Evening journal., 1901-11-07
CAUGHT AT RANDOM


after being used on any person"
Mr.. Crimsonbeak-"Bl theirbreath
on it, suppose"
pa, why do they call this railroad
trunk liner
"Oh. l suppose some woman Travelled
over it on her way to a summer re-
sort along about the time they were
trying to think up a name for IT,"
"The weather man predicts probable
showers. but they don't come" re-
marked tho horse editor.
IF he'd predict improbable showers
he might have better luck, added the
snake editor.
Teacher-TOmmy, in the sentence "A
microbe is a minute living organism, 4"
parse "microbe."
Tommy 'Microbe' is a COM
mon noun, possessive case
-Possessive case?
Tommy-Yes'm First person, mi
crobe; second person, your crobe;
third person, his
Teacher-Thomas go and take your
seat.
"Will our new. country house be a
Queen Anne?"
yes; Queen Anne in front and Mary
Ann in the rear"
"Umg- bah -ger-uh!" remarked
the brakeman on the train going
through Maine, as he poked his head in
to the car.
An old lady beckOned to him and
sofbly required:
Young man why do you not pro-
nounce the names of the towns so that
the passengers may understand them?"
Madam" courteously responded tho
brakeman. 'if l could say those names
proper I'd be gettin' a thousand a week
in grand opery."
Il never expected to see England
relegated to the rank of suburb!' ex-
claimed the disconsolate Briton.
What do you mean?"
Il mean that it's getting to be too
much of a fad for people to live here
and transact all their business in
America"
'All talk about women not being able
to dress we'll on 5000 year sounds
funny doesn't it?"
Yes. Wonder what she does with
the money!"
Gets chocolate creams and matinee
tickets, spose."
Can he cook?" asked the proprietor
of the restaurant.
Cooke" echoed the caller. who was
roofing for a friend out of a job. Can
he cook? Say, I've seen that man
mako four SQUAD pies out Of one old
pigeon"
Jo1eph l.. Thompson. OF Franklin, N.
H., who is now in the S5th year of his
age, has taught school in that town and
vicinity for sixtty-hve years.
Prince Henry of Reuss. in Germany,
Dardons all the boys and girls convict
cd OF any wrongdoing in his small do
minions provided the parents fog them
in his presence.
Georgia farmers and planters are ap-
Ipealing to negroes to help them with
their turpentine getting. Builders OF
new cotton mills are greatly concerned
as to where they will get hands to run
their mills.
The Empress Engenie is now settled
down in her English home. II is re-
ported that the Empress is about to
build a small convent in the beautiful
grounds at FarnsborOugh Hill to the
memory OF her husband and their son.
Governor Taft. who has been sick in
the hospital at Manila, has undergone
a successful operation and is now re-
covering.
Residing in Washington at present
are three former mistresses OF the
. White House-Mrs. Letitia Tyler Sem
pie. daughter of President Tyler; Mrs.
Harriet Lane Johnson. niece of James
Buchanan. and Mrs. Ulysses S. Grant.
Dr. Nansen has a liking for bright
colors. That is why his ship, the Fran,
I was painted green, gray, scarlet and
white picked out with gold.
. Marshall Field the Chicago mer-
| chant. was born in 1885 on Massa-
! chusetts farm, and began business in a
I Pittsfield dry goods store when II, re-
moving four years later to Chicago. He
y has given extensively to colleges and
! founded the Field Columbian Museum
l. in Chicago. with gift of s1,000,0O0.
New York State farmers are buying
Z potatoes for their own consumption, &
n situation unheard of there for years.
A Munich publisher has issued ;
O. work in two parts on the oldest. big
~ gest and otherwise most remarkable
20 trees in Bavaria
'h NURSING MOTHERS