davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Savannah morning news., 1901-10-22
Did Not Appreciate Joke.

Three sandwich men were patrolling
the sidewalk on the shady side of Mas
sau street the other day, says the New
York Tribune. Each bore sign on
which the advertiser had expended
the most fantastic adjectives in his
vocabulary, and in which the paint had
been applied in the weirdest way the
artist could think of. But nobody look
ed at the signs, and the hurrying
crowds jostled the melancholy process
sion, as if emphasizing their opinion
that the three men might better find
more useful job and get out of the way
of those who have to work.
"Our biz is on the bum" said the
foremost rank of the little procession.
Like as we be-" said the centre
men.
"Well soon be back shovellin' coal"
responded the rear rank, as he dropped
his head.
A messenger boy who had just spent
his last cent in a mutoscope gallery
overheard this talk. Prompted by a
sudden impulse he snatched a card off
book store open air counter and pin
ned il to the rear rank. The sign read:
THE Sorrows of Satan, 10 cents each"
A laugh went up from the bystanders
who saw it. As the joke spread the
crowd at the heels of the trio increased.
At last the rear rank discovered the
cause of his unwonted popularity and
tore the sign from his coat tail.
Yer ought ter be losing yer Job"
Indignantly yelled the disappointed boy,
and finding no ready answer, he ad-
ded: your boss wants de people to
look at yer, and den when they do yer
spite de game"
go on, you" retorted the rear rank.
Amt yet got any pride about yer?"
and taking a tug at his sandwich
straps he followed his leader into a
side street.
Dat was good Joke. said the mes
senger, as he went back TO the muto-
scopes, but de buns couldn't depreci-
ate e."
The Savannah morning news., 1901-10-22

A practical joker recently cabled a
friend Of his that the latter's sister
was dying in a European city, where
to be at the time. The brother left at
once for Europe and has just returned.
The Louisville Courier-Journal, COM
menting on the incident. is led to re-
mark: THE only way to put any hui
NOR in practical joke is to kill the
practical joker. 1t is true that would
not be irresistibly funny. but it would
be funnier than a practical joke. 1t
would be sensible as well as funny for
it would leave the world with one
hopeless ass less"
The Savannah morning news., 1901-10-22

The experience of the British army
in South Africa has served to relegate
TO the domain hitherto held sacred to
chain armor and battle axes and other
weapons of the Middle Ages the lance
and saber. Possibly this states the
matter broadly. but the truth is that
in the wars of the future the hitherto
Characteristic cavalry weapons will
scarcely be used. What the London
Telegraph calls "the enormous posi-
bilities of the modern rifle" have
taught army experts that a cavalry
charge, dashing and beautiful as it is.
won't do in modern warfare. and the
lance and saber are practically useless
to the dismounted soldier.
The Savannah morning news., 1901-10-22

The need Of more engineer officers
in the navy is urgently stressed in the
annual report Of Rear Admiral Mel
Vile, chief engineer. The duties of the
engineer officers take them away from
the fighting when it occurs and the
billet otherwise dissgreeable, is not
sought by the spirited young gradu-
ates Of Annapolis. Yet the value Of
the trained engineer officer is full as
great as that Of his fighting messmate
OF the tops and turrets. and Admiral
Melville's recommendations should be
followed. He wants young officers as
signed arbitrarily 10 duty in the en-
CINE room and warns the department
that unless this Is done the only al
ternauye Will be- 10 commission the
WaTraat officers Of the navy.
The Savannah morning news., 1901-10-22

Richard Croker has published book.
1t is entitled Political Cartoons, Gath
cred by Their Target" and contains
illustrations depicting the Tammany
sachem or as the newspapers have
now learned to call him. The Squire, ."
in the commission of all the crimes
with which during many years he has
been charged every day. 1t requires
either perfect innocence or an audac-
ity that verges on the sublime to take
the step which has seemed advisable
to Mr.. Croker.
The Savannah morning news., 1901-10-22

