Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1901-02-15
OUR HOUSE OF LORDS.

UUk HOUSE OF LOKDS.
IT is SIMPLY AN OFFICIAL MIL
LIONAIRES' CLUB.
Medicines" Galore Paid for by Our Beneficent
Uncle Samuel-The Luxuries of Nero are
| None too Good for Our Senators-AII Have
Sinecure Positions to Farm Out to Relatives
or Friends -Inkstands that Cost $1,000 and
"sIumber Robes" Made to Order.
The United States Senate, popularity
dubbed "The Mlllionaires' Club" is
the cheapest club in the world for the
poor man to join. Its perquisites,
daily increasing, are too enormous for
reckoning. Nevertheless, its extrava-
gance cannot be brought to the door
OF any particular party, Administra-
ton or Congress. The Senate is per-
petual body; its perquisites have been
of perpetual growth since the birth of
the nation.
The newly prepared report OF the
Secretary of this dignified body reveals
some amusing facts. 1t shows, for in
stance, that local drug firm received
in the last fiscal year more than 81 700
for medicines and toilet articles.
These were supplied to the Senators
for their individual use and paid for
out of the generous pocket OF Uncle
Sam. At the rate of $500 per head,
each Senator should have kept cleanly
and healthy during the few months
employed at the Capitol. No small
item OF this expenditure was one
thousand doses of bromo-seltzer and
bromo-cafieine.
The reading public, of course, is too
charitable to regard such purchase
as at all suggestive OF lax morals. But
these figures are fish in the nets OF the
prohibitionist spies now said to be
shadowing the "powers that be-"
Three dozens OF caffeine powders, four
cases of lithia water, two bottles Of
bromo-lithia and $270 worth OF lithia
tablets further contributed to keeping
the Senatorial system in good repair.
Twelve pounds of soda-mint tablets
were purchased for the alienation of
"that dark-brown taste" and the ex-
travagant sum of so cents was ex-
changed for certain widely-advertised
tabules for indigestion. A quart OF
castor oil was purchased doubtless for
the conservative element who adhere
to prompt and old-fashioned methods
of righting a wrong. And, after all,
why should not the benefcent tax
payer encourage and contribute to the
publication of the liver Of every pub
lie man wont to make himself heard
upon current questions?
Six pounds of pomade were needed
for the plastering down Of Senatorial
cow-licks, and one dozen boxes OF
black grease were consumed in the
hiding of gray streaks in Senatorial
mustaches.
Fourteen thousand quinine pills, or
163 for each Senator, made small
item for q city where malaria and
grippe are notoriously rampant. Add
two pounds of cough lozenges. one
pound OF chloride of potash and two
bottles of "gargling OIL" In spite Of
such . supply Of preventives, a bottle
of antikamnia was further demanded
by some distinguished neuralgia head,
and five pounds Of snuff by some dis
tinguished influenza-infected probos-
els.
| But this was not the end OF Uncle
Sans generosity in warding off Sena-
torial colds. 1t has long been his Gus.
tom TO send members of the upper
house snugly home in hired carriages
whenever it rains, halls or SHOWS.
An undertaken is usually favored with
the contract. During the blizzard OF
last winter 1882 was spent thus in one
day. The total bill for extra carriage
hire during the year was $461. In
view of the fact that the Senate pays
for the funeral expenses OF all men,
bers dying in Office, there doubtless is
considerable economy in such pre-.
cautions in the way of medicines and
supply of vehicles at public expense.
The funeral OF the late Senator Nor
rill cost the government $3,2O5.79.
OF this the railroads received over
$4,000, the undertaken 500, local
quartette choir $40, decorator $l25,
while $500 was paid for Grape, ribbons,
gloves and regalia. Five thousand
dollars in addition was presented to
the heirs OF this Senator, and, in the
same year, an equal amount was voted
to heirs Of two former Senators who
had died. An employee was given
81 500 for injuries received while on
duty in the Senate. The same balm
was voted to the widow of another,
killed while at work. A laborer, hurt
while working in the Capitol grounds,
was voted $3.50 toward his doctors
bill.
The upper chamber is more gener-
GUS in salaries than any institution in
the country, public or private. To
each Senator there are four employees,
in various capacities. This consti-
tutes considerable of patronage, inn
mediately in the north wing of the
Capitol, for those in power. Thus the
smaller body of Congress has come to
cost Uncle Sam twice as much per
| n,emher ner annum a0 the House,