Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1901-08-30

1
picked q handful of lettuce leaves.
Then she came across the road to the
experimental farm and walked up the
long lane to the house.
"Why, howdy do" she said, as sh.
approached the first of the cages,
"0ur lettuce is so fine that thought
I'd bring ye some over. Amt it
purity night"
Now the garden at the experiment.
al farm is particularly long on let.
tuce. There are three lettuce beds
each of which in its luxuriance is
standing reproach to the other vege'
tables. So the lettuce as a peace of
fering was not success. The lady
of the manor made no answer
"Thank you so much, Mrs. Need
wards James"-this to the assistan,
xperimentalist-"b bring out cage
for Mrs. McEdwards. 1t is a lovely
evening"
But Mrs. McEdwards waited tt
hear no more. Her worst fears were
realized. Her new neighbors were
plainly lunatics. They even wanted
to put her in cage. She scuttled
back across the road like scared
old hen.
The following night there was
great excitement at the amateur eX
perimental farm. After the mos
quitoes had been conquered burglars
appeared upon the scene, thus show
ing that life is constant succession
of conflicts.
1t is not likely that burglar whe
possessed any signs of human intelli'
gence would pick out the experiment
al farm as a likely place from which
to make rich haul. But if he did he
would ind the old house an easy one
to enter. Consequently, somewhat
elaborate preparations have been
made for his reception. The lady Of
the manor keeps beside her bed q
huge farm bell, used in the old days
to call in the farmhands to supper
from the distant fields. Its voice i:
that Of a fire alarm gong raised te
the tenth power. The amateur farm
er himself has a revolver. The re-
volver is kept in one part of the
house and the cartridges in another
so that the rising hope of the repub
lie may not, in small boy fashion, ex'
pertinent with them. Thus armed
the family feels itself ready for any
foe.
On the-night in question the ANA
teur farmer was wakened by the
shrill and brazen clamor of the gong
The lady of the manor was waving il
frantically in both hands.
whats the matter?" asked the
amateur farmer.
Burglars! They have light
downstairs. Listen You can heal
them moving around the house."
The amateur farmer advanced te
the head Of the stairs. Plainly in the
lower regions he could see the glim
mer of light and hear the creakina
of doors. In his deepest bass voice
with the tremolo stop pulled out te
the limit, he demanded: "Who's
there?"
There was no answer. Only the
light suddenly went out and another
door creaked. Then the lady of the
manor again let. loose the brazen
thunders of the farm bell. 1t sound
ed as if three Ali fires had been lei
loose in the same block. Then armed
with an empty revolver and a heavy
hand mirror the assembled family
slowly descended the stairs, the gong
still doing its worst.
Below stairs all doors leading tc
the kitchen were found open, but
neither door nor window opening on
the outside had been disturbed, mol
was ary trace of a burglar found
Finally, coming from the dining-rooIr
closet were heard sounds of sup
pressed sobs and convulsive swallow
ings. With great effort and against
desperate resistance from within the
door was finally pulled open.
1t was the COOK lady. Between
snivels she told the story.
81 bane drsty an go me down
stairs to get me trink of water. Den
dot bell ring an you yells: Who is
dot?' an ] dinks aboud dot revolver
an | get me in de closet an make de
door shut. bane so scarf" and re-
pewcd and embarrassing sobs broke
out.
just then rapid hoof beats sounded
on the road leading to the barn. In
The moonlight old Mazeppa, most re-
spectacle Of phaeton horses, was
seen rushing towards the road with
a man on his back He was stopped
by shouts just as he turned into the
main road. The man was the assist
ant experimentalst. He was accused
of running away from trouble, but he
declares on his word of honor that he
was simply and naturally going for
the police.-Chicago Tribune.
Finds Relatives Are Dcnd.
y. r. Widtmer, who left his home
in Owensboro KY, 20 years ago, and