Connecticut judge has refused to
accept the testimony of a woman as
conclusive Of the drunkenness OF a
man. The judge said he was not sat
isf1ed woman can distinguish when
a man Is drunk and that she might
come to such a conclusion when the
man was only mildly mellow or, in
deed, when the drinks he had con-
stunned had affected nothing other than
his breath
The Savannah morning news., 1901-10-22

A typographical union in New York
has refused admission to an applicant
for membership on the ground that he
is a member Of the National Guard,
and efforts are now being made 10 Sc
cure his discharge from the state serv-
ice. That mans enlistment IN the
service Of his state should render him
ineligible 10 membership IN labor
union that prides itself upon IT'S strict
compliance with law 10 either absurd
" worse,
The Savannah morning news., 1901-10-22

A few days ago we noticed the zeal
shown by Chicago lover who had fol-
lowed the girl of his heart from that
city to Berlin and who was in a peck
of trouble because a heartless guardian
had shipped the girl back to this coun-
try. Even then we reminded the de-
spondent one that all the berths in all
the ships between Germany and Amer
lea had not been engaged and he seems
to have taken the hint before he heard
of it. Before the vessel on which his
inamorata sailed had left European
waters the man in the case was on
another and in hot pursuit. Just be-
fore his ship sailed he wired friend;
Just say I'm game. They can't lose
me. I shall always be Johnny-on- the
Spot" There can't be much doubt
that lad of such spirit will win the
maid of his choice.
The Savannah morning news., 1901-10-22
The Weather.

The indications for Georgia to-day
are for fair weather. light variable
winds, and for Eastern Florida, gen.
orally fair weather, except showers on
southeast coast. fresh northeasterly
winds, becoming brisk on the southeast
coast
The Savannah morning news., 1901-10-22
For Women.

DR.. Emmons' Monthly Regulator has brought
happiness to hundreds of anxious women
will so quickly and safely do the work. Longest
and most Estimate irregularities from anycsa:s
relieved at once. Success guaranteed Msny
stage. No pain, danger, or interference With
work. Have relieved hundreds of cases where
others have failed. The most difficult cases
successfully treated by mail, and beneficial
results guaranteed in every instance. Eorisk
whatever. We treat hundreds of ladies whom
wenever see. Write for valuable particularsand
free confidential advice. All letters truthfully
answered. Remember, this remedy is absolutely
safe under every possible condition and posi-.
lively leaves no after i'll effect upon the health.
By mail, securely sealed, $500. All money
letters should be registered, Address, DR..
j. w. EMMONS CO., 10 fremont St., Boston
The Savannah morning news., 1901-10-22

"A Difficulty Obyiated-Mr. r. Total
er-My dear, I do not think IL Is very
appropriate for you 20 wear that wine
colored silk 20 the W. q. r. u. conyen
ton
Mrs. T. Totaler-Oh. but n Is watered
SILK, you know. Baltimore American
The Savannah morning news., 1901-10-22
CURRENT COMMENT.

The Memphis Commercial Appeal
Dem) says: Southern white people
will not debate the question with Mr..
Roosevelt. Race equality cannot be
made the subject of academic discus
sion in the South. Things must remain
just as they are; will remain as they
are. and no human effort can change
the present order. AS well ask the
Southern white man to destroy the
sanctity of his own home, to permit
the despoiler TO enter ii as to ask him
to tolerate a condition of social equal
ity that Mr.. Roosevelt by his act
stamps with his approval"
The Philadelphia Ledger (Rep.) says:
commissioner Kasson, whose bust
ness 1t is to negotiate reciprocity
treaties, still declines, as he did last
winter, TO accept his salary, on the
ground that. since the senate refused
to confirm his treaties, he is not en-
titled 10 payment If the terms of Mr..
Kassons engagement included a guar
antee of senatorial action, his position
is we'll taken If not. he presents a
wholly unique example of an over con-
scientious public official"
The Baltimore Sun CDem) says
Nearly everybody now sees that the
trust mania OF year ago was yeri-
table craze. the bad effects Of which
have not yet been realized. Money, II
now appears. was borrowed from Eu.
rope in the furious haste OF our fnan-
ciers' and the repayment OF these Dor
rowings has helped 10 prevent the long
expected importation Of gold" D.,
The Savannah morning news., 1901-10-22
Southern Pacific Co.
Union Pacific Co.
OREGON SHORT LINE.

