davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02

bowling and yelling, asking questions
and giving opinions to one another.
Manifestly this was the safest place
for the moment, till we heard a cry of
JOY from the inside, and knew that the
leaders must have overcome our
friendly cupboard.
Come" said to Acton, and led him
across the green to Clinton's house,
easily distinguishable for it's many
lights and the music coming from it.
AZ he door we We're challenged by a
sentry and asked what was our busi-
ness.
Especial message to the commander
in chief. / must see him at once" said
I, looking at Acton In fear that the alb
solute establishment sitting on his face
would end the matter then and there.
You cannot see him now, man. He
is"
Tits a dangerous thing to waste
time, my friend, when Sir Henry Clin-
ton is concerned. Call his secretary
here at once" and stood aside on the
steps to allow some late arrivals to
enter, as If the matter Were settled.
"Bnt you'll get us hanged, man."
Whispered Acton, iii you"
Hold thy tongue, mani" 1 said in
the same tone.
but I don't SEQ
"Well. corporal. are you not gone
YETI" l asked, angrily. do you know
that Your head will drop off, if this de-
lay gets about?"
Il have my doubts,' he answered.;
but I'll call Mr.. Cameron"
Cameron then, was the secretary,
and he came in n moment, dressed in
black and rubbing his thin hands to-
getller.
Mr.. Cameron" I said before he could
speak, Il ann Mr. Merton, and this is
Mr.. Roberts. We have just come from
Newport and Nerplancss with dis
patches for Sir Henry. Will you notify
him at once?" And | showed him the
DISPATCHES.
He looked at us q moment through
his marrow little eyes, and finally said:
Come this way, gentlemen, if YOU
please" and going around the side OF
the house we entered by smaller door
into u cross corridor. AS we passed
along, Isaw brilliant series of rooms,
polished floors, and groups of uni
formed men and beautifully dressed
women walking UP and down the hall
Then in an instant we stood in a dim
ly lighted room.
AT the end of five minutes large
door opened on the other side of the
study or office, and u bright light from
one of the ball rooms burst in upon
us. a large hand held the door for an
instant, and my body stiffened as I
heard a lively girlsh voice 1 knew in
my dreams now saying half angrily,
half plaSfully:
Put, Sir Henry, this is my dance"
My dear Mistress Debby, l am far
4 more unhappy about 1t than you can
be" said high, somewhat querulous
masculine voice.
Il DO not believe 1t! If 'twere true,
YOU would not run away So
There came some answer, which was
lost TO us in the study, for at that
moment the door opened wide, and a
| tall, thicl-set man entered, and closed
! it quickly behind him. He stood stlll
a moment not being able to distin-
guish clearly in the dark room.
Continued Next Meek.l
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02
HARvARD's RADICAL ACTION.
Big School Has Set Precedent in tn
Matter of a Three Year Course.

u
~. ~, ,r,.;,,,,n ~ 90,
~ 's ''o'i "
harvard coiuge IN putting me three
year college course ON equal footing
with the four-year course is likely to
,.,usa no little discussion among edu-
80. -, ,,,ta.ar.,e, -,
eaeoia aiio iiieh iti'ei e'teu ~ euuesl-
ton, though Harvard for NUMBER or
years, to all intents and purposes, has
given the degree of A. B. In three years
TO such rs desired 1t.
but now that the college has put It's
official stamp ON this pet idea of Presi-
dent t,liot's, the three year course, by
allowing a man to receive his degree
at the end of the third year instead of
making him come back the following
June with the fouryear men," said l..
G. Ha,ldry of Philadelphia, II look to
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02
HE Treat.

Chicago Tribune: 1t was midnight. As,,.
the bartender at the guided booze par
.or was preparing to close, in compliance
with the ordinance in such cases made
and provided.
At this moment the distinguished for
eign visitor came in, accompanied by his
suite. He had enjoyed an evening OF
comic opera, and was on the way to his
hotel, but was still full of music.
Seeing the cash register on the counter,
with the keys outward. he stepped up to
1T, sang several bars of Mr.. Doaicy-
ooley-oo!' and accompanied himself in a
lively fashion on the keys.
Say" exclaimed the bartender, with a
gasp. do You know what you are doing?'
II kess so' replied the distinguished
foreign visitor, In his best American dia-
lect. ''Vot is zee damage?"
''Twenty-seNen dollars and fifty cents, .
said the bartender. looking at the figures
registered by the machine.
"All r-r-right. Zet EN- up $3.50 WORT.
Zhentlemen, ztep up!'
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02
Their Words Stuck.

