davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05

Reports to r. G.. Dun & Company
show commercial failures 1886 in the
first quarter of 1901 against 1854 last
year. In amount of liabilities there ap-
pears a decrease; the figures this year
are $31, 703, 4S6, compared with $33,022,-
573 in 1900. Four hundred and forty
one more failures in the first quarter
of this year than in the same period
last year, is not a prosperous showing.
The decrease in liabilities, Slight though
it is, merely shows that more of the
little fellows are being driven to the
wall in these days of monopoly.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05
cENsUs-TAKING IN EUROPE

We have much TO learn from Europe
in matters of government. The old
world is almost as far in advance of
us in the science of practical govern
ment as it is in years.
In the single matter of the census
this fact is especially evident. We all
know what a farcical affair the Amer
lean d~ecennial census is. Aside from
the fact that it is rarely available.
often the entire decade and more be-
ing required to complete it so that
one census is not finished before an
other is begun, it's unreliability is no
~torious. There is not a locality in the
country that does not complain of its
rank and glazing inaccuracies, which
are so great sometimes as to approach
the ludicrous. At the same time the
American census is a tremendously ex-
pensive affair. 1t is a carnival for the
spoils dispenser and the petty office
seeker, and costs the taxpayers mill
ions of dollars for an immense army
of enumerators, appointed by politi-
clans in payment for political service
rendered, and for no other reason. And
these enumerators get through their
work in the easiest possible manner
and with the least possible trouble to
themselves. In view of all of which
is it any wonder that I'LL censuses are
simply grand expensive farces, never
completed when needed, and almost
totally worthless at best?
How differently they do things in Eu-
rope. The census of the British en-
pire, comprising 400, 900, 900 of people,
was taken last Sunday in accordance
with the law requiring the decennial
enumeration to be made March 81 of
the first year of each new decade. This
nsu was taken in a single day SIM
ultaneously in every household through
the kingdom wherever a British sub
ject was found and served with a
blank, which he is required to fill out
under severe penalties. In Canada, for
instance, elaborate preparations were
made for this census from Newfound-
land to Alaska. Lumber, hunting and
mining camps were all included and all
Obliged to make returns on the govern
ment blanks, which were everywhere
distributed. In this census there are no
omissions, and no one is counted
twice, because the people count them
selves. each individual is responsible
and there is no incentive to render
a wrong return. while the penalty for
doing so is heavy.
France took her census March 25 by
the same method, and in the same time.
1t was all done at once, and the work
of the government is merely clerical
in tabulating the returns.
In many matters of government the
new world can go to school to the
old.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05
CONCERNING CATS.

Portland Morning O%regonian.
When melancholy midnight spreads its
wings
Above the roofs that shelter sleeping folk;
And GREATNESS silence reigheth every
where,
Save here and there, where vagrant steps
proclaim
That some poor wight has failed to catch
the car
That starts on its final trip at 12:15-
Save, now and then, a changing engine
AMI rapid puffs that speak the need of
sand
Upon the rails, announce that switching
crews
Are working in the railroad yards all
hight,
IT'S then you feel the need of sweet re-
pose,
And, creeping underneath the coverlet,
Begin to take that long and measured
breath
That is the music for the march to sleep,
When, violating all the s~acredness of
Beneath your windows sounds a how and
yowl,
A hiss, a spit. a dull and heavy thud.
The sound of velvet feet along the walk,
And you arouse TO find you cannot sleep,
Nor choose but listen to the neighbours
cats.
The tortoise shell, the yellow-eyed NAL
The striped tiger cat with half a tail,
The Tom with scars of many a hard-won
fight,
The tabby with a silken bow of blue
About her neck. the Persian pet
OF Croesus' daughter in the other street.
The tawny yellow cat witt one foot gone,
The veteran with notches in his ears
Like saw-teeth-records of d~isgraceful
brawlS-
All these and others most do congregate
In your back yard to argue and to WOO,
To hold debates on matters grave and gay,
To practice Wagner music and to sing,
In varied keys. Herr Schubert's serenade,
But mostly do they fight
In single conflict and in general feud,
With eight or nine combatants TO the side.
Arise the piteous walls that tell of ears
AND claws and nails, from owners roughly
plucked,
To be retained as trophies Of the fight.
You listen, but your ears seek out in vain
The eyes of any single dying groan,
Amid the din, to bring to you the JOY
OF knowing one has persisted in the fray.
For cats. though mortal hurt, Will still
live on
To torture the other seekers after rest.
But ne'er diminish. Though you try and
try
With well-directed missiles to break up
The meeting. they but change their base,
And still howl on, nor do they cease their
strife
| Till soft and changing tints Hume the
East,
| And with pallid dawn the distant scent
OF breakfasts cooking tempts them 10
their homes
To purr and fawn about the skirts OF
cooks,
And stretch and yawn as il but new
awaked
From slumbers co~extensive with the night
why should they gather in your yard?1
you ask.
why mark you. of all others. for their
prey,
And make your back yard fence their
meeting place,
| When other fences in the n~eighborhood
| Are more adjacent to their several homes!
| II you would solve this tangled mystery
And know their motives for the things
they do.
Why don't you 50 inqutrs Of the catsf
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05

