The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1901-11-07
ROMANCE AND REALITY.
Surprising Experience of n Humor-
list Who Believed in His
own Jokes

was IdhlnS MS HTSl call upon young
lady whom he had met at a social gath
ering. Mr.. Farfech was high,up in his
profession, but his duties were so
arduous that he had no time for the
social amenities of life, and this was
his first experience in that line, says
the Chicago Tribune.
The girl happened to be looking out
of the window as the visitor reached
the gate, and she observed his move
ments with considerable curiosity.
He opened the gate carefully, paused
and then whistled softly. Then he
came up the path slowly, looking to
the right and left over his shoulder al
short intervals, and when he reached
the porch and laid his hand on the
doorbell he heaved a great sigh of re-
lief.
You are i'll, Mr.. Farfech?" said she,
apprehensively, as she took his hat and
coat.
MO-" he replied, promptly, "but
1 confess l was a little afraid of the
dog"
The dog?" She looked surprised.
"Why, we have no dog"
mo dog!" he repeated, blankly.
"Why, l thought-that is All, yes
to be sure
Hardly had he seated himself when
voice from a distance called Nary"
He gave little jump, and then
smiled.
"Your mother. presume" said he.
"She is coming in to-er-make few
remarks
MA? o, not at all. Why should
she?"
She went out of the room, and dur
ing her absence a bright boy of about
II made his appearance in the hall.
"Ah," said the visitor, you are
Miss Delivers brother"
Eyes, SIR" said the boy, politely.
81 am Mr.. Farfech. 1 suppose you
have heard your sister speak of me.
Come, now, my little man."
81 do not remember hearing her
mention your name" replied the boy,
as he passed on, leaving Mr.. Farfech
staring in a puzzled way.
Presently the young lady returned
and Mr.. Farlech was surprised to no.
tice that she did not turn down the
gas, and when, after some conversa-
ton, he asked her to sing for him, she
did so without any excuse or COM
planning of sore throat.
After an hour of singing and con-
versation an idea suddenly dawned
upon him, and he began to paw under
the sofa.
what is the matter?" asked the
young Lady, in apparent astonish-
ment.
Hush! not world" said he, with
chuckle. I'll snake him out in
minute
SNAKE him out? Really, Mr.. Far
fech-"
That's all right. I'm on to these
tricks. Your young brother is under
the sofa, and is going to jump out pres
emily and say something rude. They
always do"
"Mr. Farfech," said the young lady.
with dignity, 81 have only one broth
er, and he has gone to a meeting of the
Philomathean society. As for hid
ing under a sofa, 1 never heard of such
a thing"
Mr.. Farfech passed his hand over
his brow and murmured: Il do not
understand this at all"
Another half an hour passed. The
young lady's mother did not come in,
and he felt as one in a trance. Then
he frightened up as he heard a gruff
voice in a back room.
"Your father?" he asked, inquirfng-
ly. Putting on his heavy boots,
SUPPOSE"
"Why should he put on his boots
at this time of night? ?" asked Miss Dol
liver, wonderingly.
"Or, perhaps" he suggested, che is
getting down his shotgun?"
Shotgun? 1 never knew pa had
gun. Really, Mr., Farfech, you have
the most extraordinary ideas"
Pardon me-" he muttered, "but all
this is so strange-so different from
what I. VIII you sing again?"
She did her besti to entertain him,
but it was plainly to be seen that he
was i'll at ease. He talked almost at
random, and she wondered where was
that brilliancy which she had so much
admired in his writings. Finally, il
drew on to II o'clock, and, as his eve
caught the timepiece, he frightened up
for the last time.
"Well, Miss Doll;ver," he said, as he
arose, 81 suppose here is where you
sing Five O'Clock in the Morning or
There Are Moments When We Wish to
Be Alone"
81 am not acquainted with either of
those songs, Mr. Farfech," she replied,
calmly. "Are you really going? Why,
it is not late. o, well; if you must.
hope you will call again soon"
As he passed down the walk, he
said, feverishly: "No gun-no kick
no bad brother-no meddlesome moth
er-gas up high-no hints to travel.
This is-this must be dream"