davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22
He wouldn,t Pu.h Over.

The habit of holding down the end
seat in street cur has taken such q
6rm grip on some men that they pos
itively refuse to bulge whether the rest
of the seat is empty or not. One OF
these was sitting on the end of a vacant
seat in Fourteenth street car one
evening, when fat colored woman got
aboard. AS usual, this nanny" car
Eied big bundle that made her move
ments more awkward than ordinarily.
The only place in the car that would
at her was next to the man on the end
Of the seat, and she went for 1t. The
man did draw up O little, but otherwise
made no move to let the old lady in.
She had no alternative but to squeeze
IN sideways. AS she was making an I'm.
mense effort to get herself and the
bundle slowed away, the conductor
rang the 'go-ahead" bell. A jolt for
ward and terrific jolt backward were
al the little man felt, but when he did
realize what struck him the ''mammy.
had him pinned securely against the
seat. "'Tain't nah fault" replied the
old lady, to On angry exclamation from
the little man. EFF you kain't shov,
erlong when lady wants teh get inter
dis yere seat, yer's got ter tax de con.
s'quences." There was q suppressed
snicker among the other passengers
and the discounted little man left the
car at the next crossing.-Detroit Free
Pre5s,
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22
An unlcrirahle Ronraer.

Some time ago the keeper OF board
ing house retired from business after
having acquired comfortable COM
potency in the course of about 90 years.
During that period her house became
we'll known in the city aud among the
women in her own business. She new
er realized how well known 1t was un-
til she set out to find place to live in
herself.
She applied first at the house kept by
q woman nearly as we'll known as her
self only to learn that there was no
room for her. 1t was not until she had
been through the same experience sew
eral times that she came to understand
that she was not wanted in the estab-
lishments of her former rivals. Her
reputation for keeping fine house was
too much for the other women, who
did not want to submit to the scrutiny
of a former boarding house keeper who
had made q reputation and fortune in
the business.
She learned, after going to a hotel
where her record could not be used
against her, that she was not the only
woman who had found 1t difficult to
get into a boarding house after having
Kept one of her own. When they are.
we'll known. it is practically impossible
for such women to find quarters, for
whatever her reasons may be the land
lady does not like to shelter her kind
New York Sun.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22
HOUSEHOLD HINTS.
Cover sandwiches that are not to be
erycd at once with damp napkin and

Cover sandwiches that are not to be
served at once With damp napkin and
bowl.
To clean q Kitchen table rub the
greasy stains with lemon juice, and
they will speedily disappear.
Whiting mixed with alcohol is excel
lent for cleaning silver and will give u
much more brilliant polish than IL wa
ter is used.
A small fiat paint brush has value
in cleaning the corners of the window
sash. Hot, sharp vinegar will cleasl
off paint sEatters, and turpentine will
remove putty.
The small stiff vegetable brushes that
are SO convenient in cleaning potntoes,
etc, are useful III houscclcaning time
for scrubbing the holdings and corners
of the woodwork.
Loosely twisted knitting silk is better
for darning woolen underwear than
wool, which is apt to shrink II the
threads of the darn are left loose, after
washing it will have about the same
appearance Us the original texture.
If articles Of decidedly strong flavor
have been chopped in Q wooden bowl,
sometimes washing will not be suffl-
cient to entirely remove taste and odor.
In that case fill the bowl with warm
boraX water and let stand half an hour;
then rinse in cold water 9pd put in tho
SIM
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22
SIGNALLING TO MARS.
The Difficulty of Doing So by Means
of Light.


