davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07

Prof. Triggs now puts the works of LongfelIow and Oliver Wendell Holmes in the doggerel class. The people are still waiting for a poem by Triggs.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
One or the Other.

"That social reformer has a very spectacular way of presenting some ex- traOrdinary theories"
 ''Yes. The man is either posing or supposing all the time "-Washingt Star.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
SUPPOSE WE SMILE.
HUMOROUS PARAGRAPHS FROM
 THE COMIC PAPERS.

Pleasant Incidents Occurring the World Over-sayingst that Are Cheer full to old or YounG-Funny SeIec- tions that Everybody Will Enjoy.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
At the Lunch Counter.

Mrs. Stickler-I don't like blackberry pie, but suppose I'll have to take 1t. Mrs. SchOppen-Why so, if there's some other kind you like better?
 Mrs. Stickler-I'm in mourning, you Philadelphia Press.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07

Another pleasant illusion dissolved. An explorer has brought us the news that the wild men of Borneo are very child-Iike and tame on their native soil.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
Ont Five

He came to borrow five, and I Was out. It's just a sin! I wouldn't have been out if Had only not been in. Philadelphia Press.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
A Creditable Movement.

Mrs. Horse-A lot of us girls have started an Audubon club"
 MT. Horse-What's that?
 Mrs. Horse-Why, we are not going to wear birds or wings on our hats.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07

Green Apples Are Now in Our Midst.
 Mrs. Bellefeld-Well, it's a good thing that Benny came past the Fourth without injury.
 MT. BelIefield- don't boast, my dear. The green peach season is con- Pittsburg ChrOnicle-Telegraph.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
Ouadrennial Legislative Sessions.

The Alabama Constitutional Conven. ton has decided that a session of the Legislature every four years is all the State can stand.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07

Some people who call themselves singers should be locked up for making false notes.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
The Difference.

Joakley-He used to be a newspaper man, but a rich uncle left him small fortune.
 Coakley - But understand that wasn't to make any difference.
 Joakley-O. yes. He's a journalist now.-Philadelphi Press.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
No Close Season.

Expect to do any hunting this fall?" "Yes, my wife and I are going to start out next week."
 That's rather early, isn't it?"
 'Maybe it is, but we'll get the start on the other house-hunters, who are now out of town. Philadelphia Press.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
I cave the felon a terrible look.

6tIfN t11O ACHO-1 E7
 "Are you not ashamed" 1 thundered, ito be mere thief when it is so easy to be an astute financierT
 "But it was not my fault" whimper- ed the fellow, 'that my victim had only S1Or'
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07

Old pewter is coming into fashion as much as old brass has been. Look over the garret again.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07

When the Chinese government, early
 in June, agreed to pay the full indem nity demanded by the powers, the next question was the manner in which pay
 ment should be made. Differences
 among the powers over this question
 account for the long deadlock in the
 negotiations which followed. China could not borrow the money on hel own credit. Precisely as an individual
 whose commercial rating is not good needs strong indorser to his notes be fore he can realize money on them, SC the bonds of China must be guaran teed by some other nation. No one na- tien was willing to assume the great responsibility of guaranteeing them all; and if any one of them had offered to do so, it would have aroused the suspi- cion that it intended to make it's risk good at later date by obtaining spe- cial concessions from China. It was proposed that the powers should guar antee the bonds jointly. The plan was favored by the powers whose credit is poor, because it promised the best pos sible security with the minimum of risk. But the United States objected; it would not become involved in a transaction which might require inter- national interference later. England objected because she saw no good req son why she should use her excellent credit to guarantee the bonds allotted to other powers. The only alternative was that each power should guarantee its own share of the bonds, and market them as it chose. But when this plan was decided on, a new difficulty arose. Japan had made its claim sufficient barely to cover its expenditures, and had put it on a cash basis. It could not market the bonds on its own guar antee except at a discount which in- volved a loss of three or four million dollars. It therefore asked to have it's allotment increased to cover this loss, but other powers objected, and some hinted at supplementary claims of their own. Japan then withdrew its claim, choosing to suffer the loss rather than prolong the negotiations. So the long deadlock was broken. It would be in teresting to know what impression these higglings among the powers have made upon the Chinese mind.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
The Pasf.

She-You were a long time in the Philippines, weren't you?
 He-Oh, yes. Ever since the first time the war ended.-Life.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
Logic.
ud-Never? And why so?

