Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1901-09-07

Inquiring Person-"What do You tbi,l.
of barking as a business?'
Spieler-"Dog life, si;: dogs life -
Buffalo Courier.
Were you left much in your uncles
Yes, confonnd it, completeIy.'-rour,
and Country.
good Caanibal-.'I guess y5u VII EXT
I've had my lunch. but yon'r re- inst ~
time for my wife's > o'clock tea. Tow
Topics.
Bought Medicine Iimsllf.-..Fve inst
been dragged and robbed said he: =
yawned and said; What was the dTn,.
gist's name?'-Life.
Beenaway-"And what of Willie ppr,f.
pate, whose mother considered him .,
budding genius
Staidhome-"Oh, he turned out TO he ,
blooming idiot"'-The Smart Set.
Yes" said the dentist. after he ha5
finished the job. you have Il wonderfri
amount Of nerve, sir, | must say"
Wei, YOU, ought to know. durn We.
You found all Of it."-Denver Post.
After the Game uckln-"Did Tho
ball make a home run today" LAM
No; unfortunately for himself ana h..
poor. waiting wife. he got no further
than the first saloon. brooklyn Life
See-Saw-'''m afraid, my dear. that
our trip to Shelter island will have 10
depend upon the market-if stocks go I'M.
Vel go down.; And if stocks 20 down
JackSSon-"I hear your baby was kid
Currie-'Yes. The kidnopers bavn of.
fered us $4,000 if we will take him back
but we are holding out for more."-Iife,
A man whose wife passes the winter
in Florida the spring in Europe, fnr
summer in Newport and the fall in Len
OK is endeavoring to get her to spend en-
old home week in BoSton.-BOstOn Satur-
day Evening Gazette.
His e-Towne-'Didn't Dood-
man leave, anything at all?' Browne
''Oh, yes, but it was dissipated immedi-
ately." The ideal What was it," An
appeared to claim t,'-Philadelphia
Press.
a correspondent, without apologizins
writes to say that he does not believe in
DR. Koch 3 theory about it being I'M
possible for men to catch tuberculosis
from the bovine species. 1t is, he con
siders, merely a Kochandbul story
London Globe.
''Are you sorry You stole that cookie
off the tableY' asked the mother. who
had just administered a sound spanking
to her offspring.
Yves" said Johnnie between sobs.
''b-but I'm glad | didn't take two -
Ohio State Journal.
Young Wife-"I received today a
beautiful diploma from the cooking
brated by making yoll this dish. Now,
just guess what it is" Young Husband
Chewing or his burnt omelet)-"The
diploma. -Fliegende Batter.
Mamma-"Why didn't you bow to Mr..
Squintz when he spoke to us?'
Elsie-'Oh, did he speak to u.s."
Mamma-"Yes; surely you saw him.
Elsie-"Well. mamma, l can never tell
Observation-Disclosures Press.
Oblging.-Old Lady-"Dear! dear, l
don't like to see a little boy smoking
cigarette"
The Boy-"Don't y, ma'am? Well if
VII come round this way at the same
time t'morrer I'll try / be smokn' a
cigar + pipe. philadelphia BdIletin,
Buffalo Not the Only One.-Icad
Neutrality-suspicious. luck this morning,
Oh, King, Here's Yankee explorer I've
captured"
King Choo Up Up-"Chuck him in de
fryin' pan wild plenty ob grease-heah
where Lululand has a pan-Americau.'
Judge.
Miss Breezy-"Yes. I'm engaged to
George. 1t was pretty hard to decide.
because | liked Tom quite as well a.
George, and they're equally wealthy.
Miss Wabash-"What finally decided
you! George promised me the most
allmony in case of divorce. '-Phlladei-
phia Press.
4 Scottish laird was sitting on the hill
side with a shepherd, and observing .h'
sheep repoSing i'll the coolest Sljlla'lo4
said: John. if | were Il sheep | Wou.j
lie on the other side Of the hill.
The shepherd answered: "Ah, but i
We had been a sheep yc would hlr' a4t
mair sense. '-Tt-Bits.
''She has built house on the HndSoa
and painted it gray and red. | wish you
could see it,"
Why. the architect told M it was t'
be in Elizabethan style
"Oh. but this is her own idea--a COM
bination Of the Lady Jane Gray an" THE
Bloody Mary. Weekly.
They were talking of the vanity NJ
women. and one of the few ladies pres
ent undertook Il defense
''Of course" she continued. Il adm
that all women are vain, The men 5. ai@
not. But, by the way she suddenly
broke off. the necktie Of the hands m'>'
man in the room is up under his ear
She had worked it, Every man PEI
emit put his hand up to his necA.-
Bits.
GaitnH ON no IIxiuu NlpnI.