davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05
SOME INDIAN WAYS.
,..,,. If ohlsAeua Are Chiia-
like Bat Are Net At All
IAnoAest.

Judge Museller has been for several
months with the Wichita Indians in
southwest Oklahoma allotting lands
TO them. "If had It to do over again."
said the Judge to the Wichita (Kan.)
Ea gle, 81 would take my wife with me.
She was with me two weeks and found
that white women have remarkable
influence upon the Indian in the way
of inspiring confidence. In seeking to
make pictures found in almost every
instance that the squaws wou.d not
stand before the camera unless my
wife stood with them. have heard q
good deal about loose morals prevail
ing amone- Indians, but SO far as the
Wichitas are concerned they do not de-
serve the general reputation of their
race. They are not immodest. OF
course. ,h,y do things that white peo-
pie would rot do, but 1t is mostly be-
cause OF their childlike nature. The
women 80 bathing twice day inthe
liver. early in the morning ard rgain
later. tn, children are II n. water
all the during hot wea' y is
no uucc. IN thingearly ir II =. rn-
tng to sse q dozen sJuaws ;r, r. si-
Ient.y ,inyn to the river. thew of
their sheet-liks robes and lamp into
the river. Their solemn silence dur
ing the aquatic visits is some thing that
I am unable TO account for"
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05
A REFUGE FOR RoGUEs.
Perfect Paradise for Me. whs Have
ConnitteA Crimes of Every
Description.

There is one corner of central Amer
iea that is at present a perfect para
disc for men who have committed any
crime. 1t is q place where the out
casts of the worlds society rule the
land of their adoption, and where the
officials OF the government protect all
thieves that come to them and make
1t dangerous for any detective to me-
lest them, says the London EXPRESS.
This is the republic of Honduras,
one Of the least advanced of the states
of South or Central America. Hon
duras indeed is curious mixture of
jungle and gigantic forest. Of cocoa
and of rubber trees. of bugs, vampires,
snakes and crocodi!es-of all manner
Of things that creep and crawl and
sting and bite; q region where life in
the daytime is mockery and at night
one feels as though sleeping in red
pepper.
Here. in every hamlet and city. are
to be found men from different lands.
mostly outlaws from their own coun-
try. Chicago, Boston. New York and
Philadeiphia all furnish their quota.
England, France, Italy ard even for
away Russia have their share. They
make no, attempt at concealment,
bear the names they were born to
bear and go along about their own
business as IL the laws of their own
country had not made them outcasts.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05
THE IRELAND OF TODAY.
Its Nain Lack 10 in the Manu-
featuring Line.

Ri. Hon. James Bryce, a careful OBJ
server, and Mr.. Seumas MacMarus. the
Irish writer, agree that Ireland to-day
is enjoying comparative prosperity.
The people are living better, their food
is of higher grade, the bank deposits
have decreased, the farm rents are
lower, and the returns from work are
larger.. The main reason why it does
not take its place as one Of the rich
countries of the world is its lack of
manufacturing. ltexizts mainly on its
agriculture and its fisheries, says the
Phila de.phia Saturday Evening Post.
Ireland contains 32,337 square miles.
not including the 1876 little Islands
which aGd 246 square mile 5 to the total
It is not quite SO large Indiana. and
is n little larger than South, Carolina.
The Philippine islands are four times
the size of all Ireland. Less than five
years ago . commission appointed by
parliament reported that there had
been placed upon Ireland q taxation
burden which It was unable to bear,
and that something should be done.
Thus came the new land act, which was
. mitigation. but not reform, of the
evils.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05
A WORTHY SUCCESSOR.
"soMErHNo NEw UNDER THE SUM-


