Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1901-05-08


musician? Yorkrode-Not yet, but the
neighhors are making threats.-Baltl.
more American.
Wigg-l understand you are related
to that pretty woman over In the cor
ner Wagg-Only by marriage. Wlgg
Who is she? Wagg-My wife.
A Possible Explanation.-'I wonder
why the Struts didn't invite us to their
daughters weddingg' Maybe they
didn't want us."-Chicago Record
Necessary Discretion: ~ suppose
you'll be telling people that Pm a fool"
No, dear; there are some things we
must keep to ourselves. ."-Tit-Bits.
"And so both your children are study
ing professlonsT "Yes; Louise is In
Boston studying to be an architect and
Tom is In New York learning to be
milliner."
Wife-It was very nice of you to
bring me this candy. Husband-Yes; 1t
reminds me of you. Wife-How gal
liant! SO sweet, eh? Husband--No; SO
expensive
49, AthiuihNh o1uiidiSp
myself a present of this music box on
my birthday" Sewing yourself airs,
eh?" added McSwllllgen.-Pltts
Chronicle.
bluegrass Arlstocracy: "And Is she
reckoned one of the arlstocracy In Ken
tucky?' "Oh, decidedly! Her family
feuds with the very best people thcre!'
Detroit Journal.
Mrs. Sleepyize-Henry, the alarm
clock just went Off. Mr.. Slecpyize (half
asleep)-Thank goodness! l hope tn
thing'll never come back.-Columbu
(ohlo) State Journal.
"My darling" he gurgled, II cannot
understand what you see In me to make
you love me So" "Well, Jack" she
replied, that's what pa and ma and all
the rest of the folks say"
Quickly Adjusted. Reporter-There's
a newsboy on the street yelling out a
lot of sensational stuff that isn't in the
paper. Great Editor-Gee Whittakerl
Then put 1t in.-New York Weekly.
Hully Gee!: She--I wonder who 1t
WIS WIN WfOtc OIluh W MIC Ouly Win
! Thine Eyes" He-Maybe it was the
same fellow who invented the express
sion: Here's looking at you."-Phila-
delphia Press.
"Why did they break off the engage
ment?" 81 don't know. saw panied
expression cross his face one night
when she asked him II Joan Of Arc
was Noah's wife, but, of course, a
trivial thing like that wouldn't cause
It,"
"You believe, then, after all, that
Shakespeare wrote the plays himself?"
She-Yes; but to make sure, the first
time 1 come across him in heaven I'll
ask him. But s'pose he isn't there?'
.Then you can ask him."-Brooklyn
Life.
The following call for professional
services was sent by local resident to
a doctor in neighboring town: Dear
Doctor: My wifes mother Is at deaths
door. Please come at once and see IL
you can't pull her through" kansas
City journal.
Too much of good thing: Jimson-
What became of that man who had
twenty-seven medals for saving people
from drowning? Dock Worker-He fell
in one day when he had them all on,
and the weight of 'em sunk him.-New
York Weekly.
''That Is a cosy-looking couch, old
man." "Yes, but never get near it."
"What's the matter?" "Well, there are
only three pillows that I'm allowed to
put my head on, and can't stand the
wear and tear of picking them out from
the other seven"
"Oh, no, they haven't always had
money; they are mere upstarts-got
rich during the boom period" I'm
deed? How did it happen-trust or
gold mine?" "It was more sudden
than anything of that kind; her father
wrote historical novel."-Chicago
Times-Herald.
81 see it is maintained by some peo-
pie that miracles still occur" $50 they
do. One happened at our house last
night. My wife discovered after it was
too late to do any ordering that we
didn't have thing in the way of re-
freshments around the house-and no.
body called."-Chicago Times-Herald.
Quite Proper Miss De Style-Oh,
I've lust planned the sweetest Easter
bonnet. It's to be Mrs. De Style
reprovlngly)-Fie l should think DUR
ing Lent, at least, you would refrain
from dwelling upon earthly things.
Miss De Style-Earthly! My gracious,
mamma, this bonnet will be perfectly
heavenly. ly.-Philadelpbia Press. -
"Good-evinin', maam," said the
tramp, presenting himself at the back
door, hat in hand. "Oh, you're after
somethin to eat, 1 suppose" said the
lady, wiplng her chin with her apron.
mo, maam; you're wrong, lady; don't
want nothin' to eat. All want Is the
,.,;,-oIona Of claaniu, In yoI1r harm oyar.