Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1902-12-13
TOO MANY RECORDS

Before the session of Congress began
last winter" said the little housewife with
the slightly mournful expression, my hus-
band made up his niad that he was ga-
ing to keep thoroughly posted on legisia-
tive affairs. He said that while the news
paper covered legislative matters pretty
weH he wanted to get ali of the details.
and read all OF the best speeches in full.
not only for diversion and information, but
for instruction. So he wrote to his rep
resentative. requesting that the Congress
sional Record be sent to him from the be-
ginning of the session. The representative
put my husbands name down for the Rec
ord, and. dear me! what terrible, awful.
hopeless nuisance that Record has been
to me!
AT first my husband experienced quite
glow of pride to have the Congressional
Record brought to the door on the first de-
livery every morning by the postman, and
for almost a whole week he not only &C
tualy took the Record out Of its cover,
but he sat down every night after dinner.
and after he had read The Star, went
through the Record in very conscientious
spirit l can't truthfully say that he read
1t with avidity, but he ploughed along
through the dull pages. and read lots of the
speeches entire, and while this spell lasted
l couldn't get word out of the man from
the time dinner was finished until bedtime
he was too busy being conscientious by
reading that old Record.
After the first week. however, he began
to tire some of the Record, and while he
still ripped the cover off every night for
week or so, and waded through the stupid
old thing in a perfunctory sort Of way, 1t
was plain that the exercise wasn't cheer
Ing him up much. He had at the begin
ming instructed me to keep all the Records,
as he intended, for some utterly inscruta-
bic reason, to get them bound at the end
OF the session. and so l had started to
stack them up in a neat pile in the bed
room which we use for a reading room at
night. They took up an awful lot of room,
but l didn't mind that-at first. After
about three weeks my husband began to
forget all about asking for the Record at
night, and when I reminded him that he
wasn't reading the Record as he had in
tended. he said, oh, blow the Record! or
some such horrid thing as that. Then 1
wished the postman would stop bringing
1.-THE accumulation Of Recordstmyl how
they did pile up! was bad enough. but 1t
wasn't that feature OF it that minded so
much. 1t was the awful disappointment
the postman came. Before we began get
ting that old Record every morning We
always knew, OF course, when the postman
rang the bell in the morning that he had
a letter for one of u.s. and the pleasurable
excitement of rushing to the front door.
specializing on the way as to which OF
us the letter was for and who had written
1t, was one Of the little delights OF the
But after that Record began to come all
of the sport Of waiting for the postman In
the morning was spoiled.
II knew that the postman would ring the
bell every morning for the Record anyway,
whether he had letter OF not, and SO
gradually began to stop rushing to the
front door, although 1t took me quite
while to get used to the fact that the post
man would ring anyhow on account of that
terrible publication about the doings Of
Congress- And 1t got so that I really be-
l.eve there weren't half as many letters for
us as there had been before the Record be-
gan to come-at any rate 1t seemed so.
Nothing but that dreary Record every
morning. the postman smiling rather cheer
fully every time he handed it in, until
began to think he was always quite glad
when there was no .other mail for US ex-
cept the Record, so that he could enjoy that
cheerful smile of his. After while, when
letter or two did come with the Record,
began to regard it something strange
that anybody should write to us at all. or
that any attention should be paid to us by
anybody except the dreadful man who mail
ed the Congressional Record.
Il asked my husband If l should go on
keeping the Records, and he only said Blow
EN-. again, and SO / began to heap them
up out In the spare room Such huge heap
OF paper they made by the time the long
session was over! But my feminine cupidity
had got to working by the time had about
three months of the Record, and 1 felt sure
that when the session was all over I would
be able to sell the complete copies for some
thing. And so l allowed them to so litter
up the store room that l could hardly
squeeze my way through the door. But as
l saw the heap grow my anticipations grew
with 1t, and l felt certain that i should at
least be able to get a new hat from the sale
of those Records. / had Il all pictured how
pleased and amused my i band would be
when 1 told him how "levs-ly I had dispos-
ed of that pile OF hecords that he had only
thought fit to blow.
well, on the day after the long session
closed / went down to a dealer in second
hand books. / was confident that l be-
lieve that 1 was actually perky in the man.
rer with which l addressed him about those
Records.
How much do you offer me- said /,
for the complete file Of the Congressional
Record from the beginning of the session
to the closing yesterday
THE man looked amused. and my heart
sank bit at the sight of his broad grim
Well he replied I'll tell you what I'll
do, ma'am. I'll send a darkey up to your
house and have 'em taken out for dollar
1T was so funny that l had to laugh In
me that my huge stack Of Records was az
soiutely worthless. and advised me to use
them to light the kitchen stove If I didn't
care to go to the expense of having
chore man carry them out Of the house.
And that" concluded the little house
wife, lis not the worst of it. On Tuesday
morning Of last week when the postman
rang the bell / raced to the front door,
had got into the habit again in the interim