The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1902-05-30

We see the open
Trolley car.
w. ]. Hampton in New York Herald.
\ colored man, about 80 years of age,
drove up to the depot with load Of
baled cotton, and he had just begun to
unload when an old, headed negro
with a bad limp came down the street
and shouted at him:
SAY, yo Dusson dere!'
Hello, Uncle Joe!' saluted the other.
Nov, den. what sorter man be yo':''
demanded the old man as he reached the
wagon.
''Hu! What yo' mean by dat?'
Il mean, sab, is yo' a man Of honah
or not!'
all excited dis mawnin'. What's de mat
tah?'
''Sam johnson, I'ze got darter Lin
da"' replied Uncle Joe as he straight
ened up and waved his arms about
Yes, Of co'se. Yes, sab, yo's got a
darter Linda, an she's a powerful ine
gal"
last Sunday night, Sam johnson, yo'
aXed dat gal to marry yO'!''
"Hu, hu! Sunday night? Lemme see.
Say. l reckon did.
''Of co'se yo' did! She said she'd do
it, an the marriage was sot fur dis
mawnin' ht 10 O'clock
'Hu: Shoe! Ten O'Clock dis maWnin'
Why. reckon it was, Uncle Joe. Yes,
we was ter be married dis maWnin
But yo' amt dar, sahr'
"Dat's /; fack. Jist clean slipt my
mind
But, what yo' gwine to do, sah-what
20 gwine ter do?" shouted the old man,
as he danced around.
''What l gwine ter do? Am Linda all
ready an de preacher dar"'
Yes, sab"
Den yo' cum around heah an hang
OH to dat off mewl an hold him stiddy.
an III run ODER an marry Linda an
be back heah in ten minits. II NIaja}i
Jones Gums long an wants to know why
dis cotton hain't dun unloaded 20 tell
him dat OWN to a disreckoleckshun OF
a matrimonial disremembrance lZe had
to prOcrastinate fur Il few m!nlts. tai
weston Daily News.
ADDRESS TO JOHN BULL.
J. B., with anger and despair,
I mark your swiftly falling star:
Soon, soon. cid man, you won't know where
u r.
Soon YOU will wake-confounded, dumb
TO shame and ruin past redress,
All that YOU arc, J. B., become
And driven shameful to the wall,
stripped of your 'baccy, beef and sea,
You'll start to find for you its an c,oho
Dave Wickham was perhaps the
first white man who went to abide OH the
shores of Chazy lake, one of the purest
and cleanest lakes in the Adirondacks,
lying at the foot Of Lyon mountain. In
its prinleval state big game r0amed the
wilds, and this lake, in the midst of a
amount Of trout in a days catch.
Dave had one bad quality-an inordi-
nate love for strong drink. In his latter
days he always carried his two-gallon
jug to Pittsburg, when he Travelled along
the trail Of marked trees to sell his fish.
Dawes credit was not very good, and
sometimes he was obliged to return with
the jug empty.
One morning Dave logged the jug into
a Plattsburg grocery store. in which
there were always barrels of whisky in
the cellars. On the way David had
stopped at a spring and filled the jug
! half full Of water.
Il want q. gallon of rum. and want to
pay for it, announced David, and he
put his jug down in a manner which
would indicate that it was empty.
''All ri ght," said the storekeeper.
Sometimes David had money after
bringing down lot of trout, and the
storekeeper thought that this was one of
the occasions. Ere proceeded to draw a
gallon of rum in his cellar and bring it
up and pour it into the jug. Dave picked
up the jug and started for the door,
when the storekeeper stopped him.
Il thought YOU said that you wanted to
pay for that rum?' called the storekeep-
well, do. but hain't got no money
just now. Next time l come I'll have
some trout. and"
Here, here. that won't dor
The irate storekeeper forced Dave to
pour out the gallon measure full of rum.
and Dave departed suddenly, apparently
humbled and injured, but really happy,
| with half gallon of whisky, diluted
with an equal quantity of water-New
York Tribune.
''Now that we have the plans for my
new twenty-eight story building said
the Millionaire 10 the architect, ''perhaps
YOU can suggest good name for it-one
that will be characteristic. you know"
''Well.' replied the architect, lin view
of the fact that it's so very, very high,
I helieye I'd name it The Prime
But before they could paint the sign
meat went higher than the building. and
the name was again inappropriate. Bal.
tinore News
a distinguished Episcopal clergyman
was once called on to ofticiate at a fash
ionable summer resort church, and, find
ing only short surplice and no cassoci
IN the vestry, was very much disturbed
at the thought Of having to appear in
a venture that to the frivolous would
look like white shirt and trousers. But