davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
What He Might Do.

The custom Of preserving the busi-
ness name of firm years after the
founders have passed away or disap-
peared finds its reproof in story re-
lated by the New York Evening Post.
A young man who was sent out to
canvass leading lawyers in certain
interest entered the Office of firm of
great prominence and said:
81 should like to see Mr.. M."-men-
tioning the first name of the firm.
every sorry, sir, but Mr.. NJ. has been
dead three years." was the answer.
"Well, in that case, should like to
see Mr.. N."-the second name of the
firm.
"AIr. N. retired from the firm over a
year ago." said the clerk. with smile.
Indeed; then may see Mr.. O."-the
last name of the three.
"Mr. o." replied the clerk, SAILED last
week for Europe, and won't be back
for a month yet; is there anything |
can do for your
There is," answered the canvasser,
with the utmost suayity; "some day,
when you have time, you might bring
the firm name up to date"
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18

The click Of steel at the same time
warned the intruder that the sentry's
eyes were upon him-at least, that his
quick hearing had detected the stealthy
steps on the wet sod. Then came out In
a half mufiied voice: "Who goes there"
This was the moment the officer of
the guard had fixed in his mind for
a test of the cadets soldierly quail
ties. The answer came quickly to the
sentry's challenge: Nobody"
To the amazement Of the officer, this
cadet came to fright shoulder shift" 7"
as it was called in those days, paced by
him and said: "AH right, my orders
are to let nobody pass, major"
The cadet has recognized the officer.
His answer, even IL not regular In a
military sense, was correct, but it was
a tough one on the major. The story
was so good it could not keep, and it
went to Washington.
ITO make long story short" said
the West Pointer, 'that answer, un-
der the circumstances, won influence
enough for that cadet not to leave
the academy as deficient but mere
ly to be put back for another years
chance. Result? He graduated with
high honors in the following June and
was my commander in the Philippines
six months ago" New York Journal.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
PASSING.

Low in the West the daylight dips,
While by the pool the Summer stands
With stain of purple on her lips
And scarlet flowers in her hands.
Within the watery mirror there,
Narcissus-like she sees her face,
So pale, so sweet, so mortal fair,
And fingers spellbound by its grace.
The morning red is vanished now,
The splendor of the noon is gone,
And, like a veil on cheek and brow,
The wreathed mist is clinging wan.
A breath from meadows shorn exhales,
A sigh goes down the forest ways,
The dryads Of the woody wales
Are mourning for the passing days.
And Summer hears the warning note,
As by the reedy pools she stands,
Her fading tresses all afloat
And scarlet flowers in her hands.
st. Louis Mirror.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
SAVED BY HIS WIT.

How One West Point Cadet Avoided
Being Deficient"
There was an officer in the regular
army who is stationed not a hundred
miles away from Governors Island,
this very day." said West Pointer yes
terday, "who would never have gradu-
ated at the academy hid it not been for
his cool nerve plus his quick wit on a
trying occasion" And the West Point
er went on to tell Of the cause and effect
of that nerve and quick wit.
Twenty odd years ago, when he was
at West Point, there was a cadet there
who "funked" in his final examina-
ton in his fourth year. He was pop
ular fellow and his classmates felt sor-
ry for him. They were all to doff the
gray for the blue in few days and the
poor fellow-it had leaked out despite
regulatfons-would be declared on grad
uation day deficient only one out
of class of more than 60.
1t SO happened that a night or two
before graduation day Mr.. X.-let him
be called that-was obliged to be on
sentry duty. The officer of the guard
that night got sudden idea into his
head; the cadet might be so disheart-
ened that he would be neglectful of his
duty. He would test him-see If he had
soldier stuff" in him, even though the
odds were against his future.
1t was dark, rainy night. The Of
ficer of the guard suddenly came across
tbe cadets post.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18

stable, when she suddenly swerved
from dark figure walking rapidly
in the shadow.
Esme. who had been sitting lightly
in the saddle, thinking over her after
moons work, was taken unawares and
flung to the ground
STOPPING over her, Jack-for it was
he who had unwittingly frightened the
cob-lifted her quickly In his arms. She
was dazed and stunned, and as her
head rested on his shoulder he stopped,
and pressing his lips to hers stole the
kiss that he had never dared to hope
would be his by right.
"Esme," he said, after a pause, in
which each read the others heart, 81
never dared to hope that you had given
me your love, and l have no right to
ask you to be my wife, for in few
weeks shall have no home. Briars-
mere is no longer mine. kissed you be.
cause l could not help it as you lay in
my arms, and l thought you had
tainted
"Briarsmere is mine," said Esme,
smiling, "and it is mean of you, Jack,
only to want to kiss me when l have
tainted. Chicago Tribune.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18

