Evening journal., 1901-08-10
CAUGHT AT RANDOM


Canada is now the only country I'm
the world Offering free land to home
seekers of limited means. Fifty thoii.
sand immigrants are each year enter
ing her ports, and 70 per cent of these
people go at once TO the Northwest ter
ritories
SAY, my boy l notice in a trade
journal that if you take a rumpled
suit of clothes and lay it away in a
drawer for two years it will gradually
regain its shape
Yes; but what am / to do without
any clothes for two years?"
Women with a past never refuse a
present
The strange power of a volcano was
shown in the last eruption of Vesuvi,,s
when a mass of rock. weighing thirtv
tons, was projected high above the
crater To do this, according to an
Italian professor the volcano exerted
force OF nearly 1000 horse power
There will be no newspapers left in
Finland it the Russian Government
continues its crusade Two dailieg
faJaiainen and Wiborgbladt, have been
suppressed, and the publication of four
o1her papers has been suspended for
periods Of from fifteen days to four
months.
First Policeman-Why is the street
so blocked Nobody told me about
this procession. What is it?
Second Policeman-Its the reporters
OF the city going to see the naval Off
Ger who won't talk.
When people begin to whistle bopu-
lar air all the sentiment is blown out
of it,
A machine that will do the work of
lhlrty expert mathematician is being
constructed by the government in its
scientific instrument shop on Capitol
Hill, in Washington. 1t is to be an
Improvement ON an instrument in use
IN the Bureau of the Coast Survey
which has charge of calculating the
tides.
Even a liar respects veracity-in the
other fellow.
Bozeman, and, in fact. the whole Of
Gallatin county, Montana. is afflicted
with scourge of dandelions They
are to be seen in every garden and in
nearly every field in the county. In the
Summer the little globes Of fluffy, cot
ton-like substances. containing the
seeds of the dandelion, float through
the air and alight in ever nook and
corner. No matter how poor the soil
the dandelion flourshes.
Misress-What was the policeman
doing in the kitchen. Nora?
Nora-Courting me. mum.
Mistress-Ihen he'll have to stop.
I'll not let you make a police court
out of my kitchen.
Justice Brewer. of the United States
supreme Court, has the reputation OF
being the best raconteur in Washing
ton. His fund of stories is endless,
and he seems to add to it daily.
The average man thinks it is a spe-
cial dispensatiOn OF Providence when
he gets something good that rightfully
belongs to somebody else.
The pen starves more poets to death
in year than the sword exterminates
in twenty centuries.
If the devil should run for office
Some people would think it a crime;
| But just like the rest of them
All of the best of them,
Il
The much discussed sultan Of Sulu
is physically one of the smallest OF the
worlds royalties. He is somewhat
less than five feet in height.
1T appears that the rich old man
| that Miss Getmoney married is not SO
old after all. He is only sixty-seyen
instead of seventy-six."
How very unfortunate"
Women dislike a womanly man as
much as men hate a manly woman
The archbishop of York has Just com
pleted his 18th year, but still carries
on all work of his position and still
reads daily fixed portion of ElindOO-
stance, which language he learned
when as older in India.
Mr.. Fuleish-I think Of getting a
new hat Would you suggest the style
it shall be?
| Miss Sezzit-Why don't you get one
of those new ones that have holes in
them for the ears?
Subscriptions are discouragingly
slow to the proposed memorial to Sill
Arthur Sullivan in London. Hardly
anything has been contributed in
this country nd-personal friends Of tn,
late composer will probably supple
ment the money on hand sufficiently
for the erection of a statue on tn,
Thames embankment.
1T isn't fair to bring baby James
out on the porch in the evening"
"Why?"
Whenever we do all the mosquitoe
leave us and go to eating him"
Paderewsh is reported to be at worl
upon another opera, the scene of whicl
is TO be laid in ancient Greece. ant