davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31
HE GOT THE MONEY.

From the London Answers: A Hen
ley man has a son, aged 6, who re-
Gently clamored for money. after the
manner of small boys.
What do you want to do with itT'
asked his father.
"Oh, nothing" responded the boy
indefinitely.
You have plenty Of spending money,
and l buy you everything you need or
ought to want. Unless there Is some
special reason. l can't let you have
it. There isn't any reason, is there?"
mot exactly; but l want it. You
know how it is, papa; you were lit
tie boy once"
This appeal failed to move the pa
ter's heart. so the youthful diplomat
said:
Papa, suppose was to meet high
wayman in a lonely street late at
night"
Eyes; my son."
"And suppose he should pull out q
pistol and say, Little boy, your money
or your life!' what could I do?"
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31

John Newman, formerly an Indian
fighter and pioneer of Arizona, re-
Gently recovered bar Of bullion worth
$4,000, which he had buried in the
ground at the root of tree near Phoe-
nix, Ariz., more than thirty years ago
during an Indian attack. He was
driven out Of the country, but made a
map of the surroundings from men,
DRY. He returned year later, but
the face of the country was altered,
and he could not find his map. He
went to Europe, and has been living
in London nearly ever since. A few
months ago he discovered the old map,
or chart, among some papers. He had
accumulated little money by mining
in South Africa, and with 1t he pur-
chased a ticket to this country, and,
with friend, began a search for the
lost bullion. He located the tree and
recovered the bar.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31

The elevator cure is the latest. 1t
is widely known in New York. as an
elevator man in any big skyscraper
will tell you. Three out Of every four
women who ride in this car" said one
of the Battery Park building employees,
the other day, 'are taking the 'ele-
vator cure How does 1t cure? And
what? Search me. The motion is
supposed to have beneficial effect on
the circulation of the blood or some
thing. Some Of the men try it, too,
but the women have 1t the worst.
Whenever a stranger comes up to me
and asks for a fictitious person,
know they are after the ride and moth
ing else. Some of the sharp ones gen.
orally pick out name in the direc-
tory before they enter the car. They
never go into an Office, however, and
always take the next car down."
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31
WESTERN cANADA's
DECEMBER WEATHER
Equal to That Of May In Minnesota.


To the Editor:-Thomas Regan and
@. Collins Of Eden Valley, Minnesota,
went out to Western Canada last De-
cember as delegates to look over the
grazing and grain lands that are being
offered at such low prices and reason
able terms. This is what they say:
"Wearrived in Calgary about the goth
of December and although we had left
winter in Minnesota and Manitoba, we
were surprised to find beautiful warm
weather at this point, quite equal to
what we have In May in Minnesota.
There was no snow nor trace OF win
ter to be seen, and the climate was
really splendid. Horses. cattle and
sheep were running out. in prime con-
dition.. with plenty Of feed ON the prai.
rie, and really better than that of ours
stabbed in the south. We are i'm
pressed with this country as one OF the
finest mixed farming countries We
have ever seen. The immense tracts
of fertile lands we'll sheltered and
abundantly watered leave nothing to
be desired.
Leaving Alberta we returned east
and visited the Yorkton district in
Assiniboia. We drove out about ten
miles at this point and were highly
pleased with the splendid samples Of
grain we were able to see-wheat
yielding 25 bushels, oats go bushels.
Roots were also good specimens. From
what we have seen. we have decided
to throw in our lot with the York.
toners-satisfied that this part of the
country will furnish good opportuni-
ties for anyone anxious to make the
best Of really good country"
ANY agent Of the Canadian govern
ment whose advertisement appears else
where in the columns Of your paper
will give you full particulars OF the
new districts being opened out this
year in Assiniboia and Saskatchewan.
Yours truly, Old Reader.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31
nrrRInUTION ON THE SPOT.

