Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-06-23

Olson IN Mcpherson, an lave us have
tn law on him.
Il don't suppose, Hinnissy, I ought to
be gettin' off me little JOKES on a seery-
GUS matther like this. What's it all
about, says We? Well, We see, It's this
way. Wanst befure tn war some la-ad
firm this country took a bSat acrost
tn Atlantic and runs it again an Eng
lish boat, an iv coorse, he won, rot
bein' tied to tn dock, an they give
him a Cup. don't know why they give
him a cup, but they give him 4 cup.
He brought it back here, an handed
it to a yacht club which is an assocy-
alton, Hinnissy, iv Numbers iv tn Bar.
He says: 'Ye keep that cup on ye'er
mantle-piece an if e'er an Englishman
wants it, don't we give it to him. At
Their awhile, an Englishman tat owned
a boat came afther tn cup, an twas
lave go altogether an tn las mar to
tn line knows what he is. He's an
Englishman, iv coorse. That was all
Fright too. But tn time come whin tn
lagal profession took a hand in tn
game. Look here, : says they. we've
vilated nearly all tn stances " tn State
iv Moo Jersey already they says. So
they took TIL matther in hand an dhrew
up tn Fright pa-apers. State iv Moo
York, County Nv Cook, s. S. Know all
men by these prisints. To all magis-
thrates an polls officers, greetin'. In
re Sir Upton again tn Cup. Ordered
that if Sir Upton shall secure said Cup
firm aforesaid (Which he WON'T he
must build a boat as follows: Wun
hundred an twinty chest, fifty-four
waist, hip an side pockets, carryin
three hundred an sixty-three thous-
an cubic feet iy canvas; tn basement
iv tn BOAT to be papered in green with
yellow Powered dado, open plunOtn
steam heat throughout, tn tinant to
pay all repairs. Be mains Nv this in
fernal machine. if enable to kill off tn
rile family, he will attimpt to cross tn
stormy Atlantic an if successful. will
arrive at tn risidince iv tn party of tn
first part said John Doe. Wanst there,
he will consult with Numbers iv tn Moo
York Bar Association, who will lead
him to a firm iv competent expert &C
countants, who will give him his time
which is two minyits measured be tn
invarse ratio iv tn distance firm tn
pinnacle to tn cook-stove, an firm tn
cook-stove east be north to tn bowsprlt
He will thin take his foolish boat down
tn bay, an if he keeps his health. he
can rayturn to tn grocery business fr
he's a jolly good fellow which nobody
can deny"
Eye can see this, Hinnissy, that
yachtin' has become wan iv tn larned
professions. IT'S that that got thla-ad
firm Boston into it. They's a jolly Jack
Tar FIR We. In dhrawin' up a lease or
framin' a bond, no more gallant sailor
rides tn waves. thin hearty Jack Lar
sen iv tn A~malgamated Copper Yacht
Club. What no, says he, IF we're goin'
to have a race he says 'Shiyer me tim
bers il / don't look up tn law ne
SAYS. So he become a yachtsman. But,
saws tn Moo York la-ads, thin that has
tn Cup on their mantle-piece. Ie can
race only on two conditions. What
ARE they? ? says Larsen. TIL first IS
that We become a mimber iv our club
With pleasure says he. Ye can't,
saws they. An hayin' complied with
this first condition, We must give rs yeer
boat says they. We don't want IT,
they says TIL terms suit ms entire
" says Cap. Larsen I'm a simple
sailor man an I'll give We me boat un-
der tn following conditions. he says.
First, that We won't take it; second.
that yell paint me name on tn side
iv it in red letters, three feet high;
third. that yen inthrajooce me to tn
Prince iv Wales; foorth, that I'll sail it
mesilf. Nawthfn',s he says 'uud give
me greater pleasure thin to hare me
<~~E.a-A awBSAv6fwo{w w&Gk - 81