The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1901-03-17
{ copyrighted, 1901, by Robert Howard Russe!l.l}

A Bull Calf that came on as one OF the
Realistic Features of a Drama of Rural
Life, a Trick Dog connected with a Varie-
~ Troupe and a Grand Opera Swan used
in 'Lohengrin' found themselves together
in a Baggage Car on their way to the next
Week Stand. After the manner of Pro-
fessionals they fell TO discussing Histrionic
Art. the Operations of the Syndicate and
the Tendencies of the American Stage. Also
they had something TO say about their Per-
sonal Triumphs and the Swell Notices they
had received in Pulaski, Great Falls and
Prairie du Chen.
Does it not Strike you that the Drama
is more or less to the Bad in this Country?'
asked the Clown Dog. rs it a true Elk
preston of our National Impulse or a mere
Pandering to the Low Brows so as-to keep
up a steady Jingle at the Box Officer
The Times are out of joint said the
Bull Calf ~thoughtfully. Last week we
played against the 126-pound Champion,
who is Starring in a Piece called The Po-
lite Pug, or Dead Men Tell no Tales and
he beat us Nine Hundred on the Week, al
though We are giving a clean Pastoral Play
with so much Heart Interest in it that the
Ushers have to go around and use Mops be-
Inc <AClS- III dOulllOn 10 me-anQ Il
may say that L save the Performance-we
have a Flock Of Turkeys. a Load of Hay
and a Quartet of Pale Artists with Hick-
DRY Shirts and Diamond Rings who come
out and put their Heads together and sing
We Float, We Float as Over the Waves
We Float Every one wears Whiskers and
says Col ding it, We certainly get the
Atmosphere of the Farm, and | don't see
why we shouldn't have them standing in
the Aisles every Matinee and Night
What you say is True" assented the
Trick Poodle. 1T is not Actual Merit that
counts with a Shallow Public. For in
stance, / have been working for Nine
Months TO learn a Back Twister, and vet
last Week our Act proved to be a Polish
and all the Hands came out for a Band of
Pickaninnies. They worked with a Serio-
Comic who had her Name on the Stat and
let them earn the Salary. I'll tell you there
Is not much Incentive to do Straight Work
and preserve the Unities when a lot of fat
footed Buck Dancers with Heads shaped
like Egg Plants can come out and kill the
House and get four or five Curtain Calls.
You should consider yourself Fortunate
he added, turning to the 'Lohengrin''
Swan. Your form of Entertainment is the
only one that has escaped the Ravages of
Rag Time and the Soft Shoe Dancers"
1--WE have Troubles of our own" said the
Swan, as a Tear glistened in its Eye. Did
you ever try to interpret the Music-Drama
with a lot of the Best People in Front?
Did you ever Rehearse for Four Weeks so
as to make an Effective Entrance and then
come on only to see the cleaning Cold
Shoulders and realize that the Box Holders
had squared around the other way and were
telling one Another what was going TO
Come Out at the next Divorce Trial? That
is the Moment when Art gets a short-arm
JOLT"
Il sometimes think that the only Dis
eliminating Critics are in the One-Night
Stands" said the Bull Calf. why, | got
every Hand when l walked on at Upper
Sandusky and began TO eat Hay. Our
Quartet was called back seven times for
its Imitation of the Banjo, the Church Or
gan and the Steam Calliope."
What grieves me most is to find that
those who would conserve the Purity Of the