Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1901-11-14

Yours truly,
A. BUM
Since the change from summer to
fall the hens of Lancaster and vicinity
have been on a strike. So much so
that no eggs except few furnished
by the non-union pullets were obtain
able at the hotels. All the town
hens went out at once and the news
went out into the country and it is
supposed the rural biddies q ait laying
in sympathy, and the hen who under
takes to scab will come out with
ruffied plumage and wind up at a
CHECKED pie social.
Pharaoh was a good dreamer. In
fact, in his day he took all the cash
prizes at the district fairs as the
champion dreamer of all Egypt.
Pharaoh was a poor boy when hi first
commenced to dream, and his pa 5nts
tried to discourage him in the bust
ness as they did not believe it would
pay, but young Pharaoh persisted in
dreaming and frequently when he
was set to work in the field pulling
milk weeds and morning glory vines
from the corn, an irresistible desire
to dream would come over him and
he would seek shady fence corner
and practice at his chosen profession.
His first volume of dreams didn't sell
we'll. They were dreams of greatness
and the old folks punished him by
keeping him away from the swimming
hole on Sundays, but it was of no
avail. The Young scoundrel would
dream and seem to enjoy it although
he be punished for it the next minute.
Finally his dream of greatness came
true and he became ruler of all the
land in Egypt and then the old folks
said they always knew that boy would
be something great, and they struck
him for job in the royal gardens.
Pharaoh realized that there was luuch
profit in the dream business, so one
night he ate nine large pieces of
mince pie and went to bed to have
another dream. This time he
dreamed of seeing fourteen stalks of
green corn. Seven were thrifty and
seven were parched and burned.
Seven grew and produced three big
eals to the stalk, while the other
seven dwindled away and yielded only
seven little worm eaten nubbins.
This was a puzzle to the Egyptian
dreamer but he said nothing about it.
Next night he went to the airship and
bought SIX large pieces of mince pie
and ate them. He returned to dream
some more and this time he dreamed
Of seeing seven fat and seven lean
cows, and the seven lean cows de-
voured the seven fat one, not leaving
even the horns, and so exciting was
the scene that he awoke and called
for all the trance mediums and
soothsayers in his kingdom, but when
it came to interpreting his dream
they couldn't ''cut the mustard so
he fired the whole caboodle and sent
for young Joseph, who was doing
ten days for disturbing Mrs. Poti-
phar's peace. Joseph wasn't next
when the deputy constable came to
the jail after him. He knew that
something was wrong and feared
that old man Potiphar had got on to
something and that he would be
pulled again for yagrancy, but he
frightened up when he was taken be-
fore the ruler and asked to interpret
the dream about the corn and cows.
Joseph had never monkeyed with the
dream business any, but seeing a
chance for a good job he did not hest
tate a moment but told Pharaoh that
his dream meant seven years Of plen
y and seven years OF famine, and to
keep it quiet and they would corner
all the breadstuff il the country and
make a stake. Pharaoh tumbled in a
minute and gave Joseph a release
slip. tod him to go back to jail for
his things and Jack knife and report
for duty, for be was to be the biggest