All doctors have tried to cure
CATARRH by the use Of powders,
acid gases, inhalers and drugs 10 paste
form. Their powders dry up the mus
cOus membranes causing them to crack
open and bleed. The powerful acids
used in the inhalers have entirely eaten
away the same membranes that their
makers have aimed to cure, while pastes
and ointments cannot reach the disease
An old and experienced practitioner
who has for many years made clos,
study and speciality Of the treatment Of
CATARRH, has last perfected a
Treatment which when faithfully used,
not only relieves at once, but perma-
nently cures CATARRli, by removing
the cause, stopping the discharges, and
curing all inflammation. 1t is the only
remedy known to science that actually
reaches the afflicted parts. This wond
erful remedy is known AS ''SN UFFLES
the GUARANTEED CATARRII
CURE" and Is sold at the extremely
low price Of One Dollar. each package
containing internal and external medis
cine sufficient for a full months treat
ment and everything necessary to its
perfect Use. -.. ., nod
''"SNUFFLES" is the only perfect
CATARRH CURE ever made aud is
now recognized rs the only safe and
positive cure for that annoying and dis.
gushing disease. 1t cures all infsmma-
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

There is story illustrative of Jap
anese oficeholding. says Toxic corr
respondent in the New York Post. A
rich tourist who feared that his heavy
baggage would make trouble for him
with the customs laid five-yen note
conspicuously ON the top tray ofcne of
his trunks. The inspector paid 20 at
tention to IL, but went on che cking
the pieces as he examined them.
That's for you" the tourist explained.
Very gravely the little man put =
chalk mark on 1t and passed 1t back
TO its owner, who now says that no
one need tell him that the Japanese
haven't a sense of humor.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05
ENJOYED TIE FlcHr.
.Felly's" Comment 81 a. ensass-
Asnt between wilA Cats In
Clsse 0aaSteFs.

The two wildcats in boz In bag
yage-room at the Union depot had
glared at each other for . couple of
hours-tefore the trouble began. says
the Denver Republican. All the
afternoon they had growled. and the
supposition is that they had said
things to each other that were not
complimentary. The larger OF the
two had spilled the water belonging
to the smaller one. He had switched
his tail into the Others face, and in
various ways had given the young
ster to understand that there was
apt to be trouble. Toward evening
the two sat in opposite corners and
glarcd at each ether. The larger nm
ilnal about eight o'clock thought It
was about time to make the interior
OF the box interesting to one OF the
occupants. He was successful.
No sooner had the big cat attacked
the smaller one than the latter was
ready for business. There wns
mass of tangled fur inside the box.
the sides of which groancd with the
struggle. Growls and flying fur came
out from between the cracks. and
these who were looking on could not
tell which was the winner. Several
of the bageagemen caught up sticks
and through the Sits in the box suc-
ccodcd finally in roking the beasts
into submission. AS the two Wild
cats covered down in opposite cor
ners South African parrot swing
ing in cage near by called out:
"Let 'cm fight! It's peach!"
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05
: PUMPING OUT A scow.
II u the Easiest Problem the River
Uon Has-Just Fall the PlaS
Oat anA Haol.

.Nobody who knows anything
about boats worries over . few feet
OF water in scow II the water isn't
too deep" said a river man to New
York Sun reporter. Getting 1t out
IL the easiest job in the world.
"scows, as everybody knows, are
dat bottomcd, and up forward in the
bottom of every one is a plug as big
around as mans two fists. Dozens
Of empty scows NIL up with water
and lie at the piers with only the
deck afoat every yeAr. II doesn't
hurt them. The owner just let's them
lie so till they're wanted. Then he
sends . tugboat alongside and she
bitches on A man goes aboard the
scow and pulls out the plug.
'Does the scow sink? Nary q
foot. As the tug starts her up You
see she FITS the old scow up some,
and the result is that the water in
the scow pours out through the plug
hole. It's hard pulling at first. but
the faster the tug hauls the higher
goes the scow bow and the quicker
the water goes out, till the scow's
almost dry. After . spin of mile
or so the plug can be replaced and
the little water that remains in her
pumped out by hand.
simple? should think so. Easi-
est thing in the world. That's why
scows are so useful. You needn't he
so extra particular about calking 'em
SO long as your cargo won't be hurt
by water; and age and submersion
seem to improve them"
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05
HAS AHARll1Ess AUfoxoBILE


