davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04
The Marriage Question.

Mrs. Benham-Not one woman In q
thousand marries the man she wants.
Benham-She doesn't want to marry
the man she wants; she wants to mar-
rys thesm man some other woman wants.
London Tit Bits.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04
Proper Place forsIt,

Customer-See here, waitera found
a button in this salad. rs
Waiter-Yes, sir; that's part of the
dressing ng.-Philadelphia Record
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04

The capitalist colored when we spoke
of the check that hung in a neat frame
over his desk. s.t -
"a bit Of sentfmentaAsmn n'ssaid he.
'Trhe first billion I ever NADER
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04
More Space REQUIRED,

Mr.. Gooph-When die, don't want
anything but the truth about me carv-
ed on my tombstone.
Mrs. Geoph-I am afraid we will
have to put up stone WALL then. in
stead of a monument. Baltimore
American.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04
Gems.

Clerk-This cook is described as a
jewel, although bit set In her way.
Housekeeper-Have you no-er-
loose jewels?
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04
Beyond Recall.

"We never remember the faces Of
those we love most dearly"
sThats so. To save me 1 can't tell
what hundred-dollar bill looks like"
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04

The ii hipwhih NJ d to sD ~ in iris is gt o fI ( work knd
experiment the part h o n IS was kept
roousn unit wasrady sal herewith p from hof ship
he b the invent rlaH Hye iey III in IN z" z" "a D mnt
p b en-
cylinder reservoirs ~~ a aa
bf ft nc hg for many years lie
apradoda nauadbas hda log experience booi e
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04

Mrs. Gaswell-The Gear of Russia
now has four daughters.
Mr.. Gaswell-Oh, the dear little Gar
dlnesLPittsburg Chronicle Telegraph.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04

"Are there, indeed, so many eligible
young women in American asked the
count.
"There are countless thousands!" re-
piled the other
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04
Not for Him:

GeneraLStop that reporters
Aid-What! Don't you want to have
him send home an account of your
heroism?
mo. l don't want to be an Ameri-
can hero for a week and a punching
bag for>the rest Of my life,n-Life.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04

Some dogs can be taught to stand OF
two legs and beg just like a man.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04

Fate surely must be something Of wag-
Some favors that she sends us come Zig
gag.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04
He.e.ty Paw.

Jim-Honesty is ther best policy arter
all.
Bili-How? ste9
Remember the dog 1 stolea" -
"Yep."
"Well. tried two hull days to sell
i'm, an no one offered more'n dollar.
So I went. like honest man. an guv
him to tn ole lady what owned i'm.
an she guv me $5."-New York Week
lx-
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04
MedicaI Asai.tauee.

Specialist-Your nerves are affected;
you need exercise; walk to business ev-
cry day.
Sick Mani do walk to business ev-
cry day.
Specialist-You do? Well. you ought
to have more sense-that's what ails
you-overstrain. Now. behave yourself
nationally and ride every day|$10.
please.-Chicago Record Herald.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04
The Bean, and the Mote.

cuse for a man who goes fishing on
Sunday.
Miss Cleek-Not In these days, at any
rate, when there are SO many opportu
mites to play golf.--Puck.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04
The Crowded Front Row.

Scribbs-You used to have some lit
erary ambition.
Stubs-Yes, years ago; but fame is
SO common now that / wouldn't have
IT.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04

District yisitor-But, Mrs. Brown,
haven't you had doctor? -.
Mrs. Brown-No. ma'am; my 'usband
e don't 'old with no doctors. E says.
says 'e, as I'd better die natural
death.-Moonshine.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04
A Real B.nefactor.

MY dear doctor, cannot thank you
enough for performing that operation
on my uncle
Il did the best l could
81 know it, know it. BY his death
two whole families are now living in
comparative ease. Judge.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04
No Legal Redress.

More than half the pickpockets are
women"
soh, come now; that pretty severe
"But it's true. The only reason they
escape arrest is because they don't pick
anybody's pockets but Their husbands
philadelphia Bulletin.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04
Saving Money

Mr.. Hardhead-I saved big pile Of
money to-day.
Mrs. H.-That is lovely! Howl
Mr.. H.-Instead Of suing man for
what he owed me let him have it,
New York Weekly.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04
No Appearance. to Keen ~.

no Appearances TO Keep Ob.
Didn't you go away at all, Mrs.
Dash?"
No; Mr. Dash said he was so we'll
fixed now that We could afford to stay
at home Il. we wanted to-so We did"
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1901-10-04
A Fine Imitation.
True Resignation


The Spinster ian invalid)-Is it really
true that marriages are made in heav-
en-?
The Parson-Yes. l believe SO.
The Spinster resignedly)-Oh, then
I'll tell the doctor he needn't call again.
Chicago News.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1901-05-30
SECRET SOCIETIES.
The United Presbyterian General
Assembly Attacks the MasOns
and Odd Fellows.

