davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26
Mr.. pooleg on PRINCE neDrg's Visit.


tn Potsdam Game Chicken, Within tn Unterderlinden
life delicatessen dealer undher hall He's
had fights. He niver wiFhave amy fights He'll go
his with tn reputation b neither winnin nor
losin battle but v tan down more foreits thin
impror puglist iv time
What do make v him? Well, sir, I think he's
not fighter, but fight lover. Did We iver see wan
iv thin young that always has front seat at
scrap tn ring that whin TIL second blows TIL
wather he gets what's left shirt front? Well
that's frind Willum. He is pathron iv spOort an
a spoort. His idee war; he's practical
He has ticket tn matches but he
nfver viii put tn gloves. He's tn spoortn goods
ceipts. If he nations belowin each other
TIL iv their distinguished consideration he
says: Boys, get together lis good match. Ye're
both afraid. Go in uncle; go in Boer' He is all
around tn ringside, encouragin both sides Stand up
again him there Paul; rasse him TIL hGre Good FIR
uncle A thrihe low that but alls fair in
Defnd yeer ndipindance noble iv Teutonic blood
Exercise ye'er sovereign rights English frinds If
tn other begins weaken tn first bottle through
tn ropes is Wlums. If annywan suggests dhraw, he
demands his money back. Nawthin' but fight to
finish will do him. If ayeher iv tn contestants alive
in TIL ring at tn end he congrathulates him an asks him
if he heerd that German cheer in tn las round.
'Oh, he's good. He'll do all right, that German
called a happy hollyer. But he that if a mans
always sappin We tn back, We begin to think he's
weak he first shakes his fist undher ye'er nose an
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26

Copyright, 1909, by
Robert Howard Russell.

~ rs gon' to be great times FIR us Germans whm
81 Prince TTnnery comes over" said Mr.. Dooley.
E '.By the way said Mr. Hennessy with an air of
polite curiosity what relations he to tn lmpror ~
Germany? Is he tn tn nevvew?'
Hes nayther," said Mr.. Dooey. "Fh impror
has no heerd iv. If he had son he'd
be a steam injine. No. sir this is TIL imprors
brother Hinnery or Hans. don't exactly know what
In usual iooties iv an mprors brother know what
an mpror has to do. His wurruks cut out FIR him.
eud fill tn job mesilf to satisfaction an tn
pn'y inpror has to PLACE is hmsilf TIL Ger
man mpror frequently mintions another, but ony III
tn way iv politeness. 1 what imprors Jootles
Is but ] what impror's brother has to DO
ex oficio as Hogan says But this boy Hnnery or
Hans wurruk thin BARTENDER in prohlbltion
town. He's a kind iv a thravein agent fr tn big
la-ad. His bag ready packed ivry night he sleeps
like fireman with his pants in his boots beside his
bed theyse thrap dure alongside tn cradle FIR him
10 slide down to tn fure. He's more thin got
10 sleep whin tn three ivens sounds on tn gong. In
6nnery leaps to tn pantaloons, down tn laddher he
goes pulfn up his suspinders with wan hand an put
i'm on with tn other an off he is FIR COrea or
Chiny Boooochisan gallOp. His brother stands
dure holIers farewell to him. Go, Hnnery!
he says. 60 dear brother, to tn land Nv per-
petchooal sunshine knock in nails FIR to hang UP tn
herman armor,' he says Knock in tn nails an We
happen to hit We ersilf thumb, ony be tn
Eerm-n Mike an raymimber We it FIR me-, he
q remain conthrol tn rest iv tn wur-
fuld iv that German Providence that
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26
By Billy Mac.



