davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Bryan morning eagle. [volume] (Bryan, Tex.) 1898-1909, 1901-05-05

Tor the prOdncti0n OF Inel Rna and po.
troleum Is no longer Q mooted question,
and no adds;
Besides these facts, IL must DO no.
membered that IL Is cheaper 70 use gas
As fuel than II IN 70 use coke, because
the very elements that are driven of In
the production Of coke volatile substan.
ces) are used in the production Of gas,
and the residium (coke) left ever after
the gas has been made contains the ash,
which in ordinary usage must DO drawn
OF in the form Of Stag. Tho only OBJ
lection 10 far found 10 the use Of artif.
cial gas In the manufacture OF steel
and iron has been that the furnaces and
Innings cannot Withstand the enormous
heat; but this can DO remediod by the
use Of either bauxite or some Of the III.
lioious graphitos that arc found IN album.
dance In Alabama, North Carolina, and
elsewhere in the south"
Small, weak and decadent railroad
lines in this south have been rescued
from suicidal competition and have been
united in strong, healthy systems which
have close touch with the leading trans.
portation lines Of the country. and are
considered Of by no means Of minor i'm.
portanco in the plans for further consol
idation, and even the latest deal Of
transatlantic steamship limos comes
home directly TO moro than one south.
ern port.
Bryan morning eagle. [volume] (Bryan, Tex.) 1898-1909, 1901-05-05
V. ID. HUDSON, District Attorney
J. o. MINkERr. Attomey-at-LAw.
HUDSON & MlNkERT,
ATTORNEYS-AT-LAw.

Commercial, Probate and General Civil Praotic.
Ttlea Examined, Abstracts Made and Deeds
Written. once In Courthouse Notary Public
N once. Bryan, TEXAS. DIV
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
The Inst Shot.

For some inexcusable act of impu-
dence and rebellion Bridget had receiy-
ed two weeks pay and a notice to quit
Mrs. Highmore's service Immediately.
you've accused me o wearin' fiashy
joolry, too, men," snapped Bridget as
she hastily gathered her belongings to-
gether, but I'd rather wear that thin
tn ugly old rings you're always dis
playin' YOURSELF wheniyer you go out!'
what ugly old rlngsy' asked Mrs.
Highmore Indignantly.
"Undher your eyes, menu" replied
Bridget. slammlng the kitchen door be-
hind her as she went out.-Chicago
Tribune.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
A ROAMING FARM.
The Risk of Buying Real Estate Out
West.


81 used 10 own a piece Of property
out west" said the Boston man to his
fellow smokers In the chair car. "and
I was rather glad the other day to hear
that 1t was lost for good and ALL"
But it's rather odd for real estate
to get lost?" queried n of the quartet.
II grant that it is, but my 20 acres
Is the exception. 1t was on the Kan
sas side of the Missouri river, and one
day, after l had owned 1t for n year,
that little farm went sailing over to
the Missouri side-that is, the river cut
a new channel around it. | lost my
little, of course, but it wasn't II months
before 1t was restored. The old chan
mel filed up, and my farm came back.
I wanted to make a quick sale before
1t could move again. but found | had
two acres extra. While the papers
were being made out to fit the river
cut In again, and l had an island of II
acres. A man wanted to buy it for a
summer resort, but 1t worked over the
line into Missouri again and was re-
duced to II acres. In the course of a
year it skated back to Kansas and in
creased to 30 acres, but | had scarcely
written my agent to sell it for any price
he could get when the farm became an
island again. and last week high water
came booming along and cut it all
away and carried the dirt ten miles
down stream and over into Missouri.
1t added 80 acres to an old mans farm,
and he has notified me that he is ready
for a lawsuit to retain his rights, but
I shan't make him any trouble. River
real estate is too delusive. If l invest
again, 1t will be along the base of some
mountain In Colorado where an
sional landslide will hold things down."
NJ. QUAD.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
POOR OLD ABDUL.


