davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
IN BED FOR YEARS
DECLARED A HOPELESS INVALID BY
 LEARNED PHYSICIANS
by pr. Williams Pink Pills for Pale PeOpIe-A Most Wonderful Cure
From the Press, Grand Rapids, Mich.


 |. From the Press, Grand Rapids, Mich. Of the many remarkable cases which have recently occupied the attention of the medical world and of the public at large, none more strikingly illustrates the wonderful power of Dr. Williams Pink Pills for Pale People than the recovery of Mrs. Jennie Futile, who after two years confinement to her bed was restored to perfect health and strength. Mrs. Futile, who lives at the corner of Fulton and Market Streets, Grand Rapids. Mich, tells the follow lowing story:
 'I had been fiat on my back in bed for two years and the doctors had given me up as a hopeless case. They had reSOrted to every remedy known to their profession and had even sub jccted me to the tOrtures of five Surgi- cal operations. My trouble was due to change of life and I grew weaker and weaker until 1 became helpless and un- able to leave my bed. A nurse and four physicians attended me.
 "One box of Dr. Williams Pink Pills for Pale People gave me great relief eiuu dlIST uSIuS sIu6lu lOI IuTG0 HlOuIHS was a we'll woman, having been able to, leave my bed the sixth week after commencing the treatment. I can state that the cure was complete and perma- nent, as it is now three years since used them. 'I have recommended the pills to several of my relatives. My mother in-law, who is 72 years old, took them for general debility and they soon pro- duced a very marked improvement in her condition. I wish that the thou sands of women who are afflicted as l have been may know of this remedy, which has saved my life and given me health and strength" :" ss..,
 Signed, MRS. JENNIE FUTILE.
 Subscribed and sworn to before me this End day. of, August, 190D.
 B. F. BARENDSEN. r TSeal1 Notary Public.
 Dr. Williams Pink Pills for, Pale People are sold by all dealers, or will be sent postpaid on receipt of price, 50 cents box. or six boxes for ,$2.50, by addressing pr. Williams Medicine O., Schenectady, N. Y.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
Storms on the Ranch:

A former cowboy says: "When used to be a COW puncher, the, one thing dreaded was q thunderstorm, for light: ming usually, seeks out and strikes the highest thing in the place where it hits, and out on the plains the man on horse back is the tallest thing out When a storm comes up, you have constantly to ride hard, for the cattle get restless and need close watching to prevent them from stampeding, and I can tell you it tries a mans nerve when you can See the light hing strike all about you and know. that it is almost an even chance that it will ulti- mately seek xou, out, and slay you. ."'TSt. Louis Republic.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
Hoods Jdrsdpdrilid
Moral Enect of Pistol roting.

Will do you good. Begin to take it today.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
HOW,s THIS.

We offer One Hundred Dollars Reward fol any case of catarrh. that cannot be dured by Halls Catarrh Cure ...
 F: J. CHENEY x CO, Props, Toledo, o. We, the undersigned, have known F. J. Cheney fG the last Is years, and believe him perfectly honorable in all business transactions and financially able to carry out any obligation made by their firm. '
 WEST X TRUAx, Wholesaie Druggists, Toledo, O. WALDIEG, KINNAN & MARVIN, Wholesale Drug gists, ToiedO, O..
 Ha|l' Catarrh Cure is taken internally, act Ing aitectly upon the blood and mucous sur faces of the system Pri ce 75c. per bottle. Sold by all druggists. Testimonials free.
 Halls Family Pills are the best --.,..
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
ACker.,s
 English Remedy

will cure your cough and thus Fre= vent Pneumonia. It will heal sore lungs; and it will positively cure Consumption Always sold under a guarantee. -,
 Write to us for testimonials and free illustrated book on Consump- tion. -
 Sold 1t 25c, soc and e1.OO bottle. If you not satisfied return the bottle to your drnggfst, and get your money back.
 W.H.BOOker & Co.,, Proprs., Budalo, N. Y.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

at aaednstant disadvantage This is whfsyfoE the past twenty five. years, thonsanrfs of women have been con- fidiRg Eheir troubles tosss,. and our advias has. brought happiness and heattht ts eanntless,swomlehi in the ( $,
 Mrs fhaPpell, of Grant Park, Ill., whose portrait we publish. advises all suffering yomen to nse Lydia E: Pink hams sVegetable Compenud zs as if cured Her of infanmatien Of the evaries and wo&nb :sshes therefore, speaks from
 knowledge, and-her experience ought to give otherscenfidence. Address Mrs, Pinkham's Laboratory; Lynn, Mass. :,
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
AFTER-EFFECTS
 OF LA GRIPPE.