Des Moines, Ia. May 25.-The one
important topic before the United
Presbyterian general assembly was
revision of the creed. which provides
that no member of any secret society
can be a member of the church. The
matter was hotly discussed for more
than two hours, but final decision
was postponed until later in the ses-
sion. The masonic and odd fellows
orders were special objects of attack.
one delegate going so far as to say
he believed no member of secret
society could ever reach heaven. DIR.
James Grove of Philadelphia, was
particularly bitter against the ma
sonic order, and called the exercises
of the lodges ''worshipping without
Christ" Rev. J. NJ. Wallace thought
some members of some societies
might be- admitted to the church, but
wished to exclude masons. DR.. Nc
Millen thought fraternalism, taught
by secret societies was anti-Chris-
tian. Rev. r. E. Motfatt, of New York,
said no man could be both a mason
or an odd fellow and Christian.
Rev. +. X. Smith, the only colored
delegate, thought secret societies
were wrong because they compelled
a man to keep a secret from his wife,
which was contrary to the Bible
teachings.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1901-05-30
EX-GOV. TANNER DEAD.
Death Probably Due to q Blood Clot
or Rupture of a Blood Vessel in
the Brain.

Springfield, ILL.,, May 24.-An after
noon paper intimated that former
Gov. Tanner had committed suicide,
but DR.. Dixon stated positively
Thursday night that although he was
unable to state the absolute and real
cause Of death, he would unhesitating-
ly say that death was due to natural
causes, his opinion being that death
WAS due to cerebral blood clot. or
rupture of blood vessel in the brain.
Springfield, ILL.,, May 27.-In the
beauty of a perfect May day and
with all the pomp and circumstance
of a military funeral and rites of the
church, former Gov. Tanner was
buried in Oak Ridge cemetery Sum
day afternoon almost within the
shadow of the national Lincoln mon
ument. The casket was draped with
an American flag and was covered
with flowers. When It had been low
cred into the grave the 5th infantry,
Illinois national guard, fred three
volleys and TAPS" was sounded. The
'uneral was the largest seen in Spriag.
field since the burial of President
Lincoln in April, 1865.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1901-05-30
OHIO MOTHERS.
An Old Eeud Was Revived When
Mrs, Edgar NJ. Hatton Wns !.
Elected as President.

Columbus, o., May 24.-The Ohio
women, assembled incidentally to the
National Congress Of Mothers, have
had big row. Mrs. Edgar NJ. Hat
ton. of Columbus, was an active can
didate for the first vice presidency
of the Ohio congress. She had been
candidate at the Marietta conven-
ton for the presidency of the Ohio
Federation of Women's clubs, but was
defeated by Mrs. James II. Hopley,
Columbus. Mrs. Hatton refused to
lead movement for reception to
Mrs. Hopley by her townswomen and
feud was born.
The Hopley faction Thursday
sought to even up the score. They
opposed Mrs. Hatton ostensibly on
the ground that she was not mother
After long wrangle Mrs. Hatton
was elected. The Hopley faction OBJ
jectcd to a motion to make the cleo
ton unanimous. Finally Mrs. Fred
erick Schoff, of Philadelphia, took up
the role of peacenaker. She said
she was ashamed of Ohio. She
thought the newborn baby of the
congress deserved a spanking.
Then she moved that to atone for
the wrangle the convention go into
silent prayer for three minutes
This was done. and Immediately up
on the conclusion of the season OF
prayer, Mrs. Hatton left the hall, and
refused to take up the gavel.
The delegates then began all over
again, and elected Mrs. j. A. JEFF
frey, of Columbus. president. The
following were then elected as vice
presidents: Mrs. Z. NJ. Sears, of Bu-
cyrus; Mrs. Mary Hutcheson, of CO.
lumbus, and Mrs. S. NJ. Perkins, of
Cleveland.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1901-05-30
HOMEWARD BOUND.
the Return Journey From San
FranciscO Saturday.

