davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12

81 hope. Mr.. Starrbarder." said the
smiling landlady. that you are salts.
fed with the table"
Indeed, I am. Miss Scrimpen. These
prunes are delicious. and If you please.
ma'am, l believe I'll take another OF
those luscious chicken wings"
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12

"You ray ths defendant then cxccut.
cd q bnckdown. Are those tho words
you uscd!" asked the lawyer. who was
badgcring the witness.
"Ycs. SIR" answered the witness.
II would like to have you inform
mo how man can execute back.
down.
well. sir. he could hang his head.
couldn't hc?" said the witness,
ficrccly.
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12

His Medical Adviser-You won't last
long at this rate. young man. you
are burning the candle at both ends.
Gayboy-Very well. doctor. When
the candle is burnt out I'll light the
gas.
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12

Il haven't had single call since
opened my ONCE ten days ago." com.
planned the newly fcdscd n. ID. Here
I sit day after day like Patience on n
monument"
"oh. well. don't get discouraged"
rcjoincd the sympathetic friend. ITS
only n matter OF time until you have
patients under monuments"
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12

Il understand says tho wcii.rcad
person. that the witnesses Of tho
coronation were limited to sixteen
square inches OF space. cannot help
wondering what was the effect Of this
restriction"
'Efcct!" echoes the other man. 1T
will do more for tho nobility than all
tho straightIront corscts that have
been advertised In the last ten years.
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12

Mrs. Weeds" said MIR. Binks. II
asked your daughter to marry mo and
she referred mo to you"
I'm sure that. very kind Of Susie.
but then she always was dutifui girl.
Really. MFR. Binks. ! hadn't ,nousht Of
marrying again at my timo Of life. but
since you insist suppose We make Ito
wedding day the twentieth Of this
month";
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12
Dazzling Opportunity.

The professional mountain climb.
cr's foot slipped when he was near tho
summit. and he started for the plain
below by the shortest and most direct
route.
GOSH" he exclaimed. a. he went
humping from rock to rock. III I 1.-Two
to reach the bottom what story this
will make for tho magnzincs!"
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12

Mamma-Why. Willie. you asked
for two pieces of candy. and you got
them. Aren't you satisfed?"
Willie-No'm, | amt. You gave up
so easy I'm jest l,icliin' meself cause
l didn't asst you for more.
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12

Tive come to pay my bili." said tho
patient. "onc hundred and ten dol.
lars. believe"
"Yes." said DR.. Price Price. max.
ing total OF STA"
Il don't quite understand"
THAT brings II up to date. including
to-day. My charge for ONCE visits.
you know. is So
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12

received my greeting with . fnnd
bow. Gossip about her WAS rife thers
and the story was going the rounds
that. having been Tilted by tie man
she loved. she had married old Crack.
sathorpe In a 1T Of pique.
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12
certalnIy a clever MAN.

"Is he good lawyer"
"a good lawyer. Why. say! rye
known him to prove the truth of what
isn't so, and not half try"
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12
May-Just think n minute.


. II hear your motherin.law had a
narrow escape from death yesterday.
Yes, I seem to have been born un.
der an evil star; my best dog was run
over and killed at the same time"
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12

Would you like TO trade your mule
for this automobilc?" asked the face
tious tourist.
mo. subj" answered Erastus Pink.
ley. EFF mule gifts contrar. you
kin allus Deepen on him to move
when he gifts hungry. But when n
automobile balks. dc case is hopeless"
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12

Book ngcnt-This book, sir. will tell
you how to keep bugs from your pota.
toes, how to rid your barn of rats
Uncle Eben-You amt got no book
that tells you how to rid n farm Nv
book agints, hev yer?
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12

This talk about inventions bein'
injurious to labor Is all nonsense"
said convict No. 15l.
why so?" asked the guard.
Because It is. A patent burglar
alarm wuz the cause O. me gittin' Ave
years at hard labor"
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12
She MIaht.

II wonder II she regrets her mar.
riage?"
why should she?"
well. you know they're both liter.
AIRY. and now her husband thinks him.
self entitled to every bright idea she
has"
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12

Mr.. Henry Peck Turns at Last
Ownership Of the Dog Made I'M
mense pIfferenee-Retribution for
Cieyeiists.
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12
"Why Hsnry!"

