davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1902-01-11
Both GniIfr

He had stolen several Kris.
From a gay Chicago Mrs,
And the lady, though she really was as
founded,
said she'd waive all prosecution
II he'd make due restitution:
And the felony was speedily compounded.
Philadelphia Press.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1902-01-11
Worae SIN.

Someone has very aptly said that
the trouble with Guzzler is he doesn't
know when he's had enough.
That's all wrong"
''Do you think so?''
Eyes. The trouble with Guzzler is
that he never knows when he's had
too Observation-Disclosures Press.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1902-01-11

man, 10 a wit as well as an expert
equestrian. On being asked what
steps he would take should a certain
wild beast break out of his cage. he
promptly replied: Blamed long
ones"
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1902-01-11
How Ahont Rxnf

They speak OF boys Sowing wild oats.
We wonder just why
IL Isn't Wild oats that they use
As much as the rye.
Philadelphia Record.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1902-01-11

Mrs. Boerum-You have got head
ache, so you can't go to school, Ell?
guess will have to give you dose
of castor oil.
Willie Boerum (weakening)-Ma,
d-dont you think Christian science
would do?-Brooklyn Eagle.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1902-01-11
wANTED-wOMEN TO GO NORTH

III you can cook, wash and iron for
northern families, we will send you a
ticket and give you good situation.
All applicants must be strong and
healthy- Enclose stamp. Address,
HUNTER 60 PATTERSON.
2l1 E. l03 ST., New York City.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1902-01-11
WANTED TO BUY FOR CAS-

Old Grass Tenders, Candle Sticks. old
Pewter and Silver Plated Ware. old
Blue Dishes and China Ware, and in
last, every thing cid fashioned.
RICHMOND ANTIQUE
FURNITURE co.,
Sls W. BROAD ST.. Richmond, Va.
l2-7-lM
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1902-01-11

ctrsus Maa's witty speech.
. George Sawyer the English circus
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1902-01-11
SOUTHERN RAIL WAY
Schedule in Effect Nov. "a, 1901.
TRAINS LEAVE RICHMOND, VA.

s:2O A. NJ, No. Z, daily for Durham. N. G. Dan
VIE; ana MI local stations south, CON
Lynchburg; at Jeffries for local stations
ons on Norfolk Division to DanviiIe: at
Oxtord Tor Henderson; at Durham for
Raleigh, Goldsboro, and all North Care
lima points.
2 80 p. NJ, No. % limited train daily. for J,cl
Senville and all Florida points; Havana
Nassau, ETC., Connects at Moseley with
Earmviue, and Powhatan Railroad AT
Greensboro for Durham, Raleigh and
WINSTON Salem at Charlotte with No
IS, United States fast mail solid train.
daily for New Orleans and points South
which carries sleepers TO New Orleans,
Atlanta and Birmingham. Through
train, with Sleeper, Salisbury to Mem
phis.' Dining Car-Seivice.
IL 30 p. NJ, No IL, Southern Express, daily for
Atlanta, Augusta, Jacksonville, and
points South, sleeper for Danville
Greensboro, Salisbury and Charlotte
open at Richmond $50 p. M Conneo,
ton with New York and Florida Ex-
press and Southwestern Limited, which
carries through Sleepers TO Augusta. 81.
Ms nnShhl Jao at,sntn Tampa Nashville
Complete Dining-Car Service Also
Pullman Tourist Sleeper Mondays, Ned We'd
nesdays and Fridays Washington TO
Sanfrancisco, without change with con
and California.
600 =. NJ, No, u, local daily, except Sunday,
Tor heysvsllo and Intermediates points
TRAINS ARRIVE IN RICHMOND.
ga. M
6;4s p. M From Atlanta, Augusta. Jackson
vile, Ash oyille, and all points South
go a. NJ, from keysville aud local stations.
S2SP. M, from Durham, Charlotte, Danviiie
and intermediate stations.
LOCAL FREIGHT.
Nos, 81 and ee between Manchester and Neapo-
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07
A WORTHY SUCCESSOR.
/" omctbinR Now Under
The Sun"

