davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-07-25

again, with an air of standing by her guns, let the worst come. If Miss Selma always felt an impulse to run, whenever she encountered her neigh bor, Mir. Wirewood, she considered that she had just cause for so doing, for Mr. Wirewood obstinately and relentlessly persisted in besetting her to marry him, and in utterly refusing to understand what No meant.
 The poor man was quite hard of hearing, and while this was one great barrier to a union of hearts and front yards, 1t was also an obstacle in the way of impressing the fact upon his understanding Miss Selina had con- sidered the matter very thoroughly.
 ''He ain't bad man." she conceded, honestly, "as men go; he goes to church, and he isn't stingy, and he wouldn't kick the cat. He don't drink and ain't afraid of burglars. If was going to marry any man, I would rather it would be him-only I'd have to spend my days shouting and screaming to make him hear. I haven't got the voice, if 1 had the patience. If I wanted him to get sugar, he'd think I said taclzs, as likely as any way, and I'd split my throat and get soured. If his deaf ness was uniform, I might get used to it, but sometimes he seems to hear tolerably well, and others you couldn't make him understand any thing if you shrieked your collar but ton out.''
 Mir Wireweed, on this merry June morning, looked so brisk, blithe and cheery, and so pleased at seeing her, that Miss Selina's heart smote her somewhat for her obduracy. She might as we'll at least be civil, she admitted inwardly, and nodded him 8 pleasant "Good-morning."
 Must have been quite a storm" !" she called out in clear, high voice.
 "'Tis getting a little warm," re- piled Mr. Wireweed. placidly.
 Storm said, " yelled Miss Snow bell, .tt rained in the night"
 "Oh." said Mir. Wireweed, sympa- fhizingly. ives, the storm-did it give you fright? Now, that's too bad. But ladies have no business trying Do get along by themselves without "a masculine brute to take charge of fem Now. you'd better-
 .'Iu have to run in." shrielxed Miss <<lina land get my breakfast oyer.v
 zzF WireWeed smiled approvingly.
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-07-25
SIGNALING MARS IMPOSSIBLE
It Is Entirely Beyond the Power of Human Resources to Ac-
 cOmplish.

The very largest city that this earth has ever known wouE be altogether too small to be visible to a being dwelling on the planet Mars, even if that being were endeavoring to see it with telescope as powerful as the greatest and most perfect instrument in any observatory on this globe, says Sir Robert s. Ball, in the Independent.
 If the whole extent of Lake Su- perior was covered with petroleum. and if that petroleum was set on fire, then I think we may admit that an inhabitant of Mars who was furnished with telescope as good as that which MT. Percival Lowell uses at FalkstaH might be able to see that something had happened. But we must not sup pose that the mighty confiagration would appear to the Martian as very conspicuous object. :. It would rather be very small feature, but still l think it would not be beyond the reach of praeticed observer in that planet. On the other hand, if an area the size of Lake Superior on Mars was to be flooded with petroleum and that petroleum was to be kindled, we would expect to witness the event from here not as great and striking confagra- tion, but as a tiny little point of just discernible light. The disk of Mars is not large object, and the confagra- tion would not extend over the three hundredth part of that disk.
 It is sufficient to state these facts to show that the possibility of sig naling to Mars is entirely beyond the power of human resources.
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-07-25
USES OF LIQUID AIR.
There Is But Little Hope That 1t Will Ever Prove to Be More Than .
 Curiosity.

As there is reason to believe that a a syndicate has been formed for the purpose of floating a limited com pany ostensibly for the commercial utilization of liquid air, one or two observations on this interesting sub stance may be timely, says the Lon- don Express.
 In the judgment of the most prom inent authorities on tAe subject, the commercial use of liquid air is not an economic possibility. It is true that large number of suggestions have been made pointing to it's adapta- bility for different purposes. It has been proposed as an explosive, and liquid air cartridges have actually been used (with indifferent results) for blasting. Mr. Tesla has been cred- ited with it's employment for increas- ing electrical conductivity, and there by transporting electric energy for thousands of miles without loss. Liquid air, too, has been suggested as motive power, preservative, a caustic for medical purposes and for a variety of other singular employ ments.
 It has to be borne in mind, how ever, that liquid air for power pur- poses costs 200 times as much as steam, requiring 200 degrees (Fahr- enheit) of frost for it's production, and that in any case it is expensive to make and most difficult of preser- vation. No doubt it excited great hopes on it's entry into the world as manufactured product, but the bet ter informed now regard it as. des- tined to relapse into the position of mere scientific curiosity.
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-07-25
NY DEAR oLD-FAsHIoNED WIFE.

