davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1901-09-08
GROOM CAUGHT THE RAzzLE.

GROOM CACCHT THE RAZZLE
Much his been said and written about
the trembling. EerI Gus, frightened. fear
II r-ri=l csr5lti0u - r-ost OF ht'lcs
during the ceremony and Just before The
contrast is always clearly drawn between
the robust self composed. collected and
undisturbed groom. and the aspen leaf.
leaf clinging vine tremul0usness OF the
fragile lfIy bride But one Instance is
remembered by several friends Of the two
who stnI reside in Wichita. Of where the
situation was reversed and the fearless.
frank and perfectly composed bride wait
ed long and suxi0uslv with her maids
down in the parior while the pastor and
her father told stories 10 Kill time Cp
stairs in his dressing room the groom
was being worked over by an anxious
group Of his more intimate friends who
were frauticaIy busy trying 10 bring him
around and get him landed on his feet
long enough 20 so through the trying or
deal. Three times did this langJid youth
faint dead away from sheer dread and
stage fright and Mysteries and those
things which tradition has solemly de-
cIared were perosatives solely Of the
other half The circus commenced Just
before the wedding march was due To
peal q time CT TWO. The contracting par
ties were 70 come into view from some
where or other and meet under an arch
Of asparagus stalks morning slories ard
other Vegetables. and rha together march
% the bay window where awaited the
gospel uaniQu, st1r who was 70 do the
deed But the deed failed TO ser done
rrlt uiehE Pale IS a snow bank the
v-ath heade5 himself down the winding
stairs % Keep his date Tor that bower.
but ON the second step sank il heap in
dead swoo-. His best man hurriedlv
summoned help ard ne was pulled t.
ee-her after several applications Of ice
water tn his ris-d face. He was sickIy
End fran at the best. but now his face
had CHASTITY eauut ard hollow bulge
Inward His eyes were dazzling with
that hectic Iustre Of animal fear. and his
salt was shazv with uncertain dread
Twice more he would make the attempt
and CUT would 90 his lamps agaira Fin
ally the assembled guests below suspected
something as The third TRIP 4 doctor
friend among the guests below had % be
summoned and be forbade the torture 70
20 any further that Night and the society
reporter for The Eagle. Disguised and
disappointed. came dragging back and
uereIy wrote, II place ~ his anticipated
h.S head story. the simple business ike
announcement. Postponed u1tI further
notice.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1901-09-08
CHINAMAN At TIE TELEPHONE

CHINAAA$ At THE TELEPHONE.
4 few days ago a Chinsman IN the city
who runs wsshee- washee shop en- the
avenue came into the long distance tele-
phone ONCE and asked 20 connect with
Enid He stood around nervousIy. like a
hen on a hot nail. awaiting his connection
with his almond eyes blinking Ike a cat 8
Finally the connection was made and
Enid answered already here and the
circus commenced. The Celestial Son ot
Heaven gathered together his wabbIv
clothes. gave a hike TO his shirt waist
and pnoteG into the booth labelled num-
Der one and trouble commenced forth
with. Efe left the door open 50 he could
have plenty Of sea room ard incidentally
more air. Then he wrapped his orange fea-
lures around the transmittsr and sang q
song OF Siwash that sounded ike a
Guinea hen trying 10 speak in CEoctav-
He iaborsd industri0usly with his native
tongue until his tongue got blistered ard
then every now and then he would relapse
into Anglo Saxon long enough 10 catch his
breath. The buzzing OF the induction mix
81 Up with the Celestial lingo until the
copper insulated wires grew hot and 81,
linked no Ike a gimlet and It looked Ike
the fuses would al burn cut before the
show was over. He would back Up against
the side Of the boot 20 get better pur-
chase on his vocabulary and then shoot
out another v0lley Of Oriental phraseolo-
~ until the woodwork began 20 grow
crisp and checked Just what ne was
saying 10 his Enid co-partner no one VIII
ever know. but il sounded more ike 2 wo
man suffrage convention when every sis
ter had the floor at oEcs and all tryins
desperately 10 get the speakers eye He
pecSed away with his antipodal CAB until
it seemed as though surely a flock or
hungry chickens were all busy picking up
sheled corn OF a pine plank. IL was not
hard work for him but very busy work
like milking sheep. he grew red On the
face and blurred away with sound liza
a saw mill working overtime on a hick-
CRY log At last he gave a rising infec-
ton 70 his voice which might have been
q cuss word or q tender farewell sighed
a time OF Two and hung up the receiver
with a look Of superb satisfaction. Then
IL grew stiu again Ike the calm after
trlrTlrIruorrS storm
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1901-09-08
WHERE IS YOUR ovERC0AT2


