Abilene weekly reflector. [volume] (Abilene, Kan.) 1888-1935, 1902-06-12
MY MICR0BIAN DINNER

Il wonder, Thaddeus," said my wife.
doubtfully, giving me searchlight
look, III you could get your own din
ner tonight. | want to go to a meet
ing Of the Suffrage Club and the maid
Is going out.
| Now, 1t has always seemed to me
that the more a man asserts his indie
pendence the better. felt pretty
doubtful about that dinner, but I
wasn't going to let Maria know I had
any qualms. remembered, too, l had
managed we'll at bachelor housekeep-
ing for few weeks. had everything
convenient; never made the beds, be-
cause 1t was so we'll to let them air
thoroughly; and because believed In
consolidation and that in unison there
is strength | die, not wash my dishes,
but let them collect and the day before
my mother returned put them in a
tub and turned the hose on them.
The success of this venture embold-
ened me to try again, but for reasons
best known to my own soul | did not
tell Maria. | simply said could man
age, and would really enjoy the novel
performance Of getting my own din
ner and that 1t would by no means
prove fatal. resolved two things
frmly-that should have good din
ner irrespective of the germ theory,
microbes and bacilli, and that the din
ner should be at six o'clock promptly.
This not having meals on time, felt,
was all nonsense, and while Maria was
away was surely the time to indulge
in microbes, for she feared them SO
she had given me restricted diet
That day left the Office at four
o'clock. had been thinking at inter-
walls during the day what should
have for dinner even meditated
corned beef cabbage, mince pie and
doughnuts. All Of them would make
myself after left the Office.
I procured on the way home the
necessary supplies An alluring dis
play met my eyes. went into the
market and purchased a nice plate
piece Of corned beef. was about to
tell the butcher would carry 1t with
me for my six o'clock dinner, when
the butcher, who knew me pretty well,
assured me that corned beef had to
boil number of hours to be done. In
the reaction that followed this an
nouncement remembered; that he
could send it for the next day. had
meant that all along and | hastily
purchased some oysters and lamb
chops. Il will have oyster soup for
the first course" said to myself,
land chops and tomatoes for the Sec
ond If that won't be good | don't
know what will"
1t was five o'clock when got home.
1t was so lonely without Maria that
thought | had better start the dinner
at once besides | wanted that meal
at precisely six sharp. Maria had
about bothered the life out of me by
not having meals on time. l lighted
the burners on the gas stove, and
decided to make biscuit, mince pie
and doughnuts, besides cooking the
oysters and the meat. BY half-past
five | was just enjoying the thing.
had the milk for the oysters content
eddy boiling on one Of the burners and
the others had been blazing for some
time, all ready for use when wanted.
The first thing | did was to find a
cook book.
| ran down the index through pump
kin, lemon, carrot, custard until got
to mince pie, This | read carefully.
Then | sadly closed the book. Mince
pie required cold meat, apples and a
thousand other things, and could not
be made in an impromptu manner;
and at six | must have that dinner.
| felt distressed, but there were still
the doughnuts. | was Just in the
midst Of discovering 1t would take at
least a good two hours to make dough-
nuts, when, by thunder! didn't that
milk boil over! | felt like going
through the whole lltany. rushed
to the stove seized my clean handker-
chief. and had just made up my mind
that the milk must be done enough
for the oysters when l discovered the
handkerchief was done also.
This crisis being past, decided 10
make my biscuit thought this time
would not consult the cook book, for
it was getting along toward six, and
It took too long to hunt up recipes.
| put a great deal Of -four In a small
bowl, dumped in some water. and pro-
ceeded to mould it all into shape as
had seen Maria often do. In the in
term | talked to myself.
'T know all about this" said with
pride, you just stir until 1t gets the
consistency Of cream, put in pinch Of
salt and favor to taste. That's what
they always say, ] have read 1t hun
dreds Of times. | can't fail. shall
Just slap them into a tin pan and put
them in the oven" felt | was sue
ceeding SO well that actually began
to hum, when suddenly it occurred to
me to wonder If one creased the tins.
when in doubt, don't grease | said
to myself, and quickly decorated the
pans with dabs Of dough.
Five minutes later ! had sicken-
Ing feeling, for Maria had never told
me about the oven. felt sure, how
ever. that, being . man, would un-