davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01
THE IRRIGATION MEETING.

1T IS EXTREMELY IMPORTANT
1 that Assembly hall be filed with the
representative men Of Salt Lake
and Utah this afternoon on the
occasion of the address which
Is TO be made by Professor F..
II. Newell on the new irrigation law.
Professor Newell. as is generally
known. is chief engineer of the United
States geological survey and a reeog-
nized authority on irrigation matters.
He viii be prepared 20 answer any
questions that may be asked him this
afternoon and TO give great deal Of
valuable Information about irrigation
generally. Professor Newell should be
greeted by a crowded house. At this
meeting. too, It is desirable that the
irrigationists agree on some one plan
for prosecuting the work in Utah IN
der the new law.
II Professor Newell could so back to
Washington with such a plan in his
pocket. II would aid him very mate
rally in arriving at q decision as to
which is the best place TO begin opera
tons. Utah should share largely in
the first proceeds from the sale of pub
lie lands. for IL was IN Utah that the
irrigation movement was given It's first
impetus.
II will be impossible, however, for
Utah TO secure any OF these funds un-
less the irrlgators of the state get to-
gether on some one proposition. No
citizen who can possibly spare the
time will fail 20 appear at the Assem-
bly, hall this afternoon. The meeting
viii be opened promptly at o'clock.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01
g g. 9
Pittsburg Dispatch1
BUGS.

CWill Stokes in Army and Navy Journal)
o, the Central raised the devil with the
Kernel. so It's said,
About a little hitch in the formsshun at
PARADE
And the Kernel told the Major that his
handling the battalion
Resembled Ward McAllister a-leadin' a
cotillion:
An the Major hauled the Capn up about
some oversight
Manooverin the company while breakin'
from the right;
An the Capn gravely caushuned the
Lootenant, bar in mind,
An keep the rear rank well closed up
and properly alfned.
o. them big bugs hev bigger bugs,
That jump on EN- an bite EN-;
An the bigger bugs hev other bugs.
An so-ad infinitum.
The Sargent med a break an the Looten-
ant collared him,
Politely intimatin' thet he didn't know a
dem:
An the Sargent soon an error in pre-
servin' distance spied,
An got a shot at Darringer, the Corp raj
who was a guide;
Dut Darringer said nothin'-he jest waited
fer his chance
An promptly gev some scorchin' Views
on tactics to the Lance,
Who opened fire on Private Dean fer
sDilin' all the wheels.
An Dean cussed Smith. his rear rank
man, fer steppin on his heels.
O. them big bugs heV bigger bugs,
That jump on EN- an bite EN-;
An the bigger bugs hey other bugs.
An so-ad tnfinitum.
Twas all wound up in barracks when
the reg ment was dismissed,
An Deans eye rather funnily ran foul
o. Smithy's fist,
An we stood on chairs an tables an we
backed EN- Ter the beer,
While the clamor of the battle woke the
echoes far an near;
II was list a rough an tumble but
most instruetiV' fight.
Till the sergeant an a detail o. the gyard
hove into sight:
An they TUX EN-. blown and bloody, an
they locked EN- in the mill,
An'-thet's all tibet | remember OF the big
review an drill.
'Cept tibet big bugs hev bigger bugs
That jump on EN- an bite EN-;
An the bigger bugs hev other bugs,
An so-ad infinitum
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01
salt Lake CITY.
seabrooke's Middle Name.

tNcW lOEh lintS.l
Those who have been worrying their
young lives away in a vain effort 10 find
out what the 20" stands for in Thomas
Q. SeabroOke's name need trouble no
longer. The comedian last week settled
the matter himself.
THE @ in my name" said he stands
for 'Qurika.' 1t Is an Indian name. When
I was barely a year old my father had
some government business which took
him 20 Fort Thomas AriZ.. among the
Apache Indians. He took mother and
baby with him. The Indians who loafed
round our place took a great fancy 10
me. they patted me on the cheek and
called me 'Qurika.' NV father was
greatly amused al it, and after a while
began to call me @ for short The
name stuck to me as ! grew up. and as
] had no middle name / finally took this
pet family name for my middle name,
as il harmonized euphoniously with the
rest OF my cOgnOmen.'
But what in the world does 'Qurika
mean he was asked.
''Oh. that's Indian for pretty boy, ="
replied Seabrooke.
And the comedian looked daggers when
some one, laughed.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01