time. At tho social session Of the or
der he SO far forgot himself as to drink
a cocktail. The manager was not ex-
pected in the city for some time, and
SO the actor thought he wal safe. As
fate decreed, the manager arrived in
town the same night, and caught Vokes
indulging in his quiet drink. He called
him, and Vokes admitted his guilt. The
latter was reluctant to separate him
self from the 81, 200, but he cashed in
like a man. His manager made out a
bill as follows:
"Mr. Harry Vokes. To E. D. Stair,
manager Ward and Vokes, dr.:
ITO n drink (cocktail), $1,000"
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05

the great American hog is everywhere
to be seen squirting streams OF tobacco
Juice on the floor between his feet
Sometimes one is found who makes a
concession to the sign by splitting his
COB down between the window frame
and the sash, where 1t is impossible to
wash-if street cars ever are washed
and where it is left to accumulate, and
produce a sickening stencil.
Therefore, it is highly refreshing and
encouraging to know that the New
York health authorities have taken the
bull by the horns-or, rather, the great
American hog by the ears-and in
voked the law to compel him to act de-
Gently at least in public places.
Twenty-Five Of these human porkers
we're arrested Tuesday in Greater New
York for splitting on the floors OF street
cars and ferry boats. These, with one
exception, were fined or held for trial
in from 500 to $500 bail. The health
board has $50 special policemen out in
plain clothes who ride about in public
vehicles looking for the G. A. H. n
these arrests are said to be only the
beginning of a vigorous crusade II
support of the ~anti-spitting law.
This is well. Every self-respecting
community in the country may with
profit to decency and the public health
pass a similar law and enforce it. In
these days, when consumption is one
of the most prevalent of contagious
diseases, such a law would seem to be a
necessity.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05

children OF the city. and yesterday com-
pleted the work According to the re-
port made by him, there are 1,04S chill
dren Of school age. against 9S5 last
year, IN increase of IS over last year.
OF this number there are 4o5 girls be-
tween the ages of s and 16; and 119 be-
tween the ages of 16 and 81. OF the
boys between the ages of 6 and 16
we have s9S. and between the ages Of
16 and 81. los.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05

