Evening star., 1902-03-15
ECHOES OF THE FLAT

NO said Mrs. Stretcherino to her guest
| as she returned from hasty visit to the
| nat dumb waiter, IT can't just naturally
abide folks that are always laying stress
upon little bits of things. but, mercy on US!
how that young Dopinch couple in the fiat
above manage to get along and keep their
! health on an exclusive diet Of pork chops
| Is more than I can understand, deed 1t Is!
! l do honestly believe that they have pork
| chops every day in the week for breakfast
| and dinner. too. and wouldn't be bit sur
| prised if she gave the poor thing a cold
pork chop to take along with him to his
office for his lunch. should think they'd
be just afraid of turning into pork chops.
so I should Every morning, just as regu-
| iarly as clockwork. the smell of pork chops
comes floating down the dumb waiter shaft
| from their fat and regularly every day l
see the mess of pork chops for their dinner
| going up on the waiter. I guess the poor
] little snip Of a thing is too-er-well. born
| tired we'll say. to be charitable, to cook
anything for her husband that takes little
she's lazy-I wouldn't even dream Of such
thing. deed. I wouldn't! But she certainly
does get herself up in slouchy way when
she goes out, and. 90 you know, l really
think she blackens her shoes with stove
polish! I wouldn't have you breathe it for
worlds that mentioned it! And she pre-
tends to come from such swell family out
west! She was down here yesterday after
noon and / do declare she talked about
her family. and the great things she was
used to before her marriage. for solid
hour. until thought should go distracted.
deed did! I pretended to believe 1t all. of
course-one living in a fiat has to be civil,
you know-but I hope she doesn't think L m
so simple as to have swallowed such non
sense, when as a matter OF fact. it's my
private opinion that her father was brick
lacer 10 qhp ia 1kS about his hiQ
building operationsi
"S-sh-ssh! Do you hear that clnking of
glasses coming from the fiat on the other
side OF the court? Well that's what I'm
compelled to listen to morning. noon and
night. and how that Mrs. Muchswg man
ages to consume so much beer as she does
and be in any sort OF condition to receive
her husband when he comes home Is be-
yond me. deed 1t Isl Goodness gracious
sakes alive, the beer boxes are going up to
her fiat In regular stream all the time.
and it's no wonder that she has so much
trouble with her husband.
II hear 'em quarreling dreadfully every
night. He drinks like fish himself. they say,
and yet he objects to her following suit. and
| the way they do talk to each other. mercy
on us! And then she has these Dutch
iuncheons. as they call EN- every few days.
and invites a lot of her women friends
bcld-looking creatures. I should call EN-
and the high jinks they do have all the
afternoon! But It's none of my business,
| and II she doesn't choose to invite me to
her paltry little luncheons. what do care?
I'm sure that I'm not bothered-and yet
| was Just as good to her when she first
| moved into her fiat as could be- and we
used to make Welsh rarebits together Of
| afternoons. and all that. but she got angry
just because she heard me call down the
dumb-waiter shaft, What, another case of
beer" one day when the beer man was de-
livering a case to her. OF course she and
her. husband go out together all the time,
and they pretend that there is never
cross word between them, but l know bet
ter-Tve heard them.
It's wonder we're not having some mu-
sic, If that Topnote girl in the fiat right
alongside this one calls it music It's re-
lief. sure enough. not to hear the poor
thing, who thinks she has contralto
voice. and who is having it cultivated by a
| teacher who ought to be ashamed to take
the money, a-sduawking even for few
minutes. She's at 1t all the time, and If
| she didn't begin the other morning a little
after 3 o'clock, l hope l may never! If
she'd only sing something. even try to
sing something, that had some sort of tune
to 1t. it wouldn't be maddening. but she
howls nothing but exercises all the time,
| and it gets on ones nerves SO, you can't
imagine! You mustn't even breathe that l
| complained about her screechng. though.
for the poor deluded thing runs in here
often. and as don't want to hurt her feel
ings l have to pretend that 1 just love to
| hear her practice. and always ask her to
sing something for me when she comes in.
just to make her think that she's getting
on. you know-but it's awful experience,
deed 1t is! My husband pretends to be-
lieve that she has fine voice and that she
is liable to make a name for herself but
he doesn't know one note from another.
and of course he doesn't know what he's
talking about. The very idea of his telling
me that she has voice like a cello and
all such humbug! The very idea,
"Was the door opened in the fiat below
by black-eyed creature who thinks she's
pretty when you came up? Because she
generally opens her door towel. there's
w fnr h,,S
she hears a bell ring in any part Of the
fiat. OF all the inquisitive women she is
certainly the very worst I think she
would Just expire In her tracks If she
couldn't find out everything about every
body's business in the building and 1t
makes me so indignant when l come up
stairs to see her poke her head out that
way. deed 1t does. We don't speak any
more. because she heard me say down the
dumb waiter one morning that 1t was
mighty queer my milk didn't get stolen
only along toward the time when the gov
ernment people have their pay day j her
husbands a clerk. you know, and he's the
only clerk down beneath here, and l sup
pose she took it to herself, but 1 don't mind
a bit. / didn't like to have her running in
here. anyhow. Haunting her fine clothes,
and deed where she gets them Is a mys-
terry to me- and her husband only an 81 1900
clerk. She gets herself up regardless and
then comes racing in here, with the idea Of
making me jealous but il wanted to put
every cent that my husband could rake
and scrape on my back I guess I could
look we'll as she does-sh-sh! there's the
hall bell-why, Miss Topnote, how do you
do. 1 heard you singing your new exercise
this morning, and. 1t was beautiful, and I
could hardly do my work for listening.
Won't you sing 1t for me in here and give
us real treat?"