Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1902-03-22
AZ Tea-Table Salad. -

Are we slowly but surely approaching
an eggless Boston Post.
About all the scientists of the present
day accomplish is to straighten and eX-
tend the road to nowhere.-Life.
as she a polite girl?"
Not at all. She finds it impossible
to break herself of the habit of telling
the truth. ''-Tit-Bits.
The President has cut out the hand
shaking feature at the white house, but
the knee-shaking by visiting office-holders
is still painfully plenty.-Atlanta Consti-
tuition.
Thrown Together. Egbert Know
herr Fibert-"Yes." Egbert-"Q
well?" Filbert-"We were thrown to-
gether from the same automobile. =
Judge.
vanbibber "who got the annual
BOBBY prize in the Automobile club
fourteen people during 1901, Ohio
State Journal.
Don't look down on the candidate be-
cause he wears muddy boots; you'll be
able to see your face in 'em after he's
elected. THAT is, il you can get close
enough to him thenQ-Atlanta Constitu-
ton.
Mrs. Mulligan-" so you have no
mother nowt" Motherless Boy-"No,
num-" "Well. me boy, whenever you
feel the want of d good thrashing come
to me and I'll be a mother to you. -
Tit-Bits.
In New York. They've been married
nearly year. and they haven't begun to
doubt each other yet" "Of course not
They live in Harlem fiat, where there
isn't room for doubt. Philadelphia
Evening Bulletin.
Downton--"Any news up your way"
Upton-"Well, yes. Miss Catchem is
going to retire from the stage and get
married, and Mrs. Cheatem is going to
retire from marriage and go on the
stage. New York Weekly.
Cityman-"Laugl and the world
Mayor Of Cantop Sidin-''Waal, l dino
bout tibet; stranger; bur yew jest say
smile. an yew bet We wen all smile
with ye!'--Ohio State Journal.
The Doting Manufactured my silk
HAITI Your silk hat? Oh. yes, George
The thunder he did!' Yes; isn't it
nice that he can entertain himself so
easily ?'-Cleyeland Plain Dealer
They were both her friends. of course.
"Do YOU think" asked he. that she is
as old as she looks?' "She tries not to
look ii" replied she. $50 she must be-"
Feminine perSpicacity transcendS mas
culine ing.-lndianapolis News,
Readings superintendent of schools
has officially told the teachers that they
must read the daily papers and keep the
run of events. In my judgment" he
reads the papers is not qualified to
teach.
1t is hard to satisfy everybody Barnes.
who hires his snow Shoycling by the win
ter, declares that the wind invariably
leaves his sidewalk clean after every
storm. while Howes, who PAYS hy the
job. says that his walk is always drifted
even with the top of the feuce- Boston
Transcript,
I'D surely g,g-got l-l-licked once if
1t h~hadnt been f-f-for mummy
s-S-S-s-stuttering" Flows that?" Il
S-Started To c-c-catl NINA ma -ma-man
a l-llar, but it t-t-took me so l-iong thar
c-c-coo-cooled off. and m-merely re-
MN marked that ii l-l-loOked like RAIN"
San Francisco Bulletin.
Mortihcation.-''Su Surely. Edith" ex.
claimed the minister to his daughter.
you are not going to attend a theatrical
performance this evening" YES. faith
or. shame! DO you forget that this is
the peniteutial season. "Oh. no: that's
just it. You see. this is an amateur per
Torrance. "-Philadelphia Press
Eyes, madam. | understand that YOU
want your book of verses got up in our
best style, regardless of expense. 3"
That's it exactly" you want moroc-
co binding. gilt top. caleudared paper
and the illustrations must be hest half
! tones" "Half-tones, No, indeed. They
must be Whole tones or nothing. Gin
cinnati Commercial Tribune,
| The Sunday school teacher had told
her small scholars the story Of the three
! Hebrews who were put into the fiery fur
mace. They listened intently. Wishing
! to ascertain how much Of ii remained in
/ their memory she asked:
Now, children, where did the He
/ brewS goF'
Down the register"
Jacob 4. Riis tells Of au Irish teamSter
who went to the priest in fright. He
! had seen a ghost on the church wall as