davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1901-08-29
PITH AND POINT.

a slippery character will not I'm
sure you against friction IN life
Rams Horn.
Poetry ia merely a trick ST words
and the waste basket often takes
the trick.-Chicago Daily News.
Adams-"A money lender ought to
make a good reporter" Jones
"Why?" Adams-'Because he's al
ways taking notes."-Town and Coun-
try.
Hard work, long continued, kills
lots of men before their time" "And
yet what are these eight and seven
hour movements but trying to short
en- their days ?"-Philadelphia Times.
"You look nice enough to eat" he
said, admiringly. "Ah! now that you
mention it," she replied, Il wouldn't
mind eating a little ice cream
Philadelphia Record.
Up-to-Date.-"I didn't know Wheel
er was a college man." He isn't"
But he signs himself ga. Wheeler,
'01.' "Oh! the ''OI' stands for the
model of his wheel."-Philadelphia
Press.
Muriel - "When you eloped with
George, did you leave a note telling
where you had gomez" Gabriel
'Why, of course. How would papa
have known where to send money II
I hadn't?"-Town Topics.
Sweet Revenge.-Nebb-"You must
like to hear that dreadful grind organ
since you pay the man to play under
your window every day" Nobb-"No,
I don't like it any than that
! girl over the way who is taking vo'
! cal lesons.'-Boston ost.
Good Judgment.-Mr. Bridal (at
! luncheon)-'Is this the best salmon
YOU could get?" Mrs. Bridal-"Yes
the grocer showed me several kinds
but I took this can" Mr.. Bridal
did he say this was the best ne
had?" Mrs. Bridal-"No, but it had
the prettiest label" - Philadelphia
! prpSS
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1901-08-29
THE SULTAN AND HIS Wheel.

pears to derive great pleasure. His
latest hobby is photography, and he
has learned to focus properly, to
Judge distance and yer develop and
print.
The. cinematograph has found its
way to the far-off Moorish court.
Nothing that Europe or America las
since invented has given the sultan
more pleasure than the cinemato-
graph. He has had films of nearly
every pageant and principal event
that has taken place since the proc
ess was discovered revealed before
him, and has gone into ecstasies or
delight over them. The pictures or
the late queens diamond jubilee pro-
cession interested him perhaps more
keenly than anything else. At those
he is never tired of looking.
It is these things more than any
thing else that have aroused in him
a passionate desire to visit
He longs to get away from h dull
monotony of his court and to see
| the wonders of the western world.
But he knows that under the pres
| emit regime it is impossible. His pref
| erence for articles of American ana
| English manufacture is marked, and
| his ideas along this line are said to
| have caused great uneasiness among
| the French, who insist on trying 10
| gain his favor.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1901-08-29
FOREIGN GOSSIP.

The number of emigrants VINO left
Italy in 1900 was 153,209. OF these
only 22,696 went to America. Austria
got 44,916 on them, Germany, 1885:
France, $4,000; Switzerland, 27,129,
etc.
A wine dealer in Malaga is about
to plant 10000 coffee trees, as a
commercial experiment While Porto
Rico and Cuba belonged to Spain, cof-
fee culture a not permitted at
home.
Recent statistics show that the
average expense of living in Norway,
including the entire population. men,
women and children, is 160 kroner
per capita, or about $32 a year,
cents per day.
in Norway. The peasants have al
ways maintained their right to ac-
guire property, and have enjoyed
greater freedom than the same class
anywhere else in Europe. This has
prevented the accumulation of land
in large estates.
The oldest authentic specimen of
the bagpipe now in existence is be-
lieved to be that now in possession
of Messrs. J. &. r. Glen, of Edin-
burgh, which bears the date 1909.
It is very much the same as the
Highland bagpipe OF the present
day, except that it wants the large
drone.
| Utopia is now known to be located
at Orsa, in Sweden. The community
has, in course of a generation. sold
ST. 500, OGO worth of trees and by
means of judicious repianting has
! provided for a similar income every
so or 40 years. In consequence OF
this commercial wealth there are nc
taxes.
The entire area of Norway is abous
! $4,000 square miles. Of this GA pc,
cent. is rocks, "a mountains, gia
ciers and permanent snow and ice
! Twenty-one per cent. is standing tim
Der, 1 per cent. is hogs, Z per cent.
pasture, while only about 3 per cent.
is arabic land. Nevertheless, in spite
of this small area there are 146,ooa
farms by the last census, owned by
109, 900 different farmers.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1901-08-29
70 Carvn Camera.

