Evening star., 1901-02-02
AS 1T Really HAPPENED

The rotund, red-c Checked. white-side-whis-
kered portly. digui6ed-looking man with
the silk hat, the fine overcoat and the
ivory-handled cane, rfstosd on the bank.
watching the nimble lads and lasses as they
circled and flew ,pJer the pond on their
skates. His face was wreathed in smiles.
We'll do remember," "~he appeared to be
saying to himself my own days at that
sport. The sight lof!,these joyous young
ones brings it all back to me-"
Son. said he to boy who skated up
to where he was standing, in order to ad-
just one of his club skates, how do you
put those new-fangled things on, anyhow"
why. you just slip your shoes into 'em
and tighten 'em up, sir" replied the lad
smiling at the old gentleman.
Don't you bore a hole in your heel with
glmlet any more, and then screw the
skate on?' inquired the rubicund. portly
man
No. sir: those are the old-fashioned kind
OF SKATES These are club skates. All the
fellows have club skates nowadays, and
even the girls 's
:. Now. Nov is that so?" said the portly man
do change: Now, how do you brace your
ankles with those highfalutin' contraptions?
we useo to nave lot Of straps passing
over eI, our ankles to brace them"
without any ankle braces, sir,' replied the
boy.
DO. huh?" said the old gentleman.
wen. with all due respect to you and
your generation. son, the boys of this day
aren't any shiftier on their feet than the
poys or my day were. Fact Is, although
naVent done any skating for nigh on to
Iorty-nve years, I believe that 1 can get
along Just as well on the ice at this mo-
ment as l could when was a shaver. Just
let me try those skates Of yours on, VIII
you, my boy?" and the old gentleman dug
mis- fingers into his change pocket and pro-
duced quarter. which he handed to the
BOY, VINO promptly sat down on the bank
and TOOK Off his skates, handing them over
to the old gentleman. The lad was a tall
poy' with slzable feet, and the old gentle
mans feet were unusually small. so that
the skates htted all right. The boy locked
them on with his key and the old gentle
man stood up and walked slowly out to
the Ice. Ihere was a confident smile on
his rosy face, and all of the boys and girls
on the pond gathered round to see the fun.
Holding his fvory-handled cane out in
front OF him at arms length the rotund old
Now, right here, according to all existing
humorous canons. the rotund old gentle
man ought to skate on one foot, with a
long. graceful glide. right out to the middle
OF the pond, and there begin to spin around
like Norwegian professional, and cut ig
ure-of-eight knots. and spread eagles. and
perfect circles. and things like that. Then
he should skate gracefully back, where the
chagrined boys are still standing, remove
his skates and say. the while the young
sters look foo ish. We'll. boys, guess I'm
not such an old man yet, eh?''
However, facts are facts, and the gentle
reader Is respectfully referred to a hole
about eight feet by twelve right on the
northwestern edge of the lake If he de-
sires to ascertain what actually happenoS
to the rotund, red-cheeked whites de-
whskered. portly, dignifiedlooking man
with the silk hat, the fine overcoat and the
ivory-handled cane, who was so unwise as
to think that barking back mentally and
physically for period covering forty-five
years are one and the same thing.