davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The age-herald., 1901-11-17
TICKET sPEcULAToR.
They Help the Man Who Is in a
 Hurry,

From the New York Times.
 Charles Burnham, the theatrical man. ager, recalls story that the late Theo- dore Moss was fond of telling of Mr. Lester Wallack apropos of the present movement against the ticket spectators. MT Wallack was much opposed to al- lowing the speculators in front of his theater, then at the corner of Broadway and Thirteenth street and used to stand at the entrance to the theater and tell his patrons that they could get good seats at the box office if they would get into the line. He discovered one evening a friend in the act of purchasing a ticket from speculator and rushed up to him, exclaiming:
 See here. old fellow: save your money you can get good seats at the box of flee at regular prices"
 ''Oh, now, go away, Wallack," retorted the other. Do you suppose I want to have my ladies standing in your lobby while I take my turn in the line at tho box office window when I get accommo- dated immediately by this man by pay- ing him his premium? To a man in a hurry I consider the ticket speculator a great accommodation"
 After that" Wallack used to explain, "I never sought to interfere with the ticket speculators. That they were a public accommodation had never occurred to me-"
The age-herald., 1901-11-17

LII. JAmEO N LILLIAN AlOO.
 surely discovered the elixir of life. That he Is able with the aid of a mysterious compound, known only to himself, pro- duced as a result of the years he has spent in searching for this precious life- giving boon, to cure any and every dis ease that is known to the human body There is no doubt of the doctors earnest cess in making his claim and the re- niarkable cures that he Is daily effecting seems to bear him out very strongly. His theory which he advances is one of req son and based on sound experience in a medical practice of many years. It costs nothing to try this remarkable Elixir of Life," as he calls 1t, for he sends 1t free, to anyone who is sufferer, in suf- flcient quantities 10 convince of it's abil- ity to cure, so there is absolutely no risk to run. Some of the cures cited are very remarkable, and but for reliable wit nesses would hardly be credited. The lame have thrown away crutches and walked about after two or three trials of the remedy. The sick, given up by home doctors, have been restored to their families and friends in perfect health. Rheumatism, neuralgia, stomach heart, liver, kidney, blood and skin diseases and bladder troubles disappear as by magic. Headaches, backeches, nervousness, levers consumption, coughs colds, asth- ma, catarrh, bronchitis and all affec- tions of the throat, lungs or any vital organs are easily overcome In a space of time that Is simply marvellous
 Partial paralysis, locomotor 2taxia, dropsy, gout, scrofula and piles are quickly and permanently removed. It purifies the entire system, blood and tissues, restores normal nerve power, circulation and a state of perfect health Is produced at once. To the doctor all systems are alike and equally affected by this great Elixir of Life" Send for the remedy today. It is free to every sufferer. State what you want to be cured of and the sure remedy for it will be sent you free by return mail.
 11-17
The age-herald., 1901-11-17

costume. A brides dowry consists, De- Eides her wardrobe, in quantities of household linen. kitchen utensils, silver tea and dinner service, carpets, curtains, etc. If a wife die without children a greater portion of. the dowry may be claimed by her family. Very few we'd ding presents are given.
 May Is an unlucky month for weddings and they never take place on Tuesdays or Thursdays, because the one is the eve of the day on which Christ was sold and the other the eve of Friday when he was crucified, Saturday Is also ta- booed, because 1t is the eve of the holy Sabbath.
 During the week previous to the we'd ding the bride 9oes about in most Golorious manner, weeping and wailing in stentorian tones and entreating her rel atives to break the engagement and not to send her away into land of strang- ers-even though she be going no fur ther than the next street. The last even ing before the wedding all her girl friends come to take leave of her. There is very pretty ceremony attached to this evening, which may be the one from which the custom of making gifts to the bridesmaids was derived. The bride brings out parcel, which she opens, and discloses all the ribbons, flowers. etc., which she has heretofore worn on her hair; these she distributes among her friends, each being considered a souvenir of good luck; when there are not enough to go around they are cut in two or three pieces.
 Marriages always take place in the church, the guests gathered around a temporary altar in the center decora ted with flowers. As the Russian churches have no seats, this is very convenient.
 The attendants are all men, who hold the brides gloves when she removes them to exchange rings; carry home for her the piece of red carpet upon which she knelt to receive the nuptial benediction; distribute money to the poor in her name; make a collection for the musi- clans. and one of them always dances the first quardrille with her.
 The groom's best man goes with him to the church and then makes haste to fetch the bride. She, being prepared to leave the house, falls on her knees before her parents and begs them to forgive
The age-herald., 1901-11-17

