The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1902-09-14
BOY MILO DOES
CRAZY THINGS
Young American Who Doesn't
Do as Romans Do in Rome.
STUNS THE POLICEMEN
BY the Audacity of His Various
Monkey-Shines.

World says:
Just TO see what viii happen. suppose
/ you approach your officer sS6, who
stands, white-gloved and smooth-shayen
to the bleeding point, at Fifth avenue
and Twenty-hfth street. and say:
! ''Onicer. l am about TO drive my fav-
orite horse upstairs three fights 70 my
apartments in the Waldorf-Astoria, and
then, when I am denuded. except as 10
my night-robe, TO rush him through the
rooms in chase Of a pet bird. It is ap-
preaching midnight, I know, but the
laws OF New York cannot prevent me
from doing as I intend. and some over
jealous night clerk or husky porter may
interfere and l want you along 70 see
that l get my rights
The results might be pleasant. but as
TO their status as the basis for interesting
narrative in the morning papers the next
day there can be no question.
The story would be dressed. Of course.
in interesting and imaginative language;
John Jones Cor your name committed
70 Bellevue for examination as 10 his
sanity"
Of course ii you were very dissipsted
scion OF very snobhish family, the story
might not be printed. But in all Ger
tainty. no paper would ever be able TO
chronicle the truth that you had ridden
up three fights of stories of your hotel
on horseback before the policeman had
dubbed you into insensibnity. and then
transferred you 70 straightjaoket doc
tor
AS TO riding your horse through your
apartments and next day. chasing pet
bird in a nightgOwn chat is. OF course
you-not the horse through the field
you would be riding nothing but nag Of
impatience chasing the pet bird Hope
a. applied TO freedom.
No. young man. If you contemplate any
thing OF that kind. II it be your desire
10 go bathing on horseback. or 10 array
Your male cook as the Pontin Of the
Roman church, as to ride your bicycle
over the Palisades. or 10 encardine your
epirdermis and pose in public as a Wild
Indian AT the head OF a number Of equally
wild associates. do 1t either in town
where college students are celebrating
on that particular night or-go 70 Rome.
For in Rome they have no laws prohib-
iting you doing such things. True they
have gendarmes, or the Roman equiva-
lent, whose perquisite is hard looks. in
suits and a reminder. when they Try
70 do their duty that there is no law
to back them up.
So in Rome you may ride your horse
upstairs to the twenty-third story OF the
Altieri Palace Tin case it has twenty
but the horse can complain.
Rome. All, Rome. We had always be-
lieved that foreign artists sought you
and wrote about you for your blue skies,
purple sunsets and other things like that.
But nov we see what your charm has
been. II was the desuetude Of your gen
carmes the absence OF your laws. the
the chance of Americans which they cant
get at home.
All OF which we base on the exploits
OF one Herbert Haseltine. son Of the IA
nous American painter. and himself an
OF so much repute that his name in Rome
Il not in New York. makes people de-
clare that he is a promising individual
For II Herbert Haseltine athlete though
he be. can do such things in Rome why
cannot Johnny Jones. the next scholar
ship winner that goes abroad. duplicate
his achievements and thus uphold the
reputation Of Americans abroad as a
fIee-booting. Iaw-defyinE race
Possibly because there are few Herbert
Haseltines.
This Young gentleman has achieved the
repute q being the highest-rolling Amerf-
can outside q those who loop the loop.
His life abroad has been one continuous
hurly-burly. II We are to believe reports.
and among his achievements have b~en
those which We have asked You % pro
pose doing IN the absence OF a New York
policeman
Haseitine IS a handsome young man.
and apart from his eccentric actions on
Roman ground. IS an American ~ culture
and refinement. with an inherent talent
for art But she stories of his escapsdes
would read ike Action did not his friends
in New York know him for what be is.
a wonderful athlete o. 80 in6epe1dsnt
turn - mind that Re- enjoys Eetting
The better % The feeble Roman city
guards by his bravaso ard Of opening
TIE eyes % All the nsighsors BY he
feats % athlete daring
Among his recent escspades are sor1e
curious ones
The lovely rfls in which Hazeiuae
lives which bears the name y The noted
American scuirfor. story. an intimate
friend snd chum ~ the Young pairter
vas long aeo selected - the fed for MS
most daring exploits
II + beautifully lad out along the
shores % Fora S1ora near Porto
d.Ario. ard r. r. not an UNCOMMON siEh-
RI -ee Hazeitiae rfslnE horse breast
deep IN The water To- niles ard hourz az
q tine 81 fuu yea - rs ar1ussd s-ie-ss
and 70 ths auzzerseat q re Ronan
Poprlzee
= Ire heids Esssitlns g. also x1r.
- rfde e rght vh~n re rooz shi1sz
- 49, q his beloved h1rse RiEoi etto. (
viii 10 thicker rafsasnf 81 sssrn ia
athlete franz thar a -lrat cow. cazs- /
ia zbout a trained BIRD zAieh . c1n-
staztfT eiu9fzE rs v.gslkro-
Bazsltire has . courss & cors-s- /
Cd mar Eho bars a x;-flcrz r-se-s- /
lls1cs % r. ~e-e-sH.e Por.- l1 - !
younger dzFs-znd this cox hss ofssu /
seez dressed e Fa1i1cisf ruhes q rs5r~- /
sszt Leo XIII. ard =rsdeniy gsseree is,a |
tAe p-eselrs q - srtssts E-estz @ |
her srez. zzzs<7ect AID a5sEescr.s4ass |