davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1902-08-27

Be natural If you arc not what you
would like to seem, endeayor to come
as nearly to, your ideals as you can,
but do not affect q manner or char
acter that is not your own, that is not
sincere. Affectation betrays weakness
of character. 1t deceives no one. One
may imagine he is making great
impression. People are too polite to
let him know their thoughts, but they
see through him. He makes himself
less in their estimation. 1t is of no
use to assume to know that of which
one is ignorant.
There is n certain strength in hon
esty that carries weight and influence.
Integrity will make itself felt. By
making no pretenses one is on the right
road to advance. There is no fool like
the one who thinks he knows it all,
or, worse, thinks he can make others
think so. Pretenses are despised by all
sensible persons. Be true, be genuine,
and you retain your SELF respect and
gain that OF others, jlwaukee Jour
nal
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1902-08-27

POWER OF an Inch of Rain.
Slime shower we had last night
said talkative man.
yes" answered the thoughtful man.
slow much rain fell?'
'"The weather report says just an
inch"
do you know what that meansT
asked the other as he took a pencil
from his pocket and began to figure.
ut means clearing the air, laying the
dust and furnishing needed moisture
for vegetation and fof US / suppose"
but have you ever thought what 1t
means In powcr%' continued the
thoughtful man. You sad an inch of
rain. Now, see these figures. New
York city contains 308 square miles Of
surface, and one inch of water over
that would measure 715.451, 600 cubic
feet, which at 63 pounds which is the
weight of a cubic foot of water-makes
45079,372, 500 pounds, or 22,539, CSC
tons. Can you realize it?
'Now. what comes down has gone
up. and this water fell about 5000 feet.
Old Sol had quite a pull 10 get that
moisture up there, for a mechanical
engineer will tell you that that repre-
sents the expenditure of nearly $780,
O00,000,000 TO pounds of energy It's
sad that we can't hitch machinery to
that power without having to take it
secondhand through coal. New York
Herald
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1902-08-27
ENLIGHTENED THE COURT.
story of Lord Morris Daring M
an Advocate.


Lord Morris possessed an almost in
exhaustihle fund of humor, which, It
may be said, was not always appreciat-
ed In the house of lords. The following
story Is perhaps illustrative of his dar-
ing as an advocate rather than his
qualities as bumorist: On one occa-
sion an irritable judge interrupted him
In the middle of law argument by
saying testify. II don't understand q
single word sir, of your notice of mo-
ton"
mot a single wordT' said young
Morris. THAT is very unfortunate, my
lord. l must endeavor to explain"
Young Morris then read over the notice
Of motion with exaggerated emphasis.
"Sir: Take notice that ON April 6, or on
the first opportunity thereafter, counsel
on behalf of the plaintiff will apply
to this honorable court for an order
that" and so on. Now, my lord, to
proceed with my explanation. Sir
That, my lord, is the monosyllabic
mode of address adopted by the solic-
itor for the plaintiff to the solicitor for
the defendant, 1t is curt, my lord, and
Indicates that the parties are now at
arms length; but it is not discourteous.
nor does 1t preclude the possibility OF
friendly private relations between the
solicitors. Take notice This, your
lordship viii observe, is In the nature
of warning. The object is that the
solicitor shall be prepared for the ap-
pllcation, and, above all, that he shall
have an opportunity to instruct and fee
counsel to resist the motion. ON Aprn
g. That day is now past, my lord, and
therefore unavailable for the making
Of this motion. Or on the first oppor-
tunity thereafter That, my lord, is
the present occasion. Counsel on be-
half Of the PLAINTIFF That, my lord. is
the humble Individual who appears be-
fore you VIII apply to this honorable
court That is the learned and cour-
teous Judge whom / lave the honor to
address. For an order That, my
lord
But the judge had heard enough. "Go
on with your motion, Mr.. Morris" he
said, joining In the general laughter.
Il have learned my lesson. London
Law Thnaes.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1902-08-27
BloCmipgdale Items.

