Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1901-01-12
It Was Bridge Whist That Worked
All the Mischief.
]. MATRIMONIAL BLISS AND MRS.
The Latter Tells Something Of
Over Long Honeymoons.


ShreWdly guessed as much, when, In the
course Of the afternoon, Mrs. Honeymoon
dropped in. ostensibly to borrow the pat
tern of new circular f1ounced skirt; she
fingered to have a cup of tea, and in the
fullness of her heart spoke bitterly of the
prevailing unreliability and heartlessness
of masculine kind, and finally illustrated
her point of view by revealing her little
family skeleton, thinly disguised as the
property of a nameless young friend.
| And she has not forgiven him yet, this
maltreated little wife you speak Off" asked
Mrs. Bliss. placidly scattering French
knots on a blue taffeta front.
| NO, and she never. never will" asserted
Mrs. Honeymoon, Systematically, but with
a forlorn little gulp in her throat.
They hardly speak, suppose except be-
| fore the servant; she does not call him any
more by their favorite funny pet names, or
taste his coffee in the morning before send
ing 1t down the table to him, in order to
see 1t is just exactly right, or help him on
| with his overcoat, or tease him with foolish
tenderness to take good care of himself in
the dangerous down town, or run upstairs
| Just before dinner to make the bow in his
necktie, eh?" inquired the hostess.
Moo quavered poor Mrs. Honeymoon"
put you cannot understand the situation,
MRS Bliss, for your husband is different;
ne would not drive you to the verge Of de-
| SPAR and then come home and laugh at
your fears and and here Mrs. Honey
moons throat got sadly out of order.
| Dear girl laughed Mrs. Bliss comfort
aDiy, when you and your proud young
! married friend have turned the fifth mile
post on the matrimonial turnpike I
nave you will realize that a husband is
| not utterly wrecked by an evening off
now and then; that you can even piece out
a great deal of happiness afterward. and
that men have been behaving just like
your trends husband ever since poor dear
Mother Ewes time. She no doubt in her
| sheepskin piegnoir sat far into the wee
| sma hours by the tent flap waiting to put
| the screws on poor dear Father Adam
who had stopped out a little overtime to
amuse himself with a few old cronies at
some tempting prehistoric club.
"Of course. [ know just how your friend
felt, because l had one who went through
the same experience. Chronologically
| speaking her honeymoon was over. but she
| had liked 1t so much she begun q second
series, resented callers In the evening, read
| deep, deep books to her dear boy, began to
| brush up her French verbs with him and
| fel. as sure of him Mary did of her little
| lamb She never considered that even
! honeymoon. when kept over too long. will
| ferment just as other sweet things do.
and that all this intellectual development
and communion of soul was just trife
hard on her man. who had been moilng
and toilng in the office all day and needed
cheerful diversion in the evening.
| We'll. to make a long story short. the
natural consequences of the very unnatural
methods she pursued came promptly about.
One early spring evening the fritters he
loved best and the kidney stew he had
often praised stood smoking the table,
but the head of the house, oh. where was
he? Let us draw a veil partially over the
| suferings of that well-meaning young wife.
She kept a stir upper lip before the SER
| wants and ate about much dinner as
| would maintain humming bird in robust
health. and then she went and sat by the
front parlor window and watched. She
rang up the office early in the evening, but
he had left there some time before, called
hl1rg 1nrly t.lI
half-past 10 o'clock, when no telegram or
messenger boy had come. and the SER
| wants had all gone to bed and she had
wept two of her best large satn-covered
down pillows into state of disuse, all my
friend desired was the privilege Of doing
proper honor to her dear boys remains.
She knew he was dead and at IL o'clock
she rose up in cold despair and went out
| bareheaded into the street to alarm her
nearest neighbor and enlist his services
in gathering up the sacred bones of her
husband.
LAS it happened her nearest neighbor,
who was an acquaintance, was the genial
bachelor who had given her husband away
at the altar. AS she battered down the
street, drizzling heavily into her handker-
chief at every step. she saw that the
bachelors windows on the second floor of
the apartment house were open and iilum-
mated and there, sitting shamelessly with
his profile to the outer darkness. was her
husband! Enthusiastically he held good
bridge whist hand for his expression was
cheerful, and four other men were sharing
the game.
I'm an instant the broken hearted widow
became goddess of wrath, and she stalk
ed back home revolving some very telling
remarks suitable for launching at the cul-
prit's head. as soon he should awaken to
a sense Of his home duties. She did think
out as fine line of reproaches the in
jured feelings Of a young wife can invent.
Every reproach was guaranteed to leave a
sharp little sting, too, when the church
clock rang the half hour and up the silent
street she heard a familiar step and A
cheerful low whistlng.
Then il flashed upon her that not since
she had inaugurated the second honeymoon
had his step seemed so light or his whistle
so gay, and, with the delightful inconsist-
ency and uncertainty of action and devo-
ton that is the precious privilege Of our
sex. she fell upon his bosom and reproach-
ed herself
Yes. Mrs. Honeymoon. that is just what
she did, and 1t was a stroke of genius. Shs
assured him with tears that she was all to
blame. She had made his home dull, his
evenings long, excluded his friends and
pastimes, and in consequence she wanted
to die begging his forgiveness. Not ali
the righteous denunciations and bitter ac.
cusations she had thought out at first
touched melted and conquered him like
this
1.-The poor dear man was remorseful
that he heaped every species of abuse upon
himself. His ignomny, however, was COM
plete. when in trying to explain, he put his
gram he had forgotten to send her
| He looked rather overcome when she
said at any rate the telegram showed his
thoughts had been in the right direction
and that she would like to read 1t. He
handed it over and she read. Don't wait
dinner. awfully sorry, Jones' famous trot-
ter has stone in foot, promised to help him
get 1t out. Explain later, probably save
| Jones thousands"
Mrs. Honeymoon laughed shakily land
she didn't grow angry at that"
''She laughed answered Mrs. Bliss, land
he called her an angel and the next day
some Of the thousands that he failed to
save for poor Jones went into particular
ly pretty brooch for the tactful wife, and
ever since that time the deep. deep books
have accumulated dust on my friends top
shelf: French verbs lie unconjugated, and
not only has that house become an emf
nently cheerful friendly home, but that
deep, deep wife has learned herself to play
whist in all styles.
Now and then at long intervals her hus-
band says, when he puts on his overcoat
after dinner. I am going to take a stone
out of the foot of Jones' horse and perhaps
| shall be a little late. dear, don't wait up,
and the joke Is considered just as good as
ever"
? $50 you think my friend ought to for
give" meekly asked Mrs. Honeymoon, fas-
r tAv,f has fsar hn,