Mrs. ffcnry Peck e n. m.)-oh.
Henry. I'm afraid II I go to sleep
shall never wake up again.
Mr.. Peck-for heavens sake. go TO
sleep!
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12

It's curious how mad 1T makes some
girls when man kisses them and
acts like he didn't think they were
objectina
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12

rs your wife ever speechless with
Indignation"
"she says she is, but have reason
TO doubt It."
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12

May-I met some one to-day who. is
very much enamored of you.
Fay latter thoughtful pause)-
Who was 1t.
May-Just think minute.
Fay-Im thinking, thinking hard.
May-You'll never guess that way.
Think of something soft.
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12
Anyhow.

81 see it has been decided by Mis-
souri, court that tobacco is n necessity
of life"
well, so it is in Missouri"
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12
n
BITS OF INFORMATION
Il,

Rs s woa ss :s'e R ssa to mssssss
Man said be subject sub to s, G different ssss
i. ssx s tom.
T T % ss arg sGs sss' IN pair
Eaee Sas ase 1900 aa year
the sspess y man S Ss ~os
take dog you Atlantic
Tse pig s a " sas
proportion size ny walks thirteen times " fast as man can
the product Of female
probably under
and most in
shortest nations Of
America in New York
public auction like other
of tho same
a The lark rises
and fourth
the heart within
mans heart travels
omnao established over
for
deep The mountain
nearly
Italy s ueui'a'ed which
bill recently passed by the senate has tho record of
boiler modern locomotive equal to
tin S @ 1t. sss, sn other metal Silver then
of tho at tho depth OF
s s.s ss. s s the record of
would laid end to
boaaaiy
Zealand Its
no sa win sleep bed lying .sa no a or % m seer Toxic
ss sIa 1s merely Ss ss' @
Europe II S o
IN: % @ ; Ss;s s S % IN. ..a
cent ] ss s @ %
for s s s to s ' a p ss sn a ,sa aSss
H' , as so ss s
There re-, arc nss SG asnTsn essy s sI = 400 Bottles o,
ss S.ss saa S % s and
this she stands second only Great Britain Germany rnm ,
% No fewer than 400, np'ss s nsys ssa sad % s.,
the calm hour and
Morley all in
him
vanadlum one of the rarer metals property copper
fine wire vanadium 5000
" %onr the richer classes as in 900 live sixty years age in tho
while ss ~. a ,s pa
Mr. Harry de wind the leader of expedition describes the
Niagara the
sterling
a
indignant the
n
timber inches to 10 inches thick
five nS ssa s
presenting sets of stereoscopc
by 5as
old
himself
throatw n
of
Is
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12

But 1t was your own dog"
"oh! Ah-er. why. old man. he was
probably playing with you and bit
deeper than he Intended. He's such
a playful dos!"
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12

Jibbs-why. What's the matter
with you. old man?
Jabbs tgroaning)-Ive Just been
bitten by a blankety-blank dog.
Jibbs-What an outrage. Why don't
you shoot the Internal beast? He may
be rabid. Anyhow. 1t is duty you
owe to society. and the dogs owner
Rocky Ford enterprise. (Rocky Ford, Colo.) 1887-1950, 1902-09-12
sALLIEs OF TESTERS

TWO COLUMNS OF THE BEST
ANTiDoTE FOR THE BLUES.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1902-01-09
PRESS OPINIONS.

ETThe Ohio democrats Will earnest
ly hope that any misunderstanding be-
tween Mr.. Foraker and Mr.. Hanna will
be war to the knife this time.-Wash-
ington Star.
rTPeru has deserted the silver
standard and the agitation for the
gold standard in Mexico is growing.
The old ratio in practice is plainly a
losing game.-St. Louis Globe-Dem-
ocrat
GTThe democrats appear to be
afraid that President Roosevelt will
not get into fight with Senator Han
ma. The president and the senator
from Ohio understand the situation
and each other.-Cleveland Leader.
ETlt may be remarked to those dem
ocrats who are denounciug the Kan
sas City platform that it is the latest
and therefore the binding expression
of democratic principles, and will con
tinuc to be such until the next dem
ocratic national convention.-India
apolis journal.
Ey5ecretary Cages retirement from
the cabinet will give the 81 told you
so" fraternity a chance to gloat. AS
every member of the cabinet was on
their list for retirement, the doctrine
of chances was sure to give them ma
terial for self-conrratuation, sooner
or later.-Washington Star.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1902-01-09
CAGES RETIREMENT.
Effective Work of the Secretary of
the Treasury by President
McI<InIey's Appointments.