To all points in Texas. Indian ana
Oklahoma Territories, Kansas, Ne
braska, Wyoming, Colorado and all
points west of the Rocky Mountains,
also Mexico and trans-Pacific points
by fastest trains and steamers. Un.
surpassed accommodations at loWes1
rates. For further particulars address
j. j. Atkinson, travelling freight ana
passenger agent, IS East Bryan street.
Ga.
Send 10 cents in stamps for copy 30
Pa. Rice Book. containing 200 receipts
The Savannah morning news., 1901-10-22

IF YOU WANT GOOD NAIAi'',1
and work. order your lthosrSPh' -.
printed stationery and blank D''A'
Morning News, eaysnnah, 90
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20
FARMvLLE FAIR FOR NEW CENTURY, OCTOBER e. 25 1901
CITY DIRECTORY.

..,nE-M. Il. iluNlNN'
49, GorNCII-By Committees.
iv".ore-W r. Davidson, W. u. Gillian
80 ii.-,ence-H. r. Wall. J.. b. Farrar and
4. = NV. NV p. Anderson, A. e. Cralle
.r5J. farraf; ,.,,,.. T. .-.,,...,
3. I. i,.-bi~E rE l. Morris, W. f. Davidson and
J. i.in.aai-j. - k. Martin, r. l.. Morris and W.
k.A',es--,1e.~w. p. Gillian, r. L. Erambert
- r. lrallt.
ils aSss-H. r. Wall, r. l.. Erambert and W.
p fg.-. g.,- aouse-E. L. Erambert, A. +. Cralle
~ NJ. =. Anderson.
ia.'-son and J r. Martin.
u J.. kramhert A. r. Cralie and j..
x hdis@i'a.r~A. r. Crane. r. L. Erambert and
J, l,Sa,-se-I. q ~ b. Farrar. r L. Morris and W. p.
u.--.,,rr cierk-E. }. Whitehead.
NV Treasurer-S. ". Paulett Jr.
SS..-,nissioner OF Revenue-Herberi Rice.
s-fr Sergeant-R. ID. Miller.
n-fiee-I leslie FOCUS and J. r. Lyon.
se-.f Electric Plant-O. I. Wicker.
Tr.sf Sire uepariment-G. NJ. Robson.
s--aaf CommisSiOner-J. :. Hart
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20

Dear Nirs.-Ab bout year ago. having
arranged 20 20 on "a hunting frip. I found
myself unable 10 raise my arm. having au
attack OF rheumatism. went into your store
ana asked II you could help me out. as did
not want 10 be- disappointed. You sold me "A
bottle OF your "DlAle Nerve and Bone iini-
ment which used freely, rubbing yigur-
Ously with 10 that night. and J was most
agreeabiy surprised, when getting up the
next morning, 10 md the rheumatism en-.
irely cured and my arm perfectly well. !
am glad 10 say / have Lad no return OF
rheumatism since
told the above TO "a friend suffering the
same way, and he tried your "Dlxic Nerve
and Bone LinimentH and was as spe dilN
cured. Very truly.
j. THOMPSON BROWN.
Large bottle % cents, small bottle - cents
az Winston Drug Co.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20
Nigornns Rnhhinr

WITH Dixie Nerve and Bone Linlment " .
cure Rheumatism, sun joints Muscles a.
Leaders, Pain in the Back. shoulders an
slices. Dixie Nerve and Bone linImcnt :
the best Family Liniment known. For sak
by Winston Drug to
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20

