davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Graham guardian., 1901-07-05
Here's A Hint For Brides.

One of last weeks Washing ton
brides caused something of SEN
sation by draping her veil in Eliza
bethian style and wearing clusters
of flowers behind each ear, after
the fashion of the japanese. She
also carried a big feather fan in
stead Of the usual boquet. This is
an innovation that might well be
followed by subsequent brides Of
the season.
1t has often been remarked that
girl never looks worse than on
her wedding day, and one reason
for this Is that almost invariably
she is robed exactly like every
other bride without any regard for
her own personal peculiarities of
face and figure. Custom has de-
creed the same draping for the
veil, the same arrangement of
orange blossoms, the long sieve
and high neck for ever young wo-
man who goes to the altar irres-
pective to whether she is tall, thin
or inclined to stoutness. White,
also, is very trying color and
few brides are daring enough to
depart from the ivory white which
is the most severe of all.
Modistes study the type of their
customers when they make their
house and walking-gowns and ball
toiiettes, but when it comes to a
wedding dress thege frG certain
rules that seem to be unalterabte.
The bride who dared to depart
from the conventional fastening Of
her veil and the boquet which is
always such az awkward possession
during the ceremony is to be cop
graduated for setting fashion
which may inspire others to do the
same thing; not in copying the
fashion which was so becoming to
her Oriental type, but in finding
out what particular little individu-
ality they can give to the most i'm
portant gown Of their lives. o
Graham guardian., 1901-07-05
JESTS FROM JUDGE.
THE TRAMP's EPITAPH.

Beneath this stone, forever hid,
There rests a lifelong prowler,
The only work he ever did
Was when he worked the growler
ONE WAY OF TELLING.
Curley-See that fellow over
there? He used to go to the same
college that I did. | wonder if he
remembers me?
Burleigh--Ask him for the loan
of five dollars.
Curley-What for?
Burleigh-If he remembers you
you won't get it.
A DESERVING OBJECT.
Mrs. Farmer-Are you looking
for work?
Ruby Knose-No, lady; Pm
lookin' fer sympathy. Pve had
six jobs offered me in two hours.
A NECESSARY ACCOMPLISHMENT.
Mrs. Dorcas-Did she lose all
that money at bridge whist because
she didn't know how to playY
Dorcas-No; because she didn't
know how to cheat.
THE REAL AGONY.
Ethel Con her natal day)-Isn't
it awful to think that we are year
older every birthday.
Gladys---Dear me, no! The
awful stage comes when we have
to get year younger every birth
day.
Graham guardian., 1901-07-05

A man named Moon was pre-.
sented with a daughter by his wife
That was "a new moon. The old
Moon was so overcome with Joy
that he went off and got drunk,
and that was full moon. When
he became sober he had but 25
cents left. That was the last quar-.
ter. But when his mother-in-law
met him at the door with a rolling
pin there was total eclipse of the
moon with seven stars visible.
Graham guardian., 1901-07-05

Underwear and blankets at cost
at Layton, Alfred & Cos, 46tf
Graham guardian., 1901-07-05
MATTHEwsvILLE NOTES.
Special Correspondence to the GUARDIAN.
Matthewsville, alias Hogtown,
July 3. 100 and l,

