davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Colfax gazette. [volume] (Colfax, Wash.) 1893-1932, 1902-01-31

j. 81. st. Lawrence has opened an Of
flee on Main street, opposite Gazette
office, where he is prepared to give music
lessons, and also has pianos and organs
for sale. Those who contemplate buy
ing such instruments should see him, az
he carries the best grades at reasonable
priceso
The Colfax gazette. [volume] (Colfax, Wash.) 1893-1932, 1902-01-31

Seattle populists have decided to place
a ticket of their own in the field for the
coming municipal election. Fusion with
democracy was voted down, practically
IA tO I
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
A WON An

Goes at an unpleasant task in a
manner decidedly surly.
Appreciates the value of money only
as it affords an aid to her vanity.
Has an easy, airy way of talking
about the qualification of ambition.
Shows her disposition most forcibly
when an attempt is made to drive
her.
Who has a fondness for diamonds
makes that fact painfully conspicu-
Gus.
Flushed with wine sees the romance
of love in colors of most brilliant
hues.
May be shrewd enough in a business
transaction and silly in an affair of
the heart.
Takes on an entirely different dispo-
sition after the electric lights are
turned on.
Feels greater degree of RESPONSE
bility for personal appearance than
does man.
Will often wear gloves at variance
with the remainder of her ATTIRE
Philadelphia Bulletin.
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
SOME POSTSCRlPTS.

Japanese national flags are alleged
to be practically unobtainable just
now in London.
In all Egypt there are only 1,211
medical men. of all nationalities; Goa
of them are Europeans.
Over $4,000 rabbits have been
trapped during the past year in the
municipal rabbit warren at Torquay.
Out of male population of less
than 600 the Wiltshire (England) vii
lage of Box sent thirty-six men to the
war
Warsaw, Russia, is to have a statue
of Chopin
Britain last year imported no less
than G1,352,OO0 worth of musical in
100000 worth from Ger
many alone.
The Chinese have the idea that milk
revives the youthful powers and that
it has special virtue as winter food
for old people.
The sum of the Bowdoin prizes for
dissertations in English, Latin and
Greek at Harvard will be doubled, the
fund having been increased from $l5,-
900 to $4,000.
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
MANY A MAN.

Has wrecked fortune in the effort to
hold a place above his station.
Gives time and attention to subjects
unworthy of sensible considera-
ton.
Makes a lifelong enemy by telling the
entire truth.
Finds himself frozen out of a position
when he has felt himself most Sc
cure.
Gives himself weary moments through
a feeling of supersensitiveness.
Takes things for granted through too
much enthusiasm.
Fails to understand how deeply he
wounds the feelings through an
overplus of sympathy.
Stands in his own light by Indifference
to friendly advances.
Unconsciously acquires dogmatic
manner through too much atten-
tion from others.
Makes his influence felt by what he
insinuates, rather than what he
actually tells.-Philadelph Bull
letin.
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
A PRETTY GIRL

Naturally feels that she is entitled to
masculine admiration.
Shows off best when she is trying to
be an agreeable companion.
Often creates adverse criticism by
taking on an air of superiority.
Sometimes finds herself neglected
when she most desires attention
Will cause trouble in a social assem-
blage without being conscious of
the fact
Assumes a sort of matronly air when
approached by an admiring school
boy.
Takes unto herself prerogatives which
often make her associates fear for
consequences.
Is touched to the quick when a man
praises the other beauty
Likes no make men believe she is
above posing for effect.
Has the satisfaction of knowing that
other girls secretly envy her
charms.
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
PENCIL POINTS.

True valor knows when to run.
Wisdom is silent. You'll know Folly
by the bells.
A man OF resources isn't always q
man of means.
It is only after love is dead that
people dissect it.
Adversely is the sauce of life; but a
lot of us don't care for sauce.
A man will save money for twenty
years for the chance to drop it all in
five minutes of speculation.
A woman generally sees through her
husband. Also she generally goes
through him on the evening of pay
day.
It is easy to understand that every
body else is liable to die at any time;
but we, ourselves, are going to live
forever.
Oars time to preach" said Uncle
Shad, "and time to keep STILL It
ain no use tryin' to make a man wifi
de grippe b'lieve be ain de mos miz-
zabul man on de face OBJ de y'earth.''
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
CAREFULLY THOUGHT OUT,