Dear Human Brute
You will, of course, be going out to-
night to torture some of the helpless
dogs. 1t will be easy to do, and doubt
less rare sport. The poor dog will be
friendly with you since you, perhaps,
look like a man, and will conclude
that since he has never hurt you, you,
of course, will o wish to hurt him.
Of course the dog will be entirely mis-
taken, poor friendly, helpless thingi
But you will merely add spice to the
fun. When the dog comes up to you,
trusting to the fact that you resemble
a man, you will note with joy that it is
the harmless valuable dog of your
neighbor next door, a dog that plays
with the children in the day and
watches the house at night. You well
know that you have a drug in your
pocket that will give this helpless an
imal all the pain possible to suffer,
just as much agony as though you tied
him down and slowly burned him to
dea'h with hot iroas. What fun these
reflections will give you, dear human
Brute! Then you will administer the
poison and watch the poor animal in
its terrible agony. The dog will whine
with the awful pain, the sweat will
pour out on him as though you had
dipped him in the river. then he will
go into commissions. All of this will
take some time, and you can enjoy ii
at your leisure, dear Brute; rubbing
your hands and smiling while the deg
dies.
By the way, Brute, a community has
a way of using tar and feathers and
idle telegraph poles, some times. Have
you thought about that feature of the
sport? X. X. X.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05
.ELKS INSTALL OFFICERS.
The Sistersvflle Have a Fine
Time at h Installation OF the
New OHicers-A Social Session
FoIIowed-Late News From Tyler
County's Metropolis.

County's Metropolis.
Special to the Register.
SISTERSVILLE, w. Va, April A.
Last evening, at their hall in the Hem
egham & Daley block. Charles street,
the members OF the Slstersyille Lodge,
NO. 1888, B. P. o. Elks. held their reg
ular annual installation services. h
meeting was conducted by Past Exalted
Ruler Perry A. Shanor, and he exer-
cises were certainly most impressive.
The new officers installed were. Exalt-
ed Ruler, James H~emegham; esteemed
leading knight, Harvey Lamberton;
esteemed loyal knight, w. James
Browne; esteemed lecturing knight,
Joseph e. Wagner; secretary, A. Il.
Doyle; treasurer, Joseph p. Sweeney;
trustee, d. Daley, and tiler, Charles
H. Baker. After the installation SER
vices and the business OF the lodge had
been concluded, the members of the
lodge adjourned to the club rooms,
where an excellent collation. had been
arranged by Dignal and Taylor, the res
tauranteurs. The social session was
one of the most pleasant and enjoyable
the lodge has ever held. Speeches were
made and toasts responded to by u
number of the members of the order,
both local and visiting. John b. Nor
ris and Eddie Fox, Of the Columbia
theatre, also assisted greatly in enter
aiming.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05

In New Orleans an Injunction to
prevent the further shipments of mules
by the British government to the
Transvaal has been asked for. In the
case of the Cubans before we declared
wal on Spain, an injunction was not
necessary, because the government did
it's duty as a neutral power. But in the
case of the English it's different. 1t
Anglomaniac administration to its
plain duty, and doubtless even that will
be ineffective.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05
MARTINS FERRY.
local News From the City of Mills
and Factories.
A Sad Death.

Word was received here last evening
that John Wilson, son of Rev. and
Mrs. ". ]. Wilson, pastor of the First
NJ. e. Church. had died at his home at
Cuyahoga Falls, after an illness of only
a few days. Mr.. acd Mrs. Wilson were
at the bedside of their son. The death
of their son is a most sad one, as only
two years ago they buried their other
son, and this was their only son living.
The congregation of his church and all
the people extend their sympathy to
the fbereaved parents, who while in this
city have endeared themselves to the
people. Mr.. Wilson leaves a wife and
several children. It could not be learn
ed last evening when the funeral would
take place.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05
ARREsTING THE sPITTERs.

Despite the numerous signs in every
street a in big black type requesting
passengers not to spit on the floor, the
average street car is an abomina-
ton. especially to women with their
finer senses and their easily soiled and
often delicate and expensive skirts. De-
spite these peremptory signs. however,
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05
MORGAN'S WORLD CONQUERING
SCHEMES.

Financial Dictator ]. Pierpont Nor
gan has sailed for Berlin to lay the
foundation of an iron and steel COM
bine that will be world wide. He will
meet the ironmasters of Germany for
the purpose of bringing about an inter-
national agreement as to price of GER
tain materials and distribution of pro-
ducts. The Germans are favorable to
such an agreement, and it i expected
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05
PARD0NED.
He is i'm the Last Stages of Cons
acknowledgements by the
ROurd.
ial TO the Register.

