Waterbury Democrat., 1901-09-06
HER IDEAL MAN.

'T understand perfectly, Miss Ash ton. As am old enough-to be your father, you thought that my point of view. though moss grown, might be interesting. This is an age in which a dignified importance is allowed even to the modern antique. As a modern antique, let me place myself entirely at your disposal"
 "Of course, if you are going to be horrid-''
 "Pray don't run away, Miss Ashton, this is to be perfectly calm deliber- ation between youth and age. Moth ing ruffles the surface of debate so rapidly as the least hint of impa- tience- If you would allow me to smoke-thanks, very much. am now all attention.'
 "Oh, if you are going to be formal and polite, Mir. Spencer, it makes ev- erything so stupid"
 ''Let me apologize at once for my politeness and my stupidity. Now, suppose begin this discussion instead of you"
 'How can you. when you don't even know?"
 ''We are sitting quite in the shade, Miss Ashton; except as defensive weapon, that parasol-"
 eff you are going to be tiresome, shall go in."
 well, I might just start the sub- ject perhaps, and if you found me wandering from the point you might gently"
 Cannot you see that am really serious, Mir. Spencer?"
 "I am sure you are, so will begin at once. You appeal to my ripe ex- perience. am 43. The vicar will con- firm this, he christened me. You, I think, are IS. I beg your pardon, 19 last June. You are staying here un- der the care of your aunt. Your aunt is highly to be esteemed. You and I both agree that the opinion of the estimable person is valueless on all practical questions. You, therefore, come to me. A younger man would feel fattered, while merely gather that, in your opinion, I am not estima- ble"
 Thank you, yes; that is very comfortable way of putting it"
 
 ton, is gratifying. Let me see, where was I? An, yes, being 19, feminine and perplexed, you Want advice. This seems to narrow the topics to two only, say either a frock or a love affair. Nowadays the man milliner is doubtless parsonage, but"
 ooh, it isn't a frock, MT. Spencer" 1"
 "I feel so immensely relieved, thought it would have been undenia- bly fattering if it had been frock; however, we will take it for granted then, that it is a love affair. Now think, Miss Ashton, that it is your turn"
 "Oh, well, you see, you can perhaps hardly-at least, I mean"
 "No, I see, have not brought you to the point of fuency yet, so I will continue. For the purpose of this discussion, let us roughly divide love affairs into two groups-the first in which both parties are equally con- vinced. What they are convinced of would be a little tedious to specify. Let nie, however, refer you to any third volume of any novel of the early Victorian period. The more re- cent works are not always orthodox. complications in which only one of the
 Have you ever met Fred Norman, Mir. Spencer?" h F
 'So it is Fred Norman, is it? Dear me. Met him? Yes, of course I have. His place is only five miles oT."
 ''Yes, I know, he was at the Ander- sons garden party-oh, and lots of other places"
 'He is comedy youth. and it is a pretty property"
 How stupid men are. You all think that because a man is young and good looking"
 About 5000 acres of the best mead ow land, believe"
 sI wish you would not interrupt me, Mir. Spencer; you all think that the whole sex must worship him." Pardon me, never mentioned worship, or even hinted of love. To arrive at a sound conclusion from 3 1 discussion such as this. it is necessary to duly marshal the facts. Kindly | let me resume, Miss Ashton. The basis of our discussion is now youth, good looks and the 5000 acres, prin- cipally meadow land"
 "Mr. Spencer, hate you. won der whether you were ever in love yourself"
 Miss Ashton, let me reassure you am a man with a past. At four years of age, made matrimonial over lures to my nurse; the good woman still lives, and my life is shadowed by this youthful indiscretion. But come we are wandering from our moutons and the pasture land. Our problem now is one-sided love affair, ir which Fred Norman is heart broken while you are scathless. Had it beer otherwise, should never have beer consulted, am sure"
 Mir. Spencer, how clever of you tc -"
 "Let us confine ourselves to facts please, Miss Ashton, and do remember that the property is 5000 acres in { ring fence.''
 "Oh, bother the acrests We'll, Mir Norman wants me to let him know by what train I am going back tt town on Wednesday. Now. do yol think he would bel mean if did should be-You see. no girl in these days like to be thought absurdll