West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1901-02-14
Mr.. BOWSER'S
TRIBULATIONS.
file Strikes New Thing In the Fuel
Line With Poor Results.


~ ing when boy left heavy
sack of something at the base
ment door of the Bowser mansion,
and Mr.. Bowser lost no time in
conveying specimens of it to the
sitting room for Mrs. Bowsers's in
spection. They looked like chunks
of asphalt dug up from an old pave
ment, and she turned from them
with the remark:
al suppose somebody has been
after you again with a patent some
! thing or other"
- ''Have you the slightest idea
what that something or other is ?"
asked Mr.. Bowser, with smile of
complacency.
as it plaster to fix the holes in
the cellar floor ?"
"My dear woman, am not in
the plaster business this evening.
1t is not plaster or compressed food
for the cat. 1t isn't a microbe
killer nor moth destroyer. viii
you kindly listen to me for mo-
ment while l give you few facts
and figures 2"
go on" she said.
"To heat this house and do your
cooking we consume 20 tons of
coal per year. The coal man cheats
us out of at least four tons. That
coal must be dug from the bowels
of the earth, raised to the surface,
loaded on to cars, unloaded again,
loaded into carts and delivered and
even then must be handled again,
to say nothing of the ashes. Can't
you see why it costs so much ?"
"Of course"
owe are only one of 5000, 600
families using coal, and there are
all the shops and factories besides.
Suppose we had substitute for
coal, something which needed
scarcely any handling, gave out
FIVE times the heat and left no ashes
behind What would that subst-
tute be worth to America-to the
world at large ? No dust, no ashes,
no giving 1900 pounds for ton,
no clinkers and no waste"
81 thought you'd been taken in
again." replied Mrs. Bowser, with a
sigh.
ooh, you did? Very kind of
you, indeed Well, my friend, Pm
going to disappoint you this time.
I'm going to revolutionize the fuel
Of the world. Pm going to knock
out coal until ii won't be worth 20
cents a ton. Right there before
your eyes is something which is
going 10 bring me in millions of
dollars in the next few years and
make the name of Bowser a house
hold word all over the civilized
world. Millions, Mrs. Bowser,
millions 7"
And he thrust his thumbs into the
armholes of his vest and walked up
and down before her, and the cat
came out from under the piano and
walked after him.
DWELL ?" she asked to break the
long silence.
well" he replied, 81 will
simply say to you this evening that
/ will heat our house from now on
for 10 cents per week, and will
run a steamboat from New York to
London for s25. I am now going
down 10 the kitchen to experiment
a little with the range. Seeing is
believing and ] may call you in
about half an hour. think III be
able to prove to you that haven't
been wasting my money on a spring
tonic or lightning rod. You've
somehow got the idea that don't
know enough to buy turnips at 90
cents a bushel, but I rather think
III astonish you"
Mrs. Bowser realized that the
experiment would be carried 70
some sort Of finish no matter what
she said, and she therefore held her
peace, and Mr.. Bowser gathered up
bis specimens and descended to the
basement.
'And nov is il another foolin'
around with the hot water pipes or
the gas meter ?" asked the cook,
who knew something Of his expert.
mental nature.
my dear woman, I am going to
astonish and benefit you" replied