The Topeka state journal., 1902-07-25

DOT FISH UND POLE vHAs By
DER DOOR.
und in ten minutes I vhas happy. Dot
eafenings go by q fish market und
buy q big fish, und Joe lends me fish
pole und line. In der morning dot fish
und pole vhas by der door NIT sign
dot reads, II Cannot Tell q Lie" Peo-
pies begin to stop und look at der fish.
und pooty soon q mans comes in und
says:
'Cobbler, 1 didn't know you vhas
some old sports. How much does dot
fish weigh?''
Twelve pounds
'By George. he vhas beautyi How
Tar away did you catch him?"
"Shust down by der market"
"Do you mean dot you bought himT
"Of course"
"Und you don't go fishing und catch
him by yourselfT
''No."
"Look here, cobbler," says dot man.
II like to get some half s0les on my
shoes dis morning, but don't patronfze
no man dot makes q fool of me. You
had better look q leetle out vhas
bad mans if you make me oxcited.
How dare you try to make me pellet
you caught dot fish?'
'I don't try" I says.
'rBut you do, und you vhas liar, und
1 can lick you in two minutesv'
He goes avhay NIT q red face, und q
second mans comes in und says:
"Cobbler, if you don't lie to me 1
shall bring you two pairs of shoes to
mend dis afternoon. Did you catch dot
fish NIT hook or in a net ?'
Neither one. buy him on der mar
ket." s
"O-oh! You buy him, eh?"
81 buy him for 10 cents pound"
"Und bring him oop hereT
"Yes"
"Und hang him oop by der doorr'
''Yes"
ST don't deceive nopody. l cannot tell
q lie"
Dot man looks at me about fife min
utes and don't know What to say, und
den he yells out:
''It vhas your peesness to lie und say
you caught dot fish on hook und play
him for half a day, und you shall
neffer, neffer get some work out of me!
You vhas a mean old man, und If find
you out some night shall make you
holler!'
Der next caller vhas young mans
who says he likes a cement patch on
his shoe, but pefore dot work vhas done
he shall inquire about dot fish.
did you take a drink pefors you
catch HIM" he asks.
mo"
Ibid you take drink afterward7" =
"No."
Den 1t vhas time you took = drink
now, and If you .vhas lonesome 90
out NIT you"
'.But don't be lonesome" says,
"und don't take some drinks"
''If you don't, it Will be some insult
on dot fish, Come along and order two
beers. Why, mans, if catch some fish
like dot vhas drunk for week"
1 don't 60 init him, und he shouts and
swears und says he likes to see me
sent to Jail for sixty days. Dot Joe
comes around, und I tell him how it
vhas, but he says shall hold on und
peesness vhill come in. It vhas a wo-
mans who comes in next, und she says:
''Cobbler, shust look in to tell you
dot hat six children"
"Yes, ma'a
''But don't patronize no cobbler NIT
q cruel heart You vhas q mans who
goes out und shumps on q poor fish dot
can't help himself und takes his life"
'sBut 1t vhas not So" says. II buy
dot fish on der market"
"Oh, did you? vhell, when you get
him home do you put him in some wa
terY'
"No"
Don't you try to save his ife7"
'No."
"Dot shows what heart you hat.
pellet you would kill somebody for 10
cents. Neffer shall your hands touch
der shoes Of my innocent children. und
maype I speak about you to der police
MANS"
pellet shall take dot fish avhay,
but pefore 1 vhas ready some preacher
comes in. He was solemn. He looks at
me NIT sadness und shakes his head
und says:
"Cobbler, don't somepody nefter tell
Sou how wicked 1t vhas to lieY
"But don't ne," I says.
sAh-uml I an afraid you vhas Z