The Savannah morning news., 1902-04-07
THE MEAT COMBINE.
Uncle MingO Has a Few Words to
Say About 1t.

"Wot's de news out to 'Pussum Hol-
ler?" asked the waiter as he was pre-
pairing Uncle Mingo's breakfast.
"Dey had sumpin' funny at de cote
house de udder day." said Uncle Min
go. ."Wile dey was tryin' case de
judge step out minute to git drink
One o de fellers cen de case git cen
little frienly argument wild de counsel
on de udder side. Nachally, fus' ting
you know dey was at it hammer an
tongs-biffl bang! jis as de fus' roun'
was ober, cen walk de judge, wipin'
his mout'. Well, 1 declared! he say,
dis is goin' leetle too fur l hereby
GIBBS notice dat l shell SEN de whole
business to Jail for term o. years,
an likewise fine you all twice as much
as you kin pay. 1 shill sholy show
dat de majesty OBJ de law mus an
shill be respec' cen dis neck o. de
woods. blieves,' he say, cen usin'
discretion. Wen it's a case of some POI
misguided gambler wot amt nebber
had advantage of no Sunday school
eddfcation,a an furdermo' is wallyble as
a regular customer he say, i blieves
cen temperin' justice wild judgment
But wen it come he say, to turnin'
dis cote eento de Newnited States
Senate, an dat too vile is out an
miss SEEM de scrap, l has to draw de
line"
The old man then turned his atten-
ton to his breakfast: he stuck his
fork into an object about the size of a
silver dollar, and holding it up to the
LIGHT crQZad a If pi1riO11c1U
"Wot you call dis?" he asked.
Oats your steak, sah,'' said the
waiter.
ooh! it's steak, eh?" said Uncle
Mingo: "Glad you tell me. 1 lowed
it was piece OBJ hash. Is dat de bes'
you kin do to-daY?"
''De VERY bes', Uncle" said the
waiter earnestly. 'I glib you de choice.
Cook say OATS de boss orders, to cut
down de steak"
"Well." said Uncle Mingo," he is sho
a 'bedient Teller. dat cook"
Don't blame me, uncle" said the
waiter; faint my fault. Talk to de
boss"
"Ar right" said Uncle Mingo; FAX
de boss to come here a minute
The boss came UP, smiling and bow
ing, and was forthwith tackled by
Uncle Mingo.
HAS dis high-tone an recherchy
establishment come down to dis?" he
asked, exhibiting the dimnutive
steak" You 'scribes dat as a suf-
ficient ration OBJ meat for a workin'
MANI"
Very sorry sah," said the boss,
"but de butchers has advance de price
so high dat we has been compel to re-
JUICE de portions; udderwise we would
sho come out at de small en- OBJ de
horn" #
;sWot did pdey done dat for?" asked
Uncle Mingo.
Dunno sah." said the obsequious
account OBJ de beef trus' cen de Yves
Don't blame us, sab; go an quoil wild
de butcher"
II WILL said Uncle Mingo; and sure
enough after breakfast, he went.
When he entered the shop he found
the butcher, red-faced and brawny-
armed, weighing a sorry roast for a
disconsolate looking woman standing at
the counter. The butcher wrapped the
piece of meat in a piece of paper and
handed it to the customer.
How .much?" she asked.
sixty cents" said the butcher.
"Geemaneddyi" thought Uncle Min
CO. IF could sell a piece O. meat like
dat out to Postum Holler for quarter,
I'd git rich an hab chicken for dinner
edible day."
With a sigh the woman counted out
the silver, took up the parcel and went
away.
Good mornin', sah," said Uncle Min
go; "wot you payin' for beef cattle to-
day. sah?"
Different prices" answered the
butcher; depends on the condition.
81 ral
Yes, sah," said Uncle Mingo. Il
hear dere has been quite rise cen
de price OBJ meat"
That's OWN to the rise out West"
said the butcher. They've got a COM
bine out there and they keep putin
the price higher and higher. Of course,
we've got to advance, too" is
"Yes, sah," said Uncle Mingo; but
amt dey liable to git de price so high
ontell po' man won't be able to eat
no meat at all?"
"a poor man amt got no right to
live, nohow," said the kind-hearted
butcher.
mo, sah," said Uncle Mingo, ''sut-
tinly not, sar, cose he amt. Kin you
inform me, sab, wy dey keeps putin
meat so high out Wes'?'
"No, 1 can't" said the butcher, short
w. "All l know is 1 have to pay the
bills, and they are blank big. If you
want to find, out all about the why's
and wherefores, you'll have to go on to
Chicago and see the combine.
Yes. sah," said Uncle Mingo; tan
kee. sab: I'll go right away, sah Good
mornin'."
When Uncle Mingo reported at the
restaurant for dinner, the waiter in
ouired if he had seen the butcher
20 yes" said Uncle Mingo. Il seen
him. / was VERY anxious to nm out
de bottom o. de matter, an l tink l
has fin out. It's a blame bad business,
an 7 don't see nothin' to do but 10
form a. beef-eater trus', an here goes
to form it right now. You needn't 10
bring me no mo- beef no mo, ontell &c
combine gifts mo- reasonahbler; an II
ehblebody else would do de same ike
me, we'd sho git de price down again
cen hurry"
$50 de butcher didn't glib you no sat
isfaction, eh?" asked the waiter, grim
ming.
Mingo. "Ebblebody put it off on some
body else. Fus' l come to you bout ae
meat. YOU say faint your fault, go 70
de boss. 1 go to de boss; boss say tam
his fault, go to de butcher. go to de
butcher; butcher say faint his fault'
90 to de combine cen Chicago. If was
To go do de combine cen Chicago dey
would say faint DER fault, go 10 dc
cattle ranch Teller out cen Texas.
IAN if you was to go to him, asked
the waiter, 'wot would he say!
EFF I was to go to de ranch feller cen
Texas answered Uncle Mlngo; l