The Calhoun chronicle. [volume] (Grantsville, W. Va.) 1883-1984, 1901-11-05
BODIES DON'T PETRIFY.
GOVERNMENT EXPERTS HAVE YET
TO LEARN OF AN INSTANCE


Professor Niece Says II is Possible Hu.
man Fertilization May Exist, But He
Doubts it-story of Mrs. Stone Brings a
Weird Smile.
A mild sensation was created at the
chronological Bureau one day recently
says the Washington Post The head
Oh man reported TO be petrificd. and
discovered somewhere in the wildS OF
New Jersey, was forwarded to the bu-
reau and convoCation OF scientists
was called. A young geologi,t connect
{" with the survey had discovered this
temarNable curiosity. and hat sent a
detailed description to the bureau. They
are annual, or, rather semi-annual oc-
currenceS.
No such thing as a human pctrifcs-
ton has ever been discovered" remark
cd Professor w. J. MCGEE. but that is
no reason TO say that it cannot exist.
or has not existed. 1t may be possible.
| doubt it. and everybody else who has
inquired into the matter at all doubts
1t. The human flesh has never been
known to become petrifed. but. never
theleSS any case reported TO US is in
CURED into, so we awaited with some
degree OF curiosity the coming of this
gentleman"
his gentleman was very carefully
packed and the box labelled glass. His
description had aroused general interest.
so there was quite an assemblage of eth
biologists biologists and paleontologists
as well as clerks. and. in fact. the en-
tire bureau force on hand to view the
curious head as soon as it arrived
No sooner was l. unpacked than
! Profc sor MCGEE announced: This is
no petrihed man" Ii so closely resem
bed one, however. tic features we're $
plainly indicated and the substance so
Ike a petridcation that there were qucS-
/ tons: What else Is -" What do
/ ,ou call it," 1t was limestone boul-
der, curiously fashioned. it was true.
INTO features very like human beings.
hut lime;tone boulder none the les.
1t was disappointment
We should like to discover I geru-
inc Petrihed man" remarked one OF the
ethnologists; we should really like TO
hnd one after all these years"
The gentleman being thus rudc,y dc
clarcd a frald remained for a day or
two on exhibition. and was Their fired
back to his original habitation. with a
letter to the young gcologist
But tbs petriiied nan was nothing
compared to his most recent predeces-
scr. His predecessor was a woman.
hey speak of her still at the bureaa
as Mrs. Stone. and hcr story neve- fails
Il bring a weird smile IF 1t mad not
reen for that gas piIe," remarked Pro
lessor MCGEE. Rravely. She would have
been a remarkably fine woman. indeed"
/ All the ethnologists are very mvs-
FERROUS when conversing about her. Her
story Is one of the most pathetic that
the bureau has ever encountered.
She came to us from the West" said
Professor MCGEE. sadly, where they
usually come from. She had been OK
hibited around in small towns. and her
appearance had invariably caused a big
/ sensation and she became the nine davs'
wonder. We heard about her from all
quarters and at length decided to in
vestigate. We had received several let
tiers from the company she was travel
. ing with, which, | must say, seemed to
De anxious to substantiate her reputa-
ton, so we agreed TO send on for her
She came. We went down i'm a BODY
10 the depot to meet her and decided
TO have an inquest at once | did no.
say anything but carried along few
little instruments in my pockets Fer
a petrihed woman. she was certainly ?
remarkable specimen"
The scene Of the inquest was grue
some affair. II was late on a winter at
ternoon, and one gas jet was lit. The
body was laid out in the centre OF the
room in its frame coffin. and Professor
McGee, with much gravity, proceeded
to conduct the services. They consisted
in taking from his pockets those little
instruments and Of boring 4 few inches
into the foot To the amazement of
every onlooker. a small section of gas
pipe was struck. This ended the in
quest. Mrs. Stones reputation as a pro
tessonal was forever spoiled. and she
no longer went gallivanting around the
country passing as the one and only
petrihcd woman ever discovered in the
history of the world"
This was not the only instance Of 4
pcirihed fraud catching popular favor.
here is a factory somewhere out in
which manufactures these petriied hui
man beings By TN. wholesale and dis
tributes them around various sections
OF the country. has them discovered and
.cils them for q stipulated sum for ex-
hbiting purposes They make casts d.
recently from life. One of the worlmen
connected with the establishment, had
club foot One Of the objects issued
by the factory also had tina, club foot
and after its discovery down in the
Pueblo country the pctrifed man with
The club foo. became the sen alton Of
The Wes."
Every kind Of a pe,rifcd human being
linen. women and children. Indians.
giants and what-not has been unearth.
ed 800 remote parts % the United State,
scientist himself . taken in al, in m,
case of the pctrfrd head from New
Jerey
Appliance 70 Woo Sleep