The Grit-advocate., 1901-12-06
RIDICULOUS ESCAPADES OF SOME
REJECTED YOUNG MEN.
Foolish FrcakS of Youths in Old Eng
land-One Disappointed Suitor Went
to the Expense of .'Kurying' His Ex-
-Hnancecs Enections.

that it really does not matter how
much more foolish he shows himself to
be, it is impossible to say; but the
IacI remains that when he attempts
Ito get his own back" to use vulgar
phrase, he generally descends to
degree of Righteousness difficult to eX-
'ceed Some of his foolish freaks are
recounted by Tit-Bits. One salad
youth recently startled and annoyed
his erstwhile sweetheart and got him
self into trouble with the law by
chartering a small. but murderously-
inclined brass band to play the Dead
March in Saul under the lady's
window. This individual is not alone
in the glory of his ridiculousness; in
deed he was only modestly following
in the footsteps of another young
man who had been similarly rejected.
The latter young man took revenge
upon his reiecter by giving her con
stancy'' stately funeral, very much to
the amusement of the good folks re-
siding in his town. He caused death
notice to be inserted in the proper col
nouncing that the love and constancy
of the young lady had succumbed to
an attack of another young man on q
certain date Then he actually went
to the expense of "buryiIg' his eX-
fiancees affections. At noon one day
band of some eight or ten instru-
ments drew up in front of the young
ladys house, and was promptly follow
ed by a closed hearse and single
coach. Alighting quickly from the
coach the young man of misapplied or
,iginality ran quickly up the steps OF
the lady's house. and Immediately re-
turned, pretending to bear some heavy
object reverentially on the palms of
his hands. This imaginary something
was run into the hearse and the funer-
al cortege started to wend its way
slowly through the streets towards the
cemetery, led by the band playing the
Dead March," and with the addle-
headed young man as sole mourner.
Needless to say, the procession caused
a good deal of sensation in the town,
and by the time it had walked round
the boundary wall of the cemetery it
was the chief topic of local chatter.
and everyone knew what was the
meaning of it. A few days later there
was very nearly a genuine funeral, for
the young lady's new lover met the
old lover in the street. with a decided
advantage in favor Of the former A
black eye and badly swollen mouth
to say nothing of large bump on the
back of his head, caused by contact
with the curb must have impressed
the young man that he had gone to the
expense of funeral for nothing.
A provincial tradesman may be said
to owe the flourishing condition of his
business to have been Tilted by his
hearts choice, and taking revenge in
a manner which made him the talk of
his town. not large one, by the way.
After an engagement lasting the better
part of two years the young woman
Tilted her lover for a handsomer and
more prosperous tradesman from q
words of rejection cold on her lips
than he set to the work of taking sat
isfacton for the affront He shut UP
his shop and announced his death as
having taken place on account of Miss
--'s heartless conduct to him. He
had cards printed repeating the sad
announcement, aud these he sent
round to all the young womans
friends and his customers, and he ad-
Yertised in the local paper that his