New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1902-04-19
TIE TALK OF THE DAY.

Some years ago Prince Ghen Count Minister.
with Count Beust AMI Count Schouvalon. was at
tending q Foreign Office reception In LONDON.
Their names afforded slight difficulty to the
Thoroughly English footman. who announced the
guests by shouting their up the great stair
case Count Schouvalo1 arrived first, and the foot
man duly announced him as Count Shufneoh.
Ti!en came Count Beust. whose name in the ser
vitor's mouth became Count Beast Lastly Count
Munster appeared, and the footman evidently feel
ing that supreme effort required. finished off
by calling ont Count Monster"
Damaged by the Storm.--Stranger-Did the late
storm do much damage in this section? :, ala T
rained so hard that my wife and six darters. who
got caught in it, rushed into the Cross Roads store
to me.-(New-York Weekly.
1t is now possible insure in London against
the risk of smallpox breaking out in the contigu-
Gus houses. the idea being, of course to protect
the assured against expense incurred by temporary
removal. The rate is minimum of 10 shlllings
per cent for the year the risk of course extending
over an indefinite number Of people. One broker.
who was In this business from the start. has been
doing hardly anything else for several days and
many who at first laughed at the whole thing are
now coming into the market
Condoned-Mamma-Did you tell God how
Ethel-Yes. and guess I wasn't SO naughty
A Kansas editor recently contradlcted report
that a young woman in his county was about TO
abandon school teaching in order get married.
adding She is not that kind of a girf'-whereby
he meant that she would not break contract
But the girl interpreted the phrase differently.
and wrote to the editor to give MIN "a piece of
her mind" II don't know" she said that ii is
any of your business, but I give you to under
stand that I not the kind of a girl you say. I
can get married if I want to-
negro who had been arrested on suspicion
gave himself away" in clever reply to a aues-
How old are ;you9" asked the justice.
You don't know your own age?"
Wen. now, that's stranger"
You may think so now, sub. was the reply,
but wen you hez been in de penitentary ez long
ez I hcz, you'll lose track er time, too!'-(Atlanta
Constitution.
Two rowing rustics outside the Writer Gardens.
London. were overheard recently discussing the
word ping pong that appeared in the windows.
After long puzzling to the meaning and how IT
tasted. they finally decided to go IN and call for
"a pot ut to try. supposing it to be drink
for coronation time.
Progressing Rapidly.-"Hullo Bifkins! How is
your Anti-siang Society getting alongs''
Fine silk old observation-disclosures News.
private" John Allen told this story in Washing
ton the other day: There is East ST. Louis
citizen named Zelerbaum. Zeerbaum saw little
service during the Civil War; but insists that he
was in the greatest battles. To his hearers one
night a Grand Army campfire Zellerbaum was
telling of his prowess in two battles. A little man
in the back OF the hall arose. Both those battles
fought the day and fifteen hundred
miles apart he said. My friends shouted Zeller-
baum, there is traitor among us! Throw the
rebel QUIT. And they did
Unnecessary Neutrality-suspicious. Sarah "a spinster)
Now. dear If you would only watch closely
you might learn how to crochet.
Little Bessie-Oh, I'm goin to get married when
1 grow up!-(Puck.
The other day the vicar of an Oxfordshire village
called upon by parishioner who. being
afflicted with shingles asked that he might be sup
piled with of the grease upon which the
church bell swung. He Dissenter, who had
become the leader of the local Salvation Army
regiment. But his confidence in the grease OF the
church bell had survived generations OF anti
cericalism.
Worst and Best.-'You didn't put as much vim
usual into the line, Villain. do your worst :"
said the manager.
Perhaps not" answered Mr.. stormington Barnes.
Just then happened to think of the agent who
went to get us transportation to New-York was
too busy hoping he would do his best "-(Wash-
tO&ton Star.