The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1901-11-07

She Threatening breach OF promise
suit)-Do you intend to deny, sir, that
you proposed to me? He-No; intend
10 plead insanity--Fun-
Aren't you the beggar that I gave
pie to last week p Il guess l am. mum,
but I'm wIllin' to let bygones be by
cones. 1t amt in my heart to bear no
malice"
Borem-Scribbler. they tell me. is
now quite literary light must call
on him. Wigwag- Even a literary light
may be out when you caIL-PniIadel-
phia Record
The Don-And what part did you
take in this disgraeeful proceeding Of
holding Mr.. Waters under the pumpG
Undergrad (modestlyl-His left leg.
sir.-Tit-Bits.
~John, how dare you come home at
one o'clock in the morning?" "W-w-w-
by. Mary. you can't 'spect me to stay
out all night on doliar'n forty cents
Denver Times.
Twas Ever Thus: "Oh, yes. he adores
me. I've known 1t for a fortnight"
Then what's bothering your" whats
bothering meg Why, I've got to wait
for him to find it outF'-Brooklyn
Life.
Billtop-You must be doing mighty
we'll. old man, to be able to charter a
yacht. Capton-Not at all; I'm doing it
to save money. ~How's thatg' I'm
going to keep my wife at sea for a
whole month"
Daisy-What do you think? Clarice
went out and sang at an entertainment
in a private insane asylum. Edie-Did
she say whether they showed their in
sanity much2 Daisy-Oh. yes; they en-
cored her three times.
Mistress-Nurse. you really ought to
use a thermometer in baby's bath to get
the right warmth Nurse tairily)-O,
that's all right If the waters too 'ot
he turns red; if it's too cold he turns
blue. That's all you want to know,
ml-English Humor.
1T is sad to see this mercenary spirit
so fagrantly manifested in politics"
said the earnest citizen. Yes" an
swered Senator Sorghum L have
fought against it all I could, but it's
no use. can't get people to vote my
way without payin' em."-Washington
Star.
Mistress Cto cook)-But why do you
want to leave. Mary7 Cook don't ike
the cookery, mum. Mistress-Why, you
cook the things yourself! Cook-Yes,
know, mum. but I'm only a plain cook:
and l thought when I came here that
you would make some tasty dishes now
and again, mum.
Magistrate am told that you have
already been convicted fourteen times
on this same charge. Aren't you asham-
ed to have TO acknowledge to thatl
Prisoner-NO, your worship. l don't
think no man oughter be ashamed OF
is convictions. Magistrate-Tw0
months, without the option Of a fine
Pick Me-Up.
Its a little annoying to have to get
I'D in the middle of the night and look
for burglars" said Mr.. Meekton, ''eut
Henrietta seems to enjoy having me
do So" What would you do il you
really found a burglarg' Well I'm So
kind-hearted that I'm afraid that
would be too lenient think I'd open
the door and tell him that if he didn't
get out quietly Henrietta would come
down and attend to his case"
He was thoroughly happy when he
entered the front door with a package
in his hand and exclaimed: "Ive got
something here for the woman l love
better than all the world" John" she
said sadly, Il don't object to extrava-
gance ordinarily, but do object to you
buying expensive presents for the
cook" But then, you see, she judged
him by his appetite. not his heart
Denver Times.
A Georgia singer complains that the
printer murdered his verses in a cur
rent publication. He says that he
wrote:
A little wife to wait,
In the rosy twilight late,
With the blooms-thick at the gate.
But the stanza appeared in print as
follows:
A little wife to wait,
In the rosy twilight late.
. With the broomstick at the gate.
} Atlanta Constitution.
Pat had secured lodgings In the town
and gone to bed early. The wind was
blowing a terrific gale. and. as the
house did not stand very securely. the
landlord was rather anxious about its
safety. He sent a servant to arouse
Pat. who was sleeping soundly- When
at last the sleeper awakened be sat up
in bed and rubbed his eyes. What's
the matter7" he asked. Don't you
hear the wind?7 asked the servant.
Were afraid the house win blow