Evening star., 1901-09-07

gray beard into place: us that good gum
you have there-will it hold that beard
securely?" 'Will it hold? It's the strong
est gum ever made-it can hold a horse.
l have hard work to get 1t to dissolve
nights with pure alcohol!'' This, while
the guilty one was writhing with that
malicious Joy known In it's fullness to the
practical joker alone.
Worthy of His Praise.
The victim rushed from the room and
reached the stage at the very moment his
cue was spoken, and made his entrance so
short Of breath he could scarcely speak.
The act was very long.-the gum in his
shoes dried nicely-the curtain fell. He
went below to his room to dress for the
street He tried to remove and lay aside
his patent feathers. Alas! alas! he laid
aside instead his manners, his temper, his
self-restraint, his self-respect! The gum
proved itself worthy OF his praise-it stuck
lit held! The shoes were willing to come
OF on one condition only-that they brought
both sock and skin with them. Three men.
with tears In their eyes, had pencils and
kept tally of his remarks as he danced
about after each frantic tug at glued-on
shoe. One took down every wounding, ma
lfcious word. A second caught and pre-
served every defamatory word. While the
third-the busiest One-secured every pro-
fame word that fell from his enraged lips.
Finally, he poured the contents of the al
c0hol bottle into his shoes and, swearing
like madman, waited for the gum to sof
ten. And the manager, who was not deaf
proved that his heart was harder than the
best gum and could not be softened at all.
To this day no member Of the company
knows how much Of the victims salary was
left to him that week after forfeits for bad
words were all paid up. But some good
came from the affair, for the actor was
never again so late in arriving as not to
have time to look into his shoes for any
strange substance possibly lurking there.
A Bright Signal.
Personally, I detest the practical joke,
but I have, alas! never been above enjoy
ing my share of the green room fun. Some
members Of Mr.. Dalys company were very
stately and dignified, and he would have
been glad had we all been like them; but
there were others who would have had fun
with the tombs of the Egyptian kings. and
who could wiring smiles from craven i'm
age. Mr.. Daily levied fines at last so reck-
lessly that either the brakes had to be put
upon our fun or some one would have to
DO picket duty. The restless element had q
wait of an entire long act in one play.
and among those who waited was a tiny
little bit of an old. old man. He wore rags
In his part" and on the seat of his trous-
ers was an enormous red patch. He had
been asked to stand guard in the green
room door, and nothing loath, he only ar
gued deprecatingly: You'll all get caught
I'm afraid. You see. Mr. Da1y's so sharp
IL L cough ne III near me, tOO-anu Will un-
derstand. If 1 signal-he'n see me, and
Well all get fined.''
For a moment we were silently cast
down. Then l rose to the occasion beau
tifully. l took the wee little man and
placed him in the green room doorway
leaning with his back against the door
Jamb. When he saw Mr.. Daily in the dis
tance he simply was to turn his bright
red patch toward us-we would do the
rest. 1t was a glorious success. We kept
an eye on the picket and when the red
patch danger signal was shown silence
fell upon the room. Forfeits ceased for a
long time. OF course We paid our watch
man for his services. Paid him in pies!
He has a depraved passion for bakers
pies, which he would not cut into por-
tions. because he said it spoiled their
fiavor-he preferred working his way
through them-and that small gray face
rim was closing gently about his ears,
was sight to make a supreme justice
smile. But our evil course was almost
run. Our little pie eater, who was just a
touch odd or what people call queer"
on Thanksgiving day permitted himself
to be treated by SO many drivers of pie
wagons that at night he was fearful and
fully for the coming of Mr.. Daly-while
We laughtngly listened to a positively
criminal parody on 1.-The Bells'-watched
for and saw him In ample time, he, alas,
confusedly turned his red patch the wrong
way, and We all came to grief and forfeit
ure in consequence. Yes, obliging people
very generous and ever ready to give a
our social condition. I may say, is one Of
good-mannered informality, of joliity tenn
pered by respect and genuine good fel-
lowship. CLARA NORRIS.