davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
TriaIs OF n Lecturer.

4 well known English woman lee
turer tells these stories at her own eX-
penSe:
Il was" she says, "on tour through
the provinces, and one night as | ap-
peared on the platform in a small town
the chairman introduced me to my au-
dience in the following way: You have
heard of Mr.. Gladstone, the Grand Old
Man. Let me now introduce to you
the grand old woman This was in
tended as 4 sincere compliment.
"On another occasion bluff old farm
er, who boastcd Of his ability to look
on all sides of Il question, announced
me as follows: This lady's come here
to talk about her rights he said. She's
hired the hall, and 50 she's got right
to be here. and if any Of you don't like
what she's got to say you've got an
equal right 10 walk ont in the middle
ont"
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
OhserEnfInnah hN Mildred

Scene: Tramcar. Dramatis persona
Four-year-old girl, mother and severa!
passengers.
Child 0n high, shrill treble)-Mamma,
did you get papa's birthday present?
Yes, dearest"
''What did you get. mamma
cigars, loyey."
The cheap ones that Aunt Millie told
you about?"
Silence from mamma, but heighten-
ed flush on her face that was not entire
Iy the reflection from dearest lovey's"
red velvet hat.
Mamma. that man over there has on
Il 1rcadfully dirty necktie. You told
papa the other day that no gentleman
would wear a soiled necktie."
Man GIarcs and pulls his coat about
his neck.
Mildred, stop talking"
Mildred was silent for little while.
Mamma, that lady over there forgot
to polish her shoes this morning.
London Spare Moments.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
THE POULTRY YARD.

Gravel or coarse sand Is as much
needed as ordinary food.
All chickens want for health, growth
and good conditions is plain, nutritious
food.
Even when the fowls have an unlim-
tied range it is good plan to feed
them every evening.
One OF the first things TO learn about
poultry is that they must be kept clean
and free from ycrmiu.
Peafowls are handsome and subsist
with the least care of any kind OF
fowls They are prolific layers and a
good protection against hawks.
Raw bone contains every part Of an
egg-white, yolk and shell. Therefore
It should be kept constantly before lay
ing hens in The granulated form.
One of the best ways Of removing lice
from fowls is to make them do 1t them
selves by having a lot of dry earth
where they can dust themselves when
ever they feel like it.
The comb is always an index to the
condition Of the bird. When the comb
is white or very pale or very black,
something is wrong. \ healthy fowl
shows a bright scarlet color in the
comb
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
Riley and His Work.

he poet who IS nearest and dearest
he heart of the great American peo-
is James Whitcomb Riley.
. those who know him and have
rd him recite with simple. unaffect-
pathOs some of his poems like
)odby. Jim" they assume new
this of meaning. Dialect is not an
entail of his muse, for some of his
utiful sonnets would give him Il
oe even If he had never written in
,ect.
'uring the past few years Mr.. RI
5 life has deepened into more ear
tness and fuller realization of his
ibilities. The serious purpose has
leSsened his fun loving nature nor
appreciation Of jest. In the old
when he was a sign painter in In
apolis he enjoyed being led around
he wonderful blind man" He en-
d fooling the public with his exqui-
poem 'Leonaine. " which he credit
Poe.
his best trick was when the fam
homestead was threatened to be
'loSed. He and his sisters sent the
'olks 10 California on a trip, and
/ they were gone he paid the mort
and propped up the fences, rebuilt
parn, fixed the corncribs, brighten
g old familiar furniture and then
ed the Homecoming of the old peo-
Who didn't recognize the place.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
Whom ConI Was Prohibited.

1t makes the present generation smile
70 read the accounts which have come
down to us concerning the prejudices
which were formerly entertained
against certain articles which are OF
everyday consumption.
For instance, it is said that when coal
was first used In England the prejudice
against it was so strong that the house
of commons petitioned the king to pro
hibit the use of the ''noxiOus" fuel.
\ royal proclamation having failed to
abate the nuisance, n commission was
issued to ascertain who burned coal
within the city Of London and its neigh
borhOOd, TO punish them by force for
the first offense and by the demolition
OF their furnaces If they persisted in
transgressing. \ law was finally pass
ed making it a capital offense to burn
coal in the city and only permitting It
to be used by fOrgcs in the vicinity. 1t
Is stated that among the records IN the
Tower Of London a document was
found according to which a man was
hanged In the time of Edward |. for no
other crime than having been caught
burning coal. IL took three centuries
to entirely efface the prejudice.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
Pretty Enir Shnta.

