The times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1897-1901, 1901-01-13
GOLFING ON THE MISSOURI
The Work of a Novice in Club of
Ambitious Members.
Something Akin to Ecstasy When
the First Obstacle Is surmOuntcd-
Characters in an Amateur EngnEe-

Being the timid member of a budding
golf club in small and ambitious West
ern town holds but few joys and presents
vista of trials into which happy igno-
rance alone will plunge without fore
thought. The greatest drawback to sue
cess is shyness which a relentless con-
science forces me to admit Is only one
form of vanity. This was borne in upon
me when. after reaching the first hole in
twenty strokes, exhausted. amid a cloud
of dust torn UP from the unoffending
earth, my caddie's scornful remark that
he, was in the habit of making that in six,
utterly incapacitated me for further work.
insist upon the term, although there are
those who play golf. l believe.
One first scents the golf grounds upon
turning the corner. by the Catholic
church, quite two blocks away. A small
cloud appears upon the horizon. which
nearer view develops into a swarm of
boys, varying in chocolate shades from
Allegrettfs to Lowney's, and appealing
wildly for employment. Not having a
heart of stone. l defer the task Of choos-
ing until the grounds are reached. which
entails upon me the escort OF the whole
union, for such has been formed, with
rigid rules. for the protection of labor
against grinding capital. represented by
the members OF the club. Finally closing
my eyes against their pathetic faces-how
their looks belle meni-I choose at ram
dom one who bears the euphonious name
of Bolie. 4 fascinating picture he pre-
sents for one not too mindful of clean
illness and conventionality-quite swamp
ed in a colossal pair Of trousers. reaching
up TO his small brown arms, his curly
head surmounted by faded blue jockey
cap, set at rakish angle. the whole unique
little figure enyeloped in halo of dim
pies and good-nature.
begin to feel almost gay at having sur
mounted the first obstacle, when | en-
confronted by formidable 'foursome"
just driving off. This party is composed
of the superintendent OF schools, whose
wife. brave woman, admits that she does
not like golf and prefers to adorn the
front porch In the absence OF Professor
A. who as a result has for his partner
a maiden whose enthusiasm in all direc-
her years until at present 1t amounts we'll
| nigh to frenzy. Against them are pitted
a professor Of EIusic and his charming
wife, truly a combination OF music and
learning which might awe drawer soul.
and | retreat to the shelter OF the hedge
until they are well on their way to the
first hole, or kopje as some warlike spirit
has named it. We have also Sunset
hole, and may well expect a Tientsin or
Pekin to next rise up in our path TO be
fooled and famed over.
AS | YEARLY work my way along. ac-
ceptilg with Joy the mud-ball tees which
the thoughtful caddie places In my path,
other members of the club pass me. The
tail cadaverous banker with his short
wife inclining toward embonpoint, but who
Is not content under her "own vine and
fig tree" alone Behind them comes the
pride OF the household. acting as caddie.
sustained by the thought that time, the
great emancipator will soon relieve him
| and cast his burden upon the younger
broker.
In the distance appear the fluffy white
| hat and rolled-up sleeves of ths pictur-
| esque girl, member Of gifted family,
whose talents. however, are somewhat
| overshadowed by eccentriclt.es. A delight
to the eye she! what need u sldll? Her
mission is amply fulfilled
The voice of very SIM b.Ick urchin
burdened by the name Of u: ,ses. drifts
ecross the green. He Is saying in tones
| OF encouragement to the young lady for
whom he is caddying I'VE are playing
| better tonight, arnt We Miss Helen?"
At length. triumphant I stand upon a
J bit of rising ground near the last hole;
but exultation is quickly dispelled and
| golf loses its fascination in the charm Of
| the scene which meets my tired eyes
| the winding Missouri. shining and peace
J full below me, bright tree-clad bluffs ris-
ing beyond in all the mellow colors OF
| early autumn. bursting here and there
| into scarlet flame, while at my feet lies