Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1902-06-27
HARRY DANIELS
MINOR
OBSERVATIONS
Copyright. 1909. by Harry Daniel

day the American people would ever
honor me by putting the Office of chief
executive around me. little dreamed
that the time would ever come when
the four-year crop of boys and pups in
this proud and high-headed young re-
public would be named largely for ME.
MY boyhood was happy though
uneventful and unpromising one. Each
spring l raised good crop of early
rose boils on the back of my neck with
mean average temperature of 1855 de-
grees In the shade, and in the summer
raised stone bruises and the price of
pie. BY the time had reached the
point where l was too long for short
pants and too short for long ones there
wasstill nothing about me that seemed
togiveany promise of future greatness,
excepting the size of my feet. Finally
! became young man with torpid
mustache and wild yearning to get
into politics, and, one day, ere was
hardly aware of it, / was out trying
to overtake an Office Since that time
l have changed a good deal in appear
ance, although some of the newspapers
are still using the same cut of me to-
day that they used then.
During my career have held many
offices. l have been road supervisor,
justice of the peace, congressman. class
leader, member of the state legislature,
cattle judge at the county fair. tax as
SCISSOR, and inner guard for the
Knights of the Golden Brick. All of
said offices have tried to fill as com
pletely as salary would permit. / have
always tried to be honest whether i
could see the direct benefits or not, l
have always paid my debts when
necessary, and have always spoken
well of my neighbors when they were
around.
To-day step into the highest office
in the gift of the people of this coun-
try. 1t is higher than township trus-
tee, higher than policeman, higher than
county superintendent, and higher
than railroad conductor, although I
have known men in each of these of
fees who did not think so. The path
way of the president is one beset by
many hardships and people who want
patent medicine testimonials. There
are messages of congratulation to be
written to the parents of fresh-born
namesakes and there are eager office
seekers to be taken gently by the back
of the neck and told the worst. In the
meantime there are little affairs of
state coming up from time to time that
a man is almost expected to give some
4 attention to. / hope that in choosing
me for this position, which, it seems
TO me, must take up the best part of a
mans time, you have not made an I'M
wise selection. AT any rate shall
4 first, last and all the time do my whole
duty as with my own eyes shall see
it, and have. middling good eyesight
1 for man of my weight. And now,
fellow-countrymen, co-taxpayers, com
| patriots, Americans both natural and
artificial, citizens and brother voters,
thank you. Don't forget the dance
tonight
Then, with wave of his hand, he
jumps down and hires his cabinet and
! household help. In the afternoon
there issa reception during which the
president takes the public by the hand
i and shakes it, and in the evening there
! is a4ball, and early the next morning
the chief magistrate finds himself
busily engaged in earning his salary.
The American coronation, if such d
term may be used, is short, and sim
pie, 1t requires very little preparation
and seldom over six or seven dollars
worth of pomp is consumed, but in
England it is estimated that at King
EDWARDS coronationevery bit of pomp
on hands will be entirely used up be-
fore the day is over.