The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1902-08-10
TO BRING UP CHILDREN
LEO TOLSTIO PLACES PARENTAL
EXAMPLE ABOVE ALL ELSE.
He Offers This Essay as the Fruit of
His Thoughts During His
Long Illness.

During the many days and nights Of my
long illness I gave much thought to the
question of what Is the proper way to bring
up children, and came to the conclusion
that IL is most difficult and intricate mat
ter IL a man or woman tries 10 educate boys
and girls without first having educated
himself or herself.
The moment we understand that self-edu-
cation must precede all and every attempt
to educate others the question of how to
bring up children makes way for this
How can 1 lead a life worthy Of MYSELF"
AS stated, 1 gave this matter much
thought while in the shadow Of eternity
as the doctors had II, and my Judgment is
that every single act of education presup-
poses self-education, that without the lat
ter education of others is an impossibility
and anomaly.
How shall we bring up children, feed
them, teach them. clothe them put them
to bed? AS we bring up ourselves. with
proper moderation to ft the individual case
of course. Parents and children should
have the same food, the same books, the
same hours for sleeping and rising.
II father and mother will set good ex-
ample by the moderate use of food and
drink, if their clothes are in harmony with
their means and surroundings. If the par
ents are cleanly, laborious. simple and
eager for self-improvement their children
will resemble them, and moderation and
simplicity will be the keynote Of the little
ones lives.
THE FORCE OF EXAMPLE.
Here is my advice TO parents: Let your
children see that you are trying to improve
your conduct and habits all the time: that
without compulsion you continue to edu-
cate your mind. Secondly, never have a
secret before your children; let nothing
in your own life admit of misconstruction
by your children.
1t is far better that children know their
elders weaknesses than that they suspect
them of leading a double life, one to i'm
press them (the children). the other to suit
themselves (the parents)
That parents refuse to make good their
faults, and. indeed. refuse to admit such
while readily recognizing and punish
ing their children's shortcomings causes
most Of the difficulties and disappointments
Of which fathers and mothers and edu-
Gators in general complain. For that rea-
son many parents wage a petty, nagging
AS take it. most children are morally su-
perior to most grown-ups; without indi-
eating it. sometimes even without knowing
it themselves, they do not only recognize
their parents faults in general, but like
wise their worst faults-hypocrisy. And
thus 1t comes to pass that so many chill
dren lose all respect for their parents
and pay no attention to their exhortations
and directions.
The most common cause of educa tional
failures is the parents hypocrisy; children.
who are naturally sensible to wrongdoing
soon become aware of this fault, turn from
their parents, and, without moral support
as they are go TO the bad. Now, to be at
liberty to unroll before our children's eyes
our entire life we have 10 turn over a new
leaf or. at least. mend our ways. That's
why said that self-education must always
precede every and any attempt to educate
others.
PARENTS HYPNOTIC INFLUENCE.
The influence father and mother have
upon the heart, or nature, Of sons and
daughters-that is education. The infiu-
ence should be exerted by a sort OF hyp-
motto suggestion; the good example itself
should command emulation-and will.
A child intuitively perceives whether his
parent is given 10 anger and passionate
outbursts. whether he has an inclination
for insulting people, for overburdening
servants, for laziness. amusement-seeking
pride, avarice. for thinking and speaking i'll
OF others. Your little boy or girl knows
full we'll whether or not you have proper
respect for the truth. whether you feign
piety OF believe in what YOU preach. II you