The best method of carrying a cam
era is a never failing source of debate
among wheelmen who like to take
photographs while on their summer
tours. Almost every part of the BIZ
cycle where a Gamers can be placed
has been recommended. A careful
study of the question by the entire
membership of a large Photographic
society resulted in the unanimous
opinion that there is but one place to
carry a kodak on a wheel, and that is
on the rear fork of the machine di-
rectly under the saddle; the proper
place for the tripod being along b
upper tube of the frame. Many at
tempts have been made to carry q
camera on the head of the machine or
attached to the handle bars. This has
two serious disadvantages-the vibra-
ton Is the greatest at this point, and
too much of a load carried on the head
throws the bicycle out of balance and
causes difficulty in steering.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1901-08-29
UNCLE HrsAM.s OBSERVATION.

I've SEEM said Uncle Hiram, lots O.
noble men an brave
hrou 1es' one bit o'folly brought Z
ruin an the grave
Men rich endowed with honor. men
respected an revered,
whose qualities were envied an whose
virtues were endeared.
An yet they made a failure, much Z
ev'ry ones surprise.
But, my boy, I've watched the matter,
an in this the secret lies:
Ihey We're men who in positions of adj
vantage had been placed,
with a hundred dollar income and q
thousand dollar taste.
An my boy, I've seen them sinkin' I'm
the treach'rous swamp o. Debt:
We watched the ooze creep higher, an
the waters O. Regret.
An I've sometimes felt like CALM, as !
stood upon the shore,
Inc way out, ~fellers, lies in jes' re-
trenchment, nothin' more
sometimes I've even said 1t, to a good
friend, jes' that way,
An while he heard. he couldn't compre-
bend a word I'd say.
He'd keep IN sinkin' deeper in the swamp
o daily waste,
With his hundred dollar income and his
thousand dollar taste.
So I've learned a valued lesson that to
you / fain would teach.
Don't ever feed on apples that you find
beyond your reach;
An IL you've money jes enough to pay
for beer it's plain
You're dom wrong by buildin' up a kin
fer champagnei
You'll find you Uncle Hiram's right, as
on through life you go,
That some men live on what they make
an some on what they owe.
But the first class, though they're plod-
ders. pass the ones who've forged
III haste,
With a hundred dollar income and a
thousand dollar taste"
Roy Farrell Greene, in Orange Judd
Farmer.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1901-08-29
A ~HAIR-RAISIN RAISE.
Made in Sign Language by q Drum-
mer Who Didn't Know
the Signs.

