davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23
Some Queer Names.

No queerer combination of queer
names has lately been reported than
this. At a dedication of a church re-
Gently the subscribers included Mr..
Senseman, Mr.. Poet, Mr.. Sourbeer and
Mr.. Pancake. And a lady Of the same
church said that she was once connect
ell with a Sunday school which con
tanned at the same time three scholars
named respectively Porter, Ale and
Sourbeer. Once in Maryland, a lady
during a religious gathering, enter
tanned three guests, strangers to hel
and to each other, named Mr.. Sprinkle
Mrs. Shower and Mrs. Storm.-Phila.
delphia Press.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23
SETTLERS IN SAS-
KATcHEwAN VALLEY
HAVE TO SAY.
Formerly from the United States.

Formerly from the United States.
Roshern, July 9Th, 1900.
Frank Pedley, Esq,
Superintendent of immigration.
Strive the undersigned settlers in
Saskatchewan, Township 43, Range 8,
beg to submit the following letter. We
came from Springfield, Bonhomme
County, S. Dakota, in the spring of 1899,
and settled where we now reside. We
had considerable crop last year We
put in on breaking, and it was very
good, and this year 1900 our crop is
excellent. Our wheat win yield about
twenty bushels to the acre. the oats
and barley are also very good. and
our potatoes and root crop all that
could be desired. We consider this a
fine country, and are glad we came, as
our prospects could not be better. A
poor man will get a start in this coun-
try much quicker than in Dakota.
We are yours respectfully,
John Fl. Schultz, H. A. Goshen, s
Cors, B. H. Dirks, C. D. Unry, P. Unry
A. Ratzlief.
All from South Dakota, U. s.. A.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23
"rhis is no right way"
THE FIRST ADVERTISEMENT
terestinE Examples Of
Ancient Liners.
Must try that once"

An interesting question has arisen
as to the first advertisement to appear
in a newspaper printed in the English
language. In a paper called the I'm
partial lntelligencer. published in 1913,
appeared an advertisement referring
to the theft of two horses, and this has
been commonly regarded as the first.
The London Intelligencer, however,
printed August II, 1643, contained an
advertisement of a book on the Soy
ereign Power of Parliament thus
ante-dating the horse theft advertise
ment five years. After the appearance
of these early advertisements, by slow
degrees the practice of invoking the
printers aid gradually became preva-
lent until at the beginning of the eight
zenith century the germ of advertising
became fairly developed, says the De-
troti Free Press.
Here are a few quantity worded ad-
refreshments from the Observator
Reformed. a London journal of Sep
TENDER 10, 1904, which inserted adver-
tisements OF. eight lines for a shilling:
''lf any Hamburg or other merchant.
who shall deserve G200 with an APP
prentice, wants one, | can help"
zone has a pert boy, about ten years
old. can write, read. and be very well
recommended, she is willing he should
serve some lady or gentleman"
81 want a cook-maid for a merchant"
81 sell chocolate made of the best
nuts, without spice or perfume, and
with vinelloes and spice, from four
to ten shillings the pound, and | know
them to be a great helper of bad
stomachs and restorative to weak peo-
Pile. and I'll insure for their good
ness"
"If any will sell a free estate, within
thirty miles Of London, with or with
out a house, to the value of 100 the
year, or Whereabouts, / can hep to a
customer"
eff any diyines or their reiicts have
complete sets of manuscript sermons
upon the Epistles and Gospels, the
Catechisms or Festivals, | can help to
a customer"
"A fair house in Eustcheap, next to
the Flour-de-lis. nowin the tenure of a
smith, with a fair yard, laid with free
stone, and a vault underneath. with a
cellar under the shop. done with the
same stone, is to be sold. ] have the
disposal of it,"
81 believe / could furnish a.! the no.
bility and gentry in England with val
liable servants, and such as a have
very good recommendations"
"About forty miles from London is
a schoolmaster, has had such success
with boys, as there are almost forty
ministers and schoolmasters that were
his scholars. His wife also teaches
girls lacemaking, plain work, raising
paste, sauces, and cookery to the de.
gree of exactness. His price is f10 to
Eli the year, with a pair of sheets
and one spoon;, to be returned. if de,
sired; coaches and other conveniences
pass every day within half a mile OF
the house; and it's but an easy days
journey to or from London"
IL know of several men whose
friends would gladly have them
matched. which I'll endeavor to do, as
from time to time l shall hear of such
whose circumstances are likely tC
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

-W~
IMPROVING A BARN.
Roof Window That Gives = Chance
to Unload Hay Into h Loft
from the Outside.

