The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1902-01-17
pleased-"Oh, johnson. You know john
son, the inspector Of nuisances !'-Glas-
gov Evening Times.

-:O:-
un &r1nSad W;l;e?;' makes you look so
Willie-'' Cause nobody never calls me
good unless I'm doing something l don't
Some time ago little Walter had occa-
sion to differ with his aunt upon some
Il tell yoS:; said auntie, play fully, Il
know few things
And / know as few things as any
body. | guess said Master Walter, in
8Daddy," asked little Jack, ..where
does !; snak e., begin when he wants to
Mamma (at the breakfast table)-.'You
always ought to use your napkin, Gcor-
.Georgie-"I am usin' it, mamma; I've
got the dog tied to the leg OF the table
with t."-Motherhood.
lis it known whether or not Noah
| coaled at sea:' asked the Bible student.
Ihat is merely a matter Of specula-
ton replied the professor.
In that case replied the student,
would it not be- wise to have the mat
ter Investigated by an inquiry board?"-
Ohio State Journal
The dodo will bite The worm will
! turn.
At one fashionable boarding house Il
Young lady who daily ate hash with the
| other guests acquired reputation for
odd table manners. They were unique
She would haul any dish she fancied up
to her place and eat it. regardless Of the.
ugly glances Of the Others They might
cry out, Help, help. help, OF help want
3D. despairnsly. but they never got it.
| One morning at breakfast her manlnl:.
saw stern look of disapproval on the
man. Mr.. Hightone,'' she began,
Suavt,l y. Il trust you will pardon my
daughters Tad manners
! Bad manners,' exclaimed the in,lig-
llant dude. ''why. she hasn't any manners
at all!-1-ouisville Times.
! French PrnfesSor-"Ah yes. mademoi-
selle. ynn spick re French wizout re least
| accent"
Miss Breczy-"Real kind of you to say
so, but do l leally?"
wizout re least French accent. ''-Phila-
de]Dha Press.
Mrs. Spanker-''1 wish to get house
in a quiet neighborhood
Agent-"YeS, madam; we can accom-
MEDIATE you. I have Il vacant house in Il
street which s as quiet as "A Sabbath
morn all the year round. No barking
dogs, 10 children, no nuisance of any
kind
Mrs. Spanker-''That's exactly what 1
want. How lucky l happened to come
to you! How many rooms has it?''
| Agent-"Ten.''
| Mrs. Spanker-'Thats just right. We
need a good deal Of room. We have nine
l III, L.
back for dog kennel. We keep three
boar hounds. '-Detroit Tribune.
Il always made money off that muSi-
cian, observed the marketman.
| II thought you made money off every
body" said the helpless customer.
well, OF course, l try to, but, you see,
he insists that l give him only four beets
to the measure. '-Baltimore American. =
During one Of Charles Diion's engage.
ments at Belfast, when playing Macbeth
he arrived at the scene when he should
repeat the well-known line:
The devil damn thee black, thou
| creamfacd loon," but no messenger ;,p-
peared before him. Rushing to the wing,
ID Dillon g. sailed out why don't you come
I'm waiting for my cue, sir" replied
You've got it, sir said Dillon.
mo. I've not, not the one Berry Su!!i
van always gives me-
What is that?'
Come on, you ID idiot. life oi
Barry Sullivan.
Doing Him Justice.-The Heire<<-
You seem to have no objection to him.
papa, except that he has 10 money!
Papa-"No; and LII even admit that he $
frying hard to get some '-Brooklyn
Life.
\ certain society woman who had tax
on offen>e at Harry Lehr on some trivial
ground, undertook to humiliate him in
tine presence Of seine fashionable friends
She waited for her opportunity, and thcl
| remarked, with a sheer:
Mr.. Lehr, will you please send Il case
of wine to our house? We are all anxious
to help you along. YOU know
Same as last?" uueried Mr.. Lrhr
celmly.
IF You please"
'T'hn Nn,,ir. ~ n,,nor t,,rnnI tn III,