New-York tribune., 1902-08-28
THE Talk OF TIE DAY.

From love marriage and divorce 10 dyspepsia
and "katzenjammers'' is a far stride-a jump from
psychology to physiology-but not too far for the
versatile E Benjamin Andrews chancellor OF the
University OF Nebraska. says THE Chicago record
Herald" Dr. Andrews has new remedy 1or lne
cranial enlargement. commonly known as 'katzen-
tanners" which follows a night OF hilarity and
convivality
after debauch young go out and get a
drink Of whiskey TO brace them up, says the
learned chancellor. That is all wrong What they
need is new blood TO restore their enfeebled vital
ity and they should eat beef. or eggs or
oysters says Dr.. Andrews
Where the tongue Is furred and the stomach re-
oures a lot of coaXing. eat ice cream Dr. An
drews is in fact. an enthusiastic advocate OF ice
cream as a diet for dyspeptics- Ice cream has been
consistently maligned for years as dangerous and
deadly compound. DR.. Andrews comes vigorously
to It's defence declaring that II is not only one
Of the best of foods. but a cure for dyspepsia
The position OF Dr. Andrews is sound Ihe
broo- seltzer bottle must be reIegated 10 the rear
When the Uranium shows tendency 10 enter an
era OF expansion and the stomach threatens 10
throw up job try raw beef. eggs and ice cream
Dr. Andrews may yet rob 'katzentammers' of all
terrors-
Papa. what is the difference between an optimist
"oh. ali the way from ten thousand dollars 10 a
million a year'-C-ite
There is a wall in ChicaSo over the prevalence OF
the youth in his teens on the golf links. \ writer
in ..The Inter Ocean says the game must be "di-
yorced from its kindergarten element otherwise
the older who support the game viii quit IL IN
disgust He draws gloomy picture. but II is TO be
remembered that Chicago IS the home OF the cub
champions
Within the last two years the kid question in
golf has been a growing evil. Not alone do the
youngsters, who not even members ana are
only allowed the privileges OF the green through
f,,FI ,F,--Gf n rfsytl tlrc
but they monopolize conversations with the same
avldity that they drive through a pair ahead
Some of the youngsters have ACQUIRED per
sistent style of ''hutting" into conversa tions
with nsisent opinions. wher" they are neither re-
quested nor desired. and their intrusion IS only
eoualled by the egotistic manner In which they re-
fer to their own golf and sardonicaliy depreCate
the game of their elders.
During the recent Onwentsia tournament one
of these kids" who are allowed the clubhouse
privileges on suffrage rushed into the locker room
and meeting another of the genus. inquired
What did you take, Percy?"
"Oh, just dubbed around in 81. the reply
of Percy I'm awfully off my game
An elderly gentleman adjacent chair. who
was lacing his shoes. raised his head sized up the
pair and with prolonged and disgusted
"Aw-.' resumed tying his shoe.
George Stickney who lives IN Lancaster, \. H.
is we'll known IN Lewiston He has boy who IS
training Mr.. stickney asked the Superintendent
of Schools when II would ne duNlSdDlS 10 Send Iue
boy 70 school The superintendent said that the
fa!l term would be good time but advised MI
four and how the letters of the alphabet run be-
fore ne let him o99,t, out 49, .,,.,,.,r...,or. .,o.
the boy and asked him If ne knew his letters
Well, sir what is the first letter.
A the answer.
Correct" said the superintendent. Now what
..AIi the rest of push said the boy.-,Lewis-
ton Evening Journal
ora w Knight of Bangor former president OF
the Maine Ornthological Society. says it Is
tremely difhcut to tell the age which birds
live. 1t is hard keep track of Individual birds
from year year in the wild state and those in
captivity probably do not live their natural length
of years One sea gull. known Gull Dick to
the keepers of the Brenton Reef Lghtship was OBJ
served in that vicinity for twentyfour years This
bird was very tame. and had certain peculiarities
by which it could be positively identified There
is no telling how old the bird when 1t
first obser ;ed. nothing more than its minimum
age can he stated with entire accuracy. II is
quite probable that the gull was thirty years
old when it died. Crows and ravens are popularity
supposed TO live from fifty to hundred years
but there is convincing evidence that this Is
true and good authorities on ornithology doubt
it II is thought likely that agleS and the larger
hawks live 10 be nifty years old. and perha pS more
Again there is proof that this Is true. Mr.
Knight thinks that the sparrows. warblers and
other small birds live from six to years. but
confess that this is nothing more than rough
estimate. He has observed loggerhead
shrikes or butcher birds. which to his knowledge
have nested in the trees for periods varying
from six to years. but he calls attention to the
fact that he did not know how old they when
he first began to observe them. He has had some
pine grosbeaks in captivity which lived from four
TO seven years. but their age not known when
they captured. out of doors in the winter.
He Waited-''What YOU doing at the time
of your arrest? asked the magistrate Of the pris-
mer.
II waiting
Waiting for whom"
Just waiting
What you waiting for -
ITO get my money
Who from?"
The man I waiting for
What did he owe il 70 yod for -
For waiting
1 don't know what YOU mean. Explain your
self
Il thought you knew l waiter in
taurant"
Obi" gasped the ma agistrate.-(Montreal Herald.