 She never rustIed down the street In silks and draperies fine. She gave no champagne suppers
 With claret. cakes and wine, A dear home-lovtng creature,
 golden spot in Mfe, Who made life worth the living.
 My dear. oId-fashioned wife Bhe wasn't up in classics.
 In pOmp. In pride or style, But she always had a welcome.
 With her sweet, old-fashioned smile, And those sweet songs she used to sing I'd give One-haIf my life 10 hear the silvery voice of
 My dear. oId-fashioned wife. In circles high and lofty,
 She'd been quite out of place, But in her own home circle
 She refgned with QueenIy grace. She made of home an Eden
 Devoid of hate and strife, And sowed the seeds of love to bloom, My dear. old-fashioned wife. Perhaps when down the stream I've sped, Till reach that sunset shore. And cross the great divide Of life,
 Where time shall be no more, Then wandering long the river banks Where reigns eternal life, I'll meet. if I have faithful been,
 My dear. old-fashIoned wife r-F- Jay Gould, in Minneapolis House
 keeper.
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-07-25

50 handsome silk umbrellas, with sterling silver handles, inlaid with pearl, steel rod, paragon frames, cover and tassel complete, $1.50, from s. A case fine yard wide brown cotton, short pieces, 6c, from Sc.
 Ladies' iecru jersey vests, shell trimmed and taped, for 25c, from 10c.
 Ladies' extra size jersey shaped vests, taped, He, from 19c. | Ladies' white jersey shaped vests, high and low neck, also drawers, 19c, from 25c.
 200 dozen ladies' fancy seamless hose, also black and tan, also black with white feet, 9c pair, from 15c.
 100 dozen children's black ribbed seamless hose, 9c pair, from 121ac, 3 pairs for 25c. 200 dozen mems fancy. also black and tan, seamless half hose, 9c pair, from 15c.
 100 dozen mems fancy, also black and tan half hose, 41ac pair, from 9c.
 100 dozen good linen dinner nap- kins, 4Sc a dozen. from 75c.
 50 dozen mems negligee madras and percale shirts, attached and detached | cOlldfS anu S0pdTdle CuAS, ooS, AAOin | 50c.
 500 pieces and 5 inch pure all silk ribons, 7c a yard, from 25c. 50 dozen ladies' imported fine lisle and drop stitch hose, 25c, from soc.
 50 handsome seersucker entire suits for ladies, tastefully trimmed, $3.9S. from $5.
 1000 yards best apron gingham, 5c yard, from Sc.
 2,O0O yards fine colored dimities, ,6Ac, from 1219c and 19c. And thousands of other bargains, as those who crowd our store from morn- ing to night can testify. Come early in the day if you want to get the best service. Wednesday and Saturday night means to be in the push. but they are all good natured, as they get what they cannot get anywhere else
 Remember, whatever others offer, our motto until we go out of business is. Reliable Dry Goods at Less Prices than Any Other House in Waterbury.
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-07-25

100 dozen ladies' fine drop stitch lisle hose, all colors and black, 25c, from soc 100 dozen Turkish wash face cloths, for 5c, from 5c each. 1S0 dozen handsome fringed nap kins, 4c each, from 7c. |. 1000 yards fine India linen, 7c yard, from 15c Three cases ladies' fine maco yarn vests, silk trimmed, lie, from 25c.
 50 dozen ladies' fine lawn aprons. 23c, from 39c; 25c from soc. 9 dozen ladies' fine merceriZed ruff fled petticoats, best makes, 9Sc, from $1 50. 50 dozen ladies' fine sateen shirt | waists, soc, from $1. 25 pieces lace allovers, 25c, from soc. 100 pieces yalenciennes butter lace, 25c pieces, from 50c.
 200 pieces of fine lace insertion, 10c and 15c, from 25c.
 30 pieces of white figured cambric, plaids and checks and stripes, 64c, from 10c.
 50 dozen mems fine elastic braces, 19c and 23c, from soc.
 275 yards silkoline remnants, Sc yard, from 15c.
 Ten gross ladies' fine garter elas- tics, 15c, from 25c.
 A case heavy huck towels, 4c each, from Sc.
 A case fine yard wide percales, all new patterns, 9c yard, from 121ac.
 50 dozen handsome new pillow shams and bureau scarfs, 25c, from soc.
 50 pieces fine lace allovers, 25c, from soc; 29c, from 5Sc; 35c, from roc; 45c, from ST. .-4,s.a
 Acase fine white cambric muslin, Sc, from 15c.
 A case yard wide cheviots. splendid for mems shirts, boys waists, etc, Sc, from 15c.
 A case fine wide printed lanws, love- 1y patterns, Sc, from 15c.
 200 dozen mems fine imported fan cy cotton hose, usual price soc to 15c. at 23c pair or $1.25 by the box of one-half dozen.
 75 dozen of ladies' petticoats, linen, duck, mercerized sateen, moreen, etc. perfect fitting, prices less than cost of manufacture.
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-07-25

