The Iola register., 1901-06-14

y
latest production that is too deep to
be appreciated in the State.
The Lawrence Journal approves of
the idea of u. f.. Dewey, supreme
court reporter, who says his idea of a
busy man is one having "a fit.
Thirteen men Of Mount Hope have
sworn not to kiss their wives for
year, and yet who shall say these
women are an unlucky thirteen.
a recent ruling forbids entrance to
the State penitentiary on Sundays and
Henry Allen says there would be gen
eral approval if the other six days
were included.
w. d. and Mrs. A. G. Elppey. of
Severance. have given $40. 600 to Balt-
er University, half for immediate use
for gymnasium and the other half
for endowment.
People who few years ago
knew horses would be worthless be-
cause everybody would ride bicycles
will note with interest that theaverage
value of Dickinson county horses this
spring is S2S.05.
Topeka Journal: The French will
use cannon to fight gfasshoppers with.
Unless they are larger than the Kan
sas variety the engagement will be as
bloodless as the ordinary French duel.
There has been organized club at
Wichita Of married men who will not
| kiss their wiv1s hereafter. What the
world needs is a club handyto belabor
the man who kisses where he has no
right.
Most of the profanity in Ottawa is
caused by the awnings which hang low
over the walks. Several accidents
have been narrowly averted when
citizens were doing some tall talking
beneath them.
The journal says Mayor Hughes is
so tired of being mayor of Topeka be-
cause of the nemerous applications for
| jobs that he finally offered the job of
mayor to the urgent applicant, but it
was refused.
An Usage City man gave around
| cigars because he has n daughter.
And by the time she grows up she win
probably join an anti-nicotine club
and refuse to speak to the sons of any
Of the smokers.
Somebody stole Jerry Simpsons S
purse in Kansas City the other day.
Now if Jerry were not opposed to
socks on general principles he would
| probably buy some female hose Will. "a
purse in the side.
Seneca must be a mighty good town.
| The Tribune has wide open knockers
column and yet last week one man
kicked on banana peels and the other
on dogs. Think of wasting such a
chance on a dog when one might
roast ncighbor!
An eastern club has decided that
women do not romp enough and so one
of the Lawrence women S clubs is ptan-
ming n picnic where all the members
will tear around like giddy young
things. Lawrence surgeons and train
ed nurses are awaiting developments.
Kansas has over 62 millions on
deposit in her banks and owes State
debt of 1861 600 all held in the school
fund. And if ever Mary Ellen Lease
and her illl come back to give in
strHctions the whole state will take
her advice about crops-becauseo ofher
return.
A young printer at Colony has de-
yised a mechanical contraption that
enables one man to operate a Wash.
ington hand press. Twenty years age
his idea would have made him rich
today the Washington press is nearly
as rare a sight as a man with courage
to try running it.
A Kansas physician is credited witt
having discovered peculiar germ il
the blood of an albino, which proved
by experiment to transform animals
inocculated with it white hue.
black negro was changed to tan ant
1t is possible the race problem may bC
solved.
Barney Sheridan wants Miam
county people to quit prosecuting tn,
joints and spend the money on rocl
crushers. He doubtless thinks if th,
roads are what they should be half IT,
evil of being drunk would beobviated
It's an awful jag that can't navigat
} on pavement.
The Olathe News Herald, among it
r helpful hints to its readers about hoy
t to get along in life, suggests that the
, save penny this year and doubl
their sum each year. At the end {
IulIuy gtuIS all Juo f6SlueulS OF Oldln
/ would be worth S2l Ala, S66. 47each, tn
Herald would not ask for more tha
the last four figures for its hint
Watson Montgomery, colorcd, c
, Osnwatomie, took long snort frOI
his whisky bottle aud discovered tha
it was carbolic acid after he ha
swallowed IT, 'en who drink Kansa
whiskey oYp,.' it'o burn like live coz
all the way down and hence these a,
cldents are never discovered until II
tears are wiped away and the drinkC
, looks at The bottle to see how much
left.