davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The age-herald., 1901-03-31
Progress of the South.
BY 4. J. ADAMS.

No man Is more enthusiastic with re- spect to the industrial future of the south than Mir Lypde Harrison, the manager of the Plant railway system. He asvvrNs me that immense Improvements and ex- tensions in the system, sn addition to those now in progress, are under adyiBo- ment and will be put Into execution as soon as the plaps can be matured. The new south" said he recently, Is today the best and safest field of investment in the world. In the north and east there Is scarcely a department Of industry which Is not overcrowded. Competition is hl- tense: expenses are eporfnouss taxation is, in many places. almost oppressive. transportation heavy and labor high, In the south these industrial conditions are reversed. The cost of living Is at the minimum as compared with the other geo. tions of the country, and therD is a pro- portionate diunlnution in all the other burdens that business has to bear. As to competition, 1t may be said there Is none in the great department of manufacturers That, of course, must come in time, but it is a long way off. In the other parts of the country nothing can now be done except on a gigantic scale The day of the small factory Is gone, It ia but be- ginning ID many parts of the south. It is n magnificent field, and with reasonable capital, industry and intelligence, success Is certain"
 MT. c. B. orcutt, the president of the Newport News Ship Building Company, is fully as enthusiastic as Mir. Harrison with respect to the future of the South. I've can," said he, build as good ship in the South today as can be turned cut in any part of the world. This is not an idle boast. The record proves 1t. We built the magnificent Oregon, and we have just constructed the Korea, the largest steamship that ever came from an Ameri- can shlpbuilding establishment. Bhc Is for the Pacific Mail Steamship Company.
 ''The South is destined to be the seat of a marvellous prosperity in every line of human activity. She has, flrst of all, the natural resources. and In the next place she has the climate. Capital. to be sure, is lacking, but that Is now turning her way in abundant streams. and the current will be steady one for years to come. More rapid progress is now being made in the South than in any other part of the United States
The age-herald., 1901-03-31

40 offense. is meant in saying
 hA( that bah games and beer
 INI gardens hardly belong un-
 SA der this head. When people get together in crowds we do not think of them any longer as being manly or unmanly. The individual traits disappear in the mass. It Is of the individual man we are to think in the query as to what is manly use for him to make of Sun day.
 Justice Brewer of the United States Supreme Court, one of the manifest men and one of the greatest jurors, attends church and teaches a large class in Sun day school Theodore Roosevelt seeks out the little, obscure Dutch Reformed church when fHe canes to town, worship ing devoutly in The church of his fathers With such examples no one will say 1t is not manly to go to church.
 great number of men weary with the weeks work turn Sunday into day of quiet recreation. They sleep late. They relax on Sunday morning. They are hard ly ready to read anything weighty till late in the day Home is so restful that they dislike to go out, either to church or anywhere else. Yet they prefer that the wife and children go to church. For themselves, they feel that they have had enough when the weeks work Is done, and they want to do, as nearly as pos sIble. absolutely nothing till they must start ir again on Monday morning. In the tremendous pressure that men are under in these days even preacher will hardly say it is unmanly for a man to use his Sunday in this way. He molests no one else. and prefers that his wife and children shall get the higher mean ing of the day. He grants that physical rest Is not the highest use of the day, although that Is it's only use for him.
 Thero are other men who spend the Sahbath about home for whom the ques- tion as to what Is manly must be realised. Granting that they need the day for physical rest and that 1t is not unman- ly tomake that the sole use of the day, AA C. C. A& & . . (
The age-herald., 1901-03-31
The Head Flaurer.