All doctors have tried 10 cure
CATARRH by the use of powders, acids,
gases, inhalers and drugs in paste form.
Their powders dry up the mucuous
membranes causing them to crack open
and bleed. The powerful acids used In
inhalers have entirely eaten away the
same membranes that their makers
aimed to cure, while pastes and oint-
ments cannot reach the disease. An old
and experienced practitioner who has
for many years made close study and
specially of the treatment Of ofCATARRH,
has at last perfected Treatment which
when faithfully used, not only relieves
at once, but permanently cures CA
TARRH, by removing the cause, stop
ping the discharges, and curing all in
fiamation. It is the only remedy known
to science that actually reaches the af-
flicted parts. This wonderful remedy is
known as "SNUFFLES the GUAR AN
TEED CATARRH CURE" and is sold
at the extremely low price Of One Dollar,
each package containing internal and
external medicine sufficient for a
mouths treatment and every rything ne
cessary to its perfect use.
"SNUFFLES" is the only perfect
CATARRH CURE ever made and is
now recognized as the only safe and
positive cure for that annoying and dis
gusting disease. 1t cures all intlama-
ton quickly and permanently and is also
wonderfully quick to relieve HAY
FEVER or COLD in the HEAD.
CATARRH when neglected often
leads to CONSUMPT1ON-"SNUF-
FILES" will save you if you use it at
once. 1t is no ordinary remedy, but a
complete treatment which is positively
guaranteed to cure CATARRH in any
form or stage if used according to the
directions which accompany each pack
age. Don't delay but send for it at once,
and write full particulars as to your con-
dition, and you will receive special ad
vice from the discoverer of this won
derful remedy regarding your case with
out cost to you beyond the regular price
of "SNIFFLES" the "GUARANTEED
CATARRH CURE"
Sent prepaid to any address in the
United States or Canada on receipt of
One Dollar. Address Dept. l EDWIN
b. GILES & COMPANY, 233O and 1892
Market Street, Philadelphia. Pa.
16-1y
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07
Braved the Chinese Lion.

Ill Hung Chang" says the Shanghai
Mercury, was very apt to revile in the
lowest billingsgatc If any one offended
him. Once district magistrate in
CURED his displeasure. whereupon Ii
cursed him in loud voice, even going
30 far as to curse his ancestors. But
the district magistrate, nothing daunt-
ed, spoke up sharply:
"I am an officer Of the emperor, even
though my rank Is low. You may kill
me, but you must not curse me. Re-
sides, the emperor orders you to pro.
mote your good officials and degrade
your bad ones. He did not order you to
curse them. If you curse me. cannot /
play Mt that game tooP
1.-THE rejoinder so astonished Ii that
he ceased reviling and escorted the
man to the gate. saying, Great district
magistrate! The next day he ordered
the provincial treasurer to give the
man first class appointment. saying
that a man Of such courage would
surely make n good official"
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07
southey on ColeridRe.

In 1906. Southey writes. says Harold
s. Scott in The Atlantic, "Coleridge is
at last arrived" rrom Malta and Italy,
"little improved in health Of body and
not Mt all SO in health of mind. He Is
grown very fat-which he attributes
to disease, and his wife believes IT.:
the fact Is that he Is always eating and
drinking, morning. noon aud midnight;
hardly ever without rum and water
beside him, sugared to the utmost-and
If he is not talking he must be eating.
His mouth seems incapable Of being
at rest. II he does not sleep Mt night.
up he gets for cold meat and spirits
and water. II all this does not kill n
man, it must needs fatten him.
"As you may suppose, he is very en-
tertaining; but, whether 1t be that he
is really worsened or that after so
long an absence the thing becomes
more striking, never saw a human
countenance express such intense and
loathsome arrogance Of self admira-
ton. 1t is at times quite f1endish. His
humor is now to be orthodox because
he has made out some metaphysical
argument for the Trinity. In short.
feel more than ever admiration and
astonishment at his intellect and more
than ever grief and indignation at all
that it is coupled with"
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07
NARROW TIRE EVILS
GREATEST ENEMY TO MAINTENANCE
OF GOOD ROADS.