IN four weeks from row. If this item
doesn't remind EN- Of IL sooner. about
lisa Wichita men viii have the usual
annual falling out win their wives over
fall wearing apparel. The weather dur
ing the past four months has not been
such as 10 give men concern about their
spring overc0ats hats and other gar
ments. but an early frost in October VIII
stimulate interest il their wardrobe. Up
n the court house every closet has a light
overcoat belonging n some lawyer who
shed IL there the first warn day of the
season and it is dollars 70 eoughnuts that
when the first frost comes they VIII drive
their poor HctIe wives half mad trviug
- fnd them at home. They VII BE- look
ing for their felt hats a. home too instead
OF az Clarence FuIton-s OF sam Hess
There Is hardly q public place IN town
that hasn't an article o. clothing belong
ine 70 somebody who has forgotten L
there one bath house man toiE a reporter
for the Eagle Friday than be has 10 less
than twenty understands belonging q men
who changed thetr underwear sr the
oueniaz or Summer ard left the heavy
goods 20 r. called for in Q dav or tE0.
nv this time Il is safe. he thinks. % say
that eighteen OUT ~ she twenty have
forcottel that they eyer owned winter M
6erzear. TIE ssE5est victims ~ mans
forEetfuIuess are rs oy1rshoes- II Is
harder to ind thea thar last umbrella
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1901-09-08
wATER TRoUGHs FOR HOSES.

With su the couvea.suces IN Riverside
PARK it IS noticeable thar ncre IS there
s1r horses. Il has been suggested. ard
apparently vsth justification. thst some
vster trouehs ~ SCI 40 for horses. Hany
horses stay in TIE park an eatir- a-ter-
noon without water ard IRIS IS hardly
humane treatment IRE 0h5e-tia1 81
aater trcushs IS taat they v73 carss
r-ddl,s that wolls mar rhs beauty - the
PARK. but IRIS could - obvl4tea ~ plac-
~ them h so1e -eu7ts corners ~
any rare The question j. rec=-ei1E con-
s.5s-zbse atteutio1 firm people Wh7 BE-
ilsra thst the herses comfort shol.1 r.
looked AFTER a-rl-E re- weather.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1901-09-08
orFICIors EAsr SIDE noG.

There Is a uangrel skinny black dog
owned oar IN 1l1tthswson addition which
would never take prize Tor hizh hood
ed pedigree nor ger FAR beauty hgt has a
degree Of Loyalty sad fatthfulless which
IS better than human As soon IS ths
EsgIe arrives she assumes che duties 81
zuard ~ once and sqssts patiently BESIDE
il ana never leaves untI allowed 20 Even
q setting hen has al the protection she
wants and when enc az these elterr-ssing
t-zs feels the ove-whslu-luE desire eon-
~ her II las az ecE the dos seems
81 c1teh -he ex1l-ant thrll aiso and goes
s7.1.y O. the resi- along Wi1h the hen
ana Jess down end watts uncl the opera
-.r has beea successfully terminated ard
wEs her ran and struts around whiie
che hen does the cackle features 70 the
celebration She has assumed al these
virtaes t1r she had them not. neither ed
auy one ever train he- 90 BE- yhus s ge4--
dlan o[ papers wheels ana ben fEu5t.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1901-09-08
HE HAs A oTEER SIC

John D. Flintjer writes the queerest sig
nature On the Carey hotel register. He
IS a Kansas Eity drummer. There IS
only one way IL can be read and that is
by turning the book around and iuclining
one end Of it 70 an angle OF about 45 de-
grees II can be read plainly then.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1901-09-08

railway depot ard asked for Ed Val.
secretary OF the Little River Pearl Fish
cries. He IS talking now" was the re-
sponse- Yesterday when the doctor ar
rived home he went 20 another telephone
and asked for Nr. Vail again and his sur
prise can be imagined when Hello" said:
lie is talking yet The doctor says he
saw many curious things during his trip
but nothing 70 equal a man who could
talk one year and fifteen months without
stopping
The Merchants Telephone system was
equipped yesterday with a very hne deaf
and dumb attachment Of the latest design.
n the celebration Of the event connection
vas made with the asylum az OIathe.
where the inmates heard the very fine
concerts given BIZ Professor Sandford's
band. One Of the inmates telephOned 70
the Eagle last night saying they enjoyed
L very much.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1901-09-08
CAFE BACK DAsHBoARDLEss.

