The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1901-09-29
Fun OF TIE MoRLp.

Gently contained the following curious
matrimonial 2d.
| / an d beautiful woman. NY abund-
ans sn5i.iaung hair envelopes me as
cloud Supple As n willow IS my waist
Soft and brilliant is my vissse as the
| satin Of the covers I ana endowed with
| wealth sufficient fo sauuter through life
! hand in hand with my beiored- Were
+ to meet = grac0us lord. kindly. intelligent.
/ vseil educated ana o. good taste, would
/ -luite u-vssif vlth ai-n Tor ..fe and later
share with him the pleasure OF 6elng laid
I 10 rest eternal ir q tuusa OF pink marble.
<
While a windmill Roof was being over
I hauled near Bescancon. the mlmuiiied
/ body OF = pigeon was fouLd. Attached
h q wing was a quiz containing q mis-
/ sive dated 1879. which read. Darling. al
well but starving. T.. =. c.. The pig
cor was most likely one q the homeTs
I released In Paris during the siese.
z
4 story * told of : judge who coulc
not control his temper. and 50 could nor
control other people. One day there was
I unusual disorder in the court room. and
Z CT last the Judge couid endure il rs
longer 1T is impossible 10 allow this
/ persistent contempt Of court 70 50 on,
! he exclaimed and Z shall be forced 10
so 70 the extreme length Of taking the
one step that VIII stop IL" There was
! long silence. then one IF the leading conn
sci rose. and with just q trace Of a smile
inquired: If sou please. your honor.
from what date VIII your resignation
take effect2"
gz
Judge William Xost OF GreenviIle. Ky.
who is candidate for The Kentucky
court Ct appeals. is one o. the bisgcst
men IN the state, physically. CT least, Ter
he stands feet. inches in his stockings.
| and has pair Of shoulders ike those OF
professional prizefghter. The judge is
| great joker ana When in New York re-
Gently a bootblack called out shine sir
The judge looked at him vacantly. pretend
ing 10 be deaf and dumb After several
| minutes OF sign language he understood.
| lie leaned against a building AID the boy
| went TO work Another bootblack ap-
peare1. and the one al work said.
-Yo1sc needn't stop, dis is al mine"
"shh Hell hear yer" whispered the
other.
I'm settin' five a shoe for desc
scows.' was the others reply in a loud
/ voice. The second boy looked so aston
/ ished at his friends holiness that the
latter laughed and said.
Say. yer chump. he's deaf and dumb.
See"
The other bay. who had been looking
with all his eyes az the giant hlurted cut
Z big ugly lookin' divl amt he2'
This was too much Tor The Judge ard
ne broke into laugh The boys looked
for an instant AZ him. and then fed
down the street. leaving the judge with
out one shoe polished so look FOR an
other boothlack 20 make equally pre-
sentable the other "scow.
x x z
An old colored woman was taking on
yesterday afternoon over the death 0f
/ her baby Is she was going from church
I 70 tho hack saws the Atchison Globe.
{ a white woman. who knew her, hap
pened 10 be passing. and said. svmpath-
/ etically. Which one of your children IS
dead Aunt Eliza? The one in the
hearse. moaned the negress."
<
/ 4 member OF congress told the story
i which he had srom hrst source, Of bow
! Mr.. Roosevelt. just hefcre The war with
Spain was declared. once burst tcnpestu-
i ously into the cabinet room during a cab
/ met meeting
Here comes Roosevelt" said President
I Mckinley. Let's see what De has 10 say.
+ What would you advise he continued.
addressing Mr.. Roosevelt "as 70 the &C.
ton OF the United States in connection
with the Cervera's nect2"
Setting his teeth firmly together. Nr
/ Roosevelt replied
with all due Difference 70 you. Mr..
/ President since voc ask me for my honest
opinion. 7 VIII say that my advice IS q
1 meet Cervera's feeet st IN Caruaries and
/ sink every d. ship Of the feet"
But that would be an act OF war re-
/ piled President Mckinley.
Certainly IL would. Mr President" sad
/ Mr.. Roosevelt, but ] have noticed in
studying history that &c IS ,he nation
which gets Ia The drst blow that usually
/ F..f fra fra Ia
/ first blow"
ZEE
A woman living N Walnut street. near
/ Broad IN Philadelphia has noted WIEN
/ growing sorrow a bright faced hoy ~ zen
! years smoking cigarettes ln the vicinity
/ OF her home. See how thin sou are.
! she remarked 20 the youngster one day
I you WIN not live long. and the naughty
/ cigarettes viii be 10 blame The lad
I replied. My brother was O good boy;
J he never smoked. and he died But he
I went away sad. for the reflection n his
\ size worried him. Next day be returned
4 bringing along a sturaHy built lad ~ his
own age. HE smokes twice IS many as
/ ne" was the little fellow proud remark
| The kind hearted woman IS somewhat dis
/ Outraged on the subject ~ reforming
/ Young America
ggg
/ Robert Lowe afterward Lord Shfr-
/ brock. once saw deaf member of pariia-
ment trying his best 20 catch with his
car trumpet the words of an extremely
1uu speech Just look az that foolish
man." said Lowe. throwing away his
natural advantage"
zg
The BuNaio News tells story % 4
year-old girl who was spending q night
I away from home. Al Bedtime she knelt
AT her hostess knees 20 say prayers cx-
pecting the usual promplinE. Binding
Mrs. y unable 20 help her out SIRE cone
cluded thus Please. God. 'scise ne. 7
can't remember uly prayers. ard = n stay
ing with q lady chat don't know any
In speaking ~ the ferrors ~ The SiaF
tongue. Cpie Read remarked that drug.
cist ia tae heart ~ the Rusisan colony
ia Chicago recently had p telephone ir-
strumeut Installed Frs his place for sac
accou uloiafi0H ~ nae patrons. TIE uzia-
utrs IRE arst usfr - tA1s pfe1ua orEzz -
talk Russian l-te The receiver. zAse Htre
kirkcd Into suaI knots lsse tens
twisted string They couldn't ~ thlle
te meet the culf rEerrr lat8 after ono ~
THE teleTl91e lnemsn w1o na1 cree az
tempted 90 30 a15rslc ~ mrrE ir e Eas-
rfsu settlement I1 Il1geseta. Errsersa
TIE efanoth. Insulated copper efrrsl uifh
trs orfsrarv haze wire Tr1f aTzed
medium proved perfect means ~ trans +
mission Ter Euesn rreech
u IS said thaf ahtr tte Grit -kiress +
caus q CaHfrs the fr rfre
very cart9ra afeaf tfem ste nrrss
among s-me ~ facr - Ntst
ne rt~zHEera might hH u. aa1