The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1901-01-27
measured dose from her hand. Involuntar
lily he shook his head at the bitter taste

Now go to sleep again.
Thank you, nurse" six murmured
you are kind"
Thus she went from one bed to another
of those who were set down for medicine
Then she turned to her heavier. more dis
agreeable duties, and. had you seen her en-
gagged on them you would have said that
never surely could there be a more capable,
more calm or more resolute nurse than
she. AS her person was instinct with grace
and gentleness, so her every action was
marked with the ease and certainty of
knowledge; her every movement was un-
hesitatingly, unhasting. swift and sure.
Yet she scracely knew what she did. Her
nerves were thrilling with excitement and
her heart was besieged with a nameless
horror As she moved about among the
beds she seemed for the. time to give all
her attention to each, but she was aware
all the while OF only one-the one she never
approached, the one secluded by a screen,
where man lay, pale and motionless, his
life feebly. feebly fiuttering. painting. strug
Cling like weak. wounded nesting in the
hand, and that hand hers.
Her round of duties accomplished for the
occasion, she sat down again at her table
behind the screen. She had a book, and
she loved to read. but the page was blurred
with picture Of a bed with screen about
il. Was the man dead? There on the table
before her were the ether and the little
hypodermic syringe which she should have
used. They accused her of neglect of duty,
Of crime! She opened the bottle and
poured little of the ether away. And
then she suddenly recognized what was
the horror that possessed her heart; it was
horror of herself. Her better, her true
self seemed to become detached from her.
TO stand aioof and to view her with loath-
ing:
1T is for Jacks saker' she protested to
herself For my poor brothers and Sis
ters' sakes,'
But her better self was not to be thus
quieted. And the hours were so long and
silent and dark. She did not dare to look
at the time lest she should discover how
many half-hour periods she had missed;
but she felt certain she ought to be think
ing again Of her poultices and other things
And her heart swelled up with compassion
and pity for the helpless patients around
her. in revulsion from the wrong she was
doing to the one behind the screen.
Poor, poor creatures" she murmured.
eve are all poor creatures!'' And tears
filed her eyes
She had risen from her table and was
approaching the fire to begin her poultics
making when she saw the door of the ward
softly open and admit tall figure. Her
heart stood still and froze with terror
Who was the visitor? Was it some one
come to discover, not what she had done,
but what she had omitted to do? The
figure-a man's--had come quite near be-
fore she discovered that it was Jack Ur-
quhart's.
why" she exclaimed, eft surely is not
near morning yet?''
Near morning? MOI" he answered.
'Why should you think it was?" And he
looked at her closely.
Because you said you would come back
when it was near morning. What time is
it, them" she asked.
Don't you know?' said he. at haven't
been gone much more than half an hour
from you
She gazed at him an instant in bewil-
derment. Then, as in helpless surrender.
she set down the pan in which she pre-
pared poultices.
of things once, and 1 was going to do
them again.
Something has upset you. my dear
Mary said he. you are not yourself.
Come and sit down.
When he had led her back to her table
behind the screen, she asked, what has
brought you back so soon?''
well" he answered, 81 don't quite
know. 1 couldn't keep from thinking of
Cecil poor chap. 1t worries me He's
very low. and it would never do for him
to die here, in our hands. How is he?"
She looked at him with terror in her face:
but she answered truthfully. as if he were
a Judge:
81 don't know"
Then he looked very serious and the
rudainess of his cheek changed to gray
ness before her eagerly watching eyes
She knew that Jack Urquhart had had
very lofty and scrupulous views OF duty.
and she feared him at that moment. He
said nothing for an instant, but he laid
firm hand on her knee. while he family
shifted the air that was strong with ether
you've split some ether. Mary" said
he softly; lit must have got to your head,
and you've forgotten to give him his in
lection"
She made no answer, but she watched
him take the bottle of ether and the hypo-
dermic syringe and depart She sat quite
still. in shame and Indebtedness. When
he returned, her eyes were wet and her
hands were folded in her lap.
els he all right?" she asked, giving voice
to her agony Of distress.
yes he said seriously and softly, 'T
think he Isl
"Oh, Jack. Jack" she whispered, at am
so glad-so glad.' And she laid her arms
on the table. and her face on her arms,
and sobbed.
"'Sh! 'sh, Nary" he murmured. laying
his hand on her hair and stroking it softly
you've upset yourself terribly, my dear
Shall / find the matron and tell her that
you don't feel fit to go through the night?'
"Oh. no, no, Jack" she answered, reso-
lutely, seeking to recover herself "Let
me stay-please let me stay! I'll be all
right presently! But must tell you, dear
Il must-what an awful creature I've been,
I did not want him to live. and 1 wanted
you to be richi"