The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1901-11-22
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Charles-Did the tailor take your
measure? Algy-I think he did. He
said I'd have to pay in advance.-Tit-
Bits.
Briggs-1 hear you have been operat-
ing in Wall street. Griggs-A great
mistake. I've been operated upon
Harper's Razar.
81 wonder what papa always calls
mamma Honey for?" queried little
AIargie. Il don't know" replied her
small brother, unless it's because she
wears conlb.'
What reform are you interested; in
now:' Il am advocating that people
be paid double for the work they do
when they don't feel like working
Chicago Record.
said one Englishman. "General:" asked
the other: NO, journalist" ''Oh, see.
You were 4 reporter; not regretter.'-
Washington Star.
san Easy Rule Hard to Follow: Rox-
It's easy to win woman's love; just
give her all the money she wants. Blox
You don't call that easy. do you?-
Detroit Free Press.
Rushed: Parke-Are you doing much
in your business now? Lane-Well.
should say so. Why, We are SO busy
that we employ man to insult new
customers.-TownT Topics.
How is brother, Tommy" I'LL in
bed, miss. He's hurt himself" "How
did he do that?" I'VE were playing at
who could lean farthest out of the Win
dow, and he ."-Tit-Bits.
Farmer Honk-Your niece, that's just
graduated from the academy, does fan
cy work most Of the time, doesn't she?
Farmer Flintrock-Yes; an she don't
fancy work none Of the time.
Faith in Him: Towne-Do under
stand you to say that Spender's case
was really faith cure? Browne-Yes.
You see, the doctor and the druggist
both trusted him.-Philadelphia Press.
Interested Party-And so you are
married now, Lydia? l hope your hus-
band is a good provider. The Bride
Deed he is. missus: He provided me
three new places to wash at last week.
Don't you miss your husband very
much now that he is away?" "Oh, no!
At breakfast just stand his newspaper
up in front of plate, and half the time
really forget he isn't there. Tx
change.
Beginning at Home: Jasper-1 un-
derstood that you had turned over a
new leaf, and were even going to love
your enemies; but it seems to me that
you love no one but yourself. "Well. l
am my own worst enemy."-Life.
Sufficient Evidences: Sambo-Whar
you get dat chicken? Mark Anthony
Nebber you mind bout dat chicken.
'Tain't yours. Samb0-H0w you know
faint? Mark Anthony-'Cause found
hit in youah coop.-New York Weekly.
Here's distinguished scientist who
says that, after all, there is nothing in
germs" Nothing in germs? Non
sense! Why. look how much the doc
tors have made out OF m"-Detroit
Free Press
20 sir. please, have swallowed a
pin:" exclaimed Il servant girl, running
into her employers room. "Never mind.
Mary" he replied. deep in study, ''nev-
er mind; here's another" drawing one
from his pincushiOn.
"rhose strings" said the first fish,
Hanging down in the water with
worms on the end of them mean dan
GER" How do you know" asked the
other. "Oh, l can read between the
lines. "-Philadelphia Press.
lis you gwine ter let dat mewei do
rs he pleaseY asked Uncle Ephraim's
wife. "Wha's YOU will power?" my
will powers all right" he answered.
"You jest want ter come out hyar an
measure dis here mewel's won't pow
err"
''How much are you getting for that?'
0V dShCu lAc AdAS WIZ "do AAO " Leg
the lawn. Nothing" replied the man
Then you're fool" II know it; but
as own this place, and can't get away
from it, I've been fool a long while. u
philadelphia Record.
Kindly Visitor-Mrs. A., what do you
suppose makes you suffer so? Mrs. A.
Il don't know, am sure; and be
lieve nothing but a post-mortem will
ever show. Kindly Visitor-You poor
thing! You are so weak that you can
never stand that.-Tit-Bits.
81 think I'll have some of those crul
lers," said Jones at the lunch counter
''don't you want some? NO." replied
Smith; ''they don't agree with me.
t'That so?'' Eyes; I couldn't even ca
the hole in one without getting dys
pepsia." -Philadelphia Record.
Mike" said Flooding Pete, do you
t'ink it does a man much good to &C