davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

Lady what brought you 10 this de-
plorabic condition.
Tramp Ii wus % love alrair, nm.
Poor mani How very sud. Here's
a quarter for you
"1hauls. ma'a am. Dis VIII kinder
give dat love aJair uY mine boost
You see. it WIS my love for liquor dat
put me on de hog train Chicago
Daily NeWs.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

Guest-Win you kindly tell me how
you cut tins beef so thin?
Waiter - With carving knife.
Why?
Guest-Nothing; only l was just
wondering il il was done with a
safety razor-Jndge.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14
The Dfetrtir and IIygfentc
IL. = 4 4

fsye .tNalter Ralrr Co. of noraheztcr
Mao. I A. have flvrs 3aaH off study
- the tA'i.ui preparation III fnraa ard
chocolate. pnd hafr devised machinery and
syftrms prrdlfar to chem mffhads off tfelt.
p ni Haffahf thc purity paa'ahlitY. and
T. rH ht.asat chsmetrfAaHs ata a..
saincd
Their preparations arr known thc world
over and have received tho highest nHBr.r.
mouts Iram fhe medical practitioner. The
nurae. ,nd the intelligent houzebecper and
esflFt.#
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

sHiLezs fata SIR Flanagan. ioak.
ing from the paper b lar haHa to Ter
husband. Hhe Haa 1=f HIFned tbc torn
pefauce pledge. "ahafe an' a great
daethcf So thaa alcohol do hs fhars
cure for ear1oIIs acid p.ken, an ~ 10 be
yrz haven't aaHf 9IcoAal thin twlef az
much whisky eil do llst 80 vii"
eBe qaIes. tim. Nofah. me dear. an
lay by II good store o. the afHH. share
In thof defp'fit fhcfe's telIn' wAia
II be- ua8in the rimdy." Judge.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14
TrnyeIers CnlI n Bles.ed.

OF all the blessings that railroad COM
pany can confer upon long-suffering pub
lie, none is greater than smokeless coal. The
Lackawanna Railroad burns it, for which
all travellers call that road blessed No
smokel no dust. Its policy may well inspire
the. gratitude and patronage of a grateful
and appreciative public.-Outing.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

Does Mr.. Blimm,zs know much
about horse races?"
No" answered the man with a
faded and experienced look.
How can you tellP"
by the fact that he is willing to
bet on them."-Nashington Star.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14
PRINCESS VIROQUA, M. D.
Endorses Lydia T.. Pinkham's
Vegetable Compound After
Following ITS Record For
Years.

"nEAH Nina. Health Is
che greatest boon bestowed ON human
ity and therefore anything that can
restore lost health Is a blessing l
consider Lydia u. pinlSham's Veg
etabio Compound as blessing to
State and Nation. 1t cures her moth
crs and daughters and makes them
well and strong.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14
A Mrnn nnctnr.

The Doctor (after seeing Mrs.
Smythel Its nothing serious.
Mr., Smythe-No2
The Doctor-No; l told her a trip
abroad would prove anything but
beneficial to her in her present state.
Mr.. smythe with a sigh Of relief
Shake, Brooklyn Life.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14
&17j5F.lzz51; ;izsidaza p
That settled II

He had taken au uuuafranted iiber-
= n critieH.ag her nsa hat. Il pro-
eaEed her. She Haf about 10 say that
saa didn't propose 10 be dictated 70
hF amy man. Bat she didn't say IT.
All hc sad vas
Il Go rot propaae-"
THeu be interrupted Ter.
aIfyoudid." D." be sm.liuely murmured.
= should certainly fay ses."
And that seemed 10 settle tilt
BIZ.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

She WAS Boston maiden whom
They took about the town.
And showed the interesting things
In upper town and down.
They went 10 cold storage place;
it made EN- all feel queer
tn hear the Boston maid remark:
ITS very warm IN hereN'
-Nonkers Statesman.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

