River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1901-07-11

Jugger. THE good man said she
was. And she'll give all the milk
all you can get from her. He said So"
Woman" retorted Jugger. with
all the dignity that a badly-kicked
man is capable of assuming, you
don't know what you are talking
about! 1t is the strangeness of the
place that makes the cow irritable.
III lead her to the barn, and when
she finds herself in comfortable
quarters, like those, doubtless, to
which she has been accustomed, she'll
be as gentle as a dove. See how
anxious she is to be released
The animal had been surging and
jerking at the rope, and as soon as
he got her united a little Wild West
performance began. The COW would
make a start, and Jugger, eXerting
all his strength, would check her.
She'd plunge and he'd hold; she'd
plunge again and he would hold her
at the expense of having his arms
nearly dragged out by the roots.
Baked in an attempt to rush down
the road, the cow dashed in at the
open gate. Jugger checked her head
long rush toward the cabbage patch
by twisting the rope around the gate
post.
A happy thought struck him. He
would make moose in the free end
of the rope, and when she started to-
ward the barn, he would let her go
and stop her at the proper time by
| flinging the moose over a convenient
post. The cow was only excited and
would soon become calm.
| Just as the loop was made the cow
started BARNARD in an unreserved
fashion. and Jugger did not attempt
to check her, but charged along with
her, holding on to the rope, and taxi
ing siX-foot jumps to keep up, and
grinning at the thought of how the
rope would bring her to time when
he flung the loop over the post. Just
then he thrust his foot into hole,
tumbled down, got his foot into the
Moose somehow. and the next instant
our poor friend was scrubbing across
the lot dragged by one leg.
The weight, instead of proving any
drag TO the cow seemed rather to
add to her enthusiasm, and when she
reached the barn she whirled and
| dashed back again across the garden.
In vain Jugger attempted to grasp
anything within his reach. He only
succeeded in uprooting anything he
was able to catch.
stop her, Stop her!" he shrieked,
as we'll as he was able with his face
in the dirt.
Not feeling able to seize the cow
by the horns and fling her to the
earth, Mrs. Jugger grabbed a huge
and handy club and made dart at
the animal, with the intention of
cracking her over the head. But the
lady miscalculated the speed of the
COW, and. instead of hitting her,
gave Jugger a tremendous thump on
the back of the head that knocked
him senseless, and would have driven
his intellectual cocoanut into the
ground had he not been going so
/ fast. Round the house went the
COW like a horned whirlwind, with
the now unconscious Jugger drag
ging along behind like can on a
ours tail.
Two trellises were broken down. a
rose-bush was uprooted, and Mrs.
Jugger's prize Mexican cactus had
half of its spines raked off by Jug
gers body. Just as the COW began to
exhibit signs of quoting down lit
tie, and Jugger's senses began to
come crawling back, tramp dog
charged at the gate, and the perform
ance was repeated with many eXcit-
ing variations. The cabbages in the
garden were scrubbed loose, the ash
hopper knocked galley-west, and the
combination of man and dog and COW
dashed through the fat side of the
grape-arbor three times.
The intention of the dog seemed
to be to bite something, and when
he could not get hold of the cow, he
fastened on to Jugger somewhere
and hung till his teeth jerked loose.
They went through the cactus bed
again, broke down the only remain
ing trellS, ana knocked the Dig urn
in the front yard completely whap-
per- awed. Then, just as it seemed
as if Jugger's pelt was about to be
pulled off over his head, the COW
sped the front gate, and dashed out
of it, cracking Jugger against the
post on one side. and nearly knock
ing the dogs brains out on the other.
Down the road they went. and Jug
ger was scarcely visible for the dust.
Then, just before our friend be-
came the late Mr.. Jugger, the rope
came off from his leg somehow and
the COW went up the road and disap-
peared in a cloud of dust, with the
tramp dog clinging to her hairless
tail.
Mrs. Jugger gathered up the REM
nant of her husband and put it to
bed. While she was applying lini-
ment and court-plaster where they
would do the most good, another COW
cred wagon. drawn by another pair
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