davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12
Some British Title. Are Che ap.

The generous distribution of titles and
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES threatens to make
every Englishnan distinguished" in the
near future. There are several so-called
learned societies which are more or
less clubs, and admit almost all candi-
dates who are willing to pay the trif1ing
subscription, and many of them author
ize their members to add descriptive let.
tiers to their names. To be fellow"
or member" of such societies does not
imply that he who is the one or the other
is learned" in the particular science or
art which the institution is named after,
but merely that he pays the subscription
required. 1t is time that the Govern
ment should interfere in the wholesale
manufacture of bogus fellows and
members the more so that some of the
societies alluded to are allowed to use the
word royal" in describing themselves.
1t is to be hoped that attention will be
called to this matter in the House of
Commons, because therapeutic for titles
is growing with unwholesome rapidity in
this country, and it should be restrained
within reasonable limits-London Truth.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

Anarchism, or the extreme radicalism
which amounts to the same thing prac-
tically, is again in evidence in Europe
in the recent attacks upon the Kaiser
and the Gear and in the close watch
kept upon the movements of the King
of Italy. As to the latter 1t may be
said that Italy is now merely reaping
what she has sown. To so back no
farther than 1856, when on the sth Of
December that year Agesilao Aiilano
darted from the ranks while Ferdinand
II. was reviewing his troops at Naples
and thrust his bayonet into the King,
1t will be seen Italy entered upon the
career which now makes SO uneasy the
tenure Of her sovereigns. Nfilano was
sentenced to death and executed few
days after his deed, but not many Year,
afterward, under King Victor Emman-
uel, monument was erected to Age
silao Milano and the King himself was
present at the dedication. Milano was
described us patriot Of the old Ro-
man type and all honor was paid to his
memory. The shortsightedness of this
course is now visited upon Victor EN-
manuel's descendant on the throne,
while King Humbert's death by the
hand Of m assassin at Monza was a
retributiye form Of Justice. slow but
inevitable as fate. Not only did Italy
erect monument to an assassin, but
King murderers or would-be assassins
in other countries received from at
least portion Of the italian people a
generous need of applause and admit
ration and most Of these same assassins
or would-be King destroyers in France
have been Of Italian birth or origin. AZ
to Germany the situation is different
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12
She and the Hog.

Into the hands of an elderly matron
Of much dignity and some distinction
came. not long ago. the diary kept by
her father, worthy but imperfectly
literate farmer of remote country vii
lage. With cluster of her own chill
dren gathered about her and peeping
over her shoulder, she turned the faded
leaves of the little volume containing
the records Of the year in which she
was born, and paused finally at the day
Of her birth. This is what she read:
"Nov. II killed the hogg the scales
bruk wen whaying SO do not MOVIE ex-
act wayt but he was very fine hogg
darter Loisa b. ~ pounds"
1t was not an entry to enhance the
self-esteem of "darter Loisa," perhaps.
but 1t is one now often hilariously QUOT
ed by her children and never resented
by herself, even though 1t rclegates so
Enthusiastically to second place after the
hog in the ancestral annals, such a
tribe as the advent of baby not heavy
enough to break any scales. or merit q
commendatory adjective.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12
Washing n wild Tiger

A story copied from LA France du
Nord" illustrates the lengths to which
perfect fearlessness may carry man.
The famous lion-tamer Pezon hired at
Moscow poor Cossack, who was as
ignorant of the French language as of
fear, to clean the cages Of his wild
beasts.
Instructions were given to the man
by means of gestures and dumb show,
and apparently he thoroughly under
stood what he was expected to do.
The next morning he began his new
duties by entering with bucket. sponge
and broom. not the cage of n tame
beast. but that of splendid untamed
tiger, which lay asleep upon the floor.
The fierce animal awoke and fixed his
eyes upon the man. who calmly pro-
ceeded to wet his large sponge. and.
unterrified, to approach the tiger.
AT this moment Pezon saw what was
going OH, and was struck with horror.
Any sound or motion on his part would
increase the danger of the situation by
rousing the beast to fury; SO lie quietly
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

