The San Francisco call., 1901-11-24

sentence, but one must pe wary or assum-
ing that it is untranslatable. 1t is bad
form to use foreign expressions unless
they be idiomatic and pronounced with
correct accent.
1t is now a well-estabished and ac-
cepted canon of good form that only
pleasant things are to be said of any one.
An ill-natured criticism is social blum
der as well as moral one. Though we
speak with the tongues of men and of
angels, and have not charity, it profiteth
us nothing''-in good society.
Gossip and Exaggeration.
Gossip, too, is really going out of fash
ion ANY one self-convicted haStens to
retract whatever may give the impress
sion that one has INDUCED in anything so
vulgar and plebeian. 1t has corrective
and an inspiring influence to imagine the
persons spoken of to be within hearing.
Exaggeration is misstatement, which is
untruthfulness. 1t often does as much
harm as deliberate lie. and is not as
honest.
True wit is a gift, not an attainment
Those who use it Alright never yield to the
temptation of saying anything that can
wound another in order to exhibit their
own cleverness. 1t is natural and spon-
tGneous. 'Those who run after wit are
apt to catch nonsense" Talk that has
heartiness in it and the liveliness, and
sparkle that come of light-heartedness
and innocent gayety is a fairly good sub
stitute for wit.
Talk That Influences.
It is a form of influence to pass on in
conversation whatever one has read or
to others. Many an important resolve
taken in the course of ones life has been
greatly Influenced by what one has heard
in chance conversation.
and kindness without advertising our
motive sounding a trumpet before us.
lead the conversation away from scandal
and innuendo into channels pure and
pcaceable "Out CT the abundance of the
heart the mouth Observation-Disclosures the
source must be right. Fearlessly but
never aggressivey should we defend our
convictions and "show our colors.'
a school, but a playground where people
meet to exchange ideas and forget their
work and their worries. Most of them
have to work hard in some way other
and need relaxation.
The Early Stages of Conversation.
The preliminary stages Of conversation
offer the principal ditficulty-"the dread
Of silence makes us mute" The weather
seems to have perennial interest Why
may not one treasure a few bits of Stor-
les aprOpOS of that much-Worn topic to
be brought out upon occasion? For in
stance, some one speaks of the variable
tell of the lady whose physician advised
for her change of climate. "Why, doc
tor. you forget that I am a New York
woman; l never have anything but
changes!' was her rejoinder At least it
: is better than mere acquescence, and
when people have laughed together the
ones tongues end some trifiing things
of interest on various subjects, but the
supply needs frequent renewal.
Conversation at Dinners.
There are. moments. when the embar-
rassment of silence is relieved by the
knowledge that nothing but the Veriest
commonplaces are expected. When a host
ess has paired her guests before a din
ner and each man seeks the woman as
signed to him he usually says: IT be-
lieve that l am to have the pleasure of
taking you in to dinner" and she has
but to bow and smile while accepting his
arm, and may say in voice of perfume
tory politeness: II am very glad" or if
she wish to be very complimentary may
venture II am fortunate"
1t is usually the man who takes the
initiative and the woman who bears the
burden of the conversation. On the way
TO the dining room they may improve
the occasion or not, as they please. There
is sometimes an awkward pause at the
beginning of the meal before the company
seem to have adapted themselves to their
surroundings and to each other. A host
set the ball rolling, perhaps with some
thing OF interest treasured for the Occa-
sion.
Each person at table should endeavor
to make himself or herself agreeable to
both neighbors, as opportunity serves.
General conversation is only possible
where there are few present Talk is
usually then at its best and brightest.
One with very humble powers, in the
kindled by sympathy with the subject
discussed, surprises himself not less than
others by unsuspected eloquence. Those
who have the reputation of being good