Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1901-05-01
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No-s~o-o-ooo.

Dodson-Tapley hopes to be soci.,
lion. Fogson-l don't see why ba
shouldn't be; he is already a cub.-Har
lem Life.
Mr.. Newed-Um! Seems to me. nv
angel this hash has queer tasta
Young Wife-Hasb? That's fruitcaka
New York Weekly.
Munnybags-My daughter is going to
marry a duke. Reporter-What Won
need, Mr.. Mummy bags, is a press agent
Ohio State Journal.
Rap-I look upon you, sir, as a ras.
cal Partee-You are privileged to
look upon me In any character you de.
sire to assume, Sick.
yep Blifkens has gone stark
staring daffy" what caused itr
'Trying to keep track Of the baseball
war"-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
He-Don't you think that Is funny
story? She-Yes; but l have got the
neuralgia too bad to-day to laugh a,
anything. Journal
The Kangaroo-A hunter chased me
ten miles to-day. The Ostrich-I'll bet
you were mad, eh? The Kangaroo
Mad! l was hopping!-Town Topics.
| His Profession: Prisoner-I was
quietly attending to my work when this
man arrested me Magistrate-What Is
your business? Prisoner-I am burg.
lar.-Tit-Blts.
Jake (timidly)-I wish knowed what
Miss Linda. Miss Linda (coyly)-'T
wouldn't take no great while to find
out, Jake.-Puck.
Casey-Whoi don't We pay Cassidy
tn tin cints We owe him? Cosugan-
Faith, Cassidy puts up such a good
foight Oh wudn't be friends wild him
fer anything.-Judge.
"Pa," asked little George, whats
the pomp and circumstance of war, any
way~ General Miles," replied the old
gentleman, without looking up from
his paper.-Chicago Times-Herald.
my daughter had quiet wedding
on account of her husbands recent
bereavement HAS he lost near
relatiye?" Eyes; his first wife has
been dead only six months. "-Chicago
Record.
"These druggists make me tired with
their superfiuous directions" "Whats
the matter nowY "Why, this prescrip-
ton had filed for the ague has label
on 1t: Shake before taking "-Phila-
delphia Press.
81 think Miss Sorosls is a girl of
very pronounced character" What
leads you to that belief" "She got all
ready to go to the theater and never
once asked If her hat was on straight"
Philadelphia Times.
A Different Point of View: Willie
(crying)-Mamma- = boo-hoo! = Joe hit
me with great big brick! Boo-hoo!
Mamma-And what did you do to him,
dear? .Willie-I hit him gently with
that same little brick he threw at me.
Exchange.
Criteek-That Western Napoleon of
! Finance whom you have written up In
to-days paper must be a man Of enor-
nous longevity. Edltor-Why? Grit
eek-You say, HE Is reputed to have
made six million. dollars in as many
years. "-Philadelphia Record.
Quashing an alibi: Defense Advo-
cate-"Sir, the officer charged with be-
ing intoxicated while on duty is above
the breath Of suspicion" Police Com
missioner-"Sir, your statement Is Ill
timed; the accused Is even at this mo-
ment munching cloves."-Judge.
Tommy--Mamma makes me go to bed
every night at o'clock. Minister
Well, you know, she does that to make
you healthy. TOMMY guess that's
SO. l notice when pa doesn't get home
to bed till after midnight he don't look
healthy next morning.-Philadelph
Record.
Henrietta, of Gainesville, says: "My
papa objects to my admirers sitting on
the steps and talking with me until q
late hour at night. He claims that he
cannot sleep on account of our noise.
What would you adviser advise
papa to sleep In the daytime. "-Balti-
more American.
you told me-" said the Infatuated
purchaser, that that brook on the farm
you sold me never ran dry" "Guess
did," said the real estate man. ut has
been dry all summer" "When 1t was
dry, 1t didn't run, did It? Therefore, 1t
could not run dry; we never decelve."-
indianapolis Press.
Mrs. Church-You say they will not
take any children in these flats? Mrs.
Gotham-That's the rule, and they
carry 1t out to the letter. "Why, when
| came upstairs | saw three or four
dirty children on the stairway"
"Oh, well, those belong to the janitor."
-Yonkers Statesman.
Mrs. Stubb-John, expect to attend
the sewing circle tonight. Mr.. Stubb-
Well, Maria, what is the program? Mrs.
Stubb-We are going to discuss this