Special to the Register.
CHARLESTON. w. Va. April s.-Gov,
ernor White granted a pardon to-day 20
elias Hatfield. Jr., who killed Doc. Ellis,
at Gray. w. Va, while the latter was on
az Norfolk & Western train, Taking TO
the mountains, Hatfield deded arrest by
the officers. but agreed to surrender 10
the Governor of the State. Governor At
kinson accordingly went TO Mingo county
and Hatfield kept his word He was tried
in December. 1899. and sentenced to twelve
years in the penitentiary. He was par
doned on account of his health. being In
the last stages of consumption.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05

The kidnappers who threaten to burn
out the eyes of stolen children If they
are not ransomed, are pushing things
Just a trife too far. They are inviting
the death penalty everywhere for their
crimes, and this may be reinforced by
judicious touches of the latest wrinkles
in lynch law, which would seem to be
peculiarly applicable to this crime.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05

Syracuse, N. Y, special to the Chi
cago Inter Ocean: Harry Vokes, a
member of the Ward and Vokes COM
pany, which has been playing at SYRIA
cuse, made a contract with E. D. Stair,
the manager of the company, at the be-
ginning OF the season that If he indulg-
ed in any intoxicating liquors he would
forfeit the sum Of 8 1000.
Harry is a member Of the Elks, and
happened to drop in on the Syracuse
Mlks when thsy were having 4 AQcial
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05
Highland Golf CIuh.

The Highland Golf Club held a very
important meeting this week. In ad-
dition to re-electing the old officers
for the ensuing year, and increasing its
membership to forty, a resolution pre-
vailed to abolish all present rules gov
erning the club and authorizing the
committee on greens to formulate a
new set of rules to be adopted at the
next meeting of the club.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05
A Challenges.

To the Editor of the Register.
Sir:-As we have seen line after line
in our daily journals about the cham
pion Miller Stogie Makers bowling
team, and have heard the various
members of that team Growing like a
victorious cock in a pit, and knowing of
no better way of putting a stop to the
same, we hereby challenge them to a
series of best two in three games, on
Fette's alleys, some Saturday after
noon, for $25 a side, money to be post
ed with Mr.. Fette three days before
date of contest.
POLLOCK CIGAR FACTORY BOWL
ING TEAM,
VIM. SMITH, Captain.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05

How about the soldiers who risked
their lives equally with Funston in the
capture of Aguinaldo, Mr.. President?
Are not they to be rewarded also? The
reminder sent by Governor Rogers, of
Washington, to the President is timely.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05

The showing of d~elinquents on the
books of the water board, running over
a long period of years, reveals a start
ling condition of things under the man
agement of the late ring. 1t discloses
the rings astonishingly lax methods
of doing business, and 1t shows pos
sibly more or less of rank favoritism
and rotten politics.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05

Lii Hung Chang, who has fled from
Pekin to Shanghai, says he does so
because he is indisposed. Doubtless
Lii means that he is indisposed to run
the risk of losing his willy old head.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05

The occupation of the towns of China
by the white soldiers has caused an
epidemic of suicide among Chinese wo-
men. Another damning indictment
against the invading Christians.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05

The German Bernhard, the Countess
Rakoffski, is coming to America.
What an appropriate name. OF course,
the Rakoffski expects a goodly rake off
of American dollars.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05

killed or manned in a shooting tour
nament on Long Island. The law will
look on at this cruel slaughter called
sport, although it prohibits cock-fght-
ing.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05
REGISTER AGENCIES.

