Evening star., 1901-06-08
TOO MUCH FOR HIS FATHER


his dad the other evening after dinner, wher
his father was Wen INTO the study Of the
batting averagestof thealecal nine, "can YOU
tell me the names Of the first six Saxon
kings of England? And the most importan,
battles each of them faught?'
Mr.. Nextdoor dropped the evening paper
into his lap andb looked the feurteen-year-
old over critically
NO. he said ttp himself, IT couldn't for
million dollars, any more than / could
beat my Chink laundryman playing fan-tan
or cooking dope pills.
"Er-who wants to. know that, Tommy p
he inquired aloud
Tommy. ~ -,
"oh, it is?'' said his. dad. picking up his
paper We'll, it wouldn't be fair for me to
tell you, then. Just run over that history
book some more and you'll find out"
Tommy was silent for a while. during
which time Mr.. Nextdoor was shaking his
head sadly behind the paper over the unac-
countably poor batting averages of couple
of of his favorites on the Washington nine.
Then Tommy broke the silence again.
Paw, he inquired, scratching his head,
what was the name of the great Norman
king of England who was the son of Swe-
gen, and what year did William the Con-
querer win the battle of Senlac, and who
was the greatest ecclesiastical statesman OF
England after Dunstan and Anslem, and
were Hengist and Horsa blood kin?'
Again MI Nextdoor permitted his paper
to drop into his lap, while he stared at his
son and heir over his glasses.
Look a-here, boy he said to Tommy.
why don't you study your lessons right
and learn those things, instead of asking
me about emp
"'Oh. know the answers. pa" cheerfully
replied Tommy, grinning. I'm only asking
you the questions out loud SOS they'll stick
in my mind when you reply to 'em and l
won't forget EN-.
''Oh, that's it. is it?" said Mr.. Nextdoor.
again picking up his paper. We'll. those
are too easy. It's only the hard ones that
I've got time to answer" and then he fixed
his eye on the base-hit column, hoping that
some boy out in front of the house would
whistle for Tommy real soon. There was
no whistle for Tommy, however. and after
another silence Tommy broke in again.
Paw" he said, this is not such hard
one for you, but found it hard at first.
Describe, the course of the ancient river
Euphrates."
Il will not" replied Mr.. Nextdoor. with
some asperity. What do you go to school
for if not to learn such simple things as
that? Why, l knew the answer to that
when was eight years DID," and Mr.. Next
door breathed silent prayer that he would
be forgiven for his sins.
"Oh, paw broke in Tommy after an
other silence. you've been in the Treasury
Department so long that you know ALI
about money and things like that, don't
you?"
well; just a few-just few" remarked
Mr. Nextdoor complacently, for he felt that
at last the youngster had landed on terri
tory with which he was familiar. What
do you want to find out?"
"Oh, it's just a little mental arithmetic
question, that's ALL, said Tommy
well. shoot it out. son." put in Mr..
Nextdoor. feeling measurably safe.
What is the interest on s19,457S4 for
six years. eight months and twenty-seven
days at six and two-fifths per cent? in
quired Tommy. fixing his dad with his eye.
Mr.. Nextdoor ficked the ash from his
cigar savagely.
''Who ever told you that that was mental
arithmetic?" he said to the boy. "Any
teacher that tells you that that kind of
thing is mental arithmetic is crazy. Don't
you believe it. That's problem in interest
that it would take Secretary Gage himself
about half hour to work OUT
We'll, then, paw" said Tommy. not to
be downed, "heres another one of those
treasury things. What was the national
debt of the United States in 1859, just be-
fore the outbreak of the civil war;"
"D'ye want that in round numbers?"
asked Tommy's dad desperately.
Yes" said Tommy. y
We'll, I'll tell you tomorrow evening, af-
ter I've had a chance to think it over and
make few mental calculations" replied
Mr.. Nextdoor. figuring on getting hold of
th2 information at the department on the
following day. p
Then Mr.. Nextdoor pretended that he
heard stray dog running over the flower
garden in the front yard. and rushed out,
saying to Tommy as he went out the front
door, run upstairs and ask your mother
a few"
Which Tommy did, to his mothers in
tense misery and modification, for about
three-quarters of an hour.
IT'S too bad that boy of ours isn't about
five years older" said Mr. Nextdoor to Mrs
Nextdoor, when they had retired that
night
Why" inquired Mrs Nextdoor.
"Why?" echoed Mr. Nextdoor. Just
look at the examination he'd be able to
pass for a $3.50 billet in the seed division
or even for s720 job as a computer in the
census Officer