Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1901-06-15
THE AMERICAN HOTEL INDICATOR.
1t Plays Sad Tricks With the mex
perienced In England.


From the London Onooker
Come said. recollecting that Come
is the term one generally uses in America
when a knock comes to your bed room
door, and as was staying In hotel which
boosted that it was run on American prin-
ciples 1 wished to show that l was accus-
toned to American manners.
A smart page boy entered the room.
bearing a lemon and pair Of squeezers on
a tray. 1 looked at him in establishment.
what have you brought me lemon
for?" I asked Els this delicate Ameri-
can attention.
you ordered one, madam
81 ordered a bath" l said, land I don't
think that even in France they would ex-
pect you to wash off the dust Of three
pair of squeezers."
Sorry madam. but the indicator pointed
one up to So"
Perhaps 1 set the indicator wrong" I
said: but it doesn't matter. VIII you
please order me bath or tell the chamber
maid to come to me?"
Sorry madam but I'm attached to the
Indicator only. You must be careful how
you set it; place the finger on the disk at
the word hot bath"
that. l followed the instructions most
carefully. But if you can't order me a
bath you can go. Leave the lemon. please"
I set the indicator very carefully for the
knock on the door. I had not to wait long.
however for the Indicator was certainly
answered more promptly than any bell I
ever rang. fresh page boy knocked at
of mild surprise on his face when he saw
me. mo. So was evidently not the sort
Of party whom he expected would order a
glass Of port wine at $50 am
oil h; 70 y,lo he -lra he
table beside the lemon before I spoke.
Il wanted a hot BATH" 1 said, ''and you
have brought me glass Of port wine. Are
you boys playing a practical joke on me?'
Certainly not. madam: l am sorry, but
the indicator pointed to port Wine and It
was my business to fetch 1t to room So"
Then l certainly don't understand the
for I suppose you are not allowed to order
me bath?'
mo. Very sorry. madam. but I am at
tached to the Indicator; can't take or give
He wound up the machine with an air Of
great superiority. and then left the ROOM
| sat down and waited to see what would
happen.
"A still more startling knock came to the
door, and this time full-grown man ap-
peared. cab at the door. madam; shall
take your luggage?'
despair. I'm in my dressing gown! I or
dered hot BATH
Very sorry. madam. but the indicator
pointed to night porter and cab"
For heavens sake" l said, go down
stairs and ask some one to order me
bath, and send the cab away"
I'm sorry. madam. but the bath is out
Of my line. but I'll send the cab away" In
a moment he had disappeared.
l searched the room for an honest bell.
but there was none to be seen, so there
was nothing to be done but to try the indi-
Gator again. 1t was evidently a very deli
cate machine which required knowing.
In less than five minutes the first page
boy who had brought me a lemon bounded
into my room carrying large pitcher Of
iced water on his arm.
You young wretch I said. you know
quite we'll that I have been indicating for
a bath for the last half hour and more
Why did you fetch up that iced water?"
Sorry. madam" he said. with a merry
twinkle in his eyes. Its my duty to fetch
up to the rooms whatever article the finger
on the disk pointed to; we've got to do it
quick and sharp. I'd have got into trouble
If hadn't attended to my orders"
Il wish to goodness 1 said, that there
was a sensible bell in this ROOM or that one
of you Indicator boys was allowed to carry
a message. or that some one who isn't at
tached to the Indicator would come to the
door"
Very sorry. madam. but I'd get my dis
charge il l do anything but obey the indi-
Gator. Try the blooming thing again." he
suggested; sit might point to bath this
time; you never know your luck"
mere was nothing else to do but to try
my luck as he had suggested and this
time waited with some degree Of curiosity
to see what would appear.
The knock came to the door again fol-
lowed In moment by waiter with a Con-
tlnental Bradshaw upon silver charger
How l wished it was the managers head!
Put that Bradshaw down." l said. be
side the lemon and the port wine and the
iced water. I'm quite tired of playing this
game; ordered a bath. and all these
things have been brought to me instead
The waiter put the Bradshaw down on
the table and glanced at the Indicator with
supreme contempt These Machines he
said. may be all right in America. but
they don't seem to suit the English cIi-
mate. I've just been and fetched up a bot
tie OF whisky and soda water to an old
lady as occupies room IS. She's holding a
temperance meeting this afternoon. and
she thinks as how I'm playing a practical
joke her.
The other three times tried my luck, but
without success; telegraph forms. hot wa
ter for shaving, and a list of the London
theaters were fetched to me with great
promptness and a considerable DISPLAY Of
nice feeling. My last attempt, however
brought the manager; the finger had point,
ed to his august name, which afforded ma
an opportunity of expressing nv feelings
upon the subject Of American indicators
versus bells.