Towne-Judging from Bragg's talk his connection with the great corporation must be a regular sinecure.
 Browne-Indeed!
 Towne-Yes, he says he's the figure head of the concern. That sounds big
 Browne-O' he's the bookkeeper. Is blowing away the circulation of the paper. He is saying the paper has enter ed upon an era of unprecedented prosper ity. In a minute he will go up stairs and chide the editor for leaving his gas burn ing while he went to get drink of water, and he will dock a reporter four dollars because a subscriber has licked him and he cannot work Little children, if we believed business managers went to heaven we would give up our pew in church.
 The badman.
 Here Is man who has juststopped his paper. What miserable looking cre- ature he Is. He looks as if he had been stealing sheep. How will he know what is going on, now that he has stopped his paperr He will borrow his neighbor' s paper. One of these days he will break his leg, or be a candidate for office, and then the paper will say nothing about 1t. That will be treating him just right, will 1t not, little children?
The age-herald., 1901-03-31
Better If He Had.

Coming home rather late one night old Jones discovered a country yokel with a lantern standing by the kitchen door.
 Young man" he asked. what are you doing there?"
 I've come a-courtin', sir"
 "A-courting? What do you mean?'
 Well, I'm a follower of Mary, the kitchen maid. sur
 Do you usually carry lantern when you are on such errands?" asked the old man. sarcastically.
 Yes, sur. aIays."
 Don't tell me such nonsense. You had better be of quickly-courting with a lan- tern. indeed. In my young days I never used such a thing"
 No, sur." replied the yokel, siding off, '' Judging by yer missus, I shouldn't think yer did
The age-herald., 1901-03-31
.She PvMtevMan.
sss,.sssss:s:..s:s:ss:assss:sssass:ssss

Eugene Field made the world laugh and think, and there is still the same profit and amusement to be derived from his unique sayings. The American Type Founders Company has just issued a lit- tie inbrochure on tbs "Printerman," which was one of Fields original gems. , Although of especial interest to the news paper man, 1t also may make those who know him smile, tee. So we reprint 1t:
 The Proud Man.
 This is the man who has had a notice in the pager. How proud he is He Is stepping higher than blind horse. If he had wings he would fly. Next week the paper will say the man Is a measly old fraud, and the man will not step so high.
 The Foreman.
 Who Is this ferocious looking man? He Is foreman in a printing office. He gets paid for throwing men down stairs when they come up to nck the editor. for putting wrong dates at the head of the paper, He can pi mere type in fifteen minutes than seven printers can set up in two weeks He loves to ask the editor for copy. If 1t were not for him the pa- per would look pretty well every morn ing Everything would be fat and none of the live ads. would be left out.
 The Proof-Reader.
 See the proof reader. He has been reading the proof of a medical conven- tion He is swea ring, He. Is reading the Bible. You can not the Bible. 1t is locked up In an iron box in the editors room. The proof reader is saying some thing about damning something. Per haps it Is the creek
 The Printer.
 Behold the printer He Is hunting for a pickup of half a line. He has been hunting for two hours. He could have set the half line in twenty seconds. but it Is a matter of principle with him never to set what he can pick up. The printer has hard time; has to set type all night and play pedro for the beer all day. We would like to be a printer were it not for the night work.
 The Editors Knife.
 Here we have a knife. It looks like a saw, but it is knife. It belongs to an editor. and 1t Is used for sharpening pen els, killing reaches, opening champalgne bottles and cutting the hearts out of bad men who come into the office to whale the reporters. There is blood on the blade of his knife. but the editor will calmly lick 1t off and then the blade will be as clean and bright as ever
 The Editors Home.
 Here Is a castle. It Is the home of an editor. It has stained glass windows and mahogany stairways. In front of the castle is a park Is 1t not sweet? The lady in the park Is the editors wife. She wears costly robe of velvet trimmed with gold lace. and there are pearls and rubes in her hair. The editor sits on the front stoop smoking an Havana ci- gar. His little children are playing with diamond marbles on the tessellated floor. The editor can afford to live in style. He gets S75 a month wages.
 The Business Manager.
The age-herald., 1901-03-31
An Unkind Cut.
From Punch

From Punch.
 Miss Withers Showing photograph of herself)-I'm afraid its rather faded.
 Binks inexperienced, aged 19)-Yes, but it's just like you.
The age-herald., 1901-03-31
Confession Not Necessary.