New York Times: When Mas
Twain was in Egypt he one dag
arranged with friend to meet him a..
one of the pyramids. The latter en-
gagged two old but experienced Arabs
to guide him to the place. He after
ward complained that. although he had
some knowledge of their native Ian
guage, he could not understand any
thing that his guides had said to him,
You should have hired younger
men" Mr.. Clemens told him These
toothless old fellows talk only gum
Arabic"
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02
Another Strike.

Atlanta Constitution: "Brer Nillums.
how YOU gwine ter vote dis fall?"
II amt gwine ter vote, yo' heah me?'
why not?"
. Kase dis ting oh err teligence culud
patrit exercising de universal sufYridge fer
de prices whut am offerd desc days am
senear my eondignity am reference rer de
mancipashun prockymashun! Now yo
heah me, don't yo?"
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02
Indirect Profit.

Puck: rs there amy profit in selling
postage stamps?" inquired the man la
search of information.
Not directly replied the druggist,
but it gets people into the habit of
going to the drug store, and after that
it doesn't take long to make chronic
invalids of Them
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02

Philadelphia Press: Tess Why do
you dislike him SO?
Jess-O. he says such hateful things.
He told me last evening that beauty
was only skin deep, and
Tess-And you Immediately proceed
ed to show him how thin-skinned you
We're.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02

Judge: I'VE are living in rapid
age" / say to my friend as we note the
fall announcements of changing styles.
Yes" he agrees.
We are making history rapidly" l
further remark.
True" he mutters. 'but not so fast
as we are making historical novels"
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02

IN
GER OF SIR HENRY CLINTON is
FED.
AS looked about me 10 gather "a bit
of the situation of the house. ! could
not forbear an exclamation; for, dark
as III WIS., | could see but a sorry house
for our abode. The building was a
straight affair, marrow and high, with
pointed roof like II Dutch house, and,
though at first the house appeared to
be complete, l saw in II moment that ii
had been practically destroyed by fire.
The lower rooms seemed TO be hastily
repaired. but the upper windows had
no frames or glass in them, and the
whole was blackened with singed wood
Back of the house and towards the
water l could make out in the murl.y
darkness the black ruins of the burned
dwellings, and here and there tents
built over roofless rooms, with now
and then light shining through the
Sits In the cloth.
Acton was standing grumbing to
himself as was his wont.
This is no place for u.s. said he.
we shall be caught in u hole like rats"
The longer we stand here, the more
likely" L answered, and forthwith
raped upon the door with my sword
hilt. No reply coming. we pushed in
the door, and, it giving easily to our
weight, we entered to find q long mar
row hall, and stairs running straight
up towards the next story. AT the
farther end a light showed beneath u
door, and with u step we were at 1T.
finding, on opening, am old woman con-
fronting us with wonder and suspicion
in her silent face.
Who be We, then?" asked she, after
a moment.
Listen. woman" said /, quickly,
speak not so loud. We came here from
Doh.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02
How It Worked in Frozen Doc.

Puck: Bronco sillWe had ter expcl
t..at temperance eMhorter fer tn good NV
the community.
Grizzle Pete Hows that? . thought TIL
boys wuz all signing TIL pledge?
Bronco Bill-They wuZ. An got tie.
shootin SO blame straight that we
wouldn't hev had no community left In
little while
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02
~. ,de.

Lie: 81 want you to understand,
sir. that my pride forbids me to accept
anything from you after l marry your
daughter"
How are you going to live?"
We'll, l thought you might make
some kind Of settlement beforehand"
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02
A Great savino.

