davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1901-02-14
HEROIC TREATMENT.
It MAddened the Sufferer, but 1t Ef-
fected q Cure.

IT MAddened the Sufferer, but 1T Ef-
fected q Cure.
A Binghamton man began to hiccough
last Saturday. He hiccoughed all day
and all night and was hard at it Sunday
morning. Every remedy that his alarm
ed friends gave him seemed to accelerate
the hics. People sent In from oil over
town and recommended sure cures, and
he steadily grew worse.
Then a wise neighbor had bright idea.
He thought it all out by himself. He
went over to the hiccougher's home and
was ushered into the room where the at
ficted one was fast hiccoughing his life
away.
'Hello," said the neighbor in light
and cheerful tone. SLOWS the old soak
this morning?"
The sufferer rolled his eyes at the
neighbor in panied surprise.
Don't give me any Of your crocodile
glances," snorted the friend. "1f you'd
quit drinking when / told you to. you
wouldn't be In this shameful condition"
"Wh-hic-at's th-hic-atT gasped the
sick man.
"Oh, don't come any of your innocent
business on me-" cried the neighbor. Il
know you, you old sponge"
The hiccougher's face turned red.
"What-hic-did- DISQUALIFICATION
he suffered.
SCALED you a sponge, you lobster"
beloved the neighbor. you're pretty
object lesson for your unfortunate chill
dren, amt you, you gulpng old hypo-
crite"
Get out Of my-hic-house" roared
the sick man.
go to blazes" yelled the neighbor.
"I'm going to stay right here and see the
last Of you. The people on the street
sent me over. Wait until the old VOLTS
gone they said, and then wave flag
out Of the window They're going to
have a jollification supper and fireworks
tonight, and don't you dare to disappoint
'emv'
This was too much for the hiccougher.
He said several very bad words as he
made q dash ut the neighbor, and they
raced around the room half dozen
times, the hiccougher getting padder at
every jump, and then the ncishbor dart
ed through the door and escaped.
The sick man flung a howerpot at him
as he raced down the yard, and then he
suddenly realized that his hiccoughs had
gone.
For that was part of the neighbours
theory, you see. He believed that If he
could get the dying man real excited and
angry the atiliction would leave him, and
he proved he was right.-Cleveland Plain
Dealer.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1901-02-14
HOW WE PERSPtRE,
The Miles of Sweat Glands That Are
on the Human Body.

ut may be interesting to know that
one perspires more on the right side Of
the body than on the left and that the
skin of the palm of the hand excretes
four and half times as much proper
tionately to the surface as the skin Of the
back" says Harvey Sutherland in Aims
.ee's. '"Ihe pores in the ridges of the
palm number as many as 5000 to the
square inch. They are scarcest on the
back, where there are only 400 to the
square inch. These pores are not simple
noles or perforations in the hide as some
imagine, but are little pockets lined with
the same epithelium or pavement stuff
that covers the external Of the body
They run straight down into the deepest
structure of the skin, and there they kink
UP and coil around till they look like a
fishing line that has been thrown down
wet Inclosed in this knot are little veins
that leak the perspiration through the
walls of the tube, and it wells up to the
surface Of the skin.
ut is estimated that the average sized
man has 100000 Of these sweat glands,
aggregating % miles of tubing. Think Of
it! Twenty miles if all those tiny
tubes could be Strengthened out and put
end to end These figures, wonderful
though they may seem, are on tho very
BEST medical authority. They are the tig-
ures of men who have given their lives to
the study of this subject. But still, If
they seem too large to you, there is just
IA good medical authority for the state
ment that there are 100000 sweat
Glands on the human body, each one-hf-
eenth of an inch long, and that their ag-
regate length is two miles and q half!
Think of it. Two miles and half!
If you object to that, too, have the
very best authority for the statement that
they are one-quarter of an inch long and
aggregate more than nine miles, or ! can
figure it for you at seven miles or II miles.
Take your pick. Our motto Is, We aim
please If one figure suits you more
han another, it's yours. We can sub
%tantiate 1t by the very best medical au-
tlority.
II find only one figure, however. for the
amount of liquid secreted by the skin OF
an average person in n year, though it Is
evident that the quantity must vary
greatly according as the person works In
On incehouse or rides bicycle up hill.
From the average person in years time
there ooze through the pores of the skin
1900 pounds of water. Let us see: "A
pint's pound the world around two
pints make one quart, four quarts one
Callon-oh, well, you cipher it out for
yourself. l never was much Of a hand at
frures'
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1901-02-14
Food Niokna m es,

