The Savannah morning news., 1901-05-19

WORLD.

pathway, do not try to protect their
daughters from it's thorns, but they do
not You would think from the way the
average girl is raised. that her mother
never expected her to marry, or have a
home of her own. yet matrlmony and
housekeeping are the natural destiny for
ninety-nine women out of a hundred and
what we would choose for the hundreth
If we could To send a young woman
into it, fully equipped with an expert
knowledge of how to run a house, is to
Insure her success and happiness. To
plunge her into it without one idea or
how to manage it, is just as certainly to
doom her to failure and misery. If you
start two ships out to sail the seas, and
one is piloted by a skillful navigator and
the other is run by an ignorant land Tub
Der who has never seen salt water before,
the duHest person alive must know which
ship win go to pieces on the rocks. Yet
this is what millions of mothers are do
ing all over the country. 1t is almost
unbelievable that any woman can be
reckless enough to take such chances
with her daughters happiness.
heard a woman say once: Il never
intend to teach my daughters anything
about cooking. They will learn when they
have TO. 1 wasn't taught and learned"
YES" replied her husband, but you
gave me dyspepsia for life while you
were learning" We have all listened hun
dred of times while women related funny
stories of their experiences with serv-
ants and marketmen in the early days of
their Observation-Disclosures that are
amusing enough in retrospect, but that
were tragedies to the poor, little, ignor-
ant brides-but these very women are not
trying to protect their daughters from
similar disasters. The first disillusion
many-nay, most-husbands get is from
ahe bad housekeeping of their wives 1t
is unromantic, but 1t is fact, that you
can drown love in muddy coffee, ana
choke it to death on tough steak, and
kill 1t beyond the power of resurrection
with soggy biscuit. Be sure that 1t is
at a bad breakfast table that the young
husband begins to suspect he has MADE
a mistake in marrying and missed his
afinity. and that If there were no bad
breakfast tables he would 60 through
life without finding it out.
There's no use in saying this is putting
things on a low plane. 1t is simply tax
ing human nature as It is. Plain living
and high thinking may be enough for
philosopher People in novels can even
exist on sentiment alone, but In real life
we cannot rise much above our surround
ings. We are never critical of those who
make us comfortable but there's precious
little affection that will stand the wear
and tear of bad meals and slovenly house
keeping. The woman who understands the
fine art of making comfortable home
doesn't have to sue for our love. She
can command it.
This is the practical side of the school
for wives, but the institution Will fan
short of its duty if 1t stops at that.
clean hearth and good dinner are great
deal, but they are not all, and inasmuch
as most women are fairly intelligent 1t
does seem like they might be taught to
avoid some of the other pitfalls of mar
ried life. l have often thought that II
the average wife would give as much
thought and study TO trying TO under
stand her husbands peculiarities as she
does to attempting TO find out what
Browning thought he thought, the world
would be a lot more cheerful to live In.
In the first place 1 think somebody
ought to endow in the school for wives
g. chair of perennial fascination" Cupid
ss always painted with wings. This Is to
show that because a man loves them
once he will go on doing 1t from the
cradle to the grave. 1t is a cheering and
comfortable faith, and they take hber-
ties with 1t. Many a man who falls In
love with a girl because OF her dainti-
ness and charm and wit and AVAILABILITY,
never sees that side of her character
again after they are married. She wears
her dowdy clothes for him, she saves
her amiability for strangers, ana her
brightness for chance visitors. / hum
DIV maintain that the man who pays a
woman's bills has right to the best she
can give, and I have never get known
a single wife who persisted in regarding
her husband as company who was worth
fixing up for and entertaining and pleas
ing. who had to complain of his detection
from his own hearth and home. The
arts that caught husband will hold
him, but a woman ceases to exercise
them at her peril
I should also suggest a thorough and
exhaustive course in the science of tact
There are some women who enjoy bump
tng against things they might just as
well walk around. They are hopeless,
But surely II is merely ignorance that
makes so many wives run up against
all the angles in their husbands char
acters. Couldn't women be taught not to
hiring up disagreeable subjects and sub
meets on which they know beforehand
thew are going to differ? Couldn't wife
make a cast-iron resolution and stick to
n not to argue? Couldn't she be instruct
cd in the art OF rubbing the fur the
right way. instead of the wrong?
Couldn't she learn to praise him
for the things he does well, instead
of forever harping on the things
he does wrong? Every one OF us know we
can lead, where no power on earth would
drive us We know that half the time,
whether we agree TO a proposition or dis
agree. depends altogether on the way II Is
presented TO us-the very words In which
IA is couched
have never heard a domestic spat-
ana II has been my ill-fortune to hhr a
good rnany-where I didn't feel like go
ing up and giving the wife good shak-
ing for being such a chump as to spring
that particular subject, at that particu-
lar time IN that particular way. I don't
cav the woman is always to blame. Far
from It. Men are often very pig-headed
and unreasonable, but IL you have got a
pig-headed person 10 deal with the art OF
the thing consists in not treating him as
~ he were reasonable, and when you find
YOU have stirred him up in an ugly tenn
per to give away without night, for the
time being. The secret Of great general
ship ts knowing when to attack, and when
10 withdraw.
To my mind. though, the most important
thing that the school for wives can teach
IS to Undue women with a respect for per-
sonal liberty The rock on which more
damestic happiness is wrecked than any