davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
As She Described II.

IT was the first day Of school. The
bell had tapped, and the little children
of the secondary primary were sitting
upright in their seats, hands properly
folded and with round eyes fixed on
the new teacher, taking a mental in
ventory.
She was n bit nervous. 1t was her
first school. The children made her
'fidgety," they stared at her SO hard
and watched her so narrowly.
She began to feel like a mouse that
is within the clutches of a cat. She
cast about wildly in her mind for some
occupation to begin the first day. She
regretted bitterly that she had not ar
ranged some definite plan of campaign.
Then her face frightened. She would
find out what the children already
knew. Question followed question,
touching on divers subjects.
"Now, who knows what a skeleton
is?" asked the teacher, smiling coax
ingly.
The little girl wearing the pink ging-
ham apron and occupying the back
seat waved her hand wildly and work
ed her mouth in frantic endeavor to get
teacher to look at her.
"Well. what is it,"
"a skeleton" said the tot, twisting
her apron in her fingers, 'is a man
who has his insides outside and his
outsides off."-Denver Times.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
A Faithful Dog.

Many hundred years ago there lived
at Athens a dog whose faithfulness
has caused him to be mentioned in
history, and in the Grecian city his
story is often repeated.
The dog guarded one Of the heather
temples at Athens. One night a thief
stole into this building and carried off
some of the most valuable treasures.
The dog vainly barked his loudest to
frighten the thief and to rouse the
keepers as the man went off with the
jewels. But the faithful dog did not
all through the night he followed him.
By daybreak the poor animal had be-
come very weary, but still he kept the
robber in sight. The latter tried to
feed MIN, and as he made friends with
the passersby he took 1t from them in
stead. Whenever the thief stopped to
rest the dog remained near him, and
soon q report went through the coun-
try of the animals strange behavior.
The keepers of the temple. hearing
the story, went in search of the dog,
and they found him still at the heels
of the thief at town called Cronyon.
The rObber was arrested, taken back
to Athens and there punished. The
judges were so pleased with the dogs
sagacity and faithfulness that they or
dered him to be fed every day for the
rest Of his life at the public expense.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
Each Great In His Own Way.

They tell a story about John Sher-
man and Bob Fitzsimmons, the prize
fighter. During his triumphal tour aft
er he had downed Corbett the great
gladiator was In Washington and
called at the state department. Then
was seen a contest between brain and
Drawn, head and hands. Fitzsimmons
looked sheepish and Ill at ease, but Mr..
Sherman evidently tried to make him
feel at home.
"Your recent contest was a severe
one, / believe. Mr.. FitzsimmonsT he
said.
Mr.. Fitzsimmons uttered a couple Of
inaudible words and grinned.
EFT seemed to have pretty thorough
ly aroused the country, the contest
did 1t notT'
Mr.. Fitxsimmons scrutinized the
brim Of his hat attentively, blushed,
grinned and said:
The United States Is fine country,
your honor" and backed out Of the
Office. responding with short. sharp
ducks of the head to the secretary Of
states farewell bows. When the doors
lad closed upon the then worlds cham
pion, the wrinkles at the sides of Mr..
Sherman's eyes contracted into a
smile.
"a great man that, Babcock," he
said dryly to his secretary. and went
IN with his work.-Cinclnnati CONNER
,ial Tribune
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
SnnnnlPS Free.
The Money In His Pocket.

A young Pittsburger arose from his
bed one morning and, dressing went
down stairs to breakfast. As he sat at
the table be carelessly put his right
hand into his trousers pocket and was
prJed to find $72j. He knew that
when he retired for the night he had
Just % cents and had fallen asleep
while wondering where he could bor-
row money the next morning. He was
highly ciatcd over the discovery, for,
although he thought long and hard
he could not remember how he bad
come into the possession of the money.
After work that day lie took n friend
to the opera ana later TO supper When
he returned home about midnight a
brother stepped iGto his room and said
Harry, did YOU pay that bill for me
today"
The young man was almost dunn
founded. 1t all came to him at once
Shortly after he had retired the pre-
vious night his brother had entered the
room and, placing the money in his
trousers pocket, said: Say, old man,
when you 90 down town tomorrow.
wish you would pay Mr.. - that bill
owe him. promised to let him have
it by tomorrow"
The young man was doing at the
time. and that accounts for his failure
to remember what his brother had said
to him. He was kept busy borrowing
from friends to make m the amount
the next day, and he declares that
hereafter his brother will have to pay
his own bills.-Pittsburg Chronicle.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
SwindIe by Pawn Tickets.

