would you rath-
er do to-day. go to schooi or help me in the
school" .Wo,id you? Why?' "'Cause
teachers Ill an. there amt Eoin' to be any"
Beginning to Wake %.
Mad: Ibid be marry her for lover
Jack: II thought so"-somssvtls Jour
nal