Arizona republican., 1901-02-03
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 llTIlE JAMl 5.
(The Young Man who didn't Breathe
 through his Nose.l

|
 through his Nose.)
 They's Girl at lives nex' door to our house wot goes aroun' Singln' Love songs an about dyin' of Dislocated Harts. Her Bow is a Young Man at won her Hart by workin' in a Candy store an takin' her to the Pioneer Ban Matinee on Sunday Afternoon. The Young Man parts his Hare in the | Center an Spen's the rest of his Salery | makln' his Girl believe he's a Warm Artical. Ills Candy Bill don't cost him nothin', but he's all the time Afrade the Boss'll ketch him at 1t. He's got the | Girl Strung all Rite an he's been a | trlen to git the Ole Man on the Hook. his Studies kind o' Undermined him an he's in Fenlx fer hls Helth. He don't haf to work. but he hates t O be Idol. so he's accepted the posishun of Confidenshul Clerk In the Candy Store. The Bisness was Run down when he went in. but he got 1t on its Feat an he erlmbles to think wot the Ownerll do when he Is compelled ney' spring to go back to F'iladelfy and resoom his Leglc Studies an his Posishun in the 400 The Girl thinks they's only 395 of 'em Without him. He makes the Ole Man think he's Pour In Pollytix wen he's at Filadelfy. He sez f he'd had his Helth the Quay Flte'd a turned out Diffrunt. John Wannymaker wrote fer him to hurry home an nhro hlsself into the Brooches. He offers 10 sho the Girls Ole Man the letter fun Wanny- maker. but he cant find 1t in his pock- ct, but sex he Gessed he mus a left 1t Lyin' on the f'lanner In his Rooms.
 The Ole Man don't kno whether he wants this Candy salesman in his Fambly CT not. He don't kno but he may be givin' him . Hot Blast He kind O thinks he's a Lier in Dlsgizc an he begins to git suspishus of his Stalk of generl infermashun. fer the young man don't Breethe through his Nose Ennuf an he lets the Ole Man have too much time to think by not givln' him a Chanst to Repll some times. The Candy Expert he's all the time tcllln' how they do In Filadelfy. but he sez Arizony hain't Filadelfy and some bad Brakes here Is Nacherl He sez they make him tired, but as he .hain't Flnanshully interested, he don't say Nothn'.
 He sez las nlte, sez he: "The great est Need of yer Iegislater Is some law have a Formlc Introducshun. I was out to the Leglslater this Afternoon an I cuddent hardly Restrane myself They was makin' a Fatle mistake wotll cos Arizony good many hund- rcd dollars at cud "a been saved by a knollidge of law. All them AK they Past today Is Null an Void an of no Effcck." How's that?" asts the Girls Ole man. "It's Lesfe Iollerday." sez the Candy Prints. "Good Gawd!" sez the Ole Man. gittin' excited; "a feller list give me his Note today" Tt tain't Worth the Paper it's Rote on," sez the Candy King: "you better Take 1t Back to him Monday an git him to Renew It." The Ole Man was Prancin' aroun' askin' everybody f they'd seen Hostetter'a Bitters Alnaneck, but they Cuddept find 1t. Then he asts the Candy Emperer, sez he: "Wot Holler- day Is this?" The Young Man he sez, "It's Groun' Hog Nay Tie Ole Man sot down an looked Relieved fer a mint 'er two an then got Restless an Glaired at the Candy suvrin, an purty soon he got Restless. too, an made a excuse to Skin out.
 Wen he was gon the Ole Man sez to Glsddus. thse's the Girl, sez he. "Gladdus, I Tfoap, you won't be the Meens of putin yer ole Father on Trile her his life. F I see that Young Eel Ter back her aEln Somebody's goin' to be Charged with Murder.
 LITTLE JAMES.