The Lamar register., 1902-06-11

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MI announced his selection OF
MIR. II. Clay Evans success
sor, Representative Calder
head of Kansas leaned over
Nv IN his seat in the house and
Y confided to Representative
lands of Indiana In n stage
whisper, that Mr.. Eugene F. Ware was
to be made pension commissioner.
Who in the mischief is Eugene F.
Ware2" inquired Mr. Lands, blank
expression upon his face.
why, don't you know of Ware: did
you never hear of him?" asked Mr..
Cainerhead in surprise. To acknowI-
edge that is to confess ignorance of
the literature of your country. Why.
Ware is the celebrated Ironquill.'"
why, iyou don't mean to tell me
that 'lronquill' is to be made commits
sioner Of pensions. do you?" ex-
claimed Mr.sLsndis.s this time an ex-
preston on his face which indicated
that he. had-be familiar with Iron
quill. since boyhood days, but was
surprised to know he had been Sc
lected for the office named.
After Mr.. Calderhead had left. Mr..
I>andis remarked to Representative
Hill. who vas sitting beside him:
II never heard of 'Ironquill,' but
didn't intend to give myself away"
Senator Berry came down from the
national capitol in street car one
afternoon. accompanied by constitu-
ent. The senator paid the car fare.
Senator Cockrell was on the car. He
leaned over to Senator Berry and
said: Na. sF Ea F
Don't you know senator. that you
shouldn't waste your money like that?
You shouldn't pay car fare for all
these constituents that come along.
You cant afford it,
And don't you know. senator re-
piled Senator Berry. that when a
gentleman pays another gentleman's
car fare the other gentleman is in
honor bound to set up the drinks?"
49,
"Crum," said ex.Speaker Reed. who
is in Washington to argue case be-
fore the supreme court. to Represen-i
tive CrumpacKer of Indiana. Il under
stand you are hammering at my
rules?"
5 Yes" replied Crumpacker, II am
taking hack at them
Z "Crum," the big ex-speaker said.
reprovingly, who are you that you
should triHe with the productions of
genius?"
{ man named Johnson, was can,
didatc for consulship and the Iowa
I,t, hi fnp ~hn
place. They finally found vacancy
to which the president promised to ap-
point their candidate. Thereupon Mr..
johnson went to the state department
to undergo the usual examination as
to his fitness. He had no trouble un-
I'll he reached the sixth question:
"How many Hessians came to the
country to fight for the English?"
johnson didn't know. but he did
not propose to be left entirely. This
is what he wrote for the answer:
"A great many more than ever went
back"
Z About month ago a constituent
of Senator Depew came to him to seek
his influence in getting an office.
Iou Wiite a itttti tNiiihb "hat va
want. and | will forward it with my
Endorsement said the senator when
he had heard the mans story.
Yesterday the man met the sena-
tor nfthei capitol lobby. sNr' 8
You remember telling me to write
you letter." he said.
20 yes" was Mr.. Depew's reply. as
he cordially grasped the visitor by
3the hand. Let me see. You sent me
the letter didn't you. and If remem-
her rightly | Endorsed it strongly"
No" said the man. Il never wrote
the letter. I've been sick"
Since the warm weather began there
has been startling array of brilliant
waistcoats in the senate. when the
average age of the members of that
body is considered. together with the