FIFE grip 10 ailments which follow the ssrisas acute stage Q lightly. They eonfnsa dssgres1hs
 
  fn results with who a Of Peruna.. Read what following Wabinoton Fab 4 1890 Uasbinoon Arr;I
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
There fire 24OO

Disorders incident tothe human frame, of which majority are caused or pro- noted by impure blood.
 The remedy is simple.
 Take Hoods Sarsaparilla.
 That this medicine radically. and effectively purifies the blood is known to every druggist, known to hundreds of thousands of people who themselves or by their friends have experienced its curative powers.
 The worst. cases of scrofula, the most agonizing sufferings from salt rheum and other virulent blood dis eases, are conquered by it, while those cured of boils, pimples, dys- peptic and bilious symptoms and that tired feeling are numbered by millions. Hoods Jarsapdrilld VIII do uo,, oood Reoin .to take it tOdav
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
Severe Penalty.

Prince ChEgi, a Roman noble, sold 8 Madonna by BOtticelli to an English dealer last. winter for $6O,OOO. To sch art treasures out of Italy without the permission of the Government is con- trary to law. The Prince was accord ingly prosecuted and ordered to pay to the. Government the price he received for the picture.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
1441 South Ninth Street,
>EPbiIadeIphia: Pa May 6 1S99

D. D.Wallace a char ter member of the h. ternatiOnal Barber S Union writes from 15 Western avenue, Min neapOlis Minn.
 Following a severe attack of Ia grippe I seemed to be affected
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
Why a WOz'1aEs fs Able to Help Sick Women
 When Doctors Fail.

How gladly would men fly to wo- mans aid did they but understand a woman's feelings, trials, sensibiities, and peculiar organic disturbances.
 Those things are known only to women, and the aid a man would give is not at his command
 To treat case properly it is neces- sary to know. all about 1t, and full information, many times, cannot be given by woman to her family phy- sician. She cannot bring herself to tell everything, and the physician is
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

---s-s- --->-s s--,---
 -- 7--+
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
GRIP
 CAUSED NERVOUS DYSPEPSIA

badly all over. I suffered with a se- we're tackache, indigestion and -numer- ous ills, so 1 could neither eat nor sleep, and thought I would give up my work, which 1 could not afford to do. "One of my customers who was greatly helped by Peruna advisedl me to try it, and 1 procured bottle the same day. I used it faithfully and felt marked improvement. During the next two months took five bottles, and then felt splendid. Now my head is clear, my nerves are steady, l enjoy food, and rest we'll. Pernna has been worth dollar dose to me- "- D. l.. Wallace
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
rhe ouestion with Him.

''The question" replied Prince Yuan, 'fs whether or not there shall be any partition of China"
 Tt occurs to me-" said Prince Chung, "that the main question is whether or not there shall be any partition of you and I."-Baltimore American.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

i Gentlemen-;"I , have taken Peru . na now for two ] weeks, and find l , am very much re- . lieved. 1 feel that ] my cure will be ,p e r m a n ent. I . have also taken it
 ] for la grippe, and
 It Ike pleasure in
 recomm e n q in 2 ! Peruna as an ex- = - -
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
Proof.

A low cry of anguish fell from her lips. aze ...z ..,-s -zsy
 My heart is broken~ she moaned.
 Guardedly we expressed a doubt of this. sc~~i
 "Yes, yesw persisted the girl, wildly wringing her hands. 'For why, else, have I today written fewer than ten pages in my diaryT' e~ Y. g,
 Now although we had comparatively small understanding of the subtler motives of the everlasting feminine, we felt inSJinotiI ely that: here was 5prsef not lightly to- be gainsaids--De- stroit Journal.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

Washington Star:1 Do you think bachelors ought. to be taxed?" asked Willie Washington.
 "No," answered Miss Cayenne. "I think the girls ought to make up purses and pay them bounties for not making homes unhappy"
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

GChicago :Tribune:l "You won't touch that cake!" his wife tearfully exclaimed. And I made it on purpose to please yoI You have no heart!"
 Perhaps not, Maria replied the dyspeptic husband. with siigh. But am painfully conscious of my liver. ''
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
Shifted Him

Railway Official (traveifng lncog. on his own Iine)-They say there has been some fault found with the lamps on these trains. Do you see anything wrong with them? ... .1::.. 7.
 Eassenger-No, sir. On the con- trary, they are exactly the kind of lamps I like to see used.
 Railway Official (highly pleaseO- prGsun1e. you are a prof man?
 PassengerSYes,r sir. I..amEan oci: list.-London Fun.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