RETRIBUTION ON THE SPOT.
The noise made by the burglar inthe
Ferguson pantry, slight as 1t was, dis
turbed the light sleeper in the bedroom
not far away and the midnight marau-
der was surprised a moment later to
find himself covered with big revolv-
er In the hands of a determined LOOK
ing man In a long. white robe.
II hain't done nothin' but eat few
cold victuals, mister" stammered the
burglar.
II see," sternly replied George Fer
guson. you have been eating the re-
mains Of a strawberry shortcake my
wife made for my dinner last night.
Do you know what I'm going to do
with your"
Turn me over to the police, !
s'pose," gasped the helpless thief.
Worse than that" said Ferguson.
with ferocious grin. I'm going to
make you eat quart of health food.
It's a new kind my wife heard Of and
fixed up for us yesterday, and it's
pretty dry eating. but you'll eat every
particle of it or I'll bore six holes
through you. There 1t is. in that big
bowl. Turn yourself loose on it,"
With grim determination the indig-
nant householder stood over him till
1t was finished, after which he picked
up the !uckless scoundrel, who had
fallen exhausted to the floor, and
threw him out Of the open pantry
window.
ut may kill him." soliloquized Mr..
Ferguson somewhat remorsefully as he
crawled back into bed without disturb
ing the rest Of the family, but a man
who breaks into another mans house
takes his life in his hand anyway
Chicago Tribune.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31

Emperor Williams public plants
against the weakening authority Of the
crown must raise a mile in Turkish
councils, where preventive measures
abound. avoid suggestive dots II
the body of an article" reads a re-
cent official circular to Turkish news.
papers; they tend to raise suppose
lions and disturb the tranquility Of
the readers mind" Again: DO moi
publish articles too long for compile
tion in a single issue. The notice, TIC
be continued causes an uncomfortable
tension of the mind" Piquant formu.
las, certainly; only the sultan seems
to forget that other phrase. 1.-THE end
which sooner or later must be writ
ten for all governments not republi-
can in form.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31

A CLEAR CASE AGAINST THE BOY.
81 had a funny dream last night"
said the young man to his father,
whose income was $4,000 an hour.
"It seemed that you had decided not
to build libraries or universities that
would serve to perpetuate your men,
ory, but instead, had made up your
mind to withdraw from business-to
just pull out with your $620,000,0 900,
and let somebody else have the same
kind Of chance that you had when
you started, and the richest man in the
country was worth only about $500. 900.
"Then, after throwing off all these
cares you got to filling your pockets
with money and going around hunting
for people who really needed lift, and
every little while 1t seemed that you
would run across somebody who was
just about to be compelled to give up
the struggle, and you'd give him
enough to set him on his feet, or, at
least to make him comfortable in his
last hours. and then you'd stand back
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31
SCOTCH WIT.

From Spare Moments A drunken
Irishman was once lodged in the cell
Of a-Scotch country police station.
when he made tremendous noise by
kicking the cell door with his heavy
hob-nailed boots.
The constable who had charge Of the
police station, going to the cell door.
opened 1t little and said
Man, We MIGHT pit aft yer butts. an
I'll gle them bit rub. SO that yell be
respectable when We come up afore the
bailie the MORN"
The prisoner, flattered at the re-
quest, at once complied, and saw his
mistake only when the constable shut
the door upon him, saying coolly
"Ye can kick ava, moo. my man, a.
lang as We like"
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31
sYMpArnY NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS..

From the Boston Advertiser l was
walking in the direction of certain
hospital the other morning when no.
ticed little girl some Eve or six years
old toddling along at my heels. When
ever stopped, she stopped and wait
ed for me until I started on again.
well, Bess," Queried. She looked
coyly down at pair Of ragged shoes.
What do you want? A cent?" l
ventured.
She shook her head. II wants to
foller yer to der hospital"
Cali right. Come along" answer
ed. But what are you afraid Off"
I'm a-scared to 60 alone. So l fol-
lers some one"
Scared of what?"
Der Salvation Armory," she an
swered.
"Dey ketches yer and brings yer in
ter der armory house, an den dey says,
Yer my chile an SO I'm scared"
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31

