The Winslow mail., 1901-03-21
RAILROAD TATTLE.

The other day | observed an
engine carrying white flags in
front and green flags in the rear.
This was not only pleasant and
refreshing sight from an artistic
point OF view, but to those of
delicate nerves and vivid imagi-
nation like most brakemen pos
sess, it was reassuring. From
the color of the flags usually
displayed one might easily be
led to conclude that the road
was infested with pirates-and
not miss it far either. But if we
are going to sail under the black
flag, what's the matter with
completing our emblem of pira-
cy by painting a skull and cross
bones on it.
1t is a mistake to suppose that
all hind shack has to do is to
sit up in the cupalo and look
wise. Besides inspecting the
train for revenue mostly he has
to read and explain the orders to
! his conductor, clean and fill the
lamps, drag chains from the
store, protect his hind end
against the encrOachments of
the POI and similar predatory
marauders that are liable to dis
turb his slumbers, and perform
many other like duties, that are
a strain ON his inclination and
his intellect. And if perchance
be have an hour that he would
fain devote to the study of En-
erson or Browning he has TO
build cupboard tor the conduc-
tor to keep his grub in.
''Stinger" wants to know the
best way to discourage social
calls from other train crews
when you are trying to get a lit
tie sleep in your caboose or wish
to devote your leisure time TO
tae s,udy of the latest "stand-
ard" novel. ! wish he had given
me something easier, but will
do my best for him.
A plan which l adopted some
time ago was to keep a decoc
tiOu of asafHtida and limberger
in an air tight can. In cold
weather you can keep the can
under the stove. Then when
visitors announce themselves be
fore unlocking your door, uncork
your can. The aroma exhaled
will, in i very short time, dis
courage the most socially in
clined and hardened shack on
the road. Verify a rose by any
other name would smell sweeter.
This plan, / can guarantee will
always be found effective. AT
ter the call (Which will be brief
you can cork up your can and
open all the doors and windows,
allowing the perfume to dissi-
pate itself upon the circumam-
bient atmosphere, and then burn
ing rag on the stove will coun-
teract the oQor Of the visiting
shacks. | can recommend this
method as being justas effective
as q brake club and more hu-
maue. Beside y0u AVOID the
unpleasant necessity Of clearing
olt the debris liable to result
from an appeal to more brutal
methods.
A few evenings ago while in
Il. L. Noseross junk shop over
heard gentleman make some
adverse criticisms of my "Tat-
tie. " He said they were too
personal. there was no sense in
EN-, and besides they were liza
bic not only to give the snap
away, bat get the fool author
himself into troubleif 1.-THE Co. !"
ever discovered his identity.
Now as to the personal, [ can
say that both the striped con-
ductOr and his freak shack, to
whom [ particularly referred in
my last article were distinctly
fattered and told me SC. The
shack was even grateful for the
lift I gave him, as he is attempt
ing the almost impossible task
OF acquiring the reputation of
being, next to myself, the great
est prevaricator on the road. ]
knew he was working against