davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1901-04-04
First publication March 81; last April H.
NOTICE OF HEARING

Estate of Michael Funk. deceased
state Of Wisconsin. County Court of Grant
County-In Probate.
Notice is hereby given that at the special
term q the County Court, to be held in and
for said coanty, at the Court House In the
city OF Lancaster in said county. on the
FOURTH TUESDAY OF APRIL, A. D. 1901
being the 23rd day of April. 1891, at the
hour OF one O'Clock in the afternoon. the fol-
lowing matter viii be heard and considered
The application Of Gay Landon admin
stratOr of the estate of Michael Funk. late OF
the town Of Little Grant. Grant county. Wis
consin deceased. for the settlement and al
Owance of his final account as such admin
strat0r and for the asst gnment of the residue
thereof TO such other persons as are by law
entitled thereto.
By order Of the Court.
f. b. GOODSELL.
County Judge.
Dated March IS ieni =
II. W Brown. administrators attorney.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1901-04-04
Facts About Fine Whiskey.

Not all old whiskey is fine. That
is unless care Is used in the selection
of the grain and water, unless the
most favora bic conditions govern the
distillation and unless the character
Of the storage during the time matur-
ing the whiskey is the best. it can
not become fine at any age. Old
Underoof can't be surpassed.
RUDERSDORF 4 KEMPER.
Exclusive Dealers.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1901-04-04
First publication. March q; last April. II
NOTICE OF HEARING

Esfafe-John Mcmahon. deceased.
state Of Wisconsin. County Court 81 Grant
County Probate
Notice Is hereby given that at the special
term OF tine county court to De held in and
for said county at the Court House in the
city 81 Lancaster. IN SAID county. ON The
FOURTH TUESDAY OF APRIL a. b.. 1901.
being the 23rd day Of April. 1901 at the
hour Of one o'clock IN the afternoon. the fol-
lowing matter will be heard and considered:
The petition of ". r. Richardson. execu-
tor OF the last Will OF John Mcmahon de-
ceased for the adjustment and allowance OF
his final account and for the assignment OF
the residue OF said estate 10 such other per-
sons as are entitled thereto by the provisions
OF the last will of said deceased.
By order OF the Court.
f. b. GOODSELL. County Judge.
Dated March IS 1901.
Herman Buchner. attorney for petitioner.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1901-04-04

FOR SALE: We have three very
>erviceable barber chairs. mirrors.
stands etc. that viii be sold az a
bargain HOWELL & STARR.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1901-04-04

Mother Willie. you really must 80
q tho dentists and have Two or three
teeth out
I5ttle Tommle-And l spo>e when
WIlle'S throu1h with EN- I'll have &c
use .em,-Chleago News.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1901-04-04
The Real Thing.

The Suitor-Here on my knees,
place this ring upon your finger. Ny
love goes out to YOU
The Coquette But how do / know il
is genuine?
The Suitor Ny love IS as genuine as
the Blush ON your cheek
The Coquefte Bother the love!
mean the ring. Chicago News.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1901-04-04
Hotel tor Sale or Rent.

Frst-elass hotel property in Mt.
Hope Is for sale or rent. Good build
ings, good, location. For further par
ticulars address, DAN SNYDER,
+50-2m Mt. Hope. Wis.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1901-04-04
Belgian Hares for Sale,

have some choice pedigreed Bel
gian hares for sale. Prices reason
able. For further particulars call on
Or address L. b. SHERMAN.
stiff Sitter, Wis.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1901-04-04
Notice to Settle.

All knowing them selves indebted
to me for dental services are earnest
ly requested to call and settle their
accounts at once. DIR. J. H. REED.
Soft
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17
HOW 40 CARY q Gun.

There are only two directions In
which the muzzle Of a gun can safely be
pointed; these are up or down. A shot
fired in air can scarcely injure any
one or anything and one discharg-
ed into the ground is equally harm
less. Therefore, in all the different
positions which the gun assumes, see
that it is pointed either up or down.
Sometimes a man will be seen who
carries his gun reversed, holding 1t by
the muzzle while the fore end rests
on the shoulder and the stock projects
behind. Happily, this practice is not
common, for it is extremely dangerous,
and many men have been killed by
carrying their guns in this way. If a
man stumbles or steps in a hole or
catches his foot on a root and falls, his
gun will very likely be thrown for
ward with the muzzle directly toward
his body and may easily enough be dis
charged.
Sometimes one may see boy or
even a man who will carry the gun
across the back of the neck, with one
arm over the stock and the other over
the barrels, sometimes with the hand
resting on the muzzle. This is certain
to give q very uncomfortable feeling
to any one who happens to be walking
by the side Of the person carrying his
gun in this fashion and opposite the
muZzle end. While the danger Of a
discharge is perhaps not great, it is I'M
pleasant to be walking along with q
gun pointed at your neck OF head
Forest and Stream.
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17
One View of Our Women.

