Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1901-02-22
GONE, ALL GOMEZ
His Surprise mt the Disappear
ance of Old Acquainta nccs.

~ have returned to Washington
after an absence of Is years, and
while the general aspect of the city
appears to my eye about the same,
have lingering suspicion that some
thing is missing" said former resi-
dent of this city, says the Washing
ton Star.
"Why is it ?" asked member of the
Ananias club, which holds nightly
meetings there.
This morning my slumbers were
not broken by the high falsetto, rich
baritone or resonant voice of the col
ored collector of ashes, whose peue-
trating wall of 'Aschohees ould
asch-chees-chees!' used to enter my
room with the first rays of the glo-
rious sun. And this morning / missed
from the streets those curiously
and wonderfully held-together-with-
pieces-of-wire-and-ro things called
by courtesy wagons, and drawn by
moving objects which even courtesy
couldn't call horses. Where are
they?"
"Gone to the dump heap and the
bone yard. We have fine system of
ash and garbage collection now"
"And that delightful odor of dish
water and surface drainage which is
the joy and pride of every Philadei-
phian and Baltimorean, as it trickles
through the streets-I can't recall
whether | detected here"
"You never did"
But the bells, the glorious, sweet
sounding bells of the ragman; bells
with noise defying the deep peal OF
the monastery bells to the shrill,
crisp tinkle of those of the sleigh. 1
lived in New York for some years,
and seem to miss them"
"You do, you certainly do" replied
the disciple Of the prize liar, truth
fully.
"And the ragman on the sidewalk
with his bag under his arm and his
fog horn voice issuing ribbon-like
from his cavernous mouth. Has Ne,
too, been suppressed?"
"IIe has"
"The ole clo' man ard the glass
| putin man. where, oh, where, are
these two heavenly shatterers of the
pure atmospheric"
"Gone."
"But not the hucksters, with their
fine, metallic, razor-edged voices, who
were the first chroniclers of poetic
springtime as they wendell their ser
pentine, sinuous way through the
meanderings of the city, holding in
their robust arms the green products
of natures generous soil for the mas
tication and nutrition of the city
folks. Where are they?"
"They are mutes now; had their
mouths sewed up by ordinance"
"And the diminutive boy with huge
bundles of Sunday morning papers
and still more mammoth tones, who
used to stand on the corner or chase
madly through the streets breaking
the peaceful Sabbath day by his clar-
ion calls to get out of bed and buy his
'pape, pape! NooyourkpapeH Tell
me instantly, where is hep"
Hes still here, but he sings his
rhythmical song in his mind"
"And the roped streets that papa
and mamma dear insisted upon when
ever baby pet was cutting a tooth?"
"Are roped nit"
"These electric-lighted, swiftly,
moving surface cars which rival the
latest railway coach-what a revela-
ton! Had horse cars when l left
New York is the only big city
know of where the horse cars are left.
They left Washington long ago"
81 scarcely know Pennsylvania av.
enue above Fourteenth street, with
the fine big buildings of the Star,
the Post, Southern railway and the
new Willard. The owners of property
in that vicinity seem on improvement
bent"
"They are" answered the president
of the club, as he detailed the little
man next to the returned prodigal
son to tell the next story Of the even
ing-"and so is the city in general.
We have done away with street
noises, and many of the nuisances
which other cities tolerate, and we
have only just begun. The next
great step toward the desideratum OF
perfect city is the suppression OF
the smoke nuisance. We are now
about to have our innings with the
violators of this ordinance, and we
hope for a solar plexus knockout in
the shape Of convictions and punish
ments. This is residential city, and
It is our purpose to make it all that
name really implies. Are we sue
ceeding?"
"Fine!" answered the prodigal,
warmly. and he turned his attention
to the little man, who had already be.
gun his Munchausen tale.