The St. Louis Republic. [volume] (St. Louis, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1902-03-23
...1i.4is

ere. And this country calls itself the Dsrh
must prosper" Harry: Yes. but isn't IN
dCstry n pretty heavy price to pay even
for prosperity Boston Transcript.
He Was Warned.
Miss Palisade: Il was very much sur
prised. Mr.. Cleverton. that you wers not at
church this morning to hear me sing the
Christmas solo. Didn't your friend Dash
away tell you about IT beforehand"
Cleverton: Yes. he was good enough to"
Harlem Life.
well. sir" said the Chicasoan, proudly.
what do you think Of our city,"
It's great" replied the crusty tourist.
In fact. I believe the greatest Ill that flesh
is heir TO is Chicago. m."-Philadelphia
Press.
Would Carry 1t Herself.
An unsoph,sticated old woman asked .
druggist the other day if he had any soap.
Yes. ma'am." he replied. DO you want
1t scented or unscentedT'
Well" she replied. '.bein' its so small.
I guess I'll take it along with me."-New
orleans Times-Democrat.
Need Not Delay.
My darling" he exclaimed. II would 90
to the end Of the earth for YOU" There
was a slight pause while the orchestra
played tremulous raGtime.
Suppose" she said. you begin your
travels now."-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
4 Lucky Fellow.
Choliy: Been shooting for a week. old
chap. Had great good luck"
Algy: What did you bring back
ChoiIy proudly: The dogs"
Mrs. HoyIe: How did your husband get
over his Illness so quickiyT"
Mrs. Doyle: Il threatened to send foP
mother to take care Of hIm-"-Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
Most Desirable.-.Tt would be helpfu, TO
you.' said the prison visitor. III you could
take some motto. and try to live up to It"
That's right replied the convict I'D
like to select. for instance. We are mere
to-day and gone tomorrow. "-Philadeiphia
Press.
"It Is too bad. Charlie. that I did not ind
your mamma at home. Will you please
call muse. so that I can have q mes9aEe
for hep Charlie: We'll. yes-but I'd
rather not leave you all alone" "Oh, how
kind. but that doesn't matter" Charlie:
No 1 mean. all alone with that cake over
there."-Brooklyn Life.
Mistress: why. Jane. what did you use
in making this sponge cake?" jane" Wei.
mum, 1 couldn't ind any sponges In the
pantry. so 1 took that big one from the
bathroom-"-Chicago Daily News.
In New York.-"They'vs been married
nearly n year. and they haven't begun 20
They live in a HARLEM nat. whore there
isn't room for doubt. '-Philadelphia Even
ing Bulletin
E~,DI.i.ea.
Mamma: willie! What's the baby e.y.
ing for"
While: "oh, he's unsrateful: that's What
he is"
Mamma: "Ungrateful?"
Willie: "Yes'm. I jest showed him how
to est his cake and he don't appreciate
it."-Philadelphia Press.
An Impossible Person.
Mrs. Queery: isn't she a member Of
Mrs. Gadabout: Not any more. We had
to get rid OF her. or she would have dis
organized US"
Mrs. Queery: Y don't AyT'
Mrs. Gadabout: Yes. At one Of our ses.
sions We were discussing the servant Eirl
question. and she said the best way to solve
the problem was for all of us to stay home
and do our own work.-Philadelphia Press
That Wa. Eno.xh.
He apparently got in with some very
people in Paris. I don't understand It,"
why notg"
We'll. in the first place he couldn't speak
French"
mo. but his money could.'-Philadelphia
Press.
Unanlm0Us. Il
We like to see the Right succeed,
No matter what betide.
The reason is that all Of ~
Are always On that side.
Philadelphia Press. :
~
A Mere b
Ascum: why. he's quite an snthuiastfN
golfer. I understand"
Hazard: Not at all. I've known hin
frequently to allow his business engage
ments to interfere with him."-Philadelphii