Evening star., 1901-07-20
WHEN FRIENDSHIP CEASED

to go to housekeeping in houses alongside
Of each other
Their namss werknt Mr. and Mrs. Jack
son and Mr. and Mrs. Johnson. but these
names will DO for the purpose Of this
strictly veracious narrative.
They had met irr1e boarding house. The
two women were quick to find a common
ground In Knocking the boarding house and
the landladythereof. Ditto the two men.
SO the housekeeping stunt. alongside
each other, Vas arranged.
They were all very enthusiastic about It.
The women. who, started in to call each
other by thetE first names almost from the
beginning. gaade up lists of the things
tneyd need The men made calculations
as to how they were going to pay the ini-
tfal installments on the furniture.
And so the two young married couples,
the Jacksons and the Jehnsons. moved into
tneir cute little 22.3o-per-month houses
side by side.
1t was great for a couple OF weeks.
Mrs. jackson and Mrs. Johnson leaned
over the back fence and told each other
or the funny. breaks they had made In
tEeir cooking attempts. Each inspected the
ciared 1t to be just too lovely for any
thing ON this earth or any other earth.
Ihey called each other 'Florrfe' and Ger
tie from their respective windows when
thing They borrowed four bits from each
other to pay the iceman and the bread
man and the milk man when these insistent
persons came around between pay days
tnelf husbands pay days. After dinner
they'd help each other washing and wiping
the dishes-they'd appear in the back yard
or one or the other. in their nice fresh
mouse Jackets with their arms around each
others waists, and talk about how queer
it seemed that they appeared to have
Known each other always
Oh, yes; they were so thick!
jackson and johnson. likewise. got along
bully together. They weren't quite as hasty
to pick up each others frst names as the
women. but It wasn't long after the be-
ginning Of the housekeeping scheme before
they were addressing each other as Bill
and Jim.
Jackson strung I'D his old guitar and
Johnson got new head for his banjo, and
they plunkety piunked together for hours
IN each others abodes every evening. II
they happened to meet down town they'd
shoot one or two In together. and come
home real jolly, Their wives said they
never saw two men pull together so beau
tffuliy Jackson told Johnson OF a scheme
office. and johnson told Jackson of what
pfnhead the chief Of his division was. The
four took turns in entertaining each other
to beer and Welsh rabbits, and they de-
to be just ideal.
.Uh-huh, 1t was an perfectly grand for
about fortnight. sure enough.
Then, one evening. when Jackson and
Johnson got home, they found their wives
a bit constrained. Johnson's wife explained
It by saying that she certainly thought
Florrie jackson ought to leave her enough
milk to do her cooking with. and that she
didn't see why the Jacksons weren't able to
Duy their own coffee, instead of borrowing
1t all the time. Jackson's wife explained 1t
by saying that she was more than half
afraid that she had been deceived in Gertfe
Johnson. If To in
an injustice. she went on. but she was
really afraid that Gertie johnson was stingy
and had deceitful nature. Hadn't she,
FIorrie Jackson loaned Gertie Johnson 4S
cents only last week to pay for her hus-
bands laundry when 1t was delivered at
the door? Why then. should Gertie John
son act snoopy and put out when she had
asked her for just little mite Of milk and
coffee. her own milk and coffee having not
yet arrived? $40 ~.
"Fergit it."said johnson to his wife.
Fergit 1t. said jackson to his wife.
Jackson and Johnson plink-plunked as
usual on their banjo and guitar that even
Ing, but SOMEHOW they weren't quite as
free with each othef as they had been, and
the women didn't come together at all that
evening, both Of them having announced
that they hadasome, fourteen letters apiece
to write.
And thus 1t went IN.
unconsciousay. johnson found himself
thinking that the BJacksons didn't really
amount to a whole lot. and he told his wife
that in his opinion she'd be a Jay IL she
permitted Mrs. Jackson to come It over
her In any manner whatsoever
Likewise, Jackson began to reach the
conclusion that he'd been more or less
taken In with those Johnson folks, and he
ADVISED his wife to give back knock for
ahUch a'a ,. II MRS Johnson continued to exhibit
a dlsposit1on TO engage in that game,
One evening, when Johnson got home
ne found Mrs. Johnson real angry Mrs.
Johnson said that one OF the neighbors had
toid her that Mrs: Jackson was going
most of her time gadding around, and that
she only got home every afternoon a few
minutes before AUST in time to turn a
handspring and throw together q little
food for Mr.. Johnson's dinner
On the same evening, upon Jackson's ar
rival nome. he found his wife dissolved in
tears Pressed for an explanation. Mrs
Jackson told Jackson that she had never
been so abused In her life as she had been
that day by that Johnson woman, who
had accused her-"Me! Just think OF a
creature like that accusing mev'-of talk
ing about her to the neighbors, whereas
the only thing that she had said to a sIns
gle. solitary neighbor was that Mrs. John-
son neglected her husband outra 9eouaIy
and 1t was true-boo-hoo-and she Wouid
stick to the truth of her statement right
down to her last gasp. so she would!
Johnson was sore and announced that
ne q never had any use for those Jackson
trash. and that for two cents he'd KNOCK
Jackson's block off.
Jackson was red-hot over tha ..abusa,.
that had been heaped upon his wife bv
Mrs. Johnson. and he rolled up his sleeves
and giared around ferociousiy, and said
that he had a great mind to prance right
over to the Johusons' and bite Johnson;s
arm off close to the shoulder
On the next day the Jacksons moved
And Mrs. Jackson and Mrs. Johnson
knew each others business from the dawa
when their dresses reached only to ths,r
shoe-tops .~ e'A
And Jackson and johnson were na1t n
each others little Office intrigues.
And both outfits had the Same. or y,r-
tually the same, list OF friends.
And the knocking Of the jackson. ard
the knocking Of the Johnsons throurhnnt
Washington is now something horrtfie.
The next time you stack me IN ara,rst
bunch OF tads like those two. provrI.
know it!' 'oa II
@It was you that dragged me into eo,n.
to housekeeping alongside those. chaa1 .
skatest mutters Jackson to his wife
NOT HIS FAULT.
This Man Could Not Help but n. !.
s.tr-- Train RObber
How became q train ro,A.. -.