davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The age-herald., 1901-06-02
GAGS AT THE THEATERs.
Comparative Popularity of Persons
 and Things for Joke Purposes.

From the New York Sun.
 A man who makes the rounds of the theaters where gags are permitted has been keeping tab on the persons and topics on which most of the gags are heard. They are in the order named Senator Depew the Committee of Fif- teen, Senator Platt, Russell Sage, the Broadway conductor, the tunnel now being built, Brooklyn, Philadelphia and the East River Bridge.
 It is rather odd, said the man who makes the returns, that a joke told on Brooklyn in a Manhattan theater will cause a bigger laugh than a better one told at the expense of Philadelphia. The shots at Senator Depew are always good natured and the Senator himself laughs heartily at them If he Is present.
 It is rather doubtful whether MT. Sage would laugh at some of the gags at his expense. Although fifth on the list a gag can produce more laughs on a Broadway conductor than on any other character. He has no friends on the stage. Dr. Parkhurst Is the only clergy man in the city with whom the gag com edians take any liberty.
 It is a little early for the Constitution and Shamrock joke, but 1t will be work ed to finish long before the race. Cro- ker at present is not a good name with which to couture.
The age-herald., 1901-06-02
Prince Carl at the Phone.

From the Chicago RecordHerald.
 The following story is being told at the Stockholm cafes:
 The telephone in the stage managers office in one of the variety theaters was ringing and an inquiry was made if the scene box was vacant that evening. How should I know?'H brusquely an- swered the stage manager. Enquire at the box office" What Is the number?" asked the speaker. Look in the book. you idiot! I am not a telephone direc- tory" was the answer of the exasper- ated manager. Excuse me for troub- ling you," came the voice over the wire. This Is Prince Carl who is speaking" and the telephone rang off. The poor manager gave a gasp and almost fainted away. No Prince Carl attended the per formance that evening.
The age-herald., 1901-06-02

TEETHINA was first used by pr. Charles J. Moffett, a graduate of Jeffer- son Medical College. Philadelphia, Pa.. .in his extensive and successful treatment of children in Georgia in overcoming the troubles incident to teething and hot sum mers TEETHONA CTeething Powders) counteracts the effect of hot weather and keeps the digestive organs in a healthy condition, and has saved the lives of thousands of children in the doctors na- tive state, where physicians prescribe and all mothers give 1t, and it is criminal in mothers of our section to allow their babes and little children to suffer and perhaps die when relief can be so easily obtained by giving TEETHINA. It costs only 25 cents at druggists; or mail 2 cents to c. J. Moffett, M. D., St. Louis. Mo.
The age-herald., 1901-06-02
ST, CLAIR SPRINGS

The Baden Baden of Alabama will be opened as a first class health and summer resort on
 JUNE THE FIRST, 1901. by the undersigned. We have built a large dining room, bath house and pavil- ion. and have fitted up a number of cot tages with all the comforts of modern hotels.
 Our service, cuisine and accommoda- tions will be perfect, our prices moderate. St. Clair Springs Is the best family re- sort of the South.
 For terms or any other information write us either directly to St. Clair Springs, post office Cornelia, St. Clair County Alabama, or care of our city ad- dress, the new Metropolitan Hotel, Bir- -mingham, Ala
 LESSER 6 GILARDONi. ]. 5-22-Wed- fri-Sun-tf
The age-herald., 1901-06-02

ical storm came sweeping out of the East and played hovoc with the unpre- pared shipping. Several good sized craft were knocked to pieces, but we escaped with no damage whatever I tried to get the captain to tell me how he knew the gale was coming, but his answers were vague. That he felt it in his bones was the nearest he came to defnate statement This old tribe of prophets seems to have died out,' added the me- neurological enthusiast, "and the mod ern sea captain doesn't make any pre- tensions in that line. Storm smelling has become lost art"
The age-herald., 1901-06-02
MOZLEY'S LEMON ELIXIR Regulates the Liver, Stomach, Bowels
 and Kidneys,

For biliousness. constipation. and malaria.
 For indigestion, sick and nervous head ache.
 For sleeplessness, nervousness, heart failure, and nervous prostration.
 For fever, chills. debility and kidney diseases take Lemon Elixir.
 Ladies for natural and thorough organic regulation take Lemon Elixir.
 60c and s1 per bottle at druggists.
 Prepared only by Dr. H. Mozely, At lanta, Ga.
The age-herald., 1901-06-02
MozIey's Lemon Elixir.

