The St. Louis Republic. [volume] (St. Louis, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1901-10-27
BY ALFRED
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6Ala UyIfD
WRITTEN FOR THE SUNDAY REPUBLIC.

Tho Old Cattleman's face offered full
hint of his amazement as he repeated in
the idiom OF his day and kind the sub.
stance of my interrogatory.
why, son." he continued. every long
horn who's ever cinched a Colorado saddle
or roped a steer is plumb aware OF loco
weed. Loco Is Mexicano for mad-crazy.
An cattle or mules or ponies or anything
else that makes n repast OF locoweed-which
as a rule they don't, bein' posted instructive
that loco that away is no bueno-goes
c~razy-what VEAL in the Southwest calls
locoed.
Whatever does this yere plant resem-
BILE? I amt no sharp on loco. but the
brand 1 encounters is green. bunchy. stiu.
an stands taller than the grass about 1t.
An 1t amt alters thar when looked for.
loco amt. It's one of these yere migratory
weeds: you'll see 1t growin' about the range
mebhy one or two seasons. an then it sort
o. pulls It's freight. Thar won't come no
more loco for years.
Mostly. as l observes prior. animals dis
dams loco an passes it up as bad medi-
cine. They're organized with a notion
ag'inst 1t. same as ag'inst rattlesnakes. An
as for them latter reptiles. you can take a
FlSdCItI = HcSS, IUdltU III lHe zap VI ClNill
cation, who amt seen nothin' more broad
enin' than the regular church service. with
now an then n revival, an yet he's born
KNOWN so much about rattlesnakes in all
their Nervousness that he'll bunch his back
an go soarin' way up yonder at the first
buzz.
Doc Poets informs me once when we
crosses up with locoweed over by the Cow
Springs that thar's two or three breeds Of
this malignant vegetable. He writes down
for me the scientific name of the sort We
gets ag'inst. Thar she is"
And the Old Cattleman produced from
some recess of a gigantic pocketbook a card
wherein the learned Poets had written
''Oxytropis LAMBERT"
That what Poets says loco Is" he re-
sumed, as I handed back the card. o
course. 1 don't so surgin' off p~ronouncin' no
sech words: shorely not in mixed company.
Some gent might take it personal and re-
sent 1t. But I likes TO pack 'em about. an
search 'em out now an then. jest to gaze
on an think what a dead cold scientist Doc
Poets is. He was shorely the limit: thar
never is that drug-sharp in the COW coun-
try In my day who's fit to pay for Peets's
whisky. Scientific an dedicated to a feath-
er aige, Poets is.
"You-all oughter heard him lay for one
of them cliff climbin'. ~bone-huntin' stone
electors who comes out from ashin ton
for the Comment. One of these yere deep
people strikes Wolfville on one Of them
r~ock-roundups he's maxim, an for awhile
it looks like he's goin' to split things wide
open an leave 'em on both sides OF the
road. He's that contrary about his learnin'
he won't use nothin' but words of four syl-
lables-words that run about eight to the
pound. He comes into the New York Store.
where Boggs an Tut an me is assembled.
an, you hear me. SON. that savant has US
waikiki In q circle In q minute.
TITS Peets who relieves US. Poets strolls
up an engages this person in q debate
touchin' mule-hoof hawgs. the COMMENT
sport maintainin' thar amt no seoh swine
with hoofs like a mule. because he's never
heard about EN-. an Poets takin' the opp
site view because he's done met an eat
'em a whole lot.
1.-The mere fact says Poets to this SOL
enlist, that you mavericks never knows OF
this mule-hoof hawg cannot Do taken as
proof he does not still root n roam the
land. Thar's more than one Of you Wash
in'ton shorthorns who's chiefly famed for
wha he's failed to know. TIT mule-hoof
hawE IL . fact. an the ignorance Of closet
naturalists shall not prevail ag'inst aim.
His back Is arched like q greyhound's. he's
about the thickness Of q bowie-knifs. he's
got hoofs like q mule. an sees his highest
developments in the wilds Of Arkansaw.'
But. speakin' OF locoweed. it's only oc-
c~aslonal that cattle or mules or broncos
partakes tharof. Which I might repeat for
the third time that, general, they eschews
It. But you'all never will know how wise
an animal II till he takes to munchin' loco.
Once he's plumb locoed, he Jest don't know
nothin':. then It sort O. dawns on you. BY
comparison like. how much he saveys prior.
The change shows plainest in mules. they
Is. the mule normal an before
he's l~ocoed-the wisest Of beasts. Wise did
I sayf A mulo is moro than wise; he's sa-
An thnr's q mighty sight Of dif-
To be simply wise. all one has to
II set 'roun an think wise things. an
nebby say EN-. IT'S only when . gent goes
round an does wise things you
calls him ~sagsciouA An mules DOES wis.
..shorei I admits It: I'm friendly to mules !
II the Southwest was to onbend in what
you'd call . intellectual competition-whites
b~arred-mules would stand at the head. Tho
list would come out, mules. coyotes, In
1uns, ponies. jack rabbits. sheep-herders an
pra'ry dogs the last bein' shorely imbecile.
yes, son. you can lean up ag'inst tho In
Of Q mule an 60 to sleep. Not
but what mules hasn't their uloosions. sech
a. white mares an similar reedic'lous In
d~ooencss, but them's weaknesses OF the
sperit rather than Of mind.
'sWhils mules don't nacherally 60 scoutin'
for loco, an commonly avoids said weed
found, II they ever does taste It once
never quits II al long as they lives.
It's like whisky to Higgins an Old Monte;
the appetite sort o goes into camp with
EN- an takes possession Of 'em. No. q 10
coed mule amt vicious nor voylent: it's
more like the treemons-he sees spectacles
that amt thar NONE. I've beheld a locoed
that a-wny. standin' alone on the
level plains in the sur. kickin' an pitchin'
beat a straight flush. He thinks he's sur
by Injuns or other h~ostiles; he's
crazy he don't know grass from trant'-
Ieers. An their mem'ry's wiped out; they
sorxets to eat an starves to death. That's
tho way they dies. onless some party who
rets worked up seein' EN- about takes a
an pumps q bullet into 'em.
.sYes, Poets says II a gent was to take to
Ioadin' up on loco. or deecoctions tharof.
,e,d become afflicted by bats. same as mules
m cattle. But no one, so far as any news