The Scranton chronicle. (Scranton, Miss.) 1897-19??, 1901-05-25
A STRAlGHT-BAcKED CHAIR.
nemini.rent bachelor Tells uou one
Destroyed his Eapdest Iopes
in Youth.

81 have a deep aversion 10 straight
backed, square-huilt chairs of that
pattern" said bachelor insurance
man who was looking over furniture
catalogue the other day, says the New
Orleans Times-Democrat. 1T Is mere
prejudice. however. and is due To the
fact that one Of the eonfounded things
was the means. years ago. Of causing
a lasting rupture between myself and
the only girl | ever really wanted 60 ]
marry. Did | ever tell You the story =
No2 Well. its rather curious. had
just opened an office for myself at the
time, and the future looked particular
ly rosy.
"Bessie and I'll cnll her Bessie,
with your permission-had been en-
gagged couple OF months. and | cal
enlated that would soon be in posi-
tion that would justify sending out
the cards. She was dear girl. and
her only fault, If it could be called one,
was her extremely romantic tempera-
ment. She saw everything through a
poetic medium. and. knowing that TO
be the case. took care that our court
ship, which occurred at the seaside,
should be fun of moonlight ramblcs,
serenades and strolls on the beach. |
believe that was the way won her.
well, TO get to the point, things
We're going very smoothly with me,
when one afternoon-ls shall never for
get 1t If live to be a thousand sat
down at my desk to write report
to the headquarters. | was little
particular about its wording, and
somehow | couldn't get It started cx-
actly To suit me. At last pushed my
chair n little nside-I was sitting on
one of those straipht-bultn affairs, pre-
cisely like that in the catalogue-put
my feet on the edge OF the desk and
| tilted back to think the thing over.
| was nicely balanced on the rcar legs
and was rocking gently TO aud fro
when the door suddenly opened and
in walked Bessie.
As il turned out, she had dropped
in while shopping to say how-d'y-do,
but the sight of her startled me, and
before | could prevent II / had lost
my balance and was going over back
ward. Now. If there is anything on
earth more helplessly awkward, more
hopelessly grotesque, than man fall
ing backward in straightforward
chair, have yet TO discover IL. \ kan
garoo doing flipnaps would be para
gon of grace by comparison. All this
| fully appreciated as ] went over.
"They say that n complete pano-
rama of ones life flashes through the
mind in the throes of drowning, and
I'm inclined to believe II, for In the
brief fraction Of time was in transit
TO the floor ! recalled each of the
pretty and poetic incidents of our
courtship and realized that | could
never again be n figure Of romance 10
Bessie. She would always think Of me
falling over backward In that internal
chair, doubled up like letter J., with
legs waving in space-grabbing writh.
ing, clutching frantically at nothing.
nessl | hit the floor like ton of coal
and for "A moment was stunned. Tn,
first thing heard was Bessie gigglinp
Historically, and knew II was all over
To a girl of her romantic tempera
ment ] was thenceforward an impossi
bility. A week later she sent me bacl
my ring. She said, upon mature con
sideration, she had concluded that sh,
couldn't love me as she ought to.
wrote her rs nice n letter as could
and then / took an AK and smashed
that chair to everlasting smithereens
/ always use one of the revolving pat
J tern. They don't tilt"