davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
How They Do In China.

In China liquids are sold by weight
and grain by measure. John buys
soup by the pound and cloth by the
foot. A Chinaman never puts his name
outside Of his shop, but paints instead
a motto or list Of his goods on his
vertical signboard. Some reassuring
remark is frequently added, such as
"'One word hail." "a child two feet
high would not be cheated" Every
single article has to be. bargained for,
and it is usual for the customer to
take his own measure and scales with
him.
When you engage servant or make
a bargain, It is not considered binding
until 1.-The fastening penny" has been
paid. Although his bad faith Is notori-
GUS in some matters, vet, to do him
justice. when once this coin has been
paid by, you he Chinaman, cody or
shopman will generally stick to his
bargain even If the result to him be
loss. ag Ea ~ q
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
The Lemon.

The lemon contains various acids,
citric acid among them. with citrate Of
potash, and these acids oxidize in. the
blood iato carbonates Of potash and
carbonic acid. AS scurvy is believed to
be due to lack Of potash salts in the
blood. we see how substances like lem
ons, potatoes and fresh vegetables gen
orally act as preventives Of the all
ment. Also in rheumatism, in which
It is desirable to maintain the alkaline
character of the blood, lemons arc of
service. Beyond this / do not think
anybody can vaunt the properties of
the fruit. A healthy person has no
more need Of lemons than Of, say, tea.
for his ordinary food will supply him
with all that is necessary for the
maintenance Of sound body. People
who talk about lemons. AS good for the
liver" and so forth. found their belief
rather on faith than on knowledge
London Chronicle.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
A Curious Trap.

A curious labyrinth in which ele-
plants are captured alive is to be seen
near Ayuthia, formerly the capital of
Siam. The labyrinth is formed Of a
double row of immense tree trunks set
firmly in the ground, the space between
them gradually narrowing. --.
Where it begins, at the edge of the
forest, the opening Of the labyrinth is
more than mile wide, but as it ap-
proaches Ayuthia it becomes so mar
row that the elephants cannot turn
around.
Suspecting no danger the wild ele-
plant enters the broad opening at the
forest end, lured on by tame elephant.
The gradual narrowing of the bound
aries is not observed until the ele-
plant finds himself in close quarters.
Having reached the end Of the laby-
rinth, the tame elephant is allowed to
pass through gate, while men lying
in wait slip shackles over the feet Of
the captiyes. The sport is a dangerous
one, for the enraged elephants some
times crush. the hunters under their
feet. 81 s.t - s-as
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
Alphabetical Abuse.

The prosecuting attorney in q law
suit had waxed especially indignant at
the defendant. whom he characterized
as an abandoned, baneful. cynical.
diabolic, execrable, felonious, greedy,
hateful, irresponsible. jaundiced. knav-
ish, lazy, neddlesome, noxious, outra-
geous and profligate rowdy."
"The learned, counsel on the other
SIDE" said the attorney for the defend
ant when he rose to reply. should
have put his adjectives in q hat and
shaken them up little before using.
You must have noticed, gentlemen OF
the jury, that they were in regular al
phabetical order. This shows that he
selected them from a dictionary. be-
ginning with "a He stopped at p
but in his manner of reproducing them
he has given US the cue as to how he
got them" - rs $50. III
This turned the laugh against the
other lawyer. and he lost the case.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
: - 49, ---4t --. H-a 80 -
4 DiacOYerer.

Bobby burst into the house in state
Of high excitement His hands. and
clothing were smeared with liberal
amount of some sticky substance, and
his face wore a glow Of triumphant
satisfaction. y. ~ ~
II say, mamma, those new people
across the way don't know much" be
exclaimed. They've got sign on
their front door that says WET
Paintr" ..s..,
"And you are covered with it! You
ought to be ashamed OF yourselfr' said
his mother severely. "That sign was
put up to warn people to keep away
from 1t.
Eyes, mamma" persisted Bobby,
with the enthusiasm Of richly re-
warded scientific investigator. "but it
wasn't paint, and knew It. It was
varnishv'-London King. -
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
aGrowins Down..