Last Sunday afternoon young popu-
lar man in society circles hired q livery
rig from one OF the fashionable stables
and started cut after q pretty girl who
yeus hello and number please" over
the telephone wires. The pair started
north for e nice sunny drive, and sonny
came nearly landing in the hospital with
his passenger and making Of the rig a
seublanee TO a threshing machine after
the cylinder had exploded. On Arkansas
avenue he started 10 show her how much
Of q horseman he wa-not He had tax
ea the pains 10 ask the stable foreman if
the horse was gentle and ne was told he
was all right, only 10 watch him when
turning corners as he was liable TO turn
short. On this trip he did not want 70
turn short. After he felt the cutting
stripes Of the whip he seemed only to
have one al absorbing ambition and that
was 10 90 straight ahead and at a gait
that seemed 70 indicate he was scheduled
for the North Pole and was behind time
in getting into clearance He took the
bits. and the youth too the lines, and the
girl took the youth and all OF them took
in what loose air was coming that way
from the north end Of the country The
girl was the smarter Of the two and sue
c, eded in getting the whip away from the
excited hoy so II would not pound the
back OF that fying streak OF horsefesh.
2 he lines were tightly wound around the
--rists Of the driver and he could not let
81 If he wanted 70. More dust was kick
cd VI for about mile than a regiment
Of colored troops could have done Fin
an the sand up about Sullivants dam got
too thick 20 make the zeal Of that mad
dened horse enjoy his squirt so he chang
cd his tactics and stood still. on his front
feet. and proceeded 10 make positively his
last appearance as a quadruped and be-
come q biped proper. He famed the air
with his hind heels until they had 70 lean
hack 7arc tC keep from having their faces
chopped up. The first belt he let 90 ne
took the dashboard off clean and pretty
and the knees and branches of the pair
Eot TaiE1oHy close TO those fan-tan heels.
II last ne wore himself ard the front Of
the buggy OFT and they took the wreck Of
tire dashboard in their laps and sadly and
rIefully picked out back streets 10 get
hack home Now when they go riding
t7ey leave the vhip at the stable and ask
IL the can't have a buggy with no dash
board. as they do not bring any back
with them anyway and It is no use start
ire with che
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1901-09-08

she Aston ISEzED TIE DOCTOR
Dr. NcA6zIs \. A HYDE and Judge
1.-the s-d E51- otLsr Wlchltz -e- wezt
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1901-09-08
SEVENTEEN SAMPLES OF SOIL.

Judge s " Tucker turned up Labor
Day after a sojourn OF three weeks II the
rev country Of Oklahoma. His straw
hat is a fright, but he is clinging 70 il
with that pride and fondness which make
veterans hang onto the Old coats they
wore in the trenches during a siege The
judge hung the straw hat on the end Of
his game arm and with his only hand
pointed out exactly seventeen different
kinds Of dust TO a reporter for the Eagle.
II had on IT every variety of soil in
southwestern Oklahoma from the black.
sandy loan Of Anadarho 70 the lime
stone dust Of the Wichita mountains.
When the Judge got OF the train he
looked like a man who rad made a trip
around the world as d stowaway. His
wife made him look like q gentleman
again-aH but that hat.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1901-09-08

down into Barber county IN March II. for
a buffalo hunt When they reached there
an intensely cold drizzle set il and they
concluded 70 return home \ new diff
Guilty rose up before them IN the form
OF a dense fog and for day and three
quarters they had 70 take turns about
marching before the teams with CON-
pas in their hands. Finally they arrived
az q dHg-out near Dry Greek and found
hospitality for the night A fine looking
young woman-one Of those hardy pioneer
daughters OF the plains who helped 10
make Kansas what il is-proceeded 70
get supper and succeeded in getting 9
good one. The gentlemen spread their
buffalo robes or the floor. while the wo-
man vas washing the dishes Dr.. Nc
Adams heard and noise and his practiced
ear realized that there was an infant IN
the house The woman went 70 cradle
and took 2 baby in her rms. The doctor
asked where its mother was and the wo-
man said. Il an the mother" The doc
tor was astonished. why" he said.
why, that baby doesn't seem 70 be two
days old" The woman said IL wasn't.
that It was born the day before. The
doctor never before or since knew g lady
with a baby one day old who could cook
z fine supper for seven hungry hunters.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1901-09-08
RT-INED RECATSE o EC0NONTY.