Mrs Gus. Morferud returned home
from Wyoming the first of last week
aftei an absence of over four months for
her health. She was greatly benefited
by the trip. Mr.. siorterud took couple
Of weeks vacation 10 go out after her
He was well pleased with the western
people and climate but missed the green
valleys aud hillsides of the Kickapoo. as
nothing grows in that country except
sage brush and cactus On the trip home
they had an exciting runaway across the
prairie In stage coach with six horses
and no driver
Oluf Melby arrived home from Val
pariso, Ind, where he has been taking a
course in pharmacy. He has already ac-
cepted position at Unseth's drug store.
at Westby, and commenced work yes
terdaY. l. K Lewis also returned from
the same school At the same time.
Oscar Morterud and wife visited mere a
few days after the wedding and left for
La Crosse, yesterday by team, they will
leave there for their home at Grand
Rapids, on Thursday. Miss Matilda
Morterud accompanied them to La
Crosse.
Tobacco harvest is row in full blast
and help is as scarce as hens teeth.
Silas Calhoun killed large rattlesnake
in the road few days ago
Mr., Escb, Inspector of rural free de-
livery routes, went over the proposed
route through here one day last week.
he states that in case the route was
laid, the Bloomingdale post-office would
not be discontinued but would be sup
piled from Weetby and that the Star
route would be discontinued.
NJ n
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1902-08-27
Times Changes.

"Diogenes was great man." said
the contemplative person, and yet be
had no use for money. He was con-
tent to contine his possessions to a sim
gle tub"
We'll" answered Senator Sorghum.
"a tub r1igh, have been all right In
those day. hut what man wants
now is bur'L"- Washington Star.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1902-08-27
Monumental nrssses.

At the beginning of the thirteenth
century 1t occurred to some one to
preserve the likeness of his departed
friend. IS wen as the symbols of his
rank and station. SO eltigies were in
troduced upon the surface cf the slabs
and were carved fat. but ere fifty
years had passed away the art Of the
sculptor produced magnificent monu-
mental etfigies. Knights and mobiles
lie clad in armor with their ladies by
their sides. bishops and abbots bless
the spectators with their uplifted right
hands, judges lie in their official garh
and merchants with the emblems of
their trade. At their feet lie animals,
usually having some heraldic connec-
ton with the deceased or symbolical
of his work-e. G., a dragon is trod.
den down beneath the feet Of a bishop.
signifying the defeat of sin as the re
suit of his ministry. The heads OF
efagies usually rest on cushions, which
are sometimes supported by two an
MAGAZINE.
A Hustler.
Junior Partner see you have en-
gagged a new assistant. Is be 4 good
salesman?
Senior Partner Good salesi1Hn!
Great snakes! l had to send for the
police to prevent him from talking me
into taking him into partnership
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1902-08-27
First publication Aug q, l902-3.
PORATE NOTICE.
Nnlice q Annlica - an Flnal 5 nttlemel

Notice u Appica ton for Final ettlement.
VERNON COUNTY CoURT-IN PROBATE
In the matter of the estate Of Tobias Car
michael, deceased
ON reading sud d'ing the application OF A. T..
f'armichasi, executor Of che LIST VIII and testa-
ment Of Tobiaa Carmichael deceased. reprr SEN
ting among other things that he has fully admin
iste red the said estate, and praying that time
and place be dxsd fer examining and sllowing &
hrs account Of his administration, snd that the
residue of the esid estate be assigned to such
persona IS are by law entitled to tue same
II is Ordered, That said application be heard
before this court st a regular term thereof to be
Ii ID st the pro5ste cisee In the city OF ViroQus,
ell The tn dsy o. Oct. 1902. AZ 10 o'clock A. NJ I;
I'd it Is Further Ordered That notice Of the
t'Tnt and place OF axanifuiug and allowing said
sc'F'uut aud 90 assigning the residue Of said
estate. be given 20 al persons IL terested, by
publication 81 H copv OF this order for three
successive weeks, in the Vernon county Censor.
Is newspaper published in said county. before
the day Fixed for said hearing.
Dated this s6lh day of Aug, 1902
BY the Onnyt, D. o. MAHoNEY, County Jugde
I'AKEN Up COW BY TIE UNDERSIGN-
l ed, Lying one mile south q EsOfea ar
three miles ~ rth OF SpFingvilie, In the TOW a
OF Jefferson. about August llth ore milch
COW red and white color. weight about 200
pouuos. The CWber + requested To call and
claim said animal and pay charges.
FoRKLE ToLLACKsoN.
Jefferson, Aug y, Is02.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1902-08-27
DIED.