Maud-When are they to be married2 ? Ethel-NeYer.
 Maud-Never? And why so?
 Ethel-She will not marry him until he has paid his debts, and he cannot pay his debts until she marries him. Fun.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
Q. E. over.on. Pnbllsher

Love looks through a window; envy through a keyhole
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07

Fruits and vegetables are so scarce this year that the grocery store tastsS is having hard time.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07

Apples, raw apples, are now said to be good literary diet"
 'Yes; and for some poets I'd prescribe green appleszto keep them from writ ing"
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07

In politics the terms bosses" and "henchmen' always apply to the other side.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
Fomethinp Between Theu.

'T have called" began MT. FOrchen Hunt, ito speak to you about your daughter. You must have noticed that there is something between us"
 "No," replied Mir. GOldrox. "but Fm sure there will be pretty soOn."
 "Ahp'
 "It will be the Atlantic Ocean I'm going to send her abroad till she learns a little sense"
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
A Rentxuard.

Mrs. Dedbete-Why are you so par ticular about there being a fire escape leading from our apartments?
 MT. Dedbete-I simply want to guard against paying the rent.-OhiO State T0,1r,,o1
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
Extenuating Circumstance,

hope you haven't been chewing tObae- pO
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
A nro-

May-Jack bet Bess that he'd be en- gagged before she was.
 Pamela-Which won?
 May-Neither. They're engaged to each other.-Puck.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
Cause of Her Cold.

Poor Emersonia has a very severe cold" said Mrs. Backbay to Mrs. BOst- ing.
 Yes, the poor child took Off her heavyweight spectacles and put on her summer eyeglasses too soon." replied the latter.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07

The coquette is able to fiirt a fan and fan fiirt simultaneously.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
Within Bounds.

Clubberly-Have you ever been so desperately in love that you felt as if you couldn't control it?
 CastletOn-No. All the girls I've been in love with have been only moderately we'll off.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07

Tommy-I was goin' to chew it. but -boo-hOo-I saw you comin' an swal- lowed 1t.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
Caustic NIeanness.

"Start free ice-cream soda water fountains all over the country"
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
A Banauet.
IosduitoHI believe not

First Mosquito-Anything on this afternoon?
 Second Mosquito-I believe not
 '"Then come over to my house and join me at a baby's nap."-Life.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
A Hot One.
Shall I open the window I

"So you can get the air."-Detroit Free Press.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
EaaY.

(Which would you rather. Tommy. be born lucky or rich?" asked Uncle TrodWav
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
For the Public Good.
What

There's another thing Carnegie might do"
 "What?'
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
erRaYed.
to wear bird

He-Pve lost wealthy aunt to-day. She-When did she die?
 He-Oh, she isn't dead, but her niece has just tilted me-Judy.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
"Our dance, Miss Sergeant" The girl looked nn.


 The girl looked up.
 "Is it? No; 1 don't want to dance. Do you mind if we sit it out?"
 Do l mindY repeated Dawnay, with look in his blue eyes which only amused the beautiful Miss Sergeant. She had seen that look so often that it made little or no impression on her. Had she not danced and flirted through some dozen seasons and received more than her share of attention? Of course, Terence was nice, dear boy, but as to anything else-she laughed at the mere idea. She was striving for a higher destiny than that, in spite of all the so- ciety papers and their rumors.
 Dawnay looked at her as she lay back in a low chair waving a great feather fan to-and fro. He believed in her thoroughly. He believed that here wGs the lady of his dreams.
 Have you any more dances to spare meT' he pleaded. q know I was late, but that was not my fault"
 Not one left" she said indifferently. She talked to him in her low, sweet voice, and he was quite content to sit in the cool shadow and listen to her. And when do you go on leave" she said lazily.
 That" he said steadily. entirely depends on circumstances"
 Meaning the little girl you left in Devonshire:" she said, with a mocking smile. "Oh. know all about her! Lord Carruthers-you know him?-told me he knew her people"
 ''l don't know what you mean," he said hotly. ''There Is but one woman in the world for me, and she"
 He broke off. A couple were passing their retreat, talking in light, laughing tcLeS.
 "Rhoda Sergeant? Oh, she will end by marrying Carruthers, of course. She is only playing her usual little game with that nice boy, Dawnay. She might spare such a youngster. That sort of a woman has no mercy"
 The voice trailed into silence
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07

AO11IL11J O DOO LIOOs . -NOs I-IE- III-1- Mamma-I'm glad to hear that, but
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07
OYerafocked.