mats right; Inlnk 1t OVer-InlnK it over," he said. cheerfully; I'm sure you'll come to the right conclu- sion by and by"
 "Oh," groaned Miss Selina, as she ran into the house, s'that man! If I stood there bawling until all the neighbors heard I couldn't make him understand. It's a great pity such really nice man should be so obsti- nate-and so deaf"
 Miss Snowbell felt vaguely upset and uncomfortable during breakfast, and when her aunt, who always washed up the dishes, began to clat- ter the breakfast things, she took down her sunbonnet and went and hunted up her garden hoe.
 five got fidgetty streak" she de- clared, starting briskly out to her lit tie vegetable garden. ''I'll go and hoe it off"
 It was queer, but she soon discov- cred that MT. Wireweed was hoeing in his vegetable garden.
 "You're at it early, Miss Selina," :" he hailed, joyously.,
 "Yes," she answered, briefly.
 'Did you think it over?" he asked, coming close to the dividing garden fence, where she was hoeing ! beet.
 ''No,' she yelled, "you shouldn't keep up that subject, Mir. Wireweed."
 Couldn't what?" he asked, with his hand to his ear.
 "You must drop the natter" she shrieked, ''I came out here to hoe" MT. Wireweed smiled delightedly.
 "Of course you didn't say No, but you didn't say Yes, either, and"
 five said No 50 times,' screamed Miss Selina, who was as red as a poppy. 'I don't like to be rude, but I can't help it."
 'sWell, that's encouraging. I knew you liked me a little, and I'm glad you can't help it; but I want you to like me a great deal Here's board loose; I'm going to take it clear off and come through, and we can sit on that bench and talk it over com fortab bly,"
 My stars," murmured Miss Selina, despairingly. "I believe in my heart I'll have to marry this man to get rid of him.
 "Of course you will," said MT. Wirewood, jollily, land you'll never be sorry for it, I tell you"
 Miss Snowbel gave a startled spring.
 Seems to me your hearing has inn proved mighty suddenly" said she. MT. Wireweed laughed. old woman. old woman. shall we go a. shearing2
 Speak a little louder, sir. I'm very hard of Old woman. old woman, shall kiss you
 dearly?
 Thank you, kind sir. hear very clearly" he chanted.
 "John Augustus Wireweed," said Miss Selina, indignantly, "I believe you've been hearing a lot more than you pretended to-"
 "'Tis love-" sang MT. Wireweed; Hove wouldn't let me hear discourag- ing things, but helped me to hear the right thing"
 Guess you can hear most as good as anybody" said Miss Selina, grim ly.
 Not quite,'' said MT. Wireweed, ''there's lot of variation in it; this happened to be one of my good days"
 "And on your bad days I'll have to split my throat screeching," pro- tested Miss Selina.
 "No," said MT. Wireweed, fsyou won't need to say anything, then. I'll know by intuition what you want to say-or ought to want to say"
 "Oh! And you'll never hear any thing you don't want to, suppose"
 @Of course not; but you won't, either, for you know I'll never say anything mean to you, Selina, dear.
 He slid up close to Miss Selina and slipped his arm around her neat ging- ham waist, and she knew she was engaged to MT. Wireweed.
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-07-25
Girls and Boy. in inc Orient

While the birth of a girl is not mourned over in France, as in certain oriental countries. still it certainly does not call forth the triumphant joy caused by the advent of a boy. The tiny outfit has been tied up with blue ribbons in expectation of the hoped-for boy; should girl be born these are changed for pink.-Ladies' Home Journal.
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-07-25
Malaga Granea.

Malaga is supposed to be the home of Malaga grapes, but in that particu- lar it is largely a misnomer. Malaga grapes used to flourish in that vicini- ty many years ago, but there was a blight that killed off most of the vines, and that special brand of fruit is now chiefly grown elsewhere in spain.-N. Y. Sun.
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-07-25
Vegetable Food Give. strenrtb.

