The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1902-08-13
MRS. DOLBY'S TALKS.
She Gives Mr.. Dolby Going Over
About Various Sinful Things.


office after supper, and upon returning
he found Mrs. Dolby seated on the piaz-
"a with her soectacles on and a grim
look around her mouth. He tender
heartedly brushed a bug away that he
sigh, and after a long look at him over
her glasses Mrs. Dolby said:
''Zadok Dolby, I've got a few words
to say to you, and you know I'm a wo-
man who talks right out when she has
anything to say. You are deacon in
the church, but deacons want talkin' to
now and then as we'll as other folks.
Three or four morllin's ago you woke
up and found hog in the garden. You
jumped for club and ran him four
times about the place, and just as he
went through hole in the fence you
brought him a Whack and said some
thin to yourself. What it was I dun
no, but that hoa turned around and
looked at you in amazement- and I
heard a boy laugh out and clap his
hands, Zadok, I've got my suspicious
I've got my suspicious that after bein'
a Twin example for forty years you
are gettin' tired of your job and want
to become wicked and go to boss races
and county conventions
Mr.. Dolby hitched about uneasily and
pulled at the leaves of the Virginia
creeper running up beside him, but did
not defend himself. He was allowed to
have three minutes to do it in, and then
Mrs. Dolby set her foot to trotting and
went on:
"One afternoon last week you was
saunterin' about the back yard with
your hands behind you and contented
look on your face. 1 was lookin' at
you and thinkin' what a good man you
was when you stepped on a blade of d
hoe and the handle flew up and fetched
you whack on the head. You rubbed
the spot, gave one look around, and
then you kicked in the head of the old
vinegar barrel and said som ethin' as
many as five times over. 1 couldn't
catch the words. but my blood run cold
for the next hour. Ever since then I've
been askin' myself if I'm livin' with a
man who may begin to chaw terbackeT
and bet on elections any mornin' in the
year. Only last night I dreamed you
had been churched for swearin' and
that we was dividin' up the things and
l was coin' home.''
Mr.. Dolby started to sigh, but saw
two grasshoppers engaged in deodly
combat on the ground and checked it
Nto watch the struggle. He was men
tally putting up a PUNK that the Geek
eyed hopper would win over the old
baldhead when Mrs. Dolby put on
more severe look and continued:
I'm no hand to bring up things.
Zadok, as you know but I'm a truth
full person and don't beat about the
bush. You had never been to a circus
when we got married, and you have
never been to one since. You a1lus said
that Satan and the circus was twin
brothers. l know they have been post
in up bills for a circus that's comm to
town in two weeks, but Ive-been care
full not to look at em. I've felt it my
duty as your wife to turn my head
away when passed the pictur's, and if
there had been any feelin' that I'd like
to see the elephant I've come home
and washed my mouth out with pep
per sass. Yes, I've done all this, "a
f1<aly hut horrv fcrs
three days ago that Mrs. Graham saw
you standin in front of a lot of circus
pictur's, and you was so wrapped up in
'em that you didn't hear her speak to
you. She said she'd bet you'd sneak
of to the performance at night if you
wasn't afraid everybody would see
you. She didn't tell it to be mean, but
she thought it was her duty. When
a deacon begins to go down hill his
wife had better look out. He's liable
to murder her any day. Zadok, if Satan
has got hold of you I want to know it.
l want to help you to wrassle with
him. Have you a feelin' that you'd
like to go to the circus?''
The grasshopper fight was ended by
this time. with cockeye as victor and
Mr.. Dolby had been asked a straight
question. He didn't answer, however.
There was a wistful look on his face.
and the memory of those pictures rose
up before him, but he sighed softly and
wondered if the hen that was trying to
crowd under the gate would accomplish
the feat
And What did my brother Moses
have to tell me three or four days
ago?" asked Mrs. Dolby as a touch of
pathos came to her tone. Moses is no
hand to tell things When his COW died
two years ago. heonever said a word
about it for weeks. He didn't tell this
to me to make trouble between us, but
he thought 1 ought to be ready if
calamity was comm. He was gOin'
past the baseball grounds one day last
week, and there was a game on. I
don't say that baseball is as sinful as
boss racin', but I don't know. and you
have allus said SO yourself. that it's
one of the paths that lead down to per-
dition. The players yell and whoop and
swear and drink beer. and sometimes
the game ends in fight Moses didn't
think of goin' in especially as the price
was two shillins admittance and he
was turnin' away from temptation when
he saw you. You was standin' up to the
fence and loolxin' through knot hole,
and be called your name seven times
without your hearin' him.
Moses almost cried when he told me
of it. He said the next thing would be
a boss race unless you got hold of your
sell, and the next after that would be
a grand crash You can't so on this
way, Zadok-you can't do it. amt
sayln' you've cone to any great harm
yet, though I notice you pick cut the
shortest chapters in the Bible for fam
lily trayers. Do you realize that Satan
is q fter you?'
The heu lad got under the gate ana
gore. but Mr.. Dolby had becorsle inter-
ested in two hogs in the street Both
wanted the same mudhole for a bed
and a fight was imninent to see which
Should have possession. Mr.. Do1by's
sy mpathies were with the spotted hog,
AND he took no heed of the woman be-
kind linn. She didn't seem to exp, ca
HIN, C. bLi after a couple of minutes
feslir.yly observed:
There's one thing more, Zadok, and
I'm bound to tell you of it. One even
in last week when you was mill<in'
the COW and 7 was in the barn loolin
for eggs I heard somethin' go 'spat,'
and ! looked out to find you in a heap
on the ground. The COW had kicked
you over. You got up and grabbed a
piece of fence rail. and you lam basted