davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1901-04-19

Sheriff of ROCK Co.
by L. W. LANGwORTHY.
Deputy Sheriff.
The Wisconsin tobacco reporter. (Edgerton, Wis.) 1877-1950, 1901-04-19
Talk of q Referendum.

The enemies Of the bill were will
ing to send even the full Stevens bill
to the state to be voted upon at a
referendum. Perhaps the friends of
the measure could now get that legis-
lative act if they wish it. Certainly
they are very confident that the peo-
pie would approve the bill at the polls.
The other side does not think so, how
ever. Public, sentiment is becoming
informed and no one can tell what
might be the verdict after the state
had discussed the matter a few
months longer
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
THE TIME 70 LAUGH.
SOME GOOD JOKES. ORIGINAL AND
:, SELECTED.
Sweeney Couldn't Get ON but His Fell
low Player, Policeman. Saved the
Day by Strategem-On q Country
Rnad-why Auntie. Departed.

The Roxborough (Pa.). Athletic as
ISOLATION boasts an amateur baseball
club that is the pride of the commu-
nifty. During the late season some
very exciting games were won, nrinci-
pally through the heavy batting of ons
Sweeney. Now, Sweeney had job
that occasionally kept him at work on
Saturday afternoon, and on these oc-
casle.ns his absence was keenly felt.
Anorher member of the team, named
Mcdonald, is a policeman. One Sat-
urday Sweeney announced that 1t
would be impossible for him to play
that afternoon-that all his pleading
with his employer had been in vain.
1t was a very important game, and all
sorts of things were suggested to in
sure the presence of Sweeney, but all
were abandoned as being impractical
BILE. Finally Policeman Mcdonald
came to the rescue.
''I'll arrest him," said the minion Of
the law. The plan was hailed
with loud acclaim, and Mcdonald at
once put on his uniform. Then he
sailed out, armed with fake war
rant, and found Sweeney ard at work.
Sweeney" he said, Il have war
rant for your arrest. l would advise
you to come quietly and make no fuss
about it,
Pretending to be greatly alarmed.
the captive put on his hat and coat
and went along with the policeman
That afternoon Sweeney played the
game of his life and won the day by
knocking a h--ne run with three men
on bases. But he has another job
now.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
HOIST WITH HIS OWN PErARp.

Professor Trent of Columbia Univer-
sity in "a Retrospect of American
Humor," in the November Century.
tells the following anecdote in con-
nection with an account of Judge
Longstreet's book called Georgia
Scenes:
Unless he was mystifying his read
ers, one of the best scenes in his book
was not from Judge Longstreet's hand
that admirable description Of the
militia company drill which Mr.. Tho
mas Hardy seems to have made free
with in the twenty-third chapter Of
1.-The Trumpet Major" Almost as
amusing as the apparently plundereo
sketch is the fact that when the lift
ing" was exposed by the Critic" in
parallel columns, writer in the Daily
News'-was it Mr.. Andrew Lang?-
came to the rescue of the British nov
elist by pointing out how far the latter
had improved upon the crude sketch
of the American provincial. But alas
no sooner had this convincing proof of
British superiority been given than the
Critic" was forced to explain that by
an unlucky (sic) mistake the authors
names at the tops of the columns had
been transposed!
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
vICTORIA'S COURTESY.
She Defied Race Prejudice and Received n
COlOred Woman.