"The biggest raise l ever saw in a
poker game,' said the doctor, was
when l was a surgeon in a deaf and
dumb institution in a western state.
Some of the inmates who held posi-
tions in the asylum had a little poker
club that assembled every Saturday
night in my office.
"One night while the mutes wei
having a game with a good health.
limit, a friend of mine, who was a
drummer for a Chicago grocery house
and who was at the asylum selling a
bill of goods, dropped in and wanted
to play. The deaf mutes made room
for him and the drummer was soon
deep in the game. The players had
some sort of a sign to represent pass
ing, staying, raising and the like, n
these terms were briefly explained to
the drummer by one of the attend
ants in the asylum who was watching
the game.
1.-THE playing went on steadily
enough for awhile, and then there
was a round of jack pots, for which
the ceiling was taken off, and it was
understood that everybody could bet
as high as he wanted to. On the last
of the jack pots, which had been I'M
usually warm, and at which consid-
cradle money had been won and lost,
exceedingly good hands seemed to be
held all around, and the ante was
raised several times before cards
were drawn. Four of the players, in
GLIDING the drummer, bettered their
hands, and they began raising each
other five dollars at a clip. The pace
was too fast for everybody except the
drummer and one OF the deaf mutes,
and they were left glazing at each
other over an uncommonly big pot.
1.-The symbol used by the deaf mutes
for seeing a raise and going SO much
better had been to wave the clinched
hand in front of the face. Ordinarily
the mutes merely made a motion Of
the hand in front of the body. But
after the deaf mute and the drummer
had raised each other a half dozen
times the mute after a long hesita-
ton decided to see the drummer's
last raise and raise back again, and
he made the motion signifying this
action unusually emphatic by shak-
ing his fist ~squarely in the drummer's
face.
1.-The drummer was terribly excited
by this time, and when the deaf mute
shook his clinched hand in his face
the drummer thought he was being
intimidated. He clinched his fist and
shook it right back at the mute. The
mute determined not to lose the pot.
shook his fist again, and the drum
mer reached over and brandished his
fist back and forth under the deaf
mute's nose. The deaf mute gasped
and shook his fist at the drummer,
but the Chicago man, now eXasper-
ated beyond all measure, and forget
full of everything but the fact that a
man was intimidating him. stood half
up in his chair and shook both his
clinched fists in front of the deaf
mute's face as fast as he could move
them back and forth.
"The deaf mute dropped his cards
and tainted, and the attendant rushed
forward. grabbed the drummer by the
arm, and said:
"sHeavens, man, do you know what
you've done?'
"tNo, what?' asked TIE drummer.
"sWhy. said the attendant, you've
! raised that man S75,000.'
anyhow the drummer got the
! pot"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1901-08-29
SULTAN OF MOROCCO.
He Likes bicycles and other Europ-
ean nnd American Inventions Of
Every Descriptions.

The sultan of Morocco, Abdul Azi2s
whose embassy to King Edward recent
ly reached London, is a young man.
and in spite of the seclusion in which
he has been brought up, is well In
formed, as information goes, in his
part of the world. He has no educa-
ton of the western kind, but accord
ing to a writer in the London Daily
Mail, is exceedingly interested m
London, and would give anything he
possesses to be able to spend a short
time in the worlds metropolis.
He is exceedingly fond of western
toys, and has a bicycle which he
rides easily and from which he APP
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1901-08-29
He SAW THE JOKE AT LAST
Took Him q Long Time But He
TunlbIed He Set Up a Big
Laugh,

When Sir Walter - was last seen
IN this country a friend took him to
the bench show in the Garden, where.
among other CANNES hat he much add
mired. was a coach dog, says the New
York Press. He had a good deal to
saw about this brute, for he had bred
such in Berkshire. The New Yorker.
who is fond of a joke, said: Sir Wal
ter, can you tell me what makes that
dog spotted?" The baronet launched
off into a dissertation of dogs in gen.
eral and coach dogs in particlar, at
tracing even experts by his learned
remarks on the origin of species, etc.
But the American refused to be salts
fed. He entered a solemn objection
to every statement of the noble Brit
isher, until the latter, somewhat ex-
a~sperated, draw1ed: us it possible
that you understand dogs better than
II" Will you do me the kindness to
answer your w question - what
makes a coach dog spotted?" The
spots. Sir Walter was the reply.
About half an hour afterward, as
the two were down among the terriers,
Sir Walter leaned far back, and, fac
ING the TdIteFS Win hIS upIu1uCd.
rubicund countenance, gave vent to a
series of "haw-haw-haws" that start
led the occupants of the benches.
"Haw-haw-haw!" he repeated, gazing
Through the skylight, and the dogs
| barked more. "Haw-haw-haw!" he
roared, and the bigger brutes growled
in derision. "Haw-haw-haw!" Pres
emily there was a crowd of several hun
dred people staring at him. All could
| see that he was a typical John Bull, and
possibly all believed that he was not
in his right mind. "Haw-haw-haw,"
When he got a chance to break in
the American friend inquired what was
the matter, and Sir Walter explained:
"You see, old chap, you Americans are
so deuced clevah, it takes us Britishers
a long time to catch up with you: I
am just now approaching what you
| said some little time ago about the
spots making the coach dog spotted,
and, do you know, my deah fellow, it
was bright"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1901-08-29
rome Is AUTOMOBILES Mad.