No matter what ails YOU headache To a
cancer. You rlli never got we'll untl your
bowels are put right tasearets help nature,
cure sou without a gtipo or pam, produce
easy, natural movements, cost you just 10
gents % start getting your health back
Cascarcta Candy tutharlic, the genuine put
op IN metal boxes. every tablet has 4. [. {.
stamped on b. Beware ai mutations
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

"What splendid language Mr.. Cho-
kah uses in his sermonsl"
Yes. indeed. But. then, what can
you expect? His sermons are invari-
ably made up of flve-eighths Bible and
three-eighths Shakespeare" = Cleye-
land Plain Dealer
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14
CABBAGE CARRIER.
How To Make One That Il Light and
Durable and Can he Carried
Between Rows.

The cabbage carrier figured and de-
scribed by Rawson in his work on
market gardening is light and durable
and can easily be carried between the
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

"Hit beats all, exclaimed Uncle
Eph'm, chow de slot machine business
is a-growin'. After awhile you'n be
droppin' penny in de slot an gittin'
religion. Chicago Tribune.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

The ways to gain this worlds applause
Arc various ard complex.
Some set the same by writing books
And some 10y writing checks.
Washington Star.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14
A Change of Base.

Yeast-I see + Philadelphia composer has
written a quickstep.
Crimsonbeak-Yes, and l hear they are
using it in Chicago Tor funeral march,
1onkers Statesman.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

Waiter-I beg your pardon, sirl I
never had such thing happen before.
Customer wish TO gracious vou
had! Then you might have been more
careful this time!-Brooklyn Life.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

1t IA uo3 hafd to let rour modrtat ION bc
kuowu tc an men. so Ian as the virtues are
concerned Ram's llatn.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14
To SuIt the Case.

Jake-Cora has an aquilire nose, hasn't
she?
Fake-Iiow could | know? She always
turns it up at me.-Harem Life.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

Bssaaee haf shakespo poafas self has said
g. laHa#
A reason chat IfH sure
'rTHafe's d divinity that shapes our enda'-
Ard Hha=a thr manicure
-J4lgH
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

Billy Binks =Ah old chap, you
don't know what swell people ! comes
Of Why. I've got real blue blood in
my tciusi
slnmpy Georgc-Ahl I've often
wondered wot made yer nose that ere
color!-Ally Sloper.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

The change from a job to a situation is
not always appreciated by the incumbent;
as, for instance, when a political Job be-
comes an embarrassing situation.-Puck.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

Flrihy No. I've given up calling on
Niss RaXley" Jlggs All I suppose her
fsthcf had a hand iu thal1' Fllib> We'll
-.er not a hand. cNelly 80 Philadelphia
prrgt
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

Pso's Cure for Consumption is an infalli-
bic medicine for coughs and colds.-N. w.
Samuel. Ocean Grove. N. j. Feb. II, 1000.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14
Then He Gets Noisy.

Mrs. Biggs-Your husband isn't much for
show. he always dresses very quietly.
Mrs. Diggs-Huh! You ought to hear him
sometimes when his collar button rolls un-
der the dresser.-Chieago Daily News.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14
Hoped They would Run Their Course

Mrs Vernon B7own-Why ON earth don't
you get your husband to cut off his whis-
kersg
Mrs Smffian Jones-I wouldn't have him
do it for the world. l want him to let them
grow and get them all out of his SYSTEM
Stray Stories
In the millennium, of course, a woman
will be only as old as she thinks she looks
Town Topics.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

Landlady Our Shakespeare club Is
To discuss the character of Cassius to-
night
Boarder Did you know Cassius9
Landlady What question? OF
course. not.
Boarder-I didn't know but he
boarded here. he WAS lean and hun
cry you know Brooklyn Life.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

stops the Cough and Works
on the Cold.
Laxative Bromo Quinine Tablets. Price 25c.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

or course. wheu we speak of tcrcmfots
breeding ,ice. we do not refer 10 vel bred
sicc Pack
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