San Francisco, May 25.-President
Mckinley has completed his pro.
gramme in this city, having met every
organization included in the original
schedule, and Mrs. McKinley's health
has so far improved that the presi-
dent and his party began the return
journey to the national capital at
10 a. m. Saturday.
The presidents public functions in.
cluded reception at the Scott resi-
dence to the members of the foreign
consular representatives of this city,
a reception at the Palace hotel by
the Sons and Daughters of the Amer.
lean Revolution and the Loyal Legion
in honor of the president, and re-
view of the school children of Oak.
land by the president.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1901-05-30
While Racing for a Switch Two
Electric Cars Came Together
at Albany, N. Y.
WERE GOING FORTY NILES AN HOUR
Over Forty Prominent People We're
Injured, Some Fatally and Others
Seriously, by the Collision.
Men With Broken Arms, DislocateA
Joints and Bloody Heads Tried
to Assist Others Who Were
More Helpless.

Albany, N. Y, May 27.-Electric
cars racing for switch while rum
ming in opposite directions at the rate
of 40 miles an hour cost five lives
Sunday afternoon by terrific col
lision in which over 40 prominent
people were injured, some fatally
and Others seriously. .. .. e..
The lobby of the local post office
filed with dead and wounded, hys-
terical women and children looking
for relatives and friends, surgeons
administering temporary relief, and
ambulances racing through the city,
taking the wounded to the hospital,
were the early intimations of the
accident.
The scene of the accident was a
point about two miles out of Green
bush, on the line of the Albany and
Hudson railway. The point where
the cars met on the single track was
at a sharp curve. and so fast were
both running, and so sudden was
the collision, that the motorman
never had time to put on the brakes
before south bound car No. 22 had
gone almost clean through north
bound car No. II, and hung on the
edge of a high cliff, with it's load
of shrieking, manned humanity.
One motorman was pinioned up
against the smashed front of the
south-bound car, with both legs sew
cred and killed instantly, while the
other one lived but few minutes.
Fully 100 men, women and children
formed a struggling, shrieking pyr-
amid, mixed with blood, detached por-
tions of human bodies and the wreck
age of the cars.
Some of the more slightly injured
of the men extricated themselves,
and began to pull people out of the
rear ends of the two cars, and al
most every one was taken out in this
way and nearly all were badly in
jured.
The few women and children who
had escaped injury and death We're
hysterical and added their cries to
the shrieks of the dying and mutil-
ated. Men with broken arms and
bones, dislocated joints and bloody
heads and faces tried to assist others
who We're more helpless.
Help had been summoned from East
Greenbush and vicinity, and in a little
time the bruised mass of humanity,
with the mutilated dead for grue-
some and silent company, We're load
ed on extra cars and taken to Albany.
There ambulances and physicians had
been summoned and the post office
turned into morgue and hospital.
AS fast as the physicians could tenn
porarily fix up the wounded they
were taken to their homes or to the
hospitals.
With both motormen killed, it was
hard to get at the real cause of the
accident, but it is pretty well de-
termined that it was caused by an
attempt of the south-bound car to
reach a second switch instead of wait
ing for the north-bound car at the
first siding.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1901-05-30

nfsay Leading Pressyss1an Disinss Give
Their n4assSs why . ChAngs
Unlould Ds nIade. 9

Philadelphia, May 25.-The Presby.
terrain general assembly, by vote
which showed conclusively that a re.
vision Of the confession of faith il
desired by the church, defeated the
amendment dismissing the whole sub.
ject offered by DR.. George D. Baker
of Philadelphia. The Assembly de.
cided by an overwhelming majority
to continue consideration of the great
question after two days Of debate,
during which leading exponents OF
the Presbyterian doctrine throughout
the country thoroughly analysed the
creed and gave their reasons for their
positions regarding the subject. AT
the opening of the afternoons ses-
sion the assembly decided to vote
on the amendment at 4:3O o'clock,
and speeches were limited to ten min.
utes. The time, however, was extend.
ed In order TO give number of com.
missioners who wished 70 be heard
an opportunity of speaking.
The principal addresses Of the day
were made by Rev. DR.. John Dewitt
in the morning, and Rev. DR.. Charles
A. Dickey, who closed the debate.
DIR. Dewitt favored dismissal, declar-
ing that though there might be slight
divergence of opinion on the confes-
sion, the church was united on the
Word Of God.
DR.. Dickey took decided stand
against dismissal. He said as the
question of revision was not before
the assembly no evil could result f. ON
further consideration of the COM
rnittee's report.
DR.. W. Fl. Roberts made a rlca ;or
declarative statement asserting he
supremacy of Holy Scripture as the
only source of doctrine; that the sys-
tenn of the confession is the same
as Holy Scripture teaches, and that
infants are saved by Gods electing
grace.
The discussion at times was lively
but without bitterness.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1901-05-30
CLAIMS he WAS MURDERED.
Mrs. Bresci, Wife of the Assassin OF
King Humbert, Maintains He
Did Not Suicide.

