davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

A few weeks ago some schoolboys in
the District of Columbia went out to
"play soldier" with toy guns. One of
the number carried a real GIN, which
his parents had been foolish enough to
give him. The youthful captain of the
company told him he need not go with
the party unless he would refrain from
loading the weapon. But he thought it
a great joke to load it on the sly, beliey-
ing that he would be sufficiently eau
tious in its use. Another boy, who sup
posed that the captains orders had
been respected, tried to be sly, too.
with the result that the gun went off.
A bullet passed through the jaw of an
Innocent member Of the party, who had
to be taken to the hospital, whre for
days his life hung in the balance. His
mother was at the time a nervous in
valid, and he was her only child Con-
sequently it was found necessary to
keep from her all knowledge of the sad
affair. Since this is a true story, its
repetition will be justified If its lessons
convey "still another warming"
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

Within a few months thirty-fve wo-
men have been brutally butchered by
men in this country. In each case the
slayer professed t0 be in love with the
slain and killed her because the feeling
was not reciprocated. In some cases
the girl had made known to her parents
that threats had been made against
her life and the man had been bound
over to keep the peace. But his bond
was no restraint and he killed her. This
erotic insanity is the most dangerous
form of homicidal mania. 1t is treated
lightly by the law or not at all. 1t
generally appears in persons of evil
temper and uncontrolled passions, who
are not desirable company for any self
respecting woman. 1t is becoming too
common, and in default of legal pro-
lection should be dealt with sternly by
the male protectors Of women. When
these erotics are arrested for making
threats their offense is treated all too
lightly. Often the matter is regarded
as a joke Any man who forces his
disagreeable attentions upon a woman
should be isolated and held either in a
prison or an asylum. In 80 per cent of
such cases the unreciprocated infatu-
ton ends In murder. Women are en-
titled to the most complete protection
against such brutes. The San Fran
cisco Call thinks that if the law will
not furnish it there Is no other way
than to kill the man who wooes a wo,
man by threat of murder. If she have
a male protector he should save her
life, for she is doomed unless he act.
If a woman yield to the threats of such
a man and marry him to save her life
she makes for herself lifetime of
misery, for such men are perverts, de-
generates or psychopaths unfit for the
conjugal association. We do not wish
to be misunderstood in these comments
We only say that it Is the duty Of a
father to save the life Of his daughter
or of a brother to save his sister. If he
arrive on the scene when such an erotiC
beast is executing his threat it is his
duty to kill the wretch, and the law
holds him blameless. In view of the
fact that such threats to kill are in
variably carried out, why is it not the
| duty of n father or brother to act in
advance of the opportunity which the
erotic assassin Is seeking.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
Handed Porter Rousseau sIanuscri,

Very queer tales sometimes attach to
the journeyings of manuscripts, and
the following is not without interest:
An elegantly dressed individual recent
ly dropped in at one of the Paris boul-
evard clubs, and handing a parcel to
the hall porter requested him to mind
the same for a little while. The Off
cial very naturally thought the parcel
was the property of a member, and at
once deposited it in his cupboard.
where it lay till day or two back.
when it was, with the sanction of the
President of the club, opened. 1t was
then found to contain a manuscript of
Jean Jacques Rousseau and copy of
lie Roman de la Rose" These were
duly examined by an expert, who re-
ported that the manuscript was Der
fectly genuine and worth at least 10. 600
francs, while the novel formed part OF
a very rare edition of which only a few
copies are extant. AS the elegantly
dressed gentleman did not reappear TO
claim the parcel, its contents were
handed over to the police authorities.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

The main battle for the cause of a
rational position on horseback for
women was fought when the bicycle
came into vogue. There was no way
to ride that vehicle except astride, and
even the most prudish have long since
gotten over the idea that there was
anything immodest or out of taste in
hicycle-riding for women. The unrea-
sonableness Of admitting cross-riding
on the wheel and forbidding it On the
horse has been too patent for even the
strait-laced people of Boston; hence the
collapse this year of all objection to il
In the Boston riding clubs.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
Too Late.

After hearing evidence in an assault
case between man and wife, in which
the wife had had deal of provocation,
the magistrate, turning to the husband,
remarked:
'My good man, 1 really cannot do
anything in this case.'
But she has cut a piece of my ear
off, sir''
"Well," said the magistrate, 81 will
bind her over to keep the peace"
you can't" shouted the husband;
''she's thrown it away."-London Tit
Bits.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
WILLIAM w. A

