Omaha daily bee., 1902-04-02
FOOL KILLER TAKES DAY OFF
Otherwise he Would Demand Extra Pay
for Heavy Work.
AHTEDuUvlAN Jokes ARE STILL POPULAR
II Remains for ResourcefuI Messenger
Boy TO Invent sOmethins New
In shape of Trap for
His Fellows.

Yesterday was the one day out Of the year
when the overworked fcol killer takes a
vacation. and the practical Joker may in
woke an unwrittenl law to protect him from
the consequences Of his folly. Hundreds
IN omaha yesterday claimed this ex-
emption. The young we're especially alert
60 take advantage OF the privilege and
school teacherp we're thanking their lucky
stars that the spring vacation was on.
Since early morning old hats found
their way 10 conspicuous places In
the middle Of the sidewalk, to invite the
tender toes Of the absent-mlnded, and
those who accepted the Invitation are in q
position to testify that the bricks concealed
underneath are hard enough for paving pur-
poses. This is a hoary, antedlluvian joke.
but no April Fools day Is complete " tn
out II. Then there is the bundle OF old
rags done up to represent q parcel fresh
from the department store, the hot coin
nailed to the floor and the fat pocketbook
with the boy at the other end Of the str ng
All these have for ages contributed to the
gaiety Of nations and are so old as TO be
regarded as settled institutions, like Easter
eggs and Fourth Of July hreerackers.
Messenger Boys Brisht Idea.
The playful housewife baked flannel cakes
for her spouse yesterday and the mis-
ehievous boy put salt In the sugar bowl.
These will be recognized as old friends.
But once in a while someone invents a new
Joke, or at least one that is less generally
used. For example, here is one conceived
by q bright mind In o Farnam street mes
Benger once:
A lad reported for duty yesterday with
q box. In the lid OF which had been bored
an auger hole. A moment later he Dor
rowed q companions pocket knife and
pretended to drop It In the hole. The
owner. OF course. thrust his finger In the
hole TO get II; there was a snap; the un-
fortunate lad gave a yell of pain, but
couldn't withdraw the member; 1t was Sc
curely held in the meshes OF a mouse trap
which had been fastened to the under side
Of the lid. This ingenious device was kept
busy all day. Each new boy as he re-
turned from q trip was introduced to its
mysteries.
'Fattie' Fisher. a newsboy, went 10 sleep
on a box near Fifteenth and Farnam
streets. and several OF his co-workers got
a bottle Of red ink and decorated his face
with biotches. They then woke him and
held n hand mirror while he studied his
physiognomy. He was angry at frst, but
ne was soon able to turn his pr%edicament
into profit. for a travelling man who was
in the crowd looking on gave 'Fattie'' SO
cents to 60 up to the ONCE Of the Board
Of Health and pass himself OF as a small
POI patient.
A mail carrier started out yesterday
with a large. heavy package addressed TO
A. p. Rilphool, 1882 Cunning street. At
noon he brought 1t back to the postofhce
to say that he had canvassed all that part
Of town. but could ind no one Of the name
of Rilphool. While the others were laugh
ing someone divided the name for him thus.
April Phool."
Works on Imagination.
Patsey Havey. at the police station, says
he drank a glass OF water at the break
fast table that was 80 cold Il made his
teeth ache, but discovered later that what
he had mistaken for q big lump Of ice was
nothing more than q chunk OF melted win
dow glass a member OF his family had
picked up at the scene of a recent fire.
A young married attorney Of irreproach-
able private life found a square envelope OF
lavender hue in his mail yesterday. He
wss Just in the act of opening it when he
heard his wifes voice in the next room, 90
thrust Il under the blotter on his desk.
What makes you look so guilty" she
said, entering. "In bet you've been get
ting q letter from some grill"
He ayowed innocence, but she made q
felnt OF searching for the letter. and finally
produced II from beneath the hlotter. She
pretended to be heart-broken.
I'll convince you that II lie nothing
dear" he said, tearing II open.
The words. April fool" written in let
ters three inches high, stared him In the
face. Just as his Office associates burst In tC
give him the laugh.
While all this was going on printers were
I sending their devils TO neighboring print
shops to borrow left-handed shooting sticks
telegraph operators were sending ~acrostiC
messages and druggists were having the. 1
assistants MI prescriptions that read. "R
Loot Lirpa, 2 o."