In an English paper there appeared
recently the vcracious story of two
brothers who lived in the Rocky noun
tains. They had two rifles, one bullet
and keg of powder With this outfit
they managed to kill on an average
twcnty-ScyCn head Of buffalo q day.
The way they managed was this: Broth
or No. ! would stand on one side Of
buffalo ana shoot through it. the bullet
going into Tie barrel OF the rifle of
Brother No. >, who stood on the other
SIDE Then Brother No. would fire
through the next buffalo into the rife
Of Brother No. l, and so on until the
days sport was over.
Some one who saw this story has
written to say that he Is acquainted
with a man, n cousin, he thinks, of the
two mentioned, who also lived in the
Rocky mountains at one time. He had
one rifle, one bullet and a keg Of pow
der, yet he managed to kill thirty head
Of buffalo n day-buffalOes were plenty
then-and the way he did it was this:
He was not only champion shot, but
b. champion runner, and when he fired
through n buffalo he would run around
and catch the bullet again to reload
with. and so on until he exhausted his
powder
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
For a Very Gnnd Rcnnnn

81 told him | would make him eat his
words" declared Mr. Beechwood hotly,
speaking Of a quarrel he had had with
Mr.. Erushton. He has been telling
things ahou' me that are rank un-
truths
How foolI>hly men talk to one an
other" commented Mrs. Beechwood
placidly.
What do you mean| demanded her
husband. do you intend to insinuate
that men talk to each other more fool
ishly than women chatter"
'Of course | do" the lady went on
imperturbably. Now women never
try to make each other eat their words,
no matter how angry they may be"
"Certaiuly not" retorted Mr. Beech
wood, and for a very good reason too"
What reason" she demanded.
Because their digestive apparatus Is
inferior TO their vocabulary" - Pitts
burg Chronicle-Telegraph
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
All Cheese Is DenReIy Populated.

Professor AdamctZ, who devoted con-
siderable time To the study OF the fra
grant subject said that the population
Of an ordinary cheese when a few
weeks old is greater than the number
of persons upon the earth.
Professor AdametZ made some inter
cstiug researches dealing with the MI
mute organisms found In cheese From
a microscopic examination Of soft
variety of Gruycre cheese he obtained
the following statistics: In fifteen
grains of cheese, when perfectly fresh,
from 10000 to 10000 microbes were
found, and when the cheese was sew
enty days old the population had in
creased TO 100000 in each fifteen
grains. An examination OF a denser
cheese at twenty-five days old proved
it 10 contain 100000 in each gram
about fifteen grains) and when forty
five days old 100000 in the same
small particle.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
Now They NrHer Snenk.

A cOolnesS growing out of the fol-
lowing conversation has sprung up be-
tween Jones and Smith.
Il had a splendid time last night"
said Jones. Il spent the evening at a
little social gathering at the Goodman
mansion"
Are the Goodmans nice people?'
queried Smith.
We'll, l should say so. They are
very aristocratic. To get into their cir
Gle one must have either a great deal
Of money or a great deal of genius"
You don't tell me SO? And you say
you were there|
Yes"
You were invited. were your
"Of course"
"And To be invited a man has to have
plenty of money or a great deal of gen.
iusT"
Precisely"
"Well. Jones, am very glad to hear
you have become rich all OF a sudden.
Lend me five pounds"-London An
swers.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
Antiquity of PLAYING Cards.

The game Of cards was first played
In the east and seems To have had a
military origin. Cards were introduced
from Asia into Europe at the time OF
the crusadcs and We're first used by
necromancers 10 foretell fortunes They
soon became a popular amusement in
the south of Europe, where the Sara
Gems and Moors taught the people how
10 use them, and card playing spread
TO all parts of the continent. The state
records Of Germany mention the fact
that Rudolph l., in 1875, was fond Of
the game and played with his court
iers.
After the invention Of paper the man
ufacture of cards became extensive,
but declined somewhat when card play
ing was forbidden by several OF the
German states and by the English gov
ernment on account Of the supposed
immoral tendency. Before the era OF
paper cards In the orient were made
Of ivory. papyrus and canvas, less fire.
quently Of the precious metals and
quite commonly of wood.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
HOURGLASSES.
They Have Not Gone Out OF style by
a Long shot.

