Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1902-07-23
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%Z%Zzz1MiIWNN%%SSSS w
am airu'u .nat n'ss,hs pays gym
on sunday May De. saiu tne con
ten1ptuous riVai. BUT II 30 us tno
only Gay IN the seven on wnicn ne does
pay ~. as''"s .on ''a''
Ieacher--Now, Ethei' VINO wrote the
Elegy IN a country Churchyardf Etnei
-fiease, ma'am, 1t was Willie smlf.
l seen MIN goin IN the churchyard az
recess, maam.-Chicago Daily News
Mr.. Bingo-I am floor walker and
buyer for Lacem and Skirts Mr..
bango-Arduous job. 1t must be
great relief to get home nights. MI.
Bingo-Well, no; am floor walker
and buyer for that house. too.-Judge.
Crabbe-To-day for the first time I
was really delighted to hear Miss Mex.
dore's piano going. Ascum-Some-
thing worth listening to, eh? Crabbe-
! should say. heard the installment
men taking 1t away.-Philadelphia
Press.
Yeast-They say the darkest hour
is just before the dawn. Crimsonbeak
Yes; well know. when I've gone
home In the morning, and knew my
wire was waiting Tor me. thinks nave
looked unusually black. = fonkers
Statesman.
Attorney for the Defense-You are Q
blackguard and bluff, sir!
Attorney for the Prosecution-And
you, Sir, are shyster and rogue!
Inc Court-Come, come, gentlemen.
Let us get down 70 the disputed points
IN this case.-Smart Set.
Sunday School Teacher-And when
Delilah cut Samson's hair he became
mild as lamb, and there was no light
In him. DO you understand that Tom
my! Iommy-Well, ! know 1t makes
yer reel awfui 'shamed o yerseit ~ne"
yer mother cuts yer mar.
He does not have much admiration
for modern actors. authors or public
meu OF any sort. NO.. answered
Miss Cayenne; he Is one OF those poo
pie who believe that nothing Is as gooo
as 1t used to be, except their own op'n'
ions. Washington Star.
Mr.. Van Albert-Great Scotti Why
are not all these dishes washed? Mrs.
Van Albert-Because the cook Is using
the kitchen table. MIR. Van Albert
In what way? Mrs. Van Albert-she
Is playing game of ping-pong with the
policeman.-Brooklyn Life.
Guilty: do you know anything about
hypnotism 2" asked the girl in the pink
waist. "Well," replied the fiuffy-haircd
maid, as she held up her left hand to
display sparkling solitaire to better
advantage. you can Judge Tor your.
self. "-Chicago Daily News.
"And does your dolly close its eyes7'
said the minister, visiting Mt the house
of parishioner. "No, SIR replied tho.
little thing; "but Pm going to take her
to church some day, and see II she
will; papa says nearly everybody goes
to sleep there"-Yonkers Statesman.
Bedwin-Helter has rather often.
sive way with him. He doesn't know
me, never saw me but once before, and
vet he walks up with a provoking cool
ness and called me my good man."
Tlcknor-Called you good man. did he7
Oh, well, as you say, he doesn't know
you.
Still Booming: Eastern Man-How
ore things in Durout city now? West.
ern Man-Booming. lust ADJOINING,
why. hnppened to want little
snendinp money LAST week. and Il
didn't take me half an hour to get Z
third mortgage on nv house.-New
Work Weekly
Jen,,s-1 should think Won bnmorIsts
would cet lots Of funny souibs ont Of
his now nlon to cxtermlnate the mos.
ouitoe. uuch Norist-Not much. It.s
really serlous If the Man succeeds. ms
q nromIses to what IN earth Will We
hay. to ioke nbont in the summer
t,mea- pbIlade,nbio Record
~, .so,, Voc =, ,,,or s,rrr,sea
t,,, Won didn,t contr,bute 10 that CHAR.
INV AR phi Enthron--I didn,t hive
~ o,,ao,. roo,. VIII mo Mr. Ascrm.
H.. aftr cont niece ,ro,,,d ho,a ,ook.
-, ~. =, tnan, ~. DIT, pnthron
NJ. b. aa,,oa no,,,d : ,rr,.o M, M mo
1,e,veo.nt observation-disclosures
-.
80 c >,,,s p,.,.,, 49,, 49,.
pro,,n cir, made themselves rid,cu.
lousy nrominent ot tho musicale Inst
ntsht II wos nositive,v scondn,ousi
Wrs whi+a-For mcrcy,s soke what
dt1 thov do, Irs creene-no9 They
imst eat t,,ere MI tho evening listen,no
70 tho nus,c. md novor n, Good = worS
hotwoon them -Roston rronscrInt
nv, -, -,
IN, ns no st Ivy .. aa,s",, A a., 'e
piru ,ies.' sunny. "sNeu .ue soou.
whom he met In Boston Common.
no. sir" replied the intellectual prod.
igy, as he continued to gaze up Into the
tree; 81 am merely endeavorlng to cor.
rectly classify this tree as n botanical
nroductn Columbus State journal.