davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02
"A FEW
INTERESTING
FACTS

When people are contemplating a
trip. whether on business or pleasure.
they naturally want the best service
obtainable as far as speed. comfort and
safety is concerned. Employees Of the
WISCONSIN CENTRAL LINES are
paid to serve the public and our trains
are operated so as to make close con-
nections with diverglng lines at all
junction points.
Pullman Palace Sleeping and Chair
Cars on through trains.
Diring car service unexcelled. Meals
served a la carte.
In order to obtain the first class SER
vice, ask the ticket agent 10 sell YOU
ticket over. ...
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Thomas Maple, Rirkheck. IN. writes;
II had a very bad case or kidney trouble
and my back painel mo So that could
nor stralghten up. The doctors treat.
ment dill me Ao good, Saw Foley's
Kidney Cure advertised aud took one
bottle which cured me and | have not
been affe ted since. | gladly recon-
mend this remedy" Hart's drug store
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

II have been troubled with indigestion
for ten years, have tried many things
and spent much money to no purpose
until I tried Kodol Dyspepsia Cure. I
have taken two bottles and gotten more
relief from them than all other medi-
cines taken. feel more like boy than
l have felt in twenty years" Anderson
Riggs. Of Sunny Lane. Tex. Thousands
have testified as did Mr.. Riggs. CHAS.
ROGERS, Druggist.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02
BEAUTIFYING THE CITY.

Baker City Republican.
A careful comparison of the residence
portion of the city with the condition
that existed two years ago will reveal
a marked improvement. Especially this
spring are the people giving attention
to the beautifying Of the yards. plant
ing shrubbery, building new fences or
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Last winter J was confined 20 my
bed with a very bad cold on the lungs,
Nothing gave me relief, Finally my
wife bought bottle OF One Minute
Cough Cure that effected a speedy cure.
I cannot speak too highly OF that ex-
cellent remedy. Mr.. T. X. Houseman,
Manatawney. Pa. CHAS. ROGERS,
Druggist.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02
NOTICE OF FINAL SETTLEMENT.

The undersigned has filed hi, nnal nc.
count In the estate ~ Margaret Wcsct.
deceased, and the County Court NJ Clat.
SOP County. Oregon. has set Monday.
the 9Th day Of May. 1891, at . p. m
for hearing objections II any here be
90 the same. DAVID WEST
Executor OF las; will and testament OF
Margaret West. deceased.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

/ hal running sore on my breast
for over a year" SAYS Henry II. Rich
ards Of Willseyville. y. Y. and tried u
great many remedies, but got no re-
lief until I used Banner Salve. After
using one-half box was perfectly
cured. | cannot recommend it too high
ly." Hart's drug store.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02
FOOD CHANGED TO POISON

Putrefying food in the intestines pro-
duces effects like those Of arsenic. but
Or. Kings New Life Pills expel the
p0isons from clogged bowels gently,
easily but surely, curing constipation,
biliousness. sick headache. fevers. all
liver. kidney and bowel troubles. Only
2jc al Hart's drug store
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

II had piles SO bad could get no
rest nor find cure until tried De
Wits Witch Hazel Salve. After using
Il once I forgot ever had anything
like piles."-E. c, Boice. Somers Point,
y. Y. Look out for limitations. BE
sure you ask for De Wits. CHAS.
ROGERS. Druggist
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Mr. F.. II, Arnold. Arnold. Iowa,
writes; He was troubled with kidney
disease about three years Had to get
up several times during the night but
three bottles ot Fuley's Kidney Cure
effected complete cure. he feels better
than he ever did and recommends Il
to his friends. Hart's drug store.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

You will waste time II you try to cure
indigestion or dyspepsia by starving
yourself. That only makes II worse
when you do eat heartily. You always
need plenty OF good food properly di-
gested. Kodol Dyspepsia Cure is the
result OF years Of scientific research
for something that would digest not
only some elements OF food but every
kind. And II is the one remedy that
will do IL. CHAS. ROGERS, Druggist
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02
DON'T LET THEM SUFFER