four blocks Liz talked a natural red color into
her face explaining that Walt the only real gent
in the kingdom, and the smoke dscoverer offered six
jobs the block.
If you don't see what you want, ask for it, de-
clared her majesty. by the way your name?
You have been so nice that 1 overlooked that"
Walt explained the name his father wore.
why you brother Hump Gilbert arn't
you?"
Walt admitted the charge
We'll" the queen GAS explorer think
your relative is slightly the bad, and I like his
brother better. Why don't you break in this
play? still hold the exclusive right for large part
the eastern coast, all you win to do is
wait here in Lunnon and send your agents out Why
don't you take the chance?'
Right Walt gave the mothers councils and the
societies the protection small boys weak
minded their first chance to knock, for,
reaching in his pocket he pulled out white slip
of paper and again beted himself in the stomach for
profound bend
Does you majesty object to smoking?" inquired the
fend
Whats the joker" asked Queen Liz. Il don't OBJ
yet, and L rather like the odor of burning pine"
'Then, may smoker" asked Walt.
you may if you dry enough to burn"
laughed Liz.
Walt however, overlooked the airy persidage and,
pouring little pile Pocohontas plugcut onto the
per- he rolled the dose and, borrowing a lantern
from passing small boy began to smoke
Yes he said after the first inhale your offer
now looks good viii al the castle tomorrow, and
with your permission will arrange the details"
Then Queen Liz having reached the home Of her
aunt, up steps and Walt, with bright
future before him, pursued the cigarette down the
street
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26

die finally manached to point QUIT init der who
handed me der caplegram und ad der same time
bill sigs toars skefenty 'Py Chingoes''
I ST wonder should L take him. yes?' bud on see
ing Laubenhemer still ofercame NIT der excitement
worked him for two tens for fife und told der poy
along und buy himselluf suit of clothes nit
der change.
Den der ehob uf opening der cablegram BY
dot time shocking in men boots lige var CORE
spondenter who suddenly diskers dot he is in der mid
die armies nit schooling Howefer, NIT
site Laubenheimer der second SITE
prepared for der worst und brafey obened id yust
ge vos habit uf gedding efery minute Here
id
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26
81


thin slaps ye tn back. Sometimes at
the same time An he's got tn thrue joller's iv
provin to that he's frind alone an tn deadly
inimy iv all others. He's the of Rooshya hyp-
Noticed tn king iv England Rugged standstll, an
tn mpror iv Chiny in tears. An he's made thin all
think tn first thing annywan knows, he'll haul off an
swing tn others
80, havin' fixed vrythng up in Europe, he his
eyes this counthry an says he: L think I'll
dazzle thin furriners somewhat. They've a
headed FIR prsidint that born with
feet an had cartridge bet FIR rattle,
day his gooash won't with him an he'll call tn
bluff I've been maxim these NANNY years What'H I
to make thin frinds that twud be like settin
fire to their house to attack me? hvens, I've
got it. They're a dimmycratic people. sind thin
a prince They can't keep him an whin he lands
TIL German popylationn out get up schootzen-
fists FIR him fellow mpror acrost tn say'n see
how NANNY v thin there he'll think twict
fure he makes faces at FIR Wanst a German
always German, be it liver far. he says TIL sind
thin Hinnery Hnnery! Turn in tn alarm Hinnery,' he
says Hinnery slides down tn pole tn impror says
Brother catch tn night boat FIR America pay a
visit to WHATEVER king they have there. along
annywan we like an nanny TRUNKS We need,
stay long We Place. DON'T ring Back tn -dhray
again TIL front dure hurl yeersilf into tn
We see Act just if We me-, he says. But
I'm invited, says Hinnery Write yeer
vitation, says Wilum Here's tn Fellow
Potyntate: Yeers " tn second askn'
Hnnery spnd year with We, not received.
reply will that nawthn' cud give me gr-reater
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26

