The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1902-10-14

in other words a commercial traveller
He was man who always looked upon
the bright side of things; wherever he
went, whomsoever he met, he was ever
jovial, chatty and good tempered. AS
chairman or "Mr. Vice" at that impor-
tant midday function, the dinner in the
commercial room, where he was always
q persona grata, he was in his element
He did good business for his firm, too
and made a liberal income as things go
nowadays. Unfortunately, to this list
of his good qualities must be added one
great weakness, and that was drink?
No. Joking! Yes, and even worse
punning! 1t was this propensity that
one day got him into trouble, and led
to his being carried to the accident
ward of hospital; as will presently
appear.
Mr.. Curtis travelled in the hardware
line-so he himself, perhaps little
ironically, phrased it. He was, in fact,
a traveller for a firm of engineers who
manufactured locomotives, and this he
was wont, when asked what Zine" he
travelled in, to explain in his own char
acteristic fashion.
would begin, well I travel in locomo-
tives, sir-yes in locomotives. And
yet 1 amt no engine driver, nor stoker
either. Ha, ha. ha! That's odd, amt
IT., sir? And here's another curious
thing. Most people can travel only in
a railway carriage when they go by
rail, but II, when I go a journey. l
travel in the carriages and in locomo-
tives at the same time. Ha, ha, ha!
Sounds what they pepperbox-I mean
q paradox-don't it? OF course don't
carry my samples with me. Fatt, l
assure you. Amt got any stored about
me in my pockets anywhere. You may
search me, If you doubt it. Amt got
any in my baggage either. You can
look through my bag, and see, if you
like Never travelled with a sample but
once, and then the sample Travelled with
me; man wanted an engine in a hurry,
and said he must see sample before he
gave the order. Rushed down to my
firm, and got 'em to send one along the
line I went on it myself, SO as to be on
the spot when it arrived. 1t made me
awful seasick, butt sold it, and book
ed an order for two more!"
One day Mr.. Curtis, in the ordinary
course of his business called at the Of
flee of the Loso. Superintendent loco
motive engineers) of one of our lead
ing railways; but found him out, and
not expected for an hour or two. Mr..
Curtis, with his usual dogged patience,
decided to wait for his return, and to
occupy the interval with smoke while
while he watched the trains go by. The
great mans Office was beside the rail-
way, about two or three miles from the
London terminus, at the junction of
various converging lines that ran
henceforth side by side to the main
station. Here the whole line was very
wide, being what is known technically
as a yard" Lines crossed each other
in the most bewildering fashion; trains
kept dashing past, sometimes on one
side, sometimes on the other and In and
out, amongst them all single engines
crept about bent on shunting trucks
and carriages, or may be, simply shift
ing from one line to another. Crossing
a yard" on foot is at all times risky,
even to those accustomed to it. The
metal crossings are so intricate that 1T
is next to impossible to tell which line
approaching trains or engines are really
making for, and they often steal up and
threaen to run you down in the most
unexpected and surprising manner.
But Mr.. Curtis knew the place well:
he understood the points and crossings,
and watched not approaching trains,
but the signals, which is the only safe
way-if you understand them. He
made for the green slope of an en-
bankment which f1anked the line on
the opposite side, and seemed con-
venient and inviting spot on which to
sun oneself and watch all that went
on around. He crossed over In safety,
and was soon seated halfway up the
bank enjoying his pipe. There was
drowsiness in the air, and Mr.. Curtis
was On the point of dropping off into
doze, when a man came down the
bank from above and seated himself
beside him, with a bluff Fine day,
sir"
Mr. Curtis regarded the newcomer
laziiy. He was an old man, with long,
white hair, and lose-cut, snow white
beard His face was wrinkled. but his
eyes were bright-almost too bright
some might have thought, for there
was sort of wildness in their glitter
But the man seemed quiet and peace
full enough AS to raiment he was
dressed in corduroy of the kind affect
ed by railway porters, and which, by
its peculiar odor, so unpleasantly at
fects most other people. He had with
him a carpet bag-long in shape. like
those used by cricketers-and this he
opened, taking from 1t book and
some biscuits. These last settled down
to eat, at the same time studying the
book, and occasionally glancing at Mr.
Curtis Presently he remarked again,
"Fine day, SIR
Mr. Curtis took his pipe from his
mouth. WELL" he said slowly, but
with the usual twinkle in his eye, you
can call it fine if you like. didn't
contradict you. Yet, If / were to say,
of course it u.s. you might think was
denyin' tor else maxim pun. And
he chuckled hugely to himself.
The stranger sfivered.
"I hates puns-and-jokes-of all
Sorts" he said. Specially practical
jokes
"oh, mine are never too practical,
Mr.. curtis returned, with a sort of
wink. Sometimes people do say
they're rather far fetched, may be. but
; Id 81