From the Chicago Record.
 "Why have hunorists never orKanized into clubs?"
 Because the law doesn't require any man to incriminate himself"
The age-herald., 1901-03-31
Frailty of Axloms.

From the Detroit Free Press.
 "Constancy of purpose is one potent factor in success"
 "Oh, I don't know: I've often accom- plished big things by merely changing my mind''
The age-herald., 1901-03-31

s. Smith, former deputy state attorney of Maryland, may not be without local par allel: while I was in the state ateor- nev's office had to try a case against an otherwise honest German for selling liouor on Sunday The defendant had re- tained a certain member of the bar who is noted for his high voice. During this attorney's rather loud address, his Ger man client looked on in rapt admiration and he was heard to remark:
 ".Ach, dots der kind of lawyer to haf yet
 "Why?' he was asked.
 "'Because,' was the reply. he hollers so loud he scares der jury
The age-herald., 1901-03-31

0Ew YORK, March So.-'The
 1AI1 south is rapidly becoming the
 IN faver1te field of investment for SA northern and eastern capital Within the next decade thousands of mill lions of dollars will am not afraid to predict, be poured into the vast territory below the old Mason and Dixon's line, and that entire region will be, long be- fore the middle of the century is reached, as great and perhaps a greater wealth. producer than Is at the present time any other group of states In the union
 To one of the foremost promoters in the city, the question was recently put, what of the south industriaily?" and the above was the reply. For obvious reasons l withhold this gentleman's s name. During the last five years he has organized scores of industrial com panies, which are now in operation In various cities and towns from Richmond to Pensacola, and he expects to have at least a dozen more in operation before the apple blossoms whiten the northern orchards.
 He told me Of one immense operation that is now on the eve of accomplish ment It contempiates the transfer of 8 very important hraI3ch of cotton manu- factureS from the east to the State Of Mississippi, very near the line of the Lou isyiile and Nashville Railroad. Seventy thousand acres of land have been secured and the project contemplates the build ing of a good-siged town, and, of course, the erection of large mills. There is valu- able timber on the lands which have been acquired, and expert lunlbermen will be brought from Michigan to prepare 1t properly for market. The Louisville and Nashville has agreed to build several miles of road to the proposed new town The money to be invested ih these two enterprises, which will be controlled by the same combination of capitalists, is upward of S20o0,ooo,
 A great ship-building establishment and dry dock is one of the rich acquisitions which Pensacola can reasonably count upon in the near future, A company hav- ing this object in view was Incorporated this month, and the New York men In terested in 1t are confident that they will be able to obtain all the capital required
The age-herald., 1901-03-31

His Strenuous" Voice, From the Buffalo Commercial, The following aneedate. told by. William
The age-herald., 1901-03-31

~. R. BRYAN tells us the Re- A/AI public cannot exist on the INVH mainland with an empire at [10A tachment in the Islands.
The age-herald., 1901-03-31

Our new constitution is net te ignore the negro. Far from it. When the prob lem of public education comes forward
 our new constitution will solve it. The solution will eliminate nc Godsordainsd
The age-herald., 1901-03-31
The Editors Home.
The Business Manager.

Here we have business manager. He
The age-herald., 1901-03-31

SEW YORK, March 3o.-"The
 II south is rapidly becoming the favorite field of investment for
The Somerset reporter., 1901-12-26

well known Edinburgh professor
often became SO interested in his sub
ject that when the noon bell rang ht
seemed quite obliyious of the fact and
kept the class for several minutes. Ger
tain restless spirits among the stu
dents decided to give him a gentle
hint. SO they bought an alarm clock
London Tit-Bits tells the result.
The clock. set To alarm nj precisely
10 o'clock, was placed on the profess
ors desk. As was anticipated. he be-
gan his lecture without observing the
clock But when the noon hour struck
the alarm went off with a startling
crash.
Even those not In the secret appreci-
ated the joke There was a round OF
applause The professor smilingly
waited until the alarm and the APP
plause ceased and then said:
young gentlemen, | thank you for
this gift. had forgotten it was my
birthday. An alarm clock is something
my wife has needed for our servant for
long time. 1t is very kind remem-
brance on your part" Then he Went
on with the demonstration which had
been interrupted by the alarm. and the
students We're never quite able IL sat
isfy themselves whether the professor
understood the joke or not.
The Somerset reporter., 1901-12-26