Returned prospectors say that, so
far as Alaska is concerned, the Ameri-
can constitution is dead. but they ad-
nit that even there it will keep long
time.
An advertisement in a morning pa.
per reads: Woman wanted for wash
ing Mondays" Can il be that the
other days of the week do not need
washing?
A mushroom grown in England
measures forty-one and a quarter
inches in circumference. Boom towns
will take notice and pattern after the
new model.
There is talk of using a steam shov-
ell to scoop up the gold in the Nome
districts. Look here, stranger! When
it comes to scooping up gold an Amer
ican raj .ionaire can beat any shovel
ever invented.
AS Morgan and Gates closed little
deal John said to Pierp: Pears to
me I've got few dollars coming" and
Pierp, reaching down in his jeans.
brought up handful of checks and
paid the difference right there. 1t
wasn't much; only eighteen million
dollars.
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
LiFE'S REALITIES.

People fall into love while love itself
falls out.
Matrimony is like rope walk-lots
of twists in it.
A woman may forgive brutality, bur
never Indifference
Love is romantic. Matrimony dc
cidedly matter of fact.
Love is often an evolution-a reso.
lution-and-a dissolution.
Pedigree and poverty are a sorry
combination scheme for matrimony.
If money is the root of evil many
would like to pluck it up by the roots.
Many a heavenly love affair in it's
earthward flight is lost in the sea of
matrimony.
Some people ask more questions
than prosecuting attorney, and then
wonder why you avoid them.
People who are always waiting to
be shoSed sometimes stack up against
some real agonizins thrills
If l were man l would rather be
called all the mean cusses" in crea-
tion than be alluded to as pretty
man."
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.

Every man knows that crank is
some other fellow.
The man who is willing to help you
is usually unable to help himself
Some men come into the world ask
ing ''Vhy?" but no one is able to an
swer.
1t is a curious psychological fact
that man can be in a dozen different
minds.
Job when the boils arc on some other
fellow.
The politician absorbs lot of
liquids in order to make himself solid
with the boys.
Avoid abbreviations in writing-oth.
erwise you will get into the habit of
breaking your word.
Employees may not be meddlesome
yet they are always minding some.
body else's business.
Policemen should be successful
spectators; so many servant girls
lc. them in on the ground floor.
Death struggles are hard, but they
are nothing in comparison with the
struggles Of some people to live.
Don't snub man because he looks
green. A watermelon has a similar
look, but it is usually all right al
heart.
When some men talk, others are
apt to regret that automatic ear
closers have not yet been placed upon
the market.
Time fies-but you cant make the
man believe it who is compelled tc
wait five hours for train at coun.
try station.-Chicago News.
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
TRUE SAYINGS.

A soul occupied with great ideas
best performs small duties.-H. Mar
tineau.
Labor is the great producer of
wealth; it moves all other causes
Daniel Webster.
The man that never makes a mis-
take is the man that never does any.
thing.-Theodore Roosevelt.
Cheerfulness is an excellent wear
ing quality. 1t has been called the
bright weather of the heart.-Samuel
Smiles.
Difficulties are Gods errands; and
when we are sent upon them we
should esteem it proof of Gods con-
fidence.-H. w. Beecher.
The ills of life are sufficiently hard
to bear, without adding to them the
wear and tear of discomfort and re-
bellion-EliZabeth Cady Stanton.
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
WIT AND WISDOM.

A melancholy twang is the sure sign
of love.
Give the green motorman a chance
to kill somebody.
To be smart and clever without be-
Ing tricky is an art.
A better half sometimes proves q
disappointing old counterfeit.
Never look like a bargain counter
after the pick of the remnants is gone.
Happiness is the greatest of tonics-
the best of cosmetics-and the envy
of dyspeptics.
You can view life through either
stained glass windows or an old piece
of smoked glass.
A mule or woman could never be
happy unless they could kick about
something or other.
A woman's vanity fiatters her into
the belief that she is beloved, but a
mans logic needs be convinced.
Old age would be bereft of a gener-
GUS share of it's comforts if it could
not boast of when II was young"
A man has boundless respect for
the woman who hates him, but he
wishes he knew what she was going
to do about it,
The faces of some women are so set
and expressionless that they look as
if a good, broad smile would crack the
whole business into bits.
When I note the meanness and lack
of gratitude of some people take off
my hat to the most onery NANCY cur
that tramps with a hobo.-Kate Thy
son Mari.
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
A FEW THOUGHTS.

