davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Barre evening telegram. (Barre, Vt.) 1898-19??, 1901-08-08

Tie Stanu1ng COuay IS as 1OIIOWS:
W. II. Spear, Graniteville, $3.50
Frank W. Jackson Barre, 5525
B. II. TownShend, Plaintield, 1875
Frank Norway, Waterbury, $50
Robert Kynoch, Barre, 500
j. Henry Moore, Barre, 425
William Ward. So. Barre, 325
Gordon Mcleod, Graniteville, 800
W. II. Buchanan, Barre, 275
Chas. ?. Mcknight. E. Mont
pelier, 200
Barre evening telegram. (Barre, Vt.) 1898-19??, 1901-08-08

FAIR TOMORROW
Boston, Aug. S.-Fair tonight and
Friday light southwest to west winds
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
WOMEN RUNNING STORES,
The Latter Day System of Sending
Bonnets ''On Approval' Is
Destructive.

The ''returners" is the title applied
to large and growing number of wom-
en- who deal with the department and
other retail stores who do business on
credit. So great has become the femi-
nine army deserving the new appella-
ton that store managers are consider
ing the desira biljty of making up
''black list'' for mutual protection. says
the Chicago Chronicle.
1.-THE women are having too much fun
at our expense" said a State street
man the other day. eve would give a
big price for remedy that would save
us without hurting the feelings or
costing us the patronage of the mad
ans and misses who seem to think we
have invited them to dabble promis-
cuously in our stocks"
The custom objected to is that by
which goods may be taken home ION
approval" The scheme operated well
at first, but soon women noticed that
there was no bar to ordering in guam
buying. 1t is quite the thing nova
DAVIS for matron of good financial
standing who wishes, say, new bon
net, to spend the day in ''shoppin g.
at downtown millinery emporiums
From each of a dozen she ordered a
choice piece of headgear sent up ION
approval" and when her husband
comes home at night she dons them
each in turn and tries to obtain his in
dorsement of the most expensive
Failing that, she works ''down grade
until he throws up both hands, Or per-
haps she has similar "trying-on bee''
with her female friends for critics.
In any event, II of the ~ bonnets
are sent back the next day. without
| any cash to pay the storekeeper for the
wear and tear incidental to the trip his
pet CONNECTIONS have taken-"on ap-
prevail After few excursions of this
nature he is obliged to retire the bon
net from exhibition and charge it's cost
to profit and loss.
IF these 'returners' don't have more
pity they'll send me to Kankakee,' -
walled a sufferer. "I'd go back to the
cash down system, but that would
mean prompt loss of my trade to my
rivals. Oh, for a Moses!"
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
MADE HIM A MODEL HUSBAND.
Plucl1y New jersey Woman Compels
Spouse to Take Novel
Oath.

New Jersey, the land of oddities,
comes to the front again with phe-
nomenal matrimonial agreement, alb
solutely without parallel anywhere.
Some time ago Hugo Kreig and his
wife, of Hawthorne, had quarrel and
separated. He soon wearied of the con-
dition of loneliness into which the dis
agreement had plunged him and
prayed to be restored to her favor. The
only condition upon which she would
consent to a reunion was that he SUBJ
scribe to the following oath:
I'm consideration of the fact that my
wife allows me to return home and re-
side there and enjoy her companion
ship, love and care, I, Hugh Kreig, do
hereby promise to begin anew, treat
my wife properly and return home be-
fore ten o'clock when not absent on
mutual engagements.
Il do promise to work for her and
support her as my position in life will
allow.
II do promise further to attend
prayer meeting, to abstain from all in
toxicating liquor, also from tobacco
and cigars, and in future to conduct
myself in strictly decent. sober and
orderly manner."-Oath taken before
a magistrate by Hugo Kreig, of Haw-
thorne, n. J.
Mrs. Kreig wrote out the oath. At
first it staggered him. He walked about
the village for two weeks cogitating
and wavering. Then he resolved to do
it and called in Magistrate John Keys.
''I'm tired of eating cold dinners and
having nowhere to live" he said. my
wife is the best little woman in New
Jersey and I'm going to take that oath
and stick to it if I can"
The magistrate was a little opposed
to the oath. 'There aren't amy wings
on your shoulders" he said, land
don't believe you can keep it." But
Kreig said he could, and the oath was
administered.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS.