Cured my husband, who was afflicted for years with large ulcers on his leg, and was cured after using two bottles; and cured a friend whom the doctors had given up to die. who had suffered for years with indigestion and nervous pros tration. MRS. E. A. BEvILLE
 Woodstock, Ala.
The age-herald., 1901-06-02
MozIey's Lemon EIIxir.

I suffered with indigestion and dysen- tery for two long years. I heard of Lem on Elixer; got it; taken seven bottles and am now 8 well man.
 HARRY ADAMS No. 1734 First Avenue, Birmingham, Ala
The age-herald., 1901-06-02
Gratitude.

Dr. H. Mozley-Dear Sir: Since using your Lemon Elixir I have never had an- other attack of those fearful sick head aches, and thank God that I have at last found medicine that will cure those aw- full spells.y MRS. ETTA w. JONES.
 Parkersburg, West Virginia
The age-herald., 1901-06-02
THE CHICAGO BEACF
GLEN ALPINE SPRINGS

Situated twelve miles from Newport Tenn English Mountains rhe
  mail W Webster City,
The age-herald., 1901-06-02

For beautifully illustrated deck of playing cards, write B. W. Wrenn, pas- senger traffic manager. Plant System. Savannah. Ga. sending 25 cents in pos tage or cash. 5-29-tf
The age-herald., 1901-06-02
A CARD.

For nervous and stick headaches indi- gestion, biliousness and constipation (of which have been great sufferer) I have never found a medicine that would give such pleasant prompt and perman- ent relief as Dr. H. Moziey's Lemon Elixir. W J.P. SAWTELL, Griffin, Ga. fl
 AA Publisher Morning Call
The age-herald., 1901-06-02
Invigorating and. refresh ing-Moerlein Beer.

Concert be Memoli's band East Lake every Sunday
The age-herald., 1901-06-02
BLOOD SATURATED WITH POISON OAK.

BLUUD SAI UhA IED WlIH PUiSUM JAN.
 MT. John Friel, of Bear Station, Del, writes: "I was poisoned with poison oak which went through my blood, and my condition became so serious that the doctors all said could not get well. I remained in O precarious condition, con- fined to the house, for six months, when J saw 9. s. 6. advertised and began it's use, soon realizing that it was doing me good. continued the medicine and was cured entirely. I think it the best blood medicine made"
The age-herald., 1901-06-02
THE FOUNTAIN SPRING HOUSE, WdukeShd. Wis.

OPENS JUNE 18th, 1901. For rates, H. lustrated booklet. etc., address
 J. c. WALKER, Manager. 5-2S-tu-fri-sun.
The age-herald., 1901-06-02
Their Sting Sets the Skin on Fire and Fills the Veins with 0 Violent, Lingering Poison

fences or rocks, sometimes reach a
 ing great heights; the leaves are e nearly square in shape, smooth NJ and shiny and three on each stem; NJ the flowers are of a greenish white N color. and the berries pale green or S
The age-herald., 1901-06-02

like edges and downy appearance underneath. While in appearance the poisonous effects very similar After the swelling subsidies the skin remains for long
 time ill rough and nhamed condition, dotted here and there with bad looking ulcers and little fostering It is truly remarkable with what regularity and certainty the disease returns, and always schedule eime appearing the month, day and hour, almost
 that did the year before Don't be deceived should all
The Springfield herald. (Springfield, Baca County, Colo.) 1887-1919, 1901-02-22

The list of occupations for women
lengthens. There are shoe breakers
in England. For stated price wom-
an will undertake to wear new shoes
for one of her customers from two to
four days. When times are good she
has several pairs of shoes in charge at
the same time. Nothing is said of the
effect upon the professionals DISPOSE
ton, although it is easy to see that
what she may lose in equanimity is
sure to be offset by the improved tenn
per of the customer.
The Springfield herald. (Springfield, Baca County, Colo.) 1887-1919, 1901-02-22

A medical journal, commenting upon
the treatment of George Washington in
his final illness, remarks that "the
almshouse patient today has more ra-
tional treatment than the ex-president
of the united States had in 1889"
This is doubly interesting; not only
does 1t emphasize our obligation to a
century of scientific study, but it sug-
gests that a hundred years hence peo-
pie may condemn, as crude and I'M
scientific the present methods. which
seem to us so wonderful.
The Springfield herald. (Springfield, Baca County, Colo.) 1887-1919, 1901-02-22