Rome, May 23.-The assassin of the
late King Humbert committed sui
eide at the penitentiary at Santsary
Thursday morning.
New York, May 24.-Seen at her
home in Hoboken, N. j., late Thurs
day, Mrs. Bresci maintained that
Bresci, the assassin of King Hnmbert,
did not commit suicide. "He was
murdered" she said, repeating the
words again and again.
81 had a letter from him one week
ago." she said. "He was allowed to
write one letter every four months.
He told me of his treatment. He was
kept in a cell out in the rocks down
under the water level, and they did
everything to make him insane so
he would kill himself, but they would
never succeed in making him do that.
He may have been insane, probably
he was"
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1901-05-30
oHyo ODD PILLOWS.
oraaa Lolee Met II. srrsasAsla-nA-
aowment Fund Fer Maintenance
Of state Home Urged.

Springfield, O.. May 2c.-0rand
Lodge of Ohio, I. o. o. F., convened
here Tuesday, welcoming exercises
being held in the city hall. About
1000 delegates are in attendance.
Grand Master +. L. Hoskins, Of Sid
ney, delivered his annual address, re-
ferring to the remarkable gain In
membership and recommending that
grand Representatives be elected In
each district and required to hold
convention Of all lodges in his dis
trict once n year. aGs .t5p 1suo
Grand Secretary C. Lyman, of Co.
lumbus, urged the estuhlishinent Of
endowment funds for maintenaLcc of
state home.
! The treasurer's report shows the
years receipts $73,5s7.os, disburse-
ments $50,702.06. ,se1t
Springfield, o., May 24.-The grand
lodge of Ohio, Odd Fellows, Thurs
day decided to meet next May in
Marion, o. The Odd Fellows home
endowment fund was increased to
$2,25O Thursday by additional contri-
buttons. A number of changes were
made In the bylaws. ,f sa.
Springfield, O., May 25.--The Ohio
Grand Lodge, Odd Fellows, closed
their session by installing the fol-
lowing officers, which count of the
vote taken during the year from the
several lodges show to have been Sc
lected: Grand master, j. l.. Lowrey,
Van Vert; deputy grand master, J.
NJ. Bever, Fostoria; grand warden.
Charles +. Pavey, Columbus; grand
secretary, c. NJ. Lyman, Columbus;
grand assistant secretary, Ralph p.
Miller, Columbus; grand treasurer,
c. L. Niles. Findlay.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1901-05-30
TIE STRIKING MAcH1Nrsrs.
President o'Connell Recommends 9
Nine Hour Nay On All the
RAILROADS.

Washington, May 24.--President
O'Connell, of the Machinists' associa-
tion, in summarizing the situation
Thursday night, said:
"The situation now shows that we
are largely the gamer in the nun.
Der of settlements made. The ad.
justments reported during the day
show gain in New England of 1,50C
in the number of men returned to
work with the demands granted; OF
500 to 800 in Ohio, and probably 1,ooC
in Pennsylvania. About 1000 men
struck Thursday. There are some
additions in Philadelphia and some
in the Sea Board Air Line shops al
Americus, Ga. Our policy is to dis.
courage bringing out any more men
than is absolutely necessary to effect
the success of the movement"
Washington, May e5.-President
James O'Connell. of the international
Association of Machinists, announced
that he would recommend to the next
annual convention of machinists al
Toronto. beginning June 3, that a
without reduction of wages on ali
the railroads of the country. On
railroads which fail to comply with
this demand, strike will be ordered
This recommendation will be made
in Mr.. O'Connell's annual report.
Mr.. O'Connell says that such a strike
would involve probably 100000 men,
including 10000 machinists, the others
being boiler makers, pattern makers
and semi-skilled workmen who work
with the machinists in the various
shops. The policy will be to enforce
the demand by tying up practically
the entire mechanical service of the
roads.
Mr.. O'Connell says the convention
doubtless will fix date when the
nine-hour day must be in operation
on all roads, and he believes this date
should be some day in the autumn.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1901-05-30
The German Unryrs and Soldiers
Cause Our Sentries Much
Trouble In Peking.
ARE uSFplENDLY TO THE AMERICANS.
A United States Guard Placed Under
Arrest for Shooting and Slightly
Wounding a German Private.
The Ministers of the Powers Are
Closlng Details of the Business
Independent Of the Indem.
nifty Question.

