Connecticut western news., 1902-08-07

| and hardships of ocean travel that she | could not be tempted to return east by | the sea. So she kept postponing her | visit till the transcontinental railroad | should be built. By that time, how | ever, the aged couple had lost their | property and could not afford the ex- | pense of journey home by rail. Final | ly the old lady became sick, and the at | tending physician informed her that J her time was come to go hence without 1 delay. The preacher visited her and | administered to her what consolation | he could. When he was about to de part he said, My sister, Is there any
 thing else I can do for youT She re-
 piled, My brother, I don't know how
 much influence you have with the
 Lord. but I wish you would pray that
 may be permitted to visit two weeks in | Pike county as go to 'ssaven.
 | Tnere was goou G II or laughter 1 about the board by reason of the hu- | nor of Brother Meloan's story, but
 there was also many moist eye by
 reason of its pathos.
 In these Stories I once related
 some of the eccentric utterances of
 Ion. William O. Gray, probate judge | of Pike county. Here are a couple more:
 Colonel Luke Emerson's Recovery.
 When Colonel Luke NJ. Emerson, the
 greatest importer of Spanish jacks
 and not at all unfamiliar with the oth-
 CT jacks-was lying at deaths door, he
 declared that if he recovered he pro.
 posed to lead a new and better life.
 As Luke. to put 1t mildly. had never
 been celebrated for his piety his prom
 ise of reformation was debated in con-
 nection with his prospects of getting
 we'll Senator Ball told Judge Gray | of Luke's resolution to reform and
 asked his honor what he thought of
 his getting we'll Hell get we'll, dead
 sure, sir. God always meets a man half way. sir" answered Judge Gray
 cheerily, and Luke did get well. Wheth- | CT he Is working much at leading a
 new and better life this deponent say | eth not.
 New Marriage Ceremony.
 | In his official capacity Judge Gray is
 sometimes called upon to perform the
 marriage ceremony. In his first effort | in that line he came near breaking up
 the meeting by introducing a startling innovation into the formula In such cases made and provided. From force of habit, suppose, he ordered the as-
 tonished couple to hold up their hands instead of joining hands. This caused 1 Q general litter among the spectators,
 but when he said, You do solemnly | swear to do thus and soT' instead of | Do you pronnsef' etc, all the crowd
 exploded with laughter except the high contracting parties," who stood dumb as oysters.
 | I have grave doubts as to whether
 his honor made this amusing change
 accidentally or on purpose. He may
 have thought, in view of the epidemic of divorces, that it would strengthen
 the ties if he swore them to stay to- | gether, and I suggest to the next legis-
 lature that 1t might promote domestic peace and harmony If they would re- q gre brides and bridegrooms to swear ] to their vows of affection.
 Governor Balls Tongue.
 Most people have heard of the yolu- ble female '.who talks as though her | tongue were loose at both ends and
 tied in the middle" That would ap-
 pear to mean that the physical confor-
 nation of the tongue has something to l do with the rate and readiness of
 speaking. ..e Everybody out west knows or knows | of ex-Lieutenant Governor David A. ! Ball, once candidate for governor of
 Missouri. He Is one of the finest stumpers in the state and one of the | glibbest takers ever heard. He comes
 as near being really extemporaneous speaker as ever lived. 1 have heard
 him make hundreds of speeches in the court and out. He never wrote a speech
 in his life. I have tried to get him to do so. but he won't. I have marveled at his facility. After more than twenty years of intimacy with him I think I have discovered the secret of his won- .derful fiuency.
 When boy, he tried the unusual and I disastrous experiment of driving mule | to water by holding him by the tail.
 The astounded hybrid resented this an
 moving familiarity with his caudal ap-
 pendage by kicking the embryo gov ernor on the jaw, thereby closing his
 mouth suddenly, causing him to bite
 his tongue nearly In twain. The end hung on to the main part by a mere
 thread. Surgeons were scarce in those days, so Captain Ball, the governors
 father, performed an operation himself | on his son. It was rather rough, but emincntly successful. He used neither
 anmsthctics nor antiseptics. He had
 no case of glittering and highly pol
 ished instruments. He simply placed the boy on his back, put one knee on
 his breast, with an ordinary pair of 1 pinchers pulled his tongue out, took ] several stitches in 1t with a common
 sewing needle, rubbed some salve on the wound and turned him loose to get
 we'll. He did get we'll, but his tongue
 has a deep scar or cut clear across 1t
 near the middle to this day. Perhaps
 this indentation produces an unusual fiexibility of tongue which gives the governor his extraordinary facility In
 addressing his fellow citizens.
 Cotonei Anoerson's Celebration. There have been few men in Missou-
 Il more royalty endowed with gifts,
 both mental and physical, than Colo nel George w. Anderson, one of my
 predecessors in congress. He was the ! prince of stump speakers, and nothing could depress his buoyancy of spirit.
 He believes that the world was made
 for people to enjoy themselves In, and
 he lives up thoroughly to his theory.
 Eat, drink and be merry Is his mot to and his creed.
 In many respects he has always re
 minded me of that immortal English statesman and orator, Charles James Fox.
 Along In the late sixties, while An
 derson was still a Republican, the