New-York tribune., 1901-12-22
DOCKERTY SAYS NO"
IT'S THE ANNUAL LOOSENING UP TINE,
HE DECLARES. AND MUST BE
PERPETUATED

IT'S nuttin' but a knock from de Yuetide
Knockers Club-dat's all 'tis," said Dockerty
soberly when he heard that there was move
rnent on foot by certain misguided people to
abolish Christmas.
Dockerty. perhaps it may be remembered. is
small and to some people inconsequential
human atom. in a blue uniform. brass buttons
and a cap something like an inverted cowbell.
Dockertys lemon in this vale Of tears is not
large or 5uicy one, but when he squeezes hard
he manages TO extract little Juice. Between
delivering telegraph messages from a Murray
Hill station and eating cold 'vittles after work.
he gets lot OF experience and It is Of kind
TO temper his enthusiasm and make him ju
1icialIy minded.
''Twon't come { nuttin, said Dockerty, with
the suggestion Of a frown on his hard little face
Yer can't pull Christmas like pullin' a cork
outer a bottle an let It go at that It's gotter
box fur de season. an when de season comes
'roun' agin it'll have de same perpetchal cinch
on good people il has now. No amount o
knockin' won't make no difference
Now as fer me- wot wild workin' in all sorts
Of wedder an bein' de oldes of er washn
lady in Secon' avenoo. amt got no time TO hand
out costly bouquets to folks wot go to der Joi-
man opery. but all de same know several things
about Chris'mus
'Chris'mus is de annual loosenin' up time, an
It don't make much difference how rich er how
poor a man is he ioosens up some at Chris'mus
time. Las Christmas Eve takes message TO
a rich OF man UP near st. Patrick's Cathedral,
N he's holy terror to his folks. He's got lame
feet an stummick difficulty, an his folks go
out an Iea<e.him alone nights because he's OF
an his eyes is red. Well. goes in an leaves
de message an de OF yells down de stairs:
Sen dat kid up sez he. Up goes, n wen
I gifts in Ge room de OF man is eatin' his dinner
of Of big silver platter. Well, sits down in
a chair quite close TO de OF gent, an first he.
aste me my name an den he says:
Well Dockerty. I'm lonesome an I've got
had case er indigestion tonight sez he, an I'll
be under oblergations ter you If you'll fall TO an
help me eat up dis here lunch sez he. An he
sent fur an extry knife an fork an spoon an
he Civ me de bigges half of everything 1 kin
still taste dem lam chops and macaroni an
cheese an peach tarts an coffee an figs an
grapes-gee, but il good. Dat wuz case
O. loosenin' up fer fair. While ! wuz putin 1t
away ne watched me. an Gen he said:
'Dockerty. dey amt nutttn in it-all dis dern
nonsense sez ne. pointin to de nobby tings all
around. 'Dockerty.' sez he again, if yer folks
don't like yer de wcTr 5 no good, sez ne.
Here am, an OF played out OF feller, wild more
money Gen / know how ter give away, an all
my relations is waitin' for my shoes Dat WIZ
a little too deep fur me. till 1 axed me mudder
later 7yot he wuz drivfn' at Help yerself TO an
odier tart Dockerty.' sez he, 'andon't be
askeered uv der figs. I'll hev James git some
more Dockerty' sez de OF man agin. it does
my soul good ter see you put away dat fodder Z
Wen l wuz 2 boy like yuse had jes' such "a
border ruffin' appetite. l remember seventy
year ago ter-night eZ well as ef twas ylsterday'
seq he An den de OF gent reached out an put
his han neck an snoothed me nalT. an :
ef ne didn't cry jes' like me bruoder Tim W en-
he's licked, den I'm a fakir. 'Dockerfy, SEE oe
OF man. tremblylike, jes' seventy year ago ter
night ] yvllz up ir de Berkshires an me two
brlidders en- me hung Cur stockin aroun de
ol fireplace in de kitchen. An in de mornln
Dockertv' sez he I had de nices' present IN
dat stockin' I ever had IN life. II wuz a pair
O. rediopped boots. Dey wudn't exackly go IN
der stockin' but dey tied TO it. w'ich Wuz
les de same An de boots had high tops, an
hrass foes SOS wen I rode down hill belly
humner N M sled'-dem his words-de
brass toes on de boots wudn't let de boots wear
out fas.' sed de OF man. An, DocherhS'
he sez do YOU know why l loved de boots more
den anytn else I ever had2 IT WIZ because
foun' out dat very mex summer, ven me mud
der died dat she had knitted mittens 10 pay fur
dem hoots-set UP nights by candle lleht TO KIM
rliftens ter seIl-lll fer me, Dockerty all Ter
me- s5d de OF man, cryin agfn.
We'll | begins ter git a little bit moisty my
self hv dat time an de oil gent seemed ter ferglt
I v-lIz there fsr he shut his eyes. an IN tears
dev les l1ed out De corners OF ms eyes, an
run down de cutters of his wrinkled Of race
I dro-ped er knife plate an Jared hlfn
an den he sez: Well Docl0erty, me boy, "isht
/ wuz youse an could have an appetite ike
vcur'n FL | gotn' out ne seZ DoCheI'+,
here's ? little present and de OF gent give me
FIVE dollar bill which helped ter pay doctor
for me Drudders whoopin cough, an ne mace
mo take a II de figs dey WIZ left an he give me
jackkraife to remember him by. Dat wuz ce
granGes' case o. lOosenin' Up l ever struck an
Il WI. ali or account er Chris mus. An oe M wIse
guys wot want 'bolish Chris mus dey wants
ter crush out der grandes loosenin' up perloa
OF der year
''Dey won't make a go of il