Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1901-09-08

who was it said he didn't care who
made III laws iv a country if he cud
on'y wlite tn pomes?" asked Mr.. Doc
ley.
4 niver heerd," said Mr.. Hennessy.
"Wel, twas some frind iv Hogan's,"
said Mr.. Dooiey. An tn man was
wrong. He was wrong, Hinnissy.
don't want to make tn laws Nv tn
country. I'm dom pretty we'll to
keep thin that ar-re made now. An
as FIR III pothry. I'd as lave twas
whrote be other hands thin mine.
was r-readin' in tn pa-aper tn other
day Nv la-ad down in tn midway that
says Longfellow that l used to think
was a .ale good pote-he wrote life is
rale, life is earnest, dye mind, an l
believe tn same mesilf-Longfellow
ought never to we left tn plumbin' bust
ness an Milton was about as much Nv a
pote as Edward Atkinson an Shake
spere ought to be took up FIR obtainin
money be false pretinces.
"Ivirybody has crack at a pote
whin he gets a chanst. There's me
frind. Roodyard Kipling. | don't mind
tellin ys he amt my kind iv pote.
Hogan is more to me taste. Dlo ye
liver r-read his PONIES oh, Star, an
oh. Moon?' Well, that's as far as he
liver wlnt. He goes home at night an
takes off his coat an sets down with
a pencil in his mouth an writes: ON,
Star an oh, Moon an thin he can't
think iv anything that wud do JUS
tice to thin, so he says, oh, tn dlVVle'
an comes over here FIR drink.
"Roodyard Kipling is dif'rint kind
iy pote He don't keep pothry fr
style SO that he can turn out behind
it an say, Boys, what dye think Nv
that e. high shteppin' pothry" Com
fort an not display Is his motto. Whin
he asks what Hogan calls tn Muse fr
to come up an spind week with him,
he doesn't expict her to set all day in
tn hammock on tn front stoop singin'
about tn bur-rds. She's got to do tn
weeks washin', clane the windows,
cook tn meals, chime tn pianny, dust
TIL furniture, mend tn socks, an milk
tn COW he day an be night she's got
to set up an balance tn books iv an
empire. Whin this Muse has thrown
up her job at Kipling's, she'll be as
good as second girl as amy pOte wud
want to hire. So Roodyard Kiplings
pomes is in great demand. Theyr re
warranted not to tear or shrink or
r-run in tn wash an he'll guarantee
to fit all sizes an ages. VIII we have
wan or two hip pockets in ye'er pome,
Mr.. Rhodes he says. Boy, wrap up
this package iv self-rising pothry FIR
tn Canajeen market. | can do this
kind Nv war pome fr We FIR eight an
six An SO it goes He's got orders
to put u annyul rapport iv tn Bank
iv England. tn crop statistics Nv tn
Agarieoolchral Department an tn
quotations Nv tn stock exchange in
pothry. His pothry will be listed mex
year an We can Tread it on a ticker
in saloon. He had pome tn other
day shown that tn English army
ought to buy more horses an mules,
FIR as he pinted out, horse can run
fasther thin amy man. no matther
what his record may be- Twas good
wurrukin' pome. | didn't like 1t as
much as tn oh Star kind, but, sure
live an let live is me motto, an II q
man wants to INSTRUCT his country
what it ought to do be playin' his ad-
vice on harp or dom jig, It's not
FIR me to criticize him. | don't want
ito hang Roodyard Kipling because he
had a pome that sounds like speech
be Lyman J. Gage on tn legal tindher
act. But tits diffrint with me fellow
citizens an fellow lithry joynts. A
few years ago Roodyard Kipling come
over here an got pnoomony Nv the
lungs an 1t looked fr long time as
though tn mex pome he figured in
wud be wrote with stone mason's
chisel. Well, sir, IL leaked out that he
had bad chest an tn kind-hearted
American public began to weep into
it's beer. ,shey was line Nv tillygraft
boys block long at tn hotel with