davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15

tinental Europe Large numbers of
American spectacles are sold In Great
Britain. | guess you would find that
shipments of such goods from here to
England are made as often as weekly.
imagine that there are now worn in
England and in Scotland more spec
tacles of American than any other
manufacture. New York Sun
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15
Statistics of Suicide.

In a paper printed in the American
Journal of insanity. G. Styles presents
statistics regarding9th the occurrence OF
suicides. Forty years ago 1t was
shown that only out of 10000 per
sons rated as paupers died by their
own hands, while coachmen or
other servants, 8 bankers or other pro
fessional men, nearly soldiers, Z
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15

Mamma-Ethel. | must really forbid
you touching that lobster-you know
1t does not agree with you.
Ethel Cresignedly)-Very well, NAM
ma, but it does seem as IL everything
In this world that is nice is either
wicked or lndigestibe.- Life
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15
short engagements.

Little Boy-EIow soon are you and
Sis goln' to be married?
Accepted Suitor-She has not named
the day yet. | hope she does not be
lleve in long engagements.
Little Boy-She doesn't. | know
cause all her engagements have been
short. Tit Bits.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15
Trunk WreatIIn~.

Lady-Why don't the railroads have
mechanical appliances for loading and
unloading trunks?
Depot Master-Well. you see, mad.
am, lifting the trunks into the cars
doesn't hurt anything but the men and
throwing them out doesn't hurt any
thing but the trunks.-New York
Weekly.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15
Antidote for Onions,

81 should think you would be afraid
to eat onions in the middle of the day."
said the blonde typewriter to the bru
nette when they met at dinner.
I'm not bit" replied the dark one;
you see, our office is on the thirty
sixth foor and when go up in that
elevator 1t takes my breath away
YOnkers Statesman.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15
Not Plumn Enough.

1ess-Miss Scrawney says she just
hates to 60 to the opera.
Jess Yes but what she means is that
she can't bare" to go to the opera.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15

Mr. Cripps-Can you induce the cook
to have one of her friends come and
take dinner with her tonight?
Mrs. Cripps-The idea! What for?
Mr. Cripps-I expect to bring Jones
and Smith home with me, and Id like
to have nice dinner for them.-Phila-
delphia Record.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15

The Palmist-This line in your hand
indicates that you have a very brilliant
future ahead of YOU
Simkins-Is that so?
The Palmist-Yes, but this other line
indicates that you are too slow to ever
catch up with it.-Chicago News.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15

Mrs. Poppers-Oh, John, you must
raise side whiskers.
Mr.. POppers-What? You've often
told me you hated such things.
Mrs. Poppers-I want you to raise
nice long ones like Mr.. Markley's. He
called to-day, and baby enjoyed pull
Ing his whiskers so much. 1t was too
cute for anything. Philadelphia Press.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15

Wife (angrily)- Seems to me that we
have been married so long that | can't
even remember when or where we first
met.
Husband (quietly)-I can. 1t was at
dinner party and there were thirteeA
at the table.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15

Scene: Chlldren's party punch and
Judy show going). Tom discovered by
his hostess papa in tears.
Hostess Papa-Afraid Tom? Cheer
up old man. they're only dolls.
Poor, Frightened Tommy-They
won't be dolls when dream of them
tO-nght.-Life.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15

Willie-Pa, what's fixed star?
Pa formerly an actor)-A fixed star
| suppose, is one who gets his salary
regularly. Philadelphia Press.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15
Operated Upon.

Briggs hear you have been Oper-
ating in Wall street.
Grlggs-A great mistake. have been
operated upon. Harper's Bazaar.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15
Room by nnre d..

"Have you done anything to boom
your town.
"Wal, | reckon! Held tew lndigna-
ton meetin's tew pertest agtn the
smoke cer-Detroit Journal.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15

FOrtieth Friend (since breakfasb-Ry
Jove. old fellow, you've got a fearful
cold, What are you taking for it?
Sufferer Advice. - New
York Weekly.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15
. Cant,on- Answer.

