Omaha daily bee., 1902-06-11
BITS OF WASHINGTON LIFE.
Minor Scenes and incidents sketched
on the Spot.

on the Spot.
Naval Constructor Hobson Of Merrimao
and smacking fame, who is seeking a soft
berth on the retired list, strobe into the
room of the senate committee on naval af-
fairs the other day, loaded with documents
bearing on his case. The committee was
in session. but the business under considera-
ton did not prevent the members from
sizing up the formidable roll of papers
which the lieutenant carefully deposited on
a convenient table. At last the Hobson bill
was taken up.
"What is the matter with your" Chair
man Hale asked the maj who went into
Santiago harbor and got kissed by the girls
for so doing.
81 am suffering from compound hyper
metropic astigmatism, retinal hyperaemia
and trachoma," replied the naval officer.
"GraciousI" calculated Senator Gallinger.
Have you got all that the matter with you
and still live to tell 1t to the committed"
Hobson nodded.
"Then MT. Chairman" Mr. Gallinger
said, II move that the bill be reported ia
vorably. l do not know exactly what Mr..
.Hobson has got, but surely 1t is enough"
The rest Of the committee agreed with
the New Hampshire statesman and Hobson
leIt the committee room WITHOUT ONCE re-
ferring to his voluminous reports.
Senator Dietrich of Nebraska was eating
breakfast in the cafe of an uptown hotel
yesterday morning. relates the Washington
Post. Someone wanted to know the time.
Nobody at the table seemed to possess a
watch and one OF the party started to call
a waiter.
THAT isn't necessary" said Dietrich.
And then from his outside coat pocket the
senator extracted a large alarm clock. 1t
was one Of those Decent affairs, with a
gong on the top. ut is twenty minutes
after g." remarked Dietrich, glancing at the
figures on the clock.
II carry this alarm clock all the time"
he explained. ITS a great thing. If I
have an engagement at 3 O'Clock / set the
alarm for ten minutes before that hour,
and then when I hear the gong go of l am
reminded Of my engagement. Then I set
It for the next appointment, and so on all
through the day. It's a great scheme. You
ought to try It,"
"Uncle" Joe ann was chairman OF the
select committee which had IN charge the
refurnishing Of representatives hall.
Among the other things promised the mem
bers for this session was an elaborate sys-
tenn Of ventilation by which cold air could
be forced up through a series of ducts 90 as
to reduce the temperature Of the hall and
make 1t comfortable In hot weather. The
members have been waiting for the cold air,
but so far none has been felt. The tenn
perature in the house is the same as in the
senate and in the corridors Of the capitol.
Congressman Watson walked over to Mr..
Cannon one afternoon when there were
more members In the restaurant than there
were in the house. The Indianian's collar
was melted and his face was beaded with
perspiration.
Uncle Joe,' he asked, seriously, where
is that cold air we voted money for last
session."
"Yes, where is it?" echoed Mr.. Cannon
as he mechanically mopped his forehead
with his handkerchief. 81 told those darned
favor OF buying anything / could not see,
but they were bound to do it,"
"There is one feature OF the government
service that puzzles me- said a chief OF
division in the Treasury department to the
Washington Post, "and that is the lack OF
men stenographers, I don't see why men
who have ambitions to enter government
work don't equip themselves along this line.
I do not mean to dlsparage the efficiency
Of women typewriters, for they do all that
is expected OF them, and more, too. But
there Is a Limitation to their usefulness, no
matter how expert they may be. There are
certain confidential relations which a
superior must always have with his assist
ant, which cannot be shared with a woman.
oftentimes we have TO rely on the judgment
Of an inferior. and are not always willing,
and in fact would be afraid. to trust to the
discretion Of a woman.
ITO my mind the scarcity OF men type
writer's is largely due to the fact that
women have bluffed their masculine rivals,
or would-be rivals. from the field. The
latter evidently think that the craft has
been monopolised by the women. To tell
the truth, there is no field so much open
to men. as far as Uncle Sam is concerned,
as that Of the typewriter, and in few IL
there held out such prospect OF advance
ment. For instance, Secretary Cortelyou
is an ex-stenographer, and not so much oil
an 'ex' at that, for he was. and always
will be, a skillful hand at the typewriter.
But he is a cabinet possibility and he rose
from the opportunities held out By his call
ing"
The moral of this story comes FIRST. II
Is: Always be polite. especially II you
want things from congress.
When the battleship Ohio was launched
at San Francisco, relates the New Yorh
World. President Mckinley was there with
his cabinet. The ofncials OF the Union
Iron works were IN high feather at having
the president and so many other distin-
guished people for their guests.
Representative Foss, chairman Of the
house committee on naval affairs. was there
also. and Representative Dayton, the rank.
ing member Of the committee. They were
such comparatively small fry that the,
were not hidden to the feasts, and wheI
the special tug went out 70 see the launch.
ing they were not invited.