POOR ola sultan ABDUL hamid mas mneh tFouoio
Anc the frenchineh now are threatening a scrap
around the throne.
oil fenown
ana are Doastihg That .hey certainty "h
MAKE
iurk
oAoh
Gown
All TINS inss was ralseu because pool Ao sol On
ly broke,
hamlds town.
Anu reiusai maue them nau enousn
run
tne
iufR
hs"'
oo"h'
now TO apaui thls Is hothihg new, ir oi'eh ne
mas played
This same trek OF breaking promises ne soienhiy
had made.
SO he to the Vizier tips a WINK then follows with
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28

am a farmer located near Stony Brook, one of the most maafous
districts in this State, and was bothered with malaria for years, at times
so could not work, and was always very constipated as we'll For
years had malaria so bad in the spring, when engaged in blowing,
that could do nothing but shake. must have taken about a barrel
OF quinine pills besides dozens of other remedies, but never obtained
any permanent benefit Last fall, in peach time, had a most serious
attack Of chlls and then commenced to take Ripans Tabules, upon a
friends advice, and the first box made me all right and have never
been without them since. take one Tabule each morning and night
and sometimes when feel more than usually exhausted take three in
a day. They have kept my stomach sweet, my bowels regular and
have not had the least touch of malaria nor splitting headache since
commenced using them. know also that sleep better and wake up
more refreshed than formerly. don't know how many complaints
Ripans Tabules will help, but do know they will cure any one in the
condition was and would not be without them at any price.
honestly consider them the cheapest-priced medicine in the world, as
they are also the most beneficial and the most convenient TO take.
am twentyseven years of age and have worked hard all my life, the
same as most farmers, both early and late and in all kinds of weather,
and have never enjoyed such good health as have since last fall; In
fact, my %neighbors have all remarked my impro we'd condition and have
said. Say, John, what are you doing TO look Sd healthy ?"
WAErED- ease of adh eMh that RIP N . m not benefit Tey Danish pains dn aonfnM
" onegs srMef Noehew word a on the package and nrptn osisthute hIfI 49,
%h nt sssnsor t" snf f Jsmssd {. Ss ss% aS% %y s% Ss mt q n%s as sSa as TIKI Sps ssg s:a mica co., n
W spruce ST. New York
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
THOSE PANAMA HATS.
How a Cincinnati Mnn Was Dunkoed
on the Isthmus.

on the istnmus.
81 made up my mind before l went
away" said the C~inclnnatlan who had
been down to the isthmus, that when
| got to Panama I'd have a genuine
panama hat at any cost. That was the
only thing | cared to buy, and l visited
the store having the largest stock and
took my time about the purchase. !
planked down SIS for the hat and was
assured by the merchant that 1t was
one of the finest ever made. 1t was
overhauled by a dozen different people
ON the steamer, much admired in New
York, and 1t was raklshly cooked on
my ear when l arrived home. | hadn't
yet reached my house when | met a
Florida friend of mine, and after a
little he said:
been laying yourself on a new
hat, l see."
"'Yes. How do you like it?
"'Oh, SO so. Buy in New York;
mo, sir. l got this hat right where
they CROWN Panama.
~ see. | believe they do sell some
of our goods down there, but of course
they add so per cent to the price,
"'What do you meanY l asked as l
felt my heart funk my ribs.
"'Oh, nothing much,' he replied, with
a laugh. and, running his fingers be-
hind the band, he turned up the trade
mark of a Florida straw hat maker"
NJ. QUAD.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
To BE Considered.

do you play golf?' asked the man
who was looking for a new clerk.
NO." answered the applicant.
"Well," was the thoughtful rejoinder,
81 don't know but I'd rather have some
one who is already skilled in the game.
The time you will want away from
work when you do start to learn it
will be something enormous."-Wash-
ington Star.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28

"V7ho is your fayorite composer?"
inquired the visitor.
II s'pose you mean classical" re-
sponded Mr.. Cumrox.
Certainly"
wagner" was the answer. "Gimme
Wagner. Some Of these other music
writers start in with a tune, but as
soon as you get your foot going steady
in time to it they break it off in a way
that pretty near sprains your ankle.
But Wagner fools you. He plays
fair. You know from the beginning
that you amt going to find anything,
and you might as well go to sleep or
read the advertisements in the pro-
Star.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
HIS G THOUGHT.
II Cured His Wife of Going Through
His Pockets.


