The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1901-12-01
FUN OF THE WORLD.

Following Is an extract from vf7c Jour
cal Of an author who has not been for
tunste enough 10 write successful novel
REESE at and thought out plot for a
short story.
At l rang the breakfast bell. moved
the chairs around the table and ratified
the knives 10 fool the neighborS.
Wrote two poems on the world as a
great place 10 fast in also a short article
% prove that appetite IS mere celuSion-
Il then went 10 the poStofiice TO hear
CLERK say there had been q wreck on the
road and my check for late manuscript
wouldn't arrive until after Christmas
beautiful day ] went ont and cined
sumptuously on the climate
When does the next train that stops
az AontroSe leave here" asked the reso-
lutte woman at the booking office win
dow.
'Youn have to wait five hours. ma'am''
4 don't think so.
Well. perhaps you know better than I
Yes sir, And perhaps YOU know better
than I do whether I am expecting 10
travel By that train myself or whether I
am inquiring FOR a relative that's visiting
at my house, And maybe YOU think It's
yOur business 10 stand behind there and
try 10 instruct people about things they
know as well as you do. II not better
And perhaps you'll learn some day to
give people civil answers when they ask
You civil questions. young man; but my
opinion IS you won't
Yes. ma'am.' .gasped the booking clerk.
< * *
y tiny girl Of seven gave a dinner party
the other day. for which twelve covers
were laid. and that number OF small
maidens sat down TO dine. II was a real
little girls dinner. and the little hostess
herself presided. sitting at the head Of
the table. She had been very anxious. In
looking forward 10 it, 70 do everything as
IL should be done
Mamma" she asked, shall we say
grace"
NO" said mamma; 1T will be a very
informal dinner. and 1 think YOU need not
do that
That meant one ceremony less 20 he
gone through and was a relief. But the
little lady was anxious 70 have all her
guests understand il. So. as they gath
cred about the table. she explained.
Mamma says that this Is such an infer
nal dinner that we need not have grace
today
gz Es
Seems to me that the rising generation
Is rising pretty fast. said the bachelor
who expects soon TO become a benedict
after his friends had given him up as
hopeless. 4 WAS out walking with my
intended the other day. and her small
niece. a girl not over years OF age. ac-
companied US. Naturally the converse
ton, owing TO the near approach Of our
wedding day. took turn that was inter
esting 10 two Of us. but not to the third.
Finally / turned TO the young lady who
is soon TO be my bride and said with
smile:
I suppose all this talk is over the lit
tie ones head?
Before she could reply the voice or the
little one went up several degrees. and
she answered. icily. her words falling like
SO many hailstones on tin roof.
" on, don't mind me- I know what Il
is. I've been in love myself"
1T was several minutes before I sue
ceeded in catching my breath"
x X R Il
Daniel Webster once dined with an old
Boston merchant. and when they came 20
the wine dusty old bottle was carefully
decanted by the servant and passed by
the host. Taking the bottle. he filled
Webster's glass and handed it to him.
Then. pouring out another for himself. he
held it to the light and said
How do you like IL. Mr.. Webster
II think it is a fine specimen OF old
port
Now can you guess what it cost me2''
asked the host.
Surely not said Webster. L only know
that IL II excellent"
We'll now. ] can tel you. for 7 made
n careful estimate the other day. When
] add the interest 20 the first price. ind
that il cost me the sum OF just i've shiil-
ings per glass"
Good o-uefnuef Vars
cried Webster. And then. draining his
glass, he presented il again with the re-
mark:
Fill It up again as quick as you can.
for want 10 stop that COMPOUNDED in
terest"
szs
The best Jimmy Whistler story that
I have heard since Mr. Chsse's talk on
the famous painter last April was told
here AT a dinner on Wednesday last. Mr..
was a guest at dinner given
by John Sargent. the well known por-
trait painter. The little artist dined
royalty and was very merry. After din
ner he asked Sargent II he might be ex-
cused while he wrote an important note
that had slipped his mind
Certainly. certainly. replied Sargent.
YOU will find ink and writing materials
IN the small room at the head Of the
stairs-help yourself
Thanks said Whistler and disappear
cd. Presently the other guests we're
startled by hearing a series Of bumps
ending in a heavy thud al the foot OF the
stairs. Whistler had tripped. lost his
balance. and fallen IN a heap. Sargent
rushed out. picked him NJ. and anxiously
asked n he was hurt.
''TIurtg" said whistler. rubbing hiss
head: well. I'm not dead. II that's what
you mean: but tell me. who built those
stairs?" Sargent mentioned the name ~
4 builder unknown 20 Whistler or 10 fame.
He did dld he2' said Whistler The
g. teetotslerf
re
Before We were married said the
good looking young woman. my husband
y A. able 10 do his work ~ much Jess tine
than he requires nov
He probably had Jess 10 do then an
Fwered the lady whose Husband has Tor a
ong tine been busy working his way I'D.
Is Il true then that the hiThcr o man
-iges IN HE business the more he becomes
he slave Of it, Or course ] understand
hat a mar . responsibility must increase
ss ne advances. but J have always sup
1osed that the hours - work were likely
20 b.. shortened a. ono mounted upward.
wei. that perhaps is true. 40 least 20 {
most cases Ny husband says be- hf6s II
possible 20 get along without actually {
rorkiug more than Two ~ three hours
iav. whereas b. used - - tied down az .
desk from s-an IN the raoT=lnE urtn 81 /
llght But in those tao ~ three nnurs i
~ does g hundred Tires more than b. 4
SEED q accomplish in a lonE ds5
That's the Way ! thought y vas. the /
lady sid Before sc uers 1
married. when ny husband Eert saaT 4
.n 9 business sr1r ~ could frd fne tirae 4
n urife ne a long 'orE letter every day 4
-zoraeffrnes more than Sle FoE wfen I
l. goes get = telegram about n-re ~
v-ice pees ike this, An vel aerg
rasy sFhat would Fo8 d. a8gat g