Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1901-08-03
HE WAY IT HAPPENED


Tonight" said the young hardware clerk
20 himself, and an expression of quiet de-
termination mounted his features, tonight
am going to see Hattie's father and tell
him that / want TO marry his daughter"
He was fully aware that Hattie's father
was pretty grim sort of a man, pos
sessed OF very shrewd eye in looking
clear through young men.
The young hardware clerk had never been
able to ascertain whether he was much Of
a hit with the old gentleman or not. He
was likewise fully ccgnizant of the fact
was this young hardware clerk who want ed
Hattie. and wanted her bad, that $40 per
week. his present income, wasn't much of a
weekly wad wherewith to take proper care
OF girl whose father was master plum
Der In good practice; but he saw other
young married folks doing the $50 per
stunt. and he didn't see why he and Hattie
couldn't make it stick. He had asked Hat
tie what she thought about it. and Hattie
had replied by dropping into his strong.
rnanly-but there are some matters into
which rank outsides have no right to probe
Yep. again unused the young hardware
clerk. 1onight's the night for me to brace
the old boy for Hat, and I'm going to put
on my good hunch rags and make the
break for sure"
And he did.
house with more or less trepidation, and
that when the hired girl told him that Miss
Hattie was dressing and would be down In
minute. there was some huskiness in his
tene as he told the hired girl that for the
present he desired to have a private con-
versation with Mr.. Plugleak.
The young hardware clerk sat on the
edge of a chair in the parlor. twiddling his
$1.3S Panama, when he heard a heavy
padded footstep in the hall. and there's no
doubt in life that he felt just trife queer
when Hats father. in his shirt-sleeves and
slippers. with cigar in the left-hand cor
Eer OF his grim face, and an evening pa
per in his hand, showed up in the hall.
Good evening, Mr.. Plugleak," said the
young hardware clerk, in perfectly nat
ural voice, for he had, for all his trepida-
ton, quite succeeded in mastering his feel
ings. ut may be that you surmise why 1t
is that I have asked for little private
talk with you this evening. l want to
marry Hattie. Hat says she's willing, and
I've been fond of her ever since she was a
little bit Of thing. and guess she thinks
she'll be able to get along with me all
right, and SO I'm asking you. That's all"
Now, 1t is right at this point that the
present narrative necessarily differs from
all narratives whatsoever Of similar char
acter In the funny papers.
The funny paper narrative would. by
wanton and impossible deviation from all
truth and nature. depict the young hard
ware clerk as executing hasty departure
from Mr.. Plugleak's front door, with the
aid of the right shoe on Mr.. Plugleak's No.
IL boot. and on his hurried way down the
front steps the unfortunate young hard
ware clerk would be exhibited as stepping
on toy express wagon that had been ac-
tie brother, thereby accelerating his exit
and causing his coat tails to fly up around
his head and his collar to burst at the
buttonholes, and all that sort Of thing.
Of fact, and not even for the purpose Of
evoking the uncomfortable glee of the read
er OF this narrative can the present writer
swerve from his manifest duty of abiding
by the whole truth and nothing but the
truth.
Consequently:
"Oh, that's 1t. Ell. son?' said Mr. Plug
leak. with half smile stealing over his
chair and took long pull at his cigar
We'll. I've been kind O. thinking that
you've been making up to Hat. It's all
right, my boy, l suppose. Hats q good
girl, and I know that she likes you, and
don't see any reason why you two shouldn't
get married. I want the girl to marry the
man Of her own pick I've had a word or
so about you on the quiet with some folks
that know you, and they tell me that
you're pretty steady lad. don't know
anything about how you're fixed. but you're
young and can't be making a great deal Of
money yet. but I guess we can attend to
that bit in the way of giving you and
Hat little push along at the outset of
your marriage and afterward as the occa-
sion arises. AS far as that's concerned.
married Hats mother when 1 was making
only $12 week. but this is different
period, OF course, and young folks of this
day have to have a lot Of things that we
didn't know anything about when was
young. All right. boy. you go ahead and
marry Hat II you want to and she wants
to, and ] guess that's all firmly enough
decided upon between the pair Of you. and
I'll see that you won't go up against it In
case OF sickness Or embarrassment or any
thing like that. Hats mother. by the way,
thinks you're pretty nice boy, too. and
I'll just drop back to the sitting room and
Cell her about it,
Much obliged. pop" said the young
hardware clerk, getting up and shaking
hands with his future father-in-law, and
four or five minutes later Hat was down in
hugging her affectionately and weeping just
a little. and old Mr.. Plugleak was cough
ing quite good deal and telling the young
hardware clerk Of his idea of the Schley-
Sampson controversy.
That's just exactly the way 1t happened.
There isn't anything screechingly funny
about it. but it happened that way, all
right.
If the father-in-1aw of this period were
to go after any self-respecting youth, as
piring to the hand Of his daughter. with
bull dog or the toe Of his boot he'd be
holy show In his neighborhood. and as like
as not the members of his family would
fix up a packed lunacy commission to have
him railroaded to foolish house.
Nevertheless, it'll probably be many years
before there's any bridging OF the yawning
chasm that divides fact and funniness.
Beers on British Bravery.
From South Africa.
A representative Of a Ceylon journal.