davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Coniuring the Sharks.

In the Persian gulf the divers have a curious way of opening the season. They depend implicitly upon the shark conjurers, and will not descend with out their presence. To meet this diff ficulty the government is obliged to hire the. charmers to divert the atten- ton of the sharks from the feet As the season approaches vast numbers of natives gather along the shore and erect huts and tents and bazaars. At the opportune moment-usually at midnight, so as to reach the oyster banks at sunrise-the fleet, to the number of eighty or 100 boats, put out to sea- Each of these boats carries two divers, steersman and shark charmer and is manned by eight or ten rowers. Other conjurers remain on shore, twisting their bodies and mumbling incantations to divert the sharks.
 In case man-eater Is perverse enough to disregard the charm and at tack a diver, an alarm is given, and no other diver will descend on that day. The power of the conjurer is believed to be hereditary and the eff cacy of his incantations to be wholly independent of his religious faith Lippincott's Magazine.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

WILLIAM W. ASTOR MT. AStOr rlSeS aL II a. m., and soon takes short stroll, looking aimlessly into the shop win dows. He invariably lunches alone. He insists upon always having the same table and the same waiter. The waiter must~give his undivided atten- ton to Astor, though customarily he waits on four tables at the same time.
 After lunch MT. Astor sits reading goes to the barber at 5:30 p. m., re- turns to the hotel, dresses and dimes alone at different place every night. Then he walks the boulevards, generally entering a theater toward 10 o'clock. He never stays more than 16 minutes, the French language having always re- mained inaccessible to him. He sits in the hotel bar till midnight, reading the letters and telegrams which his sec retary brings him only once day and always at that hour.
 MT. Astor detests cheese and when he finds it on his table he gets into a fury. The waiter, who resents the beg garly 15-cent tip given by the million aire, likes to provoke him and rarely fails to carry the offending article to the table. The other day when the waiter tried his game he found MT. As tor ready, for, as he saw the cheese approach, the millionaire seized wa ter carafe by the neck, saying: "You obstinate fool! If you put that nasty stuff on this table I'll brain you. Take 1t awayw
 The waiter withdrew.
 This style of life would hardly ap- peal to a healthy-minded American. Evidently MT. Astor is not happier abroad than he was before his expatri atiOD
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
A Dry Bath.

A Scotchman was once advised to take showerbaths. A friend explained to him how to fit one up by the use of a cistern and a colander, and Sandy accordingly set to work and had the thing done at once. Subsequently he was met by the friend who had given him the advice, and, being asked how he enjoyed the bath, Man" he said, ''it was fine! I liked 1t rale weel, and kept myself quite dry, too." Being asked how he managed to take the shower and yet remain dry, he replied: "Dod, ye dinna surely think I was sac daft as stand below the water withoot an umbrella ?''-London Tit-Bits.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

Within a few months thirty-fve wo- men have been brutally butchered by men in this country. In each case the slayer professed to be in love with the slain and killed her because the feeling was not reciprocated. In some cases the girl had made known to her parents that threats had been made against her life and the man had been bound over to keep the peace. But his bond was no restraint and he killed her. This erotic insanity is the most dangerous form of homicidal mania. It is treated lightly by the law or not at all. It generally appears in persons of evil temper and uncontrolled passions, who are not desirable company for any self respecting woman. It Is becoming too common, and in default of legal pro- tection should be dealt with sternly by the male protectors of women. When these erotics are arrested for making threats their offense Is treated all too lightly. Often the matter is regarded as a joke. Any man who forces his disagreeable attentions upon woman should be isolated and held either in a prison or an asylum. In 99 per cent of such cases the unreciprocated infatu- tion ends in murder Women are en- titled to the most complete protection against such brutes. The San Fran cisco Call thinks that If the law will not furnish 1t there is no other way than to kill the man who wooes wO man by threat of murder. If she have a male protector he should save her life, for she is doomed unless he act. If woman yield to the threats of such a man and marry him to save her life she makes for herself a lifetime of misery, for such men are perverts, de- generates or psychopaths unfit for the conjugal association. We do not wish to be misunderstood in these comments. We only say that 1t is the duty of a father to save the life of his daughter, or of a brother to save his sister. If he arrive on the scene when such an erotic beast is executing his threat it is his duty to kill the wretch, and the law holds him blameless. In view of the fact that such threats to kill are in- variably carried out, why Is 1t not the duty of father or brother to act In advance of the opportunity which the erotic assassin Is seeking.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

