Daily Kennebec journal., 1902-03-27
IN AN AUCTION ROOM.
Inc Auctioneer Finally Induced a Bid
From a Woman.

There are any number of Japanese
stores along the boardwalk-any number
of art" stores These are the auc-
tioneer's stamping grounds. Three times
a day, according to the numerous signs
displayed, he trains the eloquence OF ms
vocal guns upon you. At IL in the morn
ing, in the afternoon, at night. There
are chairs in regular rows, wide open
door-and the auctloneer.
He's well dressed, bland, trifle blase.
He knows it all, has seen 1t ALL ana ne
Wearied of it all-even to the taking OF
your money. He's effrontery run ROT,
impertinence glorified and brutality all IN
capital letters. He makes you feel, the
second he has opened his mouth, that
you're a small, crawling worm and that
he's an eagle, so high among the clouds
that you're a mere speck on the typos-
raphy of the country. He insults your
intelligence, but does it in such brazen
way that your anger is lost in your dd-
miration for his temerity.
Stop at this door for minute. and let
listen There he stands, Il tiny vase IN
his hand, a look on his face that tells
YOU. as plain as words could, that ne
considers himself a badly used man. ~.
"If l was to be hung in i've minutes,
he is saying, Il couldn't tell why in the
world you ladies came in here this
morning Perhaps it was chilly on the
board walk-and it's nice and coy here,
and you could bring your knitting in here
and save 10 cents by not going on the
pier Well, 1 don't mind it. I'm paid
whether you folks buy one cents worth
or $1,000 worth. My salary goes on just
the same. But, ladies', ladies, for heav-
ems sake; pretend to be interested.
Here's a cloissienne vase worth 81 to inn
port and the lady in the last row bids %
cents for it. Why, that wouldn't pay Tor
one bit of silver wire in it. Suppose IL l
put up a bit OF japanese bronze worth
s6UO one of y.u ladies would pipe out
| 30 cents for it-and then want me to go
| down on my knees to beg her to take IT.
He signs, then says gently: Dear "a
4. ma
81 vase?" He looks around inquirinsly.
Then, as if an inspiration has come to
| him, he says, convsncingly: II thefe
a woman in this room who actually mas
| the nerve to bid 26 cents for this 81 clols-
| sienne vase, I'll knock II down to her L m
| just going to see if any one in this we'll
dressed crowd actually brought her pock-
| etbook
| A slip of a girl giggles; four or five of
| the women squirm uncomfortably and
| look fiustered and embarrassed. Then
| one maid in black clears her throat and
| says. as she fushes to the roots of her
hair: ''Ill bid 26 cents for it,
| The auctioneer turns very slowly and
looks at the maid. Everybody else looks
and the girls flush deepens. Then the
| auctiCneer bows very low.
| THANK you, miss-thank you very
much, indeed The vase is yours at 26
| cents-and it cost-the mere duty on it
paper on it and a bunch of violets In it.
Then give 1t to the lady and get her 70
| cents.
| Again the auctioneer sighs:
| Speak up. ladies', and tell me W at
you'd rather have me offer now. We
| nave some very fine gold dollars at 8
| cents each this rnorning-O. here's a gilt
boudoir clock. Perhaps some one here
| merely has bedroom instead of a bou-
| doir. Doesn't make a bit of difference
| to the clock. It's set with rhinestones,
| has two gilt cupids, is warranted to-"
And then you pass on-and leave the
| women to their fate.
The auctions are open once more-and
| the voice of the turtle is heard in the
land!-Atlantic City letter in Philadelphia
Press.