The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1901-02-27
Geese and Pumpkin Seeds.

"A flock Of geese may have saved
! Rome said the old granger reflective
/ Is; that was before nay time and I
/ wouldn't swear TO II; but III take my
oath il was the antics Of flock Of
I drunken geese that lost Amos Hoskins
+ his election as sheriff Of an Iowa county
I Although Of course. the cunning OF Uncle
I Billy wilson had good deal 70 90 with
/ the result
Amos was a good farmer in some
WAYS, but livestock and especially the
4 failings Of fat geese was not his long
4 suit When it came to local politics
( though. the old man was there with
/ the glad hand and an energetic hustle
/ Iowa was a prohibition state IN those
days and the county in which Amos liv-
/ ed was drier than a lime kiln So, = :
! drew near election, Amos enthusiastic
nurrahs in favor Of cold water grew
/ louder and more continued.
a few days before election Uncle Bill
/ " Wilson dropped over TO Amos place.
I Uncle Billy didn't have strong views on
the temperance question, but he was an
/ ardent advocate of Billy Wilson's right
to anything which WASN'T chained.
" And after you are elected, said Tn
Gle Billy, persuasive like, in the course
Of the conversation. don't you think
you wiz be able TO see your way clear
TO appointing me deputy? I've always
been a good friend Of yours
Wei, Amos didn't see il that way at
all. Uncle Billy might be a friend Of
his all right but he hadn't done any
strong hustling for the benefit OF Amos
Hoskins. This was the truth for within
few days Uncle Billy had thought the
ether side stood the best chance Of win
ming. Anyhow, Amos said, all the plac-
es for deputy sheriff had already been
promised.
"Unele Billy didn't say much to this,
but it was plain he was doing a heavy
stunt Of thinking. He kept his temper
though and little by little brought the
talk around to the subject of geese. OF
which Amos had a big flock It was
the first season Amos had raised geese
and while he thought the world Of his
/ flock he had q good deal to learn about
their habits. And Uncle Billy was right
there to teach him.
Those are likely locking geese, said
Uncle Billy rehectively. but somehow it
don't seem to me that they are as fat
as they might be. Have you ever tried
feeding them on pumpkin seeds? If there
is any one thing that gladdens the heart
Of the average Iowa goose itAis pumpkin
seeds
Amos said he had never thought OF
he hadn't raised any pumpkins that year
and it would be quite an expense to buy
them 50 late in the seasons.
Why, that viii be all right answer
ed Uncle Billy cheerfully. I've got lots
Of them on my farm and they're no use
to me. I'll send my boy over with
load in the morning
And If Amos had known anything
about goose nature he would have known
that while geese dote on pumpkin seeds
the effect on them IS the same as that Of
good whisky on q ran-an entangling of
the feet and subsequent enlargement Of
the head.
Uncle Billy having laid the foupdation
for his goose-jag plot piked right back
to the village and hunted up Elder Ben
ton. The elder was warm supporter
of Amos, but the chief end and aim Of
the elders life was the suppression Of
booze-made hi1arity.
It's too bad about Amos Hoslins,
isn't it. said Uncle Billy in sorrowful
tones.
THE elder didn't particularly approve
of Uncle Billy 50 at first ne replied, sort
Of tart-like, that he didn't know anything
out Of the way with Amos Ioskins. In
fact his life was more to be approved Of
than that OF some other persons who
weren't SO very far away at the present
time. Then his curiosity being aroused.
he inquired Of Uncle Billy the particular
reason why there was any confidence
coming to Amasc Hoskins.
I was told yesterday replied Uncle
Billy in his most doIsful tones, that
Amos had so much whisky in the house
that he couldn't use it up and had to
feed it to his geese. wouldn't have be-
lieved it, though If I hadn't seen It with
INV s-g-v
and corrupting innocent geese. and he a
candidate on the prohibition ticketn
"Ihe elder said that it must be SIAN
der, some campaign lie. that he couldn't
believe such q thing Of Amos Hoskins
Uncle Billy was mighty indignant at hav-
ing his word doubted
wouldn't SANDER any man, not even
a prohlbtionist,' he said in hurt tones
You can do down to Amos house to-
morrow morning, elder. and II the de-
grading and disgusting sight don't make
You close your eyes, you wiz see that
flock Of geese rolling about in inland In
toxicat!on
tine next morning shortly after day
break Uncle Billy sent over his boy to
Amos HOskins' place with n couple Of
bushels of pumpkin seeds. lie told the
boy to tell Amos to feed the seeds to the
geese as soon as possible as geese liked
them for an early breakfat. So Amos
hurried out TO the barnyard. called all
his geese together, and scattered nearly
r. bushef Of tire seeds on the ground Wen
pumpkin seers were tust what thoge geese
had been vainly longing for. They piled
right into their new feed Being full
grown geese. in good condition It was
some time before the pumpkin seeds he
gan to show results. But after they got
their work in there was no complaint
about the lack Of results coming either
from Amas Uncle Billy or tn geese
First a respectable goose, the mother or
q large family. tried 70 dance the goose
equivalent for the can-Can. Her coudi-
don being too wabbly for this she fell
over IN the dust waving her webbed fest
and squawkins dismaly The head g8n-
der ooked at her for minute In sol mn
disgust and then a sudden impulse to try
tie dy over the barn seized him. When
ne made the attempt he fell on his head
and after tryin gro stand on It subsidized
into bibuicus slumher. Every n euoar
Of the ouce resDectable flock. was fn
more or less principally more intoxicated
condition II was a regular goose orgy.
WHile Amos was 10 king IN p7rnlaxe1
amszernsnt delegation II the prime PAL
proaia.t.onists IF he soiintg headed hy
Elaer Benfon entered the yar3 The
sight which met thalr shocked and rrlev-
ed eyes almost 5aze5 them
70 mink that should live - Sos
she day when Size candidate fer sheriff
an ms ticket Should have 81 mach wt--
ky thnt be has 81 fed Il e. his &c st
exeiaine5 the elder ir nleus horre.
"Am0s swore thaf - hadn't given -
geese AIRY w5iskv I'm TIRE condition ~
his PEGS wac arainst bis statement
.if u wasn't ~ sizv. it was run IT
sin insisted tbs elder I've observed
gre actions ~ w'ekes man too eftsn MT