Atlanta semi-weekly journal. (Atlanta, Ga.) 1898-1920, 1902-09-04
ID LIKE to be an ambassa-
$$R dure,' said Mr.. Hennessy.
"An' why?" said Mr.. Doc

An Why! said Mr.. DOO-
ley.
'It must be a grand job" said Mr..
Hennessy.
"'Tis an aisy job.' said Mr.. Dooley.
land tbs a gran job is We care FIR it.
But it amt tn job it used to be. tn
time was, Hinnissay. whin man that
was an aInbassadure was tn whole
thing, dye mind. He whit off to for
eign country an they was no cables
an no fast ships an he done as he
pleased an tn first thing amy Nv US
heerd iv him he'd hit tn king in tn
eye an we had a war on our hands.
Thin was tn days whin ye'd have a
good time as an ambassadure. I can
see We now mixin' in a little prOOsic
acid with tn soup Nv We er frind tn
Eyetalian ambassadure, rayceivin'
spies on tn doings iv tn prime min
isther's wife an sindin a letther to tn
king: I have tn honor to inform
ye'er majesty that If We don't do So
an'-so befure six o'clock this av'nin'
l will be obliged to bump We. Accept
tn assurance iv me mos distinguish
ed consideration an hurry up An
ambassadure dye mind, was a kind
is a prisidint Nv tn United States
Twin abroad an he done what he
thought tn prisidint would do if he
was in tn same place an tn prisidint
had to make good .f'r him.
But nowadays, we don't need an
ambassadure amy more thin we need
a stage coach to go down to Mitchi-
gan City. TIL REQUIREMENTS has chang
ed with tn time. If me frind Prisidint
Tiddy wants TO know what's goin on
anywhere all he has to do is to sub
scribe to tn pa-apers. If he wants to
do hing qhOnf IL he nbTnn
into a tillygraft office an sind a cable
message to tn king Nv BOolgahrya or
wnoiver it is that's maxim tn trouble.
To be an ambassadure all a man needs
is to have his wife want to live In
Europe; to be a first sicrety he must
be a good waltzer; to be a sicind Sic
rety he must know how to press
clothes an take care of childher. We
don't see anybody nowadays that
stands ach ant to be ilicted sheriff
thryin' to be ambassadure anywhere.
An ambassadure is a man that is no
more use abroad than he wud be at
home. A vice-priSidint iv company
that's bein' took in to be a thrust.
lawyer that tn juries is onto. a con-
gresham that can't be REELECTED.
milishy gin'ral who's family wants to
learn Fr-rinch without tn aid iv a
teacher, thim's tn kind that lands.
into tn job. No sir. If me frind in
Wash'nton liver offered to sind me to
reside at or near tn coort iv st. James
I'd asst him: ARE all tn guagers'
Jobs toOk?' No wan that loves his
fellow counthrymen as / do, an knows
this wud accept tn honor an lave his
property an good name in their care
FIR four years. While l have me vigoT
I'll remain here with me hand on tn
Il NHgHrE
ment in tn pa-apers tomorrow:
'Wonted an ambassadure ixhtror-
dhnry; middle aged. protestant gintle-
man iv good figure, kind disposition
an used to siciety; salary 50 a week
an Ar-rchey ROad'd be blocked with
applicants an they'd all be good
enough.
mo sir. it amt the job it was. 1
used to think I'd like to be wan an go
over to Rooshya an whin some good
la-ad firm this country got into
throuble over hurlin' remarks " an UNI
kind nature at the Gar to wrap him
nm IN an American flag an dhrive him
through town in an express wagon
while tn Roosyan gin'ral that was
go'in to shoot him bit holes in his
whiskers an muttered: Curse that
American dogsky. He's fOiled me be-
fure me ar-rmyr An if tn American
citizen was pinched I'd dhTive up to tn
palace in a furyous rage, push tn
guards aside an march into tn cham
Der where tn Gar sat on his throne
an say: Sign an order to release this
man in tin minyets or I'll blow up tn
fiat ARE We aware says tn Car
with blanched face. that ye're ad-
dhressin' a king? I am says l, with
me hand on tn brest iv tn uniform Nv
tn Hibernyan Rifles iv which l was
ilicted lin me mind) tn colonel befure
1 sailed. I am. dishpot.' says l. An
I says. 'ar-re We awaIe.I-L. sIys-. .Ahat