The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1901-05-08
QUIET PAT. :.
Some Examples Of Irish Good F7,,,o,.

mcnt afteF all. One day he saw
bull attnck man, and he had to no
on his sides with both hands, Il
scene wasIs SO funny. After q time Il
animal turned his attention in anotl
er direction, and poor Pat, after g,
p!c!ing the heights, ca;ao down with
thump on the other side of the fence
He rubbed his wounds, and as he sal
to himself, Faith, I'm glad I had M
laugh when / did, or wouldn't hav
had ii lt all.
An lrlshman, newly appointed
crier in the County Court in Austral
ia. where there are many Chinese. wat
ordered by the Judge to summon q
witness to the stand.
Call for All Songl' " the com
mand. t,
Pat was puzzled for moment. Ho
glanced slyly at the Judge, aud found
him as grave as an undertaken. Then
turning to the spectators, he blandly
simpcred:
"Gintlemen, would any of you favor.
lis Honor with song?"
An lrishman took a. contract to dig
well. When he had dug about
twenty we feet down he came one
morning and found it had fallen in
aud that it was filled nearly to the
top.
Pat looked cautiously around and
saw that no pers IN was near, then
took off his hat and coat and hung
them on windlass, crawled into some !
bushes and awaited events.
ln a short time the noighbors dis
covered that the we'll had fallen in.
and, seeing Pats hat and coat on the
windlass, they supposed that he was
at the bottom Of the excavation.
Only a few hours Of brisk digging
cleared the loose earth from the we'll.
Just as the excavators had reached
the bottom and were wondering where
the body was, Pat came out Of the
bushes and good-naturedly thanked
the diggers for relieving him Of sor-
ry job Some Of the tired digeers
we're disgusted, but the joke was too
g0od to allow Of anything more than a
laugh, which followed promptly.
---------s | 4
The following took place in an a
American Court on one of the occa
sions of Naturalization which is
usual previous to general election:
Judge: "Do you know o Brien?" p
Irish Witness: eyes. soor."
Judge; "How long has he been in q
this country?" 81
Witness: "a little over five year"
Judge: "Is he man of good moral =,
::
Witness quite bewildered): "Shure. a,
'er Honor, don't know what moral
character means" =.
Judge: "Well, sir, 1 will talk more =
'lalnly to You. Does O'Brien stand re
air before the community?'
:, Witness completely nonplused) !.
by my sowl, don't apprehend
our m aning, your Honor u
Judge (rather irritated(: 81 mean =;
J, ask you, sir, if o Brien, the person co
no wants to be citizen, and for AZ v
nom you are witness, is good man :,
not?" ~
Witness: "Oh, an Why didn't you
ME that way before? To be sure do
IS a good man. Shure, an I've ~
en- him in ten fights durin the las. A., A.
70 years, an iv'ry time he licked his
an."
y gentleman seeing an Irishman re- MI
'vlng an embankment from DWELL ing
8 inquired: Patrick, What are You tau
ing?" - wa.
| am opening the cellar window. ma
be sure.' tioi
"A And what are you doing that !,
p fro,
n May il plaise your Honor said :
'flck, to let out the dark rist
'0mo years ago, in one of the Wes-, ant
otates OF America, an English strr
u an irishman and Scotchman it?
e found guilty Of murder and sem P
ced to death, but we're allowed tn sayi
lae Il the manner of death themselves. did
oootchman promptly chose to be @
sea ., on an ash ,ree;~ tho English you
chose nos, an oak, but Pat said: ssIe you
Place, your Honor, I'd rather be cut
x, Z On 9 gooseberry bush." mot
mat 9 not big enough said the p.
ge. n.
begorrs .hin, said Pat. ssO;'u] ing, i.