The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1901-05-05
FUN OF THE WORLD.

tracted the general attention BY saving
70 the scientist Professor. I should
IKE TO ask You q question: Why Is II
tat the liquid at the bottom OF a bottle
IS more Intoxicating than the leuor at
the top The scientist. al unconscious
or the Iun lurking in the question. r.
piled. Wen. I never had my attention
called 20 that fact. Are YOU sure thar
u Is fact Yes, rejoiued EvartS.
with perfectly grave face while the
OF laughter, 7 know men who have fire.
quently found by actual experience that
L is so"
zsz
Minister WI Ting Fang told q story at
the exercises ar the Gauaudet COLLEGE
for Deaf Aiutes Wednesday afternoon. in
Washington, after assuring the young
people that while Il was unfortunate, OF
course. 20 be deaf and durab. there were
compensations
Twelve hundred years ago. he said, a
great general restored the Emperor OF
CHINA 70 his throne The Emoeror. in
ms gratitude, gave his daughter IN mar
rage TO the son OF the general Things
Went wen FOR time, as with ali young
married people, said Mr.. WI, and then
came The falling out
4he young husband told hts wife that
she must not assume too much hauzht-
mess Of spirit, for his father had nat her
tather On the throne and sustained him
there IN the exercise OF his cesnotfc
power.
The young wife replied that her father.
the Emperor. could behead the general
who, after all. was not OF much account
ana so followed much strife into which
the parents of the young coupIe them
selves were drawn.
Finally all concerned appealed % the
emperor for q decision OF the vexario,ts
questions that had brought SO much mis-
cry into the young lives.
me emperor. who was a wise ard good
man replied; There are times when il
is best for fathers-in-law ard mothers
in-law 70 be deaf and dumb"
X < Z <
curate UP North. having nreached a
very clever sermon on the Sunday. called
upon certain colonel on the Monday
especially to ask his opinion.
How did / like the sermon2" said the
colonel. Very much indeed. It's one
OF ms favorites."
"o9e OF your favorites?" starmered
the curate, slightly puzzled. Il do not
The colonel regard him with a twinkle
at the back Of his eyes. "Of course. 1
won't say word, he said but L knew
very we'll that YOU stole IT, and also
where you stole II from
Sir. said the curate. and ne spoke
from out the Whirlwind Of his righteous
Indignation 4 am not in the habit. sir.
or stealing my sermons. ! fear you are
iaboring under a mistake. and-er-for-
getting yourself, sir. I must ask you 20
apologize"
The colonel was silent moment. Then
he said. 1T may be that have made a
mistake. Wait moment / viii make
sure"
Going 10 his bookcase. he took down
tome Of sermons-a rare and al
most forgotten work. He turned 10 a GER
tain page, and an apologize, humble look
came upon his face as he glanced UP at
he curate. Il beg your pardon" he said.
Il apologize You did not steal II after
all, for find It is sim here. Ny mistake.
sir; my mistake"
gg BEE
Blaine at one time in his career was.
IS regards consular officers. in favor Of
4 limited tenure of onice-or. at any
rate. he believed It 70 le for the good
II the service TO change consuls from
'frice to Office occasionally. in order 20
gain a wider and more varied expert
,nce.
ne sat IN his room at the state DEPART
nent one day discussing different mat
ers Of public interest with 1lr Evarts.
hen his immediate predecessor IN onice. !
Now here said he. 'is case ia
'oint- This man has been consul al I'm
lung for twenty years. He went there
Z the time Of the war. and has remain I
d there ever since. II is time ne came
lone and got acquainted with his own
Ountry before he grows q queue. II he
tags much longer he VIII have a Chi
iese bias in his sight I shall remove
i'm at once"
I wouldn't remove him. Mr.. secreta-
y, replied Mr.. Evarts, quietly.
why not2"
7 am afraid it win be an unpleasant
hing 20 do. To be vulgar, I fear IT VIII
make a stink"
My mind is made up" replied Mr..
Elaine. as soon as I can find a good.
we man 20 take his place I shall re-
love him.
But I think you viii have grave DIFF I
Guilty in finding a good live man who !
'ouid be willing 20 take his place"
1 anticipate no sIcn difficulty But I
ill you explain &c me. Mr.. Evarts. why +
here VIII Be any difficulty, and-I con-
ess I fan 10 UNDERSTANDABLE Il viii. TO 7
Sc your expression, make a stink"
Because the man has been dead and /
uried these SIX months. Mr.. Secretary"
* *
The most original joke I ever heard i
{, said an old-timer % the Kansas
~ r-A AtfA-f "a AAaaA AA sHaHfHfI~
eeper at Kit Carson % the early days
arson was typical frontier settle
ent IL had drawn within its bounda-
IS mixed population Of hunters. gam
ers. soldiers. Mexicaus, frau women and
afers. with occasionally an industrious J
an who was willing 90 work Tor bis
wing. In the summer 81 1871 the town
rev frightfuIly dun and the boys hal
enty 81 time in which % practice the
Write q ~ a.
king one day old sam Tate. who kept
e AlhamDra saloon and dance ban. was
.costed by a man who professed 10 be-
sirous ~ obtaining employment
want work. dye" said SAM Well
"a don't look Ike a man that wanted
very bad
DO But / Do persisted the man. and 7
q willing 10 do anything
Kin you turn a eTindstonee' quarfed
IN. as the bright idea struck him.
% I certainly kin responded fhr Htran-
q, whereupon Sam closed q contract f
IN hiru - stand in front ~ lhe Alhar1-
a for thirty days turning "a griulrfone.
s pay lo be a. the rate ~ g. ~ p day
The next morning an - Carson drift y
around o. witness the cur.ogs rrer- :
Gle ~ a man turning grirfetore. earn .
rt cur word fhat anybody who bad
80. knives Or toois ~ anV sort o. shaf-
r could have u done free q fha Al
mbra- The news quickly rrreaa ard =
On TIE saloca arc re aifrwefE lr
1rt 20 70 were crowded With -nfsces
le1as crowd - people ufrh 4 rnis-rra- A.
ous ccLecfio1 ~ ElI iFnrs enaenra ina 2
NOR ~ ths nifuafion vent f1rre 81
1ry oody and period ~ coresgfsHfv 8
- i1aeEgrated such ar the tsun ha
Fer known before Day after Eev She r.
ueut man a. ire arfr1ate-r talrf - b
TAX ard day after day tnr ta- -