Didn't it make Mr.. Stuyvesant
mad to have Mr.. Peterby give Miss
nensonhurst a canary bird?" We'll,
IT it did, he never showed it. He
simply hurried up and bought her
cat."-Brooklyp Eagle.
YES, that cheeky young Winter
green made a friend of the naughty
Mrs. De Young the very first time he
met her!" ''How did he do it," "He
asked her if her hair wasn't prema-
turely gray Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Bingley-"Well, old man, I'm to be
married Tomorrow" Naggs-''I hope
you have thought this over carefully,
Bingley; do you love her?'' Bingley
-"Oh, don't be sentimental! The girl
has money-isn't that enough ?''-Ohio
State Journal.
Il think I'll let you measure me
for a sack suit out of this CLOTH" said
Crolly, indicating his preference.
"Very WELL" said his tailor, 81 can
make you that suit for $50 or $780,
whats the idea in the two prices 90
cash or credit -Philadelphia Press.
Landlady-"Beg pardon, sir, but did
1 understand as you were a doctor OF
music?" Musician-"I am, ma'am:
why?" Landlady-"Well, sir, my Bill.
ly ave just been and broke is con.
certina, and I thought as 'ow I shud
be glad to put hodd job in yer way
Fun.
Giglamps-"Hashly is the luckiest
man know" Sharpley-"Why,
thought him particularly unfortu
nate.' Giglamps-"Why, he draws {
pension for being wounded in war
and now he is to get damages for hav
ing been hit by trolley car" -Towr
Topics.
The Right Pitch. - Flatte - 81
thought I'd practice on my cornet last
evening, but to save me 1 couldn't
get the right pitch on it," Bratte-
"Couldn't you get the window open .
whats the window got to do with
it?' "Well. the right pitch would
have been through at.''-Philadel
phia Record.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23

The leading exporters of stone have
organized themselves into combine.
and all their sales of stone to foreign
countries must be made through the
headquarters at Kristiania.
Henrik Ibsen's latest drama was re-
Gently presented at theater in Mos
COW, Russia. The play was we'll re-
celved, and some more of Ibsen's pro-
auctions will be presented.
Trondhjem has IS, 020 inhabitants.
A number of small steamers cleared
$1,000 each during the fall season by
fishing herring with drift nets off the
coast OF Sondmore. This result is so
satisfactory that many new steamers
Will enter this field next season.
Olaf Norli, a Kristiania publisher,
has issued what is called an Ibsen cal
endar. It is birthday album, and
every day of the year has motto
CLEANED from the works of Henrik
Ibsen. The quotations are good, bad
or Indifferent. Many mottos have
evidently been chosen with a view to
prominent men who were born on the
dates to which such mottos are dedi-
Gated. No reference is given to the
particular work from which each mot
to is taken. On the cover of the back.
lbsen's enigmatic face appears be-
tween two storks.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
BITS OF FACT.

Seventy years ago there were no
public libraries in America.
Total number of patents granted
in the last 62 years, 1,073,950.
To carry a ton of wheat from Buff
falo to New York in 1900 cost $500;
to-day it costs $3.50.
There have been $1,000 patents
granted for carriages and wagons in
the last century.
The "forty-niners" drove to Ca1ifor-
MIA in covered wagons in ten weeks;
to-day you may go in a palace car
in Az days.
An electric railroad between Rome
and Naples is proposed, the line being
1873 miles long. The idea is to fur
nish fast trains, with frequent serv-
zee.
Of the 1924 cities of 1890 only "a ex-
listed as villages in 1900. Five began
in 1910, - in 1920, seven in 1880, IS
in 1910, "a in 1850, II in 1860, and six
in 1870.
Cottages for aged married paupers
are about to be built by the guardians
Of the Hunslet union, Leeds. They are
to have separate entrances, with gar
dens in front, and the cost of construc-
ton will exceed 6 $4,000.
We're it not for matter floating in
suspension in sea fwater-minute liv-
ing organisms and air bubbles due to
the breaking of the waves, all OF
which reflect lignt-the ocean would
look as black as ink, for in that case
none of the suns rays, having once
penetrated it, would be reflected to
it's surface :=:T !, go G%s >>t#s>-<
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
Why Should He Care3