Thousands of voices, through many
years, have been raised in melodious ut
terance of the beautiful words of Lead,
Kindly Light" and Nearer, My God, to
Thee" but probably never before have
these hymns been sung with such depth
of feeling and such fullness Of meaning
as during the days following the death
of President Mckinley. Ever dear, the
fact that they were the fayorites Of the
martyred President around whose bier a
nation mourned has made them more than
ever precious. Bands of music played
the notes in solemn dirge and In the
churches of the land organs pealed forth
the touching strains and lips uttered the
words, while the mind dwelt upon the
scene where the spirit of William McKin-
ley went out in sublime submission to the
will Of the Master
How trustfully he yielded himself to
the guiding hand of the Universe! Into
the Great Beyond he passed, in the spirit
SO beautifully expressed by Cardinal
Newman's hymn:
Lead Kindly Light, amid the encrcling
Lead Thou me onl
The night Is dark, and am far from home
Lead Thou me on!
Keep Thou my feet; do not ask to see
The distant scene-one step enough for me.
was not ever thus, nor prayed that Thou
Shouldst lead me on.
loved to choose and see my path; but now
Lead Thou me on!
l loved the garish day, and, spite of fears,
Pride ruled my will; remember not past
years.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
PRESIDENT M'KINLEY's FAvoRITE HYMNS.

rooted in his affections than that other
song of praise and yearning, the words
Of which he murmured as life was leaving
the body
Nearer, my God, to Thee, Nearer to Thee;
E'en though 1t be Cross
That ralseth me;
Still all my song shall be,
Nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer to Theei
Though like the wanderer, the sun gone
Darkness be over me,
My rest a stone,
Yet in my dreams I'd be.
Nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer to Thee
There let the way appear
Steps unto heaven;
All that Thou sendest me
In mercy given;
Angels to beckon me
Nearer my God, to Thee,
Nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer to Thee!
Or, If on joyful wing,
Cleaving the sky,
Sun, moon and stars forgot,
Upward / fly
Still all my song snail be,
Nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer to Thee
The latter hymn was written by Mrs.
Sarah Adams and Lowell Mason arrang-
ed the music. 1t was in 1S41 that it was
produced, and was based on an old Eng
lish melody. The author was the wife of
Bridges Adams. an inventor and pamph-
leteer, who was born in Great Harlow,
England, and died in August, 1S4S.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
If In Doubt, Work IL out.

A Cambridge university professor,
who dreams in figures, has done the
following atrocity.
times plus 2 equals Il.
u times plus equals Ill.
123 times plus 4 equals iii.
1894 times 8 plus equals Hill.
12345 times 8 plus 6 equals Hill.
123456 times 8 plus equals HILL.
1234567 times 8 plus 8 equals 11111111.
-12345678 times plus 8 equals
111111111.
/ times 8 plus 1 equals 8.
IL times plus equals 90.
123 times 8 plus equals 987.
1884 times 8 plus 4 equals 9S76.
1886 times 8 plus equals 9S765.
1886 times 8 plus 6 equals 9S7654.
1234567 times 8 plus equals 9S7654S.
12345678 times 8 plus 8 equals
98765432.
12S4567s9 times s plus 8 equals
9S7654321,
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
Catching Tigers.

