The Washington times., 1901-12-01
Consul Tells Of Life in the
Dreamy East.
DINING is THE CHIEF PASTIME.
The Amenities OF Semi celestial
Banquet = Stewed Doves Too
Much for the Taste and Senti-
ment of an Irish Guest.

constellation Of American CoDsuls, is back
from the drowsy East to the Washington
he loves so well Francis Wilson used to
say of Hub" that wherever in the world
there is an inhuman orchestra they are
sure to play Hubs famous "Oh, Listen to
My Tale of Woe" Smith also pleads
guilty to writing "If You Love Me, Dar-
ling, Tell Me With Your Eyes" as well as
Swinging in the Grapevine Swing" MI.
Smith was found the other night in his
cczy bachelor quarters in G Street, taking
before-dinner nap.
He came into his parlor garbed IN a
most impossible to imagine Japanese
kimono of vivid blue gold and scarlet,
embroidered with double headed snakes, a
griffen thrown in here and there, and a
few one-legged cranes.
Nerves all right?" enquired Hub"
Sure you can stand fer this" indicating
the kimono. well, I'm glad friend
of mine dropped in here one even
ing for sympathy. You see, he had been
up against it the night before When I
entered with this robe on he gazed at the
things on 1t and made a wild bolt for the
door. Thought he had 'em for fair"
Hubs" long absence abroad has not
changed him particle, and he tossed the
ball of conversation in his usual airy
manner
Charming life that living in the East"
he said. You know 1 was at Kobe first
and then went to Canton. was there
rphap tho (sbinava tbra,- 5o,,n +hotr 5os
to the civilized world. All the foreigners
organized themselves into a defence
corps and we were prepared at all times
to hold our end up against the Boxers.
But you don't want tale of war, do
you? Shall tell you of the dreamy side
of existence In the Orient? My boy, 1
never realized the value of Owen Mere
there. Dining was the principal amusc
ment of US foreign devils
Every evening somebody gave a di1rc.
1t promoted good fellowship and maie -.s
all feel like one family, far away rom
home and mother"
Smith reached over TO a pile of photo
graphs and showed hashlight picture of
Fourth of July. The host was standing,
with a glass of champagne in one hand,
the other pointing to a big American flag
draped above him. My favorite atti-
tude," laughed Hub" II was respond
ing to toast to the United States"
ooh, what an evening that was! When
I finished telling the representatives of
resources, wealth. brains and power, and
what she'd do to the rest of the world
some day, some Of them looked visit
fully at the carving knife near me.
'The English Consul, a jolly good fell
low, arose and said to me: For Heav-
ems sake, old one, leave us bit of some
thing, won't you? Don't take the whole
damned map There's some of the
things we had to eat that evening""
added Hub" tossing out a menu card.
Bird nest soup. stewed shark fins.
pigeon eggs with walnuts. red sea weed
soup. leven rolls. fried chicken and water
chestnuts. pate de foie gras. and stewed
doves.
"Ah. those stewed doves" sighed Smith,
still"
"Apropos of those stewed doves. One
of my guests was a little Irishman who
ate more of this dish than anybody else.
Toward the shank of the evening, when
everything was 'mellering' as Mr.. Wegg
would say. my Irish friend got very in
dignant at the idea of serving the song
sters at dinner How we'll remember
the intensely serious look on his intense
ly comical face, as he said:
Hub, me bye, the laws of hospitali-
tee air sacred, but tbs a shame to high
hiven to imprison so sweet a burrud as a
dove in your stomach. and I'll always
regyard ye as a cruel man. Now, had ye
served some of that aigle ye've been
howlin' about, or lion sthalse'-here he
glared ferociously at all the Englishmen-
'Pd have jined ye wild pleasure, but a
pore little dove'-and he burst'd into
tears. The next day he sent around the
first thing to my cook for the recipe.
Talking OF that dinner reminds me of
a funny incident connected with it. 1t is
the custom to serve as an appetizer a
pate de foie gras and glass Of Spanish
sherry, and on this occasion | so instruct
ed my cook. Here is the letter received
from him regarding the matter. The let
ter was written in peculiar, but perfectly
legible English. 1t read;
Dear Master-My cousin he tell me
the pate dc foie gras bein' all out, you
won't catch more You invite him on his
paper may l know. Foie gras him cost
sl75 per tin; sardine him cost 10 cents
per tin l think more better catch sar-
dine.
''How's that" asked Smith. "for pigeon
English from an economical Chinaman?'
Another time I received a 'hurrah
touch from my Chinese boy, in the
shape Of note in which I was called the
light of heaven, the moonborn one, etc,
and ended by asking for IS. Yes indeed,
the Chinese are up-to-date."
Smith paused in the conversation to
hand his visitor a box of sandal wood,
bound in yellow silk the imperial color.
1t contained sunburst, or ninety y-and-
nine pointed star. as Smith termed it,
about the size of fried egg, fashioned of
gold and silver. Two dragons of gold
most eXquisitely carved eolled them
selves around an immense sapphire of
most translucent blue, their heads meeting
under a pink pearl. In the centre of the
star appears an inscription In Chinese.
Setting forth my noble virtues" ex-
planned Smith. 1T is the order of the