The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1902-10-06
QUOTABLE FUN IN
THE SULTAN OF SULU'

One of the most surprising facts in re-
lation to 1.-The Sultan Of Sulu," the new
musical satire by George AIDE, the "Fa-
bles in Slang man, is that it contains
no slang. 1t is an opera built on the old
lines and depends for it's fun on the com
edy situations and the real humor of the
story, and not on any horse play, puns
or so-called gags" Throughout the book
are many ep1grams and bits Of dialogue
which are likely to be remembered and
quoted. Here are a few samples.
When the American lieutenant meets
| the beautiful Sulu maidens he says to
them: I'VE paid twenty millions of dol
lars for you. At first 1t seemed a large
price. but now that have seen you am
convinced it was a bargain"
The lieutenant observes that one of the
Filipino s1naidens is smoking a cigarette.
He expresses his surprise and she asks
him. Don't the ladies Of your country
smoker Whereupon he replies: 1.-The
ladies do-the women DON'T
The Judge advocate from Boston is in
troduced as "A lady who knows as much
as any man-and then some more.
After the city is taken the sultan is
made governor. the American colonel as
surfing him that "a governor is the noblest
work Of the campaign committee
A reception is described as Function
at which a large number of people assem-
BILE in order to be exclusive
The lieutenant says to the American
girl, Il love you as only a West Pointer
) can love the one girl in sight
Hiram learns the American waltz and
} is charged with it, but has fear that 1t
is not proper. When assured that II Is
nroper he says: II had no idea that any
thing as pleasant as that could be proper
The colonel assures Hiram that the
constitution and the cocktail follow the
, flag
Hiram says: IT am going to drink
5 cocktails all day, and waltz all night.
: am going to be SO civilized 1hat people
will talk about me-.
He tells one Of his wives: "According
y to the Ladies Home Journal it is not con-
d sidered good form for wife to hane
). around when her husband is proposing
: marriage to another lady.
: The sultan has eight wives and atte'
= the American law Is introduced ne
e arrested for "octagamy.'
n On the morning after the Inauguration
It Hiram decides that civilization may be
a all right but took too large dose r1gh
~ at the start
y When Hiram is about to propose to thu
II American girl she warns him that she Il
not an heiress. He says: Henrietta
n Won wrong me- I am Sulu, not English
y Hiram learns that Henrietta is en-
gagged but she is not sure that 1t is go1ns
"a to ''take.'
'e Under the American law a divorced wifi
is entitled to one nall OF the llco1I1e y
y the husband Hiram has eight wives
~ therefore is expected to pay four time
N ~ his income and the more he Increases nj
~ income the more he owes. AS ne ex
.: presses it: Il am broke, and the NOR
80 money I get the worse am broke
Hiram decides that He loved nc
wisely but too often.
n After Hiram and his secretary haV
~ been sent to prison and put into convic
~ suits they condole themselves with tn
I'll fact that science has lately discovere
It, that crime is merely disease They ar
H. mot really bad, but are troubled wit
~: bacilli."
Ut Hiram and his secretary open a matr
ne ronial bureau and advertise as follow:
~ '"Husbands and wives supplied While yo
n wait. Satisfaction guaranteed or gooc
1ss' will be exchanged
ny When the lieutenant receives his pre-
v, motion and is hailed as hero, kl-ra1
III svrpathizes with him and says: "You'1
~ ~ hero Now you will have to be invest
~ gated
~ The complicatio of the play 81
NC LARGELY Strengthened out when 1t
learned that the supreme court decid'
Sc, that "the constitution follows the f1s
ed on Mondays, Wednesdays and Frida!
W. OnlT.'