b. H.,yarner, OF Washington. made
ratheE.l pecnlier and what might have
been 4 most Disastrous visit to big
sewer now in course Of construction
in the capital city. He recently. Pnr-
chased sslqoomobile to aid him fn in
vestigating diRerert .s&rtians s6f his
district. ~ -
One morning. says the Star, he-weot
out to pay his respects to Andrew
Gleeson, an old friend Of his, who Is
constructing the. big sewer referred
to. He was accompanied by his son.
They soon reached the banks Of the.
James Creek canal. As the road was
very narrow and said to be impas sable
4 little farther on. Mr.. Warner en-
deavared to effect = backward motion
on me part Of the horseless carriage.
and in so doing caught his sleeve in the
wrong valve, ard in an instant the We
hicle Sfsew- ike an, eagle over the big
wall b3rdssjngs4he james Creek canal
and PLUNGED Chr two occupants into
the air. hotI making somersnults. Mr..
Warner came down. In channel just
larre enbu9h IA hold him, which had
recently Ae6n dug through the mud to
carry az snffpee water. The locono-
bile tuehsd h. cdmplete somersnu't and
KNOCKED fhs 6GahboArd, side bars and
top risriag INTO 4 Thousand pieces.
The whole incident occupied only a
few seconds, and when Mr.. Warner re-
covered from: his surprise he found
himself under the locomobile, which
was tsrned bottom upward, with the
engine still In motion and tho wheels
revolving At 4 rapid rate. while his son.
who had landed on his, feet, was sur
"yins the situation with solicitude.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05
HOW AUTOS HELP TRAVEL.
A French Clus Nakes Cs.Aitie.s
Easy Ter Automobile 'Teusists
In Europe.

The Touring Club of France il not
an association exclusively for the
promotion of au.omobilism. says
Consul Thornweil Haynes, of Rouen.
Its functions are much more vast. and
every tourist on the continent is in
debted to this gigantic organization,
often without knowing 1t. for the
amelioration of the conditions Of
travelling. It's membership has In
creased to more than 10000. Its or
gan, the Revue de Touring Club de
France, is ont Of the most widely
read of French journals. Its head
quarters are at 10 Place de 10 Bourse,
Paris; fees. five francs ($D . year.
This club publishes each year an
annual giving all places of interest
on the continent. conditions and maps
Of oil roads, distances, hotels. laws
and regulat tons regarding tourists,
depots of petroleum. etc, and every
thing of advantage to the traveller.
An agreement has been reached by
the clubs of France. Belgium. Italy,
Switzerland and Luxembourg for the
exchange of privileges and courte-
sizes.
The headquarters Of the Touring
Club Of Belgium4is II Rue des Van
niers, Brussels; That of the Touring
Club Of Italy, 3 via Giulini, Milan;
that Of the Touring Club Of Switzer-
land, 4 Boulevard du Theatre, Geneva;
that Of the Touring Club Of Luxem-
borg, S Avenue de lArsenal. Luxem-
horD
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

ITS mean thing to DO said the
politician, but I've got to shake the
public confidence in this opponent OF
mine somehow"
"Eut there is no use of abusing
him."
NO. I'll awaken distrust by more
ins;diors methods. 1 will have him
called the sii~er-tongucd orator. If
that naI,c ever fastcns to him, his
finish is in sight. '--Wasi.ingto Star.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05
THE HOME GOLD CURE.
Az INGENIOUS TREATMENT II WHICH
pRUNKARDS AXE BEING CURED
,pA1LY III SPITE OF THEM
AELvEO.
no NONoUs DOSES. NO W1AK1Nlxo
or ru4 NBRvEs. 4 FhEAsANT
AED POSITIVE CURE FOB
TAH LIQUOR HAtlT.

