BoletiÌn mercantil de Puerto Rico. (San Juan, P.R.) 18??-1918, 1902-01-08
SAN JUAN, JANUARY 8
The Progress OF
the Gusher,
Or Some Reflections Upon the
Progress Of Local Journalism By
the Sage Of the Antilles.


apologies to Annancy) there was chaos in
the land. On the face OF the earth, in the
waters belos the earth, and as tar up IN
the sky as the eye could reach there wss
chaos, chaos, chaos, excepting 10 one little
fair spot, the favored of the Gods where
dwelt the Sage Of the Antilles. And this
hallowed spot, the reflector OF all the intel
lgence, the wisdom, and the order OF the
world was called in those days Tetuan
Street. And every day this wise and learn
I'd man who was believed 10y bimself) to be
the source Of all knowledge, would discourse
on the evils of bis fellow men, on the ignor
ance of the world and on the duplicity Of
imitation ssges who were attempting to
take from him the glory OF being the real
untained thing, the genuine article. And
one day mighty in his anger, this wise man
full of wrath arose and addressed the people:
GIL! III, WE!WE! WEI, do not
mean two OF US by the term we, l make
use Of the editorial We, for other than this
there is no we. For months you unsophis
ticated, ingorant and unfortunate beings Of
this unhappy earth have been regaled by
the attempts Of imitation sages to poisi0n
your minds against the wisdom, the erudi
ton and the oil important teachings Of we,
1 mean the editorial we, for there is only
one we, and that sce 10 now, acas yesterday,
and will be to morrow, yes forever and a
day, the only ace." frightened into assent
by the terrible working of the old maL's
jaws, the people awed into silerce waited
for the old Sage 10 continue. "And to prove
: to you that there is only one real genuine
we, that there is only one sage, only one
bunch of soisdom on this unfortunate earth
we, shall proceed to enumerate to your
impotent minds list Of the sCisd0ms and
virtues Which ace have taught to you during
the past year"
ssFirs!, s0e shall tell you Of the day when
we wrote in our official organ the EsDu, the
book OF naked learning, that the Judges OF
the Supreme Court OF Porto r co should be
lmpeachsd, and the very next day did 70 not,
by most skillful piece of detective work ad
ministered or acccDpl shed, by one OF the
slavisb servants of we, discover by reason OF
our remarkable wisdom, that they should not
be impeached, and did We not the very MEX,
day write few bunches of wisdom sDt.tled
sRandom Chargesn and contradict every.
thing we had said the day before, and if
here is q sage on earth that can repeat such
Q performances We, that is tke same we,
hope must not too often remind you Of the
we 1 refer to, will retire from the field OF
WISDOM "Again was it we, OF was it
these other would be Sagss, who accused
the Attorney General of Psrto Rico Of :
ure to perform bis duties in not prevent
log bar room brswls, which, we, happened
to discover because Of our presence every
where, IL the spirit"
"Again We, reler to the same We, ask
you who II was that awoke you one morning
10 discover that We Who had betn Rspub
licans before, had turned Fedsrals, and We
AK you 10 there Sage in the world who can
woIk successfully such surpriss for you as
No worked, aud even to- day our list Of lis.
teners 10 80 great, and ths party lines are 80
equal xhat We are counting up numbers to
zee whether we cannot furLish JON another
surprise b. becoming Republicans. And ss,
rigat here desire 10 info m you, that Ne
believe hat 70 the vicfsrs belong sue spoils,
and Ne will abide ~ The voice Of the msjar-
ity, and us 70 show yeu hou fair and last
We ere. II eur number oi snbEcdoers shes .
msjzrify smougst any enc parts we, sAsll
b q hat party. We ssk pea b there anf
other Sac uho win deal thaa ikir.y b. yor.'
sad Ag,i, us sak 200 uko nss Il ia q
prsIlelsd nat .Ihe 0srmaa boat uonid
ssms 70 psrt, rAo wss 4 tat prxd'cfsf iAsl
lxI<s|ss wEs fns i<IIoa. uho waa Il thai
prsilci<i thzt las Gossfsor sres.l uisk ~
ui4I1m a ne. Ha4 pfostd u n tIs mesasxr.
Mho was Y sA&l siiessd ne a<szr.&ry ei|
k1f1s Nlso - sxres with ~, ws teIkvs ~
rea1s<cezsIra, Nae was b taet x<xs sea
80 sse Psshs.,sn 1. ssEzst = - pssskaas