Omaha daily bee., 1902-04-17
BITS OF WASHINGTON LIFE.
Scenes and Incidents Sketched on
the Spot.

Scenes and Incidents Sketched on
the Spot.
In the rooms occupied by the committee
on ways and means Of the house, Of which
Uncle Joe Cannon of Illinois is chairman,
there is a long table around which the
members gather when the committee is in
session. 1t takes up considerable space
and the corners are very pointed. The
other day a member rushed in hurriedly
and in endeavoring to execute a loop about
the table collided good and hard with one
Of these sharp corners. All that he said
was not taken down, as Il would burn the
record. He went limping into the adjoin-
ing room and asked Chairman Cannon why
the deuce he did not dispose OF that darned
table"-or words to that effect-and get
another with round corners.
WELL" remarked Uncle joe" shifting
his unlighted cigar to the westward corner
OF his mouth, 81 have been thinking of II
for some time and 1 believe I'll send 1t over
to the senate committee on ways and
means. Those fellows over there are ex-
perts on turning sharp corners"
A new member OF congress was very
anxious, according to the Washington Post,
to get upon the good side Of Superintendent
Smith Of the botanic gardens, 80 that some
flowers and potted plants might be sent
to his house. AS everyone knows, Smith is
a hne old ScetchmaA, who worships the
memory Of "Bobbie'' Burns. and has prob
ably the finest and most complete collec-
tion of editions Of Burns works In the
world.
When, therefore. the new member went
to Smith. he resolved to say something
which would please the lover OF Burns.
When he entered Smiths library. he looked
with interest uDon the books.
81 always did love Jimmie Burns poems"
remarked the new member. / never saw
such a fine collection OF his works. I think
Jimmie Burns was one of the greatest men
who ever lived"
himself no further. Jimmie Burnsi" he
exclaimed, angrily. Tommy Washington!
Sammy B~onaparte! Get QUIT"
And then the new member realized that
he had made a mistake.
A congressman noted for his zeal and
liberality in distributing garden seeds
where they might do some good. has re-
ceived a practical letter from a little girl
In his district asking for a few packages.
She says she is IL years old, and writes:
Howdy, Mr.. Congressman, p'ite as you
I wish you'd bundle up some seeds and
send 'em to me.
I'd like a lot OF large petunias, with colors
80 intense,
To decorate the pathway from the doorway
to the fence.
Send around some Cobaca scandens to make
the window gay,
And perhaps we'd start a patch of double
zinnias right away.
We ought to nave some ~hoIlyhocks to help
things out a bit,
And Japanese chrysanthemum ms would
surely make a hit.
And III vote for you right freely and rise
up and declare
That this %country's agriculture is a mighty
fine affair.
Every time a congressman arises in the
house nowadays and asks for an indefinite
leave Of absence because Of important
business" significant smiles are exchanged
among the members who have their nomina-
tions nailed down and clinched. At this
season of the year. when the congressional
conventions are being held, important
business" almost invariably means the
congressman who has It also has trouble
In his district which Is sufficiently serious
to make his presence on the ground impera-
tive.
Another poor fellow in Distress whis-
pers Clerk Mckee to the speaker, and the
latter gives a good-luck-to you Affirmative
nod to the petitioning member. whs goes
away happy,