The strongest animals exist entire ly on vegetable food. It is the feroci- ty of the lion rather than his strength that makes him formidable. An elephant is a match for several lions, and is a vegetarian. The ami mals with most speed and endurance -the horse, the reindeer, the ante lcpe and others-are also vegetari- ans.
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-07-25
Mr. r.WIREWEED'S PERSISTENCY
 By Hattie Whitney.
l ccoRDING to her established GUS

lCODyrisAs. Isai. by Authors syndicate.l
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-07-25

Everything marked in plain figures, at prices which defy competition in fhis vicinity. Don't mistake the place. Look for large window with sign over if 62-64 so. MAIN ST.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-08-30
A PUN GOT HIM A LIVING.

A story is told of an English clergy
man who owed his appointment to a
rich living to lucky pun. He was
tutor to the son of nobleman, and
had not long taken orders, when he
attended the funeral of the rector Of
the parish in which the nobleman's
seat was situated.
The father of his pupil was patron
of the living, and was also present at
the funeral Of the deceased rector.
There was young clergyman present
whose grief was SO demonstrative that
the noble patron was much affected by
the sight, and asked if the young man
was son of the deceased gentleman.
ooh, dear, no, my lord-no relation
at ALL" said the tutor.
mo relation!" exclaimed the clergy
man in surprised tone.
None, my lord; he Is the curate,
and l think that he is not weeping for
the dead, but for the living"
His lordship, who was something Of
a wit and cynic himself, was so de-
lighted with the bonmot that he con-
ferred the living upon the ready puns-
ter.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-08-30
SOME FArHERLY ADVICE.

: There is one man in, Cook county
who is bringing up his boys in the
way they should go, and if they don't
70 in it the fault won't be his. One
of his lads stood before him and said:
Father, I'm invited to party, and
there's going to be dancing, and need
a dress suit"
eyes. Well, why don't you get it?"
II haven't the money"
"How old be you?" asked the old
man with sudden interest.
why, you know, father. Nineteen
this MONTH"
"And you want dress suit?"
Eyes. SIR"
1.-THE kind Of rig you can only wear
after sundown?"
Eyes, sir; it's evening Dress"
"Costs like the dickens, and makes
YOU look like waiter in an eating
house,? Huh! Now I've no objection
to your having dress suit-with a
proviso-you must 60 to work and
ssrn 1t. Now hustle"
And the boy is hustling.-Chicago
Exchange.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-08-30

THE sc oRCHIR's DESERVED FATE.
The bicyclist was scorching along
with his head down. S.
The little one had toddled out into
the road, and stood directly In his
path.
The woman saw them both, and
was too much frightened to move. A
quick witted man would have had
time to spring into the road and pull
the little one out of the way, but the
woman seemed helpless.
Suddenly she screamed. 1t was no
ordinary scream, but an ear-splittins
shrek of despair.
The bicyclist|was so startled that
he looked seven ways at once,lost con-
troll of his wheel, hit the curb ana
didn't know where he was for fully
ten minutes.
The child was saved.
A woman is not always so helpless
as she looks.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-08-30
A SALE OF WARTS.

"This theory" said the travelling
man, that warts will go away when
you stop thinking about them may
have something in it, and l am in
clined to have faith in it. know from
actual observation that warts can be
transferred, and will give you the case
In point.
noticed that the hands of the newsboy
were covered with warts. His stand
was within block of my house, but
l am away so much the little fellow
did not know me by name. / said to
him:
You should get some one 10 charm
away those warts" that being the
method of getting rid Of them when
l was boy.
"They amt mine now," he said, II
sold them last week to Teddie Stearns,
and they'll go to him."
Now Teddie Stearns is my own
boy. and l did not like to think Of
his smooth, chubby hands being dis
figured with warts, and we did not
live in wart atmosphere-they be-
long more exclusively to the barefoot
y-with-cheek-of-tan conditions
had been such myself. When went
home l called my boy to me and look
ed with some anxiety at his hands.
They were as clean and white as a
girls.
"'What is it, papa?' he asked curl
ously.
II am looking for warts"
"Oh!' and he drew long, delight
ed breath. there amt any yet, but
they're sure to come, for l bought
them from Carrotty Mike for pin. He
says I'm sure to get 'em. Amt you
glad?'
Glad? I could have cried, and l
believe his mother did cry. But that
blamed little cub said he wouldn't be
a tendeffoot and he would have warts.
/ read the riot act to him and went
away for months trip, and when l
came back he was as proud as Punch,
his hands had grown crop of warts
that discounted anything ever saw in
that line. l hunted up Carrotty Mike,
and, would you believe it, there wasn't
a wart on his hands! He had trans
ferred them all to my boy.'-Chicago
Record.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-08-30
A Sons Devotion.

