The Providence news. (Providence [R.I.]) 1891-1906, 1901-01-14
Wrote Notes to Editor on Both
Sides Of the Paper.
He WAS MUCH EMBARRASSED.
Tried 10 Make Apology for His Conflicting
Stories, but His Chief Was Too
Busy 10 Listen

when the major "swore" OFT on New
Years eve he took so many drinks that
il was four days before ne came 10 a
realization Of the dawning responsibilities
belonging 10 q man entering upon a new
century. Then he felt sort of hazy and
very penitenr
The Major was the police reporter on
a morning paper, and every year he broke
all his previous records on scoops and
spreos lie had meant to begin the goth
century in a way that would blot out all
memory OF his past failings, and pat him
in line for the managing editors place.
For that reason ne felt unusually de-
spondent as he sat in the writing room Of
the hotel in which he occupied an inside
apartment near the roof
The calendar announced that Il WAS
January 4. and the papers showed that
his competitors had had an unusual num-
Der OF good hold-up stories. The Major
resolved to establish at least one prece-
dent for himself.
He would tell the truth. He might as
well make fun confession to his city
editor. Taking sheet of note paper he
wsote:
a PENITENT EPlSTLE.
"Dear sir: My failure to report for
duty on your staf is due TO the fact that
] have been so drunk for three days tnat
j forgot there was such thug in the
world as the press. There is no excuse
that | can offer IL you decide to dis
charge me am sure that shall feel you
are justified in such a course Allow me
TO express my appreciation OF your past
ieniency. Very truly yours.
JAMES YELLOW PENCIL"
The Major turned down the page he
-piece- OF hlnl-pa paper -spread-n nnt before
him. Then he put his elbows on the table
and began to think. At first he felt very
yirtuous.
lie had been positively heroic in sacri-
ficing good position by telling the
truth. Presently he remembered that he
had not a cent in his pockets. IL might
be difficult matter TO find another job.
Besides he liked his paper.
He had homesick feeling In the pit OF
his stomach when he thought of leaving
the local room where he had so many
friends. He knew he was the best police
reporter In town.
lie began TO feel that Il would be posi-
tixely selfish Of him 10 deprive the paper
of his services. The Major weakened
every time he looked at the note he had
written
in fifteen minutes he had changed his
mind. He pulled "a sheet Of paper toward
him and wrote.
Dear Sir: Owing 10 a severe attack OF
grip have been unable to report for duty
for several days The doctor thinks /
shall be able to go TO work tomorrow.
When | was taken IN on New Years day
j telephoned 20 the office. hope that the
boy did not forget 10 give you my mes
sage. Regrettine that should have been
off duty at time when | know my SER
vices must have been needed, Very truly
your,
JAMES YELLOW PENCIL"
The ''Major'' out the letter into an en-
velope. borrowed a stamp from the hotel
clerk. and went to his room to sleep off
the lingering effects OF his spree.
BOTH SIDES or PAPER.
The next day when he presented him
self in the local room the city editor
summoned him for n private audience,
The Major" braced himself for an ex-
pI&nation. lie had lot Of symptoms that
he meant 10 refer 10 and he had practiced
hollow cough The city editor looked
positively approachahle.
He smiled when the Major wished
him happy New Year, Taking the
MAJORS letter from pigeon hole, he
handed II 10 his delinquent reporter.
(which am 1 20 take as the TRUTH" ne
asked.
The Major unfoided tho sheet of pa
per On one side was his confession. and
on the other was the note about the grip.
After pause OF some length tine city
editor, who had been turning the leaves
OF his assignment book, looked up at the
Major"
I'VE viii pass up the grip note" he re-
marked Go out on TINT West Side mur-
der story, and while yon are riding on
the Metropolitan l. just ponder on the
fact that many great men have been un-
done by TIE polite act OF letter writing"
The Major tried to make handsome
apology. but the city editor was too busy
10 hear IT,