WILLIAM W. Aston Mr.. AStor rises at
II a. NJ, and soon takes a short stroll,
looking aimlessly into the shop Win
dows. He invariably lunches alone.
He insists upon always having the
same table and the same waiter. The
waiter must give his undivided atten-
ton to Aston, though customarily he
waits on four tables at the same time.
After lunch Mr. Astor sits reading
the English and American papers. He
goes to the barber at $50 p. M, re-
turns to the hotel, dresses and dimes
alone at different place every night.
Then he walks the boulevards, generally
entering q theater toward 10 o'clock.
He never stays more than Is minutes,
the French language having always re-
manned inaccessible to him. He sits
in the hotel bar till midnight, reading
the letters and kilograms which his Sec
rotary brings him only once day and
always at that hour.
Mr.. Astor detests cheese and when
he finds it on his table he gets into a
fury. The waiter, who resents the beg
carly 15-cent tip given by the million
aire, likes to provoke him and rarely
fails to carry the offending article to
the table. The other day when the
waiter tried his game he found Mr.. AS
tor ready, for, as he saw the cheese
approach, the millionaire seized a wa
ter carafe by the neck, saying: ''You
obstinate fool! If you put that nasty
stuff on this table I'll brain you. Take
it awayw
The waiter withdrew.
This style of life would hardly ap-
peal to a healthy minded American.
Evidently Mr.. Astor is not happier
abroad than he was before his expatri-
alton.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

The novel of many editions is no new
thing. Fifty years ago 1.-The Heir of
Redcliffe,' by the late Charlotte NJ
Yonge, went through twelve editions
in six months. and her novel, Daisy
CHAIN" was also very popular. More
notable than their success, however
was the disposal Of the proceeds. The
profits Of the one book were devoted
to fitting cut a missionary schooner
the Southern Cross, for the use of Bish
op Selwyn in New Zealand; and DAISY
Chain" erected missionary college in
Auckland.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
How London Could Be Defended

How London COulQ be De16nQeQ.
If the Dutch ever sail up the Thames
again, or Norman force land, London
will not be unprepared. In the archives
Of Pail Mall repose musty schemes for
the defense of the metropolis which it
was thought would be undisturbed I'M
til the War Department commenced to
move into its new palace. But there
are busy men about and as a result
new schemes will be Forthcoming for
the defense of London. Something
like sixty batteries of artillery will be
allotted for the defense, including guns
Of heavy caliber, At and inches,
which will be mounted in commanding
positions, covering a wide, sweeping
arc. The mobile force for defense will
include nearly 100 15-pounder field
guns, and an army corps of three di-
visions of regular infantry and 100000
volunteers.-London Express.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

larly until about two months ago, when
she became i'll, and could not do all the
work required Of her. The So week
went unpaid until it had grown to be a
debt of $25.
The mother wanted the child and
promised to pay the $50 in installments.
But Mrs. Brushard refused. She de-
clared she would keep the child till the
money was paid in full. Magistrate
Lemon was affected by the pitiful story
and advised the mother to get out a
habeas corpus writ for possession of
her little girl.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

boris to "sit until bedtime" This last
program did net include supper. but
simply a merry chat, with apples and
nuts, and all over by 10 o'clock. These
old-fashioned informalities in the visit
ing line were very Pleasant in their
time and made friendliness the fashion.
1t did not hurt a mite then to take a
friendly interest in 9our neighbors' well
fare, and it wouia not hurt now. But
somehow the cider the country gets
the weaker grows our ties of sociabil-
ity; we read our daily papers, watch
the markets, mind our affairs and don't
bother about the neighbors. The grange
and the farmers club bring a spice OF
sociability where the farmers are or
ganized, but will we ever get back to
the good old back-woodsy way Of let.
ting the farm and kitchen have a rest
while we dress up and go visiting?
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

castles, is said to
lead a lonely life.
The elite of British
society have C u t
him, and he is now
anxious to obtain q
seat in France to
which he may re-
tire when things
are not 6 o i n g
smoothly with him
across the channel.
A corr espondent
describing his life
in Paris says:
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

$50 you don't think the automobile
will succeed the horse for farm work 2"
asked the visitor.
Nope" answered Uncle Silas, "fnan-
cially they would be a failure. When
they'd get old an wore out how could
you turn 'em loose in field by the rail-
road SOS they'd get kilt? An even If
you could, doubt if the company 'ud
be held responsible" - Indianapolis
Sun
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
A Proud Record.

81 see that one of the newly appoint
ed patrolmen made an arrest within
twenty minutes after he assumed his
duties,' said the obseryant citizen to
the experienced policeman.
That's nothing" smiled the latter.
ST went to sleep while my commission
was being handed to me" Baltimore
American.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

The report from Pennsylvania that
young trades unionists are marrying
the young women whose labor was
brought into competition with their
own seems to be in keeping with the
tendency toward consolidation. Per-
haps this movement, started so mod
estly in the keystone State, may prove
the key to puzzling social and eco
nomic problem.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
Realized His own Madness.