Mrs. Smith repeatedly reminded her
husband that the silver was hers, the
furniture was hers, and so on, until
poor Smith almost wished he had mar
ried girl without penny.
The other night Mrs. Smith awoke to
hear strange voices in the lower part
OF the house, and, vigorously punching
her husband in the ribs, called:
John, get up! There are burglars
down below"
"Eh - inquired Smith, sleepily.
Burglars - downstairs! shrieked
Mrs. Smith.
''Burglars?' said Smith, as he turned
over. SWELL, there's nothing of mine
there" -1llustrated Bits.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
Anuovances If Wealth.

Wrest-Tell you, my friend, the rich
has their troubles.
Dawson-Bet your life, I do. Onst
when I had two pairs of pants found
the labor of changing things from one
set of pockets to the other set of pock-
cts almost more'n 1 could stand-In-
dianapolis Press.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
Not So InSenuOus.

"Miss Chatterby called on me to-
day." remarked Miss Cayenne. 81 was
very glad to see her. She seemed to
take a great interest in me-
"But isn't she just bit of a tale
bearer?''
eyes. That's why I was glad to see
her. 1t fatters me to feel that am
SO important as to be gossiped about" "
-Washingt Star.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
No Backbiter,

Mr.. Johnson-Did you remawk at de
club last night dat looked like lob
ster, sub?
Mr.. Jackson-No, sub; am no back
bitter. sub! If I wished to cast any as
PERSONS upon de lobster family,
should go right to fsh-market and
do it straight to deyr faces, sub! OATS
my style, suh!-Puck.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
Uses of Economy.

You need a new suit of clothes"
she remarked as she looked him over
critically.
II know it as we'll as you do he re-
piled, 'but [ am economizing. made
up my mind some time ago to save
up little money"
"And have you succeeded" she
asked.
"A little," he admitted.
"Good!" she exclaimed. II hope it's
enough to buy me a new bonnet -
Chicago Post.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
Returned with Thanks.

II come" began the poor woman
in the thin shawl, Ito ask you for
something to keep the wolf from the
door,"
The manufacturer took something
from shelf.
Here is one of our patented game
traps. Set it a little distance away
and the wolf will never reach the
door" -Chicago Daily News.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
He Has to Be.

1T seems to me your husband is
more considerate in his treatment of
the servants than in his treatment of
you,' suggested the old friend.
"Naturally,' replied the wife. 1--WE
got to stay and they haven't
cago Post.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
She Had Noticed.

Mr.. Manhasset Tin justifcation)-
You will often hear it argued that
the presence of young lady type
writer in an Office has a refining in
duencc.
Mrs. Manhasset (acridly)-Well, I
have noticed that since you engaged
one, instead of growing "What's
that?' or ''Umph!" when I speak to
you, you have acquired the habit of
saying, "What, dear?" and ''Eh, love ?"
Brooklyn Eagle.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
The Grateful Maid

Young Lady-Give me one yard of
why, haven't I seen you before?
Shop Assistant-Oh, Maud, can you
have forgotten me? I saved your life
at the seaside last summer.
Young Lady (warmly)-Why, OF
course you did! You may give me
two yards of this ribbon, please
Tit-Bits.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
Not Entirely ested

Little Bessie-I like you better than
sisters other beau.
The Beau-I'm glad to hear that.
Why do you like me?
Little Bessie-'Cause sister never
eats the cheap candy you bring, and
get all of tn. Y. Journal.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
The Reason.

The cold makes Phyllis look a. fright
1t puppies her sweet nose:
1t reddens both her pretty eyes.
Moreover nips her toes.
Still Phyllis doesn't hate the cold,
The reason of it is,
Her daddy is the iceman,
And needs it in his "biz.''
Brooklyn Life.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
Perfectly Hnrrid.