DUH, IepIIeu 1OuuJT scAIS- tiously.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-12-07

Tommy-o-boo-hool No. ma'am.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1901-01-25
INTERESTING MUSICAL EVENT.
Mile. Sicincns, the Famous German
Pianist, to Play Hero.

Mr. Frank Stayton Thompson has ar
ranged to give the musc-lovers of Rich
,nond and vicinity a rare treat at popular
prices He has secured Mile. trieda
Siemens, the renowned German pianist,
10 give grand concert a the Academy OF
Music on Wednesday night, February 9Th,
assisted by Nine Laura Howe, Boston,s
fayorue ballad singer, and Mr.. Charles
Russell. the famous English 'cellst. Ihis
will, il is asserted, be one of the finest
concerts ever given il Richmond, and VIII
prove interesting to all. for the programme
viii he made up of piano. vocal and cello
solos, also duets and trios.
Mime. Laura Howe has achieved an en-
yiable place among the concert singers OF
the United States. The Chicago Inter
ocean says OF her appearance in that me-
tropoiis: Nine. Howe. the soprano, made
a triunphal hit. The aria from ''F'reis-
chutz'' displayed her beautiful, sympa-
thetic voice which Immediately won
everybody For an encore she sang
F-alinins's I've Something Sweet to Tell
You, with a naiyete of manner that was
charming
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1901-01-25
LESLIE is ARRESTED.
Charged With Assaulting Mr.. Rich
ard w. IYtN

Mr.. Arthur Leslie. a steeple painter, was
arrested yesterday evening by officer
Schlief on the charge OF having assaulted
Mr. Ricard w Ivey. in Mr.. Ivey's home,
No. SoIl4 East Franklin Street. Wednes-
day night, and was taken to the Second
Police Station.
Mr.. Leslie said last night in regard TO
the affair that he had long been a per
sonal friend of AIR. and Mrs. lyey. and at
the time the trouble occurred he was in
the hail prior to Mr.. Iyey'S entrance talk
ing with Mrs. Ivey and her mother. The
three of them had just started out OF the
house when 1vey came in and the affair
occurred. Leslie said he thought lVey had
j pistol when he struck him. When the
case comes up in the Police Court, he
says he has no doubt but that he can
justify himself and clear Mrs. ivey OF any
suspicion that may rest upon her
Mr. Ivey is at the home of his brother.
Mt Charles Z. Iyey. No. 400 East DuVal
Street and is suffering from two painful,
though not serious. wounds on his head.
His wife is at his side and giving her in
jured husband every attention
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1901-01-25
Labor Notes.

Russia drinks about sSS 100000 worth of
tea every year
The telegraph system of the krupp-
works has 81 stations, with IS Morse tele-
graphic instruments and so miles circuit
The telephone system has 32S stations
with $50 telephones and circuit Of 200
miles. On April !, 1860 the total num-
Der OF persons employed in the different
works was 1850, namely. 2l.i63 at Essen,
3475 at the Gruson works OF Buckau, g..
$50 at the Germania works at Berlin and
kiel, 6,164 IN the coal mines, and 6,1S at
the blast furnaces, and on the testing
grounds at Meppen. etc.
Beer can now be made from oats
President Perkins OF the Cigar-nlak-
ers' International Union. reports an in
crease OF 5000 in general membership
during the year In the New York strike
$4,000 was paid to non-Gnionists who
went out. Cisarnakers Union, No. q.
of Boston, alone contributed $4,000 to the
strike and lockout in New. York.
A strike OF donlestics in New York city
is imminent.
The object of the Coal Salesmen's AS
ISOLATION of Chicago is the protection OF
statesmen, and arrangements are under
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1901-01-25
U UNSUCCESSFUL ENTERPRISE.
Why a DanvilIe Man Did Not Get a
W0SIe,

