The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1901-10-02
RESERVOIR ARE FILLINGDUNNE DRIVEN 70 POETRY
THE EFFECT OF FIRE CLAIMS
EVIDENCE.
Some Strange Entries in the Notes of
Claimants Evidence-Compliments to
Witnesses.

Acting United States District Attor-
ney j. j. Dunno is a poet. His talent
was called into activity by some of the
queer claims brought before the court
of Chinatown fire commissioners, and
the queerer evidence offered in sup
port of them.
A few days ago one of the judges got
hold of the book in which Dunno
makes notes of the cases he hears.
| Dunno has acted as attorney for the
Territory much of the time while cases
have been heard, cross-examining
claimants. He kept a record of testi-
mony given in each case. Among the
notes opposite the claim of one Kalu
a Hawaiian woman, the judge found
the following extraordinary entry:
Your eyes are big with dreams Kalu
Your voice is music's self;
Your claim evokes mad screams Kalu
Your heart is set on pelf.
The Maui judge looks stern, Kalu,
He doubts your fairy tale;
| Some other tale go learn, Kalu,-
Now tale" does rhyme with Jail"
The Maui judge is fat and sleek
Well fed on poi and pisces
His leg you cannot pull, Kalu,
Unless you rip his breeches.
| Such interestin matter amid the dry
routine of items of losses naturally
called for further investigation, and
there was more to be found. 1t appear
ed that the judges were not the only
ones who had been entertained by the
| extraordinary witnesses, for the attor-
ney had sat solemnly making notes in
rhyme, as the best means of express
| ing his overlooking feelings between
cases. Dunno writes a clear micro
scopic hand, as small as print so there
was plenty of room for poetry. The
iclaims of one Moses Eleele showed the
| following comment:
My dear Mister Moses
The claim you now shows us
Is such as to pose us
So here my muse closes
oh Mosey, my Mosey
But you are blamed prosey.
Next came one ]. B. Moses. Some
of the evidence in his case was not ex-
actly to his credit, and he was not
! spared:
I SO here's another Nose
! To plunge us in a doze
| Won't someone get the hose
To wash away our woes?
You are sailor, Nose
And scorn the wind that blows
But blows upon your nose
On your just dues my Nose.
H. Lukons claim called forth Verse
as follows:
| Lukon this and Lukon that
| See such a pretty mess. oh!
This claimant was not very fat
But he was fat at guess, oh!
| A lot of Japs are Jumped together in
the official poetry. Comment on the
fact that, somehow or other, everything
they had happened to be nailed down
when the fire came, so that nothing
could be saved, was made as follows:
The Japs are real cunning
In fact very shrewd
Their lies may be nailed
But their fixtures are screwed
| On the stand they will swear
From spring until fall
That the same are not nailed
But screwed to the wall.
Not all the claimants are treated
| with such criticisms. There was one
whose honesty was so evident that she
was thought worthy of the following:
There is a young lady named Mary
Who speaks truly and doesn't get
scarey;
| oh she'll go to glory
For she told a straight story
And of honesty wasn't a bit chary.
The man who found these interesting
bits of verse in Dunne's book showed
| them to other members of the court,
and now the judges are advising the
attorney to take up the calling of a
bard. Il is said that there are entries
in some of the judges note books that
might show that they were similarly
affected by the tall tales of some of the
$500 claimants