The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1901-03-02

ry influences physignomy-th High
landers you know have rugged faces.
He-Yes; and that Chicago girl behind
me who lives on Prairie avenue, is plain
looking.-Harlem Life.
First Detective-How did you manage
to discover the scandal in their family
closet?
Second Detective-Well. you see, I had
a skeleton key.-The Smart Set.
The man whom women call 80 nice,
Who always leads away
The fairest, most enchanting girls
VIII come to grief some day.
Some day when he has need Of aid,
And turns to other men
The soft things he knows how to say
VIII help him little then
Washington Star.
Needer Harekut-Ah, this world is cold
and unsympathetic. 1t is almost fmpos-
sible for us poets to make any money
nowadays.
Job Scumfter-I think you're wrong
there. There's no prejudice against po-
cts. I know a man who engaged a poet
and gave him So 4 week to keep the Of
flee clean and run errands.-Philadel-
phia Press.
Why did they break off the engage
don't Know 4 saw a DalnGQ 63-
preston cross his face one night wher
she asked him if Joan Of Arc was
Noah's wife, but of course. a trivial
thing like that wouldn't cause It'll
dianapolis Sun.
While autos, bikes and equestrfans
On park roads take their flights,
The only rights of pedestrians
Seem to De funeral rites
The Smart Set.
Eyes. she couldn't speak to the editor
when she met kim"
Had ne offended her?"
I should say he had. His society re-
porter called her one of the last CEN
tury's buds-'-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Mercutio-Hammond considers himself
a great theatrical light.
Damon-That's right About as light
as I ever saw on the stage.-Boston
Transcript
It got my cutter down yesterday
did you ride " ''Nop-dusted it and
put it back. Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Tests quite likely that my uncle
will leave me quite a fortune. He's
dying, you know.
Jess-oh, isn't that distressingg
Tess-Elr--yes. I do feel sorry for the
poor old
Jess-Nonsense I was sympathizing
with you, dear To think that all this
wealth should come to you when it's al
most too late to do you any good
Philadelphia Press
When L saw the man lying sodden in
the gutter ] recoiled in disgust
You look just ike 80 centsl" I ex-
You ne!'. retorted he, ..for in that
case somebody would have picked me
It seemed to me the fellow implied
a rebuke in these words; anyway, I coll
ored deeply and passed on--Detroit
Journal.
Nipp-My wife worried all last week
for fear I should die.
Tuck-Were you sick2
Nipp-No, but my life insurance pol
icy ran out and it was several days be-
fore I got K adelphia
Evening Bulletin.
Il think I'll have to read that new
novel: they say it's fine. Have you
NO: 1 am afraid it's too long. Ny
wife bought a copy yesterday and she
only got half way through 1t while wait
ing for her change. philadelphia
Press
Mosher-'Gargel says he has lots sof
acquaintance, but hardly any friends
more acquaintance a man like Gargei
had the fewer would be his friends -
Boston Transcript.
Not He.z.I must confess I'm rather
superstitious. We'll, I'm not. would
MT be that way You wouldn't, chr
mo. it's a sule sign that you're going
to have bad luck when you begin to get
superstitious. ''-Philadelphia Press
you must give him hint" we said
when the fair young girl complained
that her lover was slow to. propose.
What sort of a hint can give
him ?'s
GIVE him tie. Detroit Free Press.