military telegraph operator, and was
stationed with the headquarters of the
Fifth Army Corps at Fort Petersburg,
Va. He served through the war, and
when the struggle ended he settled at
Raleigh, N. @.
The young operator was restless, and
saw in the West the opportunity for
advancement which the East seemed to
deny him. He Joined the Collins over
land telegraph expedition, formed for
the purpose of building line overland
from San Francisco to the mouth of
the Amoer river in Siberia. He was
stationed at Ployer Bay in Siberia for
over year. In the fall of 1867 Mr..
Sabin returned to San Francisco, and
for several years was an operator in
the employ of the Western Union. be-
ing stationed at Salt Lake, Helena and
other places. Since then lie has grad
ually risen to his present position.
1t has been his principle to make the
telephone popular and profitable by
making 1t so cheap as to be within
the reach of all. He has achieved this
result by establishing various classes
of service, ranging in price from $1.50
to So monthly. AS n result of this pol
icy there are about five times MS many
telephones on the sparsely settled Pa
cific coast as there are in the densely
populated middle West.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12
Fact and Fiction.

Mr.. jenkins, on returning home in the
evening, was pleased to find that the
heavy snow, which had fallen during
the day had been carefully shoveled
from the front walk.
"Who did 1t, Lucy7" he asked.
II was about to tell you," replied his
wife. II never put in such day in
my life. I've been basieged by whole
army Of men. all wanting to clean that
walk. They drove mo absolutely crazy.
The snow was falling like great guns
all the time. too. AZ soon as 1t quit,
though, gave the JOB to poor man
who was perfect living skeleton.
There wasn't n thing Of him but skin
and bone"
"Lucy." Interrupted Mr.. jenkins,
with groan, you're reading these
popular historical novels again"
why do you say that7"
Because you've contracted the his.
torical novel disease. can't tell where
your fact leaves of and your fiction
begins"
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12
Jack Was ALWAYS Free.


A day or so ago sailor entered q
well known bank in Hull Having got
fairly inside he hailed the clerk with:
what cheer, matey? How's your
business doing, hcy!"
The clerk, who was all things to all
men, replied blandly that business was
not SO brisk, but doubtless would i'm
prove, and asked the briny one what
lie could do for him.
Out came a check from the tar's
pocket, PAY to bearer 91OO," and he
handed 1t to the clerk with chuckle.
"That's the fruits of being a steady
young man, an there's more where that
came from, for I've had several years
cruising round Chiny, and not for moth
Ing"
After scanning the check the clerk
asked the usual inquiry: How will
you have 1t, sir?"
The, salt hesitated moment, then
leaned over the counter and said in a
hoarse whisper: "Well, matey, don't
want to be hard on yer. Gimme ten
pun now. and I'll take the rest pun
a week. London Tit-Bits.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

The recent resignation Of Methodist
minister in Chicago because he believ-
ed he. could not maintain his family
properly on his salary of 5000 a year
has aroused general discussion as to
whether or not such atsalary is suffi-
cient for any preacher. The question,
says the Chicago Tribune, is like that
other foolish one as to whether or not
a man can marry safely on 500 week.
The answer In each case depends upon
the attendant circumstances. 1t is
useless to attempt to genefelize on
questions of this kind. To most coun-
try preachers an annual income of 5000
q year would be almost opulence. Many
Of them manage to live and even to
raise families on less than $500 q year.
On the other hand, DIR. RainsfDrd of
New York recently complained in
public speech that a preacher who
reaches the top of his profession cannot
hope to get more than "a paltry $1O,
600 year." He was looking at the
matter from the viewpoint of the pros
porous lawyer. or merchant. or manu-
facturer. The question is one whose
answer depends upon the point of view
and also upon the circumstances of tile
individualcase. A salary of 5000 may
afford comfortable living for an I'M
married preacher, while 1t may be pain
fully insufficient for one with wife
and family. The size of minister's
salary should be gauged to some ex-
tent by the social standing of his con-
gregation. Ministers have to live up
to their people. Their children should
be dressed rs we'll as those of the av-
erage parishioner, and their homes
should be furnished according to stand
ards that will not cause comment when
they are visited by members of their
congregations. A man whip ministers
to congregation of poor workingmen
does not need as large salary as one
who presides over a wealthy and styl-
ish church. The two positions require
totally different standards of living,
and $500 might suffice for the one
while $4,000 might scarcely be too
much for the other. 1t is impossible to
flx definite minimum or maximum in
the pay of all ministers. Such an at.
tempt would be as futile. as to try to
measure preachers work by his sal
ary.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12
vEaTHlLo COUSIN EXTRAORDINARY.
The Astonishing Performance Given by
Sothern's confederates on the Roof

