Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1902-11-18
ClNDERS.

A man from the town of Deigh
Came to town in one horse sleigh,
He purchased some nails
And set of small scales,
Going home he near lost his weigh.
About So, 900 licenses have been issued
to hunters in this state, for this. seasons s
shooting. We shall expect to hear,
soon, that the railroads have put on
special funeral trains for the purpose of
hauling out the carcasses of the deer
and the bodies of our dear ones.
The fishermen along the Maine coast
are catching Holsters now. They put
down a big box made of Stats; the
lobster crawls in between the Stats after
the bait aud hasn't wit enough to find
his way out again. Methods used by
the average chorus girl in catching a
Lobster on land are just about as simple
this country, on Nov. 1st there was more
money in circulation than ever before,
according to the government report.
And yet, how much better off are we !?
Groceries are up-meat is almost in the
class with precious stones and wages
are little, if any, higher. We can't
buy any more than we ever could.
This talk about an increased per capita
circulation only spurs the shopkeeper
and the manufacturer on to take up his
red pencil and mark the goods up an
other notch. All the money making
machines in the world can't keep pace
with the American merchant and his
red pencil.
What we want is more stability and
less-much less-of this everlasting
foment and fever engendered by the dol
lar sign, wherever and whenever it is
seen.
Fewer strikes, fewer monopolies,
fewer politicians and more time for our
manners, minds and meals.
1t is said Anna Held is a great favor
ite with the Michigan University stu
dents. Why wouldn't it be a good
scheme for the Minnesota "rooters,"
when they go to Detroit on Thanks
giving to adopt football yell like this:
Hold 'em hold em
One, two three
Anna Held 'em,
Why can't we
Maud Lillian Berri, the famous opera
singer, swallowed small watch few
days ago, and will probably have to
submit to an operation to regain it. If
the thing will only keep its hands still
the wound will not be serious even if it
is wound, and there is some small con-
ISOLATION in the knowledge that Miss
Berri will be able to get almost any
thing she wants on "tick" This is the
most timely,bit of advertising on record.
Here are a couple of testimonials
from the doctors friends
Dear DIR. Quacker:-I have been
wearing your Electric Belt now for a
year, and ! can truthfuliy say the re-
suits are wonderful This summer,
when my wife was putting up jell and
jam, she didn't have to use any fruit at
all-she got all the currents she needed
from me. Truly yours,
SHoCKER SPARKS.
Dear DR.. Quacker:-I have been using
your Harmless Hair Restorer now for
three months. / have used, l think,
not over 27f of the large size, one dol
lar bottles and think may safely say
| am more than pleased with your Great
Remedy. Not only have l obtained a
great growth of hair on my head and
the bottoms of my feet but during the
last thirty days have had to shave my
eye balls twice a week
Yours truly,
HARRY MANN.
The other morning at the boarding
house, the Mild Lunatic wanted to
know if the lantern jawed man ever
needed turning down
MILES ANGUISH.