davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Penn's Grove record., 1901-12-27
DISCOMFORT
AFT ER MEALS

Feeling oppressed with a sensation of
stuftiness and finding the food both to dis,
tend and painfully hang like heavy
weight at the pit of the stomach are
symptoms Of Indigestion. With these the
sufferers will often have Constipation In
Head, Acidity of the Stomach, Nausea,
Heartburn, Headache, Disgust of Food,
Gaseous Eructations, Sinking or Flutter
ing of the Heart, Choking or Suffocatiug
Sensations when in a. lying posture, Dizzi.
ness on rising suddenly, Dots or Webs be,
fore the Sight, Fever and Dull Pain in the
Head, Deficiency of Perspiration. Yellow
Side, Chest, Limbs and Sudden Flushes oi
Heat A few dnses Of
The Penn's Grove record., 1901-12-27
Capsicunl Vaseline
put ur In coIIansjble TuheS

Substitute for and Superior TO Mustard or any
other plaster. and viii not blister the most delica
sir. The pain allayiRg and curative qualities Of
this arti le wonderful. II twil stop the othA he
at once. and relieve headache and ssiatics.
We recommend n ths best and safest external
oounter-rrltent known, slso an external remedy
FOR pains in the chest and stomach and ali rheumatic
neuralgia and souty complaints.
trial will prove what we claim for 1t. and II will
be found to be invaluable in the household. Many
people say at Is thebest of all Your preparations"
Price. 8 cents, at all druggists other dealers,
or by senSihs this amount to us ia rostase stamps
W. will send you tube by mail.
No article should be accepted by the public unless
the same carries our label, otherwise 1t Is moi
genuine
CHEESEBR0UGH MANUFACTURING co.,
II State Street, Now YORK City.
The Penn's Grove record., 1901-12-27

FITS permanently cured. Motifs or nervous
ness after first days use OF DR.. Kline's Great
Nerve Rsstorer. $2trial bottle and treatise free
DR.. r. H. KLINE, Ltd, 931 Arch ST., phila. Pa,
The Penn's Grove record., 1901-12-27

Woman's crowning glory is sometimes
her hair, but more often her hat.
The Penn's Grove record., 1901-12-27

knowledge is power except i'll the case
of a man who knows he's been whipped.
The Penn's Grove record., 1901-12-27

Fortune smiles on some OF us, and gives
the rest of us the laugh.
The Penn's Grove record., 1901-12-27

ed a wheat has been
p ledbut it has i'm
beh or two. The
: able reduction
A &is Is favorable
a. emand for dc
The Penn's Grove record., 1901-12-27

The only reason some people don't make
fools ri themselves is because the opportu'
nifty ls lacking.
The Penn's Grove record., 1901-12-27
The PENIS Grove Record
Lsts Wholesale Prices Of Country
Proaucs Quoted IN New York.

The Mix Exchange price for standard
quality Is SIC. per quart.
The Penn's Grove record., 1901-12-27

ct tho Age of lao Yeers.
Lylat Cherry died at West
Ga.. at the age Of 120 years.
The Penn's Grove record., 1901-12-27

| has just beenlh
ment Of Agri@
of Manitoba l%
that the totg4
S5.179, $50
Wheat, SOD.
796,5Ss busAeS
266. 420; rye.f
The averaGS|
whess M.1;fn'
max. 1877; ryGy
The total ~
province wasl
2.925,362. TA@
ucts amountdd|
The poultrtil<
year by farm ne
keys. 77,22 pin
1905. Z q
The s fngi
piledf ling' NJ
the our I'LL
par( Qhe siss cnl
I 81 1 What
The Penn's Grove record., 1901-12-27

SsSm@sssssS,s'yss'9sfES
proved within Al
prospect Of a cod 4
of the Argentine 4
lor q we'll SUSTAINED
nestle wheat. ,
The Penn's Grove record., 1901-12-27

Potatoes, Maine, per sack.
N. Y. State, per sack.
Sweets, MI, per Dbl.
Onions, State, per bsg-..-
Orange Co., per bag. .;,..
Connecticut. red, per Dbl
Cabbaees, L. 1, per l00,.,.
Turnips. per Dbl
String beans, per basket.
Egg plant, per box. .......
Squash, per Dbl. -.-...s:
Tomatoes, pen carrier ..-..s
,cuegY,bers, par crate -,
The Penn's Grove record., 1901-12-27

Boot and shoe l
ally busy on ord
them employed
come, but new
lively quiet. 4
The Penn's Grove record., 1901-12-27

