Evening star., 1902-08-30


Some very amusing sights are seen and
many ludicrous things are heard in a court
ROOM remarked prominent young Wash
ington attorney who. for nearly dozen
years. held office assistant clerk of
the Supreme Court of the District of Co.
lumbia. Il recall that on one occasion u
colored man was on trial for larceny, the
allegation being that he had stolen a large
sum of money from the cash drawer in a
laundry conducted by celestial.
The Chinaman from whom the coin had
been purlOned was called to the witness
stand. Right here 1t should be stated that
no matter how well Chinaman may speak
the English language out of court, he either
fergets all he ever knew about it or pre-
tends that he does not understand a word
the moment he enters a temple of justice
THE trial proceeded and the laundryman
related his tale of woe. through the medium
Of an Interpreter. Finally the prosecuting
attorney directed the interpreter to inquire
of the witness If the latter had seen the
prisoner the night the money was removed
from the drawer.
ThereupOn the interpreter said to the wit
ness something that sounded like "Ah kee
mong y ting er, XII yah ah ching an, moy
yah tuUgy
'.,The witness replied: How he NAH tow
shan ting er ki yah yah, mOy sing te ah ah!
'' Him say yes the interpreter announced,
turning to the prosecuting attorney. at the
conclusion of the IOng-drawn-out cOnversa-
tiOn in Chinese The incident caused sup
pressed laughter throughout the court room,
the services of the crier being necessary to
restore order
x X K
There is a member of the detective corps
at police headquarters about whom a story
is related which has afforded amusement to
his brother sleuths. This particular detec-
tive had been detailed on an important mis-
sion. and as it was 80 o'clock in the morn
ing when he returned to headquarters he
thought he would remain over night and
occupy the spare bed in the sleeping room.
He ascended the steps to the third floor as
the elevator had stopped, and few minutes
later he was seen in the office enjoying a
nap on desk.
Whats the matterf' he was asked in
the morning when he appeared at roll call.
showing the effects of not having occupied
a comfortable bed over night.
Nothing at ALL was his answer.
Have YOU been home since yesterday"
Il spent the night a DESK said the
sleepy detective, who realized his superior
probably suspected something wrong,
why didn't you occupy the spare bed?"
Spare bed?' echoed the detective. There
was no spare bed in the room. 1 went up
there. but there was no room for me"
right to occupy one bed because he was on
duty was called upon to explain why both
beds had been occupied the night before.
only one of them was occupied he
state.
But" said his superior, Mr.. says
to the contrary"
Cant help it," he said. ST occupied one
bed and had my clothes laid out on the
'.And he's detective" was his conclud-
ing remark.
The act of Transforming a foreigner into
a full-fledged American citizen was recent
ly accomplished by Justice CIabaugh of the
Supreme Court of the District of Columbia,
In what was probably the shortest time on
record. The applicant for naturalization
was a young fellow of manly appearance.
One sleeve of his coat was empty. 1t re-
quired only a few words Of explanation,
showing that the applicant had lost his
arm as the result OF fighting for the United
States in the Philippines, and the produc-
tion of an honorable discharge from Uncle
Sans army, to cause Justice Clabaugh to
pass the necessary order.
X
The mimic war which Is to be waged be-
tween the army and navy on the New Eng
land coast will bring into use methods and
appliances which, although familiar, sound
strange TO be connected with warfare" This
was the musing remark of an army officer
the other day as he read over the long list
OF rules which are to govern the joint ma
neuvers
For instance, the officers Of the army are
u be transported from one fort to another
as the operations of the navy may dictate,
in automobiles. The hard New England
roads make il possible for these machines
To be used with greater expedition than any
other mode Of conveyance. and the unusual
sight Of men rushing to war in horseless
carriages will undoubtedly be witnessed by
the New England farmer and fisherman as
they pursue the even tenor Of their way.
Another innovation Will be the use of
couple OF seagoing tugs equipped with wire
less telegraph apparatus, to be used by the
army TO flash the news to the forts Of the
approach of the hostile feet. The tugs
will be sent off shore some fifteen or twenty
miles, and the signal which they will give
before scudding from the enemy IS expected
to be of great preparatory benefit to the
forts In training their guns. Other modern
appliances will also be heard of in the re-
ports Of the engagements, and modern war
fare Will go on record as progressing"
K x
DIR. w. T. Harris. commissioner Of educa-
ton. IS believer In the adage concerning
the virtues that follow those who are early
- bed and early to rise" Few men do
more Of their work before the usual office
hours II the government employe than DR.
Harris. For years he has made a practice
or retiring at very early hour-in fact. at
the twilight hour when the proverbial
chicken has been hopping to it's perch to
rOnSt for the night the commissioner of
education seeks his bed room He believes
that the most refreshing sleep comes to man
during the early hours of darkness and 1t
Is then that he enjoys his rest most He
rises al 2 or o'clock in the morning. The
dawn never finds him IN bed and aslecp He
Is up by gaslight, and as soon as he has
dressed his days work begins. Some of his
pest work has been performed during these
early hours OF the morning. When he
reaches the bureau OF education about the
time the clerks there are reporting for duty
ne has usually performed as many hours