Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1902-10-08
Aumorurts department.
Then He Woke Up.

II never saw so much money in all
my life before, and I never saw as
many receipts and due bills and things
of that sort at any one time before,
observed the Bohemian who was regal
ing his friends, land it all came about
in this way: I had gone out to the
races, and everything seemed to drift
my way. Riley Grammar, in the very
zenith of his fame as better, did not
approximate the daring and the luck
which compasses this ones experience.
1 simply played with the wise men who
figure out the percentage from the
form sheets, and singularly was play
ing against the judgment of the book
makers all the time. Horses booked
at 100 to l, and at even longer odds,
called for my money. I was doing
something I never did before, playing
long-shot horses, and betting to the
last penny in my pocket. I won every
time. I hauled my money home in
furniture car. Then a good Impulse
came to me- I intended to found few
dSylulllS, Siloo" SooSoSioiiS@A
institutions in several parts of the
country, and do other philanthropic
work. But the first thing to do was to
pay all my creditors. 1t would take
too much time to call on each one of
them, so 1 concluded that I would
rent a hall, insert an advertisement in
a morning newspaper, and call a con-
vention Of my creditors. I rented a
big hall, and called on all my credit
ors to meet me. They were there on
time. The hall was jammed. The meet
ing will please come to order says L.
MY w-citizens,' says I, this Is the
proudest moment of my life says L,
and they cheered me Justify, I am here
to pay my honest debts says 1, and
the gentleman from Missouri got the
floor. l announced that I would like
to take my creditors up alphabetically,
if there was no objection, and that
would like to pay my more recent OBJ
legations first. The fellows who held
claims that were barred by the statute
of limitation, were inclined to object
to this, but when 1 told them there
was no danger Of any man being shut
out they subsided, and the merry work
went on. I never saw so many re-
ceived-in-f -fulls' in my life, and in a
short while I was almost covered up
with receipts, and I was simply tick
led to death. It was a novel thing,
and my creditors seemed to be as much
tickled as l was over the situation.
Finally the last receipt had been hand
ed in, and it was incumbent on me, so
1 felt, to thank my creditors for their
leniency in the past, and for meeting
in convention at my request, and to
make a few complimentary remarks on
the mutually of the good fortune
which had fallen upon me. I did so.
Il thank you again, gentlemen, says l,
and it now becomes my duty to declare
the convention adjourned sine die and
1 brought the gavel down with good
hard rap as l said it. Suddenly was
sprawled out into the middle of the
floor. It's all right growled my room
mate, for you to call your creditors
convention together on my face, and
it was all right for you to use my face
as counting table, while you were
paying your creditors, but I'll be id
if I can stand for that adjournment
sine die" blow I crawled back into
bed and went to sleep."-New Orleans
Democrat.