A+@NhsNtt+h 'ANAsAaA anu A#NtNhANAs
For fifteen years | have noted the
effect of your Vegetable Compound in
curing special diseases Of women.
~ know OF nothing superior for
ovarian trouble, barrcnness, and IL
has prevented hundreds of dangerous
operations where physicians claimed
~ was the only chance TO get well.
liberation and inflammation of the
womb has been cured in two or three
weeks through its use, and as l find IL
purely an herbal remedy, l unhesitat.
sngly give 1t my highest endorsement.
-Fraternally yours. DIR. p. VmoeUA,
Lansing, Mich. 5000 forfeit n assge fss-
eizanizi is not senulEe.
If YOU are ill do not hesitate To
get a bottle of Lydia Il. Pink
ham's Vegetable Compound at
once, and write to Mrs. Pink
ham at Lynn, Mass. for special
advice; il Is entirely free.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14
He's Getting Even.

Trl,vet Did YOU hear of the dread
fu, revenge rockingham took on
Miss pmliug when she refused his
proposal2
Dicrr What was it9
Trv,et lie proposed 60 her moth
er. as Mrs pmling MAS a widow, and
now he won't let a mar come TO tho
house to see his stepdaughter.-Gh Chi
cago Journal.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14
PRICE,25
Her Circulating Medium.

She's a very cautious woman. Especial
ly about gossip. No woman ever heard her
retail any scandal"
But | am told that stories confded to
her in secrecy do get out somehow"
Yes, / know. You see, she tells them all
to her husband cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

Tourist Ton vacation. "a he meets n stroll.
er along the roadl | saf you are the first
one that have met tn half an hours walk.
is Il always a. dead as this IN this neigh
borhnoaf
Native Dcad9 Wnraci II it wasn't for
an occasional funeral IN the place YOU would
pot see lifc hefe from one end oil the vrnr
10 The other ~ y Times
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14
Had Him There.

"How crazy you women act over the
tope o wSeg5e Pag s%d Mr. fGzen9y Wen9 bS IN
the papers don't have Mans page too?"
They do" Mrs. Pozenby replied.
I've never seen one
"Oh, yes, you have. It's the page devoted
to prize fighting and horse racing and other
occupations OF that sort. YOUTHS Com
panion.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14
snrnr frnm ontsIdc.

Miss Backbay--I don't like your
friend Mr.. Gotham. lie remarked To
me last night TINT there were no
pretty girls in Boston.
Miss knickerboclIer- ridicu-
lousl
Miss Backbay Wasn't IL?
Miss knickcrbocker- because
there are always some New York
girls visiting there. - Philadelphia
Press
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14
Persons contemplating a tourney East ol

Persons contemplating journey East or
West should be eareii rat the rates paid
for their transportation o not exceed those
charged by the Nickel l.ute Road.
This company always offers lowest rates
and the service is efficient. Careful at
tention Is given to the wants of all first
and second class passengers by uniformed
eolored attendants. The dining car service
OF the Nickel Plate Road is above criticism
and enables the traveller to obtain meals
at from thirty-fve (95) cents to $l.OO but
no higher.
grade standard. Semi-weekly transconfi-
mental tourist cars ply between Atlantic
and Pacific Coasts. Confer with nearest
agent of the Nickel Plate Road.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

Half an hour ia all the time required 10
dye with PUTNAM FADELlsSS DYES.
The Scranton chronicle., 1901-12-14

Loyal Cracksman l may not be
much of soldier, but do as much
drilling rs any of them. n. \. World.
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-11-07
BROOKLYN BRIEFS

