Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1901-09-23
IQUEER EXPERIENCES
Met by the Yankee in TRAVELLING
Through the Provinces,
Country Described as Seen Through a
Pair Of Down East SpectocIes.
Everything Is Surprisingly Twisted. The Street
Car Conductor Set Forth.

| der, II there is any fun in his p,oL.o,,n
sees many things that borders on tn.
ludicrous, for they do things so differ
| entity from what the Yankee docs ove,
here in the states. The traveller in
arising in the morning. if he should
cnance to take morning walk before
| breakfast. is pretty sure to collide with
about everything he meets and ahout
| the time he begins to think like the
drunken man that everybody else is
under the influence of the 'roseN" il
occurs to him that the old homcly mot
| to to keep to the right does not apply
| to the Provinces for they Invariably
| turn to the left as the King directs.
and that is what causes the mix-up.
! But the true Provincial is very cour-
teous and if he has time lodges You
and averts a collision. If this is una
voidable he raises his hat and saws:
Pardon. Monsieur" and passes along.
If one makes "A purchase in any of
TIE stores he is pretty sure to receive in
change load of Canadian pennies and
| a Canadian penny is about the size and
| shape of Il baby's pewter plate and one
invariably looks to see if the alpha bet
is stamped around its rim and a man
with % cents in Canadian pennies in
his pocket is a good deal like a bronze
statue" He is pretty sure to become a
fixture in the Provinces.
AT the hotel if one is roomng on the
the roof or near enough to hear the
angels sing. and having that tired Il e.
ing, and not wishing to climb several
flights Of stairs. inquiries for the ele-
Vator, he learns that there are no ele-
vators in the Provinces. They are
lifts. This is English. quite Engi H.
you know" and the down East Yankee
who makes this bad break feels his
minutcness for some time.
Another thing that seems odd to the
man from the states is the newsboy.
or neWSgirl, rather For newspapers
arc sold on the streets and at dep ITS
mostly by girls who fire the news at
you in four or five different languages
with . rapidity that would put a Max
i'm gun TO shame and ii is So comfort
ing, while waiting for your breakfast
to be served, TO open up the morning
paper which you have purchased on
your morning ramble and find the petit
lady who runs the travelling news bu
Tcau has taken your exact measure,
length. breadth and thickness ANA has
sold YOU 4 French or Dutch paper.
And you have splendid time looking
at the picture Of the hcarse upon en-"
page and the picture of watery eyed
maiden on the other whose face looks
as if it had been struck by a shifting
engine when she was young and il had
never returned to its normal condition
Some words in Gum Arabic or Hebrew
1xrrt l.aTr .
able TO deciphcr them one is left in
doubt whether thi; is the picture OF the
willing bride or one OF the crowned
heads of Europe or an advertisement
~, q moth and freckle lotion. Not
Wishing to let the waiter discover tAat
.our carly education in the Dutch ana
Hebrew languages had been neglected,
YOU pretend to be deeply Interested IN
the news and smile and laugh AT the
pretsel jokes You notice the waiter
looks little strange and just before
leaving the table you discover the Joke.
Ycu are lit" Your scattering OF the
Ianguages enables you to make out
that YOU have been reading the 40
Of mage and transfers of Real rs
tate" column. You bride the waiter IN
t. silence and pass out
There is ore piece OF Oncle sam
money the Canadians have no ea'thll
rco for and that is the nickel 1-cch'
,,i.,c Even the missionaries won take
II and ANYTHING the missionaries won
ta1,a must be pretty hard coin ana
when YOU hand one out in change 10
PROVINCIAL YOU can't tell BY the express
s;op on his face whether he is going t.
~ ~. hit Won He evidently thinks
ha,,or Of il and thinking it may be an
heirloom i'll the family. passes IL pa'N
ia YOU. ON the electric cars one may
IL. rolling in nickeis. in fact nave
o,rb 70 throw to the birds, but I'M
,ess some good Samaritan comes 70 lhe
roecua with an English 5-cent piece "l
| the fish scale variety the nlchei Nh
,;ar,ire must walk The electric cars
have the most unique way o. cOlico'.''-
ra,.as on the continent. After getting
4, the electrics the conductor 'oii'eo
along with square leather poA 49,
,,.es sides He clutches 1t by the h,'ii-
| d,a and presents it for your lnspectlon.
| II i. a cross between a bapy houaN
1 q Paul Revere tankard. There IS
! ~ onaning in the top just large enough
| ~ = silver o-cent piece to drop IN. II
IA ;s fortunate enough to nave On :
he drops it in the box and the ma
ci,l transaction is closed. III not MS
tro,,bla commences. He is Obliged 70
and come piece of silver the conduct
or vii, accept, purchases ticket OF
~ man of many fares and put the
! ,;cxet in the box. which is no TOOL OF q
| ioh as a ticket is like tissue paper ~
the time the transaction is cloSeo you
are way beyond the place whcre you
want to stop. possibly out IN inc SUD
,,rhs and you have to so through the
80 nrocees to get back again. In the
onirion of the writer this unique meth-
| "a docs more to offset the gcod work
aa,o nv the churches than anything IN
c.n,da for a man who can go through
This IS financial transaction to pay D.
annt fare without thinking of that
warm place where coal IS a urus On
Tho market and sulphur is as Tree as
~ is deserving Of harp with thou-
s.,,d strings inlaid with mother-ot-
naor, and an automatic attachment
tha+ nl,vs the harp without hands and
,,.bara they can sit back and SIP am
brosia When il was suggested ny the
oa,,arctor that it would help matters
| 49, , hole in the top he smiled and