Everybody has noticed that in ex-
treme old age people grow rapidly
shorter, SO that person formerly Of
average height "grows down" into
quite diminutive man or woman. A
German contemporary points out that
this decrease of.height begins as early
as the age Of 35 years. At 80, we are
told, the human body has reached its
full height, which Is retained for few
years. after which the growing down"
process begins. At first and for many
years the process is so slow as to be
almost imperceptiDie. but at the age Of
about 60 1t begins to be noticeable, and
after 20. even though veteran does
not stoop at all. the fact that he is
growing down" becomes apparent to
one and all.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
a Reluctant Cand1dat~.

Reluctant Candidate.
During q local election in a German
town only one man appeared at the
nomination desk.
Whom do you nominateY' inquired
the official.
"Myselfv' was the answer.
DO you accept the nomination.
.'Wsll. no."
The officer laughed and said:
'IThen we must try again. Whom do
you nominate?"
"Myselfr'
"You accept the noninationY
mo"
"A subdued ''donnerwetterv' escaped
the lips Of the perplexed> Official but he
went on:
"For the third time-whom do you
neminateY'
"Myselfv same the invariable reply.
do you accept, the nomination."
The man rose up, and smile of
satisfaction spread over his face as he
answered proudly:
Having been three times solicited
by my fellow citizens to accept the
nomination. | can no longer decline to
..ccede to their wishes" He then re-
tired.-Tit-B Bits.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26

yes" said young Mr.. Bashful to his
best girl. the stock market has been
through considerable excitement of
late"
"Oh. yes" the girl responded, eager to
take part in conversation on q topic
which interested her Adoiphus. 81
have read a lot about 1t in the paper
all about those dreadful bulls and
bears and things"
"Yes," Adolphus went on; ''they got
the shorts in a corner and effectually
squeezed them"
did theyY &
"Yes." &c.,. -z..ass
II think" the demnre maid added,
after few minutes, meditation, that
IL ever become a Spectator shall be
q short" So.
A few minutes later she found it was
not necessary to speculate In stock In
order, TO be. treated as q '.short." Pitts
burg Commercial Gazette.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
A Bright Jury.

In larceny case in Maine it was
agreed to 60 on with only II men on
the jury. The trial lasted several
hours, and then the Jury retired to
deliberate upon the evidence and find
a verdict. After being out four hours
the jury reported that it could not
agree, and accordingly it was dis
charged from further duty in the case.
and the prisoner was remanded to the
Jail. A little later the attorneys for the
respondent "got at" one of the jury
men and asked him how the vote stood
in the jury room. #
"Well," said he, 1--WE balloted about
20 times, and each time there were II
votes for conviction. but at no time
could we get IL votes for conviction, so
we had to report a disagreement"
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
The Fishing otter.

The otter used by. Scottish poachers
Is one of the most deadly fishing instru-
ments known. In some waters Is Is far
more effective than a net. 1t may be
described as water kite. which serves
to take out over the water q line bear
ing so or more flies. The otter itself Is
a floating piece Of board loaded along
one edge to keep it upright. The poach-
er walks along the side Of Loeb or river,
letting ont the fly decorated line as he
goes, the otter board gradually working
out toward the center. An enormous
area Of water Is fisbed at one time and
numbers of fish are killed.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
raleigh. F.vorite ripple.


Sir Walter Raleigh seems to have had
pretty taste in stimulants. to Judge
by his cordial water" the recipe for
which is copied from cookbook near
~ 800 years old. This is how Sir Wal
ter concocted his faNorite drink:
take gallon of strawberries and
put them into pint Of aqua vitae
.(brandy). Let them stand SO four or
five days. Strain them gently out and
sweeten the water as you please with
fine sugar or else with perfume"
Queen Elizabeth was exceedingly
fond Of perfumes, and. according to
this old book, her favorite scent was
made in this manner: "Take eight
speonfnls of compound water. the
weight Of twopence in fine powdered
sugar and boil it on hot embers or Goals
softly. Add half an ounce of sweet
marjoram. dry it in the sun. the weight
of twopence of powdered benjamin
(benzoin?). This perfume is very good
and sweet for the time"
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
Cigar. Are Rights and Lefts.

