davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1902-11-08
NOT A coNsoLING THOUGHT.

Sympathy May Have Been Welt
Meant, but Was Not Effective.
The late Dr. Herman c.. Riggs of
Rochester, pastor Of St Peters, did
not enjoy a popular reputation as
humorist, but he had some dignit1edi
fun in his composition and regarded
with very little patience those whose;
piety found expression in deprecating
the sinfullness of the times, says the
New York Times. One day a lugu-
brious elder, temperamentally q pessi-
mist and usually bore, said to him:t
Doctor, the tendencies of the
times are indeed deplorable. The
longer l live the worse the world
seems to become
DR.. Riggs replied: my dear sir,
the fact is undoubtedly as you have
observed, but perhaps you exagger--
ate the relation which it would seem
to establish between cause and effect
However, I would not let that worry
me too much, since you may be able,
to derive some consolation from the
thought that perhaps the world will
be better when you are out of it.''
. The longer the elder pondered this
reply the less satisfaction was he
able to derive from it. ;: :,
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1902-11-08
IludicrOuS Tales Told
Of the Sar@aSS0 Sea.

Probably no portion of the globes
surface has afforded richer field for
the imaginative writer than the Sar-
gasso sea, that portion of the Atlantic
ocean lying between 16 and SO degrees
north latitude and 80 and so degrees
west longitude. ~~.
During the recent Spanlsh-Amerfcan
war some OF the newspaper reporters,
sending their imaginations soaring
Wildly over the Sargasso sea, met
stranger visions than did Milton in
Paradise or Dante in the depths of In
ferno. A Boston daily contained an
article anticipating the naval battle
that occurred at Santiago. The au.
thor, giving free rein to his fancy,
said:
The battle will be fought on the
northern edge Of that strange and
mysterious part Of the Atlantic called
the SargassO sea. 1t is not generally
known that within weeks sail from
New York is a vast and trackless
waste, unexplored by the hardest sail
ors, uncrossed by the stateHest ships,
q monster mass Of floating debris,
consisting of growing seaweed, bloom
ing and blossoming plants, creeping
and twining vines, q float island OF
verdure almost as large as the state of
Texas, forming solid barrier against
navigation. The Spanish com
mander will very likely use this mass
OF floating sod to protect his hanks
and rear from attack" 1t is incredi.
bic that paper would print such ludi,
crous trash that the merest school
child would at once recognize as ut
terly false.
Another Boston daily copied from
the Buffalo Commercial this most ab
surd account of barque in passage
from Rosario to Philadelphia during
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1902-11-08
Home Assimilation.

r ! @l'"We,' 4 says the explorer, as he en-
deavors to make the cannibal chief
tain understand why his country Is
to be annexed, have no desire except
to benevo1ently assimilate YOU : i. IL e. E
Huh" !" replies the cannibal chief
tain. $50 far as. we, personally, are
concerned, our assimila lating processes
are in good repair. We have assimi-
lated two missionaries and four sail
crs within the past year. I guess
We will do about all the assimilating
that needs to be done on this island !,
And the explorer was led around
the back way to the tpantr Baltl.
more American.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1902-11-08
FOUR OF A KIND.
Bill Of Fare That Failed to Suit Fas-
tidious Diner.

Bill Of Fare That Failed to Suit Fas-
tfdious Diner.
A man "Down East" sojourned for a
few days at reasonably cheap board
ing house in the city.
He became tired of the monotony
Of the table fare and complained to a
rewly made acquaintance. His friend
told him of another boarding house
which he thought would just suit, and
stated that they served four kinds of
meat daily, and every day.
The Down-easter made the change
and after few days trial OF the new
splace changed again. .,
81 TIE friend who had recoznmended
the house inquired in astonishment
why he had left it.
Didn't like the fare" was the
answer.
Didn't they give you four kinds of
meat day, as told you they
would?"
eyes,
''Well, then, what was the matter?
Wasn't that enough?"
Enough, l guess; but I didn't like
the kinds
What were they?'
Ram, lamb, sheep meat and NUT,
ton. New York Times.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1902-11-08
A Man, 4 Girl and a Cable.
BY BISHOP HOWARD.