Judge and Mrs. Bartch for the past
few days. will leave this evening for
California. On theft return they will
remain in the city for some time.
g g @
Judge and Mrs. z. d. Hoge have re-
turned 10 their home in town after a
Mrs. Joseph Stras Peery, in ogden.
g g .
Today. in the temple, the marriage OF
Miss Minerva May Margetts and Harry
Ostler win take place, and will be fol-
lowed by a large reception at the home
OF the brides grandparents, Mr.. and
Mrs. 81. p. Richards.
9 o .
Mr.. Hugh Park, who has been in
Muskegon. Mich, attending the mar
riage of DR.. Park, viii return this
morning.
Mr.. and Mrs. G. F. Morse have re-
turned from their wedding trip, and
are al l24 3 street.
Mrs. Louise Smedley Smith will leave
tomorrow for an eastern trip. She will
be gone all winter.
g 81 .
Mrs. Grant Swan has returned from
a visit in the east.
% g .
Miss Hattie Jennings was the hostess
at a very delightful euchre
party given in honor OF Miss Pauline
Groo. Prizes were won by Miss June
Mcintyre Miss Elizabeth Groo and
Miss Fannie Bird.
9 @ g
The Sewing club meets this afternoon
with Mrs. Joseph Richards. and Fri
day afternoon the same club meets
with the Misses Howat
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01
EzRA's BURGLAR.


Now let a sad refrain be gurgied.
EZra's office has been burgied;
He who smiles is but a brute;
Chief Paul's out in hot pursuit
VIII he catch 'em2 Nit. nat, not;
Only IN pursuit he's hot.
The individual who iabors under
The impression that Chief Paul
Can catch anything except an
Order for four hacks for a fu-
Neral has got al least one
More guess coming 10 him.
TIE BURGLARY itself wasn't so
L bad. It was the way the fellow
rubbed IN II that hurts. He picked
the lock 10 the mayors office. pulled
down the blind so that nobody could
look in and see him. fastened the front
door with a chair and then broke
open the mayors desk. That last was
simpiy a BIT OF pleasantly. Ezra had
5000 In cold cash inside his desk that
he was calculating to give to the Re-
publican campaign fund.
Probably the burglar was a mind
reader He thought the campaign fund
needed the money worse than he did,
so ne let II alone. over the desk hung,
and SIN hangs. portrait OF ChleI
Paul. From behind a cloud OF soft,
gray whiskers, the peaceful counte-
nance OF the great thief takers doomed
benignantly. Long and earnestly the
burglar gazed into that face; that is.
he gazed into It as well as he could
for the whiskers.
OF course the base miscreant knew
that he would never look upon the
countenance of Chief Paul In his off,
cial capacity. That would be expecting
too. too much. So he fixed the Inca
ments IN his memory and. having
smudged them gently with his grimy
fingers. he went softly out. The chief
and Mayor Thompson have our sin
cerest sympathy. We trust they viii
bear up bravely under this blow that
has fallen upon them and that their
true friends viii hasten 10 extend to
them the hand Of consolation.
s"Copner
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01

The advancement OF science does not
demand that the last miserable six feet
OF earth and SOD shall be denied TO hui
mainly. II cadavers mast be secured
for dissection they can be secured from
JaiIs and other penal institutions In
numbers sufficient to answer every pur-
pose.
The ends Of justice VIII not be at
tanned until the faculty Of the medical
college that bought the indianapolis
oorpses fully explains its part in the
proceeding.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01
A Schoolboy's Logic.

Indifferent correspondents Will syInpa-
thize with the lad vino. after he had been
at boarding school for a week without
writing 10 his parents. peHned the follow
ing letter:
Dear PEOPLE, am afraid | shall not
be able 10 write often 10 you. because,
YOU see. when anything Is happening I
haven't time 10 write. and when nothing
is happening there's nothing 10 write
about So. now. gOod-by. from your
Georgie."
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01
cHILDREN's SAYINGS.
Cute Words of Wisdom Glesned From
Various Sources.
(Roston Transcript.)

