The Washington times., 1901-08-11
THE ENGAGED GIRL.
She should He n sister to HeI
Fiance. ..


How shall the engaged girl act and just
what shall she allow herself in the way
/ of accepting attentions from other men
and particularly from her affanced, is a
| question that has been frequently asked
me. says Mrs. Grey. Garfield in the Chi
I cago Chronicle"
Re garding the engaged girls conduct
! with other men ii can be stated that she
should be circumspect and more than cir
cumspect. In addition to this she should
be kind III a way that involves more than
mere etiquette. She should consider the
feelings not only Of the one dearest to
| her, but of those who come in contact
with her.
The engaged girl who during the abb
sence of her betr2thsd refuses to join
small parties upon little summer eNcur-
sions, who considers simple games indie
corous, who will not as much. as walk
out. making one of a group taking
promenade of "A summer evening, makes
a mistake. She is too proper by far too
absurdly decorous. TOO prudish.
The easy, pleasant camaraderie of the
engaged girl makes her a great summer
favorite. and if she will take her place
becomingly in the society of the summer
city in which she is placed she will find
that belleship becomes hers when it could
not belong to her under any other condi-
tions. Out Of the race. to use vulgar
ism, she is liked 10y the young women be-
cause of her total absence of rivalry, and
liked by the young men because of her
cheerful companionship5 without trace Of
coquetry. For all she has camaraderie
which is delightful.
when the betrothed of the engaged girl
appears upon the scene all is changed for
her. She is now at liberty to go and to
do, to lead and be led, she can dance and
take part in a conspicuous way, as BELTS
her talents If she have any, in every en-
tertainment in the house, and the engaged
girl who has been quiet and a little in the
background now comes forth conspicu-
ously, because OF the fact that she has
by her side her chosen protector and the
things which she could not do as an en-
gagged girl with her betrothed absent are
now possible for her.
1T is at this stage that the engaged girl
is liable to err. Unless unusually well
bred she will make public exhibition of
her affection, be too devoted, perhaps, too
utterly settled down, too wifely in de-
meanor, too exclusive, as far as the others
are concerned, and not sufficiently alive
to the fact that though engaged she is
the two from the standpoint of society |
there is as wide a gulf fixed as in the |
home.
To know just how many loverlike at |
tentions to accept, how many moonlight |
walks 20 take alone, how far to drive UNI |
for how long a time the |
piazza tete-a-tete can be continued. these |
are questions which the engaged summer |
girl must decide for herself or they must |
be decided for her by her chaperon.
1t Is far from good form Tor the en-
gagged girl to drive day after day alone, |
the worst of bad taste to pro-
long the drives into whole days eXcur-
sions or to in any way bring down the
,harge of seeking to seclude herself from
he rest of the company. The attitude of |
he engaged girl should be that of a sis
er toward her affianced, she showing a
preference for his company, wish to be
agreeable to him, desire to accompany
him, or to be one of all parties of which |
ne is part, but beyond this, very little |
more.
The engaged period is a halcyon time, |
nut it is also trying one. The engaged
,irl does not know exactly what she may
md what she may not do, and in the de-
.iding she is likely to make mistakes,
which, while by no means serious. may
ring down the word of criticism, which
he would like to avoid.
Criticism is too sharp a word to apply
o the summer girl who is away from
lone in the society of her betrothed, for |
III the world loves a lover and all the
world will be partial to her. but at the
anne time she should, and must, show |
aution or she will allow her betrothed to |
evote himself to her with energy and |
EMOTIONAL perseverance which is far from
cling desirable z=Trs=t