She Defied Race Prejudice and Received n
COlOred Woman.
Queen Victoria, when she received at
Windsor the bishops and delegates to
the great convention of the Episcopal
church held in London year or two
before her death, accorded just the
same amount of distinguished consid-
Grafton to the negro race as to their
white English and American fellow
prelates. When some five years ago
the queen heard of the arrival in Lon
don of an old colored nanny from the
free state of Liberia, who had saved
up her money shilling by shilling for
the purpose of going to England to
see her majesty, she not only asked
her to visit her at Windsor castle, but
even invited her to take seat on the
sofa beside her during the interview.
The late queen was accustomed to
keep even the greatest statesmen and
grandest ladies' in the land standing
IN her presence.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
HE WAS AMBUsHED.

when does the next train that stops
at Montrose leave here?" asked the
resolute widow at the booking Office
window.
You'll have to wait five hours
ma'am."
Il don't think so.'
We'll, perhaps you know better than
/ do
"Yes, sir! And perhaps you know
better than l do whether am expect
ing to travel by that train myself, or
whether l am inquiring for relative
that's visiting at my house. And may
be you think it's your business to stand
behind there and try to instruct peo-
pie about things they know as well as
you do, If not better! And perhaps
you'll learn some day to give people
civil answers when they ask you civil
questions. young man; but my opinion
is you WON'T"
"Yes. ma'am" gasped the booking
clerk.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
Traveller. to California

Naturally desire to see the grandest
and most impressive scenery en- route.
This you will do by selecting the Den
yer & Rio Grande and Rio Grande
Western, 1.-The Scenic Line of the
Wor5d," and "The Great Salt Lake
Route in one or both directions, as
this line has two separate routes across
the Rocky mountains between Denver
and Ogden. Tickets reading via this
route are available either via its main
line through the Royal Gorge, Lead
vile, over Tennessee pass, through the
Canon of the Grand river and Glen
wood Springs, or via the line over
Marshall Pass and through the Black
Canon of the Gunnison. thus enabling
the traveller to use one of the above
routes going and the other returning.
Three splendidly equipped fast trains
are operated to and from the Pacific
coast, which carry through standard
sleepers daily between Chicago, st.
Louis, Denver and San Francisco. Din
ing cars (service In carte) on all
through trains. If you contemplate
such a trip, let us send you beautifully
illustrated pamphlets, free. S. X.
Hooper, G. P. & L. A., Denver, Colo.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
400 Reward s1oo.

The readers OF this paper will be pleased to
learn that there Is Mt least one dreaded disease
that science has been able to cure in all its
stages, and that Is Catarrh. Halls Catarrh
Cure is the only positive cure now known to the
medical fraternity. Catarrh being q constitu-
tional disease, requires constitutional treat
ment. Halls Catarrh Cure is taken internally,
acting directly upon the blood and mucous sur
faces OF the system. thereby destroying the
foundation OF the disease, and giving the patient
assisting nature In doing its work The pro-
prietors have so much faith In its curative
powers that they offer One Hundred Dollars for
Testimonials
Address +. J. CHENEY s. CO., Toledo. O
Sold by druggists Toe.
Halls Family Pills are the best
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
COVER NEEDED.

"Gracious!" exclaimed her husband.
when she came down in her new de-
collette gown. you're not all dressed.
are ycr?"
Yes. replied Mrs. ! ocutte. Tex
ers for the corsage.'
MY dea-. the most modest bunch
Of flowers you could wear would b,
about 25 or 80 large ohrysanthe-
NUNS. PHIL delphia Press.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
rIfEsIpE CONVERSE.

81 nave great mind to go to the
political club tonight" said Mr.. j.
to his vile.
"What?" she replied. with surprise.
II have great mind to go to the
club tonight" .3 YeF
"Whose?" she asked.
Whose what?"
Whose great mind?" @".lo
why. my own, of course, madam" :"
"Oh!" and the rising infection she
gave the ejaculation was very provok-
ing to man of fine feeling.-Chicago
Journal.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
HUMOROUS NOTES.
Extensive Prize.

ExpCHSIVG IrIZes
Mrs. Gi;son-"What pretty lamp!"
Mrs. Wilson-"Yes. Mr.. Wilson won
that at a target shoot
Mrs. Gilson-"How lovely! And so
it didn't cost you anything"
Mrs. Wilson-"Oh. no, it didn't
cost us anything, But Mr.. Wilson
spent ABOUT SIS for rife and score
cards and ammunition."-So
Journal
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
EMBARRASSING SITUATION.