''Now you are tired of me and abuse
me-" sobbed the young wife whose hus-
band refused to hire another maid to
take care Of her pet dog. Yet" she
continued, mot two years ago you were
just crazy to marry me-"
YES" answered the complacent man.
brute, my friends told me so at the
time, but l didn't realize it until after
we were married" -Kansas City Star.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
Can Always Fini Words

He-This author should be ashamed
of himself. A married man, too,
He-He says that mans wife
"gazed at him in speechless astonish-
ment." Why, such thing is unknown
in neutrality-suspicious..
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
The Rest ST 1t.

81 don't see why you aren't industri-
Gus and economical. ike the man next
door," said the wife. You viii scarce
ly have time to get to your office in sea-
son. The man next door has his lunch
in a basket and starts out at o'clock
in the morning"
Eyes; and goes fishing. "-Washing-
ton Star.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
Why He Broke Loose.

Mrs. Won Blumer-I thought you said
that Mrs. Peterby had such thorough
control over her husband that she
He wasn't there last Sunday.
Won Blumer-No. He found it was
affecting his golf.-Life.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

The story that the Gar jumps two
feet into the all every time anybody
strikes a match is officially denied.
The Cars bomb-proof room is also
string fiendoffski lieovitch. 1t does not
exist
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

A mother had a girl arrested for
making goo-goo eyes" at her son. If
mamma thinks the police can put a
shade over this kind Of an eye she is
laboring to mop back the Atlantic
Ocean. The gig. eye is here to stay.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
premises.

So we are to have new rifle which
is an improvement upon any arm in the
arsenal of nations. In the matter of
carnal weapons it is good policy to
get the best, for the best not infre-
quently keeps outsiders from kicking
up a disturbance. 1t is a case where
prevention is very much better than
0I1Tn
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

First Waiter-You see, the man gave
Peto a tip
Second Waiter-What! Before he
got anything to eat?
First Waiter-Yes-a tip that he
wouldn't get any if he didn't hurry
Puck.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

1t is too soon to tell whether the re-
duction in the size Of the page which
several metropolitan daily newspapers
are making is merely an advertising
experiment or the beginning of an i'm
portant permanent change. The daily
newspapers are much too large; they
absorb so much time as to leave little
for more serious reading.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

1t has remained for Chicago to dis
count the story about the theft Of red
hot stove. A couple of youthful burg
lars in that city got safely away with
q ferocious watch dog which had been
tiled loose" for the protection of the
OrQmiSQS
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

She-I see in New York every theater
program is required by law to bear
plan of the house Cd which the exits
are plainly marked.
He-Oh, is that what those things are
intended for? 1 always thought those
diagrams were dress patterns.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
A PhiIanthropist.

She (haughtily)-I happen to know
that you have already proposed to two
other girls this year.
He-Yes, dear, but 1 assure you it
was only out Of compassion.-Detroi
Free Press.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
The Sense of Ownership

There goes my trainw said the COM
muter with evaporation.
eff it's your train," said a sarcastic
bystander, ''why didn't you have it wait
for u?-Sommerville Journal.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
Women Workers of Britain

In proportion to its population, the
United Kingdom has a greater number
of women workers than any country,
and among them no fewer than &c.
600 are set down as dressmakers
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
Arithmetical backing.

Jimmy, Sammy says you had more
caramels than the rest of the children"
We'll, ma, 1 seen they wouldn't go
round again, an so jes' had to eat
em."-Detroit Free Press.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

A man who has had some experience
in Africa says that four men can hold
down a lion. One would not care to be
the party designated to hold down the
front end of the beast.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
A Definition.

Musician-I t'ink he's a true moosi-
cian-a true artist.
Friend-What do you mean by that?
Musician-Vell, a true artist is one
vot would love art for its own sake
If he could afford it.-Puck.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
Fly-POOr little things! Nothin
seems to grow up in this desert.


Agnes-In answer to the question:
How can l become beautiful in thirty
days" we would recommend that you
get pepper to sneak in on the right side
of the pork market.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

Jinrikshas have come to stay in Flor
ida. The fad down there is to pose in
one for the benefit of amateur and pro
fessional photographers.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
Chinese Rosaries.

Some Chinese rosaries are made of
wooden beads, with leather tassels, on
which are small brass rings, and are
finished at the ends with brass orna-
ments and tags of leather.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

A French physician declares that the
Chinese are very nervous people. 1t
is difficult to see how they could be
otherwise at present.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

A railway train made squirt Of nine
miles in six minutes. Aguinaldo's best
time is supposed to have been beaten
by it.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

When Mrs. Wallig
separated from her
husband last July
she arranged W | t b
h e r friend, NJ r s .
Mary Brushard, to
care for the child.
Mrs. Wallig agreed
to pay So a week.
She was able to meet
the payments regu-
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

"And they tell me colony hath been
planted in Delaware. Hast heard how
1t is prospering?'
''Marvelously! The first peach crop
hath been a glorious failurep'-San
Francisco Bulletin.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

"Don't you feel thrill of exultation
every time you see those symbolic let
tiers q. S. ~ asked the patriotic citizen,
who had just returned from Europe.
YES" answered Senator Sorghum.
"And 1 like 'em best in the shape Of a
monogram. They look almost exactly
like dollar mark" -Washington Star.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
The Situation.

eyes; Roberts is going home because
the war is over"
"And Kitchener
"Oh, he's going to stay because it
isn't"
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
Most Curious Thing.