II 10 nov, generally known and under
stood that drunkenness IL disease and
not weakoees. A body Oiled with poison,
and nerves completely shattered by
periodical OF constant use oe intoxicat-
ing liquors, requires an antidots capable
Of nsutsalising and erndicattnG this
boison. and destroying tho craving Tor
intoxicants. Sufferers may now cure
themselves at home without publicity
3lssa OF time from business by this
N1nderfal HOME GOLD CURE"
Q13ch has been perfected after MANY
HRs OF close study and Treatment OF
4aqbr3stes. The faithfdl use according
to directions OF this wonderful discovery
lis positively Ruarahteed 10 cure the
most obstinate case, 30 matter how
bard drinker. Our records show the
marvellous transformation OF thousands
OF Druhkards Into sober. Industrious
and upright men.
WIVES CURE .YOpR HUs.
BANDSl! CHILDREN CURE
YOUR FATHERS! This remedy 10
in no sense nostsnm but is specific
for this disease only. and is 30 sktllfully
devised and prepared that it is thorough
~ soluble and pleasant to tue taste, 30
that 1t can be given In cup Of tea or
coffee without the knowledge OF the
person taking 1t. Thousands OF Drunk
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

Good Thtn9 tof nss
Church, understand tbs jury stood
II to in favor Of acquittal at first?.
Gotham-That's right; we did.
well, how in the world did the IL
ever come around to think as the one
man?"
We'll, you see. the fellow who was
alone for conviction knew the prisoner
pretty well, and he told us that the fell
low had lot of interesting children.
and he was forever telling stories
about their marvellous sayings. SO We
thought it wouldn't hurt to lock him
up for . few weeks. - Yonkers
Statesman,
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05
Getting Even.

I'm going to get even." said the
Kansas husband.
What are you going to do?"
IF my wife is going to go into pol
itics and make speeches, I am going
to read the household hints and pub
lish recipes for angel cake."-Wash-
ington Star.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

JACKS father and mother were hav-
ing very heated discussion at the
table one day. They entirely forgot
him, and, ms the argument waxed
tiercer, he looked from one to The
other with real concern on his club
by face. Presently. during lull, he
cleared the air by asking, pointedly:
Papa, did you marry mamma, or
did mamma marry you?"-Brooklyn
Life.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

Here is a word worth committing to
memory, to be uttered severely when
YOU want to terrify one younger than
yourself into submission: "Suelpaar-
delooszonderspoorwegpetroolryting."
The meaning does not matter very
much, the sound being everything, but
1t may be as well 10 know that it is
Dutch for. 1.-THE observation-disclosures
ordinary-road-running-pe petroleum car
rage or motor car.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

II an very sorry, Marie. that your
mind il concerned always with such
trivial things! Yon seem to have NO
thought for anything better than .
new haiti"
"What's the use? II I wanted an en-.
tire costume You wouldn't buy It for
mei"-Heitere Welt
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

The Investigations on agricultural
soils which are being conducted in this
country are probably unsurpassed in
quality and extent by those of any
country, unless it be Russia, where a
very systematic and extensive line of
Investigations, including survey and
classification of the soils of the whole
country. has been in progress for a
number Of years. says the Popular Sci
ence Monthly. The work in this coun-
try has been carried on mainly by
number Of the agricultural expert
ment stations and the divisions of
soils of the national department of ag-
riculture. The report of the field OPP
erations Of the division Of soils for
1899, by Prof. Milton Whitney and
number of his assistants, lately Is
sued, is report of progress in survey
ing the soils Of the United States. Dur
ing the year areas aggregating about
100000 acres were studied in the field
and mapped.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

Uncle Georg--C.ars, If you are wise,
you Viii crap tina. young Srattergeod.
He's Il ST. ..dthrift ny instinct, and
you never can count upon his taking
care CT his money.
Ciara-Don't be alarmed, Uncle
George. If can keep the engagement
running fer another year he won't
have any money to take care of.--Bos-
ton Transcript.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05
While they Have Youth.

