davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-03-31
A Wild Ride.

When / was younger man than
ever will be again." said the professor
with three-story head and eyeglasses
of the telescope order, 81 was the vic
tim of such intense mental abstraction
that | removed myself entirely from
the world of practical affairs. l was in
the boundless realms of thought and
paid but fieeting attention to the active
field of human action. 1t was neces-
sary to notify me when should attend
my classes, eat my meals, and even
when I should retire.
Il was at one time requested TO lee
ture in a New England village, and
agreed to do so. The theme was one
that had received my best thoughts
and the mere prospect of delivering it
was a physical pleasure. When | ar
rived at the depot my thoughts were
concentrated upon the prepared ad-
dress. / realized that my train was
an hour late and that | must hurry
out beyond the mere fact of hurrying
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-03-31

ssYes. m willing 70 90 that The
moral IS: Beware q sellshness, lest
you be hoist with yon own Iyddite
shell. 1t all happened up at my town
last fall Theresa widow living there,
who has three daughters. very esti-
mable young ladies', but, alas, the two
older are exceedingly selfish. They are
both somewhat farther along in life
than the average unmarried woman
/ don't know how old they are-I
hope I'm too much of gentleman
to know anything about lady's age
but just for the sake of the story
We'll call one of them slightly over
thirty and the other slightly under.
The third daughter I'm willing to
come out boldly and call twenty
were on safer ground when we get
down in that neighborhood, you know.
And better yet, this girl is one of the
most unselfish creatures in the world.
She is, in fact, a most charming girl
in every way, with a pretty face and
quiet, unassuming manner which
never fails to win with its simple
charm. If she has any failing it is
that of too great humility and incli-
nation to allow herself to be imposed
upon. But probably this has been
brought about largely by her being
constantly domineered over by her
older sisters. There is, | believe, a sort
of unwritten law among women that
daughters must marry in rotation ac-
cording to age, though instances of
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-03-31

| rebellious younger sisters who marry
| but certainly in this case Dorothy,
which We'll name the youngest, had
not the least idea of ever doing any
| thing so improper. 1t might seem to
her that her older sisters had had a
| fair chance, and that they were I'M
considerably long in getting out of the
way, but still she was patient and
willing to wait
Indeed, Dorothy was very closely
| looked after by her mother and older
sisters, and little opportunity was
ever given her even remotely to con-
template the idea of marriage. 1t was
not until last fall till anything in the
guise of man was allowed to APP
proach within Mailing. distance. Then
| she was given the privilege of receiv-
| ing some circumspect calls from
neighboring young man named Harry
Lambert. He is one of the best young
fellows in town, only a year or two
| older than Dorothy and desirable in
every way. During the fall he was ac-
customed to drop around Sunday even
ing and spend an hour with Dorothy
on the front porch or sitting on a
bench under a tree on the lawn Her
mother approved. though the older sis
| tiers were accustomed to sheer and to
question the propriety of the proceed
ings.
Though you must not gather that
the older girls had no attention-far
| from it. Mr.. Edward Edgewater has
been regularly paying court to Eliza
beth. the oldest, for a humber of years.
Mr.. William jackson has been doing the
same by Ruth the second daughter.
don't know why, but the progress OF
Messrs. Edgewater and Jackson has
been exceedingly slow. They have call
ed with clock-like regularity every
| Sunday evening, but the joyous we'd
| ding bells have refused to ring
| so during the fall things ran on as
l have indicated, each of the young
men finding happiness in the lady OF
his choice every Sunday evening. But
With the approach of cold weather the
| prospect for Dorothy changed. The
porch or the lawn were all very well
under the soft influence of the harvest
moon-perhaps preferable to any Other
| place-but the austere November moon
is another thing. Right here l ought
| to mention that the widows house
| though comfortable, is far from large
1t accommodated Elizabeth and Ruth
very pleasantly for counting purposes
but there was really no place for an
other. So there was nothing for Dor
othy but to throw herself on the gen,
crosby of the others. and beg them tt
share with her. since Sunday evening
Was the only time that Harry coult
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-03-31
DOROTHY'S DILEMMA.


