The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1901-09-06

gas towns there is no such word as
| salt water.
Some young man who has plenty of
love can secure cottage to store it |
in at Cnanute for just 81, 800.
When Charles Vinegar welded at |
Eldorado all went we'll save that the |
mother of Vinegar was sour on the |
bride.
There are great many people who
will agree to eat all the potatoes
Anna Diggs in her truck patch near
Topeka.
1t is rumored that that fine new jail |
Fort Scott is building will soon be |
filed with preachers who testify against
iointists.
The Topeka Capital predicts more
frost on pumpkins this fall than ever.
Why? Because there will be more
pumpkins.
Pauline Lewelling, daughter of ex-
Governor Lewelling, has married Jas.
A. Dewitt, young lawyer of Oska-
lOosa, Iowa.
The Philippsburg Dispatch says:
! Bud Weiser and his cousin Ann Heiser
arrived today and were greeted by
numerous friends.
Arkansas City has hopes of sugar
beet factory. The channel of the late
Arkansas river is said to afford ex-
cellent beet ground.
If "money is the root of all evil" il
ought to be good crop for arid Kan
sas, for that root stands dry weather
better than any other.
Fort Scott wants to drill for gas
but is afraid of getting salt water
hole, since there has been so much talk
of her being like Sodom.
A man who sells Swift's meats
whipped the town bully of Thayer for
swearing before a lady, and did
bully good job of it, too.
Knowing that Kansans are scrappers
until they die Uncle Sam sent a re-
cruiting officer to the old soldiers re-
union at Baxter Springs.
Amid the press of other business the
Topeka Herald hashad time to discov-
er the great truth that l234567S9 times
3 plus equals 9S76j432l.
Three men in two days hunt near
HAYS City bagged 80 prairie chickens.
Being wise they had a picture AIKEN
Of themselves and birds.
The Winfield Courier SAYS the rea
son Kiping is writing such bad poet
try is in the hope of lowering himself
to the size of the laureatship.
When discussing anti-expanson re-
member that the taXiblewealth of Kan
sas today is seventy times the price
paid for the Louisiana purchase.
A meteor passed over score of
eastern Kansas towns and was heard
only in Lawrence. y thought is as
noisy as II stage whisper in Lawrence.
The only Kansan so far who has
sided in the sampson Schley row is
I Congressman Curtis, who in a speech
at Belleville, says Schley did the bust
ness.
It's a dirty, in drouth that does no
body good. \ Salina drunk fell into
lying ON his back in three inches of
water
When Galena society women decide
to "cut an acquaintance they do not
rely on iIigid stare but resort to
q butcher knife. 1t is far more
effective.
For years Cotfeyville has sought
some excuse for looking down on In
dependence, and the electric railway
survey shows it is Il feet higher than
its rival.
The first automobile is about to be
turned out of that Cherryvale factory.
If it will run as fast as some of the re-
ports told of it, the machine is a howl
ing success
Samuel Proctor of Edwards county,
while on his way to the Hutchinson re.
union was injured and lost his arm.
The Santa Fe gave him and his wife
each 81 600.
In Kansas convict cannot make
civil contract. a convict went to Mis-
souri, recently on leave and married.
Now the question is up as to whether
he is or isn't.
Rev. Sheldon says that what's need
ed in domestic life is more love be-
tween the servant girl and her employ
err. The wife of the employer will now
take the stand.
With all her metropolitan airs Par
| SOuS SUN SldItS ub lIt IlClls ~
stranger sitting on the curb and
munching wisp of hay drew quite
crowd the other day.
Another attempt is to be made to get
John Collins out of the pen. If the
reports of his exemplary life are true
it would be wicked to let him out into
this sinful world.
DR.. Wylie Woodruff, who deser ed
his wife ana fled to Oregon is crack
wrestler on the side, but he seems TO
have gotten worse than dog fall in
his bout with old Satan.
One of The departments in the Con-
cordia Press is entitled: "Piazza
Chat" For genuine comedies and
tragedies. Back Stoop News"
would back it off the track.
A Galena Times reporter weeps wet,
hot water because of the fact that a