Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1901-03-27
RlMT5 FOR JOURNALISTS.
A Sarcastic Handbook of Standard Re
portorial Phrases.

some years felt, in his own experience.
theeneed of handbook for standard
reportorial phrases has undertaken the
compilation of a work OF that charac-
ter The writer hereof was recently
permitted to glance through number
of proof pages of this work, which
will undoubtedly prove of inestimable
value, if not absolutely Indispensable.
in the teaching of the science of jour-
nalsm, in so far as that science ap-
pertains to local or reportorial work.
In order to impress the standard
phrases upon the students mind the
compiler of the book has arranged the
material in the form of questions and
answers. The excellence of this ar
rangement will be shown by few of
the questions and answers taken lt
random from the proof pages:
q. Where does the famous man or
woman in ne 1 of rest generally go?
A, Far from the madding crowd.
Q. What ceremony inevitably pre-
cedes the interment of the well-known
) citizen?
A. The ,cst sad rites.
Q. By whom is the departed citizen
invariably mourned?
A. By a wide circle of sorrowing
friends.
Q. What notable discovery has the
well-matured diva or actress always
succeeded in making before the open
ing of each season?
A The fountain of perpetual youth.
O. What pitiable noises always fol-
low a serious railroad disaster?
A. The shrieks of the wounded and
dying.
O. What does the doomed man al
ways do on the morning he is to hang?
a. He chats with tile death-watch
and partakes of a hearty breakfast of
ham and eggs.
Q. Who always says that the last
big snow storm is the worst in his rec
election?
A. The oldest inhabitant.
Q. What always happens when big
afrerdark fire is on?
A. The lurid flames shoot into the
night sky.
q BY what are the burning corr
ices of the doomed building licked?
A. Tongues of flame.
Q. What does the captured embez.
zler sometimes do?
a. lie makes clean breast of his
speculations. which he admits have
been going on for years.
O. How would you describe any
debutante?
\. AS being beautiful and vivacious.
Q. A bride?
\. Blushingly beautiful.
@. A divorcee?
\. Fascinatingly beautiful
Q. How does the adventures always
win her victims?
\. She twists them around her little
finger.
Q. What always happens TO vic
tim of a powder magazine explosion?
a. He is hurled through the air
distance of 100 feet and blown into an
unrecognizable mass.
q. What does the hero who stops
the runaway team generally do?
4. He refuses to give his name and
disappears in the crowd.
Q. What is the registering son Of the
wealthy man usually called?
A. The wayward scion of distin-
guished family
Q. When you are a trifle doubtful as
to your facts, how do you introduce
your story?
\. BY saying that it is stated upon
the highest authority
Q. If you wanted to interview your.
self on the financial situation, what
authority would you give?
\. An eminent figure in the world
of finance, who, for obvious reasons,
desired that his name be withheld.
O. What is the years initial fall Of
snow?
A. The first furry of the season.
@. How would you allude to wiped.
out polar expedition:
y. More victims of the frozen ncr.h.
@ How would you intimate that au
exalted couple We're about to separate?
a. 1t is whispered about that
scandal in high life is brewing.
Q. What does the young mother,
finding herself and her child in peril,
always do?
A She frenziedly clasps her babe In
her embrace.
O. Is there such thing as baby
in these descriptions?
~ No; only babes.
Q. In what state does the eldest IN
habitant usually go hence?
\. Full of years and honors.
@. What happens to the hero of tile
/ football game?
a. He is carried off the field on the
shoulders Of his enthusiastic friends
These, as stated above, are only
\ few quotations taken at random, but
lrnough are given to indicate of what
NncalculGble value the book will be 10
Journalism Washington Star.
"As Mad Halter"
hnIA hO Foo