Highway Surfaces Speedily Give
Way Under Their Use-Permanent
Road Improvement Dema nds Their
Abolition.
II. p. Holland, one Of the oldest set
tiers Of Rockford, ILL.,. was interviewed
not long ago by the Chicago American
on the question of good roads and
their maintenance. Mr.. Holland began
by saying that the narrow tire was the
I6test enemy Of good roads.
have been practicing law in the
Rock river valley nearly half n century
and have seen the effect Of those mar
row tires with which yonder wagon Is
fitted out, and I am convinced that
whatever action may be taken in an
endeavor to improve the roads Of the
country will amount to little unless
there Is first legislation looking toward
the abolishment of narrow tires OIL We
hicles. The farmers generally recog-
nize this fact, but as long as there Is
no concerted action among the manu-
facturers as we'll as among the users
of vehicles little will be accomplished.
The common highway is the farmers
only outlet to the shipping points on
the railways. Over this highway must
be transported all the agricultural
products Of the country not fed to live
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07
They Worship tho Drum.

Among the Samoiedes and the tribes
of northern Asiatic Russia the drum
passes almost as an idol. They address
1t, erect it in their hut, and the priests
Of the superstition by the aid Of the d.
vine instrument effect that maGcal
disappearance" which has puzzled all
travellers from Sir Hugh Willoughby
downward to account for and has Civ
en- rise to as much guesswork at it's
elucidation as the feats Of the Indian
jugglers. The Samoiede, after beating
his drum and working up the senses Of
his spectators to pitch Of great ex-
element, mysteriously vanishes into
thin air before the eyes Of all. Civiliz-
ed travellers naturally hold that It is a
trick. The Samoiedes themselves de-
clare that the power resides in the
drum idol. The peculiar thing is that
neither one party nor the other has
been able to explain how the vanishing
occurs.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07
Get the Best.

People that buy are entitled to the best
and In the long run the best Is the cheapest.
Whom you 10 to a drug store to get some
cough medicine ask for Mexican Syrup, the
and colds, and proven remedy for consump-
ton. Road testimonials on wrapper around
twenty-five cent bottle.
Ignorance no Good Excuse.
A mother has no right to be ignorant of
symptoms that tell as plain as day her child
has worms. She should know when the child
Is pale, looks sickly, acts tired, seems peevish,
that worms are the cause. A safe, unfailinx
and nice remedy fs Mothers Worm Syrup.
Only twenty. fve cents a bottle, and so good
that children ask for more.
Good Health.
A person generally enjoys good health
whose bowels are acoustic n ed to easy evacu-
alton each morning. II BILIOUS or constipated
but never gripe or weaken.
The Happy Man.
The happy man 10 ho who knows what he
Quick Relief cures internal ache and ez tornal
sale. Price IS cents q bottle.
Blood Poison.
As the virulence of blood poison increases,
sores may break our anywhere, every nerve
and bone may ache, the skin peel on in
patches, the hair fall out and tho nervous
Sarsapsrilla will at once lesson the activity
of the disease and eventually drive 1t en-
tirely out OF the system. Bay bottle and
read the many testimonials of cures printed
on its wrapper
PiIe-ine Cures Piles.
Money refunded if it ever fails.
= ASTI-AGUE cures Chills and Fever.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07
Anticipated the Permission.