The most lucrative game which New
York swindlers work on the credulous
and eager New Workers themselves
continues to be the bogus or false
pawn ticket Swindle. 1t is not un-
known in Chicago, and 1t has so many
fine points about it, all of them ap-
pealing to the man who loves to make
q few dollars on the side, that the
rogues who work it are never out Of
customers. The simplest method is for
the swindler to tell his intended vic
tim he has in pawn ring or gem worth
500. He claims to have pawned it for
only $50, and rather than lose the
difference between the real value and
the amount for which he pawned it he
will give the customer a rare bargain.
There Is $25 due the pawnbroker, be-
sides s. interest, leaving an equity Of
$40. He will sell that equity for just
half, or $50. After the victim has paid
over the $50 and has redeemed the
pledge he finds that the real value Of
the article is $50 to $50 and that he is
out So to SO. The pawnbroker gets all
he loaned, and the original owner
makes all the victim overpaid.-Chica-
60 Tribune.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
He Didn't Write the story.

A correspondent Of the Philadelphia
Press says that when the late Il. Il. a.
Dorr was on the staff of the Baltimore
American news came one day to the
city editor that food in the Seven Foot
Knoll lighthouse, out in Chesapeake
bay, was exhausted and that the keep
er and his family were starving. Dorr
secured custom house tug and loaded
it with provisions. The weather was
exceptionally cold, and the tug was
stuck in the ice half q mile from the
knoll Dorr left the boat and started
over the ice.
When he reached the lighthouse, he
was warmly greeted. Come in the
dining room," said the keepers wife
after the rescuer had warmed himself.
"Come In and have dinner with US"
Mr.. Dorr thought that hunger had
made her mad. II heard that you
soon as he could speak.
"Well, come to think of it," replied
the housewife, 1--WE do. We have plen-
ty of meat and vegetables, -four and
that sort, but the next time you are
coming out this way we'd appreciate it
If you'd bring over few jars of ounce
JAM" she added cheerfully.
Mr.. Dorr took his provisions back to
Baltimore, but no account of his trip
was written.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
Sure Enough Tale.

In one Of the private schools here in
town there is small boy who is al
ways cheerfully miles be lind every
body else. He Is not n dull boy, but
learning Goes not appeal to him as be-
Ing thing especially to be desired.
Recently the teacher told the class in
composition that on the next day she
would expect each of them to be able
to write a short anecdote. She eX-
planned with great care the meaning OF
the word anecdote, and next day when
she called the class up to write all but
the laggard went at once to work
'Why don't you write an anecdote,
Rob?" asked the teacher.
Il forget what an anecdOte is" said
Rob, undisturbed.
Il explained to you yesterday, Rob,
and you ought to remember" said the
teacher, a bit out of patience. "An
anecdote is a tale. Now write"
Rob bent over his slate and. with
much twisting of brow and writhing
of lip ground out his task. When the
states We're collected, his was at the
very top of the heap. The teacher
picked it up, and this is what she read:
Yesterday we had soup made from
the anecdote of an ox.''-Youths Com
paniOn.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
The Graye OF Arnic Laurie,

1t has just been discovered that the
grave of Annie Laurie, the heroine of the
world famous ballad. has rema.Hcd for
all these years without a tombstone.
Many people are under the delusi0n that
Annie Laurie was merely a fg.a,ut Of
the poets brain. Bet this was al 50.
She was the daughter Of Sir Robert
Laurie and was born in M&EWC.ton
House, which stands on the 'bl..es' i'm
mortalized in the song. Her birth is
thus set down in the Barjorg manu-
script: AT the pleasure OF the Almighty
God, my daughter, Anna Laurie, was
born upon the 10Th day of December,
1882 about O'Clock in the moraing, and
was baptized by Mr. George. minister Of
Glencairn." NaXw,lton House is still
full of memories of this winsome girl,
and in the long drawing room there still
hangs her portrait Her lover and the
author of the original song was young
Douglas of England but whether he, as
is common with lovers of poetic tempera-
ment, cid not not press his suit sufficient
ly or whether she wished a stabler hus-
band, she gave her hand to a prosaic
country laird, her cousin, Mr.. Alexander
Ferguson. They lived the reSt of their
lives at Craigdarroch House, five miles
from Maxwelton, and when she died
Annie was buried in the beautiful glen
of the Cairn. Lady Scott SpOttiswoode,
who died early in the present year, was
responsible for the modern version of the
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10

