Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1901-04-09
HIS EXCUSE FOR IoAFIrG.
The Reporter Thought the Deaf flutes
Would Talk II lie cot Them DRINK.


Would Talk II Re cot Them DRINK.
"When a reporter knows TIE roIes
and wants to loaf, or 'soid.c.,' as the
phrase goes said an old rewepaper
man oracularly, the othernigl It, With
in the hearing of New Orleans
imes-Democrat reporter, she gen
orally exhibits amazing ingenuity in
the way Of thinking up excuses for
his lassitude. I've heard good many
picturesque pleas along that line in
my time. but | believe the palm be-
longs to my old friend Billy Brewster.
/ made Billy's Acquaintance on the
staff of the - Clarion, continued
the veteran, getting fresh light for
his pipe. "The Clarion was in pretty
hard lines in those days II the prin
cipal reason why it hel local staff
together was because lane Of the
boys had enough muncy to get out
of town. AS a natural consequence
they did about as they pleased, know
ing full well that McAdams, the city
editor, didn't dare to fire them, be-
cause he couldn't get anybody else to
take their places. One night there
was big rush Of news that took out
the whole staff, and while the Office
was empty as a drum McAdams dis
covered, by mere accident, that the
man he had sent to cover an impor-
tant convention Of deaf mutes was
then asleep in a neighboring saloon.
For few minutes he swore impo-
tently; then he rushed over to the
phone and called up police headquar-
tiers where Billy was on regular as
signment. Brewster he said, i wish
you'd run over to Thalia hall and get
something about that deaf mute con-
vention. The fellow | put on the
story has fallen down. Billy didn't
much like the idea of being taken
from his regular detail, but he
growled back All right and started
out. That was the last heard of him
until three o'clock in the morning. |
Meanwhile McAdams was rushing
around tearing his hair, and really |
thought he was going to have a sure
enough fit, when the door opened and
in walked the missing man. His |
eyes were fishy, his cravat was screwed
around under one ear, his clothes
were muddy and disheveled, and /
saw at glance that he was full up to
the neck. Good Lordl Brewster,
roared MtAdams, what in thunder |
have you been doing all this time?
Where is that deaf mute report &
didn't get It, replied Billy, with
drunken solemnity. Didn't get itp
yelled poor Mac, simply beside him
self; Suffering grasshoppersl and here
we are, just going to pressp Then he
got pathetic. Il didn't think you'd
throw me down this way, Brewsterp
ne groaned; it's too bad, indeed it is,
when we're all trying so hard to pull |
the paper through That was too
much for Billy. lie melted into
naudhn tears. Don't reproach mep
ne blubbered; 4 can't stan i'll Here
I've gone an sacrifsh' myself for tn
IL paper, an get nothin but roast
m! boo! hool hoor Sacrificed your
selfp exclaimed McAdams, I'D like
to know howl I'll tell y, said Billy, |
still weeping copiously. 4 went down |
to tn hall, jus you tol me, an the
blame thing was shut up. Then ! met |
some tn deaf mutsh on the street !
IN tries to pump 'em, but l couldn'.
So ] starts in to get 'em drunk 30
get 'em drunkp beloved McAdams,
beyond all endurance;
what in the world did you want to get
hem drunk for?' & thought maybe
[ could make 'em talk replied Billy,
shedding more tears"