The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1901-12-10
Zone side
. Remarks


The move to raise the pay of the fed
era1 legislators to $4,000 may be all right
when the legislator is that sort of man,
but the premium is altogether too high
for the 30-cent politician.
A Russian surgeon says that violet
rays soothe and heal wounds This is
very nice, but what the American man
wants is something that will seothe his
wife when she finds her unposted letters
in his pockets.
What miserable scoundrel is it who has
suggested perpetrating such an outrage
en- the honest farmer as to repeal that
law which enables him to collect $40 when
the health board kills a $3.50 COW, whose
principal ailment is old age?
Lillian Russell celebrated her undated
birthday yesterday. Miss Russell will
also doubtless soon celebrate her tin we'd
ding. She is, indeed, half way there, hav-
ing been married five times, or is it six?
Another suspicious day! The pope.
Count Tolstoy, Jonkherr Van Tets, Miss
Stone and Nine. Tsilka all dead yesterday
are alive again and most of them passed
a comfortable night.
The women of Chicago are both cour-
ageous and resourceful. One of them Sc
verely dubbed a ''masher" who insulted
| her, then knocked off his hat and retained
| it for a souvenir. A row of hats dang
| ling from the Chicago woman's waist
hereafter may be considered as equaling
| the Indians string of scalpS.
Mrs. Wright Smith, of Connecticut
who refused to tell the court where she
| had deposited $390,0 instead of being
! lau6ed as the unique specimen of her sex
who could keep a secret, is imprisoned
| for contempt. What an inconsistent world
/ it isl
| The mayor of Houghton, Mich, is d
disguised man. stranger left his
valise on the wharf for a few hours 10
| look for work. When he returned the
! mayor hired him to drag the river for
/ the body of a drowned man. After work
ing some time curiosity prompted the
stranger to ask the victims name. The
| ensuing explanation brought out that the
! owner of the valise was supposed to have
| fallen in, and that the stranger was
dragging for his own remains He re-
ceived his pay, but the mayor says that
! in future all drowned persons will have
| to swear to the fact before he will hire
| them to recover their own bodies.
The industrial commission at Washing
/ ton has discovered that the whole trouble
of the servant girl problem is due to the
irresponsible tyranny of the mistresses,,
and not word is said of the autocratic
! despotism of the cook lady, and her alder
! and abettor, the second girl
Gov. Van SAINT announced that he was
too hoarse to speak at the NJ E. church
-en Sunday evening. It is respectfully
/ suggested that if the governor would
stop hurraning for himself for little
while he might not tire his voice so
much.
Now is good time to tell your wife
/ that you have sworn off smoking. It
may save you serious trouble and many
cigars of uncomfortable character and
-smokable brand.
That whisper, about the ten nobls
i youths being in love with Queen Wilhel-
/ nina that the correspondents are telling
US so much about seems to be getting
rather beyond the whisper stage now
! that it has been in about every newspaper
in the civilized world.