davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13
Even the clock stops To rest when it
feels all run down.

OF what does bad taste in your mouth
remind your 1t indicates thar your stom-
ach is in bad condition and will remind
you that there is nothing so good for
such disorder as Chamberlain Stom-
ach y Liver Tablets after having once
used them. They cleanse and inyigorate
the stomach and regulate the bowels.
For sale at 25 cents per box by The Win
sl0u Drug Co.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

The Negro Worlds Fair company.
originated in Alabama for the pur-
pose Of giving some great exposition.
Is now on the lookout for a city that
wants the fair. The president, II. n.
Newsome, is pastor Of the African
Methodist Episcopal church at Opeli-
ka, Ala.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

Now Is the time to provide yourself
and family with bottle Of Chamberlain
Collie, Cholera and Diarrhoea Remedy.
1t is almost certain to be needed before
the summer is over. and If procured now
may save you trip TO town in the night
or IN your busiest season. Ii is every
where admitted to be the most success
ful medicine in use for bowel complaints,
both for children and adults. No family
can afford to be without it, For sale by
The Winston Drug Co.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13
UGLIEST MAN KICKS.
Resents speech DiIating on His Quail
ificatiOns and starts General
Fight Mt n Social.

Claude Edwards won a prize at a
social at Kokomo, Ind, and broke up
the social by starting a fight.
The feature of the social was a vot-
ing contest TO decide which man in
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13
IL is unlucky to steal All opal ring
and get caught.

My little son had an attack Of whoop-
ing cough and was threatened with
pneumoLia; but for Chamberlain Cough
Remedy we would have had serious
time OF il. Ii also saved him from
several severe attacks OF croup-H. J.
SrRlcKFADEN, euitor ItOrtd- Herdid,
Fair Hayen, Wash. For sale by The
Winston Drug Co.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13
VOL. MI.
CITY DIRECTORY.

,t,... N o.. WHutou.
r... ...f>DfI NN committees.
..... Cd O.. Wicker, ". T.. Gillian
'. '.,i.r.n.. DO. D.. WALL }. B Farrar and
....r, 49, f Anderson. \. r. Craue
...f H F.fltr
..n..fr., So. o.. GILLIAN. 4. r Cralle and
.. Morris. %. r. Wicker and
....- .ls. Martin, r.. L.. Morris and W.
D. ,.. 80 r Dlmm. f.. L.. Eramhert
'..a. ..a.',- %. D.. WaIA r.. L. Erambert and W.
.. .-.. s,r.a D.. D.. tramncrt, A. e.. Craile
t.a.rfm.nf %. 4. Wicker, W r.
t'..'r'ndI K Martin.
D d. frtmNcrt, A. r. tralle and J.
h .'r AZ. rralic. o.. l.. Erambert and
h...,..I.ii h. Flrrsr. p D.. Morris and W. p.
i..re .E.I Whitehead.
...r.r s. ". Paulttt. Jr.
......-..un.r of Neteuue-f. II. &. Rice.
.. r.....f -H %. Nlller.
f.~t. fo-u~ and J. r. lison.
.f f...frI. r'Hnf-O. I. W lcker
....f T.r. N.nirfmtnf o.. VI. koheson.
-tr..f Comm .~~IUutf j. -. mart.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

This years gifts to colleges and
schools will reach a total Of SIS 200, 900.
or $4,000, 900 more than in any previous
year. In three years the money thus
contributed has amounted to SlG5, ,OOO,-
900.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13
NO. 81.
To Cure a Cold in One Day.

Take Laxative Bromo Quinine Tablets.
All druggists refund the money il il
fails to cure. +. w. Groves signature
is on each box. - cents.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

The Havana Post estimates that
10000 immigrants, mostly American
and Spanish farm workers. have land
ed in Cuba in the last three years. The
number also includes about 1000 Chi
ueSe
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

Is something rich in Old Kentucky
Nhiskey-smooth as velvet; sweet as
peach. Drop in st Hugh O'Gara's
and try 1t before the supply il exhaust
ed-and you'll have to hurry.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13
You Know What You are Taking

When you take Groves Tasteless Chill
Tonic because the formula is plainly
printed on every bottle showing that il
Is simply Iron and Quinine in taste
less form. No cure. No Pay. so cents.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

