The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1901-09-04
Schley, Sampson, Maclay aud "Mr,
DOOley."

"Mr. Dooley" has arrived at the con-
clusion that his chief claim to renown
is the fact that he "niver took hand
in tn war in Cuba" Those who did
take part in the war, whether in Cuba
or the Philippines,he finds, have missed
fame by wide margin.
"First they was Hobson. He kissed
a girl an ivrybody says: Hang him.
Kill tn coal-scuttler.
chin they was Dewey. He got mar
ried an tn people was FIR maxim ma
thrimony penal offense.
eye raymimber Gomez Ye recall,
Hinnissy, how tn correspondents used
to poke their way 10 thu jungle where
he set maxim his simple meal iv tn
leg iv q SCORPION an piece iv sugar
cane, an offer him tn freedom iv tn
city of Moo York whin tn war was
over. Well, he wint ID Moo York las
week, this George Wash'nton iv tn
Ant Hills. He was met at tn ferry
boat be a raYporther that twishted his
head around to take phottygraft iv
him en- called him Nanny an said
he looked like Mike Feely, tn aldher-
man iv tn third ward, only darker A
comfy iv seegar makers waited on him
an asst him to jine their union, an that
was all tn honors he had.
Freedom iv TIL city, says YEP Oh,
he got that, an all iv that. He was
free 10 go an come without anybody
payin amy attintion to him. He was
as flee as tn air, because tn polls
didn't know him. If they'd known,
he might been locked up.
can now it's Schley's turn. l knew
it was comm to Schley an heer it
comes. Ye used to think he was a
gram man that whin OF Cerveera come
out iv tn harbor at Santiago called out
Come on, boys,' an plunged into th'
Spanish feet and rayjooced 1t to scrap
iron.
"That's what ye thought an that's
what 1 thought, an we were wrong.
We were wrong, Hinnissy. I've been
r-readin' thrue history iv tn cam
paign be wan iv tn gr-reatest history
ians now employed as clerk in tn
supply stores iv tn Brooklyn navy
yard. Like mesilf, he's freside
vethran iv tn war.
He's mimber iv TIL Martin Dooley
Post No. l, Defenders iv tn Hearth.
He's tn boy FIR ye. If liver he beats
his sugar scoop into soord, yell think
OF Farragut was lady cook on lum-
Der barge.
Essays tn historyian: 'Th' conduck
iv Schley dunn tn campaign was such
as to bring tn bright blush iv shame to
ivry man on TIL pay roll iv our beloved
country. IT'S well known that whin
ordered be tn gallant Jawn d. Long to
lave Hampton Roads, he thried to Jump
overboord san' swim ashore. He was
chloryformed an KEEP undher matches
till tn ship was off tn coast iv Floridy.
"'Whin he come to, he tainted at tn
sight iv Spanish ditchnry, an whin a
midshipman whit by with box iv Cas
tile soap, he fell on the deck within
in fear an exclaimed: eth war is
over. I'm shot.
"'Of Cyenfoogoose he see starvin'
reconcentrado on tn shore an cried
out: "There's Cerveera. Tell him to
come on bcord an accept me soord."
"He was knocked down be belayin'
pin in highlands iv the gunner's mate
an carried to Sandago. Whin the ca
tiff wretch an cow'rd see brave Ger
veera comm out iv tn harbor he r-run
up tn signal: "Cease film. Pm a
prisoner"
GOWN to tn profanity of daunt-
less Bob WINS, which was arisin in a
dark purple column at TIL time, Ger
veera cud not see this recreent message
an attimpted to r-run away. Th'
American admiral followed him like
thu cow'rd that he was, describin' a
loop that I'd dhraw FIR ye if tn head
bookkeeper'd lind me pencil, an
rammin' the Ioway, tn Massachusetts
ah' tn Oregon.
"'His face was Fred with fear an
he cried in a voice that cud be heard
tn length iv the ship: "He don't see
TIL signal. I've surrindered, Cerveera.
Pm done. quit. Pm all in. Come
and take me soord an cut off me but
tons. Boys, fire few iv thin eight
inch shells an ATTRACT his attintion.
That was good wan. Give him some
more. R-run alongside an ram him
II nicisary. Rake him fore an aft.
There goes his biler. Now, perhaps
he'll take notice. Great hivins, we're
lostl He's sinkin' before we can sur.
rinderS Get out me divin' shoot, boys,
an III go afther him and capitulate.
Oh, war is turrible thingl
"'I have attimpted to be fair with
Admiral Schley. If Pm not, It's his
own fault an mine. 1 can on'y add
that It's tn opinyion iv all tn boys in
TIL store that he ought to be hanged,
drawn, quarthered, burnt at tn stake