Patrick Gaughan of the Watert0wn road has returned from q weeks visit
 With relatives Ill Wisconsin.
 The members of the Daughters of the Covenant of the Third Congrega- tionai church are making preparations Tor a grand entertainment at the church on Thursday evening, Noyem- Der 21.
 1.-The Iyceum contained another
 large crowd last evening. The cantata "A Festival of Flowers. was prettily rendered by twenty-one little girls.
 The children showed that they had
 been finely trained and tlcy enacted their various roles i'll satisfattoi'y
 mahner. Tonight there will be negro specialties by Moss and Barlow. and I plano solo by Miss Lizzie Enright. Fo garty and Gallagher. the well known
 musicians, will delight all wit. tlie;r selections. Many suppers are being served each evening, while ftere is such q large crowd at the ice cream booth each evening that many ar. won dering whether the attraction is the delicious ice cream of the fair young waitresses. Lallier's orchestra fin-
 nished music and Prof BouffartI ,s tie
 prompter.
 -1n ne HrSt issue of the Parish. q
 monthly publication which is devoted
 to the interests of the Third Congrega-
 tlonal church, made it's appearance last
 sunday. It is four-page paper, and
 has neat typographical appearance. One thousand copies of the paper were published It's news columns consist more of matters relating to the church than with literary pursuits It's pur- pose Is to awaken enthusiasm among tne church members for church work.
 Besides it's bright and interesting ed- torltls 1t contains among many other
 things q calendar of the church events durlng the coming month. the subjects TOT sunday evening services, Friday night prayer meetings and system of daily Bible readings The pdifor,js ina pastor of the church. the Rev Charles
 E. Granger, and J. Burton Benson is l the business manager.
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-11-07
II HUNG CHANG DEAD.
Great Man of China" Yields al
 Last.

Great Man of China" Yields at
 Last.
 PEKING, Nov. !.--Li Hung Cnars died at II o'clock this morning.
 Earl Ii had been unconscious for more than twenty-four hours preceding his death. and 1t was announced at noon yesterday by his physicians that he could survive only few hours.
 At an early hour last night, as the patient lay ill comatose state, his bur- ial clothes were placed on him, as is al- ways done when the end is certain. At 9 D. III. he began breathing plainly and showed unexpected vitality.
 The courtyard of the yamen was fill ed with life size paper horses and chairs, with coolie bearers, which the earrs friends were sending, in accord ance with Chinese custom. to be buried with him in order to carry his soul to heaven.
 Several of the ministers of the vari- ous powers called to express sympathy. Lii Hung Chang, whose many sided characteristics won for him the various appellations of "the Talleyrand of Asia," the "Machiavelli of Chinese di-
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-11-07
MANAGER BAKER RESIGNS.
Retires From the Southern New Eng
 land Telephone Company.

Retires From the Southern New Eng
 land Telephone Company.
 D. B. Baker. of New Haven, who has been the general superintendent of the Southern New England Tele- phone company since it's organization. has rendered his resignation, to take effect on May 1 next. He gives no reasons for his resignation and he does not say what his plans for the future may be. It is reported. howev- CT. that after a vacation he will be- come officially connected with inter- ests to which his long service Tn tele- phones and telegraph service will be valuable AIr Baker was one Of the pioneers in the telephone business in the country. and probably outranks any other person in the country i'll con tinuous and active telephone service, having built and owned the telephone exchange at Meriden, which was open ed in January, 1878. and which was the second telephone exchange eStab- lished i'll the world. h April, 1879, the Meriden exchange was bought by the Western Union Telegraph com pany and Mir Baker entered the latter company's employ, afterward building and opening the exchanges in Spring field and Holyoke. Mass. Tn the spring of 1880 the Western Union and Bell interests were consolidated and the territory of Connecticut was as- signed to the Connecticut Telephone company, which has since become the Southern New England Telephone company. MT Baker was appointed general superintendent and since that time he has personally superintended the building and equipment of all the company's exchanges and lines in the state. Mir Baker is prominent in Ma sonic and military circles, being presi- dent of the Knights Templars club of New Haven and member of Major Clark's staff of the Second company. Governors Foot guard. He is also q member of the Old Guard of New York and of the Putnam Phalanx of Hartford.
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-11-07
\ Costly Blaze In pittsburg,

