The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1901-06-27

~ charles visnsns E~bres.
TRINITY THIN is the literal trans.

IatiOu OF the name OF Mr. Iheo-
philus Jaggcr's cook. A tiny, spas
modic, jerky man, with face strained
into an habitual expression Of corded
anguish; n gait swift, convulsive. aud
q head full of schemes is the
American Theophilus. His history Is
q record Of wild theories worked out
20 the fizzling point. Born In New
Jersey. he went to japan to collect a
species of lichen. said to bc worth
millions In the English market. lie
collected carionds Of ". then learned
that nobody In England or anywhere
else ever bought u. After this III"
heart of Africa was gnawed at n
while by Jaggers. with reference tn
some idcn about ivory. They say he
took hold Of nm island awny down IN
the Antarctic regions. just this sid.
of the great wall OF Ice. in order Ia
grow queer native fruit like n
pumpkin down there, out Of which n
priceless perfume was going TO be dis
titled. He himself tells that the
pumpkins froze. and he brings one
with him. dried. as n curiosity, and
displays 10 with nervous pomp. He
hurtled about Mexico for n few weeks,
seeking u location. Then he came IN
Cuernavaca with some theory about
boiling sugar out Of sweet potatoes:
and there is man around the cor
ner constructing vat for him and
smiling into II as he constructs.
~.
Tbeophilus fell into conversation with
an old American resident. "lt's
wisest to keep house In this country
was the latters advice. "lIirc an In.
dim cook. but they're tricky. Now.
one thing they always do when they
want holiday: They tell you their
grandmother's dead"
.Jaggers smiled that awful smile ~.
his. and said he'd ''fix EN-" and wen.
dashing away TO the train.
At Queretaro u man In the seat bc.
side him gave him further informa.
tion. "Ycs. 10 you're going into bust.
ness, just keep house. It's easier,
Now. ] had an old cook with one eye.
but, say. II you get n cook, he u little
careful. They're tricky. Now, one
favorite ruse IL to tell you their
grandmother's dead when they wan.
TO go Off."
"Confound their grandmothers'
ejacuInted Jnggers. briefly.
In Cuernavacn. .Iagyers wo,ildn':
stay NJ any hotel. lie could not sprnl,
Spanish. but that made no difference.
He could put his mouth mp AZ the ear
Of the addressed person aud roar
honrsely In English. "i;last EN-.
they're stupid" ragged he "SpaniS',
II the blnstedest language. anyhow"
The hot.lkeepcr acted ny interpreter.
and helped him 10 rem, n house. Then
he swung his legs over Jagger's bal
cony railing. IN the afternoon sun.
and said: ''Mr. Jnggers. you'li bc
comfortable here. just hire u cool;
and take II easy. Bui watch these
Indian servants. You'll find 'em
tricky. Now one favorite scheme &c
Hold on" said Jnggrrs: lyon
mean the grandmother trick 80
did you know about it?"
"I'm on 10 that. I'd like 10 see en-,
work their grandmothers on on me. ''
swore Theophilus .Iaggers.
Jaggers bought two chairs. u hard
bed and some pottery. Then he hired
cook.
Trinidad Dcigado (Triniiy Thin
here enters. She looked like an Old
woman, hut Jaggers IL still p,zzIing
over that. Her face was keen. shrew,'.
sharp like steel tool. with fine old
thin-lippcd regal mouth. and eyes that
pierced. She was slender and bony.
Even In the stern. grand Aztec glare
Of her eyes WIS .ihing half wist-
fuI. hale humorous.
TheOphilus felt uneisiIy that hrr
sub-consciousn-ss WIS lnughing ~
him. ''Cnn you cook" roarrd he ~
her ear IN English.
Isl, senor." said she, not under
standing a word. folding her hands.
well. say" thundered he, bending
nearer and disioriing his anguish
ridden conntennnce, I'm on TO your
tricks. I'm not green. do you hear.
seemed r.,so,,,,,, a,,J ,nn
tbougb accidental "Xow Lnow ,h.
urandmo,b.r ,r,,L no,,, ,,,, .,.r g.
shaking his as, .cnm. wh;n;no
around me about your grnndmothcr's
being dead!"
d;,nifcJ manner ,ot .,.n ,nnJ.r,nn
what be WINS ,,,L,n. aho,,
J,ogers icno,,n, nr ,h. .o,,,r.
.oreed IN ,ay Ion ,,,n.s IA. r.a,,,,r
wages. sor s,. ,hrn,,oh a., go
rreter reo,o,t.J mi, s,,, ,,,,t,,
IL Thereafter snn,or,.d Tr;,i,aa 20
children two hnshanJs s",m. ,.r,
o,J ladies n.x, dnor a., ,,'. 49,,
sr..zer n, h.r LIZ, 49, ,,., ,,,.a'
inbarmonio,,s nigs who Ivs,, IN h.r
s'''"' "S'c"H P'k" ""o 'N''' w NV