"Where is JosiarY asked Mrs. Corn
tOssel uneasily.
Well" answered her husband. as he
proceeded to fill his pipe, 81 won't say
fur certain. If the Ice is as strong as
he thinks it is, he's gone skatin. an If
1t amt, he's gone swimmin. Boston
Transcript.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15

.w cnmnsr, he crled

"More new gowns!' he cried.
"Why, yes" she answered, sweetly.
"All of mine are last century styles
Philadelphia North American.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15

"Old Crouch went to the masquerade
the other night disguised as Il bear"
Ibid any one recognize himt"
Nobody but his wife."-lndianapolis
Press.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15

"Is the boss in?' asked the stranger,
entering the drug store.
NO" replied the absent-minded
clerk. but we have something just as
good. d."-Yonkers Statesman.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15

Hicks-Do you believe that it is un
lucky 10 postpone wedding?
Wicks-Yes, when the young man
needs money, and the girl is rich.-
Somerville Journal.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15
Costly Hailstorms In Franoa

The annual loss to France caused by
the ravages of hailstorms is said to
amount to about 100000 francs
From 1873 to 1895 the figures varied
from 4000O.000 to l34.OOO.OO0 francs
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15
The Real Thing.

The divine right of kings isn't in it
with the right of the married daughter
who comes home for the first time to
show off her baby to her parents
Atchison Globe.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15
In Theatric Por'auc a..

Amateur-What does it mean in the
atric circles when they say the ghost
walksY
Veteran Actor-It means that the
rest of us don't have to.--Detroit Free
Press
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15
HI. Hon..

Sea Captain-There is no hope! The
ship is doomed! In an hour we will all
be dead!
Seasick Passenger-Thank heaven!
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15
Italians As cotton picker.

In the south the Italians are found
to be good cotton pickers. They are
quick and have nimble fingers.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15
snnnnhoIders.

Here's a girl" remarked the query
editor. "who writes to know what Is
the popular spoonholder this season "
Evidently" replied the snake editor,
"she's never had any beaux.'
"WhyT
Because If she had she'd know that
the most popular one is the parlor
sofa. Philadelphia Press.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15
Easily Answered.

Teacher-Why should all good little
boys like Washington's birthday?
Chorus of Five-Cause they amt no
school that day!
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15
A Snre Thing.

He-Wasn't that you on the piazza
last night?
She-No.
Then wonder who in the world /
kissedg"
You can probably tell by going there
tonight at the same timew-Life.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15

"Oh! my poor woman! My heart
bleeds for one in your condition.
Thanks, sor; Oi was thinkin' the
same of the likes of your
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15


About three years ago II was noticed
that Rolla White had begun to spark
Jane Shotwell the pretty brunette
daughter Of Jim Shotwell. Time went
by and other boys did not cease to call,
but Jane seemed to prefer sitting out
on the little porch with Rolla, resting
easily against the railing and talking
with him, to receiving the attention Of
other sultors who were more to her
fathers liking. The father banshed
Rolla from the house. and often the girl
would slip out from the house, meet the
boy in the big road" just where the
turn cut off the view from the house
and stroll away over the hills. planning
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15

He lin his wrath-When married
you had no idea what fool you
were.
She tin her equanlmity)-The fact
that | was willing to marry you should
have removed all doubts on that point.
Boston Transcript
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15
cute Tot 4

Ethel--Count Spaghetti seems to lead
a monotonous life.
Gladys-Yes; little change would
do him good.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15
The Hal OF EIoa nence.

He-OL. yes; he's eloquent. But |
can't say | admired the whole of his
speech.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15

