Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1902-09-28
Nh. D00LEY TN ARCTIC EXPLORATION


tell ye, We need shave. 1t mus be
euare sinsation to wake up in tn
mornin an find that tn kid we tucked
into bed tn night befure has grown
sidewhiskers in his sleep an his feet
has pushed out tn foot iv TIL cradle.
Not FIR my money, Hinnissy. Tn
Attic regions FIR thin that like thin,
but give me a land wnere We don't tell
tn time Nv day be tn alnlynac.
But other people is different. Th'
boldest Attic explorer is a man that's
made his money out iv sellin' base
burnin' shtoves an has chillb1ains
in July. Such man is niver
continted till he's started somebody off
FIR tn northeast north. An he has no
throuble to find a man. Mex to bein'
invited on a private yacht to sail in
tn Middyteranyan, tn incest thing
a millyionaire can do f'r ye is to make
an Arctic explorer iv We. Tn premip
naries is great sport. FIR two years
We go around tn country letch'rin'
on What I Will See In tn Arctic Re-
gions Whin I Get There; If at ALL
'.Fin'lly We set off with tn fleet, con-
sistin' Nv a ship fr ye'ersilf, three FIR
tn provisions, two FIR tn Clothes an
wan FIR tn diaries. They'se also a
convoy. Tn business Nv tn convoy Is
to dhrop in at Thromsoe in Norway
an asst FIR news iv We. Thromsoe Is
wan iv tn farttest north places that
amy explorer has been. But it we'll
repays visit, bein' a thrivin' bust
lin Swede city with a good club.
Afther tn long struggle with tn
pitiliss ice machine it Is very peasant
to dhrop in Cd this hospital commu-
nifty and come back that night be
thrain. Well. as was sayin', wan
explorer starts off in a. fur suit an has
tn time iv his life an tn other ex-
plorer stays at home an suffers th'
crool hardsIlips an bitther disappint-
ments iy life in Brooklyn. Lashed to
his roc1zin' chair, he shivers ivry time
tn wind blows an he thinks iv his
hardy partner facin' tn purls Nv that
far-off region iv .ce an snow an
funny little Esqueemo women in union
garments iv fur. Hes in Greenland
now; he's battlin' with tn deadly ice
foe; now he's rasslin' with Polar
bear; he's up; he's away; he's reached
tn Pole; he's pullin' 1t up by tn
roots; bravo Baldy!' an so he goes
till his hands is chapped firm thinkin'
iv TIL cold an his leg is lame firm
tn encountner with a Polar bear, an
his rocl1in' chair is in danger iv bein'
dashed to pieces again tn threach-
erous PLAINLY. An wan day a message
comes firm tn other explorer: Rio )
Janeiro. We have rayturned baff1ed,
but not defeated. TIL picked walnuts
give out befure we reached tn West
Indies. AS far as we've gone we've
had excellent raysults. TIL cap'n, TIL
mate. tn cook. tn stewart. an 80
per clint. Nv tn crew is in ir'ns an
as soon as I got this tlilygram on
I'm goin' in to punch tn surgeon.
I lcongratylat We Ye'er name will
name will stand high among tn bin
nyfactors iv science. We have demons
sthrated beyond fear iv conthrydiction
that tn gulf sthream is JUS where 1t
was an that volcanoes amt what
they are cracked up to be. Our motto
Is: 'Niver give up TIL ship. It's too
comfortab le.' Who's ye'er banker
here?' Win tn millyionaire dies siv
exposure, "a victim to science. TIL. ma
rlners rayturns an letchers on til.
subject: 'Quarrels Il Have Had n
tho Frozen North. Talk about th.