Author of 1.-THE Picture of Agnes" Cash
Capital of Sunset City, Etc.
Copyright, 1900. Daily Story Pub. Coz
1t was the Dominie's turn to tell a
story.
Cor you can sing song if you pre-
fer suggested the Judge with a suave
air.
''Or, dare say you would accept a
cake-walk,' returned the Dominic, as
he arched his eyebrows and looked
around at the company.
WED prefer it," said the Colonel
promptly. I'll touch up the piano
with a little rag-time."
Il refuse to crafty your scandalous
wishes" replied the Dominic stoutly.
''I'H not only tell story, but III see
that there is a moral tackled on as be-
comes one Of my CLOTH
Cant you give us the moral first,
then We won't have to be dreading
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-03-31
VERY INAPPROPRIATE.
Why the Lawyers Address to Cook
ing school Graduates Was Not
Received With Enthusiasm.

Why the Lawyers Address to Cook
ing school Graduates Was Not
Received With Enthusiasm.
The real cynic is always man with
a history, and this is true Of com
Paratiyely young Pittsburg lawyer,
who views all sweet girl graduates
with unnatural distrust This isn't the
commencement season. but it required
several months for this story to leak
out. The attorney, who is a gifted
speaker. was invited to make an adj
dress to the graduating class OF a
training school for nurses in town
not more than good days walk from
Pittsburg.
For his subject he selected a general
theme. embracing as much of medical
Jurisprudence as he thought the pro-
fession of the girls required them to
known He was on hand promptly
legged out in full dress suit and
adorned by rosebud. He went to the
hall as directed by the hotel clerk and
the master of ceremonies beekoned him
to ascend the platform The former
had met him previously during the
progress of trial at the court house
in that town.
In due season the lawyer was asked
If he would make few remarks
The Pittsburger thought that was q
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-03-31

ie.z Ill 1lIs ~.
beh nrst - I'D III - before her,
and ask5d for 10 - u the parlor oc-
casionally perhaps once month The
older girl proved colder than the No
yember moon, She replied in effect
that she was in the habit of entertain
ing Mr.. Edgewater. in the parlor each
Sunday evening and that she had no in
tention Of giving it up for chit who
ought to be in short dresses. Hardly.
Dorothy had better go back to her
dolls.
Poor Dorothy wiped her eyes and
sought Ruth. This lady was. dumbfound-
ed The idea! She was accustomed to
see Mr.. Jackson in the dining room
each Sunday evening, and she thought
she saw herself giving up to mink who
ought to be wearing her hair in long
braird. Oh, yes! Dorothy had better go
back to her dolls
Dorothy had quiet little cry, then
she bethought her of Maggie. The kitch-
en- was not just the place to receive Har-
ry, but-any port in the storm; so she
sought out Maggie. The loikes of that.
Well, I never. And me in the habit of
receiving Afficer Donovan here livery SUM-
day noight, with the eonsint of the mis-
sus. And him a proper young man and
on this beat, and that his only noighf off.
Indade, Ofll not. Orll give notice first.
It's a wonder that Miss Dorothy don't
go back to her dous,''
Poor Dorothy, She retired to her own
room and had a good cry. Fate was
against her; there was no hope. 1t was
Saturday; the evening paper predicted a
cold wave. There was little touch of
snow on the ground the next morning.
Dorothy cried some more. This was real
ly all there was left for her to do.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-03-31

But that evening Harry came. He had
feared the worst, and was provided with
his winter overcoat and a pair of Heavy
goloshes. Dorothy put on her winter
cloak and took her muff and together
they spent an hour tramping briskly up
and down the path beside the house.
Their teeth chartered considerably, but
they managed to carry on a conversation,
and to some purpose, as appeared subse-
quently. At the end of the hour Harry
said good night at the front steps, passed
out of the gate. sneezed furiously three
times and hurried home.
1.-The next afternoon Dorothy and Har-
ry called at my house. Harry asked me
to marry them then and there. Dorothy
told their story, and explained that hey
had not intended to be married for a
couple of years, mainly out of regard for
the feelings of her sisters, but that now
there was nothing for them but to be
married or give each other up, which
they could never, never do. So l married
them.
THE marriage, l heard, produced some
excitement in the widows household.
Elizabeth and Ruth are reported to have
said things, especially when they got a
note from Dorothy while away on a lit
tie three-days wedding tour, asking
them please to look after her dolls, and
see that they were fed regularly and put
to bed at seven O'Clock. Messrs. Edge
water and Jackson We're also said to have
been rendered thoughtful by the occur
renee; and when met Officer Donovan
on his beat the next day l noticed he
seemed pre-occupied, SO if you haven t
forgotten my moral you see where it
comes in. Be generous. AT least, don't
be too selfish"
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-03-31
Vaccination and Juxtaposition.

