The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1901-05-02
THE CENSUS.

~ marked the genial census man. I'm
something like the smallpox, you know.
Hardly ever get here at the right time, but
folks Just have to take me when l come"
His darts of wit fell back, blunted by the
Swedish armor of the maid who stood inside
the vestibule and kept the chain on the
door. She had been too we'll trained in her
domestic duties to let anything past that
door, especially if it came in human gulse,
until the master or the mistress of the house
had so ordered, and to her United States
census taker was no exception to the rule.
She understood just what he wanted and
was quite willing to accommodate him with
all the necessary facts.
II know" she told him, solemnly. You
ask me. l can tell you"
"No, you can't-not for this kind of cen
sus. I've got to see somebody besides you
Heavens, girl-I'm no book agent, and it'i
hot out here in the sum-
He drew his wadded handkerchief across
his brow and tried to fan himself with the
lat black book he carried. The girl hes
tated moment longer and then fled up
stairs to the library, where Mr.. Slater was
doing in his armchair.
There's a sassy man down there she
announced Il don't believe he's census
man-he's too sassy"
Mr.. Slater. who had staid at home from
business that day because he was slightly
under the June weather, chuckled to him
self as he reached for his cane. That's al
right, my girl" he told Thekla. ''They gen
orally do get sassy about once in ten years
I'll tend to it." And he buttoned his all
paca coat about him in self-suficient way
and started for downstairs. The bathroom
door opened as he passed it; hand, clutch
ing cake of tar soap, and Medusalik'
head, with snaky, dripping locks, emerged.
did she say twas the census man, ia
ther?" inquired Louise. "I'm just washing
my hair, or I'd come down and help you. b
sure you get the ages right
"Humph" said Mr.. Slater.
Another door opened, and Mrs. Slater in
tercepted him. She was at the full-dresi
stage of her afternoon toilet. 'Who's dowr
there" she whispered, in the kind of 1
hiss that penetrates from third story tt
basement. Census man? | can't com.
down, you see. Do you think you can an
swer his questions?"
"Well, don't know why l can't" replied
Mr.. Slater, with some feeling. II haven't
lOSt IuS 6cLSeS "uCSo VIC Oou uCCu
petticoats in this" VI.
Come in, my friend; come in" he said
cordially, as he reached the front door ane
threw back the chain. Here, walk into tn.
parlor. Take this chair"
The 200-pound census man felt the demo
cratic spirit in Mr. Slaters welcome anG
settled into the gilt-backed chair with {
heartiness that made it creak. Three dirty.
faced, demure scions of the house of Slater
who had been studying this chained out
man from the front lawn, trooped in after
him and continued to stare with the calm
abandon of youth.
"say, but I'm glad to get I'M" began tn.
census man. Didn't knows l ever would
Beats all, the queer experiences We get in
this line of business. Mr.-ah-Slater, is it !
Yes, Mr.. Slater. What do you suppose
struck in house across the road? Well, sir;
there was a woman didn't know from q
piece of sole leather, so to speak. Didn't
s'pose I'd ever laid eyes on her. And after
few questions about her father and mother
it turns out she's an old sweetheart of mine
Hadn't seen her for Is years. What do yor
say to that, now? And she's got bunch Of
letters that wrote her once laid away yet
an her husband never saw 'em! How.
that"
Mr.. Slater always tries to be civil to PEG.
pie not related to him by marriage or other.
wise, so he smiled and expressed his inter,
est; but his face did not quite reflect the
sentimental glow of the census man, and
the other felt it.
"Let me have your surname, Christian
name and initial" he began, with change
of tone.
Mr.. Slater sailed into the answers bravely
| and kept afoat past the questions as to res,
idence, street, number of house, and SC
forth. Then he ran aground.
"Ma!" he called, stepping out into the
front hall.
A suspiciously prompt voice from the head
of the stairs answered.: 'FWhat do you
want?"
Come down here!" commanded Mr..
Slater, moving to where he could get sight
of her. Then he added: ooh, well, tell me
what day, month and year you was born"
Thought you didn't need any petit
coats" was the reply, to which Mr. Slater re.
turned silence. well, let me see," said the
voice then. "Joe was 80 the 10th of last
May. That makes him born in IS"
Gust Like woman!" grumbled Mr..
Slater, under his breath. always have to
count back every time"
"4ou put me all out with your impotence,