ABOSIOu 1I4uoCfAESJ
Mother-Pm afraid. Tommy. you are
not much of favorite with your
teacher.
Tommy-oh, yes. am, mamma; she
makes me stay after school every day.
Just 10 keep her company.
Cincinnati Enquirer)
II was Tommys first glass Of soda
water that he had been teasing for so
long
well. Tommy, how does ii taste?"
asked his father.
why" replied Tommy. with puz-
zled face, 'it tastes Ike your foot's
asleep
A Salisbury paper tells OF a little
Salisbury boy who noticed that his
father had old teeth. He asked; Pa
pa, what you goiR TO do with the old
teeth?"
Throw them away. son." returned
the father.
'IH bet you don't" came from the
boy I'm bet you have 'em cut down
for me-
90 @ o
(Boston Globe.)
Angry Mother-Now, Bobby. don't let
me speak 10 you again.
Bobby (helplessly)-How can I pre-
vent you, mamma?
g g @
washington Times.)
A man had been absent for some
time, and during his absence had raised
a pretty luxuriant crop of whiskers,
mustache. etc. on returning home he
.rfc Ia
was very fond Of
The little girl made no demonstration
toward saluting him With kiss. as
was usual.
why. child" said the mother, don't
you give Uncle VIII a kiss?''
why. ma" returned the little girl
with the most perfect simplicity. Il
don't see any place."
g y 6
(Tid-Bits.)
Indignant Mother-George, II you had
little boy who made himself as dirty
as you are. what would you do 10 him?
George (aged 3, muddy from head to
foot)--I-Fd wish him.
o O. O
(Harper's Bazar.l
William Slimson. jr.-Do you believe
III DNAAS MINT "
Mrs. W. Slimson-Certainly, Willie,
and hope you always Will. Why do
you ask?
William-Because, mamma, ! heard
the little boy on the next block had
the measles, and I've been visiting him
all the afternoon.
6 s. q
Isl. Louis Post-Dispatch.)
The Parson-My boy, Pm Sorry TO
see you flying your kite on the Sab
bath.
Small Boy-Dat's all right. mister.
Dis kites made NV a ligious paper.
See?
8 g. 8
CPittsburg Dispatch)
II am afraid. Bobby" said his moth
er. that when tell your father what
a naughty boy you've been he will
punish you severely"
Have you got TO tell him?" asked
Bobby earnestly.
''Oh. yes; / shall tell him immediate
iy after dinner"
The look of concern on Bobby's face
deepened.
well, mother" said he. give
him better dinner than usual. You
might do that much for me-"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01

(Karnes County. Tex. News.)
one OF the meanest and most contempt
bic things in the world is a two-faced
man. He Is a liar. a thief and coward.
these things being only the natural ac-
iuncfs 10 MS ruling passion. he cen stir
I'D more dissenSiOn. provoke more disor-
der and create more III feeling in ten
minutes than can be remedled IN ten
years. He belongs in the same category
with the SossiDer. the scandalmonger
ard the talebsarer, and they all belong
in the neither cline.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01
Familiar Process.

Having abundance OF time on his hands
the discharged employee OF the state inSti-
tuition took long steamer ride on the
lake
Did you enjoy the trip" they asked
him. after his return.
Not much" he said. '-The water was
too rough.
How did you pass the timer
Making involuntary cQntribptions.
mostly"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01
No other Place For Him.

IT A4ldACAll4ld ANcSsf
IF YOU swear that way" said Rev
Goodman. repr0Tingiy. you won't get 10
heaven"
~Ohi I've got better chance than most
people" replied the hard case. "A Il bet
the general scarcity OF skilled labor will
pull me through"
And are YOU a skilled laborerE'
Yes. I'm an expert harp tuner"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01

So our old friend District Attorney
Eiehnor is going to continue as chair
man OF the Republican county commit
tee. Dennis should remember that all
things. including defeat. come to him
who keeps everlastingly at the game
OF politics.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01
Discrimination.
Philadeiohia Ledser)
T.. - - .arrs

At the foot OF the Il" stairs al an
10 town station in New YORK there is a
little covered shack conducted By q ne
gro brother and proudly labeled, Shine
Inside"
In 'front.' is a Dlacard on which. in
struggling letters. is the following an
nouncenent.
NO more ladies shsned here"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01
AmnsemeHk.

