The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1902-09-12

Every single one:
Hardly any years have they.
Hardly any cares;
l:ur in every lovely thing
MultimillionaireS.
Youths Companion.
The New Elucation.-My friend was
tea, hing the primary class in 4 city Sun
day school. The lesson was the story OF
! the wandering lslacllteS, who were mi
! raculously fed upon mamma.
Il don't KNOW she said. in a soft
aside t" me. Just what mamma looks like,
bur have this little bottle OF homoe-
opathic pills for an illustration" taking
from her pocket tiny phial and shaking
| it lightly.
She made the story Interesting. and
every little face was turned upward eX
the cloud by day and the pillar Of fire by
| night. the coming or the quailS and the
fall of mamma, then rapidly reviewed til:
| whole. asking questions to test the atten-
! ton OF her ::ndicnc".
And what did the Lord feed the chill
'lrrn Of l>'ael upon:" she asked.
pills" they all shouted without Il dis
| >rnting voice.
rhcn. TO- 4 moment. there was silence.
while the teacher bent low, to look into
her rcricult after something which was
rot to be fonnd.-Harper's Magazine.
Sir augustus Lackcash Ito tailcr>--My
son tells me that YOU have allowed him
t" run Il bill for three years. have,
Sir Augustus, there is really no hurry.
Sir Augustus Lackcash--I know that.
! and. therefore, l have come to tell you
that IN future | want to get my clothes
from YOU. too.-Tit-Bits.
-:O:-
EFF YOU please. suh.'' said the old
Georgia darkey to the rural justice, II
wants you 70. ter gimme vorce fun my
OF CONAN"
WHY said the justice, 'that's out OF
my jurisdiction. | have no power to
grant divorces.'
Didn't YOU marry me, subj"
"Yes-I think l did,
We'll, sub, after you get me inter de
| trouble. hit pears reasonable dat you
orter stir yo'se'f ter git me outen it
don't it,
"Rut-what's the trouble"
''Dev amt no trouble tall, sub, 'cep'
DIES dis: Sence had call ter preach,
an spell er de unlimited rheumatism,
hcz been pertickler fond err takin' my
ease, en- pears lax de Of .ooman don't
| want ter rise Ell make Il livin' fer ME;
| en it come ter me dat eff l wuz 'vorccd
by law. de jedge would make her gimme
! Il years support, en- pay me halleluia
money right erlongv'-Atlanta Constitu-
| ton.
CaSsdy-Oi thought he swore to right
| 1reland'S wrongs.
Casey-Thrue for We; so he did.
Cassidy-But he's not on the sthump
| amy more.
Casey-No; he's writin' Il histhory av
| Ireland now. He fought that the fastest
| way to write her wrongs.-Philadelph
Record.
II suppose said the visitor who was
being shown through the newspaper office,
THAT the red-faced, rough-looking indi-
:idual who, is lounging on the desk over
there is the Jp',erson who writes the
| NO" answers the guide. ''That de-
partment is written by lady"
And that slender consumptive-ap-
nearing man over there-doesn't he write
the guides to health?''
| WHY, no; practising physician does
that
| But surely that prizefghter who is
smoking Il cob pipe is the society editor?''
Wrong again; the society page is
handled by young woman of great gen
tility."
''And that-look here. young fellow.
Don't you try to fool me. l guess l know
| about newspapers. I have read all about
/ how they are edited in the funny papers.
| I don't believe this is a newspaper office
at all.'-Baltimore Herald.
| Wife Ito her husband -Arthur, love, l
| want YOU to give John Il good scoldinc
| tomorrow morning.
Husband-What for? I am perfectly
satisfied with the fellow.
! oil 1,o t,1, 10
carpets tomorrow, and he strikes ever 50
much harder when he's in a bad temper.
| Former Judge Campbell, president of
the board Of city trusts, was walking up
and down Chestnut street, between Broad
and Juniper, one recent evening. awaiting
the arrival OF a friend, when his atten-
ton was attracted by the eccentric loco
street from Market. He crawled along
the wall of the old mint for few yards,
and then plunged headlong across the
street, bringing up with jolt against an
awning pole in front of Wanamaker's,
and carroming against the westernmost
window Of that store. Then he zigzagged
across Chestnut street, and, steadyiny
himself against the boarded-up entrance
OF the Garrick theater: asked the Judge
with fine assumption of polite dignity:
! IL beg par-jardon, shir; but [hic!]-
out cOuldSn YOU tell NINE II thlSll lSl-
if thish iSh CHESTNUT street or-or ish it
Wednesday, ?"-Philadelphia Times.
They had dispute, and agreed to
leave it to the military expert. what
bullet" they asked, do you consider the
dealiest?'' For several minutes he re-
NAMED in brown study. Then he looked
up with the air of one who had settled
the matter and finally and definitely.
THE one that hts he said.-Tit- Bits.
\ very few years have suficed to H.
corporate ''hooligan" into the English
language. Its use without capita! III"
is the seal of it's fit and proper worth
and Il sign that the word has come to
stay. But it is to be hoped that the
pests 50 named will be speedily eradi-
Gated, even as the kindred word ioodlum
in the American voca bulary has survived
the rufian who gave it BIRTH Thirty
years ago the California cities were IT,
tested by gangs of roughs, as London is
today. The leader of the Frisco ruftians
was one Muldoon; and an inventive re-
porter, casting round for word to de-
scribe them, hit upon the idea of invert-
ing the name, and dubbed them mood
1 TT|J.-