New-York tribune., 1902-10-02
TIE TALK or THE D4T.

A correspondent writes thus % The London
Truth "T nave been travelling IN Germany. and
since my return have paid several short visits 10
friends IN the country. Wherever have been have
met nothing bur iuvalids. men and women. who
complain OF their health and eagerly describe their
symptoms. u has occurred 70 that a news
paper called symptoms should achieve enor-
nous success IN this the million and one real
or Imaginary irvau5s could describe their different
aches and pains. and By comparison discover what
maIa5ies they are suffering from Prizes might be
given Tor the best prescriptions. while symptom
Tszz.es' should prove enormously entertaining. \
new gar~e OF conn leations' might also be elab-
GRATED. and a valuable prize awarded at the end
os the quarter 20 the subscriber who should com
pose the most interesting scheme OF concerted all
r.ars. A the readers would provide all the lit
erary matter. there would only be the cost OF pro
duct1n and distribution deal with. and We
are an invalds now. advertisers would ind II in
GispeasahIe 10 secure space in a paper which
would be welcomed IN every household"
THE BREAKFAST FOOD FAMILY.
John SPratt will eat no fat
Nor giA he touch the lean,
rte lives upon Foodne.
BUT Mrs. spratt win none Of that:
Ot ESpursated Wheat
To William spratt that food Is rat
His favorire feed-ais special need
IL Eata Heals oats
But sister I4l amt see how ,wr
As breakfast fare IT. can't compare.
she says. with shredded Wood
Now. more ~ these Ieander please:
He feeds upon Bath Mitts
While sister Jane improves her brain
With Cero-Grapo-Grits
I.ycureus votes Tor Fathers Oats;
IroSginv appeals 70 May.
The junior John suHsists upon
UE,,d4 Bayla Hay
Corrected 20; r Wheat at f25 H6, ntts ts,i Pete; P,,
TOE Ga 45a4t Tale s2TstsE 2TstE 4 Ney45Ias Ta5nf fat
-(Chicaso Tribune
South African correspondent tells how clev-
ery the BOsr Commandant. Kritzinger. made use
Of his knowledge OF English IN the recent war.
ON one occasion he galloped up 20 a oiockhouse
and declared that he was In command OF couple
or squadrons OF MarshaITs Horse and VS. being
hotIy pursued by kritznger himself So well did
no tell his story that the blockhouses actually
held up the advance Of the pursuing column OF
English with a heavy fire. Riding up one evening
10 bIuckhOuse. dressed IN an EnslSh captains
costume and attended BY two orderlies. he an
uoUuced that the column to which ne was attached
would pass through at midnight on night mareh'
and they were on 10 account 10 fire on II. lie So
Iectod the spot at which he would cross and in
sisted absolute silence being observed l
think We have Krtzinger cornered now ne re-
marked chceriy. And so 'elp me-. said the crest
fallen uon-commIssioued officer next morning
when he found out mis- mistake. IF didn't salute
i'm. and the men give i'm cheer as e rode ON
In a Bloemfontein journal appears the following
''''' SECOND EDITION.
APOLOGY.
A series Of accidents has unfortunately neces-
STATED an apology for the non-appearanee OF the
Whi5h, 10 say the least of it, is very Irish-GOn-
don Express
\ writer i'm ''Harper's Weekly" tells some stories
os Henry Iabouchere when he vas IN the dipio-
matte service
II is sail that he was once sent by the British
Minister at Washington 20 look after some irish
couple Of hours before he found mis- way TO gam,
E den and "is IirlP&a & o5 oI m h. o STy 6ay eII ee -
iUs Ou the Common and wdshing In ihe bay; Then
] ordered Thoroughly satisfying din
uer The walters were al! irish. and he noticed
they seemed % he examining him pretty closely.
Renenberu- what his official business was and
ttat he hadn't a cent in his pocket. 'Lahby' was
as near teegs as u h ers RoSSlei1 bs ai1 fos
beyond r-proach and the service miracle OF speed
oigarttts tHe waters Were standing round him in
crowds. At last one Of them leaned over ana said.
Me1eRere' .IIasf"' said 'Labby." looking round
boldly up the desk To pay H. But the proprietor
was an 'Irshman and would rot hear Of 1t Il. He
afterwSrd ..for the honor had done him in pat
roniZing his poor hosqeIy ana tSheo 70 ne aIlo%ea
with the air of naughty gloom peculiar to exiled
parrots
THE Providence Journal" hnds three college
graduates on the Connecticut Democratic State
ticket cary Of Princeton. Hubbard. Of Trinity.
and Cummings. Of Yale. and only two on the Re
publican state ticket. Roberts, of Yale. and King.
OF Amherst The Journal adds: In other
words OF the fourteen men nominated by these two
conventions only five hold college degrees II is
worth while 70 note such facts. because they have
direct bearing on the relation Of our colleges to
American public life
THE SEASON
There once was a fulback who hunted
For trouble anS got all he wanted;
For he started 10 fool
With a government mule
His tombstone reads simply: "Outpuntec-"
-(CathoIc Standard and Times.