[Chicago Times-Herald:] T nexer tell all I know" he said, intending to be mysterious.
 Well" she replied, ''it certainly can't be because you don't have time.' v
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

2 Gentle men ! A bout tW O i, months ago l was . taken very lll lwith Ia grippe
 1, and was obliged
 . to go to bed 2 ] took three bottles
 l of Peruna with
 livery beneficial ] results and was i able to leave my he'd in a WpSk
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

Topeka is going dry. remarked Me Swilligen.
 But Mrs. Nation is not drying up, ' added Squildfg. :,<
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

Miss Alice DresSler- of 1913 \. Bryant ave nue, Minn e eaPOlis. Minn. ., writes as fol- lows concerning Peru na: Hast spring l suffered from Ia grippe and was partially cured, but the bad
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

Philadelphia Record:] Hoax-I saw you at the theater last night. You were in the dog seat . Joax-Sir, what do you mean?
 .Hoax-Weren't you sitting in K-9?
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

In the spring, take Garfield Tea. This wonderful Herb Medicine purifies the blood and gives new and vigorous life to systems depleted by the trying winter season.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

Now that the winter season is past, it is well to cleanse the system and purify the blood with Garfield Tea an Herb Medicine that brings good health.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
1chaznge.

Do you: thfnE people In the next world VIII foli91y..t1es same ,oecupa- tions they do here2' asked the. sossIp- !ng lady,. -.
 "No," said the. chilrchman; .:9eyery- body will attend to isroYn@business bere."-Syracuse- Standard.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

SWheat Consumption of the World. s ;fhe bread-eaters of the world require
 more. than 2,SOO,QOO.OOO bushels of sswheat every twelve months.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
Candid

"Did you do nothing to resuscitate the body 2". was recently asked of 8 witness at a coroner's inquest.
 '"Yes,. sir, We searched the pockets" was the reply.-Sacred Heart Review.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

I do not believe Piso's Cure for Con sumption has an equal for coughs and colds.-JOHN F. BOYER, Trinity Springs, Ind, Feb. 15. 1900.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

,sAn irreverent writer says a that satan's fall was probably due to his having slipped on n peal of thunder.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
How to Keep in the Swim.

"Mrs. Fotheringay Jibbs came to my reception without an invitation"
 You don't mean ft?"
 "Yes; she explained to me that she felt sure my omission of her was an oversight. ."-Indianapolis Journal.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
Plain Evidence.

Wife-What shall We name the baby, John? Husband-I have decided to leave that entirely to you, my dear.
 John, you've been drinking again?'- Smart Set
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
Not a SufraSist

Madam, are you a woman suffra- gist? ,,<e ,f AN, ..r.a iis&, sS =, S-.No, sir; haven't time to be-" s sS=s'Haven't time2 We'll; if you had the priylsge-ef voting whom would you support?"
 "The same man have supported for the last ten years-my husband. Modes and Fabrics.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

Hush, Don't You Hear the Baby Cry?
 The only safe medicine for sour curd collie in nursing babies is Cascarets Candy Cathartic. Make mothers milk mildly purgatlve. Drug. gist-, l0c 25c, soc.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
oyerdid It a Little.

Oyerdid It Little. Rev. Mir. Saintly-I< was very sorry that I couldn't fill my pulpit last Sun- day, but I hope you liked my substi- tute.
 Mrs. Witherby-Oh, yes. He was fine, and told my husband, who didn't go; that he little knew what he had missed.-Life. ,.,.&
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
Thought He Ate the Tires.

Thought He Ate the Tires.
 Star Boarder:--Well, even if this is an age of Improvements, they have not yet found substitute, for the Thanksgiv. ing turkey.
 Mir. Sourdropp-I don't know. think they gave us some stewed automobile last year.-Baltimore American.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
Grip Poisoned Her Blood

Mrs. T. w. Collins, Treasurer of the Independent order of Good Templars Of Everett, Wash. writes:
 ''After having a severe attack of Ia grippe 1 continued in a feeble condition even after the doctor called me cured My blood seemed poisoned
 II also suffered with dyspepsia, and had either to starve or suffer from what 1 was eating. A neighbOr who was uss- ing Peruna praised it so highly that she induce me to try 1t, and l soon found this was what l really needed
 ''I could soon eat my rssular meals with relish my system was built up,my health returned and have remained in excellent strength and vigOr now for over two years Mrs. T. ". Collins
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

