The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1901-01-11
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the Parisians will understand my
French? Papa-Iacan't say, Gladys; if
you speak French as fast as you speak
English they won't even know it is
trench.-Indianapol Journal.
do you ever stay out late and worry
your wife," asked the young woman.
"Sometimes," answered Mr.. Meekton
in a contrite tone. "Only yesterday |
didn't get home to dinner until quarter
past 6. "-Washington Star.
"What's your husband dom now:"
asked the neighbor. "Well," answered
Mrs. Corntossel, "'pears to me like the
amt dom much of anythin' except
scoldn' our boy Josh fur not bein more
industrious. "-Washington Star.
Mrs. Nagsby Gmpatiently calling)-
Nora, drop everything at once aud
come to me! Morales, ma'am. Mrs.
Nagsby-Now, what's the baby crying
for: Nora-'Cause dropped him,
ma'am.-Glasgow Evening Times.
10 send away: ''Well, that caps the
Climax whats that?'' Cook says
those folks in that little house on the
corner came over while we were gone
and had their photographs taken sitting
on our veranda. indianapolis Jour
nal
His Own 1nterpretatiOn-W john
ny. I'm ashamed Of you! How could
you take little Ethers half OF the apple
away from herr" "'Cause, ma. l Sin't
forgot what you told me-to always
take sisters part. ''--Philadelphia Even
ing Bulletin.
Then you regret being an old maid?"
YES, do. l might as we'll have been
uowntrodden by husband and six chill
drcn of my own as be at the beck and
call of the husbands and children of ali
my sisters and intimate friends. "-Chi-
cago Record.
The I.andlady-Oh. Mr.. Strvers will
come back fast enough There's no dan
ger Of his leaving this house. lie knows
on which side his bread is buttered The
Undisciplined Boariler (sotto voce)-
When he is away from here--oh, yes,
very kely.--Boston Transcript.
What Tic Expected to Do--Would you
take our darling daughter from us?
tearfully asked the mother. "Why-er
yes replied the startled youth THAT
was my idea. II really hadn't con-
templated taking the whole family, you
know."-Chicago Evening Post, 49,.
Towne-CoIoncl Bluff told me he had
spoken to the governor about job for
YOU. Browne-Yes: that was some time
ago. Towne-Didn't his influence have
any weight with the governor? Browne
II guess it had wait enough. judging
from the rcsult.-PhiIadclph Press.
Mr.. Stubb-Maria, dear, you needn't
wait for me tonight. Mrs. Stubb-But
what will you do for Il light. John?
Mr.. Stubb--Oh, Ill just take piece of
your bread in my pocket. That's light
enough for anybody. And she was 80
pleased that she obey him to the letter.
Il will say" remarked the young
woman, that lie is not afflicted with
that self-consciousncss which marks
answered Miss Cayenne. "he isn't at all
self-conscious. lie will be tiresome by
the hour without being in the least
aware OF t."-Washinston Star.
II Sec" said the friend who had been
invited to dinner, that the roast beef
is very rare. l really believe you had
it cooked that way because you knew
my fondEess for it" $50 glad it pleases
yon," replied Mrs. Hiram Often, but
we had NO say about it. That's the
way the policeman on this beat likes
Philadelphia Press.
NATURAL Resentment Mrs. Trow
bridgr-l'm going to cut Mrs. Uttcrbock
from now en-, the mean thing. Mrs.
Teastlale-Why, did she ask for corn
bread and molasses at your tea? mo.
SHE WAS looking at the cracker jar that
I haer decorated with Chinese charac-
tiers and remarked to Mrs. Reading that
size didn't believe China was as bad as
it's painted. 7-Denver News.
Conjurer pointing to a large cabfnet)
Now. ladies' and gentlemen, allow me
to exhibit my concluding trick. would
ask any lady in the company to step on
the stage and stand in this cupboard. I
will then close the door. When Opan
it again the lady will have vanished
without leaving trace behind. Gen.
tleman In front seat aside, to his wife}
I say, old woman, do me a favor and
Stou I'm -T'if-RifS
Don't you know better than to
tackle a man for dime when he is
talking to ladies:" said the citizen on
the street corner, fumblins in his
pocket and finding nothing less than a
quarter, which he reluctantly handed
out. "Mebby you understand, my bust
ness better'n l do, an mebby you
don't" haughtily replied Tunfold
Knutt, pocketing the coin and moving
on.-Chicago Tribune. 49,,
Mamma--Now go and say goodnight
to your governess, like a good little
girl, and give her kiss. Little Puss-
I'll say goodnight, but won't give her
kiss. Mamma-That's naughty. Why
won't you give her kiss? Little Puss