Finished iron and III
remarkably good doA
usually dnlr stage Of \
large amount Of IL
books for delivery Ees
months Of 1902. The *
throughout. I
The Penn's Grove record., 1901-12-27

The TrnZ u fHFEt 5eCIIUl
No slackening faee The caus'
tivity of prodfcfI nSAnot be obtained
but In many a #witl1ssary ingredien
going forward n We tiof Virginia.
mum rate underI &arnii
orders rather thai 't9anytuation.
tions to the bust FAY d aparent in the ac
ers and jobbers. EN- denand distribution
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1901-04-24

A little 4-year-old was taken on
a visit to grandmamma in the country.
There for the first time he had n view
of cow. He would stand and look on
while the man MIXED and ask all man
ner Of questions. In this way he learn
ed that the long crooked branches on
the cows head were horns. Now, the
little fellow knew of only one kind Of
horn, and a few days after obtaining
this information, hearing strange kind
of believing noise in the yard, he ran
out to ascertain its cause. In a few
minutes he returned with wonder and
delight depicted ON his countenance. ex-
claiming: Mamma, mamma! oh, do
come out hereI The cows blowing
her Eornsv'-Exchange.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1901-04-24
Allowed Plenty of Time.

Speaking of the late William T>ravers
leads me to remark that, so far as l
am personally aware, only one of the
classic suffering stories about him is
actually true. | had the honor and
happiness to reside at Newport for n
year or so once. and at the time Mr..
Travers was ii summer resident there.
He certainly suffered n good deal, but
he did not go around habitually dis
charging staccato witticisms at the
world, as you might suppose he did
from all the stories you hear. But the
one story that 1 know about is this
one:
Travers was at a garden party one
afternoon when a young lady said to
him, What time is it, please, Mr..
Travers?"
Travers took out his watch, wabbled
his mouth awhile, blinked and finally
said, It'll be s-s-s-s-siX oc-c-c-c-clocll
by the time l can say it!'
1t really lacked five minutes of 6
when he began.-Boston Transcript
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1901-04-24
SunnY Rooms.

1t is said to be true that in all hOspi-
tails those rooms facing the sun have
fewer deaths. other things being equal,
than those which are on the shady side
of the house. Likewise statistics, where
they have been kept, prove that the av-
erage time for n recovery is much less
in n sunny room than in a shady one.
From these facts and from the fact
that the tendency toward illness has
proved greater on the shady side of
buildings. like prisons and asylums. it
follows that light is second only in i'm
portance to fresh air. A dark room is
nearly but not quite so bad as n close
room. In the case of sickness the sick
room should be the sunniest one the
house affords.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1901-04-24
UNCLE SANS Spoilers.
Especially the Mnn In Europe Who
Looks Ont For Snsugglers.

Especially the Mnn In Europe Who
Looks Ont For Snsugglers.
"Uncle Sans large and well organ
lied secret service" says S. II. Adams
in Ainslee's. lis made up mostly of
men who come properly under the
head of detectives with police powers,
but it has it's class of bona fide spot
ters, whose entire duty it is to ingrati-
ate themselves with persons suspected
of having designs to evade the custom
house duties and to warn the baggage
inspectors at this end of the impend-
ing swindlC.
I'm cleverness, address and adapta-
bility the secret service spotter is east
~ at the Head of his profession and
even ranks with the trained experts of
the European diplomatic corps. 1t is
essential that he should be a man of
the world, for he must associate with
all kinds of people on equal terms. He
has no fixed abode, but lives in va
riOus European capitals when he is
not on shipbOard, where he is much of
the time. He must never let himself
be in the slightest degree suspected.
"There is always number of these
agents in Paris, because of the great
American trade there. They live at
the fashionable hotels and live the life
apparently of fianeurs and boulcvar-
diers. In all lines of trade that concern
dutiable goods they are experts, and
no large purchase by an American in
Paris is unknown to them. Their cir
Gle of acquaintance is enormous, but
nobody knows them for what they are.
In one way or another they contrive
to make the acquaintance of any per-
son whom they suspect and unOstenta-
tiously but unremittingly trail him.
MANY n time some man who has
made n heavy purchase of diamonds
or laces and so disposed them that
he felt sure of being able to get them
through the port undiscovered has
been passed. on the dock by Il chance
acquaintance of the voyage over who.
unseen, presses n little note into the
hand of the customs inspector. That
note tells all that the willy smuggler
would wish to keep secret, and his
baggage is mercilessly ransacked until
the hidden articles are brought to
light. He has been followed over by
the spotter. Men,employed in this line
get good pay-as high as SO a day
but it costs them much to live in the
manner in which they must main
tain themselves"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1901-04-24
KISSES.