American public schools and educa'
tional methods are going to the ends
of the earth. Cuba. Porto Rico, Ha'
wall, and now the Philippines, are
making the acquaintance of American
teachers; and that they are good
teachers is plainly indicated by the
care with which the war department
through the civil service commission
is selecting them. Applications fol
positions are pouring in at the rate Of
twenty-five a day. Only those are
chosen who are graduates of either a
college or a normal school, have had
several years experience in teaching
and now hold positions, and can Offer
conclusive proof Of success In theiI
work.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31
NEW FAST TRAIN TO COLORADO
VIA MISSOURI PACIFIC RAIL-

The Missouri Pacific Railway is now
operating double daily service from
st. Louis and Kansas City to points in
Colorado, Utah and the Pacific coast.
Trains leave st. Louis 900 a. m. and
1910 p. m, Kansas City 900 p. m. and
1000 a. M, carrying through sleeping
cars between st. Louis and San Fran
cisco without change. Excursion tick
cts now on sale. For further informa-
ton address Company's agents.
H. C. TOWNSEND, :
G. P. G. T. Agent, St. Louis, Mo.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31

Fully 1900 acres in the Pecos valley
south from Roswell to Barstow, Tex,
q distance of ITO miles, will be planted
this year to cantaloupes, with an es-
timated yield of 1000 carloads of the
melons, or something less than a car
load to the acre. The crop will be
shipped direct to Chicago, and will
have an average net market value of
$3.50 a carload-the minimum a car
load being $500. with maximum Of
$500,
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31
LITTLE LAUGHS.

Neighbour saw the doctor at your
door this morning. Is any one sick?"
Nellie (aged 5)-"Yes'm. Papa's got
the explanatory rheumatism" Neigh
bor-"Oh, no. You mean inflammatory
rheumatism" Nellie-"Well, anyway.
he Just hollers all the time"
I'm very much afraid I'll never
meet Jou in heaven, Johnny" said a
Sunday school teacher to mischiev-
GUS pupil why" exclaimed the in
corrigiblc youth, what have you been
doing now"
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31
.xmkmsff2fS
- Ssf1 46$5'Ne$&SsEk

and smile and seem to enjoy yourself
seeing the Joy you had given to Others.
Sometimes you would fairly yell with
delight at the good things you had
done, and one OF these outbursts SEEM
ed so real that 1t actually woke me
up"
Great heavens!" the troubled mag
nate exclaimed; that wasn't dream.
Your mother had an uncle that went
insane. I've always been afraid 1t
might crop out again, and now my
worst fears are realized. Here-Help!
Help!"-Record Herald.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31
WHY THE ENGL1sHMAN DIDN'T.

Pretty Angelina Swizzleblossom had
fallen from her wheel and sprained her
wrist, and Augustus Bloomengarden,
her manly escort, was kneeling by her
side endeavoring to bind handker-
chief about the disabled member.
Rubber neck, rubber neck" yelled a
nearby newsboy to passing wheel
man, who turned to look back at the
pathetic scene. But her neck isn't
hurt, don't you know" replied the as
tonished Augustus. and the newsboy
went and pounded his head against q
lamp post.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31
KANSAS AGITATOR.
BARNETT, KANSAS
BARNETT,
KANSAS,

The state legislatures have been d.
viding the respective states into con-
gressional districts. The law under
which they are acting calls for dis
tricts made Of contiguous and COM
pact territory, and containing as near
ly as practicable an equal number Of
Inhabitants. The legislatures should,
in fair play. live up to the spirit OF
this law, even n the ways Of enforc'
ing its letter are shrouded in some
uncertainty.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31

Heat quart of white stock to a
boil. Stir in two cups Of the cold
cooked fish, freed Of skin and bones
and minced fine. Add pepper, salt, a
tablespoonful of chopped parsley and
great spoonful of butter. Heat a
cup of milk to boiling. thicken 1t with
a white roux and half-cupful Of fine
cracker crumbs. When the fish has
cooked, in the soup for five minutes.
stir the liquid into the thickened milk
and serve.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31
our unrrateful World.

This is an ungrateful world. It not
infrequently happens that the man
who laughs the loudest at the mother.
in-law jokes at the vaudeville show In
the man who lives at the expense Of
his wife's mother and depends upon
her to supervise the cooking. perhaps
to do it.-Boston Transcript.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31

Black satin-faced cloth, the circular
applied ruffle at bottom of skirt being
entirely tucked, and the top cut into
fancy points. The bolero is cut low at
the neck, but the undervest fits just
to the stock. It is of pale yellow cloth,
embroidered with silver and gold. This
embroidery is repeated in Napolecn4c
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31
washin g tons False Teeth.

