The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1901-06-08


how his father, his grandfather and all
the rest of his paternal ancestry hat
been suckers down to the parting shot
of II thank you kindly for your gener-
Gus attention and unparalleled good
behavior
Even on the heels of Watkins sue
cessful bulldozing Of the intrepid sat
urday nighters, Bill Hackney lost his
nerve. He was so surprised at being
allowed to get through three sentences
without bodily injury that he cut It
short and sat down Il think the best
place to use a club said he speaking
to the toast, Club Possibilities ana OPP
portunities," lis on this club Tom
AIcNeal turned round on him and look
ed threatening. III quit" shouted
Hackney and he did.
John f Switzer made the hit of the
evening. He explained why he was con-
nected with this Internal rabble" while
apparently talking to the subject OF re-
ceiverships. He FASTENED to assure the
visiting politicians that the event had
no political significance aside from the
fact that the congressman were expect
ed to exert their moral influence to pro-
cure berths as receivers for the Satur-
day Night lawyers whenever a national
bank busted and if anything stick after
settlement is made he promised that it
should go to their campaign slush funds
when they ran again for Office I'VE
have heard the rumor that this is the
ablest delega ton Kansas has ever had
in congress-" Congressman Bowersock
leaned forward interestedly and tapped
Chef Long on the breast in kittenish
fashion "but we never believed it,
Switzer talked some more about his
heart beating a tattoo on the inner
walls OF his pericardium, said it was
good to follow the Scriptural injunction
to do evil that good may come of it,"
and stated that I'VE love man because
he is not woman" He made a clever
speech and Tom McNeal unblushingly
admitted that that speech sounded bet
ter than he thought it would when he
(NdcNeal) wrote it.
Then came BOWerSOck and everyone
was ON the tiptoe Of expectancy. Some
wanted to feel sorry for him, because he
did not know what he had fallen into
But, as was said before, Bowersock came
armed, with a great big navy at that.
Professor McNeal tossed off some cheer
ing information about Bowersock's
hornless catfish, which, according to
Mr. McNeal, Bowersock crosses
with common house cats SO they can
climb trees when the KaW river runs
dry. He also said Bowersock was a
good euchre player. First he plays his
left bower, then he socks it to 'em with
his right"
The honorable gentleman from Law
renee gave the roasting toaster the lie
direct at once. He shot out his right and
followed up with his left. Il have stood
before a Kansas City, Kansas, audience
on Labor day." he said. But I'm your
hucSleberry.
When the bowling dervishes had
cackled a Few times at him and were
buckling up their belts to give him an
other shower of satirical hailStOneS
BOwersock continued: L thought of
some serious matter to spring on you
and haven't changed my mind. I'm
going on with my little speech"
"Oh, will you,' was the thought that
flashed through every Saturday night
brain. We'll, we guess not" Some one
made motion that the gentleman have
leave to print and roarS piled on roars to
howl the Lawrence congressman down.
IF you think you can intimidate a
man who has 200 pOstoffice fights in his
district, you have picked up the poker
on the hot end said BOwersock. I'm
going on with my talk See that" and
the owner OF the wonderful hornless cat
fish and 200 postoffice fights flashed his
pepperbox while the Saturday nighterS
made dive for under the table.
Congressman BoWersock made his
speech His subject was ''Woman-Her
Place as a Factor in the Home 1t
was filed with beautiful sentiment and
from sober feeling. when the still
small voice Of woman is at one end of
the celestial telephone and the millen-
mum at the other in the Providence of
God, they viii soon clasp hands" was
the pretty closing sentiment
Major Harvey came in here with his
toast to the Kentucky Colonel There
were only two in town" he said Col
enel Hughes and Colonel Jeltz. The
one has just been elected mayor by a
large and overwhelming majority and
the other defeated for county clerk.
Congressman Long, n ex-member of
the club, had a box Of taffy with him.
He proceeded to dish it out thick to the
hungry cluites. He drew the deadly
parallel between the club and that big
national club-Congress. Both have ex-
members. he said, in both the gentlemen
represent states, the eX-members try to
get back again, in both men are found
L. -
nothing about. You are a sea. Of roar
ing. rolling waves was one of his COM
plimentS with string to it; Il am in
a higher body than congress and a body
that produces congressman Qilze mel, -
another bit of superlative hot air that
Gained the seething multitude when it
was about to leap at his throat
Longs speech was long and Long and
effective in its satirical vein.
Congressman Jackson had to dance
as Logan. Chief NIingoeS-the last of mis-
race, the only Democrat, probably, that
would ever have chance to sit in COM
gress representing Kansas" Jackson said
he had a grievance That he had been
in town all day and had not been ap-
preached, like some of the other speak
ers confessed to have been, for their
speeches to print. He said while he was
a stranger the faces all looked familiar.
I've come to the conclusion that have
seen Them before ] once visited the
rOgues' gallery
Jackson said it was good to be present
and Bill Hackney, who had been re-
GREETING all evening that he had laid
down, shouted Great Scott forgot to
say thatl''
Governor Stanley said a few words ex-
pressing his pleasure at being present
He was slow to respond, having IN mind
his troubles of the year previous But
the gridirOn was cold by this time, and
he had an easy time saying that some
little nonsense was a great relish He
said he had forgiven and was striving to
forget.
Other talks at the banquet were made
by Justice W. A Johnston, Mayor
Hughes. John Macdonald, James A
Troutman, O. /. Clarke, travelling audi
tor of the Santa Fe; W. F. Smith of
Oklahoma W. F. Schoch. John A. Daley,
Frank r. MacLennan. r. H. Faxon
and w. H. Russell of La Crosse
The programme scheduled for the ev-