Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1901-04-30
DUsENBERRY's WATCH DOG.
As Described by Mrs. Dusenbcrry Is
Anything But a Treasure
About the House.

ssYes,'' said Mrs. Dusenberry, in a
burst of confidence to an inquiring
caller, relates Will S. Gridley, in Wom-
ans Home Companions; yes, Mr.. Du-
senberry has got a new watch dog,
though what under the sun he wants
watch dog for is more than I know.
Perhaps Mr.. Dusenberry knows, but
he hasn't let me into the secret yet.
Maybe he bought it because it was
cheap. He is always buying things
because they're cheap, no matter
whether they are ever going to be of
any use to him or not. Why, only
last week he came home with an old
fashioned canopy-topped cradle that
he had picked up somewhere at an
auction; and when 1 asked him what
on earth he wanted with a contrap-
ton of that sort-seeing our only son,
John Henry, Jr., was going on 21
years old, and the cradle was out of
date, anyway, so that no self-respect
ing infant would ever consent to
sleep in 1.-THE looked just about as
foolish as a man can look when he
tries real hard not to, and said the
cradle was as sound as the day it
was made, and it cost him only 60
cents, anyhow, and he wasn't going
to let some one else gobble up a bar
gain like that so long as he had the
spare change right in his pocket. No,
stree, he wasn't that kind of mani
''Another time he came home with
an oX-yoke-it's up in the garnet now,
alongside of the cradle-and, on my
word, I don't believe Mr.. Dusenberry
would know how to put it on an OK
team even if he owned one, which he
doesn't, and never expects to, so far
as I know.
perhaps he is going to paint it
some time aud hang it up in the par
Tor for, an ornament, or maybe he is
going to wait until he gets another
dog and then use it to yoke them up
together and make a spectacle of
himself by driving around the village
with a dog-team.
Zone thing is certain, though, that
watch dog, as Mr.. Dusenberry calls
it, is fast making an insufferable nui-
sance of himself. The very first day
he came on the place he chased my
Angora cat up a tree, and kept her
there so long she nearly starved, and
she's afraid as death of him even yet.
And Monday, when the hired girl
went into the yard with a basketful
of clean clothes to hang out to dry,
that dog jumped up and began paw
ing her over, knocking the basket out
of her hands and tumbling the clean
linen in the dirt, so it had to be
washed all over again. And Tuesday
he drove setting hen off the nest,
and kept her off so long the eggs all
spoiled, and then turned around and
bit one of the neighbours children and
got them down on us for life; and
when a tramp came along a little
later he crawled behind the woodpile
the dog did-and never stuck his
head out or even barked until the
tramp had gone. Oh, he's a valuable
watch dog, he is! And the next aft
ernoon, when the minister came along
on his regular pastoral call, that
shopping dog got scent of a package
of sausage which Mr.. Meek was
carrying home under his arm, it hav-
ing been presented to him by the
butchers wife, where he called last;
and don't know just how it hap
pened, but when I got to the door
the dog had hold of one end of the
the other end (there were about 40
links of it,, I should judge, and they
were racing in a circle around the
lawn as fast as they could jump, with
the dominic about three jumps ahead.
81 went out with broom and drove
the dog away (they each got about
half of the sausage on the final tug),
and apologized for the behavior of
the animal, and invited Mr.. Meek into
the parlor; but I noticed he cut his
call pretty middling short and seemed
anxious to get safely off the prem
Uses with the remainder of that sau-
sage. And he hasn't been back since,
though his usual calling day has gone
by long ago, and I'm awfulIy worried
for fear he may feel put out over the
affair yet, though goodness knows it
wasn't my fault the dog took after
him: and, besides, apologized the
best I knew how. I know thing of
that kind is very notifying; but he
doesn't feel any worse than 1 do over
it, not a particle, and-oh, got to go
now, have you? Well, run in again
any time; don't wait for me to call;
and if you hear of anybody that
wants to get watch dog real bad,
send them around and I'll see if I
can't induce Mr.. Dusenberry to part
with ours"