Arizona daily citizen., 1901-01-19
Leaves From
a Reporters Book.

| Fool what fool fool ~ snorted the
dyspeptc in tones which betrayed the
presence of hot biscuits in process of
not benevolent assimilation in his
stomach. "Here, little sister, is a story
OF man who put the sign, will be back
in one hour on his office door and when
he can returned sat down ON the steps
to wait Tor himself to come back. And
that they call absent mindedness. It's
nothing but pure insanity"
Didn't you do things nearly as bad
week ago? "said the elder sister, re-
provingly.
But there was cause for that, my
dear" retorted the dyspeptic.
Love? querried the elder sister.
Liver, snorted the dyspeptIc, ~
say a man would be fool TO do such
thing as that" and he pounded the
paper with his foreinger. ''They call
that absence Of mind, but call it hope
less absense OF BRAIN The dyspepiic
was incorrigable in such a humor and
the elder sister knew it.
John dear, that poplar tree in the
yard has a dead limb on it and the next
high will break ii off and carry it onto
the shed roof wish you would saw
it off before it crusbes the roof" said
the elder sister anxious TO give him ex-
ercise enough to digest the biscuits
which were playing hob with his tenn
per-
"a man who forgets his necktie is a
numbskulI, aud man who sits down
and waits tor himself 10 come back
couldn't cat enough bFainfood in a
year to raise respectable idea, and"
the rest Of the profound and valuable
discourse upon the quality Of absent
mindcdnesF MAS lost as the dyspeptic
went in search OF the saw. When he
reappeared in the doorway coatless and
armed with large handsaw his face
bore the look Of crusade and his mind
was evidently filled with the subject Of
absent mindedness. His sister accom-
panied him to the tree and as he climbed
up handed the saw TO him. The limb
was large one about twenty feet from
the ground and hard to ge, at. After
swo or three Intellectual attempts 10 start
the cut the dyspeptic began TO feel irri-
table. Then the elder sister thought
she would help him
Put your right foot on that branch
and your left on the limb" the elder
sister called TO him.
"Madan.," said the dyspeptic with
great dignity, II am about to cut this
lilch. IL is mathematical problem
quite above the comprehension of thu
feminine mind. must do il alone Oh
will you violate the social convention
i by climbing this tree and doing il your
self1f
j The elder sister had no intention al
trifling with that humor, and she beat q
hasty retreat. The dyspeptic gloated
over his victory, and fell to thinking
about the verses OF the Persian Omar
which he had been reading. As he sas
running them over in his mind be strad-
died the limb about three feet from the
trunk, With his face to the center, and
| began TO saw. Soon the rhythmic move
ment OF the blade set him to chanting
$40 Thou who aidst with pltfall rnd with gin
Reset the way was 70 wander in,
Thou VIII not vita predessined evil round
Kumesh, and then impase my iati to sin
Hardly had the final word left his
i mouth when the limb, sawed clear, fell
with crash, bearing the amazed dys.
peptic with it. He had sawed the
] lint off between himself and the tree,
No think yoa can impute my fall
/ to insanity instead Of sin," said the
dyspeptic from the ground where he
had fallen.
! Beyond a sound jar the d, speptic was
uninjured and he gathered himself toge'
! ther and limped off to the house. AS hs
icrossei the porch where the elder sister
was holding her sides with suppressed
laughter, his eye lit upon the pape'
which contained the story of the absent
minded man. He glanced at it a nom
ent then kicked it with his foot ana
said:
There are more kinds of fools thar
one abroad in the land