larly until about two months ago, when she became i'll, and could not do all the work required of her. The $3 week went unpaid until 1t had grown to be a debt of $25.
 The mother wanted the child and promised to pay the $25 in installments. But Mrs. Brushard refused. She de- clared she would keep the child till the money was paid in full. Magistrate Lemon was affected by the pitiful story and advised the mother to get out habeas corpus writ for possession of her little girl.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
The novel of many editions is no ney

The novel of many editions is no new thing. Fifty years ago 'The Heir of Redcliffe." by the late Charlotte NJ. Yonge, went through twelve editions in six months, and her novel, Daisy Chain," was also very popular. More notable than their success, however, was the disposal of the proceeds. The profits of the one book were devoted to fitting out missionary schooner, the Southern Cross, for the use of Bish- op Selwyn in New Zealand; and Daisy Chain" erected a missionary college in Auckland.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Too Late.

After hearing evidence In an assauir case between man and wife. in WaicA the wife had had a deal of prOvOeart0n. the magistrate. turning to the husband remarked:
 My good man, really cannot co anything in this case"
 But she has cut a piece of ny ear of, sir"
 Well" said the magistrate. n VII bind her over to keep the peace
 You can't" shouted the h1soand- she's thrown it away-"-LOndeR IrE- Bits.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Realized His Own Gadnsss.

''Now you are tired of me and abuse me-" sobbed the young wife whose hns- band refused to hire another maid 10 take care of her pet dog Yet. she continued, mot two years SEQ yOu were just crazy to marry me"
 ''Yes," answered the eOmplacenr man brute, "my friends told me so ar the time, but I didn't realize IL until after we were married. .n@Kansas City Srar-
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
rhe Kine and His Dog Tax.

A recent Greek law is to the effect that every owner of dog shall pay yearly tax of 12 drachmas. Those who do not pay in time are condemned by the new law to pay double tax. King George sent recently to the police in or der to register his four dogs and pay their taxes. But the official found that his Majesty owed for the taxes a sum of 4S drachmas, and had been fined another 4S drachmas for having de layed payment. His Majesty has paid 96 drachmas for his dogs.-St. James, Gazette.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

bor's to ''sit until bedtime" This ls si program did net include supper. but simply a merry chat, with apples and nuts, and all over by 10 o'clock. These old-fashioned informalities in the visit ing line were very pleasant in their time and made friendliness the fashion. It did not hurt a mite then to take friendly interest in pour neighbors' well fare, and 1t wcu.a 7ot hurt now. But somehow the cider the country gets the weaker grows our ties of sociaDii- ity; we read our daily papers, watch the markets, mind our affairs and don bother about the neighbors. The grange and the farmers club bring a spice or sociability where the farmers are or ganized, but will we ever get back to the good old back-woodsy way or let ting the farm and kitchen have a rest while we dress up and go visiting?
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
How London Could Be Defended

How London Could Be Defended.
 If the Dutch ever sail up the Thames again, or Norman force land, London will not be unprepared. In the archives of Pail Mall repose musty schemes for the defense of the metropolis which 1t was thought would be undisturbed un- til the War Department commenced to move into its new palace. But there are busy men about and as a result new schemes will be forthcoming for the defense of London. Something like sixty batteries of artillery will be allotted for the defense, including guns of heavy caliber, AT and 6 inches, which will be mounted in commanding positions, covering wide, sweeping arc. The mobile force for defense will include nearly 100 15-pounder field guns, and an army corps of three di- visions of regular infantry and 100000 volunteers.-London Express.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Handed Porter Rousseau Nanu-crip.


 Very queer tales sometimes attach t0 the journeyings of manuscripts. and the following is not without interest An elegantly dressed individual recent ly dropped in at one Of the Paris bOul- evard clubs, and handing a parcel t0 the hall porter requested him 10 mfnal the same for a little while The Otl- cial very naturally thought the parcel was the property of member, and az once deposited 1t in his cupboard where it lay till a day or two baek. when it was, with the sanction Of the President of the club, opened h was then found to contain a manuscript Of Jean Jacques Rousseau and a copy Of ''Le Roman de la Rose" These were duly examined by an expert. who re ported that the manuscript was per fectly genuine and worth at least 10000 francs, while the novel formed part Of a very rare edition of which only few copies are extant As the elegantly dressed gentleman did not reappear t0 claim the parcel its contents were handed over to the police authorities
 New brooms sweep clean-and old
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

It is too soon to tell whether the re- duction in the size of the page which several metropolitan daily newspapers are making is merely an advertising experiment or the beginning of an im- portant permanent change. The daily newspapers are much too large; they absorb so much time as to leave little for more serious reading.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

The report from Pennsylvania that young trades unionists are marrying the young women whose labor was brought into competition with their own seems to be in keeping with the tendency toward consolidation. Per haps this movement, started so mod estly in the Keystone State, may prove the key to a puzzling social and eco homie problem.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

castles, is said to lead a lonely life. The elite of British society have c u t him, and he Is now anxious to obtain a seat in France to which he may re- tire when things are not g o i n g smoothly with him across the channel. A corr espondent describing his life in Paris says:
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
The Rest of IL

q don't see why you aren't industri- ous and economical Ike the man nexr door," said the wife. You win scarce ly have time to get to your office in sea son. The man next door has his lunch in a basket and starts out at o'clock in the morning"
 "Yes; and goes fishing. ton Star.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

So we are to have a new rife which is an improvement upon any arm in the arsenal of nations In the matter of carnal weapons it is good policy to get the best, for the best not infre- Quently keeps outsiders from kicking up a disturbance. It is a case where prevention is very much better than ofTro
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Their Weak Point.

"So you don't think the autOnOb1s will succeed the horse for farm EOrkz asked the visitor.
 Nope" answered Uncle Silas. --hnG1- cially they would be a failure Whe1 they'd get old an wore out how eOu-d you turn lem loose in field by the rs-l- road sos they'd get kilt2 An even E you could, I doubt if the company Id be held responsible" - Indianapolis Sun.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
A Proud Record.

'I see that one of the newly appoint, ed patrolmen made an arrest within twenty minutes after he assumed his duties" said the observant citizen to the experienced policeman.
 "That's nothing" smiled the latter. e'I went to sleep while my commission was being handed to me."-Baltimore American.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Why He Broke Loose.

Mrs. Von Blumer-I thought you said that Mrs. Peterby had such thorough control over her husband that she made him go to church every Sunday. He wasn't there last Sunday.
 Von Blumer-No. He found it was affecting his golf.-Life.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

It has remained for Chicago to dis count the story about the theft of red hot stove. A couple of youthful burg lars in that city got safely away with a ferOcious watch dog which had been 'tied loose" for the protection of the nrpmiSpa
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Diagrams.