Have you ever noticed that all anil
mails which chew the cud are cloYen
footed? Also that most of those which
drink water by suction are herbivorous,
the carniyorous variety tapping it with
the tongue, like the cat dog, tiger, etc.
Sheep have no teeth in the upper jaw,
and tortoises and turtles are without
altogether.
Unlike most animals, horses have no
eyebrows. and hares are minus eye
lids. Consequently the eyes of the lat
ter cannot be shut, and a thin men,
lbranous substance covers them when
asleep. The eye of the owl is also very
peculiar, seeing that it Is immoyably
fixed in its socket and cannot stir In
any direction. To compensate for this
seeming disadvantage II can turn Its
head almost completely round without
moving its body. If you were to keep
a frogs mouth open many minutes II
would soon die, as owing to its peculiar
construction it can only breathe with
the mouth closed,
On the other hand. fishes are COM
PEELED to keep opening and closing their
mouths in order to give their respira-
tory organs full play 1t is also a
strange fact that the deer has addi-
tional breathing places besides the nos
trls, as If nature had foreseen his
great need Of free respiration when
forced to flee before the hounds Snakes
usually have their teeth in the head.
but one variety in Africa. whose prin-
cipal food Is eggs. is provided with
substitute for them in its stomach.
The Somerset reporter., 1901-12-26

Beau Nash. like Beau Fielding and
Beau Brnmmel, was to eXpiate his con
temptibe vanity in an old age of OBJ
security, want and misery. As he grew
old he grew insolent and seemed insen-
sible to the pain he gave to others by
his coarse repartees He was no Ion
ger the gay, thoughtless. idly industri-
Gus creature he once was. The even
ing of his life grew cloudy, and moth
Ing but poverty lay in the prospect be
fore him. Abandoned by the great.
whom he had SO long served. he was
obliged to lily to those of humber sta
lions for protection and began to need
that charity Which he had never re-
fused to any and to learn that a life
Of gayety finds an inevitable end In
misery and regret.
A new generation sprang up to which
Nash WAS stranger. His splendor
gradually waned. Neglect filled him
with bitterness, and he lost thereby
the remainder of his popularity. His
income now became very precarious, so
that the corporation voted him an al
lowance of 10 guineas, to be paid him
on the first Monday in each month. He
long occupied house known MS Gar
rick's Head, subsequently occupied by
Mrs. Delaney, but he died in a smaller
one near by.-Nineteenth Century.
The Somerset reporter., 1901-12-26

ed, and It WIS his turn to answer.
(Which is the largest city fl the
worldp asked the teacher
New York. unhesltatlngly came
the answer.
Il mean TIE largest city IN tie
world" said the teacher.
As promptly came tie reply, view
York"
But" expostulated the teacher. Il
did not say The largest city II tie Init
ed States. bnt the largest CRY IL tic
world You surely know Which Is tie
largest city IN the world"
"<ew York" persisted the bo7
London has larger population than
New York. said the teacher. IF do
not have the correct answer this time,
l shall have to punish You Come
now coaxinely, tel ne tie name Of
the largest city Ia tie world
New York"
stay IN during recess ana write me
fifty lines"
lie wrote the fifty lines. and every
line read The biggest city IN the
world is New York. New York Trib-
uUe
The Somerset reporter., 1901-12-26
Making Clear.