The record Of deaths by violence in
this country in 1901 shows quite de.
The Criminal crease. being 1852
n as compared with
s,275 in 1900. The
latter figures were an increase Of 2.O5t
over those Of the preceding year. II
is not possible. Of course. 10 obtain
accurate statistics on this point by
mail and telegraph. as many cases are
not reported, but they are sufficiently
accurate to indicate that crime is not
rapidly increasing in this country
lhe record Of suicides, however. tell,
another and sadder story. In 1901
7'2i5 persons "shuiiled Off this morta.
coll as compared with 6.755 in 1900
The steady increase in the suicide hab
IT, largely due TO the ease with which
poison may be obtained. this being the
most common agency employed is
shown by the following record Of cases
in a series Of years: 1890. 2.O4O; 1891
S''5l; 1892, $500; 1893, 4,436; 1894
1912; 1895, 5,759; 1896. 6.53o: 1897
6'6oo; 1898. 1920; 1899, 5.34o; 1900
G,755; 1901, 7,2i5.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

For biiousness use Chamberlain
Stomach & Liver Tablets. They cleanse
the stomach and regulate the liver and
bowels, eiIccting a quick and pernan ent
cure. For sale by The Winston Drug
Co.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

Kidney trouble causes quick or unsteady
heart beats. and makes one feel as though
they had heart trouble. because the heart is
over-working in pumping thick, kidney
poisoned blood through veins and arteries.
II used 10 be considered that only urinary
troubles were 10 be traced 10 the kidneys
but now modern science proves that nearly
all constitutional diseases have their BEGIN
ming in kidney trouble.
If you are sick you can make no mistake
BY first doctoring your kidneys. The mild
and the extraordinary effect Of Or. Kilmer's
Swamp-Ro0t, the great kidney remedy Is
soon realized. 1t stands the highest for IFS
wonderful cures ofthe most distressing cases
and is sold on It's merits E1E
by all druggists in fifty esi'7z,k x@1a
cent and one-dolar siz- ~:
es. You may have Ss1sl. E5..slIE{p 30
sample bottle by mail Home Of ssamDRoo.
free, also pamphlet telling you how to find
out II you have kidney or bladder trouble.
Mention this paper when writing Or. Kilmer
& Co., Binghamton, N. Y.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13
La Grippe Cough

cured with DR.. Davids Cough syrup of nure
flne Tar, Horehound and Wild Cherry. Best
on earth for coughs colds. cramp. consump-
tlon Bronchitis and all throat and lung troi
e Dies' Large bottle . cents at White & Co.
and Winston Drug Co.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13
Cheap nOtoriety sometimes costs d
man hls reputation.
Leads Them All.

"One Minute Cough Cure beats all
other medicines | ever tried for coughs,
colds, Group and throat and lung troubles"
says d. scott Curiu, Of Loganton, Pa,
One Minute Cough Cure Is The only az
soIulcly safe cough remedy which acts
Immediately. Mothers everywhere testi-
iy TO the good it has done their little ones.
Group is 50 sudden in its attacks that the
doctor often arrives too late. 1t yields
at once to one Minute Cough Cure
Pleasant TO take. ChIdrcnl like it. Sure
cure for grip bronchitis aud coughs:
Anderson Drug Co.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13
The Best Prescription for Malaria

Chills and Fever is bottle of GROVES
IAsrELEss CHILL Tonic. Its simply
IRON and quinine in a tasteless form
No cure, No pay. Price 50 cents.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

To the ladies and children OF Farm
vile and surrounding country. Just
try pair Of Zeigler Bros. fine shoes.
Sold exclusively by Fleming q Clark.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13
stop That Cough

before II stops you. DIR. Dayid's Cough syrup
VIII cure IT, AS numbers will testify. IL is the
best on earth. Large bottles % cents AT
White & Co. and Winston Drug Co.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

The kidneys are your
blood purifiers. they H.
ter out the waste OF
impurities in the blood.
II they are sick or out
Of order, they fail to do
their work.
Pains. achesa andrheu-
matism come from ex-
cess Of uric acid in the
blood, due to neglected
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13
Dixie Nerve and Bone Liniment

best on earth for rheumatism, strains
spralns and all pains. Unequalled for both
man ana beast. Large bottle p cents, al
White & Co. and Winston Drug Co.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

We are still selling the famous JEFF
ferson hat in all styles.
Fleming & Clark.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13
Stops the Cough and Works of the Cold.