bach that burned into the very Soul of Social Asp
He reserved his Conversation for the few choice
Spirits Parvenu whose appear in Small
Caps every time Mr.. Vogner comes to Town When
approached by who had broken into the Dun
Bradstreet Set, he up-stage Gesture with
the Right and murfnured 'Twentythree, which in vUl
gar Parlance Dig
This very exclusive Monarch of the Mighty Mazuma
had Private Office to enter which Caller had to
through four Ante Rooms and tell the Story Of his
to a couple St Secretaries. protective
Arrangement this Character the Main Squeeze
from Annoyances, the Poor who came TO Touch
him usually Starved to Death while waiting to get in
Those patient individuals who took a Day off and
persevered a they the awful Presence
His Nobs were permitted kneeI Smyrna Rug
their Business briefly possible. after
which they were given cold Douche and a Funny Fall
through the Trap Door
This plutocratfc Potentate belonged Club where
dared speak for fear of arousing d Charter
Member from his Daily Nap. He went to Dinner Par
ties which they Ice into the Claret in order
keep it at Temperature the Room. The
Church which he Stakeholder a Dazmaraz
They had full Chorus Ballet and introduced Nov
ing Pictures during the Ofertory. The Parson
Bostonian something that could tell whether
he Preaching trying to sing Ballad He
very well liked for he depicted Paradise being paved
per Bonds Dove Righteousness
close Third with the Terrapn and Canvas-Back
Duck
1t will be gathered from the Foregoing Mr..
Rocks had every Inducement be Happy Man.
he Quite Reverse English. He had
Secret that gnawng large irregular Holes in his
Department the Interior.
When anyone began to talk about Family Histories
he changed the Subject
AS a matter cold, icy Truth this Blue-Fish Aris-
tocrat had his BoyhoOd in the CornedBeef and
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26
BUpWElsER IMP pR1NZ HEINRICH.

will hat call der Herr Burgo Meister
schmitt und ged invitationing behalf uf der
city der Prinz Heinrich shall mage call
viii half consultation NIT der president und
Cherman Minister Pententary to der Unided SHADES
find oudt vot plans dey hat made for der Pr1nz
course you understand Kaiser would neffer haf
caplegrammed meet Heinrich ad Hoboken unless
he vos he might ged oudt der Bowery by
lonesomely und get pinched MAYBE lose hees
would be all kinds uf trouble Dare
going be many dings to leog after Back At
miraI Evans also going be hand init a few bad
die shfbs to Heinrich der way into Me York via
der Etson River und all der Bands prac-
ticing Der Wacht Rhein' und Der Sprinkled
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26
4s Ag A

Banner" togedder. Dare viii undoubtingly
der pretzel market und water VIII cheaper beer.
ISIS der answerings vich I sended back to der
Kaiser:
st. Paul der Mississippi %.
Berlin,
Rhnevine:
Your capegram receifed Id viii be such q gladness
for me to meet der Prinz at Hoboken, und mage ar.
money is money to burn here bestes hees
rangipgs We hot der minude he offers to buy.
-BudweSer.
Later alder der Prinz has been here und vented
away I will tell you aboudt few Of der dngs We dit,
und some Of der dings We didn't dit ven somepody
LOGGING. -Budweiser.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26
4 4
CHAPTER XIII.
Sir Waiter Raleigh Meets
Queen Elizabeth.

yzzzA participating rubber-leg stunt over the
major portion of section Of hundred
kzg years, pursuers of historical data come up
q the boy who is being blamed by
SO Mothers clubs and the societies of the
Daughters of the War of the Roses for the dis
proportonate consumption of real tobacco, rope and
grass weed.
Back along about the time Queen Elizabeth
covering feeling furnished at the corona
rites, Walt Raleigh, the winning all this blame,
buted public records during his sprint
through the allotted number of years, Walt dropped
his name, but when the readers first
locate him he be assigned the name his father
wore
Mister Raleigh was, without dispute, the leading
beliringer in the hurry herd of his day. With nice
velvet cloak for his whole bank, he pushed into
play cashed in the piece of velvet for the favor
Elizabeth and, before the finish landed him,
secured a quit claim deed about all of the land
above the future Panama canal not under water
Little drops water according first grade teach
ers, the mighty ocean, and little drops of
helped in pulling down the good things for
the original pipe artist the little rain drops Walt
handed thanks for his successful getaway.
On the day that Walt landed safe a drive worth
the entire circle of the bases original dis
coverer started the steps of the down town club
where he rubbering muddy Lunnon
It to Walt to get to nearby beanery, for
feeding time had arrived; but he had learned
swim and hated to takeschances.
The early date recorders of doings are trine to-
ward the mist when it explaining just what
Queen Liz doing out in the shower was
in the wet, and Walt Raleigh caught glimpse
of the leading lady the land giving imitation
human gondola the other side of the street
Walt shy the money rolls at that time but he
was real gentleman and his umbrella had still been
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26
Budweiser,

