Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1902-05-10
What Women Think of Men.

Man is the prize conundrum that won-
an spends her life trying TO guess. He
is made up of as many contrasts in sweet
and sour as a salad dressing. He is as
full of unexpected turns as a vaudeville
show. He presents as great range
from hneness to commences as a de-
partment store. He is at once n luxury
aud neceSsity-one of the things we
may not be happy in possessing. hut
are miserable without.
He is our greatest blessing and the
source of nine-tenths of our woe, and
both he and we are happiest when he
is kissin@ away the tears he has made
US shed.
He is as brave as lion in the face
of actual danger but he is scared TO
death if he has the headache. and keeps
a doctor and three sick nurses on the
jump trying to stanch the blood from a
pin prick.
He has discovered all the new coun-
tries and the inmost secrets of science
but he can't find a pocket handkerchief
in the bureau drawer unless it happens
to he on top of the pile of clothing
He will face the enemy on the field
of battle without tremor, but he lives
in mortal terror of the cook and makes
his wife discharge the laundress.
He can hold 4 nation under military
rule, but he cant boss his own baby.
He will heroicaily endure maFtyrdom
for an opinion. but he hasn't the cour-
age to wear last years style hat.
In his doings with women he is a para
doX. He is woman's most relentless
critic and satirist vet he never loves
her so well as when she justifies his
gibes.
He prides himself upon being guided
by reason and logic, vet in the most im-
portant event of his life he throws iudg-
ment to the winds and marries a girl
because she has rosy cheeks and blue
eyes. The qualities he admires in his
sweetheart he abhors in his wife. He
chooses Il girl because she is butterfly
and then feels ill-used because she isn't
a domestic grub.
He will cheerfully work himself into
nervous prostration for his family. but
he won't bring home a package without
grumbling.
He trusts his wife with his name aud
his honor, but not with his poeketbook.
st 20 he falls in love with woman
old enough TO be his mother, and it flat-
tiers him to be addressed as "old mar. =
and treated as il he was a man Of the
world. At so only debutantes are Young
enough for his taste. and he likes to he
iollied by being called boy. He com
plains OF the matrimonial Moose. yet as
soon as he gets his neck out of one halter
he sticks it into another
He derideS 4 womans logic but adopts
her conclusions.
He bemoans the senselessness Of her
dress, yet he admires her most when she
is a mass of frilIS and frivol
In his general dealings with woman he
calls her an angel and treats her as if she
We're an idiot.
In theory he admires the sensible won,-
an, who is reserved and self-eontained.
but he marries the little goose WHO
weeps on the second button OF his waist
coat.
He can be as strong as a hero as wise
as seer, as patient as saint about
other objects. and then fly out into a
childish tantrum if dinner is five minutes
late. or his collar button rolls under the
dresser.
He spends his time and money seeking
love. and then trusts to luck to keep it,
No woman ever understood a man any
more than a man ever really understands
a woman. That is what makes the sexes
of perpetual interest to each other. The
guessing is the fun of the game.--Doro-
thy Dix in Philadelphia Inquirer.