Arizona republican., 1902-12-01
Copyright, 1902, by R. H. Russen)

Once there was a plain, unvarnished Yank who made his Pile in a Scrub Town situated midway between the Oats Belt and the Tall Timber. He was a large and sandy Mortal with steel-trap Jaw and a cold glitterinS Eye. He made his first Stack a Dollar at Time on straight Deals but after awhile he learned a few Things. He organized Stock Companies and then crawled out after hooking up with the Velvet. Every one called him Mister and treated him with Politeness but, just the same, when he walked into all Ofhce Building they all wondered what he had come after and there was more or less locking of Safes. It is only fair 10 remark. on the Side. that he wouldn't take anything which was se- curely spiked down and the Grand Jury never bothered him. because he worked under a Contract.
 The Financier was the high Center Pole of a Bank and a Department Store and several Factories that gave Young People a Start in the World at something like s2.75 per Week.
 He was accustomed to having all tho Subordinates stand on one Foot and tremble whenever he showed up. In fact. he was a very hefty Proposition all through the Business District But when he struck the Street leading to his Home he began to reef Sails and lower all of his Flags.
 In his own DomiciIe he did not even play Second Fiddle. He simply trailed along at the flag end of the Parade and carried the Music. The Piercing Eye and the Peremptory Manner that caused all the Bookkeepers to fall off from their High Perches and prostrate themselves had no visible effect on Laura and the Girls. Popsy was a High Guy al the Directors Meeting but a mighty cheap Souffie at his own Fire side. Any time that his Plans did not coincide with those of the Feminine Bunch, they passed him back handed Veto that would cause him to He quiet for Days at time
 The Financier loved the boundless West, where the Sack Coat abounds and the Cuss- Word is a common Herit- age. Domestic Cigars were good enough for him and he figured that one good reliable Hired Girl who knew how to cook Steak was all the Help that was needed in any House. But Mother had seen Fifth Avenue in a Dream. and the Girls attended a Boarding School at which nearly every one knew some one who was Prominent Socially. They had done a lot of Hard Work at the Piano and taken a side-hold on the French Language and it seemed tC them that they were wasting then Time in lettering on the Outskirts oi Civilization when they might be up al Headquarters cutting more or less oi
 
 Reub Town wore Derbies with then Evening Clothes and came to Dance. with their White Gloves smelling O. Gasoline, in addition to which they lacked Repose. If they had stopped tc cultivate Repose, most of them would have landed in the Villa set aside fo Paupers.
 When Laura and the Girls first advo cated pulling up Stakes and doing tall Hike to the East, the Produce emitted q Roar that would have fright ened any one except Laura and tin Girls. They closed in on him iron three Directions and beat down his De fense. When they got through wit the living Meal Ticket he was as mee as an English Servant and ready t take orders from any one.
 So the Caravansary moved away to ward the Rising Sun. At Wilkesbarre Pennsylvania, the Heavens opened an a Great Light struck down upon then transforming all except the one wh happened to carry the Letter of Credit Laura and the Girls suddenly forgo that there was any Land west of Pitts burg and they dropped their B's an got the Kangaroo Walk and began t order their Food in Foreign Language. After that all that Father had to d was follow along and look PIeasan and dig every few Minutes.
 The Outfit stopped at the Waldor three days so as to obtain a Residenc and after that they Registered as bein from New York. Then they thre' Papa on a Boat and took him to tn Other Side, the Place where American are so Popular, if you don't care wha you say. By paying off the Mortgag they obtained a Suite at Hotel pat ronized by the Nobility and Gentry all supported by People from Iowa Afte which they began to present Lette. of Introduction and try to butt ir Laura and the Girls felt that if onl they could eat a Meal once or twice i the groomy Presence of those who ha Handles to their Names, they would D ready to fall back and die Happy The had some Trouble about getting int the Tall Game on account of thei Money. In the States the general Ru of People worship the Almighty Dolla but in England they hate the Sigh of it.
 In spite of the Fact that they wer sinfully Rich they succeeded in Elbow ing their way into several Dinners a which 1t was necessary to put Ice i the Claret in order to keep it at in Temperature of the Room. The Finar cier in his First Part Clothes with q Ice-Cream Weskit, was a Picture tha no Artist could paint. His hair woul not stay combed and he hardly eve knew what to do with his Hands
 Laura and the Girls could forget tha they had ever seen the Missouri Rive but not so with old Ready None, Right at the Table, sitting opposite tr Earl of Hammersmith or the Maruu of Stoke-on- Trent, while Laura and tt Girls would be talking about the .N,..~