Wallace, Mich, August Goth: "A
striking example of a mans dutiful and
attentive care Of his mother is seen In
Mr.. Oscar Swanson of this place.
Mr.. Swanson's mother has suffered
much with Kidney and Urinal Trouble
and Female Weakness. Her son has
sought out and procured for her every
thing that he thought could possibly
benefit her.
She did not improve. till at last he
bought her a box of Dodds Kidney
Pills. In a few days she was complete
ly cured, and her faithful son has the
reward for his loving efforts, In the
knowledge that she lis now strong and
well.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-08-30
A Ancient Clock.

An interesting exhibit at the Smith
sonian Institution Is an old German
clock that was ticking about fifteen
years before the birth Of the Great
American republic. 1t keeps good time,
and is 1.J years old. It is made OF
hardwood and the work was ali iona
by hand. Every piece Of the mechan
ism is highly polished, and 1t is put to-
gether with hand-wrought rivets OF
brass. The parts show very little wear,
and the timepiece is SO carefully con-
structed that 1t does not vary a second
In time during twenty-four hours.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-08-30

In London they have a street lamp
which provides a stream Of boiling Wa
ter and dispenses tea. coffee and CO.
Goa. The heat of the lamp warns the
water. and by dropping cent in the
slot gallon OF boiling water may be
had. Two cents brings you milk
sugar, tea. coffee, etc. The light and
heat are provided by the city, which
co-operates with a private corporation
that furnishes the rest.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-08-30
Talking to the Wrong Man.

An Indianapolis woman called up
her grocer by telephone the other
morning, and after she had sufficiently
scolded the man who responded, said:
"And what's more, the next order
YOU get from me will be the last III
ever give you"
at probably will, madam" said the
voice at the other end of the, wire;
you are talking to an undertaken"
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-08-30

The knights of the days Of chivalry
were so well protected by their armor
that they were practically invincib'e to
all ordinary weapons. Even when dis
mounted they could not be injured.
save by the misericorde, thin dag
ger, which penetrated the chains OF
the armor. In more than one battle
knights fallen from their horses could
not be killed until their armor lad
been broken up with axes and ham,
mers.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-08-30
Clothes aat Rick

And cannot be ironed into shape
again without the introduction Of q
starch with medicinal properties. Def
ance starch contains the ISOLATION that
brings all washable goods back to
health or newness. 1t makes any wash
able arcticle Of apparel look like new.
Any grocer will sell you a 1907. pack
age for 10 cents. Use it once and you
will never buy any other Made by
Magnetic Starch Co.. Omaha, Neb.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-08-30
Talking at the Fence.

The way to- get along and keep the
weeds from the different crops is not
to drop your hoe every time you hear
a neighbours wagon coming down the
road and walk to the fence and have
a good old chat. You are robbing your
self OF your own time and your neigh
Dor OF his.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-08-30
Odd Names in Virginia.

One county of West Virginia has
among its political subdivisions the
Slab Fork. the Marsh Fork, the Shady
Spring, the Clear Fork and the Trap
Hill districts. Another has the Pipe
Stem and the Jumping Branch dis
tricts.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-08-30
H0w's Thlaf

We offer One Hundred Dollars reward for any
case OF Catarrh that cannot be cured by Halls
Catarrh Cure.
F. J. CHENEY & CO., Props. Toledo, O.
We, the undersigned, have known F. J.
Cheney for the last 10 years and believe him
perfectly honorable In all business transactions
and financially able to carry out any obliga-
tons made by their firm.
West 4 Truax Wholesale Druggists, Toledo
o.; Waldng, kinnan g. Marvin. Wholesale
Druggists. Toledo Ohio.
Halls Catarrh Cure is taken internally, act
ing directly upon the blood and mucous surfaces
Of the system. Testimonials sent free Price
s5c per bottle Sold by all druggists
Halls Family Pills are the best
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-08-30
Loaded Bee Is Heavy.

Careful weighing, 1t is said, shows
that an ordinary bee, not loaded,
weighs the five-thousandths part Of a
pound, SO that it takes 5000 bees to
make a pound. But the loaded bee,
when it comes in fresh from the fed
and flowers, freighted with hosey. Oft
en- weighs nearly three times more.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-08-30
spanish Coins Of 1911.

While blowing in an old field near
Princeton, which has been In cultiva-
ton for more than fifty years, the
eleven-year-old son of John Crews
unearthed pile of money amounting
to about $500 recently. Some OF the
coins are Spanish, and date back to
the year 1911. Most Of them are, how
ever, American half-dollars. the new
est dating to 1845.