Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1901-12-20
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every foot.'-Exchange,
Charles--Did the tailor take your
measure2 Algy-I think he did. He
said I'd have to pay In advance.-Tlt.
Bits.
Brlggs-I hear you have been operat-
ing in Wall street. Griggs-A great
mistake. I've been operated upon
Harper's Bazar
Il wonder what papa always calls
mamma Honey for!' queried little
Margie. II don't Know" replied her
small brother, "unless it's because she
wears a comb"
what reform are you Interested In
now" Il am advocating that people
be paid double for the work they do
when they don't feel like WORKING
Chicago Record.
Il was in the South African war"
said one Englishman. "Generalf' asked
the other. mo, journalist "Oh, see.
You were reporter; not Il regretter,"-
Washington Star
An Easy Rule Hard to Follow: Rox-
It's easy to win woman's love; just
give her all the money she wants. Blox
You don't call that easy, do youg-
Detroit Free Press.
Rushed: Parke-Are you doing much
in your business now? Lane-Well, |
should say so. Why, we are so busy
that we employ man to insult new
customers.-Town Topics.
"How is brother, Tommy all In
bed, MISS He's hurt himself" "How
did he do that?" I'VE were playing vt
who could lean farthest out of the Win
dow, and he won" ."-rit-Bts.
Farmer Honk-Your niece, that's Just
graduated from the academy, does fam
cy work most of the time, doesn't shef
Farmer Flintroek an she don't
fancy work none of the time.
Faith In Him: Towne-Do | under
stand you to say that Spender's case
was really faith cure? Browne-Yes.
You see, the doctor and the druggist
both trusted dhim.-Philadelphia Press.
Interested Party-And so you are
married now, Lydia? l hope your hus-
band Is good provlder. The Bride
Deed he is, missus! He provided me
three new places to wash at last week.
Don't you miss your husband very
much now that he is away?" "oh, no!
At breakfast just stand his newspaper
up In front of plate, and half the time
l really forget he isn't there."-Ex-
change.
Beginning at Home: Jasper-I un-
derstood that you had turned over n
new leaf, and were even going to love
your enemies; but it seems to me that
you love no one but yourself. "Well, l
am my own worst enemy."-Life.
Sufficient Evidence: Sambo-Whar
you get dat chicken? Mark Anthony
Nebber you mind bout dat chicken.
'Tain't yours. Sambo-How you know
faint? Mark Anthony-'Cause found
hit in youah coop.-New York Weekly.
Here's distinguished scientist who
says that, after ALL there is nothing in
germs" Nothing in germs? Nom
sense! Why, look how much the doc
tors have made out of them. Detroit
Free Press.
80 sir, please, | have swallowed n
PIN" exclaimed a servant girl, running
into her employers room. "Never mind,
Mary" he replied, deep in study, "ney-
er mind; here's another" drawing one
from his pincushion.
"Those strings" said the first fish,
changing down in the water with
worms on the end of them mean dan
ger" "How do you know" asked the
other. "Oh, l can read between -the
lines. Philadelphia Press.
rs you gwine ter let dat mewel do
as he please?" asked Uncle Ephralm's
wife. "wha's you will powers" MY
will powers all right" he answered
"You jest want ter come out hyar an
measure dis here mewels won't pow
er."
"How much are you getting for that?'
he asked the man, who was moving
the lawn. Nothing" replied the man.
''Then you're a fool" Il know it; but
as own this place, and can't get away
from it, I've been a fool long while"
Philadelphia Record.
Kindly Visitor Mrs. A., what do you
suppose makes you suffer so? Mrs. A.
i don't know, l am sure, and be-
lieye nothing but a post-mortem will
ever show. Kindly Nisitor-You poor
thing! You are so weak that you can
never stand that.-Tit Bits. a.
81 think I'll have some of those cru.-
lers,n said Jones at the lunch counter;
don't you want some| NO" replied
Smith; "they don't agree with me-"
"That so?" Eyes; couldn't even eat
the hole in one without getting dys-
pepsia." ."-Philadelphia Record. i
Wont it be splendid when wesgan
talk ito the people on Mars,as exc clarI1ed
Mr.. Meekton's wife,. Mr.. Meeston
reused himself from his semi-doze, and
exclaimed: whats the matter, Hen