The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1902-07-04
bad little egg and got mashed on =,
ctress!TOwn TOPICS.

bad little egg and got mashed on an
actress! -Town Topics.
The Youth-Yes:' Pm in business for
myself, but I don't, seem to be able 10
The Sage-Nobody, ever meets witt,
business, young man! He mist %ove,taNc
it-Philadelphia Press.
"That girl can't talk little Bit" "
"Quite, true. The only thing she said
to me during the whole evening was
NO., and | had to Propose to Ter to. get
her to say rhat.''-Stray Stories. - ~.
COMPELLED 70 SHUT DOWN.
With coal exceedingly dear today,
And hourly going higher
IT'S safe. to say
That Mont Pclee
Will have to draw its fire. j:
The clergyman's little: boy was spend.
ing the afternoon with the bishops chill.
dren. AT the rectory," he said. we've
got hen that lays an egg every. dav.''
''Pooh!' said Master Bishop, my father
lays foundation stone once week.
Tit-Bits.
"Oh, you cruel boy" cried a member of
t Fi tA"t SSG ird TO be trying to
"Bird?'' echoed the small boy, deris-
lively. II guess you're a stranger in
these parts; that's a Jersey mosquito!'-
Baltimore Herald.
"You admit you stole the melons ~ said
the judge.
ooh, yes, subj stole um!'
''And yet you ask for mercy?''
Yes, sub; kaze de white man kotched
me fo' had chance ter eat umv'-At-
lanta Constitution.
''Bimpkins has bought a great thing.
He saw an advertisement Offering a Ger
tain preventive Of seasickness for s. and
sent the money; ="
''And got for his money -?
"a postal card advising him to stay
ashore News.
Salesman-Here's the same book in a
fine binding in half calf.
Mrs. 'Munniworth-O half calf?
suppose that's because of the Beef Trust.
But I can afford whole calf. l should
feel ashamed to have a book in the house
that was not the real thing.-Boston
Transcript.
A father fearing an earthquake in the
region of his home sent his two boys to d
distant friend until the peril should be
over. "A few weeks after the father re-
ceived this letter. from his friends,
''Please take your boys home and send
down the earthquake. "-Glasgow Even
ing Ilmes' u, ,"L,, 49,,
Miss Fairfax-Good mawnin', Aunt
Caroline. Why s eiln't ysa s u e y now
Aunt Caroiiae removing her pipe from
her mouth)-SWeH syous see; MISC CLARA,
rs bin out q wuhk so long dat now,
when I: could wuhk, I finds rs dome los''
nah taste TO- it.-Judge.
Ethel Ito Jack, distractingly handsome)
but impecunious, who has Just proposed)
Why, Jack, you foolish boy! You
couldn't even dress me.
Jack (who sees heaven slipping away
from him)-Don't throw me over like
that, Ethel. Cou-cou-cou-couldn't I
II think the seventeen-year locust is an
interesting study" observes the lady Of
uncertain age:
ut must BE-" we answer thoughtlessly,
respectfully to one who has traced them
down from generation to generation,
But, Of course, it was her own fault
American. .
Uncopyrighted Idea.-Wife Ito her
husband)- Arthur, love, want you to
give John a good scolding tomorrow
morning.
Husband What for. am perfectly
satisfied with the fellow.
Wife-WeL, you see. he has to beat
the carpets tomorrow, and he strikes ever
so much harder when he's iii bad ten F
per-Pearson's Weekly. * IS
An 11-foot torpedo boat, built for one
man, has been invented by Thomas j..
M0riarfY OF NeWnOrt. IL. j 49,.