Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1902-01-10
LIE I OST PURSE.

theater the other night and were 90 de
Ipressed BY the play ct was an unmusi-
cal comedy that they felt called upon,
tout of respect to their mental attitudes,
to go to restaurant and eat lobster and
things. Being greatly cheered By the
results obtained therefrom, they started
nome na happy frame Of mind and duly
alighted at the thoroughfare on which the
Jimson Apartment is situated.
Jimson was about to insert the key in
the keyhole when Mrs. Jimson said, con-
tidently, but with feminine foresight:
/ have my purse, of course, Jim
ME 2? ?',fss .' :. -:
IT suppose so,' said Jimson, struggling
j with the key and knowing that he always
had the purse when there was nothing in
| it.. &.yG. s;..5 -.
Because if you Haven't it, 1 haven't"
continued Mrs Unison, sweetly. r..
Great Scott" cried Jimson, dropping
tae key, was there anything in it?
haven't got it,
.'.Let,s,esee," said Mrs. Jimson; "there
| was the recipe for the grape and grass
Blanks; there was the bill from the butch
1--er's, two nickels for carfafe, the cards for
7 Alioe'sswedding, the" nv
I u, was there any money in that purse?
Consarnsst * salau recipe!"
| MOI cyl replied Mrs. Unison. ssNone
but that ten dollars you gave me this morn
ling" - :
We'll" said Unison, modified by~this
tribute to his generosity, although lie
knew exactly what it meant. What are
we going to do? Of course, don t mind the
ten dollars, but the salad recipe! So in
Fstructive,. don't you know Reminds one of
1Nebuchadnezzar. Hadn't I better get
1Elt! just throw your massive mind back
over the events of the evening and try
1 Ito remember. We were at the theater.
tyou KNOW" he added, encouragingly.
WELL, Mrs. Jimson unused, reflective
Fly, entirely oblivious of the cold they might
get standing in the chill air, Eat the theater
we sat in row j, didn't me?'
whats that got to do with your purse?
How do l know where we sat? On the
whole added Jimson, II guess we did sit
in the jay row-at least you did" y,
How could I sit where you didn't"
asked. Mrs. Jimson, innocently. "Jimson!
land Jimson quailed) think your poor wit
is out of place on such an occasion. I know
L was born in Schoharie county, but that
doesn't mean that I'm hayseed or Jay,
| either. II you were man you wouldn't al
ways be casting it up at me. I'll buy the
theater tickets after this, and you'll find
yourself back in z, where you can't see the
ballet!" "
! "Pll be nearer the between-the-actsd door
anyway, said Jimmie to himself, and then
aloud II know I'm an ass, SO forgive me,
and tell me what row j has to do with the
purse"
Just this. The Wigwags, you re-
member, sat right behind us, and Mrs.
Wigway was complaining because they
were in K. Then when we came out
shook hands with her and had to change
something from my right hand to my
left in order to do it. That must have
been my purse. There!" she exclaimed, tri-
umphantly, "now don't you see the connec-
ton between row J and the purse?"
Certainly" said Jimson. RI always did.
I just wanted to hear you explain it in your
lucid way. My dear, you ought to be in q
school of logic. Now will you further shed
light on the present whereabouts of the
(purse?"'s ~ ~ '-'+.~. .''.... II
Elbow silly you men. are said Mrs. j Jill iii.
son, flushed with pride Cant you see?
In the restaurant, of course. All you've got
to do. is to: 60. down there and that nice,
smooth-shaven waiter who served us will
give it to you.''
my DEAR" said Unison, II know that
waiter. He does not come from Schoharie.
ne comes from Tenderloin county. He has
that ten dollars now in the innermost
pocket, and is preparing to spend it to-mor-
row for toys for the children-or other
things"
''That's the way with you men," replied
Mrs. Jimson. "Always considering other
men dishonest. Jimmie, please 20 down
and do as say. You'll find the purse,
surely"
Jimson went, and Mrs. Unison climbed
to their department. When he reached
the restaurant he went to the head
waiter.
will you kindly give me my purse ?'' he
said.
''What purse?" said that functionary,
| with some SURPRISE
why, the purse my wife left here an
hour ago, when we had finished supper"
"What sort of purse was it," asked the
head waiter.
"Why, lady's purse" said Unison, i'm.
patiently; Don't you know lady's purse
when you see it? Well, this was lady's
purse. Give it to me, please"
MY uedF SIT, SAID the waiter, we have
many ladies' purses left here. What was
this like? Black, blue, green? Did it have
any initials on it,"
"Oh!'' cried Unison, with satisfaction
'Initials? Thousands three, anyway
x. Y. -. and then for the life of him Jim
son couldn't remember his own name The
head waiter eyed him suspiciously, and lit.
tie crowd of belated guests gathered around
eyes" said the head waiter, suavely;
X. Y? What is the other-eh?"
"Hang the initials!" shouted Jimson;
"the purse was lost here, and some rascally
water has it. There's the man now who
waited on me. Ask him."
The head waiter summoned the man.
| IT found no purse" he said. "I'm moi
even sure that I served the gentleman
| What did the gentleman .have?"
'*Lobsters," said Jimson.
'"1 thought so,' said the head waiter, t'but
we aren't"
It didn't occur to Jimson's mind what
he meant until the next day. But a dire.
full thing for Jimson happened right then