The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-08-17
TALES OF HUMAN NATURE
The Eng1ishman Who Capped All
Stories Save One.
CNew York Tribune.)

1.-The Lord save me from an English
man who has done things, or says he
has" said a western man at the Wal
dorf- Astoria recently. Such a one
will spoil any party, and throw gloom
on any gathering he happens to be
in. An Englishman of this type was
once visitor in my town, and at the
club he becs me an unmitigated NUS
ance No matter what story was told,
the Britisher invariably went Nhe mar
rator one better For example, one
man told of a big faro game he had
seen at Cheyenne in those never-to-
be-forgotten DAYS when cattle sold at
SO each. and everyone in the cattle
country simply reeked with wealth. lt
WAS a good story, but as soon as IL
was finished the Englishman rang in
one of an experience he had had at
Monte Carlo that made the Cheyenne
tale seem like a bottle of flat cham
payne.
Then an ex-army officer told of
company of infantry at Gettysburg
that had been sent TO capture a GER
tain hill. They didn't secure II, but
10 per cent of the company lay oeao
or wounded on that bloody hillside be-
fore the boys in blue could be driven
back.
The Englishman capped that with
an experience of his in India Out of
a company of seventy-six Sikhs that
he commanded only two esca ped-hinn-
self and another-the other shot so full
of holes that he looked like nutmeg
crater
when the refreshments, made nee
essary by this last anecdote, had been
frnbibed, another man so forgot him
self As 10 relate an experience he had
had while hunting bars. The Eng
! lishrnan chimed in at once with a
legend of a bear hunt of his own He
hsd only six shots in his maya zine
rifle. and was attacked by four adult
I and two cub bears. After an exhibit
I ton OF fancy shooting that must nave
made the performances Of Wild BIZ
or Billy the Kid look amateur1sh, the
/ last bear fell. shot through the heart.
I only six feet from where the doughty
/ Engiishman stood
The silence that followed the rela-
I ton of this Munchausen positively hurt
I but when il was at length broken the
fate that Englisbman had so long
/ been tempting was upon him
| That experience. said the soft
/ voice of q six-foot mining man, who
! had been silent. reminds me Of SIM
J liar one ( Tllyself once had l was ait
er antelope and had chased par OF
/ them all the afternoon They finally
came TO a canyon and made for it.
> Just as they got to its entrance shot
] twice At them. missing both times
! didn't Gre again, for the reason that
those two shots were all that L had
I in my maj zine rife Nothing daunt
| ed. I spurred my weary mount forward
and soon found myself within the
shs dcys. Of the canyon. which rose
precipItously With IT, idea of rest
/ ing my horse. Jismounted- and that
| wretched bToncho took prompt advant-
/ age of my kindness by jerking the
/ reins from my hand and making a
/ bolt of IL Looking around for the
! eause. saw a grizzly at least nine feet
| high rushing toward M with oper
mouth. ! can tel YOU : legged 1t VI
/ that canyon. and a busy brain ac-
| cornps MED me ] couldn't shoot the
| grizzly. for my last shot had beer
fired at the antelope Just then rocs
| came into view, and, utterly spent
| east myself upon it
Here the miner came TO full stop
and the deeply interested EDglishmar
leaned breatfiessly forward, 'Whai
he 1ueried. what did the bear do, my
/ dear fellow Why, returned the 9th
/ er. without batting an eyelash, he ats
me up. Of course
There is in q southern city 4 coloreS