The Virginia enterprise., 1902-02-21
i Facts and Fancies. -

i Facts and Fancies. -
N~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Tragedian-"My parents tried
hard to keep me from becoming m act.
| or" The Villain-"I congratulate them
OH their success. Tit Bits.
els your uncle coming home from the
Philippines SOOn?' asked the visitor.
YES" said the editors little boy; ''his
subscription has expired. d.'-Indianapolis
News.
\ Guest. - sundayschool Teacher
"Who were the Maccabees?" Tommy
water an gev my pop ty'foy fever."-
Philadelphia Press.
why is; it. that. powder factories tpay
such high wages?" Because the EN-
ployes are likely at any moment to be
blown up and thrown out of employ
ment.'-New York Sun.
Too Often the Way.-'I understand
81 B!lklns as made great hit on the stage"
audience made the hit; Bilkins was the
target. t."-Baltimore News.
She Knew.-Teacher-'Spell tray "
Elsie-'"T-r-a-y." Correct Now, then.
when the t. is taken away what is left -
"a lot of dishes and things to be
washed. d.'-Philadelphia Press.
May-"I wonder why Reggie never
married" Jack-"He had Il love affair
over it," .:'Who was the object Of his
alfections:' Himself" ."-Harlem Life.
Knicker-"When [ was alone with
Miss Smith in the parlor l proposed. l
told her she was the light Of my hfe.''
Bocker-"4And shc--''
Knicker-''Oh. she went out. Tit
Bits.
"Now, see here. Pat, suppose I should
get you that situation, would you keep
''Io tell yc the thruth, sor. my itlee
w'u'd be to make it kape mc."-Philadel-
phia Press.
she-...'Well, I've got a position in the
chorus.''
He-':Where is your place."
She-"As you face the stage Tn the
fourth pair of legs on the left. The
Garcon in Town Topics.
rIOA 1ON "A l..
Said a cranky dyspeptic from Ia.:
II wish my dyspepsia would tii;,"
But, alas! 'twould not fly,
And when offered mnce pie.
He WAS forced to eXclaim: "Take that pia!"
Philadelphia Press.
The Test in IIarlem-Gazzam latter
he has succeeded in waking his wife,
"Opcn the dorsh!'' Mrs Gazzam (hcad
out of the .second-story windoM)-"Are
YOU sobcr?" Gazzan-"Yesh." Mrs.
Gazzanl-"Thcn say reciprocity. .'-Har-
lem Life.
American Millionaire-'I was rather
struck with that young Lord De Broke.
[ think / shall let Evadne marry him.
Mrs. Millionaire (doubtfully)- "H'm!
Did he ask how much money you had?'
mo: he asked Inc how got it,
Moonshine.
Why He lleturned.-"Did You come
back for something you forgot?' asked
Mrs. barley, when her husband returned
to the house 4 few minutes after leav
ing. NO. my DEAR replied he, Il came
back for something 1 remembered"
Town Topics.
Henry, how is The plot. Of that sea
chapter there is terrible storm, and the
passengers are afraid the boat will go to
the top You mean to the bottom."
No: this is a submarine boat" ."-Phila-
delphia Record.
Appropriate. - Cassidy-"Oi want Il
wreath av. flowers, an put on it: He
rests in pieces" Florist-''Don't you
mean: He rests in peace?" Cassidy
"Oi name phwat Oh sed 'Tis for Casey
that was blowed up in the quarry
Philadelphia Press.
Say. said the man with the sallow
complexion, you have plum pudding
spe' ni wrong on your bill of farc''
Flows that" asked the prorrietor of
the lunchhouse.
"Well, it's heavy enough to be spelled
plumb '"-Phila1elphia Record.
Douglas Jerrold, the English Wit, was
once sitting with George Henry I.cwes
and poet named Heraud, who was
something of 3 bore and good deal
laughed at. Lewes asked Jerrold: ''Have
you ever seen Heraud's Descent Into
HELP" ''No: but l should like to-" tersc-
ly replied the wit
In making the announcements to his
congregation recently, an Episcopal min
lister whose parish is not more than
thousand miles from San Francisco, said:
Remember our communion service
next Sunday. The Lord is with us in
the forenoon and the bishop in tine even
ing.'-San Francisco Wave.
Mamma. does little black girls 90 to
hevun?''
Yes, DEAR replied the mother, ''of
course they do
Lulu was quiet for time, then she
said aloud but apparently to herself:
Goodness. they must be offul bizzy
keeDin' their wings blacked up:'-Ohio
State Journal.
The Gift of Responsiveness.
The responsive woman. although not
necessarily wearing her heart upon her
sleeve" cannot hide its beautiful, unset
ish qualities. It is at the core Of her
nature, a part Of her life, to force what