The National tribune., 1901-11-28

SI:lHN pension. lie has been shooting az
the bullseye with poor luck. | helped
him ont in the last contest. We divided
the prize between Us. The 50 deal 10
great. We got $40 worth OF books and 40
guesScs. And one OF the 40 guesses brought
rs So.
Comrade W. H. Reagan, Co. G., 9th
Tenn. Cav. Of Byrdstown, Tenn. sent his
guesseS, and addresses comrades generally
as follows: Boys, il anybody fires the old
proverb at you-'a fool and his money Is
soon parted, just fire the other one back
"a fool for luck. We are not fools in
making these gueSses For goodness sake,
don't we get double our moneys worth in
books and reading matter:"
Ed. Dribune: Iss dat contest vair?
Sometimes ! dink it iSS and sometimes /
dink it issent. Dere ole soldiers all say
it iss yair, bud dey often bulled de eyes
ofer my wool ven | vas a sudlers CLERK in
dat seeyil war; VIII you sell me a sheep
guess, for IL cents, unit sent de paper
dree munts unit trow in de story OF An
dersonyille: bieaSe rebly promptly unit
enclose ? cents postage to rebay me de
COST OF dis ledder.'
Comrade Andrew Cotton. of Pollock,
Mo, writes 4 laugh TO myself when I
think Of the advertisement that win be apt
to appear in your paper later in the sea-
sop. something like this: For Saie-A
bull. with one eye: cost the owner $4,000,
No reasonable offer refused. National
Tribune, Washington, d. c."
\ comrade writes: I'm going for my
mail next week afoot. IL | should be
a-horsehack, and got g letter with a check
in it. il would knock me right out Of tho
saddle"
Another eomrade writes: 'Tn any fu-
ture contests / hope you viii hang a
bOoby prize to the ;nimal's tail, of the
value OF about one cent, which viii give
my luck fair show
Comrade Joseph Meyer, of Miami, Fla,
sent his guesses and wrote: Il want a
prime piece of sirloin. but If / must take
tail, 'beSser Elm laus i'm crout as garnix,
which is Pennsylvania Dutch for the fol-
lowing beautiful sentiment: Better bug
in the boiled dinner than no meat at all.'
Comrade JAS. Kenrick, of Bringhurst.
Ind, sends his guesses with the follow
ing couplet:
My nerves are rather jerly.
SO I'm aiming at the turkey
Albert Earhart, Of Charlton, Mo-. win
ner OF the 14th prize, in the February
contest. explains his plan of Embarrassing:
in soliciting subscribers | agreed 10 df-
vide any prize that the club might win
So, each subscriber got back $625 for the
81 he invested, besides getting the paper
for n year
Comrade Noah Thomas, London, o.,
winner 18th prize, TepOrts After the
war was Auditor of Madison County foR
several consecutive terms. When Charles
Foster was Governor he sent me to the
Ohio Penitcntiary for a term of four
years, but when j. Il. Foraker became
Governor he took me out and sent me to
the Ohio Soldiers and Sailors Orphan
Home, at Xenia, o. Perhaps | should
add that while in the Penitentiary | was
Warden and while at the Home | was
Superintendent"
Sylvester Steiner. of Greensburg, Pa,
writes: The fun Is worth ten times the
cost. II don't hit him this time III
come on to Washington and fling him over
the barn by the tail. That will be no easy
job, either. if his weight corresponds at
all with his yalue-S10,00O."
Comrade VI. A. Cleveland, of Paines-
VILE o.. writes:
MY guessing reminds me of the for
getful man who could not remember
whether he weighed 1863 pounds or 961.
II some of my figures could be reversed
in like manner they would stand more Of
a chance"
Comrade Charles Bank. Co. II. 1st o.
Y. l., of Topeka. kan.. sent 40 guesseS
and wrote Send me the $4,000 in in
stallments. Being subject to heart disease,
would not like TO have it all come at
once. | don't want to leave my wife with
a oHe-eyed bun on her hands"
Comrade A. J. Nicholson, of Beaverton,
Ala. sends his guesses with these few re.
marks:
Again 1 FIRE my guessing gun,
And even though | fail
To hit his bullship in the eye,
l hope to bob his tall
Comrade E. W. Pritchett, Co. B, 49th
Mo. Inf of Martinsburg, Mo-, winner OF
he jIth prize, writes: Not only did
win in the guessing contest, but | was
awarded 160 acres of fine land in Okla
loma. Seems as if things are, at last,
coming my way, and that l can draw
TO a sh0estring and get lanyard.
Comrade L. Johnson. Of Kearney, Neb.,
writes that he is pretty mad that no Ne
DraSkan was smart enough to get a prize
IN the last contest, but that he is going to
try it again, and humorously adds that it
would be to our advantage for him to
win, because such good luck would scare
ne TO death and you would never have to
gay it
Comrade Joseph Dissler, of the Sol
liers' Home, Quincy, H., won, in spite
If little faith. \ friend in the Home
'arries on his correspondence. Age and
nfirmity have. perhaps made writing a
lifticult job for him. This friend gives
is a little additional information that is
% breezy that we cannot withhold it,
llthough part of the joke seems to be on
Is The friend writes; Jos. Dissler
;ave me 81 to send to you for a years
y few days after | sent
n guesses in his name. When | told
lin of it. he said: oh. that is q hum
,ugr But when You sent him 5000, he
wanted to know how l did it. and he Of
cred me ST.
Some Oyer-gcnerOuS comrades viii laugh
t the wrong place in the above quotation.
Jomrade Dissler has 4 perfect right to
ame the size of the reward for his friend,
nd we hope and believe thar he is a care
ul man, and that this $500 will last
Dng time in supplying him with the COM
orts of life. We like to see our old COM
AIDES a little close" For the most part
heir incomes are small and they cannot
fferd to waste any of IL. The laugh
ONES in at his belief that the whole busi-
ess was Il humbug He must have been
when he opened the letter
nd found he had won $500.
Mrs. l. ". Sharpe. New Mildred, Conn.,,
II old subscriber, writes: Il enjoy all
Ne reading in The National Tribune, but