Automobiling in Rome has assumed
the condition of a veritable craze al
though the way it is carried on sfsihe
Italian city makes it appear thatfhere
is no sport quite so dangerous to life
and limb. 1t makes the o~plookers
blood run cold TO see a motor ear go
whizzing by in a little street so mar
row that there is no sidewalk, or pass
ing the opening of a side street full OF
cabs and bicycles, with no more 49,
parent caution than if in the ope-s
country. There have been several E&d
accidents, but they have no apprce
BILE effect on either driver or the pa
lie. The post office has taken up the
~self-propelled vehicles and will use
them for the carriage of letters-that
is. to convey the postman to distant
points. and in this way it is expected
hat the delivery will be much more
e~xpeditious. An additional impetus
was given to the craze by the recent
yisi, to Rome OF about so motor cars
ON their way south. To the great joy
Of the local manufacturers. all bore
witness to the fact that the Italian
vehicles are the strongest and most
satisfactory for longtrips, being light.
durable and comfortable.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1901-08-29
Hot weather sarcasm.

"Er-how do you stand the hot
weather." inquired the country
youth of the fat man in the side
show.
"Do you think it hot?" asked the
fat man, with scathing sarcasm,
which was lost on the country youth.
"Tve been somewhat chilly all day."
went on the fat man, as he famed
himself vigorously, and turning to
the legless and armless man on the
next stand he said in a loud voice:
"John, run and bring me my ~overcoat
and a couple of hot bricks."-Ohic
State Journal.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1901-08-29
HI G BICYCLE.
Il In q Unique Piece of Machinery.
Constructed Especially for Elk
hibitiOn Purposes.

Karl Jatho, the famous German
trick bicycle rider, has invented a new
bicycle upon which he and his sister
have already given a number of per-
formances in public. The gigantic ma
chine has two wheels, of which the
drive wheel has a diameter of about
sK feet, while the other, which is in
front, is of ordinary size. The frame
work of the large bicycle is so ar
ranged that it supports two seats, one
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1901-08-29
UNIQUE MONSTER BICYCLE.

on each side of the drive wheel. The
latter is turned by a double system of
driving gear worked by pedals on each
side of the large wheel. Each rider
is supplied with a steering rod with
handle bars, which work in sympathy
with one another. AT every revolution
the drive wheel covers a distance OF
about rs feet. The tire of the drive
wheel, which is the largest in the
world, was made to order.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1901-08-29
Hoperess Reformcr.

sIt is sad to see this mercenary
spirit SO Aagrantly manifeted In poll
tics" said the earnest citizen.
.Yes," answered Senator Sorghum.
'I have fought against 1t all I could,
but it's no use. / can't get people to
vote my way without payin' 'em."-
Washington Star.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1901-08-29

A fly is almost invincible. It win
survive long immersion in water, viii
sustain the doors of sulphur and other
disinfectants without apparent i'm
jury. Only ~turpentine, c~hloroform
and ammonia can get the better of .
ny.-Nature.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1901-08-29

Looking at the house from the
outside, Frank, you really would not
think that much damage had been
done"
"No, considering what might have
been, it was a very cheap entertain
ment."
"Don't be stupid, Frank. When
are the builders coming DOWN."
my darling girl. that is just what
I wanted to consult you about. !
thought that our wisest plan would
be for you to marry me at once. The
men could begin as 10 as we came
home from our honeymoon"
Frank, you r horrid. / won't
hear of it yet"
"We must have a roof on before the
winter sets in, but in the meantime a
roof is not one of the first essentials
to housekeeping."-The King.
The times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1897-1901, 1901-02-16
MORE CHICAGO FIRES.
Four BIazes Discovered In the Hotel
Majestic Yesterday.