Laxative Bromo-Q -Quinine Tablets'cure
cold in one day. No Cure, No Pay.
Price D cents.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

We always regard patience as a
virtue in the people to whom We owe
money.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

A paper chimney 30 feet high and
hreproof is one Of the curiosiiies Of
Dreslau, Germany.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

The egotist may have an impediment
in his speech, but never in his rs
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

Neckwear in the newest shapes and
colors, at Fleming & Ciark,s
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

1t sometimes takes a sprinter to
keep pace with his good intentions.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13
Over-WOrk Weakens
Your Kidneys.
Unhealthy Kidneys Make Impure Blood.

All the blood in your body passes through
your kidneys once every three minutes.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

The fellow who makes fool Of HIM
self always seems to enjoy It.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

The kleptamanac believes IN taking
hlug- into his own hands.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

Physical culture dOsen't necessarily
make girl strons-minded
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13
Read II In His NeMsnaner.

The girl with gold tooth may in
dulge IN silvery laughter.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1902-06-13

The record Of deaths by violence in
This country IN 1901 shows nnife de.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03

He had been describing the battle Of
Gettysburg-how the cannons roared,
the musketry crashed and the troops
dashed forward-and his half dozen
listeners were intensely interested.
When he seemed to have finished and
was signing over the dead and wound
ed, one of the group inquired:
"Sir, may l ask what part you took In
that memorable battle"
''I-I wasn't there at ALL" was the
hesitating reply.
"Not there? You were not particles
pant?"
'No, SIR"
"Then, how-how"-
ooh, got up early that morning and
got the papers and read every line OF
the account, and If any Of you thinks
I'm mistaken about it I've got two or
three of the old papers in my grip. Il
always carry 'em with me to settle any
disputed point
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03
Teachers Institute.

The Teachers Institute for Grant
county will be held at Lancaster be-
ginning on Monday, July 14th and
continuing for two weeks.
The teachers of, the county have
been invited and goodly number are
expected to attend.
1t is hoped that the citizens OF
Lancaster will kindly assist in enter
tanning those who desire accommoda-
tions and that the reputation of our
city for it's hospitality will be fully
sustained.
1t will be matter of convenience
if those who will entertain teachers
will drop line to Supt. c. H. Nye at
Lancaster, stating the number OF
teachers they will receive, price of
board, etc. Respectfully.
2w c.. II. NYE, Co. Supt.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03
Will of an Eccentric Man.

A rich and eccentric man who died
the other day in Berlin left will
which was to be opened Immediately
and a codicil to be opened after the
funeral. The will said: every men,
Der of my family who shall abstain
from attending my funeral shall re-
ceive 300 marks" AS a result the fu-
neral was attended by his housekeep-
err distant cousin. On the codicil be-
ing opened it was found to enact that
the residue Of his fortune was to be
divided among those who, notwith-
standing the loss of the 800 marks, at
tended his funeral. Hence, the house
keeper gets all. But the heirs threaten
to dispute the will-ChicagO Post.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03
ITEMS OF INTEREST.

Six uncles married nieces in Berlin
last year. and one aunt a nephew.
1t is forty-three years ago since the
first drinking fountain was opened in
London
At the present ratio of progress sew
enty years will elapse before Pompeii
is entirely uncovered. 1t is thought that
as much of treasure remains as has
been eXhumed.
Thirty years ago the trade coming
to ports of Peru, Chile, and Bolivia
was monopolized by the Pritish and a
few American houses. Today the Ger
mans have a monopoly in many
branches.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03
A Great Concession.

eyes," said the walking delegate,
1--WE have decided to concede the point
that ten hours shall be a days work.
instead of eight"
"Good," said the employer. eft is
necessary that it should Re so in this
business"
''But, in view of this concession, +"
continued the walking delegate, ''we
feel justified in insisting that fifty
minutes shall be an hour"
''And are five days to be a week."
asked the employer rather doubt
fully.
Later, perhaps" replied the walk
ing delegate.-Chicago Post.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03

