Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1902-11-06
OUTSIDE POINT OF VIEW

( W. JAVA O2ANA WI aAV I
(eo~o~~>~~~~>o
| Mrs. IS. looked over her spectacles
and thus she spoke: Ladies and gen
tlemen, | have in my hand one of the
| big Chicago dailies. Following the adj
vice Of the head of this family, l am
now reading the daily papers. Altho
late in the day, / am trying to lift my
self to higher plane. to elevate as 1t
were my mental quality to par with
the astute philosopher who sits oppo-
site. l see now how much l have missed
in the years gone by in not daily abb
sorbing from the press the thinlsy
thoughts of the hour. If, in my pursuit
of knowledge, had omitted what /
shall shortly read to you, what a loss
would have been mine. Think of it, Mr..
Birdseye, new use for man has been
found. Even use for an invaded man,
a vocation for Emphatic man. Now
while the rescurceful wife of sick
husband can take in washing, go out
sewing. or act as book agent, all this
to support the family, including the in
valided, Emphatic or sick husband.
there is now, especially in agricultural
Iowa, chance for the man to assist
in adding to the family income. En-
core" remarked the writer.
when order is restored" said the fe-
male orator of the evening, 81 will read
this press despatch from Eminence,
Ky:
John F'ilson, farmer, living seven
miles south of here, is the proud father
of forty-four little chickens, but much
of the credit for his achievement as a
human incubator is due to the practical
bent of his wife's mind. For months
past Filson has been Ill with low fe-
Yer. He was the sole support of his
family, and the affairs of the household
became sadly straitened
"'As the weeks passed and there was
no sign of improvement, the woman
became desperate. but inspiration at
last came to her and she decided to
utilize the husbands bodily heat in or
der to help out the family's strained
resources. Borrowing four dozen eggs
from a neighbor. she placed them in
he'd with her husband, but SO protected
that they would not be crushed by his
movements. The experiment proved
successful and at the end of four weeks
the setting was finished. Only four
eggs failed of results.
"'Father and chickens are Growing
over their good luck and Filsons fever
has begun to Subside."
Before you arrange the ping pong
table Mr.. Birdseye." continued the,
newspaper reader. unless you have
on RI 10 off r oh TO RI
tell another story of even more start
line use for man. While this printed
account is of mans usefulness while
sick what I am about to relate shows
that even after life's fitful fever is DER
some men can be more useful than
when they occupied space around the
family stove. l know this story is true
because 1t has been told every five
years since 1907, when it happened. 1t
is always located in Connecticut, and
on Long Island Sound 1t seems there
was a ne'er do well sort of man liv-
ing in Rocky Point, whose only oc-
=cupat ton was to catch fish, and then
only what the family could consume
And 1t was common remark that his
wife had to dig the bait before he would
start out. Well, one day the fisherman
did not come back. An empty boat was
only the too true evidence that he was
drowned, AMI the widow mourned his
loss. Perhaps 1t was six weeks after,
one day, a sad and solemn looking pro-
cession was seen approaching the
house. The poor widow"
"Mrs. Birdseye,' said this scribe,
well draw the line right here. That
| eel story can not be told in this room,
or in this house. If you have no regard
for the sacred things, I have. Again, 1t
has been printed IN some down east pa
per every five years since l was a boy,
and every time / read 1t I know some
woman's rights woman is improving
her opportunity to ridicule the opposite
sex" what is the story?" asked Ser
aphina MY dear child" said the
writer, "this is the one case where ]
| can not say ask your mother. In the
| first place it is unfit for repetition. IT
| is improbable on the face of it, cells do
not seek eff it is such an improba-
BILE story, let me give 1t as fairy tale,''
remarked the reader of the egg story
| MADAM" was the reply. much learn
ing hath made thee mad" I'm not half
so mad as that fisherman's wife was
when she discovered that the process
sion was" Goodnight, madam" said
the writer IF you wish to regale the
audience with the worst fish story ever
| invented. my presence will not sanction
such an outrage to decency." We'll
| supposing that woman did tell those
men to-" continued the persistent
story teller. Pleasant dreams, mad
|