The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1902-07-13

man ter milk her an though this worked
all right when OF Niger Nose was alive
sence he petered out the time we've had
has nigh drove us ter drink.
I Not aknowin' the cows pecoollar and
original antiperthy "a members Of her own
sex we struck a decker with Verbum Sapp's
mother-in-law ter tend ter tn niRin' and
thought all was serene, fer we'd back
Verbs mother-in-law 10 manage anything
when she started fer the tree into the
pasture where the COW chews her cud and
we stood In the door Of the shack and
watched her walk iantily down the path
and stl'adde over the fence with the lard
can that we use fer n milk pail under
one arm and the stool under the other,
Ter cut n long story short when she came
back a-past where we stood her skirts was
bifurcated, she had one foot through the
bottom Of the lard can and she had dropped
her pipe; and she was cnssin to beat the
band and hlttin' tho ground only often
enough to give her steerage way.
We have no desire 10 enlarge on what
Verbs mother-in-law said TO US when. Verb
had pulled her out from under the house
and got her clothed decent, nor where she
said we could put the cow; whatever she
said was said In the heat Of anger, and
she beln' a female critter and q perfect
lady, we have as good as forgotten all
about II. and we want 20 say in passing
that our tobacco box Is still free 10 her,
and she is still at liberty 10 make herself
she feels like. while her poetlcal contribu
tons win. as Of yore, be thankfully re-
celNcd ana given 4 position next 10 pure
booze advertisements.
when we had soothed Verbs mother in
Law we borrowed an outdt OF Verbs wlfe's
duds Verbs wife having gone 10 a land
that Is hotter than this lour readers remem-
her that she skcdaddled 10 Arizona with n
Teller come Sundays a year. and putin
them on and GOVERN our head with sun
bonnet we started for the pasture ter de
ceive thar COW and give her the time OF
her life; we carried an old pickax handle.
holdin' It concealed in our skirts; and we
was so full Of laugh that orr sides shook
as we thought how we was goin' 10 land
onto the Stats Of that bovine peryert. She
seen us acomin and as she got nigh rs
and we started to lamm loose with our
piece OF furniture the dadgasted thing
Fetched IN our skirts and tripped Va plum
up we was Just a-scramblin' 10 our feet
when that dadgasted COW. got 70 work on
II she didn't horn and bunt us half across
the lot with our nose In the dirt before We
could git our feet under us and make fer
the tree Finally. however. we reached
and skun up II more dead than alive and
sot there four mortal hours with that hell.
fred critter PAWN up the dirt and coaxin'
ef us 70 come down Finally we We rem tl
which she permitted MS to descend and
depart In peace. and, we was about 10 re
mark. In pieces.
How we finally got reyenged is another
story, and we have used up more space
with unimportant details now than we IN
tended doing when we started out: what
we Intended doing was 10 prepare our
readers for our absence next week, when
we will be at the galveston convention.
we havin' been retained by Kentucky
whisky house TO assist In launching a new
brand Of bulge on the market. Another
Teller win do the spiel whilst we occupy
all the different kinds Of ecstasy this new
brand Of bulge will send man into with
our earnin's on this side line ys hope to