The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-10-05

"Stop thief" s1e
"Shoot him!"
Lynch hint"
Hatless, coatless, breathless, the
painting, hunted fugitive tore madly
through the myraid of trucks and drays
which damned the crowded thorough
fare.
Grim-faced men, excited boys and
frenzied women surged behind him. For
the moment these respectable persons
Of respectable community were trans
formed into savages
A stranger appeared among them,
drawn into the swirling cyclonic mass
Of humanity by the very force of it's
progress through the atmosphere.
What has the miscreant done?" he
asked.
Wretch, he must die" chorused
those whose shoulders grazed with his.
Thief he is and death shall be visited
upon him. He broke window and
grabbed it and
"Only a poor fellow that has robbed
a jewelry store!" exclaimed the cos
mopolite, confession delineated on his
countenance.
why pursue so savagely poor
beggar who only purloined a diamond
from the rich? Perhaps his children
are starving. His wife"
Diamond! diamond" shrieked the
mob in derision. "He swiped a chunk
of coal! What do we want with the
law upon him?
ave Want the Coal"
Two of the furious pursuers too weak
to continue the mad chase, dropped to
the granite and were trampled upon by
the relentless, selfish mob. Tattered,
battered and torn they arose laborious-
1y together on the principle of a jack
knife bridge. Tottering, they leaned
one upon the other. Tears Streamed
down the furrowed cheek of each.
"Alas," moaned one, that am not
physical culture man."
What Sadness" lamented the other,
Ito think we are so weak"
"But was it real?"
eyes. Outlines have I seen it and
looked upon it with envious eyes as
l passed 1t there In the window. 1t is
the real thing. I know the spurious
because once in the Smithsonian in
stitute at Washington I was allowed
to examine a piece of real anthracite.
Never shall I forget it's beauty-its
ineffable blackness-its-"
"Stop!" cried the other, you only
aggravate my anguish"
"Well," sighed the other, "all hope
Is indeed lost. This morning my wife
sawed UP the last chair"
"And we cooked breakfast over the
remnants of the $500 sideboard."
eff worse comes to worst" quoth the
first sufferer, II still have safety de-
post box full of nice, dry government
bonds"
ooh, misery" cried the other, that
reminds me- To think that only yes
terday my stock in the P. D. @. railroad
was watered."
When they were released from the
detention hospital these two citizens
started out to trade the savings Of a
lifetime, their homes, their future
hopes and prospects and their interests
In the hereafter if necessary for a
ton or two Of hard coal, but they had
a hard time Of 1t.
Produces New Form of Suicide.
They learned that Chief of Police
O'Connor had sent out a scout in the
person Of a detective, with instruc-
lions to obtain some coal, no matter
what might be the cost in life or
money Casualties-three coal dealers
and four anthraciticides, who, when
found with coal in their possession,
swallowed the precious stuff rather
than have it confscated, and died from
too free indulgence in delicacies.
An old miser was found with fully
four pounds of the valuable article, but
his attempt to swallow it all only gave
him the govt.
They assaulted a sidewalk at mid