Cure guaranteed Of the wora case by
taking four 10 sixteen bottles Of b. Is.
b. Botanic Blood Balml. Have you
tches in bones or joints. ulcers, erup-
tlons, scrofula, sore mouth, mucous
bl0tches, rhumaii-m, offensive catarrh,
falling hair, fostering eating sores, can
Ger, c0pper-colored spots Then B. b
B. will heal every sore, make the blood
pure and rich, and stop every ache b.
b. b. tested thirty years aud cures
especially the deep-seated old cases.
Druggists 81 Trial treatment free by
writing Blood Balm Company. Atlanta,
Ga Medical advice given free by ex-
perts on blood poison Write today for
advice and trial treatment.
Never pay vain old man the respect
due his age. Chah him, aud he'll feel
NpfIru
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20

Take Laxative Bromo Quiuine Tab
lets. All druggists refund the none
II II fails TO cure. L W Groves sigma
ture j. on each box 35c
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20

Ifthat mirror of yours shows q wreiched
sallow complexion, a jaundiccd look.
moth patches ond bloiches on the skin.
it's liver trouble; but DR. Kings New
Life Pills regulate the liver. purify the
blood. give clear skin. rosy cheeks. rich
complexion. Only 2jc al White & Co.
r. J. Garter, Of Prospect. drug store
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20

IN THE CLERKS OFFICE or THE CIR
L iCllI COURT OF the County Of Bucking-
ham, on the 2lst day OF August, 1901:
Robert Gillian, ...-....- Plaintln,
against
David Johnson, Defendant.
Is CHANCEKY.
The object OF this suit j. 10 set aside and
annul the deed from Robert Gillian 10 Da-
Nid Johnson for fraud and want Of consider
alton, dated on the 2n6 day Of MAY 1900. 10 a
tract OF land ia Buckingham County. con-
tanning 90 acres. which said deed is OF record
IN Deed Book 10. page 555, Of the County
Court Clerks Office OF Buckingham county.
And an affidavit having been made and
filed that the defendant, David Johnson, Is
not "a resident OF the State Of Virginia. IL is
ordered that he do appear here within fifteen
days after due publication hereof and do
what may be necessary 10 protect his inter
est iD this suit And 10 is further ordered
that "a copy hereof be published once week
for four successive weeks in the Farmviile
Herald, and that copy be posted at the
mont door OF the Courthouse Of this county
on the first day of the next term OF the
County Court
A cOpy-Teste;
T.. A. FORBES. Clerk.
Wm. Lancaster. p. @. sept. 6-st.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20
Stops the Congh

Laxative Bromo-QuiniueTabl cnre
a cold in one day. No Cure, no Pay.
Price . cents.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20

Some wives find il easier 10 patch up
d quarrel than 10 darn socks.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20

lt's good plan to put of tin fomor-
row the clothes that are too heavy To-
day.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20

All sadievillo. Ky. was curious TO
learn the cause Of the vast improvement
in the health Of Mrs : p. Whitaker.
who bad for a long time endured untold
suffering from a chronic bronchial iron
ble Its an due 20 Dr.. Kings New
Difcovery. writes her husband. 1T
completely cured Der and also cured our
little grand daughter OF severe attack
of " Nhooping Cough II positively
cures Coughs. Colds. Ia Grippe. Bron.
ohiiis. al Throat and Lung troubles
Guaranteed bottles soc and 81 LOO Trial
bottles free al White x Co r. J. Carter.
of Prospect. drug store.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20

Nell--"She's fliehty sort Of girl.n
Bell-"le-, the fellows say she,
bird
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20
6 @MN,pr

This signature is on every box OF the genuine
Laxative BrOmO=Quinine Tablets
the remedy that cures cold In one day
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20

Watermelons are calculated To make
ne feel seedy.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20
Hampden-Sidney College,

The l26ih session viii open on WEDNE~-
DAY. SEPTEMBER llth. 1901.
For catalogues apply 10
Prof n. G. BROCK.
Clerk Of Faculty. Hamp pden-Sidney, Va.
luue Zl-jm.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20
DISSOLUTION NOTICE.

