The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1901-05-22
IN A HUMOROUS VEIN.


}, IN A HUMOROUS VEIN.
Whe c's Mr.. Schnorcr?u He's
lhe next room Are you sure?
es, | Just overheard him taking
| nap."-Philadelphia Times.
She-lIow do you define rcpa,tcc?
He-Nc it's the thing that's Smar
when you say it, but impudcnt whc
the other fellow says it.
} A teacher was explaining TO a it'll
glrl how the trees developed thci
1oliage i'll the sprngtimc. All. YES >
said the little miss, 81 understand
Trey keep their summer clothes i'm thei
trunksW
A little boy, hearing some one re
mark that nothing was quicker thar
thought, said he knew better than that
whlstllng was quicker than thouuht
Beng asked to explain, he said: " In
scnooI the other day whlstlcd before
Thought and got a licking for it,"
! ti"tlctson-" am gong TO
meet my husband at O'Clock to selcc,
some decorations for the drawing
room"
Mrs. CattclsOn x" What DO YOU want
'ilm with you for7 . Well. in ease
they don't turn out right. can saw if
Is his fault. Life.
lherc's something in a shirt-waist
ihat nearly always appeals to a fellow. :"
cohllded one young man to another
over his glass of coco-cola. :. Ana
lhat somethlng," answered his friend
win glance at the table opposite.
nine times out of ten is girl.'
Hattie-l hope you don't believe all
rred' thompson says about your rood
looks and your brilliant conversation
and all that sort of thing.
Bessie-Can't say as do: but villa,
OF that? If he didrt ;hink rood
deal OF me he wouldn't take The trouble
TO Halter mc.-Boston Trauscript
llampsen--" hear your engage
mcnt with Miss Minks is broken Gir2
lows that?" Ilill-"Wen, YOU see
that beast of a parrot of hers was nj
ways yelling, " Oh, Charlie, Won
shouldn't llampscn--" But what
uiiierchce did that make? Your en-
gaSement was not Il secrct.'' Hill
mo; and my name isn't Charlie -
"iassgow Evening Times.
Teacher" Now, children, who can
tGll me what an epidemic Is? What
None of you? Let me PROMPT your
memory. 1t is something that spreads
Ana now--ah, see one of Won knows.
what Is it, my little fricnd?'' {" Jam
sir. SAN Francisco Examiner.
An lrlsh recruit was once brought |
up for breaking into barracks that is. |
getting over the wall instead of enter
ing by the gate. /" But, AIurphv.n
SAID the officer, "though you were late.
you should have come in by the uatc."
y llalse yer honor" said Murphy, -" |
was afraid of waking the sentry. =
Tit Bits.
Dear me! Have | got to write il
mYseli?' said woman at The Whist
Congress last week, al the GrcdrutIal
~. '"',V 'H' 'iio"Lu
,,Tnn,,, n,- ',''''o '''' "''"'cSS. us
,n,,,lm' w. '"'l,t.o' "v'"uS'' yo" see, en-
,rl ,,O' ", an, ''', '!o.l Ni'lclilha'l
- wen, interrupted INC
Clerk. i never can remember
W =" 'p'"l'' ''ieu INC "o'ni''i'--N
:.Do uo ii,
"o''io,' VINO nave had me adj
r"nI ~ ac'''liccu az, euuca'ioh make
r,'n "sNc" INC p"'hcI"r,
,nol. I,;, ''Ho INC pchc"lci
anal, nn,'G1,;am, o,,u Iiuc' "t'Gre nc c0"!"
,pa,'ry y ho aoin 1852, 20" ever
frnmo ~, 500, % 'u "u" ,inu occasion 10
iracicd s."o,o" C" - S1p,' , eAC'''c ior Pro
aa'.' 'e'9,' II "' ''ic cIuo you VIII 0ls
Lnor Co." ,"' ,n ~ - P9"S,DiG Ii; lor Il woman to
'' WV much -Lll'"so oS''
{, Woo :, - ~
=, Ho,
.;o,, ols"',i'S. A'' 'h'Fr'"S"S arc IpVc
g Is,7,, ,,o
,.o,, % 'A'' '"'''ei sweeping state
To on ,u
wv "' "i'' ihcrc IS IoNc OF adj
you SNOW, loVc OF luxury |
VI " ''i"inS' "i" various Olilcr |