New-York tribune., 1901-09-25
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

..rba residents Of West Forks" SAYS The Ken
nebec (Me) Journal" were startled last week by
the sudden appearance of crew or woodrneh
which came out from the Spencer tract Ihey
had heard OF the assassination Of President Nc
Kinley through a Canadiap, who reached the camp
q, nigh, and who told them the country was going
IN war as soon as a sufficient number of men could
be raised. The next morning an early preahiast
was eaten and the crew started for the settlement
with all possible speed to offer their services When
they learned that there was no possibility or war
they quleted down and returned to camp
Mrs Bargen- Hunt-I think that druggist Is just
too for anything
Mainchantz-Why?
Mrs Bargen- Hunt--He advertised that ne would
sell thirteen stamps for cents ITS s spent d ny he
carfare to take ADVANTAGE OF ms oise, a Press 5
me twelve twos and one.-(Philadelpha ffess-
The cItv OF Grinnen. Iowa has just adopted a
drastic liquor law. II Is under the ordinance. a
crime for two or more citize to get together and
take a drink OF beer liquor. no matter Wnere
they meet, If II is In their own homes ana
they are members OF the same family. Under TINS
ordinance IL is a crime TO set glass of beer on the
table at the dinner hour. provided the family con-
sists of more than one person. The exact word
ing of the ordinance is:
THAT II shall be unlawful for two or more per
sons to congregate within the limits of the city or
Crinnell on any street vacant or unoccuped
property on about the college campus or build
ings in or about any lumber yard. in any car, or
on or about any railroad grounds or stock yards,
in or about any barn, stable or corncrio. store
house elevator or depot or in any other place. for
the purpose Of drinking beer any kind OF intox-
icatine LIQUOR or fer the purpose of creating dis
turbance or doing committing any disorderly
act"
Hoist by His Own Petara. ..Rier TO Stark with
a perambula tor)-Helo! That your napyn ,ou-
Stark trying TO be sinarp-No' i'S ohe po'
rowed of a neighbor. .. ..o,. l,,
SO? It's a homely little brute isn't it?"-(Bos-
ton Transcript
president Harper of the University OF Chicago, :,
saws THE Chicago Tribune "is receiving many
letters from prospective students who seem to
imagine that ne is the whole clerical force OF the
Midway School, but 1t remained for young woman
of Pecatonica, ILL.,. to seize on Nim as her escort
from, the depot when she reaches the city. The
Girl is ingenious to the admission that she IS
good looking Here is her letter. minus the sig
nature:
Dear Dr. Harper: I know you Will be pleased
70 learn that 7 have decided to attend the uni
versitv school of education this fall / am going
to Chicago next Saturday on the morning train,
and as I have never been In the city before l
would be glad If you would meet me at the depot
..I am feet inches tall. have light hair and
eyes and pleasing appearance. shall wear a
dark brown travelling skirt and blue waist. with
white woke I think | shall know you from your
p,ctures but for fear make mistake will you
please your card in your hat!'
ut was sail at the university that some one
| not President Harper-woud be sent to the trnin "
Bunker-An his aoouaintances are e,uaoS down on him
| for poughing up the ground on SUNDAY.
'.Why I didn't know he was farmer.
Bunker-Yes. he's the worst klnd or Iarmer az
| golf He's Just beginning, you know-tPhiiadei-
| phia Press.
| The Oldest veteran march in the parade at the
| last Grand Army reunion was John "a Reeo' oi
| Decatur, Ind He is 1oa years old.
well, I'll acknowedge I'm disaPpointsd san,s said in
| Rivers so,Iry II asked at least nifty people 10
! day what / ought to take for my cold ana noe one
Of them nended quinins m end a Rsook.
what did they recommend! asked oHoo~s'
"Quinine. ."-lChcago Tribune