why Danvllle Man Did Not Get q
Woode" Leg.
A subscriber writes to US and wants
to know what has become of the fund to
buy the wooden leg sfor the unfortunate
DanVllle man who wanted to get on mis-
feet. We confess with shame that it
never grew large enough to command at
tention or consideration. $40 was the
total-and accordingly we dismissed the
case-paid the costs, and returned a YER
dict negligence against the people of
Danville.
1t was a case however, that brought
home with suddenness the proposition
that as you sow you shall reap. a vic
tim of folly-no doubt the unfortunate
man never meant to do what he debut
he did He drank rum; he walked the
Primrose path-he went to the dance and
stayed too late. And for that reason, and
that alone, this community turned a deaf
ear to the appeals for little charity, a
few dollars of the dross called gold for
which some men fight and murder: for
which some women yield their virtue;
yet for all that, had there been one man
in the town to take hold OF the fund and
push it-had the victim been a stranger,
no doubt the money could have been
raised within "a hours.
1t is belief that no matter what
causes misfortune, or how low Il man
may become, there is yet hope of his
reformation. And under Gods skies
there is nothing that will give to a weak
and erring one so much strength as
kind word at the right time. To have
bought the wooden leg for the man who
needed it would have been real charity
but it would not have been the kind that
walks on stills or which proclaims its
coming with brass band. And Danville
is much given to that sort.-Danville Bee.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1901-01-25

way to secure the cooperation OF the
miners and coal tean1sters 20 rsanizations
to enforce reasona bic Accommodation op-y
orators and coal dealers.
Russian gold mines average an annual
yield of S6,66S pounds ~
Chicago has 10000 telephnne wires
st. Petersburg is soonslo nave a nome
Kansas has more national than State
banks.
Nowhere in the history Of organized
labor has s,,chsa body, made the advance
in so short a time as the Switchlnen's
Union of North Amer lea. Starting from
nearly. nothing. "a coupleaof years ago. it
now has 1873 local bodies and $4,000 mem
hers.
Chicago journeymen plumbers won the
Saturday half-holiday. No strike.
After a five hours session the Chicago
Lake Seamen.s Union voted that mem:
bers holding political jobs could retain
their membership in the organization
Coal deposits exist in all the Austria
liam colonies. the largest being in New
South Wales. and the smallest in South
Australia. The total production to the
close of 1899 was S5.969.1S6 tons, repre-
sent.ng a value of f35 641 ,O04 The guam
tity of coal exported during 1899 was 3
79S,323 tons. value 51,UO5,794: the places
outside the Australian colonies to which
shipments were made being Ceylon, Fiji.
Kongkong, India Mauritius. New Gut
nea, Straits Settlements. Ceiebes. Chilli.
China, Cochin China. Ecuador, Hawaii.
Japan, Java, Marshall Islands, Mexico,
Molucca Islands, Mozambique, New Brit
ain, New Caledonia, Panama, Peru. tie
Philippines. South Sea Islands and Amer
lea. A few hundred tons were also ship
ped to, Great Britain. The output for
1900 is expected to be the largest on rec
ord.
The Philadelphia Labor League decided
to so in municipal politics, along with
the Allied Building Trades Council and
the painters organization. and appoint
ed a committee to cooperate with those
bodies in propounding the questions to
the candidates for Council. The secre-
tary was instructed to write to the Exec-
utive Council of the American Fedora
ton of Labor. stating that when that
body lives up to its own laws by compel1-
ing all affiliated locals to join the United
Labor League. the League will expel all
dual or seeding organizations, as re-
quired by the new law.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1901-01-25
y C.,S1iy Investment.

James Holland (coloredO is free, but
James is vaccinated. James is the negro
WHO was vaccinated and then went to a
hydrant and carefully washed off the vac
cine matter
James spent a day and night in Jail.
paid 81 and was then vaccinated again
and turned loose. He will not wash Off
this latest vaccine investment. Other
people may take to hydrants. but they
run their own risks. Other people pay
from 10 cents to 81 for being vaccinated.
James paid S11. and a day and night in
Jail for his. His vaccination is too val
liable to lose, through anything so COM
mon as Dan River water.-Danville Bee
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1901-01-25
Device to Reset the Tcn.Pins

The desire to decrease the time and
labor necessary to reset the pins after
an inning in the game OF ten-pins has
led Richard r. Downey, of Menominee,
MIDI, to design an automatic arrange
ment. which not only does away win
the assistant formerly used for this work,
but accomplishes the task in q much
shorter space of time than he could do
it. Our illustration gives view of the
pin end of the alley, and shows the man
ner of resettins the pins when they are
knocked down. y number of strong cords
which, the inventor states, are preferably
of catgut, are secured to the lower ends
Of the pins. The opposite ends of the
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1901-01-25
S. a. l.. R'y.
SEABOARD AIR LINE RAILWAY.
LEAVES CHESAPEAKE AND OHIO
DEPOT-BROAD-STR
STATION.
SCHEDULE IN EFFECT JAN. IS, 1901.

