The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1901-02-23
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

@-A -
Have you Moore's poems2'' inquired
the sweet young thing.
II think 50, miss; I'll look in a min
ute 2 replied the clerk in the book store
BY the way, here's a fine new story
just out. It's called Just One Kiss,
and
4 want Moore. she interrupted
haughtily.- Philadelphia Press.
..They have new barber shop in Bal
timore where every feature is run on
antiseptic principles
ITS a pfty they can't carry it to the
point where some of the patrons could
be treated to an antiseptic bath before
entering the place.''-Cleveland Plain
Dealer.
Snappy-That's what jars me.
Sappey-W hats that2
Snappy-Oh. some people are never
satisfied to take things as they are, but
always want to know the why and
wherefore.
Sappey-That's So I wonder why it
is.-Philadelphia Press.
SUSAN just hate these conundrum
fends.
Kitty-Indeed? Why?
Susan-Because the other evening Mr..
Stubbins asked me viii You be my
wife2'' and when I said yes he said
he would give me another guess.-De-
troit Free Press.
Rigby--EVas the banquet an enjoyable
one2
sturgis-From the landlords point OF
view, yes. He got a big price for a
mighty poor layout--Boston Transcript
..W3l you be satisfied with love in a
cottage2'' he asked
Yes" she replied confidently. for she
had heard that the cottage was located
at Newport.-Philadelph Record.
.old Crouch went to the masquerade
the other night disguised as a bear
Did anyone recognize him %
Press.
Give US a proof of your boosted wis
DOM cried a lot of chattering mag
pies to the owl
= viii he said. and few away
Philadelphia Times.
''She fell in love with me at the last
Covent garden bail, old man.
Really How were you disguised.
old fellow ?''-scraps.
Wife (severeIy)-What does this mean
sir? Do you know the time?
Husband-Yesh, m dear. 1 was (hic)
tanned, m dear. by fearfI axsherdent.
Wife talarmed and growing suddenly
thetic)-Accidenti Good gracious,
George, are you much hurt?
E1usband-No, m dear, fort nat'ly (hic)
L
(hic). -Me-Up.
He Feeling his way)-what do you
think OF a man who leaves his friends
and goes off to the north pole?
She (artlessly)-It depends upon the
kind of man you mean, you know. You
don't mean to say that you think of 60
ing, Mr.. Buffer2 Well, hope you will
have an enjoyable trjp.-Boston Trans
cript.
what did you expect to prove by
that exceedingly long winded argument
of yours?" asked the friend.
4 didn't expect to prove anything,
answered the orator 'An 1 hoped to
do was to confuse the other fellow. so
that he couldn't prove that 1 didn [
prove anything. ''-Answers.
Henderson 6who has Just bought a
new pipe)-Can. you tell me, professor,
if this amber is genuine?
Professor-Oh. that's easily deter
mined. Soak it in alcohol for twenty
four hours IF it's genuine it will then
have appeared.-GlasgoW Evening
Times.
Hoax-T went through the big locomo-
tive works yesterday and while I was
there I heard indications of a strike.
Joax-You don't say
Hoax-Yes; just as I was leaving
heard one workman call another liar
Philadelphia Record.
why do you have so many calendars
hanging around2'' asked the new clerk
That's for the benefit of my en-
pioyes, replied the foxy business man.
When any of them feel the need of a
vacation they can take month f.
Philadelphia Record
Don't you think that shoot rather
we'll. Roberts2's
Yes. sir! Oh, yes, sirl Indeed, I dun
no as ever see better shooter, never
sir. All you need, sir, is to it as well as
you shoot, sir. an you'll be winner
Scraps.
Theatrical agent-How much do you
earn at PRESENT.
Hamakter-About SIS a week.
Theatrical agent-About?
Hamakter-Yes-I get $10.-Ohio State
Journal
Little williee-.Papa, who is the best