the sams timo sho hopes he will repro HaEu Hn1 punish her when she needs it.
 Anciently, in some portions of R,,ssis the bride was crowned with A garland or wormwood, which typiffed the bitter ness of the married state; frequently now the priest sprinkles on her head a hand full of hops with the wish that she may be as fruitful as that plant Sometimes an official of the church, clad in a rough goatskin cloak. accompanies the bridal pair to their home praying that they may have as many children as thera are hairs in his coat
 Divorce Is unknown in Russia. The laws forbid fourth marriage of widow or widower. third is considered some what improper and demands a penance of five years exclusion from holy com munion, while even for a second mar riage two years penance must be done.
The age-herald., 1901-11-17

i, whatever ofenses she may have com mitted against them They raise her up, kiss her and offer her bread and salt as typifying the necessities of life.
 When she leaves they do not close the door behind her, which indicates that their house is still her home.
 At stated point in the ceremony two golden crowns are held above the heads of bride and groom by the attendants; these are thrice exchanged at the com mand of the priest, and 1t is very funny to see what desperate efforts the men make to keep the crowns from touching the brides head, which would be sign of very bad luck indeed. Whichever touches the red carpet first when the pair kneels will have the upper hand in all matters during their married life.
 Having exchanged rings. the priest clasps their hands and leads them three times around the altar in token of the trinity the bride and groom and all the others bearing lighted candles, de- corated with ribbons. There is super stition that the one whose taper has burned the slower will outlive the other
 The candles are supposed to have ref erence to the lamps which the virgins carried when they went forth to meet the bridegroom CMatthew xxv.) They drink wine out of the same glass as siSH lhdl thty VIII snare the cup or enternal life.
 The ceremony concludes, the bride is taken to the home of her husband, where she Is met and welcomed by his parents He then asks the wife to remove his boots telling her there is a purse in one and whip in the other, and that she must take her choice; if she first. finds the purse she is very happy, but If she chances to take off the one containing Wl1D from it. Sometimes the bride strikes her husband with the boot after having taken it off as protest against the idea of her inferiority implied in the act.
 In some provinces the father gives his daughter a blow with a whip on the we'd ding morn. and then hands it over to the new husband saying 1t is now his priv ilege to use 1t.
 In another part of Russia the bride has ready on her bridal day a whip which she has herself made and which she gives unto her husbands hands, telling him at
The age-herald., 1901-11-17
LAURA 3. STARR.

w 4 < 4; :.; ;;: ;:;:: : ,: $: :$: E
The age-herald., 1901-11-17
The Pebbles of Fashion,

From the Baltimore American.
 If you would save your pennies" said the Economical Person. they would soor amount to a tidy sum-
 But" protested the Fashionable Indi. vidual, "tidies have been out of Style foi yearsl"
 Mercy on us! Would these gratuitous advisers have us go contrary to the die. tates of the mode in order to amass competence?
The age-herald., 1901-11-17
Break Quickly Remedied.
From the New York Times.

From the New York Times.
 The Rev. Clinton Locke. who was for nearly half a century rector at Grace Episcopal church, in Chicago. was the immediate predecessor of Ernest M. Stires, recently called to New York. Dr. Locke tells this story of how his quick witted wife once saved him from an awk- ward situation. One afternoon, while en- toying good book in the parlor his wife noticed a woman coming tip the front steps whom he particularly detested. The doctor fled precipitately. leaving his wife to meet the caller After a half hour had passed Dr. Locke came out of his study and listened at the head of the
The age-herald., 1901-11-17