There has broken out In Corbin. KY,
a real oldfashioned feud. One with love
as a beginning, and hate, murder and
death as an ending. In the very begin
ming of it-the first battle-two men
and a woman have been killed, one
house has been blown up with dyna-
mite another riddled with bullets. and
several people are in Jail charged with
murder. 1t Is feud which has every
prospect of long life and is marked with
all the wild passions and semisayagery
which have SO long characterized the
mountalneers of Kentucky.
The story of the love of Rolla White
for Jane Shotwell would read much as
other love affairs where the father Of
the girl objected. were 1t not for the
fact of the peculiar temperament of the
mountain people and their custom,
from time immemOral, of taking the
law into their own hands and them
selves demanding and taking ian eye
for an eye and tooth for tooth"
OLA sNhls hSO int W hlAcs hlbNtu W
Corbin from their Virginia home. There
were the three sons two daughters, and
the aged mother. The boys--Blll. Roach
and Rolla-established a restaurant and
store in one part of the town and a
hotel In the other. They lived as peace
full citizens until the present tragedy.
The Shotwells have been residents Of
Corbin for about the same length Of
time. Their family home is at Rock
hold, about ten miles away. The father,
James Shotwell, set up -four and saw
mill on his arrival in Corbin, John
ShOtwell and the other boys aided
their father In the milling bust
ness. The Shotwells did not lead
the same quiet life as the Whites
and were frequently in shooting
affairs. In October, 1897, the Shot
we'll boys figured in street fight in
which Police Judge Moffett was killed
and W. s. Holland badly wounded
Holland was the man who had quar-
relied with the Shotwell boys, and they
ran him into building and riddled him
with bullets. Judge Moffett was killed
by a shot from within the house. Last
February they figured in another riot
In which Deputy Marshal Henry Hart
ford was killed.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15

She-No, his mouth isn't pretty, but
then it's partially hidden by his mus
tache.- Philadelphia Press.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1901-03-15

stimulants seldom hurt a man--if he
leaves them alone. 20
Wadsworth semi-weekly dispatch. [volume] (Wadsworth, Nev.) 1899-1904, 1901-03-05
COURTS LEARN
from THE PRESS.

the Bench learn from the press> can learn think
the history constantly teaches the lesson that the
and the sue involved the promugaon fnda
principles the line of moral right their application human
tentons and to all contentious of Government and men,
newspapers and principle will stand for
anence candor serespe And the Judges who
day Judges all time point the distinction per-
sonify the difference
The decisions opinions which have made Nations,
ward or which worlds wealth political Sc
outy have Judges touch with the world we'll
library and sympathetic well saturated with was
greatly impressed with the statement that lately attributed
Marshall say this the decision
Brother please discover the authorities fit it, That
way great editorials the authorities for them always
the logic and the conscience OF an enlightened
Cullen
Wadsworth semi-weekly dispatch. [volume] (Wadsworth, Nev.) 1899-1904, 1901-03-05
Ghosts.

Alonzo Dodge says good or bad
angels come to his house and annoy
him every night. They come right
through the roof and then make an un
bearable racket in his room and in the
cellar. He throws iron balls the size
of grape shot at them but the balls 90
through them and they don't care.
He's going to get gun and try that
He can't see them but says Constable
Golding knows who they are and stands
In with them.
Wadsworth semi-weekly dispatch. [volume] (Wadsworth, Nev.) 1899-1904, 1901-03-05

would about dubbed idiots and nacwhen suggest that
they would burn their properties for the Your constituents
thieves they ask policies than the values permit such
policies to be written and they would be oony burn their 70
per valuation they asonss
Eks all the please but conne choice ephets
them while The morning together harmony sing they'll let
From that "he people the unqualified
demand repeal that nquou power
desoya Man and Nature politicians
The representatives of the people must not themselves above the people
and the peoples wants. for
THE =, Heaven ssSa expedite the sa
Are these companies these meou robbers the rghtu
heirs Of the Caesars dictate the representatives of State
legislation they enach You getting Van
the companies practced tried bribery
about in that assinlne style but yank em
There's little doubt Marcenus will go into exile.
The have withdrawn from the
doing the today and policies hourly expiring
holders staying late because they cannot Sleep
for you, Colonel, but it's hell on hem
The statesmen who the will the people the sweep
rubbish by and by will make the Of
oblivion.
everything requisite compensation
proposed theories work benefits and your assertions when lined
You dreamer clothed
harm. You egost tell the people they don't what
all In thinking spells
O recalled lines about statesman
Wasins wy yns ione aneu apsla SO ps nav@, 20 nn aot
His seat grown harder ashis brain grew soft
h ad left '1l .1s nl ,ha a,' 6 s a ns ss AWAY r a.
u1dene that have already wrought injury
affected BY security they comprise
struggling with the soil pioneers grown
the rich You destroyed
who have their LIES savings secured by insurance. and opportunity
savings the toll years You
down ousandfod than built You have
bowels of rs the people of the
by calling them fools The remedy needed
lies provision for inspection of the risk and formal
credited officials of fire insurance companies.
might
Wadsworth semi-weekly dispatch. [volume] (Wadsworth, Nev.) 1899-1904, 1901-03-05
A Warning

