davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16
THE MAN WHO LOVES A JOKE.
Though his pedigree be painted

Though his pedigree be painted
'Scutcheonless OF prince or peer,
Though he boast no kinship sainted
Stretching stately in his rear,
Though his funds be low and slender,
Like OF clothes and coinage broke,
All my scruples ! surrender
To the man who loves a joke.
Mark not his lore nor living,
Count / not his tongue or creed,
Sin and shadow all forgiving,
Bow | gladly to his need,
Friends and fathers ranged before me,
Clodded head and heart OF oak,
| will give them all that bore me,
For one man who loves joke.
Flaunt his banners fore and after.
Count his battles lost and won,
Kindly connoisseur Of laughter,
Just philosopher of fun,
Lighter shall beat the breaker,
Lighter rest the human yoke,
On the happy copartaker
WIN the man WIN loNts JUNE
Brother to the world around him,
Fellow with the clod and clay,
High and low alike shall sound him
For the comfort Of their way;
Sharer OF lifes joy and sorrow,
Bearer of the erring stroke,
Hopeful of the fairer morrow,
Lives the man who loves a joke.
Clearer eyed and broader builded,
Kindlier toward his human kind,
Vision keen nor fancygilded,
Open heart with open mind,
Self-esteeming, yet denying,
Severed from the selfish cloak,
| will spend my life relying
On the man who loves joke.
Minneapolis Times,
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16
AS TO BLuSHING.

Not every one would consider that
10 blush indicates special intelligence,
yet blushing is an eminently human
attribute, and Darwin says that ut
wGuld require an overwhelming
amount of evidence to make us believe
that any animal could blush. Idiots,
too, rarely blush" 1t is fact that
the nerves have an erect even on the
circulation of the blood and the very
pulse at our wrist is not due only to
the heart throbs. but to an organism
called the vaso.motor system-threao
like nerves distributed to the walls Of
lite blood vessels and making a regu.
lar pulsing motion as they force the
blood along. These blood vessels are
related closely both to the cerebro
spinal and the sympathetic system,
hence the reason for the effect Of sud.
den shock, of the pallor produced by
fear. the crimson blush of shame. and
The flush OF rage. These are really
psycho-phcnomena, and indicate the
remarkable vascular changes caused
by feelings of the mind. Blushing
reilly is a sort of momentary paralysis
or suspension OF the vaso-motot nerve
Influence, and the opposite emotion OF
fear either stimulates the contractors
of the Tiny capillary vessels or some
times permits their action by suspend
ing the cerebral influence.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16
HIS FAITH.

Passengers in an uptown car one aft
ernoon recently were very much en-
tertained and amused by a discussion
of things spiritual by two colored pas,
sengers. AS the debate waxed warm
err, the voices of the debaters grew
louder until what was said was plainly
audible to all in the car. After each
had made a confession OF faith and
given his views of the means whereby
mortal man could gain salvation, one
Of the pair blurted out, in a tone that
implied that all his hope for the next
world was embodied In the words;
We'll, sab, | b'lieve dat what's
gwine to be Is sholy gwine to be-"
HUH" grunted his companion, con-
temptuously. Den yo' blieves in pre-
meditashun. baltimore Sun.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16
THE oLp.FAsHloNEo SWING.

A sensible mother said one day. in
discussing the methods she had fol.
lowed in bringing up her children,
that the old-fashioned swing would
give a growing boy all the gymnastic
exercise he needed. She might have
added that II was equally good for
small, growing girls.
This device, one of the simplest
.lnd least expensive known to man.
has almost gone out OF fashion for
children. Anybody who was brought
up in a country village where the
swing was as much a part of the rurni.
.urC Of the yard as was the front door.
step, knows what a delight 1t was to
-hildron Of all ages and sizes. To one
Who possesses these memories the
modern apology for a swing. with its
Battle-Ground seat and ugly framework,
Is positively painful. Where Is the
| chance for exercise in that machine ?
What child old enough to have a mind
Of It's own wants to get into a cradle
and be swung back and forth by q
nurse?
The old.fashioned swing was rope
hung in long loop. with a notchet
board placed in the loop, and the
child could sit or stand. according t.
age and ability. Expert youngsters
could Swing standing up" until thu
rope was nearly horizontal, tn,
weight of the body holding II taut, 81
that the danger Of accidents wal
practically non.eXistent. The fall
which children have had from swing
were, in nine cases out of ten. the re
suit of scuffling or malicious pushing
and not of the amusement itself. I
X one of those amusements whicl
look a good deal more dangerous
tan they are. In acquiring momen
tim every muscle is brought int,
play. and the hands and arms ar,
strengthened gradually. without strain
so that ell the benefits of athletic
training are secured. together with rec
restion, and that is always goot
point to make with children.
|
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16
WANTS
For Want Column See Page Six
A NERvE.RAcKINe EXPERIENCE