CHICAGO. Feb. 15.-Four more incen-
diary blazes were added to the series Of
mysterious hotel fires today. when alarms
were sent in from the Hotel Majestic,
which occupies the northeast corner OF
the Great Northern Building.
Chief OF Detectives Colleran has de-
tailed six detectives from the central de-
tail to keep watch over the downtown no
tells. None of the blazes amounted to
much and all were put out before much
damage was done. All aroused intense ex-
element
Firemen who reached the Majestic be
fore Chief SWcen'e asserted that the first
FIRE was similar 20 those they had been
called to in the Great Northern and the
Palmer House and other hotels last night
Every hotel in the city had an armed
patrol guarding the Railways all night
long because of the attempt of an organ
ICED gang OF incendiares and thieves 10
burn the Palmer House, the Great North
ern Hotel. the Sherman House, and the
Hotel Grace.
Four fires on different floors were dis
covered in the Palmer House at the same
time. The most dangerous one was on
the fifth floor 1t was eXtinguished at per
sonal risk by John McNilliams jr.
senior at Princeton University son Of
John McWilliams. a banker of Odell III.
MGWilliaE-s was returning to college, af-
ter having been called 70 Odell by the
burning of the family home two weeks
ago.
All of the nres were started in baskets
of linen. Towels saturated with kerosene
were found. The fires were eXtinguished
by guests and employees. Two men were
seen running down enc of the halls. but
in the excitement they easily escaped.
The alarm was given SO quickly that no
rooms were looted.
Within "A few moments of the danger in
the Palmer Hot ., fires we're discovered
on two floors of the Great Northern, where
oil-soaked linen was found. Guests es-
capped from their rooms in their night
clothes leaving the doors unlocked. and
the thieves succeeded in stealing ieweiry
worth $500.
In both the sherman House and the Ho-
tel Grace prompt discovery prevented the
flames from making any Roadway and
thwarted the plans of the robbers.
The four fires convince the police that
an organized gang of ineendiaries is oper-
ating in Chicago. Good descriptions have
been secured of the two men who were
seen running from the Palmer House and
an array OF detectives are at work on the
case The police promptly informed all
of the other hotels in the city aud advised
the posting of guards, which was imme-
diately done.
The times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1897-1901, 1901-02-16

WANTED-Two unfinished rooms. heated; state
price and location address BOX 40, this office.
ml6-3
WANTED Any persons having windows 10 rent
along route Of inaugural parade address, giving
location and lowest terms, BOX 49, this office.
The times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1897-1901, 1901-02-16
ADDRESSED BY CHAMP CLARK.
Large Crowds Mt the knights OF CO.
Iumbus Fair.

great crowd attended last nisht S
session OF the knights of Columbus fair
ar Washington Light Infantry Armory.
One of the features of the entertainment
was an address by Representative Champ
Clark. of Missouri, in which he took oc-
casion 10 compliment the knights pres
ent upon their fine organization. Mr..
Clark also referred to the question of
granting suffrage to the residents of the
District. saying:
IF | sit in Congress long enough, the
tenure OF political office being so uncer-
tain, | intend to tackle the bill that | in
iroduced in the House some time ago,
granting the right of the ballot to the cit
liens of the District of Columbia. In my
opinion every man in America. whether
native or foreign born, owes IL to himself
and TO his country 10 take part in politics,
and assert his rights at the polls
The contest for the chalice grows hot
ter. the votes deposited at last nights
session making the score stand as fol-
lows: Father Dougherty, 56S; Father
Bart, 35L and Father Mulvaney. ISL
The times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1897-1901, 1901-02-16
TWO TRANSFERS MADE.
A Philadelphia Buys Washingto
Property for S72Ooc.

