St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1902-05-03
H1ATT,s HUMOROUS DOUBLE.
How an Aspirant for, Congregational
HOnOrs Got the Congressman
in Trouble.

Gas young man | was extremely
anxious to become political power III
Iowa." SAID L. f. Cook, the Chicago in
ventor, according to the Chicago
Chronicle. "Happily l did not expect
to jump into the senatorial chair at
the first bound. but would have been
content with the humblest seat in the
house. So went to Des Moines to
electioneer for the appointment as SER
geant-at-arms.
'To my surprise, was everywhere
greeted as Mr.. Hiatt and as soon as
realized that was the double of the
popular Iowan l took Bob Flynn into
my confidence. Flynn was a CONNER
cial traveller, who always knew the
newest story and told the latest joke.
He knew everybody in the state, and
as was anxious to be talked about
conceived the brilliant scheme of hav-
ing Bob Flynn escort me to my hotel
parlor, which was the headquarters OF
all the lady candidates who were
after every position woman could fill
at the capitol.
Accordingly, Flynn took me around
and tremendously introduced me as
Mr.. Hiatt to every daughter of Eve in
the room, who straightway proceeded
to buttonhole me for place
dubbed over with the most fattering
promises.
"'Why, my dear madam [ would
say, I have heard all about your ex-
ceptional qualifications for the posi-
ton you desire, and my influence is at
your service, but, mind, this is sub
rosa!'
SWELL, they were the happiest lot of
women you ever saw, and, for won
der, each one kept her own secret.
The next day Hiatt was expected, SO
we took another fellow into the joke,
| and when Hiatt arrived he was steered
straight to the fair Candidates, who
were all so glad to see him again Nat
urally he was dumfounded at the uni
versal rejoicing among these women,
! whom he had no recollection of having
ever met, but was too polite to say SO.
FINALLY some of the bolder spirits
delicately reminded him of his prom
Use, which he indignantly refuted. In
stantly the crowd became aware of the
situation, and the tower of Babel was
an assemblage of deaf mutes compared
with that hotel parlor.
| "'Why, Mr.. Hiatt! Don't you remem-
Der when you were here yesterday that
| you promised me that position?'
".And met And mel And mel
chorused the crowd.
"'I didn't! didn't vociferated Mr..
Hiatt.
"'Now, Mr.. Hiatt! Ididn't think you
were that kind of a man. 1 never
dreamed you would go back on your
| promises was the reproachful cry.
ct tell you, I wasn't here yester-
day!' protested Mr.. Hiatt. I came in
on the morning train!'
"'Well, Mr.. Hiatt, do you know Mr..
Bob Flynn?'
"'Certainly!'
| "'Well. where in the world il Mr..
Flynn was the excited inquiry. sOh,
there he ISL as Bob OPPORTUNITY put in
an appearance.
Say, Mr.. Flynn, didn't you intro.
duce me to Mr.. Hiatt yesterday
"'Sure thing replied Flynn.
No, you didn't was the angry re-
joinder.
"'Well. if it wasn't you, he looked
nightly like you'll!
"The row was at it's height when l
walked up to Mr. Hiatt, and when that
female contingent saw us standing toy
gether, like twin brothers, even to our
clothes, silence fell upon them, but
after Bob humorously explained the
matter they had the grace to laugh at
the shabby trick. As for Hiatt, he
laughingly remarked: Next time I
meet a man who looks like me I'll kill
him at the start, so he won't give me
any more trouble"