A young man seldom believes that girl enjoys kiss unless he has it from her own lips. .-.. ~e.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
GRIP LEFT HER BROKEN DOWN

after-effects remained through the sum- mer and somehow did not get as streng as I was before "In the fall caught cold after getting my feet wet and att tended a lecture in cold hall and suf-- fered a relapse. Catarrh Of-the throat and head followed, and as l was in a weak condition physically previous tO this, it took but little to break me down completely. One of my college friends, who was visiting me, asked me to try Peruna and did So and found it all and more than I had expected It not only cured me of the catarrh, but restored me to perfect health. '-Alies Dressler.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

TO CURE A COLD IN ONE DAY
 Take Laxative Promo Quinine Tablets. All druggists refund the money If it fails to cure. .. w. Groves signature IS on each box. 25c.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
WorseA Yet.

Mrs. Wunder-What are these straw7 berries worth?.
 Marketman-One dollar, lady. Mrs. .-Wunder-What? A dollar a box?
 Marketman-No, num- A dollar apiece.-Baltimore American.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
prunkenness I'm Scotland.

In the matter of sheer, besotted, over ? mastering drunkenness we stand with ou: plvals In shameful isolation.-Dun. dee Advertiser.
 rSssSeS.s ' A--.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

all fellow sufferers. M. w. Howard
 Congressman Towards home address is Fort Payne, Ala.
 Grip Produces Catarrh
 Henry Distin, the inventor and maker of all the band instruments for the Henry Distin Mfg. Co.,, at Williams port, Pa, writes:
 144l South Ninth Street,
 Philadelphia. Pa, May 6, 1899.
 Dr. s. B. Hartman, Dear Sir: :-"I write to inform you that I had a bad attack of la grippe last December which lasted more than three months and which left me with catarrh when sever al of my friends advised me to try your wonderful medicine, Peruna. began with a bottle the first week in March and it certainly. did me great deal of good. was so we'll satisfied that pur- chased another bottle and followed your directions, which you furnish with every bottle and I am glad to say that it has cured me. I shall certainly rec ommend the Peruna to all my friends. '
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
And Do 1t First.

Askit-What is your understanding of the Golden Rule? Does 1t mean: Do unto others as you would like to be done hY?"
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

EHEA Permanently Cured. No fits or nervousness HtO after first day's te of Dr. klne's Great Nerve Restorer Sendfor FREE S2. % trial bottle and treat ise DR. R. H KLINE, Etd, 95l ArchSt fnIaoelpha' fa
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
Lovely PhiIanthropy,

Mrs. Brown-We are going to give a progressive .euehre for the poor. I love to do; ;kamething for the poor. :;
 Mrss 5nesESo dol. love to play progressing euehre for them,-B Brooklyn,
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

do of al valuable
 pr Hartman of
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

Biznese-No; my interpretation is: Do unto others as you would be like ly' to be done Philadelphia. Press.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
aT YOU ARE1,AKNTc

YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE TAKING When youA take sGroye,1 Tasteless Chill Tonic because the formula is plainly printed on every bottle showing that Is Is simply Iron and Qui- nine in tasteless form. No. Cure. No pay. sec
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
Running Expenses.
Smith-How so?

Jones-Ihey say the running expenses of Slobb, JObb & Co. eat up all the profits.
 Smith-How so?
 Jones-Slobb was running for Con gress and JObb was playing the races. Puck.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
Al Very Good Reasou.

Sunday School Teacher-Herbert, can .you tell me how Christmas came to be celebrated? -
 Little Herbert promptly)-Yes'm. Santa Claus was born on that day!- Philadelphia North American.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

The Best Prescription for Malaria.
 Chills and fever is bottle of GrOye's taste less Chil Tonic. 1t is simply iron and quInfne in a tasteless form. No cure-no pay, Plice DOC
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
Stops the Cough

Laxative Bromo-Quinine Tablets. cure cold inone day. No cure. No pay. Price 25 cents.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
On His Mind.

IedCHtI-W HO CttH HdIH@ IHe- DOHeS UT the skullP
 BObby-Pve got lem all in my head, but I can't think of them.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
A Sure Indication.

.-IHere," said the agent of the steam ship line. 'sare a few of qour cfEeulars and booklets; giving detailed descrfp lions of winter tours to out-of-the- way
 places on our vessels"
 The bank s@1eashier paled and shranK back with .gesture-of alarm. =
 sss.Take1 lem away!' he gasped. EIi one of the Directors 'ud see those things sticking out of my pocket, he'd put a bunch Of experts on my books! Take 'em awayg'-Washington Post:
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
A Surnrisa.