A design for the memorial which the
tenantry and friends of the Earl of
Airlie, who was killed at the battle OF
Diamond hill, near Pretoria. last June,
decided to erect to his memory has now
been accepted and a site selected. The
memorial, which closely follows the
character of the tower at Airlie castle,
the ancestral home of the Ogilvys in
Forfarshire, is modification of the old
Scottish peel tower, and will be erect
ed on Tullo hill (1,230 feet above sea
leveD, near the family seat at Cor
tachy The base of the tower will b.
worked out in rock-faced ashlar, re-
lieved with dressed panels with carved
representations of the family arms and
badges of the different regiments in
which the late earl served.
The Springfield herald. (Springfield, Baca County, Colo.) 1887-1919, 1901-02-22

In one of his earliest cases Daniel
O'Connell the famous Irish liberator.
made a report which attracted consid-
cradle attention to him. He was cross
examining an awkward witness, who
declared that he hao drunk nothing but
his share of a pint of whisky. "On
your oath, now" Numbered the young
counsel, was not your share all but
the PEWTER"
The Springfield herald. (Springfield, Baca County, Colo.) 1887-1919, 1901-02-22

The British postal department com
mission, which has been inquiring into
the subject of wireless telegraphy foE
several months, will shortly report in
favor of the earliest possible adoption
OF the Marconi system. The commits
sion is also arranging for the pur-
chase of Marconi patents and is nego-
tiating with France and Germany rel
ative to their attitudes toward the
Marconi inventions.
The Springfield herald. (Springfield, Baca County, Colo.) 1887-1919, 1901-02-22

Kansas has a law forbidding the
marriage of first cousins. Mr.. and
Mrs. William II. Beck are now under
going Jail sentence for its violation,
having been arrested on the complaint
of Mrs. Becll's brother. said to have
been inspired by his desire for Ven
geance. After their release from prison
they will cross over to Nebraska and
be legally married, and on their return
with,
The Springfield herald. (Springfield, Baca County, Colo.) 1887-1919, 1901-02-22

Recently the medical faculty of the
University of Hei lelbsrg has mace an
Interesting report on the effect OF the
incandescent light, whether gas or
electric, upon the eyes. After mature
deliberation they have decided that
the incandescent light is not harmtu
and they specially recommend electric
ity for lighting halls and places of en-
tertainment.
The Springfield herald. (Springfield, Baca County, Colo.) 1887-1919, 1901-02-22

During the recent restoration of St.
Martins church at Novey, Switzerland,
a primitive edifice was discovered a
few feet below the floor of the building,
says the New York Post. In shape it
somewhat resembles a church. but the
style of architecture is quite foreign to
source. The walls and foundations of
the relic are in a remarkable state of
preservation, and the structure is be-
lieved by experts to be one of the ear
lest buildings in which stone was en-
ployed.
The Springfield herald. (Springfield, Baca County, Colo.) 1887-1919, 1901-02-22

Emperor William is evidently highly
pleased with his new imperial chan
cellor for his majesty went in person
to Graf Bulow's house and conferred
upon him the high order of the Black
Eagle; and, too, just before Christmas
day, which seems rather to hint that
the honor is an exceptionally great one
and designed to give pleasure to the
recipient at the time of universal re-
joicing
The Springfield herald. (Springfield, Baca County, Colo.) 1887-1919, 1901-02-22

The secretary of agriculture, Mr..
Wilson, is at times pleasantly satirical
A reporter for a sensational news
paper recently called upon him to ask
if anything of moment was happening
in his department. The secretary re-
piled by reciting long list of i'm
portant investigations, the results of
which were of the greatest value to the
world But" added the secretary.
you do not want anything of that
kind; you would not telegraph such
reports over the country" The re-
porter, not seeing the humor of the
secretary. complacently nodded: mo,
no; that's So"
The Springfield herald. (Springfield, Baca County, Colo.) 1887-1919, 1901-02-22
THE HERALD.
SPRINGFIELD, COLORADO.

rnere is a SPECIAL class of farm la
borers in Sweden who are given so
many acres OF land for their own use
In consideration of so many days Ia
Dor during the year for the owner of
the farm. They are a sort of fixture
to an estate, and their like exists in no
other country.
The Springfield herald. (Springfield, Baca County, Colo.) 1887-1919, 1901-02-22