NNH very expensive, the father WAW of the bride often spending G1 ES his lifelong savings for his daughters dowry and marriage festivi- ties, notwithstanding that in many prov inaes the wedding conductor and bridesn1en often bear a portion of the ex- pepse.
 Russian marriages are not made in heaven, but on the spot by go-betweons, who are in many cases godparents. The matter of the dowry, etc, being arranged tho young people are, consulted, and Ii there is any strenuous objection on either side the negotiations frequently fall through, but as a rule children, and par ticularly girls, are too well brought up to set up direct opposition to the will of their parents.
 Short engagements are the rule, and the wedding follows hard upon the be- trothal, which is almost as sacred and binding as the marriage ceremony. Near 1 ly all marry young; girls at the age of | 16 and young men at 1S Up to the day l of her marriage the Russian peasant girl wears her long, thick hair plaited in one braid down her back. On her wedding morn 1t is either cut short or divided in two braids and wound around her head; over this the mother-in-law puts a small red cap. which ties behind and Is the badge of her new condition.
 The entire week previous to the we'd ding is given over to festivities in both families. In some parts of the country the bridegroom-elect is allowed to spend as much time as he likes with his be- trothed, going to the house nearly every day and remaining until it Is time to close the house at night.
 Usually the bride and her friends, who come one afternoon a week to help, make the entire trousseau, and woe betide her if any mistake is made, for nothing is so certain to bring misery and unhappiness in her new life as to have any of the stitches unpicked.
 The bridegroom presents the wedding
The age-herald., 1901-11-17
SICK MADE WELL
 WEAK MADE STRONG
Marvellous Elixir of Life Discovered by Famous Doctor-Scientist That
 Cures Every Known Ailment
Wonderful Cures Are Effected That Seem Like Miracles Performed
 The Secret of Long Life of t olden Times Revived.
The Remedy Is Free to All Who Send
 Name snd Addrees.

Alter years of patient study, and delv- ing Into the dusty records of the past, as well as following modern experiments i= the realms of medical science, Dr. James w. Kidd, 1500 First National Ba.ik building, Fort Wayne, Ind, makes the startling announcement that he has
The age-herald., 1901-11-17
And Off He Went.

From the Philadelphia Press.
 "Oh! my" exclaimed the dead beat, who had been ostentatiously fishing for his fare, i've lost my last nickel. I'm not as well off as I thought I was.'
 No" replied the wise conductor, as he rang the bell to stop, but you're really better off"
The age-herald., 1901-11-17
A Plea for Purity.

From the Baltimore American.
 What we want" said the First Pa- triot, lis honest elections"
 'I should say so," agree the Second Pa. triot. Why, Heeler promised me $50 for my influence in my ward, and now he says he never agreed to give me moro than $10"
The age-herald., 1901-11-17

stairs. Hearing nothing below, he calhd down to his wife:
 Has that horrible old bore gone yet,.
 The caller was still there. Mrs. Loctt was equal to the emergency, howeveF and she called back [,
 "Yes, dear. she went nearly an hou ago. Mrs. A. Is here now"
The age-herald., 1901-11-17
FIGHTING JOE WHEELER"
 SWIMS A RIVER
Continued from page 5.

Iron rails still adhering to the stringers This I ascertained by personally feeling the iron rails and stringers feet below the surface, with my hands. Continuing the examination, I next found a series of brick piers. about fifteen in number, all, however, beneath the surface Beyond these brick piers found a rapid run of water about 150 feet wide, the greatest depth, Of feet, being near the north side, where the railroad commences again. afterwards crossed the river. and examined the railroad north of It.
 As there was not a boat within fifty miles of the spot, all of this getting around in the rapid stream was done by swim ming. It was very necessary that the work on the washout be completed with in few days for the purposes of for warding supplies to the soldiers who were operating against the insurgents beyond the river. That was the reason why General Wheeler was in such great haste to ascert ain the exact condition of the wreck and the length of time 1t would require to repair the track. The engineer soldiers who were at work upon the washout were at a considerable dis tance further back along the track, and so none save Captain Sibert witnessed the Generals swimming feat. The nearest newspaper correspondents were several miles away, either at the front or in the rear. Naturally none of them supposed that there would be any such history making at a mud hole like the Tarlac washout, which was at once many miles from the enemy and the American head quarters.
 His Bathing Costume.
 The bathing costume of General Wheel CT was identical with the one In vogue in Georgia during the last year of Rhe civil war. namely an old slouch hat and a very determined expression of counte- nance. The general did not explain why he wore this hat, as he was under the wa ter almost as much of the time as he was on the surface. If some enterprising cam era owner had come along about that time he would no doubt have secured a most interesting collection of photograph ic records, though the chances are that the general would have had him arrest ed and his negatives smashed before he could have got out of the neighborhood.
 General Wheeler showed that he was an adept at swimming every stroke down. The swiftness of the current apparently gave him but little trouble. and when ever he got ready to go to the bottom he went down like rock and stayed un- der an alarmingly long time. He hardly stopped to rest five minutes at a time, but splashed as lustily as young por- boise from the moment he plunged in until he clambered back on the bank.
 Every one knows that "Old Joe" Is no more than a scrap of a man even in full regalia and topped off with heavy army overcoat, but when he took to the water on this occasion he looked hardly as large as the proverbial nickels worth of tea. The broad slouch hat also in- tensifled the effect.
 General Wheeler's friends have always known of his prowess as a swimmer. At Santiago he jumped off one of the army transports and took a dip in the sea.
The age-herald., 1901-11-17
lnfantiIe Pride,