[Copyright, 1902. by Daily Story Pub. Coy
Theodore Van Aldine was a lucky
dog. AT least everybody said SO, and
what everybody says is true, according
to an old saw. But old saws some
times miss fire in this practical work
a-day world, with it's ever-changing
conditions. And, truth be told, The0-
dore Van Aldine did not possess half
so keen appreciation of his inherent
luck as the great world about him In
sisted upon. True he was the child
of wealth; true, he had never known
: care; true, his pockets had always
bulged with money and no wish had
been ungratified. And right there was
the trouble. When one can have ones
hearts desire at all times and places,
it pals on one and interest in life and
affairs dies out. At least it had so
proven with Van Aldine. He had al
ways been fed on the daintiest of fare,
been clothed in the finest of raiment,
driven the fastest horses, led the CO.
tillion at the swellest balls, been fav-
'ored by the most beautiful maidens,
owned the fastest yachts-in short,
had had the very cream and pick of
the good things of the world.
But he was not happy. In fact he
WAS distinctly discontented and miser-
liable. At % he has tasted all there Is
to life, from the standpoint of the SEN
sualist and the epicure, and had found
1T after all to be a bore.
He was a c1ean-cut, well-equipped
young fellow, was Van Aldine, and
born to- an. humble estate, where he
would have been compelled to work
out his own salvation might have
carved outaa great career-6r have
been the founder of a great fortune
as had been his paternal grandfather,
with the Dutch blood and thrift.
But; the tates had willed otherwise,
and he had been born to purple and
fine linen, with care only to perserve
the family pride and act always the
gentleman. And this came so natural
that no effort was required and the
consequence was that the boy had
never been permitted to put forth ef-
fort enough to interest him in exist
enee.
And he had tired Of it all-the lux
ury and the conventionalities and had
become moody and and'discontented-ev
to the point of seriously considering
the Ilosing; of:his: identity and enlisting
for service in the Philippines or for
service with THE Beers in South Al
rica. In this frame OF mind he flung
himself onto "a cable car to get away
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1902-11-08
Remarkable Story of
a Vegetarian Cat

The vegetarian cat owned by Tom
my Magruder of Newark is in clover
just now. Everything on the little
Belleville avenue farm, where the cat
and Tommy both live, is at it's best
and the cat does not miss much that
is ripening except the bell peppers,
tomatoes and celery. These she does
not like, but eats lettuce, cabbage and
green corn raw, with avidity, says
the New York Sun.
She prefers her corn husked, but
will husk it herself in a rough way if
it is left where she can get at 1t.
"Woozy,"" as the, boys call her, has
never been known to climb corn
stalk to get an ear, but. she is seen
every day nipping parsley and lettuce.
and few days ago she was caught
eating into a growing cabbage. Sue
cotash is one of her favorite dishes,
but she is fond Of cooked string beans,
warm or cold. ST. ~ ~ 81 e. s;rt 7
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1902-11-08
Toilet Of a Lady Ant.

"A naturalist has been making OBJ.
servations on the toilets of certain
ants, and has discovered each insect
goes through most elaborate ablu-
tions.
They are not only performed by
herself, but by another, who acts
for the time as lady's maid. The
assistant starts by washing the face
Of her companion, and then goes over
the whole body.
The attitude of the ant that is being
washed is one Of intense satisfaction.
She lies down with all her limbs
stretched loosely out; she rolls over
on her side, even her back, a perfect
picture of ease.
The pleasure the little insect
evinces being thus combed and
sponged is really enjoyable to the
observer.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1902-11-08

Boiled sweet or white potatoes suit
Woozy's peculiar taste at any time
and she also likes the latter fried or
creamed. But she is wasteful in eat
ing raw green corn from the cob.
She will strip one cob completely,
scattering great deal of the corn
over the ground, and will take sly
nips out of three or four other ears
meanwhile.
Woozy is a greatgrGndmother and
her progeny never has shown any de.
sire for a vegetable diet. One of her
children showed, morbid desire for
ice and ice cream and was fond of
CLAIMS and oysters, and all but Woozy
have shown the usual cats craze for
crabs, Holsters and fish. Woozy will
let the fish go and tackle q plate Of
cold corn chowder in preference. She
eats beef or mutton, but daintily, and
she will leave colo meat for cold
boiled onions at any time. s (. ~
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1902-11-08