There are thousands of barns like
the original of that shown in the cut
scattered throughout the country, the
roof space in which is but little, if at
all, utilized, largely for the reason that
the roof space is inaccessible. A barn
was recently seen by the writer in
which this difficulty was solved by the
insertion of a roof window similar to
that shown in the cut. This gives a
chance to unload hay into the loft from
the outside, either by hand or by q
hay fork, and whereas the loft be-
fore was dark and poorly ventilated,
it is TO- light and airy. The style
OF window that is shown is much bet
ter than the pitched roof dormer win.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

"My wife," said the man who wanted
to air all his private history, actually
thinks more Of a little idiotic, sausage
shaped pug dog we've got than she does
of me-"
"And I'll venture to say" said the
man with a talent for saying mean
things, that it isn't much of a dog at
that."-Indianapolis Journal.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23
His Resolution.

81 have made a good resolution to-day"
said Mr.. Sourdropp.
"And what was that?" asked Miss Old
girle.
well, you know l have been a bach.
elor for ~ years, and now l nave resolved"
"0h, this is so sudden" murmured Miss
Oldgirle, getting ready to fall into his
arms.
81 have resolved" he continued, with
some sternness, ito be a bachelor for ~
years more."-Baltimore American.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

Collector-Is MIR. Slowpay in?
Landlady-No, sir.
~ called five weeks ago, and you
said he had gone to the seaside for a
month. Hasn't he got back YETI"
Eyes, sir; he's back"
Then where is hep"
"In the poorhouse.'-Yellow Book.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23
why She Was Cold.

you seem to be so shy, this even
ing" said Mr.. Washer to Birdie McGin-
mis-, who replied with some asperity:
"Your mustache is to blame for it.
I wouldn't care SC much for your dye
ing your mustache with stove polish,
if 1 could get the stuff off my face. Ma
actually mistook my left ear this morn
ing for a stove leg. Boil your mustache
in walnut juice, if you must get it of a
different color from a mouse's nest,
but for goodness, sake let up on stove
polish."-Tammany Times.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

A sweat pad is undesirable if a well.
dtting collar can be secured, says Farm
and Fireside. 1t is warm andit springs
the collar out of shape. A hard, smooth
leather surface is probably as good as
snything for the shoulders. The fit
ting is best done by soaking the collar
and then pounding any place or places
that unevenness of the shoulder may
demand. The shape, of the names has
much to do with the fitting of the col.
lar. 1tl
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

wherein lies the difference between pho
tosraphy and oourtship?" he asked, softly.
II don't know" she replied.
an photography" he explained, the
negative is developed in the dark room.
while in courtship that is where the at.
frmative is developed"
She blushed, but made no answer,
LET US" he suggested, proceed to de-
velop an affirmative"
There being no objections, it was so or
dered.@Chicago Post.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

ooh, you cruel boy, to take those eggs out
of the nest! Think of the poor mother bird
when she comes" "The mother birds
dead, miss" How do you know that" -
zee il in your hati"-Punch.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

"Why this sign not to touch this par.
ticular piece of statuary with canes or
umtrellas?" asked a visitor at the art
exhibit.
Because" snapped a competing art
list, you could not do it justice with an
ax."-Detroit Free Press.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

Mrs. Latto-How did Mrs. Bilkins ever
get the reputation for being such a bore?
Mrs. Barkey-She tried the experiment OF
making it a point never to say anything but
good Of anyone behind their back.-Brook-
Iyn Eagle.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23
In . Glass All Alone.