THOMAS G Gaia died st his home in the
town OF Clinton, Aaa, T. aged ~ years. three
months and Is uayS. Mr.. Cole wAs born Ia
England, April 10. is33; came 80 this country
when a young man aud located on the farm
where he died Mr.. Cole had been Ia poor
health for some time. In early life he be-
came blin but for all this he did most OF his
work, Gle ring 10 acres of lard whom he
could not .Sll daylight from DARK Nj. Cole
was a men Der Of the L. h. churcn and "A good
Christian Aqd kind neighhor He was buri-
ed IA the Sugar Grove cemetery. Funeral
services n -. conducted by Rev. n Bender
OF Sparta. g. alatlveS extend thanks for SYM
pathy aud ID. c.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1902-08-27

In 1878 Frtar Bacon predicted that
flying would shortly" become a gen
eral practice. and Bishop wilkins in
1852 said. at will yet Ice rs usual to
bear man call for li ags when he
is going on journey a> it is now TO
bear him call for his boots"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1902-08-27

A certain Benedict was in the habit
of troubling his father-in-law with
complaints about his wife's behavior
Really, this is too bad" cried the
irascible old gentleman one day, on
hearing Of some of his daughters de-
linquencies. IF hear any more COM
plaints l will disinherit her."-London
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1902-08-27
Wanted TO Reneat.

LADY" said Meandering Mike. "have
you any coffee or mince pie or
Haven't you been here twice be-
foreY'
Lady. l have. I'm too good Judge
of coolin' 10 let such performances as
yours go without an encore. Wash
fnotnn Star
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1902-08-27

Il mas IS shaped ail right and his
limbs are as flexible as they should be.
be is able to scratch his own back or
reach any part Of his anatomy. Can
you do it?--Atchison Globe.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1902-08-27
A Nerv Definition.

ostend-paw. what is an underwrit-
err
Father--A a-oman, guess; at least
she is the one who always adds post
script. h.cago News.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1902-08-27

Don't have home so nice you can t
enjoy it. Many homes ara.
Time throws powerful searchlight
into the past.
The world has dozen tearers down
to one builder.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1902-08-27

Pecan Oil. the wonderful veterinary
remedy is SOL. I'D guaranteed at john
Webers shop.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1902-08-27
TIL: BLUE
FRONT STORE

m; ufacturers ia the
&C ntry. i "mem-
w, have IT, IN up TO
Z very liacst made
e. n sec to $500.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1902-05-23
FIVE KILLED ON THE RAIL
Passenger and Stock Trains Collide witt,
Terribly Fatal Results. in
Nebraska

Lincoln, Neb., May 1o.-Five men
were killed and four others more Or
less injured in collision on the Bur-
lington's Billings line Saturday. The
dead are: William Ray Tecumseh;
Neb.; w. w. Pitts, Eldarado Springs
Mo-; NJ. Tuttle Whitman. Neb.; John
Cox. Strong City, Kan; Lee Lemhart,
fireman. Slightly hurt: r. H. Sixter.
brakeman; e. E. Colvin, conductor; T.
Huston and J. Mcconnell. freight en-
gineers. Seriously injured: 0. f. Phil
lips, passenger engineer; Isaac Cox
Strong City, Kan.
All Of these, save the fireman, were
riding in tie smoking car at the time.
This car was reduced to kindling wood
in part. The collision occurred a mile
east of Hyannis between train No H.
the POrtland-St. Louis flyer, east
bound, and an extra stock train bound
west with twenty-five carloads of cat
tie. Somebody misread the train dis
Datchpr'S orders
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1902-05-23
French Cruiser Gaulois Arrives.

Baltimore, May 2O.-The French
cruiser Gaulois. which was sent to this
country in connection with the unveil-
ing of the Rochambeau statue at Wash
ington, passed in the Virginia capes
early in the day. She was accompanied
by the special squadron of reception
consisting of the battleships Kear-
sarge and Alabama and the cruiser
Olympia, which met her outside The
customary salutes were exchanged be-
tween the squadron and the visitor and
the four ships after passing Cape Hen
ry headed up the Chesapeake bay for
Annapolis. No messages were ex-
changed with the shore. The squadron
was due at Annapolis at about 5
o'clock in the afternoon.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1902-05-23
CUBAN FLAG is RAISED
TT FLIES OVER CUBA AT LAST
Displacing Old Glory, Which Comes Down
and Signaling New
Nation.

Havana, May 20.-As the sun
reached the meridian Of Havana to-
day the United States ensign which
had flown as the flag of the govern
ment in this island since 1898 came
down from the staff at Cabanas fort
ress and in it's place the Cuban ensign
was hoisted. amid the plaudits of the
multitude and the Doom Of the cannon
on land and on the ships in the har-
Dor.
AT the same moment the authority
in the island passed from Governor
General Wood into the hands of the
first president and congress of the Re-
public Of Cuba.
Thus has come the end of a strug-
gle that has lasted for fifty years.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1902-05-23
CONGRESS IN BRIEF
SynOr sis of the Proceedings in the Senate
and the HOUSEHOLDS
and ReSOlu ions.