In London sleeps head stewed with
onions is called field lane duck" Po-
tatoes are Irish apricots" and Munster
plums" A herring is called in different
localities Of England a "Digby chicken"
Norfolk capon." a Dunbar wether"
or "Gourock ham" In France it Is
customary to call herring 'poulet de
carcme" Lenten fowl. In our own
country. In New England Goldfish is fire.
quently known as Cape Cod turkey"
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1901-02-14

The proverbial wit of the Irish jarvey
Is oftentimes mixed with an undercur-
rent of stern reality that is as touching
as 1t is eloquent
Driving through Sackvlle street, Dub
lin, one day on an outside car, the wretch
ed appearance Of the horse suddenly
struck visitor, who said:
Pat. you ought to be taken up for
cruelty to animals, driving such an old
screw as that"
"Begorra, sur" was the quick reply,
'if | didn't dhrive that, I'D be taken up
for cruelty to a wife and six children!'-
London 1it-Bits.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1901-02-14
MARRIAGE.

rhou art my own. my darling and my wife,
And when we pass into another life,
Still thou art mine. All this which now we see
Is but the childhood Of eternity
And thou and !, through trials and through tears
The joys and sorrows of our earthly years,
Are growing up into single soul.
Gods workmanship, a clear completed whole
Make out Of twain. Our love is but begun.
Forever and forever are one
Arthur Munby In London Spectator.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1901-02-14
The word "Cossack" Is Turkish and
means free man" or free lance"
Secrets Not to BE Kept.

He-You know they say woman can't
keep a secret.
She-That's q libel. A woman can
keep q secret as easily as a man can
all but two kinds. There are secrets
that aren't worth keeping and others
that are too good to keep.-Boston
Transcript.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1901-02-14
Both Together0neY earfor0n|y l'55

In this way you your own home paper ana an ~ ,bs
magazine at price that only about fourth OF what some o. e
illustrated magazines sell for For three years The CoSnooH
ndprtedy Claimed that reached the largest clientele ro ~
anv PERIODICAL daily weekly monthly in the world was t
T0snopoln which sent Julian Hawthorne to INDIA 10 e IN. M"
know the real horrors of famine and plague was me
tan which established at its cost great Free M
University which now has 10000 students on us fos m
The Conopoitan which offered prize OF 80 OOo TOT inc te
less carriage and pz best plans for public baths ana eSt %
uent of sewer and pipe systems for cities was ne %
which, the presidents of great schools and universities Soy
discussing the defects of existing educational systems. M
Cosmopolitan whose enterprise always in the lead III ADVANCING w
worlds civilization
We succeeded arranging for two additional offers in
connection with this journal and The Cosmopolitan.
After placing yourbook table the best of the Observation-Disclosures
in connection with your home paper probably the most important
thing hoSehod-for every household, in facts the proper
keeping The only thorough system of Setstruclon
in Bookkering is the ellis is not only complete instructor,
but with neatly put up in box, saesbook, cashbook Journal
ledger bhead statements bank book bills payable and bills
cevab checks renting book and every conceivable appliance for
beginning and carrying the business of the farm, the shop the
mnuoy the More people fail in business because they
not keep their accounts straight than from any other cause
Farmers and mechanics husbands and wives students and profess
oung and old rich and all need some knowledge OF
accounting By the "Els SYSTEM this is easily acquired through
home study.
The cheapest price which this sold at retail is s75 express
from Michigan unpaid but The Cosmopolitan has purchased many
thousands of that may offer them if taken III connection
with this paper and The Cosmopolitan
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1901-02-14
Ms s!4AL
PATTERNS ~
A Realfst.

$50 you let your leading man go"
81 had to-" answered Mr.. Stormington
Barnes. "He was too realistic in his
IDEAS"
"Interfered with your work on the
stage"
"No, not on the stage In the box Of
6ce. He wanted real money. "-Washing-
ton Star.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1901-02-14

Why the turkey Is called turkey has
been much discussed without reachIg
any definite conclusion One theory is
that the turkey named himself by his
peculiar "cluck," which sounds like
'turk, turk, turk"
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1901-02-14
Excellent PrOsDeCts.