Matthewsville, alias Hogtown,
July 3, 100 and l.
MISTER EDITOR: l have bin wait
in with the pashunce ov Job for
somethin to turn up so l could tell
you about it, but marry a turnop. l
wuz jist about on the eve of
givenptible desperashun when
sumpthun most unexpicterating
happund in most unthinkabout- |
able way ourself bein the leading |
karickter in the performance.
1t happuned on this wize and
after you have hearn it you can
juge for yourself whether it was
wize or otherwize.
This IL how it wuz. We had jist
hooked on tu our horse and buggy
to go for drive; now don't be a
sidlin off tn wards the waste baskit
for this is going to be interestin,
the interduckshun tu the contrary
notwithstandin. Evry story has
it's climax jist the same as every
tobacker chawer duz, and if you'll
wait about a jiffy Pill tell you awl
about it.
You see-if you. cant you'd better
buy you sum gogels. But as L
wuz a sayin, theirs a ditch about
rod, rod-an-haf er 2 rods from our
house and its about a foot, foot-an-
a-haf er 2 feat deap and a jump.
jump-an-a-haf er 2 jumps alkrost it,
Well the uther da mi nabor ploud
up mi krossin and | had to kross
WHARF thare wasn't no krossin, an
the banks on both sides wuz strait
up an dicular. Well when [ driv
I up | sayz "stiddy tharen' in kind
ov a deep barrel tone voise an
gethered up mi strings; but | CESS
the pesky quadruped thot he new
mour about gittin over bitches
than what l did, and frum the way
he started out | think it wuz hiz
intenshun to pick us up an set us
over so as not tn muddy the
wheels. However he fell littel
bit short in his kalkalashuns and
droppt the wagin at the secont
bank. The animels, that is to say
myself and the horse, reached the
opposit shore awl 0. X. which
means awl in heap.
As near as [ can Fememhep
think l kut trianular fgor, the
, apex pointing skyward. After
goin by anuf to make shure ov be-
in over the ditch and out ov kick
in distance oy the horse ! Tux a
strait header for Pekin, China,
l am ov the opinyun that | wood
hav reached their in dew season
lhad it not bin for an obstruckshun
which rose up in my path and in
terupted my progress. | think it
waz terra firma, at least can say
, it was terrible firm for it didn't
give an inch when | struck it. The
hull shootenmatch happppd in less
time than it would take you to say
Rob dickinson, that is | think it
did, it was sorter like a mite horse
or an optikal dilushun tn me; but
, when | rekuvered mi konchunce |
found it waz no dreem. The first
thing / did waz to explore the rist
for the pultz to see if was breath
in yet and thank goodness | found
: that the loom ov life was still 2
wavin. l fnly suckseeded in ex-
trikatin miself from the debris an
kuckel burs and once more feunit-
ing mi horse an buggy ] dPiy oft,
Now | kali that genuin tufnupi
tho III admit | looked kind rad
ish when l riz up from the gronnd.
Moral-When we're waitin for
sumthing to turn up, lettuce not be
caby head enuf TO allow ourselves
to be beet. This we kan du bi
garden our ackshuns.
IjYN c., DOYLE.
Graham guardian., 1901-07-05
AGAIN.

Our rotten judicial system de-
mands the attention of all fair
minded citizens. There is no use
to scold the court. On the con-
trary, says the Globe Iemes, such
a course might result in 100 days
for contempt, and 100 days of
Chinese diet and 100 days for re-
Election in the basement of the
court house. The fault is with the
system. A system which drags
men l40 miles away from
their families, away from their
business, and away from their
spheres of usefulness; makes jury
men of them, then dictates what
their verdict shall be, is not only
outrageous, it is simply Infamous.
"Gentlemen of the Jury, have
you arrived at verdict"
"We have, your Honor"
"What is it?"
at is what you directed lis to
bring in, your Honor"
"Gentlemen Of the Jury, how
did you arrive at this verdict"
Fellow Citizens-We did not ar
rive at the verdict, at all; the court
arrived at it for us.
Gentlemen Of the Jury, what are
you for, any way?"
We are here to answer roll call
when the bailitf yells "Hear YEP
from the court house steps; to
swear with uplifted hands that we
will decide the case according to
the law and the evidence; then de
eide it according to the law and
not the evidence"
Gentlemen of the Jury, did you
desire to decide the case that way?'
"No, no, no."
"Gentlemen of the Jury, what
are you going to do about it?"
"Why, we have concluded to
take our medicine, because we
don't know anything else to do;
yet we are American citizenss, tax
payers, and in case the country is
in danger we will have to step to
the front and protect it with our
lives and our last drop of blood"
Talk about your overpowering,
egregrIous, monumental humbugs,
but this judicial system is the most
hagrant that the American peo-
pie ever hoisted onto their shoul-
der; especially when there is a
corporation concerned,
Graham guardian., 1901-07-05

WHEN a New York murder trial
ends in the acquittal of the accused
it is sigifcent fact that, though
he is adjudged innocent, the police
do not waste time trying to fasten
the crime on any one else.
Graham guardian., 1901-07-05

CONE to think of it is not 50
strange that the czar can not lind
a boy to succeed him. The aver
age boy of today has too much
sense to tackle such a tough job.
Graham guardian., 1901-07-05

THE Great Father at Washington
is conducting regular lottery
scheme in disposing of the lands OF
the Kiowa and Comanche Indian
reservation. But the Great
Farther does not allow anybody
else to put up vacant lots as lottery
prizes.
Graham guardian., 1901-07-05
RATES OF LEGAL ADVERTISING.

