The Sunday globe., 1901-07-21

IluG Ndntr anu lutg Seully MulnpSl Gu
in my ear that as yet they had found
out nothing, and probably never would,
as there was nothing to find out. |
then asked what was their opinion Of
a certain Mr.. Gould. One of them an
swered, and he spoke for the rest, and
said shat Gould was a conceited ass,
or, in other words, a man who had just
taken Office and had tried to make
showing and could not do it. The in
dictment, therefore, knocks me out and
tlckles Gould.
A great many people would like to
know why eX-Secretary Vanderlip made
such a quick exit from the Treasury
Department and took a trip across the
pond. Well, in the first place, Mr.. Van
derlip is like all the rest of the COM
munity-he values his life first Of all,
and then his money. Two weeks be-
fore Mr. Vanderlip left for Europe, two
gentlemen-one supposed to be crazy
tried to take his life, Il was then that
Mr., Vanderlip packed his trunk and
said, 81 don't care If you never come
back" One Of the men who tried to
present wings to the Secretary was a
young fellow who had tried to get a
position in the Department and had
been turned down, like a good many
others. And so he determined to get
even, sharpened his knife, crept into
the private Office, and was just in the
murderOus act when one of Mr. Van.
derlip's dearest secretaries entered a
side door, grappled with the man. and
nailed him to the floor In the mean.
time half Of the Department came rush
ing in and pounced upon the would-be
murderer What an awful moment for
Vanderlip, who sat quivering in his
chair, almost afraid to arise, after the
man had been put out. Now the young
secretaries in that Office hold lifelong
position, if they wish to accept it,
which / think they will do. Even to
this day, if you go into the office and
look behind the desks where the secre-
taries are stationed you will find pis-
tolls and murderous looking knives.
Who has not heard of Sapho? Not
the Olga Nethersole Sapho, but the
young queen who has fine position in
the Census Bureau. She is tall, hand
some, and has a splendid figure. She
wears tailor-made suits, Zaza slippers
and imported hose. She has such
cute way with her that seems to de-
light the masculine sex and make en-
emies OF the feminine.
If you want to get into hot water,
ask some of the girls if they do not
think mat Sapho is handsome. Then
you will find out where you are. One
young lady, who lisped, said that
"Sapho was per feet ly horrid." Take
care young ladies; if you want to have
the friendship Of your girl friends,
you had better let the men drop,
After Congress had adjourned, Sen
atOr Beveridge, the gentleman from
Indiana, left on a tour to New York,
where he must have had quite a fine
time. l remember the day very dis
tinctly. That day ! was passing
through the B. g. o. station, and some
one gave me a hard slap on the back
and asked me how l was getting on
with life. ] turned around, and there
stood the young Senator, handsome,
and attracting as much attention as
ever. OF course | was glad to see him,
and | told him so. Well" said he. IF
that is the case, loan me a few dollars,
as | am dead broke" | asked him what
he had done with his money, and he
said, Oh, l have just been enjoying
myself in the City of Wealth. only a
few dinners and theaters, don't.you-
know-it soon mounts up" Well, |
was a little shy myself, but l let him
have a hundred or so. And then he
soon departed on a trip abroad, as he
said, to study finance. | think 1t would
have been good thing for him to have
started earlier in life. The reason that
this is 80 fresh in my memory is be-
cause have just received check for
the full amount from him.
Judge Cox, ex-judge OF the District
Supreme Court, is still on earth, with
his funny jokes. When he tells them
not a soul laughs but himself. OF
course, one or two of the students will
give him the merry "ha! hal" occasion
ally, just TO make the old man feel
good, and also to make him hurry over
with his lecture, which proves very
tiresome. You know the Judge is now
the dean Of Columbian, not of the Dis
trlct. but the law school, and he is also
a professor Of law.
Even kings can not get away from
human nature, and the trits old saying
that once a trader always trader APP
plies with equal force TO the ruler Of
England. King Edwards eagerness TO
keep apace with the events of the spec
ulative world is so keen as to have led
him TO put in a private wire in his
apartments in Windsor Castle; in fact,
to the establishment of a general in
formation bureau. And the best Of it
is that the information comes largely
through an American stock and news
ticker, There is also a private tele-
phone and telegraph wire, likewise
American, that may be connected by a
switchboard with trunk lines and
cables to remote colonies and to the
great centers of the world, In the
smoking room adjoining His Majesty's
apartments is a sort Of quotation
board, provided with pegs, on which
slips of news are stuck by an attend.
ant. The king does not watch the
tape, as our great and little operators
do. hanging over IL by the hour, but
looks at the slips when interest impels.
The pegs on this board are marked