New-York tribune., 1902-10-19
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

THE TALh or THE D41
81 once heard minister who boasted from his
pulpit that he was able TO preach from any text
in the Bible offhand. without thought or other
preparation. and test of his talent in extern
poraneous speaking. he invited his congregation
the next Sunday morning to hand in any texts they
would ike him to preach from when he would
show them what he able 10 do relates The
Chicago Record Herald" I'm order that he might
not be suspected of surreptItious preparation the
passages Of Scripture to be written upon slips
of paper sealed up in envelopes and placed upon
the pulpit Immediately before the opening of the
service The next Sunday morning the pastor
came bounding in, pride and confidence cleaning
I'm his eyes. and found a number Of sealed enye-
lopes lying upon the big Bible. After the prelimi-
nary service he called attention them, and saiG
he would preach from the text contained in the
envelope that lay on the top of the pile The re-
mainder he would reserve for future Sabbaths.
Tearing it open. he uufolded slip OF paper and
read the words. addressed to the prophet
Balaam: Am not thine ass?' "
Bad Comhtnation.-"Mary" said the corner gro
ceg. well have 20 get another pint mea sure
What's the matter with the one we've got?' de-
manded his wife.
coal and the people are beginning 10 kck."-(Phil-
adelphla Press
A club has been formed in Washington 10 care
for homeless and vagrant cats. 10 provide pets for
those in search OF them. to furnish hospital for
Thomas and Tabitha when sick or crippled. and
generally 10 promote the welfare OF the feline
No doubt the mousers will be grateful and the club
may do much valuable work But why should not
deserving dogs receive equal need OF kindness
and protection?
The First Impression. Mrs Xtreme-What do
Mr.. Ntreme-is that a rainy day skirt
Mrs Ntreme-Certainly- What dii YOU think IL
Mr. Xtreme-A runfe on your waIst.-Harper's
Bazar.
capital story of parental affection, according to
The King is told by popular bishop well
known at the Eas, End FOR his work among the
poor there. A costermonger was in great trouble.
He had just lost his little son. and the good bishop
was seeking console him well he able,
when the costermouger suddenly looked up. and
IN broken voice. and with tears streaming down
his cheeks. said. "Dyc think could get the young
besgar stuffed
\ Georgia negro on being told Of the attempt
ed iynChing OF a member 81 his race IN thS West
said What old he go dar fer Why didn't he stay
at home be- lyuched whar he raise en bo'n?
Sycamore H. is the place which to keep your
eye for evidences of true enterprise. There two
editors have their lars directly across the street
from each other like kennels in opposition with
a gravel walk between. The ONCE Of the one
boasts fariug show window. according TO The
Springfield Republican" That OF the other is one
hisht up and halls back He of the show
case eeefuiIy conscious Of his superiority, offered
a prize for the largest pear peach. apple melon
squash. beet cabbage, plum and other fruit grown
about sycamore The show window soon piled
high with the kindly fruits of the earth. and the
proud editor rested his feet his desk lighted his
corucob soace ana made the last corrections in
his double headed p,ran Of praise and pity The
Roland for the oliver came with emphasis, how
ever lie of he back quarters announced in promi-
neut type that he would give prize of worth and
the bay leaves of undying fame to the fair and
cI,T baIa Irive 10
office the largest and sweetest pumpkin pie. Thus
with crafty words did he 20 about his plan. The
response was prompt and gratifying, and the pies
arrived en- masse and of good quality. show win
dow has ITS advantages. but there are compensa-
tions for its lack.
Mind Mistress , ldIsSh2Fsing a TsT sGTysno
Bridget-Faith. mum: How did yez guess thot
Oi wuz jist after leavin yez?-(Brooklyn Life
The Philadelphia Ledger has this story in
which Senator Quay and a shrewd Adirondack
native figure: Senator Quay went To the Adj
rondacks a few weeks ago to prepare for the re-
turn home OF his family. He rode up the mountain
in coach that was distressingly tardy and which
was following after another that II possible was
even slower. He chafed for time the pace.
and then hit upon plan ne thought would serve
TO speed both teams He leaned over to the driver
and offered dollar If the latter would get ahead
Of the team in front The driver smilingly agreed
and then raised his voice to say: Hey. l say
'Bill"i "Bilr', turn yer rig to the side OF the
road. will yer? There's guy here says he'll give
me dollar if l pass ye and I'll divide If you
make room.
Wedding Bells but No Ring-A rural exchange
is 'pained to chronicle the following news item:
a most unfortunate accident happened at the
wedding last evening. The groom had placed the
wedding ring in his mouth for safe keeping, as ne
was fearful of letting II fall, and losing IL being
quite nervous at the Time and as he faced the
preacher, and gulped down a lump in his throat.
the ring went with 1.-THE had swallowed itt'-(At-
lanta Constitution.
The 'Kolnische Volkszeitung" in an article
ship subsidies says: The fact cannot be disputed
that the efforts of England and America are. in
a large measure due to fear of being ecIpsed by
us And that raises the question: Are We not too
loud and pompous in proclaiming the objects Of
our ambition? Many publications from trust
worthy sources have caused Enslishmen and
Americans TO think that II is our ambition 10
capture the control of the Atlantic Could not
in the execution OF our national plans be little
more discreet and work in accordance with
Moltkss example of silence? Do We not injure
ourselves by trying to alarm the whole world
with high sounding words? According 10 our view
this would De the when We are dealing with
moneyed rivals. John Bull and Uncle Sam. We
may already be compelled give up the
because these cousins have longer life financially
than We
"A critical Expression.-Miss Gushing gton-Mr.
~ Auoef was showing us some of his sketches IN
OIL l thing his style Is just cute don't YOU?
nj. knoH-Oh. 1 wouldn't say cute exactly.
Miss Ciushington-No?
MT knpox-No; po; should say "s=tIess "-Phila-