Work has begun on the extension of
the Colorado x Southern railway up
the Purgatoire river. Beginning at
Longs canon about five miles west of
Trinidad. rails are being laid on an old
grade to the thompson mine. The road
will be laid on the north side of the
river to North Fork, then up the valley
to Stonewall, thence to the Ponil marx
country. where there is an abundance
of excellent timber. The Colorado &,
Wyoming branch is being graded and
will parallel the Colorado & Southern
on the south side of the river to Weston
and two miles beyond where the Col
orado Fuel and Iron Company is open
ing large body of coal.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1901-11-28

turnip, 1t doesn't require q starving
man to relish it raw and pronounce 1t
good. Pumpkins and squash will De
ing time, and they lend the glow Of life {
to nature after the other crops have
been stripped from the ground. The
prize pumpkin has passed through the
kitchen on it's way to flank the dinner
turkey, but it's mate is on show in the
farmers porch or possibly In the din
ing room or parlor. 1t will be peeled
and dried later, and there will be pump
kin pies on the farmers table after all
the turkeys have gone under the ak. In
the storeroom, place sealed to all but
the very elect, the good wife has her
shelves filed with jars and cans Of
summer fruit jellies and preserves
These sweetmeats are not to be shown
on Thanksgiving day, but their maker
and custodian is thankful that they are
there, and the rest Of the folks will
have cause to be before the winter is
over. In the cellar are casks of apple
Juice in varying stages Of treatment,
and perhaps the cider mill is still leak
ing from the grinding of pulp which
only stopped at noon out of respect to
the holiday.
Even the cattle and horses, the swine
and fowls on the farm, are thankful
when the end Of November closes in,
although second joints and wishbones
have no special charms for them. The
horses and oxen know that the seasons
work is over, and they see the mows
and stacks of fodder gathered in for
their benefit. The cows may chew
their cuds contentedly in the stall all
winter long and have rest from the
ordeal Of milking time. The hens are
happy, for they behold food for weeks
to come lying around the barnyard and
on the thrashing floor and the towering
stacks of grain tell them there is more
where the last came from, without raid
ing the fields at the risk Of meeting
dogs and shotguns.
And in the woods, too, the squirrel
laughs joyous laugh on Thanksgiv-
ing day-laughs because his stores of
nuts are gathered in, laughs, too, be-
cause the farmers boy is too full or
turkey and pumpkin pie to shoot quick
or with steady aim. Yes, all nature re-
joices in the golden days Of autumn.
Her labors are ended; her hidden
springs are filling with fruitful nectar
for another years work. Thanksgiving
would be celebrated anyway, even
without proclamations and the conven-
tional turkey and cranberry sauce. 1t
is in the air and in the earth and in the
heart of man, be he Christian or hea-
then, to echo the benediction Of the Gre
ator when he looked upon his handi-
work and called it "good."
The Sauk Centre herald., 1901-11-28
.&S)

Spitzenburghs are better at the close
of the feast. The Gillyfower is rather
hearty to begin on, and the Spy, King
and Russet are best after wintering
awhile. The windrows Of grapes, the
heaps of seductive pears and baskets
Of fragrant ounces set off the store of
good things which the farmers wife
and daughters have under their espe-
cial care from budding time to the
sweetmeat stage, but all help them
selves on Thanksgiving day, for these
are luxuries to be proud of.
The boys have brought in their bags
of shining chestnuts, also walnuts,
just out Of their bleaching shucks and
looking like newly washed babe. 1t
is a wonder that there is any appetite
left for turkey after the eye has feast
ed upon natures bounties, but the
good woman Of the house never has
cause to complain that the table is neg
lected. The private view of all the
good things in raw bulk is not exactly
cloying, but it is discouraging to think
of the work ahead that must be done
to put all those stores out of sight.
The fragrance of storehouse and Gel
lar is most appetizing of all. Granaries
are bursting with bins filed with corn,
rye, wheat and buckwheat, and the
griddlecakes, mullins and savory fresh
loaves yet to materialize may be left
to Imagination. They form the ordi-
nary staff of life and will not be want
ed on this day of feasting. A raw po-
tato is not interesting to look at, but
the dull hued tuber has a knack OF
cleaning itself, and mammoth pile
fresh from Mother Earth is sight to
discourage fears about starvation.
, The turnip Is another tuber dug from
the soil, but 80 clean as to quicken
the appetite Of the beholder. The hun
cry man relishes turnip, and one can
sometimes envy the English Hodge who
was asked what he had for dinner in
the field and held up chunk Of black
bread for the answer. Nothing but
that7" said his questioner. ''Oh, yes;
I sometimes eats a raw turmut"
Colonel Mulberry Sellers afflicted his
auditors with . .watery mouth when
he laid out stage feast consisting
solely Of raw turnips.
And. the green hued cabbages stacked
IKE cannon balls, but mountain high!
Encountered on the farmers field, the
cabbage is anything but extensively fra.
grant. In fact, It Is sweetness itself.
The cabbage Of commerce. with its
leaves bruised and wilte6 10 poor
representative OF the noble vegetable
q II comes from The field. Like the
The Sauk Centre herald., 1901-11-28
EXPENSIVE % DINNERS.
Two That Were Served I'm Delmon'
icO's Old Place In New York.

