The Savannah morning news., 1902-07-07
UNCLE MINGo ON RoBBERS:s.

o1rncle," said the waiter, 'wot does
coil tink OBJ all desc hopup an rob-
h.rv business wot been goin' on here?"
Well" said Uncle Mingo, its jis'
rva I tell you befo'; if all de people
would only stop eatin' beef, like me,
dew would mighty soon git de price
down like wot it been befo'."
You don't unnerstan," said the
waiter: Use talkin' bout de Robin
ob houses, an holm people UP in de
street"
rs dat so?" said Uncle Mingo: IT
o,as taIkin' bout de Robin an horup
cen de meat shops. Well, it's very
much de same ting. De judge he tell
de iury dat de trouble come from de
stallers an de grocers. 'Cose, de judge
he is a VERY wise man, but tlnk
DO trouble come mo from de butchers
dan de grocers
DE grocers say 'twasn't dem," said
the waiter; "dey say dey couIont guy
meat no cheaper"
~ don't know nothin bout dat"
aaid Uncle Mingo but I'll tell you wot
bappen las spring vile ebblebody was
talkin' bout beef bein' so sca'ce an
so high Me an some O. my friens
had altogedder bout dozen head
nice fat beef cattle out to Postum
Holler' an we lowed dat was a me
chance to sell 'em cen town. We lowed
IN make all kin O money, 'nough,
mavbe. to buy a 'scursion ticket to de
CHARLESTON Exposition. So came
down an see two or tree OBJ de DIG
butchers. an 1 ak 'em wot dey Woulo
raw for de lot O. prime cattle, KILL
dress and deliber cen Savannah cen
fus' class condition. Dey all say six
cent a poun' was de bes' dey could
do"
Did you sell at dat?" inquired the
waiter.
MI disperandum," answered Uncle
Ningo. witch bein' interpreted means
nothin' dom. No, sab. We could sell
out dere, sabe de freight an sell EN-
for mo- dan dat, an yet cheaper Dan
de people could buy wife meat. De
bes' way is for ebblebody to eat veg
etables, or else do like dat w-marrleu
vonne iadv I hear bout once. Beef was
high.Sso she SEN de gal 'roun' to de
Ubery stable to git some iber for break
fas'"
well" remarked the waiter, 'if you
kin succeed cen gittin' people to stop
eatin' meat, de cattle will hoP a meet
In and pass you vote OBJ tanks.
Not much" said Uncle Mingo, Il
don I look TOT no preCldlloH' W. ocT>~
half de work does, l don't git no pay,
an if de animals had sense. dey
wouldn't hab no mo- gratitude dan de
mems.
Dat put me cen min OBJ a story [
hear over bout a good ole purfesser.
He was strollin' troo a ole fiel' one
ebenin' gedderfn' verbs, witch he was
carrying cen a big red Handkerchief. He
come up to a bull; de bull he spy de
red hankercher, switch his tail, an glib
a snort
Dear me- say de purfesser. I
seems to hab attracted de 'tention OBJ
CAT animal
De bull paw de groun; put down his
head, an heller.
We'll I declared say de perfesser,
he really look angry bout sump'n.
Prehaps it would be de case o. pru-
dence for me to git a little mo- closer
to de fence
But de bull amt glib him no time
to go to no fence. He glib big beller
an come full tilt, head down at de
red hankercher. Lucky for de perfesser,
dere was a little simmon tree close by,
an he jis had time to git to it an
shin up like a boy OBJ fo'teen. De bull
ne look up at de perfesser cen de tree,
an dance roun', PAWN an bellerin' an
foamin' at de mout'
De perfesser couldn't say a word
for good vile. At las he git his win,
an den he shake his ifs at de bull.
You outdacious rascal he say
you ongrateful animal! To ack cen
slch way like dis to me, after 1 has
dcne gone an been a vegetarian for
mo dan twenty years."