The Virginia enterprise., 1901-08-09

Courtesy helps business" Eyes: and
good business makes man feel q heap
more polite, too."
eyes, 1 am a confirmed bachelor"
"How many times have you been con-
tirmed?'-Brooklyn Life.
'Can your wife keep a secretY'
Eyes; she has dozen or so of her
friends to help her."-Life.
Bill-When a man is in debt think
he ought to try and get out Of it. Jill
Do you mean out of debt or out Of
town?-Yonkers Statesman.
Nell-Rather conceited, isn't he?
Belief should say. He said the best
was none too good for me, and then he
proposed Record.
'She says her face is her fortune"
said Maud. "Yes," said Mamie; land
l felt like telling her to cheer up; pov~
erty is no disgrace. ."-Washington STAR
Crawford-How do you figure that
the exhibition in Buffalo is better than
the one they had in Paris? Crabshaw-
1t doesn't cost 50 much to get there
Judge.
'How do you like the new professors
lectures? ''They seem extraordinar-
lily dry, considering how many founts
of knowledge he has."-Fliegende
Blaetter.
II know I shall never love another
woman as I do you" II should hope
not" 'Well, you needn't get mad
about it. I'll bet I could ii I wanted
to."-Life.
Charley-Maud Toomer told me last
night that she loved me. Harry-You
are somewhat delayed. She told the
rest of us fellows that long ago.-Den-
yer News.
Daughter-Father, I fear hurt the
Counts feelings. Father-In what way?
Il thoughtlessly told him I didn't be-
lieve he owed as much as he said he
did."-Smart Set.
Bookkeeper figure is 50 indis-
tinct that I don't know whether to
make out this mans bill for S. or So.
The Boss-Make it out for IS, then
SOmerVllle' journal.
He-We may have to wait some time
before we can get married, dear. She
Perhaps it is just as well. Papa says
he expects to do twice as much busi-
ness next year as this.
Bifkins (who is giving a partly
What do you get an evening for wait
ing at entertainments? Waiter-F1ve
shillings, sir; but if there is to be sing
ing, I must ask six, sir."-Tit-Bits.
Stranger-1t seems rather strange
that you should complain about your
best friend because he took your part.
Hamphat-Tm an actor, sir, and I
wanted the part myself.-Philadelphia
Press.
Maud-When are they to be married?
Ethel-Never. Maud-Never? And
why so? Ethel-She will not marry
him until he has paid his debts, and he
cannot pay his debts until she marries
him.-Fun.
Brooklyn WOrkingman's wife Qn
19O1)-What's happened, Danny? Her
Husband (desperately)-Well, I've been
fired by ]. p. Morgan, and there's no
body else in the world to work for!-
Brooklyn Citizen.
Mrs. Strongmind-Why don't you 60
to work? Tramp-Please, mum, made
a solemn VOW twenty years ago that
I'd never do another stroke of work till
women was paid tn same wages as
men.--New York Weekly.
II hope to see the time when there is
no money in politics." said the ardent
youth. "Well," answered Senator Sor-
ghum, gravely, when that time comes
We'll simply have to go into some other
business. ."-Washington Star.
"Well, madam" said the doctor, bus
tling in, "how is our patient this morn
ing" "His mind seems to be perfectly
clear this morning, DOCTOR" replied the
tired watcher. "He refuses to touch
any Of the medicines. s."-Chicago Trib-
une
Nell-Isee the Bjonescs are back from
their wedding trip. had an idea at
the wedding that Mr.. Bjones was quite
tall, but he isn't. Belle-Well, it's to be
expected that man is rather short
when he returns from his wedding trip.
Philadelphia Record.
Miss PASSED. accepted Dick Brad,
ford last night. Miss Younge-Yes.
expected it. Miss Passee-Why? Miss
Younge-Because when refused him
he said the next time he would propose
70 some one old enough to know her
own mind.-Harlem Life. ~:5.
"Can't you afford to wear better
clothes than those?' asked the sympa-
thetic woman of the street beggar, as
she eyed his tattered garments. mo,
ma'am, really can't" was the mendi-
cant's reply; ''these togs is what I beg
in."-Yonkers Statesman.
my good little man." said the visit
ing pastor, II am afraid you've been
fighting. A black eye! Don't you want
me to pray with you?" "Naw," said
the good little man. Run home and
pray with your own kid. He's got two
11.o ox-oo D-pI,ilo do1nhfo proac ~ &rs. ~