The Baltimore Dental College, the
Oldest dental college III the world, has
in its possession one of the most in
teresting relics of George Washington.
This relic is a set of artificial teeth.
made by DR.. Greenwood, dentist, who
was also an officer in the Continental
army. The teeth were worn for some
time by Gen. Washington. DR.. Green
wood afterward made the general a
second set, which he wore until his
death, which was buried with him.
The first set was afterward presented
to the dental college by DR.. Green
wood. AS much as $4,000 has been Of
fered for this set of teeth, but the fac
ulty of the college refused the offer.
The teeth were exhibited at the
Worlds Fair in 1893 and attracted
much Observation-Disclosures Sun.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31

The chief of police of Bethlehem,
Pa, claims that there is tramps' Sc
cret fraternity. He discovered that
dozen "hoboes" In the lookup the other
night were performing an elaborate
initiation and were working the first
degree upon a new candidate.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31

Department. Store Managers Exactions.
The manager Of retail store In
Chicago pays reward of 81 for every
mistake, Misrepresentation or mac
curacy pointed out in the newspaper
advertisements of that firm, and the
clerks and other employees are alert to
secure the money.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31
Safety Law Disrsgarded.

Chicago has an ordinance requiring
that the windows in tall buildings shall.
be so adjusted as to be washable from
the inside, but the Chicago builders
have disregarded it in thousands of
structures, and nobody seems to feel
called upon to impose the penalties.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31

Automobiles Carry Wounded Horses.
The automobile is put to curious
use at Auteuil. When horse has been
injured in the steeplechases. II It Is
unable to rise, specially constructed
motor car is brought up and the
wounded animal deposited in it and
transported thereby to the care Of the
veterinary surgeons.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31
Higher Mathematics.

The story writer who figures out
that there has been 121 generations Of
the human family beginning with
Adam has done something that ought
to discourage the most enthusiastic
genealOgist.-Boston Globe.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31
AT CHICAGO.

First Attendant: Well. that's the
most discouraging thing I've heard yet.
Second Attendant: What's that!
First Attendant: Here's man from
Jersey City who says he'd rather be
home.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31

Wise is he who remembers that a
soft answer turneth away wrath-es-
pecially when the other fellow is the
bigger.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31

design on the bolero edges. Stock COL
lar of embroidered lawn. Tie and
plaitings of the same at neck and
wrists. High black sash, caught by
gold slide. Black straw hat, fared d.
rectly of the lace. faced with chiffon.
Very low crown, with band and bow
Of black velvet. Bunch OF flowers on
brim edge.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31
BRIDE AND BRIDESMAIDS.


Among the newest fancies for brides
maids flowers are bows and arrows,
the bows made of button roses or
lilies, the arrows or orchids or any
contrasting flower.
Sabots full of blooms hanging from
the arm, and STATS with bouquets on
the top. are dainty. Muffs of flowers,
or rather Of chiffon, with bouquets on
the top made to represent butterflies
are original and charming, and so are
small canoes laden with flowers. which
have only one drawback, that they are
troublesome to carry.
Fans and parasols are considered in
specially good taste as gifts from q
bride to her attendants. The fans may
be used II the day is warm and may
be chosen to make pretty color con-
trasts to the dresses.
Parasols to match or to contrast
with the bridesmaids hats and gowns
are effective for a wedding out Of
town, where the bridal party usually
goes out Of doors after the ceremony.
The pretty sunshades Of the brides
maids are then more decorative, as
well as more useful. than unwieldly
even II beautiful bouquets.
Malay Curry.
Chop finely two large onions and
fry in olive oil or butter until all tho
Juice is extracted. Strain out the pulp
and put the Juice into a frying pan
to which are to be added two cucum-
bers peeled and cut into small cubes.
Cover with milk. add teaspoonful
Of curry which has been dissolved in
little milk. let boil until the cucum-
Der is thoroughly cooked, then add
cooked lobster. crab or shrimp. Boil
for fifteen minutes, salt to taste and
serve with boiled rice.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31
THE USUAL VICTIM.

