The Lewiston teller. (Lewiston, Idaho) 1900-1905, 1902-08-21
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NeL- W nat hWinI taDie manners ~
has. think | shall cut him. Belle
II he continues 10 eat with his knit,
he will probably cut himself.
Beware" said the fortune teller. 80,
a tall. dark man" You are trying tc
black male me-" faitered the fall
young maid-Chicago Tribune.
Excited Wife-Wake up. Henry, The
house Is on fire Sleepy Husband
Great heavens. Now well have to
move agaIn.-Ohlo State Journal
Wigg-That pretty girl next door
screcches to beat the band. l thought
you said she sung beautifully. Wagg-
No; said she was a beautiful singer"
College Idiot dndefinitely)--It doesn't
necessarily follow. Kind Friend-What
doesn't! College ldiot-Why, n dog
when you whistle for it.-Columbia
Jester.
The Difference: What Is the differ.
ence between sewing machine and 4
KISS! One sews seams nice and the
other seems SO nice.-Quips and
Cranks.
Thick: BrIggs-The electric light has
gone out on the other side of the hotel
piazza. Griggs-Yes. l had to elbow
my way through the lovers there Just
now.-Life.
Reformers: ''Some er de loudes' talk
In reformers," said Uncle Eben.
'makes me think Of bald headed man
Eoin' 'ronn' sellin' hair restorer."-
Washington Star.
Bertha-And 10 Edith has made IN
with Fred! How did 1t happen? Con-
stahce-oh, you see. II was the only
way in which she could have another
quarrel with him.
so he has written good play at
last" "Oh, no: it's very commonplace.
What! It's one Of the most success
tul OF the season." (which proves ex.
actly what say"
Hojack-Herc's an account OF how .
man wrote love letter and got into
trouble by It. Tomdik-I can sympa.
thize with that fellow. That's how l
ssspi'~n-d 10 get married.
Nellie wrote lovely poem to Mn.
bel. Belief know. but she got mad
and tore II up. Nell-The idea. Why1
beile-He headed II Lines on Nabel's
Face. '-Philadelphla Record.
Fiaywright-From the nature of nv
play you see II ought to close with
some line or significant act from the
nero In perfect accord with the feel.
1ngs OF the audience. Critic-Why not
let him hease a sigh Of relief. then?
Instructor-I.ord Byron said that Mn.
caulay woke up one morning aud found
himself famous. What great character
IN American literature Is parable, to
this! Student twho had been doing,
KIP Van Princeton Tiger.
AT the marriage OF an Albany widow.
er one OF the servants was asked il his |
master would take a bridal tour
"Dnnno, sab; when old m.ssus's alive
he took q paddle to her: dunno IL he
takes q bride to the new one or not.
The President-Then you don't care
20 nave your name mentioned In con. |
nection with your one hundred million |
dollar gift to our university? The Phi.
1anthropist-Well. you might saw thai
you give my name without my con
sent.
Little Augusta was at the window.
oh. come quick. or you won't see ~"
she called excitedly. Hes running
away" "What Is II. deary" asked her
mother. why. there's a horse going
down the street with nothing ON but
his tail"
A Very Good Days Work: Weary
Willle--I jes' put In good DAYS WORK
In thirty minutes. Prayed Fagin-Ex.
plain yerself. Weary Willle-welI
put IN six pies. pan NV doughnuts, an
you. jars NV preserves. OATS a good
days work fer any woman.-Judge.
Cupid's Benefit: Celia-Oh, we had
. delightful time ut Ophelia's an.
nouncement party. Delia-What did
you dos Celia-Shc had us submit,
sealed Euesses as to the man she !.
engaged to: the girl who guessed right
. to be maid Of honor. Detroit Free
Press.
An Oversight-The employee Of the
gaA company was excited. "what,s
the matterY" asked the superintendent
i've just found a street that hasn't
been torn up for nearly ten years"
was the reply. "send gang OF men
out there Mt once" ordered the super.
observation-disclosures Evening Post.
There Is only one reason. he said :
why l have never asked you to be NV ,
Eife." "What is that?" she asked ~ ,
AVE always been half afraid vop
night refuse Well" she whispered
after long silence II should think .