Notice is hereby given that the firm OF
r. l.. NORRIS & CO.. composed OF r. l.. Nor
ris and J. NJ. Nenahle is dissolved nom this
date hy mutual consent
The business Will he in future conducted
hy +. L. Morris under the firm name OF
=. l.. MORRIS & Co.
r. J.. MORRIS.
J. NJ NENABLk.
Farmville. Va. Aug - 0l. ~
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20

permanently with I. Dayid's Liver Pills
] hey cure Constipation, Rillousncss. indi-
lestiOn and an Stomach and Liver Troubles.
J hey act mild. pleasant and efficient. For
sale by Winston Drug Co.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20

Lots Of fellows who can read a menu
in French haven't the price.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20

Fencing in hot weather j. apt TO
make people feint.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-09-20

The trustees are proud OF the record OF this
school in the past, and desire 10 develop Ii
still more. 10 is continued in all grades for
the fun session Of months.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1901-12-14

Man Said 10 Have Been Exposed. Locked lin a
Box Car

There was great excitement among
the men employed at construction
work on the 9, M ST. r railroad the
other day over the report that one Of
their number had been exposed to small
pox The fellow was a newcommer
and gave il out in some way that the
lumber camp in which be had been at
work contained some men infected
with small pox The word was passed
around. little being added TO IL by
each until it was reported that the fell
low was coming down with the disease.
A stampede was brought about We'd
nesday morning when the men started
in a body TO find the doctor. The fell
low was Stunned as If he were a leper.
The Doctor investigated the affair and
while he did not think the case such
rs required stringent measures yet he
thought best 10 accede TO the request
Of the men and quarantine the fellow
So he ordered him shut mp and in the
absence Of pest house the best that
could be done for the fellow was TO
shut him up in box car. This quieted
the men and they went back TO wrok
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1901-12-14
Treasurer Mansfield town5hip.

The carpenters are getting things in
shape at the new shaft as fast as pos
sible so that work there may be started
as soon as possible 1t is hoped that
work may be started before the begin
ming of the new year
Rumor has it that S. q. Chacbourne
is expecting soon to become father
in-law. No name is intentionally in con-
nection with this choice piece of gos-
sip SO it's mp to "Chad to explain.
Mrs. Cora Lamping travelling in The
interest Of the orphans home, at 81.
Joseph, Mich, collected neat sum
FOR the good cause from The. mining
companys employees.
Thos Mellon is the proud possessor
81 a new cutter that is daisy It Is
needless to say that Tom is so swelled
up over it that you can't touch him
with forty foot pole,
Mrs Pearl Henry -Rothie is making
extensive preparations for Christmas
tree at the school house A neat
special program is being arranged for
the occasion.
Fred Roberts mining engineer for
the Oliver Iron Mining company, did
some necessary surveying underground
last week
A very enjoyable social was given
Thursday night by the Ladies Aid
society at the home 81 Mrs Thos
Richards
The Oliver Iron INNINGS company s
team from tho Riverton mine, at Iron
River brought over load Of pipe
last week.
A set Of skip dumps for the Gibson
mine at Amasa, has just been com
pleted and shipped from the Mansfield.
John Mcleod received a fine cutter
from the Marshall Wells hardware com
pany, of Dnluth, this week
Capt. r. c. Menhennett IL still I'M
bale to. get around ON. account Of th'
recent injury TO his knee.
The G. & n. W. surveyors were out
Tuesday stalking out the line to tn,
new shaft.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1901-12-14
EMPEROR AND MONKS.
Beginning 81 the Friendrhip OF
Kaiser wilhelm for the
order OF Bcnedictines.