Sothern's Confederates on the Roof.
One of the peculiarities of Actor -Soth-
ern's elaborated jokes was the way in
which he worked up to them. He pre-
tended to have accidentally discovered
that he possessed the gift of the born
ventriloquist, and arranged an expert
nlent on the occasion of supper party
given in his honor at pleasant houserin
a London suburb. There was foolish
kind of hanger-on of Sothern's, who
loved to boast of his intimacy with the
famous comedian He had often said,
Il wish YOU would let me help you in
one of your practical jokes, Mr.. Soth-
ern." Sothern hunored his desire. Mr..
Edgar Pemberton tells the story in his
Memoir of Sothron."
The comedy must, for my. purpose,
pc reduced to a-paragraph. You know
how. fond the professional ventriloquist
IS OF talking up the chimney to an inag-
mary man on the roof Sothern had ar
ranged for his slavish confederate to
mount the roof by a ladder and play the
part of the voice on the roof, which he
did to perfection, land Sothern's success
as a ventriloquist was voted nothing
short of marvellous Supper being over,
the party adjourned to another room.
at which point Sothern said Good
night" to his friend above, at which cue
it had been arranged that the seancc
should be concluded Sothern had,
however, plotted against his man, who,
when he wished to descend, found that
the ladder was gone. BY hook or by
crook the deceived confederate found
his way to the chimney of the smoking
room, where the supper party were set
ting down for a long evening Present
ly a voice was heard calling down the
chimney, "Sothern! Sothernl For
heavens sake come and help ME can't
get down, and its raining like madl'
Sothern was taken aback for moment
but only to be in ecstasies the next at the
EXPLANATIONS of his friends, who con-
sidered the voice only another example
Of Sothern's skill. "You said you could
do no more, your voice was tired, and
here it is stronger than everl' Sothern
accepting the compliments of his friends
managed in short conversation with the
voice on the roof, to let his unhappy con-
federate understand that as soon as pos.
sible he would go ott and help him
down. After time, just when Sotherr
was about to slip out and release hi.
friend, his host went to the chimney and
all the more to emphasize Sothern's sue.
cess. as he thought, called out Are yor
still therel' This was the last straw
upon the rain-d renched back of the suf-
ferer. ooh, go to blazesT came til.
angry reply, and with it piece Of NOR
tar that ratified in the CRATE, you're {
bcast!"-The People.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

1t is modern doctrine of wide and
constantly wider acceptance that the
greatest nations must not 60 to war
with each other. The new Titans of
finance In this country must submit
themselves to the same canon of reason
or ways will be found to make them
submit. The powers they WELD are so
vast that their use under the condi-
tons Of rage. and blazing rivalry is in
evitably accompanied by injury to 9TH
er persons than the immediate combat
ants. In short, 1t may be said that q
pile Of cash measuring some hundreds
Of millions is impressed with a public
interest and may not be employed like
mere pocket money at the caprice and
liking Of Its owners.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12
prenariu. to nli,k cuba.

