The Saint Paul globe., 1901-11-14
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WHY DOGS CANNOT READ.

A great many years ago, even before
automobiles were invented Mr.. DOG uSeu
to live with Mr. Man. just as he does
now. Anyone would think that ne should
have learned company manners and know
how to behave almost as nicely as your
eldest sister when there is company TO
dinner. but anyone of you who is ac-
quainted with very many dogs will know
that he did nothing of the kind. This Mr.
Dog of whom 1 speak did commence to
learn great deal but he found that
there appeared to be drawbacks too
much
One day he was watching Mr.. Man
churn, when Mr. Man said that if Mr..
Dog wanted to have more fun than he
had ever heard of he would better learn
to churn. Mr.. Dog was always looking
for fun, and he said that would be just
the very thing he had been wanting to
learn for a long time. Mr.. Man rigged
contrivance at once, which made the
churn work beautifully whenever Mr..
Dog walked up little row of Stats. Nr.
Man said that the greatest fun of all
was to be tied fast, SO he tied Mr..
Dog fast to the string. Mr.. Dog walked
up the Stats and had fun for quite
while, and then he found that he was
so very tired that it would be more fun
to lie down and rest He called to Mr..
Man to come and let him loose, but cIr.
Man was busy having fun chopping wood,
and so he did not hear Mr.. Dog, who
had to keep on walking so that the Stats
would not slide out from under him and
leave him suspended by the neck.
After long time the milk was all
churned into butter, and Mr.. Man came
and let Mr.. Dog loose. Mr. Dog did not
even say much obliged to Mr.. Man. but
he crawled off and lay down and slept
for two days and nights without ever
waking up.
A few days later Mr.. Mans son Tommy
was working his best al carting apples in
a little wagon from the orchard to the
cellar He was very tired and wanted to
stop, but he did not dare, for his father
had told him to take them all in. He
smiled behind his ears when he saw Mr.
Dog coming, and he looked just as happy
as only a boy can when he smiles that
way.
Good morning, Tommy" said Mr.. Dog
as he came up. You look as happy as d
puppy with a five-pound tenderloin
steak.
"Oh, yes; / am having such fun here
replied Tommy. Then he asked Mr.. Dog
if he did not want to have some fun,
too; but Mr.. Dog remembered about the
churn, when he could not stop when he
wanted to, and he said he guessed he
would try to get along without fun that
day. But Tommy said that it was just
perfectly glorious and that if Mr.. Dog
would only try it, he would let him look
at his picture book. That sounded nice,
so Mr.. Dog let Tommy harness him to
the little wagon. Tommy piled the ap-
pies into the wagon, and Mr.. Dog had to
draw the load to the house, and it was
all up hill all the way, too. After four
or five trips Mr.. Dog became tired and
wanted to stop, but Tommy would not
unharness him, and so, of course, he had
to go on.
Tommy made Mr.. Dog keep pulling
these heavy loads until they had taken
all the apples to the cellar. Then Tonfny
embarrassed him, and asked him how
he liked learning to draw the wagon. 'I
don't like it one single Bit said Mr..
Dog, 'and I want my picture book to
look at So Tommy got the picture book,