"'How old are those six mudholes out
there?
"'Weif. 1 used to paddle around in
'em forty years ago.
"'And hasn't the town ever made any
move to fill 'em up?
"'It never has. No, them six mud
holes have grown up with us and
shared our joys and Our sorrows, and I
suppose they will continue en- for an
other half century,
"'But they must be a big nuisance,
says l.
"'They surely are
allow much would it cost to fill
them up with gravel?
"'Just exactly $14. I've figured it out
a thousand times
"'And won't the town vote the mon
ey?'
"'Never in this world
"'Would it object to my doing itY
"I don't think so; but what's your
object?
"'Just to get rid of them. Here's the
money, and Pm going to hang around
anu SGC JuC WOIh OUuc.
"WelI, it was DONE" said the G. o. D.
man, "but 1 got into trouble over it.
When those holes had been filled up
there was no longer any place for the
stray hogs to wallOw in, and that made
all the hog owners mad. There was no
longer any excitement over teams get
ting stuck, and chat hurt the feelings
of others. A third party couldn't I'M
derstand why tramp should take it
upon himself to do such a piece Of
work, and it was finally decided that
I was either lunatic or a suspicious
character. They run me into the en-
CINE house, and two doctors and COM
mittee of citizens took me in hand.
The doctors probed for evidences Of
lunacy, and when they, had finished
they differed in their reports. One Of
them reported:
He talks as sane as any man ever
heard, and it may simply be a case Of
hereditary aversion to mudholes.'
"The report Of the other was:
"I don't like his talk. He uses more
or less Latin, and when asked what
lunatic asylum he escaped from a cum
ming. expression came to his eyes. He
may not be dangerous, but it would be
as we'll to keep an eye on him.
1.-THE committee Of townsmen fired
questions at me for three straight
hours" said the dilapidated, ''and it
ended by their solemnly shaking their
heads and declaring that tramp who
had $14 to pay for filling up six mud
holes in strange town must be plan
ming the murder Of at least a dozen
citizens. l was showed into the lookup
over night, and next morning a con-
stable led me forth by the arm and saw
me a mile or so on my way toward the
next town. AS we walked up the
street I saw that all the gravel had
been thrown out of those mudholes
during the night and that the glad
hogs had returned to their wallows.
There are some things in this world
you can't beat, and one of 'em is
pastoral village with hogs and mud
holes picturesquely scattered about"
M. QUAD.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03
1T ANNOYED Him.

'Hold!' cried the transforming ira
gedian, stopping in the middle Of his
most effective speech. Then, address
ing the audience: 81 cannot permit this
violation Of precedent to go unchai-
,enged. If the man who threw that
china egg does not confine himself to
the real goods in the future, he is false
to tradition and proves himself unap-
preciative of the unwritten laws Of
true dramatic sport"
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03
THEC.O MANS WOES
MONEY RE EARNS GETS HIM INTO
A HEAP OF TROUBLE.

He Is Taken For Millionaire.
Escapes Too Much Attention and
Subscribes to Improve Village.
He Suffers For 1t.
Copyright, 1902, by c. 3. Lewis.l
AM no kicker" said the G. o. D.
e man as he pocketed the quarter
- extended to him and hitched
along to make room on the park
bench, but when a dilapidated gentle
man is driven too far he must turn and
maintain his dignity. l was making a
highway map of Wisconsin one sum-
mer when 1 ran across village with a
new town hall.
There was some trouble with the
painters, and I stepped in and handled
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03
Personal Experience.

"Do you believe in hypnotism? asks
ed the young man who never needs the
fight of time.
eyes, indeed" answered Miss Cay.
enne, 'where there are people who can
put me to sleep simply by talking to
nle."-WaShington Star.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03

Fireworks make quite a show
while they last, but they don't
last long. Its the same with
cheap jeweIry. Looks pretty q
for short time, but after that,
what have you got! We can sell
you GOOD reliable Jewelry for q
trihe more than you pay for the
cheap kind, and if it isn't salts
factory we will make it right with
you.
If it's from Barnett's It's good
=. Barr1etT,
Leading Jeweler.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03

What would be fairer than dry
day in July.
-Thos. Mcdonald was in Platte
vile Tuesday.
Mrs. j. Bieg was a Platteville
visitor Monday.
Miss Marjorie McCawley is
home from Madison.
Mrs. Elva Bailey is guest at
the Ryiand residence.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03

''My father is real rude to the young
men who call on me-" confided Miss
Keedick to Miss Tenspot. 81 don't surs
pose your papa tries to drive young
men away"
'My papa isn't rude, but he's real
mean to the young men," confessed
Miss Tenspot. HE borrows money of
them" detroit Free Press.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03
Local JOttin9S.

