The suburban citizen., 1901-03-02

whether to be disappointed or not. The
bracing air was laden with the dried
fruits Of autumn 1t had been smoky
in the city the afternoon he left. Here
all was very quiet and peaceful, with
nothing to break the stiffness but an
occasional chirp or the sound of falling
nuts. Jones was not an artist and he
had no eye for the picturesque. The
zig-zag fence and the tangled under
brush Jared upon his nice sense Of
order and regularity. At the end of
four miles he was conscious of nothing
except that the roads were abominably
muddy, that the tall weeds were wet
and that he was tired and hungry and
wished he hadn't come.
1t was still n mile to the farm which
was advertised to be sold. and he
longed to turn back; but he recollected
the yacht his wife wanted to buy on
time payments, and the automobile she
had in view, and the thought drove
him forward-there was no chance to
retreat
How dye. pardner" said the farm
er, who found Jones vainly trying to
locate the front gate by the dim twi.
light.
rs this the place that is adver-
tlsedY asked Jones, resting against the
fence almost exhausted
Il ca'calate it is. BE you from the
city?"
Il be-" said Jones, dropping into the
dialect of the place.
"Then you'd better come to the
house" The whole family set about
making him at home. They took it for
granted that he had come to stay
awhile, They opened some new pre-.
serves, and got out the softest and
most yielding of feather beds.
After two days Jones was surfeited
with fresh air, wholesome food and
simple, unaffected country manners.
He inwardly rebelled against brown
sugar in his coffee white butter, and
feather beds, and the only institution
he fully endorsed was the hard cider
barrel. He was shocked at their ig
nOrance of steam plows and costly
fertilizers. About the only satisfoss
tion he got was in telling the feats OF
famous horse trainers he had seen.
The neighbors came in to listen with
open-mouthed astonishment. They put
Jones down rs a remarkable man, but
the next day the oldest and LATEST
horse on the farm ran away with him,
and made him the laughing stock of
the neighbOThood.
Jones was mad enough to go home,
but that day his wife wrote a letter inn
ploring him to come back, explaining
that the hoTrid man wouldn't sell the
yacht or the automobile on time.
Jones answered with an cnthusias
tic prose poem on the delights of farm
ing. Jones was small man, and he
often found some dissimulatiOn nee
essary in dealing with his strong
minded wife.
Every day brought its trials. The
farmer attempted to learn" him to
plow, but gave it up Jones had fire.
quently alluded to the rough-shod agri.
culturist as a clod-hopper, but after he
had watched his instructor and then
tried a furrOw or two himself, he made
up his mind never to consider any
body awkward again.
That evening a letter from his wife
announced the engagement of the eld
est daughter to their well-todO grocer
of German extraction and further stat
ed that the other girl had a steady"
who was saving his money.
Jones congratulated himself on his
diplomacy.
Things couldn't have turned out
better; l still have my old position as
bookkeeper and I reckon ne -dn't he
afraid that the girls beauX will look
down on me. But what about buying
the farm?'
He approached the owner while sur
rounded by his numerous family.
you've got the best farm in the
State" he said, "and you are very rea
sonable in everything. You don't claim
it's the Garden OF Eden, but you ought
to. You've got the homestead shaded
W a eBA NhulhS vim anu lhC hhNh DOlb
near by--everythlng is as complete as
chrome. I'd like to buy you out, but
the fact is 1 haven't got the money"
"Why, we amt no notion Of selling
mister" said the farmer in an injured
tone.
Pm glad of IT, sir; but what about
your advertisement"
"Pshaw! we only advertised for fall
boarders."
Il see," said Jones, with sigh Of re
lief. IL must have stumbled on thu
wrong farm, but I'm blamed well sat
isfed. What's your billY
well, bein' as the puppy ct up your
patent feathers, Wen call it four dol
lars If you're willing"
Whatever you say" said Jones
counting out the money quite eagerly
i've got a hundred dollars, at least
out Of the deal"
Jones had a great deal to tell wher
he reached his fiat that evening. Tho
two young men, who came right regu
larly now, greatly admired the speci
mems Of mammoth fruit he hat
brought home.