The semi-weekly messenger. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1897-1908, 1902-12-30

chine shop, und l hat to walk half q
mile back to find q saloon. Why don't
he leaf me at der saloon when we goes
by2 If l vhas president. do you pellet
/ allow soOch things? / vhas mad yet.
und maybe | do some damage"
/ don't say nottings back. und in two
minutes Stuyver goes on:
1.-TWO months ago a Teller named
Berger N to me und says he likes
me to sign a petition dot nOpody shall
tie up elephants to shade trees. Dot
vhas a good idea. 1t keeps der trees
from being pulled down. | sign my
name on a paper. und two days ago l
haf to GO to Il bank und pay forty dol
lar. How vhas dot for some swindles
on an innocent man? Don't sit dere
Ike some bumps on a log. but speak
oop und tell me how 1t vhas."
"If you can't write, den you can't
sign your name und lose money" I
says
"Und If I vhas q jackass. / yhas
your brudder! Four days ago l vhas
going along der street. ind | see a sign
of Danger in front OF n building. /
look oOp. und | look down. und when l
walks around der corner a mile AWAY
n street car hits me und knocks me ten
feet. Der motOrman says / vhas drunk.
der conductor calls me a fool, und all
der passengers laugh at me Do you
pellet dot vhas right!'
but don't you see dot sign of Dan
gerY"
ayes. but Why don't he say, Danger
AN Oafer Town und not fool me so?
BY golly. but if dot happens some more
/ shall break loose und hurt somepody.
What you pellet happened to me last
night?"
"You goes to sleep"
"No, 1 don't. vhas In bed. und I like
20 60 to sleep when Il Teller comes along
und knocks on my door und says some
pody Will steal my bike if don't take
her In. / hat no bike. but l look on my
front doorstep, und dere vhas a wheel
OF course / take it in und gif dot man
a dollar for his honesty, but in one
hour q policeman comes und arrests
me for stealing dot wheel from Il sa'
loon, und l vhas locked up for three
hours. Hans, vhas dot right? Was II
fashionablT Was it der way 70 serve
= man who don't kick when he has two
mudder-in-laws in der house NIT him
BIZ funder. but If You say IT vhas
pellet I shall throw your shop out
doorsi"
81 like to go fishing dis fall" 1 say!
ash l works AWAY.
"Vhell. go on und be hanged to you
says Stuyver as he kicks on der foo
init madness. Il say dis world VIA!
not right und If she don't change
Will leaf her. \ few days go ! as
my friend SchIaitEeld il he knows ~
some quiet place where | can sit dow
init my glass Of beer und pipe und no
haf snue politics around TO make NJ
tired. He says he knows der quietes
place In town ind we shall go Oop dere
We, take q street car und ride thret
miles. gad where you suppose he brin:
me tor Ii he don't Eun AWAY. l knocI
his head on on der spot"
"Vhas 1t to some hoSpitals:" I says.
"No. 1t yhas to a graveyard | tel
you. Hans. sOoch things yhas not right
If you play tricks like dot on Il man h
loses his confidence in humanity IN
becomes a pirate. Did ] tell you VIA
happened 20 me one day last week."
81 don't think So"
"VhelI. | like to rent q house, ind S
I take a leetle WALK. By und by
meet a man ind he says he knows c
shust der place for me-a snug littl
house NIT all eonweniences und chea
rent. took him in und brought hiI
some beer und den | look oop DE-
house. When | reach Ger number l I'm
a man dere und says;
'yhas dis place TO rentg"
Not exactly" he replies. but I lodt
you free
.vhen shall I GOMEZ"
sVhenever you yhas dead by ace