Often children are tortured with itch
ing and burning eczema and other skin
diseases. but Bucklens Arnica Salve
heals the raw sores expels inhamma-
ti0n. leaves the skin without a scar.
Clean. fragrant, cheap there's no salve
on earth as good. Try it, Cure guar
anteed. Only 25c at Harts drug store.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02
THE GREAT scoURGE

VI modern times Is consumption Many
cures aud discoveries from time to time
are published but Folcy's Honey and
Tar does truthmlly claim To cure all
cases IN the early stages and always
affords comfort and relief IN the very
worst cases, Take no substitutes,
Harts drug store,
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02
EXEcurnRs. NOTICE.

Tho undersigned have been appolnted
executors of the last viii and testament
~ ChaH A, Mcclure. deceased All per.
sons having claims against tho estate
NJ deceased are requested 10 present
them at IN ONCE Of J. O A. ilowlby
IN Astoria. Orgon. within six months
from this date OLIVE INQUIRE.
] . 4. HOWLBY.
Executors
March 2Sth 1901
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

The greatest skin specialist in Amer
lea originated the formula for Banner
Salve. For all skin diseases. all cuts
or sores, and for piles. It's the most
healing medicine Beware Of substi-
tutes. Harrs drug store.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Rebate tickets on sale between Port
Iand' Sacramento and San Franclsco.
Net rates $l7 first class and Sil second
class. including sleeper.
Rates and tickets to Eastern points
and Europe. Also Japan. China. Homo
lulu and Australia. Can be obtained
from j. B. Kirkland. Ticket Agent Is1
Third Street.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02
THOUSANDS SENT INTO EXILE.

Every year a large number of poor
sufferers whose lungs are sore and
racked with coughs are urged to go to
another climate. But this is costly and
not always sure. Don't be an exile
when DR.. Kings new discovery for con-
sumption will cure you at home. It's
the most infallible medicine for coughs
coils and all throat and lung diseases
on earth. The first dose brings relief.
Astounding cures result from persistent
USE Trial bottles free al Hart's drug
store. Price SOC and 81. Every bottle
guaranteed
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

All communications intended tor pub
ilcation should be directed to Editor
Astorian." business communications
OF all kinds and remittances must he
addressed TO THE Astorian Publish
ing Co"
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02
WHITE COLLAR LINE
Columbia River and Puget Sound Nav
igation Company,
ITclephone Dock.

Tho Bailey GatEert leaves Astoria
daily except Sunday at p. m,
Leaves Portland daily except Sum
day at Z a, m,
White Collar Line tickets, o. X, n N.
tickets and llwaco Ry 4 Nav. Com
nHnv tickets interchangeable on Bailey
Ga,xcrt and HaSsllo, Through Port
land connection with steamer Nahootta
from llwaco and Long Beach points.
Telephone No. Ill,
A. ]. TAYLOR. Astoria Agent.
Il. w. CREIGHTON. Pprtlnnd Agent
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

George I, Hitchcock CurtISs. Wis
saws, "Foley's Kidney cure has been
tested ana found To be all YOU claim
for Il, | have given It To my father
and 1t is the only thing that ever helped
him" Hnrt's drug store
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Miss Mamie Smith. ot MiddlrSboro,
Ky, writes; My little sister had the
'roun very had gave her several
doses of Foley's Honey and Tar and she
was instantly relieved, II saved her
life" Harts drug store
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Spring coughs ore ,peclally danger
Gus and unless cured at once, serious
results often follow. one Minute Cough
Cure acss Ike magic, II is not COM
mon mixture but Is a high grade REM
edy. CHAS. ROGERS, Druggist.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

The new attorney general OF the
United States is said to keep II string Of
fast trotters.' one way to kill a trust In
horses Is U bet a good deal ON them.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Is ii not about time for some person
near enough to the umpire to make him.
self heard to ask what dowager en-
press An is doing in the game anyway?
Mr.. Stead says that England will
have to fight America or De humila-
ted. She has tried Il twice and hu-
initiation has followed the fighting both
times
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

The Astorian guarantees to Its ad-
vertisers the largest circulation Of any
newspaper published on the Columbia
river.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02
WITH THE PARAGRAPHERs.

