Pine Bluff daily graphic. (Pine Bluff, Ark.) 1893-1942, 1902-03-24
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CHIMP CLHRK STORIES
Budget Of luit and Huroor Gathered by
, the Iuay

certain ncMUrrS only Il happy few
who can t;ike great liberties with tho
house without giving ofcnse. They
are, for Stule occult reason, considered
as privileged characters. Facile prin
ccps among these favorites is Hon
Peter Johnston DteN of Lynchburg Va
Whenever Mi. 0t2y rises. the mem
bers all settle comfortably in thci1
seats with thpir faces turned toward
the gray haired Nirginian in cxpee,a-
ton OF something racy. and they are
rarely disappointed.
When the army bill was up i'll the
Fifty-siNtb congress- Mr.. 0tey cffcl
ed an amendment providing an ade
Quatc number of dentists. He pref
acod his speech with this remark, al
most as daring as anything "Privatc"
John Allen ever said: Mr.. Chairman,
| do not thrust myself on the house
very often. When | dc, have some
thing to say that is tangible and worth
talking about" Just as he concluded
that breezy sentence. and While the
house was laughing and app,autling,
Mr.. Slayden Of Texas asked 0tcy some
question, whorcupon the latter said:
Il do not know to what the gentleman
from Texas refers. He reminds me of
the Irishinan Of whom heard story.
lie was eating eggs. The first one he
swallowed want down all right, but in
swallowing the second he heard the
sound of a chick rs it went down his
throat and then he exclaimed. Be
CORA. YOU have "A sweet voice, but YOU
spakc tore late, / want @pn!!@men to
come out now and say whether they
are going to take care of :},,.0o.oO0
teeth half Of which are aching all tho
time. appeal to gentlemen on this
! side Of the house and on the other side
regardless OF recent elections and re-
gartllesss Of political affiliations to
come forward and give the old soldier
the grand old solder7-a chance to
get rid of the toothache."
Fun in the House.
It is a We'll known fact that most
men, including congressman, will sign
most any so:t of 4 petition. It SO hap
! pened that a large majority of senators
and representatives had signed petit
tons asking the speaker of the house
and the president of the senate to per-
nit consideration of a separate bill
containing the provision of the Otey
amendment. With a great flourish OF
trumpets Brother Otcy proceeded tC
read the names. At last he read, "Sen
ator John Henry Gear of Iowa. And
then he added impressively, "Who has
gone" The next name he read was
Representative W. w. Grout Of Yer.
mont "Who will soon CO." added
Bailey of Texas in reference to the
fact than General Grout refused to be a
candidate for a seat in the house in
he did not do, as Governor Dillingham;,
having the longest pole, Knocked that
luscious persimmon just as General
CIRCUITS lips We're about to close upon
it. Otcy's amendment went through
with rush. as nearly every member
has had experience enough to convince
him that sweet Robbie Burns was
correct when he defined toothache as
the hell O. all Diseases
A Question Of Style.
There are fashions in styles Of speak
ing Just as there are in clothes. That
of Hon, Gilbert n. Haugen OF Iowa is
rather solemn. When he was Grating
on the Grout bill, Judge Griggs Of Geor-
gia. who possesses a rich vein of hui
NOR. said to Hon. D. H. Smith of Ken
lucky, Dave. as you are the most SOL
emn looking man in the house, suppose
you rise to u question of information
and ask Haugen where he studied the
ology."
Bailey's Humor.
The Grout bill brought forth good
deal of humor in the last congress. MI.
Bailey of Texas is very stately and
logical in his speeches. frequently elo-
ouent, but rarely humorous In his five
minute speech devoted chiefly to the
question Of coloring oleomargarine in
imitation of butter for purposes Of de-
ception he said: "Mr. Speaker, it fire.
quently happens that deception is an
i innocent one. No man claims that .
dairy stablishment-such, for instance,
as the great Elgin creamery-when it
| sends it's butter 10 one city more deeply
colored than to another does so fraud
ulently. There are many innocent and
harmless receptions and most OF all
about the question Of color. Who be-
lieves that Il beautiful woman, when
she happens to paint her cheek. Is try
ing to deceive US to our injury? Yet.
sir, many ladies' = God bless them!-
color their cheeks different from what
God and nature painted Them" These
jocose remarks of the young. stately,
handsome Texan brought down the
house.
Captain Lambs Surprising Parody.
One Of the noblest passages Lord BY,
ron ever wrote was his apOstrOphe to
Kirke White in his English Bards and
| ccotch Rovipwors"