The Van Buren press., 1901-05-25
A QUESTION OF INTENT.
How a Sub9hief Obeyed His superb.
Or's Orders to the Very
Letter.

In one of the executive departments
not a thousand miles from the Star
building, a young man fresh from the
plains of the southwest was appoint
ed a subchief in one of the divisions,
says that Washington paper.
He had a misunderstanding with
one of the clerks few days after
his advent, and he was instructed by
his superior to discipline the clerk,
as the latter happened to be in the
wrong.
"You must discipline him. Not
harshly, but sit down on him proper
w." said the chief of division.
81 don't like to do that" replied
tho Texan.
"We can't take our likes and dis
likes into consideration in govern
ment service in the administration OF
our duties" advised the chief. "Give
him gentle dressing down, and then
sit down on him quick and hard"
81 hate to do it."
Cant help it. It's your duty. He
is in room by himself. No one Will
hear or see you. 1t will be good
practice for you, as you will have to
do it often. He's little fellow,
too"
"That's the worst of it. If he were
my size, I'd like the sport better
than branding and roping steers.
However, having been a deputy sher-
if, know what my duty means.
When I was told to go out and get
n cattle rustler or bad cowboy,
I usually got him, even IL he came
back to the courthouse feet first.
You're boss, so here goes. / hate to
do it,"
"Nonsense," exclaimed the chief.
cts nothing. Report to me what
he said"
About a half hour later the sub
chief entered his superiors room.
His face was scratched, and his
clothing apparently somewhat rum
pied. Otherwise, his usually serious
demeanor was unchanged.
81 sat on that clerk for Is min
utes," he said, quietly.
"What?" shouted his chief.
81 sat on him for Is minutes by
the clock. For little fellow he put
up a stiff fight. bucked him, bound
him and almost branded him from
force of habit. But 1t was easy"
"My God!" gasped the other man.
"You said to be gentle with him,
you know"
"Holy smoked" cried the chief,
nearly fainting. "You obeyed my or
ders literally! I meant for you to
sit on him fguratively."
"You didn't say word about fig
ures," responded the ex-cowboy, sui
lenly.
81 didn't say for you to sit down
on him literally"
"You didn't say at all where | was
to sit down on him, but sat there
all right said the former cowpunch-
err, desperately.
mo, no, you don't understand"
said the chief, when he had recovered
his breath. "You must not take
everything in a literal sense in WASH
ington. You are not chasing cows
or frontier bandits and you mustn't
be so serious. When you are ordered
to sit down on clerk II means In
q fgurative sense only, and you
should give him, to be thoroughly ex-
plicit this time, good talking to
with your mouth. You mustn't nctu-
ally sit on him. n this gets out, we
will be the laughing stock Of the Of
fee, must fix II up at once"
It was fixed up" by sticking
patches OF soothing plaster on the
little clerks wounded body and feel
ings by the positive promise Of .
promotion to the next vacancy occur.
ring In the division II he kept quiet.
The ex-cowboy squared himself by
treating the clerk and his chief to
lunch for fortnight. II was Mt one
OF these lunches that they told a
Star man oil about II, and the joke
| In y,,o p,,Od to keen.