Vaccination and JuxtapositioB.
con my right arm" said the sweet
young thing.
The physician who was arranging
the vaccine points looked surprised.
The mother. who was supervising the
proceeding, seemed even more aston
ished.
you mean your left arm. Clara, u
she asserted
mo, don't mean my left arm an
swered the willful girl.
But it will annoy you so much less
on your left ARM" insisted the mother.
The girl blushed but shook her head.
.'Cou don't understand" she said.
Il confess | don't" admitted the
mother.
Very likely that is because you were
not vaccinated at time when you
were engaged to be married" suggest
ed the girl. Harold has been vac
cinated on his left arm. so I-er-as a
mere matter of convenience, don't you
see, when you consider the juxtaposi-
ton in some circumstance"
Here the mother and the physician
made mental diagram of the custom
airy situation when two hearts are beat
ing as one and quickly saw that the
girl was exceptionally thoughtful and
-sighted.--Chicago Evening Post.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-03-31

! llll ~ l1lI.
\ 4 Dire -. 1 shouted 70 the dryer
VI ! dinGy 1ooaing vehicle. as 1 sprans
in ana handed him Z s. bill Spare
neither the horse nor whip.
Away Ne went with plunge. The
carriage rolled like ship in the trough
of the sea Street lights seemed like
a torchlight procession moving rapid
ly the other way. Constables shouted,
dogs barked. small boys chased us. and
business ceased that people might
stand on the sidewalk and gaze. Up
one street and down another we dashed
madly. We took corners on two wheels,
grazed telegraph poles and knocked
over such movables as ash barrels and
dry goods boxes.
After half an hour OF this bewilder-
ing experience, i stuck my head out OF
the window and shouted: 'Are we
nearly there? II
Where did yez want to go. sir?'
came the edifying answer. Washing
ton Star.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-03-31


why is woman like an umbrel-
la2" asked the exchange editor.
Because she is made of ribs and at
tacfed to stick" replied the infor-
nation editor. why is"
Wrong. Guess again"
Because she always has to be shut
up when"
Nav, You fatigue me-"
Because she stands In the hall and
---''
Nav. It's nothing about standing
in the hail.
"a woman is like an umbrella be-
cause nobody ever gets the right one
Why is"
ring off! That isn't the answer
either
Its better one than you've got. .
Don't you reckon know whether il
is or not? Whose conundrum is this
yours or miner"
well, she is like an umbrella be-
cause-it isn't because she fades with
age is it?'
.You, ought to be ashamed of your
SELF"
Il am. 1t is because you have 10
put up when cloudy and threatening
no, that can't be it. Because she's q
good thing to have in the house. Why
is --" t.
you're not within four counties OF
1t" -
Because you can't find any pocket
in either. Why is
mo choice. Vote again"
II won't! A woman isn't like an
umbrella There is not the slightest
resemblance. You go on with your
work and let me alone"
Il knew you couldn't guess 1t. It's
because she's accustomed to reign"
~ Then the information editor rose in
his wrath, and they were only pre-
vented from doing mischief to each
other by prompt-and wholly unexpect-
ed-work on the part of the labor ed
itor.-Chicago Tribune. r
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-03-31

had left the hotel, but had failed to
arrive at his destination.
The situation dawned upon the mas
ter of ceremonies in an instant, and
the lawyers address came to a, halt
at the next period. 1t seemed like
good joke, but the attorney couldn't
understand why he got such a decided
frost at the wrong commencement I'M
til one of his new guides explained to
him that he had been addressing the
graduating class of thriving cooking
school.-Pittsburg Times.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-03-31

"Blitherby's restaurant has the slow
est service / ever saw" said the Gentle
man with the Gloomy Brow.
"How's that" asked the individual
with the overworked Smile.
Il ordered some eggs there once, and
had to wait SO leng chat they brought
me -''
'.Chickenss"
mo. Eggs that had been laid by the
chickens Matched from the eggs had
ordered. Baltimore American.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-03-31
THE PRESIDENTS TRIBUTE.
A Scene at the Bier Of the Dead Brit
ish Queen.

