The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1901-03-22
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him."-ChicagO Record.
A Dreadful State Of Affairs: He
Well. we can't believe more than half
we hear. She-Oh. worse than that;
can't believe more than half say
Life
rs the bos' IMP asked the stranger.
entering the drug store. NO" replied
the absent-minded clerk; "but we have
something Just as good."-Yonkers
Statesman.
Corrected--Lady Tourist doing the
Cathedral Of Scotland)-This is Gothic,
isn't it. Johng Juvenile vendor of
Guides" (severelyl-No, mem; this is
byterian.-Punch.
Cause and Effect.-..No wonder Gil
sey is good natured. Everything comes
his way" Perhaps everything comes
his way simply because he is good ma
tured. Boston Transcript.
Jester-There's one good thing about
an ice trust-it can't afford to shut up
shop like the mill trust for instance
Jenkins-Why can't il? Jester-Why, /
the iced melt.-Ohio State Journal
Did you ever hear anything against
his honestyE' NO, sub" answered Mr.. /
Erastus Pinkley But he eats chicken
mighty regular on Sunday an he's allus
got an umberell when it rains. Boston
Herald
Right in His Line.-"The first Ameri-
can to enter Pekin was a soldier-mu-
stefan who scaled the wall" ~Well,
say, musician ought to be an expert
on the scale. hadn't heT-Cleveland
Plain Dealer
He Gin his wrath)-When I married
you had no-idea what fool you were.
She Qn her equanimity)-Th fact that
| was willing to marry you should have
removed all doubts on that pOlnt.-Bos-
ton Transcript.
The Indignant Citizen. drag
my name into print in connection with
this absurd affair." cried the indignant
citizen; but If you do, be sure to spell
out my middle name in full."-Cleve-
land Plain Dealer.
A Rise in Life: Casey-Since the
Hoolihans got rich. l sh'pose they're
t'rowin ON all kinds av shtoile. Muir
phy-I sh'd say SOL They've changed
tn goats name to Nannette, b'gob!-
Baltimore American.
"Stimson is a mean man" why
SOP Hes got a way Of keeping his
: wife from going through his pockets
for loose change" "HOw's that?' HE
spends it all before he gets home
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Resting His Eyes.-Exchange Editor
! am sorry to say my eyes have gone
back on me- and l can't read any more.
D Can't you give me something else to
do? Managing Editor-You might do
: book reviews.-Exchange.
Very Aggravating: wife-Oh. doctorl
e will John pull through? Doctor-Can't
S say. ma'am. The crisis will not arrive
for at least a week. Wife-Oh, dear
+ And that bargain sale OF mourning
goods ends o-morrow.-Judge.
Miss Blink and l hadn't seen each
, other for nine years" The meeting
d must have been interesting" Yes
!. she reminded me that when | visited
+ her nine years ago l carried off bel
whisk-broom. Chicago Record.
% Clark wonder how man feels
when he finds himself hopelessly bank
rupt. Clerk-Say, didn't your wifi
ever insist upon having the dress
maker in to make her fall clothes RICH
after getting home from the seashOre
7 Life.
" Quickly d.-Friend-What wa
r. your graduation essay about? Mabel
- what the Astronomers Know Abou
" Mars" Dear mel Why did you choos
m that subject2" Because didn't hav
ID time to write much."-New Yor
IN Weekly.
r. The Cheerful Idiot; Il wonder" sal
It. the shoe-clerk boarder. why they ca
III it mistletoe?' 1T is so called becaus
Of the missu toe the mark every time sh
er sees a bit of it suspended it anywhere,
I'll said the Cheerful IdiOt.-Indianapoli
ID Press.
r. Tommy-Pa. what does disagree
OF mean? Pa--Well, when two peopl
'e- think alike they are said to agre'
al Now, you can guess what disagree
II means. Tommy-O, yes, that's whe
Mt only one people thinks ahke.-Philade
uu phia Press.
NJ Scandal: "She seems to me one Of II
a. most MISUNDERSTANDING yOun
gu women in Boston, They tell dreadfl
= stories about herr "IndeedT "Ye
He they say, for instance. that the lens'
of her spectacles are plain glass, wit
no magnifying power whatever" I'D
troit Journal
pc Ibid you ever get rellgionY ask'
,cf fI,a rovfx-oIiSt well. l should saw