To confuse a witness is generally an
easy task, and lawyers know no easier
way than to make witness explain
the meaning of his words knowing
that very few people can do SO without
getting excited. Occasionally a victim
resents this nagging and answers In a
spirited and unexpected manner. A
lawyer was cross examining a young
girl of rather naughty temper. She had
testified that she had seen the defend
ant shy" a book at the plaintiff, and
the lawyer had seized on the word.
"Shy-shy a book? What do you
mean by that? viii you explain to the
court what the word shy means?'
The girl leaned over the desk be.
meath the witness box, picked up u
lawbook and threw it at the lawyers
head who lodged just In time.
Il think the court now understands
the meaning of the word shy said
the judge gravely. and the girl was al
lowed ITO finish her testimony without
further rruption.-London Tit-Bits
The Somerset reporter., 1901-12-26
The Denr Old Frauds.

Those old, pleasant innocent frauds
of tie circus are not praetiee1 how
tile imposing, five barred gates that,
as the horse approached them. were
sloped into insignificant wattles and the
rings through which the sgnorina pur-
ported to leap. but Which in reality
We're insinuated over her by compliant
attendants And then there WAS that
venerable jockey performance. the cul-
mination of which was a leap from the
ring to Il standing position, albeit at
an angle of 80 degrees. on the horses
back. In the old circuses ii was the
custom of the horseman to miss the
browning jump two or three times in
order that fereer flame of interest
might be liindled in the audience. Aft
er two failures the band would stop
always the presage of a moment of
strain supremel, the horses head
would be loosed, he would be urged to
a greater pace, and the feat would
gloriously succeed. Then what n crash
of brass and outburst of delight in the
building, involving even the staff and
ringmaster In the expression of &C.
stasy. Those old. simple days.-Corn-
hill.
The Somerset reporter., 1901-12-26
A Desnernte Chance.

A Russian exile relates how he once
saved himself by desperate artlhce.
A police official searched his house for
compromising papers. There was In
his possession document the discoy-
cry of which meant serious danger to
himself and his friends.
Wherever he might hide 1t, it seemed
certain that 1t would be found. He
coolly handed the document to the
official, who scarcely glanced at 1t and
handed 1t back.
After the most careful search the Of
fetal, his nose blackened with SCOT and
his hair decorated with feathers, for
be had even examined the stoyeplpes
and the bedding, departed empty hand
aH
The Somerset reporter., 1901-12-26

A certain frenHa -. nt whom
The Young Ladies' }egG.al tells. had 50
much more thought for his patient than
for his own safety on one occasion that
he resorted TO an oNpedient which. al
though efiicacious might have resulted
In his own death.
He had been commissioned to bleed
the grand seignor and either through
timidity or nervousness had met with
an awkward accident. The point of
the lancet broke Off In the vein. and the
blood would not flow
That point must be got out somehow.
Without stopping to consider the con-
sequences to himself the surgeon gave
his highness a violent slap in the face.
This produced the desired effect, for
surprise and Indignation on the part
Of his august patient put the blood into
violent circulation. The vein bled free
ly, and the lancet point came out.
The bystanders were about to lay
hands on the surgeon when he said,
First let me finish the operation and
bandage the wound" This done. he
threw himself Mt the feet of the sultan
and explained his action.
The sultan not only pardoned him,
but gave him handsome reward for
keeping his wits about him in n critical
moment.
The Somerset reporter., 1901-12-26
AlIigntors and CrnendiIea

Alligators, according to the late Pro
fessor Cope, belong to n much more
modern genus than that of their cous.
ms the crocodiles. No undoubtedly ex.
tinct species of alligator has ever been
discovered by biologists, but those ami.
mails are fast being exterminated at
ne of their hides. Alllgators are found
in China as we'll as in North America.
The crocodile exists in Africa. south.
ern Asia and northern Australia. The
crocodile differs from the alligator In
preferring salt water to fresh aud in
being more vicious in its disposition.
The Somerset reporter., 1901-12-26
PROBATE NOTICES.
To Al pfrsons Interested In either of the
Estates hereinafter named
sgeoszf TUESDAY op DECEMBER


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