davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-08-28
"What for?"

'What for?''
''I've cut my toe half off and shall
be dead man if not treated at oncev'
Mrs Bowser telepnoned for the doc
tor. and it happened that he came at
once. He found small cut and two
drops of blood on Mr.. Bowser's toe,
and he applied bit of plaster.
"Will-will it be case of blood poi
soning?" was tremblingly asked as he
was ready to go.
mo" he gravely replied Nobody
ever heard of a donkey being afflicted
with such an ailmentw
And when he had departed Mr.. Bow
ser glared at Mrs. Bowser for two or
three minutes and then said:
'The train which will take you back
to your mothers house leaves at 10:10
tomorrow forenoon. and you'd better
begin packing" M. QUAD.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-08-28
ers. We do Job Plumbing.

WE have 200, ZOO acres of land in
Northern and Central Wis. $4,000
acres in Clark county. Large tracts
in Gates, Sawyer, Price, Barron,
Washington and other counties,
We can show you as good lands as
any one, get you reduced rates on
any railway and go with you any
day Now is a good time to look
at land. For further information
call on or write J. r. PLACE
or j. T. TENANT,
24tf Lancaster, Wis.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-08-28
Suicide With a Cucumber.

SulSlIC Will NuNuLiDCI.
Pokey O'Rourke, who has been
counting Sal Skinner for the past
twelve years, committed suicide last
night by killing himself with green
cucumber. Pokey had been down
to Sails house until twelve o'clock
every night for four years, and it
has been noticed that he was grow
ing respondent. He thought Sal
didn't love him, but she did. He
thought she would never marry
him, but she would have done SO at
a moments notice. All these years
Sal has been waiting for POkey to
propose and Pokey has been waiting
for Sal to do the same thing. Ac-
cording to her own story she did all
but ask him ON several occasions,
but he never did tumble. Last
night Sal forgot to ask him, and
when he left the house he went
straightway to a cucumber patch,
where he secured the fatal 'cumber,
wrinkled and warty, bilious and
blue. He ate the fruit without salt,
which in few moments must have
wendell his love-sick soul into the
sulphuric presence Of his Satanic
Majesty. Sal was notified and iden-
titled the body as that of her lover,
but said it was bloated all out OF
reason. Sal came over to the Office
and asked us to write fitting cpl
taph for Pokey, which she said she
would have placed on puncheon OF
pitch pine at his head, and just to
accommodate Sal, who is a good pa
iron of ours, we called up every
tender thought that ever crept
through our brainy pate and wrote:
Out on the sand of Beetown fair
A cucumber grew in the summer sun,
But no man knew that this 'Cumber was
there
In all of the town save one.
Filled with the 'morbus from end to end,
With fever from side to Side
Twas well no farmer or farmers friend
Had the bilious thing eSpied.
This cucumber grew till its rind was yellow,
But at last it was espied
By POkey O'Rourl<e. poor fel low, poor fellow.
Who ate the fruit and died.
He pulled the fruit with his own hard hand,
And to end loves sad turmoil
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-08-28

