davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01
OWNING ROD DEFENDED.

Sir Thomas Brunton, of St. Barthol-
omew's hospital, has lately been con-
Quoting some experiments to deter
mine whether or not the divining rod
has any possible claim to considera-
ton as a scientific instrument, and
his conclusion is that it has. So the
man who travels around the country
locating wells for the farmers. and
who has generally been esteemed
fraud, finds champion in an unex-
pected quarter.
Sir Thomas Brunton says that when
the divining rod dips toward the earth
above vein of water it merely rem
ders visible the involuntary muscular
action produced in the experimenter
by the influence of water. Many del
icately organized persons feel the ap-
proach Of thunder storm long before
it arrives. Meteorological changes
might easily be foretold by the move
ments of an instrument constructed
and adjusted to record the muscular
agitation resulting from the imi-
nence of such changes. This would
be thoroughly scientific application
of the principle of the divining rod.
Sir Thomas thinks that, as the
camel can unerringly detect the exis-
tence of water at distance of miles,
the human organism may reasonably
be supposed to be able to detect it in
voluntarily few feet away, and to
impress the fact on the divining rod.
The effect of the proximity of water
on the sensory nerve fbers Of hui
man being is no stronger than the
cracking Of chairs and tables under
the influence of moisture.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01
TEACHERS ORTHOGRAPHY.

Recently it was announced that
several members of the graduating
class of Northwestern University
(near Chicago) had been "plucked"
for bad spelling. They were able to
make a creditable showing in other
branches, but their orthography was
too defective for graduates. The pro-
fessor of English began a reform by
sending the young men and women
to their spelling books and by inves-
tigating the causes of the inability of
the present generation to rival their
ancestors as spoilers. He has report
ed that the system of teaching orthog-
raphy which is now in operation in
the public schools of Chicago and
many other cities cannot produce good
spoilers. Not only are the syllables
no longer divided, but oral spelling
has been abandoned, while there is
not enough reading to educate the
sight. He has predicted that unless
there shall be a return to the old
methods bad spelling must become
general.
To test the charge that the teachers
who have been trained under the new
system are not good spoilers Superin-
tendent Cody, of Chicago, sent out
information blanks asking every
teacher to write down her name,
birthplace and age, and to indicate
the extent of her education. The re-
suits are said to be shocking. A large
proportion of the teachers misspelled
many of the most common words, one
being unable to write correctly the
name of her native village. Among
the errors was FEBRUARY" One
teacher was born in Tennessee" and
another in "Oelwein" (for Oldwine,)
Iowa. 1t is significant that one young
woman completed her education by
university extension" methods. AL
together the reports are calculated to
sustain the charge that the system of
photography teaching in the public
schools is defective.
There is no doubt that the spelling
matches which were the delight of
the pupils in the country schools of
an earlier day were particularly afec-
tive. Among the best spoilers today
are men who have had no college
training and little schooling beyond
that of the rural district school, and
who, like Abraham Lincoln, have ed
ucated themselves later without the
aid of teachers. The spelling class,
with its rivalry for the headship and
its stimulus of spelling down." fix
ed the spelling of a vast vocabulary
in their minds beyond the possibility
of loss. In English orthography the
dependence must be chiefly on mem
ory, and this is formed by repetition.
1t is obvious, too, that words are
more easily spelled and remembered
when divided into syllables. The ex-
perience of Chicago is probably that
of all other places where the old meth
DDS have been abandoned. - RF11aAeli-'
DTZI Tcrvr.L
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01
A RACE AGAINST TIME.

