Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1901-12-06

pankS on Doln SIDES. S.'-MOonSnlne
Sarah--She's worth "A million, and
| just the right age for you. Jerry-Any
girl worth million is the right age
for me-
Mistress Ito servanD-Be careful not
to spin any soup on the ladies' laps.
Biddy. new in seryiee)-Yes, mum; .
where shall | spill it?
Papa, how do people In the weather
bureau find out what kind of weather
we are going to haver Il didn't know
that they did, my son."
"Is your son Jack going back to col.
| lege? mo. The college president
seems to agree with Mr.. Schwab about
Its being "A waste of time."-Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
The detachable sort: Miss Flum-
merry has such beautiful HART Why,
she can sit on it, How careless of
her to leave 1t lying around on chairs"
cleveland Plain Dealer.
Back Again: ''Hullo, old boy, haven't
Ing nowT "I'm back at the old stamp
ing ground" "Eh Where's that?"
"Postofiice. Cleveland Plain Dealer,
/ No Deferred Payments: rs your
daughter learning to play by note?"
Certainly not" answered Mrs. Cum
rox, little Indignantly; 1--WE pay cash
for every lesson. The ideaw-Wash
ington Star.
| Fred-I see the Van Billion girl has
adopted the English fashion of wear
ing sandals. Ned Qhe rejected)-Yes;
It's the old Roman custom. and proba-
bly, takes her back to her happy child,
hood.-Cleveland Spectator.
Isn't he philosophicalr "Wcll, l
should say sol When the lightning
struck his house, he sat perfectly quiet.
and afterward said he was glad it hap
pened, as he'd been thinking some time
of getting his hair snged Boston
Home Journal.
Farmer Jones q n. m.)--Clear out, we
varmlnt, or Ill shoot ye! Josh Med
ders desperately then! l come :
here to elope with your darter Sal, and.
by gum, I'm going to! Farmer Jones
| y
come to serenade her.-Puck. -
( Mr.. Gooph--I tell you, Blithersby's
wife Is jewel. Mr.. Whoop-Is that
so? Mr.. Gooph-I should say SO. Why,
he went fishing yesterday. and came
home with an empty jug, can Of sal
mon and two salt mackerel, and she
| complimented him on his luck.
In the future: "Do yez keep an as
sistant to the cook? ?" "Yes." "And
do the assistant have helper?" "She
I has," "And have yez a kitchen-maid
to clane up after the assistants help
erT' 1--WE have" "Wcll, I'll give yez
wakes trial."-Brooklyn Life
Ruling passion strong in death: 81
saw Mrs. X. going into an auction sale
last Monday. Isn't her craze for bar
gains extraordinary? "Yes, indeed.
I believe she could die happy if she
knew she would be laid out on a bar
gain counter and buried as remnant"
Town aud Country.
"Does Miss Whiupperly ever say
anything about me?' asked Gazlett,
who wanted to find out where he stood.
"Well yes" answered Goblet, "she
asked me to-day where you have been
keeping yourself. She said you hadn't
called on her for the last two or three
minutes. Indianapolis Sun.
Might have been worse; Poor b'ye~ !
( exclaimed O'Hara, condoling with Cas-
sidy, whd had been injured by blast;
"'tis tough luck teh hay yet hand
blowed off," "Och! Faith, 1t might
ave bin worse" replied Cassidy; sup
pose Ord had me weeks wage in it at
the toime."- Philadelphia Press.
Ground plan completed: Naggus Dit
erary editor)-How is your new society
novel getting en-, Borus? Borus (strug-
Cling author)-Splendidly I've got the
| French phrases I'm going to use In the
story all selected. There's nothing to
do now but to fill in the English and
divide it into chapters. Chicago Trib-
une. aos a. 1l
Harry and Charlie, aged and re,
spectively, have just been seated at
the nursery table for dinner. Harry
sees there Is but one orange on the ia q
BILE and Immediately sets up wall
that brings his mother to the scene
"Why, Harry, what are you crying
| forr' she asked. Because there amt
any orange for Charlie .sfs-s n
Revivalist-Is it possible that you
dance? Fair Sinner--Oh, yes, often.
Revivalist Now, tell me, honestly and
fairly, don't you think the tendency Of
Ldancing is toward sin? Fair Sinner-I
must confess that sometimes while
dancing have very wicked thoughts.
Revivalist-Aha! l feared so. When
is 1t that you have wicked thougAts2'
Fair Sinner When my partnss-stepsq
| on my toes,-New York Weekly. = = I.
''".