A sure way to beat the professional
gambler: Don't play.
Men get gray before they die; wom-
en- dye before they get gray.
A cold in the head is not nearly so
bad as q frost in the house of your
beloved.
A garment isn't necessarily becom-
ing because it comes high. Look at
the Scotchmans kilt.
A man is justified in going to but
one place where he would not take his
wife; but some men shave themselves
A girl is justifable in lying about
her age; but not in lying about the
house while her mother does the
dishes.
1t takes a weight of 4,500 pounds to
crush cubic inch Of the best brick.
But an ordinary everyday darn fool
cannot be crushed. Don't be a fool:
be brick.
Charity covereth a multitude of
SINS" but only charity Of your own
make will suffice for your own sins.
Your friends need all the covering
they can scrape together for thrir
owr.
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24

-Blessid IL thee mann whOO ix In jale,
for hee don't half too pay for cole.
Blessid liz thee woman wh0o kan
krie ezy, for verille shee alwaiz getts
what shee goze after.
Blessid IL thee skrawny tirkie. for
hee IL likely mott to bee killed for
Thanksgiving dinnur.
Blessid IL thee mann whoo haz a
muther-inn-law, for hee will newer
fined life momonotous.
Blessid IL thee mann with balled
he'd, for hee don't knead too waist no
thyme in comeing his hare.
Blessid IL thee smowl mann inn the
wintur thyme, az THAR IL mott SOW
much of hymn too gett cowld.
Blessid iz thee gurl whoo chuze
gumn, for when shee IL chewing gumn
shee IL mott chewing thee ragg.
Bleesid IL thee mann whoo haz long
whiskurs, for hee don't knead too
spend no mummy for knecktize.
Blessid il thee boy who katches hiz
big sistur setting onn hur feller'z
lapp, for verillie hee haz snap.
Blessid IL thee farmur for hee duz
not half too ride inn thee cabul kars
orr ask thee hawty konductur for
transfurZ.
Blessid il thee sitty mann, for ne
duz mott half too milk thee cows when
thee thurmommiter il away down be-
low zeerow.
Blessid H. thee mann whoo lives in
Chicago, for hee IL mitey lucky too
bee live when thar IL SOW mutch
dangur of heeing killed.
Bliessid il the man with red hare,
for hiz eers look warm whether they
bee orr nott.-Chicago Chronicle.
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
DERINGS.

Actions are crystallized thoughts.
Self-preservation is the first law of
politics.
A fact is an alarm clock which spoils
pleasant dreams.
In the union of limburger and beer
there is strength.
The sermon makes the pulpit; a
pure heart makes the altar.
1t needs but slight scratch of the
pen to turn pathos into bathos.
There is wonderful material be-
tween the lines of the youthful essay
Two wrongs don't make right, but
most of us have played at cancel
ing"
1t is now up to the doctors to dis
microbe.
Let we'll enough alone" is a good
motto, but is there anything well
enough?
There are boards made of wood and
wooden boards.
The minds of the people work slow
ly, but they work with considerable
thoroughness.
In the great trust drama Of the fu-
ture a corner in oxygen would give
the proper atmosphere.
There are more things done without
motive in this world than are dreamed
of by the police department.
The greatest of unconscious humor.
lists is the man who takes himself seri-
ously We are all, more or less, un-
conscious humorists.
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
TO GET INTO SOCIETY.

Never let a scandal occur in your
own family while there is scandal
anywhere else. Wait for dull period
and then spring it on the public.
Be friend to every newspaper man,
big, little, rich, poor, good, bad and
Indifferent. 1t pays.
Buy diamonds and pearls by the
peck. Your wife will do the rest.
Wait
Never live with your family long
enough in one place to contract
home atmosphere. Home is death to
society.
Be dull at dinners; they all do it.
Begin and saub those beneath you
as early in tho game as possible; your
progress upward will be indicated by
the number you can snub.
Rally around the divorce court.
Cultivate your enemies; they will
help you along
Don't be afraid Of being too vulgar;
it's a good lad.
Don't stint your women; they need
the money.
Feed everybody. To do this collect
cooks. A good cook is the corner.
stone Of social success.
Wait
Buy up church or so; it's a good
medium. Many woman has entered
the kingdom of society through a pew,
New York Herald
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
PASTORS SAY

The nation will always be just as
good and safe as the individual COM
posing it.-Rev. P. Barr, New Bed
ford, Mass.
The man who continues downward
only celebrates his own movement and
return becomes more and more diff
cult.-Rev. J. C. Smith, Indianapolis.
Ind.
The kind of life one leads even
leaves it's marks upon the outward
visage. The body we wear is self's
xternalization.-Rev. R. M. Black,
Episcopal, Brooklyn, N. Y.
The church is stronger to-day than
ever before, and what gives the
church it's present power is the fact
that it has proved to be the greatest
agency under God for the elevation of
the race.-Rev. c. ]. Hall, Denver,
Col.
1t is well to live for to-day, but
he who lives his best for to-day lives
also for eternity. Heredity is a fact
that reaches further than we think
A Christian father sends his religion
down to generations.-Rev. DR.. Bur-
rell, New York.
Make it your first business to be
right. to do right, to live according to
all the commandments of God, and
the question of material good will set
tie itself naturally The laws of God
have to do with the body, as we'll as
the soul, and make work as truly a
religious duty as prayer.-Rev. DR..
Raymond, Schnectady, N. Y.
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
ODD FACTS ABOUT LAPPS.