The one girl in all the worM for him.
ing very sensitive nature, the inher-
ent instincts of lady and a healthy
appetite-not counting face OF con-
siderable promise from the standpoint
of beauty, a figure and a. disposition of
rare sweetness.
1t was fortunate, indeed, <and very
charitable, on the part <of Aunt Mar
tha that Milly,s mothers sister, having
gone nearly blind and being the relict
of old Grigsby, who had departed this
life prematurely, but not before he had
wisely invested in life insurance to the
amount of few thousand dollars, felt
the need and necessity of "a companion
to steer her about, and selected Milly
for that important post, thus <combin-
ing charity with business. 10 be sure
the post proved exceedingly trying, not
only from the standpoint of physical
work-as may be imagined when the
querulous nature of Mrs. Grigsby is
remembered but also because of the
exceeding patience and tact required
of the young girl in order to get along
at all with the relative who more and
more as the months rolled by strength
ened her hallucination that she was
doing an act of exceeding charity in
feeding and clothing her niece in pay
ment for work which she could not
have had dcne for ten times what
Eilly's keep cpst her.
Things being at this pass one day
when Mill.~ had reached the age of 18
and had stif1ed al the aspirations that
came to her and settled down to life
time of benumbing service, the latter
decided to go across the city to make
call and accompanied by her niece
boarded cable car.
This was at 4:30 o'clock in the after
noon on the fourth day of October in
the year 1898. ~
Smoking his Havana somewhat sui
Theodore Van Aldine's attention was
attracted by an sold woman, accom-
panied by a young girl, who boarded
the ear. The woman was querulous
and complaining, the girl patient and
apparently cheerful. The woman was
nearly blind, and the girl took every
pains to see that she was made com
Portable. for which she received only
complaints. The girl did not show
resentment, but looked out upon the
sunshine and smiled at radiant nature.
And such smile as it was! It rivaled
the sunshine itself. Van Aldine OBJ
served y her curiously. Here was d
girl tied to q cross and selfish old
woman and she seemed to - extract
ing from the fresh air and the sun
shine more enjoyment than ne. Van
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1902-11-08

''Soiderancicodartiaga." This puzzled
not only Mr.. Stratemeyer, but several
learned antiguarians who dropped into
his place to inspect the relic md
none of whom could translate the in.
scription. 1t remained for some Mexi
can officers who are connected with
the commission now supervising the
construction of two gun boats for the
republic at Lewis Nixon's shipyard to
tell what it meant.
They said that the inscription was
"Soy de, Rancisco Dartiaga," mean
ing II am of Tor was made by) Fran.
cisco Dartiaga."
They all agreed the bell was of for.
eign make and was over 400 years
old. How much more they would not
venture to guess.
It is more than probable that the
relic was brought into this country on
one of Cartaret's ships. The Eliza.
beth river, then a wide and navigable
stream for nearly mile beyond where
the bell was found, flowed alongside
the Cartaret estate, while paradise
Farm" the ancient homestead of the
Hetfield family, adjoins the spot
where it was discovered.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1902-11-08
! ONE HuMoR OF POLITICS.
Malice Of a Billposter Spoiled Cam
didate's Chances Of Election.

One of the best political workers in
England is Sir William H. Holland>
one of the new knights, who, although
a busy Manchester manufacturers
cotton king, in fact-tinds time to-
look after the interests of big min
ing constituency like Rotterdam in,
the West Riding. Sir William is q.
wel1-groomed man with a f1orid face
that is seldom guilty of smile. In
spite of this somewhat doleful aspect,
which seems to be made to match a
lugubrious tone of voice, he invariably
has in hand fund of anecdotes calcu-
lated to put audiences in the best of
humor One of his stories is worth
repeating.
A personal friend of his, fighting a
parliamentary contest in the south Of
England, had the disadvantage of
being a. "carpet-bagger, whereas the
conservative candidate enjoyed con-
siderable local prestige. Toward the
close of the contest the liberal agent;
warned him that the matter was one
replied: Every well, then you can tell
the voters that if they return me I
will come and live here.' But he had
not reckoned up all the circumstances
The agent printed bills setting forth
that IF Mr.. - is elected he will
live here.' The bills got into the
hands of an opposition bill-poster and
the result was that they we're found
placarded on every pig sty and barn
in the division. That candidate, need
less to say, was not elected.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1902-11-08
She Does Not Fiirt,