Complaint is made of boys shooting
firearms within town limits. A rifle ball
came near hitting A. N. Babcock while
he was in his house. There is a law
against such shooting and heavy pen
atty. The first boy caught at the
practice will be arrested.
Wadsworth semi-weekly dispatch. [volume] (Wadsworth, Nev.) 1899-1904, 1901-03-05
Carson City March 2, 1901.

whoto dyou
Hadnoth better in dtodo
Could nos reased
duode og a
dand dbald,o o.
Stir sion Ind
To hide efromhu ey
There has values for the
years carefully studied the relations
that doing business
the State paid property insured Of de-
probation property values after acceptance of premium
ghdecisvs shour n o
fire than other us
admirable
try TO bambooze people damphoo Colonel
You do not know that agents famae themselves with the
they take and we guarantee will speak the local
And the statement that $500
policy the insurance companies $l748 mond
frivolous than the Hon. abolish conferees
Bob would do mighty good, you a cruel wrong
Persons in Nevada who cannot their business
known the desire and your proposition is not
repealed will not be known as only Gous Vanderbs will here
do business
Wadsworth semi-weekly dispatch. [volume] (Wadsworth, Nev.) 1899-1904, 1901-03-05
Rebekahs Notice.

There will be special meeting of
the Queen Esther Rebekah Lodge
Wednesday evening, All members
will please make an effort to be pres
ent. By order of the Noble Grand.
Wadsworth semi-weekly dispatch. [volume] (Wadsworth, Nev.) 1899-1904, 1901-03-05
TWO VIEWS or
THE HNSURANCEI.AW

EDITOR DsrATcH-Unde the head obnoxious Legislation your
valuable late presents signed by Mr. Kenhans
relating to the fire insurance law
Whatever Mr. K knows about other up discussion he
certainly knows nothing about the fire medicine his
warrant for the editor permitting publication
ought to be enforced by statutory
Having given several years of careful study relatively
tha insurer and insured the question for the policy
heroican meet the stated undertaking of the
when the
deduction for depreciation value made after receiving
greater than they parties
man, upon equal footinga
presumed required percentages furnish
n me the capital fire companies
would embark nit2
agents supposed pro-
per their respective communities and issuing policies consider
surroundings and chances depreciation the risk that should be
Then why do they issue policy $8oowh loss
they only intend $l748 pleasantly speaking and moth
ing than for the sky high commissions always handy this country
the law there must be total loss fire before the
the recipient Of the whole number dollars good faith paid his
money insured for and this be buildings other and
not personal property movable effects.
law the agent the property for such that
the company against cendasm
be askedp
companies the right call policies time
and right perhaps should
safety of adjoining property whether insured or not
companies for their protection
compelled establishing honest compact between the
pany the insured.
money surrounded with buildings insured under the old
Of fire ncenday nehbor by the law
there such eae sae and the community
this the enacted
"Snce the first morning stars together in harmony sang
Humboldt delegation
threats Of political death exile
Are these insurance companies these iperous robbers the gu heirs
the dictate the representatives Of sovereign State the %
they enacta and this law remains will cheery
More joy exied Marcelus feels
Than Caesar with senate at his heels
withdrawing the
and you will get sleep enough.
powerful sweep the onward the There
money this State that paid fire companies the appetite
if not his neghbor will make terms to gather n
imagine between thinking spells that there will be exodus
of fire companies from Nevada equal that Of the sraees when
skip contemplate the sdehe invasion
companies lou then watch the benefits this law
Very respectfully. E. P HARDEsrY.
Author of the law
Mnrcho
Wadsworth semi-weekly dispatch. [volume] (Wadsworth, Nev.) 1899-1904, 1901-03-05
Church Services.

Morning services at | | A. NJ. Even
ing services at 7:3o P M. Sunday
School at2 P. M. Lenten services
Friday at a P. M.
Wadsworth semi-weekly dispatch. [volume] (Wadsworth, Nev.) 1899-1904, 1901-03-05
DR.. H. B. MCDONALD.
Dentist.