The Heiress-Oh. papa! The duke has
proposed.
Papa HIM. What are his prospects2
The Heiress- He says he can settle
with his creditors for a shilling on the
pound! Brooklyn Life.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1901-02-14

HE delights of evening spent around wl-ghted read
ing table are not half understood An illustrated magazine
with its wealth of Illustrations its stories of adventure ana
love- its descriptions of travel which carry you 10 the
ends Of the earth and its instructive articles for young and
are the first requisites for your enjoyment and the entertainment
and proper education of your children y .u.
To secure for you the best and most interesting OF the great mus
aed magazines at the lowest possible price has been the ann OF e
~ % necal contract recently entered into with The Cono-
noan which seeks to better known in this Has
enabled us to offer you years subscription to the greatest OF inc Illus
a1 magazines together with years subscription to this JOURNAL
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1901-02-14

Among the funny things women do, is
10 spread an old red shawl over the sofa
and put a candle with n red shade on
table near by and call 1t an oriental cor
ner.-Atchison Globe.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1901-02-14
THB PEOPLES NATIONAL FAMILY NEWSPAPER.

Published en- Thurs
day, and known for
nearly sixty years tn
every part of tho Uni
ted States as a National
Family Newspaper of
the highest class, for
farmers and villagers.
1t contains all the most
Important general news
of THE DAILY TRI.
BUNE up to hour of go
ing to press, an Agri
cultural Department Of
the highest order, has
entertaining rea d i ng
for every member of the
family, old and young,
Market Reports which
are accepted as author
ity by farmers and coun
try merchants, and is
clean, up to date, inter-
estlng and instructive
Regular subscription
price 81 90 per year.
We furnish it with
HE CLARION for $1.25
per year.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1901-02-14

ACCIDENTS will happen; by the pay
ment of very small sum of money we Will
sell YOU an Accident Policy that will guar
antee YOU from SIS to $25 per week should
you be disabled by accident.
July 29tf CASSELL u WAihho
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1901-02-14

B- INSURANCE.-Ifyo your Fire lnsur
ance is about to expire, call on US for rates
,uly22tf CASSELL & WATERS.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1901-02-14
All Three Together for On! 5 ZOO

One other opportunity offer you You wish tc keep in touch
with metropolitan e through the medium of great daily The
Thre-a-Week World of New York the equivalent of daily and
is marvellous fund of knowledge concerning the happenings of the
day. Each issue contains six eight pages OF eight columns each or
over cgt thousand columns of reading matter year In former
tNy3 this would have cost you probably much as 5000 year,
by Itself Now have it, YOU wish i'll connection with your
home paper ana The Cosmopolitan Magazine
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1901-05-10

Farmers are busy planting corn
while the ladies are attending to
their young fowls and gardens.
we are sorry to note that the
critical condition of Lizzie, the I3
year-old daughter of Jas. Hinton, il
but little improved, while little
Annie, one of the twin babies. re-
mains quite i'll. 1t will be remem-
bered that little John, the other
twin, died about three weeks ago.
We tender our heartfelt sympathy to
the bereayed and sorrowing famil,
IN their Affections and sincerely hove
that the loved ones who are now sick
may soon be out again.
Miss Mary Hinton, who has made
an extended visit to her brother,
Mr.. Jas. Hinton, will return to her
nome at Reedville in a few days.
Miss Bette Davenport, of Wicom
ico, is spending o week with Miss
Lula Barnes here.
iIopewell church was the scene of
q very pretty though quiet wedding
Tuesday evening when Miss Mar,
Elizabeth Luttrell became the brid,
of MIR. Adoniram j Davenport. The
church was very neatly decorated
wlsh erergreens aud towers of the
season. The wedding march was ren-
deied by Miss Edna Barker and The
ceremony was performed by Rev. j
W. Gee. May their pathway be
strewn with flowers and their skies
De ever as bright as on their wedding
day is the wish of their old school
mate, AUNT JAMIE.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1901-05-10