Mr.. Wat,syns-"That pretty Mrs.
Wilbur asked me to lend her money
for her carfare going IN town today.
Mr.. Wyllkyns-"Well, of course, you
were glad to have chance to oblise
her."
Mr.. Watkyns-"Oh, yes! but had
given all thu money l had to Mrs
Watkyns before left home and after
l had paid my own faro hadn't even
nickel in my pockets. ."-Somerville
Journal.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
The First Ironclad.

According to records recently discovered
the first ironclad was built In the six
teenth century. but as It proved unman-
ageable was soon abandoned. In the
present century people are trying this
medicine and that one in the hope OF find
Ing relief from ailments OF the stomach,
liver and bowels. There Is only one med
icine that will cure indigestion. dyspepsia,
hatulency. biliousness and malaria, fever
and ague and that IL Hostetter's Stomach
Bitters. Try 1t and you will be convinced.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
Hardest Task Of All.

An Engllshmnn is responsible for the
following sentiment:
'To write n book is an easy task; 1t
requires only pen and ink and some
patient paper. To print a book IL
slightly more difficult, because genius
often expresses itself in illegible manu-
script. To read n book Is still more
difficult us one must struggle against
sleep. But the most difficult task that
any one may attempt is to sell book" :"
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
Caring for Sick Soldiers.

Princess Louise of England has es-
tablished hospital at her own ex-
pense, at the Roseneath Inn, the beau
tiful little hostelry owned by the duke
on the GarelOch estate of the Argyll
family, where she is caring for inval-
ided soldiers from the front. Nearly
100 men have been in residence at one
time or another.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
HIa Admission,

II hear that you are engaged, Gold
thorp," said Steriingworth. rs it
time for congratulations?
We'll. l won't acknowledge that"
replied the happy young man, "but I'm
about to confer upon certain young
lady the right to select my neckties for
me."-Detroit Free Prcss.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
Entirely Literal.

Teachcr-How many of my scholars
can remember the longest sentence
they ever read?
Billy-Please. mum, / can.
Teacher-What? Is there only one?
Well, William. you can tell the rest
of the scholars the longest sentence
you ever read.
Billy-Imprisonment for life.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
Later.

Having used the word kick" in its
slang sense. little Clarence was
promptly taken to task by his mother
You shouldn't say that word" said
she.
That's true. mamma, ! shouldn't"
frankly responded the manly little fell
low. IT'S more up-to-date to say
knock'."-Detroit Free Press.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
SATISFIED.

Sister-Johnny. If you are such a
bad boy, you won't go to heaven.
Don't you want to go to heaven?
Johnny "a .-ears old)-No.
Why. you don't want to so to the
bad place, do you?"
No"
well. what do you want?"
Il want to live right hore."
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14

We promise that should you use PUT
NAM FADELESS DYES and be dissat-
isfed from any cause whatever, to re-
fund 10c. for every package.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
lrIsll Logic.

Bridget-Sure. Mr.. Landlord, you
charged me 25 cents week for gas in
the middle Of summer. but the Jays
are so much shorter nov I ought to be
getting II cheaper.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14

"well." remarked Mr.. Upiohn. who had
been reading of the doings In South AZ
rica; war is Just what General sherman
Mrs. Upiohn. severely. "have / asked you
not to use profane Language In the pres
ence OF the children?'
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
Ciear NJ Mud.

what time does the procession
take place. johnny"
well. II 1t rains in the morning II
will start in the afternoon. and II It
rains in the afternoon 1t will start in
the morning"
Priest-Good evening. Patsy; It's
fire moonlight tonight.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
No Particular. Needed.

Hicks-'I bought a horse yesterday"
Wicks-"Oh. well. don't feel bad
about 1t. People are always getting
stuck In horse trades. "-Somerville
Journal.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14

The wheelwright had not learned to
spell and declared that he never could
manage to write rite right.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
For LOYa.

