davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06

never saw any Ills own hOStler ana
man so radi- errand BOY.
cally and thoroughly depressed. so
completely STEPPED in the bitter wa
tiers OF hopeless despair. The sur
sroundings, even, were eloquent of
fiat, prosaic failure I found him ut
terly alone and sitting in an old rock
ing chair doing absolutely nothing but
broOding over his griefs and political
discontinue. He was in his office, one
of the most neglected and ungarnished
Offices in the state.
My feelings were in unison with his,
and our conversat ton was as cherries
and dismal as the somber and melan-
choly surroundings, and yet in twenty
two months from that doleful and
gloomy day this recipient of fortunes
frowns had sounded the highest note
in the gamut of ostensible and appar-
ent success, for. 1857, 61O citizens. en-
bracing the elite of the nation. had
elected him to be the ruler of 100000
900 people.
And his early career as politician
may be thus exhibited: On April q,
1882. he was elected to his first office
that of captain Of a company in the
Black Hawk war. In 1888 he ran for
the legislature and was defeated. but
he was elected currently thereafter for
four successive legislative terms. In
1884 he was appointed by President
Jackson as postmaster of the incon-
siderable hamlet of New Salem and
by John Calhoun to the inconsequen
tial position Of deputy surveyor OF
Sangamon county. He was an unsuc-
cessful competitor for nomination for
congress in 1844-if not also before
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06

So together we tramped at least four
blocks, and though the town seemed
to be deserted it struck me as some
not human being appeared to recog-
nize my companion. although he was
so marked figure and the foremost
man Of his party. He reached the ho-
tel utterly exhausted. In an hour, at
the outside, the meeting would be over
and crowds trooping to see him. At
my suggestion be asked for another
room than the suit engaged for him.
There was none vacant. but the clerk
upon finding out who wanted it oblig-
ingly put his room at Mr.. Lincoln's dis
posal. helped him to it. Then he
got his boots off, bound wet towel
around his head and stretched himself
on the bed with q sigh of relief. After
thanking me warmly, he said: Tell
them not to disturb Ine. will be
down stairs as soon as am rested. I"
l knew, however, that that would be
futile and acted on my own judgment.
Going outside, / locked the door, then
AuuS IAO hSy UdCh OHCl tuC IL duSOul.
! Until he himself chose to reappear, re-
freshed and ready, only the clerk and
us two knew Of his whereabouts, al
though, as may be guessed, a pretty
pother set up when people found his
regular rooms wide open and himself
conspicuously absent.
At Alton, Oct. Is, the great debate
came to a gala ending. I can make
no approximation even to the number
of people who saw it. They were there
in myriads, in clouds it seemed. St.
Louis, but a little way off, sent TEEN
ing thousands. Every city, every con-
siderable town even, Of Illinois fur
ished delegations Of both parties to
swell the swarm. There were many
likewise from the Missouri Towns, and
from Indiana and Kentucky.
Both Lincoln and Douglas were like
schoolboys who have finished to their
own complete satisfaction some extra
wearing task. They met when the
last speech was made at the house of
a mutual friend, the Hon. Robert
Smith.
2
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06

lost my apple cverboardp' Trivial mat
tiers amused him equally with those Of
greater stamina. Along experience with
wit and badinage had not made callous
or blunted his sense Of the ludicrous.
Thus at the Bloomington convention
he had occasion to introduce the court
ly, polite, exquisite Browning to the
coarse, irreverent Wentworth. 'sI've
heard much of you" began the prig.
I'D much against me, I reckon!"
blurted out the boor. Lincoln was
wont to laugh over this very often.
Many Of his stories were comparisons
of the situation in hand with some
thing that happened down in-some-
where. That's like the man down in
Indiana" was frequent introduction.
Thus, when after long interval of 81
lence he received news not altogether
favorable from Burnside, beleaguered
at Knoxville, he neither lamented at
the untoward aspect of the news nor
enthused at getting news at all, but
simply said, That's like Sallie Ward,
who had thirteen children, that were
accustomed to stray out into the woods,
from the depths Of which would occa-
sionally float an infantile cry Of disas-
ter, when Sallie would exclaim, Thank
heaven, there's one Of my children
what amt dead YETI
In order to illustrate the moral un-
cleanliness Of certain unsavory politi-
clans he was reminded Of a "feller"
who applied to physician for advice
in and about a cutaneous disease. He
needed very simple remedy, so pre-
scription was given him somewhat
thus: "R. Sapon. CASTLE OF. 8. Aqu@
purR GAL Y. Misce. Apply to all
parts of the body with a sponge and
wipe dry with a towel" ''That simply
means washing mey' exclaimed the
dirty sufferer. 1T certainly is open to
that objection" replied the physician.
In q similar vein he took the starch
out of a vainglorious applicant for a
minor Office who, in order to magnify
his Importance, hove in quite unneces-
sarily the suggestion that he sprang
from one Of the leading families of
Vermont. Never mind" said the jo-
cose president: ''that won't be very
much against you.'
So, in order to illustrate the well
known aphorism that the remedy pro-
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06