REPLYING to our warning lest
factional fights arise in the county
across the river the Somthside Sentinel
says:
We would not have our contemporary
entertain the impression that there is
any fractional fight in Middlesex
Prior to the convention to nominate n
candidate for the Constitutional Con-
vention from these two counties, the
Democracy OF our county favored earn
estly the nomination of their distin-
guished county man, Judge Evans. We
now favor our party's nominee-tbat,s
the kind of Democrats we are. AWAY
with your factions, we will have none IN
Middlesex!
This is good news, indeed; but no
better than we might expect from
the sterling Democrats of Middlesex.
Ills a pity they cannot instill some
of the patriotic spirit into the minor
lty of Lancaster. When beaten here
1T has been their custom to bolt, elect
contesting delegations, and such like:
and when they can't win their man
they have even labored to elect a
Republican over the Democratio
nominee. They can't take their medi-
cine like men and good Democrats.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1901-05-10
NOrthum berland Go
REHOBOTH CHURCH.

On Friday afternoon April goth a
large crowd assembled at "Paradise. %
the home Of Mr.. A. Hudnall. 10
participate in "picnic," given by
the Shiloh school. Picknickers were
seen coming from all directions, and
Judging from the happy expressions
seen, you would have thought that
they were really entering Paradise. -
ine evening was spent most enjoy
ably by all.
L. Z. Bland was in Baltimore last
week purchasing his sping goods.
Misses GenevIeve, Lou and Jennie
Ball and Howard Snead were visiting
in our midst recently.
Fltz Harding continues very sick.
Mrs, +. j. Garter, who has been
sick, is out again.
Raleigh Harding, who was called
home by the sickness of his brother,
returned to Baltimore last week.
Miss Bessie Harding visited at the
homes of Misses Judith and Mary
Garter a short while ago.
WATCH.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1901-05-10
SNAP JUDGMENT.

The action of the. Democ, attic
committee of Manchester in fixino
May 8 as the date for the primar9
to select delegates to the gnberna-
toriai convention is looked upon as
something of snap Judgment on the
part of the friends of Mr.. Montaeu
who controls the committee. This
only goes to prove the truth of the
statement / have frequently made
that there is not much in this CRY of
"machine!" The man who has the
crank will turn it for his own beue-
tt, be he Swanson or Montague.
When the delegates were being
chosen to the convention which NOM
mated Tyler four years ago the
friends of Hoge Tyler fought for a
primary plan which allowed minor
Ity representation among the dele
gates, and were successful in making
The Richmond delegation divided as
between Tyler and Ellyson. These
very men are now advocating Mon
agnes election and fighting for |
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1901-05-10

In REPLY to two barniug questions
agitated by the Norfolk Landmark
the Petersburg Index-Appeal settles
"these weighty problems definitely
and forever by explaining that "a
rabbit do wabble its nose because il
has no one else to wabble it for him,
aud the age at which pig begins to
root is the root hog age"
This may be accepted as conclusive
by the esteemed Landmark, but we
were under the impression that a
rabbit, having no tail 10 wabble, had
to wabble the other extremity. The
other point comes easy-the age at
which pig begins to root is when
he reaches the forage.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1901-05-10

Attorney-General Montague had this
TO say yesterday concerning the result OF
the Richmond City Committee meeting
Friday night: 81 am not at all surprised
at the result. was prepared for Il and
hardly hoped for anything else. "-Nescs
ITEM.
Happy is the man that can adap,
himself to circumstance, or the
politician who can take disappoint
ments as nonchalantly. 1t is passing
strange, though, how, up to the las,
day, Mr.. Montague and his friends
claimed the Richmond city commit
tee by Is or 30 out of the 80; and so
confident was he of winning out that
ne left the matter in the hands of
MS friends and hied him away to his
Manchester club to start the ava
ianche of abuse that would cover. as
with pail, Tom Martin the Silent
Virginia has heard claims before.
but the quiet ones usually picked
theplums. Since Manchester, Peters
burg, Danville and a few other
places that Mr.. Montague has claimed
are to speak IN few days we would
suggest that the Attorney General
have the above quoted words stereo-
typed. They may be found very
useful as the campaign progresses.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1901-05-10

