New-York tribune., 1902-10-31
THE Talk or The DAY.

English tvutem Tells The follow tug good
staf, of muscular Christianity In smoking room
or hotel I'm Dublin where sat huge priest some
men were soothing stupidIy about miracles p
the priest and offered 70 perform miracle. lie
seized the most blatant ot the scoTsrs carried him
70 the door snd kicked him into the street. When
the unhappy youth returned the priest asked. An
did We break your back = did not the
answer well it's miracle We didn't" answered
the priest
The Bran.H How DID q, YOU come 10 select onye
Wen YOU see my wifes father objected to our
marriage. ana when the little one came he forgHve
lei her have praper ,rSdii "GChlcaeo Rscor'i- ;s
Herald
l. his the nr~t appearance OF the following Ii
il from The London Times OF October "a lSoz
One ot the Dover innkeeprrs. who lately complained
80 a French gentleman thnt his house greatly
infested with rats ad that he would willingly give
considerable sum 10 get rid or them, on the
following morning Bud after the Frsnchman had
received his bIlh accost-d by him: sure / shall
tel YOU ycE way you shall get rid OF de rat" Il
viii be obliged very much To you. II you can re-
piled the landlord Vel. den. only charge de rat
you charge and + viIj ae id n lie raj ever
come 10 your house again
Kin any one make m"liore" askel on~ Of rhe
the meeting a. he laid his revoIvrrs o the table
OWN TO the general custom Of wesrin, weapons
tion.'-tPhila delphis Record
a a
Berlin lady who was sent by her physician to one
OF the well known cures In Germany He gave
her a letter which purpotted TO be a prescription
FOR her treatment there. and ch she presented
10 the doctor at the cure" 1t read follows:
'Rup fens. iediecs y. : ord sut H. chlhrlst
uixzi chen. sieihra berdi efed ernetn eel naus
h Ian gsamda mi. Soihr gat tez weImo
uateru. hchatuu. dervi ellie. icht. ges und ct
Eersta-N. u. r. y" The doctor perused the
lines again ana that the letters when put IN
rN..f
die Cans ordenuich hr ist nix. Ziehen sic ihr
aber die Federu eInzeln aus sehr Iangsam damlt
hr gatte zwei Monate Ruhe hat und er yiel-IeCh
g~sundet Nerstanden?' In English these words
mean Pluck the Old goose thoroughly we'll
There j. nothing the matter with her But pull
out the feathers one 10y one. very slowly 50 that
her husband may have couple Of months rest
by which means he max perhaps he restored 10
health DO you under stand
The doctor shook his head dubiously over her.
and ordered months "f the usual exrrcIs.
baths waters. and rest
DANNY rOAL-HEAVER
with apologies to MI Kiplingi
What are the people bowling for e' the gentle
For anthracite, Foo anthracite" the papers all
What ais them an What ails them au2. the
gentle reader cried.
Their fuels out, Iheir fuels OUT" the papers all
Hard coal is thirty piunks ton. aud soft is
Ana cookinss done with kndnns wood. and gas.
and kerosene
And when the frost comes. then you're going to
what il will mea S
To have cCal STRIKE last until November"
What's that that's black agn the sky the gen
tie reader cried.
ITS soft coal smoke It's coal thu
papers all replied
1t. makes cough! It soils nv shirt tba can
tie reader cried 80
IT sky high for all lis dirt ths ~. mars
all piled f~P
il from Wales.
II falls 'f 20
The empty eoal-hcds just bad as empty din
ner pals.
This nasty coal strikes something to remem-
beT' ~ ~
tie reader cried ~
all replied. '"P
How came il came tba oa,tIa
reader crted
" Twas meuded In the White House str tho
papers all replied
For a skilful operation brought the ouarators 10
And 1udicious mediation changed the strikers
point OF view.
And Board OF Arbitration is to see the saushbls
through 80 9'N''''e
And .wen have cheap coal again before Novsm.
-tHarres's wsskly