The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1902-08-31
THEY ARE DIFFERENT FROM BOYS
IN sUNDAY-SCHOOL BOOKS.
The Latter Contemplate Uncle Jere-
miah's Picture and Carry Jelly to
the Si~ck-FOrmer Grow Up.
BROOKLYN Times.

For all general purposes there are two
classes Of boys-gOod boys and bad boys.
Then we come to the more delicate task of
defining each. We all know what kind Of
an Indian constitutes a good Indian, but
the same rule cannot be applied TO boys.
If we believe the Sunday-school books-and
we have had it rummed into our ears that
Sunday-school books never liza good boy
is a sort of a monument of animate mush
and milk, with a good deal of sugar thrown
in. He is a boy who is always handicapped
at the start with a name Ike Enoch or
Simeon or Habakkuk, and then he must al
ways be studious and polite and must never
dream of getting his trousers torn or his
face dirty, and if any red-headed young
scamp comes and 'grinds" all his marbles.
he must at once go TO his mother and tell
her how glad he is that it happened, be
cause perhaps the red-headed boys papa is
not well TO do and cannot afford 10 buy
marbles for the red-headed boy. 1t never
occurs TO the good boy of the Sunday-schOol
book that he has a pair of fists that were
designed, among other things, to punch
heads. The Sunday-schoOl boy always has
his shoes polished. his hair brushed, his
ing corn silk, that delightful weed which
makes strong men turn pale, but does not
disturb the youthful organism.
When the Sunday-schOOl boy is not car
rying jelly or homemade pie to some sick
person-Which is not always an act of char
ity-he is generally seated in an OLD, fash
Toned arm chair contemplating the crayon
portrait of the late lamented Uncle Jere-
nlah, who stares out of his heavy gilt
frame upon the glass-covered waxed flowers
that stand on the piano. The Sunday-school
boy has been told repeatedly that If he
grows up to be like Uncle jeremiah he will
be able TO lift the mortgage from the farm.
The Sunday-school boy begins to follow the
example of the late lamented by endeavor-
| Ing TO wear his hair in the same fashion as
that adopted by the artist VINO commema-
rated Uncle Jeremiah in crayon. The Sun
day-school boy is shocked to discover that
the scallop over the forehead which he has
admired so many times as an evidence of
Uncle Jeremiah's desire to hide his massive
forehead from the public view, is a fashion
uncommonly popular among neat, cookbook
ing b~artenders, whose pictures the good boy
sees in the comic papers when he goes to
the barber shop to get a hair cut.
Between his jelly carrying and footstep
Following, and the reading of enlivening
tales of how poor old Fido played with the
children until he died of Group, contracted
in wandering about on a chilly night to see
that ali the windows were locked, the Sun
day-school boy does not have much time TO
be a real boy, and hence he is a good boy.
That is, he is a good boy according to the
standards of goodness established by our
worthy forefathers, who would let a man
starve to death if he had ever been guilty
OF swallowing a mug OF ale. Such is the
good boy.
THE BAD BOY.
The bad boy may be defined as any boy
who is not a good boy, as described above.
Thank heaven, the world is full of bad boys
of this kind. Bad boys are those who have
powerful lungs and deem it necessary to
howl their words when they have occasion
to converse on any topic. They are the
boys who acknowledge no authority but
that of their parents, who call their faith
erS pop and their mothers NOM who
/ annCnnf ~ n 80 [. - - IL
tie once a week. and when there is COM
pany to dinner; who stand still while
NOM is giving the necktie an artistic
twist, when they suddenly grasp MONS
cheeks in their rough little hands and kiss
her so violently and so often that she for
gets the scolding she gave them ten minutes
before for being so dirty, and her eyes fill
up with tears while she smies and kisses
the little fellow, and at the same time feels
like spanking him because the beautiful
necktie is all undone again, and the collar
Is somewhat crumpled.
The ambition of the ordinary bad boy is to
be a bandit, a pirate, a soldier, a sailor, or,
occasionally, a policeman. Peaceful profess
s1ons or prosaic business life have no at
fractions for him; he dreams of holding up
stage coaches, sinking g~alle0ns. or of being
a second Dewey or Roosevelt. In large
cities he finds some obstacles in the road to
any Of these goals, and so he takes it out
in rough games and nerve-shattering
noises.
The bad boy is not studious. He accepts
an education with the air Of a martyr and
does not do any more studying than is alb
sOlutely necessary to maintenance of
friendly relations" with pop" The bad
boy does not make a business of carrying
jelly and homemade p~ies-unless it is from
the pantry to his mouth-and he never
spends precious hours in the ontemplation
of crayon portraits and waXed flowers. He
has not time for such things. He is all for
athletics and the achievements of Terry
McGovern and Robert F-itzsimmons are
more attractive ID him than those of Bishop
Potter or Andrew Carnegie. The bad boy
will read about Sandow and try to get
muscles like his, rather than the sermons
in the Monday papers.
All of this may be very shocking and
perhaps there are those who will say that
1t shows a depraved taste, but il is true.
nevertheless, and the educational author
tiles are beginning 10 understand it.. The
educational authorities are becoming edu-
Gated to the fact that there is no getting
away from human nature, and so they
have taken steps TO make public education
attractive as well as instructive. To tina
end they have established a number OF
open-air gymnasiums.
EXHIBITING THE PROOF.
If there is any one who doubts the sue
cess Of this experiment he ought to go tc
the corner of Lafayette and Classon ave
nues some bright afternoon. There is a
plot of ground adjoining public schoo No
IS. The plot is fitted up with parallel bars
vaulting horses, horizontal bars, fyine
rings, rope ladders, punching bags and the
like. There are two instructors on hanC
and a perfect swarm of small BOYS who
try everything and howl with delight
Some of them are ragged little chaps. but
ragged boys are very much like other bows
in their ambitions. They gaze admiringly
on the big, supple muscles of the ~instruc,
tors, work diligently with some of the
apparatus and then roll up their sleeve:
and invite other youngsters to feel theil
biceps.
Those Of us who were boys-bad boys
once upon a time will recall that ii gave u.
more satisfaction to be able to skin tn,
cat" on a horizontal bar than il did to know
how far the Desert Of Cobb is from New
York. Yet we went about 'skinning tn
cat in a laundering sort of way and at tn,
imminent risk of falling from the bar anC
1attening our noses on the floor. Now Their,
is an instructor, provided by the city, wht
stands by and tells the youngsters Just how
TO do 1t and is ready TO catch them if the,
[ fall.
1t is worth going out Of your way 10 Sc,
these youngsters struggling TO chin them
selves over the bar and expanding abou
one thousand times more energy in tn
effort than they do over their books, and a
the same time enjoying the thing immense
ly. The punching bag is always the cente
of an interested group and the boy who car
make the bag keep time is the lion of tn
hour. no matter how he may stand in hi
studies. The whole thing is such an ex
cellent idea and works so well and the chill
dren are all so happy that ii does a ma
good to watch them, and makes him fee
that the money he pays in taxes TO sup
port the system OF public education is no
: being wasted.
OF course nobody would ever think o
making public education a matter of physi