A magnificent artesian well has
lust been struck near Holbrook. 1t
throws a stream eighteen feet in
the air.-GloJe Times.
Graham guardian., 1901-07-05

Examine photographs of head
stones and monuments, also sam
pies of marble and granite at G. F.
Pascoe's undertaking parlors. Mr..
Pascoe is agent for the Geo. w
Clark artistic monuments and head.
stones. lott.
Graham guardian., 1901-07-05

Mr.. Clarkson has a thoroughly
equipped harness and saddle shop.
Call on him. 9tf.
Graham guardian., 1901-07-05
REAL ESTATE.

Parties wishing 10 rent or sell
land, should list it with us. We
have inquiries nearly every day
from strangers comiug in for land.
The larger list and greater variety
of properties we haye to offer the
more aalss ean be made. Follow
is Il list Of property now on the
market, among them will be found
some good bargains:
A well improved block In the
business center of Stafford for sale,
A good investment.
Town lots we'll located from $50
up on easy payments.
"A acres of land, 3 room brick
house and brick cellar. well, gran.
cry, 35 acres in grain and alfalfa.
Plenty of water in good bitches.
3 miles from Pima, 4 mile from
school.
$40 Acre farm tor sale, 400 acres
river bottom. All under fence,
pearly all bottom land cleared.
Water in three canals. The finest
stock ranch in the ella Valley.
New five room house, 2 "a acres
land with good fence, l-2 acre in
alfalfa, young orchard, good stable
and other improvements, for sale
In Stafford.
a good four room house, "a
acres land we'll fenced, good well
and young orchard for sale in
Stafford.
240 acre farm, quarter mile north
of Thomas, Graham Co., Ariz 120
acres in cultivation, 80 acres in
alfalfa, two.thirds fenced. 4 acres
bearing orchard, apples, pears,
plums, peaches and aprlcots. Cor
raj and outbuildings water in three
bitches. Nearly all land tillable.
II is one Of the best farms in the
Gila valley,
Must be sold within ten days, a
fine improved one and a quarter
acre lot, two-story house, one hun.
dred fruit trees and other improve.
ments. In tho edge of Stafford.
Buss & Birdno have just been
authorized to sell two, 200 acre
farms between Stafford and Solo,
knoxville. They will be sold to-
getber or separately. Both of them
are under cultivation, and have the
the best water rights obtainable.
They are frst-class investments.
Graham guardian., 1901-07-05
WHO Is MY NEIGHB0RG

1t is getting to the point where the
American people are living entirely
for self and are even neglecting the
little amenities due to social life.
Especially is that last true oflarge
cities. Speaking of the neighborly
telling that exists between people
who live near each other, the New
York Sun says:
This is feeling which scarcely
grows in cities. The persons who
live near you may be your neigh
bors technically, but they are no
more to you or you to them than
your accidental neighbors in a
Broadway car. Neighbors in ap-
artment houses may go for years
without knowing or caring to
know one another's names.
Doubtless there are good reasons
for this indifference and this caution
which sometimes make the more
communicative westerner little
impatient when he first settles in
this town. A great city, great
solitude; the saw is true where
there are so many millions. Units
do not count. Indeed, CHIEF
advantage of city is the chance il
gives everybody to follow his own
way of life without question
Everybody or almost everybody
insulates himself save from his
friends. Perhaps a secret fear o.
being buncoed mingles with al
this natural or acquired indifference
to the crowd. Besides a great city
is continual performance, per
petual show. 1t is good to look a
but you don't necessarily care fol
the names Of all the actors on th'
bill.
A big hotel is sort of mirror o
the varied and self sufficing life il
New York. Mrs. Richard Roe il
giving a ball on this floor; there ii
a meeting in behalf of home mis-
sions on the next floor, and righ
above it a poker party. Herr
there is meeting of automobilist'
and there is o meeting Of vivisec
ton. In the lobby brokers arr
spectulators are deep in Wal
street. A few hundred feet away
from them church music club il
practicing. Diplomatists from
Washington, adventures from
everywhere, foreign noblemen
promoters, politicians. millionaires
sneak thieves, honeymoon couples
cranks, all sorts Of people are OF
hand. There is tremendous
amount Of feasting and flirting; anC
up under the roof poor John Do'
with two trained nurses is fighting
pneumonia. And nobody but thu
detectives cares much if at all wha
anybody outside Of his own party
is doing.
But the great cities are spread
ing the disease. In nearly every
hamlet and village lines are being
drawn in a social way; sets are be
ing formed and people pay little OF
no attention to other who live out
side of the set. In fact association
is being limited to "me and my
wife, my son John and his wife, us
four and no more" This is 6
idea. 1t is true that your neighbol
may not have as much money as
you have, but if you will cultivate
his acquaintance and his family's
acquaintance you may find them
courteous people, who will mater
tally contribute to your pleasure
JESTS FROM JUnGE
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1901-01-11

