Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-08-25
ETIQUETTE FOR
ALL OCCASIONS.
Continued From Sixth Page.

form" The one expression IS as open
to the reproach OF being slang as the
other.
Our own social code is patterned
largely after the usages in favor among
the English upper classes, although
there are occasions upon Which We are
a law unto ourselves. The Mother
isle sets us the example, but, having
reached our maturity, we, in common
with other grown up children. assume
| the direction OF our conduct when We
please.
Daniel Webster said, after a visit to
J England: The rule Of politeness there
f Is TO be quiet, act naturally, take no
airs, and make no hustle. This perfect
I breeding has cott great deal Of drlll.
+ We have among ouFselve. a large
| class of quiet ladies and gentlemen,
with mind. broadened by trayei and az
| ISOLATION with cultured people. with
/ Inherited traditions Of good breeding
and well Yersed in the social ethics Of
the older civilizations. To them We
may defer, to them safely look for d.
rection.
1t is only the chimney-corner philos-
opher who scorns and sneers at learn
ing the rules Of etiquette.
In che chanseful conditions of our so
ciety. where, untramne,led by class re-
striction all may mae their way y
/ eminence, there is need of guidance III
matters social, and fortunately a uni
versal recognition of their Importance.
Many, all over the country, are asking
for direction and for definite laws OF
conduct 10 be observed, according 10 the
most recent DEGREES OF fashion.
There is nothing derogatory to us
that we are not all conversant with the
latest forms Of conyentionality. Our
society is in evolution, but the anxiety
to learn, the often painful dread OF
making mistake, is reassuring. they
are growing pains.
Bonaparte took lessons Of the great
actor Ialma. how to eomport himself in
his new dignity and had his court
drilled in etiquette as he did his army
in military tactics.
When the great Catherine of Russia
gave receptions to her nobility, she was
obliged to publish certain rules of CON
duct that would be unnecessary now
with the most untaught peasant. Gen
tlemen were not to get drunk before
the feast was ended; ladies' were en-
joined not to wipe their N ouths on the
table cloth; and noblemen were forbid
den to strike their wives In company.
The curiosity is still to be met with, in
books OF table talk, and the edict no
doubt vas needed
Formerly there was an etiquette Of
war. The Frenchmen at Fontenoy,
face to face with their English oppon-
ents, politely babe them FIRE first"
But these well hammered men oppressed
their peasants and in private broke all
the commandments OF courtesy which
we revere.
This discrepancy between form and
fact has brought discredit upon the sub
ject of polite obseryances in the minds
OF some who say, Give us truth before
al things" They say that they involve
degree of dissimqlaton that often i'm
plicates us in positive hypocrisy. in I'M
equivocal falsehood that none should
justify. They ask. why palliats uns
truths because they seem kind of So
cial obligation?"
This is a question for social casuists
to decide. No thinking person would
undervalue truth, but, like all good
things 1t may be carried to excess.
very amiable woman once called
upon q friend with a newborn baby.
Isn't she pretty baby?" asked the
delighted mother. An affirmative an
swer was given, but the next day the
mother received a note saying: "On
reflection, have concluded that l was
not truthful when l said your baby
was pretty. lido not think her pretty
baby, but don't doubt that she Is a
good one, and hope may prove great
Joy to you
One cannot but feel that in this in
stance Truth was wounded in the house
of her friends. The deeper truth of
kindness and sympathy that for the
moment saw the baby through its mo-
theirs loving eyes was sacrificed to the
surface truth that appeared after cool
and unsympathetic reflection.
We are not justified, however, in de-
claring to a friend that we are bored
at an entertainment and are going
home, and in the next breath telling
our hostess that We are indebted to her
for very delightful evening.
Nor may we say to our friend, Don't
introduce me that that cad" and the
next minute while shaking his hand
repeat the formula, Happy to meet
you, unless one can say ii in such
level perfunctory tones that convention
atty owes nothing to cordialty and yet
is satisfied.
Politeness consists in depressing ILL
natured comments In the first pace,
not in asserting the contrary after
wards.
There are a few persons who are re-
bellious about some rules of etiquette
which seem useless for those of high
moral calibre; but as other laws are
made for the majority, so are those Of
social convention, especially for those
who are prone to transgress.
Under the head OF sueh FORMS coma
the rules of chaperonage. and most i'm
portant it is that all young men and
women should observe the formalitieS
ordained, in their intercourse with each
other, no matter how well-ftted they
may be in particular instances to take
care of themselves. One Is compelled
sometimes to make personal sacrifices
for the good Of the many.
OF course very few of the rules OF
good form are absolute and unchangea-
BILE, and they must be more or less reg
ulated by the standards of the people
one lives with, and the requirements of
the place in which one resides.
The old riddle asks, What Is the