Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1902-10-04
JOBSON ORDERS COAL


at says here in the paper" she remarked
to Mr. Jobson, that the miners averaged
$50 day and that that's more than twice
work in the old country-they're all for
eigners. 1t seems. It's a wonder they
wouldn't stop striking They didn't gain
much the last time they struck. did they?"
Mr.. Jobson regarded Mrs. Jobson with
stern and swelling disapproval over the top
of his newspaper.
That's just like woman he said.
Il never saw a woman yet that didn't
swallow whole everything that she saw In
newspaper. And 1 never saw one yet,
either, that had as much common consider
alton and human pity in her makeup as a
wolf of the desert. The"
But" put in Mrs. Jobson, isn't $3.50
a day pretty good pay. for a workingman
that just digs with pick and shovel?'
Yes, madam" oracularly replied Mr.
Jobson. 80 day would be good enough
pay for 'em If they got it. But they don't
get it, or anything like It. I don't happen
to remember the exact figures at the mo-
ment, but I don't believe that they get
more than a third of $3.50 a day. What
you need is little Of the milk of human
Kindness. Mrs. Jobson. It's all right for
you to sit here and talk. when you have
never anything to do but to read deleterious
literature and take in bargain sales but
II you were the struggling. shaving wife of
ohC VI lHoSe uIlIOI tuIldle IcIlHSylNdHld
miners you'd be singing a different song.
You"
But interrupted Mrs. Jobson again, 'tf
they really receive more than twice as
country as they got in the old country
where they came from, why don't"
Now, You want to stop applying oppro-
brious epithets to such of these grueled
miners as happen to be foreigners, broke
in Mr.. Jobson, crushingly. "You wouldn't
have to go back many generations before
you'd meet up with the foreign strain in
all of us. when it comes to that and wheth-
thing to do with the matter. They're hui
man beings. aren't they? I tell you what.
Mrs. Jobson. you only reveal what cruel
and totally unsympathetic nature you pos
sess when you take the part of the bloated
capitalists and trust manipulators against
these brutally-treated men of the mines.
I guess If you had to lie your stomach
for about eighteen hours day, groveling
around in the wet mines and working with
pick, for a few miserable pennies day,
you'd come pretty near being anarchist.
m surprised at you. I hate to see a wo-
man so callous as you are in these mat
fortunates to win their strike, and to win
with both feet. I'm thankful to say that
I've. got little bit Of heart left in me
YETI
We'll" meekly said Mrs. Jobson, sit says
here in the paper that the strike Is liable to
last for a number of months, and that the
price of coal is going up all the time. 1t
says that by the time the cool weather
comes around coal is likely to cost SIS or
even $50 tom
There you go again about what it says
in the newspaper" said Mr.. Jobson, acrid-
ly. What the dickens does the newspaper
know about it any more than anybody else,
I'd like to know? The newspapers are al
ways trying to spring these bogies on folks.
But. when it comes to that, even If it's fore
cast Is correct, and coal does go to $50
Ton who careS2 Those miners fyhttDp
for a great principle, madam and, far as
I am concerned, 1 don't care a nckels
worth of figs If coal goes to $50 ton. I'd
be more than willing to pay the price to see
the miners batter down the strongholds of a
relentless monopoly. That's the kind Of
citizen 1 am. A few miserable. skinny dol
lars are nothing to me when set alongside
the maintenance of principle affecting the
comfort and happiness of hundreds of thou
sands Of sorely tried men, women and chill
dren-not much! And I'd recommend you
to fight against this tendency on your part
to become hardened to the sorrows of your
kind. Mrs Jobson. It's mighty unbecoming,
L can tell you, to see woman plunged in
such pure selishness as you exhibit in ham,
mering these poor men,
Thus effectually squeched Mrs. Jobson
was glad to abandon the subject but she
had an idea or so of her own as to the
changed state of mind Mr.. Jobson would
display as to the coal strike when the time
arrived for him to dicker for the first con-
sgnment of furnace coal. So when at the
breakfast table the other morning Mr.. job
son told her in an offhand way that he in
tended to drop by the coal mans on his
way home from the Office and order five
tons of coal for the furnace she was pre-
pared for a little seance with Mr.. Jobson on
his arrival home that afternoon, and her
expectations were fully realized
Mr.. JobSOn stormed into the vestibule, his
face as red as the comb of a turkey cock,
and the veins of his forehead sticking out
alarmingly. He capped his new derby on
to the sitting room table with ferocious
force and began to stride up and down the
room like tiger
Did you order the coal?" inquired Mrs
Jobson. softly. She knew what was coming,
and she wanted to have it over with as soon
as possible.
Did 1 wh-a-at!" bawled Mr.. Jobson at
the top Of his lungs. What do you think
1 am, anyhow; the Shah of Persia or the
Nizam of Hyderabad? Order the coal?
Madam, are you aware of what that in
fernal scoundrel. that constituencies pirate
OF coal man, said to me when I told him
that I wanted five tons Of furnace coal?"
Well" said Mrs. Jobson. 1 don't know,
unless he
NO." shouted Mr. Jobson," and you
couldn't guess in a hundred million years,
either. The lubberly ruffian-and after I've
been buying coal from him for nearly fif-
teen years, too-simply grinned right in my
teeth and told me that if he stretched a
point he might be able to let me have as
much half a ton for $10-said that he
was asking some Of hts well-to- do custom
ers as high as So ton, selling 1t to 'em by
the half ton, but that, as had been one Of
his customers for so long he would make
the terms he had stated for me-
well" said Mrs. Jobson, 1.-The strike, you
know"
'Strike! howled Mr.. Jobson. Madam
have you got the temerity to stand there
before me and call the criminal conspiracy
against the peace and prosperity of the ma
ton on the part of crew of Hungarian
hoodlums. ramping Roumantan roustabouts,
brutal, plackguardly Bulgartans-this pack
Of numbering anarchists-are you suff-
GENTLY idiotic to try to tell me that this
fendish plot against the progress of the
United States Is so innocuous and mild a
thing as a strike? Why, it's revolution and
1t ought to be put down withthe bayonet and
ball cartridges and Calling guns
But" interposed Mrs. Jobson when we
were talking about it couple of months
ago didn't you say that you felt sorry for
the miners, and that they"
''Who-me say anything like that?"
shrieked Mr.. Jobson. dancing around on the
CRATE rug and Juggling at his back hair.
Me give expression to sympathetic re-
marks about parcel of government wreck
ers, the offscourings Of Europe, who have
come over here with the idea that they
ought to be furnished with automobiles and
hatfuls Of diamonds and dry goods boxes
stuffed with money for putting in a few
nF 10Th al in he