Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1902-11-20
Higg. eroaned.


him, his spouse drew close to me, and
in a strange whisper began:
Il was a-goin' ter ask ye if ye knew
anything about Eliot's Electric Bit.
ters. seein' that ye had jist come from
the city"
"Yes, ma'am," was my answer.
hoped the recording angel would for
give the preyarication on account OF
the cause in which it was told. They
are making great stir in New York
and Boston just now"
81 have heard so, an that's why
wanted to tank with ye. What air they
made OFF,
Vegetable syrups mostly" was my
unblushing reply.
Vegetables she exclaisned in
wonder ''Why, the circular says they
are made from rocks that are found
over in Australy."
! saw | had made mistake. She
was not quite as daft as she looked
well. really, / don't know but Eliot's
bitters are made of rocks; | was
y
how, they are marvellous" | rambleo
| on. "If person takes them regular
| ly. after a time the hands and eyes
will give out bright electric light
when the taker is in a dark room"
'Ya-as, I suppose it kinder burns
out the bad parts of the body anc
makes it new again?"
Precisely, ma'am, precisely"
I'm a great believer in burnin' my
self. l think the body needs purifyin'
by fire. Don't you know that the Bible
speaks of it in lots o places? Plenty
o. purifyin' will make us perfect
Leastwise, it's my belief"
''Shall | order some of the bitters
for you, Mrs. Higgs?"
Il don't care if you do. How does
it Gomez"
1.-TWO dollars per bottle or six foI
ten dollars l replied.
"All right, get 'em here as soon as
you can," and Higgs having driven
up, she left the store and went with
him homeward.
In less than two weeks we (Higgs
and y had everything in readiness
for our huge joke on the medicine
Eater" as the soon-to-be-victim was
called throughout the neighborhood
A dozen bottles of rain water
made bitter with the acids from the
soda water fountain, lump of phos-
phorus, dark room in the rear OF
the building well provided with peep
holes (for Higgs had allowed me to
ask in dozen or so observers, thinks
ing the lesson would be more impress
sive upon his wife) were the con
comitants of our experiment.
Mrs. Higgs was informed in very
polite note from myself that on
certain day "a day when Mr.. Blake,
my employer, would pc apsent) the
bitters would be in from New YORK,
and that as they were dangerous for
an ordinary person to handle
would be obliged if she would come
to the store that afternoon and al
low me to give her the first dose OF
the great Electric.
She came.
The guests Gf so they may be
termed, invited by Higgs and /, were
| in their places soon after she allght-
| ed from the farm wagon in front O.
the store Somewhat to my surprise,
| she did not show any nervousness,
while l was a little flurried
The stuff is here. is it?" she asked
as she came in.
"Yes; it came this morning. 1t is
| in this case" and I motioned toward
box beneath the counter. The
medicine is very powerful and 1t Is
unsafe to unpack it all at once.
have only taken out one bottle. You
will please step this way
| She looked at me a little quizzical'
ly, and then followed my lead, hel
husband bringing up in the rear.
We went into the darkened room
made it still more gloomy, "to
test,n as ! told her. 1.-THE power of
tie medicine" by pinning the curtains
close to the wall.
! Then | administered to her a par!
of bottle of the rain water and
acid, at the same time furtively rub
bing the phosphorus on her hands
and clothing. She was very quiet
very reserved, and nahesitatingiy die
exactly what l told her.
After awhile l gave her the re
mainder of the bottle. and ther
pulled aside curtain from a large
| full-length mirror that stood in the
corner and led .her before it.
"Behold. madam. | said. in sepul
chral tones, "the magic of electric
itv. Even now the power of the
strange force is acting upon you. See
how points of light appear upor
your person. 1t is the divine life
shining through the outer shell OF
| flesh. How wonderful is scienee!"
l thought the thing had worked
well. Here and there were faint
glimmers of light, and her clothing
was all sparkles and scintillations
Higgs thought it was good. too, ano
so did the townsmen peeping through
cracks and keyholes.
l waited anxiously to hear what
comment she would make.
Soon it came in the dryest anj
most sarcastic tones imaginable:
Young feller. you're from the city
sure enough, guess. but you needn't
think we westerners air complete
| idieots 4 little phosphorous and
rainwater don't always fool folks
and the next time You want to play
game on anybody, don't take into
partnership man like Higgs there
what talks in his sleep an gives tbs
huh thing away. Wa-al, Higgs,
guess We'll go"
An uproarous guffaw from all sides
! of the room. 1t was the auditors
/ Higgs and his wife and ! took oul
way to the front part of the store
/ She made him walk straight to the
exagon. drive over 10 the rival drug
store, where she bought $50 worth
of liver medicine, and then take her
home He didn't come to town again
t-xhile | STAYED in the Mace