The very largest city that this earth
has ever known would be altogether
too small to be visible to n being
dwelling on the planet Mars, even If
that being We're ende;avoring to see 1t
with a telescope as powerful as the
greatest ard most perfect instrument
in any observatory OH this globe.
Ii the whole extent of Lake Superior
was covered with petroleum and il that
petroleum was set on fire, then, think,
we may admit that an inhabitant of
Mars who was furnished with Il tclc-
scope as good rs That which Percival
Lowell uses at Flagstaff might he able
to sec that something had happened.
Eut We must Eat suppose that the
mighty con!iaglmtion would appear to
tho a!artan ais Il Very conspicuous OBJ
jcct. 1t would. rather. Ike IL very small
feature, but still think it would not
be beyond the reach OF /; practiccd OBJ
server IN that planet.
On the other hand. IL an area the size
OF Lake Superior CA Mars WAS to be
flooded with petroleum and thct petro-
lcum was 10 be lSindled. we should OK
pect to witness the event from here not
as great and striking conlagration,
but as tiny little point of just dis.
ccrnible light. The disk of Mars is
not a large object, and the conlagra-
ticn would not extend over the three
hundredth part of that disk.
1t is sufficient to state these facts to
show that lhc possibility of signaling
to Mars is entirely beyond the power of
human rcsou.ces.-S Robert S. Ball
in independent
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22
BLuNDERs IN FICTION.
The Queer Mistakes Tint Are Some
times Made by Authors.

The Queer Mistakes Tint Are Some-
times Made by Authors.
We smile as we read and pass swiftly
by the stories Of inaidens that wander
In "loncly woods" at uncarthly hours
of night, always clad in ~ soft, white
elinging gown" Now. every girl knows
that tho average maiden is too much
afraid of tralnps and snakes to wander
in lonely woods" The weather, too,
appears to pcrplcN our novclists, for
not infrcluently they begin IL chap
ter at dawn, there are n few mo-
ments' conversation, and then the "sun
sets in lurid banks behind the distant
clnpurpled mountains
l ann reminded mt the outset of an
English story written by an author of
rcp,lte where the heroine III one scene
was made Oh one page to stoop down
and tie her shocstring. while three
pages farther on. directly following, it
was said of the same girl that she had
remained barefooted the entire day. In
another story Il blind woman is made
to view the hero through spcctacles be-
fore the tale is ended.
In French novel-nnd we generally
consider French such literary masters
"A heroine is clearly made to so direct
from Eer bed to the breakfast table,
out shopping, to an afternoon tea and
to dinner in her robe de mutt! Cousins
suddenly transformed into brothers
without Il moments warning are nu-
merous in this detectives library. Thus
one Is amused to find the most mar
veloGs mistakes in books which we
think we have carefully Modern
Culture.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22
PlTH AND POINT.

Very few people want to know the
truth unless it fits their prejudice.
Every one who doesn't like you is
looking for chance to laugh at you.
A great deal of nerve is sometimes
necessary to Keep from being cranky.
You know Il whole lot if you know
enough to know you don't know any,
thing.
When boy is not invited to a party,
he hangs around the outside to see how.
things are going.
When a drcssmakcr makes quilt
out of silk scraps, the women begin to
look at her with suspicion.
Every one is some kind of q sinner.
The employee too honest to take post
age stamp will steal his employers
time.
Be sensible with your children. When
you want them to do thing, tell them
why. Don't tell them they must do it
or take beating, or that they must do
1t because you say so.-Atchlson Globe.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22
The wido,v wo. comfort.s

There is no accounting for the con-
struction which some people will put
upon certain passages of Scripture" re-
marked clergyman. 81 remember the
story of one clergyman who went to
call on woman whose husband had
recently died. lie had expected, quite
naturally, to find her heartbroken with
the burden of her sorrow and was
greatly surprised when she greeted him
with very happy smile and ushcrcd
him into the parlor.
"'Well-er-sister,' he said at length,
you have my warmest sympathy
'Thanls you, doctor,' replied the Wild
ow casually. I did feel very badly
very badly indeed. But l came across
verse Of Scripture which comforted
me very much indeed
"'And what was the verse, sisterY
inquired the clergyman.
~ don't remember just where to
find It, replied the widow, but it was
made up Of only four words-four help
full words-'Why need 1 carey "-
Brooklyn Citizen.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22
svvcepinE lack the nlvc-.