WHERE THE REGISTER CAN Be
PURCHASED OUT OF TOWN..
CHARLESTON, w. Va.-Hotel Runner
News Stand.
WASHINGTON, d. = Queen News
Stand. National Hotel.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05

NttkIy, per y6dI, III .-o confa
Stamps OF the denomination OF Two cIhnn
and less accepted for amounts less 'hAn
one dollar. .-.
Correspondence containing. important
news solicited from every part Oh the SUI
rounding country. 70
Rejected communications will not pc re.
turned unless accompanied by sunic'en'
postage. ~
Tributes Of Respect and Obituary nv
tices, five cents per line. .,
THE REGISTER, embracing It's seVerdt
editions, is entered at tae Postoface AZ
Wheeling, w. Va, as secoad-ciass naAei.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1901-04-05
- VIM. SMITH,, Captain.

Wheeling League - Wednesdays
games-AIl Alikes, 95S, 992, 951; q
8S1; Columbus, 1853, S55, 921; 1883.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-12-31
CHAPTER XVII.

There were unshed tears in my eyes
for l would not let Minima know my
fears-when 1 saw dimly, through the
mist, high cross standing in the midst
of a small grove of yews and expresses,
planted formally about it. The rain was
beating against it, and the wind sobbing
in the trees surrounding it. 1t seemed
so sad, so forsaken, that it drew us to it.
Without speaking the child and l crept
to the shelter at its foot, and sat down
to rest there, as if We were companions
to it in its loneliness.
1t was too dark now to see far along
the road, but as we waited and watched
there came into sight a rude sort of COW
cred carriage, like a market cart, drawn
by a horse with blue sheep-skin hang
ing round his neck. The pace at which
he was going was not above a jog-trot,
and he came almost to a standstill oppo-
site the cross, as if it was customary to
pause there. This was the instant to ap-
peal for aid. l darted forward and
stretched out my hands to the driver.
"Help u.s. 1 cried; 1--WE have lost our
way, and the night is come" I could see
now that the driver was burly, red
faced, clean-shaven Norman peasant. He
crossed himself hurriedly, and glanced
at the grove of dark, solemn trees from
which we had come. But by his side sat
a priest, in his cassock and broad-brim-
med hat fastened up at the sides, who
alighted almost before had finished
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-12-31
4 Warming to Preachers.

81 thought it would be easy enough to
convert the lay people of the town, but
realized, of course, that the ministers
would be a harder task. 1 remember
one of the first sermons preached with
that idea before me. 1t was hot sum-
mer day, and gentleman very much
under the influence of liquor slid into
the rear part of the church and went to
sleep. 1t was somewhat disquieting at
first, but soon warmed up to the sub
ject and forgot him. What happened
has always been a warning to me
against very loud preaching-I walked
him up. My vehemence so disturbed
him that he arose, walked unsteadily
I'D the aisle, and stopped in front of
the pulpit. l was dreadfully embar-
rassed, l remember, but 1 retained suf-
ficient presence of mind to take what
l thought was an efficient and brilliant
means of bridging over the gap, for, of
course, l had stopped preaching when
he stood still and looked at me. Lean
ing over the pulpit remarked suavely:
81 perceive that my good brother is
ill. Will some
Before any one could move, how
ever, he lifted his head, and, fixing his
blinking eyes upon me, remarked in
perfectly distinct tones heard through
out the church:
"I sh'd think such preachin' 'ud
make everybody illv v"-Cyrus Towns
end Brady, in New Lippincott.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-12-31
English as 1t Is Spelled.

He walked up to the hotel register,
signed his name with flourish, ''E. K.
Phtholognyrrh."
''Look here, Turner" exclaimed the
clerk, who knew him well, "are they
hunting for you or what? Where do
you get that outlandish name?"
"Get back, my boy, get back! You're
slow" replied Turner, airily, as he lit
a cigar. That's my same old name
written in plain English and pronounc-
ed as usual, just Turner Look at it.
OF course l do it just to get them all
guessing. They wonder what nation
am from; what my name is. 1 can
now hear people talk about me all
around. 1t is, as said before, English
spelling. 'Phth,' there is the sound of
It. in 'phthisis'; 'olo,' there is the 'ur' in
Colonel; 'gn,' there is the m in gnat';
'yrrh,' is the sound of 'er' in 'myrrh.
Now if that does not spell Turner
what does it spell?"