Mother (at balD-Are you enjoy
ing yourself, dear?
Daughter-No, I'm not.
"What is the matter?"
give refused George six dances
hand running, and he doesn't seem
miserable bit. IN. Y. Weekly.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
LIQUID LIGHT.
A Luminous Connection Supplied by
Science in Portable
Bottles.

is bottled light.
1t is substance made Of tiny phos-
phorescent creatures. Millions Of
them can live in a pint of water.
A bottle of these creatures makes a
glowing light that throws out no heat
and will last for months, says the
New York World.
Raphael Dubois, the French scien-
fist, is the discoverer of this living
light.
This living phosphorescence is really
the result of chemical and physiolog-
ical processes. and to it is owing the
light of the glow-worm and: FREELY and
the luminosity of the southern seas.
NJ. Dubois, by making ''cultures' of
certain phosphorescent microbes, or
photo bacteria, has succeeded in pro-
ducing highly luminous liquid which
diffuses light similar in appearance
and intensity to bright moonlight.
A bottle filled with this liquid and
placed in a large room enables the
occupant to make out the time by
a watch, read print and recognize faces
at several yards distance. Think of
making light as a medical prescription
is made up.
The bouillon, or culture liquid, is
composed of water, sea salt, glycerin
or mannite and certain phosphated
ingredients. Another liquid, which is
cheaper, is made from oil-cake. but
this must be sterilized to prevent the
development of putrefactive microbes
which would destroy the photo-bac
terra.
Either of these cultures, properly
prepared, retains it's luminosity for a
long time. Samples kept six months
in a dark cellar were still luminous.
When the light fails, shaking the liquid
often renews it.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23

Erastus-What's y fnkin' about?
Ephraim- I reckon rs fnkin'
about de same fng ez yo' is fnkin'
about.
Erastus-Oh, yo' 60 long. I nevah
stole chicken in nah life.-Chicago
Inter Ocean.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
Three Dangerous Drugs.

DR.. James Barr expresses his opin-
ion in the Lancet that antipyrin,
phenucetin and acetanilid do a great
: deal of mischief in typhoid fever and
are wholly unnecessary for any other
disease Chicago Chronicle,
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
Worked Both Ways.

.I can't have lost all my good looks" said
shadyside; "for I can still obtain a seat in
a crowded street car"
ooh, .well,' replied Miss Shadyside, ''you
know the men will give seats to 6 age as
well as to youthful beauty" Pittsburgh
e-Telegranh. - E1.... -
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
Judge
Not by Choice.

"When does a man become seam
stress?''
''When he hens and haws."
mo"
"When he threads his way"
no.
"When he rips and tears"
NO"
''Give it up
"Never, if he can help it."-Bos1on
Christian Register.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
Cruel.

"They say my face is t<eam!" ex-
claimed the girl who wisheS to go on
the stage.
p "Yes, fades away each night" retort-
ed the heartless goung man.-C Chicago
Daily News. >*,= - - ( -.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
The WrOn: Sort.

Mrs. Subbub-Out of work? Non
sense! you could easily get work if
you wanted it.
Hungry Higgins-Well, ter tell yer
the truth, ma'am, what I'm looking
fur is a snap.
Mrs. Subbub-A snap, Ell? Here,
Rover, Rover. Sic 'im.-Philadelphia
Press.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
Judging by Appearances.

Dyer-Is that solemn-looking young man
across the way an undertaker:
Gyer-Yes; that is, he is a grocery clerk
a salary Of six dollars week.-Ch;cago
Evening News.
& Ages of Man.
CAT 25," remarked the amateur philoso-
pher, "a man is eager to reform the world.
At so he is about ready to be reformed him
sef."-Philadelphia North American. -
A Breach Of Etiquette -He RI notice YOU
don't speak to the Uptowns any more What
have they done 2" She-Done? Vulgar
things! Lost all their money! Philadel-
.phia Bulletin. SIS,
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23

. Reindeer meat in Alaska brings one
dollar per pound; skins of the ani-.
mails are ten dollars each; $12O .is1
readily paid for trained pack rein
#lecr. rs Sss5
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
Hearing VS.. Listening.