"You know" said the man from st.
Louis, "how innocently your wife will
look at you across the breakfast table
when you have searched your pockets
and discovered a $40 bill missing. You
may have your suspicious. but you
must keep them to yourself. stood 1t
for two or three years before a bright
thought came along. Then l got hold
Of a counterfeit five, placed 1t with my
wad, and when | got up n morning
and missed 1t felt happy. Two hours
after breakfast my wife went out, and
at noon | was sent for to identify her
at the police station. She had handed
that bogus V out in payment for an
umbrella and been nabbed, and she
had been a prisoner for two hours
when l got there"
"And what did you say?" was asked.
Not a word"
"And what did she say?"
"She laid it off on the mi1kman. CT
course"
But there were resultsV"
"Oh, yes. Since that time have left
my wad under my pillow, under the
bed, in my pants or on the stand and
have never missed a penny. Once In
awhile my wife looks at me reproach-
fully and clinches her fingers and
breathes hard, but no words follow.
She can't find any to fit her feelings"
NJ. QUAD.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28

Benson-But don't you think this way
Of spending your evenings is rather I'M
satisfactory?
Harris-Oh, | don't know. When I'm
having a good time at night, l don't al
low myself to think of the headache
I'm going to have next morning. In
the morning l try to forget the head
ache by thinking of the jolly time l
had the night before. = Boston Tran
script.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
The Yacht Race Expert.

He meets you on the corner.
He halls you in the car.
He calls you up by telephone
And tells you from afar;
lie braves you in your Office,
He stops you in the street
The man who knows Columbia
Or Shamrock's sure TO beat.
He talks OF shrouds and r~atlines,
OF pinnacle and bow,
Though all the while you may not care
II Shamrock be a scow;
He figures up the pressure
Upon Columbia's mast
And proves by Euclid's theorems
That she is mighty fast.
He cites the wind and weather
As factors in the game
And shows that Gains and bowling gales
Produce results the same.
lie walks with sailor swagger,
A yachting cap he's got,
But generally, you will find.
Was never on q yacht.
Baltimore American
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
To Avoid a Strain,

Feeling blue, are you, Mr.. Light
wayteY' said Miss Jimplecute sympa-
thetically. you ought to do something
TO occupy your mind.
Il don't mean" she added after a
moment, that you ought to work very
hard at anything."-Somerville Journal.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28

He (rather diffident)-Er-now that
We are engaged, | suppose you-er-
won't object to my kissing you.
She (much less soeCertainly not.
Help yourself. And when mamma
comes in | want you to kiss her also.
He-S-say, let's b-break the engage
menti-Chieago News.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
Just a Theory.

II supposed all grass widows attract
ed the men. But this one doesn't. and
she's rather pretty too. wonder why
they permit her to stand around
alone?"
well, you see, 1t was all her hus-
bands fault. She got the diyorce."-
Chicago Record Herald.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
boarding His Eunds.

Old Gentleman-My friend, what do
you do with your wages every week
put part of them in the savings bank?
Bus Drlyer-No, sir; after paying the
grocer, butcher and the rent | pack
what's left away In barrels. l don't
believe In savings banks.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
Ii Wns One of His.

'That was rather a-well, a tame
sermon of yours this morning, Mr..
Mildman,' said the rector, just return
ed from a holiday.
WAS 1t, sir?" responded the curate.
ct wasn't mine. I've been too busy
this wees to write one. and | took it
from a bundle in your handwriting out
of the library."-Cincinnati Enquirer.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
Good Evidence.

"Ah," unused the phrenologist. pass
ing the hand oyer the bumps upon the
head of Mr.. Henpeck, 'the element of
combativeness Is very largely devel-
oped."
YES" said Mr.. Henpeck. soto yoce,
but you are supposed to be reading
my character. not my wife's."-Balti-
more American.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
World of Difference.

Barclay-You say Perkins is no gen
tleman. Why isn't he?
Dibdin-I borrowed a five of him
about a month ago, and when l met
him today he actually asked for it.
~Barclay-But you asked him for it In
the first place.
Dibdin-That was a financial trans
action; his was a dun.-Boston Tran
script.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
A Domestic Incident.