He-What kind of a woman is that beau.
tiful Mrs. Swift?
She-Well, with one exception, she
makes every man she meets sorry that he
isn't her husband.
"And the one exception"
"Oh, he's sorry that he is" - Chicago
Daily News.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23
A Difference.

II can argue with anybody here"
said the contentious man, fiercely. II
cur argue"
"Oh, yes. you car argue" said the
quiet little man in the corners; "the mis-
fortune is that you can't reason
Boston Traveller.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

81 think il is 20 nice" said the fair young
thing at the boarding house table during
a labor discussion, that the men can have
their strikes during the hot months, when
they would be wanting vacations, anyway"
Rsltimore American.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23
Oh, Happy Home.

Mrs. Downtrod-Well, did they make
you feel at home?
Mr.. Downtrod-Very much so. my
dear. Mrs. Browbeat hit her husband
with a broom before I'd been in the
house ten minutes.-N. Y. Journal.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

Mr.. Sprocketts-You ought to have
a cy%clonieter on your wheel, Miss
Spokes.
Miss Spokes-Don't need it. I can
tell when I am tired without looking at
. dial.-N. Y. journal.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

Manager-T am getting up a show that
will make a tremendous hit" Friend
"Real rainstorm, real sawmill, ETC., L sup
pose?" Manager-"No; real actors
Pittsburg Chronicle Telegraph.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

Hawkins-I tell you what, Sellers
reached the top in a hurry.
Robbins-Yes, he must have made pretty
good time, for he has been blowing ever
since he got there.lSmArt Set.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

progress of more increasing in
terest and Importance.
THE PACIFIC rs NOW
ONE OF THE WORLDS
OF
not a hazy dream OF half-mythical
tale, with its ancient mariner, and
amazOnian o1een and Crr,soe is
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

The Thirst Tor Lethe.
She-I know that ! am not good lok-
ing, but people forget my face when I
sing.
He-Won'tyous sing now?-Fliegends
Blaetter.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

He that thinks he can afford to be negli-
gent is not far from being poor.-John-
son.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23
Do YOU GET Up WITH A LAME BACK?!
Thousands of Women Have Kidney
Trouble and Never Suspect it.
To prove what The Great Kidney Remedy, swamp-Root, will do for YOU
every reader of this paper may have a sample bottle
sent absolutely free by mail.

Women suffer untold misery because
the nature of their disease is not al
ways correctly understood; in many
cases when doctoring, they are led to
believe that womb trouble or female
weakness of some sort is responsible
for their ills, when in fact disordered
kidneys are the chief cause of their
distressing troubles.
Nervousness, headache, puffy or
dark circles under the, eyes, a dragging
pain or dull ache in the back, weak
ness or bearing down sensation, pro-
fuse or scanty supply of urine, fire.
quent desire to pass it night or day,
with scalding or burning sensation,-
these are all u~nmistakable signs of
kidney and bladder trouble.
DIR. Kilmer's Swamp-Root, the great
kidney, liver and bladder remedy,
stands the highest for it's wonderful
cures of the most distressing cases.
A trial will convince anyone.
If there is any doubt in your mind as
to your condition, take from your urine
on rising about four ounces, place it in
aglass or bottle and let it stand twenty
four hours. If on examination it is
milky or cloudy, if there is a brick
dust settling, or if small particles float
about in it, your kidneys are in need
of immediate attention.
When the heart is acting badly, have
you ever thought that it may be due to
kidney trouble, as is often the case?
Other symptoms showing that you
t,aad Syua mn Rnot aro 1aep1eSSuaS hi
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

The brood mare should have regular
exercise, but it should never be car.
ried to the point OF fatigue.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

Blaming others is the way some people
have of p~raising themselves.-Ram's Horn.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