According to Harper's Weekly, the
Marx family, of Brooklyn. has sold the
property in Westmoreland County.
Va, where Herbert Marx was living
when. on December Sd, he had such
an astonishing experience with his
neighbors. He seems that about 3
q 'clock in the evening, as he was sit
ting alone in one of two large rooms
on the lower floor of his house, reading
q magazine by the light Of lamp,
pane of glass crashed at the other end
of the room, gun.barrel came through
and a voice invited him to throw up
his hands. Back Of the gun he saw
head, the face hid by black mask
Marx Jumped. called out something
dashed for the five-shooter under the
pillow of his bed across the room, and
retired with 1t into the back room
where there was no light. AS he pass.
ed his table another gun.barrel came
through another window near II, and
another head appeared, the face mask
ed in white. AS he dashed into the
back room, a third man, gun in hand.
came crashing through a window close
upon him. Marx knocked his gun up
and fired his own pistol, not stopping
to raise II. The man fell. Marx made
for the door. II burst in. and fourth
man met him. Marx fired again. and
the fourth man fell back on the porch
Marx dashed out and made for the
gate. The night was dark. and he
brought up against the fence so hard
that he was thrown back several feet
Right in front Of him rose another man
with a gun. Marx lodged, and scram'
bled over the fence. The man follow.
ed. Marx fired. The man fell. Marx
ran on and hid in the orchard. Pres
emily, getting his breath, he started
for his nearest neighbor.
Relating that he had been attacked
by burglars, he got two men, lanterns
and a gun, and came back to investi
gate. They found William Taylor
dead by the fence, ]. Q. Stiff lying on
his back In the house. and William
Heflin on his face by Stiff's side. AL
the men were familIar acquaintance:
of Marx, the latter two, especially. be
ing his friends. These two we're alive
What could be done for them wa!
oo'tolb "tlt uH'
they were sent presently by boat 10 {
hospital in Washington. Near thu
house were found two buggies, tn,
horses hitched and blanketed, and II
the buggies were found a gallon o
kerosene, some tar, bag OF rag
soaked in kerosene, twenty feet O
rope, and a long whip. The explana
ton, since given by Stiff in the hosp
tai, is that Marx had been accused o
insulting a girl, and that his youn
friends undertook to discipline him
Two of them are dead, and a thirt
may get partly we'll. Two others
Thompson and Douglas, are in urgen
request.
Marx appeared before a coroner
Jury. and being exonerated, wen
North to rest his nerves and Is nov
in Brooklyn. He is described as a ST.
dious, mild.mannered young man c
twenty.one, who had overtaxed hi
strength in studying for the bar, an
went to the farm In Virginia, whic
has family had long owned, to rest an
regain his health.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16
SHIP ALSTERS(HWAN
MAKES LONG VOYAGE
FROM GERMAN PORT
Head Winds Held Her Back Put
Back 10 Hamburg 10 Change
Captains Cargo Of
Cement.

With her tall, white masts and black
yards the big steed German ship Alster-
schwan, Captain Erdman, presents a
striking appearance as she lies at the
1rmgard wharf. making read to dis
charge large cargo of cement from the
odd world"
After a long voyage of 1863 days, 100
OF which we're spent in the Pacific
ocean. the handsome windjammer ar
rived safely in this port yesterday af-
ternoon from Hamburg. She has near
ly 1000 barrels of cement, consigned
to order. The Alsterschwan showed
up just in time to dispel an anxiety
which had commenced to grow In the
minds of some of those interested in in
her safe arrival. She was beginning to
be spoken Of as far behind time. Rough
weather and head winds, however, were
responsible for the vessels long pas
sage from Europe. From Hamburg to
Cape Horn the voyage was fairly
good one. forty-three days being con-
sumed. After rounding the Horn the
Alsterschwan had little of anything but
head winds all the way to port. Sew
eral sails were carried away in a gale
running the eastern down. but beyond
this no accident occurred of any con-
sequence.
over a week ago the Alsterschwan
was of the island of Molokai, attempt
ing to make Honolulu. On Friday last
this island was sighted. Even when
/ Honolulu was in sight the good shiI
found 1t impossible to get closer thar
twenty miles. The tug Fearless wen
out to meet her yesterday morning, at
ter taking the bark Mohican to sea.
Captain Giertz was in command o
the Alsterschwan when she left Ham
burg. He became Ill when the ship wa
three days out however. and II wa
necessary to put back for medical treat
ment. This delayed the vessel a week
Captain Erdman succeeded Captain
, GiertZ.
, Though this is the first visit of tn
Alsterschwan 10 Honolulu, her presen
commander has been here severa
times. having many friends here. Tn
ship carries crew of twenty-eigh
men. She is a vessel OF 2309 tons ant
, now that the Dirigo has sailed,
easily the finest ship in the harbor.
Below the water line the Alster
schwan is foul with barnacles. Thi
, fact alone had little to do with tn
vessels delay toward the end of tn
voyage, as the barnacles became NOR
: numerous. As much as is possible
with the ship in the water, this disad
vantage will be remedied while the Al
sterschwan is in this port. Capital
Erdman expects to be in port abou
three weeks.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16
HOW IT HAPPENED.