Rich and poor live in the same
kind of house.
They are the shortest race in the
world, averaging 4 feet and II inches
in height.
They are supposed to be Mongolians.
but whence they came is a mystery
no ethnologist has satisfactorily ex-
planned
They are the shortest-headed race
in the world, a Lapp skull measuring
less from top to bottom than the
skull of any other modern.
The Lapps have language of their
own, but linguists are not agreed as
to what it is. 1t has little Russian,
little Finnish, little Swedish in it.
No Lapp ever leaves Lapland No
Lapp ever aspires to make any depar-
ture from the Lapp method of living,
which is to-day just what it was J.
500 years ago.
be the only people in the world with
out taste for music and unable to
sing a song, but these beliefs con-
cerning them have been proven to
be not wholly correct.
The Lapps are Lutherans. Before
they embraced the Christian religion
they worshipped the sun, the moon
and the stars, and believed that hea
ven was just like this world, even tc
a man getting back in life all his
dead dogs.
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
MERE OPINION.

The way to succeed nowadays is to
have had success irst.
The modern theatrical hit must
have blush in every line.
The average man has a brother-in-
law in the insurance business.
Married women who are reformers
generally get the fever after the we'd
ding.
Most men are sorry for the poor fel-
low who succeeded in marrying his
first love.
There is always room at the top,
and somebody there who wants to oc.
cupy it all.
Dogs don't try to show off before
strangers. No wonder some people
prefer dogs to children.
Let us give Adam credit for one
thing. He didn't tip the waiter who
handed that apple 20 Eve.
The greatest man in the world is
probably wondering what he can do to-
morrow to keep up the bluff
Success is like the shadow a man
casts upon wall. When he tries to
look 1t in the face he can't see it.
Man is the only male animal that is
less gaudy than his female companion
but too often alas, he doesn't deserve
this distinction.
Real worth will crop out. but some
body else is likely to cut the CROP
Chicago Record Herald
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
RELIGIOUS THOUGHT.

There is only one standard Of right
and truth.-Rev. DR.. Vance, Episcopa-
lian, Brooklyn, N. Y.
There is one supreme light on the
fire of life; it is the light of eternity
Rev. DR.. West, Congregationalist,
Winona, MINI.
Society depends upon mutual hon
esty, begetting condolences between
man and man.-Rev. A. W. Hitchcock
Worcester, Mass.
The genesis Of the strife lies in
greed on the part of capital and the
lack Of consideration on the part of
labor.-Rev. G. E. Burns, Presbyter-
ian, Philadelphia, Pa.
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24

Blessed y tke in16eice q 0As tsues
loving human soul on smother
George Eliot.
Every thought which genius and pi-
ETY. throw into the world alters the
world.-Emerson.
We reap what we SOW; but Nature
has love over and above that Justice.
and gives us blossom and fruit that
spring from no planting Of ours
George Eliot
The great must submit to the do
minion of prudence and virtue, or
none will long submit to the dominion
of the great This is q feudal tenure
which they cannot alter.-Burke.
In the moral world there is nothing
impossible, If we can bring thorough
| will to it. Man can do everything with
himself, but he must not attempt to
do too much with 9th thers.-Humboldt.
To help the young soul, to add en-
ergy, inspire hope, and blow the Goals
| into a useful flame; to redeem defeat
by new thought and firm action, this,
| though not easy, is the work of divine
| men.-Emerson.
AC C0ACCI VI q cat Lle1u ACAAeAAAS
an enduring monument of human en-
ergy. The man dies and disappears.
but his thoughts and acts survive and
| leave an indelible stamp upon his race.
Samuel Smiles.
Every manner of living, each Of our
actions, has particular end in view.
and all these ends have general aim
happiness. 1t is not in the end, but
| in the choice of means that we de.
| ceive ourselves.-Aristotle.
| You cannot be buried in obscurity;
you are exposed upon a grand thea
ter to the view of the world. If your
| actions are upright and benevolent,
be assured they will augment your
power and happiness.-CyTus.
| No man or woman of the humblest
sort can really be strong, gentle and
pure and good, without the world be-
| ing better for it, without somebody
being helped and comforted by the
very existence of that goodness.-Phil
| lips Brooks.
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
ALL SORTS.

