The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1901-02-27
A. SENATOR'S QUAINT HUMOR

| - ~ 40 ~ Az
The Ship Subsidy Debate EN-
livened by Unique Arrangement
of Democrats.
Senator Pettus, of Alabama, has de.
livered a notable speech on the ship
subsidy bill, which was repletc with
quaint humor, and was n unique az
raignment of Democrats who would
vote for the bill, which he urged ought
not to pass because of the millions il
would draw from the treasury by
violating principle imbedded in the
constitution. Mr.. Pettus spoke in part
as follows:
The sums demonstrate the wonder
ful intellectual force of the framers OF
this bill and their clear comprehension
of commercial advantages, resulting
from having your own lawyer to write
the laws for you, 80 as to fit the awl to
the facts and circumstances of your
case.
The moral part of the transaction, if
any, may well be referred to DR.. Paley
or one of his successors. | Will only
say it might be little like the COM
ment on an ex-senator from Alabama,
who was then in the law practice with
partner-both great lawyers and
good men--real leaders at the bar.
They practiccd in the wire-grass coun-
:.cs of Alabama. In the summer
1865 cotton was selling as high as
so cents per pound. The Yankees"
Il merely quote) wanted the cot
ton and they took the cotton. From
one old farmer they took over 100
bales, merely on the plea that they
needed it in their business. The ex-
Senator and his partner Colonel c.
were employed to recover the cotton.
But about that time Colonel G.. went
off on business and the ex-senator was
left to manage the case alone. He
was equal TO the task, or almost any
other, il ability was the thing needed.
There were no courts. So the ex-
Senator went 10 the head military
officer Of that "province" and recover
ed the cotton and received his fee. If
.ou had ever heard his voice deep as
church bell, earnest almost to ad.
duration, with will power in every
tone) you would know why that cotton
did not go into the dive for captured
and abandoned property" Colonel G.
returned, sad and poor, repeating over
to himself, to keep up his courage
10 there, for honest poverty,
That hangs its head, and a that?
The coward slave, we pass him by
We dare be poor for a that!
For a that and a that;
Our tolls .obscure, and a that;
The rank is but the guinea's stamp;
The mans the gowu for a that.
This Colonel was not accustomed to
being poor, nor did he have any "long.
ing" for the beauties or blessings of
poverty. He went 10 his Office and
met his partner, who handed him
81 800 without saying word. "What
am l to do with all this money 2" de-
manded the Colonel. "That Is your
half of our fee in the cotton case,"
answered his partner.
The Colonel counted over the money
with great gravity, yet solemnly smil-
ing, and 'hen he had finished the
count he turned to his partner and
with philosophical solemmty remarked +,
shaking his head: Z" Well, well, we
have escaped the poorhousc, but are
we not rubbing up against the walls OF
the penitentiary?" lLaugbter.l
Dir. President, 81 tell tho tale as it
was told to me-" 1t is old, and there
are other versions. The beneficiaries
under this bill, if it passes, can never
be in danger Of the poorhouse.
There is q very unusual and crafty
method in this bill; the subsidy must
first be contracted for, and the con-
tract is to be made by the United States
of the first part, acting by the Secre-
tary of the Treasury, and the ship
owner on the other part. The purpose
in framing the act so as to operate by
contract and not directly is twofold.
The first purpose is TO prefer favorities,
whose ships are distinctly pointed out
by description, partly finished and
with an established trade, and partly
to be built in foreign shipyards, viii
contracts for their building, filed two
years ago, Illegally, in The office of the
Secretary of the Treasury, as have
heretofore explained.
The second purpose Is to fasten
liability on the United States bv con.
tract which, the shipowners claim and
this bill provides, can not be changed
or violated without impairing the obi
CATION Of the contract.
This is radical departure from the
ordinary course Of Legislation Fol
example, the Congress for years ha,
been engaged every session in granting
authority 70 railroads and other corpo
ratlons to build bridges across th,
nsvigable waters in the States ant
Territories. These grants Of authorit,
to build bridges always amount TO
contract between the United State
and the bridge owner, because th,
United States always requires that tn
government shall have the right to us
: the bridge as post road and highway
SO that there is consideration for tn
grant. These bridges are very costly
some Of them costing over 100000
and some Of them costing over 81 900
900. Yet the Congress always puts int
: these bridge acts the clause reservin
8 the right on the part Of the govern
ment to amend or repeal the grant &
0 any time in the future.
We are all accustomed to see th
Q bridge bills reported by the junit
n Senator from Missouri [Mr. Vest
Q and he, with the eye of an eagle an
9 courage unlimited, sees al a glance Il