The San Francisco call., 1901-12-06
WATTERSoN'S PLATFORM.

= INCE Colonel Watterson decided to cease being
Warwick and concluded to be King; since he
- looked upon the Governors he has made and
called them bad and decided to be Governor himself
he has gone into retreat, far from the sound of the
distllery whistle when gives shrill notice that the
worm is in order, and remote even from the tee-
phone bell which heeds hours and has set time
or season.
In this seclusion our interesting Mahatma is think
ing out Democratic party, conducting it to glorious
victory and handing down party, victory and all the
Offices and munments OF power to the Swamis that
watch by night on the political plains below his
perch He has selected the constitution of the United
States as the new platform of his triumphant Democ-
racy. He has recently looked that document over,
and after the most careful inspection and trial OF
every section carefully wiretapper tries the
underpinnng OF train decides that is good leather
and any party that takes it for platform will go
under the wire while the other is foaming down the
backstretch.
The colonel seems to think that there can be no
dispute about the constitution and that the party
which adopts entire will have the other the hip
II he will day revisit his birthplace, Washington
City, and go to the law section of the Congressional
library he will find bewildering array of books con-
tanning the decided by the Supreme Court to
settle disputes the meaning of the constitution
He will discover that different constructions of his
proposed platform have generated legal controver-
sizes over Federal and State rights, person and
property and cover the whole range of the science
of law, from admiralty to eminent domain from the
dominion of the to dominion OF the land He
will find that, from the beginning, members of the
same party have differed about the meaning of the
constitution, and members of different parties have
agreed with each other.
After he has looked over the index of all these
volumes and read several syllabi he will conclude
that all differences of construction have been recon
ciled by the court and will cry, GO to! What if
my countrymen have been dull of apprehension and
have differed about this the court has made it all
clear, and damned be he who cavis furtherw But
If he will go the Capitol he will find sitting in the
old Senate chamber, in dim, religious light, nine
gentlemen arrayed in black silk gowns cut full in the
skirt. He stands before the Supreme Court of the
United States in its working dress. Before it is
docket 50 long that it is never cleared and finished
filed with cases arising in differences of opinion and
construction of that constitution. He will see
the bar of that court the legal talent of the coun-
Try arrayed, giant against giant, mighty conten-
ton about what his platform means Then he will
go back to his Himalaya and say, Boys, let's fall
back the familiar homemade article Let us con-
tinue to view with aversion and alarm the policy of
the other party and point with pride to our promise
to pay if win
And that is what il will come to. With that un-
quenchable enthusiasm of youth, which time cannot
touch Colonel Watterson cries out now: "The Dem
ocratic party is nothing it be the party of the
constitution. In that character adequately equipped
and skillfuy marshaled, nothing can resist it. In
Kentucky all is we'll How is it elsewhere? Watch
man, tell of the nightP
Well Henry, outside Kentucky the BOYS continue
to water it little