The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1901-11-10
FUN OF THE WORLD.

FUN OF THE WORLD.
The Shah Of Persia Is said 10 have once
told the Duchess OF Westminster that the
fame Of the beauty lad reached TeheTan
All. said sch 70 some one who stood ny,
he takes me for Westminster abby
<
some gentlemen Of the press WISH 4o-
mission sir. Sir Francis knollys once
said 70 King Edward when he was Prince
OF Wales. and the heir apparent. with a
laugh. remarked: Let them enter FOR.
II they don't obtain admission AT the door
they'N come in through the VentiAtor-
<
AS preface 10 his attack upon the re-
cent army appointments in England. Rud-
yard Kipling tells q story OF mar who
was carrying a bag. and Of whom fellow
traveller asked what Il was that the bag
contained "Mongooses. was the answer;
ny brother sees snakes. and N taking
the mongooses up To kill them" But
your brother doesn't see real snakes.
No. but these arn't real mongooses-
ss
Being very TAT. the King Of Portugal IS.
says M a. r" forbidden by his physic-
isns 70 eat much meat. He calmly dis
obsys the doctors. however. and is espec-
ially fond of beef. of which he eats great
quantities
aso ne was stopping at Lord Salisbury
country seat. where also King Edward
was r guest. One day NJ dinner King
Carlos was asked what impressed him
most during has short stay IN England.
he replied thoughtfuiiy: "Weu. / think
English roast beef is very delightful"
oh, laughed King Edward. surely
something else has Impressed You as
we'll
40, % v-ee .b. -a,,1,- cot ,o-,~sa the
English boiled beef is also delightful
A political candidate. on paying sec
ono visit 20 the house OF doubtful voter
Of the peasant class. was we'll pleased but
somewhat surprised AT hearing from The
elector that he would support him.
"Glad % hear IL. said the candidate;
4 thought YOU were against me-
80 I was az first replied the peasant
when YOU called up here the other day
and stood by the pig-sty and talked for
half an hour. ye didn I bulge me an inch,
but after ye had gone away. sir. and
got % thinkin how you'd reached your
hand over the ran and scratched the pig s.
back tin he lay down wi the pleasure Of
IT, ] made 40 my mind ti,at when man
was SO sociable as that wi a poor fellow
creature. / wasn't the one 10 vote against
him"
= =
8Iorelia in Mexico says a traveller has
some other odd things; for example The
sweet-meat stands under the p0rtaies
or arcades. We're friendly bees and wasps
devour the candies and were not scared
OF. I asked an old woman sitting behind
q large stand. loaded with candied fruit
dulces Of all sorts. sugar plums. and mo-
lasses candy.
Wont these bees sting a fellow
"Gh. no, senior. don't be- afraid, they
are my intelegeutes. and can tell "A custo-
Iner right or
But would not Moreiian bee sting a
stance"
Certainly senior: they arc very intcui-
gent Poor things. they do no harm and
are much company They must livc-"
J watched these winged insects with al
their panoply of war ready. and was fas-
cinated Then ] asked another question.
But would not o M0relian bee sting
Yankee"
Not IL he were a customer. caballeroi'
x Z x
An elderly woman with ar impedimcnt
in her speech had troubles or her own ~
the corner OF Twelfth and Walnut streets
i'm Philadelphia the other day. As each
car came out Walnut street she would
stop IL and say TO the conductor, "Dud-
dud-does th-this kuk-kuk-car gue-gua-
GO" AT this junCture and sometimes be-
fore the conductor would impaticutiy ok
Clame. NO: take the next car Then
he would pull the strap and the car would
go ahead, leaving the Woman at the
crossing. There are five di5ereu. lines
passing out Walnut AZ this point and +
the woman could read the signs she els
regarded them. Finally "a conductor more
cor siderate tha. the others helped her
aboard. and allowed her 20 explain after
wards. After three blocks had been trav-
ersed he found that she wanted 10 go 90
Derby. and his was Il Derby car. When
she learned this she beamed her joy.
h-yuh-youuE man. she said. "yuh-
yuh-you'r -gug-good gug-gug-gug-
guesser.
A little man recently walked into a dry
goods store and said-
II 60. not know how 10 use the teie-
phone VIII you please call up this num-
ber2 Thank YOU
Here is tho number. What shall say
70 the doct0r2
"Teu him that his p7ralyzcd patient IS
walking about this morning
Yes"
'That think there IS hope for his re-
c0vcry- 7 cur on the hair and put four
teen nv bllsters on him last night. found
that his appetite is fine but be- won't
touch that raw meat one ~ his ears
fell on during the night and tnink 1c
ia blind in one eve J find that there IS uo
use iu giving him medicine. ID makes bin
howl His tongue looks as if 81 had been
put through a wrineing machine. What
does De- want me 70 dof
HE Says let the patient alone untl Do
cts down town. By fhe way. Mr Blank
} don know your patient but it must be-
2 sad case
yes said the little man as II looking
for sympathy ~ think that ~ vas at
one time the finest collie that ever crack
81 q bone
zEz
During the early part of General PIN
Sheridan operations. in 1874 against fhe
Confederate forces under General Juhal
Early. ln tho Shenandoah valley Mefor
General Forester Williams feu lnfo dis-
grace with the federal commando. owing
TO some descr.pfious % battles which he
reported After ore of these articles Rad
appeared be- mes sheridan who remarked
So gou have been making FUN ~ me in
rgur BANKED nrWTpape Fur nenfraif
yes veu told an aho1f those corfourge.l
arnhuisnces and paid no sorf ~ reenect
~ the commander ~ tre army iE whira
voa are suffered ~ iiFe There was
re- ezarEerati1n in fnv story err Taa
rlaet admit that Admit h-f. Tr
business hss Eat en- stor You ave ORDER
- tG lflrr rr department. nftrir twenty F
lrur h-1rs FrH gr1r-tI SOD have
et been made coalrra renr ~ the Tritrl
statrs uur, department Ea ~
e. hack fl feu s. ark sraT $3.50 - uth
BE Zines ~ selr erurasa
r. ESQ 90 7ea hse fe-t Gaze aasre
1 shrrlar lr arE T
urlra fEe REPORTER replied hH rEff
art eu af~a1 fha Haf Ha