Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1901-02-09

STOPS HIM AND BEGINS MY LITTLE STORY.
ionged to the swagger set while he was
yet half a block away. He had the
look of young man with rich papa,
loving mother and q mouth for
champagne. I stops him and begins
my little story. which includes 13 mis-.
fortunes and chunk of ingratitude as
big as house, when he cuts in with:
"Stow 1t, Gully. Where was you
born?"
'In the lap Of luxury" says I.
allow was you brought up?"
"On an allowance of $500 Il month"
"Where's your palace car"
"Switched off and left behind"
"And your valet"
dropped dead of heart disease the
other day. and I'm afraid can't fill
his place."
Look here, Gully" he goes on,
breathing extra dry champagne all
over the block and taking up million
dollar attitude, ~ think | knows a dis
lapldated gentleman when sees one"
I'D. G.. (dilapidated gentleman hits
me to dot" says l.
Anu you We got DiCepSl
Peel and see. Reaching out for
nlckels for the last 15 years has given
me the muscles of a Sandow. Best
thing in the world for shoulder exer-
else"
And, being a d!lapldated gentleman,
you ought to know how to put up your
dukes" W
put 'em up and tapped him one,
two. three on the chin.
"GoodI' says he II belongs to an S.
S. $. (swagger swell seb club down
here. and galoot with lisp smashed
my nose with the gloves half an hour
ago. want revenge. If you'll knock
his eyebrows off, I'll cough up V. |
can run you in all right, and l want
you to dope him"
ITS five to dope the chap with the
lisp" says |, but how much to bluff
the whole clubroom into their boots?"
"Can you do tY'
81 think | can"
"Lord, If you only could--if you only
could There's a dozen husky scrap.
pers there tonight, and If you bluff 'em
it's 10 plunkS in your inside pocket"
He lodged me into the club and into
n dressing room aud when | was ready
for the ring he introduced me as his
cousin sam of Pittsburg, had on a
pair of eyeglasses and my hair was
brushed back over my marble ears, and
/ looked profcssorish. They picked out
the champion scrapper of the club tc
wallop me, and when he got into the
ring he says:
you've got your glasses on"
"Of course" says |.
"But that amt regular"
I'm nighsightcd and always boz
with my winkcrs on. You so right
ahead and never mind EN-"
"l'll be hanged II | do!' says he al
he crawls under the ropes.
Then they got In another chap bu
he had only pulled one glove ON whcl
he looks over at me and sees me sitting
cross legged and smile on my face
and he says
Not any for Joe! knows tida
wave when | sees It, and don't han
ker after six months in the hospital"
The catosh young man who had pick
cd me up offers $40, $50, $40 for any
body to stand before me for thre
rounds. but the crowd shake thei
heads and wait for something easy,
was the eyeglasses, you know--a regu
lar ice cold blulf-and they swailowe
II down and had goosenesh all owe
'em,
"Bcing as this crowd don't seem I
want anything in particular OF IN
Cousin Sam" says young catosh afte
awhile, "and being my Cousin SAL
has three or four important engage
ments on hand, | will withdraw hr
till some of you think you can box
bit"
And as | was resumlng my appar'
he slips me the II plunks and pats m
on the back and says:
I'D. q. tdlapidatcd gentlcman), if
wasn't my papa's favorite son and nj
mammals JOY I'd hitch up with yo'
and we'd travel together and have Ia
rels of fun. AS II Is, I'm stuck her
But take your sugar and 20 forth, VII
my blessing lrltched behind you
NJ Oman.