American women separate them
selves more each year from the life of
the country and affect to smile at any
Of their number who honestly wish to
be of service to the nation. They, like
the French aristocracy, are perfectly
willing, even anxious, to fill agreeable
diplomatic posts at first class foreign
capitals, and are naively astonished
when their offers Of service are not &C.
cepted with gratitude by the authori-
ties at Washington. But let a husband
propose to his better half some humble
position In the machinery Of our gov
eminent and see what the lady's
answer will be. A New York woman
was transplanted to a western city,
where she was told that "the ladies Of
the place expected her to become their
social leader" 81 don't see anything
to lead" was the amiable response
From Eliot Gregory's worldly Ways"
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17

In the course of It's progress through
the office up to the issue and mailing
of patent, says 70. V. Smalley in The
Century, an application passes through
the hands of 80 persons. An applicant
pays SIS to have his claim examined,
and in case he is granted patent an
additional fee Of 500 Is required. At
torneys charge from $25 up, according
to the work demanded by the cases,
and as the applications number about
10000 yearly it will be seen that there
is a good deal Of money to be divided
among the patent lawyers whose signs
cover the faces Of the buildings In the
vicinity Of the patent office.
An inventor is not required to en-
ploy an attorney, but probably 80 out
Of 100 do. In simple cases where there
Is no interference with prior claims an
inventor can almost as well deal direct
with the government, but in most cases
the knowledge of the lawyer is valua-
BILE. He can study other inventions In
the same line and knows how to make
the claim of his client broad enough to
cover all that is new and valuable and
not so broad as to be rejected.
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17

With regard to the east coast a sorry
story has to be told. the county of
Yorkshire. for instance, from Bridling-
a. ton to Spurn Head. has been disappear
ing, it is calculated, at an average rate
Of six feet year. 1t Is said that care
full observation Of certain - mile
stretch shows that the cliffs 40 feet
high have been eaten away by the
waves for 132 feet in 40 years. 1t is,
however, at Spurn Head that the great
est ravages have taken place.
In Edward Is time the village Of
Ravenspur, seaport near Spurn Head,
sent more than one member to par
Lament; in 1899 and 1471 Henry "
and Edward Nv, respectively, landed
there, but very soon after the latter's
visit the entire town was swept away
by the sea. Today the village of Kiln
sea alone stands upon the head; the old
site Of the village, once fair place on
a hill, with fine old church, destroyed
by the waves in 1926, is now some
hundreds of yards below high water
mark, and when New Kilnsea joins it
the sea and the Humber will not take
long to destroy the entire promontory
and make things very unpleasant at
Grimsby.-Good Words.
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17
they Were Forminw opinion..

The club was full. Evening papers
were at premium. An atrocious crime
had been that day committed, and ev-
cry member was reading the account
Of the tragedy and eagerly discussing
the details.
A foot had been found In the East
river, leg IN the Hudson and the trunk
OF . body in the park. Loud were the
expressions Of horror and disgust. Sud-
denly a lull came over the crowd, and
two small voices were heard above the
modified din discussing the law Of hui
man nature which made people lean
toward curiosity even In its morbid
tendency. The small voices grew louder
and the argument stronger, until at
last a man in tones Of undisguised pity
turned to the disputants and said:
$50 you think we are filled with NOR
bid curiosity?"
One Of the small voices replied that
1t looked very much as if that was the
case. 49,, ,'-s-'..--
Nothing of the kind" expostulated
the former speaker. you mistake our
motive. We are merely disqualifying
ourselves for jury duty"
The men with the small voices imme-
diateiy seized the only two newspapers
and devoured them with avidity.-New
York Herald.
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17
BargaininR In the Orient.