A deed was put on record yesteraa-
Davis r. Vale, conveying TO Wilt
Mccarthy all of lot l. square III,
herG's subdivision of the District
lumbia. The property is located
corner OF X and Seventeenth
known as premises 1901 X Street.
consideration named is $4,000.
Following the record of the above trans
fer a deed wss placed on record by Will
liam ;. Mccarthy conveying the prop
erty mentioned 10 Edward de Veaux Nor
rin, Of Philadelphia, Pa. The considera
ton named is the same as in the first
deed.
The times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1897-1901, 1901-02-16
aELp wAxTED-MALE AND FEMALE

WANTED-By papsrhanger. small shoproom at
= ~ per month if work furnished 10
pay rent: best OF references. Address Bon i5l,
this nffce. MI
The times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1897-1901, 1901-02-16
RAILROADS.
Washington. Alexandria
Mount Vernon Railway

from Station, Pennsylvania Ave and Is IL ST.
In effect November L. 1900
For .Alerandris- days. $50. 7:O4. 7:so.
500 S:S5. $3.50. 9:25, 1000, IL 90 so 4 m
xi2oS, 1920. l2:t5. xl:05 LES. 600 $50. z2:59
500 S;os, xi:l5 1885, $50, $40. x5:2t, 5:40,
SOY $50. 700. 7:3O, 500. $40 9:30. l0:l5.
ITO. and II: 80 p. m. Sundays 7:t5. 900. s:45,
1850. HOO. 80 a. m, 1900 noon Il 80, 00
l:JO' 200. 2:So. 300. $50, 400 80. SEQ $50
500. $50. 700, 7:S0. s:e9 S:85. $50. io:I5,
ll:2o, and 1l:5o p. M.
FOR Mount Ncrrou-Wcek days $50. 500 1900
HOO a m, xl2.05 xl:05. 200 ~ 80. $50. x4:I5
90. 1905 and $50 .. m. SUNDAYS 800 a. m
ED noon, 300, 400, 200 and $3.50 .. M
for Arlington and Agueduct Bridge-week
DAYS $50, 1:Oi. 30 500 s:35. sJ9 0:2j. 1906.
and Hoo a. m. 1865 1890. sI2:45. i,0s' '1:z5
zoo, 80. 2:5e. 1870, $3.50 ABS. $50. 5:24,
o:4' $3.50. 1:o6. and 500 p. m. sundays. 7;45.
800. 9;+6, 1000. Ii.09. aud 'II:31 a. m 12-O9
noon, 'l2:SO, loo, 'IsO 200 $3.50. SEQ, 800.
800 40. 500 $50. 600. ego. 200, 80.
and $500 p. 1T.
Parcels carried. Baggage checked.
xExpFess. TO Arlington only
6. T. ABBOT, President.
J. COLVIN. SnnsTintendent.
The times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1897-1901, 1901-02-16
WALL PAPER.

HAVE YOU BEEN to Our store? Well say,
We are showing the greatest display of spring
assortment Of wall papering in the city Hun.
dreds and hundreds OF patterns to select from.
Color blending our speciality. Rooms papered,
81 up. +. 6. NOLrE, s2i 9th ST. NV. NIL
ROOMS PAPERED, 81 up; only dealer who gives
a legal guarantee with all work; estimates fur.
nished: samples brought; largest and finest is.
sortment Send postal to
WILLIAM '. hAHONEY, COS Pa ave. SC.
The times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1897-1901, 1901-02-16
Piano HSnaDs."

Just received in exchange two elegant square
pianos and rs We are crowded for room will
sell them at a great sacrifice; one at rs, and the
other at $50, g monthly payments. +. G.
SMITH, 1925 Pa. ave. ml6-tf