West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1902-10-23
Mr.. BOWSEgS COLLAPSE.
What Happened Before asd Afssr the
Unexpected Arrival Of Mis- Mother.
in.LAw.

| ser mansion and when he himself arrived al
the usual hour Mrs. Bowser could not fail tc
note the cuisines promptly done here" ex.
preston on his face. According to her es.
tablished rule she made no inquiries to
in,errup, the harmony OF dinner but when
the meal was over she carelessly queried
"Did you send up all those things ihis
afternoon or did the man make mistakep''
II sent up some lime. varnish, wall paper
disinfectsn, and moth destroyer" he re-
piled.
"Bu, what on earth do We want with
those things,'
"Mr. Bowser do you know what season
of the year this iss"
''It is spring of course"
al am glad TO find that you can tell the
difference between spring and fall. We
have jus, emerged from long hard winter.
For four OF FIVE months the moths and germ,
and microbes have been allowed to thrive
and multiply without let or hindrance aad
At the present moment our hosse nust con-
tain millions" +"
will give you all my pin money for q month -
she spii,ediy replied at the reflection on her
| neainess Is a housekeeper.
"As l was saying" he went on vitho.,
needing her 'there are millions and millions
OF moths, germs and microbes. There are
bushels of dust. The whtewssh of isst
year has los, ITS strength. It's wonder
ths; ~e have not smallpox. typhoid fever.
tuberculosis aud other diseases but Provi-
denee seems TO have been with US. W. cen
take no further chances however. Pr.,i-
dence has got TO be backed up. Unless a
promp, move is made in the matter there wili
be double funeral in the house"
''What do you mes n by prompt sover"
~ shall remain at home Tomorrow. I
shall rip up the microbe infested carpets
fling the germ laden rug, out of ,he window
renew the whi,ewsshing aud do little var
nishing ot woodwork. The next day
may"
''Bat have done my spring house clean.
ing" interrupted Mrs Bowser as she began
to grow pale faced
"You have had carpet up and q woman
has come in and dwadled around for day
with broom and dust rag" he replied.
''in other words you have simply stirred up
things and made them worse. Right a, this
moment as you stand there you are no
doubt inhsiing thousands of disease germs
with every breath. Look st that cat! Mil
lions ~ mic,obes haze .u.rk-d ~. ~;,.t l..
while you are denying the existence OF onel''
The cat hsd.been sitting up with a cooked
eye but all of a sudden had fallen over and
rested on her back with her legs in the air
and every leg was twi,ching.
''She often does that" explained Mu
Bowser. "Its her way Vt laughing"
"Oh il isl She sees something to laugh
al does she' Well she'll he planted in the
back ysrd within i~o days il we don't dis
infee, this house. propose TO go att at
once. woke up this morning with a
strange feeling all over me and that's VAIN.
ing enough"
''But / don't want any Of those smells
around" she protested. "Whst allied you
was S"'hk ~" VHions anu ncifiDRs ocIofc
you went 10 bed last night. told you
they'd give you heartburn and nightmare
The doctor dropped IN yesterday and he
didn't say anything about germs and
microbes II the house needed to lie furni-
gated or disinfeeted he'd have said So"
= That shows all you know about doctors
He spotted the situation the instant he
stepped inside the door and he knew that
II meant hundreds OF dollars In his pocket
II he kept quiet. l shall dissppoint hin.
however. When have finished with this
house II will be sweet and pure asa tent
on mountain top. WIFI now take the
lime down cellar and slack II for use IN the
morning and then will proceed TO disin-
feet"
Mrs Bowser realized that IL would be
useless TO protest further and she went up.
stairs to hide her tears while Mr. Bowser
disappeared down cellar. He finished
with his lime In about half an hour and
then brought up gallon jug containing q
liquid disinfectsnt. This he carefully
poured around the edges OF the sitting
room carpet and the FIRST smell sent the
cat cantefing upstairs
mo cologne about that" he mused as
he shifted and snuffed. but IL must be
sure death TO microbes. That cat must
come In for soaking before I get through
There's no doubt that cats carry germs
around in their fur +"
When the sitting room had been hn'shed
he decided that the parlor carpet ought TO
come 10. He had ripped IL up across one
end Of the room and was bravely at work
when the doorbelI rang. As the cook was
out and Mrs Howser upstairs he answered
IT, lie opened the door TO find familiar
hgare on the steps. II there had been
any doubt about Il her greeting would have
dispelled tho Illusion.
"Phcwi But what on esrth Is that
SMELLY she exclaimed ss she walked In
"I'Il bet YOU have been up TO some Of ,our
tomfool nonsense again. Lord but skunks
amt IN Il with this smclii"
Pm disinfeeting little" humbiy re.
piled Mr. Bowscr
"Oh you sreS Well I'll attend 20 your
case in minute Where's NARY oh
there she is Mary I've come to make you
a visit OF four weeks"
MIR Bowser went way back to the FAR
tbest end OF the sitting room and sat down
and even when the cat walked TO and fro
in front Of him and gasped and gurgied he
didn't dare Jump AT her. The mother In.
law came down stairs after removing her
things and after looking sroung two or
three minutes she stood with her hands on
her hips and nodded her head and said
Il thought IL was about time for one OF
i L. -. 4.
time What's In that jug'"