The Providence news. (Providence [R.I.]) 1891-1906, 1901-09-05
Chat Abom
People.

see that Rev Dr. Taunce. presi-
dent of Brown University, preached
an eloquent sermon on The Answer
TO Pessimism." before the six East
crn District congregation y uniting
In summer services IN 81 Johns NJ
Il. church IN Brooklyn. sunday last.
In the course OF his remarks he
quoted the saying The sovereign
source OF melanchola is repletion"
and logically added that the quickest
way 20 make any man weary OF life
is TO give him all his hearts desire.
The struggle for the unattslned Is the
secret OF JOY.
Have you ever noticed that the pes
simism of our modern life" conclud-
ed, never comes from poverty and de-
privation, but always from abundance
and from culture and from luxury? Ia
the slums OF the great cities YOU new
er hnd pessimists, you never lind men
despair OF life. very rarely, at least.
do YOU ind them among the poorest
and most wretched OF our cities But
you find the professed pessimists
among those who have had poured
upon them everything the world can
offer. and then realize that the whole
need. IL is not IN what can be poured
into a mans. life that can give him
peace and gladuess and victory over
time and death. IL Is la the spirit we
carry Within the spirit In league with
God, that knows the Father OF spirits
is our Father, and that neither life nor
death can separate us from Him.
One way of getting ahead OF the tel
ephone girl and hoodwinking others
whose business II is not
A certain grocery delivery clerk has
number OF country routes and IL Is
his custom 10 execute small commits
sions forg the housewives. Sometimes
they give him their orders In person
sometimes they telephone TO the store
10 have Bill bring the desired articles.
and "Bul" obligingly goes out and
does the extra shopping. A few days
ago Bill got the grand laugh from the
office when he was told that Mrs
wanted Bill to bring her two yards OF
muslin" Bill, took the chatting with
extreme good nature Why shouldn't
he? Bill hadn't any shopping 10 do
among the dry goods stores That was
a secret code message. For two yards
OF muslin, please read two racks of
beer.
Ye gods! what a stencil that was
that arose from the upper river and
filled the air chock-a- block, yesterday.
Some careless person. chose the food
tide TO dump into the river "A lot OF
rancid fish oil. OF the strongest imagi-
nable rotten cod-lyer variety. The
oil was spread over the surface. from
the Crawford street 10 the Market
square bridges and when the tide
Ia laff hs NIL nj
wash-boards to tester.
1t was dirty, contemplate trick
and scores of people were made sick
TO 'heir stomachs as a result of IL.
The man responsible for this particu-
lar pollution ought TO be ferreted out
. and prosecuted.
.,One is not apt to think that bodily
health affects the pronunciation of
medern ..nglish. But SO IL does, as the
following incident about Taunton
folks" proves.
Anyone who has ever visited that
town in April or May knows how pro-
lifcally the inhabitants are fed upon
buckles. At this season they pro-
nounce the name OF their town"Tawn-
ton"
But along I'm December OF the same
year when the supply OF salted buckles
is exhausted, the natives Will reply,
when asked what is the name OF the
city, in a shrill voice: ''Tanton."
Another story about a Taunton fish,
erman is that when he once tried To
pull his shirt of over his head he
found that he could not do so. Inyes-
tigation showed he had eaten so many
honey fish that the bonesswere stick
ing out all over his body and holding
the shirt back!
The best yarn told about Taunton
folks" is the one of how a very de-
vout congregation was aroused from
Sunday worship TO go afishing. II was
the custom TO leave somebody to
watch the shore and give warning
when the buckles were seen coming
In.
One Sunday morning the congrega-
tion at church was aroused by some
body's coming TO the church door and
CRYING out Buckles comm =" In
stantIy, the entire body arose from
their seats and started for the shore,
Hold on" cried out the parson.
wait. Let's all set a fair start.
Ihe Gossip.