Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-05-12
DER GERMAN COBBLER.
The Little Tailor Puts Him Tn to
Another Good Thing.

/ NN&gy iSiit, iStis ny u. IL Lewis
One eafnings dot little tailor comes
in my shop nit his cigar un,l good
clothes und big watch chain und says:
Hans. MAYBE you better go back to
der old country und pound sand?"
Why shall pound some sand?' /
says.
because you vhas no peesness man.
Py golly. but like to be in your place
once. 1t vhas sooch a golden oppor-
tunity dot it makes my hair stand oep.
Yes. sir. you vhas a reeeh man If you
only hat some brains in your head
"Vhell. tell ne about her You vhas
smart man, und | shall do ash you
say"
Yes. Of course, l vhas a smart MANS
he says, ash, he vhalks around NIT his
hands in his pockets. "a VERY smart
man. | pegin my tailor peesness nit
two patches und one spool of thread,
und where vhas | now? 1t vhas all in
having some brains, Hans. If your
head vhas empty, it yhas no use Can t
| you see how it vhas dot you don't rush
| peesness?"
1T vhas because peoples don't come
to my shop" says.
.'IJnd Why don't people come to your
| shop? ! can tell you. 1t vhas because
| a dago cobbler vhas one plock pelow
| und dago cobbler one block above,
| und dey work cheaper ash you do. No
| pody Will pay you feefteen cent for a
cement patch When dago Will put
I him on for ten"
! But it has no profit at ten.
CT course not, but dose dagoes make
profit in putting on half soles und
heel lifts If you get a man for ce-
merit patch, you also get him for half
soles. Don't you see? Dot cement
| patch vhas der draw. She vhas a
| thing of beauty und Joy forever.
Don't you see dot if druggist offers
you some hair oil for fife cents you
shall copy his store und pay 80 cents
worth Of earbolc acid?'
Maybe | see, but what shall l do?"
"You shall do like dis: Dose dagoes
must go. You vhss trust 70 freeze
'em out. You shall put on cement
patches for fife cents apiece. In two
weeks dey vhas out of peesness, und
der price shall come oop again to feet
teen
Well. dot looks all right to me und
my wife, und next morning put big
sign in my wondcw to say: Cement
Patches Fife Cents Apiece. Come In
Und Be Cemented." In ten minutes
one of dose dagoes comes in nit his
hair on end und yells out:
''Vhata dat sign mean. eh?''
ut vhas fife cents apiece" I says.
But you maka no money. You
knocha out de profits
dot vhas all X. o. Cement vhas
down TO feefty cents barrel, und
gif der pooblics de benefit OF der
drop.
Dot mans he shumyp oop und down
und pulls his hair und goes AWAY, und
pooty soon der odder dago comes in.
He vhas awful mad. He shumps all
around und cries oudt dot peesness
vhas ruined. und he makes SO much
fuss dot crowd come around. Dot
leetle tailor comes along und pats me
on der back und says haf some brains,
und in two hours more ash ten peoples
comes in after cement patches. 1t
makes me feel good but I don't make
any money, you see Der leather, ce-
ment und my time yhas 10 cents und
nopody WANTS lift on his heels or
some half soies. On der second day
one OF dose dagoes comes back. He
vhas no longer mad He yhas smiling
all oafer ash he says:
Hans like some pateha for fife
eenta
Ind what you pellet dot feiIer does?
He pours out two dozen old shoes from
bag. ind on each shoe ne WANTS q
cement patch. | like to go back on
him. but If my sign says fife cents how
can / get out OF her? | work awful
hard all day long und lost 30 cents.
ind yhen dot les.le tailor comes around
at night | speak to him about it
1t Vhas all right. my poy," he says
ash he hits me on der back In one
week der dagoes yhas frze osdt. ind
sou hat all der peesness for yourself
II you lose some money at first dot
vhas nottings. Keep right on und saw
some wood Z
Der next morning dot oadex doga
comes IA NIT bi9 hag n1Ig1.
don pull IT. - = 1huz
sde shust smiles - su y
szys: