The Wichita daily eagle., 1901-06-04
REPARrgE OF THE woRpsYs.

REPARTEE OF The WORDSYS.
Il bought a hat today. John" said Mrs
Worldly. settling herself comfortably IL
the rocker.
"A hat, my dear?" replied her hus-
band, frowning at the house dog,
Yes, my love, hat; and very pretty
one, I think"
Very pretty. no doubt, but"
But what. my lover
But do you think you needed a new
hst?"
"Ah, It is always so with you men: if
wives waited for their husbands 20 sug-
gest buying something they never would
have anything" And Mrs. Worldly
smoothed out her dress with an injured
air.
Yes. no doubt we are all brutes-''
''Brutes, my dear7 Why, I never said
that"
"No. but"
But what. John? I see you are fall
ing into the habit OF not concluding your
sentences
It's because you don't give me a
chance, my dear" replied her husband.
meekly.
All, yes. OF course. 7 always am to
blame for everything. I"
Il didn't say that; / simply
NO, but you meant it. You are always
insinuating that I cause all the trouble.
Since you think that, why did you ever
marry me?''
'T-er-rr-welI. the fact is. it was diff
ferent then"
so it was different, eh7 suppose you
are sorry now that you did. and
But I didn't say that, my love.
thought we were talking about a hat"
"Seel You are trying 10 avoid answer
ing. do say it now; you men are
brutes."
why. what an angelic temper you dis
play. Cecilia You surely don't mean
that"
Yes, I do. You all talk sweetly to US
until we marry you, and then find fault
because We haven't wings
I'm sure I never expected such a
thing. In fact, I always thought you we're
a model woman"
That's all very pretty, but refuse TO
be taken in by your candied talk. I
know what you think
Better than I do, my dear?" asked
Mr.. Worldly, administering a well-direct-
ed kick 10 the dog. which had incautiOus-
" approached within reach OF his foot.
Yes, better than you do, she replied,
breaking into tears. You are q mean,
spiteful thing to abuse me So"
Il abuse you? Well, that's good onei
We We're just talking about hat when
you commenced"
me again. 1t is so manly of you to put
everything off on your poor wife. But 1t 8
just like men,
The poor men again. Next you viii
tell me we are all cannibals and eat up
our wives as a pastime.'
Sir. your levity is ill-timedl You tor
ment me until I cry and then mock
me-"
We'll, it's just this way, my dear" re-
sponded her husband, getting Up and
pacing rapidly back and forth. You
started by telling me you had bought a
hat, and
rs there anything wrong about my
buying a hat? I'm sure I can't 60 in
rags
you said we men were brutes-"
Il didn't say so; you said it your
self"
MY dear, I never"
yes. you did. know you did"
But, my love. am certain you said
So"
II did not"
''well, let it go. At an events, you said
I abused YOU
And so you do. You blame me for
everything, even when I buy hat"
"Oh, plague take the hatl I don't care
how many hats you buy, but"
There, that but againl You see you
do care, and you know it."
Woman, u
Mice epithet. Mr.. Worldly. You forget
I am your wife"
"Confound it, You never let me finish.
I was going to remark"
THAT 1 didn't need new hat, Ell?
Precious little you care how I look and
what the neighbors say. I have some
pride sir, if you have none"
But if you would only let me conclude
you would see 1 wasn't referring to that
at ALL
''weu?"
''well what was talking about?"
"A hat, my love"
ooh, let's bury the hat. I said I didn't
care about the hat, but I don't like to
have you say that 1 abuse you"
But didn't you address me as 'wo-
man% Goodness only knows what adjec-
tive you put in front OF it-mentally."
1T was because became a little ex-
cited"
"A little excited? A very mild term.
Mr. Worldly. You were blue in the face.
Your temper needs restraint, my dear"
"Of course, my temper is diabohcal,
while yours is sweetness itself"
II hatter myself that can control IL
pretty we'll" replied Mrs. Worldly with
assurance. You could. too. if you would
only try. The idea of getting angry about
a hat. Fie on you,"
1T was not the hat, tell you; it was
about"
Now, commence your tirads again. my
love"
NO. I won't commence my TRADE, as
you call #: but I would request you IN
the future to not mention the fact If you
happen to buy new hat
a hat, my dear2
Yes, a hat-"-W. Evans Barnes"