The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1901-03-03

Once there was a man who wore a Six
and three-quarters Hat and had been so
busy staving off the People who needed it
right away because they had some Bills to
meet that he never found time 10 sit down
and absorb Culture. Yet he had to go out
and meet those who wore Specs and had
these high Mansard Foreheads. Sometimes
he found himself in the Front Room where
every one was expected to discuss Iitera-
ture, Art, Music and the Difficulty of get
ting good Kitchen Help.
This Man was a Pin-Head in a good many
Respects, but he was as Wise as a Serpent.
A man does not have to be stocked up with
Information in order to be Wise. This Man
was what Edmund Clarence Stedman would
call a Piker. A Piker is one who gets into
the Game on Small Capital and Lets On to
be holding back a huge Reserve. A Piker
is usually Safe when he sagatiates among
the Well-Bred. because they are too Polite
TO call n Bluff.
A Piker always has his entire Stock of
Goods in the Show Window.
When it came TO Music the Piker did
not know the difference between a Fugue
and a Cantata. Such knowledge of Litera-
ture as he could boast was picked up by
reading the Posters in front of Book Stores.
The average Katydid had about as much
Art Education as he could have Spread
if it had come to a Showdown, but he
never allowed it to come. He had about as
much Business in an Assemblage of Guilt
waited Chautauquans as a man with a
ragged Two-Dollar Bill would have in Wall
Street. Yet he managed to cut Figure
Fights over the Thin Ice and he had the
name of being one OF the Brainiest Gentle
men that ever accepted an Invitation to the
Evening Session of the Olympian Circle of
Hens.
The Piker knew the Value of the Stock
Phrase. And the way he could raise a Dust
and dodge out of a Tight Place was a little
Bit of All Right.
One evening the Piker went to call on
Mrs. Hester Kazam, author of many I'M
published Poems and the boss Diana of the
Tuft Hunters. At the Kazam Home. which
is rugged up with Red Blankets and Green
Lamps so as to be Oriental. he bumped into
Henrietta Hunter Haw, who will be remem-
Dered as the Young Lady who poured at
the Afternoon Reception to f. Hopkinson
Smith.
Miss Haw reclined at half length in the
Turkish Corner and asked the Piker what
he thought of Sienkiewicz. The Piker knew
that he had heard that name sprung some
where before, but if he had tried to Pro-
nounce it he would have gone 10 the Floor
He didn't know whether Sienkiewicz was
the author of Lovers Once but Strangers
Now or 1.-THE Gentleman from Arkansaw."
However, he was not 10 be Feazed. He
knew the kind of Conversational Parsley
that is needed to Garnish a full-blown In
tellectual Vacuum, and he passed some of
it to Henrietta.
He said he liked Sienk so far as the Psy-
Geological Analysis was concerned, but it
sometimes occurred TO him that there was a
lack of Insight and Broad, Artistic Grasp.
This is the Style of Vapor calculated to
keep a Young Woman anchored right in the
Turkish Corner and make her believe she
has met the Really and Truly Gazip.
The Piker unreeled a little more of the
same kind. He said that the Elaboration of
Incident showed a certain Modicum OF
Skill, but there was not enough Plus-Hu-