When Senator Platt talks about 1t is
morally incumbent" on the United
States In the case of Cuba lie is de-
ceiving no one, not even himself. If
the Cubans accept his amendment 1t
will not be because they believe such
a yielding will procure them any fay-
.ors here. 1t will be simply and solely
because they are convinced that the
surrender is unavoidable. The mere
command of power like this is equiv
alent to the use Of force, and even the
independents grasp at the amendment
now avoid the alternative of annex
alton.
Prospective reciprocity may seem to
be factor In the matter. but II a reso-
luton Of Congress can be construed
out Of Its plain meaning what do
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

with the greatest relish. Then back he
slips into the water to watch for the
next traveller along that way. He will
keep this up until his hunger is salts
fed. This Indulgence ruins the hogs
for pork, however, asqit gives it n
"fishy" taste, and no one will buy it.
That is the reason the farmers keep
their hogs as far from the streams as
Dossible ~
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12
Rode with Hanna.

The inaupnro tion Of the Emperor Of
all the Philippines is n thing of the
dead past II is not the policy Of The
Gun to deal in ancient history, but We
simply call attention to the ominous
fact that the man Of Mark. the Supreme
High Pie Peddler. of the kingdom rode
In the inaugural parade with Mack. II
has ALWAYS been customary for the re.
firing executive to ride with the incom.
ING President Rut tint WAS when we
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

Lord Hugh Cecil who Irish demonstration in the House of Com
called Prime Minister'S looked
He Cecil
Hatfield
old.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12
Little Blanche i, Medita.iye,

Blanche is the little fve-year-old
daughter of an East Side newspaper
man. She has lately been meditating on
the problems of existence. Yesterday
she got something in her throat which
caused her TO cough. When she got
through she said: II guess will cough
my head off some day." Then she went
on: IF | should cough my head off,
papa, would God make me new one p
Her papa answered: Il am afraid not.
/ never heard Of such case"
She pursued her thought step fur
ther and said: Il suppose it would be
Just as cheap for him to make whole
baby as to make just head" Her
father answered that he thought it
would.-Cleveiand Leader.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12
The Shin sub,idx B,,,.

Senator Frye will reintroduce the
Hanna Payne ship subsidy bill as soon
as the Fifty-seyenth Congress meets
in December. The Senator is now at
work on the bill, which will be entire
~ remodeled.
AS 1t was framed in the last Congress
the subsidy bill was so complicated
that few men In either house Of Con-
gress thoroughly understood 1t. Sena-
tor Frye will simplify 1t aud make It
much easier to understand.
The measure is to contain all the
provisions of the old bill, hut ID to be
much shorter. Whether 1t will be so
framed as to give subsidies to the ships
recently purchased by Mr.. j. Plerpont
Morgan upon the construction Of an
ecual tonnage in American shipyards
is a question which will probably not
be determined until 1t is considered by
the Senate committee on commerce and
the House committee ON merchant ma
rines and Notwithstanding Democ-
racy.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

vague assurances of ,friendliness ON
the part of a single Senator amount tor
Should the Cubans pretend to take
them seriously it would only be for
the somewhat sterile satisfaction Of
piling up the morals" to make them
artistically complete. They would
know as well as any; American politi-
CHM that the practical side Of the
question was left untouched. Its im-
port. however. is not mystery. It
was quite apparent when the National
Cigar Leaf Association decided to lob
by against any concession whatever
to Cuba.
The undeniable fact is that certain
interests in this country propose to
milk Cuba. II we control the island
under the Plat amendment they will
oppose reciprocity. II we annex the
island they will oppose free trade. They
have no thought of uniform laws, and
IL they believed that annexation would
bring them about they would thrpng
the corridors of the Capitol to prevent
any such consummation. The kind OF
annexation which they might favor
would leave Cuba outside the Consti-
tuition and under unequal laws made
in Washington. This would be an
ideal condition from their standpoint
and particularly advantageous for the
milking process. -
1t is evident. therefore, why the Gu
ban radicals prefer the amendment to
annexation, whatever they may think
of the chances of reciprocity. The de.
velopments incline them to keep as
clear as possible from the dictation Of
the hostile interests here Chicago
Record Herald.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