Miss Gotham-I understand young
May Breezy. of your city. is to be mar
ried this month. Do you girls in Chi
cago usually marry SO early?
Miss Jackson Parke-Oh, yes. The
earlier the oftcner, you know.-Phili-
delphia North American.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

Farmer Korntop-My Oldest boys
workin' in your town. His name's II.
J. w. Z. korntop. Ever hear tell on
him?
Mr.. Bordcn-No. Where did he get
all these initials?
Farmer horntop-Eamc his mother
,secn IN the graveyard over yonder
an took fancy to. "Hic facet VIII
liam Polk."-Ph:iadelph Press.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

Fuddy-Did you hear / eds wife
telling her little boy to stop asking
questions, or she'd punish him?
Rather nuinst that, eh?
Dnddy-May be; but the woman is
con. ;s,cnt. Just see how she has
punished Fred for asking that mo-
mcntoas question that n:ade them
husband and wife.-Boston Tran
script.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

Farmer Krick-Henry writes fer
mors money; says he wants to take
f.ncln' lessons.
MR.. K-icli-Wel!, fer goodness sake,
scna j., 20 him, Hiram! lt's the fust
useful ;.iay he's wanted 20 study
sence he went to coller, FF.p he
comes home ye kin jesse ....,n toerk
putin new fence front Z -, Ayuse.
Judge.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

Said the mistress of . Marseilles
shop to young-and impecunious-
journalist: This is the sixth time you
have been here without saying a word
about the money you owe me. mon
sier. What am to understand by it?"
"Ah, madame" said the witty jour
nalist, "when one sees you one forgets
everything."-LeV oleur.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

All NE knew AAeut Il.
The judge called the next case and
said to tramp who was ushered in:
"Where were you born?"
"Sir!" said the tramp.
"Where were you born7"
eyer honor, was born where me
mother use ter llve.-Chicago Times
Herald.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

The Elderly Gentleman-The true
secret of success Ii to find out what
the people want
The Younger Man-And give 1t to
them, eh?
The Elderly Gentleman-Nsw; cor
ner it.-Indianapolis Press.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

Miss clermont (giggling)-Mr. Cum
bersome told me he could "trip the
light fantastic toe" forever.
Miss Oxford-Well, he il certainly
always falling over his feet!-Brook-
lyn Eagle.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05
Deemed 1t Worth; 1rrSinG.
She laughed as she put down the pa


She laughed as she put down the pa
per.
"How silly some people are" she
said. 'Iiere's story of a New Jersey
woman who was i'll and pt rmi.ted y
man to bamboozle her into the belief
that she could be cured by kisses, as
result of which scandal followed"
Let ux not be too hasty in our judg-
ment," he replied, thoughfully. "Sinee
we became engaged your health has
been better than ever before"
That's So" she exclaimed, for some
how this had not occurred to her be-
fore.
Therefore" he continued. "lst us
overlook NO precautions"
And they overlooked nons.-Chicago
Post.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

Reflective Friend-Nine times out
OF ten a woman narries a man be-
cause she lis afraid he cannot live
without her.
Cynical Benedick-Yes, but I don't
see why she should marry him just
to prove that he can.-Town Topics.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

Ethel (aged seven)-Tommy. where
you s'posc our little brother come
from? Nurse says we found him un-
der the gooseberry bush!
Tommy tagcd fve) = Huh! We
didn't, either! Papa took him in on
subscription.-Puck.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

Husband-What do you do when you
hit your thumb with hammer? You
can't swear.
Wife-No; hut I can think with all
my might and main what perfectly
horrid, mean, inconsiderate. selfish
brute you are not to drive the nails
yourself.-N. Y. Weekly.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

. "Don't despair, Edward. even II
father doessay yoh'll be young enough
to marry five years from now
"Oh don't care for myself. but how
shout you?"-Philadelph Times.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

Doctor-Let me tell you this. my
friend; you seem TO look upon inhrm-
ity as something designed for your
punishment alone. You forget that 1t
IL the lot of all.
Paticnt-Yes, and you seem to for
get that il il the lot upon which you
have built your palatial home.-Rich-
siond Dispatch.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05
IRE. Our 0vrn o.aa..