He-"I understood she married him
for his money"
She-"No. It was for love"
He-"Love. indeed?"
She-"Of course. Love OF his mon
ey."-Detroit Free Press.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
Sldetrncked.

Clara-"Pa has been home a whole
week and he hasn't got to telling a
Il ing yet about the Pan-American."
Laura-"Why not?"
Clara-"oh. everything he began to
tell reminded ma or me of something
at the Chicago Worlds Fair"-Detroit
Free Press.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14

Piso's Cure is the best medicine We ever used
for all affections Of the throat and iunRs.-WA.
| O. ExpsLEY, vanburen. Ind. Feb. 10. 1900.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14

FITS permanently Cured. 40 iits afte
hrst days OF DIR. klin.'s Great Nerve Restorsr
eend for FREE S2.OO trial poitls and treatiss
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14

First Artist-Dauber does nothing but
potboilers nowadays. Second Artist
Yes; he believes in art for the stom-
ach'S sake
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14

Mrs. Gotham-Now they say Chicago Is
to have the most powerful telescope ever
made What do you suppose that Is for?
Mr. Gotham-I presume they want to find
out II the top stories of their houses are
Inhabited.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
GREAT.GNKNOWNIsLAND
BAFFINLANDI NEXT TO GREEN
ssa.- LAND IN. SIZE. s.

Vast Island In Northern British America
Has Been shown on the Map aa Many.
Islnnds-Contains Two Immense Lakes
Larger Than the State of Texas but
Composed Mostly of barren Rocks
Partly Covered With Ice.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14

The well posted druggist advises you
to use Wizard OIL for pain. for he
knows what It has done. 6
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
Stops tho Cough and
Works on the Cold
Laxative Bromo Quinine Tablets. Price 25c

in a cherryoot er fre? well. ef 'twu;
In July or Angus I'd favor u Refrigerator
wild wings"
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14

The question, what shall we do with
Aguinaldo?" has been solved. He has be-
come a magazine writer.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14

Farmer Medders-I wuz in New York
last Sunday. Squire Pompus-Ah! visited
the metropolis. eh? Farmer Medders--
Waal-er-no. didn't git round thar. l
don't reckon It'd be open on Sunday. any
how.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14

Brackett-They say you are financially
embarrassed. Do you owe u very large
amount? Crackett-I don't owe any
thing: but there are several people who
owe me. and haven't the courage to ask
for IL.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14

llrs. Winslow's Soothing syTur.
fcp chiidren teethng. softsns the gums, redue @ II
nAmmasoo. alays palm. curss wind colio 10 oostis
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14

~ Poor Hoppsr is stiii loo: ,oos!ns & 70, work, 70
W steady Job At last. -
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14

win the Housemaids' Union boycott
unfair mistresses-or will u girlcott
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
HIS ONE CHANCE.

Goodness! do hope our young
minister won't tmarry that Miss Strong
mind"
81 didn" think you took so much in
terest in him as to care very much"
'Im not thinking Of myself. that's
all. II he marries her he'll never have
a chance to ak except from the pull
pit ard then we'll uffer."-Philadel-
phia Press.
Gilpin observer., 1901-11-14
ON A COUNTRY ROAD.

Farmer A. of Mountainviile: How
much did you get for yer taters:
Farmer B. of Port Jervis: Wahl !
didn't get as much as I expected and
didn't expect would.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1901-07-05

conceive of any plan that would support
them more cheaply.
1t will be noticed that the cost of main
tsnance OF the permanent poor, of both
total and partial support is less than half
the whole expense, while the ''doctor''
bills are within SOL of being as large as
the total paid for the support Of the per-
manent poor of the totally maintaine d
class.
A great part of the temporary aid is
given to transients, and to these is also a
large portion of the doctors bills
chargeable. There is always large
number of laborers at work among the
farmers of the county, which in the har-
vest and threshing season is augmented
to thousands, and if one of them gets
sick or hurt by accident, he usually be-
comes county charge, and often by
bills for nursing, physician, medicine,
hospital and sometimes surgical opera
ton, he becomes a very expensive,
though but temporary pauper.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1901-07-05
NOTES OF CLASSIFICATION.

