Bellows Falls times. [volume] (Bellows Falls, Vt.) 1856-1965, 1901-02-07
MY M|CROB|AN DINNER
How a Man Thought He Could Do
Woman's Work and Was
Disappointed.
BY CATHERINE LOUISE SMITH.

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81 wonder, Thaddeus," said my wife
doubtfully, giving me a searchlight
look, ''if you could get your own dinner
tonight. l want to go to a meeting of
the Suffrage club, and the maid is 60.
ing out"
Now, it has always seemed to me
that the more man asserts his indie
pendence the better. l felt pretty
doubtful about that dinner, but l
wasn't going to let Maria know l had
any qualms. 1 remembered, too, l had
managed well at bachelor housekeep-
Ing for few weeks. l had everything
convenient; never made the beds be-
cause 1t was so well to let them air
thoroughly, and because believed in
consolidation and that in union there
is strength I did not wash my dishes,
but let them collect and the day before
my mother returned put them in tub
and turned the hose on them.
The success of this venture embold-
ened me to try again, but for reasons
best known to my own soul did not
tell Maria. 1 simply said could man.
age and would really enjoy the novel
performance of getting my own dinner
and that it would by no means prove
fatal. l resolved two things firmly
that I should have good dinner ire
spective Of the germ theory, microbes
and bacilli and that the dinner should
be at o'clock promptly. This not hav-
ing meals on time, l felt, was all non
sense, and while Maria was away was
surely the time to indulge in microbes,
for she feared them SO she had given
me restricted diet. That day 1 left
the Office at 4 o'clock. had been think
ing at intervals during the day what
should have for that dinner. 1 even
meditated corned beef, cabbage, mince
pie and doughnuts. All of them would
make myself after 1 left the office.
l procured on the way home the
necessary supplies. An alluring dis
play met my eyes. I went into the
market and purchased nice plate
piece of corned beef. l was about to
tell the butcher I would carry it with
me for my o'clock dinner when the
butcher, who knew me pretty well,
assured me that the corned beef had
to boil a number of hours to be done.
In the reaction which followed this an
nouncement | remembered that he
could send it for the next day; l had
meant that all along" and l hastily
purchased some oysters and lamb
chops. 81 will have oyster soup for
the first course" said l to myself, land
chops and tomatoes for the second If
that won't be good, don't know what
will"
1t was o'clock when I got home.
1t was SO lonely without Maria that l
thought l had better start the dinner
at once; besides, wanted that meal
at o'clock sharp. Maria had about
bothered the life out of me by not
having meals on time. / lighted
the burners on the gas stove, and !
decided to make biscuit, mince pie
and doughnuts, besides cooking the
oysters and the meat. By $50 I was
just enjoying the thing. had the milk
for the oysters contentedly boiling on
one of the burners, and the others had
been blazing for some time, all ready
for use when wanted. The first thing
l did was to find a cookbook.
/ ran down the index through pump
kin, lemon, carrot, eustard, until / got
to mince pie. This l read carefully
Then 1 sadly closed the book. Mince
pie required cold meat, apples and q
thousand other things and could not
be made in an impromptu manner
and at 6 l must have that dinner.
felt distressed, but there were still the
doughnuts. / was just in the midst
of discovering it would take at least
good two hours to make doughnuts
when, by thunder, didn't that milh
boil over! felt like going through the
whole litany. l rushed to the stove
seized my. clean handkerchief and had
just made up my mind that the milk
must be done enough for the oysters
when l discovered the handkerchief
was done also.
The crisis being past, decided tt
make my biscuit. l thought this time
1 would not consult the cookbook, fol
it was getting along toward 6, and il
took too long to hunt up recipes.
put a great deal of -four in a small
bowl, dumped in some water, and pro
ceeded to mold it all into shape al
1 had seen Maria often do. In the
interim talked to myself.
SCI know all about this" l said witt