davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The age-herald., 1901-09-26
Mlstook His Head for a Stump.

There is Jefferson County farmer, a friend of mine, who this summer had a watermelon patch in which grew the fin- est melons ever brought to the Birming- ham market" said John Perry
 "The melons were seemingly an irresis- table temptation to the negroes of the neighborhood-the negro can never entire ly resist dem watermilyuns-and so my friend determined to sit guard over his own patch
 "Arming himself with a Winchester rife the first night after reaching his va lorous determination, he proceeded to his patch. Walking around for an hour and he would sit down and take it easy. He placed his rifle across his lap and waited events. Being unaccustomed to sitting up after o'clock he became drowsy and was soon fast asleep. He was snoring away peacefully when five ne- groes entered the patch close to where he was sleeping and began turning over melons and humping them to find out if they were ripe.
 Finally one of the negroes found an immense big melon that sounded thor oughly ripe. and he called to the others to come on. Lifting the melon he turned to a stump close by and brought it down with a crash, breaking 1t open and show ing the rich and juicy red so dear to the darkey's palate.
 'The stump moved suddenly and then gave forth a prolonged howl. The negro had mistaken the head of my sleeping friend the farmer for the top of a stump
The age-herald., 1901-09-26
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR
From the New York Press.

From the NeW YOrk Press.
 A merry life means a sorry death. Ministers marry people and lawyers un- marry them.
 The really clever man never takes 1t for granted that all other people are fools. What age is to wine youth is to women. The trump card of matrimony is a gen.
 tie tongue.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26
MIR. THoMMAsoN's TROUBLES.

From the Indianapolis Sun.
 When I came home yesterday the maid met me at the door.
 MT. Thommason," she said, "some one with a bill was here yesterday"
 I glanced in the parlor and saw that the room was full of neighbors.
 Some one with a bill?" queried; was 1t the lawyer?"
 No" answered Marie, with smile, it was the stork."
 I have since heard that some people say that the dialogue between the maidser- want and myself was arranged before hand, so as to give out the impression in the neighborhood that I was wit, but that's a lie.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26
Richard F. Johnston to Speak.

Richard F. Johnston has been chosen by the Birmingham Elks to speak in their behalf in the memorial services in honor of the late Rev. Dr. Owen P. Fitzsim- ons in the church of St. Mary y's-on-the- Highlands next Sunday forenoon. This would seem to be especially fitting. In his boyhood, Dr. Fitzsmons was a pupil of MT. Johnstons father, the late Col. Rich ard Malcolm Johnston, in Colonel John ston's school at Sparta, Ga. MT. Johnston is eminently capable of eloquent eulogy.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26
ROOSEVELT A FREE MAN.

From the Cincinnati Enquirer.
 He was elected jointly with William Mckinley, with the perfect understand ing that he might easily be the legitimate Presidential legatee. He Is President, with full rights as such, and he Is not bound or warped by any party history, real or imaginary. He has free and full power. He Is not behoden to MT. Hanna. Nor yet Is he beholden to MT. Platt. He may easily say: "A plague O both your houses"
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

said the mans honor was wounded and he wanted satisfaction. I did not care about going out under the oaks if I could get out of it honorably. The happy and correct solution of the thing struck me in a minute. Where money is in volved,' I said to the second. 1t must be paid and full settlement must be made before a challenge can be enter tained according to the code The sec ond knew the point was well taken and he advised his principal to pay the bill so the arrangement for the fight could proceed. The money was paid on the same day and I gave the second re- ceipt for it. And now he said, we will take up the matter we were discuss ing this morning. and there was grim sort of smile on his face when he said 1t. I will give the gentleman complete satisfaction I said, and since the bill has been paid and Is now out of the way l will authorize you to present my apol- ogy to the gentleman The second did not expect this sudden turn of things, shook my hand and left the office ap- parently well satisfied that he had pro- tected the honor of his principal
The age-herald., 1901-09-26
UPTON PARTY HAS $22,ooo BET

N. Y. Letter in Pittsburg Dispatch.
 Those on board the Erin and Sham rock are very confident that the latter will win and have backed up their faith to the amount of $22,oOO in bets. Guests of Sir Thomas are proving their loyalty by laying wagers on their hosts boat but he himself, so far as known, has made no bets.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26
LITTLE BATEEsE.