Mr.. Jones announced the night
meeting as "stag party" and he
carried out his promise that there
would be anything but dull time"
He said he talked to his audience of
men on the principle that what he
had found good for himself is good
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1901-01-11

Senegambiau pulls through his shirt
front Gas from out his stomacb) live
hen that goes over the counter fol
candy; or the negro preacher, with
all the serenity of one of the true
DIS in using his nose-wipe, reaches
around and pulls from his continen-
tai coat-tail pocket 25 cent hen and
slaps her on the counter for his flask
of whlskey. Here we have the uses and
abuses of the hen, but ell go to
show her value.
know no reason why the hawk
should be trotted, or, say sailed, out
as thing of value and beauty un-
less it be on the theory of the law of
assimilation. Apart from the do
mesticated fowl, where are our beau
tiful and really valuable birds of
field and forest but gone through
the assimilatiDg digestion of the
insatiate hawk. The few left-the
wren, the blue bird, the gray spar
row, the meadow lark-hardly dare
to show their heads and the partridge
becomes a sneakipg wood bird in
seeking security from the hawk.
And to clap it all, the hawk is such an
Anglomaniac he gives no recompense
by killing off the English sparrow.
Should not this loss be stopped,
and our true bird friends be pro-
tecteds Certainly, as you and l say.
How? AS you suggest, by a public
bounty on hawks and hawks eggs.
We of this or other counties are able
to fight the battle alone. No need
to call on Mr.. Jones for an appro-
priation as the boys out West are
doing on their congressman in their
fight on the grasshopper and prairie
dog. WM. Y. CHINN.
Litwalton, Va.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1901-01-11
UNBIASED.

He that has no enemies needs a
tonic.
The man who doesn't want to talk
about himself has shady past.
A genius finds it difficult to OBJ
tain recognition unless he is about
three parts vagabond.
The small man who sits back
sneering at the great gives the monkey
IN the jungle no credit for making
faces at the distant lion.
A pretty woman's smile causes "a
commotion in the heart of blind
man ninety years old.
The man who is going to quit
gambling as soon he gets even with
the game is like the fly on the sticky
paper. 1t intends to go away as soon
as it gets loose Chicago Times.
Herald.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1901-01-11
Peculiar Phraseology.

In Texas a man once advertised for
''a boss hand over 5000 sheep that
can speak Spanish fluently." Then
there was the horse dealer who bold
ly advertised: ga splendid gray
horse, calculated for o charger, or
would carry lady with switch
tall" A member of a well-known
club was standing on the steps of
his clubhouse when stranger APP
preached and asked: "Does a man
belong to your club with one eve
named Walker?" 81 don't know"
was the answer" what's the name of
his other eye?" An advertisement
contains the request for ga coachman
to look after pair of horses of re-
ligious turn of mind"
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1901-01-11

Old papers for sale at the CITIzES
Office for go cents hundred.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1901-01-11

for them, and what is bad for hin
self is bad for them.
i "We are all alike" he said, san
you'd be surprised how much yo
are like every rascal in this town.
GA mans wife has as much rigb
to go into saloon or to swear as b,
has. If you want to know wha
cussin' sounds like go home and ge
your wife to whack off few words
"The essence of true manhood il
to stand by every woman as if sh,
was bis mother, wife or daughter. Il
there is a hell darker and deeper thar
any other it is for the man who
debauches his clerk, typewriter OF
any girl put in his charge.
''Some people thirk beer is a tenn
perance drink. The brewers start a
fellow and the distillers pickle,
drench and damn him.
"a fellow has got to get drunk oc-
casionally in Baltimore to be gen.
tleman but if | have got to be drunk
to be gentleman I'd rather be a
plain, bob-tailed yellow dog.
"The $500 saloons in Baltimore
tell the tale. A lot of you poor
devils must be hittin' it and pretty
often at that.
81 don't believe 6rst-class fool
will drink whiskey; you have to get
down among the tenth-grade fools to
find a fellow who will monkey with
it at all. You've got your number
now.
NAMBY-PAMBY CHRISTIANS.
"Too many namby -pamby Chris
tians are arguing-the doctors that
it will hurt their practice, the
grocers that it will spoil trade, the
bankers that it will affect their
deposits If they say anything against
liquor drinking. You little devils,
L can put a thousand of you in my
vest pocket. If / was running g.
soap factory in hell and they came
along with you I'd say take that
carcass along. I've got nothing to
deodorize it with
eff solemn preaching would save
Baltimore she would have had her
wings long ago. Every preacher in
town is preaching solemn tonight
and the people are going to he'll u
mile a minute.
"There is not so much difference
between being poor aud being rich;
only the difference between being
hungry and having the collie.
"There amt a pup on the ontinent
that don't get its eyes open in nine
days. Yet some of you old sinners
amt got your eyes open yet"
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1901-01-11
WOOD AND TIES WANTED.