"Of all the excuses | have ever heard
from people for not paying their bills, u
said q collector for prominent firm
the other day, 81 got the neatest today
from a very wealthy man who always
owes the house a bill No matter
whether the bill is for SO or 500, he
always pays So. | have gone back the
next week and got S. more, and once
went back twice in one week, and he
paid me So each time and seemed glad
to see me. l got to know him pretty
we'll, and the other day | asked him
why he did not pay it all, as knew he
had the money"
well said the old fellow, IF pay
you everything l owe you at one time
you will collect so fast that pretty soon
you will be out of job for the want o:
something to collect
81 don't know whether that was his
reason or not but let the subject drop
and am just going around there now
for another $5."-Memphis Scimitar.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
AdvantaGes of Long Sentences.

The last summer, when | was on my
way back to Vienna from the appetite
cure in the mountains, | fell over q
cliff in the twilight and broke some
arms and legs and one thing or another
and by good luck was found by some
peasants who had lost an ass, and they
carried me to the nearest habitation,
which was one of those large, low,
thatch rooted farmhouses, with apart
ments in the garret for the family and
a cunning little porch under the deep
gable decorated with boxes Of bright
colored flowers and cats; on the ground
floor a large and light sitting room,
separated from the milk cattle apart
ment by partition, and in the front
yard rose, stately and fine, the wealth
and pride of the house, the manure
pile.
That sentence is Germanic and shows
that | am acquiring that sort Of mas
terry of the art and spirit of the Ian
guage which enables a man to travel
all day in one sentence without chang
ing cars.-Mark Twain in The Man
That Corrupted Hadleyburg."
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
I"RTfeninR HnRa

Now is the time to be pushing along
the hogs that are to be slaughtered this
winter, says The American Cultivator.
We never found anything that would
put the fat on equal to good cornmeal
or that would make pork more to our
liking. We remember a statement by
Professor Stewart in which he says
that with good hogs and proper feed
ing one should make s pounds of pork
from bushel Of raw corn or 10 pounds
from a bushel of raw meal, II pounds
from the corn II boiled and 10 pounds
from the meal if boiled. He referred to
live weight, but we think If he had
said dressed weight he would not have
lccn far from right. And yet our expe-
rier"" h"9 hcen more with what we
20 +, alded meal. or such as we had
poured boiling water over and stirred
well, allowing it to stand until cool
enough to feed. Whether a more thor
ough cooking would have improved II
we do not know We think Theodore
Louis, who is very good authority on
pork raising, fave D boiling the meal
until well cooked, but what q feeder
can do for hundreds of animals might
cost too much for labor and fuel IL
done for few
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
The Boy Aboard Shin.

Afr. Frank L. Bullen, who was once a
ship boy himself, makes in his book,
i"The Men of the Merchants Service" )"
these mournful statements concerning
the sea life of young Jacky:
within the memory of middle aged
men a boy OH board ship was the
butt, the vicarious sacrifice to all the
accumulated i'll temper of the ship. To-
day tales are told Of the treatment of
boys in 'Geordie' colliers that are
enough to make the flesh creep to hear.
In those days it was the privilege of
every man on board to ill treat the boy,
and If, as very often happened, the
poor little wretch died under it-well,
what of it?-it was only boy.
"And the peculiar part of it all was
that the brutes who did these evil
deeds prided themselves that their ac-
tions were right and proper. There
was only one way of training q boy
with a ropes end if it were handy; if
not, a fist or boot would do, but he
must be beaten.
Zone man whom / shall always re-
member, as smart seaman as ever
trod ships deck, beat me until there
was not a square inch Of my small
body unbruised. Scarcely watch
passed that l did not receive some to-
ken of his interest in my welfare, and
on two occasions he kicked me with
such violence that with all the will in
the world to obey his orders l was per-
fectly helpless. My only wonder is
that he did not kill me.
yet when left the ship he bade me
quite an affectionate farewell, bidding
me remember how hard he had labored
for my benefit, that every blow he had
given me was solely aimed at making
me more useful and fitting me for my
duties"
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
Gounod's Opinions.

