Daily Kennebec journal., 1901-03-06
The COnfidante.

speculating about thing which you
entirely understand, it is very difficult
not at least to put them on the right
path
In the nursery the education of
worthy confidante cannot be too early
begun: it must be that there is Il germ
inat beginning to this strange lack OF
comprehension of what it means to be
told a thing in confidence. very
early in life there must have occurred
repeated instances in which stories OF
what playmate, or brother. or sister
had told privately in trustfui conii-
dencc. had been listened to without re-
bukc. This would infer that the
mother thought it was : no harm 10
repeat such revelations. Not unusual
! is il for maternal anxiety, eager really
to know what lies underneath the sur
face life of the children, to find TINS
means of discovery too helpful to be
set aside To use it is to duh the hnest
perceptions of honor in child
nature. and to belittle for ever the I'M
portancc of keeping sacred a Ncrpai
trust.
There is also a humorous side to this
important phase of our intercourse
with friends and ncighbors. Frequent
Iy il occurs that the recipient OF 4 con-
fidence sits in Judgment upon the value
of the matter confidcd. This certainly.
when we analyze the situation. is de
lichtfully funny. Many times has
some thoughtleSs yet wholly good
natured person said to the writer: Il
was asked by So and SO not to speak
of this but it is ridiculous to make a
mystery of such tritle l can see
the least reason for not telling you.
To make up ones mind what friend
should or should not give out for pub
lie discussion. regardless of the man $
own wishes and use his confidence for
a topic of conversation under Your per-
sonaI conclusion as to it's Importance
is certainly a droll way Of arriving al
an end.
4 very remarkable EovernCSS made
stipulation with her employer that she
must not be expected to report what
was told her by her pupils. You vii
have to trust my own observations and
what | can urge them to tell YOU them
selves. but | must be free never to
break a promise Of secrecy, or expose
thing confded to me. They must
trust me implicitly
Family life. however outwardly open
and harmonious. is seldom one of real
confidence regarding the hidden
things of the heart" If our mutual
trust had never received Il shock. If in
ferenceS drawn from hearing the chat
enriched with what this or that one
had gathered from the days inter
course with friends had not reused q
feeling of apprehension. it seems Ger
tain that son to mother, and sister to
sister and even wife to husband ana
husband to Wife would oftcncr open
the treasure vaults within. Let these
be filled with hope or drained to low
ebb by stress Of misfortune, il is good,
indeed for man or woman to be abb,
TO say, Come see what my life means
and share both its gain and loss" And
this high and helpful privilege is de
barred to those who have no one to
turn to who will keep their confidence
inviolable.
1t is the rarest blessing which friend
ship affords us. this companion who
can strictly keep our counsel. If you
had committed a crime, is there any
one you know to whom you could
safely tell it," asked a cynical man
who had been listening to an ardent
defence If the ;ijist"orthincss of
friends. The test seemed necdlessly
severe. yet the greater is included in
the lesser: he or she who could not re
frain from limiting that you had been
worstcd in a bargain could not be
trusted not to look your way when
murder was talked of.
What is done in malice or ill-will we
can generally guard ourselves against.
. but from the easy going cant do any
harm disclosures of really affcctionate
friends it is almost impossible to de-
fend our lives. The too popular doc
trine that the only way to keep your
4 secrets is to trust no one, hardenS the
heart and puts an impenetrable veil
I between those who love each other
most fondly.
4 How many happy wives q" we know
! who can proudly feel that they have
( knowledge of their husbands hearts
to the core who hear the great bust
ness ventures and the daily vexations
and disappointmcntS told with equal
frankness? How many mothers can
whisper to themselves. My sons heart
I is like an open book to me-" Alas,
how brief the catalogue.
The loss of this great honor. the de-
privation of this tender Solace. is due
to the uncertainty of our power to be
7 true to a trust, and the history Of daily
4 life iustifies the uncertainty.-The New
York Evening Post