RUINED BECAUSE OF ECONOMY.
Money making" was the sOrdid theme
( OF discussion at the hot air club Sunday
night. The man who occupied the three
legged stool applied another match TO his
pipe and made this observation which is
something of paradox; If my wife
wasn't super-economical would be max
ing lots of money" Il was evident that
the poor fellow was way down 70 whore
the nicotine deposit was strongest, but
his friends had become interested and
permitted him 10 dream on. Yes, he
said, many man is ruined because his
wife is TOO saving. I earn less than 800
per month; I have the capacity, as you
all VIII admit. 10 earn $3.50 Why don't
do It: simply because 800 is more than
enough 10 keep my house under my
wife's management. If had married a
woman who could spend 81 in the fore
noon I would be making $. Political
economists are all dead wrong IN their
theory concerning the wages Of the world
If the wives Of the American wOrkingmen
were as economical as the wives Of work
ing men in Germany the Americans would
be earning only a dollar a day. Capital
will never pay labor more than what
VIII enable the workers 10 maintain their
own standard of living. II the laboring
man lives cheap his wages VIII be Low.
+ he lives high his wages viii be high
II il required So e month 70 keep the fam
H. Of a moteruan the street car com
panv would pay him So. Understand ne
now that mean motormen in general. 7
don't mean to say that one motermsn
would get So because Il required that
much for him to live II all the others
managed their affairs so they could live
on $40 Young man said be. turning 10
a bright peanut dealer, IF you can ind
some girl who can trot a hot pace with
your pocket book marry her and III
guarantee you that you VIII be earning
$3.50 or S175 per month inside Of five years
1 know men here in town who are making
$500 yearly who would be in the $500
class If they had married women who
could keep house on that amount while
I know men in the $50 a month class who
would be in the 800 a month list II they
had wives who couldn't get along on less
than see Necessity is as much the
the mother OF energy as she is the mother
of invention Fearing that their wives
would all take a ro1ion 20 buy s. shoes
and Sli hats the members Of the H 4
c. unanimously asked an Eagle reporter,
who was present. not to publish these Oh
servations. but they are too good % ig-
more Such rare philosophy should never
die within the four walls Of a hot air club.
The Lamar register., 1901-07-17
NOTICE OF APPLICATION TO SELL REA l.
ESTATE.

State of Colorado, In the County Court
County OF Prowcrs. = Of said County,
In the matter Of the Guardianship
of Samuel Franklin, Albert $. Notice
Franklin, Charles Franklin. Nh Of petition
10y Franklin and John u. Frank to sell
Franklin, deceased.
V,O ALL WHOM 1T MAY CONCERN, and to
1 Samuel Franklin, Albert y. Franklin, Charles
Franklin, Nilcy franklin and John u. franklin.
minor heirs Of benjamin franklin, deceased
You and each of you are hereby notified that
there will be filed in the County Court of Prov
ers County, State of Colorado, the petition of
Georgia Franklin. your guardian, asking the
court TO authorize and empower her to sell the
following described real estate, belonging you,
the said minor heir to-wit: An interest in an
undivided tivefourteenths interest in and to the
south half of southeast quarter of section nine
teen and north half Of northeast quarter OF sec
tion thirty, township twenty-one south Of range
forty-six west of 9th =. NJ, together with two
full paid water rights, derived from The Arkan-
canal. each water right representing one and ~
100 cubic feet of water per second of time, situa
ted lying and being in the County of Prowers.
State of Colorado. That said application
will be heard and considered on Thursday, the
Sst day Of August, AID. 1901, at 10oclock 4. NJ,
at the Court House in Lamar, Prowcrs County,
State of Colorado. You are further notified to ap-
pear at said time and place and show cause, II any
you have, why an order for the sale Of said prem
ises should not be granted as prayed for in said
GEORGIA FRANKLIN. Guardian,
j. X. ID bnghty, Attorney.
The Lamar register., 1901-07-17
church Services.