PITTSBURG,. Nov. 7.-The immense plant of Dilworth Porter X Co, manu- facturers of steel rods and railroad spikes. was damaged by fire last night to the extent of about $230,000. The plant, which was the largest of its kind in the world, with an output of 100000 tons. covered sixteen acres of ground on the south side between Fourth and Sixth streets, including in its equip lnent many buildings. Seven acres were burned over. and much valuable machinery was destroyed. Members if the firm say the loss is fully covered by insurance.
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-11-07

plomacy'' and the Grand Old Man of China,'' was in all respects the most re- markable product of the peculiar civili- zation of his country. Three thousand years of darkness followed Confucius. Then Ii Hung Chang came into being, and through him the regeneration of China was effected, and it became more to the occidental understanding than q mere blur of queer people and quaint customs.
 The viceroy was born in 1922, the same year that saw the birth of Gen. eral Grant, fact to which the China man often referred with singular pride. Next to "Chinese" Gordon he regarded General Grant as the greatest man that ever lived outside of China. When he was in the United States in 1896 Earl Ii reyerently and affectionately planted the two small trees that may still be seen on the north lawn of Grants tomb on Riverside drive and he never lost an opportunity to pay a tribute to his friend.
 Although he began with neither for tune nor influence, I4i Hung Chang ac- 
 his official career fortune estimated at about $400 100000. Through every turn of fate he managed to hold on to his wealth. Repeatedly stripped of his feather and yellow Jacket that denoted that he was of the highest rank in the kingdom, he accepted his humiliations with true Confucian philosophy and calmly waited, knowing that ere long China would need him in an hour of
 So often was he stripped of his rank and restored to power when the king dom was endAgcred and his steady hand was needed at the helm of the ship of state that his name is insepa- rably linked with every crisis in the kingdam As matter of fact, since he entered public life in his youth I4i Hung Chang indeliblE stamped the im- press of his personal character on Chi
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-11-07
STATE BOARD OF CHARITIES.
Met Yesterday Afternoon at the Cap
 itol in Hartford

HUI III l1dIllOAu.
 Hartford, Nov 1.-The regular monthly meeting of the state board of charities was held yesterday after noon at it's office i'll the capitol. The members present made reports of work since the last meeting as fol lows:
 Dr Down of this city reported q quarterly visit to the state prison.
 Miss R. G. Bacon of New Haven re- ported considerable work among coun- ty home children, and T visit to the House of the Good Shepherd at Spring field, where there are several wards from Connecticut.
 Miss Hall of Hartford reported yis- its to almshouses or town poor i'll Say brook, Bristol, Pennington. West Hartford, Plainvifie and Southington. She also reported attendance at the annual meetings of ehe temporary homes in Middlesex. rolland Wind ham, New London and Hartford coun- ties. Miss Hall reported further q visit to the Perkins Institute TOT the . Blind i'll Boston, where there are sev- enteen Connecticut pupils, and states that the Connecticut pupils are a cred it both to the state and to the institu- tion She reported. also, visits to St Mary's home and to the state prison
 MT Bridgman reported q visit with Secretary Kellogg to the almshouse at Tariffville, where they found some i'm proyement since the last visit.
 Secretary Kellogg reported attend ance at the annual meeting of tempo rary homes ill four counties, and visits to inspect town poor in Cromwell, Danbury, Bethel and New London also visits to the state prison. Hai.- ford jail, New London jail and hospl- tai, jail, and Children's home and St hospital, Children's home and St Johns home; Cromwell hall, and the kindergarten for the blind and St Francis's hospital, Hartford.
 Appointments to visit state fnstitu- tions for the fall quarter were made as follows: State prison. Miss Bacon and NIr Spencer; school for boys. Miss Bacon and Dr Down; hospital for the insane, and industrial school for girls, Miss Hall and MT Bridgman. The board will meet again on the first Wednesday of December at the usual time.
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-11-07
MERRIMACs MADE MERRY.
First Annual Sociable Given by Attn
 letic Club Last Night.