Washington May 16.-An extended
speech by McLaurin of Mississippi in
opposition to the pending Philippine
government bill was a feature OF yes
terday's session OF the senate. The bill
providing for the erection Of 4 union
railway station in Washington and the
Notifications appropriation bill were
passed. An executive session was
held.
The house was plunged into an ex-
citing debate on Philippines affairs
The debate came as part of the ''lati-
tude of debate" when appropriation
bills are up, the naval appropriation
being the bill under consideration On
this occasion. General debate thereon
closed at p. M, and reading for
amendment had been began when ad-
journment was reached.
Washington, May 17-An effort was
made by Lodge in the senate yester-
daytO induce the minority to fix a time
when vote might be taken on the
Philippine government bill. but it fail
ed. The day was devoted to the Phil
ippines bill. Bills were passed appro-
priating $4,000 for the esta blshment
of biological station on the great
lakes; the bill regulating interstate
commerce in falsely branded goods
and ninety-five private pension bills.
An executive session was held, and ap
adjournment taken to Monday.
The house had another lively day of
debate, Philippines atrocities and the
Schley case coming in for considerable
attention, the naval appropriation be-
ing supposed to be under consideration.
A bill was passed refundng the tax
on legacies paid under the war reve-
nue. act by religious. charitable, art
and educational institutions.
Washington, May 20.-Only brief
time was devoted by the senate yes
terday to consideration of the Philip
pine government bill. DOlliver of Iowa
supported the bill. An executive ses-
sion was held.
Before adjournment yesterday the
house passed the naval appropriation
bill. The feature of the session was
an amendment adopted providing that
three of the ships provided for in the
bill-a battleship, cruiser and gunbOat
shall be built in government yards.
1t was stated positively that the ships
would cost so per cent. more built iii
government than in private yards, but
the amendment went through. An
other amendment was adopted provid-
ing that in case of a combine of ship
yards all the vessels should be built in
government yards.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1902-05-23
STRIKE rs THE ORDER
Given to 10000 Men of the Anthracite
Mines in the Great Key
Stone State.

HaZleton, Pa, May 1G.-The an
thracite mine workers in convention
late yesterday afternoon decided to
continue the strike of the $4,000 men
against the mine owners, and to fight
it out to the bitter end The matter
of calling out the engineers, firemen
and pump runners will be decided by
the delegates today The vote to con-
tinue the suspension was as follows:
Total vote cast, ST. for strike. 4G1A;
against strike. 349A; majority for
strike. 1111a. President Mitchell, how
ever, in compliance with the rules of
the United Mine Workers, announced
to the public that the action of the
convention was unanimous.
Yesterdays step taken by the miners,
after practically considering the mat
ter for two months, has wiped out the
uncertainty of the situation, and it is
freely predicted that the most serious
labor struggle in the history of the
country-if not the worlds about to
begin. That is the view taken by
nearly every miner. While the leaders
are cautious and will not forecast
their actions, it is not unlikely that
the miners fight will be carried into
the bituminOus coal regions and into
other fields Of industry. Mine workers
for eighteen months have been look
ing forward to the strike that is now
upon them. They have saved their
| money and are considered to be in
better shape today for fight than
they were in the great strike Of 1900.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1902-05-23

everything in it's path. Tie tornado
swept an area $50 yards wide for {,
distance of mile and a half. Houses
collapsed as if built OF cardboard, COW
ering the dead and injured with deb
ris, which necessarily made the work
of rescue slow. People fcCked to the
town from all of the surrounding
country. Many of them had relatives
in the city.
The work OF rescue has been carried
on steadily and rapidly. The citizens
have perfected an organization, and
the work of caring for the dead and
injured is now on a systematic basis.
The storm wrought severe havoc to the
surrounding country. but no lives are
reported lost. Governor Savers has is
sued an appeal to the mayors of ali
cities of 1900 population and over IL
the state of Texas asking them to
send food to Goiiad G d raise funds
for the sufferers.
Thirty-eight white persons were
killed, the remainder of the dead be-
ing negroes. There are nineteen white
persons and five negroes believed to be
fatally hurt
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1902-05-23
Iowa Grand Army Encampment.