Same time ago two hulking hobocs
who had just dismounted from Cen
trail freight train asked Il Yonkcrs man
for q loan of 10 cents to secure some
food. He took them to restaurant
and promised to provide them with
work as soon as they had finished eat
ing. When they reported for work, lie
said: 'Roys, my cellars full of WATER
and want you to pump it QUO. I've
fixed these hand pumps right here ON
the sidewalk. Never mind the people.
When they come along and ask ques-
tions, just you say nothing but pump
till the water's out of the cellar. Keep
cool. Don't hurry, but pump, and I
will pay you wcll.'
Now, Il tributary to the Nepperhan
river ran through this mans store cell
lar and out under the sidewalk, and the
pumps reached down into the river.
The water pumped out by the hobocs
ran into the sewer and lack into the
Nepperhan, but as the sidewalk was
tightly tagged the bumpers didn't
know the size of their job.
The Street became jammed with spec
tators, who roared With merriment as
they watched the hobocs. All but the
men at the pumps knew what was up.
When the sun went down, it descended
OH the wrath OF two Weary Willies,
armed With coupling pins. They hunt
cd all night for their kind employer,
but he was in New York telling his
friends.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22
Golf In the old Dnys.

Centuries back golf was pastime of
the royal family. though then usually
played in Scotland. The Stuart family
was very fonl of the game, and the
first English club was established ut
Blackheatli In 1908 by James |. His
eldest son. Henry, frequently played
and on enc occasion nearly struck by
accident his tutor with club, where
upon he coolly remarked, "uad done
SO lia, but paid my debts" Charles
was playing golf when he received
the news of the Irish rebellion. James,
duke of York. afterward james III, was
another ardent player. Golf is fire.
qEenlly mentioned in ancient Scottish
records and in the fifteenth century
was prohibited because 1t interfercd
with the practice of archery. Strut
considered it the most ancient game at
bali requiring Il bat.-London Chron-
inIO
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22
Oil to Lay the Dust.

Ames, Aug. 20.-Experiments
are being made near here by the
Chicago & Northwestern with q
view to using oil on the roadbed
as a means of preventing dust.
Five miles of track on the Iowa
division have been treated by the
crude oil process. In preparation
for the test the company used
1000 gallons of oil to the mile,
and the concern from which the
oil was purchased claims that it
will last for six months. At the
end Of that time it will be neces-
sary to sprinkle 500 gallons to the
mile once year. The cost of
the first years treatment is 800
q mile and after that the cost is
said to be about $50 a year. The
oil is sprinkled over the roadbed
by means of q specially prepared
flat car. Connected with the car
is another upon which is carried
q regular oil tank. From the
tank pipes carry the oil to sprink-
lers arranged under the first fiat
car.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22
Jay Gould,s First Trode-

Two boys who became distinguished
In widely different ways were Jay
Gould, the multimillionaire, and John
Burroughs. the naturalist. They attend
ed together the humble school In Rox-
bury, N. Y. John loved books, and
Jason was fond of making trades.
Young Gould had some books which
his school fellow wanted very much to
own. The more Burroughs thought
about the coveted books and more dill
gently he strove to save up his pennies.
Finally he had so cents boarded. TAX
Ing his wealth to Gould he found that
thrifty young gentleman quite willing
to do business. The books were traded
off for the money-mostly big copper
pennies-and both boys were made
happy. Mr.. Burroughs never regretted
his end of the bargain.-Success.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22
old Militia Election. and New.

From the American Revolution to the
year 1923 the officers of the militia Of
the state of New York had been ap-
pointed by the council of appointment
upon the recommendation of command
ing officers Of divisions, brigades and
regiments, and the promotions were
generally made according to rank and
seniority. Under the new constitution
and the militia law Of 1893, and in ac-
cordance with the democratic spirit Of
the period, the election Of military off,
GERS became the established usage and
has continued until the present day.
The election of officers in 1923 and fol-
lowing year was attended with consid-
cradle ceremony-otticers attending
them in full uniform. and noncommis-
stoned officers and privates in undress
uniform.-Clark's History.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22
The Squire, Hunter. wco,on.

The cream of squirrel hunting is en-
joycd by the man who uses Il light rifle
OF snail c;libcr and medium power.
The ".22 long" as now turned out by
our leading makers is an excellent
weapon-in fact. the best in the world
for the purpose. Though not of sut1i-
clcnt range to be dangerous to people
or stock at distance, 1t throws lead
with surprising accuracy to the tops Of
the tallest trees. Good rifle shots al
ways aim for the squirrels head both
to add to the difficulty of the sport and
to avoid spelling meat. And be it
known that II squirrels head at range
of 40 or 80 yards is no easy mark. If
n reader doubts this. let him so to the
woods for day. keep all empty shells,
and at the end Of the day let him try
to make the dead squirrels and the
empty shells tally.-E. w. Sandys in
Outing.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22
THE HoNEYBEE.
It's Curious Jaws end It's Wonderful
Little Tongue.