In Smyrna, Turkey and Egypt tn,
bargaining language is about the same
"What you give, lady?"
II won't give anything! I dom
want it! What! Do you think
would carry that back to American
''But you take hold of him. You fee
him silk. l think you want to buy
Yer cheap. Only four pound"
-Four poundsy' / say in French
ooh, you don't want to sell. You wan
to keep it! And At that price yoy
will keep it!'
keep itr in a shrill scream. 'Not
want to SELF Me? I here to sell!
sell you everything you see! sell you
the shop"' More wheedlingly, "You
give me 40 francs?"
"No," in English again. 'T'll give
you 81"
America! Libertyw he cries, hav.
ing cunningly established my nationali
ty and fiattering my country with
oriental guile. How much you give
for him? Last price, now. Six dol
larsr'
We haggle over last prices" for a
quarter of an hour more, and after
two cups of coffee amiably taken to.
gether and some general conversation
! buy the thing for $3.-Lilian Bell in
Woman's Home Companion.
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17
HIS LIFE WAS SAVED

Mr.. J. E. Lilly, prominent citizen of
HapIbal, Mo. lately had wonderful de-
liverence from frightful death. In tell
ing of it he says: ~ was taken with Ty-
phoid Fever, that ran into Pneumonia. MY
lungs became hardened. was Sc weak
couldn't even sit up in bed, Nothing. help
ed me. expected to soon die of Consump-
ton, when heard of DR.. Kings New Dis
covery. One bottle gave great relief.
continued TO use it, and now am well and
strong, can't say too much in it's prsiss.'
This marvellous medicine is the surest and
quickest cure in The world for all throat
and lung trouble. Regular size SOC and 81
Trial bottles free at all drug stores; every
bottle guaranteed
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17

One would hardly believe that bot
tie Of water standing harmlessly on
table could be the cause Of fire.
Nevertheless such is the case. In my
laboratory the other day detected the
odor of burning wood and, seeking the
cause, noticed a tiny wreath of smoke
rising from the counter. Setting aside
a flask Of water that stood close by
sponged over the burning spot with q
damp cloth. Shortly after l again de-
tected the odor of burning wood, when,
to my surprise, I discovered another
burning spot on the table close to the
water flask. The flask was standing
in the sunlight, thereby concentrating
the rays to a focus on the top Of the
table, acting in this case as burning
glass. A handful Of highly combusti-
BILE material was thrown over the burn
ing spot, catching fire almost immedi-
ately.
1 cite this instance merely as warn
ing to chemists and apothecaries, who
may not realize how easily q fire may
be started in their storerooms by the
sun shining through bottles, TASKS and
carboys oy1iquid. converting them for
the time being into burning glasses Of
great power l have in mind now the
instance Of a fire originating in a
storeroom from this cause.-New York
Times
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17

One of Uncle Sans able seamen,
who was in an "Owp' train that was
wrecked, thus described his experiences:
at was a little after two bells this
morning and 1 was smoking my pipe
in the Owls stern galley. The first
thing knew of any happening was
when I was thrown violently from my
seat. After the pitching and jumping
had stopped, crawled out and saw
that the steering gear of the owl had
been carried away, causing her TO part
amidships. The after end listed badly
to starboard and went aground, throw
ing all hands in a heap to the listed
side. No lives were lost, however,
though all were badly shaken up and
somewhat damaged. One unlucky pas
senger hunted the glass out Of a port
hole, cutting her head and face quite
badly. After wigwagging the craft
coming up behind to change her course,
the forward end IF our craft picked up
the passengers and crew and continued
her voyage. As for me, will be glad
when l am safe aboard the Albatross
again. This cruising overland Is too
rough and choppy for me."-Argonaut
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17
Animals without Feet.

The hoofed. animals, like the horse
and the stag, have, strictly speaking,
no feet, for they walk on their nails,
and their feet have become Part Of their
legs. The advantage seems to be a
lengthenlng Of the stride, just as a
trained athlete learns to run on his toes
to increase his pace. There is also the
further advantage Of no soft part to
be injured by contact with the ground.
Some monkeys have four hands, which
must be a great advantage in climbing.
The absence of legs as well as feet is
an advantage to many animals that
have to travel rapidly through the
water or between the branches of trees
or other distractions.
Legs would be but an obstruction 10
the tadpole while he swims by means
of his powerful tail, but when he
leaves the water legs and feet Eccomc
an advantage. So the snake is able
to creep through underwood and into
small holes with far greater ease with
out legs, and even the slow WCilN
which seems such helpless animal on
fiat ground, can creep through hedge
with remarkable ease and speed. The
rudiments of legs are to lie found in
many snakes, so that there can lie but
little doubt that the absence of legs
has proved an advantage and that
natural selection has removed them.
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17