his solitary THE long procession"
friend. each of them being over six
feet tall. But there was no meeting
The town, being composed chiefly OF
Kentuckians, rejected his political ide-
ais and by preconcert systematically
and unitedly kept away.
l will now afford a glimpse at the
diverse face of the medal. Within a
few days after the Inauguration OF
March 4. 1860, sat with the great
president and young friend in front
of the fireplace, in which was d
hearth fire. in the executive Office at
Washington. l had called to ask that
he give our mutual young friend the
secretaryship to sign land patents.
Strange to relate, he had been in Office
but few days and yet he appeared
quite as miserable and gloomy as on
the 5th Of January. 1859, heretofore
narrated He had been unreasonably
found fault with by the press and
politicians for the alleged improper.
bestowment of some early appoint
ments. and his sensitive nature was
stirred to its profoundest depths. 1t
was singular that SO virile and cour-
ageons a nature in grave matters
should have been so supersensitive
about comparative trif1es. He conclud-
ed our interview in these Identical
words: ct is an awful thing to say.
but wish I was back home in peace
and some one else was here in my
place"
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06

+" NJ r. LINCOLN'S career exem.
M M plifies the truth and aptness
N\Iil of the pOetical trope that
IyII man is a pendulum be-
II " II tween smile and tear"
he at one moment being
given over to the abandon and license
OF unrestrained and exuberant humol
and Immediately thereafter being
plunged into the Zimmerman darkness
OF the most dense and impenetrable
melancholy. What he felt and expert
enced during the regnancy Of the latter
condition will never be known or even
inteliigently conjectured. His sombe1
mood was the voiceless tomb of ex.
preston and condolences, but he shared
the Zest and exhilaration Of his excur.
sions to the shrine Of Thalia OF the
fame of Joe Miller with all mankind.
So far as dignity and the fitness OF
things are concerned, the outside world
might consider that he mixed jokes and
business too Intimately. 1t certainly
does not appear fitting that he should
Introduce the first reading of the eman-
cipation proclamation to his cabinet
with Artemus Wards story of thigh
handed outrage at Utica" but we can't
know to what extent the strain of for
mulating SO mighty an event was neu-
tralized by brief sojourn in the
realms Of nonsense.
Equally doubtful, if true, was the
prOpriety Of his alleged response to
Lord Lyons upon the diplomatic en-
counter to announce the incident Of
international import-the marriage of
the Prince of Wales. To the formal
speech Of the ambassador announcing
the august event the great president is
reported to have replied to the bache-
]or minister. Lord Lyons. go thou
and do likewise" If such an incident
happened, it is not garnered except by
the left hand of history, but it is
strictly Lincolnian and might we'll
have happened anyway. Great and SOL
emn occasions did not repress or dead
en- his propensity to joke. Thus at the
Hampton Roads conference, as he and
Seward entered at one end of the small
cabin of the steamer River Queen, he
saw the diminutive Stephens at the
other end in the act of emerging from
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06

soWn. In practice, however, it APP
pears that the progress Of the success
full and unsuccessful alike is strewn
with current misfortnnes, humiliations,
checks and disasters, and that the ad-
venturer who shall have attained the
goal of ultimate defeat may neverthe-
less have been highly favored of for
tune in life's journey, while the laurel
ed victor may have trodden the wine
press Of humiliation and defeat all of
his days but the last.
Mr.. Lincoln's career as business
man may be thus summarized: After
practicing law and living in the most
frugal and economical manner for a
quarter Of century, being meantime
his own hostler and errand boy and at
tending to his own woodpile, coward
and pigpen himself, he had accumu-
lated $4,000 worth of property when
he was elected as president of the Unit
ed States, and having consumed his
capital for current uses in living during
the months preceding the Inauguration
he was compelled to borrow every cent
of money which he had in his pocket
when he started to Washington and
which he repaid out of the earliest re-
ceipts from the presidential salary.
On Jan. S. 1859, the day of Douglas
last election to the United States SEN
ate by the Illinois legislature, 1 was
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06


