Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1901-08-22
On the Eve of Tomorrow.

County W Oodmens picnic at LaneaS-
ter will have become an event in his
tory, the thousands of visitors will be
talking Of the fun and frolic they en-
ioyed and once more Wen settle down
TO quiet life. All the Herald desires
to say just on the eve before the bali
opens in the way Of advice TO pro-
spective visitors is to keep cool.
Don't feel that you have got to see
everything in the forenoon, and walk
fast and get your eorns to aching.
Just take things easy and you will
get around to take it all in before
YOU 70 home If YOU intend to make
some purchase while here Just look
over the advertisements in the Herald
divide your money up in wads, and
spend the greater part of it with those
truly good men whose advertisements
you have read. Ii you are coming on
the train secure return ticket and
button it inside your vest or shirt
waist as the case may be where no.
body can get it away from you with
out you knowing it. Wear old shoes.
Don't ever go to any kind OF "doin $
with new shoes on, because, while
YOU may admire the looks of your
underpinning along at first, after you
have walked around on the sidewalks
and macadam streets for few miles
and the new shoes begin to tighten
up and squeeze and develop strange
punches and your feet begin to swell,
you will be so unhappy that you will
swear you will never go anywhere
again, whereas, if you wear old shoes
you won't know that you have got
anything on your feet. If you have
ipgrowing t0enails, becareful. There
is no place where ingrowing toenails
are so out of place as in a crowd,
where nobody seems to care whose
feet are stepped on as long as their
own feet are on top. If you are
troubled with dyspepsia you may be
cured if you come to the Woodmen
picnic. but if you are not feeling bet
ter by noon you had better 90 along
| home. Sometimes change of diet
ana good laugh will jar something
loose in the stomach or liver and the
dyspepsia disappears. You will be
sure to have a change Of diet at least
if YOU come for every hotel aud lunch
room will throw itself to cook some
thing different from the other, and
for dinner YOU will have roast beef,
turkey and six kinds of pie, and the
next meal you may get balled up in
crowd so you can't get out and you
wall have to tackle a weiner. a cheese
sandwich and glass Of beer Bring
an overcoat and an um brella for you
cannot tell in this climate whether
you are going to have aisunstroke OF
| chilblains, warm rain or hail stones
as big as ostrich eggs. Bring along
plenty Of money, but don't buy gold
bricks, stock in mines or horses that
haven't got a pimple on them, at
least don't purchase until you have
had a veterinary surgeon examine the
gold brick. But if you get out of
money don't worry and feel that you
are ruined. Anybody will lend you
money to go home. Just find a man
wearing a badge, and there'll be lots
of 'em, tell him how your fixed, and
ne will divide with you or give you
an order on a man who viii. If YOU
are man and good looking, may be
you had better not come, for this
town is going to contain about two
thousand of the handsomest and best
women folks that ever did live any
where and you are liable TO go home
broken-hearted However. if YOU
have no chaperone, and are willing TO
take ,our chances, and wall agree not
to kick at what happens to you. you
can come to the Herald Office and
leave your name and valuables and
card stating where you want your
remains sent. and you can 90 out on
the street and let them look at you.
There is fun and frolic promised
for all, so come out to the biggest
picnic YOU ever attended and you will /
never regret it.
If dealer asks you to take some |
thing said to be 'Just as good as Rocky /