The Birmingham age-herald., 1902-10-12
IA POST BELLUM AFFAIR, OR HOW
 SOME STOLEN DRESSES WE'RE RETAKEN

Of the party heard a signal opposite the island It proved to be an oid woman who lived two miles off, and who had in hand a case knife. The party gathered about her. and MeKelvey gave it as his opinion that she had come arler some or the bacon. and was signaling to the is- land, not knowing that we were after the precious deserters First the old men, then I, tried argument persuasion, en- treaty, threats. everything nut rorce. to make the old woman divuIge the where aoouts of the other missing property but without avail. She had come to the river to get some medical roots for ner rnuma- tism, and protested that she had no knowledge of the stolen things. calling on her Maker to witness the truth of her assertions. She fairly outdid me in de- eeit, when I passed off to her son as Thompson.
 Finally, when patience was exhausted McKelvey said to me: You are too d--d chickenhearted about women Turn over the command to me, and I'll make the old hag tell the truth"
 very gladly resigned in his favor, and he took rope. brought to tie prisoners, or hang them as may be, and commenced to make a hangman's noose at which he seemed to be skillful. Everybody was silent but the old woman began to eye hls movements with evident curiosity. After the knot was made 1t did not seem to slip according to his ideas and he sliced off a piece of the bacon and greased the rope, at the same time slipping It up and down on his elbow. The old woman finai- ly broke silence with: MT. Kelvey what are you going to do with that anyhowg' Pointing to a huge willow which bent over the deep currents of the Chattahoo- chee, he replied: T am going 10 hang you to that tree till you are dead and then cut the rope and let the fishes eat your carcass"
 Again, she loudly protested her inno- cence He threw the rope over a limb of the willow, jerlsed off her bonnet and clapping the moose over her head began to draw. Of course, we all knew Nickel vey would not hang the woman, nor would we have permitted it-out 1t looked very serlous-especially to her.
 After a little he loosed the rope and asked her for the truth. but sne again protested her innocence. This was re- peated twice. the last time the rope must have grown very tight for when 1t was relaxed she confessed everything. told who got the articles that they had been on the island but had been moved, she knew not where. This last was the truth.
 Finally she agreed if we would not hang her or prosecute the takers. let bygones be bygones, she would deliver everything at a neighbors house two days after, which was done. The faithful McKelvey went with me and when we returned with the recaptured spells. my cousins, who were rather slender, sat on the floor around the trunk while unpacking It. When their fine dresses came to view 1t was seen that they had been cut in the back and gore or V-shaped piece of cloth let in so that the buxom belles who bewitched the deserters might wear them; the dresses being otherwise too small. The girls had been mad up to this time and their remarks had been most exem- plary in Christian patience. But now their patience gave way and they cried and cried again over their wrecked finery.
 My friends thought my life would not be safe in that neighborhood, but I re- mained there the rest of the year, and on one occasion met my deserter friends at cider pressing and saw them occa- sionally. but can not say we were very cordial
 After awhile came provisional govern ment and proclamation of amnesty for most sins, including the taking of the goods and the pretense of the hanging and peace rested in that neighborhood.
 It is gratifying to know that the de- serters and those who shared their spells long since became good citizens and have a respectable standing in the community as well as in the church. Most of the actors have gone lover the river,' those gallant, warm-hearted friends who stood by me even when in a disagreeable task, but Lawson McKelvey still lives, cheery warm-hearted fellow, as of old. Maybe the rough edge on his tongue Is somewhat smoothed, but however that is- wherever he may be-here's a health to him. and these remembrances now serve only to call up merriment. We are prone to forgive the faults of thirty-seven years ago.
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