The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1902-10-22
DER GERMAN COBBLER.
He Gets More Advice as to How to
Make Customers.

Hans" says dot little tailor to me
one day When I don't hat no peesness
in my shop, der great trouble nit you
is dot you don't hit off der pooblic- Look
at my easel l started in nit two vests
und an old pair of trousers. und now l
vhas wholesale und retail und can pay
my gas bill eafery day in der week. 1t
vhas all in hitting der pooblic shust
right" 4
but how can I 90 her?'' L saws
Dot is What L shall tell you. Der
poobIc vhas full Of SMOKES und fun
If you can make a man smile, he vhas
a customer. Two years ago, When pees-
ness vhas poor, / put oop sign dot
reads, Half you seen dot tale of
coat? By golly. but more ash one
tousand peoples read dot sign und laugh
oafer him und come in to buy 1t vhas
soOch a crowd around dot der police
hat TO club fourteen peoples in one
day"
But What makes 'em laugh?"
AT der shoke."
What SMOKER"
Der tale of coat. Can't you see
how it vhas?'
mo. If YOU haf some tail of a coat.
l can't see Why anybody should laugh" "
Den you Was tool. 1 shall gift
you one more chance, howefer. l shall
make you g sign for der window. und
if he don't bring in customers YOU had
better go und drive some ash wagon. -
When dot sign vhas up, he reads,
Souls renewed for 25c apiece" l don't
see low she Whas at all. und 1 don't
laugh, but dot little tailor shakes all
oafer und gets red in der face. In half
an hour after he goes AWAY man
comes in ind says:
"Cobbler. haf lived in dis town for
thirty years, und dis Vhas der first time
vbas insulted."
How vkas it2'' says.
DO you pellet dot my soul vhas like
an old vest dot you can take him out
und Sit in new back? How dare you
make FUN ofs6er human soul! Was
rot my soul above wax und pegs und
leather?"
1t vhas shust a little shoke,"I says.
'Nhell you stop her right AWAY. Der
poobllc don't like sooch SMOKES. 1t vhas
an right If you say, Come in und get
heeled for a quarter but When you
come to der soul. dot vhas deterrent. 1t
WAS plain to me dot you vhas an old
scoundrel, ind if you gif me two words
l II make you very tired!"
Der next man who reads dot sign
takes fife minutes about it, und when
he comes in he looks awful lonesome
! una shakes his head und says:
Cobuer, it vhas too late For feefty
years vhas bad, bad man. l drink
una swear und cheat und rob und muir
DER, und my soul vhas all worn cut 1t
WAS IKE trying to make new hat to
an old band. Why don't you put oop
I dot sign a year ago?''
! 1Di LINK Oh It.
Too bad-teo bad. One year ago you
might haf put some cement patches on
/ my scul und save me from destruction,
put now vhas gone oop Salt creek. Can
l lean on your shoulder ind shed some
/ tears2"
I vhas too busy"
Can I sit down on a chair und
I like you to get outdoors
so YOU don't care if my soul vhas
gone, eh?' he yells at me. ssYou can
sit dere. nit your hammer ind pegs,
/ una peg AWAY und hat no sympathy
Tor me, who vhas doomed? Well, we
4 shall see about dot!'
4 Und he gifts me six cuffs on der ear
4 und two kicks, und if 1 don't yell out
sl MAYBE ne wrecks my shop. 1 don't Pc
lieI no more IN signs, but before he vhas
\ down a woman comes in und looks at
me und says:
~c.o3bbler. like to ask favor of
.'VteI2"
WAS married womans for twenty
years During all &ot time my husband
was yJa drunk two or three times a week.
nc beats me around und swears at me.