The Dawson news. (Dawson, Ga.) 1889-current, 1901-08-07

tionary. You know what condiments
are, don't you?"
"Of course. He vhas in a small jar
at feefty cents"
"Well, Mrs. O'Sullivan wanted to con-
suit me about the condiments, and
made her out a list. She gave you
quite a large order yesterday, didn't
she?"
"Yes, she buys cucumbers, tomatoes,
cheese, crackers, herrings und beer"
Exactly. That's the list gave her,
and she got lemonade and ice cream
somewhere else. Then she borrowed
eight or ten chairs from across the
street, hired a fiddler for so cents, had
the children's faces washed and was
all ready for the grand event. Her man
Tim scrubbed the coal dust off his face,
had his hair cut and was home an hour
ahead of time. The guests were in
vited to come early and stay a week,
and they began to arrive at o'clock
1t was a proud moment in the life of
the O'Sullivans when the procession be-
gan to move, and three of Tins coal
yard friends marched at the head. Do
you go much in society, Mr.. Wasser-
man.?
"Vhell, I goes init my wife to some
summer gardens once in so1se whiles"
! "That's society, Of course, but not
| the swaggerist sort. You ought to
have seen our crowd. If 1 as janitor
felt that l was bigger than an alder
man, what must have been the pride
and dignity of the O'Sullivans? There
was the secondhand furniture man
and his wife, the carpet cleaner and
his wife, the fish man and his daugh-
ters, the chair Gamer, the pawnbroker,
the secondhand clothier and a dozen
others, and they were all rugged out in
their best and had their Fifth avenue
bows and scrapes.'
"Maype it vhas better dan some Buff
falo Bill shows" suggested the grocer.
1T beat 'em all hollow, and l was go
| ing around with my chest swelled out
and stepping high when suddenly re-
membered that l hadn't been invited.
Yes, sir, as true as you live had been
left out I'd helped Mrs. O'Sullivan to
! arrange everything. and then she'd Civ
en- me the fhrowdown. I'd just felt the
Jar to my feelings when l caught sight
of the Countess Divito pacing up and
down the lower hall with a stiletto in
| hand.
"'Whata you tinka, eh?" she said to
me. Data woman give grande party
and leava me outa-me, de Countess
Divito! Ha, hav
"And 1 went up stairs and found the
colored Mrs Torrington pacing up and
down with a razor in her hand, and she
said to me:
"'Janitor, Tze bin giben de cold
snub, an I'ze gwine to slash somebody
wild dis razor if dey don't look out "
"Some troubles vhas coming, eh?
asked the grocer.
For sure. You may socially snub a
/ ianitor with the asthma, and he is
obliged to put up with it, but when you
socially snub a woman then beware.
l saw that l would get my revenge
without mixing in, and l went down to
my room in the basement and waited
.'Und did something's happen, Mr..
Sprocket?"
"You bet your grocery, Mr. Wasser-
man! Yes, sir, that grand reception
wasn't an hour old when somebody
wanted to know if beer and lemonade
and ice cream and cheese sandwiches
wouldn't double up dog, and he was
| fov narVpOI IDAJ
started the row, and l sat there with
nv asthma until they had broken the
windows, smashed the doors and were
larruping each other through the halls.
Then | sent kid out for the police
and the patrol wagon took % Of EN-
to the station at once. That's what
comes of snubbing janltor.
"Und dot party vhas broke In two"
"She was"
"Und eaferpody goes to shall!
'"The whole gang.
"Und Mrs. O'Sullivan don't be IN DOT
swim?'
"Not a swim, Mr.. Wasserman. In
stead of going to the top OF society
she's dropped clear down to the foot'
or. as Mrs. Divito put it:
"'Data swella lada from Ireland
she TAXA a rida in de patrol wag'
"vhell, dot vhas shust how pellef'
said the grocer as he wrapped up two
cucumbers and handed them to the
ianitor. eff somepody vhas sWeii' ne
yhas all right, but if he vhasn I sven
md can't be swell it vhas no use 10
swell around und bust himself to pieces
und get some free rides to dot ponce
- N. QUAD.