By William Henry Drummond You bad leetle boy, not moche you care How busy you're kipin' your poor gram pere,
 Tryin to stop you ev'ry day Chasin' de hen aroun' de hay Wy don't you geev' dem a chance to lay?
 Leetle Bateesei off on de fiel you foller de plough, Den wen you re tire you scare de COW, Sickin de dog till dey jomp de wall, So de milk ain't good for noting at all- An you Ire only five an half dis fall,
 Leetle Bateesel Too sleepy for sayin' de prayer tonightf Never min: s'pose it II be all right Say dem tomorrow-ah! dere he go! Fas' asleep in a minute or so- An he'll stay lak dat till de rooster crow,
 Leetle Bateesei Den wake us up right away toute suite Lookin' for somet'ing more to eat, Maxim me t'ink of dem long leg crane, Soon as dey swaller, dey start again, l wonder your stomach don't get no gain.
 Leetle Bateesel But see heem now lyin' dere in bed, Look at de arm onderneat' hees head; If he grow lak dat till he's twenty year l bet he'll be stronger dan Louis Cyr And beat all de voyageurs leevin here,
 Leetle Bateesei Jus feel de muscle along hees back, Won't geev' heem moche bodder for car ry pack On de long portage any size canoe. Dere's not many ting dat boy won't do, For he's got double-joint on hees body. too,
 Leetle Bateesel But, Leetle Bateesel please don't forget We rader you're stayin' de small boy yet. So chase de chicken an mak' dem scare, An do W at you lak wit your ole gran pere,
 For wen you're beeg feller he won't be dere-
 Leetie Bateessl
The age-herald., 1901-09-26
The state,s ereat coIIeae.

The present attendance of students at the Alabama Polytechnic Institute, or as it is popularly called Auburn humber ing $40 for the first week-is believed to be the largest in the history of Alabama colleges. There are 130 new students, and this number Is certain to be increased. Jefferson County. with 40. has but four less than the combined attendance from Montgomery, Mobile and Dallas. "Au- burn is admittedly one of the very best of all southern colleges, and it deserves its great success.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

Porto Rico the sailmakers spent three or four hours overhauling one of them. This is especially noticeable because the American sails, even those of Constitu- tion, have received less attention during the whole season than Ratsey has given to Shamrock in one week
 The deck compass was overhauled un- der the eye of Navigator Hamilton, and as soon as the yacht reaches the Horse shoe it will be adjusted by Negus.
 Down at the Morse Iron works Fifty sixth street, the workmen were giving a final rub to the under body of Colum- bia, using an oil polish instead of the molstened powder applied to Shamrock It was intended to lower her into the water during the afternoon. But on learning that Shamrock would be kept in the railway until noon tomorrow it was decided to keep the polishers at work on Columbia until 10 or Il o'clock tomorrow morning. She will then be set af1oat and lowed to the Erie basin, where she is due to arrive at 9 D. m. There she will be fioated into the dock beside the Shamrock, after which the 
 put his tapeline over both of them, and all the old barnicles will have such an opportunity for comparisons as comes at best but once in each international contest.
 For the first time since his painful acci- dent Sir Thomas Lipton was able to visit | the dock yesterday. He was limping little, but looked better in spite of the pain he suffered, than when he was laid up. It is likely that the confinement to his room served to rest him a bit
 Meantime Dr. Reid Mackay was carry ing about a photograph of the latest Shamrock mascot. It appears that when with party of friends. among whom was a married couple having an attractive baby in arms Sir Thomas took the lit- tie one and fondled it as gracefully as if he were not confirmed bachelor. Then came the Hon. Charles Russell with snap camera, and, unknown to Sir Thom- as, took accurate aim and captured the group.
 The photograph has the babe in the cen ter, and a very attractive mascot the | youngster is. Some of the Shamrock's s. crew think Dr. Mackay should have been a preacher instead of a physician. He has served them as chaplain since he arrived in port, and on Sunday delivered a dis course to them, taking as his text the i twenty third verse of the thirty-third chapter of Isaih, which says:
 Loose hang their tacklings they can- not well uphold strongly their mast; they cannot spread their sail. Then are di- vided booty and spoil in abundance"
 Every time the Shamrock sailors saw Sir Thomas limp yesterday they broad eped their smile. If any patriot has money to bet on Columbia he can find takers at the Erie basin. .
 A prominent member of the Larchmont Yacht Club has bet 5000 to $500 that Shamrock wins at least one race.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