Office in DISPATCH Building.
Beautiful Gold Bridges and
Crowns; Gold and Silver Filings, etc
| guarantee my work to
be perfect in every particular.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1901-12-26
Bond WOOIrich.

Married, in the city of Dodgeville,
on Wednesday evening, Dec. Is, at
the residence of Mr.. and Mrs. George
WooIrich, parents of the bride, Mr..
J ohm Fl. Bond, of the town of Valid
wick, and Miss Emma WOolrich. The
ceremony was performed by Rev. w.
J. c. Bond, of Boscobel, uncle of the
groom. Miss Eva Woolrich was
bridesmaid and Mr.. Charles Bond
was best man. An elegant and sump-
tuous wedding feast was served.
There were many useful and beautiful
presents. About fifty guests were
present. Both bride and groom are
we'll and favorably known, and they
have the congratulations and well
wishes of a host of friends.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1901-12-26
Patterns From Samoa.

Manufacturers Of figured linens and
cloths frequently get their ideas for
new patterns from unexpected sources.
One such manufacturer happened to
be discussing the handiwork of Sa-
moan native women with an American
woman who lived in Samoa for several
years, when she spoke of the original
designs that were worked into some of
the rugs and mats which the natives
made.
The manufacturer showed great IN
terest IN what she said and asked to
see a sample of this work. An excel
lent sample of Samoan cloth made
from the bark of the mulberry tree
was shown. Its design suggested that
Of blankets made by the Indians in the
southwest, but it was clearly original
and very effective.
The manufacturer proposes to repro
duce it in linen. If the native woman
who made this particular piece of
cloth should by any chance ever hap
pen to see the linen reproduction Of it,
she would probably be very much puz-
zled at the honor done to her handi-
work.-New York Sun.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1901-12-26
Christmas at St. PauIs CathoIic
Church

st. PauPs Catholic church was
thronged with devout worshipers on
CHRISTMAS day to offer up their pray
ers of thanks and gratitude on the
feast of the Nativity. The interior
OF the church was very neatly decor
ated, suggestive of the occasion, the
sanctuary especially attracting at
tentlon. On either side of the sauct-
uary railing were large evergreen
trees, from their tops to the center of
the ceiling, above and across over the
tabernacle, deep, graceful loops of
evergreen were suspended American
beauties, tuchias, chrysauthenums and
other flowers were lastly arranged on
either side of the altar From the
apex OF the tabernacle a silver star in
a golden wreath shone brightly, glist-
enlng In the light of many burning
tapers. A full choir, under the charge
OF Miss Gertie Weidenfeller, assisted
by j. w. Anderson at the organ and
Miss Mary Shaw on the violin. sang
very fine and difficult mass, we'll de-
serving the praise it received. After
the conservation Miss Shaw in her
lnlmltable manner played violin
solo, which filled the church with soft
and sweetly harmonious strains.
Father O'keefe preached an appro-
PIRATE sermon from the text: 81 Being
You Tidings of Great JOY, Today is
Born to You a Saviour" After the
bendection the congregation dispersed
impressed with the solemnity of the
feast, and, no doubt, resolving to
glorify God by their lives. and be-
come worthy of that peace, promised
to men on earth, of good will.
Misses Mary Healy aud Sarah Com
naughton and Mrs. Judge McIlhon
are to be congratulated and thanked
for their very neat and artistic
decoration of the church.
Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1901-12-26
ERSONAI s

Sir John Ramsden, the richest of all
English baronets. has an income es-
timated at $3.50, 900 a year.
DR.. S. \. Martin has resigned the
presidency of Wilson college, in
Chamberburg, Pa, desiring to be re-
ieved from the arduous duties Of the
position.
1t is reported that pierre Lott" the
writer, otherwise Captain Niaud Of
the French navy, is seriously i'll at
Chifu, where he has been on naval
duty.
Anton Dvorak has been accorded a
rare distinction by the emperor Of Aus
tria. He is the first musical composer
who has been made a member of the
Austrian house of lords.
A. D. Brown of st. Louis has prom
ised to give $4,000 to the Missouri
Baptist sanatOrium, provided the sum
of $4,000 is raised. 1t is expected
that the conditions will be complied
with soon.