BAPTIST CHURCH-The usual services
on Sunday at the opera house. Sunday
school at 10 n. m. Preaching IL n. m.
and 8 p. IN. Bible class Mt I p. m. A
cordial welcome to all.
P. A. EUBANK, Pastor.
METHODIST CHURCH Services at the
regular hour Sunday, morning subject:
"The Way Of Entrance" Evening, "a
Sermon in Song" This will be unique
service. the sermon being interspersed
with song. Come and hear it. Hymns
%, 5O2, 533; and 3. 546. Y. p. S. c. T. at
Ia. IN. Topic. "a Strong, Weak Man.
Lender, Mr.. Hunnicutt.
j. r. kNuCKEY. Pastor.
CHURCH OF CHRIsT-Services at the
usual hour next Lords day morning.
Morning subject: ".Thelr Craft in Dan
ger" Y. p. S. G. f. meets at 7:30 p. M
Topic, "A Strong, Weak Man." Miss
Black, leader. Evangelistic services at
8 o'clock, subject: "Infant Baptism
This subject will be discussed in the
light OF history and scripture Prayer
meeting at the usual hour Thursday ev-
ening. Bring your testament. A cordial
invitation extended to all.
CLAY Il, RUNyoN, Pastor.
The Lamar register., 1901-07-17
Woodman Log-RoIIIne

The largest and most imposing gather
ing Of any secret society ever held in the
southern part OF Colorado will be the
Woodmen Log Rolling at Pueblo on
August 9Th ut the Mineral Palace.
There will be grand parade OF all the
camps including those as far north as
Colorado Springs. There will be q
special train in the morning and low
excursion rate. The Lamar camp exT :
band along with them. All citizens are
invited to go as well as Woodmen, and
the event will be well worth going to
see. Besides the great parade there
will be a fine program Of sports.
The Lamar register., 1901-07-17
Notice,

Notice is hereby given that the law
partnership heretofore existing by and
between c. q. Goodale and CRANKY Hill
yer under the firm name OF Goodale ~
Hillyer 10 hereby dissolved this date by
mutual consent.
Mr.. CRANKY Hillyer will continue the
practice OF law and to occupy the same
office heretofore occupied by the firm OF
Goodals Il Hillyer.
Witness our hands this 18th day OF
July A. d. 1901.
G. G. CooDALE.
GRANBY HILLyER.
The Lamar register., 1901-07-17
September is, 70 and 20.

The executive committee Of the fair
association held meeting last Wednes-
day night to fix the date for this years
fair. Paul Wilson, secretary OF the Pu-
eblo fair association, was present and
asked that the date be changed from
September %, "a and 25 as that was the
time fixed for the Pubelo fair. To avoid
a clash OF dates the committee fixed
September 1s, 10 and 20, as the date for
the Prowers County Fair.
The Lamar register., 1901-07-17
NOTICE FOR PUBLICATION.
U. S. LAND OFFICE LAMAR Colo. |
.IuIX lGtl. lMlI.

U. S. LAND OFFICE LAMAR Colo.
July 10th. 1901.
NOTICE is hereby given that tho following
IN named settler has filed notice of his in
tention to make final proof in support of his
claim, and that said proof will be made before
Register and Receiver at Lamar, Colorado, on
Thursday, August %. 1901, viz: Oliver Rhodes.
II. E. No. IT7O for the NWii Sec. 81 Twp. q s.,
Rg. ~ W. 9th p. NJ.
He names the following witnesses to prove
his continuous residence upon and cultivation
Of said land, viz A. Rhodes. Felix Cain J. q.
Martin and Howard Rhodes, all of Lamar, Colo.
il7-a2I WA. MERRILL, Register.
The Lamar register., 1901-07-17

For good goods and good prices, go TO
Buffers.
Nothing can be better than McLeans
Ice Cream.
A fine and complete line OF Furniture
at Buffers.
After July 1st Irwin will close out the
summer millinery.
Bottomley will be in Holly July 10, lG
and II. Granada July IS, 10 and 20.
Pure fruit juice syrups with ice
cream are served at McLean's fountain.
Go to the Marker Lumber Yard for
all kinds OF Building Material.
WANTED-A few bOarders by n resident
Of Lamar, Inquire at this office.
Try our Ice Cream. II it isn't first
class don't pay for it. Mclean Bros.
.Y Money to Loan. ~@1
A. f. CRAWFORD.
II you want a Shoe to give you salts
faction, try the Brown" at Buffers.
What is it? Children cry for, every
body buys and enjoys. McLean's Ice
Cream.
Step into Buffers and see those hand
some Side Boards, Dressers, Beds, Chairs
&c. A complete line. :.
All kinds OF Lumber at the right kind
of prices Mt Markers Lumber Yard,
southwest Of the depot.