With the closest scrutiny 1t becomes
evident that the bee does not, like
other creatures, house its tongue in it's
mouth, but neatly folds it back beneath
it's head. Bulnblebccs, when disturb
ed, have way of thrcateniHg with
their jaws, while the honeybee has
the more direct method Of settling In
truders with hcr sting.
The jaws of the bee are very credit
able organs and can give quite a for
midablc nip. Catch a bee in net and
see how viciously it will bite ut tho
meshcs, working its jaws sideways in
stead of up and down.
We call this wonderful implement Of
the bee a tongue, but in reality it is
more than this, for the whole arrange
mont consists Of two slender filaments
chilled maSilln, the under lip and tho
actual tongue. Ii IL drop Of honey lies
near the surface of a flower, the slen-
Ger, active tongue, darting out from
the case formed by the maxillR, liclls
1t up with the same ease that dog
licks q plato. Should the tube of tho
flower be elongated the bee has ut
command another length of tongue,
which is shot out from within and
shuts up like telescope when no
longer wanted.
To appreciate fully this delicate
organ you should watch the bee sepa-
rate it into its component parts and
clean 1T out. The lengthening process
of the proboscls, as the tongue and It's
allied parts are sometimes called, is
accomplished by Il series of springs and
hinges. In addition to this telescoping
power the tongue is a hairy member,
the hairs arranged in rings, the longest
ones toward the center. They assist in
lifting in the nectar and in pumping it
into the mouth. Thence 1t goes to tho
honey Acknowledgment.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22
Crop Bulletin for Week End.
ing Aug. 10, 1901.

Des Moines, Iowa.-The past
week was warmer than usual, the
average daily excess in tempera-
ture ranging from 2 to 4 degrees.
The nights we're cool, however,
with considerable benefit from
dews. Except in q portion of the
northwest district the rainfall was
very light, and drouthy conditions
are still prevalent in four-fifths of
the state.
All immature crops need rain,
especially late corn, potatoes and
grass. The pastures are 80 scant
that stock are being fed, more or
less, in all sections of the state.
Material improvement in the gen.
eral condition and prospects of
the corn crop has been noted in
nearly all districts. Both early
and late corn are now more prom
ising in extensive areas than was
deemed possible on the first of the
month. But the future yield of
sound corn is contingent on favor
able weather conditions through
out the larger part of September.
Copious rains are needed very
soon for filling out the abundant
ears developed in late planted
corn gelds. With normal rainfall
the yield of late potatoes will be
much better than expected. A
fair start has been made in fall
blowing, but generally the soil is
too dry and hard.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22
Time to Go to Work.

"A woman was once trying to induce
General Sherman to use his influence
for her son in order that he might be
given place in the army, for which.
however, he had shown no particular
fitness. "His f3ther was in the army"
said the urgent mother, "and SO were
his grandfather and his great-grand-
father, and it seems as il he ought to
follow the line"
Him! Three generations in the
army" said the general. "Don't you
think. madam. that it is about time for
one member of the family to work for
q liyingY'
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22

TIE YOUNG GAMBLER.
He Had an Even Chance, but Fate
Was AGAINST Him.