dent, the president promptly replied,
''As to that l don't pretend to be well
versed in history. and therefore I re-
fer you to Seward for details, but all
that | recollect of the precedent you
cite is that Charles lost his head in the
end" That was answering fool ac-
cording to his folly and is the best in
stance of apt repartee on record
Now, the essence of the first of these
River Queen jokes was pure fun and
nothing else. while the essence Of the
last one was strictly utilitarian-was
absolutely demanded by the situation.
It put Hunter and his proposition out
Of the ring. put him to Sleep" to use
modern slang. 1t ended the Confeder-
ates' function completely. But he some
times went further in vanquishing an
opposition than the bounds of good hui
NOR required Thus, when a deputa-
ton of rich men from New York wait
ed on the president in a dark hour of
the nations tribulation, begging for a
gunboat to protect New York harbor,
he manifested the utmost Impotence
Auu dIuOSI PAL yACu luSu Will ILLS
reply, 81 am straining every nerve to
meet the requirements Of the army and
navy at the front, and l have no gun
boat to give you; but If was half as
rich as you half dozen men are and as
scared as you pretend to be l would
furnish the gunboat myself instead Of
begging the government for what it
amt got to spare"
He very rarely made either himself
or any one else butt for joke, and
certainly never in malice. His humor
was usually impersonal. Once, how
ever, at City Point little discussion
arose as to what religion Halleck, !
think, professed. II think he's an Epis-
copalian," said Lincoln, because he
swears just like Seward does, and Sew
ard is an Episcopalian."
More in unison with his methods
was his story to illustrate why he did
not fill certain vacancies, thus: A boy
was making a church out of mud.
Having got it substantially completed,
ne was asked why he didn't also make
minister for it. "Kase hain't
got no mud left" was the obvious an
gWer.
In a similar vein, when a dash Of the
snemy cost the government three brig.
E d ~ .. ~. 49,.
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06
BY II. G. WHITNEY
Copyright, 1902, by H. c. whitney.

quite an expense engaged band Of
music, rang the bells and employed all
the means which enthusiasm and enter
prise could suggest in order to attract
large audience, including the then
primitive practice of blowing a horn
The hall of the house of representatives
was lit up to it's full capacity, and no
effort was omitted to insure success ia
that enterprise. But the evening adj
vanced, and up to a late hour but one
man came except Lincoln and his part
ner, the ever faithful Herndon. LIN
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06

found him utterly litical arena in
alone. 3TIIinois nm 70
that date. It placed him on the high
est pinnacle of fame as an imprisoned
and effective orator. Three days there
after he and Herndon, his law part
ner, deemed it proper to ratify the pro-
ceedings Of the convention. at which
such marvel of political oratory had
been achieved, and accordingly at
Springfield. Lincoln's own home, Hern-
don Got ont huge posters and at
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06

coin, somewhat
amused and quite
chagrined, made
a brief speech,
thus: "Gentle-
men, this meet
ing is larger than
I knew it would
be. I knew that
Herndon and my
self would come.
but I did not
know that any
one else would be
here, and yet an
other has P0ma-
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06

and in the year
1916 he was both
nomina ted for
and elected to a
seat in congress.
On May %,
1856, Mr.. Lin
coin made his
renowned speech
beforethe Bloom
ington conven-
ton, known to
a high fame as
the" lost speech, !"
which was the
highest oratoric-
al triumph that
had been exhib-
tied in the no.
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06

says it depends
entirely on the
manner Of it's
n a r "a ito n
while wit de-
ponds on the
essence Of the
matter. And
this distinction
is not pedantic
as applied to
Lincol n, for
even his stories
need the inspi-
ration of his
a c t j Q n t o
achieve their
browning ner-
it, and, as to
the essence Of
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06

Union men for
forag e, etc., TAX
en- by the army
reminded him Of
Captain Jack
Chase, who used
to pilot a small
boat through
the rapids Of the
Illinois river.
w lille in the
very midst Of
the boiling cur
rent a small boy
tugged at the
pilots coattail
a n d shouted,
"Cap'n, stop de
hoot For Two
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06
How Lincoln Paid a Board Bill.