The new capitol at Olympia is to have
wings. 50 Tacoma need not despair.
The capitol may fly to Wright park yet.
-Whatcom Revellle.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

II You are sick all over and don't
know JUST what ais you. iIs ten to
one your kidneys are out of order Fo-
ley's Kidney cure will bring YOU health
ana energy. Hart's drug store.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

You canno, enjoy perfect health, rosy
cheeks and sparkling eyes II your liver
IS sluggish and your bowels clogged De
wits Little Early Rlsers cleanse the
whole system, Thy never grippe. CHAS.
ROGERS, Druggist.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

The United States treasury has ac-
quired a machine that counts $1,000 in
quarters in eight minutes. Some Of the
banks and Pullman porters are also
thinking Of employing the device
Chicago Journal.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Senator'S Tillman and McLaurin are not
exchanging the kind Of salutations that
the public is accustomed to expect from
representative citizens Of South Caro-
lima.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Buffalo Bill proposes to start an Tn
ternational Academy Of Rough Riders"
and 1t might be asked if he is trying
to close up all the other schools for
boys in North America.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

The communication signed "Abram
Anderson" which appeared in The AS
torlan a few days ago. was not writ
ten by any member Of The Astorlan
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

And now the able Democratic editors
have discovered that President McKin-
ley's trip TO the coast is to be regal
pilgrimage Washington Post.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Will the cruiser Milwaukee be chris.
tened with wine? Perish the thought!
1t really cannot be- There is only one
beverage suitable to the name-the
stuff that made Milwaukee famous
Kansas City Star.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

If Morgan. Rockefeller and the Van
derbilts should combine We would be in
the fix the canary found herself. In the
kitty.-Minneapolis Journal.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

That the spirit Of William Tell Is yet
alive is shown by the action Of a French
commdne which wants 10 abolish the
high hat as a symbol of oppressive arls-
tOpTacV
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Cock fighting Is a passion with the
Filipinos. which may or may not make
a transition 10 taking interest In the
American election rooster easy.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Buffalo's exposition buildings have
been through two hurricanes and one
flood, but will be thrown open to the
public on May 20. only a few days be-
hinl time.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

When the assassins sail from Amer
lea to take the lives Of European mon
archs they are simply returning to
their natural sphere.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02
The Wisconsin Central Lines

and you will make direct connections
at st. Paul for Chicago, Milwaukee and
all points East
For any further information call on
any ticket sgent, or correspond with
JAS. c. POND. Gen. Pass. Ag't.,
or JAS. A. CLOCK, Milwaukee wis
General Agent,
THE CHICAGO & NORTHWESTERN
RAILWAY.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Count Tolstci takes his expulsion from
Russia very quietly. Being expelled Is
a different matter from being put out.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Skin troubles. cuts, burns, scalds and
chafilg quickly heal by the use Of De
Wits Witch Hazel Salve II Is imi
tated. Be sure you get De Wits
CHAS. ROGERS, Druggist.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

The legislatures Of Minnesota and
other states are trying to reform the
marriage laws. This will be found to
be a much tougher proposition than
assessment and taxation.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Mr.. Bryan leaves it to be clearly un-
derstood that he is ready to sacrifice
himself again if the party insists upon
thus sacrificing itself.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

The good roads movement Is a sort
NJ cup-hearer FOR rural flee delivery,
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Mrs. Nation refuses to ride in 4 car
where there is an AK strapped on the
wall bearing the placard. ITO be used
only in case OF fire"
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Speculative stocks have gained 50
much in value recently that by next
Christmas there will be no place 10
hang the stockings
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02
YAMHILL DIVISION.
Passenger depot foot Of Jefferson A.