From the Cleveland Plain Dealer.
 "Pohl My papa wears evenin clothes every time he goes to parties"
 That aint anythin'. Our minister wears his night clothes every time he preaches.'
The age-herald., 1901-11-17
He Could Walt.

From the Atlanta Constitution.
 Here's the devil to pay' exclaimed the old man. coming in with a handful of bills. ..
 Don't worry about him. dear" said the wife; The knows that you'll settle with him hereafterl"
The age-herald., 1901-11-17
In an Acute Form.

From the Philadelphia Record
 Wiggs-Bjones suffers from hay fever, doesn't he?
 Wagg-I should say he does. He can't even pass a grass widow without sneez- ing.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1901-02-07
nrr NAMES CUT ON THE BIAS.

Oct term. of fond endearment please the
average loving lass,
II cut upon the bias the reverse 'heii coiaes
to pass;
Her bltsses and her kisses turn perslmmon-
like and sour,
aer soft eyes harden sadly as on you they
CLINT and glover;
iris but single step from names that thaW
her into smiles
IN those that make her stare at you in
scores of cutting styles.
she clucks If you call her chick, but II you
call her hen,
Her looks are like to those a wildcat flashes
from its den;
Call her a lamb she softly bleats, but just
call her sheep,
And note how incandescent daggers from
her lashes leap:
Call her kitten and she purrs, but call
her simply cat,
And you will need doctors aid to tell you
where you're at.
Call her duck, and she quacks praise, but
if you call her goose,
Though that, too, is a waterfowl she calls
1t foul abuse;
Call her a sweet canary, and just like one
But call her crow or magpie, and you suffer
her i'll will;
She likes to be called mocking bird, sweet
oriole or lark,
But call her jay. and on your hide she then
may make her mark.
Suppose you call her troutlet, she will
nestle close and look
As sweet as any angel ever pictured in a
book;
But Just call her a mullet, though that is a
pretty thing,
A buihead or a cod, and you cannot too
soon take wing:
You may call her an antelope, gaZelle, 9
mouse or deer.
But rat or fox, and yours becomes a lurid
atmosphere.
Choose we'll pet names of animals, Of in
sects or of birds,
As choice of appellations calls for incest
choice of words:
Her humors ere so changeful and her feel
ings so intense
That name cut on the bias proves an in
suit most immense;
In short, in this as other things your popsey
wopsey pearl.
Though sweet as velvet taffy, is a most Pc
culiar girl.
/. EDGAR JONES.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1901-02-07
M RS. JILLSON'S roquacity was both
III the wonder and torment of the