1T was kinder funny-that is, over
looking the seriousness Of IT," said the
landlord OF the Pettyville tavern. You
see, Miss Gabrielle Lanks, who has
not meanin' any disrespect to her. you
understand-been an old maid so long
that it's generally believed to be chron.
lc, approached the railroad crossin'
and brakeman waved red flag at her
to warn her OF the danger. She thought
he was Tyin' to fiirt with her, and ad'
vanced toward him with a smile; ant
o caboose that was backin' up STRUCK
her good and plenty. Luckily, no bonei
were broken; and the first thing sht
said when she recovered consciousness
was:
"'oh. this is so Apart
Smart Set.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16
THINGS HAVE CHANGED.

Politics hez changed nightly in dis
country said the old.time colored yo.
ter. Hits all diffunt now FUN what
hit use lei be-"
you think so?"
Il knows SO! wy, de time wus wen
Marse Bill would make up his min dat
he wanted office, en- he'd shoulder
his shotgun en- walk right in de middle
err de crowd, en- say:
boys, OATS de office yander amt
It"
YES dey'd make answer, dat sho
Is it,
"'Well, I'm done lected ter dat of
nee; amt ~
En- dey d all speak up, ez one man
'Cose You is lected ter it! Go loni
in dar, en- hang yo hat up, en- shet d,
dol What you stanin' roun' heah fer
anyhow Go long in, whar' yo' B.
long!"-Atlanta Constitution.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16
HE UNDERSTOOD.

The other day lady was driving
her husband down a narrow country
lane, when, on suddenly turning a
sharp corner, they encountered q
brewers van. There was no room to
pass, and the lady said, very tartly:
you must go back. for ! shall not.
You ought to have seen us before en-.
teIing the lane"
But, my dear" demonstrated her
husband mildly, the man couldn't see
rNnnd the corner"
81 don't care" was the characters
tic reply. "Ill sit here till doomsday
before | give way to that man"
The carter. who had overheard the
colloquy. here remarked cheerfully:
"All right, guv'nor, Til back out Of
this" adding confidentially, 1--WE gol
such another one at home."-Tit.Bits
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16
SONG OF THE PATH.

Just until the May snow comes,
Seeming all the sweet spring day,
Let US walk together, dear,
Hand in hand, little way.
Just until the May snow falls
In the still fields, let us meet;
Let me walk and know you near,
Shadowy through the petals, sweet.
Just until the June flowers blow
All, It's such little while!-
Let my heart delight to beat
To the music OF your smile.
Till the harvest moon-till then
Let us stay. When poppies die,
Crushed and crimson in the corn,
We can bear to say goodbye.
Love, my love, the year is done,
Wreck Of golden hours and days
Nowhere in the path we took
Is there parting OF the ways
-Zona Gale in May Smart Sc
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16
UNSURPASSED.

Sir Henry Irving, after the play one
evening recently, told of an inebriated
American who was boasting to party
of friends in a London hotel about the
commanding position his country had
taken In the worlds affairs in recent
years and the superiority OF all things
American.
There's one thing, though, that
you'll admit, am sure" demonstrated
one Of the Englishmen, in which this
country surpasses America.
What is it," was the aggressive re-
ply.
Fog! You never saw on the OTTER
side of the Atlantic any fog that could
match the one which hangs over Lon
don tonight"
Fog! Fog!" came the hesitating
befogged reply; but the hesitation only
lasted a moment, and was followed by
a still more aggressive tone and man
ner, as the irate American cried:
why. this is nothing compared will
some Of the fogs we have around New
York ha.bor. Sometimes the fog Il
so thick around there that iTs a com
mon thug for the captains of the ferr,
boats to put on extra crews simply q
pump the fog out OF the cabins. Why
there's / corporation organizing II
New Jersey right now to can American
fog and supply the British people witt
the real thing'."-New York Times.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16
THE CHEAT.

