The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1901-11-26
! ALL DUE TO A PAIR
! OF TIGHT BOOTS

/ &-.-~.->..<..%.-<..%~-.%..%..A..~-.%-..&
"How is it you have never married,
Major Henderson," asked my wife.
"Oh, l was born bachelor" replied
the major, and
"Don't be so foolish! l want to know
! the real reason
'The real reason" said Major Hender-
son slowly, sis that my feet are so small
''What do you mean?"
The major leaned back in his chair and
smiled round the table. Jane-if that girl
had been born a man, she would have
been butler to an archbshop-flled his
J glass with port, and after a sip at it he
began his story:
1t was a good many years ago that it
all happened the said slowly)-a good
many more years, in fact than l care to
count. l was young subaltern and. over
| head and ears in love with Kittie Marsh
mount. l was a timid youth in those
days, and although | thought that Kittie
rather liked me than otherwise, | had
never dared to tell her of my own feel
began something was sure to happen to
make Kittie laugh, and then all my cour-
age oozed out of my finger tips.
One evening in June there was dinner
party at the Marshmounts, and l was
there. / was off to Glib. to join my bat
terry next morning early, and l had made
up my mind to speak to Kittie that same
evening after dinner. You can imagine
| how | enjoyed the meal. | felt like d
nervous man must feel who is going to be
hanged as soon as day breaks, and to add
to my misery had ON pair of new pat
ent leather boots, which were too tight
and gave me awful pain.
As dinner went on my feelings and my
boots combined became too much for me,
and dropped my fork, on purpose, stoop-
ed down, unbuttoned the right boot
which hurt me most, and kicked it off.
The relief was wonderful and for little
while actually contrived to talk to Kit
tie.
She was charming that evening There
was something about her that showed me
she was sorry that | was leaving Eng
land, and she wore some tearoses | had
sent her in the bosom of her dress.
Miss Marshmount, / said, while des-
sert was being handed round. Il want to
talk to you very particularly after din
ner."
"Come up and sing duets instead of
smoking those horrid cigars you are so
fond of, then" was Kitties reply. And
/ felt as though | had suddenly been
translated into seventh heaven.
A few minutes later | bent down under
the table and felt about for my boot.
couldn't find it. | dropped another fork,
stopped down and looked for my property
under the table 1t wasn't there-at
least, l couldn't find it anywhere. l came
up again, purple in the face and when
the ladies left the room | couldn't open
the door for them.
Kittie was very naturally annoyed at
this, and 1 was the youngest man at the
table too. But how could l hop around
that room, in front of everybody, with
one boot on?
81 shall expect you up stairs in FIVE
minutes whispered Kittie And l think,
although, of course, l can't be certain,
that she returned the squeeze of the hand
which l gave her.
room l went down on all tours under the
table and searched everywhere for that
confounded boot of mine. 1t had van
ished as completely as last months moonI
''What the dickens are you doing, Hen
derson?' asked Tom Marshmount. 1t
might have been better if | had told him
at once, but he was one of those incorri-
gible iokers who would have bothered me
IL, oh o1l ~ o bo
had known, so | told him it was nothing.
Then Kittie came back into the room
to speak to her brother for a few mo-
ments. She sat there, darting daggers'
thru It's at me out of those gentian blue
eyes of hers. l forgot to say that l had
lit big cigar, to give myself countenance
and think up a plan for finding my boot
again.
"Well," said Kittie presently, 81 am
going up to the drawing room again, but
] can't make my entry among all the dow
ayers without the support of a manly
arm And she looked straight at me.
felt the perspiration pouring down my
cheeks and forehead and l know that l
bushed scarlet, but didn't move. How
could /? / couldn't lead Kittie Marsh
mount into her mothers drawing room
with lone boot off and the other boot on"
like the boy in the nursery rhyme.
Then George Heseltine came up, smil-
ing fatuously, as ne always did, and Of
fered his arm to kittie.
She took it, of course and afterward,
as you know, she took George Heseltine
as well, the brute!
Directly she had gone l crawled down
under the table again and right over in
the far corner, near the head of the table,
/ saw the point of the boot which had
played me such a nasty trick It's ex-
traordinary, ! thought, how these mani
mate objects travel reached out for it,
but it had stuck, somehow. | gave it a
good pull. There was a crash, yell, and
when l came out from underneath the Ia
bic | found old Marshmount on his back
in the fireplace with all the other men
standing round him trying not to laugh.
Old Marshmount was choleric old
chap. and the language he used was
frightful. He thought had been play
ing off a practical joke on him, and he
was furious. l tried to explain, but ev
cry word | said was drowned, either by
old Marshmount's language or by the
laughter of the other fellows, and 1
couldn't get a word of explanation in.
Luckily the old man wasn't really hurt,
but only shaken, and presently he got up
and led the way to the drawing room.
/ followed last, hobbling along as best
could and trying to hide my bootless
foot behind the other one.
young chap must be going mad!" were
the words | heard in old Marshmount's
growl as 1 made my way into the room.
Just as my luck would have it, Kittie
was sitting on the far side of the room,
and didn't dare cross over under the fire
of the dowager's eyes with only one boot
on and the other foot in a blue silk stock
ing. 1t was horribly t2ntaliz'ng. for Kit
tie was ON Il little sofa near the piano and
there was lots Of room for two.
| remained standing by the doc, hid
den-at least, ny right foot hidien-be-
hind large standard lamp and spent
miserable ten minutes watching Kittie,
whom Heseltine had joined upon the sofa
Presently tea came in, and behind the
footman with the biscuits trotted Fido.
Filo was kittie's spaniel-a nasty little
King Charles |. beast, with more ears
than sense. The little brute had my boot
in his silly mouth and was pretending
that it was a rat and worrying it. If it
had been rat, he would have squealed
and hidden away underneath a chair. l
I Jo bat fn, I'd tO