The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939, 1902-01-10
Mr.. METHUSELAT1
By RICHARD BARRIER SHELTON.

I-.-I - J = - 80 = -
would take about three funerals a. day to keep
| him in his normal condition"
| well probe Him when he gets back" said
Frost. eff he tells us anything it'll be the
| truth
| Eyes, if he tells us anything, Paine as
| sented.
| The wonder occasoned by Mr.. Methuselahss
| departure had not subsidized when at the ex-
| piration of the two weeks he returned, the
| same stoop shouldered, baIdheaded Me-
| thuselah, yet with air of sprightliness and
I decision about him which was at once new
and perplexng AS Ed Frost4put it, I'm
/ hanged il know what it is, but something
| has happened
/ Several days went past, and other changes
were noted in the paying teller. His reserve
] had disappeared. Once even he essayed
ponderous witticism. Then came the most
startling development of all.
| The boys We're washing up one afternoon
! when they heard an apologize cough behind
| them, and, turning saw Mr. Methuseah
twiring his hat and looking decidedly ill at
ease 1t took several moments of preliminary
/ hemming and having before he found the
| courage to address them
Boys, II want to make bargain with
YOU he began nervously. 81 hope it won't
| appear foolish you know, but / want to ask
you to drop that Methuselah. Never minded
/ it before, you know, but now somehow do
If it's all the same to you, wish you'd call
| me .yMr.. James instead He paused and
brushed imaginary specks from the hat ..If
you will, we'll all go to the ball game this
/ afternoon me-
eIl-what?" said Sam Paine dropping
the soap on the floor
| ''All go to the ball game on me- Mr.. Me-
| thuselah repeated.
. Say it again, will your said Billy Rey-
nolds, with his hand behind his ear.
''All go to the ball game on me- Mr.. Me-
! thuselah reiterated. Il hope it's bargain, :"
he added eagerly.
Sure thing said Ed Frost. ''Neyer meant
any offense you know. Names are all one to
l us. Quite as soon call you Mr. James as the
other, Mr.. Meth-er-Mr. James, mean"
(. Thanks" with evident relief "And you'll
join me at the gamer" Mr.. Methuselah made
his exit amid varied chorus of Certainly"
| "Of course, !" with pleasure
Billy Reynolds was down early next NOR
ming. lounging in the window, as usual with
the morning paper. He glanced over the
| upper edge and saw Hardy come in.
Strikes me- George said he, that Me-
thuselah was pretty lively for just
getting over rheumatic fever
| Appendicitis, you mean Hardy corrected.
He told me himself it was rheumatic fe-
ver," Billy protested.
| We'll, ne described the rigors of appended
It's very wildly to me. ;" said Hardy.
Billy Reynolds gave low whistle Of sur
prise The old FOSSILS been stringing u.s.
said he, land botching it like an amateur,
too" ...
Lets find out what he told the Others -
said Hardy
| The following day was overcast, and at
closing time great sheets Of rain rafting
down. The paying teller had Just slipped into
his oyercoat when he found half dozen very
solemn faced young men before him.
I'VE are here began Sam Paine as spokes-
Joan of m at a
given out by yourself Mr.. Methus-er-James,
and to ask you to reconcile them if you will
/ Paine cleared his throat, and Methuselah,
looking very much like an animal at bay,
!. mumbled. go on
cit SEEMS Paine continued, "that while
away recently you had a serious attack OF
appendicitis, according to your statement to
, Mr.. Harvey, and at the same time you had the
misfortune (this is what you told Billy Rey-
7 nolds) to be laid up with rheumatic fever.
! Moreover, if we are TO take into consideration
> statements made to Mr.. Frost and myself
4 respectively, you suffered the pangs OF heart
= failure and were threatened with pneumonia
I of the right lung. We want to congratulate
t you on constitution which could bring Tou
safely through these complications. But, with
! all these ills your flesh was heir to, you en-
!, joycd immensely your hunting trip In the
Adrondacks remember what you told Mr..
! Clark and, although you spent the entire
| two weeks there tins next is from MI
Gray) it did not deter you from passing a
> most delightful fortnight at Old Orchard.
Pardon US if we question how you managed. y
5 At first Mr.. Methuselah's face was study
of wrath Then his eyes roved about wildly,
> as il he were contemplating flight. At the
t end of the speech he leaned against the wall,
. white and shaken. "
.I-I--'' he began. Its none OF your
t confounded business!" he blurted out. He
turned on his heel and angrily snatched the
cover from his umbrella. AS he did SO a
t stream Of small white kernels fell to the floor.
''Rice by Jove!" some one gurgled. On one
side Mr.. Methuselah and on the other the
group of half dozen stood staring stupidity
! at the white grains. Ed Frost was the first
to rise to the situation. He stepped forward
= slipping his arm through Mr.. Methuselah's,
and as he led him away he told the boys over
: his shoulder that he knew quiet place down
the street. E..=