The retirement of Secretary Gage
from the cabinet, which seems to
have been decided upon, will be a
distinct loss to the country. His APP
pointment by President Mckinley at
the beginning of his first term was
universally regarded as an ideal one,
and went far toward establishing in
advance confidence in the financial
policy of the administration. Mr..
Gage had so high a reputation as a
practical banker and tinancier that
it was felt that he would carry the
same conservatism into the manage
ment of government finances, and
that as long as he remained at the
head of the treasury department it
would be on the best of terms and
in close touch with the business in
terests of the country. This has
proved to be the case. The secretary
has managed a number of important
financial operations very skillfully,
and, while recognizing his first duty
to the government, he has not for
gotten the close relations between
the treasury department and the
people and the duty of its head to
regard their interests as well. Close
adherence to these lines has made
his administration of the treasury
department remarkably successful
and has indicated the wisdom of
calling to that important position a
trained financier and business man
without any previous experience in
or knowledge of practical politics.
Until he became secretary of the
treasury Mr.. Gage had never held an
office, and no doubt his retirement
from that office will be his retire
ment from public life, says the In
dianapolis Journal.
An attempt will doubtless be made,
in fact, is already made, to create
an impression that his retirement is
due to friction between him and
President Roosevelt, but there is no
evidence of this nor any reason to
believe it. There is obvious reason
enough for his retirement in the fact
that, having held the position nearly
five years. he has already got out of
it all the fame and all the satisfac-
tion there is in it for him, and nat
urally desires to resume his original
and congenial vocation as a banker.
From a pecuniary point of view he
has doubtless made a considera bic
sacrifice every year he has held the
office. He deserves well of the coun-
try and should carry with him into
private life the hearty approval and
good wishes Of all the people.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1902-01-09
TODEFEAT MERGER
Officials of Seven States Meet at
Helena, Mont.
They Decide 10 Begin Proceedings In
the Courts in Minnesota TO Pre-
vent the Proposed Console
datiOn of Three Great
Hallway Systems.

| Helena, Mont, Jan IA definite
! plan of action to defeat the proposed
consolidation of the Northern Pa
citic, Great Northern and Burlington
railway systems was unanimously
! agreed upon yesterday by tne cover
nors and attorneys general of seven
northwestern states in which those
roads have mileage. Legal action will
be instituted Immediately in Mime
sofa courts with this object in view,
Just now, when or where these
| suits will be brought, neither Gov.
Van SAINT, of Minnesota, nor Attor-
ney General Douglas would state.
The conference adjourned late Tues
day afternoon after adopting resolu-
tions condemning the proposed
merger as contrary to sound public
policy and pledging support to any
proper legal action which may he
brought to test it's validity. Other
resolutions adopted call on congress
to investigate the subject and favor
the granting of power to the inter-
state commerce commission to fix
maximum rates upon Interstate
business.
Minneapolis, Mimi, Jan. Judge
William Lochren, of the United
States circuit court, yesterday dis
solved the temporary injunction is
sued in the case of Peter Power
against the Northern Pacific Railroad
Co. by Judge Elliott, of the district
co, TT of Hennepin county, on Mon
day The injunction which was dis
| solved by the order of Judge Loch-
rem restrained the Northern Pacific
from issuing any evidences OF indebt-
edness to retire the preferred stock
of the company, or to retire the pre-
ferred stock in any other manner
than. by the use of the surplus net
earnings of the road.
1t also restrained the Northern Pa
cific and its managers from entering
into any agreement by which the
road would be consolidated or
merged through the medium of the
Northern Securities Co., with the
Great Northern or the Burlington, or
either of them.
Judge Lochren held that railroad
corporations could not do indirectly
what the law prevented them from
doing directly, and that any method
by which consolidation of two or
more competing and parallel lines
would be brought about would be IL
legal, and writ of injunction would
lie to restrain the consummation of
the plan. But that there was moth
ing in the case as presented to him
to indicate the stockholders of the
Northern Pacific Railway Co. were
attempting such a consolidation.
Mr.. Powers attorneys authorized
the statement that the fight had just
commenced and that they will appeal
to the United States supreme court.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1902-01-09
LARGER SCHOOL BUILDINGS RE-
QUIRED.

