Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1901-09-12
THE BASEBALL UMPIRE.

He is Pictured by One Writer as the
Human Up-against-It.
Who hath woe, who hath meanings,
who hath lamentations and suiferings
in the flesh?
Verify, 1t lie he who looketh uron the
baseball when it ourveth itself Alright,
When it slideth through the centre
OF the afternoon and fooleth the base.
man, that he dodgeth therefrom;
When it cometh over the middle Of
the plate, and the umpire oalleth 1t a
strike. -
Yea, verify, my son. it is he that is
the umpire that getteth the hot end
OF fate, and hath no joy in his exist
enoe.
Behold, he standsth behind the
catcher and squinteth across the dia
mond and sayeth in loud voice, "One
strikeu"
And the home team arise as one man
and come from all parts of the field
and declare unto him that he is a liar
That he is the father Of lies; :,
That the truth cannot be found in
him with a million candle power
searchlight and writ of replevin.
And they that sit upon the bleachers
stand upon their feet and call in a
loud voice;
"oh, thou robber! Thou footpad
Back to the huckster wagon 20
Yet the umpire sticketh to it, and
hneth the players and sendeth them Co
tine bench, and the game resumeth
itself.
Now, peradyenture, he asserteth that
the next one is Ba-l-l-l!"
And the pitcher riseth upon his hind
legs and hUweleth like unto man ia
agony, saying:
Surely put il square in the centre
Oh the plate. or truth thou art fitted
with pair of bum lamps.
What thou knoweth not about balls
and strikes would take all Of Carnegie's
money to build library to contain the
books telling of it.
Furthermore, 1t is my opinion that
thou art a horsethief and a pick-
pocket
And the catcher swearetb strange
oaths and growleth at the umpire and
telieth him that be could not see boy
car rolling across junction.
And the first haseman yelleth unto
MN tnae MS picture is yet in the
rogues' gallery.
$500 VIC nocuuu uhbeIna0 ana the
shortstop and the centreheldei add re.
marks that would cause telephone
bog to burn at once
voices
Behold thou art all right Oh.
righteous umpire oh, just umpire
Ihine eyes are as the eyes OF the eagle, .
and tnou art daisy from the fields for
immaculate honesty and purity of pur-
that he may take his base %
And the umpire sticketh to Il. and
the game goeth on.
Now, there cometh time in the
inning that IL the ninth when there
are two men out and three men upon
the bases round about the field.
And the score is tied.
Then the umpire danoeth about FINN
one base to the other, and wisheth tbat
ne had fifteen eyes and revolver
And the next mau atriketh out. Yea.
he ianneth the atmosphere with wide
and sudden sweeps OF his bat
But the players rush at the umpire
and rend his gai ments.
AND tho tribe OF Bleacherites come
upon the field and chase him even
beyond the CITY limits.
surely, the umpire leadeth strenu-
GUS existence, and getteth more wounds
imam any. OF the ten Thousand men that |
ied the charge up the hill of San Juan.
ana ne needeth not lantern that he |
may look for the worst of it.
For It is handed unto him at every
game. wy
Verify, the umpire is the human I'M.
against-it, and he hath no mora low -
life than olawless cat at dog show.
Death of John Point.
New CASTLE. SAINT h.-Inhn Paint |