Most people lauk raat hourglasses
went out Of style Years ago." said a
clerk in a IWyuty-th.rd street store.
"al0ng with pgIukcs and knee breeches.
but aS Il matter Of fact We have more
calls for them today than we have had
at any time within the last ten years.
That this renewed popularity of the
hourglaSS augurs its universal accept
ance rs timcpicce by the coming gen
GRAFTON | am not prepared 10 say, but
If such n rvHa i>>ancc were TO become
assured iC would be- Uu more SuTpris-
ing than some oi jb" other recent fads
based on Il r,,:yaI of lost customs.
Anyway a brief study of the hourgIass
will do nobody harm. There are thou
sands in this generation who have not
the slightest idea what an hourglass
looks like, and it won't hurt them to
broaden their education a little along
certain lines.
"Of the hourEIaSses sold at present
the thrc" minute glass is in the lead.
This glass is used almost exclusively to
measure time in boiling eggs, and its
usefulness naturally places its sales a
little in advance Of the more scnti-
mental varieties. Next come the five,
ten and fifteen minute and full hour
glasses. which are bought chiefly by
musicians for piano practice and by
lodges and secret societies.
THE sand used in an hOurglaSS is the
very finest that the world affords. The
western coast of Italy furnishes most
of it. as It has done for ages past. The
cost of hourglasses is regulated by the
of the frames. A glass
set in 4 plain rosewood case can be
bought for 81, while mahogany frame
comes 10 Sl.5O or s.. or course the
price can be brought up still higher by
fancy carving and decoration. Swell
lodges sometimes 90 TO this extra ex-
pense. but most people are satisfied
with the cheaper grades. New York
Sun.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
How tn Catch the Polar Rear.

| listened attontivCly the other night
10 4 gentleman who gave me a great
deal Of valuable information concern
ing these interesting regions. He knew
| was tendcrfoOt and a newspaper
reporter and felt at liberty, therefore, to
talk freely, SO got a lot of yarns about
polar bears and walruses and other
creatures, large and small, which are
not related in natural histories. | be-
lieve it was one of the advisers Of
"Alice In Wonderland" who suggested
that the best way to catch a rabbit is
20 get behind a stump and make a
noise like 4 carrot. and | learned with
great satisfaction that the easiest way
to catch Il polar bear is to hide behind
an iceberg and make a noise like the
aurora borealis. Polar bears are very
tame and, like newspaper reporters and
some other people, are gifted with in
quiring minds. When a stranger comes
out on the ice, they greet him cordially
and show a justiiable curiosity as to
his business and intentions, which
causes them TO fall an easy prey TO the
parlor rug trust.-Norway Letter In
Chicago Herald
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
They Found the Pail.

During a spell of particularly hot
weather a well known baronet came
across three workmen engaged on a
job on his estate. One Of them remark
ed, as workmen not infrequently do,
on the dryness Of the Job The heat
had perhaps extended itself to the bar
onet's temper. At any rate, he turned
away, with the reply: If you are
thirsty, you know where the well is
You will find pail there"
Thinking over his remark a little lat
er, it flashed across the baronet's mind
that he had given orders for three bot
ties Of champagne to be put into the
pail and lowered into the well to cool
for dinner. He hastened to the well
and discovered - three empty bottles!
What he said this time is not reported
London Truth
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
A Grenf Storm MnNe.

A great storm wave is peculiar to cy-
clones. At the center Of the disturb
ance the mercury in good barometer
may be lower by three inches than that
in Il similar instrument on the verge
Of the cyclone. This is owing to the
d!minution of atmospheric pressure
consequent on the rotation OF the air
wheel, and as nature abhors a vacuum
the sea in the vortex rises above its
usual level until equilibrium is restor-
ed. This storm wave advances with
the hurricane and rolls in upon the low
land like Il solid wall. In the Backer-
gunge cyclone Of 1876 the storm wave
covered the land at the eastern end Of
the Ganges delta at heights varying
from ten 10 forty-tiye feet, as measured
by marks On the trees. One hundred
thousand lives were lost on this occa-
sion.-Chambcrs Journal
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
A "Loop" Witness.