"John, dear, have you Lit the freT'
Eyes, dearT"
"And put the kettle onT"
"It's boiling"
"And dressed the childrenf"
every one Of EN-"
"Well, If the cook doesn't come you
can cook breakfast and then fix up and
go with me to church!'-Atlanta Con-
stitution.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
Nun Sod.

"Blinks has a perfect mania for eon
densing everything. Did you hear how
he proposedT"
mo"
"He held up an engagement ring be-
fore the girls eyes and said. 'EhT"
"And what did she say?"
"She just nodded"
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
More Space REQUIRED.

Mr.. Gooph-When I die, don't want
anything but the truth about me
carved on my tombstone.
Mrs. Gooph-I am afraid we will
have to put up n stone wall, then, In
stead of a monument. - Baltimore
A mericnn
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
Objected To.

"How did Strlnger get out of serving
on the jury?
"When the lawyer asked him If he
had formed an opinion on the case. he
said no. but he expected to."-Indian-
apolis News.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28

Horatlus had just left the bridge.
"Hear yer he howled, and at his
words the whole population trembled.
Hear ye! The first blankety blanky
blank blank that attacks my reputa-
ton as a bad man Is going to have to
eat his vile book and wash 1t down
with ~inkl'-San Francisco Bulletin.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
Hit Him Hard.

did you paint that sign out there,
mister?"
"I did"
"Will you please come out and read
It for me. sir!'
why. any fool could read that sign"
eyes. That's what | thought, sir
Yonkers Statesman.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28

Hello! Where are you going?' cried
the lion as the feet footed stag dashed
by him.
"Oh. I'm just travelling for my health"
painted the stag. "Why do you askT
MY friend. the tiger, invited me to
participate In a stag dinner party to-
day, and | was wondering If you were
the party."-Philadelphia Press.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
Not For Him..

General-Stop that reporter.
Aid-Whnt! Don't you want to have
him send home an account of your her
Oism?
NO. | don't want to be an American
hero for a week and a punching bag for
the rest of my life."-Life.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
A Victim of Tobacco.

Twynn-Poor Ricketts, death result
ed from his fondness for tobacco.
Trlplett-I heard that he was killed
by an explosion.
Twynn-Well, he opened a keg of
powder with a lighted cigar In his
mouth.-Leslie's Weekly.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28

Wright-Oh, yes, there's been an in
rea In my family-a boy.
Hight-Ah! Is 1t the first addition?
Wright-No; he's the fifth edition and,
we hope. the postscript too.-Philadel-
phia Press.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28

"What Is your age?" asked the great,
coarse business mar of the applicant
for the position of cashier.
''Well-er-I can't tell you that" she
replied.
do you know what day you were
born onY"
"Oh, yes. l was born on a Sunday"
Philadelphia Press.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
UPS and Downs.

Belle-No man shall bury his face in
q paper and make me cling to a strap
in a crowded cal. | stand up for my
rights.
May should think you would sit
down for them.-Chicago News.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28

81 want to buy a monument for Ma
ria's grave" said the Billyille citizen.
"a large one?"
"Well. | reckon bout ten ton will do.
Itll take jest bout that much to hold
her down."-Atlanta Constitution.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28

"Peckham's wife doesn't chatter as
much as she used to-"
mo; Peckham cured her. lie told
her that when her lips were closed to-
gether they formed a perfect Cupid's
bow"
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28

She-You never come to call on me
any more.
Helm afraid.
"Oh, the dog Is kept chained now"
Eyes, but your fathers not."-Yon-
kers Statesman.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
Mr.. DIS Explanation.

Ell wonder why there are dog days,
but no cat days." said Mrs. barley.
THE nights belong to the cats, you
know" Mr.. barley explained.-Detroit
Free Press,
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
All Was Lost.

