Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1902-06-24
THE GRaDI,aTE.

THE GRADUATE.
THIS 70 the time of year when the
pale, yonng graduate steps out upon
the roetrum and points dramatically
down the long vista of the years with
one hand, and hurls defiance and one
OF his cuffs with the other. 1t is the
time of year when the hungry vale
dictorian, with forehead three sizes
too large for his face, comes out from
behind bunch of rose geraniums and
hurries over the general plan OF Gre
alton.
In June the scared and sweating
high school graduate stands out on
the platform and talks to the nations
yet unborn, and in June, too the real
and genuine graduate, the collegiate,
steps out on the stage and sheds
enough wisdom and eight-inch words
70 hold the nation together little
while longer.
Last year we attended graduating
bee, which resulted as follows: Dec
laration Of independence sneered at
4 times; United States senate
publicly reprimanded 1S times;
President of United States scold-
ed 6 times; rulers of other ma
tions scolded 81 times; number of
plans suggeste ed for ruling the world
during future ages, Z; Shakespeare
misquotcd 50 times; constitution of
the United States ripped up the back
times; George Washington's farewell
address injured in the same place, 4
times. The valedictorian wac pallid
young man, who stepped out from
behind celluloid palm and worked off
a few eaucy remarks&upon the popu-
lar theme: "Vestigia Nulla RestroY-
sum"
Professors, Classmates, Friends"
said he, making @ low, courtly bow,
during which his necktie slid to the
top of his collar. '"Vestigia Nulla Res
trorsum,' take no steps backward. AS
far back as time goes, it has been the
} general policy to take no steps back
, ward. excepting in cases where it was
. unavoidable, but, looking down
through the thin mist of the coming
years. we are not quite SO sure that
'Vestigia Nulla Restrorsum' will be as
stylish as It has been. Gazing intent
ly out through the long vista of the
ages yet to be, we see the world
scratching its headan apparently try
ing to decide whether TO step back
ward or forward 1t has gone on and
on, from time to time, inventing new
style Of bed slat or hair restorative one
day and new style of profanity the
} next.
"The world ever since it has been old
enough to walk. has kept up eontin-
nal march upward and onward. 1t
has never faltered or hesitated or sat
down. but has kept steadfastly on with
!, the patient industry and the silent ten
acity of fall candidate. But to-day
! as we stand looking out some 40 or sc
miles into the future, painful sense
: of alarm comes stealing over us that
feels a good deal like the July hives
We see the world stop and begin tc
look about for place to sit down and
take the stone out of its shoes. Prog
Y ress acts like it had the rheumatism
The inventor has ceased to invent, The
) scientist has gone to work in ths
laundry. and the north pole remain.
> unbiased.
,, perhaps we are wrong. Perhaps
) we cannot see quite as far into the
future with the naked eye as we thinl
9 we can; perhaps our imagination ha!
slipped its halter. perhaps we ate tor
9 much forsupper. But. be that as it may
!, whether the world shah continue tt
h march onward until people get to do
8 ing their thinking by machinery
v or whether the world shall cease it,
3. progress entirely. let us individual,
= take no steps backward. Let us eacl
Il hurry steadily and persistently for
!, ward as though one of our creditors
9 was Just behind us.
!, "And now. dear classmates, WE
Q must say good-by. For four long years
!. we have been looking forward to thi.
day when we should stand up here
Nth pride and PRECIPITATION and re
: celVe Our diplomas. Here our path
9 fork. Soon we thall be ierked apart
n but. as the poet has beautifully said
d Our future is before us, but our ma 8
= = is behind We cannot tell Just wher,
y we shall bring up. We do not know
:. whether we shnll get into politics o
Q the penttentiary. or both. Some O
g g us may get to be hotel clerks, and stan,
l. up behind q large 3G-candle-powe
l. !. shirt stud and yell front with the ac
j. cent on the first syllable, and some o
o US may only get to be president of tn
h United States. But. no matter VIVA
we may become, whether we turn on
" to be a lawyer or blacksmith, snak
l. charmer or matrimonial agent
a whether we are sent to the legislator
d to make speeches or scrub the floor. lie
II IL us always bear in mind that what
h mansews that shallhe also rip. Humps
20 bus. chumpibus, est busibus que; spir
:. titus frumenti whoopibus sc. Teacher
~ and classmates and friends all. good-by
D IN hoe signo hiccup cum pubica pie.
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