Ministers have many interesting and
amusing experiences.
A local clergyman was engaged in
conversation with number Of friends
the other day, when each started tell
Ing stories Of weddings he had per-
formed. One of the party had this to
offer:
Some time ago a great big fellow,
roughly dressed, and wee mite of a
young woman came to him. They had
no witnesses, and in fact, did not care
to have any. Nevertheless, n brides
maid and groomsman were selected
from the household, and the ceremony
began. They had promised to love and
obey and all the rest Of the service.
when the preacher announced. kiss
the bride.'
The bridegroom. on bended knee, hes
itated a little, tried to say something
and couldn't.
kiss the BRIDE" said the pastor
"Why. parson, l did, afore l come
here ut ALL" replied the bridegroom.
whose face had taken the color OF q
June rose.
The witnesses burst forth in laugh
ter, while the minister had all he could
do to retain the serious expression
which he always wore when wedding
people.-Duluth News Tribune.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07
Charleston Exposition Rates
Via The S0GafhoKn Railway

On account Of the South Carolina Inter-
State and West Indian Exposition to be
held at Charleston, 8. G. beginning Dec
ember LIST, 1901, The Southern Railway
will sell excursion tickets to Charleston
and return at the following attractive
rates: from Spartanburg, s. g.
For 5000 tickets on sale daily, with
final limit juno 3rd, 1902.
For $7.35 tickets on sale daily, limited
to return ten days.
For N.96 tickets on sale Tuesdays and
thursdays, limited TO seven (D days.
Correspondingly reduced rates from
other points.
The Southern Rauway operates double
daily trains on convenient schedul es with
Pullman Sleepors to and from Charleston,
g. @.
For further information apply to:
w. H. TAYLoE,
A.G. p. A., Atlanta. Ga,
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07

A friend who has few acres OF
quite sandy soil on a ridge on his farm
which was poisoned with sorrel wrote
us last year wanting to know how to
get rid Of the sorrel. He did 1t by
plow1ng twice during the drought Of
last August and September and now
wants to get the land into clover with
view to enriching 1t, as the soil is
very thin and poor. This Is a hard
proposition unless he is sure Of abun.
dant moisture, for an August sun will
about cook clover, without rain, under
such conditions Of soil. Instead Of
clover for such a case we would try
cowpeas, and If we had such n spot on
our farm we would give up the idea Of
trying to make either a pasture or
tillabie land out Of 1t and would set 1t
out with Scotch and white pine or red
cedars. It would then look nice and
cease to bother, even IL 1t could only
be regarded az q legacy for our grand.
children.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07

Democrats in Congress will be very
glad If Mr.. Roosevelt's bluff at legal
proceedings against the big Western
railroad trust turns out to be the
real thing, but they are e1cusable
for entertaining doubts until there ia
a show down. At present they re-
gard it as a political play.
Representative Wheeler, of KY,
is inclined to think that the republi-
cans will change their minds long
before the campaign opens about
using his speech arraigning the ad-
ministration for its truculency to-
ward European monsrchies for cam
paign document. He said Of it:
"The speech was like bird before
fhe feathers are plucked. 1t is only
the plumage that the republicans
have been pecking away at. In spite
of all that has been said the body of
the speech is still there, and the re-
publicans cannot get around it."
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07
.1HE HOME GOLD CURE.
An Ingenious Treatment by which
X Drunkards are Being Cured Daily
in Spite Of Themselves
No Noxious Doses. No Weakening
Of tho Nerves. A Pleasant and
Positive Cure for the
Liquor Habit.

