The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-08-16

Alfred Hemenway of Boston. the law
partner OF ex-Secretary Long. tells this
story "A poorly dressed woman sat
alone in railway station Attention was
called TO her by man who exclaimed:
here poor woman who has no ticket
10 her destination. I'll chip in 10 cents
a hatful Of coin and announced. She
mas more than her fare, but not enough
that Again he made the rounds and
again announced: she ought to have a
bonnet. III chip in half a dollar for the
bonnet When he made the rounds the
third time a newcomer entered the sta
ton, shook hands heartily with the wo-
man. and, turning TO the philanthropist.
SAID; WY Hiram, I'm glad TO see you
one of the contributors. is that woman
Your wife, Yes. drawled the philan-
thrOpist. What right have you rs collect
What right have 1 TO collect money for
any other fellows wife, was the retort
that closed the debate
Indianapolis Sentinel: At a recent meet
ing OF the board of charities and correc-
lions one of the members called attention
that were laid at the door OF Christian
Science DR.. John V. Shoemaker, who
was present. was asked If he thought It
really possible that a cure could be ef-
fected by the doctrine. In reply he told
the story of boy who encountered a
Christian Scientist and was asked:
I1OW Is your
Fathers feeling bad and complains
very much Of his health replied the boy.
Nonsense. commented the Christian
Scientist. He only thinks he's III. Tell
him that the next time he complains. Tell
him he only thinks he's H.
Two OF three days later they met again
and the Christian Scientist asked:
How is your father today"
Father-father thinks he's dead, sir"
replied the boy, hesitatingiy.
q
class of an uptown Sunday school was
recently asked by his teacher If he knew
who made him-one of the formal ques-
tons always asked the younger pupils.
you don't KNOW exclaimed the teach
err Why. you should be ashamed of
yourself. There's your little brother Dick,
tell''
well, so he ouehter,', Indignantly re-
torted the S-year-old. -''Taint so long
since he was made"
Philadelphia Times; A local Episcopal
congregation takes a great interest in 4
day nursery for babies that is run as a
part of the organized charity 81 the
church Mothers going out to Hork or
having other reasons for intrusting chill
dren to the care of the nursery for the
day receive a numbered brass check cor
responding to tag hung each baby.
The nursery, located in a working folks
IS very popular WITH all
classes and denominations, the charge be-
ing merely nominal. At a recent Wednes-
day evening service in the church the pas
tor told the congregation that the day
before strange woman had left her
baby, returned in the afternoon. asked
for her child. and was refused because
she had lost her check. The matron in
charge would take no chances, but told
the woman 10 come around later when,
IL there were an unclaimed baby remaffl-
ing, she could have it. The woman called
only baby left was a negro. Here the
tons Of OH What a shamet' Dread
FUR Poor woman" etc, from the
feminine members Of his congregation.
Il forgot to explain" he went on, after
a moment, that the mother, too, was
black
g g .
Philadelphia Times; A lawyer who has
won some distinction through his success
in compromising suits for damages by
accident, says his most interesting client
was Swedish farmer from Delaware
county, whose wife had been killed here
in philadelphia by a train crossing the
streets at grade.
and, having been told that he could get
s10.00e If he insisted on pushing the case,
refused for months 10 talk of compromise
The lawyer of course did all possible to
keep the hearing back, in the hope of
discouraging the Swede: and at last he
was rewarded by an offer to settle at a
FtdSoNdDfe figure
The Swede called. the lawyer said $500,
and the bereaved one quickly accepted.
AS he folded the check and pocketed IL
he observed.
VET. fCdeed not do so .padIee, I hat.
got fir heondred tollar and a goot teal
better wife than 1 had before. She and
me was married yesterday"
o @ 9
Indianapolis Sentinel: A young woman
whose father was ambitious for her social
success in life recently took it on herself
to inform him that she loved a. young
clerk in his office-a good. upright. am
bilious fellow, but at present without
means-and that she had promised to be-
come his wife.
How far has this thing gomez" de-
manded the surprised father.
We'll, we've been seeing each other on
the quiet for over a year. pa she said.
And he's kissed you-eh?"
Yes, pa" she admitted, hanging her
head.
How often? How often, I say?'' the
old man roared-
Her head hung no longer. She drew
herself up to her full height. and, facing
him with flashing eyes, replied:
Father, 1 came here TO confess-not to
boasti'