The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1902-12-29
THE IDEAL QUIET DAY
OF THE NEWSPAPER f1AN

| ''Now,' said i to myself as Il freshly
cut batch of copy paper was laid on
the desk and an eager compositor
searched the "copy" drawer for Il mite
OF reprint, 'now shall seat myself in
thought profound ana compose some
thing great
| a heavy rain was falling ana the
! pedestrians who splashed by the win
| dow were soaked soggy and dis
gruntled. \ dog fight on the opposite
side of the street failed to draw a
single spectator.
AN ideal quiet day for work. No
body will thrust subscription money in
10 my Spencerian fist, and unchai-
lenged chirOsraphy shall eubelllsh the
manuscript of q masterpiece
The telephone tinkled musically.
"Hello." l said.
"Hello." came the answer il, sweet
tones Of the feminine gender.
"Hello.'' / said, once more.
"Hello.' she said; have you spare
ribs?"
Madame or Miss" said J. IT have
no spare ribs. ] need every one in
my body"
The out-tap was given mutually and
picked up the pencil and arranged
the Spencerian fist.
a friend from a. neghboring town
dropped in and splashed down into a
chair, squirting Il spray of raindrops
over the freshly cut copy" paper.
II thought l would just drop i'll and
tell you that my paper has not reached
Inc until Monday for several weeks"
l,r n,yyaEl s.y 80
at home about it, but he said it was
your fault"
"It could not be- | eXpostulated.
'.ill papers for your town travel in
the same bundle, and If one reaches
town all should reach. Do others re-
cel"e their papers no timc?"
Yes" he replied, "but the postmas-
ter said you must have II spite at
me-"
Nov, look here my friend" quoth
L. why should l have a spite at you?
What have you done thai / should
single YOU out and cabbage your pa
per at the risk of losing one dollar a
yea", which in a thousand years would
amount to more than q Thousand
amount to Il thousand dollars?"
THAT is a big pile OF money to throw
away, amt it?' he remarked, scratch
inc his head.
The telephone tmklod.
"IIello' said.
"Ilello" she said.
''Hello" said.
"EellQ!" she said; "have YOU anv
SPARE rbs?"
Madam or Miss" l replied Impress
lively, ~ have no spare ribs TO spare.
Perhaps might tear some of the boys.
This Is print shop and we butcher
nothing but English"
Ine double out-tap sounded,
II can't see, though" remarked my
friend, "how tits that my neighbors all
get their papers on Saturday and mine
don't come til. Monday"
II cannot see, either, The names are
stamped on the margins automatically.
and 1t is almost impossible to miss
ona"
We'll / don't get mine till Monday,
and l don't see why you can't give me
the Courier-Journal free for missing so
often"
MY friend, / shall make a special
effort to get your paper on time this
week. l shall write to the postmaster
and the carrier; If that does no good I
shall write to the president, the post
master general, our two senator's and
our eleven representatives. II that fails
shall take the ear each Saturday
morning and carry the paper myself"
lie Strengthened mp to go, and shook
off the remaining ralndrops to the
freshly cut copy" paper
We'll, See that you do" he said, "or
I'll stop the paper; l take more papers
now than ! can read"
The telephone tintled.
"Hello!" I said.
"IIello!' she said.
"Hello!" said.
"Tlello." she said: "haye you spare
ribs?"
Madame or Miss" ] replied desper-
ately, Il still have no spare ribs. but a
hog has just left the Office, and if you