Berlin on Rhein, p.
BlIdweiser,
Laubinheimer,-
ST. Paul:
Prinz Heinrich will leaf here in a few days. Meet
him at Hoboken Sing Sing, und see dot he don't
overloog any bets. Hoch Kaiser Wilhelm.
Id excided moment Louie vos shocking all
Offer, bud he suddenly to- set: "Vot ISIS der
matter, you shocking for der drinks. yes?"
Laubenhemer win dey come by st. Paul, aind't
id?"
IVY certngy," 1 set don't you see dot en- to do
guide bitzness, und vent meet him viii tell him
dot We hat a dings toashow him in st. Paul. und
dot dare town der riffer vot has cubble uf
Touring mills und l he better run ub nit me-
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26
&s as &

Last Skitterday efening me
und Louie vos SLIDING down ad
Laubenheimer's ven in rushed
Won uf dose breatAeless messen-
cher poys nit a bisookIe in Won
liant und a caplegram in der Sec
ond hand und set NIT Lauben-
heimer, ''Iss Mr.. Budweiser
here? I hat a -caplegram for
him?" Immediately 1 vos trem-
bling NIT violence, und Louie for
vonce in his life forgotted him
selluf und gate der waiter an
nheimer vos all excitement, bud
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26

guage of time and eternity over these
many thousands of miles.
Something strangely solemn is in one
thoughts as he stands beside the observ-
er amid the silent seconds while the
clock ticks on. Whoever is listening at
the wire along its course, waiting to set
his watch, whether he be q railroad
employe or some man in a large jewel
er's establishment where the people 60
to get their timepieces regulated, knows
the system, and knows that there Is
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26

he rattles away on telegraph instru
ment at his desk spelling out the wo-d
"time, time, time;;'' then he waits an IN
slant Then he turns to his telegraph
key again. Eleven thousands of miles
of wire are open to him; he is ruler
of them ALL Every telegraph instrument
Goodsell observatory is the center is 81
lent: every operator has taken his hand
from the key; throughout the whole
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26

length of these Thousands of miles there
is q strange silence.
Above the head of the observer there
is a great observatory clock At pre-
ciseIy two minutes to g. after the tele
raphers all along the miles of wire have
been notified to withdraw their hands
from the keys the wires are switched
into connection with the very clock it
SELF and all along the eleven thousands
of miles there is no sound but the tick
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26

sudden pause just before the exact
stroke of 8 o'clock-a broken beat in ne
ticking. Then all carefully note their
timepieces as the clock in the observatory
ticks the O'Clock second. Thus they
can tell to the second whether their
watches are fast of slow or precisely
right.
Attached to the clock is a simple de-
vice-a wheel with teeth in it--located De
hind the second hand, which breaks the
current at each even second. Thus the
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26

tick, tick, of the observatory clock. Ilv-
cry beat of the great arteries of COM
merce is stopped; every throb OF the news
of all lands going out night by night
over these wires from the great heart
of the world ceases; even the sad mes
sages of death and suffering, as well as
the gay ones that tell of little babies
born and young folks married and re-
unions of friends promised-all these
must wait while the great clock on the
wall makes itself understood In the Ian
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26

overlooked in the collection Of goods that could be cashed
at the Ghetto shops Walt while rubbering located her
majesty and then hurried the street. 1t
another playing ignorance for winning. Walt
had never been introduced at the castle and the
dame doing the human gondola turn looked only
working girl Mr.. Raleigh.
Pardon me- miss" began Walt, he pulled
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26
orr How the Money!
Baron Was Upset
By George AIDE.

standing in the presence Of his Superior What was
the use Of trying to throw Frs in front
had helped him to whitewash the Woodshed? some
thing told him that Aonzo would not stand for
English Accent. So he mumbled his Thanks and fell
back in State of Collapse.
It supposed to be Attack of Emotion for no
one dared to suspect that humble Assistant Head
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26
pAGEs TORN FROM history.

