The Iola register., 1901-08-23
KANSAS CLIPS AND COMMENTS

|
Farmers in some counties are fgur-
ing the average corn yield at forty
bushels to the township"
In order that there may be no mis-
understanding the Winfield Courier
man says he hates a liar.
The state board Of agriculture esti-
mates the population of Kansas today
at l.467, ,SOs, the largest in thirteen
years.
In the cemetery at Highland, ac-
cording to the Vidette, stands shaft
on which is engraved: "Boys-this
is on me-"
Here is a chance for some ambitious
hog. The editor of the Augusta
Journal wants a shoatto help him edit
the paper next winter.
A bolt of lightning entered an Ar
kansas City kitchen, passed through
lard can and then wentout of the room
like creased lightning.
A st. Marys butcher carries an ad.
in the Eagle, headed; "MCAT MAR
KET." If IN" is an abbreviation of
tom" the riddle is read.
That unfortunate Miss Beals of
| Wichita, who was so meanly hogged
by that man Woods, estimates that
her claim is worth $25, 900.
In Kansas City they call Sunday
evening counting "Sabbatarian SOM
nambulency." In Eldorado they call
it "hot stuff" says the Republican.
Tickets for swell dance in Arizona
are being issued at $50 each. 1t is the
Moki Indian Snake Dance and the
SantaFe has charge of the invita-
tions.
The value OF this years wheat crop
in Sumner county is placed at four
million dollars. That is one of the
most interesting cereal" stories of
the year.
Whenever an Emporia girl gets mad
she grabs her bat and leaves the
house declaring she intends to drown
herself as soonas thereis water enough
in the river.
Tramps nightly occupy the otherwise
vacant houses in Newton and are not
driven out because that would make
the towns boast of "no vacant
houses" falsehood.
Dave Hunter of Emporia cut three
crops from his alfalfa patch, two for
hay and one for seed. For the hay he
got $50 per acre and for the seed $50
an acre, or SS5 an acre.
The Press says Concordia man
stood before a window in which was a
placard: Ladies' waists half off,"
Asked why he remained he said he was
awaiting developments.
The Santa Fe bill clerk at Arkansas
City opened up his desk one morning
and big, green snake wriggled out.
And yet they talk about drinking men
not holding Jobs with railroads.
The editor of the Lawrence World
recently ate some preserves II years
old. That Colorado man who tested
the air brake on runaway ear down
Pixies Peak isn't the only nervy ed
| itor.
| Ewing Herbert says that the idea
that you have enemies is egotism.
| What does he think of a man who is
so satisfied with himself he thinks the
whole world has bowed in silent APP
proval
Paper hats are losing popularity.
| One man discovered they easily lighted
from a cigar, and "a young lady in To-
peka was caught in the rain aud the
| N'''' '''Fa 'NAi VIZ ii'A ihN anu Slblltu
her waist.
Carrie Nation has gone east and.
like too many Kansans, as soon as
she passed the borders she cracked u
bottle with friend. Only the friend
whose bottle suffered is no longer
friendly.
The fact that lightning tore an Atch-
ison mans arm as he stood in the
door with a razor in his hand will
probably not stop the colored boys
from carrying razors when ever "de
clouds roll by"
Wichita gave $4,000 in bonds and
thy stock yards gave 500. 900 and the
Dold Packing Company has agreed to
rebuild its burned plant there. When
the good news came the town folks had
Il regular hog KILN " time.
! Emporia people are religious and
when a thief was caught taking pota-
toes everyone went around talking
about the Bible coming true in what it
said of tbe fate of those who had
aught to do with 'eyes that see not,
etc. "
The Atchison Globe tells of man
who had attended a Thomas orchestra
and was asked what he thought of IT,:
well, sir, | was very much Impress
ed They hauled that brass drum all
, the way from Chicago arc only beat
, it once"
{ Grant Sidwell. of Wilson, Kansas,
ompleted his army service in the
Philippines and has married Luzon
belle worth $l,500,0OO. The little
! brown brother may be a myth but the
little brown sister-in-law will not be II
there are many such heiresses.
AS sort of excuse for locating q
wholesale brewing house. the Leaven-
e worth papers next day announced that
Q "the city water is rotten. The inter-
g esting fact was discovered. not by its
+ effects on people, but its effects on en-
= gine boilers. Leavenworthans don't
, use water.
A small boy in the short grass
a country watched with awe while the
f visiting minister ate biscuits, a
o beeisteak and a chicken for breaksfast.