u't Wnen you once get razor IN your
hands,"
'Don't be silly. I'll get the foOtbath
and some warm water, and after the
corn has been softened up I'll pare it
off,"
A quarter of an hour later Mrs. Bow
Ser was ready The foot was lif,ed
out OF the bath and wiped dry and
rested on her lap. and she opened the
razor to do business.
woman, don't want any nonsense
over this matterv warned Mr.. Bowser
as he drew up his leg.
'There won't be. Let your foot down
and hold STILL"
Should you attempt to cripple me
for life by giving my foot a swipe with
that razor you must take the conse-
quences!'
81 will. Now, I'll take your toe In
this hand and the razor in this and
''Look at that blamed old cat!' shout
ed Mr.. Bowser as he drew his foot
away. ''By the whiskers of Cicero, she
is licking her chops and anticipating
a feast of blood!'
Mrs. Bowser got up and drove the
considerable delay Mr. Bowser leaned
back in his chair and shut his teeth
hard and closed his eyes. 1t was a
light, deft hand that welded the ra-
zor, and the corn was all ready to be
annihilated, but at the first touch of
steel he winked his toes and opened
his mouth to say:
81 don't believe | can stand it. II
that razor slips and cuts me, I'm in for
case of blood poisoning and horri-
BILE death. I'll wait till tomorrow and
go to a regular corn DOCTOR
''There will be no slip and no blood
poisoning" replied Mrs. Bowser. CAL
you've got to do is to hold still for five
minutes. l am always cutting cOrns
off my own feet Do have a little grit
about YOU"
"Grit! Grit! Woman, don't talk to
me about grit! You have seen me sit
and have fourteen teeth yanked out
without uttering groan. | Know the
dangers of blood poisoning, however.
What are you doing"
I'm going to pare off your corn"
"You let it alone I'll see about it
tomorrow. l don't propose to put my
life in your hands. Stop that, l sayr'
land you won't let me pare your
corn OFF," asked Mrs. Bowser as she
still held on to the toe.
"No. never! Woman, don't you dare
to fool with me! You can take your
self upstairs, and if l think it best I'll
white away at the corn myself If |
bring about my own death, there's no.
body else to blame That old cat has
come up again. Take her along with
you, or I'll slice her blamed head off,"
Mrs. BoWser vacated without argu-
ment, picking up the cat as she went,
and Mr.. Bowser dropped his foot back
into the bath and shivered over his
narrow escape. After about quarter
Of an hour, however, his nerve began
to return and he wiped off his foot
and decided to begin operations. He
did it in a very gingerly manner, as if
shaving his chin for the first time, but
he had not made over five cuts at the
corn when Mrs Bowser heard a wild
yell, followed by a heavy galloping
around the room.
"What on earth is it?' she asked as
she came flying downstairs to find Mr..
Bowser hopping about on one foot.
"Send for the doctor!' he shouted in
reply.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-08-28

Since 1872 1000 miles of railroad dis
have been laid in the Japanese EN-
pire.
Since 1872 1000 miles of railroads
have been laid in the Japanese en-
pire
Ninety per cent. of the 12S.000,00C
people of the Russian empire are farm
erS.
San Francisco has one saloon for
every twenty-five adult male inhabi
tants.
Green wood contains fully As per
cent of water, and thorough season
ing usually expels but 35 per cent. of
this fluid
The Island of Cuba was known by
that name by the I4ucanyan Indians,
who were with Columbus when he
discovered it.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-08-28
Extracts from the Beetown Busie.
Card of Thanks.

l wish to thank the dear friends
who SO kindly assisted me in my
hour Of trial at a recent entertain
ment when my daughter, Junebelle,
broke down and forgot her lines.
Their kindness in tanning me, pas
sing the salts, etc., in those dark
moments of despair until my daught-
er remembered where she was and
went on, will be remembered with
emotion and gratitude.
MRS. YSANDER BEGOOD.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-08-28
OF HIIHot Weather Enemies

Of humanity cholera is the worst.
Treatment to be effective must be
prompt When vomiting, purging and
sweat announce that the disease is
present, combat it with Perry Davis
P4inkiller. All bowel troubles, like
dlarrheea, cholera morbus and dyson
terry are overcome by Painkiller.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-08-28

Edgar-Well Ethel, what did you
find at that wonderful fire sale?
Ethel-Oh, Edgar. got some lovely
silk stockings at II cents pair! There
Is not thing the matter with them
except the feet are bur ued off!-Detroit
Free Press
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-08-28
Mrs. Gilead's Baby.

Mrs. Balm Gilead brought her lit
tie girl baby to DR.. Ignatius Horn
brook Friday to have her tongue
clipped, as she was tongue-tied at
birth. Grandfather Sultana says it
is needless to state that the child in
heri5ed this popularity from its
fathers side of the house.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-08-28
What She Mist.

Captain-We ran into a dense fog
last night.
Miss Tooriste-How strange! Why,
the shock never woke me up!-Ohio
State Journal.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-08-28

The total number of farms in Ala
bama is given at 223, 22O, of which
129, 1877 are operated by whites, and
04.083 by colored farmers.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-08-28
More Melons.

r. U. Wise brought the first wat
ermelon of the season we have seen
to this Office July 28th. 1t was a
fine, juicy fellow and for so early in
the season was in good eatable con-
dit;on. Come again, Bob.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-08-28

copyright, 1902, by G. e. Lewis
U "A YHEN Mr.. Bowser arrived
" home from the office the
Wv other evening, he found
Mrs. Bowser and the cat
awaiting him ON the front steps, but
he passed them with an icy glare and
entered the hall and flung his hat on
the floor
''Has-has anything gone wrong to-
day?" timidly asked Mrs. Bowser.
Nothing except that l have been
walking on the edge of my own grave!'
he bluntly replied.
Ibid you just escape an awful acct
dent?"
''No matter. l shall have something
to say to you after dinner"
The dinner was brief one. but while
it lasted Mrs BOwser felt cold chills
go over her She couldn't recall that
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-08-28

