Tazewell Republican. [volume] (Tazewell, Va.) 1892-1919, 1901-08-01
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/ JUGGER'S COW /
I BY Tom p. Morgan. ]
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(Erom Peoples Home Journal Reprinted by
PsrmisSion.)

| A I JUGGER'S, under a crazy-quilt
~ in a darkened room, lies the tat
tered remnant of once strong man.
That wreck is the indirect result OF
Iugger's great thought that, in order
to have fortune within his grasp, to
have the world by the tail, so to
speak, he must buy cow.
The gentle beeze has not yet
blown the dust off from the trees by
the roadside where the turnpike goes
over the hill, behind which the cow
that was to have made Jugger's for
tune disappeared.
On the shelf in the sitting-room is
the primitive cause of Jugger's woe,
the Farmer and Stockman's Friend,
edited by an enthusiastic agricultur-
list. Jugger read of the happy own
ers of those wonderful cows so often
met in literature, but rarely else
where, that seem to have consecrat-
ed their whole souls to the giving of
great bucketfuls of milk so rich that
two shivers will make butter of it
read and believed, and was filled with
a burning desire to go and do like
wise. Like the owners, l mean, not
like the cows.
"My DEAR" he said to his wife, I'VE
must buy a cow. Think of the luxury
of fresh, sweet milk and golden but
ter! Why, we can have all the milk
we can use and butter till you can't
rest, and we can have plenty to give
to our friends. Then, think of the
profits! Why, we can sell the milk
and butter and eggs and the
cheese"
"And the crackers" suggested Mrs.
Jugger.
Jugger paid no attention to the
fling, but continues:
There will be calf to sell, now
and then, we can sell the COW to
the butchers at the end of six months
for good price. We ought to get
as quarts of milk and five or six
pounds of butter-say five per week.
Milk brings seven cents per quart,
and butter &c cents per pound.
Ought's ought and figures a figure;
that would be $4.66 per week-call it
$3.50 per week-$234 per year. Add to
this the sum we get for the COW from
the butchers. say $40, and we have
1914 Think of it! Think of it! De-
cidedlv, we must have a GOVT"
at seems quite a profitable invest
ment," agreed Mrs. Jugger, especial
" when one reflects that you only
had to feed your imaginary cow for
six months, having sold her to the
butchers at the end of that time,
while you got the price of the butter
and eggs and calves and so on for
whole year"
MADAM" said Juggers, severely,
twill you oblige me by keeping your
mouth shut? There never was any
use in trying to argue with a woman!
They are fools! But we will have the
COW, all the same!"
That very afternoon the cow APP
peared on the scene. She WIS tied
which was drawn by pair of rusty
looking mules, and chaperoned, so to
speak. by a gangle-shanked, plank
shaped man, with a mouth on him
cut remarkably decOllete and a
beard like the whiskers on a cocoa
nut. Maybe Jugger looked like he
wanted a COW. At any rate they were
soon pickering and chaffering, and
presently Jugger parted with forty
one large dollars and became the pos
SCISSOR of the COW.
The plank-shaped man tied her to
the hitching-post, just outside the
front gate and drove away Then
Jupger called his wife out to view the
prize.
"Gentle?'' said Jugger, in response
TO question from his spouse
nCourse she is! Gentle as a lamb!
He said so. And a good mixer?
Why. gee-fuzz, he says she will give
inst all can milk! That's what ne
said Eat? Eats next to nothing!
He said so. Rich milk? Why, lawzy
me it's almost clear cream! He said
twas. Skittish? Thunder, no
That's what he said. Believe I'll milk
her a little now, just to show you
how easy il island he added suggest
lively: "a good drink of pure rich
cream wouldn't taste so bad, eh?"
Mrs. Jugger allowed that it would
nj. and her husband went to the
house for pail.
The cow was not beauty, Ou'
looked robust and untroubled by ennul'
She was quaint of body and long OF
limb One horn turned up and the
other down, and her tail was almost
innocent OF hair.
"The signs of a good milker!" said
Juooer. in answer to an inquiry from
his better-half. 1.-THE man said So"
Instead of one pail, Jugger hac
brought two, the very largest in the
house.
Thought 1 might as we'll milk heI
drv while 1 was at it," he explained
"sheu pretty nearly fill both these
nails, Give all can milk, he said"
A second after Jugger hat
crouched down beside the COW, an(
given a gentle pull at one teat, his
wife was surprised to see him turf
pretty fair back somerset and land
with his head in the pail that he hat
, set aside for use after he had milkeC
) the first pail full. The other pail wa
kicked one half-second later thar
Jugger, and came very near breaking
one of Mrs. Jugger's limbs.
THAT must have been the wront
: SIDE" groaned Jugger, after he ha'
picked himself up and pulled hi
head out of the pail.
' He sought the opposite side of tn
e COW, and the space of quick-drawl
( breath later found that the ANNA
= had attempted to kick the pail clea
through him.
"How gentle she isl" sneered Mrs
: Jugger THE good man said sh
: vvas And she'll rive all the milk