Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1902-06-20

On His Hands: | noticed you hoeing
your garden yesterday, What are YOU
raising?" "Bllsters. mostly Phils.
delphia Press.
Mrs. Hoyle My husband says that |
Am one woman In thousand Mrs
Doyle-Aren't You Jealous of the 99e?
New York Sun.
Cause for Worry. Aunt Sadel fear
| heard him say that he dropped so,v''o
ON The street yesterday. Brooklyn
Life.
Ef Gabrul WIZ ter blow his trumpet
er-morrer, some er de fault finders
would rise en- tell i'm dat his musical
eddication had been neglected. -Atlau-
ia Constitution.
upgardson--Among the fraternity OF
professional musicians l consider
Atom Fraternity OF professional m,i-
siclans. Don't talk nonsense, old man.
Chicago Tribune.
Borem--N Now, what would you do ir
you were In my shoes, Miss Cuttings
Miss Cutting-l'd point the toes to-
ward the front door and give them u
stsrt.-Chlcago News.
He-Miss wadsworth is rather man
nish. isn't she? She-Exeeedingly.
Why, she'd rather pay cents more for
an article than go into department.
store to buy lt.-Puck.
whats u wreck. pop?" "A wreck.
my son, is a disaster ON the water"
Not always. pop. there's old Rednose:
he's wreck, but water had nothing
to do with ."--Yonkers Statesman.
Mr.. Kawdle-I wish you wouldn't in
terrupt me- every time | try TO say
something. Do l ever break In when
you are talking? Mrs. Kawdle-No.
you wretch! You go to sleep. Tit
Bits.
Have the letters been duly exam
lned by the handwriting expert?' Yes.
your honor" VERY we'll; let the
handwriting expert now be examined
BY the insanity expert. t."-Ohio State
Journal
Boarder (warmly)--Oh, know every
one OF the tricks Of your trade. DO
you think | have lived In boarding
houses twenty years for nothlngs
Landlady (frigidly)-l shouldn't be at
all surprised
yisitor-What are you crying about.
my little man? Little Willie-All my
brothers have holidays. and have
none Visitor-Why. that's too bad.
How il it? Willie between sobs)-I
don't go to school yet.
A conductor said in tone of great
severity to a passenger who was max
ing considerable disturbance on a ear:
Remember. sir, that you are on a pub
lie vehicle, and you must behave as
such.-Lipplncott's Magazine.
"Yes. | am opposed to American girls
mafryin furriners." said old Mrs.
Spes. Pm just that opposed to IL
that II my girls can't marry people or
their own sex they needn't marry at
all, and that's all there Is about it,"
Flanagan Hiyins, man. phawt's the
matther wild yer face? flanagan
Faith. twas an accident The ould
woman throwed a plate at me. Flana-
gan-An' dye call that an accident?
Hanagan-Av coorse' Didn't she hit
phwat she aimed at?
Hojack-My wife only writes to me
once a week while she Is away. Tom
dik-Mine writes regularly three times
week. Hojack-She must be very
fond Of you. Tomdik-She Is; and
then only send her money enough to
. last two days at time.
A Question of Privilege: Mistress
after q heated discussion with argu-
mentative cook)-Are you the mistress
of this house. | should like to know !?
Cook-No, ma'am. aln't.-but #
Mistress triumphantly)-Th don't
talk like an idiot!-Punch.
did you git anythlngY whispered
the burglar on guard as his pal emerg
ed from the window. Nav, de blok e
wot lives here Is a lawyer replied the
other in disgust Oats hard luck -
replied the first; did you lose any
; Ping ?"-Ohio State Journal.
, Sharpe-On his birthday before their
marriage she gave him a book enii-
lied "A Perfect Gentleman" Wheaton
Any change after year of married
life? Sharpe-Yes; on his last birth
day she gave him book entitled
wild Animals Have Met."-Tit Bits
Intimate Friend-The assessor hasn't
listed your property at one-tenth or
what it is worth: Then why don't
you increase your assessment volun-
t tarily? Mllllonalre-l did that last
l year. and everybody said was max
[ Ing a grand stand play for popularity.
= Chicago Tribune.
Il Lieutenant Ito his orderly Bring me
! beefsteak and poached egg. Orderly
Excuse ME, lieutenant. but haven I
you forgotten that you are TO dine To-
h night at Countess Stingely's: Lleuteii-
; ant-That so. had forgotten IL.