The Intermountain Catholic. (Salt Lake City [Utah] ;) 1899-1920, 1902-05-17
THAT REMINDS ME-.

Mother-Edward Edward! w nat dr.
Edward2We're playing housekeeping
and Willie said he'd be the carpet IL
| do the work.
The Cliff Girl-Dear me! How annoy
The Caddy-Gee! If that's al! she's g9ot
to say when she breaks stick it's hardiy
worth while t2lkin' about II.
Literaticus-Have you read about tht
recent discovery by noted explorer OIL
THE Missing Links?
Edgar Golfly-No. What club is sup
posed TO have played on them!
"Maude is very ambitious Do you
think she will ever make a name for her
! self"
mo, but she'll probably succeed in get
| ting some foolish man to give her his
Mrs. Scrappington-If somebody should
! threaten to abduct me and hold me for
a ransome, what would you do?
Mr.. scrappington-Laugh like thunder.
%
and. say, boy"
! BE sure to call me in case the hotel
! catches fire.
Sorry. sir. but it's against the rules
burlington (proudly)-I can trace my
scent from William the Conqueror,
Grimshaw (calmly)-WeI, go ahead and
do it if you feel inclined. William the
/ Conqueror won't mind.
Little Elmer (who has an inquiring
mind-Papa, where do those pessimists
that we are always reading about live
Professor Broadhead-On an island of
egotism in the midst of sea of woe.
The Fireman bursting into room)-
Come on down stairs, lady the hotels on
f:-a.
Actress QUESTION. couldn't you take
me down the fire escape or extension lad
der? The stairway's so common.
o
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. why are you so
cruel as to keep me waiting for my an
swer? 1t is now ten minutes since 1 asked
you to be my wife.
Gwendolyn-Oh, pardon me, 1 forgot.
was simply choosing my bridesmaids.
Hedley-well. you must be back num-
Der for sure.
Wedley-Why. what's the matter?
heard the mother-in-law joke.
Wedley-I didn't: 1 said 1 never heard
my mother-in-law joke.
you say your airship is a success"
Il do. answered the inventor.
But it never flies any distance worth
mentioning
"Of course not. Il is too valuable an
invention to be allowed off the earth
very long at time
she-What horrid taste that Mrs.
Mrs. Bloomly has,
He-Why. / thought she was an espec-
tally we'll dressed woman.
She-Oh, she's we'll dressed enough but
just think of her wearing a red hat, on a
yellow railroad car.
II suppose you rejoice with the rest of
us in seeing the grass coming up again
to welcome the smile of the vernal sun
chine"
"Of course I do" answered the man
with thin lips; moving the lawn at
a. m. is the principal fun 1 get in life''
o
Young Camper-You must have had
life in the woods?
Aged Guide-You bet | have A man
has to duck quick to dodge these new re-
peating rifles. And there are a good
many women shooting nowadays, be-
sides.
Teacher-mWhat is meant by medium Of
exchange?''
Willie-Wat. man?
Teacher-What is the medium of ex-
change-what do you take to the store
with YOU when your mother sends YOU for
groceries?
Willia-The book
Office Boy-Will you please raise nv |
salary?
Employer-Why. I gave you a raise !
only last week, because you told me that |
you had your mother TO support
OFFICE Boy know, but my mother got |
and now | have two to sunnort
o
Mrs Cotherstone-Smith YOU anv
l0-cent plaster casts of Romeo. Macbeth
Hamlet and Othello?
Dealer-I believe not, madam.
Mrs. Cotherstone-Smith - Oh, How