The Jennings daily record. [volume] (Jennings, La.) 1900-1903, 1902-06-12
HuMOR OF THE DAY.

s.What is your fortune. my pretty maid:
INV fortune sir? 1t is my. face
80, we'll. don't he ashamed" he said,
Philadelphia Press.
.Boohoo! Johnnie Jones has moved
awayr' Were you so fond of your
little playmate?' NAV! but, boohoo!
He was de only kid on de block couiu
lick "-Brooklyn Life.
First Neighbour hope my dauSh-
ter's playing doesn't annoy you?"
Second Ditto-"Oh, no. not at all! we
got our landlord to reduce our rent on
account of it."-Answers
Miss Styles-"Do you know. L think
this cloak must look awful Miss
Ames-"The idea Miss Styles-At
any rate, it is just as comfortable as IL
can be.'-Boston Transcript.
She-.'What is there about me-poor
little me-to attract IL man of the
world like you?" Be-"You are the
only girl that never asked me if you
were the only girl / ever loved
Mother-"Now, dear. why don't you
run away and give grandpa a kiss?"
Child somewhat nonplussed by grand
pas moustache and beard)-"I don't
see any place for it. mamma!'-Funch.
She said she meant to speak her mind,
And wouldn't take much time to do it;
The other said, with sheer unkind,
1t wouldn't take long if she knew 1t.
Chicago Record.
Hodd--"Hang it ALL Do you sup
pose I'll ever make a good golf play
err" Todd Observation-Disclosures, old
man. You think too much of your
family and your business. "-Harper's
Bazaar
The trolley car stops; an Irish lady
and ten children climb in. Conductor
Are those your children, madam, or
is il a picnic +" The Lady-"They are
nv children. and it's no picnic. The
Schoolmaster.
Fond Parent-'Goodness. child, YOU
are soaked" Please. pa,
fell into the canal Fond Parent
What, with your new trousers on
Frankie-"I didn't have time, pa, to
| take 'em off.''-Tit-Bits.
My dear sisters exclaimed the
club woman, I'VE should all stand to-
gether" An hour later, on her way
home in a crowded car, she became in
| dignant because no man offered her a
seat.-Philadelphia Record.
Tess-"Jack proposed last night, and
accepted him. Jess-"Did you,
! dear? BY the way, don't attempt to
cut glass with that diamond, as L did,
| or you'll make another nick i'll the
| stone ''-Philadelphia Press.
| do you attach any credence to the
| theory that men are developed from
monkeys said Willie Washington. Il
| think that some are" said Miss Cay
| enne The others appear to have re-
! manned stationary. Washington Star.
| Walked Twenty-Five Miles in Sleep.
| Sound asleep, Kenneth Hughes, q
| student of the Lake Forest Academy,
made his way from his room at the
| academy to his country home near
| Loon Lake, Ill.,, twenty-five miles dis
| tant.
The sleep-walker only knows that he
| went to bed as usual in Lake Forest,
and was awakened the next morning
in his fathers barn. The duration OF
his somnolent state was from shortly
after o'clock in the evening until b
O. clock in the morning. 1t was at the
latter hour that the boys father. who
is a farmer, went TO his barn to feed
his stock and found the young man
propped up in the family buggy still
sound asleep.
The soreness of his muscles seemed
to confirm the superstition that he had
walked from Waukegan to the farm
PHILADELPHIA Record.