$50 he finally proposed to you in the
SURF"
Eyes, you see a heavy wave came in,
and ! lost my feet. and then he
"Well!"
"Well. then he lost his head."-Brook-
Ign Life.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28

81 can't help stealin', boss. I'm a
kleptomaniac."
"Oh, well, | can cure you of that by
hypnotism."
I'D rather you'd cure me of gettin'
caught, boss.''-New York Journal.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28

Nobody understands me-" cried the
poet despairlngly. 81 shall starve"
For 1t was against the law to beg,
and he was too proud to conduct a
series of authors readlngs.-Llfe.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
4

First Neighbor-The piano tuner was
at your house yesterday, wasn't he?
Second Neighbor-Yes.
1T was such a delightful change
Detroit Free Press.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
A GreenhOrn.

Van Twiller-What makes you think
he isn't used to society?
Van Wlnkle-He detected his hostess
eAeating at bridge.-Town Topics.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
Gloomy News.

Underthum-Oh, he's the worst kind
Of a pesslmist.
Henpeck-You don't say?
Underthum-Yes; he declares there
are more people getting married now
than ever Observation-Disclosures Press.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28

Caller-Pay me that flyer you owe
me!
Extraordinarily, this is murder!
Caller-No, It amt. I'm just break
ing off diplomatic rclations."-Chicago
News.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28

Gee! l guess Willie asked pa fer me
hand all rightp'-New York Journal.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28


claw
s
and
20
adj
cents
Mr.
peck,
fnoti<
cook
thou
have
Mrs.
walk
the b
old '
way
along
Q per
ct tn
bis v
II
fActu
They
mend
earth
price
der b
neigh
6uett
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28

| Nj
| ''Y,
| ~,
| TIL
|pri
lad
II II
II Il
Ilaki
Ter
box
|Sedd
war,
hey
Bow
10 di
| TIL
WON
oc
b deq
Ing
MOTT
lid I
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1901-11-28
Then lie Gave ID.

-Pittsburg Chronicle Telegraph.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1901-07-18
A Criticism and a Compliment.
IRoNToN, Mo, july II, 100.

1RONTON, Mo, July II, 1901.
To the Editor Iron County Register:
Ny DEAR SIR: Permit me TO make
a few remarks upon two items that
have appeared in your paper of this
date: the one, a reprint from an ex-
change referring to Typographical
~errors'' and the other headed ..thirty-
four years" Upon reading the re-
print from your exchange, l presume
that as you have let it go without com
ment, you are of the same temper as
the writer. of the article in question.
Did it never occur to you, that instead
of these people being carpiug critics,
they are paying the members of your
profession the highest compliment pos
sible; that having placed their ideals
as to the capabilities OF the disciples
of Caxton, on the topmost rung of the
ladder, rather than being DESTROYS to
seek out whom they may devour they
are mourning souls, shuddering at the
discovery that their ideals are shat
tered and that their idols are only base
metal with feet of clay; and when
their favorite Editors, Printers and
Devils show their human fallibillty,
like the ghosts of the Howe Institute
in East st. Louis, they have to wander
forth to try and find kindred spirits to
solace them in their woe; even if they
have to keep their own spirits up by
pouring other spirits down. Picture
to yourself the feelings of the love-lorn
swain who having sent t the printer
for publication in a local paper some
amorous verses addressed to his fair
one, in which he apostrophises her
FAIRY Boots" is made; to praise her
Ferry Roats''i or when they make
her totally blind by dropping a most
necessary ''i".
Needless to say, the pen that penned
the other article is welded by q man,
who if the form came under his notice
before too late for correction would
never suffer such inhuman collisions,
mis-spelt words, or pie" to pass; &C.
cept this as a tribute from one who is
proud to be allowed to sign himself,
A FRIEND OF THE EDITOR.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1901-07-18

During last May an infant child of
our neighbor was suffering from ohole-
ra infantum. The doctors had given
up all hopes OF recovery. took a bot
tie of Chamberlain's Collie, Cholera and
Diarrhoa Remedy to the house, telling
them I felt sure it would do good if
used according to directions. In two
days time the child had fully recovered.
The child is now vigorous and healthy.
1 have recommended this remedy fire.
quently and have never known it to
fail.-MRs. CURTIS BAKER. Bookwalter,
Ohio. Sold by Arcadia Valley Drug
Company.