The Humane Society has entered
vigorous protest against the pro-
ceedings of a man who proposed to
ride horse from New York to Chi
cago in a race against time. The
idea was to compel the horse, if pos
slble, to average one hundred and
twenty-five miles a day.
This sort of thing is on level with
the six-day bicycle races which have
created unpleasant sensations recent
ly. There is no sense in it. Horse
racing on a track is an entirely differ
ent thing. The thoroughbred usual
ly enjoys the performance as much as
the spectators, if one can judge by
appearances. He is a creature care
fully bred by man for this express
purpose. His 1.-THE body, strong
muscles, sensitive nerves, and almost
human intelligence, are all adapted
to the business of speeding over the
track, and he instinctively seeks the
pleasure OF exercising his powers.
This is natural to every creature.
The athlete enjoys using his muscles /;
the mechanic delights in doing good
bit of work the artist revels in work
ing out conception. The hunting
dog is as eager for the hunt as the
sportsman. 1t is all part of the same
plan. Absolute laziness is foreign to
the laws of the universe. A man or
a beast in perfect condition delights
in the work for which he is fitted.
If he does not, it is sign either that
he is not in the right work, or that
something is wrong with him.
But six-day bicycle races are an
entirely different matter. They are
trials of endurance, and while the
power of endurance is a good thing,
there are plenty of occasions on which
it can be developed without cruelty
to animals or man. When a dam
breaks, and it is necessary for some
body to ride day and night to warn
people of food, there is no thought
of the strain but it is likely to fall
on one not particularly qualified for
it. There is no useful purpose to be
served by such artificial trials of
strength.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01
A DIFFERENT KIND OF BOOK.

"There was book agent around
today who wanted to sell me book
on etiquette and good behavior.
"It would not help you bit in
twenty years."
"Why, he said six lessons would
perfect me"
'Did you buy one?"
"No. told him I'd ask you if we
wanted it."
cts a humbug, John-can't be
taught in six lessons. I've been try
ing to teach it to you for sixteen
years and haven't succeeded"
"But this isn't your kind the agent
told me-"
"What kind is it?"
"Why, The Common Sense. ,"
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01
BROKE HIM OF BORROWING.

People who are continually bor-
rowing household untensils and ne
glect to return them are annoying
neighbors. The problem of how to
cure them of the habit was solved in
very costly way by one long-suffer-
ing householder.
A new man had moved into the
neighborhood. One Of the first
things he did, after getting his goods
into the house, was to borrow step
ladder from his next door neighbor,
Mr.. Smith. He needed it in putting
up his window-shades," and would
return it shortly"
Next he borrowed tack hammer,
to use in putting down his carpets.
Then he wanted a hatchet, a screw
driver and a gimlet, all of which
things Mr.. Smith, being an accom-
modating man, allowed him to take.
Several days passed and none of
the borrowed articles had been re-
turned.
"I'1l cure him." said Mr.. Smith.
About week later the new neigh
Dor came back with the screw-driver,
and apologized for having kept it so
long.
"That's all right" said Mr.. Smith,
with a genial smile. "But you had
better keep it now. I have bought
another"
With a muttered apology the new
neighbor hurried back and returned
with the gimlet, the hatchet and the
tack-hammer.
"You are welcome to those said
Mr.. Smith, cordially. 81 have bought
some others and don't need them"
"But-'
"That' all right. You keep them.
They'll come handy about the
house,
Again he hurried away, and was
returning with the step-ladder when
Mr.. Smith, who was just going out,
met him.
"Why, bless me-" he said, 'you
needn't bring that ladder back. 1
have got a new one, so l shall not
need it."
The new neighbor kept the things,
but he never borrowed anything of
Mr.. Smith again.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01
HOW THE LITTLE FELLOW WAS GOOD.

Johnny was very wicked boy, and
his mother sent him to Sunday school
to see if it would do him any good.
care you a good boy?" asked the
teacher
Mother says 1 m wicked wretch,
an s'pose she knows" :"
"What do you do that is bad ?"
ooh, mos everything go in
swimming and tell mother I got my
hair wet under the hydrant, and I
hooks watermillions out of the wagon,
and 1 chew terbacker, and 1 lick the
other boys when I don't get licked,
and But my little brother never
does any bad things like me-"
"Ah, I'm glad to hear that. Now,
Johnny, why is it that your little
brother never does anything bad and
you are so wicked 2"
II don't know, ma am, but 1 guess
it must be cause my little brother is
only three weeks old, and he amt
had as much chance as have"
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01
MY TREASURE HOUSE.