Two That Were Served I'm Delmon-
ico's Old Place In New York.
Probably the most expensive dinner
ever given at Delmonico's old restau-
rant, on Fourteenth street, New York,
was that given by Mr.. Morton Peto to
the tea and coffee merchants of New
York, 200 in number! 1t cost $25,0O0.
The rarest wines and the most elab-
crate decorations were mere incidents.
The menu cards were of gold, and the
guests sat on silk cushions on which
their names were embroidered. In the
center of the table was a miniature
lake in which swan swans taken from
Central park. Clara Louise Kellogg re
ceived $1,000 for singing two songs at
this feast and present besides Of
diamond bracelet. The salon was
smothered in flowers. : -
Another dinner given at one Of the
Delmonico establishments for ten peo-
PIE cost $4O0 plate. 1t was luxurious
enough to be classical. The walters,
five Of them, were dressed as sailors.
The host was a yachtsman, and he
bought the walters .clothes. The guests
drank, or, rather, tasted, every yinted
liquor that ever has been brought to
America. They finished with a pousse
cafe made of eleven liqueurs. Before
each plate sat cut glass basin about
twenty inches in diameter and, four
inches deep. Each was nearly filled
with water perfumed with altar of
roses, on the surface of which fioated
half open pond lilies. In the basin q
perfect model Of the yacht owned by
the host was placed. It was cut In
red cedar wood. with cabin. rail. wheel
for steering, brasswork, such as be-
laying pins and binnacles. manropes
worked and trimmed with sailor knots,
scraped pine masts and booms, rigging
Of silken cords colored as 1t would be
in the original, and sails Of satin.
There were gold oar and many other
gewgaws.-New York Sun.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1901-11-28

The traveller advanced toward Mi
chael and laid his hand heavily on his
shoulder.
"Is it so?''' he said in q rough voice.
"You will not give up your horses to
me?'
"No,' answered Michael, So
"yery well, then they shall belong to
whichever of us is able to start. De-
fend yourself. for. shall not spare
your e. u, $ts
So saving the traveller drew his saber
from it's sheath, and Nadia threw her
self before Michael. 4.::s ISL.
Blount and Alcide Jolivet advanced
toward him.
81 shall not fight" said Michael quiet
ly, folding his arms across his chest.
"You will not fight| s
mo" <t
.Not even after this?" exclaimed the
traveller, and before any one could pre-
vent him he struck MichaePs shoulder
with the handle of the whip. AT this
insult Michael turned deadly pale. His
hands moved convulsively, as if,he
would have knocked the brute down.
But by tremendous effort he master
ed himself. A duel! It was more than
a delay; it was perhaps the failure OF
his mission. 1t would be better to
lose some hours. Yes, but to- swallow
this affrOnt. ,ar % r
"Will you fight now, coward?' re-
heated the trayeler, adding coarseness
to brutality. .s-. @
mo" answered Michael, without
moving. but looking the other straight
in the face. "
'sThe horses this moment" said the
man and left the room The postmas-
ter followed him.
The effect produced on the reporters
by this incident was not to Michael s
advantage. Their discontinue was Wis
ible. How could this strong young
man allow himself to be struck like
that and not demand satisfaction for
such an insult? They contented them
selves with bowling to him and retired.
A moment afterward the noise Of
wheels and the cracking of whip
showed that the berlin, drawn by the
tarantass' horses, was driving rapidly
away from the posthouse. 81
Nadia, unmoved, and Michael, still
quivering, remained alone in the room.
The courier Of the czar, his arms
crossed over his chest, was seated mo-
tionless as a statue. However, a color
which could not have been the blush
of shame had replaced the paleness on
his manly countenance.
Nadia did not doubt that powerful
reasons alone could have allowed him
to suffer so great a humiliation from
such man. "a
Then, going up to him as he had come
to her in the police station at Mini
Novgorod, she said:
"Your hand, brother"
And at the same time her hand with
an almost maternal gesture wiped away
q tear which sprung to her compan.
ions eyes.
l.. fro BE Continued
The Sauk Centre herald., 1901-11-28

q herald Of the trooping corn and wine.
A pompous. strutting braggart. he sets
OF the bursting crops admirably. There
are lots Of good things behind the tur-
key, and any one not q farmer can md
q better treat In the background than
he can at the front on the last Thurs
day Of November In any year Of our
Lord.
For an appetizer q ripe tall apple h
far ahead and away ahead Of any con-
coction Of the barkeeper. One may re-
gale on Seek No Fnrthers and not look
farther for Q better flavor. hut Q din
ner will be appreciated al the same.
Pippins ere also hight and Juicy. but