Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1902-12-18

come in and look at the sunhowers.
He looked at me minute as If ne
meant to have my life, and the man
with the horse said he killed his moth
er.in.law II years ago, but it ended
in Benjamin going down into his boots.
It's a wise man who knows his mother
in-law.
Thursday-When Mr.. Bowssr came
home thi, evening he was in good ma
ture, and after dinner he suggested a
trolley ride by moonlight. Amanda
was ready to put on her hat at once,
but took him out into the back yard
and said:
Benjamin, you took moonlight
ride not long ago. You first got mad
because Amanda complained ofa head
ache. Then you roared at passen-
ger who happened to step on your toe'.
Then you yelled at the conductor be-
cause the current happened to be shut
off for minute, and before you had
got mile you called fat man a hog
and got into fight"
"I don't allow ANYBODY to walk on
me, says Mr.. Bowser in reply.
"But are you going out with chip
on your shoulder If you are, you
can go alone. Neither myself nor
Amanda wants to carry a club or get
into a row. If you can cit still and
look at the moon and be civil to the
other passengers, we will go, but 9TH
erwise not.
We went. 1t was very hard for
him to behave, but by pointing my
finger at him now and then I kept him
in subjsction, and no one was MUIR
dered.
Friday-Mr. Bowser sat down to
breakfast and looked all around to see
what he could find fault with. He f.
nally growled out that the chop wasn't
fit fer dog to eat and was going to
say that Mrs Bowser probably ordered
the cook to drive tacks into it to spite
him, when l remarked:
"That will do for this time, BenJa-
min. I knew when you were glad
enough to get Goldfish for breakfast,
and I don't want to hear a word
against mutton chops. If you were
my husband I'd keep you on salt pork
and corned beef all summer.
"Are you never going home2" he
roarsd at me.
"I am Benjamin-going home to-
morrow night, but meanwhile don't
you get too colty. If you do, III
change my mind and stay a month
longer" j"
He reached home at 6 o'clock p. m.
without having anything to kick about,
but after dinner he told Mrs. Bowser
that he had been advised by the doc
tor to drink three quarts Of goats
milk day to get the acid out Of his
blood andthat be should probably buy
four goats during the evening. She,
poor soul, hadn't any objection to
make, but turned to him with:
Benjamin., what particular acid is
in your blood2"
"It's what causes rheumatism, he
answered.
"When have you had rheumatism?'
"I've got it now.
whereabouts ?"
"In my legs"
~ beg to differ with you, Benjamin.
A man who can slip over back fences
the way you do can't have rheumatism
in his legs. You may have buzzing
in your ears and wheels in your head
but your legs are all right. Goats
milk may be good for you, as you are
good deal of kid, but there will be
no goats around here"
"Do I run this house or do you ?
he shouted at me.
~ do, Benjamin, and don't you
make a mistake about it. I've run it
for two weeks, and I've got one day
more left on the third. If you want
to buy hippopotamus or a boa con-
strictor, go ahead, but don't let me
find any goats in tn. back yard in the
morning"
Saturday-As l was to start for
home today, Mr.. Bowser made it hol-
iday and a day of rejoicing. At
breakfast had to warn him that If
be wanted better coffee he might go
to a hotel and at 10 o'clock I interfered
to prevent him from buying an oyster
farm and raising his own oysters, but
we got him through the rest of the
day without trouble. He took me to
the depot in cab and said he was
sorry I couldn't stay longer, and l