THE Toy Maker went before an
other good audience last evening at
the Salt Lake theatre. At today's mat
fnee the last performance viii be given.
Every child present will receive toy.
Tonight the Tivoli Opera company viii
present the famous B0stonian success.
1.-The Serenade," which viii be repeat
ed tomorrow night.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01

Brigadier General Sumner says the
expedition against the Moros does not
rise to the dignity Of war. Wonder
what the Filipino widows and orphans
think about Il.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01

There was another big audience at
the Grand last evening to witness the
second performance OF "Thelma."
There win be a special matinee this
afternoon and the engagement Will
close tonight.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01

The state fair OF 1902 was opened yes
terday under conditions that more
than fulfilled all promises. Now, in
order 20 make the remaining days all
that they should he. it is only neces-
sary for every citizen to get out and
see the great things at Agricultural
park.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01

We rather guess Wen have TO quit
making fun of the fool who lights his
fire with kerosene. Justice David
Brewer Of the United States supreme
court lighted his with gasoline.
Strangely enough. he lives 10 tell the
tale. Any time Justice Brewer gets
ready TO leave the bench we know a
responsible dime museum manager
who'll give him a good job.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01
LOVES HOPE.

AS from heaven above.
To be my JOY sublime.
Were YOU sent, sweet dove?
In vain a sea divides US.
Dry viii become the ocean.
No fear-the time is coming:
The heat OF our hearts. ful " Devotion,
Is wales will consume.
Ezra jay Ellerstein.
salt Lake CITY.
(AIr. Ellerstein Is a young German, four
wears in this country. He has never had
a lesson in English. What he knows OF
the language ne has learned by hard
study without the aid OF a teacher. He
has written a number of articles that
have appeared in eastern publications.)
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01

II Judge King is TO follow the trail
OF Candidate Howell it is certain that
Bre'r Howell viii have to hurry or he'll
be run over.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01

Mr.. and Mrs. Morris ". Child and
Mrs. James Henry Hartshorn Of Bos-
ton. who have been the guests OF
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1902-10-01

II was Tommys first glass Of soda
water that he had been teasing for so
long
well. Tommy, how does it taste?"
asked his father.
why" replied Tommy. with puZ-
zled face, 'it tastes Ike your foot's
asleep
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1902-10-23

paid American labor against the pau
per labor of Europe. Rates fixed on
this basis would give our labor all the
protection needed. and such a tariff
would furnish ample revenue to defray
the expenses of the government. \ tar
iff commission could work on this basis,
and If its recommendations should be
enacted into law by congress this coun-
try would be benefited. But it would be
difficult to have them adopted, and
each change would / fear, precipitate q
general tariff debate and general legls-
lation. Years ago proposed this COM
mission scheme and introdced bill
providing for a commission, but 1t was
never enacted into law.
1t is probable that the present con-
gress may take the subject up, tho 1T is
possible the proposed measure may not
make progress enough to be completed
at the short session and hence may be
turned over to the new congress. 1t
will be noticed that Senator Cullom ia
vors the Iowa plan of making tariff
changes when needed. a proposition
that has a growing number of adher-
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1902-10-23
minds the stage has known long periods

minds the stage has known long periods
of degradation. AT intervals, however,
strong spirits have arisen in the drama
to vindicate its intrinsic intellectual
worth and moral potentiality, to assert
its educational drift and to exalt and
extend its social influence. A noble
personal force, in fact, sometimes SHIN
ing forth in great affluence and SPLEEN
dor, and never quite extinct, has been
the salvation of the stage, which but
for this ordainment, would long since
have sunk to ignominous frivolity.
This intelligent saving force, which be-
liaves in ART and is devo LED to it's cause,
has kept the stage alive in honor and
prosperity. and upon this force it's de-
pendence must rest. The stalwart pres
ence of Richard Mansfield in the Amer
lean theater, therefore, is suspicious In
a high degree; for there is great need
of a leader, and the need will increase
with every accession to the phalanx OF
theatrical button-m makers now rampant
in a transitory time.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1902-10-23
HnG DISEASE PREVAILING.