1T is not always because a cigar is
badly made that the wrapper curls up
and works off," said a tobacco dealer.
ut Is often because right handed
man is smoking left handed cigar.
Sounds strange, hey? Well. a left
handed cigar is one rolled by the max
er's left hand, for all cigar makers
must be ambidexterous. A piece of
tobacco for wrapper Is cut on the
bias and is rolled from left to right on
the filler. The other piece, for reasons
Of economy, is then used and must be
rolled the opposite way by the opera
tors other hand. Hence smoker who
holds his cigar in his right hand some
times in twisting 1t about rubs the
wrapper the wrong way and unloosens
t"-Philadelphia Times.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
Unavoidable.

I '''Why do you wander aimlessly from
place to placer inquired the philan-
,thropist.. a3
well" answered Wandering Mike.
t"eight hours sleep day is enough for
anybody. And we's gotter do something
wit de other 16 hours, amt weY'-
Washington Star.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
Arundel Castle.

The most singlar circumstance shout
Arundel castle is that Its owner, by
mere right Of ownership, is Earl Of
Arundel In the peerage Of England. It
Is believed that there is no similar ex-
ample of peerage held on such condi-
tons. Apparently there would be no
legal obstacle, were the house of How
ard to fall upon evil days and the cas-
tie be sold to some millionaire. to pre-
vent the millionaire taking, his seat in
the house Of lords as Earl Of Arundel.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
A Bit of Bowery Dialogue.

!; A Bit OF bOwery Dialogue.
v This gem of metropolitan English Is
vouched for by the New York CORE
spondent Of the Pittsburg Commercial
Gazette: v...
! l heard this bit of dialogue between
two Bowery hoodlums the other day:
Said one as he pointed to his shiny
black trousers: "Oh, CHIMNEY, howcher
like me blacks?'
"All right" was the response, "but
dey amt ez good ez yer hghtest."
"G'wan. yer guy; git wise. Desc is
dose, only had 'em dyed"
And then they got aboard car.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
Industrious Locusts.

He was an old sailor and full of
yarns about the good old times OF sail
ing ships. 81 remember once" he
said, while we were cruising round
the Pacific we We're surrounded by q
swarm Of locusts, which ate every
inch Of our sails. When we got into
the next port. I'm blowed If we didn't
see the same locusts and every one
with pair Of canvas trousers"
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
Death Hulch.

fH !
A ravine in the northeast corner OF
Yellowstone National park, in Wyc-
ming, is known by those living near by
rs Death gulch. Grewsome as Is the
name, 1t is exceedingly appropriate. 1t
Is a v shaped trench cut in the noun
tainside and begins about 250 feet
above Cache creek. Apparently II
forms a natural shelter for the beasts
of the forest, as food. water and shelter
are there, but entrance to the gulch
means death to any animal, for the
poisonous vapors that rise out Of the
ravine are more deadly than the bullets
Of the huntsmen.
For ages this death trap in the Rocky
mountains has probably been Turing the
Inhabitants Of the forest to their doom.
With the rains OF spring the bones Of
the dead Of the preceding year are car
ried down to the creek and the gulch
cleared for the death harvest of the
summer and winter. II
The biologists say that the lavas
which fill the ancient basin Of the park
at this place rest upon the TANKS of
mountains formed Of fragmentary vol
anic elects. Gaseous emanations are
given out in great volume. These come.
the scientists say. from deposits of al
tered and crystalline travertine mixed
with pools in the creek. Above these
deposits the creek cuts into a bank Of
sulphur. In the bottom Of the gully is
a small stream sour with sulphuric
acid. r<
Ne wonder the poor animals seeking
shelter in the gulch meet death there.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
How to Quit Chewing Tobacco,

The substitute cure" is worthy of
the attention of sufferers. We have a
citizen Of Mobile who has tried it. He
was an inveterate chewer Of tobacco.
He stopped chewing and took to chew
ing pine stick. He always has this
bit of wood between his teeth, in wax
ing hours at least. He has not tasted
tobacco in many years.-Mobile Reg
lister.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
An Awakener.

A preacher, raising his eyes from his
desk in the midst Of his sermon, was
paralyzed with amazement to see his
rude son in the gallery pelting the
hearers in the pews below with horse
ichestnuts. But while the good man
was preparing frown of reproof the
young hopeful cried out:
"You tend to your preaching, daddy.
I'LL keep 'em awake" re
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
A Moody Retort.