Governor Odell has already declined a Presidential nomination in 1904, and the late MT. Hanna's ghost may as we'll do likewise.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

continued. Tt was very damaging, in- deed"
 "But don't you believe that crops in Alabama this year are as rule good7" was asked.
 'Yes: crops are very good" Mir. Weiss said. 'As a matter of course the June drouth did great deal of damage, but subsequent favorable weather largely made up for the dry weather backset, and there are good average yields throughout the State. The point sought to make was that most people in the cities seem to be unaware that the two bad days in the early part of last week cost the farmers of the State a great deal of money in the way of damaging cotton in the fields.'
The age-herald., 1901-09-26
Two Bad Days Caused Heavy Loss.

"The two days of heavy rain and high wind last week did a great deal of dam age to the cotton crop in central and southern Alabama" said Jake w. Weiss of Mobile at the Morris last night And seeing that MT. Weiss travels all over Alabama and knows more people than any other one man in the State, his views are of more than ordinary interest.
 That short but very bad spell of weather did much more damage to cotton in the fields than most men interested in cotton seem to be aware off, Mr Weiss
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

Senator Allison says any new anti anarchist laws must not infringe on proper freedom of speech. Overt acts are more to the point.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

President Roosevelt is trying to in- duce his administration to call in the detectives and body guards that now surround him.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

Shows are expensive in New York, where their removal costs 49 cents a cubic yard. But who can measure slush?
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

Roosevelt street and Roosevelt ferry and ex-alderman of the Roosevelt fam fly render the family name very fa- miliar in New York city.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

The packing of the personal belong. ings of Mrs. Mckinley at the White house is the last act of sad and sud den tragedy.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

M. Santos-Dumont should try some thing easier than dirigible balloon. It is wilder than a tiger cat.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

The assassin's trial Is to be ended today America is coming to her senses in this respect.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

Gus Addicks informs helpless little Delaware that he will vex her as a Senatorial candidate as long as he lives.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

Joseph Jefferson's twenty-years maps are giving him long life and much con tentment and prosperity.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

Seth will think his family name fits him when the returns come in.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

The terms of some of the Cabinet are not riveted beyond rupture.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26
THE onls DAILY NEWSPAPER IN ALABAMA

Go to, they are not men O their words; they told me was everything; 'tIs a lIe--I am not asue-proof.
 king Lear.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

Today the yachts will need all the wind, and their respective champions will rest their mouths.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

The naval coterie is trying to estab- fish it's preconceived judgment.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

Every war puts at least one hero in the White House.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

The anarchists are persistent, while the cranks are spasmodic, and both need watching.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

Sir Thomas Lipton's parked shins will not prevent his attendance at the race today.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

Thomas Platt and Mark Hanna are beginning to exploit themselves again in interviews.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

The veneer of civilization is very thin, almost transparent, where lynch ings occur.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26
IN HOTEL LOBBIES
 AND ELSEWHERE
Judae WIIson and the Capital.

''The startlingly sudden death of Judge Jeremiah M. Wilson of Washington chief counsel for Admiral schley has about 1t the clements of tragedy upon the stage of the nation" former Washington cor respondent said last night.
 "on Monday he conducted the case for Admiral SchIey before the court of in quiry and appeared In great good spirits and vigor, notwithstanding his advanced age. As the court was being called to or der the next morning the great lawyer was appearing before the Supreme Court of All.
 Judge Wilson's death removes from the National Capital it's greatest lawyer and one of it's most picturesduely distin- guished figures. His hair and snort cropped beard were as white as snow, his face was as ruddy as schoolboy' s, his step was springy. even jaunty, al- though he was well past seventy, and he bore himself with great dignity and charm of manner. Upon his white, head he wore the glossest of black silk hats and his black clothes were ever scrupu- lousy tidy. Seeing him in the street the stranger would invariably look at Judge Wilson a second time.
 '"The great lawyer had been judge and Congressman of distinction Like many other former Congressman have done Judge Wilson settled down in Washington and engaged in law prac- tice. He attained a degree of success scarcely equalled by any other one of his class, and as a lawyer became known throughout the country. He was man whom good men delighted to honor living and whom they mourn dead.
 What an extraordinary fascination Washingto on has for men who have tasted the sweets of political power there! Cabi- net ministers, Senators, Congressmen- few of these ever willingly quit the Ma tions Capital. There must be scores and scores of them retired who are still liv- inv wit hin the shadow of the Capitol s mighty dome. Some of them, men of wealth, stay there for pleasure, but most of them are engaged in law prac- tice.
 And what is true of these men of high CT rank is likewise true of nearly all men who have held any public office in Wash irgton. Very few ever go away from the capital if they can possibly earn living there.
 "The fascination of Washington has de- stroyed many a brilliant career-has done more in that direction perhaps than has any one of the commoner vices of so- ciety. A young man in some distant coun- try town, with every prospect of use full and honored career before him, catches the Washington fever, his Con . gressmar gets him an appointment, and then It's farewell to all ambition, all de- sire to rise in the worldn'
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

