The Lewiston teller. (Lewiston, Idaho) 1900-1905, 1901-03-21

Inc One-Yes, sir: be died owing no
body. The Other What an unfortnn
ate time to expire!-Indianapolis Press
Wink.-I can tell a poet the momen,
l see him. Minks- Howl Winks-H,
never looks like one.-New York Week
y.
Doctor-And the twins9 Are they
well! Papa-Quite well, thank you.
How do they sleep?" I'm day and
Night shifts"
! A woman can never carry out her
resolution to snub another woman II
she meets her when she has on b, .
new hat-New York Press.
"Going to the Paris show?' emo. j
compromised with my wife. and were
going to stay Al, home and study
French.-Philadelphia North Ameri-
can.
war can always be avoided" assert
ed the lecturer. The man In the back
row laughed scornfully. .Evidently. :
he said. the speaker is not married. -
Chicago Post.
Joe-Aren'e you rejoiced that ont,
door sports have begun AGAIN. "Out-
door sports7 Oh. say--you don't mean
It's time to beat carpets again. do you r
Chicago Record.
Bookkeeper-Your wife IL at the door
or. and would like to speak to you I
moment Mr.. Sellers-Yes; Just zee
what my balance at the bank Il, viii
you! Harper's Bazaar.
Yes, madam" sighed the ash man.
= have seen better days. was once
~ Ice man. but was fred" "Ah. I
see." said the lady: you were reduced
70 ashes."-Philadelphia Record.
"Marie. after we are married what
course shall you pursue to retain ny
lover "Oh, Harry. / shall spend a
awful lot Of money on flne clothes and
look Just - pretty - cam Chicago
Record.
Mans obiter dictum: He-There are
two periods In q mans life when he
never understands Z woman. She-In.
iced, and when are theyf He-Before
ae IL married and afterward.- Golfers
Weekly.
: Mn. ucker-Tommy. what makes
ron 20 late7 Tommy-Had some words
with the teacher. and she kept me In
after school. Mrs. Tucker-You had
words with the teacher7 Tommy
Yes'm. ! couldn't spell 'em.-C Chicago
Tribune.
I'm glad to zee the snow disappear.
amg." he said. II suppose that You are
thinking Of the horrible crossings Il
makes" mo. not exactly. There are
several bad boys In our neighborhood
and they don't care who they pelt with
Doakers."
Bibbs-How d II Jones has thrown
sp South Africa. thought he volun.
teered7 Dibbs-so he did, but he al
sered his mind. Bibbs-What made him
10 thati Dibbs-He got to know that
ais mother-in-law was going out q Z
nurse.-Pick-Me-Up.
"Thurston Tompkins says he d IN
poverty through no fault OF his own"
How does he make that outr' "Why,
ae says he was born with expensive !
tastes, but without sense enough to |
sarn the money to keep up with them"
indianapolis Journal.
II didn't know you intended to move |
this spring" I'VE don't ''But your
wife told me she was out looking at
aouses all day yesterday. 'Well. that's |
rue enough; but don't you know there |
Q Q vast difference between looking |
at houses and looking for houses ~
Chicago Times.
She Oh. Harry. did you mail that
aorrid. hateful letter wrote papa? He |
must have sent this 500 check the day
wrote it. He-Yes. mailed 1t; he'e
got 1t by this time. She-That's you'll |
Whenever l give you q letter to mail
hath get me in trouble. You 60 right
~ and mail it.-Ind!anapolis Journal.
Mrs. Ats really extraordinary
Ny nurse tells me that gentlemen are
always stopping her in the street to adj
nire my little girl. Mrs. blow love
y she must bel Mrs. A.-Oh, don't
Know. OF course l think her pretty,
because / am her mother. Mrs. b.
Oh. meant the nurse. dear.-Punch.
The Farmer-Why don't you work.
The Tramp-D yer t'ink everybody In
le world u crazy? I never worked Ia
ne life. but don't owe anyone q cent,
While l s'pose you've bin workin' since
1er was able ter drive cow; an Tu
yet dey's a mortgage or. yer farm dat
leeps yer hustfin' ter pay de int'rest
'nHPuck.
A benefactor: James" whispered |,
he good woman. there's burglar in /,
be parlor. He stumbled against the
'iano in the dark. ! heard several OF