The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1902-04-08
} HER GIANT
! FOLDING BED
! By c. B. LOOMS ....
Copyright. 1901, by c. H. Loomi.

OV<rVNSV>tVtsrVtf~tJ>S VsSVtSVO0OVO~S
1t was against Mr. Bentleys advice
that Cora bought the giant folding bed.
They lived on the sixth floor in small
five rooms and a Understandable
| all-imprOvements" fat, and he said
that such huge folding bed was out
of all proportion to the size of the bed
room. But Mrs. Bentley had set her
heart on it, and Mr.. Bentley has not
been husband so long as to feel like
thwarting any legitimate wish.
! When she went down to the store,
she found she was just in time to get
one at half price. What lucki She had
expected to pay $35 for the bed, and
she got it at $25, although by what
process Of arithmetic twenty-five be-
comes the half of thirty-five she did
not stop to inquire
But with the reduced price of the
bed her good luck ended, and she en-
tered upon a chapter of annoyances
that would have made the bed dear as
| a gratuity.
The bed people were just moving out
and were too busy to send the bed
home. Five separate expressmen re-
fused to stir their wagons when they
learned that it was giant. She began
to wish that 1t was trundle bed But
at last an expressman who was just
starting In business and who was
therefore inexperienced contracted for
| 81 to deliver it,
She reflected that the salesman had
told her that it was very convenient
size, as one side of the room did not
need to be papered when the bed was
up, for it took up the entire wall space
So she went and waited for the bed
with all the ardor of a small child
Every time the dumb waiter blew she
ran out to see if they were trying to
send it up that way, but when it final
ly arrived after a wait of four hours
it came In at the front door.
After ten minutes or SO Mrs. Bentley
heard mastodonic footsteps on the
| stairs, the swish Of tearing wall paper,
the crash Of falling globes, and she
knew that they were bringing the bed
up stairs. So did all the other fiat
jewellers. When she looked over the
staircase, there were from three to
four heads beneath her. all looking
| down.
The arrival at different landings was
punctuated by the crash of glass and
the fall Of plaster. And on the third
floor the bed fell on one of the men.
Luckily he was fat German, and he
escaped with barked shin and mis-
laid temper.
Long before that there was a string
Of home returning heads of families
separated from their little ones by the
Chinese wall Of bed Those who
were athletic enough climbed over and
escaped to their apartments, but the
rest had to content themselves with
throwing kisses to their beloved ones
and telling them not to despair.
Mrs. Bentley had not hitherto known
there were so many people living in
the house. The stairs were black with
them, and the bed moved with the de-
liberation of glacier
When the men reached the fourth
1 AAOOAf thCJ NAdl1OA CO LOI OCCIs anu NILS.
Bentley, being inexperienced, sent for
two bottles, which were brought in by
the janitor's son.
The two men sat down, or, rather, up,
way up. on the bed and opened bottle
apiece amid groans from the belated
fat jewellers who lived above the third
1t is probable that they had already
laced themselves with beer, for they
became very merry and loquacious aft
er the bottles had been emptied, and
many Of their jokes would not have
been allowed at variety theater
There is saying that there is al
ways room at the top. This did not
prove to be the case in regard to the
giant bed. The hallway at the top fiat
was a joint affair, two suits opening
on it, and it was the narrowest in the
building. When the men finally arriv-
ed with their tremendous load, they
found that it was going to be Chinese
puzzle to get into Mrs. Bentley's. They
shattered. the last globe and then sat
down on the stairs to ponder.
They finally came to the conclusion
that they could not get 1t in unless the
door of the opposite apartment were
opened to admit of its being slowed
around.
Mrs. Cochran was the opposite neigh
Dor. She and Mrs. Bentley had been
as distant as such contiguous fiat
jewellers could be. Their bows in the
hall were as icy as the hall itself Mrs
Cochran thought Mrs. Bentley a fool
ish little new wife. and Mrs. Bentley
thought Mrs. Cochran common.
Still, there was nothing for it but to
ask Mrs. Cochran to open her front
door and let the man swing the bed
into the doorway for just one moment.
The fat man rang her bell. She open
ed the door. with fire in her eyes She
had been trying to get the youngest to
sleep, and the constant humping and
crashing and the objurgations and
beery laughter of the expressmen had
rolled the not too placid waters of her
disposition to a foaming point
Mrs. Cochran glowered
| "Ohr said Mrs Bentley, with a has
tily made veneer Of sweetness MAY
the men just swing the bed into your
hallway so that they can get 1t into my
doorway? l didn't suppose it was so
big. don't think It was so big in the
store
Mrs. Cochran shifted at the inanity
of the remark. but she said:
"Oh. suppose can't refuse.
hope you'll quit your humping after
you get 1t in. can't get my child to
sleep while it's going on"
I'm sure it will only be a minute.
You see. the worst Is over"
81 should hope So" said Mrs. Coch-
ran, looking at the dents In the wall
and the broken globes. And then the
two expressmen put their shoulders to
the bed and swung it into the doorway
with such vehemence that it stuck
like fat cork in small bottle and re-
fused to bGGNe.
well, this is a pretty state of
things" said Mrs. Cochran from be-
hind the bed. How do you suppose
were going to close our front door
with that great bed In the way?"
you Won't need to close it No one
viii come in While der bet is dere. 1t is
besser as a door" And the German
| laughed uproariousIy and fatty.