Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1901-02-27


writes poetry because nobody can stop
him. m."-Chcago Record.
A Dreadful State of Affairs He
Well, we can't believe more than half
we hear. She-Oh worse than that;
| can't believe more than half say
Life.
rs the bosp inT' asked the stranger,
entering the drug store. NO" replied
the absentminded clerk; "but we have
something Just as good."-Yonkers
Statesman.
Corrected,-Lady Tourist doing the
Cathedral of Scotland)-This Is Gothic,
isn't it, John? Juvenile vendor of
Guides (seyerely)-No, mem; this Is
esbyterian.-Punch.
Cause and Effect-"No wonder Gill
sey is good natured. Everything comes
his way" Perhaps everything comes
his way simply because he Is good ma
tured. Boston Transcript.
Jester-There's one good thing about
an ice trust-it can't afford to shut up
shop like the mill trust, for instance.
"VhhihS w ny Nuh II! Jtstci- Nuys
the iced melt.-ohio State Journal.
Did you ever hear anything against
his honestly" mo, suh," answered Mr.
Erastus Pinkley. But he eats chicken
mighty reg'lar on Sunday an he's allus
got an umberell when 1t rains "-Bostop
Herald.
Right IN His Line.-"The first Ameri-
can to enter Pckln was soldier-mu-
stefan who scaled the wall" "Well,
say, a musician ought TO be an expert
Plain Dealer.
He Qn his wrnth)-When | married
you had no Idea what n fool you were.
She Qn her equanimity)-The fact that
| was willing to marry you should have
removed all doubts on that point.-Bos-
ton Transcript.
The Indignant Citizen.-"Don't drag
my name into print in connection with
this absurd affair."" cried the indignant
citizen: "but if you do, be sure to spell
out my middle name in full."--Cleve-
land Plain Dealer.
A Rise In Life: Casey-Since the
Hoollhans got rich, l sh'pose they're
t'rown' on all kinds av shtole. Muir
phy-I sh'd say so! They've changed
th' goats name to Nannette, b'gob.-
Baltimore American.
"Stimson is a mean man." "Why
so| He's got way of keeping his
wife from going through his pockets
for loose change" 'How's that?" He
spends it all before he gets home."-
Cleveland Plain Dealer
! Resting His Eyes.-Exchange Editor
/ am sorry to say my eyes have gone
, back on me, and can't read any more.
Can't you give me something else to
do? Managing Editor-You might do
book reviews.-Exchange.
Very Aggrayating: Wife-Oh, doctor!
will John pull through? Doctor-Can't
say, maam The crisis will not arrive
for at least a week. Wife-Oh, dear!
And that bargain sale of mourning
goods ends to-morrow.-Judge.
Miss Blink and l hadn't seen each
other for nine years. "The meeting
must have been interesting" "Yes;
she reminded me that when l visited
her nine years ago l carried off her
whisk- -broom."-Chicago Record.
Clark--I wonder how a man feels
when he finds himself hopelessly bank
rupt. Clerk-Say, didn't your wife
ever insist upon having the Dress
| ,ol. IL, 30, ,olra bar Foil lafh tsxh
after getting home from the seashore?
Life.
Quickly Told.-Friend-What was
your graduation essay about? Mabel
what the Astronomers Know About
Mars" Dear me! Why did you choose
that subjects" Because l didn't have
time to write much."-New York
Weekly.
The Cheerful Idiot, 81 WONDER" said
the shoe-clerk bOarder, why they call
it mistletoe?" ut is so called because
the niss'll toe the mark every time she
sees bit of 1t suspended 1t anywhere"
said the Cheerful Idiot.-Indianapolis
Press.
Tommy-Pa, what does disagree"
mean? Pa-Well, when two people
think alike they are said to agree.
Now, you can guess what disagree"
means. Tommy-O, yes, that's when
only one people thinks alike.-Philadel-
phia Press.
Scandal: "She seems to me one Of the
most distingulshed-looking young
women in Boston!" "They tell dreadful
stories about herr "Indeed?" "Yes,
they say, for instance, that the lenses
of her spectacles are plain glass, with
no magnifying power whatever"
troit Journal.
"Did you ever get religion?" asked
the revivalist. "Well, should say SO
-13S pounds Of It," replied the man.
"a hundred and thlrty-eight pounds Of
religionv cried the revivalist. How
did you get thatr "The only way that
a good many men ever get religion"