The one girl in the world who does
not understand the art of flirting is she
of the Philippine Islands. She is wom-
anly and interesting, extremely grace
full, as straight as an arrow and always
picturesque, but seldom pretty; A girl
becomes a young lady at IL or 10; by
IS she is probably grandmother, but
even at the advanced age of 80 she is
stiQ supple and graceful and pictur.
esque. Tie type of beauty OF all. the
Pacific islands is the same. The skin
is yellow or brown, the hair straight
and shiny black, the eyes soft and lus-
trous, and the teeth white. The girls
are modest to, the last degree. T.. II
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1902-11-08
Hunters humorous Story

Hunters Humorous Story ts:H ..&z
~ 4 "A friend Of mine, 8 writes an army
oficer, when returning to camp after
q day shooting suddenly came in
sight OF a big she-bear with two cubs
following IN single file, proceeding
along q ridge, the forms Of the three
being sharply silhouetted against the
sky. "a t was Q very long shot, but
he determined to try it, 50 he drew
q bead on the old bear and fred. The
result Was curious. The procession
stopped. the she-bea scratched her.
self hastily, then turned round and,
regarding the cub immediate behind
with grave approval, boxsd its ears
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1902-11-08
Aldins, ani1ionaire and son az wealth
and luxury, could begin to understand.
What was it she had that he had not?

Aldine, Hnf11Ona1re and son 08 wealth |
and auxury, could begin to understand. |
What WAS it she had that he had not?
The question" made him smile and
served TO keep his eyes On the girls
face. The more he looked the more
she interested him. The play of color
and the panorama Of changing expires.
sions not only fascinated him, but
gave him some suggestion of the alive
intelligence behind THE mobile fea-
lures.
OF a sudden the thought came to
him: my God, where among the
daughters of wealth and fashion in our
set and who are so assidously making
themselves agreeable, is there one so
dainty and so intelligent? And where
is one who has the philosophy to carry
"a load such as this girl is carrying, and
do it with a cheerful face?"
The more he ruminated the more
interested he became. While he was
gazing at her with grave and intent
eyes she turned her eyes shyly that
way and their eyes met squarely. She
dropped hers and slight flush suf-
| fused her pale cheeks. Hardly less
soon than she dropped her eyes his
sought the floor of the car and cloud
| of embarrassment covered him.
Of course it was ridiculous. and he
realized it quicker than anybody. He
lit fresh cigar and looked steadily
out of the window. But he could not
forget and in the space of two min.
utes he had made up his mind that
the pretty little blue-eyed girl carry.
ing her load so bravely was the one
girl in all the world for him. The
idea stimulated him and gave him a
grip on interest in life and affairs he
had never had since he could remem
ber.
Well, that's about all there is tc
the story. He was too wise and ex
perienced, of course, to frighten he,
by; any bold moves. But he took very
good care-and expensive-to learr
her name, address and limitations. He
contrived to meet her and become
familiar with all the humiliations o1
her position.
Then he became indignant and went
| alter IU6 WdILSI III MANU- Win all Tie
force and directness that character
lied his paternal grandfather in the
upbuilding of his fortune. The resul,
was that within a month Van Aldine
and Milly Conan were quietly married
much to the disgust of Vans tmme
diate family, but more to the dismay
of old Mrs. Grigsby, who never hat
contemplated the possibility of losing
her "slavey.' So
And the strange part of it is thai
it is the happiest marriage on record
Milly not only made a good wife-s
model wife from the standpoint of do
mestic economy-but she made tht
kind of wife of whom her HUSBAND
!: is proud nearly to the point of wor
ship. And, strangest of all known
phenomena, from the fourth day o
October in the year 1898, at abou
4:30 p. NJ, or shortly thereafter, Val
Aldine acquired an interest in life o
;: which he never had had conception
= before and which he never lost there
:; "after-at least up to the present time
; and the Van Aldines have now bee1
;; married for nearly eight years.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1902-11-08
The child of wealth.