Schley inquiry has given striking
ICE of how the doctors sometimes
zee. Officers with apparently
opportunities for observation
the Santiago blockade and the
that resulted in the destruction
rvera's fleet have made directly
ting statements, and logs have
'ound to disagree with nearly ev-
iy, including sometimes the man
yrote the log. One of the interest
witnesses has been Lieutenant
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
CHARLES II. CRANfP.

the usual heavy long twelve inch
rs. They have been adopted after
.ch discussion in the American navy,
er having been diScountenanced by
Try other country.
he comment Of Mr.. Cramp, coming
IN Il practical shipbuilder Of the
hest repute. deserves and will re
ve the highest consideration and ap-
lrs to bc based upon the experience
naval men In actual engagements
we'll as upon his own judgment. A
nber OF the heaviest of recent bat
ships have been fitted with this type
turret, which has, however, never
N in use in battle, but bids fair. In
Cramps estimation, to further
lplicate the handling Of the guns in
turrets. already difficult by reason
the meager view Of the target af
ded by the peepholes.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
His Reform.

Lady-What is the matter with my
husband?
Doctor cannot be sure yet. Have
you noticed him doing anything unusu-
al lately:
Let me see. Well, last evening, in
stead Of lighting his cigar the moment
he left the table. he walked into the Ii.
brary and put on his smoking jacket,
smoking cap and slippers before begin
ming To smoke"
Hum, Ny, my"
and later on, when he wrote a let
ter, he wiped the pen on penwiper."
Horrors. It's paresis"'-New York
Weekly.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
Child Baptism In E.rIv Dav,.

The following from the early court
records Of York county, Me. we give
verbatim ct literatim: AT general
court held at Saco Sept. II, 1910. it is
ordered by the court that the Worship
tul Thomas Georges and Edward Cod
frey, councillors for this province, shall
order all the inhabitants from Pisca-
taquiS TO kenebache, which shall have
any children unbaptized as soon as
any minister is settled In any Of their
plantations, they bring their said chill
dren 10 baptism, and if any shall refuse
TO submit to the said order that the
party 50 refusing shall be summoned
to answer their contempt at the next
general court TO be holden in this prov
inCc. Journal.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
Italian BrigandaEe In lS4S.

One summer evening in the crowded
theater an impatient house demanded
the drawing of the curtain preliminary
to the first act. When at last it was
upraised, II Passatore and his armed
band occupied the stage, with muskets
aimed al the affrighted audience. The
chief stated that he should levy a tax
per head, which he then and there col
lected. The gang made off with their
booty unmolested. - Lady PresturChs
Essays"
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
Sin Promoters.

His satanic majesty announced that
he intended taking much needed va
cation.
Some surprise being expressed at this
action, he explained:
well, I've fixed things so that the
trolley motormen will refuse to stop for
passengers when they are in a hurry,
and guess that will keep things going
until return Baltimore American.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
Away From Home.

1t IS becoming the fashion for a wo-
man to seek a maternity hospital that
her children may be horn amid conven-
fences lacking at home. The children
are sent away from home to school.
They are married away from home, and
members of the family are taken to
hospitals for their final Illness and bur
led from an undertakcr's parlor 1t is
becoming fashion TO take everything
from home except the family rows.
They are still sacred to the family
hearth.-Atchison Globe
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
Gold.

The specific gravity of gold is 1850
that Is, it weighs nineteen and half
times as much as its own bulk of Wa
ter. The ductility and maIIeability of
this metal are equaled by no other. By
ductility is meant the property of al
lowing itself TO be drawn out into a
wire and by malleability It's property
of hattening without splitting under
the hammer.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
WIN Mnfer Mnn,t ErY-

Why cannot we fry in water? Be
cause water can only be heated 10 the
boiling point. 2l2 degrees, and any ad-
ditional heat does not increase It's TEN
perature. Two hundred and twelve de
grees OF heat will not brown the sur
face Of anything Fat on the contrary.
can be made much hotter, the tempera-
ture depending on the kind. There is n
lesson here for the economical house
wife Don't stuff the stove with fuel
when the vegetables, meat, etc, are
already boiling. They cook no faster
because Of the increase Of heat
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07