Nowhere is history so rapidly being made as in and around the
Pacific ocean; nowhere is the evolution Of events which stand for
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

|%el$a51

possible comfort. This is the condition of the
farmer in Western Canada-Province Of Manitoba
and districts Of Assiniboia. Saskatchewan and
Alberta. Thousands Of americans are now settled
there. Reduced rates On all railways for home.
seekers and settlers. New districts are being opened
up this year. The new. forty page ATLAS OF
ton sent free to all applicants. f. PEDLEY,
superintendent OF immigration. Ottawa, Canada,
Chicago. ILL.,; J. s. CRAWFORD. 24 w. Ninth 81,
Kansas City, Mo-; II, T. HOLMES, Room 9, Big
ment Agents.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23
Rev. Marguerite St. Omer Briggs, IS
Mount Calm Street, Detroit, Michigan,
Lecturer for the w. c. 7. u, recommends
Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound.

"DEAR Mrs. PMKHAM - My professional work has for the past
twenty years brought me into hundreds of homes of sickness, and
I have had plenty of opportunity to witness the sufferings of wives
and mothers who from want, ignorance or carelessness, are slowly
but surely being dragged to death, principally with female weakness
and Irregularities of the sex. believe you will be pleased to know
that Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound has cured
more women than any other agency that has come under my notice.
Hundreds of women owe their life and health to you to-day, and, there
fore, can conscientiously advise sick women to try it."-MARGUER1rE
ST.. OMER BRIGGS.
$4,000 FORFEIT IF THE ABOVE LETTER is NOT GENUINE.
When women are troubled with irregular or painful menstruation,
weakness, eucorrhaa, displacement or ulceraton of the womb, that bear
ing-down feeling, Inflammation of the ovaries, backache, fatulence,
general debility, Indigestion, and nervous prostaton, they should
remember there is one tried and true remedy. Lydia E. Pinkham's
Vegetable Compound at once removes such troubles.
No other medicine in the world has received such widespread and
unqualified endorsement. No other medicine has such a record OF cures
OF female troubles. Refuse to buy any other medicine.
Mrs. Pinkham invites all sick women to write her for advice.
She has guided thousands to health. Address, Lynn, Mass.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23
OUSTED A TRESPASSER.
A Saucy Sparrow Jumped "a Wood
peckers' Claim but Was Put
to Flight.

"This last spring." said the man
who is fond of watching bird-life, "a
couple of %red-headed w%oodpeckers
started to build a nest in a tele-
graph pole neal my home. The pole
was an old one, having been spliced,
and the birds started to dig out a
hole at this point. l think that they
thought when they sounded the spot
that there was a rotten place within
where it would be easy work making
a nest. But they were doomed to be
disappointed, for the pole was a firm
one and the building of their home
progressed slowly. They were grit
ty. however, and relieved each other
at short intervals,and the tap, tap
of their bills went on steadily from
sunrise to sunset.
\"Their perseverance won out at
last and they had a home that they
might call their own. For the first
time in several weeks they left the
spot together, probably to celebrate
the finishing of the nest. While they
We're away a sparrow CHANGED to dis
cover the hole and proceeded at once
to jump the claim during the absence
of the rightful owners
"When the woodpeckers returned
from their celebration" said the bird
lover, according to the Detroit Free
Press, "they discovered the sparrow
Juggling straw into their home as fast
as it could be carried. If birds
can swear. those two woodpeckers
did when they went for that spar
row with blood in their eyes. From
their actions l rather gained the idea
that they tried to impress him with
the fact that they hadn't been work
ing on that hole for a month for the
fun of the thing. I think under the
situation that the intruder was
lucky to escape with it's life"
why He Fell.
"Why did you fall?" asked the judge.
81 lost my BALANCED" said the de-
PENDANT bank cashier.
The judge had intended to make his
sentenced merely 80 years; but after
that he decided to double it.-San
Francisco Bulletin.
1t Doesn't Pay.
1t isn't worth while to be always
complaining about your poverty
Washington Ca.) Democrat.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23
JUS! THINK OF II!