She-I see in New York every theater program Is required by law to bear plan of the house oD which the exits are plainly marked.
 He-Oh, is that what those things are intended for? I always thought those diagrams were dress patterns.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

A mother had a girl arrested for making goo-goo eyes" at her son. If mamma thinks the police can put shade over this kind of an eye she is laboring to mop back the Atlantic Ocean. The g.-g. eye is here to stay.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

The story that the Czar jumps two feet into the air every time anybody strikes match is officially denied. The Czar's bomb-proof room is also string fiendoffski lieovitch. It does not exist
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

4 man who has had some experience in Africa says that four men can hoid down a lion. One would not care to be the party designated to hold down the front end of the beast.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
A Tin in Advance

First Waiter-You see. the man gazs PetO a tip
 Second Waiter-What, Before hs got anything to eat?
 First Waiter-Yes-a tip that hs wouldn't get any if he didn't hurry- Puck.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

Agnes-In answer to the QuesCiO1- How can become beautiful in thirry days?" we would recommend thar y0a get pepper to sneak in on the righr siSls of the pork market
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Can Always FinI Words

HAThis author should be ashamed of himself. A married man. too.
 He-He says that a mans wife "gazed at him in speeches. astOaish- ment." Why, such thing is unknown in matrimony-Puck-
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

When Mrs. Wallig
 from her
 husband last July she arranged wit b h er r friend, M rs . Mary Brushard, to for the child. Mrs. Wallig agreed to pay $3 a week. She was able to meet Tho up, anfo rao,r.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Most Curious ThinE.

Mrs. Quizzer (whO wants to kn0E everything)-Now. what do yOu eOn- sider to be the most curious thing you ever saw, professor?
 Prof. TrOtter-A woman. madane- Harlem Life
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
ArithmeticaI Racking.

Jimmy, Sammy says you had mOrs caramels than the rest of the ehildrsn~
 Well, ma, seen they wOuldn't go round again, an so jes' had tO ear 'em."-Detroit Free Press.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Women Workers of Rri1ain

In proportion to Its population, the United Kingdom has greater number of women workers than any country, and among them no fewer than 616,- 900 are set down as dressmakers.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
He Knew Her.

eff you want to marry her. don't be so abjectly devoted. You simply cheap en yourself in her eyes"
 ''Then she'll take me. Mary never could resist a bargain The KinG
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Jinrikishas i'm Florida.

Jinrikshas have come to stay in Flor ida. The fad down there is to pose in one for the benefit of amateur and pro- fessional photographers.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
The Sense of Owner.hin.

'"There goes my train!' said the con- muter with exasperation.
 "If it's your train," said sarcastic bystander, ''why didn't you have it wait for youT-Sommerville Journal.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Beyond a Whianer.

'It is a great drawbaek to bs geErllg deaf"
 "Yes, it is; people quit telling you s> crets." s."-Chicago Record-Herald
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Chinese Rosaries

Some Chinese rosaries are made of wooden beads, with leather tassels, on which are small brass rings, and are finished at the ends with brass orna- ments and tags of leather.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
A Success,

"And they tell me colony hath been planted in Delaware. Hast heard how it is prosperingT"
 "MarvelOusly! The first peach crop hath been a glorious failurer'-San Francisco Bulletin.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

A French physician declares that the Chinese are very nervous people. It is difficult to see how they could be otherwise at present.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

A new device dispenses with the tele- phone girl replying to a call. It has been tried. and answers very well.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
The Situation.

"Yes; Roberts is going home because the war is over"
 And Kitchener"
 "Oh. he's going to stay because E isn't"
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
A PhiIanthrnnist.

She (haughtily)-I happen to know that you have already proposed to two other girls this year.
 He-Yes, dear, but I assure you 1t was only out of compassiOn.-Detroit Free Press.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

The rat gives it out to the plague doctor that he simply refuses to come out and be exterminated.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

Musician-I t'ink he's a true moosi- cian-a true artist
 Friend-What do you mean by that?
 Musician-Vell, true artist is one vot would love art for it's own sake if he could afford it.-Puck.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

A railway train made a spurt of nine miles in six minutes. Aguinaldo's best time is supposed to have been beaten by it.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

We face a great many of our troubles bravely, because the real fact is that we are so situated that we can't run away.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
With a Reckless Per.ian FIavor.

