Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1901-01-11


life. in pursooance of which object we
headed for st. Looey. We arrived
there on skedool time more or less an
there wasn't anythin' in the burg too
rood for us. Our blood was in condi-
ton to nssimilate any quantity of rich
ness without any bad effec's. We flew
high an never come down to roost.
All the same we struck hard series of
three-one deals an there was shrink
age in our assets by the end of the week
that would have had depressing in
flooence on the bank of England. We
could stand it, though. / told you we
had made stake.
"Well. I says to Joe: 1T amt no use
in spendin' our wealth all in one place.
Let's give Omaha touch of the sunny
side OF prosperity, SO we went on to
! Omaha and in two weeks more we was
busted. Not plum busted, you under
stand. We had about $4,000 left be-
| tween us. 1t was little over that, be-
I cause that represented the eXac'
amount of our investment. 1t come
about this way: We was settin' in
the bridal chamber of the best hotel
1 in the place eatin' our dinner, which
was roast turkey. l disremember the
name of the hotel, an don't see that
it cuts any grass with you men, any
way. said we was eatin' roast tur-
key an there ain't nobody can tempt
me to eat roast turkey now, l want to
tell you. | killed man with neck
I yoke in Pierre last year for Just offer
in me some. But then It was whole
lot different an that turk tasted good.
We didn't leave nothin' of it but the
bones, an when we had go, to that
pint Joe stretched back am lettin'
out all the slack there was in his belt,
which wasn't too much. he says: why
can't we get turkey like that on the
Pacific coast?'
THAT gi' me the idee. When n man
has idccs ii don't take stick Of giant
to blast them out in chunks that kin
be handled. / run my fork keerlessly
through my ha'r, which wuz longer
than what ii is now, an | says: why
not buy turkeys here, drive them out
to the coast an recooperatc our shat
tered finances?'
''Joe fell in with my scheme an that
evenin' we went out to the market an
investigated. We was in luck, for the
market was glutted with turkeys an
they was goin' beggin' at rs cents .
head l figgered that they would sell
on the coast for dollar a pound easy
an that they would average Ia pounds
in weight. talin' them all through. So
,ng hn4 ,t.IrN -, hs,
birds an started out.
"They was easy enough to drive;
there amt a more tractable or docile
bird on two legs than the turkey is.
If it had been hens, now, wouldn't
never have undertook il, but turkeys
is all right. 1 jest put bell on the
biggest one in the outfit an started
him right, an the rest went goblin
along after him. 1t wuz as pretty .
sight to see them turkeys on the road
as ever you seen in your life. Twelve
thousand five hundred of them, an
not straggler in the bunch!
'Fedd? Well. what do you thinkf
Wasn't there bugs on the road? I
reckon there was. 1t was grasshop-
per year, 1 want to tell you, and the
way those turkeys fatted up was q
sin to snakes. Fourteen pounds!
Why, there wasn't one of them turks
that wouldn't have tipped the scale
at 25 in week, an the bell turk an
the one that l strapped the blankets
an the cookin' outfit onto-I wouldn't
want to tell you what they did weigh.
mo trouble about night herdin'.
AS soon as ii was sundown they would
commenst lookin' around for place
to roost, an then they would fly up
into the trees, an we could rest easy
until the next mornin'. We took the
old overland trail along the Platte out
to Fort Laramie, an not a hitch in the
arrangements. We could see how the
folks in California was goin' to flock
round us with their dust when we got
there. We could see ourselves in ear
riages, with plug hat. an spike-tail
coats an bloodcd stock. IIah! Do
YOU know what that would have
brought us? lt's easy. Putin it at
the moderate estimate of n doller a
pound, an allowin' the average of 25
| DOllntS 10 lNe DlTNl, lUtTc we we're
with clean profit of s2475 on every
one of them, or a!'owin' for possible
losses by death CT misadventure, say
S30O,OC0 on the outfit. 1t was gol
burned shame that we had to slip up
on the deal"
The old man began to smoke his
pipe in stolid silence. and the stock
tender winlled at the stage agent. The
silence continued for half an hour,
and was then broken by the stock
tender remnrliing that it was about
time for him to feed them horses.
"Yes," resumed the old man. placid
Iy. "We slipped up on it., an il was
this way: You see, we had had lots
of cottonwood trees all along the
Platte, but when we started to cross
the plains to Green river we noticed
that the turkeys got bothered at
roosting time. They KEEP twistin'
their necks around lonlSin' fer some