Al is now generally known and un-
derstood that Drunkenness is disease
and not weakness. A body filed with
poison, and nerves completely shattered
by periodical or constant use of intoxi-
eating liquors, requires an antidote cap
able Of neutralizing and graduating this
poison, and destroying the craving for in
to1icants. Sufferers may now cure them
selves at home without publicity or loss
Of time from business by this wonderful
"HOME GOLD CURE" which has been
perfected after many years Of close study
~end treatment of nerbriates. The faith
BAL use according to directions of this
Wonderful discovery is positively guar
anteed to cure the most obstinate case,
no matter how hard drinker. Our
records show the marvellous transforma-
tion of thousands of Drunkards into
sober, industrious and upright men.
WIVES CURE YOUR HUSBANDSl!
CHILDREN CURE YOUR FATHERS!
This remedy is in no sense nostrum
but is a specific for this disease only,
and is so skillfully devised and pre-
pared that it is thoroughly soluble and
pleasant to the taste, SO that it can be
given in cup Of tea or coffee without
the knowledge of the person taking it.
Thousands of Drunkards have cured
themselves with this priceless remedy,
and as many more have been cured and
made temperate men by having the
CURE" administered by loving friends
and relatives without their knowledge
in coffee or tea, and believe today that
they discontinued drinking of their OWE
free will. DO NOT WAIT. Do not be
deluded by apparent and misleading
improvement" Drive out the disease
at once and for all time. The "HOME
aGOLD CURE" is sold at the extremely
low price of One Dollar, thus placing
within reach Of everybody treatment
more effectual than others costing $25 to
go. Full directions accompany each
package. Special advice by skilled ply
sicians when requested without extra
charge. Sent prepaid to any part of the
world on receipt Of one dollar. Address
Dept. l. EDWIN b. GILES & COM
PANY, 1880 and 2332 Market Street,
Philadelphia.
All correspondence strictly confidential.
16.1y
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07
Ha wing a Run on Chamberlain
COnfh Remedy.

Between the hours OF eleven O'Clock
q. m. and closing time at night on Jan.
Goth, 1901, "A. F. Clark druggist, Glade
Springs, Va, sold twelve bottles Of
Chamberlain's Cough Remedy. He says,
~ never handled medcife that sold
better OF gave better satisfaction to my
customers - This Remedy has been in
general use in Virginia for many years,
and the people there are well acquainted
with its excellent qualities. Many of
them have testified to the remarkable
cures which 1t has effected. When you
need good, reliable medicine for cough
or cold, or attack of the grip, use
Chamberlaiu's Cough Remedy and ysu
are certain to be more than pleased with
the quick cure which it affords. Fer
sale by F. Z. Duke, Druggist.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07
A LOOK AND A SMILE.
An Incident Which Explained Mrs.
Mckinley's Luck ut CrIbbaKe.

An Incident Which Explained Mrs.
McKinley's Luck at CribbaEe.
When the late President Mckinley
and party went west not many months
before he was shot, Mrs. Mckinley
went too. While talking with Mr.. Scott
one day, the man whose firm built the
Oregon, Mrs. Mckinley said, "Oh. do
you play cribbage. Mr.. ScottT
"Yes." was the great shipbuilder's
answer.
"Wcll, SO do l." said Mrs. Mckinley
II wish you would play Il game with
me-"
~ should be delighted to do so," was
the reply.
Later, as President Mckinley and
Mr. Scott were locking over the lattcr's
big plant, Mrs. Mckinley not being
present, the president said, "Oh, by
the way, Mr.. Scott. didn't hear you
and Mrs. Mckinley arranging to play
cribbage some time"
"Yes," said Mr.. Scott, Eve are going
to play"
"Well, what kind of n player are
you" asked the president.
"Oh, pretty fair, guess. I play
pretty good game"
"Well, SO do l." said Mr. Mckinley.
'But do you know. it may seem
strange, but it is fact, that have
never been able to play we'll enough to
beat Mrs. Mckinley" AS lie said this
he looked ut Mr.. Scott with q signifi-
cant smile. Their eyes met. 1t was
enough. Mr.. Scott understood, and 1t
was safe to say that he did not beat
Mrs. Neutrality-suspicious. Journal.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07
A Printer Greatly Surprised.

