The age-herald., 1902-02-19
Washington Dayb by Day

Washington. February 1s-(speciaD- How thou now-how thou!' as we say in comic opera.
 Ishkooda, where the iron ore and the minstrel jokes come from, has been wip- ed out of existence-on the postoffice map of the United States.
 Dynamited Ishkooda has suffered the fate of fair Toadvine. that classic wood land village of the first county of the South, where the original shirtwaist man comes from, to paraphase the description of "Charley's Aunt"
 "Ishkooda is no more. in the Pickwick- ian, postoffce sense. We read in the United States Official Postal Guide, which most admirable publication is fresh ''on our desk'' with the compliments of the Postmaster General, this single fateful line properly dotted:
 1snkooua Blrmlngham.
 Arrah there noow! Begorra. an it is tn post offs department what is annexin' the sooburbs to Brummagem spite O tn haythens what don't want it so at-all- at-all It's Greater Brummagem what Un- cle Sam wants. an faith he ginerally gits what he's ahfter. an no mistake. So tn anty-consolidationers in County Jeffoorson moight as will go way back an sit down quiet laike an behave thim- silves laike gud b'ys.
 Farewill, Ishkooda, farewlll-in tn post offs m aning Miny is tn toime we hoy binn t ye wid visitin' diligits what waant- ed to exploore our maarveous minirul raysoarces whin we waanted t bay some'ers ilse, minirual raysoorces bayin moightly dhry whin felly has thurst long s as yer harm; but it's done ye are now, swate Ishkooda on tn hill what aint a peraty-bed longsaide tn Galtee More an thim ither Galtees in County Clark an County Kerry, though some ither counties waanter claim em!
 And sent to join Ishkooda is Bryan Civilian Jennigs?) in the same county of Jefferson, an likewise Hoy-not ship ahoy, but just plain Hoy, in Madison So has Sportland. Chiffon, which has been swallowed by Jumbo; it having been
 
 any sports there. At the Postofflce De- partment they say there are no sports in all Alabama outside of Birmingham.
 It is painful to note that Talladega has been robbed of both Zuber and Kentuck sweetly-named postoffices: Zuber having been destroyed and Kentuck bodily given to Cleburne, the county bearing the name of that illustrious Irish soldier who died for the South at Franklin
 Alabama at last has Art; but it has lost its Pilot, for that useful guide has been overwhelmed by the rising tide of sloss- Sheffield prosperity in Coronado of Walker, which is soon to have a daily mall all to Itself. President E. O. Hopkins has asked for the daily mall, and not even the United States postoffice depart ment could deny a request from that highly gifted and most charming of men!
 The fame of beautiful Philadelphia, of the dear accent of Mayor Drennen and the fair hills whereon that best of good fellows, Breck Musgrove, was wont in other days to shoot at squirrels with the keen-eyed shotgunner 'Mer'-this fame, be it said, has so filled the land as to arouse envy and that sincerest form of f1attery, imitation; for in the far off county of Lauderdale there has just been established the postoffice of Arkdell!
 That is clearly an infringement of the birthright of the Mayor of Birmingham, and it is understood in the postoffice de- partment that this most famous of all the natives of Philadelphia is about to insti- tute proceedings against the pretentious upstart burg of Lauderdale County which calls Itself Arkdell and that the Mayor Of Birmingham is being backed up by the most noted visitor Philadelphia ever had and best good fellow who ever visited anybody's native place, Hon. Lawrence Breckenridge Musgrove. namely
 By the way, which one of the sixty-six counties of Alabama Is Philadelphia now in? When the latest edition of the official postal guide was made up day before yes terday Philadelphia was in Cullman Coun- ty; but Philadelphia is so fickle and in- constant (unlike the Mayor of Birming- ham ? in her attachments one Is never sure where the fair widow is "at" That is way widows have, the Mayor says. It is in fact a way maidens have, as the Mayors best friend from Walker County and all the rest of us know.