The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1901-07-19
you think it would be forward in me to
let him know that I have now refused
all the offers l care to"'-Leslie's
Weekly.

you think it would be forward in me to |
let him know that l have now refused
all the offers I care to?'-Leslie's !
Weekly.
Mrs O'Hoolahan (across the dinner |
table)-"Yez look worrit, Patrick. Phat's |
the matter"' O'Hoolahan-"Will, since |
a bout the thirteen av us sittin' down at |
the table. Give little Moike his dinner !
off one av the washtubs. '-Brooklyn
Eagle.
why. where did you come from, Uncle |
Jasper" ! said to the old darkey who |
had sent the houseg:rl in to tell me that
he wanted to see me.
II come fun Decatur. Miss Alice" he |
said. Il got to Atlanta bout two hours |
ago, but l didn't low you was ready to |
see nobody
Did you come On the train?" asked |
NO ma am, dat didn't. l come in on |
&c rabbit"
"On what?'
"On de rabbit. You sholy. done heerd
er Dc new rabbit dey's GOT
'0h,'1 said, you mean the rapid tran
Sit"
.Yessum, de rabbit transhunt, OATS
rabbit "-bursting into langh-:.''but she
Leslie's Weekly. !
"Science has proven said the profess
sor Of astronomy. that there is no water
at all in the moon. Now. Mr.: Fresch
what do we deduce from that!'
THAT there is some excuse for its get
ting full so regularly replied Mr..
Fresch.-Philadelphi Press.
When l meet paragraph which be-
gins
1T is now necessary to retrace our
steps somewhat to explan'-or.
The crimson sun by TINS time neared
the horizon. Far over the hills stretched
vault Of heavy cloud. its strange purple
tnts fading and dlssolvmg into"-Or.
But the contents Of this room-his
tailed description
20 strange, unt1thomable mystery Of
existence. compelling our purblind race
when, l say, I meet passage in a
thing. -The Pilot
The Only Kind She Knew.-Mrs.
Browne-"A1rs. Witty is for ever talk
ing about the repartee at her house when
she and her husband entertain.' Mrs.
Malapropr l suppose that's some
cheap kind. always use Oolong, my
Sell. X ltsS
--:C:-
A rural correspondent Of the Ports
mouth, New Hampshire, Times sent to
his paper this ineligible account OF To-
cal episode.
"A man killed dog belonging to an
other man. The son of the man whose
dog was killed proceeded to whip the man
who killed the dog Of the man he was son
Of. The man who was a,; the son OF the
OH complaint Of the man who was as
sau1teii by the son Of the man whose dog
the man who was assaulted had killed.
\ Sure Result.-"Say, old chap, Golf
upp and l have bet we wish you'd de-
eide for u.s. mo, thanks" why, why
not? We're both friends of yours "Ex'
actly. So what's the use of my making
an enemy of one of you ?'-Life.
The teacher was showing her class
copy Of THE Angelus." and wanted to
know what the man and the woman We're
doing. The children apparently couldn't
make out, never having read the ''hoe'
poem.
After much suggestive questioning a
hand finally went up II know, teach |
err" said it's owner.
We'll. Johnny. what are they doing?"
piled Johnny, triumphantly.
Mildred (still blhshing)-"Am l the
first girl you ever kissed, Gordon?" Cor
don-"No. my love; but you are the last
Mildred-'Am /, really? Oh, Gordon.
it makes me 50 happy to think Of that
Town and Country.
"Weil. wei'' exclaimed Farmer Way
hacke, reading the Weekly Clarion,
which had just arrived, 1T says here:
Hon. Jason Strong of Pikeviile, who !
has. been barely alive for weeks, was
'"! T6e 'j dtc M'a 1peS lis wife, o.tx
terrible-they couldn't wait till he was
dead. eh:'- Catholic Standard anG
Times.
The Voice of Envy.-Aleddersrass
well. Ezry Hankins' th'mometer was
up to 40 in the shade t'day." Mrs Med
dergrass- sakes! them Hankinses
II be wuss stuck up than ever now
Baltimore American
"Bretheren and sisteren,' concluded
Rev. Washington johnson, II hab dem
onstrated abstrusely dat de Lord hates
10 offering. thefo' beg de- pusson or
pussons who stole vo' pastors hog to
make no contribution at de circulation of
de cffertory platter. Note-The collec-
ton beat all previous cords.--Princeton
Tiger.
A Bluff.-"Pa." said little Willie, look
ing up from his book, what are gas
tronomics|'' "Why-er-lemme see,'
said the old man. "Oh! they're these
country jays that blow out the gas
Philadelphia Press.
Ascun,-"That oldest boy of yours
seems TO have pretty bad reputation,
Mr.. Johnson
Mr.. Johnson-"Sho doan' b'liebe it,
Ascum-'So YOU don't think he's as
bad as they say?'' /
Mr. Johnson-"No. sah l don't b'liebe
he's ez white ez he's kalsemined, so ter
speak, az it were.-Philadelph Press.
The yell of the students at the Uniyer-
sity of Chicago commencement:
He's the Teller!
Who's the Teller:
Rockefeller!
Management-"Don't you think you
lose patience with your husband on rath-
er slight provocation:" said the near rel