The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1901-06-21
SPINNING WHEEL.
DER BEANUTTS MANN.

"Ao', W!eA tue umpire SHOUTS: fIav
Hears with disdain the feeble call,
And whose own stentor-modeled lungs
Drown out the noise of many tongues?
peanuts! Fr-r-r1iSh peanuts"
Who stirs the circumambient air
A A. moves his optics here and there
10 find the man who yells: Here. boy,
Give Inc one sack Of roasted joy!
Peanuts. Fr-r-raish peanuts!'
Who hastens onward with his wares,
While every individual glares
Who lacks the necessary price,
Who cuts a mighty slab of ice?
Peanuts! Fr-r-raish peanuts"
And when we seek our restless beds
With goober COLLINS in our heads,
What Is the awful cry that seems
TO be the burden of our dreams?
peanuts! Fr-r-raish peanuts
Denver Times.
Were you ever paralyzed? said the
old-timer.
NO, and may the" began the other.
well. you see that right hand? 1t
looks pretty good and strong. And 1t is;
but for about three days once it was
deader than frost-bitten tomato plant.
make my living playing cards, chiefly
dealing bank. There wasn't day that
didn't deal bank or in other games six
to eight hours day. Many a time
have dealt or played longer.
"One night l was dealing bank. 1t
l went to slip card this old right re-
fused to work. looked at it and the
fingers were kind of twisted inward and
the hand from the wrist was bent down.
This stopped the deal for me and l
told the lookout to get busy for the
He took my place and watched the bets.
Il rubbed my right, but it wouldn't
straighten out and it kept this way I'M
til the next day, and then l went to
doctor. He didn't know me AS well as
you dc, but the first question he asked
" .R, cards good deal, don't you?'
do you deal with an elbow move
ment or with finger and wrist move
ment?''
Why don't work my elbow
THAT explains it. You have card
player's paralysis
This hit me center, and l showed it,
hut the doctor was good and said:
Now don't get furried. I'll straight
en- You up. Just quit dealing a while
and l will give your hand few doses
He did it. and in about three days
my hand was. as straight as a string.
But | haven't dealt so much since
There's many an old-timer whose dealing
hand has quit him. "-Louisvillc Courier
Journal.
Irving Bachelor, the author of ''Ebcn
Holden" tells with relish of an intended
compliment he received about his book.
says the Saturday Evening Post. He
knows 1t was intended to be kind. but
says he has an inward misgiving that it
was just. ''Ehen Holden had appeared
and the public were beginning to read it.
,1<l0
to know what the public. not the critics,
thought OF the book. But, as he said.
unbiased opinion is hard to get. He went
to a dinner party one night and a very
nice old lady. to whom he was presented,
said to him with earnestness, holding his
hand:
Dear Mr.. Bachelor. l am so glad to
meet the author of 'Eben Holden l
read myself to sleep nights with your
book
The Chinese minister here, writes the
Paris correspondent Of London NJ. A. P,
is one Of the least known of the diplo-
matte corps, as far as 1.-The man in the
street. is concerned, hut he is very popr.
lar in the circles in which he lives. The
fancy-dress fete recently given at the le
CATION in Avenue Hoche was one of the
society events Of the season. In the
course Of the evening the minister dis
cussed the situation in China with few
friends.
Il am reminded" he said. "of one of
the stories in a little collection of anus
ing tales and jokes called in our country
'Tcai-Pao' (The Family Treasurer, pub
lished in 1907, in the reign of Hang Chi.
A certain man. who was reputed to have
much wealth. was attacked one day by
rohher, who cried out:
Hand me over all your money CT
will kill you
It's ai-mi, for that was his name, re-
fused to give the money. and thereupon
the robber seized him and belabored him
without mercy.
"'Now.' he cried again at length, when
me the money!
Let us examine the question, re-
turned T$'ai-mi between his groans
You have half killed me. Would it not
be fair to take only half my money!
Now concluded the minister, that
is the state OF affairs in China.'
"Chi-chi children" began the tind
Il teacher in the Sunday school, "of
course you are all familiar with the story
Of the swallow that whaled Jonah-er-I
mean the SWale that wallOwed JonaE-er
-er-that is. the whale that Jonahed-
um--un!-the follow that wonahed the
SWaie-l mcau-er-lne jail tnIt SWal-
lowed wonah -er - er- gug gug -
(ChokeS.)
II presume. Brother Simms,' said the
superintendent kindly. you mean the Jo-
nah. that swallowed the-er-er-tha;
is
"Yeyes. SIR responded the timid
young man; that is what l mean Tit
Bits
The hartlships of the newspaper bust
ness are revealed in this little dialogue
between shrewd old Quaker woman
and a young Philadelphia member of the
craft, says the Chicago Journal: "Thee's
a newspaper woman. eh?" inquired the
former. after moment or two OF casual
conversation as between strangers.
DO you think I look it, asked the
reporter thinking several vain thoughts
as she smiled to herself.
Yes, thee does" replied the old wcn,-
al.
And what are the signs?' the other
asked.
Why, thee hast that draggy look in
the eyes, was the startling answer