Leave for oswego daily at 7:2O. 'S;GS
a: m; 1890 1855, 3:25, Sis, e:25 sos.
1880 p. M. and a. m. on Sunday
only. Arrive at Portland daily at 'S:SS.
6:30, 1850 a. M: 1885, 3:l5. 1890. 6:2o.
G4O. 1000 p. m: 1910 a. m. daily ex.
ccept Monday; $3.50 and 1905 a. m. ON
Sundays only.
Leave for Dallas daily. except Sum
day. at 1880 .. m. Arrive at Portland
at $3.50 a. m.
Passenger train leaves Dallas for
Airlee Mondays. Wednesdays and FRI
days at 2:45 .. m. Returns Tuesdays.
Thursdays and Saturdays.
Except Sunday.
r. KoEHLER, Manager
c. H. MARKHAM,
Gen. Frt. and Pass. AT.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

London reports that Shakespeare as a
theatrical venture has nor been prof
table there Of late. That. in fact. as a
play bill the immortal William s los
ing caste
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02
TO PREVENT PNEUMONIA AND
GRIP.

Laxative Bromo- Quinne removes the
CauSe
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

The simultaneous action OF Denver
and Japan against rats has nearly eN-
hausted the visible supply of rough
on them
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

II there's big ship-huillirg combine
launched is hard 20 exclude the idea
Of stocks AMI water In connection with
%
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Those famous little pills. DeWl;t's Lit
tie Early Risars. will remove all i'm
purities from your system, cleanse your
bowels. make them regular. CHAS
ROGERS. Druggist.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02
Arrive
Leave

Depot. Fifth and
Leave Streets. Arrive
Overland Express
Trains for Salem.
Roseburg, Ash
land. Sacramento.
't.JO pm Ogden. San Fran 1915 a. m
cisco. Mojave. Los
Angeles. FL Paso.
$3.50 am New Orleans and 200 o. m
the East.
At Woodburn
daily except sun
train connects with
train for Mt. An
gel. Silverton.
ownsvlllc,
Springfield and
Natron. and even
Ing train for Mt.
Angel and Silver
ton.
1880 am Corvallis passen- $50 D. m
ger.
I4:5O PM Sheridan passen- lIs:25a IN
ger.
DAILY Daily except Sunday.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02
MY SISTERS BABY

My baby is full of abounding
life and joy; my sisters boy is
a puny thing.
The difference is: my baby
is healthy. He takes his fill
and sleeps; and he grows.
My sisters boy gets fully as
hungry, he cries with hunger;
then cries, | think it must be,
from weakness; his food is a
burden to him.
SCOTS emulsion of cod-liver
oil will set that poor little boy
in the way Of being as good as
his cousin.
Wen send youa little to try, Hyou like.
SCOTT & BOVINE 4oq Pearl street. New York
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

our girls may 80 abroad ~ lind huS'
bands, hu; men usually like to Nnj th,,
wives at home.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

The French girl who Is shedding
needles ought to be able 20 give PreSl-
dent Louhet some valuable pointers
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

II is certainly not tn, much tn say
that for grave disgcrs to strik' looks
like running the thing into he ground.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Arkansas Is about to try the plan Of
licensing dram-drinkerS at S. each
Look out for a congested treasury,
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Aguinaldo and his millions will be
bidding each other goodby one Of these
days unless he shall curb his appetite
for diamonds Aggie is going the siren
uous pace that invariably comes to
grief
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Mrs Nation viii W ,o Jail without
protest rs rcsul, Ut her latest arrest
She has an AK to grind,
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Severu statesmen are impressed with
the feeling that in political life the swan
song IS not so effective as the carol of
the early bir1.-Washington Star.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Advertising rates can he had on ap-
i'caticr - the business manager.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Hyde Park club ladies' ask for assls-
tance in cleaning that suburbs streets.
The ladies do the best they can, but
their skirts sweep up only a part Of
the filth on the streets. Chicago Trib-
une
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

The empress dOwager's appointment
of syndicate 20 govern China Is an
experiment that gives promise Of great
diplomatic possibilities.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02
TEkMs OF SUBSCRIPTION.
DAILY.