There are treasures in the ocean,
There are treasures in the sea;
There arc treasures in the mountains,
There are treasures on the lea;
But the great, the grand hereafter
Holds the treasure house for me.
There the spacious vaults of heaven
Will be opened for us all,
That our treasures may be garnered
In that storehouse, great and small;
For our Father owns the mansions
Where we may lay our treasures all.
There He sits in tn glorious radiance
OF an everlasting day,
And we'll know Him by his vestments,
All of spotless purity;
And a crown He'll wear-a crown of love
None more grand could ever be.
What are rubies, what are diamonds,
What the gold and silver CLEANS
OF earth's jewels-rare or common
Side the glory of the beams
That will fall upon our pathway
AS we cross the death-cold stream?
AS they light the gem-decked portals
Of the vauts-our treasures hold
Where are hidden many loved one
In that house of purest gold;
Where the Lord, the King of Glory
Doth the mystic key eer hold.
What are silks and costly satins.
What the tlnsel and the plumes.
With which on earth we deck our persons
AS we tread through stately roomsF
All will perish, all will vanish,
Ere the passing of many moons"
But the biood-washed. heaven gained garments
VIII be ours foreyermore.
Let us mourn not, then, for loved ones,
Who have gone but to prepare
Room and raiment for our spirits
When we. too, shall greet them there;
For we'll hope and strive to enter
The great treasure house of God;
Where the true and ransomed spirits
With the angels long have trod:
Mrs. W. p. Miller, In ST. Louis Globe Democrat.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01
NAMING THE BABY.

They talked of Medora Aurora and Flora,
OF Mabel and Marcia and Mildred and May,
Debated the question of Helen, Honora,
ClarisSa, Camilla and Phyllis and Fay.
They thought of Marcella, Estella and Bella,
Considered Cecilia, Jeanette and Pauline,
Alicia, Adela, Annette, Arabella
And Ethel and Eunice, Hortense and Irene.
One liked Theodore, another Leonora,
Some argued for Edith and some for Elaine,
For Madeline, Adeline, Lily and Lora,
And then after all they decided on Jane.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01
MAN AND HIS LEGS.

There are many indexes to the
mind, but l learned of a new one the
other day when called to see a busy
man at his office down on Broad steet.
When l entered the outer Office, it
was quite evident that he was in, for
1 could see him through an open door
leaning over his desk quite intent on
papers that lay in front of him. ]
spoke to the clerk in attendance,
whom l know real we'll, and asked
that he announce me- He glanced
into the other room before speaking.
"Wait minute or two," he said.
cit will be better, for he will have
you come in the moment I say you
are here.
I didn't quite understand what he
meant, but l took a seat to wait a
minute or two. I waited five of them
and then spoke again.
"Wait until he crosses his legs, u
answered the clerk.
"What has that to do with it ?" ]
asked.
Everything" he replied. He
doesn't like to be disturbed when he
is busy, and I know he is very busy
because he has his legs out straight
A man never thinks hard with his
legs crossed. As soon as his mind
lets up a little, then he straightens,
crosses his legs and is ready for visi-
tors and chat. When his legs &c
down again, it is time for the visitor
to take his leave. Just bear that in
mind and see if 1 am not right"
AS he finished speaking up went
the legs, and was announced and
received at once.-N. Y. Herald.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01

81 DErEsT cigarettes, petulantly
exclaimed the william of the play.
Cant smoke cigar in this scene
instead 7" 'No; the cigarette is es-
sential," replied the stage manager,
"You are very depraved sort of vii
lian, you know" ;"
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01

WE ARE asked by Brooklyn doc
tor to accept fit medicine in payment
for advertising. We will take itch
ointment and condition powders, but
we can't have fits just to fill Our adj
vertising space.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01

Dusty DANIEL-"Dey say dat
Homeless Harry is very modest
man." Cinder Charley-"Modest !
Why, he's so modest dat he won't
sleep in a yard where dere's undress-
ed lumber"
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01

TEAcHER--"Anonymous means
without a name. Write me sem
tence showing that you know how to
use the word" Small Girl writes
"Our new baby is anonymous.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01

IT'S THE high flyer who finds that
riches take unto themselves wings.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01

A TON of coal is more acceptable to
a live man than a wreath OF flowers
to dead one.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01