Peking, May 27.--The United States
legation guard has had its first trou-
bic. Legation street is being pre-
pared near the legation, and an Amer
lean sentry was placed at the point
with orders to direct people around
by side street. Everybody obeyed
the request with the exception of the
Germans, both officers and soldiers,
who have caused the American SEN
tries much trouble.
One of the German officers drew
his sword and charged on the Amer
lean soldier, who brought his bayonet
to charge, whereupon the officer de-
sisted. subsequently, German SOL
dinr charged past the sentry, who
fired. hitting another German soldier
near the German legation, a quarter
OF mile off. This fortunately was
or!y slight flesh wound. The sem
tr.,' Las been placed under arrest, and
M#j. Robe rtson has instituted an
in, estigation.
The attitude of DIR. Mumm Won
Schwartzenstein, German minister
Won Waldersee, representing the mil
itary, as well as that of other high
officials, has been particularly friend
~ toward the Americans, which makes
all the more pronounced the un-
friendly feeling evinced by ma
jority of the German officers and
men.
This unfriendliness is attributed to
the American attitude in retaining
control with the legation guard of
one entrance to the Forbidden City,
which the Germans consider a refec-
ton upon their national honesty.
Sundays meeting of .he ministers
of the powers was devoted to closing
up details of business independent
of the indemnity question, although
the military authorities of the va
rious powers seem to consider a set
tlement in sight, as general prepara-
tions are being made for the evac-
uation of Peking in the early future.
Washington, May e7.-Officials here
attach no Importance to the dis
turbance between Germans and an
American sentinel at Peking. Such
affairs, while regretable, it is said.
are to be expected, especially where
the difference in the language
spoken might easily lead to a mis-
understanding of orders. No report
of the incident has been received at
the war department.
Berlin, May 25.-It is semi-officially
asserted that the resolutions by the
ministers of the powers in Peking
not to reduce the Chinese indemnity
below 45O,0OO,O0o taels is final, and
also that China accepts this.
The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1901-05-30
The Portraits Of Our Presidents
With Biographical Sketches
BY
General Charles H. 0rosvenor
Title page designed by Tiffany.

This Inaugural year, when the public mind
u aroused over Presidential qusstinns, u A.
ting time 70 issue General 6rosvepor's book.
IL sale y already tremendous, and viii per-
hsps exoesd thAsof General GRANTS Personal
Rvsry patriotic American desires 70 read
what General 0f0evsn0r hasto 'ssy Of George
Washington, Thomas Je6erson, Andrew jack
son, AbrahA@ Lipcolns prssident Mckinley
rssd vSs. sn
vsnor, the stauneh Republican leader In Con-
gress, win say Of that stsuhch old Democrat,
Andrew Jackson, The Father q ths Democratic
party. 0eusEpl 0rosysnos has thrown into his
sk.toh Of Jaetson sli the ers - energy Of his
grand. The biography OF Iineela 4 - bsauti-
ful - sunrise over the hilltops General
Hfosvsnor ha1 psesouAlly known III ~ presi-
deots slpos the tme Of JAnes Apchansa. Ths
0enerays book will thersfoFe contain history
from his oun personal obssrvstiou Of thoss
great men. 0snerAl Grosvsnor has served In
Congress for nearly twenty yesrs, and he has
eesved bis oountry IN var and In Congress for
nearly forty ysars- Phs book contains twenty
fouf large Photograyure Etchings - dne q
paper msas especially p cgdsr. These twsnty.
four Photogravure Etchipgs srs in different
tints, and sfe well worth % each. These Por.
trai6 are made from tbe paintings sndorssd BY
the family and near relatives Of the Presidents.
wS ss1., = tim: and o ior;uc: a.vs been e.
eomplsts book 4 we'll worth 80, but the price
has been plsesd 90 low that The most humble
American eitisen can own It.. The biograph-
ical sketches are printed tn large open type IN
two colors the work q 70 beautiful thas when
:s Ps:ySsas s9sy Y Hss e. II AK
subssllb3r. Thsrs o osss sdiio1 known = Ths
Prosident Edition Dc Grand LuxA initial let-