Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1901-10-26

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s - Tea able Salad. =
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sportsmal-''Is the hunting good here.
Native-"Yep; the huntin's bette-
the fndin'.'-Judge. '' nor
This must be the straw thar b,.,.
the camefs back" remarked the sf,f etoAe
from insomnia, as he tossed on rho -
ing-house mattress.-Philadelph Re S",J-
An Omission.-''She declares thot sh,
is single from choice" said Miss KRIS
But did she say whose choiceY" ostai
Miss Frocks.-Detroit Free Press
Bill, can yer lend me twopenceg,
''Wot a silly question ter arsti WbT -
| 'ad twopence, wot 'ud | be dom sto15 4
in outside public 'ouseY'-Punch.
He-"I told your father frankly
couldn't support you"
She-"What did he say?"
He-"Hc said that he had the san,a
experience. ILLUSTRATED Bits.
Mamma-"You know. johnny who,
mamma whips her little boy she 65es #
JohnnS~Si wish ,i sodi.. . tAitdtaiii eins
quite so much of me."-Tit- Bits.
A Soft Answer.-She-"Wen dear
after that you must acknowledge ~
you are a foolp' He-''I always knew !,
darling; but-until I married you--i
managed to keep it a secret."-Life
Teddy-"I wish hadn't licked jimmy
Brown this morning" Mamma-''Y N
see how wrong it was. don't you, dear9''
Teddy-"Yes, cause l didn't know III
noon that he was going to give party"
-Tit-Bts.
Sub-Editor-'I like the style of tbis
writer; his story has quite swing to
it,"
Editor-"Then we'd better publish If
with our hammock literature Tie
Smart Set.
Street Evangelist stepping into drug
storey oung man, have you got r.
ligion?"
Drug Store Salesman-s'No. sir: bu.
we have something just as good"-Chi-
cago Tribune.
Her Mother-'I saw HIM kiss you. I
am terribly shocked l did not for =
such liberty" Herself-"Nor did |.
ma. In fact, bet him a pair of gloves
he darent! '-Tit-Bits.
The other night George AIDE met an
Indiana woman who asked him if he had
ever noticed how many bright people
come from Indiana. Yes he replied,
land the brighter they are the quicker
they come. dramatic Mirror.
Hello. What's your hurry?" I'm
going out TO Subburbhurst to look at a
piece Of property. real estate man
wants to sell me-" 'Ah! Want to see
how the land lies, eh?' Yves; also how
the land agent lies. "-Philadelphia Press.
Mrs. hnowles-"That is a beautiful
recommendation you gave to your COOK
OF course she deserved it?" Mrs. Nil
ton-"Of course" But what do you
really think about the girl? | have writ
| ten recommendations myself, you know"
Boston Transcript.
Il saw Mrs. X. going in an auction
sale last Monday. Isn't her craze for
bargains extraordinary Eyes, indeed.
/ believe that she could die happy If she
knew that she would be laid out on
bargain counter and buried as a rem.
nant."-Town and Country.
No Need of Prayer.-Deacon Ebony
II hab not seen you at ouah revival meet
| ms. Mistah Black"
Mistah Black-"Wot fob want OBJ re.
viyal meetin'sY'
Don't you ebber pray?"
mo: L carry er rabbits foot. New
York Weekly.
The Way Cook Put -Wife-"WeI,
John, I'll have to do the cooking now.
The cook left without warning this afte--
! noon" Husband-"Not exactly without
warning. She told me this morning |
! had better bring home some dyspepsia
| tablets tonight, but l didn't quite catch
on % what she meant. Judge.
| Judkins-"Come now, do you think
there. is ever time when homicide is
| justifabe?"
Batkins-"Wel 1 wouldn't say there
is; but it comes pretty near it when the
| dentist jabS a bare nerve with his prong
! and asks yOu in that eXaSperating way
Of his if you felt it.''-Boston Transcript.
admirably practical remarks the
Kansas City Journal, lis the NodaWay
county seminary girl who won an acety..
| lene gas machine which was ratified of
| by the manufacturers at the Maryvllc
| street fair the other day. Said she,
when informed that she held the lucky
number, Well, I'll just use that TO spark
| by"
"Plaze, SIR" said an Irishman to a
| traveller, would yez be so Obloiging as
to take me great coat here to Liverpool
wild yez?'
Yes said the man in the wagon,
but how will you get it again." =.
"Oh. that's mighty aisy. so it IS.
| said Pat, for. sure. I'll remain inside
| NV it.''-Tit- Bits
WARD M'ALLISTER'S BROTHER.