ish Queen.
London Times.
Our special correspondent lately at
Windsor writes, under yesterdays
date:
81 observe in to-day's issue OF the
Times message from your New York
correspondent, in which, taking note
of some complaint telegraphed from
England, he says
sit is certain that the President had
every wish to show every possible
mark of respect to the Queens mem
ory.'
Although it is inconceivable that
any one should have doubted that this
was the Presidents intention, / think
the following facts which so far as l
am aware, have not yet been made
known, may serve to silence any fool
ish or malicious rumors which have
gained currency. 1T was my privilege
to visit the Albert Memorial chapel on
the night of Friday last. when the fin
ishing touches were being put to that
beautiful edifice IN which, after the
ceremony on Saturday, the Queens
body was to lie until its removal to
Frogmore Never have 4 seen a more
impressive or a more touching spec
tacle. The chapel, with it's splendid
tombs, was but dimly lighted by
lamps, deep shadows shrouded the ed
ifice in mysterious and solemn gloom
and the silence was unbroken. All
around one saw the most exquisite
wreaths from the most distinguished
people in all parts of the world. For
eign potentates, the services, the regi-
ments of the army the Queen loved so
we'll, were all represented, and the
place was veritable treasure house of
flowers.
'But there was one wreath lying on
the altar steps, very near to the bier
on which the coffin was to rest, which,
by its magnificence and the superb
D6duIy VI IQ0 nOW0FS OIL WHICH II was
composed, would have compelled the
attention of the least observant. On
lifting the corner of the broad satin
ribbon by which the wreath was tied
I saw that this splendid tribute, which
was certainly unsurpassed by any re-
ceived at Windsor, was the offering of
the President of the United States.
Immediately below and adjoining it
was large and lovely cross of white
flowers, bearing the name of the United
States ambassador. AS turned away
it seemed to me and still seems, that
l had looked upon one of the most
beautiful sights that even the funeral
of the Queen has produced; for here,
by the very side of the spot reserved
for her coffin, on the very steps of the
altar, were the tributes of those who
represent the nation to whom we are
more nearly allied by origin, language
and sentiment than any other in the
whole of the wide world"
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-03-31
A Legal Examination.

A Canadian gentleman, Casey by
name, was appointed to a government
place which technically had to be oecu-
pied by a lawyer, which Mr.. Casey was
not. The benchers of the law society,
however, undertook to obviate the tech
nicality. and appointed one of their
number as special examiner to ex-
anime him as to his knowledge of the
law
Well, Casey said the examiner,
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-03-31

TO tell the truth. . replied the can
didate, 7 don't know single thing.
The examiner reported, stating in his
affidavit that he had examined Mr.,
Casey as to his knowledge of the law
and to the best of his information and
belief he had answered the question:
put to him correctly" The a..sirant
was thereupon admitted to the bar
Law Notes. '-f
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-03-31

e. ltIIffs
yiting Nm see1s belore snd bnt AZ
made ono Y III most fetchfns boWinz
and waded into his theme
Young women" be said. syou have
chosen career in which pain and suf-
fering will predominate mot your suf-
fering. but the suffering OF others. I'M
der your care it may be that many will
die, and it is all important for you to
know at the outset not only what you
should do in. the name of humanity,
but also what you must do in the name
of the law.
your possibilities for doing good
are only eQualed by your opportunities
for doing harm. tits not enough that
a physician may be able to. undo the
injury you may have wrought through
carelessness or ignorance, for the oc-
casion may arise when a human life
will pay the penalty OF your negli-
gence.'
BY this time the master of ceremon-
les was sqrrirming about uneasily, and
the class of girls in the front row Of
seats looked anything but pleased.
How long the speaker might have con-
tinued without provoking a breach of
the peace is hard to conjecture, for just
at this juncture delegtion waited upon
from a certain training school in town
where class of nurses were being
graduated A speaker had been en-
gagged, Lawyer Blank by name. He
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-03-31
RAILWAyTIME CARR

Arrivals and departures of trains on anA
after January 9th. 1901 Explanation OF
reference Marks: sDaily; fSunday ex-
eepteG; MONDAY excepted: Saturday ex-
Sspted. tsunday only. Eastern standard
Line. which is. one hour earlier than
Dziennik Chicagoski. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1890-1971, 1901-03-20
SmierG starego strazaka.

W swojem mieszkaniu pm. 2S07
Fifth ave., umarf wczoraj rano we
wieku 58 lat po diugiej chorobie
pensyonowany cd 1 Lipca 1893
szef batalionu stray pozarnej Mi
kolaj. Byf on przez lat % czfon-
klein miejskiej stray ogniowej i
odznaczaf sic zawsze wielkiem po'
czuciem obowiazku. Pozostawia
wdowe, try c6rki czterech synow,
z kt6rych kazdy jest W miejskiej
sfuzbie.
Dziennik Chicagoski. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1890-1971, 1901-03-20
Wnioski do ustaw.