With little kisses shut your eyes;
would not have them seeing and wise.
For, could choose, would have you De
Blind ever, now, when you look on mel
4 wreath Of kisses TO crown your head,
That the whole worlds crown should adorn N
stead.
To keep your thought Of me ever kino,
As now, when your darling eyes are blind.
In each of your hands shut kiss
DO you feel how soft and little it Is!
So hold it gently that it may live,
Lest your hands ask more than ny hands can give
4 kiss for an earring in each dear car,
And now when ! speak you can only hear
The heart of ny hearts heart laugh and cry,
Not the foolish words it is stifed by.
4 kiss on your mouth, and it bears no charm
To bring you TO good, TO keep you from harm;
IL has mission, yet let it be;
The rest were for you, but this is for me-
Pail Mall Gazette.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1901-04-24

At Whakarewarewa, New Zealand.
there are geysers. hot springs. boiling
pools, mud volcanoes and hot water
falls.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1901-04-24
How She Did IL.

$50 she refused you?"
That's the impression received"
Didn't she actually say no?''
''No, she didn't. All she said wa
'Ha, ha, har ''-Cleveland Plain Dealer
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1901-04-24
unn1.a.nnt Mnnntonx.

Ugly Husband (snarling)-You mar
ried me for better or worse, didn't you =?
Wife hesitatingly)-Yes, but L sup
posed I would have some variety
Detroit Free Press. ---- -. "a
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1901-04-24

Isn't there n great deal of egotism
among actors?' asked the young wom-
an.
II am sorry to say there is" answer
ed Stormington Barnes. "Why, have
met no less than three actors who
thought they could play Hamlet as
we'll as I Washington Star.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1901-04-24

Santa Claus Is unknown in Spain.
The three Magi are supposed to be the
children's gift bringers.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1901-04-24
Administrators Notice.

Estate of Frank r Bartholomew, deceased.
The undersigned having DeeD appointed ad
ministrator of the estate of Frank r BarthOlo
new. late of the county of Rock Island, state
OF Illinois. deceased, hereby gives notice that
Island county, at the county court room, In
the city of Rock Island, at the May term, or
the first Monday In May next, at which time
all persons having claims against said estate
are notified and requested to attend, for the
purpose OF having the same adjusted.
All persons Indebted to said estate are re-
quested to make immediate payment to the
Undersigned.
Dated this 18th day OF March, A D. 1901
EDWARD Z. BARTHOLOMEW, Administrator
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08

When my naybur's pianer kept me
awake, wanted to go to law about it,
but when de barkin of my dawg kept
him from slumber an he raised row
about 1t put him down as bad man.
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08
THEY WE'RE UNANIMOUS.
The -Four Passengers Knew the Com
pany They Were In.

There were four Of them in the smok-
ing compartment Of the parlor car, and
they glanced furtlvely at each other
and puffed away for ten minutes with
out speaking. Then the baldheaded
man drew long breath and said:
Gentlemen, I should like to con-
verse;"
$50 should T." answered the other
three In chorus.
81 should like to narrate one of my
adventures TO pass the time away"
$50 should l."
"But / am restrained by the fear
nay, almost the certainty--that would
be charged with exaggeration."
$50 are we."
"Not to speak Of being classed as q
liar"
"Just so."
"And therefore, gentlemen, I deem It
best to preserve discreet silence.
$50 do we."
And they smoked and stared into va
cancy and finished their cigars as soon
as possible and got away from each
other. NJ. QUAD.
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08

on the bearT' would you charge ex-
ira for thatfv said the German. "Yes.
That would cost 81 extra" Then l
can't afford to have II done" The art
list departed. That night It ralned, and,
10, In the morning the bear had vanish
ed from the sign! The rain had washed
It away.
The Geman sent for the painter at
once. my bear" he said reproachful-
ly, sis ppne." The other answered,
"Well ! wanted to put chain on It,
didn't II" The German then handed
out SO. 81 for the painting Of another
bear, the .hird for chain to make the
picture permanent.
The chained bear now remains upon
the sign impervious to the weather.
Philadelphia Record.
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08