81 never was so much surprised in my
life as l was with the results Of using
Chamberlain's Paia Balm" says Henry
T. Crock, pres:man of the Asheville
IN. c. Gaze.t 81 contracted severe
case OF rheumatism early last winter by
getting my feet wet l tried several
things for il without benefit. One dav
while looking over the GaZatte. noticed
chat Pain Balm was positively guarant. ed
10 cure rheumatism, so bought hottie
of it and before using two thirds of il
my rheumatism had taken its flight anc
have not had a rheumatism pain since -
Sod by F. &. Duke, Dnggist.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07

Statehood for New Mexico, Ari-
zona and Oklahoma has been err
dorsed by the House committee on
Territories, and the bills providing
therefor will doubtless be passed by
the House at this session, but it is
we'll known that the republican bosses
Of the Senate have decided that no
Statehood bill shall pass that body
at this session,
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07
CURES BLOOD POISON.
ScrofuIa, Ulcers, Old Sores Bone
Paius-TriaI Treatment Free.

First, second or third stages positively
cured by taking +. b. Is. botanic Blood
Balm). Blood Balm kills or DESTROYS
the Syphilitic poison in the Blood and
expels it from the system. At the same
time Bot anic Blood Balm builds up tho
shattered constitution. tHave you sore
throat, pirnples copper co!ored spots,
old sores. ulcers, swellinCs. scrofula.
itching skin. acles eLd pains in bones or
joints, sore mouth. or falling hait? Then
Botanic Blood RAIN will heal every sore,
stop the aches and uaka the blood Pure
and rich and i've tho rich glow of health
to the skin. Over 3HO testimonials of
cures Botanic j'ln~i Rain thol oughly
tested for 20 y,srs Sold Mt Drug stores.
81. including C )u'Pete directions. Trial
treatment of B R. I' free by addressing
Blood Balm Co., Atlanta, Ga. Describe
Don't despair o. 4 cure as Blood Balm
cures when al e:,e fails. For sale by,
+. G.. Duke, Or lGgist.
That Mr.. Roosevelt's refusal to
give him the Justice to which he was
entitled has not in the slightest de-
gree leSsened Rear Admiral Schley's
hold upon the esteem Of the country
has been shown conclusively by tele-
grams no has received since MIR,
Roosevelt's decision on his appeal
was made public. Among the tele-
grams was one inviting him to be the
guest of the city of Boston on March
17-Evacuation Day. He is also re-
ceiving many substantial testimon-
| ials Of esteem from all sections of
the country, showing that the people
! do not intend to accept the advice Of
Mr.. Roosevelt ard consider the case
closed. Among these is an engrossed
| copy Of the resolution adopted by the
legislature of Colorado, thanking
| him for his gallant conduct at Santi-
| ago, when the fleet under his COM
| mand destroyed the Spanish fleet.
Schley's case is like everything else
unsettled until it is settled right.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07
Brfbed In Advance.

Brlggs-So you are going to have
your fortune told by the new astrolo-
ger down town. Let me give you a
pointer. II you want him to predict
that you will one day be rich, just give
him handsome tip.
Griggs-That's all right I'll give him
my note for q thousan or 30, payable
when I become a millionaire.-Boston
Transcript.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07
Chronic DiarrhOca.

Mr.. G. B. Wlng6eld, of Fair Play, Mo.
who suffered from chronic dysent.ry for
thirty-ive years, says Chamherlsin's
Collie. Cholera and Diarrhoer Remedy
d Il him more good than any other n,edi-
Gin" he had ever used. For sale by F.
G.. Duke, Druggist.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07
Plaasant Mistake.

Pleasant Mistake.
Walkin' beneath the mistletos may
be a mistake on the part Nv . young
lady, but I can assure her n II likely
tew be q very pleasant one.
The Union times. [volume] (Union, S.C.) 1894-1918, 1902-03-07
NARROW TIRES OUT DEEP.

= NARROW TIRES OUT DEEP.
stock. 1t is also the pleasurable drive
for the rural resident as the boulevard
is for those who live in the city. These
highways should be built In such
manner as to be hard and smooth all