Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1901-11-07
A DOMESTIC COMEDY.
FTHE VARIED RESULTS OF REARRANG-
ING THE FURNITURE.

rrHE VARIED RESULTS OF REARRANG-
ING THE FURNITURE.
Mrs. Blanks Mania FOR Changing
the Appearance OF the Rooms
Brought Trouble 10 the Male Con-
tingent aud Sorrow TO Herse@.
DO you change the position Of the
furniture when you clean a roomF
inquired housewife no. / Of n friend in
the course of n heart TO heart talk.
"Do /? Why, yes, indeed! l don't
feel as if the room is cleaned unless
change the furniture n little bit. Do
you"
"Well, l usually change the orna-
ments around and so forth, but in the
spring and fali / like TO change every
thing in a room-cOmpletely alter the
whole appearance Of it. Then l fancy
the things are all new, and they seem
to look prettier somehow. But, do you
know, my husband doesn't like it at
air.
Neither does mine! Isn't that singu-
lar? Men are so peculiar.'
Eyes, indeed they are"
So many housekeepers share the
views of these two that story with
n moral will not be out of place.
1t was the other night only that Mr..
! Blank went unsuspiciously up stairs to
bed at an unusually early hour leaving
/ his wife reading in the sitting room.
/ He had a headache and carried a COB
/ let of water in his right hand. Fear
/ lessly advancing into the dark bed
room Mr.. Blank suddenly felt both legs
( violently cut from under him. He
clutched wildly at the air and said
several things of an explanatory ma
! ture, but there was nothing to save
him. He went down
( Good gracious, Henryw calculated
Mrs. Blank, hurrying TO the scene of
disaster. What is the matter?
Where are you? Why don't you light
! the gasT' Suiting the action to the
word, she bcheld her husband sprawl
ing across the bed; the glass he had
carried had discharged its contents
across the pillowshams and shivered on
the floor.
Mr.. Blank did the talking for the
next ten minutes. He said that of all
the blankety blank folly of which the
mind could conceive this Of changing
furniture around was the worst He
said it was a pretty thing for n man to
walk into his own room and have to
fall over things in the dark. He said
he wouldn't stand it; the furniture
must be replaced where it formerly
stood.
Il shan't do anything Of the kind,'
replied Mrs. Blank. 1T looks very
much nicer where it is. Why don't
you feel where you are going when you
get into dark ROOM"
"S'pose you'd like me to crawl in on
all foursm snailca Mr.. Blank. 81
couldn't feel where ..., bed was unless
l happened to touch The footboard. 1
thought l could walk clear over to the
bureau. / tell you IT'S n confounded
crank you have on This subject. Some
day you'll precipitate a serious acci-
dent
IL any bllE IItCI lcSt IL II Dt yOu-
l should think" retorted Mrs. Blank
icily. And the furniture remained
where it was.
1t was the next evening that Master
Blank undertook to carry n pile OF
schoolbooks from the dining room to
the sitting room. He had a bottle of
ink in his hand, and he thought he
knew exactly where the center table
was. In the course of his peregrina
tions in search of it, however, he came
into violent collision with the glass
door of the bookcase, which he broke
There were also inky traces discernible
on the carpet when Mrs. Blank came
in. This time there was some balm for
her feelings. She could spank Master
Blank and did it with the best will in
the world.
Her own downfall was not long il
coming, however, although for a few
days only minor Inconvenience were
met with such as the abrasion of an
kles against chair rockers and Sigh
bruises received by means of suddeI
contact with unforeseen obstacles. Las
evening Mrs Blank undertook to trans
fer the cage Of her pet parrot from th'
window where it spends the day to thu
snug corner where ii passes the night
She did not trouble to light the gas, ant
by some unaccountable mental laps
she had forgotten the precise point q
which a tabouret. on which stood a jar
diniere, was stationed. She charged
into the tabouret with considerable
force, was overbalanced by the weigh
of the cage in her arms and took I
header with a resounding crash. Th
parrot shrieked. and, unable TO distin
guish friend from foe, inflicted a sever
bite on her mistress finger. Mr.. BlanI
came in hurriedly, picked up his wifi
and assisted in making an inventory o
sundry Contusions. Then they lifteI
the parrot cage, badly bent, and tn
jardiniere with a piece Clipped out o
it and the tabouret somewhat scratch
ed, and then Mr.. Blank observed quiet
Iy:
81 have just one thing to ask you
Mrs. Blank Was / right?"
mo, you were not?' retorted Mrs
Blank savagely. Serious accident
What's serious about this, | should lik
to know? For goodness sake, Henry
don't stand there trying to look like
martyr! If you must have the furni
ture novel back, I'll move it" An'
she did.-rhiadelphia Record.