Komitet rady powiatowej, zfozo-
ny komisarzy Walker, Beer i
Organ, wyjechaf wczoraj do Spring.
feldu, azeby przedfozyc legislatu-
re wnioski do r6znych ustaw ko-
rzystnych dla obywateli pfacacych
podatki. Wnioski to tycza sic
miedzy innemi poprawienia usta-
wy podatkowej spadkowej, azeby
so procent tego podatku powiat
m6gt obracac ma cele dobroczyn.
ne; konsolidacyi komisyi wybor-
czej 2 komisya jury; poprawki u
stawy o regestracyi, poprawek do
ustaw sadach przysiegfych; po-
prawek do blu budzetowego, po-
prawek do ustaw wyborczych i t. p.
Tenze komitet ma wystqpic pre-
civ zamierzonemu podwyzszeniu
pensyj sedzi6w stanowych z $1,000
ma $4,000 roczpie powiekszeniu
kollegium sedziowskiego trzech
sedzi6w obwodowych trzech So
dzi6w wyzszego sadu.
Dziennik Chicagoski. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1890-1971, 1901-03-20
Przebrana dziewczyna.

Ma dworcu berlinskim W Ham.
burgu aresztowano chfopaka, ktory
podr6znym ofarowai swe usiugi do
niesienia kuferka. Ma policyi podaf
ohiopak, re sig nazywa Karol Lurak.
poniewaz jednak ME miai papierow
legitymacyjnych, kazal mu sic wa.
chmistrz rozebrac, ably zrewidowac
ubranie. Gdy chtopak sic wahaf,
rozerwaf mu wachmistrz JACKIE, ale
chiopak poczai teraz piaka6i j prosic;
MECH mnie pan ME rewiduje, bo ia
jestem dziewczyna. Do protokuiu
podaia dziewczyna CO nastepujei 20
smierci wuja swego, u ktorego W
Kr6lewcu mieszkaia, by}a zmusIona
sama ma siebie pracowa6 jako siero-
ia. Ma ogfoszenie pewnego kupca
przyjechala do Berlina, ably objad
mleJsce. Ponlewaz kuplec P1acif
jej tylko l5 marek miesiecznie,. q
Berlin drogi, ME mogia wyzy6. WI.
dzac ma dworcu tragarzy, ktorzy
dziennie 4-5 mix. zarabiali, diugo
sic ME namysla}a, ale przyjaci6ice
kazala sobie obcia6 w}osy, sprawiia
ubior mezki wyiechaia do Ham
burga jako tragarz szukad zarobku.
Ia pierwsza swa prace zarobiia so
fen., ale juz przy drugiej ja pochwy-
como. Po atwierdzeniu prawdy pu.
szczono przedsiebiorcza dziewczyne
ma wolnos6.
Dziennik Chicagoski. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1890-1971, 1901-03-20
Rome wiadonoscl
teIegraficZne.

- Pafac kanclerza niemieckie-
go W Berlinie zostanie odrestauro.
wany kosztem 100000 marek.
= W r6znych miejscach W Eu-
ropie padaf ,,krwawy" deszcz. Wo-
da by}a zabarwiona czerwonym py.
lem, naniesionym przez wiatry z
pustyni Sahary.
- Pod Dortmund spowodowaf
jakis ,,szpieg" wybuch dynamitu.
: Prezesem i wiceprezesem sej-
mu Sachsen.Koburg wybrano 80
cyalistow.
= Policya W Berlinie ME pre-
szkadzafa W tym roku odwiedzat
grob6w polegfycb W r. lS48.
= Ma nowym okrecie wojennym
angielskim ,,Bulwark" pekf pod
czas jazdy pr6bnej kocioi.
- Carowa wdowa rosyjska Ma
ria Teodorewna przybyfa do Ko-
penhagi, ma urodziny ojca, kr6la
dunskiego.
= MAJ kr6lowej Wilhelminyzo-
stanie jutro wprowadzony jake
czfonek rady panstwa. Kr6lowa
bedzie prezydowaia ma posiedze-
niu.
We wfoszech 8 urzednik6w
celnych zostaio zasypanych przez
spadajaca z g6r lawine sniezua.
w Secunderabad, W Indyach
eksplodowa3 granat. z kanonier6w
postradslo 1ycie