Judge: Mrs. Buster" Mrs. Jasper
is making her own clothes now. They
ought to be rich soon"
Mrs. Redhead-"Oh, I don't know
Her husband is living in restaurants
In the meantirne,''
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02

Only one remedy i'll the world that
viii at once stop itchiness of the skin in
any part of the body. Doan's Ointment
At any drug store
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02
Johnny's Logical Request.

Philadelphia Ledger: johnny Mamma,
should we pray for other people?
Notwithstanding, Johnny.
Johnny-Wcll then. can't you say my
prayers for me after this?
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02

Judge: Casey just over)-oi'n. (hic1
from Cork, officer.
officer Well. il won't be tn flrsht
tonne Owe pulled a cork.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02

A boon to travellers. Dr. Fowler's Ex-
tract Of Wild Strawberry. Cures dysen-
terry, diarrhoea, seasickiness, nausea.
Pleasant to take. Acts promptly.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02

Two bottles of piso's Cure for Con-
sumption cured ne of terrible cough
Fred Hermann, 2O9 Box avenue, Buffalo,
N. Y, Sept. "a, 1901
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02
An Invaluable Aid.

Judge: Mrs. Jones-Pray, tell me,
senator, what book has most helped
you?
Senator showdown-Nly wife's first
cook book.
Mrs. Jones-Ah! And how did that
help you?
Senator showdown-Why 1 got SO
that I'd sooner work than eat, and the
habit has chung to me.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02
Safe From Their Friends.

Judge: Madge-Was there any gossip
at tho sewing circle?
Marjorie-How could there be? Ever1
one of the members was present
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02

rl.o Permanently Cured No fits nervousness after
TIL first da's OF Dt. kliie's Grea: Nerve Re-
storer senir ii Il + ea trial bottle and treatise
Dir X. IL. KLINE Ltd, 93l Arch ST.. Philadelphia Pa.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02

Monarch over pain. Burns, cuts,
sprains, stings. Instant relief. DR.
Thomas Eclectric Oil At any drug
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02

Yale Record. say, kid. don't you
ever take a BATH No, sir: l don't
have to. ! swea.s q good deal
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02
Her Mistake.

Mrs. Austin's Pancake -four makes lovely
brown cakes Ready In jiffy.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02

Mrs. Winslow's SOOTHING sTRup FOR Children
!eethlng; softens the gums, reduces Inflammation al
nays paln. cures wind collie. % cents bottle.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02

Cleveland Plain Dealer The papers
say that the new battleship Maine isn't
as fast as was expected
well, lets all hope she isn't going to
get fast in the way the first Maine did"
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02
A Familiar Proceeding.

lovely breakfast Is quickly prepared
from Mrs. Austin's Pancake -four.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02

Halls Cu.arri, Cure
Is constitutional cure. Price rs cents.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02
Close Competition.

Mrs. Austin's famous Pancake flour is in
town-fresh and delicious MS ever
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02
Professional jealousy.

Chicago News: Pennibs-Have vol
read my last poem?
Inkerton Your last, did you say?
Pcnnibs Yes.
Inkerton-Well | Lone So
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02
CHAPTER XVII.

IN WHICH THE SPECIAL MEss1.N
GER OF SIR HENRY CLINTON is
FED
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02

"open in the name of the king!"
cried a dozen voices, and then the old
door, strong as 1t had been made, gave
pcrceptbly TO the force from without.
t,,,peI In, tho woman
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1902-10-02

Special message to the commander
in chief. / must see him at once" said
/, looking at Acton In fear that the abb
solute establishment sitting on his face
would end the matter then and there.
You cannot see him now, man. He
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1902-09-13

MRS. JENNIE Z. O'DONNElL,
President of Oakland Woman's Riding Club.
the wonderful curative value of Lydia
e. Pinkham'S Vegetable Com
pound. For eight years had female
trouble, falling of the womb and other
complications. During that time was
more or less of an invalid and not much
good for anything, until one day I
found a book in my hall telling of
the cures you could perform. became
interested I bought a bottle of Lydia
e. Pinkham's Vegetable Com
pound and was helped; continued it's
use and in seven months was cured, and
since that time I have had perfect
health. Thanks, dear Mrs. Pinkham
again, for the health I now enjoy
Mrs. JENNIE O'DoNNELL, 27S East 31st
ST., Chicago, Ill. - $4,000 forfeit If aooUs
testimonial is not genuine
Women suffering from any
form of female ills can be cured
by Lydia e. Pinhham's Vegeta-
BILE Compound. That's sure.
Mrs. Pinkham advises sick wo-
men free. Address, Lynn, Mass.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1902-09-13
Arouinq on the other Side.