"There'n be royal hurding while the Raleighs
in England, declared Walt, and then the tailor
lost a brand velvet cloak for Walt grabbed
slapped the bundle of moistened dlu
Pray walk now, your majesty he begged,
pushing against his stomach and bending
low
Miss Elizabeth tTipped gently the velvet paving
and Walt turning up collar, changed step and
pulled up alongside again the walk The
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26

Cabbage Belt, up where the Baed Hay from. He
had Individual Butter Dish until he
past nineteen When a Child he had picked Potato
Bugs brought the Kindling and turned the Wrnger
for his Mother. His Crest should have been Family
Cow rampant Patch Turnips.
It is little Wonder that the Poor Man shuddered to
think that Youth tainted by Association
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26

How We Set Our Watches by STAR
is told by w S. HARDWOOD in st. Nicholas
for January.
1t is three minutes to o'clock at night.
The official in charge of the great OBJ
servatory the Goodsell observator
Northfield, Mimi, is preparing to send
out the time to the people living in mis-
section of America. For sixty seconds
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26
Copyright 1902, by
Robert Howard Russell.

IA IGHT in the Heart of the whooping Metropolis
b IS tthere lived Proud Man. He too good for
Eg ratty old United States and the only reason
q he Stuck was that he needed of the
g RhnO-Dino-say another Million. He lived in
large stone Mausolem. People tiptoed and talk
ed Whispers they passed through the cold Shadow
pf his stately Shack. When he down the front
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26
Hot Springs, Ark.

Low rate excursion tickets to this "a
nous resort on sale daily at MinneapoH
&. St. Louis R. r. offices. Leave St. Pa
D. m, arrive Hot Springs a. IN.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26

Steps get into $4,000 Bubble had the orgi
nal man-ktling Chauffeur from Fronce manipulating the
Juice then all the little Birds would fall of the
Trees and the Children would begin climb Fences.
By years of Practice this naughty Haymaker Of
the Financial World had learned look the Middle
Glasses them all. He had CLASSY Wells
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26

clock is ticking the time over the who'll
stretch of wire covering the thousand
of miles of territory in the field of thi
particular observatory.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26

alongside; "but may I have the honor Of sharing this
rain-breaker with you?"
Queen Liz lady noble blood, but Walt
long looks and her majesty stopped the cali down
that just about to be handed out to the young
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26

with his Parents. He afraid someone would find it
out
He asked Time to turn backward in his Flight
and make him Boy again dead willing to
Forget. he could not Blue Pencil the Pages of
Memory Such is the Irony Fate. He who absolute
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26

play a real and it cinch '"To-tne- Tower
any dotty castle hanger-on reckless enough
to hanu knock toward the Raleigh escutcheon.
The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-01-26
TELEGRArHING THE 4IME.

nrter for two Laubenheimer vos all excitement,
The Savannah morning news., 1902-09-10
KNEW EACH OTHER A WEEK.
Now Nettie Green of Fitzgerald Is
Sorry She EIOped With Willie Il.
Heath

Now Nettie Green of FitzgeraId Is
Sorry She EIOped With Willie II.
Heath.
Macon, Sept. 9.-On Sunday night
Willie Thomas Heath of Macon, %
years old, eloped from Fitzgerald with
Nettie Green. 16 years old, daughter
of j. L. Green of that place. and came
to Macon, where they were arrested
to-day at Geographic request of the
girls father, and were carried back
tonight to Fitzgerald by an officer.
Heath is married man, which fact
the girl did not know until after his
arrest. She eloped with him on his
promise that he would marry her.
Heath was married last January in
Valdosta, and his wife lived with him
only nine days, when she left him
for some cause.
To-day Heath proposed to the Green
girl that they marry under assumed
names, but she would not consent to
this. She is very sorrowful over her
escapade and since the arrest. has
spent the time in tears. Willie and
Nettie had known each other only a
week before the elopement. They first
met by chance on a train while she
was going with her fathers family
from GAINESVILLE to Fitzgerald.