NOTES OF CLASSIFICATION.
Permanent poor are those which re-
ceive county help continuously.
Ofthe permanent poor there are two
classes: 1st, those totally disabled and
who are fully maintained by the county;
and End, those partially able to support
themselves but who receive some assis-
tance regularly from the county.
Temporary poor are those who in the
winter months, or temporarily disabled
by sickness, accident, etc., require and
receive county assistance for time.
Doctor, medicine and hospital expen-
ses include surgical operations, nursing,
Keely cure, etc.
Transportation expenses include all
carriage fees for necessary or desirable
transportation Of the poor.
Funeral expenses include coffin, dig
ging graves burying, etc.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1901-07-05
THE REPORT on POOR EXPENSE.

THE REPORT on POOR EXPENSE.
We print in this issue the report Of the
county commissioners on the expense Of
keeping the poor Of the county.
We think the figures given will be oi
much value to the taxpayers, as most Of
them seem to have rather hazy ideas as
to the actual cost.
The total amount Is little less than
$1,000. This IS quite . sum Of money !,
but after all. i only represents the cost
Of the permanent and total maintenance
of 60 to 10 individuals out Of ! popula-
don Of 1900 people, at 300 each per
gear. most Of whom are sick and ailinr,
and for whom large bills are paid fof
maedicine and doctoring: or course
there are more individuals on the roll.
but e many are temporarily 81 but
partially supp ported. that Is What Il
amounts 70. and the 60 Of 20 individuals
e small proportion comparatively d
n,nnber and 'ths el00 each chsap rate
3or support ana II would be dif6cult Is
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1901-07-05

SCORES.
The following is summary of the
scores made:
1234567 7s91O11 10 13 AS 16 II 1s 10
Larimore222OOOOOOO 100000
Cavalier. r.O010040O1O 100000 600
Totals {-S
Rsezten:: RseSs.' g 9 s5 g ] 30 90
SPORTS.
Running jump-Wallace 1st, Duff End.
ndingjump-Wallace 1st, Miller End
Hop, step and jump-Wallace 1st,
Cowan End.
High jump-Wallace 1st, Dure End.
Putting shot,. Rogers.
RACES.
100 yds-C. Moore 1st, F. Cowan End,
]. VanWhort 3rd.
12O yds hurdles. Duff 1st, G. Cos
law End, F. Cowan 3rd.
220 yds hurdle-C. Moore 1st, F.
Cowan End, G.. Goslaw Bird.
so yds sack E. Marion 1st, ]. McCaul
End.
Boys-D. Brill 1st, Ed. Smith End, F.
Goslaw 3rd.
TRAP SHOOTING.
10 birds -Cavileer 1st, Mcclellan and
Lapp End, McLarin and Phinn 3rd.
Is birds-cavileer 1st, Handy End,
McLarin and Lapp 3rd.
5 doubles -Cavileer 1st, Lapp End,
Dick 3rd. Handy and Phin 4th.
15,birds- -Cavileer 1st McKellar and
Handy End.
25 birds cavileer 1st, Handy End,
Lapp and Phin 3rd.
Is birds Cavileer and Phin 1st Craw-
ford End, Evans 3rd.
25 birds-C Cavileer 1st Lapp, Phin and
Handy End, Crawford 3rd, Evans 4th.
TENNIS.
Teams -Musselman and Robbie, Cava-
lier; Dowker and Aime, Emerson
O'Brien and Mortlock, Dominion City;
Godward and Carr, Pembina.
Ofthese Pembina and Cavalier qualified
for finals in which Cavalier won.
In the singles O'Brien, Musselman,
Robbie, Mortlock. Godward, Dowker
and Hood (of Drayton) entered. Nus
selman and Dowker qualified for finals, |
which were not finished, owing to dark
ness.
The boys tennis was only played in
part owing 70 lack Of time, and the games
will be finished at some future date.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1901-07-05
The Pioneer Express.
FARMING IN ENGLAND.

