New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1901-05-22
HAD A KICK TO MAKE
AND HE MADEIT RIGHT TO THE HEAD
OF THE FIRM.

The Kicker Went About Landing His
Protest In Rather unconventional
Manner, but the Chances Are He
Got What He Was After
& eyes, said the tail, loose jeinted
man at the telephone. that the mum
Der want-e29 =
Double two nine2' queried the
voice at the central office
"WeH, I don't know that double two
nine is any better than the plain. or
binary two, two, nine. but if you insist
on that style suppose we say double
two single nine and get it exactly right
Hellol Is that Spotcash & Co. ST.
Eyes, : responded the voice at the
other end of the wire
is Mr.. Spotcash in?
'sIs it something important? He is
much occupied.
SO am I. Yes; lisa matter of some
Importance, and I want to talk to Mr.
Spotcash, personally Yes; I'll hold the
wire that is, I'll hold the phone
"Hellol" snapped somebody at this
iuncture.
"Hellol Is that Mr.. Spotcash p
eyes. Who is it,"
'tYou are the head of the firm of
Spotcash & Co., are you not p
Yes, = was the impatient answer
What do you want? Who are your
''Gwilliams, 1895 Pumpernickel
street. Z want to enter complaint =
"What about? p
Il bought an icebox at your store
few days ago, and
''Call up the household goods depart
ment, confound you'll l have no time to
spare to look after such things. :.
You've got as much time, perhaps
as have 1 haven't any complaint to
make to the household goods depart
ment. The head of the firm is the man
I want to talk to. | bought an icebox
at your store few days ago for .$16.75.
I might have got it cheaper somewhere
else, but that ism t the point. Having
bought it and paid for it. had right
to expect it to be delivered within a
reasonable time and in fair condition
It didn't come for four days. and when
it did GOMEZ
''Say, you, employ men to hear
complaints of this kind
Il have no use for them. You're the
responsible man of the house. The sys-
TEN is yours IF it doesn t work smooth
~, it is your fault. When that icebox
came four days after purchase. one of
the castors was missing, bi,e varnish
was scraped off the outside surface in
more than a dozen places. and it looked
as if it had gone through a hard season
at a cheap boarding house"
If there's anything wrong with it,
roared Mr.. Spotcash. ''send it backl /
can't take up my tim" -
Stand a little farther away from
the phone, Mr.. Spotcash Your voice
sounds as if you had your mouth full
of mashed potatoes
"Who the devil are You p
~ think gave you my name and
address Civilians, Il 95 Pumpernickel
street, next door to Lazarus j. Spill
horn. You don't know me from
stuffed alligator, but you may have
heard of Spillhorn. Don't you allow
yourself to get hot. Mr.. Spotcash, over
an icebox. The incongruity>of such a
thing ought to be apparent even to the
head Of an overgrown junkshop''
''If you were here, sir. | should kick
you out of my Office -
You would probably need some help
If that icebox had simply been defaced
a little, shouldn't have made any fuss
about it. but the stupid ass you sent to
deliver it
Haven't you sense enough. you in.
fernal idiot. to know that don't look
personally after the little details of a
business amounting to millions of dol
lars year ~
.sIf you don't grasp every detail OF
that business, you Cheap John notion
peddler in a gilt binding, you are not
fit to be the boss of it'll Don't try to
crawl out Of the responsibility by
throwing the blame on some boy If
that icebox had simply been defaced a
little, repeat. shouldn't have made
any fuss about it, but the fellow you
sent to deliver it didn't have any more
sense than to tumble it on the side
walk
Bring it back. blank you"
Look here, Spotcash, that won t do.
you know. You are not allowed to talk
in that style over the telephone Exer-
else a little common sense, Spotcasll.
You know it isn't my place to bring
that icebox back The proper thing to
do, you thirty third degree haberdasher
and toy vendor, is to send me new
icebox and take the damaged one
back
you blank fool, do you think you
can tell me -
Again let me tell you, Spotcash.
not to use such language over the tele-
phone. Some remote ancestor of yours
may possibly have been a gentleman.
Try to emulate him, Spotcash In the
meantime please accept the assurances
Of my distinguished consideration, and
the icebox will remain in my dwelling
subject to your order If it is replaced
properly and within reasonable time,
you will not hear from me again. IF it