mn RS. JlLLSON'S roGuacity was both
lu the wonder and torment of the
Daily Aspect force, Typographical
Union No. II. Nothing approaching
her in volubility had ever been known
before. Shop No. II was wont to men,
ton with sort of dismal pride in the
distinction that their Mrs. Jillson
could out-talk anything in the craft,
and this belief was sustained by the
testimony of "Neck," the loose-joint-
ed tourist from Tennessee, who was
built something like giraffe and held
eases in Mrs. Jillson's alley. "Neck"
had worked in all sorts of newspaper
offices, from New Orleans to Mon
treal.
Mrs. Jillson's favorite topic was the
loo offices of Chicago and her expe-
nences therein. and she was enter
tanning the tourist from Tennessee
Witn distracting tumble of personal
tecoliectlons, while in impotent fury
mat worthy writhed and twisted the
Elongated organ which gave him his
name. She was little old woman,
ana there was a tacit understanding
.hat she was not to be "called down"
as were other offenders.
oh dear me, don't you know how
disappointed l was everything was
" strange l wasn't used to it at all.
90 much correcting to do I couldn't
make anything at all and got so dis
outraged l had notion to quit. But
y course we got used to it after
swniie 1t was all right and such good
wages l wish was there now. Oh
aear me yes it's so much nicer to
work in the city"
MINUS, the one-eyed apprentice,
spaced his lines with particular care
- ne cast apprehensive glances ct
nlcnards, the foreman, who was MAX
s up the patent medicine "ads."
,,. ooy knew that the sulphuric
Aicnards always dwelt with especial
sapnasls upon the shortcomings of
apprentices when he was goaded by
eAA .. JliIS0n,
Inc Job Offices of Chicago were SO
ul,y, Mrs. Jillson was rafting away
sn Ma'n her accustomed eomplacencv.
lefiectly awful not fit FOR a woman
"ork In you know, but then of
soarse they were not all that way.
some OF them We're real nice and such
nlce men to work for"
suffering Moses muttered Rich
us' Sieiously slamming a plate into
t.see' sa%. will that woman never stop
A'nss Minus! Don't you ever
."eep out under this stone?"
III do it right now, sir" meeklv
paso Minus, SLIPPING quickly from
IT'S perfectly awful the wav tbev
!" on some of those religious papers.
- nuea , the loquacious one. Used
~ ~ 'oek the doors and work on Sunday
e managers wouldn't know a thing
a' II. my, how they did beha.e +
!, az aWIui don't you think so? oh
: course they were not all tba.
a.. a'nus!' roared the foreman. "sav.
nas.. M. are you raising such dust iorp
sn.; you know better than to sveen
u1'0s working hours2.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1901-02-07

"Steele wants to see you, Mr.. Richv

"Steele wants to see you, Mr.. Richv
ards
The tense lines about Richards
mouth grew harder than they had at
Gaynor's words. As he entered the Of
flee the two or three who had been
lounging in the street returned. They
were all there, waiting to witness his
humiliation. Steele turned away from
his desk as his foreman entered.
"You want to see me?" said Rich
ards, quietly.
"Yes. The fact is, Richards, we have
been considering your case lately.
Perhaps the boys have mentioned it
to you
mo, SIR" said Richards, doggedly.
He knew what was coming and was
determined to die game. mo, they
never mentioned it. The boys don't
get much chance to talk in there, Mr..
Steele"
"Well, they have been talking to me,
and it has set me to thinking that
something must be done. We have all
thought whole lot about you the past
year, but it is easier to let matters
slide along than it is to take action,
and then you know most of us have
troubles of our own. You're lonesome
here. Richards. You're not one of US
at all. You're morose. and bitter, and
think we're all against you, when the
fact is we're only careless and don't
know very well how to approach you.
We've let you alone in your troubles,
and we're all heartily ashamed of it.
There. there, never mind what you
thought. We're only going to have a
little family party for the printers
tomorrow, and you and your boys are
to be with us. 1t will make you feel
better to get out among people again,
and you'll find we were not as heart,ess
as you thought"
Its going to be a lovely day." re-
sumed the editor, while Richards stood
like bashful boy, unable to frame a
reply. Perhaps we ought to go to
church But there's Neck we
couldn't take him along, could We?
And l want this to be an outing for the
whole force" He arose and looked
around the little circle of faces, and
perceived that two awkward situations
were impending: Richards was in dam
ger of utterly breaking down, and
Mrs. Jillson was about to break into
the conversation. He seized his hat and
started for the door.
"Of course you'll come, Richards.
That's all settled" Steele was an en-
terprising man who had begun life as
section hand and afterward very
properly abjured that calling as too
humble for one of his talents. Among
other accomplishments pertaining to
his new station he had laboriously ac-
auired a fashionable accent, which he
was generally at great pains to ex-
plot in his converse ton. In moments
of excitement, however, he was prone
to return to the idioms of the section
boss, and in his haste to get away from
Mrs. Jillson he voiced a very excellsnt
sentiment in very bad English.
There's ways and ways of celebrat-
ing New Years. l don't quarrel with
no other mans way, but right here in
this Office 1 don't see how we could do
better job of cele bra ting than by help.
in feller out of the blues.'