SCHEDULE IN EFFECT JAN Is, 1901.
TRAINS LEAVE RICHMOND.
3:2O A A. DAILY. for Petersburg. Hen.
derson, and all intermediate local
points This train makes close con-
nectIon at Ridgeway Junction with
through train Tor Raleigh, Atlanta.
and all points South and Southwest,
and runs through daily 60 Durham.
o:4o p II. DAILY. for Petersburg. Ra.
leigh. Columbia, Savannah, Jack.
sonville. Tampa. Key West and all
Florida points This train runs
through solid to Jacksonville.
1870 P. NJ. DAILY. Tor Petersburg. Rn-
leigh. Charlotte. Atlanta. Mont.
gomery, Mobile. New Orleans ana
for. Atlanta. Columbia. Savannah.
Jacksonville and Tampa.
TRAINS ARRIVE RICHMOND.
sonville, Savannah. Columbia. Ra,
leigh and all points South.
$50 p. N. DAILY. from Tampa, JACK
sonvilIe. Savannah; Columbia. At.
burg and all points South and
S:1a P. NJ. DAILY. from Henderson, Re.
tersburs, and all local intermediate
cept Sunday
For 1urIher Information. tickets. Pull
man and Sleeping-car reservations. rates.
n ap pse ans ssseass AIRY LINZ Z
WAY or to C.. W. Morris, Deput Ticket
Agent. Broad-Street Station tChssapeake
and Ohio Depot. the Richmond Transfer
Gempany Hotel p2s East Mzh ss siTa the
E. ST. JOHN. $50 E. Main St
" p & Gen. Man r. z. Z. BUNCH.
General Passenger Agent.
: ! u
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1901-01-25
AGRICULTURAL DEPARTMENT.
Is OF Immense Value to the Prosperity
of the Nation.

There is an inclination these days for
everybody to treat the Agricultural De-
partment-State or Federai-as a Joke
and TO give it a kick in passing. The
LynchburS News presents strong exam
pies of the immense value of the United
States Department of Agriculture 10 the
nation. which those who are wont TO
regard with Indifference its work should
read.
Few persons arc aware of the full eN-
tent OF the benefits conferred upon the
country by the intelligent operations OF
the Agricultural Department at Wash
ington Mr. Wilson. the present Secreta-
ry of Agriculture. Yields TO none of his
predecessors in zeal for the promotion
of agricultural interests of every sec
ton One of the chief objects of the de-
partment is to introduce plants or seeds
from foreign countries that may prove
profitable in the United States. The
work of tie department should not be
COMPOUNDED with the free distribution of
common seeds, which is indefensible9
from any point Of view. for it is waste
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1901-01-25
New Ocean View iinnd.

Work on the new Bay Shore Electric
Railroad will begin on February LIST, and
it is expected cars will be running by
May 1st. This new route to Ocean View
will have its depot in the Atlantic Ter
minal Station, Plume and Atlantic Streets
1t Will use the Sewel's Point Railway
tracks as far as Park Place and then
switch off to the Indian Toll Bridge Road,
thence to Ocean View. 1t is understood
the depot at Ocean View will be located
near where the big hagpoe stands on the
green.-Norfolk Dispatch.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1901-01-25
THE GlFFEN COMPANY AGAIN.
He A,rangcs for Season at the
Academy.

! Mr. r. L. Giffen was in the city yester
day in conference with Manager Thomas
G. I.eath and it was finally settled that
he viii bring his stock company to the
Academy of Music for the summer sea-
son. opening April 21st.
Although there We're three applicants,
Mr.. Giffen was finally successful in On
tanning the house. His excellent record
last summer made him the choice of the
its effect on the decision
Mr.. Giffcn says that he Will bring back
several of the members Of the old COM
pany. but that it Will be materially
strengthened by acceSSionS. He will also
be more ambitious in the line OF produc-
lions. and it is confidently expected that
.hc company will make an artistic and
financial success. Mr.. Gitfcn leaves to-
night for Washington.