6ert by mail. per year...,......"$6,OO
Sent by mail, per month........." so
Served by carrier. per month";" so
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

For some unknown reason the car
was not shot at yesterday. 1t may be
that the Amalgamated Association OF
Assassins took a day off-Mail and Ex-
press
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

How many Of those who have been
criticising Adelbert Hay would have
been willing to sacrifice $4,000 in order
to serve their country as consul at Pre-
tOria?-BuffalO Express
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02
sEMI-WEEKLY

Sent by mail, per year in advance. $500
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

The Democrats Of Denver have reach
ei that state when they do not seem TO
care whether trouble comes or not. They
have nominated a woman for city clerk.
Philadelphia Inquirer.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

Naturally the English Tories are
amazed and indignant that Russia
should he so greedy and unscrupulous
aS TO grab territory. .-Pittsburg Dis
patch
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02

If Mrs. Nation is a Judge Of bad art
and desires to inaugurate a crusade
against it she does not need to confne
her operations 20 the saloons s.-Kansas
City Star.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1901-05-02
sHeRIrFs SALE

March sSth. 1901
St. Tammany farmer., 1901-08-24
SOME SHEEP NOTES.

Sheep husbandry will always be
regarded as one of the great indus
tries which are at once an incident
and leading factor in the prosperity
of every civilized country.
Admitting that fat sheep are the
most tempting to butchers and deal
ers, the man who owns the sheep is
the man who should determine when
he should sell and what he will sell.
Grain, when used in reasonable
quantities, is all right, but many a
good lambs growth has been ruined
and many a mature sheep killed
through ignorance of the proper use
of same.
Don't for moment think of
breeding from ram deficient back OF
the shoulders. We get very large
puer cent. Of lambs defective at that
point even when sired by symmetri-
cal animals.
The flock of sheep will not only
paw for themselves directly in their
wool and mutton. but they will indi-
rectly benefit the land and crops.
They are of inestimable value in tho
clover and grass pastures, and even
in the orchard where their little feet
will press down the grass roots SO the
soil will cling better to them.
The man who labors to improve
the sheep and its fleece, so as to bet
ter fit It to meet the requirements OF
mankind, is of the most benefcent
character. for Il means cheap food
and clothing for the masses, and or
the best quality. While therefore,
the breeder is striving to better his
own condition, he is conferring 3
lasting benefit upon the country at
large.
St. Tammany farmer., 1901-08-24
WIT AND WISDOM.
He who flatters you is your enemy
-Cardan.

He who aatters you is your enemy.
-Cardan.
We cannot always oblige, but we can
always speak obligingly.-Voltaire.
"Yes, sir, he puts water in his whis-
ky" Well" "No, cistern. ."-Cleve-
land Plain Dealer.
The tree that bears the most fruit to
market is said to be the axle-tree.-
Chicago Daily News.
The truth is often bitter pill; al
most never does it come in the popular
tabloid form.-Detroit journal.
"What's the matter with you lately?
Has she thrown you over?" "No; that's
just what she refuses to do."1Town
and Country.
Lady Ito departing servant)-"What
shall l say in your reference?" Serv-
ant-''Just that 1 stood it for six
months with you, mum-that'll do for
me."-London Tit-Bits.
Mrs. Wicks-"When my husband
says anything, have to take it with
grain of salt" Mr.. Hicks-"When my
wife says anything, have to take 1T
with good many grains of pepper.
Sommerville journal.
Mr.. Saphedde-'1 asked you for your
daughters hand once before, sir; but
you said she was too young, and have
waited" Mr.. Crusty-"You've wait
ed too long, young man; she's too old
now."-Ohio State journal.
"Your conversation, Mr.. Hevviman,"
said Miss Peppery, suppressing
yawn, reminds me of some cham
pagne." "Ah!" exclaimed Hevviman.
much pleased, $50 sparkling as that?"
No. but it's extra dry" y."-Philade,phia
Press.