Iron for the blood has evidently been
prescribed for the quails of Florida; at
least, these birds are eating steel rails
on the tracks Of the sugar belt near
Runnymede. The report, which is well
authenticated, does not charge the
quails with actually swallowing the
rails, but it does say that they pick
away their particles wherever they find
a rusty spot where they are loosened.
From several points in the state
comes the report Of holes found in steel
rails, and In cases they are large
enough to seriously weaken the ma
terial. Where a rusty spot starts and
is picked out. it naturally holds mois-
ture, continues to rust, to be again
picked out, and so the work Of destruc-
ton goes on.
Railway engineers really believe that
the Quails take the iron tonic because
they are not well and find that it re-
lieveS their distress.
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17
Kiplins and the Bus Owner.

After leaving Vermont RuGyard Kip.
ling bought a place in the little Eng
fish village Of Nottingham, and in his
garden were some beautiful trees. One
of these trees, branching over the
road, threatened daily injury to the
driver of the local bus. Therefore he
and his conductor waged destructive
war on all the vulnerable twigs within
reach from the bus roof. Result: A
vigorous letter of complaint from Mr..
Kipling to the bus owner, who is also
landlord Of one of the local inns.
That evening the landlord laid the
letter before the select company Of the
bar parlor. They advised an attitude
of calm Indifference. Also a Cr9sus
among them offered $3.50 in cash fol
the autograph letter. Both advice and
cash were accepted.
The nuisance continuing, in due
course second and stronger letter
followed the first. The landlord con.
yened another bar parliament, and the
second letter also found buyer, this
time at So, as befitted it's increased
violence. And Boniface again "sat
tightw To him next day entered Mr..
Kipling, briskly wrathful. "Why
didn't answer your letters, sir? Why,
I was hoping you'd send me a fresh
one every day. They pay a deal better
than bus driving!"
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17
The Place to Wash Him.

On one occasion an NJ. p. of past
generation not noted for his habits Of
personal tidiness was visiting seaside
place, and one day while out in boat
with sailing party he was swept over
board, but was happily rescued. When
the excitement was over, a young fell
low rushed down into the cabin.
"By Jove," he exclaimed, we've
been having such an exciting time on
deckw
"What is it?" asked everybody.
"Mr Blank was washed overheard"
I'm glad Of it," snapped fastidious
matron.
Everybody was Mortified.
"Well, l am" she explained. Just
think of that mali being washed on
board" -London Answers.
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17
BLOOD

We live by our blood, and
on it. We thrive or starve, as
our blood is rich or poor.
There is nothing else to live
on or by.
When strength is full and
spirits high, we are being re-
freshed, bone muscle and brain,
in body and mind, with con
tinual flow Of rich blood.
This is health.
When weak, in low spirits,
no cheer, no spring, when rest
is not rest and sleep is not
sleep, we are starved; our blood
is poor; there is little nutl-i-
ment in it.
Back Of the blood, is food,
to keep the blood rich. When
it fails, take SCOTS emulsion
of cod1iver oil. 1t sets the
whole body going again-man
woman and child.
Wen send you little to try, il you like
SCOTT & BOVINE, 400 Pearl street, New York.
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17

A messenger employed at the railway
station in Praga, Warsaw, made bet
that he would eat at one meal five
fowls, a jar Of sour cabbage, two mel.
ons, ten pounds Of fruit, six cucum-
bers, with bread, and, besides, he
would drink gallon Of vodki (native
SPIRIT, six bottles Of beer and three
siphons of soda water. A numerous
company assembled to witness the
feat, which was successfully accom-
plished, and the bet was paid. The
man, however, was found dead in bed
next morning.-London Standard.
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17
The Englishman Caught On.

