Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-02-06
LETTERS WERE MAILED.
But Not Until q Number of People
Had Enjoyed a Laugh at
His Expense.

snow, I'll stick these two letters
In the band of your hat sc that you
won't forget them when you go down
town this morning, as they must go
to-day" said she to her husband, the
Little Fat Man, according to the
Manchester On. H. Union.
"All right" said he, Il won't for
get them," and after breakfast he
hurriedly donned his coat and hat
and rushed out to connect with a
street car.
A lady sitting opposite in the car.
smiled pleasantly at him, and each
new arrival glanced his way, then
looked again and smiled.
Everybody seems to be in good
humor this morning." he unused, and
then he smiled himself, SO as not to
appear odd. The conductor came
along to collect the nickel. SCOT a
job in the post office, eh?" said the
car pilot with a wink.
Must be absent-minded," remarked
a gray-haired man in a corner seat,
as he nudged his neighbor and nod
ded toward the Little Fat Man.
Some people tie strings on their
fingers to remember things" OBJ
served an elderly lady with a mean
ing look in the direction of the Lit
tie Fat Man.
The car stopped and the latter got
out.
"Get on to de new letter carrier!"
yelled a newsboy to his brethren.
"Shoot de haiti"
"W'at's de tags fer?"
These and similar remarks came
from the kids on the corner.
Everybody whom the Little Fat
Man met looked steadily at him.
Some smiled; some wore a surprised
expression; others looked puzzled,
while not a few affected a wise gaze
as the Little Fat Man walked along
the street in the direction of his Of
fee.
An elderly mar with gold eye
glasses, walking briskly along,
stopped suddenly when he saw the
Little Fat Man, and was about to
speak when he changed his mind.
"Ha, ha, l see!" he laughed, and he
resumed his brisk walk.
Nov, I wonder what ails that fell
must have Wheels"
A stout lady with an armful Of
bundles came along, and when she
saw the Little Fat Man she started
suddenly, dropping a bundle OF two.
"Allow me, madam" said the Little
Fat Man, as he picked up her bundles.
The stout lady thanked him. Then
she laughed merrily, poking him in
the ribs with her umbrella. 81 see,"
she said, you're just like all the rest
of the men,"
The Little Fat Man stood still and
gazed at her. The stout lady oozed
away down the street, turning and
smiling at him till she disappeared
around a corner.
"Eyerybody's got 'em this MORN
ing" said he. "Wonder what insane
asylum is giving it's inmates a Holt
day now. Gee! l begin to feel queer
myself. Hope I'm not going bug
house."
A young and pretty lady pranced
up to him and laid her hand on his
arm. 81 beg your PARDON she be-
gan, but that was as far as she got,
when he interrupted and said to her
in a kindly tone of voice: Eyes, yes.
l know all about it, my dear young
lady-run right along now"
She appeared offended and switched
saucily away from him.
The Little Fat Man turned into the
doorway of the building in which his
office is located, and as he mounted
the stairs he muttered to himself:
cts no use, l guess I'll have to go
and see a doctor. I've either got 'em
myself or else everybody else in town
is crazy"
He walked into the office, but had
no sooner stepped inside the door
when his business partner burst into
a hearty laugh. Ha! ha! ha! he! he!
he! Say, old man, did you come all
the way downtown in that fore-and-
aft rig? Ha! ha! ha! ha-a-a! That's
where my wife puts 'em sometimes.
Look in the glass, old mani"
Then the horrible truth came home
to the I1ittle Fat Man. He grabbed
his hat from his head and saw the
letters sticking up wing and wing in
the hatband just where his wife had
placed them.
RITS OE EEMTNINTTv