If it wasn't popular, if it wasn't loved
by the people why do dealers say-"We
have something just as good as the
Madison Medicine Cos. Rocky Mount
ain Tea. Think it over: 35c.-Hatch
Bros. and JOS Bennett.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-08-28

Representative Williams of Missis.
sippi has new negro story:
''Are you the defendant?" asked a
man in the courtroom, speaking to an
old negro.
mo, bOss,' was the reply; Il amt
done nothing to be called names like
that. Use got lawyer here who does
the defensing."
Then who are yOu?'
Use de gentleman what stole de
chick ashington Post.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-08-28

He ate it and slid to that thirSt-Stricken land
Where they have no water to boil.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-08-28
Paper for Packing q.

For packing away ribbons, flowers
or lace, and other chiffons, tissue pa
per is most valuable, and quantities
of it should be laid in the folds among
the laces of evening gowns, both when
they are packed for travelling and also
when they are lying in the wardrobe
between the times of wearing. In this
way tissue paper acts as protector
from creases, while pads of it, in
serted in bows or loops or ribbon, will
prevent the squashed and depressed
look that one often notices in the mil
linery Of those who travel about with
out an experienced maid, and who are
not themselves skilled in the art of
packing.-Chicago Post.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-08-28
BOWSER HAS A CORN
HE GETS A BIG ONE ON THE LARGE
TOE OF HIS RIGHT FOOT.
His Wife and Razor Play n Lead
ing Part In Trying to Remove It..
He Grows Suspicious, However, and
Tries to Pare 1t Himself.

copyright, 1902, by c. E. Lewis.l
Albuquerque daily citizen. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1895-1903, 1902-04-17
WHITE OAKS.
From the Eagle.

From the Eagle.
Miss Kittie Buford was in Sunday
from Texas park where she is teaching
a successful school.
Judge j. b. Collier was in from the
ranch. attending to some matters be-
fore his court.
The fruit trees are now blooming at
White Oaks and the indications are
that we shall have a fine fruit crop
this year.
John w. Owen himself as
a candidate for tie Office of sheriff of
Lincoln county at the coming election
this fall.
]. f. Wharton is improving his ranch
east of the Patos mountains with a
view of residing there this summer.
He is planting 200 fruit trees and fenc-
ing about 1000 acres of pasture land,
besides making additions to the ranch
buildings, and putting up windmills for
pumping water. .
J. E. w. Hubert, deputy district clerk,
appointed Jesse Parker and Ed c.
Pingston to serve as jury commission
ers with John M. Keith, the other two
appointed by the court being unavoid-
ably absent, and the jury lists were
prepared by the parties named.
Albuquerque daily citizen. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1895-1903, 1902-04-17
ARLINGTON

From the Hustler.
A long string of f~reighters left this
week for Albuquerque loaded out with
onions.
Miller & Stump will begin moulding
brick today. They expect to burn a
kiln of 100. 900.
The Presbyterian church people
have on foot a plan for the building
OF a cosy parsonage, adjoining their
church.
A number of town dogs got into Will
liam Locke's sheep corral on Tuesday
night, and killed fourteen fine wethers
out of a bunch of 200 brought up for
mutton.
Alfred Wetherell and family have
moved to ThOreau, where Mr.. Wether-
ell goes to take charge of affairs in
behalf of the Hyde Exploring Expedi-
ton.
Farmers and ranchmen in this sec
ton are all busy making garden and
blowing. San Juan county will add
5000 acres of land under cultivation
this yea and still we have las, 900
more acres that "a be cultivated.
Boone Vaughan, wife and two little
daughters of Sheriff Brown have gone
to st. Louis, where Mrs. Vaughn will
undergo an operation. Her many
friends look forward with much pleas
ure to her return in good health.
Late arrivals from Albuquerque state
that Richard Wetherell has secured a
hose cart for the new Pennington fire
company, also that sever families from
there are now on their way here to 10
cate permanently.
Albuquerque daily citizen. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1895-1903, 1902-04-17
FAR MINGTON.

