West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1902-08-28
THE RURAL PosTMAN.
He Hands Out Chunks Of Wisdom Along
His Nail Route
And Pours OIL on Troubled Waters as
He Jogs Aleng.


desperate. she replied As the tears came te
het eyes
''Shoo! Don't you do IT,"
"bu, will. II don't hang myself. III
run away with the 6rs, tin peddlat who'll
take me. Which do you think is the easies,
death. hanging or drowning ."
'Nei,her Of 'em arc half as easy as ehok.
ing yourself with green tomato. Now
Mary out with il. What's your trouble ? -
'Jim Henderson don't come to see me
any more"
"U@l jim has been coming for abou, a
year 2"
ayes"
Sand /, was an engagement, ?"
| "Aim,st."
"And all of a sudden he stops coming
here and goes over to Joe Johnson's to see
his girl Fanny"
"Y.yes," said Mary as she fell TO sob.
bing
"Hold on girl. Let's see II there is any
thing worth crying about I've known Jim
Henderson for three years and all he's done
IN that time was to trade off blind horse
aud sell half dozen washing machines.
Jim couldn't raise sac In cash to save his
neck II he takes wife she's GO, to sup.
por, him. Did you ever figure on ihisp"
"No."
''Jim is soft, slick talker. He's talked
to you about moonlight. water falls, azure
skies. babbiing brooks and all that hash L
her"
"Yes Abe he has and that's wha, 90, me
to loving him."
al thought, so. You want 10 remember
however that dozen eggs go further than
twenty azure skies aud that one pound of
pork beats dozen waterfalls. You are
chunk of girl with good appetite aud the
babble of a babbling brook don't sooihe q
wife to sleep. Love is all right my dear bu,
there must he pork and ,aiefs behind H.
Where's Jim going To get emp"
al never though, of that, she says as
she wipes the tears away.
''Jim talked Of love and you listened hui
II you had asked him To spell the word he
couldn't have done IL. lie spells hog with
two g's, rooster with one a., and he doesn't
try to spell horse at all. You didn', know
this did you '''
.,N-o"
81 thought not. One OF his babbinv
brooks would drown him before he could h,
upon the proper way to spell pork knoe
the family. Ills father is bowlegged, his
mother squnt eyed and his sister has hare
lip. Jim himself is getting baldheaded and
has ,witch 10 his right leg. Lordy girl
bu, how could you he so blind1 You've had
the escape Of your life and you ought 10 be
singing songs Of ihankfulness. JUS, shut
your eyes aud bring picture of Jim before
you and tell ne IL be hasn't GO, the look of
| a hyena on wheels"
"Abe III guess I've heen silly girl
says Mary as she cries and laughs by turns.
"Of course you have. All girls are silly
somestimes. A man who don't know whether
the world turns round SIX or sixteen times
day has talked azure skies and babbIing
brooks to you and you have fallen in love
with him. fie on you gIrI You ought TO
be glad he's taken himself off.
"And am. hope never TO see him
again. Abe I've been goose but ihere'll
be no more Of il, I'll 60 in and go TO churn-
ing and singing and before nigh, TIL try 10
forget all about Jim Henderson. You are
dear, sweet man and II you'll hold down
here III"
"And here's one for you" says +, and as
she ran for the house with both cheeks
blushing like roses drove OF.
There was no one at The gate as drove
up 10 the Widow Danyers but one Of her
daughters beckoned me from the front door.
II was Sue and found Kate aud Sarah IN.
SIDE with the mother. I, was easy to see
that all Of them had been crying and scold-
ing
"Abe II is jus, this way" began The wild.
ow after had had glass Of milk and a
piece Of pie. "Mr. Burbanks has asked me
to marry him. You know him and you
know he's good man. He's been a wild.
dover this long time but he's decided to ge,
married again"
''Bui ma is most sixiy-eigh, years old''
exclaimed Sue.
"And he's most six,y.hve" adds Kate.
"And they are both ready for the grave
says Sarsh.
"Bui he don't want TO marry no frivolous
girl ard ] don't went to marry no siIiy
young man." says the widow. 'sUncle lake
will be good husband 10 me and good
father to these girls"
"fIe1l never be no father to met
'Vor mew
''Nor mer'
''You see how i, is Abe and what shall
dor Ny gids don't want to see me happy.
Uncle Jake aud have loved each other foi
years past and now"
"You ought to be ashamed Of itl"
80 you had"
"Did eyeri"
"Girls." says IS I takes minute Z,
think things over, Glove Is love. II come
TO the youth sitting on the fence and to tn
old man on ciuicbes. You can't dodge IL
Uncle Jake Burbanks is in love and you
mother IS In love and"
"And so are We" ehofused the three
girls.
"Kate can you yet marsied7"
''Yes sir. within = week -
"And Suep"
"W,hin three days
"And Sarah7"
Tomorrow.
Then &c, up and do 1t. You are all ol'