With Reckless Persian Flavor. My guess concerning An English. woman's Love Letters ought to attract great attention"
 ''What is it?"
 'T believe Omar Khayyam wrote them" ."-Chicago Record Herald.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

When a boy puts on long pants, he attracts more attention than he does when he gets married.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Eer,inir. S;,c.-Ff

Ted-He shutters so badly it took hin over half an hour to propose to her Ned-What did she say to hin7
 Ted-Oh, this Is so sudden--Judga.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
SUPPOSE WE SMILE.
HUMOROUS PARAGRAPHS FROM
 THE COMIC PAPERS.

Pleasant Incidents Occurring the World Over-Sayings that Are Cheer fuI to old or Young-Funny Selec- tions that Everybody Will Enjoy.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Wanted Speciflcatiors.

The farmer (wearing long bO0tsE Hey, sonny, Gyew want tew shine -sD for a dime?
 The Bootblack looking them OTerf- How far up?-BrOOklyn Life
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Of and On.

"He gets on spree occasionally, doesn't he?"
 "Oh, yes, off and on."
 ''More often on than of, I suppose. !" Press.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Q. D. oyer.on, PabIisher

No wonder England is sour over the Boer war. Her sugar had to be taxed.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Pie.

Pie that melts in your mouth Is as- tonishingly obdurate after it gets into your Stomach.-Detroit Journal.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Child Held for Board.

Little 4-year-oId Edna Wallig has been in pawn in New York for $25 board, which her mother could not pay.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

Don't you feel thrill of exultation every time you see those symbolic let ters U S.?'' asked the patriotic citizen, who had just returned from Europe.
 Yes" answered Senator Sorghum. And like lem best in the shape of monogram. They look almost exactly like dollar mark. ."-Washingt Star.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

Guess it's sure go bout lem goin' ter auction off this ere busted rail- road"
 "Why so?"
 "Well. by gum, seed red flags along the track in three or four places"
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Many Use Tobacco.

It is estimated one-third of the dwel lers upon earth are habitual users of tobacco.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

q want you to take me to St. Johns Wood, CabbiG"
 "All right, sir, but would you mind getting in the other side so as the old 'orse don't see yer?-Phil Mays An Dual.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
AnAdinnct to Tears.

"Perhaps you can direct me-" she said with pompous condescension to the foorwalker. i've crying need for"
 ''Yes'm," interrupted the foor-walker. in his quick, nervous way, "han'k'chief department, if counter, nex' aisle"
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

Praislng your rival may be gooG Christianity but it's poor politics.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

A brakeman refers to coffin as "s bone dish"
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

Most girls can play the piano just enough to spoil them for housework.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Art Cookery.

''What lovely brown biscuits shs makes!"
 ''Yes; in colorature cooking she S quite unexeelled.-Puek-
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
AN ExPATRIATED AMERICAN.
Life Led by William Waldorf Astor
 TdooI 0vra

Not an Ideal One.
 William Waldorf Astor. the expatri- ated American, who is now in France looking over some of its marketable
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
A Definition.

'I always manage to get the lead away and bore them."-Puck
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Cayuse Made Good.

Pepperhole Pete-Cayuse Charley is gone at last; he tried ter throw the through express off tn track an wuz cut in two.
 Lariat Luke-Waal, Cayuse made good; he allus sed he'd never die with his boots on.-Ohio State Journal.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

Pettyville Postmaster-Nope! Drummer-Good! The firm hasn't fired me yet!-Puck.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
The Only Way.

Flores can't bore me-" "Why not?"
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
Cause for Characterization.

Drummer-Any mail for me-John H. Klawback?
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27

New brooms sweep clean-and old ones. too. if properly manipulated
The St. Johns herald., 1901-07-27
A Shnrt Cnt to Iernfr-

Fly-PoOr little things. NoChi1s seems to grow up in this desert