Horton-You used to think Bember
was a great friend Of yours. l notice
he never offers to help you now that
you need help.
Snobel-No, but, then, you must not
forget how free he was to offer me as
sistance when l didn't need it-Boston
Transcript.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
No RcciprOcitN,

"Brownly thinks he has the smartest
child in the world"
Yes answered the morosc man.
THAT illustrates the ingratitude of life.
There isn't one chance in a thousand
that that child when he grows up will
20 around declaring that he has the
smartest father in the world. ."-Wash-
ingtOn Star.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07

Charles Kingsley thus counseled a
friend: "Makc it rule and pray to
God to help you to keep it never, if pos
sible, 10 lie down AZ night without be
Ing able to say, I have made one hu-
man being at least little wiser, a lit
tie happier or a little better this day
You will find It easier than you think
and pleasauter."
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
,nkiewicz Not Il Playwright.

lkiewicZ, the great Polish novel
as decided not TO write a play.
information was brought to
lea by Nine. Modjeska. who dur
er recent trip abroad had several
with the distinguished Pole.
kiewicz," said Nine Modjeska.
aimed that he had found out that
writing and playwriting were
ntirely different things, and as he
llready made quite a success in
rrmer line he did not care to risk
sible failure In the latter"
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
OF More hmm ediate Value

Miss Emerson (of Boston)-I presume
yours is not one of the Mayfiower fam
lilies.
Miss Triplex (Of Minneapolis)-No,
indeed. Ours Is one of the famous
Minnesota flour families. -- Chicago
News
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
Not An1Iou. 10 Meet Him

"Jinks has had a burglar alarm put
in his house, with a gong in every
room"
He wants to be sure to know about
the burglarsT"
"No; be wants the burglar to be sure
TO be alarmed "-Philadslphia Record.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
The Egunlity Line,

"All people," remarked the earnest
citizen, are born equal"
Perhaps" answered the deliberate
friend, but they don't stay equal any
longer than it takes for their parents
to provide them with clothes and play
things Exchange.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
A WOInnn RnInncinp

When a woman stoops over to pick
up something on the floor. why doe,
she always balance herself on one foot,
extending the other outward and back
ward as a counterpoise? This queS.
ton, not new, never has been satisfac
torily auSwered.-New York Press.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
AbOut Ozone.

y people talk about ozone with
much as knowing what ozone is.
Is n prevalent Idea that it Is
hing you get at the sea and that
good for the lungs. What that
hing is, however, few people have
ent curiosity to inquire. Ozone Ia
chemists call an allotropic form
'gen-that is to say, It Is oxygen
ghly active and concentrated CON
In ordinary pure air ozone ex-
)ut only In what chemists call
g" Larger amounts are found In
and mountain air. 1t instantly
,ears when brought in contact
decaying matter, dissipating it
$ II were, in the act Of OXidiziDg
latter.
le Is known 10 occur more plenti-
during thundcrstormS, and we
Of course, the analogy OF It's be-
tifiCially produced from oxygen
ctrical discharges in the labora-
On the body ozone is believed to
a stimulant; hence the popular
cf It's beneficial effects as expe-
J Iv -he sea. but in any greater
& than mere traces 1t is a violent
{. one authority goes the length
r,ing that II Is doubtful whether
aneticial 10 animal life at all
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07

Connections at Rupert with Philadelphia &
Reading Railroad for Tamanend, Tamaqua,
Williamsport, Sunbury, Pottsyille, etc. A,
Northumberland with p and +. Div. p. X. X. for
Harrisburg. Lock Haven, Emporium, Warren
CORY, and Erie.
Daily. + Daily except unday. fStop on
signal.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
EOPLE OF THE DAY
Mr.. CrRmp on the Turret.

Il Charles II. Cramp, the veteran
val shipbuilder, has created a Sensa-
n by his letter to the navy depart.
NJ condrmning the application of
> superimposed rurretS in the recent
)e Of battleship. These turrets are,
use the vernacular, TWO stories in de-
n, the upper inclosure containing
lerally eight inch rifles and the low