Love and threw dice one day;
Love threw cinque and threw tray;
Loaded dice!" straightway cried;
All my protests were denied.
Love, in spite of all | said,
Pocketed the stakes, and fed.
Useless further to complain
I had lost my heart again.
And the play was false, tits true.
All, | wonder II he knew
With what intricate device
| myself had cogged the dice!
Frank L. Pollock in May Smart Sci
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16
ARRIVED.

Sunday, June Is.
Str. W. G. Hall, S. Thompson, from
Kauai ports, at 4 a. m. with sugar and
passengers.
Str. Maui. Bennett. from Hawaii
and Maui ports, at a. m, with freight
and passengers.
Ger. sp. Alsterschwan, Erdman. 1853
days from Hamburg, at p. M, with
1880 barrels of cement.
Monday, June 1d.
Am. bk. s. c. Allen. George John
son, II days from San Francisco. at
noon. with general merchandise and Al
bead OF stock on deck.
DEPARTED.
Sunday, June 10.
Am. blk. Mohican, Kelly, for San
Francisco, with sugar.
SAILING TODAY.
Stmr. Lehua. Naopala, for Molokat
ports at p, m.
Stmr. James Makee. Tullett, for IA
paa. Kilauea, Kalihiwai and Hanale
at p. IN,
Stmr. lwalani, for Anahola, at
| p. m.
SAILING TOMORROW.
Stmr Kinau. Freeman, for Hilo anC
way ports. at noon.
Stmr Mauna Loa, Simerson. for Ha
wall and Maui ports, at noon.
Stmr. w. G.. Hall, S. Thompson, TO
Kauai ports. at p. IN.
Stmr. Maui, Bennett, for Maui ports
at p. m.
Stmr. Noeau. Mosher, for Lahaina
Kaunakakai, Honokaa and Kukuihaele
at > p. m.
PASSENGERS ARRIVED.
From Kauai ports, per str. w. G
Hall, June lbs. II. Mahelona, Maste
Allen Mahelona, J. A. Tuthill, Mrs. Z
w. Holdsworth. Miss Katie Scharsch
Miss Hattie Deinert, Capt. Mcleod, {
Uynma and wife, NJ. NJ. Aida and wife
n. Whitney, so japanese and IL Chi
nese.
From Maui ports, per str. Maui, Jun
l5-Mrs. II. b. Bailey, Miss A. Reuter-
r. Slaughter. A. c. Alexander, Enoc
Johnson, S. X. Akana, w. G. Ogg, {
Duisenberg, J. C. Ridgway. j. S. "
Zumwalt, wife and four children, I
McCorriston and wife, w. J. Dyer an
II deck.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16

Weather Bureau. Punahou, June 16.
Temperature - Morning minimum,
20: Midday maximum. 81.
Barometer at a. m. 29.9S. Steady.
Rainfall 0.0l.
Dew Point 70F.
Humidity at Q a. m. II per cent.
Diamond Head Signal Station. Juno
l6.--Weather cloudy; wind light Sc.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16

For a consideration a company has
just been formed in France to relieve
Parliamentary candidates of all the
worries of a general election. Posters.
agents, orators, audlences-all are to
be found. Voters, however are not
supplied, but II the candidate is not
elected, the company guarantees to re.
turn a third OF whatever he may have
paid to secure his return.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16

Mrs. Susan Lazelle Revere Sampson
died recently at the residence OF her
sister, Mrs. Stats S. Morris, of East
Orange, at the age oil So, She was a
Igreat-granddaughte of Paul Revere.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16

G, s. McKenzie's string of horses
will be sent to Hilo tomorrow and
Weller will go down in the Klnau the
week following.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16

II is reported that o'Rourke has sold
Carter Harrison and that this animal
will be given special training for the
Maui races.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16

Since 1879 France has spent $780,
100000 on canals, and there are new
schemes involving an expenditure OF
500, 900, 900 more.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16
TIDES.

First quarter Of the moon June T.
1924 p. m.
Tides from the United States Coas
and Geodetic Survey Tables.
The tides at Kahului and Hilo occu
about an hour earlier Than at He
nolulu.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16
THE MOON AND THE CITY.

