The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1902-08-03
FUN OF THE WORLD.


Secretary Shaw has received request from an Oid
neighbor his homo letter OF Recommended
tcn which can be by the friend procuring more
lucrative employment one particularly
lights the Secretary out Iowa. where both
known. OF course such letter would have
weight" The recommendation It IS perhaps needless
to say will be promptly forthcoming.
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A gentleman in London called the celebrated
EDITOR of well newspaper. said yoar
paper has announced dead IF S in our
paper replied the editor. But 1t
for. you see, I am alive We'll then it
cannot be helped" But I expect you this
misstatenaent" said the gentleman The editor
swered: i cannot do that FOR recall what
paper. I WILL however. do everything TO
bring you life Tomorrow Will place
in the list of births
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When william jennings Bryan visited Milwaukee dur
ing his stunping Of 1895 the omnpresent Andrew
Jackson introduced 10 him. Mr. Bryan. said
the Chairman of the committee desire introduce
sir Mr.. Amos Jones, o city. who cast his first
Andrew Jackson. has voted the Democrats
election since then and intends
sir. the third day or NOVEMBER next
Mr. Bryan Mr.. Jones: Mr.. Jones' Mr.. Bryan Tn
glad you. Jones' said the candidate Glad
10 YOU" responded MI Jones; and then. with his
hand behind his ear; What please7 It is said
that Bryan saw the OF the situation while the
committeeman thrown into state Of constsrns-
ton.
&c gs
A certain naval officer, noted among his friends and
colleagues humptous egotsm. has old nanny
cook. who brought in her masters family and
understands his idiosyncrases. Lately the ice
left his house has not been up 10 the standard ana
Mary Jane complained the who delivered 1t.
ing that Gearge' would not have such ice and
there improvement We'll. nanny" replied
the ieemsn. Il don't know what TO do about 1t. God
Almighty the and the ice God Almighty makes
ought good enough for anybody" Yes. honey"
replied the old nesress yes honey lee de Lord
good fur anybody Leastwisc it's good 'nuf fur
n IT'S 'nuffu n
lie good fur de childun. but Mars Gsarse won't
it's good nuf fur Mars Gearss"
aE q &c
Anecdotes of the elder Dumas abound at the present
moment the celebration the OF his birth
having led TO general search "reminiscences The
following very characteristic OF the great writer;
Dumas. Is well known, often in financial difncui
ties we'll acquainted with the and methods
Of bairs one day person called upon him and
asked him subscribe 20 toward the
of burying bain. Twenty francs to bury baiiir?'
quoth Dumas. We'll, I'm not in funds Just now. but
here's 40 francs Go and bury a couple
x &c
The late DR. Talmage once called his lawyer ana
found his parishioners there legal business
of private nature All Doctor"' called the lawyer
in greeting. Good morningi Hero are two of your
flock May I ask without impertirencs II regard
them as sheep whiteg' II don't know yet
replied TalInage dryly whether they're black white
I'm very certain that. IL they remain here long,
they'll be neeced-"
Egg &c
Forgive him. exclaimed the great orator. mo,
sir. are things that never for
give. If ordinary quarrel could forgive
him; If had had stand-up and knock-down fight
could forgive him. slandered might forget
it. some things cannot forgive. however hard
he may try
Did you have political argument with hin17'
the great politician
mo: we both the side
Both fan in love siri7' inquired the
young lover
no: he never knew the girl married
Tried the better OF you by underhand means
in business transaction possibly" suggested the
business
Not So I never had any business dealings with him.
I'll tell you what 1t was though I making speech
one night-it effort OF my nfe-and he
present. I had worked in heroics and had como
pathos. I carried the audience with
told little story had interpolatsd to Illus
the point I making. There hardly a
sound in the vast auditorium. could see that the
people hanging word every syllable that
l uttered. AT that moment-the very moment OF my
triumph"
well asked others together he hesitsted.
AT that this yelled louder"
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"a characteristic incident salisburys attitude
towards temperance relate by correspondent One
the clergy neighborhood OF Hatfield. who
enthusiastic advocate Of Veto day tried
to awake hts noble neighbor to the Importance
the liquor question Lord Salisbury listened with his
usual courtesy but the clergyman that
made no impression.
undue multiplication or public a place
an inducerent 10 excessive drinking
Really" said Lord Salisbury Il extremely sorry
appear $ unsympathetc. / cannot admit
that this house-Hatheld-theTe forty bedrooms.
but feel inclined go sleep here than
anywhere else"
z
The only time Justice Gray OF tho United States su
pTeme court known 20 make joke while
seated the bench day when Judson Harmon.
then Acknowledgement was arguing case before him
Mr. Harmon had occasion display a map quite
one and he referred Il bird s-eys view
The justice could barely II from the bench and
after peering for Mr. Attorney
General. regret tel you that I bird
Heredity and Genius.
Crrom the Baltimore SUM-
Expeditions the OF heTedity far IN aforcing