From the Times.
Mrs. e. C. Arnold is up at Durango
for a snort visit this week.
Born, to DIR. and Mrs. A. Rosenthal,
a girl, Monday morning, April Z.
Mrs. ID. X. b. Sellers is visiting at
the Springer ranch above Aztec, this
week.
George Z. Allen circulated a sub
scription list Wednesday, and got $500
pledged for the erection of a Presby-
terrain parsonage.
Mrs. Elliot Locke and others of our
charitably inclined ladies raised a con-
siderable amount of money this week,
TO aid Mr.. Demetrius. of Flora Vista.
II. S. Stevens has taken charge OF
the Hyde ferry on the San Juan as the
warm days have raised the river until
fording is now dangerous.
A new move has been made in the
p~ostofice contest here. by w. Il. Estes
withdrawing his resignation. This will
settle the matter for the time being, at
least. =
Judge McFie, in his reply to his petit
TONERS, gives some very sensible rea-
sons for putting the term of court on
until October. 1t will certainly be
more convenient for our farmers to
have the term held in the fall.
Mrs. Vaughan should bring damage
suit against the Hustler for stating
that her husband has gone off with an
other mans wife and two daughters
when it was herself that accompanied
him and her nieces 10 st. Louis, where
she goes for medical treatment.
The apricot and peach trees are now
in full bloom and the fruit in a most
healthful condition. This season prom
ises to be a record breaker. With g
number of new orchards that will com'
into bearing this year, these valleys
will give a fruit yield that in tonnage
has never been equaled.
The funeral of Mrs. Mary j. Star
was held at the Methodist church Mon
day forenoon, from where the remains
were taken to the cemetery. Mrs
Starr and her husband were among IN
Albuquerque daily citizen. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1895-1903, 1902-04-17

Thinks the wife, to have the wedding ring
slip from the finger. Something is going
to happen"
Something is HAPPENING. That ring
could hardly be pulled from the finger
when it was put there a few years ago.
Now It slips off by its own weight. How
thin the fingers have grown And the
fingers don't grow thin alone. How thin
the face is and how thin the once plump
form. Almost unconsciously the wife
has been fading and wasting away. The
strength given to children has never been
regained. Drains which should have been
stopped have been neglected.
women, unless some friend has shared
with them the secret of the strengthening
and healing power of DR.. Pierce's Favorite
Prescription. 1t regulates the periods,
dries the drains which undermine the
strength, heals inflammation and ulcera-
ton, and cures female weakness. 1t makes
the baby's adven practically painless and
gives vigor and vitality to nursing mothers.
wwords cannot tell how grateful I am for
your kind advice and good medicines writes
Mrs. John Cooke, of Hastings, NORTHUMBERLAND
Co., Ontario. ~ have been in poor health for
four years back and this spring got so bad 1
could not do my work. l went to the doctor and
he said l had liberation and falling of the
internal organs, but thought I would try your
'Favorite Prescription. ! took five bottles and
three of the Golden Medical Discovery and
one vial of DIR. Pierce's Pellets, and I can safely
say that l never felt better in my life.n
A Ladies' Laxative-Dr. Pierce's Pleas.
ant Pellets. One single, small pellet 10 q
laxative dose.
Albuquerque daily citizen. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1895-1903, 1902-04-17
SANTA FEES NEW PULLMAN.
Goes in Service on Topeka-kansas Cit,
PIuu.

Plug.
Within the past few days, the Santa
Fe has put in service on its Topeka
Kansas City plug train n of the most
elegant pieces OF equipment in the
west-in fact, the peer of almost any
in the whole country. 1t is a Pullman
coach. one of an order of thirty-three
which will he distributed along the
line as fast as they are turned out OF
the factory. 1t has a seating capacity
of eighty, the ordinary chairs being
displaced by the new style of high
back seats which are more comfortable
and at once give more space than the
chairs. They are easily reversible, re-
curing simply to be pushed one way
or the other instead of being lifted and
turned as was the case of those of the
old type. The windows are large,
double ones. the same size as those OF
the new type of chair cars which were
recently put in service on the through
trains, giving abundance of light and
opportunity to view the country. The
wood finish is of quarter-sawed oak,
the headlining being an olive green
with heavy gold border. In the EN-
ter is an arch-way which disposes of
the old partition so inartistic and OBJ
structive. The car is 70 feet long and
surmounts two pairs of six-wheel
trucks. The coal and water supply is
taken on from the top, thus doing
away with all inconvenience to pass
engers. The vestibules are broad. the
brass and other external finishings
are respondent and the air of the
whole coach is one of inviting restful-
ness to the traveller.
Albuquerque daily citizen. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1895-1903, 1902-04-17
EVER GET "FUll?"
On Other Thinos Than Liouor


