The Wilmington daily Republican., 1901-10-07
A TALE OF CRABS.

/ @InO Droker 70 not ABOVE tetllng g00o
story on himself. When he declined su
invitation shortly after three o'clock ons
afternoon last week to join half . dozen
friends for cocktail or two their surprise
was followed by suspicion.
NO" said Mr.. Broker. Never again, Of
rather not until September l5."
Something must have jolted you hard I'd
knock you into the ice wagon at this tima
Of the year.. said Mr.. Rockaway.
"ln view Of the fact that promised my
wife not to take even little snifter until
after September lo," said Mr.. Broker, "un'
der penalty OF her telling the story on me,
don't see that can. give you any sx'
| plsnation."
| Never heard anything like this" said
Nh. Hampstead. you never drink to ex.
cess, and the9idea Of you swearing of for
q limited time IL sabsurd.''
la''1tis really very good story" said Mr..
Broker. hesitatingly.
FIRED promised to mix a new drink for
us this afternoon" said Rockaway, sug.
gestingly.
"The only reason that l have been tenn
! persnca," said Mr.. Broker, was that l
feared my wife would tell this story about
me and make me ridiculous. 1t has hung
over me like bad dream. Now if tell
you the story it will kill the penalty, and 1
may take a drink
THAT sounds faipys' said Roskaway.
well, then, it was this way" said Mr..
Broker. The summer colony on Long Is
land, where we have the misfortune to be
located this year, contains all unusual num-
Der Of cranks. They object to fellows 60
ing into saloon. | seldom 60 into saloon
anyway, and, knowing the strength OF public
feeling down there, never went near a "a.
loon until week ago.
Il had to 60 downtown in the evening,
and as | passed the only gilded saloon in
the place it occurred to me suddenly that
wanted drink. | wanted it very much.
| looked behind me. There was no one in
sight. The coast was clear ahead, and
lodged in, feeling like culprit. After the
first drink thought | ought to take an.
other to pay for the risk | ran in coming in.
The second made me bold, and was about
to walk out when | caught sight OF the
parson coming down the street. | lodged
back again, and to allay the bartender's
suspicious ordered third drink.
"The parson had stopped to talk to one
of his wardens almost in front OF the sd.
loon. | loafed around few minutes and
took another drink. There is no use in going
into details, but it seemed to me that there
was procession OF people passing that sa.
loon until midnight. l was caught there
and | made the best Of it. A middle aged
man Of family could not afford being seen
coming out OF such place, and | stayed.
by ten o'clock | was calling the bar.
tender Billy and at II l told him the story
of my life. We both wept over it in spots.
At ll:30 had run 500 margin of his up to
10000 by my system of playing the mar.
kets. You can imagine how much crooked
the elbow to get to that state. At mid.
night we sang college songs and Goodby
My Lover, Good by
ut was somewhat after one clock when
Billy and walked to my house. We did not
meet neighbor, and | congratulated both
Of US many times It took me some time to
60 upstairs, because did not want to arouse
Mrs. Broker and the servants curiosity.
Mrs. Broker was awake when entered the
bedroom and carelessly dropped my shoes
on the floor explained why had been
forced to stay with Billy until after one
o'clock
every consderate of you, l am sure
said my wife, just like that.
"l knew you would appreciate it,
said I.
Then I sat down and wondered why I
felt 80 uncomfortable. At the end Of ten
minutes it occurred to me that needed
some ice water.
There is no ice water upstairs, said my
wife, but you know where to find the 70.
frigerator. Go down and get some ice
"Our bedroom is on the third floor, so
that We may have the ocean breeze |
spent long time on that trip down. 1t
$ emed 10 me that fell over every chair
in the house before reached the ground
floor. My mood became somber. | thought
OF ghost stories and burglars. | was not a
bit gay. At last felt my way to the ice
box, opened the lid and stuck my hand in
to grope for the ice pick,
Something cold grabbed my hand 1
let loose shrek and put my other hand
in. This also was seized The grips tight.
ensd, and l think must have had mild
attack Of Mysteries. I yelled and cried and
laughed. l was in a panic. When some
one lighted the gas found surrounding me
my wife, the coachman and two Of the
maids. Blinking once or twice to clear my
sight. looked cautiously into the ice chest
whore my hands were imprisoned. Then I
lifted my hands out. and there, dangling to
each one, was miserable half frozen crab.
Probably it was funny, but the chorus
of laughter that greeted me hurt me. 1t
was all right for my wife to laugh. but did
not approve Of the servants laughing at me.
1t was some servants fault, anyway. Such
things as crabs ought not to be left around
carelessly. My nervous system received a
shock from which it did not recover
quickly.
"Thenext morning felt 50 sheepish that
I did not go down to breakfast. My wife
laughed very much at short intervals. l did
not like it. knew that If she told the story
I would never hear the last of it. told
her that if the story did not get out would
not drink again until September Is, when
we were back to town. The story is out
now, however, and I'll take whisky sour
to begin with, and then another little
later."--N. Y. Sun.
A Boys Essay on Water.