Czolgosz is getting his rights. and full justice will soon be meted to him.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

President Roosevelt has yet to show where he Is at.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26
About Persons.

Probate Judge A. P. Longshore of Shell by County was in Birmingham yesterday. Judge Longshore has grown stouter and somewhat more sedate than when in oth- CT days he was conspicuous member of the Legislature.
The age-herald., 1901-09-26

ohu OA-oAuOi h1eNA Ol lhC AecOSS'Oas AoAAA fly render the family name very ia. miliar in New York city.  Governor Odell has already declined a Presidential nomination in 1904, and the late MT. Hanna's ghost may as well do likewise.
 
 President Roosevelt Is trying to in. duce his administration to call in the detectives and body guards that now surround him.
 The packing of the personal belong. ings of Mrs. Mckinley at the White house is the last act of a sad and sud. den tragedy.
 Shows are expensive in New York where their removal costs 49 cents a cubic yard. But who can measure slush?
 Gus Addicks informs helpless little Delaware that he will vex her as a Senatorial candidate as long as he lives.
 M. Santos-Dumont should try some thing easier than a dirigible balloon It is wilder than tiger cat. 1ndnnh Inffnrcnn'c @xuAnfU-unoro nj are giving him long life and much con tentment and prosperity.  The assassin's trial Is to be ended today. America is coming to heI senses in this respect.
 Today the yachts will need all the wind, and their respective champions will rest their mouths.
 
 The anarchists are persistent, while the cranks are spasmodic, and botf need watching.
 Thomas Platt and Mark Hanna are beginning to exploit themselves agair in interviews.
 The veneer of civilization is very thin, almost transparent, where lynch ings occur.
 Sir Thomas Lipton's parked shins will not prevent his attendance at the race today.
 Czolgosz Is getting his rights, and full justice will soon be meted to him  The naval coterie is trying to estab fish it's preconceived judgment.
 
 The terms of some of the Cabinet are not riveted beyond rupture. Seth will think his family name fits him when the returns come in. Every war puts at least one hero 1T the White House.
 - -- procidapt RoOsevo1t hps vet t0 show
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1901-04-03
I'll Z PRESBYTERIANs :.

The committee of the Tween tieth
Century Fund in the Synod Of Virginia
composed OF the Rev. II. A. White, Of
Lexington; Rev. F. j. Brooke, of Alex.
andria, and Rev. F. T. McFaden, OF
Lynchburg, held a meeting in L. neh-
burg Thursday. They were in consul
tation with committees from the Diff
ferent pfesbyteries to devise scheme
for raising $332,000 10 carry forward
educational work in the State. OF this
100000 is for Onion Theological
Summary, 100000 for collegiate in
stitutions, $4,000 for Stonswall Jack.
son Institute, $4,000 for Lewisburg
Female Institute. $4,000 for Hoge
Academy, aud $4,000 for Presbyter-
ian academies. The $4,000 thus ap-
pointed for Presbyterian academies
shall be distributed among the nine
additional presbyteries in proportion
to the number OF church members The
report further recommended that each
presbytery raise fund to be invested
or it's own use. This fund Is not to
bs used for academies. The sums APP
portionsd for the prcsbyteries to raise
as their contributions to the general
fund are as follows: Abingdon, $751;
$50; Chesapeake. $12.500; East Han :
over, $31.25); dreenbrisr, $l9,750;
Kanswha, $12,5o0; Lexington, &c.,
600; MaryIan'1, $12, 500; Montgomery,
$31 500; Norfolk, $1S.750; Roanoke,
$1S.75O; West Hanover, SO, 500; Win
chss >er, $25. 900; total, $3.50
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1901-04-03
LOCAL BREVITIES.

