BoletiÌn mercantil de Puerto Rico. (San Juan, P.R.) 18??-1918, 1902-06-02
SArIJUAN. JUNO 2
The truth Is Not IN Him.
What the Press Agent Would Like
to Get the Papers to Print
If He Could

1T he OOUlU
The press agent has become of late
wears so familiar to the public that
most intelligent persons know in ge-
neral way who he is and what he does.
He is a necessary institution OF the Pc
Rod, and he clearly has his place In
mod dern civilization In these columns
from time to time tribute has been paid
TO his usefulness and to his sterling
qualities, and sorrow has been express
sed for his faults. Now, though the
public knows something OF what the
press agent should sand between the
directors of enterprises and the news
paper man st2nds between the press
agent and the public.
1t is the purpose OF this article to
consider only one class of press agent,
the theatrical, and to disclose some OF
the secrets of the prison house. 1t is
the purpose to lay bare his monstrous,
his hideous, his conscienceless, his colos.
sal mendacity. 1t has been suggested
that it would amuse the readers OF the
paper if some Sunday, instead of prlrt-
ing the usually carefully prepared CO
1umn of theatrical notes, it should print
fully and accurately just what the press
agents send in to be printed. There
has never been a time, however, Wien
tie paper had page and half to
spare for that purpose, and it would
take about that. Instead of this there
& will be offered here few samples ol
the efforts of the press agents to get
the paper to say things, chosen as typl
cal from examples covering a conslde
rab1e period In most cases the attempt
will be made to conceal the identity OF
the theatres and plays, as some OF the
press agents have now taken up otheA
occupations and are trying to lead bet
ter lives. 1t should be said, too, that
many times the press agent knowns
better all the time, but manager who
does not know better insists on his
sending to the papers fuisome boasts
which no self-respecting paper would
think of printing. Even the will to
lie is the managers and the skill to lie
is the press agents.
At the time of the marriage of Miss
Vanderbilt to the Duke of Marlborough
there was a play in town which he'd a
ballroom scene, ard the press agent
desired the pa pers to say that the scene
cost as much as the Vanderbilt wedding.
1t was nooody's business what the
wedding cost, but it was variously es-
timated at from $4,000 to $75oooo
The production of the play in question,
ballroom scene and all may have cost
$4,000 and that is a very expensive
play
"And hereis truly touching bit:
Signorina--, the Spanish prirna
donna mezzosoprano, who will sing at
the Madison Square Garden concert
next Sunday evening, is remark ably
beautiful woman Her voice first at
tracted the attention of Milan profes-
sor, who made its perfection th9 study
of his life When the signorina fitted
away from him to fame and fortune it
is said that he slowly pined away. Yet
he never breathed a word of love to
her in his life. The gifted singer is
said to keep his death mask among her
mementos She has a peculiarly haunt
ing voice and marked individuality
1t may be remarked that the singer
for whom the poor Milan professor thus
pined away never was heard of before,
never has been heard of since, and
never ought to have been heard of at
all. The question suggests itself, if the
professor made the perfection of her
voice the study of his life, how old
must she have been when he got
through Here was press agent with
a turn for keen observation and philos-
ophizing:
It is interesting to watch the audience
in theatres where farces are being per
formed For instance, take"- - =
which is one of the funniest pieces ever
seen here Every night different
audience will roar at precisely the
same lines, and usually the same lines
viii arouse exactly the same amonnt Of
laughter This gees to show thai the
laws of humor are fixed, and that 4
farce to be successful must be as car
efully and scientifically written as the
best tragedy in blank verse
The joke Of this was that TIE farce
in question was one of the worst ever
seen, and closed in about two weeks,
the managers having lost whatever
they put into it.
One of the tricks of the trade is an
appeal to the love of mystery The
press agent wishes the newspaper
convey 10 its readers that it is using
sl1perhuman efforts to find out what the
coming play IS about, but "a vain. FoE