Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1902-08-09

characters about?" Bocker-"Only two
policemen"
AS they reckon time: "How long has
she been on the stage?" only aboue
three divorces. Chicago Record Her
aid
Some one has named a cigar after
Mary MacLane. 1t emits blue fame
and sulphurous smoke.-St. Paul
Globe.
Nathan Hale is reported to have said-
II am sorry that l am not a cat, so
could give nine lives to my country
Harvard Lampoon.
"NOodelles never disagrees with any
body" Yes; that's what makes it so
disagreeable to have him around."-
indianapolis News.
Father-"Well. my son, what did yow
learn at school to-day?" Little Proc
tor-"Not TO sass Tommy McNuttf"--
Chicago Daily News.
Bragge-"I was knocked senseless by
cricketball two years ago" The boy
in the corner-''When does yer expeck
ter get over it?"-Tit-Bits
Truths echo: GOOD men. you know,
are scarce" Yes, know. and even
bad men have TO make themselves SO
at times, Boston Courier.
The optmist: Grandpa-"Wen. TIor.
ace, we haven't caught any fish; it's
hard lines" Horace-"But we had good
luck digging worms, "-Chicago News,
Pugilistc- Nell-"Did Miss Bilyums
act as IL it was severe blow when she
didn't get the princc?" Relieves.
she took the count. Philadelphia
Record.
Suuday-school teacher-"And so Lots
wife was turned to salt Can any one
tell whyY Wicked Willy (from the
rear)-"She was TOO fresh. Harvard
Lampoon.
Hordhead-"Well every man has &
right to his opinion Pepprey-"Yes,
but the trouble is he can't be made to
realize that there may be wrong to
1t. philadelphia Press.
THAT author keeps his identity close
ly concealed" Yes" answered Miss
Cayenne; until read his books
thought It was due to modesty.' Isn't
it|' NO. Discretion. Washington
Star.
Far from 1t: Girl with the Gibson
girl neck-"Fan Billiwlnk has begun to
show her age, hasn't she?' Girl with
the Julia Marlowe dimple-"T should
say not. She's begun to try to hide IT."
Chicago Tribune,
II was her first ride in an automobile
and she was deeply Interested in the
horn that was used to notify people to
clear the way. Papa she said.
'Well?" he returned. Make 1t snorc
some more. Chicago Post
Haven't you read that lovely new
novel;" asked the first summer girl
NO" replied the other. the only cdr
ton of it I've seen has a horrld yellow
cover that doesn't accord with any OF
my gowns. Philadelphia Press.
sociable; well. we'll" remarked
Farmer Korntop at the Zoo "this here
lion pears to be real good-natured."
"Mebbe," suggested his good wife, it's
one o. them social lions We read about
in the papers. Philadelphia Press
/ This Is Il remarkable climate" said
the tourist ~ is answered the old
settler Ever since have been here
] have wondered how a climate could
! change so many times a day and every
time for the worse. Washington Star.
Upgardson-'I hear there Is some
complaint that the continual dampness
is rendering many pianos useless"
Atom~"I have heard Of its running a
great many pianos, but haven't heard
any complain about it."-Chicago Irib-
une.
The ntendont-"Now. children.
why do we love to go to the beautiful
parksi What do we find there that is
always freshcr ard purer than it Is la
the city, Truthful Tommy with
cheerful promptncss)-'Pop-corn. sir"'
Tx.
Yes count, IN all the park there is
no place / like so we'll rs under this
old old tree" (Slghing scntimentallyI
There are tender associations, you
see" Aha, comprehend, nam selle.
You have yourself planted the trce!''--
Punch.
81 can't imagine anything more nm.
satisfactory than a meal ut our board
ing house." said The chronic kicker
"Nof" replied the impressionable young
man. Evidently you never got kiss
from your bcsI Girl over the telephone 3"
philadelphia Press
How does it come you resigned your
position as office bOyy' inquired the
gentleman Of little Jimmie: didn't sou
like your employer" Yes" replied
Jimmie, Il like hir0 well cnuf, bur
didn't like tn brand nv Secgars he
smokes Ohio State journal
Baker-"Dldn't see you in your auto
mobile yesterday" Buucr-"That was
because was under 1t. probably.
That's where | spent tue greater part