The friendship OF the German en-
peror for the benedictine order dates
from the year 1893, when his majesty
was present at the wedding OF his
cousin, Princess Marie OF Edinburgh.
10 the crown prince of Roumania. at
Sigmnringen. The archabbot OF the
German Benedictincs preached the
nuptial sermon, which SO pleased the
emperor that he invited the abbot to
sit next him at the subsequent ban
quet, and took him at once into the
high favor in which he and his order
have basked ever since, says a London
paper.
Not only have the Benedictine
monks been allowed TO return Go their
Rhineland abbey at Marialaach,
whence they we're driven many years
ago, but the splendid Romancsque
church Zone OF the finest in Germany
which, during a temporary occupa-
ton Of the monastery by the Jesuits.
had been kept jealousy shut up by the
government, has been restored to rs
former owners. The kaiser has erect
ed in this church ~ his own expense.
new and magnificent high altar OF
marble, and he crowned his fayors by
Offering 20 ennoblc the abbot by Civ
ing him the prefix Of won" This was
declined with thanks, whereupon tho
abbot received from his majesty Che
present Of q costly ring.
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1901-12-14
PLAYED For HIGH STAKES.
stin Poker Game Tint wns Played
on Train between west
ern Mine Mngnates.

Joe" Cooper, an old western min
ing man. was in a party at Delnou..
cos, where they were talking about
n recent pretty stiff poker game on
transatlantic liner. This prompted
Mr.. Cooper 60 say:
THE funniest poker game ! ever
saw was between the late Senator
Tabor of Denver, mining promoter
OF the name OF Fields, and stran-
ger to both, that was played on
snow-bound railroad train near Dill
lon, Col, i'm the winter OF 1890
"We four were the only passengers
in the only sleeper on the train.
Fields proposed poker. stayed out.
Tabor had two bars of gold worth
perhaps $4,000 apiece, which he was
bringing up from one OF his, at that
time, producing mines. Fields had
check book, and the stranger had
some currency. The game began with
one OF the $4,000 gold bars as buck
IL lasted II hours. Tabor had $i1,UOo
worth OF Fields checks besides his
own gold bars, and the stranger was
Just four dollars loser when the gama
ended.
"For taking good care Of the play
ers," continued Mr. Cooper, according
to the New York Times. "the porter
received $50. They had only two
decks OF cards on the train, and
now have one OF them"
The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1901-12-14
THIS is A FREAK FLOWER
ia Hiooms Only Occasionally, Rns itu.
mediateiy After Having Bcen
Placed in Water.

One of the most singular freaks in
the floral kingdom has recently been
brought to this country. 1t is called
an Occasional flower, for the reason
that it has no fixed time to bloom.
No mention is made in botanical Sci
ence Of the existence OF this marvellous
flower, says the Washington Times.
1t Il q mystery ali present that Is Well
worth clearing up. When in closed
condition the occasional flower is in
color and in form something like ma
ture and dried poppyhead cut withits
stem 10 IL. Submerged in a bowl OF
water for n few minutes and then
taken out and placed by its stem IN an
empty bottle, the outer petals begin,
after several minutes, to open out.
This process Is slow but distinctly
noticeable The petals continue TO
rise and to expand until they gradually
recede. When this action is complete
IL resembles in appearance the starry
sunflower, but as regards the shape
only.
The occasional flower remains thus
open for about two hours, during
which time, the state of humidity less
ening by degrees hc fbers begin TO
shrink and the petals close up grad
ually in the same way as they opened,
until the flower resumes its former po-
sition; but by The same simple process
Il can be made 20 unfold and 20 close
mp again and again ad lib. II IS also
asserted that. prorcrly nursed with
regard ~ temperature and air and
carefully handled, the occasional flow
err never decays nor degenerates in its
efreet 80 radiance and sniandor