Music is the most beautiful art, but
1t Is the most detestable profession
But is not that right? That which be-
longs most to heaven should fare worst
on earth.
The public moves much faster than
the Individual, and therefore the indi.
yidual must place himself before his
age If he desires not to be behind it.
Wagner has some idea of this sort. 1t
is a necessity which every true artist
must realize. Great men may be said
to be for every age save their own.
Small men are for their own and none
other.-"Reminiscen In Macmil-
lan's.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
Her Criticism.

Mary is very stout, quite deaf and
the trusted housemaid of family in
the East park section. Incidentally she
seems to be something of an art critic.
When she cleans the family rooms, she
is heard to mutter and shake her head
in busting the pictures, and she seems
to be especially severe on a few repre-
sentatives of the "altogether" that
hang in the little den. One day Mary
was flirting her dustcloth about in this
little room when her mistress happened
in. Mary was standing gazing intently
at a beautiful photograph of Bougue-
reau's cupid and Psyche"
"And phwat pictur' is thatT' asked
Mary in hard cold tones.
"Oh, that is Cupid and Psyche, "
said the lady rather indifferently.
Moody and Sankey, is ut? Well, l
hav' heered of them felleys. Sure, they
ought to be ashamed of themselves. y
Philadelphia Record.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
Reminiscence of a Thespian.

AT Brighton Beach hit Nose Rosen-
stein, who was organizing a one night
Faust" company, for job.
What part do you wish to take?" he
inquired shortly.
Il wish to take the place of Mephis-
topheles, of course" | answered, draw.
ing myself up proudly, for l had on a
new suit of clothes and could afford to
look him in the face.
and why do you wish to take that
particular partT' he inquired.
l was amazed at his dullness; but,
concealing my disgust as far as possi-
BILE, explained that it was because the
devil always gets his dues. He seemed
pleased at my repartee, wrote me out q
$500 per week contract and paid me
my first weeks salary of $3.50 in ad-
vance. l played the devil in Faust"
until nearly the end of the season, after
which l was cast in THE Foundry" a
workingman's play.-Indianapo Sun.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
--~a ~on~Tex


every Ssw good speeches are really
impromptu," said g New Orleans law
yer, who has a reputation as a clever
OYhand talker, but 1t is generally
easy to produce that effect by simply
leading or with some strictly local al
Iusion. OF course that's a trick, but
It's q trick employed by a good many
eminent orators. / was broken Of 1t
myself By rather a peculiar incident.
'One day some years ago happened
TO be In a town where large CONNER
cial college Is located and was invited
by the president to make a few re-
marks to the boys during the noon re-
cess. / mentally framed little talk
on the subject Of energy. and as was
going into the main hall CHANGED to
notice the word Push In big letters on
the outside of the door. BY Jove,' /
said to myself, that's the very thing /
need for localizing my opening SEN
tence! So when reached the platform
l launched out something like this:
My young friends, as approached
the entrance to this room a moment
ago / observed N word on the panel Of
the door that impressed me as being an
appropriate emblem for an institution
of this eminently practical character.
1t expressed the one thing most useful
to the average man when he steps into
the arena Of everyday life. 1t was
"'PullP yelled n dozen Of the boys on
the back seats. There was roar Of
laughter, and was 80 horribly discon-
certed that l was unable to take up
the thread Of my remarks. The con-
founded door had Push on one side
and Pull on the other. / had taken
my text from the wrong side."-New
Orleans Times Democrat.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
ADDPlrnncPA. A

They have called to solicit the firms
assistance for local charity
Greene-Suppose we ask this gentle
man that is coming up the aisle.
Gray-No; he's dressed too well, and
he has too much the air of enterprise
and activity. He is undoubtedly an un-
derling on small salary. We will tao
kle that slouchy looking. woebegone
little man at the desk He is sure to
be the head of the establishment
Boston Transcript.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
Knew He Loved Her.

Mrs. Duncan Stewart described Lady
Beaconsfield as originally factory
girl. Mr.. Lewis first saw her going to
her factory. beautiful and with bare
feet. He educated her and married
her. died and left her very rich, and
then she married Disraeli. When ask
ed why she married her second hus-
band. she would say, as If it was a
feather in her cap, MY dear, he made
love to me while my first husband was
alive, and therefore / knew that he
really loved me-" - Augustus ]. G.
Hare's Recollections.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
Too MuCh Latitude.

