The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1901-09-15
FUN OF THE WORLD.

told him fiat-footed that before seeing
the queen. he must state the object OF
his visit He said he wanted 10 show her
a new piece of furniture-a throne bed
a perfect throne by day and perfect
bed by night
Szz
Venerable Dr. Thurston, who is much
more al home in the mazes OF theology
than in the amenities OF social life. not
long ago was Introducing 10 a young
clergyman. a handsome whoever. a for
mer parishioner of his own. no longer
young. and extremely sensitive to che
fact. Ny brother said DR.. Thurston.
beamed with genuine affection. this IS
Miss Almeda Jennings. one OF my Old
sheep"
gg zg
The Chinese cook. realizing the import
ance Of the occasion and being especially
distinguished for making fine cakes, de-
termined MS masterpiece should be "A
great cake. He asked his mistress il she
did not think il would he nice 20 have n
motto TO ornament the frosted top OF the
cake. which was clearly intended by the
cook TO be as important from a decorative
point of view as any other. She smiling
" consented TO let him finish his work in
any way he might think suitable His
idea OF having motto with which 70
ornament the cake slipped her mind.
When the big cake appeared she was
amazed ct the result The cook was then
regularly attending a mission Sunday
school. and there he had found his motto.
Prepare to Meet Thy God,7
< Z
The story is told Of three protestant
ladies' who walked into a Catholic
church ir Ireland during high mass II
was raining. an they had gone in for
shelter. The priest. one OF natures gen
tlemen. recognized the ladies. ard. stooD-
ing down, said 10 an attendant:
Three chairs for the protestant
ladies'"
II was 4 kindly thought. but the priest
must have wished he had never thought
it when the man stood up iii the church
and shouted
Three cheers for the protestant
Iadiesr'
II was over in minute-the cheers
were cheered and could not be called
back; but It was one of the uncomfortable
moments IN the good priests life.
z
One day. Just as Pere Monsabre. the
celebrated dominican preacher of the
Cathedral OF Notre Dame Paris. was
preparing to ascend the pulpit. "a mes
sage came 10 him that lady wanted
to see him who was worried about an
affair OF conscience. After much waste
Of tins she came 10 the point She was
given up TO vanity That very morn
ing. she confessed. she had looked ia
ner looking glass and Welded TO the
temptation OF thinking herself pretty.
Pere Monsabre looked at her aad said.
quietly:
rs that all?"
That's all"
We'll my child" he replied. You can
go away in peace. for mistake is not
a sin"
sga
Since the mention of his name in con
nection with the Schley court. an old
word room story has been revived about
Rear Admiral Stephen 3. Luce il seems +
that as young man he was great beau /
and highly popular among the gay set (
surrounding the naval station at New
port on the same ship was a rather grim .
and severe senior officer. who did not APP +
prove Of social designations IN the service. I
and was on the constant lookout for any /
ieretiction on the part Of the Youngsters 4
One evening. after a round OF pleasure
Luce came back 20 the ship "a find this 7.
martinez on the deck as he stepped of 4
he gangway. The elder man looked the
Younger over. and remarked.
Mr. Luce. you're tight
Pardon me-" was the quick retort. II /.
stephen 2. Luce, how can he be tight.
dr?"
&c E
Richard Mansfield is known 10 have
5ery decided notions upon department and f
matters OF etiquette. With q friend who
; authority for the story. 1ir Mansfield
ode uptown on a Broadway car the other
ifternoon- Both meE had seats for q
line until. at the intersection OF a shop
liCg street. the car became crowded with
women. Both offered their seats 10 she
nearest women The one who accepted
dr. Mansheld's courtesy slid into his seat
Without a word The actor raised hts
Xix hat.
II beg your pardon" he said slowly.
The woman looked up apparently IN
surprise
I didn't say anything" she volun-
eered.
Pardon me for my mistake" returned
Mansfield 10 a kindly tone Pardon me- /
thought you said. Thank you"
x ER g
When France and Germany we're az war
N Englishman was arrested hy the
french and accused Of being a German
py. A letter dated Berlin. and slened
ly his mother. was found upon him Tie
vas tried by drum-head court-martial
nd condemned to be shot
On the way 20 the place Of execution
c said that he had left something behind.
nd insisted on going back for g.
You can't 20 back was the reply
You are about 20 BE- shot"
II can't help THAT" said he Il have
eft something, and 7 must get IT,
w hat have you left2
My umbrella
That settled H. He was released. 10
ne but an Engilshman. said his capfors.
ould be such thoroBgh-golas imbecne
s that
sE *
During the battle Of shiloh AZ osicsr
urriediv rode Up 70 an aid and inquired
or Grant
That's the man. with the asia glars.
aid the aid
Wheeling he horse about. the stranger I
ode furiouslv 81 tra general. ard touch
~ bis cap. addressed him th1B
~Sheneral. I wants p make one report.
chwaTtz's battery fl took
~Ah." saia the general. How waa
hatg
..weR. you see. shaneraI der s-hceul9s-
re fanzed 20. md der sheceastonfats
anne n der rear n 80 uHas- dan
chvertzs patter5 F1s took
wen. SIR. sou 70 course suksd fhe
1rs7
.-Vot-' ezciaired the German. b. as-
}nishne1t sehplke dem guns. scns -
ern new guaFz vs.. g wnif afaeG
en-
.wen~ ssia IRE general. Sharply what
.d So do
"Do7 ~ tam. Sc took dem hack
gain
Az actcs .1 ere ra1 lsslfe frHa ere ~
el~E a-erT or "a err-alr acfcF - urr-ri- :
=rce zho hslrene8 81 e. elrlra s.. a -es- 6