That there is a strong feeling in
favor of tariff revision among the Re.
publicans of Iowa, Wisconsin and a
number of other states is quite I'M
deniable. but nothing will be accom-
plished by mere general declarations
such as those made at Des Moines
Nor is there any reason to believe
that if the Republicans, to keep peace
in the party, should undertake a re-
vision at some time in the future there
would be any improvement. The tar
iii has several times been revised by
its friends and it has always been
made worse thereby.-Louisville Cou-
rier-Journal (Dem-).
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1902-09-13
Rourbons All.

Declaring that free silver is dead,
the opponents of Bryan proceed to
make the Democratic issue. And what
do you suppose it is? Free trade (eu-
phemistically tariff reform), accord
ing to the Clevelandites,
If free silver is dead, free trade is
positively petrified- The American
people have repudiated one as en-
phatically as the other.
The Hill men are not even so def
mite. With characteristic cowardice,
they fear to attack Republican issues,
having none of their own to substi-
tute. So they content themselves
with attacking Republican records
and reiterating, I'VE are Democrats -
Campaigns cannot be won on mega
ton or by discredited leaders. The
voters will not be fed on husks.-Buf-
falo Express.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1902-09-13

ear. kept his yacht in the XIII Won
Kull for almost two weeks trying to
persuade me to change my mind I
told him 1 would be only too glad to
go If George would give his consent
or would even assure me that he
would not be too lonely without me-
s'The old woman with the ears gone
wrong was q wise one, ! guess.
How delicious to see such devo-
ton nowadays she said in her deaf
voice and winked straight at Cath
crime and myself.
AFTER Uncle Dicks niece had
handed out her hard-luck story, the
lamentations ran round the board
both ways at once. The stout woman
on the right declared that If any one
two months before had dared to tell
her that she would not be on a canoe
ing trip through the Rangeley lakes
during the months of July and August
she would have laughed in the per
sons face The canoes had been pur-
chased, the guides selected and the
route all mapped out, and then at the
last moment her father had forbidden
her to go!
The deaf old lady looked wise again
and told her to go down and wade in
the brook, as there she probably could
get her feet almost as wet and would
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1902-09-13

has been accomplished He las .
much greater task on his hands IN the
present instance, however, for he must
deal with the whole trust problem and
must act within the hampering limita-
tons of Federal authority in reaching
other than corporations engaging in
interstate commerce. The greatness
of the task, the traditional attitude OF
the Republican party on the subject
of high protection, and the immediate
urgency of the Cuban reciprocity ques-
ton were quite sufficient to account
for the fact that the President did not
make an aggressive effort to secure
antitrust legislation at the last ses-
sion. Mr.. Roosevelt may not succeed
in his ambition, but he will convince
the country that he is sincere in his
desire and efforts to regulate abusive
monopolies.-Albany .Times-Union-
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1902-09-13

