Arizona republican., 1901-07-28

:. N ..S '.,sF'' LITTLE JAMES
(The Drawing of the Line at Iron
 Springs.)

(The Drawing of the Line at Iron Springs.)
 | Irn Springs Is place where tn
 people of Fenix go to put themselves
 In Coal Storidge so's they'll last over Summer. Guvher Hugus at Tucson he sex, Come to Tucson. it's tn best place l in Arizona to arrest Decomposishun. We can't put you on Ice becos we aint got none. but we'll fix you sos you can't Spoil The Fenix People they ses, No we don't want to be Pride. Of course that'd be Preservative, but 1t would destroy our Fucher Usefulness. A man whose brains has been Baked aint no good" Er
 So the F'enix Fokes they went to 1rn Springs. They got lots O Atmosphere there of th' Right Kind, becos they aint no Wether Burro nearer'n Fenix. It's wot my Paw sez Is Happy Commun- ity, with only one Drawback. They aint no place where you can go and Have Somethin' with fren'. They's good deal of Licker Imported In Va lises, but 1t has to be Drunk in tn Bosom of tn Fambly, an you can't leeee your Cottidge fer hours after ward fer Feer yer Breth will Faint tn Air an Committy will Wait on you an tell you you've been Ostrichized an 'il haf to take tn mex Trane fer Fenix.
 They's a good deal of Society at Irn Springs an Its Fenix's best. They don't allow no Scrubs if they can help It. Whenever they see Trane Comin' fun tn South they hold a Lection, an if they's, two Black Balls cast they signle the Trane to go on without Stoppin'.
 One Fenix man took Cat up to Irn Springs to be Compny fer his Childern. The Cat staid two days an then he sez to hisself: This Is no Place fer me. Tn Orkestry aint Pitched high Enuff. 1 gess III go back to Fenix where they's some Life an Music. That Climit soots me all Rite l aint no Migertory Burd, anyhow An tn Cat Come Back.
 About that time they was Girl in Preskitt whose fambly had six Young Cats which s,th' $ Girls Mother .'sed Flooded th' Market. One Mite when tn Girl was gcin' down to Irn Springs to Danst her Mother sez: "Gwendo- Tyne, I wisht you would take Those Cats along an drop '-sn out of tn Car Winder." Gwendolyne's Young Man. he sez: That's Esy. I'll Fix it." He put tn Cats in Bag an carried 'em into tn Trane. He set 'em in front of tn Sect where. Him an Gwendolyne got busy Talkin' about tn Steel Strike an Free Trade in Porter Rico. till tn Trane Whissled fer Irn Springs.
 "Oh. them Cats!" cride Gwedolyne. Tn Young Man looked an they was all Ded. "I'l jist Tost 'em out now" sez he, an they fell in tn Corprit Limits of Irn Springs.
 About that time one of tn Outer Guards of Irn Springs come along an found tn Bodies of tn Cats. He re- ported 1t to Mir. Pemberton. the Mayor of Irn Springs. an tn Mayor Called a ar the Pavilyun. Sez he: This is a very Serious Matter. Wot shall we do?" Wun Voice sez: Les Berry tn Cats or throw 'ern into tn Gulsh." "I aint tn Mere Pack of tn Cats" sez MT. Pemberton; "they's Some Senti- ment in this which We must Publicly Resent Tn Flingin of Ded Cats at wun is generly Sine of Disapprovle. Ded Cats an Overdue Aigs Is tn An tithesus of Bokets, In this Case not merely a Indivdule but tn Hole Com- munity has been Insulted."
 Resolutions was adopted Censurin' tn People of Preskitt for tn Affrunt offered to tn Irn Springs Community. It was further Resolved that Preskitt People should hereafter be looked at with Suspishun an none of them should be Aloud to come to tn Dansts till their Cards had been Scrutinized Careful, fer. sez the Resolushuns, We won't have no Objectionable Charac- ters." Il
 LITTLE JAMES.