"a woman's WORTH" said Mistress Meg,
1.-TWO men, with all their brag and blowing.
1t takes hen to lay an egg,
And yet the rooster does the Growing y
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01

is YOUR uncle coming home from
the Philippines soon?" asked the Wis
itor. eyes" said the EDITORS little
boy "his subscription has expired.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01

THE WORST thing about acquiring
a reputation is that you have to live
up to it.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01

THE WEAKER a man is, the strong
er his bad habits grow on him.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01

THE FELLOW who says that it
costs no more for two to live than for
one evidently never had twins.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01

A WOMAN need never hope to keep
secret. Age will tell on her.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01

THE GIRL with a rainy day skirt
has been right in it.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01

Now here is a verse that's as true as it's terse,
And it measures mankind to the letter,
No man is so bad that he couldn't be worse,
Nor so good that he couldn't be better.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01
WHAT SHALL WE DO WITH OUR B0Ysl

"The changes" says President
David Starr Jordan, Gin social and
industrial conditions will make it each
year harder for the unframed man to
find profitable employment. At the
same time there never was time
when young man, sober and indus
trious, and trained to do things, was
so much in demand The time is
coming when the unskilled 1aborer
will have no place of any kind in the
industrial system. A bucket of coal
and a bucket of water will do his
work, and do it better. The laborer
must put brains into his work, and
brains will always be in demand.
There cannot be too much education,
even among laborers, if it be educa-
ton in the direction of effectiveness,
and an effective man will never find
the world overcrowded So far as
vocations are concerned, there is room
enough in almost any of tlIen, if one
is ready to do the best work he can.
But there is no vocation that will keep
a man in whisky very long, and there
is none that will give him leisure to
do poor work, and do it in dishon-
est fashion. The Tightening lines of
social development make it harder
and harder to keep step for the man
who doesn't try"
United States Commissioner w.
T. Harris says: "The question of
what boy shall do is one that may
be answered in a general way by a
glance at the evolution of human vo-
cations. The more applications of
machinery the less laborers are need
ed in the departments where narrow,
special education will suffice, and the
more laborer is required to have a
general and humane culture. This
doctrine contains cheering gospel of
final emancipation from drudgery.
The only condition attached to it is
that all should be educated. 1t be-
comes the interest of the selfish man
as we'll as the ideal of enlightened
philanthropy to have every member
of society SO intelligent that he can
find his vocation in higher order of
human occupations. The history of
industry goes back to time when
only one in thousand of the able
bodied population could be spared for
the creation of ornament or the min
istry of culture. Great progress had
been made when one in a hundred
could be spared for such purposes.
The United States and Great Britain
have reached point where five in a
hundred laborers are actually pursu-
ing vocations that have for their OBJ
iect the addition of ornament to what
is already useful. When the ratio
is reversed, and only five in a hun
dred are required to provide the crude
necessaries, and the remnant of soci-
ETY. may devote itself to the higher
order of occupations, the economic
problem will be solved. Hence a
constant readjustment of vocations is
necessary, and all 1aborers who are
mere hands work at a continually
growing disadvantage" "
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01

cling to the "pig-woman" idea and
have a great, strong, robust country
girl to do the hardest part of the work.
l can't do all kinds of pig work. At
first l did it all, and after my pigs in
creased by the dozen and 1 had sty
after sty built, / could no longer care
for them all. My assistant pig woman
is quite as pig-wise as am now, for
I have taught her with the utmost
care.
The only difference is that she
doesn't love the pigs, and l do, es-
pecially the little clean, pink ones
that are so wise and cunning and full
of roguery.
1 have my pigs named and they all
know me. 1t hurts to sell them and
know that Marguerite" and 'June
Rose" and "White Prince" are being
served up among sprigs of greenery
and fancifully cut vegetables Oh such
a lordly banquet table, very brown,
and crisp, and stiff-and dead. But
life is full of pain and sorrow and this
is how I take mine parting with
my pet pigs.
Now that 1 have become so exten-
sive a pig raiser have several differ
ent breeds-black, white and blue
and of late / have started in to cross
and breed fancy. Some say I am
running a great risk, but / have had
SO many showers of cold water thrown
over me by well-meaning advisers
and have gone on my sweet way, only
to surprise them in the end, that I
feel confident that l am able to go in
for fancy breeding with success.
My star for pig raising seems to be
soaring free, and I am going in for
pigs while success plays the band.
And I will say here at the end Of my
pig history that I am making more
money than the average dressmaker
and laying up store of health and
happiness that any of earth's greatest
might envy.-Eziga Gould, IN NezO
York Journal.
The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1902-02-01
A MODEL PIGGERY