How Blaine Rcmombered Henderson,
IL was before General Henderson had
been elected 10 congress, and Blaine
was speaker Of the house. Henderson
was in Washington, and naturally
Blaine was one Of the statesmen that
be much desired TO meet. and the op-
portunity came OF a morning Just az
the speaker was passing through the
lobby on his way to the marble ros-
trum. The formal greetings were ex.
changed In brief moment, and Gener-
al Henderson was left to see the swing
ing doors close ON the form Of the Re-
publican leader.
Six years later General Henderson
again came to Washington, this time to
get Iowa divided Into two judicial dis
tricts. He put up at Wormley's, where
Blaine also lived, It being in those days
q fashionable and fiourishlng hostelry.
A week or 80 after his arrival from
Iowa, as General Henderson was en-
tering the dining room, he met Blaine
after having passed and repassed him
many times. ThesMaine man grasped
him cordially by the hand, called him
by name and inquired about Iowa.
II had heard of Senator Blafne's
wonderful faculty for remembering
Names" says General Henderson.
when / had seated myself at the
table, beckoned to the head waiter.
"'Hasn't Mr.. Blaine asked you my
nameP ! said to him. Now think hard
and be sure of your answer
"'Yes. sah,' replied the waiter. He
done called me ovah las night an
asked yo' name an all about yo'. told
him 20 was Mistah Henderson. ~
Washington Post.
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08
VERSE FROM PUCkERvlLLE.

This little farm near Puckorville
Amt much in winter clothes,
But when the blossoms on the bough
An blooms is on the rose, .--..
A.sendin messages 30 sweet,
By ev'ry wind that blown
love her theni
No moneyed men ner capitalists,
No arteries Of trade,
But, oh, the rifles in the crick
Where tired feet kin wade,
An, oh, the lovely ellum trees
An deepest ollum shaded
The fresh smell from the medder landh
The crazy birds that swing;
The "gee haw'' Of the hired hand,
stop to hear him sing
And see the purity colors when
The blackbird's on the wingi
When I'm out airly in the field,
Sometimes feel that
Must jist drop in a furrow an
Lift up my voice an cry
Ny feelin's up to him who senda
These gloriss from the skyl
Oh, I don't write much poetry;
No schoolin have / had,
But inspirations come to me;
My name is johnson Gadd,
One mile from Puokerville; this is
Ny summer boardin ad
sS per day!
indianapolis Sun.
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08
A Rhapsody of Love.

Only we two alone, engaged In bring
Ing about for ourselves the still great
er solitude Of two into one. Oh, be-
loved. what q company that will be!
Take me in your arms, fasten me to
your heart, breathe on me. Deny me
either breath or the light of day. I
am yours equall,, to live Or die at
your word. 1 shut my eyes to feel
your kisses falling 90 me like rain, or
Still more like sunshine-yet most Of
all like kisses, my own dearest and
best beloved. - From an English
Womap's Love Letter."
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08
Evolution of the Apple.

Apples are new in the economy of the
worlds use and taste. At the begin
ming of the last century few varieties
were known, and we can go back in
history 10 a time when all apples were
little, sour and puckery-crab apples
and nothing else. The crab apple was
and Is In its wildness nothing but a
rosebush. Away back in time the wild
rose. with its pretty blossoms that turn
to little red balls. apple favored, and
the thorny crab had the same grand
mother
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08

The eighteenth slot machine to reach
Giveadam Gulch in the last IL months
was shot to pieces Monday night In
Franks gin palace. Civilization will
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08
Needed q Chain.

a story is being told about German
who has a hotel far down town. An
trtist-one of those barroom artists
who make pictures on mirrors with
soap-called on the German the other
day and asked for some work. WELL"
the German said. you might paint q
brown bear on my sign. How much
would you charge to do it?" Two dol
lars" the artist answered. Thereupon
the contract was made, and the bear
was painted.
At the end Of the Job the artist said.
"Don't you want me to paint a chain
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08
REJECTED.
City CONS. Threw Out All Bids
on a Sewer.

All the bids for the Willow and Ex-
change SITS. sewer which were received
Saturday, were rejected by the City
Commissioners Monday. The reason
was that one of the bidders took an
unfair advantage Of the fact that,
because there is already sewer in a
part of the street to be followed, the
new sewer must go at the side of the
street where there will be much less
excavating than the engineers profile
shows. A new profile will be prepared
and new bids received.
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08