The State Legislatures have been di.
viding the respective States into con-
gressional districts. The law under
which they are acting calls for dis
tricts made of contiguous and compact
territory, and containing as nearly as
practicable an equal number Of inhab-
itants. The Legislatures should, in
fair play, live up to the spirit of this
law, even II the ways Of enforcing Its
letter are shrouded in some uncer.
tainty.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

Roumania would appear to be the
most .illiteratc country in Europe. The
last census shows that in population
of nearly 100000, nearly 100000 can
neither read nor write, and that only
little over 100000 have any education
Mt all
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

manned but three months in this POSI-
ton, being transferred to White Plains
and from there to New York, where he
became night operator on the Western
press lines of the United States Tele-
graph Company.
In 1864 Sabin entered the army as
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

A little German doctor in Philadel-
phia cures badness by injecting little
bichloride Of gold under the scalp. This
makes the ,bald-headed microbes quit
work and the hair comes up again like
crop Of weeds after gentle rain.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

An eastern specialist snys that
wooden-legged man does not have grip.
Perhaps not. sbut the general public
will feel more sure of the statement
that he does not suffer from corns.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

What the average American editor
doesn't know about kissing must be
very little, II one may Judge from the
wealth Of information on the subject
which has been drawn out by Prof.
CROOKS alleged remark that he never
kissed woman.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12
waited till the need should arise to rush
To the mans assistance

waited I'LL the need should arise TO rush
to the mans assistance.
The monjik, sponge in hand, ap-
preached the animal, and perfectly
fearless, proceeded to rub him down,
as If he had been horse or a dog;
while the tiger, apparently delighted
by the application of cold water, rolled
over on its back, stretched out Its paws,
purred, and offered every part of its
body to the moujik, who washed him
us complacently as a mother battles
her infant.
Then he left the cage, and would have
repeated the hazardous experiment
upon another savage from the desert
had not Pezon with difficulty drawn
him off.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

That girl who wanted to commit sui
eide because she couldn't sit up after
midnight with her sweetheart, should
marry him. Then she might have a
chance of sitting up long after mid
night for him.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

N a lie ndcof He Americana sfot
lg than an
ship ht re Incl Her secondary willie
m % ZEE oOtnsae 1skntsm mhoae
lppy2O cargo agm mmandn gomcr itenw romom
junior VI a officer Ii uspdhe Ohwnet
o Her
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

Parliament Will allow King Edward
only $780, 900 a year for his personal
use. He will now have to give up any
hopes he may have had Of being able to
train with ]. Pierpont Morgan's set.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

and In that country, apparently. an up,
Proclamation is being made to the state
of agitation and feeling In Russia
which for nearly half century has
practically made the Cars prisoners
In their palaces, not knowing whom to
trust.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

The superstitious in England are wor-
I ried because a marble shaft fell out Of
Westminster Abbey. As the abbey has
been standing for 600 years, 1t can be
excused for wanting to lie down.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

Archimedes said: "Givc me full
crum for my lever and Ill lift the
world" Banker Morgan says: "Give
me purchase on anything English and
It's NINE"
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

The titled foreigner who marrles
Hetty Green's daughter for the purpose
of getting her money will have to deal
with one of the severest cases of grip
on record.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

II the new scheme for killing mos
quitoes by freezing them with liquid
air proves; to be failure we shall
strongly recommend boiling them.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

Now there is to be an abstract trust.
There is already n concrete combina-
ton. The ground is now thoroughly
covered.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

stingless bees have been found in the
West Indies. The little West Indians,
when they visit this country and try to
impose on our busy bee, will get badly
fooled.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

Let nobody be surprised at the lead
ing nations laying such stress on the
extension of their commerce. There
was q time when the people Of the
world depended on one boat.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1901-06-12

President Mckinley hints that .
panic may soon be due and counsels
prudence. He evidently thinks 1t best
tosget 1t over and be done with 1t be-
fore another election comes around.