remember one handsome young fell
low whom used to meet occasionally
on the staircase who captured my
youthful fancy. met him only at
midday, as he did not rise till late, and
this fact, With certain scrupulous elc-
gance and ncatness in his dress, ought
to have made me suspect that he was q
gambler. In my ineXperience 1t only
invested him with q certain romantic
mystery.
One morning as was going out to
my very early breakfast at u cheap
Italian cafe on Long wharf was sur
prised to find him also descending the
staircase. He was scrupulously dress
ed even at that early hour, but was
struck by the fact that he was all i'll
black, and his slight figure, buttoned
to the throat in tightly lifting frock
coat, gave, fancied, u singular melan-
choly to his pale southern face.
Nevertheless he greeted me with more
than his usual serene cordiality, and
remembered that he looked up with
a half puzzled, half amused expression
at the rosy morning sky as hc walked
a few steps with me down the deserted
street. could not help saying that l
was astonished to see him up SO early,
and he admitted that it was break in
his usual habits, but added, with a
smiling significance aftc<Fward re-
membered, that it was ''an even chance
If he did it again."
AS we neared the street corner man
in a buggy drove up impaticntly. In
spite of the drivers evident haste my
handsome acquaintance got in leisure
ly and, lifting his glossy hat to me
with q pleasant smile, was driven
away. have u very lasting recollcc-
tion Of his face and figure as the buggy
disappeared down the empty street.
never saw him again. 1t was not until
u week later that l knew that an hour
after he left me that morning he was
lying dead in little hollow behind tho
Mission Dolores, shot through the heart
III duel for which he had arisen so
early.-Bret Harte's "Undcr the Red
woods"
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22
Cave Dweller: In Dieppe.

People who only know the gayer side
of Dieppe would be surprised to hear
of the existence of the cave dwellers
there. One is apt to connect such peo-
pie with the knawed bones and flint
implements Of prehistoric times. But
here they are at Dieppe within stones
throw Of the casino. and they may be
seen any day about the town selling
the shellfish from the rocks outside
their hnbitations. They have certain
marked characteristics, one being pc
culiar complexion Of their own that
can be traced largely to a disinclina-
tion on the part of the cave dwcller to
avail himself Of the water that washes
SO close to his door. Their language
also is peculiar, but whether 1T really
belongs to the stone age no one seems
to have discovered. They have to hold
a license from the municipality, though,
which savors of no age but the present.
London Chronicle.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22
OPIUM IN TIE 'oRmxr.-
ssne Points About "H.ttins the Pine.
in the Chinese Empire and In
EOrmORa.

To learn the actual number of opium
smokers is impossible, but we know the
amount of the foreign import of this
drug and the nnivc confessions of re-
formed opium smokers tell us precisely
the amount of opium required to pass
the yin or craving. 1t is one-fifth of an
ounce daily. An ounce of lang is cons
sumed i'll five days. and catty suf1ices
for so days. -Four catties are enough
for 800 days, and another half catty will
carry the smoker to the end of year
with comfort. A picul is enough, then,
for only % persons, and $4,000 piculs IL
sufficient for not more than 100000
persons. The law Of compulsion in the
smoker is just us imperious for native
opium us for foreign. 1t is matter Of
great interest to know the extent of the
evil.
In regard to Szechucn, that very pop.
ulous and wealthy province, Mr..
schjoth, in the Trade Report for 1898.
Informs us that szechuen produces 1oo.-
600 piculs of opium, and the cultivation
Is always increasing. At Crungching;
where he is commissioner, he is told
that 10000 piculs suffice for consump-
ton in the province, and that 65,000
piculs are exported. We may conclude
that the smokers OF that province can.
not be less than 660,ooo. Since the popu.
lation is 67,00o,O00, the number of smok.
ers is one in hundred. In Shensi one
In one hundred and forty smoke; In
Szechuen one In hundred. In For.
mosa one in fifteen is the proportion in
cities where the people are sunk to the
lowest point of degradation, and this IL
the largest proportion yet known OF
opium smokers as compared with the
general population.--Shanghai (China)
Mercury.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1901-08-22
Chocolate.


In South America the retail price for
the better grades of chocolate averages
about 81 Il pound, while in Italy,
France, England and in the United
States the better grades sell at II much
lower price. In America the ordinary
chocolate of trade sells for about one
third of the price that is charged for it
where it is produced. The cause of
this. the, producers say, is that the
original lHPlct is adulterated greatly
before reasning its final market, a
cheaper article than the cocoa bean
constituting the large proportion of 80
per cent of the chocolates of commerce.
The cocoa bean from which chocolate
is manufactured is produced in it's fin
est form in Venezuela, though various
other parts of Central and South Amer
lea grow and export large quantities.
Two crops of the bean are gathered
each year, and the manufacture con-
sists simply in grinding up the beans
into meal and then adding sugar and
arrowroot, With the necessary flavor,
usually vanilla or cinnamon The mass
is nloistened until it is in a semitiuid
state, after which it is run into molds
OF the proper shape.