Capturing tigers by novel method
is now being adopted in Sumatra, and
is proving almost Invariably success
full. AS soon as a tigers lair has been
found, natives are employed to con-
struct wooden fence nine feet long
and four feet wide a short distance
away from it, and in this inclosure Is
then placed as bait dog, which is
tied to one of the fence posts. A mar
row entrance leads into the inclosure,
and there, deftly concealed under
earth, leaves and boughs of trees, is
placed a strong steel trap, which is so
designed that any animal that places
its foot on it is certain to be held cap
tive.
This trap is of recent invention, and
consists of strong steel plates and
equally strong springs. When it is set
the plates form a sort of platform, and
as soon as the tiger which has been
lured thither by the dog sets his foot
thereon the springs are released, and
the cruel steel grips the leg and holds
it fast.
Powerful as tiger is, he cannot free
himself from such bondage, and as
those who have set the trap are never
far away he is in short time either
killed or securely Gagged. At the same
time the dog is released, and, indeed,
he could not be removed from the in
closure as long as the trap was set,
since this instrument, strong as it is,
nevertheless is so delicate that the pres
sure even of a dogs foot would release
the springs and cause the animals leg
to be crushed in a twinkling.-London
Telegraph.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18

he was already on the road. 81 have
ordered back the pipes and stills.''
'The dickens you have" roared I'm
derwood, as he paced the miserable
room.
Aquarter of an hour later Esme was
in the cozy Office Of her friend and ad-
wiser, Mr.. Rance.
''It is large sum of money to invest
in landed property, Miss Esme."
81 know" said the girl, in her quick,
bright way, "but what does that mat
ter? l have ever so much more when
that Is spent. Besides happen to know
the mortgage will be foreclosed if this
money is not paid, and l have other
reasons as well"
Beauty trotting along in the twilight
was within a mile of her own warm
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
RPidPSmePe.

"A SME BARTON, as she rode along
Sc on her trusty little cob, paid no
~ heed to the weather, so absorbed
was she in her own thoughts.
Ralph Underwood was coming that
night to-ask her to be his wife, she felt
sure, for his manner at the Fletchers'
dance had been unmistakable.
What answer should she give him?
Could she ever love a man she did not
Altogether trust?
All, If only Jack could speak she
knew what answer she would give if
he ever asked the same question, bbut
Jack never would, now, though years
ago he had shown in hundred little
ways that he loved her.
But that was before his father died,
and Briarsmere was found to be mort
gagged and all the affairs terribly in
volved. So now Jack was poor man,
and had even undertaken work as I'm
derwood's agent to pay off the mort
gage, which Ralph held.
Esme was rich, and could do as she
liked with the fortune she had inher-
tied from her mother, but was power
less to help Jack because of that un-
written law that ga man is to WOO, a
woman to be wooed."
The rain poured down and at last
awoke Esme to sense of what was
going on around her.
The rain was coming down in tor
rents, and an ominous roll of thunder
in the distance made Beauty tremble.
1t was a lonely part of the road; only
little cabin, much out of repair, was
in sight. She hastened toward it, not
knowing if Mrs. O'Grady still occupied
the place, or whether she had already
gone to live with her sister in Kerry.
On trying to lift the latch, Esme
found it was locked, but discovered a
shelter in the peat shed at the back.
AS she stood there caressing her
horse to allay its fears, she was star.
tied to hear key fitted into the lock
of the door in front of the house. =.
The boards Of the mud-covered walls
were ill-ftted and rotten, and Esme
could distinctly hear two men talking
as they entered and shook the water
from their clothes.
"a good thing we are here so nea1
the place." said Underwood.
"Yes," answered a voice which made
Esme blush in the semi-darkness, s'it
is bad storm. but it will soon be over
1 am not sorry it has come now, as yor
will see that something must be don,
TO the place before another tenant oc
cupies it. 1t isn't fit for dog to live in.
81 shall do nothing; it's no use spend
ing money on property of this kind
These peasants are used to pigging it
Leave the place alone"
"That is, Of course, your affair, MI
Underwood" said Jack "In my posi-
ton as agent it was my duty to poin
out to you what was needed, but can
not make you do it. Only tell you al
man to man, that the neglect of you
tenants interests is a disgrace to tn,
neighborhood. l have worked as you
agent in order to work off the mortgag
which you hold on my property, but
suppose the foreclosure which yol
threaten must come, for / cannot worl
for you any longer and have not none,
to redeem the estate"
And, pray, why am I to lose you
valuable servicesY said Underwood.
.You know that during my manage
ment your profits have nearly doubled
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
Breezy.

