New-York tribune., 1901-05-04
TEARS, IDLE TEARS.
SOME OBSERVATIONS on THEM BY AN
DREW LANG.
From The London Morning Post.

From The London Morning Post.
The heroes of Homer great, strapping fellows
veeD on the slightest opportunity Menelaus
cries when he is wounded-nOt badly. Mr.. Kip
ling l think is nv authority for saying that
every one cries when ne is shot In the hahd-
The foot seems less apt when injured to cause
tears I lately met a very young gentleman
who after adequately bayonetting Boer, was
himself shot in the foot. But. from his descrip-
tion az tho sensation II was as II somebody had
thrown a stone at him, and he did not weep
At any emotion Homers men cry, without any
OF our false modesty. In one place hero is de-
scrbed by the great poet as weeping like a
waterfall" which to US Northern people seems
rather absurd The heroes OF the old French
epic, The Song of Roland" cry; the whole army,
without exception. blubber when they think Of
sweet France during peninsular campaign. on
the other hand | do not remember a single in
stance In which the tough warriors or the Morse
sagas weep. our early Norman kings. hard
bitten men, rolled the floor and gnawed at
straws instead of crying; they also swore terri
bly, especially William Rufus. Now. II you come
to think of it. the Romans and still more the
Greeks. appear to have been practically ignorant
Of profane swearing. Homer never tells US that
our men swore terribly In" Troia They could
curse, I admit, but TO curse was rather an elab-
oratc affair CASUALLY resorted to by injured
mothers), not a mere explosion of irritation. No
Homerc hero. however angry eXclaims. You
go to Tartarus." They had not even word for
our brief popular expression of hostile interest
in the future life of irritating person. Field
ing makes the village boys say TO Phaethon. the
son of the sun:
You the Suns son. you rascal-you be id!
But here the learned author OF Tom Jones" per
mits himself 10 enjoy anachronism. The in
ference from these considera tions is that the
early Greek warriors cried much because
they did not know how to swear a practice far
more military and manly. Swift tells us that
when all London expected the last day the Off
GERS of her majesty Queen Anne swore even more
than common, lest their men should think that
any occasion. however serious. could daunt a
gentleman who wore the Queens uniform. The
intention, by itself. excellent, but Achilles
and Agamemnon would have sat down and
cried, a thing detrimental to discipline.
The next best weepers known to history are
the philosophers of the eighteenth century Their
great idea was to return to a state of nature
which was presently done in the savage feroc-
tiles Of the glorious revolution. But before
niood was shed in rivers the philosophers re-
turned TO a state of nature by weeping like
waterfalls. Rousseau, especially. outdid Job
Trotter. Mr.. Jngle's servant in "Pickwick
gentleman whom this lackey genius greatly re-
sembled. Rousseau tells us that he used to walk
along the road weeping when he thought what
nne old fellow the Earl Marschal was Even
Agamemnon would not have cried at the re6ec
ton that Nestor a fine old fellow On the
Scottish shoulder and velvet coat adorned with
yellow butterflies. of Mr.. David Hume did lean
Jacques also shed the tears OF sensibity greatly
dlsconcerting Mr. Hume. daisy a pretty yirI
a bird in the branches flower by the wav
were enough to set the lachrymatOry glands Of
the philosopher at work. He went ont ON the
main and did the briny." The .ctica became
fashionable, as the novels Of the period show ~
we can trust the novels of the period