An Englishman on his first visit to
this city with his family strolled down
Broadway alone one night and dropped
into music hall. He had hardly been
seated before two sketch artists perpe-
trated the following:
Persif1age-Hear about Jones? Terri
BILE thing happened to Jones.
Badinage-No.
Persi1age-Yes. He dropped $50 feet.
Badinage-You don't tell me2 OF
course he was killed?
Persiflage-No, not killed. They were
pigs feet.
A half hour later the Briton grasped
his sides and startled the house with
an outburst Of cachinatory ecstasy. Re-
covering, he jumped up, hurried out Of
the music hall and soon reached his no.
tel. He stopped outside the door of his
room and gave way again to soul stir
ring laugh. Entering the room he i'm
mediately called to his wife:
Edith" he cried. ooh, this is the jol-
Hest ever!' and he gave way again.
His wife looked at him in frightened
surprise.
"Oh, Edith, did you ever hear about
Percy SmithersF'
mo"
"Bah Jove, the poor fellow fell $50
feet"
GLOW dreadfully horrid! He must
have been awfully mangled."
"No. He fell on $50 pigs" and he ex-
ploded again and did not subside until
a half dozen bell boys rushed to his
room to make solicitous Inquiries
New York Sun.
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17
Simplicity In Funerals.

The simplicity which marked the
ancient Jewish burial ceremonies has
much to commend it even to us. The
inexpensive coffin and the uniform
linen shroud served to emphasize the
equality of all in death. AS things are
today the rich tax their brains to In
vent new funeral iineries and the poor
impoverish themselves to keep up with
their Weather neighbors. - Jewish
American. .ssvss
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17

Miss Cardinals Mr.. Burbank q
man of family?
Miss Virginia-Not that anybody
knows Of.
Miss Carolina-Somebody told me
that he Is the father Of several chill
dren.
Miss Virginia-Has house full Of
them, but he can't trace their lineage
beyond his common old grandfather
Denver News.
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17
Time 1t Was Killed.

Particular Diner-This fish, waiter
Truthful Waiter (promptly)-Was
killed this morning, sir.
Particular Diner (approvingly)-You
did quite right to kill it, because it
had been on shore so long that it must
have forgotten how to swim, and
would have been drowned if it had
ever gone to sea again.
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17

The merited reputation of curing piles,
sores and skin diseases acquired by De
Wits Witch Hazel salve, has led to the
making of worthless counterits. Be sure
to get only DeWitt's salve. W. J. Butts.
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17
Otherwise DiscreetIy Silent.

McJigger-Bragg tells me he got mix
ed up in a scrap last night.
Thingumbob-Did he get the best of
1t?
McJigger-Of course. If he hadn't he
wouldn't have said anything about It,
Exchange.
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17

Georgia.. Points, Upper Sandusky,
O., writes: II have been using Fc-
ley's Honey end Tar for hoafseness,
and find it the best remedy l eve
tried. 1t stopped the cough immedi-
mediately, and relieved all soreness"
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17
Posted In Spite of the Rule.

Collector-I am afraid to present this
dun in person to Mr.. Grump. Had we
not better forward it by mail?
Manager-Yes, but remember this is
the only instance where we will violate
our motto, "Post No Bills."-Ohio State
Journal.
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17
Poor VILLA.

She Detulantly)-I don't ste why you
should hesitate to get married on $S,-
600 a year. Papa says my gowns never
cost more than that.
He-But, my darling, we must have
something to eat
"Oh, Willlaml Always thinking Of
your stomachp'--Life. -.
The Brunswick times-call., 1901-01-17
The Masculine Test.

Cholly-Oh, yes, young Getthar Is
rich and received in good society, but it
is plain to see he is not to the manner
born.
May-How is that?
Cholly-He can't get into hanson
without hitting his silk hat to save his
life.-Punch.
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1901-10-15

-'32sr zrta!.z.l n.a. sI5l Fea eree s...5.s- .... szV-ez!e5 70 Wt1e=e1Iorz +
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1901-10-15

enduring @ she burdens glven them Q 5e@f a2- aeq1ng taeueees g9-t good and women ought a-9
 
 9av raata-1ag the daily as and doing it with patience sonenfren5 4ad today while s also eeonpense of deserving a5o while less proPoT dorae actually greater ali material and spirit 1a than ever before 50 5a5 all may regard the past abundant gratitude and the future with absolute confidence threshold of the century still that HE HAP2IHSf OF POLITICAL FORTUNES IS TO BE N AMERICAN CITIZEN. and that fortune grow happier tha process The present paralysis of moral ,orag present coar oeraton corruption and fs kindred evils which threaten peace present animal for blood and general degradation of national spirit prove o De onlv temporary evils and will pass a4ae for TIT AMERICAN CONSCIENCE IS NOT DEAD BUT sIEEPETI IT, and even f not o children will return old ways and he od faith e repeat those inspired vors Of e first great American The nation shall under Sod have birth of freedom and government ot the people by she people and for the people shall perish from e earth