The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1901-10-26
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES
= HER POINT OF VIEW 3:
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wish had an automobile
She walled in ycarning tone.
L.. "Wih glittcring hoX and plump little
~ Wheel
And seat ior two alone.
ooh, yes, know they will cheaper grow
And safer a, years go by;
But what ii its so that they upward blow.
| want one now while they're high.
There is nothing which really gets
such hold on n person rs the desire
to possess Il ''mobie'' Of some kind,
auto, loco. presto -busto or whatever
it may chance to be called. 1t is like
the morphine or the golf habit once 1t
really has grip. and even the cXplo-
sion of all the machines of ones ac-
Quaintancc seems TO have 70 detcrring
effect.
Did YOU ever notice that nobody ever
seems to be absolutely blown up in an
auto explosion? 1t may turn somer-
saults and finish you, or it may run
violently down steep place like the
swine in the Bible. on it may everlast-
insly oXterminate its ownself. but it
isseldom known to explode and kill its
keeper. 1t may bc this fact which en-
courages people to buy another auto
mobile as fast as the last one takes ilrc
and vanishes-that and the insurance
they get. lin sure I don't understand
how it is that insurance companies con-
tinue to assume such risks. 7 am in
formed that it is the fate of all auto
mobiles. like all powder mills, to en-
plode sooner or later. generally speak
they are run by means of gasoline. and
it is really pathetic, but most of us
are willing to take our chances.
The people who own these coveted
machines arc hanpy-at times. There
is one little lady who declares that rid
ing in your own automobile is like
heaven and she will be tolerably con-
tent if the abode of the blcst is as sat
isfying by the way. just now she
happens To be walking in common with
the great majority, only her reason has
nothing to do with strikes.
y certain resident OF this city has
built a large and expensive stable
around his horseleSs carriage. Most of
his waking hours aside from business
are spent in that stable. He thought
1t would be Il nice place in which to
practice with his machine. and it was
for Il while. He had an ingenious
arrangement which lifted the auto and
allowed the wheels to go round after
the fashion of the exhibits OF such ve-
hcles at the Pan American. This en-
hblcd him to nccustom himself to the
levers here, the gauges there. the
brakes fore and aft and the trills to
III" SlarbOard. He padded away to
his intense satisfaction and everything
worked beautifully Finally there came
day when he knew that he was an
expert chauffeur and he dropped the
auto to the floor and proceeded TO take
Il little spiH in the barn preliminary
to a ride to Lake Scranton. The spin
lasted Just two minutes. At the cX-
pira,ion of that time the machine, with
II perVersitS cuualled only by woman,
insisted on going backward with such
vehemence that the rear end Of the
barn was a wreck and the wheels We're
square. if not fiat.
Then ensued more dry dock expert
menting, and after Il time he did be-
come very proficient in automobilins.
one day. however. a catastrophe was
narrowly avcrted when he had start
noon iaunt ana when the fashionable
street ON which he lives was ,hronged
with Interested spectators. They were
greatly edited at seeing him proceed
down Il stecu grade with the machine
going backward at II rapid pace which
did not lessen approciably as it side
tracked itself over the curb and
climbed up n ncighhor'S tree. The
owner promptly stood on his head. az
no provision had been made in The
autos economy for Il loop the loop"
or course, it was a mir
aclr that the whole outfit was not
blown mp or burned up. Crho only
worse thing than possessing AN auto
mobile Of Your own is to live next door
to nelehbor who has onel
Automobiles certainly relieve life of a
great deal of nonotony. When your
station in life is such that YOU must
depend on horses ANA carriages for
conveyance, YOU touch q button and
the cOaChman is certain To appear in
Il given time. II he doesn't, YOU want
to know the reason why. lie always
turns the rorner at Just such an angle
and just such a pace. He brings the
horses to Il standstill at precisely the
same spot where they have stopped
for years and you step into your car
riage from the same nlace. With an
1t is different. No more
touching of buttons and bells. The
head of the household signifies his
gracious intention of taking YOU out
for spin and YOU ara duly grateful
Wcrhaps). You array Yourself in your
preltiest things and sit down patiently
and await Your lord and master. lie is
seldom presentable nowadays when at
home ana must generally he excused
when callers arrive. lie wears dis
clothing and looks not so
much brother to the oX--as Ia the man
who cleans sewers. The odur which
pervades his immediate vicinity is Il
cross between an cmployc OF the
standard Oil company and machin-
lists apprentice.
II used TO be Your custom TO keep
other people waiting, We have changed
all that. The automobile must not be
DELAYED when il dashes 10 the door
fussing ana fuminG. You feel that II
is imperative to step lively" as the
street car conductors used to say, or
the thing viii begin to swear. SO YOU
step lively. There Is always the con-