Ere we were wed, when Mabel spoke a
word
did not need to hark-I always heard.
But things have oddly changed since
then. Somehow,
I've learned to listen, without hearing
now.
Judge.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
His Credit Exhauxted.

mpecune-I have a vision of the
poorhouse ever before me
Bilyuns-Come, come, cheer up! Why
do you borrow trouble in that way?
1mpecune-Because Ir.can'tt borrow
anything else.-Town ToplNs.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
His Name for 1t.

Johnny" said Mr.. Gazzam, "Dr.
Doce has left his case of medicines and
instruments here. Get on your wheel
and take it to his Office"
Whereupon Johnny mounted his BIZ
cycle and delivered the case, with this
remark:
"Here, doctor! You left your repair
kit at our house. '-Puck.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
Back Action.

"They say massage will cure ba!dn:ss?
Nonsense! I know men who got bald
trying to learn to pronounce massage -
Indianapolis journal. .-,.~' l.,
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
527T21kiff + IS ,;
Advantaxes of Education.

Advantages of Education.
Successful Farmer (whose son has
been to college)-What was all that
howlin' you was doin' out in tn grove?
Cultured Son-I was merely showing
Miss Brighteyes what a college yell is
like.
Farmer-Wall, swan! Colleges is
some good after all. I'm goin' into
town to sell some truck tomorrow.
You kin go along an do tn callin'.-N.
Y. Weekly.
= A Modern Parallel.
When Orpheus twanged Apollos Tyre
Trees and rocks moved that heard him
play:
When Mabel her pianos wire
Twanged night and day, without tire.
She made her neighbors move away.
Judge,
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
TOO CRUEL,

"Look here, Maria, it's a bit unreason-
able loading me up like this. You
ought to have married a horse-not a
man,
Perhaps that's why married q
donkey, eh ?''-Ally Sloper. =
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
Getting Even.

- "Miss Bunk avenged herself on me
for neglecting her invitation"
"How?''
"She told everybody that I was old
enough to be triAe forgetful." Chi
cago Record.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
The Difficulty.

De man dat borrows trouble,
He is on a dang'ous tack.
he kahn fin no one to take it
When he wants to pay it back.
Washington Star.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23

st. Paul. Jan. 1.-THE sessions of
both senate and house yesterday were
short, as they will undoubtedly con-
tinue to be, until the weighty question
of the senatorship is disposed Of
Ten bills were introduced in the SEN
ate and sixteen in the house, all of
which went to appropriate committees
where they will remain for some time
before being heard from.
One of the senate bills authorizes
county commissioners to employ ex-
perts, or perhaps detectives, to hunt
up tax dodgers. It has grown to be a
regular business for class of men, ex-
perienced in that line of work, to go
to county commissioners and offer to
collect taxes on shares, the general
charge being one half of all they col
lect. In some cases this arrangement
has been carried out and in others
some indignant tax payer has brought
suit to prevent the commissioners
from making the division and the
courts have decided that it was an H.
legal act on their part. The bill Of
fered in the senate authorizes the
tions and one offered in the house
the limit of Is per cent the sum the
county commissioners can pay the de-
tectives.
A bill was introduced in the house
to punish kidnapping, making the
maximum penalty twenty years i'm
prisonment.
Another house bill abolishes the
present board of charities and correc-
tions and authorizes the governor to
appoint three men as a state board OF
control who shall have charge of all
penal and charitable institutions in
the state. This board is to appoint
| wardens, superintendent and all ex-
ecutive officers of the institutions
thereby taking much patronage away
from the governor. The secretary is
to have a salary of $4,000, and the
Office of state architect is created,
with salary of So, 900 attached.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23

One of Life's Little Ironies.
We buy new shoes and then begin
To get them nicely broken in,
But by that time, or just about,
We find those shoes are broken out.
CHICAGO Record.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23

It is mystery to us where all the. bad
cigars were smoked before the days of the
open trolley cars.-Detroit Journal.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
The Henpecked Man

II called my wife "A Bird in a Gid
ed Cage"
swell, I called mine about the
same"
''You did?"
eyes; I called her q parrot. Chi
cago Daily News.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1901-01-23
Faithful to Her Trust.

Yeast-You seem to have had that
cook of yours for long while.
Crimsonbeak-Overs six years.
"Is it possible?"
Eyes; she's my mother-in-law, you
know."-Yonkers Statesman.