The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1901-04-10
A Doctors Clever Device.

4 w
mans College, tells a droll story
about one Of her nncles: who is now
q prosperous physician with an extern
sivc practice in North east Baltimore.
Of course, the physician himself never
"oull have told the story, and it is
presented here with profuse apolo
gies.
The story was told by the lady be-
cause she was responsible for the
clever ruse that raised her uncle from
an unknown NJ. d. with a patientless
ofice TO prosperous doctor with
more patients than he he could possibly
attend.
DR.. Blank has just received his Ger
si6cate from the State board and be-
sides being minus experience and
practice he was alarmiugly short of
money. When his office was rented
and furnished be had very little left
and, naturally, he was anxious to do
something. But no one seemed to be
willing to give him start as prac-
titioner. Plenty Of people were ILL,
but all called other doctors. Months
went by and the situation remained
unchanged. Finally, in desperation,
he went to his neice, the author of this
story, in whom be was accustomed to
confide serious things, and told her
that it was his candid belief that he
was not meant to be doctor and that
he could never make living by medi-
eide. The niece, who was then un-
married. and full of pranks, half Sc
riously and half jestingly formulated a
plan which, she assured him, if car
ried out to letter, would make him
we'll. to do in short while.
She told him to go home and that
very day begin her instructions.
Whether the niece patterned her plan
after the one resortcd to by the doctor
in Dickcns's "Pickwick" is not known,
but it was certainly just and success
full. Her uncle was to get a horse
and carriage and keep them in front
of the Office. He was to have tcle-
phone. A! intervals during the day
he was to rush hurriedly from the
office, get into his carriage and drive
away in gallop, returning some
three hours later, also in hurry, the
performance to be repeated as often
as was compatible with the health Of
the horse and his own nerves. Also,
ne was to do the same thing once or
twice every night. For this exercise
he was to receive practice that would
increase and wax great.
The young physician went home
feeling as if he had read tale from
the Arabian nights. He counted his
money and studied long as to whether
he should invest in the scheme. He
spent sleepless night and worried
all next day, but he finally decided
to get the horse and carriage and try.
Two days afterward when hand
some rig stopped in front of tho doc
tor s Office several ladies on the op-
posite side of the street came to the
window and the DOCTOR from behind
the curtains of his Office window,
could see that considerable specula-
tion was going on. The neighborhood
children on their way to school stop
ped and made remarks. The doctor,
his heart beating away up in his
throat, waited until about 8 o'clock,
and then, according to instructions,
rushed out, jumped into the carriage
and drove off like mad. He repeated
the strategy twice that day and once
that night. He made two hurried
trips the next morning and that after
noon he got real call. A man down
the street was taken suddenly ill and
DR.. Blank was wanted there at once.
He attended his patient and was so
nervous that he spilled his powders.
That night he made wild drive, for
q sham, and about midnight was call
cd cut of bed to see woman with
infiammatory rheumatism.
He continued his sham practice for
exactly two weeks, his real practice
increasing daily, and then he stopped
because he didn't have timo for any
thing but bona-fide calls. During his
last sham drive two sick calls came in,
aud one of the cases went to another
physician.
DR.. Blank lorg ago moved to & more
fashionable locality; his telephone lis
ringing constanel, and handsome
carriage conveys him on his round of
calls. He and his niece often have a
quiet half hour together and talk il
over.-Bolfimore SIN