Owing to the recent large influx Of
population into Western Canada it
has become absolutely necessary in
many parts of Manit oba, Assiniboia,
Saskatchewan and Alberta to in
crease the school accommodation. In
many places buildings have been
erected that are only half-occupied.
This is perhaps as good evidence as
will be found not only of their satis-
faction with their present school sys-
tenn and their confidence that it will
remain as it is, but also of their firm
belief in the future expansion of the
country, in increased immigration,
and it further indicates that they
have little fear that the well estab-
lished rate of births in civilized com
munities will not be maintained
there.
The free homestead laws and the
cheap railway lands offer great in
ducements, which are opening up the
new settlements. Agents of the Gov
ernment of Canada are actively at
work in different portions of the
States for the purpose of giving in
formation to possible settlers, and
advertisements are now appearing i'm
a large number of papers, giving the
names and locations of these Agents.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1902-01-09
BARTLEY is PARDONED.
The ex-State Treasurer OF Nebraska,
Who EmbeZZIed aauge Sums, Is Re-
leased from PrisOn.

Lincoln, Neb., Jan. 1.-Gov. Savage
last night granted an unconditional
pardon to Joseph S. Bartley. former
state treasurer, who five years ago
was sentenced to 20 years in the peni-
tentiary ON conviction of having en-
bcz2lcd $2O1. 900 of state funds. The
pardon went into effect from the mo
ment it was delivered to Mrs. Bart
ley by the governors private secre-
tary. 1t was presented to Warden
Davis at the penitentiary half hour
later, and later, with his family and
lawyer, BARLEY was brought in AGAR
riage to his home in the city.
Bartley has been in the state prison
four years and six months, in addi-
ton to year in the Douglas county
Jail while his appeal to the supreme
court was pending. His entire short
age is alleged to have been 100000,
but he was convicted on the single
count of obtaining $201,000.
Gov. Savage makes an extended ex-
PLANTATION of his reasons for granting
the pardon. Primarily, he says. he is
led to believe that the ends of iuss
tice have been met in the punish
ment already inflicted. He thinks
the cnormity of the crime was not
such as to merit the sentence i'm
posed. Further, he finds eXtenuating
circumstances. Mr.. BARLEY, he says,
was state treasurer at time when
the whole country was undergoing
financial depression. Owing to de-
preciating values many Nebraska
banks were on the verge of collapse
and it was with the best intentions
and to tide them over, the governor
urges, that Mr.. BARLEY advanced
them state money.
Much of this had been lost, for
which BARLEY stood responsible,
though he did not profit. The COVER
nor finany gives the names of sew
eral hundred of the most prominent
men in the state appealing for the
pardon. Four thousand others, he
saws. have made the same request.
The governor also refers to the
parole granted BARLEY last July,
which he iustifies. 1t was given, he
saws. because it was represented that
by so doing it was possible for the
paro1ed prisoner to make collections
OF money, which would be restored
to the state. The action of the re-
publican state convention, demand
ing his return 10 PRISON, while he re-
garded ii unwise, seemed to him
mandatory, and he cancelled the
parole.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1902-01-09
BRYAN'S CONTRIBUTION.
Opinion of the Late Leader ms to
what Constitutes II DEM
Ocrat

