New-York tribune., 1901-12-23
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

Justice Phillemore, of England, the other day
declared that modern churchgoers are 'oncers
not "twicers" while non-churchgoers are either
has beeners' or ''never-wasers
Casey-Av course ofm an Irsh-American. an
why not? Don't OIL live in America?
Cassidy-Oh. yes: OF suppose it's all right
Casey-Av course It is. 49,.
live in England Ye'd be an irish glishman
then wouldn't ve?-Philadelphia Press
A woman physician in England is having hard
fight against rooted prejudice and tradition. Re
Gently the governors of the Macclesfeld Inhrmary
appointed a Miss Murdoch Clark junior house
surgeon Six honorary surgeons thereupon re-
signed after which the governors decided to ask
her TO resign, giving her years salary Sne re-
piled that she fighting the battle of medical
women am declined to resign The governors ao-
iourned.
Say" said the man with the sallow COMPLEXION.
you have plum pudding spelled wrong on your
bill of fare"
''How's that?" asked the proprietor of the lunch
Well it's heavy enough TO be spelled plumb ="
-(Philadelphta Record
"bne of nv children" says writer in Good
Words" was reading to me in her English his
tory how the Mayor killed Wat Tyler. L suppose
IL kicked him. she remarked 1 explained that
the Mayor a man. Oh she said I thought
a mare was an old gray horse My mother told
me that the word 'sIndry.' which she heard in
church in the exhortation. puzzled her much, till
she decided in her own mind it referred to the
hot arid land of Palestine where the Bible was
written-a dry place.
The Man of the House.-strarger-Is the man
of the house in?
let him come out-tNew-York Weekly
A Scotsman who had been employed nearly all
his life in the building of railways in the High
lands of Scotland to this country in his
later years and settled in section the
plains of the Far West. Soon after his arrival a
in
strurtion of a railway through the district. and
the Scotsman applied TO a of expert
ence matters.
'.Hoot, mon!' said he to the spokesman of the
scheme. "ye build railway across this
country
Why not Mr.. Ferguson"
Why not?' he repeated. with air of effectu-
ally settling the whole matter. Why nots Dae ye
no see the country's fiat a floor. and ye
dinna hae ony place whatever to your tunnels
through"
there's a burglar downstairs in the dining room
qst heard I'd 1,.d him rafting tIaaS,i the Si!yer
Listen! That sounds as if he was sampling that
Gee whizzl Wait till 1 get my revolver."-(Phil-
adephia Press.
ut will surprise many people" says The Lon
don Chronicle" Ito hear that Father Ignatius,
who been waging ecclesiastical war against
the new Bishop of Worcester, is sixty-four to-day.
certainly the most picturesque figure in the Church
of England to-day. and whether the mission
platform or that OF the Church congress always
creates sympathy and even enthusiasm by the
vigor and eloquence of his utterances. He stated
in columns the other day that his services
attended chiefly by but In London. at any
rate, women equally attracted by them. His
monastery in the recesses OF the Welsh hills is
very Beautiful place and those who have visited
It describe it ideal refuge from the worries
of the world
sit down" said the fierce man. and the tren-
bling youth obeyed. We'll, what Is it?''
The unhappy young man cleared his throat 81
have come: that is | have come he began in
stammering accents Ito ask you for the hand of
your daughter Ruth"
The old leaned back III his chair and in
tently regarded his visitor. Does my daughter
your he asked
Yes. sir; am sure she does" the youth replied
with some eagerness. she sent you"
The old sighed. The whin.s of that child
really unaccounta ble." he muttered 1T seems
but a day or two ago that she cried for doll Then
1t was pony. Now 1t is a monkey. OF course
she'll have TO have it If she wants it. That's all
Good day."-(Cleveland Plain Dealer.