The child OF wealth. :
from the dilettante life he so despised
and get a little fresh air and motion.
This was at 4:30 o'clock in the after
noon on the fourth day of October. in
the year 1893. -. .>+,@ *,i5.'
T.. =. .
Milly Conan had been born to pow
erty and service. There was good
blood back of her-no question about
1t. But it was the blood Of the patriot;
and the martyr and not that OF the
successful trader and smoney-maker.
And her father. who had been always
= gentleman at the expense Of carry,
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1902-11-08

soundly and then went trundling on
along the ridge. evidently under the
impression that her frolicsome OF.
spring had been up to some unusu.
ally biectionable tricks. ~ .s3s mt q Il (
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1902-11-08

The happiness of God is not meas
ured by the misery of man.
Omaha daily bee., 1902-12-29
WILL TRY TO AVOID BLOCKADE
United states, Now that Powers Notes
Have Been transmitted, viii
Work TO Reopen Ports.

WASHINGTON, Dec. 2S.-The Venezuelan
government is now IN possession Of the
complete notes Of Great Britain and Ger
many concerning the various reservations
made by those governments before the de-
cision was reached that issues between
Venezuela and the European governments
having claims against it should be referred
to The Hague tribunal for arbitration.
The United States having acted as an
intermediary In the steps leading up to the
acceptance Of arbitration now turns over
to the Venezuelan government the formal
work of completing the basis for a full
hearing before The Hague. The notes were
transmitted to the Venezuelan government
through United States Minister Bowen at
Caracas.
There we're no new features to the situa-
tion here today. Oflcials are hopeful that
the governments interested will work har-
moniously and conscientlously to reach an
early and final solution Of the trouble. The
administration Is anxious that there soon
may be an amelioration of the blockade.
1t is certain this government will use
every effort to have the blockade called
of pending consideration Of the questions
at issue by The Hague tribunal for the
double reason that it's continuance is always
a menace to peace and order and because
OF the harmful effect on shipping to Venez-
uelan ports.
Just what the allied governments have
determined on in that regard II is dificult
to say, as Secretary Hay has uniformly
refused to make public their reservations
and demands as a preliminary to arbitra-
tion, that such information should come
from the governments themselves.
Omaha daily bee., 1902-12-29
MAsaUERADING AS MEN.
So sRys n woman who Posed as a


why, l know ten women light here in
Buffalo who wear mems clothing and who
held mems positions said Harry Cor
man at the Sisters hospital, relates the
Buffalo Times. Harry" German is the
woman who for twenty years has masque-
raded as a man and whose sex was revealed
when she was placed on an operating table
at the Emergency hospital recently after
slipping on an icy sidewalk and fracturing
her leg.
-Four Of these women are employed by
the New York Central railroad said
Harry" Two Of them are engaged In
the most laborious kind OF work-they are
baggage men who load big trunks into cars.
They are as muscular as the ordinary men
and hard work has no terrors for them. l
know these women we'll.
did we have an organization? No, hardly
an organization, but we ran across each
other once in a while and, over our beer
and cigars in saloons, we have had many
a good laugh at the expense OF the men.
You know, men consider themselves smart.
Well, sometimes a woman can fool them.
/ fooled them and other women are fooling
them right here in Buffalo every day.
II passed for a man more than twenty
years. When / ge. out of the hospital ]
intend to be a man again. l couldn't be
hired to wear women's clothes. I'd die
first.
IL hear that they're going to arrest me 90
soon as l get out Of the hospital. Well,
let them. But Just as soon as l get my
liberty I'll be a MAJ again. l couldn't be
like a woman IL l tried"
Rev. Thomas B. Berry, rector of the
Church OF the Good Shepherd, in Jewett
avenue, called at the hospital to see
Harry German this morning, but she re-
fused to receive him. The clergyman
wanted to persuade her II possible to don
woman's clothing on leaving the hospital
Tell the clergyman for me- said
Harry" that there is not a woman IN
the world who some some time or other
has not wished hat she was a man. Ask
him II he ever heard Of a man who wished
he had been born a woman"
1t was learned today that Harry" was
for several years a regular customer at a
Seneca street saloon and that she had
dropped in almost every evening after work
and drank three or four glasses Of beer.
She generally smoked two or three cigars in
an evening.
The day 1 didn't smoke a half dozen
cigars and drink two or three beers or
highballs l was out of sorts" said she. II
could have gone to work as a bartender on
three or four occasions. but l could get
more money as a cook"
District Attorney Thomas Penney says he
Is in no hurry to express an opinion as to
what can be done with the woman. There
is little doubt that Harry" German will
be brought into court to answer to charges
OF illegal voting.