President Schurman said in his
Chautauqua address: THE Filipinos
wanted religious liberty, personal
freedom, freedom of speech and other
civil rights, native legislative assem-
bly,, and territorial home rule, and
these all have been conceded to
them" By whom?
Mr.. Schurman strives to create the
impression that the bill for the civil
government of the Philippines was an
anti-imperialistic measure, and that
in it's passage the anti-imperialists
won. What does he mean?
Does he mean that the men who
call themselves anti-imperialists-
Hoars, the Masons, and the Democrats
generally-who opposed the Philippine
bill, won a victory when they were
outvoted in Congress? Does he mean
that the bill which granted the Filipi-
nos all they asked for, except indie
pendence, was framed by the anti
imperialist Republicans and Demo
Gratis in Congress, and that they COM
PEELED the regular Republicans and
the president to accept it? If not, who
are the anti-imperialists who won?
The Philippine bill was from first
were differences of opinion, some Re-
publican leaders favoring the recon-
mendations of Governor Taft and
others dissenting, but the differences
were harmonized and the bill was
passed by Republican votes.
In the Senate the speeches against
the bill were made by Democrats and
the anti-imperialist Republicans
Hoar, Mason and Wellington. Forty
seven senators voted for the bill, all
Republicans except one-McLaurin OF
South Carolina. Thirty senators
voted against the bill, all Democrats
except Hoar, Mason and Wellington,
who classed themselves as anti-im-
perialists.
In the House all the speeches
against the bill were made by Demo
Gratis, and all the speeches in favor of
it by Republicans. On the passage of
the bill 141 representatives, all Re-
publicans, voted yes, and ninety-seven,
all Democrats, voted no.
The bill framed by Republicans
passed by Republican votes, and
agreed to by Republicans of the two
houses in conference, went to the
president, the foremost advocate of
expansion, in all the country, and was
signed by him.
Therefore Mr.. Schurman must
mean that the anti-imperialists" who
are known as Republicans and expan-
sionists won over the ''anti-imperial-
lists" who have from the first opposed
to the retention of the Philippines,
and who have intrigued and worked
against American control of the
islands.
In other words, Republican policy
not imperialisIic, but distinctly and
robustly American-has triumphed,
and has given the Filipinos all they
asked for, just as Republicans claimed
it would in 1899 and 1900.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1902-09-13
QUITE A WAsPY PAIR.

Two secondhand cobs with their
docks and names about eight inches
too long and rugged out in overdrawn
check reins and trotting harness fur
nished the motive power.
81 looked the horses over casually.
just to impress the proprietor that l
knew one brand from another, and
then, to show that there was no hard
feeling. l remarked:
"'Quite waspy pair you've got
there. Something you raised your
self?'
Nov that waspy, as a horse adjec-
tive, was a pretty recent one with
me. I'd only heard it a few weeks be-
fore, but 1 thought I'd try it on the
farmer just to let him see that 1 was
in the know.
The result was not as I had ex-
pected, but it was convincing He
looked at me for a moment and then
at Catherine.
They're a mite waspy in Spots he
admitted; but, Lord, they don't begin
t be nowheres near s. waspy as they
wuz, be they, Miss Catherine?
Catherine had been writing me
what a splendid horseman this farmer
was and for a moment she looked as
if sne'd tried to give a blind beggar q
bad dime. I didn't know who the joke
was on myself.
Il think Mr. B. has reference
Catherine finally explained after she
had gathered herself together, to the
into the other day in the field. They
were terribly stung."
GATHERINGS brother looked around
irir fho other oil
did you ever hear of any one get
ting it handed back to him like that?"
he demanded
1--WE reached the farmhouse" he
went on, about the time that the rays
of the western sun, as advertised in
the Bubbling Brook prospectus. were
due to fall aslant through the orchard
and all the boarders were on the front
porch to witness GATHERINGS brothers
arrival and to see if he would do. They
weren't much to look at but 1 never
ran into a group of people before with
so many rich relations.
1.-THE moment we stepped into the
dining room, the Cousin Toms, the
Uncle Dicks and the Aunt Caroryns
were hurled at us from all sides The
languid lady, who sat nearest the vase
of young onions, and who ate the car
board lettuce with her engagement
finger, started the ball rolling
'She assured the table. through the
deaf boarder next to her. that she
could not live long enough to forgive
herself for not accepting Uncle Dicks
dnvitation to cruise on his yacht
through the Norwegian fjords-
Uncle Dick. you know the Ian
guild one almost sobbed into the deaf
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1902-09-13
Roosevelt and the TRUSTS.

1t is very well for the Democrats to
make opposition to trusts their chief
issue for the forthcoming Congress
sional campaign. especially if they
combine with it a vigorous demand
for tariff reductions as applied to trust
made goods But it will be folly to
attempt to discredit the sincerity of
President Roosevelt in announcing his
purpose to deal with the trusts pro-
vided that Congress will give him sup
port Mr. Roosevelt has made a good
antitrust record He was responsible
fer the introduction and the passage
Of the law against monopolies in this
state. and through that act much good