Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1902-06-28
FACTS AND FANCIES.


Goodness. how that railroad stock
does fluctuate.' Yes. its Z wise rail-
road stock that knows its own par
Philadelphia Press.
dis world would go along mighty
easy" said Uncle Eben. ii every man
could be as smart at a. as h. thought
he was ut %. "-Washington star
Aerial avigation.-Lady-W What is
your chief lookout while sailing in the
, sky? osDumont-LookiHg for a
soft spot to fall on,-Brooklyn Eagle.
The carpenter goes to the barbers to
have his hair shingled, and the BARRIERS
| hoy goes to the carpenter for Shayings
Funny, isn't it?'-Boston Transcript.
"'Scurious thing" said Tanks. Il
paradox, believe they cali il" What's
that?" when a fellow gets fat for
ward it makes him lean backward.''-
indianapolis News.
Mrs. Hatterson-You won't mean TO
say that you have no theories about the
education of children.
Mrs. Catterson-N9: have ~ many
Paw" said little Willy, is they any
such thing as cradle OF IA deep?''
| Certainly. son." replied paw. There's
got to be something TO stop Jhe squalls
at seat Baltimore News.
A Good Smack.-Ya tts-I haven't de
| cided yet what to call my new cathoat.
whats the idea%' ITS nothing but
a smack. philadelphia Press.
Young wrounder is booking very
Sow"
40 ~ ''o R S9'S Press.
They We're ont driving. and she said:
! Would you ever let your love grow
cold. Charle?' And he answered. absent
mlndedIy: NO, love. Just tell me whom
| you are growing cold. and I'll put the
blanket around yOu."-Yonders States
man.
She-ATrs. Boreton called today. and I
thought she'd never go.
He-But you are so. amiabe sup
pose YOU never gave ner the slightest
mint that YOU wanted her 10 90
She-Indeed. | did not If I had she'd
be here now.-Brooklyn Life.
Appalled.-Doctor-I am slightly in
doubt as to whether yours is constitu-
tonal disease or not. Patient-For
! heavens sake, doctor, have I got to go
| TO the expense of appealing TO the United
States supreme court to find out whether
it is or not?-Richmond Dispatch
Days and Nights.-'I suppose you have
! read The Last Days of POmpeji said
the literary girl. NO" answered the girl
who isn't literary. but is willing 70 try, i
haven't read The Last Days Of Pompeii'
at least not all of them, but | have
read most of the Arabian Nights ~-
Washington Star.
MabeI-In old-fashioned no7elS. the
hero and heroine married in The last
chapter and lived happily oyer after
ward.
Marion-They write more naturally
nowadays. The hero and heroine marry in
the first chapter and live uIt,a )piiy aft
erward.-Town Topics.
Fridge-What's all this - about
Stimson having row wi. Taphins?
| They actually came TO blows. I believe.
and | hear that Stimson was vcrv St
verely injured. He isn't in danger.
hope? Bridge-No, he's not in ans dan
ger. unless he's fool enough 70 tell Jen-
| hlllS ne an ldlot agaln.-GlaSg0F Even
ing Times.
That game don't go down angrily
exclaimed the zebra as the elephant
called for his money. You don't get
the coin. see?'
Saratoga trunk shrieked the excited
elephant. Il don't. How DO you make
| that|
Cause the jockey that rode the ostrich
| won on a fowl"
Whereupon something happened -Bal-
timore News
a Good Prophet assidy-Kearnsy
seems 10 be dom we'll in mis- prisE-
lob.
Ca>ey-Ah: but he'll not lasht long in
Cassidy-He seems dacint and sober
| now.
Casey-Aye. but he'll not lasht a
month. Owe said SO liver since he 20
| the job two years ago. an OTll bt. OHM
| rjght.-Philadelphi Press.