Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1901-07-11
Short Notes.

Picture frames are frequently hung
because Of their guilt.
The person who Is mosquito proof
these days IS lueky one.
Money is now reported easier on
Wall street. That means that it's
easier not to get than otherwise.
The young man who takes a pretty
girl our rowing is a chump if ne con-
fines his hugging TO the shore.
A Chicago aeronaut fell distance
of 200 feet and escaped unlnjured.
| It's ten TO one that he'd break his
neck if he stepped on banana peel.
Mother Eve may have invented
curiosity. but she Is the only woman
on record wis never turned around
to see what the other women had on.
An Atkinson girl practiced on the
piano two hours every day for three
years, except SUNDAY and Christmas.
and now plays such classical music
that it is worse than the rag time she
played when she begun.
According to a Chicago man, that
city will include Milwaukee in hun
bred years. Possibly, however, the
breweres may move to Chicago. and
then there will be no need tor the rest
Of the city
Telephone girls in Chicago have
been ordered TO walk down nine flights
of stairs during tie rush hours. They
are fair but also fat. Going up, Of
course, the elevator must take its
chances.
Occasionally an Office seeks the man,
but the majority Of them are kept
busy trying to dodge him.
The man who pulls his gun towards
him from boat by grasping it by tue
muzzle has not yet been eXterminated.
Mr.. Jones wants to make the Phil
lipine question paramount next year.
Why not take up the slavery question
or some other nice. new topic that
has not been settled.
A man who is domiciled in a village
boarding house has no use for the
local paper.
1t is probably the taking ways Of
the photographer that makes his
patrons always look pleasant.
1t was rough on that woman muir
deress out west To be convicted, sent
10 iail for ten years. just when she
hao so = splendid chance to 90 on
the stage.
The servant girl union has been
formed in Chicago Now let the new
woman wrestle with the walking dele
gate and see how she likes it.
A funny, man has said There are
some noses you cant lose sight of for
they are always turning up.
Here's a COW story which you may
believe or not: John Jones lost a COW
last week in strange manner. The
animal in wandering through a kitch-
en- found and swallowed an old UNI
brella and cake of yeast. The yeast
termented in the beasts stomach.
raised the umbrella and she died in
great agony.
It's as difficult fer man to keep a
diary as ii is for woman to keep q
point on pencil
man usually puts his best foot
forward butt : different with mule.
There are MANY laws. but there is
no law against breaking them.
at a fire in Georgia last summer,
there being no water at hand, some
little colored boys pelted itwith water
melons that were growing in a nearby
field. aud the bursting melons soon
pat out the fire.
The summer girls costume Is what
YOU might &c mean enough 10 cali
fishing tackle
/ have new type Writer,
And it is my delight
TO pat on it gailY
And write. and and writes
1t aidss mE in my labors9
When I'm in WORKING veins
1t maeeS A GREAT imProvEment5)
| write So very plain
1t operates sosw, EtlY$@
that when You find you're sTUck;;
and Cannot find the letter
iustGiab-and trust to luck6SJ?
It's Easv-V7ry easy
TO opeRAte its tehn;;;S?6&5o
Now wheae on earth's that colon?
Xxx X