While Mr.. Lincoln was studying law
at Petersburg, Ill, he and a friend
pamed Hanks, also a law student,
boarded at Alfred Gordon's house. He
was an old friend Of the Lincoln fam
lily, and as he did not charge the young
men anything for board they under
took to make rails enough for his two
farms.
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06

APPLY says that ''the essence of humor
is sensibility-warm, tender fellow feel
ing, with all forms of existence. =
Unless seasoned and purified by humor
sensibility = /" will readily corrupt
into disease, falsehood or senti-
mentality
And Mr.. Lincoln's penchant for hui
NOR was not an inane diversion, but
was the fringe and passementerie Of a
great crisis in government
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06

a huge overcoat.
Said he soto
voce to Seward,
did you ever
see such a little
nubbin in such
a big shuck ?"
SO. too. during
the progress of
t h a t famous
co n f ere nee,
when H. NJ. Il.
Hunter urged
the president to
treat with the
Confederates,
citing the exam
pie of Charles
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06

alone With Mr.
| Lincoln from 2
O'Clock till late
bedtime, and l
feel authorized
to say that no
m a n in til e
| state was so
gloomy, defect
ed and dispirit-
ed and no man
so surely and
heartily deem
ed his life to
have been an
abject and lam
entable failure
as he then con-
sidered his to
have been. I
rnv0n cn- 0--
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06

host started for
the grove which
was to be the
scene Of the meet
ing, their way
leading through
the village. The
man was almost
staggering under
the weight of the
flag and its staff.
and Lincoln did
not realize the
righteousness of
the situation I'M
til he heard some
of the town peo-
pie commenting
upon the "long
procession" it be-
ing Lincoln and
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06

story, story. story, and the countr,
gong to hi! It amt a mile from hi.
TINS minute!' "Just the distance t
the capitol," said the amused president
as the irate senator rushed out, trying
20 put his hat on the floor and his cane
on his head.
AS to the form of humor. Mark Twain
N MS essay on "How to Tell Story
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06
Lincoln,s Appearance.

Lincoln was as unusual in PERSONAL
appearance as In character. He vast
muscular in frame, 6 feet inches tall
and weighed about $50 pounds. His,
hair was black and luxuriant, eyes
brown, nose long and mouth large.
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06

posed by the
situation was
worse than the
exigency it
was proposed
to cure, he was
minded Of
the man down
i n willie
who had occa-
sion to head up
a hogshead. but
did not clearly
discern how to
keep the head
in posi- tion
while he tight
ened the slaves
by driving the
y
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06

The usual and ordinary belief is
! that the career of the ulti-
i mately successful man is an
i uninterrupted and unbroken
u series of current successes
from zero to affiuenca nr re-
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06

Sut brilliant expedient struck him. He
then placed his young son in the hogs
head, where his height just served to
keep the recalcitrant heading in place,
when he adjusted the head properly,
and the experiment seemed to be sue
cess till the imprisoned boy yelled, Let
me out Of herey'
Once he came In official contact with
Judge Baldwin, the author Of the hui
Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1902-02-06
BY HUBERT NORTHERN
Copyright. 1902, by w. L. Vain.

M NJ r. LINCOLN'S career exem-
| M IN plifies the truth and aptness
| N\Ii Of the poetical trope that
tI\YII IMAM is pendulum be-
II ~ II tween a smile and a tear"
Tazewell Republican. [volume] (Tazewell, Va.) 1892-1919, 1902-04-03
Death of Thomas Dunn English.

DR.. Thomas Dunn English, the poet
died on the LIST. inst. at bis home in
Newark, n. ]. He was the author Of
"Ben Bolt" and number other pretty
poems. among them the logan Grazier, y
which we reproduced in our columns
about two years ago. When he wrote the
Logan Grazier" he was living at Tszewell,
then Jacksonville. That poem was first
published in the old Richmond Enquirer.
Mrs. Kate Peery hasa copy of the Logan
Grazier" clipped from the Richmond
Enquirer at the first publication of the
poem, which was about the year 1888.
There are very few persons now living
in Tazewell county who remember to
have seen DR.. English. He was not only
graceful and beautiful writer but an
eloquent speaker. In recent years be
served two terms in Congress, being eIec-
ted from one of the New Jersey districts.
Tazewell Republican. [volume] (Tazewell, Va.) 1892-1919, 1902-04-03
DANGERS OF ACETYLINE GAS
Reading Coroner's Jury Condemns the
Use of the Machines.

