The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1901-10-26

a member of congress, and a host of
Barkises; any quantity of politicians
in and out of a job; men who are al
ways busy, and a few who rest good
deal of the time; men of many kinds of
religion; none, however, of those who
are known as fire (water) wOrShiperS;
several prohibitionists-not many, how
ever, but Few, now and then one;
some who admire Mrs. Nation, and 9th
erS who do not; actors, lot of them;
singers, too numerous to mention, and,
sometimes, for comfort; few each Of
PreSbyterianS, BaptiStS, EpiScOpalianS,
Roman Catholics, Quakers, Jews, Gen
tiles; in short we have the most cos
mopolitan and heterogeneous aggrega-
ton ever gathered together in one drove,
all dwelling together in peace and har-
mOny, and no member of our lodge has
ever been sent to the penitentiary, the
insane asylum or the home for the
feeble-minded, and a good many of our
richest members have very little trou-
BILE in getting credit at the butcher
shops and bakeries of our city.
One man is as good as another in the
ElkS, except as one may excel another
in doing good or loving the beautiful
The only dungeon we have in our quar-
tiers is for the Incarceration of members
who whip their wives, or argue politics
or religion about US. They think We
will average up pretty well with the
general run of humanity; but some of
them have an idea that we are behind
all sorts of schemes to make life misera-
and who behave as becomes decent and
respectable citizens; that we father all
schemes for keeping those who have
fallen by the wayside from regaining
their feet; that we have a committee
out every night for the purpose of steal
ing coal from widows and orphans; that
when importuned for bread we always
tender a stone; that we are everlasting
ly scrapping with our neighborS; that
We poke our noses into other peoples
AFFAIRS merely to be doing something;
that, in short, we are about the worst
lot of mOrtalS that ever crossed the Mis-
souri, river, and that we never have a
serious thought or do anything to make
life brighter or happier for any of Gods
children. Our lodge is made up of a
men of our city. men who do not believe
that in order to lead an upright and
noble life it is necessary to forego all
innocent recreations and amusements,
or smother the social instinct which
tends to bring US into closer communion
and cement more firmly the ties of
friendship and fraternal love. Look over
the list of our membership and if you
think we are a lot of trampS and no.
boes. you have another guess coming.
You are different from the boy spoken
OF in Deuteronomy, who is said to have
guessed right the very first time
But, as we were saying before, we
really don't know how long the war in
South Africa will last, but that don't
bother US any more than the bear fight
did the woman. What. never heard of
it, Well, that is funny, for it is a reg
ular old chestnut. But here it is. A
poor woman was strolling through the
woods in search of her husband, who
had been out all night sitting up with
a sick FRIEND or attending some ones
birthday party-at least she didn't know
where the blessed man was. She unex-
peetedly came upon him in a heated