~ fHVhhhE u H.
Darling Florrie, thou hast left US
How we miss thee none can tell.
Footsteps stilled, shine yet so precious,
Noice-now angels-we loved well.
vacant round the hearth and altar,
on there praying thou didst kneel:
Sod In death hr-t called thee, daughter
Now "e eN's; tAy presence feel.
Arms outstret; he'd, how oft in greeting
Dldst thou Deet ,ae at the door;
Now no more in happy meeting
Carst we kiss as Oft before.
Gentle, loving hands didst lay thee
Deep into the cold, lone grave,
Meath the tomb that we see daily
Buried there by Chesapeake's wave.
'ientle zephyrs DER the sleeping
Softly blow among the trees.
r~inkling stars their vigil keeping
Watches God the dead in these.
Look, We dead, arise in Heaven,
Break from deaths own savage bond
Ties on earth that have been riveu,
Sealed again in life beyond.
sorrows, pains and cares and grieving,
Mortal life no more will be;
Gods thou art, in Heaven singing
Florrie, child, we come Ia thee.
Dear ones droop and fade as flowers;
Bloom in beauty, wither aud die;
Buds are qulckened 10y the showers
Death so FITS us for the .ky.
Gods wise plan will bring together,
Child in death, thou you and me.
Love divine will then each other
Seal US for eternity,
PAPA
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1901-05-10
MARTIN ON MONTAGUE

In an interview Senator II. S. Mar
tin said:
81 have read with surprise the
report of Mr.. Montague's speech in
Manchester. His illusions to a Vir-
ginia senator, which were, no doubt.
aimed at me, were absolutely without
foundation. Mr. Swanson was am
bitiOus to be the Governor of his
State, and became candidate, AS
any citizen had a right to do, on his
own judgment and in accordance
with his own wishes, without any
lnstigation or suggestion from me.
1 have opened no headquarters any
where, and am not, and have not at
any time been managing or in
charge of Mr.. Swanson's campaign.
Il have not, | think, spent as
much as thirty minutes, all put to.
gether, at his headquarters since the
campaign opened. Mr. Swanson is
managing his own campaign, so far
as L know. Certainly, / am not
managing it. ] claim, however, all
the rights and privileges of any
other Virginia citizen, and have
chosen to support Mr.. Swanson in
his candidacy, because of my high
regard for him and my opinion of |
his superior ability, his worth, and
his claims upon the party. / have
not desired or attempted, nor have
he power, to impose my views upon
,thers.'
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1901-05-10

SOME of our State contemporaries
month or two ago took up with
a9idity a poll of the United States
Grand Jury at Lynchburg, as repre-
senting the Montague sentiment of
twenty counties in the State. Some
one called for poll of the Jury "a
to its members political affiliations.
aud the matter went into a somno
lent state. We would be pleased if
OR Montague contemporaries down
this way, who seemed to have lust
heard Of the incident, would be kind
enough TO tell us how many Demo
Gratis are usually found upon such
juries. Also if the anxiety on the
part of such Republicans for the ami
hilation of the Democratic organiza.
ton in the State is part of the politi-
cal ca ?ital of the Montague cam
paign.
Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1901-05-10
Friday, May 10. 1901.
A DIRTY BIRD.

United States District Attorne,
Hugh Gordon Miller, of Norfolk, in
speech at the Grant anniversary
banquet of the Middlesex Club,
Boston, after lauding Grant and Lee
and Virginia, took mp negro suffrage.
Among other things he said:
The principle of free suffrage
does not seem TO be applicable to the
section of the country from whence !
come. The Goebel law of Kentucky, |
assure you, was not one whit worse than
the election law now in force in Virginia.
Help us by your sympathy and your
good will, IL nothing else, while our
coming constitutional convention Crap
Piles with it."
Politics and elections are bad
enough at best, but Virginia is no
worse off In this respect than are her
sister States. This does not alto
gether Justify her, but since it is
true, there can be no excuse for a
Virginian, through desire to cater
to the craven appetite of his States
enemies, in holding her up to scorn.
This upstart STRIPPING, who has been
spurned by the best people of his
native State, does not hesitate to fall
sify in order that he may get renowu
among people alien to us or make
sare of the plums that are falling his
way from Republican administra.
ton. He has had a worthy predeces-
sor-John s. Wise-and there is every
indication that he will soon be as
much despised upon his native heath.