The Savannah morning news. (Savannah, Ga.) 1900-current, 1902-04-13
WOMAN'S
WORLD.

lime says Dorothy Dix in the
hl'"' or,eans Picayune. for forlorn
,,.t,s child whom a good woman STEP
- was honestly endeavoring TO
no'l.N IN nroperly. People always raise
stenchiIdren much more aceu-
u than they do their own. They
I"'' II their theories off on them, and
1--we seen quiet, little stepchildren
! 10 we're drilled and trained like SOL
who always ate just what was
IA for their little tummies, and never
80 allowed to sit up at nights, and
w. oct dirty and messy like other
sndren. and everybody said what a
'D D5 mart their stepmother was doing
for them.
But by and by. if you got to know
.,oso children well, you saw that they
'.ro very old, and that they had queer,
sobiIdish ways of hiding their trou-
,1,s and when you noted, as their lips
,.r,,n N tremble, that instead of fly
10 70 sheltering arms and weeping
.,oir little woes out on a womans
least they went off alone, you knew
.be whole story of discipline and re-
WESTON and tyranny that worked it.
IN ont upon these hapless and help
less little ones.
Many boy escapes from such
home to the freedom of the street and
he society of wild companions; many
rirl literally jumps from the frying
nan into the fire by marrying the first
man who asks her, whether she loves
him or not. or he is suitable or not,
inst TO get away from her stepmother.
Many man and woman, looking back
mon their starved childhood, without
live. without sympathy, without COM
nrehension, knows it warped their ma
ures and robbed them of that which
life can never restore.
If there is pity for the child, however,
there should also be pity for the wo-
man The task of 4 the stepmother is
one of the hardest and most thankless
on earth. Ones own children are sell
dom appreciable of the sacrifices a
mother makes for them, and the STEP
child is still less grateful for care it
does not even understand.
We are all fond of talking of chill
dren as little angels who go about diff
fusng radiance and light and joy. The
truth is that from the time one is born
II IS d never WITTY anu care.
There are collie, and measles, and
teething, and whooping cough, and
tears, and dirt, and noise, and a million
other juvenile Affections to be borne
with and in nothing else is almighty
wisdom more signally displayed than
in the fact that when God sends a
woman baby he gives her the grace
to endure the trouble it brings.
But when woman takes upon her
self vicarious motherhood heaven
works no miracle in her behalf. She
Is flying in the face of Providence, and
it leaves her to work out her own sal
walton. Just how hard her position
is We do not sufficiently appreciate, for
hers is the portion of labor, without
the love that sweetens it. She must
bear with the faults of children with
out the mother tenderness that binds
her to them; she must sacrifice herself
without the affection that makes self
abnegation a joy, and being only hui
man, it is no wonder she often falls
short in her duty.
There is also-another reason for her
failure-the ineradicable animosity that
the child feels for the woman who
takes his mothers place, and the bit
ter jealousy that almost every second
wife feels toward the first and toward
her children. In her affections. the
best woman in the world is selfish. If
She loves her husband, it is a matter
Of life and death with her to be first
in his heart, and there is but one per-
son she will share\ it with, and that
is her own child.
There isn't a second wife in the
world who would admit this, but it is
true nevertheless. She would be hor-
fifed if anyone would even suggest to
ner that She was trying to wean her
husband away from his first children,
out lnsensibly, insidiously it is being
cone In many and many a home, and
before they know it the elder children
nave been nushed out of the nest.
whenever there are two sets of children
IN family, it is a notorious fact that
Inc younger are almost invariably
more INDUCED, have more money spent
on them, and better advantages given
them than the elder ones received.
When 1t comes to mine and thine, not
one woman in a million can be just Or
even honest.
would not be thought to be ar
raigning stepmothers as a class. The
mere act of maternity does not consti-
luIe being mother in the highest
sense of the word. There are women
whose province in life it is to mother
otner women's children, and there are
sepmothers who are real mothers in
'he noblest acceptation of the term,
ana who give to their husbands chill
uren love and tenderness and an in
splration that the children's own moth
er would have been incapable of. I
hhow Intimately two such women as
InlS who married widowers with half
grown families of boys and girls, and
fNnY1 i
women and whose stepchildren adored
.nein While living and bless their mem
o,eS now that they are dead.
10 NIL the role of stepmother rightly
.aKes a woman of great heart and
s sis mead. She must have tact and
ulpiomacy and wisdom to know when
W weld and when to be firm; the ex-
eCutlVe ability to guide and a patience
udt nothing can exhaust, and above
e OIL mat love without which every
S.ner quality, in dealing with a child,
"rcoIles as sounding brass and tinkling
.. "heh you think of how difficult is
S sne part the stepmother essays, and
nov, now tragical and far-reaching her fail
VIC must be if she does not succeed,
you are filed with twofold wonder.
"sG mat any woman is bold enough
s % attempt it; and, secondly, that men
s Sau so little thought and common
ttSsnse IN the selection of the women
'i Wy, put over their children.
nA w nen man has only his own happi-
az. 10 consider. If he makes a mis-
i'm. 1t IS a misfortune: but if he has
be ' e. Ghlldren he commits a crime IL
tbo aus aus to choose wisely. Yet look at
sta way widowers marry! When they
piaa out counting they always apollo
> 40, Tor it by saying my children need
opt "Q 3iIner' and then they go and pick