10000 cords Poplar Wood and 10000
Chestnut Ties wanted. Delivered either
on shore or vessel. Advance payments
made it satisfactory arrangements can
De MADE. JAS. M. STUBBs,
Glenns, Gloucester Co., Va.
Q. III. ANDERToN, Saluda, Va,
Agent for Northern Neck
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1901-01-11
NUMBER a..
CHANCE FOR A GOOD BUSINESS

A complete outfit for bottlipp soda
waters and soft drinks, which cost sever
al thousand dollars, will be sold cheap.
IN good order, nearly as good as new.
This is chance for hustler TO make 100
per cent annually on his investment.
Address VA. CITIZEN.
Irvington, Va.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1901-01-11
TRIUMPH OF A MOTHERS
LOVE.
With Her Daughter Half Starved
She Took Milk With Which to
Nourish Her.
Richmond Netcs.)

(RichmoRd Netcs.)
A poor, little white woman, will
peaked face and soiled and ragged
black dress, trying to hide her heac
from the curious crowd in the polio,
court.
In little home on south Spring
street, girl of twenty-one, sick unt tc
death, and four younger brother.
and sisters grieving for the shabb,
little woman in the police court, anc
telling each other that they were al
disgraced for life.
1t is one of these cold, hard
poverty, winter stories.
The little mother, driven TO de
spair, and seeing her eldest chile
almost dying from disease and lacl
of nourishment, got out of her scant
ily-covered bed before the break Of
day and stole the milk from a neigh
boris porch.
Another neighbor complained ol
his lost milk, and the milkman lait
a trap for the thief. Instead oi
catching the big, black brute prowlel
of the night, or the thin, hungry
sneak who spends half of his life il
Jail, this peaked-faced women in tn,
shabby black dress was caught.
1t was a pitiful sight, and NOR,
pitiful story this morning. Hel
little share in the human comedy fol
the morning was full of bitterness
despair and sorrow. The thin, whit,
face of the mother was wet with
tears; and her head ached all tn,
time as only the head of woman ir
distress can ache.
MOTHERS LOVE,
The mother said that her children
would be disgraced. That she saori
feed the last thing worth having
her hones,y-wili not in the eyes ot
good people disgrace her, but will
cause them to respect her.
One woman, a neighbor, was The
only friend she had when hel
case was called, but not half of tn,
story was told when Justice Crutch
field was her friend, and Attorney
Maury and Glenn were also with hel
to help and try to take the sting ot
justice from the law as it is written
Before the case was tried q petition
for pardon was written to Governor
Tyler, and then when it was seer
that she would not be imprisoned fol
her crime, she was sentenced as
petty thief. This was done to sticl
to the law. The pardon was peti.
toned to rise above it, and granted
Mrs. Hutcheson told reporter Of
the Richmond Nes0s that she was .
widow. Her husband died thre,
years ago leaving her without cent
He had been in the employ of tn,
city. Since then her mother ha.
furnished her with house rent, ant
she and her children have scuffiet
hard and long for the necessities O
life.
ait was because my child had tt
have something to nourish her tha
| stole the milk" she said; 81 wa
driven to it,"
Mohave County miner., 1901-12-14
Homestake Group of Mines Sold

A one-half interest in the Homestake
group of mines, in the Gold Road
country, was this week sold to r. i
Holmes, of Phenix, for 15,OO0s. The
group comprises three claims on the
celebrated Hardy lode. While the
price paid is large one for an unde.
veioped property it must be remem
oered that the veins are large and we'll
defined, ranging in width from eight to
hfty feet and outcrops for distance
OF 5000 feet. The formation is quart
zite and porphyry. Mr. Holmes is a
mining man of experience, having
mined over large portion of the west.
ern country. He has made business
OF purchasing promising pros poets and
developing them. He has deposited
sufficient funds in bank to sink shaft
to depth of 100 feet aud crosscut the
vein at that depth. The section in
which the group is located is one of
the best in the river country.