With a bright smile the beautiful
Eskimo girl left us to join the merry
throng in the ballroom.
"Your daughter is gay butterfly"
| exclaimed, desiring to lie very com
plimentary.
For my part, l don't think much
of this social life" replied the mother,
with sudden yehcmence. The idea Of
dancing every night till away along
in March and then lying in bed next
day until Aug. 1 or such a natter
1t was on my tongue to say that
these young people had too much lati-
tude, but ! checked myself.-Detroit
Journal
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
A CIinchPr.

Old LOver-I know | am old enough
to be your grandfather. but, my dar-
ling, | have an immense fortune to be-
stow upon you.
Young Heart hesitate to answer.
Old LOver-Do not keep me in sus-
pense. | have heart disease, and under
excitement | am likely to die at any
moment
Young Heart-Then will be yours.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
An Accident.

Little Bessie having been punished
for misbehavior, skunk to the other end
of the room, crying. Her mother turn
ed to view her repentance, out found
he" engaged in making faces at her
"Why, Bessie" said her mother,
'how can you DO so"
"Oh, mamma" answered the little
giyl Il was trying TO smile at you, but
my face slipped. London Answers.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10

y man W'o had experience in Alaska
was listening to a group of citizens dis
cussng the weather and broke in on
the talk thus:
"PshaW, YOU fellows don't know what
chanrcabIc weather is. You think it's
always cold in Alaska. do you? Well.
just Let me tell you a little personal ex-
pericnce Of mine. One day | went
hunting with Il party of miners. The
weather was quite warm when we
started, ana perspired freely. Sun
denly it turned bitterly cold, and large
icicles formed on my whiskers q had
grown a full beard. Crossing Il small
canyon, | came face to face with big,
ugly looking bear. | had NOTHING 'l-t
pO oer in my gun. and the man ,.lI
the cartridges was away behind me. so
as desperate resort | ramm the
icicles from my beard into the gun and
blaZed away"
"And what happened?' said one of
the crowd eagerly.
why, | struck him squarely in the
head and killed him."
"Killed him? Impossibler chorused
the crowd.
But it did, tell you. The tempera-
ture suddenly turned warm again, melt
ing the icicles, and the bear died from
water on the brain" - Detroit Free
How "A Dog stopped Dognght.
On one Of the most pleasant side
streets Of Cleveland live two dogs-a
large, dignified hound and a saucy,
small fox terrier. The two are the
best of friends, and the big dog is al
ways watching over the little one and
doing his best to keep the pert fellow
out of a fight. But the other day his
watchfulness failed. Another terrier
came and yelled defiance at tho
hounds comrade, and when the big
dog arrived upon the scene 1t was to
behold n frantic, tumbling, swapping
heap, of which his favorite was part.
He seemed to consider the state Of
things, then gave sigh Of patient dig
nifty and began to walk around the
combatants, keeping a critical eye on
the struggle and evidently acting the
part of umpire. His favorite was get
ting the worst of it, but he did not in
terfere. Maybe he thought the pun
ishment of defeat was better than any
he could bestow. He watched silently
till all at once his friend gave a yelp
Of real pain and trouble. Then sud
denly the big dog awoke. With a
bound he was beside the other two.
With one tap of his paw he sent the
victor over into the dust, grabbed his
favorite in his mouth as a cat grabs
her kitten and made off to his own
back yard.
During the next hour he licked, scold-
ed and fondled the repentant terrier.
And now the two are more devoted
than ever though the little dog seems
more meek and decidedly more obedi-
ent than Of yore.-Cleveland Plain
Dealer.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10
The Shoe and the Woman

Hereupon | ventured to reason with
the woman.
"Your conventional immunities,"
new responsibilities which you seek to
assume. That is where the shoe pinch
es"
The woman gave me whitening
look.
"Pinchesw she exclaimed most scorn-
fully. ITS mile too big! l could
wear two sizes smaller"
Oh, what a futile thing mere logic
seemed now!-Detroit Journal.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-01-10

Blobbs-When he was a little boy, he
was always singing Il Want to Be an
Angel"
.Slobbs-And he died young, | sup
pose.
Blobbs-No; but he's had his wish
gratified. He's backing Transformer
Colossal Aggregation of international
Stars.-Philadelphia Record.