The sun., 1901-09-15
CRANKSAT THE WHITE HOUSE.
MOST or THEN AMUSING AND
FEW ARE DANGEROUS.
Dspssmaey IN Dealing WIN Gensseman
wbs wanted . Light From "mns"
ugar-king Midas Caiis-Oner ef
Csst-On Clothes for Mrs. Cleveland.

DtU301un9y hsta44A8 WIN
whs wanted . Light From "Bit's"
usar-King Midas C.Ils-Oner Of
Css,-On Clothes for My. Cleveland.
WASHINGTON. SEPT. N-Throushout thu
lareer part Of the year the White House " q
magnet for cranls Of all sorts and descrip-
tions, male and female. In the main they
are harmless and their idiosynorasies arc
on the humorous side and the doorkeepers
and tho Secret Service men about the Ell
ecutive Mansion know how to deal sum
mArily with them. They are shupted
.,r OF Washington on the double quick.
But while there are more Of the sppsr-
snfly dangerous cranks than the public
ever hears anything about. they sre GER
tainly not 80 numerous as might bs en-
pected. considering the accessibility OF tho
White House To everybody and tho dem
ocratio manner In which the crowds
nockins 10 II are handled.
Whii- Corigr,-u- is in session hardly Q day
passes without half a dozen persons who
are obviously wrong IN their heads attempt
ing to gain tho Presidents ear. Many OF
these afflicted individuals are men and wo-
men who have repaired to Washington 20
push imaginary or totally unfounded claims
against the Federal Government. and
whose III SUCCESS In such effort. has added
their poor twisted brains moro than ever
In besiesing tho White House doors their
one idea IL 20 obtain an opportunity to tell
the stories Of their claims TO the Chief Ma sis-
nate and invoke his assistance In the
furthertng Of them In Congress. These
never reach the President, Of course. tut
most OF them ara content when they are
received with ceremony and consideration.
not to say solemnity. by the doorkeepers.
even u they are thus gradually famed
Into the outer air.
None Of the cranks who 20 20 the White
Hou-e are turned down hard by the at
tendants. by diplomacy. as experience
has proved. they are best got nd Of, and
most Of them are overwhelmed 10y the
salaaming OF the sclf-contained attaches
about the doors, that far from feeling badly
over Il. when they find themselves gently
edged out they depart with beamins coun-
tenanoes and In a highly -hattered state Of
mind.
A good-looking. well-dre-sed man OF
middle age. whose face. however. wore
q steady Haccid grin and whose eyes had
q queer look In them. sauntered up 10 the
White House door one afternoon In the
second winter Of President McKinley's
nrst incumbency. He had an unlightod.
half -smoked cigar Ia his teeth
'Howdy,' SAID he. Pleasantly. to tho
tall doorkeeper who swung the door open
for him. Bill in?'
The doorkeeper replied that the President
was out driving.
Too bad. too bad sighed the man
with the queer grin ard the odd eyes.
-Durn the luck-thats what ] ssyl'
Tho doorkeeper politely asked him
his business with tho President Was %
pressing A. all that.
YES replied the visitor. mournfully.
1T Is, A. you see.' holding out his un-
hghted. half-smoked cigar. my weed
has gone out wanted Bill TO give me .
hight. He promised me In the year iisA,
at the battle Of Hastings-which. a. you
remember. won hands down-that n
ever ny cigar went out, all I'd have TO do
would be 20 drop in on him and gst light.
Too bad. too bad'' And the man again
sighed miserably.
wait a minute said the doorkeeper.
Il hear the rattle OF the Presidents car
riage-hes coming In the back way. III
go him. and. leaving another attendant
to keep an eye ON the man with the In
efYaoeabe grin. he slipped into the passage,
lighted . cigar. and, after waiting q NOM
ent. returned With II In his hand
M NoEiol,v,. r.o.w.~, ...,r.nc~.
- ,s-'.t'
o' ns "ss' oN'n'suirnsu conS'o,'s''Dn'
said tho doorkeeper. With great soiemnity,
holding out the cigar. and here In his
cigar. from which he texs that YOU will
.T-s.,,, |. H.,, o., xo,,r own
- ~
lhere was an etpre-eoh sifnos' OF rap
ture on the mans face a. he took the cigar
and applied the burning end Of Il 20 his
own. He rrturned the President. cigar.
80, - =, h,. h.n1. ,,.,n IA. r.,
PNou oo." VI ' ".'' , ~ ~ -
and bowed deeply 70 the doo'keeper, VINO
returned the kowtow an ceremoniously
and hacked out. saving:
.r.u nan 20 ,oin re nth Oh. .r,rx An
S,.-. -, -,,,i..l
F~hoc'e NJ '~oh'y hAh"'" P"S' S'oA'
moon time.
Then he passed out putting vigorously
nj his cigar and he never appeared at the
WIT. Uou.. .o,.r~.ra contrary % ,h.
.
expectations OF the doorkeepers' who had
figured that he'd be dropping In every
day for n bit Of the fire from the Presidents .
cic.r
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