Henry" said a young mother to the
old-bachelor lodger, what shall we
name the baby? Hubby and can't
agree. We want name that is appro-
pirate, and odd, and pretty, and that
hasn't a horrid nickname to it. Can't
you think of one?'
"Humph! l don't have to name ba-
bies. should think you would call that
kid Cyclone, though. It's appropriate,
at least"
"Why so?"
"The house has been full of squalls
ever since he came"
''Horrid!"
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
In the Harvest Field.

Frederic Mistral, the Provencal poet,
tells charming story of the first meet
ing of his father and mother. Like all
romances it has its like in a more an
cient legend, suggesting, even to the
scene, the ever-beautiful story of Ruth
and BOaZ. Mistral was born at Mail
lane, village at the foot of the Alps
contracted when his father was about
SO, marriage Of pure romance. This
was the meeting Of the middle-aged
man and the girl who became his wife.
One year, on st. Johns day, Maitre
Francois Mistral was in the midst of
his wheat, which a company of har-
vesters were reaping. A through of
young girls, cleaning, followed the
reapers, and raked up the ears that
fell. Maitre Francois, my father, no.
ticed beautiful girl who remained be-
hind, as If she were ashamed to CLEAN
like the others. He drew near, and said
to her, "My child, whose daughter are
you? What is your name?"
The young girl replied, 81 am the
daughter of Etienne Poulinet, Marie of
Maillane. My name is Delaide."
what! the daughter of the Marie Of
Maillane gleaning?"
"Maitre," she replied, "our family is
large, six girls and two boys, and al
though our father is pretty well-to-do,
as you know, when we ask him for
clothes he replies, Girls, if you want
finery, earn it And that is why came
to CLEAN"
Six months after this meeting, Maitre
Francois asked Maitre Poulinet for the
hand of Delaide, and of that marriage
I was born.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18

but when it comes to distilling liquors
in underground distilleries and expect
ing me to be party to the fraud, ]
draw the line"
How dare you speak like this to
me" said Underwood, choking with
rage. "You pauper, if 1 had not en-
ployed you, you would have starved"
'sYou are exaggerating my poverty"
said Jack, in a calm tone. st is true,
by honest work 1 hoped to regain my
property, but when you expect dishon-
est work, you have come to the wrong
man."
"By the way" continued Jack, and
Esme could hardly catch his words, for
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
Two Views.

Castleton Ito Dashaway)-What do
you think of it? Here's Clubberly, who
1 have always thought was friend of
mine, actually asking me to lend him
$25.
Clubberly Cater, to Dashaway)-What
do you think of it? Here's Castleton,
who l have always thought was a
friend of mine, actually refusing to
lend me S25.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
OUR BUDGET OF FUN.
HUMOROUS SAYINGS AND DO
iNGS HERE AND THERE
Jokes and Jokeiets that Are Supposed
to Have Been Recently Born-SayinEs
and Doings that Are Old, Curious and
LaughabI.-The Weeks Humor.

Time, 11:45 p. m.
A sound resembling distant peal of
thunder is heard directly overhead.
"What was that?" asked the young
man as he started up from the parlor
sofa in alarm.
"That?" echoed the fair pride of the
household. "Oh, that was only papa
dropping a hint"
And hastily gathering the hint unto
himself the young man carried it out
into the gloomy night.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
A Picnic Incident.

"Either that young fellow down there
with his girl is liar or I'm nothing" :"
remarked the adventurous caterpillar
as he proceeded to lower himself on his
silken thread.
"What do you meanY' inquired the
tree toad.
~ just heard him tell her that moth
ing, she might be sure, would ever
come between them. m."-Philadelphia
Press.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
CT rushing,

81 never was so humiliated in me
life as much as l was in New York;
exclaimed Meandering Mike.
"What happened2" inquired Ploddfng
Pete.
''De prosecutin' attorney accused me
O. bein' as unprincipled as de police
man dat arrested me."-Washingto
Star.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18

''The pen is mightier than the sword,'
quoted the man who clings to proverbs
My dear SIR" rejoined the modern
ist, sit is no longer a question of pens
and swords. The debate now is as to
whether the typesetting machine is
mightier than the Maxim gum"
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
Two View. of Niagara.