~~Ss~&S@SSSseSAez@
Lester Brady of Bloomington was
in the city Sunday.
Miss Kittie Frawley- is visiting
her sister in Sitter.
A politician and poor workman
always blame their tools.
Some people get so Enthusiastically
that they cannot borrow benevolent
face.
1t seems much easier for some men
TO buy things on time than to pay for
them on time.
james Smith has disposed Of his
interests in the Wisconsin river bridge
to VIM. Bieloh.
When girl marries man to re-
form him she may look for the luck
of the average reformer.
The man who stands in readiness
for the opportunity when it comes is
the only real successful man.
The man who does favor with
the expectation of receiving one in
return usually gets disappointed.
This town has some citizens who
are SO lazy they have to be worked
Just like a wheelbarrow-pushed.
Nathan Grocery Co. has 4th of
July picnic ad this week. Stock up
your basket and 60 to the woods.
About the only use some men
have for a heap is that it makes con-
venient peg to hang their hats on.
C. R. Sandlebach of Fennimore
was caller Monday. He had been
enjoying a visit with his son here.
A man may be ugly enough to
stop clock and still he can marry a
woman pretty enough to stop car.
When money is tight it is a sign
it is locked up. 1t is sometimes the
same way with some of our citizens.
A girl sometimes lets q good
chance slip while waiting for better
one, but it is different with a widow
er.
= Awomanmaynot be able to love
three men multaneously but she
sometimes makes strenuous bluff
at it.
Look at the bright side of every
thing and if it is something you are
buying it is better to lock at both
sides.
Mrs. j. D. Moscript of Milwaukee
was guest of Mrs. G. T. Dickinson
a portion of this week, returning home
Tuesday.
Many man fails to get elected
to the second term of office because
the people find him out during the
first term.
There is no truth in the saying
that woman can make q fool of a
man. Nature has always got the
start of her.
Miss Bessie McNair took her de-
parture Tuesday morning for Madi-
son, where she will take a two
months course in library work.
There are some men in this coun-
try always preaching economy to
their wives who ought to first get
something for their wives to econo-
mize with.
There are some fellows in this
town so lazy that they ought to be
treated to dose of EPSON salts daily
so that if they will not work the salts
will.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03
PrOOf MT Hand.

Borem-You can't find man any
where who enjoys joke better than
i do.
Biffkins - Guess that's right. I've
heard you tell the same old joke twen-
ty times, and you laughed every time
you told it-Chicago News.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03
Apprentice Wante d.

There is an opening at the Platte
vile Witness Office for young man
to learn the printing business. He
should have a fair common school
education Apply Immediately at
the Office or write. 19w2
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03

"Come here, Johnnie!' called his
mother, appearing at the window with
a cake Of soap and scrub brush.
"Goodby," said Johnnie sorrowfully
to his playmate. 81 gotter go an take
the water e."-Boston Post.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03
alYsiS.

She--After all, what is the difference
between illusion and delusion?
He~-Illusi0n is the lovely fancies we
have about ourselves; delusion is the
foolish fancies other people have about
themselves.-Life.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03
Vehicle of the Future,

ST hear that Gazzam is thinking Of
buying horseless carriage" said Man
haitian.
''Indeed?" queried the Brooklynite.
"And what have they named the
baby Y-Judge.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03
Only One More.

Daddy found a snake in his slip
per-"
Gail right Let him tumble it in his
boots, long with the rest Of 'em!'-At-
lanta Constitution.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03

Yves all got feelin' dat we don't
want to say anything ag'in a dead
man, but we also find ourselves wishin'
dat sartin persons could return to de
flesh fur about fifteen minits an gin
us a show to talk.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-07-03

If de mewl didn't kick back now an
den, folks would in time size him up
fur a cow or a boss an put him in
false posishun.