A relative of Editor De la Bere, of the
Sheldon Progress, who formerly lived
in North Dakota and who has returned
to England, writes back an interesting
letter, in which he gives the following
glimpses of the English styles of farming:
"You don't seem to be having any too
much moisture again this summer, but
there are others. We have had no rain
worth mentioning for the last six weeks.
Late sown oats and barley are not up
yet. The silly fools still sow by hand
and consequently the seed lies on top of
the ground, when they would got lots of
moisture if seeded with drill.
The hay crop is almost failure; very
few fields in this neigborhood will go
more than half a ton to the acre. l have
not got any worth cutting. have got a
very fair garden by dint of watering
every evening.
It would make you smile to see the
Sussex up-to-date way of farming. One
day / saw four men plowing with three
norSeS, man to horse and one to the
plow. This was on Colonel st. Johns
farm-my landlord man who owns
some 1900 acres Of land. A few days
ago ! saw six men getting in one load Of
hay and the man on the load loading
with his hands. No wonder England is
behind the times if all kinds of business
IS carried on In the same way as farming.
The colonel allows me to pop over a
rabbit when ! want one. As they are
thick as 1eas on dogs back shall get
some sport. He also preserves any
amount Of pheasants.
] added to my farm stock yesterday by
purchasing young PIC. It seems very
odd farming ~ on such small scale,
u I . y /. L
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1901-07-05
Educational.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

The first effort I made as an ad-
ministrative officer to advance the school
interests of Pembina county was the
preparation of some suggestions which
were subsequently embodied in bill
known as Senate Bill No. "a, and which
bill became law, operative July l, 1901.
|, This law provides for the assembling
OF the presidents of all school boards for
the consideration of educational matters;
and, to make it effective, compensation
is allowed for attendance at each meet
ing. While this compensation is not
large (not exceeding in any case five
dollars) it is sufficient to prevent actual
pecuniary loss to those whose time is
valuable, and who can not conveniently
suffer any financial loss. The first con.
vention of directors under this new law
will be held in Bathgate, July 13, at 1890
am.
The first meeting will be for most part
preliminary. There will be program,
consisting of one or two papers, and
probably as many discussions. 1t is
highly desirable that this meeting be
near high-Water mark so as to lend i'm
petus to subsequent conventions. 1t
will be exceedingly gratifying to this de-
partment if all the presidents OF school
boards were to attend. If you will par
don the apparent vanity and egotlsm,
this is my s'pet measure" and l shall be
sorely disappointed if great good does
not eventually result to our schools from
this and similar meetings.
Consolidation of Schools, Township
High Schools, Free Text Books, Uni
formity of Text Books for the county,
and Improvement of School Grounds,
are few of the educational problems
now confronting the educational forces
OF the state; and we in Pembina county,
can not, without displaying lack of due
civic pride, shirk our share of the
responsibility.
1t will take time to bring about many
needed reforms; but we must have an
intelligent conception of the necessity of
reform, before it can be realized.
No one has higher regard than the
writer for the intelligence of the average
director of Pembina county. But the
most energetic intelligence as unit is
powerless.
There must be organization and num-
bers to secure any desirable public
measure. / shall spare neither time nor
effort to make this initial meeting sue
cessful and profitable.
While. this meeting is called for the
presidents of school boards, all directors
are urged to be present. My confidence
in the intelligent action of our school
officers is so great that I venture to pre-
dict the realization of some substantial.
practical educational advance as result
of our first meeting.
W.. ALEXANDER,
Co. Supt. of Schools.
Pembina, June 26. 1901.