Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1901-09-07
WHAT A MAN CARRIES.
Weight of Clothing Which He Lift
Around all the Time.

MAN carries pretty good weight in
these modern times when you come to
think of IT, said gentleman whose
mind has an analytical turn, and real
~ itmakes a fellow a trine tired when
he begins to enumerate the number Of
things he is forced to carry around
with him. He is a beast of burden and
is heavily laden We will take him
from the skin out and analyze The
superfcialties which hang about him
and which are necessary at this time
in the history Of civilization in order
to give him a polite standing in the
community i'm which he lives. and In
order to make him comfortable. one Is
almost inclined to shrink away from
the fearful responsibility OF carrying
such a load, and yet one must do II If
he is happy. Here are the two articles
which sticketh closer than a brother,
and then we find pulled IN around his
shins and ankles two socks. He wears
two shoes, unless he was in the wal,
and two strings are needed 10 lace
them, or twelve buttons or more, II
they are not lace shoes. He wears one
top shirt, one collar and two cuffs. lie
wears one coat, one vest and one nalr
OF trousers, and there are twelve but
tons on his trousers, six generally on
his coat and six on his vest. He car
ries two cuff buttons around with him,
two collar buttons, three shirt buttons,
two sleeve buttons and various other
buttons on his undergarments. There
Is one buckle on his trousers and two
on his suspenders. He generally wears
suspenders. He wears two garters. He
wears one necktie, or sometimes one
cravat with one clamper to hold il In
place.
"He carries one handkerchief in his
pocket He wears one hat. In the win
ter ne must have two gloves and one
overcoat and may be two overshoes.
But this is not all. He has watch and
chain TO carry around with him,
bundle Of letters, a package OF cards,
a plug or a sack Of tobacco. or may be
a few cigars. a pipe perhaps. a pencil
and few other things which usually
make up the pocket outfit, such as
matches, buckeyes and other good luck
symbols. There Is leather in his shoes,
with hair in the soes and steel pegs in
the heels thereof There is silk or satin
i'm HIS cravat or necktie. There Is wool
and cotton and linen and other things
In the clothes he wears. There is straw
I'm his hat. There is starch in his
short. There Is gold and silver and
pewter and other metals In the watch
and the chain he wears; there Is brass
and bone In some OF his buttons. There
is tin IN his garter clampers and In the
clamper which holds his cravat in
place. There is glass over the face OF
his watch. Dye is used in staining his
clothes, and one may find here all the
colors-red, white. blue, black, purple.
yellow brown and almost every other
tint. He has paper in his pockets.
There is rubber In his suspenders and
carriers. Paint Is found in the figures
on the face OF his watch, and polish Is
found on his shoes. So after all, man
is really a beast Of burden, and when
he begins to count up the more than 100
superficialities he carries around with
him. and the vast numbers OF factories
he represents. II the season Is warm
with the thermometer ranging above
the 100 mark. he viii probably swelter
bit more on account Of the vast load
he is carrying. New Orleans Times
Democrat