Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1902-09-06

1lbatiiiR ttHVlfS- lIAA ttil9 w Gil : i -
my chance for 10 cents.
CONSISTENT.
On unions he is dany:
'Scab labor he will boot;
And the only underwear he'll wear
is a labeled union suit
Cleveland Commercial Tribune
Say. old man. what Is summer girl
"A summer girl is rack 10 stretch
shirt waists on; inside is a receptacle f0l
lobster salad and lee cram. while out
side is an attachment for diamond rings"
Life.
Now, sir, dou't make SUI"
row.
Diner Out Confound those infamous
rascals; why, they've actually stolen the
keyhOle, and | can't get in.-Gazetta di
Geneva.
The Lady Did anyone call while |
was out?
The Maid--No ma'am.
That's very strange. | wonder what
people think | have an 'at-homc day
for,'-Moonshine.
MY father once had a hundred men
under him."
That's nothing My father had a
hundred thousand men under him"
Nonsense"
Yes; when he went up in balloon. -
"You see, maam," began the profess
sional beggar, Il got my arm scalded. III
he glad to show you-"
Never mind" interrupted Mrs. Koald-
art. You're only wasting your time
here"
mot at all. ma'am, my motto is no
trouble to show goods. Philadelphia
Press.
They found the woman of Wyoming
weeping. on her doorstep.
Last night. she said they broke in
and tarrcd and feathered my husband. "
And is this why you weep they
asked
Sure, sure! Didn't they take the only
feather bed | had. The Cowboy.
Towne--I see there's Western scien-
tist who declares that the insect which
says Katie did, Is the male and the one
that says Katie didn't" is the female.
Henpeck- That's all nonsense, because
II you'll notice the one that says Katie
did frequently has the last word. III
bet they're both females Philadelphia
Press.
Farmer Glover newspaper in handl-
Wei, | declare, the whole country has
gone theater mad. / never expected TO
see the day when Il cabinet officer would
20 on the stage
Mrs. CloVcr-Oh, that can't he so.
but it is so. Here's the paper speak
ing about the acting secretary OF state"
~~Pittsburg acknowledgement.
why did you insist on getting me an
upper berth in the sleeping carr asked
the habitually auSterc lady.
well, answered her irrepreSsiblc
niece, You have been expecting for 50
many years 70 find somebody under your
he'd that ! thought ii might relieve your
mind 10 have all doubts on the subject
removed for once. Washington Star
Smoker have heen reading about y
chap in Washington who has imvcntcn
what he calls Il cold-air furnace Ii is
designed to cool HOUSES just like furnaces
heat them.
F'latter-Y Yes. think | know what they
arc like, The janitor ran one in ou:'
building last winter when ii was below
zero, Cincinnati Commercial Tribune.
Miss Mobile Wen, Martha. how is
your husband now?
Martha-Po'ly, miss, poly. He's got
that explanatory rheumatism.
Miss Mobile-9You mean inllammatory
rheumatism. "Exeamatory" is to cry
out.
Martha-(with solemn corviction)-
That's IT, mum; that's it, lie don't do
nothin hut holler.
Another Golf Phrase Summer Hotel
Proprietor ton pia2Zal-Talk about crust.
There's Wally Darlington posing us a
golr expert. again.
New Arriyal~Il'm! Doesn't he play
the game at all?
Summer Hotel Proprietor Play ?
Great Niblichs. I'll bet quart of wine
against a hHnd-me-down cocktail that he
never cursed a fooxle in his life, Brook
lyu Life.
Yes boa>tcd an Enghshman in the
West, II have Tudor blood in my veins
from my mothers side of the family.
and lhntagenet blood from my Ia.
thCr's "
Is that sos" said a citizen. NV
blood is little mixed too. AIy grand
father was dorsey tendcrfoot. an my
grandmother Digger Indian ~uuaW
We're both hafbrced>, stranger
Shake"