DeS Moines, Ia. May 20.-The TWEEN
ty-eighth annual encampment of the
Iowa &. a. Il. has opened here with
1900 veterans present General Gren-
vile Nj. Dodge of New York arrived
from Council tufts, where he had
dedicated the KinSman monument, ac-
companied by John Lindt of Council
Bluffs, slated for department comman-
der. Department Commander Metz
ger of Davenport arrived during the
day and predicted the largest encamp-
ment in the history Of the department,
despite the deaths of the last year.
Governor S. Il. Van SAINT of Minnesoa
and his staff, accompanied by Com
mander-in-Chief Ell Torrance, arrived
at noon and were welcomed by Gov
ernOr Cummings and staff
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1902-05-23

ifornia, but it was brought here last
week expressly to be inferred where
SO many Of the soldiers of the Union
are lying.
Among the distinguished men pres
ent. in addition to the president and
his cabinet. were: General Miles, SchO-
field, OCrbin, James Longstreet. and
q large number of officers from the
regular army. In opening the exercises
Speaker Henderson, who presided, de-
livered an address, in which he paid a
glowing tribute to the personal worth
and military renown of General Rose
Grams. The presidents address was
an eloquent eulogy of the dead sol
der
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1902-05-23
GAVE NOTICE OF BOMBARDMENT
Government Forces Plan to Attack earn
panO-Decisive Battle Is Ex-
Dected Soon.


Trinidad, 3. w. l., May 2O-The
seaport of CarupanO, in the state of
BermudeZ, Venezuela, will be bonn
barded again by the government
forces. The town will be attacked
from both land and sea. The Venezue-
Ian government notified the foreign
consuls at Carupano forty-eight hours
in advance of the time intended to at
tack the port.
1t is supposed here that the United
States minister at Caracas, III. W.
Bowen, was the only foreign represen-
tatiye there who received notification
of the bOmbardment OF Carupano, ana
it is said that Mr.. Bowen urged that
no unfOrtified town Of Venezuela be I'M
necessarily bombarded. The German
cruiser GaZelle is the only foreign
warship at Carupano. She will protect
the French as we'll as the German resi-
dents there. 1t is reported here that
an enga cement will be fought soon be-
tween the revolutionary and govern
ment forces which will decide the fut-
ure of the president of the republic,
General Castro.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1902-05-23

Try the new remedy for costiveness,
Chamberlain's Stomach and Liver Tab
let's Every box guaranteed. For sale
by Perry & Doty.
Women sometimes deceive the love r
but never friend.
Fifty two weeks of contact with all
the news of our home town, county, state,
country, and all the world for SITS,
which pays for The Chicago Inter Ocean
and this paper for one year.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1902-05-23
Baby's Name.

'sBut why did you name your baby
after his most disreputable ancestor?"
young mother.
"Well, you see l expect him to i'm
prove on the former bearer of the
name. Indeed, he hardly can help it,
because the ancestor was SO very bad.
If I had named him after the most dis
tinguished member of the family, he
might not have lived up to the name.
Babies hardly ever do when they are
named for great personages, as / have
often noticed.''-New York Press.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1902-05-23
DOUBLED THE COLLECTION
A. Scotchm:sn's Scheme For Increas-
ing the Church Contribution.

ing the Church Contribution.
IN small town in England there is a
rich congregation which is not charac-
terized by lavish liberality. Time after
time the minister had .pinly appealed
to his people TO contribute more gener-
Ously to the funds of the church. The
members would indeed give something,
but it was nearly always the smallest
silver coin of the realm that was plac
ed on the plate. A shrewd Scotchnoan
who had recently come to the place end
Joined the church was not long in no.
ticing this state of affairs. and a rene
dy soon suggested itself to his practical
mind.
"I'll tell you what" he said to one of
the officials, ''if you max me treasurer
I'll engage to double the collection in
three months"
His offer was promptly accepted, and,
sure enough, the collections began to
increase until by the time he had stat,
cd they were nearly twice as much as
formerly.
"How have you managed it, Mr..
Sandyman?' said the pastor to him one
day.
cts Il great secret" returned the
canny Scot, ''but I'll tell you in conf
dence. The folk, l saw, mostly gave
threepenny bits Weel, when 1 got the
money every Sabbath morning l care
fully picked cot the sma' coins and put
them by. Moo, as there's limited
number of threepenny pieces in little
place like this and as | have maist O.
them at present under lock and key, the
folk maun give saxpences at least in
stead. Sac that's the way the collec-
tons arc doubled. '-Pearson's.