Ibid any one ever read his play?"
20 yes, indeed. He made his wife
read It,"
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31

Conrad III. Emperor of Germany.
had six fingers on his right hand.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31

black velvet tabs with steel buckles
finish the bodice. The skirt is cir
cular and has plated flounce, headed
by band of appliqued satin similar
to that on the waist.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31

Already several steam plants have
made experiments with the newly de-
veloped oil found at Beaumont Texas,
as so far the tests appear to have been
satisfactory. The Jennings Electric
Light and Power company put in the
necessary apparatus for using the oil
as fuel, and began its use In its large
plant, which supplies the town with
light and power. At Houston also ex-
periments have been made in the same
direction and with satisfactory results,
while several of the canal pumping
stations in Southwestern Louisiana
are getting ready to change their fuel
from coal and wood to oil. II after
full and sufficient experiments 1t is
found that the Beaumont oil will be as
cheap and as satisfactory in other re-
spects as coal, there is no telling the
extent of the demand that will be
made upon the oil wells for steam
heating purposes.
Americans. like the Russians. have
fifth season in each year. The Pc
Rod between the autumns rains and
the winter frost has a name in Russia
which is rendered, "the time when no
man can travel" Our fifth season is
educational rather than meteorologi-
cal. 1t is the graduation season. Then
ever man travels, in memory, back to
diploma days, and each boy and girl
Journeys in anticipation through COM
ing years which are to be bright and
fruitful. The season is once more
near at hand. May 1t bring the usual
treasures of memory and Of hopsI
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1901-05-31

FAWN COLORED CREPE.
With girdle and vest Of yellow sat
in. Brown and yellow satin is APP
pliqued upon the bolero in the form
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-12-13
TEMPERANCE GRIST.

I hardly know any more potent
cause of disease than alcoholism W.
Gull, VI. ID.
A cigarette fend pays the penalty in
the esteem in which he is held
Washington Oa) Democrat.
The production Of both gold and
silver in the United States. including
Alaska. S134,s474s5, would be sufi-
Gent to pay the drink bin Of the Amer
lean people for only month and a
half.
An English law passed in INA pro-
viding that not more than five dol
lars can be recovered for liquor debts,
was tested lately by physician who
owed over $3.50. The law was declared
valid, and the liquor dealer is out S2i5.
A well-known temperance worke-
saws: 81 once examined the inmates
of the Christian Home for Iniemper-
ate Men in New York city as 70 the
way they reached the last ditch Of
drunkenness, and so per cent. told me
that they began with beer"
The last was the century OF effort ia
the cause of temperance, so that hum
dreds Of thousands of abstainers,
young and old. are doing what they
can do to stand between the living
and the dead, and TO stay the terrible
plague Of intemperance.-Christ'an
Work.
The Farmville herald. [volume] (Farmville, Va.) 1890-1934, 1901-12-13
"THE FULL DINNER PAIL"
Some Facts Which Speak EIOquently
TO the Working Man of the " is
dom of Temperance.

The American people spent for
drink last year S1,O59,249,s32. This
money was an absolute loss to the
men who spent it. They received no
valuable thing in exchange for their
cash.
1t was not only a loss, but an ac-
tual damage. 1t impaired their wage
earning ability and reduced their pro-
ductiye power.
1t caused loss to every other in
dustry by reducing the drinkers abil-
ity to buy other things.
Their drinking made harder times
for the grocer, the butcher and baker,
whom they did not pay or could not
patronize.
The amount Of last years drink, if
spent for the necessities of life. would
give work in shop, factory and field
to 1,G4o, $50 men.
1t gives work in producing raw ma
terial and in manufacturing drink to
only 1901 men.
Closed gin mills would mean a
chance to earn a living for l,3iS.6o5
of the men who are now hunting a
job.
4 vote to close the places where
'booze" is sold is a vote for plenty
of food in the dinner pail and upon
the table of every workingman.-
Christian Work.