Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1901-03-13
Madison Journal.
Dinnis DooIy Writes His Brother
Moike On Primary Election Bill
Discussion.

My dear Brother Moike: I'm sti'i
houldin' me job and havin' the tonne
iy me loife, but how long twill last /
donno, they say twill not be long be-
fure little Bob begins swingin' his axe
and tbs loikely me head will fall with
the rest iv tn lads that has wurreked
so haired for tn good iv tn Oh cause.
They is havin tn Divils own tonne
in tn legislator this winter. Ye SEE
wan iv tn sinitors intorjuced bill in
favor iv primery 'lections-~a primery
lection, Moike, does away with phat
Shakepere calls 9Th tonne honored
custim Nv by-sone age"-which
means tibet there won't be onny eau
cuses or convintions but the people
will go to tn poles and vote for tn
min they want for candy-dates and no
questions asst, it's a poor bill Moihe
and OF to be kilt 1.-THE bill shuld pass
what wud becum Nv the gang iv lads
| tibet has bin runnin' the caucuses and
| convintions for tn las forty yerS
they'd hay' to find some other diver
sion and maybe some iv thin wud hav
to go 70 wurruk, 'twud be harrud on
thin sure.
Theirs a man be tn name iv Jimmy
Monahan, yed think be his name and
his pictures in tn papers that he's
Irish but he isent, (excipt for politi
cal purposes). He lives in Darlington
most iy tn tonne, town tibet sinds
luneticks to tn insane 'sylum in
lunches iv seven, and he runs news,
paper an tn post-ofis an houIds an
offs here in Madison and comes here
wonst in whole to luck at it and
draw his pay.
Well, Jimmy made a speech tn
other day befure tn comfy thets
tryin to find tn weak pints in the bill
and can't.
Twas a GRAND speech and beat
anything iver heard in me loife,
not exception Billy Bryan's speech
in 80.
Gentlemen of the comfy" he says,
''the ould fashioned caucus has bin tn
wet nurse of all the great pollytish-
ms and statesmin iv our glorious coun-
try, (applause) mesilf included. tgre, t
applause) and if We think" be says,
that ye can raise statesmin loike
mes:'f on a primary lection bottle ye
make the mistake iv your loife." Tire
menus applause).
IF We pass this bill" he says. "our
beloved party tn grand old Re.
publican party, tn party iv Lincoln
and Scofield. (uprorus applause) will
be wiped off tn map. (Cries iv good
enough by the Dimmycrats and bully
fir Jim.)
"And maybe, he says, 81 Will lose
me job in Madison and tn post-ofis in
Darlington" he says, but" he says,
Il am not thinking iv mesilf," he says.
cor me partner" (applause) he says,
"but, iv Wisconsin land of beauty,
Csc by mai) he says, "and iv tn
whole United States" he says, zap
plause) (which will go to tn 'ternal
Pow-wows," he says, eff they dispinse
with me invaluable sarvises," he says,
at 100000 year." he says, (subjued
applause).
And tn farmers! me ould frinds.
me cash in advance payin subscribers,
tn farmers, applause by editors in
the gallery how me heart goes out
to thin poor down-trodden denisens "
tn rural districts" he says, who"
he says, will have to leave
Their shinin fields iv golden grain
'All waitin for tn sickle bright,
and go to the poles, If they want to
vote, which, he says, they wont do
if it rains, for" he says, they know
enough to come in out iv the wet, /
was raised on farm mesilf," he says,
"and know what am talking about
(Applause)
Thin think Nv the candy-dates.
why" he says, tits outragus and
scandlus tn trials and troubles they
will have if We pass this bill. Well
suppose a farmer frind iv moline is
weary iv milking COWS and feedin pigs
and wants to be sheriff and move into
the 'tramps' paradise, he'd have to
git forty eight min to sign his paa-
peres befure he cud start in the race,
he says. "and maybe he cuddent git
thin" he says, land If he did twould
cost him good money" he says, land
he moight lose. know how it goes
mesilf. I've spint money IN campaigns
and lost" he says, land now" he
says, we'll suppose quite and I'M
assumin man loike mesilf, who
wouldn't attimpt to run for Office
under a primery lection, wants to be
a governor iv this great state, all he's
got to do is to say to his frind Jeffris
or some other modest man, as the
case may be. come up to the convin-
ton in Milwaukee and nominate me
for governor" 81 wud' says the
modest man. "but me frinds in tn
county convintion may vote for me to
stay at home" 'That makes no diff
ference" says the candy under
tn hr-rand and munificent rules iv
conyinlicns tn vote Nv tn people don't
count. ia git We in on a proxy" he
says, "and tn modest man goes to
Milwaukee and dominates the quite
and unassumin man"
"And now gintlemen." he saws, ",n
closin l wish to call your attintion to
tn fact that tn people don't want pri-
merry 'lections. in fact there is only
wan man in the statef iv Wisconsin
that's in favor iv this bin. and" he
says. hes me bosum frind. | love