The National tribune., 1901-01-17
THE STORY OF SOME "MULE.EARs."
Pie-vender's Sad Experience in Trying to
Get Rich Of Uncle Sans Boys.

| Get Rich Of Uncle Sans Boys.
| EDITOR NATIONAL TRIBUNE: Your e1-
ceilent paper comes to our home regu-
larry. We hail it as did the soldier Of
| the civil war the arrival of mail from
home. I wish to relate one of many
amusing incidents that 1 witnessed dur
| ing the three Yeas of duty at the front,
and at the same time to inquire il all
| of the comrades of my old and noble regi-
| ment, the Goth ILL.,, are dead, or why it
| is that we never hear or see anything in
| The NATIONAL TRIBUNE of any of them.
| In the Summer of 1862 we were camped
Mt Martinsburg, Va. A couple of Skin
| mishes with Ashby's cavalry were the ex-
tent of our fighting at that time. The
| people of the vicinity were intelligent,
generous. ard many of them loyal
to the old flag, and no better cooks
could be found on earth than were the
good mothers in the Shenandoah Valley.
These people soon learned that there were
good prices and a ready market in our
camp for their fruits, cakes, pies, butter,
chickens, etc. We had plenty of wild
cat and Confederate money and little
of Lincoln skim Tor grcenback money!.
With plenty of money and market full
of good things to eat the average soldier
is happy.
The yender in this incident first APP
peared in our camp with heavy, two
wheeled cart, drawn by Il very small mule.
His stock in trade consisted of probably
100 or more pies. They were made in
crescent shape. or rs half-pies.
Mother, Mt home, i'll finishing her pie
making, used to make of remnant not
sufficient for whole pie half-pie. She
called it Il turnover" We soldiers called
these the vender had ''mule-cars." The
vender called them pumpkin custards.'
His price was only p cents each, or at
the rate of 30 cents for n whole pie. AS
| we had plenty of money those pies. even
| at this extOrtiOnate price, were soon dis
posed Of The vender departed from
camp, perhaps with more money and of
greater variety than he had eve: owned
| at one time before.
1t was amusing to see the looks we gave
one another as we began the task of eat
ing these pumpkin custards.' The pie
crust was not India rubber but the more
we chewed it the more it was not ready
| to swallow. Some said the Shortening"
| was put in the wrong way; but this was
| a mistaken idea, for [ am sure there was
no shortening" in the crust. The pump
kin custard," or filling, was plain sweet
| potato, in its natural fatness-no milk,
| eggs or spices. And we Illinois fellows
| knew what good pies We're.
We considered ourselves sold cheap"
OF course we had no idea this cunning
old swindler would ever be seen in our
camp again. But, to our great surprise,
some days later it was announced that
the "muie-ear' man was coming. The
next thing was to find our leader in mis-
| chief Il will not give his name at this
writing. but he was best known in our
regiment as ''our deviPD. He was soon
on hand. The vender this trip had q
spring-wagon, drawn by the small mule
and an old horse. He had prospered on
our grecnbacks. Our man instructed us
to get our largest bills of money, climb
onto the wagon, all try to buy at once,
and hand back the pies at every unno-
ticed chance to the boys surrounding the
wagon.
This program was followed out The
pies were quickly passed back to the boys
and were as quickly hidden inside shirts
or down trouser legs. Before the yender
had collected for a single pie twO-thirds
of them were gone. When he discovered
his loss he became frantic and attempted
on the wheels the team could not make Il
start. Our Devil" was so filled with
sympathy for the yender or the team that
he ordered us off the wagon. Then the
start was made. We all followed. beg
ging a chance to buy pies. He stopped
in front of Col. Stewards tent, and, adj
dressing our Colonel as General" with
tears in his eyes, explained that he was
ruined; ruined, sub; ruined"
After the Colonel had asked concern
ing his runation he asked us if any of
us had taken any of his pies without pay
ing for them. l think every man in the !
regiment answered No. The Colonel then
told him 20 point out anyone who owed |
him for n pie, and he would collect it from |
him. OF course, no collections were made |
One of the officers told him that perhaps |
the hindend gate of the wagon had opened !
as he drove up hill, and in that way he
lost his pies; he knew better, but left |
camp not as rich as he expected to be. We |
bombarded the Colonels tent with mule |
ears; some were seen playing whip jack |
ct with them.
Would be pleased to hear from some |
comrade who played whip jacket with |
some of those mule ears.'-J. +. CAR |
MICHAEL, Co. III, Goth H., Chillocothe,
Mo.
W. II. Coleman address not giyen) |