Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1902-03-27
A LITTLE GEOLOGY

Ow Clingham there was the study OF
man.. She wasn't saying a word to
any of her friends, but she had decided
to get married again whenever the
right man ca,ne along. The right man
needn't be a millionaire, as h had
considerable money of her own, but
he must have attachments and a name
and be in a position to help her carry
out her social ambitions. When she
first set eyes on Professor Compton, she
was full of ridicule for him. He was
a bachelor forty-ive years old; he was
tall. ~ungainly and absentminded: he
wore his clothes as an Indian wears
his blanket, and his manners were odd
and eccentric. The widow at first
PASSED him over with disdain and con-
tempt. but later on, when she heard
that his works on the formation of the
earth, the drift period, the iron age and
the carboniferous period had given
him a worldwide reputation, b
changed her mind.
There were times when the professor
talked to her chair or over her head and
seemed Oblivious of her presence, and
there were times when he fell over her
train or asked her for a match to light
his cigar, but she excused those trifes
for the sake of genius. In due time
she decided to go in and win. The
professor couldn't be captured by the
usual articles employed by her sex,
but would have to be taken by storm,
as it were. She decided how the storm
was to be worked and set about it.
One day when the widow knew that
the professor had planned to wander
over a certain old field and look for
evidences of the Niagara period she
| out on her hat and got ahead Of him
by half an hour. The professor reach
ed the field to find her up a tree and
an old bull charging up and down and
believing his disappointment. The
| widow was weeping and shouting for
aid. The professor stopped to pick up
and examine a rock which bore IN
doubted evidences of the Chemung
period and her headed for the tree.
At the. same time the bull headed for
him, and 1t was a nip and tuck race.
AS the bull was handicapped by a
sore foot and the loss of n eye he
only got second place-that is, the pro-
lessor was seated on the limb beside
the widow before the old bovine am
bled up to an outcrOp of h Catskills
period and fell over it and came down
on his back like a brick house. Owing
to the widows agitation it was posi-
| lively necessary for the professor to
put his arm around her waist, and to
further soothe and calm her he quietly
observed:
There is no occasion for alarm. We
have simply been pursued by a species
of the genus Dos. Taurus is also n
Of the twelve signs of the zodiac"
But it is terrible, terrible" gasped
the widow az she nestled under his
arm. "You won't leave me to be gOred
to death by the monster, will your
Certainly not. We derive the name
bull from bulle, bolls, bull, bolt, bauli,
bullus, bollis. The name is applied to
the male of any bovine quadruped. I
have not given much attention to the
subject, but | am of the opinion that
the bull made it's first appearance dur
ing the triassic period"
"How nice it is to know so much!'
sighed the widow as she cuddled still
closer.
"Y-e-s," absently replied the profess
or. <
"And how proud your wife would
be of your
Yes, if | had one."
"But why-why"-
"Why don't l have one? My dear
Mrs. Clingham, I have been thinking
that is, l have been wondering-that
Isl
81 am so fiustrated." she gasped as
she pressed her hands to her heart.
LAS l was saying, 1 have been think
ing that If l could find"-
He found it-that is, in shifting about
on the limb he lost his hold, and pro-
fessor and widow swayed backward
and fell to the ground, tenSfeet below,
in chorus. They came down with a
thud and q bump, and the professor
uttered g grunt and the widow a
scream. The bull was standing forty
rods away with a stiff neck and a
lame back, and he didn't care for any
more circus. Nevertheless he lifted
his head and uttered a below, and the
widow made for the fence at one angle
and the professor at another. Both
reached it in due time, but they had
become lost to each other. While the
professor went about scanning the
cliffs along the creek for evidences of
the Hudson period the widow. waded
through the. dry grass and finally
brought up at the hotel. 1t was an
hour after dinner before the professor
appeared. She was seated on the
veranda, and he came up to her with
several specimens of the jurassic pc
riod in his hands and said:
"As | was going to remark several
hours ago, if l could find a woman who
was interested in the study of geology
| should be very glad indeed to devote
on i, 1ua IIA +,~,0 ~ - lo- 49,