To begin with, had my sty built
on high. dry place, for I had learned
in my wisdom that for the well-being
of my stock the piggery should stand
high. 1t is natural rise, where the
water can run away before and be-
hind, and so none can lodge in the
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1902-07-17
A Champion Cow.

Albert Hopewell, a farmer
residing near Sullivan, Ind,
has a COW which has made a
remarkab BILE .record in the last
four years, by giving birth to
eigh calves and raising all of
them. There have been four
sets Of twins, a male and fe-
male in each set. The calves
have been remarkably strong
and large, much better than the
average. All of the female
calves Lare being saved, and
MIR. Hopewell hopes to soon
lave the best dividend paying
berd in the country.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1902-07-17
Brother DickeY's Philosophy.

Eff we could git holt err de
angels we'd clip dey wings fer
feathers fer de Easter hats.
Eff some folks would change
roun' en- dress up dey hearts on
Easter de worl' would not know
'em.
Dey's gittin to be so much
stylein religion dat de good,
oil fashioned folks got ter take
ter de woods ter holler halle.
lula!
In dis day en- time some err de
churches is fixed up so fine you
can't see God thoo' de stained
winders.
We hear bout lots err folks
dyin' wild DIES a hope err heaven.
Pears ter me, wen a man gifts
dat fur along, he orter know fer
sartin des whar Jhe's gwlne.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1902-07-17
Ii Cost a Heap.

A lawyer ofysome distinction,
who began practice in a small
New England town, says his
first client required a deed
covering certain parcels of land
sold to a neighbor, says the
New York Times. The deed
was drawn in due form, and
after tits execution his client
demanded the bill 1t was 81
This amount was objected to as
most eXorbitant sum for the
service rendered.
Il told him." says the law
yer that to enable me to draw
the deed l studied two yea RS in
the Lancaster academy, and
this cost me 5000; then il spent
four years in Dartmouth col
lege, which cost me $3.50 year
more, 'aud then l went to the
Harvard Law school for an.
other year at cost of $500.
SO, you see, Mr.. Hines,
that to get the necessary educa
tion to do this work | had to
pay out $1,700, and yet you
think my charge OF 80 is large
one"
The man looked at me for a
moment in amazement and then
exclaimed: Gosh! what Il
darned fool you must have
been before they begun on you!'
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1902-07-17
Reflections of a Bachelor.

The surest way to avoid the
divorce court is to avoid the
marriage altar.
When IA girl is mad about
having to cross a muddy street
it is a sign there is a hole in her
stocking.
Some women's ideas of dis.
Greet conducts seeing how far
they can lgo without going so
far as to get caught.
The man who makes his wife
an allowance could alw avs Dor
row it back from her if she did
not keep dra wing it in advance.
The same man who locks the
stable door after the horse is
stolen sits down to consider the
serious side of matrimony after
he has gone and done tn Y
Press
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1902-07-17

The smaller and more insig-
nitiCant the office the more its
occupant is sometimes given to
arrogance and dogmatism. The
Vandalia town Board is a case
in point. Recently the town
voted almost solidly to issue
bonds to buy or build an cleo.
trio light plant. Wednesday
night the Board met and turned
the proposition down, claiming
the people didn't know wha t
they wanted. Ye Gods and
small fishes, on what kind of
meat do these Caesars feed that
they refuse Ito harkeu to the
voiceIof the people? A Board
of Aldermen is the servant OF
the people, not the master or
boss of the community. When
they fail to represent their con
stituency, they should be pc
litely asked to resign.-Cen
tralia Courier. That sounds
like Republican history in Rails
county and just like its Repub
lican county court and railroad
bonds.