A swine plague is declmating hogs in
several sections of the state. 1t pre-
walls in northwestern Iowa and in
southern sections of the state. 1t is
said that many hogs In the southern
Iart of the state are affected With
,richina, and that the state board OF
health will cause a careful examination
to be made. The disease creates havoc
and causes distrust among those who
,.se pork. 1t entails a serious loss TO
hosts of farmers. and Its abatement al
fords serious study to those in the
state whose duty it is to stamp 1T out
as rapidly as possible.
The prevalence of disease among
hogs arouses public sentiment anew
against the use of pork. To begin with
the rooter receives a black eye from a
large number of people who believe
that even the healthy and Wholesome
animal is unfit for human food They
never use it. This. however, does not
prevent an enormous SoilseiiiPeioAi "
pork in the various forms in which it
is presented For this reason those
who buy it frequently or occasionally
grow suspicious of it when disease
RACES among the herds. If the supply
is decreased by disease, consumption
falls off without doubt to an equal ex-
tent until the public is reassured.
If 1t were not for diseases among
swine, hog raising would prove one OF
the most profitable industries on the
farm, The hazard keeps many from
enbarking in it largely. 1t is one of the
checks to production that is bound to
come and it's temperance from time
to time is one of the aggravating fea-
lures of farm life.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1902-10-23
M>,al<ez9
A Futile Effort.


The effort of democrats to refute the
lie tariff policy was responsible for
throwing hundreds of thousands of
people out of employment will be utter
sly futile. Every intelligent man knows
that such is the fact and the history of
the period of industrial depression and
idleness from 1898 to 1897 is accessible
to all! Competent authority has esti-
mated that during that time 100000
men were out of employment, while the
wages of those employed were con-
stantly forced down, many working
only part time at that.
1t is true that the democratic tariff
law was not enacted until 1894, but the
success of the democracy in 1892
threatened the overthrow of protection
and the industries of the country be-
coming alarmed Immediately curtailed
operations and continued to lessen pro-
duction until the law was passed. How
great was the loss of labor from this
depression, due mainly if not wholly to
the democratic assault on protection, 1T
is not possible to compute, but it was
enormous.
The democratic party is again at
lacking protection, but it will hardly be
able to persuade intelligent working
men that it would be well to repeat the
experience of only a few years ago.
whcih many of them must viVldly re-
member. The democratic tariff pollcy
would do Unreasonable injury TO
American labor.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1902-10-23
IOWA NEWSPAPERS.
loN-tH.N-Aks-S<>s-e<A-s-s-S>|
APATHY?
washington Press.l

We had not seen the Iowa papers for
five weeks, and did not know whether
they had got the tariff adjusted or not.
But they do say there is wonderful
apathy in the campaign and they fear
a light vote that would be harmful.
That conclusion is doubtful ALI
thought and felt the same way last
year. but we had a remarkably heavy
vote. and the plurality and majority
fairly scared beyond precedent.
The journals probably judge by the
towns. The country always votes bet
ter than the cities. Farmers have the
civic sense more fully developed than
town folks. 1t is easy, however, to get
out the city vote-not so easy to corral
the rural voters. who are scattered and
far from the polls. But few hustlers
and teams at each precinct can round
'em up. !. We don't believe republic
cans, having such good tickets, state,
congressional, judicial and countN are
going to stay at home on election day,
and jeopardize them. They are going
to see to 1t that every man on all the
tickets is elected. Who doubts this
You? Well, you are not going to stay
at home, are you? No. You'll be right
on hand, and wouldn't miss it for any
thing.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1902-10-23
TOO MANY NEWSPAPERS.

Commenting upon a situation Well
known to newspaper men in Iowa the
Davenport Republican says of Daven-
port as q field:
There are more newspapers here
than in many cities of several hundred
thousand inhabitants. None OF them
are getting rich and some of them are
finding the shedding very difficult in
spite OF the blare and bombast of all
sorts OF premium schemes and con-
tests. TO make successful newspaper
there must first be field. That is
where some of the papers of Davenport
find something lacking. They are
striving to make both ends meet where
there is no field"
Just now there is not a place in the
entire west so ovcrWorked by newspa-
pers as is Davenport and there is not
another place in the west where the
piano contest, trip to Europe, baby
show, etc, schemes arc worked in
newspapers as they are in Davenport.
What the Republican says is true.
Davenport has too many newspapers.
Some of them should merge. There is
room there for good morning and a
good evening newspaper. with possi-
bly, third one printed in German, but
four American dailies are fully two too
many. Des Moines with four was COM
PEELED TO merge and If appearances can
be depended upon there is yet need for
still another merger, which will leave
che less evening daily there. The
problem Of publishing good newspa-
per today is one of expense fully as
much as one of ability on the part OF
the management. In such fields as
Davenport aud Des Moines feWel
newspapers would result in better ones
as the career of the Sioux City Journal
amply illustrates.