The Honolulu republican. [volume] (Honolulu, T.H.) 1900-1902, 1901-05-05
THE SILENT BARBER
TlLEs.PHIL0s0PHY
SECRETS A MAN REVEALS WHEN
ne IS CLEAN sHAvEN.
Men Who Ought to Wear Boards, but
0on't-The Poet Who Knew What
Was Doing When He Got a FIoren-
tine Hair Cut and Shave.


victim Of tradition When the patri-
archs first sacrificed their boards, the
barber made a reputation for loQua-
city. and he can't live it down Nov
slisIs and dramatists have helped
on the SANDER, and today, If all bar
bers were chosen from deaf mute in
stitutions, they would still be set down
as takers of first rank
As a matter OF fact, the modern
barber is a silent man He hasn't
! time TO talk, and his victim hasn't
| time 10 listen. In the good old days
when tradition was made, nobody was
in a hurry. A man took all day for q
bath and q haircut and expected en-
tertainment thrown in with the towels
and the lather. The barber poised his
razor or scissors in midair, and
launched into airy persiflage or gold
en- philosophy, or orations on sociolo-
y, economics and literature, or
rhymed stanzas At least, that is
what he does in historical novels. Oc-
casionally. he still does 1t in the fun
ny papers. but one shudders to think
of the customers contribution TO the
airy persifiage. should the system be
applied to real life.
When a business man allows him
self twelve minutes for luncheon and
shave. he hasn't time for iatellec-
tual refreshments, and his barber
knows it The modern BARRIERS brain
and soul may be seething with elo-
quence. but he is mute inglorious
Milton. 1t is only in his hours Of
ease that the up-to-date BARRIERS soul
expands and he goes in for the gen.
tie art of conversation, but to know
him in his moments of relaxation is
to realize how much simple enjoyment
we miss in this busy world.
There was a man who was shaved
by the same barber every day for two
years, and never got further along N
the acquaintance than sentences Of
six words. Then one night, he looked
across a concer garden table, and,
through a cloud of smoke, saw face
that seemed strangely familiar. He
instinctively leaned his head backward
and composed his features. Then he
sat up and said:
How are you, Smith? What'H you
have?"
After that preliminary lather, con.
versation glided as smoothly as
Smiths razor.
81 was thinking. sir" said the bar.
Der. that it's a funny world"
The man agreed to the proposition
Now, why would a man deliberate
ly go to work and show every rascally
trait he has when he could cover il
up? A man can't keep his secrets
behind a smooth face, end don't see
why. nowadays, where everybody is
; laying himself out to do everybody
else. men are going in for smooth
faces"
It's in order that the barber and
his progeny may be preserved to u.s.
suggested the man.
Not on your life. II the Lord were
looking out for the barber, he'd stoI
! this fad for shaving, at home. No
sir; it's a funny thing. Did you evel
shave man."
I've occasionally flayed myself
!, We'll. that's no fun. You know
how bad you are before you start in
but, tell you, shaving a strange maj
with beard and mustache is like cut
ting into his soul and having look a
it. I've stumbled on the queries
things in my business. Someway O
other, after man has been cleal
shaven for a while, he gets his masl
: in working order and puts up a facia
bluff. but when he has always worl
!, a beard ana isn't used to watchin,
his mouth and chin they give min
5 away in great shape. The barbe
L gets the first revelation and it's in
teresting. It's very interesting. Fv
shaved men when felt as if I'd open
I'D 1oTf n~
Il Il often wonder how some men hay
the nerve TO go home to their wive
Il or to meet their friends after thei
: first clean shayes. Do you know wha
u I'd like to have? I'd like to have tw,
pictures of every beared man I've eve
!, shaved, one picture of him as a bo
u at the time of his first shave, an
: another of him taken when he'd ha
!. his first clean shave after wearing
: beard or mustache for years. That
be interesting reading OF cours
some men always have worn smoot
faces and they've developed lines toe
: but they've kept eye on their mouth
n and chins and taught them not to te
tales"
: The man drank his beer rehectivel
and stroked his mustache. Incidenta
" he made up his mind that IL
20 ever yielded to her persuation an
s. sacrificed that mustache he,% go to
sr less observant barber.
NJ why are the men all going in IL
= smooth faces?" he asked.
Heaven knows. | don't. It's Ii
"a STYLE. but l don't know how it starte,
n The actors and the walters used I
q have it all their own way. Now whe
NJ a man comes in I don't know wheths
n he plays Hamlet or shoyels salad {
wrecks railroads. Even the specul
II tors and other gamblers shave smoot
n " now. and it's mistake. OF cour'
as they cultivate a sort ofstone jaw e
rs preston: but what's the use when
beard would do all the work? II
only fellow who has right to We
IT. smooth face is q man with q I'm
n strong chin and clean cut lips a.
TO good teeth and honest eyes, and
doesn't hy around in fiocks: but q
men with receding ehins. and We,
OF upper lips and projecting teeth al
d. ugly lines at their mouth corne
ought 10 be required by law 10 gre
boards. It's ike this vice bushes
We You can't stamp it out. but you
least might cover IL up and preye
= its exposure"
Don't you think it's squarer ds