What's the matter with Jones? He looks; troubled"
 "Well, you know he was. desperately in love with Miss Gaygirf, and one night, he; though4essly asked ner ito marry him, and" / ''She Tefdsed hiInff'' ., ''No, she accented him,"-Colorado Springs Gazette, #
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
The Professor's Dilemma.

:. ..,-BoOker-PrOf. DelvingsOn Is ma ter rible :quandary. :.
 Hooker-WEy, what's thR tronble2
 Bo0ker-He has discovered new dis ease and can't find any germ for it, Chicago News.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

- Washington, Feb. 4, 1899.
 The PerunaMedicine Go. Columbus. o. :
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

u--na--~--@..- and regainsd my usual strength very soon. have nos ing but the highest praise for Peruna and recommend it to those. similarly afflicted wherever I can. flames M. Anderson.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
Inflammation of the Lungs it used to. be called. It Is now
 called Pneumonia.

If you have cough you are in danger. If you survive Pneumonia your lungs are weakened. and Con- sumption easily fastens itself upon
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

Washington, April q, lSOO- The Peruna Medicine Co, Columbus. O
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20
MO External
 Symptoms.

The blood may be in bad condition. yet with nos external. signs no skir eruption or sores to indicate it. The symptoms in such cases being variable appetite, poor digestion, an indescribable weakness and nervousness, loss of flesh and general ;run-down condition of the system clearly showing the blood has lost its nutritive qualities, has become thin and watery. It is in just such cases thai S,S. S. has done some of its-quickest and most effective work by building up th blood and supplying the elements lacking to make it strong and vigorous.
The St. Johns herald., 1901-04-20

Wise men. of ancient times were probably no wiser than other men, but they talked less.
The Butte inter mountain. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1901-1912, 1901-10-19

away from the phone and say Hello
rather loudly" His request was COM
piled with.
Nov step four feet to the right and
do the same" No sooner said than done.
Nov step four feet to the left and re-
peat" The obliging coroner did so.
Now get directly in front of the in
strument, about four feet away, stand
on your head and say Hello"
Then the coroner ragged. He tumbled
to the fact that Jimmy was up to his old
tricks and began to talk. but Jimmy
hung up his receiver and asked central
to connect him with Phil Mcdonnell.
The same performance was repeated
with him. When the request came for
Phil to stand on his head and say
Hello" he thought the tester was ask
ing little too much. and said he couldn't
do it, but that he would do the next best
thing, so he got on his hands and knees
with his head near the floor and spouted
Hello"
"All right Mr.. Mcdonnell, your in
strument is in excellent shape" came
blandly over the phone. Then Jimmy
went to work.
The Butte inter mountain. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1901-1912, 1901-10-19
Eourteen Miles of Snakes.

philadelphia Special: Captain Roberts
nc tho steamer Osingwold which arrived
here yesterday with a cargo OF sugar
from Soerabaya, Java, has on ms snip
log an interesting entry from Aug b. On
that date while in latitude 5o22 south'
and longitude 1922 east. he saw TO the
southwest an expanse OF sea that hau
bright red, appearance. The phenonena
interested him and he directed his vessei
toward it and as he came near ne
noticed that it appeared to be dotteu
with black specks. When he reached II
he saw the strangest sight that greeted
his ewes in a sea-faring life OF rorty-
three years. =
/ AS far as the eye could see in every
direction the sea was blood red ana
filed with millions of wriggling snakes
These reptiles had black backs, and
about two inches from the tail began a
white line that was about three inches
broad. Some of the snakes were dead
and the upturned bellies of these were
white. The reptiles squirmed, but made
no progress in the moss and many OF
them were cut to pieces by the Prov of
the ship and the screw. They appear
ed to make no effort to escape.
Their average size was three feet, but
some of them were six feet and more
long. The vessel went through the en-
tire extent of the moss, consuming in
the passage nearly two hours, it being
fourteen miles long by four miles wide.
The black particles which the captain
had noticed were seeds somewhat re-
sembling those of the watermelon but
larger. The substance appeared to be
about two feet thick. Several bottles
a
the seeds, and these will be sent to the
United States photographic office.
The substance was about the color
of tomato soup, the consistency of jelly
! and had an odor of fish. The phenom-
ena We're first noticed when the vessel
was about forty-three miles southwest
of CeYlon.