The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1902-04-25

ouANCu 1AAC AAltCAS anu uAu ~ HI ulOSl
offensive way.
When Wade was approached on the
subject with view to ascer,aining
whether he recognized the code it was
discovered that he would fight, that his
choice would be rifles, and more, that
with this weapon he was a dead shot.
This information prevented the sending
OF hostile message. For few days
afterward the two senators exchanged
no word or look of recognition, and
Toombs seemed sullen and uneasy: but
finally, leaning toward Wade, whose seat
was near, lie said:
II don't know that there is any use
for us to make d. fools of ourselves
Nor t." Wade retorted, looking him
squarely in the eye, "but some folks
'The other day." writes Eli Perkins,
Il met French gentleman at Saratoga,
who thought he had mastered the Eng
fish language.
How do you do?' said on accosting
him.
"'Do vat?' he asked, in puzzled man.
ner.
- mean, how do you find yourself :?
'Saire, l never lose myself!
You don't understand me; mean,
how do you feel?
~'How I feels? Oh, I feels smooth
you shust feel me. success.
Father-Stop right there, daughter, l
know that young scamp from top to toe.
SGuandercd every cent of his grandfath-
er's hard-earned fortune-hasn't he?
Lucille-I believe he has.
Father-Gambles?
Lucille-Yes, sometimes.
Fathcr-Plays the races?
Lucille-It's true.
Father-Owes every tailor, shoemaker
and halter in the city?
Lucille-Well, yes.
Father-And could not make a dollar
to save his life?
hucille-I don't believe he could.
Father-Wouldn't accept steady po-
sition if found it for him?
Lucille-No, suppose not. ,..
CARS?
Lucille-Yes.
Father-And the best dinners?
Lucille-Yes.
Father-And the theaters and operas?
Father You see I know him, don't
you?
Lueille-You do. And as you know
him so we'll, l was about to ask YOU if
riage? =:
Father-Well, I'm blessed if I don't
Intercollegiate News.
It was in country village that the
swain had proposed for the hand OF
the village beauty, and had been sue
cessful and carried off the PALM: He had
bought the engagement ring and was
hurrying as fast as his two feet would
carry him to the home of his adored one.
A friend tried to stop him to make in.
quiry concerning his haste.
HELLO there, Bob! Is there fre?"
Yes" replied Bob, with what breath
he had left, my hearts on fire and I'm
going now to ring the village belle.''-
YOnkers Statesman.
Sergt. Harry of the Washington police
was an usher at the white house during
'One night he said, yesterday, when
there was an eclipse of the moon, l
was standing near the President and
Mrs. Cleveland, who were looking at the
eclipse and admiring it.
~ don't believe Olney knows about
it, said Mr.. Cleveland, and he will be
sorry to miss it. Harry, go telephone
Olney to look at the MOON
Il went to the phone, and Olnev's
chef. or butler, or something French, an
swered.
"rho President sends word to Mr..
Secretary to look at the moon,' l said.
To look at vat?' asked the French
man.
The MOON repeated.
re vatY again he asked.
The m-o-o-n,' spelled. the MOON
Is re President III hies mlnd!'
Yes: he tells Mr. Olney.. to 20 look
at the moon. Give him the President s
message
"'But vat fer is zat-to look at re
moopT
II Ven said word or two and rang
off. About an hour later the same butler
called us up and said:
'Meestaire Secretary desire to say
to Meestaire President Eat he have
looked at re moon and he is mooch
obliged"
Life insurance people are queer" OBJ
served the man with the incandescent
beard.
"Are they?'' asked the man who is in
leading up to the next line
'Yes. First they convince you that
you may die within week, in order to
get you to apply for policy, and then
they must convince themselves that you
will live hundred years before they will
issue it."-Baltimore American.
A Philadelphia who has just returned
from an extensive tour through the East
tells a good story in which he was one of
the principals. He was one of a party at
Patiala, at which nearly 100 guests, rep
resenting nearly every branch of Indian
life, were present. AS special guest, he
was seated OH the left of the Indian DO
tentate. During the meal he noticed that
the latter partook of some fine Cumber-
land ham, and knowing that it was con
:trary to the Indian caste rules to eat any
portion Of q pig, he without thought
asked his highness how it was he was
eating ham. The Maharaiah lookod ~