Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1901-11-15
HOW'SYOUR THINKER?
AN EAR-TUBE THAT MAKES
THOUGHT AUDIBLE.


Experience-An Old Fossil Gives Him Mas
Repertoral Tube by Which He Can Hear tn
Thoughts Of Others-some Account Of Hi
Unique Experience.
All kinds of fish come to reporter
net, and no man is so low that he il
not liable to furnish an item. Thi
time it was seedy.looking Used -to-be
sort of intellectual wreck; graduate
OF Yale gone wrong, and all that; 6
broken spar adrift upon Life's ocean.
Said ne, Heard anything worth
printing to-day?"
"Not much," replied, what have
you got'"
"Got! I've got more news than you
can print in a week."
"Well, for instance" said l.
"Say, young fellow; if you've got q
"bracer" about you. I'll give you 9
pointer that'll make you the envy ol
the whole gang"
I mechanically handed him two
bits, sure bis need was great, and knew
the need he would make of it. But
that dirty derelict took little tube
from his pocket and handed it to me
saying, Put that in your left ear and
you'll be all right"
I was about to fling the thing away
in diegust, when the old fellow excit.
edly caught my arm exclaiming:
"Say you fool; what's the
matter with your I don't look it, bu!
l used to be Washington man on the
Tribune for Old Greeley, and I worked
for Bennett and Childs and all the old
boys; rinde $4,000 q year dead easy
and that little tube did it. But you
can't booze and use that, and l prefer
to booze. See?
We'll, l must brace up. So long
just put that in your left ear and you
can hear everybody's thinker at work.
I looked at his shambling retreatine
form and said, half aloud, another
crank, unbalanced by drink" But
stuck the thing in my vest pocket and
thought no more about it, until, just
in idle curiosity, as l was looking fol
news yesterday, put the thing to my
left ear. So help me Goodness, the
thing was no fake; it worked to q fin.
ish. / was on Fourth street, and the
editor of the morning daily passed by
mot the local, but the one who does
the heavy work. His thinker was
working, but it was rather rusty and
this is all I could catch:
"The Averdupois Of Immensely il
good. I'll clip one on that The In
fiuence of Boston Beans on the Climate
OF Puget Sound ! can get that from
some Chicago papers, the Windy City
you know. The Reciprocity OF the
Contingent as Related to Socialism,
Bige Eddy can give me that, unsigned
of course. Let's see. How's thisi
The Retrogression of Progression on
the Evolution of Anarchy I can get
that from the St. Louis Republican
and these subjects are all replete with
local interest"
Just at this point he passed out ol
hearing. A prominent man passed by
and heard "Cockrels worth more
than pullets. I'll furnish tho eggs
I'll take my half in cockrels and she
can have the pullets. paid the odd
cent last month. You pay it thil
month. Tomorrow is the Sabbath
I'll drop q nickle in the treasury o.
the Lord; it pays to invest literally
in the'-and / lost the rest.
He passed on and sauntered into
the Woman's Club. Twenty ladiei
were all talking at once and such q
babel never heard before in my life
But it was all plain, everyday Wo
mans talk. Plainly my magic tube
was not working. l took it out and
examined it carefully; there was ap
parently nothing the matter with it
I put it back in my ear. 1 listened
intently but could not hear single
thought. Then l remembered, tn.
mothers, wives-and sweethearts wht
want to be wives-do not belong Il
clubs. There were no thinkers there
It was as silent as the grave.
As came out, one OF the peda
gogues was going down street. HI