The Lewiston teller. (Lewiston, Idaho) 1900-1905, 1901-12-05

new winter coat Ill have to wear my
nd one. Clara-Oh, you dear, sweet.
lovely, generous old boy!
"Yes, my DEAR" said the sarcastic
hubby; you may have made the cake
I'll alone, as you say. but who helped
I you to lift it out Of the oven?"
At the church door: Are You ore Of
the wedding party? ?" asked Mr.. Fresh.
the usher. "Only the groom. Dor't
mind me-" replied the prospective VIC
tim.-Baltimore World
Minnick-Well. there was one thing
remarked about your wife the first time
saw her-she was undoubtedly out
spoken. Henpeck-You don't say! BY
Observation-Disclosures Press.
Bridget, were you entertaining a
man In the Kitchen last EVENING""
Twill, mum, thot's f'r him t. say OF
done me best wild tn intervals at hand.
mum" Philadelphia Bulletin.
Showing John Bull Around: "And
what IL this?" asked the visitor. This
- Wall street. 1t Is the most cele-
DRAFTED Of all our American watering
places."-Our Dumb Animals.
a good thing: Consulting Physician
DO you think the patient can stand
m operation? Family Doctor-Can he
stand It? Why. my dear sir. the man
r millionaire.-Tow Topics.
The hero: "Who Is the hero of this
piece r asked the man who was COM
Ing out Of the theater.. And the mana
ser thoughtfully replied: 1.-THE man
who i putting up the money" Wash
lngton Star.
Mrs. Murphy Ito her husband, excit-
odlyl- Run, run for the doctor. Pat The
child has swallowed the halfpenny you
gave him to play with. Mr.. Murphy
Oh, keep your mind easy. Bridget; It
was bad one. anyway.-Tit-B Bits.
II this fast TRAMP asked passen-
ger, who was tired Of sitting at a sta
tlon It which the train was not sup
posed 70 stop. "Of course 1t is," was
The guards reply. II thought 90. Would
you mind my getting out to see what It
Il fast tor
Anastasia-- Didn't bury Mike. didn't |
I bury Tim. didn't bury James and
Jack ESQ think, william. it would be
wiser for me not to marry again. Will
liam Chance me, Anastasia, dear. Who |
knows but the tables may be turned
this time!-Ex.
: Lizzie, does yo' hab dat joyful feelin'
n yo' bones OATS always de forerunnef
OF 'possum for dinner?" "Um. l never
believes we's gwine ter have 'possum
till hab dat joyful feelin' In my stom-
.ach which is de after-runner Of habing
had him. Life.
6ilas-If amt better by Monday
week I'll send for doctor. Samantha
What's the sense OF waitin' till Monday
week? Silas-- Well, on Monday week
It'll be just forty years since had a
doctor. I'd like to make 1t an even
forty years, Samantha.
He lived untimely: II have often
thought Of what an unfortunate fellow
Jonah was" ''How's that?'' why. II
he had turned that whale trick In the
twentieth century. he'd have been in
every soap advertisement In the civiliz-
ed world. Denver Times.
1T used to be my ambition" said tho
bushes sman. ITO accumulate fortune
and then retire." WELL" answered the
friend. haven't you realized it?'' mo.
I've got the money, but don't dare re-
tire. I've got to stay awake night and I
day to keep somebody from getting It
away from me. "-Washington Star.
Some Of those foreign dishes on the
dinner menu were puzzle to me-" con-
ided the First Seasick- Passenger to the
Second Seasick- Passenger, as they
stood conveniently near the rail. "Puz-
xles?'' asked the Second Seasick- Pas
senger; Il guess they were. but ! gave
them all up long ago."-Baltimore
American.
II really don't know what to do"
said the vivacious woman. at Is very
difficult to please the world" '.What
ID the difiiculty?" asked her husband.
"PeOple are so unreasonable In their
II you tell all you hear they
say you are gossip, and IL you don't.
they say you are stupid and common
place. Washington Star.
EYES," said Farmer Corntossel, 'our
boy Josiah Is devotin' good deal OF
time to games an light literature jes'
at present" ''Isn't that a rather un-
profitable pursuitY' Yes. But, you
nee, all the cabinet Offices an big tliplo-
matte places are filed, SO reckon
Josiah feels that there amt much else
fur him to do at present.
ton Star.
Wife-Henry, can't you let me have
Bome money to-day? Husband-What