The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1901-08-23

Two of our prominent citizens who live
within Il thousand miles Of where the
writer is domiciled met in the public road
ver>ation occurred:
'Wha1'> the news!'
They've captured Aguina:do.'
"CapIured who?'
"Aguinaldo.''
whats he been doing?''
"killing folks
Excitedly) WHO has he killed."
''Oh. lots of people,"
Where is the scoundrel?'
Hes in Jail
More exciteD Let's get crowd and
lynch him."
1T would BE- too expensive
"Expensive! What's going to make it
expensive?'
Hes too far off,
why. amt he. in Moultrie jail?'
Not a bit of it,"
"Well, where is he, then?''
He's in jai! at Manila. -
you mean Camilla. don't you?'
NO. | mean what | say.
How far is it,"
About eight thousand miles,
Get up, jack" AS he moved off he
was heard to calculate: Got no time to
talk with every fool l meet in the road.
Eight thousand miles! Why. that's clean
outside Of Geergy: Aguinaldo? Don't be-
lieve there is such a man in the world.
Never heard Of such a place as Man
dc nothing but read newspapers are
mighty smart. Get up Jack: lost half
an hour talking with that slOphead when
I ought to been home planting taters. -
Moultrie Observer.
"Yes,'' said the reformed man to an
impecunious friend, why don't you give
up some Of your expensive luXuries
Now. for instance, look at me. gave up
smoking about year agQrl decided l
could do without it. Last month made
a calculation as to how much l had saved
up to date and it amounted to a consid-
cradle sum. l then opened an account in
one of the many New York savings
banks. and ~
Gould you lend me $1O?'' broke in the
other impet"ously. IN pay you
And the hank failed yesterday. Er-
you haven't such thing as cigar
about you, have ?"-Judge.
Col. Andrew s. Burt of the Twenty
fifth infantry (coloredl is an officer who
rose from the ranks, and he has never
failed to take fatherly interest in the
Ntl1ife anu happiness Oh MS men. 11t
believes the best way for them to pass
away the tedious hours of garrison duty
is to play baseball and other outdoor
games. He often acted as umpire. and
on one occasion, despite his gray locks,
decided to take a hand himself Strip
ping off his coat. he took the place OF
one of the players.
When called to bat he turned to the
captain of his team and informed him
that for the nonce he, was Just one OF
| the players: not the colonel The dusky
captain did not Immediately reply. but
as soon as the colonel batted three.
hasgcr he was after him like mad bull
"Go down! Go down! Yo' skinny, pie
faced, bowlegged little debble. Stir yo
foots. yo' son OBJ CT camp cook! Dat'>
| right. Kick de stuttin' out'n dat second
bascman: Run; whoop 'em up! Yo
runs lax er COW; youse er wooden man
| Wy dean yo' stir 20 foots? OATS it
Run lax er corp'le was terhine yo'''
| This stream Of abuse, mixed with much
profanity, and with all the pet names
belonging to a colonel. was continued
until the dignifed old soldier finally
crossed the home plate. He said nothing
until he had invested himself with his
coat. Then he faced the dusky baseball
captain, who gravely saluted. Private
Johnson, l am now and from hencefortt
Col. Burt Go on with your game
| Now Work TimoS