A dead desperate has more attrac-
ton for the crowd than live seer.
Canada has over 500 lobster Gamer
les in operation. Then there are som e
that are not canned.
There are not wanting those who
think that 1.-The peer of Napoleon" is
approaching his Waterloo.
It's the riskiness of matrimony that
makes it fascinating. We are all
gamblers at heart and take desperate
chances.
w. X. Vanderbilt has broken the
automobile record for a mile, but there
are automobilistS who have broken
more than that.
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
oUIPs.

It is the second taste that detects
the chestnut.
Ills and pills. We take one and then
the other. That's life.
Some of the hardest work is done
on the substitutes bench.
It takes salaried employe to real
ize that yesterdays work cuts no ice.
If all the knockers were boilermak-
ers the supply would exceed the de-
mand.
There are men who would find it as
hard to decline q verb as to decline a
drink.
Hopes are born in heaven, but often
tread the road that's paved with good
Intentions.
Obstacles were made to be removed
and with the strenuous every day is
moving day.
The German Emperor's present to
the United States bears a striking re-
semblance to Simon Tappertit.
Strong endeavor is never without
its reward. The frog that wished to
become bull became a bullfrog.
The crank on education is quite con-
vinced that that frog could have be-
come bull if it had but blown hard
enough.
Since there are not more than half
a dozen jokes in the world the fate
Of the chronic paragrapher is indeed
hard.
If you really think you are a guar
dian of the future, don't be unneces-
sarily offensive in the exercise of your
high calling.
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24

Hit's. = mighty. rood thing 1sr folks
what's always growlin' atl do world dat
Dc worlds too busy ter talk back Ct
'em.
Wen . man starts ter run fer once
hits most inginruly wild de idee dat
him en- de Lawd IL erbouA all dat kin
save de country.
What's the use in appintin mo- colo
nels in Georgia wen dem what we got
already amt got standin' room ter ad-
mire deysef in?
I don't lose no time studyin' bout
how fur OF heaven Is; but what kind
er race gwine ter make fer 1t Is
what bothers me.
We infer from the following ex-
tracts from rural exchanges that the
brisk October weather brings visions
of good times:
Farmer Jones laid fine, fat turkey
on our table last Wednesday. He has
fine turkey farm. He also has cows;
and we need milk and beefsteak.
The high sheriff and the mayor ran
race picking cotton last Monday
The sheriff beat the mayor 100 pounds,
whereupon the mayor cut him with q
razor.
There will be two candy pullings
and four weddings at the Widow
Jones next Tuesday evening. The
widow herself is looking spry these
crisp October days. She is no older
than she was ten years ago.
There will be high social dance at
the Widow Spriggins' on Thursday
night next. The last time we had one
of these high dances Spot Williams
kicked the shingles of the roof and let
the starlight in on the old Virginia
| reel.-Atlanta Constitution.
The Jennings daily record., 1902-12-24
ausps AND oll,Asasea

4.
No; rnbbsr &C whist and Z rubbsg
IN tho bald.headsd row are mot tha
same.
a nimble wit IL . good thing: but.
in time OF temptation, . nimble nit u
whole lot better.
What! Kicking because your wife's
bonnet cost $25? Let's see what was
1t your summers Panama cost you?
A great many people have not yet
donned their winter garb. Some tail
ors are SO terribly afraid they might
lose something.
Don't envy the doctor's wife; she is
always in deadly fear. when she has q
pain, that her husband is experiment.
ing with her liver.
Don't waste pity on those who are
disappointed In love. Think Of the
millions of poor devils who were dis
appointed in marriage.
Never ask a woman If she would
like to be young again; but win heI
everlasting regard by showing heI
that you consider her young now.
The suicide kills himself because he
thinks he is tired of the world. when in
reality the world is tired of him. The
world never gets tired Of sand; be
gritty!
Women have strange ideas as to
what constitutes humor. One read
the other day an account of how q
man had had his nose cut OF and she
lowered the paper and said, why
how funny"
Don't envy the comedian his ever
lasting jollity; it is but mask tc
hide the deadly fear at his heart that
some nasty newspaper man will prick
the bubble of his reputation with 8
little cold, sharp graphite.