] do not wonder, pale nun Of the skies,
Above the serried roof-tops looking
down,
That thou in clouds shouldst strive to
veil thine eyes,
And shut from out thy sight the tin
seled town!
For Crime now creeps from out its
gloomy lair,
Seeking, where'er 1t may, its evil aim,
And down the street and through the
crowded square
In her bedizened arrogance walks
Shame!
Clinton Scollard in April Smart Set,
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16

The consideration paid for Wayboy
by G. s. Mckenzie is supposed to be
$500.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16

Sallie Raitus-How many languages
do you speak, Polly?
Polly Glotte-Eight. When ! tackl-
ed the ninth saw my finish.
Sallie-What was II?
Polly-Finnlsh.- Smart Set.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16

Send the weekly edition Of the BuI,
letIn to your friends. Only 81 a year.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16
The HARD TIMES
PLEADED In COURT

CONTINUED from page ~
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16
JAS. F. MORGAN.
AuCTioNEER
TRUSTEES SALE
IN BANKRUPTCY
ON SATURDAY, JUNE 18th
AT IL O'CLOCK NOON, 4

At my salesroom, 65 Queen street, VI
will sell at Public Auction, by order OF
Mr.. Daniel Logan Trustee for the Aus
tin Publishing Co., Ltd, bankrupt.
the entire plant of the Austin Publish
ing Co. The stock consists or paper,
a very large and splendid stock OF Job
type; sufficient body type for two
large weekly newspapers. also large
stock OF artistic and up-to-date type.
some of which has hardly seen ink.
Also all the presses, tools, instru'
ments, shafting, pulleys, betting, office
desks, ETC., etc.
The sale will also carry with 1t the
name and good will Of the Paradise
of the Pacific"
In case of the non-disposal Of the
stock as a whole, the sale will be
transferred to the premises OF the
Austin Publishing Co., and VIII be held
on the same day
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1902-06-16
FURNITURE FOR SALE
and HOUSE FOR RENT

have for sale the absolutely com.
plete furnishings Of 5-room hand
somely furnished cottage, and cottage
for rent. Centrally located, with reas-
enable rent; electric lights, mosquito
proof.
The Redwood gazette., 1902-06-11

Venetian cloth. They will be at
home in the Goodrich residence
after July 1st, Mr.. and Mrs. Good
rich having decided to spend the
summer on their farm in northern
Minnesota, and turning their resi-
dence over to the children.
Mr.. Jones is one Of the most pop
ular agents on the St. Louis sys-
tenn. It has been largely through
his efforts that his company has
succeeded in keeping down the
Redwood Falls feeling against pa
tronizing that system, and securing
fair share of the freight traffic Of
this city AS a rustler for business
both freight and passenger, he has
no superiors, and in a social as we'll
as business sense, Mr.. Jones al
ways makes friends. The bride is
likewise popular with all who know
her. A Redwood girl, possessing
charming manners, she has won a
large circle of friends which size
now enjoys.
The Redwood gazette., 1902-06-11
Why Not Go West

Special summer excursion rates from
all points on the Minneapolis & ST..
Louis R. K. to Denver, Colorado
Springs, Pueblo, Salt Lake City, Ogden
and Hot Springs, Deadwood, Lead and
Custer. in the Black Hills, S. D. On
June % to "a, July to l3. Aug. to IA,
%, "a. 80 and 81. and Sept. to TO-
special low rate of less than one way
fare for round trip is offered to above
points. On June to 2l, 25 to 80, July
IA to 81, Aug. Is to %, 25 to 20, and
Sept Ii to Is, special low rate of one
fare plus 81 for round trip to above
points is offered. Stop-over will be
granted and final limit of tickets is
Oct. 81, 1902. For further information
call OH local ticket agent or address A.
B. Cults, G. P. & T. A. Minneapolis,
MINI. 42-St.
The Redwood gazette., 1902-06-11

something wonderful, fully 500
people being unable to gain ad-
mittance. 1t is truly a great show.
Daily Republic, Barab Wis.
Gollmar Bros circus now united
with Schumans bi-continent menag-
erie arrived from Omro early Sun
day morning and quietly put UP its
vloth house during the day The
parade took place at 1870 a. m. to-
day and all about the parade and
show indicates that a year made
good improvements in the Gollmar
show. They had a full house this
afternoon and tonight it will un-
doubtedly be full again. Go and
see the animals and incidentally
take in the circus. Evening Jour
nal,, Berlin, Wis.