First Annual Sociable Given by Attn
 letic Club Last Night.
 The fourth annual sociable given by the Merimac A. c. was the attraction at the city hall last evening. A large crowd was present. Before the dane ing the following program was rem dered by Lawson's orchestra:
 March, The Grotto. '.......... Fulton Selection, ''The Governors Son Meyer Southern Reyeries .......... BendiX Hunky Dory ...............H Holtzman Galop. Jolly Good Fellows. '... Austin
 The grand march. ill which seventy five couples participated, was led by William Ghent and Miss Catherine Me- Evoy Dancing followed. Professor Leo Herr was prompter. The fine success of the affair is due to the mem bers of the following committees: Ar engagement committee. Thomas Dris- coll, William Ghent. James Downey, James Hayes, William F. Mcdonald. Jeremiah Ring. Floor committee, grand conductor. Thomas Driscoll; William Ghent. Joseph Cassidy. Mi- chael Ryan. William r. Mcdonald, Wil- liam McDonald, James Downey, Pat rick Scadden, Edward Byrnes. Re ception committee. James Downey, Thomas Driscoll. William r. McDon- aid, William Ghent, Edward Howard, Michael Ryan, Timothy Ryan, Jere- miah Ring, Charles Dunlap, John Mates, James Lawler, Joseph Cassidy. Albert Budd, William Mcdonald, Jo- seph Egan, William Alderman, John Marr Michael Slavin. George Byrnes, Patrick Scadden. Michael Carroll, Will liam Judd. Thomas Kenney, John Hayes, Joseph Slavin. Albert Adams, James Kelley, John Downey, James Ryan. Thomas Ryan, Patrick Walch, Thomas Lynch, James Hayes, Patrick O'Brien, Thomas Egan, Thomas Kelley William Cosgrove, John Leary, James Mooney, Martin Meyers, Philip Chris tian.
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-11-07
FAULKNER,s BoNDsMEN.

New Britain, Nov 7.-At meeting of the common council last night the matter of the settlement with c. II. Faulkner's bondsmen was taken up and it was voted to accept the com- promise of S3,000, the case to be settled by November P. The bondsmen were responsible for nearly $10.00O of the S1G.000.
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-11-07
Fire In Sioux City. Ia.

SIOUX CITY, Ia., Nov. Fire yhich broke out in the Gunther X Sul is wholesale toy and notion house in his city at 9:30 o'clock last evening de ,troyed the buil6ing, and neighboring buildings were endangered. The loss estimated at eianna.
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-11-07
SUICIDE BY GAS.
searchers for Missing Man Nearly
 Blew Themselves Up.


 New Haven, Nov 7.--Louis Resnick, German grocer, was missed from his place of business on Pine street, near AtWater, ill Fair Haven, yesterday and search instituted. The odor of gas was noticed coming from the cellar yesterday afternoon and when the mans nephew struck light there, an explosion resulted that badly burned him on the head and set the store on fire.
 The fire department put out the blaze and i'll the cellar came on the body of Resnick, who had been dead several hours. He had apparently shut himself into a cellar room and then turned on the gas. Despondency from ill health is said to have been the cause of his suicide.
Waterbury Democrat., 1901-11-07
Postomce Robbed.

ROANOKE, Va, Nov. 1.-The post office al Princeton, w. Va, county seat of Mercer county, has been robbed. The safe was cracked and between $500 and S350 In stamps and $100 in money stolen. Some tools taken from a blacksmith shop were found in the postoffice, and Lewis McNutt, a color ed employee of the blacksmith shop, mas been arrested.