Overheard at Niagara Falls: at
seems pity to see all this water going
to waste" remarked the clerical-look-
ing man, with the white tie. what
good is it?" asked the man with the i'm
pressionist nose.--Philadelphia Record.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
A Scandal Spoi'ed.

Miss Sharpe-Mrs. Gay is always de-
lighted every time her husband goes
away on a business trip.
Miss Gaussip-Aha! Do you know l
thought there was something wrong
Miss Sharpe-Yes, you see, he always
takes her with him.-Philadelphi
Press.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
Two Girls.

'sIf ten men should ask you to marry
them, what would that be?"
what would it be?"
"A tender"
"And If one should ask you, what
would that be?"
81 don't know; what?"
"a wonder."-Life.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
Fishing Luck.

Little Willie-I bin fishin', NAV!
Mother-Nonsense!
Little Willie-'Deed hav', NAV! I
caught all our goldfish with a pinhook.
Ohio State Journal.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
Spoke from Experience,

Bob Smith and Mary Jones were Sc
cretly married ten months ago. Just
think of it! Married nearly year and
nobody the wiser!
Mr.. Enpeck-Oh, 1 don't know. I'll
bet Smith was a whole lot wiser be-
fore he had been married month.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
AdYica to Sch!ey.

Admiral Schley-Yes, sir; was at the
battle of Santiago and took an active
part in it.
The interviewer gracious, Ad-
miral, you'd better hustle home and
read the official naval history of your
country.-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
A Quiet Tip.

"Oh-er-pardon me, Miss Maudie,
but at what age do you think women
should marry? You know the papers
are discussing the question
AT about my age, think, Mr.. Tim
i'd" she replied, sweetly.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18

"Is. it true," asked the benevolent
lady, that you often have to go with
out a meal?'
st is, ma'am," replied Tattered
Thompson. "This breakfast you have
given me was due ON the morning of
May Z, 1SS9."-Leslie's Weekly.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18

So long Thy power hath blest me, sure it
still
Will lead me on
Ger moor and fen, o'er crag and torrent till
The night is gone;
And with the morn those angel faces smile
Which l have loved long since, and lost
awhile.
This hymn was one Of the fayorites of
the President, though perhaps less deeply
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
Circumstances Alter C,.es.

Mrs. Dorcas-What does your hus-
band do during the summer?
Mrs. Gayboy - That depends on
whether stay at home or go away
to the country.-Judge.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18

It is astonishing how ignorant rail-
way officials are when asked for the
details of an accident on their road.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18

Writing love letters requires great
mental effort" said Bunting.
''Ycs, sentimental" added Larkin.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18

She-Untrue to you, Arthur How
dare you. What proof have you?
He-You are again wearing that shirt
waist that Bobby Gillum admired so
much last week.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
A Male Owner.

Jake-Here's advertisement in tn
paper fer that dog you found. The
man wot owns him offers a reward.
Jim-How dye know it's a man?
Jake-Th' paper says mo questions
ked."-New York Weekly.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18

What we need in politics." said the
man of theories, sis candidate who is
not afraid to stand up for his party's
principles"
"Yes," replied the practical individ-
ual, "but the candidate who knows how
to lie for his party's interests seems to
hold the winning hand.'
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
Breezy Undertaking.

Blinks-I hear you are about to start
a new paper. What are you going to
call it?
Jinks-I had thought seriously of call
ing it the Bugle.
Blinks-Good! Just the thing If you
have fully made up your mind to blow
yourself.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
SHERLOCKHOLMES,J JR
CHICAGO PARODY ON DoYLE.s
WONDER DETECTIVE.

An Exam pie of His Marvellous Powers
of Deduction as They Strike the Mod
ern Newspaper writer-History of
an Exchanged Umbrella.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18

"What a great boon hairpins are to
women" observed Pennington.
"And to men," fastened Meekwood
"How sop
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18
Exacting.

First Summer Girl-Oh! broke OF
the engagement He was so unreason-
ahlai
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-18

why, when a woman fills her mouth
with hairpins a man has the chance to
get in few words"