Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1901-11-29
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es-The BallotBox, the Contribution
Box, and the Hat-Box."-Ex.
Jnks-now much do you think
minister ought TO get for marrying
eouple2 Filkins-Well, If wholly unac-
quainted with them perhaps he might
be let Off with slx-inonths.
She-uow beautifully Miss Heavy
weight dancesl She doesn't seem to
touch the floor sometimes! He (whose
feet are stlll suffering from the last
polka With her)-She doesn't!-Punch.
Roderick-The advertisement said it
was great stopping place for the leis-
ure class. Van Albert-Was 1t SO? Rod
eriek-les; n dozen tramps stopped ut
the kitchen every morning.
News.
"Sir, | have come to ask you for your
daughters hand" "All right, my boy.
| think you'll find 1t in the uishwater."
Then the young man left, smiling,
knowing that II such was the case he
had won prlze.-Commoner.
| Floorwalker Good morning. You
wish to do some shopping, | presume?
Bride with hubby)-Y-e-s Floorwalller
Step into the smoking room and the
boy there will give you check for
your husband.-New York Weekly.
A Freezer for Mrs. Neville; Mrs.
Newlfe-1 acknowledge that | have my
faults, and am sometimes cross, Jack,
dear, but IL had the last two years of
my life to live over again should mar
ry you just the same. Mr.. Newfe-I
doubt lt.-Tit- Bits.
Mrs. Frils-Now that | have engaged
you, Bridget | am going to begin right
away to give you little training in the
art of waiting on guests. You see, my
daughter is coming out next month
Bridget-Indade, mum! An how long
was she snt up for?-Rlchmond Dis
patch.
"You pugilists don't seem to have
nearly so much to say as formerly"
NO." answered the eminent represent
tative of the prize ring; ito tell the
truth, we got so Interested in listening
to,these naval gentlemen that we kind.
of forgot our own affairs. ."-Washing-
ton Star.
Miss Breezy-Yes, I'm engaged to
George. 1t was pretty hard to decide.
because | liked Tom quite as well as
George, and they're equally wealthy.
Miss Wabash-What finally decided
you? Miss Breezy-George promised
me the most allmony in case of di-
philadelphia Press.
Imet Hargus in the street yesterday
morning and he ficked his cigar ashes
in my face. Pm writing to him now to
tell him what l think about it," "Why
didn't you tell him what you thought
about 1t thenW Because | never can
express myself with any satisfaction
eously."-Chicago Tribune.
Grievous Offense: Magistratea-Th
} charge is interfering with an officer.
Roundsman McCarty, you viii please
: state exactly what the defendant did,
, Roundsman McCarty-Oi wor passing
, his fruit shtand, yer amer, an Oi
, shwoiped a banana, when tn dago
) trold t TEX it from me, yer anner.-Les-
: lies Weekly.
Sunday School Teacher-Faith, chill
dren, is believing in the existence of
something we cans see. For example,
. when you buy bananas, you know that
there is a delicious fruit inside the
| tough skin Do you understand? Chill
: dren-Yes, ma'am. Sunday School
, Teacher-Well, what is faith? Chill
e dren-Bananas.
Ready for the Rush: They had been
drifting about in the open boat seven
days, and all were near unto death,
when the half-famished sailor in the
bow leaped up and cried: "a sail! A
sailw "What, bargain sale?" shrek
ed the half-dead woman passenger, as
, she begun fumblng for her purse
Baltimore World
His One Literary Success: Miss Kul-
cher-Did you ever go in for literature,
Mr. Gay? Mr.. Gay-Well-er-not eX-
actly. but once when | was at college
wrote short story and got one hun
, dred dollars for it. Miss kulcher-
, Really? What was it? Mr.. Gay-Dear
: Father, I'm broke. Please send me
hundred. Philadelphia Press.
The professional liar braced himself
when he felt the thrill of n bite along
his fishing pole. When the cork went
under he gave deft jerk and landed Il
minnow about five inches long.
! "Shucks" he muttered with chagrin,
+ as he took it off the hook; 81 wish that
'un had got away; 1t would have been
so much bigger."-Ohio State Journal.
f Pat-I say, Mike, have three-pen-
, ny piece with hole in 1t which can
not get rid of at all-at all. What shall
| do with it, begorra? Mike-Sure, Pat,
5 you must do the same as did onest-
: an excellent plan was mine. md
ohwat was it, at ALL Mike| "Oh, it
, was fine, Pat, | tell you. That three
penny piece had bothered me long
d tonne, entoirely. Nobody would have
= 1t, so at last | melted down a. sixpence
z l11n At,t