READING, March 3O-The Coroner's
jury that investigated the death of Daniel
NJ. Heller, and Mrs. Mary ROLAND, who
who were killed in the explosion that
wrecked two Penn Street buildings fur
weeks ago, after hearing fiftytwo witnesses
and celebrating until this morning, agreed
upon verdict that the deaths were due
to an explosion of acetylene gas, the ex-
plosion being caused by fire.
The verdict concludes as follows: 1--WE
condemn the practice Of placing and
maintaining acetylene gas plants in bull
dings where persons live or are employed.
We recommend that City Councils enact
and have enforced an ordinance for the
storing of combustible or explosive mater
ias.
Tazewell Republican. [volume] (Tazewell, Va.) 1892-1919, 1902-04-03

Beginning Monday, the goth
inst. and continuing until Stock
is sold, shall display on tables,
all the Shoes, Oxfords, Sandals
and Slippers in the house, at
prices never heard of here. Every
pair, without a single reserve,
including ZIEGLER'S finest
Shoes and Slippers. This is an
opportunity to secure the best
at less prices than ever before.
March %
]. d. ALEXANDER.
Tazewell Republican. [volume] (Tazewell, Va.) 1892-1919, 1902-04-03
TOWN AND COUNTY RTNS.

Camn.ck x Black, photographers, OF
Greencastle, Ind, will open their branch
( studio at razewell in short 'ime \. NJ
Back, who has been here for the past Two
seasons, will again have charge Of the
studio and will endeavvr to turn out a
better grade of work than ever
Next Monday the regular april term Of
circuit court for Tazewel county will con-
vene, with Judge Jackson presiding. The
docket for the term is larger than usual.
One of the most interesting cases that will
he passed upon by the court is the writ of
error in the Cease of George and John
Jones.
Mrs. Watt Fugae, nee Miss Maude Me.
CURE, has peen very i'll at Cedar Bluff for
several weeks. Last week her friends
we're very much alarmed about her con-
dition; but at this writing the reports as
to her condition are more favorable, and
her friends have strong assurances of her
recovery.
We learn that Mr.. A. St. Clair has lei out
ali the work on his new business building.
Henry Kincer has the contract for the
stone work. James Kits for the brick work
and Emshwiller & Barnett for the car
penters work. From all we can learn it
will be one of the handsomest business
houses, when completed, in Southwest
Virginia.
On last Tuesday committee of gentle
men representing the various Methodist
churches Of the Liberty Hill circuit came
to town to select a location for the new
parsonage for that circuit. it has been
decided to build the parsonage here and,
a location has about been agreed upon,
but no contracts have yet been made, ex-
.ept for building the house. Mr.. j. T..
Heldreth has secured that contract
We are the only exclusive clothing and
mems and boys furnishing dealers in the
town. We give our entire attention to these
lines and YOU will see the result when you
examine cur stock and prices. Stylish,
GOOD wearing suits of latest patterns, and
hoes at the lowest possible cost. If you
are hard to please we can suit You.
llarman & Bottmore.
Ga yesterday Drs. J. II. Crockett and
Z. T. ST. Clair performed very delicate
and successful operation onSt. Clair Stuart
Tie operation was laparotomy, and the
conditions found when the operation was
performed demonstrated its absolute nee.
pssty. The appeIdx wss remove d a d
construction of an intestine relieved. The
patient rallied promptly from the opera
ton, and his condition is now considered
favorable.
The large safe of Tazewrll National
Bank was placed in position on last Satur-
day. Il was a difficult Job to transport it
from the depot and unload it at the bank
Mr.. Geo. Lewis had the job and executed
it very successfully. The safe weighing
over four tons, was placed on very heavy
wagon and drawn from the station to the
bank by six horses. 1t required more
than half the day TO unload it and place
IT in position at the bank. 1t is very
handsome safe, is supplied with a time
lock and a vault with combination lock.
1t would require great deal Of time and
labor for burglar to crack it.