West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1902-02-27
THE JERICHO POSTOFF|CE,
AND THE CASE OF THE WIDOW
HARRIS HOG.
Whether II Should be Allowed 10 Run
Mt Large or Not.


and lot and hog. 1t was a hog he
had in the pen aud was going TO
turn into pork that fall, but during
the widows grief the hog got out and
ran at large, and for the next year
he was roofing around the streets of
the village. 1t was against the or
dinance for live stock to run at
large, but everybody felt sorry for
Sans widow, and the hog was not
disturbed. 1t was only when Josiah
Flint was made village marshal that
the old black porker was driven off
to the pound one day. There were
folks that said it was right and folks
that said it was wrong, and there
was so much feeling about it that
after two or three days public
meeting was called. There was a
big turnout, and the first speaker
was Squire Flatbush. The Squire
always starts every one of his
speeches with the landing of the Pill
grims and gradually works down.
1t was so in this case, and he work
ed up hogs and Pilgrims in pretty
good shape. He was for the law.
He was sorry for the widow and
sorry for the hog, but .law was law.
If the widow Harris black hog
could run at large, then the same
privilege must be granted widow
er's COW. He had no personal
feeling in the matter at all, although
he had stumbled over that hog on a
dozen different dark nights, but he
must range himself on the side of
the law.
Abraham Fuller came next. Abe
had an undelivered Fourth Of July
address that he had been holding on
to for several years, and he had de-
termlned to ring it in on this occa-
sion. He began with the battle of
Lexington, and he got clear down
to Benedict Arnold before he
brought in the hog. From that
time until the colonies won their
independence, liberty and the wild.
ow Harris, the American eagle and
that black hog were sandwiched in
to make a powerful speech of it,
and when he closed it was amid APP.
plause. Had a vote been taken
then the hog would have been re
leased, but there was a delay of two
or three minutes, and it was fatal.
Moses Taylor got his feet under
him and rose up and began on that
speech of his about the rise and fall
of the Roman Empire. He had
got it off dozen times before, and it
had always weighed ton. Moses
was the only man in Jericho who
was way up on the Roman Empire,
and he knew it and made the most
of it. In IL minutes he created
and destroyed the Empire and
knocked out the widows hog, and
his oratorical effort was decided to
be equal to anything of Clay's.
Philetus Schemerhorn was next to
plead for the hog. He said he
didn't want to mix hogs and widows
up together, but on this aston it
was difficult to separate them. On
the one hand we had a widow sitting
by her desolated hearthstone and
weeping over the loss of a porker
and on the other hand a porker in
the village pound grunting and
wailing over its lost liberty. He
went back 8, years to prove that
widows had always been objects of
public sympathy and mad been Civ
en- more latitude than other folks,
and he took the early history of
Egypt to prove that hogs had been
allowed to run at large without pro-
testation. The carriage of queens
and expresses had turned aside for
hogs lying in the roads, and kings
and emperors had stumbled over
them as they lay stretched out on
the sidewalks. 1t was telling
speech, and public opinion wavered
again.
Ebenezer Schoolcraft had ranged
himself with the antihog- antiwidow
| party. lie had resurrected DO
litical speech he made when Gen
eral Grant was a candidate for
second term, and when Philetus sat
down Ebenezer rose up. Every
body was wondering how he could
swing the hog into the speech, but
he did il as handsome as you please.
and made it tell. II VS. over half
hog, and had there been a campaign
on it would have elected whole
county ticket. When he had con
cluded and sat down with a broken
suspender, there was a general feel.
ing that the widows hog would
never emerge from the public pound
until The fees bad been paid ln cash.