1t is profitable for anyone to study
food in order to regulate the health,
not with medicine, but by building up
healthy nerve centers with good food.
A man who has made something of
a study on this line writes from Iowa
City: When | first tried Grape-Nuts
1t was at the table of a prominent
state official and the remarkable taste
attracted me. | afterwards investi-
gated the subject carefully and dis.
covered that Grape-Nuts contains dex-
trose sugar. The starchy part Of the
food is transformed into starch sugar
or dextrose. Those same results are
produced by the digestive organs by
the action of the saliva and the pan
create juices on starchy foods. These
facts convinced me that Grape-Nuts is
a natural, pre-digested food ant just
what | required and needed.
Il had been suffering from a full
feeling after meals and generally more
or less headache. All this trouble left
when | quit using white bread, warm
biscuits, etc.
1T was about this time | came home
from school, broken down physically
and mentally. | only weighed 120
pounds. At my earnest request moth
err began serving Grape-Nuts every
meal and she said she had never eaten
anything that agreed with her physical
condition as did my new food as she
termed IL.
I'm five weeks | weighed 1873 pounds
a gain of Is pounds, and | feel sc
strong that | have been able to do from
10 Il Is hours of hard work daily. My
mind has never seemed so clear before
and | am thoroughly convinced that
there is no food like Grape-Nuts to pro
duce health and a strong and clear
brain" Lee Arlington, Box 1855, lows
] City, Iowa.
Albuquerque daily citizen. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1895-1903, 1902-04-17
AZTEC.

From the Index.
Miss ella Whitehead, of Pennington,
is the guest of Miss Gentry Prewitt
this week.
Rev. H. w. Rankin, the noted van
gelist of Denver, WI begin a series of
meeting AT the Presbyterian church
in Aztec, Sunday, April 20.
DIR. Z. G.. Condit sustained a painful
injury from being thrown from a horse,
the injuries combining him to the house
for a day or two.
N. e. Stevens, of Albuquerque, prom
inent in Odd Fellow circles in the terri
tory and general agent of the Monte.
yuma Savings, Loan and Building asso-
citation of Albuquerque. is in Aztec on
business.
Ernest, the infant son of Mr.. and
Mrs. Frank MUIR. was kicked by a
horse last week, the horses hoof strik.
ing the little fellow OF the head back
of the ear. DIR. West dressed the wound
and the little one is recovering as fast
as could be expected.
George X. Griffin was elected alder
man of the town of Pennington at the
recent election. George is now an al
derman, a director of the First Nation
al bank and one of the elect when ia
dies choice is called at the bales in
this country. His brier residence in
Aztec equipped George to make the
record he is now in possession of.
The term of the Aztec schools which
closed March 2S was the most success
full in the history of ,-e school. The
principal. Miss Waring. gave a medal
to the pupil having the highest number
of perfect lessons. and the recipient OF
this honor was Bertha Farmer, who
had the best record for the term. Those
who graduated this year were Grace
Dalton, Elsie MUIR and Lily Blancett
Nearly all the pupils were advanced {
grade, and fifty-five more were enroll
ed than in the previous year, the 'tota
being about 80 in the two rooms. The
school closed with an excellent enter
tainment given by the pupils, which
was attended by a large number of thu
parents and friends.
Albuquerque daily citizen. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1895-1903, 1902-04-17
BAD
From the Argus.

from the Argus.
Prof. G. +. Ellis, assistant to Profes
sor Berner in the Carlsbad public
schools, has been rendered the position
Of superintendent in the schools al
Portales, at a very remunerative sal
airy. He has the matter under consid
Grafton.
DR.. A. A. Bearrup last week struck a
well on his place southwest of town al
a depth of sixty-seven and a half feet
1t is within 200 yards o. the Dark Can
yon wells that supply the town with
water. and the new wells water is SOFT
er and better than its %neighbor's. Inc
doctor has installed a Leader windmill
which has a minimum capacity Of
twenty gallons per minute.
Everything now points to a very bis
fruit crop in this section, this year
the time for fearing late frosts having
been successfully passed. The contin
gency o. -eavy hail storms is the only
bugbear, now, to the orchardists. The
frosts of two weeks or so ago were
more a blessing than bane, as it thin
ned out the fruit buds almost as eff
fectively and intelligently as though
the trees had been thumb pruned. f.
G. Tracy informs the argus that from
present indications he will have as
large. II not larger, crop than the rec
ord breaker of two years ago.