In a late issue of the Commoner Mr..
Bryan makes a contribution of some
little value to the extremely meager
Information bearing on the question:
what is n democratic" He makes an
urgent plea for the continuance of
fusion between populists and demo-
Gratis. He says that they are separ"t-
ed only by the difference of opinion
as to the redeemability of grec0-
backs and the government ownersE D
of railroads. He declares that for the
present united effort ''to save the
greenbacks" is necessary, and ths
differences of opinion can be SETTLED
later. Cooperation between pOpulisia
and democrats must continue, tie
only question being whether it shaI
be between their separate party o.
CARNATIONS or among individuals ur-
der one organization. "This is a ques-
ton" he declares. (which must be de-
termined largely by local conditions.
If the populists were to join the demo-
cratic party they would strengthen
the reform element in that party and
assist in preventing the reputation OF
the principles of the Kansas City plat
form. On the other. where the popu-
list party is strong as compared with
the democratic party, it may be wiser
to cooperate than to attempt the ANAL
CANA ton of the parties.
Mr.. Bryan's view, says the Albany
Journal, seems to be, then, that
democrat IS either populst adherent
of Bryanism or a democratic ally of
pOpulism; in other words, he is either
a popocrat or a demopop. From this
il might be inferred that if Mr.. Bryan
could be induced to make a direct and
uneqaivocal answer to the question
what is democratic" it would be:
"There isn't any"
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1902-01-09

1t is said by "A correspondent Of the
Baltimore Sun that West Virginia is
rapidly becoming more and more the
mecca of the negroes OF the south.
The climate of that state, as a whole,
is congenial to this race, and the
great coal and coking industries in
operation in almost every county, to-
gether with the extensive railroad
construction being carried on, fur
nish ready, as well as lucrative, en-
ployment for negro laborers, of
whom $4,000 are employed in the
mines.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1902-01-09

The Electrical Review gives data on
the telephone business i'm the United
States, showing that including all
companies there are 4,311 c.,cnanges
in operation with 2,278,717 telephones
in use. The total capital invested is
nearly $5OO,0OO,0OO. One company en-
ploys 5000 persons, and handles a.
total of 2,0OO,OO0,O0O calls per year.
The manufacturing side, says the
electrical Review, is estimated TO
produce total of 5000 telephones per,
day, this annual output of instru-
ments with their accessory apparatus
being valued at between S50,0O0,O 600
and $60,OOO,O0O. The telephone in-
dustry, which is only % years Old, has
become one of the most important
i'm this country and the authority
quoted states that it is now at the,
beginning of an extended growth.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1902-01-09
a Disnstroue Collision.

Kcithvillle, La, Jan. 2.-One life
was lost. two persons were seriously
injured and part of a car of valuable
race horses en- route from the winter
meeting at New Orleans were de-
stroyed in disastrous collision Wed
nesday between a Southern Pacific
fast freight and a Houston & West
Texas freight on siding. Twelve
cars of the Houston & West Texas
train caught fire and burned to the
trucks. W. j. Daniels, of lHouston,
fireman on the Houston train, was
caught under the wreck and either
crushed or burned to death.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1902-01-09
ELECTRICITY is LIFE.
Prof. Loeb Announces Another Dis
cOvcry-PrOf. NOvy's GerIniciGc.

PTOIs hOeD announces HAiOtEarN hiS~
cOvcry-PrOf. Novy's GermiciGc.
Chicago, Jan. 1.-Prof. Jacques
Loeb, of the University of Chicago,
in a paper read yesterday before the
American Society of Naturalists an
nounced that he had discovered the
physical processes that accompany
life and that electricity and not heat
energy is the basis of life. He does
not claim to have solved the problem
of "what is life" but to have proved
a theory which overthrows a funda-
mental portion of the teachings of
text books on physiology.
1t is said that while Mr. Loeb's
experiments in prolonging life are
important, thus far they were APP
plicable only in the case OF single
animal cell and therefore of narrow
Imitation.
Another paper w+ich attracted
special attention was that read be-
fore the meeting of the Bacteriologi-
cal society by Prof. f. q. Eovy, Of
the University OF Michigan, who made
public for the first time the result of
his struggle to find a perfect germi-
eide His results were beyond eN-
pectatiuns. for he has, it is claimed,
discovered an organic peroxide which
is absolutely destructive of organic
life, and which can be taken into the
system by human beings with perfect
immunity.