Ersn Oar Own 0saay. Is.
This rose may once have bsen naidsn's
heart
That had It's biissful beat, its bitter snsft;
This thorn may once have been one Of the
teeth
VIVA which .shs tors az. neA. and bone
apart. - r1-s5z
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

De Funt (fond of conundrums)-
What is the difference between a dig
nified man and q stupid one?
De Blunt-Sone at all. N. Y.
Weekly.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

Mr.. staylate-Is that clock right?
Miss De Pink (wearily)-I think 1t
must need cleaning. It's been two
or three hours going that last hour.
N. Y. Weekly.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

ale seems to have . trained mind"
That's right. Did you notice how
quick he was in answering Yes, my
DEAR when his wife called hin?"-
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05
In the swim

Borrowell-Going to take = vacation
this summer?
Harauppe-Well. my landlord hasre-
que&ied me TO vacats.-Philadelphia
Record.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

It was one a. IN.
swell. young man." said his indig-
nant mother. "what have sou to say
for yourself?"
"aiuthef," he mildly replied. IA
there reat deal to be fai I think
I'll lie; q say it for NC. "--l.eYeland
Pain II r.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

PearI-so Dick gave you . lesson
in poker. What hand did you hold7
Ruby IL really can't remember.
Dick held my hand all the time.-Chi-
ca9o Daily News.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05
Pessisis Expiration.

$50 she IL married at last?"
Eyes. Doesn't 1t seem stranger"
"Oh, I don't know. It always has
been said that love 10 blind, you know,
and here We have proof of it."-Chi-
cago Post.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

The Lady-Killer-I suppose you'll
be going around telling everyone
that I'm fool?
The Lady-No. dear; there are some
things we must keep to ourselves
Ally Slcper.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

When q girl declares it's wrong to kiss.
IT'S an easy matter to see through II;
Like good Christian. the fair miss.
Would rather suffer wrong than do u.
-ChIcAEo Daily News.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

We have boiled the MIGRANT water.
We have sterllixed the milk.
We have strained the pfowling mtcsobe
Through the finest kind Of silk.
We have bought ard We havs borrowed
Every patent health device.
And at last the doctor tells US
That we've got to boil tbs Ice.
what to Eat.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

Why let the cares OF yesterday submsrge
to-day with sorrow?-
Take half the dose-and find way to SKIP
the rest tomorrow.
Chicago Rtcord-H Herald.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05
Springs of Mix-Conduct.

"You haven't any manners, Jack;
why d.Gi't you offer to escort that
young woman homc?"
"Ch, ] have manners all right; but
/ didn't have street car fare."-Chi-
cago Record-Herald.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

Il shows in his facs
That he goes the pace.
Nor strange that this should De-
For he goes the pace
Upon his face
Quite largely. don't you see!
Detroit Journal.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

woman has too much imagins-
ton"
"Oh, don't know; If she couldn't
imagine that man IL better than he
is she wouldn't marry him."-Chi-
csgo Record
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

Stout Man (whose appetite has been
the envy of his fellow-boarders)[
declare l have three buttons of my
vest.
Mistress of the House (who has been
aching to give him . hint)-You will
probably find them in the dining-room.
sir.-Tit-Bits.
The Meeker herald., 1901-10-05

Granite Dtsek wslghino 1,40O Tens.
The largest block of granite ever
quarried 10 being used in the construc-
ton of the Beachy Head lighthouse,
England. It comes from Cornwall,
weighs 100 tons and is 6s feet long,
20 feet wide and II feet deep.