Butler citizen. [volume] (Butler, Pa.) 1877-1922, 1902-05-01
TT LACKED NOVELTY
A COLLECTION OF HEIRLoOMS THAT
WEARIED AN OBSERVER.

WEArlEO 6N OOOChNGn.
The System of Renting Out Family
Clory and Supplying Ancestral
Trnppings at So Much Per Hour
Has Its Drawbacks.
Two guests were being shown through
Philadelphia mansion in which
nouveau richie broker was entertaining
a party Of fashionable friends. The
splendid array of family heirlooms, all
bespeaking a lineage Of earliest colo
nial origin, deeply impressed one of the
party. He was stranger but lately
arrived from Baltimore. Oddly enough,
his companion, Philadelphian, SEEM
ed fiippantly Indifferent to these treas
ured relics Of a family's honored his
tory.
Remarkable collection of heirlooms
our host has," remarked the stranger
as he stopped before a battle SCARED
sword of Revolutionary days.
"Yes," drawled the Philadelphian
cynicalIy, Every interesting. But I'M
fortunately it lacks the charm OF nov
city for me. Already this season I've
seen the same batch of relics In three
other Philadelphia houses"
How could that beF'
"Oh, simple enough. 1t only means
that all four families, our host and the
three others l refer to, hired their an
cestral trappings from the same man."
"Hired themr
Eyes, hired them. We have in this
city an enterprising collector Of colo
NAL junk who makes a business OF
renting out family glory to all who
were unfortunate enough to be born
without it."
"Wheww was the only comment the
astonished Baltimorean could utter.
And doubtless many Philadelphians
would be moved to say "Whew" II
they could learn how many members
of the Quaker City social elect are con-
strained to seek the assistance Of the
heirloom dealer when they wish to
give brilliant function.
1t is deception that is forced upon
them, for unless you have distinguish
ed appearing ferbears you stand little
chance of penetrating the sacred pre-
cincts Of the local fashionable set.
Ancestry, not cash, Is the open ses
anne. and even If a man can claim some
sort of family tree his pretensions are
questioned unless he can show some OF
the furniture or portraits that his
American forefather brought with him
on the Mayfower or the Welcome.
OF course IL the two vessels named
had been as large as the Great Eastern
and had been loaded with nothing but
heirlooms they couldn't have carried
half the stock needed to launch the de-
scendants Of Pilgrim fathers into so
ciety. Hence the need of an heirloom
dealer.
He has his warerooms in Pine street.
in q part Of the city which was once
the center of fashion, but is now de-
serted by that element In consequence
of the westward movement Of the city's
elect
Ostensibly he is curio dealer, but
mis- revenue is mainly derived from
furnishing and hanging the walls or
fashionable dwellings with century old
portraits.
This clever manipulation OF mems
vanities has ancient, straight backed
furniture and copper kettles and snuH-
ers for candles and bullseye watches
and similar relics of ancient grandeur,
all at your disposal for night, when
you. poor fellow, with money. but no
ancestors, want your friends to know
what an old family yours Is! He also
has rare furnishings for libraries and
drawing rooms which you may rent II
you have the price.
1t matters not from what part OF the
country the applicant halls OF what
particular descent he wishes to claim,
his needs are promptly filled.
For those who wish to pose as lineal
descendants of the stanch old colonial
patriots who fought the stamp tax and
defed the power Of King George ct
Bunker Hill and drew up the Declara-
| ton there is especially attractive stock.
For the naughty cavalier who "came
over" with Lord Delaware there are
costumes and furniture and portraits
of more elaborate style. as BELTS the
past Of emigrants who in England
basked In the favor Of the king and
we're participants in brilliant court GER
| emonials.
The Quaker City allegiance to the
| bonored memory of William Penn Is
| sentiment that the curio dealer has
| been careful to cherish.
| On his walls he has portraits or stu
/ dious looking Quakers. On his shelves
| are modest Quaker clocks that did
/ service in the days when the founder
| was exchanging thirty blankets for
Philadelphia.
There are Quaker walking sticks, tin
der boxes. documents on all, subjects
| household utensils legion.
1t Is true that this system or supply
Ing ancestors has Its disadvantages.
Contretemps such as the one revealed
at the beginning Of this article are
bound to occur. The hawklike eye OF
connoisseur, trained to recognize in
stantIy the value, authenticity and his
tory of antiques, often pierces the de-
ceptlon and remembers seeing the
treasured family heirlooms" some
where else. But in the main people
are gullib,o, and the wealthy but pie
beian aspirant for social honors vaunts
the blueness of his blood and points
with pride to his hired heirlooms with
out much danger of discovery.
| And meanwhile the crafty Pine
street dealer smiles, wakes rich and
echoes a celebrated remark Of Puck 8
regarding the average intelligence of
mortals.-Philadelph North Ameri-