New-York tribune., 1901-12-19
THE TALK or THE DAY.

A Pilot Grove Ciol saloonkeeper announces that
no minor or habitual drunkard buy liquor at
hts bar and requests wives of drunken husbands
10 report 10 him. promising that the latter shaH
under no circumstances be permitted TO indulge
thoIr appetite for drink at his saloon or obtain the
material there with which to do II. He pays S,425
a year IN license fees and keeps his place closed
from Saturday night until Monday morning He
himself is total abstainer. never drinking a drop
OF any kind of liquor.
French Professor-Ah, yes, mademoiselIe, you
spick ze French wizout re least accent
Miss Breezy-Real kind of you to say So but do
oh yes Eat ees wizout least French ac-
cent" philadelphia Press.
II is not so long since william J. Bryan pre-
dicted that with the Republican party in power
corn would be selling for 10 cents a bushel But
now that the Republican party is In power
shredded cornstalks are selling for equivalent
price in some places.
Mrs. Winks-Why in the world didn't you write
to me while you we're away?
Mrs. WinkS-Then presume you gave the letter
to Your husband to mail and he is still carrying 1t
Mrs. Minks&q posted the h h letter v myssf Hnsbsn8,
pocket.-(New-York Weekly.
PENNSYLVANIA road tunnels her into prominence" >"
remarks a critic OF this city. But the Pennsyl-
vania road would think of tunneling into New
York If this city not pretty prominent ALREADY
-
be a great day for the road when it gets its tunnel
into Ncw-York built
Pleasing Opprobrium.-Little Jimmie: Dad and
ma said / was little heathen" Aunt Jane: How
me a Christmas present with the money that's III
the missionary box."-(Brooklyn Life.
Manila" says The Manila Times has Havana
as a model to follow in the matter OF public clean
liness During the Spanish days Cuba contained as
many vile pestholes city in Hindostan or
other places in the Orient but now Cuba has been
flushed and washed till it hardly resembles its for
mer self. The New-York Tribune says there has
not been case of yellow fever in Havana for sew
eral months. American experts in sanitation know
how TO use disinfectants and purifying chemicals
And above ALL they know how to use the water.
and how to scrub and how to sweeten The air Of
Cuba is sound and wholesome. thanks chiefly
to the American passion for the best attainabie
conditions. The Queen Of the Antilles has had a
bath at last. Why not the Pearl Of the ORIENT"
Literary subjects-"whom did you discuss at
your literary club this afternoon. dear? asked the
Let me see mnrmured his wife, oh yes.
remember now! WY we We 6sGSssed eS .nat woman
from and Longfelow'-COhio State Journal
The underground sleeper who calls himself Carl
Atheno. but really is Fritz McManige, lived in
Aurora Lawrence County, Mo. number of years
in his boyhood days, where his father of
the best known local physicians. Before leaving
Aurora Fritz had developed into quite hypnotst.
The Argus says. and he In the habit of
trying his powers in that line upon everything that
came his way. He would often have half dozen
Youngsters under the influence the same time,
performing all sorts of ridiculous things Fritz
was time carrier for Aurora daily paper.
and more than occasion ne had all the girl
compositors hypnotized the time and cut
ting up all sorts of capers
benevolent looking man boarded downtown
elevator already occupied by three women upward
bound. With subdued Chesterfieldian air he
spectfully doffed his hat and held il in his hand
| until he reached his destination.
What charming man! Such lovely Manners
gushed the in chorus
A few minutes later the benevolent looking
of the lovely manners reached his office Pitching
his the back of his beneicent head, sprawl
desk putting a clay pipe in an artisticalIy rnascu-
line fashion occasionally expectorating vicin-
ity of a cuspdor. he greets his s6-a-week-for-ten-
hours day stenographer by toculary inquirine
why in - those legal papers aren't finished.
Lovely man,
Oh yes; very!-(San Francisco Wave.
A Missouri sportsman tells of a hunter who on a
trip through the territory shot two wild turkeys
from the platform. The ohliging conductor
stopped backed his train the birds could
be picked up When he in his report of the de-
lay to the "old man. he also sent along piece of
wild turkey-and everything was lovely
Had Taken Treatment-"Ths article" said thu
| magazine editor, handing Il back will hardly do
Pardon me for saying 1t, but you don't seem to
IF I haven't. responded the indignant contrib
utor 1T isn't for lack OF fertilizinfg material
have read all the recent fiction. Tribune.