The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1901-09-15
BLUFF THAT WORKED
YOUNG NEW YORK DocToR,s
PROSPERITY RESULT OF
AN ACCIDENT
USED HIGH PRICED MEDICINE
Told His Patient 1t Cost $1,000 a
Pound and the Patient Told
1t to Others Who Be
came Patients

All TINS lovely prosperity which has
| been throwing itself at me in lunches .
| said the once struggling young physician
! to the New York Tribune lis really a
matter of such very short while that !
| am going around on tiptoe lest L shoe
/ the luck bird off the nest before she's
! laid all the eggs that my omelets en-
titled to. L don't mind it, not bit. OF
| course, It's my nrst experience with
| sculpured marble front. brass grill, hot
| water and Janltor service, uniformed
| han porter at all hours, but I'm making
a gallant struggle to live up to the bunch.
And it's all been done since New Year.
Last year this time 1 was working
| twenty-four hours a day, holding sponges
| at clinics for the sake of the experience
| and looking after private praLt:ce that
| didn't net my carfare. To be sure knew
| had a brilliant future before me, but
! for all practical purposes l was having
about as hard lines as fall to the share
OF most physicians when they try to
| break into New York practice. The
change has come to pass through one
| new drug-not so much through the drug
as through having the necessary amount
| OF gall to make it do the trick.
+ THE drug is a very recent one 1t
is not absolutely new, rather a new and
much more satisfactory form of a thing
i that has been in use for the last five
! or ten years. In fact, ever since l took
| up as my speciality in surgery t't pas
| sages of the head [ have been using this
| agent in it's older form Naturally l sent
| for some of the new stuff as soon as
| heard Of it in order to give it trial
! But when 1 learned the price 1 was i'm
| mediately impressed with the idea that
! my practice would have to worry along
! without it, for it costs a dollar a grain,
! and can assure you that as much as
| whole grain looks mighty cold and lone
! ly in the smallest size walls they make.
! Still, as L had blown in my good dollar
/ it was incumbent on me to get some re-
| turn.
! While L was just regretting my dol
! lar q patient happened, and that is the
| only word to describe it. He blew in
! right off the street, and between his
/ gaSpS he managed to make the servant
at the door understand he must see the
! doctor right away, and that he'd be will
! ing to pay double fee if he could get
] to the doctor without any delay in the
waiting room. That girl rose to the
I occasion like a bird. while he was wo"-
| rying his overcoat off in the hall she
walked over 20 the parlor and in quiet
! and most matter-of-fact tone told the
| parlor that they would be subjected to
/ some delay because of an urgent case
that could not be neglected a moment.
I Then she closed the parlor doors. It's
! just as well she did, for there was moth
ing in the parlor besides the furniture.
when [ got the case in my office after
| this little byplay in the hall he told me
that there was something the matter
with his throat and he could hardly
4 breathe and was afraid he would die,
but would 1 give him some temporary
relief until he could get to d throat man
| to have the thing properly repaired. Ii
! wasn't exactly fiattering, but L hadn t
then begun to dream of d practice where
it would be in the least essential to
adopt a fiattering tone with me. But
! he. had come to me, and l was a nose
| and throat man, even though he didn' t
! know it, and there was no reason why
l shouldn't have the job as well as any
| one else. So l hunted through my ta-
! BILE until / found a sample package of
j those sterilized wooden things to hold
I the tongue down with. 1 could see him
watching me hard when | ripped open its
! Theoretically sealed paraf1ne envelope
! with a pair OF foreceps, taken dripping
! from the bichIoride bowl, and picked up
! the wooden affair with other foreeps and
! passed it several times through a spirit
| flame. Then [ used it to depress the
! tongue; the patient said 'Al-h-h:' and
then it was easy to see what was the
matter with him. The top of his throat
was in bad shape, but there would be no
further difficulty if he would consent to
| have his tonsils taken out.
while l was selecting my instruments
for the operation, l tcld him that L was
going to use in his case a drug. that
would render the work practically pain
less and entirely bloodIess, but that it
was much too expensive to use on all
patients, for the lowest price it could be
bought for was $1,000 a pound That is
rather a Staggerer on the face of it, and
the impression was fully engraved upon
his thought surfaces when l exhibited
my dollars worth at the bottom of it's
little bottle. The operation was COM
plete success, the patient had no pain
and not drop Of his blood was shed.
He asked me how much it was, and [
replied that owing to the chaacter of
the operation and the expense of the ma
teriai employed [ must charge 500. You
could have knocked me down with
feather when he picked out one of the
green and yellow century ones and hand
ed it over The only thing he wanted to
know was whether L was of the opinion
that it would be- safe to make little
speech at a dinner that night, and he
seemed delighted when [ told him it
would be all right if he would promise
to stop at the first sign of straining the
throat. AS a further precaution L gave
MIN ABOUT a UeaSpOOnlul OF the solution
of the expensive stuff and showed him
how to apply few drops on cotton.
This casual patient, it turned out, was
the president of big trust company in
New England. and the dinner at which
he was to make his speech was attended
by about all the big men in banking ana
insurance He pretaced his remarks by
telling how his throat had choked up on
him in the morning and he expected to
die before he could get relief. Then he
mentioned my skill and came out strong
on the fact that he had been treated
with stuff that cost $1,000 a pound while
gold cost no more than $24O a pound
There was nothing contagious in his
throat trouble, but [ can assure you that
within the next month I must have OPP
Grated on at least a third of those who
were at that dinner when he gave me
my reading notice
cat bottom it was all bluff. The stuff
is perfectly good and probably better than
anything in it's line so far. The price is
as I have stated. But you can see how
small the real cost is when I tell you
that a piece of it no larger than the
head of a pin dissolved in a glaSsful of
water would last over a hundred patients.
The rest was imagination, and magma
ton is only grudgingly recognized by the
regular profession of medicine"