The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1901-02-27

brush Jared upon his nice sense OF
order and regularity. At the end OF
four miles he was conscious of nothing
except that the roads were abomnably
muddy, that the tall weeds were wet,
and that he was tired and hungry and
wished he hadn't come.
1t was still mile to the farm which
was advertised to be sold. and he
longeG to turn back; but he recollccted
the Yacht his wife wanted to buy on
time payments, and the automobile she
had in view. and the thought drove
him forward-there was no chance to
retreat.
How dye, pardnerw said the farm
er. who found Jones vainly trying to
locate the front gate by the dim twi'
light.
rs this the place that is adrer'
1ised:" asked Jones, resting against the
fence almost exhausted.
Il ca'calate it is. Be you from tie
city:'
Il be-" said Jones, dropping into the
dialect of the place.
Then you'd better come to the
house, The whole family set about
making him at home. They took it for
granted that he had come to stay
awhile. They opened some new pre-
serves. and got out the softcst and
most yielding of feather beds.
After two days Jones was surfeitcu
with fresh air, wholesome food and
simple. unaffected country manners.
He inwardly rebelled against brown
sugar in his coffee, white butter, and
feather beds. and the only institution
he fully endorsed was the hard cider
barrel. He was shocked al their ig.
norance of steam plows and costly
fertilizers. About the only satisfac-
1ion he got was in telling the feats of
famous horse trainers he had seen.
The neighbors came in to listen with
open -mouthed astonishment. They put
Jones down as remarkable man, but
the next day the eldest and LATEST
horse on the farm ran away with him,
and made him the laughing stock Of
the neighborhood.
Jones was mad enough to go home,
but that day his wife wrote letter i'm
ploring him to come back, explaining
that the horrid man wouldn't sell the
Yacht or the automobile on time.
Jones answered with an enthusias-
tic prose poem on the delights Of farm
ing. Jones was a small man, and he
often found some discrimination nec-
essary in dealing with his strong
minded wife.
Every day brought its trials. The
farmer attempted to learn" him to
plow, but gave it up. Jones had fire.
Quently alluded to the rough-shod agri-
cdlturist as clod-hopper, but after he
had watched his instructor and then
tried furrow or two himself, he made
up his mind never to consider any
body awkward again.
That evening a letter from his Wife
announced the engagement OF the eld-
est daughter to their well-to-do grocer
of German extraction and further stat
ed that the other girl had a STEADY"
who was saving his money.
Jones congratulated himself on his
Things couldn't have turned out
better; I still have my old position as
bookkeeper, and reckon l needn't be
afraid that the girls beauX will look
down on me. But what about buying
the farm?"
He approached the owner while sur
rounded by his numerous family.
You've got the best farm in the
State" he said, land you are very rca-
sonable in everything. You don't claim
it's the Garden Of Eden, but you ought
10. You've got the homestead shaded
by q spreading elm and the duck pond
near by-everything is as complete as
Il chrome. I'd like to buy you out. but
the fact is l haven't got the money
why. we amt no notion of selling
misterw. said the farmer in an injured
tone.
I'm glad of it, sir; but what about
your advertisements"
"Pshaw! VIC cply advertised FOR fall
boarders.'
u see," said Jones, with sigh OF re-
lief. L must have stumbled On the
wrong farm, but I'm blamed well sat
isfed. What's your bill?'
.lIXron bo;p, tho p,1nnu of I'M vO1,r
patent feathers, we'll call it four DOL
lars if you're willing"
"Whatever you say" said Jones,
counting out the money quite eagerly.
I've got a hundred dollars, at least,
out of the deal"
Jones had a great deal to tell when
he reached his fiat that evening. The
two young men, who came right regu-
larly now, greatly admired the speci-
mems of mammoth fruit he had
brought home.
You seem to have entirely regaincd
your good humor," said his wife, pick
ing the last burr off his coat tails.
The country is the only place for
change he said with sigh.
And what about buying the fcrm?"
his wife asked nervously.
Why, the fool farmer won't SELL
oh" she said simply. but the ez.
preston On her face showed she was
greatly Telicvcd.-Wuverley Magazine.
General Euller's Dis:incticr.
After the battle of Colenso. says