The Independent. [volume] (Honolulu, H.I.) 1895-1905, 1901-11-09
Geo. AIDES Modern Fables

British General in South Africa.
He thought that the Cherubim
ought to sit up straight all Day and
keep their Hnnds folded.
Pa had impaired Circulation and
Fur on his Tongue and kind OF
Janders Complexion, and therefore
Life was sad and serious Game to
him. He wanted the children to
take.t the same Gloomy View of the
whole demnition Grind. He was in
a Blue Funk most of the time, and
it was his earnest Desire that the
whole Universe should wear Black
Border in order to he in Harmony
with his own measly state of Melan.
choly,
So when he had nothing else to
do he fixed up restraining Rules for
the Kids. He told them they must
not waller in the Grass or Climb
Trees or get into Scraps. When he
commanded them to keep out OF
Fights and Wrassles he seemed to
overlook the Fact that they were
the immediate Descendants OF
rambustious Individual who always
had two or three Law Suits on
hand and went about with a Chip
on his Shoulder.
He came down on them like 1000
OF Brick if they failed to be Polite.
He told them to say "Yes, Ma'am"
aud "Thank You" and always show
Respect for their Elders, because
that would be the only Chance that
some of the Elders had to have any
Respect shown to them.
He was S, ickler for Table Man.
ner'. 1t worried him if the Chill
dren failed to get a graceful Grip
on the knife and Fork and he in
sisted that they add "Please" when
ever they shot iu. Request for
more Chow.
Furthermore, Pop leaned over
from the Olympian Heights of his
all.round Superiority and talked
down to the Offspring about H abts
OF Industry. 1t cut him to the
Quick to learn that they had played
Hockey and scooted up. The Alley
when Mamma wanted them to run
brands. He said that in his young
or Days he had been great Help to
his Folks and used to make his own
Money and pay for his own Clothes.
To hear him tell it, he had been
Model Youth. He always wound
up Lecture by telling how he went
to Sunday School and always had
the Golden Text cinched and captur
ed the Prize for Keeling off 200 YER
ses OF Scripture.
Sometimes, when the three Chill
dren realized what p Sweet Child
their Male Parent had been they
felt ashamed and discouraged. be-
cause they knew they never could
Buck UP and duplicate his Juvenile
Career. 1t was pretty hard to I'M
derstsud how and why such an An
gel had grown up to be grumpy
Kicker, but they had Daddy's Word
for il that he had been the original
Fauntleroy, and whatever he said
went.
"When I was your Age" he would
say to his trembling Flock, 81 never
wanted to eat between Meals, and l
used to Buckle down to my Lessons
every Evening, until Mother would
take my School Books and hide
them to prevent me from running
my Eye Sight. never was Cruel to
Dumb Animate, neither was l rude
to little Girls"
This very remarkable Man had
two Boys and one Girl who were
permitted to live in the Shadow OF
his Greatness, The oldest child was
a Boy named Wallie. He was about
is and running principally to Legs
and Red Neckties. He was at the
Awkward Age. His Voice was chang
ing and he had outgrown his
Clothes and he wabbled and step
ped on himself when he walked. He
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