The Savannah morning news. (Savannah, Ga.) 1900-current, 1902-12-08
UNCLE MING0 ON THE COAL
STRIKE.

While waiting for his dinner to be
brought on, Uncle Mingo stood warm
ing his great horny hands at the
restaurant stove.
DE cole wedder has come at las',"
remarked the waiter: "but it was
mighty lucky for de people dat it hol'
OH so long, De late winter was sholy
a blessin'''
so it was" said Uncle Mingo; its
like. Kunnel Bob Ingersoll use to say
so frequent: De Lord temper de win
to de sho'n lamb"
Who was to blame for dat striker"
asked the waiter: de miners or de
boSses?"
Well" said Uncle Mingo, at depen'
on who you AK. If you ak de miners,
dey blame it on de boss; if you ak de
boss, he 'cuse de miners. De miners
say, 'We'se so sorry for de po' people
all ober de country wot can't git 10
coal, an winter comm on fas': but
faint we-all fault-jump on de boss
Den he bosses say, We can't helm from
cryin' and weepin' edible time we tink
OBJ our sufferin' Teller citizens habin'
to cook DER Christmas dinner widout
no fire; but faint our dom; it's up to
dem dog-gone lazy miners De people
Is like po' Teller wot git pen UP on
de middle OBJ a long narrer bridge by
TWO big wagons wof met cen de mid
way, an don't neider one glib way for
de udder. De Teller cen de middle he
git jam up an trample on, an he hol-
Ter out wot dey is doin'. One driber
say, Very sorry for you, sab. but I
can't make dat fool jackass yonder
glib way De udder one say, You has
my sympathy, sab, but can't helm it
cause dat lop-sided fool hog yonder
won't back outen my way So ,ley
git to peltin an hammerin' at one an
udder an all two dodgin benin de
Teller cen de middle, an him q catch
in all de ticks"
Does you tink," said the waiter,
dat de commissary cote wots now a
workin' will succeed cen settlin' it all
up?"
Dunno" said Uncle Mingo, "but I
has my doubts. Wichebber side dey
settle on de udder side is pretty sho'
to kick. De miners say dey don't git
'nough pay. Wy, dey say, time dey
pay de salary OBJ de walkin' delegate,
an the Supreme SECRETARY an de
High muckety much an pay the 'sess-
ment for the strike fun day don't hab
hardly nough lef' to buy a pianner an
Keep ottermobile an a steam la'nch.
Wen dey gifts troo' DER tale OBJ woe. de
bosses start deir'n. Quite inadivertint.
dey say, an vile nobody wasn't look
in some water had manage to leak
eento de stock an dat make so much
mo- to pay dibidens on Derefo, dey
say, dey can't fode to pay no more
wages, witch dey claim dey is already
payin sufficient enough"
Dat remember me-" said the waiter,
how | see dat vile dey wasn't dom
no work de mines had leak full o. wa
ter too, well as de stock"
SO dey did," said Uncle Mingo; IAN
1t strike me den dat dey ought to
pump out dat water, an let it go for
dlbiden' on de water-stock"
"Ha! hal" laughed the waiter; "Un-
Gle, dat is pretty good! You ought to
write dat UP to de commissary cote;
it'll glib 'em a new idee."
I'm tink about it," said Uncle Mingo
But wot say is dis: Glib de workin'
man a chance, an to de dibbil wild
de trus! Edible ting is a trus, an de
people catches it a-goin' an a-comin
De people ought to do 'em like l do
an glib em a hoo-doo. Wen de meat
trus' put up de price o. meat, stop eat
in meat, an take to taters an tur-
nsps. If de bakers make a trus',
stop eatin' bread an poun'-cake."
But" said the waiter, "wen de
freeze come you got to go to de coal
baron as dey call him, to git coal"
mot me-" said Uncle Mingo, you
don't catch me goin' to no coat-baron
to git no coal. Use goin' to de pine
barren to git some wood; l kin git all
l want, an git 1t cheap"