Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-02-02

doors of the Sunday school part OF
the church opened and several women
marched up towards the pulpit. At the
same time some doods walked UP an.
other lie towards the pulpit an met
the women in front of the minister.
Last of all came the bride and groom.
There was fellow who stood by the
groom and acted as overseer. The re-
porter told me he did not know his
name, but that he was the best man.
Sez 1, o! yes, Gus Rubin, an he lated.
The minister did his work accordin'
to book form. 1t was short and seemed
to be satisfactory. Then the music
started and they marched to the par
lors Of the church and the crowd
followed, the long tailed fellows goin'
first. / didn't go but the reporter told
me that the folks went to congratu-
late the young couple, which was
proper. He said some of the rich old
fellows with homely wives would kiss
the bride, if they got chance, and
that the women would kiss her an
tell her how sweet she looked, and
how nice her dress looked and so
4th, and then they would go behind
her back and say her neck was
scrawny, that she had pimples and
freckles, and worst of all, that her
dress did not fit abit. Stitch high
pochraphy?
was SO disgusted with the whole
performance that / did not go back
to sister James ut all. jest went to
the depot and came right home, and
the next morning the papers mentioned
me as one Of the out of town guests,
which was correct.
allus vowed that would never get
married but I'm goln to spruce up a
bit an do it. I'll show sister Jane what
real weddin's like. No one but the
kin will be invited. There won't be
no ribbons and flowers and red tape
an doods. Wen just stand up IN the
minister will do the business in about
minute. Then Wen have some fried
chicken, cold ham, baked beans
pumpkin pie--no weddin's complete
without pumpkin pie-gingcr snaps an
coffee for supper an that will settle
it. The neighbors will come along
about ten o'clock with horse tiddles
old wash boilers, tin horns an COW
bells an raise the dingdest noise yol
| ever heard If that dood thct married
our niece comes he'll be scared stiifcr'l
Il boiled shirt Then we'll invite 'en
all in and give them Il good feed nj
pass round the hard cider to max
'em lively. I'll tune up the old tiddl
while the rest carry out the kitche
stove and pile the chairs on the tabl
an then I'll cut loose on IL Virgin
reel. Choose your partner, let her sc
keep it up till daylight. You ca
have the first dance with my new wife
When you get hold of her you wi
have something to hold to. She's a
purity an plump as Il four year oil
colt and never wore corset in he
life.
She came over yesterday mornin
to have me send a hand over tC hel
her dad thresh. When she came in til
room loolSin so purity | felt the qucc
est feellns / ever felt. | couldn
hardly talk. Purity soon l sed do 70
member how you useto sit on my la
when you wus little girl. She men
bercd an blushed. Then we wus qui,
| for while. couldn't think of not
ing to say. Purity soon sed do
i iSuln. Cne DluSucu llOTc an scu 81
was too big an 1t would not be rit
Jest felt all over as If l was abo1
to bust. Then l sez let's get marie
an before l knowed what ! wus do
we wus all mixed up.
Well, Jake, | spose you will ST
I'm fool for written like this, ID
don't care durn what you say.
this Is bcin fool ! wish he'd been
fool sooner. IL bein happy is bein
fool I'm the biggest fool of Il fool
this hull county. jest dote on be
stitch fool.
| It's all fixed up an wen have Il
wcddn' jest rs soon as the pumpkin
are ripe enough to make pics. Coz
J but they grow slow. Was out to 10,
: at 'em twice today. When | go dow
) to the center to mail this letter L
5 goin to see If they don't have cann
5 pumpkin for pies. If they do YOU ci
) calculate on comm soon. I'll let Y,
know in time so you can get he
5 airly.