Every farmer his own
landlord, no encum-
ORANGES, his bank account
increasing year by year,
land value increasing,
stock increasing, splen-
did climate, excellent
schools and churches. low
taxation. high prices for
cattle and grain. low rail-
way rates, and every
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23

need SwampRoot ar sleeplessness, dizziness, sa1ow, unhealthy complexion,
plenty of ambition but no strength.
SwampRoot is pleasant to take and is used in the leading hospitals, recon-
nended by physicians in their private practice, and is taken by doctors them
selves, because they recognize in it the greatest and most successful remedy
that science has ever been able to compound.
If you are already convinced that Swamp-Root is what you need, you can
the regular ffycent and dollar size bottles at the drug stores
EVERYWHERE
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1902-01-23
Why He Fell.

1t Doesn't Pay.
1t isn't worth while to be always
complaining about your poverty
Washington (Ia.) Democrat.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1902-10-02

present who participated in the
pleasures of the evening. Rev. Little
ton, of Audubon, gave a talk to the
boys on Woodmenism, which was very
interesting, instructive and entertain
ing. All present had very sociable
and good time. The lodge in Ross
now has thirty.six members and is in
a most furnishing condition and will
have some very good meetings during
the coming winter, when they expect
to take in large number of new
members. They will put in new
paraphernalia and will soon have one
of the best lodges in the county.
Rev. Weyrauch and bride returned
Wednesday and were met in Audubon
by a parishioner and taken to the
country. In the evening they went
to the home of Chas. Johnson when
they stepped into the midst of big
crowd gathered to welcome him home
He was not expecting such reception
and was somewhat taken back but
finally rallied. The guests had pre-
pared big feast for all present and
they turned in for time that none
will soon forget and which bound the
pastor and his bride and people closer
in the ties of common humanity. A
committee consisting of Mrs. Turner,
Mrs. Andrews, Mrs. Weston, Bessie
Emery and John Reuschling purchas-
ed fine chair that was given to him.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1902-10-02
Walter dreenIee Dead

Last Sunday morning Walter
Greenlee arose and went out to his
work the same as usual and ap-
parently was in the best of health.
After breakfast he was out around the
barns doing up his Sunday morning
chores and he had just finished greas-
ing the buggy and was going up to
the house when he complained of a
terrible pain in his left side in the
region of his lungs. He was helped
to the house by his son Byron, where
he laid down on the sofa. He was
unable to breathe here and was taken
to the door, where there was more air.
He at once commenced expectorating
great clots of blood and expired in q
short time from the great loss of blood
coming from the rupturing of a blood
vessel in the vicinity of his lungs. He
leaves wife and four children; three
boys Ralph, Earl and Byron, and one
girl Mary, to mourn his loss. The
funeral services were conducted at the
M. E. church in Gray Tuesday at
o'clock by the pastor A. Bennett of
Manning, where large concourse of
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1902-10-02
RIGHTS OF NAVAJO WOMAN
She Alone OF All Indian sanayys En-
joys Independence.

joys Independence.
The Navajo woman, who has made
her tribe the most famous Of all nv-
ing Indian races by means of her great
and excellent invention, the Navajo
blanket, occupies social position Of
great independence. Her property
rights are carefully respected. She
owns much OF the wealth of the tribe,
and her children belong to her alone.
A woman may have hundreds OF sheep
when she marries, and not one be-
comes the property of her husband.
Descent is traced through the female
line. 1t Is survival OF the primitive
matriarchate.
The Navajo woman has no perma-
nent home. The progress Of the tribe
has been greatly impeded by its dark
superstition that every death Is caused
by Chinde, the devil, and that evil
spirits hnger about the dead body. The
house is never occupied again. The
corpse is buried in the floor and the
house pulled down over it, and Ma
vajo would freeze before he would
make fire upon the logs Of one of
these deserted heaps. So the Navajo
hogan" is poor, temporary affair, a
mere circular hut of logs and stones,
with hole in the roof Tor tho smoke
and blanket for the door. In the
summer the Navajo woman loves to
move into brush wickiup, made of
greasewood boughs. There she sets up
her loom In the shadow Of the rocks
and lives in the open air all summer
Chicago Inter Ocean