Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1902-12-13

{ ItSt.
she seems to have lost her head over
] that young man. Yes, / saw il ON
! his shoulder. Philadelphia Evening
, Bulletin.
Largely Supplied-"Are you man
! of family, sir!" Yes sir; my third
son-in-law moves in to-day" Detroit
Free Press.
Pat-"An' so ye shtruck fer shorte~
, hours? ?" Mile-"Yis We want each
wan to consist ay forty minutes, be-
gorry"'-Puck
Just in Time-"Wds your last book
4 success?" oh, immense. The pub
fishers sent the entire edition up to my
house just as we ran out Of coal"-Ex-
! change.
! First NJ. DIV hat a lot Of things
have been found in the yermiform APP
/ pendlx" Second NJ. D.-"And look at
/ the money that has been taken out Of
/ LITTLE
Mrs. Dcarboru-"They tell me your
cook is an angel" Mrs. Wabash--'T
! reckon she is. She tried to light the fire
with kerosene this morning. Yonlers
| Statesman.
A High Testimonial-Lady engaging
| n maid)--"Was your last mistress sat
ishcd with you:' Maid-"Well, mum.
she said she was very pleased when
eft."-Punch.
Farmer-"See here, boy! What are
yo doing up that apple tree?' Mid
Cant yer see nothin? One of yer APP
Piles fell Off de tree, an I'm tying it on
againr'-Brooklyn Life.
Mrs, Watts Trumps-"Oh, yes. We
had Il delightful time. We played cards
the whole evening Mr.. Watts Trunpa
-"Nonsense, Lucy! We only played be
tween anecdotes, Puck
Literary Tastc.--Cookie- Don't grt
the pork sausascs at Browns, Marys
get them at Smithsons. They DO wrap
them up in such beautiful love tales.
YOU can't think,"-Tit-Bits.
What Doughnut Is.-"A doughnut,
children said the practical teacher OF
digestive economies is round hole
in the center Of a compound mixture of
dyspepsia. Baltimore News.
Lecturer-"And what mnG is most
apt 10 reach that elevation whence The
earth may he viewed AS one yaxt
plainY" Voice lin the audience "Ifhe
one that works ia powder mill
Life.
Manufacturing eyidence.--"Fm sorry
to have to mess. your face so, kitty"
said Tommy, as he daubcd pussys face
with jam, but can't have folks sus-
pecting me."--Columbus (O) State
Journal
The Parting Shot.-Clar1 latter n tins
- presume you would like your ring
back| Gcorge-"Neyer mind; keep
it. No other girl know could use that
ring, unless she wore Il on her thumb
--Tit-Bhs.
Nothing Lacking Customer (cmerg-
ing from burgain-counter crnsh)--
Help! My leg is hrokcnp FlOorwalk-
er-"You will find the crutch depart
ment. sir. on the fourth floor in the
rear. '-~rit-Rits.
Scientific and Nervous Visitor tat
country hoteD--"I suppose there's nS
! ptomalne' in this pie?" Waiter (qnite
equal to the occasion) sir We
never puts that In unless specially Or-
dercdw-Punch
She Tried" Bridget" inquired the
| mistress of the house, were you enter
tanning policeman in the kitchen last
| nlghtf" Sure, num-" replied the cook
lady, an it's fer him T. say how inter
! tainin' OF was. Oi was dom me bist"
Philadelphia Bulletin.
Remember, Pat, it is the hand thai
| rocks the cradle that rules a nation"
well, begorra yez may be rolght, but
| Orm fer thinkin' mesllf, it's the cart
| we've got before Their boss; 'ut's ther
hand as cradles Their rocks phwot rules
| or nation. Exchange
aywright-"You'd better say few
| Kind words to the star before the per-
| Torrance. She seems dispirited." Man
| agcr-"In what way" Playwright
| We'll she says there are moments
when even she doubts that she ia the
greatest actress IN the world. ~ Brook
! Ign Life.
Heartless Felow.--W ife-"Be sure to
advertise FOR fido in the morning news
papers" Next day the wife read az
follows in the newspapers; Lost, a
NANCY lapdog, with one eye and no tail.
Too fat to walk. Answers to the name
OF Fido. If returned stuffed, 70 re-
ward ."-Th-Bits.
Vanity Of Yanites Our Amatenr
Romeo (who Las taken a cottage in the
country, 50 as to be able to study with
out Interruption" Arise. fair sun, and
Kill the cnvious noon" Owner OF
| Rubicund Countcnance popping head
over the hedgc)-"Bcg pardon EUR Be
you a talkin' to OF, sur?"-London
/ Punch.