Connecticut western news., 1902-04-10

1 IurSotIen k. Jonn asked unanimous | consent to address the house, and Will | lis tried to help him get it, but some one objected, whereupon John. with tears in his voice and looking dolefuI as hired mourner at a funeral, said with lugubrious accent, Well, would | at least like to have permission to | print some remarks in The Record and insert laughter and applause in appro- | priate places" That was his aStonish- | Ing exordium. The palpable hit at one l of the most common abuses of the | privilege to print tickled the house greatly, and he secured the unanimous consent which he desired. He closed of gall, which added to his fame more than the speech itself. He wound up by saying, "Now, MT. Speaker, having fully answered all the arguments of my opponents, will retire to the cloak
 room a few moments to receive the congratulations of admiring friends" which set the house and galleries wild with delight. He did retire to the cloakroom, did receive the congratula- tions of admiring friends, a. perform ance which has been going on at ire Quent intervals ever since.
 John Jokes With Governor Dingiey. In many respects the late Governor Nelson Dingley of Maine was most admirable character. He was learn ed and able man, dying in the great po- sition of chairman of the committee on nd 7v,r I.Nt,.o on@o from his just fame to say that he was
 almost totally destitute of a sense of humor. He was so matter of fact that
 1t approximated cruelty to joke with
 him, but nevertheless Allen did it.
 When business was at its worst during
 the panic which began in 1893, one
 morning John and the governor met on
 street car. Governor" remarked
 John, solemn as billygoat, II hear a
 vast deal of talk about trouble in mak- ing paying investments, but I find no difficulty whatever in the matter. In
 fact, less than ten minutes since 1
 made an investment which paid me 20
 per cent. I consider that a rattling
 good speculation" 50 do l." replied
 Governor Dingley, pricking up his ears.
 How did you manage itY' "Oh," said
 John, with a straight face, "I bought
 six street car tickets for a quarter.
 which convulsed everybody within
 hearing except the chairman of the
 ways and means committee, who look
 ed as though he thought the Mississip-
 plan was trifiing with momentous not
 to say sacred things. When the tale
 reached the capitol, men wondered at
 Johns temerity.
 John Astonishes General GrosvenoR,
 As Is we'll known, on the Sth day of
 March, 1898, the house of representa-
 tives, Democrats, Republicans, Popu-
 lists and Free Silverites, without a
 man missing, performed the most stu
 pendous act of confidence recorded in
 the entire annals of the human race by
 voting to place $50,OOO,O00 without re-
 strictions and without strings in the
 hands of the president to be paid out
 on his order. AS Democrat am hap
 py to state that in my judgment Will
 liam Mckinley never violated the conf
 dence thus bestowed. AS an American,
 proud of my country, delight to think
 that no man ever has been or ever will
 be president capable of betraying such
 colossal trust.
 The vote declaring war against Spain
 was also practically unanimous. So
 were the votes on appropriations to
 carry it on, but such unanimity was too
 beautiful to last. So when the bond bill
 came up we separated and took differ he fhn 1aIo fo
 was considerable crossfiring as to who were the more patriotic, the Democrats
 or the Republicans. General Charles Henry Grosvenor of Ohio threw out
 certain insinuations which rolled the
 Democrats generally and Allen in par ticular. John rose to the occasion,
 made a fiery speech, winding up by proposing that there and then General Grosvenor should open up a recruiting
 station to enlist a company of con- gressmen of which Grosvenor should
 be captain to serve during the Spanish war without pay. John dared the gen. eral to do it, asserting that though the Republicans had large majority in the house there would be more Demo cratic congressman who would enlist than there would be Republicans. The proposition took General GroSvenor's
 breath away and set the house and gal leries in a roar. The venerable and doughty general did not set up his standard, but John was the hero of the hour. My firm belief is that had Gros- venor accepted Johns proposition evA cry Democrat in the house would have
 volunteered, perhaps every Republican. If the Spaniards had seen 360 con- gressmen advancing on them headed by General Grosvenor, they might have surrendered at discretion to avoid be- ing talked to death. Quien sabe?
 More Than Humorist.
 While MT. Aliens fame Is entirely that. No man that ever heard in con- gress or out of 1t can use invective to better effect than the Mississippian. At | times he is absolutely merciless. The two excOriations which he gave Colonel Josiah Patterson of Tennessee one in
 the debate on the bill to repeal the pur- | chasing clause of the Sherman law, the
 other when Josiah was trying to unseat l Carmack, were terrible to listen to. Patterson was Johns bete noire and
 the Mississippian fayed him alive and | then poured aqua fortis on his quiver-
 ing body. CHAMP CLARK. 1 Not Always.