Mr.. Edward II ook has been elected
delegate to represent the Lexington
Odd Fellows at he meeting of their
grand lodge in Roanoke il Ma.
The Washington and Lee Alumni
Ast eciation of New Orleans has mott
fed Acting President Tucker that it
will contribute $1,000 to the Wilson
memorial fund.
The third biennial convention Of Mu
Phi Lamda fraternity will be held in
the fraternity hall in Lexington on
April 5th and 9th. This fraternity was
founded at Washington and Lee Uni
vsrsity in 1895.
The Daughters Of the King Of Grace
Memorial Church will have their an
nual Easter egg hunt OF Mr.. VIM. A..
Anderson's on Easter Monday, April
9Th, 4 p. m. Admission &c. Refresh
ments extra.
Nellie May Geidel. aged eight years.
died at Waynesboro, Pa, March %
1901, after brief illness. She was a
daughter of Mr.. and Mrs. John Gsidel
and granddaughter of MIR. W. V. Will
kerson Of this place.
Mr.. J. E. Irvine, OF the firm of Ir-
vine & Stevens, clothiers, OF Char.
lottssville, Va, was tired in the police
court yesterday for doing business
without license, AMI was fined S25
by Acting Mayor Penick. An appeal
was taken.
A numerously signed petition from
the voters of Goshen, bJth Democrats
and Republican. was presented to Hon.
II. st. g. Tucker and Hon. W, A. An
derson, urging them to announce them
selves ~ candidates for tho constitu-
tional convention, and plsdging thses
gentlemen their united support.
Mr.. and Mrs. James W. Lapsey, Of
Anniston, Ala, have issued cards an
nouucing the approaching marriage of
their daughter, Miss Catharine Ruth
erford Lapslsy, to William White
Sproul, a prominent Augusta county
maa. The ceremony will be an cat
home" wedding Wednesday afternoon,
April 10th, at 5 o'clock.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1901-04-03
IN THE COUNTY COURT.

The Apr. term Of the Rockbridge
County Court convened Monday, with
Judge W. P. Houston presiding. 1t
was q regular grand jury term. That
body was composed as follows +. A.
OFT, foreman; W. N, Bell, j. Henry
Parsons, J. W. Hall, John W. Saville.
NJ. P. Dunlap, q. E, Lockridge, Charles
L. McClung, W. P. Saudridge, John A.
Champ.
After due investigation the follow
ing true bills were returned:
Stonewall Sect, for seduction.
Ed Rhodes. for selling liquor in local
option district a indictments.)
James Brown, for selling liquor in
local option district.
Milt. Pettigew (colored), for selling
LIQUOR in local option district.
j. A. Menefee, for larceny.
The follcvi proceedings were hal
in court DIP 10 Tuesday afternooD, when
recess was taken until Thursday
morning:
John H. Mccormick qualified as ad-
ministrator of J. r. Mccormick, de-
ceased.
G. X. Jordan qualified as lminis.
traitor of J. P. Russell, deceased.
TIE will Of Mrs. s. A. Mohler was
fully proven, and W. R. Humphris
qualified as administrator, C. t. a.
Agnes Jane Agnor qualified as the
guardian OF her three children, Blaine
IT,. u ,mer Reid and James III. Agnor.
r 5. Fulw,lsr qualified a. admins
RAZOR Of W. F. Morris, deceased.
An authenticated copy Of the will Of
George A. Fellows, Rem sselaer county,
New Yerk, was presented and admitted
to proba as viii Of personal property
in tlis stat William Gordon Fellows
was appointed and qualified as adj
e.. t. a, d b. p.
4 venire 1aci vGs issued fora jrry,
retmn2ble tor Tlarsda", 10 Try mis-.
dem eanor cases, and same for Mon Day
tc Try the fe ony cases.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1901-04-03
RAPAINE.

Mr.. D. E. East, the enterprising
stock dealer, last week shipped car
load OF $50 hogs from this depot
Mr.. J. r, Crist has sold bis farm in
this vicinity to G. E. Wade and has
bought upon Kerr's Crock, where he
moved this week, Mr. Wade taking
possession OF The place here.
A series Of revival meetings is In
progress, conducted by Rev. A. II.
Hamilton, and considerable interest is
manifested.
Mr.. Fornas Cbittum is slowly re-
covering from severe attack OF pneu-
monia.
The young people Of Middlsbrook
were in Midway with their entertain
ment, which was largely attended and
highly enjoyed. II.