Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1901-02-07
ATCHisON GLOBE SIGHTS
Com meuts on Everyday Matters BY an
Original Genius.

Original Genius.
Those who don't impose on you, flpd
fault with you.
You can do anything in this woNd
without grammar except teach schosi.
An ugly baby seems to realize its mis-
fortune; an ugly baby is nearly always
good.
People have not outlived the age Of
romance so long as it is still possible
to fool them.
What Il great lot OF good space for
advertising on the back OF tOmbstOneS
that is never used.
sympathy is easy to get. but when
you need help. you will find that rs q
different question.
You talk IL great deal about the i'm
portance of Truth. DO you know the
truth about yourself!
People have so few occasions to be
proud of kin that they overdo 1t when
they do get chance.
During the progress Of every breach
Of promise case it occurs to us that all
love letters are much alike.
The women talk Of the difficulty Of
catching up with their work, as II their
work ran like scared wolf.
There isn't anything in a druggists
perfume case that smells as good a.
chill sauce when it is cooking.
When a mother admits fault In ono
Of her children. she is reminded that 1t
takes some after its father"
When an old pastor resigns. and =
new one breaches his initial sermon.
the attendance is always large.
When man stays up late these
nights. he tries the excuse on his wife
that he was kidnapped and got away.
A man takes off his coat when he
wants to whip his rival; n girl makes
the strings Of her corset Il little tighter.
1t is every woman's complaint that
her husband gives the most desirable
part of the chicken to the wrong guest.
Up to the time girl is 20 she hasn't
fully decided if she will be fro9en
statue, or a coy and clinging woman.
Every time doctor cures woman
patient he is assured Of one drummer
who will work for him forever without
charge.
There never was wOman's resOlu-
ton to work hard that could resist
stopping to eat peanuts or look at .
love story.
When married couple starts out to
do light housekeeping it means that
they expect to get half Of their living
at mothers"
The guests after wedding are not
raving over the bride as she imaglnes:
they are all grumblng, Il don't see
how they can afford it,
1t is a mistake. from a woman's
standpoint. to make the dining room
table too long for her to reach her hus-
bands legs under it with her foot.
Parson Irvine says every gentleman
is smart. without exception: man
can't he gentleman unless he is smart.
Every lady will also be found inteili-
gent.
When a woman Is away from home
she does not care particularly for leng
letters from her husband. but likes to
receive them as an evidence Of coed
faith.
We have noticed that kidnappers
never carry off a married man: prOba-
bly, they realize that no one would give
a quarter to have married man
brought back.
Whenever the women see woman
in n carriage ut funeral who has -
be famed. they are perfectly satisfied
that she was good wife, and that her
grief is sincere.
Railroad men say leg or an arm OF
does not count with railroad man In
throwing dice. But II the railroad man
has one or more fingers of he can A.
ways throw high dice. II a railroad
man has nothing but thumb. nothing
can beat him. although O man with .
thumb and one finger Is close second