Mrs. Quizzer (who wants to know
verything)-Now, what do you con-
slider to be the most curious thing you
ever saw, professor?
Prof. Trotter-A woman, madame
Harlem Life.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

We face a great many Of our troubles
bravely, because the real fact is that
we are so situated that we can't run
away.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
The Only Way.

''Bores can't bore me-"
"Why not?'
81 always manage to get the lead
away and bore them."-Puck.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
Many Use Tobacco.

1t is estimated one-third of the dwell.
lers upon earth are habitual users of
tobacco
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

Ted-He shutters so badly it took him
over half an hour to propose to her.
Ned-What did she say to him?
Ted-Oh, this is so sudden.-Judge.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
Child Held for Board.

Little 4-year-old Edna Wallig has
been in pawn in New York for $25
board, which her mother could not pay.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

When a boy puts on long pants, he
attracts more attention than he does
when he gets married.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

With a Reckless Persian Flavor.
"My guess concerning AN English
woman's Love Letters ought to attract
great attention"
"What is it?"
81 believe Omar Khayyam wrote
them."-Chicago Record-Herald.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

sit is a great drawback to be getting
deaf"
Eyes, it is; people quit telling you Sc
crets." Chicago Record-Herald.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
He Knew Her.

eff you want to marry her, don't be
so abjectly devoted. You simply cheap
ell yourself in her eyes"
'Then she'll take me. Mary never
could resist bargain. The King.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

"Guess it's a sure go bout 'em goin'
ter auction off this ERE busted rail-
road"
"Why SOP"
"Well, by gum, 1 seed red flags along
the track in three or four places"
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
AN ExPATRIATED AMERICAN.

Life Led by William Waldorf Astor
Not an Ideal One.
William Waldorf Astor, the expatri-
ated American, who is now in France
looking over some Of its marketable
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

The rat gives it out to the plague
doctor that he simply refuses to come
out and be exterminated.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

A new device dispenses with the tele-
phone girl replying to call. 1t has
been tried, and answers very well.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

"He gets on a spree occasionally,
doesn't he?"
"Oh, yes, off and on"
s'More often on than off, suppose "
PHILADELPHIA Press.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

A brakeman refers to coffin as -
bone dish"
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
An Adjunct to Tears,

perhaps you can direct me-" she
said with pompous condescension to the
foorwalker. I've a crying need
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
SUPPOSE WE SMILE.
HUMOROUS PARAGRAPHS FROM
THE COMIC PAPERS.

Pleasant Incidents Occurring the
World Over-Sayingst that Are Cheer
full to Old or Young-Funny SeIec-
lions that Everybody Will Enjoy.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

Praising your rival may be gooE
Christianity but it's poor politics.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

No wonder England is sour over the
Boer war. Her sugar had to be taxed.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

81 want you to take me to st. Johns
Wood, CabbiG."
"All right, sir, but would you mind
getting in the other side so as the old
'orse don't see yer?"-Phil Mays An
nual.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
Pie.

Pie that melts in your mouth is as
tonishingly obdurate after it gets into
your stomach.-Detroit Journal.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

Most girls can play the piano just
enough to spoil them for Homework.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
Wanted Specifications.

The farmer wearing long BOOTS
Hey, sonny, d'yew want tew shine 'em
for a dime?
The Bootblack Cooking them over)-
How far up?-Brooklyn Life.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

Pepperhole Pete-Cayuse Charley is
gone at last; he tried ter throw the
through express off tn track an wuz
cut in two.
Lariat Luke-Waal, Cayuse made
good; he allus sed he'd never die with
his boots on.-Ohio State Journal.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

"Yes'm," interrupted the floor walker,
in his quick, nervous way, "han'k'chief
department, f1f' counter, mex aisle"
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
Art Cookery.

"What lovely brown biscuits she
makesw
Eyes; in colorature cooking she is
quite uneXcelled-Puck.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

New brooms sweep clean-and old
ones. too, If properly manipulated.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

Klawback?
Pettyville Postmaster-Nope!
Drummer-Good! The firm hasn't
fired me yet!-Puck.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27
Cause for Concentration.

TUT
Documentary mail for me-John H.
Holbrook argus. (Holbrook, Ariz.) 1900-1913, 1901-07-27

the payments regu-