carrier for four miles and firing two
dozen bullets over his head, and he
shortened his usual time by over an
hour.
Our esteemed contemporary claims
to have had n narrow escape from
mountain lion over on the Blue hills
last week. When there are 80 many
old rubber boots lying around loose for
lion TO chew on, we cannot zee why
the critter should banker after a cross
eyed editor.
Colonel Dawson, the contractor, has
discovered from a search Of the rec
ords that every man lynched in this
territory during the last ten years has
died smiling and in happy contentment
and he 10 using the fact as an induce
ment for eastern people to emIgrate
this way.
Mr.. William Scott denies that be has
headed a petition TO the postmaster
general to have us removed from our
postmastership because we rode our
~" a. itptt III a IdNt lhst Wtth
and came In three lengths ahead and
won $50 purse. We had to call upon
him with gun before he would make
a public statement, but when he got
to talking he couldn't say enough in
our favor.
Mr. Shayne, the popular and respect
ed druggist, deeply regrets his mistake
In putting up morphine for quinine the
other day and thereby causing the
death Of teamster named Williams.
He was rushed at the time, and the
mistake was natural one, and we
think there has been enough said about
1t. See Mr.. Shayne's new ad. in this
issue.
The eighteenth slot machine to reach
Giveadam Gulch in the last IL months
was shot to pieces Monday night IN
| Franks gin palace. Civilization will
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08

There isn't an iota of egotism in our
make up, but we think 1t our duty to
say that any town engaging us to de-
liver a Fourth of July address for $50
spot cash will get something worth
four times the money. The address
will run for two hours and provoke the
widest enthusiasm. 1t is SO fervid
from beginning to end that there Is no
need of fireworks in the evening.
NJ. QUAD.
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08

When a man finds himself de owner
Of vicious mewl, he at once reflects
dat he was bon 80 an can't help it, but
when he diskibers de same traits about
his feller man he wants him punished
at once bekase he isn't like himself.
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08
Fooled Kidnapers.

They kidnapped Tommy Jiggers.
Some bold and wicked men;
They grabbed the boy one evening
And took him to their den.
They wrote fearful letter,
In which they vowed and swors
'Twould cost ten thousand dollaR
To see the lad once more.
Next day In all the papers
The neighbors advertised.
"Attention. Bold Kidnapersi
You hereby are advised
That II you'll keep young Jiggert
And never send him back
Just twenty thousand dollars
viii come along your tracks
II was some two weeks later
Young Jiggers sauntered I'M
His face was proud and happyJ
He wore a tickied grin.
He bore plaintive letter;
"Take this kid back" It said,
"And here's the twenty thousand.
In three weeks we'd be dead"
It seems that Tommy Jiggers
Had talents that were great.
For from his early childhood
He always could crate,
And while she neighbors rested
In peaceful. calm delight.
The poor, deceived kidnapers
HAd heard the boy recite.
Baltimore American.
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08

A school inspector, having a few
minutes to spare after examining the
school, put few questions to the low
er form boys on the common objects
in the schoolroom.
"What is the use of that map" he
asked, pointing to one stretched across
the corner Of the room, and half a
dozen shrill voices answered in meas
ured articulation:
"It's to hide the teachers bicycle.
sir."-Wasp.
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08

When man has got all ready to go
down to de tax Office an swear off his
personal taxes, muffin puts him out so
much as to have de newspapers come
out an speak of him as an honest man.
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08
He Heard No Protests.

"You have been executing criminals
by electricity in your state for several
years now. How has the system SEEM
ed to work?' asked the chairman Of
the investigating committee.
'Well," replied the prominent citizen,
1--WE have never heard a word of COM
plant from the fellows we have work
ed off that way."-Chicago Tribune.
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08
Right UD to Date.

Abe Chinwhiskers (at the Pan-Ameri-
can)-say, is this here Plaisance bet
tern the Midway at the Chicagy World
fairf
Fakir--Is it! Say, they only had an
ordinary fat woman and living skele-
ton and such like at the fair, while
we've got wild fat woman from Bor-
neo, a three legged living skeleton and
a two headed bearded lady!-Brooklyn
Eagle.
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08

I'D VIC III
Herald.
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08

"Don't some people attend your con-
certs merely to be able to boast that
they saw your
"Yes," answered the great pianist
sadly, land it is even worse than that.
Some do so for the privilege Of saying
they seen NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. Star.
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08
Made Him Nervoun.

Bystander-Don't you feel terribly
nervous when you are away up in the
air?
Parachute Jumper-Yes, IL there's a
small crowd.
what difference does the crowd
maker
I'm afraid won't get my salary
New York Weekly.
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-07-08
In the Literary Throes.

"Was you club paper troublesome,
DorothyY'
"Oh, horrible! ransacked II books
and ate three pounds of chocolate cara
mels while was getting it up."-De-
troit Free Press.