A religious enthusiast, whose hobby
was anti-Catholicism. went to the great
evangelist one day and put the direct
question: "Mr. Moody. do you ever in
tend to do any preaching against the
CatholicsY'
yes, may some time"
'When will that beY
"After the Protestants are con-
verted."
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
one way Of Telling.

Curley-You see that fellow loafing
over there? He used to go to the same
college that / did. wonder II he re-
members me?
Burleigh-Ask him for the loan Of So.
Chrley-What for?
Burleigh-If be remembers you, you
won't get it-Judge.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
Dt1ereut From theSRest.

Dfnerent From thesRest.
They are talking about how they
happened to marry.
Il married my wife. !" said one after
the others had all had their say, "be-
cause she was so different from any
woman had ever met"
"How was that?" chorused the
others. z3
"She was the only woman ever
met who would have me-"
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
A Light Repast.

Hungry Horace Kind lady, can't We
gimme somepin ter eat? amt ate
nothin sence day before yesterday. s
Kind Lady-And what did you eat
then?
/ Hungry Horace-N othin but de mar
ket report in an old PAPER. Baltimore
American.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26

The Candid suburbanite.
II suppose people around here raise
their own vegetablesY
"Some do; others merely plant them"
Puck.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26

It may be that you haven't more
trouble than others. but that you have
more time to think about II. --Atchison
Globe.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
A Hard Character.

Hell went to the palmist's last week
to have my character read.
She Yes2s What did he say7
He-He didn't say anything. he
locked at my hand. coughed = BIT and
then gave me my money back. New
York Times. NJ IS NJ
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26

Mind IL that which preceives, feels.
remembers, acts and is conscious Of
continued existence.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26

P0liteness Is like an air cushion
there may be nothing in It, but It eases
many hard jolt. Chicago News.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1901-09-26
Bxplained.

Customer-Waiter it Isl nearly half
an hour since ordered that turtle
soup.
Waiter-soi y. SIR. but you know how
low turtles re. sir.
Rosebud County news. [volume] (Forsyth, Mont.) 1901-1906, 1901-05-09
British Shipping Threatened.

The danger threatened to British
shipping by foreign competition is
the subject of investigation on the part
of the British Chamber of Shipping. At
recent meeting resolution was
passed urging British ship owners to
induce every firm to take at least two
boys as apprentices in each vessel, to
provide suitable accommodation for
them apart from the crew and to give
as much care as possible to their train
ing. At present there are not enough
British seamen to man the ships, and
unless England adopts the training
methods of other nations the compe-
tition bids fair to rapidly become
more strenuous.
Rosebud County news. [volume] (Forsyth, Mont.) 1901-1906, 1901-05-09
A Curious Trade.

The custom abroad of placing femi-
nine boots and shoes outside the bed
room for the porter's tender ministra
ton, so severely criticised by Ameri-
cans, who are accustomed to seeing
much smaller sizes on their women
folks, has led to curious trade in
Paris, by which woman's vanity is
quantity illustrated. 1t appears that
ladies with large feet, when staying
at hotels nowadays, carry with them a
couple of pairs of tiny shoes, which,
instead of the ones they wear. they
place outside their doors for the SER
wants to take away and clean. All the
big boot and shoe shops in Paris now
make a speciality of these tiny foot
wear.
Rosebud County news. [volume] (Forsyth, Mont.) 1901-1906, 1901-05-09
THE TRUTH IS FUNNY.
Marx Twain Says Most People WIN Laugh
1t the Plaln Truth.

Marx Twain Says Most People WIN Laugh
1t the Plain Truth.
Mark Twain said sadly not long ago:
THE funniest thing in the world is
the truth. Tell the plain truth and
the people will always laugh at it. II
l get up dinner and refer to a man
as an insincere galoot-I mean q man
who is present at the dinner-he as
well as every one else will laugh"
When Mark Twain returned to New
York last fall after his long stay
abroad it was particularly appropriate
that his first formal welcome home
should come, as 1t did, from the Lotus
club, and on that occasion Joy was
unconfined. Mr.. Clemens told some
truths that evening which proved the
correctness of his theory. In fact,
most Of the humor of the after-dinner
speeches which he has made this past
winter has been in his presentation of
truth. Mr.. Clemens speaks with a
slow, playful drawl, and occasionally
his eyes almost close. When laughter
interrupts him he opens his eyes, mods
UAu AOOhAA6 dlOA6 Luc l1uc VI AdCco
opposite him, he sometimes smiles in
enjoyment of the joke with them. Mr..
Clemens, in speaking at his first din
ner of the things that had happened
since he had been away, said, reflect
lively: "The Daughters of the Royal
Crown-there is an American ideal
for you! God knows what specialized
form of insanity it represents. 1t isn't
softening of the brain; you can't soft
en- thing that does not exist. There
are no eligibles but the American de-
scendants of Charles the Second. How
the fancy product of that old harem
holds up! AS he concluded this ref
erence his manner was almost savage.
Mr.. Clemens is a prudent man, though
he says he knows nothing of business.
and he does not sQuander much of his
high grade marketable humor on his
after-dinner speeches. He very evil
IDENTIFY makes no preparation for them,
and he talks about whatever the oc-
casion may uggest.-Ainslee's Maya.
zine.
Rosebud County news. [volume] (Forsyth, Mont.) 1901-1906, 1901-05-09
The Tenth Girl,
BY CASTOR HARVEY

BY CASTOR HARVEY.
Copyright, 1901, by Daily Story Pub Coz
They sat before the CRATE, while the
wind howled and ragged around the cor
ners of the house. The ruddy glow of
the fire threw the two figures out in
bold relief, he, manly, tall, and with
a strong, earnest face, she delightfully."-
feminine, with a mass of hayward
curls that were always escaping from
their combining pins and falling about
the deep blue eyes.
NO." he said, II do not think that
in woman there is such thing as
affection apart from Interior motives;
| will except, Of course, the love of
a mother But you take the average
woman, and she is guided almost en-
hrely by worldly motives"
don't see why you say that,
Lloyd" remarked the girl, with hurt
look. Il am sure that it is not SO,
that you are mistaken. Now take me
Tor instance-what motive could I have
had In promising to marry you, ex-
cept that | loved you?"
nat is very uellCate alluSlOn 10
~ poverty" he said and laughed,
"3It now, honestly, didn't you say to
yourself, Well, Lloyd has little Or
nothing just now, but he has health,
strength, ambition and a determina-
ton to succeed. He will succeed, and
IL is better to take him with those
prospects than to wait in the hope of
getting something better'-come now,
didn't you think of a few of those
'hings?"
You know l did not, and l think
1t is mean of you to say So" remarked
Edith severely.
Well, maybe not, but you are a
shining exception to the general rule
OF young women. Every man who is
accepted by the average woman is &C
cepted with reservation that he will
do. if nothing better turns up"
Lloyd. l never thought you could
Rosebud County news. [volume] (Forsyth, Mont.) 1901-1906, 1901-05-09
IN SELF POSSESSION
There II, Says Walter Damrosch, an Im-
portant Quality.

portant Quality.
The man who makes public appear
ances must have self-possession, says
Walter Damrosch. I have learned by
great experience that this quality is
all-important. There have been times
when the slightest perturbation on
my part would have made my orches-
ira play out of tune. The musicians in
an orchestra place just as much faith
in their conductor as do soldiers in
their general. The best example of
this quality l ever witnessed was
aboard an Atlantic liner. The second
day out we ran into violent weather.
The propeller shaft broke, and we
were drifting helplessiy. The waves
ran high and general scare ensued.
Hysterical women ran hither and
thither and the men were pale and
nervous. The officers, not knowing
what had happesed, at first, were OBJ
viously frightened. A pandemonium
seemed imminent In the midst of it
all young man whom l remember by
the name of Stone, who was making
his first voyage, came out of his state
room in an immaculate yachting suit;
he was cool and collected A man who
had been racing up and down, clad
in one of two scanty garments, seized
him by the shoulders, damned him
against the rail, and frantically said:
For Heavens sake what is the mat
ter? What is the matter?' go and
ask the captain, please" replied Stone.
Have you any idea Of what is going
one?" Stone pulled out his watch, looked
at it and said, as he puffed his cigar:
Il suppose it is something that hap
pens every Tuesday morning. This is
my first trip over, and I'm not running
the ship this time" In five minutes
order was restored, because other ex-
cited passengers became calm at the
self-possession of the young man.
Success.